Rank |
Caption |
Mean |
Precision |
Total votes |
"Unfunny" votes |
"Somewhat funny" votes |
"Funny" votes |
0 |
Are you very satisfied, somewhat satisfied, or not at all satisfied with your pool experience? |
1.7465 |
0.01814 |
1854 |
860 |
604 |
390 |
1 |
The invite said to wear a suit. |
1.7208 |
0.02022 |
1447 |
686 |
479 |
282 |
2 |
I’m usually naked in this dream. |
1.6994 |
0.01917 |
1700 |
863 |
485 |
352 |
3 |
It's either sync or swim. |
1.6767 |
0.01876 |
1701 |
873 |
505 |
323 |
4 |
Everyone on my call assumes it's a virtual background. |
1.6706 |
0.02730 |
762 |
383 |
247 |
132 |
5 |
They said I could work from anywhere if I followed the dress code. |
1.6676 |
0.01966 |
1450 |
727 |
478 |
245 |
6 |
Your application for a towel has been denied. |
1.6502 |
0.01752 |
1858 |
968 |
572 |
318 |
7 |
I'm taking swimming lessons online. |
1.6458 |
0.02793 |
768 |
414 |
212 |
142 |
8 |
I’m from the typing pool. |
1.6386 |
0.01842 |
1685 |
896 |
502 |
287 |
9 |
Do you mind? I'm in a meeting. |
1.6361 |
0.01727 |
1808 |
936 |
594 |
278 |
10 |
It started with a treadmill desk. |
1.6324 |
0.01661 |
1918 |
989 |
645 |
284 |
11 |
I AM the lifeguard. I'm just working remotely... |
1.6278 |
0.02430 |
1029 |
575 |
262 |
192 |
12 |
I'm taking an immersive writing course. |
1.6251 |
0.01790 |
1699 |
900 |
536 |
263 |
13 |
I’m working on my key stroke. |
1.6151 |
0.01437 |
2590 |
1383 |
821 |
386 |
14 |
Drowning is the leading cause of death among swimmers. Let me show you some of our life insurance options. |
1.6106 |
0.02186 |
1166 |
640 |
340 |
186 |
15 |
I found a hotspot. |
1.6105 |
0.01445 |
2583 |
1395 |
799 |
389 |
16 |
I prefer the keystroke. |
1.6075 |
0.01580 |
2135 |
1152 |
669 |
314 |
17 |
I’m phishing. |
1.6072 |
0.01695 |
1899 |
1037 |
571 |
291 |
18 |
In the afternoon I swim remotely. |
1.6053 |
0.01712 |
1946 |
1090 |
534 |
322 |
19 |
Believe it or not, Bob, this is 'work-life balance' for me |
1.6050 |
0.02562 |
833 |
457 |
248 |
128 |
20 |
I’m in submergers and acquisitions. |
1.6036 |
0.01910 |
1501 |
826 |
444 |
231 |
21 |
Did you just pee in my office? |
1.6009 |
0.01719 |
2027 |
1173 |
490 |
364 |
22 |
You think you're drowning? You should see my inbox... |
1.5951 |
0.01899 |
1467 |
805 |
451 |
211 |
23 |
And since the other swimmer viciously bumped you, you haven't been able to use your left arm, right? |
1.5942 |
0.01520 |
2383 |
1335 |
680 |
368 |
24 |
Marco. |
1.5929 |
0.01324 |
3704 |
2264 |
684 |
756 |
25 |
Can't talk now. I'm waist-deep at work. |
1.5887 |
0.01990 |
1274 |
691 |
416 |
167 |
26 |
I recommend full coverage. |
1.5875 |
0.01270 |
3280 |
1823 |
987 |
470 |
27 |
The last guy in this job went off the deep end. |
1.5837 |
0.01760 |
1744 |
985 |
500 |
259 |
28 |
That yellow is just my highlighter pen. |
1.5835 |
0.01979 |
1491 |
875 |
362 |
254 |
29 |
Yes, it's my first company picnic. Why do you ask? |
1.5785 |
0.01308 |
3426 |
2030 |
810 |
586 |
30 |
Business and pleasure. You? |
1.5779 |
0.01631 |
1912 |
1060 |
599 |
253 |
31 |
On a one-to-five scale, how likely would you be to purchase one of our beach towels? |
1.5774 |
0.01928 |
1382 |
770 |
426 |
186 |
32 |
These meetings were so much easier on the golf course… |
1.5750 |
0.01848 |
1454 |
801 |
470 |
183 |
33 |
We're on a work trip Keith, try to be more professional. |
1.5661 |
0.02045 |
1240 |
707 |
364 |
169 |
34 |
This meeting could have been an email. |
1.5654 |
0.01799 |
1636 |
943 |
461 |
232 |
35 |
Can you not splash? I’m on a Zoom call. |
1.5644 |
0.01877 |
1398 |
781 |
445 |
172 |
36 |
I couldn’t get into the office pool. |
1.5579 |
0.01759 |
1649 |
946 |
486 |
217 |
37 |
It's better than Starbucks because I never have to go to the restroom. |
1.5553 |
0.01917 |
1509 |
903 |
374 |
232 |
38 |
Corporate criticized my reports as being "too dry". |
1.5546 |
0.01811 |
1493 |
846 |
466 |
181 |
39 |
I’m trying to keep the company afloat. |
1.5476 |
0.01798 |
1534 |
884 |
460 |
190 |
40 |
Sorry Bob, our records show that your vacation is NEXT week. |
1.5418 |
0.01879 |
1458 |
862 |
402 |
194 |
41 |
I work in liquid assets. |
1.5415 |
0.02649 |
698 |
404 |
210 |
84 |
42 |
My doctor told me to spend more time in the pool. |
1.5401 |
0.01831 |
1433 |
825 |
442 |
166 |
43 |
Well the sign says "Suit Required" |
1.5383 |
0.01658 |
1969 |
1197 |
484 |
288 |
44 |
Just changed my zoom background ,so they think I'm working from home. |
1.5380 |
0.02338 |
894 |
520 |
267 |
107 |
45 |
So this isn't the applicant pool? |
1.5360 |
0.01868 |
1444 |
854 |
406 |
184 |
46 |
I'm practicing my key stroke. |
1.5330 |
0.01719 |
1741 |
1044 |
466 |
231 |
47 |
First name ‘Marco’, last name…? |
1.5312 |
0.01843 |
1664 |
1043 |
358 |
263 |
48 |
On a scale of 1 to 10, how likely are you to recommend this pool to a friend or colleague? |
1.5268 |
0.01817 |
1585 |
967 |
401 |
217 |
49 |
I’m practicing the keystroke. |
1.5264 |
0.01757 |
1607 |
959 |
450 |
198 |
50 |
Caption contest finalists— Paul Nesja and Beth Lawler, have their own podcast; whereon, they inform their loyal listeners of their weekly entries; as well as point out to them, the awfulness of the two captions that they ultimately compete against. |
1.5256 |
0.02133 |
1619 |
1162 |
63 |
394 |
51 |
Your swimsuit is on backorder. |
1.5256 |
0.01986 |
1191 |
696 |
364 |
131 |
52 |
As your lawyer, I'm obligated to inform you that calling it the breast stroke is what got you in trouble with HR. |
1.5250 |
0.01946 |
1421 |
880 |
336 |
205 |
53 |
It’s sync or swim. |
1.5194 |
0.02010 |
1288 |
793 |
321 |
174 |
54 |
My wife told me I've been spending too much time in the office. |
1.5185 |
0.02032 |
1084 |
629 |
348 |
107 |
55 |
We have an amazing remote work policy. |
1.5183 |
0.02291 |
849 |
492 |
274 |
83 |
56 |
And, to help us improve, would you say this pool is Much Better, Somewhat Better, the Same, Somewhat Worse, or Much Worse than our former pool? |
1.5175 |
0.01957 |
1397 |
873 |
325 |
199 |
57 |
When did you last see your bathing suit? |
1.5171 |
0.01999 |
1431 |
921 |
280 |
230 |
58 |
She asked how she’d recognize me. |
1.5167 |
0.02105 |
1076 |
642 |
312 |
122 |
59 |
How to be a caption finalist: A) Have a weekly podcast (to promote your captions); and, B) Submit each caption, several times (using different email addresses); so that voters won’t have to wade through thousands of entries, to get to your caption. |
1.5157 |
0.02325 |
1334 |
960 |
60 |
314 |
60 |
I'm the YMCPA. |
1.5123 |
0.01988 |
1302 |
807 |
323 |
172 |
61 |
I'm very sorry but you are in the work-from-home lane. |
1.5099 |
0.02056 |
1263 |
798 |
286 |
179 |
62 |
Look, I’ve showered and I don’t have active diarrhea. |
1.5099 |
0.02303 |
1269 |
890 |
111 |
268 |
63 |
It totally works. They all think it's a virtual background. |
1.5073 |
0.01981 |
1295 |
805 |
323 |
167 |
64 |
Of course we're all here. We work in the office pool. |
1.5000 |
0.02741 |
624 |
380 |
176 |
68 |
65 |
I'm emailing the lifeguard, who's working from home. |
1.4991 |
0.02229 |
1086 |
701 |
228 |
157 |
66 |
I'm a sucker for office pools. |
1.4989 |
0.02310 |
876 |
534 |
247 |
95 |
67 |
May we interrupt your swim for a brief survey? |
1.4980 |
0.02199 |
1004 |
622 |
264 |
118 |
68 |
Don’t forget to always vote for Beth Lawler’s and Paul Nesja’s caption entries! (Tune into their weekly podcast, for details.) |
1.4978 |
0.02535 |
1119 |
824 |
33 |
262 |
69 |
Do you have an appointment |
1.4972 |
0.02278 |
893 |
544 |
254 |
95 |
70 |
Yeah, unfortunately our “Summer Fridays” still have a dress code. |
1.4968 |
0.02406 |
791 |
480 |
229 |
82 |
71 |
Wait... you mean you can just upload a photo to use as a Zoom background? |
1.4968 |
0.02181 |
1087 |
692 |
250 |
145 |
72 |
Welcome to the office pool. |
1.4962 |
0.02108 |
1040 |
634 |
296 |
110 |
73 |
Unfortunately, the editors usually want greater depth |
1.4919 |
0.02538 |
738 |
458 |
197 |
83 |
74 |
I packed the wrong suit. |
1.4915 |
0.02178 |
1003 |
623 |
267 |
113 |
75 |
I've been running the numbers, and your barely treading water here. |
1.4900 |
0.02454 |
804 |
504 |
206 |
94 |
76 |
I'm new. My supervisor forgot to tell me about casual Fridays. |
1.4884 |
0.02618 |
649 |
395 |
191 |
63 |
77 |
If you weren't my wealthiest client there's no way in hell I'd keep meeting you like this. |
1.4880 |
0.02300 |
961 |
616 |
221 |
124 |
78 |
The standing desk was alright, but this is easier on the knees. |
1.4879 |
0.02163 |
992 |
614 |
272 |
106 |
79 |
My production has doubled now that I no longer need bathroom breaks. |
1.4878 |
0.02387 |
945 |
620 |
189 |
136 |
80 |
The virtual backgrounds are only on the paid version |
1.4876 |
0.02527 |
765 |
483 |
191 |
91 |
81 |
I’ve been taking swim lessons remotely for 2 years. I think I know what I’m doing, Greg. |
1.4861 |
0.02395 |
901 |
583 |
198 |
120 |
82 |
All the restrooms are full. |
1.4853 |
0.02574 |
783 |
508 |
170 |
105 |
83 |
Isn’t this the laptop lane? |
1.4838 |
0.02532 |
711 |
440 |
198 |
73 |
84 |
This is as relaxed as I get. |
1.4836 |
0.02251 |
883 |
543 |
253 |
87 |
85 |
Can you float me a loan? |
1.4835 |
0.02660 |
908 |
647 |
83 |
178 |
86 |
Work from anywhere, they said |
1.4815 |
0.02242 |
918 |
573 |
248 |
97 |
87 |
You know, when they told me I’d be drowning in work, this is not what I imagined. |
1.4814 |
0.02310 |
887 |
559 |
229 |
99 |
88 |
I prefer the keystroke myself |
1.4803 |
0.02339 |
837 |
522 |
228 |
87 |
89 |
This may be a break from work for you, but it is billable hours for me. |
1.4795 |
0.02337 |
853 |
536 |
225 |
92 |
90 |
I already know how to swim. I’m learning how to surf. |
1.4787 |
0.02386 |
846 |
539 |
209 |
98 |
91 |
Semi-retired and loving it! |
1.4787 |
0.02309 |
867 |
544 |
231 |
92 |
92 |
I am required to take my vacation time. |
1.4780 |
0.02314 |
910 |
583 |
219 |
108 |
93 |
This is what they mean by ‘drowning in emails,’ right? |
1.4777 |
0.02476 |
739 |
461 |
203 |
75 |
94 |
In this case, and as your attorney, I would advise you to start wearing a swimsuit. |
1.4765 |
0.02398 |
829 |
528 |
207 |
94 |
95 |
I'll let you know when you're in over your head.” |
1.4752 |
0.02715 |
848 |
604 |
85 |
159 |
96 |
I’m allowed to work remotely, but I’m expected to be online and dressed professionally at all times. |
1.4749 |
0.02515 |
758 |
485 |
186 |
87 |
97 |
I'm pooling my assets. |
1.4743 |
0.02781 |
799 |
567 |
85 |
147 |
98 |
Is there an outlet down there? |
1.4730 |
0.02714 |
649 |
416 |
159 |
74 |
99 |
Any additional liquid assets?” |
1.4690 |
0.02445 |
742 |
466 |
204 |
72 |
100 |
Remembering that you are still under oath, did you or did you not pee in this pool? |
1.4681 |
0.02568 |
769 |
508 |
162 |
99 |
101 |
Just this one more report and I'm on vacation. |
1.4666 |
0.02510 |
703 |
443 |
192 |
68 |
102 |
I signed on as a pool reporter. |
1.4618 |
0.02483 |
747 |
481 |
187 |
79 |
103 |
They can't tell I'm wearing trunks. |
1.4614 |
0.02641 |
661 |
426 |
165 |
70 |
104 |
Sorry Bob, I reserved this lane for another 30 minutes. |
1.4602 |
0.02621 |
691 |
451 |
162 |
78 |
105 |
I'll need the 8 digit security code I just texted you. |
1.4598 |
0.02615 |
696 |
455 |
162 |
79 |
106 |
Starbucks was closed |
1.4590 |
0.02658 |
658 |
427 |
160 |
71 |
107 |
I'm the lifeguard but I run a business on the side. |
1.4578 |
0.02725 |
664 |
441 |
142 |
81 |
108 |
It’s called ‘work-life integration’ now, Greg |
1.4578 |
0.02667 |
640 |
413 |
161 |
66 |
109 |
I’m drowning in paperwork, Gary. |
1.4572 |
0.02594 |
689 |
448 |
167 |
74 |
110 |
Company mandated 1 hour of fitness & leisure time |
1.4516 |
0.02591 |
640 |
409 |
173 |
58 |
111 |
I started in the typing pool. |
1.4516 |
0.02724 |
609 |
396 |
151 |
62 |
112 |
My therapist is the crazy one. She thinks I'm a workaholic. |
1.4513 |
0.02847 |
585 |
387 |
132 |
66 |
113 |
You've never heard of the typing pool? |
1.4492 |
0.02779 |
610 |
404 |
138 |
68 |
114 |
Polo! Apologies everyone, thought I was on mute. |
1.4485 |
0.02836 |
582 |
385 |
133 |
64 |
115 |
Have you taken a swim test with us before? |
1.4483 |
0.02758 |
580 |
376 |
148 |
56 |
116 |
I was told to water down the Q4
results before the annual meeting. |
1.4481 |
0.02885 |
520 |
335 |
137 |
48 |
117 |
I get to deduct it as a home office expense |
1.4469 |
0.02587 |
631 |
404 |
172 |
55 |
118 |
The cardiologist told me to spend some time in the pool. |
1.4450 |
0.02770 |
573 |
373 |
145 |
55 |
119 |
This is the least expensive office space in New York. That’s why. |
1.4448 |
0.02713 |
580 |
374 |
154 |
52 |
120 |
Better than the typing pool. |
1.4434 |
0.02905 |
521 |
340 |
131 |
50 |
121 |
I'm swimming in emails and trying to keep my head above water. |
1.4428 |
0.02649 |
603 |
389 |
161 |
53 |
122 |
And on a scale of one to five, one being not wet and five being wettest, how wet would you say the water is? |
1.4427 |
0.02900 |
567 |
381 |
121 |
65 |
123 |
I've got my Zoom shirt on. |
1.4421 |
0.02813 |
579 |
384 |
134 |
61 |
124 |
I’m sorry, but we’re looking for someone much taller who can work in the deep end. |
1.4420 |
0.02947 |
552 |
372 |
116 |
64 |
125 |
I don’t do casual Friday, Ron. |
1.4419 |
0.02842 |
559 |
369 |
133 |
57 |
126 |
The restroom was locked, and I really needed to go. |
1.4395 |
0.03129 |
512 |
352 |
95 |
65 |
127 |
Well, I was drowning in paperwork. |
1.4392 |
0.02973 |
485 |
316 |
125 |
44 |
128 |
This was the only time available on your calendar |
1.4389 |
0.02996 |
483 |
316 |
122 |
45 |
129 |
I needed a better Zoom background. |
1.4373 |
0.02832 |
558 |
370 |
132 |
56 |
130 |
Are you OK with an in-depth interview? |
1.4370 |
0.02792 |
540 |
351 |
142 |
47 |
131 |
If these are your liquid assets,
we are both in trouble. |
1.4356 |
0.03137 |
427 |
278 |
112 |
37 |
132 |
My doctor told me that I was too Type A and suggested that I relax in a pool! |
1.4355 |
0.02991 |
535 |
364 |
109 |
62 |
133 |
Yes the business is underwater so this feels right |
1.4342 |
0.02870 |
532 |
352 |
129 |
51 |
134 |
One a scale from 1-5, how would you rate your pool experience? |
1.4321 |
0.02937 |
486 |
318 |
126 |
42 |
135 |
I thought it said lap-top swimming. |
1.4318 |
0.02906 |
535 |
359 |
121 |
55 |
136 |
It's okay, I'm on mute. Polo! |
1.4306 |
0.03027 |
497 |
335 |
110 |
52 |
137 |
I can type three laps a minute. |
1.4286 |
0.03094 |
406 |
261 |
116 |
29 |
138 |
The plaintiff claims you were negligent in failing to respond "Polo." |
1.4277 |
0.03609 |
470 |
355 |
29 |
86 |
139 |
When they figure out that you can work anywhere, anytime, it’s a short step to everywhere, all the time. |
1.4265 |
0.03124 |
490 |
338 |
95 |
57 |
140 |
Was she wearing goggles? |
1.4260 |
0.03146 |
507 |
356 |
86 |
65 |
141 |
The treadmill desks were sold out. |
1.4218 |
0.03226 |
422 |
285 |
96 |
41 |
142 |
They can only see the top half! |
1.4198 |
0.02930 |
486 |
324 |
120 |
42 |
143 |
Well...it IS a laptop. |
1.4185 |
0.03049 |
466 |
315 |
107 |
44 |
144 |
I don't even have time for a bathroom break. |
1.4161 |
0.03547 |
471 |
357 |
32 |
82 |
145 |
I’m Phil from HR. Did you use the word “breast stroke? |
1.4160 |
0.03548 |
387 |
273 |
67 |
47 |
146 |
It's called a swimming desk. It's actually much healthier than sitting |
1.4157 |
0.03052 |
445 |
298 |
109 |
38 |
147 |
I think testing the water before a new venture is a good idea. |
1.4153 |
0.03139 |
431 |
291 |
101 |
39 |
148 |
I'm liquidating my assets. |
1.4133 |
0.03202 |
450 |
313 |
88 |
49 |
149 |
I know,but this ls the only spot in the Y that has Wi fi |
1.4124 |
0.03122 |
434 |
294 |
101 |
39 |
150 |
Shush...they think it's a Zoom background. |
1.4112 |
0.02965 |
445 |
295 |
117 |
33 |
151 |
Of course I’m not wearing shoes. I’m on vacation! |
1.4094 |
0.03167 |
425 |
290 |
96 |
39 |
152 |
I don't pee in your pool, so please don't swim in my meeting. |
1.4057 |
0.03250 |
419 |
291 |
86 |
42 |
153 |
They told me to look for help in the secretarial pool. |
1.4039 |
0.03091 |
411 |
276 |
104 |
31 |
154 |
I'm still trying to find a work - life balance. |
1.4037 |
0.03123 |
436 |
300 |
96 |
40 |
155 |
Sometimes I can’t tell if I’m drowning in work, or actually just drowning. |
1.4026 |
0.03296 |
385 |
264 |
87 |
34 |
156 |
What's the oddest thing you've seen today? |
1.4025 |
0.03276 |
395 |
272 |
87 |
36 |
157 |
I’m new to the typing pool. |
1.4015 |
0.03127 |
411 |
279 |
99 |
33 |
158 |
This is not as much fun as it looks. |
1.4000 |
0.03279 |
370 |
251 |
90 |
29 |
159 |
That was a taxable gainer. |
1.3990 |
0.03674 |
386 |
286 |
46 |
54 |
160 |
You blocked our calls. |
1.3989 |
0.03730 |
376 |
279 |
44 |
53 |
161 |
It’s okay—I brought rice. |
1.3989 |
0.03529 |
356 |
250 |
70 |
36 |
162 |
HR did not approve my PTO |
1.3985 |
0.03207 |
389 |
265 |
93 |
31 |
163 |
In the last 12 months, how many times have you peed in this pool? |
1.3984 |
0.03425 |
374 |
262 |
75 |
37 |
164 |
When you said you had liquid assets ... |
1.3980 |
0.03154 |
402 |
274 |
96 |
32 |
165 |
To qualify for our best life insurance rate, you're going to have to start wearing sunscreen. |
1.3978 |
0.03341 |
367 |
252 |
84 |
31 |
166 |
I told my boss I needed to get some typing done. He said I should take it to the pool. |
1.3977 |
0.03488 |
352 |
245 |
74 |
33 |
167 |
Actually, I’m a White House pool reporter. |
1.3975 |
0.03311 |
395 |
276 |
81 |
38 |
168 |
Sorry, this lane is reserved for people working remotely. |
1.3969 |
0.03342 |
393 |
276 |
78 |
39 |
169 |
I could try to write off your new snorkel, but don't hold your breath. |
1.3954 |
0.03757 |
349 |
255 |
50 |
44 |
170 |
I’m scared to go under. |
1.3953 |
0.03571 |
387 |
283 |
55 |
49 |
171 |
I thought this was the YMCPA. |
1.3953 |
0.03675 |
301 |
207 |
69 |
25 |
172 |
I'm doing virtual laps. |
1.3931 |
0.03382 |
346 |
237 |
82 |
27 |
173 |
My boss told me to take a vacation. |
1.3927 |
0.03179 |
382 |
260 |
94 |
28 |
174 |
Sir, we’ve been trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty. |
1.3927 |
0.03547 |
382 |
278 |
58 |
46 |
175 |
Sorry, but I'm waist-deep in work right now. |
1.3921 |
0.03476 |
329 |
226 |
77 |
26 |
176 |
As lifeguard and legal counsel, I warn you that you are getting in over your head. |
1.3920 |
0.03328 |
375 |
261 |
81 |
33 |
177 |
Standing desks are so 2021 |
1.3911 |
0.03095 |
381 |
256 |
101 |
24 |
178 |
Covid closed the office,my wife threw me out,and the bar is too crowed. |
1.3905 |
0.03068 |
402 |
273 |
101 |
28 |
179 |
Don’t worry about it. My boss said that I can work from anywhere. |
1.3905 |
0.03015 |
379 |
251 |
108 |
20 |
180 |
I had to pee... |
1.3903 |
0.03558 |
351 |
250 |
65 |
36 |
181 |
How do you spell incontinence? |
1.3903 |
0.03297 |
351 |
239 |
87 |
25 |
182 |
Is this a good time to go over your insurance coverage? |
1.3903 |
0.03264 |
392 |
274 |
83 |
35 |
183 |
Well they might think I was in the office if you didn't keep yelling "Cannonball". |
1.3896 |
0.03334 |
367 |
255 |
81 |
31 |
184 |
I don’t need to wear pants for Zoom meetings. |
1.3892 |
0.03550 |
352 |
251 |
65 |
36 |
185 |
It’s a business wetsuit. |
1.3879 |
0.03314 |
348 |
238 |
85 |
25 |
186 |
I’m usually in hot water. |
1.3876 |
0.03680 |
338 |
244 |
57 |
37 |
187 |
The treadmill thing just didn't work for me. |
1.3874 |
0.03495 |
333 |
232 |
73 |
28 |
188 |
I tried working at home, but I wasn't getting any exercise. |
1.3856 |
0.03208 |
376 |
259 |
89 |
28 |
189 |
How’d you guess I’m from the States?” |
1.3848 |
0.03402 |
356 |
250 |
75 |
31 |
190 |
Fuck Off |
1.3838 |
0.03809 |
357 |
270 |
37 |
50 |
191 |
Now, can we wade into your tax deductions? |
1.3836 |
0.03341 |
365 |
256 |
78 |
31 |
192 |
I'm sure they said I had to join the office pool. |
1.3832 |
0.03509 |
334 |
235 |
70 |
29 |
193 |
This is the lap lane, and that’s my laptop. |
1.3829 |
0.03399 |
363 |
257 |
73 |
33 |
194 |
I'm busy pooling my assets. |
1.3822 |
0.03358 |
348 |
242 |
79 |
27 |
195 |
I've added accidental drowning-just in case you wander down to the deep end. |
1.3822 |
0.03431 |
348 |
245 |
73 |
30 |
196 |
Uh oh. My boss wants to Zoom. |
1.3815 |
0.03445 |
346 |
244 |
72 |
30 |
197 |
Donald said he needed to store some things in my office |
1.3814 |
0.03528 |
354 |
255 |
63 |
36 |
198 |
My boss said I couldn't work from home anymore. |
1.3786 |
0.03417 |
346 |
244 |
73 |
29 |
199 |
I hear there are hackers in the deep end |
1.3785 |
0.03438 |
325 |
226 |
75 |
24 |
200 |
Get the lifegaurd. I'm drowning in emails. |
1.3761 |
0.03284 |
343 |
237 |
83 |
23 |
201 |
You stay in your lane and I'll stay in mine. |
1.3758 |
0.03401 |
322 |
223 |
77 |
22 |
202 |
It’s a nice break from working from home with no pants. |
1.3743 |
0.03441 |
342 |
243 |
70 |
29 |
203 |
Might as well. Our assets are underwater, too. |
1.3743 |
0.03260 |
334 |
229 |
85 |
20 |
204 |
I tried the standing desk and the sitting desk, but this is supposed to be easier on the knees. |
1.3742 |
0.03459 |
310 |
215 |
74 |
21 |
205 |
Oh it's fine, I'm muted. |
1.3738 |
0.03558 |
305 |
214 |
68 |
23 |
206 |
Sir, this lane is for lap tops only. |
1.3730 |
0.03389 |
311 |
214 |
78 |
19 |
207 |
Tell me again the last place you saw your bathing suit. |
1.3729 |
0.03867 |
303 |
223 |
47 |
33 |
208 |
„…so front desk told
me you need some help with liquid assets, did I get that right?“ |
1.3725 |
0.03422 |
298 |
204 |
77 |
17 |
209 |
And on a scale of 1 to 10, how satisfied are you with our firm’s commitment to meet you any time, anywhere? |
1.3724 |
0.04142 |
290 |
220 |
32 |
38 |
210 |
No, I'm not in over my head. |
1.3724 |
0.03292 |
333 |
230 |
82 |
21 |
211 |
I only work with mortgage holders who are underwater. |
1.3720 |
0.03543 |
328 |
235 |
64 |
29 |
212 |
You mind moving to the deep end? My next meeting is cameras on. |
1.3706 |
0.03520 |
313 |
221 |
68 |
24 |
213 |
But it’s a cool Zoom background, right? |
1.3705 |
0.03431 |
305 |
211 |
75 |
19 |
214 |
So would you say you pee in the pool always, sometimes or never? |
1.3705 |
0.03703 |
305 |
220 |
57 |
28 |
215 |
I'm semi-retired. |
1.3702 |
0.03415 |
362 |
262 |
66 |
34 |
216 |
HR had no choice but to accept my work-from-home request after I identified as Amphibian. |
1.3701 |
0.04026 |
281 |
208 |
42 |
31 |
217 |
As a serious writer I'm still just getting my feet wet. |
1.3694 |
0.03540 |
314 |
223 |
66 |
25 |
218 |
Sorry, but the boss says if you don’t come to the office, the office is coming to you. |
1.3681 |
0.03505 |
307 |
216 |
69 |
22 |
219 |
Before I surf the web I like to wade it. |
1.3674 |
0.03428 |
313 |
219 |
73 |
21 |
220 |
Could you splash less? I need this to look like I'm in an office. |
1.3672 |
0.03699 |
305 |
221 |
56 |
28 |
221 |
You're actually the first to ask. |
1.3671 |
0.03648 |
286 |
202 |
63 |
21 |
222 |
You've never joined an office pool? |
1.3668 |
0.03687 |
289 |
206 |
60 |
23 |
223 |
It's the best solution I could come up with. My company doesn't allow bathroom breaks. |
1.3659 |
0.03640 |
328 |
241 |
54 |
33 |
224 |
Public pool, public wi-fi. Case closed. |
1.3659 |
0.03262 |
328 |
227 |
82 |
19 |
225 |
Sorry, your pool pass has expired. |
1.3656 |
0.03639 |
279 |
196 |
64 |
19 |
226 |
As long as I wear a tie, I am technically ‘in the office.’ |
1.3653 |
0.03465 |
323 |
230 |
68 |
25 |
227 |
...and would you say our company's repeated attempts to solicit data grabs through pop up surveys more intrusive, less intrusive, or about the same? |
1.3645 |
0.03719 |
299 |
217 |
55 |
27 |
228 |
Yes.This was the typists' pool in the 70's. |
1.3644 |
0.04200 |
247 |
182 |
40 |
25 |
229 |
Did anyone bring a charger? |
1.3642 |
0.03570 |
313 |
225 |
62 |
26 |
230 |
I thought the pool party was virtual. |
1.3633 |
0.03648 |
300 |
216 |
59 |
25 |
231 |
It’s actually getting better - on my first day they threw me in the deep end. |
1.3630 |
0.03789 |
281 |
203 |
54 |
24 |
232 |
When did you become aware that your bathing suit was missing? |
1.3611 |
0.03785 |
288 |
210 |
52 |
26 |
233 |
I needed to pee... |
1.3608 |
0.03757 |
291 |
212 |
53 |
26 |
234 |
My boss thinks it's a virtual background. |
1.3591 |
0.03822 |
259 |
185 |
55 |
19 |
235 |
I'm into liquidity. |
1.3571 |
0.03583 |
280 |
198 |
64 |
18 |
236 |
Our CPA said we need to become more liquid. |
1.3569 |
0.03429 |
311 |
221 |
69 |
21 |
237 |
We can write this off as Physical Therapy,
Plus the mileage to & from.
Keep records & get a receipt. |
1.3569 |
0.03661 |
283 |
203 |
59 |
21 |
238 |
just go around me. |
1.3566 |
0.03600 |
286 |
204 |
62 |
20 |
239 |
Any outlets down there? |
1.3566 |
0.03667 |
286 |
206 |
58 |
22 |
240 |
I just can't work from home- too many distractions. |
1.3550 |
0.03824 |
262 |
189 |
53 |
20 |
241 |
As long as my hair isn't wet, nobody can tell. |
1.3547 |
0.03793 |
265 |
191 |
54 |
20 |
242 |
Chris Licht said I could be a great pool reporter. |
1.3529 |
0.03635 |
289 |
209 |
58 |
22 |
243 |
I may have messed up a few key strokes. |
1.3523 |
0.03308 |
281 |
193 |
77 |
11 |
244 |
Sorry. That type of "shrinkage" does not qualify for a payout under your current water damage policy. |
1.3517 |
0.04326 |
236 |
178 |
33 |
25 |
245 |
Yes, I am a pool reporter |
1.3511 |
0.03780 |
262 |
189 |
54 |
19 |
246 |
You're just a Zoom background, you know. |
1.3509 |
0.03711 |
265 |
190 |
57 |
18 |
247 |
It's called work/life balance, but all I do is ruin shoes. |
1.3498 |
0.03982 |
243 |
177 |
47 |
19 |
248 |
The title is "What I did during my summer vacation." |
1.3491 |
0.03578 |
275 |
196 |
62 |
17 |
249 |
Your portfolio has taken a dive. |
1.3486 |
0.03640 |
284 |
206 |
57 |
21 |
250 |
The talent pool is so different nowadays. |
1.3480 |
0.03441 |
273 |
191 |
69 |
13 |
251 |
Life guard or life insurance? So I thought, why not both? |
1.3471 |
0.03609 |
291 |
212 |
57 |
22 |
252 |
I’m trying to bring back the typing pool. |
1.3456 |
0.03674 |
272 |
197 |
56 |
19 |
253 |
The treadmill desk was too hard on my knees. |
1.3441 |
0.03713 |
247 |
176 |
57 |
14 |
254 |
Yeah it’s a great company. Believe it or not, they let you work from anywhere during vacations. |
1.3436 |
0.03799 |
259 |
189 |
51 |
19 |
255 |
This isn’t what I meant by liquid assets. |
1.3427 |
0.03873 |
248 |
181 |
49 |
18 |
256 |
Of course not, what kind of psycho wears socks in the pool? |
1.3413 |
0.04437 |
208 |
156 |
33 |
19 |
257 |
Liquid assets joke entry #473 |
1.3406 |
0.04009 |
276 |
212 |
34 |
30 |
258 |
I have to say, it's been much easier since I moved to the shallow end. |
1.3396 |
0.04027 |
265 |
202 |
36 |
27 |
259 |
I told the AI, I feeling like I'm swimming in data... and this happened. |
1.3382 |
0.03671 |
275 |
202 |
53 |
20 |
260 |
I hate to waste my membership. |
1.3371 |
0.03708 |
267 |
196 |
52 |
19 |
261 |
It's 9 o'clock somewhere. |
1.3363 |
0.03645 |
223 |
156 |
59 |
8 |
262 |
Do I have enough work? I’m swimming in it!! |
1.3347 |
0.03732 |
239 |
172 |
54 |
13 |
263 |
The boss banned work from home... he didn't say diddly about work from pool. |
1.3347 |
0.03568 |
251 |
179 |
60 |
12 |
264 |
I thought it was business casual |
1.3347 |
0.03700 |
251 |
182 |
54 |
15 |
265 |
The office said we had to pool our resources. |
1.3333 |
0.03824 |
243 |
178 |
49 |
16 |
266 |
Let’s make this quick, I have another client at the shallow end. |
1.3320 |
0.03833 |
250 |
185 |
47 |
18 |
267 |
Sure, my best ideas still happen in the shower, but this is the only place I can get through emails. |
1.3304 |
0.03752 |
227 |
163 |
53 |
11 |
268 |
I find working from home to be too depressing, but the office is too stressful |
1.3302 |
0.03775 |
215 |
153 |
53 |
9 |
269 |
I couldn't get the Zoom virtual background to work. |
1.3294 |
0.03765 |
252 |
186 |
49 |
17 |
270 |
I’m swimming in debt. |
1.3292 |
0.03342 |
243 |
169 |
68 |
6 |
271 |
I'll need to see two laps of butterfly before I can determine if you qualify for a better rate than our Preferred Non-Swimmers. |
1.3289 |
0.03771 |
225 |
162 |
52 |
11 |
272 |
Give me a minute while I learn how to swim on Youtube. |
1.3279 |
0.03759 |
244 |
179 |
50 |
15 |
273 |
I’m zoom interviewing for a swimming instructor position. |
1.3276 |
0.03938 |
232 |
172 |
44 |
16 |
274 |
I know what it looks like but I am not even remotely working |
1.3275 |
0.03876 |
229 |
168 |
47 |
14 |
275 |
But I'm a wiz at the keystroke. |
1.3267 |
0.04224 |
202 |
150 |
38 |
14 |
276 |
The key is to blur your background and remember not to say "Polo." |
1.3259 |
0.04320 |
224 |
173 |
29 |
22 |
277 |
Bathroom breaks were slowing me down. |
1.3254 |
0.04178 |
209 |
156 |
38 |
15 |
278 |
I find “Work/Life Balance” is easier to attaint when buoyant. |
1.3251 |
0.03719 |
243 |
178 |
51 |
14 |
279 |
I guess I should have clarified what I meant by a standing desk. |
1.3243 |
0.03630 |
222 |
158 |
56 |
8 |
280 |
We all have our own ways of quiet quitting. |
1.3242 |
0.04093 |
219 |
164 |
39 |
16 |
281 |
This way I can keep working through bathroom breaks and leave work early! |
1.3231 |
0.04061 |
229 |
173 |
38 |
18 |
282 |
I want my online swimming classes to feel authentic. |
1.3227 |
0.03921 |
220 |
162 |
45 |
13 |
283 |
Do you want pickles with that? |
1.3217 |
0.03998 |
230 |
173 |
40 |
17 |
284 |
We have flexible working conditions. |
1.3213 |
0.03906 |
221 |
163 |
45 |
13 |
285 |
Have you seen the prices of adult diapers? |
1.3211 |
0.04460 |
190 |
144 |
31 |
15 |
286 |
of course I brought my laptop, this is a lap pool |
1.3200 |
0.04201 |
225 |
173 |
32 |
20 |
287 |
When is the last time you saw your floaties? |
1.3197 |
0.04004 |
244 |
187 |
36 |
21 |
288 |
What's your Wi-Fi password? |
1.3196 |
0.03873 |
219 |
161 |
46 |
12 |
289 |
Since you haven’t responded to our email from customer service, I’m here to help you complete this short survey . . . |
1.3194 |
0.04249 |
191 |
142 |
37 |
12 |
290 |
Life guard? No, I'm with Guardian Life. Speaking of which, if you drowned today, do you know how your family would get by? |
1.3188 |
0.04357 |
207 |
159 |
30 |
18 |
291 |
Are you very satisfied, satisfied, unsatisfied or very unsatisfied with me interrupting your pool time? |
1.3186 |
0.04061 |
204 |
151 |
41 |
12 |
292 |
My other assets are underwater. |
1.3184 |
0.04226 |
223 |
172 |
31 |
20 |
293 |
What they really mean when they say unlimited PTO |
1.3178 |
0.04252 |
214 |
164 |
32 |
18 |
294 |
Polo. |
1.3167 |
0.04277 |
180 |
133 |
37 |
10 |
295 |
I told the board that the labor pool is cooling off. |
1.3165 |
0.03878 |
218 |
161 |
45 |
12 |
296 |
Your entire department has gone off the deep end.” |
1.3163 |
0.04627 |
215 |
173 |
16 |
26 |
297 |
Hi, Bob, I’ve been trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty |
1.3144 |
0.04183 |
229 |
178 |
30 |
21 |
298 |
My advice... stay out of the deep end |
1.3141 |
0.04105 |
191 |
141 |
40 |
10 |
299 |
I know how to do my job. Stay in your lane. |
1.3139 |
0.03867 |
223 |
166 |
44 |
13 |
300 |
What’s this “day of rest” shit? |
1.3133 |
0.04173 |
233 |
182 |
29 |
22 |
301 |
Remote work won over Casual Friday. |
1.3130 |
0.03735 |
230 |
170 |
48 |
12 |
302 |
We just need you to answer a few questions . . .
