Contest #730


Cartoon

730

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “And, when you get hungry, the cafeteria is to your right, left, left, right, left, straight, right, straight, left, and then you push on the big lever.”
  2. “They tell me your family has been doing lab work for generations.”
  3. “I bet you also had to be twice as smart as the men.”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2020-10-25T21:28:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2020-11-08T22:30:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2020-11-02T22:29:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued November 9, 2020
Number of captions 8241
Number of responses 55362
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 I'm the only one commenting on your name, Dr. Katz? 2.1765 0.08238 119 39 20 60
1 Dr. R. O. Dent, I am happy to report that our experiment using Bleach was 98% successful in eradicating the infestation in the White House! 2.0000 1.00000 2 1 0 1
2 It's an honor to be working with someone who was in on the ground floor of the research. 2.0000 1.00000 2 1 0 1
3 I was wondering if you could say something today about the importance of cheddar, not any chedar, but our own Wisconsin cheddar. 2.0000 0.57735 3 1 1 1
4 Professor Morgan, I have the lab results from the last week's clinical trials on your genetic experiment to create a super-smart... Uh, Professor? 2.0000 0.57735 3 1 1 1
5 Says here, you have a lot of lab experience. 1.8261 0.18493 23 11 5 7
6 I'm impressed by how quickly you made it here, doctor. This lab is a maze. 1.7692 0.16923 26 13 6 7
7 Yes, with this serum you'll return to the lab rat pool, but no one can ever take away your Ph D. 1.7500 0.47871 4 2 1 1
8 If you're free after work, I know this hole-in-the-wall place you'll love. 1.7500 0.15105 28 13 9 6
9 For the last time, Bob, I don’t know who moved your cheese. 1.7273 0.17632 22 11 6 5
10 For lunch why don't we go to that hole in the wall place you like. 1.7188 0.12077 32 13 15 4
11 I'm also the first in my family! 1.7143 0.17103 21 10 7 4
12 Right on time! Everyone else complains this basement is a maze. 1.7097 0.13274 31 14 12 5
13 It's a triple-blind study. 1.7059 0.20588 17 9 4 4
14 Just got the lab results in regard to the side effects 1.7059 0.18718 17 8 6 3
15 Congrats on your promotion. No hard feelings, right? 1.7000 0.14690 20 8 10 2
16 It's an honor to be working with you Sir. Sorry about the shrieking and screaming earlier. 1.6800 0.16042 25 13 7 5
17 This is awkward. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
18 Once again, solving the maze doesn't make you co-author. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
19 Well with your experience in carrying the plague and the recommendation from Mister Eisner, I'm sure you'll be of great service here at the U.S. Army Medical Research Institute of Chemical Defense. Welcome aboard. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
20 Sir, can I be your Guinea Pig? 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
21 I understand you're already familiar with the lab set-up. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
22 It's an honor to work with someone who made it out of the maze. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
23 Just because an experiment succeeded in humans, does not mean it will be effective in mice. 1.6667 0.19803 18 10 4 4
24 It's really helpful having an insider's perspective. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
25 We have good news and bad news. By the way, have you looked in a mirror lately? 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
26 The job description said I would be working with lab rats not for them! 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
27 'I'm sorry Doctor, it's just tofu.' 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
28 Yes, I do like to experiment. Say more. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
29 I'm your new ethicist. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
30 Something’s gone terribly wrong. Have you looked in a mirror? 1.6667 0.21390 18 11 2 5
31 I have good news and bad news. On the good side, the vaccine is safe and effective. On the bad side, the recipients develop a taste for cheese and a distaste for cats! 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
32 Sorry. Nothing personal, but I never date people I work with. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
33 There are some concerns about your objectivity. 1.6667 0.18687 15 7 6 2
34 I"m proud to be known as the first woman on your research team. But humility compels me to decline being honored also as the first woman to try your experimental formula. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
35 The environment is a little tough to navigate, but once you figure it out it becomes immediately rewarding. 1.6667 0.66667 3 2 0 1
36 The good news is, you should have no trouble finding your way out of the parking lot. 1.6471 0.17023 17 8 7 2
37 I do think we need to tell the vaccine volunteers about the side effects. 1.6429 0.19910 14 7 5 2
38 Eureka! You're Covid-free and your hearing is 87% sharper. 1.6429 0.13289 14 5 9 0
39 Your success in the maze precedes you. 1.6316 0.13702 19 8 10 1
40 Now that science doesn't matter, I guess anything is possible! 1.6250 0.20156 16 9 4 3
41 Whoa, looks like I’m the new Lab Rat now. 1.6250 0.17970 16 8 6 2
42 I'll amend the side effects profile right away, Sir. 1.6250 0.22127 16 10 2 4
43 If you give a mouse a lab coat, he is going to ask for some beakers. 1.6190 0.17561 21 12 5 4
44 It's just that not many in your classification have asked about our retirement plan. 1.6190 0.17561 21 12 5 4
45 I think we are ready for the human trials. 1.6190 0.16148 21 11 7 3
46 I just wanted to apologize for the incidents with you and your family before your promotion. 1.6154 0.21299 13 7 4 2
47 I love your Halloween costume, Bob. 1.6154 0.24122 13 8 2 3
48 Do you have any other laboratory experience besides successfully opening your cage? 1.6111 0.16447 18 9 7 2
49 I must have taken the placebo 1.6111 0.20031 18 11 3 4
50 I hope you didn't have too much trouble finding your way here. 1.6111 0.18327 18 10 5 3
51 We just felt like you could relate to the test subjects better than we could. 1.6111 0.16447 18 9 7 2
52 We have the maze ready for you, professor. 1.6000 0.19024 15 8 5 2
53 Your parents must be so proud of you after all the sacrifices they made to get you here. 1.6000 0.16330 15 7 7 1
54 This is why we normally test the vaccine on mice first. 1.6000 0.19024 15 8 5 2
55 You probably won't believe me, but I always thought the maze was a stupid idea. 1.6000 0.16859 20 11 6 3
56 I wanted to talk with you about revising the "how to get here" section of our website. 1.6000 0.40000 5 3 1 1
57 And where did you do your training? 1.6000 0.16859 20 11 6 3
58 Sorry, but upon further consideration the committee thinks there may be a conflict of interest in your hire. 1.6000 0.21381 15 9 3 3
59 Like you always say about our experiments: We'll see how they run, see how they run. 1.6000 0.21381 15 9 3 3
60 This is taking lab rat to a whole new level 1.6000 0.21381 15 9 3 3
61 As you may have heard, we promote from within. 1.6000 0.19024 15 8 5 2
62 How does this sound? 'Product tested BY laboratory mice?' 1.6000 0.16330 25 15 5 5
63 Before you ask...yes I am a real mouse, no I am not LITERALLY from here, no I don't know the guy over there lost in the maze, yes I am quite comfy in my tie and lab coat, yes I have my PhD in all the things and no you can't see my tail or touch my ears...OK? Great! Now back to this vaccine! 1.6000 0.26667 10 6 2 2
64 I just kept turning left. Why do you ask? 1.5909 0.16979 22 13 5 4
65 Yes, doctor; today we finally break the cheddar ceiling. 1.5882 0.21107 17 11 2 4
66 I started as a lab rat. It's all about who you know. 1.5882 0.19287 17 10 4 3
67 I'm sorry, but experience as a research subject doesn't count toward a degree. 1.5882 0.19287 17 10 4 3
68 I'm still not convinced there's any market for instant cheese... 1.5833 0.19300 12 6 5 1
69 I know I said I'd take the vaccine if you took it first, but... 1.5833 0.22891 12 7 3 2
70 Based on your progress, I'd say the drug works. 1.5833 0.19300 12 6 5 1
71 I see no reason we can't roll out the vaccine by Election Day. 1.5833 0.22891 12 7 3 2
72 Why, no, Professor, I never have seen the movie 'The Fly'. Why do you ask? 1.5833 0.19300 12 6 5 1
73 The vaccine is perfect, except for one small side effect. 1.5833 0.19300 12 6 5 1
74 I'm sorry, I've never worked with a lab rat before 1.5833 0.22891 12 7 3 2
75 Dr. Mauci, this is the special White House blend you asked for...we're calling it, "the big cheese". 1.5789 0.19218 19 12 3 4
76 Glad you found this place, sometimes it’s like running through a maze!” 1.5714 0.22761 14 9 2 3
77 I understand you grew up around here..... 1.5714 0.13725 14 6 8 0
78 I didn’t hear you come in, you’re as quiet as... 1.5714 0.20203 14 8 4 2
79 Which vaccine did you test again? 1.5714 0.17271 14 7 6 1
80 And, of course, we would expect you to try the vaccine first. 1.5714 0.13725 14 6 8 0
81 We've successfully recreated the moment Jeffrey Toobin took his dick out on a Zoom call. 1.5714 0.20203 14 8 4 2
82 I apologize for what happened before your promotion. 1.5714 0.17271 14 7 6 1
83 So long as you don't mind a few pricks and prods, I think we'll make a great team. 1.5714 0.20203 14 8 4 2
84 I’m glad to see they promote from within. 1.5714 0.13725 14 6 8 0
85 Sorry about your relatives. 1.5714 0.20203 14 8 4 2
86 There‘s something I‘ve always wanted to ask you. How did your parents meet? 1.5714 0.20203 14 8 4 2
87 I see HR is taking their new ‘Promote from Within’ initiative seriously for once. 1.5714 0.20203 14 8 4 2
88 I don't think I said "three blind," but, if I did, I'm sorry. I meant double-blind. 1.5652 0.16426 23 14 5 4
89 Professor, you have clearly proven that people eventually become the object of their attention. 1.5625 0.18186 16 9 5 2
90 Good news! We isolated the mutant gene! 1.5625 0.20349 16 10 3 3
91 So, You are our new lab rat. Welcome to the treadmill. 1.5625 0.20349 16 10 3 3
92 The new glasses kind of make you look like a giant mouse in a lab coat. 1.5625 0.20349 16 10 3 3
93 Well, this is quite a promotion for you!" 1.5556 0.16612 18 10 6 2
94 Just sit tight while I find the antidote... I'm sure it's here somewhere. 1.5556 0.16612 18 10 6 2
95 Yes. You do have to attend the diversity training. No exceptions. 1.5556 0.14512 18 9 8 1
96 HR said lab rat isn’t pejorative. 1.5500 0.18460 20 13 3 4
97 We have successfully completed the vaccine trial on republicans, so we can confidently start testing on mice. 1.5500 0.16975 20 12 5 3
98 Technically, we said the vaccine had no ‘known’ side effects. 1.5455 0.24730 11 7 2 2
99 Like you said. There are no side effects. 1.5455 0.20730 11 6 4 1
100 OH RATS!! — Sorry...it's an old habit. 1.5455 0.20730 11 6 4 1
101 Welcome, Dr. LaBrat. I believe you'll find our facility squeaky clean. 1.5455 0.20730 11 6 4 1
102 I'm sorry Eric, it's over. You're just not the same man I fell in love with. 1.5455 0.20730 11 6 4 1
103 Let me just say that the trajectory of your career path here in the lab it truly inspirational to all of us. 1.5455 0.20730 11 6 4 1
104 It looks like we took the experiment a bit too far. 1.5455 0.20730 11 6 4 1
105 I think he’s still gonna recognize you, Dr. Fauci. 1.5455 0.20730 11 6 4 1
106 This job is a huge upgrade from my old one. 1.5455 0.20730 11 6 4 1
107 As you've already deduced, you did NOT receive the placebo. 1.5417 0.15902 24 15 5 4
108 Look on the bright side. The other two are blind. 1.5385 0.21529 13 8 3 2
109 I'm sorry to tell you this Ms. Welton, but you're under qualified. 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
110 Sorry boss, point well taken, and I promise we won't experiment on your cousins next time... 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
111 Your group of Ivy League graduates weren't given the Placebo. 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
112 Well, well, all that testing and look at you now. 1.5385 0.21529 13 8 3 2
113 No, Chen, it's not an insult. We're all lab rats here. 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
114 Actually Mickey we are working on the corona virus and your trying to make a better aged cheddar cheese. 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
115 Yes, Professor, we're only distributing the new Vaccine to Republicans 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
116 It’s just an standard agreement. Nothing to worry about. 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
117 It is quite evident that you are the G.O.A.T. of lab rats. 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
118 Hi Dennis - did I catch you at a good time? 1.5385 0.24325 13 9 1 3
119 You've been watching too many Jeff Goldblum movies... 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
120 Yes, Sir. We lab rats will have our report ready in the morning. 1.5385 0.14391 13 6 7 0
121 Nice to meet you at last. I met your parents a couple of experiments ago. 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
122 Let's test the vaccine on humans and then we'll know if it's safe for mice! 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
123 I’m sorry professor, you parents reacted poorly to the drug trial. 1.5385 0.18311 13 7 5 1
124 Yes,we encountered that side effect in our vaccine trial. 1.5385 0.21529 13 8 3 2
125 Glad you found the lab. This place is like a maze! 1.5385 0.21529 13 8 3 2
126 My data says your wife will be fine, please don't worry! 1.5385 0.14391 13 6 7 0
127 I have to say, you are one of the best dressed lab mice I’ve ever worked with. 1.5385 0.21529 13 8 3 2
128 We think you should test it on yourself, first. 1.5385 0.14391 13 6 7 0
129 It’s always great having post-docs with lived experience. 1.5385 0.24325 13 9 1 3
130 I think maybe I should go to the press conference. 1.5333 0.19190 15 9 4 2
131 Thankfully none of your cousins are showing any side effects 1.5333 0.19190 15 9 4 2
132 Yes, even the CEO started out in the mailroom. 1.5333 0.21529 15 10 2 3
133 Some of your relatives are involved in our testing procedures. 1.5333 0.19190 15 9 4 2
134 Would you like to volunteer for this next test? 1.5333 0.19190 15 9 4 2
135 We’re so excited to have someone who can guide us through the maze of government regulations! 1.5333 0.19190 15 9 4 2
136 What were you before this experiment started? 1.5333 0.15013 15 10 3 2
137 So what made you decide to switch sides? 1.5333 0.16523 15 8 6 1
138 Where’s Dr. Johnson? 1.5333 0.19190 15 9 4 2
139 Gary, don’t lie. It’s pretty obvious you tasted what was in the beaker. 1.5333 0.19190 15 9 4 2
140 The fact that you worked your way up from an entry level position is such an inspiration to me. 1.5294 0.19398 17 11 3 3
141 You must be the new Disney representative. 1.5294 0.19398 17 11 3 3
142 Uh. I signed up for wine tasting. 1.5294 0.15141 17 9 7 1
143 Are you sure you don't have relatives working here? 1.5294 0.17400 17 10 5 2
144 It looks like the vaccine is ready for distribution 1.5294 0.19398 17 11 3 3
145 And you started at the bottom? Well look at you now. 1.5294 0.15141 17 9 7 1
146 Look's like you made it through the maze. 1.5294 0.17400 17 10 5 2
147 My conclusion is Yes, size matters. 1.5294 0.19398 17 11 3 3
148 Great job in the maze. If you pass the treadmill test, the job is yours. 1.5294 0.19398 17 11 3 3
149 I'm sure it's reversable. 1.5294 0.17400 17 10 5 2
150 I don't want this to come across as virtue-signaling, but I'm really not comfortable testing cosmetics on animals. 1.5294 0.17400 17 10 5 2
151 I heard the lab was hiring from within! 1.5294 0.19398 17 11 3 3
152 Jeffrey Toobin masturbated during a zoom meeting this week. 1.5294 0.19398 17 11 3 3
153 Please take a seat. The big cheese will be here shortly. 1.5263 0.19298 19 13 2 4
154 I'm impressed you found your way here so fast! 1.5263 0.14035 19 10 8 1
155 We found a cure! Oh, and you're single again. 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
156 The promotion tracks at this place are really encouraging! 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
157 Don’t you understand why you keep getting the runaround ? 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
158 Good news, Professor! Despite being unable to use lab rats for testing, my man-to-mouse formula has proven to be a success! By the way, how was your coffee this morning? 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
159 I don’t want you to feel trapped or stuck. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
160 Your duties here will be on a straight and narrow path. 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
161 That's right, we do all our experimenting on cats. 1.5000 0.23028 12 8 2 2
162 I'm afraid the tests show that someone slipped you a Mickey. 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
163 The good news is your lab coat fits perfectly. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
164 Sorry I'm late. I'm having trouble learning my way around the building. 1.5000 0.23028 12 8 2 2
165 Believe me, they were all volunteers. 1.5000 0.16667 18 11 5 2
166 I called you in because there's a maze involved. 1.5000 0.26726 8 5 2 1
167 No offense, but I don’t think what you took was the placebo. 1.5000 0.16667 18 11 5 2
168 Next time let's inject the Human DNA into Mice. 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
169 Tax evasion is the real end of the labyrinth. 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
170 Are you certain all subjects got their Clorox shots before you started the Trial? It's important to the White House that they're guaranteed germ-free. 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
171 Your son is amazing, but I don't think we can use him for this one. 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
172 Hey, I remember you! 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
173 And you think I'm spending too much time in the Lab. 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
174 I've been asked to lead this study due to your inherent bias. 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
175 You're absolutely right, I haven't worked in the lab as long as you have. 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
176 Where’s the maze? 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
177 The experiment worked! Whether it was a success is objective. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
178 We know the side effects so let's test for efficacy. 1.5000 0.23028 12 8 2 2
179 #MyNewYorkerCaption. 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
180 Lab tests show you got the sweet mouse face while our leader got the brain. 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
181 Yes, I have been sampling the mouse pheromone drug, you cutie 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
182 And they say owners look like their dogs.... 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
183 Yes. I did know your parents. Funny story. 1.5000 0.15811 16 9 6 1
184 It's my understanding that there are some things that lawyers just won't do. 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
185 I Don't think Doctor, that using humans as Guinea Pigs is such a good idea. 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
186 You look familiar. Have you worked here before? 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
187 I feel like we've met before... Maybe in another lab? 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
188 We are excited about your first day too, but I just want to talk to you briefly about what we have in the cages... 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
189 It doesn't count as animal testing if you're my height. 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
190 That’s a good start, you found your way to the lab. 1.5000 0.11471 20 10 10 0
191 I do really like you, but we’re not changing your dissection date. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
192 This part of the maze requires you to cure cancer while using proper pronouns. 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
193 Good News! This vaccine will not be trsted on mice. 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
194 Sir, the cheese is for the little ones. 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
195 They told me that I'd be working with someone who had been genetically designed to conduct scientific research, but I just assumed they were engaging in hyperbole. 1.5000 0.22361 6 3 3 0
196 My, doctor, what big ears you have. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
197 It's not that I don't date mice, I just don't believe in office romances. 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
198 The people in the cages are complaining that all they have to eat is cheese. 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
199 I haven't seen you since I was an undergrad and you were a test subject. My, how far you've come! 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
200 It’s an unfortunate side effect, but you now have 70% immunity to Covid. 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
201 Look at you. I remember when you were just a little rat runt 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
202 Well, on the bright side you're now the Big Cheese. 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
203 Still can't believe I get paid 80% of your salary 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
204 Your intimate knowledge with scientific experiments is a great resource for me in this work on mice and Covid 19! 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
205 Sir, it is a real honor to work for someone with your laboratory experience 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
206 Oh yes, Dr. Ratagain. I have wanted to meet you ever since I read your works back in 2020. Thank you for this opportunity to work with you. 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
207 So, what's your pronoun? 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
208 I understand you came up through the ranks. 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
209 Mickey, you were amazing." 1.5000 0.26874 10 7 1 2
210 Okay, maybe there was one side effect I should have mentioned. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
211 No sir, I'm not working on a better mouse trap. 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
212 You looked...tinier on your application. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
213 '... and you say you've tested this yourself?' 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
214 Our vegan-inducing drug is ready to go to trial, and fifty cats from Change Your Nature’s (CYN) psych ward already signed up. 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
215 Think you are identifying too much with the subjects of our tests 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
216 Sure, I'll do the maze, but do I get to pick the cheese? 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
217 You said the side effects would be minor. 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
218 Amazing, sir— you’ve uncovered yet another way to spread disease. 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
219 I told you to stop experimenting on mice...Karma, man... 1.5000 0.14575 18 10 7 1
220 That last dose was plainly too great! 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
221 Well, Kevin, when a man loves a woman they have very special feelings for one another and something very special happens and she becomes a mommy. Your mommy was a very pretty mouse and your father no longer works for the university. 1.5000 0.23028 12 8 2 2
222 Of course, if I'd known he was your brother, I would have treated him differently. 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
223 We're 97.5% there. 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
224 I was at a dead end until I studied your work on maze theory. 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
225 You don't look like you photograph on Match.com 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
226 Well umm..no, you didn't get the placebo." 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
227 Glad you took one for the team. 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
228 It's Doctor Minnie Mouse, if it's all the same to you. 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
229 So I think the side effects of our Covid vaccine are acceptable, you? 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
230 Yes, the mousetraps are catch and release. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
231 The committee hasn't decided what your role will be in the next round of testing 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
232 In Control Group A, the results show removing cell phones from the subjects produced increased anxiety, depression and fear. 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
233 The data suggests that you’re a lab rat. 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
234 „Let me guess, another experiment about cheese?“ 1.5000 0.16667 18 11 5 2
235 No, no side effects, just a slight headache, what about you? 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
236 Congratulations on your Nobel Cheese Prize. 1.5000 0.18524 18 12 3 3
237 Weird...all the cheese was missing from the mazes again this morning! 1.5000 0.12127 18 9 9 0
238 Yes sir, as advised, we have replaced the lab rats with lawyers. Beside the fact that lawyers are more numerous, we found that the lab techs were getting too attached to the rats. 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
239 It's good to see there is upward mobility in research these days! 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
240 I know, I know! But, how cool would it be if you won a Nobel prize? 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
241 This is going to be awkward. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
242 You are almost there, about 3% more to be just like me, then you are just like us, Disney family. 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
243 Well, let’s look at the positive, at least you didn’t lose your sense of smell for dairy! 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
244 God, they grow up quickly nowadays! 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
245 I just wanted to express my condolences for your 600 nieces and nephews.” 1.5000 0.23028 12 8 2 2
246 The last one we called Algernon. 1.5000 0.15811 16 9 6 1
247 You want to build a better what? 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
248 I've narrowed it down to three possible co-workers who could be stealing my cheese sandwich every day 1.5000 0.23028 12 8 2 2
249 « So this is the Lab Ethics form I mentioned. » 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
250 Now that you've found your way out of the maze, the real work begins. 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
251 thank you boss 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
252 Sorry about my jumping up on the chair a minute ago. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
253 OK, in this experiment you can play the doctor and I'll be the shy lab assistant. 1.5000 0.26726 8 5 2 1
254 It's inspiring to the young mice here to see a role model. 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
255 Well, not ALL ears, but close 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
256 I’d be happy to show you around. It’s like a maze in here. 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
257 Seems there's been a little glitch with the mouse cloning experiment. 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
258 Ooooh. while an afternoon running through a maze in search of “that perfect cheese“ does sound delightful, company policy says I can’t date the subjects of my experiments. 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
259 Why do you want to go right to the human trials? 1.5000 0.23028 12 8 2 2
260 Any chance you can navigate a lawsuit? 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
261 Oh--I thought they called you that because you spent so much time in the lab. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
262 I love mazes, will that be next in the orientation? 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
263 How did you get started in lab research? 1.5000 0.18898 8 4 4 0
264 You look like you know your way around a lab. 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
265 Well,the preliminary results show that it does prevent cancer in humans. 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
266 I'm sure you'll have no trouble finding your way around. 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
267 I don't mind going on another date... But do we have to eat cheese again? 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
268 Yes I would be pleased to discuss my findings over a cheese plate. 1.5000 0.20300 14 9 3 2
269 I'm new here, sir. Should I address you as Michael or Mickey? 1.5000 0.26874 10 7 1 2
270 Professor, the American specimen refused to travel through the maze and find the cheese. It declared to have some sort of lactose sensitivity. 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
271 Now that you're hired, I'd like you to run a few tests. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
272 I like you too, Gary, but have you heard of the Stockholm Syndrome? 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
273 You were already here before your apprenticeship? 1.5000 0.28868 4 2 2 0
274 A hundred per cent success rate, Doctor. All the cats died. 1.5000 0.17014 20 13 4 3
275 You have certainly exceeded our expectations. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
276 I’m so glad our company no longer conducts animal testing—it was so cruel to the rabbits and guinea pigs. 1.5000 0.15811 16 9 6 1
277 I hope you'll find the academic treadmill more rewarding than your last one. 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
278 I only found the cafeteria thanks to your insight and mentoring ...this really IS a maze! 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
279 If you need anything, I'll be in my office--down the hallway, then left, left, left, second right, right again, left, right, and left. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
280 We don't know yet, of course, but I'm guessing you weren't given the placebo. 1.5000 0.17384 14 8 5 1
281 The Director has asked for your participation in another capacity for this experiment. 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
282 At least I’m not the only one who forgot my mask. 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
283 Sir, the results are in...you are NOT the father 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
284 And you say this has been peer reviewed? 1.5000 0.70711 2 1 1 0
285 The results are in! Looks like you just squeaked through. 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
286 It isn’t like Tom to be late. Have you seen him? 1.5000 0.22361 10 6 3 1
287 After all, we're not so different from each other 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
288 Small world! I used to work with your brother Mickey. 1.5000 0.15076 12 6 6 0
289 I think I know who moved my cheese 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
290 We may never know which one of us was in the placebo group. 1.5000 0.16667 10 5 5 0
291 Let me just be the first to say that we’re all so impressed with how far you’ve come. 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
292 Our new employee was born and raised here 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
293 Yes, I appreciate your background, but I'm afraid you're overqualified. 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
294 You remember that show HOUSE? Yeah, they based the main character off of me. Artistic liberties were taken. 1.5000 0.34157 6 4 1 1
295 Would it make you feel better for me to call them lab rodents? 1.5000 0.26874 10 7 1 2
296 ...and I’m afraid this next test is a conflict of interest for you doctor. 1.5000 0.15811 16 9 6 1
297 Can I join the Ninja Turtles again? 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
298 Your rash seems to have cleared up overnight” 1.5000 0.70711 2 1 1 0
299 Do you ever think, maybe we’re in a cartoon? 1.5000 0.14575 18 10 7 1
300 Oh yes, we definitely promote from within! 1.5000 0.15811 16 9 6 1
301 We have strict rules against researchers testing on themselves, but in your case I think we can make an exception. 1.5000 0.19462 12 7 4 1
302 I’ll let you take things from here, Dr. Mouse. We both know last time I was in charge things did not go as expected. 1.5000 0.50000 4 3 0 1
303 Our genomes are strikingly similar! 1.4737 0.17718 19 13 3 3
304 Some drinks and cheese after work does sound good. 1.4706 0.17400 17 11 4 2
305 You're pregnant 1.4706 0.17400 17 11 4 2
306 Hi, I'm Catherine, most folks just call me Cat. 1.4706 0.19398 17 12 2 3
307 If You Give a Mouse a Degree 1.4706 0.17400 17 11 4 2
308 I'd say the laboratory animal rights activists were highly successful. 1.4706 0.17400 17 11 4 2
309 No, we’re not ready to push the vaccine yet. This isn’t some Mickey Mouse organization. 1.4706 0.17400 17 11 4 2
310 Welcome! I’m Kat...with a K. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
311 Gene, have you been editing? 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
312 Why yes I did try the one marked LSD. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
313 I'd love to go to the corn maze with you. 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
314 So it's agreed we'll order our pizza with lots of extra cheese. 1.4667 0.13333 15 8 7 0
315 I have been meaning to talk with you about this new covid vaccine we are trying on mice.... I mean rats. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
316 Professor, the Dean asked me to let you know that there have been several complaints of species discrimination from your students. 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
317 But I don't want to run around in a cage with lots of mysterious partitions. 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
318 Thank you for agreeing to take the first coronavirus vaccine doctor ... it seems to have only one minor side effect... 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
319 Looks like the other guy got the placebo !! 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
320 According to our results the ends do indeed justify the means. 1.4667 0.13333 15 8 7 0
321 Your previous lab experience is amazing 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
322 I don't think that was a micro dose Kevin. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
323 Of course the cheese you seek in this maze is tenure. 1.4615 0.18311 13 8 4 1
324 Hey, Algernon! How was your nap? 1.4615 0.14391 13 7 6 0
325 That's funny, I had you pegged as an auditory learner. 1.4615 0.18311 13 8 4 1
326 ‘I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but… there have been some unexpected side effects.” 1.4615 0.14391 13 7 6 0
327 If you have no concerns about experimenter bias, I'd say this new project is a go! 1.4615 0.14391 13 7 6 0
328 Dr. Nichols, it’s because of you that I became a lab rat. 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
329 No use spinning your wheels over this. 1.4615 0.14391 13 7 6 0
330 Professor, you’re not hearing what I’m saying. 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
331 I think we’re ready to test this on humans, Dr. Algernon. 1.4615 0.18311 13 8 4 1
332 Side effects include acceleration of the food chain. 1.4615 0.14391 13 7 6 0
333 It's beginning to feel like I'm trapped in a maze. Can you relate? 1.4615 0.18311 13 8 4 1
334 You look amazing!The side effects are hardly even noticeable on a man as regal as you President Trump! 1.4615 0.14391 13 7 6 0
335 Forgive me. I normally do this on a chair while screaming. 1.4615 0.18311 13 8 4 1
336 Sorry, this clinical trial vaccine trial does not correct mousetakes. 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
337 Isn't it funny they made you the head of the research lab before they gave me equal pay? 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
338 Clinical trials in humans might be a way off Bob. 1.4615 0.18311 13 8 4 1
339 We're hard at work to incubate a suitable partner for you. 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
340 Any trouble finding your way around–sorry, of course not. 1.4615 0.18311 13 8 4 1
341 The results are in. I can see you’re all ears. 1.4615 0.18311 13 8 4 1
342 I'm sorry, I feel like I need to experiment with other mice. 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
343 No thanks, I don’t think I’ll try the experimental dose too. 1.4615 0.18311 13 8 4 1
344 So you want to inject the Cats with bleach? 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
345 The research is cutting edge, the safety protocols not so much. 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
346 Cute, but that's not what masking means. 1.4615 0.14391 13 7 6 0
347 PhD or no PhD, you still have to run the maze again. 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
348 Again with the mouse-splaining! 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
349 Ok the lab results are in... the baby is not yours 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
350 The human subjects are waiting for you in the maze, Dr. M. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
351 I hope you realize how important you are to our research. 1.4545 0.15746 11 6 5 0
352 Could you change back before I start screaming? 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
353 You want me to be a subject in your experiment? 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
354 Wait, are you really big or am I really small? 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
355 Hmm. We’ve never really used cats for the lab tests but I suppose it’s worth considering. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
356 So-Am I correct in presuming that theses extracts are from lab raised humans? 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
357 I'm glad I'm working with someone that I don't have to worry about masks or social distancing. 1.4545 0.15746 11 6 5 0
358 This moonshine you’ve been making sure has gotten to one of us. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
359 Wow! They're really serious about diversity. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
360 Glad you got out of being experimented on, earned a Ph.D., and that you're the one to do the experiments. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
361 I hear you started at an entry-level position, too. 1.4545 0.15746 11 6 5 0
362 The least you could do is to clean up your own turds. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
363 And sir I respect that you’ve worked your way up. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
