These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.
Name | Value |
---|---|
Submission deadline | 2021-01-10T17:40:00.000Z |
Voting started | - |
Voting ended | 2021-01-24T17:54:00.000Z |
Finalists announced | 2021-01-18T17:53:00.000Z |
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued | January 25, 2020 |
Number of captions | 6956 |
Number of responses | 949488 |
Number of participants | - |
In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.
Rank | Caption | Mean | Precision | Total votes | "Unfunny" votes | "Somewhat funny" votes | "Funny" votes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
0 | Of course we wanted a son. But we also wanted unconditional love. | 2.1456 | 0.00662 | 13477 | 3146 | 5223 | 5108 |
1 | When you've mastered "sit" and "stay" you'll be a Good Boy too | 2.0726 | 0.00977 | 5949 | 1490 | 2537 | 1922 |
2 | Let's think of a better word to call his mommy. | 2.0122 | 0.00720 | 13318 | 4521 | 4113 | 4684 |
3 | He may be my best friend, but you will always be the reason mom and I got married. | 2.0011 | 0.00751 | 11803 | 3919 | 3952 | 3932 |
4 | "You don't need a suit -- you're only seven. He's forty-nine." | 1.9848 | 0.00940 | 6821 | 2106 | 2713 | 2002 |
5 | He gets dessert because he ate everything on your plate. | 1.9844 | 0.01250 | 3979 | 1268 | 1505 | 1206 |
6 | Of course you're not a rescue...who would say that to you? | 1.9432 | 0.00789 | 10246 | 3578 | 3672 | 2996 |
7 | You said you wanted a baby brother... You said you wanted a puppy... Win-win! | 1.9394 | 0.00824 | 9024 | 3053 | 3465 | 2506 |
8 | Once tax season is over, you can go back to being the only child. | 1.9255 | 0.00776 | 10597 | 3806 | 3774 | 3017 |
9 | Student of the Year is fine, son, but it isn't Best in Show. | 1.9253 | 0.00804 | 9880 | 3549 | 3520 | 2811 |
10 | He said you ate his homework. | 1.9172 | 0.00798 | 10170 | 3751 | 3510 | 2909 |
11 | We’ll miss you Bobby, but the dog is allergic | 1.8928 | 0.00942 | 7837 | 3190 | 2297 | 2350 |
12 | But it's Andy's turn today and Andy wants to go to the dog park. | 1.8841 | 0.00922 | 6676 | 2327 | 2796 | 1553 |
13 | He said you bit him first. | 1.8607 | 0.01323 | 3366 | 1258 | 1319 | 789 |
14 | Because he identifies as a boy and that’s that | 1.8543 | 0.01070 | 5566 | 2239 | 1899 | 1428 |
15 | Grandma left all her money to little Winston, so we have to be really, really nice to him. | 1.8530 | 0.01063 | 5395 | 2099 | 1990 | 1306 |
16 | But look how well obedience school worked for him! | 1.8524 | 0.00947 | 6545 | 2475 | 2561 | 1509 |
17 | He gets to wear his pants backwards because that's where his tail is. | 1.8470 | 0.00969 | 6841 | 2801 | 2286 | 1754 |
18 | You're a good boy too, Jack | 1.8445 | 0.00896 | 6720 | 2416 | 2933 | 1371 |
19 | No, you are the little bastard. He is a son of a bitch. | 1.8335 | 0.01022 | 6668 | 2970 | 1838 | 1860 |
20 | It's only until we board the plane. | 1.8238 | 0.01107 | 4808 | 1914 | 1827 | 1067 |
21 | Maybe you could use your next wish to change your sister back before Mommy gets home? | 1.8070 | 0.01176 | 4688 | 2059 | 1475 | 1154 |
22 | Don't be mad. You do kind of look like a fire hydrant. | 1.8040 | 0.01109 | 5438 | 2457 | 1590 | 1391 |
23 | The joke’s on him, son. He thinks we’re taking him to get tutored. | 1.7982 | 0.01234 | 4218 | 1865 | 1339 | 1014 |
24 | He's the chick magnet. You want a new mom, don't you? | 1.7460 | 0.01190 | 4248 | 1953 | 1421 | 874 |
25 | We don't love you any less, it's just that he is already housebroken, has graduated from obedience school, doesn't bite strangers, and comes when called. | 1.7449 | 0.01031 | 5555 | 2530 | 1912 | 1113 |
26 | Who's a good boy? | 1.7367 | 0.00946 | 6824 | 3217 | 2187 | 1420 |
27 | He's British - those ARE his play clothes! | 1.7176 | 0.01328 | 3283 | 1545 | 1120 | 618 |
28 | Okay, who wants to go for a walk? | 1.7142 | 0.00958 | 6826 | 3392 | 1993 | 1441 |
29 | He's your brother now, and an extra $600 in stimulus money | 1.7117 | 0.01294 | 3354 | 1565 | 1191 | 598 |
30 | Of course you'll have fun at obedience school. Look what it did for your brother! | 1.7091 | 0.00995 | 5844 | 2789 | 1966 | 1089 |
31 | I told you if I homeschooled you, Buddy would be teacher's pet. | 1.7020 | 0.01054 | 5875 | 3055 | 1516 | 1304 |
32 | Your brother identifies as a dog. | 1.6936 | 0.01254 | 3864 | 1947 | 1154 | 763 |
33 | Trust Me Son, You have Different Mothers. | 1.6924 | 0.01814 | 1726 | 837 | 583 | 306 |
34 | Well, yes, technically, he is the teacher's pet. | 1.6881 | 0.01241 | 3710 | 1834 | 1205 | 670 |
35 | It’s ok. I still like you more than the cat. | 1.6795 | 0.01377 | 2970 | 1464 | 994 | 512 |
36 | Your teacher called. Did you tell her your brother ate your homework again? | 1.6789 | 0.01247 | 3616 | 1783 | 1211 | 622 |
37 | The sign says dogs must wear a collar. | 1.6767 | 0.01657 | 2029 | 999 | 687 | 343 |
38 | Don’t worry; what happened to your brother is purely a coincidence. The vaccine is completely safe. | 1.6697 | 0.01583 | 2543 | 1369 | 645 | 529 |
39 | It's my hand or the leash. Your choice. | 1.6693 | 0.01492 | 2525 | 1265 | 830 | 430 |
40 | Daddy was asking a rhetorical question, honey. You’re both good boys. | 1.6680 | 0.01301 | 3325 | 1670 | 1089 | 566 |
41 | I know you have to go, but I only brought one plastic bag. | 1.6676 | 0.01568 | 2389 | 1230 | 723 | 436 |
42 | And if you’d practiced like I asked you to, we’d be going to YOUR recital. | 1.6657 | 0.01553 | 2369 | 1205 | 751 | 413 |
43 | Jimmy felt the rage build as his father explained the double standard for why only one of them was a "good boy" for pooping in the yard. | 1.6647 | 0.01750 | 2019 | 1076 | 544 | 399 |
44 | Don't be jealous, Timmy. If you win a dog show, I'll buy you a suit too. | 1.6562 | 0.01385 | 2821 | 1415 | 961 | 445 |
45 | We adopted you because he asked for a boy to play with. | 1.6546 | 0.01737 | 1879 | 969 | 590 | 320 |
46 | It’s not that I love you less, but that he loves me more. | 1.6543 | 0.01561 | 2300 | 1179 | 737 | 384 |
47 | Sorry, I had a hangover and got confused. I got Fido dressed for school and you got the worm medicine. | 1.6529 | 0.02231 | 1210 | 647 | 336 | 227 |
48 | "But it doesn't even fit you anymore!" | 1.6497 | 0.01488 | 2495 | 1279 | 811 | 405 |
49 | You don't have to sniff his. | 1.6481 | 0.01651 | 2214 | 1194 | 605 | 415 |
50 | Rex self-identifies as a human now, so he says he won't be fetching your ball anymore. | 1.6423 | 0.01638 | 2091 | 1094 | 651 | 346 |
51 | It's only till we get the $2,000 check. | 1.6390 | 0.03882 | 374 | 197 | 115 | 62 |
52 | I picked him. You were an accident. | 1.6373 | 0.02416 | 965 | 510 | 295 | 160 |
53 | I’m sorry, but in dog years he’s technically the older brother. | 1.6359 | 0.01704 | 1766 | 891 | 627 | 248 |
54 | Well yes, technically he is a son of a bitch, but we don't use that language!" | 1.6353 | 0.01683 | 1969 | 1039 | 609 | 321 |
55 | He says he'd rather you fetch it. | 1.6314 | 0.01868 | 1609 | 857 | 488 | 264 |
56 | But you said you'd rather have a puppy than a brother or sister. | 1.6176 | 0.02536 | 774 | 397 | 276 | 101 |
57 | So, Billy, what tricks can you do? | 1.6158 | 0.01860 | 1434 | 737 | 511 | 186 |
58 | Max, he’s your age and he acts 7 times older. | 1.6149 | 0.01862 | 1462 | 760 | 505 | 197 |
59 | I’m sorry, but we only saved enough to send one of you to boarding school. | 1.6141 | 0.01867 | 1459 | 761 | 500 | 198 |
60 | You see, Johnny, it’s $600 per child. This is your brother now. | 1.6115 | 0.01970 | 1403 | 760 | 428 | 215 |
61 | We have decided to send Spot to college and you to obedience school | 1.6098 | 0.01999 | 1366 | 743 | 413 | 210 |
62 | Of course I like him more. He’s potty trained. | 1.6066 | 0.02052 | 1304 | 715 | 387 | 202 |
63 | I was just kidding. You don’t have to sniff his butt. Just be nice. | 1.6065 | 0.02033 | 1329 | 729 | 394 | 206 |
64 | You don't have to dress like him. He's a show dog. | 1.6064 | 0.03369 | 437 | 228 | 153 | 56 |
65 | I want to poop outside too! | 1.6056 | 0.03099 | 573 | 315 | 169 | 89 |
66 | Don't be silly. Dogs don't wear shoes. | 1.6036 | 0.02524 | 840 | 457 | 259 | 124 |
67 | He promises not to use his nose during the next game of hide and seek. | 1.5998 | 0.02075 | 1157 | 612 | 396 | 149 |
68 | If it makes you feel better, you're adopted too. | 1.5998 | 0.02197 | 1132 | 626 | 333 | 173 |
69 | Look at it this way, you get all the chocolate. | 1.5991 | 0.02149 | 1100 | 588 | 365 | 147 |
70 | Your school shut down again so I need you to be a very good boy at doggy daycare today. | 1.5951 | 0.02276 | 1067 | 598 | 303 | 166 |
71 | He's right. It's your turn to fetch. | 1.5933 | 0.02196 | 1045 | 562 | 346 | 137 |
72 | Because Daddy needs to stay in Grandma's will, tbat's wby. | 1.5930 | 0.02195 | 1064 | 577 | 343 | 144 |
73 | come on son; you grew out of it, and now it fits him !!!! | 1.5917 | 0.03905 | 338 | 184 | 108 | 46 |
74 | Mommy and I wanted to give you a baby brother. You said you’d rather have a puppy. I think this a reasonable compromise. | 1.5909 | 0.02219 | 1034 | 561 | 335 | 138 |
75 | I know you miss your other friends but he is he only one who has gotten his shots. | 1.5902 | 0.02328 | 959 | 526 | 300 | 133 |
76 | Did you ever think he might be embarrassed to be seen with you? | 1.5902 | 0.02448 | 854 | 465 | 274 | 115 |
77 | Now, c'mon Dennis -- you got the opposable thumbs... | 1.5900 | 0.02196 | 1056 | 574 | 341 | 141 |
78 | You’ll have the same privileges as soon as you’re house trained. | 1.5899 | 0.02273 | 1012 | 557 | 313 | 142 |
79 | When you finish obedience school, I'll buy you a new outfit too. | 1.5890 | 0.02199 | 1034 | 558 | 343 | 133 |
80 | Now say you’re sorry and lick each other’s faces | 1.5887 | 0.03367 | 423 | 224 | 149 | 50 |
81 | Of course, you're a good boy, too. | 1.5872 | 0.02288 | 969 | 528 | 313 | 128 |
82 | Your mother and I believed having you would prepare us for a dog. | 1.5855 | 0.02445 | 936 | 536 | 252 | 148 |
83 | We rescued him from a prep school . | 1.5848 | 0.02406 | 920 | 515 | 272 | 133 |
84 | You call him “brother,” not, “rescue-brother.” | 1.5824 | 0.02310 | 934 | 509 | 306 | 119 |
85 | Mr. Buttons promises he won't sniff you there again. | 1.5811 | 0.02404 | 962 | 553 | 259 | 150 |
86 | We can't all have tails. Remember, you have thumbs. | 1.5786 | 0.02854 | 636 | 355 | 194 | 87 |
87 | Your brother says he didn't eat your homework. | 1.5783 | 0.02442 | 894 | 506 | 259 | 129 |
88 | He's a rescue. From the Upper East Side. | 1.5783 | 0.02534 | 811 | 454 | 245 | 112 |
89 | When your Instagram gets 1 million followers then we will take pictures of you, but for now we work for Nigel because it pays the bills. | 1.5766 | 0.02544 | 822 | 466 | 238 | 118 |
90 | Look at it this way. You wanted a little brother. You wanted a puppy. Be happy, now you have both. | 1.5657 | 0.02442 | 799 | 439 | 268 | 92 |
91 | Second-best friend is nothing to be ashamed of, son. | 1.5656 | 0.02550 | 778 | 439 | 238 | 101 |
92 | It's an extra $600 per child and that's why he's your brother now. | 1.5634 | 0.02584 | 765 | 435 | 229 | 101 |
93 | Now, you behave or we'll remove your testicles too. | 1.5623 | 0.02906 | 722 | 447 | 144 | 131 |
94 | Now sniff and make up. | 1.5623 | 0.02666 | 706 | 399 | 217 | 90 |
95 | It's not you, son. He just has better breeding. | 1.5620 | 0.02701 | 694 | 394 | 210 | 90 |
96 | When you're best in show, you can have nice clothes too. | 1.5615 | 0.02669 | 748 | 435 | 206 | 107 |
97 | You were an accident, Rufus was a choice. | 1.5592 | 0.02760 | 667 | 381 | 199 | 87 |
98 | C'mon, sniff his butt and say you're sorry. | 1.5589 | 0.02775 | 721 | 429 | 181 | 111 |
99 | I’m sorry, Tommy, but we could only afford private school for one of you, and Rover’s test scores were better. | 1.5583 | 0.02797 | 695 | 410 | 182 | 103 |
100 | Once you’’re housebroken you can have a treat too. | 1.5554 | 0.02622 | 695 | 389 | 226 | 80 |
101 | Hey little buddy. You are special - you get to poop inside | 1.5554 | 0.02703 | 686 | 392 | 207 | 87 |
102 | Because he is the grandson of a national champion and you are the grandson of an insurance salesman. | 1.5552 | 0.02678 | 670 | 376 | 216 | 78 |
103 | Young man, what did I say about dressing up Sparky in your uniform and putting him on the school bus?! | 1.5540 | 0.03046 | 565 | 330 | 157 | 78 |
104 | It’s like I’ve always told you, Timmy, dress for the job you want. Ralph gets it. | 1.5493 | 0.02852 | 619 | 358 | 182 | 79 |
105 | His chosen pronoun is dog. | 1.5477 | 0.02853 | 619 | 359 | 181 | 79 |
106 | Now I know he dresses better than you son, but then he has to go out more often | 1.5461 | 0.02905 | 575 | 329 | 178 | 68 |
107 | Jackson, Amos is part of the family now, and we’re going to love him just like we love you. Only more. | 1.5450 | 0.02906 | 622 | 369 | 167 | 86 |
108 | This is the closest thing to a normal childhood I can arrange for you right now. | 1.5433 | 0.02835 | 600 | 344 | 186 | 70 |
109 | Another reason Franklin is special is because he doesn’t wet his bed. | 1.5425 | 0.02908 | 588 | 342 | 173 | 73 |
110 | ‘I miss your mom too but she shouldn’t have asked me to choose.’ | 1.5419 | 0.03034 | 561 | 332 | 154 | 75 |
111 | Sorry, this is as close to a playdate as I could arrange. | 1.5411 | 0.02863 | 584 | 335 | 182 | 67 |
112 | Yes, you do have to be a big boy; you're both 3 but your brother behaves like he's 21. | 1.5406 | 0.02864 | 603 | 351 | 178 | 74 |
113 | Well someone got an A in obedience school. | 1.5396 | 0.03733 | 328 | 185 | 109 | 34 |
114 | You're a good boy too Jimmy, it's just that Buster is a really really good boy. | 1.5389 | 0.02944 | 540 | 308 | 173 | 59 |
115 | That’s what you’re wearing to the dog park? | 1.5381 | 0.03017 | 578 | 347 | 151 | 80 |
116 | You are a good boy. He's just a better boy. | 1.5376 | 0.03035 | 532 | 310 | 158 | 64 |
117 | Son, you’re acting like a child. | 1.5369 | 0.03036 | 529 | 308 | 158 | 63 |
118 | I told you he was a working breed when we rescued him | 1.5359 | 0.02902 | 571 | 331 | 174 | 66 |
119 | ...He said he smells it on you, so let me ask again.... | 1.5357 | 0.03498 | 392 | 227 | 120 | 45 |
120 | You said you wanted a puppy and a little brother. This way you get both! | 1.5327 | 0.03138 | 490 | 286 | 147 | 57 |
121 | Rusty now identifies as an English school boy and wants to be called Oliver. | 1.5321 | 0.03292 | 483 | 292 | 125 | 66 |
122 | Oh, stop whining Donald. After all, it's not everyday you see a trained dog get elected as Class President. | 1.5301 | 0.03060 | 532 | 316 | 150 | 66 |
123 | Come on now Timmy, the rescue group said you were good with small dogs, we don’t want to have to take you back. | 1.5296 | 0.03141 | 506 | 301 | 142 | 63 |
124 | Once we get the extra stimulus check,I promise he goes back to being a dog. | 1.5294 | 0.03171 | 510 | 307 | 136 | 67 |
125 | Well guess what, Timmy- you’re adopted too | 1.5281 | 0.03303 | 481 | 293 | 122 | 66 |
126 | We can afford private school only for one of you and Bobo simply has more promise | 1.5260 | 0.03082 | 519 | 309 | 147 | 63 |
127 | Rover's trained to sit, speak, and not put me in a nursing home. | 1.5258 | 0.03164 | 485 | 287 | 141 | 57 |
128 | Your brother said he's sorry for eating your homework. Now you apologize for copying his. | 1.5254 | 0.03300 | 453 | 270 | 128 | 55 |
129 | Rover says you ate his homework. | 1.5247 | 0.03198 | 507 | 309 | 130 | 68 |
130 | When you're older you'll understand why I can't let you pee on the sidewalk, too | 1.5247 | 0.03036 | 507 | 296 | 156 | 55 |
131 | The dog said you ate his homework. | 1.5239 | 0.03320 | 460 | 278 | 123 | 59 |
132 | Look: He's learned "heel," "sit," and "fetch" already, and you just keep saying "No!" and "Why?" | 1.5236 | 0.03288 | 466 | 281 | 126 | 59 |
133 | Well, your mom wanted a kid, I wanted a dog, and the dog wanted an MBA. | 1.5226 | 0.03321 | 465 | 283 | 121 | 61 |
134 | You're also a good boy. | 1.5223 | 0.03212 | 494 | 300 | 130 | 64 |
135 | Of course he acts grown up!..in dog years, he's 35... | 1.5214 | 0.03000 | 491 | 282 | 162 | 47 |
136 | I'm not playing favorites but, he is my best friend. | 1.5197 | 0.03064 | 483 | 281 | 153 | 49 |
137 | Obedience school, Billy. Don't knock it 'til you've tried it. | 1.5191 | 0.03187 | 472 | 281 | 137 | 54 |
138 | He’s a canine-American, not a mutt. | 1.5189 | 0.04224 | 264 | 156 | 79 | 29 |
139 | But sweetie you refused to wear it when Grandma sent it to you.” | 1.5187 | 0.03626 | 374 | 225 | 104 | 45 |
140 | It not about who I love more, it’s about fooling the surveillance cameras in the carpool lane. | 1.5185 | 0.03357 | 432 | 259 | 122 | 51 |
141 | Meet your new Covid free playmate. | 1.5167 | 0.03527 | 420 | 260 | 103 | 57 |
142 | It doesn't even fit you anymore! | 1.5161 | 0.03198 | 467 | 279 | 135 | 53 |
143 | Fair's fair. We went out for human food last weekend. | 1.5158 | 0.03305 | 444 | 267 | 125 | 52 |
144 | You said you wanted a puppy...and a baby brother. Now you've got both! | 1.5145 | 0.03293 | 414 | 242 | 131 | 41 |
145 | Hey, he'll never be the tax deduction you are! | 1.5143 | 0.05428 | 175 | 108 | 44 | 23 |
146 | I asked you to wear the suit and you said no. | 1.5142 | 0.03130 | 457 | 267 | 145 | 45 |
147 | You chose pizza last time, so this time it's Sparky's turn and he wants kibble. | 1.5133 | 0.03409 | 415 | 250 | 117 | 48 |
148 | But just think what a great college entrance essay you'll be able to write. | 1.5128 | 0.03249 | 431 | 254 | 133 | 44 |
149 | Until this is over, he's your playdate | 1.5106 | 0.03249 | 425 | 250 | 133 | 42 |
150 | Billy, we’ve already explained this...you were the mistake, he was a choice | 1.5103 | 0.03404 | 435 | 268 | 112 | 55 |
151 | You're my son, and he's my best friend. | 1.5101 | 0.03499 | 398 | 242 | 109 | 47 |
152 | Who's my second-best boy? | 1.5100 | 0.03803 | 351 | 217 | 89 | 45 |
153 | Fetch is not in his vocabulary. Try summons. | 1.5091 | 0.03544 | 383 | 232 | 107 | 44 |
154 | I've explained this to you before, pal. He goes to an exclusive doggy daycare. You go to a public school. | 1.5091 | 0.03146 | 438 | 255 | 143 | 40 |
155 | Play nice with him, he doesn’t know he’s adopted. | 1.5082 | 0.03277 | 429 | 256 | 128 | 45 |
156 | You’re going to love obedience school. | 1.5070 | 0.03398 | 428 | 263 | 113 | 52 |
157 | Please be a big boy and give him back his shoes. | 1.5066 | 0.03412 | 379 | 223 | 120 | 36 |
158 | Come on now. Who’s a good boy? | 1.5066 | 0.03432 | 379 | 224 | 118 | 37 |
159 | Well, maybe you could show more enthusiasm when I come home. | 1.5061 | 0.03723 | 330 | 197 | 99 | 34 |
160 | Didn't you ask Santa, for a brother and a dog?! | 1.5059 | 0.03390 | 421 | 257 | 115 | 49 |
161 | 'Well, well. Looks like someone ELSE is ready for obedience school.' | 1.5052 | 0.03315 | 388 | 226 | 128 | 34 |
162 | You already outgrew that outfit and it looks so cute on him! | 1.5050 | 0.03377 | 400 | 239 | 120 | 41 |
163 | Listen, you can eat his home-work if you want. | 1.5047 | 0.03306 | 424 | 255 | 124 | 45 |
164 | . “Come on Billy let’s be supportive. Rover’s transitioning.” | 1.5037 | 0.03437 | 405 | 247 | 112 | 46 |
165 | Just tell your friends we're a blended family. | 1.5013 | 0.03350 | 379 | 222 | 124 | 33 |
166 | You’re both adopted. | 1.5000 | 0.03571 | 398 | 250 | 97 | 51 |
167 | It’s time to leave the White House Donald.Would you like to have this dog? He’s very loyal. | 1.5000 | 0.05501 | 172 | 109 | 40 | 23 |
168 | His mother is technically a bitch but you’re still grounded for saying that | 1.5000 | 0.03693 | 398 | 257 | 83 | 58 |
169 | Come on, lighten up. When you’re fourteen, he’ll be ninety-eight! | 1.4986 | 0.03617 | 367 | 226 | 99 | 42 |
170 | Look on the bright side, Tommy. Only one of you got spayed. | 1.4985 | 0.03747 | 333 | 203 | 94 | 36 |
171 | He can go back to school because he's already vaccinated. | 1.4968 | 0.04049 | 308 | 194 | 75 | 39 |
172 | What’d you expect, he’s a working dog. | 1.4965 | 0.04058 | 282 | 172 | 80 | 30 |
173 | It was a little small for you and they had a no-return policy | 1.4962 | 0.03458 | 393 | 241 | 109 | 43 |
174 | We have to accept that your brother has become a Republican! | 1.4960 | 0.03717 | 375 | 239 | 86 | 50 |
175 | When it's your birthday, it'll be your turn to ride with your head out the window. | 1.4955 | 0.03691 | 337 | 205 | 97 | 35 |
176 | I promise never to mix up your brown bag lunches again. | 1.4947 | 0.03506 | 380 | 233 | 106 | 41 |
177 | We can’t afford to keep you both and frankly, he’s easier to train | 1.4928 | 0.03666 | 349 | 215 | 96 | 38 |
178 | He learned to stand...can you learn to sit and stay? | 1.4922 | 0.03685 | 319 | 191 | 99 | 29 |
179 | He did your homework before he ate it. | 1.4922 | 0.03738 | 319 | 193 | 95 | 31 |
180 | Use your words. Speak, Billy, speak! | 1.4919 | 0.03581 | 372 | 231 | 99 | 42 |
181 | Did you two know that your moms both have something in common? | 1.4909 | 0.03886 | 328 | 207 | 81 | 40 |
182 | For the last time, Timmy, Rover’s going to prep school. You’re going to obedience school.” | 1.4906 | 0.03708 | 371 | 237 | 86 | 48 |
183 | Be a good boy and fetch your brother his briefcase. | 1.4894 | 0.03853 | 329 | 207 | 83 | 39 |
184 | Apologize for calling your sister a bitch. | 1.4891 | 0.03665 | 366 | 231 | 91 | 44 |
185 | Well, I asked him, “WHO’S A GOOD BOY? WHO’S A GOOD BOY?” He sat up and wagged his tail, so apparently he is. | 1.4890 | 0.03547 | 362 | 222 | 103 | 37 |
186 | Well, let's just wait until we hear back from AncestryDNA. | 1.4886 | 0.03725 | 350 | 220 | 89 | 41 |
187 | Rover says it is his turn to throw the ball and you chase it, | 1.4877 | 0.03526 | 365 | 224 | 104 | 37 |
188 | C'mon kiddo...it doesn't fit you anymore. | 1.4875 | 0.03554 | 361 | 222 | 102 | 37 |
189 | Ha, that's rich! Like we can afford to send two kids private school! | 1.4859 | 0.03943 | 319 | 203 | 77 | 39 |
190 | Timmy! It’s bad enough to pee on the floor! But to blame your brother?! | 1.4859 | 0.03918 | 319 | 202 | 79 | 38 |
191 | This time we’re boarding YOU and taking Randolph on vacation. | 1.4853 | 0.03783 | 340 | 215 | 85 | 40 |
192 | Yes, he started it, but then you didn't have to drink from his water bowl! | 1.4846 | 0.03517 | 357 | 218 | 105 | 34 |
193 | Here’s the deal. You fetch the paper, you get a suit. | 1.4845 | 0.04118 | 258 | 157 | 77 | 24 |
194 | When you sit on command, you'll get a treat too | 1.4843 | 0.03716 | 351 | 222 | 88 | 41 |
195 | You fetch the bone. Maurice has his violin lesson. | 1.4842 | 0.03776 | 349 | 223 | 83 | 43 |
196 | If he were my favorite would I make him wear short pants and a Peter Pan collar? | 1.4841 | 0.03542 | 347 | 211 | 104 | 32 |
197 | We’ll go to the park after Fenimore’s recital. | 1.4841 | 0.03674 | 345 | 215 | 93 | 37 |
198 | Relax; all the statistics say you start being smarter than him in another year! | 1.4838 | 0.03833 | 308 | 190 | 87 | 31 |
199 | Relax, he thinks he’s being ‘tutored’. | 1.4835 | 0.05093 | 182 | 114 | 48 | 20 |
200 | You'd be famous too if you could walk without using two of your legs. | 1.4830 | 0.03704 | 323 | 198 | 94 | 31 |
201 | More than just eating your homework, he can actually do your homework! | 1.4829 | 0.04167 | 263 | 163 | 73 | 27 |
202 | Don't tell your sister she's adopted. | 1.4827 | 0.03734 | 346 | 219 | 87 | 40 |
203 | ...and who’s my SECOND best friend! | 1.4825 | 0.03922 | 342 | 224 | 71 | 47 |
204 | We just can’t afford private school for both of you | 1.4825 | 0.03811 | 342 | 219 | 81 | 42 |
205 | I know he still does it Timmy but that's not what people do when they meet a new person for the first time. | 1.4824 | 0.03828 | 340 | 218 | 80 | 42 |
206 | Always dress for the job you want, Billy. | 1.4822 | 0.03768 | 309 | 189 | 91 | 29 |
207 | Those are the only two choices: a working dog or a show dog. He's made his choice, now you make yours. | 1.4814 | 0.03685 | 322 | 197 | 95 | 30 |
208 | This is your new Lab partner | 1.4812 | 0.03786 | 345 | 221 | 82 | 42 |
209 | When you graduate from obedience school, you'll get a new outfit too. | 1.4811 | 0.04014 | 318 | 209 | 66 | 43 |
210 | ‘When they ask about your ‘brother’ for the stimulus check, what do you say?’ | 1.4809 | 0.03797 | 341 | 218 | 82 | 41 |
211 | No, you WERE older. He's technically 7 now." | 1.4809 | 0.03779 | 314 | 194 | 89 | 31 |
212 | Oh look, it’s a little boy. Should we take him home? | 1.4807 | 0.03737 | 337 | 212 | 88 | 37 |
213 | I don’t care what it says in the dictionary, your sister is not a bitch, Charlie. | 1.4807 | 0.03807 | 337 | 215 | 82 | 40 |
214 | Don't be silly. I also love you like a son | 1.4805 | 0.03941 | 308 | 195 | 78 | 35 |
215 | ...he’ll never leave home AND he won’t require the cost of a college education. Think about it. | 1.4805 | 0.03598 | 333 | 203 | 100 | 30 |
216 | This will be fun, now go get your collar and leash. | 1.4790 | 0.03878 | 309 | 194 | 82 | 33 |
217 | It's Take your Dog to Work Day today, but it will be your turn next month! | 1.4789 | 0.03580 | 332 | 202 | 101 | 29 |
218 | When you wear the clothes Gram sends, you get more treats. Simple as that. | 1.4773 | 0.03804 | 308 | 191 | 87 | 30 |
219 | I don’t know why you’re upset, you said you wouldn’t wear the suit. | 1.4773 | 0.03832 | 308 | 192 | 85 | 31 |
220 | Five minutes out of the crate and we're already having a tantrum? | 1.4771 | 0.03869 | 327 | 210 | 78 | 39 |
221 | Why didn’t you go when your brother went? | 1.4771 | 0.03796 | 327 | 207 | 84 | 36 |
222 | Nonsense, Billy! We love you both the same. | 1.4771 | 0.03695 | 327 | 203 | 92 | 32 |
223 | Now your turn Timmie. Be a good boy and fetch daddy a beer. | 1.4769 | 0.03763 | 325 | 204 | 87 | 34 |
224 | You asked for a dog and a little brother... | 1.4769 | 0.03939 | 281 | 173 | 82 | 26 |
225 | Lighten up, Jasper will play with you later today after he finishes jury duty. | 1.4767 | 0.04987 | 193 | 123 | 48 | 22 |
226 | I finally got you a COVID playdate. | 1.4766 | 0.03719 | 321 | 199 | 91 | 31 |
227 | It's just for Take Your Dog To Work Day. | 1.4760 | 0.03924 | 292 | 182 | 81 | 29 |
228 | C’mon, he’ll be great on the frisbee team. | 1.4759 | 0.03777 | 332 | 211 | 84 | 37 |
229 | Buck up Tommy! You're a cute kid, but he's a pedigree. | 1.4756 | 0.03785 | 307 | 190 | 88 | 29 |
230 | He may be my be my best friend, but you’ll always be my son. | 1.4755 | 0.03547 | 326 | 197 | 103 | 26 |
231 | If he could learn to do it standing up, so can you | 1.4744 | 0.03914 | 293 | 183 | 81 | 29 |
232 | C'mon - you can be a good boy too! | 1.4742 | 0.03921 | 310 | 198 | 77 | 35 |
233 | Don't be jealous, you're both adopted. | 1.4738 | 0.03737 | 325 | 204 | 88 | 33 |
234 | Ah, c’mon, you wanna pee on hydrants, he wants to eat at the table. I’m not seeing a lot of differences here... | 1.4732 | 0.03959 | 317 | 206 | 72 | 39 |
235 | If Sparky can learn how to walk on two legs, you can learn how to use the potty. | 1.4732 | 0.03857 | 317 | 202 | 80 | 35 |
236 | Come on Tommy, where did you hide his cell phone? | 1.4725 | 0.04908 | 182 | 113 | 52 | 17 |
237 | It's not that we love him more, it's just that he's housebroken. | 1.4721 | 0.04064 | 269 | 168 | 75 | 26 |
238 | Cmon, he’ll give it back to you after his bark mitzvah. | 1.4716 | 0.04486 | 229 | 145 | 60 | 24 |
239 | If you return his ball, he'll return your clothes. | 1.4714 | 0.03948 | 280 | 174 | 80 | 26 |
240 | Remember, you've got thumbs. | 1.4712 | 0.03774 | 295 | 181 | 89 | 25 |
241 | He claims that he did not eat your homework | 1.4708 | 0.03716 | 291 | 176 | 93 | 22 |
242 | Use your words, speak. | 1.4701 | 0.03970 | 268 | 165 | 80 | 23 |
243 | Don't be upset Billy, just be glad your mother doesn't make you wear ridiculous outfits and poop in the street. | 1.4698 | 0.03952 | 315 | 205 | 72 | 38 |
244 | Shake? | 1.4698 | 0.03742 | 315 | 197 | 88 | 30 |
245 | It worked out for Stuart Little and it will work out for us too. | 1.4698 | 0.03687 | 315 | 195 | 92 | 28 |
246 | It may be true, but it is still not nice to call his mother a bitch. | 1.4691 | 0.05339 | 162 | 103 | 42 | 17 |
247 | This is your brother from another mother. | 1.4691 | 0.04097 | 275 | 175 | 71 | 29 |
248 | Sit. | 1.4689 | 0.03995 | 305 | 198 | 71 | 36 |
249 | But a picture of you in that suit wouldn’t get half as many likes on instagram. | 1.4682 | 0.03908 | 267 | 163 | 83 | 21 |
250 | How could we know he would learn so much by watching your virtual classes? | 1.4676 | 0.04116 | 293 | 192 | 65 | 36 |
251 | And who else is daddy's good boy! | 1.4673 | 0.03618 | 306 | 186 | 97 | 23 |
252 | Because she's Ruth Beagle Ginsburg, that's why. | 1.4664 | 0.03893 | 298 | 189 | 79 | 30 |
253 | You need to understand. I always call him a good boy. | 1.4664 | 0.03922 | 298 | 190 | 77 | 31 |
254 | Let's face it, you didn't even use that suit. | 1.4664 | 0.04036 | 298 | 194 | 69 | 35 |
255 | His name IS Buster and he IS brown. | 1.4664 | 0.03969 | 268 | 166 | 79 | 23 |
256 | Now son, he’s only wearing your clothes for a while so daddy can mark him as a dependent. | 1.4655 | 0.03998 | 275 | 173 | 76 | 26 |
257 | Because he’s older than you. | 1.4653 | 0.04347 | 245 | 157 | 62 | 26 |
258 | You’re just mad because we named him Steve and you Fido. | 1.4644 | 0.03922 | 295 | 188 | 77 | 30 |
259 | Your mother and I want you to grow up bilingual. | 1.4644 | 0.03862 | 295 | 186 | 81 | 28 |
260 | Of course we wouldn't replace you with a beagle; a border collie, maybe. | 1.4644 | 0.03802 | 295 | 184 | 85 | 26 |
261 | Well if you listened the way he does, maybe you would get more treats and go to the park too! | 1.4644 | 0.03832 | 295 | 185 | 83 | 27 |
262 | Sure, he gets to sleep on our bed, but you get to keep your balls. | 1.4642 | 0.04143 | 293 | 194 | 62 | 37 |
263 | For the last time, you're BOTH good boys. | 1.4631 | 0.03804 | 298 | 187 | 84 | 27 |
264 | Well you can be man's best friend's best friend. | 1.4631 | 0.03863 | 298 | 189 | 80 | 29 |
265 | Trust me, you don't want to be "fixed" too. | 1.4631 | 0.04063 | 298 | 196 | 66 | 36 |
266 | At least he comes when I call. | 1.4626 | 0.03804 | 281 | 173 | 86 | 22 |
267 | You're my son. He's my best friend. | 1.4626 | 0.04018 | 294 | 191 | 70 | 33 |
268 | Shake...Shake...Goood boy. | 1.4626 | 0.03901 | 294 | 187 | 78 | 29 |
269 | See Jimmy, even Cocoa knows you need to dress up to visit Grandma. | 1.4621 | 0.03657 | 290 | 176 | 94 | 20 |
270 | Son, I didn’t write the rules. He gets treats, you get positive parenting strategies. | 1.4621 | 0.03879 | 290 | 183 | 80 | 27 |
271 | Today is your brother’s turn to choose lunch, so raccoon carcass it is. | 1.4618 | 0.04478 | 262 | 177 | 49 | 36 |
272 | It doesn’t matter if you were born first. He’s your older brother by 48 years. | 1.4608 | 0.03695 | 293 | 180 | 91 | 22 |
273 | Stop complaining. You always hated that outfit. | 1.4605 | 0.03959 | 291 | 187 | 74 | 30 |
274 | Hey come on, it didn’t fit you anymore anyway. | 1.4605 | 0.03869 | 291 | 184 | 80 | 27 |
275 | The difference is he has papers. | 1.4601 | 0.04179 | 276 | 181 | 63 | 32 |
276 | Yes, Billy, we're taking you to the pound. We drew straws, remember? | 1.4595 | 0.04348 | 259 | 171 | 57 | 31 |
277 | Actually, he rescued us. | 1.4593 | 0.04598 | 209 | 133 | 56 | 20 |
278 | Can you give Charlie's bottom a nice sniff hello? | 1.4593 | 0.04376 | 270 | 182 | 52 | 36 |
279 | Yes, you are a good boy. He's just better. | 1.4593 | 0.04215 | 270 | 177 | 62 | 31 |
280 | Okay, okay, I'll bag your poop too...will that make it fair? | 1.4593 | 0.04248 | 270 | 178 | 60 | 32 |
281 | We have to act like he's your brother so we can claim him for an extra $600 | 1.4593 | 0.04199 | 270 | 184 | 51 | 35 |
282 | Hey, it was working until Grandma found her glasses. | 1.4591 | 0.03836 | 281 | 175 | 83 | 23 |
283 | Well, we had him before we had you. | 1.4577 | 0.04160 | 260 | 167 | 67 | 26 |
284 | Guess who got into that exclusive K-4. | 1.4577 | 0.03667 | 260 | 174 | 61 | 25 |
285 | Of course, you'll get a suit, once you're potty trained too. | 1.4574 | 0.03924 | 282 | 179 | 77 | 26 |
286 | Ok, now change your brother back. | 1.4568 | 0.04093 | 278 | 181 | 67 | 30 |
287 | Yes, I know it's not fair that he gets to pee wherever he wants | 1.4568 | 0.04061 | 278 | 180 | 69 | 29 |
288 | Look, let's just say if I did have a favorite it wouldn't be the one who's throwing a tantrum. | 1.4565 | 0.04017 | 276 | 177 | 72 | 27 |
289 | I promise you, son, Fred's vaccine 'side-effect' is a one-off. | 1.4558 | 0.04039 | 283 | 184 | 69 | 30 |
290 | Come on Tommy, you know that deep inside you want to be a good boy too. | 1.4556 | 0.03944 | 270 | 170 | 77 | 23 |
291 | He gets nicer clothes because he's already potty trained. | 1.4556 | 0.04115 | 270 | 175 | 67 | 28 |
292 | I promise we'll play catch right after your little brother's violin recital. | 1.4549 | 0.04158 | 244 | 154 | 69 | 21 |
293 | I know you really loved Spot from the pound but Ignatius has been bred to get you into the most prestigious preschools. | 1.4549 | 0.04071 | 277 | 180 | 68 | 29 |
294 | He’s your brother from another mother | 1.4545 | 0.03819 | 286 | 180 | 82 | 24 |
295 | It was an honest election. You lost. Accepting that this happens is part of growing up. | 1.4545 | 0.04421 | 242 | 159 | 56 | 27 |
296 | I don’t care what you think you saw, Johnny. Dogs don’t play poker. | 1.4545 | 0.04078 | 264 | 169 | 70 | 25 |
297 | It’s not personal, son. We can only afford prep school for one of you, and St. Bernard’s is cheaper. | 1.4542 | 0.04028 | 284 | 185 | 69 | 30 |
298 | Show him a ball and he’ll totally forget about the dress code. | 1.4542 | 0.03947 | 273 | 173 | 76 | 24 |
299 | And when the pandemic is over you can play with human kids again. | 1.4542 | 0.03947 | 273 | 173 | 76 | 24 |
300 | We don’t ALWAYS go to the dog park. | 1.4539 | 0.03791 | 271 | 167 | 85 | 19 |
301 | Billy,you chase the ball. We don‘t want Fido to get dirty. | 1.4538 | 0.04229 | 260 | 170 | 62 | 28 |
302 | You just have to call Taco “Theodore” until we get off the plane, Son. | 1.4535 | 0.04035 | 258 | 163 | 73 | 22 |
303 | Well, opposable thumbs, and I'm sure there are other things, if you'll just give me a minute. | 1.4518 | 0.05095 | 166 | 106 | 45 | 15 |
304 | No, I didn't cheat on your mom. He's adopted! | 1.4518 | 0.04362 | 228 | 146 | 61 | 21 |
305 | Next time you can pee on the hydrant. | 1.4516 | 0.04188 | 248 | 159 | 66 | 23 |
306 | I could only afford to send one of you to school, and he seemed more excited about it. | 1.4511 | 0.04019 | 266 | 170 | 72 | 24 |
307 | Well, you don't expect him to run around naked, do you? | 1.4511 | 0.04054 | 266 | 171 | 70 | 25 |
308 | You wanted a dog for Christmas and your mom wants another kid, it's a win-win. | 1.4508 | 0.03969 | 264 | 167 | 75 | 22 |
309 | He has 13k Instagram followers. How many do you have? | 1.4508 | 0.03932 | 264 | 166 | 77 | 21 |
310 | He saw you in the window! | 1.4506 | 0.04463 | 233 | 153 | 55 | 25 |
311 | Listen, you wanted him. Now that lockdown is over he is going to school with you. | 1.4502 | 0.04151 | 251 | 161 | 67 | 23 |
312 | I know you wanted a baby brother but you've got to admit he's kinda cute. | 1.4500 | 0.05852 | 140 | 93 | 31 | 16 |
313 | You may be my son, but he’s my best friend. | 1.4500 | 0.03808 | 280 | 176 | 82 | 22 |
314 | See, Reggie doesn't mind wearing the preschool uniform. | 1.4498 | 0.03987 | 269 | 177 | 65 | 27 |
315 | I think we're sending the wrong family member to obedience school. | 1.4496 | 0.04107 | 258 | 166 | 68 | 24 |
316 | I was talking about HIS mother...not yours. | 1.4496 | 0.04216 | 258 | 169 | 62 | 27 |
317 | Don’t make me get your leash. | 1.4496 | 0.04180 | 258 | 168 | 64 | 26 |
318 | Who's a barely tolerable boy? Yes, you are! | 1.4494 | 0.04180 | 267 | 176 | 62 | 29 |
319 | He's going to prep school, you're going to obedience school. | 1.4494 | 0.03915 | 247 | 152 | 79 | 16 |
320 | You'll get your suit too once you graduate from obedience school | 1.4491 | 0.03921 | 265 | 166 | 77 | 21 |
321 | O.K. so you're not identical twins | 1.4486 | 0.04288 | 243 | 158 | 61 | 24 |
322 | "C'mon, sport. It's his week to pick, and you know how much he loves the Dutch masters exhibit." | 1.4483 | 0.04073 | 261 | 168 | 69 | 24 |
323 | Remember, he thinks you think he’s a dog. | 1.4480 | 0.04084 | 250 | 159 | 70 | 21 |
324 | Cheer up. Every dog has his day. | 1.4479 | 0.04058 | 259 | 166 | 70 | 23 |
325 | I promise you'll be in the next family photograph. | 1.4479 | 0.04058 | 259 | 166 | 70 | 23 |
326 | We don’t love Spot more, we just like him more. | 1.4479 | 0.03946 | 259 | 163 | 76 | 20 |
327 | He's just dressing for the job he wants. | 1.4472 | 0.04288 | 246 | 161 | 60 | 25 |
328 | “It’s not my fault your aunt wanted him to be Ring-Bearer.” | 1.4472 | 0.04210 | 246 | 159 | 64 | 23 |
329 | You heard the vet - we needed a dog that's better suited than you. Or was it better suited for you...? | 1.4471 | 0.04937 | 170 | 108 | 48 | 14 |
330 | What? You wanted a little brother and you wanted a puppy! | 1.4470 | 0.04074 | 264 | 171 | 68 | 25 |
331 | When you learn to be obedient, you can go to Catholic School too! | 1.4470 | 0.04144 | 264 | 173 | 64 | 27 |
332 | Son, it’s 2020, are you even surprised by this? | 1.4463 | 0.04456 | 242 | 162 | 52 | 28 |