First question, "Marco?" |
1.3128 |
0.04389 |
211 |
165 |
26 |
20 |
303 |
He said I have to pool all of the data. |
1.3125 |
0.03955 |
224 |
169 |
40 |
15 |
304 |
It’s a working vacation. Why do you ask? |
1.3119 |
0.04029 |
218 |
165 |
38 |
15 |
305 |
Unfortunately, it is a working vacation. |
1.3107 |
0.04301 |
206 |
159 |
30 |
17 |
306 |
My job evaluation said I should learn to multitask. |
1.3100 |
0.03972 |
200 |
148 |
42 |
10 |
307 |
So when they hired me I was told that access to the company's health club facilities was part of the package. They never told me I wouldn't have an office. |
1.3091 |
0.04518 |
165 |
124 |
31 |
10 |
308 |
Shut the fuck up, I’m buying DVDs |
1.3081 |
0.04630 |
211 |
171 |
15 |
25 |
309 |
Yes, sir, I’ll be sure to underline the importance of work life balance. |
1.3070 |
0.03585 |
228 |
167 |
52 |
9 |
310 |
I'm sorry Gerald, I can't just jump into this "vacation mindset" business.. |
1.3070 |
0.03603 |
215 |
156 |
52 |
7 |
311 |
What do you mean I’m not enjoying myself. It’s been years since I let go like this. |
1.3066 |
0.03814 |
212 |
157 |
45 |
10 |
312 |
I like to come every afternoon to get in a few laptops. |
1.3062 |
0.04301 |
209 |
163 |
28 |
18 |
313 |
Here at the NEW IRS, we make an effort to audit taxpayers at their convenience. |
1.3058 |
0.04235 |
206 |
159 |
31 |
16 |
314 |
I typed How To Swim into ChatGPT |
1.3058 |
0.04121 |
206 |
157 |
35 |
14 |
315 |
I specialize in the key stroke. |
1.3052 |
0.04343 |
213 |
168 |
25 |
20 |
316 |
This is the way I pool my resources. |
1.3051 |
0.04297 |
177 |
133 |
34 |
10 |
317 |
Can you quiet down, I’m about to unmute |
1.3046 |
0.04310 |
197 |
152 |
30 |
15 |
318 |
Not now. I’m in up to my waist. |
1.3043 |
0.04217 |
207 |
160 |
31 |
16 |
319 |
I wish these micromanagers would stay in their lane |
1.3041 |
0.04625 |
171 |
132 |
26 |
13 |
320 |
The CAPTCHA said I had to swim a lap to prove I'm human. |
1.3039 |
0.04260 |
204 |
158 |
30 |
16 |
321 |
Mr. Trump says you haven't paid your membership dues this week ! |
1.3037 |
0.04079 |
191 |
143 |
38 |
10 |
322 |
And how do you like the shallow end of the talent pool? |
1.3035 |
0.04187 |
201 |
154 |
33 |
14 |
323 |
Men can multitask too |
1.3032 |
0.03981 |
188 |
139 |
41 |
8 |
324 |
No, Phil, I'm not interested in playing water polo. |
1.3026 |
0.04150 |
195 |
148 |
35 |
12 |
325 |
You're a very hard. man to track down. |
1.3023 |
0.04451 |
172 |
131 |
30 |
11 |
326 |
It’s my way of surfing the web, no board. |
1.3022 |
0.04352 |
182 |
139 |
31 |
12 |
327 |
My firm is all about work-life balance |
1.3014 |
0.03721 |
219 |
163 |
46 |
10 |
328 |
I just hopped in here to pee. |
1.3010 |
0.04110 |
206 |
158 |
34 |
14 |
329 |
Go ahead, I’m on mute |
1.3005 |
0.04032 |
203 |
154 |
37 |
12 |
330 |
It’s amazing the places you can find free WI-FI! |
1.3005 |
0.04014 |
213 |
163 |
36 |
14 |
331 |
I'm sorry to say, your portfolio is under water. |
1.3000 |
0.03874 |
190 |
140 |
43 |
7 |
332 |
Even your stock options are under water. |
1.2995 |
0.04237 |
197 |
152 |
31 |
14 |
333 |
This is a horrible wet dream. |
1.2995 |
0.04461 |
187 |
146 |
26 |
15 |
334 |
My new job allows me to take unlimited vacation time. |
1.2974 |
0.04325 |
195 |
152 |
28 |
15 |
335 |
My doctor said half an hour a day in the swimming pool would help my blood pressure. |
1.2970 |
0.04403 |
165 |
125 |
31 |
9 |
336 |
This way I can deduct my club membership as a business expense." |
1.2963 |
0.04020 |
189 |
142 |
38 |
9 |
337 |
You’d think so, but these new athletic-office pants really wick away the moisture." |
1.2957 |
0.04061 |
186 |
140 |
37 |
9 |
338 |
The A/C at the office is broken. |
1.2956 |
0.04421 |
159 |
120 |
31 |
8 |
339 |
My therapist just texted. She meant to say, “Try watering my plants.” |
1.2956 |
0.04198 |
203 |
158 |
30 |
15 |
340 |
This is my swim suit. |
1.2953 |
0.03962 |
193 |
145 |
39 |
9 |
341 |
Are you here on business or pleasure? |
1.2947 |
0.04070 |
190 |
144 |
36 |
10 |
342 |
Me? I’m semi-retired. |
1.2941 |
0.04808 |
153 |
119 |
23 |
11 |
343 |
This isn't the steno pool? |
1.2935 |
0.04084 |
184 |
139 |
36 |
9 |
344 |
I only know the keystroke. |
1.2932 |
0.03770 |
191 |
141 |
44 |
6 |
345 |
Says here you haven't returned your towels from last time. |
1.2919 |
0.04276 |
185 |
143 |
30 |
12 |
346 |
I hit the escape key and here I am. |
1.2917 |
0.04876 |
168 |
135 |
17 |
16 |
347 |
Just practicing my keystroke. |
1.2912 |
0.03719 |
182 |
133 |
45 |
4 |
348 |
When I corrected my boss he told me to stay in my lane. |
1.2907 |
0.04101 |
172 |
129 |
36 |
7 |
349 |
Ok, you've passed the practical test, now onto the written portion. |
1.2907 |
0.04101 |
172 |
129 |
36 |
7 |
350 |
They said we couldn't work from home anymore... |
1.2906 |
0.03820 |
203 |
153 |
41 |
9 |
351 |
The keystroke |
1.2899 |
0.03972 |
169 |
125 |
39 |
5 |
352 |
I’m using my home wallpaper. |
1.2898 |
0.04196 |
176 |
134 |
33 |
9 |
353 |
They will assume the pool is just a virtual background. |
1.2892 |
0.04014 |
166 |
123 |
38 |
5 |
354 |
As your lawyer, I advise you to stay out of the deep end. |
1.2889 |
0.04055 |
180 |
136 |
36 |
8 |
355 |
I’m completing the lifeguard re-certification class remotely. |
1.2888 |
0.04369 |
187 |
147 |
26 |
14 |
356 |
I come here for the wi-fi |
1.2883 |
0.04414 |
163 |
125 |
29 |
9 |
357 |
Business up top, Bermuda down below. |
1.2881 |
0.04326 |
177 |
137 |
29 |
11 |
358 |
It’s why it’s called a laptop |
1.2876 |
0.04789 |
153 |
120 |
22 |
11 |
359 |
Obviously, it's a LAP-top. |
1.2874 |
0.04582 |
167 |
131 |
24 |
12 |
360 |
data pool |
1.2873 |
0.04111 |
181 |
138 |
34 |
9 |
361 |
Hi, my name is Steve and I work for your health insurer... I just have a few questions about your health habits. |
1.2872 |
0.04283 |
188 |
147 |
28 |
13 |
362 |
I’m an accountant. This is as much fun as I can have with my clothes on. |
1.2867 |
0.05024 |
143 |
113 |
19 |
11 |
363 |
I miss the days when this sort of work was handled in the secretarial pool. |
1.2865 |
0.04078 |
178 |
135 |
35 |
8 |
364 |
A treadmill desk was too expensive, so I thought, why not? |
1.2857 |
0.04530 |
161 |
125 |
26 |
10 |
365 |
It’s Monday 9 A.M. somewhere. |
1.2857 |
0.04515 |
182 |
145 |
22 |
15 |
366 |
I DONT KNOW -,AI PUT ME HERE! |
1.2857 |
0.04129 |
189 |
146 |
32 |
11 |
367 |
My wife thinks I'm at work. |
1.2857 |
0.04060 |
189 |
145 |
34 |
10 |
368 |
It's the best wi-fi hotspot. |
1.2857 |
0.04173 |
161 |
121 |
34 |
6 |
369 |
Oh, I'm getting some sun, washing my pants, filing a report, checking my email, and doing a little social networking. That's the beauty of multitasking. What are you up to? |
1.2850 |
0.04068 |
193 |
149 |
33 |
11 |
370 |
I Googled "Swimming for Dummies." |
1.2848 |
0.04772 |
165 |
132 |
19 |
14 |
371 |
I'm still trying to find my own work play balance. |
1.2840 |
0.04456 |
169 |
132 |
26 |
11 |
372 |
It's this or Starbucks |
1.2840 |
0.04419 |
162 |
125 |
28 |
9 |
373 |
Why, then, do they call it a typing pool? |
1.2840 |
0.04505 |
162 |
126 |
26 |
10 |
374 |
I just finished debugging the new AI
lifeguard. She should work now. |
1.2838 |
0.04602 |
148 |
114 |
26 |
8 |
375 |
Well, I was searching for the Marco Polo website and ended up here |
1.2825 |
0.03920 |
177 |
133 |
38 |
6 |
376 |
I'm from the government. I'm here to help you. |
1.2824 |
0.04510 |
170 |
134 |
24 |
12 |
377 |
I'm transitioning back into the office. |
1.2824 |
0.04273 |
170 |
131 |
30 |
9 |
378 |
I think I’m out of my depth again |
1.2816 |
0.03960 |
174 |
131 |
37 |
6 |
379 |
Come any closer and I will Ctrl + X you. |
1.2816 |
0.04043 |
174 |
132 |
35 |
7 |
380 |
I just got an idea for a caption |
1.2812 |
0.04536 |
160 |
125 |
25 |
10 |
381 |
Mister Jones, is this a good time for your audit? |
1.2806 |
0.04793 |
139 |
108 |
23 |
8 |
382 |
When I clicked, I thought it said virtual background. |
1.2805 |
0.04540 |
164 |
129 |
24 |
11 |
383 |
This is me "on vacation" |
1.2800 |
0.03940 |
175 |
132 |
37 |
6 |
384 |
I can advise you regarding pooled funds... |
1.2796 |
0.04157 |
186 |
145 |
30 |
11 |
385 |
Standing desk 2.0 - that is, H 2.0! |
1.2796 |
0.04015 |
186 |
143 |
34 |
9 |
386 |
Don't judge. It's a start. |
1.2795 |
0.03961 |
161 |
120 |
37 |
4 |
387 |
So that was first name Marco, last name Polo? |
1.2791 |
0.04464 |
172 |
136 |
24 |
12 |
388 |
I'm still adapting to remote work. |
1.2791 |
0.04387 |
172 |
135 |
26 |
11 |
389 |
I call it "Business on top, pool party on the bottom." |
1.2791 |
0.04148 |
172 |
132 |
32 |
8 |
390 |
Since you won't come to the office, I've brought the office to you |
1.2788 |
0.04086 |
165 |
125 |
34 |
6 |
391 |
It's a wading desk. |
1.2775 |
0.04287 |
173 |
135 |
28 |
10 |
392 |
We each have our own definition of recreational swim. |
1.2765 |
0.04002 |
170 |
129 |
35 |
6 |
393 |
It just takes a few days for my brain to realize that I'm on vacation. |
1.2765 |
0.04415 |
170 |
134 |
25 |
11 |
394 |
And would you Strongly Disagree, Disagree, are Neutral, Agree, or Strongly Agree that the water in this pool is warm enough? |
1.2762 |
0.04153 |
181 |
141 |
30 |
10 |
395 |
Sometimes I mix business with pleasure. |
1.2760 |
0.03779 |
192 |
146 |
39 |
7 |
396 |
I’m drowning in emails. |
1.2759 |
0.04265 |
174 |
136 |
28 |
10 |
397 |
This is my virtual background. |
1.2759 |
0.04342 |
174 |
137 |
26 |
11 |
398 |
You should see my carpool. |
1.2756 |
0.04321 |
156 |
120 |
29 |
7 |
399 |
My best attempt at work-life balance |
1.2750 |
0.04429 |
160 |
125 |
26 |
9 |
400 |
Just surfing the web. |
1.2744 |
0.04087 |
164 |
125 |
33 |
6 |
401 |
I misunderstood the term job pool. |
1.2742 |
0.03774 |
186 |
141 |
39 |
6 |
402 |
This is the only place I can get a good WiFi signal. |
1.2737 |
0.03865 |
179 |
136 |
37 |
6 |
403 |
During the pandemic, I became accustomed to not caring what I looked like from the waist down. |
1.2733 |
0.04526 |
150 |
117 |
25 |
8 |
404 |
I'm just getting the hang of remote work. |
1.2733 |
0.03961 |
172 |
131 |
35 |
6 |
405 |
SSH! It’s my Zoom swimsuit. |
1.2711 |
0.04221 |
166 |
129 |
29 |
8 |
406 |
Would you like to participate in a study of obscure humor for The New Yorker magazine? |
1.2706 |
0.04629 |
170 |
138 |
18 |
14 |
407 |
No really, I can work from ANYWHERE |
1.2697 |
0.03946 |
178 |
137 |
34 |
7 |
408 |
I am watching my kids |
1.2695 |
0.04374 |
141 |
108 |
28 |
5 |
409 |
Even remote, you have to dress for success. |
1.2695 |
0.04023 |
167 |
128 |
33 |
6 |
410 |
I work in swimming pool
sales and marketing, so Return-To-Office has really been great. |
1.2690 |
0.03874 |
171 |
130 |
36 |
5 |
411 |
So then I said, 'Listen, Linda, you can make me GO on vacation, but you can't make me BE on vacation.' |
1.2681 |
0.04883 |
138 |
110 |
19 |
9 |
412 |
Our company prides itself on healthy work life balance. |
1.2676 |
0.04571 |
142 |
111 |
24 |
7 |
413 |
They told me to find a talented pool of applicants, but I don’t see how these skills are translatable. |
1.2675 |
0.04553 |
157 |
125 |
22 |
10 |
414 |
Actually, things were going swimmingly until my mouse drowned. |
1.2667 |
0.04310 |
165 |
130 |
26 |
9 |
415 |
No, working remotely has been great - why do you ask? |
1.2663 |
0.04321 |
169 |
134 |
25 |
10 |
416 |
Could I interest you in a drowning policy? |
1.2658 |
0.04345 |
158 |
124 |
26 |
8 |
417 |
This is a side gig. I'm actually a lifeguard. |
1.2654 |
0.04181 |
162 |
126 |
29 |
7 |
418 |
Boss says no more leisure clothes on zoom calls. |
1.2647 |
0.03962 |
170 |
131 |
33 |
6 |
419 |
You stay in YOUR lane! |
1.2643 |
0.04602 |
140 |
110 |
23 |
7 |
420 |
How likely are you to recommend this lane to a friend or family member? |
1.2639 |
0.04725 |
144 |
115 |
20 |
9 |
421 |
Housekeeping is still getting my room ready. |
1.2638 |
0.04336 |
163 |
129 |
25 |
9 |
422 |
It's okay - my virtual background is a beach. |
1.2638 |
0.04066 |
163 |
126 |
31 |
6 |
423 |
I wanted to make more of a splash at work |
1.2635 |
0.04431 |
148 |
116 |
25 |
7 |
424 |
You can't run from an IRS audit forever, Mr. Smith. |
1.2635 |
0.04668 |
167 |
137 |
16 |
14 |
425 |
It doesn't count as work from home if emotionally I'm still in my cubicle. |
1.2634 |
0.04109 |
186 |
148 |
27 |
11 |
426 |
I'm competing in the 100-metre keystroke. |
1.2632 |
0.04112 |
171 |
134 |
29 |
8 |
427 |
It's really hard to get out of a gym membership. |
1.2632 |
0.04451 |
152 |
120 |
24 |
8 |
428 |
Could you please keep it down? I'm in a meeting. |
1.2623 |
0.03929 |
183 |
143 |
32 |
8 |
429 |
casual Friday’s have gone off the deep end |
1.2622 |
0.04136 |
164 |
128 |
29 |
7 |
430 |
Glad I finally caught up with you!
So, now, about that extended car warranty? |
1.2621 |
0.04992 |
145 |
119 |
14 |
12 |
431 |
AND WHAT IS YOUR REASON FOR
UNSUBSCRIBING? |
1.2619 |
0.04406 |
168 |
135 |
22 |
11 |
432 |
What lane were you in when the alleged attack with a pool noodle took place? |
1.2611 |
0.04619 |
180 |
150 |
13 |
17 |
433 |
I'm getting used to how Miami will be in 20 years. |
1.2606 |
0.04545 |
142 |
112 |
23 |
7 |
434 |
You will need scuba gear to learn how much your portfolio is under water. |
1.2604 |
0.04302 |
169 |
135 |
24 |
10 |
435 |
I’ve taken the standing desk to the next level |
1.2603 |
0.04667 |
146 |
117 |
20 |
9 |
436 |
It's an immersion course - I thought I'd dive right in. |
1.2600 |
0.04863 |
150 |
123 |
15 |
12 |
437 |
Nobody can tell because the background is blurred |
1.2599 |
0.03927 |
177 |
138 |
32 |
7 |
438 |
Stay in your lane, Hal. |
1.2598 |
0.05149 |
127 |
103 |
15 |
9 |
439 |
Well, wise guy, it beats the carpool I tried last week! |
1.2597 |
0.04680 |
154 |
125 |
18 |
11 |
440 |
My therapist said I should start exercising |
1.2595 |
0.04323 |
158 |
125 |
25 |
8 |
441 |
I decided to get into the office pool. |
1.2590 |
0.04351 |
166 |
133 |
23 |
10 |
442 |
My therapist told me I’ve been spending too much time at the office. |
1.2590 |
0.04605 |
139 |
110 |
22 |
7 |
443 |
I'm a pool reporter. |
1.2586 |
0.04049 |
174 |
137 |
29 |
8 |
444 |
Technically, I'm working from home. |
1.2586 |
0.04049 |
174 |
137 |
29 |
8 |
445 |
As your attorney I advise you to say, "Polo." |
1.2585 |
0.04537 |
147 |
117 |
22 |
8 |
446 |
My wife thinks I’m a workaholic, so I surprised her with this vacation. |
1.2583 |
0.04834 |
151 |
124 |
15 |
12 |
447 |
Practicing my key strokes |
1.2581 |
0.04374 |
155 |
123 |
24 |
8 |
448 |
It reminds me that I'm not really drowning. |
1.2578 |
0.04331 |
128 |
98 |
27 |
3 |
449 |
They think it’s a green screen |
1.2568 |
0.04406 |
148 |
117 |
24 |
7 |
450 |
Zoom interview. The Y has great wifi. |
1.2566 |
0.04620 |
152 |
123 |
19 |
10 |
451 |
What? Go around. |
1.2560 |
0.05194 |
125 |
102 |
14 |
9 |
452 |
I work for Marco & Polo, attorneys at law, and I’m here to interview the jury pool |
1.2558 |
0.04832 |
129 |
103 |
19 |
7 |
453 |
Sorry, but the board denied your cannonball request. |
1.2558 |
0.04154 |
172 |
137 |
26 |
9 |
454 |
It was closer than the restroom. |
1.2555 |
0.04637 |
137 |
109 |
21 |
7 |
455 |
Are you waiving your right to CPR? |
1.2553 |
0.04657 |
141 |
113 |
20 |
8 |
456 |
I forgot to set my out of office. |
1.2553 |
0.04318 |
141 |
110 |
26 |
5 |
457 |
From 9 to 5,this is the laptop lane for the Typing Pool. |
1.2549 |
0.04402 |
153 |
122 |
23 |
8 |
458 |
And Tolstoy wrote in the sauna. Is this so different? |
1.2548 |
0.04229 |
157 |
124 |
26 |
7 |
459 |
My boss warned us not to wear Speedos when we’re on Zoom. |
1.2534 |
0.04539 |
146 |
117 |
21 |
8 |
460 |
I’m afraid it’s also your portfolio that’s underwater. |
1.2533 |
0.04250 |
150 |
118 |
26 |
6 |
461 |
I know we’re not supposed to ask you to work during off hours, but it would be really great if you could help us out with a few things. |
1.2531 |
0.03848 |
162 |
125 |
33 |
4 |
462 |
It’s all about work-life balance. |
1.2520 |
0.04703 |
123 |
97 |
21 |
5 |
463 |
Is she looking? |
1.2518 |
0.04577 |
139 |
111 |
21 |
7 |
464 |
They say a good work and life balance is key to reducing stress levels |
1.2518 |
0.04907 |
139 |
114 |
15 |
10 |
465 |
We have a flexible work policy. Now I can be miserable anywhere. |
1.2517 |
0.04512 |
147 |
118 |
21 |
8 |
466 |
My clients really value liquidity in their positions. |
1.2517 |
0.04719 |
151 |
124 |
16 |
11 |
467 |
Work from home is so 2020. |
1.2516 |
0.04154 |
155 |
122 |
27 |
6 |
468 |
I'm bringing back the typing pool. |
1.2516 |
0.04631 |
155 |
127 |
17 |
11 |
469 |
Ever since Covid, I’ve discovered I can work anywhere. |
1.2515 |
0.03866 |
167 |
130 |
32 |
5 |
470 |
I deal in liquid assets. |
1.2500 |
0.04078 |
132 |
101 |
29 |
2 |
471 |
I forgot it was casual Friday. |
1.2500 |
0.04501 |
152 |
123 |
20 |
9 |
472 |
If you came into the office, we wouldn't have to do this. |
1.2500 |
0.04660 |
140 |
113 |
19 |
8 |
473 |
We can deduct the swim trunks, but not the flippers. |
1.2500 |
0.04638 |
136 |
109 |
20 |
7 |
474 |
Didn't you get the memo? |
1.2500 |
0.04397 |
136 |
107 |
24 |
5 |
475 |
Standing desks just weren't doing it for me |
1.2484 |
0.03965 |
153 |
119 |
30 |
4 |
476 |
My supervisor's interpretation of "working vacation" conflicted with mine. |
1.2483 |
0.04656 |
149 |
122 |
17 |
10 |
477 |
I know I’m wearing a wet suit. Where’s yours? |
1.2483 |
0.04753 |
149 |
123 |
15 |
11 |
478 |
This IS how I relax. |
1.2483 |
0.04646 |
145 |
118 |
18 |
9 |
479 |
For an extra $10 a month, I can add drowning to your life insurance policy. |
1.2481 |
0.04579 |
133 |
106 |
21 |
6 |
480 |
My analyst says I need to relax. I say I need to multi-task. |
1.2481 |
0.04453 |
133 |
105 |
23 |
5 |
481 |
Excuse me, I'm in a meeting! |
1.2481 |
0.04702 |
133 |
107 |
19 |
7 |
482 |
It's my last Zoom call, then I can take off the shirt and tie. |
1.2471 |
0.04156 |
170 |
137 |
24 |
9 |
483 |
'' I'm torn between my philosophic understanding of the Myth of Sisyphus by Camus and my Trivago vacation hotel discount"
Kevin J. Doran M.A.
38 Lowe Avenue , Fair Lawn, N.J. 07410 |
1.2468 |
0.04725 |
158 |
132 |
13 |
13 |
484 |
I gave up surfing in the ocean. |
1.2468 |
0.03605 |
154 |
117 |
36 |
1 |
485 |
The best way to get your taxes done is to just dive right in. |
1.2467 |
0.04910 |
150 |
126 |
11 |
13 |
486 |
We may be able to float you a loan |
1.2465 |
0.04378 |
142 |
113 |
23 |
6 |
487 |
Ok. Now you can deduct your pool membership. |
1.2463 |
0.04424 |
134 |
106 |
23 |
5 |
488 |
This way, I can write off my pool membership. |
1.2463 |
0.04670 |
134 |
108 |
19 |
7 |
489 |
It's an immersion course. |
1.2462 |
0.04511 |
130 |
103 |
22 |
5 |
490 |
Okay, you're covered for accidental drowning. |
1.2460 |
0.04319 |
126 |
98 |
25 |
3 |
491 |
You say Marco, I say Portfolio. |
1.2460 |
0.04603 |
126 |
100 |
21 |
5 |
492 |
Remote pool party for the office |
1.2455 |
0.03935 |
167 |
132 |
29 |
6 |
493 |
I had to dress for a ZOOM meeting. |
1.2453 |
0.04253 |
159 |
128 |
23 |
8 |
494 |
With climate change, you can now write off swimming. |
1.2450 |
0.04303 |
151 |
121 |
23 |
7 |
495 |
We wear business attire when working remotely. |
1.2449 |
0.04486 |
147 |
119 |
20 |
8 |
496 |
How would you rate your experience today? |
1.2449 |
0.04162 |
147 |
116 |
26 |
5 |
497 |
They placed a last minute meeting on my calendar, can you believe it? |
1.2446 |
0.04064 |
139 |
108 |
28 |
3 |
498 |
I promised my boss this presentation would make a big splash. |
1.2444 |
0.04394 |
135 |
107 |
23 |
5 |
499 |
Yes, I work here. |
1.2443 |
0.04609 |
131 |
105 |
20 |
6 |
500 |
I’m augmenting my reality. |
1.2441 |
0.04571 |
127 |
101 |
21 |
5 |
501 |
I’m American. |
1.2431 |
0.04648 |
144 |
118 |
17 |
9 |
502 |
I can never make those virtual backgrounds work. |
1.2429 |
0.04848 |
140 |
116 |
14 |
10 |
503 |
is it spelled Feb-uary or Feb-ruary? |
1.2429 |
0.04039 |
140 |
109 |
28 |
3 |
504 |
My wife got time off, but I didn't. |
1.2426 |
0.04239 |
136 |
107 |
25 |
4 |
505 |
This is my first time in an office pool, how do you win? |
1.2422 |
0.04673 |
128 |
103 |
19 |
6 |
506 |
The job opening had a strong pool of candidates |
1.2418 |
0.03937 |
153 |
120 |
29 |
4 |
507 |
I like to combine work and play on hot summer days like today. |
1.2414 |
0.04068 |
145 |
114 |
27 |
4 |
508 |
It's all about work-life balance. There's no way I was going to miss another family vacation. |
1.2414 |
0.04184 |
145 |
115 |
25 |
5 |
509 |
According to my reports, this company’s going off the deep end. |
1.2409 |
0.04694 |
137 |
112 |
17 |
8 |
510 |
Oh yes, I am a corporate shark. |
1.2406 |
0.04547 |
133 |
107 |
20 |
6 |
511 |
I'm live-streaming. |
1.2406 |
0.04547 |
133 |
107 |
20 |
6 |
512 |
I’m sorry sir but you can contact our lifeguard only by email. |
1.2406 |
0.04791 |
133 |
109 |
16 |
8 |
513 |
Why, yes! I’m the pool reporter for the New York Times. Why do you ask? |
1.2403 |
0.04769 |
129 |
105 |
17 |
7 |
514 |
I want to play but I just can't. |
1.2403 |
0.04640 |
129 |
104 |
19 |
6 |
515 |
One to ten, how would you rate our pool experience? |
1.2400 |
0.04197 |
150 |
120 |
24 |
6 |
516 |
No, this is my first time. |
1.2397 |
0.04043 |
146 |
115 |
27 |
4 |
517 |
I now realize she said "a couple of laps," but I swear I heard "a couple of apps." |
1.2394 |
0.04348 |
142 |
114 |
22 |
6 |
518 |
Actually, I’m trying to remain cool though this final interview! |
1.2391 |
0.04548 |
138 |
112 |
19 |
7 |
519 |
We have teleworking, but not business casual. |
1.2391 |
0.04548 |
138 |
112 |
19 |
7 |
520 |
Still adjusting to this hybrid office thing |
1.2391 |
0.04548 |
138 |
112 |
19 |
7 |
521 |
I’d rather surf than swim |
1.2388 |
0.04517 |
134 |
108 |
20 |
6 |
522 |
I’m the ‘have no life’ guard. |
1.2385 |
0.04341 |
130 |
103 |
23 |
4 |
523 |
I’m drunk. |
1.2381 |
0.04459 |
147 |
120 |
19 |
8 |
524 |
I call it the keystroke. |
1.2377 |
0.04363 |
122 |
96 |
23 |
3 |
525 |
I'm testing the liquid assets |
1.2375 |
0.04205 |
160 |
130 |
22 |
8 |
526 |
Yes, I manage the office pool. |
1.2372 |
0.04372 |
156 |
128 |
19 |
9 |
527 |
Just talk with me five minutes....and you can deduct the whole vacation! |
1.2370 |
0.04487 |
135 |
109 |
20 |
6 |
528 |
It’s called multitasking. |
1.2370 |
0.04727 |
135 |
111 |
16 |
8 |
529 |
You do laps, I do laptop. |
1.2370 |
0.04487 |
135 |
109 |
20 |
6 |
530 |
I'm reporting her to H.R. You can't splash like that. |
1.2366 |
0.04446 |
131 |
105 |
21 |
5 |
531 |
So you said Speedo.com,right? |
1.2365 |
0.04534 |
148 |
122 |
17 |
9 |
532 |
Only half my investments are underwater at this time. |
1.2365 |
0.04326 |
148 |
120 |
21 |
7 |
533 |
I get more work done here, and I stay cooler. |
1.2362 |
0.04931 |
127 |
105 |
14 |
8 |
534 |
Don't tell my boss; he thinks I'm in over my head. |
1.2361 |
0.04515 |
144 |
118 |
18 |
8 |
535 |
Hey Frank, when you said you wanted to ‘test the waters’ with your new client, you didn’t mean it literally right?
-Sadhvi Abayanayake- |
1.2360 |
0.04622 |
161 |
136 |
12 |
13 |
536 |
Glad I caught you. Just a word about your car’s extended warranty. |
1.2360 |
0.04537 |
161 |
135 |
14 |
12 |
537 |
Well, Fred, you asked me to stay in my own lane, so here I am. |
1.2358 |
0.04909 |
123 |
101 |
15 |
7 |
538 |
My best ideas float to the top. |
1.2358 |
0.04483 |
123 |
98 |
21 |
4 |
539 |
I get that question a lot |
1.2358 |
0.04771 |
123 |
100 |
17 |
6 |
540 |
I really mean it when I say I’ll do anything to get the job. |
1.2357 |
0.04254 |
140 |
112 |
23 |
5 |
541 |
I work for Interpol. |
1.2357 |
0.04489 |
140 |
114 |
19 |
7 |
542 |
What? My therapist said I needed a better work/life balance! |
1.2357 |
0.04602 |
140 |
115 |
17 |
8 |
543 |
This is adult swim Tod, and real adults have jobs. |
1.2353 |
0.05162 |
119 |
99 |
12 |
8 |
544 |
After last night, they insist that i wear a suit in the pool. |
1.2353 |
0.04457 |
136 |
110 |
20 |
6 |
545 |
My Speedo is in the wash. |
1.2353 |
0.03797 |
136 |
105 |
30 |
1 |
546 |
I can take your towel order. |
1.2353 |
0.04577 |
136 |
111 |
18 |
7 |
547 |
Just logging in my laps. |
1.2348 |
0.04146 |
132 |
104 |
25 |
3 |
548 |
I thought the sign said 'Audit Swim.' |
1.2348 |
0.04670 |
132 |
108 |
17 |
7 |
549 |
How would you rate your experience today in our pool? |
1.2344 |
0.04365 |
128 |
102 |
22 |
4 |
550 |
I'm beta-testing standing desk alternatives. It's going swimmingly. |
1.2344 |
0.04073 |
128 |
100 |
26 |
2 |
551 |
This is my favorite day-trading spot. Right in front of the jet. |
1.2340 |
0.04227 |
141 |
113 |
23 |
5 |
552 |
It’s technically a standing desk. |
1.2339 |
0.04301 |
124 |
98 |
23 |
3 |
553 |
My version of "You can have it all". |
1.2336 |
0.04664 |
137 |
113 |
16 |
8 |
554 |
It's called the 'keystroke.' |
1.2336 |
0.04664 |
137 |
113 |
16 |
8 |
555 |
The swim-up bar was a trap. |
1.2336 |
0.04305 |
137 |
110 |
22 |
5 |
556 |
The key to success is liquidity. |
1.2331 |
0.04254 |
133 |
106 |
23 |
4 |
557 |
It's true, I am just treading water at work |
1.2329 |
0.04351 |
146 |
119 |
20 |
7 |
558 |
I'm Googling how to swim. |
1.2326 |
0.04335 |
129 |
103 |
22 |
4 |
559 |
After years of swimming with the sharks, I wanted a slower pace. |
1.2326 |
0.04472 |
129 |
104 |
20 |
5 |
560 |
I'm writing a biography of
Mark Spitz. |
1.2324 |
0.04318 |
142 |
115 |
21 |
6 |
561 |
I'm still not convinced this is your home office. |
1.2321 |
0.04390 |
112 |
88 |
22 |
2 |
562 |
And this is when you noticed your swim trunks were missing? |
1.2319 |
0.04517 |
138 |
113 |
18 |
7 |
563 |
Can I float something by you? |
1.2319 |
0.04517 |
138 |
113 |
18 |
7 |
564 |
Do you know how to change my background on zoom |
1.2319 |
0.04517 |
138 |
113 |
18 |
7 |
565 |
Yes, I'm the Manager. |
1.2313 |
0.04357 |
134 |
108 |
21 |
5 |
566 |
Please go away. I'm trying to do my business. |
1.2313 |
0.04215 |
147 |
119 |
22 |
6 |
567 |
My doctor said I should work out in the pool. |
1.2308 |
0.04441 |
130 |
105 |
20 |
5 |
568 |
I was never fond of Casual Fridays |
1.2303 |
0.04425 |
152 |
126 |
17 |
9 |
569 |
My wife is a slut |
1.2302 |
0.04824 |
139 |
117 |
12 |
10 |
570 |
They're wash and wear |
1.2302 |
0.04241 |
126 |
100 |
23 |
3 |
571 |
I just can't focus when the wife and kids are at home. |
1.2301 |
0.04534 |
113 |
90 |
20 |
3 |
572 |
A jacket just seemed too much. |
1.2295 |
0.04769 |
122 |
100 |
16 |
6 |
573 |
I’m practicing for the free style event. |
1.2295 |
0.04322 |
122 |
97 |
22 |
3 |
574 |
You need to tread lightly. |
1.2294 |
0.04813 |
109 |
88 |
17 |
4 |
575 |
What better place to surf the Net? |
1.2294 |
0.04446 |
109 |
86 |
21 |
2 |
576 |
It’s called a floating holiday for a reason |
1.2294 |
0.04986 |
109 |
89 |
15 |
5 |
577 |
Do you have a funny caption for a comic illustrating this exact situation? |
1.2293 |
0.04415 |
157 |
131 |
16 |
10 |
578 |
Remote work is awesome. You don't have to wear pants. |
1.2292 |
0.04486 |
144 |
119 |
17 |
8 |
579 |
I love casual Fridays! |
1.2290 |
0.04275 |
131 |
105 |
22 |
4 |
580 |
Perfecting my keystroke. |
1.2286 |
0.03839 |
140 |
110 |
28 |
2 |
581 |
I find myself far more productive in the shallow end. |
1.2286 |
0.04459 |
140 |
115 |
18 |
7 |
582 |
My best event? The keystroke. |
1.2283 |
0.04060 |
127 |
100 |
25 |
2 |
583 |
No, you can’t use this meeting to write off your pool as an office expense. |
1.2283 |
0.04211 |
127 |
101 |
23 |
3 |
584 |
Do you know how to filter a background? |
1.2279 |
0.04299 |
136 |
110 |
21 |
5 |
585 |
I was told to pool my resources. |
1.2276 |
0.04291 |
123 |
98 |
22 |
3 |
586 |
Finally getting my Summer Friday, Jim! What’s the wifi password here? |
1.2276 |
0.04734 |
123 |
101 |
16 |
6 |
587 |
I'm the local pool reporter. |
1.2276 |
0.04237 |
145 |
118 |
21 |
6 |
588 |
I am installing the CHAT-GPT lifeguard. |
1.2276 |
0.04349 |
145 |
119 |
19 |
7 |
589 |
Your portfolio limits you to the shallow end of the pool. |
1.2273 |
0.04372 |
154 |
128 |
17 |
9 |
590 |
Would you rate the urine content Poor, Just Okay, Favorable or Ideal? |
1.2273 |
0.04246 |
132 |
106 |
22 |
4 |
591 |
I meant my assistant Marco. |
1.2273 |
0.04381 |
132 |
107 |
20 |
5 |
592 |
... because the writer's manual specifically said .. "immerse yourself in the story..." |
1.2273 |
0.04637 |
132 |
109 |
16 |
7 |
593 |
Would you say the water is too warm,too cold or just right? |
1.2273 |
0.04773 |
110 |
89 |
17 |
4 |
594 |
I think i can do so much more. I'm just treading water working in IT |
1.2270 |
0.04543 |
141 |
117 |
16 |
8 |
595 |
I'm transitioning into retirement. |
1.2269 |
0.04839 |
119 |
98 |
15 |
6 |
596 |
So the chlorine burned your eyes and irritated your skin, causing pain and suffering, loss of consortium, and irreparable harm—is that right? |
1.2266 |
0.04734 |
128 |
106 |
15 |
7 |
597 |
I've been drowning in email. |
1.2266 |
0.04466 |
128 |
104 |
19 |
5 |
598 |
Unfortunately, all of your investments with us are underwater." |
1.2263 |
0.04633 |
137 |
114 |
15 |
8 |
599 |
I can't wear swim trunks — I look naked on Zoom. |
1.2263 |
0.04395 |
137 |
112 |
19 |
6 |
600 |
I just ordered a bathing suit. Happy now? |
1.2261 |
0.04950 |
115 |
95 |
14 |
6 |
601 |
I’m surfing the internet. |
1.2256 |
0.04351 |
133 |
108 |
20 |
5 |
602 |
It's the best Wi-Fi in the entire hotel. |
1.2256 |
0.04351 |
133 |
108 |
20 |
5 |
603 |
My favorite is the keystroke. |
1.2254 |
0.04287 |
142 |
116 |
20 |
6 |
604 |
Scene one. Exterior. Pool. Day. Now what? |
1.2252 |
0.05069 |
111 |
92 |
13 |
6 |
605 |
My cardiologist said I should spend more time in the pool. |
1.2252 |
0.04375 |
111 |
88 |
21 |
2 |
606 |
Pin striped trunks, if you must know. |
1.2252 |
0.04220 |
151 |
124 |
20 |
7 |
607 |
I simply don't understand why they want me to come back into the office. I'm so much more productive here. |
1.2250 |
0.04654 |
120 |
98 |
17 |
5 |
608 |
What, this isn't a typing pool? |
1.2241 |
0.04596 |
116 |
94 |
18 |
4 |
609 |
The pool of applicants is shallower than I expected |
1.2241 |
0.04756 |
116 |
95 |
16 |
5 |
610 |
I'm a licensed attorney, a part-time lifeguard, and a full-time idiot. |
1.2239 |
0.04449 |
134 |
110 |
18 |
6 |
611 |
When HR said we were hiring from a pool this isn’t quite what I expected. |
1.2239 |
0.04574 |
134 |
111 |
16 |
7 |
612 |
When they said I would be entering into a pool of candidates, this is not what I had in mind. |
1.2239 |
0.04054 |
134 |
107 |
24 |
3 |
613 |
this is work life balance |
1.2238 |
0.04593 |
143 |
120 |
14 |
9 |
614 |
I work as a lifeguard, and selling insurance is my side hustle. |
1.2232 |
0.04696 |
112 |
91 |
17 |
4 |
615 |
Thank you, it's going swimmingly. |
1.2231 |
0.04404 |
130 |
106 |
19 |
5 |
616 |
Liquidity is critical in this market! |
1.2231 |
0.04667 |
130 |
108 |
15 |
7 |
617 |
The more strokes, the better your rate. |
1.2231 |
0.04267 |
130 |
105 |
21 |
4 |
618 |
Your portfolio is also underwater. |
1.2230 |
0.04337 |
139 |
114 |
19 |
6 |
619 |
I'm coming up with 2,610,000,000 results for Marco. |
1.2222 |
0.04631 |
126 |
104 |
16 |
6 |
620 |
Me? No sir, it must be a naturally-occurring warm spot |
1.2222 |
0.04492 |
126 |
103 |
18 |
5 |
621 |
Amazon says my swimsuit should arrive soon |
1.2222 |
0.04419 |
135 |
111 |
18 |
6 |
622 |
It's called immersion theory. |
1.2222 |
0.04620 |
108 |
87 |
18 |
3 |
623 |
And you suspect the stolen article of clothing is still in the pool? |
1.2222 |
0.05166 |
117 |
99 |
10 |
8 |
624 |
Just because there's no lifeguard on duty, doesn't mean there's no accountant on duty. |
1.2222 |
0.04560 |
117 |
95 |
18 |
4 |
625 |
It’s my new Treadwater desk. |
1.2222 |
0.04116 |
144 |
117 |
22 |
5 |
626 |
I'm just trying to stay afloat. |
1.2222 |
0.04665 |
99 |
79 |
18 |
2 |
627 |
They said no bathroom breaks. |
1.2214 |
0.04374 |
131 |
107 |
19 |
5 |
628 |
The dot only stays green if I’m wearing a shirt and tie. |
1.2214 |
0.04097 |
131 |
105 |
23 |
3 |
629 |
I'm doing my laps virtually. |
1.2213 |
0.04730 |
122 |
101 |
15 |
6 |
630 |
I do my best work when I’m hydrated. |
1.2213 |
0.05142 |
122 |
104 |
9 |
9 |
631 |
HR told me I'd lose my vacation time if I didn't take it. |
1.2213 |
0.04730 |
122 |
101 |
15 |
6 |
632 |
As the attorney for the company, I can only advise you to read the fine print next time. You see, THIS is the office pool you have won. |
1.2212 |
0.04306 |
113 |
90 |
21 |
2 |
633 |
We’re testing the waters with our new app. Want to try? |
1.2212 |
0.04986 |
113 |
94 |
13 |
6 |
634 |
My counselor told me to balance work with recreation |
1.2212 |
0.04659 |
113 |
92 |
17 |
4 |
635 |
No, I am not in hot water |
1.2212 |
0.04659 |
113 |
92 |
17 |
4 |
636 |
I’ve used all my vacation days. |
1.2205 |
0.04460 |
127 |
104 |
18 |
5 |
637 |
When I interviewed for the job, they told me I’d be swimming in emails, but I honestly didn’t believe them. |
1.2205 |
0.04170 |
127 |
102 |
22 |
3 |
638 |
Would you say your backstroke is better, worse or the same as last week? |
1.2203 |
0.04835 |
118 |
98 |
14 |
6 |
639 |
# “Yes, I am American. What gave it away?” |
1.2200 |
0.04837 |
100 |
81 |
16 |
3 |
640 |
Business in the front, party in the back. |
1.2197 |
0.04069 |
132 |
106 |
23 |
3 |
641 |
I can continue working without taking a bathroom break. |
1.2195 |
0.04551 |
123 |
101 |
17 |
5 |
642 |
Fact is, I write better when I'm half-submerged. |
1.2195 |
0.04088 |
123 |
98 |
23 |
2 |
643 |
I'm not supposed to take my work laptop into the men's room… |
1.2195 |
0.04835 |
123 |
103 |
13 |
7 |
644 |
It's sink or swim in this office pool, Buddy! |
1.2195 |
0.04835 |
123 |
103 |
13 |
7 |
645 |
i'm hearing rumors we're about to go under |
1.2195 |
0.04248 |
123 |
99 |
21 |
3 |
646 |
And people think working from home is fun. |
1.2195 |
0.04248 |
123 |
99 |
21 |
3 |
647 |
The swimming desk is the new standing desk |
1.2195 |
0.04402 |
123 |
100 |
19 |
4 |
648 |
Wet Suit? Real original. |
1.2193 |
0.04451 |
114 |
92 |
19 |
3 |
649 |
The name's Poole. |
1.2193 |
0.04946 |
114 |
95 |
13 |
6 |
650 |
Until I have sufficient data on the effects of frog ass on bare skin, I shant be undressing - who knows how many frog asses this water has come in contact with! |
1.2192 |
0.04810 |
146 |
126 |
8 |
12 |
651 |
You should see how I make love. |
1.2190 |
0.05060 |
105 |
87 |
13 |
5 |
652 |
My wife thinks I'm at the office, and the office thinks I'm working from home. |
1.2190 |
0.05060 |
105 |
87 |
13 |
5 |
653 |
So, how many wetsuits shall I put you down for? |
1.2190 |
0.04236 |
137 |
112 |
20 |
5 |
654 |
I just blur the background. |
1.2188 |
0.04287 |
128 |
104 |
20 |
4 |
655 |
I am in the typing pool. |
1.2188 |
0.04428 |
128 |
105 |
18 |
5 |
656 |
On a scale of 1 - 10 how satisfied are you with the water temperature - with 1 being not satisfied and 10 being very satisfied. |
1.2188 |
0.04287 |
128 |
104 |
20 |
4 |
657 |
We’re working on improving our liquidity. |
1.2185 |
0.04647 |
119 |
98 |
16 |
5 |
658 |
This is my bathing suit. |
1.2182 |
0.05065 |
110 |
92 |
12 |
6 |
659 |
This way I don’t have to take bathroom breaks. |
1.2178 |
0.05559 |
101 |
86 |
8 |
7 |
660 |
Yes, I'm in a meeting. I just blur the background. |
1.2177 |
0.04517 |
124 |
102 |
17 |
5 |
661 |
And finally, how would you rate your overall swimming experience at the pool today? |
1.2177 |
0.04799 |
124 |
104 |
13 |
7 |
662 |
So, she dunked you three times with no provocation? |
1.2174 |
0.04585 |
115 |
94 |
17 |
4 |
663 |
Family time billing. Everybody wins. |
1.2174 |
0.04208 |
138 |
113 |
20 |
5 |
664 |
And I don't even need bathroom breaks. |
1.2171 |
0.04112 |
129 |
104 |
22 |
3 |
665 |
I placed first in the 100m keystroke. |
1.2170 |
0.04834 |
106 |
87 |
15 |
4 |
666 |
I'd like to float a few ideas by you. |
1.2170 |
0.04834 |
106 |
87 |
15 |
4 |
667 |
. "What can I say? WFH is evolving." |
1.2170 |
0.04834 |
106 |
87 |
15 |
4 |
668 |
I like to immerse myself in my work. |
1.2167 |
0.04457 |
120 |
98 |
18 |
4 |
