Contest #738


Cartoon

738

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “Can’t wait to see the look on his face when we put these back on the tree.”
  2. “As long as we’re up here, we should do the gutters.”
  3. “A friendly gesture can make first contact go a lot better.”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2020-12-20T23:32:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2021-01-17T23:33:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2021-01-11T23:33:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued January 18, 2021
Number of captions 7888
Number of responses 939433
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Just to mess with him put them back on the tree. 2.1727 0.00633 14665 3256 5621 5788
1 Wait, did they say 'take the man and leave' or 'take the man and leaves?' 2.0634 0.00746 11207 3164 4168 3875
2 This is your first abduction, isn’t it? 2.0288 0.00708 12535 3768 4638 4129
3 Must be valuable, they spend hours collecting them! 2.0077 0.00721 11577 3439 4610 3528
4 Trust me—I know their language. If he’s ‘raking it in,’ it’s money. 1.9211 0.00792 10315 3779 3571 2965
5 No, the OTHER pile of useless organic matter. 1.9198 0.00848 9386 3573 2993 2820
6 We travel 1,000 light years and you miss by three feet. 1.9194 0.00825 9594 3549 3269 2776
7 I AM getting the intelligent life form! The other one still hasn’t accepted the election results. 1.9010 0.01005 7040 2894 1953 2193
8 I think you've slightly misinterpreted "A good interplanetary explorer discreetly gathers information and leaves." 1.8925 0.01005 6634 2619 2109 1906
9 As long as we're up here we should do the gutters. 1.8828 0.00898 8184 3236 2671 2277
10 After the year they’ve had, it’s the least we can do. 1.8787 0.00821 9355 3582 3326 2447
11 Trust me. This is how we win the suburbs. 1.8566 0.02029 1569 635 524 410
12 If they only knew our money grows on their trees. 1.8351 0.01728 2050 824 740 486
13 Another job lost to illegal aliens. 1.8202 0.02839 840 373 245 222
14 Now spread them all over the place and see if he’ll do it again. 1.8138 0.02106 1434 614 473 347
15 Now watch his expression when I put them back on the tree. 1.7938 0.04141 388 177 114 97
16 Put them in the neighbor's yard so he has to say aliens did it." 1.7854 0.00938 7311 3306 2268 1737
17 I guess his wife is the hunter. 1.7740 0.01133 5062 2346 1514 1202
18 No, no - not the leaves. We are supposed to extract the species with the highest intellect. The squirrel is over there. 1.7569 0.02668 831 371 291 169
19 This advanced species makes oxygen, reduces CO2, and changes colors. 1.7542 0.01157 4731 2222 1450 1059
20 First, you get them to believe you are here to help them. 1.7512 0.01126 4541 2013 1645 883
21 Can’t wait to see the look on his face when we put these back on the tree. 1.7478 0.00900 7640 3570 2427 1643
22 It’s not as fun as crop circles, but it keeps them busy during the lock down. 1.7231 0.02343 975 433 379 163
23 What trouble? We just beam them up and dump them over the fence. I've seen him do it dozens of times. 1.7169 0.00974 6100 2873 2081 1146
24 I guess the trees make them do it. Wait until you see what the dogs make them do. 1.7066 0.01298 3787 1933 1036 818
25 He's lucky we're vegan." 1.7017 0.01927 1549 745 521 283
26 Please let it taste better than kale. 1.6998 0.01053 5437 2698 1673 1066
27 Idiot! That’s the lawn tractor beam. 1.6991 0.01247 4440 2401 974 1065
28 I said hover not hoover. 1.6939 0.01362 3241 1622 989 630
29 Why do you only do chores on other planets? 1.6917 0.01295 3548 1771 1100 677
30 Another American job lost to an illegal alien. 1.6907 0.01383 3366 1765 877 724
31 Everything’s good as long as they think we’re from Amazon. 1.6844 0.03324 507 247 173 87
32 The human next door wants us to abduct his, too. 1.6764 0.01261 3464 1696 1193 575
33 This always seems like a fun idea until you hit the dog poop. 1.6655 0.02629 867 453 251 163
34 We’re 67,000,000 miles from home, and you just realized you forgot your glasses? 1.6623 0.02589 844 429 271 144
35 Do you think his wife will find it harder to believe he saw us or that he actually raked the lawn? 1.6444 0.01735 1870 977 581 312
36 It's the least we can do after the anal probe. 1.6413 0.01897 1681 918 448 315
37 No, I didn’t “miss”. Can’t a guy just do something nice? 1.6405 0.02702 687 340 254 93
38 Trump’s missing votes. 1.6350 0.02744 800 440 212 148
39 I told you we should have come last year... nothing scares them anymore... 1.6326 0.01957 1508 814 434 260
40 He’s spent all afternoon collecting them - they must be worth SOMETHING 1.6318 0.01353 2846 1458 978 410
41 You know, Shift-Alt-L does the same thing. 1.6312 0.03362 507 273 148 86
42 I find that random acts of kindness before the anal probe always helps. 1.6297 0.01523 2614 1455 672 487
43 I don’t think ‘Take me to your leafer’ was the right line. 1.6284 0.03143 584 317 167 100
44 Then we'll dump them in the yard down the street where they cut down all their trees. 1.6277 0.01587 2380 1321 624 435
45 Well OK, but feeding and taking care of them will be all your responsibility. 1.6275 0.02612 765 395 260 110
46 The real fun starts when his wife gets home and we beam them back down again. 1.6262 0.01483 2555 1374 762 419
47 Can you take Trump too? 1.6251 0.02689 875 502 199 174
48 He was collecting them. They must be important. 1.6223 0.01417 2497 1275 890 332
49 This is the last day of your free trial. Your service will continue next week at $14.99/month. 1.6187 0.03121 535 280 179 76
50 He looks benign, but how does he know my name is Scotty? 1.6110 0.02330 1018 556 302 160
51 Little do they know that our money grows on their trees." 1.6084 0.01693 1938 1066 565 307
52 It's strange phenomenon. They write about them, then they jump in them, then they burn them. 1.6064 0.02905 592 310 205 77
53 When you said the landscaping industry loves to employ illegal aliens, I don't think they mean us. 1.6033 0.01768 1782 990 509 283
54 Walt was mighty impressed with his new lawn guy's quality of equipment. 1.6026 0.03193 536 295 159 82
55 This is what Finland actually does to prevent forest fires. 1.6023 0.02812 694 383 204 107
56 Are you absolutely sure these are the ballots? 1.5991 0.01915 1609 926 402 281
57 As long as we do the landscaping no one will care that we are illegal aliens. 1.5980 0.01887 1637 938 419 280
58 Leaf sample collection may not be exciting, but it sure beats probe duty! 1.5958 0.03556 428 237 127 64
59 I know the prime directive is not to interfere but, for God’s sake, look at the size of his yard. 1.5929 0.02052 1437 846 330 261
60 He was nice about us taking his wife, it's the least we can do. 1.5922 0.02046 1329 751 369 209
61 Eat your salad first, and THEN you can have the protein. 1.5915 0.01916 1454 806 436 212
62 They must be valuable. Everyone collects them. 1.5842 0.01935 1342 732 436 174
63 Ok, now drop them into the neighbor’s yard. 1.5811 0.02005 1282 711 397 174
64 The day the aliens felt that Frank had a hard enough 2020. 1.5796 0.02049 1244 696 375 173
65 ''Take me to your leafer.' Am I saying that right? 1.5789 0.02048 1235 689 377 169
66 Once I eat one, I can’t stop. 1.5787 0.02603 807 462 223 122
67 this is the easy part. The rough part comes in April when we have to reattach them...... 1.5777 0.02149 1177 673 328 176
68 Don’t tell him we’re also sending back all of his missing socks. 1.5764 0.02602 779 440 229 110
69 These must be the dominant lifeform, they're everywhere! 1.5734 0.02135 1151 652 338 161
70 I'm telling you, we do a couple nice deeds like this, and they never see the invasion coming. 1.5727 0.02103 1128 625 360 143
71 We cost more but we're quieter than a leaf blower. 1.5682 0.02524 799 450 244 105
72 A friendly gesture can make first contact go a lot better. 1.5669 0.02068 1069 576 380 113
73 Remind me,were we supposed to take the human and leave,or take the human and leaves? 1.5657 0.02272 1020 586 291 143
74 I would take the earthling home but honestly who wants to hear any more about 2020? 1.5622 0.02388 980 582 245 153
75 Student driver. Please be patient. 1.5619 0.02276 929 516 304 109
76 We went from building the pyramids to this? 1.5619 0.02308 970 558 280 132
77 Can you believe it, Gerald, they're just throwing these away! 1.5606 0.02318 965 555 279 131
78 This will go into our museum’s exhibit on human futility. 1.5602 0.02375 964 567 254 143
79 After the break: exclusive Fox News video exposes how inter-galactic DNC operatives stole thousands of Trump ballots. 1.5593 0.02573 894 548 192 154
80 Court ordered community service isn't what it used to be. I miss building pyramids. 1.5591 0.02431 914 537 243 134
81 It must be important. They spend a lot of time gathering it. 1.5580 0.02314 939 535 284 120
82 It’s unbelievable that it just grows on trees down here! 1.5580 0.02338 939 540 274 125
83 We will distribute them to neighbors who have recently raked. It is more amusing, even, than making crop circles. 1.5579 0.02335 941 541 275 125
84 I have to be honest. Your first abduction is not going well. 1.5559 0.02308 858 471 297 90
85 Set your phasers to “mulch” 1.5547 0.03149 521 302 149 70
86 My understanding is, if he gets them all he can mate with his wife 1.5520 0.03575 433 260 107 66
87 I told you to bring more toilet paper. 1.5511 0.02445 851 493 247 111
88 Just take the leaves. Everyone will really think he's crazy! 1.5503 0.04168 298 174 84 40
89 Thanks; and while you're at, could you pick up the yapping little dog next door, too, please? 1.5491 0.02504 825 483 231 111
90 They seem to collect theses, so they must have some value. 1.5480 0.02377 834 470 271 93
91 After receiving some help with his Saturday afternoon chores, Dan reconsiders his views on alien labor laws. 1.5476 0.02677 714 417 203 94
92 If you’d brought enough toilet paper, we wouldn’t have to do this. 1.5463 0.02535 789 460 227 102
93 I'm not leaving Vermont without a souvenir. 1.5445 0.02510 797 464 232 101
94 You told me I'm just an alien who eats shoots and leaves. Now you're saying you forgot a comma? 1.5436 0.02626 802 488 192 122
95 Ballots, you idiot. We're supposed to be harvesting ballots! 1.5426 0.02675 728 432 197 99
96 Can you come back in a month and get the snow from the driveway? 1.5423 0.02612 769 458 205 106
97 We know two things: This is not Area 51,and you never ask for directions. 1.5421 0.03405 439 258 124 57
98 The guy, you idiot; aim at the guy! 1.5410 0.02546 769 449 224 96
99 haha, do you think they’ll ever realize these can be fuel?!” “No, they’re still digging in the earth for that. 1.5405 0.03690 370 217 106 47
100 I’m starving and he looks delicious. Do we really have to have the salad first? 1.5401 0.02600 761 451 209 101
101 Will you be back when it snows? 1.5399 0.03469 426 252 118 56
102 We should charge more than $40 a week... 1.5391 0.03095 499 287 155 57
103 You see the look on his face now? Wait till I blow these back all over the yard. 1.5385 0.02611 767 459 203 105
104 I said take him before he leaves, not take his leaves! 1.5374 0.02635 735 436 203 96
105 I love space, but I miss seasons. 1.5374 0.02686 722 432 192 98
106 It drives them crazy when we put them back! 1.5372 0.02585 713 413 218 82
107 I miss making crop circles. 1.5365 0.02560 753 441 220 92
108 Switch it to blow - it really irritates them. 1.5361 0.02784 664 396 180 88
109 Our earth mission to collect intelligent life forms is now complete” 1.5356 0.02684 702 416 196 90
110 I think it said "rake me to your leafer." 1.5356 0.02677 745 452 187 106
111 We beam them up. Then we come back during the night and arrange the leaves on his lawn in a perfect circle formation. 1.5350 0.02583 714 413 220 81
112 You'll see why it was worth traveling across galaxies after you jump on them. 1.5340 0.02725 706 426 183 97
113 When I was your age, we collected humans — but this is much more relaxing. 1.5330 0.03429 394 226 126 42
114 I think we can get him to buy one. Emphasize how it’s much more quiet than a leaf blower. 1.5328 0.02666 687 403 202 82
115 I thought leaf pickup was tomorrow. 1.5324 0.03615 340 192 115 33
116 The person, dammit, the person! 1.5315 0.02710 683 406 191 86
117 They must be very valuable! They spend so much time and effort collecting them. 1.5312 0.02629 689 401 210 78
118 We have enough humans, I need mulch for my garden. 1.5306 0.02738 671 400 186 85
119 He's collecting them. They must be valuable! 1.5298 0.02636 672 389 210 73
120 Forget about the human. I thought we'd eat vegetarian tonight. 1.5292 0.02685 667 391 199 77
121 And when he’s not looking, we’ll drop them all again. It’s hilarious! 1.5250 0.02813 640 386 172 82
122 Do they really think that they made the pyramids? 1.5250 0.02822 640 387 170 83
123 I can't believe that we've come all this way and you forgot the toilet paper. 1.5239 0.02889 628 385 157 86
124 The technology to fly here from Mars and this is what impresses them! 1.5239 0.02809 628 376 175 77
125 Before they kill all of the trees, grab a souvenir 1.5191 0.04316 262 157 74 31
126 Tell him we also do snow removal. 1.5185 0.02780 594 348 184 62
127 See? That's what happens when you text while abduction beaming. 1.5183 0.02868 575 341 170 64
128 We’ll put them in the neighbors yard, grab some popcorn, sit back and enjoy the show. 1.5158 0.02866 601 364 164 73
129 ...and again, we can't find toilet paper anywhere. 1.5137 0.04073 292 176 82 34
130 I miss the old days when we would just show up in the neighborhood and scare the hell out of people. 1.5129 0.02819 583 346 175 62
131 Humans collect these in piles, so they must be valuable. 1.5128 0.04123 273 162 82 29
132 Our ancestors built great pyramids for them - now look at us." 1.5126 0.02919 556 333 161 62
133 They collect them in huge piles, of course they're valuable! 1.5126 0.02834 556 340 153 63
134 Did he just say, "Clean the gutters?" 1.5125 0.02955 558 338 154 66
135 I bet he never thought an alien would take his job. 1.5124 0.02913 566 341 160 65
136 Now, re-materialize them in the front yard. 1.5093 0.02968 538 324 154 60
137 We can return later for the lesser being 1.5093 0.02837 538 313 176 49
138 When they told us our mission was to clean up the planet, I pictured something loftier." 1.5084 0.02909 535 317 164 54
139 " I don't see any signs of intelligent life anywhere, but let's check out these just in case 1.5081 0.03032 555 345 138 72
140 It’s the least we could do with the year they’re having. 1.5074 0.02968 538 325 153 60
141 After the probe, this is the least we can do for him. 1.5055 0.03043 542 336 138 68
142 We gave them Biden. We made them a vaccine. We did their yard work. Not even a 'thank you'. 1.5049 0.03157 511 319 126 66
143 I love when our dinner entree makes us a salad. 1.5048 0.03022 525 320 145 60
144 Watch what happens when we return them as $100 bills. 1.5030 0.03092 495 301 139 55
145 Wow, a planet where it does grow on trees! 1.5028 0.02904 527 313 163 51
146 We found the missing ballots, Mr President. 1.5000 0.03337 480 308 104 68
147 Take me to your leafer" - you sure that's not a typo? The d and f are right next to each other.. 1.4990 0.03272 495 317 109 69
148 He wants to know if we can come every Saturday. 1.4990 0.03141 493 305 130 58
149 This is how to make friends with the earthlings! 1.4990 0.03056 485 292 144 49
150 I'm telling you, based on how much time the earthlings spends tending to these, they must be its most valuable resource. 1.4980 0.03047 502 306 142 54
151 The material appears to be harmless, but they gather it obsessively, just to destroy it 1.4969 0.03014 485 290 149 46
152 It's jammed, ET. Phone Home Depot. 1.4969 0.03902 318 197 84 37
153 If he steps into the light it counts as consent. 1.4965 0.03260 423 255 126 42
154 I told you we should have packed more toilet paper 1.4949 0.03254 491 314 111 66
155 Now watch his expression when I press SUCK. 1.4948 0.03074 481 292 140 49
156 Yeah, I love the look on his face, but here's the good part: about 3AM we put it all back. 1.4947 0.03256 475 300 115 60
157 The best part is that no one is going to believe him. 1.4938 0.03214 486 307 118 61
158 Damn Aliens. Coming over here, taking our jobs. 1.4927 0.03236 479 303 116 60
159 You couldn't just say "Best Lawn Service on Zork" in the ad. You had to say "Best Lawn Service in the Universe." 1.4911 0.03243 450 279 121 50
160 well that's it for the test run. Next week we use real ballots. 1.4911 0.03435 450 292 95 63
161 Can you come back In January and shovel my driveway? 1.4904 0.03217 469 294 120 55
162 Can't wait to see the look on his face when we put them back tomorrow 1.4901 0.03272 453 284 116 53
163 If everyone is raking them up, they must be valuable. 1.4892 0.03066 464 280 141 43
164 Uh...go forward two feet and try again. 1.4890 0.03237 454 283 120 51
165 Should we do the gutters next? 1.4886 0.03195 438 267 128 43
166 Now take me to your weeder. 1.4885 0.03587 393 251 92 50
167 You guys couldn't have shown up 15 minutes ago? 1.4879 0.03246 455 285 118 52
168 Our studies show they only hoard things they value. 1.4868 0.03073 456 275 140 41
169 Because they’re lighter and they don’t scream when you eat them. 1.4860 0.03299 428 266 116 46
170 Lucky for him we are vegan. 1.4856 0.03191 451 279 125 47
171 We’re only taking the jobs Americans don’t want. 1.4856 0.03267 451 284 115 52
172 I probed his mind for his deepest desire, and this is what we got. 1.4854 0.03191 445 274 126 45
173 Immigrants: we get the job done. 1.4851 0.03450 435 282 95 58
174 It's a training mission, your aim will improve. 1.4851 0.03372 435 277 105 53
175 It's OK - he won't see the force for the trees. 1.4837 0.04376 246 154 65 27
176 After everything they’ve been through this year? It’s the least we can do! 1.4828 0.03340 435 276 108 51
177 Do you do gutters, too? 1.4825 0.03342 429 271 109 49
178 If you miss one more time, I'm taking over. 1.4816 0.03387 407 255 108 44
179 Nothing surprises them anymore. 1.4806 0.03286 412 254 118 40
180 We need to find out why earthlings turn color before they die! 1.4802 0.03309 429 270 112 47
181 Illegal aliens taking my job 1.4793 0.03501 411 266 93 52
182 Can you believe they throw these things away? 1.4788 0.03236 424 262 121 41
183 I told the kids I'd bring home some souvenirs 1.4787 0.03123 422 254 134 34
184 And yet you won't do any yardwork at home. 1.4787 0.03349 422 267 108 47
185 This isn’t even the weirdest thing to happen in 2020 1.4776 0.03609 379 244 89 46
186 They must be valuable, these humanoids keep collecting them. 1.4770 0.03315 413 258 113 42
187 Finally. Intelligent life. 1.4763 0.03294 401 247 117 37
188 I don't think he believes we're with city services. 1.4763 0.03478 401 257 97 47
189 Throw these in a laminator and you got souvenir bookmarks for everyone. 1.4763 0.03424 401 254 103 44
190 I don't care that this pays more. I still say it's a demotion from crop circles. 1.4757 0.04288 267 172 63 32
191 Instructions are 1) Get life form. 2) leave. NOT leaves. Trust me on this one. 1.4756 0.03591 410 272 81 57
192 Can you believe this? Our money grows on their trees! 1.4755 0.03537 408 267 88 53
193 Klaktar! The transmission was Aliens Leave, not Alien Leaves!!!! 1.4755 0.03520 408 266 90 52
194 Would it kill you to abduct the leaves at home? 1.4742 0.03509 407 265 91 51
195 Ok, now put them back on the tree. See what he does. 1.4738 0.03274 401 247 118 36
196 I did set the tractor beam to collect intelligent lifeforms. 1.4735 0.04700 226 147 51 28
197 We will now commence our attack, Earthling, by clogging your gutters. 1.4734 0.03386 395 248 107 40
198 If they're not valuable, why is he working so hard collecting them? 1.4730 0.03266 389 249 103 37
199 No I said “beam human and LEAVE”, not “leaves”. 1.4727 0.03391 385 240 108 37
200 I almost feel like we're doing him a favor. 1.4722 0.03342 396 247 111 38
201 Damn it, I’m an exobiologist, not a marksman! 1.4707 0.03301 393 243 115 35
202 When they came for the leaves, I said nothing... 1.4701 0.03603 385 252 85 48
203 Actual footage of aliens stealing our jobs. 1.4691 0.03430 388 246 102 40
204 Leave the tall one alone; he’s part of a threatened species. 1.4688 0.03514 384 247 94 43
205 Take us to your leader, Four Seasons Landscaping 1.4688 0.03533 384 248 92 44
206 My friends asked me to bring them some seasonal souvenirs, these are pretty nice. 1.4678 0.03576 342 214 96 32
207 I'm warning you. If you suck these up now, he'll be expecting it every year. 1.4672 0.03475 381 243 98 40
208 We can't take the landscaper, he's an illegal alien ! 1.4670 0.03568 379 246 89 44
209 This is grassroot diplomacy at its finest. 1.4667 0.04410 225 141 63 21
210 Shall we take their slave as well? 1.4660 0.03743 324 206 85 33
211 There's a delicious human dinner just waiting to be beamed up, but nooo - you had to pick today to go vegan. 1.4655 0.03838 333 218 75 40
212 Really? The last time we flew all this way, we helped them build the pyramids. 1.4654 0.03608 376 246 85 45
213 And when he's asleep, we'll put them all back. 1.4651 0.03577 372 241 89 42
214 Honest, they're attracted to the light. Move it around a little. 1.4646 0.03675 353 229 84 40
215 ...then we drop them in his neighbor’s yard. 1.4632 0.03508 367 234 96 37
216 Tell him we were just leaving. 1.4630 0.03543 365 234 93 38
217 Very good. Now let's try parallel parking. 1.4626 0.03698 361 238 79 44
218 You misheard our leader again, Captain. This is not the wrinkled, burnt orange mess that the earthlings need help removing 1.4622 0.04050 344 239 51 54
219 Sure beats those noisy leaf blowers. 1.4618 0.03494 353 222 99 32
220 A couple more then hit blow 1.4618 0.03652 353 229 85 39
221 No, I'm pretty sure we're collecting the more intelligent being. 1.4617 0.03428 366 230 103 33
222 Haven't had a student driver this bad since Roswell. 1.4615 0.03696 364 241 78 45
223 I love messing with their heads. Beam this lot onto his driveway. 1.4613 0.03782 310 197 83 30
224 Which one of us is Scotty? 1.4608 0.03818 306 195 81 30
225 It’s the most intelligent life here. 1.4595 0.03496 346 217 99 30
226 Let’s put them in his neighbor’s yard. 1.4595 0.03591 346 221 91 34
227 See, nothing phases them anymore 1.4594 0.03686 357 235 80 42
228 No! I meant the pile on the left. 1.4594 0.03466 357 225 100 32
229 Contactless pickup 1.4585 0.03655 325 206 89 30
230 His wife is going to be happy, but she's never going to believe him. 1.4581 0.03756 334 218 79 37
231 We come in peace but specifically because the neighborhood agreed no more leaf blowers. 1.4564 0.05100 195 131 39 25
232 Can't we just cure cancer for them instead? 1.4556 0.03769 338 223 76 39
233 Do you think he gets we're just screwing with him? 1.4551 0.03658 334 221 79 34
234 He really has that human-in-the-headlight look. 1.4551 0.03584 334 212 92 30
235 Let's see what it does when we spread them out again 1.4551 0.03658 334 215 86 33
236 Visitors from planet Roomba. 1.4551 0.03780 345 230 73 42
237 they’ve had a rough year, it’s the least we can do. 1.4551 0.03597 345 222 89 34
238 Another benefit of Amazon Prime 1.4548 0.03916 310 204 71 35
239 The trees have been using these things to manipulate human behavior for thousands of years. 1.4548 0.03713 321 206 84 31
240 "What makes you so sure this is where you lost your earring?" 1.4545 0.03675 341 222 83 36
241 Damn spellcheck! Why would anyone want to be taken to a leafer? 1.4545 0.03880 341 231 65 45
242 See? Nothing fazes them anymore. 1.4540 0.03709 315 201 85 29
243 We're witnessing the fall of civilization 1.4537 0.03790 324 212 77 35
244 I'm telling you, he would not be gathering it if it were not valuable! 1.4533 0.04370 214 134 63 17
245 Quickly, before he hoards them again. 1.4532 0.03631 331 212 88 31
246 We'll be back to do your gutters next Tuesday. 1.4531 0.03641 320 203 89 28
247 Why isn't he scared?" "He's from Earth, we are probably the least scary thing he has seen this year 1.4529 0.03888 340 231 64 45
248 Inform space force we have located the stolen Trump ballots. 1.4529 0.03843 340 229 68 43
249 It’ll add to the mystery when they come looking for him. 1.4529 0.03634 340 220 86 34
250 Control, Alt, Deleaf? 1.4528 0.04050 307 207 61 39
251 You guys do snow too? 1.4528 0.03997 307 205 65 37
252 We found a pile of intelligent life next to that biped with the rake 1.4526 0.03789 327 215 76 36
253 It appears they count them even though the poplar vote does not matter. 1.4524 0.03714 336 220 80 36
254 First we get them to love us. 1.4522 0.03825 314 205 76 33
255 It’s simple but effective because they’re so grateful that they never think to make a run for it. 1.4522 0.03851 314 206 74 34
256 ...and then we'll just put them back tomorrow. 1.4521 0.03632 334 215 87 32
257 You sure the phrase was ‘take me to your leafer?‘ 1.4521 0.03825 334 223 71 40
258 Let's put it on his neighbors lawn. 1.4521 0.03825 334 223 71 40
259 I promised the kids something from every galaxy. 1.4517 0.03789 321 210 77 34
260 It must be something very special, he’s collecting all he can. 1.4517 0.03891 321 214 69 38
261 It’s the least we can do for him after all the probing. 1.4517 0.03840 321 212 73 36
262 Wow, the city's new leaf composting service is out of this world. 1.4511 0.04922 184 119 47 18
263 Dang it! Why'd they put the 'vacuum' button so close to the 'abduction' button?" 1.4508 0.03975 295 194 69 32
264 Get as much as you can for analysis. They must eat this stuff continuously. Just look at the size of that fork! 1.4502 0.03754 331 218 77 36
265 Another job lost to aliens 1.4502 0.03630 331 213 87 31
266 A little bit to the left... 1.4502 0.03579 331 211 91 29
267 Beams leaves and leaves. 1.4498 0.03569 329 209 92 28
268 Before we head home, let's dump this pile of leaves in Roswell. 1.4495 0.03861 327 219 69 39
269 Leaf pickup day in Roswell, New Mexico. 1.4495 0.03965 287 187 71 29
270 The leaf may prove more intelligent than the life. 1.4494 0.03753 316 205 80 31
271 This is so much more useful than crop circles, and it's renewable! 1.4490 0.03797 314 205 77 32
272 No, the carbon aggregation wearing a hat. 1.4482 0.03963 299 198 68 33
273 Hey, I'm not the one that blew up Andromeda and got us community service. 1.4478 0.04067 297 200 61 36
274 Will you please stop fooling around? No, this thing doesn’t have a ‘mulch mode.’ 1.4475 0.03762 324 213 77 34
275 We are still searching for intelligent life on earth. 1.4469 0.03873 320 214 69 37
276 This is your first crop circle, isn't it? 1.4463 0.03940 307 205 67 35
277 'tractor beam specialist...my ass...You lied on your resume, didn't you?' 1.4463 0.03913 307 204 69 34
278 Ohhh earth chips I can’t eat just one.... 1.4452 0.03776 310 202 78 30
279 I guess the saying “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure” is literally universal 1.4448 0.03873 317 212 69 36
280 I don’t think you’re ready for your abduction test tomorrow. 1.4448 0.03742 317 207 79 31
281 I hear they also collect dog poop 1.4448 0.03847 317 211 71 35
282 Not only are they delicious, these guys will put em in a pile for us. 1.4448 0.03742 317 207 79 31
283 You think their yard-cleaning technology is primitive, you should see how they reproduce 1.4444 0.03949 306 205 66 35
284 I know it seems silly, but they smell great when you burn them. 1.4434 0.03584 309 195 91 23
285 We’re making an appointment with the optometrist. 1.4429 0.04096 280 187 62 31
286 It’ll be good in a salad. 1.4426 0.03847 305 201 73 31
287 "Yea, it's a Dyson." 1.4420 0.04634 224 151 47 26
288 When we get home we'll beam them into Zark's yard. Hate that guy. 1.4419 0.03883 310 207 69 34
289 I hope this goes better than the time we took samples from that cow pasture. 1.4419 0.03774 310 203 77 30
290 Heads, we probe him and wipe his memory, tales, we make him President. 1.4417 0.04361 283 199 43 41
291 Every year I do some poor schmuck a mitzvah. 1.4416 0.03707 308 199 82 27
292 Imagine: OUR currency grows on THEIR trees! 1.4416 0.03929 308 207 66 35
293 I think they told us to dump it in the green barrel. 1.4412 0.03781 306 200 77 29
294 Next stop Norway. I heard that they rake the forests there. 1.4411 0.03893 297 196 71 30
295 He looks like a serious leaf collector. Let's give him as many as we can find. 1.4401 0.04052 284 190 63 31
296 I got the new model: this one eats leaves and shoots 1.4401 0.03990 284 188 67 29
297 Don’t worry, 51.3 percent of the population won’t believe him. 1.4401 0.03959 284 187 69 28
298 I know you wanted a tractor beam, but the leafblower beam was so much cheaper. 1.4401 0.03766 284 181 81 22
299 Are these the ones you can smoke? 1.4401 0.03799 284 182 79 23
300 Um, Zog, I'm not sure this is what High Command meant when they told us to sweep up the Earth. 1.4389 0.03836 303 200 73 30
301 They must have great value – his kind spends hours every day gathering them. 1.4389 0.03600 303 192 89 22
302 These things must be useful. They keep arranging them into groups. 1.4389 0.03661 303 194 85 24
303 We're hoovering, not hovering 1.4389 0.03720 303 196 81 26
304 These stupid humans travel to the moon to collect rocks. 1.4384 0.03999 292 196 64 32
305 Of course he'll follow them onboard. He's been chasing them around the yard for hours. 1.4384 0.03940 292 194 68 30
306 Unlike their leaders, these leaves know when there time is up. 1.4382 0.04339 267 184 49 34
307 If you can take a minute and leave a review on the app, we’d really appreciate it. 1.4366 0.04081 284 192 60 32
308 This might be the first recorded sighting of an alien stealing an American job. 1.4364 0.04008 291 196 63 32
309 Two lightyears as an intern and your aim is still terrible. 1.4364 0.03827 291 190 75 26
310 Is it customary to tip the biofuel attendant? 1.4362 0.03881 298 198 70 30
311 Once we confiscate their harvest they will have to surrender 1.4358 0.04015 296 201 61 34
312 I'm so glad we found a vegan option. 1.4349 0.03816 292 191 75 26
313 Looks like you've got the hang of it. Now try going for the human. 1.4345 0.03987 290 195 64 31
314 We really need to take this thing into the shop. 1.4334 0.03744 293 190 79 24
315 Don’t forget to leave us a good review. 1.4331 0.03987 284 190 65 29
316 Just put them on my neighbor's lawn. 1.4331 0.04048 284 192 61 31
317 Don’t give me that look. I’ve heard the crunchy ones are fun to step on. 1.4331 0.03827 284 185 75 24
318 They will worship us like gods after this, Gorad 1.4325 0.03843 289 190 73 26
319 Fine, take 'em but can I have the dog back? 1.4321 0.04090 280 190 59 31
320 Think of it as salad before the main course. 1.4321 0.03893 287 190 70 27
321 I can’t believe these just grow on trees here. 1.4321 0.03798 287 187 76 24
322 They have this virus going on right now so we're sticking to the vegetation until they get that under control. 1.4320 0.05224 169 114 37 18
323 When I said "Beam 'em up, Scottie", I mean the human, not the leaves! 1.4316 0.04068 285 194 59 32
324 This must be their currency. Their offspring say it grows on trees you know. 1.4316 0.03944 285 190 67 28
325 I hope he doesn't learn how valuable these are. 1.4315 0.04673 197 130 49 18
326 When you're done here, let's get the presidential ballots. 1.4312 0.04069 276 186 61 29
327 We're just in time to save these creatures before that murderer rakes them into his bonfire. 1.4311 0.05200 167 112 38 17
328 ”He’ll never tell anyone he hired illegal aliens to do the leaf blowing. 1.4311 0.03996 283 190 64 29
329 Aw, c'mon! Let me push the 'scatter' button just this once. 1.4311 0.03770 283 195 60 28
330 Are you sure these spark joy? 1.4311 0.03868 283 186 72 25
331 No son - the human. It's alright. That's why we're practicing. 1.4302 0.04096 258 171 63 24
332 Oh, leave em’ alone, Charlie... They’ve suffered enough. 1.4299 0.04401 221 146 55 20
333 Who’s going to believe him? 1.4286 0.03896 280 185 70 25
334 Four Planets: Total Landscaping 1.4286 0.04213 266 182 54 30
335 Every 10,000 years we do this. And every 10,000 years the damned leaves are still there. 1.4286 0.04250 245 164 57 24
336 I like to mess with their minds before I abduct 'em. 1.4281 0.03949 278 185 67 26
337 „Sorry, can you take a step forward? It’s my first day“ - 1.4280 0.04199 236 155 61 20
338 It's sweet revenge for the theft of our rocks. 1.4271 0.04981 192 132 38 22
339 That’s funny, they don’t seem to be as surprised this year 1.4270 0.03956 274 182 67 25
340 You wanna take my mother-in-law while your at it 1.4270 0.04099 267 180 60 27
341 We flew 4 million light years and you do this? 1.4255 0.03772 275 178 77 20
342 They must be valuable. Look how much time he spends arranging them. 1.4255 0.03807 275 179 75 21
343 Now you're just messing with him. 1.4255 0.04077 275 187 59 29
344 Why do they just leave spaceship fuel laying around like this? 1.4255 0.04044 275 186 61 28
345 Trust me. We're better off taking these back for study. 1.4255 0.03910 275 182 69 24
346 Closest thing to intelligent life we could find. 1.4255 0.03944 275 183 67 25
347 Crunchy with a hint of oak,you won’t be able to eat just one. 1.4255 0.04109 275 188 57 30