333 | Look. Grandma's a bit confused. But if you're nice maybe she'll pay for your college, too. | 1.4462 | 0.04225 | 251 | 164 | 62 | 25 |
334 | Circumcision is for little boys only, silly. We castrated Spot." | 1.4462 | 0.04398 | 260 | 177 | 50 | 33 |
335 | if he can learn to stop drinking from the toilet, so can you! | 1.4457 | 0.04250 | 258 | 171 | 59 | 28 |
336 | Jared and Ivanka have to move and they cant keep him | 1.4454 | 0.04269 | 238 | 154 | 62 | 22 |
337 | Let's play who's a good boy. | 1.4453 | 0.04165 | 256 | 167 | 64 | 25 |
338 | Does Winston look like he would eat your homework? | 1.4449 | 0.04460 | 227 | 149 | 55 | 23 |
339 | Why can’t you be more like your brother? | 1.4436 | 0.04152 | 257 | 168 | 64 | 25 |
340 | I told you: He's not my favorite. Now let's play fetch! | 1.4436 | 0.04225 | 257 | 170 | 60 | 27 |
341 | It's just until humans are allowed to socialize again. | 1.4426 | 0.03943 | 244 | 152 | 76 | 16 |
342 | I don't compare you. I contrast you.” | 1.4425 | 0.04646 | 226 | 153 | 46 | 27 |
343 | I’m not saying you and your brother have to be best friends, but the least you could do is throw him a bone. | 1.4422 | 0.04069 | 251 | 161 | 69 | 21 |
344 | Timmy, we no longer say, "Here, boy." Spike prefers the non-binary, "Here, dog." Especially since their surgery. | 1.4422 | 0.04371 | 251 | 169 | 53 | 29 |
345 | Okay, if it will make you happy, daddy will put your poop in a bag, too | 1.4422 | 0.04444 | 251 | 171 | 49 | 31 |
346 | It looks like someone could use a lesson in being a good boy ! | 1.4421 | 0.04290 | 233 | 151 | 61 | 21 |
347 | If it weren’t for him, you’d still be in that well. | 1.4417 | 0.04200 | 240 | 155 | 64 | 21 |
348 | It's okay, roll over doesn't come naturally to everyone | 1.4412 | 0.04267 | 238 | 155 | 61 | 22 |
349 | And hey, in just a couple of dog years you'll be an only child again! | 1.4409 | 0.04111 | 254 | 165 | 66 | 23 |
350 | It’s 2021 now son, we don’t discriminate on the basis of species | 1.4409 | 0.04149 | 254 | 166 | 64 | 24 |
351 | Don’t sulk Timmy, there’s room for two good boys in our family. | 1.4408 | 0.04336 | 245 | 163 | 56 | 26 |
352 | Come on. Try! If he can walk, you can bark. | 1.4400 | 0.04272 | 250 | 166 | 58 | 26 |
353 | But you didn’t like that suit when it fit you | 1.4400 | 0.04119 | 250 | 162 | 66 | 22 |
354 | Max is sorry he sniffed your butthole. | 1.4400 | 0.04383 | 250 | 169 | 52 | 29 |
355 | Don’t worry Timmy, you’re both adopted | 1.4400 | 0.04119 | 250 | 162 | 66 | 22 |
356 | Here's a lesson for you, kid. He dressed for success and won Best in Show. | 1.4397 | 0.04430 | 232 | 154 | 54 | 24 |
357 | C'mon now . . . shake hands, smell each other's butts and be friends again. | 1.4385 | 0.04230 | 244 | 160 | 61 | 23 |
358 | Well, yes in fact, he IS a royal son of a bitch. | 1.4385 | 0.04230 | 244 | 160 | 61 | 23 |
359 | Sorry, Jimmy. You’re my son, but Waldo’s my best friend. | 1.4384 | 0.04482 | 219 | 144 | 54 | 21 |
360 | Well, you’re my second best friend | 1.4381 | 0.04198 | 226 | 144 | 65 | 17 |
361 | I would call you a good boy too if you rolled over and wagged your tail when I come home. | 1.4381 | 0.04558 | 226 | 152 | 49 | 25 |
362 | It's complicated, but call him 'the brother from another mother.' | 1.4380 | 0.04090 | 242 | 155 | 68 | 19 |
363 | Come on Jimmy, mom and I needed a emotional support child. | 1.4380 | 0.04048 | 242 | 154 | 70 | 18 |
364 | Can you believe I got pants on the dog? 2021 is gonna be my year. | 1.4378 | 0.04665 | 201 | 132 | 50 | 19 |
365 | Come on now, Jefferey. Spike doesn't pee "weird", he just pees "differently". | 1.4375 | 0.04197 | 240 | 156 | 63 | 21 |
366 | Unfortunately, we can't afford college for both so we picked the smarter one. | 1.4375 | 0.04556 | 240 | 165 | 45 | 30 |
367 | You aren't going to win any Obedience awards with that attitude. | 1.4370 | 0.04137 | 238 | 153 | 66 | 19 |
368 | That’s just how he identifies today. | 1.4370 | 0.04264 | 238 | 156 | 60 | 22 |
369 | You don’t like his outfit? You should see the cat’s pajamas. | 1.4370 | 0.04346 | 238 | 158 | 56 | 24 |
370 | Come on now, I want you two to lick and make up | 1.4351 | 0.04291 | 239 | 158 | 58 | 23 |
371 | Sorry, Billy, I just don’t believe you saw him playing poker. He’s a dog for goodness’ sakes. | 1.4350 | 0.04468 | 223 | 148 | 53 | 22 |
372 | You were an accident. The dog was our choice. | 1.4350 | 0.04468 | 223 | 148 | 53 | 22 |
373 | You'll learn to love obedience school, like Ralph did. | 1.4346 | 0.04651 | 214 | 144 | 47 | 23 |
374 | No, I don’t love him more, I just think he has more executive potential. | 1.4340 | 0.04548 | 235 | 161 | 46 | 28 |
375 | Because you've outgrown it, that's why. | 1.4338 | 0.04288 | 219 | 141 | 61 | 17 |
376 | Think of it this way. You haven't lost a pet. You've gained a brother. | 1.4338 | 0.04139 | 219 | 138 | 67 | 14 |
377 | Maybe if you were more like your brother... | 1.4338 | 0.04337 | 219 | 142 | 59 | 18 |
378 | Don't worry, he's not my son. He's my best friend. | 1.4336 | 0.04379 | 226 | 149 | 56 | 21 |
379 | Alfie passed agility, flyball, rally, field scent trials, Rorschach's, and scored highest on the Stanford-Binet scale, isn't that great Oliver... | 1.4335 | 0.04733 | 203 | 136 | 46 | 21 |
380 | I know he's not a real boy, but you have to admit he looks good when he's dressed up. | 1.4335 | 0.04284 | 233 | 153 | 59 | 21 |
381 | Yes Billy I do love him more but you’ll outlive him. | 1.4335 | 0.04327 | 233 | 154 | 57 | 22 |
382 | But if Tippy wears the outfit, Daddy's video could go viral! | 1.4329 | 0.04266 | 231 | 151 | 60 | 20 |
383 | See...this is what a good boy looks like. | 1.4329 | 0.04482 | 231 | 156 | 50 | 25 |
384 | He really didn't steal your homework . He ate it. | 1.4324 | 0.04480 | 222 | 148 | 52 | 22 |
385 | If he can walk this far on two feet, so can you. | 1.4324 | 0.04388 | 222 | 146 | 56 | 20 |
386 | When you get a million hits on YouTube, you get to pick the restaurant | 1.4316 | 0.04139 | 234 | 151 | 65 | 18 |
387 | But the suit doesn’t fit you anymore! | 1.4316 | 0.04227 | 234 | 153 | 61 | 20 |
388 | I just want to find 11,780 votes. | 1.4306 | 0.04799 | 216 | 150 | 39 | 27 |
389 | Hey little man,not everyone can get into Harvard. | 1.4298 | 0.04304 | 228 | 150 | 58 | 20 |
390 | Well, he gets to watch YouTube because he makes so much money on YouTube | 1.4298 | 0.04393 | 228 | 152 | 54 | 22 |
391 | I told you: adopting Reggie has given us the chance to correct the parenting mistakes we've made with you. | 1.4294 | 0.04924 | 170 | 111 | 45 | 14 |
392 | Sorry son. Only one of you can go to college, and Fido shows more promise. | 1.4292 | 0.04331 | 226 | 149 | 57 | 20 |
393 | You're right he's my favorite now because I don't have to do common core math with him! | 1.4292 | 0.04465 | 226 | 152 | 51 | 23 |
394 | Don't be a baby...it is YOUR TURN to fetch. | 1.4292 | 0.04465 | 226 | 152 | 51 | 23 |
395 | You’re sorry that we traded your sister for a dog? | 1.4292 | 0.04421 | 226 | 151 | 53 | 22 |
396 | When you can catch a ball as well as your brother, you'll get a new suit too... | 1.4292 | 0.04331 | 226 | 149 | 57 | 20 |
397 | Well, you wouldn't wear it. | 1.4292 | 0.04145 | 226 | 145 | 65 | 16 |
398 | I’m not trying to play favorites, Bobby, but you have to pick up your own poop. | 1.4292 | 0.04509 | 226 | 153 | 49 | 24 |
399 | Gee, Timmy, it's not that we love you less; it's just that we love him more." | 1.4286 | 0.04538 | 224 | 152 | 48 | 24 |
400 | Ok, very funny Merlin, now please say the magic word to turn him back into your brother. | 1.4286 | 0.04575 | 196 | 128 | 52 | 16 |
401 | But this dog is suited for you! | 1.4286 | 0.04753 | 189 | 125 | 47 | 17 |
402 | Not only is he better behaved, he is better dressed. | 1.4280 | 0.04156 | 236 | 154 | 63 | 19 |
403 | Don’t sulk, Bobby. You can tinkle on the next fire hydrant. | 1.4279 | 0.04291 | 222 | 145 | 59 | 18 |
404 | Because if you do, Daddy will get his research grant. | 1.4279 | 0.04477 | 222 | 149 | 51 | 22 |
405 | Yes I know ... but this little soirée is just for him and his obedience-school colleagues | 1.4279 | 0.04186 | 215 | 142 | 56 | 17 |
406 | It’s ok, bud. Some dogs just aren’t into sports. | 1.4279 | 0.04115 | 208 | 130 | 67 | 11 |
407 | We'll go to the playground another day, Oscar has to go to his piano lesson now. | 1.4265 | 0.04501 | 204 | 134 | 53 | 17 |
408 | He’s a good boy. You were not. | 1.4261 | 0.04319 | 230 | 153 | 56 | 21 |
409 | You're right Timmy! Your brother IS a son of a bitch! | 1.4260 | 0.04506 | 223 | 151 | 49 | 23 |
410 | Hey, look on the bright side, at least you still have your nuts | 1.4260 | 0.04595 | 223 | 153 | 45 | 25 |
411 | Well son, some dogs play fetch and others play bridge. | 1.4260 | 0.04370 | 223 | 148 | 55 | 20 |
412 | Son, I know you want to be like your brother but you can't go wagging your 'tail' in public | 1.4253 | 0.04444 | 221 | 148 | 52 | 21 |
413 | Actually, you're both adopted! | 1.4253 | 0.04397 | 221 | 147 | 54 | 20 |
414 | This is your brother, Rover. He chooses to identify as a canine, we must accept his decision. | 1.4253 | 0.04397 | 221 | 147 | 54 | 20 |
415 | Don't be embarrassed, Timmy. Barking at firetrucks runs in the family. | 1.4253 | 0.04444 | 221 | 148 | 52 | 21 |
416 | If it makes you feel less jealous, you're BOTH adopted! | 1.4253 | 0.04625 | 221 | 152 | 44 | 25 |
417 | I promise, your turn to fetch the stick is next | 1.4253 | 0.04057 | 221 | 140 | 68 | 13 |
418 | I'm sorry, buddy, but those DNA ancestry tests don't lie. | 1.4251 | 0.04454 | 207 | 136 | 54 | 17 |
419 | Good news. You’re not the favorite anymore, but we decided to keep you anyway. | 1.4251 | 0.04558 | 207 | 138 | 50 | 19 |
420 | Is that a ‘best in show’ kind of smile? | 1.4247 | 0.04682 | 186 | 122 | 49 | 15 |
421 | He says jeans and a tee shirt just isn't him. | 1.4247 | 0.04557 | 186 | 120 | 53 | 13 |
422 | But your new brother really IS a son of a bitch. | 1.4247 | 0.04611 | 219 | 150 | 45 | 24 |
423 | Who needs a belly-rub? | 1.4247 | 0.04330 | 219 | 144 | 57 | 18 |
424 | I thought I was taking him to get neutered - not tutored. | 1.4247 | 0.04330 | 219 | 144 | 57 | 18 |
425 | Let's try again: Now who is a good boy? | 1.4247 | 0.04426 | 219 | 146 | 53 | 20 |
426 | Of course some of those "good boy" comments were for you. | 1.4247 | 0.04330 | 219 | 144 | 57 | 18 |
427 | Can you tell Fido you’re sorry for biting him? | 1.4247 | 0.04281 | 219 | 143 | 59 | 17 |
428 | I don't love him more he just has seven birthdays a year | 1.4247 | 0.04656 | 219 | 151 | 43 | 25 |
429 | He gets to wear a suit because he's got a job. | 1.4242 | 0.04476 | 231 | 158 | 48 | 25 |
430 | Maybe if you didn't throw Donald Trump level tantrums you'd get a nice suit too. | 1.4236 | 0.04777 | 203 | 139 | 42 | 22 |
431 | You can also get a new suit once you’re toilet trained. | 1.4236 | 0.04460 | 203 | 133 | 54 | 16 |
432 | Should we name the new puppy "Deduction"? | 1.4235 | 0.04739 | 196 | 132 | 45 | 19 |
433 | Don't worry. He'll never be able to fill your shoes. | 1.4234 | 0.04143 | 222 | 143 | 64 | 15 |
434 | "Of Course Billy! Mommy and Daddy like Fluffy better than you. He's paper trained and is always happy to see us. | 1.4234 | 0.04428 | 222 | 149 | 52 | 21 |
435 | Show him you’re well bred too. | 1.4233 | 0.04483 | 215 | 144 | 51 | 20 |
436 | He’s your brother because your mother’s a bitch. | 1.4233 | 0.04856 | 215 | 152 | 35 | 28 |
437 | Obedience school will be fun! | 1.4233 | 0.04435 | 215 | 143 | 53 | 19 |
438 | Hey look on the bright side kid,,,,could’ve been a cat | 1.4233 | 0.04385 | 215 | 142 | 55 | 18 |
439 | He can’t help it. He’s a purebred. | 1.4229 | 0.04750 | 175 | 114 | 48 | 13 |
440 | Molly is technically 21, so we're leaving her in charge while we're out. | 1.4225 | 0.04663 | 187 | 123 | 49 | 15 |
441 | Be nice to your cousin. He leaves for Eton in a week. | 1.4221 | 0.04465 | 199 | 130 | 54 | 15 |
442 | Use your words. | 1.4220 | 0.04243 | 218 | 142 | 60 | 16 |
443 | I’m sorry. You’re a good boy too, sometimes.” | 1.4220 | 0.04243 | 218 | 142 | 60 | 16 |
444 | Well you didn't like it and it suits him fine. | 1.4220 | 0.04532 | 218 | 148 | 48 | 22 |
445 | I know you’re a little jealous - but it’s not every day your brother graduates from obedience school. | 1.4220 | 0.04485 | 218 | 147 | 50 | 21 |
446 | Yes, he gets to wear a suit, but YOU don’t have to get fixed. | 1.4220 | 0.04625 | 218 | 150 | 44 | 24 |
447 | See, Spanky isn't ashamed to hold his father's hand in public. | 1.4217 | 0.05000 | 166 | 110 | 42 | 14 |
448 | Come on, Timmy, who's a good boy? | 1.4215 | 0.04320 | 223 | 148 | 56 | 19 |
449 | Stop calling your sister "bitch". | 1.4215 | 0.06402 | 121 | 85 | 21 | 15 |
450 | Who's not a good boy? | 1.4213 | 0.04270 | 216 | 141 | 59 | 16 |
451 | You wanted a puppy. You wanted a little brother. Now you have both! | 1.4213 | 0.04418 | 216 | 144 | 53 | 19 |
452 | Mommy and Daddy love you both equally. We give Sniffer special gifts because he doesn't bite. | 1.4213 | 0.04270 | 216 | 141 | 59 | 16 |
453 | Hey son, how about we play “go-fetch” after I take Skippy to his cello recital? | 1.4213 | 0.04369 | 216 | 143 | 55 | 18 |
454 | Your mother and I couldn't agree, so we compromised. | 1.4194 | 0.04800 | 186 | 125 | 44 | 17 |
455 | Timmy, this is Miss Lillie. She is going to work with you on your Cognitive Behavior, and if you fail to listen, she will bite you. | 1.4194 | 0.06070 | 124 | 85 | 26 | 13 |
456 | Let me explain the difference between a literal good boy and a figurative good boy. | 1.4194 | 0.04354 | 217 | 144 | 55 | 18 |
457 | 'Your brother was just trying to be nice when he sniffed your butt!" | 1.4190 | 0.04557 | 210 | 142 | 48 | 20 |
458 | Now apologize to Buddy for eating his homework. | 1.4188 | 0.04469 | 191 | 124 | 54 | 13 |
459 | Yes, of course you’re my second favorite. | 1.4188 | 0.04710 | 191 | 128 | 46 | 17 |
460 | After Mom left, I needed to find someone a bit more loyal, son. | 1.4188 | 0.04739 | 191 | 131 | 41 | 19 |
461 | You cannot have a treat for peeing outside. We’ve gone over this! | 1.4188 | 0.04768 | 191 | 129 | 44 | 18 |
462 | Don't worry buddy. He may be able to wear your clothes but he can never fill your shoes! | 1.4186 | 0.04381 | 215 | 143 | 54 | 18 |
463 | Cheer up son! We'll go to the human park next week! | 1.4186 | 0.04332 | 215 | 142 | 56 | 17 |
464 | Trust me, you and Little Dog Fauntleroy are going to great friends. | 1.4186 | 0.04431 | 215 | 144 | 52 | 19 |
465 | When you graduate from obedience school, you can dress up too! | 1.4186 | 0.04528 | 215 | 146 | 48 | 21 |
466 | You only have to share a room until his mother gets home from chasing that garbage truck. | 1.4186 | 0.04623 | 215 | 148 | 44 | 23 |
467 | Don’t be silly. Your mother and I love you both equally! | 1.4186 | 0.04431 | 215 | 144 | 52 | 19 |
468 | Yes, he's adopted. But Mommy and Daddy love him just the same as we do you. | 1.4183 | 0.04537 | 208 | 140 | 49 | 19 |
469 | Don't cry. Now, Daddy can get his full $1200 stimulus. | 1.4179 | 0.04541 | 201 | 134 | 50 | 17 |
470 | Now now Johnny, Jack won the frisbee toss fair and square. | 1.4177 | 0.04770 | 158 | 101 | 48 | 9 |
471 | Before I married your mommy I was married to a real bitch. That makes him your half-brother, son. | 1.4176 | 0.04997 | 182 | 125 | 38 | 19 |
472 | Because unlike you he never poops in his pants. | 1.4174 | 0.04482 | 218 | 148 | 49 | 21 |
473 | They don’t fit you and we don’t live in London anymore. ! | 1.4172 | 0.04831 | 163 | 106 | 46 | 11 |
474 | Well, yes, I do love him more. | 1.4171 | 0.04573 | 199 | 133 | 49 | 17 |
475 | With just a little more effort, you could be a good boy, too. | 1.4171 | 0.04589 | 211 | 144 | 46 | 21 |
476 | You only have to tell the teacher he is your brother "Fido" one day more - the dog walker will be back on Monday! | 1.4171 | 0.04439 | 211 | 141 | 52 | 18 |
477 | If he can hold it so can you!!! | 1.4171 | 0.04388 | 211 | 140 | 54 | 17 |
478 | I know it's not fair that your sister gets to bite the neighbor, but she also doesn't get to eat chocolate. | 1.4167 | 0.04881 | 168 | 111 | 44 | 13 |
479 | You never wear it, so why shouldn't he? | 1.4162 | 0.04629 | 185 | 122 | 49 | 14 |
480 | So now you want to wear the suit | 1.4161 | 0.05028 | 161 | 107 | 39 | 13 |
481 | Well Jason,not everyone can be man’s best friend. | 1.4159 | 0.04541 | 214 | 146 | 47 | 21 |
482 | define normal. | 1.4157 | 0.04951 | 178 | 121 | 40 | 17 |
483 | After the family re-org you'll be reporting directly to Sparky. | 1.4157 | 0.04846 | 166 | 109 | 45 | 12 |
484 | Don't worry Timmy, when school reopens, you'll get the proper training too. | 1.4155 | 0.04498 | 207 | 139 | 50 | 18 |
485 | OK, maybe he can retrieve a ball faster than you but you can reflect on the meaning of life. | 1.4155 | 0.04445 | 207 | 138 | 52 | 17 |
486 | If you'll just play along Daddy will split the extra stimulus check with you. | 1.4140 | 0.04734 | 186 | 125 | 45 | 16 |
487 | I'm sorry Timmy, but it's true. You were adopted. | 1.4140 | 0.04672 | 186 | 124 | 47 | 15 |
488 | No, this time he gets to be Christopher Robin and you are Pooh Bear. | 1.4138 | 0.04396 | 203 | 133 | 54 | 15 |
489 | I was just kidding. He's not your long lost twin brother. | 1.4138 | 0.04139 | 203 | 132 | 58 | 11 |
490 | Listen, you wanted a puppy and your mother wanted another kid, this is a win for everybody. | 1.4138 | 0.04768 | 203 | 141 | 40 | 22 |
491 | You have to admit—it looks better on him. | 1.4136 | 0.04586 | 191 | 127 | 49 | 15 |
492 | He's your brother by another mother. | 1.4136 | 0.04646 | 191 | 128 | 47 | 16 |
493 | But you are better in math. Let him win in stick retrieving! | 1.4136 | 0.04646 | 191 | 128 | 47 | 16 |
494 | This one's a terror and this one's a terrier! | 1.4136 | 0.04763 | 191 | 130 | 43 | 18 |
495 | Don't be jealous. You'll wear a suit for your bar mitzvah, too! | 1.4129 | 0.04591 | 201 | 136 | 47 | 18 |
496 | We'll get ice cream as soon as you show me unconditional love! Yes, we will! | 1.4129 | 0.04481 | 201 | 134 | 51 | 16 |
497 | Please help Daddy pretend this is a normal playdate. | 1.4127 | 0.04680 | 189 | 127 | 46 | 16 |
498 | Don’t be angry son, he identifies as human. | 1.4126 | 0.04405 | 206 | 137 | 53 | 16 |
499 | You don't see JibJab complaining about getting dressed up for dinner at Nana's. | 1.4121 | 0.04869 | 182 | 124 | 41 | 17 |
500 | Please be patient, like your sister, while daddy finds his glasses! | 1.4121 | 0.04869 | 182 | 124 | 41 | 17 |
501 | See! Your sister was ok with her covid vaccine shot | 1.4121 | 0.04941 | 199 | 141 | 34 | 24 |
502 | I thought you hated that suit. | 1.4121 | 0.04455 | 199 | 132 | 52 | 15 |
503 | Keep misbehaving and we'll give him your bed too. | 1.4121 | 0.04623 | 199 | 135 | 46 | 18 |
504 | Look Johnny, your brother is just fine, so let's get you vaccinated, too. | 1.4121 | 0.04678 | 199 | 136 | 44 | 19 |
505 | Son, could you fetch his loafers? | 1.4121 | 0.04623 | 199 | 135 | 46 | 18 |
506 | You’re a good boy too, Billy. You just remind me of all my failures. | 1.4118 | 0.05115 | 170 | 117 | 36 | 17 |
507 | What's wrong? You asked for a haute dog. | 1.4118 | 0.05047 | 170 | 116 | 38 | 16 |
508 | It's ok, son. He just wants to take you for a walk. | 1.4108 | 0.04749 | 185 | 125 | 44 | 16 |
509 | Seriously, where did you hide your brother’s frisbee? | 1.4105 | 0.04660 | 190 | 128 | 46 | 16 |
510 | That gender reveal cake filled with liver treats makes a lot more sense now, right? | 1.4105 | 0.04660 | 190 | 128 | 46 | 16 |
511 | Be nice. He's a major YouTube influencer with 21 million followers. | 1.4096 | 0.05203 | 166 | 115 | 34 | 17 |
512 | Who's a not-as-good boy? | 1.4091 | 0.04692 | 198 | 136 | 43 | 19 |
513 | But look what obedience school did for him. | 1.4091 | 0.04410 | 198 | 131 | 53 | 14 |
514 | Because he's dressed for success, that's why | 1.4091 | 0.04581 | 198 | 134 | 47 | 17 |
515 | Well you see Billy, he is always happy to see me. | 1.4091 | 0.04352 | 198 | 130 | 55 | 13 |
516 | But you’re my favorite *human* child. | 1.4091 | 0.04637 | 198 | 135 | 45 | 18 |
517 | The suit just fits him better. | 1.4089 | 0.04712 | 203 | 141 | 41 | 21 |
518 | I promised Barkley a new boy, but if you don't behave, it's back to the shelter. | 1.4082 | 0.04556 | 196 | 132 | 48 | 16 |
519 | Be nice, he's my best friend! | 1.4074 | 0.04614 | 189 | 127 | 47 | 15 |
520 | How would you feel if I made you chase a stick? | 1.4072 | 0.04530 | 194 | 130 | 49 | 15 |
521 | Once you're house broken, you get a treat too. | 1.4072 | 0.04410 | 194 | 128 | 53 | 13 |
522 | Look, you said you wanted a dog. Your sister said she wanted a dress up doll. This is what we got. OK? | 1.4072 | 0.04588 | 194 | 131 | 47 | 16 |
523 | you're not a rescue animal, sweetie, we adopted you. | 1.4072 | 0.04349 | 194 | 127 | 55 | 12 |
524 | Hey now, what did we say about calling your sister the B word? | 1.4072 | 0.04588 | 194 | 136 | 39 | 19 |
525 | Who's an angry boy, huh? Who's an angry boy? You are ... yes, you are. | 1.4072 | 0.04530 | 194 | 130 | 49 | 15 |
526 | But to him, sniffing your friends’ butt is just a greeting.” | 1.4072 | 0.04410 | 194 | 128 | 53 | 13 |
527 | I know it's weird, but just be thankful your step-mom isn't a cat person. | 1.4072 | 0.04410 | 194 | 128 | 53 | 13 |
528 | He's a dog,he doesn't have to wear shoes! | 1.4072 | 0.04410 | 194 | 128 | 53 | 13 |
529 | Now...HOOSAGOODBOI!? | 1.4072 | 0.04646 | 194 | 132 | 45 | 17 |
530 | We're not playing favorites, we love you both the same. When you get to be 21, we'll buy you a new suit too. | 1.4070 | 0.04450 | 199 | 133 | 51 | 15 |
531 | Yes, it’s an expensive suit, but he got into law school and you didn’t. | 1.4070 | 0.04507 | 199 | 134 | 49 | 16 |
532 | You asked Santa for your puppy to be happy... And his dream is to be a tax attorney. | 1.4070 | 0.04833 | 199 | 140 | 37 | 22 |
533 | I'm still your paw. | 1.4062 | 0.04738 | 192 | 132 | 42 | 18 |
534 | Look, son, it's nothing personal. When we adopted you and Rufus, we knew we would only keep one of you, and surprisingly, you have a better return policy. | 1.4061 | 0.05362 | 165 | 117 | 29 | 19 |
535 | We went to the human park yesterday, so today we are going to the dog park. It’s only fair, Timmy. | 1.4056 | 0.05274 | 143 | 96 | 36 | 11 |
536 | But I can pick up more girls this way. | 1.4056 | 0.04837 | 180 | 123 | 41 | 16 |
537 | We've enrolled you in obedience training. Look what it's done for Spud! | 1.4056 | 0.04505 | 180 | 118 | 51 | 11 |
538 | Don't be jealous. He'll be dead by the time you're fourteen. | 1.4056 | 0.05026 | 180 | 126 | 35 | 19 |
539 | Jeremy! We apologize when we pull tails. | 1.4053 | 0.04654 | 190 | 129 | 45 | 16 |
540 | I know it was you that peed on the carpet. | 1.4053 | 0.04714 | 190 | 130 | 43 | 17 |
541 | Wait 'til you see your sister. | 1.4053 | 0.04888 | 190 | 133 | 37 | 20 |
542 | I don't care what you think...you CANNOT call his mother a bitch. | 1.4053 | 0.04714 | 190 | 130 | 43 | 17 |
543 | Yeah, well he says you ate his homework. | 1.4053 | 0.04831 | 190 | 132 | 39 | 19 |
544 | Come on, only a few more followers on TikTok and we can afford to send you to college. | 1.4053 | 0.04471 | 190 | 126 | 51 | 13 |
545 | He likes to watch Downton Abbey and you don't. | 1.4051 | 0.05082 | 158 | 107 | 38 | 13 |
546 | Now, which one of you peed on the floor? | 1.4049 | 0.05122 | 163 | 112 | 36 | 15 |
547 | Son, we've been over this. I don't have a favorite child! | 1.4044 | 0.04716 | 183 | 124 | 44 | 15 |
548 | Mom said to bring the well-dressed one to the party...so it must be deworming for you. | 1.4043 | 0.04627 | 188 | 127 | 46 | 15 |
549 | Since Rex listens to us, we’ve decided to enroll HIM in that expensive private school instead! | 1.4043 | 0.04688 | 188 | 128 | 44 | 16 |
550 | Because he’s a good boy, that’s why. | 1.4041 | 0.04361 | 193 | 127 | 54 | 12 |
551 | If you behave, I'll give you a treat too! | 1.4041 | 0.04718 | 193 | 133 | 42 | 18 |
552 | Don't worry, Timmy, if you work hard and get good grades, we can send you to Harvard, too. | 1.4041 | 0.04602 | 193 | 131 | 46 | 16 |
553 | Hey, I love you more. but a boy in a suit is just not going to take off on Tik Tok | 1.4041 | 0.04423 | 193 | 128 | 52 | 13 |
554 | It's dog years, Billy. He'll only be your baby brother for like, 6 months. | 1.4041 | 0.04483 | 193 | 129 | 50 | 14 |
555 | He is very sorry for eating your homework. | 1.4041 | 0.04718 | 193 | 133 | 42 | 18 |
556 | How many times did I tell you? Dress for the job you WANT. | 1.4041 | 0.04718 | 193 | 133 | 42 | 18 |
557 | Yes, you are my son and yes, we are humans. But Max's Instagram channel really took off during quarantine, so we listen to him now | 1.4041 | 0.04483 | 193 | 129 | 50 | 14 |
558 | Donald, you can't be Best In Show | 1.4041 | 0.05286 | 146 | 99 | 35 | 12 |
559 | Let’s try not to bite this nanny. We’re running out of options. | 1.4037 | 0.04936 | 161 | 108 | 41 | 12 |
560 | He'll stop biting if you call him a dachshund instead of a wiener dog. | 1.4037 | 0.04694 | 161 | 105 | 47 | 9 |
561 | But Sparky gives me unconditional love! | 1.4035 | 0.04878 | 171 | 116 | 41 | 14 |
562 | But you didn't want to go to church. | 1.4035 | 0.05017 | 171 | 118 | 37 | 16 |
563 | Max is teasing. You're not adopted. | 1.4035 | 0.04948 | 171 | 117 | 39 | 15 |
564 | Don't be upset... he thinks he's off to be "tutored"... | 1.4027 | 0.05628 | 149 | 106 | 26 | 17 |
565 | That’s just how he says ‘hi’ | 1.4022 | 0.04981 | 179 | 125 | 36 | 18 |
566 | And... in the contest for obedience,we have a winner!! | 1.4022 | 0.04655 | 179 | 120 | 46 | 13 |
567 | Who's a good boy? You're a good boy! | 1.4022 | 0.04587 | 179 | 119 | 48 | 12 |
568 | We promised your mother we'd get a dog that was already house trained. | 1.4021 | 0.04484 | 189 | 126 | 50 | 13 |
569 | You can have people food again as soon as you start dressing appropriately for dinner! | 1.4021 | 0.04583 | 194 | 132 | 46 | 16 |
570 | Now don’t be jealous. You’re a good boy too. | 1.4013 | 0.04855 | 157 | 104 | 43 | 10 |
571 | But you got to ride shotgun last time. | 1.4012 | 0.04989 | 162 | 110 | 39 | 13 |
572 | Now, don't tease your little brother. When you were his age, you were in short pants, too. | 1.4012 | 0.04884 | 167 | 113 | 41 | 13 |
573 | We can only afford Tuition for one Private School this year. | 1.4011 | 0.04763 | 187 | 129 | 41 | 17 |
574 | Cheer up, after the dog park, we'll go to the playground. | 1.4011 | 0.04579 | 187 | 126 | 47 | 14 |
575 | Donald, if you keep acting up, you'll never be president | 1.4000 | 0.04958 | 180 | 126 | 36 | 18 |
576 | You're going to love the kennel, Kenneth, the swap is for all of our own good. | 1.4000 | 0.04766 | 180 | 123 | 42 | 15 |
577 | You didn't want the prep school, so you get the obedience school. Fair's fair. | 1.4000 | 0.04483 | 185 | 123 | 50 | 12 |
578 | Now it's YOUR turn for obedience school. | 1.4000 | 0.04567 | 180 | 120 | 48 | 12 |
579 | We love you equally, but he was much easier to potty train. | 1.4000 | 0.04701 | 180 | 122 | 44 | 14 |
580 | Well, you wouldn't wear it so we thought.... | 1.4000 | 0.04708 | 160 | 105 | 46 | 9 |
581 | Yes, son, but remember that you will always be taller. And maybe someday you'll get a law degree too. | 1.4000 | 0.04675 | 185 | 126 | 44 | 15 |
582 | You're going to LOVE the little farm upstate! | 1.4000 | 0.04767 | 190 | 132 | 40 | 18 |
583 | You're just a white middle-class male like me, but Chauncey, he's well-bred, he's got a future. | 1.4000 | 0.04634 | 180 | 121 | 46 | 13 |
584 | Who's a good boy? No seriously, which one of you is a good boy? | 1.4000 | 0.04675 | 185 | 126 | 44 | 15 |
585 | That's just how they say, "Hello." | 1.4000 | 0.04675 | 185 | 126 | 44 | 15 |
586 | Fetching daddy's beer brings rewards, just ask Bailey. | 1.4000 | 0.04799 | 185 | 128 | 40 | 17 |
587 | It's a dog-eat-dog world out there, so Quimby has come to tutor you. | 1.4000 | 0.04612 | 185 | 125 | 46 | 14 |
588 | You are our biological son, not our rescue son. | 1.4000 | 0.04567 | 180 | 120 | 48 | 12 |
589 | No, we don’t love Winston more than you. It’s just that he’s better behaved. | 1.4000 | 0.04701 | 180 | 122 | 44 | 14 |
590 | You’re going to love the farm! So much room to run and play. | 1.4000 | 0.04920 | 185 | 130 | 36 | 19 |
591 | Ronnie, this is our new dog Spencer. From now on he’ll supervise all of your on-line learning, | 1.4000 | 0.04612 | 185 | 125 | 46 | 14 |
592 | Here's a hint - we're keeping the housebroken one. | 1.4000 | 0.04738 | 185 | 127 | 42 | 16 |
593 | You knew there was only enough money to send one of you to a private, four-year obedience school | 1.4000 | 0.04483 | 185 | 123 | 50 | 12 |
594 | Look at the bright side - you got the shoes. | 1.4000 | 0.04282 | 185 | 120 | 56 | 9 |
595 | Look at the bright side! He’s wearing the stupid suit Aunt Judy got you! | 1.3989 | 0.04559 | 188 | 127 | 47 | 14 |
596 | ...Why can't you just be more like your brother? | 1.3989 | 0.04433 | 188 | 125 | 51 | 12 |
597 | I told you we would get you a brother for Christmas. | 1.3989 | 0.04559 | 188 | 127 | 47 | 14 |
598 | We love you both equally, but his posts do get a lot more likes | 1.3978 | 0.04592 | 186 | 126 | 46 | 14 |
599 | Little Lord Spotleroy has social media because he’s old enough, remember? | 1.3978 | 0.04997 | 181 | 128 | 34 | 19 |
600 | Donald, this is the only volunteer who committed to play with you. | 1.3978 | 0.04680 | 181 | 123 | 44 | 14 |
601 | Maybe if you weren't so grumpy I'd call you a good boy too! | 1.3978 | 0.04680 | 181 | 123 | 44 | 14 |
602 | This is why we can’t leave dirty clothes on the floor. | 1.3978 | 0.04680 | 181 | 123 | 44 | 14 |
603 | K-9 school is formal. Pre-K is not. Just go with it. | 1.3978 | 0.04935 | 181 | 127 | 36 | 18 |
604 | It was Fido's Obedience School graduation. Don't worry, you'll go back to school some day, too! | 1.3978 | 0.04809 | 181 | 125 | 40 | 16 |
605 | Why are you so upset? It doesn’t fit you anymore. | 1.3977 | 0.04654 | 171 | 114 | 46 | 11 |
606 | Good dog! Bad boy! | 1.3975 | 0.04808 | 161 | 110 | 39 | 12 |
607 | Do you want to go into your crate? | 1.3974 | 0.05405 | 151 | 106 | 30 | 15 |
608 | Be nice. According to 23andMe he's your third cousin twice removed. | 1.3972 | 0.05315 | 141 | 96 | 34 | 11 |
609 | He’s your brother from my first wife. | 1.3967 | 0.04689 | 184 | 126 | 43 | 15 |
610 | You’re my second best friend. | 1.3967 | 0.04752 | 184 | 127 | 41 | 16 |
611 | It's only okay for dogs to sniff their friends' butts. | 1.3967 | 0.04752 | 184 | 127 | 41 | 16 |
612 | Puppy for your birthday; little brother for Christmas. These are the joys of being born on December 25th. | 1.3967 | 0.04689 | 184 | 126 | 43 | 15 |
613 | He's my best friend. You're still my son. | 1.3967 | 0.04752 | 184 | 127 | 41 | 16 |
614 | C'mon Joey, don't be mad, Rex wants you to be his emotional support human. | 1.3967 | 0.04689 | 184 | 126 | 43 | 15 |
615 | You know something, you’re right! You SHOULD be able to attend obedience school too! | 1.3967 | 0.04561 | 184 | 124 | 47 | 13 |
616 | Now Bobby, you know how you've always said you wanted a puppy and a little brother? | 1.3966 | 0.04781 | 179 | 123 | 41 | 15 |
617 | C'mon, Billy, you and I are jeans and t-shirt guys, not like 'mr. fancy pants' here. | 1.3966 | 0.04648 | 179 | 121 | 45 | 13 |
618 | Sorry son, only Mr. Kibbles gets rewarded for going potty outside. | 1.3966 | 0.04974 | 179 | 126 | 35 | 18 |
619 | Son, I just feel like his education is the better investment. | 1.3966 | 0.04715 | 179 | 122 | 43 | 14 |
620 | Well, he’s technically your older brother. | 1.3964 | 0.04689 | 169 | 113 | 45 | 11 |
621 | It’s ok Tommy, you just don’t remember when you were young enough to shit in the yard. | 1.3963 | 0.05162 | 164 | 115 | 33 | 16 |
622 | You'll get a treat too once you've graduated from obedience school. | 1.3956 | 0.04391 | 182 | 120 | 52 | 10 |
623 | Sorry son, but he's my best friend. | 1.3956 | 0.04974 | 182 | 129 | 34 | 19 |
624 | Don’t worry, you’re both rescues. | 1.3956 | 0.04460 | 182 | 121 | 50 | 11 |
625 | Well at least one of you comes from good breeding. | 1.3956 | 0.04594 | 182 | 123 | 46 | 13 |
626 | It’s okay son, you were BOTH adopted! | 1.3956 | 0.04659 | 182 | 124 | 44 | 14 |
627 | If you whine any more Donald, I dress you up like rufus. | 1.3951 | 0.04981 | 162 | 111 | 38 | 13 |
628 | Unlike you, he is potty trained and obeys commands. He gets to ride Shotgun | 1.3946 | 0.04605 | 185 | 126 | 45 | 14 |
629 | Guess who didn’t wet the bed last night? | 1.3944 | 0.04694 | 180 | 123 | 43 | 14 |
630 | A lot of doors will open with an obedience degree. | 1.3944 | 0.04491 | 180 | 120 | 49 | 11 |
631 | Do we need to send you to obedience school? Look at how well Bentley is behaving. | 1.3944 | 0.04824 | 180 | 125 | 39 | 16 |
632 | It's okay, buddy. We can't all have our tail in the back. | 1.3944 | 0.04694 | 180 | 123 | 43 | 14 |
633 | I don't think that "small wiener" comment was directed at you. | 1.3944 | 0.04824 | 180 | 125 | 39 | 16 |
634 | You never wore it, Andy and Sparky loves it. | 1.3944 | 0.04951 | 180 | 127 | 35 | 18 |
635 | Sorry, but your pre-school doesn’t have a best in show category.” | 1.3944 | 0.05014 | 180 | 128 | 33 | 19 |
636 | I don't care if he bit you first: say "I'm sorry". | 1.3944 | 0.04491 | 180 | 120 | 49 | 11 |
637 | I told you. Behave, or we're sending you to obedience school just like Bentley here. | 1.3944 | 0.04760 | 180 | 124 | 41 | 15 |
638 | We'll buy you nice clothes when you learn to go on the paper | 1.3944 | 0.04888 | 180 | 126 | 37 | 17 |
639 | I set up this playdate & you don’t have to wear your mask! | 1.3944 | 0.04760 | 180 | 124 | 41 | 15 |
640 | You just have to accept it, not everyone looks good in Thom Browne. | 1.3941 | 0.04957 | 170 | 118 | 37 | 15 |
641 | Jimmy, your teacher was upset because YOU pooped on the ground also. | 1.3939 | 0.04991 | 165 | 114 | 37 | 14 |
642 | C'mon Timmy, if Baxter can wear it to church then so can you." | 1.3938 | 0.05023 | 160 | 110 | 37 | 13 |
643 | I told you. I do NOT have a favorite. | 1.3934 | 0.04639 | 183 | 125 | 44 | 14 |
644 | Daddy confused 'tutor' and 'neuter', but I said I was sorry. | 1.3934 | 0.04829 | 183 | 128 | 38 | 17 |
645 | Cheer up. At least now you’ll have a friend at obedience school. | 1.3934 | 0.04639 | 183 | 125 | 44 | 14 |
646 | That's the deal. He won the race, he gets to wear the suit. | 1.3934 | 0.04639 | 183 | 125 | 44 | 14 |
647 | Son, you had your shot and wouldn't wear the outfit, so we gave it to Max. | 1.3933 | 0.05258 | 150 | 104 | 33 | 13 |
648 | Ok, we’ll get ice cream right after his piano recital. | 1.3933 | 0.04628 | 178 | 123 | 41 | 14 |
649 | Now Billy, Fido called 'shotgun' first. You'll just have to ride in the back of the pickup. | 1.3931 | 0.05297 | 145 | 100 | 33 | 12 |
650 | I think we all know which one of you has been a good boy | 1.3929 | 0.04779 | 168 | 114 | 42 | 12 |
651 | We love you, but he can fetch. | 1.3929 | 0.04926 | 168 | 116 | 38 | 14 |
652 | You know Daddy loves you both the same. | 1.3929 | 0.04550 | 168 | 111 | 48 | 9 |
653 | Oh, come on - a dog park is still a park. | 1.3929 | 0.04926 | 168 | 116 | 38 | 14 |
654 | And you can be our favorite human child. | 1.3929 | 0.05138 | 168 | 119 | 32 | 17 |
655 | Maybe next year, son, you should ask Santa for something that doesn't have the ability to listen and behave better than you. | 1.3929 | 0.05138 | 168 | 119 | 32 | 17 |
656 | Hey... don’t pout...you can be my OTHER best friend. | 1.3929 | 0.04926 | 168 | 116 | 38 | 14 |
657 | There’s something you should know about your new stepmom Billy | 1.3929 | 0.04779 | 168 | 114 | 42 | 12 |
658 | Nobody’s going to believe he’s an exchange student | 1.3920 | 0.04338 | 176 | 115 | 53 | 8 |
659 | Buster won Best In Show he gets to ride up front on the way home. | 1.3911 | 0.04774 | 179 | 124 | 40 | 15 |
660 | Santa misunderstood your wish for a dog with a trim coat. | 1.3911 | 0.04840 | 179 | 125 | 38 | 16 |
661 | Well, if YOU had gotten best in class, you might have gotten special treatment, too. | 1.3911 | 0.04774 | 179 | 124 | 40 | 15 |
662 | It's okay -he`s not mad at you for eating his homework. | 1.3911 | 0.04968 | 179 | 127 | 34 | 18 |
663 | Daddy loves you both equally but think of Toby as my domesticated son and today you are really acting an awful lot like his feral brother. | 1.3911 | 0.04774 | 179 | 124 | 40 | 15 |
664 | They don’t fit you anymore, Waffles needs these for his bark mitzvah | 1.3911 | 0.04433 | 179 | 119 | 50 | 10 |
665 | At least your brother knows not to talk back. | 1.3911 | 0.04641 | 179 | 122 | 44 | 13 |
666 | Look! Santa DID bring you a little brother! | 1.3911 | 0.04641 | 179 | 122 | 44 | 13 |
667 | Muffy wasn't upset when I told her SHE was adopted | 1.3908 | 0.04662 | 174 | 118 | 44 | 12 |
668 | Don't worry, you can be teacher's pet next week. | 1.3908 | 0.04733 | 174 | 119 | 42 | 13 |
669 | I want you both to sniff and make up. | 1.3908 | 0.04443 | 174 | 115 | 50 | 9 |
670 | Now Billy, we don’t make fun of Malcolm because he’s adopted. | 1.3908 | 0.04662 | 174 | 118 | 44 | 12 |
671 | It’ll be fun. I’ll hold onto his paw, and you’ll hold onto your Pa. | 1.3908 | 0.04662 | 174 | 118 | 44 | 12 |
