Rank |
Caption |
Mean |
Precision |
Total votes |
"Unfunny" votes |
"Somewhat funny" votes |
"Funny" votes |
0 |
You can leave your label on. |
1.7878 |
0.01166 |
4547 |
1991 |
1530 |
1026 |
1 |
First the good news...you've aged well. |
1.7799 |
0.01638 |
2340 |
1048 |
759 |
533 |
2 |
The good news is, you've aged well . . . . |
1.7783 |
0.01990 |
1502 |
650 |
535 |
317 |
3 |
It's standard procedure at your age |
1.7755 |
0.01943 |
1577 |
686 |
559 |
332 |
4 |
It's a routine procedure, but I would recommend someone drive me home afterwards. |
1.7584 |
0.01956 |
1668 |
782 |
507 |
379 |
5 |
It's like acupuncture, but... with a twist. |
1.7517 |
0.01898 |
1780 |
846 |
530 |
404 |
6 |
Good news. I found a way to stop your aging. |
1.7448 |
0.01244 |
4193 |
2032 |
1199 |
962 |
7 |
I’m afraid you need glasses. |
1.7370 |
0.01504 |
2913 |
1443 |
793 |
677 |
8 |
You must be my 5 o'clock |
1.7271 |
0.01485 |
2807 |
1356 |
861 |
590 |
9 |
Oh, this? Just a little something to help you breathe. |
1.7230 |
0.02115 |
1267 |
583 |
452 |
232 |
10 |
You won't be able to drive after this, and neither will I. |
1.6988 |
0.01303 |
3543 |
1760 |
1090 |
693 |
11 |
Relax, I've performed this procedure thousands of times." |
1.6978 |
0.01825 |
1701 |
816 |
583 |
302 |
12 |
I’m detecting subtle notes of fear and distrust. |
1.6917 |
0.01459 |
2686 |
1309 |
896 |
481 |
13 |
The good news is that you were born in a very good year. |
1.6901 |
0.01910 |
1536 |
742 |
528 |
266 |
14 |
Don't worry! I've done hundreds of these procedures. |
1.6834 |
0.02070 |
1311 |
641 |
444 |
226 |
15 |
Relax. It's just something to help you breathe. |
1.6826 |
0.01814 |
1657 |
798 |
587 |
272 |
16 |
It’s a minor procedure, and afterwards we’ll both feel much better. |
1.6741 |
0.01868 |
1623 |
810 |
532 |
281 |
17 |
Actually, you ARE the anesthesia. |
1.6728 |
0.01938 |
1519 |
763 |
490 |
266 |
18 |
It IS a slightly invasive procedure, but we can do it right here in the office. |
1.6720 |
0.01993 |
1378 |
677 |
476 |
225 |
19 |
I have something that can help you breathe |
1.6645 |
0.01943 |
1401 |
684 |
503 |
214 |
20 |
Keeping things bottled up is dangerous. |
1.6614 |
0.01977 |
1391 |
693 |
476 |
222 |
21 |
You are going to feel just a little prick before we start. |
1.6447 |
0.02056 |
1272 |
648 |
428 |
196 |
22 |
Once I leave the room you can pour it into this cup. |
1.6418 |
0.02031 |
1421 |
762 |
406 |
253 |
23 |
I'm happy to report you're full-bodied with an excellent nose. |
1.6416 |
0.01952 |
1395 |
710 |
475 |
210 |
24 |
I recommend we run some routine tests -- tannins, structure, undertones of blackberry, that sort of thing. |
1.6385 |
0.01980 |
1397 |
726 |
450 |
221 |
25 |
We’ve got to get to the bottom of this. |
1.6374 |
0.02222 |
1092 |
564 |
360 |
168 |
26 |
You'll feel a slight prick, but then you can breathe. |
1.6370 |
0.01860 |
1540 |
791 |
517 |
232 |
27 |
I've called a close female colleague of mine over for a second opinion. |
1.6368 |
0.02095 |
1319 |
708 |
382 |
229 |
28 |
Yes, I do have something that will help you breathe. |
1.6364 |
0.01872 |
1441 |
721 |
523 |
197 |
29 |
I think I see what's stopping you up... |
1.6306 |
0.01958 |
1413 |
740 |
455 |
218 |
30 |
Now open wide and I'll say 'ahh.' |
1.6240 |
0.01916 |
1585 |
871 |
439 |
275 |
31 |
Trust me, you’ll breathe more freely after this. |
1.6211 |
0.01913 |
1391 |
717 |
484 |
190 |
32 |
But I'm a screw-top, Doctor. Did you even examine me? |
1.6210 |
0.02007 |
1451 |
803 |
395 |
253 |
33 |
Here we are…just a little something to help you breathe. |
1.6157 |
0.01853 |
1465 |
758 |
512 |
195 |
34 |
This shouldn't hurt but you may feel a bit empty when we're finished. |
1.6152 |
0.01944 |
1359 |
711 |
460 |
188 |
35 |
We'll both be feeling better in no time. |
1.6149 |
0.01808 |
1701 |
926 |
504 |
271 |
36 |
Relax, it'll help you breathe. |
1.6143 |
0.01923 |
1356 |
702 |
475 |
179 |
37 |
I’ve found a way to relieve some of that pressure. |
1.6139 |
0.02390 |
904 |
475 |
303 |
126 |
38 |
You'll feel much more relaxed once we let you breathe. |
1.6113 |
0.01887 |
1428 |
748 |
487 |
193 |
39 |
Close your eyes and think of France. |
1.6103 |
0.02019 |
1383 |
764 |
394 |
225 |
40 |
Really, it’s a routine procedure. After a twist and a pop, we’ll let you breathe. |
1.6081 |
0.01929 |
1378 |
729 |
460 |
189 |
41 |
I just think that some fresh air would do you good. |
1.6078 |
0.02025 |
1229 |
645 |
421 |
163 |
42 |
It's just a quick jab and twist and you'll find it so much easier to breathe. |
1.6056 |
0.01983 |
1311 |
698 |
432 |
181 |
43 |
Don't look so concerned Mr. Vino. Eventually we all get screwed. |
1.6021 |
0.02169 |
1234 |
701 |
323 |
210 |
44 |
It's just a little check that we have to do when you're over fifty. |
1.6007 |
0.02526 |
854 |
471 |
253 |
130 |
45 |
Hello, you must be my five o' clock. |
1.5986 |
0.02031 |
1435 |
828 |
355 |
252 |
46 |
This may look nasty, but it'll help you breathe. |
1.5971 |
0.02070 |
1164 |
619 |
395 |
150 |
47 |
I have something which will help you breathe |
1.5932 |
0.02165 |
1057 |
564 |
359 |
134 |
48 |
The upside is, you'll be able to breathe. |
1.5876 |
0.02499 |
793 |
427 |
266 |
100 |
49 |
Welcome to Doctors Without Bordeauxes. |
1.5866 |
0.02235 |
1253 |
758 |
255 |
240 |
50 |
The good news is that you've aged well. |
1.5797 |
0.02167 |
1135 |
641 |
330 |
164 |
51 |
I’m confident I can get to the bottom of this. |
1.5794 |
0.02183 |
1158 |
665 |
315 |
178 |
52 |
You'll feel a little pop and then I just need you to breathe! |
1.5742 |
0.02298 |
1085 |
640 |
267 |
178 |
53 |
With all that wine in you, you’re not going to feel a thing |
1.5719 |
0.02467 |
841 |
472 |
257 |
112 |
54 |
I'll have the nurse bring in a little cup. |
1.5719 |
0.02323 |
1002 |
577 |
277 |
148 |
55 |
On second thought, don't lie down. |
1.5645 |
0.02613 |
969 |
623 |
145 |
201 |
56 |
The good news is that you've aged very well. |
1.5629 |
0.02333 |
954 |
547 |
277 |
130 |
57 |
The good news is you've aged very well. |
1.5597 |
0.02395 |
922 |
536 |
256 |
130 |
58 |
Trust me. I'll have it out before dinner time. |
1.5531 |
0.03491 |
414 |
238 |
123 |
53 |
59 |
There is a way to stop the aging process. |
1.5491 |
0.02500 |
814 |
473 |
235 |
106 |
60 |
After the procedure, we’ll both need someone to drive us home. |
1.5482 |
0.02658 |
768 |
460 |
195 |
113 |
61 |
Don’t worry, you’ll only get better with age. |
1.5474 |
0.02702 |
643 |
362 |
210 |
71 |
62 |
It’s a simple same day surgery and you should find that you can breathe much better afterward. |
1.5435 |
0.02775 |
609 |
345 |
197 |
67 |
63 |
Generally it's recommended once you reach a certain age. |
1.5364 |
0.02805 |
660 |
395 |
176 |
89 |
64 |
I have a little something to relieve the pressure. |
1.5350 |
0.02888 |
742 |
482 |
123 |
137 |
65 |
I’ll need to take a sample. |
1.5340 |
0.02818 |
661 |
399 |
171 |
91 |
66 |
This is really a simple procedure, but afterward you'll need a pair of glasses. |
1.5323 |
0.03132 |
603 |
385 |
115 |
103 |
67 |
I have just the thing to stop the aging process. |
1.5318 |
0.02897 |
645 |
396 |
155 |
94 |
68 |
I'd be happy to remove it. |
1.5303 |
0.02680 |
660 |
384 |
202 |
74 |
69 |
Trust me, I have just the thing to help you breathe. |
1.5271 |
0.02920 |
516 |
293 |
174 |
49 |
70 |
Oh, we can stop the aging process right away. |
1.5253 |
0.03024 |
594 |
369 |
138 |
87 |
71 |
Don't worry. I will personally get to the bottom of this. |
1.5206 |
0.02790 |
582 |
338 |
185 |
59 |
72 |
Good news! You’re at 98.6. |
1.5204 |
0.02902 |
563 |
333 |
167 |
63 |
73 |
You may experience mild discomfort. |
1.5194 |
0.02947 |
516 |
299 |
166 |
51 |
74 |
I understand you donated your body to science. |
1.5166 |
0.03286 |
453 |
273 |
126 |
54 |
75 |
The bad news is that your caption will be buried in the crowdsource voting by the Caption Contest Facebook Group, which votes as a block for its member's captions, so that other funnier captions are never seen by most voters. |
1.5146 |
0.03577 |
515 |
355 |
55 |
105 |
76 |
If you were a screw top, it would be an out patient treatment. |
1.5119 |
0.03087 |
547 |
341 |
132 |
74 |
77 |
Don't worry - I do this procedure every evening. |
1.5118 |
0.02969 |
549 |
332 |
153 |
64 |
78 |
I'm going to need a sample. |
1.5092 |
0.02928 |
542 |
324 |
160 |
58 |
79 |
I'm sure we can fix this pressure you feel inside. |
1.5091 |
0.03006 |
493 |
290 |
155 |
48 |
80 |
You ARE the anesthesia. |
1.5088 |
0.03033 |
511 |
307 |
148 |
56 |
81 |
It's going to have to come out eventually... |
1.5088 |
0.03111 |
513 |
315 |
135 |
63 |
82 |
You have aged very well. |
1.5073 |
0.02894 |
548 |
327 |
164 |
57 |
83 |
And it's guaranteed to stop the aging process! |
1.5073 |
0.03040 |
548 |
340 |
138 |
70 |
84 |
My bill isn't the only way you're going to get screwed here. |
1.5071 |
0.03228 |
491 |
306 |
121 |
64 |
85 |
Just lean over.....this won't hurt a bit |
1.5061 |
0.03101 |
490 |
296 |
140 |
54 |
86 |
Would you mind removing your label? |
1.5054 |
0.03161 |
463 |
278 |
136 |
49 |
87 |
It's just to help you breathe. |
1.5047 |
0.03017 |
529 |
323 |
145 |
61 |
88 |
I've got something that will make us both feel better. |
1.5020 |
0.03097 |
488 |
296 |
139 |
53 |
89 |
It's a standard test we do when you reach a certain age. |
1.5000 |
0.03265 |
468 |
292 |
118 |
58 |
90 |
Sir, you are the anesthesia. |
1.4990 |
0.03180 |
501 |
315 |
122 |
64 |
91 |
My wife and I would love to have you for dinner tonight. |
1.4989 |
0.03221 |
457 |
280 |
126 |
51 |
92 |
Trust me, I’ll have you breathing in no time. |
1.4980 |
0.03070 |
488 |
296 |
141 |
51 |
93 |
Don't worry. It's a simple procedure that we recommend for anyone of your vintage. |
1.4969 |
0.03228 |
491 |
311 |
116 |
64 |
94 |
How's this for openers? |
1.4966 |
0.03260 |
441 |
270 |
123 |
48 |
95 |
Trust me ... my staff and I will definitely get to the bottom of this!" |
1.4938 |
0.03264 |
484 |
309 |
111 |
64 |
96 |
Let's get to the bottom of this, shall we? |
1.4935 |
0.03156 |
464 |
284 |
131 |
49 |
97 |
One of us will soon feel much better. |
1.4933 |
0.03243 |
450 |
278 |
122 |
50 |
98 |
After the procedure, I want you to focus on breathing, |
1.4933 |
0.03295 |
446 |
278 |
116 |
52 |
99 |
You may feel drained after the procedure. |
1.4932 |
0.03165 |
444 |
268 |
133 |
43 |
100 |
Don’t think of it as the end; think of it as a grand opening! |
1.4914 |
0.03459 |
407 |
255 |
104 |
48 |
101 |
You won't feel a thing. Then I won't feel a thing. |
1.4875 |
0.03307 |
441 |
277 |
113 |
51 |
102 |
You'll be my final patient of the day. |
1.4870 |
0.03173 |
423 |
254 |
132 |
37 |
103 |
Relax! I’ve done this procedure hundreds of times! |
1.4848 |
0.03249 |
460 |
291 |
115 |
54 |
104 |
It's a standard procedure, usually performed around 5 o'clock. |
1.4846 |
0.03305 |
421 |
261 |
116 |
44 |
105 |
Don't worry, it's just something to help you breathe. |
1.4845 |
0.03216 |
452 |
282 |
121 |
49 |
106 |
Sometimes the old therapies are still the best |
1.4844 |
0.03498 |
384 |
240 |
102 |
42 |
107 |
It's nothing serious. You just need some over decanter medication. |
1.4835 |
0.03880 |
364 |
242 |
68 |
54 |
108 |
I’ll need my other glasses for this. |
1.4822 |
0.03373 |
421 |
266 |
107 |
48 |
109 |
I've done this procedure a thousand times." |
1.4812 |
0.03102 |
478 |
298 |
130 |
50 |
110 |
The good news is you’ll breathe easier! |
1.4805 |
0.03161 |
435 |
266 |
129 |
40 |
111 |
This will allow you to release everything that has been fermenting inside you for years. |
1.4804 |
0.03910 |
358 |
239 |
66 |
53 |
112 |
I'll have you breathing in no time. |
1.4799 |
0.03063 |
448 |
271 |
139 |
38 |
113 |
You might feel a little pop |
1.4799 |
0.03369 |
398 |
247 |
111 |
40 |
114 |
I promise, we'll both feel much better shortly. |
1.4783 |
0.03048 |
437 |
262 |
141 |
34 |
115 |
You'll be breathing better in no time. |
1.4775 |
0.03223 |
400 |
242 |
125 |
33 |
116 |
I have something that will help you breathe better. |
1.4749 |
0.03479 |
398 |
255 |
97 |
46 |
117 |
It's time for your annual corknoscopy. |
1.4747 |
0.03892 |
316 |
202 |
78 |
36 |
118 |
Just the tip |
1.4747 |
0.03944 |
316 |
204 |
74 |
38 |
119 |
Trust me. I've done this thousands of times. |
1.4740 |
0.03687 |
346 |
220 |
88 |
38 |
120 |
Once I remove that blockage we’ll both feel better. |
1.4731 |
0.03338 |
446 |
290 |
101 |
55 |
121 |
Cheer up! You're my only patient who gets better with age. |
1.4723 |
0.03569 |
379 |
244 |
91 |
44 |
122 |
Relax, I'll get to the bottom of this. |
1.4723 |
0.03449 |
379 |
238 |
103 |
38 |
123 |
Don't worry, we just need a small sample for tasting... I mean testing. |
1.4718 |
0.03423 |
426 |
278 |
95 |
53 |
124 |
I'll be feeling better shortly. |
1.4711 |
0.03731 |
346 |
223 |
83 |
40 |
125 |
The good news is your body’s in great shape. The bad news is it’s my anniversary. |
1.4698 |
0.03838 |
364 |
245 |
67 |
52 |
126 |
I recommend a frontal unbottleme. |
1.4688 |
0.04029 |
320 |
213 |
64 |
43 |
127 |
I’m afraid it will have to be removed. |
1.4683 |
0.03394 |
378 |
236 |
107 |
35 |
128 |
You may feel drained afterward. That's normal. |
1.4680 |
0.03632 |
344 |
218 |
91 |
35 |
129 |
Just to help you breathe." |
1.4674 |
0.03362 |
383 |
239 |
109 |
35 |
130 |
It'll be over soon and then you can breathe |
1.4668 |
0.03331 |
407 |
258 |
108 |
41 |
131 |
I've got just the thing to help you breathe |
1.4665 |
0.03570 |
373 |
241 |
90 |
42 |
132 |
Don't worry. I 've done this procedure a thousand times. |
1.4655 |
0.03624 |
348 |
222 |
90 |
36 |
133 |
One of us will feel better after this |
1.4652 |
0.03608 |
359 |
231 |
89 |
39 |
134 |
Believe me, it will help you breathe! |
1.4638 |
0.03446 |
373 |
236 |
101 |
36 |
135 |
This is a normal procedure for a patient your age |
1.4628 |
0.03557 |
363 |
233 |
92 |
38 |
136 |
You were right to be concerned about your age. |
1.4618 |
0.03494 |
353 |
222 |
99 |
32 |
137 |
Either way, you're screwed! |
1.4615 |
0.03771 |
338 |
221 |
78 |
39 |
138 |
Actually, there are benefits to aging. |
1.4613 |
0.03349 |
388 |
245 |
107 |
36 |
139 |
I have something that will help you breathe! |
1.4611 |
0.03487 |
373 |
239 |
96 |
38 |
140 |
When you wake up, I'll be asleep. |
1.4604 |
0.03758 |
328 |
212 |
81 |
35 |
141 |
I'm here to serve you. |
1.4601 |
0.03750 |
326 |
210 |
82 |
34 |
142 |
You'll just hear a little "pop" |
1.4590 |
0.03597 |
366 |
239 |
86 |
41 |
143 |
Do I look like someone who would screw you? |
1.4571 |
0.03784 |
350 |
234 |
72 |
44 |
144 |
I promise this will help you breathe. |
1.4567 |
0.03526 |
335 |
210 |
97 |
28 |
145 |
At your vintage this is a mandatory procedure |
1.4548 |
0.03814 |
354 |
240 |
67 |
47 |
146 |
Just a simple procedure to drain some fluid and we'll all feel better. |
1.4540 |
0.03593 |
326 |
206 |
92 |
28 |
147 |
I've arranged for a second opinion... and cheese. |
1.4511 |
0.03978 |
317 |
214 |
63 |
40 |
148 |
Don't worry, I'm going to get to the bottom of this. |
1.4508 |
0.03735 |
315 |
203 |
82 |
30 |
149 |
You'll just feel a little squeeze and a pinch, then the pressure should start to subside. |
1.4490 |
0.03824 |
314 |
206 |
75 |
33 |
150 |
First, we'll have you pee in a glass.” |
1.4489 |
0.03946 |
323 |
219 |
63 |
41 |
151 |
You'll have to wait 50 more years for your appointment |
1.4482 |
0.03848 |
299 |
194 |
76 |
29 |
152 |
You’re holding up very well for a mediocre vintage. |
1.4470 |
0.03582 |
302 |
188 |
93 |
21 |
153 |
You’ll breathe much better after the procedure. |
1.4462 |
0.03697 |
316 |
204 |
83 |
29 |
154 |
It's a normal procedure for a wine of your age. |
1.4448 |
0.03765 |
308 |
200 |
79 |
29 |
155 |
Not a real Bordeaux? Well, I'm not a real doctor! |
1.4435 |
0.03685 |
345 |
230 |
77 |
38 |
156 |
It’s a simple procedure. First you’ll feel a slight pinch, next a gentle tugging sensation, after which you can relax and breathe freely! |
1.4431 |
0.03802 |
325 |
217 |
72 |
36 |
157 |
You’ll be fine, but I’ll feel fantastic. |
1.4419 |
0.03798 |
301 |
196 |
77 |
28 |
158 |
The good news is that I'll feel better after you have this procedure. |
1.4403 |
0.03961 |
293 |
195 |
67 |
31 |
159 |
Don't worry, I'll get to the bottom of it. |
1.4397 |
0.03915 |
282 |
184 |
72 |
26 |
160 |
I’ve performed this procedure countless times. |
1.4393 |
0.03666 |
280 |
175 |
87 |
18 |
161 |
Sorry, but your sulfites came back high. |
1.4392 |
0.03752 |
296 |
191 |
80 |
25 |
162 |
It's time we remove that obstruction. |
1.4388 |
0.03769 |
294 |
190 |
79 |
25 |
163 |
You’ll feel a little sting, then a sense of being screwed |
1.4385 |
0.04077 |
301 |
207 |
56 |
38 |
164 |
Once it comes out, you'll be able to breathe. |
1.4384 |
0.03880 |
292 |
192 |
72 |
28 |
165 |
You'll feel no pain and shortly after nor will I. |
1.4383 |
0.03900 |
308 |
207 |
67 |
34 |
166 |
I'm afraid it's going to have to come out. |
1.4382 |
0.04241 |
267 |
181 |
55 |
31 |
167 |
Good news, the corkage fee is in-network! |
1.4373 |
0.03944 |
279 |
183 |
70 |
26 |
168 |
Really, you would be amazed by how often I perform this procedure. |
1.4369 |
0.03748 |
325 |
217 |
74 |
34 |
169 |
There's a small corkage fee, but your insurance should cover it" |
1.4364 |
0.04116 |
275 |
185 |
60 |
30 |
170 |
It's a routine procedure for those of your vintage. |
1.4356 |
0.03689 |
303 |
196 |
82 |
25 |
171 |
Relax. I've done this hundreds of times. You'll just feel a little drained. |
1.4355 |
0.03798 |
310 |
206 |
73 |
31 |
172 |
So, Fred, the next part of your annual exam could leave you feeling a bit drained. |
1.4354 |
0.03705 |
294 |
189 |
82 |
23 |
173 |
There is one procedure I always recommend at your age. |
1.4345 |
0.03689 |
313 |
205 |
80 |
28 |
174 |
I have something to relieve the pressure. |
1.4342 |
0.03679 |
304 |
197 |
82 |
25 |
175 |
You might feel a slight pop, but don't worry, I've done this a thousand times. |
1.4342 |
0.03824 |
281 |
182 |
76 |
23 |
176 |
Shortly after the procedure you’ll be the life of the party. |
1.4334 |
0.04044 |
293 |
200 |
59 |
34 |
177 |
I see you've anesthetized yourself. |
1.4328 |
0.04007 |
305 |
210 |
58 |
37 |
178 |
I've got just the thing to relieve that blockage. |
1.4310 |
0.04288 |
239 |
159 |
57 |
23 |
179 |
We're going to need a rather large sample, I'm afraid. |
1.4301 |
0.04178 |
272 |
186 |
55 |
31 |
180 |
I've got something that will help you breathe. |
1.4301 |
0.04046 |
272 |
182 |
63 |
27 |
181 |
Don’t worry. This is routine procedure for a bottle your age. |
1.4296 |
0.03853 |
291 |
193 |
71 |
27 |
182 |
Given your age, there is a procedure that we like to perform. |
1.4296 |
0.03914 |
291 |
195 |
67 |
29 |
183 |
The corkage fee should be covered by your insurer. |
1.4292 |
0.04509 |
226 |
153 |
49 |
24 |
184 |
I'm here to help you breathe. |
1.4292 |
0.04238 |
233 |
153 |
60 |
20 |
185 |
Luckily, I can remove it. |
1.4291 |
0.04133 |
261 |
175 |
60 |
26 |
186 |
I have just the thing to relieve the pressure you've been under. |
1.4291 |
0.03836 |
296 |
197 |
71 |
28 |
187 |
It’s just a pinch. Then a pop. Then a glub glub glub. |
1.4286 |
0.03891 |
287 |
191 |
69 |
27 |
188 |
Let’s get you to open up |
1.4280 |
0.04031 |
257 |
169 |
66 |
22 |
189 |
You're the perfect age for this procedure. |
1.4265 |
0.03904 |
279 |
185 |
69 |
25 |
190 |
"Your procedure is scheduled for 5 o'clock somewhere. |
1.4263 |
0.04213 |
251 |
169 |
57 |
25 |
191 |
You will feel a little prick and then a slight tug. |
1.4257 |
0.04121 |
249 |
165 |
62 |
22 |
192 |
You have options, but you'll be screwed either way. |
1.4251 |
0.04262 |
247 |
167 |
55 |
25 |
193 |
Think of the next procedure as a breathing exercise. |
1.4248 |
0.03932 |
266 |
175 |
69 |
22 |
194 |
It’s nothing. Everyone from Bordeaux gets this procedure at your age. |
1.4246 |
0.04274 |
252 |
172 |
53 |
27 |
195 |
I’d like to check out your tannins. |
1.4246 |
0.03747 |
285 |
186 |
77 |
22 |
196 |
Well, the good news is that you don’t have to bend over. |
1.4240 |
0.04108 |
250 |
166 |
62 |
22 |
197 |
This will only hurt for a second and then you will be able to breathe. |
1.4235 |
0.03928 |
307 |
212 |
60 |
35 |
198 |
After you're opened, I will say ahhh. |
1.4234 |
0.03953 |
274 |
183 |
66 |
25 |
199 |
It’s a recommended procedure at your age. |
1.4232 |
0.03885 |
267 |
175 |
71 |
21 |
200 |
I'll just need a few samples. |
1.4226 |
0.04153 |
265 |
181 |
56 |
28 |
201 |
I’ve got a little something here that will help you breathe. |
1.4217 |
0.04359 |
230 |
155 |
53 |
22 |
202 |
I’m glad to see you’re aging well |
1.4205 |
0.03913 |
264 |
174 |
69 |
21 |
203 |
You'll notice a remarkable improvement in breathing. |
1.4190 |
0.03685 |
284 |
185 |
79 |
20 |
204 |
When people say 'screw it,' they're talking about me. |
1.4187 |
0.04231 |
246 |
167 |
55 |
24 |
205 |
You may feel a bit of pressure...and hear a pop. |
1.4186 |
0.04197 |
258 |
177 |
54 |
27 |
206 |
I think it's time you opened up. |
1.4184 |
0.04519 |
239 |
168 |
42 |
29 |
207 |
Good news. I know what's causing the blockage. |
1.4176 |
0.04093 |
273 |
188 |
56 |
29 |
208 |
You'd be amazed at the things people swallow! |
1.4163 |
0.04390 |
221 |
149 |
52 |
20 |
209 |
Don’t worry, this is a standard procedure for a bottle of your vintage. |
1.4156 |
0.04341 |
231 |
157 |
52 |
22 |
210 |
Proctological examinations are an important part of health care. |
1.4147 |
0.04494 |
217 |
148 |
48 |
21 |
211 |
You’ll feel much better after you breathe. |
1.4146 |
0.03786 |
287 |
192 |
71 |
24 |
212 |
You will be breathing better in just a few minutes. |
1.4141 |
0.03877 |
256 |
168 |
70 |
18 |
213 |
There's no copay - but there is a corkage fee. |
1.4139 |
0.04331 |
244 |
169 |
49 |
26 |
214 |
My advice is go home and rest for the next ten or eleven years. |
1.4130 |
0.04174 |
230 |
153 |
59 |
18 |
215 |
It's a simple procedure and afterwards you will be joining me for dinner. |
1.4129 |
0.04087 |
264 |
181 |
57 |
26 |
216 |
You're going to hear a slight "pop." |
1.4128 |
0.04708 |
218 |
154 |
38 |
26 |
217 |
Now that you are 50, this is important. |
1.4128 |
0.04451 |
235 |
164 |
45 |
26 |
218 |
I’m pleased to report that you’re delightfully full-bodied, bold, complex, and aged to perfection. In fact, let’s celebrate! |
1.4127 |
0.05992 |
126 |
87 |
26 |
13 |
219 |
The good news is that the blockage can be removed. |
1.4105 |
0.04319 |
229 |
156 |
52 |
21 |
220 |
This isn't going to hurt but you'll experience a sudden release of pressure. |
1.4104 |
0.03885 |
251 |
165 |
69 |
17 |
221 |
Not to worry, the corkage fee is covered. |
1.4104 |
0.03844 |
251 |
164 |
71 |
16 |
222 |
You'll feel a slight pinch at first, then neither one of us will feel a thing. |
1.4100 |
0.03974 |
239 |
157 |
66 |
16 |
223 |
Good news! Your insurance will cover the corkage fee. |
1.4097 |
0.04163 |
227 |
151 |
59 |
17 |
224 |
I am afraid that is going to have to come out. |
1.4096 |
0.04029 |
249 |
167 |
62 |
20 |
225 |
Trust me, 90 minutes after the 'breathing' procedure, you'll be perfect! |
1.4094 |
0.04050 |
254 |
172 |
60 |
22 |
226 |
This could hurt a lot, but in a little while, I won’t feel a thing. |
1.4094 |
0.04347 |
254 |
180 |
44 |
30 |
227 |
Don't worry, this procedure is common as you age. |
1.4093 |
0.04069 |
259 |
177 |
58 |
24 |
228 |
You might hear a quick 'pop'. |
1.4082 |
0.03980 |
267 |
182 |
61 |
24 |
229 |
The good news is that you are invited to the office party. |
1.4082 |
0.04073 |
245 |
165 |
60 |
20 |
230 |
Just relax. You need to breathe. |
1.4081 |
0.04116 |
223 |
147 |
61 |
15 |
231 |
Now, you may feel a bit drained afterward… |
1.4077 |
0.04220 |
233 |
158 |
55 |
20 |
232 |
You might feel a slight pop… |
1.4069 |
0.04245 |
231 |
157 |
54 |
20 |
233 |
We're going to need to draw some fluid for tasting - TESTING - I meant testing. |
1.4066 |
0.04324 |
241 |
168 |
48 |
25 |
234 |
Relax, this is nothing compared to what I do to champagne bottles. |
1.4062 |
0.04385 |
224 |
154 |
49 |
21 |
235 |
I'd like to keep you here overnight for, uh, observation. |
1.4062 |
0.04198 |
224 |
150 |
57 |
17 |
236 |
The procedure is pretty simple. We can help you breathe right here in the office. |
1.4061 |
0.04007 |
261 |
178 |
60 |
23 |
237 |
Just a little procedure to help you breathe. |
1.4059 |
0.04100 |
239 |
161 |
59 |
19 |
238 |
Don't worry, I have a simple procedure that will enable you to breathe and express all of the nuances of your personality that have been bottled up for so long. |
1.4057 |
0.04245 |
244 |
169 |
51 |
24 |
239 |
Lab tests say you're at 750 liters, but I think we can get that down a bit. |
1.4053 |
0.04251 |
227 |
154 |
54 |
19 |
240 |
I have a little something that will help you breathe.” |
1.4051 |
0.04167 |
237 |
161 |
56 |
20 |
241 |
Just a little procedure that will make me feel better. |
1.4049 |
0.04284 |
247 |
173 |
48 |
26 |
242 |
I've got good news! There's a straight-forward and low-risk procedure we can perform to address your bottled up feelings. |
1.4041 |
0.04110 |
245 |
167 |
57 |
21 |
243 |
This will be a full-bodied exam. |
1.4028 |
0.04450 |
216 |
149 |
47 |
20 |
244 |
At your age, it’s inevitable. |
1.4022 |
0.04632 |
184 |
124 |
46 |
14 |
245 |
Ok the good news is, we know how to get it out… |
1.4010 |
0.04341 |
202 |
135 |
53 |
14 |
246 |
Why don't we try a quick breathing exercise. |
1.4000 |
0.04167 |
240 |
165 |
54 |
21 |
247 |
Everyone in your family goes through this at your age. |
1.4000 |
0.04293 |
220 |
150 |
52 |
18 |
248 |
Are you ready for your corkonoscopy? |
1.4000 |
0.04687 |
210 |
149 |
38 |
23 |
249 |
Don’t worry. This will help you breathe. |
1.4000 |
0.03964 |
235 |
156 |
64 |
15 |
250 |
Once it's over, you'll be able to breathe. |
1.4000 |
0.04514 |
205 |
141 |
46 |
18 |
251 |
Removing the blockage will be best for everyone, I can assure you. |
1.3992 |
0.04106 |
238 |
162 |
57 |
19 |
252 |
I think we may have a way to get to the bottom of this! |
1.3983 |
0.04237 |
231 |
159 |
52 |
20 |
253 |
Everyone your age needs this procedure eventually! |
1.3982 |
0.04438 |
226 |
159 |
44 |
23 |
254 |
At your age there's one more test I'd like to run. |
1.3982 |
0.04164 |
226 |
153 |
56 |
17 |
255 |
Don't worry, it's a simple procedure that will allow you to breathe. Trust me, I've performed this thousands of times. |
1.3982 |
0.04211 |
226 |
154 |
54 |
18 |
256 |
Let’s clear up that blockage. |
1.3974 |
0.04395 |
229 |
161 |
45 |
23 |
257 |
The good news is that you are aging wonderfully... |
1.3973 |
0.04511 |
224 |
159 |
41 |
24 |
258 |
You don't look a day over '49." |
1.3970 |
0.04770 |
199 |
141 |
37 |
21 |
259 |
Relax. It's just to help you breathe easier. |
1.3965 |
0.04102 |
227 |
153 |
58 |
16 |
260 |
This should help you breathe a little better |
1.3964 |
0.04214 |
222 |
151 |
54 |
17 |
261 |
The sooner we do this, the sooner we get to happy hour |
1.3962 |
0.04352 |
212 |
145 |
50 |
17 |
262 |
It's a total coincidence that we scheduled you for New Year's Eve. |
1.3960 |
0.04459 |
250 |
183 |
35 |
32 |
263 |
It's just a little poke and afterward you'll be able to breathe much better. |
1.3955 |
0.04140 |
220 |
148 |
57 |
15 |
264 |
Post surgery you’ll go to the recycling ward. |
1.3955 |
0.04336 |
220 |
152 |
49 |
19 |
265 |
I warmed it up |
1.3949 |
0.04729 |
195 |
137 |
39 |
19 |
266 |
Let's take a look, shall we? You may feel a slight prick... |
1.3946 |
0.04150 |
223 |
151 |
56 |
16 |
267 |
The bad news: you're all stopped up. The good news: I can treat it. |
1.3946 |
0.04731 |
185 |
128 |
41 |
16 |
268 |
It's a standard procedure for someone your age. |
1.3939 |
0.03908 |
231 |
153 |
65 |
13 |
269 |
This is just a routine procedure for someone your age.. |
1.3939 |
0.04508 |
198 |
136 |
46 |
16 |
270 |
You’ve aged well. |
1.3938 |
0.04159 |
226 |
154 |
55 |
17 |
271 |
This is going to help me more than it will help you. |
1.3934 |
0.04363 |
211 |
145 |
49 |
17 |
272 |
The good news is you’ve aged quite nicely. |
1.3932 |
0.04059 |
234 |
159 |
58 |
17 |
273 |
Good news! I'll have you breathing in no time! |
1.3929 |
0.04278 |
224 |
155 |
50 |
19 |
274 |
Believe me the only one that will have a headache after the procedure is me. |
1.3923 |
0.04443 |
209 |
145 |
46 |
18 |
275 |
I understand you've had trouble breathing? |
1.3921 |
0.04144 |
227 |
155 |
55 |
17 |
276 |
You open up and I’ll say “ahhh”. |
1.3920 |
0.04656 |
199 |
140 |
40 |
19 |
277 |
I've got something that should help you breathe. |
1.3911 |
0.04263 |
225 |
156 |
50 |
19 |
278 |
I’d like to get a second opinion |
1.3909 |
0.04521 |
197 |
136 |
45 |
16 |
279 |
After the procedure you may feel a little lightheaded. I know I will. |
1.3908 |
0.04802 |
174 |
120 |
40 |
14 |
280 |
It's a relaxing procedure that I perform with Brie and bread. |
1.3905 |
0.04426 |
210 |
146 |
46 |
18 |
281 |
Don't worry, it will help you breathe... |
1.3904 |
0.04628 |
187 |
129 |
43 |
15 |
282 |
''Let's see how well you've aged.'' |
1.3900 |
0.04102 |
241 |
167 |
54 |
20 |
283 |
You need glasses. |
1.3900 |
0.04797 |
200 |
144 |
34 |
22 |
284 |
...and it will help your breathing. |
1.3898 |
0.04207 |
236 |
165 |
50 |
21 |
285 |
I don't take Medicare but I do barter. |
1.3892 |
0.04692 |
203 |
145 |
37 |
21 |
286 |
Everyone your age gets this procedure |
1.3891 |
0.04502 |
221 |
158 |
40 |
23 |
287 |
Losing your cork should be with someone special |
1.3889 |
0.04287 |
216 |
149 |
50 |
17 |
288 |
Relax, open-cork surgery is now an out-patient procedure. |
1.3882 |
0.03901 |
255 |
175 |
61 |
19 |
289 |
I have something that will help you breathe easier. |
1.3877 |
0.03946 |
227 |
152 |
62 |
13 |
290 |
You've aged quite well. |
1.3877 |
0.03946 |
227 |
152 |
62 |
13 |
291 |
I have a little something to help you breathe! |
1.3876 |
0.04385 |
209 |
145 |
47 |
17 |
292 |
I’m sensing notes of bitterness. |
1.3876 |
0.04225 |
209 |
142 |
53 |
14 |
293 |
It’s not healthy to keep things bottled up, Mr. Sauvignon. |
1.3874 |
0.04675 |
191 |
134 |
40 |
17 |
294 |
Now, we're going to see how well you're aging. |
1.3871 |
0.04169 |
217 |
148 |
54 |
15 |
295 |
My diagnosis is good news and bad news:
I'm about to get drunk,
and you're about to get screwed. |
1.3865 |
0.04771 |
207 |
151 |
32 |
24 |
296 |
Define ‘invasive.’ |
1.3864 |
0.04326 |
220 |
154 |
47 |
19 |
297 |
It’s a very common procedure once you get older. |
1.3857 |
0.04423 |
223 |
159 |
42 |
22 |
298 |
I'm pleased to announce a solution to aging. |
1.3846 |
0.04010 |
208 |
138 |
60 |
10 |
299 |
Good news! Your insurance covers my corkage fee. |
1.3846 |
0.04512 |
182 |
124 |
46 |
12 |
300 |
You'll just feel a small pinch and some pressure. |
1.3842 |
0.04362 |
203 |
140 |
48 |
15 |
301 |
Just need to do a quick full-bodied exam. |
1.3838 |
0.04321 |
198 |
135 |
50 |
13 |
302 |
It's a totally non-invasive procedure...we won't need to open you up... |
1.3838 |
0.04201 |
198 |
133 |
54 |
11 |
303 |
Don’t worry. I’ve performed this procedure successfully thousands of times. |
1.3838 |
0.04663 |
198 |
141 |
38 |
19 |
304 |
This will help you to breathe. |
1.3835 |
0.04262 |
206 |
141 |
51 |
14 |
305 |
Anyone would feel lousy after thirty years in a cellar. |
1.3834 |
0.04636 |
193 |
136 |
40 |
17 |
306 |
I know you haven't been looking forward to this, but now that you are over 50... |
1.3831 |
0.04612 |
201 |
143 |
39 |
19 |
307 |
Oh it's just a little prick. |
1.3831 |
0.04447 |
201 |
140 |
45 |
16 |
308 |
Once it's out, you'll stop aging altogether! |
1.3828 |
0.04432 |
209 |
147 |
44 |
18 |
309 |
No, no, no. A colonoscopy is for people, this is totally different. |
1.3825 |
0.04602 |
217 |
158 |
35 |
24 |
310 |
It’s just a little prick … |
1.3821 |
0.04335 |
212 |
148 |
47 |
17 |
311 |
Ahh, my 5 o'clock appointment. |
1.3820 |
0.05040 |
178 |
129 |
30 |
19 |
312 |
You might feel a little pressure. |
1.3818 |
0.04368 |
220 |
156 |
44 |
20 |
313 |
I do like a wine that really speaks to me" |
1.3814 |
0.04240 |
215 |
149 |
50 |
16 |
314 |
My, you've aged nicely! |
1.3805 |
0.04437 |
205 |
144 |
44 |
17 |
315 |
This is what happens when you refused a screw top |
1.3805 |
0.04647 |
205 |
148 |
36 |
21 |
316 |
You’ll just feel a little pinch and I’ll feel much better. I mean you’ll feel much better. |
1.3803 |
0.04419 |
213 |
151 |
43 |
19 |
317 |
I have just the thing to help take the pressure off. |
1.3801 |
0.03956 |
221 |
149 |
60 |
12 |
318 |
Am I going to find any alcohol in your system? |
1.3800 |
0.04402 |
200 |
139 |
46 |
15 |
319 |
After the procedure you'll be able to breathe. |
1.3798 |
0.04390 |
208 |
146 |
45 |
17 |
320 |
Ah. Since 1975 you say. |
1.3797 |
0.04182 |
237 |
168 |
48 |
21 |
321 |
You're about to get screwed! |
1.3796 |
0.04585 |
245 |
186 |
25 |
34 |
322 |
Let's take a look inside and see if you're aging well. |
1.3795 |
0.04420 |
195 |
135 |
46 |
14 |
323 |
You're big, I have a big one too. |
1.3791 |
0.04975 |
211 |
161 |
20 |
30 |
324 |
If everything is fine, you can return to the cellar for ten more years. |
1.3791 |
0.04187 |
211 |
145 |
52 |
14 |
325 |
What if I said you don't need to age anymore? |
1.3787 |
0.05028 |
169 |
121 |
32 |
16 |
326 |
The truth is, you won't get better with age |
1.3785 |
0.04250 |
214 |
149 |
49 |
16 |
327 |
Just a little shot. Won’t hurt a bit. |
1.3783 |
0.04043 |
230 |
159 |
55 |
16 |
328 |
It will all be over with in one happy hour. |
1.3781 |
0.04496 |
201 |
142 |
42 |
17 |
329 |
And in an hour I won't feel a thing either. |
1.3780 |
0.04579 |
209 |
151 |
37 |
21 |
330 |
And after you've had a chance to breathe, we'd love to have you at our office party. |
1.3778 |
0.04605 |
180 |
125 |
42 |
13 |
331 |
Relax. I’ve done this procedure thousands of times. |
1.3770 |
0.04808 |
183 |
131 |
35 |
17 |
332 |
I understand you felt a little bottled up lately |
1.3770 |
0.04870 |
183 |
132 |
33 |
18 |
333 |
It's okay to be nervous, but this procedure becomes critical at a certain age. |
1.3767 |
0.04130 |
215 |
148 |
53 |
14 |
334 |
We’ll have you breathing better in no time. |
1.3766 |
0.03886 |
231 |
157 |
61 |
13 |
335 |
For this procedure we'll need some cheese. |
1.3765 |
0.04862 |
170 |
120 |
36 |
14 |
336 |
Given your age, I recommend we run some additional tastes-- I mean, tests. |
1.3763 |
0.04779 |
194 |
141 |
33 |
20 |
337 |
I’m just going to check your nose. |
1.3757 |
0.04449 |
189 |
131 |
45 |
13 |
338 |
Relax. This is going to help you breathe. |
1.3756 |
0.04558 |
197 |
140 |
40 |
17 |
339 |
The good news is this will help you to breathe. |
1.3756 |
0.04430 |
205 |
145 |
43 |
17 |
340 |
I have something to help you breathe. |
1.3750 |
0.04603 |
176 |
122 |
42 |
12 |
341 |
Trust me, you’ll feel better once you breathe. |
1.3750 |
0.04508 |
200 |
142 |
41 |
17 |
342 |
This next procedure is to help you breathe. |
1.3750 |
0.04222 |
208 |
144 |
50 |
14 |
343 |
You'll be able to breathe easier now. |
1.3744 |
0.04292 |
203 |
141 |
48 |
14 |
344 |
I have just the thing that will open you up and help you breathe. |
1.3744 |
0.04459 |
203 |
144 |
42 |
17 |
345 |
Are you aware of any screw caps in your family history? |
1.3744 |
0.04703 |
195 |
141 |
35 |
19 |
346 |
Stopped up, you say? Don't worry.