348 Why isn't he upset we're taking these things he spent hours collecting? 1.4255 0.03944 275 183 67 25
349 Affirmative Captain. Bringing back the most intelligent life form on this Planet. Mission complete. 1.4255 0.04077 275 187 59 29
350 For fun, we'll gather them up and then drop them off in a yard with no trees! 1.4249 0.03719 273 175 80 18
351 And we still have three more yards to do after this one. 1.4249 0.03998 273 183 64 26
352 If this doesn’t convince then we come in peace, I don’t know what will... 1.4249 0.03965 273 182 66 25
353 The instructions were to rape the planet, not rake it, you idiot! 1.4249 0.04489 233 160 47 26
354 The leaf vac I got on Amazon is out of this world! 1.4248 0.04004 266 177 65 24
355 You nailed the parallel parking, but you're gonna need to work on your tractor beam if you want your full license. 1.4242 0.04260 231 153 58 20
356 Turns out they make piles of dead tree parts to avoid spending time with their families. 1.4239 0.04192 243 162 59 22
357 It's weird, but not monolith weird. 1.4238 0.04241 269 187 50 32
358 These brown things must be very valuable. It’s the only reason humans would spend all day gathering them. 1.4232 0.03848 267 174 73 20
359 Cadet, I believe I said: ‘We should pick up and leave’. 1.4232 0.03848 267 174 73 20
360 I can't tell the difference - they all taste like qlrffqn to me. 1.4232 0.04131 267 182 57 28
361 It's been a rough 2020 for them. Why not? 1.4232 0.03848 267 174 73 20
362 ok so now the book says to drop them on the neighbor's lawn 1.4232 0.03811 267 173 75 19
363 He asked if we do snow removal 1.4232 0.03992 267 178 65 24
364 Intelligent life? He's not charging us for them. 1.4231 0.05062 182 125 37 20
365 Now watch how his expression changes when we beam up his barbeque. 1.4231 0.03957 260 171 68 21
366 Your OCD is affecting the mission. 1.4223 0.04095 251 167 62 22
367 Honey. I think the neighbors got a roomba! 1.4215 0.04303 261 182 48 31
368 It just seems like a long way to go for salad ingredients. 1.4211 0.03820 266 173 74 19
369 The humans still haven’t discovered that leaves can power inter-galactic space travel. 1.4208 0.04309 240 163 53 24
370 Leave the rake. He borrowed it from his neighbor." 1.4205 0.04058 264 178 61 25
371 Interesting. The children of their species look nothing like the adults. 1.4202 0.04137 257 174 58 25
372 I kinda feel like we owe it to him after... you know. 1.4196 0.04197 255 174 55 26
373 I just don’t want my brother-in-law to know that I hired illegal aliens to do the yard work. 1.4192 0.04279 260 181 49 30
374 Honey...The neighbors are showing off their new leaf blower again. 1.4192 0.04138 260 177 57 26
375 Once we've finished gathering the last of this dwindling resource, the earthlings will be at our mercy" 1.4192 0.04029 260 174 63 23
376 this is way easier than moving the pyramids. 1.4192 0.03954 260 172 67 21
377 It’s the least we can do. It’s been a tough year for them. 1.4192 0.04138 260 177 57 26
378 A little more to your right. 1.4192 0.03992 260 173 65 22
379 They’re not as interesting to study as humans, but they complain a lot less. 1.4186 0.04051 258 173 62 23
380 This seems valuable. When it falls off trees, they try to grab as much as possible. 1.4186 0.03781 258 166 76 16
381 What were the other community service options? 1.4186 0.04161 258 176 56 26
382 They keep collecting these and taking them away in bags. Must be valuable. 1.4186 0.03937 258 170 68 20
383 Let's not smoke these until we're back in orbit. 1.4183 0.04013 251 166 65 20
384 Geez, Earl, your aim is terrible! 1.4183 0.04131 251 169 59 23
385 OK...I’ll try them but if they taste like those kale chips I’m sending them back. . 1.4182 0.04406 220 148 52 20
386 Should we also grab their servant? 1.4177 0.03954 249 163 68 18
387 Watch, the human will irrationally make another pile. 1.4167 0.04182 240 161 58 21
388 Do you mind aiming that thing at the Oval Office? 1.4161 0.05104 161 108 39 14
389 one species’ trash is another species’ path to universal domination 1.4160 0.04218 250 171 54 25
390 "Make sure you get enough so we can jump on the pile. 1.4157 0.04303 255 178 48 29
391 We’re fine, his family already thinks he is crazy. 1.4157 0.04194 255 175 54 26
392 It's a prototype for an Intergalactic Roomba. 1.4153 0.04242 248 170 53 25
393 That's Bob Angone formerly of Chicago Illinois, Miramar Beach Florida, and Austin Texas. He's failed to at least get a third-place finish in the New Yorker Caption Contest for some fifteen years. So, chill, he'll never figure out what we're up to. 1.4149 0.04410 241 168 46 27
394 Business has been booming since the RNC commandeered Four Seasons Total Landscaping. 1.4146 0.04382 246 172 46 28
395 OK, it works for leaves, now the guy. 1.4146 0.04227 246 168 54 24
396 He wants to know if we can come back next year about this time. 1.4146 0.04026 246 163 64 19
397 Lyle wasn't sure whether to be surprised by his visitors or annoyed they waited till his pile was "just right" 👽 1.4146 0.04108 246 165 60 21
398 Should we do the gutters too just to mess with him? 1.4143 0.04089 251 169 60 22
399 Good job, Gorf! Now, slooooowly lift your foot off the clutch. 1.4143 0.04279 251 174 50 27
400 If you had bothered to check before we left - like I told you to - we wouldn't have run out of toilet paper! 1.4143 0.04089 251 169 60 22
401 Then, tomorrow, we put them right back. 1.4143 0.04128 251 170 58 23
402 I think it was "Take me to your leader, not your leafer." 1.4143 0.04279 251 174 50 27
403 Leave! I said LEAVE, Alexa! 1.4143 0.04316 251 175 48 28
404 Well, his last gardener was an illegal alien. 1.4143 0.04128 251 170 58 23
405 I can't wait to put them back on his lawn after he goes to bed. 1.4143 0.04204 251 172 54 25
406 Ok, now blow them back all over the yard! I love this job! 1.4143 0.04242 251 173 52 26
407 He told me if we would pick up the leaves he'd let us park in his backyard. 1.4143 0.03930 251 165 68 18
408 (Whispers) Take me with you. 1.4143 0.04316 251 175 48 28
409 See. If you wait until they've raked, you get that look on their face. Priceless. 1.4137 0.04190 249 170 55 24
410 You realize we’re supposed to be the higher life form, right? 1.4137 0.04190 249 170 55 24
411 Earthlings will love us. We're quieter than leaf blowers. 1.4137 0.04151 249 169 57 23
412 The more I drop, the more he rakes. Watch... 1.4137 0.04112 249 168 59 22
413 Hey, wait! Isn't that the same earthling who suckered us into picking up his dog's doo-doo? 1.4137 0.04379 249 175 45 29
414 Relax … it’s 2020! We don’t have to hide anymore! 1.4137 0.04112 249 168 59 22
415 Did you run out of toilet paper again? 1.4136 0.04402 220 149 51 20
416 If we help with the yard work they don't tattle. 1.4132 0.04196 242 164 56 22
417 Let’s be nice, they’ve had a tough year. 1.4125 0.03876 240 155 71 14
418 I love doing this. Check out the look on his face. 1.4125 0.04008 240 158 65 17
419 Next week, on "Gardeners of the Galaxy" ... 1.4125 0.04179 240 162 57 21
420 Now, beam them into the Human's gutters! 1.4125 0.04422 240 168 45 27
421 Tell no one....And we’ll do this every year. 1.4125 0.04342 240 166 49 25
422 Now lets drop these in the yard of that jerk Marty. 1.4115 0.04016 243 161 64 18
423 You're ABSOLUTELY sure that's what 'leaves much to be desired' means? I don't want another 'barking up the wrong tree' situation. 1.4106 0.04340 246 172 47 27
424 Lets help him out, no one will believe him anyway 1.4106 0.04104 246 170 53 23
425 Put them back...now pick them up again...now put them back... 1.4106 0.04224 246 169 53 24
426 He's oddly unconcerned we are stealing his precious harvest. 1.4106 0.03939 246 162 67 17
427 No! I said "Let's take leave of Earth" 1.4103 0.05966 117 79 28 10
428 We'll bill you. 1.4101 0.04394 217 147 51 19
429 Yep, these appear to be the most intelligent ones. 1.4101 0.04345 217 146 53 18
430 Beat that Mr Dyson! 1.4100 0.04313 239 165 50 24
431 "They're never upset when we take them, only when we put them back." 1.4091 0.03806 242 156 73 13
432 We have leaves at home, Margaret. 1.4091 0.04192 242 165 55 22
433 He agreed to the anal probe if we'd pick up the leaves. 1.4091 0.04353 242 169 47 26
434 Make sure you get enough so we can jump in them. 1.4091 0.04233 242 166 53 23
435 Normally, I’d agree, but he’s not wearing a mask. 1.4091 0.04151 242 164 57 21
436 You know what would be hilarious? 1.4091 0.04110 242 163 59 20
437 This is not the most strangest thing happening to him this year...that's why he is not shocked seeing us! 1.4091 0.04192 242 165 55 22
438 When he tells people he saw a UFO with a leaf blower, they’ll lock him up. 1.4083 0.04133 240 162 58 20
439 It must be important if he’s gathering it. 1.4083 0.04497 240 171 40 29
440 See, this way, no one will believe his story. 1.4083 0.04217 240 164 54 22
441 And to think they are so impressed with a Roomba 1.4083 0.04217 240 164 54 22
442 Leaf samples? It’s like you’re not even trying pass this class, Zorlek. Let’s bring back something more interesting. Maybe that rake? 1.4083 0.04379 240 168 46 26
443 I hope they're crispy. I can't stand the soggy ones. 1.4076 0.04027 238 158 63 17
444 Sometimes I feel like we could be doing more. 1.4076 0.04157 238 161 57 20
445 And then we’ll dump it right back in two weeks! 1.4076 0.04283 238 164 51 23
446 They asked for proof of mankind's fall. 1.4076 0.04324 238 165 49 24
447 Damn illegal aliens takin' all our jobs. 1.4076 0.04324 238 165 49 24
448 Dummy, you hit the "suck" button instead of "blow"! 1.4072 0.05177 167 116 34 17
449 No, a little to MY right." 1.4069 0.04110 231 154 60 17
450 This will make the males obsolete and we will have all the females to ourselves. 1.4069 0.04376 231 160 48 23
451 When Rudy called Illegal Alien Landscaping, this wasn't quite what he expected. 1.4068 0.04553 236 169 38 29
452 He’s puzzled because trash collection is usually on Tuesdays. 1.4061 0.04360 229 158 49 22
453 This is way easier than making crop circles 1.4054 0.04026 222 145 64 13
454 he won’t even notice his wallet is missing after this 1.4054 0.04412 222 153 48 21
455 Glad it is finally legal...this batch will be the best! 1.4049 0.05195 163 113 34 16
456 Yet, they buy mulch. 1.4035 0.04236 228 155 54 19
457 Yes, I am sure these are Trump ballots. 1.4035 0.04502 228 161 42 25
458 They are millennia behind us in lawn care. 1.4034 0.04430 233 164 44 25
459 Sweeping leaves, zapping humans, collecting the Blorf Dust -- do you ever wonder what it all means? 1.4034 0.04513 233 166 40 27
460 Can you come back when it snows? 1.4034 0.04172 233 158 56 19
461 I said a little to your OTHER left, Carl! 1.4034 0.04172 233 158 56 19
462 Quickly before the Earthling realizes the value of his native biomass forms. 1.4027 0.04215 226 153 55 18
463 I think they're precious, Kzreck. This one is trying to get all of them before the long haired one comes out again. 1.4026 0.04285 231 159 51 21
464 His other two wishes involved the dishes and the carpet. 1.4026 0.04415 231 162 45 24
465 Your aim is terrible. 1.4026 0.04013 231 153 63 15
466 I'm telling you, it was a typo! We're supposed to get the "leader," not the "leafer." 1.4026 0.04499 231 164 41 26
467 We really deserve some credit for the whole “leave no trace” thing. 1.4026 0.04241 231 158 53 20
468 Yeah, turns out most of the jobs on Space Force are lawn care. 1.4021 0.04484 189 126 50 13
469 Really?...All that advanced AI, and this is the best application you can come up with?! 1.4018 0.03998 224 147 64 13
470 Strange how our attempts at intimidation are only met with looks of appreciation. 1.4017 0.04176 229 155 56 18
471 Tomorrow, the earthlings give us offerings of cardboard and plastic. 1.4017 0.04176 229 155 56 18
472 You'd think he never saw illegal aliens with a leaf blower. 1.4017 0.04176 229 155 56 18
473 Hey, Scotty -- you missed. 1.4017 0.04399 229 160 46 23
474 I know it's wrong to tease dumb creatures but it's hilarious. 1.4017 0.04266 229 157 52 20
475 We checked his social media. The leaves are the intelligent life here. 1.4009 0.04267 222 151 53 18
476 After that probing, it is the least we can do. 1.4009 0.04408 222 154 47 21
477 Poor things. It’s the least we can do for them in 2020 1.3982 0.04081 221 147 60 14
478 Leaves? I have a nagging wife and two rotten kids,and you take my leaves? 1.3981 0.04493 216 151 44 21
479 Can you take me too? 1.3973 0.04236 224 153 53 18
480 Are you sure that's what they use for money? 1.3973 0.04189 224 152 55 17
481 We don't make enough on these small jobs to be worth the travel. 1.3973 0.04092 224 150 59 15
482 You realize you’ll be getting a shirt that says, “My parents travelled to Earth and all they brought back were some lousy leaves” 1.3973 0.04421 224 157 45 22
483 I use it as garnish. 1.3964 0.04165 222 150 56 16
484 You’ll understand after you jump into them. 1.3964 0.04066 222 148 60 14
485 Let's have a salad first. 1.3964 0.04066 222 148 60 14
486 I said I wanted to leave the planet, not I wanted planet's leaves. 1.3964 0.04357 222 154 48 20
487 The Instacart order said Leafy Greens, but red and yellow is probably fine. 1.3964 0.04403 222 155 46 21
488 I’m starting to think he does not care that we are taking these. 1.3964 0.04214 222 151 54 17
489 Get as many as you can, everyone is stockpiling. 1.3964 0.04165 222 150 56 16
490 We come to take your jobs. 1.3964 0.04403 222 155 46 21
491 No, keep transmitting. I think he likes them. I mean why else would he be saving them in bags? 1.3955 0.04336 220 152 49 19
492 We’re out of toilet paper. 1.3955 0.04336 220 152 49 19
493 Don't forget to leave a tip and give us a review. 1.3955 0.04431 220 154 45 21
494 I know it's a long way to come, but nothing on Glurg makes that crunching sound under my feet. 1.3955 0.04524 220 156 41 23
495 He won't report this. Not worth the grief from his HOA. 1.3955 0.04384 220 153 47 20
496 I think we got all the intelligent ones. 1.3955 0.04115 220 150 54 16
497 I love this new contactless takeout. 1.3955 0.04140 220 148 57 15
498 Nice of him to fix appetizers . Do you think that he knows he is the main course? 1.3955 0.04384 220 153 47 20
499 So, some salad before the entrée? 1.3955 0.04336 220 152 49 19
500 Lawn services are one of the few occupations open to undocumented aliens. 1.3955 0.04336 220 152 49 19
501 We have taken control of their strategic stockpile. 1.3953 0.04408 215 149 47 19
502 It’s fine, nothing really surprises them anymore. 1.3953 0.04358 215 148 49 18
503 'Leader, leafer, what's the difference?' you said. 1.3945 0.04412 218 152 46 20
504 Hopefully, this is more useful than the dog poop. 1.3945 0.04315 218 150 50 18
505 Given your year it’s the least we can do 1.3945 0.04599 218 156 38 24
506 There are so many joys of planet ownership,but nobody tells you about the yard work. 1.3945 0.04114 218 146 58 14
507 After this year, it's the least we can do. 1.3945 0.04216 218 148 54 16
508 You do know they’re not the kind you’ve been smoking, right? 1.3945 0.04266 218 149 52 17
509 This species is a pushover. We take their same tribute every year and they never try to stop us. 1.3945 0.04216 218 148 54 16
510 Now just put them in his neighbors yard. Trust me, he’ll think it’s hilarious. 1.3945 0.04364 218 151 48 19
511 You couldn't have shown up an hour ago, before I raked them into a pile? 1.3944 0.05189 142 96 36 10
512 Want to clean up the place before we take over. 1.3944 0.04584 213 151 40 22
513 Another four billion yards' worth of leaves, and we'll have enough fuel to get back to Biazad'oorn. 1.3935 0.05376 155 110 29 16
514 These little creatures look more intelligent." 1.3934 0.04258 211 143 53 15
515 They must be important. He’s spent hours gathering them into a pile. 1.3934 0.04363 211 145 49 17
516 First, we build their trust. 1.3934 0.03985 211 138 63 10
517 This should convince him that we come as friends. 1.3934 0.04415 211 146 47 18
518 You brought the bong, right? 1.3934 0.04465 211 147 45 19
519 This should seem more surprising, but then again it’s 2020. 1.3934 0.04711 211 152 35 24
520 Next time, don’t forget the toilet paper. 1.3923 0.04443 209 145 46 18
521 I can't believe they throw the best part away. 1.3923 0.04339 209 143 50 16
522 Quit teasing. Zap him already. 1.3923 0.04596 209 148 40 21
523 We really need to work on your aim Bob. 1.3923 0.04231 209 141 54 14
524 Just be sure you don't get the big thing next to them. 1.3922 0.05014 153 104 38 11
525 This Yard Roomba should fly off the shelves, come Christmas. 1.3900 0.04415 200 137 48 15
526 I know we decided to go vegetarian, but he sure does look tasty! 1.3886 0.04253 211 144 52 15
527 Must be valuable if he's collecting them. 1.3886 0.04199 211 143 54 14
528 Don’t forget the human this time. 1.3886 0.04357 211 146 48 17
529 I'm hoping to get promoted to crop circles. 1.3881 0.04725 201 144 36 21
530 I'll be the one aiming the abductor beam from now on. 1.3881 0.04454 201 139 46 16
531 Look, it’s the least we could do after we probed him. 1.3876 0.04920 178 126 35 17
532 Now you’re just doing this because you know it annoys me, Bob. 1.3876 0.04855 178 125 37 16
533 Are you sure this makes up for all the kidnapping and anal probing? 1.3876 0.04385 209 145 47 17
534 Humans gather them. They must be valuable 1.3876 0.04333 209 144 49 16
535 No sign yet of intelligent life. 1.3876 0.04489 209 147 43 19
536 Clearly this lifeform is dominant... leave the servant. 1.3876 0.04540 209 148 41 20
537 The evolution of Roomba® 1.3876 0.04738 209 152 33 24
538 Not sure what they are, but he seems to care about them more than his children. 1.3874 0.05889 111 76 27 8
539 they must be valuable, he's working so hard to collect them! 1.3865 0.04361 207 143 48 16
540 Really, 21 light years getting here, and that's the best you can aim? 1.3856 0.04830 153 103 41 9
541 Careful! He’s holding some kind of weapon. 1.3854 0.04476 192 132 46 14
542 Don't take too many - we don't want to look greedy. 1.3854 0.04476 192 132 46 14
543 They must be valuable. All the earthlings gather them. 1.3854 0.04443 205 143 45 17
544 Leave him. Our directive was for intelligent life only. 1.3854 0.04334 205 141 49 15
545 Such care taken to collect them. They must be valuable 1.3854 0.04443 205 143 45 17
546 What do you mean? If they weren't valuable, why would he be collecting them? 1.3854 0.04443 205 143 45 17
547 I can't wait to put them the neighbors yard! 1.3854 0.04279 205 140 51 14
548 If only he knew how valuable this stuff is. 1.3854 0.04222 205 139 53 13
549 This stuff is ok, it’s the yellow snow we have to avoid! 1.3851 0.05297 148 104 31 13
550 This will have to do. It's not my fault we pulled over at the only planet with no toilet paper. 1.3851 0.04989 161 112 36 13
551 After all that probing, it’s the least we could do. 1.3851 0.04911 161 111 38 12
552 When they talk about us, they never focus on the public service. 1.3850 0.04174 200 134 55 11
553 They must be quite precious. Almost all earthlings collect them. 1.3850 0.04351 200 137 49 14
554 I believe this is their currency. I recall an earthen commentary about money growing on their trees. 1.3850 0.04465 200 139 45 16
555 Look, I don't mind the drinking, but when it affects your aim, it's a problem. 1.3850 0.04409 200 138 47 15
556 Zungdor! We’ve been in quarantine on this spaceship for 1,349 years, if you’re making leaves for dinner again I’m leaving! 1.3850 0.04351 200 137 49 14
557 We migrated 5 million light years and the only job you could find was landscaping? 1.3850 0.04521 200 140 43 17
558 I hate it when illegal aliens steal my job. 1.3850 0.04631 200 142 39 19
559 Just cloning these for oxygen on our planet. Ciao. 1.3850 0.04521 200 140 43 17
560 I said it's time to LEAVE... 1.3842 0.04473 203 142 44 17
561 We’ll come back later and drop them in his gutters 1.3842 0.04191 203 137 54 12
562 These humanoids seem to value these crisp objects. They are gathered in large payment bags and turned in. 1.3842 0.04473 203 142 44 17
563 We need get that directional abduction beam fixed. 1.3842 0.04527 203 143 42 18
564 You want to tell him the HOA outsourced lawn maintenance to us, or you want to scare him some more? 1.3842 0.04133 203 136 56 11
565 I can't believe they still rely on oil instead of leaves. 1.3842 0.04527 203 143 42 18
566 Having failed to find intelligent life on Earth, the visitors opted for mulch. 1.3842 0.04580 203 144 40 19
567 Like taking candy from a baby. 1.3842 0.04580 203 144 40 19
568 When it comes to fall clean-up, we're light years ahead!" 1.3842 0.04633 203 145 38 20
569 I know, I know, but the blower setting is even nosier. 1.3838 0.04495 198 138 44 16
570 Seriously. How much potpourri do we need? 1.3838 0.04495 198 138 44 16
571 Curbside pickup is so convenient. 1.3836 0.04952 159 110 37 12
572 Harvesting brains was fun, but what’ll really save our planet is composting. 1.3831 0.04391 201 139 47 15
573 These must be valuable since they spend so much time collecting them. 1.3831 0.04217 201 136 53 12
574 While earth was rife with COVID-19, global warming, a sagging economy, & unrivaled political strife, a small cadre of eco-friendly aliens known as "The Greater Good" secretly composted yard waste to fuel their imminent invasion. 1.3830 0.05072 188 139 26 23
575 Leave him. 1.3827 0.04227 196 132 53 11
576 Can we add a loud, whining noise? 1.3827 0.04468 196 136 45 15
577 you missed... 1.3827 0.04584 196 138 41 17
578 our order was to 'leave' 1.3827 0.04696 196 140 37 19
579 If they aren't valuable, why would they spend so much effort collecting them? 1.3827 0.04102 196 130 57 9
580 My aim is fine. Her Eminence said signs of intelligent life. 1.3827 0.04584 196 138 41 17
581 Illegal aliens still do the best yard work. 1.3827 0.04640 196 139 39 18
582 It's the least we can do after abducting his family. 1.3827 0.04165 196 131 55 10
583 How nice of their leader to organize them for us. 1.3827 0.04289 196 133 51 12
584 Let's scatter these back around the yard and see what he does. 1.3827 0.04409 196 135 47 14
585 Aren't you glad we're stocking up on more toilet paper? 1.3827 0.04349 196 134 49 13
586 He'll still claim to have done all the work 1.3827 0.04289 196 133 51 12
587 Thank god for contactless pickup 1.3827 0.04807 196 142 33 21
588 It's written right here, 'take me to your...' ,oh wait that's a 'd' 1.3819 0.05307 144 101 31 12
589 It's the stolen Trump votes! 1.3817 0.04634 186 130 41 15
590 We come all the way here for takeout, and all you get is the salad? 1.3814 0.04317 194 132 50 12
591 If they weren't valuable, Zorag, why would they gather them in piles? 1.3814 0.04191 194 130 54 10
592 We've travelled light-years to take in the autumn foliage... Now what? 1.3814 0.04616 194 137 40 17
593 Wow, the folks at Total Landscaping have really expanded their operation since the election. 1.3814 0.04897 194 142 30 22
594 They must be valuable, why else would he gather them? 1.3802 0.03951 192 125 61 6
595 I am not sure this is as impressive as crop circles and pyramids. 1.3802 0.04590 192 135 41 16
596 Nice aim, Larry. 1.3802 0.04345 192 131 49 12
597 2002: “What the hell?” 2020: “Yeah, this makes sense.” 1.3784 0.04833 185 133 34 18
598 He says he wants to pay US. 1.3784 0.04710 185 131 38 16
599 Don’t feel bad. No one passes their abductor’s license on the first try. 1.3784 0.04584 185 129 42 14
600 Oh good - I love carryout! 1.3784 0.04453 185 127 46 12
601 I’ve heard humans hate when aliens come in and take their jobs 1.3784 0.04584 185 129 42 14
602 We place them in the adjoining yard, and leave the Earthling to explain. War will ensue. 1.3777 0.04531 188 131 43 14
603 I'm just happy we could give Mikey a pleasant response from his 3rd grade wish list. 1.3774 0.05022 159 112 34 13
604 We've acquired one of the species' carefully constructed nests. 1.3770 0.04602 191 135 40 16
605 Don't worry man, we'll return them tomorrow! 1.3768 0.05364 138 97 30 11
606 Clearly, this Earthling prefers to store these in his gutters. 1.3763 0.04811 186 134 34 18
607 Maybe we should go back to crop circles... 1.3763 0.04627 186 131 40 15
608 When I said, “suck it up,” I didn’t mean that pile of leaves. 1.3763 0.04563 186 130 42 14
609 Their instructions were: If an Earthling ever sees you, take leave" 1.3763 0.04689 186 132 38 16
610 Don't you wish that they'd separate them by color? 1.3763 0.04434 186 128 46 12
611 Disregard the pile by his dog. 1.3763 0.04751 186 133 36 17
612 Yeah, we got the humans. Next time we'll pick up that creepy thing. 1.3763 0.04550 194 137 41 16
613 They must be important, everyone here is gathering them into huge piles. 1.3763 0.04371 194 134 47 13
614 Well, in the part of our planet where I'M from, they're considered a delicacy! 1.3763 0.04119 194 130 55 9
615 Great leaf vacuum. Now my wife will want one too. 1.3763 0.04609 194 138 39 17
616 OK, we've done your leaves. Now take us to your leader." 1.3763 0.04609 194 138 39 17
617 Then we dump it in the neighbor's yard. That's when the fun starts. 1.3763 0.04491 194 136 43 15
618 He thinks we are being funny. Wait until he sees the bill. 1.3763 0.04432 194 135 45 14
619 Now we put them in the neighbor's yard. 1.3763 0.03987 194 128 59 7
620 They gather them into big piles and collect them in bags. I think it's their money. 1.3763 0.04609 194 138 39 17
621 They might believe it until he tells them about the leaves part 1.3763 0.04609 194 138 39 17
622 I said ‘hover’, not ‘hoover’! 1.3763 0.04550 194 137 41 16
623 ...And Ned never drank again. 1.3758 0.05224 157 113 29 15
624 Take us to your weeder. 1.3750 0.04641 192 137 38 17
625 I'll bet we can get $1000 apiece for these back home. 1.3750 0.04210 192 130 52 10
626 They're the only useful things for miles." 1.3750 0.05182 152 108 31 13
627 I wonder if I should tell them that my kids are at the bottom of the pile. 1.3750 0.04522 192 135 42 15
628 I know we said we wouldn't interfere, but I can't stand an unkempt yard. 1.3750 0.04462 192 134 44 14
629 Now we must take our leaves 1.3750 0.04522 192 135 42 15
630 He acts like we are doing him a favor. 1.3750 0.04700 192 138 36 18
631 That's not what I meant when I said bag'em. 1.3750 0.04400 192 133 46 13
632 Take the leaves. The human’s not wearing a mask. 1.3750 0.04582 192 136 40 16
633 It’s 2020 - earthlings need a little help 1.3750 0.04400 192 133 46 13
634 I told you we needed more toilet paper before we left. 1.3742 0.04942 155 108 36 11
635 I still can't belive Space Force let us out of Area 51 only to charge us with "forest management" when we have the technology to stop climate change. 1.3742 0.05427 155 114 24 17
636 This is the ultimate sign of peace. Do this and they will eat out of your hand. 1.3741 0.05429 139 99 28 12
637 We go through this on every trip: we hover, you collect useless local trinkets, and then we schlepp them back to the house and you try to make an art project which you end up tossing out. Every trip. 1.3737 0.04367 190 131 47 12
638 This is the least we could do to make up for the probing 1.3733 0.05228 150 107 30 13
639 By the way the human collects them, they must be a very valuable resource. 1.3730 0.04311 185 126 49 10
640 Watch him try to explain this one. 1.3730 0.04445 185 128 45 12
641 Finally, Alexa did something useful. 1.3729 0.05747 118 83 26 9
642 Did you bring rolling papers? 1.3725 0.05069 153 108 33 12
643 Take me to your cedar.” 1.3723 0.04460 188 131 44 13
644 You’re hired! Just have to get around the whole “illegals” thing. 1.3723 0.04586 188 133 40 15
645 Of course they're valuable, he spent a whole season growing them, now he's raking in the profits. 1.3723 0.04460 188 131 44 13
646 Maybe now he won't be mad that we landed on his trash cans. 1.3723 0.04768 188 136 34 18
647 Can you believe they are giving those away for free? 1.3723 0.04586 188 133 40 15
648 That's not what I meant by 'Put him out of his misery'. 1.3723 0.04828 188 137 32 19
649 This isn’t what I meant by the Fall of mankind. 1.3723 0.04460 188 131 44 13
650 Ha ! No, we're the other guys actually — From the Galactic Federation Total Landscaping 1.3723 0.04648 188 134 38 16
651 They must be valuable. He is collecting them. 1.3716 0.04724 148 100 41 7
652 I thought he'd put up more of a fight. 1.3716 0.04673 183 130 38 15
653 This may be a sign of intelligent life since they're so intent on eradicating it. 1.3716 0.04673 183 130 38 15
654 Damn autocorrect...I said "leader" not "leafer" 1.3716 0.04673 183 130 38 15
655 Stupid humans. They make it so easy to steal their biofuel. 1.3716 0.04673 183 130 38 15
656 Amazon does pickups too. 1.3716 0.04340 183 125 48 10
657 I think I found all the missing ballots. 1.3716 0.04543 183 128 42 13
658 Did you remember the iron and the wax paper? 1.3716 0.04608 183 129 40 14
659 Stop it. They call them "leaves" for a reason. 1.3716 0.04737 183 131 36 16
660 Crop circles are so cliché. 1.3716 0.04409 183 126 46 11
661 Knock yourself out, Scotty 1.3716 0.04409 183 126 46 11
662 Do you have a ship that cuts grass? 1.3716 0.04737 183 131 36 16
663 I can't eat just one! 1.3716 0.04673 183 130 38 15
664 Sure, it would be fun to take him, but our assignment isn’t people. It’s mulch. 1.3716 0.04409 183 126 46 11
665 Sure, now that I’ve done the hard part. 1.3716 0.04608 183 129 40 14
666 The search for intelligent life on earth goes on. 1.3716 0.04340 183 125 48 10
667 they’re dead you know 1.3716 0.04476 183 127 44 12
668 On their planet, everything is disposable. 1.3714 0.05301 140 99 30 11
669 Humans are more receptive to the probe after receiving assistance with mundane domestic tasks. 1.3710 0.04555 186 131 41 14
670 How charming! The hors d'oeuvres are being provided by the main course! 1.3710 0.04923 186 137 29 20
671 Careful! There's a no-burn ordinance in this town. 1.3710 0.04426 186 129 45 12
672 The farmer doesn’t look too upset that we’re stealing his crop. 1.3710 0.04426 186 129 45 12
673 Calculations indicate that we now have enough for the jump-on pile. 1.3710 0.04293 186 127 49 10
674 Sure - grab the Earthling and his magic stick too. 1.3710 0.04864 186 136 31 19
675 The manifest says hover, not hoover, near the earthling. 1.3710 0.04681 186 133 37 16
676 Explain to me why you’ll pick up his lawn, but we gotta pay Gary to do ours. 1.3710 0.04681 186 133 37 16
677 Does it spark joy? 1.3710 0.04804 186 135 33 18
678 Nah, I don’t think this will make the news. It’s not special enough for 2020. 1.3710 0.04681 186 133 37 16
679 Word around the galaxy is that this drives them crazy. 1.3709 0.04938 151 105 36 10
680 At last! Our toilet paper troubles are over! 1.3709 0.05367 151 110 26 15
681 Maybe they're an acquired taste? 1.3702 0.04575 181 127 41 13
682 Aim higher. 1.3702 0.04153 181 121 53 7
683 It's part of the rebrand: Unidentified Friendly Object. 1.3702 0.04439 181 125 45 11
684 Easiest light-year of community service ever! 1.3702 0.04369 181 124 47 10
685 Wait until he gets our bill. 1.3702 0.04334 181 131 37 13
686 Scottie,did he say leaves or Me? 1.3702 0.04772 181 130 35 16
687 Are we almost done refueling? 1.3702 0.04707 181 129 37 15
688 I know you feel bad for them, but you can’t miss on purpose 1.3702 0.04575 181 127 41 13
689 We are supposed to hover around,not hoover! 1.3701 0.05126 154 110 31 13
690 It'll all make sense when you see his face in the morning and they're everywhere again. 1.3694 0.05055 157 112 32 13
691 I'm sure this is what they meant when they told us to leave earth the way you found it. 1.3694 0.04633 157 107 42 8
692 We must study the "leaf mound" ritual. 1.3692 0.05475 130 92 28 10
693 Our directive was to turn over every leaf in our search for intelligent life” 1.3691 0.04980 149 104 35 10
694 We must learn how they control the ones with the rakes. 1.3691 0.05159 149 106 31 12
695 *whispers* takemetakemetakeme 1.3691 0.04935 149 108 29 12
696 After giving him that full body probe, I think it’s the least we can do. 1.3691 0.05246 149 107 29 13
697 Is this your first mission? 1.3691 0.05071 149 105 33 11
698 You've set it to abduct, not blow. 1.3691 0.04888 149 103 37 9
699 Get in loser, we’re colonizing 1.3687 0.04808 179 129 34 16
700 And I thought a leaf blower was high-tech! 1.3687 0.04676 179 127 38 14
701 Can you come earlier next time 1.3687 0.04540 179 125 42 12
702 What did I tell you about braking too soon? 1.3684 0.05254 152 110 28 14
703 We come in Greenpeace. 1.3684 0.05171 152 109 30 13
704 You think we would get a simple thank you instead of a blank stare. 1.3677 0.04579 155 105 43 7
705 When you said 'Leave it to me', this is not what I was expecting. 1.3677 0.04931 155 109 35 11
706 Why would they all collect them if they didn't have tremendous value? 1.3677 0.04579 155 105 43 7
707 The new "John Deere Tractor Beam". 1.3677 0.04758 155 107 39 9
708 Wait! Let me get the recycling! 1.3676 0.05199 136 95 32 9
709 Are you sure you don't need glasses? 1.3673 0.05206 147 105 30 12
710 This is the most intelligent life we've found so far! 1.3672 0.04845 177 128 33 16