669 |
Like a duck, I seem cool and collective on the exterior but under the surface I'm paddling like hell. |
1.2167 |
0.04761 |
120 |
100 |
14 |
6 |
670 |
So what makes you stand out from the pool of applicants? |
1.2167 |
0.04761 |
120 |
100 |
14 |
6 |
671 |
Did you see my earbud down there? |
1.2167 |
0.04297 |
120 |
97 |
20 |
3 |
672 |
I'm doing the keystroke. |
1.2160 |
0.04338 |
125 |
102 |
19 |
4 |
673 |
I think there’s been a massive misunderstanding of the term “bathing suit.” |
1.2160 |
0.04626 |
125 |
104 |
15 |
6 |
674 |
I've been trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty. |
1.2158 |
0.04539 |
139 |
117 |
14 |
8 |
675 |
Where do you see yourself in five laps? |
1.2157 |
0.04542 |
102 |
82 |
18 |
2 |
676 |
Would you say; A. Wet B. Somewhat Wet or C. Not Wet at all. |
1.2157 |
0.04951 |
102 |
84 |
14 |
4 |
677 |
I guess I misunderstood what being a "Pool Reporter" for the New Yorker meant. |
1.2157 |
0.05144 |
102 |
85 |
12 |
5 |
678 |
I want to test the water before jumping in. |
1.2155 |
0.04550 |
116 |
95 |
17 |
4 |
679 |
I started as a pool boy and came up through the ranks. |
1.2155 |
0.04711 |
116 |
96 |
15 |
5 |
680 |
Sorry, cant you see I’m waist deep in work right now? |
1.2155 |
0.04868 |
116 |
97 |
13 |
6 |
681 |
Working remotely isn't all it's cracked up to be, especially if you have kids. |
1.2154 |
0.04501 |
130 |
108 |
16 |
6 |
682 |
Remember when we'd just gather around a water cooler? |
1.2150 |
0.04793 |
107 |
88 |
15 |
4 |
683 |
I have a desk treadmill, but this is easier on my joints. |
1.2149 |
0.04577 |
121 |
100 |
16 |
5 |
684 |
Hi, I’m Greg, and I’ve been trying to reach you regarding your car’s extended warranty. Please provide your social security number, credit card information, and drivers license number on this screen here. |
1.2149 |
0.04868 |
121 |
102 |
12 |
7 |
685 |
Yeah, I’m hybrid. |
1.2149 |
0.04725 |
121 |
101 |
14 |
6 |
686 |
I don’t think this is what they meant when they said you could work from anywhere |
1.2148 |
0.03988 |
135 |
109 |
23 |
3 |
687 |
I just come for the adult swim. |
1.2143 |
0.04818 |
112 |
93 |
14 |
5 |
688 |
I just needed to pee. |
1.2143 |
0.04982 |
112 |
94 |
12 |
6 |
689 |
I'm in charge of liquidations. |
1.2143 |
0.04982 |
112 |
94 |
12 |
6 |
690 |
This counts for my employer's exercise program. |
1.2143 |
0.03564 |
154 |
123 |
29 |
2 |
691 |
I'm just getting my feet wet. |
1.2143 |
0.04648 |
112 |
92 |
16 |
4 |
692 |
Technically, I'm on a working vacation. |
1.2138 |
0.04174 |
145 |
120 |
19 |
6 |
693 |
Gotta love the blurry background feature on Zoom, eh? |
1.2137 |
0.04830 |
117 |
98 |
13 |
6 |
694 |
My therapist said I have to focus on work-life balance. |
1.2137 |
0.03995 |
117 |
93 |
23 |
1 |
695 |
They denied my vacation request but I already booked my flight. |
1.2132 |
0.04478 |
136 |
114 |
15 |
7 |
696 |
It cuts down on bathroom breaks. |
1.2131 |
0.04831 |
122 |
103 |
12 |
7 |
697 |
Management said they needed me to make a bigger splash at work. |
1.2131 |
0.04391 |
122 |
100 |
18 |
4 |
698 |
Let's talk liquidity. |
1.2130 |
0.04753 |
108 |
89 |
15 |
4 |
699 |
Hey pal, looks like I’m going to have to write you up for possessing one of the most beautiful nipples I’ve ever seen. |
1.2130 |
0.05271 |
108 |
92 |
9 |
7 |
700 |
I forgot my swim trunks. |
1.2128 |
0.04987 |
94 |
77 |
14 |
3 |
701 |
Can’t you see I’m trying to work! |
1.2128 |
0.05212 |
94 |
78 |
12 |
4 |
702 |
Tax season is always sink or swim. |
1.2126 |
0.04420 |
127 |
105 |
17 |
5 |
703 |
Suit,swim and surf the net. |
1.2124 |
0.04064 |
113 |
90 |
22 |
1 |
704 |
I’m from the IRS and I’m here to help you. |
1.2121 |
0.04306 |
132 |
109 |
18 |
5 |
705 |
Is this not the typing pool? |
1.2121 |
0.04438 |
132 |
110 |
16 |
6 |
706 |
I'm preparing for the climate crisis |
1.2121 |
0.04306 |
132 |
109 |
18 |
5 |
707 |
I can't afford a standing desk. |
1.2119 |
0.04638 |
118 |
98 |
15 |
5 |
708 |
Maybe they said "pool our resources" instead of "putting our resources in the pool." |
1.2119 |
0.04792 |
118 |
99 |
13 |
6 |
709 |
No, not those liquid assets. |
1.2119 |
0.03965 |
118 |
94 |
23 |
1 |
710 |
Can you move? I’m on a Zoom call. |
1.2119 |
0.04315 |
118 |
96 |
19 |
3 |
711 |
Just completing the public pool urination report. |
1.2119 |
0.04792 |
118 |
99 |
13 |
6 |
712 |
Yes well, Roger, when they said adult swim, I just assumed they meant… |
1.2117 |
0.04200 |
137 |
113 |
19 |
5 |
713 |
Whatever it takes to keep the business afloat. |
1.2117 |
0.04326 |
137 |
114 |
17 |
6 |
714 |
Just pooling my results. |
1.2115 |
0.05053 |
104 |
87 |
12 |
5 |
715 |
They threw all the new-hires in the deep end. |
1.2115 |
0.04864 |
104 |
86 |
14 |
4 |
716 |
I wanted to be found well. |
1.2114 |
0.03873 |
123 |
98 |
24 |
1 |
717 |
So when do you think you Will be ready to sell your house? |
1.2114 |
0.04509 |
123 |
102 |
16 |
5 |
718 |
My work is going swimmingly. |
1.2114 |
0.04203 |
123 |
100 |
20 |
3 |
719 |
I take remote work seriously. |
1.2114 |
0.04509 |
123 |
102 |
16 |
5 |
720 |
Year end. It’s sink or swim. |
1.2114 |
0.04203 |
123 |
100 |
20 |
3 |
721 |
Doctor says I need to get outside more. |
1.2109 |
0.04246 |
128 |
105 |
19 |
4 |
722 |
My idiot boss told me to try Amphibial Intelligence. |
1.2109 |
0.04388 |
128 |
106 |
17 |
5 |
723 |
They say the best way to hire candidates is to observe them in everyday life. So where do you see yourself in five years? |
1.2109 |
0.04098 |
128 |
104 |
21 |
3 |
724 |
Surfing the web. |
1.2105 |
0.04574 |
114 |
94 |
16 |
4 |
725 |
And when did you first notice that sinking feeling? |
1.2105 |
0.04574 |
114 |
94 |
16 |
4 |
726 |
Oh sorry, is this not the typing pool? |
1.2105 |
0.04401 |
114 |
93 |
18 |
3 |
727 |
You can lead a bureaucrat to water, but you can't make him swim. |
1.2101 |
0.04603 |
119 |
99 |
15 |
5 |
728 |
The AC is out at the office. |
1.2101 |
0.04112 |
119 |
96 |
21 |
2 |
729 |
I always preferred the keystroke. |
1.2101 |
0.04445 |
119 |
98 |
17 |
4 |
730 |
Is overdressed one or two words? |
1.2100 |
0.05374 |
100 |
85 |
9 |
6 |
731 |
Yes I am a consultant. How could you tell? |
1.2100 |
0.05374 |
100 |
85 |
9 |
6 |
732 |
Job interview. |
1.2097 |
0.04475 |
124 |
103 |
16 |
5 |
733 |
Everyone at the office thinks this is my Zoom background! |
1.2097 |
0.04475 |
124 |
103 |
16 |
5 |
734 |
Hey could you dive down there and look for an outlet? |
1.2097 |
0.04620 |
124 |
104 |
14 |
6 |
735 |
Don't mind me. I'm just here to remind you that you can't swim, and that you don't have life insurance. Also there is no lifeguard on duty. |
1.2095 |
0.05008 |
105 |
88 |
12 |
5 |
736 |
My boss thinks it’s a background. |
1.2095 |
0.05188 |
105 |
89 |
10 |
6 |
737 |
Why yes, I am American. |
1.2091 |
0.04674 |
110 |
91 |
15 |
4 |
738 |
I'm an underwater mortgage specialist. |
1.2091 |
0.04849 |
110 |
92 |
13 |
5 |
739 |
We’ve been trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty. |
1.2091 |
0.05182 |
110 |
94 |
9 |
7 |
740 |
Good news - turns out the water’s only mildly toxic. |
1.2091 |
0.04849 |
110 |
92 |
13 |
5 |
741 |
My boss said we can't work from home anymore. |
1.2087 |
0.04537 |
115 |
95 |
16 |
4 |
742 |
I've been trying to contact you about your car warranty. |
1.2087 |
0.04366 |
115 |
94 |
18 |
3 |
743 |
I’m training the remote lifeguard. |
1.2087 |
0.04188 |
115 |
93 |
20 |
2 |
744 |
Next time we meet at MY office. |
1.2087 |
0.04862 |
115 |
97 |
12 |
6 |
745 |
We are the number one life guard recruiting company. |
1.2083 |
0.04250 |
120 |
98 |
19 |
3 |
746 |
Do you know the Guest Wi-Fi password? |
1.2083 |
0.05322 |
96 |
81 |
10 |
5 |
747 |
The invitation said bring a suit for the pool. |
1.2083 |
0.04250 |
120 |
98 |
19 |
3 |
748 |
What? My company said we can work-from-anywhere. |
1.2083 |
0.04865 |
120 |
102 |
11 |
7 |
749 |
I am surveying the voter pool. |
1.2080 |
0.04586 |
125 |
105 |
14 |
6 |
750 |
Easiest way to get skinny leg pants. |
1.2080 |
0.04443 |
125 |
104 |
16 |
5 |
751 |
Yes, we can play mermaids. Just give me one more minute. |
1.2080 |
0.04586 |
125 |
105 |
14 |
6 |
752 |
The IRS code specifically states that if I want to take this as a home office deduction, I must actually work here” |
1.2079 |
0.05135 |
101 |
85 |
11 |
5 |
753 |
See, I can be fun! |
1.2079 |
0.04734 |
101 |
83 |
15 |
3 |
754 |
It's a working vacation |
1.2075 |
0.04179 |
106 |
85 |
20 |
1 |
755 |
Any idea how to blur a Zoom background? |
1.2075 |
0.04965 |
106 |
89 |
12 |
5 |
756 |
Don’t worry, I’m not wearing pants |
1.2075 |
0.05143 |
106 |
90 |
10 |
6 |
757 |
I'm trying to balance my work/life routine! |
1.2072 |
0.04267 |
111 |
90 |
19 |
2 |
758 |
No, you are swimming in my investment pool. |
1.2072 |
0.04267 |
111 |
90 |
19 |
2 |
759 |
I’m training for the rat race triathalon |
1.2072 |
0.04809 |
111 |
93 |
13 |
5 |
760 |
Move over to the next lane, can’t you see I’m busy?” |
1.2069 |
0.04665 |
116 |
97 |
14 |
5 |
761 |
I’m tracking my liquid assets. |
1.2069 |
0.04502 |
116 |
96 |
16 |
4 |
762 |
I've maximized my work output since I've
been working from pool |
1.2066 |
0.04218 |
121 |
99 |
19 |
3 |
763 |
I was hoping to take our walking meetings to the next level. |
1.2066 |
0.03878 |
121 |
97 |
23 |
1 |
764 |
Last week I was totally underwater. |
1.2065 |
0.04773 |
92 |
75 |
15 |
2 |
765 |
I’m John and I’m here to renew your health club membership. |
1.2063 |
0.04410 |
126 |
105 |
16 |
5 |
766 |
Well, I didn't want to be caught on Zoom wearing swim trunks. |
1.2063 |
0.04552 |
126 |
106 |
14 |
6 |
767 |
I'm part of the typing pool. |
1.2062 |
0.04847 |
97 |
80 |
14 |
3 |
768 |
Mr. Soggypants is my dad. Call me Wade. |
1.2059 |
0.03780 |
136 |
110 |
24 |
2 |
769 |
I like to meet my clients where they are. |
1.2059 |
0.04480 |
102 |
83 |
17 |
2 |
770 |
Sure, Americans get 5 paid weeks holiday too. |
1.2059 |
0.04692 |
102 |
84 |
15 |
3 |
771 |
It's not easy being a Mer-man in today's economy. |
1.2059 |
0.04894 |
102 |
85 |
13 |
4 |
772 |
They told me I couldn't work from home. |
1.2057 |
0.03701 |
141 |
114 |
25 |
2 |
773 |
In your own words, please tell me why you're most suited for this role out of this pool of candidates? |
1.2056 |
0.05098 |
107 |
91 |
10 |
6 |
774 |
Got sick of working from home. |
1.2056 |
0.05098 |
107 |
91 |
10 |
6 |
775 |
Our bank is committed to bringing our business to you. |
1.2056 |
0.04922 |
107 |
90 |
12 |
5 |
776 |
Hey bud watch the splashing, some of us have work to do. |
1.2054 |
0.04935 |
112 |
95 |
11 |
6 |
777 |
Yes, it's a hybrid position for me. |
1.2054 |
0.04769 |
112 |
94 |
13 |
5 |
778 |
I'm figuring out the whole work/life balance thing. |
1.2054 |
0.04597 |
112 |
93 |
15 |
4 |
779 |
Pooling the company’s resources doesn’t seem to be as effective as we thought. |
1.2054 |
0.04769 |
112 |
94 |
13 |
5 |
780 |
One way to reduce the staff could be to pull the plug |
1.2054 |
0.04935 |
112 |
95 |
11 |
6 |
781 |
I like working remote, but I miss hanging around the water cooler. |
1.2051 |
0.04467 |
117 |
97 |
16 |
4 |
782 |
We’re not under water yet. |
1.2051 |
0.04629 |
117 |
98 |
14 |
5 |
783 |
It's my first time in the office pool. |
1.2051 |
0.04629 |
117 |
98 |
14 |
5 |
784 |
Look, I don't come to your workplace and ask you a ton of questions |
1.2051 |
0.04937 |
117 |
100 |
10 |
7 |
785 |
What’s the problem? I’m in the secretary pool. |
1.2051 |
0.04629 |
117 |
98 |
14 |
5 |
786 |
My office wants us to have work life balance without sacrificing the project load. |
1.2051 |
0.04298 |
117 |
96 |
18 |
3 |
787 |
This is just the break I needed! |
1.2049 |
0.04790 |
122 |
104 |
11 |
7 |
788 |
We can still work remotely but they reinstated the dress code |
1.2049 |
0.04647 |
122 |
103 |
13 |
6 |
789 |
Your message did say, let's meet in the the pool and bring your lap top? |
1.2049 |
0.04499 |
122 |
102 |
15 |
5 |
790 |
and …. did you have anything from the mini bar? |
1.2049 |
0.04647 |
122 |
103 |
13 |
6 |
791 |
Excuse me but do you know the Wi-Fi password? |
1.2041 |
0.05016 |
98 |
82 |
12 |
4 |
792 |
I have swim trunks on. Stop freaking out. |
1.2041 |
0.04802 |
98 |
81 |
14 |
3 |
793 |
We always meet the customer where they are… |
1.2039 |
0.04441 |
103 |
84 |
17 |
2 |
794 |
My productivity has markedly increased because I can pee right here and keep working |
1.2039 |
0.05043 |
103 |
87 |
11 |
5 |
795 |
My boss thinks this is a fake Zoom background. |
1.2037 |
0.04880 |
108 |
91 |
12 |
5 |
796 |
Isn't 3 o'clock "adult laptops time" ? |
1.2037 |
0.04511 |
108 |
89 |
16 |
3 |
797 |
The Polo Family does not give you permission to use his name or facsimile thereof. |
1.2037 |
0.04511 |
108 |
89 |
16 |
3 |
798 |
We now use the gender-neutral term 'mer-person'. |
1.2035 |
0.04730 |
113 |
95 |
13 |
5 |
799 |
On a scale of 1 to 10, how much pee do you think is in this pool? |
1.2035 |
0.04560 |
113 |
94 |
15 |
4 |
800 |
You have to meet the client where they are” |
1.2035 |
0.04894 |
113 |
96 |
11 |
6 |
801 |
I promised my cardiologist. |
1.2034 |
0.04432 |
118 |
98 |
16 |
4 |
802 |
They call it ‘hybrid vacationing’ |
1.2034 |
0.04265 |
118 |
97 |
18 |
3 |
803 |
I'm waterlogging in. |
1.2030 |
0.04100 |
133 |
110 |
19 |
4 |
804 |
I'm trying to find out how to improve my stroke. |
1.2029 |
0.04135 |
138 |
115 |
18 |
5 |
805 |
I'm still looking for my pool password. |
1.2028 |
0.03787 |
143 |
117 |
23 |
3 |
806 |
My hybrid work set-up is very fluid. |
1.2021 |
0.05365 |
94 |
80 |
9 |
5 |
807 |
It's okay. I already put rice in it. |
1.2020 |
0.04758 |
99 |
82 |
14 |
3 |
808 |
I prefer to stay in my lane. |
1.2019 |
0.04609 |
104 |
86 |
15 |
3 |
809 |
Laugh all you want, but this entire vacation, as well as these pants, are now write-offs. |
1.2019 |
0.04998 |
104 |
88 |
11 |
5 |
810 |
Crazy? No, why?? Because I’m not wearing socks? |
1.2019 |
0.05359 |
104 |
90 |
7 |
7 |
811 |
The bathrooms in my building are out of service. |
1.2018 |
0.04474 |
109 |
90 |
16 |
3 |
812 |
Free parking, free wifi, and lunch at the snack bar is less than five bucks. |
1.2018 |
0.05011 |
109 |
93 |
10 |
6 |
813 |
I believe that your bathing suit is deductible. |
1.2018 |
0.04349 |
114 |
94 |
17 |
3 |
814 |
You only qualify if you’re over 65, earn less than 50k and have your own swimming pool. |
1.2018 |
0.04349 |
114 |
94 |
17 |
3 |
815 |
I don't have to stop work to go to the bathroom. |
1.2018 |
0.04855 |
114 |
97 |
11 |
6 |
816 |
Yes, I am an American. How did you know? |
1.2017 |
0.04711 |
119 |
101 |
12 |
6 |
817 |
I used to manage the pool remotely from that building over there. |
1.2017 |
0.04061 |
119 |
97 |
20 |
2 |
818 |
Sorry, can’t talk… this is my downtime. |
1.2017 |
0.04061 |
119 |
97 |
20 |
2 |
819 |
They said they would throw me in the deep end but it’s much shallower than I expected |
1.2017 |
0.04233 |
119 |
98 |
18 |
3 |
820 |
You’ll have the cleanest audit ever. |
1.2016 |
0.04282 |
124 |
103 |
17 |
4 |
821 |
Sorry to break it to you, but your investments are underwater. |
1.2016 |
0.04856 |
124 |
107 |
9 |
8 |
822 |
I was told this was the “adult” swim time. |
1.2016 |
0.04432 |
124 |
104 |
15 |
5 |
823 |
And has it been at least an hour since you ate lunch? |
1.2016 |
0.04173 |
129 |
107 |
18 |
4 |
824 |
So the fertility doc said to keep 'em cool but I can't take off work right now. |
1.2015 |
0.04208 |
134 |
112 |
17 |
5 |
825 |
My new boss keeps the thermostat at 82. |
1.2000 |
0.04637 |
95 |
78 |
15 |
2 |
826 |
Google confirms it’s wash and wear |
1.2000 |
0.04423 |
130 |
110 |
14 |
6 |
827 |
It's an immersive training course. |
1.2000 |
0.04954 |
105 |
89 |
11 |
5 |
828 |
Yes, I am the lifeguard. |
1.2000 |
0.04766 |
105 |
88 |
13 |
4 |
829 |
I am relaxed. |
1.2000 |
0.04364 |
105 |
86 |
17 |
2 |
830 |
It's not the most exciting job but I can work from anywhere. |
1.2000 |
0.04364 |
105 |
86 |
17 |
2 |
831 |
Doesn't matter what I wear down below--I'm on Zoom. |
1.2000 |
0.05312 |
95 |
81 |
9 |
5 |
832 |
Why? Because they kicked me out of the hot tub. That’s why. |
1.2000 |
0.05047 |
90 |
75 |
12 |
3 |
833 |
I needed a good background. |
1.2000 |
0.04495 |
100 |
82 |
16 |
2 |
834 |
You can’t write it off as flood damage. |
1.2000 |
0.04149 |
105 |
85 |
19 |
1 |
835 |
I'm an accountant. This is my bathing suit. |
1.2000 |
0.05047 |
90 |
75 |
12 |
3 |
836 |
My event is the 100 WPM keystroke. |
1.2000 |
0.04569 |
105 |
87 |
15 |
3 |
837 |
I’m guessing you forgot you’d be on camera for your 2:00? |
1.2000 |
0.04250 |
125 |
104 |
17 |
4 |
838 |
The job requires total immersion. |
1.2000 |
0.04954 |
105 |
89 |
11 |
5 |
839 |
I'm getting lots of likes on my new background screen. |
1.2000 |
0.05125 |
100 |
85 |
10 |
5 |
840 |
I know some people in the shallow end; let me put out a few feelers. |
1.2000 |
0.04201 |
120 |
99 |
18 |
3 |
841 |
I was up to my neck with work before. Now I’m just wading for the weekend. |
1.2000 |
0.04954 |
105 |
89 |
11 |
5 |
842 |
I thought this was the typing pool. |
1.2000 |
0.04654 |
115 |
97 |
13 |
5 |
843 |
I miss the office camaraderie. |
1.2000 |
0.04437 |
110 |
91 |
16 |
3 |
844 |
I still miss the steno pool. |
1.2000 |
0.04437 |
110 |
91 |
16 |
3 |
845 |
The job market is competitive, but I pride myself on the professionalism I bring to this applicant pool. |
1.2000 |
0.04654 |
115 |
97 |
13 |
5 |
846 |
I'll get right on that Mr. Musk. |
1.2000 |
0.05097 |
95 |
80 |
11 |
4 |
847 |
They said work from home, but I'm most at home in the water. |
1.2000 |
0.04569 |
105 |
87 |
15 |
3 |
848 |
See, nobody knows, because from here up I’m pretty dry |
1.2000 |
0.04314 |
115 |
95 |
17 |
3 |
849 |
I call it billing and swimming |
1.2000 |
0.04364 |
120 |
100 |
16 |
4 |
850 |
Forget Python, I'm programming in Marco Polo. |
1.1984 |
0.03907 |
126 |
103 |
21 |
2 |
851 |
For Full Life you’ll need to undergo a physical |
1.1983 |
0.04331 |
121 |
101 |
16 |
4 |
852 |
The boss told me to send an email from the office pool.” |
1.1983 |
0.04487 |
121 |
102 |
14 |
5 |
853 |
I’m afraid all of your assets are underwater. |
1.1983 |
0.04452 |
116 |
97 |
15 |
4 |
854 |
It’s called “paid time away” |
1.1983 |
0.04452 |
116 |
97 |
15 |
4 |
855 |
Work-life balance is a process. |
1.1982 |
0.04400 |
111 |
92 |
16 |
3 |
856 |
My boss told me to test the waters." |
1.1982 |
0.03801 |
111 |
89 |
22 |
0 |
857 |
I’m about be in a zoom meeting. Can you get everyone to stop splashing? |
1.1982 |
0.04582 |
111 |
93 |
14 |
4 |
858 |
The great thing about working remote is that you can leave your bathing shorts on even during video calls. |
1.1982 |
0.04400 |
111 |
92 |
16 |
3 |
859 |
Hey can you watch my stuff while I go to the bathroom oh wait never mind I’m, um, yeah I’m good. |
1.1982 |
0.05090 |
111 |
96 |
8 |
7 |
860 |
It’s my wife’s day to use the treadmill desk. |
1.1982 |
0.04400 |
111 |
92 |
16 |
3 |
861 |
Zoom meating in 2minutes. |
1.1982 |
0.04582 |
111 |
93 |
14 |
4 |
862 |
OK, you look like the answer to our lifeguard shortage! |
1.1981 |
0.05090 |
106 |
91 |
9 |
6 |
863 |
We’re struggling to stay afloat. |
1.1981 |
0.04327 |
106 |
87 |
17 |
2 |
864 |
I’m a project manager but my gig job is lifeguard |
1.1981 |
0.04724 |
106 |
89 |
13 |
4 |
865 |
I've had to do all my own typing since they closed the secretarial pool. |
1.1981 |
0.04327 |
106 |
87 |
17 |
2 |
866 |
Is the tie too much? |
1.1981 |
0.04114 |
106 |
86 |
19 |
1 |
867 |
I’m in management training. Next week I have to walk ON water. |
1.1981 |
0.05090 |
106 |
91 |
9 |
6 |
868 |
Oh, yes. I’m American. |
1.1981 |
0.04114 |
106 |
86 |
19 |
1 |
869 |
Yeah, I’m trying to get out more |
1.1981 |
0.04114 |
106 |
86 |
19 |
1 |
870 |
Our office is trying the new ‘Work-From-Vacation’ model. |
1.1980 |
0.04454 |
101 |
83 |
16 |
2 |
871 |
Winning the Office Pool isn't all it's cracked up to be! |
1.1979 |
0.04826 |
96 |
80 |
13 |
3 |
872 |
Thank god they havent banned “work from pool” yet |
1.1979 |
0.05048 |
96 |
81 |
11 |
4 |
873 |
You definitely told that this survery would be immersive. |
1.1967 |
0.04748 |
122 |
105 |
10 |
7 |
874 |
And have you thought about using annuities as part of your retirement planning? |
1.1966 |
0.04581 |
117 |
99 |
13 |
5 |
875 |
It's a tutorial on work-life balance. |
1.1966 |
0.04581 |
117 |
99 |
13 |
5 |
876 |
Lastly, how would you rate this survey? 5 being extremely awkward and intrusive, 4 very awkward and intrusive, 3 moderately awkward and intrusive, 2 slightly awkward and intrusive, or 1 not at all awkward and intrusive? |
1.1966 |
0.04581 |
117 |
99 |
13 |
5 |
877 |
You may not think so but you’re in deep water |
1.1964 |
0.04545 |
112 |
94 |
14 |
4 |
878 |
Actually, I'm on a deadline and I needed to pee. |
1.1964 |
0.04718 |
112 |
95 |
12 |
5 |
879 |
I'm swimming in work. |
1.1964 |
0.04545 |
112 |
94 |
14 |
4 |
880 |
It's true, you can't beat the freedom and flexibility of working remotely. |
1.1964 |
0.04364 |
112 |
93 |
16 |
3 |
881 |
Sorry, I have this lane booked until 10:30. |
1.1964 |
0.04545 |
112 |
94 |
14 |
4 |
882 |
Do you mind?! |
1.1964 |
0.03979 |
112 |
91 |
20 |
1 |
883 |
The beach is just too sandy. |
1.1963 |
0.04491 |
107 |
89 |
15 |
3 |
884 |
Pool Party Pooper. |
1.1963 |
0.04290 |
107 |
88 |
17 |
2 |
885 |
I'm a professional swimmer. Answering emails is my hobby. |
1.1963 |
0.04683 |
107 |
90 |
13 |
4 |
886 |
I like to get out of the office on the weekends. |
1.1961 |
0.04629 |
102 |
85 |
14 |
3 |
887 |
Some people do laps, some people do laptops. |
1.1961 |
0.04629 |
102 |
85 |
14 |
3 |
888 |
We’re putting together a pool of investors. |
1.1961 |
0.05221 |
102 |
88 |
8 |
6 |
889 |
I have a zoom meeting |
1.1961 |
0.04415 |
102 |
84 |
16 |
2 |
890 |
I miss the days when we had a dedicated typing pool. |
1.1961 |
0.04189 |
102 |
83 |
18 |
1 |
891 |
Billable hours, am I right? |
1.1961 |
0.05031 |
102 |
87 |
10 |
5 |
892 |
I’m just swimming in emails. |
1.1959 |
0.05000 |
97 |
82 |
11 |
4 |
893 |
There are laps and lap tops. |
1.1959 |
0.04308 |
97 |
79 |
17 |
1 |
894 |
I'm taking advantage of my company's "unlimited" PTO. |
1.1959 |
0.04780 |
97 |
81 |
13 |
3 |
895 |
The men's room was occupied. |
1.1957 |
0.05182 |
92 |
78 |
10 |
4 |
896 |
My new boss told me to dive right in. |
1.1957 |
0.04698 |
92 |
76 |
14 |
2 |
897 |
Seems I won the office pool. |
1.1953 |
0.03852 |
128 |
105 |
21 |
2 |
898 |
Drowning in debt? Let me help. |
1.1951 |
0.04107 |
123 |
102 |
18 |
3 |
899 |
Just a quick email... |
1.1949 |
0.04039 |
118 |
97 |
19 |
2 |
900 |
Do you mind. I am doing my finger aerobics. |
1.1947 |
0.04846 |
113 |
97 |
10 |
6 |
901 |
I can get you a decent refund, and you can get me a towel. |
1.1947 |
0.04680 |
113 |
96 |
12 |
5 |
902 |
Your health insurance doesn’t cover “shrinking”. |
1.1947 |
0.04508 |
113 |
95 |
14 |
4 |
903 |
I’m not wearing shoes. That would be weird. |
1.1947 |
0.04680 |
113 |
96 |
12 |
5 |
904 |
This is is the only spot I can get a decent Wi-Fi signal. |
1.1947 |
0.04329 |
113 |
94 |
16 |
3 |
905 |
I was told to stay in my own lane. |
1.1944 |
0.04643 |
108 |
91 |
13 |
4 |
906 |
No, maritime law. Why? |
1.1942 |
0.04588 |
103 |
86 |
14 |
3 |
907 |
I'm almost ready for our deep dive. |
1.1942 |
0.04376 |
103 |
85 |
16 |
2 |
908 |
Sorry dude, this is the remote work lane. |
1.1942 |
0.04791 |
103 |
87 |
12 |
4 |
909 |
Never seen a guy wet his pants? |
1.1942 |
0.04588 |
103 |
86 |
14 |
3 |
910 |
You think I’M underwater. |
1.1942 |
0.04986 |
103 |
88 |
10 |
5 |
911 |
One way or another, I'm gonna make a big splash! |
1.1942 |
0.04791 |
103 |
87 |
12 |
4 |
912 |
The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue is now hiring consultants |
1.1942 |
0.04153 |
103 |
84 |
18 |
1 |
913 |
No, you're not real. You're just part of my video meeting background. |
1.1939 |
0.05361 |
98 |
85 |
7 |
6 |
914 |
I said your policy is in your trunk not your trunks! |
1.1939 |
0.04735 |
98 |
82 |
13 |
3 |
915 |
A lot of my companies are underwater. |
1.1939 |
0.04953 |
98 |
83 |
11 |
4 |
916 |
Don’t worry, I’m muted |
1.1939 |
0.04735 |
98 |
82 |
13 |
3 |
917 |
And how long have you felt this way? |
1.1939 |
0.04953 |
98 |
83 |
11 |
4 |
918 |
I love summer |
1.1939 |
0.04735 |
98 |
82 |
13 |
3 |
919 |
Any idea what the Wi-Fi password is? |
1.1935 |
0.05130 |
93 |
79 |
10 |
4 |
920 |
I love the smell of chlorine in the morning. |
1.1935 |
0.04652 |
93 |
77 |
14 |
2 |
921 |
With the new merger, I'm drowning. |
1.1933 |
0.03826 |
119 |
97 |
21 |
1 |
922 |
I’m drowning in work but working from the shallow end really gives me the sense of control I’m looking for. |
1.1933 |
0.04349 |
119 |
100 |
15 |
4 |
923 |
As long as I'm in the water 40 percent of the time, this counts as a home office. |
1.1930 |
0.04642 |
114 |
97 |
12 |
5 |
924 |
The trick is to blur your background. |
1.1930 |
0.04471 |
114 |
96 |
14 |
4 |
925 |
It's this or the office! |
1.1930 |
0.04109 |
114 |
94 |
18 |
2 |
926 |
If you must know, it's called a bathing suit suit. |
1.1927 |
0.04604 |
109 |
92 |
13 |
4 |
927 |
Have you got a synonym for vacation? |
1.1927 |
0.04604 |
109 |
92 |
13 |
4 |
928 |
Hey! You do your thing and I'll do mine. |
1.1927 |
0.04013 |
109 |
89 |
19 |
1 |
929 |
Could you ask the lifeguard for the WiFi password? |
1.1927 |
0.04785 |
109 |
93 |
11 |
5 |
930 |
It’s called a Keystroke |
1.1923 |
0.04117 |
104 |
85 |
18 |
1 |
931 |
I'm advising we liquidate. |
1.1923 |
0.04548 |
104 |
87 |
14 |
3 |
932 |
It just seems like we have different definitions of “fun” |
1.1923 |
0.04548 |
104 |
87 |
14 |
3 |
933 |
It’s too hard to type in the deep end |
1.1919 |
0.05310 |
99 |
86 |
7 |
6 |
934 |
My wife said I should take part in the office pool |
1.1919 |
0.04906 |
99 |
84 |
11 |
4 |
935 |
I know I said I’d be happy to come to you but… |
1.1919 |
0.04229 |
99 |
81 |
17 |
1 |
936 |
Being in the pool means I'm technically not a workaholic. |
1.1915 |
0.04607 |
94 |
78 |
14 |
2 |
937 |
Because of global warming, the standing in water desk is the wave of the future.” |
1.1913 |
0.04260 |
115 |
96 |
16 |
3 |
938 |
I call it "multi-basking." |
1.1913 |
0.04260 |
115 |
96 |
16 |
3 |
939 |
Yes, I go through a lot of computers, and pants |
1.1913 |
0.04767 |
115 |
99 |
10 |
6 |
940 |
Your rectal exam was normal and you can put you bathing suit back on now. |
1.1913 |
0.04435 |
115 |
97 |
14 |
4 |
941 |
This also counts as my bathroom break. |
1.1913 |
0.04767 |
115 |
99 |
10 |
6 |
942 |
I’m multitasking. I’m also the lifeguard. |
1.1913 |
0.03885 |
115 |
94 |
20 |
1 |
943 |
I’m trying to stand out in the candidate pool. |
1.1913 |
0.04435 |
115 |
97 |
14 |
4 |
944 |
You're right, usually we don't take on office jobs, but the mer-kids need braces. |
1.1910 |
0.05022 |
89 |
75 |
11 |
3 |
945 |
The person at the front desk told me pool was a ‘hot spot.’ |
1.1910 |
0.05270 |
89 |
76 |
9 |
4 |
946 |
Summer Fridays just aren't what they used to be. |
1.1909 |
0.04379 |
110 |
92 |
15 |
3 |
947 |
They won’t let me wear my speedo in the office. |
1.1909 |
0.04745 |
110 |
94 |
11 |
5 |
948 |
Don’t you know? Working from home is not a thing anymore. |
1.1909 |
0.04745 |
110 |
94 |
11 |
5 |
949 |
Is it backspace or backstroke? |
1.1908 |
0.04213 |
131 |
111 |
15 |
5 |
950 |
I’m sorry. The bathroom was locked. |
1.1905 |
0.04300 |
105 |
87 |
16 |
2 |
951 |
What's the wifi password here? |
1.1905 |
0.04508 |
105 |
88 |
14 |
3 |
952 |
I'm trying to create a realistic splash page. |
1.1905 |
0.05482 |
84 |
72 |
8 |
4 |
953 |
No, it works out great. Everyone at work just thinks it’s a virtual background. |
1.1905 |
0.04897 |
105 |
90 |
10 |
5 |
954 |
My boss said I can work 2 days from home Saturday & Sunday |
1.1905 |
0.05081 |
105 |
91 |
8 |
6 |
955 |
My firm still hasn’t fully committed to casual Fridays |
1.1905 |
0.04173 |
126 |
106 |
16 |
4 |
956 |
I’m in liquid asset management. |
1.1905 |
0.04508 |
105 |
88 |
14 |
3 |
957 |
Would you mind watching this while I do a cannonball? |
1.1901 |
0.04440 |
121 |
103 |
13 |
5 |
958 |
We are committed to meet anywhere for your convenience. |
1.1900 |
0.03943 |
100 |
81 |
19 |
0 |
959 |
The pool of applicants is shallower than I thought. |
1.1900 |
0.04648 |
100 |
84 |
13 |
3 |
960 |
Your password, please" |
1.1900 |
0.04648 |
100 |
84 |
13 |
3 |
961 |
Sir, I have an opening in lane 6 at 2:15. Are you a member of our rewards program? |
1.1900 |
0.04648 |
100 |
84 |
13 |
3 |
962 |
I'm getting my laps in too. |
1.1900 |
0.04426 |
100 |
83 |
15 |
2 |
963 |
Do you know how to do the keystroke? |
1.1897 |
0.04045 |
116 |
96 |
18 |
2 |
964 |
I'm drowning in work |
1.1897 |
0.03855 |
116 |
95 |
20 |
1 |
965 |
Work life balance |
1.1897 |
0.04226 |
116 |
97 |
16 |
3 |
966 |
I write off the pool as a business expense |
1.1897 |
0.04226 |
116 |
97 |
16 |
3 |
967 |
Who farted? |
1.1897 |
0.04567 |
116 |
99 |
12 |
5 |
968 |
On the Internet, nobody knows you’re a dog paddler. |
1.1897 |
0.04400 |
116 |
98 |
14 |
4 |
969 |
Not everyone gets a summer vacation. |
1.1897 |
0.04045 |
116 |
96 |
18 |
2 |
970 |
100 yards! I mean, you can't beat the commute. |
1.1895 |
0.04802 |
95 |
80 |
12 |
3 |
971 |
You maybe swimming in debt but your not underwater. |
1.1895 |
0.05247 |
95 |
82 |
8 |
5 |
972 |
I'm the Swim-Up Barrister. |
1.1892 |
0.04343 |
111 |
93 |
15 |
3 |
973 |
Thought I’d see what this work-life balance thing is all about |
1.1892 |
0.04150 |
111 |
92 |
17 |
2 |
974 |
Does the water feel warmer next to me? |
1.1892 |
0.04343 |
111 |
93 |
15 |
3 |
975 |
Why do they always schedule our annual pool party on the last day of the fiscal year? |
1.1892 |
0.04705 |
111 |
95 |
11 |
5 |
976 |
You know, you can really work from anywhere these days. |
1.1892 |
0.04150 |
111 |
92 |
17 |
2 |
977 |
Do you mind? This is highly classified. |
1.1892 |
0.05041 |
111 |
97 |
7 |
7 |
978 |
We are still working out our hybrid policy. |
1.1892 |
0.04527 |
111 |
94 |
13 |
4 |
979 |
Hey, it beats drowning in work. |
1.1892 |
0.04705 |
111 |
95 |
11 |
5 |
980 |
I’m just gonna send this one off quickly, it’s Jim right? |
1.1892 |
0.04527 |
111 |
94 |
13 |
4 |
981 |
During your stay with us, have you experienced any annoyances we should know about? |
1.1890 |
0.04434 |
127 |
109 |
12 |
6 |
982 |
I understand you’re working out of office, but we’re questioning pool membership as a business expense . |
1.1889 |
0.04970 |
90 |
76 |
11 |
3 |
983 |
...and, do you perform flip turns all the time, very often, some times, not very often, or never? |
1.1889 |
0.05450 |
90 |
78 |
7 |
5 |
984 |
Good thing your assets are liquid. |
1.1889 |
0.04440 |
90 |
74 |
15 |
1 |
985 |
My office has a no-swimsuit policy. |
1.1887 |
0.04469 |
106 |
89 |
14 |
3 |
986 |
To sink or to swim is a false choice! |
1.1887 |
0.04854 |
106 |
91 |
10 |
5 |
987 |
Unlike your typical lifeguard, I'm not just a piece of meat. |
1.1885 |
0.04558 |
122 |
105 |
11 |
6 |
988 |
Let’s take it offline and circle back, Jim. |
1.1885 |
0.04250 |
122 |
103 |
15 |
4 |
989 |
Nothing. What’s wrong with you? |
1.1882 |
0.04878 |
85 |
71 |
12 |
2 |
990 |
I'm not going away until you buy some life insurance. |
1.1881 |
0.04386 |
101 |
84 |
15 |
2 |
991 |
It still beats commuting. |
1.1881 |
0.04606 |
101 |
85 |
13 |
3 |
992 |
I'm testing the webcam. Babe in one-piece heading due east. |
1.1881 |
0.04386 |
101 |
84 |
15 |
2 |
993 |
Yes,it's a bathing suit,I just forgot the jacket. |
1.1881 |
0.04816 |
101 |
86 |
11 |
4 |
994 |
Harold didn’t quite understand the concept of work-life balance. |
1.1881 |
0.04606 |
101 |
85 |
13 |
3 |
995 |
Did you know that your Car Warranty is about to expire? |
1.1881 |
0.05017 |
101 |
87 |
9 |
5 |
996 |
It can get uncomfortable in the winter |
1.1881 |
0.04606 |
101 |
85 |
13 |
3 |
997 |
No, it's not unusual. It's just an example of the lengths we go to for our clients |
1.1880 |
0.04365 |
117 |
99 |
14 |
4 |
998 |
I’m trying to have a better work-life balance. |
1.1880 |
0.04531 |
117 |
100 |
12 |
5 |
999 |
My office is where I am. |
1.1880 |
0.04193 |
117 |
98 |
16 |
3 |
1000 |
Who says men can't multitask? |
1.1875 |
0.04519 |
96 |
80 |
14 |
2 |
1001 |
My new job gave me a Work From Pool option. |
1.1875 |
0.05403 |
96 |
84 |
6 |
6 |
1002 |
Bevause I have cellulite |
1.1875 |
0.04666 |
112 |
96 |
11 |
5 |
1003 |
Yeah, but nowadays you can blur the background. |
1.1875 |
0.04307 |
112 |
94 |
15 |
3 |
1004 |
Actually, my shoes *are* waterproof. |
1.1875 |
0.04307 |
112 |
94 |
15 |
3 |
1005 |
No, we don’t accept walk-ins. |
1.1875 |
0.04307 |
112 |
94 |
15 |
3 |
1006 |
Summers are half-days. |
1.1875 |
0.04270 |
96 |
79 |
16 |
1 |
1007 |
This is the only place my wifi works. |
1.1875 |
0.04999 |
112 |
98 |
7 |
7 |
1008 |
Since the pandemic, I can work from anywhere. |
1.1870 |
0.04218 |
123 |
104 |
15 |
4 |
1009 |
I started my career in the secretarial pool. |
1.1870 |
0.04373 |
123 |
105 |
13 |
5 |
1010 |
Oh, fuck! |
1.1870 |
0.04809 |
123 |
108 |
7 |
8 |
1011 |
When you love your work, every day's a vacation. |
1.1869 |
0.04625 |
107 |
91 |
12 |
4 |
1012 |
You mean this isn’t the typing pool? |
1.1869 |
0.04812 |
107 |
92 |
10 |
5 |
1013 |
It’s just a first round interview |
1.1869 |
0.04227 |
107 |
89 |
16 |
2 |
1014 |
I see you have liquidity issues in your portfolio |
1.1868 |
0.04920 |
91 |
77 |
11 |
3 |
1015 |
The tie keeps me focused |
1.1868 |
0.04108 |
91 |
74 |
17 |
0 |
1016 |
RE: MARCO
As per my previous e-mail, POLO. |
1.1868 |
0.05162 |
91 |
78 |
9 |
4 |
1017 |
The recruiter said I would be joining an elite talent pool." |
1.1868 |
0.04920 |
91 |
77 |
11 |
3 |
1018 |
Lap, laptop. Same difference. |
1.1864 |
0.04161 |
118 |
99 |
16 |
3 |
1019 |
Good morning, Ron. |
1.1864 |
0.04161 |
118 |
99 |
16 |
3 |
1020 |
Very apt metaphor Fred. Your stocks were doing swimmingly, now largely under water. |
1.1864 |
0.04161 |
118 |
99 |
16 |
3 |
1021 |
Why can't I surf in the pool? |
1.1864 |
0.04495 |
118 |
101 |
12 |
5 |
1022 |
I was just assigned to the clerical pool. |
1.1864 |
0.04331 |
118 |
100 |
14 |
4 |
1023 |
How many times do I have to tell you, my name is not MARCO! |
1.1864 |
0.04161 |
118 |
99 |
16 |
3 |
1024 |
Fuck, I forgot to attach the files again, gimme a minute |
1.1864 |
0.04161 |
118 |
99 |
16 |
3 |
1025 |
I wasn't getting enough attention working in a coffee shop. |
1.1863 |
0.04772 |
102 |
87 |
11 |
4 |
1026 |
My employer sold the office during the pandemic, and I don’t like to work from home. So here I am. |
1.1863 |
0.04346 |
102 |
85 |
15 |
2 |
1027 |
Why? Because this is where the jet is. |
1.1863 |
0.04346 |
102 |
85 |
15 |
2 |
1028 |
Nothing much. Just relaxing at the pool on vacation. |
1.1863 |
0.04971 |
102 |
88 |
9 |
5 |
1029 |
I'm here to improve my liquidity ratio. |
1.1863 |
0.04772 |
102 |
87 |
11 |
4 |
1030 |
What do you mean 'what do I do'? |
1.1863 |
0.04564 |
102 |
86 |
13 |
3 |
1031 |
Yeah, I really needed this vacation. Btw, how'd you know I'm American? |
1.1863 |
0.04564 |
102 |
86 |
13 |
3 |
1032 |
I just need 10 minutes of your time for this survey. |
1.1860 |
0.05363 |
86 |
74 |
8 |
4 |
1033 |
Is there an outlet over there? |
1.1858 |
0.04795 |
113 |
98 |
9 |
6 |
1034 |
The tropical scene on my Zoom background malfunctioned. |
1.1858 |
0.04627 |
113 |
97 |
11 |
5 |
1035 |
Hmm. A customized massage life guard chair is a fair request, when can you start. |
1.1858 |
0.03885 |
113 |
93 |
19 |
1 |
1036 |
You think this is bad; try the secretarial pool. |
1.1858 |
0.04795 |
113 |
98 |
9 |
6 |
1037 |
It was either this or lose the vacation days. |
1.1856 |
0.04476 |
97 |
81 |
14 |
2 |
1038 |
I'm working from pool. |
1.1856 |
0.04710 |
97 |
82 |
12 |
3 |
1039 |
I was hired as a floater but I’m hoping something higher opens soon |
1.1856 |
0.04933 |
97 |
83 |
10 |
4 |
1040 |
Oh, it's the adult diaper that I'm examining.
