Contest #858


Cartoon

858


Name Value
Submission deadline -
Voting started -
Voting ended -
Finalists announced -
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued -
Number of captions 3691
Number of responses 616719
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 When I said “wait till you see these puppies,” what did you think I meant? 1.6348 0.01861 1706 929 471 306
1 It just depends on what you're looking for -- unconditional adoration or soul-crushing disregard. 1.6251 0.01207 4246 2408 1022 816
2 I Shih Tzu not. 1.6093 0.01803 1899 1102 437 360
3 You can buy or leash them. 1.6066 0.02247 1116 620 315 181
4 Psst. Hey buddy, $10 each, or if you take them all, I'll give you $50. 1.5950 0.01960 1511 868 387 256
5 In-laws have allergies? I've got what you need. 1.5893 0.01608 2184 1249 583 352
6 They fell off a garbage truck, so they’re the pick of the litter. 1.5820 0.01772 1871 1104 445 322
7 Sure, they’ll always be this size. 1.5801 0.01759 1655 917 516 222
8 This one is already pocket-trained. 1.5746 0.02278 985 550 304 131
9 You can claim them as out-of-pocket expenses.” 1.5727 0.01081 5151 3121 1110 920
10 Can I interest you in a chick magnet? 1.5723 0.01728 1756 996 515 245
11 It’s called an Emotional Support Coat 1.5652 0.01611 2010 1151 582 277
12 Like children, only better 1.5600 0.01719 1834 1078 485 271
13 Hey buddy, can I interest you in 10-15 years of responsibility that will inevitably end in total heartbreak? 1.5563 0.02334 1003 595 258 150
14 They’re all named Rolex. 1.5497 0.01850 1550 917 414 219
15 Click on ‘funny’ if you think the New Yorker should find a better way to select the best captions. 1.5496 0.01788 2078 1369 276 433
16 Alright listen, I’ve got hypoallergenic, hyper-allergenic, and your classic regular allergenic. 1.5479 0.02170 1022 581 322 119
17 Hey buddy,can I interest you in an emotional support jacket? 1.5477 0.01860 1448 838 427 183
18 These are the knockoff designer breeds. 1.5473 0.01809 1502 863 456 183
19 All stolen from good homes. 1.5457 0.01680 1774 1030 520 224
20 What you see is what you pet. 1.5457 0.01448 2727 1680 606 441
21 Of course, there is a one-year warranty. For dogs, you divide by seven and for cats, multiply by nine. 1.5430 0.02297 989 587 267 135
22 It’s just a pet project of mine 1.5413 0.01659 1842 1083 521 238
23 I prefer the term ‘rescue.’ 1.5379 0.01647 1742 1000 547 195
24 They'll love you unconditionally, and you don't have to send them to college. 1.5377 0.02849 610 357 178 75
25 Not only is it fashionable, it’s fur lined. 1.5327 0.01408 3015 1934 556 525
26 Or, if you prefer, I also have heroin. 1.5300 0.02442 949 596 203 150
27 No, they're not "hot", just warm ...and cuddly. 1.5244 0.02025 1188 706 341 141
28 I’ve got something for everyone: you want to be greeted with love and adoration, or would you prefer to be glanced at in disgust when you come home from work 1.5210 0.01745 1670 1016 438 216
29 Trust me, I've been vetted. 1.5201 0.01735 1615 966 458 191
30 For an extra hundred, it's a licensed emotional support pet your landlord can't evict. 1.5190 0.01896 1451 895 359 197
31 Take all four and the jacket's yours. 1.5166 0.01881 1357 812 389 156
32 Just say he followed you home! 1.5153 0.02236 885 514 286 85
33 ''These were only used during Covid'' 1.5141 0.01853 1488 917 377 194
34 Your money or I’ll give these to your kids. 1.5137 0.01626 2085 1328 443 314
35 Looking for a little late night companionship? 1.5086 0.01850 1394 843 393 158
36 I got uppers, downers, off-the-couchers... 1.5083 0.01767 1564 955 423 186
37 Take it from me, there’s no better way to feel warm and fuzzy inside. 1.5080 0.01761 1508 906 438 164
38 Unconditional love or mutual indifference? 1.5028 0.01677 1796 1122 445 229
39 I got watch-dogs, watch-cats and watches. 1.5025 0.02744 599 358 181 60
40 You think it just rains these things? 1.5019 0.01914 1329 819 353 157
41 I call it my pet-ti-coat. 1.4937 0.02066 1116 691 299 126
42 Trust me, Bub, you're a cat guy. A dog man doesn't leave the house in slippers. 1.4936 0.01841 1562 1009 335 218
43 Because no dating profile is complete without one of these! 1.4922 0.01809 1410 865 396 149
44 Think of it as an endearing investment.” 1.4913 0.01949 1610 1110 209 291
45 And over on this side we have your non-venomous cuddly pets. 1.4902 0.02200 969 600 263 106
46 Four ways to say ‘I'm sorry.’ 1.4871 0.01958 1474 988 254 232
47 I got the idea from a kangaroo. 1.4865 0.01895 1262 776 358 128
48 And they come with bark and meow alarms. 1.4806 0.02070 1392 964 187 241
49 You look like a guy who likes to scrub carpets. 1.4774 0.02047 1219 796 264 159
50 I’m just trying to challenge assumptions about men wearing trench coats. 1.4738 0.03124 515 336 114 65
51 Can I you interest you in a fur lined coat. 1.4722 0.02102 1063 678 268 117
52 I’ve got your unconditional love or your aloof disdain. 1.4699 0.02120 1079 699 253 127
53 What’ll it be? I got uppers, downers, sitters, barkers! 1.4663 0.02107 1068 690 258 120
54 And they're vaccinated, neutered, and on time. 1.4563 0.02401 938 647 154 137
55 And the kittens come with a full nine-lifetime warranty. 1.4557 0.02224 926 601 228 97
56 How about helping out a vet? 1.4541 0.02357 894 599 184 111
57 Come on, I'll bet she said "surprise me" when you left to get the coffee! 1.4532 0.02309 865 565 208 92
58 I got them in the flea market… 1.4515 0.02362 886 595 182 109
59 Psst…hey Buddy… you looking for some emotional support? 1.4479 0.02379 815 537 191 87
60 Go ahead, pick a pocket. 1.4478 0.02247 853 549 226 78
61 Buy one, get one flea! 1.4477 0.02401 842 565 177 100
62 Hey buddy. I’m talking about chick magnets here. Chick magnets! 1.4467 0.02368 826 546 191 89
63 What? You want a duck? 1.4455 0.02330 826 541 202 83
64 Snuggled goods 1.4451 0.02386 829 553 183 93
65 I call that one Rolex. He’s a great little watchdog. 1.4448 0.02372 861 580 179 102
66 I warned you that hamsters are a gateway pet. 1.4439 0.02700 597 388 153 56
67 Yeah, I do this now. Nobody wears watches anymore. 1.4432 0.02382 801 529 189 83
68 Absolutely! They're all 100% genuine French bulldogs. 1.4425 0.02528 730 487 163 80
69 They're pocket-trained. 1.4421 0.02357 794 520 197 77
70 Hey man, if you're into heavy petting, I got just what you need right here! 1.4406 0.02512 715 473 169 73
71 Hey buddy, wanna buy some unconditional love, or perhaps a cat? 1.4367 0.02614 719 493 138 88
72 Psst...wanna bit of companionship tonight? 1.4336 0.02531 745 508 151 86
73 If you buy all four, you’ll also get a beautiful tote bag! 1.4325 0.02356 719 463 201 55
74 I only sell the good fluff. 1.4324 0.02623 673 455 145 73
75 you look like you could use a best friend 1.4297 0.02560 661 439 160 62
76 Not what you were expecting eh? 1.4229 0.02637 655 447 139 69
77 They all come from good homes. 1.4222 0.02570 630 418 158 54
78 You might think they can’t tell time, but try serving them breakfast a minute late 1.4221 0.02593 642 431 151 60
79 It’s an authentic fur-lined coat. 1.4220 0.04787 173 113 47 13
80 I’ve got everything you need to forget the dread of existence for a while 1.4205 0.02555 635 422 159 54
81 These are indistinguishable from the ones you see on Instagram 1.4201 0.02727 576 387 136 53
82 What I’m offering you is an entertainment system. 1.4195 0.02557 627 416 159 52
83 Trust me -- they need rescuing. 1.4192 0.02480 637 417 173 47
84 Would I wear this if they weren't housebroken? 1.4155 0.02730 568 383 134 51
85 … and keeps on licking. 1.4150 0.02585 653 445 145 63
86 Hey buddy, wanna buy a watchdog? 1.4129 0.02779 620 437 110 73
87 Sure they're housebroken. I just broke into a house and took 'em. 1.4119 0.02754 607 423 118 66
88 They are for emotional support while you hand me your wallet. 1.4116 0.02809 588 411 112 65
89 Hey buddy. Interested in a chick magnet? 1.4113 0.02700 586 399 133 54
90 If they weren't house broken, would I keep them in my coat? 1.4111 0.02767 579 399 122 58
91 Yes, they are coat trained. 1.4105 0.02639 570 380 146 44
92 not stolen, it was raining cats and dogs earlier 1.4097 0.02868 554 386 109 59
93 Psst! Buddy...you look like you could use some emotional support... 1.4096 0.02819 542 371 120 51
94 Can I interest you in a fur-lined coat? 1.4094 0.02739 596 413 122 61
95 I hadda move down here. The cop on the next block told me don’t try anything cute. 1.4089 0.02882 538 373 110 55
96 The only fur-lined jacket approved by PETA 1.4089 0.02695 587 401 132 54
97 Pet shop quality at back ally prices. Act now and I'll throw in the bird under my hat! 1.4086 0.02829 536 367 119 50
98 It’s 100% gabardine, with a removable fur lining. 1.4081 0.02844 566 396 109 61
99 Watches? When you can have a friend for life? 1.4076 0.02685 552 370 139 43
100 Not watches, but they'll tell you when it's time to eat. 1.4075 0.02704 584 400 130 54
101 Bring one of these home to your wife and I guarantee she'll forget for a minute how much she hates you. 1.4072 0.02588 582 388 151 43
102 Wadda ya mean, knockoffs? These are genuine strays! 1.4065 0.02736 551 374 130 47
103 They were just delivered. 1.4058 0.03040 552 402 76 74
104 Seuss just had a cat in the hat ... I've got a kennel in the flannel 1.4056 0.02794 535 365 123 47
105 Business is great but the laundry bill is killing me. 1.4047 0.02687 551 371 137 43
106 Buy a cat. Get the dog free. 1.4040 0.02733 594 414 120 60
107 They’re all a good choice. A very good choice. Who’s a good choice! 1.4040 0.03821 302 210 62 30
108 You look like you could use some responsibility. 1.4038 0.02652 572 387 139 46
109 Trust me, you can't tell the real ones from the fake ones. 1.4029 0.02950 479 328 109 42
110 Yeah, I got tired of fencing merchandise. Now I got merchandise that needs a fence. 1.4027 0.02793 514 348 125 41
111 A hundred a piece. You take the whole bunch, I'll give you five hundred bucks. 1.4023 0.02854 522 360 114 48
112 I’m telling you, these are as strong as any antidepressants. 1.4013 0.03036 476 332 97 47
113 Wanna complicate your existence? 1.4012 0.02743 516 347 131 38
114 Puppies are $25 each. Kittens, we pay you 1.4004 0.02907 502 347 109 46
115 Psst. Wanna buy a watchdog? 1.3981 0.02931 515 362 101 52
116 You only need one and you’re hooked. 1.3977 0.02763 528 361 124 43
117 Nobody buys watches anymore 1.3962 0.02845 520 361 112 47
118 Can I interest you in a genuine mutt? 1.3959 0.03005 485 341 96 48
119 Depends. How bad did you upset the kid? 1.3954 0.02897 526 371 102 53
120 It’s been raining cats and dogs, so they’re on sale! 1.3949 0.02856 471 319 118 34
121 Ok, so here's the deal. Pick 3 for $60 or you can have 'em all for $20" 1.3929 0.03007 481 339 95 47
122 You'll never need a dating app again... 1.3929 0.02989 448 308 104 36
123 We got hot dogs or cool cats. 1.3928 0.03036 499 358 86 55
124 If you're looking for a fine time piece, try one of these guys. They always know when it's morning. 1.3925 0.02984 456 315 103 38
125 Tell all the ladies that you rescued them from an alley. 1.3919 0.02802 472 318 123 31
126 Actually, I'm a hug dealer. 1.3919 0.03026 467 328 95 44
127 They'll always love you and you never have to pay for college. 1.3915 0.02939 493 346 101 46
128 These are 100% real fur. 1.3908 0.02785 499 341 121 37
129 You can walk them with that 14 karat gold chain I sold you last week. 1.3892 0.03003 465 326 97 42
130 Hey pal, looking for love? 1.3889 0.03090 450 318 89 43
131 They're only rescues if you buy one. 1.3886 0.03098 458 326 86 46
132 You call them stolen, I call them rescued. 1.3886 0.03203 422 299 82 41
133 They look exactly like the originals. 1.3870 0.02927 478 334 103 41
134 It’s a fleas market. 1.3864 0.03104 427 299 91 37
135 I also sell pocket protectors. 1.3862 0.03082 448 317 89 42
136 The price is fixed and so are they. 1.3855 0.03020 454 319 95 40
137 You wanna buy a watchdog? 1.3844 0.03206 424 303 79 42
138 No, no, sir. These are pre-pandemic. Guaranteed. They love it when you go to work. 1.3841 0.03172 427 304 82 41
139 Psst. Want some seratonin? 1.3834 0.03148 386 266 92 28
140 100% real fur, guaranteed 1.3831 0.03183 415 294 83 38
141 Think about it. You're going to the park, right? You want to pick up women, right? 1.3827 0.03059 452 321 89 42
142 Yeah, they stay this size. 1.3827 0.03163 405 284 87 34
143 I'll tell you what. For twenty dollars, you can have all four of 'em, plus my eternal gratitude." 1.3826 0.02951 447 310 103 34
144 Best uppers ever! 1.3823 0.03138 395 274 91 30
145 It's a pet project. 1.3812 0.03110 425 300 88 37
146 So, if it rains cats and dogs you are fully prepared 1.3810 0.02931 462 323 102 37
147 Notice the genuine fur lining of this coat. 1.3805 0.03073 452 323 86 43
148 Of course, I’ll still need to conduct a home visit. 1.3801 0.03314 392 281 73 38
149 It's an emotional support coat. 1.3800 0.03166 421 300 82 39
150 Hey, mister, wanna cuddle? 1.3795 0.02994 448 315 96 37
151 Take it from me; you don't want a gerbil. 1.3792 0.02913 451 313 105 33
152 Psst, walked only on Sundays by a Little Old Lady on West 53rd..." 1.3781 0.03096 447 321 83 43
153 Of course they're purebreds! Would I risk my reputation on copycats? 1.3770 0.03089 435 310 86 39
154 Take a look at my pet project! 1.3766 0.03168 385 269 87 29
155 No kid. I'm a "pet-ophile." 1.3765 0.03176 425 306 78 41
156 And they're all microchipped for easy returns! 1.3762 0.03022 412 286 97 29
157 Pssst buddy, you wanna buy a watchdog? 1.3756 0.03185 410 293 80 37
158 They're sold by the pound. 1.3756 0.02997 450 319 93 38
159 Don’t worry, they’re pocket trained. 1.3744 0.03174 398 282 83 33
160 You look like someone who needs help fetching his slippers. 1.3727 0.03866 271 193 55 23
161 Plus, it will hold all your pets. 1.3727 0.03098 373 257 93 23
162 The lining is 100% PETA approved. 1.3712 0.02925 423 293 103 27
163 It's fur-lined without the guilt. 1.3711 0.03187 388 275 82 31
164 Hypoallergenic, yea sure, all four of em’ 1.3711 0.03060 388 269 94 25
165 No one will know they're not a rescue. 1.3701 0.03270 381 273 75 33
166 Psst…Have I got a deal for you! Imagine all the joys of parenthood, without having to change diapers, pay for college, or ever hear “Leave me alone!” 1.3697 0.03102 403 285 87 31
167 Now, these offer the greatest dopamine hit! 1.3694 0.03242 360 253 81 26
168 It’s a pee coat. 1.3688 0.03251 404 294 71 39
169 Emotional support animal documentation included! 1.3687 0.03250 377 269 77 31
170 I'm not merely a cat burglar! 1.3685 0.02965 426 299 97 30
171 ... and they're TikTok ready. 1.3684 0.03183 399 286 79 34
172 I asked myself "Wait a minute, what about all the other days when it's not raining cats and dogs?" And that's how I started my business. 1.3678 0.03126 416 299 81 36
173 Wanna adopt an alarm clock? 1.3675 0.03116 400 284 85 31
174 I'm no longer just a cat burglar. 1.3672 0.03290 384 278 71 35
175 I rescued them. Now it's your turn. 1.3667 0.03192 390 279 79 32
176 Here's the beauty part. They get bigger. 1.3663 0.03286 404 297 66 41
177 Psst…hey buddy. Are you looking for a good time? 1.3659 0.03483 358 263 59 36
178 No puppy mill, here, baby. These beauties are 100 percent alley guaranteed! 1.3653 0.03259 375 269 75 31
179 How else ya gonna find real love these days? 1.3646 0.03389 384 284 60 40
180 The child you never had, the partner you wish you had... all for the price of that gym membership you don't use 1.3644 0.03347 343 244 73 26
181 Anyone of these four will bring you those slippers you’re wearing! 1.3644 0.03208 376 268 79 29
182 No, I'm out of fluffy bunny slippers. 1.3641 0.03087 401 285 86 30
183 No one wears a watch any more. 1.3639 0.03110 404 289 83 32
184 No, no, no. Your son doesn't want a gerbil, believe me. 1.3631 0.03342 336 238 74 24
185 Nobody wears watches anymore so I started selling love instead 1.3629 0.03055 383 268 91 24
186 And if you take them all I'll give you forty bucks! 1.3629 0.03447 372 276 57 39
187 Would you like an extrovert who gets hair all over your sofa or a stoic who gets hair all over your sofa? 1.3610 0.03319 385 283 65 37
188 Hey man... want some dopamine? 1.3606 0.03514 330 240 61 29
189 I’m from Vermont. It’s been raining cats and dogs. 1.3604 0.03246 369 265 75 29
190 They’re not for sale. I just think they’re adorable. 1.3602 0.03467 322 231 66 25
191 This tabby in particular, guaranteed to get over 10,000 likes. 1.3602 0.03487 347 255 59 33
192 I’m trying a softer sell. 1.3596 0.03404 381 284 57 40
193 You've probably mistaken me: I'm only a petpocket. Which one would you like? 1.3589 0.03246 365 262 75 28
194 Psst! Hey Buddy, come meet Cartier, Gucci, Rolex, and Fluffy!" 1.3587 0.03340 368 269 66 33
195 Can I interest you in a reason for being out in your slippers? 1.3586 0.03578 304 219 61 24
196 I don't have a Rolex, but I can sell you a watchdog. 1.3573 0.03362 347 251 68 28
197 I got your serotonin, I got your dopamine… 1.3569 0.03296 353 254 72 27
198 'Not for sale. I just wanted you to have a warm, fuzzy feeling before I rob you." 1.3569 0.03369 353 257 66 30
199 You need one of these to walk around the streets in your slippers. 1.3564 0.03285 362 262 71 29
200 Why do you care what's under the other side of my coat? 1.3557 0.03337 343 247 70 26
201 I cornered the black market in cuddling. 1.3553 0.03195 349 247 80 22
202 Psst… Looking for emotional support? 1.3542 0.03205 367 264 76 27
203 No watches here but I do have Rolex…he’s a watch dog! 1.3541 0.03255 370 269 71 30
204 The sweats, the slippers, the uncombed hair. You'll be perfect for zoom meetings with one of these cuties in your lap. 1.3540 0.03414 339 247 64 28
205 The ultimate drug is happiness. I sell that on this side of the coat, here. 1.3536 0.03346 345 250 68 27
206 I’ve already gotten a few bites. 1.3523 0.03370 352 258 64 30
207 Sure, they come with papers. 1.3514 0.03079 350 245 87 18
208 Their shots and Instagram pages are all up to date 1.3514 0.03309 350 254 69 27
209 I have a beagle on backorder. 1.3510 0.03410 339 248 63 28
210 A little old lady only played with them on Sundays. 1.3504 0.03350 351 257 65 29
211 They just came down in the last shower. 1.3503 0.03471 334 246 59 29
212 Actually, I AM selling drugs...these are my emotional support animals." 1.3503 0.03598 334 251 49 34
213 You'll take a licking, but they'll keep on ticking. 1.3494 0.03459 332 244 60 28
214 I have the miracle cure for melancholy 1.3493 0.03402 292 206 70 16
215 They’re rescues from last week when it rained cats and dogs. 1.3493 0.03225 355 256 74 25
216 The cats moo and the dogs quack but otherwise they’re perfect. 1.3493 0.03437 335 246 61 28
217 Look at it this way. When's the last time a breathing being wanted to be in bed with you? 1.3488 0.03492 324 238 59 27
218 Psst" "Designer pets cheap!" "I've got Furla Purrla, Gucci Poochie, Burberry Furberry, and Cat Spade. 1.3480 0.03410 342 252 61 29
219 Can I tell you about my new pet project? 1.3474 0.03245 331 236 75 20
220 Welcome to the flea market. 1.3466 0.03391 326 237 65 24
221 Can I interest you in an uncertified therapy animal? 1.3460 0.03194 367 267 73 27
222 Yeah, you didn't think you needed a watch, either. 1.3455 0.03491 301 218 62 21
223 The rottweiler's up my trouser leg." 1.3455 0.03388 330 241 64 25
224 ”You want to buy happiness? I got happiness. 1.3454 0.03620 304 225 53 26
225 Yeah, well nobody wears a watch anymore. 1.3454 0.03467 304 220 63 21
226 Upper or downer? 1.3454 0.03680 304 227 49 28
227 It was raining these 1.3453 0.03393 333 244 63 26
228 AND they're all house-trained! 1.3449 0.03540 287 207 61 19
229 Unconditional love for free! (except for the cats) 1.3447 0.03456 293 210 65 18
230 It's warm but it's noisy. 1.3434 0.03585 297 218 56 23
231 Hey! You look like you need a friend. Have I got a deal for you! 1.3432 0.03472 303 220 62 21
232 I sell only to people with deep pockets. 1.3429 0.03468 315 231 60 24
233 And if you look closely they each are wearing tiny Rolex’s. 1.3426 0.03511 324 241 55 28
234 Just for you I'll waive the adoption fee. 1.3421 0.03494 304 222 60 22
235 But wait. On my right, I've got baby pandas. 1.3415 0.03363 325 237 65 23
236 As you can see I'm not just a cat burglar. 1.3410 0.03252 349 255 69 25
237 I was wearing this coat during the recent superstorm when it was raining...well, you know. 1.3407 0.03421 317 232 62 23
238 These are bred specifically to keep you and your wife from wanting kids. 1.3394 0.03433 330 245 58 27
239 If you take all four, I'll throw in the coat. 1.3389 0.03449 301 219 62 20
240 I ran out of watches this morning. 1.3388 0.03362 304 219 67 18
241 If you prefer something bigger, I can show you some New York rats. 1.3386 0.03516 319 238 54 27
242 I sell 'em by the Pound. 1.3385 0.03629 322 245 45 32
243 Of course they come spayed or neutered. What kind of back alley operation do you think I'm running here? 1.3382 0.03808 272 203 46 23
244 I used to be a flasher, and these therapy pets changed my life. 1.3382 0.03261 343 251 68 24
245 These are as real as the watches I also sell. 1.3381 0.03571 278 202 58 18
246 I switched 'cause nobody wears a watch anymore. 1.3378 0.03528 299 220 57 22
247 I’m out of the hard stuff, but look what just came in! 1.3377 0.03631 305 229 49 27
248 Fluffy got 4.2 million likes for her video walking on a piano. 1.3377 0.03486 308 227 58 23
249 I got watch dogs, I got watch cats… 1.3376 0.03432 311 228 61 22
250 And they're already coat-broken. 1.3376 0.03379 314 229 64 21
251 I guarantee your investment will triple in size. 1.3356 0.03616 292 217 52 23
252 This emotional support jacket warms you in every way. 1.3355 0.03452 304 223 60 21
253 Actually, the choice is theirs. 1.3355 0.03443 313 231 59 23
254 I’ve also got ants in my pants! 1.3353 0.03398 334 249 58 27
255 Looking for a companion? 1.3353 0.03555 337 258 45 34
256 Uppers? I guarantee one of these will keep you awake all night. 1.3345 0.03786 284 215 43 26
257 The fun begins when I close my coat. 1.3344 0.03591 302 226 51 25
258 I got your TSA approved emotional support right here. 1.3344 0.03629 308 233 47 28
259 It's a two-fur. 1.3333 0.03410 309 227 61 21
260 Formerly a pick-pocket. Now I'm a pet-pocket. 1.3333 0.03183 324 233 74 17
261 Pure high grade emotional support prescription right here- all natural, no side effects 1.3333 0.03304 315 229 67 19
262 How is it that Beth Lawler made it to the leaderboard, with — ‘It's time you retire, Keith.’; when she only received 3 votes (and they were — ‘Unfunny’)? (See #2484, at: https://nextml.github.io/caption-contest-data/dashboards/850.html ) 1.3323 0.04060 316 258 11 47
263 I got serotonin, I got dopamine, I got oxytocin. 1.3323 0.03445 316 235 57 24
264 They were stolen from a reputable breeder. 1.3322 0.03537 289 213 56 20
265 Guaranteed chick magnets! Ya can't go wrong. 1.3322 0.03386 286 206 65 15
266 It'll take a C-note, plus a note from your landlord, a note from your vet, and two personal references. 1.3310 0.03681 284 213 48 23
267 They're my wife's but I'll pay you to take one. 1.3310 0.03472 284 207 60 17
268 And it comes with a fur lining! 1.3310 0.03674 281 210 49 22
269 I can offer you a great deal with no hidden fleas. 1.3309 0.03559 278 204 56 18
270 It's just for practice until my probation ends. 1.3308 0.03745 266 198 48 20
271 Best part is that I no longer have to bend down to pick up their poop. 1.3296 0.03808 267 201 44 22
272 I used to do dogs and ponies, but it got to be too much. 1.3294 0.03504 252 180 61 11
273 Fresh from the last downpour. 1.3288 0.03579 295 221 51 23
274 If you buy all four I'll throw in the coat. 1.3287 0.03531 289 214 55 20
275 That's what I said, guaranteed to prolong your marriage for three years, pal. 1.3286 0.03476 283 207 59 17
276 And the lining... Genuine fur! 1.3285 0.03708 277 208 47 22
277 Buy all four and get this jacket for free. 1.3281 0.03995 253 193 37 23
278 You won't find quality like this at some sketchy breeder. 1.3276 0.03529 293 218 54 21
279 Way more reliable than an alarm clock. 1.3275 0.03572 284 211 53 20
280 PSST! Want a hot dog? 1.3274 0.03771 281 214 42 25
281 This motherfucker 1.3273 0.04128 278 222 21 35
282 They're spade, neutered, and non-binary. 1.3273 0.03689 275 206 48 21
283 My source? It was raining...you know...REALLY HARD... 1.3273 0.03689 275 206 48 21
284 You said you wanted the good stuff. 1.3272 0.03790 272 206 43 23
285 This is one of the few fur coats that’s actually endorsed by PETA. 1.3271 0.03710 269 201 48 20
286 These are fresh off the street! 1.3269 0.03461 309 231 55 23
287 It has a real fur lining. 1.3268 0.03822 254 190 45 19
288 I've learned that if I ask "Do you want a pet" without opening my coat, I get a much different response. 1.3265 0.03510 291 216 55 20
289 They're all pocket trained. 1.3262 0.03552 282 209 54 19
290 Buy one, get three more for free! 1.3259 0.03387 270 194 64 12
291 Women will start conversations with you! 1.3258 0.03833 264 200 42 22
292 To be a caption voter ‘influencer’, you need to name your weekly podcast something along the line of — ‘The New Yorker Caption Contest Podcast’. (Like Beth Lawler and Paul Nesja did.) 1.3251 0.03933 323 263 15 45
293 They’re knockoffs, but it’s impossible to tell them from the real thing. 1.3250 0.03531 280 207 55 18
294 I got all the antidepressants you need right here, pal 1.3248 0.03509 274 201 57 16
295 Do you prefer to scoop or bag? 1.3243 0.03519 259 188 58 13
296 Where else are you going to find unconditional love at these low prices? 1.3242 0.03631 256 188 53 15
297 Being a cat burglar is just a cover for my dog burgling operation. 1.3239 0.03977 247 188 38 21
298 A guaranteed pal for life, Theirs, not yours. 1.3238 0.03484 281 207 57 17
299 I used to be just a cat burglar, but I've decided to expand my skill set. 1.3235 0.03711 272 205 46 21
300 Five bucks apiece, and I’ll give you $25 if you take them all. 1.3229 0.03730 288 221 41 26
301 Also known as a Pee Coat. 1.3228 0.03624 285 215 48 22
302 Check out my cat-alog! 1.3227 0.03805 251 188 45 18
303 Addictive? Sure, but legal. 1.3225 0.03599 276 206 51 19
304 Buy one, you get a second one for 50% off. If you want all four, they're free! 1.3223 0.03663 273 205 48 20
305 I know what you're thinking. How much is that doggie in the raincoat. 1.3223 0.03474 273 200 58 15
306 Pssst....you want love and companionship, forget about eHarmony 1.3221 0.03208 298 215 70 13
307 We take venmo, bitcoin or legal tender vittles. 1.3221 0.03795 267 203 42 22
308 Am I licensed? No, but I’m cheaper than therapy. 1.3219 0.03392 292 215 60 17
309 I got woofers, mutts, some high-grade tabby, I even got some primo corgi but it will cost ya. 1.3217 0.03850 258 196 41 21
310 And each one is wearing a Rolex! 1.3217 0.03475 286 212 56 18
311 I used to be a meth mule, but now I'm a dealer for the SPCA. 1.3216 0.03353 283 206 63 14
312 Each one comes with a free watch. 1.3216 0.03570 283 212 51 20
313 They come in Snookums Wookums, Who’s A Good Boy?, Daddy Just Wuvs You, and Steve. 1.3213 0.03731 277 211 43 23
314 Meet 'Rolex', 'Gucci', 'Louis Vuitton', and 'Ray-Ban'. 1.3210 0.03642 271 203 49 19
315 Fresh from Florida. No vaccinations. 1.3208 0.03924 265 205 35 25
316 It's interesting when I close my coat 1.3204 0.03629 284 215 47 22
317 Unfortunately my chiropractor told me I can't sell Great Danes anymore. 1.3203 0.03586 281 211 50 20
318 The dachshunds are in my longer coat. 1.3197 0.03659 269 202 48 19
319 Pets? I prefer to call them babe magnets. 1.3197 0.03413 244 174 62 8
320 Which one's the good boy? 1.3193 0.03807 238 177 46 15
321 . no, no, I pay you to take them. 1.3187 0.03693 273 207 45 21
322 I was promised pussy. What the hell is this? 1.3182 0.03967 264 206 32 26
323 I see you’re wearing slippers. 1.3180 0.03964 261 203 33 25
324 It's real fur. 1.3170 0.03534 265 196 54 15
325 Sure they're cheap knock-offs, but they bark and meow just the same. 1.3168 0.03761 262 199 43 20
326 My days have been brighter since I’ve switched from fake Rolexes. 1.3167 0.03492 240 173 58 9
327 Guaranteed to take a de-ticking and keep on licking. 1.3162 0.03854 253 193 40 20
328 The first one is free! 1.3162 0.03698 272 207 44 21
329 Where else you gonna get unconditional love at this price? 1.3158 0.03659 247 183 50 14
330 Your choice—pick of the litter! 1.3158 0.03441 266 195 58 13
331 Hey buddy, wanna buy snuggled goods? 1.3156 0.03748 263 200 43 20
332 You know what this kind of love would cost you on Broadway? 1.3156 0.03868 244 185 41 18
333 Would you like to buy some guaranteed Instagram likes, cheap? 1.3152 0.03431 257 187 59 11
334 Hey sailor, looking for love? 1.3148 0.03640 270 204 47 19
335 All my coats are fur-lined. 1.3147 0.03912 232 175 41 16
336 What did you think I was going to show you? 1.3140 0.03757 258 196 43 19
337 And it is legal everywhere but South Carolina and Florida. 1.3138 0.03876 239 181 41 17
338 Take them all and I will pay you one hundred dollars. 1.3138 0.03921 239 182 39 18
339 Unconditional love guarantee. 1.3138 0.03738 239 178 47 14
340 Special offer today -- buy one, get one flea.' 1.3137 0.03705 255 192 46 17
341 For a hundred bucks I will not deliver one to your house. 1.3135 0.03941 252 195 35 22
342 And check out the fur lining. 1.3133 0.03590 249 184 52 13
343 Take 'em all and I'll throw in the coat. 1.3132 0.03567 265 198 51 16
344 This one is a rescue, but she purrs like she's brand new. 1.3127 0.03581 259 193 51 15
345 You know, if you're animal control, you have to tell me. 1.3121 0.03490 282 212 52 18
346 First one's FREE, kid! 1.3120 0.03595 266 200 49 17
347 Of course your money can buy happiness 1.3114 0.03568 289 221 46 22
348 One lick and you're hooked. 1.3111 0.03785 225 167 46 12
349 Of course these are all locally sourced. 1.3109 0.03812 267 207 37 23
350 Pick a pocket. 1.3101 0.03456 258 190 56 12
351 Not interested in a pet? How about an unused caption? I've got dozens of New Yorker captions. 1.3099 0.03923 242 186 37 19
352 If you buy two I'll throw in a watch. 1.3099 0.03508 242 177 55 10
353 These are all genuine, except for the copycats. 1.3096 0.03776 239 180 44 15
354 I'm telling you, this stuff is uncut, 100% purebred. 1.3092 0.03885 249 192 37 20
355 And their fathers are all from good nighborhoods. 1.3092 0.03707 262 200 43 19
356 Need any emotional therapy? 1.3089 0.03614 259 195 48 16
357 like crack, but kinder! 1.3088 0.03534 272 205 50 17
358 No side effects, just an overwhelming feeling of fluffiness. 1.3084 0.03809 227 170 44 13
359 It's a PETA parka. 1.3083 0.03629 253 190 48 15
360 Take all 4 and I’ll throw in the coat 1.3083 0.03467 266 198 54 14
361 Oui Monsieur! These are genuine strays. Never seen the inside of a pet shop. 1.3083 0.03666 266 203 44 19
362 Guaranteed to help you pick up chicks 1.3080 0.03601 237 175 51 11
363 Everything is 100% domestic. 1.3077 0.03561 273 207 48 18
364 Technically, all pets are stolen. 1.3077 0.03982 221 168 38 15
365 It's an ethical fur lining." 1.3077 0.03764 260 200 40 20
366 From the finest neighborhoods 1.3074 0.03431 270 201 55 14
367 Take your pick, I've got a sofa scratcher, a biter, a car-chaser and a moaning meower. 1.3071 0.03749 241 182 44 15
368 Can't show you the other side yet. They're nocturnal. 1.3060 0.03748 232 174 45 13
369 They’re not physically addictive and totally legal. 1.3057 0.03670 265 203 43 19
370 psst. hey, buddy. You wanna buy a watchdog? 1.3056 0.03803 252 194 39 19
371 What kind of flea market were you expecting? 1.3056 0.04094 216 166 34 16
372 These are a few of my favorite things. 1.3054 0.03904 239 184 37 18
373 No, not stolen, my friend — strayed! 1.3052 0.03662 249 188 46 15
374 Guaranteed to decrease your blood pressure, cholesterol & triglyceride levels, feelings of loneliness, anxiety, and symptoms of PTSD. 1.3051 0.03751 236 178 44 14
375 I just happened to be wearing this coat last week when it was raining cats and dogs. 1.3049 0.03847 223 168 42 13
376 Half price for the grumpy one. 1.3049 0.03847 223 168 42 13
377 It's more ethical than buying a chinchilla coat. These little guys are still alive. 1.3047 0.03927 233 179 37 17
378 You look like a man who makes impulsive decisions. 1.3038 0.03832 237 181 40 16
379 I got them in the last rainstorm. Yes, I always thought it was just an expression, too. 1.3034 0.03959 234 181 35 18
380 Hey buddy, ya wanna buy a fur-lined coat? 1.3029 0.03693 241 182 45 14
381 They take a licking and keep on ticking too. 1.3028 0.03680 251 191 44 16
382 They’re not stolen. They’re rescued. From a pet store. 1.3024 0.03576 248 186 49 13
383 Of course they're trench coat broken. 1.3024 0.03621 248 187 47 14
384 Of course they're genuine. 1.3021 0.03607 235 175 49 11
385 If you call it an 'emotional support coat', they waive the coat check fee. 1.3017 0.03772 242 185 41 16
386 You want Molly, Snow, Mary Jane or Angel? 1.3014 0.04181 209 162 31 16
387 Shopping, adopting... call it what you want to call it. I call it 2 for $20. 1.3014 0.04181 209 162 31 16
388 Today I have the ultimate in antidepressants. 1.3013 0.03870 229 175 39 15
389 Trust me. No one will be able to tell them from those high-priced designer purebreds!" 1.3012 0.03784 249 192 39 18
390 I have chipmunks in my legs. 1.3004 0.04140 223 175 29 19
391 Lonely? 1.3004 0.03655 253 193 44 16
392 I got your cat, your dog, your cat that thinks it's a dog, and your dog that sings Verdi and quotes Shakespeare... er, no charge for that one. 1.3000 0.03856 230 176 39 15
393 "It depends on what you mean by housebroken. 1.2996 0.03680 237 179 45 13
394 Could you use some extra responsibilities right now? 1.2992 0.03415 244 180 55 9
395 I got them during the last rain. 1.2991 0.03874 224 171 39 14
396 I can’t help it, I’m a petaphile. 1.2991 0.03925 224 172 37 15
397 Need some unconditional love? 1.2988 0.03684 241 183 44 14
398 The coat is fur-lined. 1.2987 0.03742 231 175 43 13
399 It was raining 1.2987 0.03841 231 177 39 15
400 You won't find these puppies anywhere else 1.2986 0.04201 211 165 29 17
401 Hey, want to buy some emotional support? 1.2984 0.04328 191 148 29 14
402 If you're animal control, you have to tell me. 1.2983 0.04164 238 191 23 24
403 And our special lining keeps you warm, both literally and figuratively. 1.2979 0.03794 235 180 40 15
404 Trust me, she will put a cheap watch into her dresser draw and it and you will soon be forgotten; however..... 1.2979 0.03889 235 182 36 17
405 Hey, buddy! Want some companionship? 1.2978 0.03859 225 172 39 14
406 Don't ask where I keep the gerbils. 1.2974 0.03875 232 179 37 16
407 Check out my new Furberry trenchcoat. 1.2969 0.03760 229 174 42 13
408 ...and over here are the uppers. 1.2966 0.03683 236 179 44 13
409 Just think, 12 years from now you could have the saddest day of your life 1.2965 0.04512 172 133 27 12
410 Of course money can buy love. 1.2963 0.03966 216 166 36 14
411 It’s really quite easy: with all this rain, I catch them falling from the sky. 1.2958 0.03687 240 183 43 14
412 Starter kits for your pet project. 1.2957 0.03796 230 176 40 14
413 They're free range. 1.2956 0.04080 203 156 34 13
414 Want a little tail? 1.2952 0.04098 210 163 32 15
415 Boy I tell ya I am sure gonna miss her scratchy little tongue licking my armpit. 1.2949 0.03895 217 166 38 13
416 This one right here is hypoallergenic, doesn’t shed, and with proper training, can distract your wife while that new big screen TV is delivered this fall for football season. 1.2949 0.03600 234 176 47 11
417 My life choices? At least I left the house wearing shoes. 1.2946 0.04114 224 177 28 19
418 Can I interest you in some…long-term commitment? 1.2946 0.03863 224 172 38 14
419 No worries, trust me-the cats in the bag. 1.2944 0.03732 231 176 42 13
420 I have some full-size in my van around the back 1.2939 0.03660 228 172 45 11
421 If cute ain't your thing, I got reptiles in the other side. 1.2939 0.03964 228 178 33 17
422 Can I interest you in a HOT dog? 1.2938 0.03911 211 161 38 12
423 Of course they’re all rescues. What do I look like? 1.2931 0.03511 232 173 50 9
424 This is my “it’s raining cats and dogs” raincoat. 1.2928 0.03935 222 172 35 15
425 They'll wake you up at 4:45am every morning, guaranteed. 1.2926 0.03900 229 178 35 16
426 I rescued them when they were raining 1.2922 0.03971 219 170 34 15
427 They’re not for sale, I just wanted to show you 1.2922 0.04024 219 171 32 16
428 It was raining cats and dogs so I took advantage if it 1.2918 0.03639 257 199 41 17
429 If you take two of them, I'll throw in a Rolex watch. 1.2917 0.03788 216 164 41 11
430 It’s two fur one 1.2915 0.03653 223 168 45 10
431 I got something here that'll make you feel good really fast. 1.2913 0.03786 230 177 39 14
432 Wanna buy some pussy? 1.2911 0.04155 213 168 28 17
433 They ain’t Rolexes, but they let you know EXACTLY when it’s time to be fed. 1.2911 0.04260 213 170 24 19
434 Cheaper than marrying and raising a teenager. 1.2909 0.03511 220 163 50 7
435 I couldn’t leave them at home alone! 1.2908 0.04293 196 154 27 15
436 Wanna buy a positive change facilitator? 1.2905 0.03617 241 184 44 13
437 Genuine reproductions! 1.2903 0.03992 217 169 33 15
438 Yeah, I caught them when it was raining the other day. 1.2903 0.04045 217 170 31 16
439 I keep the hamsters in my pants. 1.2903 0.04201 217 173 25 19
440 Have annoying neighbors? This one barks 24 hours a day! 1.2900 0.03721 231 177 41 13
441 Would you like to round up today's purchase to benefit a local pet charity? 1.2892 0.03929 204 156 37 11
442 Four times the emotional support and get the coat for free! 1.2890 0.03976 218 170 33 15
443 Stolen??? Only my heart! 1.2884 0.03904 215 166 36 13
444 These are the real thing. 1.2880 0.03477 250 190 48 12
445 Fur sale. 1.2878 0.03973 205 158 35 12
446 Yes, only their heads and front paws... 1.2870 0.03997 216 169 32 15
447 How hard was it raining? Just look! 1.2870 0.03832 216 166 38 12
448 Twenty bucks a cuddle and fifty for a frolic. 1.2870 0.03888 216 167 36 13
449 I call this one 'Rolex' and this is 'Cartier', 'Omega' and 'Citizen'. 1.2870 0.03776 216 165 40 11
450 Now this is a real warmup suit 1.2870 0.03857 223 173 36 14
451 Sure I can get you more. It’s raining them! 1.2869 0.03600 237 181 44 12
452 Comes complete with ‘Can We Keep Him?’ speech for mom and dad. 1.2865 0.04087 192 148 33 11
453 So, buy 2 and I throw in a watch! 1.2864 0.03956 206 159 35 12
454 If you don't see anything you like, I also have snakes in my underpants. 1.2864 0.03980 213 166 33 14
455 Come on touch it, it’s real fur. 1.2864 0.03867 213 164 37 12
456 Hey, emotional support don’t come cheap! 1.2864 0.03891 220 171 35 14
457 The cats are free if you buy the dog. 1.2864 0.03838 220 170 37 13
458 This coat comes with four portable heating units! 1.2864 0.03838 220 170 37 13
459 Meet Tiffany, Gucci, Calvin Klein, and Anne Klein 1.2857 0.03994 203 157 34 12
460 You won't find this coat in stores. That's real pet fur lining. 1.2857 0.03872 217 168 36 13
461 All of them are pocket-trained! 1.2857 0.03844 210 161 38 11
462 Meet Swatch, Rolex, Timex and Rover. 1.2851 0.03637 228 174 43 11
463 Got 'em one day it was raining hard as . . . 1.2851 0.03981 221 174 31 16
464 You can't go wrong pal, they're chic magnets. 1.2851 0.03822 221 171 37 13
