These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.
Name | Value |
---|---|
Submission deadline | 2022-06-12T19:01:00.000Z |
Voting started | - |
Voting ended | 2022-06-26T19:03:00.000Z |
Finalists announced | 2022-06-20T19:03:00.000Z |
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued | June 27, 2022 |
Number of captions | 4980 |
Number of responses | 702174 |
Number of participants | - |
In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.
Rank | Caption | Mean | Precision | Total votes | "Unfunny" votes | "Somewhat funny" votes | "Funny" votes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
0 | The castle looked bigger on Zillow. | 1.8177 | 0.01621 | 2249 | 907 | 845 | 497 |
1 | Could you rub some WD-40 on my back? | 1.7899 | 0.01346 | 3331 | 1429 | 1173 | 729 |
2 | Can I interest you in a one knight stand? | 1.7827 | 0.01351 | 3668 | 1712 | 1041 | 915 |
3 | There is a high serf advisory. | 1.7575 | 0.01471 | 2726 | 1214 | 959 | 553 |
4 | I may not be suited to this job. | 1.7572 | 0.01778 | 1845 | 816 | 661 | 368 |
5 | This is just a summer job to help pay for knight school. | 1.7562 | 0.01369 | 3146 | 1404 | 1105 | 637 |
6 | I’d say the toughest part is the chainmail Speedo. | 1.7523 | 0.01358 | 3492 | 1663 | 1031 | 798 |
7 | They only let you protect the real castle after a summer internship. | 1.7482 | 0.01743 | 1855 | 815 | 692 | 348 |
8 | Watch out. Serfs are up. | 1.7480 | 0.01253 | 3933 | 1835 | 1254 | 844 |
9 | It’s actually quite comfortable, but the sand gets in places you wouldn’t believe | 1.7463 | 0.01800 | 1707 | 743 | 654 | 310 |
10 | Hi. I’m Rusty. | 1.7431 | 0.01267 | 3698 | 1694 | 1260 | 744 |
11 | Dress for the job you want,not the job you have. | 1.7368 | 0.01226 | 3967 | 1842 | 1327 | 798 |
12 | Does this outfit make me look middle aged? | 1.7348 | 0.01241 | 3967 | 1877 | 1265 | 825 |
13 | You look like you've never seen a middle aged lifeguard before. | 1.7344 | 0.01396 | 3072 | 1435 | 1018 | 619 |
14 | Laugh all you want, but which one of us looks more like shark bait? | 1.7260 | 0.01346 | 3077 | 1394 | 1132 | 551 |
15 | I'm a lifeguard by day, but I still have a knight job. | 1.7252 | 0.02055 | 1379 | 643 | 472 | 264 |
16 | Swimmers in distress are all yours, damsels in distress are mine. | 1.7241 | 0.01344 | 3143 | 1445 | 1120 | 578 |
17 | USC. And you? | 1.7227 | 0.01467 | 2834 | 1366 | 888 | 580 |
18 | I'm having a Middle-Ages crisis. | 1.7198 | 0.01363 | 3076 | 1430 | 1078 | 568 |
19 | High tide. What's you're greatest fear? | 1.7172 | 0.01776 | 1800 | 837 | 635 | 328 |
20 | I'm using WD 40 instead of SPF 40 | 1.7149 | 0.01358 | 3083 | 1441 | 1080 | 562 |
21 | Thanks, I like your suit too. | 1.7113 | 0.01246 | 3315 | 1469 | 1334 | 512 |
22 | Well no, I never saved anybody, but nobody's touching that sandcastle. | 1.7079 | 0.01810 | 1712 | 803 | 606 | 303 |
23 | Vandals and Visigoths are no problem, but high tide is a bitch. | 1.6958 | 0.02709 | 779 | 377 | 262 | 140 |
24 | The king promised me a castle with an ocean view. | 1.6928 | 0.01916 | 1491 | 707 | 535 | 249 |
25 | Come to Camelot, they said. A shining castle by the side of the sea, they said. | 1.6893 | 0.02093 | 1268 | 610 | 442 | 216 |
26 | This was actually built in a day. | 1.6694 | 0.01473 | 2450 | 1190 | 880 | 380 |
27 | I'm searching for the Holy Pail. | 1.6627 | 0.01553 | 2407 | 1241 | 737 | 429 |
28 | We clearly interpreted “Protect the beach” very differently. | 1.6590 | 0.01575 | 2100 | 1027 | 762 | 311 |
29 | I'm in search of the Holy Pail. | 1.6580 | 0.01678 | 2047 | 1059 | 629 | 359 |
30 | My orders for this battle are to turn the tide, | 1.6575 | 0.01532 | 2251 | 1112 | 798 | 341 |
31 | It’s a little hot but it’s SPF rating is off the charts. | 1.6573 | 0.01489 | 2361 | 1161 | 848 | 352 |
32 | When I asked for the Knight shift, this wasn't what I had in mind. | 1.6551 | 0.01466 | 2470 | 1228 | 866 | 376 |
33 | I have been greatly misinformed about the nature of the ironman challenge. | 1.6487 | 0.01384 | 2872 | 1472 | 937 | 463 |
34 | Don't give me that look, three drowning girls this month said I was their knight in shining armor. | 1.6404 | 0.01555 | 2069 | 1023 | 767 | 279 |
35 | It's a spear. But, yes I'm happy to see you. | 1.6370 | 0.01435 | 2807 | 1505 | 816 | 486 |
36 | I dress for the job I want. | 1.6340 | 0.01467 | 2456 | 1263 | 829 | 364 |
37 | 'You can live much closer to the ocean if you're willing to downsize.' | 1.6290 | 0.01415 | 2671 | 1393 | 876 | 402 |
38 | Oh yeah, it's hot as hell but the SPF is 15,000. | 1.6276 | 0.02367 | 956 | 500 | 312 | 144 |
39 | I'm meeting the rook and the bishop after my shift. | 1.6256 | 0.02911 | 625 | 326 | 207 | 92 |
40 | Can you help. I'm a little rusty. | 1.6251 | 0.02231 | 1027 | 527 | 358 | 142 |
41 | They promised no dragons . . . plus dental. | 1.6234 | 0.01704 | 1747 | 896 | 613 | 238 |
42 | You’re jealous because mine is actually a pony’s tail . | 1.6175 | 0.01542 | 2238 | 1187 | 720 | 331 |
43 | Just remember, the king is pretty sensitive about his height. | 1.6170 | 0.02758 | 778 | 436 | 204 | 138 |
44 | Not to brag, but in all the time I’ve been doing this not a single one of these things has been destroyed by a dragon. | 1.6167 | 0.02558 | 801 | 422 | 264 | 115 |
45 | The pay isn't much, but the dragons are way smaller. | 1.6129 | 0.01569 | 2059 | 1074 | 708 | 277 |
46 | Well it would be shiny if not for the salt air | 1.6127 | 0.02646 | 723 | 377 | 249 | 97 |
47 | It saves on sunscreen. | 1.6085 | 0.01892 | 1313 | 666 | 495 | 152 |
48 | ‘‘My pronouns are thee/thy/thou.” | 1.5998 | 0.01874 | 1779 | 1054 | 383 | 342 |
49 | If some toddler comes to knock this over don't get in my way. | 1.5980 | 0.02501 | 806 | 430 | 270 | 106 |
50 | I typically work the Knight shift. | 1.5979 | 0.01734 | 1716 | 926 | 554 | 236 |
51 | It's not the tide I'm worried about, it's the Normans. | 1.5928 | 0.01843 | 1493 | 806 | 489 | 198 |
52 | So, are you doing anything after high tide? | 1.5875 | 0.01851 | 1411 | 752 | 489 | 170 |
53 | They have me working the knight shift. | 1.5862 | 0.01880 | 1433 | 782 | 462 | 189 |
54 | Don’t you hate it when sand gets in your suit? | 1.5860 | 0.01910 | 1488 | 839 | 426 | 223 |
55 | If I told you what this kid is paying me you wouldn’t believe me. | 1.5856 | 0.01829 | 1443 | 771 | 499 | 173 |
56 | The main threat's not the tide. It's the rust. | 1.5844 | 0.01859 | 1374 | 730 | 485 | 159 |
57 | No, I don’t have any SPF-40. Do you have any WD-40? | 1.5844 | 0.02077 | 1393 | 828 | 316 | 249 |
58 | Stainless steel has been a game changer for me! | 1.5763 | 0.01940 | 1272 | 688 | 435 | 149 |
59 | I'm from a very small kingdom. | 1.5729 | 0.01990 | 1194 | 646 | 412 | 136 |
60 | I quit my day job for this knight job. | 1.5729 | 0.02032 | 1194 | 658 | 388 | 148 |
61 | I hope you closed the castle windows. It's almost high tide. | 1.5708 | 0.02243 | 1293 | 817 | 214 | 262 |
62 | I'll cover the moat, if you cover the ocean. | 1.5675 | 0.02328 | 1193 | 755 | 199 | 239 |
63 | I’m one of those hot summer knights you hear so much about. | 1.5662 | 0.02406 | 1042 | 638 | 218 | 186 |
64 | You think sand in your swimsuits bad… | 1.5656 | 0.02275 | 1105 | 660 | 265 | 180 |
65 | Yeah. I'll have the last laugh when the sharks get hungry. | 1.5646 | 0.02073 | 1084 | 591 | 374 | 119 |
66 | Medieval studies and architecture, you? | 1.5642 | 0.02270 | 1067 | 627 | 278 | 162 |
67 | You know what they say, dress for the job you want, not the job you have | 1.5637 | 0.02226 | 1130 | 670 | 283 | 177 |
68 | Hail, Seashore! | 1.5586 | 0.02372 | 1101 | 691 | 205 | 205 |
69 | I'm working my way up to guarding a White Castle. | 1.5565 | 0.02562 | 717 | 398 | 239 | 80 |
70 | SPF 4000. You? | 1.5564 | 0.02308 | 1001 | 587 | 271 | 143 |
71 | It was this or Scotland in January. | 1.5556 | 0.03067 | 504 | 281 | 166 | 57 |
72 | Okay! So it's not much of a kingdom, but it's mine ! | 1.5526 | 0.02252 | 912 | 506 | 308 | 98 |
73 | How do you keep the sand from getting in your suit? | 1.5485 | 0.02338 | 917 | 530 | 271 | 116 |
74 | You must spend a fortune on sunscreen. | 1.5455 | 0.02346 | 858 | 486 | 276 | 96 |
75 | This what happens when you pledge your fealty to a 6 year old. | 1.5422 | 0.02542 | 817 | 488 | 215 | 114 |
76 | His Majesty bid me defend it whilst he quests for the yellow shovel. | 1.5410 | 0.02489 | 817 | 480 | 232 | 105 |
77 | I promised my daughter I would protect her castle from the enemies while she gets ice cream 🍦 | 1.5381 | 0.02499 | 775 | 449 | 235 | 91 |
78 | Thanks, I'm good with sunscreen. But you wouldn't happen to have some WD-40 I could borrow? | 1.5355 | 0.02637 | 760 | 459 | 195 | 106 |
79 | It looked bigger on AirBNB | 1.5350 | 0.02671 | 757 | 462 | 185 | 110 |
80 | It's not the tide of history that I'm concerned about. | 1.5331 | 0.02560 | 756 | 446 | 217 | 93 |
81 | What do you mean did I buy flood insurance” | 1.5310 | 0.02652 | 678 | 395 | 206 | 77 |
82 | It's been a few years since I did this, so I'm kind of rusty. | 1.5299 | 0.02571 | 719 | 419 | 219 | 81 |
83 | In this job, it’s sink or swim. | 1.5274 | 0.02679 | 730 | 445 | 185 | 100 |
84 | I'll trade you some SPF 50 for a little WD-40. | 1.5272 | 0.02683 | 736 | 451 | 182 | 103 |
85 | The spear is more effective than a whistle. | 1.5265 | 0.02607 | 697 | 408 | 211 | 78 |
86 | I'm here in case they make it across the moat-- if they fall in it's up to you | 1.5265 | 0.02683 | 716 | 434 | 187 | 95 |
87 | When did we get new uniforms? | 1.5248 | 0.02670 | 686 | 408 | 196 | 82 |
88 | I prefer damsels in bikinis. | 1.5244 | 0.02468 | 677 | 377 | 245 | 55 |
89 | I'm working the knight shift. | 1.5241 | 0.02673 | 685 | 408 | 195 | 82 |
90 | I wish they all could be Canterbury girls. | 1.5237 | 0.02813 | 653 | 398 | 168 | 87 |
91 | You may be saving lives, but I am guarding a kingdom. | 1.5227 | 0.04754 | 220 | 132 | 61 | 27 |
92 | All they said was: " Guard the fort!!" | 1.5223 | 0.02679 | 649 | 380 | 199 | 70 |
93 | Perhaps I'm at the wrong castle? | 1.5214 | 0.02781 | 631 | 377 | 179 | 75 |
94 | WD-40. Yours? | 1.5194 | 0.02685 | 670 | 400 | 192 | 78 |
95 | It has the highest SPF rating. | 1.5145 | 0.02746 | 653 | 396 | 178 | 79 |
96 | You laugh,but wait till you have kids | 1.5131 | 0.02790 | 573 | 335 | 182 | 56 |
97 | I have very sensitive skin... | 1.5119 | 0.02743 | 590 | 345 | 188 | 57 |
98 | So, they go in the water on purpose? | 1.5116 | 0.02810 | 606 | 365 | 172 | 69 |
99 | ``High tide does what?'' | 1.5109 | 0.02806 | 640 | 394 | 165 | 81 |
100 | It looked bigger online | 1.5101 | 0.02884 | 596 | 365 | 158 | 73 |
101 | At least one of us takes the 'guard' part seriously | 1.5079 | 0.02703 | 630 | 376 | 188 | 66 |
102 | I'm useless for rescuing swimmers, but the moment that dragon shows up ... | 1.5075 | 0.02824 | 599 | 363 | 168 | 68 |
103 | ‘We’ll see who’s laughing when they come back to claim the castle.’ | 1.5052 | 0.02944 | 580 | 360 | 147 | 73 |
104 | Honestly, I thought knight shift was a typo. | 1.5036 | 0.03035 | 562 | 354 | 133 | 75 |
105 | Good thing you’re here. I’m a little rusty. | 1.5034 | 0.02764 | 590 | 352 | 179 | 59 |
106 | Wait, you’re here to SAVE the people in the water? | 1.5028 | 0.03041 | 529 | 326 | 140 | 63 |
107 | I was certified ages ago but I'm a bit rusty now. | 1.5000 | 0.02882 | 594 | 369 | 153 | 72 |
108 | I'll take marauding mythical creatures and sea-based sieges if you take any incident that requires treading water. | 1.5000 | 0.02882 | 554 | 335 | 161 | 58 |
109 | Actually, I was demoated... | 1.5000 | 0.03121 | 500 | 309 | 132 | 59 |
110 | So…do you love long walks on the beach and hot summer knights? | 1.4982 | 0.03133 | 544 | 350 | 117 | 77 |
111 | I was also surprised when they asked me to do a knight watch. | 1.4980 | 0.03110 | 494 | 304 | 134 | 56 |
112 | You ever get sand in your suit? | 1.4973 | 0.03042 | 563 | 359 | 128 | 76 |
113 | Moat, Castle, Guard. What don't you get? | 1.4962 | 0.02953 | 530 | 323 | 151 | 56 |
114 | Your husband calls me his wife guard. | 1.4945 | 0.03221 | 457 | 282 | 124 | 51 |
115 | I’m not used to saving lives. | 1.4922 | 0.03129 | 451 | 272 | 136 | 43 |
116 | Lancelot, what's yours | 1.4915 | 0.02949 | 531 | 326 | 149 | 56 |
117 | It's just a summer job. I start Knight School in the fall. | 1.4910 | 0.03151 | 499 | 315 | 123 | 61 |
118 | I was hoping for the knight shift | 1.4907 | 0.02944 | 538 | 332 | 148 | 58 |
119 | At least ONE of us takes sun protection seriously! | 1.4894 | 0.02994 | 517 | 319 | 143 | 55 |
120 | This is just my day job, I'm currently in knight school. | 1.4885 | 0.03151 | 520 | 335 | 116 | 69 |
121 | They call me the Prince of Tides. | 1.4878 | 0.03092 | 492 | 306 | 132 | 54 |
122 | The Queen built it when she was only five.It's been a steady job. | 1.4851 | 0.03008 | 470 | 283 | 146 | 41 |
123 | An inflatable dragon is headed this way. | 1.4839 | 0.03255 | 436 | 271 | 119 | 46 |
124 | Can you take the first rescue? I’m a little rusty. | 1.4838 | 0.03187 | 494 | 317 | 115 | 62 |
125 | I'm certified for damsels-in-distress. | 1.4832 | 0.03237 | 476 | 305 | 112 | 59 |
126 | I agree; ONE of us is dressed totally inappropriately for guard duty | 1.4831 | 0.03144 | 503 | 322 | 119 | 62 |
127 | I’m only here until the tide comes in. | 1.4822 | 0.03101 | 450 | 274 | 135 | 41 |
128 | I know, I want to jump on it too. | 1.4816 | 0.03314 | 434 | 274 | 111 | 49 |
129 | It's SPF 500 with the mask down. | 1.4814 | 0.03235 | 457 | 289 | 116 | 52 |
130 | Would you hold the fort. I'm going for a swim. | 1.4814 | 0.03190 | 457 | 286 | 122 | 49 |
131 | Serfs Up! better alert the king !! | 1.4811 | 0.03338 | 449 | 289 | 104 | 56 |
132 | I'm on knight shift until the serf comes in. | 1.4810 | 0.03277 | 501 | 332 | 97 | 72 |
133 | They said bring your own suit. They could have specified. | 1.4804 | 0.03124 | 485 | 306 | 125 | 54 |
134 | Now we wait. | 1.4803 | 0.03284 | 456 | 292 | 109 | 55 |
135 | Well, maybe you’re not taking your job seriously ENOUGH, Linda. | 1.4793 | 0.03152 | 482 | 306 | 121 | 55 |
136 | The training manual instructed us new lifeguards to wear Under Armour not body armor, you nitwit. | 1.4781 | 0.03255 | 456 | 291 | 112 | 53 |
137 | I feel overdressed | 1.4780 | 0.03128 | 454 | 281 | 129 | 44 |
138 | Nice to meet you Sandy - I'm Rusty. | 1.4779 | 0.03422 | 452 | 299 | 90 | 63 |
139 | Surely, you joust? Don't call me Shirley. | 1.4777 | 0.03369 | 404 | 253 | 109 | 42 |
140 | I got the moat, you watch the ocean. | 1.4771 | 0.03215 | 415 | 254 | 124 | 37 |
141 | I dress for the job I want, not the one I have. | 1.4769 | 0.03391 | 455 | 300 | 93 | 62 |
142 | Anyone can save a life, but to save a dynasty - whole other story.... | 1.4757 | 0.03321 | 412 | 258 | 112 | 42 |
143 | I'm here for the damsel in distress. You save everyone else. | 1.4755 | 0.03469 | 429 | 282 | 90 | 57 |
144 | My preferred pronoun is Sir. | 1.4716 | 0.03522 | 405 | 265 | 89 | 51 |
145 | OMG! You think they meant NIGHT shift? | 1.4693 | 0.03369 | 424 | 274 | 101 | 49 |
146 | Are you in distress by any chance? | 1.4688 | 0.03252 | 433 | 275 | 113 | 45 |
147 | Could you put polish on my back? | 1.4684 | 0.03281 | 459 | 300 | 103 | 56 |
148 | They told me the serf uprising is imminent. | 1.4681 | 0.03408 | 423 | 276 | 96 | 51 |
149 | I suppose after high tide I'll be looking for a new job. | 1.4678 | 0.03188 | 451 | 287 | 117 | 47 |
150 | I worked at the round table last summer too. | 1.4672 | 0.03341 | 396 | 249 | 109 | 38 |
151 | There may be a shortage of lifeguards, but there's no shortage of actors. | 1.4660 | 0.03265 | 412 | 259 | 114 | 39 |
152 | Shirley, you joust? | 1.4644 | 0.03472 | 407 | 267 | 91 | 49 |
153 | If they come by sea, you and I may have different objectives. | 1.4629 | 0.03563 | 337 | 211 | 96 | 30 |
154 | Serf's up! | 1.4619 | 0.03454 | 407 | 267 | 92 | 48 |
155 | I was certified by the Order of the Red Cross. | 1.4615 | 0.03396 | 390 | 249 | 102 | 39 |
156 | I think I'm out of my realm. | 1.4611 | 0.03466 | 373 | 238 | 98 | 37 |
157 | I have some oil, but no sunscreen. | 1.4611 | 0.03642 | 360 | 235 | 84 | 41 |
158 | Actually, I only cover the moat. | 1.4607 | 0.03346 | 382 | 240 | 108 | 34 |
159 | I signed up for serf guard | 1.4605 | 0.03199 | 430 | 273 | 116 | 41 |
160 | SPF 1225 AND you don't have to re-apply after 2 hours. | 1.4587 | 0.03422 | 412 | 271 | 93 | 48 |
161 | To be fair, you'd look pretty silly jousting in the suit you have on | 1.4585 | 0.03748 | 349 | 231 | 76 | 42 |
162 | I was laid off at White Castle | 1.4567 | 0.03472 | 381 | 247 | 94 | 40 |
163 | It's SPF 100, with the visor down. | 1.4565 | 0.03584 | 379 | 251 | 83 | 45 |
164 | I'm kind of having a Middle Age crisis. | 1.4562 | 0.03597 | 388 | 260 | 79 | 49 |
165 | The castle looked bigger online. | 1.4551 | 0.03735 | 345 | 228 | 77 | 40 |
166 | l'm waiting for my serf to come in! | 1.4545 | 0.03445 | 385 | 250 | 95 | 40 |
167 | Ever go to an all knight beach party? | 1.4538 | 0.03397 | 346 | 215 | 105 | 26 |
168 | I must protect my kingdom from the invading surfs | 1.4533 | 0.03631 | 364 | 241 | 81 | 42 |
169 | If the internship goes well, I could be looking at a bouncy castle by fall. | 1.4529 | 0.03705 | 340 | 223 | 80 | 37 |
170 | My parents are dermatologists. | 1.4508 | 0.03677 | 366 | 246 | 75 | 45 |
171 | You gotta admit it, since I've been here there have been no viking attacks. | 1.4507 | 0.03499 | 355 | 228 | 94 | 33 |
172 | I may need your help jumping the moat. I did not get a good knight's leap. | 1.4491 | 0.03631 | 334 | 216 | 86 | 32 |
173 | Why would you assume it's mine? | 1.4487 | 0.03732 | 312 | 201 | 82 | 29 |
174 | Sorry, you'll have to rescue him. I'm guarding the castle. | 1.4486 | 0.03580 | 350 | 228 | 87 | 35 |
175 | Of course no dragon's coming. I'm a strong deterrent. | 1.4476 | 0.03443 | 353 | 225 | 98 | 30 |
176 | I might need some help at high tide. | 1.4474 | 0.03422 | 342 | 215 | 101 | 26 |
177 | I know I'm here early, but this is my first time on the knight shift. | 1.4469 | 0.03521 | 358 | 233 | 90 | 35 |
178 | You might ask “Why is this knight different from all other nights?” | 1.4468 | 0.03866 | 329 | 222 | 67 | 40 |
179 | I built it, I'm gonna defend it. | 1.4466 | 0.03868 | 309 | 204 | 72 | 33 |
180 | I fear our empire is on the brink of collapse. | 1.4459 | 0.03403 | 388 | 254 | 95 | 39 |
181 | I just realized why pictures of knights are always in a shady forest. | 1.4455 | 0.03761 | 321 | 211 | 77 | 33 |
182 | Indeed, the threats come in waves." | 1.4455 | 0.03629 | 321 | 206 | 87 | 28 |
183 | When I handed him his spear, he replied, ‘thanks, Lance, a lot’ and the name just stuck from there | 1.4433 | 0.03923 | 300 | 199 | 69 | 32 |
184 | Rustproof, no. Sharkproof, yes." | 1.4419 | 0.03798 | 301 | 196 | 77 | 28 |
185 | Dress for the job you want, not the one you have | 1.4408 | 0.03967 | 304 | 205 | 64 | 35 |
186 | For our kingdom, dragons aren't as scary as climate change. | 1.4403 | 0.03568 | 318 | 203 | 90 | 25 |
187 | I am guarding the castle. You? | 1.4402 | 0.03513 | 368 | 244 | 86 | 38 |
188 | SPF 600 AD | 1.4395 | 0.03711 | 314 | 205 | 80 | 29 |
189 | I have first dibs on any damsel in distress. | 1.4394 | 0.03530 | 330 | 212 | 91 | 27 |
190 | I’m here because I have turrets syndrome. | 1.4394 | 0.03782 | 330 | 222 | 71 | 37 |
191 | SPF DCCVII | 1.4388 | 0.04008 | 294 | 198 | 63 | 33 |
192 | I was expecting a more important post, but I guess it's a start. | 1.4387 | 0.03346 | 367 | 236 | 101 | 30 |
193 | Why yes I do live with my mother. How did you know that? | 1.4360 | 0.03907 | 289 | 191 | 70 | 28 |
194 | It’s “surf’s” up not “serfs” up. | 1.4349 | 0.03495 | 361 | 239 | 87 | 35 |
195 | SPF 1000 with the visor down. | 1.4345 | 0.03717 | 313 | 206 | 78 | 29 |
196 | Well, I'd look pretty silly with just the spear, wouldn't I? | 1.4342 | 0.04018 | 281 | 188 | 64 | 29 |
197 | I've got the knight shift. | 1.4337 | 0.03689 | 332 | 222 | 76 | 34 |
198 | And that was the last time anyone kicked sand in my face. | 1.4323 | 0.03803 | 303 | 201 | 73 | 29 |
199 | I can't wait for that bully who kicks down sand castles to come back. | 1.4322 | 0.04003 | 273 | 181 | 66 | 26 |
200 | Could you help me put some WD-40 on my back? | 1.4315 | 0.03530 | 343 | 226 | 86 | 31 |
201 | You call it armor, but I call it SPF One Million. | 1.4314 | 0.03432 | 350 | 228 | 93 | 29 |
202 | You guard the coastline; I’ll defend the castle | 1.4309 | 0.03707 | 304 | 199 | 79 | 26 |
203 | On the otherhand, I pay almost nothing for sunscreen. | 1.4303 | 0.03574 | 337 | 223 | 83 | 31 |
204 | I’m afraid i’m going to get tin lines | 1.4300 | 0.03771 | 300 | 198 | 75 | 27 |
205 | Sunscreen doesn’t work for me anymore! | 1.4295 | 0.03582 | 319 | 208 | 85 | 26 |
206 | They claim UPF rating of 100 and shark resistant! | 1.4286 | 0.03828 | 287 | 189 | 73 | 25 |
207 | It’s the highest possible SPF. Protects against all UV rays and the Byzantine Empire | 1.4286 | 0.03809 | 329 | 226 | 65 | 38 |
208 | Laundry day. | 1.4276 | 0.03705 | 297 | 194 | 79 | 24 |
209 | If anyone goes under, you take it. I'm a bit rusty | 1.4241 | 0.03628 | 323 | 215 | 79 | 29 |
210 | You’ll never get this SPF with a lotion. | 1.4238 | 0.03456 | 328 | 213 | 91 | 24 |
211 | Let me share some advice: beware the tides of March. | 1.4237 | 0.03872 | 295 | 199 | 67 | 29 |
212 | So you guard lives? With a whistle? Okay weirdo." | 1.4225 | 0.03980 | 284 | 193 | 62 | 29 |
213 | It's a sustainable form of sunscreen. | 1.4216 | 0.03854 | 306 | 209 | 65 | 32 |
214 | I should have realized when the job description was in crayon. | 1.4211 | 0.05669 | 133 | 89 | 32 | 12 |
215 | Ever feel like you were born in the wrong Millenium? | 1.4209 | 0.03511 | 297 | 190 | 89 | 18 |
216 | I'm going on break. Can you defend the castle for me? | 1.4209 | 0.03944 | 278 | 187 | 65 | 26 |
217 | Are you in distress, by chance? | 1.4207 | 0.04050 | 271 | 184 | 60 | 27 |
218 | Sorry, you're on your own. The salty air has rusted my knees. | 1.4199 | 0.03880 | 281 | 188 | 68 | 25 |
219 | My friends call me the Prince of Tides. | 1.4199 | 0.03945 | 281 | 190 | 64 | 27 |
220 | Okay if I tell my friends about this one-knight stand? | 1.4199 | 0.03825 | 312 | 214 | 65 | 33 |
221 | Oh, I thought you said take the 'knight' shift. | 1.4180 | 0.03723 | 311 | 210 | 72 | 29 |
222 | Can you guard my castle for ten minutes? I have to change out of my suit. | 1.4180 | 0.03919 | 256 | 168 | 69 | 19 |
223 | I'm just here for the damsels.” | 1.4179 | 0.03788 | 280 | 185 | 73 | 22 |
224 | I save a ton on sunscreen. | 1.4172 | 0.03888 | 302 | 208 | 62 | 32 |
225 | Sharks? No. Children with buckets are our greatest threat. | 1.4161 | 0.04011 | 298 | 209 | 54 | 35 |
226 | Your eyes do not deceive. I am a knight in shining armor. | 1.4161 | 0.03861 | 286 | 193 | 67 | 26 |
227 | You obviously haven’t been warned about the kids on this beach. | 1.4161 | 0.03981 | 274 | 186 | 62 | 26 |
228 | Hot one today. | 1.4158 | 0.03962 | 279 | 190 | 62 | 27 |
229 | My dermatologist told me to avoid the sun and only go out at knight... | 1.4148 | 0.04057 | 270 | 185 | 58 | 27 |
230 | I haven’t been to the beach in ages. | 1.4148 | 0.03831 | 311 | 215 | 63 | 33 |
231 | My Empire does continue to diminish, but an oath is an oath. | 1.4147 | 0.03896 | 258 | 170 | 69 | 19 |
232 | With the lifeguard shortage, the pay is triple what I make jousting. | 1.4147 | 0.04085 | 258 | 175 | 59 | 24 |
233 | Of course I can swim! I'm more worried about getting down from this chair! | 1.4133 | 0.04011 | 271 | 185 | 60 | 26 |
234 | they gave me the knight shift | 1.4125 | 0.03761 | 303 | 206 | 69 | 28 |
235 | I didn't know Under Armor made bathing suits. | 1.4118 | 0.03701 | 289 | 192 | 75 | 22 |
236 | Let me know if you see anything unusual" | 1.4118 | 0.04033 | 272 | 187 | 58 | 27 |
237 | Well, no, it's actually more of a summer castle. | 1.4113 | 0.03821 | 265 | 175 | 71 | 19 |
238 | You know...they have sunscreen now. | 1.4104 | 0.04243 | 268 | 190 | 46 | 32 |
239 | Yeah, it's hard to swim in but the UV protection can't be beat. | 1.4103 | 0.03526 | 290 | 188 | 85 | 17 |
240 | Now I work re-moat-ly. | 1.4099 | 0.03949 | 283 | 195 | 60 | 28 |
241 | Since you ask, I'm searching for the holy pail. | 1.4096 | 0.03911 | 293 | 203 | 60 | 30 |
242 | Oh, it's just my summer job. I'm currently attending knight school." | 1.4088 | 0.03942 | 274 | 187 | 62 | 25 |
243 | I vowed to protect the realm from ruthless brigands, invading armies, and the occasional dude chasing a frisbee. | 1.4078 | 0.04038 | 255 | 173 | 60 | 22 |
244 | I'm a remoat worker. | 1.4078 | 0.04188 | 255 | 177 | 52 | 26 |
245 | I need to practice my life-saving skills, I'm a little rusty. | 1.4073 | 0.03930 | 275 | 188 | 62 | 25 |
246 | Got any WD 40? | 1.4064 | 0.04043 | 251 | 170 | 60 | 21 |
247 | The Sandcastle Guard test was surprisingly easy. | 1.4057 | 0.03966 | 281 | 195 | 58 | 28 |
248 | Also, I can't swim. | 1.4054 | 0.04174 | 259 | 181 | 51 | 27 |
249 | You don't see me questioning your career choices. | 1.4052 | 0.03991 | 269 | 185 | 59 | 25 |
250 | Me if by land You if by sea | 1.4052 | 0.04096 | 232 | 155 | 60 | 17 |
251 | Oh, night shift?" | 1.4047 | 0.03897 | 257 | 172 | 66 | 19 |
252 | Just to be clear, I’m only guarding the castle. | 1.4047 | 0.03974 | 257 | 174 | 62 | 21 |
253 | They kind of went overboard on the moat. | 1.4041 | 0.03731 | 292 | 198 | 70 | 24 |
254 | I'm better suited for the job. | 1.4037 | 0.03729 | 270 | 179 | 73 | 18 |
255 | My under armor is a speedo. | 1.4032 | 0.04231 | 248 | 173 | 50 | 25 |
256 | I’m strictly damsels. You take everything else. | 1.4024 | 0.03878 | 251 | 167 | 67 | 17 |
257 | Everyone has different rescue fantasies. | 1.4024 | 0.04156 | 251 | 174 | 53 | 24 |
258 | My shift started in 1279. | 1.4007 | 0.04113 | 267 | 188 | 51 | 28 |
259 | No, I'm not protecting the castle, I just burn easily. | 1.4007 | 0.03851 | 272 | 185 | 65 | 22 |
260 | You watch for sharks, I'll watch for dragons. | 1.4007 | 0.03629 | 307 | 209 | 73 | 25 |
261 | No, Im certain they said “steel yourself, the water is freezing!” | 1.3993 | 0.03840 | 273 | 186 | 65 | 22 |
262 | I have to run an errand; can you hold the fort? | 1.3992 | 0.04015 | 263 | 182 | 57 | 24 |
263 | Beware the Tides of June. | 1.3992 | 0.03996 | 258 | 177 | 59 | 22 |
264 | I hate it when you get sand in your suit. | 1.3992 | 0.04013 | 253 | 173 | 59 | 21 |
265 | I use a combo of SPF 50 and Quaker State. | 1.3992 | 0.03974 | 253 | 172 | 61 | 20 |
266 | But you wished for a romantic knight on the beach… | 1.3992 | 0.04275 | 238 | 166 | 49 | 23 |
267 | It's very tough to defend--but also very easy to rebuild. | 1.3985 | 0.03888 | 261 | 177 | 64 | 20 |
268 | Me? I get off at high tide | 1.3983 | 0.04194 | 241 | 167 | 52 | 22 |
269 | You're pretty hot, but I am sure I am hotter. | 1.3983 | 0.04041 | 236 | 159 | 60 | 17 |
270 | I’m taking knight classes online. | 1.3976 | 0.04097 | 249 | 172 | 55 | 22 |
271 | Dammit, I can’t believe I forgot it’s casual Friday | 1.3974 | 0.04240 | 234 | 162 | 51 | 21 |
272 | For me, it's not just guard duty. It's a crusade. | 1.3971 | 0.04551 | 209 | 146 | 43 | 20 |
273 | It was a difficult job market after the Crusade ended. | 1.3967 | 0.04097 | 242 | 166 | 56 | 20 |
274 | No one's inside. It's a shell company. | 1.3966 | 0.04285 | 237 | 166 | 48 | 23 |
275 | They were out of sunscreen. | 1.3962 | 0.04082 | 260 | 182 | 53 | 25 |
276 | The last time I was here it was Ages ago" | 1.3960 | 0.04503 | 202 | 139 | 46 | 17 |
277 | Some kid paid me to guard his castle. I know, but hey, it's the Hamptons. | 1.3958 | 0.04485 | 240 | 174 | 37 | 29 |
278 | I think we're going to need a bigger moat. | 1.3957 | 0.04139 | 235 | 161 | 55 | 19 |
279 | No, I said you have the NIGHT shift” | 1.3957 | 0.04311 | 235 | 165 | 47 | 23 |
280 | They asked me to take the knight shift. | 1.3956 | 0.03801 | 273 | 186 | 66 | 21 |
281 | Yeah, my dad got me this job too | 1.3947 | 0.04317 | 228 | 159 | 48 | 21 |
282 | On the plus side, I haven’t used sun screen in years.” | 1.3947 | 0.04088 | 228 | 154 | 58 | 16 |
283 | Sure, it’s tiny. But I’m the king of it. | 1.3938 | 0.04252 | 226 | 156 | 51 | 19 |
284 | I came with the castle. | 1.3933 | 0.03956 | 239 | 161 | 62 | 16 |
285 | You handle the swimmers; I'll take care of any dragons. | 1.3931 | 0.03909 | 262 | 180 | 61 | 21 |
286 | If there are sharks involved, let me handle it. | 1.3930 | 0.03924 | 257 | 176 | 61 | 20 |
287 | Trust me, this is easier than putting on sunscreen. | 1.3929 | 0.04278 | 224 | 155 | 50 | 19 |
288 | I'd rather be your knight in shining Speedo | 1.3926 | 0.03969 | 270 | 189 | 56 | 25 |
289 | Nothing to do with the sand castle. I just burn easily. | 1.3925 | 0.03951 | 265 | 184 | 58 | 23 |
290 | Just stick to your realm and I'll stick to mine." | 1.3922 | 0.03798 | 232 | 152 | 69 | 11 |
291 | To be honest, I’m a little rusty. | 1.3922 | 0.04521 | 204 | 142 | 44 | 18 |
292 | On the plus side, the armor is SPF 10,000. | 1.3920 | 0.04272 | 250 | 179 | 44 | 27 |
293 | I was told to dress for the job I want | 1.3920 | 0.04309 | 250 | 180 | 42 | 28 |
294 | Excellent UV protection. I'm a bit concerned about rust. | 1.3918 | 0.04098 | 245 | 170 | 54 | 21 |
295 | Like your empire is so stable. | 1.3915 | 0.04178 | 235 | 163 | 52 | 20 |
296 | You think they need both of us? | 1.3911 | 0.04169 | 225 | 154 | 54 | 17 |
297 | I've got the moat covered. You watch the ocean. | 1.3897 | 0.03910 | 272 | 190 | 58 | 24 |
298 | You must be Day. | 1.3896 | 0.04205 | 249 | 177 | 47 | 25 |
299 | I thought I was working the knightshift | 1.3891 | 0.03980 | 275 | 195 | 53 | 27 |
300 | I promised my kids I'd guard it. | 1.3884 | 0.04004 | 242 | 166 | 58 | 18 |
301 | I'm here on a quest to find the Holy Pail. Obviously. | 1.3883 | 0.04323 | 206 | 141 | 50 | 15 |
302 | I've rusted and I can't get I up. | 1.3876 | 0.04022 | 258 | 181 | 54 | 23 |
303 | Yeah, I'm a history major. | 1.3876 | 0.04115 | 209 | 140 | 57 | 12 |
304 | Just because I am suited for this job doesn't always mean I like it. | 1.3876 | 0.04489 | 209 | 147 | 43 | 19 |
305 | Background check? The best response to a bad shark in the water is an armored guy with a spear! | 1.3871 | 0.04169 | 217 | 148 | 54 | 15 |
306 | Ya it’s a little warm, but the SPF is like 3000 | 1.3870 | 0.04282 | 230 | 162 | 47 | 21 |
307 | The hiring manager said some knights were required. | 1.3867 | 0.04350 | 225 | 159 | 45 | 21 |
308 | In this housing market, this is all the king could afford to buy. | 1.3862 | 0.04588 | 189 | 131 | 43 | 15 |
309 | Fear not, fair maiden, for the tide is turning! | 1.3857 | 0.04209 | 210 | 143 | 53 | 14 |
310 | I'm dressing for the job I want. | 1.3849 | 0.04163 | 239 | 168 | 50 | 21 |
311 | Sorry, I only have metal polish. | 1.3846 | 0.04449 | 208 | 146 | 44 | 18 |
312 | I started looking for my summer quest too late. | 1.3839 | 0.04361 | 224 | 159 | 44 | 21 |
313 | I hope it's a quiet day, I feel a little rusty. | 1.3837 | 0.03879 | 245 | 167 | 62 | 16 |
314 | It's nothing to do with the castle. I'm allergic to sunblock. | 1.3836 | 0.04026 | 232 | 159 | 57 | 16 |
315 | I shall defend this kingdom until the very end! And then I'll probably grab some dinner. | 1.3836 | 0.04189 | 219 | 151 | 52 | 16 |
316 | The zinc oxide just wasn’t doing it anymore | 1.3831 | 0.04012 | 248 | 173 | 55 | 20 |
317 | I'm only here for the weekend covering for Don Quixote. | 1.3829 | 0.04388 | 222 | 158 | 43 | 21 |
318 | It’s got an SPF of 476 to circa 1350. | 1.3828 | 0.04379 | 209 | 146 | 46 | 17 |
319 | I’d swim, but I’m a bit rusty. | 1.3826 | 0.04187 | 230 | 161 | 50 | 19 |
320 | They told me to “Dress for the job you want” | 1.3822 | 0.03891 | 259 | 180 | 59 | 20 |
321 | “Rust-Oleum Spray-On with SPF 100.” | 1.3822 | 0.04158 | 225 | 156 | 52 | 17 |
322 | Watch out for rising serfs. | 1.3822 | 0.04252 | 225 | 158 | 48 | 19 |
323 | Are you sure they won’t attack from the land? | 1.3819 | 0.04533 | 199 | 140 | 42 | 17 |
324 | It’s SPF 50 BC | 1.3818 | 0.04272 | 220 | 154 | 48 | 18 |
325 | They expect me to swim? | 1.3814 | 0.04679 | 215 | 158 | 32 | 25 |
326 | Yes, buoyancy is an issue. | 1.3814 | 0.04240 | 215 | 149 | 50 | 16 |
327 | I fear the tide will turn | 1.3812 | 0.04316 | 202 | 139 | 49 | 14 |
328 | What makes you say I'm being over protective? | 1.3812 | 0.04134 | 223 | 154 | 53 | 16 |
329 | Dress for the job you want, Diane. | 1.3811 | 0.04179 | 244 | 174 | 47 | 23 |
330 | What is this tide you speak of? | 1.3805 | 0.04143 | 226 | 157 | 52 | 17 |
331 | If you can cover the water, I’ll protect the castle. | 1.3803 | 0.04369 | 213 | 150 | 45 | 18 |
332 | I'm on guard duty. Why are you here? | 1.3803 | 0.04369 | 213 | 150 | 45 | 18 |
333 | I should have worn a speedo. | 1.3802 | 0.04121 | 242 | 171 | 50 | 21 |
334 | Not what I was expecting when they said bring your suit | 1.3799 | 0.04104 | 229 | 159 | 53 | 17 |
335 | I understand it's your job to save them, but if they come near the castle it's my job to end them. | 1.3797 | 0.04551 | 187 | 130 | 43 | 14 |
336 | You just watch the water. I will guard the castle!! | 1.3795 | 0.04070 | 224 | 154 | 55 | 15 |
337 | Oh, you meant a dark and stormy night. | 1.3793 | 0.04855 | 174 | 123 | 36 | 15 |
338 | It was either this or a quest for the Holy Sippy Cup. | 1.3792 | 0.04144 | 240 | 170 | 49 | 21 |
339 | I didn’t know it would be a sand castle. | 1.3791 | 0.04240 | 211 | 146 | 50 | 15 |
340 | You take care of the swimmers. I'm here to defend the castle. | 1.3789 | 0.03840 | 256 | 177 | 61 | 18 |
341 | I'm only here until the moat fills in. | 1.3788 | 0.04489 | 198 | 139 | 43 | 16 |
342 | One more summer and I’ll have enough to buy my own horse. | 1.3786 | 0.04199 | 206 | 141 | 52 | 13 |