711 I've found that they accept us more willingly as their overlords if we do this first. 1.3672 0.04642 177 125 39 13
712 Where were you when I was cleaning the gutters? 1.3672 0.04051 177 131 38 8
713 The way they're being stockpiled, they MUST be valuable 1.3672 0.04430 177 125 41 11
714 Perfect, we were out of toilet paper anyway. 1.3672 0.04430 177 122 45 10
715 The way he collects them like that...they must be very valuable. 1.3672 0.05532 128 91 27 10
716 They must be very valuable since the humans spend hours and hours gathering them. 1.3672 0.05532 128 91 27 10
717 Yeah, they think it's waste. They even pile it up for us! 1.3672 0.05419 128 90 29 9
718 Lucky we got here in time before his partner with the crazy leaf machine gun came. 1.3672 0.05419 128 90 29 9
719 Must be of great societal value. The Humanoids are most intent on gathering them. 1.3672 0.05642 128 92 25 11
720 I can’t wait to see Junior and his friend’s reaction... this is going to be the biggest leaf pile in the galaxy! 1.3672 0.05642 128 92 25 11
721 We found these ballots. 1.3667 0.05550 150 112 21 17
722 This'll be good . .while he's doing an Aunt Teefa tweet, we put em back . . . 1.3664 0.05332 131 92 30 9
723 Okay. Next gesture of benevolence, let's return his overdue library books. 1.3660 0.04885 153 107 36 10
724 Got room on the docket come plowing time? 1.3660 0.05058 153 109 32 12
725 Just admit that you took us to the wrong white house's lawn. 1.3660 0.04885 153 107 36 10
726 Aliens are stealing our jobs 1.3657 0.04677 175 124 38 13
727 I want just the red ones. 1.3657 0.04534 175 122 42 11
728 See you next week, we'll email you the invoice. 1.3657 0.04677 175 124 38 13
729 Of course they’re precious. They’re all gathering them. 1.3657 0.04076 175 116 54 5
730 Where were you 20 minutes ago when the whole yard was full of leaves? 1.3657 0.04677 175 124 38 13
731 I said ‘leave’ not leaves. 1.3657 0.04606 175 123 40 12
732 We come from Planet Roomba.... 1.3657 0.04815 175 126 34 15
733 You missed him! Try again. 1.3657 0.04534 175 122 42 11
734 I tell you, on my last visit they were burning them. 1.3657 0.04606 175 123 40 12
735 This drives them even crazier than what we normally do to them. 1.3657 0.04461 175 121 44 10
736 Earthlings all look alike to me. 1.3657 0.04746 175 125 36 14
737 First, we gain their trust by helping them with annoying tasks. 1.3657 0.04461 175 121 44 10
738 You could have charged him more than twenty bucks. 1.3657 0.04606 175 123 40 12
739 Don't bother with next door; they don't believe in UFOs 1.3657 0.04534 175 122 42 11
740 Sorry, Earthling, but the Cosmos needs compost. 1.3657 0.04606 175 123 40 12
741 They're so primitive. They still shovel snow too. 1.3657 0.04534 175 124 39 12
742 While you're up there, can you do the gutters? 1.3657 0.04461 175 121 44 10
743 Are you sure it says intelligent "leaf" form? 1.3657 0.04534 175 122 42 11
744 You idiot! I said pick the Canadian Maple Leafs" 1.3657 0.04746 175 125 36 14
745 Rookie mistake. 1.3657 0.04606 175 123 40 12
746 A little to your right. 1.3657 0.04677 175 124 38 13
747 Better not be any dog turds in there this time 1.3657 0.04815 175 126 34 15
748 Dang it, wrong button. 1.3657 0.04534 175 122 42 11
749 This will be much less fun to probe but we need the compost. 1.3657 0.04677 175 124 38 13
750 It seemed that 2020 was to be Ed’s year after all. 1.3657 0.04949 175 128 30 17
751 Roswell Intergalactic Landscaping, Since 1947 1.3657 0.04606 175 123 40 12
752 I forgot, he also wants an estimate for cleaning the gutters 1.3657 0.04461 175 121 44 10
753 You are SO bad at this. 1.3655 0.05254 145 104 29 12
754 There’s a chihuahua two doors down. 1.3655 0.05344 145 105 27 13
755 ‘Here take a photo of me helping the ape-sapien for my dating profile’ 1.3651 0.05357 126 88 30 8
756 I just like seeing that “you-saved-me-a-day’s-worth-of-yard-work” look on their faces before switching to “death ray” mode. 1.3642 0.05356 151 111 25 15
757 For once,Ned was right to claim that aliens took his job. 1.3642 0.05188 151 109 29 13
758 Putting the Tesla logo on the ship was genius!! 1.3642 0.05015 151 107 33 11
759 Admit it. Isn't this nicer than crop circles? 1.3642 0.05102 151 108 31 12
760 A fine species! They seem to be served by their slave creature cleaning up after them. 1.3642 0.05102 151 108 31 12
761 Trust me, they’re crispiest this time of year. 1.3642 0.04744 151 104 39 8
762 You had one job Zornak! You can't even aim the tractor beam! 1.3642 0.05188 151 109 29 13
763 Suburbanites are always impressed with a Beamer! 1.3642 0.04852 173 125 33 15
764 Remember it's my turn to say "take me to your leader" 1.3642 0.04493 173 120 43 10
765 The new neighbors were odd, but their lawn service was out of this world. 1.3642 0.04493 173 122 40 11
766 Next year, we’re visiting in the summer. 1.3642 0.04989 173 127 29 17
767 It's worth the trip just to see the look on their faces! 1.3642 0.04712 173 123 37 13
768 This is your idea of helping humanity? 1.3642 0.04567 173 121 41 11
769 I can't wait to see the look on the little zorks' faces when they jump into these! 1.3642 0.04567 173 121 41 11
770 Of course they have great value! Everyone is gathering them. 1.3642 0.04493 173 120 43 10
771 I want to take some home for the boys to play in. 1.3642 0.04417 173 119 45 9
772 He keeps collecting them. They've got to be worth something! 1.3642 0.04493 173 120 43 10
773 He'll look even more surprised after he sees us blow them back into his front yard. 1.3642 0.04712 173 123 37 13
774 Remember what we've learned: to impress them, we gather, but to satisfy them, we must release in the neighbor's yard. 1.3642 0.04712 173 123 37 13
775 They call them 'leaves', I call them 'takes' 1.3642 0.04712 173 123 37 13
776 Must be valuable as they all collect it 1.3642 0.04567 173 121 41 11
777 The suction looked faster on the commercial. 1.3642 0.04417 173 119 45 9
778 Keep those things away from me. Once I eat one, I can't stop eating them. 1.3642 0.04340 173 118 47 8
779 Next, maybe he’ll let us whitewash the fence. 1.3642 0.04852 173 125 33 15
780 Take the rake too. 1.3642 0.04712 173 123 37 13
781 Just a little more to the right 1.3642 0.04102 173 115 53 5
782 Watch his reaction when we send back snow 1.3642 0.04567 173 121 41 11
783 Do you also do snow plowing? 1.3636 0.04724 176 126 36 14
784 Presentable. Maybe cute. But not rakishly handsome. 1.3630 0.05132 146 104 31 11
785 Every Fall the humanoids pile these up as an offering 1.3626 0.04674 171 121 38 12
786 These must be really valuable... all the humans are collecting them. 1.3626 0.04674 171 121 38 12
787 There just aren't many vegan options for an alien in this town. 1.3626 0.04525 171 119 42 10
788 The humans put a lot of time and energy in gathering these multi-colored items, so they must be of great value. 1.3626 0.04600 171 120 40 11
789 I heard they are the most intelligent life-form on this planet." 1.3626 0.04819 171 123 34 14
790 When they’re in season, I hear these are both crunchy and tasty. 1.3626 0.04448 171 118 44 9
791 Tree droppings must be very valuable -- he spent his whole weekend collecting them." 1.3626 0.04448 171 118 44 9
792 Didn’t you ask for the intelligent life? 1.3626 0.04448 171 118 44 9
793 When are we gonna start doing crop circles instead? 1.3626 0.04600 171 120 40 11
794 No Flurgon, I said, “We must take leave.” 1.3626 0.04748 171 122 36 13
795 Why do WE have to clear up Area 51? 1.3626 0.04674 171 121 38 12
796 Emphasizing our usefulness is the path to acceptance." 1.3624 0.04968 149 105 34 10
797 Sometimes ya just gotta suck it up. 1.3624 0.05059 149 106 32 11
798 This time Let’s put them on the other side of the fence 1.3624 0.04876 149 104 36 9
799 Can we get pumpkin spice lattes next!? 1.3624 0.04968 149 105 34 10
800 It's galling how they treat their dead relatives. 1.3622 0.05553 127 91 26 10
801 It's only right since last year we took his wife and dog. 1.3609 0.04635 169 119 39 11
802 Why can’t you just ask for directions without making it all so awkward 1.3609 0.04635 169 119 39 11
803 I said ray gun, not rake gun. 1.3609 0.04635 169 119 39 11
804 This is nice of you but we're still going to probe him, right? 1.3602 0.04790 161 114 36 11
805 Relax, I did the same thing on my first alien abduction. 1.3602 0.04790 161 114 36 11
806 It's for the wife. She's a potpourri fiend. 1.3602 0.04949 161 116 32 13
807 Next time bring more toilet paper. 1.3593 0.04746 167 119 36 12
808 After that probe it's the least we could do. 1.3590 0.07061 78 56 16 6
809 His friends are going to think he's crazy. 1.3590 0.04977 156 112 32 12
810 and then we drop them over the fence 1.3590 0.04977 156 112 32 12
811 Would anyone like meat with their salad? 1.3590 0.05141 156 114 28 14
812 Do you think he'll rake them a third time? 1.3590 0.05060 156 113 30 13
813 Not having to bag leaves...totally worth the occasional probe 1.3590 0.04893 156 113 31 12
814 Gardeners of the Galaxy 1.3580 0.04432 162 111 44 7
815 While you're at it grab his weapon! 1.3576 0.04626 165 116 39 10
816 Wow, the leaf pick up service this year is out of this world! 1.3571 0.04871 168 122 32 14
817 Sure,it was nice of him to help but we aren’t giving him a ride . 1.3571 0.04934 154 110 33 11
818 Don't worry, honey. Nobody gets it right the first time. 1.3571 0.04934 154 110 33 11
819 Do they have our price for snow removal too? 1.3571 0.04569 168 118 40 10
820 Wait until you see what happens when we dump them in his neighbor's yard! 1.3571 0.05019 154 111 31 12
821 Decisions. Decisions. Vegan or Human. 1.3567 0.04664 171 122 37 12
822 What I hate is taking over a messy planet 1.3567 0.04737 171 123 35 13
823 Thanks, next can you guys take care of the litter box? 1.3567 0.04737 171 123 35 13
824 The humans make these offerings every year 1.3562 0.04635 146 100 40 6
825 Yeah I know, but can you imagine the look on people's faces when he tells them what happened? 1.3562 0.05211 146 106 28 12
826 The experiment is to see how many times he’ll rake the leaves after we dump them in front of him. 1.3562 0.05211 146 106 28 12
827 When did you become a vegetarian? 1.3562 0.05119 146 105 30 11
828 What can I say? The jobs available to illegal aliens are quite limited. 1.3562 0.05211 146 106 28 12
829 Those things must have high value if he’s collecting them. 1.3562 0.05119 146 105 30 11
830 ...Cuz they’ll burn ‘em and ruin the climate of our new planet. That’s why! 1.3562 0.04931 146 103 34 9
831 You idiot! I wanted the rake. 1.3562 0.04931 146 103 34 9
832 These must be valuable if Earthlings spend so much time collecting them. 1.3562 0.05026 146 104 32 10
833 Maybe we ought to switch to foliage fuels? 1.3562 0.05211 146 106 28 12
834 Shouldn’t we have just given them our COVID-19 vaccines instead of agreeing to help with their yard work last year? 1.3562 0.05211 146 106 28 12
835 This really sucks. 1.3557 0.04955 149 106 33 10
836 Oh yeah, this is definitely what we came for. 1.3556 0.05094 135 95 32 8
837 As long as they think I did it... 1.3554 0.05487 121 86 27 8
838 Have faith. We're real. Seeing is beleaving. 1.3553 0.05062 152 110 30 12
839 Never tell these people how much this stuff is worth on our planet. 1.3553 0.04887 152 108 34 10
840 They said to leave no trace! 1.3553 0.04975 152 109 32 11
841 We must discover what they live on in their three other seasons. 1.3550 0.04699 169 121 36 12
842 It's only a seasonal job, but in a pandemic, you take what you can get. 1.3550 0.04624 169 120 38 11
843 I'm just screwing with him. 1.3550 0.04308 169 116 46 7
844 And you're sure you lost your keys here? 1.3550 0.04624 169 120 38 11
845 I just love these fall colors 1.3550 0.04847 169 123 32 14
846 Now try for the big one. 1.3542 0.05070 144 103 31 10
847 Nice shot eagle eye 1.3542 0.05350 144 106 25 13
848 Are you sure those are their brains? 1.3542 0.05258 144 105 27 12
849 The new neighbors seem nice. 1.3542 0.05070 144 103 31 10
850 Looking for intelligent life. 1.3542 0.05165 144 104 29 11
851 'Illegal aliens take local jobs' 1.3542 0.04875 144 101 35 8
852 They fall for it every time. Watch his expression change when he zap him up. 1.3540 0.04613 161 113 39 9
853 Go ahead. Suck it up. 1.3537 0.05181 147 107 28 12
854 "Start a cloud-based business" they said. "It'll be fun," they said. 1.3537 0.05090 147 106 30 11
855 Make the universe rake again! 1.3537 0.04998 147 105 32 10
856 I'm not sure what these are, but considering how much effort he was putting into gathering them they must be extremely valuable. 1.3537 0.04998 147 105 32 10
857 What part of "anal probe" was confusing to you? 1.3534 0.05358 133 96 27 10
858 I bet he does not believe in vaccines either 1.3533 0.05193 150 110 27 13
859 I said a little to your right 1.3533 0.05193 150 110 27 13
860 They must be valuable. The humans are all gathering them 1.3533 0.04743 150 105 37 8
861 The tall ones have all been idiots. Let's try the crumpled brown ones. 1.3533 0.04743 150 105 37 8
862 These poor primitives have no idea how valuable those are. 1.3533 0.05018 150 108 31 11
863 Yep, and then we just dump them on your neighbor's lawn. 1.3533 0.05106 150 109 29 12
864 Hang on, Carl. This one saw us. Now we have to find another planet to deposit our leaves. 1.3533 0.05018 150 108 31 11
865 That wasn’t the mess we needed cleaned up but ok. 1.3533 0.05106 150 109 29 12
866 These are good but I prefer the Nacho Cheese flavored 1.3533 0.04501 167 117 41 9
867 He's just going to throw these away. 1.3533 0.04811 167 121 33 13
868 The orders were: "Take his wife and leave." Not "leaves". 1.3533 0.04885 167 122 31 14
869 I think it’s something to with the Make America Rake Again campaign 1.3533 0.04885 167 122 31 14
870 We will easily win the support of their suburban men. 1.3533 0.04658 167 119 37 11
871 Hmm. Maybe they remove Trump too, while they're at it. 1.3533 0.04885 167 122 31 14
872 Our instructions were to gather samples of whatever they seem to hoard. 1.3533 0.04420 167 116 43 8
873 They must be valuable. The lifeforms keep collecting them. 1.3533 0.04735 167 120 35 12
874 Strange. He seems happy that we take the stuff he carefully collected 1.3533 0.04501 167 117 41 9
875 We may need to dangle live bait; the humans are attracted to these, but they just won’t bite. 1.3533 0.04958 167 123 29 15
876 Yes, I'm sure these are the intelligent life form. 1.3533 0.04501 167 117 41 9
877 I hope to move into abductions soon. 1.3533 0.04658 167 119 37 11
878 That look is called 'abduction envy'. 1.3533 0.05172 167 126 23 18
879 Do you think this is enough for my intergalactic “Assisting the Human” wilderness merit badge? 1.3533 0.04811 167 124 30 13
880 Just wear your glasses 1.3522 0.04979 159 116 30 13
881 I think we’re supposed to be dropping off leaflets, not picking them up. 1.3519 0.04673 162 115 37 10
882 His wife will never believe it. 1.3515 0.04533 165 116 40 9
883 He was piling them up, they must be important! 1.3515 0.04694 165 118 36 11
884 Always bring back the most evolved life forms. 1.3515 0.04848 165 120 32 13
885 Smart move, Xpze. You just bought us two light years in quarantine. 1.3515 0.04772 165 119 34 12
886 He's going to be really happy when we bring them back in the spring. 1.3515 0.04614 165 117 38 10
887 Now let's prank those humans by dumping it on Mars. 1.3515 0.04772 165 119 34 12
888 He would also like us to take his wife on a one-way mission. 1.3515 0.04574 165 123 29 13
889 Well, I guess they told us illegal aliens would be taking our jobs... 1.3515 0.04614 165 117 38 10
890 That human seems to be all out of those little brown things they compete to gather into large piles. As a gesture of goodwill, let's give him these. 1.3515 0.04533 165 116 40 9
891 The real money is in snow removal. 1.3515 0.04772 165 119 34 12
892 Do you usually leave a tip? 1.3515 0.04772 165 119 34 12
893 Good aim. Make sure you only capture the intelligent life forms. 1.3515 0.05072 165 123 26 16
894 They are small yet they have large slaves! 1.3515 0.04772 165 119 34 12
895 Yeah I know the work is seasonal, but hopefully it'll get us thru the pandemic. 1.3515 0.04848 165 120 32 13
896 Can we please just visit without your tidying? 1.3515 0.04772 165 119 34 12
897 I got a shit load of empty beer cans if you want them too . 1.3515 0.04848 165 120 32 13
898 Looks like the gig economy has gone intergalactic. 1.3515 0.04848 165 120 32 13
899 He said his name is Tom Sawyer and that this material is very valuable on this planet. 1.3515 0.05216 165 125 22 18
900 While you're at it, don't forget to take 2020 away too 1.3515 0.04848 165 120 32 13
901 OK, and now put them all on the other side of the fence. Thanks! 1.3515 0.04924 165 121 30 14
902 Should we tell him we’re just paying it forward? 1.3515 0.04533 165 116 40 9
903 They collect them every year, it's some kind of obsession. 1.3515 0.04451 165 115 42 8
904 forget one monolith, and we get put on trash duty. SMH. 1.3515 0.05072 165 123 26 16
905 At least this beats our last assignment cleaning up at the dog park. 1.3514 0.05240 148 109 26 13
906 Not the leaves, the human! 1.3514 0.04970 148 106 32 10
907 I’m warning you. It’s fool’s gold. 1.3514 0.05327 148 110 24 14
908 Next scatter it on the grass box of the other human and observe the compulsive sorting behavior! They never cease! Fascinating! 1.3514 0.05327 148 110 24 14
909 Are you sure he'll pay in Bitcoin? 1.3514 0.04876 148 105 34 9
910 Poor guy. Let's help out and put them back on the tree. 1.3514 0.05240 148 109 26 13
911 This gains their confidence. They think we are here to help them. 1.3514 0.04876 148 105 34 9
912 These "leaves" are clearly the superior species—see how they dominate the lesser beings? 1.3514 0.04876 148 105 34 9
913 He doesn't seem to mind. 1.3514 0.04970 148 106 32 10
914 Look at him…you’d think that this was the best thing that ever happened to him this year. 1.3514 0.05327 148 110 24 14
915 I don’t think that’s what the boss meant when he said “gather the fall of man” 1.3514 0.05151 148 108 28 12
916 Perhaps a sample will help us determine why the small scavenger organism collects the waste of the tall green organism. 1.3506 0.04921 154 111 32 11
917 I know we're illegal aliens , that's why we're doing this job for free 1.3506 0.05255 154 115 24 15
918 Stop, you'll spoil your appetite. You know we're having dinner in the Crab Nebula. 1.3506 0.04655 154 110 35 9
919 Here's the leaf vacuum you ordered from Amazon Prime. 1.3506 0.05091 154 113 28 13
920 Now, that’s what I call outsourcing. 1.3506 0.05174 154 114 26 14
921 They pile it up and burn it. It has to be worth something. 1.3506 0.04746 154 109 36 9
922 Whatever you do,do NOT take the humans until they're vaccinated. 1.3506 0.05007 154 112 30 12
923 Alright, but this is the last pile. You haven’t done anything with the leaves you pressed last year and we’re running out of encyclopedias. 1.3506 0.04921 154 111 32 11
924 We’re blowing our cover for this?” “Just wait, you’ll see how fun it is to jump in them. 1.3506 0.04655 154 108 38 8
925 The things my kids will do to get out of chores 1.3506 0.05007 154 112 30 12
926 And Donald says they all count. 1.3503 0.05259 157 118 23 16
927 Leave the human, he could be infected 1.3500 0.04873 160 116 32 12
928 It is a welcome change from crop circles. 1.3497 0.04567 163 115 39 9
929 No I don't know why they leave money on the ground either. 1.3497 0.04887 163 119 31 13
930 It’s so fun to mess with them when they leave their phones inside. 1.3497 0.04887 163 119 31 13
931 We must first try to win their hearts and minds. 1.3497 0.04398 163 113 43 7
932 Marcia I think your depth perception is still a tad off since you got those trifocals. 1.3497 0.04730 163 117 35 11
933 You were right, Blort. Their money DOES grow on trees. 1.3497 0.04483 163 114 41 8
934 He believes we did this with Trump ballots 1.3497 0.04964 163 120 29 14
935 If we take away their busy work, the society will crumble. 1.3497 0.04964 163 120 29 14
936 One more bag and we'll have enough to cover the rose garden. 1.3497 0.04809 163 118 33 12
937 For some reason this makes them very compliant before we beam them up. 1.3497 0.04567 163 117 36 10
938 He wants us to drop them over the fence. 1.3497 0.04887 163 119 31 13
939 I think he likes us 1.3497 0.04649 163 116 37 10
940 Ignore him. All the humans want out. 1.3497 0.04809 163 118 33 12
941 Then we spread them around again. They seem to love it. 1.3497 0.04567 163 115 39 9
942 The orders were to bring back the most intelligent species we could find. 1.3497 0.04809 163 118 33 12
943 That's not bad for your first time, Glerg. We just have to work on your aim a little. 1.3497 0.04483 163 114 41 8
944 The creature seems strangely unprovoked by our action. 1.3497 0.04649 163 116 37 10
945 After that last human, I'm going vegetarian. 1.3497 0.04887 163 119 31 13
946 Now you're sure the directive is 'Take us to your leafer,' right? 1.3497 0.05260 163 124 21 18
947 How many times do I have to tell you? It's LEADER not LEAFER. 1.3497 0.04483 163 114 41 8
948 He doesn't use a leaf-blower. Let's buy the place next door. 1.3497 0.04730 163 117 35 11
949 You rake em. We take ‘em. 1.3497 0.04730 163 117 35 11
950 Sure, take the leaves...2020 has taken everything else from me... 1.3497 0.04730 163 117 35 11
951 Now to REALLY blow his mind, put them back. 1.3497 0.05260 163 124 21 18
952 Of course they don’t know, look at how they run through fossil fuels 1.3497 0.04567 163 115 39 9
953 ‘You’re being ignorant,’ they said! ‘Illegal Aliens aren’t going to take your job,’ they said!” 1.3481 0.04994 158 116 29 13
954 It’s fun to dump them on the planet next door. 1.3478 0.05005 161 119 28 14
955 Let's dump them all in the neighbors yard and start an earthly feud. 1.3478 0.04515 161 113 40 8
956 Next week is recyclables. 1.3478 0.04515 161 113 40 8
957 Do we put them back on? 1.3478 0.04429 161 112 42 7
958 Trust me. They love tree droppings.. They collect them. 1.3478 0.04847 161 117 32 12
959 Are you sure those are the intelligent ones? 1.3478 0.05082 161 120 26 15
960 Beam up more! You can't eat just one. 1.3478 0.05082 161 120 26 15
961 I'm telling you, these things must be worth a fortune. Everyone's collecting them. 1.3478 0.04847 161 117 32 12
962 I told you it was “leader” not “leafer.” 1.3478 0.04766 161 116 34 11
963 This must be the roomba upgrade! 1.3478 0.04766 161 119 30 12
964 These must be of great value to them. 1.3478 0.04684 161 115 36 10
965 Of course it's valuable, why else would they all be collecting it? 1.3478 0.04684 161 115 36 10
966 Just dump it in the neighbor's yard as usual. 1.3478 0.04601 161 114 38 9
967 Earth exploration just isn't the same since the abduction ban. 1.3478 0.04684 161 115 36 10
968 These must be valuable. So many aliens are stockpiling them. 1.3478 0.04601 161 114 38 9
969 OK. Now we have to find the recipe for the dressing. 1.3478 0.04927 161 118 30 13
970 Given the time the earthlings spend collecting them, they must have incredible value. 1.3478 0.04684 161 118 33 10
971 Walt Whitman was referring to this? 1.3478 0.04429 161 121 30 10
972 No sign of intelligent life anywhere, but let's examine these just in case 1.3478 0.04927 161 118 30 13
973 It’s set to detect the most intelligent carbon based life forms 1.3478 0.04847 161 117 32 12
974 Based on all the effort the human uses to collect them, they must have great value. 1.3478 0.04515 161 113 40 8
975 I thought pickup was on Tuesdays? 1.3478 0.05005 161 119 28 14
976 Hurry! Before the wife sees us, and don't forget to get into the corners this time. 1.3478 0.04766 161 116 34 11
977 Of course, they're valuable! They rake them into large piles! 1.3478 0.04766 161 116 34 11
978 Once we refuel, we can erase his mind and get out of here. 1.3478 0.04515 161 113 40 8
979 2020 just keeps getting stranger and stranger. 1.3478 0.04847 161 117 32 12
980 See, THIS is what I meant by "mission creep." 1.3478 0.04766 161 116 34 11
981 I told you there were 200. We don't need a recount. 1.3478 0.05232 161 122 22 17
982 Worth the trip every year, just to see their faces! 1.3478 0.04601 161 114 38 9
983 ...and then we jump in them. 1.3478 0.04684 161 115 36 10
984 I hope next time we get picked to invade instead. 1.3478 0.04766 161 116 34 11
985 Unidentified fall object. 1.3478 0.04847 161 117 32 12
986 For every ten probings, one good deed. 1.3478 0.04766 161 116 34 11
987 they must be good for something he seems to be collecting them 1.3478 0.04515 161 113 40 8
988 They obsessively stockpile them. Of course they’re valuable. 1.3478 0.04601 161 114 38 9
989 If this doesn’t make him happy, nothing will. 1.3478 0.04847 161 117 32 12
990 That's the VACUUM button Bob! 1.3478 0.04684 161 115 36 10
991 Does he know that we provide snow removal 1.3478 0.04429 161 112 42 7
992 I still don’t this this makes up for all of those kids we abducted. 1.3478 0.04766 161 116 34 11
993 Do you ever feel like our ship's just a glorified lawn bag? 1.3478 0.04847 161 117 32 12
994 Anything to make the leaf blower noise stop! 1.3478 0.05005 161 119 28 14
995 I bet he wishes he had one of these. 1.3478 0.04766 161 116 34 11
996 These must be a precious resource, they spend so much time harvesting them. 1.3478 0.04684 161 115 36 10
997 Well, I guess it beats the anal probe 1.3478 0.05082 161 120 26 15
998 Nice going, John. You missed. 1.3478 0.04766 161 116 34 11
999 This offering suffices 1.3478 0.04847 161 117 32 12
1000 Luckily Trump can’t close the border to all aliens 1.3471 0.05715 121 89 22 10
1001 Jack could not accept the apparent evidence that leaf removal was the alien's ultimate objective 1.3464 0.05021 153 112 29 12
1002 Next, I'll show you how the Tractor Beam 3000 mulches. 1.3459 0.04886 159 118 28 13
1003 Leaf him alone, Scotty 1.3459 0.04967 159 117 29 13
1004 This must be their currency. I heard him say they were raking it in. 1.3459 0.04635 159 113 37 9
1005 I liked it better when we did anal probes. 1.3459 0.04886 159 116 31 12
1006 You weren’t kidding Urkh, down here it does grow on trees. 1.3459 0.04886 159 116 31 12
1007 It costs extra because it's 'Earth Weed.' Trust me, rich Martian kids always fall for it every time. 1.3446 0.04955 148 107 31 10
1008 It's menial work, but when you're undocumented, jobs are hard to come by. 1.3446 0.04955 148 107 31 10
1009 Once we mastered a quiet leaf sucker, Earthlings begged us to take over. 1.3445 0.05653 119 87 23 9
1010 Keep taking his ammunition so he can't use his weapon! 1.3442 0.04732 154 110 35 9
1011 I know you're just a trainee but the target should have been quite obvious. 1.3442 0.04732 154 114 29 11
1012 Take me to your leafer. 1.3439 0.05089 157 117 26 14
1013 I need more fiber in my diet. 1.3439 0.04757 157 113 34 10
1014 These beings must be the important ones. See how they congregate in piles? 1.3439 0.04926 157 115 30 12
1015 Wow,on this planet money really does grow on trees. We’ll be heros when we get back. 1.3439 0.04842 157 114 32 11
1016 They must be valuable or he wouldn’t be collecting them. 1.3439 0.04400 157 109 42 6
1017 We really need to adjust the aim on this beam 1.3439 0.04842 157 114 32 11
1018 I heard him cough, let's just grab the leaves and go. 1.3439 0.04842 157 114 32 11
1019 They’re organically grown, non-GMO, and gluten free. 1.3439 0.04926 157 115 30 12
1020 Carbon-based sunlight converter crisps are in season. 1.3439 0.04926 157 115 30 12
1021 Community service sucks. 1.3439 0.05089 157 117 26 14
1022 They really don't like Aliens doing the landscaping work around here. 1.3439 0.04926 157 115 30 12
1023 You’re sure these are his young? 1.3439 0.04926 157 115 30 12
1024 OK, but after this we’re done looking for intelligent life here. 1.3439 0.05008 157 116 28 13
1025 Finally! An earthling who remembers leaf collection is Thursday. 1.3439 0.04757 157 113 34 10
1026 I'm telling you, I get the feeling we're working for them. 1.3439 0.04582 157 111 38 8
1027 Every earth cycle, humans gather them and absorb their energy by stepping on the crunchy ones. 1.3439 0.04757 157 113 34 10
1028 Then we put them in his neighbors yard and they will kill each other off. 1.3439 0.05089 157 117 26 14
1029 When you're done here, maybe you can do the back too." 1.3439 0.04582 157 111 38 8
1030 The earthling stifles his anger now, but later we shall steal his snow! 1.3439 0.04842 157 114 32 11
1031 The leaves are okay for kindling but don’t forget to beam up the hominid. Those babies burn for hours! 1.3439 0.04842 157 114 32 11
1032 I hope they taste better than the dog 1.3439 0.04926 157 115 30 12
1033 Jobs for everyone" he said 1.3425 0.05274 146 109 24 13
1034 I've got high octane in the side yard. 1.3423 0.05794 111 81 22 8
1035 It must be something precious. Why else would he be collecting them? 1.3421 0.04583 152 107 38 7
1036 My new leaf service is out of this world! 1.3421 0.04860 152 110 32 10
1037 You have to bag it first. 1.3421 0.04860 152 110 32 10
1038 Clearly they must be delicious, Trog! They are so intent in harvesting them. 1.3421 0.04769 152 109 34 9
1039 Why is it that they always look so bewildered? 1.3419 0.04795 155 112 33 10
1040 Strange,he seems happy were stealing his food to feed our planet. 1.3419 0.04707 155 111 35 9
1041 Damn aliens. Stealin’ all our jobs. 1.3419 0.04795 155 112 33 10
1042 Don’t eat them all now. Save some for the trip home 1.3419 0.04795 155 112 33 10
1043 Needless to say, Jimmy failed on the abduction section of UFO driving test 1.3419 0.05132 155 116 25 14
1044 he already saw us. what were we supposed to do, just leave? 1.3419 0.05584 117 85 24 8
1045 Honey, I ended up going with that other leaf removal company, remember the one? Their price was outta this world, but they’re good! 1.3400 0.05079 150 111 27 12
1046 We place them in his neighbor's yard then analyze their conflict. 1.3399 0.04559 153 108 38 7
1047 Do you get that eerie feeling our intimidation tactics aren't having the desired effect? 1.3399 0.04559 153 108 38 7
1048 He saw us! Put them back! 1.3399 0.04743 153 110 34 9
1049 Good job son...just a little to the left next time 1.3399 0.04652 153 109 36 8
1050 That’s the last time we let your brother-in-law adjust the tractor beam. 1.3394 0.06144 109 82 17 10
1051 This species still bags them. 1.3380 0.04568 142 99 38 5
1052 No, those aren't THE Toronto Maple Leafs! 1.3380 0.05182 142 105 26 11
1053 Could you come back this summer for the weeds? 1.3380 0.05182 142 105 26 11
1054 They always look so disappointed. 1.3380 0.05182 142 105 26 11
1055 What a fool! He just lets us take as many as we want and doesn't even care!!! 1.3380 0.04986 142 103 30 9
1056 illegal aliens are stealing our jobs! 1.3380 0.05278 142 106 24 12
1057 They have a funky taste but they're gluten free. 1.3378 0.04751 148 106 34 8
1058 They gather leaves, we gather leaves. 1.3378 0.05123 148 110 26 12
1059 ...and now we short the rake market! 1.3378 0.04653 148 105 36 7
1060 No - abductions are next week. 1.3378 0.04847 148 107 32 9
1061 Zog! They must be precious, the creature is mining and hoarding them! 1.3378 0.05033 148 109 28 11
1062 Yes, I'm sure this is the intelligent life form. 1.3378 0.04941 148 108 30 10
1063 No, you can't jump in them. 1.3378 0.04751 148 106 34 8
1064 Accept his offering - on this planet, money grows on trees. 1.3378 0.05033 148 109 28 11
1065 They've had such a horrible 2020 that I thought it would be nice to help out. 1.3378 0.05123 148 110 26 12
1066 I don’t know, Glork. Maybe the unexamined leaf is worth leaving. 1.3378 0.05033 148 109 28 11
1067 Where were you thirty minutes ago? 1.3378 0.04941 148 108 30 10
1068 I told you we were too late to see the fall colors… Now put them back. 1.3378 0.05033 148 109 28 11
1069 We can't take him. Our orders are to capture intelligent life! 1.3378 0.05033 148 109 28 11
1070 That’ll be $20. 1.3378 0.04503 148 106 35 7
1071 The leaves must be valuable. They spend so much time gathering them. 1.3377 0.04688 151 108 35 8
1072 QAnon is gonna go bananas over this little caper. 1.3357 0.05230 140 104 25 11
1073 Migrant workers are so helpful 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1074 No death rays? No giant robots? Just do all their yard work and they let us take over? Sweet. 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1075 Jackpot! We’re rich! 1.3356 0.05259 146 110 23 13
1076 They must be important. Why else would he gather them? 1.3356 0.04887 146 106 31 9
1077 And then we drop them over the fence. His neighbors will never believe him. 1.3356 0.04789 146 105 33 8
1078 The bill for our services will be astronomical! 1.3356 0.05259 146 110 23 13
1079 We’re his kind of Alien. 1.3356 0.04982 146 107 29 10
1080 They'll never advance their civilization if we do everything for them. 1.3356 0.04789 146 105 33 8
1081 Dont worry, they still believe these things come from trees. 1.3356 0.04789 146 105 33 8
1082 Well that was closer. Remember son, ‘clutch then beam’. 1.3356 0.04789 146 105 33 8