364 The good news is that the new cure has worked. However, there are some side effects we need to think about. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
365 Mrs. Brumley's CAT scan is tomorrow so you might want to take the day off. 1.4545 0.15746 11 6 5 0
366 Your test came back negative. 1.4545 0.15746 11 6 5 0
367 May I say Sir, your rise, from unpaid intern to head of the lab, is inspirational! 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
368 You look familiar. 1.4545 0.15746 11 6 5 0
369 The tests are complete....all the genes are murine 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
370 Well, we were really underestimating your potential in that maze, weren't we? 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
371 I can’t get away from the feeling we’re just both diversity hires 1.4545 0.24730 11 8 1 2
372 I knew this job would be a rat race, but I didn't know I'd have to race a rat. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
373 But sir, I'm not sure the FDA will consider our results unbiased. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
374 I take it your self-test didn’t turn out as planned. 1.4545 0.15746 11 6 5 0
375 Thanks, again, for testing it on yourself. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
376 I suggest we go straight to human trials. 1.4545 0.15746 11 6 5 0
377 Mouse jeans? What were you thinking? 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
378 Is it true you ratted me out for being ,"cheesy"? 1.4545 0.24730 11 8 1 2
379 'Yes, I understand that. But it did cure the dry cough.' 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
380 To be honest, I think we're waaaaay past informing the ethics committee about our work. 1.4545 0.24730 11 8 1 2
381 Joe, when did mouse symptoms first appear? 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
382 Per CDC orders, the vaccine will be tested on humans first. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
383 Rats! These human experiments are not working out. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
384 I have to confess something, and before I do, let me just say I had no idea it was your cousin. 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
385 Their union leader, I presume? 1.4545 0.20730 11 7 3 1
386 Yes, but are you a man or a mouse? 1.4545 0.15746 11 6 5 0
387 There was a slight mix-up in the vaccine trial you volunteered for. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
388 I think this vaccine is not quite ready. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
389 Welcome. I understand you've spent your whole life in a lab. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
390 Dr. 599, it's been such a pleasure watching you grow and rise in the ranks. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
391 I don’t think this is enough to pause the trials. 1.4444 0.16612 18 12 4 2
392 First, let me explain the 'oopsie' in the lab involving your pill minder and then I'll tell you why all the mirrors have been taken down. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
393 Congratulations Professor! I see that your vaccine trial was successful. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
394 Remember the good old days when all we had to do was run around in a cage?. . . 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
395 Yes sir, I set them all free in the meadow this morning. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
396 Unfortunately, we could not find the tiny people you requested 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
397 I feel it’s time we spoke about your work-life balance. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
398 Well, you certainly landed on your feet after getting laid off at Disney World. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
399 Pardon me sir .... but the data does not add up. I smell a rat! 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
400 That is correct sir, the committee and I suspect a certain bias in the data 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
401 Yes, I think my ears are starting to grow. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
402 Yes, doctor, I can see you were not part of the placebo group. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
403 We're not going to get anything done if you keep eating every piece of cheese meant for the experiments. 1.4444 0.16612 18 12 4 2
404 I'm a big fan of your treatise on maze dynamics, Professor. 1.4444 0.16612 18 12 4 2
405 It's so inspiring how you worked your way up from the bottom, sir. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
406 Well, boss, I have noticed a change in you since that bleach injection. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
407 It's still a triple-blind study. 1.4444 0.16612 18 12 4 2
408 I'm told you like to hire from within. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
409 No! Your iced tea was on the left! 1.4444 0.16612 18 12 4 2
410 This may sound crazy, but I'd like to re-do the experiment without using cheese." 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
411 You did very well on the maze but I’m sorry we can’t grant you tenure. 1.4444 0.16612 18 12 4 2
412 I'm just guessing, Todd, but I don't think you got the placebo. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
413 And, of course, neither of us will know which is the control. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
414 I'm guessing you weren't in the control group. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
415 So, you found your way out of the maze then? 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
416 So, to fast-track this vaccine, are you sure we should skip the rodent testing phase? 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
417 I don’t know. You weren’t ‘all ears’ the last time. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
418 Actually, I knew your parents when the experiment first began. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
419 Sorry to let you down but I just could not figure out the maze 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
420 I see you are supervising the Covid-19 Human Challenge Trials for a vaccine? 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
421 So, yes, my findings clearly indicate that humans are the real rats. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
422 But boss! What big ears you have. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
423 If you're okay with the side-effects, I think we've got a winner. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
424 When they said I'd be working with mice, this isn't exactly what I had in mind. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
425 Now this has worked on mice, it's time for human trials. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
426 Why? Because we like you. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
427 I told them your species would eventually evolve! 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
428 I’ve learned so much working with mice in the lab. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
429 I take it you've filled out the conflict of interest form. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
430 I took three of those yesterday, and now you look like a mouse. 1.4444 0.11785 9 6 3 0
431 Yes, the 4 cheeses are a great incentive! 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
432 I've never worked with anyone who had better rapport with the subjects. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
433 Didn't I test mascara on you last week? Nice to see they're finally hiring internally. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
434 Yes, we DID adjust test results to account for anthropomorphism. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
435 You've come a long way since your maze days. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
436 Congrats on working your way up! 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
437 Yes, I can see the new vaccine had some unanticipated side effects. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
438 Leslie, please stop reminding me I was made in one of your tubes. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
439 The vaccine worked well in the controlled test in humans. But we have to do further testing to be sure if it will be as effective in mice. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
440 I apologize for calling you a lab rat, Dr. Maus. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
441 You’ll be happy to hear that the cafeteria is doubling the amount of cheese on its menu. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
442 You try it first. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
443 No, Dr. White. While your lab experience is indisputable I must insist, cheese is not the desired result. 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
444 I'm sorry if they were your ancestors. I was just following orders 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
445 Charles, maybe I should be the one to deliver the news that bubonic plague is the cure for COVID. 1.4444 0.16612 18 12 4 2
446 Doctor when you volunteered they did say the vaccine might have underlying effects 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
447 Not many interns get this far 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
448 Well, let's say I'm self-taught 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
449 We started from the bottom, now we're here! 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
450 You know some of my best friends are mice 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
451 : Excuse me. Could you step into Room 2 please? 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
452 If I'm being honest, it's both rewarding and depressing that my former test subject is now my supervisor. 1.4444 0.24216 9 6 2 1
453 sorry, I guess they didn’t tell you in the interview.... 1.4444 0.17568 9 5 4 0
454 My brother is a gym rat. 1.4375 0.15729 16 10 5 1
455 We will have to test on humans first, of course, before we give it to mice. 1.4375 0.18186 16 11 3 2
456 We’re thrilled that The National Federation of Lab Rats has agreed to be part of this study!! 1.4375 0.18186 16 11 3 2
457 This weekend I know where we can do a corn maze and then scamper right over to a cute little hole-in-the-wall bar. 1.4375 0.18186 16 11 3 2
458 Morale in this room has improved by 50% since we switched to lab cats. 1.4375 0.12809 16 9 7 0
459 I know it’s a bit of a maze getting here. 1.4375 0.12809 16 9 7 0
460 We've received some complaints about nepotism. 1.4375 0.15729 16 10 5 1
461 After you see the results, you may want to rethink cutting corners. 1.4375 0.15729 16 10 5 1
462 We're skipping animal trials for the vaccine. Time to #FindSomething New? 1.4375 0.15729 16 10 5 1
463 We can definitively conclude that you were not given the placebo. 1.4375 0.15729 16 10 5 1
464 No sorry, I have not seen your children." 1.4375 0.18186 16 11 3 2
465 Who told you I was looking for a little tail?" 1.4375 0.18186 16 11 3 2
466 No, I prefer a mild cheddar. 1.4375 0.15729 16 10 5 1
467 Congratulations on making department head! 1.4375 0.18186 16 11 3 2
468 Are those new glasses? 1.4375 0.20349 16 12 1 3
469 You solved the maze - I got it - but I was still planning on running this experiment. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
470 I’ve added ‘an increase in adorability’ to the list of possible side effects. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
471 Is there a doctor in the mouse? 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
472 I’m going to need a urine sample. 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
473 Eur-eek!-a 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
474 It's nice to have someone with your laboratory experience join us. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
475 Not to worry. They're all asymptomatic. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
476 I studied your work in medical school. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
477 May I say that it's an honor to work under the scientist who solved world hunger by figuring out how to clone cheese? 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
478 So just to clarify: the WiFi password is 'ch33se'? 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
479 No. I wasn't expecting someone with a tie. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
480 I told you not to try the latest COVID-19 vaccination until it had been tested. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
481 Tell me about your work. I’m all ears. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
482 And exactly what makes you think our clinical trial has been compromised? 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
483 I'm afraid the maze development subjects have walked off the job and they're refusing to negotiate with anyone but you. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
484 We can’t know from the lab results for humans that the vaccine will be effective for mice. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
485 I would just like to say that I LOVED your studies on large pieces of cheese. 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
486 haha.... no I have no idea where the missing LSD sample is professor. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
487 Doctor, I’m afraid you’re starting to identify with our test subjects again ... 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
488 I’m so sorry, I really didn’t think they would mind 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
489 Sir, about those trial vaccines... 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
490 Your work experience with fleas is very impressive. We’re so happy to have you join our disease research team. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
491 When we assigned you to the “control” group, we didn’t actually mean that you’d be in control of this experiment! 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
492 It's slower going with the other mice... 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
493 Now, about the maze... 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
494 You know your way around already. Just ring the bell if you need anything. 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
495 No, we never use tissue samples from mice. These are all from cats. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
496 This is the beginning of the new rat race. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
497 I am from the FDA and we need to ask a few questions about who got tested 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
498 And all of a sudden I see Jeffrey Toobin’s member on the zoom call 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
499 We're always delighted when former specimens come back to visit us. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
500 Mice experiments? What mice experiments? 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
501 No, it's not that. I just have a policy of not dating co-workers. 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
502 Professor Jefferson said one pill makes you larger, one pill makes you small, but these are tubes. 1.4286 0.15430 7 5 2 0
503 They never talk about Of Mice and Women. 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
504 So I see our first test tube baby is a big girl now! 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
505 Of course I can simplify my explanation: Squeak squeak-squeak-squeak, squeak squeak-squeak-squeak. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
506 we got no adverse affects from testing this with people, so it should be safe to put in cheese. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
507 I feel we should address the elephant in the room . . . 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
508 Of course it's impressive, it's just not a Freshman lab experiment. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
509 I don’t want to blow your cover, Super Mouse, but you’re going to have to test this vaccine. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
510 I can see how this experiment may lead to some moral issues for you... 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
511 Yes, I was a bit of a lab rat in grad school, too. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
512 We're hoping you can navigate the regulatory maze. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
513 Behind Every Smart Mouse Is A Even Smarter Woman 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
514 Just don't get into a trap. We need the vaccine quickly. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
515 I have some good news, Algernon, and some bad news. 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
516 The vaccine will keep you from getting covid but there is a side effect. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
517 I know you're new here but you look familiar. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
518 You may have to jump through hoops to get things done around here, but you'll never have to run a maze. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
519 I’m frightened the admin may be setting a trap for you sir. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
520 we'll bring the cats in next 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
521 We're always happy to have Alumni come back to the program 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
522 Dr. Mauci, we have a problem. The President wants the vaccine tomorrow 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
523 I don't want to be presumptuous but I noticed a few missing cheese samples... 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
524 "I feel so much better with you on our ethics committee." 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
525 We know the vaccine works on humans, but we'll need more testing to make sure it's safe for mice. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
526 Sorry; when I said that the "lab rats" had been busy, I didn't mean it to be personal. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
527 Sorry Rod, but we ran out of mice to test the new vaccine on. As per your contract, you're next in line. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
528 You want me to eat 20 pounds of cheese a day so we can learn if it is harmful to mice? 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
529 Next, we’ll reviews your Maze performance results. 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
530 I’m so sorry, I wasn’t aware they had a union rep. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
531 Professor, I don’t want to jump to any conclusions, but do you know anything about my missing cheese sandwich? 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
532 My grandfather experimented on your grandfather. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
533 Let's discuss 'Of Mice and Men' 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
534 Up for shots!?! 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
535 You may want to carefully go over your notes on the last lab experiment — and then go look into a mirror … 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
536 We embrace diversity in this organization. Miss Jones 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
537 Thank you for being part of the Phase 1 trial. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
538 ok, go ahead.. i'm all ears 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
539 Thanks for registering for the covid vaccine trials. Do you have any underlying conditions? 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
540 I just need you to sign this conflict of interest form 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
541 Now let's see if we can turn you back. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
542 Good news. Waking up and discovering you’ve turned into a giant mouse can be dropped from the list of side effects. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
543 Good news: we found the cure for cancer! Bad news: human cancer. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
544 It would appear that the gene splicing experiments are progressing more quickly and successfully than expected..... 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
545 This lab is a maze. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
546 Glad you found your way here. That actually was the experiment. 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
547 You know the protocol. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
548 I think its time you consider stepping down 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
549 Alright Doctor, just to clarify, I’ll be put in a maze and will navigate the pizza through sheer sense of smell? 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
550 Woman: I thought you were working at Disneyland? 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
551 Of course, they’re still going to kill you at the end of the experiment, but aren’t the lab coats cool? 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
552 For a lab rat, you’re doing a pretty good job 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
553 Yes doctor, I hid your dinner in the maze just the way you like it. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
554 Your office is just down the hall to the left, then right, then right again, then left, then right, then straight, then left, left again, then right... 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
555 I tested these on the lab humans 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
556 Well, it looks like we can stop testing on your nieces and nephews and move on to testing with MY nieces and nephews. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
557 I've always admired the way you worked your way up in the company. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
558 Hear me out... plant based cheese additive for today's busy house mouse. 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
559 Good news, Dr. Mouse: Our study shows that the concept of a mouse in a lab coat is an inherently funny premise which requires no caption. Frankly, to add one would merely take away from the silliness and would probably kill the joke. Also, you have cancer. 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
560 Well, that PhD diploma definitely changed you! 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
561 Oh well oh well! Look who’s going to the science fair this year ! 1.4286 0.29738 7 5 1 1
562 When I said I needed you in the lab, the isn’t exactly what I had in mind... 1.4286 0.20203 7 4 3 0
563 Someone chewed all of our research. 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
564 Welcome to the lab, I am going to give you a quick tour because this place can be like a maze. 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
565 I really like the way this organization promotes from within. 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
566 May I be so bold as to say your research is the cat's meow? 1.4167 0.22891 12 9 1 2
567 I must say, sir, you are a remarkable rat success story. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
568 Really? I started out in the lab, too. 1.4167 0.22891 12 9 1 2
569 Dr. Fauci, I know you're under pressure, but I think we should tell President Trump that the COVID vaccine might have some side effects. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
570 Wow, you really showed Darwin. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
571 There are new rules about including yourself in the lab experiments. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
572 We finally isolated the virus. It was a maze of possibilities. 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
573 You say you’re ready for testing on humans. Can I see your lab notes. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
574 When they asked me if I was ok with working with lab rats, this is not what I imagined. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
575 Don't I know you from somewhere? 1.4167 0.22891 12 9 1 2
576 My dissertation topic was “How to Solve a Maze”. 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
577 Apologies, I meant to say, “lab subjects.” 1.4167 0.22891 12 9 1 2
578 Yes the drug has some sidoffects. 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
579 Interesting. Now let's see what the next vial does. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
580 So you found the lab rat room huh? 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
581 CAN YA HEAR ME NOW? 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
582 Have you opened the box yet, Dr. Schrödinger? 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
583 Which one did you drink? 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
584 I don’t know what to tell you, Sir. This was not one of the 897 side effects we’ve seen to date. 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
585 Person, Woman, Man, Camera, T.V.- could you repeat that? 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
586 The good news is you're off probation. The bad news is . . . 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
587 Dr Faukly I understand this position was offered as part of the placebo settlement 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
588 We'll be conducting experiments with mice today. I hope you won't be offended. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
589 We'll be together again soon, darling! I'm going to try the formula on myself. 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
590 We'll definitely go with guinea pigs for next stage of the reaserch" 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
591 But are you still afraid of cats? 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
592 About last night— 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
593 I’m sorry, you know that if you were Mickey I would. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
594 Let’s hope our next experiment is as successful as last one. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
595 No. I don’t see a conflict of interest. 1.4167 0.14865 12 7 5 0
596 Do you ever get the funny feeling we’re being watched? 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
597 Even Mighty Mouse is shifting careers during COVID 1.4167 0.22891 12 9 1 2
598 Sorry, your cousin didn't survive the test. 1.4118 0.14997 17 11 5 1
599 What you’re about to see might upset you, Claire. 1.4118 0.14997 17 11 5 1
600 I guess my request for lab mice WAS somewhat ambiguous. 1.4118 0.14997 17 11 5 1
601 So, this cheeseball project, how'd that get started? 1.4118 0.14997 17 11 5 1
602 Dr. Fauci? Is that you? 1.4118 0.17276 17 12 3 2
603 First, I want to say I’m glad we’ve put all that unpleasantness behind us... 1.4118 0.12304 17 10 7 0
604 Well, the good news is you are now COVID-free and you no longer have to worry about expression wrinkles 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
605 I'm sure you'll find this to be a mazing work environment. 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
606 Your uncle was just in here yesterday. He asked about our comprehensive health plan albeit short term. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
607 Doctor, you seem off... did you get a haircut? 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
608 The experimental hallucinogen has kicked in. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
609 The good news is your blood work is fine. The bad news is that it's not reversible. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
610 It’s very brave of you to try the vaccine on yourself, doctor... 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
611 I’m not sure I am comfortable running the maze. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
612 The upside is that the vaccine works... 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
613 Would you like to grab a fondue after work sometime? 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
614 I'm so glad we started promoting from within 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
615 If you want to write up our findings I'l give you a piece of cheese. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
616 I admire your expertise. 1.4000 0.40000 5 4 0 1
617 No, sorry, I need a guinea pig. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
618 Did you try it on yourself? 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
619 So now, the samples you see before you, are your parents." 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
620 Did you know that in our lab we have switched from rats to lawyers 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
621 Hmm...Lab cats?? Interesting thought doctor. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
622 Some of my best friends are mice. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
623 Not bad. It only took you four times to make it from the parking lot to the lab. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
624 Well, it's very nice that after participating in so many tests you're now one of us. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
625 You're completely revolutionizing our research here at Velveeta." 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
626 The hallways in this building can be a little confusing but I’m sure you can figure them out. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
627 Thank you for agreeing to do our sensitivity training session today. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
628 I'm sorry, I don't date coworkers. Or giant mice in lab coats and pince-nez. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
629 It's true. Our study confirmed that the life expectancy of a lab rat is...one semester. 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
630 I meant to say this experiment was Donald Duck, Sir. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
631 Recent data suggests over-identification with the test subjects. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
632 No sir, absolutely no animal testing. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
633 The good new is we got the funding for the study using humans. The bad news is that you can't dissect them at the end. 1.4000 0.40000 5 4 0 1
634 I found your paper on "Finding the Cheese" amazing. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
635 Do all six thousand of your brothers and sisters look like you? 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
636 So tell me about your brother who went into movies. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
637 Um, yes, I guess we could have humans run through the maze for this study. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
638 Of course our research is unbiased. Why do you ask? 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
639 We thawed Walt. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
640 It’s just that you’re a little over-dressed for the maze. 1.4000 0.40000 5 4 0 1
641 I think you know what happened last time we rushed 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
642 Of course, sir, I am against experimenting with guinea pigs. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
643 Someone has pilfered our results. I smell a rat in the lab. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
644 Yes, I know your Uncle Mickey quite well. We were suite mates once. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
645 Do you have any ethical qualms about this study? 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
646 I can't believe it's taken this long for members of the rodent community to assume positions of responsibility in the lab. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
647 Thanks for volunteering but all we have is small sized cages. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
648 I hear you're highly respected in your fields. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
649 You're wanted in the testing lab. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
650 Don't you think you have a conflict of interest? 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
651 Yes, I heard there's great upward mobility in this lab. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
652 Yes, I suppose the results would be just as valid if we tested it on cats. 1.4000 0.19024 15 11 2 2
653 Excuse me doctor, but you might want to consider recusing yourself from the next testing phase. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
654 That species diversity training yesterday was an eye opener. I never realized what a maze you had to negotiate to get here. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
655 What's up Pussycat? 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
656 Did you notice any unusual effect from the vaccine? 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
657 My research leads me to a complex descriptive solution. Dr. Earhart, what do your instincts conclude? 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
658 Didn’t you use to work here? 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
659 Hey! It looks like you weren’t in the placebo group. 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
660 I’m concerned that you’re becoming too attached to the test subjects. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
661 Doctor, I think patients’ negative reaction to you may be something more than ‘white coat syndrome.’ 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
662 I'm sorry but my thesis was about doing research on mice NOT working with mice! 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
663 We need to go over this purchase order for "cats, lots of cats." 1.4000 0.13093 15 9 6 0
664 Frankly, on you I like the side effects. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
665 We may have to pause phase three. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
666 Doctor, apparently you did not get the placebo. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
667 -but do you have thumbs? 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
668 Your findings continue to gnaw at me. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
669 Forgive me, Dr. Katz. You look different than I was expecting. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
670 What, you've never seen a female scientist? 1.4000 0.40000 5 4 0 1
671 Excuse me Dr. E. Ars? Can you point me to the Maze room. I seem to be lost! 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
672 And you will be in charge of human trials. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
673 You're a bit overqualified for this experiment. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
674 The lab...er, rats...are ready when you are, Sir. 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
675 Nice of you to volunteer for the vaccine trial. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
676 You do realize you were in the control group... 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
677 If we are doing role reversals, I guess I should go get in a cage. 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
678 Try me 1.4000 0.40000 5 4 0 1
679 The president was so impressed with your results in the maze that he’d like you to serve as an advisor on the Coronavirus Task Force. Congratulations! 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
680 It ended well for you, no? 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
681 Have you heard the news lately?” @newyorkerma 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
682 I’d like to apologize for the incident last week. All our janitorial staff have now been informed to avoid the term “squeaky clean”. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
683 So, are you ready to find out who moved your cheese? 1.4000 0.16330 15 10 4 1
684 Oh... Bob. I see you’ve completed the Exponential Growth Experiment.” 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
685 Where are my kids, Sandra? 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
686 ‘It’s about your Mom’ 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
687 From the test results yes, humans still think they own the planet 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
688 So we will be injecting humans this time if that is okay?” 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
689 Noticed any side effects ? 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
690 Your study is conclusive, Mr. Squeakers. There is definitely more than one way to skin a cat. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
691 Legally, it means they can say it’s tested by, not on animals. It’s a marketing thing. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
692 The economy is open; your swab results are in. Good news: you’re back on the rat race. Bad news: you’re back on the rat race. 1.4000 0.40000 5 4 0 1
693 Sir, I don’t want to be rude but I think there is a side effect with that experiment. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
694 You know, I’ve always mentioned how I thought we should have used different test subjects... 1.4000 0.22111 10 7 2 1
695 Excuse me, no Women allowed in here 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
696 Yes Ma’am. Tested it myself. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
697 Sir, not sure if you’ve notice, but it does look like the new vaccine does come with a minor side effect. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
698 We should’ve cross bred lab rats and scientists a long time ago! Way more efficient. 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
699 I’m putting my foot down. NO cat scans! 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
700 We welcome the unique perspective you bring to our testing process 1.4000 0.16330 10 6 4 0
701 "I can assure that our lab is entirely rodent free." 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
702 I can confirm, that batch is LSD. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
703 It's an honor to work with the most successful product of our program. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
704 ''I was bitten by a radioactive mouse.'' 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
705 Oh, Mr. Sulu - not another transporter malfunction! 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
706 Welcome back 24601, honestly, we never thought our experimental injections would produce such remarkable results. After you settle in, I'll take you to your lab where we'll start the Human Trials. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