343 | Of course I put on sunscreen, what kind of nut do you think I am? | 1.3786 | 0.03980 | 243 | 169 | 56 | 18 |
344 | I'll get the ones who cross the moat, you take the ones who are drowning. | 1.3785 | 0.04146 | 214 | 147 | 53 | 14 |
345 | Are you also from the temp agency? | 1.3782 | 0.04510 | 193 | 135 | 43 | 15 |
346 | This is my first knight shift. | 1.3775 | 0.04393 | 204 | 143 | 45 | 16 |
347 | Let's just say it was not a promotion. | 1.3773 | 0.04118 | 220 | 152 | 53 | 15 |
348 | I'm just doing the knight shift | 1.3772 | 0.04297 | 228 | 163 | 44 | 21 |
349 | I go off duty at high tide. | 1.3772 | 0.04018 | 228 | 157 | 56 | 15 |
350 | I save a fortune on sunscreen. | 1.3766 | 0.03837 | 231 | 156 | 63 | 12 |
351 | Yeah, these kids have pretty rich parents. Why? | 1.3763 | 0.04432 | 194 | 135 | 45 | 14 |
352 | Can you go and save him? I’m rusted solid. | 1.3762 | 0.04356 | 210 | 148 | 45 | 17 |
353 | Dress for the job you want! | 1.3762 | 0.04459 | 210 | 150 | 41 | 19 |
354 | Wouldn't sunscreen work better? | 1.3761 | 0.04532 | 218 | 159 | 36 | 23 |
355 | You save the swimmers. I'll guard the castle. | 1.3761 | 0.04083 | 234 | 164 | 52 | 18 |
356 | This is high tide, right? Tell me it’s high tide. | 1.3757 | 0.04512 | 173 | 118 | 45 | 10 |
357 | So that’s what you’re wearing? | 1.3744 | 0.04177 | 219 | 153 | 50 | 16 |
358 | I work the knight shift. | 1.3738 | 0.04192 | 214 | 149 | 50 | 15 |
359 | You don't have to tell me how awkward it is to get sand "there." | 1.3738 | 0.04466 | 206 | 147 | 41 | 18 |
360 | You watch for people who fall into the moat. I'll watch for people who get past it. | 1.3737 | 0.04366 | 198 | 138 | 46 | 14 |
361 | Yeah, well, all roads lead away from Rome, too. | 1.3731 | 0.04544 | 201 | 144 | 39 | 18 |
362 | The saltwater wreaks havoc on my suit too. | 1.3723 | 0.04396 | 188 | 130 | 46 | 12 |
363 | Watch out for the serfs. | 1.3709 | 0.04356 | 213 | 152 | 43 | 18 |
364 | I’ll rescue damsels, you take everyone else. | 1.3706 | 0.04376 | 197 | 138 | 45 | 14 |
365 | What SPF do I use? Frankly, I’m partial to WD40. | 1.3704 | 0.04054 | 243 | 173 | 50 | 20 |
366 | If you build it they will come" so here I am | 1.3704 | 0.04108 | 216 | 150 | 52 | 14 |
367 | I'll let you do the next rescue. I'm a little rusty. | 1.3699 | 0.04270 | 219 | 156 | 45 | 18 |
368 | So, when does the pillaging start? | 1.3699 | 0.03965 | 219 | 150 | 57 | 12 |
369 | And then I said to the genie; "One really hot night with a lifeguard...", | 1.3695 | 0.04770 | 203 | 151 | 29 | 23 |
370 | I am here to make sure the river does not run through it. | 1.3692 | 0.04339 | 214 | 153 | 43 | 18 |
371 | I know why I'm here, but why are you here? | 1.3691 | 0.04176 | 233 | 167 | 46 | 20 |
372 | I'm on knightwatch. | 1.3689 | 0.04188 | 225 | 160 | 47 | 18 |
373 | No, what really bothers me is the corrosion. | 1.3687 | 0.04345 | 217 | 156 | 42 | 19 |
374 | Can you spare some oil? | 1.3687 | 0.04394 | 217 | 157 | 40 | 20 |
375 | 'I'm sorry, but I don't have any sunscreen.' | 1.3684 | 0.04484 | 190 | 134 | 42 | 14 |
376 | I too am trained in CPR. Castle Protection and Rescue. | 1.3684 | 0.04148 | 228 | 162 | 48 | 18 |
377 | You think you're hot! | 1.3678 | 0.04906 | 174 | 126 | 32 | 16 |
378 | You probably aren't vaccinated either. | 1.3676 | 0.04324 | 204 | 144 | 45 | 15 |
379 | Didn't anyone tell you this is a one knight stand? | 1.3674 | 0.04169 | 215 | 151 | 49 | 15 |
380 | If someone calls for help, I’ll guard the castle. | 1.3668 | 0.04398 | 199 | 141 | 43 | 15 |
381 | All quiet on the moat. How's the ocean? | 1.3668 | 0.04133 | 229 | 163 | 48 | 18 |
382 | You must be the day lifeguard. | 1.3665 | 0.04403 | 191 | 134 | 44 | 13 |
383 | Hopefully the dragon is to scale. | 1.3659 | 0.04576 | 205 | 150 | 35 | 20 |
384 | Doth the maiden have weekend plans? | 1.3645 | 0.04445 | 203 | 146 | 40 | 17 |
385 | I have a sinking feeling that the tide will win the battle. | 1.3645 | 0.04162 | 203 | 141 | 50 | 12 |
386 | You defend by sea, I'll defend by land. | 1.3645 | 0.04178 | 214 | 151 | 48 | 15 |
387 | I'm protecting the castle… What about you? | 1.3641 | 0.04397 | 195 | 138 | 43 | 14 |
388 | It’s not particularly comfortable but the SPF is off the chart. | 1.3641 | 0.04516 | 195 | 140 | 39 | 16 |
389 | Our last three outposts mysteriously disappeared. | 1.3636 | 0.04527 | 187 | 133 | 40 | 14 |
390 | I'm qualified to guard the castle because I have Turret's Syndrome. | 1.3636 | 0.04713 | 187 | 136 | 34 | 17 |
391 | Yeah, it gets kind of hot, but it's also rated at SPF 9000. | 1.3631 | 0.04390 | 179 | 124 | 45 | 10 |
392 | No, I don’t need sun block. | 1.3627 | 0.04087 | 204 | 141 | 52 | 11 |
393 | Surely you joust. | 1.3627 | 0.04547 | 193 | 139 | 38 | 16 |
394 | Our position is under threat, but we may yet turn the tide. | 1.3622 | 0.04196 | 196 | 136 | 49 | 11 |
395 | Someone needs to protect our eroding shorelines. | 1.3622 | 0.04258 | 196 | 137 | 47 | 12 |
396 | Actually, it was built in a day. | 1.3620 | 0.04909 | 163 | 117 | 33 | 13 |
397 | I've got the castle; the rest of the beach is yours. | 1.3619 | 0.04335 | 210 | 151 | 42 | 17 |
398 | Stones and mortar, I tell them, but do they listen? | 1.3613 | 0.04518 | 191 | 137 | 39 | 15 |
399 | It prevents tan lines. | 1.3612 | 0.04151 | 227 | 163 | 46 | 18 |
400 | I don't know how you expect to defend the kingdom in that outfit | 1.3610 | 0.04186 | 205 | 144 | 48 | 13 |
401 | Would you like to go out for a mead later?" | 1.3608 | 0.04222 | 194 | 135 | 48 | 11 |
402 | Not everything is about saving lives Diane, guarding property is important too. | 1.3602 | 0.04318 | 211 | 152 | 42 | 17 |
403 | But I save a lot on sunscreen! | 1.3602 | 0.03901 | 236 | 166 | 55 | 15 |
404 | My official title is Prince of Tides. | 1.3600 | 0.04486 | 200 | 145 | 38 | 17 |
405 | I fear a hostile takeover by that kid with the green shovel. | 1.3598 | 0.04223 | 214 | 153 | 45 | 16 |
406 | My kingdom for some of your sunscreen. | 1.3590 | 0.04267 | 195 | 137 | 46 | 12 |
407 | You take anyone drowning out of range, I can only go two steps forward and one to the side. | 1.3590 | 0.04267 | 195 | 137 | 46 | 12 |
408 | Do you want to get some mead later? | 1.3586 | 0.04342 | 198 | 141 | 43 | 14 |
409 | Do you have any oil?" | 1.3586 | 0.04516 | 198 | 144 | 37 | 17 |
410 | You go, I’m a little rusty! | 1.3585 | 0.04828 | 159 | 113 | 35 | 11 |
411 | It’s SPF LXI. | 1.3580 | 0.04916 | 176 | 130 | 29 | 17 |
412 | My moat or yours? | 1.3580 | 0.04430 | 176 | 123 | 43 | 10 |
413 | Yes, I WAS hired by "The Lady of the Lake" how did you know? | 1.3575 | 0.04451 | 179 | 126 | 42 | 11 |
414 | And then I said ‘my lord I beseech thee’ but he misheard. | 1.3575 | 0.04855 | 179 | 132 | 30 | 17 |
415 | I thought it would be a lot bigger than this. | 1.3571 | 0.04934 | 154 | 110 | 33 | 11 |
416 | Bear with me, I’m a little rusty. | 1.3571 | 0.04536 | 182 | 130 | 39 | 13 |
417 | Our King just turned 5 | 1.3571 | 0.04370 | 196 | 140 | 42 | 14 |
418 | Will you watch the castle for a minute? I have to see a man about a horse. | 1.3568 | 0.04284 | 213 | 154 | 42 | 17 |
419 | You rescue the swimmers. My job is defending the castle. | 1.3568 | 0.04677 | 185 | 135 | 34 | 16 |
420 | Me?...I'm here to guard the castle. | 1.3564 | 0.04042 | 202 | 140 | 52 | 10 |
421 | Here be dragons. Just saying. | 1.3559 | 0.04410 | 177 | 124 | 43 | 10 |
422 | Think the moat will hold? | 1.3553 | 0.03986 | 228 | 162 | 51 | 15 |
423 | S.P.F. 1,000. That's why. | 1.3550 | 0.04247 | 200 | 142 | 45 | 13 |
424 | Rich kids pay well | 1.3545 | 0.04350 | 189 | 134 | 43 | 12 |
425 | I've successfully defended it since I was six. | 1.3537 | 0.05098 | 164 | 122 | 26 | 16 |
426 | Thanks, but I’m still thinking it needed a bigger moat. | 1.3536 | 0.04479 | 181 | 129 | 40 | 12 |
427 | All I know is some kid's dad hired me to guard it for his beach birthday! | 1.3522 | 0.04816 | 159 | 114 | 34 | 11 |
428 | My shift is over at high tide. What about you? | 1.3519 | 0.04913 | 162 | 118 | 31 | 13 |
429 | I’m Irish. It’s either this or SPF 10,000. | 1.3518 | 0.04655 | 199 | 149 | 30 | 20 |
430 | You take care of the drowning and I take care of the barbarians, ok? | 1.3518 | 0.04135 | 199 | 140 | 48 | 11 |
431 | Once I shut the helmet, it's SPF 100. | 1.3518 | 0.04196 | 199 | 141 | 46 | 12 |
432 | I think my interview at Little Caesars went pretty well | 1.3518 | 0.04196 | 199 | 141 | 46 | 12 |
433 | I was wondering if you might be in distress | 1.3516 | 0.04250 | 182 | 127 | 46 | 9 |
434 | Sometimes I feel like I'm only here for decoration. | 1.3512 | 0.04635 | 168 | 120 | 37 | 11 |
435 | Do you have any WD40? I can't move my arms. | 1.3506 | 0.04809 | 174 | 128 | 31 | 15 |
436 | Yeah, guard skills are more transferable than you think | 1.3506 | 0.04524 | 174 | 124 | 39 | 11 |
437 | My lord's castle used to be twelve miles inland. | 1.3503 | 0.04682 | 177 | 129 | 34 | 14 |
438 | This was the only castle hiring. | 1.3503 | 0.04343 | 197 | 142 | 41 | 14 |
439 | The job gets harder in a few hours. | 1.3500 | 0.03920 | 220 | 155 | 53 | 12 |
440 | Someday all of that will be mine. | 1.3495 | 0.04210 | 206 | 148 | 44 | 14 |
441 | Can I count on you for help when the tide comes in ? | 1.3494 | 0.04591 | 166 | 118 | 38 | 10 |
442 | Pays much better than chivalry, especially this summer. | 1.3491 | 0.04763 | 169 | 123 | 33 | 13 |
443 | I thought the posting said "Night Watchman" | 1.3490 | 0.04357 | 192 | 138 | 41 | 13 |
444 | I see your suit is Under Armour; mine is simply armour. | 1.3486 | 0.04575 | 175 | 126 | 37 | 12 |
445 | I time traveled for this?! | 1.3486 | 0.04503 | 175 | 125 | 39 | 11 |
446 | Beachfront property is worth protecting at all costs. | 1.3485 | 0.04442 | 198 | 145 | 37 | 16 |
447 | My wife thinks I'm golfing. And sober. | 1.3481 | 0.04994 | 158 | 116 | 29 | 13 |
448 | Then I said: "The moat the merrier." and they assigned me here. | 1.3476 | 0.04259 | 210 | 153 | 41 | 16 |
449 | It does slow me down, but sharks are no longer a problem. | 1.3476 | 0.04435 | 187 | 135 | 39 | 13 |
450 | OK, I’m up. We’re all good. | 1.3476 | 0.04625 | 164 | 117 | 37 | 10 |
451 | Yeah, I have to oil the joints, but I don't need sunscreen. | 1.3472 | 0.04338 | 193 | 139 | 41 | 13 |
452 | WD40 works best for me | 1.3472 | 0.04212 | 193 | 137 | 45 | 11 |
453 | Your Match.com profile mentioned that your favorite film was Camelot... | 1.3471 | 0.04513 | 170 | 121 | 39 | 10 |
454 | Anyway, my therapist thinks I struggle with letting my guard down. | 1.3469 | 0.04471 | 196 | 144 | 36 | 16 |
455 | I guard as my king commands, but I’m starting to think he must have meant a different castle | 1.3467 | 0.04247 | 199 | 143 | 43 | 13 |
456 | I'll protect the castle; you protect the water. | 1.3464 | 0.04569 | 179 | 130 | 36 | 13 |
457 | I'm only on duty until high tide takes out the castle. | 1.3462 | 0.03947 | 208 | 146 | 52 | 10 |
458 | This spear actually unfolds into an umbrella | 1.3462 | 0.04868 | 156 | 113 | 32 | 11 |
459 | I can put sunscreen on your back if you WD 40 my joints. | 1.3459 | 0.04465 | 185 | 134 | 38 | 13 |
460 | I'm worried that my SPF 5000 might make it tough to swim. | 1.3459 | 0.04331 | 185 | 132 | 42 | 11 |
461 | It's a compensatory tool according to my therapist. | 1.3459 | 0.04635 | 159 | 113 | 37 | 9 |
462 | The armor does makes it harder to swim, but the SPF factor is off the charts. | 1.3455 | 0.04173 | 191 | 135 | 46 | 10 |
463 | I have to guard this stupid sandcastle. What's your excuse? | 1.3450 | 0.04642 | 171 | 124 | 35 | 12 |
464 | Yeah it’s hot but I save a ton on sunblock | 1.3450 | 0.04859 | 171 | 127 | 29 | 15 |
465 | I'm having second thoughts about joining a fraternity. | 1.3448 | 0.04301 | 203 | 148 | 40 | 15 |
466 | You handle the ocean and I'll take the moat. | 1.3448 | 0.04513 | 174 | 125 | 38 | 11 |
467 | Tell me again how you are going to defend the castle from toddlers without getting sued? | 1.3448 | 0.04244 | 203 | 147 | 42 | 14 |
468 | Well you said we'd be guarding the castle. What did you think I'd wear? | 1.3448 | 0.04363 | 174 | 123 | 42 | 9 |
469 | You're not taking guard duty very seriously. | 1.3448 | 0.04729 | 174 | 128 | 32 | 14 |
470 | Oh, part-time. I'm between invasions. | 1.3445 | 0.04159 | 209 | 151 | 44 | 14 |
471 | The kids knighted me and then ran off. | 1.3443 | 0.04627 | 183 | 135 | 33 | 15 |
472 | They let you choose your suit? | 1.3441 | 0.04637 | 186 | 138 | 32 | 16 |
473 | I only guard the castles. You keep your eye on the ocean. | 1.3438 | 0.04284 | 192 | 138 | 42 | 12 |
474 | I was told that I would need protection from the Sun. | 1.3434 | 0.04736 | 166 | 121 | 33 | 12 |
475 | You got a 9 to 5, so I’ll take the knight shift. | 1.3432 | 0.04897 | 169 | 126 | 28 | 15 |
476 | You guard your way, I'll guard mine. | 1.3429 | 0.04706 | 175 | 129 | 32 | 14 |
477 | Can we agree that everyone in a Speedo is the enemy? | 1.3425 | 0.04458 | 181 | 131 | 38 | 12 |
478 | Whaddya mean, “Knights in shining armor are so 12th century”? | 1.3421 | 0.04501 | 190 | 140 | 35 | 15 |
479 | If a rescue involves going in the water, I think it best that you handle it. | 1.3420 | 0.04390 | 193 | 141 | 38 | 14 |
480 | Sharks? No, I'm just overseeing the imminent destruction of an empire. | 1.3418 | 0.04462 | 196 | 145 | 35 | 16 |
481 | Sorry sometimes my son takes things way to far | 1.3416 | 0.04671 | 161 | 116 | 35 | 10 |
482 | I told them I wanted night work! | 1.3416 | 0.04423 | 202 | 150 | 35 | 17 |
483 | Well, actually, it's a representation of my lord's castle. I'm working remotely. | 1.3412 | 0.04873 | 170 | 127 | 28 | 15 |
484 | This? Oh, it's SPF 1450. | 1.3409 | 0.04613 | 176 | 129 | 34 | 13 |
485 | The toughest part is, the moat makes me want to pee." | 1.3409 | 0.04887 | 176 | 133 | 26 | 17 |
486 | No rescues, got bored, what can I say? | 1.3404 | 0.04469 | 188 | 138 | 36 | 14 |
487 | Just letting you know - I’m not getting this suit wet. | 1.3404 | 0.04595 | 188 | 140 | 32 | 16 |
488 | Why do you think I added a moat? | 1.3401 | 0.04501 | 197 | 147 | 33 | 17 |
489 | Not to worry, it has flood insurance. | 1.3400 | 0.04160 | 200 | 144 | 44 | 12 |
490 | Can you put a little oil on my back? | 1.3400 | 0.04038 | 200 | 142 | 48 | 10 |
491 | Have you ever entered The New Yorker Caption Contest? | 1.3392 | 0.04919 | 171 | 129 | 26 | 16 |
492 | This used to attract girls. Once upon a time. | 1.3391 | 0.04647 | 174 | 128 | 33 | 13 |
493 | Why, yes, this is SPF 1560. | 1.3391 | 0.04647 | 174 | 128 | 33 | 13 |
494 | Well yes, I'm able to bronze without sunscreen. | 1.3390 | 0.04660 | 177 | 131 | 32 | 14 |
495 | I consider this my starter castle. | 1.3390 | 0.04376 | 177 | 127 | 40 | 10 |
496 | Yes, I'm hot! | 1.3389 | 0.04398 | 180 | 130 | 39 | 11 |
497 | The kid's a Bitcoin Billionaire so I get paid a LOT to wear this and guard his castle. | 1.3384 | 0.04185 | 198 | 143 | 43 | 12 |
498 | I thought they said “suit up?” | 1.3381 | 0.05060 | 139 | 101 | 29 | 9 |
499 | This is the only suit I have. | 1.3377 | 0.04688 | 151 | 108 | 35 | 8 |
500 | Sunblock is overrated. | 1.3377 | 0.04593 | 151 | 107 | 37 | 7 |
501 | Nice suit! | 1.3374 | 0.04541 | 163 | 117 | 37 | 9 |
502 | Thanks for holding the fort | 1.3371 | 0.04480 | 175 | 127 | 37 | 11 |
503 | I think the place is a little misleading from the brochures | 1.3371 | 0.04499 | 178 | 130 | 36 | 12 |
504 | Wait, this is low tide? | 1.3370 | 0.04329 | 184 | 133 | 40 | 11 |
505 | Would you mind watching my fiefdom while I take a leek? | 1.3369 | 0.04543 | 187 | 139 | 33 | 15 |
506 | Darn it. I hate getting all suited up, and then nature calls. Can you mind the fort for a while? | 1.3368 | 0.04236 | 190 | 137 | 42 | 11 |
507 | I hope no one is drowning. I'm a little rusty. | 1.3367 | 0.04168 | 199 | 144 | 43 | 12 |
508 | When you drop out of knight school you don't have many choices. | 1.3356 | 0.05076 | 146 | 108 | 27 | 11 |
509 | I'll be out of a job once the tide comes in. | 1.3354 | 0.04658 | 161 | 117 | 34 | 10 |
510 | The job description said was to guard a castle! | 1.3353 | 0.04622 | 167 | 122 | 34 | 11 |
511 | Don't waste your time: the crocodiles will get them before they drown. | 1.3353 | 0.04585 | 173 | 127 | 34 | 12 |
512 | One big wave and I'm out of a job. | 1.3353 | 0.04658 | 173 | 128 | 32 | 13 |
513 | I only save damsels. | 1.3352 | 0.03839 | 182 | 125 | 53 | 4 |
514 | Doth ye’ not care for thy skin? | 1.3352 | 0.04693 | 182 | 137 | 29 | 16 |
515 | You take the ocean, and I'll take the castle. | 1.3352 | 0.04216 | 182 | 130 | 43 | 9 |
516 | Of course I’ll see you tomorrow. I’ve rusted in place. | 1.3333 | 0.04414 | 198 | 148 | 34 | 16 |
517 | The king said he wouldn't hire me without any experience. | 1.3333 | 0.04183 | 174 | 123 | 44 | 7 |
518 | I had been working re-moatly. | 1.3333 | 0.04634 | 162 | 118 | 34 | 10 |
519 | A deeper moat, now that you mention it, would’ve been a pretty good idea. | 1.3333 | 0.04550 | 162 | 117 | 36 | 9 |
520 | Things get dicey at high tide. | 1.3333 | 0.04521 | 168 | 122 | 36 | 10 |
521 | Can you watch my castle for twenty minutes? I need to pee. | 1.3333 | 0.04338 | 183 | 133 | 39 | 11 |
522 | What can I say, the kid gave me $100 to guard his castle." | 1.3333 | 0.04826 | 168 | 126 | 28 | 14 |
523 | I'll save the fair maidens. You can save everyone else. | 1.3333 | 0.04796 | 162 | 120 | 30 | 12 |
524 | I've got the moat. | 1.3333 | 0.04467 | 171 | 124 | 37 | 10 |
525 | It's called Remoat Control. | 1.3333 | 0.04474 | 183 | 135 | 35 | 13 |
526 | Attila is on his way and that's all you're wearing? | 1.3333 | 0.04415 | 174 | 126 | 38 | 10 |
527 | Try to ask again without sounding so judgy. | 1.3333 | 0.04602 | 150 | 107 | 36 | 7 |
528 | Honestly, lifeguarding is not a job for the middle-aged. | 1.3333 | 0.05009 | 156 | 117 | 26 | 13 |
529 | I'll take moat rescues, you take the rest. | 1.3333 | 0.04277 | 168 | 119 | 42 | 7 |
530 | You rescue the commoners. I'll stay ashore defending the 1% | 1.3333 | 0.04457 | 180 | 132 | 36 | 12 |
531 | Hot one today, huh? | 1.3333 | 0.04495 | 165 | 119 | 37 | 9 |
532 | Knight takes rook | 1.3333 | 0.04635 | 174 | 129 | 32 | 13 |
533 | The armor might be overkill, but the sun protection factor is off the charts. | 1.3316 | 0.04419 | 190 | 141 | 35 | 14 |
534 | You save the swimmers. I'll save the Queen. | 1.3315 | 0.04249 | 184 | 133 | 41 | 10 |
535 | The prices of real estate force everyone to downsize. | 1.3315 | 0.04585 | 184 | 138 | 31 | 15 |
536 | Dost thou save castles too? | 1.3314 | 0.04541 | 175 | 129 | 34 | 12 |
537 | It's the original sun block. | 1.3314 | 0.04289 | 172 | 123 | 41 | 8 |
538 | My contract only covers the damsels in distress. | 1.3313 | 0.04133 | 166 | 116 | 45 | 5 |
539 | The construction was completely funded with sand dollars. | 1.3313 | 0.04610 | 163 | 119 | 34 | 10 |
540 | The thought of a water rescue really gives me a sinking feeling. | 1.3313 | 0.04927 | 163 | 123 | 26 | 14 |
541 | Heavy? Yeah. But it's the holy grail of sunscreen. | 1.3313 | 0.04752 | 160 | 118 | 31 | 11 |
542 | Check, your move | 1.3312 | 0.04729 | 157 | 115 | 32 | 10 |
543 | It's not a moat, damnit, it's a line in the sand. | 1.3310 | 0.04800 | 145 | 105 | 32 | 8 |
544 | I was demoated. | 1.3310 | 0.04969 | 142 | 104 | 29 | 9 |
545 | Didn't anyone tell you about the dress code? | 1.3300 | 0.04099 | 203 | 148 | 43 | 12 |
546 | I’ll need your help at high tide. | 1.3299 | 0.04365 | 197 | 147 | 35 | 15 |
547 | Anybody in the moat is my problem. | 1.3297 | 0.04298 | 185 | 135 | 39 | 11 |
548 | It was the only way I could get re-moat work as a knight-watchman. | 1.3296 | 0.04395 | 179 | 131 | 37 | 11 |
549 | I could've done better but I'm a little rusty. | 1.3295 | 0.04446 | 176 | 129 | 36 | 11 |
550 | I’m just the lifeguard for people who swim in the moat. | 1.3295 | 0.04446 | 176 | 129 | 36 | 11 |
551 | You gotta wait 30 minutes after jousting before swimming. | 1.3293 | 0.04420 | 164 | 118 | 38 | 8 |
552 | On guard? | 1.3291 | 0.04789 | 158 | 117 | 30 | 11 |
553 | Im directing the siege. | 1.3290 | 0.04587 | 155 | 112 | 35 | 8 |
554 | How am I mansplaining? | 1.3289 | 0.04920 | 152 | 113 | 28 | 11 |
555 | I used to work at the food court. | 1.3289 | 0.04646 | 152 | 110 | 34 | 8 |
556 | A caption! A caption! My kingdom for a caption! | 1.3280 | 0.04542 | 186 | 140 | 31 | 15 |
557 | Are you sure you’re not in distress? | 1.3277 | 0.04637 | 177 | 133 | 30 | 14 |
558 | This and $500K from my parents got me in to U.S.C. | 1.3275 | 0.04606 | 171 | 127 | 32 | 12 |
559 | Just the fair maidens. I watch the tanned ones drown.” | 1.3273 | 0.04876 | 165 | 125 | 26 | 14 |
560 | Sunscreen? | 1.3272 | 0.04620 | 162 | 119 | 33 | 10 |
561 | Used to be that we would just let the crocs take care of the swimmers | 1.3272 | 0.04783 | 162 | 121 | 29 | 12 |
562 | I’m going to arrest that guy. This area is swimming only and he keeps walking on the water. | 1.3272 | 0.04940 | 162 | 123 | 25 | 14 |
563 | I guess Rome was built in a day | 1.3272 | 0.04783 | 162 | 121 | 29 | 12 |
564 | 100% UVA proof. Try it! | 1.3266 | 0.04268 | 199 | 148 | 37 | 14 |
565 | They told me I'd be protecting a castle. They didn't tell me it was a sand castle. | 1.3265 | 0.04938 | 147 | 109 | 28 | 10 |
566 | ...so then I enrolled in knight school. | 1.3264 | 0.05105 | 144 | 108 | 25 | 11 |
567 | You may think I look silly, but this armor is SPF 500. | 1.3263 | 0.04214 | 190 | 139 | 40 | 11 |
568 | To be honest, all I heard was “guard” and “castle”. | 1.3262 | 0.04122 | 187 | 135 | 43 | 9 |
569 | I'll protect the castle if you save anyone who falls into the moat. | 1.3262 | 0.04457 | 187 | 140 | 33 | 14 |
570 | What can I say? This is the Hamptons. People are very protective of their real estate. | 1.3261 | 0.04618 | 138 | 98 | 35 | 5 |
571 | Is it hot out here, or is it just me? | 1.3261 | 0.04237 | 184 | 134 | 40 | 10 |
572 | Yes, it is like a sauna in here... | 1.3256 | 0.04432 | 172 | 126 | 36 | 10 |
573 | But what I really want to do is direct. | 1.3256 | 0.04432 | 172 | 126 | 36 | 10 |
574 | It was either this or sunscreen. | 1.3253 | 0.04619 | 166 | 123 | 32 | 11 |
575 | You can play the damsel in distress | 1.3250 | 0.04738 | 160 | 119 | 30 | 11 |
576 | I guard against knight swimmers | 1.3250 | 0.04820 | 160 | 120 | 28 | 12 |
577 | Look, factor 30 will only protect you from the sun for so long. | 1.3248 | 0.04714 | 157 | 116 | 31 | 10 |
578 | It’s hard to get off at the end of the day, but you can’t beat SPF 1600. | 1.3247 | 0.04402 | 194 | 146 | 33 | 15 |
579 | One of us might be redundant." | 1.3247 | 0.04777 | 154 | 114 | 30 | 10 |
580 | I got the beach, you watch the water. | 1.3243 | 0.04909 | 148 | 110 | 28 | 10 |
581 | So when Ted Cruz tried to introduce himself, I held my breath and pretended to be a cell phone tower. | 1.3243 | 0.05002 | 148 | 111 | 26 | 11 |
582 | I'm watching it for a friend. | 1.3240 | 0.04163 | 179 | 129 | 42 | 8 |
583 | Have you seen my seahorse? | 1.3239 | 0.05150 | 142 | 107 | 24 | 11 |
584 | I’ll watch the castle, you watch the moat. | 1.3237 | 0.04094 | 173 | 123 | 44 | 6 |
585 | No. The size of a knight’s manhood isn’t proportional to the size of his castle | 1.3237 | 0.04633 | 173 | 130 | 30 | 13 |
586 | I gotta pee. Watch my castle.... | 1.3235 | 0.04764 | 170 | 129 | 27 | 14 |
587 | I’m ready for the Trojan seahorse! | 1.3235 | 0.04462 | 170 | 125 | 35 | 10 |
588 | They wanted me to start out small. | 1.3234 | 0.04595 | 167 | 124 | 32 | 11 |
589 | You watch for sharks. I’ll watch for damsels in distress. | 1.3234 | 0.04595 | 167 | 124 | 32 | 11 |
590 | A cold beer, a cold beer! My kingdom for a cold beer! | 1.3230 | 0.05031 | 161 | 124 | 22 | 15 |
591 | We started with Civil War re-enactments | 1.3229 | 0.04242 | 192 | 142 | 38 | 12 |
592 | I'll be irrelevant in like fifteen minutes. When are you free? | 1.3228 | 0.04602 | 158 | 116 | 33 | 9 |
593 | Our spies warn of invasion by sea. | 1.3226 | 0.04401 | 186 | 139 | 34 | 13 |
594 | Is that all you're wearing? | 1.3224 | 0.04451 | 183 | 137 | 33 | 13 |
595 | Look, you save the swimmers, I'll guard the castle. | 1.3224 | 0.04535 | 152 | 110 | 35 | 7 |
596 | I have "Turrets Syndrome." | 1.3224 | 0.04992 | 152 | 115 | 25 | 12 |
597 | It’s actually a huge step up from dungeon master. | 1.3224 | 0.04992 | 152 | 115 | 25 | 12 |
598 | The women wanted to be rescued by a knight in shining armor. | 1.3221 | 0.05063 | 149 | 113 | 24 | 12 |
599 | Royal assignment from the king. You? | 1.3221 | 0.04973 | 149 | 112 | 26 | 11 |
600 | I'll only rescue the damsels in distress. The rest are yours! | 1.3220 | 0.03952 | 177 | 125 | 47 | 5 |
601 | You save 'em your way, and I'll save 'em mine. | 1.3219 | 0.04755 | 146 | 107 | 31 | 8 |
602 | 100% SPF and confuses the seagulls. | 1.3219 | 0.04755 | 146 | 107 | 31 | 8 |
603 | Dibs on damsels in distress. | 1.3216 | 0.04282 | 171 | 124 | 39 | 8 |
604 | On the next episode of Medievel Baywatch . . . | 1.3216 | 0.04740 | 171 | 130 | 27 | 14 |
605 | And you’re guarding…what? | 1.3214 | 0.04784 | 140 | 102 | 31 | 7 |
606 | This is just a part time summer gig, I work re-moat-ly during the week. | 1.3212 | 0.04862 | 165 | 126 | 25 | 14 |
607 | Marauding toddlers are the biggest threat | 1.3212 | 0.04962 | 137 | 101 | 28 | 8 |
608 | I think I misinterpreted the role of 'lifeguard'. | 1.3208 | 0.04664 | 159 | 118 | 31 | 10 |
609 | I ran out of sunscreen. | 1.3204 | 0.04198 | 181 | 132 | 40 | 9 |
610 | I'd like to add a drawbridge but I'm a little rusty. | 1.3203 | 0.04877 | 153 | 115 | 27 | 11 |
611 | This is one of the few jobs available in my field. | 1.3203 | 0.04697 | 153 | 113 | 31 | 9 |
612 | Doesn't matter, I can't swim anyway. | 1.3200 | 0.04665 | 150 | 110 | 32 | 8 |
613 | You guard the shore line, and I’ll take care of the moat. | 1.3200 | 0.04214 | 175 | 127 | 40 | 8 |
614 | It’s one thing to build a castle. It’s another to defend it. | 1.3198 | 0.04418 | 172 | 127 | 35 | 10 |
615 | You said you loved Summer Knights | 1.3198 | 0.04418 | 172 | 127 | 35 | 10 |
616 | Pillaging just wasn't working out. | 1.3194 | 0.04691 | 144 | 105 | 32 | 7 |
617 | You protect the swimmers, I'll guard the castle! | 1.3193 | 0.04276 | 166 | 120 | 39 | 7 |
618 | I'm keeping an eye out for wooden seahorses. | 1.3191 | 0.04614 | 188 | 145 | 26 | 17 |
619 | Yes, I get the pun … feudal and futile . | 1.3190 | 0.04743 | 163 | 123 | 28 | 12 |
620 | I once had a mackerel stuck in my breastplate. | 1.3189 | 0.04274 | 185 | 137 | 37 | 11 |
621 | Your shield has a hole in it. | 1.3188 | 0.05141 | 138 | 104 | 24 | 10 |
622 | What do you mean it's going to be a volleyball tournament? | 1.3188 | 0.05141 | 138 | 104 | 24 | 10 |
623 | His father hired me after FEMA declined to insure it. | 1.3188 | 0.04553 | 160 | 118 | 33 | 9 |
624 | I’m more of a fief guard. | 1.3185 | 0.05114 | 135 | 101 | 25 | 9 |
625 | Well, you know. "Dress for the job you want..." | 1.3185 | 0.05221 | 135 | 102 | 23 | 10 |
626 | We lost funding for the Renaissance Faire. | 1.3185 | 0.04611 | 157 | 116 | 32 | 9 |
627 | I'm the Knight Watch. | 1.3184 | 0.04298 | 179 | 132 | 37 | 10 |
628 | Alright, I’ll take the knight shift. | 1.3184 | 0.04441 | 179 | 134 | 33 | 12 |
629 | They don’t let you just go slay dragons right away, you have to start at the bottom. | 1.3182 | 0.04761 | 154 | 115 | 29 | 10 |
630 | Honestly, the moat does most of the work. | 1.3182 | 0.04849 | 154 | 116 | 27 | 11 |
631 | It’s just a starter castle. | 1.3182 | 0.04346 | 176 | 130 | 36 | 10 |
632 | Jimmy'll be back after a short siege on Nathan's castle and a snack with his mom. | 1.3179 | 0.04319 | 173 | 127 | 37 | 9 |
633 | my daughter’s a bit of a princess | 1.3179 | 0.04639 | 151 | 111 | 32 | 8 |
634 | It's my weekend with the kids. | 1.3176 | 0.04207 | 170 | 123 | 40 | 7 |
635 | My highchair for a horse. | 1.3176 | 0.05077 | 148 | 113 | 23 | 12 |
636 | They finally cut the royal purse strings. It was this or the bouncy castle. | 1.3175 | 0.05243 | 126 | 94 | 24 | 8 |
637 | You rescue the swimmers; I’m guarding the castle. | 1.3174 | 0.04169 | 167 | 120 | 41 | 6 |
638 | And what was the bet? | 1.3169 | 0.04727 | 142 | 104 | 31 | 7 |
639 | Yes, it's definitely a chick magnet. | 1.3168 | 0.04172 | 161 | 115 | 41 | 5 |
640 | I'm going to Knight school. This is only my summer job. | 1.3168 | 0.04529 | 161 | 119 | 33 | 9 |
641 | If I don't defend the castle who will? | 1.3165 | 0.05006 | 139 | 104 | 26 | 9 |
642 | I’m here guarding the castle. What are you doing here? | 1.3161 | 0.04735 | 155 | 116 | 29 | 10 |
643 | You may protect the sea, but I protect the land. | 1.3161 | 0.04822 | 155 | 117 | 27 | 11 |
644 | Well, I had to diversify my portfolio. In the fall it's back to a birthday party clown. | 1.3161 | 0.04735 | 155 | 116 | 29 | 10 |
645 | The king said breach, I heard beach. | 1.3161 | 0.04375 | 174 | 129 | 35 | 10 |
646 | “So, three whistles and we bring in all the king’s horses and all the king’s men?” | 1.3161 | 0.04450 | 174 | 130 | 33 | 11 |
647 | This week I'm working the knight shift. | 1.3158 | 0.04320 | 152 | 109 | 38 | 5 |
648 | I told them I was a castle guard. I was expecting a bit more. | 1.3158 | 0.04707 | 152 | 113 | 30 | 9 |
649 | You'd be surprised at how many moat rescues I perform. | 1.3155 | 0.04148 | 168 | 121 | 41 | 6 |
650 | Why does that guy with the metal detector keep staring at me? | 1.3154 | 0.05009 | 130 | 96 | 27 | 7 |
651 | Does m'lady carry an oil can with her per chance? | 1.3152 | 0.04614 | 165 | 124 | 30 | 11 |
652 | But, I’m in charge of guarding the castle. | 1.3152 | 0.04195 | 165 | 119 | 40 | 6 |
653 | I like to be in the moment, a moment in the 13th century. | 1.3147 | 0.05197 | 143 | 110 | 21 | 12 |
654 | It belongs to Meghan and Harry | 1.3145 | 0.05653 | 124 | 96 | 17 | 11 |
655 | Defending my realm is easier than you’d think. | 1.3145 | 0.04474 | 159 | 117 | 34 | 8 |
656 | It tis I! Sir Sand a Lot! | 1.3144 | 0.04256 | 194 | 146 | 35 | 13 |
657 | Any tips for getting sand out of a suit? | 1.3141 | 0.04437 | 156 | 114 | 35 | 7 |
658 | Well, I was supposed to be off today... | 1.3141 | 0.04437 | 156 | 114 | 35 | 7 |
659 | You just focus on your own job | 1.3140 | 0.04630 | 172 | 131 | 28 | 13 |
660 | Over the years we've had to downsize | 1.3137 | 0.04948 | 153 | 117 | 24 | 12 |
661 | Actually, no. It was already here when I arrived. | 1.3129 | 0.04710 | 147 | 109 | 30 | 8 |
662 | I'll guard the castle; you rescue the sodden maidens. | 1.3125 | 0.04623 | 160 | 120 | 30 | 10 |
663 | What good is a sandcastle against a sea of troubles? | 1.3125 | 0.05165 | 144 | 111 | 21 | 12 |
664 | Ive been working re-moatly. | 1.3125 | 0.04774 | 144 | 107 | 29 | 8 |
665 | You go. I've got the castle. | 1.3121 | 0.04505 | 157 | 116 | 33 | 8 |
666 | Sure, you saved that swimmer, but I defended the entire castle. | 1.3121 | 0.04841 | 141 | 105 | 28 | 8 |
667 | I heard tell of a serf uprising. | 1.3120 | 0.05497 | 125 | 96 | 19 | 10 |
668 | When you posted anonymously on Craigslist that you were hiring security for your son's castle, I had a very different Kingdom in mind. | 1.3120 | 0.05378 | 125 | 95 | 21 | 9 |
669 | I guess I miss read the ad for Night Watchman. | 1.3118 | 0.04512 | 170 | 128 | 31 | 11 |
670 | My last summer job was at Medieval Times | 1.3117 | 0.04562 | 154 | 114 | 32 | 8 |
671 | They are winning, but the tide will turn | 1.3117 | 0.04372 | 154 | 112 | 36 | 6 |
672 | I’m not convinced this moat needs two lifeguards. | 1.3117 | 0.04745 | 154 | 116 | 28 | 10 |
673 | I dare you to knock it down. | 1.3116 | 0.04802 | 138 | 102 | 29 | 7 |
674 | So, you guard the ocean and I'll guard the castle. | 1.3115 | 0.04426 | 183 | 139 | 31 | 13 |
675 | You take the next one. The water rusts my armor. | 1.3108 | 0.04875 | 148 | 112 | 26 | 10 |
676 | I was told to cover the knight shift | 1.3103 | 0.04511 | 174 | 132 | 30 | 12 |
677 | Guard my castle with your life,I’m going on break. | 1.3101 | 0.04570 | 158 | 118 | 31 | 9 |
678 | The kingdom's biggest concern is rising tides. | 1.3101 | 0.04827 | 158 | 121 | 25 | 12 |
679 | It's all Donald Trump has left after paying all his taxes and penalties owed. | 1.3101 | 0.05138 | 129 | 97 | 24 | 8 |
680 | I volunteered to work the “knight” shift. | 1.3099 | 0.04915 | 142 | 107 | 26 | 9 |
681 | They called me in cuz you let the last one wash away. | 1.3099 | 0.04915 | 142 | 107 | 26 | 9 |
682 | Until September. It’s a summer knight thing. | 1.3098 | 0.04198 | 184 | 137 | 37 | 10 |
683 | My dermatologist recommend this | 1.3097 | 0.04718 | 155 | 117 | 28 | 10 |
684 | Can you keep an eye on things while I go on this quest? | 1.3095 | 0.04132 | 168 | 122 | 40 | 6 |
685 | My boss is only six. | 1.3095 | 0.05098 | 126 | 94 | 25 | 7 |
686 | You watch the sea. I'll protect the castle. | 1.3094 | 0.04244 | 181 | 135 | 36 | 10 |
687 | It’s the newest Trump property. They tell me it’s worth between $0 and $100 million | 1.3094 | 0.05191 | 139 | 107 | 21 | 11 |
688 | Knights of The Tide Table! | 1.3092 | 0.05300 | 152 | 121 | 15 | 16 |
689 | If that kid comes back to wreck this castle, he'll get the taste of cold steel. | 1.3091 | 0.04599 | 165 | 125 | 29 | 11 |
690 | I guess you didn’t hear about the high serf advisory. | 1.3089 | 0.05180 | 123 | 92 | 24 | 7 |
691 | High tide poses a threat. | 1.3087 | 0.04939 | 149 | 114 | 24 | 11 |
692 | Of course I can swim with this. With all the mass shootings these days you can't be careful enough. Besides, it's my right to bear armour. | 1.3087 | 0.05294 | 149 | 118 | 16 | 15 |
693 | All I need is a princess and my kingdom will be complete. | 1.3086 | 0.04657 | 162 | 123 | 28 | 11 |