I'll have you breathing in no time. |
1.3743 |
0.04415 |
187 |
129 |
46 |
12 |
347 |
Don't worry, this is a routine procedure for bottles of your vintage. |
1.3743 |
0.04543 |
187 |
131 |
42 |
14 |
348 |
Unfortunately, Medicare only covers screw-tops. |
1.3736 |
0.04694 |
182 |
129 |
38 |
15 |
349 |
Don't worry, this is totally normal for bottles your age. |
1.3729 |
0.04651 |
177 |
124 |
40 |
13 |
350 |
I'll need a sample. |
1.3728 |
0.04804 |
169 |
119 |
37 |
13 |
351 |
After it's over, I'm going to feel so much better. |
1.3728 |
0.04804 |
169 |
119 |
37 |
13 |
352 |
The good news is, we caught it before it turned |
1.3720 |
0.04670 |
164 |
113 |
41 |
10 |
353 |
This is going to hurt a little, but it will really help you to breathe. |
1.3717 |
0.04595 |
191 |
136 |
39 |
16 |
354 |
Guess who I paired you with? |
1.3713 |
0.04359 |
202 |
142 |
45 |
15 |
355 |
This won’t hurt. You’ll just hear a little pop. |
1.3709 |
0.04305 |
213 |
151 |
45 |
17 |
356 |
Take my word, once it's out you're going to breathe a lot easier. |
1.3700 |
0.04772 |
200 |
148 |
30 |
22 |
357 |
I heard you've been having some trouble breathing. |
1.3699 |
0.04273 |
173 |
116 |
50 |
7 |
358 |
This procedure will help you breathe a little. |
1.3699 |
0.04861 |
173 |
124 |
34 |
15 |
359 |
The good news is, the corkage fee is covered by your insurance. |
1.3698 |
0.04750 |
192 |
140 |
33 |
19 |
360 |
Relax. This is standard procedure at your age. |
1.3697 |
0.04486 |
211 |
153 |
38 |
20 |
361 |
My wife and I thought you might join us for dinner tonight. |
1.3696 |
0.04715 |
184 |
132 |
36 |
16 |
362 |
I hear you're having trouble breathing. |
1.3684 |
0.04294 |
190 |
131 |
48 |
11 |
363 |
Really, every bottle over 50 years old should have this procedure done. |
1.3684 |
0.04607 |
190 |
136 |
38 |
16 |
364 |
The nurse tells me you're having trouble breathing. |
1.3684 |
0.04294 |
190 |
131 |
48 |
11 |
365 |
It’s recommended once you reach a certain age |
1.3684 |
0.04422 |
190 |
133 |
44 |
13 |
366 |
Let's get to the bottom of this. |
1.3682 |
0.04254 |
201 |
140 |
48 |
13 |
367 |
We’ll have that sediment out in no time. |
1.3681 |
0.04686 |
182 |
130 |
37 |
15 |
368 |
Let's take a look at those legs, shall we? |
1.3676 |
0.04694 |
185 |
133 |
36 |
16 |
369 |
This procedure will definitely allow you to breathe better. |
1.3673 |
0.05468 |
147 |
108 |
24 |
15 |
370 |
It's just a simple procedure to remove that blockage |
1.3670 |
0.04640 |
188 |
135 |
37 |
16 |
371 |
I won’t feel a thing. |
1.3670 |
0.04937 |
188 |
140 |
27 |
21 |
372 |
It’s a little radical, but it will stop the aging process. |
1.3669 |
0.05010 |
169 |
123 |
30 |
16 |
373 |
My procedure will let you breathe. |
1.3665 |
0.04705 |
191 |
139 |
34 |
18 |
374 |
It's a reliable technique that will help you breathe. |
1.3661 |
0.04467 |
183 |
128 |
43 |
12 |
375 |
Once you reach a certain age, this check up is recommended |
1.3657 |
0.04677 |
175 |
124 |
38 |
13 |
376 |
You’re going to feel just a little bit of pressure |
1.3656 |
0.04735 |
186 |
135 |
34 |
17 |
377 |
Afterwards, we can drink to your health. |
1.3654 |
0.04423 |
208 |
150 |
40 |
18 |
378 |
You might hear a "pop". |
1.3653 |
0.04832 |
167 |
119 |
35 |
13 |
379 |
I think we can get to the bottom of this if you just open up a bit. |
1.3653 |
0.04361 |
167 |
113 |
47 |
7 |
380 |
You’re screwed either way. |
1.3652 |
0.04822 |
178 |
129 |
33 |
16 |
381 |
Trust me, you'll breathe much better after this. |
1.3650 |
0.04204 |
200 |
139 |
49 |
12 |
382 |
The surgery's risky but makes a fun sound. |
1.3646 |
0.04507 |
192 |
137 |
40 |
15 |
383 |
You'll be better after you breathe for a few hours. |
1.3646 |
0.04626 |
192 |
139 |
36 |
17 |
384 |
I have a procedure that will help you breathe |
1.3642 |
0.04777 |
162 |
114 |
37 |
11 |
385 |
Good news: you're at the prime of your life. |
1.3641 |
0.04770 |
184 |
134 |
33 |
17 |
386 |
Once I pull the cork out, you will be able to breathe. |
1.3636 |
0.04463 |
187 |
132 |
42 |
13 |
387 |
Our first step is to remove that cork so you can breathe. |
1.3636 |
0.04716 |
165 |
116 |
38 |
11 |
388 |
This procedure is called a 'taste test.' |
1.3636 |
0.04590 |
187 |
134 |
38 |
15 |
389 |
Screw YOU, doctor! |
1.3631 |
0.04808 |
168 |
120 |
35 |
13 |
390 |
Side effects? ...Well, some patients report an empty feeling. |
1.3626 |
0.04819 |
171 |
123 |
34 |
14 |
391 |
This will be an outpatient-into-doctor procedure. |
1.3626 |
0.05296 |
171 |
130 |
20 |
21 |
392 |
Come on, baby, let's do the twist. |
1.3626 |
0.04890 |
171 |
124 |
32 |
15 |
393 |
This should help you breathe better. |
1.3625 |
0.04732 |
160 |
112 |
38 |
10 |
394 |
Yes, you really have aged quite well. |
1.3622 |
0.04428 |
185 |
130 |
43 |
12 |
395 |
This procedure should leave you drained and me drunk. |
1.3620 |
0.04753 |
163 |
115 |
37 |
11 |
396 |
Relax, I'm just here to serve you. |
1.3620 |
0.04672 |
163 |
114 |
39 |
10 |
397 |
I'm going to change you from a full bottle in front of me to a full frontal lobotomy. |
1.3620 |
0.05209 |
163 |
121 |
25 |
17 |
398 |
Unfortunately, it seems you’re at that age… |
1.3618 |
0.04390 |
199 |
142 |
42 |
15 |
399 |
I'm interested in your case. |
1.3616 |
0.04563 |
177 |
125 |
40 |
12 |
400 |
No worries, we're just going to draw a little sample |
1.3611 |
0.04987 |
144 |
101 |
34 |
9 |
401 |
I’m very interested in your case. |
1.3611 |
0.04510 |
180 |
127 |
41 |
12 |
402 |
Now don’t you worry...it’s just a little something to help you breathe |
1.3608 |
0.04644 |
194 |
142 |
34 |
18 |
403 |
This will take care of that stopped-up feeling. |
1.3607 |
0.04390 |
183 |
128 |
44 |
11 |
404 |
I'm going to draw some fluid and have it tested for structure and bouquet over dinner. |
1.3602 |
0.04790 |
161 |
114 |
36 |
11 |
405 |
The party at table 6 will cover your copay. |
1.3602 |
0.04454 |
161 |
110 |
44 |
7 |
406 |
Look at it this way - you won't be sitting in that cold, dark cellar any more. |
1.3602 |
0.04538 |
186 |
133 |
39 |
14 |
407 |
Don’t be so dramatic. We both knew this day would come. |
1.3602 |
0.04408 |
186 |
131 |
43 |
12 |
408 |
There's no sugercoating this. You're going to be screwed. |
1.3596 |
0.04747 |
178 |
129 |
34 |
15 |
409 |
It will help you breath. |
1.3593 |
0.04669 |
167 |
118 |
38 |
11 |
410 |
Just bend over-this won't hurt a bit/ |
1.3593 |
0.04512 |
167 |
116 |
42 |
9 |
411 |
Yes the procedure is painful and irreversible, but after about 30 minutes you’ll notice pleasant notes of cinnamon, leather and tobacco |
1.3591 |
0.05006 |
181 |
136 |
25 |
20 |
412 |
Good news - the corkage fee is covered by your insurance. |
1.3590 |
0.04721 |
156 |
109 |
38 |
9 |
413 |
Let's get to the bottom of the problem. |
1.3588 |
0.04536 |
170 |
119 |
41 |
10 |
414 |
Believe me, sir, you prefer this corkscrew to my index. |
1.3586 |
0.05055 |
145 |
103 |
32 |
10 |
415 |
We'll go nice and slow. Not like when Champagne comes in. |
1.3586 |
0.05508 |
145 |
108 |
22 |
15 |
416 |
Luckily, bordeaux is the universal donor. |
1.3585 |
0.04910 |
159 |
114 |
33 |
12 |
417 |
...and best of all, when you hear a 'pop', you'll stop aging.' |
1.3584 |
0.04630 |
173 |
123 |
38 |
12 |
418 |
After I remove the obstruction just try to breathe. |
1.3580 |
0.05152 |
162 |
120 |
26 |
16 |
419 |
Stopped up, are you? |
1.3580 |
0.04645 |
176 |
126 |
37 |
13 |
420 |
'No not true, more like a slight prick.' |
1.3576 |
0.04626 |
165 |
116 |
39 |
10 |
421 |
After this simple procedure you will breathe a lot easier. |
1.3576 |
0.04935 |
165 |
120 |
31 |
14 |
422 |
Of cork...I mean, of course, it's a safe procedure. |
1.3575 |
0.04590 |
179 |
128 |
38 |
13 |
423 |
Now, we'll just have you open and I'll say 'ahhhh'." |
1.3568 |
0.04677 |
185 |
135 |
34 |
16 |
424 |
We'll need to run a few simple tests. |
1.3567 |
0.04437 |
171 |
119 |
43 |
9 |
425 |
As soon as I extract the blockage, you'll breathe normally |
1.3567 |
0.04951 |
157 |
113 |
32 |
12 |
426 |
We're going to have to run some tastes. |
1.3564 |
0.04434 |
188 |
134 |
41 |
13 |
427 |
Let's see if you've aged well. |
1.3563 |
0.04461 |
174 |
122 |
42 |
10 |
428 |
This is a standard procedures for wines over 40. |
1.3563 |
0.04679 |
174 |
125 |
36 |
13 |
429 |
It's a minor procedure. We hope to have you out by dinner time. |
1.3559 |
0.04482 |
177 |
125 |
41 |
11 |
430 |
You may feel a tiny poke...followed by aggressive twisting and a hard yank. |
1.3557 |
0.04459 |
194 |
140 |
39 |
15 |
431 |
The bad news is, it's spread to your cork. The good news is, I'm having a dinner party tonight. |
1.3556 |
0.04702 |
180 |
131 |
34 |
15 |
432 |
Remember - you can’t recant what you decant. |
1.3556 |
0.04430 |
180 |
127 |
42 |
11 |
433 |
Don't worry! Decanting is all part of the aging process. |
1.3553 |
0.04527 |
197 |
144 |
36 |
17 |
434 |
You will hear a loud pop, but then I can assure you that you will breathe better. |
1.3553 |
0.05395 |
152 |
114 |
22 |
16 |
435 |
Corked? I've got just the thing." |
1.3550 |
0.04624 |
169 |
120 |
38 |
11 |
436 |
We can’t give you a diagnosis until we open you up. |
1.3550 |
0.04919 |
169 |
124 |
30 |
15 |
437 |
This will help you breathe better. |
1.3550 |
0.04247 |
200 |
142 |
45 |
13 |
438 |
Hey. Would I screw you? |
1.3548 |
0.04907 |
155 |
111 |
33 |
11 |
439 |
Well, there are certain procedures we recommend for patients of your vintage… |
1.3548 |
0.04821 |
155 |
110 |
35 |
10 |
440 |
It's simple and quick operation. We'll schedule it for dinner tomorrow evening. |
1.3543 |
0.04727 |
175 |
127 |
34 |
14 |
441 |
Well, test results are in. No matter what, you're pretty much screwed. |
1.3543 |
0.04997 |
175 |
131 |
26 |
18 |
442 |
There is one procedure that will help you to breathe |
1.3540 |
0.05016 |
161 |
118 |
29 |
14 |
443 |
Don’t worry. This is a very routine procedure at your age. |
1.3539 |
0.04242 |
178 |
123 |
47 |
8 |
444 |
Yes, you are going to get screwed, but Medicare will pay for it. |
1.3538 |
0.04320 |
195 |
139 |
43 |
13 |
445 |
I can help you with your difficulty breathing |
1.3536 |
0.04479 |
181 |
129 |
40 |
12 |
446 |
You'll hear a pop, but it's just to get a sample |
1.3536 |
0.04340 |
181 |
127 |
44 |
10 |
447 |
To start, I just want you to breathe for a few minutes. |
1.3533 |
0.04223 |
184 |
128 |
47 |
9 |
448 |
'We're going to let you breathe' |
1.3529 |
0.04587 |
153 |
106 |
40 |
7 |
449 |
It won't hurt a bit, and will allow you to breathe. |
1.3529 |
0.04861 |
153 |
109 |
34 |
10 |
450 |
I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you’re the perfect age. The bad news is that you’re the perfect age. |
1.3529 |
0.04965 |
170 |
126 |
28 |
16 |
451 |
I’m a screw top”, heard it before |
1.3529 |
0.04894 |
170 |
125 |
30 |
15 |
452 |
Don't worry, it's a natural part of the aging process. |
1.3526 |
0.04965 |
156 |
113 |
31 |
12 |
453 |
I see you brought your own anesthesia |
1.3525 |
0.05486 |
139 |
103 |
23 |
13 |
454 |
There's only one way to find out. |
1.3523 |
0.04635 |
176 |
127 |
36 |
13 |
455 |
At your age, I recommend relieving your stress the old fashion way. |
1.3520 |
0.04369 |
179 |
126 |
43 |
10 |
456 |
We generally recommend putting off this procedure for a few more years. |
1.3519 |
0.04834 |
162 |
117 |
33 |
12 |
457 |
No worries. Just lean forward please. |
1.3517 |
0.04646 |
145 |
100 |
39 |
6 |
458 |
It’s unhealthy to keep things bottled up for too long. |
1.3516 |
0.04459 |
182 |
130 |
40 |
12 |
459 |
Well – it's 5 o'clock somewhere! |
1.3515 |
0.04999 |
165 |
122 |
28 |
15 |
460 |
I can assure you it helped my last patient breathe exquisitely |
1.3514 |
0.04540 |
185 |
134 |
37 |
14 |
461 |
Considering your vintage, it's time for a colonoscopy. |
1.3512 |
0.05076 |
168 |
126 |
25 |
17 |
462 |
Open up and breathe. |
1.3503 |
0.04596 |
157 |
110 |
39 |
8 |
463 |
I’m happy to report that you have aged to perfection. |
1.3503 |
0.04506 |
157 |
109 |
41 |
7 |
464 |
Like I tell my IUD patients- you'll only feel a tiny pinch! |
1.3503 |
0.04770 |
157 |
112 |
35 |
10 |
465 |
So you're the guy my patients keep lying to me about. |
1.3503 |
0.04471 |
177 |
126 |
40 |
11 |
466 |
Every bottle of your vintage should have it done. |
1.3500 |
0.04624 |
160 |
113 |
38 |
9 |
467 |
Unfortunately the corkage fee is not covered under Medicare. |
1.3492 |
0.04593 |
189 |
139 |
34 |
16 |
468 |
You'll feel a little discomfort at first, but shortly thereafter you'll be able to breathe much easier. |
1.3484 |
0.04980 |
155 |
113 |
30 |
12 |
469 |
Now let's get that cork out and have a look. |
1.3484 |
0.04539 |
155 |
108 |
40 |
7 |
470 |
Let's drink to your health. |
1.3481 |
0.05077 |
135 |
96 |
31 |
8 |
471 |
I'd say there's a very good chance you'll be breathing better after this. |
1.3478 |
0.04141 |
184 |
128 |
48 |
8 |
472 |
It’s just a minor procedure to help you breathe. |
1.3478 |
0.04429 |
161 |
112 |
42 |
7 |
473 |
The good news is, this is a one-time procedure. |
1.3476 |
0.04862 |
164 |
120 |
31 |
13 |
474 |
Don't worry. This isn't my first extraction. |
1.3475 |
0.05031 |
141 |
101 |
31 |
9 |
475 |
I’m delighted to say that you have aged perfectly. |
1.3473 |
0.04724 |
167 |
121 |
34 |
12 |
476 |
Good news. No rubber glove today,....however.... |
1.3472 |
0.05336 |
144 |
107 |
24 |
13 |
477 |
There's only one way to tell if you've gotten better with age. |
1.3469 |
0.05076 |
147 |
107 |
29 |
11 |
478 |
Yes, we need to get to the bottom of this. |
1.3468 |
0.04066 |
173 |
118 |
50 |
5 |
479 |
No worries! It's just a little procedure to help you breathe. |
1.3467 |
0.04822 |
150 |
107 |
34 |
9 |
480 |
Just breath, at your age it’s important to have that removed |
1.3466 |
0.04694 |
176 |
129 |
33 |
14 |
481 |
I just need a little sample. |
1.3464 |
0.04573 |
153 |
107 |
39 |
7 |
482 |
Why do you think I want to screw you? |
1.3462 |
0.05354 |
156 |
119 |
20 |
17 |
483 |
Luckily for you, your copay covers the corkage fee. |
1.3459 |
0.05202 |
159 |
120 |
23 |
16 |
484 |
I can take care of that breathing problem in no time. |
1.3457 |
0.04542 |
188 |
138 |
35 |
15 |
485 |
Bend over and cough. |
1.3457 |
0.05055 |
162 |
121 |
26 |
15 |
486 |
Don’t worry, it’s quite common for someone of your vintage. |
1.3455 |
0.04521 |
165 |
117 |
39 |
9 |
487 |
It's just a little pinch, and then you'll be able to breathe |
1.3452 |
0.04393 |
197 |
144 |
38 |
15 |
488 |
The pain is bearable, although you will let out a little whine " |
1.3448 |
0.05305 |
145 |
108 |
24 |
13 |
489 |
After the distilling procedure, you’ll be in good spirits. |
1.3448 |
0.04586 |
174 |
126 |
36 |
12 |
490 |
Are you ok? You’re looking a little white. |
1.3448 |
0.04439 |
174 |
124 |
40 |
10 |
491 |
You'll feel a little pressure and may hear a popping sound... |
1.3448 |
0.04935 |
174 |
131 |
26 |
17 |
492 |
Hi there, I’m Dr. Sommelier. |
1.3442 |
0.04994 |
154 |
113 |
29 |
12 |
493 |
You just can't keep it all bottled up inside you anymore... |
1.3439 |
0.04757 |
157 |
113 |
34 |
10 |
494 |
It's normal to be nervous, just breathe. |
1.3439 |
0.04492 |
157 |
110 |
40 |
7 |
495 |
Do I detect a note of squeamishness? |
1.3439 |
0.04582 |
157 |
111 |
38 |
8 |
496 |
It's almost laparoscopic! |
1.3438 |
0.04525 |
160 |
113 |
39 |
8 |
497 |
No charge! This test pays for itself. |
1.3436 |
0.04112 |
195 |
138 |
47 |
10 |
498 |
Don't worry, we'll bill the corkage fee to your HMO. |
1.3436 |
0.04636 |
163 |
117 |
36 |
10 |
499 |
This is my reward for living to a ripe old age?! |
1.3434 |
0.04498 |
166 |
118 |
39 |
9 |
500 |
And you thought your insurance company was screwing you... |
1.3433 |
0.05412 |
134 |
99 |
24 |
11 |
501 |
Don't worry. This treatment will help you breathe. |
1.3432 |
0.04200 |
169 |
117 |
46 |
6 |
502 |
We just need a sample. |
1.3431 |
0.04797 |
137 |
96 |
35 |
6 |
503 |
Well, I've got good news!
Your corkage fee IS covered by insurance. |
1.3429 |
0.05046 |
140 |
101 |
30 |
9 |
504 |
I admit it's a bit invasive, but I think we'll both feel better afterwards. |
1.3427 |
0.04649 |
178 |
131 |
33 |
14 |
505 |
Remember "No wine before its time?" Well, it's time. |
1.3423 |
0.04740 |
149 |
106 |
35 |
8 |
506 |
You’re going on 75. This procedure was bound to happen. |
1.3423 |
0.04928 |
149 |
108 |
31 |
10 |
507 |
No worries, Medicare covers the corkage fees! |
1.3423 |
0.04740 |
149 |
106 |
35 |
8 |
508 |
Yes, when you reach your age this is procedure is a requirement. |
1.3420 |
0.04452 |
193 |
142 |
36 |
15 |
509 |
It's just something to help you breathe. |
1.3419 |
0.04966 |
155 |
114 |
29 |
12 |
510 |
We're going to need to run some further tests, and some cheese. |
1.3418 |
0.04981 |
158 |
117 |
28 |
13 |
511 |
Relax—I did this a hundred times in med school. |
1.3413 |
0.04936 |
167 |
125 |
27 |
15 |
512 |
This should relieve the pressure." |
1.3413 |
0.04635 |
167 |
121 |
35 |
11 |
513 |
Your advanced age is not an obstacle, your sedimentation rate is stable, and so, I'm pleased to inform you that you qualify as a donor. |
1.3413 |
0.04788 |
167 |
123 |
31 |
13 |
514 |
Just a little poke. |
1.3410 |
0.04523 |
173 |
125 |
37 |
11 |
515 |
Please bend over and spread your cork. |
1.3410 |
0.05083 |
173 |
133 |
21 |
19 |
516 |
No, no, it's just a little something to help you breathe |
1.3410 |
0.04448 |
173 |
124 |
39 |
10 |
517 |
We'll both feel better once I drain a little fluid. |
1.3410 |
0.04741 |
173 |
128 |
31 |
14 |
518 |
Yes, reduction is free of charge. |
1.3406 |
0.04878 |
138 |
98 |
33 |
7 |
519 |
Sure I failed med school but I did pass the bar exam |
1.3404 |
0.05310 |
141 |
105 |
24 |
12 |
520 |
It will help you breathe, trust me. |
1.3399 |
0.04833 |
153 |
111 |
32 |
10 |
521 |
Your temperature is just right. |
1.3399 |
0.04652 |
153 |
109 |
36 |
8 |
522 |
Yes, I'm a proctologist but aspire to be a sommelier. |
1.3399 |
0.05093 |
153 |
114 |
26 |
13 |
523 |
I’d like to drink to your health! |
1.3399 |
0.04743 |
153 |
110 |
34 |
9 |
524 |
Don't worry it's a routine procedure for anyone over 45. |
1.3397 |
0.04855 |
156 |
114 |
31 |
11 |
525 |
You’ll feel a little pinch, but not to worry – I will feel better soon. |
1.3397 |
0.05022 |
156 |
116 |
27 |
13 |
526 |
Yes, of course you will be sedated. |
1.3396 |
0.04356 |
159 |
111 |
42 |
6 |
527 |
Feeling robust, are we? |
1.3396 |
0.04707 |
159 |
115 |
34 |
10 |
528 |
You'll feel momentary discomfort, but this should relieve the pressure! |
1.3395 |
0.04647 |
162 |
117 |
35 |
10 |
529 |
Let's just see if you've improved with age. |
1.3394 |
0.04425 |
165 |
117 |
40 |
8 |
530 |
Did I forgot to mention I'm both a proctologist AND a sommelier? |
1.3393 |
0.04911 |
168 |
126 |
27 |
15 |
531 |
I think you need to get some air |
1.3392 |
0.04323 |
171 |
121 |
42 |
8 |
532 |
Not to worry, your plan does pay for corkage. |
1.3391 |
0.04501 |
174 |
126 |
37 |
11 |
533 |
Great news! You're invited to our office party |
1.3387 |
0.05713 |
124 |
93 |
20 |
11 |
534 |
I have just the right thing to help you breathe. |
1.3386 |
0.04052 |
189 |
133 |
48 |
8 |
535 |
Don’t worry, it’s just a minor procedure to help you breathe. |
1.3382 |
0.05544 |
136 |
103 |
20 |
13 |
536 |
Bad news, I'm afraid. It'll have to come out. |
1.3382 |
0.05029 |
136 |
98 |
30 |
8 |
537 |
I suspect a blockage. |
1.3380 |
0.04986 |
142 |
103 |
30 |
9 |
538 |
The good news is your scans are all clear.
The bad news is let's celebrate. |
1.3379 |
0.04817 |
145 |
104 |
33 |
8 |
539 |
There's only one cure for keeping things bottled up inside |
1.3378 |
0.05123 |
148 |
110 |
26 |
12 |
540 |
Next we'll check to see how you're aging. |
1.3378 |
0.04751 |
148 |
106 |
34 |
8 |
541 |
We call this procedure the annual 'twist and shout' |
1.3376 |
0.04568 |
157 |
112 |
37 |
8 |
542 |
I'm afraid it will have to come out. |
1.3374 |
0.04623 |
163 |
118 |
35 |
10 |
543 |
All the symptoms you describe are just a part of the ageing process. |
1.3374 |
0.04704 |
163 |
119 |
33 |
11 |
544 |
Decant feel a thing. I promise. |
1.3364 |
0.05957 |
110 |
82 |
19 |
9 |
545 |
Actually I'm the sommelier. The doctor will bein as soon as he finishes curing a cheese. |
1.3358 |
0.05184 |
134 |
98 |
27 |
9 |
546 |
You’ll breathe easier. |
1.3357 |
0.05130 |
140 |
103 |
27 |
10 |
547 |
We’ll have you opened up in no time! |
1.3357 |
0.04754 |
143 |
102 |
34 |
7 |
548 |
It’s just to help you breathe a little. |
1.3356 |
0.04887 |
146 |
106 |
31 |
9 |
549 |
I’ll have you breathing in no time at all. |
1.3356 |
0.04789 |
146 |
105 |
33 |
8 |
550 |
I’ve operated on several patients your age. |
1.3356 |
0.04913 |
149 |
109 |
30 |
10 |
551 |
Good news: I think I can help you breathe! |
1.3355 |
0.04953 |
155 |
115 |
28 |
12 |
552 |
I think you’re screwed! |
1.3355 |
0.04868 |
155 |
114 |
30 |
11 |
553 |
After the procedure, your flow will be greatly improved. |
1.3354 |
0.04544 |
158 |
113 |
37 |
8 |
554 |
I'm here to help you open up. |
1.3354 |
0.04544 |
158 |
113 |
37 |
8 |
555 |
You'll feel a slight pinch... |
1.3354 |
0.04574 |
161 |
116 |
36 |
9 |
556 |
After the procedure I want you to breathe. |
1.3354 |
0.04488 |
161 |
115 |
38 |
8 |
557 |
The procedure is minimally invasive and will help you breathe." |
1.3354 |
0.04759 |
164 |
121 |
31 |
12 |
558 |
A corkonoscopy is quite normal for a wine of your age. |
1.3353 |
0.04850 |
167 |
125 |
28 |
14 |
559 |
You really are in perfect condition for your age. |
1.3353 |
0.04716 |
170 |
126 |
31 |
13 |
560 |
This is going to hurt you a lot more than me. |
1.3333 |
0.04543 |
153 |
109 |
37 |
7 |
561 |
I've been saving this appointment for a special occasion. |
1.3333 |
0.05361 |
135 |
101 |
23 |
11 |
562 |
You'll just feel a little poke... |
1.3333 |
0.04341 |
159 |
112 |
41 |
6 |
563 |
You look like you've aged well. Let's do some tests to be sure. |
1.3333 |
0.04999 |
141 |
103 |
29 |
9 |
564 |
Just a little stick here and all that pressure will be gone. |
1.3333 |
0.04412 |
165 |
118 |
39 |
8 |
565 |
You are just what the doctor ordered. |
1.3333 |
0.05593 |
120 |
89 |
22 |
9 |
566 |
Don't fret, it's a routine operation for a bottle of your age. |
1.3333 |
0.05316 |
129 |
95 |
25 |
9 |
567 |
You're on the donor list, correct? |
1.3333 |
0.04676 |
168 |
124 |
32 |
12 |
568 |
I have something here to help you breathe |
1.3333 |
0.04755 |
156 |
114 |
32 |
10 |
569 |
Just relax, I am a board certified sommelier. |
1.3333 |
0.04520 |
159 |
114 |
37 |
8 |
570 |
So…about that uncorking fee. |
1.3333 |
0.04667 |
156 |
113 |
34 |
9 |
571 |
In my professional judgement all you require is a little aeration. |
1.3333 |
0.04349 |
141 |
97 |
41 |
3 |
572 |
you want to put that where? |
1.3333 |
0.04837 |
171 |
129 |
27 |
15 |
573 |
I have just the thing for both our issues. |
1.3315 |
0.04195 |
178 |
127 |
43 |
8 |
574 |
No, no, no. I’m just admiring your label. |
1.3314 |
0.04521 |
172 |
126 |
35 |
11 |
575 |
Don't worry, I won't screw this up. |
1.3314 |
0.04419 |
169 |
122 |
38 |
9 |
576 |
We want to see how you've aged. |
1.3313 |
0.04306 |
166 |
118 |
41 |
7 |
577 |
This? This is just to help you breathe. |
1.3313 |
0.04850 |
163 |
122 |
28 |
13 |
578 |
Good news! You have been invited to a party! |
1.3313 |
0.04927 |
163 |
123 |
26 |
14 |
579 |
Stopped up? I've got just the solution |
1.3313 |
0.04668 |
160 |
117 |
33 |
10 |
580 |
This procedure is called a frontal lobottleamony. |
1.3312 |
0.05063 |
157 |
119 |
24 |
14 |
581 |
I can help you unwine. |
1.3311 |
0.04537 |
148 |
105 |
37 |
6 |
582 |
This is just something to help you breathe |
1.3310 |
0.04658 |
142 |
101 |
35 |
6 |
583 |
It’s a little bit like a colonoscopy. |
1.3309 |
0.05224 |
136 |
101 |
25 |
10 |
584 |
I don’t know what you’ve heard on the grapevine, but this is when everyone starts to have a great time |
1.3309 |
0.05528 |
136 |
104 |
19 |
13 |
585 |
It’s like a colonoscopy - only from the other end |
1.3309 |
0.05224 |
136 |
101 |
25 |
10 |
586 |
The good news is your health plan covers corkage fees. |
1.3307 |
0.05007 |
127 |
91 |
30 |
6 |
587 |
You may feel a small pinch. |
1.3293 |
0.04609 |
167 |
123 |
33 |
11 |
588 |
No need to whine, I’ll have you breathing easy in no time |
1.3293 |
0.04667 |
164 |
121 |
32 |
11 |
589 |
Good news! I've got something that's going to help you breathe. |
1.3292 |
0.04474 |
161 |
116 |
37 |
8 |
590 |
Just lie down and think of France. |
1.3292 |
0.04644 |
161 |
118 |
33 |
10 |
591 |
Don't worry, it's a common procedure. |
1.3291 |
0.04617 |
158 |
115 |
34 |
9 |
592 |
Once I remove that obstruction, you'll be able to breathe. |
1.3289 |
0.04552 |
152 |
109 |
36 |
7 |
593 |
It’s a diagnostic probing. You’ll only feel a pinch. |
1.3289 |
0.04646 |
152 |
110 |
34 |
8 |
594 |
I just want to examine your nose. |
1.3289 |
0.04552 |
152 |
109 |
36 |
7 |
595 |
You may feel a little pinch. |
1.3286 |
0.04803 |
140 |
101 |
32 |
7 |
596 |
I’ve gone through your notes - supple, full-bodied, and an excellent vintage. |
1.3285 |
0.05294 |
137 |
103 |
23 |
11 |
597 |
I'm going to remove the cork so you can breath properly. |
1.3282 |
0.05018 |
131 |
95 |
29 |
7 |
598 |
Looks like you’re going to have a frontal lobotomy, and I’m going to have a bottle in front of me. |
1.3282 |
0.05677 |
131 |
101 |
17 |
13 |
599 |
Now this is not going to hurt one bit. |
1.3281 |
0.05446 |
128 |
96 |
22 |
10 |
600 |
This will relieve the pressure for the both of us. |
1.3277 |
0.05352 |
119 |
87 |
25 |
7 |
601 |
Why, yes, I DO have a procedure that will relieve the pain in your head! |
1.3276 |
0.04550 |
174 |
129 |
33 |
12 |
602 |
Bend over and cough, please |
1.3272 |
0.04275 |
162 |
115 |
41 |
6 |
603 |
Now, now, you don't want to turn into vinegar do you? |
1.3272 |
0.04536 |
162 |
118 |
35 |
9 |
604 |
Well, you've reached that age. |
1.3270 |
0.04679 |
159 |
117 |
32 |
10 |
605 |
Please don't screw up. |
1.3269 |
0.04826 |
156 |
116 |
29 |
11 |
606 |
Unlike the others,this shot hurts when I pull it out. |
1.3269 |
0.04826 |
156 |
116 |
29 |
11 |
607 |
I promise: no needles! |
1.3267 |
0.04682 |
150 |
109 |
33 |
8 |
608 |
We'll all feel better when the procedure is over. |
1.3264 |
0.04911 |
144 |
106 |
29 |
9 |
609 |
Now now Mr. Merlot, let’s un-bottle that anxiety. |
1.3264 |
0.04709 |
144 |
104 |
33 |
7 |
610 |
Oh, I’m sorry, I thought you knew that “sommelier” is the French word for “proctologist”! |
1.3262 |
0.05181 |
141 |
106 |
24 |
11 |
611 |
Don’t worry, this will only hurt a little. |
1.3262 |
0.04982 |
141 |
104 |
28 |
9 |
612 |
Your test results came back. Let's savor the time you have. |
1.3262 |
0.04879 |
141 |
103 |
30 |
8 |
613 |
I think what you really need to do is just breathe. |
1.3261 |
0.05056 |
138 |
102 |
27 |
9 |
614 |
I've got just the cure for your pent-up stress . . . |
1.3261 |
0.05056 |
138 |
102 |
27 |
9 |
615 |
Not to worry, you may hear a slight popping sound. |
1.3256 |
0.05297 |
129 |
96 |
24 |
9 |
616 |
I only need a small sample for tasting - um, testing. |
1.3256 |
0.05297 |
129 |
96 |
24 |
9 |
617 |
If you thought colonoscopies were bad… |
1.3256 |
0.05181 |
129 |
95 |
26 |
8 |
618 |
Oui Monsieur Bordeaux...
25 years of age is a perfect time for this procedure |
1.3254 |
0.05501 |
126 |
95 |
21 |
10 |
619 |
You have a pocket of fluid that needs to be drained. |
1.3252 |
0.05476 |
123 |
92 |
22 |
9 |
620 |
Trust me, you'll be able to breathe a lot easier once I'm finished." |
1.3248 |
0.04714 |
157 |
116 |
31 |
10 |
621 |
You'll be able to breathe easier after the procedure. |
1.3248 |
0.04627 |
157 |
115 |
33 |
9 |
622 |
we need to have a more open relationship |
1.3248 |
0.05672 |
117 |
88 |
20 |
9 |
623 |
Nothing to worry about.
I perform corkectomies every single day. |
1.3247 |
0.05036 |
154 |
117 |
24 |
13 |
624 |
Don’t worry, this procedure will have you breathing better in no time |
1.3245 |
0.04656 |
151 |
110 |
33 |
8 |
625 |
I’ve come to help you breathe. |
1.3245 |
0.04260 |
151 |
106 |
41 |
4 |
626 |
I need to send a sample down to the lab. They’re having a birthday party. |
1.3237 |
0.04920 |
139 |
102 |
29 |
8 |
627 |
I hear you struggle with opening up |
1.3237 |
0.05228 |
139 |
105 |
23 |
11 |
628 |
Wine letting. We've done it for centuries. |
1.3237 |
0.04560 |
173 |
129 |
32 |
12 |
629 |
The good news is that you were born in a great year. |
1.3235 |
0.04769 |
136 |
98 |
32 |
6 |
630 |
It's a new technique
created by the French |
1.3235 |
0.05310 |
136 |
103 |
22 |
11 |
631 |
Don't worry. This is a standard procedure in cases like yours. |
1.3235 |
0.04882 |
136 |
99 |
30 |
7 |
632 |
The good news is that you don't need a colonoscopy! |
1.3232 |
0.04489 |
164 |
120 |
35 |
9 |
633 |
Don’t worry. When I’m finished, you’ll be able to breathe. |
1.3231 |
0.05697 |
130 |
101 |
16 |
13 |
634 |
You're just going to feel a little pinch. |
1.3226 |
0.04478 |
155 |
112 |
36 |
7 |
635 |
Well, we just need to get to the bottom of it |
1.3226 |
0.05316 |
124 |
92 |
24 |
8 |
636 |
First of all, you aren't being screwed. |
1.3224 |
0.04630 |
152 |
111 |
33 |
8 |
637 |
This may sting a little. |
1.3221 |
0.04881 |
149 |
111 |
28 |
10 |
638 |
It's a simple procedure for someone of your age. |
1.3219 |
0.05137 |
146 |
111 |
23 |
12 |
639 |
Lobottlemy" is such a clinical designation. We prefer "decanture. |
1.3214 |
0.04994 |
140 |
104 |
27 |
9 |
640 |
I promise you’ll feel a lot lighter after the procedure. |
1.3212 |
0.04629 |
165 |
123 |
31 |
11 |
641 |
I'm afraid we're going to have to open you up. |
1.3212 |
0.04962 |
137 |
101 |
28 |
8 |
642 |
It'll be out before you know it . |
1.3212 |
0.05173 |
137 |
103 |
24 |
10 |
643 |
Sir, I would never screw you! |
1.3212 |
0.05377 |
137 |
105 |
20 |
12 |
644 |
You'll feel a little pinch |
1.3209 |
0.05360 |
134 |
102 |
21 |
11 |
645 |
I'm just going to help you breathe. |
1.3208 |
0.04578 |
159 |
117 |
33 |
9 |
646 |
Good news! I have a cure for your breathing problem. |
1.3208 |
0.04578 |
159 |
117 |
33 |
9 |
647 |
You’ll breathe so much better when it’s out. |
1.3206 |
0.05227 |
131 |
98 |
24 |
9 |
648 |
Haha. 'I'm screwed.' That's a good one! |
1.3205 |
0.04725 |
156 |
116 |
30 |
10 |
649 |
On the count of three, I need you to breathe. |
1.3205 |
0.04546 |
156 |
114 |
34 |
8 |
650 |
I just need you to breathe. |
1.3203 |
0.04697 |
128 |
91 |
33 |
4 |
651 |
You'll be able to breathe. |
1.3200 |
0.04469 |
150 |
108 |
36 |
6 |
652 |
Don't worry. You'll only feel a little pinch. |
1.3200 |
0.04665 |
150 |
110 |
32 |
8 |
653 |
I know you're feeling stopped up, and I have just the thing. |
1.3197 |
0.04825 |
147 |
109 |
29 |
9 |
654 |
It's for your own good. Actually, for my own good. |
1.3188 |
0.04823 |
138 |
101 |
30 |
7 |
655 |
We'll just need to send a sample off to the lab for tasting. |
1.3186 |
0.05373 |
113 |
83 |
24 |
6 |
656 |
Just your standard lobottlemy |
1.3186 |
0.05223 |
113 |
82 |
26 |
5 |
657 |
Lobotomies: some call them archaic, I call them ‘vintage.’ |
1.3185 |
0.04893 |
135 |
99 |
29 |
7 |
658 |
If it's any consolation, you will be recycled. |
1.3185 |
0.04893 |
135 |
99 |
29 |
7 |
659 |
Good news! You're aging nicely. |
1.3182 |
0.04603 |
132 |
94 |
34 |
4 |
660 |
Better to have it out now while you're still fine. |
1.3182 |
0.04848 |
132 |
96 |
30 |
6 |
661 |
Good guess but no, that's not where this one goes. |
1.3179 |
0.04444 |
151 |
109 |
36 |
6 |
662 |
I assure you,it will help you breathe. |
1.3179 |
0.04733 |
151 |
112 |
30 |
9 |
663 |
Unfortunately we can’t give you anesthesia as you are the influence of alcohol |
1.3178 |
0.05501 |
129 |
99 |
19 |
11 |
664 |
Let me know if you feel any pain when I press down, okay? |
1.3174 |
0.04502 |
167 |
124 |
33 |
10 |
665 |
We can do this now, but I 'd rather you come back in five years. |
1.3173 |
0.05997 |
104 |
79 |
17 |
8 |
666 |
Think of it as giving yourself a chance to breathe. |
1.3172 |
0.04962 |
145 |
109 |
26 |
10 |
667 |
After this procedure you will be able to breathe. |
1.3172 |
0.04663 |
145 |
106 |
32 |
7 |
668 |
Allow me to help you breathe better! |
1.3171 |
0.05074 |
123 |
90 |
27 |
6 |
669 |
You can't breathe? Let me help. |
1.3171 |
0.05074 |
123 |
90 |
27 |
6 |
670 |
Just a twist and a pop, and you will be all better! |
1.3171 |
0.05575 |
123 |
94 |
19 |
10 |
671 |
The anesthetic comes right after the procedure. |
1.3169 |
0.04620 |
142 |
103 |
33 |
6 |
672 |
Of course, we won't really know how well you've aged until we open you up. |
1.3169 |
0.04934 |
142 |
106 |
27 |
9 |
673 |
It only hurts for a second, and then I feel great. |
1.3169 |
0.04832 |
142 |
105 |
29 |
8 |
674 |
I just need to drain some fluids. |
1.3167 |
0.05156 |
120 |
88 |
26 |
6 |
675 |
I'm going to need you to breathe for me." |
1.3165 |
0.04571 |
139 |
100 |
34 |
5 |
676 |
Good news! I'm having some guests for dinner, and you're invited. |
1.3165 |
0.05109 |
139 |
105 |
24 |
10 |
677 |
Everything is going to be fine. You just need to breathe. |
1.3165 |
0.05210 |
139 |
106 |
22 |
11 |
678 |
This is just what happens when you bottle things up. |
1.3165 |
0.04571 |
139 |
100 |
34 |
5 |
679 |
We just need to draw a sample to run some tests. |
1.3162 |
0.05516 |
117 |
88 |
21 |
8 |
680 |
You may experience a little mild discomfort. |
1.3162 |
0.04749 |
136 |
99 |
31 |
6 |
681 |
You've reached the age where we have to do this. |
1.3161 |
0.04645 |
155 |
115 |
31 |
9 |
682 |
Bad news is, we have to operate and with no sedation. |
1.3158 |
0.05476 |
114 |
85 |
22 |
7 |
683 |
You're just going to feel a little bit of pressure. |
1.3158 |
0.04888 |
152 |
115 |
26 |
11 |
684 |
It's only a question of time! |
1.3158 |
0.04574 |
133 |
95 |
34 |
4 |
685 |
Now I'm going to ask that you breathe. |
1.3158 |
0.04977 |
152 |
116 |
24 |
12 |
686 |
You're going to feel a tiny jab. |
1.3158 |
0.05160 |
133 |
100 |
24 |
9 |
687 |
No worries! I do this procedure every day around this time. |
1.3154 |
0.05395 |
149 |
118 |
15 |
16 |
688 |
You may not feel any better afterward, but I sure will. |
1.3154 |
0.04770 |
149 |
111 |
29 |
9 |
689 |
Don't be embarrassed, this happens to pinots as they age |
1.3154 |
0.05047 |
149 |
114 |
23 |
12 |
690 |
Don't worry. I've performed this procedure thousands of times. |
1.3154 |
0.05126 |
130 |
97 |
25 |
8 |
691 |
A little pop and then you can breathe. |
1.3152 |
0.04367 |
165 |
121 |
36 |
8 |
692 |
'It's called acupuncture' |
1.3152 |
0.04533 |
165 |
123 |
32 |
10 |
693 |
Well, at least I didn't say bend over ! |
1.3143 |
0.04764 |
140 |
103 |
30 |
7 |
694 |
The lab report came back. Good news, you were a very good vintage. |
1.3141 |
0.04709 |
156 |
117 |
29 |
10 |
695 |
So, you indicated that you're have a problem breathing. |
1.3140 |
0.05253 |
121 |
90 |
24 |
7 |
696 |
This is where you get screwed. |
1.3139 |
0.05049 |
137 |
103 |
25 |
9 |
697 |
Once we get that fluid drained we'll both feel better. |
1.3139 |
0.04832 |
137 |
101 |
29 |
7 |
698 |
Aging won't be an issue for you. |
1.3139 |
0.04832 |
137 |
101 |
29 |
7 |
699 |
It’s a slightly invasive procedure but we want to rule out any bad pairing with cheese. |
1.3139 |
0.05258 |
137 |
105 |
21 |
11 |
700 |
You’re anxiety can be alleviated with some simple breathing techniques. |
1.3137 |
0.04771 |
153 |
115 |
28 |
10 |
701 |
You've aged wonderfully, my dear. Now, let's put it to the test. |
1.3137 |
0.04396 |
153 |
111 |
36 |
6 |
702 |
I'm more of an enthusiast than a doctor. |
1.3136 |
0.04918 |
118 |
85 |
29 |
4 |
703 |
Have you ever heard of a lobottlemy? |
1.3134 |
0.05235 |
134 |
102 |
22 |
10 |
704 |
And then we’ll check your legs. |
1.3134 |
0.05235 |
134 |
102 |
22 |
10 |
705 |
I'm happy to report that you're screwed. |
1.3130 |
0.05574 |
115 |
87 |
20 |
8 |
706 |
If everything's good we won't have to do it again for ten years. |
1.3130 |
0.04857 |
131 |
96 |
29 |
6 |
707 |
Relax! I have performed thousands of labottlemies! |
1.3130 |
0.05093 |
131 |
98 |
25 |
8 |
708 |
It's a minor outpatient procedure. |
1.3130 |
0.05318 |
131 |
100 |
21 |
10 |
709 |
I have the MRI results. It turns out that you're delicious! |
1.3125 |
0.05070 |
144 |
110 |
23 |
11 |
710 |
Stop wining. It is a simple procedure - not a lobottlemy. |
1.3125 |
0.04671 |
144 |
106 |
31 |
7 |
711 |
Open wide and say, "terroir". |
1.3121 |
0.04841 |
141 |
105 |
28 |
8 |
712 |
Can I call you a Cab? |
1.3119 |
0.05636 |
109 |
82 |
20 |
7 |
713 |
Let's release those bottled-up emotions. |
1.3119 |
0.05636 |
109 |
82 |
20 |
7 |
714 |
don't worry, I've done this procedure over 200 times, maybe more. |
1.3119 |
0.05636 |
109 |
82 |
20 |
7 |
715 |
Well,the good news is that we should be able to remove it |
1.3119 |
0.06071 |
109 |
85 |
14 |
10 |
716 |
I just want to uncork your potential. |
1.3117 |
0.04654 |
154 |
115 |
30 |
9 |
717 |
Don't worry! Everyone your vintage has this procedure. |
1.3117 |
0.04654 |
154 |
115 |
30 |
9 |
718 |
I'm here to get rid of your blockage. |
1.3116 |
0.04460 |
138 |
99 |
35 |
4 |
719 |
Ok, Mr. Merlot, we have an exciting new method of getting down to your problem! |
1.3116 |
0.04339 |
138 |
98 |
37 |
3 |
720 |
The good news is we're only going to have to do this once. |
1.3116 |
0.04911 |
138 |
103 |
27 |
8 |
721 |
Good news! One of us has reason to celebrate. |
1.3116 |
0.04911 |
138 |
103 |
27 |
8 |
722 |
Don't worry. I do this procedure hundreds of time a month. |
1.3113 |
0.04809 |
151 |
114 |
27 |
10 |
723 |
Don't worry, I feel very confident your 'lobottlemy' is going to go down smoothly. |
1.3113 |
0.04525 |
151 |
111 |
33 |
7 |
724 |
Nothing serious. Bit of gas easily fixed. |
1.3111 |
0.05201 |
135 |
103 |
22 |
10 |
725 |
You might feel a little pinch, but it's gonna feel so good to breathe again! |
1.3106 |
0.04944 |
132 |
98 |
27 |
7 |
726 |
Fortunately, your insurance should cover the corkage fee. |
1.3106 |
0.04825 |
132 |
97 |
29 |
6 |
727 |
Just a small poke and we'll drain off some of that fluid. |
1.3103 |
0.04746 |
145 |
108 |
29 |
8 |
728 |
This would be less invasive if you came in a screw top. |
1.3103 |
0.04540 |
145 |
106 |
33 |
6 |
729 |
Just a little pain, followed by an empty feeling. |
1.3103 |
0.05110 |
116 |
85 |
26 |
5 |
730 |
The good news is that I've removed hundreds of those and everyone feels better afterwards. |
1.3101 |
0.04570 |
158 |
118 |
31 |
9 |
731 |
yes, both literally as well as figuratively since with we no longer take your insurance. |
1.3097 |
0.05491 |
113 |
85 |
21 |
7 |
732 |
It may be a painful procedure, but you won't be able to breathe without it. |
1.3097 |
0.04537 |
155 |
115 |
32 |
8 |
733 |
You have aged really well. |
1.3095 |
0.04709 |
126 |
91 |
31 |
4 |
734 |
Once we pop that cork off, I’ll be able to see how you’re aging! |
1.3094 |
0.04433 |
139 |
100 |
35 |
4 |
735 |
After the procedure, I'm sure you'll be able to breathe easier. |
1.3094 |
0.04662 |
139 |
102 |
31 |
6 |
736 |
It’s a very normal procedure so please no wine-ing… |
1.3094 |
0.04433 |
139 |
100 |
35 |
4 |
737 |
If you want to breathe properly I'm going to have to perform an extraction. |
1.3089 |
0.04916 |
123 |
90 |
28 |
5 |
738 |
You’ll only feel a little pressure. |
1.3089 |
0.05049 |
123 |
91 |
26 |
6 |
739 |
Don't worry, I have just the thing to help you breathe |
1.3088 |
0.04491 |
136 |
98 |
34 |
4 |
740 |
I know you tend to keep things bottled up but you’ve reached maturity and it’s time to let it all out… |
1.3087 |
0.04939 |
149 |
114 |
24 |
11 |
741 |
Corkage fees are out-of pocket, I'm afraid. |
1.3087 |
0.04656 |
149 |
111 |
30 |
8 |
742 |
You'll feel a little drained, but I assure you we'll both feel much better. |
1.3087 |
0.04656 |
149 |
111 |
30 |
8 |
743 |
After a certain age it's practically mandatory. |
1.3087 |
0.04656 |
149 |
111 |
30 |
8 |
744 |
It's a proven great stress reliever... |
1.3084 |
0.05541 |
107 |
80 |
21 |
6 |
745 |
No, I am not using this to check your prostate. |
1.3084 |
0.06145 |
107 |
84 |
13 |
10 |
746 |
It's the drink talking |
1.3083 |
0.05525 |
120 |
92 |
19 |
9 |
747 |
Don't forget to breathe. |
1.3083 |
0.05139 |
133 |
101 |
23 |
9 |
748 |
The cork is always the first to go. |
1.3083 |
0.05027 |
133 |
100 |
25 |
8 |
749 |
We all stop aging eventually. |
1.3082 |
0.04617 |
146 |
108 |
31 |
7 |
750 |
No, actually you are the perfect age for this procedure |
1.3082 |
0.04718 |
146 |
109 |
29 |
8 |
751 |
Well, dear boy, it's the moment of truth...where we find out what you're made of! |
1.3077 |
0.04679 |
143 |
106 |
30 |
7 |
752 |
Yes, it is invasive, but it will clear up that blockage. |
1.3077 |
0.04741 |
130 |
95 |
30 |
5 |
753 |
This will only hurt for a second" |
1.3071 |
0.05159 |
140 |
108 |
21 |
11 |
754 |
I need to test your white wine cell count. |
1.3071 |
0.04851 |
140 |
105 |
27 |
8 |
755 |
I have good news… |
1.3071 |
0.04634 |
140 |
103 |
31 |
6 |
756 |
Well, has it been a good year? |
1.3071 |
0.04938 |
127 |
94 |
27 |
6 |
757 |
You're aging well. |
1.3070 |
0.04846 |
114 |
82 |
29 |
3 |
758 |
Don't worry, this won't hurt a bit . . . unless your cork is dry. |
1.3067 |
0.04819 |
150 |
114 |
26 |
10 |
759 |
bottoms up !! |
1.3066 |
0.05135 |
137 |
105 |
22 |
10 |
760 |
Don't worry, we go in from the top. |
1.3065 |
0.04746 |
124 |
90 |
30 |
4 |
761 |
The bad news is, based on your varietal, you won't age well.