1083 Idiot human, it’s like he doesn’t know money grows on trees 1.3356 0.05169 146 109 25 12
1084 No no, I said it’s time to LEAVE. 1.3356 0.05348 146 111 21 14
1085 I know you’re hungry, Zolt. We’ll get him in a minute — first I want these little things to give it some crunch. 1.3356 0.05004 149 110 28 11
1086 Think long-term, humans can't resist jumping into these. 1.3333 0.04459 147 103 39 5
1087 Hope he doesn't have a dog like the last guy. 1.3333 0.05717 120 90 20 10
1088 Sure. Every two weeks til winter would be great. Do you do plowing too? 1.3333 0.04928 144 105 30 9
1089 He doesn't seem to mind when we take his food 1.3333 0.04828 144 104 32 8
1090 How many times do I need to explain this, Larry? First we earn his trust, then we do the anal probe. 1.3333 0.04999 141 103 29 9
1091 Well they must be valuable - everyone's collecting them. 1.3333 0.04726 144 103 34 7
1092 Are you sure you want to stick with "Four Seasons Landscaping"? 1.3333 0.05215 144 108 24 12
1093 He is going to be mad, he worked hard to make that pile! 1.3310 0.04699 145 104 34 7
1094 Close only counts in tentacle clamps and fusion darts. 1.3310 0.04764 142 102 33 7
1095 How will their civilization advance if you keep doing this for them? 1.3310 0.05166 142 106 25 11
1096 Are you sure we are doing this right? 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1097 Next we find where he keeps the bags. 1.3310 0.05069 142 105 27 10
1098 It's nice of these Earthlings to gather our needed spaceship biofuel in such tidy piles. 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1099 Editor: "Just act casual; he won''t suspect a thing." 1.3310 0.05069 142 105 27 10
1100 Hey, a few more jobs like this one and we'll have enough to get home! 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1101 Bend to our will puny earthlings. 1.3310 0.05069 142 105 27 10
1102 That’s not what I meant when I said it was time to leave. 1.3310 0.04550 142 100 37 5
1103 So much time and effort. They must be REALLY valuable. 1.3310 0.04658 142 101 35 6
1104 You gotta try these. They're great with salsa. 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1105 Rake me up Scotty 1.3310 0.05449 142 109 19 14
1106 Why is the earthling discarding these? Their quite tasty. 1.3310 0.04969 142 104 29 9
1107 I've always believed in starting with the highest forms of life on a planet. 1.3310 0.04550 142 105 30 7
1108 Reminds me of farm-to-table back home. 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1109 He shot the same look at us with the snow last winter. 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1110 This takes care of our holiday shopping! 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1111 It seems to value them. 1.3310 0.05069 142 105 27 10
1112 No one will believe him when he says we cleaned up his leaves for nothing.. 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1113 Now watch him lose his mind when I spread them around the front yard! 1.3310 0.05069 142 105 27 10
1114 I understand they taste just like kvrxyq. 1.3310 0.05069 142 105 27 10
1115 Apparently that creature is a gatherer, not a hunter. 1.3310 0.05069 142 105 27 10
1116 Thank you for choosing Centauri System Lawn Service, please Holocall to book your next appointment. 1.3310 0.05166 142 106 25 11
1117 Honestly, you couldn't hit the broad side of a Borg cube! 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1118 Pass the dip 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1119 Hey, it's an extra two hundred dollars a week, and I get to set my own hours. 1.3310 0.05166 142 106 25 11
1120 This is why they think we built the pyramids. 1.3310 0.04764 142 102 33 7
1121 What if the order meant "leave," not "leaves?" 1.3310 0.04764 142 102 33 7
1122 I heard one say, “money grows on those. 1.3310 0.05166 142 106 25 11
1123 Leafing on a jet plane 1.3310 0.05262 142 107 23 12
1124 If they only knew what this stuff can do. 1.3310 0.04969 142 104 29 9
1125 we have found signs of intelligent life on earth 1.3310 0.04969 142 104 29 9
1126 They’ll fire us if we don’t bring back some form of intelligent life from this planet. 1.3310 0.04969 142 104 29 9
1127 Its 2020 they need all the help they can get! 1.3310 0.04868 142 103 31 8
1128 What? They said to bring back organic material 1.3310 0.04764 142 102 33 7
1129 He is a Trumper. Let's leave him on the Earth! 1.3308 0.04975 133 96 30 7
1130 Just beam it into the neighbor’s yard. 1.3288 0.04359 146 102 40 4
1131 I remember this guy from last Fall. Just quickly scoop up the specimens and let him up last. He rides his rake up the beam. I believe his name is ‘No Friggen Way’. I just call him Friggen. 1.3287 0.05230 143 108 23 12
1132 Wait, did he Venmo you? 1.3286 0.04909 140 102 30 8
1133 A little more to the left. 1.3286 0.04909 140 102 30 8
1134 Quit screwing around and pick him up already. 1.3286 0.05114 140 104 26 10
1135 It will be great! They make big piles and jump on them...I saw it on YouTube! 1.3286 0.05114 140 104 26 10
1136 They’re delicious toasted, and he’ll make a tasty dip. 1.3286 0.05407 140 107 20 13
1137 Yes, I'm sure. They hate it when aliens take their jobs. 1.3286 0.05114 140 104 26 10
1138 I say we blow them out on the other side of the fence and start a war.” 1.3286 0.05012 140 103 28 9
1139 Well ok, then. Why don't we move on to parallel parking? 1.3286 0.05114 140 104 26 10
1140 They must be important. He keeps gathering them up. 1.3286 0.04803 140 101 32 7
1141 We used to focus on cows but the boss is trying to go vegan. 1.3286 0.04803 140 101 32 7
1142 Don't worry, nobody will believe him 1.3286 0.05213 140 105 24 11
1143 Thanks,neighbor! There’s a few piles in the front yard, too! 1.3276 0.05581 116 86 22 8
1144 This won't take long. I just need specimens for my research on post-industrial rituals as relics of agricultural harvesting practices among primitive earth societies. 1.3276 0.05844 116 88 18 10
1145 These idiots could use a break. 1.3271 0.05905 107 80 19 8
1146 And once we finish the gutters, then he’ll take us to their leader? 1.3262 0.04879 141 103 30 8
1147 Confirmed; no intelligent life. But we can still beam up lunch. 1.3262 0.04774 141 102 32 7
1148 Are we really doing this for research, or are we just having fun? 1.3262 0.04879 141 103 30 8
1149 It's so nice how they conveniently pile them up for us. 1.3262 0.05083 141 105 26 10
1150 And they just think they're still coming from the trees, even when the branches are empty. I love Fall!" 1.3262 0.05083 141 105 26 10
1151 I know we don't actually NEED the beam to do this but I like to give them a show. 1.3262 0.04557 141 100 36 5
1152 It grows on trees, must be useful. 1.3262 0.05278 141 107 22 12
1153 I can't believe these humans would just throw away these magic, color-changing papers! 1.3262 0.04879 141 103 30 8
1154 give me that ... you couldn’t hit the ocean from the beach 1.3238 0.06419 105 82 12 11
1155 Almost, but one more mistake like this and you'll fail your test. 1.3237 0.04920 139 102 29 8
1156 It could be the taller object, but the red hat doesn’t inspire much confidence that it’s a higher life form. 1.3237 0.05228 139 105 23 11
1157 They'll never believe his UFO sighting story. 1.3237 0.05127 139 104 25 10
1158 Our leaders are going to be soooo impressed with our collection of intelligent life from this planet. 1.3237 0.04920 139 102 29 8
1159 We'll make a bundle off these now that oak leaf smoking has been legalized on Centurion 84. 1.3237 0.04920 139 102 29 8
1160 The humans keep amassing these in piles. We must study its contents. It must be of great importance. 1.3237 0.05228 139 105 23 11
1161 This is the most intelligent life we've found. 1.3237 0.04920 139 102 29 8
1162 I collect seashells and beach glass, too. 1.3235 0.05206 136 102 24 10
1163 Jerk the beam a little bit forward and watch his reaction. Always good for a laugh. 1.3233 0.04838 133 96 31 6
1164 Like golf, it seems to be a frustrating pastime they enjoy. 1.3233 0.04955 133 97 29 7
1165 I know it's a drag, but volunteering in the Third World looks really good on college applications. 1.3233 0.04719 133 95 33 5
1166 What’s even funnier is him explaining this to his wife when we spread these around again later. 1.3233 0.04838 133 96 31 6
1167 Who taught you how to aim that thing? 1.3226 0.04797 124 88 32 4
1168 He's not taking the bait. Use porn instead? 1.3226 0.05788 124 96 16 12
1169 The parents aren't even trying to stop us 1.3226 0.05191 124 91 26 7
1170 Your hypnotic power is amazing! He's just standing there while he watches us take his precious chlorophyll-generator! 1.3212 0.04962 137 101 28 8
1171 I think this is what Earthlings mean by “leave taking.” 1.3212 0.04962 137 101 28 8
1172 Just act normal... 1.3212 0.04626 137 98 34 5
1173 You drunk idiot, you're gonna clog the tractor beam! 1.3209 0.05360 134 102 21 11
1174 Please tell me you didn't leave the garbage bag on Neptune. 1.3196 0.05961 97 72 19 6
1175 So all this “superintelligence” and the best we can do is $20 per yard? 1.3185 0.05004 135 100 27 8
1176 You have a wrench up there? I got leaky faucet in my bathroom. 1.3182 0.05193 132 99 24 9
1177 Roger Base, we are now collecting life forms from Earth for analysis 1.3182 0.04966 132 97 28 7
1178 The ad said total landscaping. What did he think we’d be doing? 1.3182 0.04848 132 96 30 6
1179 We will bill you for the leaf cleanup later. 1.3168 0.06123 101 77 16 8
1180 I KNEW there was an app for that! 1.3158 0.04934 133 98 28 7
1181 After this we‘ll go apple picking 1.3158 0.05048 133 99 26 8
1182 Hopefully this makes up for eating his wife last week. 1.3158 0.04817 133 97 30 6
1183 A little to the right. 1.3158 0.04817 133 97 30 6
1184 Finally... intelligent lifeforms. 1.3158 0.05048 133 99 26 8
1185 This human piles them up nicely and doesn’t scatter them all around with those noisy blowy things. Let’s not kill him. 1.3158 0.05269 133 101 22 10
1186 Remember before COVID when we got paid to abduct them? 1.3158 0.05160 133 100 24 9
1187 I think I should tell them that this is not marijauna 1.3158 0.05269 133 101 22 10
1188 Blowing our cover better be worth this new diet of yours. 1.3158 0.04318 133 93 38 2
1189 Now, if a human sees us we do something to make their story sound truly insane. 1.3158 0.04697 133 96 32 5
1190 They make great compost. The human, not so much. 1.3158 0.04934 133 98 28 7
1191 more ballots for trump stolen by UFO's! 1.3158 0.04817 133 97 30 6
1192 I think maybe "Take me to your leafer" was a typo. 1.3158 0.04934 133 98 28 7
1193 That should make a nice salad, any ideas for the main course? 1.3158 0.04817 133 97 30 6
1194 He said we could use his yard to land on if we cleared out all his leaves. 1.3158 0.04934 133 98 28 7
1195 This is a long way to go for mulch. 1.3158 0.05481 133 103 18 12
1196 I’m just saying ‘take me to your leafer’ COULD have been a typo. 1.3158 0.05376 133 102 20 11
1197 A few more loads into the neighbor's yard and they'll destroy themselves. 1.3158 0.05048 133 99 26 8
1198 I know this violates the prime directive, but this stuff makes the best mulch. 1.3158 0.04934 133 98 28 7
1199 Say Brahm, do they realise we eat these to reduce pollution on our planet. 1.3158 0.05160 133 100 24 9
1200 No one will be-‘leaf’ him. Ha ha. Get it! 1.3158 0.05048 133 99 26 8
1201 I mean they were free so of course I took them 1.3158 0.05048 133 99 26 8
1202 If you can do that, why the hell have I been using this stupid rake?? 1.3158 0.04817 133 97 30 6
1203 He’ll really flip when he gets the bill. 1.3154 0.05126 130 97 25 8
1204 Oh look, a man with a rake. Give him some leaves, he'll love that. 1.3154 0.05009 130 96 27 7
1205 Listen, I told you a hundred times, you have to adjust for windage. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
1206 You need to work on your aim, 1.3131 0.05495 99 72 23 4
1207 The neighbours will never believe me. 1.3130 0.05207 131 99 23 9
1208 So glad we found this planet: the fuel supply seems endless! 1.3130 0.05207 131 99 23 9
1209 They must be important or they wouldn't save them all. 1.3130 0.04734 131 95 31 5
1210 They always expect to be 'probed'; this will really confuse them. 1.3130 0.05318 131 100 21 10
1211 Leaf him alone; he is the fall guy. 1.3130 0.05093 131 100 22 9
1212 We'll be rich! 1.3130 0.04976 131 97 27 7
1213 Whatever these are, they must be important -- the Earthling spend so much time collecting them. 1.3130 0.04608 131 94 33 4
1214 You're just enabling him. 1.3130 0.05318 131 100 21 10
1215 Don't show him our visa. Let him think we're undocumented and see what he does. 1.3130 0.04857 131 96 29 6
1216 When boss said "only the dry wrinkly ones" did he mean the leaves or the people? 1.3130 0.05318 131 100 21 10
1217 I told you, it grows on trees here. 1.3130 0.04857 131 96 29 6
1218 Wanna watch him rake again? 1.3130 0.05318 131 100 21 10
1219 How much to do our rugs ? 1.3130 0.04976 131 97 27 7
1220 No, Morg, three feet to the right. 1.3130 0.05428 131 101 19 11
1221 Judging by the effort that this terrestrial put in them, these things must be worth a fortune! 1.3130 0.04857 131 96 29 6
1222 Abducts leaves, and probes. 1.3130 0.05428 131 101 19 11
1223 Are you sure they are the dominant species? 1.3130 0.05207 131 99 23 9
1224 Now do you see why I wanted those leaf bags at Costco? 1.3130 0.05207 131 99 23 9
1225 Guys,just be sure to put those in a paper lawn & leaf bag and place it curbside. 1.3130 0.04976 131 97 27 7
1226 I told him we'd help with his chores after the last time we probed him 1.3130 0.04857 131 96 29 6
1227 This planet: Try to help a guy and he gives you the side eye. 1.3130 0.04734 131 95 31 5
1228 The lawn-and-leaf-vacuum-ray bag appears to be full. 1.3130 0.04976 131 97 27 7
1229 "Thank you very mulch! We leaf you now in peace. 1.3130 0.04857 131 96 29 6
1230 It's good to keep busy between abductions. 1.3130 0.04857 131 96 29 6
1231 We're gonna be rich, dude. 1.3130 0.04976 131 97 27 7
1232 Every year, piles of these “leaves” absorb countless human children. They will make us unstoppable. 1.3130 0.05318 131 100 21 10
1233 Bob tries out the new Roboleafer with mixed feelings. 1.3130 0.04672 131 99 25 7
1234 The best part is seeing his face when we spit them out again. 1.3130 0.05318 131 100 21 10
1235 Ha! No one is going to believe him. 1.3130 0.05207 131 99 23 9
1236 They came looking for intelligent life. 1.3130 0.05428 131 101 19 11
1237 Phil .. I know you love fall but we can't just do inter-dimensonal space-time travel for the leaves . 1.3130 0.04976 131 97 27 7
1238 You know you’re just going to drop them all over the yard, so stop teasing him and get on with the abduction! 1.3125 0.04929 128 94 28 6
1239 It's no wonder their planet's in trouble. They can't even grasp leafcycling. 1.3115 0.05470 122 93 20 9
1240 Seriously, Frank ? We crossed the whole galaxy just for this? 1.3109 0.05167 119 88 25 6
1241 He did such a thorough job of collecting them -- they must be really valuable. 1.3101 0.05138 129 97 24 8
1242 Damn autocorrect. We typed 'leader'. 1.3101 0.04897 129 95 28 6
1243 I still feel that the groomer is the intelligent form. 1.3101 0.05255 129 98 22 9
1244 No Martin, I said WE'RE leaving. 1.3101 0.05255 129 98 22 9
1245 Is this the last thing on our scavenger hunt? 1.3101 0.04643 129 93 32 4
1246 Do they not realize how rare this stuff is? 1.3101 0.04511 129 94 31 4
1247 Those better not just sit in the garage gathering stardust. 1.3101 0.05138 129 97 24 8
1248 Take all you want 1.3101 0.05369 129 99 20 10
1249 How many days of community service do you have left? I really need to be home by next week. 1.3101 0.05138 129 99 21 9
1250 The memo didn't say probe his ash. 1.3101 0.05255 129 98 22 9
1251 Forget the leaves. Go for the MAGA hat 1.3101 0.04897 129 100 21 8
1252 The earthling's giant fork appears to be an inadequate tool. 1.3101 0.04772 129 94 30 5
1253 If this bunch of abductees is anything like that last group they are probably going to refuse to talk. 1.3101 0.04897 129 95 28 6
1254 It makes earthlings immoderately happy. Who knows why? 1.3101 0.04772 129 94 30 5
1255 Where were you when I was a kid? 1.3101 0.05138 129 97 24 8
1256 A little farther to the left. 1.3101 0.04897 129 95 28 6
1257 If they keep that up, we’re going to have to rename ‘fall’... 1.3101 0.05481 129 100 18 11
1258 They still haven't realized that compost is their most valuable resource...and that gold is not biodegradable. 1.3101 0.05369 129 99 20 10
1259 Grab them all - it's not like they grow on trees. 1.3101 0.05255 129 98 22 9
1260 Now let's dump them in his neighbor's yard and run. 1.3101 0.05019 129 96 26 7
1261 Elmax! That's it! As soon as we get home, you're seeing the eye doctor! Now move over! I'm driving! 1.3101 0.05138 129 97 24 8
1262 Now we take them to our weeder. 1.3101 0.05369 129 99 20 10
1263 I want a recount. 1.3101 0.05019 129 96 26 7
1264 Oh so doing chores isn’t an alien concept to you? 1.3101 0.05481 129 100 18 11
1265 Look, they just stand there when we take their stuff. 1.3101 0.04897 129 95 28 6
1266 I’m just now realizing “landscape maintenance” isn’t a euphemism for crop circles. 1.3101 0.05138 129 97 24 8
1267 This lawn company takes “social distancing” very seriously. 1.3101 0.05019 129 96 26 7
1268 Nothing shocks them anymore this year. 1.3101 0.05369 129 99 20 10
1269 Don't worry, we'll put them back when we're done probing them. 1.3101 0.04835 129 99 22 8
1270 A look back on a normal day in 2020 1.3101 0.05255 129 98 22 9
1271 Coming over here, taking our jobs... 1.3101 0.04897 129 95 28 6
1272 Humans turn over new leaves, we beam them up. 1.3101 0.04835 129 99 22 8
1273 My wife’s inside 1.3095 0.05341 126 96 21 9
1274 Scotty, I think it might be time for that eye exam! 1.3093 0.06448 97 76 12 9
1275 We need to be charging more. 1.3093 0.05744 97 72 20 5
1276 These must be Earth's smartest organisms: they show ability to change with the times. 1.3093 0.05554 97 71 22 4
1277 Try New England. 1.3089 0.05431 123 94 20 9
1278 Pranking Harry Reid isn't quite as thrilling as it used to be... 1.3089 0.05787 123 97 14 12
1279 Oh, Zorg, you're such a rake! 1.3089 0.05552 123 95 18 10
1280 I’m dying for a pine cone. 1.3089 0.04916 123 90 28 5
1281 Take me to your weeder ??????? 1.3089 0.05180 123 92 24 7
1282 Hey, this is my customer! 1.3089 0.05431 123 94 20 9
1283 How ‘bout you try your other right? 1.3089 0.05180 123 92 24 7
1284 Two thousand years of school between us and we get assigned to leaf removal? 1.3089 0.05049 123 91 26 6
1285 They must be of value, or he wouldn't be collecting them. 1.3089 0.05180 123 92 24 7
1286 ...And what EXACTLY do you plan to DO with those? 1.3089 0.05671 123 96 16 11
1287 I think the name ‘Four Seasons Landscaping’ would attract our kind of clientele. 1.3089 0.05431 123 94 20 9
1288 Can you do the same to our Executive Branch 1.3089 0.05049 123 91 26 6
1289 Be careful this time Blorp, last time there was a kid in one of these piles. 1.3089 0.05307 123 93 22 8
1290 I always like things to be in order before invading 1.3089 0.05307 123 93 22 8
1291 !@#* aliens, taking all our jobs! 1.3089 0.05787 123 97 14 12
1292 You missed again, Zebulon. For Godorz sake, put your glasses on! 1.3084 0.05698 107 81 19 7
1293 One planet's foliage is another planet's fossil fuels. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
1294 Look, we can abduct earthlings any time of the year but this is the prime season for composting. 1.3071 0.04259 127 97 27 3
1295 We have to do these menial jobs until we get a green card 1.3071 0.05421 127 98 19 10
1296 Just a little to your right 1.3071 0.04810 127 93 29 5
1297 From my observation leaves are more intelligent. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1298 Now drop them in the neighbor's yard to start a fight. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1299 They're nice and crunchy but could use a little garlic salt. 1.3071 0.05421 127 98 19 10
1300 He’s carefully collecting them. They must be important. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1301 They have to be their most valuable property -- they spend more time gathering them than doing anything else. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1302 Whatever it is....I can't afford it! 1.3071 0.05756 127 101 13 13
1303 So what’ll I tell my wife I’m doing out here? 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1304 They must have value or they wouldn't collect them. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1305 And quieter than a leaf blower. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1306 We're supposed to grab their leader, not their leafer. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1307 Are you sure Imperial Master’s exact words were ‘Eats, Shoots, & Leaves’? 1.3071 0.05535 127 99 17 11
1308 I hear we're not the only aliens cleaning leaves 1.3071 0.05421 127 98 19 10
1309 They must be valuable. Humans hoard them. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1310 You were right. There's no intelligent leaf on this planet. 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1311 I don't know where they got all that "We come in peace," nonsense. We come for leaves. 1.3071 0.05304 127 97 21 9
1312 Now let's go put them back on Dave's lawn. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1313 Let me guess. You're squeamish about probing this guy. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1314 Just dump them all on the other side of the fence and let's see what happens. 1.3071 0.04810 127 93 29 5
1315 Yes, I said, "Take me to your leafer." 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1316 Our mission is to collect only intelligent life forms. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1317 How much do you think we should charge him? 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1318 Probe him for his thoughts on mulch versus compost. 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1319 Good! Level Two suction works fine. Now watch his face when I switch to Hypersuck. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1320 First the leaves, then the trees and then the people. 1.3071 0.05304 127 97 21 9
1321 We’ve experimented on half his family. It’s the least we can do. 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1322 I mean, if we're going to probe him, it's the least we can do. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1323 Are you sure that this is where we pick up our take-out food? 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1324 Lovin’ the new hired help, and this time they’re not illegal 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1325 They must be valuable or the creatures wouldn't collect them. 1.3071 0.04938 127 96 24 7
1326 Let's take all of them. He obviously thinks they're valuable. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1327 He thinks we're a Roomba! 1.3071 0.05304 127 97 21 9
1328 The list says he's next but let's go find one with boobs. 1.3071 0.05421 127 98 19 10
1329 So much better than the mulch we get at home! 1.3071 0.04810 127 93 29 5
1330 I said to beam up Leif. 1.3071 0.05304 127 97 21 9
1331 Are you sure you understand “raking it in.” 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1332 Leaves, again?!? Leaves?!? How many times have we gone over this? It's 'take me to your leader!' Leader! 1.3071 0.05304 127 97 21 9
1333 When he's asleep, we'll tape them back onto the tree. 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1334 I spoke with their leader. He wanted us to help him achieve lawn order in his land. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1335 Would you mind getting the gutters too? 1.3071 0.05421 127 98 19 10
1336 I can’t believe you let him talk us into this. 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1337 Uh, we're supposed to find their LEADER. With a d. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1338 I think it's time for glasses. 1.3071 0.05535 127 99 17 11
1339 I said aim at the alien LIFE form, not LEAF form! 1.3071 0.05421 127 98 19 10
1340 That's beyond beleaf. 1.3071 0.05421 127 98 19 10
1341 Meatless Monday again, Zorg? 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1342 No! The order said 'ship leaves now.' 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1343 ...catch - and release! 1.3071 0.05304 127 97 21 9
1344 So, when did you decide to become a vegan? 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1345 Your aim was a little off. Try again. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1346 But watch his face when I switch it to 'blow.' 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1347 Well, if they weren't valuable, he wouldn't be collecting them. 1.3071 0.04810 127 93 29 5
1348 We used to abduct people, Murray. Now look at us! 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1349 Can I come too? 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1350 Okay, now forward a bit more. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1351 He’ll barely notice. It’s 2020. 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1352 Four Seasons Landscaping really is out of this world. 1.3071 0.05647 127 100 15 12
1353 Well, there must be a good reason why he's collecting them 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1354 It’s the least we could do. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
1355 Don’t look at me like that- I’m harvesting the money that grows on trees of course. 1.3071 0.05063 127 97 22 8
1356 In return for this favor, we demand an explanation of the musical fantasy film ‘Cats’ 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1357 No way this fits into the city’s budget 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1358 So that's eco-fueled. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1359 It was then that Randy knew he hadn't wasted all those nights with Art Bell. 1.3071 0.05535 127 99 17 11
1360 Let's put these in his neighbor's yard. I'm sure they'll be unimpressed with his explanation. 1.3071 0.05304 127 97 21 9
1361 I thought you didn’t pick up on Thanksgiving. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1362 This new Rumba is super effective 1.3071 0.05421 127 98 19 10
1363 I feel like when they’re not frightened we’re doing something wrong. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
1364 We come in Leafs now Rake me to your Weeder 1.3071 0.05421 127 98 19 10
1365 They’ve had a year...it’s the least we can do. 1.3071 0.05185 127 96 23 8
1366 These are what all the great ones sang about...Sinatra, Piaf and Nat King Cole. 1.3065 0.05393 124 95 20 9
1367 Whatever they are, they must be valuable--everyone is stockpiling them. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1368 We clear cut our planet and now we need mulch. 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
1369 Twenty dollars per lawn, 100 lawns a day ... we're gonna pay for this trip in no time. 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
1370 I always like a salad before the main course. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1371 Really? This is how we want to reveal ourselves? 1.3058 0.05095 121 90 25 6
1372 The media can’t get enough of Alien Invaders Total Landscaping. 1.3058 0.05485 121 93 19 9
1373 They must be valuable. Why would they spend so much time gathering them? 1.3058 0.04817 121 88 29 4
1374 Ah ... the fruits of his harvest are ours! 1.3058 0.04958 121 89 27 5
1375 It’s the least we can do after all that probing 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1376 How much ransom will he pay? 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
1377 The aliens are coming for our jobs. 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
1378 Every fall they put these offerings out for us. Personally I prefer the cows but we don’t want to appear rude. 1.3058 0.04817 121 88 29 4
1379 Patience kid, you just can’t start off on the death ray. 1.3058 0.05485 121 93 19 9
1380 Same time next week? 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1381 The Fall of Man. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1382 Bob was pleased with the new lawn service. 1.3058 0.04817 121 88 29 4
1383 This human is falling apart. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1384 We’ve offered them money, but they just want to get rid of them. 1.3058 0.04817 121 88 29 4
1385 Your salad will be ready in flash, Blxgrug. 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
1386 Its your first day so I’m going to pretend you didn’t just say “Rake me to your leader” 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1387 Food source raked into piles. You don't get that on any other planet. That's why I love coming here. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1388 They want us to collect intelligent leaf forms? 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1389 OK, that's it. You missed again. I'm driving. 1.3058 0.05095 121 90 25 6
1390 Damn that Google translate : It should have been “Take me to your leader” .....not leafer ..... 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
1391 No one will believe him, they'll just say it's RAKE news! 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1392 Excellent source of fibre. 1.3058 0.04958 121 89 27 5
1393 Or we could just blow them out into the street. 1.3058 0.05095 121 90 25 6
1394 I realized the universe offers two great pleasures: travel and making mulch. 1.3058 0.04958 121 89 27 5
1395 These must be valuable, they’ve been collecting them all season 1.3058 0.04958 121 89 27 5
1396 I can't wait to see the expression on his face when we blow this stuff all over his lawn. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1397 Can you guys wait so I can call my mother-in-law to come out here? 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
1398 After we process it, we sell it to them as mulch for a big profit. 1.3058 0.04817 121 88 29 4
1399 Double or nothing says he's another rake thrower. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1400 Literally the only things on this planet worth taking. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1401 You couldn't leaf it alone, could you? 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1402 I love Fall. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1403 We don’t need samples. Clearly, still in the hunter - gatherer stage. 1.3058 0.05095 121 90 25 6
1404 They burn them. Pearls before swine. 1.3058 0.03587 121 95 21 5
1405 First the Roombas, now this... I give up. 1.3058 0.05095 121 90 25 6
1406 Should have stayed with the local landscape company. 1.3058 0.05095 121 93 21 7
1407 I’m not sure that’s what he meant by, “Please, leave. 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
1408 It's happening. The Martians are here to take away our jobs 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1409 ...what else says “We come in peace”? 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
1410 'Don't worry, we'll put them back in the trees by spring!' 1.3058 0.05095 121 90 25 6
1411 « Organic Material Market Goes Galactic: How Interplanetary Waste Management Saves Us Money & Helps Create Life On Other Planets » 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1412 If you feel so guilty about probing him, the least we can do is erase his memories of 2020. He is just going to have to rake again in 20 minutes. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1413 Good compost is just so hard to find. 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
1414 Apparently they are fun to collect and jump in 1.3058 0.04958 121 89 27 5
1415 We'll be taking this sample of intelligent life with us 1.3058 0.04671 121 92 23 6
1416 Sorry, we were just leaving 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1417 Can you believe they burn dinosaurs to run their vehicles 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1418 I know, I know. I took too much this time... but they’re organic! 1.3058 0.04522 121 86 33 2
1419 Illegal aliens stealing jobs from ordinary Americans... just trying to fit in here 1.3058 0.05609 121 94 17 10
1420 Finally, we can confirm there is leaf on earth. 1.3058 0.05609 121 94 17 10
1421 My new yard service is out of this world! 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
1422 Just wait, he’ll start running and screaming in a second. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
1423 Let's make his day. Put it in reverse 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
1424 We come in peace, but we do need your toilet paper. 1.3049 0.06181 82 61 17 4
1425 Tell me again what the plan is here? 1.3043 0.05934 92 69 18 5
1426 We are leaving. 1.3034 0.05851 89 68 16 5
1427 So if this isn’t intelligent life we’ll come back for that other thing 1.3034 0.06472 89 69 13 7
1428 It's roughage, Karen! You can't live on freeze-dried ice cream. 1.3034 0.06472 89 69 13 7