707 I've asked around. We don't know who moved your cheese. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
708 It seems we're out cheese for the lab rats again. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
709 And then he just started spanking his pecker like it was going out of style. Camera on, mic on, everything. Just ferociously stroking his cock. The cock? Nothing special, bigger than my mouse dick though. Anyways, we still on for drinks after this? 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
710 Any trouble finding us? 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
711 So if you pee in a cup, is that a murine sample? 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
712 Sir, I need to check one piece of data. Would you mind getting into the maze again? 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
713 We provide a maze-free environment. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
714 Welcome to our lab Harold. It's so mice to neet you! 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
715 Sorry I am late. This office building is like a maze. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
716 Tests indicate it's safe for humans. Now we can start testing on mice. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
717 I've always thought of myself as a lab rat too! 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
718 It’s gratifying to see the career development program finally paying off. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
719 Yes, I have noticed some changes since you tested our new drug on yourself. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
720 I am sorry but I don't date members of the control group. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
721 Actually, there is something I need to tell you about your human- mouse hybrid DNA project... 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
722 Unfortunately, all the ... little critters died. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
723 The Gorgonzola did cure Covid-19. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
724 The job doesn't change you so much as it reveals who you are.. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
725 Well, it's very kind of you to ask, but when I was a young girl I kind of made a promise to myself to never date a half-man, half-rodent" 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
726 It’s a total rat race out there, but I don’t have to tell you that. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
727 ‘The humans are ready for testing’ 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
728 It will be different testing this on myself for a change. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
729 I was appointed by President Trump. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
730 Thank you for this opportunity. Sorry about your friends. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
731 And as for the experiments we’ve done so far...don’t worry, it’s nobody you knew. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
732 Yeah...so you’re not going to like the next stage of testing. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
733 Don't you ever wonder why cheese makes you salivate? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
734 Someday I'd really like to pick your brain. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
735 Now for some actual guinea pig DNA. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
736 We've perfected the growth serum, haven't we Dr. Little? 1.3750 0.15478 16 11 4 1
737 The first day can be pretty rough. It’s easy to get lost in this maze. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
738 Thanks for your report. Before you go back to your office, how about a little snack I prepared - uh - just for you? 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
739 Yes it is a bit of a maze around here. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
740 Have you noticed any side effects? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
741 Why yes, I believe I did conduct research on your siblings! 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
742 So we'll test it in humans, and if it's safe, we can give it to rats? 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
743 I'm a bit of a lab rat,myself. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
744 I love participatory research. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
745 I think our best bet is to again apply for the Disney Foundation grant. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
746 Dr. Fauci, love the mask! Definitely Militia-proof. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
747 Sir, your experiments have truly been transformative! 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
748 Yes Smith. You were right. Drinking mouse urine does have an effec! 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
749 Yes, you got the Nobel Prize but.... 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
750 Sorry — I never date someone I'm about to dissect. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
751 Alright, you made it through the first maze. Now let’s see how you navigate sexual harassment in the work place. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
752 According to my records, you were in the control group. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
753 And to think, you started here by running around in that little maze. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
754 I HOPE THAT THERE WILL BE NO MORE ACCIDENTAL SWALLOWINGS OF EXPERIMENTAL POTIONS, MR. HYDE-RATT. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
755 And I want to thank your entire family. We couldn’t have done it without their sacrifices. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
756 How goes the reverse trial ? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
757 Myxomatosis is certainly a problem but the contract definitely says Covid-19. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
758 We are so happy to have someone with your experience. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
759 Or we could use Guinea pigs. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
760 Part of me feels like I’ve built a better, uhm, you know, trap. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
761 Drink these, and you'll either return to a human, or grow six hairy testicles on your back. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
762 I have concocted a potion that will cause a person to become promiscuous when introduced to a drink. With your permission, I'd like to call it a Micky 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
763 Gee Mr. Pence, did you grow those ears so you can hear the science for a change? 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
764 Well, as they say, you've built a better mouse trap. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
765 You have come a long way since we did the Pavlov test on you 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
766 When you are done for the day, exit through the maze that begins at the door behind you. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
767 The good news is not all your rats have abandoned ship.The bad news is you let too many rats drown and your ship is sinking. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
768 It turned out to be a bit more earie than we thought. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
769 Yes, we can name this procedure after you cousin Mickey. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
770 Michael? Mice to meet you! Sorry-- too cheesy? 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
771 Professor, I'm sorry your experiment wasn't a complete success, but that's no reason to squeak at me. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
772 How do you feel about more animal tests? 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
773 It's helpful to have someone who knows their way around a lab 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
774 It works in people, but we're trying to find out if the effect is the same in mice. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
775 It's an honor to work with a graduate of the program. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
776 No. No. Nothing's wrong. It's just that... I wasn't expecting you to become our Director. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
777 So to be clear, in this parallel universe, i am actually the same size as a lab "rat", i mean lab "scientist"? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
778 But I don't want to be a mouse 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
779 Thanks for coming in Jason. Remember those placebos we gave you? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
780 We appreciate your visit from the lab, but we need IDENTIFICATION, not RODENTIFICATION 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
781 Well it might be difficult to utilize cheese in all our experiments. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
782 It's always so inspiring when a patient becomes a doctor. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
783 Yes, Jerry, I'm sorry about Tom's remark. "Building a better mousetrap" is culturally insensitive. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
784 I apologize for the family members you lost because we tested stuff that was just too f(*&ing obvious. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
785 Nice touch with the tie and the glasses, but I see through your pink little lies 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
786 So how much will you pay me to be an experimental subject? 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
787 You are the result of a cross species lab experiment. Now go back to your cage please. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
788 Happy to report I've successfully either shrunk myself or grown you 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
789 It was your dedication to navigate past the dead ends, twists, and turns it made this discovery possible. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
790 I'm sorry. The guidelines for the participation of rodents in laboratory experiments have fairly strict parameters. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
791 It’s such a pleasure to work with a former test subject. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
792 I think you'll like "The Fly". 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
793 It's cheaper than experimenting with cheese and cocaine. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
794 Yes, and per management's settlement proposal, all future lab testing will be on the company lawyers. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
795 And people call me a lab rat! 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
796 Hmmm! I see you are not on the placebo! 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
797 First one through the maze buys lunch 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
798 Did you hear about Sills? 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
799 Of course we need to test it on humans first so we know it's safe to give to mice. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
800 The bad news is that you didn't get the placebo Doctor. The good news is that Walmart has a special on cheese. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
801 Have you been eating the lab chow again? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
802 I take it you plan be in charge of selecting test subjects? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
803 Doctor,your vaccine is ready. Which arm will it be this time? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
804 There seems to be a funny side effect to the new vaccine. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
805 I'm afraid you have outgrown your usefulness. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
806 So; what your answer? I’m all ears! 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
807 Now let's find out if the antidote works as well 1.3750 0.17970 16 12 2 2
808 So,you'd like to be a lab rat? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
809 Make sure every subject receives the placebo. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
810 I can't help but notice you've taken lab work home, Dr. Wilson. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
811 Yes, but; you can’t let your personal history shade the science 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
812 You've come a long way since you ran the maze for us! 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
813 Well, Dr. Fauci, you obviously did not get the placebo. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
814 Sir, we think it's cheddar - but it could be a trap. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
815 Did I come from one of those? 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
816 Laboratory, not labyrinth. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
817 I think you may have misunderstood my request for a lab mouse. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
818 I never moved your cheese. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
819 Rats! I've forgotten which one has the placebo. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
820 The formula worked, professor. I now look and feel like a real woman. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
821 You weren't supposed to eat the lab ratatouille. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
822 I just don't understand why we're testing it on cats. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
823 I assume the cat's away. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
824 You're not the kind of lab rat we usually get 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
825 I'm sorry, Doctor, but it's a slippery slope. 'If you give a mouse a lab key, he's going to ask for a flask of colloidal calcium phosphate.' 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
826 I heard about your promotion. No hard feelings right? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
827 I'm so excited, sir, that you have joined the group. You will provide a new level of expertise to our research. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
828 You're telling me that you have 754 Mice-Human babies in those test tubes??? What were you thinking??? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
829 Did I hear you say, "This how you got your start?' 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
830 Your escape from the maze is legendary. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
831 I understand your point but we can’t allow you to experiment on human subjects. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
832 I'm sorry Mike. It's in your job description. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
833 Just to be clear, I never liked the term ‘lab rats.’ 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
834 I tested all the samples, professor, and I'll say, I can hardly feel my tail anymore! 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
835 Okay, but I refuse to list the fruit flies as co-authors. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
836 I love your chutzpah. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
837 The side-effects are manageable, Doctor, but sometimes I miss my tail. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
838 It's so good to have an interpreter! 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
839 It seems "erections lasting longer than 4 hours" wasn't the worst side-effect 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
840 Wow, you give new meaning to the term "lab rat." 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
841 The cat wanted to play but said you were missing.. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
842 It's so nice to work with someone with a lot of lab experience. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
843 I started out washing test tubes. You? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
844 It really will be a better mousetrap, really. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
845 Yes, I know it's unusual to see a woman in this field. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
846 No need to worry. Your kids came through the testing just fine. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
847 And I thought 2020 couldn't get any weirder. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
848 They're all placebos - we don't want the people to panic. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
849 Didn't you agree not to test the drug only on the mice! 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
850 With what we learn from our experiments, we're confident that we'll be able to build a better . . . you know. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
851 Okay, one little side effect, but has the coughing stopped? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
852 Well, they did offer me a job in testing, but really, have you seen those guys? They’re such a bunch of lab ra.., oh, sorry... 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
853 Sorry Tom, I think I gave you the wrong vial. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
854 No, you're right, we'll start with the human trials 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
855 When you return to your office, Doctor, please be sure to keep an eye out for the cat. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
856 Eek! A consultant! 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
857 Ok, now that we know it works on humans, we can test on the mice. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
858 Good news...Vaccine compliance amongst lab mice is nearly 100% 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
859 and the student becomes the master 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
860 I’m glad you haven’t noticed any side effects. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
861 Don't worry. Our products have been tested on humans. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
862 The lab humans are saying they never signed the consent form. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
863 By the way, congratulations on the promotion. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
864 You find us ok? The parking lot's a maze. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
865 I like your tie Stewart. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
866 I thought I did well in the maze. What did you think? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
867 Bob, some of the transformation serum ended up in your coffee.” 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
868 Finally– cheesium. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
869 I feel like there’s real chemistry between us, Algernon. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
870 Why are you looking at me? You're the human. Go test it on you. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
871 I thought you said I’d be getting the injections tomorrow, sir...today I’m leaving right at 5 to get my lip waxed 1.3750 0.12500 16 10 6 0
872 Hello Dr Mousey, the humans would like to know how far the vaccine is from being available? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
873 Day 3 of the experiment: Anna the lab human is starting to believe she is a scientist. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
874 I was told there was going to be three of you for the blind test. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
875 The gorgonzola sample yielded the highest flavor output-just as you hypothesized. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
876 I've come up with a novel methodology: I call it a 'maze.' 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
877 I’ll ask again. You’re SURE you didn’t test this on yourself? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
878 Your credentials are sound, but I fear you’ll face ethical dilemmas the moment you start working here. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
879 The results are back and it’s worse than we thought. Velveeta cheese is NOT real cheese. You have my thoughts and prayers. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
880 You’re not you when you’re hungry” 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
881 I see you’ve worked your tail off 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
882 I'm sorry, doctor. We couldn't save your family. But we got some incredible data! 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
883 First in the family to make it to the end of the maze... all to work in a lab with no windows 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
884 I have more experience with maze experiments, but I’ll figure it out. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
885 Sheila felt uneasy now that the lab rat had been promoted to her boss 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
886 Sorry sir, I realize lab rat isn’t the proper nomenclature. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
887 No cosplay in the office. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
888 You were right. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
889 Its an honour to be a part of your team, Dr. Mouse. When they asked, "Will you be comfortable with animal testing?", this isn't exactly what I had in mind. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
890 How was I to know there was a mouse in there. I was looking for flys. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
891 I really appreciate you cutting a hole in the back of these pants 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
892 You were in the first round of trials? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
893 Do you identify yourself as a mouse or a rat? 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
894 So COVID 19 treatment testing seems to be going well... 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
895 My jacket is ill-fitting 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
896 You’re awfully eager to start the cat trials 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
897 I’m so sorry Algernon, I had no idea that they were your cousins. They didn’t suffer though. 1.3750 0.26305 8 6 1 1
898 Lab Rats Matter, Karen. 1.3750 0.17970 16 12 2 2
899 The mouse transformation is a manageable side effect. Let the president know the vaccine will be ready by the election 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
900 Well well well, if it isn't the rodent who's fucking my wife 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
901 And this is our mickeyscope, ahem, sorry, I meant microscope. 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
902 Run me through this test again. 1.3750 0.15478 16 11 4 1
903 @mar_ly_rose “Oh hey Greg, hows the behavioral research diagnostic on the speed of SARS-CoV-2 among Homo sapiens going?”, “Well Linda, it’s going great for the mice!” 1.3750 0.18298 8 5 3 0
904 Did I say dissection? I meant dissertation, we’d love to look at your dissertation. 1.3750 0.12500 16 10 6 0
905 Don’t blame me! You’re the one who had to try one more mouse experiment. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
906 We admire your enthusiasm, but we just need you as the subject again. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
907 Our maze research staff has been redirected to the White House’s experimental COVID-19 testing program. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
908 Guinea pigs is what I said... 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
909 Great news! We can reverse the side effects of your COVID vaccine inoculation! 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
910 I assure you, all the testing in this lab will be done on humans. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
911 Do we have some cheese? 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
912 I actually used to work with your father. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
913 It's our latest fragrance, "Fromage du Maize" . Vos pensées? 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
914 It's great to have you back. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
915 The results showed the vaccine worked on rats but us humans are no longer in the rat race 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
916 I told you not to take it until Fauci approved it. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
917 We are thrilled to be working with such an esteemed lab rat as yourself. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
918 Jeffrey Toobin, I know it's you. Take off the mask please. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
919 I'm such a fan of your early work in psychology and learning theory. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
920 ...and let me say it is an honor to work with you, and that in no way, shape or form did I mean anything personal about that 'lab-rat' crack... 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
921 Well based on human testing the makeup should be safe for rats. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
922 It’s really great to see that you got out of the maze. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
923 To be honest, we hired you because you solving the mazes faster than any of our researchers could. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
924 Now reduce that dose just a smidge. But in the meantime, happy Halloween! 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
925 Let me just say it has alway been a dream of mine to work with a lab mouse at this level. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
926 You definitely did not get the placebo. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
927 Now let's try the one that will make me small and naked. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
928 Good news: the CAT scan came back negative. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
929 Well, as a species, we're going extinct, but, Best of Luck on YOUR evolution! 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
930 Did you forget this was dress-down Friday? 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
931 Rest assured that all of our products have been tested on animals. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
932 Just be careful on bring your family to work day. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
933 So, Formula 'A', nothing. Formula 'B' , man- mouse. Do you concur? 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
934 It's an honor to be working at the Hanna-Barbera lab. I understand Tom is on the second floor. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
935 Is this your gig while Disneyland is closed? 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
936 Are you on the peer review committee? 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
937 Ok Dr. Little, I’m ready for that maze... 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
938 Why, Ratsy, we expected you to be pleased that our rat-to-human gene transversion was successful! 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
939 So, no discernible side effects then ? 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
940 Perhaps you misunderstood my email Dr. Rat, you are the subject of the study. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
941 All cheese samples have the virus. I told you to wear your mask! 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
942 I am excited! I'm just eager for the vaccine to immunize humans. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
943 I appreciate this interview, you see, I am writing a sequel to John Steinbeck, called “ Of Mice and Women”, 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
944 When they said "Dr. Skinner is the pre-eminent rat scientist" , I though it was just a figure of speech. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
945 Agreed. I think we've learned enough to stop the trial. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
946 The Disney layoffs cause typecasting issues for lab openings. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
947 I know we promised to change you back, but our grant money just fell through. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
948 Dr. Ratz, I really don't understand this." 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
949 Do you believe in science or do you think the world is made of cheese? 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
950 Wow Carl, when they asked EVERYONE in the lab to work on a vaccine I guess they meant it” 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
951 ...unfortunately, the vaccine side effects includes a sudden loss of appetite for cheese... 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
952 Are you sure this Covid Vaccine batch had no side effects Doctor? 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
953 I know just what role you're going to play in my experiment. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
954 You've come a long way since getting out of that maze 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
955 You really don't know what happened to the vial containing mutant mouse DNA? 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
956 My husband is a gym rat. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
957 Well, yes, the ad did say we were looking for research mice, but... 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
958 No offense, but I'm going to pass on the teleportation project team. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
959 . . . and we are looking for volunteer mice to test the vaccine on. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
960 No, I will not join you for a spot of cheese after work, and, for the last time, my name is not "Minnie"! 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
961 Who moved my cheese? 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
962 We expected changes when Disney went into pharmaceuticals. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
963 Thank you for helping us test our new cheese Professor. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
964 You’ll be pleased to know I failed to create a better mousetrap. But I did discover a way to make cheese cheesier. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
965 You see, Dr. Williston, I’m having imposter syndrome. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
966 We did get one complaint from the feline subject's rights committee. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
967 Ok, we are all set. We only need the mi-, I mean, pigs! 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
968 Uh, happy Halloween to you, too, George. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
969 Do you make mouse calls? 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
970 Your new drug application was disapproved. It seems one pill makes you larger but the next pill makes you small. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
971 I volunteered because I'm trying to be fair and inclusive. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
972 Well, Professor Algernon, I have good news and bad news. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
973 Your parents aren't in the database,but the good news is one of them definitely has 20 pairs of chromosomes. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
974 Experiment subjects? Um, well... 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
975 We are the first vegan friendly certified laboratory, all testing is with animals, not on animals 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
976 I got my start in the mailroom, too. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
977 So I guess we’re lab partners! 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
978 So how comfortable are you with animal testing? 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
979 Your results have finally confirmed who cut the cheese. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
980 Beauty and The Beast: Research Lab version 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
981 I was trapped in the back office for years... Stick at it, you’ll make Professor one day! 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
982 And now we wait to see if there are any side effects. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
983 ...and then after med school, I needed 3 jobs just to keep up with the student loans. I wish this internship paid. Sometimes it feels like I'm just running around in a big maze! 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
984 We need better representation in the sciences. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
985 Congratulations, you’re being promoted again. 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
986 If you need to find the breakroom, let me know. This place can be a bit of a maze. 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
987 Well, if you're the lab rat, that would make me the lab brat! 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
988 The control group is scurrying in the alley.” 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
989 As you know, Dr. Algernon, the Lab cannot be responsible for the results when researchers use themselves as experimental subjects... 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
990 Yes, I suppose I'm ready for the maze again. 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
991 You realize, don't you, that 'lab rats' is just something everyone said in those days? 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
992 Can’t wait to start my research on metamorphosis 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
993 ...... and I'm not into body shaming. 1.3571 0.19910 14 11 1 2
994 Your lab work is amazing. 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
995 I have some sad news about your colleagues.... 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
996 We are ready for the lab rats, Mr, Whiskers. 1.3571 0.19910 14 11 1 2
997 Sorry sir, but we can find no way to shrink your ears! 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
998 The cheese? That down the hall to the right, then a left, another right and two more lefts. 1.3571 0.19910 14 11 1 2
999 I've completed the maze-like job application process; can I be rewarded with a job now? 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
1000 We were warned about possible side effects, including abnormal ear growth. 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1001 Develop a mousetrap vaccine, and the world won't beat a path to your door. 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1002 The maze was simple enough but i still couldn’t tell the difference between gorgonzola ,blue cheese and roquefort 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
1003 Systemic? I say "ALL lives matter!" 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
1004 Thanks to your little accident, we can perform animal and human testing at the same time! 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1005 It's just amazing that you're raising four mutant turtles on a professor's salary. 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
1006 I'm sorry Doctor, but I don't understand why a cat scan is necessary. 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
1007 The supply department wants to know if you’ll be participating in Take Our Kids to Work Day. 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1008 I understand you've worked your way up from the testing lab. 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1009 In which field do you work? 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
1010 Professor, the new appaRATus gives aMAZEing results! 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1011 Are we going to discuss the elephant in the room, Steven? 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1012 Honestly not the weirdest dream I’ve had this week. 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1013 Cheese and crackers you surprised me doctor! 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1014 Well, there’s no RIGHT way to hold a clipboard but, if you want to fit in....... 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1015 It’s your turn today. 1.3571 0.13289 14 9 5 0
1016 I think we need to do more testing. 1.3529 0.14706 17 12 4 1
1017 Sorry I'm late, this place is a maze. 1.3529 0.14706 17 12 4 1
1018 Well, in conclusion, this experiment didn't go as planned 1.3529 0.14706 17 12 4 1
1019 It does sound like 'Faux Cheese'. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1020 Guess what, Karen... you’re going to Disneyland. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1021 Welcome to the Woke University Reparations Lab. You will of course be experimenting on human beings. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1022 I'm sorry if I seem distracted. It's just that your resemblance to Dr. Fauci is unnerving sometimes. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1023 If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, eh? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1024 Well Stuart, I can’t say that having you join our team is the strangest thing that’s happened this year. 1.3333 0.33333 6 5 0 1