The good news is that you're perfect right now. |
1.3063 |
0.05975 |
111 |
87 |
14 |
10 |
762 |
You want a second opinion before the extraction? Okay.
You’re wearing an ugly label. |
1.3063 |
0.05694 |
111 |
85 |
18 |
8 |
763 |
I'm sure you're fine! However, I'll require a quick sample for testing. |
1.3063 |
0.05399 |
111 |
83 |
22 |
6 |
764 |
Your test results came in. You're screwed! |
1.3060 |
0.04994 |
134 |
101 |
25 |
8 |
765 |
You'll breathe easier in no time! |
1.3060 |
0.04764 |
134 |
99 |
29 |
6 |
766 |
Good News - your insurance does cover cork extraction..... |
1.3060 |
0.05106 |
134 |
102 |
23 |
9 |
767 |
Who's ready for their detox? |
1.3060 |
0.04881 |
134 |
100 |
27 |
7 |
768 |
This should help you breathe. |
1.3058 |
0.05095 |
121 |
90 |
25 |
6 |
769 |
You will soon be able to breathe! |
1.3056 |
0.04546 |
144 |
106 |
32 |
6 |
770 |
Betcha wish you were a screwtop. |
1.3053 |
0.05185 |
131 |
100 |
22 |
9 |
771 |
The good news is that we can reduce your high pressure |
1.3051 |
0.05178 |
118 |
88 |
24 |
6 |
772 |
I want to try a decongestant. |
1.3051 |
0.05036 |
118 |
87 |
26 |
5 |
773 |
A little off the top?... |
1.3051 |
0.04890 |
118 |
86 |
28 |
4 |
774 |
This will be a little more difficult than a colonoscopy. |
1.3047 |
0.05384 |
128 |
99 |
19 |
10 |
775 |
What’s your vintage… I mean birthdate? |
1.3047 |
0.05268 |
128 |
98 |
21 |
9 |
776 |
Let's see if we can help you breathe. |
1.3046 |
0.04698 |
151 |
114 |
28 |
9 |
777 |
I have just the thing to help you unwind!" |
1.3043 |
0.04997 |
138 |
105 |
24 |
9 |
778 |
You will feel a slight pressure but no pain |
1.3043 |
0.05265 |
115 |
86 |
23 |
6 |
779 |
I think I can help you clear that blockage... |
1.3040 |
0.05233 |
125 |
95 |
22 |
8 |
780 |
It'll help you breathe. |
1.3040 |
0.05108 |
125 |
94 |
24 |
7 |
781 |
Just relax. I’m here to help you breathe. |
1.3040 |
0.05233 |
125 |
95 |
22 |
8 |
782 |
This procedure is the sure fire way to lose all the weight you’re carrying. |
1.3040 |
0.04980 |
125 |
93 |
26 |
6 |
783 |
We’ll, basically, you’re screwed if you do and screwed if you don’t! |
1.3038 |
0.05056 |
158 |
125 |
18 |
15 |
784 |
You can wine all you want, but we still have to do this. |
1.3038 |
0.04463 |
158 |
118 |
32 |
8 |
785 |
This will just pinch for a second. |
1.3037 |
0.04850 |
135 |
101 |
27 |
7 |
786 |
I think it's best if you get some air. |
1.3037 |
0.04495 |
135 |
98 |
33 |
4 |
787 |
This is my first case that fits one of my most enjoyable classes in Medical School......It is better to have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. |
1.3033 |
0.05807 |
122 |
97 |
13 |
12 |
788 |
Without this procedure you run the risk of becoming vinegar. |
1.3033 |
0.05320 |
122 |
93 |
21 |
8 |
789 |
It’s a little like a colonoscopy |
1.3033 |
0.05320 |
122 |
93 |
21 |
8 |
790 |
Don’t worry; I always pull out. |
1.3033 |
0.05689 |
122 |
96 |
15 |
11 |
791 |
Don’t be nervous, just sit back and breathe. |
1.3030 |
0.05037 |
132 |
100 |
24 |
8 |
792 |
It’ll be over in minutes and I won’t feel a thing! |
1.3030 |
0.04921 |
132 |
99 |
26 |
7 |
793 |
Don't worry.
I've done thousands of these. |
1.3028 |
0.04687 |
142 |
106 |
29 |
7 |
794 |
Good News!, We've found a match, a dry aged ribeye. |
1.3028 |
0.04996 |
142 |
109 |
23 |
10 |
795 |
You are healthy enough to drink! |
1.3028 |
0.05132 |
109 |
80 |
25 |
4 |
796 |
I'm about to fix your breathing issue. |
1.3026 |
0.04382 |
152 |
112 |
34 |
6 |
797 |
Trust me, this will help you breathe. |
1.3025 |
0.05277 |
119 |
90 |
22 |
7 |
798 |
Please. Dr. Sommelier was my fathers name |
1.3025 |
0.05141 |
119 |
89 |
24 |
6 |
799 |
Looks like we both need a shot |
1.3025 |
0.05668 |
119 |
93 |
16 |
10 |
800 |
You were born in a great year. I'll need an extra large sample. |
1.3023 |
0.04996 |
129 |
97 |
25 |
7 |
801 |
Are you sure there aren't any less invasive options we haven't explored yet, doc? |
1.3022 |
0.04860 |
139 |
105 |
26 |
8 |
802 |
You'll just feel a little pinch when I take the sample |
1.3022 |
0.04752 |
139 |
104 |
28 |
7 |
803 |
please no! I'm not aged yet! |
1.3019 |
0.05714 |
106 |
81 |
18 |
7 |
804 |
The procedure is relatively painless,and your vintage is covered by Medicare. |
1.3019 |
0.04615 |
159 |
121 |
28 |
10 |
805 |
You just need a bit of fresh air to get better. |
1.3019 |
0.05390 |
106 |
79 |
22 |
5 |
806 |
You've kept things bottled up too long. I'll help you let it all out. |
1.3016 |
0.05197 |
126 |
96 |
22 |
8 |
807 |
Let’s just take a little peek, shall we? |
1.3016 |
0.04817 |
126 |
93 |
28 |
5 |
808 |
You mustn’t bottle up your emotions. |
1.3016 |
0.04545 |
126 |
91 |
32 |
3 |
809 |
Don't worry -- this will just help you breathe better. |
1.3014 |
0.04798 |
146 |
111 |
26 |
9 |
810 |
Now we are going to play a little game to help you open up... |
1.3010 |
0.05661 |
103 |
78 |
19 |
6 |
811 |
I have something to relieve your headache... |
1.3009 |
0.05010 |
113 |
83 |
26 |
4 |
812 |
I’m just going to check your nose and your legs. |
1.3008 |
0.05529 |
123 |
96 |
17 |
10 |
813 |
Doc, why do you always schedule me at five o'clock? |
1.3008 |
0.05155 |
123 |
93 |
23 |
7 |
814 |
Two quick turns and I’ll do the taste, er, testing. |
1.3008 |
0.05441 |
133 |
105 |
16 |
12 |
815 |
Don't worry, your copay covers corkage. |
1.3008 |
0.05005 |
133 |
101 |
24 |
8 |
816 |
Just a tiny poke. |
1.3008 |
0.04526 |
133 |
97 |
32 |
4 |
817 |
We just need to do a few tastes, I mean tests |
1.3008 |
0.04889 |
133 |
100 |
26 |
7 |
818 |
What did you say your date of birth was? |
1.3000 |
0.05081 |
130 |
99 |
23 |
8 |
819 |
You’re at that age now |
1.3000 |
0.05081 |
130 |
99 |
23 |
8 |
820 |
You could save someone’s life with this donation. |
1.3000 |
0.05371 |
120 |
92 |
20 |
8 |
821 |
Well the good news is you don't have cancer, the bad news is I typically open a bottle of wine when I give that news... |
1.2993 |
0.04570 |
147 |
110 |
30 |
7 |
822 |
You won't feel a thing... and once I'm done with you, neither will I. |
1.2993 |
0.05146 |
147 |
116 |
18 |
13 |
823 |
I will be happy to examine you more closely after you breathe a while |
1.2993 |
0.04789 |
137 |
103 |
27 |
7 |
824 |
Don't worry you'll be able to breathe in a minute! |
1.2993 |
0.04900 |
137 |
104 |
25 |
8 |
825 |
Fear of needles? Well then, good news... |
1.2992 |
0.05281 |
127 |
98 |
20 |
9 |
826 |
Well, yes, today I am screwing with you. |
1.2992 |
0.05039 |
127 |
96 |
24 |
7 |
827 |
You're gonna feel a little trickle. |
1.2992 |
0.05161 |
127 |
97 |
22 |
8 |
828 |
We're just going to drain a little fluid. |
1.2991 |
0.05188 |
117 |
88 |
23 |
6 |
829 |
You came to the right person. |
1.2991 |
0.05188 |
117 |
88 |
23 |
6 |
830 |
This is the “ Stormy Daniels Procedure “ - takes less than 90 seconds and you won’t feel a thing. |
1.2991 |
0.05728 |
117 |
92 |
15 |
10 |
831 |
Ah.. You only 'think' you're a screw top! |
1.2991 |
0.04896 |
117 |
86 |
27 |
4 |
832 |
…don’t worry, I found a way for you to give blood after all..! |
1.2991 |
0.05044 |
117 |
87 |
25 |
5 |
833 |
Trust me, I'll just put in the tip. |
1.2991 |
0.05510 |
107 |
81 |
20 |
6 |
834 |
No, no! You are aging excellently! |
1.2985 |
0.04621 |
134 |
99 |
30 |
5 |
835 |
No sense in keeping everything bottled up inside. |
1.2984 |
0.04989 |
124 |
93 |
25 |
6 |
836 |
Yes, we can relieve that ‘full body’ feeling you’re experiencing. |
1.2984 |
0.05245 |
124 |
95 |
21 |
8 |
837 |
We may experience symptoms of dizziness or fatigue. |
1.2982 |
0.05421 |
114 |
87 |
20 |
7 |
838 |
I'd just like to help you relax and breathe |
1.2982 |
0.05127 |
114 |
85 |
24 |
5 |
839 |
This procedure will help you breathe. |
1.2982 |
0.05276 |
114 |
86 |
22 |
6 |
840 |
This procedure is very common for older bottles such as yourself. |
1.2982 |
0.05276 |
114 |
86 |
22 |
6 |
841 |
Oh, I can definitely cure you of that bottled up feeling. |
1.2982 |
0.04650 |
114 |
82 |
30 |
2 |
842 |
Medical humor. Actually, I'm going ice fishing tomorrow. |
1.2982 |
0.05276 |
114 |
86 |
22 |
6 |
843 |
Just to verify, how old are you again? |
1.2982 |
0.05276 |
114 |
86 |
22 |
6 |
844 |
At your age, it would be irresponsible not to |
1.2981 |
0.05778 |
104 |
80 |
17 |
7 |
845 |
As your doctor, I am here to serve you. |
1.2979 |
0.04473 |
141 |
104 |
32 |
5 |
846 |
I have just the thing to get you to open up. |
1.2977 |
0.04930 |
131 |
99 |
25 |
7 |
847 |
Well, yes. The procedure is somewhat invasive. |
1.2976 |
0.04184 |
168 |
125 |
36 |
7 |
848 |
I can assure you, at your age, it's a routine procedure" |
1.2975 |
0.05333 |
121 |
93 |
20 |
8 |
849 |
And the good news is your insurance covers the corkage fee. |
1.2975 |
0.04930 |
121 |
90 |
26 |
5 |
850 |
Now let's see if you're bone dry. |
1.2973 |
0.05519 |
111 |
85 |
19 |
7 |
851 |
For someone of your vintage, it's recommended every five years. |
1.2973 |
0.05214 |
111 |
83 |
23 |
5 |
852 |
Sorry, but it’s time to pull the plug. |
1.2971 |
0.04759 |
138 |
104 |
27 |
7 |
853 |
Now as you know, you’re over forty… |
1.2971 |
0.04869 |
138 |
105 |
25 |
8 |
854 |
I understand we’re getting a flute shot today? |
1.2971 |
0.04531 |
138 |
102 |
31 |
5 |
855 |
You'll feel a little pressure, nothing to whine about! |
1.2970 |
0.05367 |
101 |
75 |
22 |
4 |
856 |
I know just the thing to relieve your headaches. |
1.2969 |
0.04621 |
128 |
94 |
30 |
4 |
857 |
This won't hurt and it will help you breath. |
1.2969 |
0.04753 |
128 |
95 |
28 |
5 |
858 |
It's just a little something we have to do when you get to a certain age. |
1.2969 |
0.05245 |
128 |
99 |
20 |
9 |
859 |
I have excellent news, you’re just the right age for decanting! |
1.2969 |
0.04486 |
128 |
93 |
32 |
3 |
860 |
Would I screw you? |
1.2966 |
0.05150 |
118 |
89 |
23 |
6 |
861 |
Not to worry. I've dealt with lots of cases like yours over the years. |
1.2963 |
0.05773 |
108 |
84 |
16 |
8 |
862 |
I promise it is not a lobottlemy |
1.2963 |
0.05465 |
108 |
82 |
20 |
6 |
863 |
Wanna screw around? |
1.2963 |
0.06066 |
108 |
86 |
12 |
10 |
864 |
Don't worry, if anything goes wrong we'll use mouth to mouth respiration. |
1.2961 |
0.04652 |
152 |
116 |
27 |
9 |
865 |
I recommend this procedure for all patients of a certain vintage" |
1.2961 |
0.04558 |
152 |
115 |
29 |
8 |
866 |
Now, breathe… |
1.2960 |
0.04955 |
125 |
94 |
25 |
6 |
867 |
The nurse will be back in a moment with your test results and a decanter |
1.2958 |
0.04771 |
142 |
108 |
26 |
8 |
868 |
You'll feel a small release of pressure, and then just breathe. |
1.2957 |
0.05236 |
115 |
87 |
22 |
6 |
869 |
Me? No! It's the insurance companies that will screw you over! |
1.2957 |
0.05657 |
115 |
90 |
16 |
9 |
870 |
It’s a vintage procedure |
1.2955 |
0.04778 |
132 |
99 |
27 |
6 |
871 |
You are at the age where we need to do this. |
1.2952 |
0.05567 |
105 |
80 |
19 |
6 |
872 |
I promise this will help you breathe normally. |
1.2951 |
0.05165 |
122 |
93 |
22 |
7 |
873 |
Yes, well, we'll see just how well you've really aged. |
1.2951 |
0.05294 |
122 |
94 |
20 |
8 |
874 |
It’s nothing to be ashamed about, but we have to remove the blockage. |
1.2951 |
0.04895 |
122 |
91 |
26 |
5 |
875 |
On the bright side, you're aging beautifully |
1.2951 |
0.04755 |
122 |
90 |
28 |
4 |
876 |
Wouldn’t it be nice to just breathe for a while? |
1.2946 |
0.05621 |
112 |
87 |
17 |
8 |
877 |
So, I heard it through the grapevine you're not feeling well. |
1.2946 |
0.04848 |
129 |
97 |
26 |
6 |
878 |
It'll just be a little prick. |
1.2946 |
0.05209 |
129 |
100 |
20 |
9 |
879 |
Happiness is not out there. It's inside you.
Here, let me show you. |
1.2946 |
0.05437 |
129 |
102 |
16 |
11 |
880 |
I have a new therapeutic technique that will help you open up. |
1.2946 |
0.05092 |
129 |
99 |
22 |
8 |
881 |
Once I help you breathe you’ll mellow out. |
1.2946 |
0.05092 |
129 |
99 |
22 |
8 |
882 |
It’ll hurt a little. Then we’ll let you breathe. |
1.2941 |
0.04971 |
119 |
89 |
25 |
5 |
883 |
You’re going to hear a “pop” |
1.2941 |
0.05250 |
119 |
91 |
21 |
7 |
884 |
I have a little something to take the pressure off. |
1.2941 |
0.05250 |
119 |
91 |
21 |
7 |
885 |
I’m just going to do a little something to help you breathe. |
1.2941 |
0.05843 |
102 |
79 |
16 |
7 |
886 |
Good news: you're insurance company is covering the corkage fee. |
1.2941 |
0.05113 |
119 |
90 |
23 |
6 |
887 |
you're just ging to feel a little prick |
1.2941 |
0.05018 |
136 |
105 |
22 |
9 |
888 |
The extraction will be painless. |
1.2941 |
0.04971 |
119 |
89 |
25 |
5 |
889 |
The next test will tell me how well you're aging. |
1.2941 |
0.05501 |
102 |
77 |
20 |
5 |
890 |
Screw who? |
1.2941 |
0.05675 |
102 |
78 |
18 |
6 |
891 |
Once we remove it, we let you breathe for a few minutes |
1.2937 |
0.05528 |
126 |
100 |
15 |
11 |
892 |
Just a minor procedure to help you breathe. |
1.2937 |
0.04790 |
126 |
94 |
27 |
5 |
893 |
Your best qualities have been bottled up for too long. |
1.2937 |
0.04921 |
126 |
95 |
25 |
6 |
894 |
Once I release those nasty sulfites, your headaches will magically disappear. |
1.2937 |
0.04790 |
126 |
94 |
27 |
5 |
895 |
I'll just need you to scooch down a little bit more. |
1.2937 |
0.05294 |
126 |
98 |
19 |
9 |
896 |
I know it sounds scary, but this procedure will give you legs AND let you breathe. |
1.2936 |
0.05263 |
109 |
82 |
22 |
5 |
897 |
Life is a Cabernet, old chum..It's only a Cabernet... |
1.2936 |
0.05727 |
109 |
85 |
16 |
8 |
898 |
You may very well be screwed now, but at least afterward you'll be able to breathe |
1.2934 |
0.04753 |
167 |
132 |
21 |
14 |
899 |
Don’t worry, you will breathe so much better. |
1.2932 |
0.05205 |
133 |
104 |
19 |
10 |
900 |
You'll just feel a little pinch |
1.2931 |
0.05340 |
116 |
89 |
20 |
7 |
901 |
No worries, we have a solution to your breathing problem. |
1.2931 |
0.05051 |
116 |
87 |
24 |
5 |
902 |
I'm not strictly an optometrist but I AM here to get you into some glasses |
1.2931 |
0.05197 |
116 |
88 |
22 |
6 |
903 |
When were you bottled, again? |
1.2929 |
0.05607 |
99 |
75 |
19 |
5 |
904 |
What say we introduce you to some fresh air? |
1.2929 |
0.05607 |
99 |
75 |
19 |
5 |
905 |
I call it a 'corkonoscopy'. |
1.2929 |
0.06300 |
99 |
79 |
11 |
9 |
906 |
Trust me, it'll help you breathe. |
1.2929 |
0.05788 |
99 |
76 |
17 |
6 |
907 |
I would like to keep you here overnight for observation, and possibly some samples" |
1.2929 |
0.05420 |
99 |
74 |
21 |
4 |
908 |
Don't worry, this is gonna hurt me more than it's gonna hurt you |
1.2929 |
0.05788 |
99 |
76 |
17 |
6 |
909 |
The next procedure will be performed in the staff room. |
1.2927 |
0.04861 |
123 |
92 |
26 |
5 |
910 |
The good news is, you have aged well. |
1.2927 |
0.04861 |
123 |
92 |
26 |
5 |
911 |
You need to breathe. |
1.2927 |
0.05128 |
123 |
94 |
22 |
7 |
912 |
actually, this MIGHT hurt you more than it hurts me... |
1.2923 |
0.04816 |
130 |
98 |
26 |
6 |
913 |
We're just going to let you breathe. |
1.2920 |
0.05134 |
113 |
85 |
23 |
5 |
914 |
The surgeon agrees, we have to open you up! |
1.2920 |
0.05286 |
113 |
86 |
21 |
6 |
915 |
I’m not screwing you. I’m unleashing your potential. |
1.2920 |
0.05577 |
113 |
88 |
17 |
8 |
916 |
Great news! With your insurance there's no corkage fee! |
1.2917 |
0.05212 |
120 |
92 |
21 |
7 |
917 |
Your procedure isn't scheduled until five o'clock, but you know what they say |
1.2917 |
0.05474 |
120 |
94 |
17 |
9 |
918 |
Are you the one who wants a screw top? |
1.2913 |
0.05137 |
127 |
98 |
21 |
8 |
919 |
It's just a little something to help you breathe. |
1.2913 |
0.05374 |
127 |
100 |
17 |
10 |
920 |
The only way to get the answer is to open you up. |
1.2913 |
0.05013 |
127 |
97 |
23 |
7 |
921 |
It’s a common procedure. You’ll only feel a little poke. |
1.2910 |
0.04345 |
134 |
98 |
33 |
3 |
922 |
I have a special tool to help with your fluid retention |
1.2910 |
0.04949 |
134 |
103 |
23 |
8 |
923 |
This isn't easy to say, but we need a tasting... er, sample |
1.2909 |
0.05681 |
110 |
86 |
16 |
8 |
924 |
Don’t worry this is our most reliable anti-aging procedure |
1.2909 |
0.05826 |
110 |
87 |
14 |
9 |
925 |
Let's check your tannins, shall we? |
1.2906 |
0.04865 |
117 |
87 |
26 |
4 |
926 |
I know just the thing to help you breathe. |
1.2906 |
0.05159 |
117 |
89 |
22 |
6 |
927 |
Turn your head to the side for me and cough |
1.2906 |
0.05014 |
117 |
88 |
24 |
5 |
928 |
After this procedure you may feel a little light-headed, but that'll make two of us. |
1.2903 |
0.05092 |
124 |
95 |
22 |
7 |
929 |
I'm going to need you to bend over. |
1.2901 |
0.04905 |
131 |
100 |
24 |
7 |
930 |
No need to fret…I haven’t lost a cork since the ‘87 Gewürztraminer. |
1.2897 |
0.05313 |
107 |
81 |
21 |
5 |
931 |
I see you're a 40 year old vintage. |
1.2895 |
0.04941 |
114 |
85 |
25 |
4 |
932 |
This is the only one covered by your plan. |
1.2895 |
0.05534 |
114 |
89 |
17 |
8 |
933 |
You need to open up. |
1.2893 |
0.04901 |
121 |
91 |
25 |
5 |
934 |
Technically, it's not a lobotomy. |
1.2893 |
0.04901 |
121 |
91 |
25 |
5 |
935 |
So, I have a treatment that will help you breath. |
1.2893 |
0.04758 |
121 |
90 |
27 |
4 |
936 |
Which end ? |
1.2893 |
0.05174 |
121 |
93 |
21 |
7 |
937 |
I think I have something to release all that pressure you have...well, bottled up. |
1.2893 |
0.05174 |
121 |
93 |
21 |
7 |
938 |
I need a second opinion. |
1.2893 |
0.05040 |
121 |
92 |
23 |
6 |
939 |
Don't look so worried. I'm just here to help you breathe. |
1.2891 |
0.05221 |
128 |
100 |
19 |
9 |
940 |
Colonoscopy? Couldn't be simpler. |
1.2891 |
0.05101 |
128 |
99 |
21 |
8 |
941 |
Did I say ‘frontal lobottlemy?’ Talk about a Freudian slip! |
1.2891 |
0.05451 |
128 |
102 |
15 |
11 |
942 |
The uncorking may sting a bit, but the decanting is painless. |
1.2889 |
0.04567 |
135 |
101 |
29 |
5 |
943 |
Why not change that tight corked feeling for one of an expressive high note, with legs? |
1.2887 |
0.05475 |
97 |
73 |
20 |
4 |
944 |
At twenty you were just another full bodied red. At seventy, you're exquisite. |
1.2885 |
0.05744 |
104 |
81 |
16 |
7 |
945 |
You'll be breathing freely in no time! |
1.2885 |
0.05234 |
104 |
78 |
22 |
4 |
946 |
We have ways to make you open up. |
1.2885 |
0.05579 |
104 |
80 |
18 |
6 |
947 |
Trust me. You'll breathe better." |
1.2885 |
0.05579 |
104 |
80 |
18 |
6 |
948 |
This procedure is my suggested weight loss plan for you. |
1.2883 |
0.05337 |
111 |
85 |
20 |
6 |
949 |
So, you wanted to discuss some concerns about aging? |
1.2883 |
0.05181 |
111 |
84 |
22 |
5 |
950 |
It's similar to a lobotomy, but it's called an 'Unbottleme' |
1.2883 |
0.05181 |
111 |
84 |
22 |
5 |
951 |
You are now a 50 year old vintage , so it's time for your Corkorectomy |
1.2883 |
0.05488 |
111 |
86 |
18 |
7 |
952 |
You just got the nod from upstairs. |
1.2881 |
0.05260 |
118 |
91 |
20 |
7 |
953 |
A wine your age really should have this done every five years. |
1.2880 |
0.04795 |
125 |
94 |
26 |
5 |
954 |
The donor registry identified you as a perfect match with pork. |
1.2879 |
0.04873 |
132 |
101 |
24 |
7 |
955 |
You'll feel a little sting and a little pressure. |
1.2879 |
0.05105 |
132 |
103 |
20 |
9 |
956 |
The bottle in front of me needs a frontal lobotomy. |
1.2872 |
0.05784 |
94 |
72 |
17 |
5 |
957 |
I'm afraid it's your time. |
1.2871 |
0.05139 |
101 |
75 |
23 |
3 |
958 |
It's a simple procedure that will make it much easier for you breathe. |
1.2871 |
0.05688 |
101 |
78 |
17 |
6 |
959 |
It’s a kind of twist on the usual blood sample. |
1.2871 |
0.05139 |
101 |
75 |
23 |
3 |
960 |
It's like taking off a tight shoe...and then you can breathe. |
1.2870 |
0.05432 |
108 |
83 |
19 |
6 |
961 |
Don't worry, you'll be breathing in no time. |
1.2870 |
0.05104 |
108 |
81 |
23 |
4 |
962 |
No worries - it's an age-old procedure to help you breathe. |
1.2870 |
0.05104 |
108 |
81 |
23 |
4 |
963 |
Don't worry. I've done this removal procedure a thousand times. |
1.2870 |
0.04753 |
108 |
79 |
27 |
2 |
964 |
This will ease the pressure for both of us. |
1.2870 |
0.04904 |
115 |
86 |
25 |
4 |
965 |
Not gonna lie. Your time is up. |
1.2870 |
0.05057 |
115 |
87 |
23 |
5 |
966 |
We're going to need a specimen. |
1.2870 |
0.05628 |
115 |
91 |
15 |
9 |
967 |
This will help you breathe more easily. |
1.2870 |
0.04746 |
115 |
85 |
27 |
3 |
968 |
We'll have that thing out in a jiffy,and then you'll be able to breathe. |
1.2870 |
0.05206 |
115 |
88 |
21 |
6 |
969 |
Basically, you're screwed. |
1.2869 |
0.05267 |
122 |
95 |
19 |
8 |
970 |
Now now, you shouldn't be afraid of this at your age! |
1.2869 |
0.04866 |
122 |
92 |
25 |
5 |
971 |
Trust me, they’re all switching to the screw cap. |
1.2869 |
0.05004 |
122 |
93 |
23 |
6 |
972 |
Well Mr. Pinot, your results came back and everything looks grape" |
1.2868 |
0.05185 |
129 |
101 |
19 |
9 |
973 |
"Trust me, you'll finally be able to breathe. |
1.2868 |
0.04564 |
129 |
96 |
29 |
4 |
974 |
This guy’s gonna screw me… |
1.2868 |
0.04657 |
136 |
103 |
27 |
6 |
975 |
Well the good news is your plan covers corkage with no deductible or co-pay. |
1.2867 |
0.04471 |
150 |
114 |
29 |
7 |
976 |
But enough bad news. I understand you signed a donor card ... |
1.2857 |
0.04982 |
112 |
84 |
24 |
4 |
977 |
Normally the patient whines during the procedure and I wine after... |
1.2857 |
0.05696 |
105 |
82 |
16 |
7 |
978 |
Trouble breathing? |
1.2857 |
0.05141 |
112 |
85 |
22 |
5 |
979 |
Yes, you are about to get screwed! |
1.2857 |
0.05222 |
119 |
92 |
20 |
7 |
980 |
You're tense. I have something that will open you up a bit. |
1.2857 |
0.05012 |
105 |
78 |
24 |
3 |
981 |
Is this your first time donating wine? |
1.2857 |
0.04677 |
140 |
107 |
26 |
7 |
982 |
Don’t worry. You don’t have to turn around and bend over this time. |
1.2857 |
0.04957 |
133 |
103 |
22 |
8 |
983 |
Can you believe it’s been five years already? |
1.2857 |
0.05083 |
119 |
91 |
22 |
6 |
984 |
I only have to draw one glass. |
1.2857 |
0.05445 |
112 |
87 |
18 |
7 |
985 |
You'll be breathing easy in just moment. |
1.2857 |
0.04677 |
140 |
107 |
26 |
7 |
986 |
You're a little immature, nice nose but no legs |
1.2857 |
0.05855 |
105 |
83 |
14 |
8 |
987 |
What makes you think I'm just thirsty? |
1.2857 |
0.05427 |
98 |
74 |
20 |
4 |
988 |
It's a novel way to stop aging" |
1.2857 |
0.05981 |
98 |
77 |
14 |
7 |
989 |
Trust me, it's not as bad as a prostate exam. |
1.2857 |
0.05268 |
126 |
99 |
18 |
9 |
990 |
Now you know why you should always ask for a female doctor. |
1.2857 |
0.05981 |
98 |
77 |
14 |
7 |
991 |
This may seem a little.. uh, invasive, but you’ll be able to breathe better. |
1.2857 |
0.04677 |
140 |
107 |
26 |
7 |
992 |
We’ll need to drain the fluids before proceeding |
1.2857 |
0.04982 |
112 |
84 |
24 |
4 |
993 |
Unfortunately, the corkage fee is not covered by your insurance |
1.2857 |
0.05191 |
105 |
79 |
22 |
4 |
994 |
I’ll give you another hint: it’s bigger than a stethoscope. |
1.2847 |
0.04389 |
137 |
102 |
31 |
4 |
995 |
Is this your first time donating in Napa Valley? |
1.2846 |
0.04663 |
130 |
98 |
27 |
5 |
996 |
I'm afraid this isn't going to be a very good year for you. |
1.2846 |
0.04912 |
130 |
100 |
23 |
7 |
997 |
I’m the opposite of your insurance company – I’m here to unscrew you. |
1.2846 |
0.05101 |
123 |
95 |
21 |
7 |
998 |
I'll need a blood sample large enough for our staff Happy Hour." |
1.2846 |
0.05230 |
123 |
96 |
19 |
8 |
999 |
This won't hurt a bit, we just need to drain some fluid. |
1.2845 |
0.04868 |
116 |
87 |
25 |
4 |
1000 |
I promise. You will feel better after a few quick turns. |
1.2845 |
0.04711 |
116 |
86 |
27 |
3 |
1001 |
You're at risk of being caught in a downward spiral. Trust me. |
1.2845 |
0.04868 |
116 |
87 |
25 |
4 |
1002 |
So, your date of birth is 1945? |
1.2843 |
0.05464 |
102 |
78 |
19 |
5 |
1003 |
We need to talk about your blood pressure |
1.2843 |
0.05639 |
102 |
79 |
17 |
6 |
1004 |
Okay now, I’m just going to need you to breathe. |
1.2843 |
0.05283 |
102 |
77 |
21 |
4 |
1005 |
Look, you're 50 years old, it really is time to get screened. |
1.2837 |
0.04965 |
141 |
111 |
20 |
10 |
1006 |
Wait, I already had my colonoscopy. |
1.2836 |
0.04691 |
134 |
102 |
26 |
6 |
1007 |
I hear you are feeling stopped up. |
1.2836 |
0.04691 |
134 |
102 |
26 |
6 |
1008 |
You'll feel awful. But I'll feel amazing. |
1.2835 |
0.04730 |
127 |
96 |
26 |
5 |
1009 |
It's just to loosen you up. |
1.2835 |
0.04860 |
127 |
97 |
24 |
6 |
1010 |
Yes, this exact procedure, hundreds of times. And no, haven't touched a bottle in a week. |
1.2835 |
0.04458 |
127 |
94 |
30 |
3 |
1011 |
First, I am going to open you, so you can breathe properly. Failing that, I’ll have to perform mouth-to-mouth. |
1.2835 |
0.05232 |
127 |
100 |
18 |
9 |
1012 |
Your tests show that you've been keeping things bottled up to long. |
1.2833 |
0.05046 |
120 |
92 |
22 |
6 |
1013 |
Let's just relieve some of that pressure, shall we? |
1.2833 |
0.04906 |
120 |
91 |
24 |
5 |
1014 |
You'll feel a small sting, then I'll feel a pleasant buzz. |
1.2833 |
0.05317 |
120 |
94 |
18 |
8 |
1015 |
Alternatively, we could lay you to rest in a cold dark place, deep underground for ages - even then, there's no guarantee you'll get any better. |
1.2833 |
0.05046 |
120 |
92 |
22 |
6 |
1016 |
I hope I won't be too much of a pain in the neck. |
1.2832 |
0.04944 |
113 |
85 |
24 |
4 |
1017 |
Could you spin around and let me see your label again? |
1.2832 |
0.04944 |
113 |
85 |
24 |
4 |
1018 |
You will only feel a small prick. |
1.2832 |
0.05102 |
113 |
86 |
22 |
5 |
1019 |
I'll have you breathing easier in a minute. |
1.2832 |
0.05547 |
113 |
89 |
16 |
8 |
1020 |
Before I can get to the bottom of this, you're going to need to breathe. |
1.2832 |
0.05254 |
113 |
87 |
20 |
6 |
1021 |
Yes, at your age this procedure is recommended |
1.2832 |
0.05402 |
113 |
88 |
18 |
7 |
1022 |
At your age, this procedure is recommended. |
1.2832 |
0.04782 |
113 |
84 |
26 |
3 |
1023 |
The good news is that you are fine, very very fine. |
1.2832 |
0.04782 |
113 |
84 |
26 |
3 |
1024 |
I'm going to conduct a full-bodied exam. |
1.2830 |
0.05321 |
106 |
81 |
20 |
5 |
1025 |
I have a solution to your feeling bloated! |
1.2828 |
0.05927 |
99 |
78 |
14 |
7 |
1026 |
Say cheese |
1.2824 |
0.04633 |
131 |
99 |
27 |
5 |
1027 |
Sorry, but we can't use anesthesia in your case. It might bruise the wine. |
1.2824 |
0.04633 |
131 |
99 |
27 |
5 |
1028 |
Reverse order today, screw first then drink |
1.2823 |
0.04799 |
124 |
94 |
25 |
5 |
1029 |
Now, now, there’s nothing to fear. I’m just going to help you breathe a little bit. |
1.2823 |
0.04799 |
124 |
94 |
25 |
5 |
1030 |
Your treatment plan includes plenty of bread and cheese. |
1.2823 |
0.04799 |
124 |
94 |
25 |
5 |
1031 |
After the procedure we offer complimentary cheese and crackers. |
1.2821 |
0.05270 |
117 |
91 |
19 |
7 |
1032 |
I think we have a solution for your weight problem. |
1.2821 |
0.05128 |
117 |
90 |
21 |
6 |
1033 |
Trust me, I want nothing more than to help you breathe. |
1.2821 |
0.05128 |
117 |
90 |
21 |
6 |
1034 |
So I hear you've been bottled up for awhile." |
1.2818 |
0.05346 |
110 |
85 |
19 |
6 |
1035 |
Now I want you to breathe. |
1.2818 |
0.04855 |
110 |
82 |
25 |
3 |
1036 |
Now, let's see if we can get to the bottom of your problem. |
1.2817 |
0.04283 |
142 |
106 |
32 |
4 |
1037 |
Prepare to be screwed |
1.2816 |
0.05758 |
103 |
81 |
15 |
7 |
1038 |
Just one more step, and you will be able to breathe like never before. |
1.2812 |
0.04953 |
128 |
99 |
22 |
7 |
1039 |
Don't worry, these changes are common at your age. |
1.2812 |
0.04698 |
128 |
97 |
26 |
5 |
1040 |
I noticed on your intake form that you were born in 1926 in Bordeaux! |
1.2812 |
0.05075 |
128 |
100 |
20 |
8 |
1041 |
Draining blockages is my specialty. |
1.2812 |
0.04565 |
128 |
96 |
28 |
4 |
1042 |
It will only hurt for a second and then at last you will be able to breathe. |
1.2812 |
0.04953 |
128 |
99 |
22 |
7 |
1043 |
You can't keep things bottled up. |
1.2810 |
0.04871 |
121 |
92 |
24 |
5 |
1044 |
It's a very common procedure at your vintage. |
1.2807 |
0.04907 |
114 |
86 |
24 |
4 |
1045 |
After the blockage is removed, I should be feeling much better. |
1.2807 |
0.05214 |
114 |
88 |
20 |
6 |
1046 |
Dont worry this one doesn't go down there |
1.2807 |
0.04907 |
114 |
86 |
24 |
4 |
1047 |
Relax, we just need 8 ounces. |
1.2807 |
0.05214 |
114 |
88 |
20 |
6 |
1048 |
You've appropriately aged! Now is the time for your colonoscopy. |
1.2807 |
0.05063 |
114 |
87 |
22 |
5 |
1049 |
I think I have found a cure. |
1.2807 |
0.05063 |
114 |
87 |
22 |
5 |
1050 |
Think how much longer you lasted than the Beaujolais nouveau! |
1.2806 |
0.04793 |
139 |
108 |
23 |
8 |
1051 |
Bet you're sorry you are not a screwtop now! |
1.2804 |
0.05442 |
107 |
83 |
18 |
6 |
1052 |
So what’s this about you feeling all stopped up ? |
1.2803 |
0.04602 |
132 |
100 |
27 |
5 |
1053 |
Relax, this procedure will allow you to finally breathe |
1.2803 |
0.04602 |
132 |
100 |
27 |
5 |
1054 |
You are ready to be uncorked, my friend. |
1.2800 |
0.05140 |
100 |
75 |
22 |
3 |
1055 |
Simple procedure? Sounds pretty invasive. |
1.2800 |
0.04628 |
125 |
94 |
27 |
4 |
1056 |
Don't worry. We perform this procedure regularly |
1.2800 |
0.04765 |
125 |
95 |
25 |
5 |
1057 |
Now, let's have a look at that cork of yours." |
1.2800 |
0.05140 |
100 |
75 |
22 |
3 |
1058 |
I’ve learned that it’s not good to keep things bottled up. |
1.2797 |
0.05090 |
118 |
91 |
21 |
6 |
1059 |
You have aged well - up to now. |
1.2797 |
0.05231 |
118 |
92 |
19 |
7 |
1060 |
You'll feel much better when I help you to breath... |
1.2797 |
0.04797 |
118 |
89 |
25 |
4 |
1061 |
I’ve come to celebrate our tenth anniversary together. |
1.2797 |
0.04946 |
118 |
90 |
23 |
5 |
1062 |
Lastly, we just need to do a check of your vintage. |
1.2797 |
0.04797 |
118 |
89 |
25 |
4 |
1063 |
I'll respect you even more in the morning, but, yes, you are going to be screwed. |
1.2796 |
0.06185 |
93 |
74 |
12 |
7 |
1064 |
Now I will perform a frontal labottlemy. |
1.2793 |
0.05456 |
111 |
87 |
17 |
7 |
1065 |
You should see what we use for a routine pap smear |
1.2793 |
0.05303 |
111 |
86 |
19 |
6 |
1066 |
Don’t worry, this is a common procedure for bottles of your vintage. |
1.2793 |
0.04985 |
111 |
84 |
23 |
4 |
1067 |
You'll feel a little poke. |
1.2791 |
0.04794 |
129 |
99 |
24 |
6 |
1068 |
I WAS JUST THINKING, WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY TO GET SOME AIR AND BREATHE! |
1.2791 |
0.04794 |
129 |
99 |
24 |
6 |
1069 |
Don't worry, in med school we practiced this procedure every day. |
1.2788 |
0.05709 |
104 |
82 |
15 |
7 |
1070 |
I have the solution for all your problems." |
1.2788 |
0.05372 |
104 |
80 |
19 |
5 |
1071 |
Let me relieve that pressure for you. |
1.2788 |
0.05195 |
104 |
79 |
21 |
4 |
1072 |
This should help you breathe a little easier. |
1.2787 |
0.05367 |
122 |
97 |
16 |
9 |
1073 |
We just need to open your mind. |
1.2787 |
0.04836 |
122 |
93 |
24 |
5 |
1074 |
I need to let you breathe a little because you’ve been a bit corky lately. |
1.2787 |
0.04974 |
122 |
94 |
22 |
6 |
1075 |
It will hurt a lot less coming out… |
1.2787 |
0.04974 |
122 |
94 |
22 |
6 |
1076 |
It's a simple procedure. When you wake up in recovery, just focus on breathing. |
1.2786 |
0.04309 |
140 |
105 |
31 |
4 |
1077 |
You look like you're having a little trouble breathing... |
1.2784 |
0.05231 |
97 |
73 |
21 |
3 |
1078 |
Now, let's get rid of that sinus pressure once and for all |
1.2784 |
0.05997 |
97 |
77 |
13 |
7 |
1079 |
In a minute I'll need you to breath deep. |
1.2783 |
0.04870 |
115 |
87 |
24 |
4 |
1080 |
You've reached that age where I really have to do this. |
1.2783 |
0.05174 |
115 |
89 |
20 |
6 |
1081 |
It depends...what are you serving? |
1.2782 |
0.04182 |
133 |
98 |
33 |
2 |
1082 |
Don't worry, we go in through your groin. |
1.2778 |
0.06326 |
90 |
72 |
11 |
7 |
1083 |
Let's have a look up top |
1.2778 |
0.05235 |
108 |
83 |
20 |
5 |
1084 |
I have a new treatment to relieve the pressure you have been complaining about..... |
1.2778 |
0.04994 |
126 |
98 |
21 |
7 |
1085 |
Don't be silly. Your fear of doctors is completely irrational. |
1.2778 |
0.05067 |
108 |
82 |
22 |
4 |
1086 |
You simply need a few deep breaths. |
1.2778 |
0.04893 |
108 |
81 |
24 |
3 |
1087 |
I have some bad news, but let's have a drink first ! |
1.2778 |
0.04893 |
108 |
81 |
24 |
3 |
1088 |
Don’t be embarrassed. I’ve removed things far stranger than a cork. |
1.2778 |
0.05703 |
90 |
69 |
17 |
4 |
1089 |
One of the disadvantages of 50 year aging. |
1.2778 |
0.05703 |
90 |
69 |
17 |
4 |
1090 |
You have nothing to worry about. I've performed thousands of these procedures. |
