Contest #830


Cartoon

830

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. "Well, of course I'm being defensive."
  2. "My biggest fear is sudden death."
  3. "Are our ninety minutes about up?"


Name Value
Submission deadline 2022-12-04T23:13:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2022-12-18T23:13:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2022-12-12T23:13:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued December 19, 2022
Number of captions 4930
Number of responses 540717
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Well of course I’m being defensive! 1.7834 0.01487 2802 1237 935 630
1 Can we not talk about goals this week? 1.7697 0.02218 1255 565 414 276
2 Yes, I KNOW I'm blocking. That's the whole point. 1.7456 0.01753 2001 934 642 425
3 I think people are always trying to put something past me.... 1.7442 0.01695 2068 946 705 417
4 But what about my own goals? 1.7441 0.01719 2024 930 682 412
5 I’m defensive because he’s a little forward. 1.7415 0.02477 975 450 327 198
6 It's like they enjoy taking shots at me. 1.7388 0.01904 1612 736 561 315
7 My biggest fear is sudden death. 1.7295 0.01375 3198 1516 1031 651
8 This isn’t what I expected by post game analysis. 1.7215 0.01970 1623 800 475 348
9 It seems that everyone around me is so goal-oriented. 1.7188 0.01700 2077 997 667 413
10 But, my objective is to have no goals. 1.7186 0.01843 1798 873 558 367
11 Is he still there? 1.7103 0.01317 3835 1992 962 881
12 It just feels like I spend so much time focused on other people’s goals instead of my own. 1.7094 0.01831 1810 888 560 362
13 I make one little mistake at work, and everyone starts screaming at me. 1.6992 0.01769 1888 927 602 359
14 And then, it hit me. 1.6928 0.01478 2712 1347 851 514
15 I see the ball coming and that's when it hits me... 1.6911 0.02511 942 470 293 179
16 I work with 10 other people, but I feel like I’m the only one who is hands on… 1.6898 0.01770 1931 976 578 377
17 I’m sick of everyone always taking shots at me. 1.6859 0.02780 745 368 243 134
18 I'm accused of always being defensive. 1.6839 0.01749 1895 943 608 344
19 The loudest boos are coming from my mother. Let’s start there. 1.6777 0.01690 2172 1136 600 436
20 Doc, I can’t seem to think outside the box. 1.6718 0.02099 1234 604 431 199
21 I just know that when they look at me they're asking, "Is he really a keeper?" 1.6692 0.01749 1877 952 594 331
22 I don't know...sometimes I just feel like I get in the way of other people's goals. 1.6677 0.01866 1607 805 531 271
23 I can't keep letting things get past me 1.6650 0.01827 1633 810 560 263
24 I feel like things are coming at me from all directions. 1.6618 0.02372 961 477 332 152
25 I'm fine living a life without goals. 1.6603 0.01688 1928 968 647 313
26 Of course I'm going to block it out. 1.6557 0.02437 938 478 305 155
27 I feel like my whole life has been spent keeping people from realizing their goals. 1.6537 0.01804 1776 927 537 312
28 I feel like I'm always in the way. 1.6530 0.01773 1755 894 576 285
29 I feel like like I keep people from achieving their goals. 1.6526 0.02197 1206 633 359 214
30 It's just that every time I've let my guard down in the past, someone's taken advantage! 1.6468 0.01721 1812 919 614 279
31 So, my goal should be to try and prevent others from achieving theirs? 1.6433 0.01790 1724 893 553 278
32 Am I just too goal-oriented? 1.6374 0.01829 1583 810 537 236
33 Even my mom said I wasn’t a keeper. 1.6372 0.02650 791 415 248 128
34 I don’t know Doc, it just feels like everything’s coming right at me. 1.6325 0.01896 1445 738 500 207
35 The session is over, doc. Didn't you hear the buzzer? 1.6297 0.02043 1639 976 294 369
36 I still can't pronounce Qatar. 1.6261 0.01988 1471 805 411 255
37 Actually I was hoping you could teach me a few defense mechanisms. 1.6252 0.01952 1414 745 454 215
38 I feel conflicted when others achieve their goals. 1.6210 0.02085 1211 635 400 176
39 I know he always goes left. But he knows that I know. 1.6176 0.02054 1263 670 406 187
40 Wow, nothing gets by you, does it? 1.6153 0.02025 1323 711 410 202
41 No, you were right. Next time in your office. 1.6147 0.02084 1238 663 389 186
42 At work I just feel like I’m in everybody’s way 1.6138 0.02395 914 484 299 131
43 What about MY goals? 1.6109 0.02103 1285 712 361 212
44 And that’s the problem, keeping people out is kind of my thing. 1.6082 0.03184 513 273 168 72
45 I can’t help feeling guilty that my goal is to keep others from achieving their goals. 1.6052 0.02255 1041 562 328 151
46 I told her I was a keeper. 1.6047 0.03254 516 283 154 79
47 I’m tired of being an obstructionist. 1.6039 0.02180 1078 574 357 147
48 I have a compulsion to stop others from achieving their goals. 1.6018 0.02250 1140 646 302 192
49 I don’t have personal goals—except to thwart the aspirations of others. Does that make me a bad person?” 1.6009 0.02218 1075 584 336 155
50 Some goals are just out of my reach. 1.5876 0.02381 982 559 269 154
51 I struggle to think inside the box. 1.5864 0.02447 885 493 265 127
52 Would you mind not writing your notes on yellow cards? 1.5831 0.02439 921 524 257 140
53 That's the point. I don't HAVE any goals. 1.5827 0.02464 925 533 245 147
54 Then just as the ball is about to hit me, I wake up. 1.5806 0.02494 825 457 257 111
55 I feel so defensive all the time. 1.5803 0.02488 865 489 250 126
56 Leave my soccer mom out of this.” 1.5785 0.02583 956 591 177 188
57 I stop people from achieving their goals. It's depressing. 1.5770 0.02569 792 445 237 110
58 Are you are going to charge me in overtime, too?” 1.5762 0.02847 623 345 197 81
59 I just feel like everyone is always taking shots at me. 1.5750 0.02518 833 472 243 118
60 I feel defenseless. 1.5734 0.03333 436 238 146 52
61 I'm always standing in the way of other people's goals. 1.5725 0.02430 903 516 257 130
62 I'm tired of feeling like everyone can just put one past me. 1.5713 0.02485 828 465 253 110
63 I make it difficult to let people in 1.5668 0.02685 704 397 215 92
64 Sometimes I just feel like I'm in the way. 1.5641 0.02604 757 431 225 101
65 Are our 90 minutes about up? 1.5639 0.02734 720 419 196 105
66 I wish I didn't feel so defensive all the time. 1.5637 0.02485 816 461 250 105
67 I keep dreaming the same thing; I'm naked except for my gloves. 1.5634 0.02830 655 377 187 91
68 The only cup I can visualize is the one I wish I’d worn last game. 1.5617 0.03052 689 438 115 136
69 I feel very vulnerable, particularly on the left side. 1.5617 0.02634 673 369 230 74
70 You’re right. I’ve got to stop worrying about other people’s goals, and focus on my own. 1.5609 0.02549 747 417 241 89
71 How can I set goals, when I'm supposed to prevent them? 1.5590 0.02853 610 345 189 76
72 It seems like things keep passing me by. 1.5579 0.02665 699 396 216 87
73 Why is it always about my soccer mom?” 1.5579 0.03003 717 460 114 143
74 I feel like they’re always trying to even the score 1.5569 0.04363 246 136 83 27
75 I just feel like I'm constantly getting in the way of other people achieving their goals. 1.5565 0.02656 726 418 212 96
76 I feel like everyone tries to avoid me 1.5560 0.03070 536 307 160 69
77 ‘Sometimes I wonder if all I’m really blocking are my feelings?’ 1.5552 0.02779 643 366 197 80
78 I feel like I'm always getting in the way of other people's goals. 1.5541 0.02793 675 395 186 94
79 I feel like their success is wholly dependent on my failure, it's just so toxic. 1.5532 0.02740 761 463 175 123
80 I always feel defensive! 1.5507 0.02849 612 351 185 76
81 Maybe I'm too goal-oriented? 1.5499 0.02718 671 385 203 83
82 I don't know Doc, I just think I'd be happier without having any goals at all 1.5492 0.03030 579 343 154 82
83 They hate me because I get to use my hands. 1.5469 0.02730 651 372 202 77
84 So how long have you felt that everyone is trying to get something past you? 1.5465 0.02966 613 367 157 89
85 I know it’s a bit egomaniacal, but my goal is to prevent others from achieving their goals. 1.5448 0.02822 659 391 177 91
86 I’m told that I’m defensive. 1.5412 0.02791 643 376 186 81
87 I swear, it just feels like everything goes over my head. 1.5399 0.02897 602 354 171 77
88 Of course I am feeling defensive... 1.5399 0.03036 602 369 141 92
89 It feels like people have been taking shots at me my whole life. 1.5397 0.03052 567 340 148 79
90 Is it wrong to keep other people from reaching their goals? 1.5392 0.02869 599 349 177 73
91 It just seems like everyone is trying to get one over on me. 1.5392 0.03006 536 310 163 63
92 I believe everyone's always trying to get something by me. 1.5352 0.02959 583 347 160 76
93 Is standing between other people and their goals really what I want my life to be all about? 1.5350 0.03087 585 362 133 90
94 Just once, I’d like to hear "SAAAAAVE!" 1.5346 0.03161 563 350 125 88
95 I feel like people are always looking past me. 1.5344 0.03052 494 282 160 52
96 So you’re saying instead of preventing goals I need to set some of my own? 1.5344 0.04434 247 144 74 29
97 Why does everyone expect me to save the day when somebody else screws up? 1.5342 0.03085 526 311 149 66
98 Your next patient is making me feel very anxious. 1.5339 0.03019 560 334 153 73
99 I’ve have a recurring dream that the whole country is depending on me. 1.5339 0.03146 502 296 144 62
100 At this point, I need to focus on saving myself. 1.5325 0.03142 492 288 146 58
101 No one seems to care about my goals. 1.5303 0.02971 545 319 163 63
102 Right when I was born, my father said "He's a keeper". 1.5290 0.03180 552 345 122 85
103 I get what you’re saying, but being defensive is part of my job. 1.5268 0.03105 522 313 143 66
104 I feel like everyone's taking shots at me. 1.5267 0.02978 581 352 152 77
105 I feel that people are always taking shots at me. 1.5250 0.03140 501 299 141 61
106 I don't get to score... I'm dressed differently.... I'm the only one wearing gloves...WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME? 1.5249 0.03357 461 281 118 62
107 My goal in life is to prevent others from reaching their goals. 1.5248 0.03208 505 308 129 68
108 Why do I feel so defensive? 1.5246 0.03001 509 295 161 53
109 I’m just so tired of saving everyone and everything. . 1.5239 0.03320 460 278 123 59
110 You do understand if he scores it’s my mother's fault? 1.5236 0.03330 466 284 120 62
111 My goal is to have no goals. 1.5214 0.02928 562 334 163 65
112 It’s always “GOOOOAAAAL!” and never “SAM!!!” 1.5212 0.03501 424 260 107 57
113 So all of a sudden I find myself thinking, who am I to stand in his way? 1.5206 0.03329 461 281 120 60
114 I feel like I'm expected to block out everything that comes at me 1.5189 0.03262 449 267 131 51
115 Do I really to spend my life blocking other people from reaching their goals? 1.5186 0.03250 457 273 131 53
116 You don't realize how difficult it is to be goal-oriented for someone in my position. 1.5186 0.03340 484 303 111 70
117 I just want to be valued for more than my net worth. 1.5185 0.03195 513 317 126 70
118 That’s when I realized I wasn’t really saving anything. I was keeping someone else from achieving their goals. 1.5182 0.03393 467 292 108 67
119 Somehow, I always feel like an easy target! 1.5171 0.03270 439 260 131 48
120 First of all, thanks for seeing me on such short notice. 1.5157 0.03302 479 297 117 65
121 It’s a goal, certainly, but is it the goal? 1.5134 0.03381 411 245 121 45
122 Doc, sometimes I feel like all other people do is blame me for standing in the way of achieving their goals. 1.5131 0.03537 421 263 100 58
123 But am I just deflecting? 1.5124 0.03233 443 263 133 47
124 I don’t know. I just always feel someone is trying to put something past me. 1.5109 0.03403 458 288 106 64
125 I feel like I don't have any goals. 1.5071 0.03317 422 253 124 45
126 I'd like to be more goal oriented. 1.5068 0.03344 440 270 117 53
127 I constantly feel the need to be defensive. 1.5065 0.03433 385 229 117 39
128 It’s like, what about MY goals? 1.5045 0.03424 442 278 105 59
129 No one understands me, at least not in America. 1.5045 0.03352 444 275 114 55
130 Everyone but me achieves their goals. 1.5039 0.03615 389 243 96 50
131 Why am I the victim of a penalty kick when I didn't commit the foul? That seems to be my life. 1.5024 0.03384 422 259 114 49
132 I feel like I’m always in other people’s way. 1.5022 0.03216 458 279 128 51
133 You're adding an extra 17 minutes, right? 1.5012 0.03494 407 253 104 50
134 Tell me more about your goals. 1.4976 0.03364 414 253 116 45
135 We're stuck in this rut - he attacks and I get defensive. 1.4976 0.03492 410 257 102 51
136 I’m always defensive. 1.4972 0.03737 354 221 90 43
137 I always feel like a target. 1.4964 0.03219 421 251 131 39
138 When do I get to pursue my own goals? 1.4964 0.03456 413 258 105 50
139 Yes, but what about my goals? 1.4962 0.03457 399 246 108 45
140 I try to set goals, then everyone tells me not to. 1.4957 0.03397 351 204 120 27
141 Am I too defensive ? 1.4952 0.03167 414 243 137 34
142 I think I may be a bit too goal oriented. 1.4950 0.03679 400 260 82 58
143 I mean, what about my goals? 1.4947 0.03694 378 241 87 50
144 You say it's a fear of flying objects. 1.4942 0.03682 344 211 96 37
145 And that's when it hit me. 1.4931 0.03445 361 215 114 32
146 I feel like I’m always being targeted. 1.4923 0.03452 388 238 109 41
147 Please don't talk about goals right now. 1.4918 0.03305 427 263 118 46
148 I feel like I get in the way of people’s goals. 1.4908 0.03691 381 245 85 51
149 I feel like I'm preventing others from achieving their goals. 1.4904 0.03491 418 267 97 54
150 I feel like I get in the way of other people achieving their goals. 1.4900 0.03544 402 256 95 51
151 She was a soccer mom . . . 1.4884 0.03592 387 246 93 48
152 I guess my fear is that the moment I let my guard down something terrible will happen. 1.4881 0.03629 379 241 91 47
153 And in this nightmare, everyone keeps calling it ‘football.’ 1.4868 0.03525 380 237 101 42
154 I lie awake at night, debating how to pronounce Qatar. 1.4866 0.03560 372 232 99 41
155 I feel people are always trying to get something by me. 1.4853 0.03599 375 237 94 44
156 Shouldn't I get psyched for the game before it starts? 1.4852 0.03823 371 245 72 54
157 My problem is that I’m always focused on other people’s goals. 1.4849 0.03733 365 235 83 47
158 These sessions would probably be more helpful if they’re weren’t once every four years. 1.4847 0.03842 359 235 74 50
159 I don’t understand why people keep taking shots at me? 1.4836 0.03505 397 252 98 47
160 I can't stop thinking about sudden death. 1.4831 0.03363 356 211 118 27
161 I’m sorry if I sound defensive. 1.4819 0.03503 386 243 100 43
162 I feel like half the world wants me to fail. 1.4819 0.03522 386 244 98 44
163 That's my problem, Doc; I don't have any goals. 1.4810 0.03735 343 217 87 39
164 My mother says it’s time for me to leave the net. 1.4809 0.04188 314 210 57 47
165 Lets discuss your relationship with your parents next half 1.4799 0.03650 348 218 93 37
166 I have goals too, you know. 1.4781 0.03602 366 232 93 41
167 All my life it's been, "You're so defensive!" 1.4781 0.03642 343 214 94 35
168 But when you think about it, Doc, is any kick truly ‘free’? 1.4771 0.03695 327 203 92 32
169 I want to focus on my own goals for a change. 1.4769 0.03862 325 208 79 38
170 I just feel like I’m always getting in the way of other people’s goals.” 1.4755 0.03856 347 228 73 46
171 And to think my mother told me I needed a goal! 1.4720 0.03736 322 202 88 32
172 I'm celebrated for having very few goals in life. 1.4714 0.03962 297 189 76 32
173 Everyone takes shots at me. 1.4710 0.04077 310 205 64 41
174 What's my goal in life? 1.4708 0.03775 308 192 87 29
175 It's not repression, Doc. I try to block everything. 1.4706 0.03803 340 221 78 41
176 I’m having difficulty focusing at work these days. It just feels like everything is coming at me so fast. 1.4702 0.03741 302 186 90 26
177 Sometimes I want to be saved 1.4697 0.03619 330 205 95 30
178 I see sudden death. 1.4695 0.03557 328 201 100 27
179 And that's when I suddenly realized, I've been blocking and deflecting my whole life. 1.4681 0.03874 329 215 74 40
180 I know I should save it. But do I need to save it? 1.4674 0.04118 276 177 69 30
181 I think we should take a time out to discuss my goals. 1.4673 0.03677 306 188 93 25
182 I spend all my energy trying not to let anything in,and when I finally do,I feel terrible. 1.4665 0.03866 343 228 70 45
183 Defensive? Why would you say that? 1.4662 0.04187 281 184 63 34
184 Goals? Can't we talk about something else?" 1.4651 0.04061 301 198 66 37
185 I feel as if every little thing I do puts him on the offensive. 1.4643 0.04074 280 180 70 30
186 I don't think you're on my side. 1.4610 0.05375 141 87 43 11
187 I’ve been so focused on other people’s goals that I lost sight of my own. 1.4601 0.03910 263 162 81 20
188 Someone is always trying to get something past me. 1.4595 0.03939 296 191 74 31
189 I’m overwhelmed by guilt—I only achieve my goals by blocking the goals of others. 1.4574 0.04019 282 182 71 29
190 It’s just this constant feeling I’m in the way. 1.4563 0.04001 320 216 62 42
191 How many times do I need to explain offsides to you? 1.4539 0.04224 293 200 53 40
192 My goals in life keep slipping through my fingers! 1.4502 0.04113 251 160 69 22
193 I try to stop others from achieving their goals. What's wrong with me, doc? 1.4500 0.04192 260 170 63 27
194 Let's talk about goals, shall we? " 1.4472 0.03701 322 209 82 31
195 You don't know how hard it is to have balls in your face constantly. 1.4464 0.04341 280 194 47 39
196 She told me I was like a wall and nothing gets through. So, here I am. 1.4464 0.03873 280 179 77 24
197 I can't stop deflecting. 1.4453 0.03938 256 161 76 19
198 But who's going to save ME? 1.4444 0.04576 225 150 50 25
199 I guess I’m just tired of always blocking things out. 1.4427 0.04022 262 169 70 23
200 Yes, I'm feeling defensive. 1.4421 0.03950 285 187 70 28
201 I feel like everyone keeps taking shots at me 1.4415 0.03692 265 163 87 15
202 For once, I just want to focus on my own goals. 1.4415 0.04025 265 172 69 24
203 They told me I couldn't make soccer more boring, well I guess I proved them wrong! 1.4413 0.04534 247 170 45 32
204 I admit, I do feel alone and just a bit defensive. 1.4406 0.03908 286 187 72 27
205 Who’s saving me? 1.4393 0.04063 280 187 63 30
206 Doc. I just can’t handle the pressure anymore. Is it “soccer” or is it “football?” 1.4392 0.03984 255 163 72 20
207 I mean, really - who am I to block someone from achieving their goals? 1.4388 0.03988 278 183 68 27
208 The problem is when they go low, I go high. 1.4388 0.04639 237 164 42 31
209 But really, what IS the goal? 1.4386 0.04265 228 147 62 19
210 Thank you for seeing me on such short notice. 1.4382 0.04183 251 165 62 24
211 My right or his right? 1.4381 0.04426 226 149 55 22
212 I guess I’m just tired of being a part of someone else’s goals. 1.4380 0.04160 274 185 58 31
213 ... and then I realized that in the pursuit of denying the goals of others, I actually don't have any of my own. 1.4370 0.04258 254 170 57 27
214 I can’t shake the feeling that I’m always in the way. 1.4365 0.04170 252 166 62 24
215 I don't mean to sound paranoid, but it seems like people are always attacking me. 1.4362 0.04119 243 157 66 20
216 I have to know whether the ball wants to be blocked. 1.4359 0.04052 234 148 70 16
217 I can never let down my guard. 1.4340 0.04084 235 150 68 17
218 I don't know, doc. I just can't seem to save anything. 1.4325 0.03973 252 162 71 19
219 I’ve realized I have a tendency to block things out. 1.4321 0.04278 243 162 57 24
220 I do think I can be overly defensive. 1.4321 0.04116 243 158 65 20
221 I know I'm blocking, but that's my job. 1.4316 0.03685 285 182 83 20
222 Forget the stuff about my mother. I just need my ankle taped. 1.4314 0.04385 255 176 48 31
223 I'm always on the defensive. 1.4291 0.03746 296 194 77 25
224 And is this “world cup” in the room with us now? 1.4286 0.04351 231 154 55 22
225 I mean, Dr., what if soccer isn't life? 1.4269 0.04076 253 167 64 22
226 And why am I wearing a baseball hat? 1.4265 0.04694 211 144 44 23
227 I know, doctor, I know. I've been blocking my entire life. 1.4261 0.04230 230 151 60 19
228 It would just be nice to have some goals of my own for once. 1.4255 0.04337 235 158 54 23
229 So as I was saying doctor, I have an illogical fear of soccer balls, I never knew why. And then it hit me... 1.4248 0.04505 226 154 48 24
230 I mean, after all is said and done, what is the goal? 1.4240 0.04029 250 164 66 20
231 The problem is I'm not blocking things. 1.4239 0.04390 243 167 49 27
232 Just once, I’d like to hear “GOOOOALIE!” 1.4236 0.04878 203 141 38 24
233 Yes, mother did wear fishnets. 1.4222 0.04339 225 150 55 20
234 Perhaps I've been too goal-oriented. 1.4215 0.04458 223 151 50 22
235 I feel like I’m constantly deflecting. 1.4208 0.04202 221 144 61 16
236 Have you ever considered that blocking the ball may be your way of avoiding intimacy? 1.4195 0.04024 267 180 62 25
237 I feel like I’m interfering with other people’s goals. 1.4181 0.04198 232 154 59 19
238 I feel like everyone is trying to avoid me. 1.4177 0.04547 237 167 41 29
239 I never fit in with the guys. I’m the only one with a long sleeved shirt, the only one with gloves, and the only one who can use hands. 1.4167 0.04338 228 154 53 21
240 I feel worthless when others achieve their goals. 1.4163 0.04416 209 139 53 17
241 I just feel like I'm getting in the way of my goals. 1.4162 0.04433 197 129 54 14
242 'It just feels like he's always keeping score.' 1.4156 0.04297 231 156 54 21
243 In the dream, he's always a perfect 10.” 1.4155 0.05038 219 162 23 34
244 I feel like all I do is get in the way of others’ goals. 1.4154 0.04694 195 132 45 18
245 I just need to pick a direction. 1.4151 0.04162 212 137 62 13
246 Is he still standing there? 1.4141 0.04526 227 158 44 25
247 I just get the feeling he's trying to get something past me, you know? 1.4135 0.04259 237 161 54 22
248 I just feel like I'm always in the way of something 1.4133 0.04562 196 131 49 16
249 I'm trying to be less defensive. 1.4130 0.04082 230 151 63 16
250 It seems like moving the goalposts is not what I should be doing here. 1.4126 0.04615 206 141 45 20
251 Everyone thinks I’m too defensive. 1.4115 0.04224 226 151 57 18
252 I always feel like I’m in the way. 1.4112 0.04600 197 133 47 17
253 Oh YEAH?" You won't be bored in about two seconds! 1.4103 0.04703 234 170 32 32
254 My real goal is to learn how to play the cello. 1.4100 0.04659 200 137 44 19
255 My one goal in life is to have no goal. 1.4098 0.03875 244 159 70 15
256 My job is blocking other’s goals, were’s the reward in that?” 1.4098 0.04417 205 137 52 16
257 It's all about the goal, never about the journey. 1.4089 0.04373 225 154 50 21
258 Maybe I am being defensive 1.4085 0.04451 213 145 49 19
259 Why do I have this feeling that people are always trying to put something past me? 1.4067 0.04248 209 138 57 14
260 Please don't ask me about goals. 1.4058 0.04219 207 136 58 13
261 I feel like they're always trying to sneak something past me. 1.4058 0.04383 207 139 52 16
262 Sometimes I wonder if I'm too goal-oriented. 1.4054 0.04223 222 149 56 17
263 It's supposed to be post-game analysis! 1.4050 0.04654 200 138 43 19
264 I just don't want to stand in the way of other people's goals 1.4048 0.04442 210 143 49 18
265 Just tell me, Doc! Is it football? Is it soccer? Is it football? Is it soccer? Is it football? It's football isn't it? 1.4034 0.04388 233 163 46 24
266 Do I go right or do I go left? 1.4031 0.04493 196 132 49 15
267 Ironically, I’m the one who feels blocked. 1.4025 0.03987 241 161 63 17
268 Either way, I’m gonna disappoint a lot of people. 1.4022 0.04696 184 125 44 15
269 I just feel like,sometimes I want to be the one saved. 1.4012 0.04784 172 116 43 13
270 Even though this is the World Cup, my father still says I am not playing real football. 1.4011 0.04703 187 128 43 16
271 What do you mean - your next appointment is here? 1.4010 0.04789 192 134 39 19
272 I only have one goal in life. 1.4010 0.04484 207 142 47 18
273 I’m just trying to understand which goals are worth pursuing. 1.4009 0.04481 217 151 45 21
274 But we need my defense mechanisms to win. 1.4000 0.04822 170 115 42 13
275 Nobody cares about my goals. 1.4000 0.04564 195 133 46 16
276 What do you mean I’m being defensive? 1.4000 0.04612 185 125 46 14
277 I just feel like everybody is trying to put something past me. 1.4000 0.04297 205 137 54 14
278 It’s like, where’s the red card for emotional injuries, you know? 1.4000 0.04675 185 126 44 15
279 I don't know Doc Some days I feel that I can't even save myself 1.3990 0.04712 193 134 41 18
280 I always thought it was good to have goals. 1.3989 0.04743 188 130 41 17
281 The problem is, I really don't like preventing people from reaching their goals. 1.3989 0.04861 188 132 37 19
282 Nothing gets by you Doc. 1.3989 0.04669 178 120 45 13
283 I just want to grab life by the balls. 1.3981 0.04620 211 149 40 22
284 I feel a sense of dislocation and resentment when I'm constantly told I need to be more goal-oriented. 1.3980 0.04659 196 136 42 18
285 I feel like I'm being unjustly targeted. 1.3971 0.04632 204 143 41 20
286 Hey Doc, you mind sitting a little more to the right? 1.3970 0.04662 199 139 41 19
287 Henri realized he was going to need use the “Freudian Slip” to make it past this goalie. 1.3969 0.04860 194 138 35 21
288 Use your head, use your head! Do you know how many times I’ve heard that? 1.3967 0.04561 184 124 47 13
289 I guess I just always feel like I’m in the way. 1.3966 0.04352 232 163 46 23
290 I feel like I'm always under attack. 1.3965 0.04149 227 154 56 17
291 My past? You mean the four goals I've already given up? 1.3957 0.05218 187 138 24 25
292 I feel I'm always in the wrong place at the wrong time. 1.3956 0.04391 182 120 52 10
293 Every goal is my fault! 1.3941 0.04814 170 116 41 13
294 I just feel like I'm in the way. 1.3939 0.04620 198 138 42 18
295 It's like they see right through me. 1.3939 0.04565 198 137 44 17
296 What kind of mother gives her son a red card? 1.3936 0.04913 188 134 34 20
297 No one's ever interested in my goals. 1.3936 0.04490 188 127 48 13
298 I think I'm in the wrong field. 1.3929 0.04926 168 116 38 14
299 I feel like I have trouble letting people in 1.3929 0.04539 196 135 45 16
300 Do you think I’m too defensive? 1.3927 0.04185 191 125 57 9
301 I just feel so defensive lately 1.3920 0.04627 176 119 45 12
302 Why doesn't anyone want to talk about MY goals? 1.3920 0.04546 199 138 44 17
303 I want to stop stopping things. 1.3915 0.04834 189 134 36 19
304 My goals in life? Why, none. 1.3913 0.04593 161 106 47 8
305 I feel like I'm in everyone's way. 1.3911 0.04641 179 122 44 13
306 I feel like I'm the only one being penalized. 1.3909 0.04404 197 134 49 14
307 I find it hard to think outside the box. 1.3906 0.04603 192 133 43 16
308 I'm feeling extremely defensive right now. 1.3905 0.04830 169 116 40 13
309 I have a fear of deciding which way to go. 1.3900 0.04637 200 141 40 19
310 I've always had trouble letting people in. 1.3898 0.04676 177 121 43 13
311 This is a safe space, right? 1.3895 0.04840 172 119 39 14
312 I wish I had a goal in life. 1.3889 0.04620 180 123 44 13
313 Just ignore him,he's my brother and I'm not his keeper. 1.3889 0.04328 198 134 51 13
314 It's like the rest of my life. Every time I go left, I should've gone right. 1.3883 0.04537 206 145 42 19
315 Why do I always feel like I'm being attacked? 1.3871 0.04271 217 150 50 17
316 I feel like I've become a target. 1.3869 0.04462 168 111 49 8
317 She told me that I wasn't a keeper, can you believe that? 1.3855 0.04884 166 115 38 13
318 Goals? I don't have any goals. I thought that was the point. 1.3854 0.04714 192 136 38 18
319 Can we return to my baseball fantasy? 1.3842 0.04418 203 141 46 16
320 Why am I always penalized when it's not my fault? 1.3842 0.04569 190 132 43 15
321 I have boundary issues. 1.3838 0.04591 185 128 43 14
322 I just don't know which direction to go 1.3834 0.04518 193 134 44 15
323 This makes no sense! Perhaps you can tell me why I’m wearing a baseball cap in a soccer cartoon? 1.3833 0.05000 180 130 31 19
324 Goals are important in life ... but they're not everything, right? 1.3833 0.04406 180 121 49 10
325 Why am I always so defensive? 1.3832 0.03990 214 143 60 11
326 I think it's a savior complex. 1.3824 0.04400 204 142 46 16
327 I was always conflicted about blocking other peoples goals 1.3824 0.04725 170 117 41 12
328 Why should I get penalized for other people's lapses in judgement? 1.3822 0.04488 191 132 45 14
329 Dr., I feel that I am not goal oriented 1.3817 0.04696 186 131 39 16
330 I don't know, doc, it sure doesn't feel like a safety net. 1.3815 0.04667 173 119 42 12
331 Why am I not using my head? 1.3807 0.04540 176 120 45 11
332 I never had goals. 1.3800 0.06159 100 69 24 7
333 No, Doc, the last thing I need in my life is more goals!" 1.3799 0.04625 179 124 42 13
334 Yeah, doc, I still can’t shake the feeling that everyone wishes I were just out of the way. 1.3799 0.04488 179 122 46 11
335 So, it's not a savior complex, it's a save complex? 1.3791 0.04226 182 121 53 8
336 I’ve been told I am too defensive. 1.3791 0.04437 182 124 47 11
337 I get off when people fail to achieve their goals. Is that wrong? 1.3789 0.04741 190 136 36 18
338 But how can I trust he's a straight shooter? 1.3789 0.04822 161 111 39 11
339 Father wouldn't talk with me about soccer- only fútbol. 1.3787 0.04885 169 119 36 14
340 I've always had trouble with goals. 1.3784 0.04453 185 127 46 12
341 Just feel like everyone is constantly taking shots at me. 1.3780 0.04838 164 114 38 12
342 Is it wrong if your goal in life is to prevent those of others? 1.3777 0.04835 188 136 33 19
343 In my recurrent dream I arrive late at therapy, after they've already scored. 1.3774 0.04433 159 105 48 6
344 So,tell me,what are your goals in life? 1.3772 0.04851 167 117 37 13
345 My biggest problem? I deflect. 1.3767 0.05247 146 103 31 12
346 I can't let anything go. 1.3763 0.04301 186 126 50 10
347 But in the end, it all seems so pointless… 1.3763 0.04811 186 134 34 18
348 I was awarded Most Vulnerable Player. 1.3763 0.04550 194 137 41 16
349 I mean, what if I'm just not goal-oriented? 1.3758 0.04578 165 112 44 9
350 I feel like everyone is always taking shots at me. 1.3757 0.04730 173 121 39 13
351 I just feel as though I’m constantly being targeted. 1.3757 0.04308 181 122 50 9
352 Let down my defenses...allow people in...there's so much behavior to unlearn. 1.3757 0.04695 189 135 37 17
353 But does anyone ever ask about MY goals? 1.3750 0.05044 168 121 31 16
354 It's like everybody's always taking shots at me. 1.3750 0.04532 176 121 44 11
355 I just seem to block everything out. 1.3750 0.04677 168 116 41 11
356 What if I make the wrong decision? 1.3742 0.04681 155 105 42 8
357 What if I’m the one that needs to be saved? 1.3731 0.04443 193 135 44 14
358 It seems like everything I do comes off as defensive. 1.3728 0.04876 169 120 35 14
359 I don't set goals, I stop them. 1.3728 0.04501 169 115 45 9
360 Soccer player. Footballer. I don't know who I am anymore. 1.3725 0.05069 153 108 33 12
361 Sometimes, I'd like to be the one who gets saved. 1.3725 0.05154 153 109 31 13
362 How can I shake this savior complex? 1.3723 0.04396 188 130 46 12
363 How does it make you feel when other people achieve their goals? 1.3723 0.04828 188 137 32 19
364 What is my GOAL in therapy?" Did you really just ask me that 1.3722 0.04859 180 130 33 17
365 Everything just seems to get past me! 1.3722 0.04318 180 122 49 9
366 And then I thought, is it their goals I'm blocking, or my own? 1.3720 0.05201 164 120 27 17
367 Talk about mind games. 1.3720 0.05129 164 119 29 16
368 That last goal really hurt my feelings 1.3714 0.04471 175 120 45 10
369 Maybe I want to be saved for once. 1.3713 0.04842 167 118 36 13
370 There were no participation trophies. I can’t move past that. 1.3711 0.04684 159 109 41 9