694 | I can defend the castle, but I'm too rusty for lifesaving. | 1.3082 | 0.04457 | 159 | 118 | 33 | 8 |
695 | When the invaders come, you're going to need more than zinc oxide. | 1.3077 | 0.04603 | 156 | 117 | 30 | 9 |
696 | The rising sea level is going to cost us our jobs. | 1.3077 | 0.04441 | 169 | 127 | 32 | 10 |
697 | I stopped using SPF 15 sunscreen lotion when I discovered that a daily squirt of WD-40 does the trick | 1.3073 | 0.04415 | 179 | 136 | 31 | 12 |
698 | Can you watch my zone a minute, I need to go ‘slay the dragon’ | 1.3072 | 0.04754 | 153 | 116 | 27 | 10 |
699 | I'm supposed to hold back the tide with a spear? | 1.3071 | 0.04407 | 140 | 101 | 35 | 4 |
700 | Hey, let’s see who’s laughing once the crabs attack. | 1.3071 | 0.04851 | 140 | 105 | 27 | 8 |
701 | No,the dragon is real,the sea monster is just a myth. | 1.3066 | 0.05135 | 137 | 105 | 22 | 10 |
702 | Wait, they’re paying you?! | 1.3064 | 0.04211 | 173 | 128 | 37 | 8 |
703 | I'm usually on knight watch. | 1.3062 | 0.04775 | 160 | 123 | 25 | 12 |
704 | Do I tell you how to do your job? | 1.3061 | 0.04488 | 147 | 108 | 33 | 6 |
705 | So, when do we send in the Trojan crab? | 1.3059 | 0.04573 | 170 | 130 | 28 | 12 |
706 | I’ll take marauding mythical creatures and water-based sieges if you take anything that requires treading water | 1.3058 | 0.05358 | 121 | 92 | 21 | 8 |
707 | Lifeguard? No, I'm a prison guard. Nobody escapes from the castle. | 1.3057 | 0.04666 | 157 | 119 | 28 | 10 |
708 | I know we agreed to support our sons creative spirit, but don’t you think this is a bit much? | 1.3057 | 0.04838 | 157 | 121 | 24 | 12 |
709 | Sure it’s not practical, but they need incentives to get tourists back. | 1.3056 | 0.04755 | 144 | 108 | 28 | 8 |
710 | Would you possibly know where the king of the castle has gone? | 1.3056 | 0.04546 | 144 | 106 | 32 | 6 |
711 | Why do you put that white stuff on your nose? | 1.3054 | 0.04307 | 167 | 124 | 35 | 8 |
712 | I'm committed to the bit. | 1.3054 | 0.04307 | 167 | 124 | 35 | 8 |
713 | Anyone is the water is yours. | 1.3053 | 0.05071 | 131 | 99 | 24 | 8 |
714 | I thought I was applying for a position at Under Armor as a night watchman | 1.3053 | 0.04584 | 131 | 95 | 32 | 4 |
715 | Excessive? Have you seen the movie JAWS??? | 1.3053 | 0.04833 | 131 | 97 | 28 | 6 |
716 | Breach, you say? I could have sworn he said ‘once more unto the beach.’ | 1.3052 | 0.04816 | 154 | 118 | 25 | 11 |
717 | You take care of the water rescues and I'll defend the castle. | 1.3047 | 0.05150 | 128 | 97 | 23 | 8 |
718 | Yea, well, you look like you are sitting in a wheelchair. | 1.3046 | 0.04882 | 151 | 116 | 24 | 11 |
719 | It’s a long tale. | 1.3043 | 0.04890 | 138 | 104 | 26 | 8 |
720 | Re: mote control | 1.3043 | 0.04890 | 138 | 104 | 26 | 8 |
721 | On Fridays I’m allowed to wear sandals. | 1.3043 | 0.04230 | 161 | 118 | 37 | 6 |
722 | We are the first line of defense against Poseidon and his men | 1.3043 | 0.04890 | 138 | 104 | 26 | 8 |
723 | Sunscreen! I knew I was forgetting something. | 1.3041 | 0.04396 | 171 | 129 | 32 | 10 |
724 | The job description said “appropriate attire.” | 1.3041 | 0.04317 | 171 | 128 | 34 | 9 |
725 | I fear that a breach of the castle wall is imminent. Before it’s too late, I wanted to tell you that it’s been an honor serving with you. | 1.3041 | 0.04664 | 148 | 111 | 29 | 8 |
726 | Dibs on drowning damsels, OK? | 1.3037 | 0.04850 | 135 | 101 | 27 | 7 |
727 | The kids hired me to protect the castle. | 1.3034 | 0.04519 | 145 | 107 | 32 | 6 |
728 | Some kids asked me to protect their castle. | 1.3034 | 0.04125 | 178 | 132 | 38 | 8 |
729 | A gig’s a gig, am I right?” | 1.3032 | 0.04232 | 155 | 113 | 37 | 5 |
730 | What is it that you're protecting? | 1.3028 | 0.05095 | 142 | 110 | 21 | 11 |
731 | Ugh, I thought I asked for the nightwatch position | 1.3028 | 0.04895 | 142 | 108 | 25 | 9 |
732 | No, it's not just perspective. My chair really is bigger than yours. | 1.3026 | 0.04671 | 152 | 115 | 28 | 9 |
733 | What? We have to swim? | 1.3026 | 0.04763 | 152 | 116 | 26 | 10 |
734 | Just here to watch out for any rough serf. | 1.3025 | 0.05411 | 119 | 91 | 20 | 8 |
735 | Actually, today’s high tide coincides with the end of chivalry | 1.3023 | 0.05116 | 129 | 98 | 23 | 8 |
736 | I am prepared to defend our castle walls against the rising tide while you, milady, look prepared to join them! | 1.3022 | 0.04860 | 139 | 105 | 26 | 8 |
737 | You watch the ocean. I've got the sand castle. | 1.3020 | 0.04119 | 149 | 107 | 39 | 3 |
738 | The work is easy, but it's like an oven in here. | 1.3014 | 0.04699 | 146 | 110 | 28 | 8 |
739 | My Duchy, my rules! | 1.3013 | 0.04401 | 156 | 116 | 33 | 7 |
740 | This is a lot easier than my last gig. | 1.3013 | 0.04401 | 156 | 116 | 33 | 7 |
741 | I appreciate you're wearing a bronzer, but I still maintain I have the better defensive capability. | 1.3008 | 0.04889 | 133 | 100 | 26 | 7 |
742 | I don't have a lifeguard certification, but what I do have is a very particular set of skills. | 1.3007 | 0.04551 | 153 | 115 | 30 | 8 |
743 | I thought you only work knights. | 1.3000 | 0.04830 | 140 | 106 | 26 | 8 |
744 | Sharks? Sure, but what about Viking longboats? | 1.3000 | 0.04612 | 140 | 104 | 30 | 6 |
745 | Thanks, but I don't use sunscreen. | 1.3000 | 0.04323 | 170 | 128 | 33 | 9 |
746 | U.S.C...you? | 1.3000 | 0.04935 | 140 | 107 | 24 | 9 |
747 | Head's up -- the tiny crocs are no joke. | 1.3000 | 0.04512 | 150 | 112 | 31 | 7 |
748 | Yeah, I don't really worry about sunblock or jellyfish | 1.3000 | 0.04674 | 120 | 87 | 30 | 3 |
749 | Castle-defense gigs have shrunk a lot over the past millennium. | 1.3000 | 0.04963 | 130 | 98 | 25 | 7 |
750 | I didn't say, "You come here a lot?" I said, "I'm from Camelot." | 1.2994 | 0.04374 | 167 | 126 | 32 | 9 |
751 | No point saving people from drowning just to let them fall victim to pirates | 1.2994 | 0.04649 | 157 | 120 | 27 | 10 |
752 | I'm having trouble adjusting to the Knight shift. | 1.2994 | 0.04560 | 157 | 119 | 29 | 9 |
753 | This is my first time doing knight work. | 1.2993 | 0.04570 | 147 | 110 | 30 | 7 |
754 | Build it and they will come." | 1.2993 | 0.04671 | 147 | 111 | 28 | 8 |
755 | Thanks. The serf just finished it. | 1.2993 | 0.04570 | 147 | 110 | 30 | 7 |
756 | Everyone asks for a knight in shining armour, so there. | 1.2992 | 0.05161 | 127 | 97 | 22 | 8 |
757 | I'm here to defend the honor of the King Crab. | 1.2992 | 0.04784 | 127 | 94 | 28 | 5 |
758 | Beware the tides of March | 1.2988 | 0.04426 | 164 | 124 | 31 | 9 |
759 | The suit of armor has better protection than any SPF. | 1.2987 | 0.04431 | 154 | 115 | 32 | 7 |
760 | It's not easy working the knight shift | 1.2985 | 0.04858 | 134 | 101 | 26 | 7 |
761 | High tide? What do you mean? | 1.2985 | 0.05193 | 134 | 104 | 20 | 10 |
762 | It's hard to say what is the dumbest part of this job. | 1.2985 | 0.04972 | 134 | 102 | 24 | 8 |
763 | It looked so big when I was small. | 1.2982 | 0.04055 | 171 | 126 | 39 | 6 |
764 | I will do anything to protect my beachside property. | 1.2982 | 0.04302 | 171 | 129 | 33 | 9 |
765 | The metal detector guy worries me the most. | 1.2981 | 0.04814 | 161 | 126 | 22 | 13 |
766 | I'll handle castle insurrection. You take care of everything else. | 1.2979 | 0.04585 | 141 | 105 | 30 | 6 |
767 | I’m on the knight shift | 1.2977 | 0.04686 | 131 | 97 | 29 | 5 |
768 | I'm trying to trade it for a horse. No takers. | 1.2977 | 0.04809 | 131 | 98 | 27 | 6 |
769 | Actually the permit was easy. It's a tiny castle so it's seen as an accessory dweling. | 1.2975 | 0.04623 | 158 | 121 | 27 | 10 |
770 | What are you protecting? | 1.2975 | 0.04164 | 158 | 116 | 37 | 5 |
771 | I'm a temp. The job ends when the tide comes in. | 1.2973 | 0.05519 | 111 | 85 | 19 | 7 |
772 | Need a pee break. Would you hold my spear? | 1.2971 | 0.04413 | 138 | 101 | 33 | 4 |
773 | How long is our bathroom break? | 1.2971 | 0.04869 | 138 | 105 | 25 | 8 |
774 | It’s SPF 90 and I don’t need to reapply after I go in the water either. | 1.2970 | 0.04318 | 165 | 124 | 33 | 8 |
775 | No, actually, it's the titanium codpiece that's hot and uncomfortable. | 1.2970 | 0.04567 | 165 | 127 | 27 | 11 |
776 | We fully intend to hold out indefinitely. | 1.2969 | 0.05005 | 128 | 97 | 24 | 7 |
777 | Yeah it’s hot, but never any dragons and I’m done for the day once high tide hits. | 1.2969 | 0.05005 | 128 | 97 | 24 | 7 |
778 | Oh I’ll drown for sure. | 1.2969 | 0.05245 | 128 | 99 | 20 | 9 |
779 | Sometimes a moat is not enough. | 1.2968 | 0.04406 | 155 | 116 | 32 | 7 |
780 | To be clear, I'm only here for the sandcastle. | 1.2968 | 0.04501 | 155 | 117 | 30 | 8 |
781 | Dost thou have the coconut scented hinge oil? | 1.2966 | 0.04861 | 118 | 87 | 27 | 4 |
782 | I am telling you, LinkedIn job descriptions are getting harder and harder to interpret. | 1.2966 | 0.05424 | 118 | 91 | 19 | 8 |
783 | The poorer swimmers have learned not to go in the water on lifeguard medieval costume days. | 1.2963 | 0.04280 | 162 | 121 | 34 | 7 |
784 | Call me Sir Sinksalot one more time and see what happens! | 1.2963 | 0.04541 | 162 | 124 | 28 | 10 |
785 | SPF 1240. Yours? | 1.2961 | 0.04652 | 152 | 116 | 27 | 9 |
786 | Have you seen a six inch horse pulling a three inch chariot? | 1.2958 | 0.04557 | 142 | 106 | 30 | 6 |
787 | SPF 1000 has its downsides. | 1.2958 | 0.04557 | 142 | 106 | 30 | 6 |
788 | 'Scuse me but you happen to know when high tide is? | 1.2958 | 0.04771 | 142 | 108 | 26 | 8 |
789 | Ha ha. I get it. I’m gonna need a bigger moat… | 1.2957 | 0.05380 | 115 | 88 | 20 | 7 |
790 | That’s Praetorian lifeguard to you. | 1.2956 | 0.04684 | 159 | 123 | 25 | 11 |
791 | Yeah, yeah. Just let me do my job, lady. | 1.2956 | 0.04421 | 159 | 120 | 31 | 8 |
792 | Your whistle will be no match for the invading hordes! | 1.2955 | 0.05014 | 132 | 101 | 23 | 8 |
793 | We're expecting the combined Viking/Saxon force to try to overrun the fort somewheres around teatime. | 1.2955 | 0.05014 | 132 | 101 | 23 | 8 |
794 | I'm here to save the seahorses. | 1.2955 | 0.05128 | 132 | 102 | 21 | 9 |
795 | There's no wrong way to fight the rising tide. | 1.2951 | 0.05032 | 122 | 92 | 24 | 6 |
796 | 'I'd worry more about the tide, Arthur.' | 1.2951 | 0.05032 | 122 | 92 | 24 | 6 |
797 | It's the new SPF 5000. I'm protected against harmful UV rays, hyperpigmentation, and dragons. | 1.2950 | 0.05049 | 139 | 108 | 21 | 10 |
798 | The ad said guard needed for beachfront castle with moat. | 1.2950 | 0.05049 | 139 | 108 | 21 | 10 |
799 | You take care of swimmers, and I’ll make sure nobody attacks the castle. | 1.2950 | 0.04729 | 139 | 105 | 27 | 7 |
800 | I am guarding the Trump Castle valued in excess of 20 million dollars!!!! | 1.2950 | 0.04945 | 139 | 107 | 23 | 9 |
801 | I put on a little show at high tide. Dance around and sing. Costume's hot but the tips are good, the ones that don't wash away. | 1.2950 | 0.04504 | 139 | 103 | 31 | 5 |
802 | It’s the only job I can find guarding a castle | 1.2950 | 0.04504 | 139 | 103 | 31 | 5 |
803 | Got this side gig working security. Fifty bucks a castle. | 1.2950 | 0.04504 | 139 | 103 | 31 | 5 |
804 | By any chance have you seen a loose dragon? | 1.2946 | 0.04971 | 129 | 98 | 24 | 7 |
805 | You’re making fun of me again, aren’t you? | 1.2946 | 0.05437 | 129 | 102 | 16 | 11 |
806 | Stay alert! Thy children aproacheth. | 1.2946 | 0.05092 | 129 | 99 | 22 | 8 |
807 | ...because sun block kills coral! | 1.2941 | 0.05642 | 119 | 94 | 15 | 10 |
808 | If you ask me, sunglasses are not the best disguise. | 1.2941 | 0.04676 | 119 | 87 | 29 | 3 |
809 | S.P.F. one million, baby! | 1.2941 | 0.04626 | 153 | 117 | 27 | 9 |
810 | It does get hot, but it's SPF one million | 1.2941 | 0.04225 | 170 | 128 | 34 | 8 |
811 | In hindsight,I should have asked more questions when that kid said there was a castle to guard. | 1.2941 | 0.04908 | 136 | 104 | 24 | 8 |
812 | I can't decide what's worse--the uniform or the lack of job security. | 1.2937 | 0.04742 | 143 | 109 | 26 | 8 |
813 | We're thinking about joining NATO. | 1.2937 | 0.04790 | 126 | 94 | 27 | 5 |
814 | I'm here to make sure no one storms the castle. | 1.2932 | 0.04981 | 133 | 102 | 23 | 8 |
815 | The job description was very confusing | 1.2932 | 0.04747 | 133 | 100 | 27 | 6 |
816 | The little brat's parents paid me a hundred bucks to wear the armour. | 1.2932 | 0.04747 | 133 | 100 | 27 | 6 |
817 | Harry and Megan can be nostalgic sometimes. | 1.2931 | 0.05051 | 116 | 87 | 24 | 5 |
818 | I said I would hold the Fort and that’s exactly what I intend to do Muriel. | 1.2931 | 0.05340 | 116 | 89 | 20 | 7 |
819 | If I rust, oil me. | 1.2924 | 0.04285 | 171 | 130 | 32 | 9 |
820 | I'm a little rusty." | 1.2922 | 0.04506 | 154 | 117 | 29 | 8 |
821 | Sometimes I just need to feel like a hero. | 1.2920 | 0.05433 | 113 | 87 | 19 | 7 |
822 | Sorry, I'm tilting at windmills after work. | 1.2920 | 0.05433 | 113 | 87 | 19 | 7 |
823 | Changing of the guard | 1.2920 | 0.04986 | 137 | 106 | 22 | 9 |
824 | I can't swim so they gave me this | 1.2917 | 0.04915 | 144 | 112 | 22 | 10 |
825 | I should've splurged for the stainless. | 1.2917 | 0.04416 | 168 | 129 | 29 | 10 |
826 | I'm here to prevent the kingdom's erosion of power. | 1.2913 | 0.04758 | 127 | 95 | 27 | 5 |
827 | I'm watching out for a Trojan seahorse. | 1.2911 | 0.04335 | 158 | 119 | 32 | 7 |
828 | Thou hast seen nothing yet. | 1.2910 | 0.04345 | 134 | 98 | 33 | 3 |
829 | I may get heat stroke, but at least I won’t get sunburnt. | 1.2910 | 0.04472 | 134 | 99 | 31 | 4 |
830 | These days, we’ve been reduced to Camelittle. | 1.2910 | 0.05383 | 134 | 107 | 15 | 12 |
831 | I thought size didn’t matter. | 1.2908 | 0.04884 | 141 | 109 | 23 | 9 |
832 | It looked so much bigger when I was a kid | 1.2905 | 0.04523 | 148 | 112 | 29 | 7 |
833 | My skin IS protected. | 1.2903 | 0.04962 | 124 | 94 | 24 | 6 |
834 | My job is to protect the serf’s turf from the surf. | 1.2903 | 0.05343 | 124 | 97 | 18 | 9 |
835 | I don’t think you’re taking this seriously enough, Susan! | 1.2903 | 0.04962 | 124 | 94 | 24 | 6 |
836 | I seek the Holy Pail | 1.2901 | 0.04523 | 162 | 125 | 27 | 10 |
837 | There was a dragon sighting here in 1674, so we need to be ready. | 1.2901 | 0.04784 | 131 | 99 | 26 | 6 |
838 | Ever feel like you’re in the wrong job? | 1.2901 | 0.04660 | 131 | 98 | 28 | 5 |
839 | Stay in your lane, Karen. I shall protect the castle. | 1.2901 | 0.05024 | 131 | 101 | 22 | 8 |
840 | I"m starting to lose my enthusiasm for the gig economy. | 1.2901 | 0.04905 | 131 | 100 | 24 | 7 |
841 | Marry me and the castle is yours. | 1.2899 | 0.04846 | 138 | 106 | 24 | 8 |
842 | Aren't you glad this is an armor optional beach? | 1.2895 | 0.04781 | 114 | 84 | 27 | 3 |
843 | They did not issue me a whistle. | 1.2895 | 0.04781 | 114 | 84 | 27 | 3 |
844 | I’m transitioning back to the era I was born for. | 1.2895 | 0.04726 | 152 | 118 | 24 | 10 |
845 | I've always enjoyed knight-work. | 1.2893 | 0.05306 | 121 | 94 | 19 | 8 |
846 | I would recommend just a basic SPF50 cream bro. | 1.2893 | 0.05174 | 121 | 93 | 21 | 7 |
847 | Can you pass the oil? | 1.2889 | 0.04803 | 135 | 103 | 25 | 7 |
848 | "Normally I keep an eye on the castle at home via web-cam, but I lost my remoat. | 1.2887 | 0.04853 | 142 | 110 | 23 | 9 |
849 | I wanted to be king of the castle for once. | 1.2887 | 0.04955 | 142 | 111 | 21 | 10 |
850 | You're late. My shift was supposed to be over six hundred years ago. | 1.2887 | 0.04643 | 142 | 108 | 27 | 7 |
851 | The mutton and ale was quite good but I was ordered to wait at least twenty minutes before swimming. | 1.2887 | 0.04643 | 142 | 108 | 27 | 7 |
852 | What is this “sunscreen,” of which you speak? | 1.2885 | 0.04363 | 156 | 118 | 31 | 7 |
853 | Obviously, one of us is not dressed correctly for the duty! | 1.2883 | 0.05779 | 111 | 88 | 14 | 9 |
854 | Barbarians? No, toddlers. | 1.2881 | 0.05121 | 118 | 90 | 22 | 6 |
855 | At night I'm an Uber driver. | 1.2881 | 0.05529 | 118 | 93 | 16 | 9 |
856 | Yes. A tad warm. But they told me it's more effective than sun screen. | 1.2879 | 0.04373 | 132 | 97 | 32 | 3 |
857 | How’d you like to have the knight of your life? | 1.2879 | 0.04873 | 132 | 101 | 24 | 7 |
858 | I am Sir Lancelot, Jr., Protector of Sandelot. | 1.2878 | 0.04816 | 139 | 107 | 24 | 8 |
859 | The crabs are particularly aggressive during mating season. | 1.2877 | 0.04555 | 146 | 111 | 28 | 7 |
860 | SPF 10,000 is my minimum. | 1.2877 | 0.04657 | 146 | 112 | 26 | 8 |
861 | So SPF isn't code for 'Spartan-protected fortress?' | 1.2877 | 0.04657 | 146 | 112 | 26 | 8 |
862 | Back in the day invasions were commonplace around here | 1.2876 | 0.04512 | 153 | 117 | 28 | 8 |
863 | You’ll understand when you have kids. | 1.2870 | 0.05491 | 115 | 90 | 17 | 8 |
864 | I've become your knight in shining armor. I've built you a castle. Why are you still complaining? | 1.2870 | 0.05491 | 115 | 90 | 17 | 8 |
865 | I call dibs on damsels in distress. | 1.2869 | 0.05004 | 122 | 93 | 23 | 6 |
866 | I think it’s SPF CXIV | 1.2869 | 0.05004 | 122 | 93 | 23 | 6 |
867 | I may have to take a swim, I have sand in my suit | 1.2869 | 0.04580 | 122 | 90 | 29 | 3 |
868 | You save the people from drowning; I'll save them from their fears. | 1.2869 | 0.04866 | 122 | 92 | 25 | 5 |
869 | Last time they snuck in disguised as a giant sea horse | 1.2868 | 0.04946 | 129 | 99 | 23 | 7 |
870 | You take the day watch and I'll take the night watch. | 1.2868 | 0.04417 | 136 | 101 | 31 | 4 |
871 | What time do you get off? | 1.2868 | 0.04538 | 136 | 102 | 29 | 5 |
872 | Another unpaid internship. | 1.2868 | 0.04995 | 136 | 106 | 21 | 9 |
873 | Looking out for dragon flies. | 1.2867 | 0.04266 | 150 | 112 | 33 | 5 |
874 | You save the swimmers, leave the siege to me. | 1.2867 | 0.04370 | 150 | 113 | 31 | 6 |
875 | What do YOU use for Sunblock? | 1.2866 | 0.04612 | 157 | 122 | 25 | 10 |
876 | The employment agency left out a few details. | 1.2857 | 0.05083 | 119 | 91 | 22 | 6 |
877 | How do you like Medieval Tides? | 1.2857 | 0.04335 | 140 | 104 | 32 | 4 |
878 | I got burned at my last job. | 1.2857 | 0.05071 | 133 | 104 | 20 | 9 |
879 | I’m guarding against Trojan seahorses. | 1.2857 | 0.04729 | 147 | 114 | 24 | 9 |
880 | If they attack by sea, they're in for a big surprise. | 1.2857 | 0.05071 | 133 | 104 | 20 | 9 |
881 | If you see a wooden seahorse coming ashore; Please let me know. | 1.2857 | 0.05356 | 119 | 93 | 18 | 8 |
882 | I was downsized. | 1.2857 | 0.04600 | 133 | 100 | 28 | 5 |
883 | I'll guard the castle, you guard my life - deal? | 1.2857 | 0.04566 | 140 | 106 | 28 | 6 |
884 | It offers full protection against melanoma and body shamers. | 1.2857 | 0.05141 | 112 | 85 | 22 | 5 |
885 | Are you on TikTok? | 1.2857 | 0.04841 | 133 | 102 | 24 | 7 |
886 | Just leave the damsels for me. | 1.2857 | 0.04212 | 133 | 97 | 34 | 2 |
887 | Where is this Tide of which you speak? I will run him through! | 1.2857 | 0.05222 | 119 | 92 | 20 | 7 |
888 | It’s all about the first line of defense. | 1.2857 | 0.04487 | 154 | 118 | 28 | 8 |
889 | You do you. | 1.2848 | 0.04734 | 151 | 118 | 23 | 10 |
890 | I'll protect the land; you protect the sea | 1.2847 | 0.04692 | 144 | 111 | 25 | 8 |
891 | You’ll have to rescue my sand castle salt water will rust my armour | 1.2847 | 0.04480 | 144 | 109 | 29 | 6 |
892 | I’m sworn to protect the kingdom. | 1.2845 | 0.04868 | 116 | 87 | 25 | 4 |
893 | I'll defend my castle to the death. You can deal with saving drowning people. | 1.2840 | 0.04242 | 162 | 123 | 32 | 7 |
894 | You can never be too prepared. | 1.2833 | 0.05046 | 120 | 92 | 22 | 6 |
895 | If I sink, you swim. | 1.2833 | 0.04906 | 120 | 91 | 24 | 5 |
896 | I'm off tomorrow so you will have to hold the fort down. | 1.2832 | 0.04944 | 113 | 85 | 24 | 4 |
897 | Forget the fort, one more big wave and I am going to need an oil can. | 1.2832 | 0.05402 | 113 | 88 | 18 | 7 |
898 | Stand ready, the tide may turn yet. | 1.2829 | 0.04320 | 152 | 115 | 31 | 6 |
899 | My shift ends when the tide comes in. | 1.2826 | 0.04239 | 138 | 102 | 33 | 3 |
900 | Dibs on Damsels. | 1.2826 | 0.04598 | 138 | 105 | 27 | 6 |
901 | My kingdom for a lemonade. | 1.2823 | 0.04517 | 124 | 92 | 29 | 3 |
902 | You take over when the moat fills in! | 1.2821 | 0.04832 | 117 | 88 | 25 | 4 |
903 | Baron Trump hired me to guard his castle. | 1.2821 | 0.05270 | 117 | 91 | 19 | 7 |
904 | In cosplay, I’m Sir Sandalot. But cmy friends call me Rusty. | 1.2821 | 0.05128 | 117 | 90 | 21 | 6 |
905 | Didn't you used to guard Barbie's Dream House? | 1.2819 | 0.04673 | 149 | 116 | 24 | 9 |
906 | It’s not helicopter parenting. My son is just meticulous when it comes to detail. | 1.2818 | 0.05187 | 110 | 84 | 21 | 5 |
907 | You know it’s not a real castle, right? | 1.2817 | 0.04620 | 142 | 109 | 26 | 7 |
908 | It was this or my birthday suit. | 1.2817 | 0.04727 | 142 | 110 | 24 | 8 |
909 | You can be lifeguard during the day and I'll be the knight guard. | 1.2815 | 0.04778 | 135 | 104 | 24 | 7 |
910 | Knight takes castle. | 1.2815 | 0.04418 | 135 | 101 | 30 | 4 |
911 | I've got an extra visor. | 1.2815 | 0.04661 | 135 | 103 | 26 | 6 |
912 | You should do it. I'm too rusty. | 1.2812 | 0.04565 | 128 | 96 | 28 | 4 |
913 | You watch the water. I’ll watch the kingdom. | 1.2812 | 0.04698 | 128 | 97 | 26 | 5 |
914 | Yeah, this version of Spamalot is pretty off-Broadway. | 1.2812 | 0.04287 | 128 | 94 | 32 | 2 |
915 | It could be worse, you know... I could be guarding a real castle in my Speedo right now... | 1.2808 | 0.04635 | 146 | 113 | 25 | 8 |
916 | Doth the tiny damsel per chance swim? | 1.2807 | 0.05361 | 114 | 89 | 18 | 7 |
917 | What are you guarding? | 1.2806 | 0.04570 | 139 | 106 | 27 | 6 |
918 | No, I’ve been rusted in place since my last rescue attempt. | 1.2806 | 0.05005 | 139 | 110 | 19 | 10 |
919 | You'll have to rescue the swimmers---I'm here to defend the castle. | 1.2804 | 0.04932 | 107 | 80 | 24 | 3 |
920 | So you think you are keeping them safer? | 1.2803 | 0.04965 | 132 | 103 | 21 | 8 |
921 | I can handle most problems, but that high tide thing is a real bitch. | 1.2803 | 0.04602 | 132 | 100 | 27 | 5 |
922 | My castle needs a bigger moat. | 1.2803 | 0.04344 | 132 | 98 | 31 | 3 |
923 | You should see my real castle. | 1.2803 | 0.04602 | 132 | 100 | 27 | 5 |
924 | Baywatchingham. | 1.2800 | 0.04899 | 125 | 96 | 23 | 6 |
925 | I don't need any sun screen, thanks, but if you have some WD40... | 1.2800 | 0.04741 | 150 | 118 | 22 | 10 |
926 | SURE,,, you protect all the swimmers,,, but I'm watching over an entire fortress,,, | 1.2800 | 0.05156 | 125 | 98 | 19 | 8 |
927 | What's my name? I 'm Nathan Franks, King Of All Coney Island Sand Castles and I dub thee Princess Inquisitive Of Queens. | 1.2800 | 0.04899 | 125 | 96 | 23 | 6 |
928 | Let me know if you see anyone who looks distressed. | 1.2800 | 0.04741 | 150 | 118 | 22 | 10 |
929 | I’m hoping they attack by land. | 1.2797 | 0.04372 | 143 | 108 | 30 | 5 |
930 | And after I made the first one, everybody started making them. | 1.2797 | 0.04797 | 118 | 89 | 25 | 4 |
931 | Is your chair creaking? | 1.2797 | 0.04946 | 118 | 90 | 23 | 5 |
932 | I always wanted a place near the water! | 1.2794 | 0.04972 | 136 | 107 | 20 | 9 |
933 | You call that guarding? | 1.2794 | 0.04512 | 136 | 103 | 28 | 5 |
934 | No bully is going kick sand in MY face. | 1.2792 | 0.04171 | 154 | 116 | 33 | 5 |
935 | I know you told everyone you're on the "knight shift" Debra, you are hilarious." | 1.2791 | 0.04535 | 129 | 97 | 28 | 4 |
936 | My realtor says it will sell for well over $1 million. | 1.2791 | 0.04535 | 129 | 97 | 28 | 4 |
937 | I’ll cover the near shore incidents. Also, serpents. | 1.2788 | 0.05195 | 104 | 79 | 21 | 4 |
938 | You take jellyfish, sharks, and drownings. I've got dragons, soil erosion, and marauding barbarians covered | 1.2787 | 0.04974 | 122 | 94 | 22 | 6 |
939 | You keep an eye on on the swimmers. I'll keep an eye out for someone storming the castle. | 1.2787 | 0.04974 | 122 | 94 | 22 | 6 |
940 | Well, you told me to stop building castles in the air. | 1.2787 | 0.05239 | 122 | 96 | 18 | 8 |
941 | I don't go in the water. | 1.2786 | 0.04188 | 140 | 104 | 33 | 3 |
942 | Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! | 1.2783 | 0.05461 | 115 | 91 | 16 | 8 |
943 | the brochure said a day and a knight at the beach | 1.2783 | 0.05024 | 115 | 88 | 22 | 5 |
944 | With gas prices so high, this is the closest we’re getting to Camelot right now. | 1.2783 | 0.05319 | 115 | 90 | 18 | 7 |
945 | I only use it for epic rescues.” | 1.2783 | 0.04711 | 115 | 86 | 26 | 3 |
946 | It's your coast. I'm just here for knight school. | 1.2782 | 0.04932 | 133 | 104 | 21 | 8 |
947 | I'll defend us on land if you'll cover the seas. | 1.2778 | 0.04597 | 126 | 95 | 27 | 4 |
948 | Chivalry is not dead! | 1.2778 | 0.04733 | 126 | 96 | 25 | 5 |
949 | Epstein didn’t kill himself. | 1.2778 | 0.05362 | 126 | 101 | 15 | 10 |
950 | Ran out of sun block. | 1.2778 | 0.04456 | 126 | 94 | 29 | 3 |
951 | I’ve got the moat, you watch the rest. | 1.2778 | 0.04669 | 144 | 112 | 24 | 8 |
952 | Ok, my turn: I fought valiantly in the crusades, I served my liege Lord in valor and faith, aaand… I put myself through college delivering pizzas. | 1.2774 | 0.04717 | 137 | 106 | 24 | 7 |
953 | Your move. | 1.2774 | 0.04484 | 137 | 104 | 28 | 5 |
954 | Sinking swimmers might be your thing, but rising tide is mine. | 1.2774 | 0.04717 | 137 | 106 | 24 | 7 |
955 | I’ve always told my liege that a good moat is the best defense. | 1.2774 | 0.04940 | 137 | 108 | 20 | 9 |
956 | At least I don't have to worry about sunburn. | 1.2770 | 0.04479 | 148 | 114 | 27 | 7 |
957 | My SPF number? I find 3 in 1 works best for me. | 1.2769 | 0.05006 | 130 | 102 | 20 | 8 |
958 | The castle needs guarding. You don’t stop being a castle guard because you’re on vacation. | 1.2769 | 0.04886 | 130 | 101 | 22 | 7 |
959 | Did you get demoted too? | 1.2769 | 0.04635 | 130 | 99 | 26 | 5 |
960 | The key is to stop the tide from encroaching | 1.2768 | 0.04947 | 112 | 85 | 23 | 4 |
961 | You are the day guard; I’m the knight guard | 1.2764 | 0.04939 | 123 | 95 | 22 | 6 |
962 | I think we've got the waterfront covered. | 1.2764 | 0.05072 | 123 | 96 | 20 | 7 |
963 | I told him it kinda defeats the purpose of the moat but the king insisted. | 1.2764 | 0.04939 | 123 | 95 | 22 | 6 |
964 | King Arthur does have quite the sense of humor. | 1.2763 | 0.04298 | 152 | 116 | 30 | 6 |
965 | Long story, but in the end I was de-moated | 1.2762 | 0.05496 | 105 | 82 | 17 | 6 |
966 | Ever feel like you're bigger than your job? | 1.2761 | 0.04784 | 134 | 104 | 23 | 7 |
967 | It’s like watching history on fast forward. | 1.2761 | 0.04784 | 134 | 104 | 23 | 7 |
968 | I'm saving on sunscreen, Gwen... | 1.2761 | 0.05013 | 134 | 106 | 19 | 9 |
969 | It's a money pit. | 1.2759 | 0.05279 | 116 | 91 | 18 | 7 |
970 | I like to pretend the crabs are viking raiders... | 1.2759 | 0.04834 | 116 | 88 | 24 | 4 |
971 | After this caption contest is over, how ‘bout you and I go out for a few meads? | 1.2756 | 0.04688 | 156 | 124 | 21 | 11 |
972 | Dragons, sea monsters or unruly five year olds, I'm ready for it all. | 1.2756 | 0.04959 | 127 | 99 | 21 | 7 |
973 | You watch the surf, and I’ll watch the serfs. | 1.2756 | 0.04566 | 127 | 96 | 27 | 4 |
974 | I'm freelancing this summer | 1.2756 | 0.04427 | 127 | 95 | 29 | 3 |
975 | Do you have any suntan oil? I'm beginning to rust. | 1.2755 | 0.05385 | 98 | 75 | 19 | 4 |
976 | They told me to dress for the occasion, but they were not clear about what it was. . . | 1.2752 | 0.05354 | 109 | 85 | 18 | 6 |
977 | I’m not a lifeguard, I’m just guarding the sand castle | 1.2752 | 0.04748 | 149 | 118 | 21 | 10 |
978 | Caesar sent me to look out for the tide’s of March. | 1.2750 | 0.05153 | 120 | 94 | 19 | 7 |
979 | Watch out for THE serf?....... I've got hundreds. | 1.2748 | 0.05089 | 131 | 104 | 18 | 9 |
980 | With this lifeguard shortage, it was just easier for them to hire me to guard the water from swimmers. | 1.2748 | 0.05089 | 131 | 104 | 18 | 9 |
981 | First day on the job?" | 1.2745 | 0.05601 | 102 | 80 | 16 | 6 |
982 | In the battle to defend the castle, I don't think I will be able to turn the tide | 1.2743 | 0.05067 | 113 | 87 | 21 | 5 |
983 | You better take the first rescue. I'll hold down then fort. | 1.2743 | 0.05067 | 113 | 87 | 21 | 5 |
984 | The job listing didn’t specify the type of castle I’d be guarding. | 1.2743 | 0.05067 | 113 | 87 | 21 | 5 |
985 | It seems the enemy is at our gates. | 1.2742 | 0.04768 | 124 | 95 | 24 | 5 |
986 | They're downsizing at Camelot | 1.2742 | 0.04485 | 124 | 93 | 28 | 3 |
987 | It's sink or swim, really | 1.2742 | 0.04768 | 124 | 95 | 24 | 5 |
988 | So have you actually seen this serf we are guarding? | 1.2741 | 0.04635 | 135 | 104 | 25 | 6 |
989 | I'm just protecting the Castle. | 1.2741 | 0.04262 | 135 | 101 | 31 | 3 |
990 | Well thank you. How? Gorilla Glue. | 1.2740 | 0.04403 | 146 | 112 | 28 | 6 |
991 | So, what's on your bucket list? | 1.2740 | 0.04403 | 146 | 112 | 28 | 6 |
992 | Mine's a one piece, no spandex, but a lot of sunscreen protection. | 1.2740 | 0.04613 | 146 | 114 | 24 | 8 |
993 | I'm battling the serf. | 1.2736 | 0.05451 | 106 | 83 | 17 | 6 |
994 | Yeah, my liege got me this summer internship. | 1.2734 | 0.04535 | 128 | 97 | 27 | 4 |
995 | Funny you should ask. | 1.2734 | 0.04535 | 128 | 97 | 27 | 4 |
996 | A canopener, a canopener. my kingdom for a canopener. | 1.2734 | 0.04668 | 128 | 98 | 25 | 5 |
997 | I am but a summer intern. | 1.2734 | 0.04668 | 128 | 98 | 25 | 5 |
998 | I trained with a different red cross. | 1.2734 | 0.04658 | 139 | 108 | 24 | 7 |
999 | I fear I’ve misunderstood something. | 1.2734 | 0.04544 | 139 | 107 | 26 | 6 |
1000 | Are you even taking this seriously? | 1.2727 | 0.04839 | 121 | 93 | 23 | 5 |
1001 | We’re going to need a bigger moat! | 1.2727 | 0.05311 | 110 | 86 | 18 | 6 |
1002 | It''s only temporary. | 1.2727 | 0.04987 | 110 | 84 | 22 | 4 |
1003 | This time I’m not letting any wooden Seahorse in my castle! | 1.2727 | 0.05249 | 121 | 96 | 17 | 8 |
1004 | I’ll joust you for it. | 1.2727 | 0.04178 | 132 | 98 | 32 | 2 |
1005 | All the agency said was the job involves castles and a coastline. *You* try guarding the south approach from Visigoths in a Speedo. | 1.2727 | 0.04821 | 132 | 103 | 22 | 7 |
1006 | So I guess I misunderstood when I heard “night watch”… | 1.2727 | 0.04821 | 132 | 103 | 22 | 7 |
1007 | Yes, you could say I take my job seriously. | 1.2721 | 0.04105 | 136 | 101 | 33 | 2 |
1008 | SPF 3000. It's highly recommended. | 1.2720 | 0.04454 | 125 | 94 | 28 | 3 |
1009 | Ron Quixote…and you are? | 1.2720 | 0.04869 | 125 | 97 | 22 | 6 |
1010 | What is this SPF of which thou speaketh? | 1.2719 | 0.04871 | 114 | 87 | 23 | 4 |
1011 | Is this the Rubicon? | 1.2718 | 0.05552 | 103 | 81 | 16 | 6 |
1012 | Ah! I see your point, the female uniform it’s quite unprotected. | 1.2715 | 0.04299 | 151 | 116 | 29 | 6 |
1013 | Arthur traded me to a four-year-old king. | 1.2713 | 0.04766 | 129 | 100 | 23 | 6 |
1014 | We're the only kingdom that gets sieged twice a day. | 1.2713 | 0.04891 | 129 | 101 | 21 | 7 |
1015 | How are you going to save anything wearing that? | 1.2713 | 0.05014 | 129 | 102 | 19 | 8 |
1016 | Ok, I overdid it with the game of thrones thing | 1.2713 | 0.04891 | 129 | 101 | 21 | 7 |
1017 | An ocean front castle with stainless suit seemed like a great deal. | 1.2713 | 0.04505 | 129 | 98 | 27 | 4 |
1018 | It’s just a starter home. | 1.2712 | 0.04449 | 118 | 88 | 28 | 2 |
1019 | Dibs on the moat. | 1.2712 | 0.04913 | 118 | 91 | 22 | 5 |
1020 | Just don't ask me if I "lance a lot," and we'll get along fine. | 1.2710 | 0.05405 | 107 | 84 | 17 | 6 |
1021 | I bet you wonder where my horse is. | 1.2708 | 0.05017 | 96 | 72 | 22 | 2 |
1022 | Seriously? There’s an entire Jimi Hendrix song about it! | 1.2708 | 0.05437 | 96 | 74 | 18 | 4 |
1023 | My suit is comfy, just a bit tricky draining the dragon. | 1.2707 | 0.04906 | 133 | 105 | 20 | 8 |
1024 | It’s a little warm but the SPF is 500. | 1.2707 | 0.04544 | 133 | 102 | 26 | 5 |
1025 | There is a time in the tides of men and kingdoms! | 1.2705 | 0.04943 | 122 | 95 | 21 | 6 |
1026 | Oil can...oil can | 1.2705 | 0.05079 | 122 | 96 | 19 | 7 |
1027 | Any suggestions on how to protect it from the waves? | 1.2703 | 0.04456 | 148 | 115 | 26 | 7 |
1028 | Everybody kept saying ‘Don’t quit your day job.’ | 1.2703 | 0.04456 | 148 | 115 | 26 | 7 |
1029 | I'll guard the castle, you guard the beach. | 1.2703 | 0.04948 | 111 | 85 | 22 | 4 |
1030 | Anyone starts to drown, I spear them. Quicker that way. | 1.2701 | 0.04691 | 137 | 107 | 23 | 7 |
1031 | This is required now because half the swimmers are armed with AR15s. | 1.2698 | 0.05214 | 126 | 101 | 16 | 9 |
1032 | The castle ain't much, but check out the moat. | 1.2698 | 0.04424 | 126 | 95 | 28 | 3 |
1033 | No,I don’t swim. I’m just here to guard the castle. | 1.2698 | 0.05335 | 126 | 102 | 14 | 10 |
1034 | Anything outside the moat is your territory, OK? | 1.2698 | 0.04835 | 126 | 98 | 22 | 6 |
1035 | Could you watch my moat while I run to the bathroom? | 1.2696 | 0.04835 | 115 | 88 | 23 | 4 |
1036 | My therapist says I tend to over compensate. | 1.2696 | 0.04835 | 115 | 88 | 23 | 4 |
1037 | Do you need me to draw a line in the sand? | 1.2696 | 0.05287 | 115 | 91 | 17 | 7 |
1038 | Six serfs a-surfing / Five telephone booths! Four calling birds / Three little beaches Two golden guards And a party on a far sand bar | 1.2695 | 0.04708 | 141 | 111 | 22 | 8 |
1039 | I'm here to protect it from the surfs | 1.2695 | 0.04919 | 141 | 113 | 18 | 10 |