1429 This is a great side gig! 1.3034 0.06272 89 68 15 6
1430 I miss the old Kanye. 1.3034 0.06272 89 68 15 6
1431 That guy looks like he could use a pick-me-up. 1.3033 0.04640 122 88 31 3
1432 Definitely looks like an important collectible 1.3033 0.05320 122 93 21 8
1433 Sure, the new alien overlords were different but they had a great public works policy. 1.3033 0.05191 122 92 23 7
1434 For this one let's put them all in his gutter 1.3025 0.05141 119 89 24 6
1435 Finally, a sign of intelligent life - no leaf blower. 1.3025 0.05668 119 93 16 10
1436 I just couldn‘t watch him use that primitive tool any long. 1.3025 0.05000 119 88 26 5
1437 Now we just need cigarette paper. 1.3025 0.05411 119 91 20 8
1438 We figured you guys needed a little help right now 1.3025 0.05000 119 88 26 5
1439 Are you sure that "rake me to your leader" is the right translation? 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
1440 We know they're valuable because earthlings gather them. 1.3000 0.05795 90 67 19 4
1441 Sure they burn them but I don’t think these are the leaves they smoke 1.3000 0.04822 120 93 21 6
1442 Where were these guys before I started raking? 1.3000 0.05575 90 66 21 3
1443 I don't want to be a backseat driver but would you please properly align our abduction beam. 1.2991 0.05188 117 88 23 6
1444 Foolish Earthlings. They don't realize money does grow on trees. 1.2991 0.05044 117 87 25 5
1445 - Why do we keep dumping leaves in that guys garden? - Because nothing can last and no victory is final, Jim. If you read Camus you would understand. 1.2991 0.05188 117 88 23 6
1446 I am unfazed. It's 2020. 1.2991 0.05044 117 87 25 5
1447 Earth to Zorg: What's the rush? We're getting paid by the hour, not by the leaf! 1.2991 0.05328 117 89 21 7
1448 It's amazing! It's like they're just giving them away! 1.2991 0.04743 117 85 29 3
1449 When we're done here, let's go dump them in the gutter. 1.2991 0.05598 117 91 17 9
1450 Now we put them in Steve's yard, that idiot thinks the wind blows them there 1.2991 0.05328 117 89 21 7
1451 And I thought To Serve Man was a cookbook! 1.2991 0.05465 117 90 19 8
1452 I can't believe how easy it is to steal the precious metals of this planet. 1.2991 0.05328 117 89 21 7
1453 Alien ship visits, and 'leaves' no trace. 1.2991 0.05044 117 87 25 5
1454 Sigh, you never listen. I said to pick up Steve, not the leaves. 1.2991 0.05465 117 90 19 8
1455 I'll definitely recommend this lawn service. 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
1456 I’m gonna make earrings with these and sell them on Etsy! 1.2975 0.05068 121 91 24 6
1457 Man. I can never catch a rake! 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
1458 And that, my son, is what they call soft diplomacy. 1.2967 0.05524 91 67 21 3
1459 He does not seem to be too concerned... 1.2966 0.05150 118 89 23 6
1460 Your aim is off. 1.2966 0.05289 118 90 21 7
1461 Although ‘leaves,’ they can be taken. Oxymoronic planet. 1.2957 0.05657 115 90 16 9
1462 You could use the roughage, Phil. 1.2957 0.05089 115 86 24 5
1463 He gets his lawn cleared, we occasionally get a cat. 1.2957 0.05236 115 87 22 6
1464 he's wondering if we can come back later when his wife is home" 1.2957 0.05236 115 87 22 6
1465 Are you sure they told us to find signs of intelligent leaf? 1.2957 0.05380 115 88 20 7
1466 No,no,no! "To Serve Mankind" is a recipe book, not a policy manual! 1.2957 0.05520 115 89 18 8
1467 We really learned our lesson after that encounter with an earthling's septic tank. 1.2957 0.05520 115 89 18 8
1468 The transporter, you idiot. Not the dust buster. 1.2957 0.05089 115 86 24 5
1469 We don't want him. He can't even keep up with these things. 1.2957 0.05089 115 86 24 5
1470 Set course for his gutters. 1.2957 0.05657 115 90 16 9
1471 Interstellar volunteer opportunities 1.2957 0.05380 115 88 20 7
1472 Can you take my kids too? 1.2957 0.05380 115 88 20 7
1473 ....because crop circles are SO last year 1.2957 0.04617 115 91 19 5
1474 Our research suggests it's a funerary ritual practiced annually by the carbon life forms. We're saving them from cremation. 1.2951 0.04683 122 92 25 5
1475 Just wait’ll I point this thing at his cock. 1.2946 0.05762 112 88 15 9
1476 It's like taking candy from a baby. 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
1477 It's the human we want, Gary 1.2941 0.05113 119 90 23 6
1478 You’ve got the intelligent ones. The other one is using a rake. 1.2927 0.06132 82 62 16 4
1479 Sweet Jesus Frank, look a the size of HIS probe! 1.2927 0.05484 82 62 17 3
1480 And then put them back, just to see the look on his face. 1.2920 0.04817 113 83 27 3
1481 When I told you to leave, this is not what I meant. 1.2920 0.05433 113 87 19 7
1482 Next time let me do the talking Mr. 'Take me to your leafer.' 1.2920 0.05577 113 88 17 8
1483 Be sure to come back next year 1.2920 0.04817 113 83 27 3
1484 Let's give him a batch from his neighbor's yard too!" 1.2920 0.05433 113 87 19 7
1485 Next is the living room rug. 1.2920 0.05577 113 90 14 9
1486 They don't even put up a fight. 1.2920 0.04817 113 83 27 3
1487 if humans spend months collecting them, then they must be valuable. 1.2920 0.05134 113 85 23 5
1488 Does it eat, shoots and leaves, or does it eat shoots and leaves? 1.2920 0.05433 113 89 16 8
1489 You spent a thousand blerms on the leaf collector option, but you won't pay for a heated passenger seat? You are such a gorkhole. 1.2920 0.05433 113 87 19 7
1490 It was nice of him to put them in a pile for us. 1.2920 0.04978 113 84 25 4
1491 Thanks Scotty. See you again next fall 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
1492 This isn't what the boss meant when he said, "go get what they are collecting." 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
1493 You know, with cream cheese and lox these wouldn't be bad 1.2920 0.05987 113 91 11 11
1494 My understanding is eventually we'll earn enough money for a bike. 1.2920 0.05134 113 85 23 5
1495 No,the boss said only the intelligent life. 1.2920 0.05717 113 89 15 9
1496 There goes next year's compost. 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
1497 He thinks the city paid way too much for this leaf collector. 1.2920 0.05577 113 88 17 8
1498 Fred, you diabolical genius! He works all day and we sweep in to claim the prize. 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
1499 The one with the hat is the human. 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
1500 I like this planet where they rake food into piles for us 1.2920 0.05433 113 87 19 7
1501 When did you last have your eyesight checked? 1.2920 0.05433 113 87 19 7
1502 Random act of kindness... 1.2920 0.05717 113 89 15 9
1503 Can I interest you in a cat? 1.2920 0.05577 113 88 17 8
1504 First we take all their food! 1.2920 0.05577 113 88 17 8
1505 Back in my day, we abduct cows. 1.2920 0.04978 113 84 25 4
1506 Very nice. Next, parallel parking. 1.2920 0.05134 113 85 23 5
1507 This trip was all about your compost bin all along, wasn't it?! 1.2920 0.05433 113 87 19 7
1508 I’d say our new Roomba has been even better than advertised. 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
1509 History will see us as liberators! 1.2920 0.05577 113 88 17 8
1510 I wonder if they know how to plow a driveway ? Paul Brass Ipswich, Mass 1.2920 0.05853 113 90 13 10
1511 Foreign aid. 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
1512 After covid nothing will surprise them. 1.2920 0.05577 113 88 17 8
1513 I still think the order was to "take leave". 1.2920 0.04978 113 84 25 4
1514 I had one job. 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
1515 Take the leaves. Leave the cannoli." 1.2920 0.05433 113 87 19 7
1516 I need them for my diorama 1.2920 0.04817 113 83 27 3
1517 Welp, I guess they finally found a good use for Space Force 1.2920 0.05433 113 87 19 7
1518 I said "let's take their leader", not "let's take their leaves" 1.2920 0.05134 113 85 23 5
1519 The ad did say alien workers 1.2920 0.05433 113 87 19 7
1520 Let' spread them around the front yard! 1.2917 0.05076 120 91 23 6
1521 For some reason, the Martian children love to play in these! 1.2895 0.05246 114 87 21 6
1522 I don’t quite understand the broadcast “don’t leave home without it,” so we better take them. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1523 You’re doing it wrong. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1524 After this we'll go for the small brown nuggets in the other yard. 1.2883 0.05779 111 88 14 9
1525 We are the latest Roomba model. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1526 You mean they never put up any resistance? 1.2883 0.04855 111 82 26 3
1527 They say money grows on trees here! 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1528 How will you get these through customs? 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1529 He'd never believe it's compost powered. 1.2883 0.05919 111 89 12 10
1530 This is to reward you for not using one of those noisy leaf blowers that we can hear all the way in our planet 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1531 Watch how he explains this to the neighbors. 1.2883 0.04855 111 84 23 4
1532 Stanley, your hoarding has got to stop. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1533 He doesn't look as happy as I expected... 1.2883 0.05020 111 83 24 4
1534 See. They expect aliens to do their yard work for them. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1535 Stop! That's not a Caesar. 1.2883 0.05779 111 88 14 9
1536 For an extra $5 will you drop them in my neighbor's yard? 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1537 Earthlings never get our absurd sense of humor. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1538 I hope this convinces them we've come to be helpful." 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1539 We can charge them for this, right?" 1.2883 0.05020 111 83 24 4
1540 Ralph stop it. Leaf it be. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1541 Experiment #5: I plan to blow them back in his neighbor's yard to see what happens. 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1542 I know you think this is cheeky, but the 'undocumented alien stealing his job' joke is lost on him. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1543 Don’t tell me the contract covers the whole neighborhood! 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1544 We fly at the speed of light and can only get a landscaping job? 1.2883 0.05020 111 83 24 4
1545 We tried the humans already. Even mouthwash couldn't get rid of the taste... 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1546 I can hear his friends laughing at him now, “so the UFO used a retractor beam to suck up the leaf pile.” 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1547 Zubat, you've blown our cover! Leaf pickup is on Tuesdays! 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1548 Quick—before he can use his weapon against us! 1.2883 0.05020 111 83 24 4
1549 Not bad, except he saw you. Now we have to kill him. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1550 Clearly these are valuable. Why else would earthlings collect them? 1.2883 0.04855 111 82 26 3
1551 I said LEAVE, not LEAF!! 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1552 Thanks, but I’m still not interested in an extended warranty on my vehicle. 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1553 I mean, they did ask us to bring back samples of intelligent life, right? 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1554 They must be valuable... he collected them so carefully 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1555 Just wait until he sees the invoice! 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1556 I like to use them for those potpourri bags I make. Why are you always so critical of my hobbies 1.2883 0.04855 111 82 26 3
1557 It's good to start with some greens before the main course. 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1558 It took 4 years of college to become an intergalactic landscaper? 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1559 Who is this Martha Stewart you feel you must emulate? 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1560 27 light years....27 light years! For mulch!? 1.2883 0.05779 111 88 14 9
1561 Sorry, missing a human is an automatic fail on the saucer license test. 1.2883 0.05020 111 83 24 4
1562 I don't think that's going to scare them into submission. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1563 Traveling with a neat freak is such a pain. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1564 It's Leader. With a D. Not an F. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1565 This is nothing compared to how we mess with the Christmas lights. 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1566 Why does he look surprised, it's leaf collection day. 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1567 Your other right. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1568 I thought it was the least we could do to thank him for not using a damned gas-powered leaf blower. 1.2883 0.05779 111 88 14 9
1569 I know all about non-interference, but one small favor can't hurt. 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1570 I knew illegal aliens would be coming for my job sooner or later. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1571 They must be of immense value, as we have observed this gathering across this entire planet. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1572 Your aim sucks. Hand over the controller. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1573 Hey!.....Don't forget the gutters fellas. 1.2883 0.05020 111 83 24 4
1574 And then we beam them back, into a mysterious clump under the porch. 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1575 What? It's for the organic garden. I'm telling you, they won't even notice they're gone. 1.2883 0.04855 111 82 26 3
1576 They're coming here and stealing our jobs. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1577 They collect them everywhere. They must be worth something. 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1578 Four Seasons Total Landscaping's operations budget has really improved since the last President's endorsement. 1.2883 0.05635 111 89 13 9
1579 Nobody’s gonna be-leaf this. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1580 I said earthling. Try again 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1581 Why are you looking at me like that? I can’t seem to find toilet paper anywhere. 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1582 Essential workers are never in the spotlight. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1583 They're valuable. The earthling is collecting them. 1.2883 0.05020 111 83 24 4
1584 Yes, money does grow on trees. 1.2883 0.05779 111 88 14 9
1585 ... Just keep going, they'll never believe him. 1.2883 0.04855 111 82 26 3
1586 Parallel planet navigation is good, Zelda. Next week's class, we'll focus on alien abduction. 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1587 Now put them in that neighboring planet's yard. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1588 Susan said that if you mix them with moon water, they take ten years off your face! 1.2883 0.05779 111 88 14 9
1589 I was going to jump in those. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1590 They’ve had it rough this year, let’s help with the small stuff 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1591 Remember, the mission brief asked for Earth LIVES. 1.2883 0.03235 111 91 15 5
1592 It's been a tough year for us all. Let us releaf you. 1.2883 0.05779 111 88 14 9
1593 If we help them clean up their backyard, maybe they’ll stop trying to move into ours 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1594 All intelligent life forms extracted. We can leave now. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1595 : "It's OK, I messed up my first abduction, too." 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1596 Honey, I think you can cancel this month’s lawn service. 1.2883 0.04855 111 82 26 3
1597 When they said aliens were taking our jobs, this is not how I imagined it 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1598 This seems normal for 2020 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1599 leave my leaves and leave 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1600 I know it's a lot of work, but it will be worth it if it means we never have to hear a leaf blower again. 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1601 Leave, Carl. I said we needed to *leave.* 1.2883 0.05779 111 88 14 9
1602 'I'm sure the boss said marijuana leaves, not just any leaves.' 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1603 They’re calling us the Uber of extraterrestrial landscaping. I’m just happy to pick up some cash for the holidays. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1604 Really, Zorgon? $25 per yard? That barely covers our overhead! 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
1605 Finally we can get some peace from their leafblowers! 1.2881 0.04977 118 89 24 5
1606 Remind me again, how are we superior? 1.2870 0.04753 108 79 27 2
1607 Keep looking! We have until January 20th to find those missing ballots! 1.2870 0.05589 108 84 17 7
1608 They need all the help they can get these days. 1.2857 0.04818 112 83 26 3
1609 With this kind of service, we'll rule the world! 1.2857 0.05533 105 81 18 6
1610 I hope he appreciates that we're not just blowing them into the neighbor's yard. 1.2857 0.04982 112 86 21 5
1611 It will take them another 1,000 years before they have a leaf based energy... so this is win win. 1.2857 0.05141 112 85 22 5
1612 Watch.......The human will not resist while we take all it’s plant hands. 1.2857 0.05295 112 86 20 6
1613 No! The other nuisance. 1.2857 0.05761 84 63 18 3
1614 So, same time next year? 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1615 It’s leader not leafer? Take me to you LEADER! What are you from QAnon? 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1616 Are you sure he doesn’t compost? 1.2844 0.04893 109 81 25 3
1617 Now you’re just showing off. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1618 It must be valuable. He has been gathering it whole morning... 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1619 We're going to have to get you some glasses 1.2844 0.04893 109 84 21 4
1620 It's the least we can do. He's had a hard year. 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1621 Tastes like Chicken. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1622 Immigrants get the job done. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1623 Leave the earthling with the weapon. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1624 We want to understand once and for all why it's so satisfying to jump in piles of these things. 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1625 Now, I know what you're thinking - "I can't take a UFO out for a test ride without the dealer trying to sell me a silly add on like a leaf blower." But let me show you the crop circles that you can whip up with this bad boy! 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1626 Next time I expect you to tell me about your school project more than one light year in advance! 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1627 It’s the least we can do after how that 2020 experiment turned out. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1628 The new leaf-pickup service is out of this world. 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1629 It would be nice if he would give us a little smile of appreciation." 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1630 come my lovely and gentle darlings, come to a place where there is no raking. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1631 ...And then we'll put them back tomorrow. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1632 Once they change colors the obsession begins, first it's the constant pictures then the gathering... We must discover their secret 1.2844 0.04716 109 80 27 2
1633 Are this Bitcoins? 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1634 Congratulations, you have just failed your human abduction test 1.2824 0.05944 85 65 16 4
1635 This is the least we can do for the earthling after giving him the anal probe. 1.2824 0.06175 85 66 14 5
1636 Finally, some real food. 1.2824 0.06175 85 66 14 5
1637 You missed again Rupert" 1.2824 0.05703 85 64 18 3
1638 These must be very valuable--beam them up. 1.2821 0.05741 78 58 18 2
1639 To serve man. 1.2818 0.04855 110 82 25 3
1640 Nobody's going to believe him. 1.2818 0.05649 110 87 15 8
1641 Now scatter them all over the yard again. 1.2818 0.05187 110 84 21 5
1642 Great — now put 'em over there. 1.2818 0.05024 110 83 23 4
1643 You really should wear your glasses when you drive. 1.2818 0.05024 110 83 23 4
1644 Is this some sort of offering? 1.2818 0.04680 110 81 27 2
1645 A good first try, but you need work on aiming the beam. 1.2818 0.04855 110 82 25 3
1646 This sequel could be titled Close Encounter of the Absurd Kind. 1.2818 0.05500 110 86 17 7
1647 They're all over social media, so they must be valuable. 1.2818 0.05187 110 84 21 5
1648 They seem important. 1.2818 0.05187 110 84 21 5
1649 They're being collected everywhere so they must be of some significance in this culture; that's why. 1.2818 0.05187 110 84 21 5
1650 That's Scottie. You know what to do. 1.2816 0.05239 103 78 21 4
1651 Next you dump them onto the neighbor's lawn and watch the earthlings freak! 1.2816 0.05239 103 78 21 4
1652 Just because they gather them does not mean they are food! 1.2816 0.05758 103 81 15 7
1653 How will we know which one is the Queen? 1.2805 0.06322 82 64 13 5
1654 No, not him. We’re looking for intelligent life forms. 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1655 It's the least we can do since he shovels our landing ramp in winter. 1.2804 0.04932 107 82 21 4
1656 When we get these back to Zyrblyx, we'll be rich! 1.2804 0.04932 107 80 24 3
1657 You missed again Daryl 1.2804 0.05442 107 83 18 6
1658 Make sure they’re the crunchy ones, Marv 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1659 Apparently it's polite for guests to offer their help with the chores. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1660 We'll have the largest compost pile in the galaxy. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1661 Now he's going to expect this every year. 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
1662 I’m not looking forward to the gutters. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1663 I thought we could spruce up the place before obliterating it.. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1664 This is the most intelligent lifeform I can find. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1665 Hmm! Must be the new Elon Musk lawn service 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1666 It’s strange that he never seems to mind. 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
1667 I figure, first let's do him a favor, then we ask. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1668 We're rich! 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1669 He seems to value these small brown objects -- let's beam them all up! 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
1670 Where did they think they came from? 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1671 I’ve got a bunch of empty soda cans if you want them. 1.2788 0.05870 104 83 13 8
1672 This biofuel thing seems too easy. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1673 I must say, your aim with the tractor beam is consistently awful, Louis. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1674 The longer we keep him raking...the less chance he can vote 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1675 Captain, I feel certain that the prime directive does not include helping this guy with his leaves. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1676 Are you sure this is the correct translation for ‘raking-it-in’? 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1677 First you have to appear to befriend them. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1678 Lets pick him up too, just for kicks. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1679 They must be amazing, look how aggressively they collect them! 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1680 They’re ‘leaves,’ Gorgon. It’s a perfect exchange. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1681 No, I don't think it counts as abduction. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1682 They must be important--humans are obsessed with them. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1683 They must be valuable. He collected them. 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1684 The new leaf blowers are out of this world 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1685 Hon come check out this Roomba 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1686 We're fine, nobody is going to believe he finished his to-do list. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1687 Are you sure this is where potpourri comes from? 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1688 This way he won't talk. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1689 That's a snack. I want lunch. 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1690 These specimens are likely to be of higher intelligence than that tall one holding the stick. 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1691 Did that guy think we said, "take us to your leafer?" 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1692 They have value. Look how he carefully collects them. 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
1693 Do you guys take Venmo? 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1694 Do you shovel snow, too? 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
1695 So much for waiting for a windless day. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1696 You know...it’s the least we can do. 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1697 Word around the galaxy is they're really fun to step on. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1698 He's not scared or running away. We'll domesticate them all in no time. 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1699 No! Dinner first, toppings second. 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1700 It's just a test. Wait'l we try this at the Federal Reserve 1.2788 0.04823 104 77 25 2
1701 I can't believe they spend hours doing this 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
1702 Mmmm Maple! 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1703 You better be leaf it. 1.2788 0.05870 104 83 13 8
1704 Just be careful not to collect the useless husk standing next to the pile of precious Earth treasure. 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1705 We're supposed to bring back sentient creatures, and I guess these brightly colored ones are what we need. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1706 Outsourcing lawn care has gotten out of this world. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1707 You never get a second chance to make a good first impression. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1708 I think the one with the hat is the human. 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
1709 Don’t forget the gutters. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1710 I hope you're planning to compost and not just dumping on another planet. 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
1711 Must be valuable...he's putting them in a pile and bagging them. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1712 We have enough of those, honey. Move the beam a little to the right, and put it on high. 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1713 Hey! I was going to compost that! 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1714 Let’s focus. Last week we almost beamed up his dog” 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1715 We have to work on your aim. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1716 The lawn comb appears related to its mating ritual. 1.2788 0.04823 104 77 25 2
1717 Easiest $50 we ever made. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1718 I hate the ones who use a leaf blower. 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1719 Now the fun part, we go spread them all over his front yard. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1720 Cool, Dyson! Let's test it on pet hairs. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1721 I am so over this vegan diet. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1722 Two more piles and we win the leaf blower. 1.2788 0.03974 104 83 19 2
1723 I don't know what they are either but he's collecting them for some reason. 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1724 His furry master urinated on these earlier, they may be very precious. 1.2788 0.06027 104 84 11 9
1725 Any chance you guys like snow? 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1726 I still can't tell whether he minds. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1727 Jerry forgot to ask the new gardeners if they had a green card. 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1728 We come in peace and to free you from your leaf blowers. 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1729 I cant stand all these tourists who come for the leaves. Go back to Florida! 1.2788 0.05870 104 83 13 8
1730 I love these "his friends will never believe it" tours. 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1731 I wonder if I can get them to do this every year. 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1732 Leaf no trace. 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1733 They must be valuable, or it wouldn't be hoarding them. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1734 No, I said LEADER. 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1735 After all, neatness defines civilization. 1.2788 0.05709 104 82 15 7
1736 Year 2061: “I miss simpler times.” 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1737 My human swears this is how you compost 1.2788 0.04823 104 77 25 2
1738 Your aim is as bad as our cover! 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1739 Leaf it to us. Get it? Greg? Get it? 1.2788 0.05870 104 83 13 8
1740 - please don’t leaf me here, I’ll come too 1.2788 0.05870 104 83 13 8
1741 Must be valuable, the way they fuss over them 1.2788 0.04725 104 79 22 3
1742 Ah yes crunchy earth snack! 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1743 Natural selection 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1744 Aliens. We get the job done 1.2788 0.05543 104 81 17 6
1745 You clearly need more practice!! 1.2788 0.05372 104 80 19 5
1746 See? We come in peace. 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
1747 Jim found a solution to the neighbors' complaints about his leaf blower 1.2778 0.05067 108 84 19 5
1748 What are you doing? We have leaves at home. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1749 I love the smell of beamed up leaves. 1.2778 0.04893 108 81 24 3
1750 This will teach them to stop stealing soil samples from our astroid. 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
1751 Then we spray 'em all over the yard right before his wife gets home. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1752 Works for you - Works for me. 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
1753 I hope they made them extra crispy this time... 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
1754 Bob, you have always had a weird sense of humor. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1755 No one will believe him when we take his snowman, either. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1756 It's the least we can do 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1757 Beaming up leaf litter was a problem easily solved. Getting the stuff to decompose on Mars has proven to be challenging. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1758 This sure beats RAKING the forest. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1759 They got enough going on this year. 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
1760 These will look great in my extra-terrarium. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1761 Just tell him it's a 72 million mile flight back and ours isn't flushing properly. 1.2778 0.05859 108 87 12 9
1762 I thought they just came from trees! 1.2778 0.04893 108 81 24 3