465 Sweet new travel hack....emotional support pocket protectors. 1.2850 0.04057 207 162 31 14
466 Pssst, hey Buddy,want instant happiness? 1.2850 0.04216 200 158 27 15
467 This here, is what you call a fur lining. 1.2844 0.03929 225 177 32 16
468 It really helps with the separation anxiety now that I carry them in my pockets! 1.2844 0.04018 218 172 30 16
469 12 months and you got yourself a full size pet. 1.2843 0.03945 197 151 36 10
470 You looking for someone warm to cuddle with? 1.2842 0.03756 190 142 42 6
471 Gucci?...I've got something even better. Genuine Poochie. 1.2838 0.03728 229 177 39 13
472 Of course I have Molly, she's this one with the wet nose. 1.2838 0.03913 222 174 33 15
473 And if you get two, you'd be getting many, many more! 1.2832 0.04110 226 182 24 20
474 I'll be going back to watches. Getting too attached to sell these. 1.2832 0.03760 226 175 38 13
475 One-time purchase, no hidden fleas. 1.2824 0.03706 216 165 41 10
476 I’ve got hypoallergenic too 1.2819 0.03586 227 173 44 10
477 I've got anything you could want! Roofies, Angel-Dust, Snowball, Mittens, Snoopy, Fuzzball, Miss Puss, Toto, Bow-Wow... 1.2816 0.04003 206 161 32 13
478 Guaranteed not to ruin the furniture. Would I lie? 1.2814 0.03845 199 152 38 9
479 Their YouTube video is going feral. 1.2812 0.04204 192 151 28 13
480 More of a lizard guy? Let me get my other coat. 1.2808 0.04042 203 159 31 13
481 Or you could walk out of here with one of these puppies. 1.2806 0.03881 196 150 37 9
482 Since you asked, yeah I used to work at the SPCA, but I was fired for stealing office supplies. 1.2802 0.03834 232 183 33 16
483 Yes, they're pocket-trained. 1.2798 0.03953 218 172 31 15
484 One of these and you’ll be up all night. 1.2796 0.03815 211 163 37 11
485 They’re pure bred and pocket trained. 1.2793 0.03631 222 170 42 10
486 Get’em while they’re little nice and cuddly. 1.2789 0.03739 190 143 41 6
487 Check out these babies! 1.2788 0.03800 226 177 35 14
488 I used to get arrested when I offered strangers the chance to stroke my furry friend but thankfully, the laws have become more lax. 1.2788 0.03902 226 179 31 16
489 Guaranteed and certified, will love you despite your sins and transgressions. 1.2787 0.03827 183 138 39 6
490 The guy who wore slippers to a drug deal is trying to shame me for bringing my emotional support animals? You’re a joke. 1.2784 0.04292 194 155 24 15
491 Yeah, and if you take all four, I'll throw in a genuine Rolex. 1.2780 0.03834 223 175 34 14
492 You're in luck! I just restocked after yesterday's rain. 1.2778 0.03808 216 168 36 12
493 Never vaccinated! 1.2775 0.03952 209 164 32 13
494 Hey, buddy, wanna buy a watchdog? Something from the cat-alog? 1.2775 0.04008 191 148 33 10
495 And they're all pocket-trained! 1.2775 0.04209 191 151 27 13
496 I got your mood elevator right here pal. 1.2775 0.04076 191 149 31 11
497 They aren't for sale...but aren't they so cute?! 1.2775 0.04274 191 152 25 14
498 The proceeds go to George Santos's reelection. 1.2773 0.04178 220 179 21 20
499 Each comes with a Sarah McLachlan CD. 1.2772 0.04225 202 162 24 16
500 Five bucks each. Or, ten for the whole raincoat. 1.2769 0.03951 195 151 34 10
501 Ya' wanna buy a dust bunny generator? 1.2769 0.04272 195 156 24 15
502 Think of it as an investment for lifelong Instagram likes 1.2769 0.04017 195 152 32 11
503 Nah,they aren’t for sale. I just wanted you to see how cute they were. 1.2768 0.04513 177 142 21 14
504 You look like you need a watch dog. 1.2767 0.03990 206 162 31 13
505 John, stopped again by the neighborhood petophile 1.2765 0.03958 217 172 30 15
506 Get 'em now before the next pandemic 1.2763 0.03667 228 177 39 12
507 Did I mention there's a reward out for each one?" 1.2762 0.04369 181 144 24 13
508 It'll help you recover from Succession. 1.2759 0.03843 203 157 36 10
509 Pot? No, pets. 1.2757 0.03868 185 141 37 7
510 The endorphins alone are worth the investment. 1.2752 0.03995 218 174 28 16
511 when pets are outlawed, only outlaws will have pets. 1.2751 0.04099 189 148 30 11
512 Of course! Even the cats are part doodle. 1.2751 0.03959 189 146 34 9
513 Sorry, I ran out of watches. 1.2744 0.03811 215 168 35 12
514 I used to sell tropical fish. 1.2743 0.04086 175 135 32 8
515 When it rains, it purrs! 1.2742 0.04347 186 149 23 14
516 Mimi is a purebred and Baxter comes with an emotional support animal certificate 1.2742 0.03925 186 143 35 8
517 They look just like purebreds. Noone can tell the difference. 1.2741 0.04046 197 155 30 12
518 They'll keep your feet warmer than those lousy slippers." 1.2741 0.03981 197 154 32 11
519 The first ones free…so is the second, third, and fourth…please. 1.2741 0.03712 197 150 40 7
520 Just picked these guys up after last night’s storm. 1.2740 0.03872 219 173 32 14
521 I swear they tell time 1.2737 0.04147 190 150 28 12
522 You can't get these on Amazon. 1.2736 0.03862 201 156 35 10
523 You can tell all your friends it's a rescue. 1.2736 0.03862 201 156 35 10
524 This coat’s great when it’s raining cats and dogs. 1.2733 0.04225 161 124 30 7
525 And your contribution to George Santos’ Animal Advocacy is tax deductible. 1.2732 0.03994 205 162 30 13
526 And I have gerbils in the rear! 1.2731 0.03907 216 171 31 14
527 They're out of stock at Amazon. 1.2731 0.03851 216 170 33 13
528 It was raining cats and dogs! 1.2727 0.03562 242 189 40 13
529 And each pet comes unethically sourced from unreliable breeders. 1.2727 0.04122 187 147 29 11
530 Can I interest you in some chick magnets? 1.2727 0.03880 209 164 33 12
531 Watches are not selling very well these days. 1.2727 0.03997 209 166 29 14
532 Did you forget a birthday? 1.2723 0.04061 191 150 30 11
533 Eightball?? I thought you said Furball 1.2722 0.04081 180 140 31 9
534 Looking for someone to talk to, to walk and sleep with? 1.2719 0.03655 228 178 38 12
535 C'mon, man! You don't want a Rolex. A Rolex would never eat its own barf , lick your face, and then step on your pillow. 1.2713 0.04102 188 148 29 11
536 I tell ya, you can make MILLIONS with these in online videos... 1.2709 0.03891 203 159 33 11
537 What, you never heard of a cat burglar? 1.2709 0.03699 203 156 39 8
538 How about this genuine gold watchdog? 1.2709 0.04015 203 161 29 13
539 Yeah, they're all AKC-registered Rhodesian Ridgebacks, guaranteed 1.2708 0.03905 192 149 34 9
540 The cats are free but you have to buy a dog to get one! 1.2705 0.03651 207 159 40 8
541 Hey, I'll give you my best deal on this creepy work of a New Yorker cartoonist! 1.2704 0.04239 196 158 23 15
542 You can’t say no to these. 1.2703 0.03662 222 173 38 11
543 Would you like to see something more endangered? 1.2701 0.03789 211 165 35 11
544 There are more where these came from. 1.2701 0.03668 211 163 39 9
545 What did you think I said? 1.2700 0.04054 200 159 28 13
546 No. Just cats and dogs. Hamsters and turtles next week. 1.2697 0.04329 178 142 24 12
547 Meet Louis, Rolex, Ray-Ban, and Gucci. 1.2696 0.04116 204 164 25 15
548 Between John, Paul, George, and Ringo here, you’ve got the pick of the litter. 1.2694 0.04220 193 155 24 14
549 No, just the heads. 1.2690 0.04031 197 156 29 12
550 Buy it quickly before Trump grabs it. 1.2689 0.04376 212 177 13 22
551 Son, these are the new lady magnets. 1.2689 0.03713 212 165 37 10
552 They tell time. 1.2687 0.04036 201 160 28 13
553 ...and way outclasses pigs in a blanket... 1.2687 0.03974 201 159 30 12
554 Okay, they're a little warm. 1.2686 0.04226 175 138 27 10
555 Never too soon to get prepared for the next pandemic! 1.2682 0.03563 220 170 41 9
556 In “Barbieland”, even the drug dealers peddle cute puppies and kittens! 1.2682 0.04234 179 142 26 11
557 And I'll throw in a watch for free 1.2679 0.04261 168 132 27 9
558 Pocket Pets...the next big thing! 1.2678 0.03792 183 140 37 6
559 No, no...the dogs and cats are mine. I'm selling the coat. 1.2674 0.04111 172 134 30 8
560 They're technically rescues because you're rescuing them from me. 1.2673 0.03765 202 157 36 9
561 Can't say "Psst". It spooks the kittens. 1.2670 0.04205 176 139 27 10
562 You should see where I keep the gerbils. 1.2670 0.04179 191 153 25 13
563 Yep, that's right... unconditionally. 1.2670 0.04113 191 152 27 12
564 Get yer' hot dogs! 1.2667 0.04395 165 131 24 10
565 $100 for one; all four are free! 1.2663 0.04003 184 144 31 9
566 First one's free. Then you gotta beg. 1.2663 0.04003 184 144 31 9
567 Wanna buy new furniture? 1.2661 0.03835 233 188 28 17
568 A puppy for a yuppy? Or are you smitten with a kitten 1.2660 0.03798 188 145 36 7
569 I’m all out of watches. 1.2660 0.03872 188 146 34 8
570 Of course they're hot, they're in my coat. 1.2660 0.04086 188 149 28 11
571 The only thing illegal here is how cute these little fellows are. 1.2659 0.04090 173 135 30 8
572 The puppies are positioned so the cats can be kitty-corner. 1.2659 0.03835 173 132 36 5
573 Help me put my daughter through College by buying one of her pets. 1.2659 0.04482 173 140 20 13
574 Psst! Mister! Wanna buy a hot dog? 1.2657 0.04005 207 166 27 14
575 The dogs are hot, the cats are cool. 1.2657 0.03825 207 163 33 11
576 They will never unfriend you. 1.2655 0.04106 177 139 29 9
577 I'd keep them myself but I don't pet my own supply. 1.2652 0.04337 181 146 22 13
578 Know what caption finalists — Beth Lawler and Paul Nesja know: You can see how each of your caption entries were ranked (and the types of votes they received), at the following address — https://nextml.github.io/caption-contest-data/ 1.2650 0.04620 200 170 7 23
579 Now, if you’re looking for the purebred stuff… 1.2649 0.04199 185 148 25 12
580 Chick bait! Take your pick! 1.2647 0.03860 204 161 32 11
581 All house trained. I guarantee it. 1.2647 0.03962 170 131 33 6
582 I have cute or criminal, take your pick 1.2646 0.04136 189 151 26 12
583 Welcome to my paw shop 1.2642 0.03729 193 149 37 7
584 Rescue is a broad term. 1.2640 0.03749 197 153 36 8
585 These adorable fur balls are free! 1.2637 0.04172 182 145 26 11
586 Gerbils? Hold on, I'll go get my other jacket. 1.2637 0.04385 182 148 20 14
587 Will that be pick up or takeout? 1.2637 0.04244 182 146 24 12
588 Can I interest you in the world's most ethical fur coat? 1.2634 0.04248 186 150 23 13
589 Today only, buy one get one free. 1.2626 0.03867 198 156 32 10
590 "Psst... Wanna buy some cheap unconditional love?" 1.2626 0.04065 179 141 29 9
591 Hey buddy, need a pick-me-up? 1.2623 0.03852 183 142 34 7
592 You don’t even need to wind them up. 1.2623 0.04079 183 145 28 10
593 You look like a man in need of a best friend, friend. 1.2621 0.03827 206 163 32 11
594 They won’t take no for an answer. 1.2616 0.03652 172 130 39 3
595 Supply chain problem with watches 1.2616 0.04091 172 135 29 8
596 No pressure—you look like you could use a friend. 1.2615 0.03904 195 154 31 10
597 Guaranteed you'll regret it dearly in the morning 1.2611 0.04155 157 122 29 6
598 By the hour..or the whole night… 1.2609 0.04059 184 146 28 10
599 This one's name is Rolex. 1.2609 0.03755 184 142 36 6
600 Sorry, I'm all out of French Bulldogs. 1.2609 0.03621 207 161 38 8
601 Two are a little ruff, but the others keep purfect time. 1.2609 0.04059 184 146 28 10
602 Counterfeit? No, this is 100-percent British Shorthair! 1.2607 0.03700 211 166 35 10
603 It keeps you warm AND cuddly. 1.2606 0.03927 188 148 31 9
604 And for the right price, we can get the application, personal references and home inspection done today. 1.2606 0.04070 188 150 27 11
605 It was raining cats and dogs, so I figured why not? 1.2604 0.04144 192 155 24 13
606 One or all of these will look cool on Facebook. 1.2600 0.03898 200 159 30 11
607 Wanna get high on dopamine? 1.2594 0.03804 212 169 31 12
608 They may be knock-offs, but I promise when you smell their poop you won’t be able to tell the difference 1.2593 0.04159 162 127 28 7
609 Yeah- I had to pivot- the counterfeit watches just weren’t selling anymore 1.2593 0.03970 162 125 32 5
610 Hey, pal, why settle for online cuteness? I've got the real thing right here! 1.2586 0.04131 174 138 27 9
611 House trained? My friend, they're pocket trained. 1.2586 0.03795 174 134 35 5
612 You’re single? The first cat’s free. 1.2586 0.04289 174 140 23 11
613 It was one of those rains when it pours 1.2585 0.03502 205 158 41 6
614 They prefer to live in a household with granite countertops and a curated space for their conquests. 1.2584 0.03988 178 140 30 8
615 Now , wanna see me pull a rabbit out of my hat ? 1.2584 0.04067 178 141 28 9
616 They're a steal, but they might need to be fixed. 1.2582 0.03851 182 142 33 7
617 And I have a Great Dane in my other jacket. 1.2582 0.04227 182 147 23 12
618 Nobody will ever know they're not purebred. 1.2582 0.03929 182 143 31 8
619 Even an expert can’t tell these from the real ones 1.2581 0.03873 186 146 32 8
620 Puppies and kitties are guaranteed to get you phone numbers! 1.2581 0.03873 186 146 32 8
621 Furlined! 1.2579 0.03962 190 151 29 10
622 Sure, they’re addictive. Isn’t that the point? 1.2579 0.04167 190 154 23 13
623 And best of all, there's no winding or batteries required. 1.2577 0.03906 194 154 30 10
624 This one comes with retractable blades. 1.2577 0.04316 163 130 24 9
625 Take all four, and I’ll throw in the housecoat. 1.2573 0.04175 171 136 26 9
626 Puppers are uppers. 1.2573 0.04257 171 137 24 10
627 Of course they're genuine. This one's Rolex; she's Cartier; that's Patek; and he's Philippe. 1.2571 0.03777 175 135 35 5
628 So you wanna fill the void, eh? 1.2571 0.04110 175 139 27 9
629 Of course, you’ll need to pass the customary adoption background check. 1.2570 0.04273 179 145 22 12
630 They’re already wound up. 1.2568 0.03986 183 145 29 9
631 And this cat will talk when he gets your tongue. 1.2568 0.03910 183 144 31 8
632 They'll make all that go away, and you can feel the way you uset'a feel. 1.2568 0.04134 183 147 25 11
633 I’m a pet-sitter, but I sublet. 1.2568 0.04277 183 149 21 13
634 Highest quality - no Shih Tzu. 1.2567 0.03855 187 147 32 8
635 …for the vegan that still wants to experience the luxury of a genuine fur-lined winter coat. 1.2567 0.03702 187 145 36 6
636 Perfect when you’ve forgotten your child’s B-Day and you are also mad at your wife! 1.2567 0.03928 187 148 30 9
637 You said you need some hugs? 1.2564 0.04155 156 122 28 6
638 Get yourself some unconditional love, man! 1.2563 0.03890 160 123 33 4
639 The dogs are originals, the cats are copies. 1.2561 0.04378 164 132 22 10
640 This one comes with its own Instagram page. 1.2560 0.03869 168 130 33 5
641 They’re pocket pets 1.2559 0.03561 211 165 38 8
642 World's best addiction. 1.2557 0.04245 176 142 23 11
643 These things are so purebred they’re illegal in seven states. 1.2557 0.04089 176 140 27 9
644 If you buy all four, I'll throw in the coat for free. 1.2556 0.03949 180 142 30 8
645 Quite clean; I picked them up after a downpour. 1.2554 0.04041 184 147 27 10
646 Psst, hey buddy, lemme tell you about my new pet project. 1.2554 0.03892 184 145 31 8
647 Sure, you can tell people it’s a rescue. 1.2553 0.03910 188 149 30 9
648 Get 'em while they're fresh. 1.2552 0.03783 192 151 33 8
649 Can I interest you in a fur coat? 1.2547 0.03869 161 124 33 4
650 It's fur lined, kid! 1.2544 0.04364 169 137 21 11
651 And if you’re a Trump supporter, you can grab one for free. 1.2544 0.04199 169 135 25 9
652 Which would you like? Rolex? Philippe? Cartier? 1.2544 0.04028 169 133 29 7
653 I used to sell alarm clocks, but these work better. 1.2544 0.04282 169 136 23 10
654 Babe Magnets … looks like you could use a little magic and a new wardrobe! 1.2543 0.04050 173 137 28 8
655 $250 and they can be yours again 1.2542 0.04068 177 141 27 9
656 I guarantee, they are coat-trained 1.2542 0.04068 177 141 27 9
657 Sure, they come with papers-all kinds of papers. 1.2541 0.04007 181 144 28 9
658 I picked them up when it was raining cats and dogs. 1.2541 0.03930 181 143 30 8
659 Yeah, he comes with adoption papers and everything. Your wife won't know the difference! 1.2541 0.03930 181 143 30 8
660 If you take all four, I will throw in a weeks worth of free pet food and a Taylor Swift ticket. 1.2541 0.03718 185 144 35 6
661 THEY FIGHT LIKE ,WELL YOU KNOW..... 1.2541 0.03948 185 147 29 9
662 Wanna buy the next YouTube sensation? 1.2541 0.04094 185 149 25 11
663 The two on top are almost coat-broken! 1.2535 0.03832 213 172 28 13
664 Just as promised: Skunk, Cheese, Speed, and Snow. 1.2530 0.04496 166 136 18 12
665 It was raining so I just opened up my coat! 1.2530 0.03979 166 130 30 6
666 Good for losers to make instant friends 1.2530 0.04331 166 134 22 10
667 They're all "rescues" -- their owners were horrible people... 1.2529 0.04177 170 136 25 9
668 My other coat's lined with fish. Less warm but more waterproof. 1.2529 0.04093 170 135 27 8
669 This one comes with its own Instagram account! 1.2529 0.04093 170 135 27 8
670 Oh come on , you have heard of pocket protectors! 1.2529 0.04177 170 136 25 9
671 To the editor. This is a disgraceful cartoon. There is no funny caption one can write about puppies and kittens being sold in a dark alley, like illegal drugs. Especially with cruel puppy mills operating in the US and animal cruelty that goes with it 1.2528 0.04564 178 149 13 16
672 Do you want the codependency companions or the despair distractors? 1.2528 0.04126 178 143 25 10
673 The local dopamine dealer 1.2528 0.04048 178 142 27 9
674 Two kittens & two pups walk into a bar with you, you’ll never go home alone again. 1.2527 0.03987 182 145 28 9
675 Hot Dogs and Cool Cats! 1.2527 0.03910 182 144 30 8
676 You look like someone who needs a friend. 1.2527 0.03832 182 143 32 7
677 Nah, Rolexes are ‘out.’ ‘Cute’ is in.” 1.2527 0.04002 186 149 27 10
678 These are just the display models. 1.2526 0.03873 190 151 30 9
679 They are all raincoat trained. 1.2526 0.03873 190 151 30 9
680 The maltese is 100% pure, man. 1.2525 0.03912 202 163 27 12
681 It’s not an unethical scandal but rather a big, joyful open secret! 1.2516 0.04276 159 127 24 8
682 Just $25 for me and you can collect the reward! 1.2516 0.04276 159 127 24 8
683 They're locally sourced, right from this alley. 1.2515 0.04223 167 134 24 9
684 It rained yesterday. 1.2515 0.04472 167 137 18 12
685 Knockoff pets here. You can't tell the difference. 1.2515 0.04155 171 137 25 9
686 Yeah, they's housebroke. That's me you smell. 1.2514 0.04009 175 139 28 8
687 And each one is wearing a watch. 1.2514 0.03949 179 142 29 8
688 Go ahead, the first one's free! 1.2514 0.04189 183 149 22 12
689 What's it gonna take to put you into one of these bad boys?" 1.2514 0.03734 183 143 34 6
690 People are much more open to being flashed this way. 1.2513 0.03836 187 148 31 8
691 This one is hardly used. Carried everywhere by a little old lady”. 1.2513 0.03926 191 153 28 10
692 I have a concealed carry permit. 1.2513 0.04131 191 156 22 13
693 These are the genuine article, no knock offs. 1.2513 0.03732 195 154 33 8
694 Or, do you want a rabbit? 1.2500 0.03964 188 151 27 10
695 Meet Molly, Snowball, Juice, and Mary Jane. 1.2500 0.04484 148 119 21 8
696 ok. Now show me yours. 1.2500 0.04326 156 125 23 8
697 Perhaps I can interest you in a Roll-Rex? 1.2500 0.03716 184 144 34 6
698 Of course they're certified emotional support! 1.2500 0.03766 192 152 32 8
699 It's cheaper than being married with children. 1.2500 0.04448 168 138 18 12
700 Poodles are extra and I have to special order them. 1.2500 0.03790 172 134 33 5
701 This way you know it's real fur. 1.2500 0.04200 168 135 24 9
702 Trust me. They tell time. 1.2500 0.04381 148 118 23 7
703 I'm rebranding as a pop-up pet store. 1.2500 0.03790 172 134 33 5
704 Pssst…. need a fix? 1.2500 0.04174 188 154 21 13
705 If these aren’t to your liking I can pull a rabbit outta my hat 1.2500 0.04084 180 145 25 10
706 It's the latest in anti pickpocket apparel 1.2500 0.04105 188 153 23 12
707 If you prefer reptiles, I’ll open the other side of my coat. 1.2500 0.03892 188 150 29 9
708 Buy all four, and I'll throw in a hampster 1.2500 0.04215 172 139 23 10
709 No, no, I keep the coat! 1.2500 0.04050 172 137 27 8
710 Since climate change, I find them after every rainfall. 1.2500 0.03635 184 143 36 5
711 It’s okay. You’re adopting, not shopping. 1.2500 0.04367 168 137 20 11
712 I found them in a box left by a 'No Littering' sign. 1.2487 0.03890 193 155 28 10
713 And on this side I have all my available uppers. 1.2486 0.04139 181 147 23 11
714 and they all fell off the back of an animal control truck 1.2486 0.03910 181 144 29 8
715 It’s a tad scratchy but it’ll keep you warm 1.2486 0.03831 181 143 31 7
716 Wana buy a chic magnet? 1.2486 0.03945 173 137 29 7
717 I'll mail you the pedigree certificate. 1.2485 0.03733 169 131 34 4
718 I also have monkeys in the back. 1.2485 0.04069 165 131 27 7
719 No one will notice your sock slippers. 1.2484 0.04408 161 131 20 10
720 …. and I’ll even throw in a free lint brush. 1.2484 0.04107 157 124 27 6
721 Buy two and get two free 1.2484 0.03688 157 120 35 2
722 Wanna grap a pussy?! 1.2484 0.04844 153 128 12 13
723 Your ex would love one! 1.2475 0.03959 202 165 24 13
724 Wanna have some fun? 1.2474 0.03997 190 154 25 11
725 They also come in any collar you like. 1.2474 0.03782 190 151 31 8
726 If you take all four, I'll throw in the coat for free! 1.2472 0.03524 178 137 38 3
727 I call it, HAMANE TRAFFICKING. 1.2471 0.04250 174 142 21 11
728 It's for when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.2471 0.04071 170 136 26 8
729 Hey, buddy. You want to buy some love? 1.2471 0.04071 170 136 26 8
730 Check out my purr coat! 1.2470 0.04048 166 132 27 7
731 I've got models with very loud alarms and others that grow up to ignore you. 1.2469 0.04295 162 131 22 9
732 Listen, these are way easier to sell than those fake Rolexes! 1.2469 0.04113 162 129 26 7
733 You came to the right place on a lonely night. 1.2469 0.04205 162 130 24 8
734 The friend you always wanted. 1.2467 0.03893 150 116 31 3
735 The puppies are so cheap because I can get them from my supplier by the pound. 1.2466 0.04299 146 116 24 6
736 They are fresh from this morning's rain. 1.2460 0.03965 187 151 26 10
737 This is the perfect coat for those days when it’s raining cats and dogs. 1.2457 0.04150 175 142 23 10
738 Take two. They’re small. 1.2456 0.03964 171 136 28 7
739 Dating apps are for losers. This here's your hardcore chick bait. 1.2456 0.03964 171 136 28 7
740 Feel it. It's real fur. 1.2455 0.03935 167 132 29 6
741 You can sniff 'em, rub 'em, or just stare into their eyes to get a mind-blowing buzz. 1.2455 0.04201 167 135 23 9
742 They're free! I just get a little kickback whenever you post a photo of one of thesee cuties. 1.2455 0.04201 167 135 23 9
743 I wouldn’t say ‘hot’, more like warm and cuddly 1.2454 0.04182 163 131 24 8
744 Psst. Instagram starter pack? 1.2453 0.04158 159 127 25 7
745 Each one is ten bucks, and I'll throw in a Rolex 1.2450 0.04092 151 119 27 5
746 Ya, I can make more selling watches, but with dogs and cats I feel like I’m doing something good for the planet, 1.2450 0.04303 151 121 23 7
747 I was told it's unethical to sell fakes 1.2447 0.03799 188 150 30 8
748 Watch dogs and watch cats. 1.2447 0.03946 188 152 26 10
749 It was raining cats and dogs so I decided to make the best of it. 1.2446 0.03930 184 148 27 9
750 And there’s more where this came from… 1.2446 0.03853 184 147 29 8
751 This is top-of-the-line stuff, 100% pure bred 1.2444 0.03909 180 144 28 8
752 Can you believe it!!! I've discovered how to breed CATDOODLES! 1.2444 0.03747 180 142 32 6
753 For a small fee I'll let you see the hypoallergenic models on the other side. 1.2443 0.03885 176 140 29 7
754 Forget the Rolex, how about a fur coat? 1.2443 0.03801 176 139 31 6
755 They’re almost legal. It was only “pet”ty larceny. 1.2443 0.04128 176 143 23 10
756 Psst! The cat just psst. 1.2443 0.04049 176 142 25 9
757 Wanna buy a hot dog or a cool cat? 1.2442 0.03857 172 136 30 6
758 I can give you a deal on the whole kitt'n kapoodle. 1.2442 0.03857 172 136 30 6
759 People always ask me whether I’m a cat or a dog-person…this way, I don’t have to decide! 1.2437 0.04039 160 127 27 6
760 Hey, buddy, wanna buy a pet without a license? 1.2434 0.03706 189 150 32 7
761 C’mon, rub his belly. That’s real Golden. 1.2432 0.04137 148 117 26 5
762 Calico or cavapoo? Pick your poison. 1.2431 0.04045 181 147 24 10
763 Clean alley? Yes, I just picked up the litter. 1.2426 0.04240 169 138 21 10
764 For an extra dollar you can have the pick of the litter. 1.2420 0.04371 157 128 20 9
765 ‘’looks like you need a friend” 1.2419 0.03739 186 148 31 7
766 If you take all four, I'll throw in the coat, too. 1.2418 0.04252 153 123 23 7
767 How about a fur trade? 1.2418 0.04045 153 121 27 5
768 And let me tell you about my Rainy Day Special! 1.2418 0.04150 153 122 25 6
769 So, lemme get this straight. You didn't actually want to see me about a dog? 1.2418 0.04450 153 125 19 9
770 Strangest thing. They don’t think they’re people. They think they’re baby kangaroos. 1.2416 0.04086 178 145 23 10
771 In some states they can legally vote. 1.2414 0.03987 174 140 26 8
772 Naw, naw, these ain't hot -- just warm and cuddly! 1.2414 0.04184 145 115 25 5
773 The first lick is for free… 1.2414 0.04297 145 116 23 6
774 Two of these things are not like the others. 1.2410 0.04024 166 133 26 7
775 Pick a cat. Any cat. 1.2410 0.04114 166 134 24 8
776 I’m part marsupial. 1.2410 0.04288 166 136 20 10
777 Unfortunately none of these options are available with a silencer. 1.2407 0.04273 162 132 21 9
778 Guaranteed to chew those little puppies you have your feet in. 1.2406 0.03798 187 150 29 8
779 Do you think I'd carry them like this if they weren't house trained? 1.2405 0.04438 158 130 18 10
780 The first step to social media addiction… 1.2405 0.04059 158 126 26 6
781 Serotonin charge, no negative side effects, same addiction 1.2403 0.04327 154 125 21 8
782 Yes, they are coat broken. 1.2402 0.03744 179 142 31 6
783 For the co-op or condo that doesn't allow pets. 1.2400 0.04049 175 142 24 9
784 Can I interest you in a natural high? 1.2400 0.04129 175 143 22 10
785 I got purebreds, only purebreds. No mutts or rescues. 1.2400 0.04405 150 122 20 8
786 Fewer ticks than my old product line." 1.2398 0.04028 171 138 25 8
787 Going to be hard to pick just one! Take 2! Take 3! Or just take all 4! The addiction starts so simple!!! 1.2398 0.03763 171 135 31 5
788 I got 10 ounces of pure joy for ya right here! 1.2397 0.04380 146 118 21 7
789 Guaranteed ticktock stars right here. 1.2395 0.03818 167 132 30 5
790 Well, it was raining you know. 1.2394 0.03780 188 151 29 8
791 Young people today weren’t interested in a fake Rolex, so I went with some… real deals. 1.2393 0.03777 163 128 31 4
792 Wanna distract yourself from how lonely you are? 1.2393 0.03777 163 128 31 4
793 Watchdog? 1.2391 0.03675 184 146 32 6
794 The cats can't tell time, but the watchdogs can. 1.2387 0.04302 155 126 21 8
795 You wanna buy some pussy 1.2386 0.04108 176 144 22 10
796 Not who I thought I'd see selling pussy on the streets 1.2386 0.03947 176 142 26 8
797 It’s amazing what you can do by just posting a Craigslist ad offering pet sitting services. 1.2384 0.04378 151 123 20 8
798 You looking for uppers or downers? 1.2384 0.04172 151 121 24 6
799 They’re genuine. Not even fixed. 1.2384 0.04254 172 142 19 11
800 Cute, huh? And they'll love you when no one else does. 1.2381 0.04157 168 137 22 9
801 Do you want to see what is in the other side? 1.2381 0.04562 147 121 17 9
802 No AI. No Robo. You feed them They grow. They love you. 1.2381 0.04070 168 136 24 8
803 Oh no, I have fentanyl too. 1.2378 0.03966 185 151 24 10
804 Yeah, it's the ideal coat to wear when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.2378 0.04225 164 134 21 9
805 These dogs and cats have been genetically modified to like each other. If it works we're gonna try it on humans. 1.2376 0.03708 181 144 31 6
806 Hey, it ain't lyin' if you call it a rescue. 1.2374 0.04402 139 112 21 6
807 Pawruse for as long as you'd like! 1.2373 0.03844 177 142 28 7
808 Lookin' for unconditional love, bud? No Bipeds here. 1.2372 0.04179 156 126 23 7
809 And the coat works best when it’s raining cats and dogs… 1.2370 0.03986 173 140 25 8
810 Just think of the cute social media posts! You'll have so many subscribers, you won't know what to do! 1.2368 0.03931 152 120 28 4
811 I always find a bargain at the flea market. 1.2368 0.03890 190 155 25 10
812 Picked these up last time it was raining cats and dogs. 1.2368 0.04352 152 124 20 8
813 None of the addiction, all of the expense! 1.2367 0.04048 169 137 24 8
814 …and it has a genuine fur lining! 1.2366 0.03719 186 149 30 7
815 Don't feel so special with your "kangaroo" pocket now, do ya? 1.2364 0.04202 165 135 21 9
816 Everyone is pocket trained. 1.2364 0.04202 165 135 21 9
817 Hey, Pal. Whatchoo looking for? I got meows. I got woofs. I got freedom from big-box breeder guilt right here. 1.2362 0.03699 199 161 29 9
818 Barely used, only petted by a little old lady on Sundays. 1.2361 0.04406 144 117 20 7
819 Flash sale 1.2361 0.04406 144 117 20 7
820 This one licks your balls 1.2360 0.04537 161 135 14 12
821 Designer watches? So passé. But designer pets.. 1.2360 0.04087 161 130 24 7
822 Psssst...can't buy love? Don't believe it! 1.2360 0.04181 161 131 22 8
823 I got endorphins right here. 1.2357 0.04373 140 113 21 6
824 They are not Rolex's but they are not fake. 1.2357 0.04055 157 126 25 6
825 See! The kids never have to know. 1.2357 0.04252 157 128 21 8
826 I'd say from your bearing and attire that you are a cat person. 1.2357 0.03630 157 122 33 2
827 Guaranteed New York non-feral. 1.2356 0.03966 174 141 25 8
828 If you don't want any of these cuties, let me show you the fine collection of snakes in the other side of my coat. 1.2356 0.03881 174 140 27 7
829 See? I’m not a cop 1.2356 0.03522 174 136 35 3
830 Well of course they're addicting! Jeez buddy! 1.2353 0.04226 153 124 22 7
831 These pets are clearly happy in a small confined space. They will love your tiny excuse for a flat. 1.2353 0.04333 136 109 22 5
832 Grab one. When you're a star, they let you do it. 1.2353 0.04326 153 125 20 8
833 -- Did they fall off the back of truck? --No, they came down in the last shower. 1.2350 0.04133 183 152 19 12
834 Hey Buddy, don't be so judgemental, you're still wearing your slippers. 1.2349 0.04404 149 122 19 8
835 Give the gift that keeps on giving - a pregnant pet. 1.2349 0.04404 149 122 19 8
836 Yeah, I got Seiko, Apple, Rolex and Patek 1.2349 0.04193 149 120 23 6
837 Who needs a wife or a mother when you've got one of these? 1.2346 0.03806 179 144 28 7
838 Wanna buy a soiled trench coat? 1.2346 0.04158 162 132 22 8
839 Hey Buddy, you looking for a good time? 1.2346 0.04064 162 131 24 7
840 I got the idea when someone shouted "It's raining cats and dogs." by Janet Cordish, Cincinnati, Ohio 1.2343 0.04028 175 143 23 9
841 I tell you, they're just as good as real ones. 1.2342 0.04131 158 128 23 7
842 These are on the forgot your anniversary special 1.2342 0.04131 158 128 23 7
843 You like e'm with or with out stripes ? 1.2342 0.04032 158 127 25 6
844 And if this isn’t what you’re looking for, I’ve got some hamsters in the trunk. 1.2342 0.04131 158 128 23 7
845 Tabby is 40, Maine Coon is 60 1.2340 0.04227 141 113 23 5
846 I'll throw in the coat if you take all four 1.2339 0.04006 171 139 24 8
847 My wife's around the corner with the snakes. 1.2339 0.04006 171 139 24 8
848 I call them the four house pets of the apocalypse! 1.2338 0.04398 154 127 18 9
849 Hey, Buddy. Wanna feel good? 1.2336 0.04178 137 109 24 4
850 You weren't expecting to see pussy when I opened the robe. 1.2335 0.04156 167 137 21 9
851 Watches? Does anyone really know what time it is? 1.2335 0.03887 167 134 27 6
852 It was raining cats and dogs so I sheltered them. 1.2335 0.03793 167 133 29 5
853 Yes. I do have deep pockets. 1.2335 0.04156 167 137 21 9
854 Can I interest you in an idiom? 1.2335 0.03697 167 132 31 4
855 I used to be a flasher. I'm doing a lot better with these. 1.2333 0.04378 150 123 19 8
856 I’ma cat burger and a hot dog vendor. 1.2333 0.04578 150 125 15 10
857 I got the best prices. All my neighbors who bought Covid emotional support pets had to go back to work. 1.2333 0.04060 150 120 25 5
858 the fix you didn't know you need 1.2331 0.04225 163 134 20 9
859 They all got different meows and woofs. No, there is no silent mode. Nope, no airplane mode also. But these two have vibration mode and other two some waggly tale mode. 1.2331 0.04042 163 132 24 7
860 For an encore, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat. 1.2331 0.03750 163 129 30 4
861 Psst. Hey buddy. How'd ya like to buy an emotional support coat? 1.2331 0.04760 133 110 15 8
862 As you can see, the raincoat works best when it is raining cats and dogs. 1.2327 0.04204 159 130 21 8
863 I’ll tell you what. You buy all four and I’ll throw in a free rat. 1.2327 0.04204 159 130 21 8
864 And they all come with genuine Gucci collars. 1.2324 0.03636 185 148 31 6
865 Damnedest thing. It was raining 'em. 1.2323 0.04276 155 127 20 8
866 I finally found a product Amazon doesn’t sell, and, I have a faster delivery than they do! 1.2323 0.03971 155 124 26 5
867 The endorphin buzz from this one is like, whoah... 1.2323 0.04075 155 125 24 6
868 No, no, no — that's just the breed's name. Nothing to worry about. Really. Armenian Toddler Shredder Terriers are some of the sweetest dogs there are. And whenever they aren't, it's the owner's fault. 1.2320 0.04005 181 149 22 10
869 My tailor’s got a marsupial fetish 1.2319 0.04022 138 109 26 3
870 I'll throw in a free watch with every purchase! 1.2319 0.04277 138 111 22 5
871 As you can smell, they are all guaranteed house broken. 1.2319 0.04151 138 110 24 4
872 I only have ecstasy on me today 1.2319 0.04022 138 109 26 3
873 Buy all four and I'll throw in the coat. 1.2318 0.04144 151 122 23 6
874 They are already pocket-trained! 1.2317 0.03829 164 131 28 5
875 Maybe this will help you relax. 1.2317 0.03926 164 132 26 6
876 Pick one or they go into the shelter. 1.2313 0.04484 134 109 19 6
877 I got walking buddies or lap blankets today. What’ll it be? 1.2313 0.04226 134 107 23 4
878 How about some wathes...oh,wait this is my daughter's raincoat. 1.2313 0.04324 147 120 20 7
879 Authentic, not cloned 1.2312 0.03785 160 127 29 4
880 They fell off a truck. 1.2312 0.03987 160 129 25 6
881 Yeah ... I ran out of fake Rolexes. 1.2312 0.03701 173 138 30 5
882 One of these stuffed animals with go perfectly with your pajamas. 1.2308 0.04052 156 126 24 6
883 You looking for a sense of purpose? 1.2308 0.04152 156 127 22 7
884 I only wear this one when it's really raining hard!" 1.2308 0.03931 143 113 27 3
885 This litter is the Rolex of cats and dogs. 1.2308 0.03846 169 136 27 6
886 Hey, need a pocket for your pet? 1.2303 0.03718 178 143 29 6
887 I used to sell Rolex watches, but there was too much competition. 1.2303 0.03998 165 134 24 7
888 You can make America great. You can pet the puppies. You can NOT grab the pussies! 1.2303 0.04618 152 128 13 11
889 Change your life, special today only, buy one get one free. 1.2298 0.04062 161 131 23 7
890 Your kids will never know their knockoffs. 1.2298 0.04249 161 133 19 9
891 I have two unconditional love models and two very conditional indifference models. 1.2298 0.04339 161 134 17 10
892 People just won't overpay for jewelry anymore. 1.2297 0.04078 148 119 24 5
893 Pooper scooper included. 1.2297 0.03846 148 117 28 3
894 They're a litteral steal. 1.2297 0.04190 148 120 22 6
895 I got your oxytocin fix right here, 2 for 1 1.2293 0.03820 157 125 28 4
896 These are certified 100 percent rescue. 1.2289 0.03976 166 135 24 7
897 A watch? Why get a watch when you can a watchdog! 1.2289 0.03788 166 133 28 5
898 They’re running on the No Labels ticket. 1.2289 0.04156 166 137 20 9
899 Trust me. Kittens are better than crack! 1.2288 0.03988 153 123 25 5
900 Of course, I have one that will match your outfit. Check out these puppies! 1.2288 0.03879 153 122 27 4
901 It's a fur coat 1.2286 0.04098 140 112 24 4
902 You won’t find these puppies in a store. 1.2286 0.04098 140 112 24 4
903 What, you never met a back-alley adoptionist? 1.2286 0.04087 175 145 20 10
904 Whatcha lookin for pal? I got TikTok trends, Instagram influencers, YouTube stars, and this one over here just went viral on Threads. 1.2286 0.04222 140 113 22 5
905 I’m telling you- these are authentic Aristocats. 1.2284 0.03943 162 131 25 6
906 I don't have any watches, but I do have a couple of watchdogs! 1.2282 0.03703 149 117 30 2
907 For the guy who has too many Rolexes! 1.2281 0.04068 171 141 21 9
908 Papers? They ain’t got no papers. They don’t need no papers. I don’t have to show you any stinkin’ papers. 1.2279 0.04424 136 111 19 6
909 That's right! Buy a dog, get a cat for free. 1.2279 0.04545 136 112 17 7
910 Ten dollars each or two for five. 1.2276 0.04237 145 118 21 6
911 Each comes with grey poupon" 1.2276 0.04237 145 118 21 6
912 Psst, I gotchyer dopamine fix here…. 1.2276 0.04005 145 116 25 4
913 How about it pal, genuine Cock-a-Poos and Persians, luxury brands without the luxury price? 1.2275 0.03768 167 134 28 5
914 They’re too cute for words: Fifty bucks. 1.2273 0.04274 154 127 19 8
915 Trust me, they're all potty trained. 1.2273 0.04562 154 130 13 11
916 I have just thing for the well-dressed millennial in bathroom slippers... 1.2273 0.03857 154 123 27 4
917 And it works especially well when it rains cats and dogs 1.2273 0.04274 154 127 19 8
918 Watches just weren’t selling anymore. 1.2273 0.04071 154 125 23 6
919 You wanna have a good time...? 1.2270 0.03921 163 132 25 6
920 Get ,‘‘em while their tots 1.2270 0.03921 163 132 25 6
921 They’re authentic. They have pet degrees. 1.2270 0.03921 163 132 25 6
922 Addictive? Naaaaaah! 1.2270 0.04195 141 114 22 5
923 I also have a nude parakeet. 1.2270 0.04653 141 118 14 9
924 Pocket Pets the new hot Christmas gift! 1.2267 0.03875 172 140 25 7
925 Psssst … Purebreds … Registered … and noone needs to ever know! 1.2267 0.03786 172 139 27 6
926 $50 and I'll throw in a Rolex 1.2267 0.04030 150 121 24 5
927 They’re puppets you moron! 1.2267 0.04350 150 124 18 8
928 Urban pet-pocket 1.2266 0.04032 128 101 25 2
929 They're puppets. You can make 'em do whatever YOU want! 1.2264 0.03983 159 129 24 6
930 Yeah, I know they're not exotic, but you gotta admit they're cute. 1.2262 0.03933 168 137 24 7
931 My belt is actually a flea and tick collar. 1.2262 0.03933 168 137 24 7
932 Your choice. Only one owner. 1.2260 0.04211 146 119 21 6
933 Cats or dogs - Better than Ken or Barbie, kid 1.2260 0.04430 146 121 17 8
934 I wanted to redefine ‘pet shelter,’ what do you think? 1.2260 0.04211 146 119 21 6
935 And they're all organic, free range and gluten-free! 1.2256 0.04087 164 135 21 8
936 They’re good dogs, Brent. 1.2254 0.03766 173 140 27 6
937 Take all four and I’ll throw in a rat! 1.2254 0.04168 142 115 22 5
938 They call me a cat burglar… what they don’t know is I steal dogs too 1.2254 0.04047 142 114 24 4
939 I got Rolex, Cartier, Hermes, Fido.” 1.2252 0.04114 151 123 22 6