1.2778 |
0.05859 |
108 |
87 |
12 |
9 |
1091 |
No, I wouldn't describe it as an invasive procedure... |
1.2778 |
0.05480 |
90 |
68 |
19 |
3 |
1092 |
Don't worry, you're aging quite nicely. |
1.2772 |
0.04899 |
101 |
75 |
24 |
2 |
1093 |
Look, we just need to take a peek inside and make sure you're aging properly... |
1.2772 |
0.05990 |
101 |
81 |
12 |
8 |
1094 |
Unfortunately your insurer doesn’t cover corkage… |
1.2772 |
0.05288 |
101 |
77 |
20 |
4 |
1095 |
I'm here to improve my bedside manner. |
1.2772 |
0.05472 |
101 |
78 |
18 |
5 |
1096 |
I know you’re nervous, but I need you to breathe. |
1.2772 |
0.05650 |
101 |
79 |
16 |
6 |
1097 |
We just need to check your levels of Oak and Tannins. |
1.2769 |
0.04505 |
130 |
98 |
28 |
4 |
1098 |
Don't worry after your decanting both of us will feel better! |
1.2768 |
0.05107 |
112 |
86 |
21 |
5 |
1099 |
Looks like you're due for an oxidation. You'll feel a small stick then some pressure. |
1.2768 |
0.05107 |
112 |
86 |
21 |
5 |
1100 |
Nothing. |
1.2768 |
0.05262 |
112 |
87 |
19 |
6 |
1101 |
Don't worry, it's only a little prick. |
1.2768 |
0.05262 |
112 |
87 |
19 |
6 |
1102 |
I am only here to serve you. |
1.2768 |
0.05262 |
112 |
87 |
19 |
6 |
1103 |
I promise that your donation will be going to a good cause. |
1.2768 |
0.04947 |
112 |
85 |
23 |
4 |
1104 |
No you didn't. You didn't see anything behind my back. |
1.2768 |
0.04610 |
112 |
83 |
27 |
2 |
1105 |
This is a very routine procedure for men your vintage |
1.2768 |
0.05107 |
112 |
86 |
21 |
5 |
1106 |
This will help with your flow. |
1.2766 |
0.05936 |
94 |
74 |
14 |
6 |
1107 |
A little fresh air will do you good. |
1.2764 |
0.04939 |
123 |
95 |
22 |
6 |
1108 |
I saw on your chart you were born in 1976...good year. |
1.2762 |
0.05152 |
105 |
80 |
21 |
4 |
1109 |
Today we will be checking your real age. |
1.2761 |
0.04665 |
134 |
103 |
25 |
6 |
1110 |
I'm seeing a plate of fava beans after you. |
1.2759 |
0.04987 |
116 |
89 |
22 |
5 |
1111 |
You can relax. I've done this procedure hundreds of times. |
1.2759 |
0.05135 |
116 |
90 |
20 |
6 |
1112 |
I see your chart says you were born in 1959, Mr. Rothschild? |
1.2759 |
0.05279 |
116 |
91 |
18 |
7 |
1113 |
You may feel a little discomfort. |
1.2759 |
0.04429 |
145 |
111 |
28 |
6 |
1114 |
Just sip back and relax |
1.2759 |
0.04987 |
116 |
89 |
22 |
5 |
1115 |
I’m guessing that your superiority complex regarding screw-cap bottles is dissipating as we speak. |
1.2756 |
0.05084 |
127 |
100 |
19 |
8 |
1116 |
I know you're appellation controle'e, but here in California the law is just a tad different. |
1.2756 |
0.04959 |
127 |
99 |
21 |
7 |
1117 |
It is an invasive procedure, but you have no need to worry. It’s routine for me. |
1.2756 |
0.04832 |
127 |
98 |
23 |
6 |
1118 |
My nurse tells me your worried your insurance won't cover corkage? |
1.2755 |
0.05385 |
98 |
75 |
19 |
4 |
1119 |
I’m here to screw you! |
1.2755 |
0.05577 |
98 |
76 |
17 |
5 |
1120 |
Nooo, it goes right in. |
1.2755 |
0.05762 |
98 |
77 |
15 |
6 |
1121 |
Don’t wine, no shots today. |
1.2755 |
0.05186 |
98 |
74 |
21 |
3 |
1122 |
No, I mean literally. |
1.2752 |
0.05193 |
109 |
84 |
20 |
5 |
1123 |
There's no cure for getting old, but you're the perfect age for something |
1.2752 |
0.05027 |
109 |
83 |
22 |
4 |
1124 |
Now we just need a blood draw to taste, I mean test your fluids. |
1.2752 |
0.05027 |
109 |
83 |
22 |
4 |
1125 |
Your insurance doesn’t cover the automatic. |
1.2752 |
0.05193 |
109 |
84 |
20 |
5 |
1126 |
Ya know, a twist-off would be much less painful! |
1.2750 |
0.04874 |
120 |
92 |
23 |
5 |
1127 |
Time to open up! |
1.2750 |
0.04874 |
120 |
92 |
23 |
5 |
1128 |
All vintages over fifty need to have this done once a year. |
1.2748 |
0.04853 |
131 |
102 |
22 |
7 |
1129 |
Lobotomy is your best option and it has the lowest deductible |
1.2746 |
0.04703 |
142 |
111 |
23 |
8 |
1130 |
Since therapy hasn’t helped you open up, we’re going to try a more direct approach. |
1.2746 |
0.04911 |
142 |
113 |
19 |
10 |
1131 |
After this we'll have a drink and everything will be fine. |
1.2745 |
0.04858 |
102 |
76 |
24 |
2 |
1132 |
The only side effect is a feeling of emptiness. |
1.2742 |
0.05164 |
124 |
98 |
18 |
8 |
1133 |
It was at this moment the Screw-Cap wine decided to seek a second opinion |
1.2742 |
0.05290 |
124 |
99 |
16 |
9 |
1134 |
You just breathe and let me worry about the co-pay |
1.2741 |
0.04635 |
135 |
104 |
25 |
6 |
1135 |
As your proctologist, I'm obliged to say 'Bottoms up!'" |
1.2737 |
0.04836 |
95 |
70 |
24 |
1 |
1136 |
It’s the answer to your alcohol problem. |
1.2737 |
0.05279 |
95 |
72 |
20 |
3 |
1137 |
This is just a little something to help you breathe. |
1.2737 |
0.05687 |
95 |
74 |
16 |
5 |
1138 |
Je parle français |
1.2737 |
0.05279 |
95 |
72 |
20 |
3 |
1139 |
But you ARE a sedative. |
1.2737 |
0.05687 |
95 |
74 |
16 |
5 |
1140 |
This has nothing to do with the office party that starts in 10 minutes. |
1.2736 |
0.04931 |
106 |
80 |
23 |
3 |
1141 |
You're going to feel a slight tug. |
1.2736 |
0.05451 |
106 |
83 |
17 |
6 |
1142 |
You'll finally get to breathe. |
1.2736 |
0.05110 |
106 |
81 |
21 |
4 |
1143 |
Good news! You stopped aging! |
1.2735 |
0.04798 |
117 |
89 |
24 |
4 |
1144 |
You might feel a little pressure but we’ll have you breathe for 10 minutes afterwards. |
1.2735 |
0.04798 |
117 |
89 |
24 |
4 |
1145 |
This will only hurt a little. Then you can breathe |
1.2735 |
0.04798 |
117 |
89 |
24 |
4 |
1146 |
I'll start with a small sample. But if that goes well, we may need to take the whole bottle. |
1.2734 |
0.04798 |
128 |
99 |
23 |
6 |
1147 |
The procedure is recommended for your age." |
1.2734 |
0.04668 |
128 |
98 |
25 |
5 |
1148 |
Your tests are all good, but you do need to breathe. A simple procedure can be performed right here. |
1.2734 |
0.05169 |
128 |
102 |
17 |
9 |
1149 |
You may hear a slight popping sound. |
1.2734 |
0.04925 |
128 |
100 |
21 |
7 |
1150 |
I have just the thing to help you breathe... |
1.2727 |
0.05766 |
88 |
68 |
16 |
4 |
1151 |
Let's see what's going on inside of you, shall we? |
1.2727 |
0.05116 |
121 |
95 |
19 |
7 |
1152 |
Simple, fast and safe procedure. It will all be over when you here a pop. |
1.2727 |
0.05766 |
88 |
68 |
16 |
4 |
1153 |
We're going to find out how approachable you are. |
1.2727 |
0.04979 |
121 |
94 |
21 |
6 |
1154 |
The test prep is uncomfortable, but it’s not the worst part. |
1.2727 |
0.05337 |
99 |
76 |
19 |
4 |
1155 |
... then you'll have an hour to breathe. |
1.2727 |
0.04987 |
110 |
84 |
22 |
4 |
1156 |
I have just the thing for your blockage. |
1.2727 |
0.04987 |
110 |
84 |
22 |
4 |
1157 |
Oh no, not invasive at all, and it will help you breathe so much better! |
1.2727 |
0.05466 |
110 |
87 |
16 |
7 |
1158 |
My nurse says your experiencing chills and feel like you've aged |
1.2727 |
0.05311 |
110 |
86 |
18 |
6 |
1159 |
Why do I feel like I’m about to get screwed? |
1.2727 |
0.05888 |
99 |
79 |
13 |
7 |
1160 |
Just remove your foil and tilt forwards, this wont hurt a bit |
1.2727 |
0.04821 |
132 |
103 |
22 |
7 |
1161 |
We need to run some tests, but I’m fairly certain you’re a red. |
1.2727 |
0.05311 |
110 |
86 |
18 |
6 |
1162 |
. " so, you're gonna feel a bit of pop and release of air. |
1.2727 |
0.04817 |
110 |
83 |
24 |
3 |
1163 |
Removing your cork is going to help you breathe better. |
1.2727 |
0.05337 |
99 |
76 |
19 |
4 |
1164 |
Sorry to tell you: You're screwed! |
1.2721 |
0.04362 |
136 |
103 |
29 |
4 |
1165 |
Yes, I believe we can relieve that tightness you're feeling in the top of your head." |
1.2720 |
0.05000 |
125 |
98 |
20 |
7 |
1166 |
Call it what you will. You'll be open and breathing. |
1.2720 |
0.04869 |
125 |
97 |
22 |
6 |
1167 |
I bet you wish you had a screw top right about now! |
1.2720 |
0.05000 |
125 |
98 |
20 |
7 |
1168 |
You’re not screwed after all! |
1.2720 |
0.04597 |
125 |
95 |
26 |
4 |
1169 |
how do I put this delicately… you’re screwed 🤷🏻♀️ |
1.2720 |
0.05000 |
125 |
98 |
20 |
7 |
1170 |
Let's celebrate your recovery. |
1.2719 |
0.05328 |
114 |
90 |
17 |
7 |
1171 |
This should help you breathe for a while. |
1.2719 |
0.05028 |
114 |
88 |
21 |
5 |
1172 |
Any last words? |
1.2719 |
0.05180 |
114 |
89 |
19 |
6 |
1173 |
Unfortunately, unlike today’s prostate cancer screening for men, there is no less invasive test to diagnose oxidation. |
1.2719 |
0.05180 |
114 |
89 |
19 |
6 |
1174 |
Bend over ... and don't forget to breath |
1.2718 |
0.05378 |
103 |
80 |
18 |
5 |
1175 |
Don’t fret. The result are back and all your vitals are better with aging. |
1.2718 |
0.05721 |
103 |
82 |
14 |
7 |
1176 |
All right Vinnie, get ready to cough. |
1.2718 |
0.05012 |
103 |
78 |
22 |
3 |
1177 |
I'd like you to just breathe for 30 minutes. |
1.2714 |
0.04738 |
140 |
110 |
22 |
8 |
1178 |
You're going to feel a pinch. |
1.2713 |
0.04637 |
129 |
99 |
25 |
5 |
1179 |
This might sting a little. |
1.2712 |
0.05058 |
118 |
92 |
20 |
6 |
1180 |
I have good news! Your insurance WILL cover 80% of the corkage fee |
1.2712 |
0.04913 |
118 |
91 |
22 |
5 |
1181 |
I can assure you, it’s a very simple procedure |
1.2712 |
0.04913 |
118 |
91 |
22 |
5 |
1182 |
I promise I will taste better next year! |
1.2710 |
0.05405 |
107 |
84 |
17 |
6 |
1183 |
Not to worry. At your age, we figured it was time to let you breathe. |
1.2710 |
0.05240 |
107 |
83 |
19 |
5 |
1184 |
I’d like to keep you overnight for observation. |
1.2710 |
0.04892 |
107 |
81 |
23 |
3 |
1185 |
No whining before it's time |
1.2710 |
0.04708 |
107 |
80 |
25 |
2 |
1186 |
It's just a routine taste... er, test. |
1.2708 |
0.06012 |
96 |
77 |
12 |
7 |
1187 |
First, the good news — it’s treatable. |
1.2708 |
0.05437 |
96 |
74 |
18 |
4 |
1188 |
Ah So,the key to this is to keep breathing |
1.2708 |
0.04559 |
96 |
70 |
26 |
0 |
1189 |
I know you're a twist-off, but this is the only procedure covered by your insurance |
1.2707 |
0.05133 |
133 |
107 |
16 |
10 |
1190 |
Yeah, aging is the pits. You're screwed. |
1.2705 |
0.04943 |
122 |
95 |
21 |
6 |
1191 |
It’s a very standard procedure, usually around 5 o’clock. |
1.2705 |
0.04804 |
122 |
94 |
23 |
5 |
1192 |
Guess where we're opening you up! |
1.2703 |
0.04779 |
111 |
84 |
24 |
3 |
1193 |
You will feel some slight pressure, but after that, just breathe. |
1.2703 |
0.05111 |
111 |
86 |
20 |
5 |
1194 |
I’ll remove the blockage, reduce the fluids and we’ll both feel much much better. |
1.2703 |
0.05111 |
111 |
86 |
20 |
5 |
1195 |
Oh no, these days we go in through the top. |
1.2700 |
0.05660 |
100 |
79 |
15 |
6 |
1196 |
Yes it's invasive, but you'll be in and out in minutes. |
1.2700 |
0.05096 |
100 |
76 |
21 |
3 |
1197 |
The bad news: you’re not getting any better with age. The good news: I have the perfect solution. |
1.2698 |
0.05091 |
126 |
100 |
18 |
8 |
1198 |
Nothing to worry about, you get better with age. |
1.2698 |
0.04965 |
126 |
99 |
20 |
7 |
1199 |
Look, you reach a certain age and these things just need to happen. |
1.2697 |
0.05929 |
89 |
70 |
14 |
5 |
1200 |
Don't worry I'm gonna make your whole open |
1.2697 |
0.05481 |
89 |
68 |
18 |
3 |
1201 |
Now we'll try a breathing exercise. |
1.2697 |
0.05929 |
89 |
70 |
14 |
5 |
1202 |
Are you here for the corkectomy? |
1.2696 |
0.05141 |
115 |
90 |
19 |
6 |
1203 |
There's nothing wrong with you that some crackers and cheese can't cure! |
1.2696 |
0.05429 |
115 |
92 |
15 |
8 |
1204 |
It's called a lobottle-omi. I promise, it's painless. |
1.2696 |
0.04990 |
115 |
89 |
21 |
5 |
1205 |
If you would please lie down, relax, and think about happy grapes basking in the sun. |
1.2696 |
0.04990 |
115 |
89 |
21 |
5 |
1206 |
Looks like we’ve found the cause of your headache Mr, Malbec. |
1.2696 |
0.04990 |
115 |
89 |
21 |
5 |
1207 |
No worries. It's an in an out procedure. |
1.2696 |
0.04990 |
115 |
89 |
21 |
5 |
1208 |
You’re gonna feel a little prick… |
1.2696 |
0.05141 |
115 |
90 |
19 |
6 |
1209 |
Not to worry, I've done two of these already today, and I'm feeling wondrously confident." |
1.2692 |
0.05333 |
104 |
81 |
18 |
5 |
1210 |
Opening up to your doctor is the first step to being cured |
1.2692 |
0.05333 |
104 |
81 |
18 |
5 |
1211 |
Just a simple procedure to improve your breathing. |
1.2692 |
0.04858 |
130 |
102 |
21 |
7 |
1212 |
We have a new way to screw you |
1.2692 |
0.04475 |
130 |
99 |
27 |
4 |
1213 |
I’m afraid you’re screwed. |
1.2692 |
0.05672 |
104 |
83 |
14 |
7 |
1214 |
You’ll be fine to drive yourself home after the procedure, but I won’t be. |
1.2692 |
0.05505 |
104 |
82 |
16 |
6 |
1215 |
You think you’re getting screwed now, wait for the bill. |
1.2692 |
0.04970 |
104 |
79 |
22 |
3 |
1216 |
Why don't we get drunk and corkscrew? |
1.2689 |
0.05021 |
119 |
93 |
20 |
6 |
1217 |
I think I can help you with that bottled-up feeling. |
1.2689 |
0.05429 |
119 |
96 |
14 |
9 |
1218 |
I've got something to help you breathe. |
1.2689 |
0.04877 |
119 |
92 |
22 |
5 |
1219 |
Don't worry. It's like a prostate exam--but with a better aroma. |
1.2689 |
0.05021 |
119 |
93 |
20 |
6 |
1220 |
You look a little plugged up, I think I have something to help you! |
1.2688 |
0.05949 |
93 |
74 |
13 |
6 |
1221 |
One final question;any plans for post-op ? |
1.2688 |
0.05749 |
93 |
73 |
15 |
5 |
1222 |
Don't worry. It'll be just a mosquito bite. |
1.2688 |
0.05542 |
93 |
72 |
17 |
4 |
1223 |
At your age it’s a necessary procedure. |
1.2685 |
0.05197 |
108 |
84 |
19 |
5 |
1224 |
I love a vintage with a good nose. |
1.2685 |
0.05028 |
108 |
83 |
21 |
4 |
1225 |
Don’t worry a bit. Removing that cork is a common procedure. |
1.2685 |
0.05197 |
108 |
84 |
19 |
5 |
1226 |
I won't put it in all the way. |
1.2683 |
0.05042 |
123 |
97 |
19 |
7 |
1227 |
We'll be the judge, if you're really "fine", wine. |
1.2683 |
0.05042 |
123 |
97 |
19 |
7 |
1228 |
Happy 18th Birthday. |
1.2683 |
0.04908 |
123 |
96 |
21 |
6 |
1229 |
We know your birth date, but now we have to see how you've aged. |
1.2680 |
0.05388 |
97 |
75 |
18 |
4 |
1230 |
Well, you keep saying, 'Pour pour me,'
so that's what we're going to do. |
1.2680 |
0.05584 |
97 |
76 |
16 |
5 |
1231 |
You say you are having a breathing problem? |
1.2680 |
0.05185 |
97 |
74 |
20 |
3 |
1232 |
This will enhance your ability to breathe. |
1.2680 |
0.05185 |
97 |
74 |
20 |
3 |
1233 |
We'll need to take a small sample for our tasters in the oenology lab. |
1.2679 |
0.05379 |
112 |
89 |
16 |
7 |
1234 |
Twist off sounds pretty good about now doesn't it? |
1.2679 |
0.05526 |
112 |
90 |
14 |
8 |
1235 |
Sorry.We have no cellar. |
1.2679 |
0.04909 |
112 |
86 |
22 |
4 |
1236 |
Just a little prick,twist and pop and you can breathe easy. |
1.2679 |
0.04909 |
112 |
86 |
22 |
4 |
1237 |
A little fresh air will never hurt |
1.2679 |
0.04570 |
112 |
84 |
26 |
2 |
1238 |
Not to worry. We’ll just drain the fluid and you should start feeling much lighter |
1.2679 |
0.05947 |
112 |
93 |
8 |
11 |
1239 |
No insurance? No worries. We've got a great payment plan. |
1.2677 |
0.04534 |
127 |
97 |
26 |
4 |
1240 |
Don't worry, I checked your prostate last year. |
1.2673 |
0.05610 |
101 |
80 |
15 |
6 |
1241 |
If you want to breathe, you must have the operation. |
1.2673 |
0.04852 |
101 |
76 |
23 |
2 |
1242 |
The good news is you're aging like a fine you. |
1.2673 |
0.05610 |
101 |
80 |
15 |
6 |
1243 |
I promise you we won't take very much |
1.2672 |
0.04798 |
116 |
89 |
23 |
4 |
1244 |
The good news is that there's no corkage co-pay. |
1.2672 |
0.04475 |
116 |
87 |
27 |
2 |
1245 |
I’ll screw you and next your healthcare provider will too |
1.2672 |
0.04952 |
116 |
90 |
21 |
5 |
1246 |
Trust me. You don't want to blow a cork. |
1.2667 |
0.05428 |
90 |
69 |
18 |
3 |
1247 |
Your cork won't feel a thing." |
1.2667 |
0.04929 |
105 |
80 |
22 |
3 |
1248 |
Just bend over and cough. |
1.2667 |
0.04841 |
120 |
93 |
22 |
5 |
1249 |
I need a 6 oz specimen. It won't hurt a bit. |
1.2667 |
0.05112 |
105 |
81 |
20 |
4 |
1250 |
It’s sort of like a colonoscopy… |
1.2667 |
0.05653 |
90 |
70 |
16 |
4 |
1251 |
You're 45 years old. It's time. |
1.2667 |
0.05112 |
105 |
81 |
20 |
4 |
1252 |
The good news is you're not getting a shot. |
1.2667 |
0.05288 |
105 |
82 |
18 |
5 |
1253 |
So, you're having some difficulty breathing? |
1.2661 |
0.04596 |
124 |
95 |
25 |
4 |
1254 |
so there is one procedure your insurance will cover... |
1.2661 |
0.05261 |
124 |
100 |
15 |
9 |
1255 |
In your case, aging is a good thing. I'll just perform a few tests to make sure you're good. |
1.2661 |
0.04814 |
109 |
83 |
23 |
3 |
1256 |
I have the perfect weight loss solution for you. |
1.2661 |
0.04814 |
109 |
83 |
23 |
3 |
1257 |
I was going to buy you dinner first, but... |
1.2661 |
0.04988 |
109 |
84 |
21 |
4 |
1258 |
We'll both enjoy this procedure! |
1.2661 |
0.04988 |
109 |
84 |
21 |
4 |
1259 |
Good news! I've got something for your headache! |
1.2661 |
0.04988 |
109 |
84 |
21 |
4 |
1260 |
As a proctologist, I'm more than qualified to handle this delicate operation. |
1.2661 |
0.05317 |
109 |
86 |
17 |
6 |
1261 |
We have to take a sample. |
1.2661 |
0.04814 |
109 |
83 |
23 |
3 |
1262 |
we'll need a small sample.. |
1.2660 |
0.05490 |
94 |
73 |
17 |
4 |
1263 |
The enema didn’t work?
I think I can help you. |
1.2660 |
0.05490 |
94 |
73 |
17 |
4 |
1264 |
This is going to help you breath a bit. |
1.2660 |
0.05892 |
94 |
75 |
13 |
6 |
1265 |
you'd be better off with a screw twist off cap |
1.2660 |
0.05695 |
94 |
74 |
15 |
5 |
1266 |
I've got something to help you unwind. |
1.2660 |
0.05278 |
94 |
72 |
19 |
3 |
1267 |
Finally! I get to give YOU a headache! |
1.2655 |
0.05186 |
113 |
89 |
18 |
6 |
1268 |
Yes, it's the most uncomfortable part of your annual physical. But I have to do it three times a day. |
1.2655 |
0.05186 |
113 |
89 |
18 |
6 |
1269 |
You’re all bottled up…I think we can uncork your inner spirit! |
1.2655 |
0.05031 |
113 |
88 |
20 |
5 |
1270 |
There will be a copay and an uncorking fee. |
1.2655 |
0.05031 |
113 |
88 |
20 |
5 |
1271 |
Corked unlikely , but you may experience some slight discomfort . |
1.2653 |
0.05340 |
98 |
76 |
18 |
4 |
1272 |
Looks like you're retaining fluid. |
1.2653 |
0.05139 |
98 |
75 |
20 |
3 |
1273 |
This is going to hurt you more than it's going to hurt me. |
1.2653 |
0.04930 |
98 |
74 |
22 |
2 |
1274 |
I have your tests back, and you're delicious with a burger. |
1.2653 |
0.04930 |
98 |
74 |
22 |
2 |
1275 |
A corkoscopy? Really? What gives you that impression?" |
1.2653 |
0.05720 |
98 |
78 |
14 |
6 |
1276 |
You’ve reached the age where this is standard procedure |
1.2653 |
0.05139 |
98 |
75 |
20 |
3 |
1277 |
You're very mature for your age. |
1.2650 |
0.04443 |
117 |
88 |
27 |
2 |
1278 |
It’s time to lower your alcohol |
1.2650 |
0.04605 |
117 |
89 |
25 |
3 |
1279 |
You'll feel a little pinch but we'll all feel better in a little while. |
1.2647 |
0.05200 |
102 |
79 |
19 |
4 |
1280 |
You might feel a little pop and then it will all be over. |
1.2647 |
0.05383 |
102 |
80 |
17 |
5 |
1281 |
Relax...it's included in the concierge service! |
1.2647 |
0.04812 |
102 |
77 |
23 |
2 |
1282 |
Good News! I have just the thing to keep you from aging. |
1.2645 |
0.04947 |
121 |
95 |
20 |
6 |
1283 |
You’ll lose some weight and it’ll cover your co-pay. |
1.2645 |
0.05084 |
121 |
96 |
18 |
7 |
1284 |
If you think this is going to hurt, wait till you see my bill. |
1.2645 |
0.04806 |
121 |
94 |
22 |
5 |
1285 |
No need to worry. I've done this procedure many times. |
1.2645 |
0.04806 |
121 |
94 |
22 |
5 |
1286 |
You say you feel nervous, but I think it's just the wine talking. |
1.2644 |
0.05771 |
87 |
68 |
15 |
4 |
1287 |
This won’t involve any bottle-y fluids! |
1.2644 |
0.05029 |
87 |
65 |
21 |
1 |
1288 |
A bottle in front of me, or a frontal lobotomy? |
1.2644 |
0.05535 |
87 |
67 |
17 |
3 |
1289 |
This is just to help you breathe. |
1.2642 |
0.05069 |
106 |
82 |
20 |
4 |
1290 |
This is the best and only way to check your legs. |
1.2642 |
0.05244 |
106 |
83 |
18 |
5 |
1291 |
It's just a part of the aging process! |
1.2642 |
0.04507 |
106 |
79 |
26 |
1 |
1292 |
Don't worry, sampling a little fluid will still leave you full bodied. |
1.2642 |
0.05069 |
106 |
82 |
20 |
4 |
1293 |
Don't worry, this will all be over right after dinner. |
1.2640 |
0.05345 |
125 |
102 |
13 |
10 |
1294 |
I have good news and bad news... |
1.2637 |
0.04901 |
91 |
68 |
22 |
1 |
1295 |
Don't worry about the copay. You've aged into Medicare. |
1.2636 |
0.05114 |
110 |
86 |
19 |
5 |
1296 |
The chart says your have aged enough. |
1.2636 |
0.05114 |
110 |
86 |
19 |
5 |
1297 |
You'll seem much better after you've been allowed to breathe for an hour. |
1.2636 |
0.04473 |
129 |
99 |
26 |
4 |
1298 |
Don't be afraid. If you can relax after a little prick and a gentle twist, you'll soon breathe better and fulfill your purpose in life. |
1.2636 |
0.04985 |
129 |
103 |
18 |
8 |
1299 |
Don't worry, I just need to get your white and red counts. |
1.2636 |
0.04862 |
129 |
102 |
20 |
7 |
1300 |
Relax! You just need to breathe. |
1.2632 |
0.05229 |
95 |
73 |
19 |
3 |
1301 |
Unfortunately, the "Rabbit" is not covered by your insurance. |
1.2632 |
0.05837 |
95 |
76 |
13 |
6 |
1302 |
Close your eyes. |
1.2632 |
0.05145 |
114 |
90 |
18 |
6 |
1303 |
You're my last patient of the day! |
1.2632 |
0.04992 |
114 |
89 |
20 |
5 |
1304 |
We need to open you before you go sour. |
1.2632 |
0.04671 |
114 |
87 |
24 |
3 |
1305 |
After a tiny prick you will feel a great release of pressure and a long awaited outpouring of joy. |
1.2632 |
0.05439 |
95 |
74 |
17 |
4 |
1306 |
At least you won't have to bend over. |
1.2632 |
0.04502 |
114 |
86 |
26 |
2 |
1307 |
Ah, is it somebody’s first colonoscorkpy |
1.2632 |
0.05145 |
114 |
90 |
18 |
6 |
1308 |
I've got just the thing to relieve that tension headache. |
1.2627 |
0.05305 |
118 |
95 |
15 |
8 |
1309 |
It's just a routine procedure. I do it every evening. |
1.2626 |
0.05292 |
99 |
77 |
18 |
4 |
1310 |
You'll hear a pop and it will all be over. |
1.2626 |
0.05847 |
99 |
80 |
12 |
7 |
1311 |
On the other hand, getting older does have some advantages. |
1.2626 |
0.05094 |
99 |
76 |
20 |
3 |
1312 |
Don’t worry, I’ll pull it out before anything happens. |
1.2623 |
0.04911 |
122 |
96 |
20 |
6 |
1313 |
Just close your eyes and think of Napa Valley. |
1.2621 |
0.05155 |
103 |
80 |
19 |
4 |
1314 |
I've got something to help with your breathing. |
1.2621 |
0.04772 |
103 |
78 |
23 |
2 |
1315 |
It's your alcohol level that I'm actually most concerned about. |
1.2621 |
0.05155 |
103 |
80 |
19 |
4 |
1316 |
Of course you're screwed by your medical insurance, but there's no reason to whine about it. |
1.2621 |
0.05512 |
103 |
82 |
15 |
6 |
1317 |
Don't Worry... You Will Not Feel A Thing. |
1.2621 |
0.05682 |
103 |
83 |
13 |
7 |
1318 |
Tried Ex-Lax? This is way better!
Lean over, please. |
1.2621 |
0.05155 |
103 |
80 |
19 |
4 |
1319 |
I'm a pulmonologist and I'm here to help you breathe. |
1.2619 |
0.05648 |
84 |
65 |
16 |
3 |
1320 |
Here, Let me help you uncork your potential |
1.2619 |
0.04533 |
126 |
97 |
25 |
4 |
1321 |
The last time you were here, you were just a bottle of water. Did you get religion? |
1.2619 |
0.05062 |
126 |
101 |
17 |
8 |
1322 |
Someone of your age and complexion - it's to be expected. |
1.2617 |
0.04664 |
107 |
81 |
24 |
2 |
1323 |
Peel your foil and cough for me please. |
1.2617 |
0.04849 |
107 |
82 |
22 |
3 |
1324 |
We're going to need to run a LOT of tests. |
1.2615 |
0.04575 |
130 |
101 |
24 |
5 |
1325 |
Don’t worry, I practiced this procedure frequently in med school. |
1.2615 |
0.04443 |
130 |
100 |
26 |
4 |
1326 |
Just a routine drill and fill. |
1.2614 |
0.05236 |
88 |
67 |
19 |
2 |
1327 |
You might feel a little stick |
1.2614 |
0.05937 |
88 |
70 |
13 |
5 |
1328 |
Let's just say you're going to wish we hadn't aged you so long. |
1.2614 |
0.05713 |
88 |
69 |
15 |
4 |
1329 |
Mr Pino, you had an excellent check up. Not too sweet. Not too dry.
We just need to relieve a bit of pressure due to your aging process. |
1.2614 |
0.06153 |
88 |
71 |
11 |
6 |
1330 |
I'd like to keep you overnight for oxidation. |
1.2613 |
0.05386 |
111 |
89 |
15 |
7 |
1331 |
I assure you, Mr. Merlot, this will be a smooth extraction. |
1.2613 |
0.05073 |
111 |
87 |
19 |
5 |
1332 |
Trust me, it's a routine procedure. |
1.2613 |
0.04909 |
111 |
86 |
21 |
4 |
1333 |
It won’t hurt.
Stop wining ! |
1.2613 |
0.04909 |
111 |
86 |
21 |
4 |
1334 |
It's just so you can breath. |
1.2613 |
0.05386 |
111 |
89 |
15 |
7 |
1335 |
Let it decant a while before we jump into surgery |
1.2613 |
0.04909 |
111 |
86 |
21 |
4 |
1336 |
I’m about to lose my license to legally practice medicine, but it’ll be worth it. |
1.2613 |
0.05232 |
111 |
88 |
17 |
6 |
1337 |
Don't worry, you'll just feel a little pinch. |
1.2612 |
0.04729 |
134 |
106 |
21 |
7 |
1338 |
You need to open up more. |
1.2609 |
0.05096 |
92 |
70 |
20 |
2 |
1339 |
The good news is that you are not a screw top. |
1.2609 |
0.04636 |
115 |
88 |
24 |
3 |
1340 |
Not all wines are meant to age. |
1.2609 |
0.04636 |
115 |
88 |
24 |
3 |
1341 |
I’m told you’re having trouble opening up. |
1.2609 |
0.04856 |
92 |
69 |
22 |
1 |
1342 |
You can't see the twist ending- it's a real corker. |
1.2609 |
0.04797 |
115 |
89 |
22 |
4 |
1343 |
Come on now, act your age. |
1.2609 |
0.04954 |
115 |
90 |
20 |
5 |
1344 |
Your insurance covers the procedure, but this hospital charges a corking fee ...which I'll waive for a patient of your refinement, Mr Bordeaux. |
1.2609 |
0.06157 |
92 |
75 |
10 |
7 |
1345 |
Don't worry I have the perfect procedure to help you breathe |
1.2605 |
0.04539 |
119 |
91 |
25 |
3 |
1346 |
We'll just need to remove a little fluid from your chest cavity. |
1.2604 |
0.05389 |
96 |
75 |
17 |
4 |
1347 |
Since you couldn’t fill the cup, this is our only option. |
1.2604 |
0.04966 |
96 |
73 |
21 |
2 |
1348 |
Come on, live a little. |
1.2602 |
0.05011 |
123 |
98 |
18 |
7 |
1349 |
We've received your test results, and I'm sorry to say, you're screwed. |
1.2602 |
0.04737 |
123 |
96 |
22 |
5 |
1350 |
Don't Whine |
1.2600 |
0.04845 |
100 |
76 |
22 |
2 |
1351 |
I swear I'll stop at one glass. |
1.2600 |
0.05049 |
100 |
77 |
20 |
3 |
1352 |
I know you're nervous, but in a few twists you'll be able to breathe. |
1.2600 |
0.05049 |
100 |
77 |
20 |
3 |
1353 |
Depends how you define ‘invasive’. |
1.2600 |
0.05617 |
100 |
80 |
14 |
6 |
1354 |
Don't worry, just breathe. |
1.2600 |
0.05245 |
100 |
78 |
18 |
4 |
1355 |
This won’t hurt a bit. Now bend over. |
1.2600 |
0.05617 |
100 |
80 |
14 |
6 |
1356 |
I feel like I'm passed my peak, Doc."
"Nonsense, you're in your prime and that's reason to celebrate. |
1.2600 |
0.05617 |
100 |
80 |
14 |
6 |
1357 |
Don’t worry, it’s a simple procedure that should help you breathe. |
1.2600 |
0.05245 |
100 |
78 |
18 |
4 |
1358 |
The prep is the worst part. |
1.2600 |
0.04845 |
100 |
76 |
22 |
2 |
1359 |
Is this your first colonoscopy? |
1.2596 |
0.05291 |
104 |
82 |
17 |
5 |
1360 |
Now just lean forward and cough. |
1.2596 |
0.05633 |
104 |
84 |
13 |
7 |
1361 |
This is not going to hurt a bit. |
1.2596 |
0.05465 |
104 |
83 |
15 |
6 |
1362 |
Congratulations, it’s graduation day. |
1.2596 |
0.05465 |
104 |
83 |
15 |
6 |
1363 |
Open wide and say ‘fwoomp.’ |
1.2596 |
0.05291 |
104 |
82 |
17 |
5 |
1364 |
So, I hear that you're having trouble breathing. |
1.2596 |
0.04926 |
104 |
80 |
21 |
3 |
1365 |
I promise I won't screw you! |
1.2596 |
0.05112 |
104 |
81 |
19 |
4 |
1366 |
It's a simple procedure and then you can breathe. |
1.2596 |
0.05112 |
104 |
81 |
19 |
4 |
1367 |
So, you have trouble breathing. |
1.2593 |
0.06029 |
81 |
64 |
13 |
4 |
1368 |
Nervous? I've got just the thing to open You up! |
1.2593 |
0.04627 |
108 |
82 |
24 |
2 |
1369 |
Let me pick your brain for a minute... |
1.2593 |
0.05158 |
108 |
85 |
18 |
5 |
1370 |
The gold standard is to check your terroir. |
1.2593 |
0.06029 |
81 |
64 |
13 |
4 |
1371 |
Your terroir is good. I'll let you breathe for a while and then I'll check your nose. |
1.2589 |
0.04528 |
112 |
85 |
25 |
2 |
1372 |
Unfortunately your insurance didn't cover the screw top transplant. |
1.2589 |
0.04871 |
112 |
87 |
21 |
4 |
1373 |
Indeed, you are a serious wine, though I'm guessing at this point you'd rather be a screw-off. |
1.2589 |
0.05033 |
112 |
88 |
19 |
5 |
1374 |
The procedure actually has a very high success rate for individuals of your vintage. |
1.2589 |
0.05190 |
112 |
89 |
17 |
6 |
1375 |
All men your age need this procedure. |
1.2589 |
0.05033 |
112 |
88 |
19 |
5 |
1376 |
Hey, it’s five o’clock somewhere |
1.2589 |
0.04871 |
112 |
87 |
21 |
4 |
1377 |
This procedure will really open up the 'real' you! |
1.2589 |
0.05190 |
112 |
89 |
17 |
6 |
1378 |
…but the good news is it’s covered by your insurance plan! |
1.2589 |
0.04871 |
112 |
87 |
21 |
4 |
1379 |
Well, it's sort of like a colonoscopy endoscope ... but with a twist. |
1.2588 |
0.05835 |
85 |
67 |
14 |
4 |
1380 |
I'm afraid I have some bad news... I'm an oenologist, not an oncologist. |
1.2588 |
0.06296 |
85 |
69 |
10 |
6 |
1381 |
This will only hurt for a minute but you're going to make a lot of people happy. |
1.2586 |
0.05066 |
116 |
92 |
18 |
6 |
1382 |
Don’t worry, I’ll feel better when it’s over! |
1.2586 |
0.05354 |
116 |
94 |
14 |
8 |
1383 |
This will only be a small prick. |
1.2584 |
0.05878 |
89 |
71 |
13 |
5 |
1384 |
I can make it so any wine in the world has a good nose. |
1.2584 |
0.05426 |
89 |
69 |
17 |
3 |
1385 |
You have a fine cork to be screwed & it won't hurt a bit. |
1.2583 |
0.04807 |
120 |
94 |
21 |
5 |
1386 |
You're gonna blow your cork when you hear this idea. |
1.2583 |
0.04950 |
120 |
95 |
19 |
6 |
1387 |
Just a quick pinch, then relief! |
1.2581 |
0.05492 |
93 |
73 |
16 |
4 |
1388 |
You seem bottled up. Fear not. Relief is possible. |
1.2581 |
0.04974 |
124 |
99 |
18 |
7 |
1389 |
Don’t worry about size, you can self-anesthetize. |
1.2581 |
0.05048 |
93 |
71 |
20 |
2 |
1390 |
This might hurt. |
1.2581 |
0.05048 |
93 |
71 |
20 |
2 |
1391 |
Don’t worry, this has become a routine procedure for me. |
1.2581 |
0.04974 |
124 |
99 |
18 |
7 |
1392 |
It’s just a minor extraction. |
1.2581 |
0.05492 |
93 |
73 |
16 |
4 |
1393 |
A little something to numb the pain… |
1.2581 |
0.05492 |
93 |
73 |
16 |
4 |
1394 |
At your age,it really would be best to open up |
1.2581 |
0.05048 |
93 |
71 |
20 |
2 |
1395 |
im gonna screw you |
1.2581 |
0.04841 |
124 |
98 |
20 |
6 |
1396 |
You are going to put that where? |
1.2581 |
0.05492 |
93 |
73 |
16 |
4 |
1397 |
It is a minimally invasive proceedure. |
1.2577 |
0.05340 |
97 |
76 |
17 |
4 |
1398 |
Spit it out or else. |
1.2577 |
0.05538 |
97 |
77 |
15 |
5 |
1399 |
I’m afraid your test results showed notes of vanilla… |
1.2577 |
0.05538 |
97 |
77 |
15 |
5 |
1400 |
I'm afraid I have some bad news for you, but some very GOOD news for the monthly hospital board meeting... |
1.2574 |
0.05743 |
101 |
82 |
12 |
7 |
1401 |
We made need a pair of lips to control the bleeding. |
1.2574 |
0.04593 |
101 |
76 |
24 |
1 |
1402 |
Don't be a whiner, it will just be a little pinch! |
1.2574 |
0.05006 |
101 |
78 |
20 |
3 |
1403 |
Let's help you breathe then, shall we? |
1.2574 |
0.05200 |
101 |
79 |
18 |
4 |
1404 |
You have a $15 corkage copay. |
1.2574 |
0.05200 |
101 |
79 |
18 |
4 |
1405 |
We'll have that out in no time! |
1.2574 |
0.05006 |
101 |
78 |
20 |
3 |
1406 |
Let’s talk about your deductible. |
1.2574 |
0.05387 |
101 |
80 |
16 |
5 |
1407 |
We can do this the easy way or the hard way. |
1.2571 |
0.05069 |
105 |
82 |
19 |
4 |
1408 |
The less aggressive option is to be boxed. |
1.2571 |
0.05246 |
105 |
83 |
17 |
5 |
1409 |
Great news, the lab results confirmed that you'll pair nicely with my dinner. |
1.2569 |
0.04772 |
109 |
84 |
22 |
3 |
1410 |
Relax, we just need to air you out a bit! |
1.2569 |
0.04947 |
109 |
85 |
20 |
4 |
1411 |
Let's just get rid of that nasty cork. |
1.2569 |
0.05592 |
109 |
89 |
12 |
8 |
1412 |
You really do not want your life to slowly sip away. |
1.2569 |
0.04772 |
109 |
84 |
22 |
3 |
1413 |
There's just one blockage to clear. |
1.2566 |
0.04833 |
113 |
88 |
21 |
4 |
1414 |
Just relax and bend over. |
1.2566 |
0.05301 |
113 |
91 |
15 |
7 |
1415 |
We just need to draw a little red stuff. |
1.2566 |
0.04993 |
113 |
89 |
19 |
5 |
1416 |
Just sit back and unwind. |
1.2566 |
0.05301 |
113 |
91 |
15 |
7 |
1417 |
I promise that you will breathe easier after this treatment. |
1.2566 |
0.04666 |
113 |
87 |
23 |
3 |
1418 |
I learned this procedure as a young medical student in France. |
1.2564 |
0.06171 |
78 |
62 |
12 |
4 |
1419 |
Do you mind if I bring in some residents to observe?