672 | I know, but his obedience school has a strict dress code. | 1.3908 | 0.04517 | 174 | 116 | 48 | 10 |
673 | Of course I love you equally...just differently. | 1.3908 | 0.04939 | 174 | 122 | 36 | 16 |
674 | C'mon. You don't see Rex scowling about obedience school. | 1.3908 | 0.04517 | 174 | 116 | 48 | 10 |
675 | Well, he does need to look good during my zoom meetings. | 1.3908 | 0.04733 | 174 | 119 | 42 | 13 |
676 | I know he doesn’t fetch, but wait ‘til you see his table manners! | 1.3908 | 0.04733 | 174 | 119 | 42 | 13 |
677 | Don't be mad, the dog park has a new dress code. | 1.3908 | 0.04590 | 174 | 117 | 46 | 11 |
678 | Mommy and I told you. Fraternal twins - not identical. | 1.3908 | 0.04662 | 174 | 118 | 44 | 12 |
679 | Well yes, he is our favorite but we love you too. | 1.3906 | 0.04662 | 192 | 134 | 41 | 17 |
680 | He did your homework, didn't he? | 1.3904 | 0.04992 | 146 | 98 | 39 | 9 |
681 | Winston can hear the difference between Smetana and Dvorak. | 1.3898 | 0.05650 | 118 | 80 | 30 | 8 |
682 | Why can't you be more like your dog? | 1.3895 | 0.04625 | 172 | 116 | 45 | 11 |
683 | The government will probably pay for your tuition at private school if you get the vaccine too. It’s just one shot, son, and look, your brother’s fine. | 1.3895 | 0.04840 | 172 | 119 | 39 | 14 |
684 | Don’t worry, he’s only my therapy child. | 1.3886 | 0.04569 | 175 | 118 | 46 | 11 |
685 | Of course you’re adopted! | 1.3886 | 0.04848 | 175 | 122 | 38 | 15 |
686 | Now that you're not walking on all fours, you can get a suit too! | 1.3886 | 0.04641 | 175 | 119 | 44 | 12 |
687 | I keep telling you, Tommy, this is his birthday suit! | 1.3882 | 0.04430 | 170 | 112 | 50 | 8 |
688 | Of course we still love you | 1.3882 | 0.04807 | 170 | 117 | 40 | 13 |
689 | I know he is a dog dressed up as a boy, but you wouldn't wear the outfit that Grandma sent! | 1.3882 | 0.04734 | 170 | 116 | 42 | 12 |
690 | You’re right Jimmy, she is a bitch. | 1.3882 | 0.04807 | 170 | 117 | 40 | 13 |
691 | You wanted a brother, we wanted a dog, this is a win-win. | 1.3882 | 0.04734 | 170 | 116 | 42 | 12 |
692 | I understand you only had him for 2 years but he's 24 now and is off to college. | 1.3882 | 0.04734 | 170 | 116 | 42 | 12 |
693 | You need to get into a good obedience school. | 1.3882 | 0.04949 | 170 | 119 | 36 | 15 |
694 | Sorry,this year it's take your *favorite kid to work day. | 1.3882 | 0.04878 | 170 | 118 | 38 | 14 |
695 | Here’s Mommy’s answer to the baby brother request. | 1.3882 | 0.04734 | 170 | 116 | 42 | 12 |
696 | You said you wanted a new dog and a little brother. | 1.3882 | 0.04660 | 170 | 115 | 44 | 11 |
697 | Don't be angy, you're Daddy's "Good Boy" too. | 1.3882 | 0.04660 | 170 | 115 | 44 | 11 |
698 | don't worry Timmy, I won't cut off your balls too. | 1.3882 | 0.05088 | 170 | 121 | 32 | 17 |
699 | Sorry son, we can only afford private school for one of you. | 1.3882 | 0.05156 | 170 | 122 | 30 | 18 |
700 | Bring up those grades so you can get into Eton like your brother. | 1.3878 | 0.05239 | 147 | 102 | 33 | 12 |
701 | Except for his food and water bowls, you'll have to learn to share. | 1.3876 | 0.04654 | 178 | 122 | 43 | 13 |
702 | You can’t have a puppy, Noah. That would be weird. | 1.3875 | 0.05392 | 160 | 116 | 26 | 18 |
703 | Sorry Donald but he won... This is the Nobel Prize Wiener | 1.3869 | 0.05131 | 168 | 120 | 31 | 17 |
704 | Donald! Why can't you be a good boy like Romney here. Romney's a good boy! | 1.3869 | 0.05131 | 168 | 120 | 31 | 17 |
705 | I've told you, Timmy. Your stepbrother gets seven birthdays because of dog years. | 1.3869 | 0.04845 | 168 | 116 | 39 | 13 |
706 | It's not that he wear's it well. It's that he wears it at all. | 1.3869 | 0.04771 | 168 | 115 | 41 | 12 |
707 | Due to social distancing your mother and I weren’t able to give you a little brother this year. | 1.3869 | 0.04918 | 168 | 117 | 37 | 14 |
708 | Tommy, there's a good reason why we wear our pants this way and Scooter wears his backwards. | 1.3869 | 0.04845 | 168 | 116 | 39 | 13 |
709 | Once you learn how to fetch things, I will play with you too! | 1.3869 | 0.04918 | 168 | 117 | 37 | 14 |
710 | He had a reaction to the vaccine but he Is still your brother | 1.3869 | 0.04771 | 168 | 115 | 41 | 12 |
711 | Donny, just pretend he's your brother from another mother! | 1.3869 | 0.04918 | 168 | 117 | 37 | 14 |
712 | See how nice someone can be when they’ve gone to obedience school. | 1.3869 | 0.04619 | 168 | 113 | 45 | 10 |
713 | I know it's a word for a female dog. I still don't want you calling your sister that. | 1.3869 | 0.04918 | 168 | 117 | 37 | 14 |
714 | That's silly! Who told you you're adopted?! | 1.3869 | 0.04845 | 168 | 116 | 39 | 13 |
715 | Fido can fetch. You were Born to Kvetch. | 1.3869 | 0.04845 | 168 | 116 | 39 | 13 |
716 | Sorry son, but based on all the attention I'm getting from the cute school moms, I'm sticking with the dog in the suit instead. | 1.3869 | 0.04619 | 168 | 113 | 45 | 10 |
717 | Just because he put on his own clothes doesn't mean you can poop in the yard. | 1.3869 | 0.04771 | 168 | 115 | 41 | 12 |
718 | I promise, you’ll get a treat too. | 1.3869 | 0.04695 | 168 | 114 | 43 | 11 |
719 | Get it together, Jeremy. Your brother somehow manages to tuck his shirt in and hold my hand, and he doesn't even have thumbs. | 1.3862 | 0.05287 | 145 | 101 | 32 | 12 |
720 | You know the rules: you have to behave seven time longer than the dog. | 1.3861 | 0.04977 | 158 | 109 | 37 | 12 |
721 | You can have your suit back as soon as Daddy makes the TikTok video. | 1.3860 | 0.04711 | 171 | 117 | 42 | 12 |
722 | We’ve promoted Rex and you’ll be reporting into him now. | 1.3860 | 0.04487 | 171 | 114 | 48 | 9 |
723 | Who’s a good boy!? Now walk Max to his first day at Harvard. | 1.3857 | 0.05325 | 140 | 97 | 32 | 11 |
724 | THIS is how you dress for success! | 1.3846 | 0.04441 | 169 | 112 | 49 | 8 |
725 | Just think in about a decade, you’ll be the only child again. | 1.3846 | 0.05244 | 143 | 99 | 33 | 11 |
726 | Play nice or you'll be neutered too. | 1.3846 | 0.05429 | 143 | 101 | 29 | 13 |
727 | I know you wanted a brother, but he listens when I tell him to do things and no college debt! | 1.3846 | 0.04361 | 169 | 111 | 51 | 7 |
728 | It's not nice to make fun of what a person is wearing.....or the fact that they're not a person. | 1.3841 | 0.04960 | 151 | 103 | 38 | 10 |
729 | Who’s also a good boy? | 1.3832 | 0.04785 | 167 | 115 | 40 | 12 |
730 | You can have his room once he leaves to crew for Oxford." | 1.3832 | 0.04785 | 167 | 115 | 40 | 12 |
731 | Now you know why we had the divorce. | 1.3831 | 0.05228 | 154 | 109 | 31 | 14 |
732 | I know it’s your suit son, but he gets more likes when he wears it. | 1.3831 | 0.04978 | 154 | 106 | 37 | 11 |
733 | He gets nicer clothes because you still pee on the rug. | 1.3830 | 0.05099 | 141 | 96 | 36 | 9 |
734 | Sure, but you have opposable thumbs. | 1.3826 | 0.05181 | 149 | 104 | 33 | 12 |
735 | He gets nicer clothes than you because he doesn’t outgrow them, not because we love him more. I mean, we do, but that’s not why he gets nicer clothes. | 1.3818 | 0.04823 | 165 | 114 | 39 | 12 |
736 | This will prepare you for the dog-eat-dog world. | 1.3818 | 0.04746 | 165 | 113 | 41 | 11 |
737 | There could only be one best boy. | 1.3818 | 0.04423 | 165 | 109 | 49 | 7 |
738 | Sorry, but they only let me bring one kid to "Bring Your Child to Work" Day. | 1.3818 | 0.05120 | 165 | 118 | 31 | 16 |
739 | Son, Baxter is confused because of the pandemic. He’ll go back to being a dog once you go back to school. | 1.3818 | 0.05048 | 165 | 117 | 33 | 15 |
740 | I don’t get it. Every time I ring the bell, your brother does his school work. How is this so hard for you? | 1.3815 | 0.04595 | 173 | 118 | 44 | 11 |
741 | Of course, we can still play ball together, son. | 1.3813 | 0.05441 | 139 | 98 | 29 | 12 |
742 | He’s only older than you in dog years. | 1.3813 | 0.05146 | 139 | 95 | 35 | 9 |
743 | Well, if you hadn't rejected Gran-Gran's Buster Brown Christmas outfit maybe you would have been the one to go viral on Tik-Tok. | 1.3810 | 0.05317 | 147 | 104 | 30 | 13 |
744 | You think this is amazing? Wait until you hear him bark in French. | 1.3810 | 0.04762 | 168 | 116 | 40 | 12 |
745 | Son I’m sorry we left you at the kennel, and dropped Charlie off at boarding school, but it’s for your own good | 1.3810 | 0.05123 | 168 | 121 | 30 | 17 |
746 | Trust me, you don’t want the procedure Fido just had. | 1.3810 | 0.04610 | 168 | 114 | 44 | 10 |
747 | He identifies as a human now | 1.3810 | 0.04909 | 168 | 118 | 36 | 14 |
748 | No, you can’t have a hot dog. | 1.3806 | 0.05436 | 155 | 113 | 25 | 17 |
749 | But you don’t go to private school. | 1.3804 | 0.05015 | 163 | 115 | 34 | 14 |
750 | Be a good boy and fetch the newspaper. | 1.3804 | 0.05090 | 163 | 116 | 32 | 15 |
751 | Today is his day. Tomorrow we'll go to the human park. | 1.3804 | 0.04622 | 163 | 110 | 44 | 9 |
752 | Happens every year, Billy. He'll keep his resolution until the first hydrant you pass, then it's back on a leash by tomorrow! | 1.3804 | 0.04622 | 163 | 110 | 44 | 9 |
753 | Well now Michael, ‘usurper’ is quite a big word for a five-year-old! | 1.3804 | 0.04939 | 163 | 114 | 36 | 13 |
754 | Even though Mr. Woofles is insta-famous and pays for our house, you’re special, too. | 1.3804 | 0.05015 | 163 | 115 | 34 | 14 |
755 | We still love you, Timmy. He just dresses so well and was so much easier to housebreak. | 1.3804 | 0.04540 | 163 | 109 | 46 | 8 |
756 | I know it's a little odd, but this is the closest thing to a little brother you're gonna get! | 1.3804 | 0.04939 | 163 | 114 | 36 | 13 |
757 | Just because he is adopted doesn’t mean he isn’t your brother. | 1.3804 | 0.04622 | 163 | 110 | 44 | 9 |
758 | Sorry son, but you’ll get your own suit once your TikTok video hits 1M | 1.3804 | 0.04939 | 163 | 114 | 35 | 13 |
759 | I also thought he meant something different when he said he wanted to be fetching | 1.3804 | 0.05164 | 163 | 117 | 30 | 16 |
760 | Nevertheless, you’re to stop calling him an SOB. | 1.3796 | 0.05037 | 137 | 95 | 33 | 9 |
761 | You've got to admit, he can pull that look off. | 1.3796 | 0.05592 | 137 | 98 | 26 | 13 |
762 | Now, now, Bobby, Roscoe's nose is just naturally brown! | 1.3795 | 0.04799 | 166 | 115 | 39 | 12 |
763 | I love you son, but he's my best friend. | 1.3791 | 0.04819 | 153 | 104 | 40 | 9 |
764 | Today, he graduates from Obedience School.” | 1.3791 | 0.05037 | 153 | 109 | 31 | 13 |
765 | But kindergarten is more fun than obedience school. | 1.3791 | 0.04729 | 153 | 103 | 42 | 8 |
766 | You’re a big boy now, so he’s Daddy’s new chick magnet. | 1.3791 | 0.04908 | 153 | 105 | 38 | 10 |
767 | She’s not too old to hold hands and she’s almost 77. | 1.3789 | 0.04740 | 161 | 110 | 41 | 10 |
768 | I know he peed in your shoes. He’s just different. Come on now, tell your little brother you love him. | 1.3789 | 0.04902 | 161 | 112 | 37 | 12 |
769 | I said, NO biting! | 1.3789 | 0.04902 | 161 | 112 | 37 | 12 |
770 | ‘We are taking a walk so he can poop not you.’ | 1.3788 | 0.05539 | 132 | 93 | 28 | 11 |
771 | Don't be upset. You're a good boy too. | 1.3780 | 0.04680 | 164 | 112 | 42 | 10 |
772 | It was either this or no brother at all. | 1.3780 | 0.04600 | 164 | 111 | 44 | 9 |
773 | I know you miss mommy, but you need to accept the dog and I are together now. | 1.3780 | 0.04600 | 164 | 111 | 44 | 9 |
774 | Your mother and I think it is the right time to tell you that you are adopted. | 1.3780 | 0.04680 | 164 | 112 | 42 | 10 |
775 | I know he looks ridiculous, but we can have the trousers adjusted. | 1.3780 | 0.05064 | 164 | 117 | 32 | 15 |
776 | Time to get dressed — we’re going to see ‘Hamilton!’ | 1.3780 | 0.04760 | 164 | 113 | 40 | 11 |
777 | I dress you differently so I can tell you apart! | 1.3780 | 0.04760 | 164 | 113 | 40 | 11 |
778 | Well, he learned to speak before you, that's why he gets to go to private school. | 1.3780 | 0.04838 | 164 | 114 | 38 | 12 |
779 | Don't worry Bobby. When you're ready we'll send you to obedience school too. | 1.3780 | 0.04760 | 164 | 113 | 40 | 11 |
780 | That’s silly, why would you think you were adopted? | 1.3780 | 0.04760 | 164 | 113 | 40 | 11 |
781 | He’s potty trained and dressed himself. You should take notes son. | 1.3780 | 0.04760 | 164 | 113 | 40 | 11 |
782 | Now that he has a PhD, he'd rather not chase the balls any more. | 1.3780 | 0.04838 | 164 | 114 | 38 | 12 |
783 | That's the beauty of it, Tommy. Coco is a puppy AND a successful social media influencer. | 1.3780 | 0.04914 | 164 | 115 | 36 | 13 |
784 | I'm sorry Billy but I'm not picking up your poop too | 1.3780 | 0.05064 | 164 | 117 | 32 | 15 |
785 | Yes, he is a dog, but he did up the buttons all by himself! | 1.3780 | 0.04760 | 164 | 113 | 40 | 11 |
786 | Listen, son, the pandemic has been tough for all of us - just pretend this is your pal Howie | 1.3780 | 0.04680 | 164 | 112 | 42 | 10 |
787 | Just because Spot is a Good Boy doesn’t make you any less special. | 1.3780 | 0.04838 | 164 | 114 | 38 | 12 |
788 | Private school costs less than his doggy day care, so for now, he's going to school with you. | 1.3780 | 0.04990 | 164 | 116 | 34 | 14 |
789 | We were surprised too that Barker took to home-schooling so well. | 1.3780 | 0.04760 | 164 | 113 | 40 | 11 |
790 | I don’t think I’m the father, either, but we have to be nice. | 1.3780 | 0.04990 | 164 | 116 | 34 | 14 |
791 | Just go along with it, son, he's refusing to make any more viral videos if we don't pretend he's Prince George. | 1.3775 | 0.05125 | 151 | 106 | 33 | 12 |
792 | It has all the advantages of a little brother, without the college tuition costs | 1.3774 | 0.05178 | 159 | 114 | 30 | 15 |
793 | Only obedient boys get to go to the park. | 1.3774 | 0.04861 | 159 | 110 | 38 | 11 |
794 | When YOU are a good boy, I'll call YOU a good boy. | 1.3774 | 0.04861 | 159 | 110 | 38 | 11 |
795 | Next year,maybe we will be able to send you both to private school. | 1.3774 | 0.04942 | 159 | 111 | 36 | 12 |
796 | This is the closest they had to a little brother at the pet store. | 1.3774 | 0.04861 | 159 | 110 | 38 | 11 |
797 | Come on now, I want TWO good boys. | 1.3774 | 0.04861 | 159 | 110 | 38 | 11 |
798 | Now why can't you be a good boy? | 1.3774 | 0.04609 | 159 | 107 | 44 | 8 |
799 | We only had one private-school voucher and, frankly, he had more potential. | 1.3774 | 0.04942 | 159 | 111 | 36 | 12 |
800 | oh that’s silly . . . now heel | 1.3774 | 0.04902 | 159 | 113 | 33 | 13 |
801 | He was here first and to be fair: he is cheaper to maintain. | 1.3774 | 0.04609 | 159 | 107 | 44 | 8 |
802 | That's right, son, I'm dating someone new. | 1.3774 | 0.04861 | 159 | 110 | 38 | 11 |
803 | Cheer up son, not everyone can be the pick of the litter. | 1.3774 | 0.04694 | 159 | 108 | 42 | 9 |
804 | I know you’re upset, but we were pet parents long before we were your parents | 1.3774 | 0.04694 | 159 | 108 | 42 | 9 |
805 | Some days you’re the dog; some days you’re the hydrant. | 1.3774 | 0.05022 | 159 | 112 | 34 | 13 |
806 | Just because your brother lifts his leg at the park doesn’t mean you get to too | 1.3774 | 0.04778 | 159 | 109 | 40 | 10 |
807 | It’s okay, you can be man’s second best friend. | 1.3774 | 0.04342 | 159 | 104 | 50 | 5 |
808 | The TikTok algorithm likes dog content more | 1.3774 | 0.04861 | 159 | 110 | 38 | 11 |
809 | Sweatheart, you’ll get the same treatment if you learn to love me unconditionally too. | 1.3774 | 0.04942 | 159 | 111 | 36 | 12 |
810 | honestly it was a fair swap Tommy and the pet shop will take great care of you | 1.3774 | 0.05101 | 159 | 113 | 32 | 14 |
811 | Because every time we buy you nice clothes, you ruin them. | 1.3772 | 0.04544 | 167 | 113 | 45 | 9 |
812 | It's simple, sit when I tell you too. | 1.3772 | 0.04700 | 167 | 115 | 41 | 11 |
813 | What makes you feel like you were adopted? | 1.3772 | 0.04776 | 167 | 116 | 39 | 12 |
814 | Come on, Timmy, you don't see Prince complaining about obedience, routine, and daily exercise. | 1.3768 | 0.05265 | 138 | 96 | 32 | 10 |
815 | OK then- it's settled. You say "potat-oh" and he says "woof." | 1.3768 | 0.05462 | 138 | 98 | 28 | 12 |
816 | True, you’re my son, but he’s my best friend! | 1.3766 | 0.04705 | 154 | 104 | 42 | 8 |
817 | Now come on, son. Tell Rex you’re sorry you ate his homework. | 1.3766 | 0.05136 | 154 | 109 | 32 | 13 |
818 | You're the lucky one....You don't have to go to some swanky obedience school. | 1.3766 | 0.05136 | 154 | 109 | 32 | 13 |
819 | Your brother isn’t teasing you, you’re not supposed to have a tail. | 1.3766 | 0.04882 | 154 | 106 | 38 | 10 |
820 | Be nice,I bought him this suit because he just got his balls chopped off. | 1.3765 | 0.05182 | 162 | 117 | 29 | 16 |
821 | Aw c'mon. Be happy for him! It's his first day at puppy school. | 1.3765 | 0.04380 | 162 | 107 | 49 | 6 |
822 | You're the one who said he was part of the family. | 1.3758 | 0.04644 | 157 | 106 | 43 | 8 |
823 | Hey, Buddy, cheer up.. he found us through Ancestry .com! | 1.3758 | 0.04901 | 157 | 109 | 37 | 11 |
824 | Do you see anyone else here being predatory, territorial or aggressive? | 1.3758 | 0.04556 | 157 | 105 | 45 | 7 |
825 | OK, he has a tail. but you have shoes. Let's call it even. | 1.3758 | 0.05145 | 157 | 112 | 31 | 14 |
826 | I know you really wanted that bike, Tommy, but Grover peed on it first. | 1.3758 | 0.04901 | 157 | 109 | 37 | 11 |
827 | He's always been a good boy. | 1.3758 | 0.05301 | 157 | 114 | 27 | 16 |
828 | Stop acting like the President. | 1.3758 | 0.04984 | 157 | 110 | 35 | 12 |
829 | Yes son, he does have your old pants on backwards | 1.3758 | 0.05145 | 157 | 112 | 31 | 14 |
830 | We're all getting used to home schooling. | 1.3758 | 0.04901 | 157 | 109 | 37 | 11 |
831 | You bit him first! | 1.3758 | 0.04901 | 157 | 109 | 37 | 11 |
832 | Don't worry, it's not competition. Right now he's Species Confused. | 1.3758 | 0.05065 | 157 | 111 | 33 | 13 |
833 | Since you outgrew it, I thought he could wear it to his obedience school graduation. | 1.3758 | 0.05065 | 157 | 109 | 32 | 13 |
834 | She may seem like a bitch, but you and your sister have to learn how to get along. | 1.3758 | 0.05224 | 157 | 113 | 29 | 15 |
835 | I told him if he promises to feed you, he can keep you. | 1.3758 | 0.04984 | 157 | 110 | 35 | 12 |
836 | Son, you outgrew it! | 1.3758 | 0.04731 | 157 | 107 | 41 | 9 |
837 | Come on little dude, let Charlie play on your baseball team. You know he can run faster than you. | 1.3758 | 0.05224 | 157 | 113 | 29 | 15 |
838 | Now you know he didn't intend to pee on your shoes. He was just excited to see you. | 1.3758 | 0.05301 | 157 | 114 | 27 | 16 |
839 | Be a good boy and fetch me a beer. | 1.3758 | 0.04901 | 157 | 109 | 37 | 11 |
840 | C'mon, you're gonna love obedience school! | 1.3758 | 0.04817 | 157 | 108 | 39 | 10 |
841 | Just go tell Mrs. Smith your sister ate your homework | 1.3758 | 0.05065 | 157 | 111 | 33 | 13 |
842 | Now, I want you to apologize to Rex for calling him a brown nose. | 1.3758 | 0.05145 | 157 | 112 | 31 | 14 |
843 | Cory, there’s no reason to be jealous! You’ll always be my only biological son. | 1.3758 | 0.04817 | 157 | 113 | 31 | 13 |
844 | He identifies himself as your brother, his pronouns are he/him | 1.3758 | 0.04984 | 157 | 110 | 35 | 12 |
845 | I guess homeschooling hasn’t been as effective for everyone this year. | 1.3758 | 0.05065 | 157 | 111 | 33 | 13 |
846 | It’s not that I love him more, I just loved him first. | 1.3758 | 0.04496 | 165 | 111 | 46 | 8 |
847 | Remember he is a lot older than you in dog years. | 1.3750 | 0.04917 | 160 | 112 | 36 | 12 |
848 | No, you are not a rescue boy. | 1.3750 | 0.05212 | 136 | 94 | 33 | 9 |
849 | He’s not like us, son. He must have inhereted only your mother’s genes | 1.3750 | 0.04586 | 160 | 108 | 44 | 8 |
850 | Don’t worry on the internet no one knows he’s a dog. | 1.3742 | 0.05109 | 155 | 110 | 32 | 13 |
851 | You will always be the pick of the litter to me. | 1.3742 | 0.04856 | 155 | 107 | 38 | 10 |
852 | I wish you could go to obedience school too. | 1.3742 | 0.04681 | 155 | 109 | 34 | 11 |
853 | And when you can dress yourself, you'll be a good boy, too. | 1.3742 | 0.04856 | 155 | 107 | 38 | 10 |
854 | All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others. That's why he gets the suit. | 1.3742 | 0.05026 | 155 | 109 | 34 | 12 |
855 | Boarding school isn't that bad, just look at Toby. | 1.3742 | 0.05026 | 155 | 109 | 34 | 12 |
856 | If anyone asks, this is your little brother, Danny... we’ll split the extra $600 60/40... Okay! 50/50! | 1.3742 | 0.04681 | 155 | 105 | 42 | 8 |
857 | Son, I'm not treating you like the dog. I've been treating him like a child since before you were born. | 1.3741 | 0.05234 | 139 | 97 | 32 | 10 |
858 | Why Yes! Rover is Daddy's pet. | 1.3741 | 0.05234 | 139 | 97 | 32 | 10 |
859 | Stop looking upset, apologize, and give back Charles his shoes. | 1.3741 | 0.05031 | 139 | 95 | 36 | 8 |
860 | But you didn’t like the suit anyway! | 1.3741 | 0.04926 | 139 | 94 | 38 | 7 |
861 | Tell ya what, Bub, we'll get you a nice new outfit with the next stimulus check, ok? | 1.3734 | 0.04707 | 158 | 108 | 41 | 9 |
862 | Of course he is your brother from another mother. | 1.3734 | 0.05118 | 158 | 113 | 31 | 14 |
863 | Don’t get upset, you can try on the cat’s pajamas | 1.3734 | 0.05038 | 158 | 112 | 33 | 13 |
864 | It's man's best friend, not boy's... | 1.3731 | 0.05262 | 134 | 93 | 32 | 9 |
865 | And that, Donald, is how you declare extra dependents on your taxes | 1.3727 | 0.05124 | 161 | 116 | 30 | 15 |
866 | Don't be jealous, who's my original good boy? | 1.3727 | 0.04892 | 161 | 113 | 36 | 12 |
867 | Don't worry. He's a good boy! | 1.3725 | 0.04984 | 153 | 107 | 35 | 11 |
868 | He had to sleep outside when he was your age too. | 1.3725 | 0.05069 | 153 | 108 | 33 | 12 |
869 | You should be happy he’s your older brother. It means we didn’t give up. | 1.3721 | 0.05286 | 129 | 89 | 32 | 8 |
870 | Yes, you’re a good boy too. | 1.3720 | 0.04590 | 164 | 112 | 43 | 9 |
871 | He’s only my best friend. You’re my best BOY. | 1.3720 | 0.04590 | 164 | 112 | 43 | 9 |
872 | Now nobody will think you're twins anymore | 1.3718 | 0.05162 | 156 | 112 | 30 | 14 |
873 | I'm sorry, but this is how vaccine trials go. You got the placebo, that's all. | 1.3718 | 0.04999 | 156 | 110 | 34 | 12 |
874 | So you'll have to share toys, but shoes? All yours. | 1.3718 | 0.04831 | 156 | 108 | 38 | 10 |
875 | Cut it out! ...you wouldn't wear that anyway! | 1.3718 | 0.04567 | 156 | 105 | 44 | 7 |
876 | Ok Billy, your sister just got her vaccine, time to get yours | 1.3718 | 0.04916 | 156 | 109 | 36 | 11 |
877 | Timmy, we rescued Fluffy from Brooks Brothers so he wouldn't ever have to dress like this again... | 1.3704 | 0.05335 | 135 | 95 | 30 | 10 |
878 | Settle down or you go to the kennel. | 1.3704 | 0.05335 | 135 | 95 | 30 | 10 |
879 | Obedience training will be good for you, son. Just look what it did for Sparky. | 1.3701 | 0.05126 | 154 | 110 | 31 | 13 |
880 | Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy? Is it you? Is it you? No, it's Cooper! | 1.3701 | 0.05208 | 154 | 111 | 29 | 14 |
881 | You are the one that wanted a puppy. Now walk Buster to his business meeting. | 1.3701 | 0.05126 | 154 | 110 | 31 | 13 |
882 | Of course he's not my favourite, Darren. Now run along or Fido will be late for his piano lesson. | 1.3701 | 0.04871 | 154 | 107 | 37 | 10 |
883 | You'll love Obedience School! | 1.3699 | 0.04427 | 173 | 118 | 46 | 9 |
884 | And that’s why you should dress for the job you want, not the job you have. | 1.3699 | 0.04577 | 173 | 120 | 42 | 11 |
885 | In Zoom-school, nobody knows he’s a dog | 1.3694 | 0.05055 | 157 | 112 | 32 | 13 |
886 | You're a great kid but he's got papers. | 1.3694 | 0.04633 | 157 | 107 | 42 | 8 |
887 | But he's the one who gives me unqualified love. | 1.3694 | 0.04890 | 157 | 110 | 36 | 11 |
888 | Yes, you still have to use the toilet! | 1.3694 | 0.04720 | 157 | 108 | 40 | 9 |
889 | Your only my son, but he’s man’s best friend | 1.3694 | 0.04633 | 157 | 107 | 42 | 8 |
890 | I hope this is a lesson to you to only ask Santa for a brother OR a puppy. | 1.3694 | 0.04973 | 157 | 111 | 34 | 12 |
891 | Ok, next time we'll use the indoor toilet. | 1.3694 | 0.04890 | 157 | 110 | 36 | 11 |
892 | Who wants a T R E A T? | 1.3687 | 0.05064 | 160 | 115 | 31 | 14 |
893 | Shoes? You're a riot. He doesn't need shoes, he's a dog! | 1.3687 | 0.04826 | 160 | 112 | 37 | 11 |
894 | You're mom's favorite. Isn't that enough? | 1.3687 | 0.04907 | 160 | 113 | 35 | 12 |
895 | Now.. Donald... knock it off! She's not your bitch. She's your friend. | 1.3687 | 0.05141 | 160 | 116 | 29 | 15 |
896 | Sorry, but he's man's best friend. | 1.3684 | 0.05086 | 152 | 108 | 32 | 12 |
897 | Cheer up, Billy. You have the whole summer together before he has to go back to boarding school. | 1.3684 | 0.05171 | 133 | 92 | 33 | 8 |
898 | Now, I need you both to stop peeing in trees. | 1.3684 | 0.05594 | 133 | 96 | 25 | 12 |
899 | Com'n boy, show him how you shake hands. | 1.3684 | 0.05280 | 133 | 93 | 31 | 9 |
900 | Maybe we both need a few more Pointers. | 1.3684 | 0.05280 | 133 | 93 | 31 | 9 |
901 | ... because your mother says paternity tests are too expensive. | 1.3684 | 0.05171 | 152 | 109 | 30 | 13 |
902 | Listen son, if your mother asks, your brother has always looked like this. | 1.3677 | 0.05180 | 155 | 112 | 29 | 14 |
903 | Meet your new teacher for asynchronous remote math! | 1.3676 | 0.05602 | 136 | 99 | 24 | 13 |
904 | Don't worry son, you wont have to walk him. He does everything himself-including our taxes. | 1.3676 | 0.05404 | 136 | 97 | 28 | 11 |
905 | He wants you to be his pet. | 1.3676 | 0.05302 | 136 | 96 | 30 | 10 |
906 | JOSH, IF YOU DON'T BEHAVE, FIDO WILL GO TO HARVARD, AND YOU WILL BE SENT TO A STATE SCHOOL! | 1.3676 | 0.05199 | 136 | 95 | 32 | 9 |
907 | You’re right, I should tell it to you more often, but yes, you’re a very good boy too! | 1.3675 | 0.05509 | 117 | 81 | 29 | 7 |
908 | Magic, huh? Now please change her back... | 1.3672 | 0.05750 | 128 | 93 | 23 | 12 |
909 | You know the rule. When you're housebroken, you get to pick your outfit. | 1.3671 | 0.04696 | 158 | 109 | 40 | 9 |
910 | I'm telling you, the clothes don't make the dog. | 1.3671 | 0.04947 | 158 | 112 | 34 | 12 |
911 | This one is a purebred caucasian. You know how they can be when they don't get their way. | 1.3667 | 0.05131 | 150 | 107 | 31 | 12 |
912 | C’mon buddy, I was hoping we wouldn’t need the leash today! | 1.3667 | 0.04769 | 150 | 103 | 39 | 8 |
913 | Still want a puppy? | 1.3664 | 0.05107 | 131 | 90 | 34 | 7 |
914 | You need to be gentle. This one is not a boxer. | 1.3660 | 0.04885 | 153 | 107 | 36 | 10 |
915 | You'd better behave or we're replacing you with a cat. | 1.3660 | 0.05058 | 153 | 109 | 32 | 12 |
916 | He'll eat the veggies off your plate that you don't like. | 1.3660 | 0.04885 | 153 | 107 | 36 | 10 |
917 | When your IG account gets sponsored we’ll buy you nicer clothes, too. | 1.3660 | 0.04885 | 153 | 107 | 36 | 10 |
918 | Why can't you be as well behaved as Piper? | 1.3660 | 0.05058 | 153 | 109 | 32 | 12 |
919 | It’s okay, buddy, you’re Mom’s best friend. | 1.3660 | 0.04885 | 153 | 107 | 36 | 10 |
920 | -"stop crying or we'll swap your dinners too" | 1.3660 | 0.05143 | 153 | 110 | 30 | 13 |
921 | Reginald wondered how long he could keep up the charade before the small one discovered his secret... his only hope was the low intelligence of the big one. | 1.3660 | 0.05143 | 153 | 110 | 30 | 13 |
922 | Well...I'm sorry, but, he was planned... | 1.3660 | 0.05143 | 153 | 110 | 30 | 13 |
923 | Now you know why you didn’t get a dogie treat. You need to dress up. | 1.3650 | 0.05567 | 137 | 100 | 24 | 13 |
924 | Just jolly him along til we get to the p-o-u-n-d. | 1.3649 | 0.05087 | 148 | 105 | 32 | 11 |
925 | Guess who’s adopted? | 1.3649 | 0.04712 | 148 | 101 | 40 | 7 |
926 | You need to apologize right now for calling your little brother "dog-face". | 1.3649 | 0.04903 | 148 | 103 | 36 | 9 |
927 | If your Mom can forgive me so can you. | 1.3649 | 0.04903 | 148 | 103 | 36 | 9 |
928 | No, really, Douglas. I told Mom I like our DOUG better. | 1.3649 | 0.05087 | 148 | 105 | 32 | 11 |
929 | I don't like it when you call Mommy that! | 1.3649 | 0.05265 | 148 | 107 | 28 | 13 |
930 | We'll get you the same outfit when you get potty-trained. | 1.3649 | 0.04903 | 148 | 103 | 36 | 9 |
931 | « It might not seem fair, but you have to keep your front tail covered until we get home. » Lisa H. Portland, Oregon | 1.3649 | 0.04996 | 148 | 104 | 34 | 10 |
932 | Well Skippy says HE called shotgun first, so... | 1.3649 | 0.04808 | 148 | 102 | 38 | 8 |
933 | Who’s a good boy, now ! | 1.3649 | 0.04808 | 148 | 102 | 38 | 8 |
934 | To be fair, when he peed on it, he thought it was his. | 1.3649 | 0.05087 | 148 | 105 | 32 | 11 |
935 | But Timmy, he says YOU ate his homework | 1.3649 | 0.04996 | 148 | 104 | 34 | 10 |
936 | Yes, you are both adopted | 1.3649 | 0.05176 | 148 | 106 | 30 | 12 |
937 | You can do it. little buddy. Heeling is fun! | 1.3648 | 0.04586 | 159 | 109 | 42 | 8 |
938 | Sure, you know ONE of you is adopted; the question remains which one? | 1.3643 | 0.04988 | 140 | 97 | 35 | 8 |
939 | He is 35 years old. He can stay up as late as he wants | 1.3642 | 0.04836 | 151 | 105 | 37 | 9 |
940 | I'm sorry but we can only afford one member of the family in privated school and it aint you sonny. | 1.3631 | 0.05044 | 157 | 113 | 31 | 13 |
941 | If you keep biting him, he won't want to play with you. | 1.3631 | 0.05044 | 157 | 113 | 31 | 13 |
942 | Son, you can’t go around showing the other kids your “tail” | 1.3630 | 0.05039 | 146 | 103 | 33 | 10 |
943 | Instead of eating your homework, he'll help you with it. | 1.3630 | 0.05039 | 146 | 103 | 33 | 10 |
944 | Of course, he got a raise in his allowance. He's the head of his class in obedience school. | 1.3630 | 0.05223 | 146 | 105 | 29 | 12 |
945 | No more sulking or it's the cone for you! | 1.3630 | 0.05401 | 146 | 107 | 25 | 14 |
946 | This year we are all taking a turn in the dog house and this week is yours. | 1.3630 | 0.05132 | 146 | 104 | 31 | 11 |
947 | He does tricks -- you just eat them. | 1.3630 | 0.04773 | 135 | 91 | 39 | 5 |
948 | Now I’d like you to shake hands and make up and then maybe roll over. | 1.3630 | 0.04999 | 135 | 93 | 35 | 7 |
949 | It was your mother’s idea. | 1.3630 | 0.05321 | 135 | 96 | 29 | 10 |
950 | No, Billy, that's not true. You are not adopted. | 1.3623 | 0.05033 | 138 | 96 | 34 | 8 |
951 | Just remember to step away if he lifts his hind leg. | 1.3623 | 0.05339 | 138 | 99 | 28 | 11 |
952 | What's the problem Billy? Remember what I told you and your brother? You have to hold my hand, or I put on your leash. | 1.3621 | 0.05664 | 116 | 82 | 26 | 8 |
953 | You're still Daddy's SECOND best friend! | 1.3617 | 0.06567 | 94 | 68 | 18 | 8 |
954 | Don't worry son, you're only fraternal twins! | 1.3611 | 0.05179 | 144 | 103 | 30 | 11 |
955 | He got to wear the suit today cuz he finished all his dinner last night. | 1.3611 | 0.04987 | 144 | 101 | 33 | 9 |
956 | Of course I love you more. That's why we dress alike. | 1.3611 | 0.04889 | 144 | 100 | 36 | 8 |
957 | He thinks he’s Prince George, and we just gotta let him have this one, ok? | 1.3611 | 0.05179 | 144 | 103 | 30 | 11 |
958 | At least he's potty-trained. | 1.3611 | 0.05084 | 144 | 102 | 32 | 10 |
959 | Shake, Johnny, shake. Good boy! | 1.3611 | 0.04987 | 144 | 101 | 34 | 9 |
960 | Those rap songs are not about his mom! | 1.3611 | 0.04889 | 144 | 100 | 36 | 8 |
961 | If you were a member of the British royal family, you could wear short pants too. | 1.3611 | 0.05084 | 144 | 102 | 32 | 10 |
962 | Don't worry, he'll never replace you. He's just another suit in this dog eat dog world. | 1.3611 | 0.05179 | 144 | 103 | 30 | 11 |
963 | You're not losing a father. You're gaining a best friend. | 1.3611 | 0.04987 | 144 | 101 | 34 | 9 |
964 | See, obedience school could work wonders for you. | 1.3611 | 0.05179 | 144 | 103 | 30 | 11 |
965 | You are just fraternal twins | 1.3611 | 0.04889 | 144 | 100 | 36 | 8 |
966 | Come on Son, get the ball | 1.3611 | 0.05084 | 144 | 102 | 32 | 10 |
967 | You’ll like it at doggie day care, even if there is a dress code | 1.3611 | 0.04987 | 144 | 101 | 34 | 9 |
968 | Ms. Devos's feasibility study says Skippy will get much more from an education than you. | 1.3611 | 0.05084 | 144 | 102 | 32 | 10 |
969 | Of course he got more gifts, his birthday is worth 7 of yours. | 1.3611 | 0.05271 | 144 | 104 | 28 | 12 |
970 | I told you. I love you both equally, even though you're different. For instance, you can talk, and he's a better dresser than you. | 1.3611 | 0.04889 | 144 | 100 | 36 | 8 |
971 | Don't worry; you're my second-best friend! | 1.3611 | 0.04889 | 144 | 100 | 36 | 8 |
972 | It’s complicated. | 1.3611 | 0.04889 | 144 | 100 | 36 | 8 |
973 | We could only afford to send one of you to private school. | 1.3611 | 0.05363 | 144 | 105 | 26 | 13 |
974 | Mommy and I love you both equally. It’s just that we have higher hopes for him. | 1.3611 | 0.04889 | 144 | 100 | 36 | 8 |
975 | He peed in the toilet. | 1.3611 | 0.05179 | 144 | 103 | 30 | 11 |
976 | You said you wanted a brother | 1.3611 | 0.04789 | 144 | 99 | 38 | 7 |
977 | Why are you angry, you have been asking for a brother for months? | 1.3611 | 0.05084 | 144 | 102 | 32 | 10 |
978 | I'm sorry Timmy, but there can only be one good boy. | 1.3611 | 0.05271 | 144 | 104 | 28 | 12 |
979 | See, son? Max was also homeschooled and now he’s graduating. | 1.3611 | 0.05271 | 144 | 104 | 28 | 12 |
980 | The sibling rivalry of karma and dogma. | 1.3611 | 0.04789 | 144 | 99 | 38 | 7 |
981 | Why can't you be more like your puppy? | 1.3609 | 0.05045 | 133 | 92 | 34 | 7 |
982 | That's a good boy! | 1.3609 | 0.05266 | 133 | 94 | 30 | 9 |
983 | If he has to go to church, you have to go to church. | 1.3609 | 0.05373 | 133 | 95 | 28 | 10 |
984 | You're adopted. | 1.3609 | 0.05266 | 133 | 94 | 30 | 9 |
985 | Sure he always wins at fetch, but he's also lousy at walking on two hind legs. | 1.3609 | 0.05156 | 133 | 93 | 32 | 8 |
986 | Last week your sister was Miss Cranky Pants and look what happened to her! | 1.3609 | 0.05156 | 133 | 93 | 32 | 8 |
987 | It's OK - your bark is also getting better! | 1.3607 | 0.05342 | 122 | 85 | 30 | 7 |
988 | It doesn’t fit you anymore. | 1.3605 | 0.05011 | 147 | 104 | 33 | 10 |
989 | I know it's a lovely suit, but you're too big for it now anyway. Besides, it looks better on him. | 1.3605 | 0.04821 | 147 | 102 | 37 | 8 |
990 | I don't know why you couldn't have picked up a new trick during quarantine too. | 1.3600 | 0.05611 | 125 | 90 | 25 | 10 |
991 | Listen, pandemic puppies are expensive and we can really use the extra $600, so quit whining and give your little “brother” a treat. | 1.3600 | 0.05436 | 125 | 91 | 24 | 10 |
992 | Nonsense! I love you both exactly the same. | 1.3596 | 0.06826 | 89 | 65 | 16 | 8 |
993 | Okay, big deal, you're allergic to dogs. Just because we can't keep you, doesn't mean you won't find a forever family of your own. | 1.3592 | 0.05130 | 142 | 101 | 31 | 10 |
994 | Your mother and I feel you'll be every bit as happy as Tuffy was at boarding school." | 1.3592 | 0.05321 | 142 | 103 | 27 | 12 |
995 | whatever you do, don't tell him he's adopted! | 1.3592 | 0.04724 | 142 | 97 | 39 | 6 |
996 | I love you both the same. | 1.3592 | 0.05031 | 142 | 100 | 33 | 9 |
997 | Now, now, you shouldn’t be mad at Buster for being the teacher’s pet. | 1.3592 | 0.05226 | 142 | 102 | 29 | 11 |
998 | C'mon, Benji. I said I'm sorry, and promise not to switch your food bowls again. | 1.3592 | 0.05130 | 142 | 101 | 31 | 10 |
999 | I promise, your next shirt will have a collar. | 1.3592 | 0.04829 | 142 | 98 | 37 | 7 |
1000 | Buddy bit you because you weren't respecting his personal space. | 1.3592 | 0.04617 | 142 | 96 | 41 | 5 |
1001 | You’ve outgrown it, let him wear it. | 1.3592 | 0.05130 | 142 | 101 | 31 | 10 |
1002 | Say it, Conner. ‘Rigel is family, not some son-of-a-you-know-what.’ | 1.3592 | 0.05031 | 142 | 100 | 33 | 9 |
1003 | I think you’re going to be good friends. You’re adopted, too. | 1.3592 | 0.04931 | 142 | 99 | 35 | 8 |
1004 | Don't be mad, Billy. When daddy gets his old job back, he can send both of you to boarding school! | 1.3592 | 0.05226 | 142 | 102 | 29 | 11 |
1005 | Son,you have to be tolerant of our dog identifying as your brother. | 1.3592 | 0.05321 | 142 | 103 | 27 | 12 |
1006 | Son, you're old enough to learn about the facts of life. You'll never grow a tail. | 1.3592 | 0.05130 | 142 | 101 | 31 | 10 |
1007 | Because he's a lot more obedient than you. | 1.3592 | 0.04829 | 142 | 98 | 37 | 7 |
1008 | It's okay, Billy. I'm sure you'll be adopted next. | 1.3592 | 0.05505 | 142 | 105 | 23 | 14 |
1009 | Think of it as your first lesson in diversity training. | 1.3592 | 0.04931 | 142 | 99 | 35 | 8 |
1010 | C' mon son, it's just one little dance. You should have seen some of the dogs you grandmother fixed me up with! | 1.3592 | 0.05321 | 142 | 103 | 27 | 12 |
1011 | Sorry Timmy. I meant to say that Barkley is man’s best friend, not my best friend. | 1.3592 | 0.04724 | 142 | 97 | 39 | 6 |