371 Thanks for being available on short notice. 1.3711 0.04684 159 109 41 9
372 This goal oriented therapy isn't working for me. 1.3708 0.04698 178 126 38 14
373 Because most of the time, no matter which way I dive, it IS wrong. That's why. 1.3704 0.04504 189 133 42 14
374 It just feels like they keep moving the goalposts on me. 1.3704 0.04411 216 156 40 20
375 There’s more to life than just goals, you know? 1.3704 0.04707 162 112 40 10
376 I really want to start focusing on my own goals. 1.3699 0.05052 146 102 34 10
377 I’m just tired of feeling like I need to be everyone else’s keeper. 1.3697 0.04955 165 118 33 14
378 It’s like all the shots are taken at me when we’re in public 1.3692 0.04524 195 139 40 16
379 But it doesn’t feel like a safety net. 1.3682 0.04195 201 139 50 12
380 Will you please quit asking about my goals. 1.3681 0.04487 182 127 43 12
381 So......what's your goal for today? 1.3675 0.05004 166 120 31 15
382 But, you told me last time to be more goal oriented. 1.3675 0.04625 166 115 41 10
383 But I'm SUPPOSED to be on the defensive. I'm the goalie! 1.3671 0.05107 158 114 30 14
384 I can’t help thinking, what about MY goals? 1.3669 0.04867 169 121 34 14
385 I'm constantly told that I'm getting in the way of other peoples goals in life" 1.3661 0.04729 183 132 35 16
386 I didn't expect the mushrooms to last this long. 1.3655 0.05344 145 105 27 13
387 I want to let things in more. 1.3642 0.04926 151 106 35 10
388 I've always wanted to play the flute. 1.3642 0.04852 173 125 33 15
389 I'm not deflecting 1.3631 0.04795 157 110 37 10
390 I think its time I made my own goals. 1.3625 0.05282 160 119 24 17
391 Why am I always the responsible one? 1.3625 0.04563 160 110 42 8
392 I guess I've always been defensive. 1.3624 0.04782 149 103 38 8
393 I'm conflicted. I really just want us to all be winners! 1.3620 0.04672 163 114 39 10
394 So what you’re telling me is that his left is actually my right? 1.3620 0.04909 163 117 33 13
395 Thanks for meeting me at work, Doc. 1.3618 0.05074 152 109 31 12
396 I wish I had goals of my own. 1.3614 0.04614 166 116 40 10
397 The goal of analysis? I didn't think you meant it literally. 1.3613 0.05004 155 111 32 12
398 Of course he’ll score. 1.3611 0.04510 180 127 41 12
399 It's like they're always keeping score, you know?" 1.3611 0.04578 180 128 39 13
400 I’m struggling with boundaries 1.3611 0.04510 180 127 41 12
401 It's not fair. Save a penalty kick and you're a hero for about thirty seconds. Score a goal or two and women want to have you baby. 1.3609 0.04784 169 121 35 13
402 But what are MY goals? 1.3608 0.04685 158 110 39 9
403 I feel like I keep too many people from achieving their goals. 1.3595 0.04961 153 109 33 11
404 Lately it feels like I'm being hit from all sides. 1.3593 0.04746 167 119 36 12
405 Doc, don't think remaining centered will help me this time. 1.3590 0.05060 156 113 30 13
406 I just feel like I'm always on the defensive, you know? 1.3581 0.04983 148 105 33 10
407 I appreciate you make house and field calls. 1.3580 0.04356 176 122 45 9
408 I clearly have my dreams and he has his goals. 1.3576 0.05090 151 109 30 12
409 Do you think I have a savior complex? 1.3576 0.04463 165 114 43 8
410 I’m having recurring dreams involving the number 10. 1.3576 0.04783 165 118 35 12
411 Is everyone looking at me? 1.3571 0.05508 112 78 28 6
412 My life is without goals. 1.3567 0.04590 171 121 39 11
413 I'm telling you, I've been working on my goals. 1.3567 0.04809 171 124 33 14
414 Of course I'm being defensive! 1.3567 0.05113 157 115 28 14
415 Thanks for meeting me here – I'm trying to be more goal-oriented. 1.3566 0.05382 143 105 25 13
416 Do you offer 90 minutes sessions? 1.3562 0.04635 146 100 40 6
417 What’s my goal in life? Why do you ask? 1.3562 0.04532 146 99 42 5
418 My own goals? Please don’t ask. 1.3557 0.05135 149 108 29 12
419 Well, yes, of course I'm blocking. 1.3556 0.05201 135 96 30 9
420 I'm just glad to finally find an in-net-work providor. 1.3554 0.04682 166 118 37 11
421 They make me wear a different coloured team shirt and then wonder why I don’t feel like I belong anywhere. 1.3554 0.04682 166 118 37 11
422 I feel like I'm preventing my colleagues from achieving their goals. 1.3550 0.04847 169 123 32 14
423 Can you give me a sec? I need to block this shot. 1.3546 0.05339 141 103 26 12
424 I take it we're now in extra-time? 1.3546 0.05046 141 100 32 9
425 I can't help being defensive. 1.3542 0.04774 144 100 37 7
426 I feel guilty about using my hands. 1.3540 0.04613 161 113 39 9
427 I just don't know which way to turn. 1.3537 0.04998 147 105 32 10
428 So the Americans changed the name to ‘soccer,’ and then they called the pitch the ‘field,’ and then their boots became ‘shoes,’ and then I just lost it. 1.3536 0.04680 181 132 34 15
429 So then he says, ‘You’re deflecting’. 1.3536 0.04680 181 132 34 15
430 I worry that I'm preventing others from achieving their goals 1.3533 0.05106 150 109 29 12
431 I just feel I'm constantly being attacked 1.3529 0.04676 170 122 36 12
432 Please explain to me again why I am here. 1.3522 0.04816 159 114 34 11
433 They're constantly taking shots at me! 1.3522 0.04816 159 114 34 11
434 And then, Coach asks me if I have any goals?!!! 1.3514 0.04585 148 102 40 6
435 OK, I see, the opposing player kicking the ball at me is not actually my emasculating mother. 1.3512 0.04712 168 121 35 12
436 At this point of my life, I’m afraid to let anyone or anything in. 1.3507 0.05109 134 95 31 8
437 I have this recurring dream that I’m lying down during a penalty kick. 1.3506 0.04834 154 110 34 10
438 Why do I have to stop it? He starts it every time! 1.3498 0.04137 203 144 47 12
439 I have no goals of my own. 1.3487 0.04598 152 106 39 7
440 A breakthrough is just what I DON'T need! 1.3487 0.04874 152 109 33 10
441 I am getting better, I am not naked in front of 65,000 people. 1.3486 0.04786 175 129 31 15
442 I just block everything out 1.3475 0.05131 141 102 29 10
443 I feel like I am always standing in the way of others achieving their goals. 1.3471 0.04665 170 123 35 12
444 I must have blocked that out. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
445 Sometimes I just feel like I'm always in the way. 1.3466 0.04481 176 126 39 11
446 Sometimes I feel like taking the ball, and going home. 1.3462 0.05537 130 96 23 11
447 Why am I wearing a hat? 1.3462 0.05429 130 95 25 10
448 I feel like an obstacle that keeps others from succeeding. 1.3462 0.04714 182 135 31 16
449 It's hard to remember it's about the process when everyone is yelling 'Goal!' all the time. 1.3459 0.04720 159 114 35 10
450 But, I'm not supposed to have any goals. 1.3451 0.04901 142 101 33 8
451 ''Thank you for coming to my place for this session" 1.3444 0.04796 151 108 34 9
452 i think that it's the perfect time to admit that you are a keeper* 1.3433 0.05201 134 97 28 9
453 Doc...I couldn't figure out why the soccer ball kept getting bigger and bigger,and then it hit me 1.3427 0.04850 178 134 27 17
454 I'm not achieving goals but preventing them. 1.3427 0.05167 143 105 27 11
455 More and more, I feel like I'm always on the defensive. 1.3421 0.04677 152 108 36 8
456 It's MY goals I want to focus on. 1.3418 0.04899 158 116 30 12
457 We’re out of time. We’ll have to finish in penalty therapy. 1.3413 0.05539 126 93 23 10
458 I just feel like people expect more of me because I can use my hands. 1.3411 0.05771 129 98 18 13
459 But I don’t want to be the ball…. 1.3409 0.05571 132 99 21 12
460 It's not that I don't have any goals, I simply don't want any goals. 1.3406 0.05393 138 103 23 12
461 Egooooooooo 1.3406 0.04878 138 98 33 7
462 What’s your goal here? 1.3403 0.05041 144 105 29 10
463 I want to have no goals in life. 1.3400 0.04808 150 108 33 9
464 I just feel like people are always attacking me. 1.3399 0.05008 153 113 28 12
465 I feel like I'm being watched 1.3390 0.05412 118 85 26 7
466 My whole life I’ve felt like people have been taking shots at me 1.3389 0.04537 180 132 35 13
467 Let's talk about goals 1.3386 0.05027 127 90 31 6
468 Sometimes, I don’t know my own net worth. 1.3386 0.05387 127 93 25 9
469 I can't help feeling everyone wants to take shots at me. 1.3381 0.04956 139 100 31 8
470 It’s just that they really resent me for being able to use my hands. 1.3380 0.05278 142 106 24 12
471 I worry that everyone except me has goals 1.3380 0.05085 142 104 28 10
472 I know I'm blocking a lot from you but that's what I do best. 1.3379 0.04817 145 104 33 8
473 I feel so alone. They're all out there running around having a grand time, and they only need me when they don't want something. 1.3377 0.05468 154 120 16 18
474 You know Doc, sometimes I can't help but wonder about my cup size. 1.3377 0.05621 154 122 12 20
475 I feel constantly attacked. 1.3371 0.04428 178 129 38 11
476 I feel like I’m trapped in a box. 1.3360 0.05073 125 89 30 6
477 I didn’t think your fee would include penalties. 1.3360 0.04944 125 88 32 5
478 I feel as if I am always being penalized. 1.3359 0.05116 128 92 29 7
479 Everyone says I'm a keeper, but they keep taking shots at me... 1.3359 0.05376 131 97 24 10
480 I've started blocking other people's goals off the field. 1.3358 0.05209 137 101 26 10
481 75% of the time it’s like I’m not even here. 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
482 Then my mom starts handing out orange wedges and we all get World Cup trophies…. 1.3357 0.04926 140 101 31 8
483 I don't know what my problem is, doctor, but I'm afraid it's catching. 1.3357 0.04713 140 99 35 6
484 I'm either reaching too high or too low - I just can't seem to satisfy anyone! 1.3357 0.05055 143 105 28 10
485 I can't stay for the whole 50 minutes today. 1.3356 0.04887 146 106 31 9
486 I’m just tired of everyone taking shots at me. 1.3356 0.04627 149 106 36 7
487 I dunno, am I over-analyzing it? 1.3356 0.04913 149 109 30 10
488 Just once, I’d like someone to save me. 1.3354 0.05048 158 119 25 14
489 But, blocking is my strength. 1.3333 0.05047 147 109 27 11
490 So many balls... 1.3333 0.05526 114 83 24 7
491 I honestly wasn't ready for this kind of pressure. I only started playing for kicks. 1.3333 0.04907 153 113 29 11
492 I just feel like I am always on the defensive with him. 1.3333 0.05120 132 96 28 8
493 I’ve been feeling isolated and distanced from my coworkers. 1.3333 0.04583 135 94 37 4
494 So you’re saying I’ve got to use my head? 1.3333 0.04968 138 100 30 8
495 Thanks for helping me play these mind games. 1.3333 0.05164 126 91 28 7
496 He just refuses to respect my personal boundaries! 1.3333 0.04663 147 105 35 7
497 My problem is that I'm fixed on other people's goals. 1.3313 0.04442 163 117 38 8
498 I’m trying not to be so goal oriented. 1.3312 0.04729 157 115 32 10
499 I feel guilty about being able to use my hands. 1.3312 0.04612 154 111 35 8
500 Everyone I know says all I do is get in the way. 1.3310 0.04596 145 103 36 6
501 People often say I keep them from reaching their goals 1.3309 0.04938 139 101 30 8
502 But who tends the goal tender? 1.3309 0.04902 136 98 31 7
503 I need to develop my defense mechanisms. 1.3308 0.04618 133 93 36 4
504 I just always feel as though I’m dropping the ball. 1.3308 0.05167 130 95 27 8
505 If you want me to continue my therapy with you, you are going to have to get your own office. 1.3308 0.04931 130 93 31 6
506 I just wish I had some goals of my own 1.3307 0.04880 127 90 32 5
507 Sure, but I couldn't even save my marriage. 1.3306 0.05337 124 91 25 8
508 Of course I’m defensive! 1.3289 0.04920 152 113 28 11
509 I'm incapable of helping others achieve their goals. 1.3288 0.05061 146 109 26 11
510 It all feels so pointless 1.3287 0.05135 143 107 25 11
511 When you get it worked out,let us know so we can continue the damn game! 1.3286 0.05012 140 103 28 9
512 Regardless of what I do, people are constantly yelling at me to stop it. 1.3285 0.05192 137 102 25 10
513 I honestly never see it coming 1.3282 0.05358 131 98 23 10
514 It just feels like a personal attack. 1.3281 0.05216 128 94 26 8
515 But why doesn’t anyone ever try to save ME? 1.3281 0.05096 128 93 28 7
516 I'm tired of everyone else setting my boundaries 1.3280 0.04922 125 89 31 5
517 Perhaps the TV network's in-depth match analysis has gone too far 1.3277 0.05483 119 88 23 8
518 Why can’t I do the Panenka? 1.3265 0.05123 147 111 24 12
519 What's the goal here? 1.3264 0.04811 144 105 31 8
520 Call it paranoia if you want, but absolutely everyone takes shots at me! 1.3264 0.04605 144 103 35 6
521 I'm stuck in this box with all the responsibility, but they're out running around having fun. It's not fair. 1.3264 0.04911 144 106 29 9
522 Mom always said I'd be a keeper. 1.3259 0.04913 135 98 30 7
523 Why does everybody seem to attack me? 1.3259 0.04913 135 98 30 7
524 I don't know, doc. I feel like all I do is just block whatever comes at me. 1.3259 0.04563 135 95 36 4
525 It sort of gets to you after a while… always stopping people from achieving their goals. 1.3259 0.04682 135 96 34 5
526 So you're saying that sometimes a yellow card is just a yellow card? 1.3258 0.05213 132 98 25 9
527 They never yell "SAAAAAVVVVVVEEEEEE!" 1.3256 0.05410 129 97 22 10
528 I'm having trouble with head shots 1.3256 0.04942 129 93 30 6
529 So what you’re saying doc is I’m blocking my goals? 1.3254 0.04562 169 125 33 11
530 Who needs goals when your net worth is amazing? 1.3245 0.04750 151 111 31 9
531 You keep saying I'm blocking as if you didn't know that it's my job. 1.3237 0.04703 139 100 33 6
532 I mean, they call it a free kick but I'm the one paying for it." 1.3235 0.05206 136 102 24 10
533 I just don't know what my goal is anymore. 1.3235 0.05101 136 101 26 9
534 Isn't life enough of a penalty?? 1.3233 0.04719 133 95 33 5
535 He says I keep moving the goal posts , but I don’t! They’re clearly fixed!!!!! 1.3233 0.05395 133 101 21 11
536 What is my goal? 1.3231 0.04787 130 93 32 5
537 I wish I could let him achieve his goal, while at the same time achieving mine... 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
538 I'm just not goal oriented. 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
539 SHOULD MY OWN SELF WORTH BE BASED ON OTHERS LACK of SUCCESS? 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
540 Can we skip to the part where you tell me it was a Freudian slip and not my fault? 1.3228 0.05348 127 95 23 9
541 The word "goaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal" upsets me. 1.3226 0.05191 124 91 26 7
542 All this extra time and still no results. 1.3223 0.05145 121 88 27 6
543 I think I'd prefer a post-game analysis. 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
544 What if this is my goal in life? 1.3220 0.05630 118 89 20 9
545 It feels like I can't stop shutting people out. 1.3217 0.05319 115 84 25 6
546 I often find myself being defensive. 1.3217 0.04821 143 105 30 8
547 I heard you were the best in the field. 1.3217 0.05119 143 108 24 11
548 I mean, who am I to get in the way of someone's goal? 1.3217 0.04922 143 106 28 9
549 I guess that's why I feel joy when others don't achieve their goals. 1.3214 0.04994 140 104 27 9
550 I’d really hate to stand between a man and his goals. 1.3214 0.04675 140 101 33 6
551 I just feel I am trapped in a web and everyone is looking at me. 1.3211 0.05664 109 81 21 7
552 I’m hearing voices Doc, lots of them. 1.3211 0.05812 109 82 19 8
553 Then she said it's OK to use your hands, you're a goalie, but I couldn't do it. 1.3206 0.04757 131 94 32 5
554 Run that Savior Complex by me again. 1.3206 0.05114 131 97 26 8
555 I mean... I can't put anything behind me, you know? 1.3206 0.04998 131 96 28 7
556 If one of my teammates commits a foul, why do I need to suffer the consequences? 1.3203 0.04826 128 92 31 5
557 I have trouble blocking my emotions...and other stuff. 1.3203 0.04964 153 116 25 12
558 Funny thing. My next patient has just the opposite issue. 1.3200 0.05400 125 94 22 9
559 I am just not defensive by nature. 1.3197 0.05240 122 90 25 7
560 Wait a minute. Are goals good? 1.3193 0.05460 119 89 22 8
561 It makes me anxious others are so goal oriented. 1.3191 0.04861 141 104 29 8
562 Do you feel like an obstacle, an inconvenience, like you're standing in the way of others' goals? 1.3191 0.04648 141 102 33 6
563 And then no one believed I was actually hurt. 1.3190 0.05691 116 88 19 9
564 I seem to get in the way of reaching my own goals, too. 1.3188 0.04931 138 102 28 8
565 I think we just have different goals. 1.3182 0.04603 132 94 34 4
566 Do you think 'the ball' you're always talking about could just be your own trauma? 1.3182 0.04848 132 96 30 6
567 Thanks for seeing me on short notice. 1.3178 0.05610 129 100 17 12
568 Maybe I need to focus on my own goals, instead of obstructing the goals of others. 1.3175 0.05595 126 97 18 11
569 I'm feeling really targeted right now. 1.3175 0.05595 126 97 18 11
570 Of course if he misses you'll be meeting with him next week. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
571 He looks like he’ll go one way but then always goes the other. This is why I have trust issues. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
572 I’ve really been working on being less guarded. 1.3172 0.04864 145 108 28 9
573 I've really had it at work. People just keep kicking things my way. 1.3165 0.05109 139 105 24 10
574 I don't think right now is a good time for me to be vulnerable 1.3162 0.05381 117 87 23 7
575 I'm just not the savior everyone thinks I am. 1.3162 0.05242 117 86 25 6
576 I’m now realizing you literally meant IN-NET-WORK. 1.3162 0.05242 117 86 25 6
577 I feel like I’m blocking something. 1.3162 0.05100 117 85 27 5
578 Is the session over? I don’t think so, let’s add another, oh say, 4 minutes. 1.3162 0.05081 136 102 25 9
579 I just don't know how to stop this. 1.3162 0.04749 136 99 31 6
580 I have trust issues. I keep getting this awful feeling that everyone's trying to slip one by me. 1.3158 0.04574 133 95 34 4
581 I think my problems stem from a lack of goals at work. 1.3154 0.04576 149 109 33 7
582 Everyone calls me ‘Keeper,’ but I’ve got so much to give.” 1.3154 0.04864 149 112 27 10
583 But it's my job to be defensive 1.3154 0.05354 130 99 21 10
584 Yes but why am I always being put in a position to have to say no? 1.3154 0.05241 130 98 23 9
585 I just don't know why it's such a 'penalty' to spend time with me one-on-one. 1.3150 0.04569 127 90 34 3
586 I think I’m too goal-oriented. 1.3147 0.04699 143 105 31 7
587 Sometimes a ball is just a ball. 1.3147 0.04699 143 105 31 7
588 Thank God you had an opening, Doc. 1.3145 0.05168 124 92 25 7
589 I just feel so defensive all the time... 1.3145 0.05039 124 91 27 6
590 I don’t have any goals. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
591 I really didn't expect it to play out this way. 1.3139 0.04832 137 101 29 7
592 All we ever talk about are goals. 1.3139 0.05555 137 108 15 14
593 My parents were too goal-oriented. 1.3139 0.05258 137 105 21 11
594 I just want to use my hands sometimes 1.3139 0.04720 137 100 31 6
595 He'll wait. I like to make everyone wait. 1.3134 0.04903 134 99 28 7
596 I'm really unhappy with my goals. 1.3125 0.05053 128 95 26 7
597 I feel like I’m always getting in the way. 1.3125 0.04917 112 80 29 3
598 When this World Cup is over can we get back to my mother again? 1.3125 0.05053 128 95 26 7
599 Every time I let my guard down I get hurt. 1.3125 0.04537 160 119 32 9
600 It’s my job, but it’s not easy when everyone is always taking shots at me. 1.3120 0.05378 125 95 21 9
601 Just once I would like to chase my own goals. 1.3120 0.05257 125 94 23 8
602 What does it say about me that I can’t seem to let anyone accomplish their goals? 1.3120 0.05005 125 92 27 6
603 This is taking sports psychology to a whole new level. 1.3120 0.05133 125 93 25 7
604 I can't save every one. 1.3119 0.05164 109 79 26 4
605 I feel all this pressure to defend myself 1.3117 0.04920 154 118 24 12
606 Sometimes I feel like all eyes are on me. 1.3116 0.04577 138 100 33 5
607 I guess you’re right, my defense mechanisms really aren’t working that well 1.3116 0.04802 138 102 29 7
608 I feel like the whole world is judging me. 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
609 I just want to block everything out. 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
610 Let's start from the beginning of the game. 1.3111 0.04872 135 100 28 7
611 I feel that everybody is trying to get one over on me. 1.3109 0.05566 119 91 19 9
612 For once, I want someone to say "he's a keeper" and not be referring to my job, y'know? 1.3103 0.04961 116 84 28 4
613 It was my Mother who wanted me to be a goalkeeper. 1.3103 0.04644 145 107 31 7
614 Sometimes I think people are watching me. 1.3101 0.04772 129 94 30 5
615 I wouldn’t say I have a persecution complex, but I do have to ask: Who is being penalized here? 1.3095 0.05341 126 96 21 9
616 They never pass to me. 1.3095 0.04709 126 91 31 4
617 I tend to overthink the game. 1.3095 0.05221 126 95 23 8
618 Uh-oh! There he is. I guess our time is up! 1.3094 0.04773 139 103 29 7
619 Well, I just got so good at blocking things out that I thought I would make it my career. 1.3094 0.04773 139 103 29 7
620 I have commitment issues. 1.3091 0.05441 110 82 22 6
621 I feel so alone. 1.3091 0.04959 110 79 28 3
622 I should give him a shot 1.3089 0.05307 123 93 22 8
623 So what you're saying, Mario, is that you feel dirty when five different men score on you, correct? Now bring it full circle to your mother's time working as a pole dancer and the goal tending error that brought you into this world. 1.3088 0.05061 136 103 24 9
624 My defense mechanisms are strong, but I have never had a personal goal. 1.3084 0.05541 107 80 21 6
625 Isn't life just one big penalty shot? 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
626 I'm just tired of having to save it every time, you know? Why doesn't someone else save it for once? 1.3082 0.04718 146 109 29 8
627 I dunno...sometimes I just feel like some of mine are just out of reach. 1.3077 0.05355 117 88 22 7
628 And the truth is, I want them to hit me. 1.3065 0.05144 124 93 24 7
629 when I told them I like grabbing balls, this isn’t what I meant 1.3065 0.05513 124 96 18 10
630 I just want someone to save me 1.3061 0.05311 98 71 24 3
631 And that’s how I realized I needed to make my own personal goals 1.3060 0.04764 134 99 29 6
632 Their goals were always important—but mine, never. 1.3060 0.05106 134 102 23 9
633 I don’t want to be the reason people cannot achieve their goals. 1.3060 0.04881 134 100 27 7
634 And then there was the feeling, you know, that everything is just a game… 1.3058 0.05095 121 90 25 6
635 I feel like my success is only based on other people's failures. 1.3056 0.04856 144 109 26 9
636 Sometimes I feel like the World is waiting for me to fail. 1.3056 0.05172 108 79 25 4
637 If I make a "save," though, what am I really saving? 1.3047 0.04778 128 94 29 5
638 Maybe I’m the one who needs to be saved, you know? 1.3047 0.04648 128 93 31 4
639 So you dreamt your arms grew so long you could cover the entire goal. Go on ... 1.3043 0.05119 115 85 25 5
640 My goal's in life are to hinder others'. 1.3040 0.04980 125 93 26 6
641 I'm sorry. Your hours up. 1.3040 0.04714 125 91 30 4
642 I have an ego. He has a super ego. 1.3039 0.05536 102 76 21 5
643 I want him, like me, to be lacking a goal in life. 1.3033 0.05059 122 91 25 6
644 Does coach know you want me to be less defensive? 1.3030 0.04921 132 99 26 7
645 If you let that goal in we’ll call it a Freudian Slip 1.3030 0.05151 132 101 22 9
646 Well you see doc, in my line of work, procrastination can be a problem. 1.3028 0.05756 109 84 17 8
647 I will not reveal your weaknesses. I maintain strict doctor-patient confidentiality 1.3023 0.04747 129 95 29 5
648 I feel like I always have to be defensive. 1.3019 0.05046 106 77 26 3
649 Must I feel guilty if I keep my fellow man from pursuing his goals? 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
650 I never thought of myself as goal-oriented, but I'm open to it. 1.3016 0.04403 126 90 34 2
651 Why don’t we have shadows, too? 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
652 I had the penalty kick nightmare again where I'm completely unprepared, and everyone is watching. 1.3009 0.05316 113 85 22 6
653 When he moves, drop the pencil & go right; I'll go left! 1.3008 0.05529 123 96 17 10
654 I know, I know. Sometimes a ball is just a ball! 1.3008 0.04462 123 88 33 2
655 I feel like things in my life are flying right past me. 1.3000 0.04822 120 88 28 4
656 It’s like we’re all playing some poorly-understood game that no one I know actually cares about! 1.3000 0.05081 130 99 23 8
657 I feel protective. 1.3000 0.05711 110 85 17 8
658 My goal has always been not to have too many goals. 1.3000 0.04963 130 98 25 7
659 . . .of course he could think that I’m going to go right and shoot left. However, I might just be thinking that because of the lack of affection shown by my father which manifests in lack of trust for others. . . 1.3000 0.04800 150 115 25 10
660 Sometimes, doc, I want to go left, but life takes me right. 1.3000 0.04716 130 96 29 5
661 There”s no need for a goal 1.3000 0.05254 110 82 23 5
662 I just don’t understand why I’m always getting shot at. 1.3000 0.05093 110 81 25 4
663 So, tell me about your New Year's goals." 1.2992 0.05161 127 97 22 8
664 And then she said, "I like you, but you're not keeper material." 1.2992 0.04913 127 95 26 6
665 Blocking, you know all about that, right, Doc? 1.2991 0.05188 117 88 23 6
666 No, I wouldn’t say I have a savior complex. 1.2991 0.05188 117 88 23 6
667 To be honest with you, I think I've been overly defensive recently. 1.2991 0.05044 117 87 25 5
668 When it comes to the penalty, I always think of my mother. 1.2991 0.05188 117 88 23 6
669 I do feel like I'm blocking something. 1.2991 0.05180 107 79 24 4
670 What would Ted Lasso do? 1.2991 0.05667 107 82 18 7
671 Just short-term goals, Doctor. 1.2991 0.05510 107 81 20 6
672 Am I a bad person for thwarting people’s goals? 1.2985 0.04498 134 98 32 4
673 I don't have any goals in my life. 1.2984 0.05119 124 94 23 7
674 Everything I say is confidential, right? 1.2984 0.04856 124 92 27 5
675 I'm sorry, but I'm not letting anything get past me today. 1.2984 0.04856 124 92 27 5
676 Is this really the only appointment time you had in December? 1.2984 0.05369 124 96 19 9
677 I just wish I knew where this was going. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
678 So if I know he's shooting right, and he knows that I know he's shooting right ... that means he's shooting left, right 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
679 Thanks for agreeing to meet at my office doctor... 1.2975 0.04642 121 88 30 3
680 I don't understand why everyone keeps taking shots at me. 1.2975 0.04788 121 89 28 4
681 I'm saying sometimes 'pelvic injury' isn't a euphemism for 'kicked in the nuts.' " 1.2975 0.05068 121 91 24 6
682 I think it started when I entered and no one was wearing the same uniform as me. 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
683 You know, I just feel like I’m on the defensive, like all of the time 1.2971 0.04413 138 101 33 4
684 These goal oriented people are driving me crazy. 1.2970 0.05179 101 74 24 3
685 No, that's the problem, I can't 'dive deeper' 1.2969 0.04880 128 96 26 6
686 And then I wake up screaming 'Goooaaalll!!!!' 1.2966 0.05685 118 93 15 10
687 Why the hat? A careless illustrator, mixing up ball-sports I guess. 1.2960 0.05208 125 96 21 8
688 You want to talk about goals?! We all have goals. 1.2959 0.05272 98 72 23 3
689 My goal in life? Why do you ask? 1.2957 0.05520 115 89 18 8
690 ... and then they blow a whistle, and like a circus animal, I'm expected to perform. And there it is now. 1.2957 0.05380 115 88 20 7
691 For me, denial works every time. 1.2957 0.05089 115 86 24 5
692 They only come to me when they need something saved, and I'm like "hello! I have needs too!" 1.2952 0.05400 105 79 21 5
693 There are just so many goals that I haven’t been able to reach 1.2951 0.05421 122 95 18 9
694 I feel like life is coming at me too fast. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
695 I fear all the important things will slip through my grasp. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
696 Yeah, maybe it is time for me to set a new goal. 1.2946 0.05016 112 83 25 4
697 I suppose you think this is just another defense mechanism of mine. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
698 And these goals…are they in the room with us now? 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
699 The worst part is that the goalie never scores. 1.2946 0.04319 129 93 34 2
700 But when do I get to focus on MY goals? 1.2941 0.05384 119 92 19 8
701 Although they say I'm a keeper, it sometimes feels temporary. 1.2937 0.05048 126 96 23 7
702 I'm trying not to take the attacks personally 1.2937 0.05048 126 96 23 7
703 It’s nice to meet in my office for once 1.2936 0.05263 109 82 22 5
704 So I asked myself, if the ball really wants to go into the net, who am I to get in the way? 1.2929 0.05607 99 75 19 5
705 Number 10 sent you to mess with my head, didn't he? 1.2929 0.05788 99 76 17 6
706 Everyone expects me to always make the save, but who is there to save me? 1.2929 0.06134 99 78 13 8
707 This is the only way I can visualize my goals. 1.2929 0.05964 99 77 15 7
708 I've always been goal-oriented. 1.2925 0.05186 106 79 23 4
709 Analysis paralysis. 1.2925 0.05838 106 83 15 8
710 I just feel like time is running out. 1.2923 0.04561 130 96 30 4
711 Focus on your journey, not the goal 1.2920 0.04978 113 84 25 4
712 I feel like no one respects my boundaries. 1.2920 0.04650 113 82 29 2
713 I honestly thought it was the journey, not the goal. 1.2920 0.04766 137 104 26 7
714 Doc, you try being the reason why others fail to achieve their goals. 1.2917 0.05076 120 91 23 6
715 I know it's just a penalty shot but why do I feel like I'm being penalized? 1.2917 0.04792 120 89 27 4
716 Somehow, I keep thinking outside the box. 1.2913 0.05257 127 99 19 9
717 Seriously, Doc – you’re asking me about goals? 1.2913 0.04758 127 95 27 5
718 I just feel like things are constantly coming at me. 1.2913 0.04887 127 96 25 6
719 In a sport designed for feet, I play head games. 1.2913 0.05278 103 77 22 4
720 I find it hard to believe in long-term goals. 1.2913 0.04706 103 74 28 1
721 I feel really awkward about doing this here. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
722 And then they yell "GOOOOOOOAL" - Just once I'd like to hear them yell - "SAAAAAAAVED" 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
723 Everyone tells me I'm being too defensive. 1.2908 0.04884 141 109 23 9
724 I didn’t cause the penalty, yet I feel enormous anxiety over the penalty kick. Why? 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
725 Doc, the irony is not lost on me. I am the most goal oriented person you will ever meet “ 1.2906 0.05300 117 90 20 7
726 The game starts in 5 minutes. How much progress can we make by then? 1.2903 0.06226 93 73 13 7
727 So all I need to do is imagine myself blocking his shot and we win? 1.2903 0.05092 124 95 22 7
728 ok so run me through the offside rule one more time I think I’m starting to get it 1.2901 0.04905 131 100 24 7
729 Doc, you keep telling me I'm blocking, but that's my job. 1.2900 0.04984 100 73 25 2
730 I struggle every day to have no goal in my life. 1.2897 0.05313 107 81 21 5
731 But if the soccer ball is my mother, why can't I save her? 1.2895 0.05096 114 86 23 5
732 Am I inconsiderate to oppose the goals of others? 1.2895 0.05246 114 87 21 6
733 He’s a perfect 10, but we have different goals. 1.2895 0.05246 114 87 21 6
734 All day, every day, I'm reminded of Annette. How am I supposed to get over her when I'm a surrounded by reminder? 1.2895 0.05096 114 86 23 5
735 I just feel like the ball's in his court really." 1.2895 0.05246 114 87 21 6
736 Still messy, isn't it? 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
737 I spent my whole life thwarting the goals of others. 1.2885 0.05409 104 79 20 5