They've only ever opened screw tops. |
1.2564 |
0.05028 |
117 |
93 |
18 |
6 |
1420 |
Don't worry, I am a connoisseur. |
1.2564 |
0.04726 |
117 |
91 |
22 |
4 |
1421 |
I think you'll be amused by my presumption. |
1.2562 |
0.05052 |
121 |
97 |
17 |
7 |
1422 |
No worries - I've done 100s of these procedures! |
1.2562 |
0.04771 |
121 |
95 |
21 |
5 |
1423 |
Your old friend Box O'Wine had no complaints... |
1.2561 |
0.05706 |
82 |
64 |
15 |
3 |
1424 |
We're out...of merlot. |
1.2561 |
0.05706 |
82 |
64 |
15 |
3 |
1425 |
Just trust me, you won't feel a thing |
1.2560 |
0.04806 |
125 |
99 |
20 |
6 |
1426 |
Well it's good news! My next patient is a steak. |
1.2560 |
0.04806 |
125 |
99 |
20 |
6 |
1427 |
Smile! It's a party, and you're invited. |
1.2560 |
0.04806 |
125 |
99 |
20 |
6 |
1428 |
Don't worry. I'm here to help you breathe. |
1.2558 |
0.05774 |
86 |
68 |
14 |
4 |
1429 |
You will feel a small pinch. |
1.2558 |
0.05774 |
86 |
68 |
14 |
4 |
1430 |
If you had a twist cap, the procedure would be completely noninvasive. |
1.2558 |
0.05013 |
86 |
65 |
20 |
1 |
1431 |
No worries - just a jab and some pressure and we’ll get you breathing in no time. |
1.2558 |
0.04832 |
129 |
103 |
19 |
7 |
1432 |
We’ll just drain some excess liquid from your cranium, and you’ll be good as nouveau! |
1.2556 |
0.05600 |
90 |
71 |
15 |
4 |
1433 |
Just a little prick and all that pressure will be gone. |
1.2556 |
0.06030 |
90 |
73 |
11 |
6 |
1434 |
We're just going to take a little sample to prove to the police that your alcohol content is below the legal limit. |
1.2556 |
0.05819 |
90 |
72 |
13 |
5 |
1435 |
We’re just going to pop you into hospital and tidy up your insides” |
1.2556 |
0.05819 |
90 |
72 |
13 |
5 |
1436 |
It’s just as bad on your part, you’re talking to a human❕ |
1.2556 |
0.05373 |
90 |
70 |
17 |
3 |
1437 |
We'll have you breathing feely in no time. |
1.2553 |
0.05226 |
94 |
73 |
18 |
3 |
1438 |
It's a routine procedure |
1.2553 |
0.05226 |
94 |
73 |
18 |
3 |
1439 |
Don't worry. With current recycling laws, you'll be reincarnated in no time. |
1.2553 |
0.05647 |
94 |
75 |
14 |
5 |
1440 |
That smell? Oh, it's just a roast liver with some fava beans, why do you ask...? |
1.2553 |
0.06038 |
94 |
77 |
10 |
7 |
1441 |
I will warn you after two glasses I become a total bitch. |
1.2553 |
0.05440 |
94 |
74 |
16 |
4 |
1442 |
This is going to hurt me, more than it’s going to hurt you. |
1.2553 |
0.05647 |
94 |
75 |
14 |
5 |
1443 |
Your whining because you keep your emotions bottled up. |
1.2551 |
0.05089 |
98 |
76 |
19 |
3 |
1444 |
I wish you'd be more open with me. |
1.2551 |
0.05089 |
98 |
76 |
19 |
3 |
1445 |
Now if you were under 10 bucks a bottle,
I wouldn't have made you come in today. |
1.2551 |
0.05487 |
98 |
78 |
15 |
5 |
1446 |
I'm going to help you breathe a little. |
1.2551 |
0.05089 |
98 |
76 |
19 |
3 |
1447 |
Nowadays, cork replacement is a lot more common than you’d think. |
1.2551 |
0.05292 |
98 |
77 |
17 |
4 |
1448 |
It’s just a quick procedure and I promise, we’ll BOTH feel a lot better. |
1.2551 |
0.05676 |
98 |
79 |
13 |
6 |
1449 |
Turn your label and cough |
1.2551 |
0.04878 |
98 |
75 |
21 |
2 |
1450 |
No need to worry, I do this procedure every afternoon at the club. |
1.2549 |
0.05155 |
102 |
80 |
18 |
4 |
1451 |
This will definitely take care of the crick in your neck. |
1.2549 |
0.04963 |
102 |
79 |
20 |
3 |
1452 |
You can trust me, I'm a mixologist. |
1.2549 |
0.04555 |
102 |
77 |
24 |
1 |
1453 |
Of course a corkendectomy is a real medical procedure. |
1.2547 |
0.05027 |
106 |
83 |
19 |
4 |
1454 |
Oh yes, I have a great way to improve your breathing. |
1.2547 |
0.05372 |
106 |
85 |
15 |
6 |
1455 |
It's a simple out-patient procedure...It will free up the tightness and help you breathe much more easily |
1.2547 |
0.05372 |
106 |
85 |
15 |
6 |
1456 |
Shaking in your sentiment, are you? |
1.2547 |
0.05027 |
106 |
83 |
19 |
4 |
1457 |
And you are going to put that WHERE? |
1.2547 |
0.04845 |
106 |
82 |
21 |
3 |
1458 |
This should only take a few seconds. |
1.2547 |
0.05027 |
106 |
83 |
19 |
4 |
1459 |
No, no. That’s just the wine talking. |
1.2547 |
0.04655 |
106 |
81 |
23 |
2 |
1460 |
I take that back. It IS kind of brain surgery for you. |
1.2545 |
0.05074 |
110 |
87 |
18 |
5 |
1461 |
It's the only way to tell if you've gone bad |
1.2545 |
0.04734 |
110 |
85 |
22 |
3 |
1462 |
We're having a little retirement party for Nurse Jenkins. |
1.2545 |
0.05074 |
110 |
87 |
18 |
5 |
1463 |
Okay, it’s time for your corkotomy. |
1.2545 |
0.05236 |
110 |
88 |
16 |
6 |
1464 |
I promise you’ll be able to breathe better after the procedure contest |
1.2545 |
0.04907 |
110 |
86 |
20 |
4 |
1465 |
You just need to breathe, Mr. Malbec. |
1.2545 |
0.05236 |
110 |
88 |
16 |
6 |
1466 |
A routine procedure to release the pressure. |
1.2542 |
0.04990 |
118 |
94 |
18 |
6 |
1467 |
This won't hurt...much. |
1.2542 |
0.04533 |
118 |
91 |
24 |
3 |
1468 |
I hope you're not a twist-top! |
1.2542 |
0.04842 |
118 |
93 |
20 |
5 |
1469 |
Give it 3 years and you should be fine! |
1.2542 |
0.05133 |
118 |
95 |
16 |
7 |
1470 |
Trust me. You won’t feel a thing. |
1.2542 |
0.04371 |
118 |
90 |
26 |
2 |
1471 |
Don't worry. This won't hurt as much as the bill. |
1.2541 |
0.04592 |
122 |
95 |
23 |
4 |
1472 |
Not everything gets better with age, I’m afraid! |
1.2541 |
0.04737 |
122 |
96 |
21 |
5 |
1473 |
Colonoscopy. Why? |
1.2532 |
0.06361 |
79 |
64 |
10 |
5 |
1474 |
You're going to feel a little pinch. |
1.2530 |
0.05645 |
83 |
65 |
15 |
3 |
1475 |
Do you mind if we get started? I've got a 200 lb aged Gouda waiting for me next door. |
1.2529 |
0.05715 |
87 |
69 |
14 |
4 |
1476 |
It's a simple procedure that will help you breathe. |
1.2527 |
0.05321 |
91 |
71 |
17 |
3 |
1477 |
Now, before we do this, I will have to do a blood test. |
1.2526 |
0.05389 |
95 |
75 |
16 |
4 |
1478 |
Just wait till you see your bill! |
1.2526 |
0.05790 |
95 |
77 |
12 |
6 |
1479 |
The good news is we don't need to use the stirrups. |
1.2526 |
0.04956 |
95 |
73 |
20 |
2 |
1480 |
This shouldn’t hurt. You may experience a slight hangover. |
1.2526 |
0.05980 |
95 |
78 |
10 |
7 |
1481 |
No worries, you have already the anesthesia. |
1.2526 |
0.05177 |
95 |
74 |
18 |
3 |
1482 |
Can you please bend over and cough for me. |
1.2526 |
0.05593 |
95 |
76 |
14 |
5 |
1483 |
Breathe, I promise not to screw it up |
1.2526 |
0.05593 |
95 |
76 |
14 |
5 |
1484 |
On the bright side, at least you don't have to wear one of those humiliating paper gowns. |
1.2525 |
0.05979 |
99 |
82 |
9 |
8 |
1485 |
So, Let's talk about that yeast infusion you had about 20 years ago..... |
1.2525 |
0.05624 |
99 |
80 |
13 |
6 |
1486 |
I'll be honest. You're gonna feel a little pinch. |
1.2525 |
0.05245 |
99 |
78 |
17 |
4 |
1487 |
Relax. You won't really feel screwed until you see the size of your co-pay. |
1.2525 |
0.05438 |
99 |
79 |
15 |
5 |
1488 |
C’mon, it’s just your cork. |
1.2525 |
0.05245 |
99 |
78 |
17 |
4 |
1489 |
They call me 'the grapist for' a reason, you know. |
1.2524 |
0.05470 |
103 |
83 |
14 |
6 |
1490 |
While the procedure’s experimental, my colleagues and I feel it will relieve your fear of ships. |
1.2524 |
0.05641 |
103 |
84 |
12 |
7 |
1491 |
This is not exactly brain surgery, but it should relieve the pressure. |
1.2524 |
0.04921 |
103 |
80 |
20 |
3 |
1492 |
You may hear a slightly marvelous popping sound. |
1.2523 |
0.05159 |
107 |
85 |
17 |
5 |
1493 |
Tests would indicate your cork comes out more than once a week. |
1.2523 |
0.04618 |
107 |
82 |
23 |
2 |
1494 |
I highly recommend the procedure for someone your age. |
1.2523 |
0.04805 |
107 |
83 |
21 |
3 |
1495 |
Now bend over, and no whining. |
1.2523 |
0.04985 |
107 |
84 |
19 |
4 |
1496 |
The operation will be quick, painless,
and pairs well with ribeye. |
1.2523 |
0.04805 |
107 |
83 |
21 |
3 |
1497 |
In my profession, we consider it unhealthy to keep all that bottled up |
1.2523 |
0.05490 |
107 |
87 |
13 |
7 |
1498 |
Don't whine... it's just a sting. |
1.2523 |
0.04985 |
107 |
84 |
19 |
4 |
1499 |
Now, you’ll feel some slight pressure |
1.2523 |
0.05327 |
107 |
86 |
15 |
6 |
1500 |
The good news is you’ve reached a fine-vintage year… the bad news is that you’ve exceeded your shelf life. |
1.2523 |
0.05349 |
111 |
90 |
14 |
7 |
1501 |
So basically what you're saying is I'm screwed. |
1.2523 |
0.05194 |
111 |
89 |
16 |
6 |
1502 |
It won’t hurt a bit. I really want to get to the bottom of this. |
1.2523 |
0.05034 |
111 |
88 |
18 |
5 |
1503 |
Now, about my fee. |
1.2523 |
0.04868 |
111 |
87 |
20 |
4 |
1504 |
There is a simple procedure I can do to help you breathe. |
1.2523 |
0.04697 |
111 |
86 |
22 |
3 |
1505 |
Alright. Close your eyes. You might feel a slight pinch. |
1.2523 |
0.05034 |
111 |
88 |
18 |
5 |
1506 |
Overall you’re very lively but the hints of apple make us want to do further testing |
1.2523 |
0.05500 |
111 |
91 |
12 |
8 |
1507 |
I think I'm about to be screwed... |
1.2522 |
0.04916 |
115 |
91 |
19 |
5 |
1508 |
Unfortunately, we must lobotomize. |
1.2522 |
0.05069 |
115 |
92 |
17 |
6 |
1509 |
First, the good news: the corkage fee is fully covered by your insurance! |
1.2522 |
0.05217 |
115 |
93 |
15 |
7 |
1510 |
Your labs came back - the good news is those citrus undertones were benign |
1.2520 |
0.04842 |
123 |
98 |
19 |
6 |
1511 |
Stop with the whine! I'll pop that out, and you'll be breathing in no time. |
1.2519 |
0.04888 |
131 |
106 |
17 |
8 |
1512 |
Alright, time for your declogging procedure. |
1.2500 |
0.05423 |
104 |
84 |
14 |
6 |
1513 |
For the next tast--TEST, we'll need to draw some of your fluids. |
1.2500 |
0.05339 |
96 |
76 |
16 |
4 |
1514 |
In fact, many find it to be a pleasurable experience. |
1.2500 |
0.05130 |
96 |
75 |
18 |
3 |
1515 |
Can't we just do a blood test??? |
1.2500 |
0.04830 |
112 |
88 |
20 |
4 |
1516 |
Screwed! |
1.2500 |
0.05585 |
84 |
66 |
15 |
3 |
1517 |
I worked as a sommelier before I got my MD!” |
1.2500 |
0.05339 |
96 |
76 |
16 |
4 |
1518 |
But getting screwed is fun! |
1.2500 |
0.05492 |
92 |
73 |
15 |
4 |
1519 |
Looks like a case of over-fermentation, which can only be cured by immediate cork-removal surgery followed by complete decantation without delay. |
1.2500 |
0.05067 |
104 |
82 |
18 |
4 |
1520 |
Turn your head and cough. |
1.2500 |
0.04879 |
104 |
81 |
20 |
3 |
1521 |
You just need to breathe. |
1.2500 |
0.04994 |
112 |
89 |
18 |
5 |
1522 |
You're going to feel a slight poke |
1.2500 |
0.04766 |
108 |
84 |
21 |
3 |
1523 |
I heard you recently turned 40, Monsieur Rothschild. |
1.2500 |
0.05752 |
100 |
82 |
11 |
7 |
1524 |
Well then, let's get the party started |
1.2500 |
0.04706 |
128 |
102 |
20 |
6 |
1525 |
Don't worry. You won't feel a thing and neither will I. |
1.2500 |
0.04879 |
104 |
81 |
20 |
3 |
1526 |
What?"
"I wouldn't dream of screwing you. |
1.2500 |
0.05752 |
100 |
82 |
11 |
7 |
1527 |
Have you ever heard of a corkoscopy? |
1.2500 |
0.06033 |
80 |
64 |
12 |
4 |
1528 |
It's either this or I break your neck off on that countertop over there. |
1.2500 |
0.04879 |
104 |
81 |
20 |
3 |
1529 |
This is going to hurt you a lot more than it hurts me. |
1.2500 |
0.05339 |
96 |
76 |
16 |
4 |
1530 |
This won't hurt. |
1.2500 |
0.04879 |
116 |
92 |
19 |
5 |
1531 |
I’m sorry to report this diagnosis but you’r screwed |
1.2500 |
0.04944 |
108 |
85 |
19 |
4 |
1532 |
The bad news: this’ll hurt for about 30 seconds. The good news: you’ve been invited to a party! |
1.2500 |
0.04807 |
124 |
99 |
19 |
6 |
1533 |
We highly recommend cork screenings for wines aged at least 45 years. |
1.2500 |
0.04944 |
108 |
85 |
19 |
4 |
1534 |
Oh quit your whining… |
1.2500 |
0.05038 |
92 |
71 |
19 |
2 |
1535 |
I'm told you're having a problem with gas. |
1.2500 |
0.05152 |
112 |
90 |
16 |
6 |
1536 |
Let’s get this party started, shall we? |
1.2500 |
0.05389 |
100 |
80 |
15 |
5 |
1537 |
I hope you did a good prep” |
1.2500 |
0.05883 |
88 |
71 |
12 |
5 |
1538 |
I suggest you open up about it. Perhaps with someone who likes you for you. |
1.2500 |
0.05592 |
104 |
85 |
12 |
7 |
1539 |
OK,let's see if I agree with "Dr. Wine Spectator's" diagnosis..... |
1.2500 |
0.05198 |
100 |
79 |
17 |
4 |
1540 |
Just down a little wine beforehand and you'll be feeling no pain. |
1.2500 |
0.06289 |
80 |
65 |
10 |
5 |
1541 |
Don't worry, once I remove the blockage, I'll replace it with a screw top. |
1.2500 |
0.04879 |
104 |
81 |
20 |
3 |
1542 |
Or we can send a home test and you can do it yourself! |
1.2500 |
0.04830 |
112 |
88 |
20 |
4 |
1543 |
We have a new treatment for your condition that's really a corker. |
1.2500 |
0.05283 |
108 |
87 |
15 |
6 |
1544 |
When you hear a pop, feel free to let out a little whine. |
1.2500 |
0.04684 |
104 |
80 |
22 |
2 |
1545 |
I have to warn you,this is going to hurt a bit! |
1.2500 |
0.06033 |
80 |
64 |
12 |
4 |
1546 |
You can stop maturing now. |
1.2500 |
0.05130 |
96 |
75 |
18 |
3 |
1547 |
Don’t worry.I’ll let you breathe. |
1.2500 |
0.04484 |
112 |
86 |
24 |
2 |
1548 |
The tipsier I am, the better I perform. |
1.2500 |
0.05198 |
100 |
79 |
17 |
4 |
1549 |
I’m open to suggestions! |
1.2500 |
0.05339 |
96 |
76 |
16 |
4 |
1550 |
Don’t worry about the procedure, I’ll examine you tastefully. |
1.2500 |
0.06289 |
80 |
65 |
10 |
5 |
1551 |
You might hear a slight popping sound. |
1.2500 |
0.05270 |
92 |
72 |
17 |
3 |
1552 |
A frontal lobotomy... I mean a bottle in front of me. Why, yes. Let's have a look. |
1.2500 |
0.05657 |
88 |
70 |
14 |
4 |
1553 |
Frankly I don’t care what your rating is. Table 33 has asked for you to be fully decanted. |
1.2500 |
0.06536 |
80 |
66 |
8 |
6 |
1554 |
And your insurance covers the corkage charge! |
1.2500 |
0.04766 |
108 |
84 |
21 |
3 |
1555 |
I need you to open up. |
1.2481 |
0.04267 |
129 |
100 |
26 |
3 |
1556 |
You're going to get screwed |
1.2480 |
0.04773 |
125 |
100 |
19 |
6 |
1557 |
You’re not getting screwed….This is a fulfillment of your life’s work! |
1.2479 |
0.04588 |
121 |
95 |
22 |
4 |
1558 |
It's a completely normal procedure for an Vintage 1975. |
1.2479 |
0.04687 |
117 |
92 |
21 |
4 |
1559 |
Bend over. This won't hurt a bit. |
1.2478 |
0.04792 |
113 |
89 |
20 |
4 |
1560 |
bend over we need to let it breath it will be over before you know it |
1.2478 |
0.04792 |
113 |
89 |
20 |
4 |
1561 |
I have good news! You and your family are part of an intriguing new case study. |
1.2478 |
0.04954 |
113 |
90 |
18 |
5 |
1562 |
Mind if I check your tannins? |
1.2477 |
0.04544 |
109 |
84 |
23 |
2 |
1563 |
The good news is that you're perfectly healthy. The bad news is that I have to remove your sulfates in the morning. |
1.2477 |
0.05074 |
109 |
87 |
17 |
5 |
1564 |
Finally my love of practicing medicine and drinking wine have morphed into one. |
1.2477 |
0.04904 |
109 |
86 |
19 |
4 |
1565 |
Your condition is very common to bottled wine. I’ve got just the thing for it! |
1.2477 |
0.04728 |
109 |
85 |
21 |
3 |
1566 |
I am confident that this will finally fix your chronic headaches. |
1.2476 |
0.05024 |
105 |
83 |
18 |
4 |
1567 |
This would be easier if you were a screw top. |
1.2476 |
0.05024 |
105 |
83 |
18 |
4 |
1568 |
What you’ll feel is technically not pain, just intense pressure |
1.2476 |
0.04838 |
105 |
82 |
20 |
3 |
1569 |
"Well, aren't you an impertinent little red!" |
1.2475 |
0.04956 |
101 |
79 |
19 |
3 |
1570 |
Yes, you've aged well. That's exactly why we do this exam. |
1.2475 |
0.05341 |
101 |
81 |
15 |
5 |
1571 |
Trust me, I'm a sommelier. |
1.2475 |
0.05152 |
101 |
80 |
17 |
4 |
1572 |
At your vintage annual checkups get a little more involved. |
1.2475 |
0.05152 |
101 |
80 |
17 |
4 |
1573 |
I assure you, there are no pain receptors in the cork. |
1.2475 |
0.05341 |
101 |
81 |
15 |
5 |
1574 |
Relax. You have a large cork and I will be very gentle with my corkscrew. |
1.2475 |
0.05152 |
101 |
80 |
17 |
4 |
1575 |
So you're having trouble breathing? |
1.2475 |
0.04752 |
101 |
78 |
21 |
2 |
1576 |
It's just gas...it'll pass! |
1.2475 |
0.05152 |
101 |
80 |
17 |
4 |
1577 |
Come on,you mean you never been screwed before? |
1.2475 |
0.05152 |
101 |
80 |
17 |
4 |
1578 |
Based on your exam, it looks you need glasses. |
1.2475 |
0.05152 |
101 |
80 |
17 |
4 |
1579 |
Ready for your big day ? |
1.2475 |
0.05152 |
101 |
80 |
17 |
4 |
1580 |
Now that I have a bottle in front of me, I will be performing a frontal lobotomy |
1.2475 |
0.04956 |
101 |
79 |
19 |
3 |
1581 |
A sampling? I thought you were just going to take my temperature. |
1.2475 |
0.04752 |
101 |
78 |
21 |
2 |
1582 |
I need to let off a little pressure to get rid of your headache. |
1.2474 |
0.04867 |
97 |
75 |
20 |
2 |
1583 |
No need to worry! This is a routine procedure once you reach a certain age. |
1.2474 |
0.05682 |
97 |
79 |
12 |
6 |
1584 |
You'll feel a little pinch, but don't worry,
I've done this hundreds of times. |
1.2474 |
0.05083 |
97 |
76 |
18 |
3 |
1585 |
You had some questions about the case study? |
1.2474 |
0.04867 |
97 |
75 |
20 |
2 |
1586 |
Okay. Just breathe. |
1.2474 |
0.05290 |
97 |
77 |
16 |
4 |
1587 |
Good news, your corkage fee is covered. |
1.2474 |
0.05290 |
97 |
77 |
16 |
4 |
1588 |
It’s either this or a tube down your throat. |
1.2473 |
0.05439 |
93 |
74 |
15 |
4 |
1589 |
This won’t hurt a bit It will just relieve the pressure and some of my - er - your! stress. |
1.2473 |
0.04991 |
93 |
72 |
19 |
2 |
1590 |
Wine Bottle: I have a feeling I'm about to get screwed in this deal. |
1.2473 |
0.05853 |
93 |
76 |
11 |
6 |
1591 |
This is really going to pop your cork! |
1.2473 |
0.05220 |
93 |
73 |
17 |
3 |
1592 |
Relax. Think of it as a celebration of your fine vintage, not as a final pour. |
1.2472 |
0.05367 |
89 |
70 |
16 |
3 |
1593 |
It's just an obstruction, easily removed right here and now. |
1.2472 |
0.05600 |
89 |
71 |
14 |
4 |
1594 |
Great news! It’s just a minor blockage. |
1.2472 |
0.05600 |
89 |
71 |
14 |
4 |
1595 |
Yes, Ms Winegarden, you ARE impacted. But the good news is that we have a foolproof treatment. |
1.2472 |
0.05824 |
89 |
72 |
12 |
5 |
1596 |
Your HMO has a very simple procedure to deal with that blockage. |
1.2472 |
0.05367 |
89 |
70 |
16 |
3 |
1597 |
She asked me to demonstrate an effective breathing technique |
1.2472 |
0.05824 |
89 |
72 |
12 |
5 |
1598 |
Relax, This won’t hurt much. |
1.2471 |
0.05775 |
85 |
68 |
13 |
4 |
1599 |
It's painless, but it may leave you with an empty feeling" |
1.2471 |
0.05268 |
85 |
66 |
17 |
2 |
1600 |
Sooooo... I'm not so sure I agree with you that Doctors are the only ones getting screwed by the government these days! |
1.2471 |
0.06013 |
85 |
69 |
11 |
5 |
1601 |
I'm going to reduce the swelling in your cork. There'll be a pop, then relief. |
1.2468 |
0.05594 |
77 |
60 |
15 |
2 |
1602 |
Not to worry, it's much easier than a colonoscopy. |
1.2460 |
0.04319 |
126 |
98 |
25 |
3 |
1603 |
Lucky for you, I perform this procedure nightly. |
1.2458 |
0.04953 |
118 |
95 |
17 |
6 |
1604 |
This procedure should help you breathe |
1.2458 |
0.04953 |
118 |
95 |
17 |
6 |
1605 |
"Trust me. Soon, you'll breathe like never before!" |
1.2456 |
0.04915 |
114 |
91 |
18 |
5 |
1606 |
Let's just take a little look, shall we?" |
1.2456 |
0.05071 |
114 |
92 |
16 |
6 |
1607 |
Don't worry, I'm in your HMO |
1.2455 |
0.05033 |
110 |
88 |
17 |
5 |
1608 |
On the bright side, we might get an A&E series out of this. |
1.2455 |
0.05196 |
110 |
89 |
15 |
6 |
1609 |
It was a bad year. No matter what, you're screwed. |
1.2455 |
0.05033 |
110 |
88 |
17 |
5 |
1610 |
You may need a shot after this. |
1.2455 |
0.04865 |
110 |
87 |
19 |
4 |
1611 |
Sounds like some fresh air may help. |
1.2455 |
0.04509 |
110 |
85 |
23 |
2 |
1612 |
I assure you, I studied at the finest school in Bordeaux. |
1.2453 |
0.05159 |
106 |
85 |
16 |
5 |
1613 |
If we're unable to get everything out, we'll close you up, put you in the refrigerator, and try again tomorrow. |
1.2453 |
0.05330 |
106 |
86 |
14 |
6 |
1614 |
I promise, YOU won't feel a thing. |
1.2453 |
0.04982 |
106 |
84 |
18 |
4 |
1615 |
You look sad. Let's uncork you and double-check for sour grapes. |
1.2453 |
0.05159 |
106 |
85 |
16 |
5 |
1616 |
Sorry, but I have to test for cork taint. |
1.2453 |
0.04798 |
106 |
83 |
20 |
3 |
1617 |
You’ll be allowed to breathe for a few minutes after the procedure. |
1.2453 |
0.04982 |
106 |
84 |
18 |
4 |
1618 |
I know you feel bottled up, but this will help you breathe. |
1.2453 |
0.04798 |
106 |
83 |
20 |
3 |
1619 |
You may feel some slight pressure… |
1.2453 |
0.04982 |
106 |
84 |
18 |
4 |
1620 |
Relax. Just breathe. |
1.2451 |
0.04712 |
102 |
79 |
21 |
2 |
1621 |
I was told you need help breathing. |
1.2451 |
0.04914 |
102 |
80 |
19 |
3 |
1622 |
I think I can help you breathe easier… |
1.2451 |
0.05107 |
102 |
81 |
17 |
4 |
1623 |
Now you might feel a slight prick. |
1.2449 |
0.04824 |
98 |
76 |
20 |
2 |
1624 |
No, you're not screwed at all! |
1.2449 |
0.05037 |
98 |
77 |
18 |
3 |
1625 |
Let's relieve some pressure. |
1.2449 |
0.05439 |
98 |
79 |
14 |
5 |
1626 |
You're lucky I'm not a proctologist! |
1.2449 |
0.05439 |
98 |
79 |
14 |
5 |
1627 |
Relax. This should ease some of the pressure you’re feeling. |
1.2449 |
0.05242 |
98 |
78 |
16 |
4 |
1628 |
Tip your neck and pop for me, please! |
1.2449 |
0.04824 |
98 |
76 |
20 |
2 |
1629 |
Just relax. I have a procedure in mind that will help you breathe more easily. |
1.2449 |
0.04601 |
98 |
75 |
22 |
1 |
1630 |
This will relieve the pressure. |
1.2447 |
0.05171 |
94 |
74 |
17 |
3 |
1631 |
You have an exquisite yet uncomplicated nose. |
1.2447 |
0.04944 |
94 |
73 |
19 |
2 |
1632 |
No worries. I promise not to screw this up. |
1.2447 |
0.05387 |
94 |
75 |
15 |
4 |
1633 |
The good news is that it only hurts in a clockwise direction. |
1.2447 |
0.05796 |
94 |
77 |
11 |
6 |
1634 |
Relax. It won’t get anywhere near your cork. |
1.2447 |
0.05171 |
94 |
74 |
17 |
3 |
1635 |
Trust me, you'll breathe a lot easier after this procedure. |
1.2447 |
0.05171 |
94 |
74 |
17 |
3 |
1636 |
You might feel a little pop with this one. |
1.2444 |
0.05074 |
90 |
70 |
18 |
2 |
1637 |
Don't worry, I hit many a bottle in completing my fellowship in Pinot-ology. |
1.2444 |
0.05314 |
90 |
71 |
16 |
3 |
1638 |
I've done this at home but never bat work |
1.2442 |
0.05214 |
86 |
67 |
17 |
2 |
1639 |
You say you were born in 1982? And you pronounce your name Chateau Lafite? |
1.2442 |
0.05949 |
86 |
70 |
11 |
5 |
1640 |
Lie down on your right side, this won’t hurt, we do offer earplugs should you not want to hear anything |
1.2442 |
0.05715 |
86 |
69 |
13 |
4 |
1641 |
I think you’re aging very well, but I’d like to test your tannin level to be sure." |
1.2442 |
0.05470 |
86 |
68 |
15 |
3 |
1642 |
Open up and say...ahh! |
1.2442 |
0.05470 |
86 |
68 |
15 |
3 |
1643 |
You may feel some discomfort. |
1.2442 |
0.05214 |
86 |
67 |
17 |
2 |
1644 |
This will relieve the pressure you've been keeping bottled up inside. |
1.2442 |
0.05470 |
86 |
68 |
15 |
3 |
1645 |
You may feel a little tug. |
1.2439 |
0.05366 |
82 |
64 |
16 |
2 |
1646 |
Have you ever secretly fantasized about being uncorked? |
1.2439 |
0.04522 |
123 |
97 |
22 |
4 |
1647 |
You may feel just a slight amount of pressure. |
1.2439 |
0.06150 |
82 |
67 |
10 |
5 |
1648 |
I just need to take a small sample to send to the lab for tasting--I mean testing. |
1.2437 |
0.04460 |
119 |
93 |
23 |
3 |
1649 |
Every bottle of your vintage needs to get one. |
1.2437 |
0.05059 |
119 |
97 |
15 |
7 |
1650 |
It's quick office procedure, but you'll be able to breathe afterwards. |
1.2437 |
0.04769 |
119 |
95 |
19 |
5 |
1651 |
We have the newest technology! This will be over before you know it. |
1.2435 |
0.04553 |
115 |
90 |
22 |
3 |
1652 |
It's time to see just how amusing, yet seriously full-bodied you really are. |
1.2435 |
0.05326 |
115 |
95 |
12 |
8 |
1653 |
Why yes, today is a special occasion. |
1.2432 |
0.04653 |
111 |
87 |
21 |
3 |
1654 |
If you think this is going to screw you, wait till you see the bill. |
1.2432 |
0.04286 |
111 |
85 |
25 |
1 |
1655 |
This is going to blow your mind. |
1.2432 |
0.05154 |
111 |
90 |
15 |
6 |
1656 |
I’ll start by exploring your body. |
1.2430 |
0.04372 |
107 |
82 |
24 |
1 |
1657 |
No, you're not screwed...yet. |
1.2430 |
0.05285 |
107 |
87 |
14 |
6 |
1658 |
Please Doctor, I need more time; I'm barrel aged. |
1.2430 |
0.04940 |
107 |
85 |
18 |
4 |
1659 |
I'm from the government and I'm here to help you. |
1.2427 |
0.05426 |
103 |
84 |
13 |
6 |
1660 |
First, the good news--we don't charge a corkage fee. |
1.2427 |
0.05248 |
103 |
83 |
15 |
5 |
1661 |
It may hurt for a moment, but you'll breathe so much better after the procedure |
1.2427 |
0.04672 |
103 |
80 |
21 |
2 |
1662 |
We'll get to the bottom of this, no matter how long it takes, |
1.2427 |
0.05063 |
103 |
82 |
17 |
4 |
1663 |
No worries! I'll just be checking for any impurities. |
1.2427 |
0.04871 |
103 |
81 |
19 |
3 |
1664 |
Hey, at least it's not a colonoscopy. |
1.2427 |
0.04672 |
103 |
80 |
21 |
2 |
1665 |
Of course I don’t take pleasure in this, that’s not why I’m a surgeon |
1.2427 |
0.04871 |
103 |
81 |
19 |
3 |
1666 |
I promise. Just a tiny pinch and you'll be screwed. |
1.2424 |
0.05390 |
99 |
80 |
14 |
5 |
1667 |
I just need. to see your legs |
1.2424 |
0.05195 |
99 |
79 |
16 |
4 |
1668 |
you're coming home with me |
1.2424 |
0.05195 |
99 |
79 |
16 |
4 |
1669 |
The irony is we need to remove it to prove you're full bodied. |
1.2422 |
0.04259 |
128 |
100 |
25 |
3 |
1670 |
'My records indicate it's time for your bleu shot.' |
1.2421 |
0.05337 |
95 |
76 |
15 |
4 |
1671 |
They say "you can't find happiness at the bottom of a bottle"... but I'm a pediatrician, not a psychiatrist. |
1.2421 |
0.05337 |
95 |
76 |
15 |
4 |
1672 |
When all you have is a corkscrew, every problem seems like a cork. |
1.2421 |
0.05122 |
95 |
75 |
17 |
3 |
1673 |
You should already be numb. |
1.2421 |
0.05542 |
95 |
77 |
13 |
5 |
1674 |
I've never had the chance to go in from the top before. |
1.2421 |
0.05122 |
95 |
75 |
17 |
3 |
1675 |
‘Veritas vos liberat.’ But since you’re a California wine, I’ll translate. ‘The truth will set you free.’ Now bend over! |
1.2421 |
0.05542 |
95 |
77 |
13 |
5 |
1676 |
Let’s get to know each other better, shall we? |
1.2421 |
0.05122 |
95 |
75 |
17 |
3 |
1677 |
Looks like your insurance doesn’t cover the noninvasive procedure. |
1.2421 |
0.04899 |
95 |
74 |
19 |
2 |
1678 |
Would you like to screw? |
1.2419 |
0.04490 |
124 |
98 |
22 |
4 |
1679 |
The nurse said you had a look of terror on your face, but I explained that it’s actually ‘terroir’. |
1.2419 |
0.04908 |
124 |
101 |
16 |
7 |
1680 |
What a coincidence! I asked for a bottle in front of me and you asked for a frontal lobotomy. |
1.2418 |
0.05708 |
91 |
74 |
12 |
5 |
1681 |
This procedure will feel the same as getting my bill. |
1.2418 |
0.05263 |
91 |
72 |
16 |
3 |
1682 |
I need proof of your blood type. |
1.2418 |
0.05263 |
91 |
72 |
16 |
3 |
1683 |
I understand you’re a little stopped up. |
1.2418 |
0.05025 |
91 |
71 |
18 |
2 |
1684 |
I’ve had some whiny patients but this is ridiculous! |
1.2418 |
0.05025 |
91 |
71 |
18 |
2 |
1685 |
We only need a small sample-you don’t need to fill up the whole cup. |
1.2418 |
0.05263 |
91 |
72 |
16 |
3 |
1686 |
No wonder you look so red and feeling stuffed . Might do you well to open up now. |
1.2418 |
0.05708 |
91 |
74 |
12 |
5 |
1687 |
Is there any chance you could be pregnant? |
1.2417 |
0.04879 |
120 |
97 |
17 |
6 |
1688 |
You'll have the same great taste, and be less filling. |
1.2417 |
0.05020 |
120 |
98 |
15 |
7 |
1689 |
I have a sure cure for your stopped up feeling. |
1.2417 |
0.04427 |
120 |
94 |
23 |
3 |
1690 |
Happy to say there's no need for colonoscopy. |
1.2414 |
0.04839 |
116 |
93 |
18 |
5 |
1691 |
Just remember to breathe. |
1.2414 |
0.05414 |
87 |
69 |
15 |
3 |
1692 |
It's not going to hurt . I use vocal anesthesia |
1.2414 |
0.05414 |
87 |
69 |
15 |
3 |
1693 |
Don’t get the wrong idea. First I will slit your neck. |
1.2414 |
0.05414 |
87 |
69 |
15 |
3 |
1694 |
The Good News - I can help you lose that weight! |
1.2414 |
0.04350 |
116 |
90 |
24 |
2 |
1695 |
Not to worry. This little tool will help you breathe easier. |
1.2411 |
0.04952 |
112 |
90 |
17 |
5 |
1696 |
We'll get rid of that blockage- but first, close your eyes. |
1.2411 |
0.04952 |
112 |
90 |
17 |
5 |
1697 |
I promise you won't even feel it. |
1.2411 |
0.04438 |
112 |
87 |
23 |
2 |
1698 |
A virgin? At your age? |
1.2411 |
0.05112 |
112 |
91 |
15 |
6 |
1699 |
This low-risk procedure will help you breathe better. |
1.2411 |
0.04952 |
112 |
90 |
17 |
5 |
1700 |
Relax. We’re just going to do a minor extraction so you can breathe |
1.2411 |
0.04438 |
112 |
87 |
23 |
2 |
1701 |
Rest assured, I’ve done this many, many times. |
1.2410 |
0.05579 |
83 |
66 |
14 |
3 |
1702 |
It would be quicker if you were a screwtop |
1.2410 |
0.05836 |
83 |
67 |
12 |
4 |
1703 |
Everyone in my department has volunteered to help analyze the results of your exploratory surgery. |
1.2410 |
0.05579 |
83 |
66 |
14 |
3 |
1704 |
Just a minor procedure… and then I’ll tell you how I’m feeling in the morning. |
1.2407 |
0.04337 |
108 |
83 |
24 |
1 |
1705 |
Don't worry, all you'll feel is a little corkscrew. |
1.2407 |
0.05073 |
108 |
87 |
16 |
5 |
1706 |
Trouble breathing? Trust me; I know just what to do. |
1.2405 |
0.05758 |
79 |
63 |
13 |
3 |
1707 |
You know the drill.” |
1.2405 |
0.05758 |
79 |
63 |
13 |
3 |
1708 |
I need to take a sample...for medicinal purposes. |
1.2404 |
0.05020 |
104 |
83 |
17 |
4 |
1709 |
Don't be alarmed, Mr. Merlot, it's just a quick twist to help your inner notes flourish. |
1.2404 |
0.05020 |
104 |
83 |
17 |
4 |
1710 |
'Open your mouth, please.' |
1.2404 |
0.04427 |
104 |
80 |
23 |
1 |
1711 |
Let's get you opened up. |
1.2400 |
0.04948 |
100 |
79 |
18 |
3 |
1712 |
The tests are clear. It will all have to come out. |
1.2400 |
0.05148 |
100 |
80 |
16 |
4 |
1713 |
I guess I could give you a local first, but I don't want to disturb the tannins. |
1.2400 |
0.04948 |
100 |
79 |
18 |
3 |
1714 |
The good news is you're still in your prime. |
1.2400 |
0.04740 |
100 |
78 |
20 |
2 |
1715 |
You'll feel much better once the pressure is equalized! |
1.2400 |
0.04740 |
100 |
78 |
20 |
2 |
1716 |
The good news is, you're perfect, the bad news is, it's Dr's Hatchers retirement party tonight." |
1.2400 |
0.05341 |
100 |
81 |
14 |
5 |
1717 |
Believe me, this will help you breath |
1.2400 |
0.04948 |
100 |
79 |
18 |
3 |
1718 |
Don’t worry you’ll only feel a little pressure. |
1.2400 |
0.04948 |
100 |
79 |
18 |
3 |
1719 |
You’ll feel a slight pinch, and then I’ll feel all better |
1.2400 |
0.04522 |
100 |
77 |
22 |
1 |
1720 |
No need to worry, this is the procedure I often use to help with fluid retention issues. |
1.2400 |
0.05148 |
100 |
80 |
16 |
4 |
1721 |
That doesn't look like my Covid shot to me! |
1.2396 |
0.05287 |
96 |
77 |
15 |
4 |
1722 |
Wine makes good blood" , the doctor tells the bottle |
1.2396 |
0.05287 |
96 |
77 |
15 |
4 |
1723 |
Ah Malbec, tannins again. What say we extract a few milliliters and rid you of those pesky invaders once and for all. |
1.2396 |
0.05075 |
96 |
76 |
17 |
3 |
1724 |
This next test is recommended when you reach this aged. |
1.2396 |
0.05490 |
96 |
78 |
13 |
5 |
1725 |
...and then I'll ask you to cough. |
1.2396 |
0.05490 |
96 |
78 |
13 |
5 |
1726 |
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. But as for you, my friend. |
1.2391 |
0.05212 |
92 |
73 |
16 |
3 |
1727 |
So we just need a little sample for tasting - I mean, testing. |
1.2391 |
0.05436 |
92 |
74 |
14 |
4 |
1728 |
Don't worry Mr. Merlot, you will just feel a pinch, some pressure and a small pop. |
1.2391 |
0.05436 |
92 |
74 |
14 |
4 |
1729 |
I have grape news! |
1.2391 |
0.04731 |
92 |
71 |
20 |
1 |
1730 |
At your age, it’s important we make sure you can breathe. |
1.2391 |
0.05212 |
92 |
73 |
16 |
3 |
1731 |
I'm afraid it's consumption, and nothing can be done about it. |
1.2391 |
0.04731 |
92 |
71 |
20 |
1 |
1732 |
I'll need to send some routine lab tastes, I mean tests. |
1.2391 |
0.05212 |
92 |
73 |
16 |
3 |
1733 |
You might feel a slight pin prick. |
1.2391 |
0.05212 |
92 |
73 |
16 |
3 |
1734 |
You may feel a pit of pressure. |
1.2391 |
0.05859 |
92 |
76 |
10 |
6 |
1735 |
You are going you need to breathe for about an hour before I take a sample. |
1.2389 |
0.05071 |
113 |
92 |
15 |
6 |
1736 |
No, no, you're fine wine. I just think you need to breathe a little. |
1.2386 |
0.05598 |
88 |
71 |
13 |
4 |
1737 |
Relax, I've practically made a career doing this. |
1.2386 |
0.04847 |
88 |
68 |
19 |
1 |
1738 |
Look, your parents didn't send you to Napa for summer camp. |
1.2386 |
0.05359 |
88 |
70 |
15 |
3 |
1739 |
Just close your eyes and think of France. |
1.2386 |
0.05110 |
88 |
69 |
17 |
2 |
1740 |
I promise you’ll only feel a tiny prick! |
1.2386 |
0.05598 |
88 |
71 |
13 |
4 |
1741 |
I'm glad you came to me. Any other doctor might have thought you were a screw-top. |
1.2386 |
0.05359 |
88 |
70 |
15 |
3 |
1742 |
Since you're a beaujolais nouveau, I moved up your day of surgery. |
1.2386 |
0.05359 |
88 |
70 |
15 |
3 |
1743 |
You might have a bit of a headache after .. or I might! |
1.2386 |
0.04847 |
88 |
68 |
19 |
1 |
1744 |
This should take the pressure off, no worries |
1.2386 |
0.05359 |
88 |
70 |
15 |
3 |
1745 |
Don't worry. This procedure has been used for centuries and all parties have enjoyed the results. |
1.2385 |
0.04681 |
109 |
86 |
20 |
3 |
1746 |
I'll just need to run a few tastes...I mean TESTS! |
1.2385 |
0.04859 |
109 |
87 |
18 |
4 |
1747 |
Good news, you're in the "peak" of health. Bad news, I'm an alcoholic." |
1.2381 |
0.05773 |
84 |
68 |
12 |
4 |
1748 |
There are medications, but I recommend we try decanting... |
1.2381 |
0.05158 |
105 |
85 |
15 |
5 |
1749 |
You won't feel a thing |
1.2381 |
0.05773 |
84 |
68 |
12 |
4 |
1750 |
I have a screwy suggestion. |
1.2381 |
0.05253 |
84 |
66 |
16 |
2 |
1751 |
”Coilonoscopy |
1.2381 |
0.04594 |
105 |
82 |
21 |
2 |
1752 |
Cheer up my friend. I mastered this procedure my first week in med school. |
1.2381 |
0.05519 |
84 |
67 |
14 |
3 |
1753 |
I perform this procedure for special occasions. |
1.2381 |
0.04594 |
105 |
82 |
21 |
2 |
1754 |
This won’t hurt you as much as it will damage them |
1.2381 |
0.04789 |
105 |
83 |
19 |
3 |
1755 |
you will be able to breath much better after the procedure |
1.2376 |
0.04699 |
101 |
79 |
20 |
2 |
1756 |
I promise you will feel a sudden release of pressure as soon as I am done! |
1.2376 |
0.05293 |
101 |
82 |
14 |
5 |
1757 |
Don’t worry: in a little while none of us will feel any pain. |
1.2376 |
0.04699 |
101 |
79 |
20 |
2 |
1758 |
45 year port, you say? |
1.2376 |
0.05477 |
101 |
83 |
12 |
6 |
1759 |
A bottle a day keeps the doctor at bay |
1.2376 |
0.04905 |
101 |
80 |
18 |
3 |
1760 |
The good news is we have a solution for your congestion, the bad news…. |
1.2376 |
0.05293 |
101 |
82 |
14 |
5 |
1761 |
Don’t worry, this was my specialty in medical school. |
1.2375 |
0.05694 |
80 |
64 |
13 |
3 |
1762 |
Trust me. I do this to everyone I see. |
1.2375 |
0.05694 |
80 |
64 |
13 |
3 |
1763 |
Feeling all stopped up, are we? |
1.2375 |
0.05409 |
80 |
63 |
15 |
2 |
1764 |
First I'll remove the blockage and then I'll remove the toxins inside you. |
1.2375 |
0.05694 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
3 |
1765 |
You’re about to get totally screwed. |
1.2375 |
0.05409 |
80 |
63 |
15 |
2 |
1766 |
Think of it as a kind of constipation. Only more delicious. |
1.2375 |
0.05694 |
80 |
64 |
13 |
3 |
1767 |
Yes, yes, but we all need to breathe. |
1.2375 |
0.05694 |
80 |
64 |
13 |
3 |
1768 |
Don’t worry. Your headache will be gone in no time. |
1.2375 |
0.05108 |
80 |
62 |
17 |
1 |
1769 |
Yes I AM a proctologist and have I got a treat for You! |
1.2375 |
0.05694 |
80 |
64 |
13 |
3 |
1770 |
I believe I have something for your headache and my own. |
1.2371 |
0.05029 |
97 |
77 |
17 |
3 |
1771 |
Don't be a baby, its just a little prick. |
1.2371 |
0.05238 |
97 |
78 |
15 |
4 |
1772 |
Relax! It'll just help you breathe better. |
1.2371 |
0.05029 |
97 |
77 |
17 |
3 |
1773 |
Let's begin with a little exercise to open you up. |
1.2371 |
0.05029 |
97 |
77 |
17 |
3 |
1774 |
It’s finally coming true - I’m going to perform a frontal lobotomy on the bottle in front of me. |
1.2371 |
0.05633 |
97 |
80 |
11 |
6 |
1775 |
You'll just feel a tug. Promise. |
1.2368 |
0.05884 |
76 |
61 |
12 |
3 |
1776 |
Try thinking of it this way: YOUR life expectancy just doubled! |
1.2368 |
0.05578 |
76 |
60 |
14 |
2 |
1777 |
Believe me, it’s a lot better than a frontal lobotomy. |
1.2368 |
0.04712 |
114 |
91 |
19 |
4 |
1778 |
I promise it will blow your mind. |
1.2366 |
0.05162 |
93 |
74 |
16 |
3 |
1779 |
Look on the bright side. You've been paired." |
1.2366 |
0.05162 |
93 |
74 |
16 |
3 |
1780 |
Well, yes. It’s kind of like an enema. |
1.2366 |
0.05162 |
93 |
74 |
16 |
3 |
1781 |
Don't worry. I'm well-versed in this procedure. I just got back from a symposium in the Napa Valley. |
1.2366 |
0.05596 |
93 |
76 |
12 |
5 |
1782 |
Wait! I don't have insurance. What's your corkage fee? |
1.2366 |
0.05383 |
93 |
75 |
14 |
4 |
1783 |
Don’t worry, we’ll seal you in a plastic bag for the ride home. |
1.2366 |
0.05383 |
93 |
75 |
14 |
4 |
1784 |
I'm going to do you a good turn. |
1.2366 |
0.05383 |
93 |
75 |
14 |
4 |
1785 |
Not to worry. This is a routine procedure. |
1.2364 |
0.04990 |
110 |
89 |
16 |
5 |
1786 |
It depends on how you define mildly invasive. |
1.2364 |
0.04820 |
110 |
88 |
18 |
4 |
1787 |
For a vintage such as yours, we’ll need to test a few samples. |
1.2364 |
0.04990 |
110 |
89 |
16 |
5 |
1788 |
You’ll be feeling bubbly in no time.” |
1.2360 |
0.05541 |
89 |
72 |
13 |
4 |
1789 |
Don't worry, it's a routine procedure at your age |
1.2360 |
0.05305 |
89 |
71 |
15 |
3 |
1790 |
It's called a corkonoscopy. |
1.2360 |
0.04800 |
89 |
69 |
19 |
1 |
1791 |
A bad headache in the morning is likely but won’t feel a thing tonight. |
1.2360 |
0.05305 |
89 |
71 |
15 |
3 |
1792 |
Unfortunately, this is the only procedure your insurance will cover. |
1.2360 |
0.05305 |
89 |
71 |
15 |
3 |
1793 |
It’s like arthroscopic surgery, but with a twist. |
1.2360 |
0.05541 |
89 |
72 |
13 |
4 |
1794 |
The procedure will be painless and you will be able to really breathe.