940 Call it an out-of-pocket expense. 1.2252 0.04220 151 124 20 7
941 Leashes are so passé! 1.2250 0.03960 160 130 24 6
942 It was raining cats and dogs. I caught a few. 1.2250 0.03960 160 130 24 6
943 This is the ideal raincoat for when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.2246 0.04243 138 112 21 5
944 They’re designer. 1.2246 0.04116 138 111 23 4
945 Your sweatshirt's "kangaroo" pocket got me thinking... 1.2245 0.04185 147 120 21 6
946 These are authentic, from when it was raining cats and dogs. 1.2245 0.03837 147 117 27 3
947 And you don't need to wind them up. 1.2245 0.04402 147 122 17 8
948 Wanna buy a pocket pet? 1.2244 0.04024 156 127 23 6
949 I gather them each time it rains. 1.2244 0.03920 156 126 25 5
950 Three cats for the price of one dog! 1.2244 0.04224 156 129 19 8
951 Can I interest you in an alley cat? 1.2239 0.04449 134 110 18 6
952 Ok, the watches were fake. But these are the genuine, real deal, living Easter bunnies. 1.2239 0.04449 134 110 18 6
953 All of these beauties are the genuine article imported directly from Switzerland. 1.2238 0.04142 143 116 22 5
954 They don't look like much but put them on the internet and you'll be making millions. 1.2237 0.04090 152 124 22 6
955 Papers? Sure rhey come with papers!! I got all the newspapers you need! 1.2237 0.04298 152 126 18 8
956 Hey Buddy, How about a Hot Dog or a Cool Cat? 1.2236 0.04131 161 133 20 8
957 Think of it as a rescue pet! 1.2236 0.04035 161 132 22 7
958 All guaranteed genuine - but less than half of what you'll pay at the rescue shelter! 1.2236 0.03736 161 129 28 4
959 They're rescues. 1.2231 0.04267 130 105 21 4
960 I also have a rabbit under my hat. 1.2230 0.04456 139 115 17 7
961 I’m not who you’re looking for but I am who you need 1.2230 0.04269 148 122 19 7
962 Yeah, they can tell time" 1.2230 0.04048 148 120 23 5
963 i'm really attached to these cuties so they have to be kept together and i come along 1.2229 0.04390 157 132 15 10
964 You won’t know the time, but you will be loved. 1.2229 0.03857 166 135 25 6
965 They're happy; I'm happy; you'll be happy too. 1.2222 0.03735 153 122 28 3
966 Need a pocket watchdog? 1.2222 0.03959 153 124 24 5
967 This is the perfect raincoat for when it rains cats and dogs! 1.2222 0.04456 144 120 16 8
968 I also carry pets who aren't so eager to be adopted. 1.2222 0.04272 153 127 18 8
969 If you take these four, I’ll throw in the other thirty seven for free. 1.2222 0.03959 153 124 24 5
970 So Slipper Guy, last-minute purchase for your kid’s birthday? That’ll cost you extra. 1.2222 0.04419 135 111 18 6
971 I got labraDogs and doodles - all the cute for half the price 1.2222 0.04027 135 108 24 3
972 First thing I made in taxidermy class? This jacket. 1.2222 0.04013 162 133 22 7
973 I've got a Gucci, Harry Winston, Tiffany..all designer 1.2216 0.03929 167 137 23 7
974 It's black market but they're very well behaved. 1.2215 0.03661 158 126 29 3
975 I sell love on the streets because it’s the most potent drug I know. 1.2215 0.03769 158 127 27 4
976 Only a vet can tell if they’re fake. 1.2215 0.04134 149 122 21 6
977 I’m actually just selling the coats - meet my pets Tabby, Rudy, Roger, and Spot. 1.2215 0.04243 149 123 19 7
978 I’ve got great deals on COVID pets! 1.2214 0.04653 140 118 13 9
979 Best pick of the litter! 1.2214 0.04064 140 113 23 4
980 "Yeah, they're knockoffs. But they're cheap." 1.2214 0.04064 140 113 23 4
981 Psst…buddy…first one’s free. 1.2214 0.04635 131 109 15 7
982 How can I afford to charge you so little? The dry cleaner is my mother-in-law! 1.2214 0.04635 131 109 15 7
983 Trust me no one can tell there knockoffs. 1.2209 0.04084 163 135 20 8
984 Fresh, from yesterday's storm. 1.2208 0.04146 154 127 20 7
985 Let’s just say that my 401K is not performing well. 1.2208 0.04146 154 127 20 7
986 They’re pocket-trained and up-to-date on all their vaccinations. 1.2208 0.04146 154 127 20 7
987 Fakes?...These were made right here in Brooklyn! 1.2208 0.03936 154 125 24 5
988 Here at Alley cat and dog co., you skip the pet store markup. 1.2206 0.04390 136 112 18 6
989 Sir, these are genuine offspring of King Charles' royal pets. 1.2206 0.04264 136 111 20 5
990 Hey Bud, can I interest you in a Rovrex, Catier, Buldogva or a Catsio? 1.2206 0.04264 136 111 20 5
991 ...AND they're already coat-trained! 1.2206 0.04390 136 112 18 6
992 These hand puppets come with beautifully scented hand sanitizers. 1.2201 0.03955 159 130 23 6
993 One of these cuties on your dating profile and Tinder will light up like Fire. 1.2201 0.03853 159 129 25 5
994 Cheaper than kids, rent, and eggs. 1.2200 0.04322 150 125 17 8
995 Welcome to petcoat. 1.2199 0.04281 141 116 19 6
996 You looking for some dopamine? 1.2199 0.04398 141 117 17 7
997 Rescues? Yeah, they were rescued off the back of a truck. 1.2197 0.04344 132 108 19 5
998 I also have tiny Rolexes that would look great on their little paws. 1.2197 0.04726 132 111 13 8
999 And if you’re into REALLY heavy petting… 1.2195 0.04153 164 137 18 9
1000 Sorry, I must have grabbed my wife’s coat by mistake. 1.2195 0.04551 123 101 17 5
1001 Your follower numbers will go through the roof with these bad boys! 1.2194 0.03692 155 124 28 3
1002 They'll guard you from creepy men wearing trench coats in dark alleys. 1.2194 0.04222 155 129 18 8
1003 No animals were harmed in making this fur lining. 1.2194 0.04121 155 128 20 7
1004 Spayed or neutered and all their shots. Trust me. 1.2194 0.04222 155 129 18 8
1005 And of course, you’ll be wanting the extended warranty. 1.2194 0.04018 155 127 22 6
1006 C'mon, man, they're so cute! You KNOW you want one. And the first one's free! 1.2192 0.03700 146 116 28 2
1007 Ok, dogs are expensive, need walking, and want you to love them to death. Pick a cat. 1.2190 0.04361 137 113 18 6
1008 These are genuine Rolex watch dogs. 1.2190 0.04361 137 113 18 6
1009 Ready to upgrade your wall of plants? 1.2190 0.03974 137 110 24 3
1010 After you walk away, say you adopted from the shelter 1.2190 0.03974 137 110 24 3
1011 It's lining cats and dogs. 1.2188 0.04565 128 106 16 6
1012 Giving people a reason to love is a rare commodity now-a-days. 1.2188 0.03831 160 130 25 5
1013 I'll sell you all of them for 40 bucks and I'll throw in the Brooklyn Bridge for another 30. 1.2188 0.03831 160 130 25 5
1014 i’ve found this to be a more long-term solution to your loneliness problem 1.2188 0.04287 128 104 20 4
1015 These are a great deal - straight from the suburbs. 1.2188 0.04698 128 107 14 7
1016 Pick your choice: Cartier, Seiko, Rolex and Patek Phillippe. 1.2188 0.04565 128 106 16 6
1017 Pure serotonin, uncut tails, $20 a gram 1.2188 0.04565 128 106 16 6
1018 You were expecting Rolexes? 1.2185 0.04295 151 126 17 8
1019 Do you want some doggie or a pussy? 1.2185 0.04295 151 126 17 8
1020 It's buy one get one free 1.2185 0.04191 151 125 19 7
1021 C’mon, just one little pet won’t kill ya. 1.2183 0.04254 142 117 19 6
1022 I have pussies galore. 1.2183 0.04135 142 116 21 5
1023 ...and they come with my personal guarantee that they're housetrained. 1.2183 0.04254 142 117 19 6
1024 Climate change, eh? It used to just rain these things. 1.2183 0.04254 142 117 19 6
1025 I call them coattails. 1.2183 0.04254 142 117 19 6
1026 Look-y here -- it's raining them inside the coat, too! 1.2182 0.03946 165 136 22 7
1027 I can also get the cat outta the bag but I'll cost you extra 1.2180 0.04180 133 108 21 4
1028 I've got the best drugs right here. 1.2179 0.04097 156 129 20 7
1029 Genuine furs - just fell off the truck 1.2179 0.03995 156 128 22 6
1030 That'll be twenty bucks a pup 1.2177 0.04660 124 103 15 6
1031 See? This coat’s perfect for when it’s raining cats and dogs. 1.2174 0.04080 138 112 22 4
1032 They can ride the subway this way. 1.2174 0.03810 161 131 25 5
1033 When you close the pet stores, it just goes underground. 1.2174 0.04080 138 112 22 4
1034 Take all four and I'll throw in this useful jacket with pouches. 1.2174 0.04208 138 113 20 5
1035 Fleas are included! 1.2174 0.03949 138 111 24 3
1036 AND...They are way cuter than pocket gophers! 1.2174 0.04008 161 133 21 7
1037 Hey, mister, can I interest you in a companion? 1.2174 0.04104 161 134 19 8
1038 It’s a different kind of high. 1.2174 0.04008 161 133 21 7
1039 Well, that depends. Do you want something with a bite or a bark? 1.2171 0.03724 152 122 27 3
1040 And this one will take care of your mother-in-law—it’s an emotional support animal. 1.2171 0.03840 152 123 25 4
1041 I’ll throw in the coat, too. For the love of God, please take the coat! 1.2171 0.04112 129 104 22 3
1042 I’ve also got gerbils. 1.2171 0.04257 129 105 20 4
1043 Real authentic mood boosters right here! 1.2171 0.04257 129 105 20 4
1044 Got some hot dogs and cute kitties here. See anything you like? 1.2168 0.04342 143 119 17 7
1045 Of course they have pedigrees! 1.2168 0.04109 143 117 21 5
1046 At least its not raining 1.2168 0.04109 143 117 21 5
1047 ...and they are all original 1.2166 0.04269 157 132 16 9
1048 Which one's life do you want to save? 1.2164 0.04285 134 110 19 5
1049 My raincoat is rated G. 1.2162 0.04238 148 123 18 7
1050 'As you can see, they're already coat-trained." 1.2162 0.04128 148 122 20 6
1051 One of these will make you forget how doomed we all are. 1.2162 0.04016 148 121 22 5
1052 They're from France. 1.2162 0.04345 148 124 16 8
1053 These are definitely not knock-offs. They are the real thing. 1.2162 0.03780 148 119 26 3
1054 Free to a good home 1.2160 0.03789 162 132 25 5
1055 Oh, you want the good stuff? Just one of these will give you an endless supply of dopamine. 1.2158 0.04054 139 113 22 4
1056 Four for a dollar. 1.2158 0.04423 139 116 16 7
1057 AI took my old job and gave me pet therapy 1.2158 0.04181 139 114 20 5
1058 Guaranteed to steal your heart 1.2158 0.04181 139 114 20 5
1059 Pure. Not cut with anything. 1.2158 0.03923 139 112 24 3
1060 Pssst…can I interest you in some young love for sale? 1.2156 0.03995 167 139 20 8
1061 These are gen-u-ine, top-of-the-line, felines and canines. whatcha lookin for, Jack? 1.2154 0.04084 130 105 22 3
1062 Authentic pet-à-porter. You have my word on it! 1.2154 0.04631 130 109 14 7
1063 They're from a mixed litter. 1.2154 0.04631 130 109 14 7
1064 An' when I sees ya I say, "Hey, any guy who jogs in bedroom slippers has gotta be OK for one a dese!" 1.2153 0.03962 144 117 23 4
1065 Cats and dogs, living together. It’ll be anarchy. 1.2153 0.03838 144 116 25 3
1066 Buy something to help an old vet out, buddy? 1.2148 0.04256 135 111 19 5
1067 Psst....wanna start an Instagram account? 1.2148 0.04384 135 112 17 6
1068 If it’s iguanas you, you gotta go to Miami. 1.2148 0.04256 135 111 19 5
1069 Bats? No, I don't do bats anymore. 1.2148 0.04384 135 112 17 6
1070 I have some knock offs in the back, too. 1.2148 0.04212 149 124 18 7
1071 If you buy one off these, I’ll throw in the watch for free! 1.2147 0.03964 163 135 21 7
1072 they give a lickin' and keep on tickin' 1.2147 0.03964 163 135 21 7
1073 It is one hundred percent pure joy! 1.2143 0.04275 140 116 18 6
1074 This one’s a real Roverlex. 1.2143 0.04153 140 115 20 5
1075 And they're all rescues! 1.2138 0.03926 159 131 22 6
1076 I got them during a rain storm. 1.2138 0.04287 145 121 17 7
1077 Approved by both Repuglicans and Democats 1.2138 0.04287 145 121 17 7
1078 'They're genuine Gucci-Goo" 1.2138 0.03814 145 117 25 3
1079 You missing a cat or dog? 1.2138 0.04057 145 119 21 5
1080 A Rolex? No, but the one in the upper right is a watchdog. 1.2137 0.04056 131 106 22 3
1081 You want some oxytocin? 1.2137 0.04198 131 107 20 4
1082 Kid-tested. PETA-approved. 1.2137 0.04198 131 107 20 4
1083 Designer pets at back-alley prices. 1.2134 0.03942 164 136 21 7
1084 these pets were saved by George Santos 1.2132 0.04478 136 114 15 7
1085 You can clearly see they are all potty-trained. 1.2132 0.04228 136 112 19 5
1086 Wanna buy a little furry tragedy that will love you unconditionally for about a dozen years then leave you heartbroken? 1.2132 0.04228 136 112 19 5
1087 They’re cuter than a watch. 1.2128 0.04248 141 117 18 6
1088 "Hey pal, you lookin' for a good time?" 1.2126 0.04276 127 104 19 4
1089 Trust me, they won’t stray far! 1.2125 0.03904 160 132 22 6
1090 BUY A KITTEN AND GET A FREE PUPPY! 1.2125 0.04100 160 134 18 8
1091 ... and second prize is, two! 1.2125 0.03904 160 132 22 6
1092 If you don't think they are real, then check the bottoms of your sandals my friend.That's not mud! 1.2123 0.04032 146 120 21 5
1093 Pocket pets? Of course! 1.2123 0.03913 146 119 23 4
1094 Yesterday’s rain. 1.2121 0.03920 165 137 21 7
1095 They’re French. 1.2119 0.04054 151 125 20 6
1096 I used to sell dirty postcards but I found that more people want these. 1.2119 0.03592 151 121 28 2
1097 Psst. Love for sale. 1.2119 0.04054 151 125 20 6
1098 You look like a responsible user 1.2119 0.04638 118 98 15 5
1099 It's your pickpocket of the litter. 1.2119 0.04638 118 98 15 5
1100 Psst! Wanna buy a reason to get out of bed? 1.2119 0.04638 118 98 15 5
1101 This one will reduce anxiety… until they swallow a sock 1.2119 0.04941 118 100 11 7
1102 If puppies and kittens are not for you, I have a nice selection of reptiles over on the right! 1.2117 0.04326 137 114 17 6
1103 Almost fully potty trained 1.2117 0.04070 137 112 21 4
1104 Best price. Plus, it’s fur lined. 1.2117 0.03936 137 111 23 3
1105 And you are entitled to two replacements, no question asked. 1.2115 0.03751 156 127 25 4
1106 Pocket puppies, it’s a hot thing now. Get them while you can. 1.2115 0.03965 156 129 21 6
1107 Ok, so I'm a cat burger. Are you buying or not? 1.2114 0.05065 123 106 8 9
1108 Even better! They're pre-shelter pets. If you don't buy 'em, that's exactly where they're going. 1.2113 0.03977 142 116 22 4
1109 I'm in the unconditional love business now" 1.2109 0.04388 128 106 17 5
1110 No they aren’t “free”, they are four. 1.2109 0.04122 147 122 19 6
1111 Yeah, rescues. They fell off the back of a truck. 1.2108 0.03504 166 134 29 3
1112 Of course they’re responsibly bred. 1.2105 0.04136 152 127 18 7
1113 You buy one and the three you don’t buy we drown in the East River. 1.2105 0.04408 133 111 16 6
1114 Is this the kind of little pussy you're talking about? 1.2105 0.04136 152 127 18 7
1115 Each one a million views, guaranteed. 1.2105 0.04136 152 127 18 7
1116 This one ate the Mickey Mouse. 1.2105 0.03691 152 123 26 3
1117 Meet Chat...G...P...and T. Aren't they cute and harmless looking? 1.2105 0.04342 152 129 14 9
1118 More choices are coming…my wife is at the zoo. 1.2105 0.04029 152 126 20 6
1119 Of course they're legit. I have their papers right here 1.2105 0.04240 152 128 16 8
1120 Nobody has to know they're not purebreds, am I right? 1.2102 0.03618 157 127 27 3
1121 Absolutely guaranteed never to grow into cats or dogs! 1.2102 0.04044 157 131 19 7
1122 For when it's raining cats and dogs 1.2101 0.04172 138 114 19 5
1123 With the new pet a porter, your pets can fly for free. 1.2101 0.04172 138 114 19 5
1124 Hey buddy, they just fell off a Petco truck ... 1.2101 0.03772 138 111 25 2
1125 You a dog guy? A cat guy? I got ya covered. 1.2101 0.03910 138 112 23 3
1126 Of COURSE they're hot! 1.2101 0.04418 138 116 15 7
1127 Emotional Support Blackmarket 1.2101 0.04172 138 114 19 5
1128 They sing and can tap as well! 1.2101 0.04603 119 99 15 5
1129 These aren’t knockoffs. They’re the real deal. Go ahead. Scratch one. 1.2101 0.04445 119 98 17 4
1130 Small comfort for minor existential dread 1.2098 0.04074 143 118 20 5
1131 They come with the coat. 1.2098 0.04193 143 119 18 6
1132 Hey, wanna buy some love? 1.2098 0.04193 143 119 18 6
1133 Yes, these are 'rescues' 1.2095 0.04207 148 124 17 7
1134 For you, I've got both meowie-wowie and bowwie-wowie 1.2095 0.04315 148 125 15 8
1135 Wait 'til you see the other side. 1.2093 0.04216 129 106 19 4
1136 Want to get some love? 1.2093 0.04070 129 105 21 3
1137 Guaranteed to go viral on TikTok. 1.2092 0.04111 153 128 18 7
1138 They also come with a leash 1.2092 0.04005 153 127 20 6
1139 I hear you’re looking for a good boy? My stuff’s top of the line. 1.2092 0.03784 153 125 24 4
1140 Psst! Wanna buy one? They're all tiktok trained 1.2092 0.03896 153 126 22 5
1141 Wanna watch a buy? 1.2090 0.04377 134 112 16 6
1142 It's the newest down alternative! 1.2090 0.04113 134 110 20 4
1143 you know you want the doodle 1.2090 0.04247 134 111 18 5
1144 Buy three and get one free! 1.2086 0.04268 139 116 17 6
1145 Yeah, the pandemic totally changed my business model. 1.2086 0.04017 139 114 21 4
1146 Moving on from Grant, this is Franklin. 1.2086 0.04268 139 116 17 6
1147 They're untraceable...their names have been scratched off the tags. 1.2086 0.04389 139 117 15 7
1148 These are the cat’s meow. Trust me. 1.2086 0.04017 139 114 21 4
1149 Take a look. I can absolutely guarantee that they were not made in China. 1.2086 0.03885 139 113 23 3
1150 Honestly, I just got tired of posting their pictures 1.2086 0.03885 139 113 23 3
1151 Two dogs and two cats in a trench coat, if you're being pedantic. 1.2086 0.04145 139 115 19 5
1152 Any one of them will bring your slippers! 1.2086 0.03839 163 135 22 6
1153 Designer hypoallergenic crosses that I personally rescued from a well-known boutique kennel-cattery! I have more in my pants! 1.2083 0.03927 144 118 22 4
1154 Why you wearing slippers, buddy? 1.2083 0.04394 144 122 14 8
1155 Yes, it’s totally reversible but careful when it’s raining cats & dogs. 1.2083 0.03671 144 116 26 2
1156 As you can see, I got caught in that rain last night! 1.2083 0.04394 144 122 14 8
1157 Hi, my name's Rocco and I'm running for Congress. 1.2083 0.04568 120 100 15 5
1158 Not only are they all well-trained but the overcoat is guaranteed to be 100% waterproof! 1.2081 0.03842 149 122 23 4
1159 If you buy the set, I'll even add two mice. 1.2081 0.04288 149 126 15 8
1160 Purebred, housebroken and chips removed. All four for the price of one. 1.2081 0.03842 149 122 23 4
1161 This is the perfect coat, when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.2077 0.04186 130 107 19 4
1162 They turn invisible when your landlord drops by. 1.2077 0.03891 130 105 23 2
1163 Buy two and get a free watch! 1.2077 0.03891 130 105 23 2
1164 ...and this the special fur lining in the coat is great for all kinds of weather. 1.2077 0.04327 130 108 17 5
1165 And each one has at least 100,000 followers on Tik Tok. 1.2074 0.04348 135 113 16 6
1166 Psssst…wanna buy a watch? I’ve got Rrrrolex or Catier! 1.2074 0.04348 135 113 16 6
1167 Ten bucks. Just look at the pocket space. 1.2074 0.04219 135 112 18 5
1168 Get a cat and dog rain coat 1.2069 0.03902 145 119 22 4
1169 I just picked up the calico last night. He’s got the purest purr for your buck. 1.2069 0.04023 145 120 20 5
1170 Hey buddy, wanna rule the Internet?? 1.2065 0.04361 155 133 12 10
1171 Ya see, dis coat serves two purposes: it can keep you warm and dry... and it can be a place for your pets in your tiny apartment that don't allow no pets. 1.2065 0.03851 155 128 22 5
1172 This coat is also available with small rodent and snake size pockets 1.2065 0.04062 155 130 18 7
1173 ...and these puppies will cost you extra. 1.2063 0.03955 126 102 22 2
1174 Hey man, I hear you’re looking for happiness and companionship. I got what you need, 2 for 1. 1.2063 0.03955 126 102 22 2
1175 The ladies like it better than flashing. 1.2063 0.04264 126 104 18 4
1176 Am I a weird guy? 1.2063 0.04410 126 105 16 5
1177 They’re already microchipped. 1.2063 0.03772 160 132 23 5
1178 ....and I've also got a lovely ferret down my trousers - wanna see that? 1.2061 0.04014 131 107 21 3
1179 Too cute? I've got a pit bull on my right side. 1.2061 0.04296 131 109 17 5
1180 I had a feeling you'd be back for more. 1.2061 0.04431 131 110 15 6
1181 Kangaroo? I’ve got two on the coat’s other side 1.2059 0.04058 136 112 20 4
1182 They’re warm and cuddley but I swear they’re not hot. 1.2059 0.03922 136 111 22 3
1183 You’ll be up all night. Guaranteed! 1.2059 0.03780 136 110 24 2
1184 Oxytocin fix? 1.2057 0.04091 141 117 19 5
1185 Top of the line - as pure as they come 1.2057 0.04091 141 117 19 5
1186 What can I say? They warm my heart! 1.2057 0.03835 141 115 23 3
1187 You'll love the coat-It's a custom lining. Hypoallergenic. 1.2057 0.03835 141 115 23 3
1188 Looking for some companionship, stranger? 1.2057 0.04213 141 118 17 6
1189 Best of all, no home visit and no background check. 1.2055 0.03998 146 121 20 5
1190 Works as well as Lexapro! 1.2055 0.04114 146 122 18 6
1191 ...or perhaps you'd like to see the gerbils? 1.2055 0.04338 146 124 14 8
1192 I let the dogs out, but the cats stay in. 1.2051 0.03368 156 125 30 1
1193 I'm telling ya', put one of these on your Insta and you'll be rich! 1.2051 0.04038 156 131 18 7
1194 100% Real Kittens & Pooches. Buy one, get one. Only 4 left. 1.2051 0.04785 117 99 12 6
1195 Sir, I can tell from your shoes, you are a man who knows soft snuggable comfort. Please allow me to demonstrate the MeowMeow2000. 1.2051 0.03935 156 130 20 6
1196 I sell cuties on the QT! 1.2047 0.04233 127 105 18 4
1197 My jacket smells like shit, but it's worth it. 1.2047 0.04519 127 107 14 6
1198 'They're new... Pocket Pets, ideal for city living.' 1.2047 0.03927 127 103 22 2
1199 Running a special on teacups 1.2045 0.04530 132 112 13 7
1200 If you take all four, I'll throw in the trench coat for free. 1.2045 0.04267 132 110 17 5
1201 I told you I could get you loads of pussy. Now pay up. 1.2045 0.04267 132 110 17 5
1202 This is not a caption. This cartoon is so good a caption is superfluous! 1.2044 0.04533 137 117 12 8
1203 And they're all hypoallergenic! 1.2044 0.03458 137 109 28 0
1204 Looks like you could use a pocket full of dreams,chum. 1.2044 0.04031 137 113 20 4
1205 Knock offs? No! Their real. 1.2044 0.04289 137 115 16 6
1206 Notice the smooth motion on the second paw, that's how you know they're genuine. 1.2042 0.03811 142 116 23 3
1207 Wanna buy a slightly used Covid pet? 1.2042 0.04303 142 120 15 7
1208 Buy all four,and I'll throw in my coat for free. 1.2041 0.04089 147 123 18 6
1209 It's all purrfectly legal. 1.2041 0.03731 147 120 24 3
1210 They prefer being carried. 1.2041 0.03731 147 120 24 3
1211 Pick of the litter. 1.2039 0.03887 152 126 21 5
1212 Dopamine is a drug too. 1.2035 0.04560 113 94 15 4
1213 I take it you sell raincoats, too?” 1.2034 0.04593 118 99 14 5
1214 Can I interest you in a pocket pet? 1.2034 0.04593 118 99 14 5
1215 I’m out of watches, but I have some excellent watch dogs.” 1.2033 0.04612 123 104 13 6
1216 I’ve got hush puppies and cat slippers 1.2033 0.04156 123 101 19 3
1217 You said you were looking for an escort? 1.2033 0.04612 123 104 13 6
1218 You can have them all for the same low price. 1.2033 0.04313 123 102 17 4
1219 Do you have any normal drugs? 1.2033 0.04313 123 102 17 4
1220 They're even better than a NFT 1.2031 0.03899 128 104 22 2
1221 Just to let you know: No animals were injured or endangered during this contest post. 1.2031 0.04347 128 107 16 5
1222 I've got puppers and meowners. 1.2031 0.04203 128 106 18 4
1223 I have Korean cookbooks as well. 1.2030 0.03959 133 109 21 3
1224 You want a friend? Buy a puppy! You want to be ignored all day? Invite your in-laws, I’m keeping the kittens! 1.2030 0.04369 133 112 15 6
1225 They're real rescues 1.2029 0.04261 138 116 16 6
1226 I found them after a recent heavy rain. 1.2029 0.03870 138 113 22 3
1227 You look like a man who makes poor financial decisions. 1.2029 0.04383 138 117 14 7
1228 I got one of everything to help with your anxiety. 1.2029 0.04135 138 115 18 5
1229 You may not be able to tell the time... But you won't care. 1.2028 0.04159 143 120 17 6
1230 5 bucks each plus #needadate. 1.2027 0.03708 148 121 24 3
1231 Lineages absolutely untraceable. 1.2025 0.03889 158 132 20 6
1232 Each one comes wida 2 year suscripshun to Da New Yorker. After ya read all that intalekual stuff n smirk at da cartoons, yous can rip da mags apart n use 'em for wee-wee pads! 1.2025 0.04097 163 139 15 9
1233 How about a dog from my cat-o-log? 1.2017 0.04557 119 100 14 5
1234 Buy three pandemic pets,I’ll throw the fourth in for free 1.2017 0.04398 119 99 16 4
1235 I found them littering the street after a downpour 1.2017 0.04398 119 99 16 4
1236 I'm still trying to find out which of them is the culprit. 1.2016 0.04126 124 102 19 3
1237 Buy any three and the jacket comes with it. 1.2016 0.04282 124 103 17 4
1238 Cocaine? That is SO yesterday! 1.2016 0.04316 129 108 16 5
1239 Hey, buddy; you want to buy a pre-rescued pet? 1.2016 0.04316 129 108 16 5
1240 the cats are half-price because you have to put their litter box in your coat closet 1.2016 0.04026 129 106 20 3
1241 With a coat like this you can sell whatever you want! 1.2016 0.04173 129 107 18 4
1242 Get one for every mood 1.2016 0.04173 129 107 18 4
1243 I switched my product line! 1.2016 0.04173 129 107 18 4
1244 D&G? Noo… it’s D&C! Dogs and Cats, mate. Sorry for the mix up! 1.2016 0.04026 129 106 20 3
1245 It’s a raincoat. 1.2015 0.03932 134 110 21 3
1246 You can have the whole kittenmypoodle for twenty bucks. 1.2015 0.03787 134 109 23 2
1247 Last minute birthday gift for your niece that she will love you for and will make her parents crazy. 1.2015 0.04208 134 112 17 5
1248 You won't find a deal like this now that the rain has stopped. 1.2014 0.04354 139 118 14 7
1249 Relax with one of these beauties tonight! 1.2014 0.04232 139 117 16 6
1250 These purebreds are worth waay more than a Rolex these days! 1.2014 0.04354 139 118 14 7
1251 They dissuade the rober 'cause of their cuteness 1.2014 0.04232 139 117 16 6
1252 Specials for influencers 1.2014 0.04354 139 118 14 7
1253 Pedigree? Just look at them little faces. 1.2014 0.04132 144 121 17 6
1254 They’re scratch-resistant, but only if you trim their claws. 1.2014 0.04248 144 122 15 7
1255 ...and today's special is buy three get one free. 1.2014 0.03495 144 116 27 1
1256 Rent a pet to walk in the park, and you will meet many woman who will who give yon their phone nunnbers. 1.2014 0.04361 144 123 13 8
1257 Designer AI animals and no mess 1.2013 0.04038 149 125 18 6
1258 Pssst! IKEA fur coats. Some assembly required. 1.2013 0.03807 149 123 22 4
1259 Wanna buy a watch dog? 1.2000 0.04179 135 113 17 5
1260 Designer brands without the adoption costs. 1.2000 0.03935 125 102 21 2
1261 Hamsters? I'll check my pockets. 1.2000 0.04555 130 111 12 7
1262 I promise they’re not broken in any way. 1.2000 0.04399 125 105 15 5
1263 They're purebread. This here's a rare calicoo and that's a bagel. 1.2000 0.04013 150 126 18 6
1264 And for another fifty bucks I’ll throw in a camel. 1.2000 0.03906 135 111 21 3
1265 I recommend buying a pair and wearing the cat on the right and the dog on the left. 1.2000 0.03935 125 102 21 2
1266 So it's a no to the fake Rolex. Then how about a real pet? 1.2000 0.04364 120 100 16 4
1267 Maybe it's not what you thought,...but aren't they cuter. 1.2000 0.04364 120 100 16 4
1268 You like it? It's my cats and dogs raincoat. 1.2000 0.04286 130 109 16 5
1269 Mismatched pairs are even cheaper than seconds. 1.2000 0.04144 130 108 18 4
1270 Do you want one of these cuties to rescue you? 1.2000 0.04250 125 104 17 4
1271 Can I interest you in one of my fine domestic accessories to complete your public slipper ensemble? 1.2000 0.04144 130 108 18 4
1272 The cats are cisgender males and the dogs are transgender bitches. 1.2000 0.04310 135 114 15 6
1273 Let me help you take your mind off things 1.2000 0.04487 115 96 15 4
1274 With that footwear, you'll want this one here. 1.2000 0.04310 135 114 15 6
1275 Get your own cat scan cheap 1.2000 0.04286 130 109 16 5
1276 I have poop bags too but they're full of drugs. 1.2000 0.04559 135 116 11 8
1277 Catnip and squeaky toys not included. 1.2000 0.04621 110 92 14 4
1278 You have a fur lined coat for winter and just take ‘‘em out for summer! 1.2000 0.04399 125 105 15 5
1279 Psst! I got the good boys. 1.2000 0.04487 115 96 15 4
1280 They’ll keep you up all night 1.2000 0.03683 140 114 24 2
1281 How about a hot dog? 1.2000 0.04201 120 99 18 3
1282 I’m dunno man I’ve never paid for pussy before. 1.2000 0.04144 130 108 18 4
1283 Pssst! Wanna buy a watch dog? Or a watch cat? 1.2000 0.04244 110 90 18 2
1284 How’d you like to own a genuine kat or dahg? 1.2000 0.04654 115 97 13 5
1285 Your landlord will never have to know 1.2000 0.03820 140 115 22 3
1286 Get your serotonin here. 1.1987 0.03796 156 130 21 5
1287 Clones! Just like the original only half the price 1.1987 0.03989 151 127 18 6
1288 One Rolex, and all four are yours. 1.1987 0.04098 151 128 16 7
1289 They sell much better than my old stuff. Who can cuddle up to a filthy picture? 1.1986 0.04194 146 124 15 7
1290 They'll give you real love and joy when you pair them with your computer. 1.1986 0.04177 141 119 16 6
1291 No more loneliness. And chicks dig ‘em too. 1.1986 0.03796 141 116 22 3
1292 Yeah, I got your dopamine. 1.1986 0.04054 141 118 18 5
1293 Of course, I’ll need to run a background check and conduct a home inspection. 1.1985 0.04151 136 114 17 5
1294 I guarantee in one year the cats will be standoffish. 1.1985 0.04018 136 113 19 4
1295 Pssr. Hey pal, ya need a friend? 1.1985 0.04151 136 114 17 5
1296 Peta salesman, adopt a stray 1.1985 0.03880 136 112 21 3
1297 ... and this one is a Catsio. 1.1985 0.04280 136 115 15 6
1298 They broke the legal cute limit. 1.1985 0.04018 136 113 19 4
1299 The New Yorker hasn't been the same since they moved their office to Stamford 1.1985 0.04255 131 110 16 5
1300 I used to sell chicks too but I had to let them go cheep 1.1984 0.04367 126 106 15 5
1301 The show Cats closed. The understudies for sale. 1.1984 0.03741 126 102 23 1
1302 Sorry, I don't have 'a little horse'. 1.1984 0.04510 126 107 13 6
1303 Pssst…Check out my pussy. 1.1984 0.04510 126 107 13 6
1304 You want a rescue? Of course they’re rescues! Do I look like a guy who should have dogs? 1.1984 0.04367 126 106 15 5
1305 I dress in layers and pairs. 1.1983 0.04487 121 102 14 5
1306 I have two more in the back, say, how much for the slippers? 1.1983 0.04169 121 100 18 3
1307 Pick a name. Any name. 1.1983 0.04169 121 100 18 3
1308 I also have Parakeets but don't ask where I keep them . 1.1983 0.04169 121 100 18 3
1309 Buy two and I'll throw in the Brooklyn Bridge. 1.1983 0.04487 121 102 14 5
1310 This is an off-fur you can't refuse! 1.1983 0.04487 121 102 14 5
1311 It's not going to be raining much longer! 1.1983 0.04169 121 100 18 3
1312 I have just what you petophiles want. 1.1983 0.04617 116 98 13 5
1313 Hey buddy, unconditional love in a broken world for a buck each! 1.1983 0.04452 116 97 15 4
1314 Nah, dey ain't housebroken, buddy! I come by dese fair and square. 1.1983 0.04280 116 96 17 3
1315 You're probably wondering why none of them bit me. Actually I'm a man of bad taste. 1.1982 0.04758 111 94 12 5
1316 Of course they're not real. Real animals should never be treated this way. 1.1982 0.04758 111 94 12 5
1317 Each of them has +10.000 watch on YouTube. 1.1975 0.03880 157 132 19 6
1318 I don’t need someone to fetch my slippers. I wear them all the time. 1.1975 0.03880 157 132 19 6
1319 My pet hobby 1.1972 0.03771 142 117 22 3
1320 Pure virgin pets—never had a home before. 1.1972 0.03902 142 118 20 4
1321 No, that one is not an alley cat. Just me, an alley man. 1.1972 0.03637 142 116 24 2
1322 No no no,I said Petcoat,not Petticoat 1.1972 0.04028 142 119 18 5
1323 They're all emotional support animals. That's why I'm not upset about you mugging me. 1.1971 0.04123 137 115 17 5
1324 If you take all 4, I will throw the coat into the deal. 1.1971 0.03991 137 114 19 4
1325 And for an extra five bucks I put them in brown paper bags. 1.1971 0.03991 137 114 19 4
1326 These will make you feel even better than drugs. 1.1971 0.04252 137 116 15 6
1327 Fir the price, you just can’t pass it up. No, the kittens and puppies are mine. They’re merely there for illustrative purposes as to the many uses of the liner. 1.1971 0.03712 137 112 23 2
1328 Take your pick. Rolex, Omega ,Swatch or Timex. Oh sorry, that was yesterday’s selection. Today is Mittens, Fluffy, Spot or Joey. 1.1971 0.04123 137 115 17 5
1329 You wanna get cozy? This one--cozy as hell. TOO cozy, for some people. 1.1971 0.03854 137 113 21 3
1330 Eh--you want therapy? It's right here, pal. 1.1970 0.03943 132 109 20 3
1331 Hey dude, want a little pussy or a mutt? 1.1970 0.03793 132 108 22 2
1332 See anything you think you like but will come to regret in a few weeks? 1.1970 0.04226 132 111 16 5
1333 Siamese blue, cocker smackeral, Abyssinian gold, golly collie, unconditional love? You got it. 1.1970 0.04087 132 110 18 4
1334 Take the lot and I'll throw in the coat. 1.1970 0.04226 132 111 16 5
1335 I swear these are full breed you just have to wait for their fur to grow and you’ll see it 1.1970 0.03637 132 107 24 1
1336 Just add a leash and you have an easy excuse for bed head. 1.1969 0.04336 127 107 15 5
1337 Tick-free, guilt-free, tax-free. 1.1969 0.04615 127 109 11 7
1338 Sure they’re real! 1.1969 0.04336 127 107 15 5
1339 Every sweet puppy comes with a cat! 1.1969 0.04189 127 106 17 4
1340 Who needs a Rolex when unconditional love is for sale? 1.1969 0.04189 127 106 17 4
1341 'Do you want puppers or downers?' 1.1969 0.04189 127 106 17 4
1342 Psst. The first one’s free. 1.1969 0.04037 127 105 19 3
1343 You my friend looks sad and lonely, can I interest you in some additional responsibility? 1.1969 0.03879 127 104 21 2
1344 Hot deals on hot dogs! 1.1967 0.04299 122 102 16 4
1345 Say hello to my little friends 1.1966 0.04070 117 96 19 2
1346 Pssssst! Unconditional love for sale? 1.1966 0.03884 117 95 21 1
1347 C'mon, put a little joy in your life. 1.1966 0.04247 117 97 17 3
1348 Oh ya, they're legit. Petigreed and bona fido. 1.1966 0.04739 117 100 11 6
1349 Sorry, pal, no whippets. All I got is a lab, a terrier mix and two tabbies. 1.1966 0.04417 117 98 15 4
1350 These babies will give you a real high! 1.1964 0.04545 112 94 14 4
1351 "Cats and dogs rein. 1.1963 0.04868 107 91 11 5
1352 When they're not fighting like cats and dogs, they make great house pets. 1.1961 0.03830 153 128 20 5
1353 Tey're all named Rolex and thjey're not fake! 1.1959 0.03913 148 124 19 5
1354 Alley cat special - two fur the price of one 1.1958 0.03877 143 119 20 4
1355 It does come with a fur lining, actually a blend 1.1958 0.04002 143 120 18 5
1356 I’m telling you, I don’t have any tricks up my sleeve. 1.1957 0.04096 138 116 17 5
1357 You look like you're in need of a furry friend, son. 1.1957 0.03829 138 114 21 3
1358 Keep a lookout, there's a 'hug on sight' order out for them. 1.1957 0.03965 138 115 19 4
1359 These are half breeds for a quarter of the price. 1.1957 0.03829 138 114 21 3
1360 See, its a genuine fur-lined coat, guaranteed to keep you cute and cozy all winter! 1.1957 0.04096 138 116 17 5
1361 I’m with POP, pervs offering pets. 1.1955 0.03613 133 108 24 1
1362 Hmmm... my wife always wanted a petticoat. 1.1955 0.04059 133 111 18 4
1363 They have already been certified as companion pets for air travel 1.1955 0.03916 133 110 20 3
1364 I prefer the term "snuggling business." 1.1955 0.03452 133 107 26 0
1365 Got your finest bark meow-ket merchandise here! 1.1955 0.03613 133 108 24 1
1366 Just came in with yesterday’s rain. 1.1955 0.04330 133 113 14 6
1367 If I told you, what makes you think that you would believe me? 1.1955 0.03916 133 110 20 3
1368 Actually I am selling my concept of a kangaroo coat 1.1953 0.04159 128 107 17 4
1369 Sure they’re purebred… but if you can’t tell they’re not real rescues, neither can anyone else, am I right? 1.1953 0.03852 128 105 21 2
1370 Take your pick. 1.1953 0.04159 128 107 17 4
1371 Psst.. lookin for some non-rescues? 1.1953 0.03518 128 103 25 0
1372 Buy one of these babies and you'll never oversleep. They're all self-winding and waterproof, too. 1.1951 0.04712 123 106 10 7
1373 Yeah, yeah. They’re all rescues. 1.1951 0.04568 123 105 12 6
1374 And if you buy right now, I’ll throw in a free watch. 1.1951 0.04107 123 102 18 3
1375 Well, they were big sellers during the Covid crisis. 1.1951 0.04107 123 102 18 3
1376 Yeah...they're knockoffs but they have all been housebroken! 1.1949 0.04214 118 98 17 3
1377 100% genuine fur. 1.1949 0.04702 118 101 11 6
1378 Just...don't give them any treats after midnight. 1.1949 0.04214 118 98 17 3
1379 I carry only genuine puppys and kyttens. 1.1949 0.04214 118 98 17 3
1380 Have you seen these pets? They're wanted. 1.1949 0.04545 118 100 13 5
1381 '"Psst...today only I've got pocket pets for 50% off." 1.1947 0.04329 113 94 16 3
1382 They're coaty trained. 1.1947 0.03741 113 91 22 0
1383 They’re real furry. 1.1947 0.04142 113 93 18 2
1384 I'm the PetSmart pop-up. 1.1944 0.04643 108 91 13 4
1385 They’ll get you out of your slippers 1.1944 0.04254 108 89 17 2
1386 It turns out you can put a price on cuteness. 1.1944 0.04643 108 91 13 4
1387 All purebred with humane society papers… 1.1944 0.03724 144 119 22 3
1388 They just leaped off the back of a truck. 1.1944 0.03852 144 120 20 4
1389 The first one's free, plus a $200 donation to the shelter. 1.1942 0.03804 139 115 21 3
1390 How ‘bout buy one get one? 1.1942 0.03804 139 115 21 3
1391 Just busted out of the pound! 1.1942 0.04069 139 117 17 5
1392 Buy two get two and I'll throw in the coat. 1.1942 0.04069 139 117 17 5
1393 Guarantied to have a “Pet Agree”. 1.1942 0.04195 139 118 15 6
1394 Dogdoodle, catdoodle, I can get you anything you want. 1.1942 0.03804 139 115 21 3
1395 Of course they all know how to tell time. 1.1940 0.04168 134 113 16 5
1396 No Sir. I didn't bark nor did I meow at you. If you must know, take a look at this 1.1940 0.03889 134 111 20 3
1397 They all enjoyed lots of memories on this raincoat, so I'll throw it in for free. 1.1939 0.03637 165 138 22 5
1398 Oh, fuck! 1.1938 0.04548 129 111 11 7
1399 And none of them have been on youtube yet. 1.1938 0.03980 129 107 19 3
1400 Guaranteed pocket broken. 1.1938 0.03825 129 106 21 2
1401 Designer breeds for mutt prices. 1.1938 0.04273 129 109 15 5
1402 Perfect for the petophile in your life. 1.1938 0.04273 129 109 15 5
1403 I’m telling ya pal, you don’t need no high priced consultant or fancy software, I got the answer to boosting your views, likes and follows right here!! 1.1938 0.03915 160 136 17 7
1404 Love for sale 1.1935 0.04077 124 103 18 3
1405 It's been raining cats and dogs 1.1935 0.03913 124 102 20 2
1406 They look real, don’t they? 1.1935 0.04077 124 103 18 3
1407 I certainly never had to walk them. 1.1935 0.04387 124 105 14 5
1408 These are the latest in natural mood enhancers! 1.1935 0.04077 124 103 18 3
1409 I've got something that'll help you forget all your problems. 1.1935 0.04235 124 104 16 4
1410 From Texas. Guaranteed non-spayed or neutered. 1.1935 0.04387 124 105 14 5
1411 Kitty porn? 1.1933 0.04182 119 99 17 3
1412 You said you wanted a coat with four pooches, right? 1.1933 0.04349 119 100 15 4
1413 They're MacIGotchi the completely real virtual pet. 1.1933 0.04349 119 100 15 4
1414 The puppies are untraceable so you don’t have to pick up after them. 1.1931 0.04070 145 123 16 6