1025 It's strange...recently I've started scampering a lot. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1026 Yeah, pretty good thanks. Yourself? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1027 And to think--I was impressed when you made it through the maze. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1028 Aren't you glad your testing days are over? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1029 Combining technical and expert-by-experience knowledge 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1030 The gene editing experiment on you was successful, but the technician was dyslexic. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1031 Am I smelling a rat here? 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1032 It’s such an honor to work with you Dr. Labrat. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1033 I’ve been following your research lab ever since it was a hole in the wall. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1034 Any suggestions for dating a rat? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1035 I still remember when you were the smartest one in our lab maze. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1036 I still think it's a little cheesey 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1037 Eureka , we discovered a better human trap 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1038 But I told you to build a better device for catching rodents. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1039 Thank you again, Doctor, for this chance to earn my ears. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1040 Is it disrespectful to call you a lab rat? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1041 Wow, just look at you! It seems like just the other day I could fit you and all your brothers and sisters in the palm of one hand. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1042 So you think they'll normalize women in science soon? 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1043 You know my remark about the inmates taking over the asylum was just a joke, right? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1044 We ready to try for super IQ dogs. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1045 I guess the Steinbeck Serum was a 50/50 chance of mice or men. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1046 It is true that they say 'dress for the job you want, not the one you have'... 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1047 Ha, ha, very funny. Now, take off those clothes and drink the test tubes. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1048 I'm ordering lunch. Cheese sandwich again? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1049 Doctor, if you're not wearing a Halloween mask, we really messed up our mouse DNA study. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1050 This lab really is a maze. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1051 The synthetic shrooms are breaking good. 1.3333 0.12599 15 10 5 0
1052 Oh, they didn't explain to you it was part of your duties to try all the formulations? 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1053 remind me again if you are cruelty-free? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1054 I hope that your family commitments won't hinder our research. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1055 It must be fulfilling coming back to the lab where you got your start. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1056 Doctor my cat has disappeared." 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1057 Before we can move on,would it upset protocol if you assisted Dr. Nelson out of the maze? 1.3333 0.15936 15 11 3 1
1058 No good hypothesis yet; I feel like I'm running on a hamster wheel with this experiment. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1059 Turns out we can make low-sodium cheese 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1060 Do I experiment on mice- why do you ask? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1061 If this experiment goes as planned, I'll give you some cheese. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1062 Okay, so at least we know that one isn’t the placebo. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1063 I see the shrink-ray worked. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1064 It's so inspiring to see a graduate giving back like this. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1065 Good morning Dr. Murine, I'm Ms. Badger with HR and I'm here to discuss concerns raised by your coworkers about side effects that might be related to your animal studies. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1066 And Dr. Mauci we just need three million volunteers! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1067 I’m sorry! I only meant ‘lab rat’ in the figurative sense. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1068 While your brother Mickey is the celebrity, I'm a bigger fan of your work, professor. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1069 I don't know how to put this to you, but YOU were the experiment. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1070 You said,no sideeffects.. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1071 Look, as a woman in science I also had to go through a maze to get here and all I'm saying is that as a straight white mouse you're still vastly overrepresented in the research. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1072 It says we're pregnant! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1073 'We can help you. We know how the black death was spread.' 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1074 Ok, fair enough. How about cats? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1075 I didn't mean to offend you when I asked if your family would be able to help with testing. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1076 Welcome to the team and may I say we are all curious to learn more about your theories on bypassing laboratory tests in favor of going straight to human trials. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1077 Now that I know not to move your cheese, I'm confident the test results will improve. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1078 And one last thing, I'm going to need you to sign this nepotism waiver. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1079 Welp, back to the rat race. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1080 Wow! You really took your role as lab rat seriously! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1081 If you try to slip me a Mickey, I'll have to report you for sexual harassment. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1082 No need for more testing, you're proof our union's inflatable rat work. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1083 Well...in a way, it did cure baldness. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1084 Can I assume that no one informed you of the side effects? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1085 The test results are back. You are a rat. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1086 Congratulations on your new formula for brie 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1087 Yes, I survived the initial trials, so now I'm being tested to see if my kind can do any of the work of mice. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1088 Hi,I’m from OSHA. There have been some worker complaints... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1089 Absolutely not ! We limit testing to White Men. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1090 I believe you already recognize the amazing results of our lab. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1091 I started in this lab from below, young lady! 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1092 Yes- they told me that I would be working with lab rats, but I guess I misunderstood.. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1093 If we move really fast and skip a few details, we can have this on the market before election day. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1094 If you’d like to go back to being a regular mouse, you can volunteer for the next experiment. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1095 One of the tiny humans has escaped! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1096 But was it the desired outcome? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1097 Well, there's the pot calling the kettle black! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1098 I really had a good time last night. I hope it wasn't a problem when I switched our glasses of wine 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1099 We thought this time we should go straight to human trials 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1100 Thanks! You look mousy too. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1101 No, thank you, but I'd rather not participate in your research study. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1102 Dr. Faucci, is that you? Forgive me, I forgot my contact lenses 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1103 Of mice and woman 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1104 Well,now let's see if the antidote works 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1105 I'm a little uncomfortable talking about my last assignment, working with the lab rats. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1106 You say you've tried this vaccine already? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1107 ...thus proving my hypothesis that it is actually the scientists who are being studied and this is all a simulation. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1108 I don't think we'll be releasing the results of this study. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1109 I'll call you Mickey, but only because the experiment worked. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1110 Relax, Bob, your nephews got the placebo. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1111 Honestly Dr. I appreciate your zeal for speeding up the Vaccine's approval... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1112 As I think I mentioned before the test, there could be some side effects. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1113 Oh rats! You're here! I guess our new poison didn't work. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1114 Do I get my treat now, Dr. Karstens? I finished the maze. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1115 Dr., we are hoping to find a cure for role reversal. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1116 All we need to validate our hypothesis is a politically-correct lab animal. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1117 I told you I was better at reverse engineering than engineering! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1118 You’ll be happy to know that security has removed all the cats from the premises! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1119 Good News! The mouse-lineage antibody cocktail works against the virus. But, there is a side effect. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1120 Ok, I get it, testing on animals is a no go. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1121 Sorry, when they said I'd be working with mice I assumed I'd be experimenting on them. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1122 It seems to have worked on humans so we can begin testing mice. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1123 We’re an equal opportunity employer. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1124 We are sure to benefit from your insight into the spread of diseases. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1125 You are an excellent role model. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1126 Well, most mice grow up poor. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1127 As they say, ‘dress for the job you want’ 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1128 So, your suggestion of testing first on humans is highly unusual. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1129 Well the good news is that the vaccine worked and you have Covid immunity! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1130 Is it true that one of the side effects is cravings for cheese? 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1131 Welcome to the team. HR tells me you are from New York! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1132 What do you mean by you want to experiment on me? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1133 I don't care if you are a mouse. It's totally inappropriate for me to 'right click' you. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1134 Professor, are you sure that the government will fund finding a cure for rat poison? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1135 Your Ancestry DNA report suggest you’re 25% rat, 70 % human and 5% Disney 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1136 This must be exciting for you. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1137 I'm glad the medical ethics board has agreed to diversify. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1138 The Super Grow was for plants, not animals! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1139 Scientifically speaking, you're repulsive. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1140 Well, the tests came back. And it turns out I am hallucinating. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1141 I got my start hunting for cheese in a science fair maze. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1142 You've been here for how long??!!! 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1143 And, finally, the cheese in the fridge is mine. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1144 Remy how many times do I need to tell you that you are a test subject not a lab tech. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1145 Sorry, but we couldn’t get enough really small people to volunteer for the experiment. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1146 Nice to meet you,Dr. ... uh ...Mouse is your name? Hello ... you can just call me Dr. REVENGE!! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1147 Sorry, professor, but when I was assigned to work with intelligent rodents, this isn't what I expected 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1148 Are you familiar with the Stockholm Syndrome? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1149 Sorry, we haven't found a cure for your accident, but the good news is, we've ordered pizza for lunch with extra cheese. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1150 The results of your particular intelligence test have been quite remarkable. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1151 I never date anyone from work but with you I'll make an exception. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1152 Its so mouse to meet you! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1153 Big change from Anaheim Ca.! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1154 I might have forgotten to mention that sometimes my cat likes to hang around the lab. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1155 I know, I know but my dad heard marine biologist. Just make up stuff about dolphins and they’ll love you. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1156 Are the results in Miss Funicello? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1157 Well look who’s growing! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1158 We’re all so thrilled, Mickey, that you’ve moved on from the maze and have joined the rat race. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1159 Want to try it on the humans? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1160 As an intern, it’s very encouraging for me to hear your story of advancement in this lab. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1161 Shoot. I'm all ears 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1162 As someone who has worked their way up through the ranks, what advice would you give someone just starting out 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1163 Thanks to your leadership on the behavioral science project, we are ahead of schedule. 1.3333 0.12599 15 10 5 0
1164 Which would you prefer? The antidote or some cheese? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1165 I am here to audit your bioethics compliance. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1166 Any other side effects? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1167 Now be sure to discontinue use if you experience depression or any thoughts of jumping into a cheese trap. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1168 You wouldn’t believe the data unless you completed the trial yourself. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1169 Actually, I was hoping to CONDUCT an experiment. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1170 I see you actively process information rather than operating on a stimulus response relationship. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1171 And when I woke up this morning, everything was normal again. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1172 Of course we would. It’s just that there aren’t any humans small enough. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1173 Yes we’re ready to begin testing the COVID vaccine on humans. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1174 So are you ready for the maze part of the experiment now? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1175 Your labo-rat-ory test results are here sir. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1176 I'm sorry about your cousin Harry! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1177 Should we tell the President? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1178 Still no new antibiotics since neomycin I'm afraid 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1179 We’re getting great results from the double blind mice studies. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1180 Now all we have to do is find someway to test this to make sure it’s safe - any ideas? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1181 Great news . . . a tortoise won the marathon! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1182 Before we begin, do you have any cheese allergies? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1183 Dr. Richards, you always were a mouse. 1.3333 0.12599 15 10 5 0
1184 Disney called again. Offered to fund your research if you’ll to return to the entertainment business. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1185 Good news! You weren't in the placebo group. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1186 No doctor, I've never experimented on cats before. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1187 Ummm, you might not like this next experiment. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1188 On a personal note, I know your family made a lot of sacrifices to get you here. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1189 So you’re the big cheese around here? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1190 Of course I support a diverse workplace. We just can't leave crumbs out on the floor here. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1191 It looks like the lab cats are responding well to the Camembert. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1192 Would it be wrong to ask if you're related to Subject A? He really does have your ears. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1193 I'm sorry, Ma'm. Your species Is just very vulnerable to covid. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1194 My goal is to be just like you. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1195 You're the first to arrive, doctor. You say the others are lost in the halls? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1196 We've upgraded you from "hole in the wainscoting" to a cubicle. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1197 We feel your life experiences are the perfect answer to the negative media image of animal testing. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1198 Welcome aboard! You’ll find your office at the end of the maze. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1199 Rusty, I kwow it's you, now where is the doctor? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1200 Although I can’t seem to reverse the process, some WD-40 may help with the squeaking. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1201 Since we tried the last one on you, I guess it's my turn now. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1202 Can you get your friends and family to sign this informed-consent form? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1203 Dr. Stilton, your research on cultures avoids most common trappings. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1204 Now we just wait to see who got the placebo and who got the heavy dose of MakeRatErol 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1205 Yes, I suppose tenure is a form of positive feedback. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1206 Oh no problem, it's just that your are so unlike most of our research subjects!" 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1207 So, how did our side fair in the corn maze trial? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1208 and since we both find mousy attractive . . 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1209 The president assured us the vaccine is safe. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1210 I’m not sore where we can buy lab cats. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1211 Yes, I'd love to join you after work for a hunk of cheese. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1212 My favorite movie was "The Fly" so I feel quite comfortable here. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1213 Excellent! Your species is now free to go. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1214 I'm Annette. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1215 She finds the vaccine or else she gets the maze again. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1216 Is this another PETA protest, Perkins? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1217 You're male. You're white. Let's test your toxicity.” 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1218 It’s great to have community buy-in for this experiment. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1219 I cannot wait to get back in the cage. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1220 I understand many of your ancestors worked in labs. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1221 Yes, I can see why you want me to conduct the field study. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1222 Sorry I'm late. This place is like a maze. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1223 I'll see if I can find some humans to order from our catalogue.... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1224 I'm really hoping I can follow your example by getting out of this maze and starting a lab of my own. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1225 It didn't say "Chocolate Mouse". 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1226 I just don't think that a MacArther Genius Grant will ever be awarded for discovering a new variety of cheese. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1227 According to data, lab rats also suffer from the human condition. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1228 I told you to go out. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1229 Martin tells me you already know your way around... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1230 There's a new job posting that seems perfect for you. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1231 You heard what I said. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1232 Um yes, that shipment of test Humans should be here this afternoon 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1233 Yes, I have heard of gym rats. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1234 The see from your new appearance that you took part in the Covid-19 vaccine trials. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1235 Let me show you to your corner hole." 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1236 If you show me yours I'll show you mine. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1237 Clearly, we should have spent more time on the job description. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1238 That last formulae is a winner, Dr. Karloff! Can I be a gerbil in the next test? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1239 I'd like to report success with our transmutation experiment. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1240 Ahhh, this is a little awkward. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1241 Squeak as you may, but the Nobel Prize in genetics was worth our sacrifice. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1242 Just Bleach and Lysol? That’s the result of months of research? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1243 Respectfully Dr. I think you have missed an obvious side effect of your vaccine. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1244 Great results! Now tell me no rodents used, only republicans, right? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1245 The men still haven’t found their way way around the maze. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1246 Well yes, the hallway system is intricate, complex and convoluted... but on the bright side, you got here in 47 seconds. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1247 The good news is that rats are not feeling any side effects. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1248 Yes, I know you and your colleagues would prefer that we stop testing potentially harmful new vaccines on lab mice. But, just think of how well it actually worked out for you! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1249 I am not sure about doing “anything in the name of science”. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1250 I just want you to know sir, I was personally always opposed to the whole electrodes thing. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1251 I'm honored that you asked me out to lunch, doctor, but I must warn you, I'm allergic to cheese. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1252 So I hear you tried the vaccine. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1253 Your advances in the maze especially sound recognition were so off the charts we’re ecstatic you’re joining us 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1254 Yes! AMAZING results. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1255 I'm sorry, Dr. Fauci, but I don't think volunteering for the vaccine trial was a good choice for you. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1256 If I get it right can I have a piece of cheese? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1257 Even if you have an itsy-mousy dick it's still sexual harrassment. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1258 It was only tall white men, now it's tall white mice getting tenure. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1259 My family thinks I'm a lab rat, too." 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1260 Rat brains are all the rage now. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1261 Of course life experience counts but we still require a college degree. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1262 You don't look like your photo. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1263 Take a left, then a right, then two lefts, oh, just follow your nose 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1264 I'm in charge of subject recruitment and relations. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1265 Now that you're head of the department, I suppose we'll have to start using humans instead of rats as subjects. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1266 I think I'm positive... 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1267 No antidote yet, Doctor, but I understand Disneyland expects to reopen soon and is hiring. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1268 Please stop reminding me about safety protocols. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1269 Sir, the guinea pigs are saying they are being treated unfairly. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1270 Good news! The vaccine works in humans, now we can try it in rodents! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1271 Please tell me again Professor, which vial did you accidentally drink from? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1272 Seems we both have imposter syndrome 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1273 No doctor, I didn't find your report cheesy at all. I thought it ratical! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1274 Ill get right on it, Doc Hickory Dickery. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1275 They tell me your family has been doing lab work for generations. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1276 I'm sorry to say but your a mouse now but at least your appearance improved from how you used to look (women sighs jews are really ugly). 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1277 I knew you were a shoe-in for a promotion when I saw how quickly you ran through the maze. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1278 This is going to sound crazy, but based on the cognitive tests, I think some of the lab rats are capable of sophisticated thought processes. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1279 You and your friends can thank POTUS for the new law commanding us to go directly to human trials! 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1280 So what happens after the maze? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1281 I suspect you know which one of us will receive the trial dose. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1282 When they said I would be working in the biggest mouse lab, I had no idea! 1.3333 0.33333 6 5 0 1
1283 Oh, hi! I didn't hear you come in. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1284 So tell me. I'm all ears. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1285 You may want to ditch the suit before starting the maze. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1286 Sorry, I had to move your cheese to the bottom shelf to make room for my test tubes. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1287 The labs look good. Your mouse-to-mouse resuscitation made all the difference! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1288 We only test with rabbits and humans here. Why do you ask? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1289 Well, we tried hamsters but they’re too cute. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1290 You can tell the President that injecting cheese is showing a lot of promise. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1291 Jeez cheese 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1292 If it’s as contagious as COVID-19 we’ll have to lock up all the cats! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1293 Let me guess, you weren't in the control group. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1294 OF COURSE WE TESTED IT ON HUMANS FIRST 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1295 Have you also been produced in this lab?" 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1296 You rat you drank my elixir 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1297 With all due respect doctor, I think I’ve been spending too much time in the lab. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1298 Good news! You can still run the maze whenever you like! And no one has moved your cheese...promise! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1299 Are those human cells? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1300 I told you not to experiment on yourself! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1301 So, I'm sure you can appreciate just how successful our genetics research has been!" 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1302 So are animal studies now out of the question? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1303 Trump wants you to lead the COVID task force. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1304 Still no humans in the maze, but we're compensating with diversity training! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1305 Before we proceed, are you familiar with our human resource policy? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1306 Well until all the effects were known, you should have worn a mask. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1307 The folks at the top are saying we can skip animal studies all together. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1308 For the hundredth time, it was an accident! 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1309 Not to sound cheesy, but your COVID-19 symptoms appear to be progressing. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1310 I think it’s time to experiment on humans, don’t you? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1311 Good news. Your tests are back. Bad news. Not conclusive. Results are positive, not so positive, negative, and not so negative. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1312 The board wants to congratulate you on keeping the lab so squeaky clean. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1313 The good news is the side effects from the gene therapy should wear off in a few years, the bad news is Trump was reelected. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1314 I was wondering if I could bend your ears. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1315 I wouldn't worry about it. That definitely is a badly-engineered mousetrap. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1316 I'm concerned my new growth hormone may have gotten into the wrong hands. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1317 A woman with a clipboard in her hands is talking to a man-sized mouse in glasses. Both are wearing labcoats. Around, assorted laboratory equipment, four test tubes, and two sheets of papers. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1318 ... this test is completely useless. I wonder who did this Mickey Mouse job. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1319 Not that there's anything wrong with mouselike side effects. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1320 Frankly, sir, I think the University's 'Diversity in Staffing' program may occasionally go a bit too far. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1321 It's a lot like timeshare".... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1322 I said,“How are your new hearing aids working out?” 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1323 Remember, there will be no human experiments. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1324 Your resume is impressive, but your cheese allergy might keep you from completing the maze. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1325 I'm sorry doctor, but I'm not going to try the vaccine just yet. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1326 I remember when you were an intern here, running through mazes. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1327 The vaccine works - but only in humans. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1328 Dr. Rodenti, please. These successful cell culture alternatives must finally replace human vivisection. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1329 ... and after graduating from PETA University, I spent my post-doc with the World Wildlife Fund 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1330 Well, now we know which one of us was in the control group 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1331 I’m the lab human you sent for. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1332 I don't think your symptoms have anything to do with Covid-19. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1333 Are you here for the pain study or the breeder position? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1334 I have good news and bad news, Algernon. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1335 I don't want your ears, so I guess I'll choose middle. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1336 I don’t give a rat’s ass what you think about it 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1337 Next time stay away from the mice when we're doing the cloning experiments 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1338 Well, sir, I've never tried running through a maze before but I'm willing to try it. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1339 Do you think we are ready to move beyond the human trials,Doctor? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1340 I have finally identified your parents 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1341 And the cats signed on for this? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1342 Tell me your latest research findings. I'm all ears. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1343 They say listen to the scientists, but on this issue you've been quiet as a . . . uh . . .uh . . . 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1344 Mmmm... The secret formula also made your tail much thicker and longer. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1345 Well yes, you're correct. When I told you your father was Professor Watkins, I was indeed stretching the truth a little bit. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1346 Hi, I'm the new test subject. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1347 First, I want to assure you that no mice have been harmed in the making and filling of these test tubes. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1348 First, I have to say I really appreciate your ancestral legacy to science. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1349 It seems as thought the COVID vaccine has one itsy bitsy side effect on humans that we didn't see in the mouse tests. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1350 Umm...you'll need to take off that lab coat for what I need you to do. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1351 I’m sorry but I just don’t think the rat race is for me. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1352 I hope you're not a misogynistic rat. 1.3333 0.33333 6 5 0 1