But the laptop is waterproof too. |
1.1856 |
0.04476 |
97 |
81 |
14 |
2 |
1041 |
Beats going into the office. |
1.1856 |
0.03968 |
97 |
79 |
18 |
0 |
1042 |
The office pool was empty. |
1.1856 |
0.04933 |
97 |
83 |
10 |
4 |
1043 |
I'm the new director of work-life balance." |
1.1856 |
0.04933 |
97 |
83 |
10 |
4 |
1044 |
I’m sorry sir, you can’t claim friends and neighbors in your pool as dependents, even during this heatwave. |
1.1856 |
0.04710 |
97 |
82 |
12 |
3 |
1045 |
I’m technically working from home. |
1.1856 |
0.04933 |
97 |
83 |
10 |
4 |
1046 |
It’s better on your knees than a traditional standing desk |
1.1856 |
0.03968 |
97 |
79 |
18 |
0 |
1047 |
It's all a part of my dullness. |
1.1852 |
0.04948 |
108 |
94 |
8 |
6 |
1048 |
I'm the field tester for the Bomborg Waterproof Tie Company. |
1.1852 |
0.04585 |
108 |
92 |
12 |
4 |
1049 |
I took a real bath in the stock market, but I think I’ll make a splash with commodities. |
1.1852 |
0.04191 |
108 |
90 |
16 |
2 |
1050 |
You don’t win Salesman of the Year sitting behind a desk you know. |
1.1852 |
0.04585 |
108 |
92 |
12 |
4 |
1051 |
I'm sorry sir, was that MARCO with a "C" or MARKO with a "K? |
1.1852 |
0.04393 |
108 |
91 |
14 |
3 |
1052 |
When you asked me to take a deep dive into your finances, this wasn't what I was expecting. |
1.1852 |
0.06114 |
81 |
72 |
3 |
6 |
1053 |
Sure beats the car pool. |
1.1852 |
0.04585 |
108 |
92 |
12 |
4 |
1054 |
This way I’ll be ready when ocean levels rise. |
1.1852 |
0.03755 |
108 |
88 |
20 |
0 |
1055 |
I don’t feel the weight of work here. |
1.1852 |
0.04393 |
108 |
91 |
14 |
3 |
1056 |
HR required me to take a vacation. |
1.1849 |
0.04128 |
119 |
100 |
16 |
3 |
1057 |
How likely are you to recommend this pool to a friend? |
1.1849 |
0.04460 |
119 |
102 |
12 |
5 |
1058 |
As your legal counsel, I advise you to avoid the deep end at all costs. |
1.1848 |
0.04069 |
92 |
75 |
17 |
0 |
1059 |
So, can I count on you for the time-share presentation at 5pm? |
1.1848 |
0.04870 |
92 |
78 |
11 |
3 |
1060 |
Snd finally, Sir, would you rate your overall pool experience today as "Excellent", "Above Expectations", "Satisfactory", "Below Expectations", or "Poor"? |
1.1848 |
0.04870 |
92 |
78 |
11 |
3 |
1061 |
Excuse me sir, would you like to update your swimsuit warrantee. |
1.1845 |
0.04523 |
103 |
87 |
13 |
3 |
1062 |
Wading is the new standing. |
1.1845 |
0.04523 |
103 |
87 |
13 |
3 |
1063 |
I’m remote vactioning. |
1.1845 |
0.04308 |
103 |
86 |
15 |
2 |
1064 |
I promised my wife I would relax while on vacation but I also promised my boss I would be on this last zoom call so I’m googling how to do the backstroke while waiting for everyone to get into the chat room. Thanks for asking. How’s your day going? |
1.1845 |
0.04729 |
103 |
88 |
11 |
4 |
1065 |
You’re swimming in debt, Bill |
1.1845 |
0.03840 |
103 |
84 |
19 |
0 |
1066 |
They gave us a floating holiday |
1.1845 |
0.04729 |
103 |
88 |
11 |
4 |
1067 |
I'm an electrical engineer doing research on the conductivity of stupidity. |
1.1842 |
0.04238 |
114 |
96 |
15 |
3 |
1068 |
I'm accused of not knowing how to relax. |
1.1842 |
0.04417 |
114 |
97 |
13 |
4 |
1069 |
I'm in the process of liquidating my assets." |
1.1842 |
0.04589 |
114 |
98 |
11 |
5 |
1070 |
My business is going under. |
1.1840 |
0.04156 |
125 |
106 |
15 |
4 |
1071 |
We've narrowed the applicant pool to you and few others. |
1.1839 |
0.04775 |
87 |
73 |
12 |
2 |
1072 |
Double trouble. You're underwater and under audit. |
1.1839 |
0.04486 |
87 |
72 |
14 |
1 |
1073 |
Office AC is not working. |
1.1837 |
0.04666 |
98 |
83 |
12 |
3 |
1074 |
It's OK, my boss can't see that I'm wearing sweatpants" |
1.1837 |
0.04435 |
98 |
82 |
14 |
2 |
1075 |
I’ve been told my prose is too dry. |
1.1837 |
0.05299 |
98 |
86 |
6 |
6 |
1076 |
Sorry, I don't discuss work on vacation. |
1.1837 |
0.04886 |
98 |
84 |
10 |
4 |
1077 |
At least they dropped the mask mandates |
1.1837 |
0.04435 |
98 |
82 |
14 |
2 |
1078 |
OMG look, he's connected . . . "Hey, could you check my email?" |
1.1837 |
0.04666 |
98 |
83 |
12 |
3 |
1079 |
This way I don't need to clock out for bathroom breaks. |
1.1837 |
0.04666 |
98 |
83 |
12 |
3 |
1080 |
Everything is so fluid. |
1.1837 |
0.04666 |
98 |
83 |
12 |
3 |
1081 |
#workfromhome |
1.1835 |
0.04355 |
109 |
92 |
14 |
3 |
1082 |
I can’t swim. |
1.1835 |
0.04156 |
109 |
91 |
16 |
2 |
1083 |
I reserved this lane for the next nine hours. |
1.1835 |
0.04156 |
109 |
91 |
16 |
2 |
1084 |
Would you mind? I have a Zoom meeting. |
1.1835 |
0.04546 |
109 |
93 |
12 |
4 |
1085 |
Well my company said I wasn't allowed to work from home anymore |
1.1835 |
0.04546 |
109 |
93 |
12 |
4 |
1086 |
We've had complaints about splashing.” |
1.1835 |
0.04906 |
109 |
95 |
8 |
6 |
1087 |
I need to pause the presentation for a second…Polo! |
1.1835 |
0.04156 |
109 |
91 |
16 |
2 |
1088 |
I thought the Swiss were neutral! |
1.1833 |
0.04731 |
120 |
105 |
8 |
7 |
1089 |
My Dr. said I needed to get in the pool for at least 50 minutes a day. |
1.1833 |
0.04731 |
120 |
105 |
8 |
7 |
1090 |
Suns_out_buns_out isn’t the password, sir. Can we go back to the office now? |
1.1833 |
0.04264 |
120 |
102 |
14 |
4 |
1091 |
I told them it's a fake background. |
1.1828 |
0.04822 |
93 |
79 |
11 |
3 |
1092 |
I understand why WeWork had to change its business model, but this is ridiculous... |
1.1828 |
0.04822 |
93 |
79 |
11 |
3 |
1093 |
I just told them it was a background. |
1.1828 |
0.04573 |
93 |
78 |
13 |
2 |
1094 |
Well, how do*you* do the backstroke? |
1.1828 |
0.04822 |
93 |
79 |
11 |
3 |
1095 |
These are the rules. I didn't make them. |
1.1828 |
0.04573 |
93 |
78 |
13 |
2 |
1096 |
Practiced the backstroke yesterday. Working on my keystroke today”. |
1.1828 |
0.04822 |
93 |
79 |
11 |
3 |
1097 |
Desk jobs are for suckers! |
1.1828 |
0.04573 |
93 |
78 |
13 |
2 |
1098 |
If only there was a water or drowning metaphor I could use in this email. |
1.1827 |
0.04483 |
104 |
88 |
13 |
3 |
1099 |
No, sir, I am definitely not going off the deep end. |
1.1827 |
0.04270 |
104 |
87 |
15 |
2 |
1100 |
Sorry. This is the carpool lane. |
1.1827 |
0.04483 |
104 |
88 |
13 |
3 |
1101 |
As long as my boss thinks I am working, I can do it from anywhere. |
1.1827 |
0.04687 |
104 |
89 |
11 |
4 |
1102 |
It's okay, I'm just part time. |
1.1827 |
0.04483 |
104 |
88 |
13 |
3 |
1103 |
Just keeping the business afloat. |
1.1827 |
0.04687 |
104 |
89 |
11 |
4 |
1104 |
Not bad. Just don't swallow. |
1.1827 |
0.04483 |
104 |
88 |
13 |
3 |
1105 |
Could've been an email |
1.1818 |
0.04319 |
110 |
93 |
14 |
3 |
1106 |
Thirty seven hours . . . five more and I’ll be in the Guinness Book of World Records. |
1.1818 |
0.04622 |
99 |
84 |
12 |
3 |
1107 |
I didn't account for shrinkage. |
1.1818 |
0.03896 |
99 |
81 |
18 |
0 |
1108 |
I’m working remotely. |
1.1818 |
0.03711 |
121 |
100 |
20 |
1 |
1109 |
These days, I prefer wading the web. |
1.1818 |
0.04622 |
99 |
84 |
12 |
3 |
1110 |
I couldn't decide if I should go to the office or work at home today. |
1.1818 |
0.04994 |
88 |
75 |
10 |
3 |
1111 |
Yeah my job is remote, but I still like to dress like I'm going in. |
1.1818 |
0.04689 |
110 |
95 |
10 |
5 |
1112 |
If my calculations are correct, then Marco is right over - THERE! |
1.1818 |
0.04840 |
99 |
85 |
10 |
4 |
1113 |
You are right on that one; your mortgage is underwater. |
1.1818 |
0.04994 |
88 |
75 |
10 |
3 |
1114 |
Well, at the beach it gets sand on it. |
1.1818 |
0.04622 |
99 |
84 |
12 |
3 |
1115 |
I’m studying the effects of chlorine on polyester. |
1.1818 |
0.04622 |
99 |
84 |
12 |
3 |
1116 |
Do you have a charger by chance? |
1.1818 |
0.05048 |
99 |
86 |
8 |
5 |
1117 |
I'm the pool reporter from the Associated Press. |
1.1818 |
0.04725 |
88 |
74 |
12 |
2 |
1118 |
This is the only place I can get a signal. |
1.1818 |
0.04725 |
88 |
74 |
12 |
2 |
1119 |
Remote work has been a life-saver for me! |
1.1818 |
0.04622 |
99 |
84 |
12 |
3 |
1120 |
People might say ‘it’s weird’ but someday what I’m doing will be featured in The New Yorker… you’ll see. You all see. |
1.1818 |
0.05249 |
99 |
87 |
6 |
6 |
1121 |
Welcome to the typing pool. |
1.1810 |
0.03986 |
116 |
97 |
17 |
2 |
1122 |
My boss said I didn't know how to relax and to go take some time off. |
1.1810 |
0.03986 |
116 |
97 |
17 |
2 |
1123 |
We found this to be more effective than robocalling. |
1.1810 |
0.04170 |
116 |
98 |
15 |
3 |
1124 |
Stay in your lane. |
1.1810 |
0.04010 |
105 |
87 |
17 |
1 |
1125 |
Technically I'm retired, but I like to keep my feet wet. |
1.1810 |
0.04232 |
105 |
88 |
15 |
2 |
1126 |
They think it's my Zoom background. |
1.1809 |
0.05231 |
94 |
82 |
7 |
5 |
1127 |
We're not saying swimming is dangerous. On the other hand, actuarially there's this number to consider. |
1.1809 |
0.04774 |
94 |
80 |
11 |
3 |
1128 |
It’s my day with the kids. I believe in equality. |
1.1809 |
0.04528 |
94 |
79 |
13 |
2 |
1129 |
I was just hired here and they told me to dive right in! |
1.1809 |
0.04528 |
94 |
79 |
13 |
2 |
1130 |
Actually, I'm practicing my key stroke. |
1.1809 |
0.03991 |
94 |
77 |
17 |
0 |
1131 |
The 'swim-up' desk is supposed to be great for productivity. |
1.1809 |
0.04528 |
94 |
79 |
13 |
2 |
1132 |
The actuarial tables say that at your pace, you need to keep swimming for another 400 years to counteract all the cheeseburgers. |
1.1809 |
0.04774 |
94 |
80 |
11 |
3 |
1133 |
I’ve set my auto-reply to say that I’m swimming in work and will resurface next Monday. |
1.1809 |
0.05008 |
94 |
81 |
9 |
4 |
1134 |
Well, they said I could work from anywhere |
1.1803 |
0.03863 |
122 |
102 |
18 |
2 |
1135 |
Yes,we are hiring but the talent pool is shallow! |
1.1802 |
0.04989 |
111 |
98 |
6 |
7 |
1136 |
I find this makes it easier to wade into the numbers. |
1.1802 |
0.04283 |
111 |
94 |
14 |
3 |
1137 |
Sorry, I’m just swimming in emails today. |
1.1802 |
0.04470 |
111 |
95 |
12 |
4 |
1138 |
If you could all stop swimming and make office noises during my presentation, that would be great |
1.1802 |
0.04823 |
111 |
97 |
8 |
6 |
1139 |
I just can’t commit. |
1.1800 |
0.04353 |
100 |
84 |
14 |
2 |
1140 |
Now, let’s discuss flood insurance. |
1.1800 |
0.04579 |
100 |
85 |
12 |
3 |
1141 |
I don't have time to take a bathroom break. |
1.1800 |
0.04579 |
100 |
85 |
12 |
3 |
1142 |
I'm not a Speedo kind of guy. |
1.1800 |
0.04115 |
100 |
83 |
16 |
1 |
1143 |
The doc recommended hydro therapy for my carpal tunnel syndrome. |
1.1800 |
0.04795 |
100 |
86 |
10 |
4 |
1144 |
Sorry if I’m in your lap lane, my wi fi was disconnected. |
1.1800 |
0.04795 |
100 |
86 |
10 |
4 |
1145 |
Mark always had a hard time leaving work at work. |
1.1800 |
0.04795 |
100 |
86 |
10 |
4 |
1146 |
I try to have fun. |
1.1800 |
0.04115 |
100 |
83 |
16 |
1 |
1147 |
the treadmill desks were all taken. |
1.1800 |
0.04579 |
100 |
85 |
12 |
3 |
1148 |
It still beats working from home. |
1.1798 |
0.04676 |
89 |
75 |
12 |
2 |
1149 |
I just started a new job, it’s really sink or swim. |
1.1798 |
0.04394 |
89 |
74 |
14 |
1 |
1150 |
At this point, why do you care? |
1.1798 |
0.04941 |
89 |
76 |
10 |
3 |
1151 |
I need ten pool noodles, two pairs of floaties, and a rubber duck on my desk by noon. |
1.1798 |
0.05193 |
89 |
77 |
8 |
4 |
1152 |
Let's discuss your liquidity risk. |
1.1798 |
0.04394 |
89 |
74 |
14 |
1 |
1153 |
JUST GIVE ME ANOTHER MINUTE. . . . |
1.1797 |
0.03751 |
128 |
107 |
19 |
2 |
1154 |
The hotel's free Wi-Fi is better here. |
1.1795 |
0.04797 |
117 |
103 |
7 |
7 |
1155 |
I feel like the work from anywhere culture has gone a little too far. |
1.1795 |
0.04312 |
117 |
100 |
13 |
4 |
1156 |
I need the shirt and tie for work, but the backdrop of the water makes all my colleagues jealous. |
1.1792 |
0.04405 |
106 |
90 |
13 |
3 |
1157 |
It's a zoom meeting. My swim suit is below the camera. My background is a bookshelf scene and the sound is off. |
1.1792 |
0.04405 |
106 |
90 |
13 |
3 |
1158 |
What brings you in today? |
1.1792 |
0.04196 |
106 |
89 |
15 |
2 |
1159 |
You're right, Mr President. They wouldn't think of looking for documents in here. |
1.1792 |
0.04795 |
106 |
92 |
9 |
5 |
1160 |
We make sure you don't get in over your head |
1.1792 |
0.04604 |
106 |
91 |
11 |
4 |
1161 |
Ooh that's good, yeah! This will win me the caption contest for sure. |
1.1792 |
0.04604 |
106 |
91 |
11 |
4 |
1162 |
All the stalls are full. |
1.1792 |
0.04604 |
106 |
91 |
11 |
4 |
1163 |
If you say anything Frank, you're fired. |
1.1789 |
0.05180 |
95 |
83 |
7 |
5 |
1164 |
My wife and kids wanted to go to Cancun, but I heard the water is warmer here. |
1.1789 |
0.04728 |
95 |
81 |
11 |
3 |
1165 |
I’m up to 100 strokes per minute. |
1.1789 |
0.04484 |
95 |
80 |
13 |
2 |
1166 |
I warned you up front what it would look like if you asked for an extension on your taxes. |
1.1789 |
0.04227 |
95 |
79 |
15 |
1 |
1167 |
And your date of birth is? |
1.1789 |
0.04484 |
95 |
80 |
13 |
2 |
1168 |
When was the last time you immersed yourself in work? |
1.1789 |
0.04227 |
95 |
79 |
15 |
1 |
1169 |
I am showing my wife that I'm not as much of a workaholic as she says I am! |
1.1786 |
0.04433 |
112 |
96 |
12 |
4 |
1170 |
Your the fourth person to ask. No, I am not here to swim |
1.1786 |
0.05399 |
84 |
73 |
7 |
4 |
1171 |
This way I never have to leave the office to go to the bathroom. |
1.1786 |
0.04433 |
112 |
96 |
12 |
4 |
1172 |
I’m the pool reporter. |
1.1786 |
0.05126 |
84 |
72 |
9 |
3 |
1173 |
Because in my last job they said I was in over my head. |
1.1786 |
0.04611 |
112 |
97 |
10 |
5 |
1174 |
I’m doing research for a New Yorker piece on immersive experiences. |
1.1786 |
0.04247 |
112 |
95 |
14 |
3 |
1175 |
This absolutely is a swimsuit. |
1.1786 |
0.04247 |
112 |
95 |
14 |
3 |
1176 |
I am working in the deep end. |
1.1782 |
0.04313 |
101 |
85 |
14 |
2 |
1177 |
My boss said I had to eliminate bathroom breaks. |
1.1782 |
0.04537 |
101 |
86 |
12 |
3 |
1178 |
I’ll have you know, this counts as cardio. |
1.1782 |
0.04537 |
101 |
86 |
12 |
3 |
1179 |
Is that 'laps' or 'lapse'? |
1.1782 |
0.04313 |
101 |
85 |
14 |
2 |
1180 |
And you said you wanted your portfolio to have more liquidity. |
1.1782 |
0.04537 |
101 |
86 |
12 |
3 |
1181 |
A Working Vacation |
1.1778 |
0.04628 |
90 |
76 |
12 |
2 |
1182 |
Well, not all of us can get a cushy corner office. |
1.1778 |
0.05139 |
90 |
78 |
8 |
4 |
1183 |
Team meeting in 15 minutes? |
1.1778 |
0.04350 |
90 |
75 |
14 |
1 |
1184 |
The cafe doesn't have a restroom. |
1.1778 |
0.05139 |
90 |
78 |
8 |
4 |
1185 |
Our agency takes the concept of data pooling one step further. |
1.1776 |
0.04160 |
107 |
90 |
15 |
2 |
1186 |
I'm writing opinions dripping with sarcasm. |
1.1776 |
0.04160 |
107 |
90 |
15 |
2 |
1187 |
I was a two-time All-American in the keystroke. |
1.1776 |
0.04160 |
107 |
90 |
15 |
2 |
1188 |
The WiFi is better from here |
1.1776 |
0.04367 |
107 |
91 |
13 |
3 |
1189 |
Can you dive for my mouse? |
1.1776 |
0.04753 |
107 |
93 |
9 |
5 |
1190 |
Did you know that every 2 seconds someone in the world drowns without life insurance? |
1.1776 |
0.04367 |
107 |
91 |
13 |
3 |
1191 |
I've put in a transfer for the hot tub. |
1.1776 |
0.04367 |
107 |
91 |
13 |
3 |
1192 |
Not a productive workspace, you say? Tell me this: how many times have you seen me get up to use the bathroom? |
1.1772 |
0.05628 |
79 |
69 |
6 |
4 |
1193 |
I’m on my third laptop this week |
1.1771 |
0.04682 |
96 |
82 |
11 |
3 |
1194 |
Your not in deep water......yet |
1.1771 |
0.04187 |
96 |
80 |
15 |
1 |
1195 |
We're only partly underwater. |
1.1771 |
0.04441 |
96 |
81 |
13 |
2 |
1196 |
I’m deciding from a pool of applicants. |
1.1771 |
0.05129 |
96 |
84 |
7 |
5 |
1197 |
I'm not quite ready to come out to my clients as a transgender mermaid. |
1.1771 |
0.04682 |
96 |
82 |
11 |
3 |
1198 |
I'm not trying to make you feel unproductive. |
1.1770 |
0.04572 |
113 |
98 |
10 |
5 |
1199 |
The standing desk was hurting my knees. |
1.1770 |
0.04572 |
113 |
98 |
10 |
5 |
1200 |
Couldn't we have done this with an e-mail? |
1.1770 |
0.04021 |
113 |
95 |
16 |
2 |
1201 |
Vacations are for the dispensable . |
1.1770 |
0.04396 |
113 |
97 |
12 |
4 |
1202 |
It's my answer to the typing pool. |
1.1770 |
0.04396 |
113 |
97 |
12 |
4 |
1203 |
You were correct sir. The chlorine levels do seem slightly off. |
1.1770 |
0.04021 |
113 |
95 |
16 |
2 |
1204 |
With a personal liability policy you can go in the deep end. |
1.1765 |
0.04707 |
102 |
88 |
10 |
4 |
1205 |
Have you not heard of multi-tasking? |
1.1765 |
0.04707 |
102 |
88 |
10 |
4 |
1206 |
Hybrid Holidays am I right?" |
1.1765 |
0.04041 |
102 |
85 |
16 |
1 |
1207 |
You’re doing laps and I’m on my laptop. What’s the problem? |
1.1765 |
0.04909 |
102 |
89 |
8 |
5 |
1208 |
We've been trying to reach you regarding your car's extended warranty. |
1.1765 |
0.05103 |
102 |
90 |
6 |
6 |
1209 |
They said I would be working in the office pool |
1.1765 |
0.05070 |
85 |
73 |
9 |
3 |
1210 |
Boss said get your feet wet on this one. I like to exceed expectations. |
1.1765 |
0.04786 |
85 |
72 |
11 |
2 |
1211 |
I’m here to talk to you about your car’s extended warranty. |
1.1765 |
0.04496 |
102 |
87 |
12 |
3 |
1212 |
I immerse myself in everything that I do |
1.1765 |
0.04244 |
119 |
102 |
13 |
4 |
1213 |
No, I’m not worried. It’s a wetsuit. |
1.1759 |
0.04712 |
108 |
94 |
9 |
5 |
1214 |
Looks like the market’s taking a dip. |
1.1759 |
0.04525 |
108 |
93 |
11 |
4 |
1215 |
My boss said I should stay in the shallow end of the pool. |
1.1759 |
0.04329 |
108 |
92 |
13 |
3 |
1216 |
Have you inhaled too much chlorine fumes at a public pool? You may be entitled to compensation. |
1.1759 |
0.04329 |
108 |
92 |
13 |
3 |
1217 |
My feet get hot. |
1.1758 |
0.05086 |
91 |
79 |
8 |
4 |
1218 |
Well,as a matter of a fact,I am wearing a suit." |
1.1758 |
0.04581 |
91 |
77 |
12 |
2 |
1219 |
I’m still trying to get the hang of hybrid work. |
1.1758 |
0.04306 |
91 |
76 |
14 |
1 |
1220 |
Could you tell your mom that we had fun? |
1.1758 |
0.04581 |
91 |
77 |
12 |
2 |
1221 |
The company wishes me to inform you that implicit in the concept of working from home are the notions that you are actually home, and are working… |
1.1753 |
0.04637 |
97 |
83 |
11 |
3 |
1222 |
My business is sinking so my accounts are under water. |
1.1753 |
0.04148 |
97 |
81 |
15 |
1 |
1223 |
I guess typing pools were before your time. |
1.1753 |
0.04863 |
97 |
84 |
9 |
4 |
1224 |
I thought a trip to the pool would help me get over my workaholic tendencies. |
1.1753 |
0.04637 |
97 |
83 |
11 |
3 |
1225 |
Remote working allows me to take vacations whenever I want. |
1.1753 |
0.04399 |
97 |
82 |
13 |
2 |
1226 |
Alright, everybody on? Let’s dive in. |
1.1753 |
0.04637 |
97 |
83 |
11 |
3 |
1227 |
Sir, we are asking patrons to rate their swim. From 1 to 10, how was the chlorine level? |
1.1750 |
0.04960 |
80 |
68 |
10 |
2 |
1228 |
My crawl was too slow, my breast stroke gave me trouble, so now I'm practicing key strokes. |
1.1750 |
0.05270 |
80 |
69 |
8 |
3 |
1229 |
Do you have the WiFi password? |
1.1750 |
0.05270 |
80 |
69 |
8 |
3 |
1230 |
They told me that if I worked remotely I'd really have to dive in to my projects. |
1.1748 |
0.04236 |
103 |
87 |
14 |
2 |
1231 |
Because the IRS has gone remote, too, Mr. Jones. Now, about those deductions ... |
1.1748 |
0.04455 |
103 |
88 |
12 |
3 |
1232 |
I see they have literally replaced the typing pool. |
1.1748 |
0.04455 |
103 |
88 |
12 |
3 |
1233 |
I AM on vacation. I'm not wearing any underwear. |
1.1748 |
0.04664 |
103 |
89 |
10 |
4 |
1234 |
I thought the office pool was for lotto tickets when I agreed to join. |
1.1748 |
0.03760 |
103 |
85 |
18 |
0 |
1235 |
I'm wading for my meeting to start. |
1.1748 |
0.04664 |
103 |
89 |
10 |
4 |
1236 |
No bathroom breaks on deadline. |
1.1748 |
0.04236 |
103 |
87 |
14 |
2 |
1237 |
There’s a line for the bathroom. |
1.1748 |
0.04236 |
103 |
87 |
14 |
2 |
1238 |
Just because I’m on vacation, doesn’t mean I don’t have work to do. Hashtag grind. |
1.1748 |
0.04005 |
103 |
86 |
16 |
1 |
1239 |
I’m up to my ass in alligators |
1.1748 |
0.04664 |
103 |
89 |
10 |
4 |
1240 |
Of course, I still blur my zoom background. |
1.1748 |
0.04664 |
103 |
89 |
10 |
4 |
1241 |
Looks like Marco is OOO. |
1.1748 |
0.04455 |
103 |
88 |
12 |
3 |
1242 |
I’m waiting for my carpool. |
1.1748 |
0.04664 |
103 |
89 |
10 |
4 |
1243 |
I strive for a balanced lifestyle. |
1.1744 |
0.04436 |
86 |
72 |
13 |
1 |
1244 |
I was mistaken. You're not in over your head. |
1.1744 |
0.05015 |
86 |
74 |
9 |
3 |
1245 |
Close to a vacation as I can get. |
1.1744 |
0.04734 |
86 |
73 |
11 |
2 |
1246 |
Actually, this is an improvement. Last quarter the company was under water. |
1.1743 |
0.04292 |
109 |
93 |
13 |
3 |
1247 |
I'm working on my finger stroke". |
1.1743 |
0.03876 |
109 |
91 |
17 |
1 |
1248 |
How do you spell electrocution? |
1.1743 |
0.04486 |
109 |
94 |
11 |
4 |
1249 |
No worries, this is actually a wet suit. |
1.1743 |
0.04090 |
109 |
92 |
15 |
2 |
1250 |
The recreation boss said I could work away from home if I did something about my incontinence |
1.1739 |
0.03956 |
115 |
97 |
16 |
2 |
1251 |
OK, Ned, now you can deduct your pool as a home office space. |
1.1739 |
0.04535 |
92 |
78 |
12 |
2 |
1252 |
In hindsight, yeah maybe I shouldn't have been watching Bangbus videos at work, but what's done is done, and I'm not getting out of this pool until my dick relaxes. |
1.1739 |
0.05034 |
92 |
80 |
8 |
4 |
1253 |
Sorry I can’t chat — I’m really underwater right now. |
1.1739 |
0.04145 |
115 |
98 |
14 |
3 |
1254 |
Sales always takes a dip in the third quarter. |
1.1739 |
0.04535 |
92 |
78 |
12 |
2 |
1255 |
Do you happen to know anything about virtual backgrounds? |
1.1739 |
0.04791 |
92 |
79 |
10 |
3 |
1256 |
And if you order in the next two minutes, I'll throw in the butterfly lessons for free. |
1.1739 |
0.03956 |
115 |
97 |
16 |
2 |
1257 |
Aqua Digital Nomad |
1.1739 |
0.04791 |
92 |
79 |
10 |
3 |
1258 |
No, no, no. I'm CHAD GPT. |
1.1735 |
0.04358 |
98 |
83 |
13 |
2 |
1259 |
You refresh your way, I'll refresh mine. |
1.1735 |
0.04358 |
98 |
83 |
13 |
2 |
1260 |
They are waterproof, thanks. |
1.1735 |
0.04358 |
98 |
83 |
13 |
2 |
1261 |
At Least they didn't throw me into the deep end to start. |
1.1735 |
0.04358 |
98 |
83 |
13 |
2 |
1262 |
It’s a lot quieter than working from home." |
1.1735 |
0.04816 |
98 |
85 |
9 |
4 |
1263 |
I find I get more done during adult swim. |
1.1735 |
0.04593 |
98 |
84 |
11 |
3 |
1264 |
You're swimming in debt, but we can pool your assets and make them liquid. |
1.1735 |
0.04816 |
98 |
85 |
9 |
4 |
1265 |
I'm synchronizing the swimming. |
1.1731 |
0.03970 |
104 |
87 |
16 |
1 |
1266 |
When the Agency said I'd be doing "wet work" I never imagined they meant this! |
1.1731 |
0.04415 |
104 |
89 |
12 |
3 |
1267 |
Summer FOMO |
1.1731 |
0.03970 |
104 |
87 |
16 |
1 |
1268 |
To be honest, this project has me feeling a little out of my depth. |
1.1731 |
0.04415 |
104 |
89 |
12 |
3 |
1269 |
My boss said my writing is a little dry. |
1.1731 |
0.05010 |
104 |
92 |
6 |
6 |
1270 |
At the end of the day we all are just trying to stay above water aren’t we |
1.1731 |
0.04415 |
104 |
89 |
12 |
3 |
1271 |
My boss said this data requires some experiential learning- I'm experiencing something |
1.1731 |
0.04415 |
104 |
89 |
12 |
3 |
1272 |
Eventually I'll work my way up to swimming with the sharks. |
1.1728 |
0.05209 |
81 |
70 |
8 |
3 |
1273 |
The boss said we are barely staying afloat. |
1.1727 |
0.04256 |
110 |
94 |
13 |
3 |
1274 |
Can I interest you in a floating-rate mortgage? |
1.1724 |
0.04684 |
87 |
74 |
11 |
2 |
1275 |
Wait. So this isn’t the applicant pool? |
1.1724 |
0.04961 |
87 |
75 |
9 |
3 |
1276 |
Hello! Working with electronics here. |
1.1720 |
0.04983 |
93 |
81 |
8 |
4 |
1277 |
The new work -life balance. |
1.1720 |
0.04490 |
93 |
79 |
12 |
2 |
1278 |
It's safer here than in the IT room. |
1.1720 |
0.04743 |
93 |
80 |
10 |
3 |
1279 |
CPA’s do NOT know CPR!! |
1.1720 |
0.04743 |
93 |
80 |
10 |
3 |
1280 |
The dress code just said "suit", I assumed they meant business |
1.1720 |
0.04490 |
93 |
79 |
12 |
2 |
1281 |
Combining my work and my hobby was the smartest decision i ever made. |
1.1720 |
0.04743 |
93 |
80 |
10 |
3 |
1282 |
Well, it's a LAPtop, isn't it? |
1.1720 |
0.04490 |
93 |
79 |
12 |
2 |
1283 |
I like to keep a work life balance |
1.1720 |
0.04490 |
93 |
79 |
12 |
2 |
1284 |
Does this suit make me look fat |
1.1720 |
0.04490 |
93 |
79 |
12 |
2 |
1285 |
On a scale from 1 to 10,would you say you more likely or less likely to return to the workplace? |
1.1717 |
0.04982 |
99 |
87 |
7 |
5 |
1286 |
Besides the club membership, are there other liquid assets? |
1.1717 |
0.04317 |
99 |
84 |
13 |
2 |
1287 |
You, my corpulent friend, are wasting time — literally wallowing the day away. I am, on the other hand, billing for my legal services at a ridiculously high rate while cooling my junk and keeping my nether regions nice and moist. |
1.1717 |
0.04771 |
99 |
86 |
9 |
4 |
1288 |
So Mr. Smith,because of the other swimmers,you can only deduct half of the pool from your taxes. |
1.1717 |
0.04549 |
99 |
85 |
11 |
3 |
1289 |
I got tired having to move every time I need to pee. |
1.1714 |
0.04965 |
105 |
93 |
6 |
6 |
1290 |
Pool maintenance falls under I.T. now. |
1.1714 |
0.04376 |
105 |
90 |
12 |
3 |
1291 |
As a matter of fact, I am from the shallow end of the gene pool |
1.1714 |
0.04376 |
105 |
90 |
12 |
3 |
1292 |
Hunny, can you help me shut the webcam off before my 2pm? |
1.1714 |
0.04376 |
105 |
90 |
12 |
3 |
1293 |
I'm working a hybrid schedule: MWF in the pool, and TTH in the jacuzzi. |
1.1714 |
0.04777 |
105 |
92 |
8 |
5 |
1294 |
My company instituted a return-to-office policy...I'm transitioning. |
1.1714 |
0.04162 |
105 |
89 |
14 |
2 |
1295 |
Wetwork |
1.1714 |
0.04162 |
105 |
89 |
14 |
2 |
1296 |
It’s Monday Charlie. A work day, remember? |
1.1714 |
0.03936 |
105 |
88 |
16 |
1 |
1297 |
I finally got off the corporate treadmill. |
1.1714 |
0.03936 |
105 |
88 |
16 |
1 |
1298 |
I can't get anything done at home. |
1.1714 |
0.04777 |
105 |
92 |
8 |
5 |
1299 |
Our ‘Summer Fridays’ policy at our office is a bit rigid. |
1.1714 |
0.04376 |
105 |
90 |
12 |
3 |
1300 |
My wife said I should relax and not work so much. This was our compromise. |
1.1712 |
0.04220 |
111 |
95 |
13 |
3 |
1301 |
I'm sorry the water is warm, but my boss just emailed in all caps. |
1.1712 |
0.03813 |
111 |
93 |
17 |
1 |
1302 |
It’s 9 am somewhere! |
1.1712 |
0.03813 |
111 |
93 |
17 |
1 |
1303 |
This move is called the keystroke |
1.1712 |
0.03813 |
111 |
93 |
17 |
1 |
1304 |
You're also deep in debt. |
1.1705 |
0.04634 |
88 |
75 |
11 |
2 |
1305 |
You can claim the backstroke, but the cannonballs off the high board are in your own time. |
1.1705 |
0.04634 |
88 |
75 |
11 |
2 |
1306 |
The new hires are over in the deep end. |
1.1705 |
0.05167 |
88 |
77 |
7 |
4 |
1307 |
I’m on working vacation. Why? |
1.1705 |
0.04634 |
88 |
75 |
11 |
2 |
1308 |
No, the peeing section is on the other side. |
1.1705 |
0.05167 |
88 |
77 |
7 |
4 |
1309 |
My clients assume it’s a filter. |
1.1705 |
0.04343 |
88 |
74 |
13 |
1 |
1310 |
Working poolside is overrated. |
1.1702 |
0.04696 |
94 |
81 |
10 |
3 |
1311 |
Why? Well the jet is right here. |
1.1702 |
0.04696 |
94 |
81 |
10 |
3 |
1312 |
Your swim pass please |
1.1702 |
0.04180 |
94 |
79 |
14 |
1 |
1313 |
I couldn't find the men's room |
1.1702 |
0.04696 |
94 |
81 |
10 |
3 |
1314 |
It’s a hybrid model. 50/50. |
1.1702 |
0.04180 |
94 |
79 |
14 |
1 |
1315 |
The WiFi here is fantastic. |
1.1702 |
0.04446 |
94 |
80 |
12 |
2 |
1316 |
I write such hot emails I need to chill! |
1.1702 |
0.04933 |
94 |
82 |
8 |
4 |
1317 |
Despite many odds, life still goes on |
1.1702 |
0.04446 |
94 |
80 |
12 |
2 |
1318 |
Listen, Dan. I'd love to circle back on this but I forgot my floaties, my charger, and hosently Dan, I'm just trying to keep my head above water here |
1.1702 |
0.04446 |
94 |
80 |
12 |
2 |
1319 |
I asked for a raise, but they generously gave me 3 ‘work from the pool’ days instead. |
1.1702 |
0.04933 |
94 |
82 |
8 |
4 |
1320 |
My office has a strict dress code for working from home. |
1.1702 |
0.04446 |
94 |
80 |
12 |
2 |
1321 |
It’s a video interview for the open Head Lifeguard position |
1.1702 |
0.04696 |
94 |
81 |
10 |
3 |
1322 |
This new "work from pool" option sounded better in the email. |
1.1700 |
0.04034 |
100 |
84 |
15 |
1 |
1323 |
So, on a scale of 1 to 5 with 5 being highly like and 1 being not at all, how likely are you to recommend this pool to someone you know? |
1.1700 |
0.04726 |
100 |
87 |
9 |
4 |
1324 |
The Park District's return to the office policy is strict. |
1.1700 |
0.04034 |
100 |
84 |
15 |
1 |
1325 |
I prefer to go to the pool; the office is rather dry. |
1.1700 |
0.04507 |
100 |
86 |
11 |
3 |
1326 |
Casual Friday is tomorrow. |
1.1700 |
0.04726 |
100 |
87 |
9 |
4 |
1327 |
The lap-lane was full. |
1.1700 |
0.04277 |
100 |
85 |
13 |
2 |
1328 |
We always like to verify the liquid assets of our clients. |
1.1700 |
0.04507 |
100 |
86 |
11 |
3 |
1329 |
There’s a very talented pool of candidates for this job. |
1.1700 |
0.04726 |
100 |
87 |
9 |
4 |
1330 |
Keeping it cool |
1.1700 |
0.04507 |
100 |
86 |
11 |
3 |
1331 |
This lane is reserved for platinum members. |
1.1698 |
0.04126 |
106 |
90 |
14 |
2 |
1332 |
So how long have you been teaching swimming online? |
1.1698 |
0.04734 |
106 |
93 |
8 |
5 |
1333 |
No need for bathroom breaks |
1.1698 |
0.04338 |
106 |
91 |
12 |
3 |
1334 |
I'm trying to make a splash in the industry. |
1.1698 |
0.03664 |
106 |
88 |
18 |
0 |
1335 |
It's a biography of Michael Phelps. |
1.1698 |
0.03902 |
106 |
89 |
16 |
1 |
1336 |
I'm writing an article about water sports. |
1.1698 |
0.04734 |
106 |
93 |
8 |
5 |
1337 |
From 4:00-5:00 is Business Swim. |
1.1698 |
0.04338 |
106 |
91 |
12 |
3 |
1338 |
I just took a half day of vacation. |
1.1698 |
0.04126 |
106 |
90 |
14 |
2 |
1339 |
I'm figuring the laps I need to equate to my steps to get to 10,000. |
1.1698 |
0.04338 |
106 |
91 |
12 |
3 |
1340 |
Virtual backgrounds are getting so realistic. |
1.1698 |
0.04338 |
106 |
91 |
12 |
3 |
1341 |
Do you have a charger I can borrow? |
1.1696 |
0.04373 |
112 |
97 |
11 |
4 |
1342 |
I am taking it easy. Can't you see that I'm not wearing my suit jacket? |
1.1695 |
0.04047 |
118 |
101 |
14 |
3 |
1343 |
It's my work-life balance. |
1.1695 |
0.04047 |
118 |
101 |
14 |
3 |
1344 |
Since you’re in the shallow end of the gene pool, this is the best insurance rate I can offer you. |
1.1687 |
0.04476 |
83 |
70 |
12 |
1 |
1345 |
And the higher price for the waterproof model has certainly been worth every penny. |
1.1687 |
0.05372 |
83 |
73 |
6 |
4 |
1346 |
Maybe working remotely is overrated?! |
1.1685 |
0.05113 |
89 |
78 |
7 |
4 |
1347 |
To be fair, they said I could work from anywhere. |
1.1685 |
0.04299 |
89 |
75 |
13 |
1 |
1348 |
No, it's a fully remote job- but they did keep the dress code. |
1.1684 |
0.04884 |
95 |
83 |
8 |
4 |
1349 |
And how do you deal with global warming? |
1.1684 |
0.04140 |
95 |
80 |
14 |
1 |
1350 |
Brand new. I'm calling it a "water-blog." |
1.1684 |
0.04650 |
95 |
82 |
10 |
3 |
1351 |
Different strokes for different folks I guess. |
1.1684 |
0.04884 |
95 |
83 |
8 |
4 |
1352 |
I actually booked this lane until 11... |
1.1684 |
0.04650 |
95 |
82 |
10 |
3 |
1353 |
is any one else's internet not working? |
1.1684 |
0.04650 |
95 |
82 |
10 |
3 |
1354 |
Yeah,we only get two work from home days now. |
1.1684 |
0.04140 |
95 |
80 |
14 |
1 |
1355 |
This isn't the typing pool! |
1.1683 |
0.04682 |
101 |
88 |
9 |
4 |
1356 |
Yeah, I am new here. Am gradually getting with the swim of things . |
1.1683 |
0.04238 |
101 |
86 |
13 |
2 |
1357 |
That’s alright. I don’t play golf either. |
1.1683 |
0.04465 |
101 |
87 |
11 |
3 |
1358 |
I'm joining the office pool |
1.1683 |
0.04238 |
101 |
86 |
13 |
2 |
1359 |
They said I could work remote from anywhere, I just have to keep it professional. |
1.1683 |
0.04465 |
101 |
87 |
11 |
3 |
1360 |
Technically, we get unlimited PTO, but you know what that means. |
1.1683 |
0.04465 |
101 |
87 |
11 |
3 |
1361 |
Of course I can leave work behind when I’m on vacation |
1.1683 |
0.03997 |
101 |
85 |
15 |
1 |
1362 |
I am training to swim with sharks. |
1.1682 |
0.04500 |
107 |
93 |
10 |
4 |
1363 |
Yeh, I just don’t feel right taking Juneteenth off. |
1.1682 |
0.03868 |
107 |
90 |
16 |
1 |
1364 |
Sir, we tried contacting you several times about your warranty now if I could just get your… |
1.1682 |
0.04090 |
107 |
91 |
14 |
2 |
1365 |
This way I can write off my pool membership as a work expense. |
1.1681 |
0.04337 |
113 |
98 |
11 |
4 |
1366 |
Working at the beach clogs up the keyboard with sand. |
1.1681 |
0.04151 |
113 |
97 |
13 |
3 |
1367 |
I used to do my best work in the bathroom until he took it over for the top secrets. |
1.1667 |
0.04806 |
90 |
78 |
9 |
3 |
1368 |
The New Yorker hasn't been the same since they moved their office to Stamford |
1.1667 |
0.04651 |
108 |
95 |
8 |
5 |
1369 |
Summer's going great so far - why do you ask? |
1.1667 |
0.05034 |
84 |
73 |
8 |
3 |
1370 |
I was tired of working from home ... and also tired of working in the office. |
1.1667 |
0.04837 |
96 |
84 |
8 |
4 |
1371 |
Your application has been submitted. |
1.1667 |
0.04055 |
108 |
92 |
14 |
2 |
1372 |
It also cuts down on bathroom breaks. |
1.1667 |
0.04478 |
114 |
100 |
9 |
5 |
1373 |
Oh, about 90 words a minute — 80 if I’m in the midst of playing Marco Polo. |
1.1667 |
0.04427 |
84 |
71 |
12 |
1 |
1374 |
It’s called a bathing suit, the tie was optional. |
1.1667 |
0.04321 |
120 |
105 |
10 |
5 |
1375 |
Would you happen to have a cell phone on you that I could borrow? |
1.1667 |
0.04255 |
90 |
76 |
13 |
1 |
1376 |
So I said, "What if I don't want a standing desk?" |
1.1667 |
0.04255 |
90 |
76 |
13 |
1 |
1377 |
I'm just treading water until I can find another job. |
1.1667 |
0.04360 |
96 |
82 |
12 |
2 |
1378 |
According to my calculations you are in over your head |
1.1667 |
0.05311 |
84 |
74 |
6 |
4 |
1379 |
Just five more minutes,dear. |
1.1667 |
0.03863 |
126 |
108 |
15 |
3 |
1380 |
I'm still getting used to working remotely. |
1.1667 |
0.04970 |
78 |
67 |
9 |
2 |
1381 |
I'm verifying your dating profile. You stated you were a former Olympic swimmer. |
1.1667 |
0.04255 |
90 |
76 |
13 |
1 |
1382 |
This lane is for laps and laptops only. |
1.1667 |
0.04837 |
96 |
84 |
8 |
4 |
1383 |
Please don't tell my wife,Larry,but I think I'm losing control of this multi-tasking thing! |
1.1667 |
0.04604 |
96 |
83 |
10 |
3 |
1384 |
Marco, I need YOU to tell me your last name. |
1.1667 |
0.05058 |
96 |
85 |
6 |
5 |
1385 |
I’m afraid you’re contractually obligated to enjoy yourself. |
1.1667 |
0.04263 |
108 |
93 |
12 |
3 |
1386 |
No worries. I'm treading water with my toes. |
1.1667 |
0.04100 |
96 |
81 |
14 |
1 |
1387 |
So when you said you specialised in water-works... |
1.1667 |
0.04806 |
90 |
78 |
9 |
3 |
1388 |
Can I offer you an upgrade? |
1.1667 |
0.03950 |
90 |
75 |
15 |
0 |
1389 |
It was sync or swim, so… |
1.1667 |
0.04539 |
90 |
77 |
11 |
2 |
1390 |
Sorry, this lane is reserved for lapTOP swimming. |
1.1667 |
0.04117 |
114 |
98 |
13 |
3 |
1391 |
Do you know what the Wi-Fi password is? |
1.1667 |
0.04055 |
108 |
92 |
14 |
2 |
1392 |
Struggling to keep my head above water this week, Dan |
1.1667 |
0.04100 |
96 |
81 |
14 |
1 |
1393 |
Oh yes, remote work has been great, if only HR would relax the dress code. |
1.1667 |
0.04100 |
96 |
81 |
14 |
1 |
1394 |
What? They told me to pool my resources. |
1.1667 |
0.04100 |
96 |
81 |
14 |
1 |
1395 |
Doing pretty well lately, thanks. Keeping my head above water and staying in my lane. |
1.1667 |
0.04539 |
90 |
77 |
11 |
2 |
1396 |
This way, I save time on going to the toilet. |
1.1667 |
0.04055 |
108 |
92 |
14 |
2 |
1397 |
Of course I’ve already rebooted. |
1.1667 |
0.04639 |
102 |
89 |
9 |
4 |
1398 |
Is this not what you meant when you said bring a suit? |
1.1667 |
0.04055 |
108 |
92 |
14 |
2 |
1399 |
I’m catching up on emails so I don’t drown in my inbox. |
1.1667 |
0.04100 |
96 |
81 |
14 |
1 |
1400 |
Bad news. We’re under water. |
1.1667 |
0.04100 |
96 |
81 |
14 |
1 |
1401 |
My boss told me to I needed to be more fluid. |
1.1667 |
0.03835 |
108 |
91 |
16 |
1 |
1402 |
If you think I work too hard, you should talk to the guy I'm standing on. |
1.1667 |
0.04806 |
90 |
78 |
9 |
3 |
1403 |
These aren’t the pooled resources I had in mind. |
1.1667 |
0.04740 |
84 |
72 |
10 |
2 |
1404 |
So long as I keep a shirt and tie on and stand close enough to the screen, they all believe I have an oceanfront… |
1.1667 |
0.05034 |
84 |
73 |
8 |
3 |
1405 |
Multitasking is a must-have skill in this current job market. |
1.1667 |
0.04539 |
90 |
77 |
11 |
2 |
1406 |
My wife told me to cool off before sending this email. |
1.1667 |
0.04740 |
84 |
72 |
10 |
2 |
1407 |
If we play our cards right, I think we can itemize your Speedo as a tax deduction |
1.1667 |