1040 | Until His Majesty returns from His nap. | 1.2695 | 0.04815 | 141 | 112 | 20 | 9 |
1041 | Dost thou hear thunder? | 1.2695 | 0.04919 | 141 | 113 | 18 | 10 |
1042 | My kids birthday requests are getting weirder and weirder | 1.2695 | 0.04599 | 141 | 110 | 24 | 7 |
1043 | I've been de-moated. | 1.2692 | 0.05333 | 104 | 81 | 18 | 5 |
1044 | They assigned me to castle duty on April 1st. Why do you ask? | 1.2692 | 0.05155 | 104 | 80 | 20 | 4 |
1045 | I'm flattered, but I'm actually gay. | 1.2689 | 0.05021 | 119 | 93 | 20 | 6 |
1046 | ''And I asked the king, how exactly does one vanquish high tide?' | 1.2689 | 0.04728 | 119 | 91 | 24 | 4 |
1047 | No worry! All parts sprayed with Rustoleum before assembly. | 1.2689 | 0.04728 | 119 | 91 | 24 | 4 |
1048 | It’s hot, but the SPF is really good. | 1.2687 | 0.04873 | 134 | 106 | 20 | 8 |
1049 | It's not the heat...it's the humidity. | 1.2687 | 0.04389 | 134 | 102 | 28 | 4 |
1050 | No Dragons; see, it works! | 1.2687 | 0.04637 | 134 | 104 | 24 | 6 |
1051 | It all feels futile when the tide comes in. | 1.2687 | 0.04515 | 134 | 103 | 26 | 5 |
1052 | Zinc oxide won't protect you from slings and arrows. | 1.2683 | 0.05300 | 123 | 99 | 15 | 9 |
1053 | People just tend to just stay out of rip tides when they see me up here. | 1.2683 | 0.05172 | 123 | 98 | 17 | 8 |
1054 | I like your suit. | 1.2679 | 0.05071 | 112 | 87 | 20 | 5 |
1055 | I'm going home when the tide comes in. | 1.2677 | 0.04534 | 127 | 97 | 26 | 4 |
1056 | Tomorrow I'll wear a swimsuit. First day. Also, I'll stop stabbing sunbathers. | 1.2677 | 0.04930 | 127 | 100 | 20 | 7 |
1057 | Nice sun protection, sir! | 1.2673 | 0.04852 | 101 | 76 | 23 | 2 |
1058 | I didn’t think the Baywatch / Game of Thrones genre mash-up would be so popular. | 1.2673 | 0.05783 | 101 | 81 | 13 | 7 |
1059 | There is really more to this job than it looks | 1.2673 | 0.05430 | 101 | 79 | 17 | 5 |
1060 | Trust me, I know how to guard a life. | 1.2672 | 0.04952 | 116 | 90 | 21 | 5 |
1061 | I dig you the moat. | 1.2672 | 0.04945 | 131 | 104 | 19 | 8 |
1062 | Rust is a great color for you! | 1.2671 | 0.04589 | 146 | 115 | 23 | 8 |
1063 | You guard the lives, I’ll guard the castle. | 1.2667 | 0.04954 | 135 | 108 | 18 | 9 |
1064 | It's just for the summer, then I go back to Yale. | 1.2667 | 0.04602 | 150 | 119 | 22 | 9 |
1065 | You’re over-interpreting. Sometimes a lance is only a lance”. | 1.2667 | 0.05624 | 105 | 84 | 14 | 7 |
1066 | Windmills don't look that bad now... | 1.2667 | 0.04984 | 120 | 94 | 20 | 6 |
1067 | I thought the memo read Hun block. | 1.2667 | 0.04602 | 150 | 119 | 22 | 9 |
1068 | You take care of the ocean. I'll deal with the moat. | 1.2667 | 0.05257 | 120 | 96 | 16 | 8 |
1069 | Is it hot in here or is it me? | 1.2667 | 0.04504 | 150 | 118 | 24 | 8 |
1070 | If the moat is breached I'll throw over the boiling oil and boulders. You release the killer crabs and signal the sea gulls to drop their payloads. | 1.2662 | 0.05062 | 139 | 113 | 15 | 11 |
1071 | Hell no! I'll guard the beach while you dive in for that guy." | 1.2662 | 0.04518 | 139 | 108 | 25 | 6 |
1072 | I don’t know. It seemed like a good idea this morning. | 1.2661 | 0.04737 | 124 | 96 | 23 | 5 |
1073 | I took an oath | 1.2661 | 0.04737 | 124 | 96 | 23 | 5 |
1074 | Sharks are a lot safer than dragons. | 1.2661 | 0.04873 | 124 | 97 | 21 | 6 |
1075 | You're saying we're supposed to rescue people drowning in the moat? | 1.2661 | 0.04596 | 124 | 95 | 25 | 4 |
1076 | The job post said castle guard…should’ve finished reading the description. | 1.2661 | 0.04596 | 124 | 95 | 25 | 4 |
1077 | What do you mean there is a tide coming in | 1.2661 | 0.05317 | 109 | 86 | 17 | 6 |
1078 | I'm a little rusty at this. | 1.2657 | 0.04754 | 143 | 114 | 20 | 9 |
1079 | Your portcullis should face the other way. | 1.2656 | 0.05020 | 128 | 102 | 18 | 8 |
1080 | It's a living | 1.2656 | 0.05020 | 128 | 102 | 18 | 8 |
1081 | You call me Arthur and I’ll call you Guinevere. | 1.2656 | 0.04503 | 128 | 98 | 26 | 4 |
1082 | Hey, Lancelot...you need to keep your eyes on the ocean... | 1.2655 | 0.05186 | 113 | 89 | 18 | 6 |
1083 | How long do you think this wall can hold? | 1.2655 | 0.04707 | 113 | 86 | 24 | 3 |
1084 | Forget a moat, this castle will have a boat. | 1.2655 | 0.04707 | 113 | 86 | 24 | 3 |
1085 | I knew that a job guarding the castle was too good to be true. | 1.2653 | 0.04930 | 98 | 74 | 22 | 2 |
1086 | What? It's cheaper than sunscreen. | 1.2652 | 0.04545 | 132 | 102 | 25 | 5 |
1087 | Prince Canute. And your name? | 1.2650 | 0.04915 | 117 | 91 | 21 | 5 |
1088 | YOU TAKE THE OCEAN AND I'LL WATCH THE MOAT | 1.2650 | 0.04915 | 117 | 91 | 21 | 5 |
1089 | Hey, could you cover while I use the restroom? About 90 minutes. | 1.2650 | 0.05206 | 117 | 93 | 17 | 7 |
1090 | I'm here early for the knight shift. | 1.2647 | 0.05383 | 102 | 80 | 17 | 5 |
1091 | You probably recognize me from either Netflix or the congressional hearings. | 1.2647 | 0.04922 | 136 | 109 | 18 | 9 |
1092 | The difference between that kid’s castle and mine is night and day. | 1.2647 | 0.05009 | 102 | 78 | 21 | 3 |
1093 | I'm free after high tide if you wanna hang out. | 1.2645 | 0.04510 | 121 | 92 | 26 | 3 |
1094 | How can you guard life without a shield? | 1.2645 | 0.04806 | 121 | 94 | 22 | 5 |
1095 | "At least I don't need to think about sun screen." | 1.2645 | 0.04806 | 121 | 94 | 22 | 5 |
1096 | I'm here for the Peloponnesian War reenactment. | 1.2645 | 0.04806 | 121 | 94 | 22 | 5 |
1097 | The ad said,"become a castle guard, uniform supplied". | 1.2645 | 0.04660 | 121 | 93 | 24 | 4 |
1098 | First day back, I'm feeling a little rusty. | 1.2643 | 0.04254 | 140 | 107 | 29 | 4 |
1099 | I was told i was getting a whistle. | 1.2642 | 0.05412 | 106 | 84 | 16 | 6 |
1100 | I didn’t know it was casual Friday | 1.2642 | 0.05069 | 106 | 82 | 20 | 4 |
1101 | Don't get me wrong, there are some drawbacks, but I never get sunburned | 1.2640 | 0.04703 | 125 | 97 | 23 | 5 |
1102 | Can you guard the castle for a minute? I'm going to go change into something less medieval. | 1.2640 | 0.04839 | 125 | 98 | 21 | 6 |
1103 | Personally I hate the knight shift. | 1.2640 | 0.05098 | 125 | 100 | 17 | 8 |
1104 | My tour of duty ends at high tide | 1.2639 | 0.04406 | 144 | 112 | 26 | 6 |
1105 | I told them, 'no job is too small,' so here I am. | 1.2637 | 0.06019 | 91 | 73 | 12 | 6 |
1106 | I think we’ll need a bigger moat. | 1.2636 | 0.04776 | 110 | 84 | 23 | 3 |
1107 | I'm part of a GOP grant to prevent sandcastle moat drownings. | 1.2636 | 0.05114 | 110 | 86 | 19 | 5 |
1108 | After the tide comes, I'm free for dinner | 1.2636 | 0.05114 | 110 | 86 | 19 | 5 |
1109 | I always fancied working abroad but the job description stated “Côte d’Armour” | 1.2636 | 0.05114 | 110 | 86 | 19 | 5 |
1110 | Yeah… I should have listened to my friend who warned me that the architect was the same one used by Spinal Tap for their Stonehenge set. | 1.2636 | 0.04862 | 129 | 102 | 20 | 7 |
1111 | All this could be yours. | 1.2632 | 0.04834 | 114 | 88 | 22 | 4 |
1112 | Yeah, the pay’s not great but I do get to work from home. | 1.2632 | 0.04671 | 114 | 87 | 24 | 3 |
1113 | There was this time machine. I pressed “future.” | 1.2632 | 0.04834 | 114 | 88 | 22 | 4 |
1114 | My shift is over in a half an hour. So, would you like a tour of the castle? | 1.2632 | 0.05294 | 114 | 91 | 16 | 7 |
1115 | You get the next one. I sink like a rock. | 1.2627 | 0.05025 | 118 | 93 | 19 | 6 |
1116 | Did you catch the Jaws marathon last night? | 1.2627 | 0.05305 | 118 | 95 | 15 | 8 |
1117 | Sure,my rescues are rusty but my dermatologist approves. | 1.2627 | 0.04878 | 118 | 92 | 21 | 5 |
1118 | The enemy is coming in waves. | 1.2626 | 0.05094 | 99 | 76 | 20 | 3 |
1119 | When I abdicated, I was promised a castle. | 1.2623 | 0.05309 | 122 | 99 | 14 | 9 |
1120 | It looked bigger in the photo | 1.2623 | 0.04771 | 122 | 95 | 22 | 5 |
1121 | I'm not sure you're taking this seriously, Judy | 1.2621 | 0.05155 | 103 | 80 | 19 | 4 |
1122 | My tan is going to be awful. | 1.2619 | 0.04533 | 126 | 97 | 25 | 4 |
1123 | Here, at least I have some control over my domain. | 1.2617 | 0.05200 | 107 | 84 | 18 | 5 |
1124 | I love being able to work remotely. | 1.2617 | 0.05367 | 107 | 85 | 16 | 6 |
1125 | It's just a temporary job. | 1.2615 | 0.04829 | 130 | 103 | 20 | 7 |
1126 | I can't get this armor wet, so... | 1.2615 | 0.04575 | 130 | 101 | 24 | 5 |
1127 | The Hoff. Still bay watching but prefer knight sitting these days. | 1.2613 | 0.05073 | 111 | 87 | 19 | 5 |
1128 | First time at Loch Ness? | 1.2613 | 0.04909 | 111 | 86 | 21 | 4 |
1129 | My major foe is melanoma. | 1.2613 | 0.05073 | 111 | 87 | 19 | 5 |
1130 | Sorry I’m late. We had a real battle at my other job. | 1.2612 | 0.04486 | 134 | 104 | 25 | 5 |
1131 | 'Tis a grand, impregnable fortress until the tide comes in. | 1.2609 | 0.04797 | 115 | 89 | 22 | 4 |
1132 | On the other hand, I don't need sun-tan lotion. | 1.2609 | 0.04797 | 115 | 89 | 22 | 4 |
1133 | So there I was, beating on, boat against the current, and now I find myself borne back ceaselessly into the past | 1.2605 | 0.05128 | 119 | 95 | 17 | 7 |
1134 | A swim sounds great, but I just ate 30 minutes ago. | 1.2605 | 0.04693 | 119 | 92 | 23 | 4 |
1135 | Last time I sat in a high chair someone was feeding me. | 1.2605 | 0.04842 | 119 | 93 | 21 | 5 |
1136 | Everyone loves knights on the beach. | 1.2596 | 0.04926 | 104 | 80 | 21 | 3 |
1137 | I watch out for the little people. | 1.2596 | 0.05465 | 104 | 83 | 15 | 6 |
1138 | I’ll take care of the dragons, if you’ll handle the sharks. | 1.2593 | 0.05639 | 108 | 88 | 12 | 8 |
1139 | Beware of Trojan horseflies | 1.2593 | 0.04579 | 135 | 106 | 23 | 6 |
1140 | I'm guarding the castle. | 1.2590 | 0.04605 | 139 | 110 | 22 | 7 |
1141 | Would you mind suntan oiling my joints? | 1.2590 | 0.04127 | 139 | 106 | 30 | 3 |
1142 | time to suit up | 1.2589 | 0.05033 | 112 | 88 | 19 | 5 |
1143 | It’s Castle Hasselhoff. | 1.2587 | 0.04517 | 143 | 113 | 23 | 7 |
1144 | No, Jenn, I'm not really a Casual Friday kind of guy. | 1.2586 | 0.04761 | 116 | 90 | 22 | 4 |
1145 | Sharks | 1.2583 | 0.04659 | 120 | 93 | 23 | 4 |
1146 | I'm glad they finally found someone for the knight shift. | 1.2583 | 0.04807 | 120 | 94 | 21 | 5 |
1147 | Hail sun-bronzed goddess! Yon castle is but a token of my troth. | 1.2583 | 0.04950 | 120 | 95 | 19 | 6 |
1148 | Haven't done this for a while, so I'm a little rusty. | 1.2583 | 0.04950 | 120 | 95 | 19 | 6 |
1149 | It's called "Sandalot.' | 1.2583 | 0.05090 | 120 | 96 | 17 | 7 |
1150 | I get off at high tide... | 1.2583 | 0.04348 | 120 | 91 | 27 | 2 |
1151 | A castle for your thoughts. | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1152 | Greece, Rome , the USSR.- All washed away by the sands of time. Well, not on my watch! | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1153 | The tide is coming in. I’m no longer master of my domain. | 1.2578 | 0.04471 | 128 | 99 | 25 | 4 |
1154 | My knight job is so much easier than my day job! | 1.2578 | 0.04471 | 128 | 99 | 25 | 4 |
1155 | Different agendas, yes. But not incompatible. | 1.2577 | 0.04922 | 97 | 74 | 21 | 2 |
1156 | It could be worse: I used to be a serf. | 1.2576 | 0.04385 | 132 | 102 | 26 | 4 |
1157 | I definitely have a plan. | 1.2574 | 0.04804 | 101 | 77 | 22 | 2 |
1158 | Do you have a minute to talk about The Crusades? . | 1.2574 | 0.05387 | 101 | 80 | 16 | 5 |
1159 | It’s not really as glamorous as it looks. | 1.2574 | 0.05006 | 101 | 78 | 20 | 3 |
1160 | The biggest threats are high tides and dragon poop." | 1.2571 | 0.04462 | 140 | 110 | 24 | 6 |
1161 | ‘Phasing all the old jobs out, so I took the first job the didn’t require me to know how to Zoom.’ | 1.2571 | 0.05069 | 105 | 82 | 19 | 4 |
1162 | Would you mind oiling my back? | 1.2569 | 0.05438 | 109 | 88 | 14 | 7 |
1163 | I did graduate last in my class. How did you know? | 1.2569 | 0.05438 | 109 | 88 | 14 | 7 |
1164 | Hey. Do you have any WD40? | 1.2569 | 0.05279 | 109 | 87 | 16 | 6 |
1165 | I grabbed the wrong suit, didn’t I? | 1.2569 | 0.05438 | 109 | 88 | 14 | 7 |
1166 | The lesser known Roman Legion SPFQR | 1.2566 | 0.05149 | 113 | 90 | 17 | 6 |
1167 | Don’t mind me, just guarding my castle here. | 1.2566 | 0.04833 | 113 | 88 | 21 | 4 |
1168 | You take the ones in the water. And I'll get anybody that tries to storm the castle. | 1.2564 | 0.04567 | 117 | 90 | 24 | 3 |
1169 | I don't do water rescues. | 1.2562 | 0.04317 | 121 | 92 | 27 | 2 |
1170 | You take the ocean. I got the moat covered. | 1.2562 | 0.04474 | 121 | 93 | 25 | 3 |
1171 | The knight shift isn’t for everyone. | 1.2560 | 0.04806 | 125 | 99 | 20 | 6 |
1172 | I am conducting a special military operation here. | 1.2560 | 0.04670 | 125 | 98 | 22 | 5 |
1173 | Thankfully the moat only comes up to my ankles. | 1.2558 | 0.05774 | 86 | 68 | 14 | 4 |
1174 | Knight Rider was way better than Baywatch. | 1.2558 | 0.04440 | 129 | 100 | 25 | 4 |
1175 | Don’t mind me, I’ll just be here until high tide. | 1.2558 | 0.04302 | 129 | 99 | 27 | 3 |
1176 | spf 1000. But the moat helps, too | 1.2556 | 0.04732 | 133 | 106 | 20 | 7 |
1177 | Silly me I’ve forgotten the WD-40. Guinevere, what say you? | 1.2556 | 0.04356 | 133 | 103 | 26 | 4 |
1178 | If the serf rises, we slay the bastard. | 1.2555 | 0.04520 | 137 | 108 | 23 | 6 |
1179 | Why don’t you focus on your job so I can focus on mine? | 1.2555 | 0.04972 | 137 | 112 | 15 | 10 |
1180 | Great, I’ll watch the castle. | 1.2555 | 0.04520 | 137 | 108 | 23 | 6 |
1181 | Do you guys get overtime? | 1.2551 | 0.05487 | 98 | 78 | 15 | 5 |
1182 | Be sure to keep an eye on the moat, too. | 1.2551 | 0.05487 | 98 | 78 | 15 | 5 |
1183 | I think we're being invaded by ants. | 1.2551 | 0.05292 | 98 | 77 | 17 | 4 |
1184 | You try being homeless twice a day. | 1.2551 | 0.05292 | 98 | 77 | 17 | 4 |
1185 | Uhhh I just use SPF 50, but your armor is cool. | 1.2551 | 0.05089 | 98 | 76 | 19 | 3 |
1186 | Well, it looks like it's sink or swim. | 1.2549 | 0.05340 | 102 | 81 | 16 | 5 |
1187 | The King is all moat and no castle | 1.2547 | 0.05202 | 106 | 84 | 17 | 5 |
1188 | Yes, floating in armor is hard. | 1.2547 | 0.04845 | 106 | 82 | 21 | 3 |
1189 | Whatever. My dad told me ladies dig a guy in uniform." | 1.2547 | 0.05372 | 106 | 85 | 15 | 6 |
1190 | Because I didn't read the fine print. | 1.2545 | 0.04734 | 110 | 85 | 22 | 3 |
1191 | I say old chap! Can you scratch my back? | 1.2545 | 0.05074 | 110 | 87 | 18 | 5 |
1192 | These jellyfish won't stand a chance! | 1.2544 | 0.04460 | 114 | 87 | 25 | 2 |
1193 | You watch the swimmers, I’ll guard the castle. | 1.2544 | 0.04282 | 114 | 86 | 27 | 1 |
1194 | Last time, I got a sunburn. | 1.2542 | 0.04842 | 118 | 93 | 20 | 5 |
1195 | King Arthur wanted a knight look over the castle. | 1.2542 | 0.04990 | 118 | 94 | 18 | 6 |
1196 | Thanks.This armour has an spf of 1400. I think I'm covered. | 1.2542 | 0.04842 | 118 | 93 | 20 | 5 |
1197 | I was promoted to Head Guard of Trump’s Castle | 1.2542 | 0.04990 | 118 | 94 | 18 | 6 |
1198 | The nature of this job really has changed. | 1.2542 | 0.04990 | 118 | 94 | 18 | 6 |
1199 | I'm dressed up as an Ancient Roman lifeguard. | 1.2541 | 0.04737 | 122 | 96 | 21 | 5 |
1200 | MoatWatch." Why do you ask | 1.2541 | 0.04592 | 122 | 95 | 23 | 4 |
1201 | So after the wedding, the teeny tiny prince and teeny tiny princess built a teeny tiny castle by the sea and lived there happily ever after. The end. | 1.2541 | 0.04737 | 122 | 96 | 21 | 5 |
1202 | It's kind of hard to reapply sunscreen. | 1.2540 | 0.04904 | 126 | 101 | 18 | 7 |
1203 | You take the sea; my water fighting skills are rusty | 1.2540 | 0.05032 | 126 | 102 | 16 | 8 |
1204 | My doctor says I am too guarded around people. | 1.2538 | 0.05041 | 130 | 106 | 15 | 9 |
1205 | I'm taking over the knight shift. | 1.2537 | 0.04579 | 134 | 106 | 22 | 6 |
1206 | I'm off duty | 1.2536 | 0.04607 | 138 | 110 | 21 | 7 |
1207 | I happened to mention to my mother I like heavy metal. | 1.2527 | 0.05762 | 91 | 73 | 13 | 5 |
1208 | One of us is going in. It's time to sink or swim. | 1.2526 | 0.04956 | 95 | 73 | 20 | 2 |
1209 | I defend the castle to the death, but I don't do water. | 1.2526 | 0.05177 | 95 | 74 | 18 | 3 |
1210 | My other castle is bigger. | 1.2525 | 0.05245 | 99 | 78 | 17 | 4 |
1211 | Wanna grab a bite later? I get off work as soon as high tide comes in. | 1.2525 | 0.04618 | 99 | 75 | 23 | 1 |
1212 | I'll do the damsels in distress. You do everyone else. | 1.2525 | 0.05438 | 99 | 79 | 15 | 5 |
1213 | Quiet day huh? | 1.2525 | 0.05245 | 99 | 78 | 17 | 4 |
1214 | Take it from me, it’s better to stay in school. | 1.2525 | 0.05245 | 99 | 78 | 17 | 4 |
1215 | Too literal, right? | 1.2525 | 0.05245 | 99 | 78 | 17 | 4 |
1216 | Let’s compromise: you handle drowners, I’ll handle dragons. | 1.2524 | 0.04921 | 103 | 80 | 20 | 3 |
1217 | Would you care to be Queen for a Day? | 1.2524 | 0.04921 | 103 | 80 | 20 | 3 |
1218 | I hope the Royals come out before the tide turns | 1.2524 | 0.04723 | 103 | 79 | 22 | 2 |
1219 | I'm keeping a lookout for any Trojan seahorses. | 1.2524 | 0.05470 | 103 | 83 | 14 | 6 |
1220 | Who am I?? Just maybe I am your knight in shining armor | 1.2524 | 0.05293 | 103 | 82 | 16 | 5 |
1221 | In our kingdom everyone drowns. | 1.2524 | 0.05110 | 103 | 81 | 18 | 4 |
1222 | When I signed up for the Night’s Watch, I had something way different in mind. | 1.2524 | 0.05641 | 103 | 84 | 12 | 7 |
1223 | It's a temp job. | 1.2523 | 0.05327 | 107 | 86 | 15 | 6 |
1224 | Yeah? Well, your attitude is not very buoyant. | 1.2523 | 0.05802 | 107 | 89 | 9 | 9 |
1225 | Dragons aren't my thing anymore, I mostly talk about sun protection." | 1.2523 | 0.05159 | 107 | 85 | 17 | 5 |
1226 | I call dibs on any damsels out there. | 1.2523 | 0.05327 | 107 | 86 | 15 | 6 |
1227 | I came, I saw, I bought a condo. | 1.2523 | 0.04805 | 107 | 83 | 21 | 3 |
1228 | Trust me, you don't want to give mouth-to-mouth to a dragon. | 1.2523 | 0.04868 | 111 | 87 | 20 | 4 |
1229 | SPF 1000 equivalent. And you? | 1.2523 | 0.05194 | 111 | 89 | 16 | 6 |
1230 | Same job, different costume | 1.2523 | 0.04868 | 111 | 87 | 20 | 4 |
1231 | I think I'm at the wrong castle. | 1.2523 | 0.04868 | 111 | 87 | 20 | 4 |
1232 | i'm wearing the same thing you're wearing under this armor | 1.2523 | 0.05034 | 111 | 88 | 18 | 5 |
1233 | I'm just freelancing. | 1.2522 | 0.04759 | 115 | 90 | 21 | 4 |
1234 | Wait, we have to save people? | 1.2522 | 0.04596 | 115 | 89 | 23 | 3 |
1235 | 'Guard the moat,' he told me. So I guard the moat. | 1.2522 | 0.04426 | 115 | 88 | 25 | 2 |
1236 | My White Satin's caught up in those damned 'supply chain issues.' | 1.2522 | 0.04916 | 115 | 91 | 19 | 5 |
1237 | Your doctor said that tanning lotions were futile, not feudal! | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1238 | You watch the water, I'll take care of dragon fire. | 1.2520 | 0.04559 | 123 | 96 | 23 | 4 |
1239 | You said that was stainless, right? | 1.2520 | 0.04410 | 123 | 95 | 25 | 3 |
1240 | Shark cage. | 1.2520 | 0.04739 | 127 | 101 | 20 | 6 |
1241 | I have been working remotely since the kingdom downsized. | 1.2520 | 0.04467 | 127 | 99 | 24 | 4 |
1242 | Once you start, you’re a guard for life. | 1.2520 | 0.04869 | 127 | 102 | 18 | 7 |
1243 | Why do I always get the knight shift? | 1.2520 | 0.04869 | 127 | 102 | 18 | 7 |
1244 | Not needing sunscreen is one of the perks. | 1.2520 | 0.04325 | 127 | 98 | 26 | 3 |
1245 | They have you on the knight shift as well, huh? | 1.2519 | 0.04888 | 131 | 106 | 17 | 8 |
1246 | At first I wore it for the arrow protection, but the Sun is even more deadly | 1.2519 | 0.04299 | 135 | 105 | 26 | 4 |
1247 | This is LIFEGUARDING | 1.2519 | 0.04426 | 135 | 106 | 24 | 5 |
1248 | I'm a METHOD Lifeguard. | 1.2518 | 0.04343 | 139 | 109 | 25 | 5 |
1249 | Would you mind rubbing some Armour All on my back? | 1.2518 | 0.04343 | 139 | 109 | 25 | 5 |
1250 | Please ignore any summons for aid emanating from the moat. | 1.2500 | 0.04944 | 108 | 85 | 19 | 4 |
1251 | Yes, it's made of sand, but don't mock me. | 1.2500 | 0.05116 | 108 | 86 | 17 | 5 |
1252 | Yup, I pissed off the king. | 1.2500 | 0.05421 | 88 | 69 | 16 | 3 |
1253 | Somehow I think this new sharkproof bodysuit doesn't quite work. | 1.2500 | 0.05038 | 92 | 71 | 19 | 2 |
1254 | I certinly hope this is the high tide mark. Otherwise, I'm screwed. | 1.2500 | 0.05067 | 104 | 82 | 18 | 4 |
1255 | Sure it's small and I paid over asking price, but it was the only castle on the market. | 1.2500 | 0.04911 | 96 | 74 | 20 | 2 |
1256 | When it’s your turn, we’ll build a contemporary saltbox. | 1.2500 | 0.04830 | 112 | 88 | 20 | 4 |
1257 | It's not bad, but I do get weird tan lines. | 1.2500 | 0.05705 | 92 | 74 | 13 | 5 |
1258 | Could you hold the spear for a sec? I need to get my seahorse. | 1.2500 | 0.04660 | 112 | 87 | 22 | 3 |
1259 | Actually I am on a sabbatical from my job at American Express’ | 1.2500 | 0.04561 | 116 | 90 | 23 | 3 |
1260 | Yeah it's imaginary, but when you think about it, my job's a lot harder than yours. | 1.2500 | 0.05030 | 116 | 93 | 17 | 6 |
1261 | You do your job, I’ll do mine. | 1.2500 | 0.04706 | 128 | 102 | 20 | 6 |
1262 | ‘You’re merely certified. Yet, I am Legend.’ | 1.2500 | 0.05752 | 100 | 82 | 11 | 7 |
1263 | And they think you're hot! | 1.2500 | 0.05444 | 108 | 88 | 13 | 7 |
1264 | With the visor down it's SPF-1 million. | 1.2500 | 0.04944 | 108 | 85 | 19 | 4 |
1265 | That 'my kingdom for a horse' line never made sense to me before now... | 1.2500 | 0.05198 | 100 | 79 | 17 | 4 |
1266 | I gotta pee. Can you watch the tiny soldiers by the moat for a few minutes? | 1.2500 | 0.04766 | 108 | 84 | 21 | 3 |
1267 | I'm here because the king made a joke that was taken literally. | 1.2500 | 0.05030 | 116 | 93 | 17 | 6 |
1268 | I think I misheard when they said night shift | 1.2500 | 0.05056 | 120 | 97 | 16 | 7 |
1269 | Hi Sandy, I'm Lance. | 1.2500 | 0.04622 | 120 | 94 | 22 | 4 |
1270 | I wanted a night job but this was the best I could get! | 1.2500 | 0.04830 | 112 | 88 | 20 | 4 |
1271 | Do you know any good ways to get sand out of your suit? | 1.2500 | 0.04722 | 116 | 91 | 21 | 4 |
1272 | Mine, if by land; yours, if by sea. | 1.2500 | 0.05152 | 112 | 90 | 16 | 6 |
1273 | If you go near my castle, I'll stab you with my spear. | 1.2500 | 0.05056 | 120 | 97 | 16 | 7 |
1274 | It’s similar to my last job, but the culture change has been a breath of fresh air. | 1.2500 | 0.05283 | 108 | 87 | 15 | 6 |
1275 | You look like you know what you're doing. Do you think the moat is big enough? | 1.2500 | 0.05270 | 92 | 72 | 17 | 3 |
1276 | You never know when the Vikings will arrive! | 1.2500 | 0.04771 | 120 | 95 | 20 | 5 |
1277 | After COVID, everything seems so small and inconsequential | 1.2500 | 0.05705 | 92 | 74 | 13 | 5 |
1278 | You said that size doesn't matter! | 1.2500 | 0.05389 | 100 | 80 | 15 | 5 |
1279 | It's too nice out today to storm the castle. | 1.2500 | 0.05541 | 96 | 77 | 14 | 5 |
1280 | I get off after the tide comes in. How about you? | 1.2500 | 0.04548 | 140 | 112 | 21 | 7 |
1281 | It's not easy to defend when they come in waves. | 1.2500 | 0.05883 | 88 | 71 | 12 | 5 |
1282 | I prefer this to building castles in the sky. | 1.2500 | 0.04944 | 108 | 85 | 19 | 4 |
1283 | His majesty is on a snack break. | 1.2500 | 0.06110 | 92 | 76 | 9 | 7 |
1284 | Every castle needs a knight. | 1.2500 | 0.05030 | 116 | 93 | 17 | 6 |
1285 | Sure the Huns are pretty bad, but they have nothing on the unsupervised six year-olds! | 1.2500 | 0.05283 | 108 | 87 | 15 | 6 |
1286 | You keepeth the shore and I’ll keepeth the castle, good madame | 1.2500 | 0.04994 | 112 | 89 | 18 | 5 |
1287 | OK, and I'll handle the damsels... | 1.2500 | 0.04669 | 124 | 98 | 21 | 5 |
1288 | It’s just way more effective than SPF 100 | 1.2500 | 0.04622 | 120 | 94 | 22 | 4 |
1289 | Union rules | 1.2482 | 0.04608 | 137 | 110 | 20 | 7 |
1290 | It's shark-proof. | 1.2480 | 0.04349 | 125 | 97 | 25 | 3 |
1291 | You are going to need a bigger moat! | 1.2480 | 0.04349 | 125 | 97 | 25 | 3 |
1292 | First time? | 1.2480 | 0.04495 | 125 | 98 | 23 | 4 |
1293 | Seen many dragons yet? | 1.2479 | 0.04736 | 121 | 96 | 20 | 5 |
1294 | Guarding against Leafy Sea Dragons mostly. You? | 1.2479 | 0.04879 | 121 | 97 | 18 | 6 |
1295 | I mean, yeah, of course I'm hot, but it's the only way I know to keep those brats from kicking it down. | 1.2479 | 0.04435 | 121 | 94 | 24 | 3 |
1296 | Yeah…. But I save a lot on sunscreen. | 1.2479 | 0.04588 | 121 | 95 | 22 | 4 |
1297 | It's not that I need armor, I just get really bad sunburns. | 1.2479 | 0.04435 | 121 | 94 | 24 | 3 |
1298 | For the second season of “Bayeux Watch,” we'll have better special effects. | 1.2479 | 0.05018 | 121 | 98 | 16 | 7 |
1299 | I thought the guy said he needed a Knight guard. | 1.2479 | 0.05018 | 121 | 98 | 16 | 7 |
1300 | Wait till you see the dragon. | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 93 | 19 | 5 |
1301 | I detect an undercurrent in your thoughts. | 1.2479 | 0.04991 | 117 | 94 | 17 | 6 |
1302 | That's the longest garter snake that I have ever seen! | 1.2479 | 0.04361 | 117 | 90 | 25 | 2 |
1303 | So what SPF are YOU using? | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 93 | 19 | 5 |
1304 | It may be a castle made of sand, but it’s mine and I’m going to defend it. | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 93 | 19 | 5 |
1305 | I’m still master of my domain. | 1.2479 | 0.04527 | 117 | 91 | 23 | 3 |
1306 | I'm just here until high tide. | 1.2478 | 0.04792 | 113 | 89 | 20 | 4 |
1307 | Not only am I your knight in shining armor, when I rescue you, I won't get shark-bit. | 1.2478 | 0.05263 | 113 | 92 | 14 | 7 |
1308 | My seven years at USC prepared me for this moment. | 1.2478 | 0.04954 | 113 | 90 | 18 | 5 |
1309 | You’re probably right, but if a dragon appears…! | 1.2478 | 0.04954 | 113 | 90 | 18 | 5 |
1310 | Yonder lies my father's sand castle. | 1.2478 | 0.04792 | 113 | 89 | 20 | 4 |
1311 | They wait for high-tide before they storm the castle! | 1.2477 | 0.05399 | 109 | 89 | 13 | 7 |
1312 | sunscreen just hasn't been working for me | 1.2477 | 0.04354 | 109 | 83 | 25 | 1 |
1313 | At low tide, it’s an impenetrable fortress. | 1.2477 | 0.04728 | 109 | 85 | 21 | 3 |
1314 | Have you got some sunscreen? | 1.2477 | 0.04728 | 109 | 85 | 21 | 3 |
1315 | The real enemy is rust, though. | 1.2476 | 0.05203 | 105 | 84 | 16 | 5 |
1316 | Go out for a grog later? | 1.2476 | 0.04645 | 105 | 81 | 22 | 2 |
1317 | I built the castle and I will defend until I rust | 1.2475 | 0.05152 | 101 | 80 | 17 | 4 |
1318 | Fear not, fair maiden, the castle shalt not be breached on my watch. | 1.2474 | 0.04867 | 97 | 75 | 20 | 2 |
1319 | Keep an eye on that kid with the horse float | 1.2474 | 0.05490 | 97 | 78 | 14 | 5 |
1320 | Haven't you ever heard of Bay Watch Knights | 1.2474 | 0.05083 | 97 | 76 | 18 | 3 |
1321 | I think I didn’t read the job description carefully enough. | 1.2474 | 0.05490 | 97 | 78 | 14 | 5 |
1322 | Sure, it's got an SPF rating of 100, but that's more than offset by the buoyancy rating. | 1.2474 | 0.05083 | 97 | 76 | 18 | 3 |
1323 | You expect to guard lives with a whistle? | 1.2474 | 0.05083 | 97 | 76 | 18 | 3 |
1324 | I’m just saying, it’s more than an issue of jurisdiction. | 1.2474 | 0.05290 | 97 | 77 | 16 | 4 |
1325 | Watch the Lighthouse. 1 by land, 2 by sea. | 1.2472 | 0.05124 | 89 | 69 | 18 | 2 |
1326 | Cover me. I may be a little rusty. | 1.2460 | 0.04463 | 126 | 99 | 23 | 4 |
1327 | I thought there'd be more dragons. | 1.2459 | 0.04555 | 122 | 96 | 22 | 4 |
1328 | So, it winds up—seeking the Holy Grail is kinda aimless and loose. | 1.2459 | 0.04981 | 122 | 99 | 16 | 7 |
1329 | Yes, I suppose it could be used against sharks. | 1.2458 | 0.04329 | 118 | 91 | 25 | 2 |
1330 | I think we're gonna need a bigger moat... | 1.2458 | 0.04805 | 118 | 94 | 19 | 5 |
1331 | It's a little hot,but it beats skin cancer. | 1.2458 | 0.04953 | 118 | 95 | 17 | 6 |
1332 | Explain "surfer." | 1.2458 | 0.04493 | 118 | 92 | 23 | 3 |
1333 | Damn, I forgot my whistle. | 1.2458 | 0.04329 | 118 | 91 | 25 | 2 |
1334 | Laugh all you want but no one has come up with better sun protection in three millennia. | 1.2458 | 0.04652 | 118 | 93 | 21 | 4 |
1335 | I’m here because of the re-moat possibility the tide will say high to my castle. | 1.2458 | 0.04953 | 118 | 95 | 17 | 6 |
1336 | You wouldn’t happen to have any WD 2 on you? | 1.2458 | 0.04493 | 118 | 92 | 23 | 3 |
1337 | Next week I'm doing Windsor Castle though. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1338 | Do you happen to know the SPF of Steel polish? | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1339 | C’mon, play along. You’re a damsel in distress. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1340 | Actually, I didn't even see it there. | 1.2455 | 0.04509 | 110 | 85 | 23 | 2 |
1341 | Just burnishing my resume, why do you ask? | 1.2455 | 0.05033 | 110 | 88 | 17 | 5 |
1342 | Could you guard my castle? I need to go pee. | 1.2455 | 0.05033 | 110 | 88 | 17 | 5 |
1343 | So...you building that castle seems a tiny bit passive-aggressive. | 1.2453 | 0.05159 | 106 | 85 | 16 | 5 |
1344 | I’m working towards body positivity. | 1.2453 | 0.05159 | 106 | 85 | 16 | 5 |
1345 | I’m not mansplaining. I’m educating on the finer points of realm protection. | 1.2451 | 0.05474 | 102 | 83 | 13 | 6 |
1346 | Guard here often? | 1.2451 | 0.04914 | 102 | 80 | 19 | 3 |
1347 | I just feel like this job is underutilizing my skill set and lacking bouyancy. | 1.2451 | 0.04712 | 102 | 79 | 21 | 2 |
1348 | Your shield has a fatal flaw. Hold it up to your chest I'll show you. | 1.2451 | 0.05294 | 102 | 82 | 15 | 5 |
1349 | SPF 1032, why do you ask? | 1.2449 | 0.05242 | 98 | 78 | 16 | 4 |
1350 | Wrong, the answer is moot! | 1.2449 | 0.06164 | 98 | 83 | 6 | 9 |
1351 | It’s actually not that hot under here. I just hate putting on sunscreen. | 1.2449 | 0.04824 | 98 | 76 | 20 | 2 |
1352 | It's an easy gig. I only have to work until high tide and I don't need to wear sunscreen. | 1.2449 | 0.05037 | 98 | 77 | 18 | 3 |
1353 | Yes, that's my Castle...would you like to be my fair Maiden? | 1.2447 | 0.05596 | 94 | 76 | 13 | 5 |
1354 | Oh,please. Sand in your crack is your only complaint? | 1.2447 | 0.05171 | 94 | 74 | 17 | 3 |
1355 | No,I just guard them. Building them is a union job. | 1.2447 | 0.05796 | 94 | 77 | 11 | 6 |
1356 | The armor rusts, so I'm glad that the moat isn't deep. | 1.2444 | 0.05544 | 90 | 72 | 14 | 4 |
1357 | I have to admit it's a bit of a letdown after tilting at windmills for so many years. | 1.2444 | 0.05314 | 90 | 71 | 16 | 3 |
1358 | It’s pretty cool when the moat fills up.. | 1.2444 | 0.05314 | 90 | 71 | 16 | 3 |
1359 | You guard the water, I'll guard the castle. | 1.2441 | 0.04289 | 127 | 99 | 25 | 3 |
1360 | I'm only a guard, but if this posting goes well I'll be promoted to knight and I move to the big castle. So are you new here too? | 1.2439 | 0.04944 | 123 | 100 | 16 | 7 |
1361 | I say there......did you know what time the tide comes in..? | 1.2439 | 0.04667 | 123 | 98 | 20 | 5 |
1362 | This one's yours Marion...I'm not qualified to save serpents. | 1.2437 | 0.04769 | 119 | 95 | 19 | 5 |
1363 | You seen any leviathans today? | 1.2435 | 0.04718 | 115 | 91 | 20 | 4 |
1364 | I'm hoping to expand my territory gradually. | 1.2435 | 0.04553 | 115 | 90 | 22 | 3 |
1365 | I'm sure I could lay siege to it if I could only get out of this chair. | 1.2435 | 0.04718 | 115 | 91 | 20 | 4 |
1366 | If someone falls in the moat, I'm counting on you to rescue them. | 1.2434 | 0.04476 | 152 | 124 | 19 | 9 |
1367 | There's no better SPF | 1.2432 | 0.04992 | 111 | 89 | 17 | 5 |
1368 | Wait til high tide, then the armor will make sense. | 1.2432 | 0.04992 | 111 | 89 | 17 | 5 |
1369 | I know it's not to scale but it was built in a day. | 1.2432 | 0.04826 | 111 | 88 | 19 | 4 |
1370 | If you rescue any of my vassals, I'll pay you three ducats. | 1.2432 | 0.04826 | 111 | 88 | 19 | 4 |
1371 | It’s my new shift—day knight saving time. | 1.2432 | 0.05154 | 111 | 90 | 15 | 6 |
1372 | It's not much, but it is home. I had to beat five other cash offers to get it. And it is dragon season, ya know. | 1.2432 | 0.04992 | 111 | 89 | 17 | 5 |
1373 | I’m fine if you stay, as long as you don’t touch my kingdom. | 1.2430 | 0.04372 | 107 | 82 | 24 | 1 |
1374 | I was told "Knight-shift by the castle," Easy mistake." | 1.2427 | 0.04871 | 103 | 81 | 19 | 3 |
1375 | Could you quit saving those we throw into the moat, please?! | 1.2424 | 0.04782 | 99 | 77 | 20 | 2 |
1376 | Next time, that shark is in for a big surprise. | 1.2424 | 0.05390 | 99 | 80 | 14 | 5 |
1377 | My last job was chasing windmills. | 1.2424 | 0.05578 | 99 | 81 | 12 | 6 |
1378 | I guard it with my life. | 1.2424 | 0.04992 | 99 | 78 | 18 | 3 |
1379 | I'm here 'til the tide comes in. | 1.2424 | 0.05195 | 99 | 79 | 16 | 4 |
1380 | We’re on the look out for a trojan seahorse | 1.2424 | 0.04992 | 99 | 78 | 18 | 3 |
1381 | Don't ask me. The temp agency gave me this outfit and sent me here. | 1.2422 | 0.04539 | 128 | 102 | 21 | 5 |
1382 | I've got this, if you wanted to take a dip. | 1.2421 | 0.05337 | 95 | 76 | 15 | 4 |
1383 | I completely misread the job description. | 1.2418 | 0.05490 | 91 | 73 | 14 | 4 |
1384 | To you it’s temporary. To me it’s legend. | 1.2418 | 0.05263 | 91 | 72 | 16 | 3 |
1385 | Can you rub some polish on my backplate? | 1.2418 | 0.05025 | 91 | 71 | 18 | 2 |
1386 | My shift is over at high tide. | 1.2417 | 0.04583 | 120 | 95 | 21 | 4 |
1387 | I’ll spearhead any rescue efforts. | 1.2417 | 0.04099 | 120 | 92 | 27 | 1 |