1353 Yes, we can determine who moved your cheese. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1354 Sorry to pry, but what have you done with Dr. Hebert? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1355 We’re all voting on what your DNA might be 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1356 No animals were harmed in this experiment. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1357 It looks promising, but cures that work in humans may not work in mice 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1358 We're making progress but still don't know who moved your cheese. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1359 Hello Dr. Mus Musculacui, we are just about to begin the pre- clinical testing on your relatives. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1360 No, my brother Basil is the detective 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1361 Remember when you started here in the downstairs lab? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1362 When they told me I’d be working with a lab rat, I expected a rat in a small cage. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1363 Experience? Well, Doctor, my last job at the cosmetics lab was to test, ah, using, ah . . . I was a waitress. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1364 Your expertise is needed to develop a product that keeps surfaces squeaky clean. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1365 Any idea what happened to the cheese cultures? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1366 We may have more luck with the human subjects if, instead of cheese, we place money in the maze. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1367 You haven't read the Warning Label about side effects? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1368 I think you’re amazing 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1369 I didn't know this what was meant by a "laboratory rat." 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1370 I enjoyed your "Rats to Riches" autobiography. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1371 Should I call you Stuart or Dr. Little? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1372 Glad you're on the vaccine team. I know your work from the maze trials. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1373 Whoa..so YOU do the human testing! 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1374 So, you believe it should be an acceptable side effect?" 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1375 So, are you excited for bring your kids to work day tomorrow? 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1376 I'm afraid the vaccine has some side effects 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1377 No student pranks - trust me, it can backfire. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1378 We don't say 'Lab rats' anymore Sam, this is the 42nd century for God's sake. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1379 I started here as an intern, how about you? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1380 Only 2 of our lab subjects showed signs of orange skin after 2 days. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1381 Well, yes, I did ask IT for a better mouse... 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1382 Well professor I’ll make sure we stop all testing on mice. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1383 I'm glad they hired the new diversity officer, too. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1384 Sorry. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1385 It’s back to your old job in vaccine trials today. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1386 You, Larry, are living proof that our Rodent Affirmative Action Program is a big success! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1387 I knew our Diversity Officer wanted to promote an internal employee, but... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1388 So, who moved my synthetic cheese? 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1389 You're still the most successful experiment we've run. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1390 Y'know, there's this really great cheese place down on 3rd. Have you ever been? Yes, right, of course you have. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1391 You make it all seem worthwhile 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1392 So I imagine you’ve heard the “lab rat” bit before? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1393 No, I didn't bring a cheese sandwich for lunch. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1394 Your scores on running the labyrinth are outstanding. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1395 I just wanted to congratulate you on successfully mapping the Havarti genome. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1396 I expect there will be more of you showing up? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1397 The data is conclusive...we have the same father. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1398 we estimate 4-6 months for the reversal serum to be available in cheese form 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1399 Happy Hello-Win to my fellow lab rats, Señorita. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1400 It may have started with a bat, but it will end with a mouse. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1401 Are you trying to slip me a Mickey? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1402 Of course I remember you. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1403 Sorry for the systemic musophobia . 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1404 And now we are colleagues! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1405 I'm fine with cheese for lunch... again. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1406 Not really sure how I'd do on an exercise bike. Why do you ask? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1407 Rumor has it that you are involved with one of the test mice. This must stop or it will compromise the research. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1408 I must admit sir, we seem to have done an excellent job with you 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1409 Oh, so that’s why they stopped calling it Human Resources. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1410 I'm glad you found us. I know it's a maze out there. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1411 And when you get hungry, the cafeteria is to your right, left, left, right, left, straight, right, straight, left, and then you push on the big lever. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1412 Well, this is quite a change of pace. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1413 Congrats on your 60th child. You must be so proud. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1414 I feel trapped here. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1415 I’ve hit a dead end. I’m hoping your extensive research experience can help me out. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1416 Do you really think, "Mouse lives matter?" 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1417 As vaccine side effects go, I've seen worse ... " 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1418 Well, no one can say you haven't worked your way up from the bottom. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1419 I understand you worked your way up from the bottom. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1420 I escaped the maze. What's my next assignment? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1421 We understand that the White House has chosen you to be our new lab director. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1422 Who’s the leader of the band that’s made for you and me? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1423 Now that you’re outside the maze you need to pay for food 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1424 I've worked out you can't change me back! You lied, Professor! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1425 And you still don’t see a conflict of interest? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1426 You're required to wear your ear muffs in this lab. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1427 I think you are a great candidate to be first in line for the vaccine 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1428 So you're telling me a piece of cheese at graduation will help me find my way through med school too? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1429 Could you recommend a decent headset for Zoom calls? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1430 And, lastly, I would appreciate it if you would stop nibbling on the cheddar in the refrigerator with my name on it. 1.3333 0.18257 6 5 1 0
1431 Congratulations, Professor! You were right! Cats don’t have nine lives! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1432 The humans need a larger maze, Sir. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1433 Well, I am very impressed with the mazes you had to go through to join us. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1434 I'm so sorry about your parents. I had no idea.... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1435 Good news! Your brother is cancer-free! 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1436 It worked! You became a standing mouse 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1437 Glad you found the lab. This place is a maze! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1438 I'm not sure how this rapid growth hormone works. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1439 Can you give me some tips on how to find the cheese in the maze? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1440 Oh, my--I didn't expect that. Nevertheless, has your sense of smell returned? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1441 How quickly did the other three go blind? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1442 Good News! The results of the experiment showed that the smart serum works well on mice. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1443 So it says here that you have experience with growth hormones! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1444 Are you sure you want to try the fourth vial? The first three test subjects went blind. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1445 I quit! The job is confusing and lacks any form of effective incentives. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1446 We are close to identifying which genes influence ear size. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1447 I think it’s time for me to get out of this, you’ll excuse the expression, “rat race” 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1448 No Karen, you were not complimenting me when you called me a Lab rat. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1449 Finally, a colleague who can get through this maze of red tape! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1450 Welcome Maurice! You really outgrew your previous role, didn't you... 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1451 I respect a boss who worked his way up from the bottom 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1452 I continue to be impressed by how high you worked your way up after starting out as a specimen." 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1453 You are correct Doctor, yours is an unexpected side effect of the vaccine testing in a few cases. However as the new condition is deemed 'non-life threatening' we decided to continue testing... 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1454 It’s not personal, it’s business. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1455 ...and it tastes like cheese? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1456 PETA really outdid itself this time! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1457 Did you say roll up your sleeve ? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1458 My, professor, what big ears you have. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1459 I’d suggest you go home. The other vaccine side effects are purring in the lab. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1460 We were hoping use you for another experiment. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1461 Good news, Doctor. All we have to do is find the mouse that has your head. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1462 Did everyone else in the control group turn into a mouse? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1463 I'm really impressed by how you've grown into the job. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1464 You may have made it out of the maze, but good luck finding your way out of academia. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1465 On the other hand, your hearing is much better. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1466 I know, but EVERYTHING causes tumors in mice. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1467 Yes, I’m fully aware of how many mazes you had to complete before you shattered the plexiglass ceiling. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1468 What do you wanna do tonight Pinky? 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1469 Is that the only side effect? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1470 Why, yes, I'm amazed. 1.3333 0.12599 15 10 5 0
1471 So somewhere in the maze I will find cheese?! 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1472 I believe in promoting from within. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1473 We did a genetic sweep to make sure that you're not related to any of our subjects. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1474 I remember when you were just a kid running in our mazes to get to the cheese. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1475 Is a DNA test really necessary? I think it's fairly obvious who the father is. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1476 For the last time, you can't keep dressing up as a mouse and expecting to get the vaccine before everyone else, Fred. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1477 Doctor, we're experiencing some difficulty with the human race. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1478 When my vaccine is almost ready, you’ll be the first to try it. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1479 I was thinking maybe Jeff Goldblum for you and Jodie Foster for me... 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1480 Yes, Doctor. We just put the humans in the maze but we need a little more cheese. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1481 I see that the recent gene editing experiment was a success. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1482 When they said they were sending over a new lab rat, I had no idea! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1483 Which brings us to peer review. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1484 We use to smoke on planes too...but let's move on... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1485 It wasn't personal, just business. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1486 Hi, I have some gruyere and a nice Cabernet at home, if you're interested. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1487 The good news doctor is that you do not have Covid-19. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1488 It worked on Trump, so now we'll test it on a larger population of stable geniuses. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1489 The boss is a Maine Coon. Don't let that laid back attitude fool you. He can be a real animal. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1490 It cures COVID, so what if it doesn't smell like Cheddar? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1491 I think I have finally found you a mate! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1492 Good news! Only one of your siblings grew an extra limb in this last round of experiments! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1493 I think you will find our benefits package far exceeds other labs where you have worked. 1.3333 0.15936 15 11 3 1
1494 It's time we have a serious talk about your ultimate role on our team. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1495 My, you've come a long way since escaping from the lab last year. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1496 We should have our Cheeziclon chip formula ready for you on Monday 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1497 Um, I have good news and bad news. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1498 We have the test results back, Algernon. The father is Stewart Little. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1499 The real maze will be learning to navigate our healthcare system. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1500 I am sorry about your family. We were told they loved a maze. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1501 Only four experimental cheeses to evaluate? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1502 I'm sorry Professor, I don't feel comfortable injecting myself 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1503 Have you noticed any adverse reactions to the vaccine? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1504 We think you'll find the management track much more fulfilling 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1505 Yes it is rare for someone like me to work in the lab. I’m just here for a photo shoot. Marketing wants it to look like we have women scientists 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1506 Any particular reason you are researching fatalities caused by blood thinners? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1507 We've concluded it won't be effective against Covid-19, but it could wipe out toenail fungus. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1508 "Great mask, Professor. But I already have a boyfriend." 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1509 I am honored to work with a true lab rat. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1510 I wouldn't minimize these results. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1511 Good one, Frank. I’m going as a pithed frog. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1512 So how long do the side effects last? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1513 I know. I have to test it on humans first. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1514 Lab rat? He’s my cousin! 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1515 Yes, I'd say that you exceeded our expectations. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1516 Roquefort. Why? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1517 Dr. Willard? I...I...What a pleasant surprise! 1.3333 0.15936 15 11 3 1
1518 Sorry, I don't date mice I work with. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1519 I know it's snake oil, but Donald said we had to call it a COVID vaccine. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1520 I know you’re the “Lab Rat” but. . . 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1521 I know this study is on bestiality. I'm still not dating you. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1522 Obviously, the experiment did not go as planned but I’m sure that Chuck E. Cheese would love to hire you. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1523 I'm honored to work with you, you're an important model for research. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1524 I don't mean to be disrespectful, but these tests already work in lab rats 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1525 Thanks for volunteering to become a subject for the new COVID vaccine, but we're looking for humans at this stage! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1526 Good morning, Dr. Brill. I see you read my paper and tried the procedure --- I am sorry it turned out you are type M! I think I know how to counteract the unfortunate result 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1527 Ironically, it was torturing your ancestors in this very lab that made this all possible. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1528 How does it feel to be both feared and respected? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1529 you look familiar, is it the tie? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1530 Hanta for a cure. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1531 OK boss, we’re switching to stuffed animals. The rodent thing is history.” 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1532 Thanks for putting on clothes. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1533 Here's the vaccine that protects rodents like you from the mousetrap plague. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1534 so sorry that you failed your phase 2 Covid test 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1535 I’m sorry, but DNA doesn’t lie. They’re all yours . 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1536 I think we’ve finally done it—cheddar perfume! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1537 You're bonkers if you want me to try that! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1538 We’re getting very close to the Gruyere. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1539 Uh...yes, I do see that we need to increase the N and I want to help. Might I suggest the new tech? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1540 Good, you found us. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1541 Oh they were kidding, don’t worry! Fat cats is just slang 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1542 So... this is really quite a step up for you isn't it? 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1543 Yes, our children would still be Jewish. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1544 Good news doc, we cured your disease..although, there was a side effect we did not expect... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1545 Congrats on your promotion 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1546 So, were there any other side effects of your vaccine trial? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1547 Your experience in laboratories should prove helpful. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1548 This vaccine development sure has turned into a rat race 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1549 Why should we do the initial tests on Humans? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1550 I promise that your family will not be used in the experiment. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1551 I'm a lab rat myself 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1552 I'm feeling much better. Yesterday you were a giant fruit fly. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1553 Doctor, have you considered that you may be over-identifying with your work? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1554 Yes, you surpassed all expectations in the experiment. No, you don’t get to be cited as a co-author. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1555 Good news, I'm pregnant. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1556 So, you're asking me to go through a life size maze in search of a slice of decadent chocolate cake? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1557 You can take of your mask in here, George. 1.3333 0.33333 6 5 0 1
1558 Since you initiated the positive reinforcement, I have been finding my way out of your mazes in record time. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1559 Let me just end your performance review by saying that you have grown immensely in your position here, both personally and professionally. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1560 Do all interns at Disney Labs run experiments? 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1561 Your vaccine is showing progress, Leonard. No tail, no whiskers, and standing upright represent a significant reduction in side-effects. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1562 Well, this Christmas, all through this lab, a mouse and a chemist are gonna be stirring. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1563 Great news Dr. Mousenstin! After extensive gene testing we've found a cure for narcissism. How about we call it November 3rd? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1564 Today you’ll be working on genetically modified cheese. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1565 CRISPR technology? Yeah, it's a rat race. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1566 Will I have to run through any mazes? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1567 I've thought about transitioning, too. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1568 Uh oh. Don’t freak out but I may have messed up. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1569 peanut butter or cheese? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1570 Welcome to the lab. I hope it wasn't hard to find. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1571 I guess I could have switched a tube. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1572 Good news. The last human experiment is a success. Time for rat clinical trials. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1573 Yes, I believe you were in the trial group. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1574 We agree, the maze is so old school. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1575 Well, uh, Dave, the good news is we have a publishable result... 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1576 To be fair, it does confer long lasting immunity in dog years 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1577 At least you’re willing to listen to science. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1578 Should we conduct mouse or human trials first? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1579 Did you eat my grilled cheese that I left in the breakroom? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1580 So you're saying, you want to know how it would affect a thirty-something woman? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1581 For the USA, the data are clear, scientists are the leading killer of rats." 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1582 Sure, I'll be your guinea pig! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1583 I want to be a lab rat just like you one day. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1584 You were correct about the cookie hypothesis. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1585 Can you read this and tell me if it sounds cheesy? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1586 I made a few wrong turns and there were dead ends but do I get the job? 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1587 I can see how a medical breakthrough has been successful in trials with mice for increased size and intelligence. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1588 So I see that you were promoted from within. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1589 Maybe this time we could try something other than cheese? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1590 I'm shocked! We never administer performance enhancing drugs to our research subjects! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1591 I understand that you're an expert in mazes. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1592 You seem to know so much about the Plague. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1593 I don't hear any little squeaking noises. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1594 I’m worried that if we hire you to work here you’ll be trapped in a dead-end job. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1595 This Phase 1 self test turned me into a hideous human. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1596 Someone grabbed the Rodent-19 vaccine by mistake. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1597 Would you like to meet for cheese and crackers after work? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1598 Dr. Algernon, it's so exciting to have you joining our lab! 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1599 Our cats will take care of you! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1600 Dr. Katz called. He wants to eat you for lunch. I mean meet you for lunch. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1601 Your 'lived experience' insights into laboratory work are most helpful. 1.3333 0.33333 6 5 0 1
1602 Our collaborations have gone so well in the past. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1603 Maybe we should pause our vaccine trial, Dr. McGregor, to look into your response. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1604 Time for another experiment. Tell me, do you like mazes? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1605 I so admire the personal commitment you bring to our research here. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1606 The good news is the white House wants it fast tracked for approval 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1607 Honestly, Dr. Algernon. I do not think that ‘Cheese Potion #9’ will market well. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1608 We think you are ready for the ultimate maze. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1609 As you suggested, we will be using cats for our next experiment." 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1610 Nothing to restore your face yet, professor, but number 3 there might shrink your ears a bit. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1611 . . . you are so articulate . . . I can’t speak for the other people around here but I don’t have a speciest bone in my body . . . and, and I love 'Dilbert,' and, and, and some of my best friends are rodents . . ."and, and, and, and . . . . 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1612 Sorry about your parents. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1613 I just realized that you're a rodent in a lab coat. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1614 Oh, so you’re the mole that’s infiltrated this lab. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1615 Chief, we've got a lead on that farmer's wife. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1616 This is a little awkward, Stewart, but I put a ham and cheese sandwich in the fridge, and now it's just a ham sandwich. I don't want to imply anything inappropriate here, but I was wondering if maybe you, well, you know, knew anything about that? 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1617 I’m flattered that you want me for an experiment, but … 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1618 Looks like your cousin tested well 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1619 The entire lab commends your willingness to self experiment. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1620 Wow, you've come a long way from those labyrinth tests! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1621 I’m sorry I was late, but I’m sure you know what a maze this building is. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1622 At the rate you're progressing, I don't think you'll ever have to go back in that cage. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1623 Don't get too close. It's a better mousetrap. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1624 The proposal is to genetically modify cats to eliminate their hunting instinct. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1625 Your grant for a new maze has been approved, but I'm afraid The Board will not fund any increase in cheese. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1626 Our advisor is a cat, but he's away right now. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1627 I wouldn't be that concerned. Trump says it's safe. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1628 I did not know those rats were co-workers. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1629 Good news! Your uncle seems to be recovering well. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1630 Ironically, the cure for CoVid is Stilton cheese. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1631 Congratulations, you just squeaked by on your lab midterm. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1632 I'm not comfortable putting babies in a maze. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1633 The vaccine results are great, just dont look in the mirror yet Dr Mickey. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1634 So you're the hundredth generation of your family to work for a research lab... 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1635 Rats! I’ve forgotten which serum I gave you. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1636 I suppose, in this case, calling me "mousy" is a complement. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1637 I assure you that, now, we only use gerbils. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1638 You're rude to the patients and spend most of your time eating cheese, but damned if you weren't right again, Doctor Mouse. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1639 The GMO Grant Review Committee is Here 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1640 Only on humans. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1641 what's a defining moment that shaped your identity? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1642 Hey, now there’s a coincidence. This sample also reproduces at an alarming rate. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1643 How do you like being on this side of the bench? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1644 How long have you been experimenting with DNA? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1645 What do you specialize in again? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1646 Dr. Little, right? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1647 Good news, test results indicate that large ears are a significant factor in high intelligence of the brain. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1648 Doctors, I see the experiment was a success! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1649 Yes, you're brilliant, but our research firm has more pressing projects than cat eradication. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1650 Face it and stop complaining, just look at you and admit the experiment was a success 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1651 You've developed an effective vaccine - but I'm not sure the side effects will be acceptable. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1652 Would you know anything about the giant hole in my office? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1653 There would’ve been no opportunities for either of us back in Hamelin. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1654 There is no match between you and the lab mice. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1655 I'm sure you're familiar how testing works here in labs....... 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1656 Geronimo, you’ve become the perfect boyfriend. I think I can finally give you that cookie. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1657 I made sure to put your friends in the placebo group 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1658 So do you just call rat poison "poison"? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1659 You'll be pleased to learn that this experiment does not involve a maze. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1660 The human trials have shown positive results, we’re ready to begin animal testing 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1661 Wait until you see the maze from above. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1662 Who built the cages? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1663 No way, Mary. It's your turn to take one for the team. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1664 Dr. Donaldson please invite your colleages, we are ready for testing. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1665 I think is time for human trials 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1666 I spoke to HR and they said as long as you are okay with it I can dress up as cat-woman for Halloween 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1667 Well, you did certainly get in on the ground floor 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1668 I read Of Mice and Men in High School but this is ridiculous. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1669 Well, Arnie, I’m sorry. I know your position on vivisection but this time is different. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1670 Doctor, I think I located the chemical that turned you into a mouse. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1671 Well, Mr Mus Musculus, no evolution bogus, ain't no rats cousin, no Darwin in the Mouse-room. So may be we should try to cure Covid19 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1672 I wonder if we both make men feel equally inferior. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1673 Now this is how we win the vaccine rat race 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1674 Yeah so you will be doing the 12 week experimental testing with us correct? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1675 Early testing shows it's effective on humans. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1676 This product is for mice, so you have appear in the commercial saying you recommend it. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1677 This lab does have a reputation for career progression! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1678 Don’t take this the wrong way, but you look exactly like the last guy. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1679 Well...isn’t this awkward. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1680 The good news is we found a new way to genetically test moral equivalence. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1681 Ahem, about the test subjects.... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1682 Well, to be honest, you are the only one who solved the bureaucratic labyrinth to get this research funded 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1683 Are you here to spread a disease or treat a disease 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1684 'Actually, I'm 1/16 rodent' 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1685 Boy the warning label on my medication was not kidding when it said "May cause ironic side effects" 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1686 Yes, it seems we have come up with a better mousetrap 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1687 So, who's the lab rat? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1688 Yes sir, the experiments on the humans are going quite well - in fact, they're yet to notice that they're under observation and that we're not experimenting on mice 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1689 At this moment in time, it looks like the experiment is going very well in rats 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1690 We always promote from within here. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1691 I assure you, graduate work is far more rewarding. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1692 It's your turn to run the maze missy. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1693 I’m looking for the big Cheese 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1694 The humans are getting restless, sir. We're going to need more cheese. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1695 I know this floor is a maze but if we're going to get anything done you have to find the lab faster. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1696 i should have told you that the testing would be done on......you 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1697 You’ll be in Maze 6, with the other humans 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1698 This building is a bit of a maze but you'll learn your way around pretty quickly I would think. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1699 I think the Trump administration misunderstood the term lab rat, yet, here we are... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1700 That's right, just drink the solution and then I'll lead you to the maze ma'am 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1701 Your experience spreading diseases makes you the president’s ideal candidate for head of pandemic response. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1702 Fortunately, the preliminary results are trending well on Twitter. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1703 I said Beaker, not Squeaker! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1704 Well I’d say my favorite type of maze is a corn maze, why do you ask? 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1705 It’s nice to have someone that has so much experience in all aspects of this research. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1706 I think you’ve misunderstood your role here. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1707 Wow, 2020 has become a real rat race 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1708 I’m docking you two cheese curds Lisa! Get back to work!!! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1709 I'm impressed with how quickly you got here. The hallways in this building are quite a maze. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1710 It’s great that the company promotes from within. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1711 My how the tide has turned 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1712 This week’s humans performed excellently... and not a trace of resentment! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1713 Your lab assistant quit. He found a better gig at chuck-e-cheese. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1714 And here I thought the cat would get us before we found a vaccine! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1715 Yeah my mom can’t stop talking about her first-born moving out of the subway and getting a job in research 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1716 It's conclusive professor: it's not good to take your work at home 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1717 Thank god we got rid of all the mousetraps 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1718 I hope you don’t mind me saying so...I just think it’s so cool how you worked your way up. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1719 Ok...I drank one vial. Now it’s your turn 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1720 I suppose we can let her out of the cage, it is take your daughter to work day after all. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1721 Note to self: no more triple espresso shots before work. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1722 Once again, I’d like to apologize for the way you were treated in the lab’s first experiment. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1723 What a relief, I’m usually the lab rat. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1724 You know, we should be wearing our masks. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1725 One or the two of them is Patient Zero of this recent suspension of things 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1726 3rd stage trials are promising but people on Twitter still say you don’t look trustworthy 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1727 Well, I see phase 1 of the experiment worked Dr. Mousi; wait... wheres our subject... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1728 Good enough. We need to get it out before the election. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1729 We pride ourselves in hiring from within. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1730 The transplant’s been a success 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1731 Well Michael, you always did want to be a lab rat when you grew up" 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1732 Who cut the cheese? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1733 Er, I swear, I don’t know where they hid the cheese. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1734 When they told me I'd be working with lab rats, I was expecting something a little smaller and in a cage. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1735 Congratulations Dr. Stuart Little, you have been nominated for a Nobel Prize for your groundbreaking work in growth hormone therapy. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1736 I just want to say Mortimer, it’s an honor to work in your lab & for a pioneer who has totally changed the role of animals in new product testing! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1737 Now, one last test question before allowing you to enter society: would You ever perform unethical lab experiments on humans? 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1738 So how have the Human trials been? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1739 You look a bit different Nathan. New Haircut?" @newyorkercartoon 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1740 You may have noticed that the new vaccine has a few side effects. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1741 You know, I think my great Aunt Harriet would have loved you. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1742 So you scored better on the maze than me. No need to mouse-splain everything.” 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1743 We did all rodently posible to save it. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1744 Yes, it’s true what they say about NY. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1745 Congratulations, as you know, you are the result of years of growth hormone testing. 1.3333 0.23570 9 7 1 1
1746 Yes, it is rectally administered 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1747 Ah, I see you were in the vaccine group? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1748 You're here from inspection? I'm not sure who ratted on us, but I trust you'll find our lab squeaky clean 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1749 I thought you needed all the help, I heard some of your kind suggested injecting disinfectant! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1750 The latest tests in cats are promising. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1751 If I knew about the side effects of this vaccine I wouldn’t have given it to you!! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1752 You can have Mr. Toobin’s workspace. We cleaned it. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1753 I don’t know, doctor... is that a new tie? 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1754 Well doctor, I think we can agree that it works... 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1755 i guess you just surprised me, i’ve never thought about lab mice before 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1756 Don’t get me wrong, the disguise is impressive, but I need you to get back in the cage. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1757 It’s only a six month assignment, right? And I’m assuming just the night shift? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1758 We get the vaccine first 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1759 I'm afraid you still test positive for cheese 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1760 I was incredibly impressed with your dissertation defense on maze solutions. Not to be cheesy, but you're going to be our top lab rat!" 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1761 We can agree that rats and women haven’t received the credit we deserve for medical breakthroughs. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1762 In mother Russia, mice test on you. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1763 Would you mind to run some tests for me? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1764 Let me show you to your office, it’s like a maze around here. Actually, yes, it IS a maze around here. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
1765 Of course I believe in science, I'm a major lab rat. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1766 I’m really glad to hear that you’re against animal testing 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1767 This just may work out Mickey. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1768 The term 'lab rat' is politically incorrect, Karen 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1769 You're going to need to get out of the office more. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1770 Quite the plot twist, Algernon. 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1771 Maybe it was easier to work your way up from the bottom in your day... 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1772 Dr. Phillis! It seems I might have overdosed you with some cheesy comments... 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1773 Your first task will be coordinating with our Feline Research Division. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1774 I’m here to review your vaccine studies. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1775 I didn’t expect the “human growth hormone“ to work quite so well! 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1776 Your makeup looks amazing! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1777 I told you I could have been of better use! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
1778 I am impressed by how far entry level resources can advance! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1779 And in this room, we conduct our nominal determinism studies. You’ll be working here. 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1780 I think we were wrong to test the vaccine on you 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1781 Say what? You want to experiment on whom? 1.3333 0.16667 9 6 3 0
1782 Pinky, the Brain has escaped to an internet troll farm to try to take over the world again 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1783 ‘Well, I’m both horrified and proud to now have to request your permission to test out this vaccine for us, Subject 235. Please don’t take it personal.’ 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1784 So, tell me how the latest human trials are going, Dr. Rat? 1.3333 0.15936 15 11 3 1
1785 I think you’ll fit in well. We have quite a few lab rats here. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1786 And finally, this is where you will be working. Any questions? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1787 Tom, you’re the most genetically enhanced person of all time - everyone knows those glasses are fake 1.3333 0.40825 3 2 1 0
1788 Damn, I’m still lactose intolerant 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1789 Worst case we’ll say it’s a temporary side effect 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1790 Are you ready to talk about last night’s Twilight Zone episode? 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1791 You’re fired! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1792 Dr. Test Subject 28591, welcome to my lab. 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1793 Welcome to the team. Our lab is a bit of a maze but I’m sure you’ll figure it out in no time! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1794 Here's to rising through the ranks! 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1795 Well I don't trust human evaluation. @naviedm 1.3333 0.21082 6 4 2 0
1796 I know you grew attached to them, but we need to terminate those four turtle subjects 1.3214 0.11563 28 21 5 2
1797 I can't believe LabRat's have overcome! 1.3125 0.15052 16 12 3 1
1798 So, you're on for the second, the third, the fourth, and the fifth. 1.3125 0.15052 16 12 3 1
1799 Looks like there are a still few side effects to work out of this vaccine 1.3125 0.11968 16 11 5 0
1800 With covid rampant we are not going to hold the Halloween party. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1801 I have good news and bad news about our work with animal studies... 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1802 What do you mean you're feeling trapped? 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1803 You are not a doctor. You are a lab rat! 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1804 Jeffrey Toobin took his dick out on a Zoom call. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1805 I'm humbled by your insight 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1806 The results look good .. now let’s talk about side effects. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1807 It seems like just yesterday I was force feeding you tricalcium phosphate. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1808 Hello, Doctor. I hear the new Covid-19 vaccine has side-effects.” 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1809 So, I hear you are from Mouse Lives Matter...welcome! 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1810 Perhaps we should run a few more tests before approving that vaccine. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1811 Susan, I prefer the title "lab technician"; "lab rat" is just insulting. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1812 Never thought I'd see a lab rat in a lab coat, science really has drastically changed 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1813 The cheese I was experimenting on seems to be missing. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1814 Cheese? I guess you'll just have to find it yourself, mister. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1815 I don't think science knows, actually. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1816 Yes, Doctor, I will gladly take the serum as well. Diving into a hole in the baseboard sounds pretty good right now. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1817 I’m glad your not angry with me Professor. Next time I’ll be sure to label the Test Tubes before you self Test. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1818 No. No reason Dr. Jones. I was just wondering how long you have been working in this lab. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1819 No, I can't say I've ever thought of skipping trials to spare the lives of the small, helpless and slightly cartoonish... 1.3077 0.17485 13 11 2 1
1820 I requested someone experienced with monoclonal, not mouse, antibodies. But maybe you'll suffice. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1821 I don't give a rat's ass what you do with it! 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1822 I know it doesn't seem fair, but no... you won't be allowed to remove part of my brain. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1823 The voting preference surveys from our lab rats have proved more accurate than most polls 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1824 What did you think of my experiment? Squeak up! 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1825 We don’t really use saccharine anymore because… well, you know. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1826 Good News, we got the cheese flavor just right 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1827 Not such a Minnie mouse anymore, am I? 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1828 If I promised there was cheese would you approve my research? 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1829 You'll be happy to hear that all the results are cheesy. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1830 It looks like you just squeaked by. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1831 Yes, there are some small unusual side-effects. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1832 I want to give "bring your kids to work day" new meaning. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1833 I said the experiment was cheesy. I was not referring to you in any way! 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1834 Obviously you’re allergic to cheese. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1835 About that experimental drug, Bob... 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1836 I was just following protocol, Dr. Rattley. I had no idea they were your offspring! 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1837 Really Joe,sometimes you take empathy too far. 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1838 This microdosing is finally producing some results. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1839 I'm sorry. Your cousin Stuart didn't make it. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1840 How's the family doc? 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
1841 I’ll get all the lab cats ready 1.3077 0.17485 13 10 2 1
1842 It's an honor to work with someone who's had so much real-life experience in the lab. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1843 Maybe, we should skip the maze part of the experiment! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1844 Expect a backlash from humans when they learn we're using them as test subjects for this new pesticide 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1845 I guess when you say that I look exceptionally mousy in my labcoat today that means something different? 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1846 The anonymous group I represent wish to file a grievance. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1847 You're a walking cliché. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1848 Were you in the lab over the weekend? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1849 We're not likely to have results as good as we had with you. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1850 Well, I believe cong-rat-ulations are in order. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1851 Okay, but I choose this time. The floors were so sticky at the last place you picked. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1852 Quite frankly, our test results are cheesy. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1853 Sorry I’m late delivering this report, professor. It took me forever to find my way to the lab from the entrance. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1854 HR has warned me that this was the last time I can call you a "Lab Rat" in response to you calling me an "Affirmative Action Experiment." 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1855 We should be able to run a second round of your experiment after we receive a new supply of lab humans. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1856 You are correct, in future we will use lawyers as test subjects, no one likes them, they make lousy pets and there are far too many of them 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1857 This might disappoint you Mickey, sane humans won't drink bleach. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1858 I think Trial #46 trumps Trial #45. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1859 I can’t work for you. You’re my experiment not my boss! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1860 Congratulations! You've built a better mousetrap. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1861 Little humans run the maze well, regardless of their color, but they all would solve it faster if they weren't carrying protest signs. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1862 I told you the new vaccine had side affects. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1863 I see that you took the vaccine on Trump’s recommendation 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1864 I've developed the formula that turns gold to cheese. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1865 We can trace your DNA back to Las Vegas in the 1960's. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1866 Next, we'll decide which of our families to subject to deadly poisoning. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1867 When you said your were a 'lab rat' I had no idea you meant it literally. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1868 I hid your lunch in the maze for old times' sake. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1869 Doctor Mauci? Hahahaha, sorry, couldn't resist." 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1870 And so then I realized that a mouse would lead a study before a woman would. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1871 Dr. Mick, I would like to introduce you to my new Disney clone. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1872 Yes, Dr. Worthier, development this new psychotropic extract is coming along very well. I for one am very confident we’re on the right track. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1873 That was brave of you to test the serum on yourself. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1874 Welcome Doctor, your predecessor was working on a formula that could instantly enlarge lab rats to human size. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1875 Now let me get this straight Dr. Michaels. I'm to drink from one of these four test tubes? 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1876 I've been meaning to tell you that you are showing signs of the side affect we thought might happen. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1877 Yes, I did say “it’s wrong to experiment with mice”, but you’re deliberately taking my words out of context! 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1878 Promise me Garry, you won’t be angry , when I tell you that test tube ‘A’ , was, in fact mis-labeled. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1879 It's hard to imagine just 5 short years ago you were scurrying through that maze. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1880 One last question; How do you feel about working with mice? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1881 I’ve got a hypothocheese. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1882 The humans respond even more strongly to cheese. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1883 Im no longer just a lab rat. They promoted me you know? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1884 My hair is NOT mousy brown! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1885 Turns out all we missed was the use-by date on the yogurt in the break room fridge. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1886 I figure it's easy money, it's all pretty harmless. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1887 Wow...uhh...that proposal certainly would bring a new meaning to the phrase “rat nest”. Hehe ok see you later. #metoo 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1888 These results are impressive for a lab rat! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1889 This might cure cancer, but we have to run a trial on mice. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1890 They told me you started as specimen. Is that true? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1891 They’d like you to do it again to see if you get the same result. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1892 Dr. I said the crackers were CRISPR, not crispy. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1893 I hope you won't hold that little lab mishap against me when considering me for tenure. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1894 We had tried to hire a Pangolin, but we're hopeful you'll work out. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1895 Did you sign up to work with big pharma ? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1896 Harvey, there’s just one minor side affect! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1897 Honestly, I was already impressed when you solved the maze. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1898 Mr. Hyde, how you've changed! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1899 I am sorry President Trump, but we told you to wait until the vaccine protocol was complete! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1900 Glad to see that the side effects of the vaccine are minimal. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1901 I'd like to keep our relationship professional. Besides, I have a cat. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1902 Don't worry,our Mycin drugs are mice-free. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1903 Look at you in charge of the maze now. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1904 You must believe me Stuart. I didn’t know that one of the test subjects was your cousin. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1905 You won't promote me just because I'm not a rat. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1906 I feel like part of the experiment. Again. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1907 Face it. We're both just lab rats. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1908 So you're the asshole who gave a mouse embryo for the Regeneron so Trump would live. I have a experiment that involves a maze and Novichok nerve agent planned for you later today. It's called Putin on the Ritz cracker. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1909 Your assistant is still in the maze. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1910 Oh, I see you did try the vaccine. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1911 Sure, I'd love to go to a corn maze after work! 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1912 I did what you told me to do in my report to the oversight committee, I said that the lab tech's comment that he smelled a rat was just a figure of speech. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1913 I see bias in your study recommending humans now be the testing subjects. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1914 I asked for equal pay rates, not equally paid rats! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1915 How do I explain this gently? I'm sorry, you are not what we meant by Animal Model. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1916 I don't like to be called lab rat either! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1917 The cat specimen has a lethal viral overload 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1918 We appreciate your participation in the research and respect your right to decline participation at any time. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1919 You're just not what we're looking for. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1920 Since we've stopped using animals and started using lawyers as test subjects, here are your first samples. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1921 Professor Spiegelman, we are ready to recreate your father. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1922 Mice? Really? No...no..we do not use mice for experiments. Those are chipmunks. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1923 Maybe you should find some other animal than cats to experiment on. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1924 I know how it smells, but there's no Limburger here. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1925 I’ve heard you worked your way up from the ground floor? 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1926 The bubonic plague was a warm-up,Susan. We’re in control now. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1927 And I thought I was a lab rat. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1928 'The test on Trump strategy for remdesivir has been a real hit with PETA." 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1929 I would hardly say you were an unrepresented minority. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1930 Our newest chemical can't turn you back into a human, but it will fix your cheese addiction. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1931 I think I might take my chances and not take the vaccine. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1932 I hear you have friends helping in our research 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1933 Good work on the clones, Dr. Gonzales. So which one is Speedy? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1934 Have you ever heard of the Stockholm Syndrome? 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1935 I GUESS I'M NOT PREGNANT 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1936 Covid-19 has been great. Such a rush to trials they bypassed us completely. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1937 Dr. Rouse said you were in a league of your own 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1938 Yes sir. I don't know who let the cat into the lab last night. Or, No sir. Dr. Feline didn't say when she was dropping by tonight. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1939 Welcome, your species will probably do better than mine" 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1940 Yes! I remember when you were just a baby house mouse volunteering for biomedical research. Welcome back! 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1941 Our goal is vertical integration. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1942 At least you are Covid free. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1943 Are you sure you want the antidote, Professor? Even your wife tells me she prefers you like this. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1944 The lab is here, but your office is down the hall, three lefts, a right, two more lefts, another right, a left and then a right. Oh, I’m sure you’ll figure it out. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1945 I'm attracted to you too. Species barrier be damned! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1946 I agree, let's use squirrels instead. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1947 Um, no I haven’t seen your wife 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1948 ¨John, may you please ask your brother to submit his feces sample?¨ 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1949 Stepping up from solving mazes? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1950 This concludes our alumni tour. Please, have a drink. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1951 You have been disqualified from the “Build a Better Mousetrap” competition. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1952 I warned you there could be unforeseen side effects if you took the vaccine before it was fully tested. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1953 My qualifications for signing up for this trial are, well, ... I'm human 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1954 Well, we had to test it on someone. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1955 How do you like me now? 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1956 Well, I guess it works better than hydroxychloroquine. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1957 Yes, I did say "I smell a rat", but I wasn't referring to anyone in particular. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1958 Yes. You do have laboratory experience, just not the kind we weee looking for. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1959 that was unexpected 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1960 Listen up! I’m sure you’re all ears! I won't mouse around with you 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1961 Good Morning and welcome to our Laboratory. You'll find the Executive Maze down the hall and to your right. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1962 Sir, we definitely need more time to test the vaccine on you. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1963 I think we're doing really well with vaccine so far, don't you? There seems to be one unusual side effect though... 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1964 You first 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1965 Yes, the human trials are looking good! We should be able to begin the mouse trials any day now. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1966 Well Ray, I see that despite coronavirus having cancelled Halloween, you're determined to get your money out of that costume. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1967 Yes, with Operation Warp Speed, we are allowed to skip the studies in mice. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1968 No, I haven’t a clue who moved your cheese. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1969 It's amazing how much you've grown since we started working together. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1970 I'm so sorry! I meant to say our vaccine development has been more of a "Vax race". 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1971 Just wanted to remind you that next Tuesday is “bring your child to work” day, and you may want to skip participating in it. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1972 Yes, Doctor, the large maze is now available, why do you ask? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1973 Of course, we must acknowledge possible bias in how you interpret the mouse maze results. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1974 I was hoping I'd be working with cute small mice." 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1975 And I appreciate your commitment to diversity and inclusion. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1976 I assume you're already familiarized with our methodology, correct? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1977 Even though you’re my boss now, I still can’t help you find the cheese. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1978 Not to brag but my whole family has been involved in lab testing for years. (In one form or another ) 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1979 You'll be testing our "Better Mousetrap Thru Chemistry." 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1980 It was great meeting your parents, Steve. A shame they had to go so soon. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1981 Next week we start rodent trials...err, I mean, rabbit trials. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1982 The committee agrees, from now on we use only cats. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1983 I think the results pretty much speak for themselves. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1984 'Sorry about the mix-up, sir. The good news is that you can now eat as much cheese as you want. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1985 Sure, we can go with guinea pigs this time. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1986 This position will be... temporary. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1987 For the kind of experiments we do here, I believe you may be overqualified. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1988 Hi, Stuart! Looks like the growth serum is working great! 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1989 By this stage in your career you must be pretty tired of Stuart Little jokes. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1990 My name was clearly written on it. Who would steal my cheese from the break room fridge? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1991 Yes, that lab coat does make you look more professional. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1992 Just wait’ll the family finds out I’m dating a Ph.D! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1993 We’re just waiting on Dr. Guinea-Pig, she’s running a little late, sir. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1994 And, just to make sure, you didn’t try any of this on yourself this morning Doctor? 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1995 The people are complaining about being stuck in cages. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1996 And how long have you been experimenting on mice? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1997 What can I say, sometimes the best laid experiments of... 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
1998 We have already messed this thing up three times in a row. You can not force your ways with The Force. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
1999 So glad to be working in person again, you’ll never guess what Toobin did on the last Zoom call... 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
2000 Most of your nephews survived the test doctor 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
2001 It’s good to meet you in person, obviously you’ve worked in a lab before. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
2002 Looks like we're going to need a new lab ra... er, I mean, 'test subject.' 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
2003 No side effects that I can see! Let’s roll out this vaccine. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
2004 I know, I know, it IS like a maze from here to the parking lot 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
2005 Is there a Mrs. Lab Rat? 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
2006 Looks like someone else broke through the glass ceiling! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
2007 No, I don't recall which vial has the Gouda cheese. Why do you ask? 1.2941 0.11391 17 12 5 0
2008 Given your former role, I'd ask that you please resist the urge to sample the formula. 1.2941 0.14258 17 13 3 1
2009 I'm 99% sure your relatives all got the placebo. 1.2941 0.14258 17 13 3 1
2010 Eureka! I've successfully turned a lab rat into a lab rat. 1.2941 0.14258 17 13 3 1