1012 | I know you’re upset, buddy, but Scruffers’ social media engagement was up 23% this week and that’s why he gets to pick where we go for dinner. | 1.3592 | 0.05321 | 142 | 103 | 27 | 12 |
1013 | He's top dog, but you're my little man. | 1.3592 | 0.05031 | 142 | 100 | 33 | 9 |
1014 | It’s just for our TikTok dance. You’ll get it back, don’t worry. | 1.3592 | 0.05414 | 142 | 104 | 25 | 13 |
1015 | You were born first, but he’s older. | 1.3592 | 0.04931 | 142 | 99 | 35 | 8 |
1016 | C’mon son, you said you wanted a puppy and I needed an accountant. | 1.3592 | 0.04931 | 142 | 99 | 35 | 8 |
1017 | Well, you couldn't decide - puppy or little brother. | 1.3590 | 0.05624 | 117 | 83 | 26 | 8 |
1018 | You might want to try being more obedient. | 1.3586 | 0.05241 | 145 | 105 | 28 | 12 |
1019 | No, you don't have the same mother! | 1.3586 | 0.04862 | 145 | 101 | 36 | 8 |
1020 | You outgrew it, Bobby. Get over it. | 1.3586 | 0.04959 | 145 | 102 | 34 | 9 |
1021 | We had him before you. | 1.3586 | 0.05055 | 145 | 103 | 32 | 10 |
1022 | And for you, there's always public school. | 1.3586 | 0.04762 | 145 | 100 | 38 | 7 |
1023 | We don’t love you equally. We love you accordingly. | 1.3586 | 0.04959 | 145 | 102 | 34 | 9 |
1024 | Look Fido, we got you a little boy to play with. | 1.3586 | 0.05055 | 145 | 103 | 32 | 10 |
1025 | Calm down. Your brother's bark is worse than his bite. | 1.3586 | 0.05149 | 145 | 104 | 30 | 11 |
1026 | Go ahead...shake. | 1.3586 | 0.04959 | 145 | 102 | 34 | 9 |
1027 | Well, it just so happens, he IS a son of a bitch! | 1.3586 | 0.04660 | 145 | 99 | 40 | 6 |
1028 | Of course I love you as much as Prince. | 1.3586 | 0.05007 | 145 | 105 | 29 | 11 |
1029 | His YouTube videos earn more than I! So we decided to adopt him | 1.3586 | 0.05149 | 145 | 104 | 30 | 11 |
1030 | Don’t worry son, your breath smells much better. | 1.3586 | 0.05149 | 145 | 104 | 30 | 11 |
1031 | Sorry Billy, we can only afford for one of you to go to private school. | 1.3586 | 0.05241 | 145 | 105 | 28 | 12 |
1032 | # "Now just because we had him first, doesn't mean we like you less." | 1.3586 | 0.05055 | 145 | 103 | 32 | 10 |
1033 | No, it only works when HE gives me the puppy dog eyes. | 1.3582 | 0.05545 | 134 | 98 | 24 | 12 |
1034 | He’s not better than you, Timmy...just better dressed. | 1.3582 | 0.05443 | 134 | 97 | 26 | 11 |
1035 | Are you sure you didn't eat his homework this time? | 1.3582 | 0.05125 | 134 | 94 | 32 | 8 |
1036 | It's OK. You can be Big Lord Fauntleroy. | 1.3581 | 0.04498 | 148 | 105 | 35 | 8 |
1037 | Look on the bright side. He doesn’t like mac and cheese. | 1.3581 | 0.04599 | 148 | 101 | 41 | 6 |
1038 | BECAUSE HE'S OLDER, THAT'S WHY | 1.3581 | 0.04795 | 148 | 103 | 37 | 8 |
1039 | No Chester, you’re only fraternal twins. | 1.3581 | 0.04698 | 148 | 102 | 39 | 7 |
1040 | It was at this very moment, locked away in his subconscious, that Johnny realized his parents were a little different | 1.3577 | 0.05552 | 123 | 88 | 26 | 9 |
1041 | You've got to admit that he's more fashion conscious. | 1.3577 | 0.05256 | 137 | 98 | 29 | 10 |
1042 | But it’s not your turn to be President. | 1.3577 | 0.05457 | 137 | 100 | 25 | 12 |
1043 | No, he's not a sissy. He's just well-bred. | 1.3571 | 0.04974 | 140 | 98 | 34 | 8 |
1044 | Why can’t you be more like Endicott? | 1.3571 | 0.04974 | 140 | 98 | 34 | 8 |
1045 | I know... but they really don't fit you any more. | 1.3571 | 0.04974 | 140 | 98 | 34 | 8 |
1046 | What do you care? You know you've outgrown that suit. | 1.3571 | 0.04974 | 140 | 98 | 34 | 8 |
1047 | He just has a better pedigree.. | 1.3571 | 0.04974 | 140 | 98 | 34 | 8 |
1048 | Stop fighting it Chip, he got an A in Obedience. | 1.3571 | 0.04869 | 140 | 97 | 36 | 7 |
1049 | You can’t call her that, she’s your sister. | 1.3571 | 0.05076 | 140 | 99 | 32 | 9 |
1050 | But you too are a good boy! | 1.3571 | 0.05176 | 140 | 100 | 30 | 10 |
1051 | He can't even HAVE chocolate | 1.3571 | 0.04869 | 140 | 97 | 36 | 7 |
1052 | Billy, this was the closest they had to Stuart Little | 1.3571 | 0.05176 | 140 | 100 | 30 | 10 |
1053 | It's not so bad. You at least have opposable thumbs. | 1.3571 | 0.05076 | 140 | 99 | 32 | 9 |
1054 | I don't know why you're so jealous. You're both adopted. | 1.3571 | 0.05176 | 140 | 100 | 30 | 10 |
1055 | Just one Instagram post for mommy and that's it. I promise. | 1.3571 | 0.04763 | 140 | 96 | 38 | 6 |
1056 | He is MY therapy dog, and you can't touch him! | 1.3571 | 0.05098 | 126 | 87 | 33 | 6 |
1057 | He sits, stays and begs - what do you do? | 1.3571 | 0.05176 | 140 | 100 | 30 | 10 |
1058 | Obedience school will be great for you also. | 1.3571 | 0.05176 | 140 | 100 | 30 | 10 |
1059 | You always said that you wanted a dog. | 1.3571 | 0.05371 | 140 | 102 | 26 | 12 |
1060 | You're not upset because I named him Edward Junior, are you Rex? | 1.3571 | 0.05275 | 140 | 101 | 28 | 11 |
1061 | But Mom and I DID get you a dog. | 1.3571 | 0.04869 | 140 | 97 | 36 | 7 |
1062 | Well he’s doing it, and he was raised by wolves. | 1.3571 | 0.04869 | 140 | 97 | 36 | 7 |
1063 | Billy, just throw the ball and say "fetch!" You'll get it back. | 1.3571 | 0.04763 | 140 | 96 | 38 | 6 |
1064 | I’m sorry Timmy, but we can only afford to send one of you to boarding school. | 1.3571 | 0.05275 | 140 | 101 | 28 | 11 |
1065 | I knew we should have stopped after one. | 1.3571 | 0.05076 | 140 | 99 | 32 | 9 |
1066 | Oh great, another totally untrained Therapy Boy. | 1.3571 | 0.05176 | 140 | 100 | 30 | 10 |
1067 | When you're an adult, and April 15th rolls around, you'll want as many dependents as you can get. | 1.3571 | 0.04974 | 140 | 98 | 34 | 8 |
1068 | The teacher’s pet did not eat your homework. | 1.3566 | 0.05100 | 143 | 102 | 31 | 10 |
1069 | No you're still my favorite, Lucky just got accepted at a better school than you did. | 1.3566 | 0.05195 | 143 | 102 | 29 | 11 |
1070 | You can have your dog back as soon as we finish this TikTok! | 1.3566 | 0.05289 | 143 | 104 | 27 | 12 |
1071 | I don’t know why you think I love him more...I love all dogs more. | 1.3566 | 0.04903 | 143 | 100 | 35 | 8 |
1072 | No, Timmy, for the last time this isn’t your sister after getting the vaccine. | 1.3565 | 0.06075 | 115 | 85 | 19 | 11 |
1073 | I still love you son, but your Dad can only have one best friend. | 1.3562 | 0.04464 | 160 | 110 | 43 | 7 |
1074 | I don’t play favorites, he just brought me more joy in 2020. | 1.3562 | 0.05026 | 146 | 104 | 32 | 10 |
1075 | He didn't eat his own homework. | 1.3561 | 0.05060 | 132 | 92 | 33 | 7 |
1076 | You’re good enough, smart enough, and doggone it, people like you. | 1.3561 | 0.05498 | 132 | 96 | 25 | 11 |
1077 | This is who you'll be competing against for my love and attention. | 1.3559 | 0.05584 | 118 | 84 | 26 | 8 |
1078 | Sharing is caring, Billy. Look how cute he looks in your clothes!” | 1.3556 | 0.05201 | 135 | 96 | 30 | 9 |
1079 | Life lesson 1: It’s a dog’s world! | 1.3556 | 0.05201 | 135 | 96 | 30 | 9 |
1080 | Now, lick and make up. | 1.3556 | 0.04984 | 135 | 94 | 34 | 7 |
1081 | Have you ever won me five grand? | 1.3551 | 0.05224 | 138 | 99 | 29 | 10 |
1082 | You're so lucky. He was the last one left in the pet shop. | 1.3551 | 0.05018 | 138 | 97 | 33 | 8 |
1083 | Jimmy, I know that Ranger got to poop in the grass, but you have to wait until we get home. | 1.3551 | 0.05325 | 138 | 100 | 27 | 11 |
1084 | Perhaps not the sibling you envisioned, but he will grow on you. | 1.3551 | 0.05325 | 138 | 100 | 27 | 11 |
1085 | Oh, come on Billy... He may be cuter than you, smarter than you and dressed better than you, but YOU'RE still my son. | 1.3551 | 0.04802 | 138 | 95 | 37 | 6 |
1086 | He passed obedience school. You didn't, so he gets the suit. | 1.3551 | 0.04577 | 138 | 93 | 41 | 4 |
1087 | Come on son, be a good sport. You never liked that suit anyway. | 1.3551 | 0.05122 | 138 | 98 | 31 | 9 |
1088 | We will buy you another suit ,ok ? | 1.3551 | 0.05122 | 138 | 98 | 31 | 9 |
1089 | We love both of you equally. But it's just that your brother gets us more likes on social media. | 1.3551 | 0.05122 | 138 | 98 | 31 | 9 |
1090 | No Donnie, we're not counting the sticks again. Rags won fair and square. | 1.3551 | 0.05122 | 138 | 98 | 31 | 9 |
1091 | Don't tell your mother but I accidently left your brother at the dog shelter and took fido by mistake. | 1.3551 | 0.05224 | 138 | 99 | 29 | 10 |
1092 | C’mon now - let’s shake and make up. There’s no way this good little boy is the one who stole your ball. | 1.3551 | 0.05122 | 138 | 98 | 31 | 9 |
1093 | Fluffy didn’t mean to bite you. Next time be sure to use their chosen personal pronoun. | 1.3551 | 0.05018 | 138 | 97 | 33 | 8 |
1094 | C'mon. You know you've outgrown it. | 1.3551 | 0.05224 | 138 | 99 | 29 | 10 |
1095 | Unacceptable Donald. Sparky is right. Never bite the hand that feeds you. | 1.3551 | 0.05122 | 138 | 98 | 31 | 9 |
1096 | Listen son, Mom tried for a baby brother for you, but this is the best she could do. | 1.3551 | 0.05018 | 138 | 97 | 33 | 8 |
1097 | No, Richie, this is a Dachshund, not a Chihuahua. Please stop stamping your feet and shouting about building a wall. | 1.3551 | 0.05423 | 138 | 101 | 25 | 12 |
1098 | What say we go the park only this time you get to chase the squirrels. | 1.3551 | 0.05018 | 138 | 97 | 33 | 8 |
1099 | Now tell him your sorry you ate his treat. | 1.3551 | 0.05122 | 138 | 98 | 31 | 9 |
1100 | OK, So, maybe, he is the Alpha Male, but, he can’t eat chocolate! | 1.3551 | 0.05423 | 138 | 101 | 25 | 12 |
1101 | Don't feel bad. To me you're all best in show | 1.3551 | 0.05122 | 138 | 98 | 31 | 9 |
1102 | We've been over this. He gets your clothes, you sleep in his basket. | 1.3551 | 0.05325 | 138 | 100 | 27 | 11 |
1103 | Don’t worry, a Mormon Mission is only a few months in dog years, he’ll be back before you know it. | 1.3551 | 0.05224 | 138 | 99 | 29 | 10 |
1104 | Donald I told you many times. The count is over and Joe is now our favorite. | 1.3551 | 0.05224 | 138 | 99 | 29 | 10 |
1105 | ‘Listen Jimmy, he shits on the floor because he’s a dog. You do it out of sheer defiance’ | 1.3551 | 0.05224 | 138 | 99 | 29 | 10 |
1106 | Why cant you be more like your brother? He’s a good boy. | 1.3548 | 0.06422 | 93 | 67 | 19 | 7 |
1107 | Yes, but you've got some nice new shoes | 1.3546 | 0.04945 | 141 | 99 | 34 | 8 |
1108 | He EARNED those clothes. | 1.3546 | 0.05146 | 141 | 101 | 30 | 10 |
1109 | Your brothers adopted. | 1.3546 | 0.05146 | 141 | 101 | 30 | 10 |
1110 | Because when I ask him to fetch something, he does. | 1.3546 | 0.05526 | 141 | 105 | 22 | 14 |
1111 | Did you eat your brother’s homework? | 1.3546 | 0.04945 | 141 | 99 | 34 | 8 |
1112 | No, I said tutored. | 1.3546 | 0.05243 | 141 | 102 | 28 | 11 |
1113 | He just wants you to apologize for saying he was adopted. | 1.3546 | 0.05243 | 141 | 102 | 28 | 11 |
1114 | It’s just not fair, he’s had like 4 birthdays this year!! | 1.3546 | 0.04517 | 141 | 95 | 42 | 4 |
1115 | Who's a good boy? Who's a good boy now | 1.3546 | 0.04945 | 141 | 99 | 34 | 8 |
1116 | Remember, Bobby: Always dress for the treat you want, not for the treat you have. | 1.3546 | 0.04945 | 141 | 99 | 34 | 8 |
1117 | C'mon Timmy, you'll love the dog park. You got to choose last week! | 1.3546 | 0.04627 | 141 | 96 | 40 | 5 |
1118 | Clearly, he paid more attention to my ‘be a good boy’ this year. | 1.3546 | 0.04517 | 141 | 95 | 42 | 4 |
1119 | Hey, look at the big picture, you are likely to outlive him by 70 years. | 1.3538 | 0.04988 | 130 | 90 | 34 | 6 |
1120 | Now, now Bobby—I'm sure that when Bingo said 'who's a bitch now?', he meant it as a compliment. | 1.3538 | 0.05106 | 130 | 91 | 32 | 7 |
1121 | I know you don't like to share your stuff, but you have to admit he wears it better than you do. | 1.3538 | 0.05106 | 130 | 91 | 32 | 7 |
1122 | Just because he's not wearing his mask, doesn't mean you don't have to. | 1.3534 | 0.05140 | 133 | 94 | 31 | 8 |
1123 | My matchmaker said walking a dog and a child would increase my odds...Now let’s go! | 1.3529 | 0.05063 | 136 | 96 | 32 | 8 |
1124 | And when you're a good boy, you can wear the suit. | 1.3525 | 0.04988 | 139 | 98 | 33 | 8 |
1125 | Sure he beat you. He is a Boxer. | 1.3525 | 0.04882 | 139 | 97 | 35 | 7 |
1126 | You know I love the two of you just the same. | 1.3525 | 0.05193 | 139 | 100 | 29 | 10 |
1127 | Believe me, son, you don't want to get neutered, too. | 1.3525 | 0.05486 | 139 | 103 | 23 | 13 |
1128 | Play nice with your brother, even though he is a son of a bitch. | 1.3525 | 0.05292 | 139 | 101 | 27 | 11 |
1129 | Just this once, you be the one to go fetch the stick. | 1.3525 | 0.04664 | 139 | 95 | 39 | 5 |
1130 | C'mon, just tap dance with him for one minute so I can put it on Tik Tok. | 1.3525 | 0.04774 | 139 | 96 | 37 | 6 |
1131 | When are you going to be more like your brother? | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1132 | Cheer up. You’re my second-best friend. | 1.3525 | 0.04988 | 139 | 98 | 33 | 8 |
1133 | If your mother wasn't such a bitch, you'd have a normal brother. | 1.3525 | 0.05292 | 139 | 101 | 27 | 11 |
1134 | Don’t pout. Your life expectancy is seven times what his is. | 1.3525 | 0.05390 | 139 | 102 | 25 | 12 |
1135 | Please Brian, act Normal. We need this sibling discount to work. " | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1136 | He’s so well behaved. There’s no way he ate your homework. | 1.3525 | 0.04988 | 139 | 98 | 33 | 8 |
1137 | Well, he's a little gentleman and you're not. | 1.3525 | 0.04988 | 139 | 98 | 33 | 8 |
1138 | We talked about this yesterday buddy. He doesn't need to wear shoes but you can take yours off as soon as we get home. | 1.3525 | 0.05193 | 139 | 100 | 29 | 10 |
1139 | He's sorry he forgot it was casual Friday. | 1.3525 | 0.04882 | 139 | 97 | 35 | 7 |
1140 | We enrolled him in finishing day care. | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1141 | Ruff aced his obedience school exam so mommy and I decided to let you go. | 1.3525 | 0.05390 | 139 | 102 | 25 | 12 |
1142 | Don't make me put your leash on! | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1143 | You weren’t wearing it and it’s Rover’s first day at obedience School. | 1.3525 | 0.04882 | 139 | 97 | 35 | 7 |
1144 | Well, if you’re good, you can wear the “good boy” suit. | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1145 | Honey,it was a joke! Of course I don't think mommy's a b****. | 1.3525 | 0.05390 | 139 | 102 | 25 | 12 |
1146 | Hey buddy - second best friend is still really good! | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1147 | You'll like obedience school. Just ask your sister. | 1.3525 | 0.05193 | 139 | 100 | 29 | 10 |
1148 | Come on now, be my emotional support child. | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1149 | It’s alright, we’ll practice the trick again tomorrow and maybe you can get a treat too. | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1150 | I'll tell you wha. Next time you can eat his homework. | 1.3525 | 0.04882 | 139 | 97 | 35 | 7 |
1151 | What's with the 2020 attitude? | 1.3525 | 0.05142 | 139 | 102 | 26 | 11 |
1152 | Cheer up,Charlie. I told you this would happen when you quit piano lessons in the first place. | 1.3525 | 0.04551 | 139 | 94 | 41 | 4 |
1153 | I know, he’s always overdressed for these things. | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1154 | Don't worry kid, you are a good boy too. Just not that good. | 1.3525 | 0.04882 | 139 | 97 | 35 | 7 |
1155 | He's just more suited to the pedagogy of a private school education. | 1.3525 | 0.05486 | 139 | 103 | 23 | 13 |
1156 | When you get your anger management issues under control you'll get to wear cute outfits too. | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1157 | Billy,please stop telling your brother babies don’t come from the rescue shelter. | 1.3525 | 0.04988 | 139 | 98 | 33 | 8 |
1158 | Oh, come on. You outgrew it last year. | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1159 | Okay, we’ll switch names. You can be Rodney and he’ll be Fido. | 1.3525 | 0.04774 | 139 | 96 | 37 | 6 |
1160 | Sorry son, dog is man's best friend. | 1.3525 | 0.04882 | 139 | 97 | 35 | 7 |
1161 | Timmy, it’s my job to be your parent—not your best friend. | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1162 | “Why can’t you be more like your brother? See, he’s so well behaved” | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1163 | We even got you a classmate while you learn from home! | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1164 | Hey, buddy, he already apologized for calling you "adopted." | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1165 | I asked you to attend obedience school. | 1.3525 | 0.04774 | 139 | 96 | 37 | 6 |
1166 | It looks like someone else also had a “ruff” day. | 1.3525 | 0.05390 | 139 | 102 | 25 | 12 |
1167 | You have to be more specific Billy, Daisy didn't know you wanted to play football when you told her to suit up | 1.3525 | 0.05193 | 139 | 100 | 29 | 10 |
1168 | see all the good that obedience school did for coco | 1.3525 | 0.04882 | 139 | 97 | 35 | 7 |
1169 | There's no shame in being man's second best friend. | 1.3525 | 0.04988 | 139 | 98 | 33 | 8 |
1170 | I'm sorry, but the dog makes more money on the internet. | 1.3525 | 0.04882 | 139 | 97 | 35 | 7 |
1171 | There there; now be a good boy like your brother. | 1.3525 | 0.04882 | 139 | 97 | 35 | 7 |
1172 | Try to behave at nursery today, or we'll be taking you to see Dr Pavlov too | 1.3525 | 0.05292 | 139 | 101 | 27 | 11 |
1173 | Time for your walks! Daddy’s got 5 more Zooms today | 1.3525 | 0.05292 | 139 | 101 | 27 | 11 |
1174 | You're a good boy. It's just that Rudy is WAY better. | 1.3525 | 0.04988 | 139 | 98 | 33 | 8 |
1175 | Which one of you shit on the carpet? | 1.3525 | 0.05486 | 139 | 103 | 23 | 13 |
1176 | You’re a good boy, you really are. You’re just not the goodest boy | 1.3525 | 0.05092 | 139 | 99 | 31 | 9 |
1177 | He’s got four A levels, Simon! | 1.3525 | 0.04882 | 139 | 97 | 35 | 7 |
1178 | No, you cannot play "go fetch". | 1.3517 | 0.04646 | 145 | 100 | 39 | 6 |
1179 | Look, if you were known as "man's best friend," then I would like you more. | 1.3517 | 0.05228 | 145 | 106 | 27 | 12 |
1180 | I'm sorry, but we have to re-home you. | 1.3507 | 0.05217 | 134 | 96 | 29 | 9 |
1181 | Don't take it personally Russell. 'Good boy' is something you just say automatically to dogs. | 1.3507 | 0.04998 | 134 | 94 | 33 | 7 |
1182 | You had four years to be my son, Donald. It’s Buddy’s turn now, ok? | 1.3507 | 0.05324 | 134 | 97 | 27 | 10 |
1183 | Because when he does it, it's cute. | 1.3507 | 0.04884 | 134 | 93 | 35 | 6 |
1184 | Remember, a deal is a deal. He wears your clothes today and tomorrow you poop in the park. | 1.3504 | 0.05032 | 137 | 97 | 32 | 8 |
1185 | Come on Johnny, Precious is just the name he came with from the shelter. | 1.3504 | 0.05241 | 137 | 99 | 28 | 10 |
1186 | Fuss all you want; his PSAT scores were better than your's, too. | 1.3500 | 0.05507 | 120 | 86 | 26 | 8 |
1187 | When I said he was a member of the family, I meant it. | 1.3500 | 0.05378 | 120 | 85 | 28 | 7 |
1188 | Well, it is your turn to fetch the ball.... | 1.3490 | 0.04658 | 149 | 104 | 38 | 7 |
1189 | If Rover can learn to be a good boy, I'm sure you can, too. | 1.3490 | 0.04849 | 149 | 106 | 34 | 9 |
1190 | Badly dressed, misbehaved… My humans are an embarrassment… | 1.3488 | 0.05574 | 129 | 95 | 23 | 11 |
1191 | Now Jimmy, Sparky got a scholarship and you didn't. You'll like public school. | 1.3485 | 0.05156 | 132 | 94 | 30 | 8 |
1192 | Come on Son, who is really to blame when a pointing finger gets bit? | 1.3485 | 0.04927 | 132 | 92 | 34 | 6 |
1193 | Don't feel bad, Liam, I know everyone says Vincent got mommy's looks but you have her personality. | 1.3485 | 0.05156 | 132 | 94 | 30 | 8 |
1194 | He doesn’t ask questions. | 1.3485 | 0.05267 | 132 | 95 | 28 | 9 |
1195 | Having different fire hydrant privileges doesn't mean I don't love you both. | 1.3485 | 0.05043 | 132 | 93 | 32 | 7 |
1196 | Henry, it’s not nice to call your sister a bitch. | 1.3485 | 0.05156 | 132 | 94 | 30 | 8 |
1197 | You can wear the suit next week. | 1.3485 | 0.05156 | 132 | 94 | 30 | 8 |
1198 | Don’t call your stepmother that. | 1.3485 | 0.05156 | 132 | 94 | 30 | 8 |
1199 | Be nice to your brother, Jimmy. He’s a pure breed. | 1.3485 | 0.05376 | 132 | 96 | 26 | 10 |
1200 | Ok, so the in vitro didn't exactly work, but your mother and I still love both of you. | 1.3485 | 0.05267 | 132 | 95 | 28 | 9 |
1201 | Cheer up! At least you're not the middle child. | 1.3485 | 0.05043 | 132 | 93 | 32 | 7 |
1202 | This IS the new normal | 1.3485 | 0.04927 | 132 | 92 | 34 | 6 |
1203 | cheer up bud, all you gotta do is start listening | 1.3485 | 0.05212 | 132 | 97 | 25 | 10 |
1204 | I am sorry but I couldn't afford to send both of you to Training Camp ! | 1.3481 | 0.05394 | 135 | 99 | 25 | 11 |
1205 | Look my dear, no need to be anxious, the vaccine is perfectly safe.. Back in our days, your mom and I got it and look how nice your baby brother turned out. | 1.3478 | 0.05107 | 138 | 99 | 30 | 9 |
1206 | I know you miss your friends, but meet Rover! He's just as desperate as you are for human contact and at least he can't give you Covid | 1.3475 | 0.05565 | 118 | 85 | 25 | 8 |
1207 | Hey,buddy... he was easier to train. | 1.3471 | 0.05341 | 121 | 86 | 28 | 7 |
1208 | What can I say? Your mother was a bitch. | 1.3462 | 0.05429 | 130 | 95 | 25 | 10 |
1209 | Jealousy is normal, Timmy. But be glad you got the recessive genes. | 1.3462 | 0.05204 | 130 | 93 | 29 | 8 |
1210 | And you expect me to believe that he pooped in the garden? | 1.3459 | 0.05124 | 133 | 95 | 30 | 8 |
1211 | No more bunking with Cooper here. We built you a nice little house in the backyard. | 1.3451 | 0.05299 | 113 | 79 | 29 | 5 |
1212 | Yes, he dresses himself, but you were standing upright way before him | 1.3451 | 0.05865 | 113 | 83 | 21 | 9 |
1213 | Gimme your paw...there’s a good boy! | 1.3451 | 0.05999 | 113 | 84 | 19 | 10 |
1214 | Don’t be upset, Fido is an influencer and pays our bills. | 1.3451 | 0.05589 | 113 | 81 | 25 | 7 |
1215 | He identifies as your little brother | 1.3451 | 0.05148 | 113 | 78 | 31 | 4 |
1216 | Son, every dog has its day. | 1.3448 | 0.05757 | 116 | 85 | 22 | 9 |
1217 | I do not have favorites,you are my boy and he is my champion. | 1.3445 | 0.05778 | 119 | 88 | 21 | 10 |
1218 | I've done it! I've proven that school uniforms promote good behavior. | 1.3440 | 0.05218 | 125 | 89 | 29 | 7 |
1219 | Now, Joey, being the only “real” boy in obedience school isn’t a bad thing—it actually gives you an edge. | 1.3440 | 0.05341 | 125 | 90 | 27 | 8 |
1220 | It's a step up from Stuart Little | 1.3438 | 0.05136 | 128 | 91 | 30 | 7 |
1221 | He’s the only friend you have right now. | 1.3438 | 0.05136 | 128 | 91 | 30 | 7 |
1222 | We are going walkies with your brother, little Lord Fauntleroy. | 1.3435 | 0.05394 | 131 | 96 | 25 | 10 |
1223 | Hey, don’t be mad. He may be man’s best friend, but you’re still my son." | 1.3435 | 0.05171 | 131 | 94 | 29 | 8 |
1224 | He ain't Havanese, he's your brother. | 1.3435 | 0.05501 | 131 | 97 | 23 | 11 |
1225 | Come on, Tommy. Don't be angry. I am only your trainer, not your dad. | 1.3433 | 0.05092 | 134 | 96 | 30 | 8 |
1226 | Yes Spencer, it's true, our Mr. Boswell edged you out for that preschool spot. But be the bigger man here, O.K.? Spencer? | 1.3421 | 0.04957 | 114 | 78 | 33 | 3 |
1227 | I do not like him best! | 1.3421 | 0.04769 | 152 | 109 | 34 | 9 |
1228 | Can you follow his example and be a good boy too? | 1.3419 | 0.05715 | 117 | 86 | 22 | 9 |
1229 | Start behaving like a good boy and you can live inside too. | 1.3419 | 0.05842 | 117 | 87 | 20 | 10 |
1230 | You’ll understand one day when you have children. | 1.3419 | 0.05584 | 117 | 85 | 24 | 8 |
1231 | Son it’s time you accepted he’s Puritan. | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1232 | Ok Sam, meet your new neighbour, Buster Brown. | 1.3417 | 0.05225 | 120 | 85 | 29 | 6 |
1233 | Play nice, Billy, safe play dates are hard to find these days. | 1.3411 | 0.05103 | 129 | 92 | 30 | 7 |
1234 | Now, Timmy, I want you to tell Max you're sorry you teased him about being adopted. | 1.3411 | 0.05335 | 129 | 94 | 26 | 9 |
1235 | C'm on, you wouldn't know what to do with a bone ..! | 1.3411 | 0.05103 | 129 | 92 | 30 | 7 |
1236 | You can pee on the fire hydrant next time. | 1.3411 | 0.05103 | 129 | 92 | 30 | 7 |
1237 | You'll get a treat too when YOU learn to poop outside. | 1.3411 | 0.05220 | 129 | 93 | 28 | 8 |
1238 | When covid is over we will get you real friends. | 1.3411 | 0.05335 | 129 | 94 | 26 | 9 |
1239 | Well, he simply is a better boy than you. | 1.3411 | 0.05447 | 129 | 95 | 24 | 10 |
1240 | He's your new tutor. | 1.3411 | 0.05220 | 129 | 93 | 28 | 8 |
1241 | Yes, he gets lots of attention, but you've got taco Tuesdays and opposable thumbs. | 1.3411 | 0.04733 | 129 | 89 | 36 | 4 |
1242 | Don’t be ridiculous, Tommy, I love both of you equally. | 1.3411 | 0.05447 | 129 | 95 | 24 | 10 |
1243 | It's not Loki's fault that his school is open and yours is still closed. | 1.3411 | 0.05103 | 129 | 92 | 30 | 7 |
1244 | You KNOW it embarrasses Fido when you try to chase squirrels during our walks. | 1.3411 | 0.05220 | 129 | 93 | 28 | 8 |
1245 | He's just like you, just cuter | 1.3411 | 0.04859 | 129 | 90 | 34 | 5 |
1246 | I don’t care who it was that chewed through my shoes but I’ll need an apology from each of you. | 1.3411 | 0.04983 | 129 | 91 | 32 | 6 |
1247 | Now Daddy is going to dress you up like a dog and post the whole thing on social media. | 1.3409 | 0.05139 | 132 | 95 | 29 | 8 |
1248 | You are BOTH my best friends. | 1.3409 | 0.04667 | 132 | 91 | 37 | 4 |
1249 | 'I SAID, "Sit!!!"' | 1.3409 | 0.05250 | 132 | 96 | 27 | 9 |
1250 | And who else has been a good boy!? | 1.3409 | 0.05139 | 132 | 95 | 29 | 8 |
1251 | Time for you to stand on your own two feet, too! | 1.3409 | 0.06236 | 88 | 63 | 20 | 5 |
1252 | We know you wanted a little brother so we compromised and taught the dog to walk. | 1.3409 | 0.05250 | 132 | 96 | 27 | 9 |
1253 | Next time I ask, ‘Who’s a good boy,’ maybe it will be you. | 1.3409 | 0.04908 | 132 | 93 | 33 | 6 |
1254 | Careful. Dog is watching you. | 1.3409 | 0.05250 | 132 | 96 | 27 | 9 |
1255 | Charlie bit me! | 1.3409 | 0.05250 | 132 | 96 | 27 | 9 |
1256 | ...and he's a snappier dresser. | 1.3409 | 0.05250 | 132 | 96 | 27 | 9 |
1257 | It's what you wanted. A little dog who could be a member of the family | 1.3409 | 0.05359 | 132 | 97 | 25 | 10 |
1258 | Your mother and I have decided to finally tell you: You're adopted. | 1.3409 | 0.05359 | 132 | 97 | 25 | 10 |
1259 | Of course you’re my favorite child! | 1.3409 | 0.05025 | 132 | 94 | 31 | 7 |
1260 | I’m NOT wearing a leash if he’s not’ | 1.3409 | 0.05359 | 132 | 97 | 25 | 10 |
1261 | It was at that precise moment George realised he was no longer ‘top dog’ of the family . | 1.3409 | 0.05025 | 132 | 94 | 31 | 7 |
1262 | See, son?The new vaccine is totally safe! Don’t be scared! | 1.3409 | 0.05250 | 132 | 96 | 27 | 9 |
1263 | son, please respect your brother's decision to be transspecie | 1.3409 | 0.05025 | 132 | 94 | 31 | 7 |
1264 | That charter canine obedience school truly exceeded my expectations ... just sayin' ... | 1.3394 | 0.05564 | 109 | 78 | 25 | 6 |
1265 | Yes, Sam, Jessie is cute and clever, but you will always have your White privilege. | 1.3394 | 0.05861 | 109 | 80 | 21 | 8 |
1266 | I thought I had two very good boys, but unless you change your attitude, I think it might just be one. | 1.3393 | 0.05314 | 112 | 79 | 28 | 5 |
1267 | Just remember that YOU wanted a puppy. | 1.3393 | 0.05314 | 112 | 79 | 28 | 5 |
1268 | Come on Jake, it’s time to go to your brother’s Obedience School graduation. Aren’t you so proud of our valedictorian! | 1.3393 | 0.05750 | 112 | 82 | 22 | 8 |
1269 | Hey little buddy, it's your turn to take him on his business trip." | 1.3393 | 0.05750 | 112 | 82 | 22 | 8 |
1270 | The nice pants are only for those fully potty trained. | 1.3393 | 0.05463 | 112 | 80 | 26 | 6 |
1271 | Well he's the older one because we count in dog years. | 1.3393 | 0.05463 | 112 | 80 | 26 | 6 |
1272 | That's how they dress in Germany. | 1.3390 | 0.05544 | 118 | 86 | 24 | 8 |
1273 | You'll have a suit like that when it's time for YOUR dog mitzvah. | 1.3386 | 0.05027 | 127 | 90 | 31 | 6 |
1274 | Listen, Tommy. One of us has to be the adult here and it might as well be Poochy. | 1.3386 | 0.05027 | 127 | 90 | 31 | 6 |
1275 | C’mon...during the pandemic we’ve come to love him as a son. | 1.3385 | 0.05411 | 130 | 96 | 24 | 10 |
1276 | Hey it's OK - You both hate cats. | 1.3385 | 0.04951 | 130 | 92 | 32 | 6 |
1277 | Oh, come now! I think you’re a good boy, too. | 1.3385 | 0.05186 | 130 | 94 | 28 | 8 |
1278 | You need to show respect. In dog years he's old enough to be your father. | 1.3385 | 0.05300 | 130 | 95 | 26 | 9 |
1279 | Look at this way, Charlie. He’ll have to wear your hand-me-downs but you’ll never have to wear any of his. | 1.3385 | 0.04951 | 130 | 92 | 32 | 6 |
1280 | You are my son, but he is such a good boy | 1.3385 | 0.05411 | 130 | 96 | 24 | 10 |
1281 | He’s putting on the dog today. | 1.3385 | 0.05300 | 130 | 95 | 26 | 9 |
1282 | Not just yet, but once you turn 5 next year you'll be smarter than he is! | 1.3385 | 0.05300 | 130 | 95 | 26 | 9 |
1283 | If you want to be treated like Skippy, listen like Skippy. | 1.3385 | 0.04951 | 130 | 92 | 32 | 6 |
1284 | I know you were hoping for a baby brother but adopting dogs was in this year | 1.3385 | 0.05520 | 130 | 97 | 22 | 11 |
1285 | How many times do I have to tell you not to bite your brother? | 1.3385 | 0.05300 | 130 | 95 | 26 | 9 |
1286 | I know it seems unfair since we let your brother do it, but little boys just aren’t allowed to do their business on the sidewalk. | 1.3385 | 0.05070 | 130 | 93 | 30 | 7 |
1287 | Now Timmy, you apologize for saying he still looks like a mutt. | 1.3385 | 0.05300 | 130 | 95 | 26 | 9 |
1288 | But Tommy--look what Obedience Class did for Bowser. | 1.3385 | 0.05070 | 130 | 93 | 30 | 7 |
1289 | He's well-trained. What's your excuse? | 1.3385 | 0.05300 | 130 | 95 | 26 | 9 |
1290 | If you wanted to go to the park, all you had to do was ask! | 1.3385 | 0.05129 | 130 | 94 | 25 | 8 |
1291 | It looked just as nice on you as it does on him. | 1.3385 | 0.05300 | 130 | 95 | 26 | 9 |
1292 | One sniff and you’re friends forever | 1.3385 | 0.05070 | 130 | 93 | 30 | 7 |
1293 | But son, once you’re a man, he’ll be your best friend. | 1.3385 | 0.05070 | 130 | 93 | 30 | 7 |
1294 | Because he evolved while we were home with him during the pandemic. | 1.3385 | 0.05186 | 130 | 94 | 28 | 8 |
1295 | I couldn't get you a sister but this dog identifies itself as a girl | 1.3385 | 0.04951 | 130 | 92 | 32 | 6 |
1296 | Don’t worry, someday you’ll get to eat his homework too. | 1.3385 | 0.05070 | 130 | 93 | 30 | 7 |
1297 | ‘He’s just my best friend’ | 1.3385 | 0.05186 | 130 | 94 | 28 | 8 |
1298 | I am sorry you feel that way , but he is really my best friend . | 1.3364 | 0.05957 | 110 | 82 | 19 | 9 |
1299 | Just ignore him if he keeps hounding you. | 1.3364 | 0.05211 | 110 | 77 | 29 | 4 |
1300 | Just remember he is still not as smart as a CROW. | 1.3364 | 0.05368 | 110 | 78 | 27 | 5 |
1301 | Well, when you're a dog, Timmy, you won't have to do algebra either. | 1.3364 | 0.05816 | 110 | 81 | 21 | 8 |
1302 | Don't be so stingy, Tommy. The suit's too small for you now anyway. In return, Rover said you can use his water bowl anytime. | 1.3364 | 0.05671 | 110 | 80 | 23 | 7 |
1303 | I'm not sure who took whose homework, but I need the two of you to work this out. | 1.3364 | 0.05816 | 110 | 81 | 21 | 8 |
1304 | It’s not my fault you’re just an okay boy | 1.3364 | 0.05368 | 110 | 78 | 27 | 5 |
1305 | Alex wants to be a good boy, doesn't he--yes, he does! | 1.3363 | 0.05567 | 113 | 82 | 24 | 7 |
1306 | Be nice, now. Spot just wants to take you for a walk. | 1.3363 | 0.05707 | 113 | 83 | 22 | 8 |
1307 | Meet your new caregiver,she has 70 years of experience working with kids. She will help you with your online classes and take you for walks during recess. | 1.3363 | 0.05707 | 113 | 83 | 22 | 8 |
1308 | Don't worry, son. He won't be able to learn any new tricks in a few years. | 1.3363 | 0.05423 | 113 | 81 | 26 | 6 |
1309 | I don't expect you to roll over but you could at least shake. | 1.3360 | 0.05441 | 125 | 92 | 24 | 9 |
1310 | But dogs don't need shoes, Jimmy. And just a warning: next week he won't be wearing pants either. | 1.3360 | 0.05441 | 125 | 92 | 24 | 9 |
1311 | No, Billy, people use fire hydrants for other things. | 1.3360 | 0.05199 | 125 | 90 | 28 | 7 |
1312 | Even after his father reassured him Billy still wasn’t sure Theodore was the adopted one | 1.3360 | 0.04944 | 125 | 88 | 32 | 5 |
1313 | Now Timmy, you know you can’t make Fauntleroy eat your homework if he just had lunch. | 1.3360 | 0.05073 | 125 | 89 | 30 | 6 |
1314 | Don't worry, your not going to grow a tail ! | 1.3360 | 0.05441 | 125 | 92 | 24 | 9 |
1315 | Having a baby as practise for a puppy definitely paid off. | 1.3360 | 0.05321 | 125 | 91 | 26 | 8 |
1316 | I know you're hungry, Andrew, but Basker's been a good dog. You've got to give up that treat. | 1.3360 | 0.05558 | 125 | 93 | 22 | 10 |
1317 | When you are 49 in dog years you'll get a suit too, son. | 1.3360 | 0.05321 | 125 | 91 | 26 | 8 |
1318 | Why can’t you be more like your brother, Bobby? | 1.3360 | 0.05199 | 125 | 90 | 28 | 7 |
1319 | Well, you refused to wear it, so now it's Tiko's. | 1.3360 | 0.05441 | 125 | 92 | 24 | 9 |
1320 | Cheer up, Daddy found a replacement to take over those awful violin lessons you hate. | 1.3360 | 0.05199 | 125 | 90 | 28 | 7 |
1321 | You will always have my DNA. | 1.3360 | 0.05199 | 125 | 90 | 28 | 7 |
1322 | Don't beg. | 1.3360 | 0.04812 | 125 | 87 | 34 | 4 |
1323 | I know, but it's the greeting he prefers. | 1.3360 | 0.05321 | 125 | 91 | 26 | 8 |
1324 | Aren't you glad mommy picks out your clothes | 1.3360 | 0.05073 | 125 | 89 | 30 | 6 |
1325 | Donald, maybe Santa will bring you a Lagerfeld suit NEXT Christmas. | 1.3360 | 0.04812 | 125 | 87 | 34 | 4 |
1326 | you outgrew it, you gave it to him, so deal with it. | 1.3360 | 0.05199 | 125 | 90 | 28 | 7 |
1327 | Good boy! Good boy! | 1.3360 | 0.05321 | 125 | 91 | 26 | 8 |
1328 | Don't think of it as losing a puppy, champ. Think of it as gaining a brother! | 1.3360 | 0.05441 | 125 | 92 | 24 | 9 |
1329 | When you learn to obey my commands you can have a nice suit too! | 1.3360 | 0.05321 | 125 | 91 | 26 | 8 |
1330 | Behave, like your brother, and you’ll get a treat! | 1.3360 | 0.05558 | 125 | 93 | 22 | 10 |
1331 | Sorry, Timmy, Versace only comes in his size. | 1.3360 | 0.05673 | 125 | 94 | 20 | 11 |
1332 | Who's a good boy? Yes, you are. | 1.3360 | 0.05073 | 125 | 89 | 30 | 6 |
1333 | What did you expect when you asked for a puppy brother? | 1.3360 | 0.05441 | 125 | 92 | 24 | 9 |
1334 | And one day you could grow up to be a good boy. | 1.3360 | 0.04944 | 125 | 88 | 32 | 5 |
1335 | You can get mad when you start fetching my slippers | 1.3360 | 0.05199 | 125 | 90 | 28 | 7 |
1336 | Don’t worry, Candice Bergen was in a similar situation and she got over it. | 1.3360 | 0.05441 | 125 | 92 | 24 | 9 |
1337 | I’ve told you son, it won’t be robots replacing us. | 1.3360 | 0.05073 | 125 | 89 | 30 | 6 |
1338 | Son, when you learn to behave like Skippy, we'll buy you fancy clothes too. | 1.3360 | 0.05558 | 125 | 93 | 22 | 10 |
1339 | ‘It’s called pedigree, Tommy.’ | 1.3360 | 0.05073 | 125 | 89 | 30 | 6 |
1340 | Who’s my second-best boy? Who’s my second-best boy? It’s you, Wally! Yes, it’s you, Wally! Good second-best Wally! | 1.3333 | 0.05496 | 123 | 91 | 23 | 9 |
1341 | Aw, being the teacher's pet isn't everything little buddy. | 1.3333 | 0.04421 | 123 | 88 | 31 | 4 |
1342 | Play nice. His bite is worse than his bark. | 1.3333 | 0.04988 | 123 | 87 | 31 | 5 |
1343 | When you finish obedience school, you can wear a suit too. | 1.3333 | 0.05120 | 123 | 88 | 29 | 6 |
1344 | He takes after Mom’s side of the family. | 1.3333 | 0.05248 | 123 | 89 | 27 | 7 |
1345 | And guess who's going to obedience school next if he doesn't behave himself. | 1.3333 | 0.04988 | 123 | 87 | 31 | 5 |
1346 | Before your mommy, I had another wife. | 1.3333 | 0.05734 | 123 | 93 | 19 | 11 |
1347 | Come on, Billy, be nice. One day he might be your best friend. | 1.3333 | 0.05095 | 108 | 75 | 30 | 3 |
1348 | Who's the second best boy in the world? | 1.3333 | 0.05734 | 123 | 93 | 19 | 11 |
1349 | If you don't behave I will make you wear a suit too! | 1.3333 | 0.05120 | 123 | 88 | 29 | 6 |
1350 | Don’t be upset, pal, man’s best friend is just an expression. | 1.3333 | 0.04852 | 123 | 86 | 33 | 4 |
1351 | Timmy could accept Buddy being allowed on the couch, but this was getting out of hand. | 1.3333 | 0.05285 | 126 | 92 | 26 | 8 |
1352 | Just give me your damn paw! | 1.3333 | 0.05374 | 123 | 90 | 25 | 8 |
1353 | We thought you'd be pleased-you get all of Mr Buttons balls and frisbees, and he gets the clothes that Grandma gets you. It's a win-win. | 1.3333 | 0.05424 | 108 | 77 | 26 | 5 |