1415 Ok...ok...ok...tell you what, twenty-five bucks for the coat, and, as a trow in... my strays... 1.1931 0.03701 145 120 22 3
1416 I'm cashing in on all the rain lately. 1.1930 0.04109 114 94 18 2
1417 Of course they’re rescues! You rescue them from me, and you’ll be a hero! 1.1930 0.03916 114 93 20 1
1418 Got a special deal today. 2 fur 1. 1.1930 0.04642 114 97 12 5
1419 These are the last of my post pandemic previously purchased pocket pets sale. 1.1930 0.04642 114 97 12 5
1420 I'll give you the whole lot for 10 bucks, and I'll throw in the coat. 1.1929 0.04042 140 118 17 5
1421 They're from the Captain Kangaroo estate sale" 1.1927 0.04785 109 93 11 5
1422 Do you want a deal on a purebred? 1.1926 0.04271 135 115 14 6
1423 The eyes have it. 1.1926 0.04003 135 113 18 4
1424 I heard you're lookin' for pussy. 1.1926 0.04522 135 117 10 8
1425 Mini Service Pets: sure to get you in the front of the TSA line and small enough to put in your carry-on luggage! 1.1926 0.04003 135 113 18 4
1426 They just arrived from this morning's heavy rain! 1.1923 0.03952 130 108 19 3
1427 OK but would a gay guy have these? 1.1923 0.04381 130 111 13 6
1428 They’re cute, cheap and coat broken 1.1923 0.03952 130 108 19 3
1429 Take it from me, pal—in 20 years these beanies will be worth their weight in gold. 1.1921 0.03955 151 128 17 6
1430 Yeah, hot dogs. But cool cats. 1.1920 0.03885 125 103 20 2
1431 'Yes, of course I'm a licensed dealer.' 1.1920 0.03885 125 103 20 2
1432 I call it my pet fetish! 1.1920 0.04047 125 104 18 3
1433 It really was raining cats and dogs 1.1920 0.04204 125 105 16 4
1434 … And they’re guaranteed house broken! 1.1920 0.04500 125 107 12 6
1435 I snapped them up in the last rainstorm 1.1920 0.04204 125 105 16 4
1436 They’re not for sale, they’re just co-dependent. 1.1920 0.04355 125 106 14 5
1437 I somehow knew you were both a cat and a dog person. I’ve been waiting for you.” 1.1917 0.03797 120 98 21 1
1438 This one belonged to Lady Gaga, and this one to … 1.1917 0.04475 120 102 13 5
1439 I can give you a great deal on a watch dog and watch cat. 1.1917 0.04315 120 101 15 4
1440 Psst...Guaranteed happiness every time you pet one 1.1915 0.03617 141 116 23 2
1441 I rescued them from shelter 1.1915 0.03887 141 118 19 4
1442 The cats are descended from Cleopatras. 1.1915 0.04016 141 119 17 5
1443 They're made from real fur 1.1913 0.04435 115 97 14 4
1444 There is $100 cash in one of their pouches. Try your luck for a buck? 1.1912 0.04491 136 118 10 8
1445 Ya gotta roommate with allergies? 1.1912 0.04368 136 117 12 7
1446 Each one comes with a tiny realistic fake Rolex watch! 1.1912 0.04111 136 115 16 5
1447 I'm your man when it rains cats and dogs. 1.1912 0.03692 136 112 22 2
1448 None of these are hypoallergenic. 1.1912 0.03976 136 114 18 4
1449 Cheese is extra. 1.1912 0.03692 136 112 22 2
1450 $10 for pets, but the pets themselves are priceless 1.1912 0.03976 136 114 18 4
1451 A couple of them might be knockoffs. 1.1909 0.04379 110 92 15 3
1452 It will be ok, I am Banksy in disguise 1.1909 0.04745 110 94 11 5
1453 It's the perfect coat for when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.1908 0.03924 131 109 19 3
1454 I thought you said drugs and needles, not pugs and beagles 1.1908 0.04071 131 110 17 4
1455 I can cut you great deal - Pandemic overstock! Guaranteed made in the USA ! 1.1905 0.04607 126 109 10 7
1456 Get 'em, pet 'em...if you're inclined you can wed 'em... 1.1905 0.04018 126 105 18 3
1457 … and each one uses R.I., Real Intelligence, not AI ! 1.1901 0.03989 142 120 17 5
1458 And they come housebroken. 1.1901 0.03862 142 119 19 4
1459 Just one meow or bow wow and you won’t know what hit you 1.1901 0.03594 142 117 23 2
1460 Here me out, boss. No one else is doing this out there. Untapped market: Hugs, not drugs. 1.1898 0.04338 137 118 12 7
1461 Your choice as to cat, dog and a 5%, 10% or 20% tip! 1.1897 0.04400 116 98 14 4
1462 Of course they're safe! These animals were being held captive in Suburbia, they were born to obey 1.1897 0.03855 116 95 20 1
1463 These pocket size pets are a real hot item right now. 1.1897 0.04226 116 97 16 3
1464 Cat burglars got nothing on me. 1.1894 0.04184 132 112 15 5
1465 I'm packing. 1.1894 0.04043 132 111 17 4
1466 Get ‘em while their stray. 1.1894 0.04184 132 112 15 5
1467 Dad, you have to stop. 1.1894 0.04043 132 111 17 4
1468 I used to sell cars but with fiscal and monetary policies, trade relationships, tariffs, consumer spending indices, unemployment rates, interest rates, energy prices and geopolitical events it became too difficult to have any fiscal visibility. 1.1894 0.04043 132 111 17 4
1469 You don't want none of this shit- it's the happiest drug there is. 1.1892 0.04150 111 92 17 2
1470 The pet store ban in NY has made it difficult for us 1.1890 0.04143 127 107 16 4
1471 Psst, they're the pick of the lining." 1.1890 0.03829 127 105 20 2
1472 I told you I have the real deal. Let me introduce Chanel, Hermes, Louis Vuitton and Yves St. Laurent. 1.1890 0.04434 127 109 12 6
1473 I bet you think this is cute 1.1888 0.03964 143 121 17 5
1474 The previous owners want to remain anonymous. 1.1888 0.04086 143 122 15 6
1475 Hey, there's no sign against littering.! 1.1885 0.04407 122 104 13 5
1476 She's a genuine alley cat. 1.1885 0.04407 122 104 13 5
1477 They leapt off the back of a truck! 1.1885 0.04088 122 102 17 3
1478 And they each come with a unique built-in morning wake-up call. 1.1880 0.04531 117 100 12 5
1479 And I guarantee you that none of these endearing animals will make fun of you for wearing socks with your slippers like your loser girlfriend did. 1.1880 0.04193 117 98 16 3
1480 What do you wanna say, "I'm sorry" or "I love you"? 1.1880 0.04365 117 99 14 4
1481 This one's 50% off 'cause it's ferrel, grills tough. 1.1880 0.04014 117 97 18 2
1482 Nowadays I only show family friendly breeds. Flashing a Weiner, for example, can bring a lot of unwanted attention 1.1880 0.03826 117 96 20 1
1483 Actually—I’m technically registered as a “flea-free market.” 1.1880 0.04154 133 113 15 5
1484 On behalf of my dogs, I apologise for them trying to eat your slippers 1.1880 0.03871 133 111 19 3
1485 Sweet puppies and kitties- and not a one neutered! 1.1880 0.03720 133 110 21 2
1486 Ah yes, for the existential angst of urban living - I have just the right thing 1.1880 0.03720 133 110 21 2
1487 I guarantee that his father was Best In Class at Westminster. 1.1875 0.03802 128 106 20 2
1488 Can you believe the New Yorker paid me to sew these animals into my coat? 1.1875 0.04260 128 109 14 5
1489 I'd show you where I keep the goldfish, but there might be kids watching. 1.1875 0.04490 112 95 13 4
1490 First one is free, but then you're hooked. 1.1875 0.04981 96 82 10 4
1491 …and they’re already pocket trained! 1.1875 0.04260 128 109 14 5
1492 Genuine celebrity purse pets. This one's from an influencer's designer gym bag. 1.1875 0.04113 128 108 16 4
1493 Actually, he's a Fabradoodle... but who will ever know? 1.1875 0.03549 144 119 23 2
1494 Do you have any extra trench coats? 1.1875 0.04113 128 108 16 4
1495 You’d be surprised the business I do selling stuffed animals to emotionally repressed men like yourself. 1.1875 0.04666 112 96 11 5
1496 Oh don’t worry about the rain, I caught all the cats and dogs. 1.1875 0.04113 128 108 16 4
1497 Housebroken? They're all jacket-broken. 1.1875 0.03961 128 107 18 3
1498 Adoption will go smoother if you have deep pockets. 1.1871 0.04029 139 118 16 5
1499 In the other side of my coat, I have the armadillos. 1.1871 0.03897 139 117 18 4
1500 I used to wear a heavy winter coat, but this is one is warmer and keeps me company too! 1.1871 0.03897 139 117 18 4
1501 They all keep precise time. 1.1871 0.04029 139 118 16 5
1502 Absolutely! All my fur coats are PETA compliant. 1.1871 0.03761 139 116 20 3
1503 Yes, I am called a 'snuggler' for a good reason 1.1871 0.04156 139 119 14 6
1504 No one will know it didn’t come from the pound. 1.1870 0.04057 123 103 17 3
1505 Yours got the picking. Will give you a licking. 1.1870 0.04218 123 104 15 4
1506 fuhgeddabout da time! Does a wristwatch lick yer face? 1.1870 0.04057 123 103 17 3
1507 Interest you in a cheap, designer breed knockoff? 1.1870 0.04218 123 104 15 4
1508 I did a DNA. They're all mine! 1.1866 0.03987 134 113 17 4
1509 Guard dog, cat? 1.1864 0.03796 118 97 20 1
1510 Or you could use it to carry your digital devices! 1.1864 0.04161 118 99 16 3
1511 People usually ask to see the rooster first 1.1864 0.04807 118 103 8 7
1512 I got your Tabeys, your Doxands, your Beiguls, and your Syameez. 1.1864 0.04161 118 99 16 3
1513 No, but your phone can tell the time. 1.1863 0.04346 102 85 15 2
1514 Check this out, they're authentic. 1.1862 0.03660 145 121 21 3
1515 Pick A Pet, Any Pet 1.1860 0.04370 129 111 12 6
1516 All sales are feral 1.1860 0.03775 129 107 20 2
1517 Dog or cat person? Pick your poison 1.1860 0.04084 129 109 16 4
1518 Hey pal can you help me out here? I’m trying to help a friend get into the Electoral College” 1.1860 0.04229 129 110 14 5
1519 It's your HAND that goes in the puppet. 1.1858 0.04453 113 96 13 4
1520 This is the purest stuff out there. 1.1858 0.04272 113 95 15 3
1521 They’ll keep you up all night long! 1.1858 0.04453 113 96 13 4
1522 Could I interest you in a rescue puppet? 1.1858 0.04453 113 96 13 4
1523 You can have them for free. I'll just warn you they're not trench coat trained. 1.1858 0.04083 113 94 17 2
1524 Anyone will give you an endorphins high! 1.1858 0.04453 113 96 13 4
1525 You think your apartment's too small? Look at this! 1.1857 0.03872 140 118 18 4
1526 Hey buddy, would you like to buy a dopamine hit? 1.1857 0.03872 140 118 18 4
1527 Of course these are authentic katz and doges. 1.1855 0.04187 124 105 15 4
1528 They bark and meow just like the real thing! 1.1855 0.04027 124 104 17 3
1529 And her mother belongs to Taylor Swift… 1.1855 0.04489 124 107 11 6
1530 But wait…it has a cruelty-free, real-fur lining! 1.1855 0.04340 124 106 13 5
1531 They come with a Swiss Pedigree! 1.1855 0.03861 124 103 19 2
1532 What makes you think I'd have a kangaroo? 1.1854 0.04139 151 131 12 8
1533 Can I interest you in some puppers, pupper-dupers, snootie-snoots, fuzzy-faces, snickerdoodles, floofs, tiny-paws, or snuggle-snoofs? 1.1852 0.04097 135 115 15 5
1534 Two for one deal on the kittens. I'm allergic. 1.1852 0.04191 108 90 16 2
1535 Hey there. Looking for some companionship? 1.1849 0.04460 119 102 12 5
1536 Runaway prices! 1.1849 0.04128 119 100 16 3
1537 I’ve branched out from cat burglary. 1.1849 0.04460 119 102 12 5
1538 See if you can pick our next President of the United States. 1.1846 0.04055 130 110 16 4
1539 'Wanna fixed?' 1.1846 0.04199 130 111 14 5
1540 If kittens and puppies ain't your thing, how about a feral chicken? 1.1846 0.04055 130 110 16 4
1541 What do they do you ask....they eat ,poop and drive you nuts 1.1846 0.03749 130 108 20 2
1542 They're pure oxytocin, bud. Take your pick. 1.1846 0.03905 130 109 18 3
1543 Procrastination pills 1.1846 0.04055 130 110 16 4
1544 They're purebreds, but you can say you found them in some back alley. 1.1845 0.04081 103 85 17 1
1545 No pet shop overhead....I pass the savings to you! 1.1845 0.04308 103 86 15 2
1546 Looks real, but the lining is faux fur 1.1844 0.03573 141 117 22 2
1547 They're artisan pets; I hand picked them" 1.1842 0.04050 114 95 17 2
1548 Your wife won't know the difference from the real thing. 1.1842 0.04417 114 97 13 4
1549 Renew your New Yorker subscription or I'll drown your pets. 1.1842 0.04218 152 133 10 9
1550 $10 per gram, $20 for the pound. 1.1840 0.03997 125 105 17 3
1551 Oh they'll fight alright! 1.1840 0.04736 125 110 7 8
1552 SPCA black ops at your service! 1.1840 0.04156 125 106 15 4
1553 Buy local! It's small business Caturday. 1.1840 0.04156 125 106 15 4
1554 I've got a pet insurance policy I can sell you as well! 1.1838 0.03933 136 115 17 4
1555 Hey pal, can I interest you in getting me some Claritin? 1.1838 0.03792 136 114 19 3
1556 Are you interested in second hand fur cout! 1.1838 0.03933 136 115 17 4
1557 I can give you a purrfect price for a new very still pet. 1.1835 0.03946 109 90 18 1
1558 Our new summer line - genuine canine-feline . 1.1835 0.03946 109 90 18 1
1559 Real story? Some dame named Cruella had to get rid of a bunch in a hurry so they're priced to move. We got a deal or what? 1.1835 0.03946 109 90 18 1
1560 All pedigreed, good prices, no papers. 1.1835 0.04156 109 91 16 2
1561 Whenever it "rains cats and dogs", I wear this coat. 1.1833 0.04264 120 102 14 4
1562 Trust me, I guarantee these are genuine purebreds. 1.1833 0.03922 120 100 18 2
1563 For an extra $50 I'll neuter it for you right now. 1.1833 0.03922 120 100 18 2
1564 Get your emotional support puppy here! 1.1833 0.04264 120 102 14 4
1565 The MySockPuppet Man before he discovered pillows 1.1833 0.04264 120 102 14 4
1566 Okay I’ve got a rescue special: good girls are free, good boys also free, I just need to see a note from your landlord. 1.1833 0.04097 120 101 16 3
1567 Guaranteed to take a cute pic and keep on licking! 1.1833 0.04581 120 104 10 6
1568 Is your sweetheart a cat person or a dog person? 1.1833 0.04264 120 102 14 4
1569 Neutered them myself 1.1833 0.03922 120 100 18 2
1570 Ultimately, it's a choice between kitty litter and poop bags. 1.1833 0.03922 120 100 18 2
1571 “Do I ever empty their pouches? Why do you ask?” 1.1833 0.03922 120 100 18 2
1572 The pandemic really changed me. 1.1833 0.04425 120 103 12 5
1573 Of course they’re house broken! My girlfriend would have moved out if they weren’t. 1.1832 0.03723 131 109 20 2
1574 Meet the Santos family. 1.1832 0.04308 131 113 12 6
1575 And this one from Paris 1.1832 0.03877 131 110 18 3
1576 I'm a purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrvert! 1.1827 0.04270 104 87 15 2
1577 That's OK. Almost all of my customers have been rejected by the adoption shelters. 1.1826 0.04018 115 96 17 2
1578 Each one is an original. No copies here. 1.1826 0.04204 115 97 15 3
1579 I got these from Johnny Depp. 1.1826 0.04204 115 97 15 3
1580 They’ve all been rescued from breeders 1.1826 0.04381 115 98 13 4
1581 For just three, easy payments of $19.95, unconditional love can be yours. 1.1826 0.03823 115 95 19 1
1582 No microchip. Guaranteed untraceable. 1.1826 0.03823 115 95 19 1
1583 A designer pet to go with the designer watch you bought from the guy across the street? 1.1825 0.04276 126 108 13 5
1584 You must be barking if you think you’ll find a better deal 1.1825 0.03968 126 106 17 3
1585 Pick any one,next one is complimentary. 1.1825 0.03968 126 106 17 3
1586 It was raining cats. 1.1825 0.04276 126 108 13 5
1587 I only fence the dogs. 1.1825 0.04173 137 118 13 6
1588 Better in your home than in a Chinese Food restaurant." This is obviously not going in the magazine 1.1825 0.03907 137 116 17 4
1589 First one's free. 1.1824 0.03663 159 135 19 5
1590 Ten bucks for the whole kit n kapoodle. 1.1818 0.04391 121 104 12 5
1591 Whadya got? Gophers or rats? 1.1818 0.04319 110 93 14 3
1592 I’ve got Xanax, Wellbutrin, Adderall, and Ozempic. No returns! Go to the nearest ASPCA if your dosage is wrong. 1.1818 0.03697 132 110 20 2
1593 Buy 1 Get 1 Free 1.1818 0.04319 110 93 14 3
1594 I know they made this illegal after the pandemic , but they also they need a home 1.1818 0.03998 132 112 16 4
1595 Helllloooo, Kitty! 1.1818 0.04121 110 92 16 2
1596 Yessir, genuine Alley Cats! 1.1812 0.03598 138 115 21 2
1597 BOGO is your best deal! 1.1812 0.03598 138 115 21 2
1598 Would you like a peta-pocket? 1.1812 0.03881 138 117 17 4
1599 As you can clearly see, they're paper and litter trained. 1.1812 0.03881 138 117 17 4
1600 Guaranteed unregistered. 1.1812 0.03881 138 117 17 4
1601 I got a line on doodles, too. 1.1811 0.03778 127 106 19 2
1602 Hey buddy, interested in a clichéd TV trope with an adorable twist? 1.1811 0.04095 127 108 15 4
1603 C’mon, you’re killing me. They’re housebroken. 1.1811 0.03940 127 107 17 3
1604 Guaranteed reliable for 5A every morning! 1.1810 0.04515 116 100 11 5
1605 Buy all four and you get my coat free as a carrying case. 1.1810 0.03986 116 97 17 2
1606 Wristwatches? They’re on the sidewalk, two doors down, next to ladies handbags. 1.1810 0.04515 116 100 11 5
1607 It's the latest craze, kid. Pocket Pets -- no two alike. And they're guaranteed or your money back! 1.1810 0.03591 116 95 21 0
1608 These things can tell the time too. 1.1810 0.04838 105 91 9 5
1609 They come from a blended litter…. 1.1810 0.04444 105 89 13 3
1610 Sure, I'm a guy in an alley wearing a trench coat, but I'm also anti-litter. 1.1810 0.04645 105 90 11 4
1611 How d’ya like these puppies? 1.1810 0.04232 105 88 15 2
1612 How do I know you're not wearing a Wire-haired? 1.1805 0.03824 133 112 18 3
1613 Look, I'm runnin' late, they're starting to pee... 75% off! 1.1805 0.03824 133 112 18 3
1614 Of course they’re purebred! 1.1805 0.04111 133 114 14 5
1615 Therapy at reasonable price! 1.1803 0.04199 122 104 14 4
1616 It's raining savings at Cats and Dogs Emporium! Each purr-fect companion is completely wireless, make no bones about it! I do recommend using a stylus, however, since some of the feline models keep eating the computer mice... 1.1803 0.04658 122 107 8 7
1617 They're all ASPCA approved! 1.1803 0.04199 122 104 14 4
1618 No office means no overhead, and no overhead means I can offer a discerning consumer like you, the best deal on pets in the city. 1.1803 0.04035 122 103 16 3
1619 If you want your influencer career to take off. 1.1802 0.04283 111 94 14 3
1620 2-for-1 pandemic pets for sale! 1.1802 0.04650 111 96 10 5
1621 You are a “pet a file” and you are under arrest . You have the right to remain silent …. 1.1802 0.04283 111 94 14 3
1622 Honest to God, these are real tigers and timber wolves. 1.1802 0.04650 111 96 10 5
1623 ...and they've all had their shots! 1.1802 0.04470 111 95 12 4
1624 It's the variety pack! 1.1802 0.03882 111 92 18 1
1625 Wanna score some dopamine hits? 1.1802 0.04283 111 94 14 3
1626 Looking for a way to save your relationship, huh? 1.1802 0.04470 111 95 12 4
1627 These ain’t no mutts. They’re 100% designer. 1.1800 0.04579 100 85 12 3
1628 Besides walking around the city in your pajamas all day you could further annoy people by insisting on telling them your pet is a rescue. 1.1800 0.03672 150 127 19 4
1629 We couldn't keep these on the shelf during COVID. 1.1799 0.03717 139 117 19 3
1630 Cute is the new opioid. 1.1797 0.04358 128 111 11 6
1631 Want to buy a minimally-used kitten or puppy for your highly profitable YouTube Channel? 1.1797 0.04065 128 109 15 4
1632 I got 'em cute. I got 'em cuddly. If you really want, I can get one not cute at all, but will rip the face off of any annoying neighbor. 1.1797 0.03751 128 107 19 2
1633 Trust me; one o' these on a string get you laid faster than you ever imaged! 1.1797 0.04358 128 111 11 6
1634 No one gives a shit about Art 1.1797 0.04065 128 109 15 4
1635 "These are certified AKC Adjacent and ready for Westminster!" 1.1797 0.03911 128 108 17 3
1636 And guaranteed ethnically diverse and made in America. 1.1795 0.04137 117 99 15 3
1637 They'll keep you warm in the winter, and when they die, you can eat them. 1.1795 0.04312 117 100 13 4
1638 One of these will wake you at 5:30 sharp! 1.1795 0.04312 117 100 13 4
1639 Of COURSE they work, just like that watch I sold ya. 1.1795 0.04312 117 100 13 4
1640 It really did rain cats and dogs and luckily I wore the perfect coat! 1.1795 0.04137 117 99 15 3
1641 I can also get you some farm animals. But they're in my longer coat. 1.1795 0.03955 117 98 17 2
1642 $20 without fleas, $10 with. 1.1795 0.03955 117 98 17 2
1643 Buy any three, I'll throw in a book on juggling! 1.1795 0.04137 117 99 15 3
1644 They're great for picking up chicks. 1.1793 0.04229 145 127 10 8
1645 Until last week, I sold watches. Then, the market turned. 1.1792 0.04604 106 91 11 4
1646 I gotta rescue for ya. 1.1792 0.04405 106 90 13 3
1647 This little kitty’s name is ‘Batta Bing, Batta Boom. 1.1792 0.04604 106 91 11 4
1648 I’m out of Zoloft. But can I interest you in a domestic? 1.1792 0.03976 106 88 17 1
1649 Trust me. Walking with a cute puppy in a park will put an end to your single life. 1.1791 0.03798 134 113 18 3
1650 Looking to pet. One pet $5, two pets $8. Cats are extra 1.1791 0.03943 134 114 16 4
1651 Of course they’re decoys! But these are PERFECT copycats. Nobody will ever know the difference. Buy one right now and I’ll throw in the fake rabies shot for free. 1.1789 0.04623 123 108 8 7
1652 They'll sew right on, nobody likes lifeless slippers! 1.1789 0.03835 123 103 18 2
1653 Okay, it’s a little weird, but at least I don’t wear socks with my Oofos. 1.1789 0.04005 123 104 16 3
1654 And they are all rescue puppets! 1.1789 0.04005 123 104 16 3
1655 Can I interest you in a genuine Whiskers or Fido? 1.1789 0.03835 123 103 18 2
1656 I used to be a dog walker. 1.1786 0.03635 112 92 20 0
1657 Wanna buy a slightly used pet? 1.1786 0.04247 112 95 14 3
1658 Nah, I'm not selling those broken pets anymore—I promise all of these beauties are fixed. 1.1786 0.04054 112 94 16 2
1659 This one pure snow dog for $1200 and this one is cut with Doodle for $1450 1.1786 0.03635 112 92 20 0
1660 This is the good stuff, kid. Non-GMO! 1.1783 0.04036 129 110 15 4
1661 Yeah, they're knock-offs, but they're just as cute. 1.1783 0.03724 129 108 19 2
1662 I’ll pay you 50 bucks to take one off my hands. 1.1783 0.03724 129 108 19 2
1663 Got different kinds of antidepressant 1.1783 0.04184 129 111 13 5
1664 Il give you the purrfect discount 1.1780 0.03924 118 99 17 2
1665 Yes, friend, 100% guaranteed AKC/TICA purebreds. I've got their papers in my other pocket. 1.1780 0.03536 118 97 21 0
1666 You better not be paw enforcement! 1.1780 0.03924 118 99 17 2
1667 It was on a winning streak. I won all of the kitties. Then they threw in a few pups. 1.1780 0.03924 118 99 17 2
1668 Today's Special, GOGO (Buy One Get One) Free! 1.1780 0.03924 118 99 17 2
1669 My wife got me this overcoat. Real fur-lined. 1.1780 0.04278 118 101 13 4
1670 Purebreds! Every one of 'em! Straight from Westminster! 1.1778 0.03915 135 115 16 4
1671 They tell me it gets a little ruff in here sometimes but mostly it's purrfectly cozy 1.1776 0.03628 152 129 19 4
1672 Each is guaranteed to provide a substitute for human companionship pre-, post-, and mid- pandemic. 1.1776 0.04367 107 91 13 3
1673 Cat got your tongue? 1.1776 0.04753 107 93 9 5
1674 You wanna start a highly co-dependent relationship at a low "no questions asked" price? 1.1776 0.04160 107 90 15 2
1675 Buy one, get three free ! 1.1774 0.03806 124 104 18 2
1676 I've had three people express an interest already 1.1774 0.04136 124 106 14 4
1677 For legal reasons these are actually "puppees" and "kittans". 1.1774 0.04136 124 106 14 4
1678 The ark is full this trip. 1.1774 0.04292 124 107 12 5
1679 I got 'em in pink too 1.1774 0.04136 124 106 14 4
1680 You wouldn't believe the cost to dry clean this trench coat. 1.1773 0.03528 141 118 21 2
1681 They always start with just one.. 1.1773 0.03669 141 119 19 3
1682 Best way to attract the ladies, my friend! 1.1773 0.03528 141 118 21 2
1683 Psst. Hey, Bud, wanna buy a genuine Westminster Kennel Club champ? 1.1773 0.03804 141 120 17 4
1684 Buy one and get the second one for 50 percent off! 1.1771 0.04682 96 82 11 3
1685 The first cuddle is free. 1.1770 0.04021 113 95 16 2
1686 Hey, bud--c'mere. Wanna buy a pet? 1.1770 0.04572 113 98 10 5
1687 Wanna buy a hot dog? 1.1770 0.04396 113 97 12 4
1688 Have I got some chick magnets for you. Guaranteed! 1.1770 0.04572 113 98 10 5
1689 Here’s the deal: pay cash, no clause. 1.1770 0.04396 113 97 12 4
1690 Excuse me sir - are you in your 30's, broke, and morbidly depressed? What if I told you I could change your life in 60 seconds? 1.1770 0.04021 113 95 16 2
1691 Okay,then. Would you be interested in buying the naming rights? 1.1769 0.03856 130 110 17 3
1692 Just wait til you see what I have under my other arm! 1.1769 0.03698 130 109 19 2
1693 Pet-a-Porter? 1.1769 0.04007 130 111 15 4
1694 Gotta keep up with the times. Watches ran out of theirs. 1.1769 0.03856 130 110 17 3
1695 They’re all rescues. 1.1765 0.03894 119 100 17 2
1696 I also got some goldfish and a couple of Koi, just let me get my Thermos and I'll show you 1.1765 0.04026 136 117 14 5
1697 Sure, it's unconventional, but you should see my Yelp reviews. 1.1765 0.03894 119 100 17 2
1698 They get along with each other. Imagine how well one would get along with you. 1.1765 0.04041 102 85 16 1
1699 Uhmm not exactly what I was looking for .. 1.1765 0.03894 119 100 17 2
1700 You can tell all the ladies that you rescued a purebred from an alley. 1.1765 0.03894 119 100 17 2
1701 Pedigree Jacket-Russell right here. 1.1765 0.04496 102 87 12 3
1702 You said you wanted to wake up early for the foreseeable future. 1.1765 0.03894 119 100 17 2
1703 I'm getting closer, it's the snuggling I can't bottle. 1.1765 0.04496 102 87 12 3
1704 Fresh from last week's Midwest rainstorms." 1.1765 0.04073 119 101 15 3
1705 Unlike watches, these are the real deal". Curt Wyffels, Plymouth, M 1.1765 0.04073 119 101 15 3
1706 I can also get you some unregistered automatic weapons. 1.1765 0.03894 119 100 17 2
1707 Get your best watch dog cheap. Kittens are free! 1.1765 0.03723 153 131 17 5
1708 *Of course* they are already toilet-trained. 1.1765 0.04567 119 104 9 6
1709 I can give you a great price on these sleeping bags. 1.1760 0.03604 125 104 20 1
1710 Paired pup ‘n pussy, potty-trained 1.1760 0.03945 125 106 16 3
1711 And they said not to get happy on your own supply 1.1760 0.03945 125 106 16 3
1712 Trust me, I'm a paw-lice officer. 1.1760 0.03945 125 106 16 3
1713 Each one comes with a five year warranty! 1.1759 0.03909 108 90 17 1
1714 Yeah, you can't get these poopless ones at the pet store...honest. 1.1759 0.04712 108 94 9 5
1715 They are great copies of the ones with pedigrees 1.1756 0.03829 131 111 17 3
1716 No, the only one who's liable to get collared is them! 1.1754 0.04178 114 97 14 3
1717 The Governor just banned cuteness. 1.1754 0.03988 114 96 16 2
1718 Don't worry, my jacket lining is faux fur. 1.1754 0.03988 114 96 16 2
1719 The girls love them! 1.1754 0.03789 114 95 18 1
1720 Nobody wears watches nowadays. 1.1754 0.04360 114 98 12 4
1721 They're cute, they're friendly, and they fit in your pocket 1.1754 0.04178 114 97 14 3
1722 The love is wholesale not retail 1.1754 0.03988 114 96 16 2
1723 Genuine rescues - the first ones free. 1.1754 0.04178 114 97 14 3
1724 Looking to buzz on Tik Tok ? I got you 1.1754 0.04535 114 99 10 5
1725 If you are looking for a cool room mate choose a cat. The dogs are like taking care of two year old kids 1.1752 0.04383 137 121 8 8
1726 The puppies come with papers. 1.1752 0.03999 137 118 14 5
1727 Wanna buy a purr-tner or a pupcicle 1.1750 0.04211 120 103 13 4
1728 This one has over 47,000 "likes" on Instagram. 1.1750 0.04374 120 104 11 5
1729 I’llgive you one if you follow me to my van! 1.1750 0.04374 120 104 11 5
1730 C’mon the first one is free! 1.1750 0.04211 120 103 13 4
1731 Yeah, I used to do watches, but there's more money in this. 1.1748 0.03621 143 121 19 3
1732 I've gotta deal for you…imported straight from St. Kitts. 1.1748 0.04005 103 86 16 1
1733 Of course they're cheap! I've got a cuteness overload! 1.1746 0.04075 126 108 14 4
1734 These are gently used but they are up to date on their vaccinations. 1.1746 0.03751 126 106 18 2
1735 Buy all four and get 50% off. 1.1746 0.03916 126 107 16 3
1736 Can't sleep? Walk one of these. 1.1746 0.04075 126 108 14 4
1737 It started raining really hard and guess what? 1.1746 0.03751 126 106 18 2
1738 I got kitty cats, doggy dogs, and if you’re more of a frog guy, I got this here pocket fulla dem pollywogs. 1.1746 0.04376 126 110 10 6
1739 Anddddd my underwears and socks are full of treats for sale 1.1746 0.03916 126 107 16 3
1740 As adoption prices have gone through the roof, Greg has turned to the streets. 1.1743 0.04292 109 93 13 3
1741 I also have crack 1.1743 0.04850 109 96 7 6
1742 Can I interest you in some Russian Blue or a little Chow Chow? 1.1743 0.04292 109 93 13 3
1743 Not only are they purebred, these little bubbies will also help you remember to wash your jacket every 72 hours. 1.1743 0.03876 109 91 17 1
1744 Besides its artstic value, it will remind you to take an umbrella1 1.1742 0.03951 132 113 15 4
1745 Pick a Pet? 1.1742 0.04095 132 114 13 5
1746 You'll never lose your keys again with one of these. 1.1742 0.03951 132 113 15 4
1747 Going to the game? I've got what you need to tail-gate. 1.1742 0.03951 132 113 15 4
1748 It is soooo warm and PETA approved. 1.1739 0.04498 115 100 10 5
1749 Fresh from the best backyards in America! 1.1739 0.03759 115 96 18 1
1750 I use to be a slimy guy now I went straight but couldn't give up the jacket thing! 1.1739 0.04145 115 98 14 3
1751 Are you a dog person or a cat person? 1.1739 0.04325 115 99 12 4
1752 Of course they have tails and feet in back 1.1739 0.04145 115 98 14 3
1753 Need a seratonin fix? This puppy will last you years 1.1739 0.03759 115 96 18 1
1754 felineophile? canineophile? got both ! 1.1739 0.04145 115 98 14 3
1755 Guaranteed chick magnet. 1.1739 0.03956 115 97 16 2
1756 If you want beanie babies, see Maxie on Broadway. 1.1739 0.03696 138 117 18 3
1757 They come with original finish and ten thousand smile guarantee. Jean Godden, Seattle, Wa. 1.1739 0.03956 115 97 16 2
1758 Look here buddy, want to see some hot dogs and hip cats? 1.1739 0.03759 115 96 18 1
1759 I got the best alarm clocks on the market. 1.1739 0.03972 138 119 14 5
1760 You gotta buy the whole menagerie. It’s a therapy coat. 1.1736 0.03457 121 100 21 0
1761 Ialso have them in meerkat 1.1736 0.03835 121 102 17 2
1762 But wait, there's more... Each kitten comes with a bag of pot from the other side of my raincoat. 1.1736 0.03835 121 102 17 2
1763 Each one is 100% pedigreed, guaranteed potty-trained, and won't scratch or mark furniture. And just for you, I'm including a free genuine Rolex watch. 1.1736 0.04340 121 105 11 5
1764 …they are all house trained and can join your workforce immediately 1.1736 0.04340 121 105 11 5
1765 The iguanas, snakes and other reptiles are on the right side. 1.1732 0.04197 127 110 12 5
1766 These doggies, waggeldy tails like no other. And these kittens, would you believe they've already lost their mittens. 1.1732 0.04343 127 111 10 6
1767 Hey buddy, got hot dogs for sale. 1.1732 0.03888 127 108 16 3
1768 They’re incredibly lethal. You’d usually only find them on the dark web! 1.1732 0.03724 127 107 18 2
1769 They’re a cross breed. Their mother is a kangaroo. 1.1732 0.04197 127 110 12 5
1770 No, seriously, this is my rain coat. 1.1731 0.04622 104 90 10 4
1771 Okay, let's bring back the writers and actors. 1.1731 0.03970 104 87 16 1
1772 The endorphin high you get from them lasts much longer than the stuff you're used to. 1.1731 0.04415 104 89 12 3
1773 Psssp,psssp,psssp. 1.1729 0.03923 133 114 15 4
1774 Why settle for a high-cost and high-maintenance purebred, when you can have a care-free and free-range orphan? 1.1727 0.04055 110 93 15 2
1775 I graduated from watches. 1.1727 0.03621 110 91 19 0
1776 Believe me they're more valuable than watches. Some of these are watch dogs! 1.1727 0.04256 110 94 13 3
1777 Yeah, they're free. But if you want one that's wearing a Rolex, that'll be 50 bucks. 1.1727 0.04631 110 96 9 5
1778 Other dealers get direct insults, but I just keep catching strays. 1.1724 0.03925 116 98 16 2
1779 Take a guess: Hunter Biden, Bob Dylan, or my first grade son. 1.1724 0.04112 116 99 14 3
1780 Can I interest you in a cool cat or a hot dog? 1.1724 0.04290 116 100 12 4
1781 Would you rather get high tonight, or STAY high for the next 10-15 years? 1.1724 0.04112 116 99 14 3
1782 One of these has your tongue. 1.1724 0.04112 116 99 14 3
1783 Think super-cute pet--and social-media enhancer. 1.1724 0.03729 116 97 18 1
1784 Take your pick of the litter. 1.1724 0.04112 116 99 14 3
1785 Let me cut you a real nice deal on this sustainable, fur-lined coat. It’s a little scratchy, but it will keep you warm. 1.1724 0.03925 116 98 16 2
1786 Hey buddy, wanna get frisky? 1.1722 0.03357 151 127 22 2
1787 And the best part? Your fix is fixed. 1.1721 0.04147 122 105 13 4
1788 You wanna feel whimsy, kid? You wanna get joyful as hell? 1.1721 0.03806 122 103 17 2
1789 Colombian gold. 100% Purebred. 1.1721 0.04147 122 105 13 4
1790 *in the arms of angels begins playing* 1.1721 0.04462 122 107 9 6
1791 I have pigeons just around the corner too. 1.1719 0.04016 128 110 14 4
1792 Hey pal, these are guaranteed to go for the throat in alley fights 1.1719 0.03860 128 109 16 3
1793 I got a lot more exotic than this, if yer interested. 1.1719 0.04016 128 110 14 4
1794 And there's plenty more where these came from... 1.1717 0.04549 99 85 11 3
1795 Hand over your wallet or the kitten gets it! 1.1717 0.04771 99 86 9 4
1796 Knock off support pets. Make you a deal 1.1716 0.03896 134 115 15 4
1797 Early adopters of FurbieGTP 4.0 1.1716 0.03749 134 114 17 3
1798 Your kid will never know the difference. 1.1714 0.04581 105 91 10 4
1799 Covid leftovers. Cheap! 1.1714 0.03919 140 121 14 5
1800 Here's your ticket to limbo. 1.1714 0.04777 105 92 8 5
1801 They look and feel real - and they are animated by Chat-PET 1.1714 0.04162 105 89 14 2
1802 Credit cards are accepted for these little cuties. 1.1712 0.04022 111 94 15 2
1803 You better buy one, or I’ll give them all to your kid. 1.1712 0.04592 111 97 9 5
1804 Give you a GOAT deal? Next you will think I'm a Kangaroo! 1.1712 0.04220 111 95 13 3
1805 That is not the kind of companion I was looking for. 1.1712 0.04022 111 94 15 2
1806 You’ve heard of three raccoons in a trench coat? Well, have I got a treat for YOU! 1.1712 0.03813 111 93 17 1
1807 I'm the gateway guy. 1.1709 0.04079 117 100 14 3
1808 If you're looking to devastate yourself, just buy one of these puppies and wait 10 years. 1.1709 0.04256 117 101 12 4
1809 Wanna some like on social networks? 1.1709 0.04079 117 100 14 3
1810 I told ya, I got the best mutts in town. 1.1709 0.03894 117 99 16 2
1811 They're all 'coat trained.' You can take 'em anywhere! 1.1709 0.04079 117 100 14 3
1812 Buy two get a third half price 1.1709 0.04256 117 101 12 4
1813 Vous’ aim le pussy. Non? 1.1709 0.04256 117 101 12 4
1814 I might be a career criminal, but working with the local shelter is my real passion. 1.1707 0.04115 123 106 13 4
1815 Of course I met the real Hello Kitty in Japan. 1.1707 0.03597 123 103 19 1
1816 Check ‘em out. So cute they should be illegal. 1.1707 0.04274 123 107 11 5
1817 I can I've you a Two for the price of one, but only today! 1.1705 0.03832 129 110 16 3
1818 Joe, Donald, Kamala and Ron. If you dont like any of them, come back tomorrow, i ll bring Barbie & Ken 1.1705 0.03832 129 110 16 3
1819 We can recommend your best option, if we have your psychological profile. 1.1702 0.04180 94 79 14 1
1820 It's kind of like 'catch and release' for the right price. 1.1700 0.04277 100 85 13 2
1821 Paws and claws awe the law! 1.1700 0.04507 100 86 11 3
1822 If you take all 4 animals, I'll throw in the top coat! 1.1700 0.04277 100 85 13 2
1823 The best friends money can buy! 1.1700 0.04935 100 88 7 5
1824 These babies are priced to move. 1.1698 0.04338 106 91 12 3
1825 They're fresh from the alley. 1.1698 0.04338 106 91 12 3
1826 I think you misheard, I don't sell "drugs". 1.1698 0.04540 106 92 10 4
1827 Don’t let anyone tell you fuzzy slippers aren’t cool. 1.1698 0.04540 106 92 10 4
1828 I have a rescue python in the car. 1.1698 0.04540 106 92 10 4
1829 Naw, these ain’t knockoffs, slick. These are some original fur babies. 1.1698 0.04126 106 90 14 2
1830 Heavy rain last night 1.1696 0.03781 112 94 17 1
1831 100% genuine Swiss mountain dogs. 1.1696 0.04185 112 96 13 3
1832 Pitchman to sleepwalker: " They will rescue YOU!" 1.1696 0.03988 112 95 15 2
1833 This is the only PETA-approved fur lined coat. 1.1696 0.03988 112 95 15 2
1834 What’s the problem? I said fifty for 900g of Snowball. And thirty for Mittens! 1.1696 0.04185 112 96 13 3
1835 These are the new pocket pets. Take them anywhere." 1.1695 0.03864 118 100 16 2
1836 Meet my pocket pets 1.1695 0.03864 118 100 16 2
1837 Now the cats are a little more fancy in how they wake you. 1.1695 0.04047 118 101 14 3
1838 This is to keep them dry in case it rains cats and dogs. 1.1695 0.03864 118 100 16 2
1839 Diamonds are “No Longer” a girls best friend! 1.1695 0.04552 118 104 8 6
1840 Hey dude, look, it’s a Dogce & Catbbana 1.1695 0.04047 118 101 14 3
1841 Check this out: Love, Joy, Happiness and A Sense of Purpose. 1.1694 0.03921 124 106 15 3
1842 Careful, these are the most addictive ones I've got. 1.1694 0.03921 124 106 15 3
1843 I also charge 16 cents a day, but you don't have to listen to Sarah McLachlan 1.1694 0.04242 124 108 11 5
1844 Hey buddy, if you get the hot dog I’ll throw in a cool cat 1.1694 0.03750 124 105 17 2
1845 Choose your breed, all of them are house wrecker guaranteed 1.1694 0.03921 124 106 15 3
1846 Better than drugs! 1.1694 0.03570 124 104 19 1
1847 Word to the wise. Don't show up empty-handed at grandma's. 1.1694 0.03921 124 106 15 3
1848 You wouldn't believe how well pet-knapping pays 1.1692 0.03805 130 111 16 3
1849 No,these are not knock-offs! 1.1692 0.03477 130 109 20 1
1850 If you take them, you'll need a fence. 1.1692 0.04249 130 114 10 6
1851 If it’s rain you want, I’m your guy. 1.1692 0.03805 130 111 16 3
1852 See? My pets all have nice shiny coats. 1.1684 0.04650 95 82 10 3
1853 Guaranteed by the AKC and the CFA 1.1684 0.04402 95 81 12 2
1854 Who needs Gucci when you can get an authentic poochie or a Coochi-coo kitty? 1.1684 0.04140 95 80 14 1
1855 And they tell time, too. 1.1684 0.04140 95 80 14 1
1856 They're guaranteed fresh, they're hypoallergenic, and they're proudly made in the U.S.A. 1.1684 0.04650 95 82 10 3
1857 Would some adorable, infected animals interest you? 1.1682 0.04300 107 92 12 3
1858 Cat dog or dogcat 1.1682 0.03868 107 90 16 1
1859 Have you seen Mac or Muff? 1.1682 0.04090 107 91 14 2
1860 I'll give you a good deal. Next week I have to get a new coat. 1.1682 0.04090 107 91 14 2
1861 They’re not as happy as they look 1.1681 0.04337 113 98 11 4
1862 Psst! Wanna buy a real life emoji? 1.1681 0.04337 113 98 11 4
1863 Which is your dopamine of choice? 1.1681 0.04337 113 98 11 4
1864 This breed is the cat’s meow. 1.1681 0.04337 113 98 11 4
1865 Your best deal is $10 for the whole lot. 1.1681 0.04015 119 102 14 3
1866 Sure the cats can be aloof. But nine lives... That's a lot of cuddles! 1.1681 0.04015 119 102 14 3
1867 AND THIS kitten is still alive, but you have to act fast,before, ya' know 1.1681 0.04015 119 102 14 3
1868 Are you a cat person or a dog person? 1.1681 0.03834 119 101 16 2
1869 Sorry the coat doesn't come with puppies and kittens. 1.1681 0.04015 119 102 14 3
1870 Don’t tell the missus! 1.1681 0.04015 119 102 14 3
1871 Please buy one. They’re suffocating.” 1.1681 0.03834 119 101 16 2
1872 No, they are NOT AKC registered.” 1.1681 0.04015 119 102 14 3
1873 Yes, I accept doge coins. 1.1681 0.04015 119 102 14 3