Then I'd like you to join me and a friend for dinner. |
1.2360 |
0.05767 |
89 |
73 |
11 |
5 |
1795 |
you said something it was something about your legs? |
1.2360 |
0.05305 |
89 |
71 |
15 |
3 |
1796 |
No need to worry, the procedure is simple. The hard part was getting the oversized novelty wine glasses into the OR. |
1.2360 |
0.05305 |
89 |
71 |
15 |
3 |
1797 |
Don't be nervous. Think of the number of lives you're going to save. |
1.2358 |
0.05114 |
106 |
86 |
15 |
5 |
1798 |
Relax! I just want to take a small sample. |
1.2358 |
0.04935 |
106 |
85 |
17 |
4 |
1799 |
This should take the pressure off your head ache. |
1.2353 |
0.04445 |
102 |
79 |
22 |
1 |
1800 |
This will hurt you more than it will me. |
1.2353 |
0.04862 |
102 |
81 |
18 |
3 |
1801 |
What did you say your age was again? |
1.2353 |
0.04862 |
102 |
81 |
18 |
3 |
1802 |
I promise, you are not getting screwed here! |
1.2353 |
0.05712 |
85 |
69 |
12 |
4 |
1803 |
Trust me. Life does this to all of us. |
1.2353 |
0.04658 |
102 |
80 |
20 |
2 |
1804 |
It’s a simple procedure I like to call a lobottlemy. |
1.2353 |
0.05198 |
85 |
67 |
16 |
2 |
1805 |
Given your middling vintage and provenance, a second opinion is not needed. |
1.2353 |
0.05712 |
85 |
69 |
12 |
4 |
1806 |
Trust me, I would never screw you. |
1.2353 |
0.05461 |
85 |
68 |
14 |
3 |
1807 |
Sure, there is a blood test, but I prefer the more traditional approach. |
1.2353 |
0.05246 |
102 |
83 |
14 |
5 |
1808 |
I need you to turn your cork and cough. |
1.2353 |
0.04445 |
102 |
79 |
22 |
1 |
1809 |
I assure you, the procedure won't hurt a bit. |
1.2353 |
0.05058 |
102 |
82 |
16 |
4 |
1810 |
Just look down and cough for me. |
1.2353 |
0.04922 |
85 |
66 |
18 |
1 |
1811 |
The corkage fee - er,co-pay is $25 |
1.2353 |
0.05428 |
102 |
84 |
12 |
6 |
1812 |
Just gonna take a little off the top |
1.2353 |
0.04445 |
102 |
79 |
22 |
1 |
1813 |
I thought an oenologist was a wine doctor! |
1.2353 |
0.04862 |
102 |
81 |
18 |
3 |
1814 |
Craniotomy a well-established procedure to relieve pressure and increase oxygen saturation. |
1.2348 |
0.04991 |
115 |
94 |
15 |
6 |
1815 |
So what your saying doc, is that no matter what I do, I’m screwed |
1.2348 |
0.04676 |
115 |
92 |
19 |
4 |
1816 |
"This simple procedure will tell us if tannic acid is your problem." |
1.2347 |
0.04983 |
98 |
78 |
17 |
3 |
1817 |
This will screw me up more than you. |
1.2347 |
0.05190 |
98 |
79 |
15 |
4 |
1818 |
It stings at first, but after a few sips I should be fine |
1.2347 |
0.04983 |
98 |
78 |
17 |
3 |
1819 |
Don't worry, I've done this before. You'll be empty in no time |
1.2347 |
0.04983 |
98 |
78 |
17 |
3 |
1820 |
Well hello again, Jim! I was delighted to see your name on my schedule for 5 o’clock. |
1.2347 |
0.05190 |
98 |
79 |
15 |
4 |
1821 |
You have nothing to worry about. I never drink on the job. |
1.2346 |
0.05630 |
81 |
65 |
13 |
3 |
1822 |
Now , Mr. Lottlebottle, THIS won't hurt Y O U at AALLL |
1.2346 |
0.05349 |
81 |
64 |
15 |
2 |
1823 |
Great news! You know that pressure you felt building...? |
1.2346 |
0.05349 |
81 |
64 |
15 |
2 |
1824 |
Yes, it's a simple procedure to relive the pressure you are feeling. |
1.2346 |
0.05898 |
81 |
66 |
11 |
4 |
1825 |
This might seem a little invasive but I promise it’’ll help you breathe… |
1.2342 |
0.04607 |
111 |
88 |
20 |
3 |
1826 |
Now close your eyes, and just breathe. |
1.2340 |
0.05745 |
94 |
78 |
10 |
6 |
1827 |
Ready for your colonoscopy, Mr. Vino? |
1.2340 |
0.05542 |
94 |
77 |
12 |
5 |
1828 |
This doesn't augur well |
1.2340 |
0.05332 |
94 |
76 |
14 |
4 |
1829 |
« The older you get,the better you are ! » |
1.2340 |
0.04884 |
94 |
74 |
18 |
2 |
1830 |
Just close your eyes and I'll get you uncorked. |
1.2340 |
0.05113 |
94 |
75 |
16 |
3 |
1831 |
We can’t know what we’re dealing with until I open you up. |
1.2340 |
0.04884 |
94 |
74 |
18 |
2 |
1832 |
Lobottlemies are nothing to be scared of Mr. Noir, this technique is just slightly more direct |
1.2340 |
0.05332 |
94 |
76 |
14 |
4 |
1833 |
Drink no wine before it's time" Well, it's your time big boy |
1.2338 |
0.06102 |
77 |
63 |
10 |
4 |
1834 |
Afterwards you can rest in the cheese ward. |
1.2338 |
0.04855 |
77 |
59 |
18 |
0 |
1835 |
I'll screw you if I can then drink you! |
1.2338 |
0.05514 |
77 |
61 |
14 |
2 |
1836 |
The good news is you'll finally get out of the cellar. |
1.2338 |
0.06376 |
77 |
64 |
8 |
5 |
1837 |
You know, sometimes nothing beats the good ol' fashioned way to help you breathe your best! You'll be feeling balanced in no time! |
1.2336 |
0.04893 |
107 |
86 |
17 |
4 |
1838 |
In a moment you’re going to feel a little pressure… |
1.2336 |
0.04893 |
107 |
86 |
17 |
4 |
1839 |
Your psychiatrist and I agree; its time for you to open up. |
1.2333 |
0.05923 |
90 |
75 |
9 |
6 |
1840 |
The good news is you don't have to see a proctologist. |
1.2333 |
0.05009 |
90 |
71 |
17 |
2 |
1841 |
This won't hurt nearly as much as my corkage fee, ha ha ha. |
1.2333 |
0.05009 |
90 |
71 |
17 |
2 |
1842 |
It's easier than a colonoscopy. |
1.2333 |
0.05253 |
90 |
72 |
15 |
3 |
1843 |
Is it safe? |
1.2333 |
0.05485 |
90 |
73 |
13 |
4 |
1844 |
Many of my patients live long productive lives without their corks. |
1.2333 |
0.05253 |
90 |
72 |
15 |
3 |
1845 |
Doc, are you trying to screw me? |
1.2333 |
0.05253 |
90 |
72 |
15 |
3 |
1846 |
It's a new procedure I developed. I'm gonna have to "bottlomize" you. |
1.2331 |
0.04386 |
133 |
107 |
21 |
5 |
1847 |
This is a common procedure for your age. |
1.2330 |
0.05200 |
103 |
84 |
14 |
5 |
1848 |
There's really not a dignified way to do this. Try to relax |
1.2330 |
0.05200 |
103 |
84 |
14 |
5 |
1849 |
I can help you breathe better. |
1.2330 |
0.04820 |
103 |
82 |
18 |
3 |
1850 |
''Want to hear a corker?" |
1.2330 |
0.05014 |
103 |
83 |
16 |
4 |
1851 |
You will find it much easier to breathe after the procedure is completed |
1.2330 |
0.05200 |
103 |
84 |
14 |
5 |
1852 |
I promise you'll enjoy the POP and you'll be able to breath! |
1.2330 |
0.05200 |
103 |
84 |
14 |
5 |
1853 |
Don't worry, this is an outpatient procedure that I have performed countless times. And you won't feel a thing! |
1.2330 |
0.05014 |
103 |
83 |
16 |
4 |
1854 |
You’ll just feel a little stick. |
1.2330 |
0.04820 |
103 |
82 |
18 |
3 |
1855 |
Once that cork is loosened, we’ll both be happy! |
1.2330 |
0.05014 |
103 |
83 |
16 |
4 |
1856 |
Once you have your new screw cap, you won’t remember a thing. |
1.2330 |
0.04618 |
103 |
81 |
20 |
2 |
1857 |
Just relax, I can see you’re the type who thinks the glass is half empty |
1.2329 |
0.06327 |
73 |
60 |
9 |
4 |
1858 |
And afterward we’ll insert a model sailing ship so that you never have to go through this again! |
1.2328 |
0.04798 |
116 |
94 |
17 |
5 |
1859 |
WE JUST NEED TO CHECK FOR SEDIMENT |
1.2326 |
0.05404 |
86 |
69 |
14 |
3 |
1860 |
I see your file says you were born in a particularly good year. |
1.2326 |
0.05404 |
86 |
69 |
14 |
3 |
1861 |
I have a solution to that anxiety you're bottling up. |
1.2326 |
0.05889 |
86 |
71 |
10 |
5 |
1862 |
Your first colonoscopy, M. Claret? |
1.2326 |
0.05145 |
86 |
68 |
16 |
2 |
1863 |
Margaret, push back my 10 o'clock with Ms Coffee would you?" |
1.2326 |
0.05404 |
86 |
69 |
14 |
3 |
1864 |
Just think of it as your last COVID stick! |
1.2326 |
0.05652 |
86 |
70 |
12 |
4 |
1865 |
The decapitation is over in 20 seconds , but you may continue to breathe for about an hour. |
1.2326 |
0.05404 |
86 |
69 |
14 |
3 |
1866 |
You're constipated ... I can fix that! |
1.2326 |
0.05404 |
86 |
69 |
14 |
3 |
1867 |
So I've got something here that I think will help you breathe. |
1.2326 |
0.04582 |
86 |
66 |
20 |
0 |
1868 |
I understand you’re having trouble with your breathing |
1.2326 |
0.05145 |
86 |
68 |
16 |
2 |
1869 |
Dont worry, after we take care of the problem in your neck you’ll have the legs you always dreamed of. |
1.2326 |
0.05889 |
86 |
71 |
10 |
5 |
1870 |
I have just the remedy for both of us. |
1.2326 |
0.05145 |
86 |
68 |
16 |
2 |
1871 |
You are my first Bordeaux |
1.2326 |
0.05404 |
86 |
69 |
14 |
3 |
1872 |
CHEERS! |
1.2326 |
0.05404 |
86 |
69 |
14 |
3 |
1873 |
Once we get this cork out I'll feel much better delivering the bad news. |
1.2326 |
0.04582 |
86 |
66 |
20 |
0 |
1874 |
I need you to just breathe normally for me. |
1.2323 |
0.05142 |
99 |
80 |
15 |
4 |
1875 |
Just one more test and you're free to go. |
1.2323 |
0.04501 |
99 |
77 |
21 |
1 |
1876 |
(This cartoon doesn't need a caption. Perfect as is. That's my entry.) |
1.2323 |
0.04938 |
99 |
79 |
17 |
3 |
1877 |
Don’t worry, it’s a very standard procedure. |
1.2323 |
0.04938 |
99 |
79 |
17 |
3 |
1878 |
Side effects may include lightheadedness |
1.2323 |
0.04938 |
99 |
79 |
17 |
3 |
1879 |
Better out than in! |
1.2323 |
0.04938 |
99 |
79 |
17 |
3 |
1880 |
I'll remove the cause, but not the symptom! |
1.2323 |
0.04501 |
99 |
77 |
21 |
1 |
1881 |
Now if you will wait, I shall perform surgery on your cork. |
1.2323 |
0.05142 |
99 |
80 |
15 |
4 |
1882 |
You'll anesthetize us both so we won't feel a thing. |
1.2321 |
0.04743 |
112 |
90 |
18 |
4 |
1883 |
What do you think this is, a Pixar movie? |
1.2317 |
0.05569 |
82 |
66 |
13 |
3 |
1884 |
I see from your chart that you are a splendid vintage. |
1.2317 |
0.05291 |
82 |
65 |
15 |
2 |
1885 |
Don't worry. The more you age, the more people will love you. |
1.2317 |
0.06086 |
82 |
68 |
9 |
5 |
1886 |
I understand you don't have a living will. |
1.2317 |
0.05833 |
82 |
67 |
11 |
4 |
1887 |
Doc, think of all of the health benefits I can provide. |
1.2317 |
0.05291 |
82 |
65 |
15 |
2 |
1888 |
You'll be pleased to know we don't use leeches anymore! |
1.2317 |
0.05569 |
82 |
66 |
13 |
3 |
1889 |
Trust me. A simple procedure and your Complexity will be Released to World. For the Acclaim you Truthfully, Socially, deserve . . |
1.2316 |
0.05065 |
95 |
76 |
16 |
3 |
1890 |
Prepare for a full body examination. |
1.2316 |
0.05065 |
95 |
76 |
16 |
3 |
1891 |
You want to be able to breath properly, right? |
1.2316 |
0.05281 |
95 |
77 |
14 |
4 |
1892 |
Headache? I have the cure. |
1.2315 |
0.04671 |
108 |
86 |
19 |
3 |
1893 |
Oh, this little thing? It should allow you to breathe easier. |
1.2315 |
0.04671 |
108 |
86 |
19 |
3 |
1894 |
Have you fasted for 24 hours? |
1.2314 |
0.04354 |
121 |
96 |
22 |
3 |
1895 |
I go in from the top, so don't worry. |
1.2308 |
0.05431 |
91 |
74 |
13 |
4 |
1896 |
You look like you could use a breather. |
1.2308 |
0.05201 |
91 |
73 |
15 |
3 |
1897 |
Think of it as relieving your pent-up inner spirit. |
1.2308 |
0.04371 |
104 |
81 |
22 |
1 |
1898 |
Yeah, pretty good thanks. Yourself? |
1.2308 |
0.05863 |
91 |
76 |
9 |
6 |
1899 |
And my bill will do something similar to you! |
1.2308 |
0.05431 |
91 |
74 |
13 |
4 |
1900 |
Its not good for you to keep this all bottled up inside. |
1.2308 |
0.05451 |
78 |
62 |
14 |
2 |
1901 |
Have you been feeling bottled up? |
1.2308 |
0.04779 |
104 |
83 |
18 |
3 |
1902 |
I'm just going to remove a little blockage. |
1.2308 |
0.04961 |
91 |
72 |
17 |
2 |
1903 |
Loose corks are my specialty. |
1.2308 |
0.04708 |
91 |
71 |
19 |
1 |
1904 |
Looks like it's time for your annual uncorking. |
1.2308 |
0.04579 |
104 |
82 |
20 |
2 |
1905 |
You're in luck: a small trepanation then a large transfusion and we'll both be feeling a lot better. |
1.2308 |
0.05201 |
91 |
73 |
15 |
3 |
1906 |
The only side effect is feeling a little drained. |
1.2308 |
0.04970 |
104 |
84 |
16 |
4 |
1907 |
nothing to worry about...be over before you know we unscrewed you |
1.2308 |
0.04761 |
117 |
95 |
17 |
5 |
1908 |
You’re going to feel a little prick then I’ll start to feel woozy. |
1.2308 |
0.05651 |
91 |
75 |
11 |
5 |
1909 |
Open your mouth and show me those big grapes! We will round those tannins in the least painless way |
1.2308 |
0.06301 |
78 |
65 |
8 |
5 |
1910 |
Well, once you reach a certain vintage, this procedure really is for the best. |
1.2301 |
0.04705 |
113 |
91 |
18 |
4 |
1911 |
Think of it as a quick neck adjustment that'll have your juices flowing again in no time. |
1.2301 |
0.05030 |
113 |
93 |
14 |
6 |
1912 |
I can solve all your problems in just a matter of wine- I mean time |
1.2300 |
0.04462 |
100 |
78 |
21 |
1 |
1913 |
Doc, primum non nocere |
1.2300 |
0.04683 |
100 |
79 |
19 |
2 |
1914 |
But I don't want to be screwed |
1.2300 |
0.04683 |
100 |
79 |
19 |
2 |
1915 |
No one said weight loss is painless. |
1.2300 |
0.05096 |
100 |
81 |
15 |
4 |
1916 |
Just wait till you need a colonoscopy! |
1.2300 |
0.04683 |
100 |
79 |
19 |
2 |
1917 |
I'm going to need to refer you to a sommelier. |
1.2299 |
0.05092 |
87 |
69 |
16 |
2 |
1918 |
Say hello to my lit'l friend. |
1.2299 |
0.05348 |
87 |
70 |
14 |
3 |
1919 |
You'll just feel a slight pinch... |
1.2299 |
0.05092 |
87 |
69 |
16 |
2 |
1920 |
How much if I endorse a drink a day? |
1.2299 |
0.05092 |
87 |
69 |
16 |
2 |
1921 |
That's the worst case of cork taint I've seen since Med School. |
1.2299 |
0.05092 |
87 |
69 |
16 |
2 |
1922 |
Your investment portfolio |
1.2299 |
0.05593 |
87 |
71 |
12 |
4 |
1923 |
Not to worry, we'll put you under and you won't feel a thing. |
1.2299 |
0.05593 |
87 |
71 |
12 |
4 |
1924 |
Good news! It's not a colonoscopy today! |
1.2299 |
0.04823 |
87 |
68 |
18 |
1 |
1925 |
No need to worry, I’m bore certified. |
1.2299 |
0.05827 |
87 |
72 |
10 |
5 |
1926 |
This is a very common procedure for those in your age group. |
1.2299 |
0.04823 |
87 |
68 |
18 |
1 |
1927 |
I'm known for screwing up. |
1.2299 |
0.05092 |
87 |
69 |
16 |
2 |
1928 |
Nothing to worry about but you'll feel a little drained later. |
1.2299 |
0.05593 |
87 |
71 |
12 |
4 |
1929 |
You did say you wanted to 'unlock' your inner nature. |
1.2297 |
0.05286 |
74 |
58 |
15 |
1 |
1930 |
The extraction procedure is painless, but you might feel a bit empty inside when I’m finished. |
1.2297 |
0.06538 |
74 |
62 |
7 |
5 |
1931 |
Bad news is your BAC is way too high. Good news is there's an easy fix. |
1.2297 |
0.05625 |
74 |
59 |
13 |
2 |
1932 |
People are always screwing with my head. |
1.2297 |
0.05625 |
74 |
59 |
13 |
2 |
1933 |
Who’s ready for their cork test? |
1.2297 |
0.06249 |
74 |
61 |
9 |
4 |
1934 |
At least bring me to a steak dinner before you screw me. |
1.2297 |
0.05945 |
74 |
60 |
11 |
3 |
1935 |
I'll make sure to not make a bang, only a pop. |
1.2294 |
0.04250 |
109 |
85 |
23 |
1 |
1936 |
Don't worry, it won't hurt! |
1.2294 |
0.04813 |
109 |
88 |
17 |
4 |
1937 |
Oh,no,it's not just cultural. There are health benefits for removing it too, |
1.2294 |
0.04986 |
109 |
89 |
15 |
5 |
1938 |
You don't have strep throat, you're just an extra dry." |
1.2294 |
0.04446 |
109 |
86 |
21 |
2 |
1939 |
I'm not an internist. I'm an oenophilist. |
1.2292 |
0.05826 |
96 |
81 |
8 |
7 |
1940 |
Don't whine, it'll only be a quick pinch! |
1.2292 |
0.04794 |
96 |
76 |
18 |
2 |
1941 |
You're just going to feel a small pinch |
1.2292 |
0.05017 |
96 |
77 |
16 |
3 |
1942 |
My colleagues and I agree. It's time for you to open up.. |
1.2292 |
0.04794 |
96 |
76 |
18 |
2 |
1943 |
Better top than bottom." |
1.2292 |
0.04794 |
96 |
76 |
18 |
2 |
1944 |
Just a slight poke and your aging woes will be over. |
1.2292 |
0.04559 |
96 |
75 |
20 |
1 |
1945 |
You look like you wish you were a twist top! |
1.2292 |
0.05635 |
96 |
80 |
10 |
6 |
1946 |
Corkectomies are reversible these days. |
1.2292 |
0.04794 |
96 |
76 |
18 |
2 |
1947 |
Are you a glass half full or a half empty type? |
1.2292 |
0.05231 |
96 |
78 |
14 |
4 |
1948 |
Don’t worry, it’s a simple procedure. |
1.2292 |
0.05017 |
96 |
77 |
16 |
3 |
1949 |
Oh! look at the wine talking |
1.2292 |
0.05017 |
96 |
77 |
16 |
3 |
1950 |
You won's be stopped up after this minor proceedure. |
1.2289 |
0.05508 |
83 |
67 |
13 |
3 |
1951 |
Tell me if this joke is in bad taste... |
1.2289 |
0.05508 |
83 |
67 |
13 |
3 |
1952 |
I assure you, we'll be feeling no pain and we won't remember a thing. |
1.2289 |
0.05235 |
83 |
66 |
15 |
2 |
1953 |
The nose is floral, but the PSA is a little high, so let's take a look. |
1.2289 |
0.05508 |
83 |
67 |
13 |
3 |
1954 |
What do you mean you were screwed and lost your cork |
1.2289 |
0.05769 |
83 |
68 |
11 |
4 |
1955 |
I would like to see my wife first, doc |
1.2289 |
0.05235 |
83 |
66 |
15 |
2 |
1956 |
I'm not sure what's wrong Dr, but my wife says all I do is whine. |
1.2286 |
0.04928 |
105 |
85 |
16 |
4 |
1957 |
This won't hurt a bit, and everyone will be happy to see you fulfill your destiny. You'd like that, wouldn't you? |
1.2286 |
0.04738 |
105 |
84 |
18 |
3 |
1958 |
Aww, don't worry, I'm not gonna screw you! |
1.2286 |
0.04738 |
105 |
84 |
18 |
3 |
1959 |
We think your BAC might be too high. |
1.2286 |
0.05817 |
70 |
56 |
12 |
2 |
1960 |
No, a urologist. Why do you ask? |
1.2286 |
0.04738 |
105 |
84 |
18 |
3 |
1961 |
It’s perfectly normal to be worried. But we’ll pull that out right away. |
1.2286 |
0.05286 |
105 |
87 |
12 |
6 |
1962 |
Actually, the treatment is less painful than the deductible. |
1.2286 |
0.04541 |
105 |
83 |
20 |
2 |
1963 |
Actually, it’s only a proctologist appointment if it’s from the proctolo region of Italy. |
1.2286 |
0.05110 |
105 |
86 |
14 |
5 |
1964 |
At your vintage are you still afraid of open cork exams? |
1.2283 |
0.05377 |
92 |
75 |
13 |
4 |
1965 |
I've got just the thing to relieve your headache. |
1.2283 |
0.04663 |
92 |
72 |
19 |
1 |
1966 |
If we can work on removing the blockage you won't have to strain to pour. |
1.2283 |
0.05150 |
92 |
74 |
15 |
3 |
1967 |
You may feel a little pressure. |
1.2283 |
0.04913 |
92 |
73 |
17 |
2 |
1968 |
You'll probably hear a loud 'pop' when the procedure is over" |
1.2283 |
0.04913 |
92 |
73 |
17 |
2 |
1969 |
You'll feel better when I help you to breathe a bit. |
1.2283 |
0.05150 |
92 |
74 |
15 |
3 |
1970 |
It'll just be a little poke. |
1.2283 |
0.05377 |
92 |
75 |
13 |
4 |
1971 |
I’ll be glad to take care of you |
1.2283 |
0.04663 |
92 |
72 |
19 |
1 |
1972 |
I'll be happy you'll be drained. |
1.2283 |
0.05377 |
92 |
75 |
13 |
4 |
1973 |
Do you need a minute to breathe before we get started? |
1.2283 |
0.04663 |
92 |
72 |
19 |
1 |
1974 |
You won’t be the first to get screwed by the System!” |
1.2283 |
0.05595 |
92 |
76 |
11 |
5 |
1975 |
Trust me, it would be best to drain it. |
1.2283 |
0.04663 |
92 |
72 |
19 |
1 |
1976 |
This procedure can only be done once. |
1.2283 |
0.04913 |
92 |
73 |
17 |
2 |
1977 |
I dunno doc, this procedure seems like it might be a pour decision |
1.2283 |
0.04913 |
92 |
73 |
17 |
2 |
1978 |
You look like you could use a drink...only kidding. |
1.2281 |
0.04831 |
114 |
93 |
16 |
5 |
1979 |
When patients like you reach a certain age, there is a procedure I heartily recommend. |
1.2281 |
0.04499 |
114 |
91 |
20 |
3 |
1980 |
One quick twist and it's over! |
1.2278 |
0.05390 |
79 |
63 |
14 |
2 |
1981 |
Your copayment is only two bucks, Chuck. |
1.2277 |
0.04850 |
101 |
81 |
17 |
3 |
1982 |
The problem's in your head. |
1.2277 |
0.05050 |
101 |
82 |
15 |
4 |
1983 |
It's much more effective than the traditional enema... |
1.2277 |
0.04850 |
101 |
81 |
17 |
3 |
1984 |
Better in the neck than in the bunghole. |
1.2277 |
0.04642 |
101 |
80 |
19 |
2 |
1985 |
This will only feel like a little prick. |
1.2277 |
0.04850 |
101 |
81 |
17 |
3 |
1986 |
It’ll just be a little pinch and you’ll feel lighter in no time. |
1.2277 |
0.05243 |
101 |
83 |
13 |
5 |
1987 |
Tell me, how long you've kept this all bottled up? |
1.2273 |
0.04775 |
88 |
69 |
18 |
1 |
1988 |
It's no worse than a colonoscopy, and you only do it once. |
1.2273 |
0.05041 |
88 |
70 |
16 |
2 |
1989 |
The whole lab is looking forward to the tasting...I mean testing. |
1.2273 |
0.05294 |
88 |
71 |
14 |
3 |
1990 |
Colonoscopies are recommended at your age. |
1.2273 |
0.05535 |
88 |
72 |
12 |
4 |
1991 |
Let's open our relationship ! |
1.2273 |
0.05294 |
88 |
71 |
14 |
3 |
1992 |
Don’t worry, you have plenty of anesthesia on board. |
1.2273 |
0.05041 |
88 |
70 |
16 |
2 |
1993 |
True, but it will help you breathe. |
1.2268 |
0.04750 |
97 |
77 |
18 |
2 |
1994 |
We all serve in our own way. |
1.2268 |
0.04750 |
97 |
77 |
18 |
2 |
1995 |
You've reached the age where I'd advise you have a corkoscopy. |
1.2268 |
0.04971 |
97 |
78 |
16 |
3 |
1996 |
Stop whining. |
1.2268 |
0.05182 |
97 |
79 |
14 |
4 |
1997 |
I promise it won't hurt and you'll feel much lighter! |
1.2268 |
0.04750 |
97 |
77 |
18 |
2 |
1998 |
Oh, incidentally, Baron, once we've dealt with that dry cork you're suffering from, the staff insists that we have you over for dinner. What do you say? The meal wouldn't be the same without YOU! |
1.2268 |
0.04971 |
97 |
78 |
16 |
3 |
1999 |
Think of it as being open to a new experience! |
1.2268 |
0.04971 |
97 |
78 |
16 |
3 |
2000 |
Before we begin, can you assure me that you're not corked? |
1.2268 |
0.04518 |
97 |
76 |
20 |
1 |
2001 |
Relax! You'll be fine in a few years. |
1.2268 |
0.04518 |
97 |
76 |
20 |
1 |
2002 |
I think I have something that will help you breathe. |
1.2268 |
0.05182 |
97 |
79 |
14 |
4 |
2003 |
Let’s do some breathing exercises. |
1.2268 |
0.04750 |
97 |
77 |
18 |
2 |
2004 |
"It's completely painless if you're over 40 Proof." |
1.2268 |
0.04971 |
97 |
78 |
16 |
3 |
2005 |
No, no...trust me this is through the top. |
1.2268 |
0.04518 |
97 |
76 |
20 |
1 |
2006 |
Surprise! This is what you were fer-meant-ed for. |
1.2268 |
0.04750 |
97 |
77 |
18 |
2 |
2007 |
The good news is ,once I remove it ,breathing will be much easier |
1.2268 |
0.04750 |
97 |
77 |
18 |
2 |
2008 |
Usually it just pops out. |
1.2268 |
0.04971 |
97 |
78 |
16 |
3 |
2009 |
You'll be breathing a lot easier just as soon as we get the cork out |
1.2268 |
0.04971 |
97 |
78 |
16 |
3 |
2010 |
Now, this might sting a bit |
1.2268 |
0.04750 |
97 |
77 |
18 |
2 |
2011 |
I identify as Champagne...Champagne!! |
1.2267 |
0.05224 |
75 |
59 |
15 |
1 |
2012 |
Believe me-it's a necessary procedure for individuals who have reached your vintage. |
1.2266 |
0.04602 |
128 |
105 |
17 |
6 |
2013 |
Bend over and let me check your vintage. |
1.2264 |
0.05240 |
106 |
88 |
12 |
6 |
2014 |
Sir, you are about to be screwed. |
1.2264 |
0.05066 |
106 |
87 |
14 |
5 |
2015 |
Don't think of it that way! It's more like mouth-to-mouth. |
1.2264 |
0.04698 |
106 |
85 |
18 |
3 |
2016 |
This might be a bit draining, but in the end you'll feel less acidic. |
1.2264 |
0.04698 |
106 |
85 |
18 |
3 |
2017 |
The results came back...we are having steak tonight. |
1.2264 |
0.04886 |
106 |
86 |
16 |
4 |
2018 |
I don't believe you've been mislabeled,and this isn't exploratory surgery |
1.2264 |
0.05066 |
106 |
87 |
14 |
5 |
2019 |
How about we unwind a little bit |
1.2264 |
0.05240 |
106 |
88 |
12 |
6 |
2020 |
You have aged so smoothly that I brought a surprise to help us celebrate. |
1.2264 |
0.04886 |
106 |
86 |
16 |
4 |
2021 |
“It’s a time honored medical procedure to release spirits.” |
1.2264 |
0.04503 |
106 |
84 |
20 |
2 |
2022 |
It's a routine procedure for wines of your vintage to have a cork exam. |
1.2262 |
0.05449 |
84 |
68 |
13 |
3 |
2023 |
it's my first time too |
1.2262 |
0.05449 |
84 |
68 |
13 |
3 |
2024 |
I was just kidding when I said that this would hurt me more than you. |
1.2262 |
0.05179 |
84 |
67 |
15 |
2 |
2025 |
I made you. I can drain you. |
1.2262 |
0.05179 |
84 |
67 |
15 |
2 |
2026 |
It's a little invasive, but you will soon be peeing like a fire hose again" |
1.2262 |
0.05706 |
84 |
69 |
11 |
4 |
2027 |
Yes, yes, if we can find the hints of road tar, we'll get them too. |
1.2262 |
0.05179 |
84 |
67 |
15 |
2 |
2028 |
Oh wine, I'm going to open those hips... Medically |
1.2262 |
0.05706 |
84 |
69 |
11 |
4 |
2029 |
It happens with age. |
1.2258 |
0.04866 |
93 |
74 |
17 |
2 |
2030 |
This might hurt a little. |
1.2258 |
0.04866 |
93 |
74 |
17 |
2 |
2031 |
And then you will gradually lose weight, just as I promised. |
1.2258 |
0.05325 |
93 |
76 |
13 |
4 |
2032 |
It's going to be long and hard - just breathe. |
1.2258 |
0.05325 |
93 |
76 |
13 |
4 |
2033 |
It's your lucky day, I am seeing walk-ins. |
1.2258 |
0.05100 |
93 |
75 |
15 |
3 |
2034 |
No, of course not! That would be a lobotomy which totally passe... |
1.2258 |
0.04619 |
93 |
73 |
19 |
1 |
2035 |
Do you know what 'getting screwed' means |
1.2258 |
0.05325 |
93 |
76 |
13 |
4 |
2036 |
You'll breathe a lot easier when were done. |
1.2258 |
0.04619 |
93 |
73 |
19 |
1 |
2037 |
Yes, I can uncork your spirits.
Side effects include feeling empty, even trashed. |
1.2258 |
0.04619 |
93 |
73 |
19 |
1 |
2038 |
Now we'll just need to draw two glasses — er, I mean vials |
1.2258 |
0.04359 |
93 |
72 |
21 |
0 |
2039 |
I promise I am not going to screw you! |
1.2258 |
0.05100 |
93 |
75 |
15 |
3 |
2040 |
I promise I'll still respect you in the morning! |
1.2258 |
0.05100 |
93 |
75 |
15 |
3 |
2041 |
I think I've found a way to stop your whining. |
1.2258 |
0.04866 |
93 |
74 |
17 |
2 |
2042 |
Ready for your enema? |
1.2258 |
0.04866 |
93 |
74 |
17 |
2 |
2043 |
I know it's invasive but you've aged 50 years now so it's recommended. |
1.2258 |
0.05100 |
93 |
75 |
15 |
3 |
2044 |
We'll need to drill down a little further in this checkup. |
1.2258 |
0.05100 |
93 |
75 |
15 |
3 |
2045 |
I’m just going to run a few tastings |
1.2258 |
0.05100 |
93 |
75 |
15 |
3 |
2046 |
I won't screw you I promise |
1.2258 |
0.05325 |
93 |
76 |
13 |
4 |
2047 |
Don't worry. This isn't a "gay thing." |
1.2255 |
0.05196 |
102 |
84 |
13 |
5 |
2048 |
Not to worry, I'm the sommelier, now get ready to take a deep breath. |
1.2255 |
0.04808 |
102 |
82 |
17 |
3 |
2049 |
It's a 12 step program. We'll detox you a couple shots at a time and before you know it you'll be alcohol free. |
1.2255 |
0.05006 |
102 |
83 |
15 |
4 |
2050 |
There’s no need to be afraid, Mr. Noir – fear adds acidity and we wouldn’t want that. |
1.2255 |
0.04808 |
102 |
82 |
17 |
3 |
2051 |
You'll only feel a slight pinch. |
1.2254 |
0.06084 |
71 |
58 |
10 |
3 |
2052 |
You feel corked? Well, there's only one way to find out |
1.2254 |
0.06084 |
71 |
58 |
10 |
3 |
2053 |
Don't worry, you'll get better with age |
1.2252 |
0.04904 |
111 |
91 |
15 |
5 |
2054 |
I figured out how we can both feel pressure relief! |
1.2252 |
0.04183 |
111 |
87 |
23 |
1 |
2055 |
Ahem, yes! As I was saying- Don't worry, I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy!