0.04301 |
114 |
99 |
11 |
4 |
1408 |
I’m not really a fan of these ‘Team Building’ trips |
1.1667 |
0.03961 |
102 |
86 |
15 |
1 |
1409 |
I find it hard to dive headfirst into vacation mode. |
1.1653 |
0.03775 |
121 |
103 |
16 |
2 |
1410 |
Do you want to dry off first or should we dive right in? |
1.1652 |
0.04266 |
115 |
100 |
11 |
4 |
1411 |
I'm on Vacation! |
1.1651 |
0.04226 |
109 |
94 |
12 |
3 |
1412 |
I've decided to take the plunge and start a business. |
1.1651 |
0.04226 |
109 |
94 |
12 |
3 |
1413 |
I went down a size, no room in the budget for two suits. |
1.1651 |
0.03803 |
109 |
92 |
16 |
1 |
1414 |
My wife wanted to go swimming, but I prefer phishing. |
1.1651 |
0.04423 |
109 |
95 |
10 |
4 |
1415 |
Well it’s not NOT uncomfortable |
1.1651 |
0.04423 |
109 |
95 |
10 |
4 |
1416 |
I'm in a Virtual Reality Room. Or else you're in a Virtual Reality Room. |
1.1650 |
0.04161 |
103 |
88 |
13 |
2 |
1417 |
I need to see the receipt for the pool .” |
1.1650 |
0.04161 |
103 |
88 |
13 |
2 |
1418 |
Thanks for taking this meeting |
1.1650 |
0.04596 |
103 |
90 |
9 |
4 |
1419 |
Is now a good time to tell you that your mortgage is under water?" |
1.1650 |
0.04384 |
103 |
89 |
11 |
3 |
1420 |
I'm Aquaman's attorney,I just need to send him quick email. |
1.1650 |
0.04161 |
103 |
88 |
13 |
2 |
1421 |
I only have a half day off. |
1.1650 |
0.04384 |
103 |
89 |
11 |
3 |
1422 |
It's the new hybrid work model. |
1.1650 |
0.04161 |
103 |
88 |
13 |
2 |
1423 |
My boss said this project would throw me into the deep end, but I’m still standing. |
1.1650 |
0.04161 |
103 |
88 |
13 |
2 |
1424 |
I have a Zoom meeting in 5, can you swim away, please? |
1.1649 |
0.04560 |
97 |
84 |
10 |
3 |
1425 |
I’m James P. Wheeler, Esq., specializing in slip and fall accidents, drownings and near drownings, drain suction entrapment incidents, and diving mishaps. |
1.1649 |
0.04318 |
97 |
83 |
12 |
2 |
1426 |
Do you think this GIF is work-appropriate? |
1.1649 |
0.04061 |
97 |
82 |
14 |
1 |
1427 |
For me recreation and work are inseparable |
1.1649 |
0.04061 |
97 |
82 |
14 |
1 |
1428 |
Sorry to bother you,but I thought you should know how your portfolio is doing. |
1.1649 |
0.04318 |
97 |
83 |
12 |
2 |
1429 |
I'm looking at clown porn |
1.1649 |
0.04789 |
97 |
85 |
8 |
4 |
1430 |
I forgot my bathing suit. |
1.1649 |
0.04318 |
97 |
83 |
12 |
2 |
1431 |
The Wi-Fi has really good wavelengths here. |
1.1648 |
0.04212 |
91 |
77 |
13 |
1 |
1432 |
Because sitting is the new smoking. |
1.1648 |
0.05006 |
91 |
80 |
7 |
4 |
1433 |
I’m more productive without the bathroom breaks |
1.1648 |
0.05245 |
91 |
81 |
5 |
5 |
1434 |
On line 27a on this year's Form 1040. why did you fail to accountmfor the $32 business lunch you had with.... |
1.1648 |
0.04492 |
91 |
78 |
11 |
2 |
1435 |
My firm doesn’t care where I work but I must wear a business attire! |
1.1648 |
0.04212 |
91 |
77 |
13 |
1 |
1436 |
Get the lifeguard, I'm drowning in work. |
1.1648 |
0.05006 |
91 |
80 |
7 |
4 |
1437 |
We can work remotely - but have to maintain the dress code. |
1.1648 |
0.04492 |
91 |
78 |
11 |
2 |
1438 |
It’s the only way to write off my gym membership. |
1.1648 |
0.04492 |
91 |
78 |
11 |
2 |
1439 |
No, it’s a toupee. And, yes, it’s waterproof. |
1.1648 |
0.04212 |
91 |
77 |
13 |
1 |
1440 |
It was suggested I get my feet wet as part of onboarding. |
1.1648 |
0.04212 |
91 |
77 |
13 |
1 |
1441 |
It going swimmingly, thanks for asking. |
1.1648 |
0.04492 |
91 |
78 |
11 |
2 |
1442 |
The company says I can work from anywhere |
1.1647 |
0.04379 |
85 |
72 |
12 |
1 |
1443 |
Why shouldn’t my pool qualify for the home office deduction? |
1.1647 |
0.04047 |
85 |
71 |
14 |
0 |
1444 |
i'm swimming in data |
1.1647 |
0.04379 |
85 |
72 |
12 |
1 |
1445 |
I’m a shark. |
1.1647 |
0.04688 |
85 |
73 |
10 |
2 |
1446 |
SPF 300 and no forever chemicals and splashproof. |
1.1647 |
0.04978 |
85 |
74 |
8 |
3 |
1447 |
I thought this was adult swim |
1.1647 |
0.05252 |
85 |
75 |
6 |
4 |
1448 |
Summer Fridays, amirite? |
1.1647 |
0.04688 |
85 |
73 |
10 |
2 |
1449 |
And if you act today, you get a free set of pool-ready-business-attire, like I'm wearing now. |
1.1647 |
0.04379 |
85 |
72 |
12 |
1 |
1450 |
I’m going for the live background screen without the screen |
1.1647 |
0.04379 |
85 |
72 |
12 |
1 |
1451 |
My boss said I could take vacation but planned meetings I had to attend |
1.1647 |
0.04978 |
85 |
74 |
8 |
3 |
1452 |
I’ve been trying to reach you about your warranty |
1.1647 |
0.04688 |
85 |
73 |
10 |
2 |
1453 |
Zoom Calls require proper business attire |
1.1646 |
0.04568 |
79 |
67 |
11 |
1 |
1454 |
Writing in a bathtub has already been done. |
1.1646 |
0.04911 |
79 |
68 |
9 |
2 |
1455 |
You never take the kids! she said... |
1.1646 |
0.05231 |
79 |
69 |
7 |
3 |
1456 |
Stay in your lane, Kevin. |
1.1646 |
0.04911 |
79 |
68 |
9 |
2 |
1457 |
This presentation is gonna make a splash. |
1.1646 |
0.04911 |
79 |
68 |
9 |
2 |
1458 |
Actually, my best event is the Key Stroke. |
1.1644 |
0.04784 |
73 |
62 |
10 |
1 |
1459 |
Yes, I'm also worried about the laptop getting wet. |
1.1638 |
0.04232 |
116 |
101 |
11 |
4 |
1460 |
I want to tell my boss that I immersed myself in this report. |
1.1638 |
0.03861 |
116 |
99 |
15 |
2 |
1461 |
I need to find a better car pool. |
1.1638 |
0.03861 |
116 |
99 |
15 |
2 |
1462 |
One more time, how do I turn off a virtual background? |
1.1638 |
0.04572 |
116 |
103 |
7 |
6 |
1463 |
They're logging my key strokes. I'm logging my back strokes. |
1.1636 |
0.04190 |
110 |
95 |
12 |
3 |
1464 |
I don't like to get it wet. |
1.1635 |
0.04555 |
104 |
91 |
9 |
4 |
1465 |
I’m fine. It’s waterproof. |
1.1635 |
0.03891 |
104 |
88 |
15 |
1 |
1466 |
Now let’s dive into those itemized deductions, shall we? |
1.1635 |
0.04345 |
104 |
90 |
11 |
3 |
1467 |
This is my idea of water aerobics. |
1.1635 |
0.03891 |
104 |
88 |
15 |
1 |
1468 |
Time is money” |
1.1635 |
0.04124 |
104 |
89 |
13 |
2 |
1469 |
My last coworking space didn't have sit-to-swim. |
1.1635 |
0.04345 |
104 |
90 |
11 |
3 |
1470 |
Water immersion takes on a whole new meaning. |
1.1633 |
0.04023 |
98 |
83 |
14 |
1 |
1471 |
This isn't bad. In the office, I'm usually under water. |
1.1633 |
0.04743 |
98 |
86 |
8 |
4 |
1472 |
It's really all about finding that work-life balance." |
1.1633 |
0.04023 |
98 |
83 |
14 |
1 |
1473 |
The title? "The Naked and the Clad." |
1.1633 |
0.04023 |
98 |
83 |
14 |
1 |
1474 |
Over it! |
1.1633 |
0.04277 |
98 |
84 |
12 |
2 |
1475 |
Wait, they have a fake background option?! |
1.1633 |
0.04743 |
98 |
86 |
8 |
4 |
1476 |
You call this swimming? You should see your debt. |
1.1633 |
0.04277 |
98 |
84 |
12 |
2 |
1477 |
I told my wife it's going to be a working vacation. |
1.1633 |
0.04023 |
98 |
83 |
14 |
1 |
1478 |
Just wanted to see what it would be like if the market flooded |
1.1633 |
0.04277 |
98 |
84 |
12 |
2 |
1479 |
Listen, with climate change this is the best summer work shared space! |
1.1633 |
0.04277 |
98 |
84 |
12 |
2 |
1480 |
Think anyone will notice me if I pee? |
1.1630 |
0.04169 |
92 |
78 |
13 |
1 |
1481 |
How did you know I'm American? |
1.1630 |
0.04708 |
92 |
80 |
9 |
3 |
1482 |
So what happened after she crossed into your lane? |
1.1630 |
0.04708 |
92 |
80 |
9 |
3 |
1483 |
But this investment is very liquid. |
1.1630 |
0.04447 |
92 |
79 |
11 |
2 |
1484 |
Business up top, bathing suit down below. |
1.1630 |
0.04169 |
92 |
78 |
13 |
1 |
1485 |
Would you say you’re Very Refreshed, Refreshed, Not Refreshed, or Don’t Know? |
1.1630 |
0.04708 |
92 |
80 |
9 |
3 |
1486 |
It looks like your assets are under water |
1.1630 |
0.04169 |
92 |
78 |
13 |
1 |
1487 |
I love remote working, and I don't even have to wear business casual! |
1.1630 |
0.04708 |
92 |
80 |
9 |
3 |
1488 |
My inbox is flooded. |
1.1628 |
0.04332 |
86 |
73 |
12 |
1 |
1489 |
Still trying to figure out my work/life balance. |
1.1628 |
0.04924 |
86 |
75 |
8 |
3 |
1490 |
Working vacation. How about you? |
1.1628 |
0.04332 |
86 |
73 |
12 |
1 |
1491 |
I'm just starting to get my feet wet |
1.1628 |
0.04637 |
86 |
74 |
10 |
2 |
1492 |
Were you thinking term or whole life? |
1.1628 |
0.04924 |
86 |
75 |
8 |
3 |
1493 |
I'm doing what I can to make a splash at work. |
1.1628 |
0.04004 |
86 |
72 |
14 |
0 |
1494 |
Yes, Stan. You’re in deep. |
1.1628 |
0.04637 |
86 |
74 |
10 |
2 |
1495 |
Hashtag WFP |
1.1628 |
0.04332 |
86 |
73 |
12 |
1 |
1496 |
I don't think the Hybrid policy is working as visualized. |
1.1626 |
0.04061 |
123 |
107 |
12 |
4 |
1497 |
It's cool; I'm in the laptop lane. |
1.1625 |
0.04853 |
80 |
69 |
9 |
2 |
1498 |
My company just announced a new work from anywhere policy |
1.1625 |
0.04151 |
80 |
67 |
13 |
0 |
1499 |
Don't worry, they can only see me from the waist up |
1.1625 |
0.04516 |
80 |
68 |
11 |
1 |
1500 |
It’s ok! They only see me from the waist up. |
1.1624 |
0.04018 |
117 |
101 |
13 |
3 |
1501 |
May I borrow your stapler? |
1.1622 |
0.05101 |
74 |
64 |
8 |
2 |
1502 |
'....came to see you about your extended car warranty'. |
1.1622 |
0.04532 |
111 |
98 |
8 |
5 |
1503 |
Why yes I *am* a remote worker. |
1.1622 |
0.04155 |
111 |
96 |
12 |
3 |
1504 |
Would you like to buy some lifeguard insurance? |
1.1619 |
0.04514 |
105 |
92 |
9 |
4 |
1505 |
Don't worry. It's waterproof. |
1.1616 |
0.04237 |
99 |
85 |
12 |
2 |
1506 |
This particular spot has the strongest Wifi. |
1.1616 |
0.04237 |
99 |
85 |
12 |
2 |
1507 |
All those folks at Starbucks on their laptops...too crowded! |
1.1616 |
0.04698 |
99 |
87 |
8 |
4 |
1508 |
please stop kicking, you're getting me wet |
1.1616 |
0.04473 |
99 |
86 |
10 |
3 |
1509 |
I put the "P" in Pool. |
1.1616 |
0.04237 |
99 |
85 |
12 |
2 |
1510 |
…and your mother’s maiden name? |
1.1616 |
0.04473 |
99 |
86 |
10 |
3 |
1511 |
No PCing in the pool. |
1.1616 |
0.04473 |
99 |
86 |
10 |
3 |
1512 |
My boss lets me work from anywhere. |
1.1616 |
0.04237 |
99 |
85 |
12 |
2 |
1513 |
Video is great—jackets are optional, and no one can tell if I’m wearing pants. |
1.1616 |
0.04237 |
99 |
85 |
12 |
2 |
1514 |
My Assets Are Underwater |
1.1613 |
0.04128 |
93 |
79 |
13 |
1 |
1515 |
I used to work from home, but I missed the human interaction. |
1.1613 |
0.04904 |
93 |
82 |
7 |
4 |
1516 |
Yes, I'm a little out of the swim. |
1.1613 |
0.04402 |
93 |
80 |
11 |
2 |
1517 |
The lifeguard is working remote. |
1.1613 |
0.04904 |
93 |
82 |
7 |
4 |
1518 |
Excuse me, this a private Zoom call. |
1.1613 |
0.04402 |
93 |
80 |
11 |
2 |
1519 |
It's the new waterproof lapstop model. |
1.1613 |
0.04128 |
93 |
79 |
13 |
1 |
1520 |
How would you rank your swimming satisfaction on a scale from 1 to 10 "? |
1.1613 |
0.04128 |
93 |
79 |
13 |
1 |
1521 |
Low-impact standing desk. You should try it. |
1.1613 |
0.04128 |
93 |
79 |
13 |
1 |
1522 |
I'm a wet-collar worker. |
1.1613 |
0.04402 |
93 |
80 |
11 |
2 |
1523 |
They only gave us Swimmer Fridays this year |
1.1613 |
0.04128 |
93 |
79 |
13 |
1 |
1524 |
Nah. I just tell them it's a new background. |
1.1613 |
0.04904 |
93 |
82 |
7 |
4 |
1525 |
That completes the survey would you like to sign up for the newsletter? |
1.1610 |
0.04164 |
118 |
103 |
11 |
4 |
1526 |
The nice thing about working on this pool side is that I don’t need to take bathroom breaks. |
1.1609 |
0.04588 |
87 |
75 |
10 |
2 |
1527 |
Promised my wife i’d get in the pool if she let me work on vacation! |
1.1609 |
0.04588 |
87 |
75 |
10 |
2 |
1528 |
Yeah, I know. It's a weird spot for the club to have its 'hot spot', but what can I do? |
1.1609 |
0.04588 |
87 |
75 |
10 |
2 |
1529 |
If you do what you love, you'll never swim a day in your life. |
1.1609 |
0.04870 |
87 |
76 |
8 |
3 |
1530 |
It's the methodology portion of my dissertation on thalassophobia. |
1.1609 |
0.04870 |
87 |
76 |
8 |
3 |
1531 |
This used to be the secretarial pool. |
1.1609 |
0.04286 |
87 |
74 |
12 |
1 |
1532 |
I need to get this report finished before I prune. |
1.1609 |
0.04870 |
87 |
76 |
8 |
3 |
1533 |
This is the only way I'm ever going to get into this water. |
1.1609 |
0.04870 |
87 |
76 |
8 |
3 |
1534 |
I was missing our chats around the water cooler. |
1.1609 |
0.04870 |
87 |
76 |
8 |
3 |
1535 |
You’ll have to leave if you get a hard drive. |
1.1609 |
0.04588 |
87 |
75 |
10 |
2 |
1536 |
With new clients I just like to dive right in. |
1.1609 |
0.04588 |
87 |
75 |
10 |
2 |
1537 |
It’s all about efficiency, Ron. This way I eliminated my commute to the gym after work. |
1.1609 |
0.04286 |
87 |
74 |
12 |
1 |
1538 |
When you’re ready, this document will need a wet signature. |
1.1609 |
0.03962 |
87 |
73 |
14 |
0 |
1539 |
My editor told me to immerse myself in my next book. |
1.1607 |
0.04120 |
112 |
97 |
12 |
3 |
1540 |
I thought I'd do a dry run first. |
1.1607 |
0.03920 |
112 |
96 |
14 |
2 |
1541 |
So, about those boxes in the pool house... |
1.1607 |
0.04494 |
112 |
99 |
8 |
5 |
1542 |
AC is down again in your office, huh Carl? |
1.1607 |
0.04311 |
112 |
98 |
10 |
4 |
1543 |
In fact after the home office deduction it pays for itself. |
1.1605 |
0.04464 |
81 |
69 |
11 |
1 |
1544 |
I'd love to be able to just enjoy myself, but I'm drowning in work right now. |
1.1605 |
0.04797 |
81 |
70 |
9 |
2 |
1545 |
Charlie, did you know that your vehicle warranty is about to expire? |
1.1605 |
0.05403 |
81 |
72 |
5 |
4 |
1546 |
It’s a hybrid remote position. |
1.1605 |
0.04464 |
81 |
69 |
11 |
1 |
1547 |
Sync or swim is feeling much more literal these days. |
1.1605 |
0.05403 |
81 |
72 |
5 |
4 |
1548 |
I thought you said you were underwater, Dave |
1.1605 |
0.05109 |
81 |
71 |
7 |
3 |
1549 |
I just joined the office pool — I’m Wade |
1.1604 |
0.04052 |
106 |
91 |
13 |
2 |
1550 |
I’m getting too old to surf the web. These days, I just paddle the web. |
1.1604 |
0.04268 |
106 |
92 |
11 |
3 |
1551 |
The secret, my friend, is knowing how to mix business with pleaure. |
1.1600 |
0.05037 |
75 |
65 |
8 |
2 |
1552 |
Did you say our stocks reached the high water mark? |
1.1600 |
0.04197 |
100 |
86 |
12 |
2 |
1553 |
I needed physical therapy but couldn't get time off work. |
1.1600 |
0.05037 |
75 |
65 |
8 |
2 |
1554 |
I promised the kids. |
1.1600 |
0.04431 |
100 |
87 |
10 |
3 |
1555 |
Just getting my feet wet in this new job. |
1.1600 |
0.04654 |
100 |
88 |
8 |
4 |
1556 |
I fell for another phishing scam. |
1.1600 |
0.03949 |
100 |
85 |
14 |
1 |
1557 |
I’m bring back the Liquid Lunch. |
1.1600 |
0.04431 |
100 |
87 |
10 |
3 |
1558 |
What qualities would you say make you a good fit for the deep end? |
1.1596 |
0.04358 |
94 |
81 |
11 |
2 |
1559 |
Since swimming here would you say that your quality of life is: Much Better, Better, Neither Better Nor Worse, Worse, or Much Worse. |
1.1596 |
0.04088 |
94 |
80 |
13 |
1 |
1560 |
The problem with remote work is the work part. |
1.1596 |
0.04358 |
94 |
81 |
11 |
2 |
1561 |
They need this presentation to make a splash |
1.1596 |
0.04613 |
94 |
82 |
9 |
3 |
1562 |
52 second lap time...now we just need a blood test, and your apartment application will be complete |
1.1596 |
0.04613 |
94 |
82 |
9 |
3 |
1563 |
Is this the secretarial pool? |
1.1596 |
0.04358 |
94 |
81 |
11 |
2 |
1564 |
Well, I am an insurance underwriter trainee and will soon be working in US coastal areas where I will cancel flood insurance coverage. |
1.1596 |
0.04613 |
94 |
82 |
9 |
3 |
1565 |
I fear this isn’t what my boss meant by “let’s dive in” |
1.1596 |
0.04613 |
94 |
82 |
9 |
3 |
1566 |
Sorry, I misheard you about exploring your pooled liquid assets. |
1.1596 |
0.04613 |
94 |
82 |
9 |
3 |
1567 |
I showered before getting in. |
1.1596 |
0.04088 |
94 |
80 |
13 |
1 |
1568 |
Beats the morning commute, eh? |
1.1596 |
0.04613 |
94 |
82 |
9 |
3 |
1569 |
I thought I was signing up for a car pool. |
1.1593 |
0.04086 |
113 |
98 |
12 |
3 |
1570 |
asynchronous work |
1.1593 |
0.04086 |
113 |
98 |
12 |
3 |
1571 |
I really feel at home in the water |
1.1593 |
0.04275 |
113 |
99 |
10 |
4 |
1572 |
Would you participate in a brief survey after we're done? |
1.1591 |
0.04818 |
88 |
77 |
8 |
3 |
1573 |
My physical therapist prescribed an hour a day in the pool. |
1.1591 |
0.04539 |
88 |
76 |
10 |
2 |
1574 |
Your critical insurance needs take no holiday. |
1.1591 |
0.04241 |
88 |
75 |
12 |
1 |
1575 |
This is my only bad habit. |
1.1591 |
0.04818 |
88 |
77 |
8 |
3 |
1576 |
I'm deviating from generally accepted accounting principles. |
1.1591 |
0.04539 |
88 |
76 |
10 |
2 |
1577 |
The office pool has become incredibly overcrowded. |
1.1591 |
0.04539 |
88 |
76 |
10 |
2 |
1578 |
Maintaining my work-life balance has always been a priority for me. |
1.1591 |
0.04818 |
88 |
77 |
8 |
3 |
1579 |
And would you say the pool has improved your fitness a little, somewhat, or a lot? |
1.1591 |
0.04539 |
88 |
76 |
10 |
2 |
1580 |
It's the latest TikTok trend |
1.1591 |
0.04818 |
88 |
77 |
8 |
3 |
1581 |
Unlike your typical lifeguard, I’m more than just a piece of meat. |
1.1591 |
0.05572 |
88 |
80 |
2 |
6 |
1582 |
Be creative, don't hold back, jump in with all you've got and you will start to see results immediately, they said... Any minute now... |
1.1591 |
0.04539 |
88 |
76 |
10 |
2 |
1583 |
I'm known for my dry humor. |
1.1589 |
0.04231 |
107 |
93 |
11 |
3 |
1584 |
As you clearly see, I've not gone off the deep end. |
1.1589 |
0.04231 |
107 |
93 |
11 |
3 |
1585 |
Zoom. They can’t tell I’m wearing swim trunks. |
1.1589 |
0.04434 |
107 |
94 |
9 |
4 |
1586 |
New work-from-pool policy. |
1.1589 |
0.03791 |
107 |
91 |
15 |
1 |
1587 |
I’m practicing for the 100m keystroke. |
1.1589 |
0.04434 |
107 |
94 |
9 |
4 |
1588 |
Looks like all our assets are liquid. |
1.1589 |
0.03791 |
107 |
91 |
15 |
1 |
1589 |
The business center was closed due to flooding. |
1.1589 |
0.03791 |
107 |
91 |
15 |
1 |
1590 |
They did say I'd be working in the fast lane |
1.1585 |
0.04743 |
82 |
71 |
9 |
2 |
1591 |
Lemme guess, drowning in e-mails? |
1.1585 |
0.04414 |
82 |
70 |
11 |
1 |
1592 |
I am searching for a YouTube on what to wear and what to do in a swimming pool. I don't know how else I can find out about these things. |
1.1585 |
0.04743 |
82 |
71 |
9 |
2 |
1593 |
they said I would drown in my work... |
1.1585 |
0.05050 |
82 |
72 |
7 |
3 |
1594 |
It appears that the Deep State has moved to the shallow end. |
1.1585 |
0.05050 |
82 |
72 |
7 |
3 |
1595 |
Just wait till I get in over my head. |
1.1585 |
0.05050 |
82 |
72 |
7 |
3 |
1596 |
To be a participant observer, you have to blend in. |
1.1585 |
0.04743 |
82 |
71 |
9 |
2 |
1597 |
We’ll be in touch. As you can see, we have a very qualified pool of applicants. |
1.1585 |
0.04414 |
82 |
70 |
11 |
1 |
1598 |
This is what I love about Zoom. |
1.1585 |
0.04414 |
82 |
70 |
11 |
1 |
1599 |
You want the rider for accidental drowning? |
1.1585 |
0.04743 |
82 |
71 |
9 |
2 |
1600 |
Sorry Bob, but I think you’re taking the ‘casual’ in “business casual” a bit too literally |
1.1585 |
0.04058 |
82 |
69 |
13 |
0 |
1601 |
Summer hours.” |
1.1585 |
0.04414 |
82 |
70 |
11 |
1 |
1602 |
We were asked to pool our resources even while working remotely. |
1.1585 |
0.05050 |
82 |
72 |
7 |
3 |
1603 |
Multitasking. Why do you ask? |
1.1584 |
0.03913 |
101 |
86 |
14 |
1 |
1604 |
...You know you can 'yell-for-help' online? |
1.1584 |
0.04820 |
101 |
90 |
6 |
5 |
1605 |
We have a flexible work from home policy. |
1.1584 |
0.04158 |
101 |
87 |
12 |
2 |
1606 |
My boss limits bathroom breaks so I work from here." |
1.1583 |
0.04099 |
120 |
105 |
11 |
4 |
1607 |
Well, the good news is that your investments are quite liquid. |
1.1579 |
0.04048 |
95 |
81 |
13 |
1 |
1608 |
The lifeguard will be on the computer screen soon to watch you. |
1.1579 |
0.04568 |
95 |
83 |
9 |
3 |
1609 |
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the strongest, how would you rate your irritation at a person blocking your swimming lane to administer a survey about enjoyment of swimming? |
1.1579 |
0.04568 |
95 |
83 |
9 |
3 |
1610 |
My event is keystroke. |
1.1579 |
0.04048 |
95 |
81 |
13 |
1 |
1611 |
I do all my surfing in a wetsuit. |
1.1579 |
0.04419 |
114 |
101 |
8 |
5 |
1612 |
Everyone will think it´s a virtual background. |
1.1579 |
0.04316 |
95 |
82 |
11 |
2 |
1613 |
I guess the office pool is different at Google. |
1.1579 |
0.04568 |
95 |
83 |
9 |
3 |
1614 |
Do you mind? I'm on a tight deadline. |
1.1579 |
0.04568 |
95 |
83 |
9 |
3 |
1615 |
Working from the pool was the next logical move. |
1.1579 |
0.04316 |
95 |
82 |
11 |
2 |
1616 |
We thought we'd try something different this year
with the office pool. |
1.1579 |
0.04568 |
95 |
83 |
9 |
3 |
1617 |
I try to take full advantage of our summer hours policy. |
1.1579 |
0.04316 |
95 |
82 |
11 |
2 |
1618 |
I'm working on my work-life balance. |
1.1579 |
0.04568 |
95 |
83 |
9 |
3 |
1619 |
Well if you know a better way to pee during a zoom meeting I’d love to hear it” |
1.1579 |
0.04807 |
95 |
84 |
7 |
4 |
1620 |
Don't worry I've blurred by background |
1.1575 |
0.03779 |
127 |
110 |
14 |
3 |
1621 |
I was never much for exercise, but I enjoy the camaraderie |
1.1574 |
0.03982 |
108 |
93 |
13 |
2 |
1622 |
I'm scheduling my next swim. |
1.1574 |
0.04395 |
108 |
95 |
9 |
4 |
1623 |
Practicing my keystroke. What does it look like? |
1.1574 |
0.04395 |
108 |
95 |
9 |
4 |
1624 |
Because it's more fun than working from home. |
1.1573 |
0.04491 |
89 |
77 |
10 |
2 |
1625 |
I'm here for the swim-up-Bar Association meeting, why do you ask? |
1.1573 |
0.04197 |
89 |
76 |
12 |
1 |
1626 |
I hate being interrupted. |
1.1573 |
0.04197 |
89 |
76 |
12 |
1 |
1627 |
I like working from home. |
1.1573 |
0.04767 |
89 |
78 |
8 |
3 |
1628 |
My company has a strict dress code. |
1.1573 |
0.04767 |
89 |
78 |
8 |
3 |
1629 |
I'm an accountant. I'm dry inside." |
1.1573 |
0.04767 |
89 |
78 |
8 |
3 |
1630 |
Oh it’s… just a background… |
1.1573 |
0.04197 |
89 |
76 |
12 |
1 |
1631 |
I’ve gotten a lot of compliments on my new Zoom background. |
1.1573 |
0.04197 |
89 |
76 |
12 |
1 |
1632 |
'Could you watch my laptop while I get out to urinate?' |
1.1569 |
0.04120 |
102 |
88 |
12 |
2 |
1633 |
The company's under water! |
1.1569 |
0.04350 |
102 |
89 |
10 |
3 |
1634 |
I’m working from home, and there’s no air conditioning. |
1.1569 |
0.04120 |
102 |
88 |
12 |
2 |
1635 |
I wanted to get some strokes in. |
1.1569 |
0.03878 |
102 |
87 |
14 |
1 |
1636 |
The probablility is less than .01 that you peed in the pool. |
1.1569 |
0.04120 |
102 |
88 |
12 |
2 |
1637 |
The office bathroom has been closed all week. |
1.1569 |
0.03878 |
102 |
87 |
14 |
1 |
1638 |
I got kicked out of the office pool. |
1.1569 |
0.04567 |
102 |
90 |
8 |
4 |
1639 |
No worries, my mouse is a good swimmer |
1.1569 |
0.04120 |
102 |
88 |
12 |
2 |
1640 |
The boss said I could go to the pool during lunch,
as long as he gets this spreadsheet on time. |
1.1566 |
0.04992 |
83 |
73 |
7 |
3 |
1641 |
It's important to have a good work-life balance. |
1.1566 |
0.04992 |
83 |
73 |
7 |
3 |
1642 |
I miss casual Fridays. |
1.1566 |
0.04689 |
83 |
72 |
9 |
2 |
1643 |
I was told we have a hydrate work environment. |
1.1566 |
0.04689 |
83 |
72 |
9 |
2 |
1644 |
Seriously, where else can you find a ‘clothing optional’ spa with decent Wifi? |
1.1566 |
0.04689 |
83 |
72 |
9 |
2 |
1645 |
We're swimming in debt Walter, I'm just trying to keep my head above water |
1.1566 |
0.04689 |
83 |
72 |
9 |
2 |
1646 |
I read online that water is relaxing. |
1.1566 |
0.04364 |
83 |
71 |
11 |
1 |
1647 |
It’s a Great company to work for. Nobody gets in hot water. |
1.1566 |
0.04689 |
83 |
72 |
9 |
2 |
1648 |
Get a remote job, they said. It’d be fun, they said. |
1.1566 |
0.04364 |
83 |
71 |
11 |
1 |
1649 |
I'm praying it will meet with a watery grave. |
1.1562 |
0.04523 |
96 |
84 |
9 |
3 |
1650 |
I am relaxing. I’m wearing jorts. |
1.1562 |
0.04274 |
96 |
83 |
11 |
2 |
1651 |
That's not my urine. It's a hot spot. |
1.1562 |
0.04759 |
96 |
85 |
7 |
4 |
1652 |
I am programming the AI lifeguard to save you from drowning. |
1.1562 |
0.04009 |
96 |
82 |
13 |
1 |
1653 |
I thought I was doing well at my job, but it turns out I was only treading water. |
1.1562 |
0.04009 |
96 |
82 |
13 |
1 |
1654 |
I know the remake was a flop, but wait'll they see The Little Sherman. |
1.1562 |
0.03725 |
96 |
81 |
15 |
0 |
1655 |
I’m almost done setting up the virtual lifeguard |
1.1562 |
0.04274 |
96 |
83 |
11 |
2 |
1656 |
This is my summer standing desk |
1.1562 |
0.04274 |
96 |
83 |
11 |
2 |
1657 |
I'm liquidating your assets. |
1.1560 |
0.03727 |
109 |
93 |
15 |
1 |
1658 |
The hardest part of synchronized swimming is keeping the computer dry. |
1.1560 |
0.04158 |
109 |
95 |
11 |
3 |
1659 |
My work-life balance is barely above water |
1.1560 |
0.04158 |
109 |
95 |
11 |
3 |
1660 |
I couldn't get a thing done at the office. |
1.1560 |
0.03948 |
109 |
94 |
13 |
2 |
1661 |
We've been trying to reach you concerning your cars warranty. |
1.1560 |
0.04548 |
109 |
97 |
7 |
5 |
1662 |
The a/c broke in my apartment. OK? |
1.1560 |
0.03948 |
109 |
94 |
13 |
2 |
1663 |
Sorry — I'm early for nerd swim." |
1.1558 |
0.04914 |
77 |
67 |
8 |
2 |
1664 |
How many bedrooms you need? |
1.1558 |
0.04553 |
77 |
66 |
10 |
1 |
1665 |
I think I brought the wrong suit. |
1.1558 |
0.04914 |
77 |
67 |
8 |
2 |
1666 |
My boss warned me about getting in deep water with clients. |
1.1558 |
0.04914 |
77 |
67 |
8 |
2 |
1667 |
God, I love working remotely. |
1.1556 |
0.04444 |
90 |
78 |
10 |
2 |
1668 |
Somebody has to manage this. |
1.1556 |
0.04444 |
90 |
78 |
10 |
2 |
1669 |
I just wanted a change of scenery. |
1.1556 |
0.04717 |
90 |
79 |
8 |
3 |
1670 |
Stay in your lane, buddy, and I'll stay in mine. |
1.1556 |
0.04154 |
90 |
77 |
12 |
1 |
1671 |
My father raised me to have no fun. |
1.1556 |
0.04717 |
90 |
79 |
8 |
3 |
1672 |
My company no longer allows working from home, but I found a loophole. |
1.1556 |
0.04717 |
90 |
79 |
8 |
3 |
1673 |
Work is going swimmingly in case anyone asks. |
1.1556 |
0.04154 |
90 |
77 |
12 |
1 |
1674 |
This is me not returning to the office. |
1.1556 |
0.04717 |
90 |
79 |
8 |
3 |
1675 |
I don't like to get my hair wet. |
1.1556 |
0.04154 |
90 |
77 |
12 |
1 |
1676 |
Oh yes I am on holiday but I’m American so just need to hop on a quick zoom call |
1.1556 |
0.04975 |
90 |
80 |
6 |
4 |
1677 |
I finally got approved for a hybrid work schedule. |
1.1556 |
0.04444 |
90 |
78 |
10 |
2 |
1678 |
Our firm has a great work-life balance. |
1.1556 |
0.04154 |
90 |
77 |
12 |
1 |
1679 |
Hydrotherapy is sometimes deductible, pickleball no dice... |
1.1556 |
0.04444 |
90 |
78 |
10 |
2 |
1680 |
I’m working remote from the pool |
1.1556 |
0.04154 |
90 |
77 |
12 |
1 |
1681 |
Just one more email… |
1.1556 |
0.04154 |
90 |
77 |
12 |
1 |
1682 |
I’m saving the rest of my paid leave for a much needed staycation |
1.1556 |
0.04444 |
90 |
78 |
10 |
2 |
1683 |
Swimming is the new standing |
1.1556 |
0.04444 |
90 |
78 |
10 |
2 |
1684 |
I’m trying to spend less time on my phone |
1.1556 |
0.04717 |
90 |
79 |
8 |
3 |
1685 |
This email is either going to sink or swim. |
1.1556 |
0.04154 |
90 |
77 |
12 |
1 |
1686 |
Oh, you should see what I billed the client I met with on K2. |
1.1553 |
0.04310 |
103 |
90 |
10 |
3 |
1687 |
You never know when the office has a video conference. |
1.1553 |
0.04310 |
103 |
90 |
10 |
3 |
1688 |
I find it stimulating to be around people not making money. |
1.1553 |
0.04083 |
103 |
89 |
12 |
2 |
1689 |
I'm checking up on my employees who claim that they're working from home. |
1.1553 |
0.04083 |
103 |
89 |
12 |
2 |
1690 |
It's a new concept called WePool. |
1.1553 |
0.04525 |
103 |
91 |
8 |
4 |
1691 |
It says that Amazon can get the bathing suit here in 6 hours. |
1.1553 |
0.04310 |
103 |
90 |
10 |
3 |
1692 |
These meetings are always scheduled at the worst time. |
1.1553 |
0.04310 |
103 |
90 |
10 |
3 |
1693 |
They asked why I was working from the poolside. I told them the Wi-Fi was bad in the deep-end |
1.1553 |
0.03587 |
103 |
87 |
16 |
0 |
1694 |
I'm Trump's new lawyer, as you can see I'm not out of my depth. |
1.1553 |
0.04928 |
103 |
93 |
4 |
6 |
1695 |
I tried calling you about your car’s extended warranty. |
1.1553 |
0.04310 |
103 |
90 |
10 |
3 |
1696 |
When I was invited to join the office pool, I assumed they meant betting. |
1.1553 |
0.04731 |
103 |
92 |
6 |
5 |
1697 |
Had hemorrhoid surgery, but still need to work |
1.1549 |
0.05548 |
71 |
63 |
5 |
3 |
1698 |
I'm multitasking. |
1.1548 |
0.04316 |
84 |
72 |
11 |
1 |
1699 |
Do you know how to change the background on Zoom? |
1.1548 |
0.04936 |
84 |
74 |
7 |
3 |
1700 |
Liquidity is a key factor in your pooled funds. |
1.1548 |
0.04936 |
84 |
74 |
7 |
3 |
1701 |
I try to meet my clients where they are. |
1.1548 |
0.04316 |
84 |
72 |
11 |
1 |
1702 |
Plaintiff says it's only been twenty-seven minutes since you finished lunch. |
1.1548 |
0.04637 |
84 |
73 |
9 |
2 |
1703 |
This way I don’t have to use any vacation hours. |
1.1548 |
0.04637 |
84 |
73 |
9 |
2 |
1704 |
I'm sticking it to the man. He thinks I'm working from home. |
1.1548 |
0.04316 |
84 |
72 |
11 |
1 |
1705 |
If it cures my writer's block, who am I to judge? |
1.1548 |
0.04637 |
84 |
73 |
9 |
2 |
1706 |
This way I don’t have to stop working to urinate |
1.1548 |
0.04936 |
84 |
74 |
7 |
3 |
1707 |
Yes, club dues are deductible, but fees associated with lessons or equipment such as floaties, kickboards, goggles, etc. are not. |
1.1548 |
0.04637 |
84 |
73 |
9 |
2 |
1708 |
Take a seat. I'll be right with you. |
1.1546 |
0.04232 |
97 |
84 |
11 |
2 |
1709 |
The background is perfect as long as I stay muted. |
1.1546 |
0.04479 |
97 |
85 |
9 |
3 |
1710 |
I got tired of my treadmill desk. |
1.1546 |
0.04232 |
97 |
84 |
11 |
2 |
1711 |
I started writing my novel before they filled the pool. |
1.1546 |
0.04232 |
97 |
84 |
11 |
2 |
1712 |
We're still working from home, but the boss didn't change the dress code. |
1.1546 |
0.04479 |
97 |
85 |
9 |
3 |
1713 |
Those are not my bubbles! |
1.1546 |
0.04232 |
97 |
84 |
11 |
2 |
1714 |
We’re piloting summer Fridays. |
1.1546 |
0.04232 |
97 |
84 |
11 |
2 |
1715 |
I want to make sure I'm respecting your personal time |
1.1546 |
0.04935 |
97 |
87 |
5 |
5 |
1716 |
Thank you for agreeing to meet in the shallow end, Ted. |
1.1545 |
0.04509 |
110 |
98 |
7 |
5 |
1717 |
My chiropractor highly recommended switching to a swimming desk. |
1.1545 |
0.04122 |
110 |
96 |
11 |
3 |
1718 |
And you said you swim twice weekly? That will enable us to offer a substantial premium reduction. |
1.1538 |
0.04271 |
104 |
91 |
10 |
3 |
1719 |
The corner Starbucks is closed, so this was the closest place with free Wi-Fi. |
1.1538 |
0.04112 |
91 |
78 |
12 |
1 |
1720 |
In addition to this spa membership, we can also write off your swimming trunks and towel. |
1.1538 |
0.04855 |
78 |
68 |
8 |
2 |
1721 |
The boss told me to keep my head above water. |
1.1538 |
0.04046 |
104 |
90 |
12 |
2 |
1722 |
Working on my keystroke. |
1.1538 |
0.04271 |
104 |
91 |
10 |
3 |
1723 |
Technically, it's a working vacation. |
1.1538 |
0.04112 |
91 |
78 |
12 |
1 |
1724 |
It's a half workday. |
1.1538 |
0.03803 |
91 |
77 |
14 |
0 |
1725 |
I ran out of sunscreen. |
1.1538 |
0.04668 |
91 |
80 |
8 |
3 |
1726 |
They said let’s all meet in the typing pool and I’m the first to arrive. |
1.1538 |
0.04498 |
78 |
67 |
10 |
1 |
1727 |
Even with the medical deduction, you are underwater with this therapeutic pool. |
1.1538 |
0.04668 |
91 |
80 |
8 |
3 |
1728 |
Why yes,I am a bathing suit |
1.1538 |
0.04046 |
104 |
90 |
12 |
2 |
1729 |
Not the typing pool? |
1.1538 |
0.03764 |
117 |
101 |
14 |
2 |
1730 |
If you bundle your home and auto, I can save you 15%. |
1.1538 |
0.04112 |
91 |
78 |
12 |
1 |
1731 |
I'm just like the duck, all serene above the water, but paddling for all I'm worth below the surface! |
1.1538 |
0.04399 |
91 |
79 |
10 |
2 |
1732 |
My company allows remote work but requires business attire. |
1.1538 |
0.04923 |
91 |
81 |
6 |
4 |
1733 |
I’m merely integrating leisure activity into my life. |
1.1538 |
0.04668 |
91 |
80 |
8 |
3 |
1734 |
"On a scale of 1-to-10, how likely is it that you would wear a suit-shaped wet suit?" |
1.1538 |
0.04668 |
91 |
80 |
8 |
3 |
1735 |
I thought it might improve our liquidity situation. |
1.1538 |
0.04112 |
91 |
78 |
12 |
1 |
1736 |
Go Phish |
1.1538 |
0.04399 |
91 |
79 |
10 |
2 |
1737 |
They love my backgrounds |
1.1532 |
0.03665 |
111 |
95 |
15 |
1 |
1738 |
You're in the lap lane. |
1.1532 |
0.04087 |
111 |
97 |
11 |
3 |
1739 |
Hamiltub...an aquatic adaptation of the Founding Fathers |
1.1531 |
0.04436 |
98 |
86 |
9 |
3 |
1740 |
They told me to use the secretarial pool |
1.1531 |
0.04436 |
98 |
86 |
9 |
3 |
1741 |
Yes, my job is 100% remote but they still expect me to wear a tie during business hours |
1.1531 |
0.04192 |
98 |
85 |
11 |
2 |
1742 |
Genius Bar, now accepting reservations pool side. |
1.1531 |
0.04667 |
98 |
87 |
7 |
4 |
1743 |
Some of my friends go as far as to call me a workaholic. |
1.1531 |
0.04192 |
98 |
85 |
11 |
2 |
1744 |
You do your reps. I AM a rep. |
1.1531 |
0.03656 |
98 |
83 |
15 |
0 |
1745 |
I'm a digital naiad. |
1.1531 |
0.04192 |
98 |
85 |
11 |
2 |
1746 |
Computer says, ‘no’. |
1.1531 |
0.04436 |
98 |
86 |
9 |
3 |
1747 |
I'm working on my strokes per minute |
1.1531 |
0.03933 |
98 |
84 |
13 |
1 |
1748 |
I’m sticking it to the man, I CAN work from anywhere. |
1.1531 |
0.03933 |
98 |
84 |
13 |
1 |
1749 |
I'm scoping out the talent pool. |
1.1529 |
0.04269 |
85 |
73 |
11 |
1 |
1750 |
My manager said I should work on staying in my lane. |
1.1529 |
0.04269 |
85 |
73 |
11 |
1 |
1751 |
I find that I do my best work until the starter's gun goes off. |
1.1529 |
0.04585 |
85 |
74 |
9 |
2 |
1752 |
I find it makes it easier to track trends in market fluidity. |
1.1529 |
0.04881 |
85 |
75 |
7 |
3 |
1753 |
Amazon can deliver a toaster here same-day. |
1.1529 |
0.04585 |
85 |
74 |
9 |
2 |
1754 |
This way I can deduct my pool fees as a business expense.” |
1.1529 |
0.04881 |
85 |
75 |
7 |
3 |
1755 |
I’m mitigating the AI risks of this Adult Swim. |
1.1529 |
0.03927 |
85 |
72 |
13 |
0 |
1756 |
Have you tried getting out of the pool and getting back in again? |
1.1529 |
0.04881 |
85 |
75 |
7 |
3 |
1757 |
And how long have you been noticing this smell of chlorine, Mr. Polo? |
1.1529 |
0.05160 |
85 |
76 |
5 |
4 |
1758 |
I just aim the camera upwards a little and nobody knows. |
1.1529 |
0.04585 |
85 |
74 |
9 |
2 |
1759 |
It's a swim-up desk. |
1.1529 |
0.04269 |
85 |
73 |
11 |
1 |
1760 |
The computer takes care of the background,but I have to wear a necktie when I zoom for an office conference. |
1.1529 |
0.04585 |
85 |
74 |
9 |
2 |
1761 |
I’m trying to normalize Public Displays of Accounting. |
1.1529 |
0.04881 |
85 |
75 |
7 |
3 |
1762 |
My boss warned me that I'd be swimming in work on my vacation. |
1.1529 |
0.03927 |
85 |
72 |
13 |
0 |
1763 |
I prefer to be a tech savvy fish in a medium sized lap pool. |
1.1529 |
0.04585 |
85 |
74 |
9 |
2 |
1764 |
I know you’re busy but did you see where my swimsuit went. |
1.1529 |
0.04269 |
85 |
73 |
11 |
1 |
1765 |
Why yes, Bob. I am teaching summer school this year. What gave it away? |
1.1529 |
0.04585 |
85 |
74 |
9 |
2 |
1766 |
This is the only place with good wifi |
1.1528 |
0.05104 |
72 |
63 |
7 |
2 |
1767 |
I’m one of the pool’s new life insurance guards. |
1.1528 |
0.05104 |
72 |
63 |
7 |
2 |
1768 |
When I said I’d meet you where you’re at, I meant it . |
1.1528 |
0.04706 |
72 |
62 |
9 |
1 |
1769 |
Yes, I know it’s a lap lane. That’s why I brought my laptop. |
1.1528 |
0.05474 |
72 |
64 |
5 |
3 |
1770 |
These Vision Pros make it appear like I'm wearing regular glasses;
so I don't look silly..., |
1.1524 |
0.04232 |
105 |
92 |
10 |
3 |
1771 |
Not right now...I'm swimming in work. |
1.1524 |
0.04444 |
105 |
93 |
8 |
4 |
1772 |
I promised my wife I wouldn’t let work interfere with our vacation. |
1.1524 |
0.04232 |
105 |
92 |
10 |
3 |
1773 |
I love my remote job |
1.1524 |
0.04010 |
105 |
91 |
12 |
2 |
1774 |
It's a working holiday. |
1.1524 |
0.03524 |
105 |
89 |
16 |
0 |
1775 |
Isn’t it amazing how much freedom HomeOffice gave us? |
1.1524 |
0.04232 |
105 |
92 |
10 |
3 |
1776 |
It's called a working vacation. |
1.1522 |
0.04354 |
92 |
80 |
10 |
2 |
1777 |
So, did he bump into your rear or did you back up into his front |
1.1522 |
0.04354 |
92 |
80 |
10 |
2 |
1778 |
Jim, i’m worried Parker may be getting in over his head on this one. |
1.1522 |
0.04620 |
92 |
81 |
8 |
3 |
1779 |
It’s a little late to opt in for the flood insurance….. |
1.1522 |
0.04070 |
92 |
79 |
12 |
1 |
1780 |
I'm a bit of a workaholic. |
1.1522 |
0.04070 |
92 |
79 |
12 |
1 |
1781 |
You can have the lane once I finish this email. |
1.1522 |
0.03765 |
92 |
78 |
14 |
0 |
1782 |
As your lawyer, I would advise you to tread water lightly. |
1.1522 |
0.03765 |
92 |
78 |
14 |
0 |
1783 |
What makes you think I’m not relaxed? |
1.1522 |
0.04070 |
92 |
79 |
12 |
1 |
1784 |
I'm using pooled data |
1.1522 |
0.04354 |
92 |
80 |
10 |
2 |
1785 |
I wanted to continue at home. My boss wanted me back in the office.