1874 Best lookin’ purebred knockoffs you’ll find to keep your feet warm at night! 1.1680 0.04210 125 109 11 5
1875 You thought you were signing adoption papers for actual kids, didn’t you 1.1680 0.04210 125 109 11 5
1876 I thought New York had already shown me everything. 1.1680 0.04054 125 108 13 4
1877 Here they are, great set, all from the same litter! 1.1679 0.04077 131 114 12 5
1878 Buddy, it’s your lucky day, it’s a 2 fur 1 special! Kelley Hawkins, San Jose, CA 1.1679 0.03816 137 118 15 4
1879 Not quite what I meant by needing a “watch” 1.1677 0.03864 155 136 12 7
1880 Listen, you don’t want a marmot. I got what you need right here. 1.1667 0.04648 114 101 7 6
1881 C'mon, buddy, don't you want to feel good all the time? 1.1667 0.03961 102 86 15 1
1882 Buy two, and I’ll throw in the trouser snake for free! 1.1667 0.04328 126 111 9 6
1883 Guaranteed to wake you at 6 AM! 1.1667 0.04117 114 98 13 3
1884 I'll cut you a deal: take Whiskers and I'll throw the rest in for free. 1.1667 0.03708 102 85 17 0
1885 They will all poop on your parents' bed. 1.1667 0.03902 132 114 14 4
1886 Feeelthy felines, Monsieur? 1.1667 0.04117 114 98 13 3
1887 Guaranteed not to whine or hiss for 3 full months! 1.1667 0.03924 114 97 15 2
1888 Hey buddy, it ain't raining cats and dogs anymore... 1.1667 0.04263 108 93 12 3
1889 I have a coat here that's guaranteed to keep you warm in the winter. 1.1667 0.03603 108 90 18 0
1890 It's not easy to find two matched sets. 1.1667 0.04156 120 104 12 4
1891 Who needs Instagram?" 1.1667 0.04263 108 93 12 3
1892 Its all that rain we've been getting. 1.1667 0.04055 108 92 14 2
1893 And... they make great pets! 1.1667 0.04424 102 88 11 3
1894 So, do you want Weed, Mary Jane, Reefer, or little Ganja here? 1.1667 0.03616 120 101 18 1
1895 I picked them up when it was raining. 1.1667 0.04321 120 105 10 5
1896 Believe it or not, I stole these little cuties from a watch shop. 1.1667 0.03695 126 107 17 2
1897 They’re all hand crafted in Switzerland. Honest! 1.1667 0.04604 96 83 10 3
1898 Why deprive yourself of companionship just because you're on a work trip? 1.1667 0.03924 114 97 15 2
1899 Pocket Pals. Buy one, Get one for free 1.1667 0.04461 108 94 10 4
1900 They will guarantee you get 10,000 steps a day and give you unconditional love. 1.1667 0.03416 120 100 20 0
1901 A high like no other. Guaranteed! 1.1667 0.04639 102 89 9 4
1902 Paper trained. No refunds. No exchanges. 1.1667 0.03804 120 102 16 2
1903 No breeding, no pedigree, pure mutts… they’re all the rage 1.1667 0.04117 114 98 13 3
1904 On the other hand, I do have some nude pictures of your wife. 1.1655 0.03765 139 120 15 4
1905 If you close your eyes they taste just like veal. 1.1654 0.03875 133 115 14 4
1906 I've also got parrots and canaries in other pockets. 1.1654 0.03834 127 109 15 3
1907 Naw, don’t do watches anymore, too many cell phones. 1.1654 0.03834 127 109 15 3
1908 The inevitable consequence of closing all the pet stores. 1.1654 0.03994 127 110 13 4
1909 Adopt one or they will chase you down this alley and it won’t be pretty! 1.1654 0.03668 127 108 17 2
1910 If you were here yesterday I could have shown you my wiener 1.1654 0.03994 127 110 13 4
1911 This isn't AI buddy. It's the real thing 1.1653 0.03953 121 104 14 3
1912 The shit is guaranteed. 1.1653 0.04445 121 107 8 6
1913 The Rest Go To The Pound 1.1653 0.04288 121 106 10 5
1914 Hey, you look like a smart guy. How about a great deal on a knock-off pick of the litter? 1.1653 0.03953 121 104 14 3
1915 Of Course they're smiling! I liberated them from Discount Donny's Pet Euthanization Service. 1.1653 0.04124 121 105 12 4
1916 Need something to put hair on your chest? 1.1653 0.04124 121 105 12 4
1917 It’ll change the way you think about pockets 1.1652 0.03892 115 98 15 2
1918 I got your companion pets right here, letter and everything. Real cheap. You won’t see a better deal 1.1652 0.04083 115 99 13 3
1919 They’re much lighter than stealing TVs. 1.1652 0.04083 115 99 13 3
1920 It's perfect whenever it rains cats and dogs! 1.1651 0.04226 109 94 12 3
1921 Brand new!-Got'em on "freshpet.com" 1.1651 0.04020 109 93 14 2
1922 I needed a new angle. Everybody has cell phones, so who wants a cheap wristwatch? 1.1651 0.03803 109 92 16 1
1923 Lady Gaga’s is going to cost you extra. 1.1651 0.04423 109 95 10 4
1924 Bark Market Prozac 1.1651 0.04020 109 93 14 2
1925 I see that you're a man impeccable taste. 1.1650 0.04596 103 90 9 4
1926 Buy them as a set and they can sing "Hallelujah" by Leonard Cohen 1.1650 0.04799 103 91 7 5
1927 So legally i can’t sell you drugs but I can gift them, so if you buy this kitty for $5000 I can’t give you that pound of heroin as a “present” 1.1650 0.04384 103 89 11 3
1928 And these little puppies will keep you up all night. 1.1650 0.03676 103 86 17 0
1929 They’re genuine roll-xes, guaranteed to wake you up in the morning like clockwork. 1.1650 0.03926 103 87 15 1
1930 And this little guy understands seven languages! 1.1650 0.04161 103 88 13 2
1931 As seen on TikTok … 1.1650 0.04161 103 88 13 2
1932 Are you interested in my happiness drugs? 1.1650 0.04384 103 89 11 3
1933 What, were you expecting watches? 1.1649 0.04560 97 84 10 3
1934 Call me the Pet Whisperer. Saving the day, one snuggle at a time! 1.1644 0.03640 146 126 16 4
1935 Discount? Sure. My rainy-day inventory reduction sale. 1.1642 0.03848 134 116 14 4
1936 They're in witness protection, so no papers, no problem. 1.1642 0.03699 134 115 16 3
1937 Woof you like one meow? 1.1641 0.04117 128 112 11 5
1938 Part of our backalley rebranding. Is your confidence restored yet? 1.1641 0.03807 128 110 15 3
1939 These are NOT counterfeits! 1.1639 0.04255 122 107 10 5
1940 Psst. Dirty pets. 1.1639 0.04255 122 107 10 5
1941 Soft, cuddly, and they're toilet trained, too!! 1.1639 0.03747 122 104 16 2
1942 I rescued them when they fell off a truck. 1.1638 0.03861 116 99 15 2
1943 And they get more beautiful over time. 1.1638 0.04232 116 101 11 4
1944 Do I sell Columbian? No but I sell Pomeranian 1.1638 0.03451 116 97 19 0
1945 If you replace your watch with this cat you'll never confuse day for night again. 1.1638 0.04051 116 100 13 3
1946 interested? 1.1638 0.03861 116 99 15 2
1947 If you buy all four, we'll throw a big one at no charge to you. 1.1638 0.03662 116 98 17 1
1948 I have cats in my coat!! Haha 1.1638 0.04051 116 100 13 3
1949 inside pets for inside people 1.1638 0.04051 116 100 13 3
1950 Oh, they’re not for sale. I just ran out of leashes. 1.1636 0.03771 110 93 16 1
1951 Of course they aren’t knock-offs! 1.1636 0.04385 110 96 10 4
1952 These are all legit street finds. Why pay those pet store exorbitant prices? 1.1636 0.03986 110 94 14 2
1953 You pick the right one you get a free “I’ve adopted” t-shirt. 1.1636 0.04190 110 95 12 3
1954 They'll puke up the watch in 6 hours. 1.1636 0.03986 110 94 14 2
1955 Mix or match any two for $5. 1.1636 0.03986 110 94 14 2
1956 Smart phones really did a number on my business 1.1636 0.04190 110 95 12 3
1957 The sign said no littering. I'm just being a good neighbor. 1.1635 0.04345 104 90 11 3
1958 Tested and purebred. 1.1635 0.04555 104 91 9 4
1959 You want to feel great tonight? This is the stuff you need. 1.1635 0.03891 104 88 15 1
1960 Four for the price of two! 1.1635 0.04555 104 91 9 4
1961 If you don't like these, I have about twenty more just like them at home. 1.1635 0.04124 104 89 13 2
1962 I take cryptocurrency.' 1.1635 0.04124 104 89 13 2
1963 All of these babies are nearly extinct. 1.1635 0.04555 104 91 9 4
1964 They will snuggle with you and tell you the correct time, no batteries needed. 1.1635 0.04124 104 89 13 2
1965 Buy one, buy 'em all! Hottest collectibles to date! 1.1635 0.03891 104 88 15 1
1966 I uphold electroshock therapy, but I think the inbred lab truly compensates the involuntary treatment. 1.1635 0.04124 104 89 13 2
1967 Yeah, they come with papers - to pee on. 1.1635 0.04345 104 90 11 3
1968 While Fido's great for that initial rush of a high, Whiskers here will mellow you out and take the edge of the inevitable come down 1.1635 0.03891 104 88 15 1
1969 You heard me right, $10,000 per kitten. Iranian sanctions have spiked the Persian market, what can I tell ya, buddy? 1.1635 0.04345 104 90 11 3
1970 For another $5.00, I'll throw in the coat. 1.1633 0.04960 98 87 6 5
1971 These ain’t no knock-offs. They actually clean up their own pee and poop. 1.1633 0.03753 98 82 16 0
1972 They're not Hello Kitty, but they're close! 1.1633 0.04023 98 83 14 1
1973 Nobody wants crack anymore. 1.1633 0.04743 98 86 8 4
1974 Rain-Jacketing Cats & Dogs. 1.1633 0.03753 98 82 16 0
1975 Fresh! From this morning's downpour! 1.1633 0.04023 98 83 14 1
1976 You’ll kill ‘em with cuteness. 1.1630 0.04447 92 79 11 2
1977 Now I'm providing a natural high! 1.1630 0.04447 92 79 11 2
1978 Certainly better than fake watches, don’t you think? 1.1630 0.03674 135 116 16 3
1979 OK sure, I have some rabbits as well. 1.1628 0.03936 129 112 13 4
1980 I call it my fur coat 1.1628 0.03779 129 111 15 3
1981 Guaranteed to be a better Anniversary gift than some expensive glittering jewelry , plus BOGO today only! 1.1626 0.03893 123 106 14 3
1982 If you take advantage of my BOGO deal, they become ‘renewable’. 1.1626 0.04061 123 107 12 4
1983 You can’t even tell the difference between these and pure breds. 1.1626 0.03893 123 106 14 3
1984 Shhh…don’t let the cat out of the bag 1.1626 0.04061 123 107 12 4
1985 Say buddy, need a friend?” 1.1624 0.03831 117 100 15 2
1986 Liberace had a jacket lining just like this 1.1624 0.04198 117 102 11 4
1987 Revenues are way up ever since I diversified. 1.1624 0.03831 117 100 15 2
1988 It's so much better than having kids! 1.1624 0.04198 117 102 11 4
1989 Psst. How would you like a new best friend? 1.1624 0.04198 117 102 11 4
1990 It's not so much they fell off the back of the truck as they ran into the rear bumper at a stop sign. 1.1624 0.03633 117 99 17 1
1991 Genuine poochie 1.1624 0.03831 117 100 15 2
1992 I can get you either one, a cat and a dog or a dog and a cat. 1.1624 0.03633 117 99 17 1
1993 ...and I will personally spay or neuter your cutie of choice, absolutely free! 1.1624 0.04198 117 102 11 4
1994 It turns out they’re also great with no pandemic attached. 1.1624 0.03831 117 100 15 2
1995 Sure, I used to be on the level as an animal control officer. Then... 1.1622 0.03740 111 94 16 1
1996 How about BOGO? 1.1622 0.04155 111 96 12 3
1997 Hey, buddy…annoyed by the clean smell of your apartment and getting too much sleep? 1.1622 0.04155 111 96 12 3
1998 Kittydoodle, doggiedoodle! Have I got a doodle for you! 1.1622 0.04348 111 97 10 4
1999 Warmest jacket I've ever owned. 1.1622 0.04348 111 97 10 4
2000 Hey buddy, interested in some dog on cat action? 1.1622 0.03740 111 94 16 1
2001 it's BOGO, CAT-O or DOGGO 1.1622 0.04155 111 96 12 3
2002 This one’s even got a second hand! 1.1622 0.03953 111 95 14 2
2003 Welcome to Pauli’s Pet Pocket Emporium! 1.1622 0.04155 111 96 12 3
2004 terrific guard dogs - genuine pit bulls! 1.1622 0.04155 111 96 12 3
2005 You won't find any better looking pets! 1.1619 0.04088 105 90 13 2
2006 Are you the guy looking for the Pettler? 1.1619 0.04088 105 90 13 2
2007 Psst. Check out these sweet babies. Genuine cuteness. Guaranteed to go viral. 1.1619 0.03857 105 89 15 1
2008 Hey buddy, need a cute animal for Instagram posts? 1.1619 0.04088 105 90 13 2
2009 People are more likely to make a purchase when I'm wearing pants." 1.1616 0.04237 99 85 12 2
2010 You look like you could use a friend 1.1616 0.04237 99 85 12 2
2011 Rainy Day Special. 1.1616 0.04473 99 86 10 3
2012 The dogs are especially excellent at telling you when it is time to wake up. 1.1616 0.03986 99 84 14 1
2013 $25 each or $75 for all 4 1.1616 0.04473 99 86 10 3
2014 No? How about a little puppy? 1.1616 0.04237 99 85 12 2
2015 You're not a rat, are ya? 1.1616 0.04473 99 86 10 3
2016 The cats will feed themselves but the dogs will walk with you! 1.1615 0.03908 130 113 13 4
2017 Purloined pups! Hot dogs! Filched felines! Kitnapped kittens! All at low, low prices! 1.1615 0.03908 130 113 13 4
2018 Persian or Chow Chow? 1.1613 0.04128 93 79 13 1
2019 Take a look at these bad puppies. 1.1613 0.03864 124 107 14 3
2020 Guaranteed purebreds 1.1613 0.03864 124 107 14 3
2021 A little something to take the edge off…and ruin your furniture. 1.1613 0.03864 124 107 14 3
2022 It’s a relic from the ‘no pets allowed’ era. 1.1610 0.04164 118 103 11 4
2023 Organic? 1.1610 0.04164 118 103 11 4
2024 Wait; four more and pay only shipping and processing. 1.1610 0.03800 118 101 15 2
2025 These cats and dogs have AI capabilities that call 911 if someone’s approaches you with malicious intent. 1.1610 0.04164 118 103 11 4
2026 I’ll eat 1 for $10, all 4 for $30” 1.1610 0.04164 118 103 11 4
2027 Guaranteed to be cute and accident free. 1.1607 0.03710 112 95 16 1
2028 Last chance before the downpour. 1.1607 0.03920 112 96 14 2
2029 The cats are feline fine, the dogs are ruff. 1.1607 0.04311 112 98 10 4
2030 They give a licking and you keep on ticking. 1.1607 0.04311 112 98 10 4
2031 Do you like the ruff stuff? Or do you like the one's that'll hit you right meow? 1.1607 0.03920 112 96 14 2
2032 Take your pick my friend: Half priced or buy one get one free. 1.1607 0.04120 112 97 12 3
2033 I flashed garter snakes in the 90's, but these are getting a really touchy-feely response. 1.1607 0.04494 112 99 8 5
2034 I’m an undercover agent and these are my Sniffles ! 1.1607 0.04120 112 97 12 3
2035 ….and, they never need winding! 1.1607 0.04120 112 97 12 3
2036 Fur real! They're more hypoallergenic than a goldfish. 1.1607 0.04311 112 98 10 4
2037 I’m making you an offer you can’t refuse! 1.1607 0.03486 112 94 18 0
2038 Herte are some girls that will totally obey your wishes but can never consult an attorney. 1.1604 0.04268 106 92 11 3
2039 No sorry, not in winter. These keep me warmer. 1.1604 0.04052 106 91 13 2
2040 Pure Pedigree! 1.1604 0.04268 106 92 11 3
2041 The last time I wore this coat it was raining cats and dogs! 1.1604 0.04052 106 91 13 2
2042 This, my depressed friend, is the secret to happiness! 1.1604 0.04052 106 91 13 2
2043 Bringing the pets definitely improves the workout! 1.1604 0.03581 106 89 17 0
2044 Real cure to cancer right here. Black Market because of Big Pharma. 1.1604 0.03824 106 90 15 1
2045 Just think of it as a valuable opportunity to invest in your sense of responsibility. 1.1604 0.04268 106 92 11 3
2046 Guaranteed love and affection for the next 15 years...20 tops. 1.1604 0.03824 106 90 15 1
2047 Free to good home. Handling charge $100 1.1603 0.03880 131 114 13 4
2048 Hey buddy, wanna watch? 1.1603 0.03564 131 112 17 2
2049 They quit when Musk told them they had to work twice the hours because they had four legs. 1.1603 0.04028 131 115 11 5
2050 The fur jacket just wasn’t cutting it. 1.1603 0.04028 131 115 11 5
2051 I'm tell'n ya I found 'em after that last strong rainstorm. 1.1603 0.03880 131 114 13 4
2052 Half the price of a rescue and no one will know the difference 1.1600 0.04431 100 87 10 3
2053 Guaranteed rescue animals. 1.1600 0.03663 125 107 16 2
2054 Humanely raised, organically fed… PETA would approve. 1.1600 0.04197 100 86 12 2
2055 so you want pussy or doggy? 1.1600 0.04431 100 87 10 3
2056 Disgusting!! 1.1600 0.04431 100 87 10 3
2057 Mixed marriages help preserve the species. 1.1600 0.04431 100 87 10 3
2058 It's tops! 1.1600 0.03663 125 107 16 2
2059 Alley cats and pocket pooches? 1.1600 0.03685 100 84 16 0
2060 Be the next social media star get yourself a kitten and a puppy! The ladies will love you! Get em here first 1.1600 0.04197 100 86 12 2
2061 It's the new marsupial trench coat by Kangol! 1.1597 0.03771 119 102 15 2
2062 Hey buddy, wanna meme-maker? 1.1597 0.03955 119 103 13 3
2063 You'll get two for the price of one! 1.1597 0.03577 119 101 17 1
2064 It's my new merch...until Apple comes out with the iPet at least! 1.1597 0.03771 119 102 15 2
2065 When I said I wanted to buy Persians I didn’t mean the cats. 1.1597 0.03771 119 102 15 2
2066 it's easy: Bobby I,BobbyII,BobbyIII and Bobby Jr. 1.1597 0.03771 119 102 15 2
2067 Just got 'em off the back of a truck! 1.1597 0.03771 119 102 15 2
2068 Yeah, I guarantee these are genuine Pokeymans or whatever you said. 1.1593 0.04086 113 98 12 3
2069 Buy two and I throw in a Rolex watch. 1.1593 0.04456 113 100 8 5
2070 They’re not for sale. I just use this to sneak them onto the subway. 1.1593 0.04086 113 98 12 3
2071 One of these pets is not like the others. One of these pets just doesn't belong. Can you tell... 1.1593 0.04275 113 99 10 4
2072 We're in a drought. For $100 I can make it rain cats and dogs. 1.1593 0.03679 113 96 16 1
2073 I have Cowdogs, Silver Retrievers, French Shepherds, and that's just the dogs... 1.1593 0.04086 113 98 12 3
2074 No mutts, no rescues. All pedigreed—guaranteed. 1.1593 0.03888 113 97 14 2
2075 Now see right here you got yer average pussy cat, but I got Tom cats too! Now if yer a dog fella, I got a mutt, real good dog, ‘bout the best there is. You want two? Got his brother right here. If yer a dog & a cat person, two fer one! Can't beat it! 1.1591 0.03999 132 116 11 5
2076 Hey mister fancy pants , you want the Mona Lisa , go to a museum ! 1.1589 0.03791 107 91 15 1
2077 And as an added bonus, your $2,000.00 donation gets you a personal thank you from George Santos. 1.1589 0.04017 107 92 13 2
2078 …and the best part is they’re coatbroken! 1.1589 0.03791 107 91 15 1
2079 Trade you Canine and Feline for Moonshine 1.1589 0.04434 107 94 9 4
2080 Like new! 1.1589 0.04017 107 92 13 2
2081 You won’t find these on taxidermy.com 1.1589 0.04434 107 94 9 4
2082 the receipt can say laundry detergent, if you want to avoid the ‘i got another pet’ conversation 1.1589 0.03551 107 90 17 0
2083 My business strategy is killing Sarah McLachlan's. 1.1587 0.03636 126 108 16 2
2084 I’m told you’re a man of furry tastes 1.1587 0.03457 126 107 18 1
2085 Genuine rescues, never socialized. 1.1584 0.04158 101 87 12 2
2086 And they're absolutely free. Just a small $300 rehoming fee. 1.1584 0.04158 101 87 12 2
2087 It's your care-free pet. 1.1584 0.04158 101 87 12 2
2088 Dog-gone cat-astrophic, I think... 1.1584 0.03651 101 85 16 0
2089 …and these rarely kill their masters! 1.1584 0.04390 101 88 10 3
2090 Two boys and two girls and before long, you can set up a business just like me. 1.1584 0.04158 101 87 12 2
2091 psst. Buddy. You looking for adrenochrome? 1.1584 0.03913 101 86 14 1
2092 You ain’t gonna find these fine puppies anywhere else 1.1584 0.03913 101 86 14 1
2093 What do you mean, 'that's not a pocket pussy'? 1.1584 0.04390 101 88 10 3
2094 Cloud seeding startup. Wanna invest? 1.1584 0.04390 101 88 10 3
2095 Knock-offs? C'mon! These puppies are 100% genuine. 1.1583 0.03924 120 104 13 3
2096 Just don't mix them. 1.1583 0.03550 120 102 17 1
2097 You wouldn’t believe the high- stare into their little eyes and feel the world melt away. 1.1583 0.04099 120 105 11 4
2098 You can call me 'The Rainmaker'. 1.1579 0.03650 114 97 16 1
2099 You can join the neighborhood watchdog program! 1.1579 0.03650 114 97 16 1
2100 Hey, buddy, want a pure bred imitation street dog for thousands less than the real pure bred? 1.1579 0.03856 114 98 14 2
2101 Here, kitty kitty and two underdogs for you half price. 1.1579 0.03856 114 98 14 2
2102 Picked them up in the last rainsrorm 1.1579 0.04053 114 99 12 3
2103 ...and you never need to wind 'em up! 1.1579 0.03856 114 98 14 2
2104 They come with diapers. 1.1579 0.03856 114 98 14 2
2105 These kittens and puppies get along so much better than the cats and dogs. 1.1579 0.04053 114 99 12 3
2106 I've also got some seriously naughty ones in my truck, if you're interested. 1.1579 0.03856 114 98 14 2
2107 How about a RolRex? Or perhaps a cheap Catsio? 1.1575 0.03941 127 111 12 4
2108 I know $200 is a lot of money,but these critters are descendants of Rin-Tin-Tin,Lassie,Morris and Ted Nude-Gent. 1.1575 0.03779 127 110 14 3
2109 I breed them myself, on little farm upstate where people send their old cats and dogs. 1.1575 0.03610 127 109 16 2
2110 I call this little guy Rolex. 1.1575 0.03610 127 109 16 2
2111 I'll have what she's having 1.1575 0.03941 127 111 12 4
2112 Each one is named Bootleg 1.1574 0.03982 108 93 13 2
2113 Have I got a deal for you! 1.1574 0.03982 108 93 13 2
2114 This one's a French bulldog." 1.1574 0.03982 108 93 13 2
2115 You wanna know why there’s a drought? I got the cats and dogs… 1.1574 0.03982 108 93 13 2
2116 Every dog walker should have one. 1.1574 0.04194 108 94 11 3
2117 Money back guarantee, if you can find me. 1.1570 0.03713 121 104 15 2
2118 Can I interest you in a Cockle Spaniel? A Yorker Terrier? A Stench Poodle? 1.1569 0.04350 102 89 10 3
2119 Pandemic pets! Cheap! 1.1569 0.04120 102 88 12 2
2120 My landlord will not allow pets 1.1569 0.04567 102 90 8 4
2121 Try these slippers for 'street cred' 1.1569 0.04120 102 88 12 2
2122 Tired of muggings and wristwatches? 1.1569 0.04350 102 89 10 3
2123 Dr. Oppenheimer? Is that you? 1.1569 0.04120 102 88 12 2
2124 Cheaper than real pets but just as amusing 1.1565 0.04020 115 100 12 3
2125 Try an emotional support animal. 1.1565 0.04383 115 102 8 5
2126 But wait! Let me show you the other side' 1.1565 0.04205 115 101 10 4
2127 Genuine Cyanese? Pure-bred Spoodle? 1.1565 0.04020 115 100 12 3
2128 I've got fluffballs not 8balls! 1.1565 0.04020 115 100 12 3
2129 I've got some dopamine and oxytocin fresh off-the-shelter. 1.1562 0.03583 128 110 16 2
2130 Shhh...I whisked these away from the Asian restaurant just in time. 1.1562 0.04009 96 82 13 1
2131 … and they’ll also make you feel as if your existence in our society actually mattered! 1.1562 0.04274 96 83 11 2
2132 This coat is from Kennel Cole. 1.1560 0.03727 109 93 15 1
2133 You can get all four for one pound. 1.1560 0.04158 109 95 11 3
2134 Wanna try a dose of cute-caine? 1.1560 0.03948 109 94 13 2
2135 Pssst, the cats are moderate Republicans. 1.1560 0.04357 109 96 9 4
2136 There’s always the potential for inbreeding. 1.1560 0.04158 109 95 11 3
2137 These little fellas are already pocket-trained! 1.1560 0.04158 109 95 11 3
2138 Are you lookin’ for Pucci or Purrberry? 1.1560 0.04357 109 96 9 4
2139 No, not China ... back alley! 1.1557 0.03864 122 106 13 3
2140 Look at these faces-- I'll make you an offer you can't refuse. 1.1557 0.03496 122 104 17 1
2141 Special, today only; buy all four and I'll throw in the coat. 1.1556 0.04975 90 80 6 4
2142 You get up to four times the emotional support, and it’s a personal petting zoo. 1.1553 0.04083 103 89 12 2
2143 100% purebred. Honest! 1.1553 0.04525 103 91 8 4
2144 They make great over-the-door decor too. 1.1553 0.04083 103 89 12 2
2145 Foreign or domestic? 1.1552 0.03794 116 100 14 2
2146 I've got both your puppers and meowners 1.1552 0.03794 116 100 14 2
2147 Yeah. The jacket's free. 1.1552 0.03376 116 98 18 0
2148 Each one comes with a five year/five bark warranty, whichever comes first. 1.1552 0.03376 116 98 18 0
2149 « You will never get up later than 5:30 in the morning! » 1.1552 0.03794 116 100 14 2
2150 pet is only a three letter word 1.1550 0.03724 129 112 14 3
2151 It rained cats and dogs and I picked up a few. 1.1546 0.03971 97 83 13 1
2152 As seen on Instagram. 1.1546 0.04479 97 85 9 3
2153 They go everywhere with me. Such good company. 1.1546 0.04232 97 84 11 2
2154 Their movement is automatic. No need to wind them up. 1.1545 0.03915 110 95 13 2
2155 I hope these animals don't poop in my coat. 1.1545 0.04320 110 97 9 4
2156 And it used to be doggies in the windows. 1.1545 0.03915 110 95 13 2
2157 Cary one of these bad boys on your back bro, ain't nobody will touch you. 1.1545 0.04320 110 97 9 4
2158 These will be as hot as the beanie babies! 1.1545 0.04320 110 97 9 4
2159 And these four are housebroken 1.1545 0.03915 110 95 13 2
2160 this week's stuff is puuuure pup" 1.1545 0.04320 110 97 9 4
2161 C'mon, only one cat left... 1.1545 0.03835 123 107 13 3
2162 Whatever you want! I got’em both 1.1545 0.04005 123 108 11 4
2163 Hey man, you wanna get your hands on some good ol fashioned serotonin? 1.1545 0.03470 123 105 17 1
2164 Those "Pugs not Drugs" shirts are a slippery slope lemme tell you 1.1538 0.03563 117 100 16 1
2165 No Rolexes, Pal, just puppies and kitties. 1.1538 0.04137 117 103 10 4
2166 See Gary, I DO have 2 cats and 2 dogs in my coat. 1.1538 0.04046 104 90 12 2
2167 Of course I can get you a Doberman; this is just my sample case. 1.1538 0.03555 104 88 16 0
2168 I found them during yesterday's torrential rain. 1.1538 0.04271 104 91 10 3
2169 This raincoat is perfect for those times when it’s raining cats and dogs. 1.1538 0.03764 117 101 14 2
2170 Pick one quick kid, they're not housebroken. 1.1538 0.03563 117 100 16 1
2171 And if you’d like something really special… 1.1538 0.04046 104 90 12 2
2172 Free pet insurance with every purchase! 1.1538 0.03809 104 89 14 1
2173 And fencing is included! 1.1538 0.04046 104 90 12 2
2174 Please tell Jerald Lewis that my cat and I find this cartoon very upsetting. 1.1538 0.04046 104 90 12 2
2175 I have to be honest... they're very good replicas 1.1538 0.04399 91 79 10 2
2176 One of a kind, every one of 'em. 1.1538 0.03955 117 102 12 3
2177 Dad, not again. 1.1538 0.03955 117 102 12 3
2178 I’m just going to have to run this by my wife first. 1.1538 0.04271 104 91 10 3
2179 They’re Foodles and Fersians. No one will ever know they’re not authentic purebreds. 1.1538 0.04668 91 80 8 3
2180 Post hamster takeover, circa 2052. 1.1532 0.03629 124 107 15 2
2181 Yes sir, they are 100% pure conflict kittens! 1.1532 0.03806 124 108 13 3
2182 You're expecting me to say something gross or weird and drop a bunch of f-bombs, but that's all in your sick head, not mine. These animals are proof of God's love, and I adore them and want them close to me all the time. 1.1532 0.04470 111 99 7 5
2183 Take a look at these hot babies, pal! 1.1532 0.04087 111 97 11 3
2184 My offer is good for two pee pees and a make potty and then the price goes up. 1.1532 0.03665 111 95 15 1
2185 This one is coatbroken." 1.1532 0.04087 111 97 11 3
2186 ...and they come with a money-back guarantee! 1.1532 0.03665 111 95 15 1
2187 They’re AKC certified AND “rescues”! 1.1532 0.04087 111 97 11 3
2188 Alright, it’s $2 a puppy kiss and $1 to pet the cat. 1.1532 0.03882 111 96 13 2
2189 Watches are yesterday’s news. 1.1531 0.04192 98 85 11 2
2190 Just got them from the Hamptons 1.1525 0.03734 118 102 14 2
2191 They're Sesame Street seconds! 1.1525 0.03734 118 102 14 2
2192 Hey buddy, wanna buy a pet? The humane society is trying to reach a new demographic. 1.1524 0.04232 105 92 10 3
2193 I rescued them from falling off the back of a truck." 1.1524 0.03775 105 90 14 1
2194 No pony, but canI interest you in a kitten or puppy? 1.1524 0.03524 105 89 16 0
2195 When it rains cats and dogs, it rains cats and dogs. 1.1524 0.04010 105 91 12 2
2196 I am selling the last bit of pawsitivity left after Pandemic, miss not - stakes are high! 1.1524 0.03775 105 90 14 1
2197 And they're pocket-broken, too. 1.1524 0.03524 105 89 16 0
2198 You said you were looking for a little…I’m guessing I misunderstood 1.1524 0.03775 105 90 14 1
2199 These are the deluxe models - they won't pee on your carpet! 1.1524 0.04010 105 91 12 2
2200 Say roll over, not Rolex! 1.1524 0.04232 105 92 10 3
2201 They scratch like hell when I close my coat. 1.1522 0.04620 92 81 8 3
2202 With your scratch resistant face, I think this one is perfect for you. 1.1522 0.04070 92 79 12 1
2203 They pounced off the back of a truck. 1.1522 0.04070 92 79 12 1
2204 This one is Prada and this one is Chanel and... 1.1522 0.04070 92 79 12 1
2205 They weren't kidding about that rain. 1.1520 0.03602 125 108 15 2
2206 I won’t ask any questions if you won’t. 1.1520 0.03418 125 107 17 1
2207 Straight from the puppy mill, I got you your teacups, your frenchies, your maine coons! If I don't got it, I can get it, no extra charge 1.1520 0.03777 125 109 13 3
2208 Tell you what: with each kitten or puppy you buy I’ll throw in an untraceable watch and a set of hubcaps. Possibly traceable. 1.1518 0.03634 112 96 15 1
2209 Definitely, an expert if he caught my attention! 1.1518 0.04053 112 98 11 3
2210 You won’t find these at K-Mart! 1.1518 0.03634 112 96 15 1
2211 Completely potty trained, I guarantee it! 1.1518 0.03634 112 96 15 1
2212 You really should take me up on my offer. It’s not gonna rain again for weeks. 1.1518 0.04053 112 98 11 3
2213 And pocket doggies, too 1.1518 0.03849 112 97 13 2
2214 Only twenny-fi' dollas! Fuhgeddaboudit! Do these look countafit to you? 1.1515 0.04152 99 86 11 2
2215 …And, when it’s raining cats and dogs… 1.1515 0.04152 99 86 11 2
2216 $10 for the basic model, $20 housebroken. 1.1515 0.04152 99 86 11 2
2217 It’s designed to attract lonely women and emphatic men. 1.1515 0.03622 99 84 15 0
2218 Guaranteed to tell you when it is time to go outside. 1.1515 0.03896 99 85 13 1
2219 Get them while they're hot. 1.1515 0.03896 99 85 13 1
2220 I enjoy working remotely. 1.1515 0.03896 99 85 13 1
2221 got surveillance, protection, alarms and rat terminators here. 1.1515 0.03896 99 85 13 1
2222 Well, yes, technically anything *might* be laced with fentanyl" 1.1513 0.03893 119 104 12 3
2223 Slippers,eh? Just so happens retrievers are half off today. 1.1513 0.03893 119 104 12 3
2224 Hey man, wanna buy a watchdog or cat? 1.1509 0.03975 106 92 12 2
2225 Your kids will never know their dead dog was even missing. 1.1509 0.04195 106 93 10 3
2226 They keep me cozy. 1.1509 0.03742 106 91 14 1
2227 Hot dogs 1.1509 0.04195 106 93 10 3
2228 They’re totally legit! It rained them last week! 1.1509 0.03742 106 91 14 1
2229 Or would you like to go full analogue? 1.1509 0.03742 106 91 14 1
2230 The shelter had no room... so I got them for a great deal. 1.1509 0.03742 106 91 14 1
2231 And this is just one of the terrific design options at Lenny's Coat Lining Emporium! 1.1509 0.04195 106 93 10 3
2232 And you thought you were getting a flasher 1.1508 0.03749 126 110 13 3
2233 Purebred Goldens-the lot of ‘em. 1.1508 0.03393 126 108 17 1
2234 Yes, they are newly arrived from last night's storm. 1.1508 0.03749 126 110 13 3
2235 Cuteable for the kid? 1.1508 0.03915 126 111 11 4
2236 The Westminster Flasher. 1.1505 0.04310 93 81 10 2
2237 This is the dumbest cartoon I have ever seen! 1.1505 0.04310 93 81 10 2
2238 Genuine strays; none are from kitty or puppy farms. 1.1504 0.03817 113 98 13 2
2239 Naw, just want drugs, I have plenty of girls. 1.1504 0.04019 113 99 11 3
2240 And they're hypoallergenic, too! 1.1504 0.03817 113 98 13 2
2241 Purr-lodex! 1.1504 0.03604 113 97 15 1
2242 Surplus from sustainable local breeders! 1.1504 0.03817 113 98 13 2
2243 Believe me, these Doggo Swatches can take a licking. 1.1504 0.03378 113 96 17 0
2244 It’s a new Breed, called Smuggles. 1.1504 0.04019 113 99 11 3
2245 Fancy a fenced fur ball? 1.1504 0.03604 113 97 15 1
2246 All slightly used by an elderly woman in Peoria. 1.1504 0.04211 113 100 9 4
2247 They don't call me the Modern Noah for nothin'! 1.1504 0.04019 113 99 11 3
2248 Lookin’ for these? 1.1504 0.03604 113 97 15 1
2249 Wanna purrchase? 1.1504 0.04019 113 99 11 3
2250 Nobody will be able to tell them apart from the real thing. 1.1500 0.03860 100 86 13 1
2251 Take your pick. I have the puppydoodle, the kitty doodle, the siamidoodle, the sheppidoodle, and of course none of them shed. 1.1500 0.03860 100 86 13 1
2252 Goldendoodle? Hey, I'm not a magician. 1.1500 0.03676 120 104 14 2
2253 These come with muted voices, so no problem with the 'no pet' rule." 1.1500 0.04352 100 88 9 3
2254 I have all your pet P 1.1500 0.03862 120 105 12 3
2255 Yes, for real, it was raining cats and dogs!! 1.1500 0.03589 100 85 15 0
2256 Yes, it is a kid friendly puppet show, why do you ask? 1.1500 0.04352 100 88 9 3
2257 With a coat like this one, you can walk eight. 1.1500 0.04578 100 89 7 4
2258 None of that hard stuff. Just purr-scriptions. 1.1500 0.03860 100 86 13 1
2259 Can you believe this weather? Drizzling kittens and puppies. 1.1500 0.03481 120 103 16 1
2260 I promise you, real designer cutie, patootty pets - no fakes! 1.1500 0.04039 120 106 10 4
2261 Hey buddy, wanna buy a hot pocket watch dog? 1.1496 0.03885 127 112 11 4
2262 Unvaccinated. 1.1495 0.04158 107 94 10 3
2263 Right. The doves are gone. 1.1495 0.04158 107 94 10 3
2264 Fresh from yesterday’s downpour. 1.1495 0.04365 107 95 8 4
2265 The cats are feral. They're on sale. 1.1495 0.03710 107 92 14 1
2266 Just think how many followers you could get with one of these. 1.1495 0.03710 107 92 14 1
2267 They are jacket broken and house-broken. 1.1495 0.04158 107 94 10 3
2268 they are all great watch dogs! 1.1495 0.03710 107 92 14 1
2269 Fleece. No fleas. 1.1495 0.03710 107 92 14 1
2270 Listen buddy, trust me, you get one, and it's a real chick magnet. Works better than any gym! 1.1495 0.03940 107 93 12 2
2271 Psst…Hey, Canadian, wanna make it rain? Try these. 1.1495 0.03940 107 93 12 2
2272 It's got POCKETS! 1.1495 0.03710 107 92 14 1
2273 Let’s just say they fell off a truck 1.1491 0.03986 114 100 11 3
2274 Keeps them out of the rain! 1.1491 0.03786 114 99 13 2
2275 Your chance of a lifetime to own a companion - no recurring costs, no mess, and it will love you forever - made by the world's best AI company! 1.1491 0.03786 114 99 13 2
2276 You want pure? I’ll show you pure. 1.1491 0.03786 114 99 13 2
2277 Need a little pick-me-up? 1.1489 0.03990 94 81 12 1
2278 Hey Mack,wanna buy a watch-dog? 1.1489 0.04527 94 83 8 3
2279 Pick one. 1.1488 0.03648 121 105 14 2
2280 One of these will meet your expectations of a family with significantly less cost and much more satisfying affection! 1.1488 0.03454 121 104 16 1
2281 They’re all rescues from Chinatown 1.1488 0.03832 121 106 12 3
2282 If you like exotic, I can show you the serpent. 1.1488 0.03648 121 105 14 2
2283 Guaranteed real. None of that faux fur shit. 1.1485 0.04075 101 88 11 2
2284 And with all four I throw in a guinea pig. 1.1485 0.04075 101 88 11 2
2285 They already know how to sit. 1.1485 0.04535 101 90 7 4
2286 Your kids will never know it's not Rover. 1.1485 0.04075 101 88 11 2
2287 Pedigree is guaranteed but if you buy all four you can have them for 75% off. 1.1485 0.03824 101 87 13 1
2288 Wadda ya mean are they guaranteed? Don't be fooled by their smiles. Of course they are. They fight like cats and dogs. 1.1485 0.04075 101 88 11 2
2289 Fresh batch from yesterday’s downpour! 1.1485 0.03824 101 87 13 1
2290 It's the cutest coat I've ever had. 1.1485 0.04075 101 88 11 2
2291 Vaccinated and potty-trained! Want one? 1.1484 0.03523 128 111 15 2
2292 Technically these are cots and dags, but just as cute! 1.1484 0.03344 128 110 17 1
2293 I have a dog in gold and sliver, and I have a cat in gold and silver. What'll it be? 1.1481 0.03678 108 93 14 1
2294 Never buy your cat on craigslist 1.1481 0.04121 108 95 10 3
2295 And you’re sure you’re not from the Humane Society? 1.1481 0.04121 108 95 10 3
2296 For you only ,lifetime guarantee. 1.1481 0.04121 108 95 10 3
2297 Just pick your favorite stray of the day! 1.1481 0.03434 108 92 16 0
2298 Today. Two for one. 1.1481 0.04326 108 96 8 4
2299 'No waiting lists or home checks you can, take it home immediately' 1.1481 0.04326 108 96 8 4
2300 Can I interest you in my two-for-fun special? 1.1478 0.03755 115 100 13 2
2301 I guarantee you, they're all French. 1.1478 0.04322 115 103 7 5
2302 This baby’s genuine Persian! 1.1478 0.03755 115 100 13 2
2303 Horse? Whadda'yez crazy, I got puppies and kittens 1.1478 0.03546 115 99 15 1
2304 After being released from Riker’s, my PO said I needed a job. So I followed my dream and opened a pet store! 1.1478 0.03324 115 98 17 0
2305 Emotional Support Pocket Pets 1.1477 0.04133 88 76 11 1
2306 This here is my family starter kit. You give them a little food and water and BAM!..you need a bigger place. 1.1477 0.04133 88 76 11 1
2307 One free umbrella with each adoption. 1.1475 0.03620 122 106 14 2
2308 Four companions, as promised. 1.1474 0.04225 95 83 10 2
2309 It's a designer trench coat so I can carry my fur babies everywhere. 1.1474 0.04482 95 84 8 3
2310 Oh my God...this guy just said it's been raining cats and dogs! 1.1474 0.04225 95 83 10 2
2311 Don't worry. If you're not interested, I have a "no kill" policy. 1.1474 0.04482 95 84 8 3
2312 I am running low on meowjuana so I threw in some woofies. 1.1474 0.04482 95 84 8 3
2313 And...The inside right of this coat has pockets for food. 1.1474 0.03656 95 81 14 0
2314 Any one of these emotional support animals will have you out of those sweats and sandals in a jiffy, and for the lowest price in the city… 1.1474 0.04225 95 83 10 2
2315 Just like I promised, a companion for the night who prefers cuddling. 1.1474 0.03951 95 82 12 1
2316 At this price, the furniture damage cost covers itself. 1.1474 0.04225 95 83 10 2
2317 I know, my scars are just healing but they seem happy 1.1474 0.03951 95 82 12 1
2318 Psst, you lookin' for a pocket pet? 1.1471 0.04271 102 90 9 3
2319 Puppies, kitties, made in America. Ten dollars. You can't lose. 1.1471 0.04038 102 89 11 2
2320 No it’s Peter…without the “a” 1.1471 0.03790 102 88 13 1
2321 This trenchcoat comes down to your knee and has FOUR pockets! Never again will you have to wear pants. 1.1471 0.03790 102 88 13 1
2322 What were you expecting? 1.1471 0.04038 102 89 11 2
2323 For two dollars more, I’ll throw in the pedigree papers. 1.1471 0.03790 102 88 13 1
2324 Rufus here will have YOU in HIS pocket in no time at all. 1.1471 0.03524 102 87 15 0
2325 Hot Pockets. Pack one for your next adventure. 1.1471 0.04038 102 89 11 2
2326 Three-dimensional ones cost more. 1.1468 0.03646 109 94 14 1
2327 So cheap, they're almost free! 1.1468 0.04086 109 96 10 3
2328 Yes, we’re back in the office full-time now. Thank goodness for the new post-pandemic dress code, though. 1.1468 0.03646 109 94 14 1
2329 That's the beauty of it, these are the kind that don't poop! 1.1468 0.03646 109 94 14 1
2330 I swear, man, all I did was ask if she'd like to see my pussy or my hot dog. 1.1468 0.03646 109 94 14 1
2331 You look like a telecommuter of discretion—ever been called on in a meeting and need to quickly draw attention away from what you’re saying? 1.1468 0.03405 109 93 16 0
2332 I guess this means my pet sitter is watching my watches. 1.1468 0.03646 109 94 14 1
2333 Kitty litter for you! 1.1466 0.03921 116 102 11 3
2334 Just wait til you see the baby snakes I keep in my pants. 1.1466 0.03725 116 101 13 2
2335 These are all certified "companion animals". 1.1466 0.03921 116 102 11 3
2336 And they're all garment-broken. 1.1463 0.03592 123 107 14 2
2337 Need a little companionship tonight? 1.1461 0.04673 89 79 7 3
2338 To keep them smiling, give me your wallet. 1.1461 0.04391 89 78 9 2
2339 pussy? 1.1461 0.04391 89 78 9 2
2340 What do you say? Looking to buy some serotonin? I’ve got the best price in the market 1.1461 0.04391 89 78 9 2
2341 I’m a cat person and a dog person, but mostly I’m a flasher. 1.1458 0.04437 96 85 8 3
2342 My personal guarantee. You won't find a cheaper doodle mix anywhere. 1.1458 0.03912 96 83 12 1