1354 | Peter, did you dig a hole in the yard again? | 1.3333 | 0.05374 | 123 | 90 | 25 | 8 |
1355 | Son,it's called diversity and inclusion | 1.3333 | 0.05616 | 123 | 92 | 21 | 10 |
1356 | Don't be upset. He is a show dog. | 1.3333 | 0.05248 | 123 | 89 | 27 | 7 |
1357 | Don’t make me get the leash out! | 1.3333 | 0.05374 | 123 | 88 | 25 | 8 |
1358 | Next year, you can be best of show. | 1.3333 | 0.05496 | 123 | 91 | 23 | 9 |
1359 | Yes, Timmy, he’s adopted. But we love you both the same. | 1.3333 | 0.05248 | 123 | 89 | 27 | 7 |
1360 | And now you'll have a friend in obedience school! | 1.3333 | 0.05120 | 123 | 88 | 29 | 6 |
1361 | I've always wanted a son who obeys me. | 1.3333 | 0.05496 | 123 | 91 | 23 | 9 |
1362 | I think it’s nice that he wants to risk spoiling his suit by playing fetch with you!” | 1.3333 | 0.05734 | 108 | 79 | 22 | 7 |
1363 | Don’t worry, I definitely love you more than the cat. | 1.3333 | 0.04713 | 123 | 85 | 35 | 3 |
1364 | Meet your emotional deterrent animal. | 1.3333 | 0.05248 | 123 | 89 | 27 | 7 |
1365 | Don’t worry, in a few dog years you’ll be an only child. | 1.3333 | 0.05616 | 123 | 92 | 21 | 10 |
1366 | No fire hydrants. | 1.3333 | 0.05466 | 120 | 88 | 24 | 8 |
1367 | I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to give him your shoes. | 1.3333 | 0.05120 | 123 | 88 | 29 | 6 |
1368 | Time for our walkies. | 1.3333 | 0.05291 | 117 | 84 | 27 | 6 |
1369 | Come on. Show him we are the superior animal. | 1.3333 | 0.05120 | 123 | 88 | 29 | 6 |
1370 | Just because he's my best friend doesn't mean I don't love you. | 1.3333 | 0.05801 | 102 | 74 | 22 | 6 |
1371 | Stop complaining. Mr. Woof wanted to wear the striped sweater but he's not complaining. | 1.3333 | 0.05581 | 108 | 78 | 24 | 6 |
1372 | Your mommy and I will still always love each other. | 1.3333 | 0.05248 | 123 | 89 | 27 | 7 |
1373 | On the other hand, obedience isn’t for everyone. | 1.3333 | 0.04988 | 123 | 87 | 31 | 5 |
1374 | Be happy for him, obedience school is open. | 1.3333 | 0.05374 | 123 | 90 | 25 | 8 |
1375 | You're my second best friend Billy. | 1.3333 | 0.05248 | 123 | 89 | 27 | 7 |
1376 | Well, Timmy, if you barked like Mr. Fluffy to go outside when you needed to use the restroom instead of going in your pants, you could wear a spiffy short suit too. | 1.3333 | 0.05496 | 123 | 91 | 23 | 9 |
1377 | I know you wanted a cat, but it wouldn’t wear the suit! | 1.3333 | 0.05374 | 123 | 90 | 25 | 8 |
1378 | We train our pets and indulge our children. | 1.3333 | 0.05734 | 108 | 79 | 22 | 7 |
1379 | It’s only funny when he says it. | 1.3333 | 0.04496 | 123 | 91 | 26 | 6 |
1380 | No, of course mummy and daddy don't have a favorite.. | 1.3333 | 0.04570 | 123 | 84 | 37 | 2 |
1381 | Now, now, William it's $600 per child. And besides Rudy has always been like a son to us. Now it's official. | 1.3333 | 0.05262 | 108 | 76 | 28 | 4 |
1382 | Why don’t you try being more like your brother, he listens... | 1.3333 | 0.05248 | 123 | 89 | 27 | 7 |
1383 | Meet your new stepbrother. | 1.3333 | 0.05374 | 123 | 90 | 25 | 8 |
1384 | Did I mention you’re both adopted? | 1.3333 | 0.05248 | 123 | 89 | 27 | 7 |
1385 | It’s not that we don’t love you Max, it’s just that Ralphy’s much lower maintenance.. | 1.3333 | 0.05120 | 123 | 88 | 29 | 6 |
1386 | You guys will each have your own rooms. | 1.3333 | 0.05248 | 123 | 89 | 27 | 7 |
1387 | The outfit doesn’t fit you anymore, so I didn’t think you’d mind. | 1.3333 | 0.05374 | 123 | 90 | 25 | 8 |
1388 | Sparky's been walking since he was 4 weeks. What's your excuse? | 1.3308 | 0.05198 | 133 | 98 | 26 | 9 |
1389 | Mommy and I agreed we needed another one that wouldn’t draw on walls or scream in supermarket aisles. | 1.3306 | 0.05337 | 124 | 91 | 25 | 8 |
1390 | Don’t be angry, Billy. You outgrew this suit last year and it’s only until Daddy’s tax audit is over. | 1.3306 | 0.05299 | 121 | 88 | 26 | 7 |
1391 | Rover gets treats but you have a really good college fund. | 1.3306 | 0.05553 | 121 | 90 | 22 | 9 |
1392 | I thought you needed a role model. | 1.3306 | 0.05299 | 121 | 88 | 26 | 7 |
1393 | Now be a good boy and tell Daddy where you hid Fido's boater. | 1.3306 | 0.05553 | 121 | 90 | 22 | 9 |
1394 | Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have. | 1.3306 | 0.05428 | 121 | 89 | 24 | 8 |
1395 | Oh Son, Daddy loves you both the same. | 1.3306 | 0.05553 | 121 | 90 | 22 | 9 |
1396 | Sorry. The suit was on sale, but it wasn't your size. | 1.3306 | 0.05168 | 121 | 87 | 28 | 6 |
1397 | We take turns. It's his turn to wear the suit today. | 1.3306 | 0.05168 | 121 | 87 | 28 | 6 |
1398 | He's easier to train, his sartorial style is excellent, and I won't have to pay for college | 1.3306 | 0.05553 | 121 | 90 | 22 | 9 |
1399 | Come on now, tell Otto how nice he looks in your old suit. | 1.3306 | 0.05299 | 121 | 88 | 26 | 7 |
1400 | Don’t be mad. I need the tax deduction. | 1.3306 | 0.05033 | 121 | 86 | 30 | 5 |
1401 | I know you wanted a sister, but this is your new brother Woof. | 1.3306 | 0.05553 | 121 | 90 | 22 | 9 |
1402 | Your grades were good, but Rex got a frisby scholarship | 1.3306 | 0.05676 | 121 | 91 | 20 | 10 |
1403 | Consider Teddy a role model, except in the greetings department... | 1.3306 | 0.05033 | 121 | 86 | 30 | 5 |
1404 | You are a big boy now and the suit doesn't fit you anymore. | 1.3306 | 0.05428 | 121 | 89 | 24 | 8 |
1405 | It's more fun to wear shoes like daddy does. | 1.3306 | 0.05168 | 121 | 87 | 28 | 6 |
1406 | Believe it or not, you are the one we adopted. | 1.3306 | 0.05676 | 121 | 91 | 20 | 10 |
1407 | Of course obedience school is for little boys as well. | 1.3306 | 0.05033 | 121 | 86 | 30 | 5 |
1408 | That's what can happen if you just leave your clothes in the closet. | 1.3306 | 0.05033 | 121 | 86 | 30 | 5 |
1409 | Well, Bobby, Beaufort is getting the inheritance because he was fully trained in 12 weeks. | 1.3306 | 0.05553 | 121 | 90 | 22 | 9 |
1410 | Son, we can’t recreate the ‘dogs playing poker’ painting with you in it, it just doesn’t work. | 1.3306 | 0.05676 | 121 | 91 | 20 | 10 |
1411 | Now, Johnny, who's a good boy? | 1.3306 | 0.05033 | 121 | 86 | 30 | 5 |
1412 | Timmy, I told you when I remarried it would be to my best friend. | 1.3306 | 0.05553 | 121 | 90 | 22 | 9 |
1413 | You’re both my favorite; he just looks cuter in the suit. | 1.3306 | 0.05299 | 121 | 88 | 26 | 7 |
1414 | He’s my handsome fur baby, and you’re just my son. | 1.3306 | 0.05428 | 121 | 89 | 24 | 8 |
1415 | Reginald is a well-heeled dog. | 1.3304 | 0.05200 | 115 | 82 | 28 | 5 |
1416 | I promise your new step mom will love you unconditionally | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1417 | Oh cheer up, he is better walking on two feet, he is a better dresser, and he is good looking, but, just give it time, he will run off after a car. | 1.3302 | 0.05482 | 106 | 76 | 25 | 5 |
1418 | Every minute you pout is seven dog minutes of his life. | 1.3302 | 0.05800 | 106 | 78 | 21 | 7 |
1419 | It's okay, Tommy, you can pee on the hydrant next time. | 1.3302 | 0.05643 | 106 | 77 | 23 | 6 |
1420 | You're going to Kindergarten but he's going to Phillips Academy. | 1.3302 | 0.05482 | 106 | 76 | 25 | 5 |
1421 | Come on - he already apologized for eating your homework | 1.3302 | 0.05643 | 106 | 77 | 23 | 6 |
1422 | Well, for one thing, he’s more obedient than you are!” | 1.3279 | 0.05514 | 122 | 91 | 22 | 9 |
1423 | well, maybe if you gained over 300,000 followers on any social media platform, i’d buy you new clothes too. | 1.3279 | 0.05263 | 122 | 89 | 26 | 7 |
1424 | I wanted a dog and you wanted a new mommy. It's called compromise, champ. | 1.3279 | 0.05263 | 122 | 89 | 26 | 7 |
1425 | Danny, you're absolutely right - it's definitely unfair that Spot is a sharp dresser, AND can lick his own nuts. | 1.3279 | 0.05390 | 122 | 90 | 24 | 8 |
1426 | Well, if you came when I called you'd get a treat too! | 1.3279 | 0.05636 | 122 | 92 | 20 | 10 |
1427 | I promise. Next time I'll take you to Home Depot. | 1.3279 | 0.05755 | 122 | 93 | 18 | 11 |
1428 | Come on, Charlie. It'll be fun having your new brother in the same school. | 1.3279 | 0.05636 | 122 | 92 | 20 | 10 |
1429 | Look how lucky you are! Your doggy's a minister!! | 1.3279 | 0.04861 | 122 | 91 | 24 | 7 |
1430 | But son, now we all get to stay home together! | 1.3279 | 0.05263 | 122 | 89 | 26 | 7 |
1431 | I know it doesn't seem fair, but in his defense, he was much easier to potty train. | 1.3279 | 0.05263 | 122 | 89 | 26 | 7 |
1432 | I don’t love him more than you, he’s just a better listener | 1.3279 | 0.05514 | 122 | 91 | 22 | 9 |
1433 | Once you stop sniffing butts I'll get you a suit, too! | 1.3279 | 0.05132 | 122 | 88 | 28 | 6 |
1434 | No, your brother is not a tattletale. I can also smell you need a diaper change. | 1.3277 | 0.05483 | 119 | 88 | 23 | 8 |
1435 | Don't tell me he ate your homework, your brother would never do that | 1.3277 | 0.04790 | 119 | 83 | 33 | 3 |
1436 | I love both of you equally, but Augustus is a good boy. | 1.3277 | 0.05737 | 119 | 90 | 19 | 10 |
1437 | His obedience school is really great. If they can do that with a dog, think about what they can do with you. | 1.3277 | 0.05352 | 119 | 87 | 25 | 7 |
1438 | Don’t take it personally, Billy, but Rex has been much more responsive to grooming than you. | 1.3277 | 0.05483 | 119 | 88 | 23 | 8 |
1439 | Just because he's borrowed your clothes doesn't mean you can now poop outside. | 1.3277 | 0.05612 | 119 | 89 | 21 | 9 |
1440 | Of course I don't have a favorite | 1.3277 | 0.05860 | 119 | 91 | 17 | 11 |
1441 | The event invitation said ‘dressy casual’, so quite frankly, you both look ridiculous. | 1.3277 | 0.05352 | 119 | 87 | 25 | 7 |
1442 | Steven, do you know how long it took to get the dog into this outfit? You're going to smile for the picture. | 1.3277 | 0.05217 | 119 | 86 | 27 | 6 |
1443 | Yes, the dog can wear people’s clothes, but that doesn’t mean you get to eat dog food. | 1.3277 | 0.05217 | 119 | 86 | 27 | 6 |
1444 | When you quit throwing tantrums over everything Donald, and show a little more respect to the family constitution like champ here, then we'll treat you the same. | 1.3277 | 0.05352 | 119 | 87 | 25 | 7 |
1445 | Sorry Eddie. You resemble Donald Trump so much that we are disowning you and choosing the dog to be our son from now on. | 1.3277 | 0.05612 | 119 | 89 | 21 | 9 |
1446 | I promise, you get to ride shotgun on the way home. | 1.3277 | 0.05352 | 119 | 87 | 25 | 7 |
1447 | If only your grandparents had been satisfied with a granddog! | 1.3277 | 0.05217 | 119 | 86 | 27 | 6 |
1448 | Learn from Rufus, son! He always holds hands and never runs ahead. | 1.3277 | 0.04790 | 119 | 87 | 25 | 6 |
1449 | Since it worked so well for Rover, obedience school will be good for you too. | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1450 | I know you're angry Norville, but the school won't allow a shaggy hairdoo. | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1451 | Look at the bright side—at least he's the one wearing a collar. | 1.3273 | 0.05020 | 110 | 77 | 30 | 3 |
1452 | One week in obedience school won't kill you. | 1.3273 | 0.05934 | 110 | 83 | 18 | 9 |
1453 | You crap on the carpet and don't do your homework, it makes you easy to replace." | 1.3273 | 0.05934 | 110 | 83 | 18 | 9 |
1454 | And the funny thing is, on Zoom they just think he's a kid with big ears. | 1.3271 | 0.05754 | 107 | 79 | 21 | 7 |
1455 | I’m sorry buddy. I know it can be scary when he talks while sniffing your butt. | 1.3271 | 0.06053 | 107 | 81 | 17 | 9 |
1456 | We've talked about this, mommy and I thought a puppy would be good practice for a real baby, and we were right! So try to be like your brother, he's suchagoodboy! | 1.3271 | 0.05017 | 107 | 82 | 18 | 7 |
1457 | One more TikTok of you two dancing and then we get ice cream! | 1.3269 | 0.05707 | 104 | 76 | 22 | 6 |
1458 | When you get straight A's at school like Sparky, you can be Daddy's favorite. | 1.3256 | 0.05297 | 129 | 96 | 24 | 9 |
1459 | It's not fair. Spot poops in the yard and he gets a treat. I poop in the yard and I get put on time out. | 1.3252 | 0.04965 | 123 | 88 | 30 | 5 |
1460 | Look, you said you wanted a little brother, and this is the best your mommy and I can do. | 1.3252 | 0.05097 | 123 | 89 | 28 | 6 |
1461 | But Harry, this is SOOOO much better than having a little brother. You don't have to share your toys! | 1.3252 | 0.05596 | 123 | 93 | 20 | 10 |
1462 | Tommy, this is Paco, the headmaster at the obedience school mommy and I are sending you to. | 1.3252 | 0.05714 | 123 | 94 | 18 | 11 |
1463 | That was the deal...when Muffy learns to walk standing up you'll learn to heal. | 1.3252 | 0.05596 | 123 | 92 | 20 | 10 |
1464 | Mommy always wanted a baby, daddy always wanted a dog. | 1.3252 | 0.05227 | 123 | 90 | 26 | 7 |
1465 | Hey, when you go to private school, you’ll get to wear short pants too | 1.3252 | 0.05353 | 123 | 91 | 24 | 8 |
1466 | Max used his listening ears and that’s why he got a treat...he’s a good boy, isn’t he? | 1.3252 | 0.05353 | 123 | 91 | 24 | 8 |
1467 | You see? He DOES like the clothes he got for XMAS | 1.3250 | 0.05444 | 120 | 89 | 23 | 8 |
1468 | Do you want to get neutered, too? | 1.3250 | 0.05044 | 120 | 86 | 29 | 5 |
1469 | Why can't you be a good boy like your little brother, Rover? | 1.3250 | 0.05571 | 120 | 90 | 21 | 9 |
1470 | Ok Timmy, you don’t want to go back in the crate do you? | 1.3250 | 0.05571 | 120 | 90 | 21 | 9 |
1471 | Come on, let’s take your brother for a walk. | 1.3250 | 0.05571 | 120 | 90 | 21 | 9 |
1472 | Come on, it's time to make up. Shake? | 1.3250 | 0.04903 | 120 | 85 | 31 | 4 |
1473 | He got the treat because he came when I called. | 1.3250 | 0.05044 | 120 | 86 | 29 | 5 |
1474 | Until you can sit quietly like him, Billy, your adopted brother is getting all the treats. | 1.3250 | 0.05314 | 120 | 88 | 25 | 7 |
1475 | Just because he’s adopted doesn’t mean he’s not your brother | 1.3250 | 0.05314 | 120 | 88 | 25 | 7 |
1476 | Sorry Timmy—best-in-show’s don’t fetch anymore. | 1.3250 | 0.05314 | 120 | 88 | 25 | 7 |
1477 | Son, he’s in our pod so let’s find a way to get along | 1.3250 | 0.05314 | 120 | 88 | 25 | 7 |
1478 | But he's 'Man's Best Friend.' You' re just my son." | 1.3250 | 0.05444 | 120 | 89 | 23 | 8 |
1479 | You ARE still my favourite, Joey. Just not in an unconditional love kind of way, more in a condition of my child support agreement kind of way. | 1.3250 | 0.05696 | 120 | 91 | 19 | 10 |
1480 | Take turns, next time we will go to your park. | 1.3250 | 0.05314 | 120 | 88 | 25 | 7 |
1481 | oh donald, be a good boy! | 1.3250 | 0.05314 | 120 | 88 | 25 | 7 |
1482 | ‘Now give him your paw and apologize.” | 1.3250 | 0.04903 | 120 | 85 | 31 | 4 |
1483 | I’m sorry but your playgroup doesn’t do business casual | 1.3250 | 0.05044 | 120 | 86 | 29 | 5 |
1484 | When he goes off to college, you can have his kennel. | 1.3250 | 0.05571 | 120 | 90 | 21 | 9 |
1485 | - I got you a hot dog just like you asked! | 1.3250 | 0.05314 | 120 | 88 | 25 | 7 |
1486 | It’s not that I ‘love him more,’ it’s that he obeys when I say ‘quiet.’ | 1.3250 | 0.05044 | 120 | 86 | 29 | 5 |
1487 | We need another stimulus check, Timmy | 1.3250 | 0.05181 | 120 | 87 | 27 | 6 |
1488 | You’re not identical twins, just fraternal! | 1.3250 | 0.04903 | 120 | 85 | 31 | 4 |
1489 | I’m sorry, son, but you heard your mother. You just don’t spark joy anymore. | 1.3250 | 0.05571 | 120 | 90 | 21 | 9 |
1490 | You're going to have to hold it, because I forgot to bring a plastic bag. | 1.3248 | 0.05268 | 117 | 85 | 26 | 6 |
1491 | Sorry Timmy, not all of us can be an Instagram influence | 1.3248 | 0.05672 | 117 | 88 | 20 | 9 |
1492 | You're still my 'oldest' child. | 1.3243 | 0.05302 | 111 | 80 | 26 | 5 |
1493 | We can fetch the ball together! | 1.3243 | 0.05602 | 111 | 82 | 22 | 7 |
1494 | I want to pee on the plants too! | 1.3243 | 0.05454 | 111 | 81 | 24 | 6 |
1495 | Don't be angry, look at your brother, he never complains. | 1.3243 | 0.05602 | 111 | 82 | 22 | 7 |
1496 | Last week we went to the skatepark, this week it’s the dog park | 1.3243 | 0.05747 | 111 | 83 | 19 | 8 |
1497 | Don't call your stepmother a bitch. | 1.3241 | 0.05858 | 108 | 81 | 19 | 8 |
1498 | Two walks a day, that's what we do. | 1.3241 | 0.05858 | 108 | 81 | 19 | 8 |
1499 | Hey, Buddy...It was Mommy's idea. | 1.3241 | 0.05234 | 108 | 77 | 27 | 4 |
1500 | This is what happens when you don't behave, son - we turn you into a dog. | 1.3241 | 0.05858 | 108 | 81 | 19 | 8 |
1501 | Okay, okay. I'll buy you a leash too. | 1.3238 | 0.05820 | 105 | 78 | 20 | 7 |
1502 | Remember, Billy: animals are people too. | 1.3231 | 0.06971 | 65 | 47 | 15 | 3 |
1503 | When you grow up, you two will be best friends. | 1.3231 | 0.06971 | 65 | 47 | 15 | 3 |
1504 | It's true he doesn't go fetch, but he plays a mean game of badminton. | 1.3226 | 0.04932 | 124 | 89 | 30 | 5 |
1505 | Turn that frown into a smile and I'll throw you a bone. | 1.3226 | 0.05557 | 124 | 94 | 20 | 10 |
1506 | Come on! It's for the New Yorker's Caption Contest! | 1.3223 | 0.05532 | 121 | 91 | 21 | 9 |
1507 | There is no "bone of contention" as to who the real pet is here. | 1.3223 | 0.05277 | 121 | 89 | 25 | 7 |
1508 | Billy, you’re my boy! It’s just Buddy is a man's best friend. | 1.3223 | 0.05009 | 121 | 87 | 29 | 5 |
1509 | He got your paw-me-downs. | 1.3223 | 0.05277 | 121 | 89 | 25 | 7 |
1510 | Don't be so bigoted! | 1.3223 | 0.05406 | 121 | 90 | 23 | 8 |
1511 | Timmy, I want you to say your sorry to Rover for hiding his frisbee. | 1.3223 | 0.05277 | 121 | 89 | 25 | 7 |
1512 | C'mon...Rover loved obedience school and so can you. | 1.3223 | 0.04653 | 121 | 87 | 30 | 4 |
1513 | I am NOT wearing a uniform. It's HOME school! | 1.3223 | 0.05277 | 121 | 89 | 25 | 7 |
1514 | Pretend you're meeting a new kid at the playground. | 1.3223 | 0.05406 | 121 | 90 | 23 | 8 |
1515 | He says he’s sorry he bit you. Can you say you’re sorry you put him on a chain? | 1.3223 | 0.05406 | 121 | 90 | 23 | 8 |
1516 | Yes Bobby....but she is a WELL DRESSED bitch... | 1.3223 | 0.05406 | 121 | 90 | 23 | 8 |
1517 | He’s younger so you won’t have to wear his hand-me-downs. | 1.3223 | 0.05532 | 121 | 91 | 21 | 9 |
1518 | Of course I love you more than Rover. He just dresses better than you do | 1.3223 | 0.04869 | 121 | 86 | 31 | 4 |
1519 | But we need to claim him for the stimulus. | 1.3223 | 0.05406 | 121 | 90 | 23 | 8 |
1520 | A top-tier preschool might take you, too--if you were brothers. | 1.3223 | 0.05009 | 121 | 87 | 29 | 5 |
1521 | You're adopted too | 1.3223 | 0.05532 | 121 | 91 | 21 | 9 |
1522 | Remember, son, we greet friends with our hands not our noses. | 1.3223 | 0.05009 | 121 | 87 | 29 | 5 |
1523 | Good boys are back in style. | 1.3223 | 0.05406 | 121 | 90 | 23 | 8 |
1524 | You’ll love obedience school, Otto had a great time. | 1.3223 | 0.05009 | 121 | 87 | 29 | 5 |
1525 | He's not a puppy anymore; technically he's your big brother. | 1.3223 | 0.05406 | 121 | 90 | 23 | 8 |
1526 | Okay, who's the good boy now? | 1.3223 | 0.05145 | 121 | 88 | 27 | 6 |
1527 | Sorry, but spot aced obedience school. | 1.3223 | 0.05145 | 121 | 88 | 27 | 6 |
1528 | Sorry Tommie, but his school Is open | 1.3223 | 0.05406 | 121 | 90 | 23 | 8 |
1529 | You are a good boy too! Good Boy! | 1.3223 | 0.05009 | 121 | 87 | 29 | 5 |
1530 | Maybe you should go to obedience school, too! | 1.3223 | 0.05145 | 121 | 88 | 27 | 6 |
1531 | Just try and be a good boy, like this son of a bitch. | 1.3223 | 0.05775 | 121 | 93 | 17 | 11 |
1532 | You're still my favorite human member of the family. | 1.3223 | 0.04726 | 121 | 85 | 33 | 3 |
1533 | No son, I don’t think our border collie is smarter than you. | 1.3223 | 0.05655 | 121 | 92 | 19 | 10 |
1534 | Yeah, it was a bad year, but for Spot it was seven. | 1.3223 | 0.04869 | 121 | 86 | 31 | 4 |
1535 | She doesn't do tricks but she does do taxes. | 1.3223 | 0.05406 | 121 | 90 | 23 | 8 |
1536 | Sorry bud, not everyone gets into private school. | 1.3223 | 0.05009 | 121 | 87 | 29 | 5 |
1537 | Treats are just for good boys | 1.3223 | 0.05145 | 121 | 88 | 27 | 6 |
1538 | If you don’t want to wear a mask, this is your playdate. | 1.3223 | 0.05406 | 121 | 90 | 23 | 8 |
1539 | it’s not you, i just like the dog better. | 1.3223 | 0.05775 | 121 | 93 | 17 | 11 |
1540 | I’m sorry my Tik Tok with him got more views. We’ll try again tomorrow | 1.3223 | 0.05145 | 121 | 88 | 27 | 6 |
1541 | Remember, we got your brother so you could have a good role model. | 1.3223 | 0.05655 | 121 | 92 | 19 | 10 |
1542 | Listen sport, you’re both good boys. | 1.3223 | 0.05277 | 121 | 89 | 25 | 7 |
1543 | You were the one who wanted a dog | 1.3223 | 0.05277 | 121 | 89 | 25 | 7 |
1544 | I know you wanted to do legos, Ethan, but isn't it fair we did fetch today? | 1.3220 | 0.04945 | 118 | 84 | 30 | 4 |
1545 | I'm sorry, he had a better performance review. | 1.3220 | 0.05230 | 118 | 86 | 26 | 6 |
1546 | Let's be honest here. Who really is the good boy? | 1.3220 | 0.05090 | 118 | 85 | 28 | 5 |
1547 | We had to cut a hole in your pants for his tail. | 1.3220 | 0.05230 | 118 | 86 | 26 | 6 |
1548 | Don't worry. You're already too big for his hand-me-downs. | 1.3220 | 0.05090 | 118 | 85 | 28 | 5 |
1549 | Why can’t you be as obedient as Rex? | 1.3220 | 0.05367 | 118 | 87 | 24 | 7 |
1550 | I know it might not seem fair that I got him a cellphone, but he is thirty-five. | 1.3220 | 0.05630 | 118 | 89 | 20 | 9 |
1551 | Quit complaining - he won fair and square. Your obedience skills are deplorable. | 1.3220 | 0.05090 | 118 | 85 | 28 | 5 |
1552 | But I already told you,we can only afford one son! | 1.3220 | 0.05500 | 118 | 88 | 22 | 8 |
1553 | How about I let you sleep in his room? | 1.3220 | 0.05090 | 118 | 85 | 28 | 5 |
1554 | Well,honey,Rufus knows where to poop. | 1.3220 | 0.05090 | 118 | 85 | 28 | 5 |
1555 | Cmon, it'll be just like Stuart Little! | 1.3220 | 0.05500 | 118 | 88 | 22 | 8 |
1556 | He can be your best friend too. | 1.3220 | 0.04945 | 118 | 84 | 30 | 4 |
1557 | Donald, if you’re as good as Clifford when you get older you can have some of daddy’s companies. | 1.3220 | 0.05090 | 118 | 85 | 28 | 5 |
1558 | If you two don’t behave, I’ll have to put you down. | 1.3220 | 0.05367 | 118 | 87 | 24 | 7 |
1559 | pampered pets vs entitled brats | 1.3217 | 0.05599 | 115 | 86 | 21 | 8 |
1560 | Honestly, Timmy? You weren't meeting my needs. | 1.3217 | 0.05319 | 115 | 84 | 25 | 6 |
1561 | OK, OK. I promise we won't walk near the playground. | 1.3217 | 0.05319 | 115 | 84 | 25 | 6 |
1562 | I'm sure he feels bad for chewing up your ball glove. | 1.3217 | 0.05461 | 115 | 85 | 23 | 7 |
1563 | Please behave Jimmy, I only brought one leash. | 1.3217 | 0.05024 | 115 | 82 | 29 | 4 |
1564 | His pant legs are not too short when he's on all fours. | 1.3217 | 0.04711 | 115 | 80 | 33 | 2 |
1565 | Every dog has his day. You’ll get yours too Billy. | 1.3217 | 0.05319 | 115 | 84 | 25 | 6 |
1566 | It’s either this or Zoom.” | 1.3217 | 0.05461 | 115 | 85 | 23 | 7 |
1567 | We can’t afford to send both of you off to college | 1.3217 | 0.05461 | 115 | 85 | 23 | 7 |
1568 | What's your problem, son? You've outgrown that suit anyway. | 1.3211 | 0.05355 | 109 | 79 | 25 | 5 |
1569 | Look Buddy- he scored way higher in the prep. school exams | 1.3211 | 0.05812 | 109 | 82 | 19 | 8 |
1570 | If you really want to be a Therapy Boy, you’ll have to study hard like Fritz. | 1.3211 | 0.05664 | 109 | 81 | 21 | 7 |
1571 | If you learned to use the bathroom properly like your brother, you'd also get 20 minutes of playtime | 1.3211 | 0.05355 | 109 | 79 | 25 | 5 |
1572 | You know that suit doesn’t fit you anymore | 1.3211 | 0.05194 | 109 | 78 | 27 | 4 |
1573 | I will enroll you in the obedience school next. | 1.3193 | 0.05054 | 119 | 86 | 28 | 5 |
1574 | You yourself said, "4 legs good, 2 legs better.", so why are you so mad young Orwell? | 1.3193 | 0.05328 | 119 | 88 | 24 | 7 |
1575 | He just came back from church, you don't need to be jealous. | 1.3193 | 0.05328 | 119 | 88 | 24 | 7 |
1576 | When your mom called your stepmother that, I thought it was a figure of speech. | 1.3193 | 0.05589 | 119 | 90 | 20 | 9 |
1577 | What makes you think we're bad at hiding your Christmas present? | 1.3193 | 0.05193 | 119 | 87 | 26 | 6 |
1578 | You'll always be my boy; he's just my best friend | 1.3193 | 0.05460 | 119 | 89 | 22 | 8 |
1579 | No, he goes to doggie daycare, you go to a different one. | 1.3193 | 0.05328 | 119 | 88 | 24 | 7 |
1580 | He's just my best friend..You are my son.. | 1.3193 | 0.05589 | 119 | 90 | 20 | 9 |
1581 | Yes, all the people schools are closed, but we found an opening for the both of you in the very next best thing. | 1.3193 | 0.05193 | 119 | 87 | 26 | 6 |
1582 | But Junior, Little Blue Boy mastered his toilet training 3 years ago. | 1.3193 | 0.05460 | 119 | 89 | 22 | 8 |
1583 | Yes, you are. You are. You are a good boy, too." | 1.3193 | 0.04838 | 119 | 87 | 27 | 5 |
1584 | C’mon: Who’s a Good Boy?!! | 1.3193 | 0.05589 | 119 | 90 | 20 | 9 |
1585 | It's not that we have favorites Billy, Fido just looks shit-hot in black. | 1.3193 | 0.05328 | 119 | 88 | 24 | 7 |
1586 | Now Billy, there’s no need to be angry. I’ve already explained to Rusty that a suit does not make a man.” | 1.3193 | 0.05589 | 119 | 90 | 20 | 9 |
1587 | Now, listen up young man. Some dogs play fetch. And some dogs study for the priesthood. Alright?" | 1.3193 | 0.05193 | 119 | 87 | 26 | 6 |
1588 | Look at the bright side - now YOU get to poop on the street. | 1.3193 | 0.05460 | 119 | 89 | 22 | 8 |
1589 | Well he may not look EXACTLY like you, but he IS your Brother" | 1.3193 | 0.05715 | 119 | 91 | 18 | 10 |
1590 | Come come Timmy, don't be jealous. You know puppy school is private. Besides, dogs don't do well with distance learning. | 1.3193 | 0.05589 | 119 | 90 | 20 | 9 |
1591 | Behave, or I'll turn you into a dog, just like your little brother. | 1.3193 | 0.05589 | 119 | 90 | 20 | 9 |
1592 | Just because we say he's a "good boy" or you wear his hand-me-downs doesn't mean we love you any less. | 1.3193 | 0.05193 | 119 | 87 | 26 | 6 |
1593 | They are not dangerous if you raise them right..and neither are the dogs. | 1.3193 | 0.05328 | 119 | 88 | 24 | 7 |
1594 | It's his birthday, Tommy. That's why he's wearing them. | 1.3193 | 0.05054 | 119 | 86 | 28 | 5 |
1595 | If you hadn't been held back a year in obedience school, I would have bought you a new outfit too. | 1.3193 | 0.05054 | 119 | 86 | 28 | 5 |
1596 | No reason to mope. You're my son, but he's only my best friend! | 1.3193 | 0.04764 | 119 | 84 | 32 | 3 |
1597 | You need to apologize to your brother and tell him he looks good in his new suit. | 1.3193 | 0.05460 | 119 | 89 | 22 | 8 |
1598 | Be nice to your brother and you'll get a treat. | 1.3193 | 0.05328 | 119 | 88 | 24 | 7 |
1599 | Billy, you apologize to Sparky right now for calling him a "son of a bitch"! | 1.3193 | 0.05054 | 119 | 86 | 28 | 5 |
1600 | Maybe I'd love you if you were more like Jeffrey. | 1.3193 | 0.05328 | 119 | 88 | 24 | 7 |
1601 | Don't worry about it. No one will ever guess he's your cousin. | 1.3193 | 0.05193 | 119 | 87 | 26 | 6 |
1602 | Now who else is a Good Boy! | 1.3193 | 0.05193 | 119 | 87 | 26 | 6 |
1603 | Who's a good boy? Are you a good boy? | 1.3193 | 0.05054 | 119 | 86 | 28 | 5 |
1604 | I feed you. I walk you. I clean up after you. Why can't you love me unreservedly? | 1.3193 | 0.05715 | 119 | 91 | 18 | 10 |
1605 | He reads at a fourth grade level. | 1.3193 | 0.05054 | 119 | 86 | 28 | 5 |
1606 | Look, I know your stepmother is a bitch , but you still have to get along with your new brother. | 1.3193 | 0.05193 | 119 | 87 | 26 | 6 |
1607 | He threw your ball. Now go fetch it. | 1.3193 | 0.05193 | 119 | 87 | 26 | 6 |
1608 | Whats wrong? You asked for a puppy and a baby brother for Christmas, and Amazon had a two-for-one deal. | 1.3193 | 0.05715 | 119 | 91 | 18 | 10 |
1609 | Remember how crazy people get from isolating too long, now shake your brother’s hand and play outside | 1.3193 | 0.04911 | 119 | 85 | 30 | 4 |
1610 | I guess I only have one very good boy? | 1.3193 | 0.04911 | 119 | 85 | 30 | 4 |
1611 | I’m sorry Timmy, you simply do not have the pedigree for Saint Cuthberts. | 1.3193 | 0.05715 | 119 | 91 | 18 | 10 |
1612 | What do you mean it is not the potty training you were expecting?! | 1.3193 | 0.05054 | 119 | 86 | 28 | 5 |
1613 | No, only he may take a dump on the streets! | 1.3193 | 0.04911 | 119 | 85 | 30 | 4 |
1614 | I, for one, welcome our new canine overlords, and you should, too! | 1.3190 | 0.05281 | 116 | 85 | 25 | 6 |
1615 | Relax, Timmy. You said you wanted a well groomed dog. | 1.3190 | 0.05557 | 116 | 87 | 21 | 8 |
1616 | Don't sulk Son, you know Tuesday is his day for identying as human | 1.3190 | 0.05948 | 116 | 90 | 15 | 11 |
1617 | ‘I’m happy with the vaccine side-effects if you are.’ | 1.3190 | 0.05421 | 116 | 86 | 23 | 7 |
1618 | Now, Jimmy, Rex didn’t mean anything against you when he said ‘all dogs go to Heaven’ | 1.3186 | 0.05518 | 113 | 84 | 22 | 7 |
1619 | Won’t it be fun to wear matching outfits? | 1.3182 | 0.05766 | 110 | 83 | 19 | 8 |
1620 | See Donald? Freddy acts like a well-behaved, decent human, so I'm sure you can learn how. This is the first step to being a great man someday, even U.S. President! But first you have to stop snarling, biting, and going potty wherever you want. | 1.3182 | 0.05469 | 110 | 81 | 23 | 6 |
1621 | this is our sunday walkie, no biting or fighting with anyone | 1.3178 | 0.05727 | 107 | 80 | 20 | 7 |
1622 | Now remember, Johnny, we got you the Lord of Yorkshire only after you agreed to take him for a walk every day. | 1.3178 | 0.05727 | 107 | 80 | 20 | 7 |
1623 | One day, when you have kids, you’ll understand. | 1.3178 | 0.05245 | 107 | 77 | 26 | 4 |
1624 | I know. But, your mom was a ‘dog mom’ before I even met her... | 1.3178 | 0.05727 | 107 | 80 | 20 | 7 |
1625 | You can take the entrance exam again next year, but until then you need to go to public school. | 1.3178 | 0.05410 | 107 | 78 | 24 | 5 |
1626 | OK. Let's play Supreme Court. Muffy here will be Ruth Bader Ginsburg and you're a natural to be Brett Cavanagh! | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1627 | I know Kibbles 'n' Bits aren't your favorite. But Siegfried is your guest and he gets to choose. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1628 | There are two toilets in this house and he didn’t drink from yours! | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1629 | Billy, don't be angry. That's just Barky's way of saying hello! | 1.3167 | 0.05549 | 120 | 91 | 20 | 9 |
1630 | Little brothers get hand-me-downs. You just have to wait until he outgrows it. | 1.3167 | 0.05549 | 120 | 91 | 20 | 9 |
1631 | Now,remember to turn around three times before you sit down. | 1.3162 | 0.05242 | 117 | 86 | 25 | 6 |
1632 | I'm sorry Jeffrey, but only Bauzer can relieve himself on the fire hydrant! | 1.3162 | 0.05381 | 117 | 87 | 23 | 7 |
1633 | I know, honey. But HE’S house broken. | 1.3162 | 0.05242 | 117 | 86 | 25 | 6 |
1634 | Look son every dog has his day....and Spot’s is today | 1.3162 | 0.05242 | 117 | 86 | 25 | 6 |
1635 | Ok Timmy, now it's your turn to roll over. | 1.3162 | 0.04953 | 117 | 84 | 29 | 4 |
1636 | He can be your pet AND my best friend! | 1.3158 | 0.05333 | 114 | 84 | 24 | 6 |
1637 | Don't be angry. He'll just wear your suit today because it's his birthday! | 1.3158 | 0.05616 | 114 | 86 | 20 | 8 |
1638 | This is only temporary until we receive the stimulus check. | 1.3158 | 0.05476 | 114 | 85 | 22 | 7 |
1639 | Get used to it, son. It’s a dog eat boy world out there. | 1.3158 | 0.05333 | 114 | 84 | 24 | 6 |
1640 | Mom says when we learn neatness we can dress up like Prince. | 1.3158 | 0.05333 | 114 | 84 | 24 | 6 |
1641 | Why does he always get to be Little Lord Fauntleroy? | 1.3158 | 0.05333 | 114 | 84 | 24 | 6 |
1642 | Come on! Who’s a good boy? Who’s a guh-boy | 1.3158 | 0.05185 | 114 | 83 | 26 | 5 |
1643 | Don't worry, if the trial adoption doesn't work out, we'll send you back. | 1.3158 | 0.05476 | 114 | 85 | 22 | 7 |
1644 | When you grow up, maybe you'll be my best friend. | 1.3158 | 0.05185 | 114 | 83 | 26 | 5 |
1645 | I've always said "it's clothes and attitude which make the man". | 1.3158 | 0.05476 | 114 | 85 | 22 | 7 |
1646 | C'mon, buddy, you outgrew it. We'll get you a new one. | 1.3158 | 0.04876 | 114 | 81 | 30 | 3 |
1647 | He’s actually a Boarding School Collie. | 1.3158 | 0.05185 | 114 | 83 | 26 | 5 |
1648 | Son, just because I always say, "Good dog," doesn't mean I love him more than you. | 1.3158 | 0.05753 | 114 | 87 | 18 | 9 |
1649 | When you improve your grades, you'll get to wear a uniform too. | 1.3158 | 0.04714 | 114 | 80 | 32 | 2 |
1650 | Because he’s the oldest. You can have his hand-me-downs when he’s through with them. | 1.3158 | 0.05616 | 114 | 86 | 20 | 8 |
1651 | Sure he's better dressed, but he'll never wear shoes. | 1.3158 | 0.04955 | 114 | 89 | 17 | 8 |
1652 | Sparky would like to teach you some new tricks! | 1.3158 | 0.05333 | 114 | 84 | 24 | 6 |
1653 | Now YOU show HIM how to act like a dog. | 1.3158 | 0.05185 | 114 | 83 | 26 | 5 |
1654 | Donald, we agreed fair and square that it is Joe's turn to wear the suit | 1.3158 | 0.05333 | 114 | 84 | 24 | 6 |
1655 | Your little brother just took the vaccine, ain't you excited? | 1.3158 | 0.05753 | 114 | 87 | 18 | 9 |
1656 | Don’t be ridiculous, I love you both the same. | 1.3158 | 0.05333 | 114 | 84 | 24 | 6 |
1657 | Don't you want to wish Buddy a good day at school? | 1.3153 | 0.05576 | 111 | 83 | 21 | 7 |
1658 | Johnny, how would you like to go to Fido's obedience school? | 1.3153 | 0.05274 | 111 | 81 | 25 | 5 |
1659 | But,Timmy,he won't be an obnoxious teenager in a few years | 1.3153 | 0.05427 | 111 | 82 | 23 | 6 |
1660 | Your mommy got her tubes tied and daddy had a vasectomy so this is the best we could do, Timmy | 1.3143 | 0.05631 | 105 | 78 | 21 | 6 |
1661 | Scruffy is not judging you for having absolutely no sense of style. | 1.3143 | 0.05948 | 105 | 80 | 17 | 8 |
1662 | You’re right, he doesn’t look anything like us. We should have sniffed his butt a little more closely before we brought him home. | 1.3143 | 0.05792 | 105 | 79 | 19 | 7 |
1663 | Ok, Jimmy, next time, you get the fire hydrant & Freddie takes the tree. | 1.3143 | 0.05466 | 105 | 77 | 23 | 5 |
1664 | You've always dressed like daddy. Now mommy has someone to dress like her. | 1.3137 | 0.05210 | 102 | 73 | 26 | 3 |
1665 | Come on, just for a little while, he looks silly without sneakers. | 1.3137 | 0.05210 | 102 | 73 | 26 | 3 |
1666 | You wanted a brother and a dog. It's like we got you both! | 1.3136 | 0.05476 | 118 | 89 | 21 | 8 |
1667 | Yes, he's a good boy but you're MY boy. | 1.3136 | 0.05607 | 118 | 90 | 19 | 9 |
1668 | And someday...I'll take you to obedience school. | 1.3136 | 0.05064 | 118 | 86 | 27 | 5 |
1669 | You said you wanted a little brother... | 1.3136 | 0.05064 | 118 | 86 | 27 | 5 |
1670 | You can wear the suit tomorrow... | 1.3136 | 0.05342 | 118 | 88 | 23 | 7 |
1671 | I’m not happy to be your father, either. | 1.3136 | 0.05064 | 118 | 86 | 27 | 5 |
1672 | It was just a form of greeting. | 1.3136 | 0.05205 | 118 | 87 | 25 | 6 |
1673 | Come on, son. You always said you wanted a dog, and a little brother. Now you have both! | 1.3136 | 0.05205 | 118 | 87 | 25 | 6 |
1674 | Now you be a good boy and I’ll get you a treat too. | 1.3136 | 0.05064 | 118 | 86 | 27 | 5 |
1675 | Maybe you’re MOMMY’S best friend! | 1.3136 | 0.05476 | 118 | 89 | 21 | 8 |
1676 | If the teacher asks,just say “He’s my brother” | 1.3136 | 0.05064 | 118 | 86 | 27 | 5 |
1677 | We've been over this, Tyler. You're three and Bosco's twenty-one. He gets to go to work and you don't. But look on the bright side: he'll be dead LONG before you are. | 1.3136 | 0.05607 | 118 | 90 | 19 | 9 |
1678 | Now, now, I love both my children equally. | 1.3136 | 0.05342 | 118 | 88 | 23 | 7 |
1679 | Now let's see your good boy face. | 1.3136 | 0.04615 | 118 | 83 | 33 | 2 |
1680 | But you could be a good boy too! | 1.3136 | 0.05205 | 118 | 87 | 25 | 6 |
1681 | Don’t feel badly son. You can be my second best friend . | 1.3136 | 0.05064 | 118 | 86 | 27 | 5 |
1682 | I'll teach you how to shake hands when you're older. | 1.3136 | 0.05342 | 118 | 88 | 23 | 7 |
1683 | You come the next time I call - and you'll get a treat too. | 1.3136 | 0.05342 | 118 | 88 | 23 | 7 |
1684 | We’ve already talked about this, only your brother is allowed to pee outside. | 1.3136 | 0.05342 | 118 | 88 | 23 | 7 |
1685 | Once you learn to heel, you can wear the suit. | 1.3136 | 0.04918 | 118 | 85 | 29 | 4 |
1686 | He’s a good boy, so he gets the treat | 1.3136 | 0.05342 | 118 | 88 | 23 | 7 |
1687 | Okay, next time we’ll neuter him and you can wear the suit” | 1.3136 | 0.05607 | 118 | 90 | 19 | 9 |
1688 | Think of the possibilities --- Pilgrim charts his pedigree to before the Mayflower." | 1.3130 | 0.05293 | 115 | 85 | 24 | 6 |
1689 | Yes he has better clothes..but his mother is a pedigree | 1.3130 | 0.04997 | 115 | 83 | 28 | 4 |