2011 Well, yes I suppose cats COULD be shown as statistically closer to emulating the human genome. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2012 Yes, I agree that 'laboratory mouse' is not politically correct. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2013 My turn to run the maze? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2014 Doctor, you’re amazing. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2015 „Mice work! Who would have thought that a Kat and a mouse make such a good team.“ 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2016 And to think this time last year you couldn’t even make it through the maze.” 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2017 Have you ever run in, I mean, *run* a lab before? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2018 Side effects? Whatever do you mean? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2019 A non-disclosure agreement may be unnecessary. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2020 It’s right here under side effects! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2021 Doctor, what would you like first, the "cheesy" results or the "squeaky" results? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2022 Congrats on the promotion. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2023 Congratulations on the new job. I know it's hard for women to advance, but frankly, I never thought you would be promoted first. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2024 The mice experiment results are in. Do you want the good news or bad news first? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2025 You were right, Ms. Murphy. There are side effects! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2026 If you don't mind, I would not want to try this on myself. 1.2857 0.12529 14 10 4 0
2027 Yes, I know your brother well! He's in cage FG-25, part of the control group. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2028 I’m about to place the lunch order. Do you want grilled cheese or peanut butter and jelly today 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2029 The lab rats are still not making any progress with the vaccine. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2030 I have some bad news, Dr. Algernon. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2031 None of this was tested on animals, right? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2032 Sir, I hate to rat-out the last person to alter the formula, but... OH, sorry. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2033 Sorry, but your CAT-scan did not go well. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2034 You know, this isn't a rat race 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2035 Yes we used your off spring but they didn’t survive. Would you like to provide more? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2036 Let me guess, cheese pizza, mozzarella sticks and a slice of cheesecake. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2037 I'm glad you found the lab; this building is a maze. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2038 The new batch of mousies just came in. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2039 You got some nerve showing up here, lady.” 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2040 Yes, I speak squeak. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2041 I bet you weren't expecting a doctorate at the end of that maze. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2042 This is a graduate student TinkerToy 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2043 I see you completed the maze and found a doctorate. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2044 The good news is, we didn't kill any mice this time. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2045 I am not only the scientist, I am also the subject! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2046 As usual, Professor, your findings in the lab are absolutely amazing. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2047 Would you like the good news or the bad news? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2048 Maybe we should decrease your dosages. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2049 Which one gives immunity to coronavirus? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2050 Doctor, I hope you can forgive my ancestors for what they did to your ancestors. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2051 The experiment was a success. Just don't look in the mirror. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2052 Your record shows you excelled in mazes. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2053 Sure, I like cheese. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2054 Roy, you don't work for Jack Daniels anymore. Stop stealing sips from the lab vials! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2055 I hope this makes up for all the experiments I performed on you. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2056 Thanks for the sample, but I am so sorry, you've got to be MIGHTY, Mr. Mouse--forty test tubes in a rack, not four! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2057 Do you want the good news or bad? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2058 We hired you because we believe you will have an excellent rapport with our subjects. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2059 Mice evolving... not even the most surprising development of 2020. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2060 I wonder what happens if we give it to humans. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2061 You were right! It made me look like a human. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2062 We're all out of tiny men to run the maze. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2063 AWKWARD! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2064 The only way for the scientific community to stop testing on mice was for them to gain sentience and participate in the process. 1.2857 0.12529 14 10 4 0
2065 Are you ready for your Corona 19 vaccine? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2066 This happens so rarely that the FDA will give us approval anyway. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2067 Well hurry up now, that Covid vaccine isn't going to test itself! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2068 It's not You Bob, it's. . . M. .. . . .Oh hell, ,,It IS you. . .You look too much like a mouse. And even though this is like a grade School Chemeitry lab, certainly not the kind of place for biomedical research with mice, it STILL bothers me! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2069 We need to test this on mice. Do you volunteer? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2070 Professor, are you sure you took the right mixture? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2071 Would you mind running these samples over to Lab B. It's a veritable maze getting there. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2072 So, you want to run your initial trials on lab humans and do your clinical trials on mice. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2073 That's Dr. Lab Rat to you. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2074 Isn't it about time that we experiment on humans for a change? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2075 The human trials were successful. For the next phase, we need some cheese. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2076 OK, I'll humor you. But I really don't think cheese will help the vaccine." 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2077 As you can see, it's working. I look more and more like a test subject every day. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2078 Hello, is it Brie you're looking for? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2079 Somebody has been taking the meds we’ve been giving the rats! I wonder who. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2080 I had a feeling you would graduate as best in maze. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2081 I just want you to know that I'm really happy with your promotion. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2082 Your kids are in daycare playing on the wheel. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2083 Look at you! All grown up! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2084 Lucky for us, love is double blind.” 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2085 Not a creature was stirring...OMG! You’re a MOUSE! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2086 We made you because trump can't tell the difference between rat and his supporters, maybe you'll be the scientist he listens to. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2087 Human Beings are lining up for the COVID-19 vaccinations. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2088 Back for more so soon? I think you need an emergency order from the FDA for that. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2089 Yes, Doctor, I did remember to put your Swiss Cheese lunch in the maze. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2090 Would you take the vaccine when it hits the market? 1.2857 0.12529 14 10 4 0
2091 I have good news for you. The doctor says that your hearing is perfect. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2092 Free TV Idea: Breaking Bad but with acid 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2093 Yes, but did you hear about Toobin? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2094 I'd like to volunteer for your next experiment. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2095 I'm so sorry, but the President says the Pandemic is over, so we need not do any more lab experiments. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2096 Dr. Fauci, I presume. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2097 Are you working on anything that might help change my image? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2098 I understand there are some side effects. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2099 How fabulous; you are genetically altered and now too big to fit in the box to be used as a 'test mouse'. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2100 So you want me to make you human again? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2101 I loved you in Maze Runner. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2102 You appear to have the right qualifications. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2103 You've been nominated for a Nobel for your maze theory breakthrough. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2104 And to think it was just last year you were pressing a button to get a food pellet! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2105 Wait a minute, those buttons, are you wearing a female lab coat 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2106 It worked fine on the rats. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2107 Your running on the treadmill has paid off in finding a cure, sir! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2108 At least you never forget where you parked. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2109 Based on your research, I believe we’re ready to start testing humans. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2110 Please..no cheesy sales pitches. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2111 Yes, I do enjoy working with mice. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2112 Yes sir! We haven’t used rats since we got your memo. We are using cats now.” 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2113 We have just sequenced the new gene for the novel mouse virus...CATTACA 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2114 Don't work too late. You might get trapped in here. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2115 While your research is not full of holes, it's highly unusual to run tests on lab students. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2116 Wow. This is a bit embarrassing. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2117 No, I'm sure, you're not supposed to drink this stuff. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2118 I must say, you've really moved up the ranks around here. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2119 Interesting findings... do we get the cheese now? 1.2857 0.15430 7 6 1 0
2120 Do you identify as a man or a mouse? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2121 Looks like the Phase II testing is going well.... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2122 At least it cured your cattiness. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2123 Let's start with something simple . . . Where's the exit? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2124 They still think it came from a bat. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2125 All feline testing. Mice and guinea pig free. 1.2857 0.12529 14 10 4 0
2126 Yes, I'm certain that you were in the control group. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2127 See, working for big Parma isn't too bad! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2128 The good new, Disney called, very interested. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2129 Seems like just yesterday that you were poking around in that maze. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2130 I promise you we didn't use any of your relatives for these tests. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2131 I hear you are looking for subjects for your vaccine trials. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2132 You're overqualified to be a maze runner. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2133 It's probably your first day. Let me explain a few things. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2134 So, next we address the ANimal TEsting !?! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2135 Now, let's see if we can change you back. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2136 I’m a mouse in a lab coat and even I have never exposed myself at work. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2137 That trial went particularly well, maybe in the future we can get more of you here. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2138 Our research had been going down one blind alley after another. We hope you can help us find our way. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2139 As we’ve always said, even the lowest employee can become the CEO if he works hard enough. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2140 I’m sure that your insider’s expertise will benefit us greatly! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2141 Your vaccine is 100% effective, but the side effects might be an issue. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2142 I think we're ready for a Phase 3 trial. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2143 ooooh, double windsor. Nice! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2144 I understand that you don't like animal testing, Dr. Rat. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2145 Yeah, but it tasted good, right? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2146 Now we truly have an inclusive workplace. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2147 Can’t look me in the eye can you? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2148 I don't think we can reverse it 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2149 You should feel right at home here! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2150 Sir. I agree with your new rule but could we qualify it so it’s only “BIG” lab mice lives that matter? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2151 Wow, you really worked your way up. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2152 Well, we’re not there yet on the vaccine... but we did find the cure for male pattern baldness. 1.2857 0.12529 14 10 4 0
2153 Right now we're trying to figure out why little bits of food keep disappearing from the break room. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2154 You want me to find the cheese? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2155 I'm ashamed to say that it's true. But I didn't know she was your mother. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2156 Well, at least we know that the DNA transfuser works! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2157 Yes, Doctor, we just received a new shipment of "lab humans" to test the spread of COVID in the Mice community." 1.2857 0.12529 14 10 4 0
2158 Yeh, Jim, the early results are promising. But we still don't have any leads on the droppings around the lab. Any thoughts? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2159 The tests show that even a mouse outranks a woman, as long as it is male. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2160 About your aunt and uncle ... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2161 So other than turning me into a rat, the vaccine had no other side effects, right? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2162 Yes, 'A-MAZE-World' is - uh - an amazing name for your dream amusement park. But don't you think pizza, cheese and dark water might be too-limiting for your snack stand menu? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2163 There is a noticeable side effect but at least it cures your Covid-19. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2164 Are you ready to run the maze? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2165 First tests on cats are very encouraging 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2166 I raised your parents. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2167 Sure, just 4 tubes now, but just watch out, these things breed like...uh.....um..... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2168 If it could turn me into a democrat then I'd be all for it..... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2169 John, the test results show that the mouse vaccine works great on humans, except for one small side effect. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2170 I know we were both up for the promotion but you have to let it go, Teresa. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2171 Sure, I guess we could test it on some people too. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2172 So, Dr. Mauci--I hear you'll be the first to try the experimental Covid 19 vaccine. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2173 Can I call you Mickey? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2174 As you suspected, Doctor, the vaccine unfortunately seems to work only in humans who are also dirty rats. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2175 Yes sir, your tests results show a definite change! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2176 I guess this is a first for you, being on this side of the experiment! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2177 This isn't the result we were hoping for, Algernon. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2178 What do you mean, ''my turn?" 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2179 This lab is squeaky clean! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2180 Please provide evidence that you have no family members employed by this company 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2181 I'd call it a dubious success, but for you, it all started here. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2182 Well, if you guarantee that testing is safe, I’ll do I too. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2183 Yes, this certainly does shed a new light on everything! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2184 I hear you're also a maze runner. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2185 ...using mouse DNA has cured your baldness 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2186 Professor Lab Rat I am glad to see that all those years of running through the maze finally paid off. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2187 We're hoping this year's experiment is as groundbreaking as last year's. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2188 These results are excellent, Dr. Hopkins; I think it's time to start testing on humans. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2189 We’re almost finished with human testing and will be ready to begin on mice next week. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2190 Some mixing of species is thought to have occurred. 1.2857 0.16336 14 11 2 1
2191 So I hear you got your start in biomedical research? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2192 Gavin, you were seen racing through the halls and my lunch has gone missing. Anything you'd like to tell me? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2193 Stage 3 trials ? Not just yet, I think." 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2194 The good news is, the vaccine looks promising. The bad news is, we are ready to start a trial with mice. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2195 The FDA won't like this! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2196 I must have gotten the placebo. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2197 Yes, it's true. The chemical formula is NaCHO. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2198 Congratulations! Your promotion encourages me that it's truly possible to overcome systemic bias and rise to the top! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2199 Nice to me you. Finally, we got someone who understands both sides of the testing scenarios. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2200 My mom was a pack rat and my dad was a gym rat, but I just had bigger dream y’know? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2201 I see on your resume that you have extensive lab experience. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2202 No thanks, I already ate. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2203 So, tell me what you have to report, I’m all ears. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2204 I’m flattered, but I’m looking to date more of a GYM rat. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2205 Thank you for the letter of recommendation, Dr. Squeaky. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2206 If there's anything at all that you need, please just ring the bell! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2207 Have Fauci and Trump tested these? Remember the vaccine will have to deal with hi and low IQs. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2208 The good news is that the experiment is a partial success 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2209 Sorry to say, Doctor Rodenti, the sample appears to be Contaminated with Hanta Virus 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2210 I feel good about this; it’s like you were made for this job. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2211 For the last time: NO CATS ARE ALLOWED inside the lab! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2212 You are our very first graduate to return to working here. So, you know the drill. Ill let you set up the maze 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2213 The cheese in the fridge is mine, but I’m open to sharing. 1.2857 0.12529 14 10 4 0
2214 Don't worry. I'm sure you'll learn your way around quickly. This lab is just like a maze. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2215 The good news is you'll be paid in cheese. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2216 Good news--after the third round of testing, Colby is still beating Cheddar and Swiss 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2217 I can see why you asked for an unbiased assistant. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2218 Our clinical trial will be triple-blind. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2219 I know that I'm expected to do the Christmas Decorations, but there's no damn way this year 1.2857 0.16336 14 11 2 1
2220 The new shipment of men will arrive this afternoon 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2221 A breakthrough, Swiss Cheese explained! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2222 If we don't get some results soon, we'll lose our funding. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2223 So, Algernon, some good news and some bad news. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2224 I feel like you’re always testing me. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2225 I’ve been following your progress for years. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2226 We have our work cut out for us. Everyone is looking at us as a Mickey Mouse operation. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2227 You must have worked here a long time. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2228 I guess trying it out on humans would be only fair... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2229 So, do you have any kids that might need a job? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2230 You certainly are a very good listener. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2231 I concur,Dr. Algernon 1.2857 0.12529 14 10 4 0
2232 And there will be a light after dark Someday when we are six feet apart. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2233 The humans have signed waivers and await you in the testing lab! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2234 Thanks for taking the night shift. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2235 I was wondering what happened to the mouse DNA we collected. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2236 Someone's been nibbling on our results. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2237 When they told me I would be working with a lab rat I never expected this..... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2238 Sir, I think I mixed up the cheese samples. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2239 I've replaced all the mice with lab cats as you've instructed. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2240 What an honor! Actually working with a Lab Rat! The parking lot is a real maze, but the periodic snacks along the way really kept me going! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2241 I’m afraid we don’t allow family members to participate in our lab studies. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2242 I understand that you got here on the fast track. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2243 Of course, we'll have to test it on humans first before we start the trials on mice. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2244 The vaccine is effective but has some strange side effects. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2245 I see. So "mousy little girl" is actually a compliment. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2246 You'd be surprised how many applicants misinterpreted the posting seeking experienced rodentia researchers. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2247 Good news! The results of the transmogrification vaccine tests are very encouraging. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2248 Congratulations, you're getting a raise to cheese AND crackers 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2249 Sorry, just because the vaccine worked on your relatives, doesn't mean it's ready for people. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2250 I suppose we could just test the vaccine on humans 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2251 Your mom says hi, 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2252 No I don’t think I can go out with you . You keep looking at me like I’m a piece of cheese. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2253 Thank you Dr. Fauci for being the first to try the COVID vaccine. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2254 We’ve ordered some fleas, which we plan those in all experiments in the future. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2255 My apologies. I requested a doctor researching hair transplants --- not a hare doctor. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2256 I genuinely thought ‘lab rat’ was a term of endearment. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2257 After the lipstick we'll have you try on the new mascara. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2258 With apologies, we're actually interested in a different kind of mouse model. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2259 The CDC has reversed things. I'm in the new clinical trial and you're in charge. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2260 Using lab rats for this drug trial has taken a whole different meaning. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2261 And so, we gave a mouse a cookie... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2262 No, you didn't scare me. I just didn't hear you come in. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2263 We isolated the radioactive compound Toobinium, but unfortunately several colleagues were exposed. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2264 Excuse me, but do you know what a trigger warning is? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2265 Our products are not tested on animals. They’re tested by them. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2266 No more mazes. Anything else? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2267 I'd like to revise the study population for my experiment. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2268 This next step involves something I left out of the job description. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2269 I told the donkey I rode over on to stay outside since the elephants not in the room. Now we can feel free to discuss science. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2270 After you figure out how to turn yourself back into a human, would you mind trying to remove my extra mouth? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2271 Good news. We have been given approval to start testing vaccines on cats! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2272 So, I says to the guy why don't you take a dive.......Ha...ha....huuu 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2273 I know you will feel at home here 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2274 Yes sir, I'm ready o run the maze. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2275 Again, welcome and I think I speak for all of us when I say we're eager to see what other changes you want to make around here. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2276 No, it won't wear off, but I'm sure you could find work at Disneyland 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2277 It has come to my attention that the vial on the counter wasn't for me. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2278 Umm, Professor? It looks like instead of more muscular, our gene editing made you mus musculus 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2279 And I think this year, it’s only fair that I run in the maze. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2280 We're really sorry about your cousin. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2281 Let's change the rewards from pellets to cheese. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2282 I ordered a cheese plate for lunch. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2283 What does it take to go from running mazes to running vaccine trials? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2284 Your mother is the second tube from the left. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2285 Your willingness to test our products on yourself is amazing. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2286 We've gotten approval to start testing on humans now! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2287 I'm glad it worked and you're able to see, but what happened to the other two? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2288 Eight months into the pandemic and everyone’s starting to look like a lab rat. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2289 And who says there aren't benefits to being first in your maze! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2290 Just between us, Micky got the trial vaccine, Minnie got the placebo. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2291 The good news is that we've completed your AncestryDNA testing. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2292 Of course YOU would want to test on hamsters! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2293 Would you like to meet for crackers and cheese after work? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2294 Of course it's safe. Sheesh...are you a man or a mouse? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2295 And we were just wondering if you would be willing to step in for Dr. Fauci when he needs a break. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2296 Janice told me I have funny ears! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2297 The union wants to be fair but ... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2298 Yes, your hearing has improved, but I'm not sure we can market the drug as a less expensive hearing aid. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2299 Early results confirm your thesis - no one can resist cheese. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2300 It's not that I don't trust science. I just don't trust rodents. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2301 Thanks for coming in. Usually, though, our subjects don't come garbed. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2302 The lab never ran this smoothly before Disney bought us out. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2303 We hired you to provide an element of empathy to our studies. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2304 The subject of my last experiment, the co-author of my next. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2305 We can skip most of orientation. You should already know how most things work around here. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2306 With the human trials being a success, we are finally ready to move on to mice! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2307 You’re such a great listener. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2308 Thanks for helping us develop a cheese with universal appeal. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2309 The triple-blind mice trials all came back positive, sir. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2310 You look familiar. Bet you get that a lot here”. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2311 You have to navigate the maze and find the cure before our boss realizes you're close and blocks it off. 1.2857 0.16336 14 11 2 1
2312 So, when's Take Your Kids to Work Day? I think your kids would enjoy the experiments. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2313 I've heard of Dr. Dolittle, but Dr. Stuart Little?! It looks like I'M the one talking to the animals today! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2314 Please don't warm up your cheese in the lab microwaves. Thank you. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2315 How do you still find the time to run mazes? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2316 It's nice to see the cause finding the solution. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2317 No, no, hold your clipboard right-side-up. Make it look like you've held one before. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2318 Any side effects? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2319 No, I don’t live in the subway, Linda. That’s an egregious stereotype. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2320 It looks like the treatments are helping 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2321 Ooh, it looks like someone gets to runs maze today! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2322 I am afraid that I have found a definite bias in your studies, 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2323 Rest assured, we're working around the clock to find a vaccine for a cheese allergy. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2324 I assume you are familiar with the experiment? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2325 We're hoping your small maze experience will translate well to larger mazes. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2326 On the bright side, we’ve been nominated for the Nobel Prize in medicine. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2327 That's not what code switching means, stewart. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2328 So I strongly recommend we change the trial subjects. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2329 Well, at least you're now immune from COVID. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2330 So you discovered the Disney gene! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2331 Good news! The work on longevity is progressing well. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2332 Lab rat. That's funny. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2333 'You say there was an accidental DNA transfer? What makes you think so?' 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2334 Well, empirically speaking, I believe your report shows a cultural bias. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2335 But, I asked for a lab rat. 1.2857 0.16336 14 11 2 1
2336 We have it, Doctor, the secret to running mazes. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2337 In a small company like ours, the opportunities for advancement are virtually unlimited. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2338 The anti-vaxxers are gonna have a field day with this. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2339 I understand there's been some changes made 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2340 I'm sorry you're not eligible to volunteer for the cheese vaccination. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2341 I know I promised this wouldn't happen,but.... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2342 So the maze wasn’t challenging enough for you, huh? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2343 Yes sir. 54% of the cats got tumors from it. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2344 The final vaccine shows marked disinterest in felines towards your species. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2345 A word off caution—don’t get caught in one of those vaccine efficacy traps.” 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2346 Why don't we try it on some humans? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2347 I am sorry I am late. It was a like a maze getting in here. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2348 Here's hoping our new test-tube confined system takes care of the inter-species shifting problem we had before. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2349 Well, someone's a good little maze-runner, isn't he? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2350 I shouldn't have gone on a mouse diet when I was pregnant. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2351 I'll drive you to IKEA for the maze experiment. 1.2857 0.12529 14 10 4 0