2343 Naw man, they're not licenesed... 1.1458 0.04183 96 84 10 2
2344 I can only ask you to pay for the puppies. Alex Folk, Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio. 1.1458 0.03912 96 83 12 1
2345 I swear they are not knock-offs. 1.1458 0.03912 96 83 12 1
2346 They are pro-life and not fixed. 1.1458 0.04437 96 85 8 3
2347 The high starts when they’re asleep. 1.1458 0.04183 96 84 10 2
2348 Plus you get any seat on the train. 1.1456 0.04451 103 92 7 4
2349 Four-for-one special 1.1456 0.03755 103 89 13 1
2350 Sorry the Rolex doesn't run. These I guarantee will! 1.1456 0.04001 103 90 11 2
2351 The cookbook comes extra 1.1456 0.04232 103 91 9 3
2352 I’ll make you a deal. 1.1456 0.04232 103 91 9 3
2353 I've got an of-fur you can't refuse!" 1.1455 0.03839 110 96 12 2
2354 They look even better on Tik-Tok 1.1455 0.03839 110 96 12 2
2355 They’re uncut, for now. 1.1455 0.03615 110 95 14 1
2356 Havent you heard? Adopt don't shop! 1.1455 0.04051 110 97 10 3
2357 It's like a Fitbit. 1.1455 0.03839 110 96 12 2
2358 Everything on this side is guaranteed to leave your house smelling.” 1.1455 0.03839 110 96 12 2
2359 Instant happiness and love! Guaranteed NOT purebreds! And look at them -- they're so little and helpless and need to be taken care of! And they don't eat much! And they've got all of their shots! 1.1455 0.03839 110 96 12 2
2360 Perhaps a French Bulldog puppy? 1.1455 0.03377 110 94 16 0
2361 these however are fur real. 1.1455 0.04051 110 97 10 3
2362 This one has a timer and an alarm. 1.1453 0.03490 117 101 15 1
2363 I picked these up last time it rained. 1.1453 0.03695 117 102 13 2
2364 They all have pedigrees, pedicures and appeared on TikToc. 1.1453 0.03695 117 102 13 2
2365 Which one do you want to hear a 20-minute-long story about? 1.1453 0.03272 117 100 17 0
2366 Sure, you can buy a watch. But how about something that lasts longer? 1.1444 0.04345 90 79 9 2
2367 These are fresh, just collected from last night's rain storm. 1.1444 0.03726 90 77 13 0
2368 If you're interested, I also have some Class A pugs 1.1443 0.04394 97 86 8 3
2369 Take one of these babies off my hands and I guarantee it will change your life. 1.1443 0.04142 97 85 10 2
2370 I’ve got your dopamine hit right here, kid. 1.1443 0.04142 97 85 10 2
2371 Special price! Buy 'em by the bag! 1.1443 0.03875 97 84 12 1
2372 Guaranteed housebroken! 1.1443 0.04142 97 85 10 2
2373 They're indescribably delicious. 1.1443 0.03875 97 84 12 1
2374 A scene from, "Of Mice and Men II: Lenny's Revenge". 1.1443 0.04142 97 85 10 2
2375 Hey, I get it all the time... Those scammers give us legit alleyway kitten and puppy salesmen a bad name. 1.1442 0.03722 104 90 13 1
2376 Kitten aside, this a real barken! 1.1442 0.03722 104 90 13 1
2377 Or if dopamine is your drug of choice, I also have these fresh puppies and kittens! 1.1442 0.03462 104 89 15 0
2378 I 've always felt 'Cat Burglar' to be pejorative so I've opted to diversify. 1.1442 0.03965 104 91 11 2
2379 I was a weatherman. But now its rain coating cats and dogs. 1.1442 0.04193 104 92 9 3
2380 Did you see Taxi Driver? 1.1442 0.04193 104 92 9 3
2381 You'll blend! 1.1442 0.04410 104 93 7 4
2382 oijiuhiunef 1.1442 0.03722 104 90 13 1
2383 This isn't what I meant by "hot dog". 1.1442 0.04410 104 93 7 4
2384 Noisy? You're barking up the wrong tree. 1.1442 0.03722 104 90 13 1
2385 Can I interest you in an interracial pair of pets? 1.1442 0.03722 104 90 13 1
2386 Don't worry, I tested for petanyl 1.1441 0.03585 111 96 14 1
2387 guaranteed to you 1.1441 0.03807 111 97 12 2
2388 Hi Roy, I will be back at 5 with the dirty pictures you like! 1.1441 0.03585 111 96 14 1
2389 do I look excited? 1.1441 0.03585 111 96 14 1
2390 This is the jacket I wear when im worried it’s gonna rain cats and dogs. 1.1441 0.03585 111 96 14 1
2391 My associates will be taking your wallet, your phone, and any loose treats. 1.1441 0.03462 118 102 15 1
2392 ...and they've all been neutered! 1.1441 0.03858 118 104 11 3
2393 They keep perfect time 1.1441 0.03858 118 104 11 3
2394 And if you buy in the next five minutes, it comes with a free first name. 1.1441 0.03246 118 101 17 0
2395 Nothing for sale today. Just taking the kids toy shopping. 1.1440 0.03539 125 109 14 2
2396 We got Afghan, Siamese, Yorkshire terrier, American shorthair… 1.1440 0.03351 125 108 16 1
2397 They’re not caterfeit; this is a pup-up. 1.1439 0.03588 132 116 13 3
2398 And they prefer to work from kennel, too. 1.1429 0.03982 112 99 10 3
2399 I call it the cruelty-free, fur-lined jacket. 1.1429 0.03555 112 97 14 1
2400 50% cheaper than the ones you get from the animal shelter! 1.1429 0.03689 105 91 13 1
2401 Psst! If you get a kitten, well, then you get a baby cat! 1.1429 0.03555 112 97 14 1
2402 Of course they're potty trained! 1.1429 0.04009 119 106 9 4
2403 This ain't no PET scam. 1.1429 0.03689 126 111 12 3
2404 I have upgraded from Rolex watches. 1.1429 0.03775 112 98 12 2
2405 Go go Gadget cuteness...this was Penny's idea (obviously) 1.1429 0.04351 98 87 8 3
2406 There’s a knife shortage, so I saw an opportunity. 1.1429 0.03929 105 92 11 2
2407 Yeah I know kid, dating just isn't what it used to be. These little critters, they'll great you right back in the game. Buy 1 get one half off- diversify your risk. 1.1429 0.04006 91 79 11 1
2408 I’m guessing you’re Gen Z and online too much. 1.1429 0.03689 126 111 12 3
2409 For an extra 20 bucks they'll do it doggy style. 1.1429 0.03775 112 98 12 2
2410 Pet for your thought? 1.1429 0.03512 126 110 14 2
2411 ...and if your building has a "No pets" policy, I can throw in this coat for ten bucks." or But these are Designer Pets! I got a Donna Karan, Marc Jacobs, Stella McCartney, Vera Wang.. 1.1429 0.03857 126 112 10 4
2412 I’m outta Ambien but these’ll do the trick” 1.1429 0.03555 112 97 14 1
2413 Now if these don’t interest you, let me show you my cock. 1.1429 0.04300 91 80 9 2
2414 Believe me, they are ready to burst the casino! 1.1429 0.04351 98 87 8 3
2415 Komodo? No, too "last administration". This year it's all sweetness and light. 1.1429 0.03775 112 98 12 2
2416 They come with a free Rolex. 1.1429 0.03512 126 110 14 2
2417 Rainy season is when I make most of my profits. 1.1429 0.03637 119 104 13 2
2418 It rained last night. 1.1429 0.03775 112 98 12 2
2419 Feelthy pets - guaranteed not house trained. 1.1429 0.04370 105 94 7 4
2420 If you insist on a high end name, how about little Omega here, or her brother, Rolex? 1.1429 0.03637 119 104 13 2
2421 Like the late,great Carl Jung said,dreams are small hidden doors in the deepest and most intimate sanctum of the soul. 1.1429 0.04009 119 106 9 4
2422 Not only is it waterproof, we save a ton on airfare. 1.1429 0.04006 91 79 11 1
2423 Free range puppies and kittens. No government regulations, no vet bills. 1.1429 0.03775 112 98 12 2
2424 Missing your mother? No. 1.1429 0.04833 84 75 6 3
2425 Hot dogs, get your hot dogs! 1.1429 0.03689 105 91 13 1
2426 What do you want? I have Purr-berry, Cute-ci, Paw-da, and this little guy is Louis Meow-tton. 1.1429 0.03555 112 97 14 1
2427 you gonna love this stuff, better and stronger than drugs! 1.1429 0.04156 105 93 9 3
2428 ..I got the good stuff, hypoallergenic. 1.1417 0.03608 120 105 13 2
2429 Who needs a watch? 1.1416 0.03294 113 97 16 0
2430 No questions asked and you get the pick of the litters 1.1416 0.03949 113 100 10 3
2431 Yeah, they’re replicas. But these typically last longer than the designer brands! 1.1415 0.03401 106 91 15 0
2432 Like to buy a counterfeit pet for your kid? 1.1415 0.03894 106 93 11 2
2433 My first name's Pete; but with a last of Peeve, you can easily see it was all just a matter of dropping one letter and everyone can come to me for their lost pets. 1.1415 0.03894 106 93 11 2
2434 Ain't they cute? Petable Pets need a home! Help the homeless - all of us- with your donation. 1.1415 0.04118 106 94 9 3
2435 ...But...But what about the others? 1.1415 0.03894 106 93 11 2
2436 And this one will give you instant feelings of love and connection,without any lingering obligation or regret. 1.1415 0.04118 106 94 9 3
2437 If we get caught, is this a feliney or just a pet-ty crime? 1.1415 0.03656 106 92 13 1
2438 Yeah, I got legit endorphin supplements. Just not FDA approved, yet. 1.1415 0.03894 106 93 11 2
2439 So cute, it's illegal! 1.1415 0.03894 106 93 11 2
2440 Guaranteed instant happiness, man! You will be coming back for more. 1.1415 0.04118 106 94 9 3
2441 I’ve got more in my other pocket side. 1.1414 0.03801 99 86 12 1
2442 If these aren't ya style, I got snakes and spiders on the other side. 1.1414 0.03801 99 86 12 1
2443 Trust me, you’ll attract more girls with any one of these cuties! 1.1414 0.04543 99 89 6 4
2444 Lookin' for love? 1.1414 0.04064 99 87 10 2
2445 Sure it's only a picture, but think of your savings vs. buying four live cats. 1.1414 0.04064 99 87 10 2
2446 Trust me. Only a forensic veterinarian can tell the difference. 1.1414 0.04064 99 87 10 2
2447 Half price. None of them have balls but they’re cute. 1.1413 0.03965 92 80 11 1
2448 These were all Payboy Pets. 1.1413 0.04528 92 82 7 3
2449 100% gluten free. Only $10 each or 2 for $15. 1.1413 0.03965 92 80 11 1
2450 …and all are pre-pandemic. 1.1413 0.04256 92 81 9 2
2451 On this side we got ourselves the gen-u-ine article, Cat Stevens. Then, classic Airdale Jordans, an award winning Claire Dane, and an original member of the Paw Patrol. Special price for you. 1.1413 0.04528 92 82 7 3
2452 Yep! They're genuine Cheshires! 1.1412 0.04152 85 74 10 1
2453 See, I told you this was an ethical fur coat. 1.1405 0.03580 121 106 13 2
2454 Buy one genuine watchdog get a scratch off free. 1.1405 0.03768 121 107 11 3
2455 Potty-coat trained! 1.1404 0.03712 114 100 12 2
2456 It’s one for $10 or two for $15! 1.1404 0.03712 114 100 12 2
2457 Don’t see anything you like? I have a cow in my other coat if you’d prefer. 1.1404 0.03916 114 101 10 3
2458 Hey Buddy! Want a designer dog? 1.1404 0.03497 114 99 14 1
2459 This one here wrote the tune Stray cat Strut. 1.1404 0.03268 114 98 16 0
2460 Pssst, buddy ...these work better than drugs! Yes,you still have to pay in cash. 1.1402 0.03372 107 92 15 0
2461 Al under 4 months 1.1402 0.04082 107 95 9 3
2462 You’re under arrest for attempting to shop not adopt! 1.1402 0.03860 107 94 11 2
2463 Whatever you want I got it. Pure bred? Feral? I’m your man. 1.1402 0.03624 107 93 13 1
2464 Cop, don’t shop 1.1402 0.03372 107 92 15 0
2465 Of course this is totally legit! There are 3 reality TV cameras recording you right now. 1.1400 0.04269 100 89 8 3
2466 I’m guessing you’re a guy with deep pockets; you will absolutely love these critters. 1.1400 0.04269 100 89 8 3
2467 You know how hard it is finding watches on the street now? 1.1400 0.04025 100 88 10 2
2468 Any of these will increase your view count. Kittens are trending. 1.1400 0.04025 100 88 10 2
2469 They’re the latest models, just in from last night’s thunderstorm. 1.1400 0.04269 100 89 8 3
2470 Cats and dogs, living together! 1.1400 0.04269 100 89 8 3
2471 These here are some of the most addictive ones on the market. I recommend getting two.. 1.1400 0.04025 100 88 10 2
2472 You can see for yourself they come from a good home. 1.1400 0.04025 100 88 10 2
2473 We’re talkin’ real, authentic 24 carat golden retrievers. 1.1400 0.03766 100 87 12 1
2474 One warning for you buddy. The dogs names are Stay and Sit. 1.1398 0.04213 93 82 9 2
2475 The first boop's free. 1.1398 0.04481 93 83 7 3
2476 Hot dogs and cool cats! BOGO today only! 1.1398 0.03925 93 81 11 1
2477 Sorry, the snakes and iguanas are in my other jacket. 1.1398 0.03925 93 81 11 1
2478 I've got the Purrfect companion for you. Only $10 more, and I'll give you any breed paperwork you want. 1.1398 0.04213 93 82 9 2
2479 they are under cover 1.1395 0.04106 86 75 10 1
2480 Guaranteed for a million likes 1.1395 0.04427 86 76 8 2
2481 Papers? Sure, why they got papers! 1.1391 0.03682 115 101 12 2
2482 Buy two get two free... 1.1391 0.04075 115 103 8 4
2483 Are those pets in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? 1.1389 0.03593 108 94 13 1
2484 These are not hot dogs and cats! 1.1389 0.04046 108 96 9 3
2485 It’s a no-kill trench coat. It 1.1389 0.04046 108 96 9 3
2486 Have I got a deal for you? Quiet and housebroken 1.1389 0.03593 108 94 13 1
2487 This works for us until they're leash trained. 1.1389 0.03826 108 95 11 2
2488 With the hot dogs, you get mustard and relish. 1.1389 0.03826 108 95 11 2
2489 They don’t need toilet training.” 1.1389 0.03593 108 94 13 1
2490 His life forever changed after he snorted a feline from the cocanine dealer 1.1389 0.03826 108 95 11 2
2491 Psstt. Do you want some hush puppies? 1.1389 0.03826 108 95 11 2
2492 And I have a snake in my pants. 1.1386 0.03988 101 89 10 2
2493 All show stoppers. And I can let you have this little cat for $20. She’s a real handful.” 1.1386 0.03455 101 87 14 0
2494 Wanna pure breed? Originals. Guaranteed. 1.1386 0.04229 101 90 8 3
2495 They're the perfect companions - and they don't talk back, like kids. 1.1386 0.03731 101 88 12 1
2496 You don't need a watch; these little fellas tell time. 1.1386 0.03988 101 89 10 2
2497 They're so quiet you can keep them in a coat pocket! 1.1386 0.03731 101 88 12 1
2498 They don't claw, they don't pee, but thy cuddle real good. Perfect, right? 1.1386 0.04229 101 90 8 3
2499 I can forecast the weather for you 1.1386 0.03988 101 89 10 2
2500 Rolled up newspaper or spray bottle? 1.1386 0.03731 101 88 12 1
2501 Of course it won't pee on ya cah-pet! Trust me! 1.1386 0.03731 101 88 12 1
2502 Yessir, these are 100% authentic Swiss rescue pups and kittens. 1.1386 0.04229 101 90 8 3
2503 No I don’t have ‘Khat’ I have CAT! 1.1386 0.03731 101 88 12 1
2504 'Choose quick pal, if I get busted they sentence ya in dog years' 1.1386 0.03731 101 88 12 1
2505 Who said dogs and cats can't get along? 1.1386 0.03731 101 88 12 1
2506 For an extra hundred, I can get you Sarah McLachlan-grade. 1.1386 0.03988 101 89 10 2
2507 Sssshhh I fence for Bob Barker only the best quality for you The price is right 1.1383 0.03580 94 81 13 0
2508 Pets or meat. It's up to you. 1.1383 0.03886 94 82 11 1
2509 Any selected pet also includes a free Rolex watch. 1.1383 0.03580 94 81 13 0
2510 Snakes? Sure, I got some snakes, too. 1.1383 0.04170 94 83 9 2
2511 Just grab'em by the pussy! 1.1383 0.03886 94 82 11 1
2512 There are also dogs in my coat. I hear some people say I only have cats but I also have dogs in my coat. 1.1383 0.03886 94 82 11 1
2513 Take one, I'll give you a good dig-scount. 1.1383 0.03886 94 82 11 1
2514 With this, you’re guaranteed some rain. 1.1383 0.04170 94 83 9 2
2515 Sir , you resemble James Bond . This one here is Pussy Galore . 1.1382 0.03710 123 109 11 3
2516 Got just the thing to juice your Instagram account 1.1379 0.03441 116 101 14 1
2517 Fresh out the oven! 1.1379 0.03852 116 103 10 3
2518 Just sold my last wristwatch, but I’ve got this watchdog. Father was best in show at Westminster a couple years ago. 1.1379 0.03441 116 101 14 1
2519 These are genuine alley cats and feral dogs. Imagine the admiration of your puppy-mill hating friends. 1.1379 0.04674 87 78 6 3
2520 Nothing to your liking? Can I interest you in the EXOTIC pets in the right pockets? 1.1379 0.03852 116 103 10 3
2521 Sorta gives you paws, no? 1.1379 0.04062 87 76 10 1
2522 Which pocket do you pick? 1.1377 0.03284 138 121 15 2
2523 Hey, not just dogs and cats. We got birds and snakes. You name it, we got it. 1.1376 0.04011 109 97 9 3
2524 I can always spot a responsible person whose crushing desire to care and nuture is inherently woven within the fabric of their DNA. 1.1376 0.03793 109 96 11 2
2525 Pocket pets you can take anywhere. 1.1376 0.03315 109 94 15 0
2526 Let's just say they fell off a Tonka truck." 1.1376 0.04011 109 97 9 3
2527 This one here has hind legs! 1.1376 0.04011 109 97 9 3
2528 Sure! I got watchya need - she’ll never know the difference! 1.1376 0.03793 109 96 11 2
2529 While waiting for the Humane Society agent to arrive, Sean concentrated on hiding his rage. 1.1376 0.03793 109 96 11 2
2530 Psst...here's how money really can buy you happiness 1.1376 0.03793 109 96 11 2
2531 You like fishies? I can get ya fishies but I need my raincoat. 1.1376 0.03315 109 94 15 0
2532 Wanna buy a watchdog . . . or are you more of a cat person? 1.1376 0.03562 109 95 13 1
2533 So what’ll it be? A little pup or would you rather get little pussy? Can’t go wrong with either. Nope. 1.1376 0.03793 109 96 11 2
2534 They’re all completely pocket trained. 1.1373 0.03424 102 88 14 0
2535 You can have your pick of the litter. 1.1373 0.03424 102 88 14 0
2536 No one will be able to tell it's not real Golden Retriever. 1.1373 0.03951 102 90 10 2
2537 I got the top breed the girls go wild for… yeah, the French Balldog. 1.1373 0.03697 102 89 12 1
2538 Scoot if you are an animal right’s activist 1.1373 0.03951 102 90 10 2
2539 Pssst....wanna buy a bitch? 1.1373 0.04189 102 91 8 3
2540 We accept Venmo, PayPal or bitcoin only 1.1373 0.04189 102 91 8 3
2541 The year is 2040, Joe really wants a pedigree Boston Terrior. 1.1373 0.04189 102 91 8 3
2542 No, no. I said do you wanna WATCH my PETS… 1.1373 0.03951 102 90 10 2
2543 My supplier was out of kitchenware but the Humane Society came through like a champ! 1.1368 0.04391 95 85 7 3
2544 ON your right from top to bottom left and right wing republican candidates. An on the your left from top to bottom left and right wing democratic candidates! 1.1368 0.04391 95 85 7 3
2545 Friend me on Facebook or these adorable pets disappear. 1.1368 0.04129 95 84 9 2
2546 You can have one for 10 dollars or two for 15. 1.1368 0.04129 95 84 9 2
2547 Oxycodone? No, but I got enough oxytocin to calm a small horse. 1.1368 0.04129 95 84 9 2
2548 If you aren't happy with it in six months, return it and I'll give you your money back." 1.1368 0.04391 95 85 7 3
2549 Hey bud, I will give you a great price on these purebred cuties. I found them myself! 1.1368 0.04129 95 84 9 2
2550 Here’s the latest anxiety medicine. Baby animals. No scrolling required. 1.1368 0.04129 95 84 9 2
2551 100% pureblood my friend. no shit. 1.1368 0.03545 95 82 13 0
2552 Absolutely guaranteed one-of-a-kind designer pets! 1.1368 0.03413 117 102 14 1
2553 And each one comes with a "Therapy Animal" certificate so you can bring them into restaurants! 1.1368 0.04009 117 105 8 4
2554 Whad' a' ya' buyin'? 100% genuine. 1.1368 0.03413 117 102 14 1
2555 Yeah, but can you believe I have even more college degrees? 1.1368 0.03413 117 102 14 1
2556 I got a friend at the AKC..." 1.1364 0.04331 88 78 8 2
2557 Hey, relax, at least I rescued them from the Chinese restaurant down the street! 1.1364 0.03760 110 97 11 2
2558 You, my friend, strike me as a cat-slash-dog kind of person!" 1.1364 0.03532 110 96 13 1
2559 ...And perfect for when it rains cats and dogs. 1.1364 0.03976 110 98 9 3
2560 Some of these roll over, sit, stay, and fetch top dollar. 1.1364 0.03287 110 95 15 0
2561 They’re a south of the border special. They’ve learned to swim. 1.1364 0.03760 110 97 11 2
2562 “I promise you, they tell the time too” 1.1364 0.03976 110 98 9 3
2563 What's the confusion? This is Molly, that's Mary Jane-- Ah, I hear it now. 1.1364 0.03532 110 96 13 1
2564 You have to treat me right because whatever happens to me, happens to them. 1.1364 0.03287 110 95 15 0
2565 Check out my new, 100% ethical fur-lined jacket. 1.1364 0.03760 110 97 11 2
2566 Any one of these cute pets will make you sleep better. 1.1359 0.03914 103 91 10 2
2567 Purloined?..I’m not sure..but they are so awfully cute.. 1.1359 0.04374 103 93 6 4
2568 The coat gets nicely warm in the fall. 1.1359 0.03663 103 90 12 1
2569 Not a rat in this litter. 1.1359 0.03663 103 90 12 1
2570 I’ve also got a snake down my trousers and mouse under my hat. 1.1359 0.03914 103 91 10 2
2571 They are all genuine Steiff. 1.1359 0.04150 103 92 8 3
2572 No, it's not exactly legal but look how cute. 1.1359 0.03663 103 90 12 1
2573 I’m tellin’ ya’ buddy, they’re real and they’re fantastic. 1.1359 0.03914 103 91 10 2
2574 This ain't no pyramid scheme, Buddy. 1.1354 0.04088 96 85 9 2
2575 Each one comes with its own pedigree.” 1.1354 0.03810 96 84 11 1
2576 Two of these watches have nine lives each, and the other two keep on ticking and licking. 1.1354 0.04348 96 86 7 3
2577 This is my kindler, gentler pickpocket approach. 1.1354 0.03810 96 84 11 1
2578 Which one do you like? Each has a loving AI voice that talks to you and makes you fall in love with her. 1.1354 0.03511 96 83 13 0
2579 A special deal for you 'cause you rushed out in your slippers - take two! 1.1354 0.04348 96 86 7 3
2580 I have their hind ends under the right arm. You can mix and match. 1.1354 0.03810 96 84 11 1
2581 Whatta ya say? No catches. The whole kit en da poodle. Five barks. Or is that too meowny for mew? 1.1354 0.03511 96 83 13 0
2582 I know - it's hard to believe - but they are all from the same litter! You look like a smart man who knows the value of keeping a family together! 1.1354 0.03810 96 84 11 1
2583 A special purchase makes these half the price of the ritzy pet shops on Park Avenue. 1.1351 0.03942 111 99 9 3
2584 These bad boys are all totally pure. 1.1351 0.03502 111 97 13 1
2585 All ethically bred. Guaranteed. 1.1351 0.03728 111 98 11 2
2586 If you want a knock-off go around the corner but these here are the purest breds you'll ever lay your hands on ... 1.1351 0.03502 111 97 13 1
2587 Hey buddy, you wanna buy a cute puppy or kitten? Welcome to gentrified Times Square 1.1351 0.03728 111 98 11 2
2588 Don’t adopt don’t shop just smuggle. 1.1351 0.03942 111 99 9 3
2589 Check out my petticoat! 1.1348 0.04285 89 79 8 2
2590 We are not slaves nor for sales" 1.1348 0.04285 89 79 8 2
2591 Low overhead - you get the savings! 1.1346 0.04112 104 93 8 3
2592 Trust me, this is WAY more humane than a standard pet store!” 1.1346 0.03879 104 92 10 2
2593 And the Snuggle Coat comes with a free set of pets. 1.1346 0.03879 104 92 10 2
2594 Well, no, I don't have any Designer Watches today, but could I interest you in a great Designer Watch Dog? 1.1346 0.03630 104 91 12 1
2595 There's a sale at the Cat Distribution System this week. 1.1346 0.04112 104 93 8 3
2596 I also carry bunnies and birds in my other coat. 1.1346 0.04112 104 93 8 3
2597 I’ve got a frenchie with droopy ears for $100 1.1346 0.03630 104 91 12 1
2598 The cats? 100% Persian, Blue Point, weaned and house trained. The dogs? 25% Pekapoo, and 50% Morkie 25%Sschnugglypoo. All 100% weaned!!! And 50% house trained!! Luckily we’re out of the house !! …Oh wait… 1.1345 0.03360 119 104 14 1
2599 This coat is great for downpours. 1.1340 0.04048 97 86 9 2
2600 You can use them as Tik-Tok memes. 1.1340 0.04048 97 86 9 2
2601 Addictive? Yes, but you'll love it! 1.1340 0.04305 97 87 7 3
2602 It's not just Kitty Porn, you know... 1.1340 0.04305 97 87 7 3
2603 It's the 'purr'fect coat for reconnaissance 1.1340 0.04048 97 86 9 2
2604 These will really make you feel happy for a long time. 1.1340 0.04048 97 86 9 2
2605 I’m trying to diversify my business. 1.1340 0.04048 97 86 9 2
2606 So you don’t need a watch? What about a new pet? 1.1340 0.03477 97 84 13 0
2607 I hear you're looking for fur babies? 1.1340 0.03773 97 85 11 1
2608 There four to eight more where that came from 1.1340 0.04048 97 86 9 2
2609 You think this is strange, you should see the other side! 1.1340 0.03477 97 84 13 0
2610 Feed 'em enough and they'll make great bookends. 1.1339 0.03908 112 100 9 3
2611 Care for a pooch or a pussy from my pouch? 1.1339 0.03473 112 98 13 1
2612 You want a toy? Have I got a deal for you. 1.1339 0.03473 112 98 13 1
2613 Wanna lick? 1.1339 0.03421 127 112 13 2
2614 This will make you feel better... 1.1333 0.03935 90 79 10 1
2615 Yes, I did run out of Barbies. 1.1333 0.03935 90 79 10 1
2616 Buy two dogs, get a cat free. 1.1333 0.03935 90 79 10 1
2617 Of course they're real. Only genuine catx and dogx here. 1.1333 0.04240 90 80 8 2
2618 Hundreds of cuddles and thousands of Tik-Tok hits guaranteed, or your money back. 1.1333 0.04240 90 80 8 2
2619 Looking for some warm fuzzies? 1.1333 0.03844 105 93 10 2
2620 Can’t be careful enough since the crackdown on bodega cats! 1.1333 0.03598 105 92 12 1
2621 And, for an extra five dollars, you get a copy of the pedigree papers. 1.1327 0.03876 113 101 9 3
2622 When Covid pets were all adopted, Frank went to the streets to get top dollar. 1.1327 0.03206 113 98 15 0
2623 They've all been wiped clean and are virtually undetectable at any paw store. 1.1327 0.03444 98 85 13 0
2624 They fell off of a truck ... specifically the tailgate. 1.1327 0.03737 98 86 11 1
2625 If you buy three,the fourth one is free! 1.1327 0.03737 98 86 11 1
2626 These look right up your alley. 1.1327 0.04263 98 88 7 3
2627 They're pedigreed, house trained, and keep perfect time. 1.1327 0.03444 98 85 13 0
2628 For an extra five bucks I'll throw in the coat too! 1.1327 0.03444 98 85 13 0
2629 This’ll make you feel good for good. 1.1327 0.04263 98 88 7 3
2630 You look like a fella who's looking to be led astray. 1.1327 0.03737 98 86 11 1
2631 Think you can buy allergic free love? 1.1327 0.04263 98 88 7 3
2632 Pssst...hey, hey, $25 mix and match grab bag make your own designer cadoodle, siamese schnoodle 1.1327 0.03737 98 86 11 1
2633 'I'm cleaning myself up gradually officer. These days I just turn tricks for heavy petting.' 1.1327 0.03737 98 86 11 1
2634 You bet. They're all purebred. Every one of them. 1.1325 0.04461 83 74 7 2
2635 The fur keeps me warm, and the panting keeps me cool ! 1.1321 0.03809 106 94 10 2
2636 ...and each one comes with a Rolex for a collar! 1.1321 0.04038 106 95 8 3
2637 It's a watch dog. 1.1321 0.04038 106 95 8 3
2638 Psst! Wanna buy a peacoat? 1.1321 0.03809 106 94 10 2
2639 There's no waiting period to conceal carry these babies. 1.1321 0.03566 106 93 12 1
2640 You're right -- I know. Two of them are FAKE Rolex-doodles. 1.1321 0.03566 106 93 12 1
2641 Sold out of Russian Blues, but I’ve got some Havana Browns, and a Euraiser that was just shipped in. 1.1319 0.04196 91 81 8 2
2642 Buy the lot and I’ll throw in a fake Rolex. 1.1319 0.04196 91 81 8 2
2643 You can mix and match 1.1319 0.04196 91 81 8 2
2644 Perfect for a rainy day 1.1319 0.04196 91 81 8 2
2645 Wanna buy a duck instead! 1.1319 0.04477 91 82 6 3
2646 You can tell your wife it just followed you home... 1.1319 0.03894 91 80 10 1
2647 These are perfect to have on hand for a rainy day 1.1319 0.04196 91 81 8 2
2648 I thought you said pocket pussy. 1.1319 0.03894 91 80 10 1
2649 One of these would be a fitting memento of your pet. 1.1319 0.03894 91 80 10 1
2650 They either bark or meow on the hour. 1.1316 0.04040 114 103 7 4
2651 No, they’re not for sale. It’s actually that when I drop the side of my jacket it’s just pure mayhem. 1.1316 0.03636 114 101 11 2
2652 It's better than the internet. 1.1313 0.03702 99 87 11 1
2653 Paris Hilton ain’t got nothin’ on me. 1.1313 0.03970 99 88 9 2
2654 Your local petophile, at your service 1.1313 0.03970 99 88 9 2
2655 Guaranteed, never to grow up. 1.1313 0.03702 99 87 11 1
2656 The poster said "free to a good home," so I'm just a middle-man offering fair prices for any or all! 1.1313 0.04222 99 89 7 3
2657 I’ve got rescues, hypoallergenic, housebroken whatever you need 1.1313 0.03702 99 87 11 1
2658 Where'd I get 'em? They feel of the back of a truck. 1.1313 0.03702 99 87 11 1
2659 These are just avatars. I got the real stuff around the corner. 1.1308 0.03776 107 95 10 2
2660 Go ahead and give one of these puppies a bite and you tell me that it ain't 100% the real deal... 1.1308 0.04002 107 96 8 3
2661 These will make you feel real good kid AND get you lots of likes. 1.1308 0.04217 107 97 6 4
2662 Trust me, would I sell you a pup? 1.1308 0.03776 107 95 10 2
2663 So you return the dogs for the reward and I take a fee. 1.1304 0.04152 92 82 8 2
2664 Sir, I don't think you understand, I'm just looking for my shoes 1.1304 0.04431 92 83 6 3
2665 Pssst! Wanna buy a French Bulldog? 1.1304 0.03530 92 80 12 0
2666 You can just name it Rolex. 1.1304 0.03854 92 81 10 1
2667 Each comes with its own cute little poop bag. 1.1304 0.03854 92 81 10 1
2668 As an added bonus, I’m not charging pet adoption fees or taxes. 1.1304 0.03854 92 81 10 1
2669 Cute, ain’t they? My wife makes ‘em out of old socks and the essence of life. 1.1304 0.03854 92 81 10 1
2670 Having incredible business with the women, they can't believe the size of these pockets! 1.1304 0.03387 115 101 13 1
2671 Your health insurance won’t harass you over therapist fees. 1.1304 0.04431 92 83 6 3
2672 THEY'RE DECLAWED, NEUTERED & TOOTHLESS..! FIVE BUCKS EACH 1.1304 0.03854 92 81 10 1
2673 And they eat next to nothing! 1.1304 0.03854 92 81 10 1
2674 And this one’s the cat you lost three months ago. 1.1304 0.04431 92 83 6 3
2675 I have to be careful to stay on my back, but they're a great way to stay warm at night. 1.1304 0.03154 115 100 15 0
2676 One hit of one of these and you won't be able to experience love any other way. They'll mess up your whole life and you'll still want more 1.1304 0.04152 92 82 8 2
2677 I recommend more than one. 1.1301 0.03643 123 110 10 3
2678 The furs one is always free. 1.1300 0.03933 100 89 9 2
2679 Are you a member of PETA? 1.1300 0.04416 100 91 5 4
2680 No fleas, vet bills, or pet food BUT you can have all the love you can handle! 1.1300 0.03667 100 88 11 1
2681 And they've all had the Covid vaccine 1.1300 0.03667 100 88 11 1
2682 Catus, canis, or cannabis? 1.1300 0.03667 100 88 11 1
2683 What's your pet-ference? 1.1300 0.03933 100 89 9 2
2684 Today’s Special! Take Home Now! Only 4 for $100! Carry Out Coat Included! 1.1300 0.03667 100 88 11 1
2685 ...and every one of them has papers. 1.1300 0.03933 100 89 9 2
2686 Let's talk business...can I tempt you with a Bichon Frisé? 1.1300 0.03667 100 88 11 1
2687 Take all four and I'll throw in the coat. 1.1300 0.03933 100 89 9 2
2688 I call it Don't Knock It Pocket Pets. Want my card? 1.1300 0.03667 100 88 11 1
2689 My stuff is pure. 1.1300 0.03380 100 87 13 0
2690 Cute puppyy!! 1.1299 0.03856 77 67 10 0
2691 I have a great deal on dangerous weapons 1.1296 0.03742 108 96 10 2
2692 Little Ol' Ladies will pay you three times what I'm asking! 1.1294 0.04962 85 78 3 4
2693 Wanna 'get wrecked' those loser slippers? 1.1294 0.04027 85 75 9 1
2694 You know you love them! 1.1294 0.04361 85 76 7 2
2695 In the market for a pocket puppy? 1.1294 0.04361 85 76 7 2
2696 A little back-alley happiness?" 1.1293 0.03576 116 103 11 2
2697 Hey Bud, I've got fur. 1.1293 0.03780 116 104 9 3
2698 Hamsters, you say? Let me get my fanny pack. 1.1290 0.03815 93 82 10 1
2699 Women love it. Just flash the coat and you’ll never go home alone. 1.1290 0.03815 93 82 10 1
2700 They're part kangaroo! 1.1290 0.04385 93 84 6 3
2701 Don't Worry, They'll eat each other 1.1290 0.04110 93 83 8 2
2702 I said I wanted ket, dawg 1.1290 0.03815 93 82 10 1
2703 Wanna buy a slightly used smiling pet? 1.1290 0.03815 93 82 10 1
2704 Man's Best Friend or a Video Star? 1.1290 0.04110 93 83 8 2
2705 As you can see, this coat is really effective when it’s raining cats and dogs. 1.1290 0.04385 93 84 6 3
2706 Of course they come with pedigree papers! 1.1290 0.03815 93 82 10 1
2707 They'll make you feel good! 1.1290 0.03815 93 82 10 1
2708 Him for a penny; them to the pound. 1.1290 0.03495 93 81 12 0
2709 Might I interest you in the gold Felix? 1.1290 0.04110 93 83 8 2
2710 So PETA doesn’t put you on blast, they’re all rescue puppets 1.1290 0.03495 93 81 12 0
2711 It's raincoating cats and dogs... 1.1287 0.03632 101 89 11 1
2712 Yes! OK! They’re mutts but no one will know. 1.1287 0.03632 101 89 11 1
2713 I stopped selling watches. They bark the time when you ask. 1.1287 0.03632 101 89 11 1
2714 It's a special coat for when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.1287 0.03896 101 90 9 2
2715 Wanna be a foster dad? 1.1287 0.03896 101 90 9 2
2716 hikh;ljac 1.1287 0.03896 101 90 9 2
2717 They're all purebred, have their shots and are house-broken. 1.1287 0.03896 101 90 9 2
2718 It was raining cats and dogs last night. 1.1287 0.03632 101 89 11 1
2719 You new on Bumble? Here's what you need. 1.1287 0.04142 101 91 7 3
2720 Real?! This is the purest Petamine you're going to find anywhere in this neighborhood. 1.1287 0.03349 101 88 13 0
2721 I feel you man, this pandemic’s been really tough for me too. Now that’ll be $10k for the Golden Doodle. 1.1287 0.04374 101 92 5 4
2722 Ya gits da poils in one ta two days. 1.1284 0.03710 109 97 10 2
2723 For sale: cuddly coat. 1.1284 0.03710 109 97 10 2
2724 See something you like? 1.1282 0.03749 117 105 9 3
2725 Gotta great deal on a cat/dog pair! 1.1282 0.03333 117 103 13 1
2726 I’ll scratch yours if you scratch mine” 1.1277 0.03777 94 83 10 1
2727 Use your imagination. If you don't own a pet, you can use this coat to smuggle snacks into movie theaters 1.1277 0.04340 94 85 6 3
2728 I, sir, am the epitome of happiness 1.1277 0.04068 94 84 8 2
2729 Of course they are bred and not stolen. 1.1277 0.03460 94 82 12 0
2730 Here’s the real best thrill, my friend: puppet petting! Get a threesome going— you won’t regret it! 1.1277 0.03460 94 82 12 0
2731 Rubbing myself with tuna backfired horribly. 1.1275 0.04103 102 92 7 3
2732 Two for the price of one! 1.1275 0.03859 102 91 9 2
2733 New, never used, AI enabled pets! 1.1275 0.03859 102 91 9 2
2734 The lining is fleas-ced lined. 1.1275 0.04103 102 92 7 3
2735 I'm the city's new animal warden. Which one belongs to you? 1.1275 0.03859 102 91 9 2
2736 Stolen captive creatures. Most ethical prices in town. 1.1275 0.03318 102 89 13 0
2737 They’re going cheap—the fuzz is on our tails. 1.1275 0.03599 102 90 11 1
2738 Aimez-vous le sexe, M. Lebowski? 1.1275 0.03599 102 90 11 1
2739 If you like these I can show you something in gold fish and guppies. 1.1275 0.03599 102 90 11 1
2740 Cheap pets, yeah. But, they're real. Pens and watches are for suckers. 1.1275 0.03318 102 89 13 0
2741 Name your price. I’m all ears. 1.1273 0.03444 110 97 12 1
2742 And they’re all pocket broken. 1.1273 0.03444 110 97 12 1
2743 Get your genuine designer pajama cases! 1.1273 0.03678 110 98 10 2
2744 These are the real deal. They'll make you feel real good. 1.1273 0.03678 110 98 10 2
2745 Look at my coat! 1.1273 0.03444 110 97 12 1
2746 You said you like BuCatkake? 1.1273 0.03678 110 98 10 2
2747 I have more of this in my van, just follow me around the corner 1.1273 0.03678 110 98 10 2
2748 The ASPCA doesn't even know I have them. 1.1271 0.03719 118 106 9 3
2749 ...and for a couple extra bucks I'll throw in a new litter pan and a fire hydrant! 1.1271 0.03306 118 104 13 1
2750 Nobody wears watches anymore. 1.1266 0.04174 79 70 8 1
2751 Perfect time to pick a pet! They will stay pocket sized! 1.1266 0.03765 79 69 10 0
2752 Fur coat? No, I said I have a coat of fur. " 1.1264 0.03939 87 77 9 1
2753 Can I interest you in a snack? 1.1264 0.04265 87 78 7 2
2754 Want a real rescue? 1.1263 0.03426 95 83 12 0
2755 Take a puppy, and I'll throw in a kitten for free! 1.1263 0.03739 95 84 10 1
2756 I’m gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse 1.1263 0.03426 95 83 12 0
2757 Some of them will even shine your shoes 1.1263 0.03426 95 83 12 0
2758 The company put me on fur-lough but I’ve found ways to amews myself. 1.1263 0.04027 95 85 8 2
2759 Hunting Cat Scalper! I used AI and asked how to be a successful trader. 1.1263 0.03739 95 84 10 1
2760 No Littering 1.1262 0.03824 103 92 9 2
2761 Slightly water-damaged but still a better deal than you'll find anywhere else! 1.1262 0.03566 103 91 11 1
2762 pure-breeds, non-rescue 1.1262 0.03566 103 91 11 1
2763 They're clones, but even experts can't tell the difference. 1.1262 0.03566 103 91 11 1
2764 And then I said, sure I’ll watch your pets… 1.1262 0.04065 103 93 7 3
2765 Psst- hey kid. Wanna buy a pet? 1.1262 0.03288 103 90 13 0
2766 the way it works is you start with the cat, and then the dog is the chaser 1.1262 0.03288 103 90 13 0
2767 No, no, this is very different from buying a cat in a sack! 1.1261 0.03646 111 99 10 2
2768 Hey Pal, you're up early. Kitten? You're looking for your kitten? Checkout these beauties. 1.1261 0.03280 119 105 13 1
2769 Get all four and I'll throw in a recipe book!" 1.1250 0.03897 88 78 9 1
2770 You want it, pal, I got it -- hep, alley, cool, feral. 1.1250 0.04253 96 87 6 3
2771 These babies are known to take a licking. 1.1250 0.03546 88 77 11 0
2772 The pet photo is an essential centerpiece to any multi-touch digital dating funnel. 1.1250 0.03259 104 91 13 0
2773 Free toy with each one - I throw in a homeless rat. 1.1250 0.04219 88 79 7 2
2774 Not sure how these cuties got in here, but it' s your lucky day! 1.1250 0.03987 96 86 8 2
2775 Not yours, but available! 1.1250 0.03897 88 78 9 1
2776 These are the new time pieces to wake you up, let you know when to eat & go to sleep at night, interested? 1.1250 0.03546 88 77 11 0
2777 You won't need a Rolodex knockoff. It's always time to play with puppies and kittens. 1.1250 0.03254 120 106 13 1
2778 Find something you're passionate about, and do it better than anyone else, I say. 1.1250 0.03534 104 92 11 1
2779 One month free and then $9.99/month. Cancel anytime! 1.1250 0.03831 112 101 8 3
2780 Ya know......you LOOK like an animal lover. 1.1250 0.03987 96 86 8 2
2781 Don’t worry. I’ve got the cats and dogs covered. 1.1250 0.03897 88 78 9 1
2782 See, I have the entire family and I don't even have to feed them! 1.1250 0.03702 96 85 10 1
2783 As you can see, I have an assortment of adorableness. Sometimes feisty, but mostly adorable. 1.1250 0.03702 96 85 10 1
2784 If you don't like those other watches, I've got these from Catier and Dog Heuer. 1.1250 0.03139 112 98 14 0
2785 Yep, they're all 100% genuine Kats 1.1250 0.04253 96 87 6 3
2786 Psst! Cats and dogs are reigning. 1.1250 0.03534 104 92 11 1
2787 Oh, so their names are Tiffany, Louis, Dolce and Gabbana? 1.1250 0.03386 112 99 12 1
2788 I sell only the best. 100% pure bred pieces. 1.1250 0.03702 96 85 10 1
2789 I got furloughed, but I’ve never been happier 1.1250 0.03702 96 85 10 1
2790 Look at how good at sewing I am! 1.1250 0.04027 104 94 7 3
2791 Im telling you, brands will do anything these days to set their clothing apart from the others. It’s not enough to simply say it’s vegan-friendly clothing anymore 1.1250 0.03987 96 86 8 2
2792 This is a fur lined coat that breathes with you. 1.1239 0.03113 113 99 14 0
2793 Great watch pets! When the heat’s on they swallow the watches! 1.1239 0.03585 113 101 10 2
2794 Gathered them from a poodle when it rained last week. 1.1238 0.04214 105 96 5 4
2795 Yes they do come in pairs! 1.1238 0.03230 105 92 13 0
2796 I got a Louie Cat-on, a Roverlux, a Bark-o-lounger and a cat shmear sweater. Interested! 1.1238 0.03502 105 93 11 1
2797 No. It doesn’t come in double breasted. 1.1238 0.03502 105 93 11 1
2798 Which unlikely pair became a couple? Was it #1 cat-and-dog or #2 dog-and-cat? 1.1238 0.03230 105 92 13 0
2799 Me slide into my siblings’ DMs trying to get them to adopt the animals on the local shelters instagram 1.1238 0.03754 105 94 9 2