738 I feel like half the world is against me. 1.2885 0.05053 104 77 24 3
739 I feel like people are always trying to sneak something past me. 1.2881 0.04830 118 88 26 4
740 Manchester and I no longer feel united. 1.2880 0.04795 125 94 26 5
741 I've lost sight of my goals. 1.2872 0.05583 94 71 19 4
742 All I do is try to block everything 1.2872 0.05978 94 73 15 6
743 So then I said give me one example of how I’m not goal-oriented enough for you 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
744 It used to be a kick, but now I just want it to be over. 1.2871 0.05328 101 76 21 4
745 Sometimes I wonder "who is here to save ME?" 1.2871 0.05511 101 77 19 5
746 No one cares about a goalie’s goals.” 1.2870 0.05104 108 81 23 4
747 I mean, is it necessary for everyone to have to yell “GOOOOOAAAAALLLL” each time at the top of their lungs? 1.2870 0.05432 108 83 19 6
748 The truth is, Doctor, I’m just not goal oriented. 1.2870 0.05742 108 85 15 8
749 It just feels like there’s always something getting in the way of my goals. 1.2870 0.04904 115 86 25 4
750 Doc, do you think I'm too goal-oriented? 1.2870 0.05057 115 87 23 5
751 Thanks for the assist, but I can save myself. 1.2857 0.04826 105 77 26 2
752 I'm mostly worried about what I'll find on the net 1.2857 0.05268 126 99 18 9
753 You still feel like you're constantly under attack at work? 1.2857 0.05365 105 80 20 5
754 it's only a game. 1.2857 0.05871 112 90 12 10
755 Am I being too defensive? 1.2857 0.05802 98 76 16 6
756 I feel targeted… 1.2857 0.04941 119 90 24 5
757 Deep down I'm afraid people just want me out of their way. 1.2857 0.04762 126 95 26 5
758 I think I might have a saver complex. 1.2857 0.05981 98 77 14 7
759 I don’t have goals - I block them out of habit. 1.2857 0.05230 98 73 22 3
760 I think, that it all depends on how you define "goal". 1.2857 0.05802 98 76 16 6
761 I just feel like everything is coming at me at once … 1.2857 0.04982 112 84 24 4
762 I just can’t get past this feeling that everyone is trying to get something past me. 1.2846 0.05376 130 104 15 11
763 Does this mean 50 or 60 minutes of time will be added to the game? 1.2845 0.04382 116 84 31 1
764 People tell me I'm obsessed with blocking their goals. 1.2843 0.05283 102 77 21 4
765 The other day my dad said, "Keep your eye on the ball." Now just what is that supposed to mean? 1.2843 0.05464 102 78 19 5
766 So is blocking a healthy or unhealthy defense mechanism? 1.2843 0.05283 102 77 21 4
767 No one understands the pressure I’m under 1.2843 0.05639 102 79 17 6
768 It just feels like I´m always on the defensive 1.2842 0.05923 95 74 15 6
769 As a child, I dreamt about larger balls. 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
770 Lean back, if he shoots right we’ll have a chance. 1.2835 0.04860 127 97 24 6
771 No, it’s definitely not work related 1.2833 0.05183 120 93 20 7
772 Everyone yells at me not to have goals. 1.2830 0.05648 106 83 16 7
773 I can't accomplish any of my goals 1.2828 0.05750 99 77 16 6
774 I have this feeling everybody on the team hates me. Am I paranoid, Doctor? 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
775 It's like he doesn't even want me here 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
776 It seems like everyone's trying to put something past me. 1.2823 0.05065 124 96 21 7
777 I don't know doc... I keep dropping the ball. My mother says it's the net result of not being goal oriented. 1.2821 0.04517 117 86 29 2
778 I thought it was time to save myself. 1.2821 0.04677 117 87 27 3
779 So “The Dutch”, are they in the room with us right now? 1.2818 0.05346 110 85 19 6
780 I understand your point about letting things go, Doc, but this is a goal I need to keep. 1.2818 0.05024 110 83 23 4
781 So you’re saying that I put myself in disadvantageous scenarios? 1.2816 0.05418 103 79 19 5
782 My goal is no goals. 1.2816 0.05590 103 80 17 6
783 So, what you're saying is, I should try to be more goal oriented. 1.2816 0.05239 103 78 21 4
784 Sometimes I wonder, can anything truly be saved? 1.2812 0.05066 96 71 23 2
785 And then I realized I'm being watched in a cage. 1.2812 0.05482 96 73 19 4
786 I find myself constantly sabotaging my own goals!” 1.2812 0.05075 128 100 20 8
787 ...but here's the kicker. 1.2812 0.05278 96 72 21 3
788 Everyone just gets so defensive around me 1.2807 0.05214 114 88 20 6
789 We have different goals now. 1.2800 0.04628 125 94 27 4
790 The only thing to fear is sphere itself. 1.2800 0.05874 100 79 14 7
791 I always feel like i'm being attacked 1.2797 0.05090 118 91 21 6
792 I know I'm being defensive but ... 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
793 They say they're not aiming for me...but I just don't believe it. 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
794 It's a moments like these when I feel an immense amount of pressure. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
795 I just feel like I’m always standing in the way of people’s goals. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
796 Soccer. Football. I’m so confused. 1.2787 0.04694 122 92 26 4
797 You said to take you to the place where I block things 1.2784 0.05815 97 76 15 6
798 I have this dream: It's the World Cup final, tie game, ninth minute of stoppage time, and I have to defend a penalty kick by Lionel Messi. 1.2784 0.05231 97 73 21 3
799 Ideally I'd like to focus on my goals for a change. 1.2784 0.05231 97 73 21 3
800 So why do you say I am so defensive? 1.2783 0.05024 115 88 22 5
801 It's always about everyone else's goals. What about my goals? 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
802 I just find yellow cards very triggering. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
803 I'm confused. Is it pronounced like 'catarrh?' Or is it like 'cutter?' It's all so overwhelming. 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
804 I’ve just been struggling to enforce boundaries lately. 1.2778 0.04312 126 93 31 2
805 I just can't seem to think outside the box. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
806 I can't stop dreaming about balls. 1.2778 0.06005 108 88 10 10
807 The ball is always coming to me and yet going away. There is nothing outside the box. 1.2772 0.05288 101 77 20 4
808 Goals? No goals Doc you know that ! 1.2766 0.05741 94 73 16 5
809 Just once, I wish they would blame someone else. 1.2762 0.05496 105 82 17 6
810 it always feels like I’M the one who’s being penalized 1.2762 0.05152 105 80 21 4
811 So you believe people are always taking shots at you ? 1.2755 0.05385 98 75 19 4
812 And now I’m really stressed about my insurance bill. 1.2755 0.05577 98 76 17 5
813 I don't feel like I have any long-range goals in life. 1.2752 0.05027 109 83 22 4
814 My father never passed me the ball. 1.2752 0.05354 109 85 18 6
815 So then I started wondering, what if I study the humanities? 1.2750 0.05418 120 96 15 9
816 I feel like people are always attacking me. 1.2748 0.04730 131 101 24 6
817 Sure, I can put myself out there, but I just can't let anything in. 1.2747 0.06066 91 72 13 6
818 I know I'm blocking something. But what? 1.2747 0.05198 91 68 21 2
819 I’m just afraid I’ll never reach my goal 1.2747 0.05649 91 70 17 4
820 To many goals are out of my reach. 1.2745 0.05601 102 80 16 6
821 But, what about my goals? What am I aiming for? 1.2743 0.05067 113 87 21 5
822 Why do you feel you are stopping those around you from achieving their goals? 1.2743 0.05067 113 87 21 5
823 Over and Over and Over One Nil One Nil One Nil! 1.2738 0.05449 84 63 19 2
824 Either way, I'm screwed! 1.2738 0.06189 84 66 13 5
825 Where's MY penalty kick? 1.2737 0.05279 95 72 20 3
826 I think just removing the net is the best solution. 1.2736 0.04746 106 79 25 2
827 Thanks for helping me reach my goooooooooooooals. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
828 I see other people achieving their goals. 1.2727 0.04699 132 102 24 6
829 So what is the goal anyway? 1.2727 0.05337 99 76 19 4
830 But I’m still not happy after reaching my goal. 1.2727 0.05140 99 75 21 3
831 Of course I'm depressed! He never misses! 1.2727 0.05535 88 67 18 3
832 All these guys should get their own goals. 1.2727 0.04457 110 81 28 1
833 I needed a goal in life, not a life in goal. 1.2727 0.05616 110 88 14 8
834 I'm not sure the metaverse is the best place for my therapy session. 1.2727 0.04936 99 74 23 2
835 What sort of goals? 1.2719 0.05180 114 89 19 6
836 Everybody's shooting at me. 1.2719 0.04871 114 87 23 4
837 Yeah, it *does* remind me of my playpen. 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
838 Whenever I think about my life goals, I can only express them in sports analogies. 1.2718 0.04616 103 76 26 1
839 The problem is I am terrible at setting goals. 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
840 You see how my missed free kick haunts me even now? 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
841 No matter what I do, they’ll say it is my fault 1.2717 0.05804 92 72 15 5
842 But, really, am I just saving myself? 1.2717 0.05595 92 71 17 4
843 I know this sounds crazy, but I just feel a lot of pressure with my job! 1.2710 0.05405 107 84 17 6
844 Get over it. Messi scores against everybody. 1.2710 0.05240 107 83 19 5
845 I became a goal keeper but never a goal seeker. 1.2710 0.05240 107 83 19 5
846 I just starting questioning “what’s really the goal here” 1.2708 0.05017 96 72 22 2
847 I need to work on my mental block. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
848 Can We Be Quick About This? 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
849 Can you cure my dyslexia, since I always lunge right when the kick is to the left? 1.2706 0.05128 85 63 21 1
850 … and *nothing* ever just comes my way 1.2705 0.04661 122 93 25 4
851 Sometimes I feel like everyone is watching me. 1.2703 0.04779 111 84 24 3
852 Who am I to stop someone from achieving their goal? 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
853 Nobody ever asks me about my goals. 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
854 I fear that if I'm always chasing the next goal, I'll miss living in the moment. 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
855 …it‘s like, I’m stuck in my father‘s emotional net. 1.2697 0.06140 89 71 12 6
856 I feel like everyone's coming for me. 1.2696 0.04835 115 88 23 4
857 We each have conflicting goals, it's a paradox that I should just block. 1.2696 0.04835 115 88 23 4
858 You see doctor, my goal in life is no goals. Does that make sense? 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
859 I just need to stall 5 more minutes ‘til the final whistle. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
860 I’m always focusing on other’s goals and not my own. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
861 That's our time for today, I've added an additional 4 minutes due to cry stoppage 1.2689 0.05021 119 93 20 6
862 I just feel like I'm goal averse. 1.2689 0.05161 119 94 18 7
863 I think dreams are more important than goals - don't you ? 1.2688 0.05327 93 71 19 3
864 My goal is that they all aim too high. 1.2688 0.05749 93 73 15 5
865 Thanks Doc - we should really do this more than once every four years. 1.2688 0.05103 93 70 21 2
866 Yes, Freud was goal-oriented, but ... 1.2688 0.05542 93 72 17 4
867 Give up one free kick and where are my friends? 1.2685 0.05028 108 83 21 4
868 I have a problem with letting people in. 1.2685 0.05520 108 86 15 7
869 It really gets to me that nobody has my back. 1.2683 0.04908 123 96 21 6
870 If you slide the couch a little to the left and scoot your chair back I think we will have it covered 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
871 I want to stop blocking others' goals and instead focus on my own. 1.2683 0.04908 123 96 21 6
872 My teammates are always turning their backs on me. 1.2680 0.04973 97 73 22 2
873 Before we start I must confess that until now I didn’t fully appreciate the benefits of our Employee Assistance Program. 1.2680 0.04973 97 73 22 2
874 In my dreams I am being attacked from all directions. 1.2680 0.05388 97 75 18 4
875 Is it really my place to stand between people and their goals? 1.2679 0.05526 112 90 14 8
876 I could've just gotten you a ticket. 1.2673 0.05430 101 79 17 5
877 They say "it's all part of the game," but they are always aiming at me! 1.2673 0.05610 101 80 15 6
878 No, I have no career goals 1.2673 0.05430 101 79 17 5
879 I have dreams that I stop a penalty kick to win the World Cup. 1.2667 0.05653 90 70 16 4
880 And how long have you felt like things are always just hurtling towards you? 1.2667 0.05288 105 82 18 5
881 Actually, I’d prefer not to have any goals right now. 1.2667 0.05458 105 83 16 6
882 Sometimes I feel like I'm just in everyone's way. 1.2667 0.04543 120 91 26 3
883 ...and in the dream I'm having a session with you, but instead of the session taking place in your office, it's taking place on the soccer field and I'm holding up the game. 1.2660 0.05695 94 74 15 5
884 I’ve developed a fear of spheres. 1.2660 0.05490 94 73 17 4
885 I wish I could achieve just one goal. 1.2655 0.04707 113 86 24 3
886 Life just isn’t easy for me, considering that all my goals in life are more goals”. 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
887 I’m just tired of being guarded . 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
888 You believe I'm always defensive? 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
889 I can't help it. This game is sooooooo boring. 1.2653 0.05720 98 78 14 6
890 My life lacks a goal. 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
891 Football, Soccer, Football, Soccer, which is it? 1.2650 0.04605 117 89 25 3
892 I know, I know, I am in charge of my destiny, but its a big net 1.2647 0.05561 102 81 15 6
893 I am a keeper...I just wish he would realize that 1.2647 0.05561 102 81 15 6
894 Just play along - the ref doesn’t know I’m faking this existential crisis. 1.2645 0.04947 121 95 20 6
895 I feel like I’m getting in the way of other people’s goals 1.2644 0.05029 87 65 21 1
896 Do they have to rip their shirts off afterwards? I take that part a bit personally. 1.2644 0.05535 87 67 17 3
897 I feel like everyone is looking at me 1.2642 0.05244 106 83 18 5
898 Why do you feel you are not a keeper 1.2642 0.05576 106 85 14 7
899 Being the only one allowed to touch the ball with my hands still wasn't good enough for my parents. 1.2642 0.05244 106 83 18 5
900 Yes, he's in the room right now, doc. 1.2637 0.05599 91 71 16 4
901 I’ve finally moved on from stopping myself from achieving my own goals, and now stop others from achieving theirs 1.2632 0.05145 114 90 18 6
902 But Michelle says that when they go low I should go high? I'm confused. 1.2632 0.06025 95 77 11 7
903 It's Pele! My worst nightmare. 1.2632 0.05145 114 90 18 6
904 #10: " I wonder if he's complaining about me..." 1.2632 0.04671 114 87 24 3
905 You think they're kicking AT you ??? 1.2627 0.05305 118 95 15 8
906 I have this terrible anxiety about stoppage time. 1.2626 0.05094 99 76 20 3
907 I know his session should be over but I added in six minutes of stoppage time. 1.2626 0.05292 99 77 18 4
908 I know have to pick a direction and commit. But what if I get it wrong?! 1.2626 0.05483 99 78 16 5
909 You say "I never let anyone in" like it's a bad thing 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
910 I feel like our goals don't really align 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
911 I’m done defending everyone else’s goals, I wanna talk about MY goals. 1.2621 0.05682 103 83 13 7
912 Today, I'd like to talk about my goals in life. 1.2617 0.05200 107 84 18 5
913 Can we pick this up again in 4 years? 1.2617 0.05028 107 83 20 4
914 I think my problem started with dodgeball. 1.2617 0.05200 107 84 18 5
915 We all need a goal in life. 1.2617 0.05028 107 83 20 4
916 My mom forgot the juice and snacks. 1.2614 0.05713 88 69 15 4
917 You're not the only one trying to get into my head right now. 1.2613 0.04563 111 84 25 2
918 I keep pondering, do they really love me for me or is it only when I stop a goal? 1.2613 0.05232 111 88 17 6
919 I have this recurring dream of getting hit in the face with the ball. 1.2613 0.04909 111 86 21 4
920 I am very unaware of the goals of others 1.2613 0.04739 111 85 23 3
921 So, here’s the kicker. 1.2609 0.05756 92 73 14 5
922 My personal goals sometimes conflict with my professional goals. 1.2609 0.05106 115 91 18 6
923 I just can’t understand why people don’t like me. 1.2609 0.05756 92 73 14 5
924 Don’t worry about him, he’s offsides 1.2609 0.04856 92 69 22 1
925 They've given me two minutes' psychic injury time. Where do I even start? 1.2609 0.05756 92 73 14 5
926 In my dream she is round but I can’t catch her. 1.2605 0.04987 119 94 19 6
927 So he accuses me of being too guarded. 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
928 World Cope. 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
929 Thanks--So blocking something out is sometimes the right thing to do." 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
930 And in the dream the strange people are calling it football for some reason. 1.2600 0.05794 100 81 12 7
931 You asked me what my goals for therapy are 1.2600 0.05245 100 78 18 4
932 If I save it, is this just a defense mechanism? 1.2596 0.04732 104 79 23 2
933 I hate this new league rule that requires therapy instead of just a yellow card warning! 1.2596 0.05291 104 82 17 5
934 Nothing Can Stop What's Coming 1.2596 0.04531 104 78 25 1
935 I guess I've just always had a bit of a savior complex... 1.2595 0.04545 131 102 24 5
936 Game’s mostly mental anyways. 1.2593 0.05768 81 63 15 3
937 It’s just hard not to take it personally.” 1.2593 0.05205 81 61 19 1
938 Don't know doc, just feels like I'm missing the larger goal! 1.2589 0.05777 112 93 9 10
939 No one is respecting my boundaries 1.2589 0.04871 112 87 21 4
940 FIFA, Qatar... It's a lot to process. 1.2586 0.04916 116 91 20 5
941 I really wanted to be a fisherman 1.2584 0.06091 89 72 11 6
942 I always wanted to be able to achieve a goal in life. 1.2584 0.05656 89 70 15 4
943 He’s trying to psych me out. 1.2584 0.05426 89 69 17 3
944 My dreams are all Messi 1.2584 0.04933 89 67 21 1
945 I feel like people are always trying to take advantage of me. 1.2584 0.05426 89 69 17 3
946 I feel guilty when I stand in the way of people from reaching their goals. 1.2583 0.05358 120 98 13 9
947 Finally! A full 90 minute session! 1.2581 0.05275 93 72 18 3
948 I disagree - I don’t think I’m defensive by nature! 1.2581 0.05492 93 73 16 4
949 Doctor, is this soccer or football? I'm so confused!" 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
950 Yet I have two perfectly good arms. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
951 Your going to need more than that to be a better goalie 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
952 Everyone's avoiding me. 1.2574 0.05006 101 78 20 3
953 Ever since I was a kid I've wanted to hit a home run 1.2574 0.05200 101 79 18 4
954 I didn't get the penalty. Why are they shooting at me? 1.2574 0.05387 101 80 16 5
955 I'm anxious that everyone expects me to be the savior. 1.2571 0.04694 105 80 23 2
956 I feel like play therapy is not working out all that well for me. 1.2571 0.05069 105 82 19 4
957 I just don't understand networking. 1.2569 0.04402 109 82 26 1
958 It's always Save the Goal Kenny, what about my Goals Doc? 1.2569 0.04772 109 84 22 3
959 It's definitely a binary decision. 1.2561 0.05964 82 65 13 4
960 Break-ups just feel so Messi 1.2558 0.05774 86 68 14 4
961 Pursuing my own goals is killing my career. 1.2556 0.05600 90 71 15 4
962 So you're saying it's good to have no goals. 1.2556 0.04886 90 68 21 1
963 I feel like it’s all coming at me so fast. 1.2556 0.05819 90 72 13 5
964 My wife keeps telling me I’m focused on the wrong goals. 1.2553 0.05002 94 72 20 2
965 Let's discuss your goals for therapy. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
966 I feel like I am in a constant cage of emotion 1.2553 0.05002 94 72 20 2
967 I’m always so indecisive; should I lean right or should I lean left? 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
968 The unrelenting negativity of stopping others from achieving their goals is such a downer. 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
969 And then she told me she preferred American Football! 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
970 Go left? Go right? I can't even get out of bed in the morning. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
971 I always seem to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
972 I feel boxed in. 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
973 Everyone calls me a GoalKeeper, but I've always felt more like a Giver. 1.2549 0.04963 102 79 20 3
974 Boundaries, I'm good at. I'm bad with time management. 1.2547 0.04845 106 82 21 3
975 If people would stop attacking me maybe I wouldn't be so defensive. 1.2545 0.05393 110 89 14 7
976 Whenever I have sex, I am always scared of my balls going in. 1.2545 0.05546 110 90 12 8
977 I believe I’m very goal-oriented. 1.2545 0.05236 110 88 16 6
978 And it’s like, ‘what am I even saving for?’ 1.2544 0.04282 114 86 27 1
979 You’re deflecting again 1.2544 0.04795 114 89 21 4
980 I just constantly feel like I'm in the wrong place at the wrong time. 1.2542 0.04842 118 93 20 5
981 I just feel like I’m constantly on guard, you know? 1.2542 0.04690 118 92 22 4
982 There are times I feel so open and exposed without anyone to help me. 1.2540 0.04207 126 96 28 2
983 I've just never been that goal oriented. 1.2532 0.05829 79 62 14 3
984 Shootout" is a trigger word for me, doc 1.2530 0.05645 83 65 15 3
985 It’s like the whole world is watching me” 1.2530 0.05899 83 66 13 4
986 Why do I feel so blocked? 1.2530 0.05645 83 65 15 3
987 I am not paranoid. They're all against me. 1.2530 0.05378 83 64 17 2
988 The goal seems so close yet so far 1.2530 0.05378 83 64 17 2
989 I told him he’s too forward and he thinks I’m too guarded. 1.2530 0.05645 83 65 15 3
990 It just feels like every single shot is coming from my mother. 1.2530 0.05378 83 64 17 2
991 Shut up and defend! 1.2529 0.05715 87 69 14 4
992 Well, for instance right now. 1.2529 0.05944 87 70 12 5
993 Mother always discouraged me from setting too high of goals. 1.2529 0.05226 87 67 18 2
994 I can't get over the feeling that no one wants to get close to me. 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
995 Doc, am I the bad guy for stopping others from achieving their goals? 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
996 What is keeping you from your goal? 1.2527 0.04581 91 68 23 0
997 I dream, I wish, I win! 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
998 I can’t cross that line again. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
999 I just feel like these goals aren't helping my career 1.2526 0.06165 95 79 8 8
1000 You're saying this cage is erogenous? 1.2526 0.04725 95 72 22 1
1001 I just feel like everyone is aiming for me. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1002 But what I'd rather do is direct. 1.2525 0.05044 99 77 19 3
1003 They say I have a sport's complex. 1.2525 0.04618 99 75 23 1
1004 I’ve drawn my boundary lines but they keep trying trying to cross them without my permission 1.2525 0.05438 99 79 15 5
1005 9, 8, 7, 6, 5 ... 1.2524 0.05110 103 81 18 4
1006 Look, I’ve heard great things about sports psychologists, but couldn’t we do this after the game?” 1.2522 0.05502 115 95 11 9
1007 Is this really football? 1.2500 0.04944 108 85 19 4
1008 But what about MY goals? 1.2500 0.05585 84 66 15 3
1009 And why do you think the whole stadium doesn’t like you? 1.2500 0.05067 104 82 18 4
1010 But what if he knows that I know that he thinks he knows that I know which way he’s going to go? 1.2500 0.05911 92 75 11 6
1011 I feel like everyone is invading my space. 1.2500 0.05421 88 69 16 3
1012 I think it started in Little League... 1.2500 0.05837 84 67 13 4
1013 Sure, I LOOK like a goalie, but I identify as a center fielder. 1.2500 0.05585 84 66 15 3
1014 Do you ever worry you’re in the wrong field? 1.2500 0.05130 96 75 18 3
1015 Somehow, I've always felt that being defensive was a good thing. 1.2500 0.05339 96 76 16 4
1016 But I need all my defensive mechanisms. 1.2500 0.05130 96 75 18 3
1017 My problem isn't so much anxiety as procrastination 1.2500 0.05658 76 59 15 2
1018 Somebody else commits a penalty and I have to face the consequences...explain that to me please. 1.2500 0.05960 76 60 13 3
1019 … this recurring dream where I’m in the net but not really a goalie… 1.2500 0.06309 84 69 9 6
1020 Yes, but I AM a defense mechanism. 1.2500 0.05592 104 85 12 7
1021 I’m finally able to stop being so defensive 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1022 I feel like a slacker,Doc. Everyone else on the team is so goal oriented. 1.2500 0.05541 96 77 14 5
1023 I'm loving these new therapy time-outs." 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1024 Ted Lasso has completely changed the way I see myself in relation to this game. 1.2500 0.05130 96 75 18 3
1025 I have this recurring dream that I'm the ball. 1.2500 0.05492 92 73 15 4
1026 Doctor, I continue to have nightmares, is it soccer or football? 1.2500 0.05046 84 64 19 1
1027 I can't get him to stop crossing my boundaries!" 1.2500 0.05067 104 82 18 4
1028 Sometimes I want someone to catch me for a change. 1.2500 0.05339 96 76 16 4
1029 I just can’t seem to kick this feeling that I’m missing something, Doc. 1.2500 0.05175 88 68 18 2
1030 I just feel like I need to be able to let my guard down more 1.2500 0.05492 92 73 15 4
1031 I'm so torn doc, will he go high left, low right, where is it going? 1.2500 0.05322 84 65 17 2
1032 I like touching balls 1.2479 0.05278 117 96 13 8
1033 My life's goooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaallls seem out of reach. 1.2477 0.04904 109 86 19 4
1034 I can’t get over the feeling that I’m a butterfly trapped inside this huge net. 1.2477 0.04904 109 86 19 4
1035 On the other hand, if I turn a blind eye we can all go home early. 1.2477 0.04544 109 84 23 2
1036 My life is obsessively goal-oriented. 1.2477 0.04904 109 86 19 4
1037 It started when I was nine. 1.2476 0.04444 105 80 24 1
1038 If I make this next save I will be a hero in my country, but if I don’t I will be scorned forever! And how does that make you feel? 1.2476 0.05544 105 86 12 7
1039 Tell me about your goals in life. 1.2476 0.04645 105 81 22 2
1040 I always feel one step away from my goal. 1.2475 0.05152 101 80 17 4
1041 Frankly, I just feel like the game itself depends on me at times, and that's really stressful, you know? 1.2475 0.04752 101 78 21 2
1042 I mean, really, how can I NOT have a savior complex? 1.2475 0.04956 101 79 19 3
1043 And is this ‘bad referee’ on the pitch with us right now? 1.2474 0.05083 97 76 18 3
1044 I wish I were a keeper off the field. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1045 He's gonna hit me in the face again isn't he 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1046 It started when my mother kicked me out of the house. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1047 Why must they all kick me when I’m down?” 1.2471 0.05527 85 67 15 3
1048 You know, nobody tells you how lonely this job really is. When you think about it, I'm playing an entirely different game over here. 1.2471 0.05775 85 68 13 4
1049 I struggle with feeling like I want other people to fail. 1.2471 0.05775 85 68 13 4
1050 Why am I so defensive? 1.2469 0.05424 81 63 16 2
1051 It's just, like, who am I to thwart all of his goals? 1.2469 0.05424 81 63 16 2
1052 'When we're done, please usher in the priest." 1.2469 0.05701 81 64 14 3
1053 Sometimes I worry that the only obstacle to our goals is me. 1.2469 0.05131 81 62 18 1
1054 Sometimes I feel like it is DSM-5, me-0. 1.2469 0.05966 81 65 12 4
1055 Thanks for seeing me on such short notice. This will crush my parents. I want to do ballet. 1.2468 0.05594 77 60 15 2
1056 You're right, I AM blocking. 1.2468 0.05594 77 60 15 2
1057 Of course it's a defense mechanism. 1.2468 0.05280 77 59 17 1
1058 Maybe it’s time for me to start thinking about my own goals. 1.2468 0.05594 77 60 15 2
1059 “Does never being able to score make me less of a man?” 1.2466 0.05441 73 56 16 1
1060 I just don't feel exceptional here. 1.2455 0.04690 110 86 21 3
1061 So you prevent people from reaching their goals? And you feel that you do this intentionally? 1.2455 0.05354 110 90 13 7
1062 Imagine your goals. 1.2455 0.04865 110 87 19 4
1063 But I think it IS whether you win or lose! 1.2453 0.04607 106 82 22 2
1064 I'll wait. I'm Argentinean. I know. 1.2449 0.05242 98 78 16 4
1065 I just feel helpless without my hands. 1.2449 0.05242 98 78 16 4
1066 Now it's considered "work-related" and covered. So, anyway... 1.2449 0.05242 98 78 16 4
1067 Why am I the one who always has to 'save' the game? 1.2447 0.05387 94 75 15 4
1068 And then I thought, well, sometimes a ball is just a ball. 1.2447 0.04944 94 73 19 2
1069 So you are keeping people from reaching their goals? How does that make you feel? 1.2447 0.05596 94 76 13 5
1070 I was feeling catharsis after I blocked the last goal and positive emotions replaced my negative ones, but here were go again. 1.2444 0.05765 90 73 12 5
1071 Yes, I'm faking, but that's between us. 1.2444 0.05765 90 73 12 5
1072 Sometime I think I'm too goal-oriented. 1.2444 0.04822 90 69 20 1
1073 I mean, I really think I’m done thinking about goals. 1.2444 0.05074 90 70 18 2
1074 Are you saying I shouldn’t take it personally when he kicks the ball into my face as hard as he can? 1.2442 0.05470 86 68 15 3
1075 So there I was, about to block the kick - wait, did I mention everyone was naked? 1.2442 0.05470 86 68 15 3
1076 I need a goal 1.2439 0.05900 82 66 12 4
1077 I find everyone at my job offensive 1.2439 0.06150 82 67 10 5
1078 I can't help thinking we should postpone this week's session. 1.2439 0.05639 82 65 14 3
1079 How can I reach my goal? 1.2436 0.05221 78 60 17 1
1080 I want to help others achieve their goals. Is that so wrong? 1.2436 0.05531 78 61 15 2
1081 To find out the rest of the world calls it 'football' but I can use my hands, it's just a lot, you know? 1.2436 0.06370 78 64 9 5
1082 But it's such a big net to fill" 1.2432 0.04992 111 89 17 5
1083 Why am I so obsessed with wanting bigger hands? 1.2432 0.06027 74 59 12 3
1084 Doc, do these sessions include stoppage time? 1.2432 0.04992 111 89 17 5
1085 And we’re out of time 1.2430 0.04759 107 84 20 3
1086 Helpless, anxious, lack of self-confidence. It all started when we began playing Brazil an hour ago. 1.2427 0.04871 103 81 19 3
1087 It’s the negativity in the term “sudden death”… why not say “sudden self-realisation”? 1.2427 0.04672 103 80 21 2
1088 Sometimes I feel like the entire world is anticipating my next move. 1.2421 0.05337 95 76 15 4
1089 I had the soccer nightmare again. 1.2421 0.05337 95 76 15 4
1090 Everyone seems to have goals but me. 1.2421 0.05542 95 77 13 5
1091 I have ball envy. 1.2421 0.05337 95 76 15 4
1092 I’ve been keeping a lot of balls in the air at work. 1.2418 0.05708 91 74 12 5
1093 I feel like the clock has just completely stopped for me. 1.2418 0.04776 91 70 20 1
1094 In my nightmare it got much worse; they said no beer 1.2418 0.04776 91 70 20 1
1095 And then I said it's called 'football', not 'soccer.' 1.2418 0.05490 91 73 14 4
1096 A few more seconds....I think we're psyching him out. 1.2414 0.06110 87 72 9 6
1097 I need injury time, too. 1.2414 0.05161 87 68 17 2
1098 It just seems like everything is rushing at me. 1.2414 0.05414 87 69 15 3
1099 I'm sick of being kicked on! 1.2414 0.04614 87 66 21 0
1100 ...and then, just as I reach to catch the ball it bends like Beckham. 1.2411 0.04616 112 88 21 3
1101 I appreciate your working me into your busy schedule. 1.2410 0.05309 83 65 16 2
1102 But am I also blocking my personal goals? 1.2410 0.05579 83 66 14 3
1103 My girlfriend just doesn’t see me as a keeper. 1.2410 0.05309 83 65 16 2