1763 He seems to be hoarding them, it must be his food supply. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1764 I haven’t been getting enough fiber. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1765 I wonder what he ate to produce these droppings. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1766 That's dog DNA. 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
1767 The leaf lords have arrived. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1768 Whoops, no child in this pile! 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
1769 Are you sure the Primary Directive is " Leaves - No Trace'? 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1770 What did I tell you? Does he look like he appreciates your help? 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
1771 Remember Mom said: Only organic and no pesticides. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1772 The keepers say it calms them down to pile these up into little ceremonial mounds 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
1773 Leaves, Beldar? Three billion miles for some crummy leaves!? 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1774 We probe all week, on weekends I just want to clear brush. 1.2778 0.04893 108 81 24 3
1775 We are stealing his harvest, so he will now attack with his weapon. 1.2778 0.04893 108 81 24 3
1776 In exchange, let’s give them another Kardashian. 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
1777 And who said aliens would never work for humans one day 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1778 It's 2020. Nothing is an alien concept 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1779 Did you forget to turn the cloaking device on again? 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1780 His sense of purpose is now gone. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1781 Lets focus on species that will actually survive" 1.2778 0.04893 108 81 24 3
1782 What do you mean more will fall tomorrow? We just finished! 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1783 Yeah, great. Thanks 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1784 We leave them, they rake them... it's always been this way 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1785 the new neighbors are alright. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1786 Think this will get us on History Channel after midnight? 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1787 I told you this new pneumatic system would be fun! 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1788 That’s the smartest thing we can get from this planet 1.2772 0.05650 101 79 16 6
1789 Look! these life forms are more intelligent that the ones we got at the Trump rally 1.2762 0.05413 105 86 11 8
1790 Okay Fred, but this is the last time! 1.2762 0.05327 105 81 19 5
1791 Strange,this one won’t step into the beam - maybe there’s hope for them after all. 1.2745 0.05424 102 79 18 5
1792 How do you plan to jump in them in zero gravity? 1.2745 0.05242 102 78 20 4
1793 when you said your lawn-service was out of this world, I had no idea... 1.2745 0.05242 102 78 20 4
1794 This Planet is already polluted. Good place to flush it out. Call it fertilizer. 1.2745 0.05242 102 78 20 4
1795 I call the red ones. 1.2745 0.05242 102 78 20 4
1796 Was watching me make the pile really necessary? 1.2745 0.05242 102 78 20 4
1797 They collect them. Why, I do not know. 1.2745 0.04858 102 76 24 2
1798 I don't think he's paying us enough to put these in his neighbor's yard. 1.2745 0.05601 102 80 16 6
1799 Hey, you said aim for the higher life form. 1.2745 0.05424 102 79 18 5
1800 This should be enough feul to get us home. 1.2745 0.05424 102 79 18 5
1801 Are you guys sure you work for the Township? 1.2745 0.05242 102 78 20 4
1802 Last stop. That should be enough bio-fuel to get us home. 1.2745 0.04858 102 76 24 2
1803 Always pick a spotlessly raked yard to dump the leaves. We have to keep these yokels busy. 1.2745 0.05424 102 79 18 5
1804 I'm beginning to think he is just using us to finish his chores. 1.2745 0.05054 102 77 22 3
1805 We know how much raking leaves gives you human’s meaning and purpose so we brought a charitable donation. 1.2745 0.05242 102 78 20 4
1806 I said ‘human,’ not ‘vacuum.’ 1.2745 0.04216 102 85 13 4
1807 Thanks for not being as loud as my neighbor’s leaf blower during work hours. 1.2745 0.05937 102 82 12 8
1808 No, I said beam up Jeeves. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1809 After this we should get pumpkin spice lattes 1.2736 0.05283 106 84 16 6
1810 I promise. They are delicious with ketchup. 1.2727 0.06572 77 61 11 5
1811 I have no idea what you are doing with these, but can you come back in four weeks when the sycamore finally sheds? 1.2718 0.05012 103 78 22 3
1812 Wait ‘til I show him the high beam... 1.2703 0.06174 74 57 14 3
1813 How are we ever going to collect human specimens if you can't even aim the tractor beam straight?" 1.2703 0.07016 74 60 8 6
1814 Trigonometry was never your strong point. 1.2703 0.06467 74 58 12 4
1815 Darn it Jerry, you missed again. 1.2703 0.06467 74 58 12 4
1816 A little to the left Steve 1.2703 0.06174 74 57 14 3
1817 We've saved them! He was going for his matches. 1.2700 0.05096 100 76 21 3
1818 It appears our efforts are not mulch appreciated. 1.2700 0.05660 100 79 15 6
1819 He's not allowed to burn them. The landfill won't take them. So he called us. 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1820 Lol, remember rakes? 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1821 Thats one more human who won’t resist when we return for the invasion. 1.2700 0.05096 100 76 21 3
1822 those illegal aliens are stealing our jobs again 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1823 I said, “Take me to your Leader, not Leafer!” 1.2700 0.05835 100 80 13 7
1824 You missed him. 1.2700 0.05096 100 76 21 3
1825 This should settle the unidentified foliage question for good 1.2700 0.05835 100 80 13 7
1826 A little farther. 1.2700 0.05096 100 76 21 3
1827 Ok that’s the salad organised, so what’s for main course? 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1828 So, it IS rocket science? 1.2700 0.05835 100 80 13 7
1829 No, not him, Zaggowort. Gloog said intelligent life forms only. 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1830 And what about the tree ? 1.2700 0.05660 100 79 15 6
1831 On this planet, the rulers are microscopic organisms ... 1.2700 0.05194 100 81 13 6
1832 So, we won the bid for the leaf collection contract after the town council banned leaf blowers...but there's always someone complaining about aliens taking their jobs 1.2700 0.05660 100 79 15 6
1833 They must be important, he seems to be guarding them with that multi-pronged spear. 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1834 These sample will finally help us determined why they collect them is such large quantities. 1.2700 0.05660 100 79 15 6
1835 Okay, he’s paying us $20. That’s $20 closer to our new Di-Lithium Crystal. You got a better idea? 1.2700 0.05835 100 80 13 7
1836 The earthling collects them.They must be valuable. 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1837 Get enough for the Fall school project. 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1838 Because they're the most intelligent life form on this planet, that's why! 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1839 Take us to your compost bin. 1.2700 0.05096 100 76 21 3
1840 The one day I finally raked ! 1.2700 0.06006 100 81 11 8
1841 Are you sure it's set to "Highest Intelligent Life Form?" 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1842 They're perfect with a little sour cream and capers... 1.2700 0.05096 100 76 21 3
1843 I'll have more for you tomorrow. 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1844 Hey, do you guys do floors and windows too? 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1845 I’ll do the first tally, then you do the recount. 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1846 Makes them think we're on their side. 1.2700 0.05096 100 76 21 3
1847 We would also like a side of compost if you have it. 1.2700 0.04894 100 75 23 2
1848 I said, let's leave, not leaves! 1.2700 0.05660 100 79 15 6
1849 Of course they’re valuable — look at how the humans hoard them! 1.2700 0.04894 100 75 23 2
1850 It is the least we can do after all the probing. 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1851 It's a living. 1.2700 0.05835 100 80 13 7
1852 Until we can afford a Roomba, this is the best we can do. 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1853 This is great PR 1.2700 0.05660 100 79 15 6
1854 Mitch, sick of raking year after year, fantasizes about how to get rid of his leaf pile. 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1855 Let's take them home and then figure out what to do with them. 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1856 I thought our mission was to pick up lives! 1.2700 0.05835 100 80 13 7
1857 Yeah, this should freak him out just a little. 1.2700 0.05660 100 81 12 7
1858 You are such a hoarder!" 1.2700 0.04894 100 75 23 2
1859 Before you know it we’ll have enough fuel money to go back home. 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1860 Fred, that'll be $25 in Martian currency. 1.2700 0.06172 100 82 9 9
1861 I forgot you were a vegetarian. 1.2700 0.05096 100 76 21 3
1862 I want to try some fall crafts. 1.2700 0.05835 100 80 13 7
1863 Aww man, just when I was about to jump into the pile. 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1864 If he’s lying about these things being their most precious resource, I’m going to give these guys such a pandemic. 1.2700 0.05660 100 79 15 6
1865 I told you, I'm trying this vegan thing 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1866 They better come back for my wife 1.2700 0.05660 100 79 15 6
1867 Told you I only ever get the weird ones on TaskRabbit 1.2700 0.05096 100 76 21 3
1868 Defending the Supreme Ruler of Earth against countless invading leaf hordes seemed much more exciting on paper. 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1869 I told you not to have that second drink at lunch. 1.2676 0.06640 71 56 11 4
1870 After you beam them up, could you dump them over the fence 1.2673 0.05610 101 80 15 6
1871 He sees us. Leave them. 1.2667 0.05458 105 83 16 6
1872 It doesn't seem interested in the bait. 1.2667 0.06667 75 60 10 5
1873 Remember roombas? 1.2653 0.05901 98 79 12 7
1874 If you want to see a better look on his face start spinning the leaves around his yard. 1.2653 0.05720 98 78 14 6
1875 The tractor beam doesn't do it. You have to use the death ray if you want to get the nice smell. 1.2653 0.05340 98 76 18 4
1876 Careful...he has an anal probe. 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
1877 It's nice that we're helping this guy with his rake, but what exactly are you suggesting that we do with these dried out leaves? When I came to earth, I was expecting to pick up an exceptional human like a Republican who believes in science. 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
1878 Why should I beam him up? We’re vegetarians. 1.2653 0.05720 98 78 14 6
1879 After all that work, you'd think they'd put up more of a fight. 1.2653 0.05340 98 76 18 4
1880 I think we can make a fortune on this if we charge $21.99 and get Mr. Pillow to do the infomercial. 1.2653 0.05720 98 78 14 6
1881 These must valuable given earthlings’ devotion to harvesting them. 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
1882 Is it leafs or leaves? 1.2653 0.05720 98 78 14 6
1883 he's gathering them up. they must be valuable. 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
1884 I'll prepare the salad dressing." 1.2653 0.05901 98 79 12 7
1885 It's too late to save them from the Fall. 1.2653 0.05720 98 78 14 6
1886 I hope this guy doesn’t have a dog. 1.2653 0.05340 98 76 18 4
1887 If we do it for him, we'll have to do it for everybody! 1.2653 0.05901 98 79 12 7
1888 You do know that we have to declare all vegetable matter when we return? 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
1889 Does he pay us or do we pay him? 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
1890 I heard they were hunter/gathers. They must be gathering these for a reason" 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
1891 Can I get your card? 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
1892 If you rake it we will come. 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
1893 Do you smoke it or snort it? 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
1894 they wouldn't call themselves leaves if they wanted to stay put" 1.2653 0.05720 98 78 14 6
1895 I wish you'd just take them off the tree. 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
1896 I know,I know,but it was going to take him forever. 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
1897 We’re going to kill them with kindness. 1.2653 0.04930 98 74 22 2
1898 Mardi this is genius. Soon we’ll eradicate all leaf blowers from the universe! 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
1899 They must be collectors items. 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
1900 I know it seems like an incredible waste of our advanced technology. Unfortunately, jobs like these are the only ones available to aliens. 1.2653 0.05720 98 78 14 6
1901 I can never read his handwriting, but I'm pretty sure it said, 'bring back the leafer of Earth.' 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
1902 He won't be so grateful when you jump in them and they'll all over his lawn again. 1.2653 0.05720 98 78 14 6
1903 This is so ridiculously deciduous. 1.2653 0.04822 98 76 19 3
1904 Skip over this guy. He’s a super spreader. 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
1905 Outsourced labor 1.2653 0.05340 98 76 18 4
1906 You know, us aliens never get the public appreciation for the work we do 1.2653 0.05720 98 78 14 6
1907 Immigrants stealing my job?! 1.2653 0.05901 98 79 12 7
1908 I told you it’s leave nothing behind not leaf nothing behind 1.2653 0.04599 98 75 21 2
1909 He's not even wearing a mask. 1.2653 0.04930 98 74 22 2
1910 Frank, I'm telling you this won't make up for all the other stuff 1.2653 0.05340 98 76 18 4
1911 OK, shoot them across his yard again, and we'll record the subject's reaction. 1.2651 0.05959 83 65 14 4
1912 Look at him. No nod, no wave, no decency. This is why extraterrestrials stopped moving here 1.2651 0.06201 83 66 12 5
1913 Abduction's a fine job, but what I really want to do is dance. 1.2651 0.06433 83 67 10 6
1914 Hard to believe--the most intelligence life form we've come across here. 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
1915 Note how the slow witted biped carefully collects and guards these specimens. We must identify their secret! 1.2651 0.06433 83 67 10 6
1916 Compost collection is on Tuesday this week because Christmas is a federal holiday. 1.2626 0.05094 99 76 20 3
1917 What do you mean "in case they're out of toilet paper?" 1.2626 0.05668 99 79 14 6
1918 Don’t worry. No one down here believes in identified flying objects. 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1919 This should provide us with enough fuel for us to reach Florida. 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1920 This intelligent species seem to have workers who care for them. 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1921 It's a cookbook! 1.2604 0.05969 96 78 11 7
1922 It's so considerate of the humans to put all our fuel source into nice piles. 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1923 Now watch him rake it back up again when I scatter it all over the yard. 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1924 He was aggressively accumulating them so you know they're highly valuable. 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1925 We now have DNA of the most intelligent life forms! 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1926 Just because he collects them doesn't mean they are valuable. 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1927 I'm afraid I'm going to have to fail you, Harry. Maybe this alien abduction stuff isn't for you. 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1928 Is this what they mean by 'taking in the foliage'? 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1929 I love the crunchy ones! 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1930 Betcha they don't have a leaf sucker at Home Depot 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1931 This may be a little rakeless... 1.2604 0.05782 96 77 13 6
1932 Try the leaves, we've already rejected his species in our search for intelligent life. 1.2604 0.05969 96 78 11 7
1933 The whole point of having a fenced in yard is to stop intruders! 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1934 He's so slow collecting those things, it's driving me crazy. 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1935 Like they say, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1936 Remlar, I promise, just one more stop for these crazy-good chips, then it's outer space. 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1937 Do you believe the earthlings throw this away? 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1938 He was leafed behind. 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1939 While we're here...might as well give the Earthling a hand 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1940 Forget Tesla. We'll corner the market on quiet leaf blowers with our next generation technology. 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1941 See, I told you there's a never-ending supply." 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1942 Is this really all we can do to save this wretched planet? 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1943 They're crisp, colorful and definitely an acquired taste. 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1944 He's so helpful. Please, Mom, can we take him with us? 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1945 No intelligent life forms detected. 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1946 I love the sound they make when we step on them 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1947 OK. He’s distracted. Get down there and insert the anal probe. 1.2604 0.05782 96 77 13 6
1948 Better fill the tank, don’t want to get stuck in Roswell. 1.2604 0.05782 96 77 13 6
1949 Little did anyone know that we thought of the whole sweeping the forest idea way before Trump did. 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1950 We take them and then bring them back everyday for a couple months. 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1951 Stop worrying about tidying up, just beam up the human! 1.2604 0.04966 96 73 21 2
1952 Ain't we a couple of little stinkers? 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1953 Oh, no," you insisted when we left. "We have more than enough leaves to get us there and back. 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1954 Unique fall offer 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1955 I said “deploy the rectal probe” not “deploy the leaf beamer” 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1956 Humans grow, collect, and store these things, it must be of high value. 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1957 Trust me, he won’t tell a soul. We’ll return them to his neighbor’s yard. 1.2604 0.06150 96 79 9 8
1958 Finally, illegal aliens have come to take *my* job as well. 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1959 Did you remember to buy more of the large-size Hefty bags? 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1960 Why are we doing this? Leaves don’t have anuses! 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1961 Can you abduct the intelligent life from my driveway as well? 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1962 I don't think this is what he meant by "take leave". 1.2604 0.05782 96 77 13 6
1963 We've counted it twice. You definitely don't have more than your neighbor 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1964 Myrna, you’re taking this vacuuming thing too far again. 1.2581 0.05048 93 71 20 2
1965 Only bigger ships get tractor beams, so we're stuck with a rake beam 1.2581 0.05048 93 71 20 2
1966 Any room in there for my wife? 1.2581 0.05902 93 75 12 6
1967 I am just doing it on weekends to pay for college. 1.2581 0.05275 93 72 18 3
1968 Oh my!! He was right, aliens are taking our jobs away 1.2581 0.05048 93 71 20 2
1969 You’re a genius, Captain. He does all the work, and we take home the treasure. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1970 ... and, now he has agreed to let us have priceless artifacts from something called his "septic tank"! 1.2577 0.06092 97 80 9 8
1971 Ha, ha - then we shoot it into that guys yard and watch the fireworks! 1.2577 0.05135 97 75 19 3
1972 Best idea for drones yet. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1973 You're close, just slightly throttle the ship forward son. 1.2577 0.05913 97 79 11 7
1974 Trig! You are taking this vegan thing a little too serious! What’s the rest of the crew going to eat! 1.2577 0.05728 97 78 13 6
1975 Dang Zog, it's auto corrected to humus again. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1976 We can take all we want. No one will believe him anyway. 1.2577 0.05135 97 75 19 3
1977 Change Management: Outsourcing 1.2577 0.05728 97 78 13 6
1978 There's your payment. Now return my Wife. 1.2577 0.05135 97 75 19 3
1979 You really think this is the best way to show we come in peace? 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1980 I just love them, so crispy! 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1981 I'll take the ones with nuts. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1982 Fine, you drive the Lawnba next time 1.2577 0.05728 97 78 13 6
1983 Where were you 10 minutes ago? 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1984 They don't complain about the probing if we first help with the yard work. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1985 I really believe we got the intelligent life form this time 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1986 Quit playing with the food! 1.2577 0.05728 97 78 13 6
1987 A little oil and vinegar, salt and pepper and they are really quite tasty. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1988 Take us to your Roomba. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1989 I wonder how he knows that we are Vegan. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1990 Bwah ha ha! Crop circles. Cow mutilation. Old hat. Can't wait to see what conspiracy theories come of this! 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1991 You’re such a neat freak 1.2577 0.04811 97 76 18 3
1992 He thinks we’re A.I. lawn service. Fooled another one. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1993 Discovers rakes and leaves 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1994 Forget the leaves. Please take me with you! 1.2577 0.06092 97 80 9 8
1995 We must find out why earthlings collect them. 1.2577 0.04698 97 73 23 1
1996 Hate to see ‘em go, but love to watch ‘em leave. 1.2577 0.04087 97 78 16 3
1997 Toilet paper shortages hit far and wide. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1998 I see it's still 2020 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1999 Now all we need is wax paper and crayons 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
2000 Okay, now you can put a monolith here 1.2577 0.04922 97 74 21 2
2001 Abort mission - I heard him cough. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
2002 See? They do still rake leaves” “..What? I said they don’t be-lieve” “Oh 1.2577 0.05728 97 78 13 6
2003 Many beams make light work. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
2004 I hope you’re not planning on another one of those ridiculous art projects again 1.2577 0.05135 97 75 19 3
2005 Don't make eye contact, just grab them and go... 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
2006 Making one man feel useless at a time 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
2007 Thanks for the help, but I was promised a probe. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
2008 So the joke is we put them back when they’re sleeping? Frank you’re the worst, I love it 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
2009 Missed! When was your last eye test? 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2010 We don't touch those ones because they carry diseases. 1.2568 0.06103 74 58 13 3
2011 Our aim really isn't what it used to be. 1.2568 0.05463 74 58 14 2
2012 He says just put them in his neighbor's yard. 1.2568 0.06399 74 59 11 4
2013 They taste awful. I can't imagine why they harvest these things. 1.2568 0.06399 74 59 11 4
2014 Wouldn't you miss them if you decided to work from home planet? 1.2561 0.05964 82 65 13 4
2015 Because I also abhor vacuuming, that's why. 1.2561 0.05964 82 65 13 4
2016 This customer complains so do a good job. 1.2561 0.05706 82 64 15 3
2017 Honey, when did the gardeners get a drone? " 1.2561 0.05435 82 63 17 2
2018 You really don't understand our mission here. 1.2561 0.05964 82 65 13 4
2019 We ate leaves all the time when we lived in California back in the 60's. 1.2561 0.05151 82 64 16 2
2020 Maybe something intelligent is hiding in this pile. 1.2561 0.06211 82 66 11 5
2021 When you put them all back after he goes don't forget to spread them around. 1.2556 0.05819 90 72 13 5
2022 Mission schmission, I miss the good old days, when we could probe the humans too. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2023 What I said was ... We should LEAVE now! 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2024 They're tasty, have a nice crunch, and only come out once a year 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2025 At this rate, we'll never rake in enough to get home. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2026 Take em to Area 54 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2027 Ah great- the tractor beam is jammed again. This is the last time we do abductions in the fall. 1.2553 0.05002 94 72 20 2
2028 And when I put her in reverse, it turns into a leaf blower! 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2029 Y’all come back next year, ya hear? 1.2553 0.05846 94 76 12 6
2030 Look, Earthling... times are tough in space too. We had to find a side hustle. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2031 You can deep fry these and I believe they're tastier and cheaper than potato chips. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2032 Hey, space ranger, your aim is off again. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2033 ‘Snack mode is a lot less fun since the beam’s gone vegan.’ 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2034 We're gonna need a bigger bag! 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2035 To hell with "intergalactic cooperation" - we sell them the leaf-Roomba technology and go buy a private island. 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2036 We’ll be leaving soon. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2037 This is certainly an improvement over those damn noisy leaf blowers 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2038 These earth children are much cuter than the parents. 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2039 The fun part is the look on his face when we spread them around the yard again. 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2040 Order misunderstood : told to leave the planet ? 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2041 They still don't understand the value of composting. 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2042 What a strange life form! He doesn't look at all upset that we're sucking up the remains of his departed loved ones. 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2043 I tell you they must be valuable. Humans spend hours collecting them and putting them into special containers. The government has a special department that collects the containers. 1.2553 0.05846 94 76 12 6
2044 I love it when we get to demonstrate the vacuum of space. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2045 Let's give this Earthling a rake break and get him back on the couch for more of that football. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2046 I can't wait to spread these all over a clean lawn. 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2047 Start the steal. 1.2553 0.05846 94 76 12 6
2048 We'll have to ask them to take us to their weeder. 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2049 Just think. They threw all this good fuel away. 1.2553 0.04125 94 76 15 3
2050 Best $20 I've ever spent. 1.2553 0.05846 94 76 12 6
2051 Seeing is be-leaving, man! 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2052 Why does everyone just let us steal this stuff? 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2053 Beam 'em up. Let's see what they're collecting. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2054 Almost done raking the leaves, hon! 1.2553 0.04886 94 74 17 3
2055 They're more difficult to probe, but much easier to compost. 1.2553 0.05002 94 72 20 2
2056 Not what I meant by 'leaving earth'. 1.2553 0.04768 94 71 22 1
2057 Calm down, Zoltar. They’re always taking OUR stuff...! 1.2553 0.05846 94 76 12 6
2058 We'll start small. 1.2553 0.05846 94 76 12 6
2059 Pretty sure the boss said "leader," not "leafer." 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2060 Their puny tools are no match for our advanced technology. 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2061 Ask not what the earthlings can do for you,but what you can do for the earthlings. 1.2553 0.05002 94 72 20 2
2062 Should we ask him to move over a bit? 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2063 Our left, not HIS left. What are you, a human? 1.2553 0.05002 94 72 20 2
2064 He still looks unhappy. Beam down some more of our currency. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2065 Mars needs mulch. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2066 Fascinating! The carbon slug hoards and then discards these specimens while seemingly unaware of their exquisite taste! 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2067 After what we put him through last night it’s the least we could do. 1.2553 0.05002 94 72 20 2
2068 I don't know. It must be some sort of offering. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2069 Quick. We must stop him before he hoards all the toilet wipes. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2070 There's always "that guy" who has to check that we've picked up everything. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2071 Zyptor knew the others on the ship were snickering at his poor aim. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2072 It's the least we can do...he's on tonight's probe list 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2073 I take it we are leafing. 1.2553 0.05002 94 72 20 2
2074 I call this a interstellar galactic calculated act of random kindness! 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2075 When I said it was time to "leave" I meant let's go! 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2076 We must find what makes these things so collectible. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2077 I hear what you're saying, but just wait until you jump in these things! 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2078 And here they thought we were the bad guys 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2079 At this moment, Bob realized the aliens were extratreeestrial. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
2080 Gee, everyone has a side hustle these days. 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2081 Gives him something to talk about on zoom. 1.2553 0.05846 94 76 12 6
2082 This is the best of what’s left after 2020. Wait, dead leaves can’t catch COVID-19, right? 1.2553 0.05647 94 77 11 6
2083 Let take these before they are secured in vessels and collected by the larger angry humans in the huge transporters 1.2553 0.05846 94 76 12 6
2084 We'll take these votes for future use. 1.2553 0.05846 94 76 12 6
2085 Screw the leaves, I wanna probe this guy. 1.2553 0.06038 94 77 10 7
2086 We ran out of TP for the probing. 1.2553 0.03527 94 76 16 2