We compromised. |
1.1522 |
0.04354 |
92 |
80 |
10 |
2 |
1786 |
I'm trying to do fun and office at the same time. |
1.1522 |
0.04872 |
92 |
82 |
6 |
4 |
1787 |
Jerry, now that we’re back to work you need to wear a suit. |
1.1522 |
0.04354 |
92 |
80 |
10 |
2 |
1788 |
Double duty, lifeguard shortage. |
1.1522 |
0.04354 |
92 |
80 |
10 |
2 |
1789 |
It's the next generation of standing desk. |
1.1522 |
0.04620 |
92 |
81 |
8 |
3 |
1790 |
Wait, this isn't how you add a background on Zoom? |
1.1522 |
0.04620 |
92 |
81 |
8 |
3 |
1791 |
keep it down you guys, I'm in hot water as it is. |
1.1522 |
0.04354 |
92 |
80 |
10 |
2 |
1792 |
You just don’t understand Bitcoin. |
1.1522 |
0.04354 |
92 |
80 |
10 |
2 |
1793 |
No, the virtual background blocks out the pool. |
1.1522 |
0.04070 |
92 |
79 |
12 |
1 |
1794 |
I was forced to swim nude with other boys in 7th grade. It was quite damaging and now I blog about the path I took to heal. |
1.1519 |
0.04797 |
79 |
69 |
8 |
2 |
1795 |
Wi-fi's better here. |
1.1519 |
0.04445 |
79 |
68 |
10 |
1 |
1796 |
You call it OCD. I call it multitasking. |
1.1519 |
0.04797 |
79 |
69 |
8 |
2 |
1797 |
I used up all of my PTO. |
1.1519 |
0.04064 |
79 |
67 |
12 |
0 |
1798 |
I consider this as coming into work. |
1.1519 |
0.04797 |
79 |
69 |
8 |
2 |
1799 |
State Farm is there? Yes, we mean it. |
1.1519 |
0.04445 |
79 |
68 |
10 |
1 |
1800 |
It's the only way I could make this trip tax-deductible. |
1.1519 |
0.05124 |
79 |
70 |
6 |
3 |
1801 |
My options are underwater |
1.1519 |
0.04064 |
79 |
67 |
12 |
0 |
1802 |
So glad I caught up to you, we've been trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty |
1.1519 |
0.04797 |
79 |
69 |
8 |
2 |
1803 |
It’s mandatory work-life balance week. |
1.1519 |
0.05124 |
79 |
70 |
6 |
3 |
1804 |
I was told that we’d be working in a pool system… |
1.1519 |
0.05124 |
79 |
70 |
6 |
3 |
1805 |
My elementary school teacher told me to never get in over my head. |
1.1518 |
0.03849 |
112 |
97 |
13 |
2 |
1806 |
i’m looking forward to casual Friday |
1.1518 |
0.03634 |
112 |
96 |
15 |
1 |
1807 |
Sorry - I thought this was the typing pool. |
1.1515 |
0.04622 |
99 |
88 |
7 |
4 |
1808 |
I was told this is where everyone does their business |
1.1515 |
0.04152 |
99 |
86 |
11 |
2 |
1809 |
My boss told me that I need more balance in my life. |
1.1515 |
0.03896 |
99 |
85 |
13 |
1 |
1810 |
But can ChatGPT do THIS? |
1.1515 |
0.04152 |
99 |
86 |
11 |
2 |
1811 |
AquaRemote. It's a thing. |
1.1515 |
0.03622 |
99 |
84 |
15 |
0 |
1812 |
I call it "sworking". |
1.1512 |
0.03885 |
86 |
73 |
13 |
0 |
1813 |
So when did you first notice that your rubber ducky was missing. |
1.1512 |
0.04223 |
86 |
74 |
11 |
1 |
1814 |
Sir, it’s illegal to stop and chat in an adult swim lane. |
1.1512 |
0.04535 |
86 |
75 |
9 |
2 |
1815 |
You get to use the deep end if you approve the waiver. |
1.1512 |
0.04535 |
86 |
75 |
9 |
2 |
1816 |
So, before you felt the kick in the face, you heard some shout, "Marco?" |
1.1512 |
0.04535 |
86 |
75 |
9 |
2 |
1817 |
I come here to work and pee. |
1.1512 |
0.04827 |
86 |
76 |
7 |
3 |
1818 |
Wait - this isn't the temp pool? |
1.1512 |
0.04223 |
86 |
74 |
11 |
1 |
1819 |
It’s a lap pool, right? |
1.1512 |
0.04535 |
86 |
75 |
9 |
2 |
1820 |
I like doing laps on my laptop. |
1.1512 |
0.04535 |
86 |
75 |
9 |
2 |
1821 |
Remote work is great, but the dress code is killing me. |
1.1512 |
0.03885 |
86 |
73 |
13 |
0 |
1822 |
I'm more productive here, no pee breaks |
1.1512 |
0.04535 |
86 |
75 |
9 |
2 |
1823 |
What do you mean, "wrong suit"? |
1.1512 |
0.04535 |
86 |
75 |
9 |
2 |
1824 |
This stroke poses no challenges for swimmers in terms of flotation. I would never recommend it, except, possibly, as a device to wedge underneath a short table leg to keep the table from drowning.
David English
Acton, Mass. |
1.1512 |
0.04827 |
86 |
76 |
7 |
3 |
1825 |
I just typed “pool.” AI chooses public or private. |
1.1512 |
0.04827 |
86 |
76 |
7 |
3 |
1826 |
And now to change my Zoom
background to “office.” |
1.1512 |
0.05103 |
86 |
77 |
5 |
4 |
1827 |
My whole world opened up when I figured out how to change the background on Zoom |
1.1512 |
0.05103 |
86 |
77 |
5 |
4 |
1828 |
AI said Marco |
1.1509 |
0.04404 |
106 |
94 |
8 |
4 |
1829 |
Man, the candidate pool sure is shallow these days |
1.1509 |
0.04195 |
106 |
93 |
10 |
3 |
1830 |
And on a scale of one to ten, sir, how much would you say you are enjoying yourself? |
1.1507 |
0.04645 |
73 |
63 |
9 |
1 |
1831 |
Should I accept cookies? |
1.1507 |
0.05038 |
73 |
64 |
7 |
2 |
1832 |
Isn't it adult swim time?" |
1.1507 |
0.05038 |
73 |
64 |
7 |
2 |
1833 |
Every Super Bowl, I enter my office’s pool. |
1.1505 |
0.04310 |
93 |
81 |
10 |
2 |
1834 |
How to describe your portfolio..."under water" comes to mind... |
1.1505 |
0.04310 |
93 |
81 |
10 |
2 |
1835 |
Multi-Tasking. It's all the rage. |
1.1505 |
0.04310 |
93 |
81 |
10 |
2 |
1836 |
It's also a flotation device. |
1.1505 |
0.04030 |
93 |
80 |
12 |
1 |
1837 |
We should sell those positions as they are under water. |
1.1505 |
0.04310 |
93 |
81 |
10 |
2 |
1838 |
Cool eh! |
1.1505 |
0.03728 |
93 |
79 |
14 |
0 |
1839 |
Ok,now this class is deductable. |
1.1505 |
0.04310 |
93 |
81 |
10 |
2 |
1840 |
I have you wading at 10:00. |
1.1505 |
0.04310 |
93 |
81 |
10 |
2 |
1841 |
``It saves me a trip to the bathroom. Just messing with you, pal.'' |
1.1505 |
0.04573 |
93 |
82 |
8 |
3 |
1842 |
Do you mind? I'm trying to work here. |
1.1505 |
0.04573 |
93 |
82 |
8 |
3 |
1843 |
Okay, I'm soooo sorry.
Doing laps.
Doing laptop.
How was I to know? |
1.1500 |
0.05063 |
80 |
71 |
6 |
3 |
1844 |
If you get a snorkel and sign a DNR I can save you 17%. |
1.1500 |
0.04394 |
80 |
69 |
10 |
1 |
1845 |
Why not? I figured, most of my investments are under water, anyway. |
1.1500 |
0.04578 |
100 |
89 |
7 |
4 |
1846 |
The best part is the office thinks I am working from home. |
1.1500 |
0.04394 |
80 |
69 |
10 |
1 |
1847 |
When I told you to liquidate your assets this isn't what I had in mind. |
1.1500 |
0.05063 |
80 |
71 |
6 |
3 |
1848 |
We can play Marco Polo after we file. |
1.1500 |
0.04740 |
80 |
70 |
8 |
2 |
1849 |
Looks like you're not completely underwater yet. |
1.1500 |
0.04740 |
80 |
70 |
8 |
2 |
1850 |
I tried work-life balance, but find work-life integration more refreshing. |
1.1500 |
0.04578 |
100 |
89 |
7 |
4 |
1851 |
Another hundred laps and you'll qualify for a dollar discount off your life insurance premium. |
1.1500 |
0.04394 |
80 |
69 |
10 |
1 |
1852 |
I love not having to get up and walk to the bathroom. |
1.1500 |
0.04352 |
100 |
88 |
9 |
3 |
1853 |
Water aerobics and work! |
1.1500 |
0.04113 |
100 |
87 |
11 |
2 |
1854 |
We're here for you 24/7, with or without sunscreen. |
1.1500 |
0.04394 |
80 |
69 |
10 |
1 |
1855 |
I'm hoping to make a big splash at work. |
1.1500 |
0.04352 |
100 |
88 |
9 |
3 |
1856 |
My job encourages remote aquatics |
1.1500 |
0.04352 |
100 |
88 |
9 |
3 |
1857 |
Just trying to keep my head above the water here. |
1.1500 |
0.04352 |
100 |
88 |
9 |
3 |
1858 |
I’ve always lived life in the fast lane |
1.1495 |
0.04365 |
107 |
95 |
8 |
4 |
1859 |
I'm only taking half of my vacation day. |
1.1495 |
0.03940 |
107 |
93 |
12 |
2 |
1860 |
And where were you January 6th? |
1.1495 |
0.04158 |
107 |
94 |
10 |
3 |
1861 |
My cardiologist wants me in the pool an hour each day. |
1.1494 |
0.04178 |
87 |
75 |
11 |
1 |
1862 |
Well, to be honest, I really had to pee! |
1.1494 |
0.05047 |
87 |
78 |
5 |
4 |
1863 |
What’s it worth to you for me to turn off the video? |
1.1494 |
0.04775 |
87 |
77 |
7 |
3 |
1864 |
Now let's move on to some questions about the water temperature. |
1.1494 |
0.03844 |
87 |
74 |
13 |
0 |
1865 |
My company allows me to work from home...only in business formal attire though. |
1.1494 |
0.04486 |
87 |
76 |
9 |
2 |
1866 |
Why no jacket? My business! |
1.1494 |
0.04486 |
87 |
76 |
9 |
2 |
1867 |
My laptop tracks lapses in your lap performance |
1.1494 |
0.04486 |
87 |
76 |
9 |
2 |
1868 |
It's a vacation variant of the covid work-from-home scheme |
1.1494 |
0.04178 |
87 |
75 |
11 |
1 |
1869 |
Frankly, I’m a bit nostalgic for the water cooler. |
1.1494 |
0.04178 |
87 |
75 |
11 |
1 |
1870 |
I was told my company had no choice but to go into liquidation |
1.1494 |
0.04486 |
87 |
76 |
9 |
2 |
1871 |
I was ordered to go to the typing pool. |
1.1494 |
0.04178 |
87 |
75 |
11 |
1 |
1872 |
If you must know,
I’m here to surf the net. |
1.1494 |
0.04178 |
87 |
75 |
11 |
1 |
1873 |
I can't wait for casual Friday |
1.1494 |
0.04775 |
87 |
77 |
7 |
3 |
1874 |
The shirt and tie are just for the zoom meeting. I am working from home today |
1.1494 |
0.04486 |
87 |
76 |
9 |
2 |
1875 |
So, you want me to float you a loan. |
1.1494 |
0.04775 |
87 |
77 |
7 |
3 |
1876 |
I'm doing research on "prune skin". |
1.1494 |
0.04775 |
87 |
77 |
7 |
3 |
1877 |
Just let me finish up this swimlane. |
1.1494 |
0.04486 |
87 |
76 |
9 |
2 |
1878 |
Since working from the pool, my productivity has increased 23%. I no longer need to take breaks to pee. |
1.1494 |
0.04178 |
87 |
75 |
11 |
1 |
1879 |
They let us work on vacation now |
1.1494 |
0.04486 |
87 |
76 |
9 |
2 |
1880 |
Well, you said you wanted to take this offline, so let's dive right in. |
1.1494 |
0.04775 |
87 |
77 |
7 |
3 |
1881 |
Actually, a lot of CEOs got their start in the typing pool. |
1.1489 |
0.04267 |
94 |
82 |
10 |
2 |
1882 |
So, swimming beats work? |
1.1489 |
0.03692 |
94 |
80 |
14 |
0 |
1883 |
And then she was like, "I bet you can't spend one day away from the office!", and I was like "You're on, bitch!" |
1.1489 |
0.04527 |
94 |
83 |
8 |
3 |
1884 |
They allow us to work remotely but they remain steadfast on business professional attire. |
1.1489 |
0.03692 |
94 |
80 |
14 |
0 |
1885 |
Now I don't need restroom breaks. |
1.1489 |
0.04267 |
94 |
82 |
10 |
2 |
1886 |
White Rabbit? Don't know it. |
1.1489 |
0.04267 |
94 |
82 |
10 |
2 |
1887 |
They said "come to the pool to do laps". I thought they said "Come to the pool with your lap". |
1.1489 |
0.03990 |
94 |
81 |
12 |
1 |
1888 |
I really prefer we meet at my office to go over your taxes. |
1.1489 |
0.04527 |
94 |
83 |
8 |
3 |
1889 |
As mentioned earlier, we're willing to work around your schedule. |
1.1489 |
0.03692 |
94 |
80 |
14 |
0 |
1890 |
Apparently, I won the office pool. |
1.1489 |
0.03990 |
94 |
81 |
12 |
1 |
1891 |
My goal is to make wet working the new quiet quitting. |
1.1489 |
0.04773 |
94 |
84 |
6 |
4 |
1892 |
For some reason I can't refresh |
1.1489 |
0.03990 |
94 |
81 |
12 |
1 |
1893 |
Yea man, my wife said swimming would help with my work stress. |
1.1489 |
0.04267 |
94 |
82 |
10 |
2 |
1894 |
If you all don’t mind, I’m going to keep my camera off for this zoom meeting. |
1.1489 |
0.04267 |
94 |
82 |
10 |
2 |
1895 |
I’m notorious at the company for my witty background photos. |
1.1489 |
0.03990 |
94 |
81 |
12 |
1 |
1896 |
They told me to dive deep into it |
1.1489 |
0.04267 |
94 |
82 |
10 |
2 |
1897 |
On a tight schedule. |
1.1486 |
0.04974 |
74 |
65 |
7 |
2 |
1898 |
All they told me was that, I had to wear a suit to go in the pool. |
1.1486 |
0.05333 |
74 |
66 |
5 |
3 |
1899 |
Swim suits required. Its right here on their website! |
1.1486 |
0.04974 |
74 |
65 |
7 |
2 |
1900 |
It’s called mindfulness, Lewis |
1.1485 |
0.04535 |
101 |
90 |
7 |
4 |
1901 |
This pool has better WiFi than my office. |
1.1485 |
0.04748 |
101 |
91 |
5 |
5 |
1902 |
And did you have any life events or major purchases this year? |
1.1485 |
0.03824 |
101 |
87 |
13 |
1 |
1903 |
What do you mean it wasn't THAT type of pool application? |
1.1485 |
0.04075 |
101 |
88 |
11 |
2 |
1904 |
It’s not so bad. The last place I worked was completely under water. |
1.1485 |
0.04311 |
101 |
89 |
9 |
3 |
1905 |
Personally, I prefer the keystroke. |
1.1485 |
0.04075 |
101 |
88 |
11 |
2 |
1906 |
My office eliminated casual Fridays. |
1.1485 |
0.04075 |
101 |
88 |
11 |
2 |
1907 |
Today's my flex day. |
1.1485 |
0.04075 |
101 |
88 |
11 |
2 |
1908 |
I lost my trunks |
1.1485 |
0.03824 |
101 |
87 |
13 |
1 |
1909 |
This is not quite what I expected when I applied to work in the Secretarial Pool! |
1.1485 |
0.04535 |
101 |
90 |
7 |
4 |
1910 |
It’s a camera off day |
1.1485 |
0.04311 |
101 |
89 |
9 |
3 |
1911 |
It’s my work bathing suit |
1.1485 |
0.03824 |
101 |
87 |
13 |
1 |
1912 |
And, I don’t need a key to the executive washroom. |
1.1481 |
0.04343 |
81 |
70 |
10 |
1 |
1913 |
Since you went offline we stalk you real time now. |
1.1481 |
0.04685 |
81 |
71 |
8 |
2 |
1914 |
They said "free wi-fi on all hotel premises". |
1.1481 |
0.04685 |
81 |
71 |
8 |
2 |
1915 |
I find I do my best work when I really immerse myself. |
1.1481 |
0.04685 |
81 |
71 |
8 |
2 |
1916 |
Just trying to cool off before I jump into the grand jury hot seat. |
1.1481 |
0.05003 |
81 |
72 |
6 |
3 |
1917 |
I call this work privilage |
1.1481 |
0.04343 |
81 |
70 |
10 |
1 |
1918 |
I'm drowning in paperwork today. |
1.1481 |
0.04343 |
81 |
70 |
10 |
1 |
1919 |
I'd like to float you a loan, but clearly you have buoyancy issues |
1.1481 |
0.05003 |
81 |
72 |
6 |
3 |
1920 |
Corporate says my reports are too dry. |
1.1481 |
0.04343 |
81 |
70 |
10 |
1 |
1921 |
Au contraire. This would be a perfect time to review your Liquid Assets portfolio. |
1.1481 |
0.04343 |
81 |
70 |
10 |
1 |
1922 |
Wanna take a deeper dive into last week’s sales figures? |
1.1481 |
0.05003 |
81 |
72 |
6 |
3 |
1923 |
As a licenced CPA, I am advising you that deducting the cost of your Speedos as a medical expense will not be allowed . Even, if they do hold your boys in. |
1.1481 |
0.04685 |
81 |
71 |
8 |
2 |
1924 |
at least I'm not in over my head..... |
1.1481 |
0.04685 |
81 |
71 |
8 |
2 |
1925 |
I'm not working from home. I'm in the secretarial pool. |
1.1481 |
0.04343 |
81 |
70 |
10 |
1 |
1926 |
Silence! It’s almost my time to introduce myself on the call! |
1.1481 |
0.03678 |
108 |
93 |
14 |
1 |
1927 |
I’m doing a piece for the New Yorker
Can you verify your wife’s maiden name? |
1.1481 |
0.04685 |
81 |
71 |
8 |
2 |
1928 |
We have a dress code, even for remote work. |
1.1481 |
0.04343 |
81 |
70 |
10 |
1 |
1929 |
Secretarial pool is next lane. This is for management types who can barely tread water. |
1.1481 |
0.05303 |
81 |
73 |
4 |
4 |
1930 |
The Breaststroke was cancelled. This is the Keystroke. |
1.1481 |
0.04685 |
81 |
71 |
8 |
2 |
1931 |
I'm trying to better my work-life balance |
1.1481 |
0.05003 |
81 |
72 |
6 |
3 |
1932 |
Ok, I met you half way |
1.1481 |
0.04343 |
81 |
70 |
10 |
1 |
1933 |
According to my calculations, I’m a nerd. |
1.1477 |
0.04438 |
88 |
77 |
9 |
2 |
1934 |
It would have worked if I had remembered to change my Zoom background |
1.1477 |
0.04438 |
88 |
77 |
9 |
2 |
1935 |
We were told that all pool writers could no longer work remotely. |
1.1477 |
0.04723 |
88 |
78 |
7 |
3 |
1936 |
Now I can deduct this as a business expense.. |
1.1477 |
0.04133 |
88 |
76 |
11 |
1 |
1937 |
So she fed you lunch and then let you swim in less than an hour?! |
1.1477 |
0.04133 |
88 |
76 |
11 |
1 |
1938 |
Lap time. |
1.1477 |
0.04438 |
88 |
77 |
9 |
2 |
1939 |
With no restroom breaks I can accomplish so much more! |
1.1477 |
0.04438 |
88 |
77 |
9 |
2 |
1940 |
It's the ultimate Zoom background. |
1.1477 |
0.03804 |
88 |
75 |
13 |
0 |
1941 |
Back in school, I was champion of the keystroke. |
1.1477 |
0.04992 |
88 |
79 |
5 |
4 |
1942 |
It's possible that work-from-home has made it hard to separate work from non-work time. |
1.1477 |
0.04723 |
88 |
78 |
7 |
3 |
1943 |
I do laptops not laps |
1.1477 |
0.04133 |
88 |
76 |
11 |
1 |
1944 |
For awhile I was in over my ahead, but.... |
1.1477 |
0.04133 |
88 |
76 |
11 |
1 |
1945 |
Business casual doesn't fly with my boss. |
1.1477 |
0.04133 |
88 |
76 |
11 |
1 |
1946 |
Testing the waters before I jump in to retirement. |
1.1477 |
0.04723 |
88 |
78 |
7 |
3 |
1947 |
It's really all about work-life balance. |
1.1477 |
0.04133 |
88 |
76 |
11 |
1 |
1948 |
Do you have any other pooled assets? |
1.1477 |
0.04438 |
88 |
77 |
9 |
2 |
1949 |
I 'm just not ready for the deep end. |
1.1477 |
0.04133 |
88 |
76 |
11 |
1 |
1950 |
It’s the only place I get poolside service. |
1.1477 |
0.04438 |
88 |
77 |
9 |
2 |
1951 |
My boss said jump feet first into the pool of potential clients. |
1.1477 |
0.04438 |
88 |
77 |
9 |
2 |
1952 |
What do you mean I'm in too deep? |
1.1477 |
0.04723 |
88 |
78 |
7 |
3 |
1953 |
Yeah, I like a deep dive too. I'm reading the Wikipedia page for 'Pool' right now. |
1.1477 |
0.04723 |
88 |
78 |
7 |
3 |
1954 |
I see you left something in your cart. |
1.1477 |
0.04992 |
88 |
79 |
5 |
4 |
1955 |
Backstroke? No, this is the key-stroke. |
1.1477 |
0.04438 |
88 |
77 |
9 |
2 |
1956 |
No I’m not drowning in work, I’m treading in multitasking |
1.1475 |
0.04143 |
122 |
109 |
8 |
5 |
1957 |
It’s tax deductible, and there’s no sunburn. |
1.1474 |
0.04225 |
95 |
83 |
10 |
2 |
1958 |
Liquidity is really important in my sector. |
1.1474 |
0.04482 |
95 |
84 |
8 |
3 |
1959 |
This way I balance both. |
1.1474 |
0.03656 |
95 |
81 |
14 |
0 |
1960 |
Materials research: it's an experimental wetsuit. |
1.1474 |
0.04482 |
95 |
84 |
8 |
3 |
1961 |
Sorry, I can’t talk right now. I’m just trying to stay above water at work. |
1.1474 |
0.04225 |
95 |
83 |
10 |
2 |
1962 |
I heard it could help with back pain. |
1.1474 |
0.04225 |
95 |
83 |
10 |
2 |
1963 |
I don't even have to take vacation time. |
1.1474 |
0.04725 |
95 |
85 |
6 |
4 |
1964 |
I've been swimming in emails all week. |
1.1474 |
0.03656 |
95 |
81 |
14 |
0 |
1965 |
« My home office got flooded » |
1.1474 |
0.03951 |
95 |
82 |
12 |
1 |
1966 |
the hotspot was getting to me" |
1.1474 |
0.04225 |
95 |
83 |
10 |
2 |
1967 |
You only needed the shirt and tie |
1.1474 |
0.03951 |
95 |
82 |
12 |
1 |
1968 |
So anyway, after the divorce, I’ve really changed my priorities. Working on myself now. |
1.1474 |
0.04482 |
95 |
84 |
8 |
3 |
1969 |
I’m working on my splash page. |
1.1471 |
0.04493 |
102 |
91 |
7 |
4 |
1970 |
I'm here for the Zoom background." |
1.1471 |
0.04493 |
102 |
91 |
7 |
4 |
1971 |
I could sit in a coffee shop all day but this is healthier. |
1.1471 |
0.04038 |
102 |
89 |
11 |
2 |
1972 |
I’m taking half of a vacation day. |
1.1471 |
0.03790 |
102 |
88 |
13 |
1 |
1973 |
I’m quiet vacationing. |
1.1471 |
0.04327 |
68 |
58 |
10 |
0 |
1974 |
Haven't you heard of a workcation? |
1.1471 |
0.03524 |
102 |
87 |
15 |
0 |
1975 |
I just got sucked into this meeting... |
1.1471 |
0.03790 |
102 |
88 |
13 |
1 |
1976 |
I can offer you big discounts on your drowning rates insurance. |
1.1471 |
0.04038 |
102 |
89 |
11 |
2 |
1977 |
No, I am having fun. You're the one not having fun. |
1.1471 |
0.04038 |
102 |
89 |
11 |
2 |
1978 |
I couldn't work out how to put a holiday background on Zoom |
1.1471 |
0.04038 |
102 |
89 |
11 |
2 |
1979 |
Somebody’s gotta pay for this vacation, bub. |
1.1471 |
0.04271 |
102 |
90 |
9 |
3 |
1980 |
They've relaxed their policy about in-office work but they won't budge on the dress code. |
1.1471 |
0.04271 |
102 |
90 |
9 |
3 |
1981 |
For me, it’s really all about business in the front and party in the back |
1.1468 |
0.03872 |
109 |
95 |
12 |
2 |
1982 |
At the end of my time, I don't want to look back and regret having not worked more. |
1.1467 |
0.04911 |
75 |
66 |
7 |
2 |
1983 |
I blur the background and usually get away with it |
1.1467 |
0.04911 |
75 |
66 |
7 |
2 |
1984 |
Speaking of swimming, but your accounts are under water. |
1.1467 |
0.04911 |
75 |
66 |
7 |
2 |
1985 |
Don’t look at me like that. It is, after all, called a swimsuit. |
1.1467 |
0.04530 |
75 |
65 |
9 |
1 |
1986 |
It's not what you think! I'm writing this vacation off as a business expense. |
1.1467 |
0.04530 |
75 |
65 |
9 |
1 |
1987 |
My treadmill desk was hard on my knees. |
1.1463 |
0.03927 |
82 |
70 |
12 |
0 |
1988 |
I'm from your alumni society. Is this a good time? |
1.1463 |
0.04631 |
82 |
72 |
8 |
2 |
1989 |
I'm the CEO and lifeguard of this resort! |
1.1463 |
0.04293 |
82 |
71 |
10 |
1 |
1990 |
My therapist told me to try to combine work and pleasure. |
1.1463 |
0.04631 |
82 |
72 |
8 |
2 |
1991 |
My stand-up desk is in drydock. |
1.1463 |
0.04293 |
82 |
71 |
10 |
1 |
1992 |
Where's your suit? |
1.1463 |
0.04631 |
82 |
72 |
8 |
2 |
1993 |
Once you use a stand-up desk, it's it's really tough to do anything else. |
1.1463 |
0.03927 |
82 |
70 |
12 |
0 |
1994 |
I figured I’d start in the secretarial pool and work my way up. |
1.1463 |
0.04293 |
82 |
71 |
10 |
1 |
1995 |
I'm trying to get out of the office more these days, show my wife I can still be "fun". |
1.1463 |
0.04631 |
82 |
72 |
8 |
2 |
1996 |
Yes, working vacation, all right! |
1.1463 |
0.03927 |
82 |
70 |
12 |
0 |
1997 |
Mandatory zoom call. Don't worry, I've muted myself. |
1.1463 |
0.04631 |
82 |
72 |
8 |
2 |
1998 |
Just fishing for a good story. |
1.1463 |
0.04631 |
82 |
72 |
8 |
2 |
1999 |
I promised my boss it would be a working vacation. |
1.1463 |
0.04631 |
82 |
72 |
8 |
2 |
2000 |
Being able to Work From Pool helps a lot! |
1.1463 |
0.04293 |
82 |
71 |
10 |
1 |
2001 |
Please, the password, anyone |
1.1463 |
0.04631 |
82 |
72 |
8 |
2 |
2002 |
I used to not wear any pants on calls. HR is fine with swimwear. |
1.1463 |
0.04293 |
82 |
71 |
10 |
1 |
2003 |
It's called Quiet Vacationing, all the GenXrs are doing it. |
1.1463 |
0.04293 |
82 |
71 |
10 |
1 |
2004 |
I‘m getting in deep waters with my presentation |
1.1463 |
0.04631 |
82 |
72 |
8 |
2 |
2005 |
....and how do you feel about your percs? |
1.1461 |
0.04090 |
89 |
77 |
11 |
1 |
2006 |
I may have misunderstood when they said we were underwater financially." |
1.1461 |
0.04391 |
89 |
78 |
9 |
2 |
2007 |
Do you know the password for the pool's wi-fi? |
1.1461 |
0.04090 |
89 |
77 |
11 |
1 |
2008 |
I wear my trunks on casual Friday. |
1.1461 |
0.04090 |
89 |
77 |
11 |
1 |
2009 |
Do you have flood insurance? |
1.1461 |
0.04391 |
89 |
78 |
9 |
2 |
2010 |
Our remote work policy conflicts somewhat with our vacation policy |
1.1461 |
0.04673 |
89 |
79 |
7 |
3 |
2011 |
And, we can add a rider to cover drowning. |
1.1461 |
0.04391 |
89 |
78 |
9 |
2 |
2012 |
Deadline. Bonus. Wife's happy...Tell me you wouldn't do the same. |
1.1461 |
0.03765 |
89 |
76 |
13 |
0 |
2013 |
Walking desks hurt my knees. |
1.1461 |
0.03765 |
89 |
76 |
13 |
0 |
2014 |
What memo? |
1.1461 |
0.04090 |
89 |
77 |
11 |
1 |
2015 |
They say work life balance is the key to success. |
1.1461 |
0.04391 |
89 |
78 |
9 |
2 |
2016 |
I get unlimited PTO. |
1.1461 |
0.04391 |
89 |
78 |
9 |
2 |
2017 |
I'm afraid that idea is all wet |
1.1461 |
0.04391 |
89 |
78 |
9 |
2 |
2018 |
Yeah, I need to tread carefully. |
1.1461 |
0.04391 |
89 |
78 |
9 |
2 |
2019 |
You’ve heard of the rat race? This is leg 2 of the rat triathlon. |
1.1461 |
0.04391 |
89 |
78 |
9 |
2 |
2020 |
Why yes, I find this far superior to a stand up desk. |
1.1461 |
0.04673 |
89 |
79 |
7 |
3 |
2021 |
I’m not sure about the new company sponsored swim lessons to stop us from drowning in work. |
1.1461 |
0.04391 |
89 |
78 |
9 |
2 |
2022 |
I’m leading a high-level deep dive |
1.1461 |
0.04090 |
89 |
77 |
11 |
1 |
2023 |
On a scale of 1 to 5 where 1 is totally agree and 5 is totally ... |
1.1458 |
0.04183 |
96 |
84 |
10 |
2 |
2024 |
I’m just trying to stay afloat in this market. |
1.1458 |
0.03912 |
96 |
83 |
12 |
1 |
2025 |
It's just part of our 'Leaving your Comfort Zone' training. |
1.1458 |
0.04437 |
96 |
85 |
8 |
3 |
2026 |
I was hired to work in the secretary pool, but it looks like I’m the first one here. |
1.1458 |
0.03621 |
96 |
82 |
14 |
0 |
2027 |
I'm the pool reporter here. Stay in your lane, Bub. |
1.1458 |
0.04183 |
96 |
84 |
10 |
2 |
2028 |
Is your dying aunt in the shallow end or the sauna? Either way, you're fired. |
1.1458 |
0.04183 |
96 |
84 |
10 |
2 |
2029 |
This was the closest bathroom. |
1.1458 |
0.04183 |
96 |
84 |
10 |
2 |
2030 |
I just pissed in da pool…can everyone see my screen? |
1.1458 |
0.04183 |
96 |
84 |
10 |
2 |
2031 |
Don't worry,I waited 30 minutes after eating lunch. |
1.1456 |
0.04232 |
103 |
91 |
9 |
3 |
2032 |
We found Hunter’s laptop with Hillary’s emails hidden in the documents at Mar-A-Lago. Looks like a vast broken wing conspiracy. |
1.1456 |
0.04001 |
103 |
90 |
11 |
2 |
2033 |
I can't stop working; I'm barely staying afloat as it is. |
1.1456 |
0.03755 |
103 |
89 |
13 |
1 |
2034 |
The company is trying out work from anywhere |
1.1456 |
0.04232 |
103 |
91 |
9 |
3 |
2035 |
"All in all, I don't know if I'm working in my free time or relaxing at work right now." |
1.1455 |
0.04252 |
110 |
98 |
8 |
4 |
2036 |
I’m here to talk about your car’s extended warranty. |
1.1455 |
0.04443 |
110 |
99 |
6 |
5 |
2037 |
Because I’m really not completely under water yet. |
1.1449 |
0.05569 |
69 |
62 |
4 |
3 |
2038 |
Ethnographer: "So tell me, what does the water feel like to you?" |
1.1449 |
0.05172 |
69 |
61 |
6 |
2 |
2039 |
The Wi-Fi’s better here. |
1.1447 |
0.04063 |
76 |
65 |
11 |
0 |
2040 |
You don't expect me to Zoom my boss in a Speedo, do you? |
1.1447 |
0.05199 |
76 |
68 |
5 |
3 |
2041 |
I'm sorry but the secretarial pool was full. |
1.1447 |
0.04474 |
76 |
66 |
9 |
1 |
2042 |
My boss said I need to pool my resources. |
1.1446 |
0.04245 |
83 |
72 |
10 |
1 |
2043 |
Technically, I still work from home. |
1.1446 |
0.04578 |
83 |
73 |
8 |
2 |
2044 |
My next book is about fish. |
1.1446 |
0.04245 |
83 |
72 |
10 |
1 |
2045 |
Casual Friday I can handle. But, Swimming Pool Saturday.. just sayin'. |
1.1446 |
0.04889 |
83 |
74 |
6 |
3 |
2046 |
It’s a benefit of our “Work From Pool” policy |
1.1446 |
0.04245 |
83 |
72 |
10 |
1 |
2047 |
JUST CATCHING UP |
1.1446 |
0.04578 |
83 |
73 |
8 |
2 |
2048 |
Google maps said, "you've arrived at your office destination." |
1.1446 |
0.04578 |
83 |
73 |
8 |
2 |
2049 |
Why do you think they call it a lap-top? |
1.1446 |
0.04578 |
83 |
73 |
8 |
2 |
2050 |
Remote work has been great, but we are still only able to dress casually on Fridays. |
1.1446 |
0.04889 |
83 |
74 |
6 |
3 |
2051 |
It took a while for me to find my work-life balance. |
1.1446 |
0.04578 |
83 |
73 |
8 |
2 |
2052 |
Why would I only work from home when there are so many other options? |
1.1446 |
0.04245 |
83 |
72 |
10 |
1 |
2053 |
My doctor thought aquatics might help me relax. |
1.1446 |
0.04245 |
83 |
72 |
10 |
1 |
2054 |
Bob, I’m telling you I’ve run the numbers every which way til Sunday.