1104 My wife keeps saying I'm aloof and defensive. 1.2410 0.05579 83 66 14 3
1105 I guess I just have trouble letting things go. 1.2410 0.05309 83 65 16 2
1106 I think I take things too literally, for instance last time you said in life we need a goal. 1.2405 0.05164 79 61 17 1
1107 Why does someone else have to fail in order for me to be happy? 1.2405 0.05164 79 61 17 1
1108 And then they said “ It’s only a game!” 1.2405 0.05469 79 62 15 2
1109 Diving, jumping, blocking. I feel like I've spent my life preparing to be in Congress. 1.2405 0.05758 79 63 13 3
1110 I just don't get a kick out of it. I'm a hands-on type. 1.2405 0.05469 79 62 15 2
1111 My goals just don't align with other people's goals. 1.2405 0.06033 79 64 11 4
1112 没什么好写的. 反正你们也看不懂. 1.2405 0.05758 79 63 13 3
1113 What worries me the most, is that you actually agreed to do this. 1.2404 0.05202 104 84 15 5
1114 I just feel like something is between me and reaching my goals 1.2404 0.04830 104 82 19 3
1115 Fake emotional injury! 1.2400 0.05955 75 60 12 3
1116 I’m at my best when I picture them naked ! 1.2400 0.06250 75 61 10 4
1117 But what's blocking me? 1.2400 0.05955 75 60 12 3
1118 I've always had a difficult time letting my guard down." myoken@umassd.ed 1.2400 0.04740 100 78 20 2
1119 I’ve dreamt of this moment for years, but I’ve always been naked. 1.2400 0.05315 75 58 16 1
1120 I don't know why the cartoonist put a hat on me. I think it has something to do with his mother. 1.2400 0.05341 100 81 14 5
1121 Sometimes a goal is just a goal. 1.2400 0.06250 75 61 10 4
1122 I really just want to focus on my own goals, to be honest. 1.2400 0.05315 75 58 16 1
1123 I think it's a matter of reassessing my goals. 1.2396 0.05287 96 77 15 4
1124 I can’t shake this awful feeling that it’s me who’s been offside all along. 1.2396 0.05287 96 77 15 4
1125 I can’t help feeling that it’s me who needs to be saved. 1.2391 0.04977 92 72 18 2
1126 I don't know Doc, I feel like the goalposts just keeping moving.... 1.2391 0.05651 92 75 12 5
1127 Like, why would I try to stop the ball anymore? 1.2391 0.05651 92 75 12 5
1128 I always seem to choose the wrong direction 1.2391 0.05436 92 74 14 4
1129 Everything seems to be whizzing by me lately. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1130 Sometimes I feel like I just get in the way of everything 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1131 But what's MY goal? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1132 I'm just so tired of feeling like everyone's depending on me. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1133 At first, I thought that he would go left, but then I thought, no, that’s just what he wants me to think…he’ll go right. But then I thought if he thinks that I think he’ll go right…he’ll probably go left. Now I think that he thinks that I think tha…. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1134 I feel like I’m blocking my son's goals. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1135 But I want to wear my baseball hat! 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
1136 I don’t know why I think it will make 50,000 people at me. You’re right - I should just ignore him. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
1137 Everyone is trying to get something by me. 1.2381 0.04972 84 65 18 1
1138 I feel like things are just passing by me 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
1139 I can't let it go! 1.2381 0.04972 84 65 18 1
1140 I have to cut our session short, I'm due back at work now." 1.2381 0.04594 105 82 21 2
1141 I’m just trying to think out of the box, you know? 1.2381 0.04594 105 82 21 2
1142 Everyone has a goal but me. 1.2376 0.04905 101 80 18 3
1143 Why wait for post game analysis? 1.2376 0.04905 101 80 18 3
1144 Is there a way to see blocking as a good thing? 1.2376 0.04905 101 80 18 3
1145 Nobody else seems to be taking a hands on approach 1.2376 0.04905 101 80 18 3
1146 I feel like I am being forced to pick a side 1.2375 0.05409 80 63 15 2
1147 Mental health comes first. I'll play the game when I'm ready. 1.2375 0.05694 80 64 13 3
1148 I feel like I'm always under fire at my job. 1.2375 0.05409 80 63 15 2
1149 I'm feeling the need for a much bigger couch. 1.2375 0.05694 80 64 13 3
1150 Why are penalty kicks always directed at me? I feel like I'm being punished for other people's mistakes. 1.2375 0.05965 80 65 11 4
1151 Well, I have no idea how "low and to the left" would make me feel. 1.2375 0.05694 80 64 13 3
1152 I'm tired of being kicked around." 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1153 Thirty-two teams and I'm the only they on the pitch? 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1154 I've been told I don't respect boundaries. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1155 I wanted to play football 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1156 I feel like people are always taking shots at me 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1157 Thanks, Doc, for making this goal call 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1158 To catch or not to catch ... How many fans of the other team do I have the right to disappoint? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1159 I’m defensive? You’re not scoring any points with me. 1.2371 0.04582 97 75 21 1
1160 Thanks for coming on short notice. 1.2368 0.05254 76 59 16 1
1161 You don't get it, doc. My goal is to prevent others from reaching their goals. 1.2368 0.05578 76 60 14 2
1162 I've been blocking things laying down, without breaking a sweat, for decades. Why should I change things now? 1.2368 0.05578 76 60 14 2
1163 I've got schadenfreude issues. If I can't achieve my goals, I don't want anyone else to, either. 1.2368 0.05254 76 59 16 1
1164 I'll have what she's having 1.2368 0.06175 76 62 10 4
1165 I’m not repressed. I just block everything. 1.2366 0.05162 93 74 16 3
1166 It's just like with my parents. They put me in the middle and make me pick a side. 1.2366 0.04687 93 72 20 1
1167 I have nightmares about soccer announcers who scream "GOOOOOOOAL!!" 1.2366 0.05162 93 74 16 3
1168 A Freudian slip let the last goal through. 1.2366 0.05162 93 74 16 3
1169 My mind keeps trying to block my goals. 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
1170 Surprisingly, I was really great at dodgeball. 1.2361 0.05764 72 57 13 2
1171 So a goalie really should be a masochist? 1.2361 0.06094 72 58 11 3
1172 So then he kicks the ball and I don't know what to expect...... but you know like I need to know. 1.2360 0.04800 89 69 19 1
1173 It's a lot harder than it looks. 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
1174 Defensive? Me? Who would have thought it? 1.2353 0.05058 102 82 16 4
1175 VAR has ruined couples therapy 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
1176 He just doesn’t respect my boundaries 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
1177 I feel like everyone just thinks I'm in the way. 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
1178 Why is it always on me to save the situation? 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
1179 I am here to talk about MY GOALS, not his! 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
1180 I feel under attack in my “safe space”. 1.2347 0.04541 98 76 21 1
1181 But if I stop being so defensive, what then? 1.2347 0.05389 98 80 13 5
1182 Setting new goals is a good thing, right? 1.2347 0.04767 98 77 19 2
1183 I have a hard time making goals. 1.2347 0.05389 98 80 13 5
1184 I feel like this penalty is unfair. 1.2346 0.05349 81 64 15 2
1185 What are my goals? That’s the problem. I have too many goals. 1.2346 0.05053 81 63 17 1
1186 I don’t know why I’m so defensive. 1.2346 0.05898 81 66 11 4
1187 I'm trying to draw a foul. Play along. 1.2346 0.05898 81 66 11 4
1188 I have this fear that my goal will be fulfilled 1.2346 0.05349 81 64 15 2
1189 We’ve got plenty of time, Doc. That last play has been in VAR review since last Tuesday. 1.2346 0.05630 81 65 13 3
1190 Why can't I be like other soccer players and NOT use my hands? 1.2344 0.04365 128 102 22 4
1191 That where we disagree. I think I can have a happy and fulfilling life without goals. 1.2340 0.05332 94 76 14 4
1192 Can you two hurry up? I've got a goal in life too. 1.2340 0.05332 94 76 14 4
1193 I know it's called a penalty shot, but it's not your fault. 1.2340 0.04884 94 74 18 2
1194 I was actually hoping for some extra time. 1.2340 0.04644 94 73 20 1
1195 Is it soccer or is it football. 1.2340 0.05332 94 76 14 4
1196 Coach says if this doesn’t help he’s calling my mother. 1.2340 0.05332 94 76 14 4
1197 How do I convince her that I’m a keeper? 1.2340 0.05542 94 77 12 5
1198 I feel like I'm always on the defensive. 1.2338 0.05514 77 61 14 2
1199 So then I asked myself, "wait, Doug--is having no goals really a good thing for Doug?" And here we are. 1.2338 0.05816 77 62 12 3
1200 I seem to only attract men who want to stalk me and get into my net 1.2338 0.05816 77 62 12 3
1201 But why should I care how others get their kicks? 1.2338 0.05195 77 60 16 1
1202 What if it’s ME that’s blocked? 1.2338 0.05514 77 61 14 2
1203 Coach doesn't understand me. 1.2336 0.05070 107 87 15 5
1204 This isn’t what I meant when I asked for training at goal-keeping. 1.2336 0.05070 107 87 15 5
1205 Id yelled”off sides!” then I heard Ego say,“who cares?” 1.2333 0.05253 90 72 15 3
1206 I feel everybody is against me... 1.2333 0.05009 90 71 17 2
1207 Sports psychologist called in to play for persecution complex 1.2333 0.04754 90 70 19 1
1208 Father was distant, always downfield. Mother hovered, never far from the box. 1.2333 0.05009 90 71 17 2
1209 If my teammates can flop, I can flounder. 1.2333 0.05253 90 72 15 3
1210 You'll miss 100% of the shots you don't take. 1.2333 0.05485 90 73 13 4
1211 It's like he's intentionally sending me mixed signals. 1.2330 0.04820 103 82 18 3
1212 Scoring? " 1.2329 0.05349 73 57 15 1
1213 Timeout! I need to talk about why my Father never hugged me. 1.2329 0.05694 73 58 13 2
1214 I always get singled out for being the only one who can use their hands 1.2329 0.04981 73 56 17 0
1215 But then the kangaroo gave me her sweater. 1.2329 0.06327 73 60 9 4
1216 It's the middle of the game, I'm talking to Freud, and then there"s an insurance commercial” 1.2329 0.05349 73 57 15 1
1217 The minute things are going well, I do something to sabotage my success. 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
1218 This goal makes me feel so small. I should have played hockey. 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
1219 But Doctor, I am Pele. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
1220 I always loved baseball. Should I pursue baseball? 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
1221 Goalie placed in Penalty Box! 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
1222 It all started with those damned vuvuzelas. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
1223 Is now a good time to say I chose the wrong sport? 1.2323 0.05142 99 80 15 4
1224 When I was a kid, I never said “I want to be the guy who shuts down other people’s goals.” 1.2323 0.04725 99 78 19 2
1225 Everyone in my life tells me I’m so controlling that I end up blocking their goals. 1.2323 0.04938 99 79 17 3
1226 I tried so hard to please him when he tells me it's soccer, not football. 1.2319 0.05892 69 55 12 2
1227 I'm still searching for my soooooooooouuuuuuul 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
1228 Talk about time out. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
1229 I'd say my biggest problem is procrastination. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
1230 I understand it's a defense mechanism but can you just scooch your chair back about a foot? 1.2317 0.04688 82 63 19 0
1231 Best case he hits you in the head. 1.2316 0.04601 95 74 20 1
1232 My wife says I'm always on the defensive. 1.2316 0.04838 95 75 18 2
1233 It might seem perverse, but I just love keeping people from achieving their goals. 1.2316 0.05281 95 77 14 4
1234 I just can't get up for this anymore." 1.2315 0.05361 108 90 11 7
1235 By blocking the goal, I'm also blocking my emotions. 1.2308 0.05651 91 75 11 5
1236 When coach said I needed to analyze my goal tending, I never imagined this! 1.2308 0.04708 91 71 19 1
1237 He strikes spheres into me. 1.2308 0.05748 78 63 12 3
1238 I know I’m not stupid but I feel like everything is over my head. 1.2308 0.04961 91 72 17 2
1239 And then my Mother says, 'Goalie Schmoley'... 1.2308 0.05451 78 62 14 2
1240 And why do you think you've been feeling defensive? 1.2308 0.04779 104 83 18 3
1241 I can’t help it. I just wanted one little bite! 1.2308 0.05748 78 63 12 3
1242 So Doc, I’m conflicted over this penalty kick, because I bear the entire weight of an infraction I had nothing to do with. 1.2308 0.05333 104 86 12 6
1243 What did Goethe say？ 1.2308 0.06301 78 65 8 5
1244 So you're telling me my problem is I'm no-goal oriented? 1.2308 0.06031 78 64 10 4
1245 It’s not what he kicked it’s HOW he kicked it… 1.2308 0.05201 91 73 15 3
1246 It feels like I am constantly on the defensive. 1.2308 0.05748 78 63 12 3
1247 My goals were beyond this. 1.2308 0.05431 91 74 13 4
1248 I hate trying to live up to other people’s expectations! 1.2300 0.04462 100 78 21 1
1249 I shouldn’t have to defend my goals, right? 1.2300 0.04894 100 80 17 3
1250 Why do I need to block things? I've become my father. 1.2299 0.05092 87 69 16 2
1251 It's just that my safety nets aren't what they used to be. 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
1252 I feel like I have no goal in life, and everything is passing me by. 1.2299 0.05827 87 72 10 5
1253 Listen mate, time out’s over! 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
1254 I think my goals in life are pretty obvious. 1.2297 0.06249 74 61 9 4
1255 Thanks for seeing me at work. 1.2297 0.05945 74 60 11 3
1256 It's like I'm always performing for an audience. 1.2297 0.05945 74 60 11 3
1257 My life just seems like a series of blocks. 1.2297 0.05625 74 59 13 2
1258 No one recognizes my goals. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
1259 So, where were we? Oh yeah, being more goal-oreinted. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
1260 "I'm sad because people are booing me as we speak." 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
1261 The recurring penalty shot dream seems so real. 1.2289 0.05235 83 66 15 2
1262 It always has to be about his goals. 1.2289 0.05235 83 66 15 2
1263 Maybe I'm over thinking this. 1.2289 0.05235 83 66 15 2
1264 I'm having this recurring nightmare where a man with the number ten on his back is kicking a ball at my head 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
1265 At work it feels like the game is on the line and it's all on my shoulders. 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
1266 I just feel like I’m never able to set my own goals. 1.2286 0.05449 70 55 14 1
1267 Dr. Goldberg, how would YOU feel after every mistake you made, an announcer would scream,”GOLLLLLLDBERG! 1.2286 0.05110 105 86 14 5
1268 I know I’m deflecting, but that’s literally my job. 1.2286 0.05055 70 54 16 0
1269 The session isn’t over, Doc, there’s stoppage time. 1.2286 0.06163 70 57 10 3
1270 …..and my dad was always trying to explain the concept of offsides… 1.2283 0.05150 92 74 15 3
1271 Well Doc, it all started when I never hit in dodgeball 1.2283 0.04913 92 73 17 2
1272 I need my world cup to runneth over. 1.2283 0.05595 92 76 11 5
1273 She said, "I wanna talk now." I said, "There's a time and a place." 1.2283 0.05595 92 76 11 5
1274 Do you think you might be blocking something in your past? 1.2283 0.05377 92 75 13 4
1275 The dreams always end with the announcer shouting: "Goaaaaaaal" 1.2278 0.05683 79 64 12 3
1276 I don't feel like trusting people's clear indications of their actions. 1.2278 0.05683 79 64 12 3
1277 Dive left, dive right, jump left, jump right? Analysis paralysis. Help! 1.2278 0.05390 79 63 14 2
1278 So now I’m the keeper of what exactly? 1.2278 0.05683 79 64 12 3
1279 I'm usually a very goal oriented person, but lately I don't know. 1.2277 0.05428 101 84 11 6
1280 Maybe my problem is I don’t have any goals of my own. 1.2273 0.06758 66 55 7 4
1281 Until you read Handke's "The Anxiety of the Goalie at the Penalty Kick," you'll never understand my disorder. 1.2273 0.05041 88 70 16 2
1282 I've always had a problem setting realistic goals for myself. 1.2273 0.04775 88 69 18 1
1283 I do have other goals in life. 1.2273 0.05294 88 71 14 3
1284 I suppose this is what you'd call exposure therapy. 1.2273 0.05294 88 71 14 3
1285 I seem to have this feeling of impending doom 1.2268 0.05182 97 79 14 4
1286 I just don't know if this whole goalkeeper things gonna work out 1.2268 0.04750 97 77 18 2
1287 I just feel like they're not respecting my space. 1.2267 0.05224 75 59 15 1
1288 Doc, these are the nicest extra minutes I've ever had. 1.2267 0.06173 75 62 9 4
1289 But I self-identify as a 'soccer' player!" 1.2267 0.05558 75 60 13 2
1290 You’re right. I have been using my hands as a defense mechanism. 1.2267 0.05558 75 60 13 2
1291 I feel like I don't do anything wrong but somebody is always taking a shot. 1.2264 0.04503 106 84 20 2
1292 See, that's the thing, I don't want to be thought of as an obstructionist. 1.2264 0.04299 106 83 22 1
1293 I keep trying to tell myself that sometimes a goal is just a goal. 1.2264 0.04886 106 86 16 4
1294 I like what you’ve done with your office. 1.2262 0.05706 84 69 11 4
1295 I just can’t let my guard down. 1.2262 0.05179 84 67 15 2
1296 So tell me about your goals 1.2262 0.04895 84 66 17 1
1297 Your fifty minutes are up. 1.2262 0.06189 84 71 7 6
1298 I just think I’d be happier if I was able to stop defending the mistakes of others. 1.2262 0.04592 84 65 19 0
1299 My mother doesn't understand why I don't want any goals in life 1.2258 0.05325 93 76 13 4
1300 I just keep reminding myself, “when they go high, we go low.” 1.2254 0.05743 71 57 12 2
1301 Finally, someone is asking me about MY goals. 1.2254 0.05743 71 57 12 2
1302 Sometimes I feel I overthink things. 1.2254 0.05382 71 56 14 1
1303 I need help with my blocking 1.2254 0.06084 71 58 10 3
1304 When I complain about not reaching my own goals, they tell me I'm being too defensive. 1.2254 0.05743 71 57 12 2
1305 My teammates keep telling me to stop it. 1.2250 0.04698 80 62 18 0
1306 I guess left, he goes right. I guess low, he goes high. 1.2247 0.04990 89 71 16 2
1307 I am constantly concerned that either a miss, or a save, could set off an international conflagration. 1.2247 0.04449 89 69 20 0
1308 They accused me of running out the clock. 1.2247 0.05240 89 72 14 3
1309 So this is confidential right? 1.2247 0.05478 89 73 12 4
1310 I just feel like everyone avoids me. 1.2247 0.05478 89 73 12 4
1311 I feel like everyone around me is going somewhere and I'm just stuck in place. 1.2247 0.04728 89 70 18 1
1312 I only got into this for the kicks. 1.2247 0.05240 89 72 14 3
1313 I didn’t cause the problem, why do I have to solve it. 1.2247 0.05707 89 74 10 5
1314 I’m working on my goals. 1.2245 0.05135 98 80 14 4
1315 I feel like everyone sees me as an obstacle to their goals. 1.2245 0.04707 98 78 18 2
1316 last we left off you were talking about the pressure of your goals weighing on you 1.2245 0.05135 98 80 14 4
1317 I told her, mom, being a goaltender is really stressful" 1.2245 0.05335 98 81 12 5
1318 I know how much it hurts to lose. I don't want to be responsible for their suffering 1.2243 0.05023 107 88 14 5
1319 I'm just not feeling this penalty kick. 1.2239 0.06316 67 55 9 3
1320 It's ok coach. I got this. 1.2239 0.06316 67 55 9 3
1321 I just don't have any goals. 1.2237 0.05493 76 61 13 2
1322 Am I really paranoid if they keep kicking that ball at me 1.2237 0.05493 76 61 13 2
1323 I just always feel like a ball is flying at my face. 1.2237 0.05803 76 62 11 3
1324 They make me wear a different-coloured shirt. 1.2237 0.05493 76 61 13 2
1325 It’s like they wish I weren’t here at all. 1.2237 0.05493 76 61 13 2
1326 I guess left, I guess right. No matter what, I'm wrong! 1.2235 0.05125 85 68 15 2
1327 So am I a soccer player or a football player? 1.2235 0.05645 85 70 11 4
1328 I keep seeing the goal, but that's not working for me. 1.2235 0.05391 85 69 13 3
1329 ...my teeth start falling out and then I wake up. Do you think that means top left or straight down the middle? 1.2235 0.05125 85 68 15 2
1330 Senility shot. 1.2235 0.05645 85 70 11 4
1331 You SAID I could call you anytime! 1.2235 0.05391 85 69 13 3
1332 It all started with my lack of goals. 1.2235 0.05645 85 70 11 4
1333 I think that maybe instead of just keeping I should try to start giving, you know? 1.2235 0.05391 85 69 13 3
1334 The penalty is always on someone else, but I'm the one who gets shot at! 1.2235 0.05125 85 68 15 2
1335 I just don’t feel I’m very goal oriented. 1.2235 0.04844 85 67 17 1
1336 I worry what happens to #10's life if I stop his shot. 1.2235 0.05645 85 70 11 4
1337 I need to reassess my goals in life 1.2235 0.05125 85 68 15 2
1338 And then I think, what if he knows that I know that he knows that I know where he is going to shoot. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
1339 They’re always invading my space. 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
1340 They said I needed a safety net 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
1341 My whole life I've been using defense mechanisms. 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
1342 Everyone keeps taking shots at me, I feel attacked. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
1343 I’ve always had trouble being goal oriented. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
1344 thanks for seeing me, my performance anxiety is just so high right now. 1.2233 0.04962 103 84 15 4
1345 It’s a net ceiling doc. 1.2233 0.04962 103 84 15 4
1346 Sometimes I wish I could make my own goals, instead of stopping others from achieving theirs. I’m not a goalie, I’m a bully. 1.2233 0.05150 103 85 13 5
1347 I need help with my defense mechanism. 1.2222 0.05423 90 74 12 4
1348 At least I'm buying 45 minutes of stoppage time. 1.2222 0.05648 90 75 10 5
1349 My wife says I'm nothing but net. 1.2222 0.06007 72 59 10 3
1350 Coach: “JESUS CHRIST! TAKE THE SHOT! IT IS WIDE OPEN! HE’S LITERALLY LAYING ON A FUCKING COUCH! JUST TAKE THE SHOT GOD DAMMIT! OH MY GOD WE ARE GUNNA LOSE BECAUSE NUMBER 10 CAN’T MAKE A GODDAMN DECISION. HOLY SHIT YOU ARE SO FUCKING USELESS” 1.2222 0.05648 90 75 10 5
1351 I’m always getting in the way of my own goals. 1.2222 0.04969 81 64 16 1
1352 We all got trophies, that’s why I’m here. 1.2222 0.05672 72 58 12 2
1353 No on seems to care that I,too,have some goals I would like to achieve. 1.2222 0.05286 99 82 12 5
1354 Goals? I don’t have any goals 1.2222 0.04682 90 71 18 1
1355 No, I don't think the shooter is my mother; I just don't want them to score. 1.2222 0.05648 90 75 10 5
1356 Mom always wanted a midfielder. 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
1357 I feel like, if I make a mistake, I'll disappoint millions of people. 1.2222 0.05316 72 57 14 1
1358 Just one more kick while I’m already down… 1.2222 0.05672 72 58 12 2
1359 I don't know why I bother, I just end up getting in the way of everything. 1.2222 0.04407 90 70 20 0
1360 Wish I had a right foot of Ronaldo. 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
1361 Sometimes I feel like I get in my own way. 1.2222 0.05270 81 65 14 2
1362 I’m not being defensive. 1.2222 0.05270 81 65 14 2
1363 It’s about time I start working on saving myself, for a change 1.2222 0.04407 90 70 20 0
1364 Be up in a sec. My therapist is helping me work on clearer goals. 1.2212 0.04523 104 83 19 2
1365 “Yes, yes… I think I’ll be ready to resume play once I’ve resolved my birth trauma, Oedipus complex, phallic fears, latency despondency, adolescence angst, identity confusion, failure to launch, and approaching midlife crisis.” 1.2211 0.05831 95 81 7 7
1366 I just don't know which direction to choose. 1.2211 0.05004 95 77 15 3
1367 I feel myself getting smaller and smaller. 1.2209 0.05825 86 72 9 5
1368 Shouldn't it really be more about MY goals? 1.2209 0.05072 86 69 15 2
1369 You know, sometimes I feel like it all just keeps passing me by. 1.2209 0.05072 86 69 15 2
1370 I struggle with goals in general. 1.2209 0.05825 86 72 9 5
1371 My mother said I wasn’t goal oriented 1.2208 0.05735 77 63 11 3
1372 Actually, I'd rather not talk about goals, if you don't mind. 1.2208 0.05429 77 62 13 2
1373 I never seem to have enough time to do a great job. 1.2208 0.05735 77 63 11 3
1374 It's football-- I want a helmet and pads. 1.2208 0.06303 77 65 7 5
1375 Goal oriented perhaps, I just feel my net worth isn't being recognized" 1.2208 0.05735 77 63 11 3
1376 Sometimes I feel like the entire world is watching me 1.2206 0.06231 68 56 9 3
1377 We just go back and forth without making any progress. 1.2206 0.05869 68 55 11 2
1378 I feel so alone out here. 1.2206 0.05869 68 55 11 2
1379 I'm not saying I feel trapped, but just once, I'd love to run to the far end of the field. 1.2206 0.05869 68 55 11 2
1380 You have to let go of the past and just be in the moment 1.2206 0.06231 68 56 9 3
1381 There are just so many balls in the air right now 1.2206 0.05482 68 54 13 1
1382 If not this, what is your goal? 1.2202 0.04939 109 90 14 5
1383 I see diving and screaming and hand waving. Over and over. And I don’t know what to do. 1.2200 0.05041 100 82 14 4
1384 Goalies excel in mental blocks. 1.2200 0.04837 100 81 16 3
1385 What do you mean I have no balls? 1.2200 0.05041 100 82 14 4
1386 The nightmare is always the same, Doc. The fans all call football soccer. 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
1387 You keep saying I'm blocking,but isn't that what I'm supposed to do? 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
1388 It's not that I'm afraid of the ball - I think the ball's afraid of me. 1.2198 0.05591 91 76 10 5
1389 …Even the new guy at work wants to take a shot at me. 1.2198 0.04893 91 73 16 2
1390 I'm troubled with my career goals. 1.2195 0.04916 82 65 16 1
1391 Sometimes I just feel like I'm the only thing standing between everyone and their goals. 1.2195 0.05213 82 66 14 2
1392 I can’t help feeling I should be doing something about my goals. 1.2195 0.04599 82 64 18 0
1393 Its been really hard letting people in 1.2195 0.05762 82 68 10 4
1394 What Savior Complex? 1.2195 0.05494 82 67 12 3
1395 I'm just not sure people will still love me if I really open up? 1.2195 0.05213 82 66 14 2
1396 Four score and seven years ago... 1.2193 0.04087 114 90 23 1
1397 My bad. I meant, can we move our session to NEXT Tuesday. 1.2192 0.05932 73 60 10 3
1398 I just don't want to be so defensive any more. 1.2192 0.05251 73 58 14 1
1399 I just don't get a kick out of this job anymore. 1.2192 0.05251 73 58 14 1
1400 I'm concerned about being an obstacle in other peoples' lives. 1.2188 0.05208 64 50 14 0
1401 I want to play with their minds same way they play with mine. 1.2188 0.04492 96 76 19 1
1402 Hey! Move! 1.2188 0.04957 96 78 15 3
1403 I just feel like I'm moving in the wrong direction. 1.2188 0.04492 96 76 19 1
1404 I just don't get why we broke up. She said I was a keeper. 1.2188 0.05208 64 50 14 0
1405 My boundaries are just constantly at odds with his goals. 1.2188 0.04957 96 78 15 3
1406 No… it’s not your parents. They will still love you. But if that ball goes by, I just don’t know how these fans will react” 1.2184 0.05279 87 71 13 3
1407 I became a keeper to keep mother’s love. 1.2184 0.04746 87 69 17 1
1408 I've been so busy stopping other people's goals, I've never taken the time to achieve any goals for myself. 1.2184 0.05991 87 74 7 6
1409 I have this fear of flying objects. Can you help me? 1.2184 0.05019 87 70 15 2
1410 I suppose I need to think outside the box 1.2184 0.05279 87 71 13 3
1411 So, it’s goalkeeping vs my deep-seated need to be liked. 1.2184 0.05019 87 70 15 2
1412 Can you leave the couch? 1.2179 0.05954 78 65 9 4
1413 Doctor, you were right! It really was just a defense mechanism. 1.2179 0.04705 78 61 17 0
1414 ‘Yes, I guess I am a little distracted today.’ 1.2179 0.05046 78 62 15 1
1415 I seem to get in the way of other people's goals. 1.2179 0.05668 78 64 11 3
1416 I’ve always been too goal-oriented, Doc. 1.2179 0.05366 78 63 13 2
1417 My father would have dove left. 1.2179 0.05954 78 65 9 4
1418 And when did your delusions of being a superstar goalkeeper first begin? 1.2178 0.05190 101 84 12 5
1419 Have you ever had the feeling that achieving your goals means the others won’t? 1.2178 0.04361 101 80 20 1
1420 But, Doctor, why do you keep bringing up the goals in my life? 1.2174 0.05792 69 56 11 2
1421 He's a 10, but he keeps kicking things at me 1.2174 0.05792 69 56 11 2
1422 Well, it all began with mother. 1.2174 0.05315 92 76 12 4
1423 We'll tell you wben we can resume ! 1.2174 0.05792 69 56 11 2
1424 I need to stop getting in the middle of things 1.2174 0.06149 69 57 9 3
1425 I have this terrible fear of letting things in. 1.2174 0.06149 69 57 9 3
1426 I identify as straight, but guys are always trying to score on me. 1.2174 0.06149 69 57 9 3
1427 Coach told me to shrink the net 1.2174 0.05411 69 55 13 1
1428 I think these sessions after missed goals are really helping. Can you keep your schedule open? 1.2169 0.05698 83 69 10 4
1429 They said that I was pretending to be hurt. 1.2169 0.04551 83 65 18 0
1430 Is this my alter ego? 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
1431 OK, this recreates the dream, but I'm still just not feelin' it. 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
1432 Is he still staring at us? 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
1433 Do you think my goals are too big? 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
1434 I just can’t call it football, I’m sorry.. 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
1435 My mother wanted me to be a goalkeeper, but now I'm not so sure. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
1436 I don’t feel like I have any goals. 1.2162 0.04818 74 58 16 0
1437 I find I’m always jumping from one thing to the next. 1.2162 0.05533 74 60 12 2
1438 when you said life goals i didn't take it litteraly 1.2162 0.05858 74 61 10 3
1439 I feel like I'm under constant attack, and at the same time blamed for the smallest mistake! 1.2162 0.04818 74 58 16 0
1440 I can’t keep my goals, Doctor 1.2162 0.05858 74 61 10 3
1441 No, I can't tell you in which direction he will shoot the ball. It's confidential. 1.2162 0.04818 74 58 16 0
1442 Soccer, right? I mean, it's a round ball. But you do use your feet. Football? Uggggh. 1.2162 0.05858 74 61 10 3
1443 I always wanted to be a baseball catcher. 1.2162 0.05188 74 59 14 1
1444 No way he gets minutes for stoppage time forsseeing his psychiatrist. 1.2162 0.05533 74 60 12 2
1445 But I did identify as the World Cup Champion. 1.2159 0.04698 88 70 17 1
1446 Do you ever feel like everyone is watching you? 1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
1447 It's like I'm in a Wim Wenders' film. 1.2159 0.04698 88 70 17 1
1448 I’m trying to psych out the other team . 1.2159 0.04698 88 70 17 1
1449 I’m working on being less defensive. 1.2159 0.04698 88 70 17 1
1450 My dad always wanted me to play baseball. 1.2157 0.04951 102 84 14 4
1451 Well, I've been told that I have a problem with time management. 1.2154 0.06002 65 53 10 2
1452 Doc,every time you tell me to leap upper left and every time the ball goes lower right 1.2154 0.06002 65 53 10 2
1453 I hope we're not in his way. 1.2154 0.06390 65 54 8 3
1454 I tend to be competitive. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
1455 I sometimes feel like a caged animal. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
1456 On field therapy does slow down the game a lot. 1.2152 0.04653 79 62 17 0
1457 Doc, I can’t shake this caged in feeling. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
1458 Winning isn’t EVERYTHING - is it? 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