1388 | Join the legion, they said. See the world, they said. | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1389 | I can handle anything but a water rescue | 1.2414 | 0.05656 | 87 | 70 | 13 | 4 |
1390 | You sun, I'll siege. | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1391 | As the man, I'll defend the castle against attacking hordes. While I'm doing my job, can you just keep an eye on the little ones in the water?" | 1.2414 | 0.05656 | 87 | 70 | 13 | 4 |
1392 | I was demoted to this post after a dragon incident at low tide. | 1.2414 | 0.04839 | 116 | 93 | 18 | 5 |
1393 | A king's castle needs lifeguard protection. | 1.2411 | 0.04787 | 112 | 89 | 19 | 4 |
1394 | SPF circa 1400. | 1.2411 | 0.04787 | 112 | 89 | 19 | 4 |
1395 | You guard your strip of sand, I’ll guard mine. | 1.2411 | 0.04060 | 112 | 85 | 27 | 0 |
1396 | No spf lotion. The supply chain. Whatever that is | 1.2411 | 0.04616 | 112 | 88 | 21 | 3 |
1397 | Oh, this is SPF 1 million. | 1.2411 | 0.04616 | 112 | 88 | 21 | 3 |
1398 | You won't swim with that on. | 1.2411 | 0.04787 | 112 | 89 | 19 | 4 |
1399 | My therapist told me I should live out my childhood dreams. Tomorrow I am dressing as a lion tamer and going to the zoo! | 1.2411 | 0.05112 | 112 | 91 | 15 | 6 |
1400 | It has it’s advantages. Right now, I’m steaming hot dogs under my helmet. | 1.2407 | 0.04720 | 108 | 85 | 20 | 3 |
1401 | I'll watch the ones inside the moat. | 1.2407 | 0.05241 | 108 | 88 | 14 | 6 |
1402 | Saving lives? I’m here to be your knight in shining armor. | 1.2407 | 0.05241 | 108 | 88 | 14 | 6 |
1403 | Well, at least I'm prepared for the great hermit crab uprising! | 1.2405 | 0.05469 | 79 | 62 | 15 | 2 |
1404 | I’m on retainer until high tide. | 1.2404 | 0.05020 | 104 | 83 | 17 | 4 |
1405 | Sir Sandelot, reporting for duty. | 1.2404 | 0.05020 | 104 | 83 | 17 | 4 |
1406 | It used to be bigger! | 1.2404 | 0.05020 | 104 | 83 | 17 | 4 |
1407 | Sunglasses! I KNEW I forgot something! | 1.2404 | 0.05202 | 104 | 84 | 15 | 5 |
1408 | I had two buyers, each offering full price and taking as is before I even finished the moat. | 1.2403 | 0.04640 | 129 | 104 | 19 | 6 |
1409 | If you see someone drowning in the moat, just leave them. | 1.2400 | 0.05131 | 125 | 104 | 12 | 9 |
1410 | If you mention how you invented aqueducts one more time, I swear I’m gonna aqueduct tape your mouth shut | 1.2400 | 0.04948 | 100 | 79 | 18 | 3 |
1411 | Hath thou grease for mine sticky joints? | 1.2400 | 0.04948 | 100 | 79 | 18 | 3 |
1412 | Sunscreen? No, but I have WD-40 if you need it. | 1.2400 | 0.04948 | 100 | 79 | 18 | 3 |
1413 | ‘Chasing Dragons’ IS my vocation AND hobby. Why do you ask? | 1.2400 | 0.04600 | 125 | 100 | 20 | 5 |
1414 | Pray tell, how many mushrooms did you consume? | 1.2400 | 0.05707 | 100 | 83 | 10 | 7 |
1415 | You know that whistle won’t do much | 1.2400 | 0.05341 | 100 | 81 | 14 | 5 |
1416 | It’s not the size of the castle; it’s the long lasting knight that counts.” | 1.2400 | 0.04740 | 100 | 78 | 20 | 2 |
1417 | You guard your way, I'll guard mine. And I won't get sunburned. | 1.2397 | 0.04983 | 121 | 99 | 15 | 7 |
1418 | I will defend young Princess Sarah's castle to my dying breath, be it from invading savages, the encroachment of the sea, or that Jimmy kid over there. | 1.2397 | 0.04983 | 121 | 99 | 15 | 7 |
1419 | I don’t get to do much on the job, but it pays well. | 1.2397 | 0.04698 | 121 | 97 | 19 | 5 |
1420 | I don't think they have flood insurance | 1.2396 | 0.05287 | 96 | 77 | 15 | 4 |
1421 | The ad stated: ‘Life guard wanted; experience required.’ Why are you here? | 1.2396 | 0.05490 | 96 | 78 | 13 | 5 |
1422 | We’re safe. I raised the drawbridge. | 1.2396 | 0.05287 | 96 | 77 | 15 | 4 |
1423 | Let’s agree to disagree about saving people in the moat. | 1.2396 | 0.05075 | 96 | 76 | 17 | 3 |
1424 | Mom said If I build it she will come . .plus it will keep me out of trouble . . | 1.2393 | 0.04953 | 117 | 95 | 16 | 6 |
1425 | It’s called jurisdiction. . . Look it up. | 1.2393 | 0.05242 | 117 | 97 | 12 | 8 |
1426 | You surf,me turf! | 1.2391 | 0.05651 | 92 | 75 | 12 | 5 |
1427 | I use a metallic based sunscreen. | 1.2391 | 0.05436 | 92 | 74 | 14 | 4 |
1428 | They don't build castles the way they used to!" | 1.2391 | 0.05212 | 92 | 73 | 16 | 3 |
1429 | After more than twenty generations, this is the inheritance that I've been left with. | 1.2391 | 0.05212 | 92 | 73 | 16 | 3 |
1430 | Jousting just doesn’t pay what it used to | 1.2391 | 0.05436 | 92 | 74 | 14 | 4 |
1431 | I guess l’m still working remotely. | 1.2389 | 0.04749 | 113 | 90 | 19 | 4 |
1432 | We're gonna need a bigger moat. | 1.2389 | 0.04749 | 113 | 90 | 19 | 4 |
1433 | Thou must be the new hire. | 1.2389 | 0.05071 | 113 | 92 | 15 | 6 |
1434 | Let's see who saves more lives today. | 1.2388 | 0.04261 | 134 | 106 | 24 | 4 |
1435 | I guess you didn't watch yesterday's Shark Week. | 1.2386 | 0.05359 | 88 | 70 | 15 | 3 |
1436 | Unequal uniform requirements? I don’t see it. | 1.2386 | 0.05598 | 88 | 71 | 13 | 4 |
1437 | Do you have any sunscreen I could borrow? | 1.2385 | 0.04496 | 109 | 85 | 22 | 2 |
1438 | Yeah, it is a little uncomfortable, but I save a lot on sunscreen. | 1.2385 | 0.04496 | 109 | 85 | 22 | 2 |
1439 | Sharks? No. The spear is for dragons. | 1.2385 | 0.05031 | 109 | 88 | 16 | 5 |
1440 | No, I don’t have any sunscreen. | 1.2385 | 0.04608 | 130 | 105 | 19 | 6 |
1441 | I’ve got dibs on any damsels in distress out there. | 1.2385 | 0.04608 | 130 | 105 | 19 | 6 |
1442 | The real challenge is chafing. | 1.2381 | 0.04977 | 105 | 84 | 17 | 4 |
1443 | You're kidding? Really? All this for nothing? What's high tide? | 1.2381 | 0.04977 | 105 | 84 | 17 | 4 |
1444 | SPF 1000, and they throw in the lance. | 1.2381 | 0.04704 | 126 | 102 | 18 | 6 |
1445 | I don't remember asking how you identify. | 1.2381 | 0.05332 | 105 | 86 | 13 | 6 |
1446 | I'm here to defend against CRT. | 1.2381 | 0.04789 | 105 | 83 | 19 | 3 |
1447 | Michael, I'm sorry, but no one wears knight's armor when he forgets his bathing suit. | 1.2381 | 0.05501 | 105 | 87 | 11 | 7 |
1448 | It’s my way to fight rising sea levels. | 1.2381 | 0.04704 | 126 | 102 | 18 | 6 |
1449 | Could you save the next one? I’m a little rusty. | 1.2376 | 0.04699 | 101 | 79 | 20 | 2 |
1450 | Even sand dollars have dropped in value. | 1.2376 | 0.05103 | 101 | 81 | 16 | 4 |
1451 | Watch out for the Trojan seahorses. | 1.2376 | 0.05103 | 101 | 81 | 16 | 4 |
1452 | I'm only here until the tide turns. | 1.2373 | 0.04611 | 118 | 94 | 20 | 4 |
1453 | In the long run, it's cheaper than sun screen. | 1.2373 | 0.04611 | 118 | 94 | 20 | 4 |
1454 | Can you watch my castle for the next couple of hours while I go pee? | 1.2373 | 0.04915 | 118 | 96 | 16 | 6 |
1455 | Oooh! Shorts. | 1.2373 | 0.04915 | 118 | 96 | 16 | 6 |
1456 | Yes, I am available after high tide. | 1.2373 | 0.04451 | 118 | 93 | 22 | 3 |
1457 | I’m only doing this until my writing career takes off. | 1.2373 | 0.04611 | 118 | 94 | 20 | 4 |
1458 | It's your call, shall we save it? | 1.2371 | 0.05029 | 97 | 77 | 17 | 3 |
1459 | My lance is quite effective against sand crabs, dogs looking for relief, and people focusing on their phones as they walk toward the castle. | 1.2371 | 0.04582 | 97 | 75 | 21 | 1 |
1460 | It’s a human potential method to develop yore values. | 1.2371 | 0.05029 | 97 | 77 | 17 | 3 |
1461 | This way I don't forget my visor. | 1.2371 | 0.05029 | 97 | 77 | 17 | 3 |
1462 | Guarding against sea level rise. You? | 1.2371 | 0.05439 | 97 | 79 | 13 | 5 |
1463 | Sink or swim? Challenge accepted! | 1.2371 | 0.05029 | 97 | 77 | 17 | 3 |
1464 | Hot out here, huh? | 1.2371 | 0.05439 | 97 | 79 | 13 | 5 |
1465 | It looks bigger when the tide comes in, I swear. | 1.2371 | 0.05439 | 97 | 79 | 13 | 5 |
1466 | Well, the map on my phone did say “here be dragons.” | 1.2371 | 0.04810 | 97 | 76 | 19 | 2 |
1467 | My guess is the lifeguard shortage has to do with the new swimsuit requirements. | 1.2371 | 0.05029 | 97 | 77 | 17 | 3 |
1468 | Sand grab” | 1.2371 | 0.05439 | 97 | 79 | 13 | 5 |
1469 | You have to wait 45 minutes after eating before committing to a siege | 1.2371 | 0.05238 | 97 | 78 | 15 | 4 |
1470 | This is for the swordfish. | 1.2368 | 0.05031 | 114 | 93 | 15 | 6 |
1471 | We need to attack before the tide comes in | 1.2368 | 0.05031 | 114 | 93 | 15 | 6 |
1472 | I may look invincible but what if I have to paddle out? | 1.2368 | 0.04545 | 114 | 90 | 21 | 3 |
1473 | They want us back in person full-time now, and I'm not taking any risks! | 1.2368 | 0.04712 | 114 | 91 | 19 | 4 |
1474 | I don't think you're fully trained in wrestling with moat dragons | 1.2368 | 0.04545 | 114 | 90 | 21 | 3 |
1475 | I'm just glad I didn't get assigned to an aquarium. | 1.2366 | 0.04687 | 93 | 72 | 20 | 1 |
1476 | I used to be the head lifeguard, but I’ve gotten a bit rusty. | 1.2366 | 0.04930 | 93 | 73 | 18 | 2 |
1477 | The life guard dress code stated “…dress accordingly “ | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
1478 | No sharks on my side. | 1.2364 | 0.04990 | 110 | 89 | 16 | 5 |
1479 | You if by land me if by sea. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
1480 | I don’t think the moat is wide enough to protect it. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
1481 | I thought this was supposed to be a knight watch. | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
1482 | Are you the one they call Hayley The Conqueror” | 1.2364 | 0.05314 | 110 | 91 | 12 | 7 |
1483 | Since you ask; a seahorse. | 1.2360 | 0.05305 | 89 | 71 | 15 | 3 |
1484 | I go through a lot of WD-40! | 1.2360 | 0.05767 | 89 | 73 | 11 | 5 |
1485 | I don't think you're taking this 'lifeguard' thing seriously enough! | 1.2360 | 0.05305 | 89 | 71 | 15 | 3 |
1486 | How many invaders did you whistle to death ? | 1.2358 | 0.04556 | 106 | 83 | 21 | 2 |
1487 | Some Air BnB ads are really misleading. | 1.2358 | 0.04556 | 106 | 83 | 21 | 2 |
1488 | ...and my great-great-great-great-grandfather also got out of his armour only once. | 1.2358 | 0.04935 | 106 | 85 | 17 | 4 |
1489 | For your information Brenda, it‘s a European bathing suit! | 1.2358 | 0.04630 | 123 | 99 | 19 | 5 |
1490 | The job post was saying “sandcastle guard” and I thought it referred to a game of thrones reboot… | 1.2358 | 0.04630 | 123 | 99 | 19 | 5 |
1491 | My home is where my castle is | 1.2358 | 0.04630 | 123 | 99 | 19 | 5 |
1492 | My kingdom for an ounce of sunscreen! | 1.2353 | 0.05198 | 85 | 67 | 16 | 2 |
1493 | I thought the ad said ‘Night Watchman.’ | 1.2353 | 0.04730 | 119 | 96 | 18 | 5 |
1494 | I’m the castle guard. | 1.2353 | 0.05246 | 102 | 83 | 14 | 5 |
1495 | Okay, so you won our first bet. But I bet you I can still swim in this thing! | 1.2353 | 0.04418 | 119 | 94 | 22 | 3 |
1496 | I just didn't feel like sunscreen was protective enough. | 1.2353 | 0.05428 | 102 | 84 | 12 | 6 |
1497 | I’m an intern for Disney’s Magic Kingdom. | 1.2353 | 0.04577 | 119 | 95 | 20 | 4 |
1498 | I'm guarding my moat | 1.2353 | 0.04730 | 119 | 96 | 18 | 5 |
1499 | Can you get my back? | 1.2353 | 0.05461 | 85 | 68 | 14 | 3 |
1500 | I voted for Ren Fair, but everyone else wanted the beach. | 1.2353 | 0.04658 | 102 | 80 | 20 | 2 |
1501 | Fine. I didn’t actually read ‘The Prince of Tides’ | 1.2353 | 0.04922 | 85 | 66 | 18 | 1 |
1502 | I preferred working remoatly. | 1.2353 | 0.04418 | 119 | 94 | 22 | 3 |
1503 | If I say it's a moat, it's a moat | 1.2348 | 0.04676 | 115 | 92 | 19 | 4 |
1504 | I'm prepared to defend our castle against the incoming tide of woe. | 1.2348 | 0.05142 | 115 | 95 | 13 | 7 |
1505 | Seven bedrooms, four ensuite. Three half baths. Library. Wine cellar. Not to mention a chapel. A ballroom. Salle à manger. A kitchen to die for. Of course a dungeon. And check out that top-of-the-line moat! What's not to like? | 1.2348 | 0.05142 | 115 | 95 | 13 | 7 |
1506 | Pity me not, for the Mall Santas have it harder. | 1.2348 | 0.04510 | 115 | 91 | 21 | 3 |
1507 | So there was this round table….. | 1.2348 | 0.04991 | 115 | 94 | 15 | 6 |
1508 | I descend from King Arthur- skin cancer runs in the family. | 1.2347 | 0.04983 | 98 | 78 | 17 | 3 |
1509 | When the leviathan arrives, you can remind me how much more practical your suit is, Milady. | 1.2347 | 0.04767 | 98 | 77 | 19 | 2 |
1510 | Here comes the first wave of enemies | 1.2347 | 0.04767 | 98 | 77 | 19 | 2 |
1511 | You take over while I visit the men's room. I may be a while. | 1.2347 | 0.05580 | 98 | 81 | 11 | 6 |
1512 | Are you in distress my fair maiden? | 1.2347 | 0.05389 | 98 | 80 | 13 | 5 |
1513 | Texas hired me. Apparently it’s not the guns, it’s the lack of moats. | 1.2347 | 0.05190 | 98 | 79 | 15 | 4 |
1514 | For want of a tide chart the kingdom was lost | 1.2347 | 0.05580 | 98 | 81 | 11 | 6 |
1515 | I'm roasting. | 1.2347 | 0.04983 | 98 | 78 | 17 | 3 |
1516 | You watch the swimmers, I've got your back if the Visigoths return. | 1.2346 | 0.05349 | 81 | 64 | 15 | 2 |
1517 | I find getting into character adds an element of authenticity that the judges really appreciate. | 1.2346 | 0.06400 | 81 | 68 | 7 | 6 |
1518 | Keep an eye on the kids in the water. I have high tide covered. | 1.2344 | 0.04503 | 128 | 103 | 20 | 5 |
1519 | I've been addicted to Dungeons and Dragons going on 10 years now. | 1.2342 | 0.04949 | 111 | 90 | 16 | 5 |
1520 | You seem distressed... | 1.2342 | 0.04781 | 111 | 89 | 18 | 4 |
1521 | I’ll focus on my job and you yours mam… | 1.2342 | 0.04781 | 111 | 89 | 18 | 4 |
1522 | I'm protecting the King. Would you like to tour the castle with me tonight. | 1.2342 | 0.05112 | 111 | 91 | 14 | 6 |
1523 | I'm only here in case a sea dragon shows up. | 1.2342 | 0.04607 | 111 | 88 | 20 | 3 |
1524 | No, I prefer cloudy days. | 1.2342 | 0.04236 | 111 | 86 | 24 | 1 |
1525 | Cover me while I take a leak? Don’t worry it’s been dead for hours. | 1.2342 | 0.04781 | 111 | 89 | 18 | 4 |
1526 | This moat is rather large. | 1.2342 | 0.04949 | 111 | 90 | 16 | 5 |
1527 | I specialize in damsels in distress. | 1.2340 | 0.05332 | 94 | 76 | 14 | 4 |
1528 | Did they make you buy your own uniform too? | 1.2336 | 0.04710 | 107 | 85 | 19 | 3 |
1529 | In what way are you prepared to storm the castle? | 1.2336 | 0.04893 | 107 | 86 | 17 | 4 |
1530 | My kingdom for a horsey! | 1.2336 | 0.04710 | 107 | 85 | 19 | 3 |
1531 | I'll cover the moat, you take the ocean. | 1.2336 | 0.05070 | 107 | 87 | 15 | 5 |
1532 | It took me hours to build. | 1.2336 | 0.04319 | 107 | 83 | 23 | 1 |
1533 | I was told it is threatened with climate change. | 1.2336 | 0.05241 | 107 | 88 | 13 | 6 |
1534 | What I save on sunscreen goes toward lubricants. | 1.2336 | 0.04710 | 107 | 85 | 19 | 3 |
1535 | “ I know it sounds a bit bizarre, but in Camelot that’s how conditions are!” | 1.2336 | 0.05241 | 107 | 88 | 13 | 6 |
1536 | I'm waiting for them to lower the drawbridge. | 1.2333 | 0.04543 | 120 | 96 | 20 | 4 |
1537 | The spear is only for run-away beach balls. | 1.2333 | 0.04841 | 120 | 98 | 16 | 6 |
1538 | Wait, someday you'll do anything your kids ask you to do. | 1.2333 | 0.05009 | 90 | 71 | 17 | 2 |
1539 | City Council declared we have to defend our oceanfront property from outsiders | 1.2333 | 0.06130 | 90 | 76 | 7 | 7 |
1540 | So you just use lotion for armor? | 1.2333 | 0.05009 | 90 | 71 | 17 | 2 |
1541 | Any dragons your direction? | 1.2333 | 0.05708 | 90 | 74 | 11 | 5 |
1542 | Yes, I'm single | 1.2333 | 0.04223 | 120 | 94 | 24 | 2 |
1543 | That's your job. I'm just the knight watchman. | 1.2333 | 0.04841 | 120 | 98 | 16 | 6 |
1544 | Could be rough siege today. | 1.2333 | 0.05253 | 90 | 72 | 15 | 3 |
1545 | Yes, I have used my lance a lot. | 1.2330 | 0.04407 | 103 | 80 | 22 | 1 |
1546 | When a five-year-old asks me to guard their castle, I take that responsibility seriously. | 1.2330 | 0.05014 | 103 | 83 | 16 | 4 |
1547 | The missus decided to downsize. | 1.2330 | 0.05200 | 103 | 84 | 14 | 5 |
1548 | Last time I was here I sat on a stingray. | 1.2330 | 0.04820 | 103 | 82 | 18 | 3 |
1549 | I'm nearly past the probation period. | 1.2330 | 0.05014 | 103 | 83 | 16 | 4 |
1550 | Nothing's really changed since the Middle Ages, except now I've got a real job. | 1.2330 | 0.04820 | 103 | 82 | 18 | 3 |
1551 | They call it SPF 10,000 | 1.2330 | 0.04820 | 103 | 82 | 18 | 3 |
1552 | SPF one thousand" | 1.2328 | 0.04640 | 116 | 93 | 19 | 4 |
1553 | I'm afraid your greatest enemy will ride in today at about 4:04 pm and vanquish your kingdom, so saith the tidal chart. | 1.2328 | 0.05525 | 116 | 99 | 7 | 10 |
1554 | This way I avoid sunburn. | 1.2326 | 0.05145 | 86 | 68 | 16 | 2 |
1555 | Maybe I followed the fantasy too far.. | 1.2326 | 0.05404 | 86 | 69 | 14 | 3 |
1556 | Fine, you can save them from drowning in the moat, but I still get to pour hot oil on them afterwards. | 1.2326 | 0.05145 | 86 | 68 | 16 | 2 |
1557 | Would you have a can-opener? | 1.2323 | 0.04501 | 99 | 77 | 21 | 1 |
1558 | I keep watch on the tides of war. | 1.2323 | 0.05142 | 99 | 80 | 15 | 4 |
1559 | It’s not much, but it’s an honest living. | 1.2323 | 0.04938 | 99 | 79 | 17 | 3 |
1560 | Every girl is bi. You just have to figure out if it's polar or sexual. | 1.2323 | 0.05142 | 99 | 80 | 15 | 4 |
1561 | Boring? Just wait until you've been here a thousand years. | 1.2323 | 0.04938 | 99 | 79 | 17 | 3 |
1562 | You can go. I've got the knight shift. | 1.2321 | 0.04743 | 112 | 90 | 18 | 4 |
1563 | It never fails to put me in a certain mood, you know what I mean? | 1.2321 | 0.05071 | 112 | 92 | 14 | 6 |
1564 | Let me know if you see a dragon. | 1.2321 | 0.05071 | 112 | 92 | 14 | 6 |
1565 | Can you cover for me? I forgot my floaties. | 1.2321 | 0.04570 | 112 | 89 | 20 | 3 |
1566 | Until the next wave, all this will be yours. | 1.2321 | 0.04390 | 112 | 88 | 22 | 2 |
1567 | You’re not worried about archers? | 1.2321 | 0.05227 | 112 | 93 | 12 | 7 |
1568 | I think we have different ideas on securing the moat | 1.2321 | 0.04743 | 112 | 90 | 18 | 4 |
1569 | It’s not Camelot, but everyone’s gotta start somewhere | 1.2320 | 0.04563 | 125 | 101 | 19 | 5 |
1570 | Ever play chess? | 1.2317 | 0.05569 | 82 | 66 | 13 | 3 |
1571 | Has it been hotter than usual this summer, or is it just me? | 1.2316 | 0.05065 | 95 | 76 | 16 | 3 |
1572 | I will defend my castle 'til the last grain of sand! | 1.2316 | 0.05065 | 95 | 76 | 16 | 3 |
1573 | The transition to the Tiny House lifestyle has really been easy. | 1.2316 | 0.04601 | 95 | 74 | 20 | 1 |
1574 | Just because I have battle experience doesn't mean I'm not afraid of skin cancer. | 1.2316 | 0.05281 | 95 | 77 | 14 | 4 |
1575 | They made it for me after I saved their kid. | 1.2316 | 0.05689 | 95 | 79 | 10 | 6 |
1576 | I'm part of the Weaponize Lifeguard Project! Mentally ill sun bathers are at the root of sand castle destruction not climate change induced ocean rise! | 1.2316 | 0.05281 | 95 | 77 | 14 | 4 |
1577 | It's really more of a transfer than a demotion. | 1.2316 | 0.04601 | 95 | 74 | 20 | 1 |
1578 | No tan lines. | 1.2315 | 0.04671 | 108 | 86 | 19 | 3 |
1579 | Time and tide wait for no man. | 1.2315 | 0.05028 | 108 | 88 | 15 | 5 |
1580 | I'll cover the moat. You cover the rest. | 1.2315 | 0.04853 | 108 | 87 | 17 | 4 |
1581 | That's quite a moat you got there. | 1.2315 | 0.04853 | 108 | 87 | 17 | 4 |
1582 | couldn't find my sunscreen... | 1.2315 | 0.04853 | 108 | 87 | 17 | 4 |
1583 | If you'd like to switch places, I'm wearing a Speedo under my armour. | 1.2315 | 0.04853 | 108 | 87 | 17 | 4 |
1584 | My kid built this castle. I must protect it at all costs! | 1.2315 | 0.05028 | 108 | 88 | 15 | 5 |
1585 | In today’s market, this was a steal. | 1.2315 | 0.04671 | 108 | 86 | 19 | 3 |
1586 | We decided to downsize now that the kids are gone. | 1.2314 | 0.04659 | 121 | 98 | 18 | 5 |
1587 | The king told me to defend the castle. So here I am. | 1.2313 | 0.04091 | 134 | 106 | 25 | 3 |
1588 | Thank God for global warming | 1.2313 | 0.04484 | 134 | 109 | 19 | 6 |
1589 | I'm sorry, did the Lilliputians take your clothes. | 1.2308 | 0.04970 | 104 | 84 | 16 | 4 |
1590 | Beautiful weather on the Rubicon. My armor has a high SPF rating. | 1.2308 | 0.04441 | 117 | 93 | 21 | 3 |
1591 | Okay, I was trying to stand out. Did it work?? | 1.2308 | 0.05431 | 91 | 74 | 13 | 4 |
1592 | My kingdom for a beach umbrella! | 1.2308 | 0.04441 | 117 | 93 | 21 | 3 |
1593 | Sure it’s hard to swim in, but the moat is only 3 inches deep. | 1.2308 | 0.05451 | 78 | 62 | 14 | 2 |
1594 | I know it looks a bit extreme. But have you ever seen the size of the sharks that often show up only ten feet from the shore? | 1.2308 | 0.04779 | 104 | 83 | 18 | 3 |
1595 | Renaissance Faires just seem so...permanent. | 1.2308 | 0.04579 | 104 | 82 | 20 | 2 |
1596 | I'm wishing I were in Scotland fishing tonight. | 1.2308 | 0.04761 | 117 | 95 | 17 | 5 |
1597 | If it falls into the sea, we're in this together, right? | 1.2308 | 0.04579 | 104 | 82 | 20 | 2 |
1598 | Yes, I realize it has a moat! | 1.2308 | 0.04970 | 104 | 84 | 16 | 4 |
1599 | On second thought, maybe the lance is a bit too much. | 1.2308 | 0.04779 | 104 | 83 | 18 | 3 |
1600 | I hear there might be a serf uprising. | 1.2308 | 0.05651 | 91 | 75 | 11 | 5 |
1601 | I wish I were doing something more important with my life. | 1.2308 | 0.05061 | 117 | 97 | 13 | 7 |
1602 | Good thing there's two of us -- I only rescue people in crowns. | 1.2302 | 0.04530 | 126 | 102 | 19 | 5 |
1603 | Oh so you’re the knight shift | 1.2302 | 0.04668 | 126 | 103 | 17 | 6 |
1604 | We all start somewhere. | 1.2301 | 0.04534 | 113 | 90 | 20 | 3 |
1605 | This reality TV thing is getting old… | 1.2301 | 0.04705 | 113 | 91 | 18 | 4 |
1606 | They surrender at high tide. Have the pails ready. | 1.2301 | 0.04705 | 113 | 91 | 18 | 4 |
1607 | I'm not dressed for the beach, am I? | 1.2301 | 0.04705 | 113 | 91 | 18 | 4 |
1608 | I have severe heat stroke. | 1.2301 | 0.05030 | 113 | 93 | 14 | 6 |
1609 | It’s only until they get the drawbridge replaced. | 1.2301 | 0.04171 | 113 | 88 | 24 | 1 |
1610 | Do you have any lotion? | 1.2301 | 0.04705 | 113 | 91 | 18 | 4 |
1611 | Downsizing. | 1.2300 | 0.04894 | 100 | 80 | 17 | 3 |
1612 | Will you let me know if a foreign fleet approaches? I'm going to get us lattes. | 1.2300 | 0.05096 | 100 | 81 | 15 | 4 |
1613 | One of those destination wedding things I think | 1.2300 | 0.05096 | 100 | 81 | 15 | 4 |
1614 | I can also do a slow-motion run on the beach but it’s much louder. | 1.2300 | 0.05096 | 100 | 81 | 15 | 4 |
1615 | Brace yourself, high-tide is a bloodbath | 1.2300 | 0.05096 | 100 | 81 | 15 | 4 |
1616 | When I need to pee, I just go in the sea | 1.2300 | 0.05096 | 100 | 81 | 15 | 4 |
1617 | Technically, it's called a rook. | 1.2299 | 0.05092 | 87 | 69 | 16 | 2 |
1618 | Yeah, the moat is kind of pointless. | 1.2299 | 0.05348 | 87 | 70 | 14 | 3 |
1619 | Oh, so your floatation device scares the ocean? | 1.2299 | 0.05348 | 87 | 70 | 14 | 3 |
1620 | Will you at least be free after the tide comes in? | 1.2299 | 0.05348 | 87 | 70 | 14 | 3 |
1621 | After the tide comes in I can go home. | 1.2296 | 0.04454 | 135 | 110 | 19 | 6 |
1622 | My home, my castle - buzz off! | 1.2295 | 0.04909 | 122 | 101 | 14 | 7 |
1623 | I got a Rustoleum booster. | 1.2295 | 0.04909 | 122 | 101 | 14 | 7 |
1624 | I’m weighed down with responsibilities; the swimmers are on you! | 1.2294 | 0.04633 | 109 | 87 | 19 | 3 |
1625 | I’m certified for land rescues only.” | 1.2294 | 0.04446 | 109 | 86 | 21 | 2 |
1626 | We called it CAMELOT. | 1.2294 | 0.04813 | 109 | 88 | 17 | 4 |
1627 | My left flank is exposed. | 1.2294 | 0.05473 | 109 | 92 | 9 | 8 |
1628 | My shift is over when the castle washes out to sea. | 1.2294 | 0.04986 | 109 | 89 | 15 | 5 |
1629 | You guard what you guard and I'll guard what I guard | 1.2294 | 0.05154 | 109 | 90 | 13 | 6 |
1630 | May I move Knight to Queen? | 1.2294 | 0.04633 | 109 | 87 | 19 | 3 |
1631 | Thy tide, she is a relentless beast. | 1.2292 | 0.05231 | 96 | 78 | 14 | 4 |
1632 | Sunscreen hasn’t been invented yet | 1.2292 | 0.05231 | 96 | 78 | 14 | 4 |
1633 | I'm protecting the castle from sand-crabs. | 1.2292 | 0.05231 | 96 | 78 | 14 | 4 |
1634 | A fiefdom none the less. | 1.2290 | 0.04542 | 131 | 107 | 18 | 6 |
1635 | It’s the new anti shark repellent | 1.2289 | 0.05508 | 83 | 67 | 13 | 3 |
1636 | The little people have offered me an island. | 1.2289 | 0.05235 | 83 | 66 | 15 | 2 |
1637 | Thanks for coming---I don't do moats. | 1.2289 | 0.05769 | 83 | 68 | 11 | 4 |
1638 | Once the water reaches the moat, I'll leap to the rescue. | 1.2288 | 0.04725 | 118 | 96 | 17 | 5 |
1639 | Well, at least I don't need sunscreen... | 1.2288 | 0.04569 | 118 | 95 | 19 | 4 |
1640 | What is this 'Casual Friday' you speak of? | 1.2286 | 0.05110 | 105 | 86 | 14 | 5 |
1641 | You free after high tide? | 1.2286 | 0.04928 | 105 | 85 | 16 | 4 |
1642 | It was either this or the sunblock. | 1.2286 | 0.04738 | 105 | 84 | 18 | 3 |
1643 | I somehow heard rook for a castle | 1.2286 | 0.04541 | 105 | 83 | 20 | 2 |
1644 | I promised my kids I’d protect their sand castle. | 1.2286 | 0.04928 | 105 | 85 | 16 | 4 |
1645 | I get off when the tide comes in! | 1.2286 | 0.04738 | 105 | 84 | 18 | 3 |
1646 | Our kingdom is far too small. | 1.2283 | 0.05377 | 92 | 75 | 13 | 4 |
1647 | If you think sunburn is an occupational hazard, you should try rust. | 1.2281 | 0.05143 | 114 | 95 | 12 | 7 |
1648 | I’m aware that my fiefdom is tiny, but it is all I got!” | 1.2281 | 0.04831 | 114 | 93 | 16 | 5 |
1649 | Are you waiting for knight fall? | 1.2277 | 0.04850 | 101 | 81 | 17 | 3 |
1650 | will it sand the test of time? | 1.2277 | 0.04423 | 101 | 79 | 21 | 1 |
1651 | Do you have my oilcan ready in case I have to cross the moat? | 1.2277 | 0.05050 | 101 | 82 | 15 | 4 |
1652 | It’s only sand” is a cop out and frankly insulting. | 1.2277 | 0.04642 | 101 | 80 | 19 | 2 |
1653 | The moat’s dry. We won’t be needing you. | 1.2277 | 0.05050 | 101 | 82 | 15 | 4 |
1654 | see how the moat protects the castle? | 1.2276 | 0.04591 | 123 | 100 | 18 | 5 |
1655 | Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think you are dressed properly for a workplace. | 1.2276 | 0.04291 | 123 | 98 | 22 | 3 |
1656 | You wouldn't believe what we paid in this market. | 1.2273 | 0.04945 | 110 | 90 | 15 | 5 |
1657 | I'm a redhead. | 1.2273 | 0.06203 | 88 | 75 | 6 | 7 |
1658 | I won’t tell you how to do your job but if they make it across the moat they’re mine. | 1.2273 | 0.04945 | 110 | 90 | 15 | 5 |
1659 | My shift ends in 10 minutes. Text me if anyone storms the castle. | 1.2273 | 0.04945 | 110 | 90 | 15 | 5 |
1660 | Sure it's heavy, but I'm protected from the sun AND barbarian hordes. | 1.2273 | 0.05294 | 88 | 71 | 14 | 3 |
1661 | I’m allergic to sand. | 1.2273 | 0.04945 | 110 | 90 | 15 | 5 |
1662 | One of us is living in the wrong century.. | 1.2273 | 0.04595 | 110 | 88 | 19 | 3 |
1663 | So they can charge more. Now it’s a Theme Park! | 1.2273 | 0.05766 | 88 | 73 | 10 | 5 |
1664 | I normally work the knight shift | 1.2273 | 0.05041 | 88 | 70 | 16 | 2 |
1665 | Yeah, it’s kinda hot, but the SPF is like a thousand. | 1.2273 | 0.05041 | 88 | 70 | 16 | 2 |
1666 | My kids insisted. | 1.2273 | 0.05766 | 88 | 73 | 10 | 5 |
1667 | Chivalry is dead if it's anything beyond waist-deep. | 1.2273 | 0.05111 | 110 | 91 | 13 | 6 |
1668 | You're saying King Tide is not a person? | 1.2273 | 0.05535 | 88 | 72 | 12 | 4 |
1669 | This suit has an SPF of 10,000. | 1.2268 | 0.04971 | 97 | 78 | 16 | 3 |
1670 | You have your sun protection, I have mine. | 1.2268 | 0.04518 | 97 | 76 | 20 | 1 |
1671 | Woe betide, fair maiden, ere this watch endeth. | 1.2268 | 0.05182 | 97 | 79 | 14 | 4 |
1672 | Of course I know that the castle will be washed away. That's when I get to fight the dragon inside. | 1.2268 | 0.04971 | 97 | 78 | 16 | 3 |
1673 | Hey, don't ask me. It was King Arthur's idea. | 1.2264 | 0.05066 | 106 | 87 | 14 | 5 |
1674 | You don't see any dragons do you? | 1.2264 | 0.04503 | 106 | 84 | 20 | 2 |
1675 | The trust fund kid pays me 50$ to guard his castle. | 1.2264 | 0.04886 | 106 | 86 | 16 | 4 |
1676 | 'Tis the Tides of March. | 1.2264 | 0.04886 | 106 | 86 | 16 | 4 |
1677 | Zillow says I should expect at least three 'all-cash' offers before the tide turns. | 1.2262 | 0.05449 | 84 | 68 | 13 | 3 |
1678 | Just wait! My time will come! | 1.2261 | 0.04464 | 115 | 92 | 20 | 3 |
1679 | So what did you do on your shift? | 1.2261 | 0.04631 | 115 | 93 | 18 | 4 |
1680 | I got de-'moat'-ed. | 1.2261 | 0.04793 | 115 | 94 | 16 | 5 |
1681 | Actually, I’m a knight who says neap. | 1.2261 | 0.05102 | 115 | 96 | 12 | 7 |
1682 | Last week I defended it against a band of five year olds". Heidi Roe, Myrtle Point, Or | 1.2258 | 0.04411 | 124 | 100 | 20 | 4 |
1683 | I'm waiting for the mail ship. You? | 1.2258 | 0.04411 | 124 | 100 | 20 | 4 |
1684 | I didn't feel like the moat was enough protection. | 1.2258 | 0.05100 | 93 | 75 | 15 | 3 |
1685 | I think a division of labour is called for. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
1686 | I came, I saw, I waited one hour after eating. | 1.2255 | 0.05380 | 102 | 85 | 11 | 6 |
1687 | YOU save that drowning toddler; I’m guarding the castle. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
1688 | I'm from Connecticut, via Camelot, how about you? | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
1689 | I just got tired of constantly re-applying sunscreen. | 1.2252 | 0.04558 | 111 | 89 | 19 | 3 |
1690 | Are you the damsel who saves those in distress? | 1.2252 | 0.04735 | 111 | 90 | 17 | 4 |
1691 | My name is Fred. But people call me Ozymandias. | 1.2252 | 0.04904 | 111 | 91 | 15 | 5 |
1692 | I am here, M’Lady until the tide. | 1.2252 | 0.04558 | 111 | 89 | 19 | 3 |
1693 | I can’t help it, I’m an originalist. | 1.2252 | 0.04904 | 111 | 91 | 15 | 5 |
1694 | ‘Tis quite the moat! | 1.2252 | 0.04735 | 111 | 90 | 17 | 4 |
1695 | This would be great, if pigs weren't excellent swimmers. | 1.2250 | 0.04654 | 120 | 98 | 17 | 5 |
1696 | It beats guarding one in the air. | 1.2250 | 0.05618 | 80 | 65 | 12 | 3 |
1697 | So what did you do to get transferred to Lilliput? | 1.2250 | 0.04654 | 120 | 98 | 17 | 5 |
1698 | Eventually this will lead to full-time work at the Renaissance Faires. | 1.2247 | 0.04990 | 89 | 71 | 16 | 2 |
1699 | So what? You're a lifeguard; I'm a knight-guard. | 1.2247 | 0.04990 | 89 | 71 | 16 | 2 |
1700 | Yes, it does slow my response time down, but it's great against shark attacks! | 1.2247 | 0.05478 | 89 | 73 | 12 | 4 |
1701 | Castles in the sand! Well sand is all we have | 1.2246 | 0.04366 | 138 | 113 | 19 | 6 |
1702 | Try laying siege to it and see what happens. | 1.2245 | 0.04925 | 98 | 79 | 16 | 3 |
1703 | this is in SEINE! | 1.2245 | 0.05335 | 98 | 81 | 12 | 5 |
1704 | I just walk out to them. | 1.2245 | 0.05529 | 98 | 82 | 10 | 6 |
1705 | You guard your thing and I’ll guard mine. | 1.2245 | 0.05135 | 98 | 80 | 14 | 4 |
1706 | Just so you know, we are on the same side. | 1.2245 | 0.04925 | 98 | 79 | 16 | 3 |
1707 | Hightide doth taketh. | 1.2245 | 0.04925 | 98 | 79 | 16 | 3 |
1708 | The builder is not just some five year old, he is my king. | 1.2245 | 0.04925 | 98 | 79 | 16 | 3 |
1709 | I get off at low tide. | 1.2245 | 0.04707 | 98 | 78 | 18 | 2 |
1710 | You know what they say, dress for the job." | 1.2243 | 0.04659 | 107 | 86 | 18 | 3 |
1711 | Yeah, you do the drowning kids, I do the tiny, sandy damsels. | 1.2243 | 0.04466 | 107 | 85 | 20 | 2 |
1712 | This job is beneath me. | 1.2243 | 0.05196 | 107 | 89 | 12 | 6 |
1713 | If I can’t be the best, I sure as hell can be the worst!” | 1.2243 | 0.05023 | 107 | 88 | 14 | 5 |
1714 | Didn’t you hear? Summer is coming | 1.2243 | 0.04844 | 107 | 87 | 16 | 4 |
1715 | Someone has to guard this castle. | 1.2241 | 0.04911 | 116 | 96 | 14 | 6 |
1716 | Will you save me if I fall into the moat? | 1.2241 | 0.04756 | 116 | 95 | 16 | 5 |
1717 | It's more of a sun boil. | 1.2241 | 0.04756 | 116 | 95 | 16 | 5 |
1718 | And then Caesar looks at the cannibal and says “I’m glad-he-ate-her.” Get it? | 1.2235 | 0.05645 | 85 | 70 | 11 | 4 |
1719 | It's seasonal work, really. From December to January I guard the Gingerbread House at the bakery. | 1.2235 | 0.05125 | 85 | 68 | 15 | 2 |
1720 | How about, if they come by land, I'll fight them, if by sea you fight them? | 1.2235 | 0.04546 | 85 | 66 | 19 | 0 |
1721 | We're reenacting the siege of Troy...I'm just waiting for the horse to show up. | 1.2234 | 0.05273 | 94 | 77 | 13 | 4 |
1722 | No, no it's a summertime gig for me too" | 1.2234 | 0.04820 | 94 | 75 | 17 | 2 |
1723 | You can tell a lot about a Knight, by the size of the castle he protects. | 1.2234 | 0.05273 | 94 | 77 | 13 | 4 |
1724 | We know the attack will come from the sea. | 1.2234 | 0.05486 | 94 | 78 | 11 | 5 |
1725 | I’m only on duty twice a day. | 1.2234 | 0.04576 | 94 | 74 | 19 | 1 |
1726 | The moat is deeper than it looks. | 1.2234 | 0.04820 | 94 | 75 | 17 | 2 |
1727 | You do your job, and I'll do mine | 1.2234 | 0.04820 | 94 | 75 | 17 | 2 |
1728 | My only job here is to make sure that nobody stomps on the castle. | 1.2234 | 0.05273 | 94 | 77 | 13 | 4 |
1729 | I got this one. | 1.2234 | 0.05691 | 94 | 79 | 9 | 6 |
1730 | So what if we’ve downsized. I’m still the Castle Guard. | 1.2234 | 0.04576 | 94 | 74 | 19 | 1 |
1731 | Perchance, is your name Guinevere? | 1.2233 | 0.04962 | 103 | 84 | 15 | 4 |
1732 | It's a Lilliputian job, but somebody has to it. | 1.2233 | 0.04962 | 103 | 84 | 15 | 4 |
1733 | The job description didn’t mention sand. | 1.2233 | 0.04562 | 103 | 82 | 19 | 2 |
1734 | It's Sir Fing to you. | 1.2233 | 0.04962 | 103 | 84 | 15 | 4 |
1735 | Still "No" huh? If I told you I have a castle, would you go out with me then? | 1.2233 | 0.04962 | 103 | 84 | 15 | 4 |