1690 | I told you, tell us where you buried his bone or no TV for a month! | 1.3130 | 0.05574 | 115 | 87 | 20 | 8 |
1691 | Honey, we’ll get you a suit too, after 6 years when you grow as old as him! | 1.3130 | 0.05435 | 115 | 86 | 22 | 7 |
1692 | And now let's see if we can't teach a young boy old tricks. | 1.3125 | 0.05078 | 112 | 81 | 27 | 4 |
1693 | “Johnny, sure Conrad knows his times-tables and capitals of states, but no one can roll over and play dead like you.” | 1.3125 | 0.05078 | 112 | 81 | 27 | 4 |
1694 | Can't you see? Obedience school will do wonders for you. | 1.3125 | 0.05078 | 112 | 81 | 27 | 4 |
1695 | I know he’s not Scooby Doo, son, but at least he doesn’t live in a van. | 1.3125 | 0.05078 | 112 | 81 | 27 | 4 |
1696 | Come on... Remember how you said you looked like a sissy in short pants...??? | 1.3125 | 0.05817 | 112 | 86 | 17 | 9 |
1697 | Billy, he may be more cuddly, but bottom line is you are both sons of bitches. | 1.3125 | 0.05533 | 112 | 84 | 21 | 7 |
1698 | I suspect your mother was promiscuous, but let's not jump to conclusions. | 1.3125 | 0.05953 | 112 | 87 | 15 | 10 |
1699 | He was more loyal to our family so we had to shift the estate to him. | 1.3125 | 0.04751 | 112 | 79 | 31 | 2 |
1700 | He insisted on formal wear to meet you for the first time. Usually, he runs around naked | 1.3125 | 0.05078 | 112 | 81 | 27 | 4 |
1701 | I'm sorry, he turned out to be the goodest boy in the whole wide world. You had your chance. | 1.3125 | 0.05078 | 112 | 81 | 27 | 4 |
1702 | C'mere Timmy, Father McGonicle is here to take your first confession. | 1.3125 | 0.05078 | 112 | 81 | 27 | 4 |
1703 | It's hard to find the perfect babysitter. | 1.3125 | 0.05817 | 112 | 86 | 17 | 9 |
1704 | Grandma worked very hard to make you that suit. | 1.3125 | 0.05234 | 112 | 82 | 25 | 5 |
1705 | Don't be mad Donnie. He is not a fake dog and your hands will always be bigger than his. . | 1.3125 | 0.05533 | 112 | 84 | 21 | 7 |
1706 | Well, Michelle thinks of him like a son. | 1.3125 | 0.05677 | 112 | 85 | 19 | 8 |
1707 | Sorry son, take-your-kid-to-work-day is a little different this year | 1.3125 | 0.05078 | 112 | 81 | 27 | 4 |
1708 | Alright, alright. Pomeroy says its fine if you come with us on our walk. Just stay right with us and don't run off. Otherwise, I'll put the leash on you. | 1.3119 | 0.05785 | 109 | 83 | 18 | 8 |
1709 | Don’t worry Tommy, we’ll get you a new suit with the new stimulus check | 1.3119 | 0.06071 | 109 | 85 | 14 | 10 |
1710 | I’m sorry son, this is the way things work now with shelters. We’re the ones on trial! | 1.3119 | 0.05326 | 109 | 80 | 24 | 5 |
1711 | No! I am the good boy!!! | 1.3119 | 0.05636 | 109 | 82 | 20 | 7 |
1712 | His mother’s the bitch. Which makes you the bastard. | 1.3119 | 0.05930 | 109 | 84 | 16 | 9 |
1713 | He’s just like you, only friendlier. | 1.3119 | 0.05636 | 109 | 82 | 20 | 7 |
1714 | it's your turn to fetch | 1.3113 | 0.05080 | 106 | 76 | 27 | 3 |
1715 | Don’t force me to send you to obedience school. | 1.3103 | 0.06185 | 87 | 65 | 17 | 5 |
1716 | Just go find a tree somewhere | 1.3103 | 0.05110 | 116 | 85 | 26 | 5 |
1717 | Come on,Tommy! it’s Barksley’s birthday,and if he wants to go sniffing butts, then that’s what we’re gonna’ do! | 1.3103 | 0.05395 | 116 | 87 | 22 | 7 |
1718 | Buddy's just filling in until we can get a new monkey | 1.3103 | 0.05797 | 116 | 90 | 16 | 10 |
1719 | Now it is your turn to go to obedience school. | 1.3103 | 0.04807 | 116 | 83 | 30 | 3 |
1720 | His pedigree is higher. | 1.3103 | 0.05110 | 116 | 85 | 26 | 5 |
1721 | I’m sorry doggy daycares opened before elementary schools, but you should be happy SOMEONE gets to get back to their routine! | 1.3103 | 0.05110 | 116 | 85 | 26 | 5 |
1722 | You’ll be fine, Timmy. I’ve already taken your stuff to the orphanage. | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
1723 | Listen, this dance isn’t going to TikTok itself. | 1.3097 | 0.05345 | 113 | 84 | 23 | 6 |
1724 | Don't worry son, I love you both equally. | 1.3097 | 0.04546 | 113 | 79 | 33 | 1 |
1725 | Maybe YOU should go to obedience school. | 1.3097 | 0.05041 | 113 | 82 | 27 | 4 |
1726 | If Scout can get used to online school, so can you. | 1.3093 | 0.05744 | 97 | 72 | 20 | 5 |
1727 | You can go to school next year, all right. | 1.3091 | 0.05441 | 110 | 82 | 22 | 6 |
1728 | Son, he's smarter and cuter so get over it. | 1.3091 | 0.05883 | 110 | 85 | 16 | 9 |
1729 | Now you grab his other paw. | 1.3091 | 0.05441 | 110 | 82 | 22 | 6 |
1730 | Everyone ready for a return to in person instruction? | 1.3091 | 0.05592 | 110 | 83 | 20 | 7 |
1731 | It’s important they see us together. We need to normalize this. | 1.3091 | 0.05592 | 110 | 83 | 20 | 7 |
1732 | Rusty says you can live in his house until you're 3. | 1.3084 | 0.05379 | 107 | 79 | 23 | 5 |
1733 | Well, Donald, you told Grandma you didn't like her Christmas present last year, so she gave it to Roofus this year. | 1.3084 | 0.05541 | 107 | 80 | 21 | 6 |
1734 | No, but you're my favorite human son. | 1.3084 | 0.05213 | 107 | 78 | 25 | 4 |
1735 | HERE'S THE PUPPY I PROMSED YOU! | 1.3084 | 0.05213 | 107 | 78 | 25 | 4 |
1736 | you can do it | 1.3084 | 0.05379 | 107 | 79 | 22 | 5 |
1737 | Don't think of him as a dog. Think of him as an obedience school graduate. | 1.3084 | 0.05379 | 107 | 79 | 23 | 5 |
1738 | If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll have to start wearing Wendell's hand-me-downs." | 1.3084 | 0.05041 | 107 | 77 | 27 | 3 |
1739 | Hey Buddy, you haven't been completely replaced yet. There's still time for a late comeback. | 1.3084 | 0.05851 | 107 | 82 | 17 | 8 |
1740 | One day you’ll be best friends. | 1.3084 | 0.05041 | 107 | 77 | 27 | 3 |
1741 | Make no mistake, it’s a dog’s life | 1.3084 | 0.05041 | 107 | 80 | 18 | 6 |
1742 | i told u we would reuse ur first communion outfit | 1.3084 | 0.05379 | 107 | 79 | 23 | 5 |
1743 | Don't cry, you're a good boy, too. | 1.3077 | 0.05990 | 91 | 68 | 18 | 5 |
1744 | Don't pout, we're gonna get you a nice outfit also. | 1.3077 | 0.05479 | 104 | 77 | 22 | 5 |
1745 | hey, you were the one who wanted a brother. It's not my fault he looks cuter in your clothes | 1.3077 | 0.05127 | 104 | 75 | 26 | 3 |
1746 | she won best dressed in the dog show | 1.3063 | 0.05694 | 111 | 85 | 18 | 8 |
1747 | C’mon, be a good boy like your brother, Rover. | 1.3063 | 0.05399 | 111 | 83 | 22 | 6 |
1748 | You wouldn't like prep school anyways. | 1.3063 | 0.04922 | 111 | 80 | 28 | 3 |
1749 | See, homeschooling actually works really well for someone! | 1.3063 | 0.05245 | 111 | 82 | 24 | 5 |
1750 | Think about it. Who rescued whom? | 1.3063 | 0.05245 | 111 | 82 | 24 | 5 |
1751 | Of course his Project Runway audition went better than yours...look at your shoes! | 1.3063 | 0.05245 | 111 | 82 | 24 | 5 |
1752 | What do you mean we left your sister at home? | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
1753 | Look he’s species fluid. | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
1754 | You can be a Good Boy too Bobby! | 1.3056 | 0.05497 | 108 | 81 | 21 | 6 |
1755 | Surprise! We got you a math tutor, kiddo! | 1.3056 | 0.05172 | 108 | 79 | 25 | 4 |
1756 | When it's Take Your Child to Work Day we'll get you some fancy duds. | 1.3056 | 0.05172 | 108 | 79 | 25 | 4 |
1757 | Stop whining, Timmy. Or I'll put you back down that well! | 1.3056 | 0.05950 | 108 | 84 | 15 | 9 |
1758 | It’s OK. They always greet their new friends that way. | 1.3056 | 0.05652 | 108 | 82 | 19 | 7 |
1759 | Sulk all you want, your first novel will be nothing without this experience! | 1.3056 | 0.05497 | 108 | 81 | 21 | 6 |
1760 | He did get better grades in obedience school. | 1.3056 | 0.05652 | 108 | 82 | 19 | 7 |
1761 | What kind of foreign exchange program is this? | 1.3056 | 0.05652 | 108 | 82 | 19 | 7 |
1762 | Mom will never believe me when I say this was your idea | 1.3056 | 0.04736 | 108 | 79 | 26 | 3 |
1763 | So until regular school reopens, you can learn a lot at obedience school. | 1.3056 | 0.05652 | 108 | 82 | 19 | 7 |
1764 | Sorry, boy, our son is allergic to kids | 1.3056 | 0.05950 | 108 | 84 | 15 | 9 |
1765 | Hey, you were the one who said no kid sister. | 1.3053 | 0.05810 | 95 | 71 | 19 | 5 |
1766 | Tippy toes, Billy. You can do it. | 1.3053 | 0.05614 | 95 | 70 | 21 | 4 |
1767 | Sorry, but you're not the one who gets rewarded for begging. | 1.3053 | 0.06184 | 95 | 73 | 15 | 7 |
1768 | Yes, yes I know, but the doggy daycare was full, son. | 1.3053 | 0.06362 | 95 | 74 | 13 | 8 |
1769 | Why are you looking unhappy? I said I’d walk both of you without the leashes. | 1.3053 | 0.05810 | 95 | 71 | 19 | 5 |
1770 | Next week you get to wear the suit. | 1.3053 | 0.05810 | 95 | 71 | 19 | 5 |
1771 | I watched pensively as father tried once again to laugh off Kevin’s accusation that we were, in fact, not siblings. | 1.3053 | 0.06184 | 95 | 73 | 15 | 7 |
1772 | Be careful son.....remember mommy said 'It's me or that dog......' | 1.3048 | 0.05434 | 105 | 78 | 22 | 5 |
1773 | Buddy will be sitting next to you on the bus now. | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1774 | I don't care what she did, you can't call your sister a little bitch. | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1775 | I told you we were getting a dog sitter. | 1.3048 | 0.06071 | 105 | 82 | 14 | 9 |
1776 | Your sister's a bitch. | 1.3048 | 0.06071 | 105 | 82 | 14 | 9 |
1777 | Sorry son, but he got into that exclusive school because he wowed them at Westminster and you didnt | 1.3048 | 0.05761 | 105 | 80 | 18 | 7 |
1778 | C'mon, Billy! Obedience school just got another opening. | 1.3048 | 0.05434 | 105 | 78 | 22 | 5 |
1779 | Thumbs are not underrated, Tommy. | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1780 | Told you we would get you a brother | 1.3048 | 0.05434 | 105 | 78 | 22 | 5 |
1781 | Butch let’s me hold his, and he’s 35. | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1782 | Yes but he’s a GOOD boy! | 1.3048 | 0.05263 | 105 | 77 | 24 | 4 |
1783 | Spot loved Obedience School,you will too. | 1.3048 | 0.05761 | 105 | 80 | 18 | 7 |
1784 | You'll get a new outfit when your posture is as good as his is. | 1.3048 | 0.05086 | 105 | 76 | 26 | 3 |
1785 | Oh- so Now you want to wear the cute new suit Aunt Clara sent?! | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1786 | Now Timmy, be a good boy like Fido and I won't have to put on the leash. | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1787 | He's my best friend and you are my best favorite son. | 1.3048 | 0.05434 | 105 | 78 | 22 | 5 |
1788 | Who's a good boy? Not you! | 1.3048 | 0.05086 | 105 | 76 | 26 | 3 |
1789 | But you’re my boy! | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1790 | I promise, you’re my favorite son. | 1.3048 | 0.05263 | 105 | 77 | 24 | 4 |
1791 | Cheer up kid. Every dog has its day. | 1.3048 | 0.05434 | 105 | 78 | 22 | 5 |
1792 | See, Phideaux knows how to properly beg me. So that is why he is Daddy's favorite. | 1.3048 | 0.05761 | 105 | 80 | 18 | 7 |
1793 | He gets a treat because he’s a dog. | 1.3048 | 0.05434 | 105 | 78 | 22 | 5 |
1794 | Dalton, you'll get a nice suit like Ned's once you're potty trained. | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1795 | Now Tommy you asked for a brother | 1.3048 | 0.05263 | 105 | 77 | 24 | 4 |
1796 | C'mon! .... this would look great on you! | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1797 | Sorry, Thomas, your mom and I both heard you say you wanted a "preppie dog". | 1.3048 | 0.05263 | 105 | 77 | 24 | 4 |
1798 | It’s called obedience school and Fido can give you some pointers. | 1.3048 | 0.05434 | 105 | 78 | 22 | 5 |
1799 | I'm sure your classmates will LOVE your new brother! | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1800 | Well, he likes to dress up. | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1801 | Don't worry. Yours will have long pants. | 1.3048 | 0.05761 | 105 | 80 | 18 | 7 |
1802 | So, what's it gonna be, pre-school? or Obedience School? | 1.3048 | 0.05918 | 105 | 81 | 16 | 8 |
1803 | See, son, this is why I call him a good boy. | 1.3048 | 0.05263 | 105 | 77 | 24 | 4 |
1804 | When you learn to heel, sit, and stay, I'll take you to the park, too. | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1805 | Just the three of us, won't that be nice! | 1.3048 | 0.05263 | 105 | 77 | 24 | 4 |
1806 | Now, now don't let your bite be bigger than his bark | 1.3048 | 0.06071 | 105 | 82 | 14 | 9 |
1807 | He is only your half brother. | 1.3048 | 0.05086 | 105 | 76 | 26 | 3 |
1808 | You're the second child. Get used to it! | 1.3048 | 0.05434 | 105 | 78 | 22 | 5 |
1809 | You'll understand why he's my best friend once you grow into a man. | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1810 | Bobby, your school doesn’t require uniforms! | 1.3048 | 0.05434 | 105 | 78 | 22 | 5 |
1811 | Dad, at school they WILL know he’s a dog! | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1812 | Why can't you be more like Doug? | 1.3048 | 0.05600 | 105 | 79 | 20 | 6 |
1813 | I’m sorry. Did you want a suit too? | 1.3048 | 0.05761 | 105 | 80 | 18 | 7 |
1814 | Remember, if we get pulled over in the carpool lane, Patches is your?” “Yea yea yea, I’ve got it, my ‘human brother’... | 1.3043 | 0.05119 | 115 | 85 | 25 | 5 |
1815 | If you play nice, Fitz will tell you where he buried your bone. | 1.3036 | 0.05357 | 112 | 84 | 22 | 6 |
1816 | Oh come on, Billy. It’s not like we’re getting married tomorrow! Come on, please say hello to Gretchen | 1.3036 | 0.05649 | 112 | 86 | 18 | 8 |
1817 | Tommy, I promise, once you learn how to stand en pointe, you'll get a Little Lord Fauntleroy suit, too!! | 1.3036 | 0.05048 | 112 | 82 | 26 | 4 |
1818 | You know, you were a foster, too. | 1.3028 | 0.05453 | 109 | 82 | 21 | 6 |
1819 | We love you too, son. Just less. | 1.3028 | 0.05295 | 109 | 81 | 23 | 5 |
1820 | I swear I love you both equally | 1.3028 | 0.05132 | 109 | 80 | 25 | 4 |
1821 | Due to financial challenges we can only keep one of you, but we'll miss you, Stewie. | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
1822 | It's just a little snip, boy, nothing to worry about. | 1.3019 | 0.05221 | 106 | 78 | 24 | 4 |
1823 | It's okay, I'm capable of walking both of you. | 1.3019 | 0.05555 | 106 | 80 | 20 | 6 |
1824 | Sorry kid, this little guy will always be my best friend | 1.3019 | 0.06168 | 106 | 84 | 12 | 10 |
1825 | Quit being such a brat; at least I didn’t make YOU dress up like Little Lord Fauntleroy. | 1.3019 | 0.05221 | 106 | 78 | 24 | 4 |
1826 | You can wear a suit too if you get potty trained like your brother! | 1.3019 | 0.05390 | 106 | 79 | 22 | 5 |
1827 | But son,Sparky wears it so much better. | 1.3019 | 0.05221 | 106 | 78 | 24 | 4 |
1828 | I think we know who the good boy is. | 1.3019 | 0.05555 | 106 | 80 | 20 | 6 |
1829 | When you pass obedience training, you’ll earn a uniform. | 1.3019 | 0.05390 | 106 | 79 | 22 | 5 |
1830 | Remember what I said about obedience? | 1.3019 | 0.05714 | 106 | 81 | 18 | 7 |
1831 | If you learn how to sit and stay, you can come out with us for dinner too, Timmy. | 1.3019 | 0.05221 | 106 | 78 | 24 | 4 |
1832 | You're my favorite son, but he's my best friend. | 1.3019 | 0.05046 | 106 | 77 | 26 | 3 |
1833 | Good news. You have a new baby brother. And he's always a good boy. | 1.3019 | 0.05390 | 106 | 79 | 22 | 5 |
1834 | Don't worry,sweetheart. You're my second favorite child. | 1.3019 | 0.05869 | 106 | 82 | 16 | 8 |
1835 | Sorry, Jackson, but he obviously likes The Beatles more than you. | 1.3019 | 0.05555 | 106 | 80 | 20 | 6 |
1836 | Well, he goes out more than you. | 1.3019 | 0.05390 | 106 | 79 | 22 | 5 |
1837 | Rex had definitively answered the question of “Who’s a good boy?” | 1.3019 | 0.05390 | 106 | 79 | 22 | 5 |
1838 | Someday, Bobby, when you learn to sit and stay, you, too, can go to kindergarten. | 1.3019 | 0.05555 | 106 | 80 | 20 | 6 |
1839 | Look Timmy, that extra $600 isn’t going to earn itself | 1.3019 | 0.05555 | 106 | 80 | 20 | 6 |
1840 | I don’t mean to invalidate your emotions, Bobby, but Mr. Biggsly has just what Westminster is looking for. | 1.3019 | 0.05869 | 106 | 82 | 16 | 8 |
1841 | He didn’t question my authority | 1.3019 | 0.05221 | 106 | 78 | 24 | 4 |
1842 | Like you, he’s adopted. | 1.3019 | 0.05390 | 106 | 79 | 22 | 5 |
1843 | You were a rescue too. | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1844 | Timmy, little Rover here has trained at the finest obedience school and is clearly a pure bred. He has people to FETCH for him. | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1845 | You wouldn't even be interested going, it's a dog and pony show. | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1846 | Well he is a royal corgi, so he has to wear short pants until he is 8. | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1847 | It’s the same school fido went to and he loved it! You’ll make new friends and get snacks all day long. | 1.3010 | 0.05314 | 103 | 76 | 23 | 4 |
1848 | Don't worry, you'll get his 'hand me downs' in seven years. | 1.3010 | 0.05988 | 103 | 80 | 15 | 8 |
1849 | And when we adopted you, too, our family was complete. | 1.3010 | 0.05132 | 103 | 75 | 25 | 3 |
1850 | Kids have you heard the good news: the halfwits who ran “The New Yorker” cartoon caption contest have been fired! | 1.3010 | 0.05988 | 103 | 80 | 15 | 8 |
1851 | Of course we love you more,but how many dogs have you seen that can walk on two feet? | 1.3010 | 0.05314 | 103 | 76 | 23 | 4 |
1852 | So,your brother wears your hand-me-downs. No big deal, right? | 1.3010 | 0.05988 | 103 | 80 | 15 | 8 |
1853 | You'll get it back right after Westminster. | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1854 | Look, Buddy! Our pandemic friend is visiting you again! Why don’t you two play with the legos he didn’t chew last time? | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1855 | Listen Pavlov, act like a dachshund and we get the government funding. Got it? | 1.3010 | 0.05661 | 103 | 78 | 19 | 6 |
1856 | Relax. Kids under 12 eat for free, and we're out of kibble. | 1.3010 | 0.05132 | 103 | 75 | 25 | 3 |
1857 | But haven't you been saying you'd like a baby brother, or a dog? How about we call him Twofer? | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1858 | I’ll take you at your word, but name calling doesn’t sound like Max. | 1.3010 | 0.05314 | 103 | 76 | 23 | 4 |
1859 | Come on Jack!, your brother Vincent learned to use his toilet alone when he was 8 weeks old. | 1.3010 | 0.04943 | 103 | 74 | 27 | 2 |
1860 | No,no,just because he sniffs your butt doesn’t mean you have to. | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1861 | It’s all about breeding, son. | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1862 | Well, Bobby - when you get admitted to law school, you can have a nice suit too. | 1.3010 | 0.05988 | 103 | 80 | 15 | 8 |
1863 | Yes he’s super cute and everyone wants to play with him and pet him but you have opposable thumbs . | 1.3010 | 0.05132 | 103 | 75 | 25 | 3 |
1864 | You'll be my number one man again as soon as you learn to conform and cooperate like he did. | 1.3010 | 0.05827 | 103 | 79 | 17 | 7 |
1865 | Relax, son. He will only live with us for the next 10-15 years. | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1866 | “He doesn’t want us to walk him. He wants us to walk WITH him.” | 1.3010 | 0.05661 | 103 | 78 | 19 | 6 |
1867 | Now it’s your turn to fetch the ball, Billy | 1.3010 | 0.05827 | 103 | 79 | 17 | 7 |
1868 | The reason we got kicked off of the plane is because you wouldn’t wear a mask, son. Don’t blame this on our dog’s flawless disguise | 1.3010 | 0.05490 | 103 | 77 | 21 | 5 |
1869 | Look Tyler, you have to stop screaming ‘Squirrel’ at Atticus. Now, give me paw. | 1.3010 | 0.05314 | 103 | 76 | 23 | 4 |
1870 | Letting your pup wear your clothes, eat off your plate, and chew up your stuff are small sacrifices to make to show your love. | 1.3010 | 0.05314 | 103 | 76 | 23 | 4 |
1871 | Grandma spent good money on that suit, if you don’t want to wear it, I’ll give it to someone who’ll appreciate it. | 1.3010 | 0.05314 | 103 | 76 | 23 | 4 |
1872 | It’s the first time for both of you without leashes so don’t blow this for her. | 1.3010 | 0.05132 | 103 | 75 | 25 | 3 |
1873 | Yes son, grandma would still notice the difference even if she's on Skype. | 1.3010 | 0.05661 | 103 | 78 | 19 | 6 |
1874 | He's been a very good boy, he gets to wear the suit. | 1.3000 | 0.05239 | 120 | 91 | 22 | 7 |
1875 | You're a good boy too... just not the BEST boy | 1.2991 | 0.05347 | 107 | 80 | 22 | 5 |
1876 | But you said you wanted to walk the dog. | 1.2991 | 0.05007 | 107 | 78 | 26 | 3 |
1877 | Remember what I taught you about sharing, Fido is trying out to be a Hospital Therapy Dog today. | 1.2991 | 0.04641 | 107 | 76 | 30 | 1 |
1878 | Why can't you be a good as your brother? | 1.2991 | 0.05510 | 107 | 81 | 20 | 6 |
1879 | If you learn to give me your paw properly, you’ll get a treat just like your brother did. | 1.2991 | 0.05667 | 107 | 82 | 18 | 7 |
1880 | You'll be with her family for a week. It's going to be fun!! | 1.2991 | 0.05347 | 107 | 80 | 22 | 5 |
1881 | Just because he's a "son of a bitch" doesn't mean you can call him one. | 1.2991 | 0.05667 | 107 | 82 | 18 | 7 |
1882 | If you don't lighten up, I'm making YOU wear the suit next time! | 1.2991 | 0.05007 | 107 | 78 | 26 | 3 |
1883 | You can take your shoes off when we get home, Archie. | 1.2991 | 0.05007 | 107 | 78 | 26 | 3 |
1884 | Its ok son. You can be man's second best friend | 1.2991 | 0.05007 | 107 | 78 | 26 | 3 |
1885 | Don’t worry, Timmy. We’ll get you a nice suit too, when you turn seven, like Fluffy. | 1.2991 | 0.05007 | 107 | 78 | 26 | 3 |
1886 | We just brought Rover home from Obedience School, you're next! | 1.2991 | 0.05510 | 107 | 81 | 20 | 6 |
1887 | Daddy loves both of you equally." | 1.2991 | 0.05007 | 107 | 78 | 26 | 3 |
1888 | And when you're a man, he'll be your best friend. | 1.2991 | 0.05510 | 107 | 81 | 20 | 6 |
1889 | C'mon Tommy. Obedience school will be so much fun! Look what it did for your dog! | 1.2991 | 0.05667 | 107 | 82 | 18 | 7 |
1890 | Johnnie, he may be a son of a bitch, but he's still your step brother. | 1.2991 | 0.05510 | 107 | 81 | 20 | 6 |
1891 | Just because he's well dressed and polite it doesn't mean he's my favorite. | 1.2991 | 0.05007 | 107 | 78 | 26 | 3 |
1892 | I know, but he really likes to dress up. | 1.2991 | 0.05347 | 107 | 80 | 22 | 5 |
1893 | Yes you’re adopted. But that doesn’t mean we love you any less than your brother. | 1.2991 | 0.05180 | 107 | 79 | 24 | 4 |
1894 | Daddy loves both his children equally. | 1.2991 | 0.05180 | 107 | 79 | 24 | 4 |
1895 | Don't be a sore loser. He won the fashion contest by 11,780 votes! | 1.2991 | 0.05180 | 107 | 79 | 24 | 4 |
1896 | You better straighten up, young man, or I'll send YOU to Obedience School! | 1.2991 | 0.05667 | 107 | 82 | 18 | 7 |
1897 | I promise you’ll enjoy boarding school-look what it’s done for your brother! | 1.2991 | 0.05510 | 107 | 81 | 20 | 6 |
1898 | Frank, I 'm taking your new brother Fred off to his socially distanced puppy group. When I get back I'll home school you. | 1.2991 | 0.05667 | 107 | 82 | 18 | 7 |
1899 | Why are you so angry? You got too big for those clothes, but they're just the right size for good ol Buddy. | 1.2991 | 0.05510 | 107 | 81 | 20 | 6 |
1900 | You can keep walking on two legs. | 1.2991 | 0.05180 | 107 | 79 | 24 | 4 |
1901 | Maybe if you make an effort to get along with people better, one day you’ll have a best friend too, | 1.2991 | 0.05347 | 107 | 80 | 22 | 5 |
1902 | Smile and I'll give you a treat, too. | 1.2991 | 0.05180 | 107 | 79 | 24 | 4 |
1903 | Ok, we'll swap outfits and you can use the tailhole for toilet training. | 1.2991 | 0.05970 | 107 | 84 | 14 | 9 |
1904 | He'll love you like a brother, and always be your best friend. | 1.2991 | 0.05007 | 107 | 78 | 26 | 3 |
1905 | Donny, just because he won doesn’t mean you lost, ok? | 1.2991 | 0.05970 | 107 | 84 | 14 | 9 |
1906 | We are all brothers, buddy! | 1.2991 | 0.05347 | 107 | 80 | 22 | 5 |
1907 | I love both my boys equally- I swear! | 1.2991 | 0.05347 | 107 | 80 | 22 | 5 |
1908 | Percy goes in the potty... | 1.2991 | 0.06116 | 107 | 85 | 12 | 10 |
1909 | I told you, I’m not replacing your mother. I just fell in love. And I’m sure you’ll see what I see if you give this a chance. | 1.2991 | 0.05180 | 107 | 79 | 24 | 4 |
1910 | If he can wag, you can share! | 1.2991 | 0.05347 | 107 | 80 | 22 | 5 |
1911 | It’s not my fault he does better on Instagram than you. | 1.2991 | 0.05180 | 107 | 79 | 24 | 4 |
1912 | Why can’t you be a good boy like Buster? | 1.2991 | 0.05180 | 107 | 79 | 24 | 4 |
1913 | He has more likes on Instagram than you do, so technically, he’s the big brother now. | 1.2991 | 0.05180 | 107 | 79 | 24 | 4 |
1914 | I heard all the girls at school find your best friend quite fetching. | 1.2982 | 0.05276 | 114 | 86 | 22 | 6 |
1915 | Now, Little Donald, like I've told you before: if you lie down with dogs-- no matter how well dressed they are-- you'll wind up with fleas. | 1.2981 | 0.05614 | 104 | 79 | 19 | 6 |
1916 | You can roll in the squirrel carcass first next time. | 1.2981 | 0.05778 | 104 | 80 | 17 | 7 |
1917 | but you can't fit it anymore, and he is a good boy! | 1.2981 | 0.05271 | 104 | 77 | 23 | 4 |
1918 | You'll always be my second favorite child. | 1.2981 | 0.05445 | 104 | 78 | 21 | 5 |
1919 | Yes! You’re twins! Don’t ask me again, Ollie! | 1.2981 | 0.05271 | 104 | 77 | 23 | 4 |
1920 | See? Skipper doesn't mind getting dressed up! | 1.2981 | 0.05614 | 104 | 79 | 19 | 6 |
1921 | Now Norman, be nice to Rockwell. | 1.2981 | 0.05937 | 104 | 81 | 15 | 8 |
1922 | But he’s a pedigree; we’re just mutts. | 1.2981 | 0.05271 | 104 | 77 | 23 | 4 |
1923 | I want a real brother! | 1.2981 | 0.05614 | 104 | 79 | 19 | 6 |
1924 | I'm sorry son, but I've already cut the hole for his tail. | 1.2981 | 0.05271 | 104 | 77 | 23 | 4 |
1925 | Well, of course I like him better - he's man's best friend! | 1.2981 | 0.05614 | 104 | 79 | 19 | 6 |
1926 | We didn’t just get you a dog - she is the Notorious D-O-G! | 1.2981 | 0.04904 | 104 | 75 | 27 | 2 |
1927 | No, we can't have hot dogs for dinner. | 1.2981 | 0.05091 | 104 | 76 | 25 | 3 |
1928 | Don't worry, you'll enjoy obedience school. | 1.2981 | 0.05271 | 104 | 77 | 22 | 4 |
1929 | It’s not that we love him more, it’s just that he’s more obedient. | 1.2981 | 0.05778 | 104 | 80 | 17 | 7 |
1930 | When you stop peeing in the corner you can have your suit back. | 1.2981 | 0.05778 | 104 | 80 | 17 | 7 |
1931 | Now, be a good boy like your brother. | 1.2981 | 0.04904 | 104 | 75 | 27 | 2 |
1932 | Maybe I should send you to obedience school" | 1.2981 | 0.05271 | 104 | 77 | 23 | 4 |
1933 | I know we said we were just fostering, Charlie, but we’ve decided to adopt.” | 1.2981 | 0.05445 | 104 | 78 | 21 | 5 |
1934 | Don't fret son...you'll always be my second best friend. | 1.2981 | 0.05614 | 104 | 79 | 19 | 6 |
1935 | It doesn’t mean you have to wear the leash. | 1.2981 | 0.05445 | 104 | 78 | 21 | 5 |
1936 | But you'll LIKE sleeping in the doghouse. | 1.2981 | 0.05091 | 104 | 76 | 25 | 3 |
1937 | Isn't it exciting Timmy? Your mother is part Royal Wolfhound. | 1.2981 | 0.05614 | 104 | 79 | 19 | 6 |
1938 | I told you your mother was a bitch | 1.2981 | 0.05445 | 104 | 78 | 21 | 5 |
1939 | Look, I've kept my promise to get you a brother! | 1.2981 | 0.05271 | 104 | 77 | 23 | 4 |
1940 | Don’t be grumpy, it doesn’t fit you anymore. | 1.2981 | 0.05271 | 104 | 77 | 23 | 4 |
1941 | He likes me best. | 1.2981 | 0.05271 | 104 | 77 | 23 | 4 |
1942 | Be a good boy, like your brother, and you’ll get a treat! | 1.2981 | 0.05091 | 104 | 76 | 25 | 3 |
1943 | Don't worry, Timmy, you're going to LOVE the farm upstate | 1.2981 | 0.05937 | 104 | 81 | 15 | 8 |
1944 | He's 54 in dog years now so yes, you have to obey him" | 1.2981 | 0.05614 | 104 | 79 | 19 | 6 |
1945 | Ah, buddy...It’s not personal. Daddy just wants to boost his Instagram follows. | 1.2981 | 0.05778 | 104 | 80 | 17 | 7 |
1946 | Now why can’t you be a “good boy” like your little brother | 1.2981 | 0.05271 | 104 | 77 | 23 | 4 |
1947 | Next one who s***s in the house is up for adoption. | 1.2981 | 0.05778 | 104 | 80 | 17 | 7 |
1948 | Only good boys get suits. | 1.2970 | 0.06060 | 101 | 79 | 14 | 8 |
1949 | Hey Bobby- Good news! Your brother Sparky just got into the gifted and talented kindergarten program at your elementary school. You can take the bus together! | 1.2970 | 0.05894 | 101 | 78 | 16 | 7 |
1950 | Today is his turn to wear the suit and you wear the shoes. Tomorrow you can switch. | 1.2970 | 0.05724 | 101 | 77 | 18 | 6 |
1951 | He's going to a formal party at the Kennel Club, kids are not invited. | 1.2963 | 0.05465 | 108 | 82 | 20 | 6 |
1952 | Mommy said that two of us need a little time out.” | 1.2959 | 0.05840 | 98 | 75 | 17 | 6 |
1953 | Fred got all dressed up just to meet you! | 1.2959 | 0.05657 | 98 | 74 | 19 | 5 |
1954 | Come on now. You'll get your turn to go clothes shopping. | 1.2959 | 0.05840 | 98 | 75 | 17 | 6 |
1955 | Rexy just graduated summa cum laude, K9U - you start homeschool tomorrow! | 1.2952 | 0.05567 | 105 | 80 | 19 | 6 |
1956 | He’s a pet; agree? | 1.2952 | 0.05400 | 105 | 79 | 21 | 5 |
1957 | Come on Fido let’s take Joshua for walkies | 1.2952 | 0.05400 | 105 | 79 | 21 | 5 |
1958 | I keep trying to tell you, Stuart Little isn’t real. | 1.2952 | 0.04865 | 105 | 76 | 27 | 2 |
1959 | Life is ruff sometimes, pal! | 1.2952 | 0.05567 | 105 | 80 | 19 | 6 |
1960 | Well, at least he doesn’t poop his pants. | 1.2952 | 0.05567 | 105 | 80 | 19 | 6 |
1961 | Didn't you say you wanted a little brother and a dog for Christmas? | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1962 | Wags is my favorite but don't worry, you're going to outlive him. | 1.2947 | 0.05962 | 95 | 73 | 16 | 6 |
1963 | Come on, lick and make up... | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1964 | You can go first on the next fire hydrant, I promise. | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1965 | You wanted a dog, I wanted obedience. Win-win. | 1.2947 | 0.05370 | 95 | 70 | 22 | 3 |
1966 | Just pretend it’s your little brother. | 1.2947 | 0.05574 | 95 | 71 | 20 | 4 |
1967 | Good boys get treats. | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1968 | Don't worry Tommy....We're going to find you a good home!!! | 1.2947 | 0.06147 | 95 | 74 | 14 | 7 |
1969 | You can still have the lower bunk! | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1970 | Now, who's the clever boy? | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1971 | Come on, boy! Roll over! | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1972 | Are you calling him a liar? | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1973 | And this time its you thats going to "live on a farm" | 1.2947 | 0.05370 | 95 | 70 | 22 | 3 |
1974 | The truth is Billy, that Rex is our actual son and you were adopted. | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1975 | Now be nice to your brother! | 1.2947 | 0.05574 | 95 | 71 | 20 | 4 |
1976 | He's family, too. | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1977 | If you behave, you can get a treat too! | 1.2947 | 0.05574 | 95 | 71 | 20 | 4 |
1978 | Sorry son,no fireworks. You know how they upset your little brother. | 1.2947 | 0.05574 | 95 | 71 | 20 | 4 |
1979 | Because you didn't wag your tail, that's why! | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
1980 | How do you expect him to play with you? You're 9 and he's 63. We're on our way to apply for his Social Security. | 1.2941 | 0.05675 | 102 | 78 | 18 | 6 |
1981 | See what a good boy your brother is? | 1.2941 | 0.05675 | 102 | 78 | 18 | 6 |
1982 | Now apologize for telling your sister she looks like a dog. | 1.2941 | 0.05501 | 102 | 77 | 20 | 5 |
1983 | Since you were so naughty, Donald, we are replacing you with a "Good Boy." | 1.2941 | 0.05675 | 102 | 78 | 18 | 6 |
1984 | Now remember Timmy, no biting! | 1.2941 | 0.05501 | 102 | 77 | 20 | 5 |
1985 | Your mom wanted you to have a canine brother to help you survive in this dog eat dog world! | 1.2941 | 0.05501 | 102 | 77 | 20 | 5 |
1986 | He's my best friend, but you'll always be my son. | 1.2941 | 0.05675 | 102 | 78 | 18 | 6 |
1987 | Tommy realized his father's definition of a "play date' was way off! | 1.2941 | 0.05501 | 102 | 77 | 20 | 5 |
1988 | Oh, c'mon! You're just as smart as he is! | 1.2941 | 0.05322 | 102 | 76 | 22 | 4 |
1989 | Don’t be silly...I love you both equally. | 1.2941 | 0.05675 | 102 | 78 | 18 | 6 |
1990 | 'When you win a blue ribbon you can dress that way too' | 1.2941 | 0.05136 | 102 | 75 | 24 | 3 |
1991 | He's your cousin. Stop pulling his tail. | 1.2941 | 0.05675 | 102 | 78 | 18 | 6 |
1992 | Jimmy, it’s take your kids to work day, so be on your best behavior. | 1.2935 | 0.05473 | 92 | 68 | 21 | 3 |
1993 | I know, but he was with the kittens when they lost their mittens, and then they said 'lose your shoes'... | 1.2929 | 0.05607 | 99 | 75 | 19 | 5 |
1994 | I knew we should’ve re-homed you when the puppy came, but your mom wasn’t having it. | 1.2929 | 0.06134 | 99 | 78 | 13 | 8 |
1995 | Meet your new influencer. | 1.2929 | 0.05607 | 99 | 75 | 19 | 5 |
1996 | Bootsie is twenty-one doggy years so he can trade on Wall Street. | 1.2929 | 0.05788 | 99 | 76 | 17 | 6 |
1997 | Sure he’s better at tennis, football, school, soccer, rugby, bowling, basketball, badminton, dancing, baseball and he’s cuter, but you ARE taller. | 1.2929 | 0.05420 | 99 | 74 | 21 | 4 |
1998 | If you’d just just wear the nice clothes your mother picked out, like Sweetie is, you’d be a lot happier. | 1.2929 | 0.05788 | 99 | 76 | 17 | 6 |
1999 | Aw, come on now, you know I don't love either one of you more than the other. | 1.2929 | 0.05420 | 99 | 74 | 21 | 4 |
2000 | Dad, you assured me when the new arrival got here that I’d still be top dog. | 1.2929 | 0.05788 | 99 | 76 | 17 | 6 |
2001 | He could become your best friend. | 1.2929 | 0.05026 | 99 | 72 | 25 | 2 |
2002 | Your sister and I have discussed it and we’ve decided to re-home you. | 1.2929 | 0.05964 | 99 | 77 | 15 | 7 |
2003 | In this dog-eat-dog world, son, you can't keep riding on Skippy's coattails. | 1.2929 | 0.05788 | 99 | 76 | 17 | 6 |
2004 | Your mother and I are heading out, please listen to the baby sitter! | 1.2929 | 0.05788 | 99 | 76 | 17 | 6 |
2005 | Sorry, Aiden, the saying is 'every dog has its day'. Unfortunately, you're just a human. | 1.2925 | 0.05356 | 106 | 80 | 21 | 5 |
2006 | I reacted the same way when your grandfather told me. | 1.2925 | 0.05356 | 106 | 80 | 21 | 5 |
2007 | Who wants a treat? | 1.2921 | 0.05806 | 89 | 67 | 18 | 4 |
2008 | Chin up, Bobby - in dog years, you'd already be dead. | 1.2913 | 0.05627 | 103 | 79 | 18 | 6 |
2009 | Come on. Speak boy. Speak. | 1.2913 | 0.05278 | 103 | 77 | 22 | 4 |
2010 | Who's almost a good boy?! | 1.2913 | 0.05278 | 103 | 77 | 22 | 4 |
2011 | That’s right, Chester now wants you to retrieve it. | 1.2913 | 0.06113 | 103 | 82 | 12 | 9 |
2012 | He doesn't wet his bed. | 1.2913 | 0.05627 | 103 | 79 | 18 | 6 |
2013 | You would like him, he loves to play all day! | 1.2913 | 0.05278 | 103 | 77 | 22 | 4 |
2014 | Let’s try a new game! It’s called “Obedience.” | 1.2913 | 0.05094 | 103 | 76 | 24 | 3 |
2015 | You bought him a suit! | 1.2913 | 0.05627 | 103 | 79 | 18 | 6 |
2016 | Whose a good boy, Billy. | 1.2913 | 0.05627 | 103 | 79 | 18 | 6 |
2017 | It’s time to shake and make up | 1.2913 | 0.05793 | 103 | 80 | 16 | 7 |
2018 | I told you not to race him for the suit. | 1.2913 | 0.05627 | 103 | 79 | 18 | 5 |
2019 | Tonight, I’ll read you the bedtime story about the prodigal son. | 1.2900 | 0.05374 | 100 | 75 | 21 | 4 |
2020 | Don't be so sad. I'll find some shoes for him. | 1.2900 | 0.05738 | 100 | 77 | 17 | 6 |
2021 | Jimmy, don't be mad! When you learn to fetch, I'll get you a little suit, too! | 1.2900 | 0.04984 | 100 | 73 | 25 | 2 |
2022 | I know you don't get along with your brother but really, his bark is worse than his bite. | 1.2900 | 0.05183 | 100 | 74 | 23 | 3 |
2023 | Don't you remember? I told you we were going to adopt a new member of the family. | 1.2900 | 0.05279 | 100 | 77 | 18 | 5 |
2024 | You can have your treat when you behave like Pup-Pup does. | 1.2900 | 0.05374 | 100 | 75 | 21 | 4 |
2025 | Don't worry, it's ok if you are not comfortable walking on your hind legs. | 1.2900 | 0.05738 | 100 | 77 | 17 | 6 |
2026 | Be nice, Jimmy, otherwise when you both grow up, he'll bite your head off... | 1.2900 | 0.05738 | 100 | 77 | 17 | 6 |
2027 | Jojo was a circus dog. YOU are the one with the big boy pants. | 1.2900 | 0.05374 | 100 | 75 | 21 | 4 |
2028 | Everyone gets their fifteen minutes of fame, but that's an hour and a half in dog years. | 1.2900 | 0.05738 | 100 | 77 | 17 | 6 |
2029 | Father John is in quarantine. He sent Deacon Fideaux for your catechism tutoring today. | 1.2900 | 0.06079 | 100 | 79 | 13 | 8 |
2030 | Tell your brother you're sorry for calling him adopted. | 1.2900 | 0.05183 | 100 | 74 | 23 | 3 |
2031 | Oh, C'mon Freddie. Try to be more like Ralph. | 1.2900 | 0.05374 | 100 | 75 | 21 | 4 |