1459 You see, professor, I’m our last line of defense. If I fail, the unconscious erupts, civilization collapses - and the other team wins. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
1460 I usually get a kick out of these sessions 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
1461 Everyone keeps saying I'm too defensive. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
1462 I keep a lot *in* as well as out 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
1463 But where are MY kicks, Doc? 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
1464 I feel all this pressure. I don't know what it is. I don't know if it will ever stop. 1.2151 0.04548 93 74 18 1
1465 I’m on the field naked ,and my mother’s head is the ball taunting my outstretched foot. 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
1466 But how can I not have goals in life? 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
1467 I'm tired of getting penalty for someone else's mistake. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
1468 Move left, right, or stay in the middle—it's all so confusing. 1.2143 0.04812 84 67 16 1
1469 To dive right, or to the left, that is the question... 1.2143 0.05342 70 56 13 1
1470 Why can't I just ignore the goals and live in the moment? 1.2143 0.05375 84 69 12 3
1471 Sometimes I wonder if I’d benefit from a less goal-oriented workplace 1.2143 0.05342 70 56 13 1
1472 My girlfriend doesn’t think I’m a keeper. 1.2143 0.06068 70 58 9 3
1473 I dive left, I dive right... what does it really mean in the end? 1.2143 0.04648 112 92 16 4
1474 Explain to me again what Messi phobia is? 1.2143 0.04812 84 67 16 1
1475 If only my life wasn't so Messi. 1.2143 0.05342 70 56 13 1
1476 It's not that I have a savior complex ... 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
1477 No offense, Doc, but I think I really need a psychic. 1.2143 0.05342 70 56 13 1
1478 Stop me if this is out of bounds. 1.2143 0.05342 70 56 13 1
1479 Doc, let's look at my childhood on VAR. 1.2143 0.05375 84 69 12 3
1480 Am I in HIS head yet? 1.2143 0.04812 84 67 16 1
1481 It’s like they get a kick out of it. 1.2143 0.05101 84 68 14 2
1482 So you’re saying this is really my inner child feeling put in a defensive position? 1.2143 0.05375 84 69 12 3
1483 #therapygoals 1.2143 0.05101 84 68 14 2
1484 Actually, I have too many people in my corner. 1.2143 0.05375 84 69 12 3
1485 My center forward hates me. 1.2136 0.04907 103 85 14 4
1486 I can't understand why the press keeps writing that I constantly sabotage our games. 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
1487 I know, no matter what, I'm a keeper 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
1488 I need the goal to shrink. 1.2135 0.05171 89 73 13 3
1489 So what's your goal for this game? 1.2135 0.04918 89 72 15 2
1490 I mean, what am I really "Saving" anyway? 1.2135 0.05412 89 74 11 4
1491 So I told the coach it was only a game…. 1.2135 0.04918 89 72 15 2
1492 My timing's been off lately. 1.2135 0.05412 89 74 11 4
1493 All these years I thought I was playing rugby. 1.2133 0.05467 75 61 12 2
1494 So, you got off on the wrong foot with your father? 1.2133 0.04762 75 59 16 0
1495 Sometimes I wish the ball would just save itself, ya know? 1.2133 0.05467 75 61 12 2
1496 I just feel like I don't have any goals in life... 1.2128 0.04752 94 76 16 2
1497 But, I don't ask for approval when I achieve goals in my life. They just clap. 1.2128 0.05212 94 78 12 4
1498 You say I'm paranoid, but I know people are out there, ready to kick rounded-spheres at me, Doc. 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
1499 I guess I'm just not that goal oriented. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
1500 What if getting goals… isn’t the only goal? 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
1501 My coach thinks I’m a soccer player, but I grew up playing dodgeball. 1.2125 0.05817 80 67 9 4
1502 I'm just so sick of preventing people from achieving their goals. 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
1503 Doc - can you help me understand why I always feel so vulnerable 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
1504 Maybe I am a little defensive, but it seems like everyone is always taking shots at me. 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
1505 But the big question is, "What are my goals?" 1.2125 0.04602 80 63 17 0
1506 But there is so much riding on this! 1.2121 0.06301 66 55 8 3
1507 Why do I always feel like I am lying down on the job? 1.2121 0.06301 66 55 8 3
1508 How is this going to help my mommy issues?? 1.2119 0.04792 118 99 13 6
1509 I need to talk about MY goals. 1.2118 0.05575 85 71 10 4
1510 I'm sorry, doctor, if this may sound a bit defensive... 1.2118 0.05047 85 69 14 2
1511 Hmm, very interesting. A man who's not looking to score. 1.2118 0.04762 85 68 16 1
1512 I’m thinking upper right, but then maybe lower left, or possibly straight on! 1.2118 0.04762 85 68 16 1
1513 Something is keeping me from reaching my goal. 1.2118 0.05820 85 72 8 5
1514 My wife keeps telling me it’s good to have goals in life. 1.2118 0.05047 85 69 14 2
1515 It's just hard for me to want goals in my life. 1.2118 0.04458 85 67 18 0
1516 ….and I feel as though I’m missing the point! 1.2118 0.05575 85 71 10 4
1517 Could it be I chose the wrong goal? 1.2118 0.05317 85 70 12 3
1518 I don’t know why I feel the need to stand in the way of others’ goals 1.2113 0.05644 71 58 11 2
1519 It worked for Ted Lasso 1.2113 0.06317 71 60 7 4
1520 My life is an open net. 1.2113 0.04879 71 56 15 0
1521 I’m trying to visualize the outcome, Doc. 1.2113 0.05644 71 58 11 2
1522 Is it football or is it soccer? Not knowing is driving me insane. 1.2113 0.05990 71 59 9 3
1523 Sometimes I feel like the whole world is watching me, waiting for me to make a mistake. 1.2113 0.05644 71 58 11 2
1524 I have no problem keeping it out...I just can't let it in 1.2111 0.05119 90 74 13 3
1525 I just feel I should be focusing more on *my* goals instead of everyone else’s. 1.2111 0.05119 90 74 13 3
1526 I have a catastrophic problem with boundaries. 1.2111 0.04605 90 72 17 1
1527 Work is just so stressful right now. 1.2105 0.04940 95 78 14 3
1528 This is just not the Football I imagined. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
1529 It's like I'm always waiting for someone else to make the first move. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
1530 So Doc, I have a problem, too many goals. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
1531 It feels way too Freudian 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
1532 My goals often differ from most. 1.2105 0.04708 76 60 16 0
1533 I feel I'm caught in a net and struggling to defend 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
1534 Will this therapy help my knee? 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
1535 Hey guys? Maybe convert to Telehealth for this session? 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
1536 ...and I have this recurring dream that I'm surrounded by a faceless crowd that is becoming increasingly impatient while I go waffling on... 1.2100 0.05374 100 85 9 6
1537 I just can seem to get over my ongoing hallucination that I'm a goalie in The World Cup. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
1538 So how does it make you feel they're trying to avoid you? 1.2099 0.05187 81 66 13 2
1539 And then they kicked the ball just over my head, which reminded me of my dominating father … and finally they got the damn thing right in the net (sniff, sniff), which just symbolized my entire humiliating childhood … 1.2099 0.05187 81 66 13 2
1540 I have no gggggggoooooooaaaaaalllllll in life. 1.2099 0.05476 81 67 11 3
1541 My mother thought this was my ticket to med school 1.2099 0.05476 81 67 11 3
1542 I can't help but feel that everyone else is moving forward and I'm stuck in the same place 1.2099 0.04880 81 65 15 1
1543 Double score does not exist 1.2099 0.05476 81 67 11 3
1544 Trust me, I'm getting better at living in the moment, Doc 1.2099 0.04880 81 65 15 1
1545 It's always #10 and I haven't done anything. 1.2097 0.06560 62 52 7 3
1546 Why do they all want me to fail? 1.2097 0.05212 62 49 13 0
1547 ‘Sometimes I can’t help but think I’m the only obstacle in the way of my goals’ 1.2097 0.05697 62 50 11 1
1548 Football is not football, a cup is not a cup, a rose is not a rose... 1.2093 0.05758 86 73 8 5
1549 Is it just me, or is -- in fact -- the whole world watching? 1.2093 0.04712 86 69 16 1
1550 You've got to let me do this on my own, Dad!" 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
1551 People say I can get very defensive. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
1552 Does freezing their kicker make me a bad person? 1.2093 0.04712 86 69 16 1
1553 Sorry to be so defensive, but maybe I keep my guard up for a reason. 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
1554 Doc, I’m losing it. I would rather stop the vuvuzelas than the penalty kick. 1.2090 0.06214 67 56 8 3
1555 I say football; he says soccer. Then, I get defensive. 1.2090 0.05839 67 55 10 2
1556 My mother told me not to use my hands. 1.2090 0.05438 67 54 12 1
1557 My mother told me to block everything 1.2090 0.05839 67 55 10 2
1558 Doc, I feel like I’m constantly under attack! 1.2090 0.05438 67 54 12 1
1559 he says by blocking goals "I'm blocking people out of my life"... 1.2090 0.05438 67 54 12 1
1560 That’s his goal, but it’s not mine. 1.2090 0.05839 67 55 10 2
1561 I couldn’t even save my marriage. 1.2090 0.05839 67 55 10 2
1562 I guess it really is all about goals in life. 1.2090 0.05438 67 54 12 1
1563 I suppose this is another kind of 'header'. 1.2090 0.05839 67 55 10 2
1564 The world is falling apart, but all I can think about is Lionel Messi. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
1565 That's all the time we have now, but we'll take this up again during extra time. 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
1566 I thought a lot about what you said last week about goals. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
1567 I hate one to ones. 1.2083 0.04663 96 78 16 2
1568 I feel unsettled. Every 45 minutes my goal changes. 1.2083 0.06235 72 61 7 4
1569 You said I should stop being so defensive, but that only made things worse. 1.2083 0.05913 72 60 9 3
1570 The rare Jungian defense 1.2083 0.05322 96 81 10 5
1571 I was perfectly happy as an accountant but wife insisted I become more goal oriented. Now, I just block everything! 1.2083 0.05573 72 59 11 2
1572 No, Doc! Soccer! Not sock her! 1.2083 0.04820 72 57 15 0
1573 I hope he's blocked too 1.2083 0.05573 72 59 11 2
1574 Do you see Messi in the room with us right now? 1.2083 0.05913 72 60 9 3
1575 Annnd we’ll be back with more on-field action right after this brief mental injury timeout. 1.2079 0.05135 101 85 11 5
1576 But who will save me? 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
1577 In my nightmare the announcer speaks Spanish. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
1578 You really think you can trick me into learning to deal with pressure like this?!? 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
1579 Although not the greatest goalie- Edward soon became known as the most creative player in the league at flopping. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
1580 Well Doc, I am just tired of meeting goals. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
1581 It wasn’t my penalty… 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
1582 Do you think it is healthy for you to prevent other people from reaching for their goals? 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
1583 When I was small, the other kids always made fun of my knees. 1.2078 0.04654 77 61 16 0
1584 If we run long, will there be extra time? 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
1585 I seem to be drawn to things that need saving. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1586 I try to set good goals but always stop short of achieving them. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
1587 Why do I always have to do the saving? 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
1588 It's just that ties are so... unfulfilling. 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
1589 Suddenly I realized I didn't know my goal in life. 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
1590 “But shouldn’t I try to get a grip instead of blocking everything out?” 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1591 I'm not going to hide behind the net anymore, Doc. I identify as a Striker. 1.2073 0.04504 82 65 17 0
1592 Didn't expect you to take me literally about not keeping score... 1.2072 0.04267 111 90 19 2
1593 I sometimes feel I'm under a lot of pressure. 1.2069 0.04942 87 71 14 2
1594 Why is everyone so obsessed with me? 1.2069 0.05206 87 72 12 3
1595 The sports psychology—save it.” 1.2069 0.05456 87 73 10 4
1596 I think I'd do a lot better with some distance. 1.2069 0.04664 87 70 16 1
1597 I just don’t seem to be reaching my goals. 1.2069 0.04942 87 71 14 2
1598 I just feel like I'm always in the way. 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
1599 Sometimes I feel like I need to let someone it. 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
1600 I’d feel empowered if I could wear the rainbow armband. 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
1601 I don’t want others to achieve their goals. 1.2065 0.04516 92 74 17 1
1602 Here now? He's ALWAYS here. Always close, I can sense it. And he's trying to nail me in the nuts! 1.2065 0.05687 92 79 7 6
1603 Im a striker trapped in a goalkeeper’s body 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
1604 What a Messi of a situation this is. 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
1605 I just don’t get why people are either saying that I’m too defensive or not enough. I just can’t win with these people. 1.2063 0.05616 63 51 11 1
1606 But then I realized the arbitrary nature of PKs reflects life’s ultimate futility and that OTs are the inauthentic construct. 1.2063 0.06463 63 53 7 3
1607 I have this fear of what's coming. 1.2059 0.05366 68 55 12 1
1608 But is it soccer or is it football? 1.2059 0.05366 68 55 12 1
1609 I feel like it's always up to me to clean up the mess made by others. 1.2059 0.05760 68 56 10 2
1610 But I want to help people ACHIEVE their goals. 1.2059 0.06130 68 57 8 3
1611 My work mates all think I'm very defensive. 1.2059 0.05760 68 56 10 2
1612 About goal keeping, I can get very defensive! 1.2059 0.04940 68 54 14 0
1613 So, this is one really crazy game, don't you think? 1.2059 0.05760 68 56 10 2
1614 I don't feel as though I have a goal in life. 1.2055 0.05146 73 59 13 1
1615 They aim for my head! 1.2055 0.05146 73 59 13 1
1616 So, you think everyone is trying to get one passed you? 1.2055 0.05839 73 61 9 3
1617 Of course I'm conflicted! My goals are completely opposed to his goals! 1.2055 0.05146 73 59 13 1
1618 '"THIS IS NOT WHAT I MEANT BY PSYCHING OUT THE TEAM." 1.2055 0.05146 73 59 13 1
1619 If the ball is me and the goal is my father's affection; why am I spending so much time guarding the net? 1.2055 0.04762 73 58 15 0
1620 I’m feeling pressure from all sides. 1.2055 0.04762 73 58 15 0
1621 What do you mean, 'too defensive?' 1.2055 0.05503 73 60 11 2
1622 I’m sensing a fourth wall. 1.2055 0.05146 73 59 13 1
1623 Why doesn’t my life have any free kicks? 1.2055 0.05503 73 60 11 2
1624 It's always goalie this, goalie that. Never what are your goals. 1.2055 0.05146 73 59 13 1
1625 All I said was, "This is not football" 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
1626 Lift your arm up - I think he’s going top right. 1.2051 0.04602 78 62 16 0
1627 I’d like to continue my work on narrowing my goal. 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
1628 Everybody says I should focus on goals. 1.2051 0.04602 78 62 16 0
1629 I’m going to set some new goals this year. 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
1630 Everyone is so goal-oriented around here. 1.2051 0.04950 78 63 14 1
1631 I feel like people are always taking aim at me. 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
1632 I just feel like I’m under constant attack. 1.2051 0.04950 78 63 14 1
1633 See? Always answerable for the faults of others! 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
1634 It’s starting to get personal. 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
1635 Maybe I’m paranoid, but I feel like someone’s always trying to get something past me. 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
1636 They can wait. We're still analyzing the last play. 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
1637 Allowing stoppage time for mental health issues was way overdue. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
1638 I understand exposure therapy, but can we talk about my penalty kick phobia in your office? 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
1639 I just feel like everyone is always attacking me. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
1640 It's all coming at me at once - the people, the ball. I don't think I can handle it anymore. 1.2048 0.04775 83 67 15 1
1641 So last night I had this horrible dream that instead of being in goal at the World Cup during a pivotal moment for my country, I was in Arizona on a blind date with Kari Lake. 1.2045 0.05636 88 75 8 5
1642 I feel like no matter what we do, we get penalized. 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
1643 When did you first think that people are trying to get something past you? 1.2045 0.05636 88 75 8 5
1644 How can I convince her I'm a keeper? 1.2045 0.05636 88 75 8 5
1645 Kicks I can handle. The penalty part drives me nuts. 1.2045 0.04891 88 72 14 2
1646 Your son cannot claim that you completely impede his goals. 1.2045 0.04617 88 71 16 1
1647 …right now, for instance, I feel so…targeted. 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
1648 I feel like I'm preventing people from achieving their goals. 1.2045 0.04325 88 70 18 0
1649 For an hour and a half, all I do is stand here. But if we lose, somehow it's all my fault. 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
1650 You tell me, Doc. Are goals good or are goals bad? 1.2043 0.05418 93 79 9 5
1651 And they have no faces 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
1652 I guess I don't really deal with one on one confrontation well. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
1653 Nobody acknowledges my goals. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
1654 I feel like there’s just too much coming at me these days 1.2043 0.04473 93 75 17 1
1655 You said it would help, doc, but I'm not seeing the net benefit. 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
1656 Do you have a prescription doc, to block the bad things life throws my way 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
1657 Soccer seems to take up all of my time nowadays. 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
1658 Have a safety net, they said… 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
1659 So by blocking the ball I'm really denying myself? 1.2031 0.05069 64 51 13 0
1660 I need help again with "off sides" 1.2031 0.05968 64 53 9 2
1661 He said this is going to go right over my head 1.2031 0.05968 64 53 9 2
1662 Football, soccer...? I'm so confused. 1.2031 0.05968 64 53 9 2
1663 I’m in no rush to get to the point. 1.2031 0.05537 64 52 11 1
1664 Feelings are always getting in the way. 1.2031 0.05537 64 52 11 1
1665 I can see it, but it’s just out of reach 1.2031 0.06748 64 55 5 4
1666 It's always head games with him. 1.2029 0.06047 69 58 8 3
1667 What do you mean, “your goal”? 1.2029 0.05684 69 57 10 2
1668 What do you mean exactly by 'kicks'? 1.2029 0.05296 69 56 12 1
1669 I can't stop putting up barriers.... 1.2029 0.04877 69 55 14 0
1670 Sometimes I feel caged in. 1.2029 0.05684 69 57 10 2
1671 Your interpretation of my dream has changed soccer forever.” 1.2029 0.05296 69 56 12 1
1672 I just see my mom, every time, lining up on these penalty kicks. 1.2029 0.04877 69 55 14 0
1673 It's not just that the Brazilians score against me. It's that they look so good doing it. 1.2029 0.05684 69 57 10 2
1674 So you mean it's just a mental block? 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
1675 My past, present and future, all Messi 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
1676 How can I go on?. He's a "10" And I'm only a "7" 1.2027 0.04705 74 59 15 0
1677 It's highly insensitive of you to ask me about my goals. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
1678 No, the full hour. They're just fans. They're used to being screwed. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
1679 I feel like I'm getting in the way of goals. 1.2027 0.04705 74 59 15 0
1680 And then it deflated... 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
1681 In my dream my arm can touch the crossbar 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
1682 It's exhausting – the stress! I can't be there for every one all the time. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
1683 What exactly is it that I’m saving? The illusion of a father’s love? 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
1684 Mind Games! 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
1685 People are always taking shots at me and it's really affected my self confidence 1.2025 0.05215 79 65 12 2
1686 So yes, I continue to have that dream where I’m at the World Cup in Qatar and I keep trying to get a Budlight. 1.2025 0.05804 79 67 8 4
1687 What do you mean by “goal”? 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
1688 I've never been able to trust my intuition. 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
1689 Being the only one who can hold the ball with his hands, it just gives me a rush of power. 1.2025 0.04550 79 63 16 0
1690 I’m a massive cunt 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
1691 I'm afraid he knows about my fear of commitment. 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
1692 That’s not the kind of goal I had in mind. 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
1693 In situations like this I just don’t know which way to turn. 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
1694 I feel like I need to admit that I don't understand stoppage time. 1.2025 0.04550 79 63 16 0
1695 I just can't commit. Left, right, left, right. It's a no win situation. 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
1696 I just don't have any goals in my life. 1.2025 0.05215 79 65 12 2
1697 Within the grand scheme of things, does it really matter if one little ball occasionally gets through? 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
1698 I never feel like I can really let my guard down, you know? 1.2025 0.05215 79 65 12 2
1699 You ever feel like people just take shots at you all the time? 1.2025 0.05215 79 65 12 2
1700 I just never wanted to see it go in. I always wanted to keep it out. It think that’s why I became a goalie. 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
1701 Just for once I’d like to know what it feels like to score a goal. 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
1702 A legitimate Individual Education Plan (IEP) for a soccer goalie during a penalty kick. 1.2024 0.05297 84 70 11 3
1703 But I don't WANT to overcome my defense mechanisms! 1.2024 0.05297 84 70 11 3
1704 But is a ball always just a ball? 1.2024 0.05561 84 71 9 4
1705 Can you stay? I’m very worried about what’s coming. 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
1706 I remember feeling ambivalent as a child... 1.2024 0.04724 84 68 15 1
1707 It doesn't feel worth saving when I'm always being misled 1.2022 0.04842 89 73 14 2
1708 It’s all futile anyway, right? Sooner or later they’re going to score. I feel the net tightening around me but I’m still vulnerable. 1.2022 0.05099 89 74 12 3
1709 If he scores on me they’ll take away my Rolls Royce. 1.2022 0.05099 89 74 12 3
1710 You're the one who told me to relax more in the box! 1.2022 0.04842 89 73 14 2
1711 Goals have been zooming past me my entire life. 1.2022 0.04842 89 73 14 2
1712 But a tie would be so much more Schrodinger. 1.2021 0.05147 94 79 11 4
1713 I don’t even know what’s left and right anymore. 1.2021 0.05147 94 79 11 4
1714 I feel like everyone's avoiding me. 1.2021 0.04682 94 77 15 2
1715 I feel like these goals were imposed on me 1.2021 0.04682 94 77 15 2
1716 It wasn’t my fault! 1.2020 0.04536 99 81 16 2
1717 With your help I've conquered my anxiety attacks, but I'm still absolutely clueless as to where he's going to kick the ball. 1.2020 0.04536 99 81 16 2
1718 I'm worried my goal is set too high. 1.2020 0.04969 99 83 12 4
1719 Maybe this isn’t the time to quiet quit. 1.2000 0.05883 65 54 9 2
1720 Thanks for fitting me in. 1.2000 0.05610 70 58 10 2
1721 We keep talking until I can't deflect another question. 1.2000 0.04839 80 65 14 1
1722 And then when she tells me her mother's coming to town, and I fall to the ground and roll around, she accuses me of being dramatic." 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
1723 Penalty kick, really? It wasn't a dive, just a Freudian slip. 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
1724 What do you think is getting in the way of a breakthrough? 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
1725 If he looks right, do I dive left? 1.2000 0.06279 65 55 7 3
1726 I have always questioned why they call the beautiful game. 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
1727 I mean, how can I save anything when I can't even save myself? 1.2000 0.05239 85 71 11 3
1728 Life is like soccer, without goals we have nothing! 1.2000 0.05967 70 59 8 3
1729 I feel I'm blocking other people's dreams and goals 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
1730 That’s when I realized that “You’re a keeper” wasn’t meant to be literal. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
1731 Do you think our little chat will make him hit the crossbar? 1.2000 0.04674 85 69 15 1
1732 Kick all you want we’re just going to close the gate. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
1733 I have serious guilt issues with standing in the way of another's attempt to heal from a 'penalty'. And I hate my mother. 1.2000 0.04965 85 70 13 2
1734 Shoot it to me straight. 1.2000 0.04965 85 70 13 2
1735 I'm afraid of a Freudian slip. 1.2000 0.06638 60 51 6 3
1736 I feel like I’m trapped in a net, denying other people’s goals. 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
1737 No team member listens to me in our huddles, that’s why we are at the bottom of our division! 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
1738 I called time-out because I need some stress relief caused by the political considerations attending this penalty Kick" 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
1739 But if I block it, doesn't that keep him from his goals? 1.2000 0.04965 85 70 13 2
1740 Every time this happens, I feel like I am being held responsible for someone else’s mistake. 1.2000 0.04965 85 70 13 2
1741 I feel guilty when we win because being defensive is my superpower. 1.2000 0.04495 100 82 16 2
1742 Everyone always takes cheap shots at me. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
1743 I think it all started when they changed the name of the stadium to the Oedipus Complex 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
1744 Why do I always dive the wrong way in my dreams? 1.2000 0.05610 70 58 10 2
1745 Should I go right, left or stay in the middle? 1.2000 0.04364 85 68 17 0
1746 I keep wondering if this is soccer or football. 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
1747 Stop talking about your goals, it's time for a penalty shot! 1.2000 0.04364 85 68 17 0
1748 It's the same dream, I wake up and the box is gone. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
1749 It's like, every problem at work ends up on me. 1.2000 0.06279 65 55 7 3
1750 I can't decide if it's Football or Soccer. 1.2000 0.05610 70 58 10 2
1751 Thanks for seeing me before 63,282 others. 1.2000 0.05610 70 58 10 2
1752 So I guess what I’m asking is, am I blocking the ball, or is the ball blocking me? 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
1753 'Thanks for taking a field call.' 1.2000 0.05737 80 68 8 4
1754 The left side of my brain says dive right, but my right side is indecisive. Why am I so conflicted? 1.2000 0.04495 100 82 16 2
1755 The only way to reach my goals is not to have goals in the first place. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
1756 I'm having terrible time trying to sleep at night Doctor. I keep hearing this voice screaming Scoooooooooore!!! 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
1757 Just once I want to know what it feels like to kick the ball at someone instead of always having balls kicked at me. 1.2000 0.05000 65 52 13 0
1758 I feel my life is without any goal 1.2000 0.05460 65 53 11 1
1759 There are some things, Doctor, that you will never understand. 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
1760 My mother says I should be more goal-oriented 1.2000 0.04839 80 65 14 1
1761 People are dressing up to look like me and then kicking a ball into my net. 1.2000 0.05460 65 53 11 1
1762 Didn't you hear that whistle!? Hellooo, time out is over. 1.2000 0.04500 80 64 16 0
1763 I jut can't seem to reach my goals. 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
1764 Of course I block my emotions! Blocking is what I do! 1.2000 0.04815 70 56 14 0
1765 How does your decision to dive left make you feel? 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
1766 Am I being paranoid? I feel everyone is trying to get something by me. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
1767 Can you show me one man who achieved all his goals? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
1768 I just don’t know why I felt the need to choose a profession where my sole objective is to stop others success. 1.2000 0.05000 65 52 13 0
1769 If only I’d listened to the guy in row 112s screams and gone left, not right.. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
1770 …and then I wake up… 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
1771 I'm confused, Doc. Is it soccer or football 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
1772 Am I playing football or is football playing me..? 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
1773 How can I be open, when I’m always being put in a box. 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
1774 - Everyone’s having a ball but me. Do you think I might be self penalizing? 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
1775 Work pressure has been high lately. Ten coworkers but they expect me to save the situation. 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
1776 You know I know and I know you know EVERYONE is trying to make me look bad! 1.1977 0.04625 86 70 15 1
1777 I jus wanna kiik the ball, does that make me a bad person? 1.1977 0.04912 86 71 13 2
1778 This guy just keeps trying to hit on me. And I don't like it! 1.1977 0.04625 86 70 15 1
1779 I’m feeling very defensive lately. 1.1977 0.04625 86 70 15 1
1780 Can I get a discount with a 5-minute session? 1.1977 0.04625 86 70 15 1
1781 The way I see it, either way I jump, I'm going to fail. But if I don't ever jump... 1.1977 0.05183 86 72 11 3
1782 I feel like everyone is constantly coming for me. 1.1977 0.04625 86 70 15 1
1783 I know I'd be happier if I weren't standing in the way of other people's goals 1.1977 0.05183 86 72 11 3
1784 People are always telling me that I stand in the way of their success and, well, I just don’t see it, Doc. 1.1977 0.05183 86 72 11 3
1785 Who am I to stop others from reaching their goals? 1.1975 0.05392 81 68 10 3