Unfortunately, both you and the company are under water! |
1.1446 |
0.04245 |
83 |
72 |
10 |
1 |
2055 |
Unlike me, Mr. Smith, our records place you in really deep water. |
1.1446 |
0.04889 |
83 |
74 |
6 |
3 |
2056 |
You laugh, but I'll be the one who still knows how to be productive when sea levels rise. |
1.1446 |
0.04245 |
83 |
72 |
10 |
1 |
2057 |
Can you help me with this? I’m trying to float an idea here. |
1.1446 |
0.04245 |
83 |
72 |
10 |
1 |
2058 |
I’m pooling ideas today. |
1.1446 |
0.04245 |
83 |
72 |
10 |
1 |
2059 |
My blog is about summer recreational opportunities and it's hard for my followers to take me seriously if I am always sitting in front of bookshelves. |
1.1446 |
0.04578 |
83 |
73 |
8 |
2 |
2060 |
My office insists on work-life balance. |
1.1446 |
0.04578 |
83 |
73 |
8 |
2 |
2061 |
You got a charger? |
1.1446 |
0.04889 |
83 |
74 |
6 |
3 |
2062 |
They cut remote work in half. |
1.1446 |
0.03884 |
83 |
71 |
12 |
0 |
2063 |
Lifeguarding is my side hustle. |
1.1446 |
0.04245 |
83 |
72 |
10 |
1 |
2064 |
I know the memo said “Casual Friday,” but I have to draw the line somewhere. |
1.1446 |
0.04578 |
83 |
73 |
8 |
2 |
2065 |
I'm only here for one day. |
1.1444 |
0.04048 |
90 |
78 |
11 |
1 |
2066 |
My Doc said "You've gotta get out of your chair!" |
1.1444 |
0.03726 |
90 |
77 |
13 |
0 |
2067 |
I am busy, but I wouldn't exactly say that I'm "swamped". |
1.1444 |
0.04048 |
90 |
78 |
11 |
1 |
2068 |
Your pronouns? |
1.1444 |
0.04345 |
90 |
79 |
9 |
2 |
2069 |
Don't worry my camera is turned off |
1.1444 |
0.04345 |
90 |
79 |
9 |
2 |
2070 |
What? It's a laps-top! |
1.1444 |
0.04345 |
90 |
79 |
9 |
2 |
2071 |
I’m here for the diving board meeting. |
1.1444 |
0.04048 |
90 |
78 |
11 |
1 |
2072 |
They don’t know that i’m wearing pants |
1.1444 |
0.04345 |
90 |
79 |
9 |
2 |
2073 |
FB Friends, This is my office today! |
1.1444 |
0.04048 |
90 |
78 |
11 |
1 |
2074 |
Looks like we’re still waiting on Mike to join the call, but let’s go ahead and jump in. |
1.1444 |
0.03726 |
90 |
77 |
13 |
0 |
2075 |
Dude. Stay in your lane! |
1.1444 |
0.03726 |
90 |
77 |
13 |
0 |
2076 |
I'm trying to relax more. |
1.1443 |
0.03587 |
97 |
83 |
14 |
0 |
2077 |
Do yourself a favor and never consider a working vacation. |
1.1443 |
0.03875 |
97 |
84 |
12 |
1 |
2078 |
I'm thinking about throwing in the towel |
1.1443 |
0.04142 |
97 |
85 |
10 |
2 |
2079 |
Business up top, party downstairs. |
1.1443 |
0.04394 |
97 |
86 |
8 |
3 |
2080 |
My suit? Filing it right now. |
1.1443 |
0.04142 |
97 |
85 |
10 |
2 |
2081 |
We agreed to work from pool one day a week |
1.1443 |
0.04142 |
97 |
85 |
10 |
2 |
2082 |
You have to excuse me. I have a "Teams" meeting in a couple of minutes. |
1.1443 |
0.04142 |
97 |
85 |
10 |
2 |
2083 |
Thank you for meeting with me on such short notice. I recognize that your time is valuable. |
1.1443 |
0.03875 |
97 |
84 |
12 |
1 |
2084 |
You have no idea what it’s like to be her assistant! |
1.1443 |
0.04394 |
97 |
86 |
8 |
3 |
2085 |
You should have just completed the exit interview at the office then |
1.1443 |
0.03587 |
97 |
83 |
14 |
0 |
2086 |
Oh, I'm new to the secretarial pool. |
1.1442 |
0.04193 |
104 |
92 |
9 |
3 |
2087 |
I finally took the plunge and started by own business. |
1.1442 |
0.04193 |
104 |
92 |
9 |
3 |
2088 |
Let’s take a lap and circle back. |
1.1442 |
0.04193 |
104 |
92 |
9 |
3 |
2089 |
You said you couldn’t answer the survey because you were in the pool. Well, now I’m in the pool. |
1.1441 |
0.04016 |
111 |
98 |
10 |
3 |
2090 |
We're trying to pool our reources. |
1.1429 |
0.04790 |
77 |
68 |
7 |
2 |
2091 |
I was told remote work is supposed to be more conducive to relaxation. |
1.1429 |
0.04833 |
84 |
75 |
6 |
3 |
2092 |
Not what I meant by 'deep dive', guys |
1.1429 |
0.03929 |
105 |
92 |
11 |
2 |
2093 |
Integrating laps and laptop just seemed natural! |
1.1429 |
0.04198 |
84 |
73 |
10 |
1 |
2094 |
What is your current liquidity? |
1.1429 |
0.03929 |
105 |
92 |
11 |
2 |
2095 |
I'm on call. |
1.1429 |
0.03841 |
84 |
72 |
12 |
0 |
2096 |
It's an injunction against cannonballs |
1.1429 |
0.04575 |
91 |
81 |
7 |
3 |
2097 |
Let’s see if you can get your heart pumping faster — 6 more laps. |
1.1429 |
0.04575 |
91 |
81 |
7 |
3 |
2098 |
Hi, I'm Bartleby. My boss told me to go jump in a lake ... this was closer. |
1.1429 |
0.04790 |
77 |
68 |
7 |
2 |
2099 |
It's a floating solitaire game. |
1.1429 |
0.03431 |
105 |
90 |
15 |
0 |
2100 |
Sidestroke, breaststroke, keystroke. Suit yourself. |
1.1429 |
0.05121 |
84 |
76 |
4 |
4 |
2101 |
Your free trial membership ends in ten minutes. Care to enroll? |
1.1429 |
0.04575 |
91 |
81 |
7 |
3 |
2102 |
It is Adult Swim, right?" |
1.1429 |
0.04419 |
77 |
67 |
9 |
1 |
2103 |
Please keep it down, I’m presenting to the board. |
1.1429 |
0.04527 |
84 |
74 |
8 |
2 |
2104 |
Yes indeed sir, you're looking for our fecal and urinary protection package, which is $15 a month, or $50 for the season. |
1.1429 |
0.04527 |
84 |
74 |
8 |
2 |
2105 |
Look, we're no longer underwater and we're hoping to emerge from this entirely. |
1.1429 |
0.04527 |
84 |
74 |
8 |
2 |
2106 |
Swimming was my wife's idea. She says I work too hard. |
1.1429 |
0.04300 |
91 |
80 |
9 |
2 |
2107 |
Yes it's a lap recording laptop. |
1.1429 |
0.04006 |
91 |
79 |
11 |
1 |
2108 |
No need for concern. Zoom makes it look like I'm vacationing at the Golden Gate Bridge. |
1.1429 |
0.04419 |
77 |
67 |
9 |
1 |
2109 |
It only counts as a half-day of vacation. |
1.1429 |
0.04419 |
77 |
67 |
9 |
1 |
2110 |
I want to check out if it is water tight while I can still return it. |
1.1429 |
0.04198 |
84 |
73 |
10 |
1 |
2111 |
On a scale of 1 to 10, how likely are you to recommend this pool to others? |
1.1429 |
0.04527 |
84 |
74 |
8 |
2 |
2112 |
Working Remotely |
1.1429 |
0.04006 |
91 |
79 |
11 |
1 |
2113 |
I'm from the I.R.S. and since we can't get the shirt off your back, we'll take the bathing suit off the rest. |
1.1429 |
0.04103 |
98 |
86 |
10 |
2 |
2114 |
Your mission is to find the culprit who's been peeing in the pool |
1.1429 |
0.05135 |
77 |
69 |
5 |
3 |
2115 |
Have you thought about an extended warranty on your vehicle, sir? |
1.1429 |
0.04300 |
91 |
80 |
9 |
2 |
2116 |
I thought this was a laptop lane. |
1.1429 |
0.04419 |
77 |
67 |
9 |
1 |
2117 |
I think we may be able to claim the pool as a deduction. |
1.1429 |
0.04213 |
70 |
60 |
10 |
0 |
2118 |
I'm always multitasking. |
1.1429 |
0.04300 |
91 |
80 |
9 |
2 |
2119 |
I'm naked from the knees down. |
1.1429 |
0.03689 |
91 |
78 |
13 |
0 |
2120 |
Did you see my jacket? |
1.1429 |
0.04527 |
84 |
74 |
8 |
2 |
2121 |
Just stay in your lane friend. |
1.1429 |
0.04527 |
84 |
74 |
8 |
2 |
2122 |
It's my personal casual Friday. |
1.1429 |
0.04198 |
84 |
73 |
10 |
1 |
2123 |
I like to keep my assets liquid. |
1.1429 |
0.04790 |
77 |
68 |
7 |
2 |
2124 |
I went off the deep end |
1.1429 |
0.04833 |
84 |
75 |
6 |
3 |
2125 |
It’s fine, my background’s blurred. |
1.1429 |
0.04006 |
91 |
79 |
11 |
1 |
2126 |
Boss says we need to pool the data together ! |
1.1429 |
0.04833 |
84 |
75 |
6 |
3 |
2127 |
No, I did not take a shower before entering the pool. |
1.1429 |
0.05121 |
84 |
76 |
4 |
4 |
2128 |
Actually this is the only place in the whole resort that I get 5 bars. |
1.1429 |
0.04006 |
91 |
79 |
11 |
1 |
2129 |
I'm tired of being told to stay in my lane. |
1.1429 |
0.04198 |
84 |
73 |
10 |
1 |
2130 |
And how many laps are you claiming on Schedule A? |
1.1429 |
0.04419 |
77 |
67 |
9 |
1 |
2131 |
high and dry |
1.1429 |
0.04419 |
77 |
67 |
9 |
1 |
2132 |
Your lap swim time has lapsed. |
1.1429 |
0.04575 |
91 |
81 |
7 |
3 |
2133 |
HR made me get rid of my treadmill desk. |
1.1429 |
0.04351 |
98 |
87 |
8 |
3 |
2134 |
It's my new stand up desk. Why do you ask? |
1.1429 |
0.03553 |
98 |
84 |
14 |
0 |
2135 |
It's my weekly conference call. |
1.1429 |
0.03838 |
98 |
85 |
12 |
1 |
2136 |
My boss told me I needed to be more creative with my Zoom backgrounds. |
1.1429 |
0.04370 |
105 |
94 |
7 |
4 |
2137 |
I’m more productive when I don’t have to stop for restroom breaks. |
1.1429 |
0.04351 |
98 |
87 |
8 |
3 |
2138 |
I keep telling my boss we should consider making casual Friday every day. |
1.1429 |
0.04198 |
84 |
73 |
10 |
1 |
2139 |
I call it our office pool. |
1.1429 |
0.03929 |
105 |
92 |
11 |
2 |
2140 |
This is not what I thought winning the office pool meant. |
1.1429 |
0.04014 |
77 |
66 |
11 |
0 |
2141 |
They said it was adult swim |
1.1429 |
0.04198 |
84 |
73 |
10 |
1 |
2142 |
They said they would provide me with immersive technology with my new position. Not quite what I had in mind. |
1.1429 |
0.04790 |
77 |
68 |
7 |
2 |
2143 |
I consider myself a pioneer in pushing the limits of noise cancellation and background blurring |
1.1429 |
0.04198 |
84 |
73 |
10 |
1 |
2144 |
I didn’t take any PTO for this |
1.1429 |
0.05135 |
77 |
69 |
5 |
3 |
2145 |
This is not what I was expecting when my editor said they needed a new pool reporter. |
1.1429 |
0.03838 |
98 |
85 |
12 |
1 |
2146 |
I thought remote work would be great for everyone . But then came the on-camera dress code for zoom… If I’d have known, I would have never signed up to be a lifeguard. |
1.1429 |
0.03689 |
91 |
78 |
13 |
0 |
2147 |
I’ve only got a 15 minute break |
1.1429 |
0.04527 |
84 |
74 |
8 |
2 |
2148 |
It seems I misunderstood you when you said you ‘needed help with your business’ splash page’… |
1.1429 |
0.04351 |
98 |
87 |
8 |
3 |
2149 |
This way, I don’t have to get up to pee. |
1.1429 |
0.04103 |
98 |
86 |
10 |
2 |
2150 |
I'm asking Google why everyone in this pool is white. |
1.1429 |
0.04198 |
84 |
73 |
10 |
1 |
2151 |
Cesspool. |
1.1429 |
0.04198 |
84 |
73 |
10 |
1 |
2152 |
I prefer to think of it as ‘work-life buoyancy’ |
1.1429 |
0.05135 |
77 |
69 |
5 |
3 |
2153 |
Work from Pool" day |
1.1429 |
0.03838 |
98 |
85 |
12 |
1 |
2154 |
I thought it was laptop swim. |
1.1429 |
0.04300 |
91 |
80 |
9 |
2 |
2155 |
To submit your caption, leave it as a comment below with the hashtag |
1.1414 |
0.04543 |
99 |
89 |
6 |
4 |
2156 |
Yes, but at the end of the day, aren’t we all really just a bunch of suits? |
1.1414 |
0.04543 |
99 |
89 |
6 |
4 |
2157 |
My wife was using the tub |
1.1413 |
0.03652 |
92 |
79 |
13 |
0 |
2158 |
You didn't happen to swim into a green Buick? |
1.1413 |
0.04528 |
92 |
82 |
7 |
3 |
2159 |
It's cheaper than a standing desk. |
1.1413 |
0.04784 |
92 |
83 |
5 |
4 |
2160 |
...and the last four digits of your social security number? |
1.1413 |
0.04256 |
92 |
81 |
9 |
2 |
2161 |
It's two hours after eating to swim, three hours after eating to check emails. |
1.1413 |
0.03965 |
92 |
80 |
11 |
1 |
2162 |
AND I save on dry cleaning! |
1.1413 |
0.03965 |
92 |
80 |
11 |
1 |
2163 |
Yes, I'm an attorney. How did you know? |
1.1413 |
0.04256 |
92 |
81 |
9 |
2 |
2164 |
I'm here to help you extend your car warranty. |
1.1413 |
0.04256 |
92 |
81 |
9 |
2 |
2165 |
I thought you told me to bring my suit. |
1.1413 |
0.03965 |
92 |
80 |
11 |
1 |
2166 |
It's the latest trend after "Work from Home." It's called "Work from Vacation." |
1.1413 |
0.04256 |
92 |
81 |
9 |
2 |
2167 |
It’s Zoom, you can be anywhere from the waist down. |
1.1413 |
0.04256 |
92 |
81 |
9 |
2 |
2168 |
I'm not streaming, I'm pooling. |
1.1413 |
0.04256 |
92 |
81 |
9 |
2 |
2169 |
No, I don't want to play Marco Polo |
1.1413 |
0.04256 |
92 |
81 |
9 |
2 |
2170 |
Stop being so shallow, Bob. |
1.1413 |
0.04528 |
92 |
82 |
7 |
3 |
2171 |
Sometimes, I feel like I'm just treading water at work. |
1.1413 |
0.03965 |
92 |
80 |
11 |
1 |
2172 |
I can’t explain it. I just excel in the water. |
1.1413 |
0.03965 |
92 |
80 |
11 |
1 |
2173 |
You wouldn’t happen to know the wifi password by chance |
1.1413 |
0.04256 |
92 |
81 |
9 |
2 |
2174 |
They told me to work harder and keep my head above water |
1.1413 |
0.04256 |
92 |
81 |
9 |
2 |
2175 |
I’m sure there are multiple explanations for this red dye cloud. |
1.1412 |
0.04779 |
85 |
76 |
6 |
3 |
2176 |
As I was saying, I’m absolutely drowning in work. |
1.1412 |
0.04779 |
85 |
76 |
6 |
3 |
2177 |
I know you said it was an accident, but as your lawyer I must warn you that peeing in the pool is frowned upon around here. |
1.1412 |
0.04152 |
85 |
74 |
10 |
1 |
2178 |
I decided that I might as well be literally, instead of merely figuratively, swimming in work. |
1.1412 |
0.04476 |
85 |
75 |
8 |
2 |
2179 |
Practicing compassion for clients who homes are flooded. |
1.1412 |
0.04476 |
85 |
75 |
8 |
2 |
2180 |
And my title is: 'Wacky Suicide Attempts'. |
1.1412 |
0.03799 |
85 |
73 |
12 |
0 |
2181 |
I just need to hop on this zoom meeting and the rest of the day I'm yours. |
1.1412 |
0.04152 |
85 |
74 |
10 |
1 |
2182 |
Working from home during the summer is highly recommended. |
1.1412 |
0.04779 |
85 |
76 |
6 |
3 |
2183 |
This must be my watershed moment. |
1.1412 |
0.04152 |
85 |
74 |
10 |
1 |
2184 |
Can you start Monday? If not, there another applicants in the pool. |
1.1412 |
0.04779 |
85 |
76 |
6 |
3 |
2185 |
I used to carpool to work, and then one day it just hit me! |
1.1412 |
0.03799 |
85 |
73 |
12 |
0 |
2186 |
Call me crazy now, but I'm definitely being promoted to the jacuzzi |
1.1412 |
0.04476 |
85 |
75 |
8 |
2 |
2187 |
It’s actually better for my back |
1.1412 |
0.04152 |
85 |
74 |
10 |
1 |
2188 |
One last question and I’ll let you go.. |
1.1412 |
0.04779 |
85 |
76 |
6 |
3 |
2189 |
Because the internet never sleeps, Phil. It keeps going and going and going… |
1.1412 |
0.04152 |
85 |
74 |
10 |
1 |
2190 |
I am not wearing a wire. I understand this is classified information, but I just want to retrieve my amazon password. |
1.1412 |
0.04152 |
85 |
74 |
10 |
1 |
2191 |
To better insure you, we’ll need to see your back-stoke. |
1.1412 |
0.04779 |
85 |
76 |
6 |
3 |
2192 |
I’ve been trying to reach you about your vehicle’s extended warranty. |
1.1412 |
0.04476 |
85 |
75 |
8 |
2 |
2193 |
Why would I bring my standing desk on vacation? |
1.1410 |
0.03966 |
78 |
67 |
11 |
0 |
2194 |
Any suggestions for a caption for this cartoon I am submitting before I go to work? |
1.1410 |
0.04732 |
78 |
69 |
7 |
2 |
2195 |
It's called multi-tasking, my friend. |
1.1410 |
0.05072 |
78 |
70 |
5 |
3 |
2196 |
I'm sorry, but this is the 'checking email' lane." |
1.1410 |
0.04732 |
78 |
69 |
7 |
2 |
2197 |
You tell me one more time, 'Relax, Carl, you're on vacation', I'll hack your Facebook page and post a photo of you in that banana hammock. |
1.1410 |
0.05072 |
78 |
70 |
5 |
3 |
2198 |
I’m trading stocks. If they go belly-up, I go belly-up and I feel great. |
1.1410 |
0.04366 |
78 |
68 |
9 |
1 |
2199 |
Nope, only the part I'm standing in is deductib!e. |
1.1410 |
0.05072 |
78 |
70 |
5 |
3 |
2200 |
Herb, what's with the outfit ? |
1.1410 |
0.04366 |
78 |
68 |
9 |
1 |
2201 |
I approve liquid loans. |
1.1410 |
0.05072 |
78 |
70 |
5 |
3 |
2202 |
Looking for a life-work balance. |
1.1410 |
0.04366 |
78 |
68 |
9 |
1 |
2203 |
Management rejected my suggestion for a jacuzzi in the break room; they offered me this instead. |
1.1410 |
0.04732 |
78 |
69 |
7 |
2 |
2204 |
So, what brings you here? |
1.1410 |
0.04366 |
78 |
68 |
9 |
1 |
2205 |
Once I file my transfer of workplace request it should all work out swimmingly. |
1.1410 |
0.04732 |
78 |
69 |
7 |
2 |
2206 |
We had to expand our investment pool. |
1.1410 |
0.04366 |
78 |
68 |
9 |
1 |
2207 |
Didn’t you know this is why it’s called a “lap” top? |
1.1410 |
0.04732 |
78 |
69 |
7 |
2 |
2208 |
I hope they do not make us return to the office |
1.1410 |
0.03966 |
78 |
67 |
11 |
0 |
2209 |
Once in a while I like to work like a fish out of water |
1.1410 |
0.04732 |
78 |
69 |
7 |
2 |
2210 |
I’m half ready to admit I’m out of my depth here” |
1.1410 |
0.04366 |
78 |
68 |
9 |
1 |
2211 |
The economy took a dip and so did I. |
1.1408 |
0.05418 |
71 |
64 |
4 |
3 |
2212 |
I'm here because you entered into a life insurance pool. |
1.1408 |
0.05033 |
71 |
63 |
6 |
2 |
2213 |
we've been trying to reach you regarding your extended auto warranty, is now a good time to chat? |
1.1408 |
0.04616 |
71 |
62 |
8 |
1 |
2214 |
what are you looking at? This is my kind of exercise... digital. |
1.1400 |
0.03766 |
100 |
87 |
12 |
1 |
2215 |
I always have a hard time using the bathroom at work. |
1.1400 |
0.03766 |
100 |
87 |
12 |
1 |
2216 |
Let’s soak you a little bit more on management fees.” |
1.1400 |
0.04025 |
100 |
88 |
10 |
2 |
2217 |
Yeah, remote work has really messed up my vacation days |
1.1400 |
0.04025 |
100 |
88 |
10 |
2 |
2218 |
It’s just a ten-minute survey about surveys. |
1.1400 |
0.03766 |
100 |
87 |
12 |
1 |
2219 |
I always interview people for my articles in person. |
1.1400 |
0.03487 |
100 |
86 |
14 |
0 |
2220 |
I'm just a little underwater right now. |
1.1400 |
0.03766 |
100 |
87 |
12 |
1 |
2221 |
Gotta improve that keystroke! |
1.1400 |
0.04025 |
100 |
88 |
10 |
2 |
2222 |
Do you identfy as wet? |
1.1398 |
0.04481 |
93 |
83 |
7 |
3 |
2223 |
And,I don’t have to waist time on bathroom breaks. |
1.1398 |
0.03925 |
93 |
81 |
11 |
1 |
2224 |
They closed the men's washrooms in our office . |
1.1398 |
0.04735 |
93 |
84 |
5 |
4 |
2225 |
It helps keep my hemorrhoids in check.” |
1.1398 |
0.04213 |
93 |
82 |
9 |
2 |
2226 |
Me? I’m just here for the free Wi-Fi. |
1.1398 |
0.03925 |
93 |
81 |
11 |
1 |
2227 |
I like to believe I'm on a beach in Hawaii |
1.1398 |
0.03925 |
93 |
81 |
11 |
1 |
2228 |
I’m a re-moat worker. |
1.1398 |
0.03615 |
93 |
80 |
13 |
0 |
2229 |
Let me know if you need anything looked up. |
1.1398 |
0.03615 |
93 |
80 |
13 |
0 |
2230 |
I thought the ad said show up and do laptops, not laps |
1.1398 |
0.04481 |
93 |
83 |
7 |
3 |
2231 |
Do you want that warranty with the exclusive pool exclusion? |
1.1398 |
0.04213 |
93 |
82 |
9 |
2 |
2232 |
It's called "method writing". I'm writing about the recent floods. Not looking forward to the upcoming wildfires. |
1.1398 |
0.03925 |
93 |
81 |
11 |
1 |
2233 |
How do you like my new swim suit? |
1.1398 |
0.04213 |
93 |
82 |
9 |
2 |
2234 |
As your accountant, I’m not a fan of so much liquidity |
1.1398 |
0.03925 |
93 |
81 |
11 |
1 |
2235 |
Everyone at work said the filter backgrounds I use on Zoom are fake |
1.1398 |
0.03925 |
93 |
81 |
11 |
1 |
2236 |
working remotely has really freed me up to enjoy the finer things in life. |
1.1398 |
0.04213 |
93 |
82 |
9 |
2 |
2237 |
Hybrid work, as in, you can work during your vacation. |
1.1398 |
0.03925 |
93 |
81 |
11 |
1 |
2238 |
I am drowning in work lately, came here to make things literal. |
1.1398 |
0.03925 |
93 |
81 |
11 |
1 |
2239 |
Knee deep? I think it’s hip deep at this point |
1.1398 |
0.04213 |
93 |
82 |
9 |
2 |
2240 |
I AM participating. Just tell me when my kid’s race is up. |
1.1395 |
0.04726 |
86 |
77 |
6 |
3 |
2241 |
It's called part remote work, as in only part of me is working. |
1.1395 |
0.04427 |
86 |
76 |
8 |
2 |
2242 |
I'm in liquidity management. |
1.1395 |
0.03758 |
86 |
74 |
12 |
0 |
2243 |
Your insurance policy doesn’t cover water in ear. |
1.1395 |
0.03758 |
86 |
74 |
12 |
0 |
2244 |
Key strokes ARE strokes. |
1.1395 |
0.04726 |
86 |
77 |
6 |
3 |
2245 |
This poolside Peloton app still needs some wringing-out. |
1.1395 |
0.04427 |
86 |
76 |
8 |
2 |
2246 |
In this economy most of my clients are treading water. |
1.1395 |
0.04106 |
86 |
75 |
10 |
1 |
2247 |
My boss said it was time to really dive in and get my feet wet. |
1.1395 |
0.04106 |
86 |
75 |
10 |
1 |
2248 |
I won't be long, I'm just here to pee. |
1.1395 |
0.04427 |
86 |
76 |
8 |
2 |
2249 |
They don't call it "adult swim" for nothing. |
1.1395 |
0.04427 |
86 |
76 |
8 |
2 |
2250 |
Just checking out the applicant pool! |
1.1395 |
0.05007 |
86 |
78 |
4 |
4 |
2251 |
We have a liquidity problem. |
1.1395 |
0.04106 |
86 |
75 |
10 |
1 |
2252 |
This way, I write shorter emails. |
1.1395 |
0.03758 |
86 |
74 |
12 |
0 |
2253 |
Working remotely has its benefits. |
1.1395 |
0.04106 |
86 |
75 |
10 |
1 |
2254 |
I'm conflicted. |
1.1395 |
0.04106 |
86 |
75 |
10 |
1 |
2255 |
Breast stroke, key stroke: it's all the same to me. |
1.1395 |
0.04726 |
86 |
77 |
6 |
3 |
2256 |
Pool office is the new black. |
1.1395 |
0.04106 |
86 |
75 |
10 |
1 |
2257 |
Unlimited PTO's a scam. |
1.1395 |
0.04106 |
86 |
75 |
10 |
1 |
2258 |
Oh. I thought it was a laps top |
1.1395 |
0.04427 |
86 |
76 |
8 |
2 |
2259 |
Summer Fridays are getting weird with the new wfm culture from management. |
1.1395 |
0.04427 |
86 |
76 |
8 |
2 |
2260 |
The manager wants us to liquidate our assets. |
1.1395 |
0.04726 |
86 |
77 |
6 |
3 |
2261 |
It’s not too bad. You really save time on bathroom breaks |
1.1395 |
0.03758 |
86 |
74 |
12 |
0 |
2262 |
Sorry, I thought this was adult swim |
1.1395 |
0.04106 |
86 |
75 |
10 |
1 |
2263 |
I’ve just been put in charge of the weekly office pool. |
1.1392 |
0.04314 |
79 |
69 |
9 |
1 |
2264 |
My clients insist their investments stay above water at all times. |
1.1392 |
0.04314 |
79 |
69 |
9 |
1 |
2265 |
What does it look like I’m doing? I’m relaxing. |
1.1392 |
0.04675 |
79 |
70 |
7 |
2 |
2266 |
Good morning, sir. Would you care to participate in our survey? |
1.1392 |
0.03920 |
79 |
68 |
11 |
0 |
2267 |
You mean this isn’t the secretarial pool? |
1.1392 |
0.04675 |
79 |
70 |
7 |
2 |
2268 |
I've double checked your investments and you're definitely under water! |
1.1392 |
0.05010 |
79 |
71 |
5 |
3 |
2269 |
My therapist advised me to get out of the office more. |
1.1392 |
0.04314 |
79 |
69 |
9 |
1 |
2270 |
I’m day treading. |
1.1392 |
0.04675 |
79 |
70 |
7 |
2 |
2271 |
I AM staying in my lane. |
1.1392 |
0.04314 |
79 |
69 |
9 |
1 |
2272 |
Don’t ask about my bottoms. |
1.1392 |
0.03920 |
79 |
68 |
11 |
0 |
2273 |
You saw my email about ‘Walk, Don’t Run’ right? |
1.1392 |
0.04314 |
79 |
69 |
9 |
1 |
2274 |
They’re renovating my office upstairs |
1.1392 |
0.03920 |
79 |
68 |
11 |
0 |
2275 |
And how many stars would you give this pool on a scale of one to five? |
1.1392 |
0.03920 |
79 |
68 |
11 |
0 |
2276 |
Sorry, I’m pretty swamped with work today |
1.1392 |
0.04675 |
79 |
70 |
7 |
2 |
2277 |
How do I blur my background? |
1.1389 |
0.03593 |
108 |
94 |
13 |
1 |
2278 |
WORKATION DIP |
1.1389 |
0.04556 |
72 |
63 |
8 |
1 |
2279 |
I know. But I’m still struggling with my Work/Life balance, |
1.1389 |
0.03343 |
108 |
93 |
15 |
0 |
2280 |
I really preferred my remote lifeguarding but they are insisting I be present 2 days a week. |
1.1389 |
0.04967 |
72 |
64 |
6 |
2 |
2281 |
I’m giving online swimming lessons. You interested? |
1.1389 |
0.04046 |
108 |
96 |
9 |
3 |
2282 |
I guard their data. |
1.1386 |
0.03731 |
101 |
88 |
12 |
1 |
2283 |
I can't talk now, I'm just swamped. |
1.1386 |
0.03731 |
101 |
88 |
12 |
1 |
2284 |
Are you STILL drowning in paperwork Johnson or would you like to join me on this call. |
1.1386 |
0.03988 |
101 |
89 |
10 |
2 |
2285 |
Unlimited paid time off |
1.1386 |
0.03731 |
101 |
88 |
12 |
1 |
2286 |
Sometimes it feels like I’m the only one who takes adult swim seriously. |
1.1385 |
0.04842 |
65 |
57 |
7 |
1 |
2287 |
I’m preparing for work-life balance in the age of global warming. |
1.1383 |
0.04170 |
94 |
83 |
9 |
2 |
2288 |
This new hybrid work guidance has gotten a little out of hand. |
1.1383 |
0.03886 |
94 |
82 |
11 |
1 |
2289 |
I was assigned to the work from home pool today. |
1.1383 |
0.04170 |
94 |
83 |
9 |
2 |
2290 |
Drowning in work,right upto my waist. |
1.1383 |
0.03886 |
94 |
82 |
11 |
1 |
2291 |
No, this is shallow learning. Deep's the other side of the pool. |
1.1383 |
0.04170 |
94 |
83 |
9 |
2 |
2292 |
Do you know the wifi password? |
1.1383 |
0.03580 |
94 |
81 |
13 |
0 |
2293 |
But I am working from home. |
1.1383 |
0.03580 |
94 |
81 |
13 |
0 |
2294 |
The men's room is closed. |
1.1383 |
0.04170 |
94 |
83 |
9 |
2 |
2295 |
...And in your estimation, how deep is the water ? |
1.1383 |
0.03886 |
94 |
82 |
11 |
1 |
2296 |
Your mortgage is under water. |
1.1383 |
0.03580 |
94 |
81 |
13 |
0 |
2297 |
I finally decided to join the office pool. |
1.1383 |
0.04170 |
94 |
83 |
9 |
2 |
2298 |
I'm just cooling off. I'm up to my waist in work. |
1.1383 |
0.04436 |
94 |
84 |
7 |
3 |
2299 |
It's better than drowning in emails. |
1.1383 |
0.04436 |
94 |
84 |
7 |
3 |
2300 |
Sorry I can’t talk right now, I’m drowning in work. |
1.1383 |
0.04170 |
94 |
83 |
9 |
2 |
2301 |
I’m just multi-tasking |
1.1383 |
0.03580 |
94 |
81 |
13 |
0 |
2302 |
It’s called work life balance, Alan. |
1.1383 |
0.03886 |
94 |
82 |
11 |
1 |
2303 |
I’m just really under water at work right now. |
1.1383 |
0.03886 |
94 |
82 |
11 |
1 |
2304 |
Hey, I’m workin’ here! |
1.1383 |
0.04170 |
94 |
83 |
9 |
2 |
2305 |
im fucking pissing in the pool |
1.1383 |
0.04436 |
94 |
84 |
7 |
3 |
2306 |
I told them it’s a Zoom background. |
1.1383 |
0.03886 |
94 |
82 |
11 |
1 |
2307 |
Dirty, smelly and crowded. I give this pool 1 1/2 stars. |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2308 |
I'm afraid you can't sue your brother for cheating at Marco Polo. |
1.1379 |
0.03718 |
87 |
75 |
12 |
0 |
2309 |
Sir, it’s really not that deep. |
1.1379 |
0.04062 |
87 |
76 |
10 |
1 |
2310 |
Yeah, I work for the city schools, at this point, I'll take whatever vacation time I can get. |
1.1379 |
0.03718 |
87 |
75 |
12 |
0 |
2311 |
My therapist told me to immerse myself in work. |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2312 |
Now that you've decided to pool your investments... |
1.1379 |
0.04062 |
87 |
76 |
10 |
1 |
2313 |
All your investments are underwater. |
1.1379 |
0.04062 |
87 |
76 |
10 |
1 |
2314 |
This is Step 3 in my treatment program for my on-line gambling addiction. |
1.1379 |
0.04062 |
87 |
76 |
10 |
1 |
2315 |
I messaged you ‘Marco’. Why didn’t you reply ‘Polo’? |
1.1379 |
0.04062 |
87 |
76 |
10 |
1 |
2316 |
It's a cummerbund. I'm not actually wearing any pants. |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2317 |
This isn't what I meant by saying you need more liquidity |
1.1379 |
0.04062 |
87 |
76 |
10 |
1 |
2318 |
This isn’t what you meant by work-life balance? |
1.1379 |
0.04062 |
87 |
76 |
10 |
1 |
2319 |
So you've led me to water. Now what? |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2320 |
Ok, let's get to the details of your investment goals later. Name and address, please? |
1.1379 |
0.03718 |
87 |
75 |
12 |
0 |
2321 |
What is your dip code? |
1.1379 |
0.03718 |
87 |
75 |
12 |
0 |
2322 |
I heard "wear a suit in the pool." Who knew? |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2323 |
It's just a precaution, I am Trump's attorney and my pants are not fire-retardant. |
1.1379 |
0.04674 |
87 |
78 |
6 |
3 |
2324 |
On a scale from 1 to 10, how satisfied are you with the chlorine ratio? |
1.1379 |
0.04062 |
87 |
76 |
10 |
1 |
2325 |
It's called swim-formal attire |
1.1379 |
0.03718 |
87 |
75 |
12 |
0 |
2326 |
Being productive can cost a life |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2327 |
Listen pal, if you can work on your stroke, I can work on mine! |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2328 |
I'm conditioning myself for life in the fast lane. |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2329 |
And if you sign within the next 5 minutes, you get a free scented hostess gift..."This Candle Smells Like My Swimming Pool." |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2330 |
This is the area in the resort with the best connection. |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2331 |
They told me it’s my moment to sink or swim. |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2332 |
I'm on a watertight deadline. |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2333 |
Mixing business with pleasure? Just a typical day at the office pool. |
1.1379 |
0.04379 |
87 |
77 |
8 |
2 |
2334 |
Someone said it was a laptop pool... |
1.1375 |
0.04263 |
80 |
70 |
9 |
1 |
2335 |
It's called e-swimming. |
1.1375 |
0.04950 |
80 |
72 |
5 |
3 |
2336 |
They can’t tell I’m wearing swim trunks. |
1.1375 |
0.03875 |
80 |
69 |
11 |
0 |
2337 |
Giving the new "work from anywhere" benefit a whirl. |
1.1375 |
0.04263 |
80 |
70 |
9 |
1 |
2338 |
Now it's a write-off. |
1.1375 |
0.04620 |
80 |
71 |
7 |
2 |
2339 |
I work hard, I wade hard. |
1.1375 |
0.04263 |
80 |
70 |
9 |
1 |
2340 |
I'm much more productive because I don't need to get up to pee. |
1.1375 |
0.04620 |
80 |
71 |
7 |
2 |
2341 |
Working from home is so yesterday. |
1.1375 |
0.04620 |
80 |
71 |
7 |
2 |
2342 |
Thanks for trying, but I need a hotspot, not just a warm one. |
1.1375 |
0.04620 |
80 |
71 |
7 |
2 |
2343 |
And is your family jewels’ portfolio still under water? |
1.1375 |
0.04620 |
80 |
71 |
7 |
2 |
2344 |
I’ll be out of here as soon as I log in my times |
1.1375 |
0.04620 |
80 |
71 |
7 |
2 |
2345 |
My workplace switched to a work/life integration policy. |
1.1375 |
0.04620 |
80 |
71 |
7 |
2 |
2346 |
Do you like my bathing suit? |
1.1375 |
0.03875 |
80 |
69 |
11 |
0 |
2347 |
Management told us to take advantage of our remote days. |
1.1375 |
0.04263 |
80 |
70 |
9 |
1 |
2348 |
the pool is great backdrop for the zoom call on our shallow investment offering |
1.1375 |
0.03875 |
80 |
69 |
11 |
0 |
2349 |
I find that being able to pee during my Zoom calls greatly improves my productivity |
1.1375 |
0.04620 |
80 |
71 |
7 |
2 |
2350 |
I didn’t have an MBA so they offered me a position in the typing pool |
1.1375 |
0.03875 |
80 |
69 |
11 |
0 |
2351 |
I thought it said “Laptop Lane” |
1.1375 |
0.04620 |
80 |
71 |
7 |
2 |
2352 |
More than knee deep in work here, Fred. |
1.1375 |
0.04263 |
80 |
70 |
9 |
1 |
2353 |
don’t worry they’ll just think it’s a Zoom background - I’m on mute. |
1.1375 |
0.04950 |
80 |
72 |
5 |
3 |
2354 |
I just wasn't cut out to be a shark. |
1.1373 |
0.04189 |
102 |
91 |
8 |
3 |
2355 |
Unless you put more into your retirement plan, you’ll have trouble keeping your head above water. |
1.1373 |
0.03697 |
102 |
89 |
12 |
1 |
2356 |
They just told me to clear out and go swim with the rest of the losers. |
1.1373 |
0.03697 |
102 |
89 |
12 |
1 |
2357 |
Damn GPS! |
1.1373 |
0.03951 |
102 |
90 |
10 |
2 |
2358 |
This is a laptop, the best lap. |
1.1373 |
0.03951 |
102 |
90 |
10 |
2 |
2359 |
They called “Adult Swim” before my meeting ended. |
1.1373 |
0.04189 |
102 |
91 |
8 |
3 |
2360 |
Ma’am- you’re interrupting my Zoom background. |
1.1373 |
0.03697 |
102 |
89 |
12 |
1 |
2361 |
As your financial advisor, I just wanted you to know there's a tax write off for your club membership. |
1.1370 |
0.04052 |
73 |
63 |
10 |
0 |
2362 |
This way I can keep cool, work and play at the same time |
1.1370 |
0.04497 |
73 |
64 |
8 |
1 |
2363 |
I was just in the area and wanted to talk to you about a gift to your alma mater. |
1.1370 |
0.04902 |
73 |
65 |
6 |
2 |
2364 |
‘Sorry pal, this is the life-on-the-fast-lane-lane’ |
1.1370 |
0.04052 |
73 |
63 |
10 |
0 |
2365 |
I’m doing the computer key stroke if you must know. |
1.1368 |
0.04129 |
95 |
84 |
9 |
2 |
2366 |
The wifi flows better here |
1.1368 |
0.03848 |
95 |
83 |
11 |
1 |
2367 |
I have a very short lunch break. |
1.1368 |
0.04129 |
95 |
84 |
9 |
2 |
2368 |
I'm pooling my resources. |
1.1368 |
0.04129 |
95 |
84 |
9 |
2 |
2369 |
It's a bit old-fashioned, but I still believe in having a typing pool. |
1.1368 |
0.03848 |
95 |
83 |
11 |
1 |
2370 |
I find work-life balance overrated. |
1.1368 |
0.03848 |
95 |
83 |
11 |
1 |
2371 |
This is my Baptism of working remotely! |
1.1368 |
0.03848 |
95 |
83 |
11 |
1 |
2372 |
The last email said that the Zoom meeting would be in the pool. |
1.1368 |
0.04391 |
95 |
85 |
7 |
3 |
2373 |
I told my boss I needed a better work-life balance. |
1.1368 |
0.04129 |
95 |
84 |
9 |
2 |
2374 |
I've just tested our fiber network and confirmed it works across various channels. |
1.1368 |
0.04129 |
95 |
84 |
9 |
2 |
2375 |
I misunderstood “office pool”, and now I’m too proud to admit it to my coworkers. |
1.1368 |
0.03848 |
95 |
83 |
11 |
1 |
2376 |
. “Sorry, I had to pee.” |
1.1368 |
0.04639 |
95 |
86 |
5 |
4 |
2377 |
I'm working on the company's splash page. |
1.1364 |
0.04331 |
88 |
78 |
8 |
2 |
2378 |
My boss told me to get some down time. |
1.1364 |
0.04331 |
88 |
78 |
8 |
2 |
2379 |
I WAS up to my eyeballs. |
1.1364 |
0.03679 |
88 |
76 |
12 |
0 |
2380 |
Its alot easier to interview people intheir natural surroundings, but my pants take a beating! |
1.1364 |
0.04019 |
88 |
77 |
10 |
1 |
2381 |
Wait,hold on. Let me mute this Zoom. |
1.1364 |
0.04019 |
88 |
77 |
10 |
1 |
2382 |
It’s one of the seven habits of highly successful people. |
1.1364 |
0.04331 |
88 |
78 |
8 |
2 |
2383 |
I needed a good zoom background. |
1.1364 |
0.04623 |
88 |
79 |
6 |
3 |
2384 |
Stay in your swim lane, the boss said. |
1.1364 |
0.04019 |
88 |
77 |
10 |
1 |
2385 |
We got remote work, but management wouldn't budge on the dress code. |
1.1364 |
0.04331 |
88 |
78 |
8 |
2 |
2386 |
Unfortunately, your finances are under water. |
1.1364 |
0.04773 |
66 |
58 |
7 |
1 |
2387 |
I can't wet my pants, but I can soil them... |
1.1364 |
0.03976 |
110 |
98 |
9 |
3 |
2388 |
How do you spell workaholic? |
1.1364 |
0.04331 |
88 |
78 |
8 |
2 |
2389 |
Be honest - do I seem out of place? |
1.1364 |
0.03679 |
88 |
76 |
12 |
0 |
2390 |
I go to great lengths for free WiFi. |
1.1364 |
0.04019 |
88 |
77 |
10 |
1 |
2391 |
"Sir, please, this is the lap lane, not the laptop lane." |
1.1364 |
0.04623 |
88 |
79 |
6 |
3 |
2392 |
Sorry, this my usual lane. |
1.1364 |
0.04019 |
88 |
77 |
10 |
1 |
2393 |
What, you've never seen anyone in an office pool? |
1.1364 |
0.04019 |
88 |
77 |
10 |
1 |
2394 |
So, as a regular user, would you say that, in a typical week, you come to this pool 1-2 days, 3-5 days, or 6-7 days? |
1.1364 |
0.04331 |
88 |
78 |
8 |
2 |
2395 |
The best part about zoom is that I never have to wear anything on the bottom |
1.1364 |
0.04019 |
88 |
77 |
10 |
1 |
2396 |
You have to dive in when you have the liquidity. |
1.1364 |
0.04019 |
88 |
77 |
10 |
1 |
2397 |
I’m practicing the hybrid work environment |
1.1364 |
0.04019 |
88 |
77 |
10 |
1 |
2398 |
A consultant recommended that they expand both the office pool and remote work. This is what they came up with. |
1.1359 |
0.03914 |
103 |
91 |
10 |
2 |
2399 |
It helps me relax. |
1.1358 |
0.04892 |
81 |
73 |
5 |
3 |
2400 |
You know what they say, ‘All work and no play…’ |
1.1358 |
0.04214 |
81 |
71 |
9 |
1 |
2401 |
My new boss told me to jump in at the deep end. |
1.1358 |
0.03830 |
81 |
70 |
11 |
0 |
2402 |
My virtual background is on... |
1.1358 |
0.03830 |
81 |
70 |
11 |
0 |
2403 |
I'm out of vacation days. |
1.1358 |
0.04214 |
81 |
71 |
9 |
1 |
2404 |
I'm swimming laps - virtually.... |
1.1358 |
0.04565 |
81 |
72 |
7 |
2 |
2405 |
Do you know how much they charge for office space in New York?! |
1.1358 |
0.04214 |
81 |
71 |
9 |
1 |
2406 |
I run the officer pool |
1.1358 |
0.04214 |
81 |
71 |
9 |
1 |
2407 |
Since Covid I’ve really enjoyed working from home, so please don’t splash by me. |
1.1358 |
0.03830 |
81 |
70 |
11 |
0 |
2408 |
I can get you a lower premium if you can swim a 50 in a minute or less |
1.1358 |
0.04214 |
81 |
71 |
9 |
1 |
2409 |
My therapist says I need to connect my leisure life with my work life. |
1.1358 |
0.04214 |
81 |
71 |
9 |
1 |
2410 |
Work from home allows me to work from anywhere. |
1.1358 |
0.03830 |
81 |
70 |
11 |
0 |
2411 |
For later this morning, I am scheduling a skydiving/international board meeting.