1736 | You didn't get the memo? | 1.2233 | 0.04766 | 103 | 83 | 17 | 3 |
1737 | Have you seen a holy grail around here by any chance? | 1.2233 | 0.05332 | 103 | 86 | 11 | 6 |
1738 | So’s who’s your agent? | 1.2233 | 0.04348 | 103 | 81 | 21 | 1 |
1739 | The tide’s been winning. For honor I’ll never stop trying. | 1.2233 | 0.04962 | 103 | 84 | 15 | 4 |
1740 | They weren't confident the moat would be enough. | 1.2232 | 0.04522 | 112 | 90 | 19 | 3 |
1741 | I love spear fishing, but my dermatologist insists ... | 1.2231 | 0.04467 | 121 | 98 | 19 | 4 |
1742 | They waived the 100 yard timed swim. | 1.2231 | 0.04467 | 121 | 98 | 19 | 4 |
1743 | If you see the dragon, I'd skip the CPR." | 1.2222 | 0.04543 | 135 | 112 | 16 | 7 |
1744 | My liege is in Time-Out. | 1.2222 | 0.05556 | 81 | 66 | 12 | 3 |
1745 | Yeah, I'm a helicopter parent, and so what? | 1.2222 | 0.04881 | 99 | 80 | 16 | 3 |
1746 | So I was putting on one of those underarmor shirts and I thought to myself, 'hey wait a minute...' | 1.2222 | 0.05087 | 99 | 81 | 14 | 4 |
1747 | Really? The ad said moat, castle, "knight hours." No matter what HR told you, our job is to make sure that everyone in the water drowns. | 1.2222 | 0.04719 | 117 | 96 | 16 | 5 |
1748 | Well at least you don’t have to guard all knight long! | 1.2222 | 0.05648 | 90 | 75 | 10 | 5 |
1749 | It's made of stainless steel. I'm not worried about rust. | 1.2222 | 0.04665 | 99 | 79 | 18 | 2 |
1750 | Sure, I’m from the Middle Ages, but that doesn’t mean I’m middle aged! | 1.2222 | 0.04881 | 99 | 80 | 16 | 3 |
1751 | Instead of sun block, I use Rustoleum. | 1.2222 | 0.05827 | 81 | 67 | 10 | 4 |
1752 | Ok. You handle the drowners and I’ll tackle the dragons. | 1.2222 | 0.04881 | 99 | 80 | 16 | 3 |
1753 | I bet you think I'm crazy, huh? | 1.2222 | 0.05827 | 81 | 67 | 10 | 4 |
1754 | I like our chances. | 1.2222 | 0.04804 | 108 | 88 | 16 | 4 |
1755 | To become a full-fledged Spartan I have to have at least one castle defense on my resume. | 1.2222 | 0.04396 | 117 | 94 | 20 | 3 |
1756 | You watch the floats. I’ve got the moats. | 1.2222 | 0.04560 | 117 | 95 | 18 | 4 |
1757 | Fair maiden, you merely guard this beach. I must guard an entire kingdom! | 1.2222 | 0.04804 | 108 | 88 | 16 | 4 |
1758 | I'm protesting the implicit violence of sand castle architecture. | 1.2222 | 0.05648 | 90 | 75 | 10 | 5 |
1759 | Who do I think I am? I'm the knight in shining armor! | 1.2222 | 0.04682 | 90 | 71 | 18 | 1 |
1760 | I can’t help myself; I always end up taking my work with me on vacation. | 1.2222 | 0.05663 | 99 | 84 | 8 | 7 |
1761 | I've been privatized. | 1.2222 | 0.04941 | 90 | 72 | 16 | 2 |
1762 | Hey, I don't make fun of you trying to save people from drowning. | 1.2222 | 0.05087 | 99 | 81 | 14 | 4 |
1763 | Bruh, it's hot as fuck in this thing | 1.2222 | 0.04881 | 99 | 80 | 16 | 3 |
1764 | Yeah, no, I don’t emoat. | 1.2222 | 0.05286 | 99 | 82 | 12 | 5 |
1765 | It’s hot, but I save a lot of money on sunscreen. | 1.2222 | 0.04881 | 99 | 80 | 16 | 3 |
1766 | what are you looking at? | 1.2213 | 0.04584 | 122 | 100 | 17 | 5 |
1767 | At least your job is seasonal, mine's tidal. | 1.2212 | 0.04659 | 113 | 92 | 17 | 4 |
1768 | What time are we storming the castle? | 1.2212 | 0.04825 | 113 | 93 | 15 | 5 |
1769 | I imagined a job at a lookout post in Fort Myers somewhat differently. | 1.2212 | 0.04986 | 113 | 94 | 13 | 6 |
1770 | I wasn't expecting to have to defend the castle against the rising ocean levels | 1.2212 | 0.04486 | 113 | 91 | 19 | 3 |
1771 | What? Do you think it's easy holding back the tide in this get-up? | 1.2212 | 0.04725 | 104 | 84 | 17 | 3 |
1772 | I'm thinking of giving this all up and becoming a cartoonist....but I can't decide: so far it's a draw. | 1.2212 | 0.04725 | 104 | 84 | 17 | 3 |
1773 | You watch over your own realm, I’ll watch over mine. | 1.2212 | 0.05105 | 104 | 86 | 13 | 5 |
1774 | Look, this is what I do. Seven months, maybe eight. | 1.2212 | 0.04523 | 104 | 83 | 19 | 2 |
1775 | I thought I warned you not to touch the "re-moat!" | 1.2212 | 0.05105 | 104 | 86 | 13 | 5 |
1776 | Be careful. There are sharks in the moat. | 1.2212 | 0.04725 | 104 | 84 | 17 | 3 |
1777 | Baywatch? I thought you said knightswatch… | 1.2212 | 0.04312 | 104 | 82 | 21 | 1 |
1778 | Do sharks bite? | 1.2211 | 0.05223 | 95 | 78 | 13 | 4 |
1779 | Social distancing? What is that? | 1.2211 | 0.05433 | 95 | 79 | 11 | 5 |
1780 | We're all guarding someething. | 1.2211 | 0.04534 | 95 | 75 | 19 | 1 |
1781 | The map said here be dragons. | 1.2211 | 0.05433 | 95 | 79 | 11 | 5 |
1782 | You talkin' to me? | 1.2211 | 0.05433 | 95 | 79 | 11 | 5 |
1783 | Today, Sancho. I stay at my castle. Tomorrow, I go out there and attack those wind turbines. | 1.2211 | 0.05223 | 95 | 78 | 13 | 4 |
1784 | I am sworn to guard it with my life. I do wish we'd built on higher ground. | 1.2211 | 0.05004 | 95 | 77 | 15 | 3 |
1785 | I came for the day, now I’m here for the knight | 1.2211 | 0.05004 | 95 | 77 | 15 | 3 |
1786 | It's called sunscreen | 1.2211 | 0.04775 | 95 | 76 | 17 | 2 |
1787 | The minute there’s an opening at the Round Table, I’m outta here! | 1.2211 | 0.04534 | 95 | 75 | 19 | 1 |
1788 | How could waves and tides are worse than Sea Serpents?" | 1.2211 | 0.05223 | 95 | 78 | 13 | 4 |
1789 | Look. I got the armor, I’m gonna wear it. | 1.2211 | 0.05635 | 95 | 80 | 9 | 6 |
1790 | Some things never change. | 1.2209 | 0.05335 | 86 | 70 | 13 | 3 |
1791 | I told Siri to search knight guard jobs. | 1.2209 | 0.05585 | 86 | 71 | 11 | 4 |
1792 | I defy you to cross that moat! | 1.2209 | 0.05072 | 86 | 69 | 15 | 2 |
1793 | Could you hold the fort while I take a leak? | 1.2209 | 0.05585 | 86 | 71 | 11 | 4 |
1794 | Don't worry! The mote will hold. | 1.2209 | 0.05072 | 86 | 69 | 15 | 2 |
1795 | This is what I do on the days the beach is closed. Why are you here? | 1.2209 | 0.05335 | 86 | 70 | 13 | 3 |
1796 | Can you handle any problems? My armor is rusted solid from the last time I stepped in water! | 1.2205 | 0.04017 | 127 | 101 | 24 | 2 |
1797 | Let me know if you spot a big fish. | 1.2203 | 0.04362 | 118 | 95 | 20 | 3 |
1798 | The job description said 'changing of the guard'... | 1.2202 | 0.04582 | 109 | 88 | 18 | 3 |
1799 | Her Royal Highness hath decreed I am to defend the ramparts unto my last breath, or until Sesame Street is over. | 1.2202 | 0.04939 | 109 | 90 | 14 | 5 |
1800 | Moat drownings are on the rise. | 1.2202 | 0.04764 | 109 | 89 | 16 | 4 |
1801 | Congrats! I see Timmy hired you too. I got the Knight Watch and it looks like you got the Bay Watch. | 1.2202 | 0.04939 | 109 | 90 | 14 | 5 |
1802 | Dear lady, I’ve slayed dragons a mere high tide shall be nothing. | 1.2200 | 0.04623 | 100 | 80 | 18 | 2 |
1803 | Winter is coming! | 1.2200 | 0.04399 | 100 | 79 | 20 | 1 |
1804 | I agree. True chivalry is a beach | 1.2200 | 0.04399 | 100 | 79 | 20 | 1 |
1805 | I 've been demoted. What is your story? | 1.2200 | 0.04837 | 100 | 81 | 16 | 3 |
1806 | I'm in training for a job in security at White Castle. | 1.2200 | 0.04399 | 100 | 79 | 20 | 1 |
1807 | You must be wondering why I am carrying what looks like a spear or a large arrow rather than a jousting lance? | 1.2200 | 0.05041 | 100 | 82 | 14 | 4 |
1808 | I'm the God of War. What are you the Goddess of? | 1.2200 | 0.04837 | 100 | 81 | 16 | 3 |
1809 | What do you mean 'toxic masculinity'? | 1.2200 | 0.04837 | 100 | 81 | 16 | 3 |
1810 | What is this SPF protection system you speak of? | 1.2200 | 0.05041 | 100 | 82 | 14 | 4 |
1811 | Fie upon this 'high tide' you speak of. | 1.2200 | 0.05041 | 100 | 82 | 14 | 4 |
1812 | It's been such a nice change since those offshore windmills appeared | 1.2200 | 0.04623 | 100 | 80 | 18 | 2 |
1813 | We are awaiting seige from King Timmy. | 1.2200 | 0.04837 | 100 | 81 | 16 | 3 |
1814 | Lindsey Graham said I had to protect Trump Towers at all costs. | 1.2198 | 0.05591 | 91 | 76 | 10 | 5 |
1815 | Have you seen a very large wooden horse? I had to leave for awhile as my joints needed oiling. | 1.2198 | 0.04893 | 91 | 73 | 16 | 2 |
1816 | You bully me. You laugh at me. But I passed the same certification course as you and we’ll see who the people come running to when a the Norsemen breach our shores. | 1.2198 | 0.05369 | 91 | 75 | 12 | 4 |
1817 | ‘Tis Shark Week. | 1.2198 | 0.04893 | 91 | 73 | 16 | 2 |
1818 | I will relax when the water fills the moat! | 1.2198 | 0.04365 | 91 | 71 | 20 | 0 |
1819 | Love jousting with narwhals. | 1.2195 | 0.05213 | 82 | 66 | 14 | 2 |
1820 | I burn easily. | 1.2195 | 0.05494 | 82 | 67 | 12 | 3 |
1821 | You and your HGTV! | 1.2195 | 0.04402 | 123 | 100 | 19 | 4 |
1822 | When do we cross the Rubicon? | 1.2195 | 0.04551 | 123 | 101 | 17 | 5 |
1823 | We are testing a new moat design. | 1.2193 | 0.04946 | 114 | 95 | 13 | 6 |
1824 | Excuse me, why aren't you in uniform? | 1.2192 | 0.06542 | 73 | 62 | 6 | 5 |
1825 | If we're breached, I'm ready! | 1.2190 | 0.04684 | 105 | 85 | 17 | 3 |
1826 | I’m the new knight guard. | 1.2190 | 0.04876 | 105 | 86 | 15 | 4 |
1827 | Can you help save my kingdom before the tide comes in? | 1.2190 | 0.05060 | 105 | 87 | 13 | 5 |
1828 | What's your definition of in distress? | 1.2190 | 0.04684 | 105 | 85 | 17 | 3 |
1829 | I assure you this ‘High Tide’ has never met my spear! | 1.2190 | 0.04684 | 105 | 85 | 17 | 3 |
1830 | Watch out for the high tide! | 1.2190 | 0.04485 | 105 | 84 | 19 | 2 |
1831 | Why go through the hassle of resuscitating someone, when it is so much easier just to stab them? | 1.2188 | 0.04730 | 96 | 77 | 17 | 2 |
1832 | But I’m saving civilisation! | 1.2188 | 0.05581 | 96 | 81 | 9 | 6 |
1833 | I find it's better than sunblock. | 1.2188 | 0.04730 | 96 | 77 | 17 | 2 |
1834 | The joust begins at low tide! | 1.2188 | 0.04957 | 96 | 78 | 15 | 3 |
1835 | Shoulda read the fine print before giving that guy my horse. | 1.2188 | 0.04957 | 96 | 78 | 15 | 3 |
1836 | I thought her majesty said it was a moot point | 1.2188 | 0.04957 | 96 | 78 | 15 | 3 |
1837 | Could I trouble you to oil my back? | 1.2188 | 0.05581 | 96 | 81 | 9 | 6 |
1838 | I’m off at high tide, want to meet me at the pub for a flagon of mead | 1.2188 | 0.04730 | 96 | 77 | 17 | 2 |
1839 | Boss said no more knight swimming | 1.2188 | 0.04957 | 96 | 78 | 15 | 3 |
1840 | Sunscreen? No; but thanks for the offer | 1.2185 | 0.04329 | 119 | 96 | 20 | 3 |
1841 | You keep an eye out for sharks, while I watch for the dragon floaties. | 1.2184 | 0.05279 | 87 | 71 | 13 | 3 |
1842 | I’m sorry, I’m not carrying any suntan lotion | 1.2184 | 0.05019 | 87 | 70 | 15 | 2 |
1843 | With climate change, these beachfront properties are more precarious than ever. | 1.2184 | 0.04455 | 87 | 68 | 19 | 0 |
1844 | I worked remote the past 500 years. | 1.2184 | 0.05279 | 87 | 71 | 13 | 3 |
1845 | I'm more of a flam-buoyancy kinda guy. | 1.2182 | 0.04725 | 110 | 90 | 16 | 4 |
1846 | They said I didn't have to do the CPR classes. | 1.2182 | 0.04545 | 110 | 89 | 18 | 3 |
1847 | The ad said “Love the beach? Become a Sandcastle guard.” Aside from the outfit, it’s a pretty sweet gig. | 1.2182 | 0.04545 | 110 | 89 | 18 | 3 |
1848 | Defending the castle from foreign invaders isn't what it used to be. | 1.2182 | 0.04898 | 110 | 91 | 14 | 5 |
1849 | I told the placement agent I was ready for work outside my room,out of sweatpants,and off a screen. | 1.2182 | 0.04725 | 110 | 90 | 16 | 4 |
1850 | I said EMPIRE, not UMPIRE | 1.2182 | 0.05385 | 110 | 94 | 8 | 8 |
1851 | Just stay in your jurisdiction | 1.2182 | 0.04725 | 110 | 90 | 16 | 4 |
1852 | Ok will accept your offer, Knight takes castle…. | 1.2179 | 0.05366 | 78 | 63 | 13 | 2 |
1853 | Veni, vidi, Baby! | 1.2179 | 0.05668 | 78 | 64 | 11 | 3 |
1854 | It’s been years since I’ve done this. I’m a little rusty. | 1.2178 | 0.04794 | 101 | 82 | 16 | 3 |
1855 | The moat isn't in your jurisdiction, right? | 1.2178 | 0.04582 | 101 | 81 | 18 | 2 |
1856 | I should have asked more questions before I accepted the knight shift. | 1.2178 | 0.04996 | 101 | 83 | 14 | 4 |
1857 | It only took one knight to build this castle. | 1.2178 | 0.04794 | 101 | 82 | 16 | 3 |
1858 | Snow... Jon Snow. | 1.2178 | 0.04996 | 101 | 83 | 14 | 4 |
1859 | Would you stand guard for a few minutes while I go for a swim. | 1.2178 | 0.04996 | 101 | 83 | 14 | 4 |
1860 | What I've saved in sunscreen I've had to spend on oil to keep the joints moving | 1.2177 | 0.04517 | 124 | 102 | 17 | 5 |
1861 | NEVER. HAVE YOU | 1.2177 | 0.04370 | 124 | 101 | 19 | 4 |
1862 | tu casa mi casa | 1.2174 | 0.04416 | 115 | 93 | 19 | 3 |
1863 | Hard to imagine the Prince swimming later, and even harder to imagine a dragon showing up | 1.2174 | 0.04845 | 92 | 74 | 16 | 2 |
1864 | You work your side of the stream and I'll work mine... | 1.2174 | 0.04749 | 115 | 95 | 15 | 5 |
1865 | Like the moat? | 1.2174 | 0.04585 | 115 | 94 | 17 | 4 |
1866 | Don't mind me--I'm just guarding the castle. | 1.2174 | 0.05315 | 92 | 76 | 12 | 4 |
1867 | If you'll do swimmer rescues, I'll handle dragon attacks. | 1.2174 | 0.04324 | 92 | 72 | 20 | 0 |
1868 | It also makes an effective sunblock! | 1.2174 | 0.04240 | 115 | 92 | 21 | 2 |
1869 | I'm a good guy with a spear | 1.2174 | 0.05535 | 92 | 77 | 10 | 5 |
1870 | You’re wearing that to defend the castle? | 1.2174 | 0.05315 | 92 | 76 | 12 | 4 |
1871 | Wait till you see the fire-breathing seagulls. | 1.2174 | 0.04845 | 92 | 74 | 16 | 2 |
1872 | My temp agency has really outdone itself this time. | 1.2170 | 0.04447 | 106 | 85 | 19 | 2 |
1873 | Whoever said “you should dress for the job you want” was not a lifeguard who wanted to be a knight. Or I guess I should say I doubt he was. | 1.2170 | 0.04645 | 106 | 86 | 17 | 3 |
1874 | I told my parents that I got a job at Mar-a-Lago beach club and this is what they bought me. | 1.2169 | 0.05950 | 83 | 70 | 8 | 5 |
1875 | The training order is sandcastle, sheep shed, Buckingham Palace, and then the Queen's Corgis. | 1.2169 | 0.05156 | 83 | 67 | 14 | 2 |
1876 | Not a good idea to win a joust with the King | 1.2169 | 0.05434 | 83 | 68 | 12 | 3 |
1877 | The suit is a bit overboard but how else can I show that I make $500,000/year watching people build sandcastles in LA! | 1.2169 | 0.05156 | 83 | 67 | 14 | 2 |
1878 | I said I needed a night in a shiny harbor. | 1.2167 | 0.04611 | 120 | 99 | 16 | 5 |
1879 | The tides are both our enemy. | 1.2167 | 0.04457 | 120 | 98 | 18 | 4 |
1880 | Verily, I shall defend thy castle to my dying breath...or high tide. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
1881 | These days, it’s all I can afford. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
1882 | How about you and I storm the castle? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
1883 | So I goes, "Shark! Who goes there?" | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
1884 | I actually prefer the knight shift. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
1885 | I think the castle's weak point attacks from the sea. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
1886 | I guard castles, not lives. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
1887 | It's okay, I qualified at the moat. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
1888 | What dost thou mean, 'not looking' for a knight in shining armor? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
1889 | Maybe this is what the founding fathers meant when they wrote the second amendment | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
1890 | I wouldn't say that chivalry is dead, m'Lady But it's asking a lot to ask a knight To fill his armor with chaffing and corroding sand To save but a single sand crab. | 1.2164 | 0.04661 | 134 | 113 | 13 | 8 |
1891 | If you could save the damsels at sea; I'll save the damsels on land | 1.2162 | 0.05023 | 111 | 93 | 12 | 6 |
1892 | Watching over my realm ain't no day at the beach. | 1.2162 | 0.04686 | 111 | 91 | 16 | 4 |
1893 | You're worried about saving lives? My entire future is in danger! | 1.2162 | 0.04858 | 111 | 92 | 14 | 5 |
1894 | What with the economy, this is the best my king could afford near the beach. | 1.2162 | 0.05533 | 74 | 60 | 12 | 2 |
1895 | I miss the Crusades. | 1.2160 | 0.04626 | 125 | 104 | 15 | 6 |
1896 | I got this. | 1.2159 | 0.05225 | 88 | 72 | 13 | 3 |
1897 | I think it's fair to say this job will be short-lived. | 1.2159 | 0.04411 | 88 | 69 | 19 | 0 |
1898 | Moat, Remoat, work is work. | 1.2159 | 0.05225 | 88 | 72 | 13 | 3 |
1899 | Yeah, due to climate change the Rubicon River is way deeper and wilder than ever. | 1.2159 | 0.04968 | 88 | 71 | 15 | 2 |
1900 | Not what I thought the "night" shift was. | 1.2159 | 0.05469 | 88 | 73 | 11 | 4 |
1901 | I’m never playing Fantasy Football again | 1.2159 | 0.04968 | 88 | 71 | 15 | 2 |
1902 | High tidings. | 1.2159 | 0.05225 | 88 | 72 | 13 | 3 |
1903 | Nah, nothing to do with that castle, I'm the Rutgers mascot. | 1.2157 | 0.05144 | 102 | 85 | 12 | 5 |
1904 | Being a parent has lots of joys and risks. My kids think I’m protecting their castle at least until high tide. Wanna go for a drink after my hard day of defence? | 1.2157 | 0.04951 | 102 | 84 | 14 | 4 |
1905 | Call me, Sir Rusty Britches ! | 1.2157 | 0.04751 | 102 | 83 | 16 | 3 |
1906 | Netflix is promoting its new King Arthur series. I assure you,this is not why I went to acting school. | 1.2157 | 0.04323 | 102 | 81 | 20 | 1 |
1907 | You know, if you are going to be my damsel in distress, you really can't be doing the "rescuing. | 1.2157 | 0.04751 | 102 | 83 | 16 | 3 |
1908 | Unembellished, lifeguarding is pretty dull...: | 1.2155 | 0.04550 | 116 | 95 | 17 | 4 |
1909 | Ho Hum, another pointless cartoon about a guy wearing a suit of armor | 1.2154 | 0.04501 | 130 | 108 | 16 | 6 |
1910 | I’ll defend the castle, you watch for sharks. | 1.2152 | 0.05603 | 79 | 65 | 11 | 3 |
1911 | Sorry babe, I only save royalty. | 1.2152 | 0.05305 | 79 | 64 | 13 | 2 |
1912 | The spirit of King Canute flows through me! | 1.2151 | 0.05036 | 93 | 76 | 14 | 3 |
1913 | I am NOT a dirty rascal! | 1.2151 | 0.05263 | 93 | 77 | 12 | 4 |
1914 | It pays better than lifeguarding, actually. | 1.2151 | 0.04548 | 93 | 74 | 18 | 1 |
1915 | I can’t swim, so I thought, what the hell …. why not? | 1.2151 | 0.05690 | 93 | 79 | 8 | 6 |
1916 | SOMEONE'S GOT TO GUARD THE CASTLE | 1.2151 | 0.05036 | 93 | 76 | 14 | 3 |
1917 | Looks like you might need my help defending against high tide. | 1.2151 | 0.04548 | 93 | 74 | 18 | 1 |
1918 | Looks like I will be done here in a couple of hours. Want to grab a bite to eat? | 1.2150 | 0.04410 | 107 | 86 | 19 | 2 |
1919 | I’ll defend against the horseshoe crabs. You watch for any 6 year olds. | 1.2149 | 0.04577 | 121 | 100 | 16 | 5 |
1920 | I know, right? Me too! That sand castle reminds me a lot of the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest!" | 1.2149 | 0.04577 | 121 | 100 | 16 | 5 |
1921 | I don't see how you're equipped to guard lives. | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
1922 | I've rusted in place. Can you mind the castle? | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
1923 | Well then, what do you do for a living in the off-season? | 1.2143 | 0.04504 | 84 | 66 | 18 | 0 |
1924 | The Shark Sightings signs really work, don’t they? | 1.2143 | 0.05101 | 84 | 68 | 14 | 2 |
1925 | What? I don’t care if it’s 2022! You’re still on a pedestal. | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
1926 | I'd save the castle, but I'll just get rusty. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
1927 | The moat costs are much lower at this scale. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
1928 | You should see my windmill. | 1.2143 | 0.04812 | 84 | 67 | 16 | 1 |
1929 | Maybe I should’ve made the moat a little wider and deeper. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
1930 | I obviously misunderstood the term lifeguard. | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
1931 | You take the ocean, I'll take the moat. | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
1932 | No. I don't carry sun screen. You wouldn't have any ice? | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
1933 | If I can successfully defend it they'll promote me to some kid's sofa cushion fort. | 1.2143 | 0.04472 | 112 | 91 | 18 | 3 |
1934 | Cool it with the lightening jokes! | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
1935 | With my spear and your buoy, our defense is impenetrable. | 1.2143 | 0.05280 | 98 | 82 | 11 | 5 |
1936 | Last summer I guarded at Loch Ness | 1.2143 | 0.04412 | 98 | 78 | 19 | 1 |
1937 | Pardon me, would you have any grey poupon? | 1.2143 | 0.05375 | 84 | 69 | 12 | 3 |
1938 | Baywatch Knights with David Castlehoff | 1.2143 | 0.04504 | 84 | 66 | 18 | 0 |
1939 | Yeah, the lance may be overkill. | 1.2143 | 0.04412 | 98 | 78 | 19 | 1 |
1940 | Sharks won't touch me. | 1.2143 | 0.04288 | 112 | 90 | 20 | 2 |
1941 | I never seem to be able to leave work behind when I am on vacation | 1.2143 | 0.05101 | 84 | 68 | 14 | 2 |
1942 | My Mom's very supportive of my lifestyle | 1.2143 | 0.04648 | 112 | 92 | 16 | 4 |
1943 | If you think that’s impressive, wait’ll see what else I can carve with this spear | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
1944 | Speak for yourself — some of us *are* knights in shining armor. | 1.2143 | 0.05475 | 98 | 83 | 9 | 6 |
1945 | You expect to protect the castle wearing that? | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
1946 | You don't have to work knights? | 1.2137 | 0.04675 | 117 | 97 | 15 | 5 |
1947 | Ever see a Trojan Crab? | 1.2137 | 0.04175 | 117 | 94 | 21 | 2 |
1948 | Lancelot … James Lancelot | 1.2137 | 0.04348 | 117 | 95 | 19 | 3 |
1949 | They said it was going to be an easy summer job. | 1.2136 | 0.04709 | 103 | 84 | 16 | 3 |
1950 | I bring you high tidings, fair life-wench. Thusly, you're gonna need a bigger moat. | 1.2136 | 0.05098 | 103 | 86 | 12 | 5 |
1951 | We're spearheading a new development. | 1.2136 | 0.05098 | 103 | 86 | 12 | 5 |
1952 | It's more like SPF 500, but only when the visor is down. | 1.2136 | 0.04709 | 103 | 84 | 16 | 3 |
1953 | Would you be interested in an armorous relationship? | 1.2136 | 0.04709 | 103 | 84 | 16 | 3 |
1954 | Hey, I got an idea. D'ya think maybe time and tide might wait for a woman? | 1.2136 | 0.04503 | 103 | 83 | 18 | 2 |
1955 | Waiting for black’s next move | 1.2136 | 0.04709 | 103 | 84 | 16 | 3 |
1956 | Left my sunscreen in the castle | 1.2135 | 0.05171 | 89 | 73 | 13 | 3 |
1957 | First day? | 1.2135 | 0.05171 | 89 | 73 | 13 | 3 |
1958 | The King sent me, who sent you? | 1.2135 | 0.04918 | 89 | 72 | 15 | 2 |
1959 | Because the siege is the best part. | 1.2135 | 0.04918 | 89 | 72 | 15 | 2 |
1960 | Mi Casa su Casa | 1.2135 | 0.05412 | 89 | 74 | 11 | 4 |
1961 | I'm a sovereign citizen, bitch | 1.2135 | 0.05412 | 89 | 74 | 11 | 4 |
1962 | Sharks don’t breathe fire. Checkmate. | 1.2135 | 0.04918 | 89 | 72 | 15 | 2 |
1963 | This is a lot better than killing baby dragons. | 1.2135 | 0.04368 | 89 | 70 | 19 | 0 |
1964 | My horse is afraid of sharks. | 1.2135 | 0.05171 | 89 | 73 | 13 | 3 |
1965 | It’s part of my fish phobia therapy | 1.2135 | 0.04918 | 89 | 72 | 15 | 2 |
1966 | I said, would you like to go get some ice cream later? | 1.2133 | 0.05467 | 75 | 61 | 12 | 2 |
1967 | I was asked to guard this castle and I take my work very seriously | 1.2133 | 0.05787 | 75 | 62 | 10 | 3 |
1968 | Got any spare oil? | 1.2130 | 0.04567 | 108 | 88 | 17 | 3 |
1969 | Ya,sure. Hot in summer,cold in winter,but it pays year | 1.2130 | 0.04567 | 108 | 88 | 17 | 3 |
1970 | Hey, ever cross the Rubicon? | 1.2130 | 0.04567 | 108 | 88 | 17 | 3 |
1971 | For one thing,can we talk about tan lines? | 1.2130 | 0.04753 | 108 | 89 | 15 | 4 |
1972 | I'm only on duty during low tide | 1.2128 | 0.04505 | 94 | 75 | 18 | 1 |
1973 | I find it hard to unplug even when I am on vacation | 1.2128 | 0.04987 | 94 | 77 | 14 | 3 |
1974 | I love protecting the moat with you. | 1.2128 | 0.04987 | 94 | 77 | 14 | 3 |
1975 | Yes wearing this is hot, but my biggest problem is the rust | 1.2128 | 0.05427 | 94 | 79 | 10 | 5 |
1976 | I was assigned to guard Sandwich Castle | 1.2128 | 0.04752 | 94 | 76 | 16 | 2 |
1977 | Let them eat sand | 1.2128 | 0.05212 | 94 | 78 | 12 | 4 |
1978 | My king takes all of his castles seriously. | 1.2128 | 0.04244 | 94 | 74 | 20 | 0 |
1979 | I’m here to defend against dragonflies. | 1.2128 | 0.04244 | 94 | 74 | 20 | 0 |
1980 | Me? I’m the Sentry on this watch. | 1.2128 | 0.04987 | 94 | 77 | 14 | 3 |
1981 | It’s been a really boring summer. | 1.2125 | 0.04602 | 80 | 63 | 17 | 0 |
1982 | So you’re saying DON’T let them drown? | 1.2125 | 0.06083 | 80 | 68 | 7 | 5 |
1983 | I built it. That’s why I’m defending it. | 1.2125 | 0.05539 | 80 | 66 | 11 | 3 |
1984 | I can assure you Madam, that 'Defender of Dumb Decisions' is a real job | 1.2125 | 0.05817 | 80 | 67 | 9 | 4 |
1985 | After lifeguard training, I got certified for guarding castle moats. | 1.2125 | 0.05245 | 80 | 65 | 13 | 2 |
1986 | There will be no tan lines for me. | 1.2125 | 0.05245 | 80 | 65 | 13 | 2 |
1987 | According to my weather app, attack is imminent. | 1.2124 | 0.04611 | 113 | 93 | 16 | 4 |
1988 | How would you like to visit my real castle?" | 1.2124 | 0.04779 | 113 | 94 | 14 | 5 |
1989 | I felt a moat would be superfluous. | 1.2124 | 0.04779 | 113 | 94 | 14 | 5 |
1990 | Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on sand, but I built it all the same, just to show them. | 1.2124 | 0.04779 | 113 | 94 | 14 | 5 |
1991 | The enemy is advancing! Wait, now they're retreating. | 1.2121 | 0.05611 | 99 | 85 | 7 | 7 |
1992 | The moat is moot | 1.2121 | 0.05231 | 99 | 83 | 11 | 5 |
1993 | I’m waiting for the tide to turn before I cross the Rubicon. | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
1994 | I left my sunscreen in my other armor. | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
1995 | Fetch the King his juice box, wench. | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
1996 | As a knight, I'm about as errant as you can get. | 1.2121 | 0.05030 | 99 | 82 | 13 | 4 |
1997 | Marry Me | 1.2121 | 0.05231 | 99 | 83 | 11 | 5 |
1998 | Huh. I never considered suiting up could be so casual. | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
1999 | Yes it’s great protection from the sun but the sand in the crack in my ass in driving me nuts. | 1.2121 | 0.05030 | 99 | 82 | 13 | 4 |
2000 | That's one big moat. | 1.2121 | 0.05030 | 99 | 82 | 13 | 4 |
2001 | So, how big are the dragons around here? | 1.2121 | 0.04130 | 99 | 78 | 21 | 0 |
2002 | They said this was the highest SPF available. | 1.2119 | 0.04792 | 118 | 99 | 13 | 6 |
2003 | You get the swimmers; I protect the castle. | 1.2118 | 0.05317 | 85 | 70 | 12 | 3 |
2004 | I went through the 12 week program. You? | 1.2118 | 0.05317 | 85 | 70 | 12 | 3 |
2005 | ...it's a working holiday. | 1.2118 | 0.04762 | 85 | 68 | 16 | 1 |
2006 | I'm waiting for the moat to fill up at high tide. | 1.2118 | 0.05047 | 85 | 69 | 14 | 2 |
2007 | I'm only doing this for my kids. | 1.2118 | 0.04762 | 85 | 68 | 16 | 1 |
2008 | It’s my first assignment. | 1.2118 | 0.05317 | 85 | 70 | 12 | 3 |
2009 | Yeah, well, we all have our little jobs to do. | 1.2118 | 0.05317 | 85 | 70 | 12 | 3 |
2010 | What? I’m looking for a career change. | 1.2118 | 0.04762 | 85 | 68 | 16 | 1 |
2011 | Better to be over prepared than not prepared enough. | 1.2118 | 0.05317 | 85 | 70 | 12 | 3 |
2012 | Guarding Castle Hoff | 1.2115 | 0.05234 | 104 | 88 | 10 | 6 |
2013 | We have clearly put a stop to dragons and drownings in the moat. | 1.2115 | 0.04864 | 104 | 86 | 14 | 4 |
2014 | Potato, patato; you call it siege against the rising oceans; I call it a castle made of sand. | 1.2115 | 0.04250 | 104 | 83 | 20 | 1 |
2015 | It's small, but it's paid for. Anita Barlow, Edmond, Oklahoma | 1.2115 | 0.04864 | 104 | 86 | 14 | 4 |
2016 | Well now I feel silly- this chair is completely unnecessary. | 1.2113 | 0.05644 | 71 | 58 | 11 | 2 |
2017 | Well, the armor doesn’t shine itself | 1.2113 | 0.05644 | 71 | 58 | 11 | 2 |
2018 | Excuse me damsel, may I borrow some zinc oxide for my nose? My armor is shining directly on my face | 1.2111 | 0.04869 | 90 | 73 | 15 | 2 |
2019 | I need a new agent! | 1.2111 | 0.05119 | 90 | 74 | 13 | 3 |
2020 | My name is Sir Fir | 1.2111 | 0.05585 | 90 | 76 | 9 | 5 |
2021 | Okay, you won that first bet. But I you I can still swim in this thing! | 1.2111 | 0.05357 | 90 | 75 | 11 | 4 |
2022 | Will you help me? If the castle get destroyed the king will make me do the sink or swim test. | 1.2111 | 0.05357 | 90 | 75 | 11 | 4 |
2023 | No, I’m quite comfortable. A law was made a distant moon ago here: July and August cannot be too hot. | 1.2111 | 0.05357 | 90 | 75 | 11 | 4 |
2024 | What’s this January 6th you speak of? | 1.2111 | 0.04869 | 90 | 73 | 15 | 2 |
2025 | The armor is to protect me from the sun; sitting by the castle was just a happy accident. | 1.2111 | 0.04869 | 90 | 73 | 15 | 2 |
2026 | I'd prefer a full-time position, but a temp job is better than nothing. | 1.2110 | 0.04529 | 109 | 89 | 17 | 3 |
2027 | This castle has been in the family for 57 generations. | 1.2110 | 0.04713 | 109 | 90 | 15 | 4 |
2028 | Hey, are you noticing that it is a little hotter today? | 1.2110 | 0.04713 | 109 | 90 | 15 | 4 |
2029 | Damn, it's hot in this armour. | 1.2110 | 0.04337 | 109 | 88 | 19 | 2 |
2030 | You have a face that could launch a thousand surfboards. | 1.2105 | 0.04708 | 95 | 77 | 16 | 2 |
2031 | It may be quiet now, but there is always a good crowd for the changing of the guard. | 1.2105 | 0.05402 | 76 | 62 | 12 | 2 |
2032 | Would you mind helping me down? My armor is rusted. | 1.2105 | 0.04463 | 95 | 76 | 18 | 1 |
2033 | I thought it was my knight off. | 1.2105 | 0.04940 | 95 | 78 | 14 | 3 |
2034 | May I call you Dulcinea? | 1.2105 | 0.04463 | 95 | 76 | 18 | 1 |
2035 | Yes, but it’s spelled g-u-ä-r-d | 1.2105 | 0.04740 | 114 | 95 | 14 | 5 |
2036 | A kid tried to stomp it, so I’m down to one spear. | 1.2105 | 0.05717 | 76 | 63 | 10 | 3 |
2037 | I'm wating for a damsel in distress so I can recreate a mythical gender archetype. | 1.2100 | 0.04560 | 100 | 81 | 17 | 2 |
2038 | They worship me as a god. | 1.2100 | 0.04777 | 100 | 82 | 15 | 3 |
2039 | Fight you for it? | 1.2100 | 0.04333 | 100 | 80 | 19 | 1 |
2040 | Jellyfish season may be over, but keep an eye out for the Saxons. | 1.2100 | 0.04560 | 100 | 81 | 17 | 2 |
2041 | I just don't feel your commitment. | 1.2100 | 0.04333 | 100 | 80 | 19 | 1 |
2042 | I thought they said Sandhurst. | 1.2100 | 0.04984 | 100 | 83 | 13 | 4 |
2043 | How long? Ever since the Hermit Crab invasion of 1782 | 1.2099 | 0.05476 | 81 | 67 | 11 | 3 |
2044 | Why? I got the new benefit package. | 1.2099 | 0.05187 | 81 | 66 | 13 | 2 |
2045 | All I said was, "I'd like to look over the castle while you're gone,Sire". | 1.2099 | 0.05476 | 81 | 67 | 11 | 3 |
2046 | I thought I had the knight shift? | 1.2099 | 0.05476 | 81 | 67 | 11 | 3 |
2047 | I’m only here until the drawbridge is completed. | 1.2099 | 0.05476 | 81 | 67 | 11 | 3 |
2048 | Listen Guinevere, just because we’ve reset our careers doesn’t mean I’m abandoning my quest! | 1.2099 | 0.04553 | 81 | 64 | 17 | 0 |
2049 | I'll slay the dragons, you can save the peasants | 1.2099 | 0.04880 | 81 | 65 | 15 | 1 |
2050 | Too much cosplay? | 1.2095 | 0.04628 | 105 | 86 | 16 | 3 |
2051 | It doesn’t appear the tide will turn but it’s been an honor. | 1.2095 | 0.04822 | 105 | 87 | 14 | 4 |
2052 | So what's the difference between a tide and a moat? | 1.2093 | 0.04994 | 86 | 70 | 14 | 2 |
2053 | At least I have a hobby that’s multifaceted. | 1.2093 | 0.04994 | 86 | 70 | 14 | 2 |
2054 | It's the sharks you've got to worry about | 1.2093 | 0.04994 | 86 | 70 | 14 | 2 |
2055 | They sent me to relieve you, I will be working the night shift. | 1.2091 | 0.04492 | 110 | 90 | 17 | 3 |
2056 | We’re all trying to find the guy who did this. | 1.2091 | 0.04674 | 110 | 91 | 15 | 4 |
2057 | Would you like a knight in shining armor to defend your castle too? | 1.2091 | 0.04849 | 110 | 92 | 13 | 5 |
2058 | I'd take it off, but I don't know if you've seen a man's heart before. | 1.2091 | 0.04674 | 110 | 91 | 15 | 4 |
2059 | ‘Even the castle market isn’t immune to inflation’ | 1.2091 | 0.04492 | 110 | 90 | 17 | 3 |
2060 | Global warming is a myth. | 1.2091 | 0.04492 | 110 | 90 | 17 | 3 |
2061 | I'm also one of the top troubadours in the Holy Roman Empire. | 1.2088 | 0.04821 | 91 | 74 | 15 | 2 |
2062 | Sometimes it's a guard-awful business. | 1.2088 | 0.04560 | 91 | 73 | 17 | 1 |
2063 | I'm on guard duty until the next high tide. | 1.2088 | 0.05068 | 91 | 75 | 13 | 3 |
2064 | I’ve been reassigned pending investigations, you? | 1.2088 | 0.05068 | 91 | 75 | 13 | 3 |
2065 | It’s bigger on the inside. | 1.2088 | 0.04560 | 91 | 73 | 17 | 1 |
2066 | My weekday job is playing Lance in Camelot. | 1.2088 | 0.04560 | 91 | 73 | 17 | 1 |
2067 | What is this “tidal force” you speak of? | 1.2088 | 0.05303 | 91 | 76 | 11 | 4 |
2068 | Beats me. I don't know why it needs a moat. | 1.2088 | 0.05068 | 91 | 75 | 13 | 3 |
2069 | Would you mind defending my castle while I go get a chili dog? | 1.2088 | 0.04821 | 91 | 74 | 15 | 2 |
2070 | I don’t get many swimmers on the knight shift. | 1.2087 | 0.04537 | 115 | 95 | 16 | 4 |
2071 | When the tide comes in, please make sure I am well-oiled too. | 1.2087 | 0.04537 | 115 | 95 | 16 | 4 |
2072 | It’s just until the moat fills. | 1.2083 | 0.04422 | 96 | 77 | 18 | 1 |
2073 | you watch the kids, I've got the castle. | 1.2083 | 0.04893 | 96 | 79 | 14 | 3 |
2074 | I know that it may be a little over the top, but this will be my son's first trip to the beach. | 1.2083 | 0.04893 | 96 | 79 | 14 | 3 |