1786 I need to get past this "target of disaffection" obsession. 1.1975 0.05392 81 68 10 3
1787 I'm just so sick of the fans acting like I'm faking an existential crisis at pivotal moments in the match to gain a competitive advantage from the referee. 1.1975 0.04785 81 66 14 1
1788 Defensive!? He calls me defensive? Like he doesn't give me reasons to be defensive?" 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
1789 I don’t see any way to achieve my goal 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
1790 Mental preparation is my goal. 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
1791 What do you mean, 1 extra time minute? We're making a breakthrough. 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
1792 It's like they kick at me when I'm already down, and I just don't know what to do with that. 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
1793 This therapist is a keeper! 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
1794 You’re great but I wanted the goal to “Shrink” 1.1975 0.05392 81 68 10 3
1795 We need to dial back the transparency, emotional availability, equity milestones we’ve achieved…at least until we beat Cameroon. 1.1974 0.04596 76 61 15 0
1796 I have this recurring nightmare that I’m holding up the game and everyone is watching. 1.1974 0.05305 76 63 11 2
1797 #MillenialGoalkeeper 1.1974 0.05929 76 65 7 4
1798 I feel that the failure to block a goal is a rejection of my team's love. 1.1974 0.04963 76 62 13 1
1799 I can’t take it anymore, they keep kicking me in the balls! 1.1974 0.05626 76 64 9 3
1800 Become a dentist! That’s all I heard growing up… 1.1974 0.04596 76 61 15 0
1801 Looks like we need to concentrate on your short-term goals. 1.1974 0.04963 76 62 13 1
1802 I keep getting these messy dreams 1.1974 0.05305 76 63 11 2
1803 Doc, I just don't seem to be able to keep as many balls in the air as I used to. 1.1974 0.04596 76 61 15 0
1804 I feel like people are always Messi with me... 1.1974 0.04963 76 62 13 1
1805 It seems that I'm always being attacked". 1.1974 0.05305 76 63 11 2
1806 I don't really even like being the center of attention. 1.1974 0.05626 76 64 9 3
1807 So you think punching the ball is just a defense mechanism? 1.1974 0.04963 76 62 13 1
1808 No way you can say this relates to sex doc ! 1.1972 0.04755 71 57 14 0
1809 But "10" is supposed to be MY lucky number !!! 1.1972 0.05161 71 58 12 1
1810 But what if they really are just paying to see me? 1.1972 0.05161 71 58 12 1
1811 Once again, how is this my fault? 1.1972 0.05161 71 58 12 1
1812 Two things. You did nothing wrong to deserve this and I would dive right. 1.1972 0.05890 71 60 8 3
1813 This is only my first yellow card, and the analysis is doing wonders for my shot blocking. 1.1972 0.05537 71 59 10 2
1814 I lack ambition, no goals. That's a good thing, right? 1.1972 0.05537 71 59 10 2
1815 It was this or they were going to get rid of the locker room vending machine… 1.1972 0.04755 71 57 14 0
1816 But I'm supposed to be defensive, doc. 1.1970 0.05385 66 54 11 1
1817 Same dream......the ball is coming right at me, and I freeze! 1.1970 0.05802 66 55 9 2
1818 I feel like I'm always standing in the way of someone else's goal... 1.1970 0.05385 66 54 11 1
1819 Goals? None, I hope. 1.1970 0.05802 66 55 9 2
1820 But then my mother tells me my first instinct is always wrong. 1.1970 0.04933 66 53 13 0
1821 So you’re saying sometimes a ball is just a ball? 1.1970 0.06556 66 57 5 4
1822 Why a shot? Why not a pill? 1.1967 0.05639 61 50 10 1
1823 The coach is paying you to analyze my blocks? 1.1967 0.05639 61 50 10 1
1824 I have a fear of round objects...hitting me in the face. 1.1967 0.05132 61 49 12 0
1825 I don't know what it is doc., but it feels like people are always taking shots at me. 1.1967 0.05132 61 49 12 0
1826 Ok, I get it - you're trying to psych me out. 1.1967 0.05639 61 50 10 1
1827 Deep down I'd rather be catching people. 1.1957 0.05182 92 78 10 4
1828 …so you can see I have a prosthetic left leg….. 1.1957 0.05182 92 78 10 4
1829 You're still blocking." 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
1830 And when I woke up I was screaming; 'butterfingers, butterfingers!' 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
1831 They say ‘just guess, it’s 50/50’ but I’ve worked so hard. There has to be more. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
1832 Every time I set myself a goal, I just never end up keeping it. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
1833 I just want to start with a clean sheet.” 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
1834 I got laid off, my wife ran off with my best friend, my dog was run over, my car was stolen, my house burned down, my 401K tanked, my medical tests are all positive, and I was indicted for insider trading. But here’s the kicker. 1.1954 0.05626 87 75 7 5
1835 I'm only happy when I prevent people from accomplishing their goals 1.1951 0.05041 82 68 12 2
1836 But the last time I “just let it go” everyone got so angry. 1.1951 0.04403 82 66 16 0
1837 To save ot not to save. That is the question. 1.1951 0.05041 82 68 12 2
1838 Time’s up. Let’s save this one for next time. 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
1839 I just can’t seem to step back and look at the big picture goal 1.1951 0.05041 82 68 12 2
1840 And when he does that, I get all defensive… 1.1951 0.05607 82 70 8 4
1841 I hate to sound paranoid, but I think they really are out to get me. 1.1951 0.05331 82 69 10 3
1842 Goals? I don't make them. 1.1948 0.05558 77 65 9 3
1843 Every direction is just wrong! 1.1948 0.04905 77 63 13 1
1844 It’s a mental block. 1.1948 0.04905 77 63 13 1
1845 I keep having this dream that I'm a famous goalie for a famous team in a famous country but my mother keeps screaming from the stands "You should 'a been a doctor" 1.1948 0.05857 77 66 7 4
1846 Frankly, I struggle with goals. 1.1948 0.05558 77 65 9 3
1847 ..and I block the kick! We Win! It is Not a dream! 1.1948 0.05242 77 64 11 2
1848 I feel the need to save everyone. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
1849 If you would just shrink the goal, this conversation would be unnecessary. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
1850 I realize goals are important, but are they really worth all this kicking and screaming about? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
1851 So, you feel that you are actually supposed to be blocking. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
1852 I’m just not connecting with the ball in this heat… 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
1853 I think my phobia started with my Lionel train set derailing. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
1854 I always feel like all eyes are on me. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
1855 Our time may be up, but I'm not allowed to move until he kicks it. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
1856 'I'm feeling increasingly territorial of my space" 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
1857 So you see doc, I’ve always felt mine were too small. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
1858 Yeah, year, he's going to need all the therapy he can get after I make this kick. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
1859 I feel everything depends on me 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
1860 Today, I'd like to talk about my goals! 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
1861 I just feel like everyone else is so selfish. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
1862 In retrospect, the first half feels somehow meaningless. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
1863 Maybe it’s just me doc, but I could never eat pineapple on pizza. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
1864 What I need are some real goals in life." 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
1865 I just hate having to choose sides with him 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
1866 They will add time. He’s just faking it. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
1867 ...but I always wanted to be a hockey goalie. 1.1940 0.04868 67 54 13 0
1868 I don’t know doc. I just feel personally attacked. 1.1940 0.05722 67 56 9 2
1869 I just feel like everyone's achieving goals but me. 1.1940 0.05312 67 55 11 1
1870 I know you traveling shrinks have a tight schedule, but really!! 1.1940 0.05312 67 55 11 1
1871 I thought these World Cup games would move a little faster than this. 1.1940 0.04868 67 54 13 0
1872 The goalie was told he was blocked by his friendly shrink and he thought that was a good thing. 1.1940 0.04868 67 54 13 0
1873 I just feel like life is kicking balls my way and I don’t know how to catch them 1.1940 0.04868 67 54 13 0
1874 So this is why I am terrified of flopping. 1.1940 0.04868 67 54 13 0
1875 I just don't get it. The trophy should be a cup. 1.1940 0.05312 67 55 11 1
1876 Is it the ball I’m trying to catch, or my father’s love? 1.1940 0.06104 67 57 7 3
1877 I understand a line has to be drawn, but why am I always on the wrong side of it? 1.1935 0.05557 62 51 10 1
1878 Doc, I need direction. Right or left? 1.1935 0.05557 62 51 10 1
1879 Everyone calls me goalie, but no one ask what my goals are. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
1880 It just doesn't seem right that no one else gets to use their hands. 1.1935 0.05557 62 51 10 1
1881 Imagine my adolescence. Never being able to score. I had change my goals. 1.1935 0.05557 62 51 10 1
1882 Not only do I self-sabotage, I also try to prevent others from achieving their goals. 1.1935 0.05130 93 79 10 4
1883 I believe balls should be free to fly into nets if that is their desire. 1.1935 0.05557 62 51 10 1
1884 My life is just such a Messi 1.1935 0.06014 62 52 8 2
1885 Just can't make my mind up to go left or right. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
1886 I have this recurring dream.... 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
1887 I just feel like I'm stopping others from reaching their goals, while not making any of my own. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
1888 He couldn’t hit the side of a barn 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
1889 But what’s the point? 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
1890 I’m not defensive. 1.1930 0.06352 57 48 7 2
1891 I pay you five hundred dollars an hour to tell me I'm blocking? 1.1930 0.05274 57 46 11 0
1892 Everyone seems to think I'm standing between them and their goals. 1.1930 0.05274 57 46 11 0
1893 Denial. 1.1930 0.05274 57 46 11 0
1894 I need to find a goal in life. 1.1928 0.04985 83 69 12 2
1895 Doc, I feel like I may be heading for trouble. 1.1928 0.04681 83 68 14 1
1896 It's just not fair. Strikers get all the credit. They score a winning goal and women want to have their children! I miss a penalty save and the fans want my scalp! 1.1928 0.04681 83 68 14 1
1897 I feel like it's finally time to let my defenses down. 1.1928 0.04985 83 69 12 2
1898 It's hard to let go. 1.1928 0.04681 83 68 14 1
1899 Whatever the result, your mother will always love you. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1900 So if I don’t stop his shot I worry about the social media reaction. 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1901 I really want to connect with my goals. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1902 I'm very goal-oriented and I'm usually able to keep my eye on the ball, but sometimes I feel like I'm just not going anywhere. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1903 I feel like my popularity is slipping away through my fingers. 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1904 Everyone but me gets a shot at their goal. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1905 Left? Right? Left? Right? I can't take it anymore. It's worse than the election. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1906 We usually fake physical injuries. Why do you suppose that is? 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1907 Sometimes to reach our goals, we have to let other people make theirs. 1.1923 0.04491 78 63 15 0
1908 Ever since I was a child, I've had this tendency to block things out. 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1909 She might've been a keeper, but she wasn't very goal-oriented. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1910 This really isn’t what I thought ‘Ted Lasso’ was going to be about. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1911 I’d be a lot less anxious if he moved back 20 yards. 1.1923 0.04491 78 63 15 0
1912 The stress at work is relentless and none of my co-workers ever jump in to help. 1.1919 0.04906 99 84 11 4
1913 Penalty shots give me angst. 1.1918 0.04640 73 59 14 0
1914 The Goalie’s Anxiety at the Penalty Kick”, 1970 novel by Peter Handk 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
1915 I am in a foul mood doc. 1.1918 0.04640 73 59 14 0
1916 I just can’t move forward. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
1917 I think I'm blocking others, rather than seeking my own goals 1.1918 0.04640 73 59 14 0
1918 I think deep inside I want to miss. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
1919 Penalty kicks are a recurring nightmare. 1.1918 0.04640 73 59 14 0
1920 My goals have changed. 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
1921 Soccer goalkeepers probably have a better save percentage than do psychiatrists. 1.1918 0.04640 73 59 14 0
1922 So this is the way you get your kicks? 1.1918 0.04640 73 59 14 0
1923 Look, Doc, I could talk to you about this all day, but then it would just be added to injury time. 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
1924 Think of it as a goal not worth pursuing. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
1925 I'm an outcast, all my friends are hands free. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
1926 I'm tired of being so goal-oriented. 1.1918 0.04640 73 59 14 0
1927 I really need to get my arms around it. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
1928 I feel like I won't meet the expectations that people have of me, it's really detrimental to my mental health." 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
1929 I always feel like I’m the only one able to actually handle the situation… 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
1930 I’m sorry, but I don’t feel any closer to my inner child 1.1918 0.04640 73 59 14 0
1931 It’s so unhealthy, to succeed I have to keep him from scoring on me, when that’s all I really want. 1.1915 0.04607 94 78 14 2
1932 People tell me I should have goals and I'm like, No, actually, I should not. 1.1915 0.04849 94 79 12 3
1933 I accept it. I like being watched 1.1915 0.04607 94 78 14 2
1934 I feel like everyone’s always looking at me. 1.1912 0.06021 68 58 7 3
1935 If I go left, I am acknowledging my father's anger. Go right, and it's my mom's apathy. 1.1912 0.06021 68 58 7 3
1936 How could I have missed that shot. It was straight as a cigar. 1.1912 0.05241 68 56 11 1
1937 The guilt is killing me; I can use my hands all I want. 1.1912 0.05241 68 56 11 1
1938 I keep having this nightmare about running for 45 minutes and getting nowhere. 1.1912 0.05241 68 56 11 1
1939 I can't decide if I am playing football or soccer. 1.1912 0.05241 68 56 11 1
1940 I feel bad for blocking the goal. It's all my fault they cannot score. 1.1912 0.05644 68 57 9 2
1941 Why am I so compelled to block the goals of my fellow man? It must stem from my childhood. 1.1912 0.05644 68 57 9 2
1942 I mean they call THIS soccer!? We are the ones who actually play with our feet!! 1.1912 0.06021 68 58 7 3
1943 When did you start having these World Cup nightmares? 1.1910 0.04485 89 73 15 1
1944 Obviously, you've had too many goals in your life. 1.1910 0.04485 89 73 15 1
1945 If a tie equates to kissing your sister,am I wrong for thinking I should let him score? 1.1910 0.04485 89 73 15 1
1946 The other team hates me. 1.1910 0.04485 89 73 15 1
1947 ‘Ole ole’ makes me feel like dancing. 1.1910 0.05022 89 75 11 3
1948 I understand how important goals are. 1.1905 0.04931 84 70 12 2
1949 Doc, I have a mental block about blocking the ball. 1.1905 0.05925 63 53 8 2
1950 I feel like everyone out here is trying to decieve me. 1.1905 0.05925 63 53 8 2
1951 I’ve got this incredible urge to move the goalpost 1.1905 0.04631 84 69 14 1
1952 But I really meant to say pitch. 1.1905 0.05476 63 52 10 1
1953 It’s like everyone looks right past me 1.1905 0.04931 84 70 12 2
1954 I have this recurring nightmare that someone is kicking a ball in my face. 1.1905 0.04931 84 70 12 2
1955 I want to act boldly but feel truly ready first. 1.1905 0.04631 84 69 14 1
1956 I feel like things keep hurtling towards me and I don't know how to stop them. 1.1905 0.05214 84 71 10 3
1957 All my life it’s been soccer!?! 1.1905 0.04631 84 69 14 1
1958 I have a recurring nightmare that I’m an insurance agent. 1.1905 0.05476 63 52 10 1
1959 No offense, Doc, but what I really need right now is a Psychic! 1.1900 0.04426 100 83 15 2
1960 What does ‘head case’ even mean? 1.1899 0.04441 79 64 15 0
1961 Sometimes I don't know way I should go, Doc. Sometimes I do, sort of, but usually I don't, you know ? 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
1962 I feel like I'm standing in the way of my goals. 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
1963 I'm conflicted Doctor, is the penalty on me or him? 1.1899 0.05428 79 67 9 3
1964 It's this recurring dream. I'm supposed to play, but am stuck on a couch and cannot stop speaking with a psychotherapist. 1.1899 0.05719 79 68 7 4
1965 Common Keeper, your delaying tactic is way offside! 1.1899 0.05428 79 67 9 3
1966 Yes, having realistic goals is the key to happiness 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
1967 Sometimes I feel like I’m just one big defense mechanism. 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
1968 I always get too defensive. 1.1899 0.05428 79 67 9 3
1969 So what is my goal in life? 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
1970 I just always feel like people are trying to get things past me, but I'm stuck here. 1.1899 0.04441 79 64 15 0
1971 I'm tired of being the only one with the helping hand. 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
1972 Turns out... having no goals in life does not make one a good goalie. 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
1973 Is it really a "friendly" if they shoot at me? 1.1899 0.05120 79 66 11 2
1974 I wake up in the middle of the night hearing Goaaaaal! Please make it stop. 1.1899 0.05120 79 66 11 2
1975 I keep getting in the way of my goals. 1.1897 0.05746 58 48 9 1
1976 I just feel like I’m dropping the ball lately. 1.1897 0.05193 58 47 11 0
1977 When exactly did you decide that you wanted to play goalie for the Iranian National Team? 1.1897 0.05193 58 47 11 0
1978 I feel like it might be time for me to lower my defenses. 1.1897 0.05193 58 47 11 0
1979 I’m protecting the net, but who’s protecting me? 1.1897 0.05746 58 48 9 1
1980 ‘ Even with one leg I still hope to make the team’ 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
1981 I'm really trying to become less goal-oriented 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
1982 Who am I to stand in the way of a man's goals? 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
1983 Just the opposite....too many goals is my problem. 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
1984 I feel like nobody backs me up . . . 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
1985 No, my mother was a center forward. My father was the sweeper. 1.1892 0.05667 74 63 8 3
1986 ... you know, Handke actually never met Milosevic, however... 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
1987 When is someone going to save ME? 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
1988 Does he have to yell goooooooal every time? 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
1989 I think I often block things out as a defense mechanism. 1.1884 0.04742 69 56 13 0
1990 What I really need help with is goal *setting*. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
1991 My life is just one big Messi. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
1992 I got nothin'. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
1993 If you stay long enough, the game will be over 1.1884 0.04742 69 56 13 0
1994 My ego wants me to block shots but my superego gets in the way. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
1995 Hasn’t been the same since they added a life coach to the payroll. 1.1884 0.04742 69 56 13 0
1996 I Keep dreaming about being a butterfly. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
1997 I keep getting the feeling that I’m being watched. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
1998 Well, yes, I have been keeping others from pursuing their goals, but no, I can't say I feel all that bad about it. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
1999 It just feels like they’re always trying to avoid me. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
2000 He is MESSI-ng with my mind. 1.1884 0.05939 69 59 7 3
2001 Doc, I need help figuring out my goals. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
2002 I’d like to extend this session. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
2003 It just feels like my father’s goal, not my goal 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
2004 I can't decide whether I should dive left or right. 1.1882 0.04265 85 69 16 0
2005 I was told that this was the best position for my martyr complex. 1.1882 0.05674 85 74 6 5
2006 I can’t get past this… 1.1881 0.04386 101 84 15 2
2007 As a teenager, I was never able to score. 1.1875 0.05398 64 53 10 1
2008 ...and as I am about to block the ball, it says to me: So, why haven't you called? It's been two weeks. I thought you were dead. But don't worry about me. I'll just worry myself to death. Who am I anyway? Just your mother. 1.1875 0.05652 80 69 7 4
2009 My life has no goal. 1.1875 0.04738 80 66 13 1
2010 I just wanted a beer. 1.1875 0.05061 80 67 11 2
2011 I'm just stuck in a box. 1.1875 0.04738 80 66 13 1
2012 Not only do I feel confined,it’s like half the world is rooting for me to fail. 1.1875 0.05398 64 53 10 1
2013 I'm just not sure now is the right time to be less defensive. 1.1875 0.05840 64 54 8 2
2014 It's like I'm not even here. 1.1875 0.05840 64 54 8 2
2015 I just can't shake the feeling that someone is trying to hurt me. 1.1875 0.04391 80 65 15 0
2016 The no-score draw used to be my go-to fantasy. But in the real game it feels so lame. 1.1875 0.05364 80 68 9 3
2017 My ID say left, but my EGO leans right? 1.1875 0.04738 80 66 13 1
2018 If the goalie can’t handle the pressure he should play pickle ball” 1.1875 0.05398 64 53 10 1
2019 My mother? She would shoot for the top left. Why do you ask? 1.1875 0.05840 64 54 8 2
2020 I’m afraid you will move the couch to one side then he can make an easy goal. 1.1875 0.05398 64 53 10 1
2021 the word ‘nil’ haunts me. 1.1875 0.06250 64 55 6 3
2022 I dream of two balls at once 1.1875 0.05061 80 67 11 2
2023 Between you, me and the goal post, I always plan a dramatic fall for the penalties. 1.1875 0.04738 80 66 13 1
2024 I know it's a technically Doc, but Injury Time can be used for both physical "AND" mental issues. 1.1875 0.04738 80 66 13 1
2025 Since I've read "The Goalie's Anxiety at the Penalty Kick", it's just not the same... 1.1875 0.04738 80 66 13 1
2026 Why would fake a foul? I just feel there's no trust between us anymore. 1.1875 0.04756 96 81 12 3
2027 I dream that I will die from a severe blow to the head! 1.1868 0.04396 91 75 15 1
2028 It’s just all above my head. 1.1868 0.04665 91 76 13 2
2029 I feel useless at work Doc, everyone else runs around kicking the ball , Me I do Nothing 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
2030 If I block the kick, half the people hate me. If I let it go, the other half hate me. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
2031 Why's everybody always kicking on me? 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
2032 He always goes for the upper left corner. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
2033 Could you find me some ways to deflect serious trauma 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
2034 I just feel like I'm trapped in a series of boxes. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
2035 Thank you doctor!!! I finally am ok that other people can have their goals too”! 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
2036 You can tell him that we just got started and he'll just have to wait another 49 minutes. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
2037 I have this irrational fear of important things passing me by. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
2038 I'm afraid we've come to the end of our session...but there will be seven minutes of extra time. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
2039 When it comes to your id and ego, it seems like you're offsides. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
2040 Ultimately, I am the Goal 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
2041 It was a 'knee moment' in my career, but all everyone cared about was politics!! 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
2042 I feel ashamed when other people achieve their goals. 1.1864 0.05114 59 48 11 0
2043 I feel I’m preventing everyone from achieving their goals. 1.1863 0.04564 102 86 13 3
2044 So, I was thinking, my passion for lunging at ... well, maybe I'm not cis gender after all. 1.1860 0.04533 86 71 14 1
2045 I’ve unconsciously suppressed the ability of feeling psyched up. 1.1860 0.05363 86 74 8 4
2046 My whole existence is denial of other people’s goals. Stop this. Stop that. Don’t let anything get past you. Never something positive. None of my wants and needs matter. And nothing was ever good enough for my father. Always . . . . 1.1860 0.04826 86 72 12 2
2047 I had a dream I was playing football 1.1857 0.05105 70 58 11 1
2048 Every four years I have nightmares that keep repeating best out of five. Help me doc. 1.1857 0.04682 70 57 13 0
2049 If I could just figure out which way! 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
2050 I’m NOT blocking! 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
2051 This was not how our last referee did things…. 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
2052 ...by 'Running Out the Clock' I've gained deep insight into 'Game Over'..." 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
2053 I hate this bullshit where Americans pretend to give a fuck about soccer for a week. 1.1857 0.05860 70 60 7 3
2054 The problem is that I'm basically a conflict avoider. 1.1857 0.05105 70 58 11 1
2055 I have a terrific safety net and I still can't sleep at night. 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
2056 And that's when I found out, if i was stationed at Camp LeJeune between 1953 and 1988 I could be owed significant compensation.... 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
2057 This new video assist referee is really bringing up some parental issues. 1.1857 0.04682 70 57 13 0
2058 Again, what is the goal of this? 1.1857 0.05105 70 58 11 1
2059 Hey! Let's not overthink this! 1.1857 0.05105 70 58 11 1
2060 My Mom always said that Annette was a keeper..... 1.1857 0.05860 70 60 7 3
2061 There’s just a lot being thrown at me lately 1.1857 0.05105 70 58 11 1
2062 The penalty is always on someone else, but I'm the one they shoot at! 1.1857 0.05105 70 58 11 1
2063 I know you said not to block my feelings, but I can't help it with my job 1.1857 0.05105 70 58 11 1
2064 ...but it just feels like I'm always the one actually being penalized. 1.1856 0.04476 97 81 14 2
2065 I just feel like everyone is watching me. 1.1852 0.04685 81 67 13 1
2066 So, why do you think you keep seeing Pele in your dreams? 1.1852 0.05303 81 69 9 3
2067 When I feel attacked,my natural instinct is to get defensive. 1.1852 0.05303 81 69 9 3
2068 I'm going through a Messi divorce 1.1852 0.05586 81 70 7 4
2069 I am pathologically indecisive. Should I dive to the right or to the left? 1.1852 0.05003 81 68 11 2
2070 +60 stoppage time, charged double for travel. 1.1852 0.04685 81 67 13 1
2071 I keep doing the same thing but expect a different result... Is that so crazy? 1.1852 0.04685 81 67 13 1
2072 Doc, can you explain to me why I always end up here. I'm an NFL referee 1.1852 0.05586 81 70 7 4
2073 So sports psychology really is a thing? 1.1852 0.04685 81 67 13 1
2074 Penalty kicks are totally head games. 1.1852 0.05303 81 69 9 3
2075 Number 10 waiting to Freudian slip it into the net 1.1852 0.06515 54 46 6 2
2076 I'm the coach, how could I possibly be in the way of my team's success? 1.1852 0.04343 81 66 15 0
2077 I'm willing to let my guard down and be vulnerable within established boundaries. 1.1848 0.04619 92 77 13 2
2078 I mean, can you believe FIFA did that? 1.1848 0.04069 92 75 17 0
2079 And what are your most important goals? 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
2080 I have no goals and, quite honestly, don’t want to have any. 1.1846 0.04850 65 53 12 0
2081 So you’re saying my Messiah Complex is a plus? 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
2082 If everyone could use their hands, I wouldn't feel so guilty. 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
2083 The goalie needs some treatment. 1.1846 0.04850 65 53 12 0
2084 Doctor Whacko, you have no idea of the STRESS 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
2085 Suddenly I’m terrified by little UFOs looking like soccer balls coming at me. 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
2086 I’m trying to not be so goal-oriented 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
2087 My team's goals feel impossible to defend. 1.1846 0.05756 65 55 8 2
2088 Doc, I am seriously Messi’d up! 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
2089 I have problems opening up." 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
2090 I block the soccer balls because I'm in love with Annette and I don't want her to get hurt. 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
2091 I dont want to be alone anymore 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
2092 I WANT to be one with the ball.... 1.1842 0.04476 76 62 14 0
2093 Tell them we can resume once I've found myself. 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
2094 So how does that make you feel? 1.1842 0.05528 76 65 8 3
2095 I can tell I'm blocking something out. 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
2096 Everyone's against me. 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
2097 I'll swear my co-workers are trying to avoid me. 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
2098 So what's on HIS mind? 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
2099 I just can't shake the anxiety that you are offsides 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
2100 I feel like I’m being too defensive. 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
2101 Let’s talk about my agoraphobia today 1.1842 0.05528 76 65 8 3
2102 I think it was my mother who caused me to fixate on goals. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2103 I feel like I'm an obstacle to other people's success. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2104 I'm always pushing things away. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2105 Hmmm... "I missed the ball." Now, what does that REALLY mean? 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2106 It all started when my mom began to send me red cards for Christmas." 1.1833 0.05038 60 49 11 0
2107 It turns out that building walls around myself doesn't actually help me stop the ball. 1.1833 0.05570 60 50 9 1