2800 Fresh batch from Return to Office Collection 1.1238 0.03754 105 94 9 2
2801 We’ve upgrading. These are watch pets. 1.1237 0.03948 97 87 8 2
2802 Heavier drugs? 1.1237 0.03666 97 86 10 1
2803 Special this week: they're all alive. 1.1237 0.03948 97 87 8 2
2804 Or if pure breeds ain't your fancy, I've got some wonderful rescues here who will just melt your heart. 1.1237 0.04211 97 88 6 3
2805 It's not money that makes one happy- it's the pockets. 1.1237 0.03666 97 86 10 1
2806 Normal NYC subway station interaction. They're not dogs, just blow-dried Gambien pouch rats. 1.1237 0.03948 97 87 8 2
2807 And the best bit: It’s a reversible jacket. 1.1237 0.03666 97 86 10 1
2808 I found a way to stand out in the market, pal. 1.1237 0.03948 97 87 8 2
2809 If you want a snake I gotta roll up my pant leg. 1.1237 0.04211 97 88 6 3
2810 Kittens and puppies are priceless fun, no fighting ever. 1.1237 0.04211 97 88 6 3
2811 I have some good things for you. 1.1237 0.03948 97 87 8 2
2812 The point is, they’re so CUTE, they should be ILLEGAL! 1.1236 0.04469 89 81 5 3
2813 Scout's honor. They are all rescues. 1.1236 0.03855 89 79 9 1
2814 Eww I’m standing in a puddle in my slippers 1.1236 0.04173 89 80 7 2
2815 I can also provide you with documentation that they are emotional support animals. 1.1236 0.04173 89 80 7 2
2816 Guess which one’s named Smiley and you get to buy me lunch. 1.1236 0.04173 89 80 7 2
2817 I used to be in real estate, but as you see I cherish nature. 1.1236 0.03855 89 79 9 1
2818 Spayed? What do you want for a buck? 1.1235 0.03678 81 71 10 0
2819 Only $9.99 each, or 3 for $24.99! 1.1228 0.03968 114 104 6 4
2820 The cheapest kennel you'll find, guaranteed. 1.1228 0.03330 114 101 12 1
2821 Mister! You want filthy puppies and kitties? 1.1226 0.03955 106 96 7 3
2822 Save twenty percent if you join my buyers club. 1.1226 0.03471 106 94 11 1
2823 They are all coat-trained. 1.1226 0.03471 106 94 11 1
2824 Watches are out. Kittens and puppies are in. 1.1226 0.03720 106 95 9 2
2825 Flash Sale…today only 1.1226 0.03720 106 95 9 2
2826 This one here is a Siamese. I brought him from Bangkok myself. 1.1226 0.03471 106 94 11 1
2827 My dear pets love jogging. Fifty bucks for them and my coat. 1.1224 0.03631 98 87 10 1
2828 What? You think I’d sell you a pup! 1.1224 0.03631 98 87 10 1
2829 Lemme guess-single and lonely, right? Well, I got just the cure for that-Love for sale! 1.1224 0.03631 98 87 10 1
2830 Psst I got a great way to break this drought. 1.1224 0.03631 98 87 10 1
2831 Yep. These are available and guaranteed from our parent firm “Pets in a Pocket” 1.1224 0.03631 98 87 10 1
2832 Sure, one each for the kids, one for the Missus & one for mistress ! 1.1224 0.03631 98 87 10 1
2833 I only accept payment in Dogecoin. 1.1224 0.03631 98 87 10 1
2834 For You: Cats and Dogs, or if you want: Dogs and Cats! 1.1224 0.03910 98 88 8 2
2835 Water resistant, too. 1.1224 0.03910 98 88 8 2
2836 Check out these designer knockoffs. 1.1224 0.03631 98 87 10 1
2837 I upgraded from watches. 1.1224 0.03910 98 88 8 2
2838 Psst! They're all designer. 1.1224 0.03631 98 87 10 1
2839 So you want to get rid of your roommate? These are guaranteed the most destructive, sleep interrupting, fur flyers on the market. 1.1224 0.03910 98 88 8 2
2840 Best on the market, you can't get this type of quality anywhere else 1.1224 0.03631 98 87 10 1
2841 Guaranteed to love cheap pet food. 1.1222 0.03815 90 80 9 1
2842 The lining keeps me nice and warm. 1.1222 0.03472 90 79 11 0
2843 They come with a you'll be happy warranty. 1.1222 0.03815 90 80 9 1
2844 Pssst, ever wondered what to do if there are mice in your socks? 1.1222 0.03815 90 80 9 1
2845 No bats this week. 1.1222 0.03472 90 79 11 0
2846 Look, that 's the deal. Don't get cute!" 1.1220 0.04029 82 73 8 1
2847 It was rainin' buckets, then it came down cats and dogs, and now we have this! 1.1220 0.03383 123 110 11 2
2848 And they're trenchcoat-broken, so you can take them anywhere! 1.1220 0.04387 82 74 6 2
2849 Two for nickle, three for a dime. 1.1220 0.03636 82 72 10 0
2850 Christ, what an asshole. 1.1217 0.03526 115 103 10 2
2851 Pssst! Check out these real-time 3D unconditional love tokens. 1.1215 0.03440 107 95 11 1
2852 Since they outlawed the puppy mills I thought arf-arf, how much for that puppy in the raincoat. 1.1215 0.03440 107 95 11 1
2853 For when it's raining cats and dogs. See. 1.1215 0.03440 107 95 11 1
2854 Well IF Drew Panckeri got a laugh , this is a dead cert 1.1215 0.03687 107 96 9 2
2855 I have bigger pets as well, but that would stretch the fabric… 1.1215 0.03440 107 95 11 1
2856 Also, thankfully, they are already toilet trained. 1.1215 0.03687 107 96 9 2
2857 Unconditional love for sale $5:00 1.1215 0.03440 107 95 11 1
2858 Don't make the mistake their owners made 1.1215 0.03687 107 96 9 2
2859 The kittens are free, but the puppies will cost you. 1.1212 0.04130 99 90 6 3
2860 Weatherman said last night it was supposed to rain like cats and dogs. His forecast was actually a four cast! 1.1212 0.03297 99 87 12 0
2861 Maybe you prefer an Asian, Latino or Black. 1.1212 0.03596 99 88 10 1
2862 And don't forget. We offer full health guarantees and after care! 1.1212 0.03596 99 88 10 1
2863 Have you ever gotten high on histamine? 1.1212 0.03872 99 89 8 2
2864 For the price of one new pet, you could have quality life insurance. 1.1212 0.03596 99 88 10 1
2865 Left equals living, left equals living…sir can I interest you in a live dog or cat.? 1.1209 0.03775 91 81 9 1
2866 And this watchdog is a rollex. 1.1209 0.03775 91 81 9 1
2867 Adopt don't shop 1.1209 0.04086 91 82 7 2
2868 And I’ll throw in a cookbook for free! 1.1209 0.03436 91 80 11 0
2869 This IS my fur coat! 1.1209 0.04086 91 82 7 2
2870 This is animal abuse. 1.1209 0.04086 91 82 7 2
2871 Look what’s new! Emotional companion pets. 1.1209 0.03775 91 81 9 1
2872 I’ve got one that will pee on your carpet and one that will chew your table leg off, what will it be? 1.1209 0.03775 91 81 9 1
2873 Sorry, I support gun control. Can I interest you in killing with cuteness? 1.1209 0.03436 91 80 11 0
2874 I’ve learned the AKC is more forgiving than the TSA. 1.1209 0.03775 91 81 9 1
2875 Psst, buddy, just got ‘em in. All canines and felines come with AI. $5 each! 1.1205 0.03595 83 73 10 0
2876 Wouldn't you rather have an emotional support plushie instead of a live animal that needs care every dang day? 1.1204 0.03410 108 96 11 1
2877 The puppies keep you warm in the winter, and the kittens keep you cool in the summer.” 1.1204 0.03884 108 98 7 3
2878 So you want Mr beeaaasstttt!? 1.1200 0.03562 100 89 10 1
2879 This one’s an actual Faberge… for you ten bucks. 1.1200 0.03562 100 89 10 1
2880 We can just replace the Paw Patrol actors on strike with these strays and no one will notice the difference! 1.1200 0.03266 100 88 12 0
2881 You were curious about my allergies? 1.1200 0.03835 100 90 8 2
2882 Now they only watch reruns of Captain Kangaroo. 1.1200 0.03562 100 89 10 1
2883 I see your concern, but look they got alleyway-neutered, and just look how happy they are! 1.1200 0.04090 100 91 6 3
2884 Not in the market for a coat that can handle downpours, huh? Okay. I also got an alligator leather jacket if you're feeling feisty or one really lumpy puffer jacket. 1.1200 0.03562 100 89 10 1
2885 You can only buy these sets of cats & dogs who never fight... here. 1.1200 0.03835 100 90 8 2
2886 Hey, do you wanna buy a lil' guy? 1.1200 0.03266 100 88 12 0
2887 And only a small re- homing fee. 1.1200 0.03562 100 89 10 1
2888 Why wait for the rain, I got them right here 1.1200 0.03835 100 90 8 2
2889 all the love without the paperwork or in home visits 1.1197 0.03468 117 105 10 2
2890 “Everyone was wondering who let the dogs out. Now you know “ 1.1196 0.03401 92 81 11 0
2891 Want a kitten or a puppy? 1.1196 0.04043 92 83 7 2
2892 Their previous owner wore a Rolex. 1.1196 0.04043 92 83 7 2
2893 Just don't tell yer Ma where you got 'em 1.1196 0.03401 92 81 11 0
2894 Psst! Sir, could I interest you in my selection of genuine pets, imported exclusively from the latest tik tok videos? 1.1196 0.04043 92 83 7 2
2895 I'm the catman! Skibby dibby dib yo da dog dog! 1.1196 0.04043 92 83 7 2
2896 Sure,I have Cat Valium. 1.1196 0.03736 92 82 9 1
2897 All of the fur-lined pockets with none of the animal cruelty! 1.1196 0.04043 92 83 7 2
2898 I've got top of the line Swiss imports, straight from the Burnese Mountains. 1.1196 0.04043 92 83 7 2
2899 Genuine Gucci, Prada, Fendi Puppies and Kitties. No knock-offs, the real McCoys 1.1196 0.04043 92 83 7 2
2900 You're lucky to be the first to see these new pets. 1.1196 0.03736 92 82 9 1
2901 Make it rain for me, and I’ll make it rain for you 1.1196 0.03401 92 81 11 0
2902 Puppies out of the bag, too 1.1194 0.03186 134 120 12 2
2903 Guaranteed impeccable pedigree 1.1193 0.03850 109 99 7 3
2904 The coat comes with or without the pets. 1.1193 0.03850 109 99 7 3
2905 They come with a chip of AI dialogue in 345 languages 1.1193 0.03850 109 99 7 3
2906 How about it buddy? They aren't real, just AI versions with low maintenance BUT the ladies love them. 1.1193 0.03119 109 96 13 0
2907 Have I got a pair for you. 1.1193 0.03850 109 99 7 3
2908 Yeah, I've got the good stuff. Pick your poison. 1.1193 0.03380 109 97 11 1
2909 Cell phones put me out of the jewelry business. 1.1190 0.03938 84 75 8 1
2910 I rescued them from a puppy mill. 1.1190 0.03555 84 74 10 0
2911 I ran out of watches, all I have is animals to watch. 1.1188 0.04051 101 92 6 3
2912 I said "hot *kittens*," mister. They're wanted in at least four states. 1.1188 0.03528 101 90 10 1
2913 These are AI enhanced. Their parents are an IBM plugged in in Poughkeepsie. 1.1188 0.03528 101 90 10 1
2914 You have thirty days for any returns. Otherwise they won’t fit in these pockets. 1.1184 0.04576 76 69 5 2
2915 Not only do they come with adoption papers to silence the designer pet critics, we also give you a medal for shutting puppy mills. 1.1183 0.03698 93 83 9 1
2916 Look at my grandchildren. Aren't they cute? 1.1183 0.03698 93 83 9 1
2917 And they come fully housebroken too! 1.1183 0.03698 93 83 9 1
2918 Hey, feeling lonely and depressed? I’ve got just the thing for you! 1.1183 0.03698 93 83 9 1
2919 Gotta catch ‘em all! 1.1183 0.04001 93 84 7 2
2920 Nah, nah they're the real deal. Swiped 'em....er, I mean I 'acquired' them from the breeders myself. 1.1183 0.04001 93 84 7 2
2921 One hundred percent pure - not cut with anything. 1.1183 0.03698 93 83 9 1
2922 Bet you want what they're having? 1.1182 0.03092 110 97 13 0
2923 Buy a pet, rent a pet, impress your therapist.Cheaper than a child. Poop bags, kitty litter additional, pet insurance at bargain prices. 1.1182 0.03092 110 97 13 0
2924 I’m only selling the coat. It’s also my way of saving on a pet sitter. 1.1182 0.03092 110 97 13 0
2925 They're called Pocket Pets. Trust me, it's the next big thing! 1.1182 0.03591 110 99 9 2
2926 They are all plushy rescues. 1.1182 0.03591 110 99 9 2
2927 Only $500 each! 1.1176 0.03413 119 107 10 2
2928 Buy 3 and get one free...excuse me...set one free 1.1176 0.03496 102 91 10 1
2929 Are you a dog or a cat person? 1.1176 0.03763 102 92 8 2
2930 Wanna little woof tonight? How about some purr? 1.1176 0.03197 119 106 12 1
2931 all YOU does is feed 'em, and they pees n poops all over, and goofs off. 1.1176 0.04238 85 77 6 2
2932 And they're all pedigree 1.1176 0.03893 85 76 8 1
2933 These are premium pets, pal. I don't sell knock-offs. 1.1176 0.03206 102 90 12 0
2934 They're real! 1.1176 0.03515 85 75 10 0
2935 Hey, these ain't no ordinary puppets. They're genuine French fantoches! 1.1176 0.03496 102 91 10 1
2936 Ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny. 1.1176 0.03893 85 76 8 1
2937 It’s 100% cotton. 1.1176 0.03763 102 92 8 2
2938 PocketPet 1.1176 0.03893 85 76 8 1
2939 Each purebread comes with an official adoption certificate so your friends won't judge you! 1.1171 0.03560 111 100 9 2
2940 Yes sir, each one is a genuine Rolex! 1.1170 0.03660 94 84 9 1
2941 Psst. Soaker, sprinkle, or spritz? 1.1170 0.03961 94 85 7 2
2942 Aren't these cute? There's plenty more where these came from. So special deal today! 1.1170 0.03333 94 83 11 0
2943 For only $100 you can say that you rescued an animal! 1.1170 0.03660 94 84 9 1
2944 Want some p***y? (you fill in the stars) 1.1170 0.03961 94 85 7 2
2945 I also have a full line of dogs 1.1170 0.03333 94 83 11 0
2946 Of course these are all phony. I keep the genuine articles in my van. 1.1170 0.03660 94 84 9 1
2947 Buy three, get one free! 1.1170 0.03660 94 84 9 1
2948 Just go ahead. Grab ‘em. 1.1170 0.03961 94 85 7 2
2949 Hey pal, I'm offering you the greatest relationship you'll ever have. Unlike your facebook friends, this is real. Can you really put a price on that? 1.1170 0.03961 94 85 7 2
2950 Jewelry is so passe. 1.1170 0.03333 94 83 11 0
2951 One of these accessories would make that outfit more in. 1.1170 0.03961 94 85 7 2
2952 İf you want to buy illegal stuff, ask my friends instead. 1.1167 0.03385 120 108 10 2
2953 Nothing but pure bred Rolexes ! 1.1165 0.03463 103 92 10 1
2954 Trust me, they've had their shots. 1.1165 0.03728 103 93 8 2
2955 Psst. — you wanna buy a watchdog? 1.1165 0.03728 103 93 8 2
2956 How would you like a hanging of cats and dog? 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
2957 You look like a young man who could use a little cute. 1.1163 0.03477 86 76 10 0
2958 Senior Citizen Special! Two for the price of one! 1.1163 0.04191 86 78 6 2
2959 You can have them for an indecent price!! 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
2960 well, smart phones just killed my black market watch business 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
2961 They'll never be able to tell it's not a pure bred. 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
2962 Petophilia? 1.1163 0.04191 86 78 6 2
2963 Flasher 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
2964 And they’re self-winding. 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
2965 You want a snake? I got snakes too. 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
2966 I’m practicing to be a Magician! 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
2967 This is our top of the line buddy jacket featuring our ultra-cozy, temperature controlled safety pockets with automatic treat dispensers. 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
2968 Buy all four for the price of three. And there's no sales tax either! 1.1161 0.03040 112 99 13 0
2969 I got the idea from the big rain last month. 1.1158 0.03624 95 85 9 1
2970 Lonely kid? Special deal for you on one of these! Isolated, forlorn, detached, depressed and disjointed I recommend all four! 1.1158 0.04197 95 87 5 3
2971 These little guys are the result of last night's severe rainstorm. 1.1158 0.03624 95 85 9 1
2972 Meow" "You know what that is right?" "The Sound of Freedom" "Can't you see the pussy kitties and baby bitches I got here?" "Are you the man from O.R.G.Y?" "Actually, my name is Kissinger and this is my side hustle." "You've lived a long, long life. 1.1158 0.03921 95 86 7 2
2973 The kittens, particularly, purr like a Swiss watch... 1.1158 0.03300 95 84 11 0
2974 Fashionistas say Pussy Hats are coming back. How about a sweet accessory for the lady in you life? 1.1158 0.03624 95 85 9 1
2975 Same raincoat but I added pants and handpuppets 1.1158 0.03300 95 84 11 0
2976 Hey kid, want to buy a -nine? 1.1158 0.03624 95 85 9 1
2977 Lost your puppy? I got you covered 1.1158 0.03624 95 85 9 1
2978 Yeah, sometimes I show off other things, but I like to mix it up a little and keep them guessing. 1.1154 0.03694 104 94 8 2
2979 You hold one close to your face and breathe in deeply. Guaranteed euphoric experience! 1.1154 0.03432 104 93 10 1
2980 Yeah, highest quality! Persiann, Buldog, Grate Dane, Caliko... 1.1154 0.03148 104 92 12 0
2981 And as an added bonus, I'll give you several City phone books for potty training 1.1154 0.03432 104 93 10 1
2982 The ultimate choice - between cats and dogs? 1.1149 0.03439 87 77 10 0
2983 I got them on discount from my brother Freddy, who's in the animal industry. 1.1149 0.03439 87 77 10 0
2984 Psss. Hey kiddo. Wanna buy some crypto kitties and doge NFTs? 1.1149 0.03439 87 77 10 0
2985 . . . and if you're looking for something a little more exotic, I can show you the "reptile house" I have parked around the corner. 1.1149 0.04144 87 79 6 2
2986 You never know when you might need an impromptu cuddle! 1.1149 0.03439 87 77 10 0
2987 'Plan now. The next natural disaster or pandemic is imminent. Take advantage of pre-apocalyptic pricing.' 1.1149 0.03808 87 78 8 1
2988 These are the best bad people locators. Look it up. 1.1149 0.03439 87 77 10 0
2989 It’s similar to drugs but it also shits in your house 1.1149 0.03439 87 77 10 0
2990 Hey buddy….limited time deal. Buy one, get one to follow you home. 1.1149 0.03808 87 78 8 1
2991 You thought I had voters in here. Heh-heh! 1.1146 0.04154 96 88 5 3
2992 They come with a guaranteed best friend lifetime warrantee. 1.1146 0.03881 96 87 7 2
2993 This coat's perfect for when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.1146 0.03881 96 87 7 2
2994 I got the best dopamine on the block. 1.1146 0.03881 96 87 7 2
2995 Sorry, but do you know how hard it is to get French bulldogs these days? 1.1146 0.03588 96 86 9 1
2996 Tonight’s the night my friend 1.1146 0.03588 96 86 9 1
2997 The shelter is low on space, but they've all be vaccinated. 1.1143 0.03120 105 93 12 0
2998 This side is rentals for Bumble profiles. The other side is for sale. 1.1143 0.03660 105 95 8 2
2999 Love them! Love them, I said! 1.1139 0.03597 79 70 9 0
3000 And each one comes with a free Pedigree Certificate! 1.1136 0.04099 88 80 6 2
3001 Hey you want some dougs, oh yeah there are cats too. 1.1136 0.04099 88 80 6 2
3002 Get 'em dry, before it rains. 1.1136 0.04406 88 81 4 3
3003 Pure gold. 1.1136 0.03403 88 78 10 0
3004 Instant mood boosters, but I can only sell you one because you might OD on too much happiness. 1.1136 0.03767 88 79 8 1
3005 You saved a bundle with the moissanite ring, but she'll still need affection and companionship. 1.1136 0.04099 88 80 6 2
3006 Spayed and vaxxed, but they will always love you for your career. 1.1134 0.03843 97 88 7 2
3007 And the best feature of our new line of Climate Change- Accommodating Raincoats is this set of inside catch-all pockets for heavy precipitation days when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.1134 0.03843 97 88 7 2
3008 I’ll throw in the fleas for free. 1.1134 0.03553 97 87 9 1
3009 This is the most precious of our stock 1.1134 0.04113 97 89 5 3
3010 Don’t go barking around town about this, I don’t want the cat the get out of the bag. 1.1134 0.04113 97 89 5 3
3011 They fell out the back of a larger, more adult animal 1.1132 0.03370 106 95 10 1
3012 Buy now & I'll give You 2 of your choice for the price of one. 1.1130 0.03213 115 103 11 1
3013 You can't even tell they're mixed! 1.1130 0.03442 115 104 9 2
3014 It was raining cats and dogs. So I picked up a few cheap. 1.1125 0.03555 80 71 9 0
3015 Each comes with a pre-followed instagram account 1.1125 0.04355 80 73 5 2
3016 Look, pal, I don't think you understand... Epstein didn't kill himself! Ya see, I think... wait, where's Shelly? 1.1124 0.04055 89 81 6 2
3017 Hey Bud,Lookin for a best friend? 1.1124 0.03727 89 80 8 1
3018 I recently changed my life around but I still prefer to work in this location. 1.1124 0.03367 89 79 10 0
3019 Your choice… felines $800, canines $1500. A bargain! 1.1124 0.03367 89 79 10 0
3020 I can tell you’re a man who recognizes quality. 1.1124 0.04055 89 81 6 2
3021 Now I know you've heard of an alley cat, but what if I told you I had, not one, but two alley dogs? 1.1124 0.03367 89 79 10 0
3022 Cat and dog hand puppets You don't have to feed them and you can put then in the washer.... I'll give you a great two for one ! 1.1124 0.04055 89 81 6 2
3023 They tap out time with their paws and come and lick your face when it's time to get up. 1.1124 0.03727 89 80 8 1
3024 It’s the Whack-A-Mole Travel Edition. 1.1124 0.03727 89 80 8 1
3025 That’s right, you’re a puppet, I’m a puppet and now you can own your very own. 1.1122 0.03205 98 87 11 0
3026 My love for animals has cost me everything. Any help would be appreciated. 1.1122 0.03805 98 89 7 2
3027 We are all rescues The kittens & puppies and my coat from these kittens & puppies 1.1122 0.03518 98 88 9 1
3028 I used to sell life insurance. 1.1121 0.03340 107 96 10 1
3029 My AI created them, but you only have to pay me. 1.1121 0.03186 116 104 11 1
3030 This stylish coat is ideal for Take Your Pet to Work day! 1.1121 0.03626 116 106 7 3
3031 Yup--I'm a pick-pocket with pocket pets. Interested? 1.1111 0.03385 117 106 9 2
3032 Hey man, wanna impress your friends?? I got some Rescue going cheap here." 1.1111 0.04303 81 74 5 2
3033 These are a guaranteed source of amusement for zoom meetings. 1.1111 0.03687 90 81 8 1
3034 When the dog bites, when the bee stings, when I'm feeling sad . . . Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens 1.1111 0.03687 90 81 8 1
3035 Best in Show material! Heavy discount, ‘cause I got a good feeling about you! 1.1111 0.03175 99 88 11 0
3036 Wanna buy a pet?" 1.1111 0.03175 99 88 11 0
3037 One isn't often thirsty and is best suited if you live in the southwest, another likes the cold so the northeast,and yet another loves to swim. The 4th is great for search and rescue. 1.1111 0.03331 90 80 10 0
3038 Shop! Don’t adopt! 1.1111 0.03687 90 81 8 1
3039 Designer dogs & cats at discount prices, if you buy a dog, I’ll throw in a cat for free. 1.1111 0.03331 90 80 10 0
3040 'They are all black mark-ed." 1.1111 0.04011 90 82 6 2
3041 Choose one. Their basically all the same. Like elections used to be 1.1111 0.03687 90 81 8 1
3042 These are some of the best pets you'll find on the flea market. 1.1111 0.04011 90 82 6 2
3043 We're going to Disney World! 1.1111 0.03928 81 73 7 1
3044 It’s your lucky day, it rained a storm last week 1.1111 0.04033 99 91 5 3
3045 It's a good deal, with this weather it's the last four I have 1.1111 0.03687 90 81 8 1
3046 Pocket trained AND cute! What more could you ask for? 1.1111 0.03331 90 80 10 0
3047 Guaranteed safe for kids and carpets. 1.1111 0.03768 99 90 7 2
3048 Psst, hey buddy… Best pussy you can find, at this price buddy! 1.1111 0.04303 81 74 5 2
3049 It’s almost a fur coat. 1.1111 0.03928 81 73 7 1
3050 Hey! Want to adopt a pet? 1.1111 0.03687 90 81 8 1
3051 These are the real McCoy, pal, 100 percent AKC - I don't deal in rescues. 1.1111 0.03484 99 89 9 1
3052 They’re looking for a loving Home Page. 1.1111 0.03687 90 81 8 1
3053 They were Barbies and Kens before Oppenheimer blew them up. 1.1111 0.03687 90 81 8 1
3054 Fresh from the last time it rained cats and dogs. 1.1111 0.03514 81 72 9 0
3055 I couldn’t find a rabbit or a top hat 1.1111 0.03597 117 107 7 3
3056 I told you I had the goods 1.1111 0.03514 81 72 9 0
3057 Hey fella, wanna make it rain? 1.1111 0.04011 90 82 6 2
3058 You think you're depressed now,? Just give one of these babies a decade or so. 1.1111 0.03484 99 89 9 1
3059 They were raised together by a goat. This one bleats, this one barks a meow, this one meows a bark, and this one screams when you point your phone camera at it. 1.1111 0.03687 90 81 8 1
3060 Support your local bi-animal community! Dog/Cat couples for sale! 1.1101 0.03531 109 99 8 2
3061 Buy one, get one free. BOGO 1.1101 0.03531 109 99 8 2
3062 These babies are definitely the pick of the litter. 1.1100 0.03145 100 89 11 0
3063 PetCo may have banned you, but PetMo has you what you need, my friend. 1.1100 0.03451 100 90 9 1
3064 Sorry, I'm fresh out of gerbils this week, but check these cuties out! 1.1100 0.03145 100 89 11 0
3065 Hey, buddy, these pets have been especially selected to be house trained and flea free. 1.1100 0.03732 100 91 7 2
3066 Great Mouse-Keepers! 1.1100 0.03451 100 90 9 1
3067 And these two keep purrfect time. 1.1100 0.03145 100 89 11 0
3068 So you want the dometicated pets or not. 1.1100 0.03145 100 89 11 0
3069 AND they tell time! 1.1100 0.03451 100 90 9 1
3070 The dogist recommends 1.1100 0.03994 100 92 5 3
3071 Instagram, Hinge, Tinder… whatever you want. $10 per photo. 1.1100 0.03451 100 90 9 1
3072 Purring guaranteed, or how 'bout a genuine, top-notch watchdog? 1.1099 0.03969 91 83 6 2
3073 These babies meme themselves! 1.1099 0.03969 91 83 6 2
3074 I was asking if you had any petticoats. 1.1099 0.03297 91 81 10 0
3075 Pick a cat ya gotta take two,they're bonded. 1.1099 0.03297 91 81 10 0
3076 Yeah buddy, these are the illegal breeds in San Francisco 1.1099 0.03969 91 83 6 2
3077 Do I have the time? How about play time! 1.1099 0.03969 91 83 6 2
3078 The best props for a thirst trap! 1.1099 0.03648 91 82 8 1
3079 Black Market"? No, they were made by my AI yesterday morning 1.1099 0.04265 91 84 4 3
3080 These are authentic biscuit makers 1.1099 0.03648 91 82 8 1
3081 Each comes with forged ‘rescue’ papers avoiding the stigma of having bought from a reputable breeder like myself. 1.1098 0.03883 82 74 7 1
3082 Two kittens for $10 and you get a puppy free. 1.1098 0.03883 82 74 7 1
3083 Gotta catch a plane back to Sweden....last of my palace collection ...they will get you into places you never imagined at this price. 1.1089 0.03418 101 91 9 1
3084 Squirelly shit show lil' shaver, you can't go wrong with one of these dead cats. 1.1089 0.03697 101 92 7 2
3085 The last person who came by, said that I am a weirdo 1.1089 0.03115 101 90 11 0
3086 I wanted to retire, but this one last case was too cute to pass up. 1.1087 0.03263 92 82 10 0
3087 I also sell Oxy! 1.1087 0.03927 92 84 6 2
3088 Wanna see the truly weird on the right? 1.1087 0.03927 92 84 6 2
3089 This one comes with the six-kitten cuddle package. 1.1087 0.03610 92 83 8 1
3090 I used to be a ferret wrangler... 1.1087 0.03610 92 83 8 1
3091 This is where we're headed with your president: black-market food sources. 1.1087 0.03927 92 84 6 2
3092 And they all come with registration papers from the International Kennel Society. 1.1087 0.03263 92 82 10 0
3093 Better than your alarm clock! 1.1087 0.03610 92 83 8 1
3094 do you want two cats or two dogs or 4 massive poos 1.1087 0.03927 92 84 6 2
3095 It keeps your litter off the streets 1.1087 0.03263 92 82 10 0
3096 My online taxidermy classes will have you doing work like this in no time. 1.1087 0.03610 92 83 8 1
3097 They play mixed doubles. 1.1087 0.03263 92 82 10 0
3098 how much is a snuggle? well buy me dinner first, son! 1.1087 0.03927 92 84 6 2
3099 #High or low maintenance? 1.1087 0.03610 92 83 8 1
3100 Need to have my anti-depressants right in my pocket here 1.1087 0.03263 92 82 10 0
3101 Every one of them from a genuine, 24 carat home ! 1.1084 0.03838 83 75 7 1
3102 They're adorable, but they could pick your pocket. 1.1084 0.03434 83 74 9 0
3103 Sorry I'm all out of Horse, however... 1.1084 0.04203 83 76 5 2
3104 It’s identical to what Paris Hilton wears. 1.1084 0.03838 83 75 7 1
3105 Can't miss this binary, rat-protection and happiness plan. 1.1084 0.04203 83 76 5 2
3106 I was expecting something more for mature taste! 1.1081 0.03225 111 100 10 1
3107 Really! Genuine freeze-dried hand puppets. 1.1078 0.03386 102 92 9 1
3108 See, I'm looking to get a bigger coat. I can't win Tic-Tac-Toe on a 2x2 grid. 1.1078 0.03086 102 91 11 0
3109 My wife cleans three of these jackets a week 1.1078 0.03662 102 93 7 2
3110 All mad in America 1.1078 0.03386 102 92 9 1
3111 The cat distribution system is working wonders 1.1078 0.03386 102 92 9 1
3112 Today's special: purebred hot dogs and alley cats 1.1078 0.03386 102 92 9 1
3113 This special never ends... Adopt two & get another two at no charge 1.1075 0.03887 93 85 6 2
3114 I got these from the SPCA, I could give you one for a good price. 1.1075 0.03573 93 84 8 1
3115 Sir, I get that all the time. NO, I don't have a snake to show you. 1.1075 0.03573 93 84 8 1
3116 In case you were wondering, I'm a Republican. 1.1075 0.03887 93 85 6 2
3117 If there was no paper trail, Mike’s landlord might not know he got a pet… 1.1075 0.03573 93 84 8 1
3118 Technically, they're 'Dawggs' and 'Kyttynnz' but no one can tell unless they look really close. 1.1075 0.03887 93 85 6 2
3119 I got Tiktok gold here! 1.1071 0.03794 84 76 7 1
3120 They can’t tell time, but they do poop every two hours 1.1071 0.03794 84 76 7 1
3121 Or would you prefer a less eager sort? 1.1071 0.04155 84 77 5 2
3122 All four are “chick magnets,” but the cats attract a more mature variety of chicken. 1.1071 0.03395 84 75 9 0
3123 And they’re all certified ‘woke!’ 1.1071 0.03794 84 76 7 1
3124 Ok... hang on. Since you’re not a musical enthusiast, I also got these live ones. 1.1071 0.03395 84 75 9 0
3125 I HAVE A FEW COMPLAINTS, YES, BUT THIS MY PET, PEAVE 1.1068 0.03058 103 92 11 0
3126 Since these are little off brand, the dog perr and the cats bark, I can give you an extraordinary low price and include doggie and cat treats. 1.1068 0.03058 103 92 11 0
3127 You've heard of 3 ducks in a trench coat, but what about... 1.1068 0.03628 103 94 7 2
3128 Genuine Siamese kits or scotch pups. Take your pick. 1.1068 0.03355 103 93 9 1
3129 I scooped them up in that heavy rainstorm yesterday, pretty cute for appearing spontaneously in an atmospheric event, ain't they? 1.1064 0.03197 94 84 10 0
3130 As a retiree, I find catnapping especially rejuvenating. 1.1064 0.03537 94 85 8 1
3131 The paw shop 1.1064 0.03197 94 84 10 0
3132 SPIRITUAL, NOT RELIGIOUS? HERE'S THE BEST YOU CAN DO 1.1064 0.03847 94 86 6 2
3133 How can you say no to a face like that? 1.1064 0.03847 94 86 6 2
3134 You got pets, right? For $89.99 you can have a coat that can take them with with you anywhere. 1.1064 0.03537 94 85 8 1
3135 just picked those up in the last rainstorm 1.1064 0.03537 94 85 8 1
3136 Tinkle proof. 1.1064 0.03847 94 86 6 2
3137 Pssst. Want to buy some happiness? 1.1064 0.03537 94 85 8 1
3138 Your pick of the litter, only five bucks. 1.1059 0.03357 85 76 9 0
3139 These are portable pets. They even come with a fake certificate! 1.1059 0.03357 85 76 9 0
3140 They're all housetrained. 1.1059 0.03357 85 76 9 0
3141 Of course, they're pink! Did you think they were from Oppenheimer? 1.1059 0.04108 85 78 5 2
3142 No watches today, but buy one of these and they'll watch over you. 1.1058 0.03030 104 93 11 0
3143 No papers,but look at them smile! 1.1058 0.03594 104 95 7 2
3144 One of these cuties is the key to the next lady you like. 1.1058 0.03594 104 95 7 2
3145 The dogs and cats will poop together, if we can scoop together. 1.1058 0.03594 104 95 7 2
3146 This is a genuine virgin fleas lined coat” 1.1058 0.03324 104 94 9 1
3147 Wanna buy a duck? 1.1053 0.03165 95 85 10 0
3148 I got Puppers, Bowsers, whaddya need? 1.1053 0.03501 95 86 8 1
3149 "Catch as catch can" Roderick Forsman, 603-662-8697 1.1053 0.03165 95 85 10 0
3150 And these are useful if you want just a slight drizzle 1.1053 0.03501 95 86 8 1
3151 Fugazi? No, fu-paws-zi. 1.1053 0.03808 95 87 6 2
3152 Now , this is the time! 1.1053 0.03382 114 104 8 2
3153 there's a shortage on Adderall but these'll give ya a solid dopamine hit 1.1053 0.03501 95 86 8 1
3154 You don't need a watch if you own a pet. 1.1048 0.03561 105 96 7 2
3155 I can let you have these lifelike animal slippers at a huge discount. 1.1048 0.03561 105 96 7 2
3156 (House)Breaking Bad. 1.1047 0.03709 86 78 7 1
3157 Not for sale, for "adoption." 1.1047 0.03709 86 78 7 1
3158 They ain't hot. 1.1047 0.03320 86 77 9 0
3159 I've got Russian Blue Dream, Jack Russell Herer, Purple Puppy Haze or Sour Puss Diesel. 1.1047 0.03709 86 78 7 1
3160 Works better than weeds! 1.1047 0.03709 86 78 7 1
3161 Great place to put them when it rains that hard. 1.1042 0.03134 96 86 10 0
3162 You don't wanna know where I keep the goldfish. 1.1042 0.03466 96 87 8 1
3163 We have a special price of $500 each for sleep walkers! 1.1042 0.03769 96 88 6 2
3164 My undercover pets carry flea pedigrees. 1.1042 0.03466 96 87 8 1
3165 Of course they're fakes, but your friends will never know the difference. 1.1042 0.03466 96 87 8 1
3166 I like the kitty.” 1.1042 0.03769 96 88 6 2
3167 Trust me, buddy. This is just what you need to light up your socials and get more followers. 1.1042 0.03466 96 87 8 1
3168 The cats only come in one size 1.1042 0.03466 96 87 8 1
3169 I got all the brands you've heard of: Pupee, Ki-ten, you name it. 1.1039 0.04369 77 71 4 2
3170 Take two and call me in the morning. You won’t be depressed no more. 1.1039 0.04369 77 71 4 2
3171 It was raining heavily. I was only able to catch these few 1.1038 0.03264 106 96 9 1
3172 And the best thing is, I can truly say they're all authentic. 1.1038 0.03264 106 96 9 1
3173 That dog? That dog will cost you ten dollars. 1.1038 0.03529 106 97 7 2
3174 Guaranteed you tube star power. 1.1038 0.03264 106 96 9 1
3175 And each one comes with a genuine Rolex! 1.1038 0.03529 106 97 7 2
3176 Hot rescues from the Westminster Dog Show of 2023. 1.1034 0.03284 87 78 9 0
3177 Yes, they're trained.... killers. 1.1034 0.03668 87 79 7 1
3178 Doggie downers, puppy uppers, and catnip with THC. 1.1034 0.03284 87 78 9 0
3179 You look like you could use a cool cat or lucky dog? 1.1034 0.03284 87 78 9 0
3180 The Rolex watches kept on ticking while these keep on licking. 1.1034 0.03668 87 79 7 1
3181 Is this legal? 1.1034 0.03284 87 78 9 0
3182 We’re trying to improve our reputation. 1.1034 0.03668 87 79 7 1
3183 Meet the 'Pocket Pets!' So tiny, so discreet , you can sneak them into any establishment! Trying to pick up a chick whose NOT RESPONDING to your lines? Pull out one of the Pocket Pets and watch her melt before your eyes...! 1.1034 0.04016 87 80 5 2
3184 The tax is short for taxidermy. 1.1034 0.03668 87 79 7 1
3185 As you can see, they are guaranteed Housecoat trained 1.1031 0.03104 97 87 10 0
3186 I pass the saving onto you by not spaying or neutering them. 1.1031 0.03432 97 88 8 1
3187 Why go to the pound when you can get your puppies and kitties right here. Fresh puppy! Get your warm, cuddly puppy! 1.1031 0.03432 97 88 8 1
3188 This isn’t just a raincoat 1.1031 0.03104 97 87 10 0
3189 They'll be gone in a flash. 1.1031 0.03732 97 89 6 2
3190 Guaranteed authentic World Cup knock-offs; kittens free with purchase. 1.1031 0.03104 97 87 10 0
3191 I’m a bit of a litterbug myself! 1.1031 0.03432 97 88 8 1
3192 These have pedigree you'd never get at the SPCA.. 1.1031 0.03432 97 88 8 1
3193 Breathing and walking are so overrated! 1.1028 0.03497 107 98 7 2
3194 I only had fake Rolexes, but these are authentic cuties. 1.1023 0.03249 88 79 9 0
3195 Guaranteed purebred. They fell off the back of a truck. 1.1023 0.03249 88 79 9 0
3196 Official looking papers are only ten bucks more. 1.1023 0.03972 88 81 5 2
3197 Pssss...I got yer standard fluffy paws and cold noses 1.1023 0.03628 88 80 7 1
3198 Careful, this fur coat moults 1.1023 0.03249 88 79 9 0
3199 Hey! Wanna be a REAL pack leader?! 1.1023 0.03628 88 80 7 1
3200 You want something more exotic? How about a one-eyed trouser snake? 1.1020 0.03399 98 89 8 1
3201 Guaranteed not to shed! 1.1020 0.03695 98 90 6 2
3202 Don’t rat me out. 1.1020 0.03695 98 90 6 2
3203 Runts are half price 1.1020 0.03073 98 88 10 0
3204 Look how many pets I can fit in this coat! 1.1020 0.03073 98 88 10 0
3205 I've got 'em in spaydes.... 1.1020 0.03073 98 88 10 0
3206 Who needs health insurance when I can offer you this? 1.1020 0.03399 98 89 8 1
3207 Hey buddy, want a hot dog? 1.1020 0.03399 98 89 8 1
3208 Counter-Pet?! They look fake to you? 1.1020 0.03695 98 90 6 2
3209 Look how many of my pets I can fit in this coat! 1.1019 0.03206 108 98 9 1
3210 I will trade you my Rolex for all four. 1.1013 0.03416 79 71 8 0
3211 Cheapest bitches and pussies in the city. 1.1011 0.03929 89 82 5 2
3212 Be honest. Does this make me look like an Ass? 1.1011 0.03589 89 81 7 1
3213 They may be knock-offs, but who's gonna know. 1.1011 0.03214 89 80 9 0
3214 Most of these are alleycats. 1.1011 0.03929 89 82 5 2
3215 @graceemcfadden “paw-don me, but are you looking fur good stuff” 1.1011 0.03589 89 81 7 1
3216 Well, my emotional support animals needed their own emotional support animals. 1.1011 0.03589 89 81 7 1
3217 Psst, hey buddy. Take a look at these little beauties! 1.1010 0.03366 99 90 8 1
3218 You look like you need a baby furry! 1.1010 0.03366 99 90 8 1
3219 Or, how about a deep abiding sense of emotional fulfillment? Think you can handle it? 1.1010 0.03044 99 89 10 0
3220 These will have you T-R-I-P-P-I-N' for sure. 1.1010 0.03366 99 90 8 1
3221 See? I couldn't be a rat! 1.1010 0.03366 99 90 8 1
3222 Heard you were looking for free love. 1.1010 0.03659 99 91 6 2
3223 "Like I said, they are even half price and the micro-chip has been removed! I even washed them at Pet depot!" Tracy Brown, Athens, GA 1.1010 0.03366 99 90 8 1
3224 I've been rehabilitated. 1.1010 0.03659 99 91 6 2
3225 You gotta take all four. They're related. Local, you know. 1.1010 0.03366 99 90 8 1
3226 This is a better look for me! 1.1010 0.04185 99 93 2 4
3227 They're stuffed animals... if you know what I mean. 1.1010 0.03366 99 90 8 1
3228 You'll never guess what it rained. 1.1010 0.03366 99 90 8 1
3229 Free Fancy Feast and Royal Canin included. 1.1009 0.03674 109 101 5 3
3230 Discover the hilarious hocus-pocus my coat's critters can conjure!" From: Kishore Kumar Soma Hyderabad India Mobile No. +91986639921 1.1000 0.03624 100 92 6 2
3231 Besides, a watch won’t nuzzle you awake. 1.1000 0.02873 110 99 11 0
3232 You thought I was a flasher because of my trenchcoat? Exhi-bite-ionism would be purrrverse 1.1000 0.03815 80 73 6 1
3233 Collars are extra. 1.1000 0.03375 80 72 8 0
3234 Best in the market currently - I guarantee you a dopamine rush. 1.1000 0.03015 100 90 10 0
3235 The barkless, pooplesss models cost extra. 1.1000 0.03815 80 73 6 1
3236 I never really left being in The Pet Shop Boys behind. 1.1000 0.03551 90 82 7 1
3237 Ya, they’re real. Simply sew the included pocket to your sweatshirt and your little friend is always ready to lick your face. 1.1000 0.03333 100 91 8 1
3238 These are what we call " Hush puppies and Hush kitties " 1.1000 0.03333 100 91 8 1
3239 Any one of these cute babies will kill without a trace 1.1000 0.03551 90 82 7 1
3240 Wow! It's a puppy dealer! 1.1000 0.03333 100 91 8 1
3241 I usually wear it with a pair of snakeskin boots... 1.1000 0.03333 100 91 8 1
3242 Litter's illegal 1.1000 0.03333 100 91 8 1
3243 Can I interest you in a stuffed animal? 1.1000 0.03551 90 82 7 1
3244 Hey slippers! Pick your pouch pair for pennies. 1.1000 0.03887 90 83 5 2
3245 Chicks dig 'em... 1.1000 0.03375 80 72 8 0
3246 No watches available, so how about a pet? 1.1000 0.03887 90 83 5 2
3247 Normally these kangaroos go for thousands, but for you, fifty dollars each. 1.1000 0.03180 90 81 9 0
3248 You can tell all of your friends that you got a rescue. 1.1000 0.03551 90 82 7 1
3249 Totally waterproof... unless it's been raining cats and dogs 1.1000 0.03551 90 82 7 1