2087 Idiot! You said “take us to your leafer.” 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2088 ‘Yes, let’s salvage the earth... leave the earthling.’ 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2089 Let me guess 🙄 you forgot to put on your contacts this morning!🤪 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
2090 Quick, beam it up! That's the first sign of intelligent life we've found. 1.2553 0.05647 94 75 14 5
2091 He looks pissed, I hope that rake’s not loaded. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
2092 We wanted to visit and leaf nothing behind 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
2093 "There's no way you passed the Beam Deployment Test." 1.2532 0.06101 79 63 12 4
2094 You idiot! I said "tractor beam". That's the leaf blower! 1.2532 0.05829 79 62 14 3
2095 Just a little more to the right cadet! 1.2532 0.05544 79 61 16 2
2096 Nice going, you missed him 1.2532 0.06361 79 64 10 5
2097 I almost forgot our souvenirs. 1.2532 0.06101 79 63 12 4
2098 We will abduct him later. 1.2527 0.05086 91 70 19 2
2099 It's "Take me to your leader" dummy. Not "Take me to your leafer." 1.2527 0.05086 91 70 19 2
2100 This sucks. 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2101 Think you misunderstood, the boss said observe than pick-up and leave.” 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
2102 They still don't know cheap fuel when they see it. 1.2527 0.06171 91 75 9 7
2103 He’s herding them so carefully, they must be important. We’ll have to study them carefully. 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2104 He put them in a pile just for us. 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
2105 You're welcome! 1.2527 0.05086 91 70 19 2
2106 Since you're new to this we'll start with something small. 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
2107 It’s my way of saying thanks in advance for all the anal probing. 1.2527 0.06366 91 76 7 8
2108 "Let's do a leaf collection, teacher!" You said. Our planet doesn't have any trees, you moron 1.2527 0.05970 91 74 11 6
2109 Well, there’s something you don’t see every day. 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2110 I’ll bet he’s sorry to see those go. 1.2527 0.05086 91 70 19 2
2111 They have no idea how much these things are worth on Alpha Centauri. 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2112 Trolling the Earthling 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
2113 He's too happy to be afraid. 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
2114 Roomba XXXX 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2115 Oh my gosh look at us! We're picking up the leaves! We're just like the humans, "Hi my name's Albert, sure is a cold one" haha! Oh man this tour is awesome! Let's do the gutters next! 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2116 Have you ever done basement clean-outs? 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2117 They must be very valuable if he is herding, capturing and collecting them. 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2118 The reviews were right. Their service is out of this world. 1.2527 0.05970 91 74 11 6
2119 Don't sweat it! As far as the earthling's concerned, we're just another couple of illegal aliens doing landscaping work. 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
2120 Plus, it's so much quieter than a leaf blower. 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
2121 He gets only five minutes of help for that quarter. 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
2122 Of course they're valuable. Look at the stunned expression on this one's face. 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
2123 The sensor indicates that these are the “humans” we have been looking for. Let’s take a few for further study. 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
2124 Damnit. So close! 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2125 They must be special otherwise why would he be gathering them up? 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
2126 They keep gathering these, must be valuable. 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2127 Ummmm...you've pressed the eco mode again. 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
2128 Just over the fence to the right 1.2527 0.05970 91 74 11 6
2129 Let's drop it in his neighbors backyard and see what happens. 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
2130 Intergalactic Outsource Co. At your service. No task too small! 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
2131 Looks like Dyson is trying to one-up Elon Musk. 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2132 Let's steal them before they learn how to use them. 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
2133 I miss the old probing days 1.2527 0.05970 91 74 11 6
2134 You try parallel hovering and beaming at the same time! 1.2527 0.05762 91 73 13 5
2135 He doesn't know why he has to rake them into piles, and we don't know why we have to beam them up. 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
2136 I’d rather take the leaves. 1.2527 0.05086 91 70 19 2
2137 You have more than enough going on, let us do this for you 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
2138 No, I said ‘let’s LEAVE!’ 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
2139 This is the third time today, Mabel. I think we can both agree - you need eyeglasses. 1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
2140 Job’s gonna get a lot more difficult if they ever figure out the leaf-to-fuel conversion equation 1.2527 0.05086 91 70 19 2
2141 How lucky we came at harvest time. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
2142 We've got to find a more lucrative use for this ship. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
2143 Do you mind getting the dog poop too? 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
2144 Good, you chose the higher life form to study ! 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
2145 Unfortunately for Bill, space aliens do not yet have the technology to harvest leaves directly from trees 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
2146 The deal is - we do Fred's yardwork and he stops bugging us to probe him. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
2147 This time WE will tally the votes! 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
2148 Now once you’ve picked them all up, put them back on the tree 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
2149 They say their money grows on trees. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
2150 Now that you mention it, "take me to your leafer" doesn't sound right. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
2151 Santa said this is the guy who asked for a vacuum cleaner every Christmas since 1990 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
2152 They never learn. We raid this one every year just after harvest. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
2153 They spend hours collecting these so they gotta be good. 1.2526 0.04482 95 71 24 0
2154 You think he's happy now just wait to see his reaction when we come back this winter and clear the snow from his driveway. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
2155 You'd think they'd appear a little more grateful, wouldn't you? 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
2156 They just waste valuable organic matter. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
2157 It's a sign we come in peace. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
2158 If earthlings collect them they must be valuable. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
2159 I hate that you became a vegetarian, that human looks tasty. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
2160 Leaf long and prosper, my son. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
2161 These lazy earthlings expect illegal aliens to do their landscaping work. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
2162 This baffling human behavior requires further investigation. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
2163 I knew they were going to start outsourcing but from JUPITER!? 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
2164 Yep, just collected our first specimen. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
2165 I took the pile once. Now he LEAVES it for me every week. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
2166 So THATS why they’re called leaves 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
2167 I heard this helps with wildfires 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
2168 Get us out of here! 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
2169 You sure they said 'leafer'? 1.2525 0.05044 99 77 19 3
2170 How much for the front lawn? 1.2525 0.05044 99 77 19 3
2171 One small leaf-pile for a man, one giant leaf-pile for alienkind. 1.2500 0.05492 92 73 15 4
2172 This look is called "GRATITUDE. Next, I'll show you ANGER. 1.2500 0.05421 88 69 16 3
2173 Don't forget to come back for the snow. 1.2500 0.05492 92 73 15 4
2174 I'm sorry I'm going to have to fail you. You can try again next month to get your Abduction License. 1.2500 0.05175 88 68 18 2
2175 wrong ballots, idiot 1.2500 0.04916 88 67 20 1
2176 So then my dad says 'If you were really independent, you'd keep your planet tidy' 1.2500 0.06063 68 55 10 3
2177 I already tested the tall one. Let's see if there's intelligent life in the smaller, leafy ones. 1.2500 0.05492 92 73 15 4
2178 Gerald congratulated himself for making the bold decision to hire that new lawn maintenance company. 1.2500 0.04642 88 69 18 1
2179 Don’t forget my wife 1.2500 0.05883 88 71 12 5
2180 Now what will I pretend to do out here everyday? 1.2500 0.06101 88 72 10 6
2181 No mask... just take the leaves 1.2500 0.06485 72 58 10 4
2182 BE PATIENT, ALIEN IN TRAINING 1.2500 0.05657 88 70 14 4
2183 "I still say earthlings don't know what turning over a new leaf means if this all we ever see them doing for their planet" 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2184 These will be delicious with a little fresh garlic. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2185 Enough with the good deeds! 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2186 We have seen stranger forms of currency on other planets. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2187 Goop says kale is passé 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2188 This is so much quieter than leaf blowers. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2189 I bet he didn’t expect to get them back so quickly. - if at all 1.2472 0.06039 89 73 10 6
2190 This is the moment when Ted realized he's been doing this all wrong. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2191 Wait until you try them - the crunch is unbelievable! 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2192 I can’t wait to blow these all over Borg’s planet. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2193 Four Seasons Total Landscaping IS out of this world. 1.2472 0.06039 89 73 10 6
2194 He will keep telling this to everyone until they lock him up. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2195 They are very obsessed with these things. Let's beam some up to see why. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2196 They marketed it as more environmentally friendly than compost. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2197 It's minimum wage work, but better than nothing. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2198 The new Leaf Roomba is designed to look like a spacecraft. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2199 I bet you five Martian clams he doesn't even say, "thanks." 1.2472 0.06039 89 73 10 6
2200 Shake it off. Tractor beaming takes practice. I once sucked up a cow. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2201 Now I see why SpaceX bought the Roomba! 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2202 I know what he’s thinking. Can I order one of these from Amazon? 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2203 All these years, I thought it was “Take me to your leader.” 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2204 We don't want them on our yard either 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2205 Don’t you just love migrating and stealing jobs? 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2206 If I resell these on EGalaxy, I'll make, like 50 bingboinks easy. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2207 The humans are collecting this, it must be valuable. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2208 And you think this is the best chance of finding intelligent life here? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2209 These must be very valuable. He's collected every, single one." 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2210 You would think humans wouldn’t be this incompetent after so many years. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2211 Would it have killed you to do that before I raked them up? 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2212 They have no idea how much these are worth on Pluto. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2213 So nice of them to gather the food into such nice piles for us. It's so much easier to beam them up this way. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2214 Orders / Shmorders! This will make a great mulch for my raised bed on Zorplatd! 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2215 I told you not to snack between Saturn and Jupiter. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2216 Take me to your ‘leafer’??? Gort, let me see that Earthling phrase book you downloaded. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2217 Wait until he's back in the house before you spread them around the yard again. Best stress test ever for this species! 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2218 These toilet paper shortages have really gotten out of control. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2219 It’s the least we can do. No one will ever believe him again. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2220 Well, someone in the galaxy is making alternative fuels work 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2221 When it comes to providing help, it's best to start slowly. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2222 All this time he’s been blaming his neighbor 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2223 Bad aim. You keep abducting garbage. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2224 This job really sucks. 1.2472 0.04868 89 68 20 1
2225 If they go through all the effort of raking it up, it must be valuable." 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2226 You can jump into the next pile. 1.2472 0.04868 89 68 20 1
2227 We'll study these earthly offerings, keep the best specimen, and drop-scatter all the others back here later tonight. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2228 Remember our directive: Beams shoots and leaves. Or is it: Beam, shoot and leave? 1.2472 0.06039 89 73 10 6
2229 Why would he hoard them if they weren't worth a fortune? 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2230 I thought you guys came on Tuesday? 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2231 Well, I did say "the intelligent life." 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2232 See, honey, you just suck 'em all up and spit 'em on top of him. Haha! 1.2472 0.06039 89 73 10 6
2233 Hurry up Scottie! He worked hard collecting these things! Let’s go! 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2234 It's nice of him to collect them for us. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2235 I'm glad we waited for him to rake them into a pile. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2236 Close, thank you. But can you try again? I really must have that hat! 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2237 Twenty-five dollars seems to be a low price to perform this service. 1.2472 0.03494 89 74 13 2
2238 Since he clearly values them so much, he should feel friendly toward us once we've brought him a few more loads. 1.2472 0.06039 89 73 10 6
2239 Hey, we've got a small ship and a long trip. How about going a little lighter on the roughage? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2240 Yes, and bottles and cans on Thursdays. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2241 After the taste test, could you throw them back in another yard? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2242 I agree this is rarely worth it, but the payoff when there's a small child inside is huge. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2243 You need glasses... 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2244 I have no clue but they must be really tasty! 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2245 Take these to my neighbor !! 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2246 They taste great with blueberries and milk. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2247 One man’s trash. . . 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2248 It's the least we can do to repay him for picking his brain. 1.2472 0.06247 89 74 8 7
2249 I need them for my space crafts. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2250 When we arrive home we can burn these and roast potatoes in the fire. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2251 Lucky for us,they don’t know the value of leaves. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2252 Do you also do lawns? 1.2472 0.06039 89 73 10 6
2253 careful 6 feet apart 1.2472 0.05932 89 75 7 7
2254 I told them you were real,but no one would believe me. Seems they were all Trumpers. They only believe in the creatures from outer space Donald tells them to believe in. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2255 And to think they're still using petroleum. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2256 Ya need to leave a few, so it doesn't look unreal . . . 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2257 It's simply amazing how much this upsets them. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2258 I've always wanted to try composting. 1.2472 0.05247 89 72 13 4
2259 I think the earthling is grateful, but not particularly impressed. Show him what the heat ray can do. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2260 We can learn much from what they collect. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2261 This is not the fall we came to prevent. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2262 Yes. Leaves first. Then we probe him in his nest. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2263 Do you take Venmo? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2264 We’ll gain his trust by making him think this is a new Amazon service. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2265 Our instructions were to collect samples of all intelligent life forms 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2266 I hear they’re really fun to walk on, we can get him later. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2267 I told you Zorts, this is a perfect way to fit in with the locals 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2268 A little more up and to the right next time. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2269 They're so easily entertained. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2270 This new leaf blower is out of this world 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2271 After all these years, Jim is now certain that raking leaves is an intergalactic fools' errand. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2272 I dry them and encase in epoxy resin - part of my new mixed media project focusing on loss." 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2273 No point having superior technology if you can’t show off sometimes 1.2472 0.06247 89 74 8 7
2274 I think we were supposed to ask for their leader, not leafer. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2275 I know we're superior beings from light years away, but a job is a job. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2276 They won't evolve if you keep doing their work. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2277 He's going to figure out we took his dog last week! 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2278 He won't mind. They haven't solved the green energy puzzle yet. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2279 Eat shoots leaves. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2280 Ok, fine...but after this we leave. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2281 Interrogation should be easy; Heard they crumble just like that! 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2282 I'm really tired of Commander Blorg's scavenger hunts. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2283 I’m sure he said take me to your leafer 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2284 When we send them back, they won't remember a thing. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2285 Henry's Springtime efforts in training the Martians paid off in the Fall. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2286 qaparHa'bej "Take me to your leafer"! 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2287 Ah shoot, I missed. Can I have another $1? 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2288 Can you beam them back down into Miller's yard there? 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2289 Please don’t Leaf too soon! 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2290 We came all the way out here for the foliage? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2291 I think we're going to need another garden waste bag 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2292 Did he say "leafer' or "leader?" 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2293 This seems more productive than crop circles to me. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2294 There goes the element of surprise 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2295 They grow,collect,and store these things,it must be of high value. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2296 Is screwing with this guy's leaf pile really mission-related? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2297 You think he'll tip this time? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2298 Argh, you missed it again. Not the detritus, aim for the primitive tool holding the rake. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2299 They must be of value, the aliens put so much effort into gathering them! 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2300 Chores are universal. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2301 They're the smartest beings we could find here, ma'am. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2302 I hope he doesn't think we are going to come back again next weekend. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2303 Leave the leaves,take the leaves,see if I care! 1.2472 0.06247 89 74 8 7
2304 I know you’re tempted to turn the blower on. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2305 I know they said to take the human, but he doesn't make that nice crunchy sound! 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2306 Take me instead 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2307 We couldn’t take it anymore. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2308 Oh, the new robot vacuum cleaner is here. I'll be losing my job. 1.2472 0.05485 89 73 11 5
2309 I was skeptical at first, but this has been your best pandemic side hustle idea so far. 1.2472 0.06039 89 73 10 6
2310 The search for intelligent life continues post election 1.2472 0.06448 89 75 6 8
2311 ‘And no one will ever believe him’ 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2312 Check the gutters before you go. 1.2472 0.06039 89 73 10 6
2313 Did the president send you? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2314 I’m like 100% sure I packed the toilet paper. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2315 After his wife left him for his brother, his assistant was promoted over him and his cat moved next door, John thought his self respect had hit rock bottom. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2316 So then, are you gunna beam me down the mulch? 1.2472 0.04868 89 68 20 1
2317 We get to keep these AND he’s going to pay us to take them. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2318 Yes, there were easier leaf removal methods, but Todd was determined to impress the neighbors. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2319 This shall be the Fall of mankind. 🍂 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2320 Alright, nice. Next we’re going to practice parallel parking. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2321 We are going to be rich! 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2322 This planet is just the best for scrapbooking. 1.2472 0.04868 89 68 20 1
2323 The dead leaves really have more value than humans at this point 1.2472 0.06247 89 74 8 7
2324 That's how we can steal their jobs! 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2325 I said, 'Take your leave,' not 'le'—ah, forget it. 1.2472 0.06039 89 73 10 6
2326 Gorbzshog, we've been over this: Humans...you have to abduct HUMANS!! 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2327 Remember, we're only interested in the masters, not the slaves. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2328 When you said ‘cross-species start-up opportunity,’ I was picturing something more glamorous. 1.2472 0.04868 89 68 20 1
2329 I still can’t believe we were the lowest bid for this contract. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
2330 The aliens are leaving 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
2331 There goes Elon Musk’s Roomba again. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2332 Start small, or they’ll get suspicious. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
2333 I see he has one of our probes 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2334 We are not getting paid enough for this 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
2335 Yep, this is on brand for 2020. 1.2471 0.05775 85 68 13 4
2336 I always knew the leaf blower was an alien plot to colonize our planet 1.2449 0.05242 98 78 16 4
2337 This is the ONLY thing we can do to make them think we're friendly, trust me. 1.2447 0.04458 94 71 23 0
2338 14.7 light years per bushel. That's why. 1.2444 0.05765 90 73 12 5
2339 100 light years to get here and we’re stuck with leaf collection? 1.2444 0.05074 90 70 18 2
2340 We will study and understand this small shriveled lifeform. 1.2444 0.05765 90 73 12 5
2341 Step one: demonstrate technological superiority to the 'leaf blower'. Step two: demand unconditional surrender. 1.2444 0.05978 90 74 10 6
2342 Sometimes I just like to mess with them. 1.2444 0.05074 90 70 18 2
2343 Good -- we only take the most intelligent life forms from this planet. 1.2444 0.05978 90 74 10 6
2344 He's got a green thumb so we could be related. 1.2444 0.05544 90 72 14 4
2345 It's the least we can do after the year they've had. 1.2444 0.04822 90 69 20 1
2346 Your technology sure beats mine! 1.2418 0.05708 91 74 12 5
2347 Where have you been all my life? 1.2414 0.06110 87 72 9 6
2348 Only beam up intelligent life. 1.2414 0.05656 87 70 13 4
2349 Anal probes are out. Four Seasons Total Landscaping is in. 1.2414 0.05414 87 69 15 3
2350 Watch his reaction when they get spewed all over his yard! 1.2414 0.04895 87 67 19 1
2351 Otherwise he'd have to bag them. 1.2414 0.05656 87 70 13 4
2352 Less weight, no stupid conversation. Good choice!! 1.2414 0.05161 87 68 17 2
2353 Poor bastard's got nuthin to do now the rest of the day! 1.2410 0.05309 83 65 16 2
2354 The salad stuff looks a little off, but the thing with the weapon looks kinda juicy. 1.2410 0.05309 83 65 16 2
2355 We leaf you in peace. 1.2410 0.05836 83 67 12 4
2356 Stupid humans! They just rake up the warp speed leaves and discard them! When will they learn? 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2357 I feel bad stealing this guy's lunch. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2358 A rake? I swear, some of these humans are so primitive. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2359 I just don't feel like probing today. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2360 They must be worth something. Why else would they pick them all up? 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2361 We are from the town. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2362 Drop your probe, Earthling. We leave in peace. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2363 I mean - we're literally raking it in 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2364 They blow dry them and then comb them, they must be important. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2365 Hand-raked. Extra crunchy. Environmentally friendly. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2366 We could put those guys with leaf blowers out of business! 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2367 Everyone collects them, they have to be the key to survival! 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2368 If you really want your licence, Rachel, next time aim at the human! 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2369 They seem to have excellent reproductive abilities. 1.2386 0.04570 88 67 21 0
2370 His wife will never believe him when he tells her what happened. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2371 Great. Now they’ll ALL want this level of service. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2372 Yes, I know we need roughage but I could really go for some meat." 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2373 They have the best leaves. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2374 HEY! Knock it off, you guys! This is the first job I've had in ten months! 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2375 I wonder if they remove snow? 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2376 This is the last of what I need for that Fall craft I saw on TikTok. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2377 Immigrants-they get the job done! 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2378 Cleaning up leaves, this was a great idea to earn extra beer money while we are still putzing around on this class 3.B.2 planet. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2379 These must be valuable. Earthlings collect them every year. 1.2386 0.04570 88 67 21 0
2380 Why cannot we collect them at the curb anymore? 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2381 I know plant-based is better, but where do we put the probe? 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2382 Well considering how long it took him to round them up, he doesn't seem to be too concerned. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2383 This is the fall of Earth. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2384 So, this is your answer when your son asks 'What did you bring me'" 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2385 Because he hired me to, that's why. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2386 Introducing our new Leafraypickup Garden Service for a low introductory price.. This offer ends with the eclipse. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2387 I told you there was money to be made in this. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2388 Surely not all the leaves are brown. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2389 Nah, he won't report a UFO sighting. He just thinks he lost his job to automation. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2390 I dare you to try it on the human. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2391 Does this incremental income even cover the cost of fuel, let alone vehicle amortization? 1.2386 0.04570 88 67 21 0
2392 Don’t blame me. I clearly said “Take me to your leader!” 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2393 What's all the fuss about rakes? 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2394 We always volunteer here around the holidays 1.2386 0.04570 88 69 18 1
2395 It's a lawn tractor beam. 1.2386 0.06259 88 74 7 7