Umm...your cheeks look a little rose'... |
1.2250 |
0.05618 |
80 |
65 |
12 |
3 |
2056 |
This might sting. |
1.2250 |
0.05893 |
80 |
66 |
10 |
4 |
2057 |
Say aah. |
1.2250 |
0.05329 |
80 |
64 |
14 |
2 |
2058 |
Honestly! I’m not screwing around! |
1.2250 |
0.05024 |
80 |
63 |
16 |
1 |
2059 |
Sorry,but everyone agrees it is best if we drink you now. |
1.2250 |
0.05329 |
80 |
64 |
14 |
2 |
2060 |
You should only feel a small twist |
1.2250 |
0.05329 |
80 |
64 |
14 |
2 |
2061 |
You’ll feel a little prick, but you’ll breathe a lot easier after this procedure. |
1.2250 |
0.04698 |
80 |
62 |
18 |
0 |
2062 |
Don't worry, I've got just the thing to get us out of this sticky situation! |
1.2250 |
0.05329 |
80 |
64 |
14 |
2 |
2063 |
I have a treatment that will blow your mind. . |
1.2250 |
0.05024 |
80 |
63 |
16 |
1 |
2064 |
Too bad you’re not a screw top |
1.2250 |
0.05618 |
80 |
65 |
12 |
3 |
2065 |
Trust me, I'm an expert on aging. |
1.2247 |
0.04990 |
89 |
71 |
16 |
2 |
2066 |
I'd say you've passed the Reflexes part of the examination. |
1.2247 |
0.05707 |
89 |
74 |
10 |
5 |
2067 |
I'd reccomend breathing in your case, but ultimately the decision is yours. |
1.2247 |
0.05478 |
89 |
73 |
12 |
4 |
2068 |
My diagnosis is too much body, but I think we’ve found a solution. |
1.2247 |
0.04990 |
89 |
71 |
16 |
2 |
2069 |
It's just a minor procedure to collect a little fluid for a standard, basic, cheese pairing analysis. |
1.2247 |
0.05478 |
89 |
73 |
12 |
4 |
2070 |
Now, I bet you wish you had chosen the screw top closer. |
1.2247 |
0.04990 |
89 |
71 |
16 |
2 |
2071 |
Don't worry, this will only hurt a sip... |
1.2247 |
0.05240 |
89 |
72 |
14 |
3 |
2072 |
I SURE HOPE THIS WORKS! |
1.2247 |
0.05240 |
89 |
72 |
14 |
3 |
2073 |
You have aged well. Bottoms up. |
1.2247 |
0.05478 |
89 |
73 |
12 |
4 |
2074 |
No, it’s not a blood letting. |
1.2247 |
0.04990 |
89 |
71 |
16 |
2 |
2075 |
Just one more sample please. The previous test result was inconclusive. |
1.2247 |
0.04990 |
89 |
71 |
16 |
2 |
2076 |
It will be fast and easy and you'll feel a lot thinner. |
1.2247 |
0.05478 |
89 |
73 |
12 |
4 |
2077 |
Don’t worry. I think you just need to breathe. |
1.2247 |
0.05240 |
89 |
72 |
14 |
3 |
2078 |
A test, a little test .....did I say taste? I meant test..... |
1.2245 |
0.05335 |
98 |
81 |
12 |
5 |
2079 |
Just a quick prick, a slight tugging sensation, and all the pressure will be relieved |
1.2245 |
0.04925 |
98 |
79 |
16 |
3 |
2080 |
Don't worry about insurance. It's my pleasure. |
1.2245 |
0.05135 |
98 |
80 |
14 |
4 |
2081 |
It’s not brain surgery. |
1.2245 |
0.04707 |
98 |
78 |
18 |
2 |
2082 |
Yes, it’s my first time,
but I watched the YouTube. |
1.2245 |
0.04925 |
98 |
79 |
16 |
3 |
2083 |
Yes, I promise. The relief will be immediate. |
1.2245 |
0.04925 |
98 |
79 |
16 |
3 |
2084 |
Once your cork is removed, we will all be feeling better” |
1.2245 |
0.04925 |
98 |
79 |
16 |
3 |
2085 |
We have a solution. |
1.2245 |
0.05529 |
98 |
82 |
10 |
6 |
2086 |
I told you to stop drinking. |
1.2237 |
0.05164 |
76 |
60 |
15 |
1 |
2087 |
Trust me, your legs are just fine. |
1.2237 |
0.05803 |
76 |
62 |
11 |
3 |
2088 |
I believe that you will feel much better if you unbottle yourself. |
1.2237 |
0.05803 |
76 |
62 |
11 |
3 |
2089 |
The procedure is minimally invasion, and we will be collecting samples for laboratory testing. |
1.2237 |
0.05493 |
76 |
61 |
13 |
2 |
2090 |
No sir, it's *therapists* that can't have a dual relationship. Now I insist you join us for dinner! |
1.2237 |
0.06098 |
76 |
63 |
9 |
4 |
2091 |
I won't screw you over--I promise. |
1.2235 |
0.05125 |
85 |
68 |
15 |
2 |
2092 |
Relaz. The unscrewing hurts more |
1.2235 |
0.05645 |
85 |
70 |
11 |
4 |
2093 |
A GOOD SCREWING WILL OPEN YOU UP! |
1.2235 |
0.05125 |
85 |
68 |
15 |
2 |
2094 |
We'll just infuse a bit of Brewer's Yeast, yes? |
1.2235 |
0.05645 |
85 |
70 |
11 |
4 |
2095 |
Don't think of it as being screwed. Think of it as being able to breathe. |
1.2235 |
0.05125 |
85 |
68 |
15 |
2 |
2096 |
I think I can solve your problem. It'll definitely solve mine. |
1.2235 |
0.05391 |
85 |
69 |
13 |
3 |
2097 |
It's important to not keep things bottled up, and I can help with that! ;) |
1.2235 |
0.04546 |
85 |
66 |
19 |
0 |
2098 |
Time to get screwed! |
1.2235 |
0.05645 |
85 |
70 |
11 |
4 |
2099 |
Just bend over |
1.2234 |
0.05273 |
94 |
77 |
13 |
4 |
2100 |
Compared to the boat launching I just attended, this won't hurt a bit! |
1.2234 |
0.05052 |
94 |
76 |
15 |
3 |
2101 |
I will now allow you to breathe. |
1.2234 |
0.04820 |
94 |
75 |
17 |
2 |
2102 |
Don't worry, most patients only let out a little whine. |
1.2234 |
0.05052 |
94 |
76 |
15 |
3 |
2103 |
On average, how many humans do you consume in a week? |
1.2234 |
0.05052 |
94 |
76 |
15 |
3 |
2104 |
We're so happy you scheduled your appointment on "Roast Beef Wednesday." |
1.2234 |
0.05052 |
94 |
76 |
15 |
3 |
2105 |
This should relieve that sinus pressure in your head. |
1.2234 |
0.05052 |
94 |
76 |
15 |
3 |
2106 |
This isn't the first time i've screwed with a patient before. |
1.2234 |
0.05052 |
94 |
76 |
15 |
3 |
2107 |
and after it’s all over, we’ll have a toast to your good health. |
1.2234 |
0.05273 |
94 |
77 |
13 |
4 |
2108 |
I do this all the time. I'm just going to open you up to let you breathe. |
1.2234 |
0.05052 |
94 |
76 |
15 |
3 |
2109 |
Scout's honor, this will help you breathe. |
1.2234 |
0.04820 |
94 |
75 |
17 |
2 |
2110 |
Better this way than being screwed by the insurance company. |
1.2234 |
0.04319 |
94 |
73 |
21 |
0 |
2111 |
Making use of my accrediation as both a proctologist and sommelier, I am about to assuage your fear of becoming a very expensive vinegar. |
1.2234 |
0.05486 |
94 |
78 |
11 |
5 |
2112 |
Body seems great,definitely a big nose but let |
1.2234 |
0.04820 |
94 |
75 |
17 |
2 |
2113 |
In vino veritas,I am out of wine and out of network. |
1.2233 |
0.04562 |
103 |
82 |
19 |
2 |
2114 |
This is a very common procedure and you won't feel a thing. |
1.2222 |
0.05270 |
81 |
65 |
14 |
2 |
2115 |
You know I've always said I'll be completely open with you. |
1.2222 |
0.05316 |
72 |
57 |
14 |
1 |
2116 |
You've aged to the point that now I recommend a corkenoscopy daily! |
1.2222 |
0.04881 |
99 |
80 |
16 |
3 |
2117 |
Don't worry, it's just a pinch. |
1.2222 |
0.05188 |
90 |
73 |
14 |
3 |
2118 |
I've been looking forward to a DRE of your vintage for a long time. |
1.2222 |
0.05188 |
90 |
73 |
14 |
3 |
2119 |
I've got grape news! |
1.2222 |
0.04969 |
81 |
64 |
16 |
1 |
2120 |
Don’t worry this is standard practice as you age. |
1.2222 |
0.04229 |
108 |
85 |
22 |
1 |
2121 |
My wife wouldn't stop talking, so I told her to 'put a cork in it'. The next thing I knew.... |
1.2222 |
0.05270 |
81 |
65 |
14 |
2 |
2122 |
Trust me, I've performed this procedure thousands of times. |
1.2222 |
0.04941 |
90 |
72 |
16 |
2 |
2123 |
Yes,I might just have a corkscrew for you. |
1.2222 |
0.04941 |
90 |
72 |
16 |
2 |
2124 |
You have an expansive future ... you need to breathe ... deeply!" |
1.2222 |
0.04682 |
90 |
71 |
18 |
1 |
2125 |
I would love to relieve some pressure for you! |
1.2222 |
0.04804 |
108 |
88 |
16 |
4 |
2126 |
Don’t worry. Decanting is a lot less invasive nowadays. |
1.2222 |
0.05087 |
99 |
81 |
14 |
4 |
2127 |
It appears you have some bottled up emotions. |
1.2222 |
0.04682 |
90 |
71 |
18 |
1 |
2128 |
Don't worry you'll just feel a little tug. |
1.2222 |
0.04969 |
81 |
64 |
16 |
1 |
2129 |
Don’t worry…I did my residency in Proctology. |
1.2222 |
0.04881 |
99 |
80 |
16 |
3 |
2130 |
So there is something we can do before you pop your cork |
1.2222 |
0.05270 |
81 |
65 |
14 |
2 |
2131 |
You may feel a slight pressure. |
1.2222 |
0.05188 |
90 |
73 |
14 |
3 |
2132 |
I'm screwed, aren't I? In a manner of speaking yes, but I'm going to unscrew you. |
1.2222 |
0.05316 |
72 |
57 |
14 |
1 |
2133 |
At last, I get to treat the cause rather than the patient. |
1.2222 |
0.05188 |
90 |
73 |
14 |
3 |
2134 |
Watch, this will blow your mind |
1.2222 |
0.04969 |
81 |
64 |
16 |
1 |
2135 |
I call this procedure, a lobottlemy. |
1.2222 |
0.04881 |
99 |
80 |
16 |
3 |
2136 |
Yes, it is an off-label treatment and you will feel somewhat drained afterward, but that's to be expected. |
1.2222 |
0.05188 |
90 |
73 |
14 |
3 |
2137 |
I have a surprise for you and you won't feel a thing. |
1.2222 |
0.05270 |
81 |
65 |
14 |
2 |
2138 |
Good news. You don't have to worry about your age. |
1.2222 |
0.04969 |
81 |
64 |
16 |
1 |
2139 |
Sorry, just got the Lab results and your screwed |
1.2222 |
0.05188 |
90 |
73 |
14 |
3 |
2140 |
I promise it won't hurt at all ma'am |
1.2222 |
0.04941 |
90 |
72 |
16 |
2 |
2141 |
Trust me, I’m a connoisseur. |
1.2222 |
0.05087 |
99 |
81 |
14 |
4 |
2142 |
I think you should open your mind. Let me help you |
1.2222 |
0.05556 |
81 |
66 |
12 |
3 |
2143 |
Yes, I will be able to put it right back in |
1.2222 |
0.05423 |
90 |
74 |
12 |
4 |
2144 |
Now turn your head and quaff. |
1.2222 |
0.04407 |
90 |
70 |
20 |
0 |
2145 |
Relax...I'm a licensed oenologist |
1.2212 |
0.04986 |
113 |
94 |
13 |
6 |
2146 |
Don't be nervous, it's just a little procedure that will help you breath. |
1.2212 |
0.04523 |
104 |
83 |
19 |
2 |
2147 |
Now, you may think this is a little screwy... |
1.2212 |
0.04725 |
104 |
84 |
17 |
3 |
2148 |
I prefer saying “open wide” rather than you are “About to be screwed”. |
1.2212 |
0.04918 |
104 |
85 |
15 |
4 |
2149 |
Trust me, you'll breathe a lot easier if we get you to open up and let out what you’ve had bottled up inside. |
1.2212 |
0.05105 |
104 |
86 |
13 |
5 |
2150 |
It's normal to blush. |
1.2211 |
0.04534 |
95 |
75 |
19 |
1 |
2151 |
Just a little pinch. |
1.2211 |
0.05004 |
95 |
77 |
15 |
3 |
2152 |
It is time to down you and drown me. |
1.2211 |
0.05004 |
95 |
77 |
15 |
3 |
2153 |
If you don't mind me saying, you are aging like fine wine. |
1.2211 |
0.04775 |
95 |
76 |
17 |
2 |
2154 |
No, I said not non-invasive. |
1.2211 |
0.05004 |
95 |
77 |
15 |
3 |
2155 |
Would you like to thumb through a copy of Highlights first? |
1.2211 |
0.04775 |
95 |
76 |
17 |
2 |
2156 |
And now a special surprise for being named Physician's Assistant of the week.... |
1.2211 |
0.04775 |
95 |
76 |
17 |
2 |
2157 |
Ok my wonderful AI wine bottle, it's time to get screwed! |
1.2211 |
0.05004 |
95 |
77 |
15 |
3 |
2158 |
Can you cough for me. |
1.2209 |
0.04794 |
86 |
68 |
17 |
1 |
2159 |
We're awaiting lab results from the saloon. |
1.2209 |
0.05335 |
86 |
70 |
13 |
3 |
2160 |
Hope I don't screw this up, I'm used to giving shots. |
1.2209 |
0.05585 |
86 |
71 |
11 |
4 |
2161 |
The good news is you don't need a colonoscopy. |
1.2209 |
0.06277 |
86 |
74 |
5 |
7 |
2162 |
Doc, I'd rather the colonoscopy. |
1.2209 |
0.04794 |
86 |
68 |
17 |
1 |
2163 |
To put it bluntly, the treatment will screw you. |
1.2209 |
0.05585 |
86 |
71 |
11 |
4 |
2164 |
You shouldn't be afraid to open up. |
1.2209 |
0.05585 |
86 |
71 |
11 |
4 |
2165 |
Sorry, the only way is to drill down and extract it. |
1.2209 |
0.04500 |
86 |
67 |
19 |
0 |
2166 |
In your case, it's a grand scru. |
1.2209 |
0.05335 |
86 |
70 |
13 |
3 |
2167 |
Straight, no chaser. |
1.2209 |
0.05335 |
86 |
70 |
13 |
3 |
2168 |
One bottle’s pain, is another man’s pleasure |
1.2209 |
0.05072 |
86 |
69 |
15 |
2 |
2169 |
Nothing to worry about, your colonoscopy results are normal |
1.2208 |
0.06026 |
77 |
64 |
9 |
4 |
2170 |
Doc, I don't think I have a headache anymore |
1.2208 |
0.05429 |
77 |
62 |
13 |
2 |
2171 |
Will someone need to drive me home? |
1.2208 |
0.05429 |
77 |
62 |
13 |
2 |
2172 |
Don’t wine about it and just breathe. |
1.2208 |
0.05429 |
77 |
62 |
13 |
2 |
2173 |
Sir, there’s no need for an explanation as to how it got in there. If you say it was an accident than I believe you. What’s important now is that we get it out. |
1.2208 |
0.05735 |
77 |
63 |
11 |
3 |
2174 |
It’s in a breech position, so I’m going to perform a corkectomy. |
1.2203 |
0.04362 |
118 |
95 |
20 |
3 |
2175 |
It is not going to hurt, may be just a little... |
1.2202 |
0.04393 |
109 |
87 |
20 |
2 |
2176 |
Don't worry I have done lots of intravino injections |
1.2202 |
0.04939 |
109 |
90 |
14 |
5 |
2177 |
Now this won't hurt a bit! |
1.2200 |
0.05041 |
100 |
82 |
14 |
4 |
2178 |
You're definitely starting to show your age. |
1.2198 |
0.05136 |
91 |
74 |
14 |
3 |
2179 |
No, I use a something besides a scalpel. |
1.2198 |
0.05369 |
91 |
75 |
12 |
4 |
2180 |
There's no charge for this. Only a corkage fee." |
1.2198 |
0.04636 |
91 |
72 |
18 |
1 |
2181 |
I bet you don't pop your cork for every guy you see. |
1.2198 |
0.05136 |
91 |
74 |
14 |
3 |
2182 |
And I say you do need a colonoscopy. |
1.2198 |
0.05136 |
91 |
74 |
14 |
3 |
2183 |
I just need to draw a little fluid to taste,I mean test |
1.2198 |
0.05136 |
91 |
74 |
14 |
3 |
2184 |
I think you might be corked, but there’s only one way to find out. |
1.2198 |
0.04893 |
91 |
73 |
16 |
2 |
2185 |
Good news! Your insurance will cover the procedure. |
1.2198 |
0.05591 |
91 |
76 |
10 |
5 |
2186 |
I’m think I‘m having a chardonnay arrest.” |
1.2198 |
0.04893 |
91 |
73 |
16 |
2 |
2187 |
Looks like it’s time for the ol’ uncork and cough. |
1.2198 |
0.04893 |
91 |
73 |
16 |
2 |
2188 |
Ok champ, let’s get a closer look at that neck. |
1.2198 |
0.04893 |
91 |
73 |
16 |
2 |
2189 |
So I understand you've been feeling under pressure? |
1.2198 |
0.05369 |
91 |
75 |
12 |
4 |
2190 |
This will lower your blood pressure immediately |
1.2195 |
0.05494 |
82 |
67 |
12 |
3 |
2191 |
Just open wide and you won't remember... I mean, um, FEEL a thing! |
1.2195 |
0.05494 |
82 |
67 |
12 |
3 |
2192 |
You'll feel much better once we get that removed... |
1.2195 |
0.05494 |
82 |
67 |
12 |
3 |
2193 |
I'm almost certain that it is benign, but we ought to remove it anyway. |
1.2195 |
0.05762 |
82 |
68 |
10 |
4 |
2194 |
This won't hurt a bit...it'll be over before you know it. |
1.2195 |
0.05494 |
82 |
67 |
12 |
3 |
2195 |
You'll find it easier to breathe once we decant. |
1.2195 |
0.05762 |
82 |
68 |
10 |
4 |
2196 |
Don't worry, Mr. Merlot, we will have you back in the cellar in no time. |
1.2195 |
0.05213 |
82 |
66 |
14 |
2 |
2197 |
Did you seriously think you would get inside by telling people I smell like stable? |
1.2195 |
0.05762 |
82 |
68 |
10 |
4 |
2198 |
After the procedure we're just going to let you breathe a little. |
1.2195 |
0.05213 |
82 |
66 |
14 |
2 |
2199 |
It is after hours, but lucky for you I’m a workaholic. |
1.2195 |
0.05494 |
82 |
67 |
12 |
3 |
2200 |
stop whining, a good screw will make you feel much better |
1.2195 |
0.05213 |
82 |
66 |
14 |
2 |
2201 |
I like to unwind, how about you? |
1.2193 |
0.04622 |
114 |
93 |
17 |
4 |
2202 |
It'll just tickle a little |
1.2192 |
0.05602 |
73 |
59 |
12 |
2 |
2203 |
Your test results will come back tomorrow. Hopefully." |
1.2192 |
0.06244 |
73 |
61 |
8 |
4 |
2204 |
Let me put it to you this way, I think you’re screwed. |
1.2192 |
0.05602 |
73 |
59 |
12 |
2 |
2205 |
Just take a deep breath. It will be over soon. |
1.2190 |
0.04684 |
105 |
85 |
17 |
3 |
2206 |
Close your eyes and breathe, it will help you open up |
1.2188 |
0.05173 |
96 |
79 |
13 |
4 |
2207 |
THIS IS A POLITICAL CARTOON ABOUT HEALTHCARE IN AMERICA.
YOU GET SCREWED NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU WINE. |
1.2188 |
0.05381 |
96 |
80 |
11 |
5 |
2208 |
I have just the remedy to help you feel better in no time! |
1.2188 |
0.04957 |
96 |
78 |
15 |
3 |
2209 |
Now just try to relax |
1.2188 |
0.05173 |
96 |
79 |
13 |
4 |
2210 |
So tell me,does organic run in your family? |
1.2188 |
0.04730 |
96 |
77 |
17 |
2 |
2211 |
Could I interest you in a little head massage” |
1.2188 |
0.04730 |
96 |
77 |
17 |
2 |
2212 |
After your aeration we’ll be joined by women and song. |
1.2188 |
0.05581 |
96 |
81 |
9 |
6 |
2213 |
A small step for you, a giant leap for Oenology. |
1.2184 |
0.05279 |
87 |
71 |
13 |
3 |
2214 |
Good news (for me)! I have a way to get you unstopped. |
1.2184 |
0.05991 |
87 |
74 |
7 |
6 |
2215 |
Yes, you are my last appointment for the day! |
1.2184 |
0.05526 |
87 |
72 |
11 |
4 |
2216 |
Ah so... |
1.2184 |
0.04746 |
87 |
69 |
17 |
1 |
2217 |
We have a party of six on standby. |
1.2184 |
0.05019 |
87 |
70 |
15 |
2 |
2218 |
Ever had liver and fava beans? |
1.2184 |
0.05526 |
87 |
72 |
11 |
4 |
2219 |
This won't take long and it definitely won't hurt! |
1.2184 |
0.05019 |
87 |
70 |
15 |
2 |
2220 |
We don't use that vulgar term here; however, the results will be the same. |
1.2184 |
0.05019 |
87 |
70 |
15 |
2 |
2221 |
Let’s see what’s in there! |
1.2184 |
0.05279 |
87 |
71 |
13 |
3 |
2222 |
Don’t worry! Everything will be wine—I mean fine. |
1.2184 |
0.05279 |
87 |
71 |
13 |
3 |
2223 |
A little labottleme will have you bubbling with happiness. |
1.2184 |
0.05279 |
87 |
71 |
13 |
3 |
2224 |
Good news! You’ll soon be breathing much easier. |
1.2184 |
0.05526 |
87 |
72 |
11 |
4 |
2225 |
Don’t screw with me doc. |
1.2184 |
0.05526 |
87 |
72 |
11 |
4 |
2226 |
you may feel a little screwed up afterwards |
1.2184 |
0.05279 |
87 |
71 |
13 |
3 |
2227 |
Ah so it's respiratory–I've got just the thing to help you breathe. |
1.2179 |
0.05954 |
78 |
65 |
9 |
4 |
2228 |
Good news! We only need to withdraw some fluids. |
1.2179 |
0.05668 |
78 |
64 |
11 |
3 |
2229 |
Just relax, I'm an oenologist, not a proctologist. |
1.2179 |
0.05954 |
78 |
65 |
9 |
4 |
2230 |
Turn your head and cork - I MEAN COUGH....turn your head and cough... |
1.2179 |
0.05366 |
78 |
63 |
13 |
2 |
2231 |
I guess I’m getting screwed one way or the other |
1.2179 |
0.05366 |
78 |
63 |
13 |
2 |
2232 |
Why keep things bottled up inside of you? |
1.2178 |
0.04996 |
101 |
83 |
14 |
4 |
2233 |
No wine is good until it's time...it's time! |
1.2178 |
0.04582 |
101 |
81 |
18 |
2 |
2234 |
Don't worry, I perform 3 of these a day |
1.2178 |
0.04794 |
101 |
82 |
16 |
3 |
2235 |
Sorry, there is no prep for a visit like this. |
1.2178 |
0.04361 |
101 |
80 |
20 |
1 |
2236 |
I have a great new idea on how you're gonna lose weight! |
1.2178 |
0.04361 |
101 |
80 |
20 |
1 |
2237 |
I understand you’ve been feeling some pressure. |
1.2178 |
0.05190 |
101 |
84 |
12 |
5 |
2238 |
The good news is your next procedure will be beneficial for both your headache AND mine |
1.2178 |
0.04794 |
101 |
82 |
16 |
3 |
2239 |
This motherfucker… |
1.2174 |
0.05315 |
92 |
76 |
12 |
4 |
2240 |
I can make you happy. |
1.2174 |
0.06149 |
69 |
57 |
9 |
3 |
2241 |
Not to worry Mr. Merlot, you have a simple screw off. |
1.2174 |
0.05747 |
92 |
78 |
8 |
6 |
2242 |
Let's start with a check of your rotten grape levels. |
1.2174 |
0.04592 |
92 |
73 |
18 |
1 |
2243 |
The most common risk is cork crumble. Rarely, the cork will get stuck. In that event , we resort of sabrage. |
1.2174 |
0.05086 |
92 |
75 |
14 |
3 |
2244 |
I have my ways to get you to open up. |
1.2174 |
0.05086 |
92 |
75 |
14 |
3 |
2245 |
Why do I feel I am about to get intellectually screwed? |
1.2174 |
0.04845 |
92 |
74 |
16 |
2 |
2246 |
Don’t be nervous, I’m an expert in vino-puncture. |
1.2174 |
0.05792 |
69 |
56 |
11 |
2 |
2247 |
You're looking great for your age...I might even say you're in peak condition! Just bear with me while I run one last test. |
1.2174 |
0.05535 |
92 |
77 |
10 |
5 |
2248 |
I'm going to give you something to help you unwine. |
1.2174 |
0.06486 |
69 |
58 |
7 |
4 |
2249 |
Relax. I'm "Board-Certified" in alternative medicine. |
1.2174 |
0.04845 |
92 |
74 |
16 |
2 |
2250 |
Might I swish you around in my mouth while we await the results? I'm taking a class. |
1.2174 |
0.05086 |
92 |
75 |
14 |
3 |
2251 |
All you need is a good screw. |
1.2174 |
0.05086 |
92 |
75 |
14 |
3 |
2252 |
I’m Dr Cork, your proctologist. |
1.2174 |
0.04845 |
92 |
74 |
16 |
2 |
2253 |
It’s a simple procedure. Just breathe. |
1.2174 |
0.04592 |
92 |
73 |
18 |
1 |
2254 |
It's called trephining. You'll love it. |
1.2174 |
0.05315 |
92 |
76 |
12 |
4 |
2255 |
Good news! A simple extraction will help you to breathe. |
1.2174 |
0.04592 |
92 |
73 |
18 |
1 |
2256 |
You have aged well but it's now time you are the life of the party. |
1.2170 |
0.05017 |
106 |
88 |
13 |
5 |
2257 |
This procedure has known history of benefiting your breathing. |
1.2169 |
0.05434 |
83 |
68 |
12 |
3 |
2258 |
The good news is we no longer use leeches. |
1.2169 |
0.05434 |
83 |
68 |
12 |
3 |
2259 |
Don't worry, it's just a routine check for any fruity, herbal or floral notes. |
1.2169 |
0.04863 |
83 |
66 |
16 |
1 |
2260 |
It’s just a quick procedure to help you breath. |
1.2169 |
0.05156 |
83 |
67 |
14 |
2 |
2261 |
No pressure! I lied!! |
1.2169 |
0.04863 |
83 |
66 |
16 |
1 |
2262 |
This will only hurt foe a minute, then you will breathe better. |
1.2169 |
0.05434 |
83 |
68 |
12 |
3 |
2263 |
Don't worry--this operation has been done a million times. |
1.2169 |
0.05156 |
83 |
67 |
14 |
2 |
2264 |
So I understand your feeling all bottled up - I have a solution for you right here |
1.2169 |
0.05156 |
83 |
67 |
14 |
2 |
2265 |
I'm glad you finally came in. I've been waiting for you all day. |
1.2169 |
0.04863 |
83 |
66 |
16 |
1 |
2266 |
The good news is, you’re in-network. |
1.2169 |
0.05434 |
83 |
68 |
12 |
3 |
2267 |
Why the forlorn look? What could I possibly do to you? |
1.2165 |
0.04687 |
97 |
78 |
17 |
2 |
2268 |
Would you like a drink before we begin? |
1.2165 |
0.04910 |
97 |
79 |
15 |
3 |
2269 |
You're still sweet and delicious! |
1.2165 |
0.04687 |
97 |
78 |
17 |
2 |
2270 |
Your about to get really popular. |
1.2165 |
0.04910 |
97 |
79 |
15 |
3 |
2271 |
Your tests show you have aged fine and we should consider a decanting procedure! |
1.2165 |
0.04687 |
97 |
78 |
17 |
2 |
2272 |
It would be easier if you had a screw cap. |
1.2165 |
0.04910 |
97 |
79 |
15 |
3 |
2273 |
This is going to hurt me more than it’s going to hurt you, down the road. |
1.2165 |
0.04910 |
97 |
79 |
15 |
3 |
2274 |
First the good news. You'll be highly appreciated at my dinner party tonight. |
1.2165 |
0.04910 |
97 |
79 |
15 |
3 |
2275 |
Ok, my dear, just a little pressure… |
1.2165 |
0.04910 |
97 |
79 |
15 |
3 |
2276 |
Hey you’re ok, did I tell you it’s my birthday? |
1.2165 |
0.05719 |
97 |
83 |
7 |
7 |
2277 |
Don't worry Mr. Merlot, this will only hurt a Merlittle. |
1.2162 |
0.06166 |
74 |
62 |
8 |
4 |
2278 |
Oh, you’ll be fine. You just need a little air, and I have just the thing… |
1.2162 |
0.04686 |
111 |
91 |
16 |
4 |
2279 |
Believe me, we're experts in dealing with cases like yours. |
1.2162 |
0.05858 |
74 |
61 |
10 |
3 |
2280 |
I heard you’ve been feeling a lot of pressure. |
1.2159 |
0.04698 |
88 |
70 |
17 |
1 |
2281 |
Sure, it's an anti-body, but the side effects won't lower your tannins or sugar content. |
1.2159 |
0.05225 |
88 |
72 |
13 |
3 |
2282 |
Your records indicate a forty year vintage. |
1.2159 |
0.04968 |
88 |
71 |
15 |
2 |
2283 |
This is probably not the veritas a vino wants to hear... |
1.2159 |
0.04968 |
88 |
71 |
15 |
2 |
2284 |
You’re going to feel a small pinch. |
1.2159 |
0.04968 |
88 |
71 |
15 |
2 |
2285 |
What you need is a good screw. |
1.2159 |
0.05703 |
88 |
74 |
9 |
5 |
2286 |
Don't be concerned, this will help you breath! |
1.2159 |
0.04411 |
88 |
69 |
19 |
0 |
2287 |
How long has it been since your last colonoscopy? |
1.2159 |
0.05469 |
88 |
73 |
11 |
4 |
2288 |
Louis Jadot, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship. |
1.2159 |
0.05225 |
88 |
72 |
13 |
3 |
2289 |
This cure will put a new spin on your condition. |
1.2157 |
0.04542 |
102 |
82 |
18 |
2 |
2290 |
It’s nothing, you’ll just feel a slight pinch. |
1.2157 |
0.05144 |
102 |
85 |
12 |
5 |
2291 |
Relax, I’m a certified acupuncturist. |
1.2157 |
0.05144 |
102 |
85 |
12 |
5 |
2292 |
Unfortunately for you, it's my birthday! Ha, ha. Silly doctor joke. Now, we'll just give you a tranquilizer so you don't feel any pain during your operation. Standard procedure, sir. |
1.2157 |
0.05144 |
102 |
85 |
12 |
5 |
2293 |
Let’s see you if feel half empty or half full |
1.2157 |
0.04951 |
102 |
84 |
14 |
4 |
2294 |
I've got a corker for you! |
1.2155 |
0.05020 |
116 |
98 |
11 |
7 |
2295 |
A simple procedure, it will really help you loosen up. |
1.2154 |
0.04758 |
130 |
110 |
12 |
8 |
2296 |
I'm gonna pop it to ya. |
1.2152 |
0.05603 |
79 |
65 |
11 |
3 |
2297 |
You might feel a little screw. |
1.2152 |
0.04990 |
79 |
63 |
15 |
1 |
2298 |
Do you support the advancement of oenology? |
1.2152 |
0.05305 |
79 |
64 |
13 |
2 |
2299 |
The good news is that your blood looks great. The bad news is that I’m an alcoholic. |
1.2152 |
0.05603 |
79 |
65 |
11 |
3 |
2300 |
And what year were you produced? |
1.2152 |
0.04990 |
79 |
63 |
15 |
1 |
2301 |
I’m afraid we are going to have to open you up… |
1.2152 |
0.05603 |
79 |
65 |
11 |
3 |
2302 |
You may hear a slight pop. |
1.2152 |
0.05305 |
79 |
64 |
13 |
2 |
2303 |
I can relieve that bloated feeling with a simple procedure. It's quick and nearly painless. |
1.2152 |
0.05305 |
79 |
64 |
13 |
2 |
2304 |
It would be unethical of me to screw you. |
1.2152 |
0.05305 |
79 |
64 |
13 |
2 |
2305 |
Maybe I'm paranoid, Doc, but I feel like everyone is out to screw me. |
1.2152 |
0.06155 |
79 |
67 |
7 |
5 |
2306 |
I wanted to be youthanized, not euthanized |
1.2152 |
0.04990 |
79 |
63 |
15 |
1 |
2307 |
Just try not to look at the procedure too metaphorically. |
1.2151 |
0.04798 |
93 |
75 |
16 |
2 |
2308 |
In a minute, I'm going to ask you to breathe. |
1.2151 |
0.05690 |
93 |
79 |
8 |
6 |
2309 |
I just want to let you breathe. |
1.2151 |
0.05036 |
93 |
76 |
14 |
3 |
2310 |
He's a neurologist, I'm an oenologist. |
1.2151 |
0.05036 |
93 |
76 |
14 |
3 |
2311 |
If you think you’re screwed now, wait’ll you get the bill. |
1.2151 |
0.05036 |
93 |
76 |
14 |
3 |
2312 |
Now you may feel a little discomfort but we do recommend it at your vintage. |
1.2151 |
0.04798 |
93 |
75 |
16 |
2 |
2313 |
I’ll guarantee that after a few donations I won’t feel a thing. |
1.2151 |
0.05036 |
93 |
76 |
14 |
3 |
2314 |
You’ll feel a slight pressure, and then we’ll both feel a sensation of release. |
1.2151 |
0.05263 |
93 |
77 |
12 |
4 |
2315 |
No big deal. Think of it as a colonoscopy of the head! |
1.2151 |
0.04798 |
93 |
75 |
16 |
2 |
2316 |
Who said anything about brain surgery? |
1.2151 |
0.05263 |
93 |
77 |
12 |
4 |
2317 |
My specialty, bungology, is both an art and a science. |
1.2151 |
0.05263 |
93 |
77 |
12 |
4 |
2318 |
You're feeling low, but what I'm feeling is Merlot. |
1.2151 |
0.04284 |
93 |
73 |
20 |
0 |
2319 |
Don’t worry…when it’s over, you’ll be able to breathe. |
1.2151 |
0.04798 |
93 |
75 |
16 |
2 |
2320 |
I think I’ve found a win-win solution to all the pressure we’ve both been under lately. |
1.2151 |
0.05481 |
93 |
78 |
10 |
5 |
2321 |
Doc, trust me. I am not the blood of Christ. |
1.2151 |
0.05481 |
93 |
78 |
10 |
5 |
2322 |
Let’s just open you up and see what’s what. |
1.2151 |
0.04798 |
93 |
75 |
16 |
2 |
2323 |
What you need is a good bleeding, and a pairing of smoky gouda |
1.2151 |
0.05481 |
93 |
78 |
10 |
5 |
2324 |
Oh yes, the body cleanse is absolutely necessary, but I think we'll both be satisfied with the outcome. |
1.2150 |
0.04410 |
107 |
86 |
19 |
2 |
2325 |
Remember the bare-footed grape stomping. Well, it won't hurt any more than that. |
1.2150 |
0.04793 |
107 |
88 |
15 |
4 |
2326 |
Most patients report that this treatment really helps them unwind. |
1.2150 |
0.04410 |
107 |
86 |
19 |
2 |
2327 |
Why don't you lie down, and we'll get started. |
1.2143 |
0.04644 |
98 |
79 |
17 |
2 |
2328 |
You seem to be in excellent health. We should do something to celebrate. |
1.2143 |
0.05475 |
98 |
83 |
9 |
6 |
2329 |
Did you say.."I'm Screwed"? |
1.2143 |
0.05636 |
84 |
70 |
10 |
4 |
2330 |
You're requested for party of fifty |
1.2143 |
0.05375 |
84 |
69 |
12 |
3 |
2331 |
Not to worry, I'll relieve some of the pressure and let some oxygen in. |
1.2143 |
0.05077 |
98 |
81 |
13 |
4 |
2332 |
I said "sample to test"....Why on earth would I say "sip to taste"? |
1.2143 |
0.05375 |
84 |
69 |
12 |
3 |
2333 |
It's 5 o'clock somewhere! |
1.2143 |
0.06400 |
70 |
59 |
7 |
4 |
2334 |
It won't hurt, I promise.... |
1.2143 |
0.05101 |
84 |
68 |
14 |
2 |
2335 |
Well, it's maybe against professional ethics, but I'm gonna screw you. |
1.2143 |
0.05717 |
70 |
57 |
11 |
2 |
2336 |
With a little effort, we’re going to get to the bottom of this! |
1.2143 |
0.04644 |
98 |
79 |
17 |
2 |
2337 |
Who told you a colonoscopy feels like a corkscrew ? |
1.2143 |
0.05636 |
84 |
70 |
10 |
4 |
2338 |
No need for a frown — I perform this operation at least once a night. |
1.2143 |
0.06068 |
70 |
58 |
9 |
3 |
2339 |
Afterwards, you can have all the ice cream you want! |
1.2143 |
0.04865 |
98 |
80 |
15 |
3 |
2340 |
Rather shoddy outfit for work, sir. |
1.2143 |
0.05101 |
84 |
68 |
14 |
2 |
2341 |
That's not your tail, is it? |
1.2143 |
0.05077 |
98 |
81 |
13 |
4 |
2342 |
It’s the usual procedure, and we’ll share a glass after it. |
1.2143 |
0.05636 |
84 |
70 |
10 |
4 |
2343 |
Hmm. You say you are a virgin? |
1.2143 |
0.04644 |
98 |
79 |
17 |
2 |
2344 |
Yes, the corkage fee is covered by your insurance plan. |
1.2143 |
0.05101 |
84 |
68 |
14 |
2 |
2345 |
Just relax while we take a look in the old noggin. |
1.2143 |
0.04865 |
98 |
80 |
15 |
3 |
2346 |
Don't worry, you're my third patient this morning. |
1.2143 |
0.05375 |
84 |
69 |
12 |
3 |
2347 |
Have you been screwed before? |
1.2143 |
0.05077 |
98 |
81 |
13 |
4 |
2348 |
I perform this procedure on all my patients when they reach your age. |
1.2143 |
0.05101 |
84 |
68 |
14 |
2 |
2349 |
This procedure might leave you feeling drained. |
1.2143 |
0.05077 |
98 |
81 |
13 |
4 |
2350 |
Having some alcohol in you keeps this from hurting |
1.2143 |
0.05101 |
84 |
68 |
14 |
2 |
2351 |
Well I did say you should get some air |
1.2143 |
0.05101 |
84 |
68 |
14 |
2 |
2352 |
Trust me! I'm a doctor! |
1.2136 |
0.04907 |
103 |
85 |
14 |
4 |
2353 |
We'll do a little test to make sure you're aging like fine wine, and then you can grab some cheese and crackers on your way out. |
1.2136 |
0.05281 |
103 |
87 |
10 |
6 |
2354 |
Don't worry, this little procedure will help you breathe! |
1.2136 |
0.04709 |
103 |
84 |
16 |
3 |
2355 |
It's just a minor surgery... |
1.2135 |
0.04918 |
89 |
72 |
15 |
2 |
2356 |
Let's just take care of that pesky bout of constipation, shall we? |
1.2135 |
0.05171 |
89 |
73 |
13 |
3 |
2357 |
This won't hurt -it just leaves an empty feeling" |
1.2135 |
0.05412 |
89 |
74 |
11 |
4 |
2358 |
I assure you...this won't hurt a bit... |
1.2135 |
0.04918 |
89 |
72 |
15 |
2 |
2359 |
I think I can relieve the pressure you've been experiencing. |
1.2135 |
0.04651 |
89 |
71 |
17 |
1 |
2360 |
I have a solution to your blockage problem |
1.2135 |
0.04918 |
89 |
72 |
15 |
2 |
2361 |
You will just feel a small prick. |
1.2135 |
0.05171 |
89 |
73 |
13 |
3 |
2362 |
a bottle of wine a day keeps the doctor entertained |
1.2135 |
0.04918 |
89 |
72 |
15 |
2 |
2363 |
I'm going to screw with your head a little bit before I write you the prescription |
1.2133 |
0.05787 |
75 |
62 |
10 |
3 |
2364 |
Of course not! You'll have at least another few days. Maybe even a week in the fridge. |
1.2133 |
0.05467 |
75 |
61 |
12 |
2 |
2365 |
I just need a sample and we'll see where to go from there. |
1.2133 |
0.05787 |
75 |
62 |
10 |
3 |
2366 |
Mr. Wineman I have good and bad news. You are aging gracefully, but you are corked! |
1.2133 |
0.05787 |
75 |
62 |
10 |
3 |
2367 |
This may be painful at first, but you will breathe easier. |
1.2130 |
0.04753 |
108 |
89 |
15 |
4 |
2368 |
It’s a simple, painless procedure—one that I’ve done thousands of times. |
1.2130 |
0.04753 |
108 |
89 |
15 |
4 |
2369 |
Stop all your whining or you'll blow your cork! |
1.2128 |
0.04752 |
94 |
76 |
16 |
2 |
2370 |
I see you've aged 10 years since our last appointment |
1.2128 |
0.04987 |
94 |
77 |
14 |
3 |
2371 |
I prefer a twist off cap. |
1.2128 |
0.04505 |
94 |
75 |
18 |
1 |
2372 |
Acidity, fermentation, and tannin results require one more test. |
1.2128 |
0.05427 |
94 |
79 |
10 |
5 |
2373 |
It’s really a quite simple extraction. |
1.2128 |
0.04752 |
94 |
76 |
16 |
2 |
2374 |
Relax, you're not the only one to have a screw loose. |
1.2128 |
0.05427 |
94 |
79 |
10 |
5 |
2375 |
Now, if you’ll bend over slightly this won’t hurt a bit. |
1.2128 |
0.05427 |
94 |
79 |
10 |
5 |
2376 |
Don't worry, this will just help you breathe a little before we begin |
1.2128 |
0.04752 |
94 |
76 |
16 |
2 |
2377 |
I hear you’re under a lot of pressure. |
1.2128 |
0.04244 |
94 |
74 |
20 |
0 |
2378 |
I'm going to help you breathe |
1.2125 |
0.05245 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
2 |
2379 |
Don't worry, I learned all about this in grad school. |
1.2125 |
0.05245 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
2 |
2380 |
I have just the thing for your headache. |
1.2125 |
0.04934 |
80 |
64 |
15 |
1 |
2381 |
It will only feel like a little pinch. |
1.2125 |
0.05245 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
2 |
2382 |
I'm sorry to inform you that due to your age, your time is short. |
1.2125 |
0.05245 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
2 |
2383 |
This won't hurt, it's just a little pinch. |
1.2125 |
0.05539 |
80 |
66 |
11 |
3 |
2384 |
Just a slight pressure. |
1.2125 |
0.05245 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
2 |
2385 |
Yes it's invasive, but it will help you breathe. |
1.2125 |
0.05817 |
80 |
67 |
9 |
4 |
2386 |
Im hosting a dinner party for the hospital staff tonight. I'd love for you to join us. |
1.2125 |
0.05539 |
80 |
66 |
11 |
3 |
2387 |
I know you feel like your emotions are all bottled up inside but I think I have just the thing to help you open up. |
1.2125 |
0.05539 |
80 |
66 |
11 |
3 |
2388 |
The good news is you're perfectly aged. |
1.2125 |
0.05539 |
80 |
66 |
11 |
3 |
2389 |
Remember when I recommended you get more air? |
1.2125 |
0.05539 |
80 |
66 |
11 |
3 |
2390 |
I promise I won’t screw up. |
1.2125 |
0.05539 |
80 |
66 |
11 |
3 |
2391 |
I never thought I’d perform a frontal lobotomy on the bottle in front of me. |
1.2125 |
0.05245 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
2 |
2392 |
Contrary to what you've heard Vern, we are in fact out to screw you. |
1.2125 |
0.05817 |
80 |
67 |
9 |
4 |
2393 |
Let's take a look inside, shall we? |
1.2125 |
0.05245 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
2 |
2394 |
It’s just a tickle |
1.2125 |
0.05245 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
2 |
2395 |
Nothing to worry about…we just need to draw some fluids. |
1.2125 |
0.05245 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
2 |
2396 |
Did I mention I’m writing a book about your exact condition? |
1.2125 |
0.04934 |
80 |
64 |
15 |