2032 | Of course I’m not playing favorites, but he IS in college. | 1.2900 | 0.05559 | 100 | 76 | 19 | 5 |
2033 | If you were potty-trained you’d get a fancy suit too. Hashtag goals, kid! | 1.2900 | 0.05374 | 100 | 75 | 21 | 4 |
2034 | WELL WE DID EVERYTHING WE COULD, INITIALLY, TO INVEST IN YOUR FUTURE , BUT UNLIKE FIDO HERE, YOU FOUGHT US ALL THE WAY | 1.2900 | 0.05738 | 100 | 77 | 17 | 6 |
2035 | Son, I didn’t say I loved the dog as much as you, I said I loved the dog more than you | 1.2900 | 0.05559 | 100 | 76 | 19 | 5 |
2036 | Yes, he IS your cousin. And yes, you have to pick it up if he poops at the park. | 1.2900 | 0.05183 | 100 | 74 | 23 | 3 |
2037 | This is my NEW “little man” because he obeys me better than you do. | 1.2900 | 0.05559 | 100 | 76 | 19 | 5 |
2038 | You need to be nice to your bother, even if he is behaving like the son-of-a-bitch. | 1.2900 | 0.05559 | 100 | 76 | 19 | 5 |
2039 | « This is our therapist and our ticket to get out of the house, be nice to him» | 1.2900 | 0.05559 | 100 | 76 | 19 | 5 |
2040 | I told you your cousin is a bit different...he’s English. . | 1.2900 | 0.05374 | 100 | 75 | 21 | 4 |
2041 | It’s like you’re not even trying to be such a good boy. | 1.2900 | 0.05374 | 100 | 75 | 21 | 4 |
2042 | I’m sorry son, but Fido is much better at catch than you | 1.2900 | 0.05911 | 100 | 78 | 15 | 7 |
2043 | You will get used to it. It’s called meritocracy. | 1.2900 | 0.05559 | 100 | 76 | 19 | 5 |
2044 | Your therapist will thank me later. | 1.2900 | 0.05559 | 100 | 76 | 19 | 5 |
2045 | You're a good boy, too. | 1.2887 | 0.05276 | 97 | 72 | 22 | 3 |
2046 | It could be worse. We could have given you his shock collar. | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2047 | Mom was just kidding when she mistook him for you | 1.2887 | 0.05668 | 97 | 74 | 18 | 5 |
2048 | Just because your aunt is a bitch doesn't mean you can't be polite to your cousin. | 1.2887 | 0.05668 | 97 | 74 | 18 | 5 |
2049 | Okay--next week YOU can wear "The Little Lord Fauntleroy" outfit! | 1.2887 | 0.05668 | 97 | 74 | 18 | 5 |
2050 | if he can,you can | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2051 | He ain't heavy, he's your brother. | 1.2887 | 0.05855 | 97 | 75 | 16 | 6 |
2052 | No, he's not my favorite. I love you boys both the same. | 1.2887 | 0.04851 | 97 | 70 | 26 | 1 |
2053 | Hunter,you must understand that dogs now have human names,so Noah now dresses like you used to. | 1.2887 | 0.05668 | 97 | 74 | 18 | 5 |
2054 | You should be happy that your mom and I have embraced moral relativism! | 1.2887 | 0.05068 | 97 | 71 | 24 | 2 |
2055 | Boarding school will do wonders for you, too! | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2056 | Try using your human words. | 1.2887 | 0.05276 | 97 | 72 | 22 | 3 |
2057 | just because your new stepmom is a bitch doesn’t mean you can call her one | 1.2887 | 0.05668 | 97 | 74 | 18 | 5 |
2058 | Remember how important it is to share. You got to wear the suit yesterday. | 1.2887 | 0.05276 | 97 | 72 | 22 | 3 |
2059 | No son, the right word is envy not jealousy. | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2060 | Say hello to your new tutor, Timmy. | 1.2887 | 0.05276 | 97 | 72 | 22 | 3 |
2061 | If Fido can be housebroken, so can you! | 1.2887 | 0.04625 | 97 | 74 | 20 | 3 |
2062 | I don't want to be just like him. | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2063 | Now that he's your height, you can share clothes | 1.2887 | 0.05668 | 97 | 74 | 18 | 5 |
2064 | Look son, a dog is a man’s best friend not a grouchy kid who wants an ice cream cone. | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2065 | Just one more Instagram post for Mommy and we will be done. | 1.2887 | 0.05855 | 97 | 75 | 16 | 6 |
2066 | C'mon, tell Rex he looks fetching! | 1.2887 | 0.05276 | 97 | 72 | 22 | 3 |
2067 | If you can stand and walk on your tippy-toes, I'll get you a short pants suit as well. | 1.2887 | 0.05855 | 97 | 75 | 16 | 6 |
2068 | What's wrong with second best friend? | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2069 | Obedience School is a tradition in this family. | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2070 | That's not true...I love you both equally." | 1.2887 | 0.05068 | 97 | 71 | 24 | 2 |
2071 | Remember, its not hard. Eat your meals, do tricks and be my best friend. You'll catch on. | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2072 | Don't cry, Tommy. You really ARE a son of a bitch, just like your little brother, Corky. | 1.2887 | 0.05668 | 97 | 74 | 18 | 5 |
2073 | Johnny, stop eating Rover's homework. | 1.2887 | 0.05855 | 97 | 75 | 16 | 6 |
2074 | Don't be sad Billy. Next year we're sending you to Obedience School. | 1.2887 | 0.05276 | 97 | 72 | 22 | 3 |
2075 | Okay, now you say you’re sorry and lick HIS face. | 1.2887 | 0.05276 | 97 | 72 | 22 | 3 |
2076 | A little sister would’ve been better than this. | 1.2887 | 0.05668 | 97 | 74 | 18 | 5 |
2077 | When you get 10,000 followers, we’ll get you a new outfit too | 1.2887 | 0.05276 | 97 | 72 | 22 | 3 |
2078 | He learned how to sit, stay, and potty train before you. Of course he gets half of your inheritance. | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2079 | When you stop peeing your pants, you can wear nice suits, too. | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2080 | C'mon honey, you know he's much better behaved than you and also way more grateful. | 1.2887 | 0.05668 | 97 | 74 | 18 | 5 |
2081 | I just think you’ll be happier at your mother’s | 1.2887 | 0.05668 | 97 | 74 | 18 | 5 |
2082 | If we give him a coffee and a bow tie, Instagram will lose it. | 1.2887 | 0.05475 | 97 | 73 | 20 | 4 |
2083 | Calling your brother dogface isn't goi ng to make us love him any less, Timmy. | 1.2887 | 0.05855 | 97 | 75 | 16 | 6 |
2084 | obedience school or a leash. you get the same choice he did; the suit is optional. | 1.2887 | 0.05276 | 97 | 72 | 22 | 3 |
2085 | You can have your suit back when you lose the weight. | 1.2881 | 0.05121 | 118 | 90 | 22 | 6 |
2086 | Don't be silly, you're my best friend too. | 1.2874 | 0.05642 | 87 | 65 | 19 | 3 |
2087 | Father Fido isn't Catholic. He's Episcopalian just like you, Tippy. Really! | 1.2872 | 0.05978 | 94 | 73 | 15 | 6 |
2088 | I don't believe little Jeeves would do that. It's not like him. | 1.2871 | 0.05328 | 101 | 76 | 21 | 4 |
2089 | Now Tommy, if you wanted a normal dog like all of your friends have, you should have been more specific. | 1.2857 | 0.05618 | 98 | 75 | 18 | 5 |
2090 | Reggie here likes going to school. You will too, I promise. | 1.2857 | 0.05230 | 98 | 73 | 22 | 3 |
2091 | He’ll help you pledge at obedience school. | 1.2857 | 0.05427 | 98 | 74 | 20 | 4 |
2092 | You told me that I was supposed to be the teachers pet, Dad!!! | 1.2857 | 0.05802 | 98 | 76 | 16 | 6 |
2093 | Hey, Donnie, life is not always fair. Your mommy and I just happen to like dogs better than kids. | 1.2857 | 0.05618 | 98 | 75 | 18 | 5 |
2094 | Remember, he's seven times older than you. You'll get a proper suit when you're his age. | 1.2857 | 0.05618 | 98 | 75 | 18 | 5 |
2095 | When you learn to heel, beg, sit, and come you’ll get nice clothes too. | 1.2857 | 0.05618 | 98 | 75 | 18 | 5 |
2096 | Don't pull your brother's tail! | 1.2857 | 0.05230 | 98 | 73 | 22 | 3 |
2097 | Barkley says this time you can throw the ball and he'll fetch! | 1.2857 | 0.05230 | 98 | 73 | 22 | 3 |
2098 | ‘Frankly, if you want me to treat you like a human, you have to act like a human! Look at your brother! Always so well dressed, so polite! He was the star of the night last weekend when we had the Gallager's over for drinks.’ | 1.2857 | 0.05427 | 98 | 74 | 20 | 4 |
2099 | Now little Timmy,it's your turn to go to obedience school | 1.2857 | 0.05025 | 98 | 72 | 24 | 2 |
2100 | But Charlie, you can't pull off a short pant. | 1.2857 | 0.04811 | 98 | 71 | 26 | 1 |
2101 | Welcome, this is your new forever home. | 1.2857 | 0.05025 | 98 | 72 | 24 | 2 |
2102 | Either you hold my hand or I get the leash out. | 1.2857 | 0.05230 | 98 | 73 | 22 | 3 |
2103 | Now Billy, we all agreed that if we adopted a little brother for you that we’d each need to do our part to make him feel like a member of our family... Now put on a happy face, compliment him on his new suit, and let’s start acting like you’re excited to smell each others butts. | 1.2857 | 0.05981 | 98 | 77 | 14 | 7 |
2104 | Timmy, you don’t have to stand six feet apart from this good boy | 1.2857 | 0.06005 | 84 | 64 | 16 | 4 |
2105 | Now kids, I know 2021 is scary, but we have to try it anyway. | 1.2857 | 0.05230 | 98 | 73 | 22 | 3 |
2106 | Here’s that puppy I promised you for taking daddy’s side in his divorce from mommy! | 1.2857 | 0.05802 | 98 | 76 | 16 | 6 |
2107 | I know you wanted to wear the fancy clothes, but he just really pulls it off. | 1.2857 | 0.05427 | 98 | 74 | 20 | 4 |
2108 | Clothes make a man. Naked dogs have little or no influence on society. | 1.2857 | 0.05618 | 98 | 75 | 18 | 5 |
2109 | Make it look like an accident. | 1.2843 | 0.05283 | 102 | 77 | 21 | 4 |
2110 | Who's a good boy? You are! Yes, you're a good boy. Good boy! | 1.2843 | 0.05283 | 102 | 77 | 21 | 4 |
2111 | You outgrew it | 1.2843 | 0.05639 | 102 | 79 | 17 | 6 |
2112 | When you're a good boy, you'll get extra screen time too! | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2113 | He’s dressed to the 9’s ...K9’s | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2114 | There, there,Billy, don't be mad. Roscoe beat you fair and square for best in show. | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2115 | Stop accusing me of favoratism -- I don't have a dog in this fight! | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2116 | C'mon buddy. You know that biting never works. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2117 | Don’t worry you’ll grow a tail too someday if you go into politics, something has to come out on that end” | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2118 | Why do sad? This year we got you both a brother AND a dog! | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2119 | Daddy only favors Max because he does what he's told and doesn't need to go to college. | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2120 | Pffft...who said you were the runt of the litter? | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2121 | Why can't you be more like Schatzi? | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2122 | When I say stay, that means both of you | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2123 | Some fathers can have two best friends. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2124 | Every dog has it’s day. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2125 | If you work on obedience, being the ugly one won't matter. | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2126 | Son, you’re getting too big to wear Spot’s hand-me-downs. | 1.2842 | 0.06290 | 95 | 76 | 11 | 8 |
2127 | Even without the suit he gets more likes. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2128 | I know all he can do is bark, but he still is your brother. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2129 | It was this, or a leash for you. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2130 | I'm sorry Son, you had your chance. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2131 | Cheer up. It’s only for a day, and you can wear his collar! | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2132 | Rex says he stuck his tongue out at you to show he wanted to play. What can you tell me about it? | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2133 | You did not want to wear it to church. Why can't fido? | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2134 | Of course we love you, Fido is just more photogenic. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2135 | Meet your new little brother, he’s adopted too! | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2136 | What’s normal these days, anyway? | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2137 | What part of ‘treats are for good boys’ did you not understand? | 1.2842 | 0.05111 | 95 | 70 | 23 | 2 |
2138 | Sorry Billy, he fetches better than you do! | 1.2842 | 0.05111 | 95 | 70 | 23 | 2 |
2139 | It's what all dogs wear when the graduate from an Ivy League obedience school..... Your turn will come. | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2140 | Let’s take it easy on Kenny—I hear his mother’s a real bitch. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2141 | You don't have to call her mom yet, but can you please stop using "that" word? | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2142 | It’s like I told your mom, dog years give him seniority in this household. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2143 | I’m sorry son. I reevaluated my priorities in 2020. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2144 | Johnny, I told you not to trade your brother for a dog. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2145 | Just think of it as a dog day afternoon. | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2146 | Sit! I said sit! | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2147 | Go on - give him your shoes. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2148 | Just because Rufus dresses better does NOT mean we love him more! | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2149 | Be a good boy, like Oliver | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2150 | ...Not only that but he's already in our pod." | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2151 | You see Billy, I told you Daddy's eye surgery was a sucess. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2152 | And that sort of attitude is why Scruffy is the new favorite child | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2153 | You're still my No. 1 Son | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2154 | You stay! We'll play fetch when I get back! | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2155 | It’s not that it fits him well, it’s that it fits him at all. | 1.2842 | 0.05111 | 95 | 70 | 23 | 2 |
2156 | . . . and all you have to do is be a "good boy." | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2157 | You knew the rule, Horace, the first one to get potty trained gets the bedroom | 1.2842 | 0.06109 | 95 | 75 | 13 | 7 |
2158 | Just tell me sooner, Billy. Remember, he's been house trained long before you were born. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2159 | He’s right! The overbred in funny suits do rule the world. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2160 | No problem, you can have a collar too. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2161 | I know but your bite is worse than your bark | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2162 | I don't know why the shelter named him "Little Dog Fauntleroy" but we can easily change it to Cedric if that's what you want. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2163 | You two will also be sharing a bathroom, aka 'the back yard.' | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2164 | C'mon, Billy, let's go sniff your new step-mother. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2165 | Guess who was voted Most Likely to Succeed in dog training school. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2166 | Dad, Fido’s the other one. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2167 | Who’s a good boy?! Who’s a good boy?! Not you!? Not You! | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2168 | Behave yourself and don't forget that one of you will be returned once the pandemic is over. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2169 | Sparks can’t do training school remotely | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2170 | Your mom and I love you both equally. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2171 | It's just for his obedience school pictures. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2172 | You have to learn to dress for success. It’s a dog eat dog world! | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2173 | Listen, you are still my favorite son! | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2174 | He may be an uppity SOB, but he is still your brother. | 1.2842 | 0.05111 | 95 | 70 | 23 | 2 |
2175 | The dog wants to take you for a walk | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2176 | Come on, Riley, shake. Shake! Who's a good boy! | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2177 | We don’t love Fauntleroy more than you, he’s just a very good dog. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2178 | No reason to be angry just because you're both named Roscoe. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2179 | Don't worry. If you're a good boy, you too will have your day. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2180 | This is why we are only celebrating Bandit's obedience school graduation today... | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2181 | Sweety, why can't you be like your little brother? | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 76 | 13 | 6 |
2182 | Therapy isn't bad. Look at Fido - after a few sessions he's not only comfortable with his "true" self, he fetches his own clothing too! | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2183 | Don't be upset. You don't have to wear shorts, and you wanted the dog in the first place. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2184 | It's a cultural thing, son. Now reciprocate the butt sniff. | 1.2842 | 0.06109 | 95 | 75 | 13 | 7 |
2185 | Well, you wanted a little brother. | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2186 | The dog graduated from Obedience School, and so can you. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2187 | Remember son, he's learned to shake and make up | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2188 | When you finish obedience school you can have a suit as well...now sit! | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2189 | Jimmy, don't make fun of you're brother, He is fully trained" | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2190 | Having 2 good boys gives me an extra tax deduction! | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2191 | Don't worry Timmy! If you're a good boy, maybe next year I'll bring you to "take your son to work" day. | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2192 | Don't sulk. He's just my best friend. | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2193 | It's okay, son. Next year you might win best in show. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2194 | Meet Ralph, your new best dressed friend. | 1.2842 | 0.06109 | 95 | 75 | 13 | 7 |
2195 | Bobbie, great news! You and Buster are going to be in the same obedience training class. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2196 | While we home schooled you, guess who really paid attention. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2197 | But this is the only little brother I could adopt for you. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2198 | Good boy, Donald. When you grow up you will make a good President. | 1.2842 | 0.06290 | 95 | 76 | 11 | 8 |
2199 | Remember how we did your thing last weekend? This weekend we’re gonna sniff the kitty litter, okay? | 1.2842 | 0.06290 | 95 | 76 | 11 | 8 |
2200 | I guess it is true what they say a man is a dogs best friend. I guess you are just a friend to me, son. | 1.2842 | 0.04771 | 95 | 76 | 14 | 5 |
2201 | Stop pouting we’ve got to hurry and get Harold to his acting lessons. | 1.2842 | 0.04887 | 95 | 69 | 25 | 1 |
2202 | Don’t worry, Jimmy. One day you’ll be as smart as Fido. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2203 | The thing is, he’s cuter than you AND he doesn’t sass back. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2204 | Dad with the dog he said he didn’t want | 1.2842 | 0.06465 | 95 | 77 | 9 | 9 |
2205 | David, there is nothing wrong with hand-me-downs. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2206 | . Yes he's adopted but he's still your real brother. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2207 | Your school might be closed, but Miss Muffy’s School for Manners is open! | 1.2842 | 0.04887 | 95 | 69 | 25 | 1 |
2208 | Chin up, Bobbie. When you learn to stop chasing cars, you can go to school like Mr. Wiggles here, too. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2209 | Maybe if you didn’t crap all over the house, you could come to Olive Garden too. Now be a good boy and fetch Carlisle’s silk dinner leash. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2210 | But he’s wearing MY favorite outfit, dad | 1.2842 | 0.05219 | 95 | 73 | 18 | 4 |
2211 | AND he’s toilet trained. What have you done lately? | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2212 | Based on your 2020 distance learning performance, your mother and I have decided to invest your future college tuition in obedience school instead. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2213 | Oh C’mon now. Being different is a good thing. Let’s shake hands. | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2214 | I thought i was your favourite good boy | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2215 | Look at him. Now, SIT! | 1.2842 | 0.05532 | 95 | 72 | 19 | 4 |
2216 | Yes, he’s my best friend, he’s man’s best friend, but you’ll always be my little buddy. | 1.2842 | 0.05923 | 95 | 74 | 15 | 6 |
2217 | It’s not that we don’t LOVE you son, he just gets more LIKES” | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2218 | don’t worry son, you can teach your brother how to dress himself and he can teach you how to chase after the mailman. It’ll be fun! | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2219 | He doesn’t love the hand me downs either, son, but we he lives with it | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2220 | I love all my litter equally. | 1.2828 | 0.05185 | 99 | 73 | 22 | 3 |
2221 | The dog isn’t my favourite Jimmy, he’s just more willing to wear the suit. | 1.2828 | 0.04771 | 99 | 72 | 26 | 1 |
2222 | If you straighten up, you'll get a treat too! | 1.2828 | 0.05283 | 99 | 77 | 17 | 5 |
2223 | You can wear the uniform when you get accepted to obedience school | 1.2826 | 0.06245 | 92 | 73 | 12 | 7 |
2224 | Johnny, our friends never had kids so this is the best playdate we can offer. | 1.2826 | 0.06051 | 92 | 72 | 14 | 6 |
2225 | ...C'mon Bobby...There called a "hand -me-down". | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2226 | I'll get you and your brother a pet for Christmas next year. | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2227 | Don't worry, Billy, we found a nice family on a farm who'll take you in" | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2228 | Come on, Freddie. Let's try without the leash today. See how Butch here does it? | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2229 | Come on, boy. Come on. It's time to walk the boy. Whose a good boy? Whose a good boy? | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2230 | It's not a competition Timmy but he is only two and already has his pet-degree | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2231 | Look! I know it's unfair, but you're not allowed to pee on the fire hydrant. | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2232 | I'll get you nice clothes too ... when you show the same degree of loyalty. | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2233 | He IS my best friend, but you're both good boys | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2234 | With a bit of training, I'm sure you'll fit right into our family. | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2235 | Don’t be angry, you know he was my first child! | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2236 | Come on Donny, you can't win all the time! | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2237 | Remember, Rover: a child is not just for Christmas. | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2238 | When you learn to heel, Bobby, then you’ll get a new suit too. | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2239 | He was first but we love you too | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2240 | He'll be back to play after we get a little boost in our stimulus check | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2241 | Why don't you let Tyrell show you how to do a trick? | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2242 | Come on Jackson! Chase your tail for just a little while, and then you can pick the next game! | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2243 | You don’t have to dress like Woof-Woof. Just let him teach you coding. | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2244 | Don't be upset. Once upon a time they called this "putting on the dog." Now it's just another Instagram put-on. | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2245 | Ok-then he’ll be the ring bearer and you’ll go to the kennel. | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2246 | Charles, your mother has already acquitted me of this peccadillo... It's your turn to forgive me. | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2247 | It's a question of attitude, not difference. | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2248 | And now, Billy, it’s your turn to act like a little dog!” | 1.2826 | 0.05202 | 92 | 68 | 22 | 2 |
2249 | Now be a good boy and give me your paw. | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2250 | Well sometimes you can be a condescending little bitch too. | 1.2826 | 0.06245 | 92 | 73 | 12 | 7 |
2251 | Come on, now. Look what Cotillion did for Doxy. | 1.2826 | 0.04967 | 92 | 67 | 24 | 1 |
2252 | if you had remembered that bag, you wouldn't have to carry it in your hand | 1.2826 | 0.06245 | 92 | 73 | 12 | 7 |
2253 | Now, Tommy, it wasn't your mother I was calling a bitch. | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2254 | Now, let's have a 'Big Boy' face for Buster's success on YouTube. | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2255 | I told you that you have to wear tails if you go to the black tie party | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2256 | No worries. Your new little brother doesn't like broccoli or asparagus. | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2257 | First you put him in clothes. Then he's standing upright. What's next, is he getting the new PS5? | 1.2826 | 0.05202 | 92 | 68 | 22 | 2 |
2258 | If you stop pouting you can be my second best friend. | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2259 | You have to learn to convince everyone it's a person if you hope to be president one day. | 1.2826 | 0.06051 | 92 | 72 | 14 | 6 |
2260 | I'm sorry. They say you're just not obedience school material. | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2261 | Study hard enough and you too could get into Boston Latin. | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2262 | Aw, cheer up, you beat the cat! | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2263 | ok, I promise mom won't give her your shoes too | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2264 | How about you apologize for calling him "stupid looking" and "a phony pure bred." | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2265 | No! It's not that we love him more it's because he behaves better. | 1.2826 | 0.06051 | 92 | 72 | 14 | 6 |
2266 | I know but I could only afford a suit for one of you | 1.2826 | 0.05202 | 92 | 68 | 22 | 2 |
2267 | Meet your brother from a different mother. | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2268 | And that’s why he’s my best friend, and you’re not. | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2269 | I've been given this ultimatum before; I keep the dog. | 1.2826 | 0.06051 | 92 | 72 | 14 | 6 |
2270 | Stop it. We need the $1800 to help cover the $12,000 we owe in rent. | 1.2826 | 0.06245 | 92 | 73 | 12 | 7 |
2271 | Son, all millenials are getting them. Pets and plants are the new children. | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2272 | Just because you're adopted doesn't mean we love you any less. | 1.2826 | 0.05202 | 92 | 68 | 22 | 2 |
2273 | Don’t fuss. You will get his hand-me-downs. | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2274 | You’ll have more followers one day, keep your chin up! | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2275 | Well, what do you know? The dog really DOES behave better than you!" | 1.2826 | 0.05426 | 92 | 69 | 20 | 3 |
2276 | Sorry Mikey, I only brought dog treats. | 1.2826 | 0.05850 | 92 | 71 | 16 | 5 |
2277 | It's okay Timmy, just shake his paw | 1.2816 | 0.05054 | 103 | 77 | 23 | 3 |
2278 | Don’t be sad! You’ll get to wear the nice clothes when you learn to play dead | 1.2816 | 0.05758 | 103 | 81 | 15 | 7 |
2279 | You know I love you both equally. | 1.2812 | 0.05278 | 96 | 72 | 21 | 3 |
2280 | Hey, those pants don't fit you anymore. | 1.2812 | 0.05482 | 96 | 73 | 19 | 4 |
2281 | Dress for the job you want, son | 1.2812 | 0.05678 | 96 | 74 | 17 | 5 |
2282 | This is how a good boy behaves. | 1.2812 | 0.05678 | 96 | 74 | 17 | 5 |
2283 | No, son, we cannot just ‘bring him back.’ | 1.2809 | 0.05759 | 89 | 68 | 17 | 4 |
2284 | Don't be angry Son, all he knows are simple tricks. | 1.2805 | 0.05827 | 82 | 62 | 17 | 3 |
2285 | Don't worry – you're next in line for obedience school. | 1.2800 | 0.05519 | 100 | 77 | 18 | 5 |
2286 | Hey kiddo, we will get your special treat next! | 1.2796 | 0.05154 | 93 | 69 | 22 | 2 |
2287 | Now I want you to be a good sport and share your balls with him | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2288 | He's here to teach you obedience. | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2289 | We love you less now. | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2290 | Remember when I told you that somebody you'd get your very own brother? | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2291 | I'm sure he'll want to play fetch tomorrow. | 1.2796 | 0.05154 | 93 | 69 | 22 | 2 |
2292 | You'll be smarter than him one day Tommy. | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2293 | But you can't wear a dog collar -- we're Presbyterian. | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2294 | Come on - you know I love you as much as Rover. HE didn't get to where he is today by being a sourpuss. | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2295 | Come on, Billy. Lots of families adopt. | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2296 | Cheer up. One day you’ll get potty trained and graduate. | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2297 | Daddy loves you almost as much. | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2298 | You promised you'd go to Snuggle's piano recital. | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2299 | You will be able to wear a suit too when you grow up." | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2300 | Honestly, now that Ruffles has agreed to wear pants I’m not sure there’s a place for you here any longer. | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2301 | Trying to hump you is just how he lets you know he loves you. | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2302 | of course I love you more; he's just my best friend | 1.2796 | 0.05154 | 93 | 69 | 22 | 2 |
2303 | Look Jack, I'm sorry Mr. Wiggles had an accident in your room, but he's an award winning pedigree and you can't even read! | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2304 | But honey, it’s your turn to fetch. | 1.2796 | 0.05154 | 93 | 69 | 22 | 2 |
2305 | Don’t worry bud, I’ll take you to Disney when you master your times tables too | 1.2796 | 0.06185 | 93 | 74 | 12 | 7 |
2306 | Now,now, you can play with your real human friends once herd immunity is achieved. | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2307 | Today is McHenry Rover Charles the Second’s birthday. When it’s your birthday, we’ll go where you want to go, Craig. | 1.2796 | 0.05154 | 93 | 69 | 22 | 2 |
2308 | I don't love him more,I just love him in a different way ! | 1.2796 | 0.04922 | 93 | 68 | 24 | 1 |
2309 | Oh Timmy, you're not even Man's Best Son. | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2310 | Just because your name is Donald, doesn't mean you can kick the dog | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2311 | Why can't you be a good boy like Rover? | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2312 | Come along, son, now it’s your turn to go to obedience school. | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2313 | Come on, pal. You'll be tip-toeing in no time. | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2314 | If you had a front-line leadership position like his, I'd get you a suit, too. | 1.2796 | 0.05993 | 93 | 73 | 14 | 6 |
2315 | Look at Fido--he's being a good boy! | 1.2796 | 0.05993 | 93 | 73 | 14 | 6 |
2316 | But, Donald, you chose him to be your Vice-President. | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2317 | Now, now. He doesn’t object to pretending to be my son, and in time you won’t either. | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2318 | C'mon little buddy. You're special too. | 1.2796 | 0.05154 | 93 | 69 | 22 | 2 |
2319 | You bought HIM this year's Versace!? | 1.2796 | 0.05993 | 93 | 73 | 14 | 6 |
2320 | No one ever said boy was a man's best friend | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2321 | You should have subscribed to his style tips. | 1.2796 | 0.04922 | 93 | 68 | 24 | 1 |
2322 | Now stop being a little bitch like your sister. | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2323 | Now Danny, if you don't play nice with your cousin he'll bite, OK? He's from Germany. | 1.2796 | 0.05993 | 93 | 73 | 14 | 6 |
2324 | Maybe if you didn't piss your pants so much, we would mock you less | 1.2796 | 0.06185 | 93 | 74 | 12 | 7 |
2325 | Jimmy don’t be upset, our dog has border collie genes. | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2326 | Who's a Good boy? Now, who's a good boy? | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2327 | Look at it this way, at least you’re out of knickers. | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 74 | 12 | 6 |
2328 | Don't call your stepmom a bitch. | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2329 | Stop barking at your brother | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2330 | No, you cannot let your tail hangout like Helmut! | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2331 | It’s a great life, son! Just ask Jasper! I wish I’d gotten neutered when I was your age! | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2332 | What? He's the one who brings home the bacon, Timmy! | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2333 | You’re the bad boy, HE’S the good boy. | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2334 | Don’t be mad. You don’t have to get dressed up for obedience school. | 1.2796 | 0.05154 | 93 | 69 | 22 | 2 |
2335 | It’s ok Teddy, you can fetch the next one. | 1.2796 | 0.05376 | 93 | 70 | 20 | 3 |
2336 | Now apologize for calling your big brother “just a dog.” | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2337 | Silly Billy, people don’t use the bathroom outside | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2338 | What? Don’t be silly. Of course I don’t love you equally. | 1.2796 | 0.05590 | 93 | 71 | 18 | 4 |
2339 | Sorry to break it to you like this: you were adopted. | 1.2796 | 0.05154 | 93 | 69 | 22 | 2 |
2340 | Son, he IS your brother - you’ve got to take turns with the dress clothes!! | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2341 | When are you going to start acting more like your brother? | 1.2796 | 0.05795 | 93 | 72 | 16 | 5 |
2342 | Yes it was your suit, but it fits him so much better. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2343 | but Spike, Percy responded to every command! | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2344 | Remember how you used dress for school? Your friend Fido is here to remind you. | 1.2788 | 0.05372 | 104 | 80 | 19 | 5 |
2345 | Jimmy, the suit is too small for you now. | 1.2788 | 0.05195 | 104 | 79 | 21 | 4 |
2346 | Son meet our new therapy dog, Scooter! | 1.2788 | 0.04625 | 104 | 76 | 27 | 1 |
2347 | I'm sorry your sister bit you but it's just her natural instinct. | 1.2788 | 0.05543 | 104 | 81 | 17 | 6 |
2348 | When you learn to obey, you get your room back. | 1.2784 | 0.05231 | 97 | 73 | 21 | 3 |