2396 All I’m saying, Jeb, is if I would have known that this is what I’d be doing at 40, I wouldn’t have gotten that degree in anthropology. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2397 It s for my wife . She scrapbooks everything ... 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2398 Wrong button again honey 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2399 Wanna leave here and go home 🤩🤘🏻 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2400 Take it or leaf it for all I care 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2401 Let’s hope there’s another one of those kid-shaped meatballs in this pile. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2402 Maybe if we clean up this mess he won't notice we've stolen a cow from him." 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2403 Did you forget your glasses again? 1.2381 0.04972 84 65 18 1
2404 Leave the Earthling. Take the leaf matter. 1.2381 0.06017 84 69 10 5
2405 Then we hover over his neighbor’s yard and hit ‘blow’. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2406 Do you think they'd mind if we took more? 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2407 You’d think that guy would be freak’n out by now. 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
2408 They're light, crisp, and very tasty. 1.2381 0.06017 84 69 10 5
2409 Quickly, before the curator shows displeasure. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2410 They're for my kid. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2411 No wonder they can't balance a budget; they burn all their money. 1.2381 0.06017 84 69 10 5
2412 Waaaait a minute -- why is he making this so easy? 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
2413 When we get home we’re going to be so rich! I can’t believe true; their streets are really paved with leaves. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2414 That's not what I meant when I said we should be leaving now. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2415 Don’t beam the tall one, as there’s no intelligent life within. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2416 Yeah, and the sky is grey - so what's your point? 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2417 you do indeed come in peace 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2418 Crap, I wish they took me. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2419 You’d think he would be happy but listen to his brain waives, he’s so annoyed. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2420 I am all for world domination! But let's try winning their hearts and minds for a change . 1.2381 0.04972 84 65 18 1
2421 Beam them up ,Scotty 1.2381 0.06017 84 69 10 5
2422 Great! They have the crispy ones. G.O.A.T. road trip snack! 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2423 They must be good...they all gather them at this time of the year. 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
2424 We should go back to making them rake to the curb. 1.2381 0.06017 84 69 10 5
2425 Earthlings are a little smaller than I expected. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2426 A little to the left. 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
2427 I told you the Roomba was our way in. 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
2428 Not as tasty as their famed cow pies. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2429 This leaf blower is out of this world” 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2430 Thanks, but that was last year's ask. Would you be able to provide vaccines for Covid-19 and Earth's next 10 pandemics, instead? Odds on the Georgia Senate elections would be great, too. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2431 Does your county recycle ? 1.2381 0.04972 84 65 18 1
2432 Close son, but the one holding the rake is actually the more intelligent one. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2433 Your aim has really been terrible on this trip! 1.2381 0.04972 84 65 18 1
2434 This ought to get them to believe in the Rapture. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2435 Rake these, sucker! 1.2381 0.06017 84 69 10 5
2436 Maybe he's not trying very hard to stop you, but it's still stealing. 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
2437 This leaf farmer seems to almost want us to take his harvest. 1.2381 0.04972 84 65 18 1
2438 Heh heh, we’re raising the dead.” 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2439 This is the best planet ever for mulch. 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
2440 I'm tired of the pale, squishy ones, let's try something crunchy. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2441 You wouldn't believe how much this saves us on rectal probes. 1.2381 0.06017 84 69 10 5
2442 This really sucks. Back in the day, we had cattle mutilations, anal probing – I loved going to work! 1.2381 0.06250 84 70 8 6
2443 Leafcoin...? I'm in. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2444 They claim to want proof of alien technology, but sometimes l think Earthlings are just using us" 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2445 This wall will stop illegal aliens from taking our jobs, they said. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2446 He thinks we're just after leaves 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
2447 Tell me again how composting is so economical. 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
2448 The humans are a waste. We can use the leaves 1.2381 0.06250 84 70 8 6
2449 See I told you only illegal aliens would want to do this job. 1.2381 0.06017 84 69 10 5
2450 um. . . thanks? 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2451 After the fall, they rise. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2452 And I drop them again from 1,000 feet above 1.2381 0.04972 84 65 18 1
2453 You said you wanted a salad. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2454 Humans are gathering these. We should study them. 1.2381 0.05253 84 68 13 3
2455 They told us to ‘help save the planet’ 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
2456 Collector items always have high value. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2457 Are you sure we were supposed to say "Rake me to your leader?" 1.2353 0.06183 85 71 8 6
2458 I said “take me to their leader,” not “leafer.” 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2459 Can we leave now? 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2460 Just remember, it was my idea to expand our landscaping business to other planets! 1.2353 0.06183 85 71 8 6
2461 It’s a good thing these don’t smell better than the ones that dog left. 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2462 They must be valuable since the Earthling was collecting them. 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
2463 If the fusion engine ever dies, we have to switch to mulch power. 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2464 We need to work on your aim, Zorlak. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2465 This is great! Can you come back in December? 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2466 All the leaves are brown...and those guys are grey." (And when I go to church...I'll pretend to pray. 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2467 I miss the fall 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
2468 I guess it was worth the probe? 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
2469 Custom dictates we dump these in the neighbor's yard 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
2470 Are you a space Roomba? 1.2353 0.06183 85 71 8 6
2471 It's fun to mess with them, but they're not smart enough to make good pets. 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2472 Now let's go dump these in Q's yard. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2473 Why can you never pick the right subject?" "Why can you never keep the craft steady? 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2474 Analysis will determine why Earthlings never read the message in our leaflets. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2475 "OK, that's the Autumn Leaves. Next one is Tiptoe Through the Tulips." 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2476 Dammit the death ray is malfunctioning again. 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
2477 Are you sure we were ordered to "leaf" the planet? 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
2478 MulchMartians 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2479 What was the directive . . . If you're spotted, leave or just get spotted leaves? 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2480 They must be valuable. Everyone seems to be collecting them. 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
2481 Hold on a sec. The human said he wants to get his wife. 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2482 Aim a little higher. 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
2483 Little does he realize he's next. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2484 We'll see why they collect them, spread them, burn them, or give them to the truck. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2485 He looks angry - this must be an important resource. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2486 Is he even going to say thank you? 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2487 Are these really Whitman's Leaves of Grass? 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2488 So that's why aliens are leafy green... 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2489 They’ll worship us like gods. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2490 Why does he look shocked? We told them the second Thursday of November. 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
2491 Really Dave? You spent all this money on a new leaf vacuum? 1.2353 0.05331 85 70 11 4
2492 Yeah, like he's going to voluntarily come with us because you helped him with his chores... 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
2493 It's great in risotto. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2494 Let's take our leaves. 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2495 We might as well make a few bucks on the side while we’re here. 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2496 Oh, nerts, we forgot the leaf bags. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2497 At least it's easier than crop circle duty. 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2498 Not yet, Klatu. We’ll erase his memory after he pays us. 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2499 Nothing like the pyramids they used to build, but oh well ... 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2500 I told you there was leaf on earth 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2501 I told you it would work. Bialar and Dengar's Leaf Service. Goldmine. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2502 We mean no harm. Our ship leaves in peace. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2503 Oh, snap, when you told me we could leave soon this isn't what I had in mind! 1.2353 0.06405 85 72 6 7
2504 Not the leaves! We want the Earthling! 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2505 Sauteed leaves in a garlic butter cream sauce... again?! 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2506 I can't believe he just piled this up for us. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2507 Our newest vacuum, it's out of this world! 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2508 They are always collecting these things, they must be worth something. 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
2509 $20 bucks a yard, we'll be rich! 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2510 Here’s your lousy $600 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2511 I think we will only need half a tank. 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
2512 Leaving is always the hardest. 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2513 I’m ok with this-but only if you compost. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2514 Just when you thought things couldn’t get any weirder. 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
2515 What? My dog jumps in them! 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2516 The leaves will be gone by spring. Can you take me instead? 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2517 Are you sure these are the stacks we are supposed to collect? 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2518 I told you they had take out 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2519 If they collect them, they MUST be useful 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
2520 If only Steve let me borrow his leaf blower 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2521 I’ll take the serf with my turf, thank you. 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2522 That's what I call U-F-Oliage 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
2523 The show’s in its last season, time to grab memorabilia from the set. 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
2524 In an effort to keep up with the Jones', Bob invested in the Leaf-o-Matic 3000 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2525 Finally, a cooperative specimen. 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2526 Should we tell them this is fuel yet or wait another century? 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2527 Finally, an intelligent life-form. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2528 They’re outsourcing everything these days 1.2353 0.04474 85 67 17 1
2529 Don't worry, he'll just blame it on the booze. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2530 It ain't the dominant species, you know. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2531 I think the smell reminds me of Nvortny in the morning. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2532 First, we capture his precious leaves and the human comes willingly. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2533 We come in leafs. 1.2317 0.04846 82 66 14 2
2534 Well, there's one thing off his honey-do list. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2535 Still in their pre-leaf blower stage. No threat here. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2536 Excellent, excellent... now we can leaf. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2537 Leaf him alone. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2538 Are you sure it is "Take us to your leafer" and not "Take us to your leader"? 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2539 With all these specimens, we can knock off early. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2540 I've certainly seen better offerings, but maybe they can't afford anything better. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2541 I don’t think he’s piling them because they’re precious, he seems too calm. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2542 He was never gonna finish the job without our help. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2543 These are good samples of their food. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2544 At least , he should thank us. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2545 Apparently we keep finding the ones without smartphones. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2546 Your aim leaves much to be desired. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2547 You’re never going to get your flying license if you keep missing the target. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2548 This guy has no idea what's coming. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2549 See? Money does grow on trees on this planet. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2550 Thanks fellas. Don’t forget the front. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2551 If the humans are gathering them together, they must be valuable! 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2552 The probing will be much less disgusting. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2553 How exactly are we supposed to package and dispose of this alien poop again? 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2554 I would have thought with our advanced technology we could have gotten better jobs than yard work. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2555 Thank the heavens he’s raking, not blowing. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2556 Darn it, Zog, you've turned us into an interstellar Roomba. 1.2317 0.06086 82 68 9 5
2557 Stay right there, I'm going to go get my wife. 1.2317 0.04688 82 63 19 0
2558 And for Gary, this was the only option left after the association banned leaf blowers 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2559 Gravity is overrated! 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2560 Why did you tell him that we were coming in peace?! 1.2317 0.04999 82 64 17 1
2561 Rack! A Whitman sampler? How you call it, 'Leaves of Grass.' 1.2317 0.06086 82 68 9 5
2562 Did he pre-pay? 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2563 10 billion miles, and headquarters wants a bag of leaves!! 1.2317 0.04999 82 64 17 1
2564 I didn’t expect this when we volunteered to help other planets. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2565 These must be very valuable,or why would they constantly collect them? 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2566 The leaves will tell us more than the people. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2567 I wonder if they'll get that big pile of leaves out front, too? 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2568 These will look lovely pressed into our memory book. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2569 Takeover phase one: make yourself indispensable. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2570 Should we save them for the trip home or eat them now? 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2571 Good planet to start a landscaping business? 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2572 Why those? Because we’ve already probed him. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2573 How would you feel about sucking up dog poop? 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2574 That Roswell Yard Service sure goes the Extra Mile. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2575 Look. They crumble right in your hands! Earth is ours! 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2576 Let's take leave of this place. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2577 I heard him say, get out, leaf at once. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2578 One alien's trash is another alien's treasure. 1.2317 0.06086 82 68 9 5
2579 Back home the kids will love to play in this stuff. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2580 I think our leaf blower is making a good first impression. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2581 We fall for this every year. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2582 They said get a sample, this is a sample. Now, let's go. I have something at 7. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2583 Hey, I specifically ordered a leaf BLOWER. I'm done with on-line shopping! 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2584 We've been going nuts spending lockdown squeezed into this UFO. 1.2317 0.06086 82 68 9 5
2585 Don't worry Bob. Eventually everyone will get used to the idea of outsourcing. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2586 Well, that makes my job a whole lot easier. 1.2317 0.06086 82 68 9 5
2587 Maybe one day we’ll discover other uses for it. 1.2317 0.04999 82 64 17 1
2588 Another gender reveal gone wrong it seems 1.2317 0.06086 82 68 9 5
2589 Through simple acts of kindness we gain social license. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2590 Alright now you can either spread ‘em out across his yard or you can try to screw with his neighbor. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2591 your aim sucks. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2592 The enhancements made to the 2021 Roomba are great! 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2593 They really gotta work on their banking security systems 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2594 At least something exciting happened in 2020 1.2317 0.04999 82 64 17 1
2595 Another human saved from the mysterious and pernicious "HOA" entity. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2596 „When you thought robots wouldn‘t take over your job“ 1.2317 0.06086 82 68 9 5
2597 So they think COVID-19 is fake news? Then they'll never believe this! 1.2317 0.06086 82 68 9 5
2598 You got that close and still couldn't zap the human, pl-ease! 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2599 I like to pile it on the ground in front of them to remind them of their inferiority. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2600 Still more efficient than a leaf blower. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2601 If they like our trash so much, maybe they’ll take Trump too. 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2602 Not quite the help for humanity I had in mind.... 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2603 They don’t seem to be struggling. Autopsies are bound to be easier on these things, right? 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2604 We need to work on your aim. Next we'll try your skill at parallel universe parking 1.2317 0.05833 82 67 11 4
2605 I told you they think it's garbage 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2606 Let’s give the earthling more leaves and watch him lose his mind. 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2607 As if the squirrels weren't enough of a problem. 1.2299 0.05593 87 71 12 4
2608 Yep, this spaceship sucks! 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2609 They must be valuable if the earthlings spend so much effort gathering them together 1.2289 0.04946 83 65 17 1
2610 Are they valuable? Yes, I told you, I know what I’m doing. 1.2289 0.05235 83 66 15 2
2611 We have discovered a willing source of mulch. We don't even have to become planet overlords! 1.2289 0.04946 83 65 17 1
2612 I say let's take him. The kids love a good dissection. 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2613 They want us to leaf. 1.2289 0.05235 83 66 15 2
2614 Can you believe that money just grows on trees here? 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2615 I said, beam ME up. Who cares about the leaves? 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2616 I want to burn them when we get home. I hear they smell good. 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2617 You have some major OCD, Bzizok." 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2618 I prefer the other meaning of “To serve man.” 1.2289 0.04946 83 70 9 4
2619 He'll be looking for us on Angie's List when it snows 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2620 This is the guy who complained about leave blowers, right? 1.2289 0.05235 83 66 15 2
2621 No. Leave. Earth! 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2622 How would you even do an anal probe on a pile of leaves? 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2623 It does grow on trees, sir, but I don’t think it’s money. 1.2289 0.04946 83 65 17 1
2624 The chancellor has requested the really crunchy ones. 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2625 They Rake, We Take! Another sign of our "superior" intelligence. 1.2289 0.04640 83 64 19 0
2626 Leafing is the hardest thing to do. 1.2289 0.06018 83 69 9 5
2627 Any Galorkian who tells you they pay for mulch is a total Flupnaran. 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2628 We agreed to perform a few menial tasks now and then, and they agreed to look the other way when we probe a few farmers. 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2629 City Services have really gone high tech 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2630 They must be valuable; everyone is gathering them together in small piles near their homes. 1.2289 0.04640 83 64 19 0
2631 To be completely honest Dave, I feel like this might be a scam. 1.2289 0.04946 83 65 17 1
2632 We heard you had a rough 2020 and wanted to give you a hand. 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2633 I hope he doesn't think we're leaving him out. 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2634 We also leaf in peace” 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2635 After their last orbit, it's the least we can do. 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2636 When’s you next eye appointment? 1.2286 0.06163 70 57 10 3
2637 The other life form stupid 1.2286 0.06163 70 57 10 3
2638 Dude, your aiming skills is on par with the Stormtroopers 1.2286 0.05817 70 56 12 2
2639 This beats my last job: anal probing. 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2640 He thought you said, take me to your leaf eater. 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2641 You can tell -- he is one of the ones that wants the brand name iRobot. Silly. 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2642 Now he'll think we're illegal aliens. 1.2262 0.05179 84 67 15 2
2643 I think we have a problem with the intelligent life beamer. 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2644 I hope they go with green. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2645 He doesn't seem to be pleased with our peace offering. 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2646 Clearly they use that lower lifeform to congregate them into communal mind-melding. 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2647 will he wash our windows while we are fueling up with Mulch 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2648 Any planet can make a leaf blower. But a leaf sucker. . . 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2649 I hate this damn Keto diet, Klaatu. 1.2250 0.06156 80 67 8 5
2650 I think we found the planet's most intelligent species. 1.2250 0.05024 80 63 16 1
2651 If you don't want them we'll take them. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2652 We are battling the fall of human civilization. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2653 We're more advanced. Our leaf vacuums are noiseless. 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2654 God damn aliens took my job and the wall did NOTHING to stop them! 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2655 It’s the least we can do after all the probing we did on the guy. 1.2250 0.05329 80 66 11 3
2656 No, really.. he said we could take all of his underlings. 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2657 Apparently, you have taken me to their leafer. 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2658 After abducting him for 20 years, the least we can do is save him an hour of yard work. 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2659 Rupert was amazed at the town's new leaf collection system 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2660 Easy, Hank. You’re gonna jam the mulcher again. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2661 'Tis the season 1.2250 0.06156 80 67 8 5
2662 Klebdar, you're just going to reinforce the idea that illegal aliens are taking their jobs 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2663 Gee, if I knew aliens were interested in my raked leaves, I would've put the cat in the pile. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2664 You're getting the hang of it son, now move a little to the right. 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2665 Did the Captain say leave or leaf. 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2666 These small planets are delicious but you have to be careful to clean them first. 1.2250 0.06408 80 68 6 6
2667 I hope they compost. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2668 They have to be valuable since they collect them so carefully. 1.2250 0.05024 80 63 16 1
2669 Every year they collect thousands of them so they must be important. 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2670 I said leader, not leafer. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2671 If you blow it from one yard to another, you can harness their infuriation. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2672 I can't believe they throw these delicious things away " 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2673 We finally found the planet where money grows on trees. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2674 It's fine. He's been disconnected from other humans so long he probably thinks that we are his gardening partner in a new device. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2675 These things make a great wrap for a tasty human. 1.2250 0.06156 80 67 8 5
2676 You don’t need to put out food or water, but you do need to help clean their cages. 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2677 No wonder our property taxes keep going up . 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2678 Mom said,we needed more fiber in our diet 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2679 The fun part comes when we put them back in his front yard. 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2680 Hit, ‘Mulch.’ 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2681 Reverse the beam. These leaves are stale. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2682 An unexpected perk of asking aliens to leave. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2683 If Scottie hadn't beamed him up back then, we wouldn't be stuck with this job. 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2684 Gosh, now I know why this new yard service is so expensive! 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2685 Do you think he gets it that we are leafing him? 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2686 This might be the first time an illegal alien has actually taken his job 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2687 I still worry that our switch to dead leaf currency won't make us all rich but just lead to rampant inflation." 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2688 Could you guys go pick up the deadwood on Pennsylvania Avenue? 1.2250 0.05329 80 66 11 3
2689 Climate emergency is real. Let’s preserve fall, before it’s gone forever! 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2690 Not to worry! Our instructions were clear: Leave none of them behind.” David B Smith Miami Beach, F 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2691 How much for weekly maintenance? 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2692 OK, the one without OCD should operate the tractor beam. 1.2250 0.06156 80 67 8 5
2693 That leaf pile is too small to jump into! 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2694 They're obsessed with hoarding these things...they must be very valuable. 1.2250 0.05024 80 63 16 1
2695 Is this how you do an unemployment program on Mars? 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2696 See if you can snag that big thing next to them. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2697 No sign of intelligent life in any of these life forms, so far. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2698 The Humans are Always gathering them up; they Must be Important! 1.2250 0.06408 80 68 6 6
2699 Thanks, but I was going to jump in “my” pile. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2700 Bill was tired of foreigners stealing his job. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2701 He's had a rough year, it's the least we could do. 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2702 This ought to teach that hoarder a lesson he will never forget! 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2703 These new drones really do everything. 1.2250 0.05024 80 63 16 1
2704 This is what they call "Taking annual leave" 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2705 Humans are collecting these crunchy things - beam them up - we must analyze their importance 1.2250 0.06156 80 67 8 5
2706 Take us to your litter 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2707 I know they're not fresh but the closest supply is 2 million light-years away and I'm not going back just for you. 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2708 No one