2075 | If they build it we will come. | 1.2083 | 0.04422 | 96 | 77 | 18 | 1 |
2076 | Okay, you handle the CPR. I'll lance the jellyfish stingers. | 1.2083 | 0.04893 | 96 | 79 | 14 | 3 |
2077 | How did you know that 'Rust Never Sleeps' was my favorite Neil Young song? | 1.2083 | 0.04422 | 96 | 77 | 18 | 1 |
2078 | Believe it or not I have a round table in my dining room. | 1.2083 | 0.05112 | 96 | 80 | 12 | 4 |
2079 | Rumour has it that they're laying off staff. I'd be worried if I were you. | 1.2083 | 0.04893 | 96 | 79 | 14 | 3 |
2080 | And when the rest of my army arrives, we'll build a bigger castle and a moat. | 1.2083 | 0.05573 | 72 | 59 | 11 | 2 |
2081 | It’s SPF 600 and rated for class B dragons. But yeah, heat stroke DOES concern me. | 1.2083 | 0.05573 | 72 | 59 | 11 | 2 |
2082 | You worried about Vikings too? | 1.2083 | 0.04422 | 96 | 77 | 18 | 1 |
2083 | So you save incoming invaders…? | 1.2079 | 0.05135 | 101 | 85 | 11 | 5 |
2084 | You wouldn't believe the SPF on this suit! | 1.2079 | 0.04734 | 101 | 83 | 15 | 3 |
2085 | I'm here to defend the castle. Who, pray tell, are you | 1.2079 | 0.04520 | 101 | 82 | 17 | 2 |
2086 | You didn't say anything about my armor. Is it not shiny enough? | 1.2079 | 0.04520 | 101 | 82 | 17 | 2 |
2087 | Would you mind sharing some of your sunscreen oil? My legs are starting to creek. | 1.2079 | 0.04734 | 101 | 83 | 15 | 3 |
2088 | Yes, it's a codpiece, and yes, I'm happy to see you." | 1.2079 | 0.04939 | 101 | 84 | 13 | 4 |
2089 | I get the wildest tan lines. | 1.2079 | 0.04734 | 101 | 83 | 15 | 3 |
2090 | I alone can repel time and tide. | 1.2078 | 0.05649 | 77 | 64 | 10 | 3 |
2091 | So if they drown, it means they're a witch. | 1.2078 | 0.05338 | 77 | 63 | 12 | 2 |
2092 | They told me to watch over the serfs. | 1.2078 | 0.05338 | 77 | 63 | 12 | 2 |
2093 | Yeah, someday I'll be sitting at the round table, but today I got sandcastle moat duty. | 1.2078 | 0.05008 | 77 | 62 | 14 | 1 |
2094 | I'll hold the fort while you take your break. | 1.2078 | 0.06225 | 77 | 66 | 6 | 5 |
2095 | Yes, I can move one space forward and two spaces sideways, or vice versa. I was hired to save the crabs! | 1.2075 | 0.04589 | 106 | 87 | 16 | 3 |
2096 | I hate guard duty. | 1.2075 | 0.04388 | 106 | 86 | 18 | 2 |
2097 | I made a moat to protect your sand castle. | 1.2075 | 0.04780 | 106 | 88 | 14 | 4 |
2098 | I fought for a raise successfully. | 1.2075 | 0.04589 | 106 | 87 | 16 | 3 |
2099 | Never the less, its a fixer upper with a water front view | 1.2073 | 0.04827 | 82 | 66 | 15 | 1 |
2100 | If you teach me to swim I’ll give you a tour | 1.2073 | 0.05415 | 82 | 68 | 11 | 3 |
2101 | I told you that I was doing the knight watch | 1.2073 | 0.04827 | 82 | 66 | 15 | 1 |
2102 | I’m the night shift | 1.2072 | 0.04976 | 111 | 94 | 11 | 6 |
2103 | Silence wench! | 1.2072 | 0.04635 | 111 | 92 | 15 | 4 |
2104 | One day this will be ours! | 1.2069 | 0.04942 | 87 | 71 | 14 | 2 |
2105 | They didn't tell you I'm just the entertainment? | 1.2069 | 0.04332 | 116 | 95 | 18 | 3 |
2106 | In this economy, I'll take any size I can get. | 1.2069 | 0.04332 | 116 | 95 | 18 | 3 |
2107 | When you say “Overboard,” do you mean in a nautical sense? | 1.2069 | 0.04942 | 87 | 71 | 14 | 2 |
2108 | I find it more effective than sunscreen. | 1.2069 | 0.05206 | 87 | 72 | 12 | 3 |
2109 | The leafy seadragon, Phycodurus eques, grows to a fearsome twenty-four centimeters. I'm prepared, are you? | 1.2069 | 0.04665 | 116 | 97 | 14 | 5 |
2110 | Don’t look at me like that. I’m just following the King’s orders. | 1.2069 | 0.03971 | 116 | 93 | 22 | 1 |
2111 | Mi castle es su castle. | 1.2069 | 0.05456 | 87 | 73 | 10 | 4 |
2112 | I came straight here from my knight job and didn't have time to change | 1.2069 | 0.05206 | 87 | 72 | 12 | 3 |
2113 | No, I can't swim. I'm from central casting | 1.2069 | 0.04664 | 87 | 70 | 16 | 1 |
2114 | We’re lucky to have these jobs. | 1.2069 | 0.03777 | 116 | 92 | 24 | 0 |
2115 | I guess I thought LARPing would be less passive. | 1.2069 | 0.05696 | 87 | 74 | 8 | 5 |
2116 | Daddy said I can have a real one if I do a good job and don’t let anyone crush it. | 1.2069 | 0.05206 | 87 | 72 | 12 | 3 |
2117 | Say one wrong thing to the emperor and you get demoted. | 1.2065 | 0.05017 | 92 | 76 | 13 | 3 |
2118 | I'd prefer to stay out of the water | 1.2065 | 0.05250 | 92 | 77 | 11 | 4 |
2119 | I only use sunscreen that's SPF level 'Siege'. | 1.2065 | 0.05473 | 92 | 78 | 9 | 5 |
2120 | But I worked so hard on it. | 1.2065 | 0.05017 | 92 | 76 | 13 | 3 |
2121 | I feel much more relaxed since going freelance. | 1.2065 | 0.05250 | 92 | 77 | 11 | 4 |
2122 | To save the children or save the castle? That is the question. | 1.2065 | 0.04773 | 92 | 75 | 15 | 2 |
2123 | The coastguard’s finest men guarding their most impenetrable fort. | 1.2065 | 0.04516 | 92 | 74 | 17 | 1 |
2124 | You could fry an egg on my codpiece | 1.2065 | 0.05017 | 92 | 76 | 13 | 3 |
2125 | The ad said ‘ guard needed for castle’” Jeffrey Manly Toronto, Ont | 1.2065 | 0.05017 | 92 | 76 | 13 | 3 |
2126 | I'm a big USC Trojans fan. | 1.2065 | 0.04516 | 92 | 74 | 17 | 1 |
2127 | I got the castle, you take the rest. Ok? | 1.2065 | 0.05017 | 92 | 76 | 13 | 3 |
2128 | Guard" is a keyword on my résumé | 1.2062 | 0.04847 | 97 | 80 | 14 | 3 |
2129 | Can you watch this for a sec? That snow cone went right through me. | 1.2062 | 0.05271 | 97 | 82 | 10 | 5 |
2130 | If the squeaking bothers you that much, let me borrow your suntan oil! | 1.2062 | 0.04381 | 97 | 78 | 18 | 1 |
2131 | Can I, at least, be the king of THIS castle? | 1.2062 | 0.05064 | 97 | 81 | 12 | 4 |
2132 | And they say chivalry is dead? You can have my sunscreen too! | 1.2062 | 0.04620 | 97 | 79 | 16 | 2 |
2133 | I'm getting more serious about my sunblock these days. | 1.2062 | 0.04620 | 97 | 79 | 16 | 2 |
2134 | the ad said someone to guard the castle! | 1.2062 | 0.04847 | 97 | 80 | 14 | 3 |
2135 | Honestly, it’s easier than applying sunscreen. | 1.2062 | 0.04381 | 97 | 78 | 18 | 1 |
2136 | Yeah? You’re wheelchair is stupid. | 1.2062 | 0.04847 | 97 | 80 | 14 | 3 |
2137 | His Lordship has gone to the snack bar. | 1.2062 | 0.04381 | 97 | 78 | 18 | 1 |
2138 | As they say, ‘whatever floats your moat.’ | 1.2062 | 0.04620 | 97 | 79 | 16 | 2 |
2139 | The castle looked bigger in the guard job posting | 1.2062 | 0.04620 | 97 | 79 | 16 | 2 |
2140 | You guard the lives, I'll guard the castle. Deal, M'lady? | 1.2059 | 0.04480 | 102 | 83 | 17 | 2 |
2141 | I have the castel and the moat. I just need a damsel in distress. | 1.2059 | 0.04480 | 102 | 83 | 17 | 2 |
2142 | In case the moat is breached. | 1.2059 | 0.04480 | 102 | 83 | 17 | 2 |
2143 | I’m the new sand castle guard. | 1.2059 | 0.04258 | 102 | 82 | 19 | 1 |
2144 | Oh, the Dynasty really started going downhill after the last tide. | 1.2059 | 0.04894 | 102 | 85 | 13 | 4 |
2145 | How the hell do we get in? | 1.2059 | 0.04692 | 102 | 84 | 15 | 3 |
2146 | You call that a suit? | 1.2059 | 0.04692 | 102 | 84 | 15 | 3 |
2147 | I think I'm more equipped to defend a castle ... | 1.2059 | 0.04692 | 102 | 84 | 15 | 3 |
2148 | Do me a favor, if anyone asks tell them your name is also Spartacus. | 1.2056 | 0.04739 | 107 | 89 | 14 | 4 |
2149 | Attracts lots of little people in scuba gear looking for Disneyland | 1.2056 | 0.04351 | 107 | 87 | 18 | 2 |
2150 | Oh, that's not my castle. I'm just working remotely today. | 1.2056 | 0.04550 | 107 | 88 | 16 | 3 |
2151 | I swore a solemn oath to my liege lord to protect and defend this castle -- but, having said that, happy hour sounds great! | 1.2055 | 0.05839 | 73 | 61 | 9 | 3 |
2152 | I’m waiting for high tide to storm the castle. | 1.2054 | 0.04233 | 112 | 91 | 19 | 2 |
2153 | "No sunblock, but I do apply non-stick cooling oil. | 1.2051 | 0.04467 | 117 | 97 | 16 | 4 |
2154 | It’s a temporary gig | 1.2051 | 0.04124 | 117 | 95 | 20 | 2 |
2155 | I'm not trying to be one........ Because it reflects better than oily sun screen. | 1.2051 | 0.04124 | 117 | 95 | 20 | 2 |
2156 | My daughter is a princess. | 1.2048 | 0.05073 | 83 | 68 | 13 | 2 |
2157 | Not ideal for swimming, but it's 15,000 SPF. | 1.2048 | 0.05355 | 83 | 69 | 11 | 3 |
2158 | Whose life are you guarding, in particular? | 1.2048 | 0.04457 | 83 | 66 | 17 | 0 |
2159 | Fake it ‘til you make it—amirite? | 1.2048 | 0.05355 | 83 | 69 | 11 | 3 |
2160 | It turns out I had a very narrow mindset about what an "Armored Guard" job was. | 1.2045 | 0.04891 | 88 | 72 | 14 | 2 |
2161 | I did not plan on his Lordship’s moat having a riptide. | 1.2045 | 0.04617 | 88 | 71 | 16 | 1 |
2162 | Low tide and rust are my worst enemies. | 1.2045 | 0.05636 | 88 | 75 | 8 | 5 |
2163 | They are paying me twenty-teo bucks an hour to defend the castle | 1.2045 | 0.05152 | 88 | 73 | 12 | 3 |
2164 | In case of an attack by dragon flies. | 1.2045 | 0.05152 | 88 | 73 | 12 | 3 |
2165 | Second amendment circa 100 BCE | 1.2045 | 0.05152 | 88 | 73 | 12 | 3 |
2166 | Here's the Deal. You deal with the sharks, I'll deal with the Dragons | 1.2045 | 0.05152 | 88 | 73 | 12 | 3 |
2167 | I’m a fief-guard, you see. | 1.2045 | 0.05152 | 88 | 73 | 12 | 3 |
2168 | I'm just a pawn in the king's elaborate shell game. | 1.2045 | 0.04891 | 88 | 72 | 14 | 2 |
2169 | You did great for your first day, but you can't spend the night" | 1.2045 | 0.05152 | 88 | 73 | 12 | 3 |
2170 | I'm your medieval twin | 1.2045 | 0.04891 | 88 | 72 | 14 | 2 |
2171 | So, my roommates showed me the movie JAWS last night… | 1.2045 | 0.04617 | 88 | 71 | 16 | 1 |
2172 | The moat for the castle wouldn't fill properly so they hired me for security. | 1.2043 | 0.04204 | 93 | 74 | 19 | 0 |
2173 | The Seaside Renaissance Festival has had downsize substantially, but the parking is amazing. | 1.2043 | 0.05198 | 93 | 78 | 11 | 4 |
2174 | I said I only rescue damsels in distress, not incels. | 1.2043 | 0.05198 | 93 | 78 | 11 | 4 |
2175 | This beach has been popular with visitors since 1066 | 1.2043 | 0.05198 | 93 | 78 | 11 | 4 |
2176 | I hope I don’t have to choose between saving my castle and someone drowning. | 1.2043 | 0.04473 | 93 | 75 | 17 | 1 |
2177 | It’s called Knight Shade spf 1400 | 1.2043 | 0.04727 | 93 | 76 | 15 | 2 |
2178 | Yeah, well I protect it from dragons, so Nyah! | 1.2043 | 0.04968 | 93 | 77 | 13 | 3 |
2179 | Fair maidens in distress are mine, OK? | 1.2043 | 0.04968 | 93 | 77 | 13 | 3 |
2180 | I lost the jousting competition. What did you do? | 1.2043 | 0.04727 | 93 | 76 | 15 | 2 |
2181 | I was instructed to Dress for Success. | 1.2043 | 0.05198 | 93 | 78 | 11 | 4 |
2182 | I was sent by the Republican National Committee. | 1.2043 | 0.04968 | 93 | 77 | 13 | 3 |
2183 | Let's keep an eye on any Torjan Crabs | 1.2043 | 0.04968 | 93 | 77 | 13 | 3 |
2184 | Yeah, but great white sharks aren’t even fire breathing. | 1.2041 | 0.04092 | 98 | 78 | 20 | 0 |
2185 | My kingdom for some SPF 30. | 1.2041 | 0.04577 | 98 | 80 | 16 | 2 |
2186 | It may not look like much, but the moat! | 1.2041 | 0.04802 | 98 | 81 | 14 | 3 |
2187 | I see my role as more defensive than life-saving. | 1.2041 | 0.04802 | 98 | 81 | 14 | 3 |
2188 | You don’t get in my way, and I won’t get in yours. | 1.2041 | 0.04342 | 98 | 79 | 18 | 1 |
2189 | I been guarding this castle since it was constructed.....since 2:30!! | 1.2039 | 0.04851 | 103 | 86 | 13 | 4 |
2190 | What is 'tide'? | 1.2039 | 0.04650 | 103 | 85 | 15 | 3 |
2191 | Usually I only work knight shifts. | 1.2039 | 0.04851 | 103 | 86 | 13 | 4 |
2192 | People call them perks, but really, the upkeep on a squire and steed is murder. This allows me to contemplate my next move. | 1.2039 | 0.04851 | 103 | 86 | 13 | 4 |
2193 | I told him the moat was overkill. | 1.2039 | 0.04650 | 103 | 85 | 15 | 3 |
2194 | I was sent to guard the castle. | 1.2037 | 0.04315 | 108 | 88 | 18 | 2 |
2195 | Do you ever wonder if this beach patrol station is over-staffed?" | 1.2037 | 0.04110 | 108 | 87 | 20 | 1 |
2196 | I'll stick around till the tide comes in. | 1.2037 | 0.04699 | 108 | 90 | 14 | 4 |
2197 | None shall pass! | 1.2034 | 0.04265 | 118 | 97 | 18 | 3 |
2198 | Could you pass me the suntan oil and the WD40? | 1.2034 | 0.04265 | 118 | 97 | 18 | 3 |
2199 | Knight shift. | 1.2027 | 0.05083 | 74 | 60 | 13 | 1 |
2200 | These are some weird horses. | 1.2027 | 0.05435 | 74 | 61 | 11 | 2 |
2201 | Have you been a Lifeguard for awhile? | 1.2025 | 0.05518 | 79 | 66 | 10 | 3 |
2202 | Your answer is still no?? | 1.2024 | 0.04724 | 84 | 68 | 15 | 1 |
2203 | A knight, a castle, but I don't think the moat is designed correctly. | 1.2024 | 0.04724 | 84 | 68 | 15 | 1 |
2204 | The package said it’s rust resistant | 1.2024 | 0.05297 | 84 | 70 | 11 | 3 |
2205 | You go — I'm rusted. | 1.2024 | 0.05019 | 84 | 69 | 13 | 2 |
2206 | Let's keep to our respective domains, okay? | 1.2024 | 0.04724 | 84 | 68 | 15 | 1 |
2207 | Would you happen to have a tide chart? | 1.2024 | 0.04724 | 84 | 68 | 15 | 1 |
2208 | Do you like Chinese food. | 1.2022 | 0.05099 | 89 | 74 | 12 | 3 |
2209 | Agree to disagree on who's life is worth guarding. | 1.2022 | 0.04570 | 89 | 72 | 16 | 1 |
2210 | Yeah, it does get hot in this suit but I save a king’s ransome on sun screen | 1.2022 | 0.05099 | 89 | 74 | 12 | 3 |
2211 | What’s your sigil? | 1.2022 | 0.05099 | 89 | 74 | 12 | 3 |
2212 | Because a three thousand mile moat can only do so much. | 1.2022 | 0.05099 | 89 | 74 | 12 | 3 |
2213 | Remember little Tommy? He asked me to guard his kingdom, and of course I had to say yes. | 1.2022 | 0.04570 | 89 | 72 | 16 | 1 |
2214 | The one who rescues first inherits the castle. | 1.2022 | 0.05343 | 89 | 75 | 10 | 4 |
2215 | I'm told it's a temporary assignment. | 1.2022 | 0.05343 | 89 | 75 | 10 | 4 |
2216 | After a while at this job, you get rusty. | 1.2022 | 0.04842 | 89 | 73 | 14 | 2 |
2217 | Well you don’t look like a guard… | 1.2022 | 0.04570 | 89 | 72 | 16 | 1 |
2218 | Caesar's palace, not sea shore's.. | 1.2021 | 0.04920 | 94 | 78 | 13 | 3 |
2219 | Hast thou sunscreen? | 1.2021 | 0.04920 | 94 | 78 | 13 | 3 |
2220 | I find the waiting exhilarating. And the armor itchy. | 1.2021 | 0.04682 | 94 | 77 | 15 | 2 |
2221 | Protection over buoyancy, that's what I always say. | 1.2021 | 0.05147 | 94 | 79 | 11 | 4 |
2222 | No. I’m the king of the castle! | 1.2021 | 0.04920 | 94 | 78 | 13 | 3 |
2223 | Guarding the castle is all in a knight's work. | 1.2021 | 0.04920 | 94 | 78 | 13 | 3 |
2224 | You save the kid. I don't want to rust. | 1.2021 | 0.04920 | 94 | 78 | 13 | 3 |
2225 | There is a tide in the affairs of men Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune; Omitted, all the voyage of their life Is bound in shallows and in miseries. On such a full sea are we now afloat, And we must take the current when it serves | 1.2021 | 0.05365 | 94 | 80 | 9 | 5 |
2226 | Downsized, yes, but at least I'm not working from home. | 1.2021 | 0.05365 | 94 | 80 | 9 | 5 |
2227 | I’ll take the knight watch. | 1.2021 | 0.05147 | 94 | 79 | 11 | 4 |
2228 | Speared 4 little castle attackers so far, how many did u get? | 1.2021 | 0.04682 | 94 | 77 | 15 | 2 |
2229 | Vikings. | 1.2021 | 0.05147 | 94 | 79 | 11 | 4 |
2230 | You get the next one, I'm rusting. | 1.2020 | 0.04536 | 99 | 81 | 16 | 2 |
2231 | No, you're thinking of a different kind of Trojan! | 1.2020 | 0.05173 | 99 | 84 | 10 | 5 |
2232 | The pay's not great, but I've saved a lot on sunscreen | 1.2020 | 0.04758 | 99 | 82 | 14 | 3 |
2233 | Ok, I should have asked a few more questionsbefore I swore to protect the castle. | 1.2020 | 0.04969 | 99 | 83 | 12 | 4 |
2234 | You watch the moat. I’ve got the dragons. | 1.2020 | 0.04758 | 99 | 82 | 14 | 3 |
2235 | It's King Canute's kid's. | 1.2020 | 0.04302 | 99 | 80 | 18 | 1 |
2236 | So...there's NOT a tiny King, Queen or even a Court Jester in there? | 1.2020 | 0.04302 | 99 | 80 | 18 | 1 |
2237 | See m'lady, cold water makes EVERYTHING shrink. | 1.2020 | 0.04302 | 99 | 80 | 18 | 1 |
2238 | …yeah so I guard, like, this little fort in front right here | 1.2020 | 0.04302 | 99 | 80 | 18 | 1 |
2239 | I'm just an overprotective parent. | 1.2019 | 0.04808 | 104 | 87 | 13 | 4 |
2240 | Guinevere told me size doesn’t matter. | 1.2019 | 0.04998 | 104 | 88 | 11 | 5 |
2241 | Well, it’s better than being turned into a toad. | 1.2019 | 0.04998 | 104 | 88 | 11 | 5 |
2242 | It's temporary until we corral the dragon again. | 1.2019 | 0.04402 | 104 | 85 | 17 | 2 |
2243 | I've sworn to protect this castle from all threats, but I haven't yet figured out how to best the tide. | 1.2018 | 0.04474 | 109 | 90 | 16 | 3 |
2244 | Honey,they did shrink my castle. | 1.2018 | 0.05011 | 109 | 93 | 10 | 6 |
2245 | I’ll see to it that my lord, King Crab, shall swim without your interference. | 1.2018 | 0.04660 | 109 | 91 | 14 | 4 |
2246 | The Round Table de-moated me. | 1.2018 | 0.04280 | 109 | 89 | 18 | 2 |
2247 | They're called Sea Monkeys and I'm not their King, I'm their Champion. Bob is their King and he's gone beer questing. | 1.2018 | 0.05011 | 109 | 93 | 10 | 6 |
2248 | Nobody expects the Spanish Armada! | 1.2018 | 0.04855 | 114 | 97 | 11 | 6 |
2249 | I'm not a fan of sunscreen. | 1.2018 | 0.04349 | 114 | 94 | 17 | 3 |
2250 | I've been told that I tend to micromanage. | 1.2016 | 0.04126 | 124 | 102 | 19 | 3 |
2251 | Forget the swimmers. Help defend my castle. | 1.2000 | 0.04839 | 80 | 65 | 14 | 1 |
2252 | Hey dude'- the swim trunks beneath all that made by Under Armour? | 1.2000 | 0.05500 | 85 | 72 | 9 | 4 |
2253 | Yeah, my Mom is proud of me too. She just can't figure out how to explain it to her friends. | 1.2000 | 0.05369 | 75 | 62 | 11 | 2 |
2254 | Hot enough for you? | 1.2000 | 0.04965 | 85 | 70 | 13 | 2 |
2255 | I'm worried about climate change. | 1.2000 | 0.04793 | 90 | 74 | 14 | 2 |
2256 | My other summer job fell through. | 1.2000 | 0.04569 | 105 | 87 | 15 | 3 |
2257 | They laughed at Don Quixote." Or "Just saving the planet, one sandcastle at a time. | 1.2000 | 0.05097 | 95 | 80 | 11 | 4 |
2258 | The spear is for tonight's marshmallow roast. | 1.2000 | 0.05228 | 70 | 57 | 12 | 1 |
2259 | My therapist suggested I try being less grandiose! | 1.2000 | 0.04965 | 85 | 70 | 13 | 2 |
2260 | Have you seen a steed? | 1.2000 | 0.05288 | 90 | 76 | 10 | 4 |
2261 | The real work starts when the tide comes in! | 1.2000 | 0.04495 | 100 | 82 | 16 | 2 |
2262 | Puny turrets, wimpy moat. | 1.2000 | 0.04965 | 85 | 70 | 13 | 2 |
2263 | Well it was the only summer job that would allow me to also keep up with my cosplay. | 1.2000 | 0.04965 | 85 | 70 | 13 | 2 |
2264 | Take my word...Time has proven that my sunscreen is way more effective than yours. | 1.2000 | 0.04437 | 110 | 91 | 16 | 3 |
2265 | It's a guy thing | 1.2000 | 0.05737 | 80 | 68 | 8 | 4 |
2266 | Not all sperm are strong swimmers. | 1.2000 | 0.05125 | 100 | 85 | 10 | 5 |
2267 | Whenever I have to make a water rescue, I get that sinking feeling." | 1.2000 | 0.04965 | 85 | 70 | 13 | 2 |
2268 | Dulcinea, I'm not overdresssed, high tide arrives in an hour. | 1.2000 | 0.05047 | 90 | 75 | 12 | 3 |
2269 | IKR?! | 1.2000 | 0.04965 | 85 | 70 | 13 | 2 |
2270 | I took an oath to protect castles. | 1.2000 | 0.04500 | 80 | 64 | 16 | 0 |
2271 | The game’s afoot: Once more onto the beach!! | 1.2000 | 0.04674 | 85 | 69 | 15 | 1 |
2272 | Should we be worried about kids stomping around or the tides getting higher? | 1.2000 | 0.04637 | 95 | 78 | 15 | 2 |
2273 | Our other investment are underwater. I'm not taking my eye off this one. | 1.2000 | 0.04793 | 90 | 74 | 14 | 2 |
2274 | I’ll guard the castle; you guard the mote. | 1.2000 | 0.04793 | 90 | 74 | 14 | 2 |
2275 | Can you watch the moat, Milly? I'm feeling a little rusty. | 1.2000 | 0.04954 | 105 | 89 | 11 | 5 |
2276 | They don't make em like they used to. | 1.2000 | 0.04244 | 110 | 90 | 18 | 2 |
2277 | Can you pretend to be a dragon? | 1.2000 | 0.05047 | 90 | 75 | 12 | 3 |
2278 | They call me "Predator Drone." | 1.2000 | 0.05500 | 85 | 72 | 9 | 4 |
2279 | It’s the original mineral sunscreen. | 1.2000 | 0.04793 | 90 | 74 | 14 | 2 |
2280 | I don't care if you think boarder protection is an outdated issue! | 1.2000 | 0.04714 | 100 | 83 | 14 | 3 |
2281 | My favorite comic is "PIKES to Watch Out For" | 1.2000 | 0.05369 | 75 | 62 | 11 | 2 |
2282 | Are you into tiny houses? | 1.2000 | 0.04495 | 100 | 82 | 16 | 2 |
2283 | My nine year old said the word of the day on Sesame Street was 'insurrection'... | 1.2000 | 0.04244 | 110 | 90 | 18 | 2 |
2284 | Veni, vedi, veci, amirite? | 1.2000 | 0.05749 | 85 | 73 | 7 | 5 |
2285 | No, I won’t ‘sink like a car’ in this. | 1.2000 | 0.05454 | 80 | 67 | 10 | 3 |
2286 | A man's gotta do what he must do to protect his home! | 1.2000 | 0.04364 | 85 | 68 | 17 | 0 |
2287 | Oh contrair, fair maiden, this is a no-float moat. | 1.2000 | 0.04487 | 115 | 96 | 15 | 4 |
2288 | It’s all mine, as far as you can see, right up to the shoreline. | 1.2000 | 0.04569 | 105 | 87 | 15 | 3 |
2289 | At last year's visit to the beach, I lost my sandcastle to the tide. It's not happening again. | 1.2000 | 0.04766 | 105 | 88 | 13 | 4 |
2290 | If a storm comes your both in trouble | 1.2000 | 0.04364 | 85 | 68 | 17 | 0 |
2291 | Bathroom breaks are tough. | 1.2000 | 0.04793 | 90 | 74 | 14 | 2 |
2292 | Do youhave any WD-40 and a shovel? | 1.2000 | 0.04569 | 105 | 87 | 15 | 3 |
2293 | Got any sunscreen, milady? | 1.2000 | 0.05519 | 90 | 77 | 8 | 5 |
2294 | You can tell your mother that your dreams are about to come true! | 1.2000 | 0.04495 | 100 | 82 | 16 | 2 |
2295 | You save him. I'll stay here and guard the castle. | 1.2000 | 0.04674 | 85 | 69 | 15 | 1 |
2296 | I gave up on the Grail. | 1.2000 | 0.05369 | 75 | 62 | 11 | 2 |
2297 | A seahorse,a seahorse. My kingdom for a seahorse. | 1.2000 | 0.04714 | 100 | 83 | 14 | 3 |
2298 | What can I say? I'm Middle-Aged? | 1.2000 | 0.04500 | 80 | 64 | 16 | 0 |
2299 | Our motto is, “ No job is too big or too small.” | 1.2000 | 0.04965 | 85 | 70 | 13 | 2 |
2300 | I informed the employment agency I wanted a job rescuing damsels in distress and this is where they sent me. | 1.2000 | 0.04134 | 115 | 94 | 19 | 2 |
2301 | Budget’s been tight. We had to downsize. | 1.2000 | 0.04965 | 85 | 70 | 13 | 2 |
2302 | The dry-fit version is on back order. | 1.2000 | 0.04714 | 100 | 83 | 14 | 3 |
2303 | How many lives have you saved? | 1.2000 | 0.05047 | 90 | 75 | 12 | 3 |
2304 | It’s not the size that matters | 1.2000 | 0.04569 | 105 | 87 | 15 | 3 |
2305 | Vows are vows | 1.2000 | 0.04839 | 80 | 65 | 14 | 1 |
2306 | Haven’t seen any dragon in a while | 1.2000 | 0.04766 | 105 | 88 | 13 | 4 |
2307 | better safe than sorry | 1.2000 | 0.05500 | 85 | 72 | 9 | 4 |
2308 | It's rated SPF 1000, but that doesn't take into account the lobster pot effect. | 1.1983 | 0.05081 | 116 | 101 | 7 | 8 |
2309 | I’ve been renting. | 1.1983 | 0.04101 | 116 | 95 | 19 | 2 |
2310 | You have to save me. I can't swim in this outfit. | 1.1982 | 0.04400 | 111 | 92 | 16 | 3 |
2311 | All can't be quiet forever on the Western Front! | 1.1982 | 0.04400 | 111 | 92 | 16 | 3 |
2312 | Once the moat is full I'm off duty. Wanna binge Baywatch again? | 1.1982 | 0.04011 | 111 | 90 | 20 | 1 |
2313 | I'm keeping the undocumented immigrants at bay. | 1.1981 | 0.04327 | 106 | 87 | 17 | 2 |
2314 | You have foiled my quest to seize the castle, Guardian of Life! | 1.1981 | 0.04724 | 106 | 89 | 13 | 4 |
2315 | I work for Sandcastle insurance! | 1.1981 | 0.04530 | 106 | 88 | 15 | 3 |
2316 | …so, yeah, first I learned to weld, took some lance-handling classes, then I got the job here. | 1.1981 | 0.04911 | 106 | 90 | 11 | 5 |
2317 | So you don't find this at all distressing? | 1.1980 | 0.03985 | 101 | 81 | 20 | 0 |
2318 | I'm being paid in thalers. | 1.1980 | 0.04671 | 101 | 84 | 14 | 3 |
2319 | We no longer can afford a real one. | 1.1980 | 0.04671 | 101 | 84 | 14 | 3 |
2320 | So... how do you kill your enemies with that circular weapon again? | 1.1980 | 0.04879 | 101 | 85 | 12 | 4 |
2321 | I couldn’t find Platform 9 and 3/4. You? | 1.1980 | 0.04454 | 101 | 83 | 16 | 2 |
2322 | I think I may have over dressed | 1.1980 | 0.04454 | 101 | 83 | 16 | 2 |
2323 | Hi Irene, my name's Rusty. | 1.1980 | 0.04671 | 101 | 84 | 14 | 3 |
2324 | Oh, I'm not a lifeguard. I'm waiting for my moat to fill up. | 1.1980 | 0.04454 | 101 | 83 | 16 | 2 |
2325 | Why do people think “knight swimming” is so exhilarating? | 1.1980 | 0.04879 | 101 | 85 | 12 | 4 |
2326 | Sunburn's a bitch. | 1.1979 | 0.05261 | 96 | 82 | 9 | 5 |
2327 | My kingdom for a seahorse | 1.1979 | 0.04826 | 96 | 80 | 13 | 3 |
2328 | In my day, we were forbidden to sit while on duty. | 1.1979 | 0.04826 | 96 | 80 | 13 | 3 |
2329 | I am here to protect my home and castle from those who threat our way way of life. What about you? | 1.1979 | 0.04826 | 96 | 80 | 13 | 3 |
2330 | No serfs will be 'up' while I'm on duty, I assure you. | 1.1979 | 0.04826 | 96 | 80 | 13 | 3 |
2331 | I used to be just like you, but now I have a castle to think about. | 1.1979 | 0.05048 | 96 | 81 | 11 | 4 |
2332 | So, when are the kids coming back? | 1.1979 | 0.04593 | 96 | 79 | 15 | 2 |
2333 | Just let me mansplain this for you... | 1.1978 | 0.04996 | 91 | 76 | 12 | 3 |
2334 | It took us forever to find an Airbnb with a large round table. | 1.1978 | 0.04996 | 91 | 76 | 12 | 3 |
2335 | I'm a little rusty until about the 4th of July - but it's great sunscreen. | 1.1978 | 0.04745 | 91 | 75 | 14 | 2 |
2336 | Good luck protecting your mote. | 1.1978 | 0.04745 | 91 | 75 | 14 | 2 |
2337 | You say futile, I say noble. | 1.1978 | 0.04480 | 91 | 74 | 16 | 1 |
2338 | I think my GPS hath taken me to the wrong castle. | 1.1978 | 0.04996 | 91 | 76 | 12 | 3 |
2339 | NO!!!! You're a dirty rascal. | 1.1978 | 0.04480 | 91 | 74 | 16 | 1 |
2340 | and you are the dirty rascal! | 1.1978 | 0.05682 | 91 | 79 | 6 | 6 |
2341 | Have you got any oil? | 1.1978 | 0.04480 | 91 | 74 | 16 | 1 |
2342 | He came, he saw, he swam. | 1.1977 | 0.04625 | 86 | 70 | 15 | 1 |
2343 | A horsefly, a horsefly! My kingdom for a horsefly!” | 1.1977 | 0.04625 | 86 | 70 | 15 | 1 |
2344 | My own kingdom isn’t bringing in as many coppers as it used to, so I’ve had to start moonknighting | 1.1977 | 0.04625 | 86 | 70 | 15 | 1 |
2345 | Do you think the moat is too much? | 1.1977 | 0.05183 | 86 | 72 | 11 | 3 |
2346 | What makes you think I'm on the defensive? | 1.1977 | 0.04912 | 86 | 71 | 13 | 2 |
2347 | I may have misunderstood what they meant by life GUARD. | 1.1975 | 0.05098 | 81 | 67 | 12 | 2 |
2348 | I'll take a shark attack over a mother who sees her kid's castle get stepped on. | 1.1975 | 0.04785 | 81 | 66 | 14 | 1 |
2349 | Well someone’s got to protect the castle … | 1.1975 | 0.05098 | 81 | 67 | 12 | 2 |
2350 | Mother said it was vulgar to own a beach house, I disagree | 1.1975 | 0.05098 | 81 | 67 | 12 | 2 |
2351 | Should I attempt to save someone I'd be in over my head. | 1.1975 | 0.04785 | 81 | 66 | 14 | 1 |
2352 | It's called "Gladiator: The Baywatch Years." Netflix seems to be quite interested. | 1.1974 | 0.05305 | 76 | 63 | 11 | 2 |
2353 | You can keep your eyes on the beach., but this castle is under the watch of Sir Finturf. | 1.1974 | 0.05626 | 76 | 64 | 9 | 3 |
2354 | Sand is my medium; castles my subject; the ocean my enemy; rust my hazard. | 1.1974 | 0.05626 | 76 | 64 | 9 | 3 |
2355 | So after the rest of the Knights of the Round Table voted me out,King Arthur re-assigned me here. | 1.1974 | 0.04963 | 76 | 62 | 13 | 1 |
2356 | It's not much of a castle, but the moat is unbelievable... | 1.1967 | 0.04299 | 122 | 102 | 16 | 4 |
2357 | I hate these out-of-town assignments. | 1.1964 | 0.03979 | 112 | 91 | 20 | 1 |
2358 | Have not ye heard the tale of Sir Gawain and the Green Algae? | 1.1963 | 0.04491 | 107 | 89 | 15 | 3 |
2359 | I just don't want to be another statistic, you know? | 1.1963 | 0.04491 | 107 | 89 | 15 | 3 |
2360 | It's embarrassing guarding a castle made by a six-year-old. | 1.1963 | 0.04290 | 107 | 88 | 17 | 2 |
2361 | If a dragon attacks, I’ll take it. If it’s a kraken, it’s yours. If it’s a kid, we’ll call it’s mom. | 1.1963 | 0.04491 | 107 | 89 | 15 | 3 |
2362 | In this world of cost-cutting layoffs, thanks to Private Equity leveraged buy-outs, you take what work you can get... | 1.1963 | 0.04868 | 107 | 91 | 11 | 5 |
2363 | I'm just waiting for them to lower the bridge. | 1.1961 | 0.05031 | 102 | 87 | 10 | 5 |
2364 | Are you free tonight? I get off at high tide.” | 1.1961 | 0.04629 | 102 | 85 | 14 | 3 |
2365 | That's got to be the biggest moat I've ever seen just beyond this castle. | 1.1961 | 0.04629 | 102 | 85 | 14 | 3 |
2366 | Can you pass me the sunscreen? | 1.1961 | 0.04415 | 102 | 84 | 16 | 2 |
2367 | My lance is no match to your whistle to get their attention. | 1.1961 | 0.04415 | 102 | 84 | 16 | 2 |
2368 | Is it pronounced “by-de-sea-a” or “boo-di-ca”? | 1.1961 | 0.05031 | 102 | 87 | 10 | 5 |
2369 | Do you sometimes feel life slipping away? | 1.1959 | 0.04780 | 97 | 81 | 13 | 3 |
2370 | That Dungeons and Dragons obsessed billionaire kid's family hired me. And you? | 1.1959 | 0.04780 | 97 | 81 | 13 | 3 |
2371 | My lady, the fortress will be breached by sunset. The time to act is now! | 1.1959 | 0.04051 | 97 | 78 | 19 | 0 |
2372 | I'm in charge of the beach for the next six hours | 1.1959 | 0.04308 | 97 | 79 | 17 | 1 |
2373 | I go off duty when the moat fills. | 1.1959 | 0.04780 | 97 | 81 | 13 | 3 |
2374 | You can't believe the cost of building moats... | 1.1959 | 0.04780 | 97 | 81 | 13 | 3 |
2375 | It’s a working vacation. | 1.1959 | 0.04780 | 97 | 81 | 13 | 3 |
2376 | If we have to go in bring the WD-40. | 1.1957 | 0.04698 | 92 | 76 | 14 | 2 |
2377 | Shark Duty | 1.1957 | 0.04946 | 92 | 77 | 12 | 3 |
2378 | Might you have surplus rustscreen you could spare?" | 1.1957 | 0.04698 | 92 | 76 | 14 | 2 |
2379 | It' looks like sand,but it's made of "armortec" | 1.1957 | 0.05407 | 92 | 79 | 8 | 5 |
2380 | Kids these days have no idea how to defend a shoreline outpost. I blame that Ticky Tock. | 1.1957 | 0.04946 | 92 | 77 | 12 | 3 |
2381 | Too hot to conquer the castle today | 1.1957 | 0.04698 | 92 | 76 | 14 | 2 |
2382 | When are the enemies coming? | 1.1957 | 0.04437 | 92 | 75 | 16 | 1 |
2383 | NATO watching over Ukraine | 1.1957 | 0.05182 | 92 | 78 | 10 | 4 |
2384 | The hours are OK, but it's the benefits that keep me in the suit | 1.1957 | 0.04159 | 92 | 74 | 18 | 0 |
2385 | I took this entry level position guarding the King’s sandcastle. If I’m successful he said I probably won’t get beheaded. Still better than working at Walmart. | 1.1957 | 0.05182 | 92 | 78 | 10 | 4 |
2386 | It's all I could afford | 1.1954 | 0.04861 | 87 | 72 | 13 | 2 |
2387 | It's quite a different story if we're ebbing or flowing. | 1.1954 | 0.04861 | 87 | 72 | 13 | 2 |
2388 | As a matter of fact, yes, every knight swears an oath to protect all castles, big & small. | 1.1954 | 0.05626 | 87 | 75 | 7 | 5 |
2389 | Defending property saves lives. | 1.1954 | 0.04578 | 87 | 71 | 15 | 1 |
2390 | Will you spot me in the event? I’m thinking I might rust, or sink. | 1.1954 | 0.04276 | 87 | 70 | 17 | 0 |
2391 | I suppose if you put it that way, I'm a Lifeguard too. | 1.1954 | 0.04276 | 87 | 70 | 17 | 0 |
2392 | Once upon a time… | 1.1954 | 0.04861 | 87 | 72 | 13 | 2 |
2393 | A castle’s a castle... | 1.1954 | 0.04578 | 87 | 71 | 15 | 1 |
2394 | Who has better sun protection | 1.1954 | 0.04578 | 87 | 71 | 15 | 1 |
2395 | Is this a sun protection thing or a castle protection thing? | 1.1951 | 0.05041 | 82 | 68 | 12 | 2 |
2396 | My shift here is over when the tide comes in. | 1.1951 | 0.05869 | 82 | 71 | 6 | 5 |
2397 | Oh, I've had worse jobs. It's murder on my tan, though. | 1.1951 | 0.05607 | 82 | 70 | 8 | 4 |
2398 | I'm on guard duty protecting the sand castle from looters. | 1.1951 | 0.05331 | 82 | 69 | 10 | 3 |
2399 | You usually try to get all the bathroom needs before it goes on. | 1.1951 | 0.05607 | 82 | 70 | 8 | 4 |
2400 | So, the castle will fall apart and we will be here watching, the job is pretty much that. | 1.1951 | 0.05331 | 82 | 69 | 10 | 3 |
2401 | Don’t worry. In this economy, lots of people have had to downgrade. | 1.1951 | 0.04733 | 82 | 67 | 14 | 1 |
2402 | I’ll take the night shift. | 1.1949 | 0.04383 | 118 | 99 | 15 | 4 |
2403 | I am sworn to protect this kingdom until high tide. | 1.1949 | 0.04545 | 118 | 100 | 13 | 5 |
2404 | You don't take your job very seriously, do you? | 1.1948 | 0.06142 | 77 | 67 | 5 | 5 |
2405 | This downsizing is rough. | 1.1948 | 0.05242 | 77 | 64 | 11 | 2 |
2406 | I built it so people wouldn't ask so many questions. | 1.1948 | 0.05558 | 77 | 65 | 9 | 3 |
2407 | I got fired for wearing this at White Castle, so this job just made more sense!! | 1.1948 | 0.05242 | 77 | 64 | 11 | 2 |
2408 | We will vanish with time and tide. | 1.1948 | 0.05558 | 77 | 65 | 9 | 3 |
2409 | I know a thing or two about how empires are defeated. | 1.1948 | 0.04905 | 77 | 63 | 13 | 1 |
2410 | My glasses broke and I thought the application said, "fiefguard." | 1.1948 | 0.04905 | 77 | 63 | 13 | 1 |
2411 | Yes, I have been accused of helicopter parenting | 1.1948 | 0.05242 | 77 | 64 | 11 | 2 |
2412 | I thought he said “En Garde”. | 1.1948 | 0.05857 | 77 | 66 | 7 | 4 |
2413 | I think the moat gives it pastiche, don't you? | 1.1947 | 0.04329 | 113 | 94 | 16 | 3 |
2414 | Guess I was demoted | 1.1947 | 0.04680 | 113 | 96 | 12 | 5 |
2415 | And that's where I draw the line in the sand | 1.1947 | 0.04329 | 113 | 94 | 16 | 3 |
2416 | It’s a union thing | 1.1947 | 0.04508 | 113 | 95 | 14 | 4 |
2417 | Look, lady. You do what you gotta do. I’ll do what I gotta do. That’s all there is to it. Take a deep breath and relax. | 1.1944 | 0.04643 | 108 | 91 | 13 | 4 |