2352 But will it work on humans? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2353 The cheese omelet at lunch is to die for. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2354 I would call this experiment a success. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2355 "The maze is set up. Our research supervisor just wanted to confirm you're not experiencing any...uh...conflict of interest." 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2356 Make sure to take your lab coat off before entering the maze, Mr. Müs. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2357 Here's the list of laboratory humans. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2358 Well, since you asked, it's the ears. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2359 I just took a DNA test, turns out I'm 100% that snitch. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2360 I asked for a lab rat. You might be a little overqualified. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2361 Yes, I can see that. But it’s still unethical to experiment on yourself. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2362 The Diversity Committee called. They said we have to employ a pig. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2363 The experiment went great, only 9 humans needed a social media break this time. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2364 To think, 5 years ago you were in the maze, now you're my boss. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2365 This is such an honor. I learned from your father. And your grandfather. And your great-grandfather... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2366 I think it’s best that we start by clarifying the role of “laboratory rat” in this experiment. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2367 Of course, it has only been tested on humans so far.... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2368 Good news. The truth serum is working, and so is your "sexy rat" costume. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2369 I assume you've reviewed our conflict-of-interest policy? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2370 One of us may be experiencing side effects. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2371 If you think it’s an acceptable side effect we can start the clinical trial. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2372 I’m so glad that our philosophical differences hasn’t got in the way of our collaboration. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2373 I know it's tough to swallow, but you did vow to give your life to science. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2374 Maybe next time we can experiment on Dolphins? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2375 You were right. The perfect growth medium for the vaccine is dumpster pizza mixed with used coffee grounds. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2376 The testing using humans is not going well...they are complaining that the maze is too difficult to reach the pizza. They're striking. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2377 Should we try this on my mother-in-law first? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2378 Great news, the cheese shop just called to confirm your 6pm." 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2379 My last job was sequencing cheddar. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2380 So any side effects apart from the sudden craving for cheese? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2381 C’mon. Would I lie about the trials? Roll up your sleeve. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2382 I'll pass on being a research participant this round! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2383 And you say it was a really positive side effect? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2384 Maybe we should use test animals first. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2385 We feel additional oversight of the lab may be required. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2386 OK doc are you ready to see Mrs Cats? 1.2857 0.16336 14 11 2 1
2387 I can't believe I didn't think of the sideffects. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2388 Your turn! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2389 Have you seen any of the escaped lab rats? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2390 Mice trials will start after we finish the human trials 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2391 Doctor, you ever see the movie ‘The Fly’? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2392 You'd be perfect for the test group! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2393 On behalf of the Uiversity I'd like to thank you for your contribution to this project. Your sperm donation supplied our labs mice with the optimal genetics for testing household poisons on our "mousers" . 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2394 Fermented cheese shooters! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2395 The chemical analysis of the cheddar sample should be ready in a couple of hours. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2396 PETA is throwing sand in our wheels. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2397 Unfortunately, there appear to be some side effects... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2398 It worked on humans. Now we'll have to see if it works on mice. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2399 The vaccine has no significant side effects 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2400 They'll want to know if you'll be using rodents in your work. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2401 It’s an honor to work with a leading scientist in the field 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2402 Since you started working here we no longer test on animals 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2403 Great news! So basically, our new vaccine worked and you are immune. But you say you now have mouse ears? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2404 I’ve really enjoyed our dates, but maybe we can try something non-maze-related next time? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2405 Thanks for helping out, I can never decide if which of these cheddars is best for cauliflower cheese! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2406 Doctor, perhaps you're too empathetic with first-trial vaccine subjects 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2407 Oh, and by the way George, congratulations on the promotion. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2408 Thanks, Jim. Why don’t you give these to your friends and then let me know what they think. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2409 I am glad to see you rose above the maze and made something of yourself. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2410 Eeeeeek! A mouse! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2411 Vaccination testing trial gone wrong. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2412 One of our genetically engineered mice has escaped 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2413 What did you mean by I'm going to be your lab rat? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2414 'Okay, so there's a side effect. But it did cure that dry cough.' 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2415 I knew it would be beneficial if we built a better mouse trap. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2416 We were hoping you would give us some insight into rodent auditory perception. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2417 Hello Doctor, do you prefer referring to them as lab rats or experiment participants? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2418 I’m not sure your the best person to review my experiment. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2419 That last test drug had amazing results. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2420 I really want to meet the person who came up with this maze test. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2421 Doctor, they're waiting for you in the Hearing Impairment Workshop down the hall. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2422 I've read your book, 'Of Mice and Mazes'. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2423 Thanks for asking, but I'm waiting for our tailless generation. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2424 O.K. if I call you “Lab Rat”? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2425 The tests came back positive, Doctor: you're definitely a large mouse in a lab coat. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2426 I'm really a big fan of your son's music, Dr. Deadmau5. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2427 I'm so happy we're finally promoting from within! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2428 The placebos were clearly marked, sir. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2429 I'm still trying to decide if this was a good or bad side effect! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2430 I'm flattered, Frank, but I'm worried dating my supervisor would kill any chance I have at a promotion around here. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2431 I understand fair play but would prefer not to be one of your first in the new trial." Paul M. Wert Spokane, Wa 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2432 You'll fit right in! Mice have been working here for decades. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2433 I've got to admit it, you make animal testing fun again. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2434 Welcome to the team. Looks like you've found your way around pretty quickly. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2435 Doctor, I'm happy to tell you that we've discovered a cure for the cancer we used to kill all of your aunts and uncles. 1.2857 0.16336 14 11 2 1
2436 Well, this takes us in a whole new direction. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2437 ‘Good morning, sir.And how are you responding to the Covid-19 vaccine trials?’ 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2438 Nothing to report in the control group. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2439 To tell the truth , this is taking diversity a little too far. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2440 The cat is going to hate this... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2441 Good afternoon Professor, glad you found us through the maze! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2442 So these are the Operation Warp Speed vaccines...lets test it on the cats. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2443 If they won't vote once every four years, what makes you think they'll press the lever for food three times a day? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2444 Is it true you started as a test subject? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2445 Dr. Spillman, yes of course, I took the formula too, yeah, uhm, but I just didn't get the same results as you. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2446 One of the maze runners came with a white tie instead of black. I assume OK? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2447 I’d expect you feel right at home here! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2448 I’m embarrassed to ask, but, have you done any modeling? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2449 I’m relieved that you being both my lab subject and my boss hasn’t created a conflict of interest.” 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2450 You work your way to the top from that maze didn’t you? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2451 It’s 2020 sis, new drugs are tested on you 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2452 We should talk about phase two of the experiment. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2453 We’re trying to avoid epistemological issues, like conflict of interest and subject-object identification. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2454 Well, the results are in but they've muddled up the name, What is your given name Mr. Dent? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2455 i was told you needed me for some experiments 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2456 Dr Roe! Didn't you say, we could use your family to experiment on 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2457 This is our best couples costume yet, and we always slay the costume contest. Every year! That’s probably why all of our friends call us the Costume Couple, even though you just know Julio and Gretchen want to be called the Costume Couple. Remember that year when they went as Ted Danson and Mary Steenburgen but like they were versions of them from totally different eras and no one knew who they were supposed to be? Ha! Classic. But no they’re cool I know you don’t like when I talk about your friends like they are trying to outdo us. Anyways what’s your afternoon like, wanna hit the maze? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2458 Glad to have you back in this lab, Doc. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2459 You know you're not fooling anyone with that lab coat, Dave? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2460 Your son has been asking about you......it’s time, Frank 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2461 We proud ourselves in our high success rates working with lab mice! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2462 I’m a huge fan of your work in both research and testing, Dr. Mousely. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2463 It is always better to hear the results firsthand than from a test tube 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2464 They told me you were the go-to fella for all things lab. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2465 So let's get this experiment starting! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2466 So, what do you think? Do you want to try it next? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2467 As if they ratted on us... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2468 The good news is that I'll let you be first author on the paper 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2469 It’s an honor. Your maze work is why I went into this field. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2470 ...left, left, right, left button hook, then right again. It should have been right in front of me. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2471 We made the COVID-19 vaccine protocol public, what more do you need to know? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2472 Never mind the results. We’ll just go with our gut feeling on this one. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2473 Wait, what are you doing here? I thought you were the test subject, 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2474 I’d call you a lab rat, but that’s not mice 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2475 Dr. At? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2476 We are pleased to have someone with your experience join the team 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2477 Miss Roberts, I can assure you my DNA is not worthy of this Mickey Mouse experiment! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2478 I’m so pleased with the results of the new Covid-19 vaccine 1.2857 0.16336 14 11 2 1
2479 The vaccine will be tested on mice first.. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2480 Should we start testing with one of yours or one of mine? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2481 I'm sorry. What did you say? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2482 Well, at least our request for external scale-up support was taken seriously 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2483 Rats, they want this done by November 3rd! 1.2857 0.12529 14 10 4 0
2484 ‘Tom, so nice to meet you. I’m Geri’ 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2485 How many of us survived your lab test? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2486 It worked, doctor. Now we can turn anything into cheese 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2487 The Green Mile alternate ending: Mr. Jingles lives on to become a Nobel Prize winning scientist 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2488 ´just think of the exposure and experience you will get! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2489 I like your costume, Larry. Larry? Larry? Why are you squeaking like that? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2490 It’s the blind leading the blind in there. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2491 brave new in vivo world, wouldn’t you say doctor? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2492 So the good news is the the Russian conspiracy that the vaccine turns you into a monkey is false. The bad news… 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2493 Yes, you’re correct. The ad stated ‘only serious lab rats need apply’. Let’s begin! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2494 Well you ought to know! You’re the expert 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2495 Please tell me we got the funding, I cannot test myself again 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2496 The remarkable progress you have made since coming to work in the lab is nothing short of...a-maze-Ing. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2497 Yes Sir, we’ve successfully isolated the gene for mouse catching 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2498 Does that mean you’ll approve the next round of testing on cats? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2499 Have you seen The Fly? Well, it’s like “The Fly...but with a mouse. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2500 So what did you think of the Planet of the Apes? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2501 We just can't imagine how we used computers before you arrived 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2502 Funny you mentioned that your cousins live in the basement. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2503 Glad you made it in, this place is a bit of a maze 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2504 Right... so for your first assignment, this might be a bit awkward... 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2505 Well Greg, we have all been impressed by your many years of experience. It just really shows 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2506 Who would have thought a woman could become a scientist? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2507 My God, it worked! 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2508 No, you a-maze me! 1.2857 0.15430 7 6 1 0
2509 Ok, lets see what you can teach me today. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2510 Actually, Jane, the new preferred term is 'murine laboratory technician' 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2511 No doctor, those glasses don't make your ears look big. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2512 I've got the human testers all prepped for the trials. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2513 The results will soon show us whether you’re a man or a mouse. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2514 One each 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2515 Well it made your species more aware, I think it’s about time we tried it. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2516 As you can see, I’m the clearest sign yet that you shouldn’t test on animals. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2517 You’re proof that science education is effective. If only the government would stop blocking our human trials. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2518 Are you sure that was the only side effect? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2519 yes I've read flowers for algernon, why ever do you ask? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2520 I am sorry but this is not a job interview, This advertisement was for volunteers for clinical trails" 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2521 I’m glad we finally have a trial level between ‘mouse’ and ‘human’ 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2522 I really appreciate that you don't experiment on humans. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2523 Good news Harold, only nine cats died this time. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2524 Yeah, I got out. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2525 They are blaming bats for this plague. Mission accomplished. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2526 Sometimes I get the feeling I wasn’t hired for my intellect. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2527 Human traps have been set, like you asked! Results awaited. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2528 I understand that is how they do it at Disney but that isn’t how we do it here. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2529 That was actually a graphic novel written by a human. It anthropomorphized mice in order to make a point about human cruelty, but at this point in history, I can see where there might be some confusion. 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2530 What do you mean I'm next? 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
2531 Have you yesterday's results yet, Algernon? 1.2778 0.10863 18 13 5 0
2532 Working here has always felt like I'm a mouse in a maze, to be honest. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2533 Doctor, as the very first volunteer, you are living proof that we are now ready to enter Phase Three. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2534 Have you seen a speech therapist about that periodic squeak, doctor ? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2535 A maze? Sure, sounds fun. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2536 Yeah, things are pretty laid back around here. I wouldn't call it a rat race. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2537 Well, I have always thought of myself as a real lab rat 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2538 I read your "The Effects of dynamite cigars and falling pianos on felines" and I had a few questions. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2539 Yes, I can confirm this one is definitely LSD 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2540 No, next week's out. How about next year --- is next year good for you? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2541 I assume you'll be overseeing the animal testing of the vaccine? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2542 Jeffrey Toobin took out his dick on a Zoom call. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2543 Why yes, I'm here because of STEM outreach too. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2544 My last lab partner was a cute bunny. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2545 Umm, because mice deserve the most advanced treatment. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2546 My secret to hiding the ears? Bobby pins and long hair. Nobody has ever guessed. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2547 To be really sure we should test it on...., nevermind. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2548 What do you want to do tomorrow, Pinky? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2549 Wow! I'm impressed that you found the lab on your own. It can be like a maze around here. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2550 Have you been snacking on the lab chow again Errol? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2551 Impressive, but the cheese is next door. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2552 Don't forget about Take Your Child to Work day, dr. Rat! The lab can't wait to see the little ones. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2553 You seem a little overqualified for the job. A PhD in maze running, was it? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2554 Obviously the white mice growth hormone is a success 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2555 I have already taken the secret elixer we have been working on for months. By tomorrow morning I should also be a giant mouse, and finally we can be married! 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2556 You'll be perfect to run this field test. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2557 Shape of Cheese 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2558 I can't wait to see the results of our next experiment! 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2559 No, Dear. I said a hair's breadth. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2560 Yes, Yes! Now we can film, "The Mouse!" 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2561 Yes, your work is excellent, but the staff thinks you have outgrown your position 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2562 I really hate to tell you this, but your vaccine has funny side effects.” Don Dechman. Austin T 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2563 Mr Rabbit Dr Fauci said your vaccine is ready 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2564 How inspiring that you worked your way up from being vermin behind the dumpster. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2565 I'm disappointed too, but at least you are not a fly. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2566 Well, the mice didn't have any side effects. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2567 It's not you, I'm just not into office romance. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2568 I told you and I told you, we don't practice self-experimentation anymore. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2569 Congratulations on being the only survivor from our internship program! 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2570 Dr. R? How's your paper on side effects progressing? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2571 Oh, so you'll be taking a different role in the experiment today? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2572 The human tests were a success and we are on track to start rodent trials later this month. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2573 I'm so grateful for the MouseLab diversity program. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2574 We're really going to need your help today. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2575 No worries, the vaccine has proved completely safe in our tests on humans. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2576 Of course we'll test it on cats first 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2577 The test results are in and I smell a rat. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2578 Dr. Mouski, let’s do the second return to normal trial today. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2579 Well, then there must be a tiny human headed mouse somewhere out there. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2580 Eeny, meeny, miney, doc mouse just pick one, it's all the same vaccine 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2581 You may want to rethink 'Take-the-Little-Ones-to-Work Day'. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2582 I feel like I need to tell you about your test subjects. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2583 "It may work on mice, but we need something that works on humans." 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2584 I'm excited to be working with a legend in the field. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2585 obviously, you didn’t get the placebo. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2586 Yes, normally we do test it on rats but I guess we could try it on redheads. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2587 If all goes well, my ears will sprout -- and we'll be married today! 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2588 Well, now we know who was in the control group. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2589 Our findings show that the Cheddar is particularly effective. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2590 No hard feelings I hope. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2591 Now that you have a research lab you are going to want some postdocs 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2592 What a coincidence, I'm lactose intolerant too! 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2593 Traffic is heavy in the maze - your pals will be 10 minutes late. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2594 Congratulations. You’ve succeeded at every test and you’ve just been promoted to my supervisor. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2595 We think this study will be totally in your wheelhouse. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2596 Looks like those fat-cats turned us down for funding again. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2597 No sir, I don’t believe P.E.T.A will have any objections with our experiment. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2598 Your granduncle Algernon has contributed greatly in our research 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2599 Humans are ready for the experiment. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2600 ‘Spite all my rage, i am still just a rat in a ... 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2601 I just wanted you to know that I always thought of you as Walter. Not, ‘Walter the lab rat’. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2602 I’ll tell the president you’ve found the vaccine. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2603 Sorry I’m late. Traffic was a maze. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2604 Hey Stuart, how are you? Well you’re not as little as the last time I saw you. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2605 Thank you for coming in today. You don’t know how hard it’s been to get people lately. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2606 I think it’s time we come clean about the affair, Lisa 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2607 I guess our experiment got out of hand... 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2608 Thank you, but I never date co-workers. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2609 And you’re 100% sure there are no side effects..? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2610 The vaccine works quickly but there do seem to be some side effects. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2611 I have to ask, what made you pivot from behavioral science to genetic engineering? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2612 I'm a total gym rat too. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2613 I do believe you are over qualified for the position. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
2614 I see you did your fellowship as a subject and are now chief of studies. Very impressive. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2615 I can't believe this whole time I was the lab ra- I mean test subject! 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
2616 We’re taking the old maze test up to a new level. 1.2667 0.11819 15 11 4 0
2617 I think it is safe to say that this batch of vaccines are a no-go. 1.2667 0.15327 15 12 2 1
2618 Hi, yes Mr.Trump will see you next for advice on coronavirus. 1.2667 0.11819 15 11 4 0
2619 I’m a transplant, where you born and raised here!? 1.2667 0.11819 15 11 4 0
2620 That's fine. But first I need you to run around all the lab tables. 1.2632 0.12892 19 15 3 1
2621 You say this batch is cheesy. You mean full of holes sir. Thelma Fields Antioch, Calif. 1.2500 0.28868 4 3 1 0
2622 "Before you start, a totally casual question. Exactly how long did it take you to find your way from HR? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2623 Has anyone ever said you remind them of Hey Arthur? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2624 Professor, the data implies we’re all a part of an evil medical experiment. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2625 the vaccine is gonna be tried in humans before, just in case 1.2500 0.13056 12 9 3 0
2626 Let me just say it is an honour to continue our collaboration. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2627 Let's build a better man-trap. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2628 How do you feel about testing on mice? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2629 Algernon, I barely recognized you! 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2630 I meant to say we're testing the vaccine on rodents who identify as little people. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2631 I'm glad someone responded to the flyer for cheese taste-testing. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2632 How do I know it’s effective? Ok so this is awkward... 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2633 Things can backfire when you gauge your ears in a lab. 1.2500 0.13056 12 9 3 0
2634 We think it's time you stepped back from lab work. 1.2500 0.28868 4 3 1 0
2635 Did you try that shampoo I gave you last night? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2636 Really, I fear that your hypothesis is not even false? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2637 You're sure you don't mind that we tortured your family? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2638 And you think cheese is the cure? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2639 I always get lost- can you show me how to get to the cafeteria? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2640 Gosh, I’ve never met a Rodent Scholar. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2641 No, professor, I do not intend to use mice in our laboratory experiments. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2642 Good news, we've had a breakthrough in the quantum mechanics lab. Bad news, the cat is most definitely alive. 1.2500 0.13056 12 9 3 0
2643 But sir, this program is clearly eugenics." "One more outburst and you're going in the syringe. 1.2500 0.13056 12 9 3 0
2644 And since you're last audit, I've only been experimenting on my immediately family over Thanksgiving. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2645 Guess what? I've applied for a grant that pays in cheese. 1.2500 0.13056 12 9 3 0
2646 Just how does one go about making cheese cheesier? 1.2500 0.11180 16 12 4 0
2647 I thought it was just your avatar for videocalls 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2648 I have the same pair at home but normally wear my contacts to work. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2649 People call me mousy too. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2650 Did you find the lab O.K.? I know it’s like a maze trying to get here. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2651 And the student becomes the teacher. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2652 The second dose group is pretty sick, but they'll take the booster for a $5 Starbucks card and an autographed pink sweater from Bill Gates. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2653 Call it a hunch, but you're not got going to like what we've got going on in the testing room. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2654 You were right, turns out the leading cause of cancer in lab rats is in fact research scientists. 1.2500 0.28868 4 3 1 0
2655 It's good to see they are taking Biodiversity in STEM seriously 1.2500 0.28868 4 3 1 0
2656 It wouldn't work out, my fursona is a cheetah. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2657 Oh doctor, congratulations on your meteoric rise from test subject to department head! 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2658 Hello, sir. I'm your new research test subject. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2659 That's right, Laurie, the cure for Elephantiasis has been inside of me all along. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2660 The experiment was successful, Smedley. Your appearance now matches your character. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2661 I'm very impressed on how you've worked your way up through the ranks. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2662 It seems to be working, although a few samples are missing. 1.2500 0.28868 4 3 1 0
2663 Well, thank you. I don't think you're mousy either. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2664 We hired you because you totally redefined what it means to be a laboratory mouse 1.2500 0.28868 4 3 1 0
2665 Mice to neet you! 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2666 So... good news, bad news on your test results... 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2667 I think you'll enjoy working with our subjects. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2668 The experiment worked perfectly. Now, when will I turn back into a mouse? 1.2500 0.13056 12 9 3 0
2669 We appreciate your participation. Unfortunately, it appears that the President was inaccurate in his statement that the vaccine had no side visable side effects. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2670 I Promise, I had nothing to do with experiments on your Parents... 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2671 Is that a Halloween costume, or have you been fiddling around in the CRISPR lab again? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2672 Have you sampled my cheese plate in the breakroom? 1.2500 0.13056 12 9 3 0
2673 Can you hear me? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2674 The next test is where we'll see how you convince our supervisor that we deserve that promotion. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2675 Between you and I, sir, I think there is indeed systemic racism against white mice. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2676 The lunch room? Two lefts, a right, another two lefts, up the ramp and across the bridge. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2677 Professor, I really enjoyed your paper on solving mazes. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2678 No, when I say I don't see species I really mean it. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2679 I’m afraid you can’t have your dick out on Zoom calls, Mr. Toobin. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
2680 Before I say "yes" to going out with you, I need to know: are you a mouse, or a man? 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0