2108 I don’t get it. She says I’m constantly on the defensive! 1.1833 0.06056 60 51 7 2
2109 I feel like people are always trying to score on me 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
2110 I get the feeling people are watching me when I'm at work. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
2111 Sometimes it feels like my whole life is a violation of the offside rule. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
2112 I want to have the thrill of being in the goal box,but I am not sure I can handle the pressure of a win. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
2113 Why don't we save that for next week? 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
2114 A penalty kick leaves me in the self-loathing or self-love position. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
2115 No one ever talks to me about MY goals. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
2116 My dad called it football, but my mother…she always insisted it was “soccer.” 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
2117 I just feel like I have too many balls in the air 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
2118 I feel like people are always attacking my reputation. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
2119 So fair a foul I have not seen! 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
2120 Look, I never touched you and you know it. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
2121 So you reckon this is the best moment to come out? 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
2122 Tell me again, Why shouldn't I take it personally? 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
2123 Everyone should have a chance to make their goals, and my only job is to prevent that. Does that make me a bad person? 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
2124 Just because guys score once in a while doesn't mean I think THEY'RE sleeping with my mother. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
2125 In the grand scheme of things, what really is the significance of goals?! 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
2126 I wish I could just zoom out in high pressure, stressful situations 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
2127 It’s always ‘Save this! Save that!’, when is someone gonna save me? 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
2128 I feel like I put myself in difficult positions. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
2129 I just keep getting the feeling that I’M the target 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
2130 I'm tired of being so goal orientated, day after day. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
2131 I feel like i'm only ever stopping others from reaching their goals 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
2132 I need to get my head in the game. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
2133 I'm finally figuring out that the world doesn't revolve around me and my feelings. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
2134 Everywhere I look there are people kicking balls at me. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
2135 I feel like people put me in a box. 1.1828 0.04310 93 77 15 1
2136 You said goals, I guess I took it literally. 1.1818 0.05461 77 66 8 3
2137 I think my inferiority complex comes from mother telling me that Jesus saves us even if I don't. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
2138 The other team says I'm too defensive." 1.1818 0.04135 88 72 16 0
2139 I dream that I've got the whole world in my hands. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
2140 Up to now I never understood fantasy football. 1.1818 0.05855 55 46 8 1
2141 Doctor, I'm envisioning the ball going above the net, I hope that works! 1.1818 0.04424 77 63 14 0
2142 I don't want to hurt his feelings but what am I, some kind of push-over? 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
2143 All my life I have had to block things out and it seems to be getting worse. 1.1818 0.04784 66 54 12 0
2144 It just isn't fair that I have to stress for someone else's foul. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
2145 I stop others’ goals. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
2146 Waiting for a Breakthrough 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
2147 Mother was always telling me to pursue my dreams and keep my goals. 1.1818 0.04784 66 54 12 0
2148 you can't help him with what he's got to face 1.1818 0.05139 77 65 10 2
2149 I'm always in the way of others reaching their goal. 1.1818 0.04784 66 54 12 0
2150 What if a ball isn’t just a ball? 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
2151 I think that I'm too much in my head when I'm playing. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
2152 I just feel like everyone is out to get me. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
2153 My Mom took my soccer ball away......... 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
2154 I feel like everyone’s out to get me, Doc. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
2155 But they won’t stop kicking those balls at me. 1.1818 0.04622 99 84 12 3
2156 Help me out, Sigmund. Look at him. Will he kick left or right? My left or right? 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
2157 She says its always about me. 1.1818 0.05855 55 46 8 1
2158 Coach told me to work on being defensive. 1.1818 0.05139 77 65 10 2
2159 The Free Association Penalty Kick 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
2160 Everyone’s always telling me to block the ball but nobody asks me about my mental blocks I’ve been working through. 1.1818 0.04152 99 82 16 1
2161 I feel selfish...day in and day out I stop others from reaching their goals." Heidi Roe, Myrtle Point, Oregon 1.1818 0.05461 77 66 8 3
2162 I just don't want to stand it the way of someone achieving their goal. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
2163 It all started kicking a can down the road 1.1818 0.05855 55 46 8 1
2164 I don’t need an intervention, I need knee surgery. 1.1818 0.04424 77 63 14 0
2165 I'm worried that all my life amounts to nothing. 1.1818 0.06072 66 57 6 3
2166 I always get anxious on penalty kicks. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
2167 My mother says I'm too defensive. 1.1818 0.05139 77 65 10 2
2168 Lately you’ve been showing up in my anxiety dreams. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
2169 So what I'm hearing is that there really is NO free in free kick. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
2170 I'm fearful of the 10 to 1 odds. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
2171 I feel they are always picking on me. 1.1818 0.05249 55 45 10 0
2172 I feel a little exposed. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
2173 I'm terrified of shots. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
2174 Then my mother said why don't you stop all the balls from going in 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
2175 I tried the cigar. 1.1818 0.05766 77 67 6 4
2176 I feel like you just want me to keep stalling until your overtime rates kick in." 1.1818 0.04424 77 63 14 0
2177 The Cross bar isn’t literally angry with you 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
2178 But doc if life isn't a spectator sport then why are we a New Yorker cartoon ? 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
2179 I feel like I am being targeted! 1.1809 0.04774 94 80 11 3
2180 So, doc, you're saying it's not a Freudian slip when I dive right when the ball goes left? 1.1807 0.04249 83 68 15 0
2181 It feels like all I do is stop people from their goals... 1.1807 0.04892 83 70 11 2
2182 « I’m done with being defensive. » 1.1807 0.04892 83 70 11 2
2183 The last goal was a Freudian slip. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
2184 … and since I felt that the world was out to get me anyway, I thought I might as well get paid for it, by being a goalie! 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
2185 The Goalie's Anxiety at the Penalty Kick by Peter Handke, A Film by Wim Wenders 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
2186 You have one practice shot and that is it. Then we will play for real. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
2187 We’ve got a 9 goal lead so I’m not that worried about it 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
2188 Sometimes I just feel so put-upon. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
2189 I'm trying to maintain a work/life balance. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
2190 And when did you develop this feeling that everyone is kicking balls at you? 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
2191 I don’t feel I’m achieving my goals in life 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
2192 How will randomly adding seven minutes to our session help unpack all my defensive issues? 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
2193 I feel like I’m always paying for other people’s mistakes. 1.1806 0.04565 72 59 13 0
2194 I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm so defensive. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
2195 ... and I'm in this dead-end job. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
2196 I never liked soccer--my father pressured me into playing. 1.1806 0.04565 72 59 13 0
2197 I got off on the wrong foot. How do I show them I'm a keeper? 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
2198 Well first I didn’t have any goals in life and now I have too many. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
2199 I feel like nobody cares all year and then suddenly the whole world is watching me! 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
2200 My father was a fisherman. 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
2201 …and when he kicked it at me I took it personally. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
2202 I think it comes down to a fear of commitment. 1.1806 0.04565 72 59 13 0
2203 I know I have to live by nil-ilism but sometimes I have real doubts. 1.1803 0.04963 61 50 11 0
2204 I just don't know-should I go left, should I go right, why have I got a dumb ball cap on? 1.1803 0.05486 61 51 9 1
2205 Are the whole world's eyes in the room with us? 1.1803 0.05486 61 51 9 1
2206 But isn't blocking a good thing? 1.1802 0.04087 111 93 16 2
2207 I am white, from Kansas and born in the United States. Why am I here? 1.1798 0.04394 89 74 14 1
2208 What is preventing your from reaching your goals? 1.1798 0.04093 89 73 16 0
2209 I need you put the block we removed BACK IN and fast! 1.1798 0.04941 89 76 10 3
2210 Football is a beautifully mental game 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
2211 Is this what they mean by "stoppage time"? 1.1795 0.04373 78 64 14 0
2212 I’m dreaming, right? 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
2213 It all comes back to mother. She said jump and I’d jump. 1.1795 0.05078 78 66 10 2
2214 Doesn’t your brother wear number 10 on his jersey? 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
2215 Pay them no mind. 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
2216 My job has me constantly on the defensive. 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
2217 I’m up one second, down the next. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
2218 Is it called football or is it called soccer? No one knows and it's driving me crazy. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
2219 I live in constant fear of one word: GOOOOOOOOOOAL! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
2220 You see doc it started when I was a kid 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
2221 I have an irrational fear that doctors will set up a major athletic event around me without my knowledge. What do I do, Doc? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
2222 I'm feeling such anxiety, Dr. Handke 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
2223 I keep having the same dream of getting violently struck by a soccer ball. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
2224 When my parents used to fight and throw things, I was placed safely in a playpen. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
2225 i keep having this recurring dream that Pele is on the other team 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
2226 It all started with Ted Lasso. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
2227 Even Spiderman says I'm nuts, Doc. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
2228 They kick; I block. They kick; I block. I'm starting to worry that I'm an enabler in this relationship. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
2229 My mother always said to pursue my goals. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
2230 « Ah, so you say it’s fine to make mistakes. » 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
2231 It started when I was three and my dad said "Do you want to play soccer?" and I hit my sister. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
2232 How can I not feel guilty if it is called a penalty? 1.1786 0.06297 56 48 6 2
2233 If he tries to kick that ball in here again I'm going to go nuts! 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
2234 This really isn’t helping to desensitize my obsession over life goals. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
2235 The other team gives me anxiety. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
2236 My multiple personalities have never helped me stop shots but having you and a couch here has really improved my net coverage. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
2237 I have always been very no goal oriented " 1.1782 0.04537 101 86 12 3
2238 Yes, doctor. I've been defending aggressive behavior for years. 1.1781 0.05634 73 63 7 3
2239 I need to stop being such a hands-on guy. 1.1781 0.04509 73 60 13 0
2240 So why do you feel like everyone is trying to bypass you? 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
2241 It's more like I'm preventing my goals from happening. 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
2242 I often feel I'm in the way. 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
2243 That's Messi. He can afford to wait. 1.1781 0.05962 73 64 5 4
2244 Ouch, he needed a coach, not a couch. 1.1781 0.05962 73 64 5 4
2245 Why should I be penalized by society for not achieving my goals? 1.1781 0.04509 73 60 13 0
2246 I can't sleep with all that noise. 1.1781 0.05634 73 63 7 3
2247 I really need to set goals 1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
2248 It was a 0-0 tie and we lost!! I JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND!! 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
2249 Do you have a bigger couch? 1.1781 0.04509 73 60 13 0
2250 "It's driving the deer crazy. 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
2251 Technically I'm supposed to get 60 minutes plus stoppage time... 1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
2252 I get to a point, but then I feel like I’m blocking 1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
2253 I don't handle rejection well. 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
2254 And they keep coming and coming and coming at me. 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
2255 I feel like I’m always pushing things away…never letting anything in. 1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
2256 Doc, I'm afraid that guy is trying to put something past me. 1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
2257 It is unconscionable to stop people from reaching their goals. 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
2258 I know it’s a part of the game, but it’s hard not to take it personally 1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
2259 Doc, It all started when I missed that goal..... 1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
2260 I don't think having the session where the stress happens is helpful" 1.1781 0.05634 73 63 7 3
2261 But does he want me to think he’s going left? 1.1778 0.04350 90 75 14 1
2262 Hmmmm… I’m going for the therapist. 1.1778 0.04628 90 76 12 2
2263 I can't help but take a penalty kick personally. 1.1774 0.06308 62 54 5 3
2264 I wanted to play baseball but then I'd miss all the Oles and of course the rioting. 1.1774 0.05405 62 52 9 1
2265 It's like he's looking straight past me. 1.1774 0.04891 62 51 11 0
2266 I can't stop thinking about dodgeball. 1.1774 0.06308 62 54 5 3
2267 This isn’t what I meant when I said you needed a goal. 1.1774 0.05405 62 52 9 1
2268 Everyone says to me, to "be the ball." But no one asks, "how is the ball?" 1.1774 0.04891 62 51 11 0
2269 It makes no difference. Everyone in Argentina is an analysis. He’s got my number. 1.1774 0.04891 62 51 11 0
2270 "Choose a worthy goal and defend it against all odds," my mother admonished. I'm beginning to think she was speaking figuratively 1.1774 0.05874 62 53 7 2
2271 The tension never lets up - they keep shooting at me! 1.1774 0.05405 62 52 9 1
2272 I can't make up my mind. I never know which way to go. 1.1774 0.05874 62 53 7 2
2273 No, I said I was destined to be a saver, not a savior. 1.1774 0.05874 62 53 7 2
2274 It's almost 50 minutes. Where are we on stoppage time? 1.1774 0.05405 62 52 9 1
2275 What’s the German word for ‘shot on Freud’? 1.1774 0.05874 62 53 7 2
2276 You're exhibiting a number of defense mechanisms. 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
2277 Who knew? 1.1772 0.05332 79 68 8 3
2278 I know my mom will love me no matter what, but what if... 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
2279 I always thought that anyone who plays goalie needs a shrink. 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
2280 Ever since Mommy first tried to feed me those awful strained peas, I guess. 1.1772 0.05332 79 68 8 3
2281 It's like they're trying to sneak one past me! 1.1772 0.04324 79 65 14 0
2282 I’m ambitious, but I’ve always avoided creating goals. 1.1772 0.04324 79 65 14 0
2283 I feel like everyone's out to get me. 1.1772 0.04324 79 65 14 0
2284 I swear, they’re aiming at me. 1.1772 0.05332 79 68 8 3
2285 Get it now? For me blocking is a good thing. 1.1771 0.04187 96 80 15 1
2286 I feel like we should be playing football but everyone calls it soccer. 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
2287 Suddenly, my life, career, and the ball flashed before my eyes. 1.1765 0.04657 68 56 12 0
2288 I have a problem with goals. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
2289 I can set goals for myself, but I never seem to reach them. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
2290 I get your question, but could you rephrase it in a funny caption-like way. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
2291 I don't know if we'll last Doc, all he sees me as is an obstacle 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
2292 Why do I feel like I’m the one being penalized? 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
2293 When I said I needed help with headers this wasn’t quite what I envisioned. 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
2294 That's the problem, doc. I feel like everyone has goals except for me. 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
2295 Now I see the reality of this Oedi-Pele Complex. 1.1765 0.06265 68 60 4 4
2296 They are always taking shots at me. 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
2297 Am I really injured or just looking for sympathy? 1.1765 0.05904 68 59 6 3
2298 This session is very helpful. Could you shift slightly to the right? 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
2299 I really dislike talking about my goals. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
2300 Sometimes people really are out to get you. 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
2301 So Doc, how do I stop these penalties from occuring 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
2302 . Yes, the women are going to get paid too - get over it 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
2303 I know I sound paranoid, but 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
2304 I always dream this where you'll take it right in the head and I'll win the game. 1.1758 0.04840 91 78 10 3
2305 I just don’t think I can stop the ball. 1.1757 0.05219 74 63 9 2
2306 What if I have big hands ? 1.1757 0.05219 74 63 9 2
2307 I’m glad the Players’ Association negotiated the inclusion of mindfulness in the last contract. 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
2308 I can’t keep shutting people out. 1.1757 0.05219 74 63 9 2
2309 We may need to cut this session a bit short. 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
2310 I feel like people are always trying to get something past me. 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
2311 I always go for the corners. 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
2312 I keep having these feelings of being targeted. 1.1757 0.04454 74 61 13 0
2313 I keep dreaming about driving a train into the net. 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
2314 Retire? I’m still Jung! 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
2315 I mean, 6500 migrants died building this stadium, should we really be playing football on their unmarked graves? So torn! 1.1754 0.06194 57 49 6 2
2316 I've been wracked with guilt that all I do is block other people's goals! 1.1754 0.05665 57 48 8 1
2317 What about the soccer dads? 1.1754 0.06194 57 49 6 2
2318 But it's NOT a free kick. There's a cost, but I'm the only one paying it. 1.1754 0.05083 57 47 10 0
2319 Goalkeeper was my mother’s idea. 1.1750 0.04960 80 68 10 2
2320 I feel as though my goals have become meaningless. 1.1750 0.04275 80 66 14 0
2321 I'm so ambivalent, left or right? 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
2322 Hold on! The goalie has just taken diving to a new level! 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
2323 Let’s talk about your goals 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
2324 Sadly, I’ve just never been good at setting goals and sticking to them. 1.1750 0.04275 80 66 14 0
2325 So then I said to myself, why not take a wellness break? 1.1750 0.04960 80 68 10 2
2326 …and just as the shootout is no more, I wake up… 1.1750 0.04275 80 66 14 0
2327 I could a been a goaltender 1.1750 0.04275 80 66 14 0
2328 I feel that no matter how much I extend myself. I’m always disappointing those around me. 1.1750 0.05270 80 69 8 3
2329 Hal is thrilled to finally have met his goal of practicing out in the field as a sports therapist. 1.1750 0.04275 80 66 14 0
2330 I know it’s not personal, but I can’t help but feel he’s kicking the ball at ME. 1.1750 0.05270 80 69 8 3
2331 I’m pretty sure my chances have nothing to do with me and everything to do with my mother. 1.1750 0.04275 80 66 14 0
2332 Block,Block,Block. It's like I'm all blocked up. 1.1746 0.05326 63 53 9 1
2333 I didn’t understand why the ball kept getting bigger and Bigger and BIGGER. Then it hit me. 1.1746 0.05787 63 54 7 2
2334 Sometimes I find this game so confusing 1.1746 0.05326 63 53 9 1
2335 Forget about him. Let's talk about YOUR goals. 1.1746 0.05787 63 54 7 2
2336 It’s kafkaesque, I woke up one morning and turned into a goalkeeper! 1.1746 0.05326 63 53 9 1
2337 I feel kicked around 1.1746 0.05326 63 53 9 1
2338 I see so many dead people here ... 1.1746 0.05326 63 53 9 1
2339 I keep having a dream that I get a 'delay of game' of game penalty kick called against me, ridiculous right? 1.1746 0.04821 63 52 11 0
2340 I can't shake this feeling that I'm being penalized for other people's mistakes. 1.1746 0.05326 63 53 9 1
2341 I always feel like I'm defending myself. 1.1746 0.05787 63 54 7 2
2342 The goal of all life is death … except this one. 1.1746 0.05787 63 54 7 2
2343 I just feel like a lot of things are getting past me these days. 1.1746 0.05326 63 53 9 1
2344 I feel like everyone is taking a shot at me. 1.1744 0.05015 86 74 9 3
2345 Yes, I do enjoy blocking people‘s goals so I can feel like a winner. We’re talking about the game, right? 1.1744 0.04436 86 72 13 1
2346 Then I realized that I am the blocker. 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
2347 I don’t know why, but I feel like I’m being held back in my current position. 1.1744 0.04116 86 71 15 0
2348 Nothing but Net! 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
2349 I 'm torn between pumping my fists or taking a knee. 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
2350 They say you miss every shot you don't take but... that just doesn't apply to me 1.1744 0.04436 86 72 13 1
2351 Why am I wearing a hat, Feggo? 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
2352 I feel like I’m the only person who doesn’t give a damn about the World Cup. 1.1739 0.05824 69 60 6 3
2353 It feels like everyone's trying to score points on me. 1.1739 0.05039 69 58 10 1
2354 Its just like in my dream, the ball- it just seems to be AFTER me. 1.1739 0.05039 69 58 10 1
2355 With respect, it’s not Main Character Syndrome when I say I’m the only one who can stop the ball. 1.1739 0.04596 69 57 12 0
2356 Same old nightmare: I have no hands 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
2357 I'm in a bowl....people are staring...sometimes they like me, sometimes they don't... 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
2358 World Cup dreaming 1.1739 0.04596 69 57 12 0
2359 His mother, again. 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
2360 Mental injury time 1.1739 0.05039 69 58 10 1
2361 Since 2016 I just can’t decide how far left or right I should lean. 1.1739 0.04596 69 57 12 0
2362 Intensely Boring Dream Syndrome... It's Spain, passing the ball...Just passing it back and forth...passing...just passing it...just p a s s i n g ..." 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
2363 I keep dreaming of how I can stage a meaningful protest. 1.1739 0.05824 69 60 6 3
2364 I can tell you're getting a kick out of this. 1.1739 0.05039 69 58 10 1
2365 I really don’t know why people say that I can be very annoying. 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
2366 Sometimes I feel I’m all tied up too 1.1739 0.05039 69 58 10 1
2367 The hardest part is when people tell me I'm faking it 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
2368 I keep having this dream where everything starts slipping through my hands then I get fired 1.1739 0.04596 69 57 12 0
2369 I'm defensive? 1.1733 0.05493 75 65 7 3
2370 I don’t know why she left me, Doc. I’m a keeper 1.1733 0.05155 75 64 9 2
2371 And then, when I was 12 ... 1.1733 0.05155 75 64 9 2
2372 I just feel like they never acknowledge my presence, why can’t they just kick it straight to me? 1.1733 0.04400 75 62 13 0
2373 It's always "goooooooooal" and never "blooooooooock." 1.1733 0.05812 75 66 5 4
2374 'I just feel like I'm always to goalie, never the bride' 1.1733 0.05155 75 64 9 2
2375 I just don't know what I'm blocking anymore, the ball or my feelings. 1.1733 0.05155 75 64 9 2
2376 I need to talk about the offside rule,again. 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
2377 I do set goals, but he makes me feel penalized. 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
2378 I'm the only one that's really hands on. 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
2379 But how can I honest when my whole life I've been taught to just block things out? 1.1733 0.04400 75 62 13 0
2380 So the net is my mother and the kicker is my dad? 1.1733 0.04400 75 62 13 0
2381 But my entire identity is a defense mechanism! 1.1733 0.04400 75 62 13 0
2382 Why do I feel my life goals like a penalty? 1.1733 0.04400 75 62 13 0
2383 What if I make the save, but it doesn’t make me happy? 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
2384 The job description said they were looking for a “team player” - someone who “works well under pressure” and is “goal-oriented.” I really feel like I’ve proven all of this, and still, there’s only so far they’ll let me move forward. 1.1733 0.05155 75 64 9 2
2385 Its not like gatekeeping runs in my blood. 1.1733 0.05155 75 64 9 2
2386 My wife said I had to put myself first. 1.1728 0.05209 81 70 8 3
2387 It's the same dream over and over. I'm tending goal and there's a striker starring me down. And I am completely out of position because I'm lying on a couch talking to you. 1.1728 0.05209 81 70 8 3
2388 Keep it quick Doc. Stoppage time is accruing! 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
2389 My sister might make more money than me. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
2390 I feel like I'm always going it alone. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
2391 Where was I? Oh...fear of flying projectiles... 1.1728 0.04578 81 68 12 1
2392 My mother always set goals for me. 1.1728 0.04578 81 68 12 1
2393 I feel like my goal is out of reach 1.1728 0.05209 81 70 8 3
2394 Doctor, I feel like I'm constantly under fire from my coworkers. 1.1728 0.04227 81 67 14 0
2395 I feel guilty…it’s nearly impossible for me to make goals, so I block those of everyone else. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
2396 Doc, My life is just so Messi 1.1724 0.05575 58 49 8 1
2397 Coach disagrees. He thinks we are never so defenseless as when we submit to psychoanalysis during a match. 1.1724 0.04961 87 75 9 3
2398 It feels like if I anything wrong around here, people are ready to shoot first and ask questions later. 1.1724 0.05575 58 49 8 1
2399 I need to narrow my goals. 1.1724 0.05575 58 49 8 1
2400 I don't know why people think that it's always all about me. 1.1724 0.05003 58 48 10 0
2401 I felt I needed a psychic injury time out. 1.1724 0.05575 58 49 8 1
2402 Mom would always say, ‘Pick a SIDE...’ 1.1724 0.05575 58 49 8 1
2403 Sometimes I just feel like falling on my knees and cry 1.1724 0.05003 58 48 10 0
2404 I have this recurring dream that my psychiatrist gets bashed in the head with a soccer ball. 1.1720 0.04983 93 81 8 4
2405 I'm having dreams of impending doom... 1.1720 0.04221 93 78 14 1
2406 You can actually fake emotional injuries, too. 1.1720 0.04743 93 80 10 3
2407 But you must agree that sometimes a banana kick is just a banana kick. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
2408 Life's either a bore or too stressful. Any strategies to deal with that? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
2409 Sometimes I fear a teammate is about to cheap-shot me. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
2410 Doc, you are much more patient than the coach we used to have. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
2411 Mother said to do right, but I’m afraid I can’t. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
2412 It's not just me. Everyone is kicking and screaming! 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
2413 It's not knowing which way to jump. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
2414 To kick or not to kick. That is the existential dilemma. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
2415 The overtime is charged separately. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
2416 In the end, who’s going to save me 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
2417 Is that even allowed under the rules? 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
2418 If I go left, I'm screwed. If I go right, I'm screwed. But enough about politics, I'm in the middle of a game, doc. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
2419 I've been studying Portuguese but it doesn't seem to help. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
2420 I don't even like touching balls." 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