And then this afternoon, spelunking/virtual chess. |
1.1358 |
0.04565 |
81 |
72 |
7 |
2 |
2412 |
So, you're going with the 25-year term life insurance? |
1.1358 |
0.04565 |
81 |
72 |
7 |
2 |
2413 |
Yes, I did see your out-of-office message. What about it? |
1.1358 |
0.04214 |
81 |
71 |
9 |
1 |
2414 |
Pool laps? I heard pool laptops. |
1.1358 |
0.04565 |
81 |
72 |
7 |
2 |
2415 |
I'm never going back to the office. |
1.1358 |
0.04565 |
81 |
72 |
7 |
2 |
2416 |
Just make sure to circle back. |
1.1358 |
0.03830 |
81 |
70 |
11 |
0 |
2417 |
Let me know when you want to circle back... |
1.1358 |
0.04214 |
81 |
71 |
9 |
1 |
2418 |
I hate deadlines on weekends |
1.1358 |
0.03830 |
81 |
70 |
11 |
0 |
2419 |
What's a 5-letter word containing the letters s, p and l? |
1.1354 |
0.04088 |
96 |
85 |
9 |
2 |
2420 |
Stick to your laps and leave my laptop alone. |
1.1354 |
0.03511 |
96 |
83 |
13 |
0 |
2421 |
It’s not the ideal place for a colonoscopy, but I’m remote only. |
1.1354 |
0.04348 |
96 |
86 |
7 |
3 |
2422 |
You may be afloat but your stock portfolio is under water |
1.1354 |
0.03810 |
96 |
84 |
11 |
1 |
2423 |
I’d like to talk to you about your car’s extended warranty |
1.1354 |
0.04348 |
96 |
86 |
7 |
3 |
2424 |
Not everyone can afford a desk treadmill, Terri. |
1.1354 |
0.03810 |
96 |
84 |
11 |
1 |
2425 |
It’s a sink or swim industry |
1.1354 |
0.03810 |
96 |
84 |
11 |
1 |
2426 |
Yes, the Swiss have a navy, but they're neutral, so stand down! |
1.1351 |
0.05207 |
74 |
67 |
4 |
3 |
2427 |
AI instructed me to 'cool it'. |
1.1351 |
0.04839 |
74 |
66 |
6 |
2 |
2428 |
I’m trying to recalibrate my work-life balance. |
1.1351 |
0.04001 |
74 |
64 |
10 |
0 |
2429 |
The standing desk just wasn’t enough |
1.1351 |
0.04440 |
74 |
65 |
8 |
1 |
2430 |
Yes, I did take a shower before getting in the pool. |
1.1348 |
0.03976 |
89 |
78 |
10 |
1 |
2431 |
FYI, I just peed." |
1.1348 |
0.03976 |
89 |
78 |
10 |
1 |
2432 |
They think I'm working from home. |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2433 |
Actually it's not that difficult to balance vacation with work. I'm standing on my unpaid intern. |
1.1348 |
0.03976 |
89 |
78 |
10 |
1 |
2434 |
By my calculations you have approximately 5000 more laps to go to achieve your desired weight ! |
1.1348 |
0.03976 |
89 |
78 |
10 |
1 |
2435 |
I'm searching videos on how to enjoy time with friends in a swimming pool! |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2436 |
Besides break dancing, the Olympics has added aquatic coding. |
1.1348 |
0.03976 |
89 |
78 |
10 |
1 |
2437 |
My office bathroom is out of order. |
1.1348 |
0.03976 |
89 |
78 |
10 |
1 |
2438 |
Today was my work from pool day. |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2439 |
New corporate policy, unlimited vacations. |
1.1348 |
0.03976 |
89 |
78 |
10 |
1 |
2440 |
This ain't no party, this ain't no disco. This ain't no fooling around.
No time for dancing, or lovey-dovey. I ain't got time for that now. |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2441 |
My battery’s getting low is there an outlet nearby? |
1.1348 |
0.03976 |
89 |
78 |
10 |
1 |
2442 |
I’m just answering a few emails- I can stop any time. |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2443 |
Looks like my investments, and I, are now underwater. |
1.1348 |
0.03976 |
89 |
78 |
10 |
1 |
2444 |
We can't work from home, but I found a loophole. |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2445 |
I’m doing a deep search. |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2446 |
At least I'm not drowning in work. |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2447 |
I'm just wading through my emails. |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2448 |
No I can’t come with you on the water slide, some of us have to work for a living |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2449 |
I couldn’t figure out how to turn on my Out of Office messages |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2450 |
We decided on a more literal approach to liquidating our assets. |
1.1348 |
0.03976 |
89 |
78 |
10 |
1 |
2451 |
Can I ask you a few questions about your car’s extended warranty? This will just take a minute |
1.1348 |
0.04285 |
89 |
79 |
8 |
2 |
2452 |
I'm used to it boss. When I work from home I'm usually in the pool. |
1.1346 |
0.04112 |
104 |
93 |
8 |
3 |
2453 |
Trying to keep my assets very liquid these days |
1.1343 |
0.05164 |
67 |
60 |
5 |
2 |
2454 |
I would sweat it; you're not just swimming, but drowning in debt! |
1.1341 |
0.03787 |
82 |
71 |
11 |
0 |
2455 |
It's casual Friday. I never wear a jacket for work on those days. |
1.1341 |
0.04835 |
82 |
74 |
5 |
3 |
2456 |
...Baby steps before I return full time to the office |
1.1341 |
0.04512 |
82 |
73 |
7 |
2 |
2457 |
I'm testing the waters on working remotely. |
1.1341 |
0.04165 |
82 |
72 |
9 |
1 |
2458 |
I'm testing a new drip-dry suit for the government. |
1.1341 |
0.04835 |
82 |
74 |
5 |
3 |
2459 |
My wife insisted I get out of the office and get my feet wet in some kind of recreation, so I'm going her one better. |
1.1341 |
0.04165 |
82 |
72 |
9 |
1 |
2460 |
Tried the ocean, but settled for the pool to surf the internet. |
1.1341 |
0.04165 |
82 |
72 |
9 |
1 |
2461 |
It just saeemed appropriate since all of your investments are "under water". |
1.1341 |
0.04165 |
82 |
72 |
9 |
1 |
2462 |
And I know enough to keep my rear covered and my head above water. |
1.1341 |
0.04512 |
82 |
73 |
7 |
2 |
2463 |
This IS vacation for us at 3M |
1.1341 |
0.04512 |
82 |
73 |
7 |
2 |
2464 |
My boss said "I should pool my resources."
Rosemary Shannon, Easton, PA |
1.1341 |
0.04165 |
82 |
72 |
9 |
1 |
2465 |
It’s okay. I’m not in the deep end. |
1.1341 |
0.03787 |
82 |
71 |
11 |
0 |
2466 |
No, sir, your policy does not cover drowning, so I'm afraid you'll have to restrict your swimming to the shallow end. |
1.1341 |
0.04835 |
82 |
74 |
5 |
3 |
2467 |
Simple really: Dad’s an accountant. Mom’s a homemaker and mermaid |
1.1341 |
0.04165 |
82 |
72 |
9 |
1 |
2468 |
I’m typing as fast as I can. |
1.1341 |
0.03787 |
82 |
71 |
11 |
0 |
2469 |
The boss told our team to pool our resources to come up with a new idea. |
1.1341 |
0.04165 |
82 |
72 |
9 |
1 |
2470 |
It hasn't been easy keeping the business above water. |
1.1341 |
0.04165 |
82 |
72 |
9 |
1 |
2471 |
I’ve been practicing my keystroke |
1.1341 |
0.04165 |
82 |
72 |
9 |
1 |
2472 |
Actually, I have my suit on under this “ |
1.1341 |
0.04512 |
82 |
73 |
7 |
2 |
2473 |
I’m too far away from the coast to surf the web, so this was the next best thing. |
1.1341 |
0.05137 |
82 |
75 |
3 |
4 |
2474 |
I am almost done floating through these emails |
1.1341 |
0.04165 |
82 |
72 |
9 |
1 |
2475 |
I told you I’m always available so let’s go over the differences between whole, universal, and term life insurance so we can lock you down with what works best for your needs |
1.1341 |
0.04512 |
82 |
73 |
7 |
2 |
2476 |
Can you stop splashing? I'm trying to send an email. |
1.1340 |
0.03773 |
97 |
85 |
11 |
1 |
2477 |
I work more effectively when I’m wet. |
1.1340 |
0.03773 |
97 |
85 |
11 |
1 |
2478 |
I'm researching the possibility of working while cooling my lower extremities. |
1.1340 |
0.03773 |
97 |
85 |
11 |
1 |
2479 |
Careful, this thing has a lithium battery pack. |
1.1340 |
0.03773 |
97 |
85 |
11 |
1 |
2480 |
Lifeguards also get emails |
1.1340 |
0.03477 |
97 |
84 |
13 |
0 |
2481 |
Do you have a bathing-caps-lock? |
1.1340 |
0.04048 |
97 |
86 |
9 |
2 |
2482 |
I need to gradually convert from office to beach body. |
1.1340 |
0.03477 |
97 |
84 |
13 |
0 |
2483 |
We can't deduct body oil but are you swimming for medical reasons? |
1.1340 |
0.03773 |
97 |
85 |
11 |
1 |
2484 |
Yes, I showered before entering the pool. |
1.1340 |
0.04048 |
97 |
86 |
9 |
2 |
2485 |
Sometimes WFH is WTF. |
1.1339 |
0.04109 |
112 |
101 |
7 |
4 |
2486 |
They've relocated me to the pool to minimize risk. |
1.1333 |
0.04384 |
75 |
66 |
8 |
1 |
2487 |
It's called work-life balance. |
1.1333 |
0.03603 |
90 |
78 |
12 |
0 |
2488 |
Management is so shallow they think I'm in the office today. |
1.1333 |
0.03935 |
90 |
79 |
10 |
1 |
2489 |
Losing count of your laps? |
1.1333 |
0.03935 |
90 |
79 |
10 |
1 |
2490 |
Laptop. Why do you ask? |
1.1333 |
0.03603 |
90 |
78 |
12 |
0 |
2491 |
I'm training to be a lobbyist. |
1.1333 |
0.03603 |
90 |
78 |
12 |
0 |
2492 |
The bathroom in my office isn't working. |
1.1333 |
0.03935 |
90 |
79 |
10 |
1 |
2493 |
You never completed our post-purchase survey; does your bathing suit fit as described? |
1.1333 |
0.04525 |
90 |
81 |
6 |
3 |
2494 |
Actually, I *won* the office pool. |
1.1333 |
0.04240 |
90 |
80 |
8 |
2 |
2495 |
Diving pool, I thought it was the typing pool |
1.1333 |
0.04240 |
90 |
80 |
8 |
2 |
2496 |
One day I’ll make partner. |
1.1333 |
0.03935 |
90 |
79 |
10 |
1 |
2497 |
Now about your extended car warranty... |
1.1333 |
0.05141 |
75 |
68 |
4 |
3 |
2498 |
Gotta love Summer Fridays... |
1.1333 |
0.04777 |
75 |
67 |
6 |
2 |
2499 |
Sorry. I have no reservation for that name. |
1.1333 |
0.04525 |
90 |
81 |
6 |
3 |
2500 |
Let me just send this last email. |
1.1333 |
0.04384 |
75 |
66 |
8 |
1 |
2501 |
I'm 'aquacommuting.' Working from home is so 2021. |
1.1333 |
0.05141 |
75 |
68 |
4 |
3 |
2502 |
This is the closest my boss will let me get to a real vacation. |
1.1333 |
0.04240 |
90 |
80 |
8 |
2 |
2503 |
Am I not what you expected when you ordered a fitness tracker? |
1.1333 |
0.05480 |
75 |
69 |
2 |
4 |
2504 |
It says you can't get out now, you can't ever get out. |
1.1333 |
0.03935 |
90 |
79 |
10 |
1 |
2505 |
It's all about time management. I no longer need to interrupt my workflow for bathroom breaks. |
1.1333 |
0.03935 |
90 |
79 |
10 |
1 |
2506 |
I only handle clients who are underwater. |
1.1333 |
0.04793 |
90 |
82 |
4 |
4 |
2507 |
How do I upload a virtual background? |
1.1333 |
0.03598 |
105 |
92 |
12 |
1 |
2508 |
Allen Edmonds. Why? |
1.1333 |
0.03603 |
90 |
78 |
12 |
0 |
2509 |
It's my nephew's Bar Mitzvah... |
1.1333 |
0.03935 |
90 |
79 |
10 |
1 |
2510 |
Can you not splash? I’m work from Home |
1.1333 |
0.03844 |
105 |
93 |
10 |
2 |
2511 |
My boss suggested I use some of my unlimited PTO and take a vacation. |
1.1333 |
0.04525 |
90 |
81 |
6 |
3 |
2512 |
Ya, I use my treadmill desk in the winter time. |
1.1333 |
0.04240 |
90 |
80 |
8 |
2 |
2513 |
Since we don’t allow emails to employees on vacation, I thought I’d stop by in person. |
1.1333 |
0.04384 |
75 |
66 |
8 |
1 |
2514 |
It’s called the circling back-stroke. |
1.1333 |
0.03935 |
90 |
79 |
10 |
1 |
2515 |
I heard ‘diving into work’ was the next big trend. Am I doing it right? |
1.1333 |
0.04240 |
90 |
80 |
8 |
2 |
2516 |
Don’t be surprised. I’m from the Bay Area. |
1.1333 |
0.03935 |
90 |
79 |
10 |
1 |
2517 |
I'm going to be on the TV show 'Shark Tank' next week. Just thought I'd be prepared for anything. |
1.1333 |
0.04777 |
75 |
67 |
6 |
2 |
2518 |
They took my desk, fired me, and suggested I use the office pool if I wanted to be rehired. |
1.1327 |
0.04009 |
98 |
87 |
9 |
2 |
2519 |
I’m so fortunate that I can telecommute. |
1.1327 |
0.04009 |
98 |
87 |
9 |
2 |
2520 |
I understand what you are saying but I am quite sure you have not explored yet how much ai can improve your swimming skills |
1.1327 |
0.04263 |
98 |
88 |
7 |
3 |
2521 |
„A good work-life balance is very important to me.“ |
1.1327 |
0.04009 |
98 |
87 |
9 |
2 |
2522 |
Can you quiet down the kicking a little… everyone on this zoom thinks it’s an artificial background. |
1.1327 |
0.04009 |
98 |
87 |
9 |
2 |
2523 |
Be right with you, AI is telling me how to get in the pool and swim |
1.1327 |
0.04009 |
98 |
87 |
9 |
2 |
2524 |
Smith, Lombard and Gupta take their typing pool very seriously. |
1.1325 |
0.04461 |
83 |
74 |
7 |
2 |
2525 |
Would you be willing to work from the office sauna? |
1.1325 |
0.04461 |
83 |
74 |
7 |
2 |
2526 |
I like to flirt with stupidity. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2527 |
Well, I'd prefer the cloud |
1.1325 |
0.04779 |
83 |
75 |
5 |
3 |
2528 |
The algorithm suggests, lose 20 lbs, eat fava beans, and use flaked Cyprus salt if you want to beat Mrs. Hasbaker in the breaststroke. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2529 |
This used to be my office |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2530 |
Just a few questions about your experience. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2531 |
It’s my first week on the job and my boss wanted to get my feet wet. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2532 |
It makes my pool membership deductible. |
1.1325 |
0.04461 |
83 |
74 |
7 |
2 |
2533 |
I'm on a professional retreat." |
1.1325 |
0.04461 |
83 |
74 |
7 |
2 |
2534 |
How would you rate your witness protection program? |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2535 |
They expect us to have a professional look when working from home. |
1.1325 |
0.04461 |
83 |
74 |
7 |
2 |
2536 |
Because I’m a Merman, that’s why! |
1.1325 |
0.03744 |
83 |
72 |
11 |
0 |
2537 |
Mr. Knox! Why on earth are you schowing up at work half naked?
It’s not like it’s casual Friday or anything! |
1.1325 |
0.04779 |
83 |
75 |
5 |
3 |
2538 |
I hate to say it, but it looks like you're in hot water. |
1.1325 |
0.04461 |
83 |
74 |
7 |
2 |
2539 |
I could only get you into the high risk pool. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2540 |
I’m don’t think I’m asking for a raise this year, Raisin. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2541 |
My coworkers asked me to enter the office pool. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2542 |
I had to create a hotspot. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2543 |
My wife told me I work too much and that I need to go exercise. |
1.1325 |
0.04461 |
83 |
74 |
7 |
2 |
2544 |
Working from home had too many distractions. |
1.1325 |
0.04461 |
83 |
74 |
7 |
2 |
2545 |
There's been a noticeable shrinkage in your resources |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2546 |
I’m more of a brief’s guy. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2547 |
My boss thinks this is just another Zoom background! |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2548 |
They were very friendly when I landed the job: when I asked what it would be like, they said 'urine, in the sea, sweet', and this seemed close.'" |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2549 |
ChatGPT is teaching me to swim. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2550 |
Working from home. |
1.1325 |
0.04118 |
83 |
73 |
9 |
1 |
2551 |
I'm a consultant for the chlorine industry. |
1.1324 |
0.05091 |
68 |
61 |
5 |
2 |
2552 |
As part of your insurance audit, I will just need to know how long you can hold your breath and what your dog paddling endurance is. |
1.1324 |
0.05505 |
68 |
62 |
3 |
3 |
2553 |
I am in a cooling off period |
1.1324 |
0.04640 |
68 |
60 |
7 |
1 |
2554 |
and how did you first hear about us |
1.1324 |
0.04140 |
68 |
59 |
9 |
0 |
2555 |
I was gonna take this vacation, come hell or deep ends! |
1.1321 |
0.03809 |
106 |
94 |
10 |
2 |
2556 |
This motherfucker. |
1.1319 |
0.04742 |
91 |
83 |
4 |
4 |
2557 |
Employee of the Month" is a stretch goal |
1.1319 |
0.04477 |
91 |
82 |
6 |
3 |
2558 |
It’s a working holiday. I’m evaluating all of my bosses liquid assets… |
1.1319 |
0.04477 |
91 |
82 |
6 |
3 |
2559 |
What makes you think that I'm a type A personality? |
1.1319 |
0.03566 |
91 |
79 |
12 |
0 |
2560 |
Now that we’ve joined the pool, working on the weekend isn’t so bad…. |
1.1319 |
0.04196 |
91 |
81 |
8 |
2 |
2561 |
Half of my portfolio is underwater. |
1.1319 |
0.03894 |
91 |
80 |
10 |
1 |
2562 |
...and your retirement fund? |
1.1319 |
0.04196 |
91 |
81 |
8 |
2 |
2563 |
I didn't have enough time to get it done at home.... |
1.1319 |
0.04196 |
91 |
81 |
8 |
2 |
2564 |
Old man Jones has me swimmin’ in it! |
1.1319 |
0.03894 |
91 |
80 |
10 |
1 |
2565 |
Yes, you're the first in line. |
1.1319 |
0.04196 |
91 |
81 |
8 |
2 |
2566 |
Working from home is more than sitting in my den. |
1.1319 |
0.03894 |
91 |
80 |
10 |
1 |
2567 |
It’s called…research |
1.1319 |
0.03894 |
91 |
80 |
10 |
1 |
2568 |
And then, what happened? |
1.1319 |
0.04196 |
91 |
81 |
8 |
2 |
2569 |
I’m not sure the working holiday is for me |
1.1319 |
0.04196 |
91 |
81 |
8 |
2 |
2570 |
The boss ordered me to provide proof that I take time off. |
1.1319 |
0.04477 |
91 |
82 |
6 |
3 |
2571 |
I have a grant to study immersive experiences.
How are you feeling now? |
1.1319 |
0.03894 |
91 |
80 |
10 |
1 |
2572 |
I was afraid that the swimming cap was mandatory" |
1.1319 |
0.04742 |
91 |
83 |
4 |
4 |
2573 |
Hey, you gotta pen? |
1.1319 |
0.04196 |
91 |
81 |
8 |
2 |
2574 |
The pool concession stand is finally accepting online orders. |
1.1319 |
0.04477 |
91 |
82 |
6 |
3 |
2575 |
'The typing pool!' |
1.1319 |
0.03894 |
91 |
80 |
10 |
1 |
2576 |
My IT department hates me. |
1.1319 |
0.03566 |
91 |
79 |
12 |
0 |
2577 |
...and so, I decided to choose a full remote job... |
1.1319 |
0.04477 |
91 |
82 |
6 |
3 |
2578 |
Boss told me to take a deep dive into misunderstood colloquialisms. |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2579 |
It’s called laps tops. Great cardio. |
1.1316 |
0.03903 |
76 |
66 |
10 |
0 |
2580 |
Why no, the gang on the Zoom call cannot see my swim trunks. |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2581 |
Oh, I'm waiting. My mother said to never swim on a full stomach. |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2582 |
Oh, this is how Americans spend their PTO. |
1.1316 |
0.03903 |
76 |
66 |
10 |
0 |
2583 |
This is the lane for laptops. |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2584 |
There’s no way you can write off a rubber ducky. |
1.1316 |
0.04717 |
76 |
68 |
6 |
2 |
2585 |
…and as a member of our healthy lifestyle program, you’re enjoying a sizable discount on your insurance premium for simply agreeing to 24-7 monitoring. |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2586 |
And would you describe your experience as entirely moist,sufficiently moist,or not moist enough |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2587 |
You don't have to invest a lot, just get your feet wet. |
1.1316 |
0.03903 |
76 |
66 |
10 |
0 |
2588 |
Do you think I should float this proposal? |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2589 |
Ever think everyone else is doing Casual Friday wrong? |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2590 |
I am trying to strike a balance between back-to-the-office and me-time. |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2591 |
Ed, as your lawyer, it's what's below the surface of this case that should concern you. |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2592 |
The boss said I could take a half day. |
1.1316 |
0.04329 |
76 |
67 |
8 |
1 |
2593 |
You wear pajama bottoms on Zoom, I wear a Speedo. |
1.1316 |
0.03903 |
76 |
66 |
10 |
0 |
2594 |
Unfortunately Tom, “Being at home in the water,” does not make your pool deductible as a home office. |
1.1316 |
0.05076 |
76 |
69 |
4 |
3 |
2595 |
It's my first day and I'm just supposed to get my feet wet. |
1.1316 |
0.04717 |
76 |
68 |
6 |
2 |
2596 |
The company's re-instated the typing pool. |
1.1316 |
0.05076 |
76 |
69 |
4 |
3 |
2597 |
So it’s work hard, THEN play hard? |
1.1316 |
0.05076 |
76 |
69 |
4 |
3 |
2598 |
You're underwater again this year, Mr. Frobish. |
1.1313 |
0.03702 |
99 |
87 |
11 |
1 |
2599 |
I'm on lifeguard duty in 10 minutes but first a Zoom with my other family. |
1.1313 |
0.04222 |
99 |
89 |
7 |
3 |
2600 |
Your mother was right. I did need some time away from the office. |
1.1313 |
0.03970 |
99 |
88 |
9 |
2 |
2601 |
I'm not swimming you're swimming" |
1.1313 |
0.03702 |
99 |
87 |
11 |
1 |
2602 |
Did you just say your business is underwater? |
1.1313 |
0.03970 |
99 |
88 |
9 |
2 |
2603 |
The American on their annual summer holiday. |
1.1313 |
0.03702 |
99 |
87 |
11 |
1 |
2604 |
No swimming for at least 30 minutes after a Zoom call. |
1.1313 |
0.03970 |
99 |
88 |
9 |
2 |
2605 |
I'm Michael Phelps' CPA. |
1.1310 |
0.03703 |
84 |
73 |
11 |
0 |
2606 |
Just pooling resources so I don't go under. |
1.1310 |
0.04072 |
84 |
74 |
9 |
1 |
2607 |
I'm working on my backslash |
1.1310 |
0.04724 |
84 |
76 |
5 |
3 |
2608 |
I was approved for remote-work vacation. |
1.1310 |
0.04072 |
84 |
74 |
9 |
1 |
2609 |
I’m Trumps latest lawyer, he said I could wash all my lies away in his pool. |
1.1310 |
0.04410 |
84 |
75 |
7 |
2 |
2610 |
Someday you'll understand how important my work is. |
1.1310 |
0.03703 |
84 |
73 |
11 |
0 |
2611 |
Yes, I'm working from home, why do you ask? |
1.1310 |
0.04724 |
84 |
76 |
5 |
3 |
2612 |
The coffee shop was full. |
1.1310 |
0.04410 |
84 |
75 |
7 |
2 |
2613 |
My new job has me one day in the office, three days at home and one day in the pool. |
1.1310 |
0.04072 |
84 |
74 |
9 |
1 |
2614 |
I can work anywhere, but I can't figure out how to take a day off. |
1.1310 |
0.04410 |
84 |
75 |
7 |
2 |
2615 |
The Wi-Fi signal is great right here. |
1.1310 |
0.03703 |
84 |
73 |
11 |
0 |
2616 |
So,, you only want swimming insurance with no liability?? |
1.1310 |
0.04072 |
84 |
74 |
9 |
1 |
2617 |
What do you mean I need a swimsuit? |
1.1310 |
0.04410 |
84 |
75 |
7 |
2 |
2618 |
Is this not the butterfly stroke you said would help with changing my work environment |
1.1310 |
0.04410 |
84 |
75 |
7 |
2 |
2619 |
We've been directed to pool resources. |
1.1310 |
0.04072 |
84 |
74 |
9 |
1 |
2620 |
Well, we have a liquidity problem. |
1.1310 |
0.04072 |
84 |
74 |
9 |
1 |
2621 |
I couldn’t get my out-of-office reply to work. |
1.1310 |
0.04072 |
84 |
74 |
9 |
1 |
2622 |
Typing pool, you idiot. |
1.1310 |
0.04072 |
84 |
74 |
9 |
1 |
2623 |
Are you enjoying your swim? Perhaps you’d like to take our survey? |
1.1310 |
0.04410 |
84 |
75 |
7 |
2 |
2624 |
I save a lot of time on bathroom breaks |
1.1310 |
0.04724 |
84 |
76 |
5 |
3 |
2625 |
I don't have a family. |
1.1310 |
0.04072 |
84 |
74 |
9 |
1 |
2626 |
I never have to go in to the office anymore! |
1.1310 |
0.04410 |
84 |
75 |
7 |
2 |
2627 |
Sir, Is there anything that you found unique or different about our water park that stood out for you? |
1.1310 |
0.04410 |
84 |
75 |
7 |
2 |
2628 |
The company is bringing me on slowly, apprently they threw the last guy in at the deep end and he didn’t last a day. |
1.1310 |
0.04410 |
84 |
75 |
7 |
2 |
2629 |
I get it! You like to your assets to be liquid. |
1.1310 |
0.04410 |
84 |
75 |
7 |
2 |
2630 |
What are you doing in the secretarial pool? |
1.1304 |
0.03606 |
115 |
102 |
11 |
2 |
2631 |
They let us work from anywhere now. |
1.1304 |
0.03530 |
92 |
80 |
12 |
0 |
2632 |
Boss is mad that "our loans are underwater," so I thought I'd show some initiative and try to find them |
1.1304 |
0.04431 |
92 |
83 |
6 |
3 |
2633 |
And that’s how I got into liquid assets. |
1.1304 |
0.03530 |
92 |
80 |
12 |
0 |
2634 |
Glad you asked, Polo. It's the latest tech iteration of an old
swimming pool game that disturbs no one. |
1.1304 |
0.04576 |
69 |
61 |
7 |
1 |
2635 |
Vacation? No, I’m working. |
1.1304 |
0.03854 |
92 |
81 |
10 |
1 |
2636 |
Yes, they think I'm working from home. No, I. don't have a good story if they want to Zoom. |
1.1304 |
0.05020 |
69 |
62 |
5 |
2 |
2637 |
I've located a good deal on a set of water wings |
1.1304 |
0.04152 |
92 |
82 |
8 |
2 |
2638 |
The office A/C went kaput. |
1.1304 |
0.03854 |
92 |
81 |
10 |
1 |
2639 |
The boss told me to get immersed in liquidity ASAP." |
1.1304 |
0.04693 |
92 |
84 |
4 |
4 |
2640 |
Do you mind not splashing so much? |
1.1304 |
0.03854 |
92 |
81 |
10 |
1 |
2641 |
My recruiter says they'll be throwing me into the deep end after orientation. |
1.1304 |
0.03854 |
92 |
81 |
10 |
1 |
2642 |
They put me in charge of the office pool. |
1.1304 |
0.03854 |
92 |
81 |
10 |
1 |
2643 |
Shall I write in freestyle? |
1.1304 |
0.04152 |
92 |
82 |
8 |
2 |
2644 |
So… Tell me why you feel qualified to be a lifeguard. |
1.1304 |
0.04431 |
92 |
83 |
6 |
3 |
2645 |
Still wearing my pajama bottoms |
1.1304 |
0.03530 |
92 |
80 |
12 |
0 |
2646 |
Today’s my day off. |
1.1304 |
0.04152 |
92 |
82 |
8 |
2 |
2647 |
My wife told me all I do is work, so I’m trying new things |
1.1304 |
0.04576 |
69 |
61 |
7 |
1 |
2648 |
I’m trying work/life integration. |
1.1304 |
0.03854 |
92 |
81 |
10 |
1 |
2649 |
As your fiduciary, I recommend the backstroke. |
1.1300 |
0.03933 |
100 |
89 |
9 |
2 |
2650 |
The situation is fluid. |
1.1300 |
0.03667 |
100 |
88 |
11 |
1 |
2651 |
I’m knee deep in emails and need to dive in, but I’ll circle back to you in ten. |
1.1300 |
0.04181 |
100 |
90 |
7 |
3 |
2652 |
There. Filtered the background and I’m on mute. The remote staff meeting can start as soon as I get that margarita in a coffee cup. |
1.1300 |
0.03933 |
100 |
89 |
9 |
2 |
2653 |
I'm on a working vacation. |
1.1299 |
0.03856 |
77 |
67 |
10 |
0 |
2654 |
I was going to ask you the same question. |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2655 |
My boss said to report to the typing pool. |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2656 |
If you're not gonna wear pants in a meeting, you gotta go big. |
1.1299 |
0.03856 |
77 |
67 |
10 |
0 |
2657 |
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. |
1.1299 |
0.05012 |
77 |
70 |
4 |
3 |
2658 |
Is now a good time to talk about flood insurance? |
1.1299 |
0.04659 |
77 |
69 |
6 |
2 |
2659 |
They think it's a funny zoom background. |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2660 |
I’m an Aquatics Consultant, so this is my work space. |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2661 |
I’m checking ChatGBT to find out how many yards in a lap |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2662 |
No,of course I don’t wear shoes in the swimming pool. |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2663 |
Today was my turn for the kids car pool
swim lessons. |
1.1299 |
0.04659 |
77 |
69 |
6 |
2 |
2664 |
Are you wrapping up? My meeting starts in 2 minutes and I need the suit. |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2665 |
This way I can work nonstop without taking bathroom breaks. |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2666 |
so the judge, as for my ex-wife request, defined I must spend quality time with my kids on "my" weekends |
1.1299 |
0.05012 |
77 |
70 |
4 |
3 |
2667 |
As your accountant, it is my duty to advise you that you are now considered to be in deep water”
Jeffrey Manly
Toronto,On |
1.1299 |
0.04659 |
77 |
69 |
6 |
2 |
2668 |
Multitasking sounds better in theory than in reality. |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2669 |
You know, Florida is the only state to offer a swim-up bar exam. |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2670 |
I’m trying out wetsuits. |
1.1299 |
0.03856 |
77 |
67 |
10 |
0 |
2671 |
Just keep swimming, I'm your lifeguard trading futures remotely. |
1.1299 |
0.04276 |
77 |
68 |
8 |
1 |
2672 |
Before Climate Change, this office looked different. |
1.1299 |
0.03856 |
77 |
67 |
10 |
0 |
2673 |
As you can see from these numbers, we’re doing swimmingly. |
1.1299 |
0.03856 |
77 |
67 |
10 |
0 |
2674 |
Emails can’t swim, Carl. |
1.1299 |
0.04659 |
77 |
69 |
6 |
2 |
2675 |
All they said was “You’re reassigned to the clerical pool and get to work immediately.” |
1.1296 |
0.03742 |
108 |
96 |
10 |
2 |
2676 |
Sorry, Certified Public Accountants don't get into the swim of things. |
1.1294 |
0.04361 |
85 |
76 |
7 |
2 |
2677 |
Headquarters believes it will make audits less stressful. |
1.1294 |
0.04671 |
85 |
77 |
5 |
3 |
2678 |
You picked a good time to dive into home ownership. |
1.1294 |
0.04027 |
85 |
75 |
9 |
1 |
2679 |
They'll never think to look for me here. |
1.1294 |
0.04027 |
85 |
75 |
9 |
1 |
2680 |
With ChatGPT, I can both save lives and guard lifesavings. |
1.1294 |
0.04361 |
85 |
76 |
7 |
2 |
2681 |
I am with the CIA. Hunter's laptop was at the bottom of this pool . He forgot it there while bathing nude with a hooker. Nothing to see there. |
1.1294 |
0.04361 |
85 |
76 |
7 |
2 |
2682 |
They say it’s ok that I ‘work from home’ as long as I wear a tie. |
1.1294 |
0.04671 |
85 |
77 |
5 |
3 |
2683 |
I'm testing a product that turns water pink when someone takes a whiz |
1.1294 |
0.04671 |
85 |
77 |
5 |
3 |
2684 |
For our travel website, could you describe the water? |
1.1294 |
0.04027 |
85 |
75 |
9 |
1 |
2685 |
When you mentioned your liquid assets, this isn't what I had in mind. |
1.1294 |
0.04361 |
85 |
76 |
7 |
2 |
2686 |
This wasn't what I had in mind when I suggested you liquify some of your assets. |
1.1294 |
0.04361 |
85 |
76 |
7 |
2 |
2687 |
I was promoted to the secretary pool. |
1.1294 |
0.04361 |
85 |
76 |
7 |
2 |
2688 |
We’re liquidating the company. |
1.1294 |
0.04027 |
85 |
75 |
9 |
1 |
2689 |
I work in the typing pool. |
1.1294 |
0.03662 |
85 |
74 |
11 |
0 |
2690 |
I'm part of a government study on why people swim in pools.
Wynnie Plocher, Beaverton, Oregon |
1.1294 |
0.04027 |
85 |
75 |
9 |
1 |
2691 |
I’ve decided to not make any waves |
1.1294 |
0.04361 |
85 |
76 |
7 |
2 |
2692 |
I’m taking a bath in this market. You? |
1.1294 |
0.04027 |
85 |
75 |
9 |
1 |
2693 |
Shhh…they think I’m working from home. |
1.1294 |
0.03662 |
85 |
74 |
11 |
0 |
2694 |
As you can see, we've had a lot of interest in the lifeguard position. |
1.1294 |
0.04361 |
85 |
76 |
7 |
2 |
2695 |
In this economy my business is treading water. |
1.1294 |
0.04027 |
85 |
75 |
9 |
1 |
2696 |
No, no, I’m still very much on vacation |
1.1294 |
0.04361 |
85 |
76 |
7 |
2 |
2697 |
My boss said I was going to swim with the big sharks, so I need all the practice I can get. |
1.1290 |
0.04385 |
93 |
84 |
6 |
3 |
2698 |
If the water seems warmer over here it's because of the laptop. I swear. |
1.1290 |
0.04385 |
93 |
84 |
6 |
3 |
2699 |
Management wants us to cut down on bathroom breaks, |
1.1290 |
0.03495 |
93 |
81 |
12 |
0 |
2700 |
I was told to get all the water logged. |
1.1290 |
0.04110 |
93 |
83 |
8 |
2 |
2701 |
I can't wait to go back to the office five days a week. |
1.1290 |
0.03815 |
93 |
82 |
10 |
1 |
2702 |
Could you take a minute to answer a few questions? |
1.1290 |
0.03815 |
93 |
82 |
10 |
1 |
2703 |
The best thing about being a grad student is the work/life balance. |
1.1290 |
0.04110 |
93 |
83 |
8 |
2 |
2704 |
I'm working on my next article about avoiding executive burnout. |
1.1290 |
0.03495 |
93 |
81 |
12 |
0 |
2705 |
Trying to get in shape for surfing the Internet. |
1.1290 |
0.03815 |
93 |
82 |
10 |
1 |
2706 |
I got comfortable with working remotely but couldn’t ditch the suit and tie. |
1.1290 |
0.03815 |
93 |
82 |
10 |
1 |
2707 |
I’m sorry, this pool is for accredited investors only.” |
1.1290 |
0.04385 |
93 |
84 |
6 |
3 |
2708 |
Competition is fierce in real estate these days, so I thought I'd try a new approach. Are you ready to take the plunge? |
1.1290 |
0.03495 |
93 |
81 |
12 |
0 |
2709 |
Sir, i ask that you please stop peeing in my office. |
1.1290 |
0.04385 |
93 |
84 |
6 |
3 |
2710 |
This way I don't have to stop working to relieve myself. |
1.1290 |
0.04110 |
93 |
83 |
8 |
2 |
2711 |
It's called "Splash". |
1.1290 |
0.04110 |
93 |
83 |
8 |
2 |
2712 |
I'm a health inspector who just sunk to a new low. |
1.1290 |
0.04644 |
93 |
85 |
4 |
4 |
2713 |
There's no Wi-Fi in the deep end. |
1.1290 |
0.04385 |
93 |
84 |
6 |
3 |
2714 |
I told my boss I was drowning in work so he told me to just keep my head above water. |
1.1290 |
0.04869 |
62 |
55 |
6 |
1 |
2715 |
I'm just kind of testing the limits of 'casual Fridays'. |
1.1290 |
0.03815 |
93 |
82 |
10 |
1 |
2716 |
I realized I'm not spending enough time with the children. |
1.1290 |
0.04385 |
93 |
84 |
6 |
3 |
2717 |
I took a deep dive into the matter and need to share my findings immediately. |
1.1287 |
0.03632 |
101 |
89 |
11 |
1 |
2718 |
I’’m a pool attorney. |
1.1287 |
0.03632 |
101 |
89 |
11 |
1 |
2719 |
My clients are getting harder and harder to meet in person |
1.1286 |
0.04030 |
70 |
61 |
9 |
0 |
2720 |
This survey will only take two minutes and will help management understand what swimmers like you really want. So, how often do you come here? |
1.1286 |
0.04514 |
70 |
62 |
7 |
1 |
2721 |
A treadmill desk hurts my knee. |
1.1286 |
0.04514 |
70 |
62 |
7 |
1 |
2722 |
I don't care how many "likes" we'll get. If one of them starts doing a dead man's float, I'm getting the hell out of here! |
1.1286 |
0.04952 |
70 |
63 |
5 |
2 |
2723 |
For God sake, Harris, how can you be so shallow? |
1.1286 |
0.04514 |
70 |
62 |
7 |
1 |
2724 |
And with that you are all set, thank you for choosing Splash & Tax Services |
1.1286 |
0.04514 |
70 |
62 |
7 |
1 |
2725 |
I actually *did* book this space at 9am |
1.1286 |
0.04952 |
70 |
63 |
5 |
2 |
2726 |
I feel casual Fridays have gotten out of hand. |
1.1282 |
0.04602 |
78 |
70 |
6 |
2 |
2727 |
I just feel naked without the old school tie. |
1.1282 |
0.04224 |
78 |
69 |
8 |
1 |
2728 |
At work, I’m just trying to keep my head above water. |
1.1282 |
0.04224 |
78 |
69 |
8 |
1 |
2729 |
I'm working remoat. |
1.1282 |
0.04224 |
78 |
69 |
8 |
1 |
2730 |
They said I should bring my suit? |
1.1282 |
0.04602 |
78 |
70 |
6 |
2 |
2731 |
…and unlimited Digital Access, Plus a FREE Tote! |
1.1282 |
0.04602 |
78 |
70 |
6 |
2 |
2732 |
There's no WiFi, but the bathroom is everywhere. |
1.1282 |
0.04602 |
78 |
70 |
6 |
2 |
2733 |
I've been treading water here for too long. I'm gonna dive in at the deep end. |
1.1282 |
0.03810 |
78 |
68 |
10 |
0 |
2734 |
My wife says I need to get better at multi-tasking. |
1.1282 |
0.04950 |
78 |
71 |
4 |
3 |
2735 |
I'm on Zoom so... |
1.1282 |
0.04224 |
78 |
69 |
8 |
1 |
2736 |
I know I agreed to go to the pool with you but I have a zoom meeting I have to take. |
1.1282 |
0.04224 |
78 |
69 |
8 |
1 |
2737 |
Boss said I needed to get my feet wet. |
1.1282 |
0.03810 |
78 |
68 |
10 |
0 |
2738 |
Membership is a fixed cost. By maximizing my frequency of pool use, the cost per visit is reduced. |
1.1282 |
0.04224 |
78 |
69 |
8 |
1 |
2739 |
Take a number and we’ll be with you in a jiffy! |
1.1282 |
0.05276 |
78 |
72 |
2 |
4 |
2740 |
I heard this was a good place to get some laps, so I brought my laptop. |
1.1282 |
0.04602 |
78 |
70 |
6 |
2 |
2741 |
I’m sorry son, but this was the only way we could be together on Father’s Day this year. |
1.1282 |
0.04224 |
78 |
69 |
8 |
1 |
2742 |
I get unlimited PTO and unlimited work |
1.1282 |
0.04602 |
78 |
70 |
6 |
2 |
2743 |
When I said "drowning in debt" I thought you would know better |
1.1282 |
0.04602 |
78 |
70 |
6 |
2 |
2744 |
What do you mean ? It‘s Monday, this is my lane! |
1.1282 |
0.03810 |
78 |
68 |
10 |
0 |
2745 |
It's okay. I set my Zoom background to "Sunny Beach Retreat" and told them I'm playing "Poolside ASMR." |
1.1282 |
0.04224 |
78 |
69 |
8 |
1 |
2746 |
It’s a workcation. |
1.1279 |
0.03982 |
86 |
76 |
9 |
1 |
2747 |
Don't worry, by background is blurred. |
1.1279 |
0.04619 |
86 |
78 |
5 |
3 |
2748 |
For the record, what’s your take on the flooded pool at Mar-a-Lago? |
1.1279 |
0.04312 |
86 |
77 |
7 |
2 |
2749 |
No |