1 |
2397 |
Not to worry, I’ve done this procedure hundreds of times. In fact, as recently as last night. |
1.2125 |
0.05245 |
80 |
65 |
13 |
2 |
2398 |
No worries; I'm using the less painful top approach." |
1.2121 |
0.04821 |
99 |
81 |
15 |
3 |
2399 |
Now you're going to feel a little pinch |
1.2121 |
0.05030 |
99 |
82 |
13 |
4 |
2400 |
Uncork and be free! |
1.2121 |
0.04821 |
99 |
81 |
15 |
3 |
2401 |
I understand you wish to donate your remains to gastronomy? |
1.2118 |
0.05317 |
85 |
70 |
12 |
3 |
2402 |
Well, the good news is that you're going to bring smiles to a half-dozen of my friends. |
1.2118 |
0.05317 |
85 |
70 |
12 |
3 |
2403 |
Your purpose? You hold the wine! |
1.2118 |
0.04762 |
85 |
68 |
16 |
1 |
2404 |
Well, the good news is you're not a rosé.. |
1.2118 |
0.05047 |
85 |
69 |
14 |
2 |
2405 |
Just relax. Time to release your inner self. |
1.2118 |
0.04762 |
85 |
68 |
16 |
1 |
2406 |
Don't worry, I do this all the time. |
1.2118 |
0.05047 |
85 |
69 |
14 |
2 |
2407 |
…and the bad news is the same—you got better with age. |
1.2118 |
0.04762 |
85 |
68 |
16 |
1 |
2408 |
Now...if you'll just bend down...we'll take care of that nasty old headache. |
1.2118 |
0.05047 |
85 |
69 |
14 |
2 |
2409 |
Screw, you“can be more than an epithe |
1.2118 |
0.05317 |
85 |
70 |
12 |
3 |
2410 |
Veni. Vidi vino. |
1.2118 |
0.05575 |
85 |
71 |
10 |
4 |
2411 |
It's a simple procedure. You'll be breathing in no time." |
1.2118 |
0.04762 |
85 |
68 |
16 |
1 |
2412 |
You’ll feel a slight pressure at first but as you breath deeply a feeling of euphoria will settle in. |
1.2118 |
0.05575 |
85 |
71 |
10 |
4 |
2413 |
This will open your chakras. |
1.2118 |
0.05575 |
85 |
71 |
10 |
4 |
2414 |
Everyone has to have their first prostate exam eventually, and you’re just about the right age. |
1.2118 |
0.04762 |
85 |
68 |
16 |
1 |
2415 |
Checking your prostate presents a unique challenge. |
1.2115 |
0.05053 |
104 |
87 |
12 |
5 |
2416 |
Are you familiar with Easter, Ramadan or Purim? |
1.2113 |
0.05644 |
71 |
58 |
11 |
2 |
2417 |
‘I’m about to get screwed and you’re smiling. I feel empty already.’ |
1.2113 |
0.06317 |
71 |
60 |
7 |
4 |
2418 |
No tears, please. I said I delight in terroir. |
1.2111 |
0.04869 |
90 |
73 |
15 |
2 |
2419 |
Not to worry! You'll feel a little prick and then soon I'll be feeling no pain. |
1.2111 |
0.04605 |
90 |
72 |
17 |
1 |
2420 |
Now I just need you to is turn your head and cough. |
1.2111 |
0.05585 |
90 |
76 |
9 |
5 |
2421 |
Don't worry, it won't hurt a bit but you might consider a screw top going forward. |
1.2111 |
0.05119 |
90 |
74 |
13 |
3 |
2422 |
Relax, it's a simple procedure, making it easier for you to breathe... |
1.2111 |
0.04869 |
90 |
73 |
15 |
2 |
2423 |
This procedure will allow you to breathe for about ten minutes. |
1.2111 |
0.04869 |
90 |
73 |
15 |
2 |
2424 |
Don’t worry, I always screw up. |
1.2111 |
0.05119 |
90 |
74 |
13 |
3 |
2425 |
Don't worry, you'll just hear a slight pop and then it'll all be over. |
1.2111 |
0.04869 |
90 |
73 |
15 |
2 |
2426 |
Surely, a bold 30 year old Spaniard from the southern Mediterranean coast who pairs magnificently with duck isn't scared of a little needle? |
1.2111 |
0.05119 |
90 |
74 |
13 |
3 |
2427 |
My wife just left me. |
1.2111 |
0.04869 |
90 |
73 |
15 |
2 |
2428 |
This decant, er, can’t hurt a bit |
1.2111 |
0.04605 |
90 |
72 |
17 |
1 |
2429 |
Please don’t wine, it will be over before you know it. |
1.2111 |
0.04869 |
90 |
73 |
15 |
2 |
2430 |
I twist, you shout. |
1.2110 |
0.04137 |
109 |
87 |
21 |
1 |
2431 |
I promise... you will age better. |
1.2105 |
0.04708 |
95 |
77 |
16 |
2 |
2432 |
Oh dear! I did not believe him when he said "I have a screwpulous solution to plug your soul from going bad". |
1.2105 |
0.05161 |
95 |
79 |
12 |
4 |
2433 |
I promise, it's not an injection |
1.2105 |
0.04205 |
95 |
75 |
20 |
0 |
2434 |
Step into my office for an enjoyable treatment |
1.2105 |
0.05402 |
76 |
62 |
12 |
2 |
2435 |
This is not going to hurt at all. |
1.2105 |
0.05717 |
76 |
63 |
10 |
3 |
2436 |
Don't be such a winer. |
1.2105 |
0.04401 |
114 |
93 |
18 |
3 |
2437 |
I am here to relieve your pressure |
1.2105 |
0.04574 |
114 |
94 |
16 |
4 |
2438 |
No pills,no exercise,and your weight goes down smoothly. |
1.2105 |
0.04708 |
95 |
77 |
16 |
2 |
2439 |
The tests came back and your fluids look great. |
1.2105 |
0.04708 |
95 |
77 |
16 |
2 |
2440 |
Just relax, it won't hurt a bit. |
1.2105 |
0.05717 |
76 |
63 |
10 |
3 |
2441 |
So I'm just gonna take a little look inside. |
1.2105 |
0.04940 |
95 |
78 |
14 |
3 |
2442 |
This treatment will help you breathe |
1.2105 |
0.05067 |
76 |
61 |
14 |
1 |
2443 |
We’re just going to open you up so you can breath and then take a look at your legs. |
1.2105 |
0.05067 |
76 |
61 |
14 |
1 |
2444 |
Think of it like this. I’ll have a bottle in front of me and you’ll have a frontal lobotomy. |
1.2105 |
0.05374 |
95 |
80 |
10 |
5 |
2445 |
Next time on Surrealist Proctology Theater... |
1.2105 |
0.04708 |
95 |
77 |
16 |
2 |
2446 |
I guarantee my treatment will release that pressure in your head. |
1.2105 |
0.04463 |
95 |
76 |
18 |
1 |
2447 |
In this line of work, everyone is out to screw you. |
1.2105 |
0.04940 |
95 |
78 |
14 |
3 |
2448 |
Don't worry you're not my first French actress |
1.2105 |
0.05402 |
76 |
62 |
12 |
2 |
2449 |
Just wait until you hear from the billing department, they’re REALLY gonna screw you. |
1.2105 |
0.06016 |
76 |
64 |
8 |
4 |
2450 |
Sorry Vino, but now that you have aged so wonderfully, I need to do a prostate exam. |
1.2100 |
0.05183 |
100 |
84 |
11 |
5 |
2451 |
No, actually this procedure is closer to an enema. |
1.2100 |
0.04777 |
100 |
82 |
15 |
3 |
2452 |
It's a simple procedure; neither one of us will feel a thing. |
1.2100 |
0.04560 |
100 |
81 |
17 |
2 |
2453 |
Don''t worry - today's corks make the procedure completely painless for the patient. |
1.2100 |
0.04333 |
100 |
80 |
19 |
1 |
2454 |
Don't worry. I've done this a thousand times at home. |
1.2099 |
0.05751 |
81 |
68 |
9 |
4 |
2455 |
The lab test indicates excessive fluids throughout your system. |
1.2099 |
0.05751 |
81 |
68 |
9 |
4 |
2456 |
Must be my lucky day !! |
1.2099 |
0.05476 |
81 |
67 |
11 |
3 |
2457 |
Now please bend over and I’ll check your prostate. |
1.2099 |
0.05476 |
81 |
67 |
11 |
3 |
2458 |
Once we remove it, I guarantee you'll breathe better. |
1.2099 |
0.05187 |
81 |
66 |
13 |
2 |
2459 |
Your condition is quite common, but easily treated. |
1.2099 |
0.05187 |
81 |
66 |
13 |
2 |
2460 |
O
You've aged. |
1.2099 |
0.04880 |
81 |
65 |
15 |
1 |
2461 |
Good news/bad news: there is no copay for this visit — but the corkage fee is $5,000. |
1.2099 |
0.05476 |
81 |
67 |
11 |
3 |
2462 |
Don’t whine! You’ll get a lollipop, after! |
1.2099 |
0.05476 |
81 |
67 |
11 |
3 |
2463 |
You needn't worry about this procedure -- I'll be wearing a protective glove. |
1.2099 |
0.05476 |
81 |
67 |
11 |
3 |
2464 |
Yes, you’ll feel a little pinch, but then weight loss is guaranteed. |
1.2099 |
0.05751 |
81 |
68 |
9 |
4 |
2465 |
Good news! Your bloodwork shows a high affinity with full-flavored cheeses! |
1.2099 |
0.05476 |
81 |
67 |
11 |
3 |
2466 |
Insurance covers most of the visit, but not the corking fee |
1.2099 |
0.04553 |
81 |
64 |
17 |
0 |
2467 |
All this would be easier if you were a screw cap. |
1.2099 |
0.05187 |
81 |
66 |
13 |
2 |
2468 |
This procedure will allow you to breathe and free up some head space. |
1.2099 |
0.05187 |
81 |
66 |
13 |
2 |
2469 |
Trust me. Something to help you breath. |
1.2095 |
0.03991 |
105 |
83 |
22 |
0 |
2470 |
No, this can't go in your bottom. |
1.2095 |
0.04426 |
105 |
85 |
18 |
2 |
2471 |
We do these procedures all the time. I think you'll find that letting in some air will improve things markedly. |
1.2095 |
0.04628 |
105 |
86 |
16 |
3 |
2472 |
I was hoping you could stop by for a drink. |
1.2093 |
0.05758 |
86 |
73 |
8 |
5 |
2473 |
Show me yours - and I'll show you mine. |
1.2093 |
0.05261 |
86 |
71 |
12 |
3 |
2474 |
Good news! You're all grapes! |
1.2093 |
0.05515 |
86 |
72 |
10 |
4 |
2475 |
I hear dancing is good to relieve stress. Have you ever heard of The Twist? |
1.2093 |
0.05261 |
86 |
71 |
12 |
3 |
2476 |
So I hear you’re having some trouble breathing? |
1.2093 |
0.04994 |
86 |
70 |
14 |
2 |
2477 |
This procedure won't drain you, trust me I'm a doctor. |
1.2093 |
0.04994 |
86 |
70 |
14 |
2 |
2478 |
I suspect some sort of fluid buildup… Not to worry, I can take care of it :-) |
1.2093 |
0.05261 |
86 |
71 |
12 |
3 |
2479 |
You’ll barely notice it. |
1.2093 |
0.05261 |
86 |
71 |
12 |
3 |
2480 |
You said you didn't have insurance? |
1.2091 |
0.04674 |
110 |
91 |
15 |
4 |
2481 |
You need to breathe. But first...... |
1.2090 |
0.05839 |
67 |
55 |
10 |
2 |
2482 |
Will have to pop open your noggin before I can examine your legs. |
1.2090 |
0.05839 |
67 |
55 |
10 |
2 |
2483 |
In other words, you're screwed. |
1.2090 |
0.05839 |
67 |
55 |
10 |
2 |
2484 |
You're going to feel a little pinch... followed by a loud popping sound. |
1.2088 |
0.04284 |
91 |
72 |
19 |
0 |
2485 |
The bottle in front of me is about to get a frontal lobotomy. |
1.2088 |
0.04560 |
91 |
73 |
17 |
1 |
2486 |
Yes, I'm afraid we're going to operate. On the plus side, you'll be paired with a nice, juicy steak. |
1.2088 |
0.04560 |
91 |
73 |
17 |
1 |
2487 |
You're aging beautifully—it's the best time of your life. |
1.2088 |
0.04821 |
91 |
74 |
15 |
2 |
2488 |
It seems as if your “vino” is about to get “veritas”!! |
1.2088 |
0.04821 |
91 |
74 |
15 |
2 |
2489 |
Where did you say you’re from? |
1.2088 |
0.05303 |
91 |
76 |
11 |
4 |
2490 |
It’s called a lobottlemy. |
1.2088 |
0.05529 |
91 |
77 |
9 |
5 |
2491 |
Don’t worry. You will just feel a pinch and then you will be able to breathe. |
1.2088 |
0.04560 |
91 |
73 |
17 |
1 |
2492 |
'Screwtop,' you say. 'Well, we'll see about that.' |
1.2088 |
0.04821 |
91 |
74 |
15 |
2 |
2493 |
Why don't we start with a little off the top? |
1.2088 |
0.04560 |
91 |
73 |
17 |
1 |
2494 |
The chest are good! So…! |
1.2088 |
0.05068 |
91 |
75 |
13 |
3 |
2495 |
Just relax your neck. |
1.2088 |
0.05068 |
91 |
75 |
13 |
3 |
2496 |
Trust me, it will be an uplifting experience. |
1.2088 |
0.04284 |
91 |
72 |
19 |
0 |
2497 |
I’ve gotta warn you though…it won’t ever feel quite the same if you want it back in. |
1.2088 |
0.05068 |
91 |
75 |
13 |
3 |
2498 |
I promise I’ll be very gentle. |
1.2087 |
0.04537 |
115 |
95 |
16 |
4 |
2499 |
Yes, I'm bored certified. |
1.2083 |
0.04663 |
96 |
78 |
16 |
2 |
2500 |
I need a red blood cell sample and it won't hurt a bit. |
1.2083 |
0.05112 |
96 |
80 |
12 |
4 |
2501 |
You will just feel a little prick and then everyone will fell better |
1.2083 |
0.05573 |
72 |
59 |
11 |
2 |
2502 |
Relax! According to 90% of the studies I’ve seen on the news, you’re healthy. |
1.2083 |
0.05210 |
72 |
58 |
13 |
1 |
2503 |
Not you again . . . |
1.2083 |
0.05210 |
72 |
58 |
13 |
1 |
2504 |
Take a pairing and call me in the morning. |
1.2083 |
0.05913 |
72 |
60 |
9 |
3 |
2505 |
Its a little like anal intercouse. You won't mind it A bit. |
1.2083 |
0.05573 |
72 |
59 |
11 |
2 |
2506 |
Don't worry, it's just a simple procedure. I've done hundreds of these. You'll be back on your feet in no time! |
1.2083 |
0.05112 |
96 |
80 |
12 |
4 |
2507 |
I’need you to be open with me. |
1.2083 |
0.04167 |
96 |
76 |
20 |
0 |
2508 |
Just don’t look and you’ll be fine. |
1.2083 |
0.04893 |
96 |
79 |
14 |
3 |
2509 |
Hey, how ya doin? |
1.2083 |
0.04893 |
96 |
79 |
14 |
3 |
2510 |
Is this covered by my insurance? |
1.2083 |
0.06235 |
72 |
61 |
7 |
4 |
2511 |
Today YOU are going to make ME feel better |
1.2083 |
0.05913 |
72 |
60 |
9 |
3 |
2512 |
I'll release the pressure and you'll feel the BEST you have EVER felt in your life. |
1.2079 |
0.04295 |
101 |
81 |
19 |
1 |
2513 |
I need to remove the obstruction. |
1.2079 |
0.04734 |
101 |
83 |
15 |
3 |
2514 |
Surprise! |
1.2079 |
0.04295 |
101 |
81 |
19 |
1 |
2515 |
I never screw up, but in this case... |
1.2079 |
0.04939 |
101 |
84 |
13 |
4 |
2516 |
You should come for physicals more regularly |
1.2079 |
0.04520 |
101 |
82 |
17 |
2 |
2517 |
But I don't feel loved afterward, I just feel empty and screwed! |
1.2078 |
0.05008 |
77 |
62 |
14 |
1 |
2518 |
When a man sees me with this tool, he runs from the room. |
1.2078 |
0.05944 |
77 |
65 |
8 |
4 |
2519 |
Don't worry, I'm just going to screw around with you so you can breathe easier. |
1.2078 |
0.05649 |
77 |
64 |
10 |
3 |
2520 |
At your age, you shouldn't really give a shit if it hurts or not. |
1.2078 |
0.05649 |
77 |
64 |
10 |
3 |
2521 |
You will feel a sharp jab and then a draining sensation. |
1.2078 |
0.05649 |
77 |
64 |
10 |
3 |
2522 |
I'll be frank, Franc |
1.2078 |
0.05649 |
77 |
64 |
10 |
3 |
2523 |
Let's make sure you're really improving with age. |
1.2078 |
0.05338 |
77 |
63 |
12 |
2 |
2524 |
Unfortunately your insurance doesn’t cover corkage. |
1.2078 |
0.05008 |
77 |
62 |
14 |
1 |
2525 |
Bend over and say ah |
1.2078 |
0.05649 |
77 |
64 |
10 |
3 |
2526 |
I'm gonna need you to trust me on this one... |
1.2078 |
0.05338 |
77 |
63 |
12 |
2 |
2527 |
Don't worry, it's 5 o'clock somewhere |
1.2078 |
0.05944 |
77 |
65 |
8 |
4 |
2528 |
This will only hurt for a moment. The good news is: they're not big drinkers at the table, so you'll be around for quite a while. |
1.2078 |
0.05944 |
77 |
65 |
8 |
4 |
2529 |
Relax. You’re not going to get screwed. |
1.2078 |
0.05649 |
77 |
64 |
10 |
3 |
2530 |
Open up, please |
1.2078 |
0.05008 |
77 |
62 |
14 |
1 |
2531 |
It's a simple procedure but has a complex finish. |
1.2078 |
0.05338 |
77 |
63 |
12 |
2 |
2532 |
I might have a drinking problem |
1.2078 |
0.05338 |
77 |
63 |
12 |
2 |
2533 |
I have a technique that's going to help you breathe. |
1.2073 |
0.05415 |
82 |
68 |
11 |
3 |
2534 |
It's a little procedure to help those of your age to you loosen up and breath. |
1.2073 |
0.05415 |
82 |
68 |
11 |
3 |
2535 |
Doctor, put that thing away before I blow my cork. |
1.2073 |
0.04827 |
82 |
66 |
15 |
1 |
2536 |
Open wide! |
1.2073 |
0.05129 |
82 |
67 |
13 |
2 |
2537 |
There'll be a little sting |
1.2073 |
0.05129 |
82 |
67 |
13 |
2 |
2538 |
We find this procedure is tolerated quite well in most cases. |
1.2073 |
0.05415 |
82 |
68 |
11 |
3 |
2539 |
Would you be offended if I said you were the most full bodied red I’ve ever operated on? |
1.2073 |
0.05945 |
82 |
70 |
7 |
5 |
2540 |
I promise, as a Doctor of Internal Medicine, you are a panacea. |
1.2073 |
0.05129 |
82 |
67 |
13 |
2 |
2541 |
Trust me-- after this you’ll be able to breathe |
1.2073 |
0.05415 |
82 |
68 |
11 |
3 |
2542 |
I see that you've been under a lot of pressure lately. I have something that I think will help. |
1.2073 |
0.04827 |
82 |
66 |
15 |
1 |
2543 |
Just a small incision and we will have that fluid drained for you. |
1.2073 |
0.05129 |
82 |
67 |
13 |
2 |
2544 |
The French pioneered this procedure. |
1.2073 |
0.05129 |
82 |
67 |
13 |
2 |
2545 |
Good news! We’ve found a solution for your fluid retention issue. |
1.2073 |
0.05129 |
82 |
67 |
13 |
2 |
2546 |
First the good news—you were born in a very tasty year. |
1.2073 |
0.05415 |
82 |
68 |
11 |
3 |
2547 |
You've got great legs |
1.2073 |
0.05129 |
82 |
67 |
13 |
2 |
2548 |
How do I screw thee? Let me count the ways. |
1.2073 |
0.05415 |
82 |
68 |
11 |
3 |
2549 |
It won't hurt, but you may let out a little wine. |
1.2073 |
0.05129 |
82 |
67 |
13 |
2 |
2550 |
At your age, this is common; don’t pop your cork over it. |
1.2073 |
0.05129 |
82 |
67 |
13 |
2 |
2551 |
I'm a doctor, I'd never screw you over. |
1.2073 |
0.04504 |
82 |
65 |
17 |
0 |
2552 |
Don't worry, it's minimally invasive. I'm just going to have a quick look inside. |
1.2072 |
0.04267 |
111 |
90 |
19 |
2 |
2553 |
I'm not sure if this is ethically questionable, but I'm going to prescribe myself a glass of you. |
1.2072 |
0.04455 |
111 |
91 |
17 |
3 |
2554 |
Decanting is truly the best way to address what's bottled up. |
1.2069 |
0.04942 |
87 |
71 |
14 |
2 |
2555 |
I'm not really a doctor I just play one in commercials. |
1.2069 |
0.04942 |
87 |
71 |
14 |
2 |
2556 |
Open wide and let's take a look. |
1.2069 |
0.05456 |
87 |
73 |
10 |
4 |
2557 |
Just a little poke. Remember that you're doing this for the good of your community. |
1.2069 |
0.05456 |
87 |
73 |
10 |
4 |
2558 |
Well, it's actually BECAUSE of your vintage that I feel we need to move forward with this procedure. |
1.2069 |
0.05456 |
87 |
73 |
10 |
4 |
2559 |
You could say that this is a once in a lifetime type procedure. |
1.2069 |
0.04942 |
87 |
71 |
14 |
2 |
2560 |
We serve no wine before it's time and lucky for me, It's time! |
1.2069 |
0.04664 |
87 |
70 |
16 |
1 |
2561 |
Now that you've aged... |
1.2069 |
0.05206 |
87 |
72 |
12 |
3 |
2562 |
Relax, all your friends are doing it. |
1.2069 |
0.05206 |
87 |
72 |
12 |
3 |
2563 |
This next procedure will allow you to breath better |
1.2069 |
0.05206 |
87 |
72 |
12 |
3 |
2564 |
Nurse Ratched will be in shortly to assist with the procedure. |
1.2069 |
0.04942 |
87 |
71 |
14 |
2 |
2565 |
My diagnosis is you're soon to be screwed. |
1.2065 |
0.04516 |
92 |
74 |
17 |
1 |
2566 |
This will help with that bloated feeling. |
1.2065 |
0.04773 |
92 |
75 |
15 |
2 |
2567 |
We just need a small sample for your lab work. |
1.2065 |
0.04516 |
92 |
74 |
17 |
1 |
2568 |
No, aeration isn't entirely non-invasive. |
1.2065 |
0.04516 |
92 |
74 |
17 |
1 |
2569 |
Just to be sure, we're going to need a five-ounce sample. |
1.2065 |
0.04516 |
92 |
74 |
17 |
1 |
2570 |
This will only hurt a little. |
1.2065 |
0.05017 |
92 |
76 |
13 |
3 |
2571 |
I'll be the first to admit it, Vinny -- you're getting screwed. |
1.2065 |
0.05250 |
92 |
77 |
11 |
4 |
2572 |
Are you just going to sit there and wine all day? |
1.2065 |
0.05017 |
92 |
76 |
13 |
3 |
2573 |
You may feel a slight pushing sensation during the procedure. |
1.2065 |
0.04244 |
92 |
73 |
19 |
0 |
2574 |
You've come through the examination with flying colours. Whad'ya say we celebrate? |
1.2065 |
0.05250 |
92 |
77 |
11 |
4 |
2575 |
Wait a minute! I thought the guidelines said I didn't need this for ten years. |
1.2065 |
0.04773 |
92 |
75 |
15 |
2 |
2576 |
While invasive this test is recommended for those as well aged as you. |
1.2065 |
0.04244 |
92 |
73 |
19 |
0 |
2577 |
Yes, it'll help you breathe but the corkage fee is all out-of-pocket. |
1.2065 |
0.05017 |
92 |
76 |
13 |
3 |
2578 |
I took your case to an oenologist and guess what? We're in complete agreement. |
1.2062 |
0.05064 |
97 |
81 |
12 |
4 |
2579 |
You want to know if it’s treatable, for someone of your vintage?
It’s not only treatable, it’s going to be quite enjoyable. |
1.2062 |
0.05064 |
97 |
81 |
12 |
4 |
2580 |
Not to worry. The corking fee is covered by your HMO. |
1.2062 |
0.04381 |
97 |
78 |
18 |
1 |
2581 |
Remain distilled and breathe. |
1.2062 |
0.04620 |
97 |
79 |
16 |
2 |
2582 |
I see you getting screwed in the very near future.... |
1.2062 |
0.04381 |
97 |
78 |
18 |
1 |
2583 |
Constipation? Feeling bottled up? I have just the cure. |
1.2062 |
0.04847 |
97 |
80 |
14 |
3 |
2584 |
I will need a blood sample after all, Mr. Chianti. You’ll pair nicely with my next patient, Mr. Parmigiana. |
1.2062 |
0.04620 |
97 |
79 |
16 |
2 |
2585 |
This is gonna hurt you more than it is me! |
1.2062 |
0.04381 |
97 |
78 |
18 |
1 |
2586 |
You are about to give birth to a healthy rosé. |
1.2062 |
0.05271 |
97 |
82 |
10 |
5 |
2587 |
Would you prefer a colonoscopy? |
1.2059 |
0.05760 |
68 |
56 |
10 |
2 |
2588 |
I think I can help you lose some weight. |
1.2059 |
0.04258 |
102 |
82 |
19 |
1 |
2589 |
Hi! I'm Doctor Sokol and I've come to take your temperature. |
1.2059 |
0.04258 |
102 |
82 |
19 |
1 |
2590 |
You’ll love the new you after the decanting procedure. |
1.2059 |
0.04940 |
68 |
54 |
14 |
0 |
2591 |
I promise you'll only feel a little pinch."
Barbara Frankel, Davis, C |
1.2059 |
0.04692 |
102 |
84 |
15 |
3 |
2592 |
Screwed again? |
1.2055 |
0.05839 |
73 |
61 |
9 |
3 |
2593 |
....but you'll breathe so much better when it's over... |
1.2055 |
0.05503 |
73 |
60 |
11 |
2 |
2594 |
Afterwards just breathe.....then cough |
1.2055 |
0.05839 |
73 |
61 |
9 |
3 |
2595 |
The good news is that we can rule constipation out. |
1.2055 |
0.05839 |
73 |
61 |
9 |
3 |
2596 |
Just lie back and relax. You might feel just a slight pinch. |
1.2054 |
0.04233 |
112 |
91 |
19 |
2 |
2597 |
I understand you're having trouble breathing. |
1.2051 |
0.04602 |
78 |
62 |
16 |
0 |
2598 |
Having trouble breathing? |
1.2051 |
0.04950 |
78 |
63 |
14 |
1 |
2599 |
It's a win-win. You'll feel less bottled up. And I'll be smashed. |
1.2051 |
0.05583 |
78 |
65 |
10 |
3 |
2600 |
You were assigned red but you've always felt white, so I'm going to make you the first trans wine. |
1.2051 |
0.05873 |
78 |
66 |
8 |
4 |
2601 |
Cheese probe? |
1.2051 |
0.05276 |
78 |
64 |
12 |
2 |
2602 |
It's nothing, simply a back scratcher |
1.2048 |
0.05355 |
83 |
69 |
11 |
3 |
2603 |
Take off your pants. |
1.2048 |
0.05355 |
83 |
69 |
11 |
3 |
2604 |
Don’t worry. It’s just like a normal rectal exam. |
1.2048 |
0.05355 |
83 |
69 |
11 |
3 |
2605 |
I promise I won’t screw you up! |
1.2048 |
0.04775 |
83 |
67 |
15 |
1 |
2606 |
No worries! Some corks get a kick out of it! |
1.2048 |
0.05355 |
83 |
69 |
11 |
3 |
2607 |
Trust me. I have the solution to relieve your headache. |
1.2048 |
0.05073 |
83 |
68 |
13 |
2 |
2608 |
This will only sting for a second. |
1.2048 |
0.05355 |
83 |
69 |
11 |
3 |
2609 |
I have just the thing to relieve your alchohol dependence. |
1.2048 |
0.05355 |
83 |
69 |
11 |
3 |
2610 |
You are about to be screwed. |
1.2048 |
0.05878 |
83 |
71 |
7 |
5 |
2611 |
Remember that old saying, "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me ..." |
1.2048 |
0.05623 |
83 |
70 |
9 |
4 |
2612 |
I promise to be gentle. |
1.2048 |
0.04775 |
83 |
67 |
15 |
1 |
2613 |
Did I say glass? Oh, ha! I meant vial. We just need a vial |
1.2048 |
0.05623 |
83 |
70 |
9 |
4 |
2614 |
so I says to the rabbi, the priest.. |
1.2048 |
0.05355 |
83 |
69 |
11 |
3 |
2615 |
It's just a routine cork up, nothing serious |
1.2048 |
0.05355 |
83 |
69 |
11 |
3 |
2616 |
If you think you're about to get screwed now, just wait until you see the bill. |
1.2045 |
0.05399 |
88 |
74 |
10 |
4 |
2617 |
Someone told me it's your birthday. How many years has it been? |
1.2045 |
0.05863 |
88 |
76 |
6 |
6 |
2618 |
Oh quit your whining, see what I did there? But really this is going to hurt. |
1.2045 |
0.04617 |
88 |
71 |
16 |
1 |
2619 |
Time to uncork? Or wait for the fuller body? |
1.2045 |
0.04891 |
88 |
72 |
14 |
2 |
2620 |
You’ll feel a small pinch, but after the pressure is released, you’ll feel so much better. |
1.2045 |
0.04891 |
88 |
72 |
14 |
2 |
2621 |
You'll only feel a little pinch. |
1.2045 |
0.04891 |
88 |
72 |
14 |
2 |
2622 |
I think you’re a great candidate for a revolutionary weight-loss program. |
1.2045 |
0.05399 |
88 |
74 |
10 |
4 |
2623 |
Does it help to know you will be served at the indictment party?" |
1.2045 |
0.04617 |
88 |
71 |
16 |
1 |
2624 |
This calls for a corkectomy. |
1.2045 |
0.04891 |
88 |
72 |
14 |
2 |
2625 |
We send the sample to the lab for analysis with aged gouda. |
1.2045 |
0.04617 |
88 |
71 |
16 |
1 |
2626 |
I'm afraid that everyday can't be a rosé day. |
1.2045 |
0.04891 |
88 |
72 |
14 |
2 |
2627 |
Well yes, it is like acupuncture, in a roundabout sort of way. 😁 |
1.2045 |
0.05399 |
88 |
74 |
10 |
4 |
2628 |
Typically you have to wait for insurance to get screwed this big. |
1.2045 |
0.05636 |
88 |
75 |
8 |
5 |
2629 |
This will only hurt just a drop |
1.2045 |
0.04891 |
88 |
72 |
14 |
2 |
2630 |
I apologize for the long wait, but I am now ready to serve you. |
1.2043 |
0.04204 |
93 |
74 |
19 |
0 |
2631 |
So what do you think doctor? Am I screwed? |
1.2043 |
0.05198 |
93 |
78 |
11 |
4 |
2632 |
The good news is that we won't be using any needles... |
1.2043 |
0.04727 |
93 |
76 |
15 |
2 |
2633 |
The prune juice isn't working, Doc. I need some relief. |
1.2043 |
0.04727 |
93 |
76 |
15 |
2 |
2634 |
You aren’t going to cork, but you are still screwed. |
1.2043 |
0.04727 |
93 |
76 |
15 |
2 |
2635 |
Now just turn you head and cough. |
1.2043 |
0.05630 |
93 |
80 |
7 |
6 |
2636 |
Ever have a corkonoscopy? |
1.2043 |
0.05198 |
93 |
78 |
11 |
4 |
2637 |
Just one more little procedure,and then we can have a drink. |
1.2043 |
0.04727 |
93 |
76 |
15 |
2 |
2638 |
Top or bottom? |
1.2043 |
0.04727 |
93 |
76 |
15 |
2 |
2639 |
You’ll be happy to know that there is no co-pay for this procedure |
1.2043 |
0.04968 |
93 |
77 |
13 |
3 |
2640 |
I assure you, there’ll be no corkage fee. |
1.2043 |
0.04968 |
93 |
77 |
13 |
3 |
2641 |
No, but I drank a lot of beer in college. |
1.2043 |
0.04473 |
93 |
75 |
17 |
1 |
2642 |
Now you are going to feel a tiny pinch. |
1.2041 |
0.04577 |
98 |
80 |
16 |
2 |
2643 |
I can remove that, but your insurance won't cover the corking fee. |
1.2041 |
0.04577 |
98 |
80 |
16 |
2 |
2644 |
I’ve done this a thousand times.
You’ll feel clean as a whistle. |
1.2041 |
0.04802 |
98 |
81 |
14 |
3 |
2645 |
We need a little larger blood draw than usual. |
1.2041 |
0.04577 |
98 |
80 |
16 |
2 |
2646 |
You’ll just feel a minor pinch. |
1.2041 |
0.04577 |
98 |
80 |
16 |
2 |
2647 |
Now, we need to check this bitter aftertaste that you're experiencing |
1.2041 |
0.04577 |
98 |
80 |
16 |
2 |
2648 |
I'll need you to bend over. |
1.2039 |
0.05043 |
103 |
87 |
11 |
5 |
2649 |
Relax! This will hurt me more than it hurts you. |
1.2039 |
0.04441 |
103 |
84 |
17 |
2 |
2650 |
The good news is I don't need to check your prostate today. |
1.2037 |
0.04880 |
108 |
91 |
12 |
5 |
2651 |
Don't worry, it's just a quick little stick. You won't feel it at all! |
1.2037 |
0.04699 |
108 |
90 |
14 |
4 |
2652 |
Unfortunately your insurance doesn’t cover cork removal. |
1.2037 |
0.04699 |
108 |
90 |
14 |
4 |
2653 |
Oh, don't worry. No finger this time. |
1.2037 |
0.04511 |
108 |
89 |
16 |
3 |
2654 |
You won't even notice it! |
1.2031 |
0.06370 |
64 |
54 |
7 |
3 |
2655 |
It has to come out! |
1.2031 |
0.05537 |
64 |
52 |
11 |
1 |
2656 |
You will breathe better after this. |
1.2029 |
0.05684 |
69 |
57 |
10 |
2 |
2657 |
It’s happy hour for everyone… except you. |
1.2029 |
0.05296 |
69 |
56 |
12 |
1 |
2658 |
So your insurance doesn't cover twist offs. |
1.2029 |
0.05684 |
69 |
57 |
10 |
2 |
2659 |
Ve haf vays to relieve your liquid assets blockage. |
1.2027 |
0.05766 |
74 |
62 |
9 |
3 |
2660 |
Why Mr. Cabernet, what a nice long nose you have... |
1.2027 |
0.05435 |
74 |
61 |
11 |
2 |
2661 |
I like a full body with a great bouquet. |
1.2027 |
0.05766 |
74 |
62 |
9 |
3 |
2662 |
You did say you wanted a leading role. |
1.2027 |
0.05766 |
74 |
62 |
9 |
3 |
2663 |
please face your label towards me and it will all be over in mere seconds. |
1.2027 |
0.05083 |
74 |
60 |
13 |
1 |
2664 |
Cheer up--your body's fine, and your nose is even finer! |
1.2027 |
0.05083 |
74 |
60 |
13 |
1 |
2665 |
It’s not too painful, although it might make you whine. |
1.2027 |
0.05083 |
74 |
60 |
13 |
1 |
2666 |
So, how did the prep go? |
1.2027 |
0.05083 |
74 |
60 |
13 |
1 |
2667 |
Ever heard of trephining? |
1.2025 |
0.04894 |
79 |
64 |
14 |
1 |
2668 |
This procedure beats antacids! |
1.2025 |
0.04894 |
79 |
64 |
14 |
1 |
2669 |
So you requested dance therapy. Let's start with a quick Twist. |
1.2025 |
0.04894 |
79 |
64 |
14 |
1 |
2670 |
I'll have this bottle open faster than you can say "malpractice"! |
1.2025 |
0.05804 |
79 |
67 |
8 |
4 |
2671 |
We need to test for secondary and tertiary aromas. |
1.2025 |
0.05215 |
79 |
65 |
12 |
2 |
2672 |
This is a minimally invasive procedure |
1.2025 |
0.05518 |
79 |
66 |
10 |
3 |
2673 |
Did you drink all of the prep stuff? |
1.2025 |
0.05215 |
79 |
65 |
12 |
2 |
2674 |
And now for your corkonoscopy! |
1.2025 |
0.05804 |
79 |
67 |
8 |
4 |
2675 |
It's relatively non-invasive and the side effects include permanent loss of cork and contents. But your complexion will be much clearer! |
1.2025 |
0.05518 |
79 |
66 |
10 |
3 |
2676 |
The Rhône Valley is out of network, but this procedure is free to anyone over 50. |
1.2025 |
0.04894 |
79 |
64 |
14 |
1 |
2677 |
You'll be fine once we've relieved the pressure on your brain |
1.2025 |
0.05804 |
79 |
67 |
8 |
4 |
2678 |
No,really,it won’t hurt a bit. |
1.2025 |
0.05518 |
79 |
66 |
10 |
3 |
2679 |
Take a deep breath, this won’t hurt a bit |
1.2025 |
0.05215 |
79 |
65 |
12 |
2 |
2680 |
Given your age we’ll need a full body exam. |
1.2024 |
0.05297 |
84 |
70 |
11 |
3 |
2681 |
You'll just feel a burning sensation. |
1.2024 |
0.05561 |
84 |
71 |
9 |
4 |
2682 |
A frontal lobotomy on a bottle in front of me! |
1.2024 |
0.05297 |
84 |
70 |
11 |
3 |
2683 |
Remember when I described how wine can cause headaches? |
1.2024 |
0.05019 |
84 |
69 |
13 |
2 |
2684 |
Don't worry, I've done this procedure a million times. And I graduated at the bottom of my glass! |
1.2024 |
0.05813 |
84 |
72 |
7 |
5 |
2685 |
I'm with the government and I'm here to help. |
1.2024 |
0.05019 |
84 |
69 |
13 |
2 |
2686 |
Oh I'm not a doctor. I'm a sommelier, and I'll be serving you after your routine corkectomy. |
1.2024 |
0.05813 |
84 |
72 |
7 |
5 |
2687 |
No, I'm quite sure you won't need a repeat in 5 years. |
1.2024 |
0.04410 |
84 |
67 |
17 |
0 |
2688 |
Now just breathe." |
1.2024 |
0.04410 |
84 |
67 |
17 |
0 |
2689 |
I prefer to think of it as a release of your inner goodness! |
1.2024 |
0.04724 |
84 |
68 |
15 |
1 |
2690 |
It's just a quick procedure to drain excess fluid. |
1.2024 |
0.05297 |
84 |
70 |
11 |
3 |
2691 |
The nurse said you are at room temperature, so that's very exciting. |
1.2024 |
0.05561 |
84 |
71 |
9 |
4 |
2692 |
I'm your designated doctor. |
1.2024 |
0.05019 |
84 |
69 |
13 |
2 |
2693 |
Good news. I’ve got something for that ‘bottled-up’ feeling you’ve been complaining about. |
1.2024 |
0.04410 |
84 |
67 |
17 |
0 |
2694 |
I’m under a lot of pressure. I need something to take the edge off. Relax, this will help you breathe a little easier. |
1.2024 |
0.05561 |
84 |
71 |
9 |
4 |
2695 |
I’m really afraid of needles. Don’t worry, we won’t be using any needles today. |
1.2024 |
0.05297 |
84 |
70 |
11 |
3 |
2696 |
After all, you can't spell terroir without terror |
1.2022 |
0.05099 |
89 |
74 |
12 |
3 |
2697 |
Just bend forward; it won't hurt a bit. |
1.2022 |
0.05099 |
89 |
74 |
12 |
3 |
2698 |
This should relieve your constipation and, trust me, won't hurt a bit |
1.2022 |
0.04842 |
89 |
73 |
14 |
2 |
2699 |
As luck would have it, you are my last patient on what has been a very busy Friday. |
1.2022 |
0.05343 |
89 |
75 |
10 |
4 |
2700 |
I'm just going to take a little fluid off your brain. |
1.2022 |
0.04842 |
89 |
73 |
14 |
2 |
2701 |
It's the most effective treatment for your tannic attacks. |
1.2022 |
0.04842 |
89 |
73 |
14 |
2 |
2702 |
But Doc, I said "shrewd!" |
1.2022 |
0.05099 |
89 |
74 |
12 |
3 |
2703 |
Trust me, it works for any age. It'll relieve that stuffy, congested feeling. |
1.2022 |
0.05099 |
89 |
74 |
12 |
3 |
2704 |
This might tickle a little but trust me you’re going to feel 25 ounces lighter when we’re done! |
1.2022 |
0.05099 |
89 |
74 |
12 |
3 |
2705 |
Yes, fine is a good way to describe how you're aging, however, there is one more test... |
1.2022 |
0.05099 |
89 |
74 |
12 |
3 |
2706 |
A corkectomy is like a vasectomy….with just a bit more leakage. |
1.2022 |
0.04842 |
89 |
73 |
14 |
2 |
2707 |
In med school I did a rotation as a sommelier. |
1.2022 |
0.04842 |
89 |
73 |
14 |
2 |
2708 |
Your cork isn't the only thing that's going to get screwed tonight! |
1.2022 |
0.04842 |
89 |
73 |
14 |
2 |
2709 |
Turn around, and cough for me |
1.2022 |
0.04842 |
89 |
73 |
14 |
2 |
2710 |
Good News!
You've just been selected to receive our wine lobotomy of the month. |
1.2021 |
0.04920 |
94 |
78 |
13 |
3 |
2711 |
I’m here to help you pour out your feelings of despair |
1.2021 |
0.04920 |
94 |
78 |
13 |
3 |
2712 |
I have just the right tool to help you breathe. |
1.2021 |
0.04430 |
94 |
76 |
17 |
1 |
2713 |
May I buy you dinner? |
1.2021 |
0.05574 |
94 |
81 |
7 |
6 |
2714 |
Let’s relieve some of that pressure you’ve been feeling.” |
1.2021 |
0.04920 |
94 |
78 |
13 |
3 |
2715 |
Try to relax as much as possible. It'll just be a little pinch. |
1.2021 |
0.04682 |
94 |
77 |
15 |
2 |
2716 |
Just take a deep breath and breathe. |
1.2021 |
0.04920 |
94 |
78 |
13 |
3 |
2717 |
A routine decanting is recommended every five years. |
1.2021 |
0.04920 |
94 |
78 |
13 |
3 |
2718 |
It's widely recommended for a wine or your bottle age. |
1.2020 |
0.04758 |
99 |
82 |
14 |
3 |
2719 |
Don't worry, we've done this procedure many times, and I can assure you we've never screwed up..." |
1.2020 |
0.04536 |
99 |
81 |
16 |
2 |
2720 |
Don't be scared, I just have a few screws loose. |
1.2020 |
0.04969 |
99 |
83 |
12 |
4 |
2721 |
Congratulations! You are old enough to get screwed. |
1.2020 |
0.04758 |
99 |
82 |
14 |
3 |
2722 |
It won't hurt. I'm a Proctologist |
1.2020 |
0.04056 |
99 |
79 |
20 |
0 |
2723 |
No, I won't be using this to check your prostrate. |
1.2020 |
0.04758 |
99 |
82 |
14 |
3 |
2724 |
I prefer to have a bottle in front of me, than a... |
1.2020 |
0.04302 |
99 |
80 |
18 |
1 |
2725 |
Surgery? Give me a moment to breathe... |
1.2000 |
0.04839 |
80 |
65 |
14 |
1 |
2726 |
Relax, it won't hurt a bit! |
1.2000 |
0.05454 |
80 |
67 |
10 |
3 |
2727 |
Only one last time I get to screw you. |
1.2000 |
0.04020 |
100 |
80 |
20 |
0 |
2728 |
Time to check your legs! |
1.2000 |
0.04364 |
105 |
86 |
17 |
2 |
2729 |
The good news is, having a glass of red wine is good for MY heart... |
1.2000 |
0.04793 |
90 |
74 |
14 |
2 |
2730 |
I think I can help you with your breathing problem, Mr. Merlot. |
1.2000 |
0.05228 |
70 |
57 |
12 |
1 |
2731 |
I have just the thing to remove that congestion so you can breathe. |
1.2000 |
0.04126 |
95 |
76 |
19 |
0 |
2732 |
We've developed a new, experimental treatment to help you open up. |
1.2000 |
0.04674 |
85 |
69 |
15 |
1 |
2733 |
Now, if you could please bend over... |
1.2000 |
0.05156 |
80 |
66 |
12 |
2 |
2734 |
Fortunately, we have the latest technology for your, ahem, examination... |
1.2000 |
0.04965 |
85 |
70 |
13 |
2 |
2735 |
You are in peak condition! |
1.2000 |
0.05369 |
75 |
62 |
11 |
2 |
2736 |
Just think of it as a shorter colonoscopy. |
1.2000 |
0.05156 |
80 |
66 |
12 |
2 |
2737 |
What makes you think you will be screwed? |
1.2000 |
0.05239 |
85 |
71 |
11 |
3 |
2738 |
Trust me, bottling it all up is bad for your vintage |
1.2000 |
0.05737 |
80 |
68 |
8 |
4 |
2739 |
It is just a little pinch. |
1.2000 |
0.04965 |
85 |
70 |
13 |
2 |
2740 |
It sounds like you're a bit stopped up. I've got just the thing! |
1.2000 |