2421 …and you were there too… 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
2422 I constantly have a lingering feeling that I’m offsides. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
2423 .....And then all the royal princes and princesses gather round me as I sing 'Getting to goal you, Getting to goal all, about you....' 1.1717 0.04071 99 83 15 1
2424 They just don't treat me like a part of the team- it's always, 'you're supposed to wear shin guards not kneepads, idiot' or, 'nice hat moron, what do you think this is, baseball?' 1.1717 0.04549 99 85 11 3
2425 I feel like he doesn't want to give me the ball. 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2426 Yes, I’d say I had a goal-oriented childhood”. 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
2427 I feel like this job just isn’t my main goal in life 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
2428 I regret not sticking with hockey! 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
2429 My goals aren't like anybody else's. 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2430 Things just seem to be coming at me too fast... 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
2431 Their shots are missing me and hitting the net. 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
2432 I keep having this dream where balls keep flying by me. Any idea about what it means? 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2433 I will have to bill you for the stoppage time. 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
2434 I keep imagining I’m a soccer goalie. 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2435 I still get a kick while playing soccer. 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
2436 This is my last will and testimony in case I get trounced by the crowd. 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2437 I know you’re really here to check my eyesight. 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2438 It's the second half, we're leading by one point, and I've paid for fifty minutes. So just keep listening. 1.1714 0.05745 70 61 6 3
2439 Not so fast Dr: I still have 5 minutes of stoppage time left 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2440 I just feel like I need to save everything. 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2441 I get way too much pleasure seeing others fail. 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
2442 To be perfectly honest with you, I don't even like team sports. This was my mothers idea. 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
2443 I feel so exposed. 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
2444 This goalie anxiety thing has gone too far. 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
2445 I'd prefer to focus on my own goals. 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2446 One of the voices is telling me to go left, and the other is telling me to go right.” 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
2447 Yup. Reoccurring dream. I keep getting bombarded by these white spheres. 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2448 Doc, I feel fine. Can we please conclude this concussion protocol? 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
2449 I always want to go right, but go left, cause you know, is it my right or his right which counts? I know, I know, I should stay in the middle, but… 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
2450 I wonder if I can get his contact...Paul is unbeatable since he has mental health support 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2451 She said I was a keeper but won't call me back? Honestly I can't handle the suspense. 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2452 but it’s in moments like this i wonder ‘who’s gonna save me?’ 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
2453 but who’s gonna save me? 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
2454 All my life it's felt like I've had a target on my back. 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
2455 I'm not exaggerating when I say the whole world will be let down if I fail 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2456 I KEEP THINKING OF MYSELF AS A TARGET 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2457 I sometimes imagine I’m a goalie, but instead of playing in the game, I’m lying on a couch, talking to a psychiatrist.” 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2458 It's hard to explain Doc. It's really Messi in here... 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2459 Just keep talking. In his country, it's rude to interrupt. 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
2460 I have dreams that I don't let them reach their goal. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2461 Just think of the penalty taker as your father and the ball as your mother. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2462 The Coach doesn’t appreciate me, doc. And these constant attacks are getting to me! 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
2463 I know psychoanalysis takes a long time, but I've got a free kick coming. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2464 I know it’s important to set goals, but this one scares me. 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
2465 So now you're telling me I need to be *more* defensive? Is that my new goal? 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
2466 Yes but, what are YOUR goals? 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2467 Enough of these mind games. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2468 So you're saying I need to reach more to meet my goal. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2469 With the slightest domestic quibble…he falls to the ground, writhing in pain! 1.1711 0.04348 76 63 13 0
2470 And she said Roberto you’ll never be Baggio. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
2471 I can’t stop thinking I know he knows I know . . . . 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
2472 What do you charge for extra-time? 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
2473 I know it shouldn't bother me so much but that free kick I missed last year has really messed up my life. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
2474 Setting goals just doesn’t come naturally for me doc. 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
2475 Can any one person ever stop the ball? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
2476 I know I’m directionless and need a goal, but now’s not the time. 1.1702 0.04446 94 80 12 2
2477 We told him to hit the mental not the metal. 1.1700 0.04507 100 86 11 3
2478 I'm always wondering, what's my goal in life? 1.1698 0.05207 53 44 9 0
2479 I’m just tired of all the mixed signals. 1.1695 0.04926 59 49 10 0
2480 ‘I have the feeling I’m not in a good position’ 1.1695 0.05488 59 50 8 1
2481 Blocking things isn't always a bad thing. 1.1695 0.05488 59 50 8 1
2482 It’s either left or right, left or right. So I guess I’m binary? 1.1695 0.05488 59 50 8 1
2483 But, I thought you said I should be goal oriented. 1.1695 0.04926 59 49 10 0
2484 The keeper's trying to shrink the goal 1.1695 0.05488 59 50 8 1
2485 I had this strange dream that our weekly session happened on the field during the World Cup. Oh, wait… 1.1695 0.04926 59 49 10 0
2486 Wow, Doc! Nothing gets passed you! 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
2487 You're saying it's a BAD thing that I help people reach their goals? 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
2488 Pumas or Adidas? Mother would never let me pick my own. 1.1692 0.06032 65 57 5 3
2489 And how does that make you field? 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
2490 I feel guilty that he is so obsessively goal-oriented. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
2491 No matter how big my gloves are, it's never enough! 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
2492 I just can’t let it go. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
2493 It feels like every 4 years the whole world is watching me. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
2494 I still don’t get it… how is this more popular than American football? 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
2495 …when it’s really my potential I’ve been blocking. 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
2496 I dunno…I feel like people are always taking shots at me. 1.1692 0.06032 65 57 5 3
2497 You choose for me. Do I go left, right or stay put? 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
2498 I'm beginning to understand why I'm not oriented toward a goal. 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
2499 Let’s face it. My one goal is more powerful than any ‘Iran deal.’ 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
2500 And then in the reoccurring nightmare, millions around the world are yelling GOAL and I'm hated forever. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
2501 I have no goals. 1.1690 0.04479 71 59 12 0
2502 She called me a keeper but it sounded so objective. 1.1690 0.04479 71 59 12 0
2503 If the ball hits me I'll know I've done my job, and you can go back into the stands. 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
2504 My goal in life? No, I don't think I obsess about it. 1.1690 0.05302 71 61 8 2
2505 The mental block. Hard to overcome. 1.1690 0.05302 71 61 8 2
2506 I wanted to join the drama club, but my dad forced me into sports and now I have anxiety. 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
2507 Are you sure this is the best place to discuss this? 1.1690 0.05669 71 62 6 3
2508 I think I have boundary issues. I feel boxed in. 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
2509 She says I have a savior complex. 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
2510 Does the score really matter? 1.1690 0.04479 71 59 12 0
2511 Mom would say, 'Pick a SIDE...' 1.1690 0.05302 71 61 8 2
2512 I see our time is up. 1.1690 0.05669 71 62 6 3
2513 Maybe it is just a mental block 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
2514 Of course I mind. I mind the net. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
2515 The ball hit me in the head and the next thing I knew I thought I was dead. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
2516 When he stutters . . I stutter. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
2517 In my dream my mother sleeps with the ball.” 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
2518 My aspirations are nil. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
2519 Constructive use of half-time causes major competitor upset! 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
2520 It's a public and private hell, not knowing which way to jump. 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
2521 They were all lined up against me. 1.1688 0.05359 77 67 7 3
2522 Everyone’s always taking shots at me at work. 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
2523 When you say “just let it go” what exactly are you telling me? 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
2524 I mean, how literally should I be taking his attacks? 1.1688 0.04297 77 64 13 0
2525 I’ve got next… 1.1688 0.04297 77 64 13 0
2526 Maybe sometimes I *do* carry the weight of the game on my shoulders 1.1688 0.04297 77 64 13 0
2527 Mother says I've taken siding with the Ukrainians too far. 1.1687 0.04135 83 69 14 0
2528 its time to retire that goalie 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
2529 And then, when I was nine, I was cut from the team. That's when I decided to be a goalie and let nothing get past me! 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
2530 So he dreams about winning the World Cup. We all do so let's wrap it up. 1.1687 0.04135 83 69 14 0
2531 I don’t feel like their compulsion should be my responsibility. 1.1685 0.03991 89 74 15 0
2532 It feels like I’m always playing defence. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
2533 You’re damn right I have no goals. 1.1667 0.05761 54 46 7 1
2534 Yes, I've been blocking a lot of things in my life. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
2535 I wish you could stop everything like you do to the bad dreams. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
2536 Would you say you feel pressure in your job...? 1.1667 0.05403 60 51 8 1
2537 Actually I find everyone else on the team to be offensive. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
2538 Jesus saves, why can’t I? 1.1667 0.05233 72 62 8 2
2539 We're going to work on your goals today. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
2540 My goal in life is to have no goals. 1.1667 0.05233 72 62 8 2
2541 I had this dream that the twine ate me. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
2542 And I just feel like I'm the one being kept. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
2543 I feel I'm not goal oriented enough. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
2544 The time-out is almost over. Tell me what I should do. 1.1667 0.05761 54 46 7 1
2545 Its because of my mother. She said " Be a goalie. You don't have to run up and down and get sweaty. It's an easy job". So here I am. 1.1667 0.04255 90 76 13 1
2546 For as long as I've known him, my father-in-law has told me I'm not a keeper. This from a man who calls it soccer." 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
2547 I've realised it's best to deal with these issues as soon as they arise 1.1667 0.04423 72 60 12 0
2548 Dr. Freud, do the opposing teammates have a conscious mind? 1.1667 0.04845 72 61 10 1
2549 I raised the bar too high... 1.1667 0.04740 84 72 10 2
2550 I keep waiting for him to kick it so I can move on. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
2551 The German team uses the Freud defense." 1.1667 0.04539 90 77 11 2
2552 This is how I psych out the opposition 1.1667 0.04423 72 60 12 0
2553 Mom always liked him more than me. 1.1667 0.04845 72 61 10 1
2554 Well you see, my partner keeps threatening to “take it to the war room” ……. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
2555 What makes me sad? Well, unless my wife yells "Goal!" after we make love, I start to cry. 1.1667 0.04423 72 60 12 0
2556 First a free session before the free kick 1.1667 0.04852 60 50 10 0
2557 I think it comes from my mother getting in the way of my goals. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
2558 It seems everything falls on me for something I had nothing to do with. 1.1667 0.05233 72 62 8 2
2559 You say I shouldn't be overthinking it? 1.1667 0.04845 72 61 10 1
2560 It was my first handball in the box. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
2561 I just don’t get it. Ted Lasso made it look so easy. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
2562 Visualize the ball flying by you into the net. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
2563 This sports psychologist trend has gone too far. 1.1667 0.05403 60 51 8 1
2564 We'll soon be in overtime! 1.1667 0.04423 72 60 12 0
2565 My problem is, I have too many career goals. 1.1667 0.05233 72 62 8 2
2566 Forget my head. Quick, shrink the goal! 1.1667 0.04740 84 72 10 2
2567 But doctor, I AM Mat Ryan! 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
2568 Everyone tells me I'm so disconnected. 1.1667 0.04845 72 61 10 1
2569 No, no. I said that in my dream I was a Mess. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
2570 Sometimes I think that I'm too goal-oriented. 1.1667 0.05403 60 51 8 1
2571 No Win Benders, please 1.1667 0.05761 54 46 7 1
2572 Coach told me to dive left, but mom would disapprove. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
2573 I know our time is up, but can you +5? 1.1667 0.05233 72 62 8 2
2574 I think I started flopping because I wasn’t hugged enough as a child. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
2575 They yelled “goal!!!” And I took that personally. 1.1667 0.05034 84 73 8 3
2576 I need a bigger couch. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
2577 You see, I still haven't decided if I want to be a hero or a villain. 1.1667 0.05233 72 62 8 2
2578 She said I was a real keeper, which I thought was a pretty forward thing to say after knowing someone for just 90 minutes. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
2579 It’s always ‘what’s the keeper doing’, never ‘how’s the keeper doing?’ 1.1667 0.05934 72 64 4 4
2580 But then VAR completely ignored the way I FELT about that play. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
2581 If I dive to my left and he shoots to my right...but if I dive right and he shoots left.......I'm so conflicted.... 1.1667 0.05233 72 62 8 2
2582 All I do is deflect deflect deflect 1.1649 0.04318 97 83 12 2
2583 So in my dream, I’m in session with you on the couch during penalty shot time, and as long as my feet are behind the line, we’re good 1.1648 0.03911 91 76 15 0
2584 It’s just that our goals are different 1.1648 0.04492 91 78 11 2
2585 And in my dream the U.S. made the round of 16. 1.1648 0.04212 91 77 13 1
2586 I can't tolerate this Messi situation 1.1647 0.04978 85 74 8 3
2587 Preserving my analytic hour requires no defense! 1.1647 0.04379 85 72 12 1
2588 It’s like all I do is bills and penalties. 1.1647 0.04688 85 73 10 2
2589 I keep having this dream I'm in the World Cup. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
2590 Is there more to life than blocking the ambitions of others? 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
2591 I do feel guilty about the extra 30 minutes of stoppage time. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
2592 I don't know what his goal is ! 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
2593 I mean, what’s the goal here? 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
2594 I have no interest in trying to block that stupid ball. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
2595 I always have to suffer the consequences for their penalties. 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
2596 No one sees me at all. They all look right pass me. It's starting to give me a complex you know? 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
2597 I'm struggling to keep my head in the game. 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
2598 It seems like every day is just another kick in the head. 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
2599 Of course it's a defense mechanism. I'm in a shoot-out with sudden death looming. 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
2600 I don't care about your dreams, can you stop a penalty shot? 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
2601 No, please continue. We'll just add the time onto the end. 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
2602 I feel blocked in my goal to block goals! 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
2603 And that's when I asked myself...what really is the goal here? 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
2604 There is always a ball coming at me! 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
2605 I'm either blocking things out or holding them close, only to throw them away. 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
2606 Most of the time I just don't feel very Brazilian. 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
2607 It just feels like everyone in the world is penalizing me doc. 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
2608 My life has just become more Messi and i 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
2609 Sure, I save the ball. But who is going to save me? 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
2610 I just feel like I’m keeping people from accomplishing their goals. 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
2611 Head-butting in the anal stage. 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
2612 If only the referees would listen like you do. 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
2613 I’m worried that his ego is bigger than my id. 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
2614 His only obstacle was psychological. 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
2615 It feels like I am working overtime because my colleague couldn't do his job properly 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
2616 I just wanted to bend it like Beckham. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
2617 They said net profit was our goal. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2618 My goals? Seriously? 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
2619 I feel like everyone is rooting for me to fail. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
2620 Am I being paranoid, doc, or is it just a coincidence that this soccer-themed cartoon appeared during the World Cup? 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
2621 I think he’s trying to hurt me! 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2622 And I just can't help but feeling like everyone is taking shots at me. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2623 How about you analyze him next and we all just have a group hug ? 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2624 I feel my life is heading toward a zero/zero finale. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
2625 Couldn't this have waited a couple of weeks?! 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2626 Didn't know instant health check was so... instant! 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2627 I just don’t understand why I can’t wear the arm band. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
2628 I’m just always on the ball… 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
2629 My whole life I’ve been the responsible one. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
2630 Why is everyone avoiding me? 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
2631 THIS is a penalty kick? 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2632 I’m tired of being so defensive all the time. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
2633 The stopper never stops!!! How about you Doc? 1.1642 0.05862 67 59 5 3
2634 Well fans, it looks like the team’s personal coach has called a 45 minute timeout to discuss players’ goals. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2635 Messi,Messi,Messi...I just can't stop him! 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
2636 Why do I feel so responsible for everything? 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2637 ''Don't tell the other team, but I'm taking a mental dive here.'' 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
2638 He keeps Messing up my game.” Eleanor Huber London, Ontario, Canada e.huber@rogers.co 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
2639 I feel like my career is all just a game. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
2640 It makes me feel I can’t play the hands I was dealt. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
2641 Woulda, coulda, shoulda. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2642 chalk it up to hands envy 1.1642 0.06236 67 60 3 4
2643 I keep having dreams of being a ten but wake up seeing that I am not a ten 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2644 This is really gonna hurt, physically and mentally. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
2645 ...and that cloud looks like my mother..... 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
2646 I’m just so sick of playing the field… 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
2647 I could handle it if he was a straight shooter. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
2648 I blame my mother for putting me in this situation. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
2649 Maybe this is why I don't let people in. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
2650 Blocking"? What do you mean I'm "blocking"? That's what I'm supposed to do .. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
2651 The coach wants me to do more goal setting. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
2652 I just don't get why I'm the one who always has to take the shots for someone else's penalty! 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
2653 My brain! Utterly Messi. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
2654 So here's the kicker, Doc, I keep dreaming about soccer. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
2655 He’s in network and it was LITERALLY the only opening he had. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
2656 Coach said header, not head case 1.1636 0.06230 55 48 5 2
2657 I feel as though I'm always being put on the defensive. 1.1636 0.05664 55 47 7 1
2658 You’re tending the goal, but who’s tending to your needs? 1.1636 0.05034 55 46 9 0
2659 Everyone's always asking me to save this and save that! But who's saving me? 1.1636 0.05034 55 46 9 0
2660 Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in! 1.1636 0.05664 55 47 7 1
2661 Sometimes I feel that everyone is watching me. 1.1636 0.05034 55 46 9 0
2662 The thing is, I do see where he’s coming from 1.1633 0.06080 49 42 6 1
2663 I don't get a kick out of life anymore. 1.1628 0.04637 86 74 10 2
2664 A bunch of aggressive guys are targeting me. 1.1628 0.04637 86 74 10 2
2665 It isn't you. It's him. 1.1628 0.04924 86 75 8 3
2666 It's like the sky's fragmenting into black-and-white hexagonal shapes, falling on me. And Doc, when those pieces land, they HURT. 1.1628 0.04924 86 75 8 3
2667 Having therapy at my workplace makes me more defensive. 1.1628 0.04332 86 73 12 1
2668 Now the loss of men,women and children on both sides was so great that Shiz commanded his people that they should not pursue the armies of General Goodtimes 1.1628 0.04637 86 74 10 2
2669 I’m paying way to much money for this session to not attend it. 1.1628 0.04332 86 73 12 1
2670 Deflection is my defense mechanism.” 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
2671 It seems that everyone around me are hitting their goals and I’m just here failing. 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
2672 What do you mean my neurosis also keeps others from achieving their goals? 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
2673 Please help me understand the whole extra time thing. 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
2674 So, I need to stop EVERYTHING? 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
2675 And then the ball becomes my mother, and she won't let me touch her. 1.1622 0.05781 74 66 4 4
2676 I am big! It's Number 10 who got small! 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
2677 and then I told him "Just wait a second while I pull up my socks...." 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
2678 I just feel like everyone else has goals. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
2679 C'mon, it's not paranoia if my opponent is wearing the same uniform as me! 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
2680 And then I have no hands and am attached to a pole. What do you think it means? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
2681 I think I get in the way of my goals. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
2682 The real goal is to uncover the childhood trauma 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
2683 My mother was very protective. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
2684 Tell me about the goalie's anxiety at the penalty kick. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
2685 I feel that the whole world is kicking things at me." Cal Bellamy, Munster, I 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
2686 It’s like something is constantly standing between me and my goals. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
2687 I feel vulnerable without my wall. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
2688 No, I don't think I am a-Freud of incursions on my space! 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
2689 And I can’t help but think “who’s going to save *me*?” 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
2690 Why am I the only one who can use his hands on the field? 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
2691 And then they told me not to worry FIFA would put my money in the bank but it hasn’t been deposited yet… 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
2692 I’m really stressed out here doc, I thought it was the other kind of football.” 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
2693 I have the feeling that I'm too goal-oriented. 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
2694 I really need to get past my tendency to reject everything people offer me. 1.1618 0.04499 68 57 11 0
2695 Sometimes I feel like I am crossing the line. 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
2696 But in my dream, it went in, the ball that is ... 1.1618 0.04499 68 57 11 0
2697 I really just want to discuss my life goals. 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
2698 I feel like I can never achieve my goals. 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
2699 Doc, I feel like I should be more goal-oriented. 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
2700 My entire life has been dedicated to blocking the achievements of others. 1.1618 0.04499 68 57 11 0
2701 . . . and then he called me bad names, said 'tough-titties' and then he even cast aspersions on my mother! 1.1618 0.04499 68 57 11 0
2702 But -when does therapy kick in? 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
2703 Should I be the one giving the shots or taking it? 1.1618 0.04499 68 57 11 0
2704 Sometimes I just wish I could find my own keeper. 1.1618 0.04499 68 57 11 0
2705 I’m always getting defensive and deflecting things. 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
2706 ‘So the ball is my lost childhood?’ 1.1618 0.05387 68 59 7 2
2707 It's just that no one has any idea of the pressure I'm under in these games... 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
2708 I didn't realize therapy could be goal savng! 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
2709 I feel like I can't drop my defences - even for a minute. I'm worried I'm blocking out everything happening around me! 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
2710 Shouldn't be that hard...DUCK! 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
2711 If he scores,I let my team down,if I stop it l negatively affected his lfe 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
2712 Doc, I just need you to help me through this one crisis! 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
2713 I just can't seem to figure out why I have a hard time achieving my own goals. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
2714 I just feel like everyone is trying to avoid me! 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
2715 The problem is I've never been a goal-oriented person. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
2716 What goals do YOU want to accomplish? 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
2717 I just can't shake the feeling that others try to slip things past me 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
2718 I do feel guilty doc, but I’m not catching the unconscious part you’re saying… 1.1613 0.04128 93 79 13 1
2719 I don’t know why I always feel like everybody is watching my every move. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
2720 i’ve had to save so much in my life, yet so little I could keep 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
2721 I guess the goal is a bit guarded, emotionally. 1.1613