2418 | It’s a moat point | 1.1944 | 0.05814 | 72 | 61 | 8 | 3 |
2419 | King Canute is on a bathroom break" | 1.1944 | 0.05814 | 72 | 61 | 8 | 3 |
2420 | I'm interested in an authentic presence up here. | 1.1944 | 0.04826 | 108 | 92 | 11 | 5 |
2421 | Oh dear,the scale was off again. | 1.1944 | 0.04453 | 108 | 90 | 15 | 3 |
2422 | The Defending The Realm business is tough these days | 1.1942 | 0.04588 | 103 | 86 | 14 | 3 |
2423 | I’ll cover the moat, you cover the ocean | 1.1942 | 0.04153 | 103 | 84 | 18 | 1 |
2424 | Does the concession stand have mead? | 1.1942 | 0.04791 | 103 | 87 | 12 | 4 |
2425 | Where a castle needs guarding, I go. | 1.1942 | 0.04791 | 103 | 87 | 12 | 4 |
2426 | It’s small but still functional. | 1.1942 | 0.04153 | 103 | 84 | 18 | 1 |
2427 | Yeah being a castle guard is tough but this one is Tom Cruise’s. | 1.1942 | 0.04791 | 103 | 87 | 12 | 4 |
2428 | I know, but I still use SPF 30 just to be safe. | 1.1939 | 0.04268 | 98 | 80 | 17 | 1 |
2429 | It's just a temp position. | 1.1939 | 0.04014 | 98 | 79 | 19 | 0 |
2430 | Your castle is so sick. My castle isn’t nearly as cool as your castle. | 1.1939 | 0.05161 | 98 | 84 | 9 | 5 |
2431 | I’m covering the knight shift. | 1.1939 | 0.04508 | 98 | 81 | 15 | 2 |
2432 | It's hot as all get-out, but it's SPF 1066. | 1.1939 | 0.04508 | 98 | 81 | 15 | 2 |
2433 | Since I can't swim, this is the only job on the beach. | 1.1939 | 0.04735 | 98 | 82 | 13 | 3 |
2434 | You’d be surprised how few people see my job as pointless. | 1.1939 | 0.04735 | 98 | 82 | 13 | 3 |
2435 | The moat is all mine. | 1.1939 | 0.04014 | 98 | 79 | 19 | 0 |
2436 | Excuse me, milady, hast thou seen any dragonflies?... | 1.1939 | 0.04508 | 98 | 81 | 15 | 2 |
2437 | You rescue the swimmers in trouble; I’ll protect the castle. | 1.1939 | 0.04735 | 98 | 82 | 13 | 3 |
2438 | This is my first time working for a billionaire. You? | 1.1935 | 0.04394 | 93 | 76 | 16 | 1 |
2439 | The king told me told to guard the castle while he boogie boards. | 1.1935 | 0.04652 | 93 | 77 | 14 | 2 |
2440 | They were out of stock on sunscreen. | 1.1935 | 0.04897 | 93 | 78 | 12 | 3 |
2441 | Oh you meant night shift | 1.1935 | 0.04897 | 93 | 78 | 12 | 3 |
2442 | So, we elevated the house and added French drains | 1.1935 | 0.04394 | 93 | 76 | 16 | 1 |
2443 | I repose only because me thinks the mote will hold. | 1.1935 | 0.04897 | 93 | 78 | 12 | 3 |
2444 | The tide is coming. | 1.1933 | 0.04182 | 119 | 99 | 17 | 3 |
2445 | They said go guard the castle. | 1.1933 | 0.04182 | 119 | 99 | 17 | 3 |
2446 | This motherfucker… | 1.1932 | 0.05075 | 88 | 74 | 11 | 3 |
2447 | Would you mind keeping an eye on the Shire while I run off for a few moments and uh, slay a dragon? | 1.1932 | 0.05326 | 88 | 75 | 9 | 4 |
2448 | After you train me, I'm on the Knight Shift. | 1.1932 | 0.04531 | 88 | 72 | 15 | 1 |
2449 | You guys on day shift sure take a more relaxed approach to guarding the castle. | 1.1932 | 0.04531 | 88 | 72 | 15 | 1 |
2450 | I’m the knight guard. My job is to guard the sandcastle. | 1.1932 | 0.05075 | 88 | 74 | 11 | 3 |
2451 | My dermatologist said I needed to use the strongest protection available. This is SPF 1,000,000. | 1.1932 | 0.04531 | 88 | 72 | 15 | 1 |
2452 | If you lend me your suntan oil, I’ll scratch your back with my spear. | 1.1932 | 0.04531 | 88 | 72 | 15 | 1 |
2453 | Just so we're clear, my duties do not extend beyond the moat. | 1.1932 | 0.04531 | 88 | 72 | 15 | 1 |
2454 | I get off at high tide. Want to go for a tankard of mead? | 1.1932 | 0.04810 | 88 | 73 | 13 | 2 |
2455 | Just let me know if you're in distress. | 1.1932 | 0.04233 | 88 | 71 | 17 | 0 |
2456 | I enjoy jousting high tides instead of windmills. | 1.1930 | 0.04109 | 114 | 94 | 18 | 2 |
2457 | I’ll be out of a job in an hour. | 1.1930 | 0.04806 | 114 | 98 | 10 | 6 |
2458 | I'm certified too. | 1.1928 | 0.04985 | 83 | 69 | 12 | 2 |
2459 | Fair lady, are you sure this isn’t station XXVI? | 1.1928 | 0.04681 | 83 | 68 | 14 | 1 |
2460 | You know there's no water in that moat,don't you? | 1.1928 | 0.04681 | 83 | 68 | 14 | 1 |
2461 | I’ll be ready for high tide this time. | 1.1928 | 0.04681 | 83 | 68 | 14 | 1 |
2462 | Be wary of all horses, wooden or inflatable. | 1.1928 | 0.04985 | 83 | 69 | 12 | 2 |
2463 | You may be one of the beach "life" guards, but I'm the King's only castle guard. | 1.1928 | 0.04985 | 83 | 69 | 12 | 2 |
2464 | Ah,dang! You got a whistle? | 1.1928 | 0.04985 | 83 | 69 | 12 | 2 |
2465 | I've added a bit of staging to go with my medieval sun screen | 1.1928 | 0.05272 | 83 | 70 | 10 | 3 |
2466 | Mine’s bigger. | 1.1928 | 0.04681 | 83 | 68 | 14 | 1 |
2467 | Sink or swim, I’m guarding this place. | 1.1927 | 0.04604 | 109 | 92 | 13 | 4 |
2468 | Yes, I suppose your way gives better protection against skin cancer. | 1.1927 | 0.04219 | 109 | 90 | 17 | 2 |
2469 | This is your first warning. | 1.1927 | 0.04785 | 109 | 93 | 11 | 5 |
2470 | The moat will not be breached on my watch! | 1.1927 | 0.04785 | 109 | 93 | 11 | 5 |
2471 | I’d like to date you, but I like Lance a lot. | 1.1927 | 0.04785 | 109 | 93 | 11 | 5 |
2472 | How are your benefits? | 1.1927 | 0.04416 | 109 | 91 | 15 | 3 |
2473 | On-the-job training. | 1.1923 | 0.04491 | 78 | 63 | 15 | 0 |
2474 | Since when is it chain mail optional? | 1.1923 | 0.05180 | 78 | 65 | 11 | 2 |
2475 | Tanya, every castle needs a guard. Don't look at me like this is crazy. | 1.1923 | 0.05180 | 78 | 65 | 11 | 2 |
2476 | You guard lives? No way, I guard castles! | 1.1923 | 0.04848 | 78 | 64 | 13 | 1 |
2477 | On a positive note, I don’t get sunburned. | 1.1923 | 0.05180 | 78 | 65 | 11 | 2 |
2478 | I know it's my turn to rescue, but I'm in a suit of armor | 1.1919 | 0.04466 | 99 | 82 | 15 | 2 |
2479 | My king has taken a leave to go splish-splash. | 1.1919 | 0.04466 | 99 | 82 | 15 | 2 |
2480 | No worries…I got this! | 1.1919 | 0.04691 | 99 | 83 | 13 | 3 |
2481 | Creating a memory! | 1.1919 | 0.04466 | 99 | 82 | 15 | 2 |
2482 | When I run on the beach, I worry my armor jiggles too much. | 1.1919 | 0.04691 | 99 | 83 | 13 | 3 |
2483 | I’m a Medieval English Lit major. You?” | 1.1919 | 0.04691 | 99 | 83 | 13 | 3 |
2484 | I’ll be leaving as soon as the tide comes in! | 1.1919 | 0.04229 | 99 | 81 | 17 | 1 |
2485 | You guard the beach, I'll guard the castle. | 1.1919 | 0.04229 | 99 | 81 | 17 | 1 |
2486 | I heard there were shark sightings | 1.1919 | 0.03978 | 99 | 80 | 19 | 0 |
2487 | The pay is great, but the constant rebuilding is a pain in the ass. | 1.1919 | 0.04466 | 99 | 82 | 15 | 2 |
2488 | A fair maiden needs a knight in shining armor, and lots of sunblock. | 1.1919 | 0.04466 | 99 | 82 | 15 | 2 |
2489 | Safety’s first. Am I right? | 1.1919 | 0.04229 | 99 | 81 | 17 | 1 |
2490 | Every summer I wait here to defend the beach against the white walkers from the United Kingdom. | 1.1919 | 0.04691 | 99 | 83 | 13 | 3 |
2491 | Might thou have an extra Floatie? | 1.1918 | 0.04640 | 73 | 59 | 14 | 0 |
2492 | It protects me from the sun - rust is the problem. | 1.1915 | 0.04351 | 94 | 77 | 16 | 1 |
2493 | I might need rescuing after the moat is filled. | 1.1915 | 0.04607 | 94 | 78 | 14 | 2 |
2494 | You take care of your area and I'll take care of mine. | 1.1915 | 0.04849 | 94 | 79 | 12 | 3 |
2495 | It’s actually hysterical, but you had to be there. | 1.1915 | 0.04351 | 94 | 77 | 16 | 1 |
2496 | I swear the ad said, "Knight Watchman" | 1.1915 | 0.05079 | 94 | 80 | 10 | 4 |
2497 | For you it's a day job, for me it's a knight job. | 1.1915 | 0.05079 | 94 | 80 | 10 | 4 |
2498 | Our job is, if we see a sand crab we save the sand crab | 1.1915 | 0.04607 | 94 | 78 | 14 | 2 |
2499 | My family takes the building and defense of sandcastles very seriously." | 1.1915 | 0.04607 | 94 | 78 | 14 | 2 |
2500 | Are going to just sit there, or are you going to defend it? | 1.1915 | 0.04607 | 94 | 78 | 14 | 2 |
2501 | Moat, shmoat. | 1.1915 | 0.04351 | 94 | 77 | 16 | 1 |
2502 | Sure it's impractical for swimming, but hey, SPF 10,000! | 1.1915 | 0.04351 | 94 | 77 | 16 | 1 |
2503 | And so, I took this job when the horse went lame." | 1.1915 | 0.04351 | 94 | 77 | 16 | 1 |
2504 | So yeah I told them I had IBS and that’s why they wouldn’t hire me at the pool which honestly I think I could file a suit. | 1.1915 | 0.05079 | 94 | 80 | 10 | 4 |
2505 | I was certified by the king himself, thank you very much! | 1.1915 | 0.05079 | 94 | 80 | 10 | 4 |
2506 | How does this sound for my Tinder profile?: I live in a tiny house and take SPF protection very seriously. | 1.1910 | 0.04485 | 89 | 73 | 15 | 1 |
2507 | And since when exactly is sunscreen considered a weapon of defense? | 1.1910 | 0.05022 | 89 | 75 | 11 | 3 |
2508 | What… is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow? | 1.1910 | 0.04485 | 89 | 73 | 15 | 1 |
2509 | ...because the dragon told me this is where we would face off. | 1.1910 | 0.04761 | 89 | 74 | 13 | 2 |
2510 | THE MOAT HAS A NASTY RIPTIDE | 1.1910 | 0.04485 | 89 | 73 | 15 | 1 |
2511 | You do your swim save thing, I got the sand castles. | 1.1910 | 0.05270 | 89 | 76 | 9 | 4 |
2512 | Behold, a damsel in a tower! A quest is upon us! | 1.1910 | 0.04485 | 89 | 73 | 15 | 1 |
2513 | You think I could SWIM in this armor? Not in my job description. Just guarding the castle. The swimmers are yours. | 1.1910 | 0.05022 | 89 | 75 | 11 | 3 |
2514 | I’m not trying to upstage you, I’m out of sunscreen. | 1.1910 | 0.04485 | 89 | 73 | 15 | 1 |
2515 | Well, someone has to protect the castle! | 1.1910 | 0.05022 | 89 | 75 | 11 | 3 |
2516 | Gives me something to do while I'm waiting for someone to drown. | 1.1910 | 0.05022 | 89 | 75 | 11 | 3 |
2517 | You should really start taking UV protection seriously | 1.1910 | 0.04485 | 89 | 73 | 15 | 1 |
2518 | So think of this, but 10x bigger and not made out of sand, that’s what I protected | 1.1909 | 0.03980 | 110 | 90 | 19 | 1 |
2519 | When I do something, I'm all in. | 1.1905 | 0.04300 | 105 | 87 | 16 | 2 |
2520 | On second thought, maybe you help drowning swimmers and I'll handle the dragons. | 1.1905 | 0.04707 | 105 | 89 | 12 | 4 |
2521 | My knight shift ends when the tide rolls in. | 1.1905 | 0.04931 | 84 | 70 | 12 | 2 |
2522 | Sun block. Never use the stuff. | 1.1905 | 0.04631 | 84 | 69 | 14 | 1 |
2523 | I'm a middle aged parent, but my kids took it one step too far. | 1.1905 | 0.04931 | 84 | 70 | 12 | 2 |
2524 | I pledge to guard this castle with my life, however, once the temperature hits 80 degrees I'm out. | 1.1905 | 0.05214 | 84 | 71 | 10 | 3 |
2525 | I'm only here until high tide. | 1.1905 | 0.04931 | 84 | 70 | 12 | 2 |
2526 | Do you know where we can find a tiny horse? | 1.1905 | 0.04931 | 84 | 70 | 12 | 2 |
2527 | Do you mind doing the rescues today? I'm a little rusty" | 1.1905 | 0.04631 | 84 | 69 | 14 | 1 |
2528 | I belong to a private military contractor hired to guard this castle. | 1.1905 | 0.04931 | 84 | 70 | 12 | 2 |
2529 | It just helps me feel more "at home." | 1.1905 | 0.04508 | 105 | 88 | 14 | 3 |
2530 | Can you spare a bit coin or two? | 1.1905 | 0.04897 | 105 | 90 | 10 | 5 |
2531 | You saw what happened in Ukraine. | 1.1905 | 0.04931 | 84 | 70 | 12 | 2 |
2532 | I focused more on the castle. | 1.1905 | 0.04931 | 84 | 70 | 12 | 2 |
2533 | Knights in shining armor need to be trained for all kinds of rescues. | 1.1905 | 0.03857 | 126 | 104 | 20 | 2 |
2534 | I SAID I NEEDED SOMEONE FROM DAY WATCH!?? | 1.1905 | 0.04931 | 84 | 70 | 12 | 2 |
2535 | Ever since coronavirus shut down the Renaissance Fair, I feel like I’m just a shadow of my former self. | 1.1905 | 0.04300 | 105 | 87 | 16 | 2 |
2536 | I'm cooking like a cake in this armor, I have rashes in places you wouldn't even believe, and my ex-wife left me with nothing except this sand castle. | 1.1901 | 0.04282 | 121 | 102 | 15 | 4 |
2537 | Please don't blow the whistle on our Trojan Horse plan. | 1.1900 | 0.05064 | 100 | 86 | 9 | 5 |
2538 | Tell me again what happens when the tide comes in, | 1.1900 | 0.04426 | 100 | 83 | 15 | 2 |
2539 | Sir Seashell and Lady Boss | 1.1900 | 0.04426 | 100 | 83 | 15 | 2 |
2540 | And thou art a fair damsel. | 1.1900 | 0.05064 | 100 | 86 | 9 | 5 |
2541 | You take the high tide and I’ll take the low tide and can we meet again tomorrow | 1.1900 | 0.04648 | 100 | 84 | 13 | 3 |
2542 | The dragon is full-size. | 1.1900 | 0.04861 | 100 | 85 | 11 | 4 |
2543 | When another day at the beach turns into knight. | 1.1900 | 0.05260 | 100 | 87 | 7 | 6 |
2544 | You are in charge of the moat. | 1.1899 | 0.05120 | 79 | 66 | 11 | 2 |
2545 | Ha! I'll bet tide waits for this man! | 1.1899 | 0.04792 | 79 | 65 | 13 | 1 |
2546 | It was important to me to find a purpose beyond just “saving lives” | 1.1899 | 0.04792 | 79 | 65 | 13 | 1 |
2547 | Do you mind if I move over a few generations? | 1.1899 | 0.05428 | 79 | 67 | 9 | 3 |
2548 | I sometimes sense vague yet perceptible signs that my very way of life is threatened | 1.1899 | 0.04792 | 79 | 65 | 13 | 1 |
2549 | We are the knights who say “no swimming until an hour after eating!” | 1.1899 | 0.04792 | 79 | 65 | 13 | 1 |
2550 | My dermatologist recommends complete protection." | 1.1899 | 0.05428 | 79 | 67 | 9 | 3 |
2551 | I have sworn an oath to protect the castle. You watch the swimmers. | 1.1899 | 0.05120 | 79 | 66 | 11 | 2 |
2552 | Were you duped by a horse too? | 1.1899 | 0.04441 | 79 | 64 | 15 | 0 |
2553 | My prankster friend said lifeguards at the Renaissance Faire always wear armor. | 1.1895 | 0.04563 | 95 | 79 | 14 | 2 |
2554 | Waiting for Putin. | 1.1895 | 0.04563 | 95 | 79 | 14 | 2 |
2555 | Get with the program! | 1.1895 | 0.04563 | 95 | 79 | 14 | 2 |
2556 | It’s my final day of training and I’ll either sink or swim. | 1.1895 | 0.05247 | 95 | 82 | 8 | 5 |
2557 | Lifeguard or not, you won't be getting past that moat. | 1.1895 | 0.04310 | 95 | 78 | 16 | 1 |
2558 | The main door is a weak point, we need to teach these kids defensive fortification. | 1.1895 | 0.04802 | 95 | 80 | 12 | 3 |
2559 | I may be old-fashioned but I am not delusional. | 1.1895 | 0.05030 | 95 | 81 | 10 | 4 |
2560 | In my experience, there's only dragons at low tide. | 1.1895 | 0.04802 | 95 | 80 | 12 | 3 |
2561 | I totally misunderstood when they asked me to work the night shift. | 1.1895 | 0.04802 | 95 | 80 | 12 | 3 |
2562 | I identify as Lilliputian. | 1.1895 | 0.05030 | 95 | 81 | 10 | 4 |
2563 | Sea levels are rising but we are not going to retreat without a fight! | 1.1892 | 0.04343 | 111 | 93 | 15 | 3 |
2564 | Hi I’m the new night guard | 1.1892 | 0.04527 | 111 | 94 | 13 | 4 |
2565 | Got any sunscreen? | 1.1892 | 0.04527 | 111 | 94 | 13 | 4 |
2566 | Money doesn’t go as far in California, but at least it’s on the beach. | 1.1892 | 0.05331 | 74 | 62 | 10 | 2 |
2567 | Stop worrying. The moat will save your damn little castle | 1.1892 | 0.04971 | 74 | 61 | 12 | 1 |
2568 | Geez, here we go again; seems this ocean lays siege to my castle maybe twice EVERY day! | 1.1892 | 0.04971 | 74 | 61 | 12 | 1 |
2569 | ...and I will defend me-lady's honor, at least until the tide comes in. | 1.1889 | 0.04440 | 90 | 74 | 15 | 1 |
2570 | .....no dragons but The Knights of Mrs. Carter's 2nd grade field trip nearly destroyed the whole kingdom on Monday | 1.1889 | 0.04713 | 90 | 75 | 13 | 2 |
2571 | The Crusade lasted longer than anyone expected, so I had to take a summer job.. | 1.1889 | 0.04440 | 90 | 74 | 15 | 1 |
2572 | Zero security threats to report, since I took over. | 1.1889 | 0.04440 | 90 | 74 | 15 | 1 |
2573 | No, no I am NOT overcompensating for being downsized. | 1.1889 | 0.04970 | 90 | 76 | 11 | 3 |
2574 | Who needs sunscreen when you've got armor!? | 1.1889 | 0.04713 | 90 | 75 | 13 | 2 |
2575 | Waterfront property is really hard to come by these days | 1.1889 | 0.04970 | 90 | 76 | 11 | 3 |
2576 | Sure it’s a little hot but you can’t beat it for protection. | 1.1889 | 0.04440 | 90 | 74 | 15 | 1 |
2577 | The memo said proper Jubilee attire for all government employees | 1.1887 | 0.04469 | 106 | 89 | 14 | 3 |
2578 | Yes, she's an only child. | 1.1884 | 0.05172 | 69 | 57 | 11 | 1 |
2579 | Yes, I’m moat certified. | 1.1882 | 0.04878 | 85 | 71 | 12 | 2 |
2580 | I used to be into body surfing the 40 foot waves. | 1.1882 | 0.04582 | 85 | 70 | 14 | 1 |
2581 | I warn you... | 1.1882 | 0.04878 | 85 | 71 | 12 | 2 |
2582 | First time working the knight shift? | 1.1882 | 0.04878 | 85 | 71 | 12 | 2 |
2583 | My other castle's in the air. | 1.1882 | 0.05157 | 85 | 72 | 10 | 3 |
2584 | I'm funded though he Defense Department. No one looks very closely at anything over there." | 1.1882 | 0.04582 | 85 | 70 | 14 | 1 |
2585 | Listen...if your name wasn't Gywn, I wouldn't have gone to all they trouble! | 1.1882 | 0.04582 | 85 | 70 | 14 | 1 |
2586 | It’s high tide there is a changing of the guard | 1.1882 | 0.04878 | 85 | 71 | 12 | 2 |
2587 | Dost thou not fearest the sun will mar thy fair lady's complexion? | 1.1882 | 0.05422 | 85 | 73 | 8 | 4 |
2588 | I'm gonna take a bathroom break, will you be ok guarding the castle by yourself? | 1.1882 | 0.05157 | 85 | 72 | 10 | 3 |
2589 | Don't worry, I'm not going swimming. | 1.1882 | 0.04582 | 85 | 70 | 14 | 1 |
2590 | I just went with SPF 50. | 1.1882 | 0.04265 | 85 | 69 | 16 | 0 |
2591 | I really feel I add a sense of ambiance to the Airbnb experience. | 1.1881 | 0.04816 | 101 | 86 | 11 | 4 |
2592 | They thought he needed some time by the water. | 1.1881 | 0.04154 | 101 | 83 | 17 | 1 |
2593 | You handle the ocean, I'll handle the moat. | 1.1880 | 0.04193 | 117 | 98 | 16 | 3 |
2594 | One of us is psychotic. | 1.1875 | 0.04981 | 96 | 82 | 10 | 4 |
2595 | My shift ends at high tide. | 1.1875 | 0.04738 | 80 | 66 | 13 | 1 |
2596 | Did I miss the memo about 'Casual Fridays'? | 1.1875 | 0.05652 | 80 | 69 | 7 | 4 |
2597 | I love everything about this job except for the tan lines. | 1.1875 | 0.04005 | 96 | 78 | 18 | 0 |
2598 | Beats sunscreen. | 1.1875 | 0.04391 | 80 | 65 | 15 | 0 |
2599 | Stay on your side and we won't have any problems. | 1.1875 | 0.05061 | 80 | 67 | 11 | 2 |
2600 | you just worry about the water, I've got the shore | 1.1875 | 0.05061 | 80 | 67 | 11 | 2 |
2601 | No sunscreen but it gets steamy. | 1.1875 | 0.04270 | 96 | 79 | 16 | 1 |
2602 | Hey, Cutie. I’m your knight in shining armor. | 1.1875 | 0.04270 | 96 | 79 | 16 | 1 |
2603 | Pardon me, but do you happen to have any sunscreen? | 1.1875 | 0.05061 | 80 | 67 | 11 | 2 |
2604 | I’m on duty until the tide rises. | 1.1875 | 0.04738 | 80 | 66 | 13 | 1 |
2605 | That movie from the 70's, Jaws, really did a number on me! | 1.1875 | 0.04981 | 96 | 82 | 10 | 4 |
2606 | Your fantasy of finding a ‘knight in shining armor’ is about as realistic as building ‘castles in the sand’ | 1.1875 | 0.05061 | 80 | 67 | 11 | 2 |
2607 | As soon as you're off duty, I'm attacking. | 1.1875 | 0.04738 | 80 | 66 | 13 | 1 |
2608 | If a storm erupts, you clear the beach and I’ll protect the castle. | 1.1875 | 0.04005 | 96 | 78 | 18 | 0 |
2609 | And I told them, you'll always be employable as a medievalist. | 1.1875 | 0.05061 | 80 | 67 | 11 | 2 |
2610 | I'm waiting for the tiny catapults. | 1.1875 | 0.05061 | 80 | 67 | 11 | 2 |
2611 | I juggle between king’s guard and lifeguard | 1.1875 | 0.04738 | 80 | 66 | 13 | 1 |
2612 | It's an alternative architectural feature that I call "the dry moat". It keeps my dungeons from seeping. | 1.1870 | 0.03889 | 123 | 102 | 19 | 2 |
2613 | Well. it is better than building 'castles in the air'! | 1.1869 | 0.04812 | 107 | 92 | 10 | 5 |
2614 | That bully isn’t gonna get me this time. | 1.1869 | 0.04430 | 107 | 90 | 14 | 3 |
2615 | I guess we will not sail to Byzantium after all. | 1.1868 | 0.04665 | 91 | 76 | 13 | 2 |
2616 | I'll be fine until the tide comes in. | 1.1868 | 0.04396 | 91 | 75 | 15 | 1 |
2617 | Forsooth my armour precludes my saving souls from the sea but withal methinks I make fine castles | 1.1868 | 0.04665 | 91 | 76 | 13 | 2 |
2618 | I heard you needed protection from the sun. | 1.1868 | 0.04920 | 91 | 77 | 11 | 3 |
2619 | I'm not certified for ocean rescue, so I'll guard the moat. | 1.1868 | 0.04920 | 91 | 77 | 11 | 3 |
2620 | You don't think the moat is enough? | 1.1868 | 0.04665 | 91 | 76 | 13 | 2 |
2621 | They tell me your mother was a hamster? | 1.1868 | 0.04665 | 91 | 76 | 13 | 2 |
2622 | All the guards call it 'Castle Sisyphus.' | 1.1867 | 0.05265 | 75 | 63 | 10 | 2 |
2623 | Are you into jousting? | 1.1867 | 0.04530 | 75 | 61 | 14 | 0 |
2624 | SPF 350. How about yours? | 1.1867 | 0.04530 | 75 | 61 | 14 | 0 |
2625 | You're a good dad, Sir. | 1.1867 | 0.04911 | 75 | 62 | 12 | 1 |
2626 | I'm to alert my kids if rising sea level poses a threat. | 1.1867 | 0.05597 | 75 | 64 | 8 | 3 |
2627 | So, how do you handle the whole going in the water with a suit of armor on thing? | 1.1863 | 0.04772 | 102 | 87 | 11 | 4 |
2628 | You don't exactly look prepared for Armageddon. | 1.1863 | 0.04117 | 102 | 84 | 17 | 1 |
2629 | I am the Keeper of the Castle. So what’s your title? | 1.1863 | 0.04564 | 102 | 86 | 13 | 3 |
2630 | I misread the help wanted ad. Thought they wanted someone for the courtyard! | 1.1863 | 0.04117 | 102 | 84 | 17 | 1 |
2631 | I'm waiting for the Queen's eightieth jubilee. | 1.1863 | 0.04346 | 102 | 85 | 15 | 2 |
2632 | 'Guard' was in the job description | 1.1863 | 0.04971 | 102 | 88 | 9 | 5 |
2633 | If they don’t build that wall soon, I may be out of a job. | 1.1860 | 0.05363 | 86 | 74 | 8 | 4 |
2634 | Well actually, it's even more secure than blockchain mail | 1.1860 | 0.04826 | 86 | 72 | 12 | 2 |
2635 | I'm counting on the moat. I can't move | 1.1860 | 0.05363 | 86 | 74 | 8 | 4 |
2636 | If they come by sea, stand behind me. | 1.1860 | 0.04221 | 86 | 70 | 16 | 0 |
2637 | You don't look like a damsel in distress. | 1.1860 | 0.04826 | 86 | 72 | 12 | 2 |
2638 | It's a pretty sweet summer gig, if you don't mind tan lines. | 1.1860 | 0.04533 | 86 | 71 | 14 | 1 |
2639 | I think that I may be in the wrong cartoon! | 1.1860 | 0.05101 | 86 | 73 | 10 | 3 |
2640 | What? I’ve got my shift at Medieval Times after this. | 1.1860 | 0.03775 | 129 | 107 | 20 | 2 |
2641 | I came in last at the swim trials. | 1.1860 | 0.04826 | 86 | 72 | 12 | 2 |
2642 | I fear for my lady the castle will be overrun. | 1.1860 | 0.05363 | 86 | 74 | 8 | 4 |
2643 | They won't open the drawbridge for you. | 1.1856 | 0.04710 | 97 | 82 | 12 | 3 |
2644 | I’m going to take it when the tide goes out. | 1.1856 | 0.04933 | 97 | 83 | 10 | 4 |
2645 | did not they teach you about draw bridges in school? | 1.1856 | 0.04476 | 97 | 81 | 14 | 2 |
2646 | Chivalry never dies. | 1.1852 | 0.05586 | 81 | 70 | 7 | 4 |
2647 | Yes, I’ve got plenty of experience guarding lives. | 1.1852 | 0.04685 | 81 | 67 | 13 | 1 |
2648 | I’ll watch the moat, you take the lake. | 1.1852 | 0.05003 | 81 | 68 | 11 | 2 |
2649 | And, this is why millennials get a bad name. Where do your priorities lie? | 1.1852 | 0.05003 | 81 | 68 | 11 | 2 |
2650 | Not exactly what I expected, but, hey, it's a paycheck." | 1.1852 | 0.04343 | 81 | 66 | 15 | 0 |
2651 | Your dentist ordered a knight guard. | 1.1852 | 0.04685 | 81 | 67 | 13 | 1 |
2652 | You got any zinc oxide? | 1.1852 | 0.05303 | 81 | 69 | 9 | 3 |
2653 | I have really faire skin - and this suit is SPF circa 1200. | 1.1852 | 0.04685 | 81 | 67 | 13 | 1 |
2654 | My greatest fear for our kingdom is high tide. | 1.1852 | 0.04343 | 81 | 66 | 15 | 0 |
2655 | I was told to do the knight shift | 1.1852 | 0.04393 | 108 | 91 | 14 | 3 |
2656 | I’ll protect my realm, you take care of yours. | 1.1852 | 0.05003 | 81 | 68 | 11 | 2 |
2657 | Sunblock is for amateurs. | 1.1852 | 0.04343 | 81 | 66 | 15 | 0 |
2658 | In "Lifeguard Class", they taught us never to attempt a rescue of someone bigger than us or anyone wearing armor. | 1.1848 | 0.04619 | 92 | 77 | 13 | 2 |
2659 | You know what keeps me up at night? Hurricanes and tsunamis. | 1.1848 | 0.04352 | 92 | 76 | 15 | 1 |
2660 | If anyone’s drowning I’ll just kill them to end their suffering. | 1.1848 | 0.04352 | 92 | 76 | 15 | 1 |
2661 | WOMAN, DISCARD YOUR SUIT OR PREPARE TO BATTLE | 1.1848 | 0.04870 | 92 | 78 | 11 | 3 |
2662 | My God, it's REALLY hot! | 1.1848 | 0.04619 | 92 | 77 | 13 | 2 |
2663 | I do know CPR - Chaste Princess Rescuing. | 1.1848 | 0.04619 | 92 | 77 | 13 | 2 |
2664 | If any man touches my castle he will need more than a mere woman to guard his life. | 1.1848 | 0.04870 | 92 | 78 | 11 | 3 |
2665 | I'm practicing for my Mar-a-Lago security interview. | 1.1848 | 0.04069 | 92 | 75 | 17 | 0 |
2666 | Starting to think I rented the wrong ‘guard’s’ attire… | 1.1848 | 0.04870 | 92 | 78 | 11 | 3 |
2667 | Please don't ask. | 1.1848 | 0.04870 | 92 | 78 | 11 | 3 |
2668 | so there I was pulling this sword out of a stone... | 1.1848 | 0.05338 | 92 | 80 | 7 | 5 |
2669 | You watch the swimmers, I'll watch for invaders crossing the moat. | 1.1845 | 0.04523 | 103 | 87 | 13 | 3 |
2670 | You've got the easy job, mine's pretty much impossible. | 1.1845 | 0.04523 | 103 | 87 | 13 | 3 |
2671 | Beware the tides of March, but don't sleep on the tides of June. | 1.1845 | 0.05116 | 103 | 90 | 7 | 6 |
2672 | Did you bring the trebeachet? | 1.1845 | 0.04523 | 103 | 87 | 13 | 3 |
2673 | We should coordinate. I'll save the damsels in distress on land, you save them in the water. | 1.1845 | 0.04308 | 103 | 86 | 15 | 2 |
2674 | After work why don't we go somewhere and joust? | 1.1845 | 0.04308 | 103 | 86 | 15 | 2 |
2675 | If it was just for children, why would they sell this in men's size? | 1.1842 | 0.05201 | 76 | 64 | 10 | 2 |
2676 | How's that for a moat? | 1.1842 | 0.04476 | 76 | 62 | 14 | 0 |
2677 | Guinevere, is our relationship built on equity or sand castles? | 1.1842 | 0.04476 | 76 | 62 | 14 | 0 |
2678 | OK, you're guarding the fool swimmwers. I'm for here for Castle defense! | 1.1842 | 0.04852 | 76 | 63 | 12 | 1 |
2679 | This outfit? It’s a moat point. | 1.1839 | 0.05047 | 87 | 74 | 10 | 3 |
2680 | After the tide rolls in, I'm all yours. | 1.1839 | 0.04775 | 87 | 73 | 12 | 2 |
2681 | Guarding the castle is hotter work than I thought! | 1.1839 | 0.04486 | 87 | 72 | 14 | 1 |
2682 | You call that a castle ?! | 1.1839 | 0.04486 | 87 | 72 | 14 | 1 |
2683 | anyone messes with my sand castle is skewered! | 1.1839 | 0.05305 | 87 | 75 | 8 | 4 |
2684 | You watch the ocean. I'll guard the castle. | 1.1839 | 0.04486 | 87 | 72 | 14 | 1 |
2685 | Just last week I saved someone who fell in the moat | 1.1839 | 0.04775 | 87 | 73 | 12 | 2 |
2686 | I have very little ambition. | 1.1839 | 0.05047 | 87 | 74 | 10 | 3 |
2687 | I fear there is high tide and traitors among us. | 1.1839 | 0.04178 | 87 | 71 | 16 | 0 |
2688 | When the tide comes in, you’re going to thank me. | 1.1839 | 0.05047 | 87 | 74 | 10 | 3 |
2689 | Shall we stroll through the castle my lady? | 1.1839 | 0.04775 | 87 | 73 | 12 | 2 |
2690 | I'm sorry. What's that word you used? "Quixotic"? | 1.1839 | 0.04775 | 87 | 73 | 12 | 2 |
2691 | It saves on sunblock | 1.1839 | 0.04775 | 87 | 73 | 12 | 2 |
2692 | My therapist calls it “arrested development” | 1.1839 | 0.04775 | 87 | 73 | 12 | 2 |
2693 | Don't even think about it! | 1.1837 | 0.04435 | 98 | 82 | 14 | 2 |
2694 | My kingdom for a pair of trunks! | 1.1837 | 0.04435 | 98 | 82 | 14 | 2 |
2695 | The last guy got beheaded after high tide. | 1.1837 | 0.04666 | 98 | 83 | 12 | 3 |
2696 | I have flood insurance. | 1.1835 | 0.04729 | 109 | 94 | 10 | 5 |
2697 | You'd need a transcontinental drawbridge to cross this moat. | 1.1835 | 0.04156 | 109 | 91 | 16 | 2 |
2698 | Do you mind watching the castle while I run to the bathroom? | 1.1833 | 0.03739 | 120 | 99 | 20 | 1 |
2699 | Sorry I’m late, horses were backed up on the Brooklyn Drawbridge. | 1.1831 | 0.05783 | 71 | 61 | 7 | 3 |
2700 | My kingdom may have gotten smaller, but somebody still needs to guard it. | 1.1831 | 0.05783 | 71 | 61 | 7 | 3 |
2701 | What’s a frisbee, and why is it a danger? | 1.1831 | 0.05039 | 71 | 59 | 11 | 1 |
2702 | SPFe | 1.1829 | 0.05522 | 82 | 71 | 7 | 4 |
2703 | If you spot any damsels in distress let me know. | 1.1829 | 0.04947 | 82 | 69 | 11 | 2 |
2704 | Tiny, sandy dragons. Why? | 1.1829 | 0.05522 | 82 | 71 | 7 | 4 |
2705 | I'm here to staff the ramparts. | 1.1829 | 0.05789 | 82 | 72 | 5 | 5 |
2706 | I was told that size does not matter. I take my job seriously. | 1.1829 | 0.04633 | 82 | 68 | 13 | 1 |
2707 | Reenactment isn’t what it used to be. | 1.1829 | 0.04633 | 82 | 68 | 13 | 1 |
2708 | I forgot my Sunblock. | 1.1829 | 0.04633 | 82 | 68 | 13 | 1 |
2709 | By any chance, does your suntan oil have a rust inhibitor? | 1.1829 | 0.04296 | 82 | 67 | 15 | 0 |
2710 | Oh,I burn very easily. | 1.1829 | 0.05243 | 82 | 70 | 9 | 3 |
2711 | My sworn duty is to protect the castle from the encroaching tide. Perchance do you have some WD-40? | 1.1828 | 0.04573 | 93 | 78 | 13 | 2 |
2712 | I think I’ve finally kicked my fear of sharks. | 1.1828 | 0.04573 | 93 | 78 | 13 | 2 |
2713 | I'm called in when the serf's up. | 1.1828 | 0.04822 | 93 | 79 | 11 | 3 |
2714 | If armed, I'll kill him; if not, you save him | 1.1828 | 0.04822 | 93 | 79 | 11 | 3 |
2715 | My horse suffers from aquaphobia. | 1.1828 | 0.04822 | 93 | 79 | 11 | 3 |
2716 | Have you seen my squire, Sandcho Panza? | 1.1828 | 0.04573 | 93 | 78 | 13 | 2 |
2717 | Beware of the serf's side. | 1.1828 | 0.04310 | 93 | 77 | 15 | 1 |
2718 | You know, I wrote a book on castle defense. | 1.1828 | 0.04822 | 93 | 79 | 11 | 3 |
2719 | I'll give you my spear if you give me your whistle. | 1.1827 | 0.04483 | 104 | 88 | 13 | 3 |
2720 | It’s the latest 100% plastic free and reusable sun protection | 1.1827 | 0.04270 | 104 | 87 | 15 | 2 |
2721 | ”Sand castle reminds me I sink in the ocean. | 1.1827 | 0.04687 | 104 | 89 | 11 | 4 |
2722 | The mayor hopes this brings in the LARPing groups. | 1.1826 | 0.04381 | 115 | 98 | 13 | 4 |
2723 | You watch the water. I’ll watch the castle. | 1.1818 | 0.04622 | 99 | 84 | 12 | 3 |
2724 | The moat's not doing a damn thing. | 1.1818 | 0.04440 | 88 | 73 | 14 | 1 |
2725 | It's much easier keeping watch at this scale. | 1.1818 | 0.04135 | 88 | 72 | 16 | 0 |
2726 | This castle has no drawbridge ! | 1.1818 | 0.05461 | 77 | 66 | 8 | 3 |
2727 | You guard the swimmers and I'll guard the castle. I can't swim in this trash. | 1.1818 | 0.04725 | 88 | 74 | 12 | 2 |
2728 | I’m Airbnb-ing my way up the coast.” | 1.1818 | 0.04440 | 88 | 73 | 14 | 1 |
2729 | To which Sand Kingdom do you pledge allegiance? | 1.1818 | 0.04994 | 88 | 75 | 10 | 3 |
2730 | What is it about cosplay that you don’t understand? | 1.1818 | 0.04725 | 88 | 74 | 12 | 2 |
2731 | SPF 350 | 1.1818 | 0.04424 | 77 | 63 | 14 | 0 |
2732 | I'd love to give you a tour, but the castle is under a lockdown. | 1.1818 | 0.05139 | 77 | 65 | 10 | 2 |
2733 | My friends call me David Hasselknight. | 1.1818 | 0.04424 | 77 | 63 | 14 | 0 |
2734 | Whats your mote Ive for building that sand structure and what the hell you staring at? | 1.1818 | 0.04994 | 88 | 75 | 10 | 3 |
2735 | Thou greatest enemy is that of high tide. | 1.1818 | 0.04440 | 88 | 73 | 14 | 1 |
2736 | The suit gives me SPF 100 protection. I built the castle so I would look more context-appropriate. | 1.1818 | 0.05461 | 77 | 66 | 8 | 3 |
2737 | Not my moat not my problem. | 1.1818 | 0.05139 | 77 | 65 | 10 | 2 |
2738 | What are you doing after the jousting matches? | 1.1818 | 0.04393 | 99 | 83 | 14 | 2 |
2739 | If someone ends up in that moat, just ignore them. Okay?" | 1.1818 | 0.04152 | 99 | 82 | 16 | 1 |
2740 | I'm moving to the tiny house to reduce my carbon footprint. | 1.1818 | 0.04795 | 77 | 64 | 12 | 1 |
2741 | Guarding sandcastles? I think they want me to quit. | 1.1818 | 0.03892 | 121 | 101 | 18 | 2 |
2742 | Give me Excalibur and I will ride by your side, and together we will vanquish high tide! | 1.1818 | 0.04725 | 88 | 74 | 12 | 2 |
2743 | Would you mind catapulting me some sunscreen? | 1.1818 | 0.04725 | 88 | 74 | 12 | 2 |
2744 | You know there’s a labor shortage, all the ad said was “heroes wanted.” | 1.1818 | 0.04725 | 88 | 74 | 12 | 2 |
2745 | With the price of water-front property these days, you can’t skimp on security | 1.1818 | 0.04725 | 88 | 74 | 12 | 2 |
2746 | Sometimes cultural appropriation is pretty cut and dry | 1.1818 | 0.05249 | 88 | 76 | 8 | 4 |
2747 | So, if the dragon isn't drowning, then I just go ahead and slay. | 1.1809 | 0.03991 | 94 | 77 | 17 | 0 |
2748 | Look, m'lady, I have his castle covered. Now, for the love of dear Zeus, go rescue Sparty! | 1.1809 | 0.05008 | 94 | 81 | 9 | 4 |
2749 | There’s a moat so I’m gonna take off. | 1.1809 | 0.04774 | 94 | 80 | 11 | 3 |
2750 | When your just not beach body ready… | 1.1809 | 0.04268 | 94 | 78 | 15 | 1 |
2751 | I've commanded the tide not to come in. | 1.1809 | 0.04528 | 94 | 79 | 13 | 2 |
2752 | Laugh, but just you wait until the sand crabs attack. | 1.1809 | 0.04774 | 94 | 80 | 11 | 3 |
2753 | After Caesar's assassination most of his guards fled Rome to pursue other talents of preservation | 1.1809 | 0.04268 | 94 | 78 | 15 | 1 |
2754 | “The Valvoline I use for the rust also acts as a sunscreen.” | 1.1809 | 0.03991 | 94 | 77 | 17 | 0 |
2755 | Hi, I'm Rusty. Nice to meet you. | 1.1809 | 0.05008 | 94 | 81 | 9 | 4 |
2756 | It's just a one time thing. | 1.1809 | 0.05008 | 94 | 81 | 9 | 4 |
2757 | What is this "tide" that I must slay? | 1.1807 | 0.05460 | 83 | 72 | 7 | 4 |
2758 | Let your hair down a bit, Rapunzle! | 1.1807 | 0.04892 | 83 | 70 | 11 | 2 |
2759 | You protect swimmers and I'll protect the castle. | 1.1807 | 0.04892 | 83 | 70 | 11 | 2 |
2760 | Yeah, I’m a 12th Century Millennial. This is the only home I can afford to buy. | 1.1807 | 0.05184 | 83 | 71 | 9 | 3 |
2761 | Okay, I'll get everything up to the water and you cover everything from there out. |