3250 My watches were confiscated . 1.1000 0.03815 80 73 6 1
3251 I gave the new yorker an offer they couldn't refuse 1.1000 0.03375 80 72 8 0
3252 I can tell by your decision to wear a track suit and slippers to this dark alley that you are depressed. Don’t mind the kittens and puppies - I’ve got some Wellbutrin in my inside coat pocket. 1.0991 0.03123 111 101 9 1
3253 I've got Gucci, Armani, Prada and Givenchy! 1.0991 0.02849 111 100 11 0
3254 I'll give you a good deal on the Tabby! 1.0990 0.02987 101 91 10 0
3255 Kind buds? 1.0989 0.03147 91 82 9 0
3256 Same quality, fewer ticks! 1.0989 0.03845 91 84 5 2
3257 It's companionship.. a personal community that will bring out the love in your nature!" ^..^ 1.0989 0.03513 91 83 7 1
3258 Hey, fanboy—whosa cutie? Wanna buy? 1.0989 0.03845 91 84 5 2
3259 If the election were today 1.0989 0.03513 91 83 7 1
3260 Looks like you could use the "littlest pet shop" 1.0989 0.03845 91 84 5 2
3261 Guaranteed house-trained. 1.0989 0.03513 91 83 7 1
3262 They walk on all twos but they are four! 1.0989 0.03147 91 82 9 0
3263 Dig my petty coat. 1.0989 0.03147 91 82 9 0
3264 This one's got a real kick. 1.0988 0.03336 81 73 8 0
3265 Any one of these will make a fine cover for your driver 1.0988 0.03336 81 73 8 0
3266 They killin', aint' they? 1.0984 0.03168 122 112 8 2
3267 Made you smile! 1.0980 0.03271 102 93 8 1
3268 If you take all four, I'll even throw you a bone. 1.0980 0.03271 102 93 8 1
3269 Hey buddy! That hood looks kinda empty! 1.0980 0.03555 102 94 6 2
3270 Genuine Rolex! 1.0978 0.03477 92 84 7 1
3271 This coat lets you to your date that you are both a dog and a cat person. 1.0978 0.03477 92 84 7 1
3272 Care for a paw wow? 1.0978 0.03114 92 83 9 0
3273 Fo one hundred bucks -Which one is BIDEN ? And stop looking at my fly ! 1.0976 0.03297 82 74 8 0
3274 We can't all wait for the rainy days. 1.0976 0.03726 82 75 6 1
3275 Wanna grab some eyeballs?? 1.0976 0.03297 82 74 8 0
3276 I just joined a quilting bee! 1.0976 0.03726 82 75 6 1
3277 They make great pets, but they do go wild when its raining! 1.0976 0.04110 82 76 4 2
3278 Voila, my latest no-judgement line for the fashion-challenged. 1.0976 0.03726 82 75 6 1
3279 Pussy or bitch? 1.0976 0.03726 82 75 6 1
3280 This may be out of pocket.. 1.0976 0.03297 82 74 8 0
3281 You'll still need to pay to get her back. 1.0971 0.03522 103 95 6 2
3282 I lost track of time. 1.0971 0.02932 103 93 10 0
3283 Psst! Cure for the drought. 1.0971 0.03522 103 95 6 2
3284 Buy all of them and I will throw in the dog carrier! 1.0971 0.03240 103 94 8 1
3285 These can fit in that little pot you're after! 1.0971 0.03522 103 95 6 2
3286 Can I interest you in my latest canine and feline collection? 1.0971 0.02932 103 93 10 0
3287 If you don't like any of these, I've got more in the van. 1.0971 0.02932 103 93 10 0
3288 Sorry, my generation actually likes exposed brick. 1.0968 0.03765 93 86 5 2
3289 I got Purrsians, Beegals, Simonese, anything you want. 1.0968 0.03765 93 86 5 2
3290 That’s right I got two-furs, BOc/GOd all week… 1.0968 0.03441 93 85 7 1
3291 Ignore the giant ufo casting a big shadow over this building right now and look at this shit 1.0968 0.03441 93 85 7 1
3292 Black Barket pet for the family? 1.0964 0.03259 83 75 8 0
3293 I guarantee that they are self-boarding and vet fee, poop, and urine free. 1.0964 0.03682 83 76 6 1
3294 You wanna good body high, try these puppies. 1.0964 0.04062 83 77 4 2
3295 They look cute and need no care and are stuffed with the finest newspaper. 1.0964 0.03259 83 75 8 0
3296 You look like a gentleman who is in touch with his feeling and does not care if his house gets distroyed. 1.0964 0.03682 83 76 6 1
3297 They all come with their ‘Lost Pet’ post so you can return them to their owners and play the hero 1.0964 0.03682 83 76 6 1
3298 So you “I got the top breed the girls go wild for… yeah, the French Balldog. 1.0962 0.03489 104 96 6 2
3299 50 bucks. No leashes attached. 1.0962 0.03210 104 95 8 1
3300 I’ve got dachshund puppies in the back too if these don’t get you high enough. 1.0957 0.03051 94 85 9 0
3301 I rescued them from the pet store. 1.0957 0.03726 94 87 5 2
3302 Hey, friend! I heard you was lookin' for some young pussy! 1.0957 0.03405 94 86 7 1
3303 Duty-Free! 1.0957 0.03726 94 87 5 2
3304 The perfect pet---freeze dried to stay adorable and not puke on your bed in the middle of the night 1.0957 0.03726 94 87 5 2
3305 If you buy one of these, it IS a rescue; don’t make me have to kill them all. 1.0957 0.03405 94 86 7 1
3306 I'll pay YOU to take them-I spend most of my waking hours scratching certain parts of my anatomy. 1.0952 0.03640 84 77 6 1
3307 Wanna add to your collection? 1.0952 0.03222 84 76 8 0
3308 These ain’t no knockoffs. These babies are purebreds. 1.0952 0.03640 84 77 6 1
3309 Buy three and you get your fourth pet free. 1.0952 0.02878 105 95 10 0
3310 See there not in a Bag any more. 1.0952 0.02878 105 95 10 0
3311 Would you like an emotional support animal instead? They have no side effects and are completely legal. 1.0952 0.02878 105 95 10 0
3312 Doses. Doses. Hey, buddy, I got your serotonin right here. 1.0952 0.04357 84 79 2 3
3313 Get your animal slippers, come get your animal slippers. 1.0952 0.03222 84 76 8 0
3314 All purebred I swear, just check their tags 1.0947 0.03021 95 86 9 0
3315 These are cheaper because they're pittens and kuppies. 1.0947 0.03371 95 87 7 1
3316 Guarenteed never owned by a pandemic creep. 1.0947 0.03371 95 87 7 1
3317 Please buy one. They're a weight on my conscience. 1.0947 0.03688 95 88 5 2
3318 Well, as long as they weren't raised in puppy/kitten mills. 1.0947 0.03021 95 86 9 0
3319 This litter fell off a truck. 1.0947 0.03371 95 87 7 1
3320 Pets for sale. 1.0947 0.03021 95 86 9 0
3321 Not a runt in the bunch. 1.0947 0.03688 95 88 5 2
3322 Guaranteed abandoned by Millennials after the pandemic ended 1.0946 0.03425 74 67 7 0
3323 Look quickly! The SPCA is very concerned about this sad and ignorant attempt at humour. 1.0946 0.03425 74 67 7 0
3324 I swear they aren't alley cats. 1.0943 0.03425 106 98 6 2
3325 As seen on my Facebook page! 1.0943 0.03152 106 97 8 1
3326 It's a steal, Mister ! Buy one get none free ! 1.0943 0.02853 106 96 10 0
3327 I figure if Pet Rocks were such a craze... 1.0941 0.03969 85 79 4 2
3328 Well, at least you won't have gotten them at a pet store. 1.0941 0.03599 85 78 6 1
3329 Psst! Looky here! I picked ‘em up cheap when it was raining. 1.0941 0.03599 85 78 6 1
3330 They all have been wormed and spayed. 1.0941 0.03599 85 78 6 1
3331 You wanna buy a watchdog? Or maybe a hep cat? 1.0941 0.03599 85 78 6 1
3332 You can't call the police. These are AI fakes. 1.0941 0.03599 85 78 6 1
3333 You’re not the first customer I’ve confused with my ‘no tick guarantee’ 1.0941 0.03969 85 79 4 2
3334 I can make you a deal on the whole kitten kaboodle 1.0941 0.03186 85 77 8 0
3335 This is allowed on the subway. 1.0938 0.02991 96 87 9 0
3336 It makes drying dishes easier than walking your pets. 1.0938 0.03337 96 88 7 1
3337 Hey buddy! For just $10.00, these puppets will do anything you want. 1.0938 0.02991 96 87 9 0
3338 Litter box training and/or house breaking will cost ya extra. 1.0938 0.03651 96 89 5 2
3339 Hey,kid,you know with climate change it no longer rains cats and dogs,but that don't mean you can't find 'em if you know where to look. 1.0938 0.02991 96 87 9 0
3340 Hey, mista, wanna pet a pet? 1.0938 0.02991 96 87 9 0
3341 GLBQ, your choice. 1.0938 0.03337 96 88 7 1
3342 You can buy them or rent them for the week. 1.0930 0.03151 86 78 8 0
3343 I had to pivot Nobody uses tailors any more Pet sitting forget about it I never been so busy. 1.0928 0.02961 97 88 9 0
3344 Psst... wanna great deal on a genuine registered truffle cat or dog? 1.0928 0.03304 97 89 7 1
3345 When it rains heavily I just turn my raincoat inside out. 1.0928 0.02961 97 88 9 0
3346 And each one ‘house-broken’ at no extra cost! Wadda ya say my man? 1.0928 0.03304 97 89 7 1
3347 Yes, the cats are more expensive. Notwithstanding that they crap in your house, if a cat can kill over a hundred birds a year AND bring every one of ‘em to your front door, that productivity outweighs any dog. Think feather collection. 1.0928 0.02961 97 88 9 0
3348 It can definitely be annoying when they start squirming! 1.0928 0.03304 97 89 7 1
3349 ...and this little guy's father won a best-of-breed at last year's American Kennel Club competition. 1.0928 0.03304 97 89 7 1
3350 Was it a magic show or an animal show? 1.0928 0.03304 97 89 7 1
3351 Trust me, this one will make you happier than any other drug 1.0928 0.03614 97 90 5 2
3352 I did say you would be getting the finest furs. 1.0921 0.03339 76 69 7 0
3353 I thought you enjoyed your purchase during the lockdown so I had to show you more varieties now you work from home with zero social interaction and no intention of establishing one. 1.0921 0.03339 76 69 7 0
3354 I didn't find your wife, but who needs her when you have these adorable little things? 1.0920 0.03116 87 79 8 0
3355 Hey pal, can I interest you in a pocket companion? No one need know why you're smiling. 1.0920 0.03519 87 80 6 1
3356 And each of 'em's a gen-yoo-wine clone of a famous celebrity's pet 1.0920 0.03116 87 79 8 0
3357 They’re 100% Doodle. But for a third of what the breeders charge. 1.0920 0.03519 87 80 6 1
3358 Watches went out of style. 1.0920 0.03880 87 81 4 2
3359 Turns out it is a crime to be this cute. 1.0920 0.03519 87 80 6 1
3360 Oh, Indica is the cat’s name 1.0920 0.03519 87 80 6 1
3361 What's your preference??Kitty or Doggie both fur balls are protectors both provide companionship but only ONE can offer that discrete quality of silence when in the company of others speech replicates exaggerated claims of accomplishments-conquests 1.0920 0.03880 87 81 4 2
3362 I thought you said exotic animals. 1.0918 0.03271 98 90 7 1
3363 Son, look at these cute pussies I have (sic) 1.0918 0.03271 98 90 7 1
3364 Trust me,everyone will think it’s real fur. 1.0918 0.02932 98 89 9 0
3365 The only reason you have this opportunity is I need the money for a bus ticket home.. First year Veterinary costs are Free.. 1.0918 0.02932 98 89 9 0
3366 What can I tell you? We lost our funding at the shelter. How many do you want? 1.0918 0.03271 98 90 7 1
3367 Each comes with a counterfeit collar and knockoff chew toy. 1.0917 0.03068 109 100 8 1
3368 See...? And I don't have to clean after them. 1.0909 0.03480 88 81 6 1
3369 THESE ARE UNVAXXED! 1.0909 0.03240 99 91 7 1
3370 Warm and fuzzy something for the missus? $100 with no adoption fees! 1.0909 0.03082 88 80 8 0
3371 And I can also offer you matching teacups. 1.0909 0.03480 88 81 6 1
3372 I got a few more if you wanna follow me to my van. 1.0909 0.03240 99 91 7 1
3373 Guaranteed to bring heavy rain 1.0909 0.02904 99 90 9 0
3374 This is the good stuff. 100% purebred, trust me, you're not gonna find anything better on these streets 1.0909 0.03240 99 91 7 1
3375 True love? 1.0909 0.03480 88 81 6 1
3376 Hypodermic!? I thought you said hypoallergenic! 1.0909 0.03082 88 80 8 0
3377 See, it’s rain-coating cats and dogs! 1.0909 0.03480 88 81 6 1
3378 They make great pockpet warmers. 1.0909 0.03480 88 81 6 1
3379 I asked for drugs, not dogs 1.0909 0.03082 88 80 8 0
3380 Wanna watch? 1.0909 0.03480 88 81 6 1
3381 Told you I wasn’t kitten! 1.0909 0.03780 77 71 5 1
3382 Yep, sure to cure any anxiety, and they’re already shopping cart trained. 1.0900 0.03208 100 92 7 1
3383 The Republican will cost you. 1.0900 0.03208 100 92 7 1
3384 For a song, you can have a cute pup or puss to take on those late-night strolls." 1.0900 0.02876 100 91 9 0
3385 My wife is on the next corner selling handbags for these and whatever you want. 1.0900 0.03208 100 92 7 1
3386 You wanna cat-ch a deal that’s pup-ousterously good!? 1.0900 0.03208 100 92 7 1
3387 Guaranteed to be 100% pure bred... 1.0899 0.03442 89 82 6 1
3388 Cheap. 1.0899 0.03049 89 81 8 0
3389 'Hey relax don't worry...another guy saw willies and wonkas...it will wear off in a week' 1.0899 0.03442 89 82 6 1
3390 You will NOT believe what I found in the rain yesterday 1.0891 0.02849 101 92 9 0
3391 I snuggled these goods from all the way across the border! 1.0891 0.03475 101 94 5 2
3392 Got every color, every breed, everything you need. The cool kids call it…Rainbow pet-n-all… 1.0891 0.02849 101 92 9 0
3393 It's the newest thing - a pop-up pet store! 1.0889 0.03405 90 83 6 1
3394 They better not be cut with empawlming fluid. 1.0889 0.03017 90 82 8 0
3395 They're just like real ones, except you can hear the ticks. 1.0889 0.03017 90 82 8 0
3396 Choose one quick. The cops are coming ! 1.0886 0.03688 79 73 5 1
3397 No, actually, they're pinatas. Hand-sewn. We're aiming toward a more mindful kindness to animals while discouraging sugar consumption." 1.0886 0.03218 79 72 7 0
3398 I believe becoming an animal foster earns one "Heaven Points", and who can't use more of those 1.0886 0.03218 79 72 7 0
3399 You have my word: This shit is pure marijuana. 1.0886 0.03688 79 73 5 1
3400 No need to doubt the quality....I'm a reputable dealer—sure it costs you a few bucks more. But look what your getting. Fully trained and with names....cats respond to Patek and dogs respond to Rolex. 1.0885 0.02684 113 103 10 0
3401 Haha, you can’t spell COAT without C-A-T :) That’s why I put these in my COAT, because as I said, you can’t spell COAT EITHOUT CAT! 1.0885 0.02684 113 103 10 0
3402 Move it along Pops, this is a "No Litter" zone! 1.0879 0.03369 91 84 6 1
3403 This coast was definitely the best find at Goodwill yesterday! 1.0879 0.02985 91 83 8 0
3404 No, not raining here, but may I rein you in, respectively, sir? 1.0879 0.02985 91 83 8 0
3405 Better than an alarm clock, pal. No snooze button on these cats, and the dogs are more efficient, and cheaper, than a security system. No installation work required! 1.0879 0.02985 91 83 8 0
3406 Because no one wears a watch anymore. But puppies and kitty cats? Hot commodities, baby. Any day of da week. 1.0879 0.03714 91 85 4 2
3407 Psst. Want some litter? 1.0879 0.02985 91 83 8 0
3408 No leash required! 1.0879 0.02985 91 83 8 0
3409 Psssst! Wanna buy a true thoroughbred? 1.0875 0.03179 80 73 7 0
3410 Yes, I’m the same guy who sold you a Rolex last week. 1.0875 0.03179 80 73 7 0
3411 Why would I tell you they're velociraptors if they're not the real deal? 1.0875 0.03643 80 74 5 1
3412 Hey Pal, your your 10 bucks will support my inhumane society. 1.0874 0.03118 103 95 7 1
3413 Hey bud, howsabout reigning cats & dogs instead of umbrellas? 1.0870 0.02954 92 84 8 0
3414 Today's special...buy three and get one FREE! 1.0870 0.03334 92 85 6 1
3415 They aren’t watches, but they will let you know when it’s play time! 1.0870 0.03334 92 85 6 1
3416 Hey buddy, want a deal, well dog gone it, these are the cat's meow 1.0870 0.03334 92 85 6 1
3417 Let me introduce you! Boo-boo, Boo-bah, Baby-boo, and Charlie. Aren’t they adorable? 1.0870 0.02954 92 84 8 0
3418 Buy now, pay later 1.0870 0.02954 92 84 8 0
3419 One of these things is nit like the other.... 1.0865 0.03089 104 96 7 1
3420 Soooo,! Which one of these do you want to rescue? Because tomorrow were drowning this lot ! 1.0865 0.03089 104 96 7 1
3421 No shipping and handling, no sales tax, no waiting on Amazon delivery, cash and carry today only! 1.0865 0.02770 104 95 9 0
3422 Rescued animals are the best. 1.0865 0.03089 104 96 7 1
3423 For a fair offer, you can have the whole family...... 1.0864 0.03141 81 74 7 0
3424 Furry trenchcoat for sale. 1.0864 0.03599 81 75 5 1
3425 I'll take the puppy upper right. Thanks! 1.0860 0.03299 93 86 6 1
3426 They´re from the best rain of the year. 1.0860 0.02923 93 85 8 0
3427 …and they’ve all been vaccinated. 1.0860 0.02923 93 85 8 0
3428 These have been approved by AI. 1.0860 0.03636 93 87 4 2
3429 Do you have any hypoallergenic options? 1.0860 0.03299 93 86 6 1
3430 You mentioned they would lick my face every morning. 1.0860 0.03299 93 86 6 1
3431 They let me off with a warning the last time I flashed my kitties. 1.0860 0.03299 93 86 6 1
3432 crystal kitty? foggy doggy?' unleashed bark shark? natural cat ? 1.0857 0.03061 105 97 7 1
3433 If you want the designer stuff, I sell them by the pound 1.0857 0.03061 105 97 7 1
3434 Love this sweet and unconditional should be illegal. 1.0854 0.03557 82 76 5 1
3435 I've got hot dogs and hot cool cats. 1.0851 0.03598 94 88 4 2
3436 I don't care what you do with them in the privacy of your home. 1.0851 0.03265 94 87 6 1
3437 Honestly. It wasn't me. It was my pets. 1.0851 0.03265 94 87 6 1
3438 Taxidermy, young man! 1.0851 0.02894 94 86 8 0
3439 See, what I gots here is 2 cats and 2 dogs. It's a statement about the American people and how Capitalism will eventually-" "I don't care Tony, I'm just here for my husband's order of Blue Dream. 1.0851 0.03265 94 87 6 1
3440 Guaranteed, Original Dead Cat Rack, would I lie 1.0843 0.03069 83 76 7 0
3441 No, but they'll help you get through withdrawal" 1.0843 0.03069 83 76 7 0
3442 You go to school, see? You become a weather forecaster, y'unnerstan? 1.0843 0.03515 83 77 5 1
3443 Their cheaper by the litter. 1.0843 0.03069 83 76 7 0
3444 I don't think they're real." "They're real cute though. 1.0843 0.03515 83 77 5 1
3445 They are all up to date on their vaccines except Fred there. 1.0843 0.03515 83 77 5 1
3446 The new sweet stuff on the market 1.0843 0.03515 83 77 5 1
3447 It's just great to find another stuffed animal enthusiast! 1.0842 0.03232 95 88 6 1
3448 I got some real $@&! in here. 1.0842 0.03232 95 88 6 1
3449 Oh ho ho, I see you like what you see. Eh? How about it? Ehh? 1.0842 0.02864 95 87 8 0
3450 You, woke me up for this ? 1.0833 0.02836 96 88 8 0
3451 You can't miss with one of these. The latest. Cuddly, Smart, Bot-y trained, if you get me. She'll never know .. . 1.0833 0.02836 96 88 8 0
3452 That’s the beauty of it. They’re actually fentanyl chewies shaped like small pets! Sick, eh? Harry Benner, Chevy Chase 1.0833 0.03474 84 78 5 1
3453 None of them have ever been outside. 1.0833 0.02672 108 99 9 0
3454 I got rabbits and hamsters, too. 1.0833 0.03474 84 78 5 1
3455 Well sure, that's how I lure you over here -- but hey, each one of these little fellas is looking for their forever home... 1.0833 0.03865 84 79 3 2
3456 And because you're such a good customer we're going to give you two pocket pets for the price of one. Just pay separate handling fees. 1.0833 0.02836 96 88 8 0
3457 I used to make a living selling rain, but things got tougher when I moved to the big city.” 1.0833 0.03034 84 77 7 0
3458 50 cents a cat, 60 cents a dog! 1.0833 0.03474 84 78 5 1
3459 How much is that doggie/kitty in the pocket? 1.0833 0.03525 96 90 4 2
3460 Hands jobs is now around the corner. I just sell hand puppets. 1.0825 0.03167 97 90 6 1
3461 The perfect coat for when it's raining cats and dogs! 1.0825 0.02808 97 89 8 0
3462 I think Ringo was a good enough drummer. 1.0824 0.02999 85 78 7 0
3463 These are real beeniebabies I swear 1.0824 0.03435 85 79 5 1
3464 Each one has memorized the entire contents of a banned book. 1.0824 0.02999 85 78 7 0
3465 I’ve been watching cats lately. . 1.0824 0.03435 85 79 5 1
3466 No, the warranty doesn't cover damage to carpets or furniture, but adorability is guaranteed for up to six months! 1.0824 0.03435 85 79 5 1
3467 Works on the ladies, if ya get my drift... 1.0824 0.02999 85 78 7 0
3468 There's a lot more where they came from. Remember...adopt, don't shop! 1.0822 0.03237 73 67 6 0
3469 Gucci"s and Miu Miu's ? I thought you said Poochies and Meow Meows! 1.0816 0.02780 98 90 8 0
3470 The latest drop, already authenticated. 1.0816 0.03136 98 91 6 1
3471 Best deal ever on the table 1.0816 0.03136 98 91 6 1
3472 Direct import from China. AI- driven support animals. Special price. Today only. 1.0814 0.03396 86 80 5 1
3473 They checked you out online. You passed! 1.0814 0.02966 86 79 7 0
3474 Either buy a dog or a cat. Or, you listen to my bullshit. 1.0814 0.03777 86 81 3 2
3475 Yes they are all rescue animals ………from me 1.0814 0.02966 86 79 7 0
3476 Hand puppets. Cute as a button and no cleanup. 1.0814 0.03396 86 80 5 1
3477 Trust me, they’re house broken. 1.0814 0.02966 86 79 7 0
3478 Looked in the box this morning and they were all alive 1.0814 0.03396 86 80 5 1
3479 I can give you a much better price than adoption centers, 1.0814 0.02966 86 79 7 0
3480 Epstein never needed any tickets to the peep show 1.0814 0.03396 86 80 5 1
3481 Get ‘em while they’re not too hot in here global warming’s a real bitch this summer 1.0814 0.02966 86 79 7 0
3482 The first guy says, Psst! Hey Buddy…Can I interest you in a Cloned pet? From 100% Nuclear DNA they even glow in the dark. Cloned them myself from PCR kits and eggs dating back to the 80’s. The patron asks, Do you have any Magic Lamps with a Genie still inside? First guy says, you don’t like what you see I have a pocket full of mice for sale. Just don’t mind the Human ear growing on its back. All out of Magic Lamps, how do think I got all this stuff? 1.0814 0.03777 86 81 3 2
3483 And look how much they love you! 1.0811 0.02900 111 103 7 1
3484 These purr-fect fur babies are looking quite fetching! No subwoofers or cattitude here. Don't pass up this oppawtunity! 1.0811 0.03195 74 68 6 0
3485 I have Ranger, Yankee, Knick, and Jet. 1.0808 0.02753 99 91 8 0
3486 And they're raincoat-broken! 1.0805 0.03358 87 81 5 1
3487 IM SURE YOU CAN SEE THE FAMILY RESEMBLANCE 1.0805 0.03358 87 81 5 1
3488 Look, you just put 'em in a bag, shave off all the hair, toss'em in the microwave, and POOF instant chicken parm. 1.0805 0.02933 87 80 7 0
3489 It's my latest display. I call it " Dog posse". Hey , get in on the ground floor. An investment!! 1.0800 0.03387 100 94 4 2
3490 '...This is a genius loophole! The Kangaroo's patent is for ONE pocket--we'll make a fortune!' 1.0800 0.03075 100 93 6 1
3491 Their cuteness is contageous" 1.0795 0.03321 88 82 5 1
3492 … And for another five dollars I can also get you a rabbit 1.0795 0.02901 88 81 7 0
3493 Imagine what one of these puppies will fetch ya! 1.0795 0.02901 88 81 7 0
3494 Well it's one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, now go, cat, go! 1.0795 0.02901 88 81 7 0
3495 You never heard the expression, "it's raincoat cats and dogs"? 1.0792 0.03045 101 94 6 1
3496 No need to go through that lengthy adoption process and disclose your finances. These authentic, top-of-the-line kittens and puppies are ready for adoption! 1.0792 0.03045 101 94 6 1
3497 I got some Westminster rescues... 1.0792 0.03045 101 94 6 1
3498 They're good to scare dogs with. 1.0787 0.03285 89 83 5 1
3499 I "purr-fur" a pet store but I will take a peek at the pups. 1.0787 0.03285 89 83 5 1
3500 It is a one-of-a-kind litter! 1.0787 0.02870 89 82 7 0
3501 Yeah, it's a pretty nice jacket. 1.0787 0.02870 89 82 7 0
3502 Authentic Swiss Mountain Dogs and Cats. Water resistant, especially the cats. 1.0787 0.02870 89 82 7 0
3503 I'll show you the cat's meow. 1.0783 0.02515 115 106 9 0
3504 Why yes they are for sale. A new singing group called "Reigning Cats & Dogs". How much? For you? $300.00 and I'll throw in the raincoat. 1.0779 0.03588 77 72 4 1
3505 Elizabeth Warren banned your pet store, huh? Aw, shucks. But sure, I can get you into anyone of these purebred cuties for a price. 1.0779 0.03075 77 71 6 0
3506 Some are full grown. Some are not. 1.0779 0.03075 77 71 6 0
3507 No counterfeits ... Guaranteed! 1.0779 0.03075 77 71 6 0
3508 I can make you a terrific cashdeal on any one of these pedigree’ 1.0779 0.03588 77 72 4 1
3509 Once you've sniffed one, you'll want all four! 1.0779 0.03075 77 71 6 0
3510 And each comes with a real diamond collar. 1.0778 0.02839 90 83 7 0
3511 I got the top of feline goods - whatever you need! 1.0778 0.02839 90 83 7 0
3512 These puppies are to die for! 1.0778 0.02839 90 83 7 0
3513 They come with a breeder’s warranty. 1.0778 0.02839 90 83 7 0
3514 And then I finally figured out why the fit was a little off… 1.0778 0.03613 90 85 3 2
3515 Pirated pups and contraband kitties. Take your pick to get your Papas Party fix. 1.0777 0.02650 103 95 8 0
3516 Cats, dogs, anything that you need to have a good time. 1.0777 0.02650 103 95 8 0
3517 The ultimate protection, recommended by nine of every ten gangsters, back-alley cuddles, no ID, only belly rubs required!" 1.0769 0.02809 91 84 7 0
3518 Nope, but I’ve got drooly jewelry 1.0769 0.03037 78 72 6 0
3519 Kill ‘‘em with kindness 1.0762 0.02602 105 97 8 0
3520 I also got a gerbil! 1.0762 0.02602 105 97 8 0
3521 Just bake and serve. 1.0761 0.03180 92 86 5 1
3522 Feeling down, bud? You look like you could use a pick-me-up and I’ve got just the thing… 1.0761 0.03180 92 86 5 1
3523 No officer sir. These are just wind up toys you see? Run, Susan! Get the car! 1.0759 0.03499 79 74 4 1
3524 each has been smuggled in from abroad and carries an obscure and incurable disease. 1.0759 0.03936 79 75 2 2
3525 Easy to carry and at a bargain price!” 1.0753 0.03499 93 88 3 2
3526 No wind up required. 1.0753 0.02751 93 86 7 0
3527 Hey buddy these are pure breeds” 1.0753 0.02751 93 86 7 0
3528 Yeah, bud, I've successfully bred dogs to cats. I call em dats. Or if you want, cogs. Either way the perfect pet. Best of both the feline and the canine worlds. These gems here bark, purr, fetch, roll over, and use the litter box. 1.0750 0.03456 80 75 4 1
3529 I'll give ya' two for the price of a runt. 1.0750 0.02963 80 74 6 0
3530 These puppets have many uses. .In a pinch they can even be an entree into back alley social life! 1.0750 0.02963 80 74 6 0
3531 Brand new and the real thing...guaranteed! 1.0750 0.02963 80 74 6 0
3532 They taste great with some fava beans. 1.0750 0.03456 80 75 4 1
3533 I'm having a BOGO today 1.0750 0.02963 80 74 6 0
3534 Of course, they're pedigreed! 1.0750 0.02963 80 74 6 0
3535 I'll see what my tailor can do with a hoodie.... 1.0745 0.03114 94 88 5 1
3536 You begged for young pussy. 1.0745 0.03462 94 89 3 2
3537 Each of them comes with an authentic rhinestone collar! 1.0745 0.02722 94 87 7 0
3538 They're Hublot watchdogs, a steal at ten thou apeice. 1.0744 0.02395 121 112 9 0
3539 Rehome nearly any breed you may need. 1.0741 0.03415 81 76 4 1
3540 Remember, you can’t tell anyone about this furry operation 1.0737 0.02695 95 88 7 0
3541 David Remnick '81, I still know what you did last summer and I can still smell your cunt! 1.0737 0.02695 95 88 7 0
3542 Want some pussy or do you prefer doggie style? 1.0737 0.03082 95 89 5 1
3543 This little guy will make an excellent watch. 1.0737 0.02695 95 88 7 0
3544 They're pocket pet ice packs; how else could I wear this coat in this heat. Carry your own beer into the stadium---cuz you say "It's my emotional support animal." 1.0732 0.02894 82 76 6 0
3545 ....and these are the latest AI generated furry pals.... 1.0729 0.03051 96 90 5 1
3546 I found these good boys during last night’s storm 1.0729 0.02668 96 89 7 0
3547 We're all out of 8s. Can I interest you in some strays? 1.0729 0.02668 96 89 7 0
3548 It’s reigning cats and dogs! 1.0729 0.03051 96 90 5 1
3549 A little pussy? A little bitch? 1.0723 0.03334 83 78 4 1
3550 It's designed for when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.0723 0.03334 83 78 4 1
3551 For the kittens, sure, but I don't think there even is a dogGPT. 1.0723 0.02860 83 77 6 0
3552 I got your pure breeds for you, straight from the source and illegal in all 50 states 1.0723 0.02860 83 77 6 0
3553 But Bobby, check out the lining on this coat?! How could I not?? 1.0723 0.02860 83 77 6 0
3554 Do you interest in some happiness? 1.0722 0.02641 97 90 7 0
3555 Take your pick. They are all stuffed with stuff. 1.0714 0.03295 84 79 4 1
3556 And if you're interested in a birds, I have a few chickadees in my back pocket. 1.0714 0.02827 84 78 6 0
3557 I can give you the dogs, but you ask for the other thing, you have to go around the corner and pay. 1.0714 0.03295 84 79 4 1
3558 Sony guts…. 1.0707 0.02589 99 92 7 0
3559 Hot?!? No: training for NYC apartment life! FREE OF CHARGE! 1.0707 0.02961 99 93 5 1
3560 Hey, bud ya want a kitten? 1.0706 0.02795 85 79 6 0
3561 These may appear to be little angels, but they are truly ocelots and wild dogs. 1.0706 0.03257 85 80 4 1
3562 With one of these, say goodbye to leashes 1.0700 0.02932 100 94 5 1
3563 Labradoodles will cost ya' extra. 1.0698 0.02763 86 80 6 0
3564 These come with no COLLAR ID’s 1.0698 0.03220 86 81 4 1
3565 And if you want dirty dogs I’ve got some at my place. 1.0698 0.03220 86 81 4 1
3566 kedi,köpek ve palto.. 1.0698 0.02763 86 80 6 0
3567 They’re better than house trained . . . and I’ll even throw in the fleas for free. 1.0698 0.02763 86 80 6 0
3568 Puppy omm meow meow 1.0698 0.03220 86 81 4 1
3569 republican democrat you choose the'll do what ever you say 1.0698 0.03220 86 81 4 1
3570 If you like these I can also get you rainbows and unicorns that fell off the truck . 1.0698 0.02763 86 80 6 0
3571 NY apartment Pin Ups 1.0698 0.02763 86 80 6 0
3572 🎶They called it puppy love, But I love kitties too🎶 1.0698 0.02763 86 80 6 0
3573 They're gonna make you a hit on the 'Gram! 1.0698 0.02763 86 80 6 0
3574 Get Your 14 Karat Gold Diamond Cats and Dogs--One Dollar. 1.0693 0.02540 101 94 7 0
3575 It was raining cats and dogs, so I rescued the kittens and pups in this neat slicker. 1.0693 0.02904 101 95 5 1
3576 These are rare vintage puppies and kittens. 1.0690 0.02732 87 81 6 0
3577 I got the idea from "The Walking Dead." Next week, a tiger! 1.0690 0.03184 87 82 4 1
3578 You get four for the price of one. But their Moms have put out APB's on all of them! 1.0690 0.02732 87 81 6 0
3579 Guaranteed never to turn into dogs and cats. 1.0690 0.03184 87 82 4 1
3580 You can really feel the quality of the pet outfits on these rats. 1.0690 0.02732 87 81 6 0
3581 Pick-a-pet-any-pet! 1.0690 0.03184 87 82 4 1
3582 I got that good stuff 1.0686 0.02876 102 96 5 1
3583 Just $2 each. Take it to the Peking Rescue Restaurant around the corner and get a fabulous meal for only $10 more. 1.0682 0.03149 88 83 4 1
3584 Well, if not dangerous drugs, could you use any cute golf club covers? 1.0682 0.03149 88 83 4 1
3585 I’m saving them for the grandchildren! 1.0682 0.03149 88 83 4 1
3586 For you,buddy, it's a Bogo. 1.0682 0.02702 88 82 6 0
3587 …and they all come from Cat Alley… 9th, 52nd, 8th, and 51st… 1.0682 0.03149 88 83 4 1
3588 The adoption paperwork is minimal. 1.0682 0.02702 88 82 6 0
3589 Gotta real deal for ya...all brand new, one of a kind, direct from the factory! 1.0674 0.02673 89 83 6 0
3590 Yes, of course. They're all housebroken. 1.0674 0.03500 89 85 2 2
3591 It’s memes for life, buddy! 1.0674 0.03114 89 84 4 1
3592 No, I'm not selling this hat, but I think they sell them at Macy's. 1.0674 0.02673 89 83 6 0
3593 Make me an offer on this fur coat. 1.0674 0.03114 89 84 4 1
3594 Whaaatttt!!! You thought I was sellin watches or somethin!!! 1.0667 0.02644 90 84 6 0
3595 Hawt deal on unclaimed Covid boredom pets ! 1.0667 0.02644 90 84 6 0
3596 You will not need the set the alarm every with one of these. 1.0667 0.02644 90 84 6 0
3597 Is this too fur-mal? 1.0667 0.02644 90 84 6 0
3598 These are the genuine article. Fido. Tiger. Catek Philippe. 1.0667 0.03080 90 85 4 1
3599 Everyone knows, it's not the Rolex that makes the watch collection, it's the cats and dogs that round it out 1.0659 0.03047 91 86 4 1
3600 Sorry, I’m looking for a goldfish. 1.0659 0.02616 91 85 6 0
3601 Today only...Pocket Pets..along with a free soup recipe. 1.0659 0.02616 91 85 6 0
3602 Every kid wants one. 1.0658 0.02863 76 71 5 0
3603 Be the only one on your block to own a coat dog! 1.0658 0.02863 76 71 5 0
3604 https://www.liberation.fr/resizer/nSL2Z7T-XWNB3- 1.0654 0.02402 107 100 7 0
3605 Unfucked will set you back a little more. 1.0652 0.02588 92 86 6 0
3606 But.. Wait!...There's more...built in poop bags! N no more v bending over to clean up after your pets. 1.0652 0.03388 92 88 2 2
3607 They were so tasty I overate! 1.0652 0.03015 92 87 4 1
3608 They're more faithful than porn stars. 1.0652 0.02588 92 86 6 0
3609 Hey Buddy, wanna buy CatDog? 1.0652 0.02588 92 86 6 0
3610 We have " escort accompanied shipping " if you are from another state. Just a small extra fee! 1.0649 0.02827 77 72 5 0
3611 Nothing up my sleeves, but I do have a nice rabbit if you’re interested 1.0649 0.02827 77 72 5 0
3612 Do you want a distraction even during your lunch break? Catnip comes with a cat. 1.0645 0.02561 93 87 6 0
3613 Boy,you think you're a pervert?! Check these out! 1.0641 0.02791 78 73 5 0
3614 Of course they come with a guarantee. 1.0641 0.02791 78 73 5 0
3615 Psst, Bud: Wanta buy a porn pet? 1.0641 0.03801 78 75 1 2
3616 Let’s just say it fell off the ol’ schnoodle truck. 1.0633 0.02757 79 74 5 0
3617 I can get you a hybrid, too... 1.0625 0.02723 80 75 5 0
3618 These babes are the real deal, not some of those cheap fake mutts. 1.0625 0.02723 80 75 5 0
3619 Each one has a story to tell 1.0625 0.03253 80 76 3 1
3620 Late tonight only, I have the purr-fect o'puportunity fur sale. 1.0625 0.02723 80 75 5 0
3621 The cat’s in the bag n so are the dogs till you stop flinging your bs 1.0619 0.02459 97 91 6 0
3622 Don’t buy these if you think they’ll fix you, I wouldn’t be selling them otherwise 1.0617 0.02691 81 76 5 0
3623 Landlords hate this one simple pet. 1.0617 0.02691 81 76 5 0
3624 No, but can I interest you in a pussycat? 1.0612 0.02834 98 93 4 1
3625 Hey!, This is my collection of preserved cats and dogs 1.0610 0.02659 82 77 5 0
3626 You can tell their genuine by the way the second hand sweeps instead of ticks." 1.0610 0.03175 82 78 3 1
3627 Gun’s and drugs may break your bones, but dogs and cats will never hurt you. 1.0610 0.02659 82 77 5 0
3628 You can skip those bothersome forms and no yard? No problem! 1.0606 0.02806 99 94 4 1
3629 I take my family everywhere with me!….wanna join? 1.0606 0.02806 99 94 4 1
3630 Mission accomplished. I found your pets! 1.0602 0.03137 83 79 3 1
3631 Test 1.0595 0.03533 84 81 1 2
3632 If you take a puppy you’re gonna need shoes. 1.0588 0.02567 85 80 5 0
3633 C'mon buddy, it's just small-time crime." 1.0588 0.03065 85 81 3 1
3634 They ain’t ‘ Puss N Boots ‘ but, the cats are good mousers !” R.L Russell chartairpilot@gmail.co 1.0588 0.03065 85 81 3 1
3635 /Users/gohome/Pictures/Photos Library.photoslibrary/originals/9/92FD8A62-F6F0-468E-9AB4-953914858CE2.jpeg I have a target on my Back 1.0583 0.02699 103 98 4 1
3636 I can show you a different way 1.0583 0.02319 103 97 6 0
3637 You can make it rain any day. 1.0583 0.02319 103 97 6 0
3638 I know where you can buy a REAL fur-lined coat for cheap! 1.0581 0.02538 86 81 5 0
3639 Pure bred. Really. 1.0575 0.02510 87 82 5 0
3640 I'll take what they're having. 1.0575 0.02995 87 83 3 1
3641 A small bundle from Third Avenue! 1.0575 0.02510 87 82 5 0
3642 Can I interest you in a puppy or kitten fresh from the puppy mill. On special this week,buy one and get the other three for free. 1.0571 0.03457 70 67 2 1
3643 I love my pussy...and Fido too 1.0566 0.02623 106 101 4 1
3644 Literally, the hair of the dog. 1.0562 0.02929 89 85 3 1
3645 funny you should ask. i used to flash professionally-dressed women and school kids and anybody, really, but there’s no money in it. and when i started selling dogs and cats, i learned the hard way that dogs bite dick. and cats, cats really bite dick 1.0562 0.02929 89 85 3 1
3646 No heatwave for you when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.0556 0.02897 90 86 3 1
3647 A kitten or puppy in the pocket is worth more than in the hand. 1.0556 0.02718 72 68 4 0
3648 Pick your nose 1.0556 0.02428 90 85 5 0
3649 I'll take one of each! 1.0549 0.02402 91 86 5 0
3650 No vaccines---no lizard overlords. 1.0541 0.02647 74 70 4 0
3651 What did you think I meant when I said to check out my flash sale. 1.0538 0.02805 93 89 3 1
3652 I'm thinking about getting a patent for it - trenchcoat pocket animals. 1.0533 0.03229 75 72 2 1
3653 ih 1.0532 0.02775 94 90 3 1
3654 Psst...these fur balls tell time better than any watch. 1.0532 0.02327 94 89 5 0
3655 Wanna buy a cute adorable kitten or puppy? 1.0531 0.02119 113 107 6 0
3656 Hey Lefty, I like your puppies and kittens, but do you happen to have an “O” for sale? 1.0526 0.02578 76 72 4 0
3657 A little something for a rainy day? 1.0521 0.02280 96 91 5 0
3658 Any one of them will help improve your dating life. They are like magnets for attracting dates. 1.0519 0.02546 77 73 4 0
3659 I thought we were here to talk pets but you had me at "theropod breeding" and "mealtime." 1.0519 0.02546 77 73 4 0
3660 These toys say, ‘What climate change?’ Just keep them out of the heat. 1.0513 0.02514 78 74 4 0
3661 They are perfect for wife sitters. 1.0505 0.02212 99 94 5 0
3662 They are a lot tougher than they look. They will complete the job. 1.0500 0.02452 80 76 4 0
3663 Absolutely the BEST raincoat ever! 1.0500 0.03029 80 77 2 1
3664 I’ve got dawgs or kats. 1.0500 0.02190 100 95 5 0
3665 I've got Loyal,Sassy,Obedient,and Best Friend. 1.0500 0.02452 80 76 4 0
3666 Yes! The parts never shown on Tik-Tok. 1.0500 0.02452 80 76 4 0
3667 They jumped off the back of an SPCA truck. 1.0494 0.02422 81 77 4 0
3668 So you say business is drying up for you…well, let me make it rain, take a gander…. 1.0494 0.02422 81 77 4 0
3669 Hey man, if these aren't your bag, I know where I can get marionettes. 1.0485 0.02128 103 98 5 0
3670 They want to migrate to a more upscale hoodie. 1.0482 0.02365 83 79 4 0
3671 Hi stranger – are you looking to buy some Sunglasses? No? Cannabis? Coke? Hmm.. well then, maybe I can interest you in some kittens and puppies? 1.0476 0.02338 84 80 4 0
3672 I can you're excited. 1.0460 0.02258 87 83 4 0
3673 Relax! They're all gender-fluid! 1.0455 0.02757 88 85 2 1
3674 Monkey? No. I got cats and dogs. You want monkeys, go see Jane. 1.0449 0.02209 89 85 4 0
3675 So, Pussies have an -10% discount 1.0449 0.02209 89 85 4 0
3676 Primo! 1.0440 0.02161 91 87 4 0
3677 They dwell with Beauty as a slight - Beauty that must die a right 1.0440 0.02161 91 87 4 0
3678 not like the other black marketers 1.0429 0.03176 70 68 1 1
3679 Cheshire, collie, dachshund, alley cat. Your choice. 1.0423 0.02404 71 68 3 0
3680 Hey, you who are not dogmatic and who came here at a dogtrot. Do you want to see my new catalog from the cats and dogs category. It is catchy. 1.0421 0.02071 95 91 4 0
3681 Attack kittens or attack pups! Cheap! 1.0412 0.02029 97 93 4 0
3682 I love the pound. 1.0412 0.02503 97 94 2 1
3683 My MBA sure came in handy for panhandling. 1.0404 0.01989 99 95 4 0
3684 Originally, these were the bottom cat's pajamas 1.0370 0.02111 81 78 3 0
3685 15$ waterproof even raining cats and dogs. 1.0370 0.02111 81 78 3 0
3686 Welcome to my petting zoom call 1.0366 0.02086 82 79 3 0
3687 ‘I may appear to be a humble man but secretly my true identity is that of the ?? man 1.0366 0.02086 82 79 3 0
3688 Each sale comes with a free pocket watch! 1.0357 0.02037 84 81 3 0
3689 Pssst. I got some genuine pandemic pets. Whaddya like? 1.0263 0.01848 76 74 2 0
3690 Gucci surplus, pal. And weasel Halloween is right around the corner 1.0247 0.01735 81 79 2 0