2349 | Just because he is a good boy doesn't mean he is a great boy. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2350 | We are sending Rocky to Law school unless you want to grab my hand and walk back home. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2351 | It’ll be alright buddy, we will take your suit off the dog right after the Christmas card photo. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2352 | You need to show more respect Max - in dog years he just became your older brother." | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2353 | Why can’t you be more like your brother, Spot? | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2354 | Well, maybe you could try to be a good boy, too. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2355 | Yes, he's a dog, but he was here first. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2356 | I know you loved it, but, you've outgrown the suit. It's your little brother's turn now. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2357 | Hey hey...obedience school is a private education and look what it did for your brother. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2358 | Now you BOTH have to keep your clothes on when we go to the store. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2359 | Look at it this way--you're not a son-of-a-bitch! | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2360 | Come on Billy, he let you fetch his stick. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2361 | Dog-on it, it is HUMANLY possible to love you both the same! | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2362 | Hey, it could be worse. You could be wearing HIS hand-me-downs. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2363 | He is allowed to say that word because his mother is one. | 1.2778 | 0.06126 | 90 | 71 | 13 | 6 |
2364 | When you are house trained, you can have nice clothes, too. | 1.2778 | 0.05247 | 90 | 67 | 21 | 2 |
2365 | I'd be flattered if someone thought I was twins with Rover! | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2366 | When you're 30 you can wear a suit too. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2367 | Just because you were rescued doesn't mean we love you any less. | 1.2778 | 0.05004 | 90 | 66 | 23 | 1 |
2368 | Now, Johnny, Artemis doesn’t care that you ate his homework again, but I say it’s got to stop. | 1.2778 | 0.05247 | 90 | 67 | 21 | 2 |
2369 | Billy, I know you don't like crapping in the yard and eating from bowls on the floor but everyone in this family is equal | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2370 | And if you learn to retrieve you can dress up like this too. | 1.2778 | 0.05247 | 90 | 67 | 21 | 2 |
2371 | It's too small for you anyway and besides its not your color. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2372 | But you said you wanted a puppy! | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2373 | Listen little man, if buddy here is willing to go fetch random things for me, I think you can too. | 1.2778 | 0.05247 | 90 | 67 | 21 | 2 |
2374 | It's official!!! Animals are now people! | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2375 | You’re my real “Best Friend” | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2376 | The 2 of you need to shake hands! | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2377 | Come on, Donald. Stop your temper tantrump and start abidening by the rules like Joe here. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2378 | I know how you must feel, but who’s a good boy? | 1.2778 | 0.05247 | 90 | 67 | 21 | 2 |
2379 | Be nice to your new brother, Buddy | 1.2778 | 0.05247 | 90 | 67 | 21 | 2 |
2380 | That sounded very speciesist. You don't want to go on record as a speciesist, do you Tommy? | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2381 | He loved obedience school. Maybe you should give it a try. | 1.2778 | 0.05247 | 90 | 67 | 21 | 2 |
2382 | Don’t worry buddy, you can be man’s second best friend. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2383 | It's just that your brother is species fluid | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2384 | I only have room in my life for one best friend. | 1.2778 | 0.06126 | 90 | 71 | 13 | 6 |
2385 | Just because he has a college fund and you don't is no reason to be mad. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2386 | That’s not true, son. I love you just as much. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2387 | Be grateful you're too big for hand-me-downs. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2388 | No, we can't go the flea market today. You know that your brother would be terrierfied to go there! | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2389 | Son, I know this is your favorite outfit, but there's going to be a dog at the White House again and we need to let him celebrate however he wants to. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2390 | Son, I hate to tell you this but you are adopted. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2391 | Mr. Fauntlerory will apologize for stealing your Twinkie if you apologize for lighting a fire-cracker in his hind end. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2392 | I’m going to tell him that he’s adopted! | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2393 | Don't worry; when YOU finish obedience school, you'll get a new suit, too. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2394 | Oh look at that, they fit better on your big brother. | 1.2778 | 0.06126 | 90 | 71 | 13 | 6 |
2395 | And your new friend already wears "big boy" pants! | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2396 | Not your DNA Daddy.. Sorry... | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2397 | Wow, potty training and dressing herself! What can you do? | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2398 | ...but you said you wanted a dog and a baby brother... | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2399 | Don’t be jealous, The suit is from the Salvation Army. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2400 | So what he's wearing your fancy clothes? It's not like you're graduating kindergarten anytime soon. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2401 | Why, of course neither of you is adopted. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2402 | Jimmy, you'll always be son. But you'll never be my best friend. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2403 | How does ‘man’s second-best friend’ sound? | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2404 | Cheer up, he'll be done with your suit as soon as the show is over. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2405 | Your adopted sister is here to stay...and lay down...and roll over. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2406 | They are out of tails, but how about a bicycle? | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2407 | Unlike you he knows how to be a good boy. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2408 | And if you can't control your behavior, we'll have to send you to obedience school like we did with Baxter here. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2409 | He's not going to school with you, just a little misunderstanding when I mentioned we'd be boarding him. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2410 | Hey, it happens. I'll hose off those Air Jordans and bring out your old sneakers | 1.2778 | 0.05247 | 90 | 67 | 21 | 2 |
2411 | I hate to break it to you, but you’re not twins. He was adopted. | 1.2778 | 0.05004 | 90 | 66 | 23 | 1 |
2412 | If Rover can dress up for math class on Zoom, you can too. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2413 | Go be friendly and sniff his backside too. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2414 | Hold your pee till we get home, outside is his toilet, not yours! | 1.2778 | 0.05004 | 90 | 66 | 23 | 1 |
2415 | Once you quit playing XBOX and become more socialized like Fred here, then you can go back to school with your friends. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2416 | He is our favorite, but don't worry, you will get all the chocolate” | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2417 | Son, I no longer relate to human beings. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2418 | Dad, I still think you should be asking more questions when Mommy goes to dog park. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2419 | Yes, George, you’re older, but Pepper‘s instagram channel has way more followers than yours and pays all our bills. So he gets the bigger room in the new house. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2420 | It *IS* fair, because the clothes no longer fit you and I love him more. See? | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2421 | I know it’s hard to accept, Tommy, but yes — mom and I did see you as the practice puppy. | 1.2778 | 0.05127 | 90 | 69 | 18 | 3 |
2422 | You’ll love the new JCrew ensemble I have in store for you, too, junior! | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2423 | Well, technically yes he is. He’s also the son of me. By adoption. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2424 | There can be only one good boy in the family. | 1.2778 | 0.05247 | 90 | 67 | 21 | 2 |
2425 | It was your turn to pick last week. We're going to the dog park because it's Woofbert's request. | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2426 | Just bottle up that anger, it’s the only thing you can do that he can’t! | 1.2778 | 0.05004 | 90 | 66 | 23 | 1 |
2427 | Okay, if we quietly tip-toe into 2021, maybe 2020 won’t follow us. | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2428 | We wish we could afford to send you both but don’t worry, the public school system is excellent here, Johnny” | 1.2778 | 0.05480 | 90 | 68 | 19 | 3 |
2429 | Now son, the election is over - Major gets the twitter account | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2430 | And now, you....sit! | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2431 | Now, be a good boy like Benji. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2432 | You should try and be more like your little brother" | 1.2778 | 0.05918 | 90 | 70 | 15 | 5 |
2433 | See, your brother wants to go to the park. | 1.2778 | 0.05703 | 90 | 69 | 17 | 4 |
2434 | Now Johnny, the elite obedience school admissions were based on relative qualifications. | 1.2772 | 0.05472 | 101 | 78 | 18 | 5 |
2435 | You can’t punch your brother just because he growled at you. | 1.2771 | 0.05766 | 83 | 63 | 17 | 3 |
2436 | Yes, he'll always be able to bark. | 1.2771 | 0.05766 | 83 | 63 | 17 | 3 |
2437 | I promise you when you are a grownup you might understand. | 1.2768 | 0.05702 | 112 | 90 | 13 | 9 |
2438 | Party Dress vs. Daily Look | 1.2766 | 0.05538 | 94 | 72 | 18 | 4 |
2439 | Of course, I love you as just much as Bowser, now run and fetch that stick again. | 1.2766 | 0.05538 | 94 | 72 | 18 | 4 |
2440 | When you learn "Sit!" you can have nice clothes. | 1.2766 | 0.05538 | 94 | 72 | 18 | 4 |
2441 | That problems’s been solved, Henry’s wearing a diaper. | 1.2766 | 0.05538 | 94 | 72 | 18 | 4 |
2442 | Stop complaining. You'll look good in a dog collar, and you can pee anywhere you like. | 1.2766 | 0.05538 | 94 | 72 | 18 | 4 |
2443 | We love you both the same, but we like him a lot more | 1.2766 | 0.05936 | 94 | 74 | 14 | 6 |
2444 | The bitch set me up.” | 1.2766 | 0.05936 | 94 | 74 | 14 | 6 |
2445 | No - cloning isn’t perfect yet | 1.2766 | 0.05936 | 94 | 74 | 14 | 6 |
2446 | Who's dressed like a little bitch, now? | 1.2766 | 0.05936 | 94 | 74 | 14 | 6 |
2447 | He passed obedience training, that's why. | 1.2766 | 0.05741 | 94 | 73 | 16 | 5 |
2448 | Obedience school might be just the thing for you too! | 1.2766 | 0.05327 | 94 | 71 | 20 | 3 |
2449 | your brother has feelings too | 1.2766 | 0.05538 | 94 | 72 | 18 | 4 |
2450 | I’m sorry Jimmy, but you and your brother need to get tested again, there’s a new strain going around...COVID-K9-teen. | 1.2766 | 0.05936 | 94 | 74 | 14 | 6 |
2451 | Turns out home-schooling the dog is a breeze | 1.2766 | 0.05327 | 94 | 71 | 20 | 3 |
2452 | I don't HAVE a favorite, Tommy! | 1.2766 | 0.05327 | 94 | 71 | 20 | 3 |
2453 | Online school is hard, buddy, but we can only afford a tutor for one of you. | 1.2766 | 0.05108 | 94 | 70 | 22 | 2 |
2454 | If Lucy can get into a prestigious school in New York City, so can you. You just have to pretend you’re someone you’re not. | 1.2747 | 0.06066 | 91 | 72 | 13 | 6 |
2455 | Don't be jealous, he's just my FUR baby. You're my skin baby. | 1.2747 | 0.05428 | 91 | 69 | 19 | 3 |
2456 | You'd be surprised which one of you is my real son. | 1.2747 | 0.06264 | 91 | 73 | 11 | 7 |
2457 | I know you don't want to go to Obedience School, but look what it did for Bartholomew. | 1.2747 | 0.05649 | 91 | 70 | 17 | 4 |
2458 | I bought you AND the boy matching outfits. | 1.2747 | 0.05861 | 91 | 71 | 15 | 5 |
2459 | If you wanted us to buy you nice clothes, you should have been more respectful with your mask, like your brother was. | 1.2747 | 0.05428 | 91 | 69 | 19 | 3 |
2460 | Im your son, not him | 1.2747 | 0.04958 | 91 | 67 | 23 | 1 |
2461 | Son, this is Vanessa! We met online at OkStupid! | 1.2747 | 0.06264 | 91 | 73 | 11 | 7 |
2462 | Okay I will put ice cubes on your water dish | 1.2745 | 0.05601 | 102 | 80 | 16 | 6 |
2463 | Now, now don't pout Fredrick, I haven't even explained how he's your step-brother yet. | 1.2737 | 0.05687 | 95 | 74 | 16 | 5 |
2464 | I know your sister is a bitch, but we still love her. | 1.2737 | 0.05881 | 95 | 75 | 14 | 6 |
2465 | Yes,but you can pee with both feet on the ground. | 1.2737 | 0.05687 | 95 | 74 | 16 | 5 |
2466 | I know you're mad Billy, but you know mom and I have told you our priorities have changed in quarantine | 1.2737 | 0.05881 | 95 | 75 | 14 | 6 |
2467 | Well Fido can't go to school with you but at least he can wear the outfit Granny picked out for your first day! | 1.2737 | 0.05062 | 95 | 71 | 22 | 2 |
2468 | You don't have to give the stick back either! | 1.2737 | 0.05687 | 95 | 74 | 16 | 5 |
2469 | What can I say, your stepmom’s a bitch. | 1.2737 | 0.05279 | 95 | 72 | 20 | 3 |
2470 | Good boy! Now give me your paw and let's go for a walk! | 1.2737 | 0.05279 | 95 | 72 | 20 | 3 |
2471 | We don’t make those kind of distinctions in this family. | 1.2737 | 0.05487 | 95 | 73 | 18 | 4 |
2472 | Would you rather not ask these questions and just play fetch! | 1.2737 | 0.05279 | 95 | 72 | 20 | 3 |
2473 | You're both good boys! | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2474 | Now listen Timmy, no chewing on furniture or running after cars while your new friend is here.” | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2475 | Sniffing is their way of saying hello. | 1.2727 | 0.05041 | 88 | 65 | 22 | 1 |
2476 | I don't want to hear anymore about you being the only child. | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2477 | Sorry son but kids can’t go to obedience school. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2478 | It’s ok you’re adopted too. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2479 | I brought a plastic bag in case you have to go. | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2480 | 'Trust me, dressing up for Grandma's visit will get you something a lot better than a dog biscuit." | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2481 | Sit, David. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2482 | Woofie's not the only one who's adopted. | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2483 | Just because he's the top dog doesn't give you the right to bitch about it. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2484 | Well, you said you didn't want a little sister. | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2485 | I'm sorry, barking will not get you more attention. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2486 | J Crew turned into a pet rescue and look what I got! | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2487 | I'm sorry Spot is smarter than you at your age | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2488 | What are you gonna do, kid? Bite me? | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2489 | He can't help being a good boy, it's in his pedigree. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2490 | I love you both as much, just differently. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2491 | Come on,now. Shake his paw. It was a fair fight. He just has a lower center of gravity than you. | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2492 | You’ll like him better as a brother than a pet. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2493 | Well, in dog years, he is older than you. | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2494 | You can have ice cream when you learn to fetch my slippers. | 1.2727 | 0.05337 | 99 | 76 | 19 | 4 |
2495 | Look how nicely your brother is behaving.... | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2496 | Now who's happy to have that silly cone off of their head? | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2497 | Now Tommy play nice. He’s all bark and no bite. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2498 | I told you not to leave treats in your coat pockets,Now look what happened. | 1.2727 | 0.05710 | 99 | 78 | 15 | 6 |
2499 | Come on, you’re still the pick of the litter. | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2500 | You're just imagining that Bailey's getting more attention! | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2501 | You're lucky i'm not using a leash | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2502 | When you're grown up he'll be your best friend, too. | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2503 | Get your leash. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2504 | Pandemic version of play date 2020 | 1.2727 | 0.05710 | 99 | 78 | 15 | 6 |
2505 | He says fetch is so been there done that. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2506 | Sorry son, he's 'man's best friend,' not 'kid's best friend' | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2507 | When you learn how to jump through the hoop then you can get ice cream. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2508 | You don't have to bark if you don't want to | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2509 | Frisky needs to use your iPad for his remote learning too. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2510 | Remember how I said that 2021 would be a different year? | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2511 | Remember you are the one who wanted a puppy. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2512 | Actually, kiddo, you’re adopted. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2513 | If you don’t want to hold my hand, I’ll have to get the leash. | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2514 | He’s got better clothes because he has to go to school. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2515 | Come on son. You didn't like school anyway. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2516 | Come meet your obedience teacher. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2517 | With those fancy duds, I can't ask him to roll over. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2518 | He’s only a puppy.Hence the new trick | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2519 | What's this about a bone to pick? | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2520 | But he’ll never steal your girlfriend. | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2521 | You too could be a good boy! | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2522 | C'mon, son, you'll love it! Look what kindergarten did for Muffy. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2523 | But sweetie, you know he was better at Stay! | 1.2727 | 0.06203 | 88 | 70 | 12 | 6 |
2524 | Mr. Jones would never eat your homework, dear. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2525 | Let’s go meet your new baby sister! | 1.2727 | 0.06203 | 88 | 70 | 12 | 6 |
2526 | Sorry, he can catch and return the ball better than you, but you are so much better at bat that we're making you the designated hitter! | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2527 | You thought your yo- yo trick was cool, but this is how you really walk the dog. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2528 | Dogginit Buster—why can’t you behave more like your litter brothers and sisters? | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2529 | Look, Junior. He's not as needy as you. And he's trained. | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2530 | I promise we'll have your suit dry cleaned. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2531 | You’re the adopted one! | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2532 | See Spot obey. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2533 | Don't worry, you're still the top dog. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2534 | You said you wanted a baby brother. | 1.2727 | 0.05041 | 88 | 65 | 22 | 1 |
2535 | Now now Joshua, what do we say when we call our playmate a son of a bitch? | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2536 | Mom's such a bitch! | 1.2727 | 0.06610 | 88 | 72 | 8 | 8 |
2537 | Yes, you were adopted. | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2538 | No, mom and dad don’t love your brother more | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2539 | He finished obedience school. You can too. | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2540 | Because of the unusual relationship with their family dog, Donald despised dogs in later life. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2541 | But this is how I can give you a baby brother after mommy left. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2542 | Who's a good boy? That's right, he's a good boy. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2543 | If Rocky wins the contest, you get a new tricycle! | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2544 | Hey now, no one ever said life is fair! | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2545 | If Spot can learn to do his business outside, you can use the potty like a big boy. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2546 | Mommy and I exchanged your cool guns for a doggy suit for chippy!! | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2547 | No you can’t be called Fido. HE’S Fido. | 1.2727 | 0.05527 | 99 | 77 | 17 | 5 |
2548 | Man's best dressed friend. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2549 | No,Peter, I'm not going to make you dress up like Fido! | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2550 | Daddy, boy, dog! | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2551 | You could learn a lot from your dog. " Sit... Stay...QUIET! " | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2552 | Your insult didn't land because 'bitch' also means 'female dog.'" | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2553 | I promise. Next time you will get your turn to sleep in the kennel. | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2554 | You’ll understand when you have your own. | 1.2727 | 0.06203 | 88 | 70 | 12 | 6 |
2555 | Yeah, yeah, he walks on two feet but has four. Big deal. You didn't fall off your trike yesterday, that was very good! | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2556 | And when you’re a good boy, you can get a treat too. | 1.2727 | 0.05527 | 99 | 77 | 17 | 5 |
2557 | Why must I always have his hand-me-downs?” | 1.2727 | 0.06203 | 88 | 70 | 12 | 6 |
2558 | You have school from K-12. He's only K-9. | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2559 | Remember who pays for your PS5, Timmy. We wouldn’t have our reality show without a talking dog. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2560 | Come on Timmy. Do you want to go for a walk? | 1.2727 | 0.06203 | 88 | 70 | 12 | 6 |
2561 | You can sleep inside again when *you’re* a good boy, okay?” | 1.2727 | 0.05041 | 88 | 65 | 22 | 1 |
2562 | Somebody is not getting a treat cookie | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2563 | Who rescued who? | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2564 | Son, just look at Sparkles. Look how friggin psyched he is. Now THAT'S the confidence a school uniform brings you. You're gonna be--how do you kids say--cool af! | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2565 | If you wear the matching suit, you don’t need to sit through the whole family Zoom call | 1.2727 | 0.05988 | 88 | 69 | 14 | 5 |
2566 | I know he gets more toys but look at how cute he is | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2567 | He is just more of a good boy than you are. | 1.2727 | 0.05766 | 88 | 68 | 16 | 4 |
2568 | You will understand when you are my age | 1.2727 | 0.05535 | 88 | 67 | 18 | 3 |
2569 | stop crying or no more treats for you. | 1.2727 | 0.06410 | 88 | 71 | 10 | 7 |
2570 | now THIS is what a good boy looks like | 1.2727 | 0.05294 | 88 | 66 | 20 | 2 |
2571 | Donny, behave or you will go to French obedience school with your brother. | 1.2717 | 0.04913 | 92 | 73 | 15 | 4 |
2572 | why did you call your sister a bitch??? | 1.2717 | 0.05595 | 92 | 71 | 17 | 4 |
2573 | He wants to say he's sorry for eating you're pet mouse. | 1.2717 | 0.05377 | 92 | 70 | 19 | 3 |
2574 | He says you're not properly attired to play fetch, Tommy. | 1.2717 | 0.05150 | 92 | 69 | 21 | 2 |
2575 | Well Johny, we can only afford to send one of you to a private school and quite frankly Rex is showing more promise. | 1.2717 | 0.05377 | 92 | 70 | 19 | 3 |
2576 | Come on now, apologize and sniff butts. | 1.2717 | 0.05150 | 92 | 69 | 21 | 2 |
2577 | He's better behaved, so he gets to wear the suit and you get to wear your scruffies. | 1.2717 | 0.05595 | 92 | 71 | 17 | 4 |
2578 | You're gonna love obedience school as much as your brother. | 1.2717 | 0.05804 | 92 | 72 | 15 | 5 |
2579 | Don't worry. The public schools here are great! | 1.2717 | 0.05377 | 92 | 70 | 19 | 3 |
2580 | Believe me, I wish we could send you off to obedience school too. | 1.2716 | 0.05830 | 81 | 62 | 16 | 3 |
2581 | Obedience school will be so much fun! | 1.2716 | 0.06089 | 81 | 63 | 14 | 4 |
2582 | You can wear the suit tomorrow. Deal? | 1.2716 | 0.06089 | 81 | 63 | 14 | 4 |
2583 | Son, say sorry to your brother for making fun of his outfit. | 1.2716 | 0.06337 | 81 | 64 | 12 | 5 |
2584 | But dad, why does he get to go out without wearing a mask? | 1.2716 | 0.05830 | 81 | 62 | 16 | 3 |
2585 | He’s getting the inheritance too | 1.2716 | 0.06089 | 81 | 63 | 14 | 4 |
2586 | I asked “who’s a good boy?” and he came back like this! | 1.2716 | 0.05559 | 81 | 61 | 18 | 2 |
2587 | Come on, Jimmy. You know he looks better in it than you do. | 1.2708 | 0.05231 | 96 | 73 | 20 | 3 |
2588 | He graduated from obedience school at the top of his class. | 1.2708 | 0.05437 | 96 | 74 | 18 | 4 |
2589 | Don't cry, I'm sure someone will adopt you when we drop you off at the pound. | 1.2706 | 0.05891 | 85 | 66 | 15 | 4 |
2590 | Yes, your Eddy Munster outfit had to be altered to accommodate his tail. | 1.2700 | 0.05096 | 100 | 76 | 21 | 3 |
2591 | This might be a good time to tell you you’re adopted. | 1.2700 | 0.05291 | 100 | 77 | 19 | 4 |
2592 | You said you wanted a little brother and Teddy is house broken | 1.2700 | 0.05660 | 100 | 79 | 15 | 6 |
2593 | You know how you wanted a dog and a new brother....? | 1.2697 | 0.05481 | 89 | 68 | 18 | 3 |
2594 | Don’t throw a tantrum! It’s only puppy love. | 1.2697 | 0.05481 | 89 | 68 | 18 | 3 |
2595 | Now Billy, everyone deserves a chance to be a biped. | 1.2697 | 0.05481 | 89 | 68 | 18 | 3 |
2596 | Don't make me get the leash. | 1.2697 | 0.05929 | 89 | 70 | 14 | 5 |
2597 | Well, two reasons. First, that little suit doesn’t fit you any more, and, B, I’m going a little stir crazy. | 1.2697 | 0.05709 | 89 | 69 | 16 | 4 |
2598 | Sorry, I’m moving, and they don’t allow kids. | 1.2697 | 0.05929 | 89 | 70 | 14 | 5 |
2599 | Look, just because he’s smarter, faster, stronger, and better-behaved, doesn’t mean you should be jealous: after all, you do have opposable thumbs... | 1.2697 | 0.05929 | 89 | 70 | 14 | 5 |
2600 | Why can’t you be a good dog like your brother? | 1.2697 | 0.05709 | 89 | 69 | 16 | 4 |
2601 | This is doggy style, son. | 1.2697 | 0.06140 | 89 | 71 | 12 | 6 |
2602 | Before you get angry, think about how weird this is *for him*. | 1.2697 | 0.05481 | 89 | 68 | 18 | 3 |
2603 | I am sure fido will let you wear the outfit sometimes | 1.2697 | 0.04993 | 89 | 66 | 22 | 1 |
2604 | I thought you wanted Mr. Bickels to take your place at Grandma's. | 1.2697 | 0.05709 | 89 | 69 | 16 | 4 |
2605 | Timmy, don't you think you should show Judy where you buried her bone? | 1.2697 | 0.05481 | 89 | 68 | 18 | 3 |
2606 | Who's a good boy? You are! Now, can you just heel for Daddy like Sparky is doing? | 1.2697 | 0.05243 | 89 | 67 | 20 | 2 |
2607 | Don't be sad - an overpriced, overprivileged private elementary school isn't for everyone. | 1.2697 | 0.05243 | 89 | 67 | 20 | 2 |
2608 | He love walks, why do i have to go? | 1.2697 | 0.05243 | 89 | 67 | 20 | 2 |
2609 | Petsmart doesn't have your size. | 1.2697 | 0.05243 | 89 | 67 | 20 | 2 |
2610 | Your lineage just isn't as stellar. | 1.2697 | 0.05481 | 89 | 68 | 18 | 3 |
2611 | Now let's see if you can learn to bark." | 1.2697 | 0.05709 | 89 | 69 | 16 | 4 |
2612 | No Bobby, not all twins are identical | 1.2697 | 0.05243 | 89 | 67 | 20 | 2 |
2613 | C'mon! You know you're my favorite human kid. | 1.2697 | 0.05596 | 89 | 70 | 13 | 5 |
2614 | And that’s how I met your mother | 1.2697 | 0.05243 | 89 | 67 | 20 | 2 |
2615 | You are still my second favorite son. | 1.2697 | 0.05709 | 89 | 69 | 16 | 4 |
2616 | Now Spotty, the dog obeys me, let me see you do the same. | 1.2697 | 0.05929 | 89 | 70 | 14 | 5 |
2617 | Sorry son. It turns out eating your homework does make her smarter. | 1.2697 | 0.05709 | 89 | 69 | 16 | 4 |
2618 | Its not my fault he learned how to walk first | 1.2697 | 0.05709 | 89 | 69 | 16 | 4 |
2619 | There’s no reason for you to think that we don’t love you the same | 1.2697 | 0.05709 | 89 | 69 | 16 | 4 |
2620 | But you will never have to share your chocolates. | 1.2697 | 0.05481 | 89 | 68 | 18 | 3 |
2621 | It’s either this or I put you both on leashes. | 1.2697 | 0.05709 | 89 | 69 | 16 | 4 |
2622 | Jerry you know WE think you’re cute, it’s just that Carter gets so many more likes on Instagram | 1.2697 | 0.05481 | 89 | 68 | 18 | 3 |
2623 | He is mans best friend. | 1.2697 | 0.05709 | 89 | 69 | 16 | 4 |
2624 | This is your partner, but I warn you, she dances like she has two left feet. | 1.2692 | 0.05962 | 78 | 60 | 15 | 3 |
2625 | Cheer up, you’ll always be daddy’s number 2. | 1.2688 | 0.05327 | 93 | 71 | 19 | 3 |
2626 | We agreed this week you go to Crate Escape and Tippy goes to Great Start DayCare. | 1.2688 | 0.05749 | 93 | 73 | 15 | 5 |
2627 | Be cool. You're still our baby, even if you don't have fur. | 1.2688 | 0.05749 | 93 | 73 | 15 | 5 |
2628 | He was playing with the bone first. | 1.2688 | 0.05103 | 93 | 70 | 21 | 2 |
2629 | Every suit has its day | 1.2688 | 0.05542 | 93 | 72 | 17 | 4 |
2630 | Life’s a bitch...and so is your sibling! | 1.2688 | 0.05949 | 93 | 74 | 13 | 6 |
2631 | It's time you learned to pick up your own shit. | 1.2680 | 0.05956 | 97 | 78 | 12 | 7 |
2632 | I don’t care what he says; you were not adopted, and we love you just as much as your brother. | 1.2680 | 0.05185 | 97 | 74 | 20 | 3 |
2633 | :" C'mon, let's go on a walk and see how the new diapers work out, for both of you ! " | 1.2680 | 0.05388 | 97 | 75 | 18 | 4 |
2634 | Now, the only other thing he needs from you are your shoes. | 1.2674 | 0.05830 | 86 | 67 | 15 | 4 |
2635 | You'll explain why we celebrate his birthday six times as often as yours when you're older | 1.2674 | 0.06060 | 86 | 68 | 13 | 5 |
2636 | You’re right, Johnny. Your stepmother is a bitch. | 1.2674 | 0.05830 | 86 | 67 | 15 | 4 |
2637 | Don’t be jealous—I only dress him like this so I don’t get you confused. | 1.2674 | 0.04801 | 86 | 63 | 23 | 0 |
2638 | Of course Mommy and Daddy love you as much as Mr. Scooter. | 1.2674 | 0.06060 | 86 | 68 | 13 | 5 |
2639 | What’s in your paw, be a good boy and drop it. | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2640 | Of course Mommy and I don't love Rufus more than you do! We just think he has more potential. | 1.2674 | 0.05078 | 86 | 64 | 21 | 1 |
2641 | Well, HE was a good boy! | 1.2674 | 0.05341 | 86 | 65 | 19 | 2 |
2642 | Son, during the stay at home period the family all agreed he is top dog. | 1.2674 | 0.05341 | 86 | 65 | 19 | 2 |
2643 | Who's a good boy? That's right, he is! | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2644 | You’ll get a suit next. | 1.2674 | 0.05830 | 86 | 67 | 15 | 4 |
2645 | I would give you fancy clothes also, if you would wear them. | 1.2674 | 0.05078 | 86 | 64 | 21 | 1 |
2646 | Now you get to dress like and pretend to be a dog! | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2647 | Yes, we're replacing you with the dog. We had to depend on someone after you told us you wanted to be and English major. | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2648 | I really think you should wear the leash. | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2649 | As soon as you catch a Frisbee in your teeth while sprinting, you’ll get a new suit too. | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2650 | Calling his mother a bitch may be technically correct but that doesn't mean you should disrespect her | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2651 | I told him he could wear your dress-up suite if he promised to undo the appropriate buttons whenever we come upon a hydrant. | 1.2674 | 0.05830 | 86 | 67 | 15 | 4 |
2652 | Next time, I'll let you dress yourself too! | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2653 | Timmy, meet your new schoolmate! And she's already potty-trained, so I'm hoping she can teach you a thing or two... | 1.2674 | 0.05078 | 86 | 64 | 21 | 1 |
2654 | Son, he didn't know it was your cookie. Look, he got all dressed up to make a formal apology! That's no tale!! | 1.2674 | 0.05830 | 86 | 67 | 15 | 4 |
2655 | Do some of the feelings you have toward your new brother have more to do with your stepmom? | 1.2674 | 0.05341 | 86 | 65 | 19 | 2 |
2656 | He can even bark in five languages! | 1.2674 | 0.05078 | 86 | 64 | 21 | 1 |
2657 | Don't cry....somebody has to go to public school. | 1.2674 | 0.06060 | 86 | 68 | 13 | 5 |
2658 | He has fur, so it’s okay for him to go barefoot and wear shorts in the wintertime. Besides, he doesn’t begrudge you your opposable thumbs, does he? | 1.2674 | 0.05830 | 86 | 67 | 15 | 4 |
2659 | HE doesn't wet the bed at night. | 1.2674 | 0.05078 | 86 | 64 | 21 | 1 |
2660 | If you just lend him your Birkenstocks, he's a cinch for Best in Show. | 1.2674 | 0.05341 | 86 | 65 | 19 | 2 |
2661 | Hey Timmy I already have one bitch of a child , I don’t need another ok pal? | 1.2674 | 0.06282 | 86 | 69 | 11 | 6 |
2662 | Lassie is ready for the responsibility. She promises to feed you in the morning and evening and take you out for bathroom breaks three times a day. | 1.2674 | 0.05341 | 86 | 65 | 19 | 2 |
2663 | While the position as favorite child has been filled, we've got a great new opening as family pet. | 1.2674 | 0.05341 | 86 | 65 | 19 | 2 |
2664 | And when you're housebroken, you can be a good little boy, too. | 1.2674 | 0.05341 | 86 | 65 | 19 | 2 |
2665 | I thought we were past the leash! Why can't you be more like your brother? | 1.2674 | 0.06060 | 86 | 68 | 13 | 5 |
2666 | Don't be jealous, Bobby - Scout hasn't figured out how to tie his shoes yet. | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2667 | C'mon; imagine what a few weeks at Obedience School can do for you. | 1.2674 | 0.05830 | 86 | 67 | 15 | 4 |
2668 | Son! Even though your mom calls Fido her baby, she still loves you. | 1.2674 | 0.06060 | 86 | 68 | 13 | 5 |
2669 | For the last time, you can't get neutered like you brother... | 1.2674 | 0.05830 | 86 | 67 | 15 | 4 |
2670 | Be nice Buddy, everyone in our pod gets treated the same. | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2671 | okay, big guy, you know the drill. head on over to that ageless, well-dressed professional woman and do something adorably helpless. cry out for momma, chocolate on your face, whatever. then I come up and hit on her. then Baxter snatches her iPhone. | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2672 | I told you to never call your sister a dog-face again! | 1.2674 | 0.05591 | 86 | 66 | 17 | 3 |
2673 | Yes, your stepmother is technically a bitch, but I’d like you to stop calling her that. | 1.2674 | 0.06060 | 86 | 68 | 13 | 5 |
2674 | Don't cry buddy, when you get toilet trained you'll get a little blue suit too. | 1.2674 | 0.05341 | 86 |