Contest #722


Cartoon

722

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “The piano's in tune, but the house is a little flat.”
  2. “'Amazon drone delivery,' you said. 'It’s so convenient,' you said.”
  3. “In 2019, I would have been both confused and alarmed by this.”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2020-08-31T00:05:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2020-09-14T00:05:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2020-09-08T00:05:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued September 14, 2020
Number of captions 9882
Number of responses 1490136
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 This is the only house I could find under a grand. 2.1621 0.00623 17400 4800 5029 7571
1 I don't know who was playing it, but he brought the House Down. 2.0893 0.02054 1455 387 551 517
2 You were right. We should have requested a fiddler on the roof. 1.9392 0.00689 14396 5431 4430 4535
3 The piano's in tune, but the house is a little flat. 1.9148 0.00784 10732 4102 3467 3163
4 Amazon drone delivery,” you said. “It’s so convenient,” you said. 1.8818 0.00800 10605 4328 3212 3065
5 They said it was a fixer-upper and they would throw in the piano. 1.8631 0.00754 10972 4319 3857 2796
6 This is not what I meant when I said we’d buy the house if they’d drop a grand. 1.8615 0.00812 9709 3913 3243 2553
7 In 2019, I would have been both confused and alarmed by this. 1.8577 0.00803 10574 4478 3129 2967
8 I thought the damage would B minor 1.8420 0.00854 8767 3622 2915 2230
9 Insurance will say this was orchestrated. 1.8351 0.01139 4700 1885 1706 1109
10 You're right, it doesn't fit. 1.8311 0.00812 9390 3874 3245 2271
11 I guess cloud storage isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. 1.8227 0.00903 8035 3502 2469 2064
12 Now the house has 88 keys and no locks 1.8187 0.01588 2366 959 877 530
13 We should probably leave before the bench arrives. 1.8152 0.00764 10622 4512 3582 2528
14 You know they’re going to find a way to blame this on Obama.” 1.8068 0.01025 6409 2904 1842 1663
15 Well, that really brought the house down. 1.7832 0.01169 4414 1914 1543 957
16 On the bright side, we'll probably get to be in a Farmers Insurance commercial. 1.7818 0.01030 5806 2576 1930 1300
17 You're right, it does make the living room look smaller. 1.7814 0.01053 5256 2255 1905 1096
18 How specific were you when you asked your ex for his keys back? 1.7741 0.00910 7232 3193 2490 1549
19 Wreckmaninoff. 1.7708 0.01646 2256 1007 759 490
20 I guess this is what they meant when they told us that delivery would be on the house. 1.7695 0.01282 3518 1516 1297 705
21 And that’s when she said, “It’s my way or the Steinway!” 1.7573 0.00968 6382 2907 2132 1343
22 I HATE when this happens. 1.7548 0.01043 6663 3453 1399 1811
23 How much you wanna bet we’re only covered for woodwinds? 1.7462 0.01280 3664 1683 1228 753
24 Inexplicable for sure. Where’s the bench?? 1.7396 0.01183 4916 2498 1200 1218
25 You can still get something under a grand in this neighborhood. 1.7311 0.00945 6295 2863 2270 1162
26 Now I see why they named the storm 'Liberace.' 1.7300 0.01091 5348 2655 1497 1196
27 I was just trying to download some music. 1.7221 0.01236 3750 1740 1312 698
28 The worst part is, this isn't the strangest thing that's happened this year. 1.7175 0.01471 2662 1249 916 497
29 Wow. So that’s what the middle pedal does. 1.7124 0.01267 3874 1936 1122 816
30 2020 just doesn’t give up, does it? 1.7111 0.01194 4250 2079 1320 851
31 At least it ended on a high note. 1.7071 0.02392 949 437 353 159
32 Looks like someone had a score to settle. 1.6951 0.01019 5316 2558 1834 924
33 Remember the good old days when it only rained cats and dogs? 1.6918 0.01778 1674 780 630 264
34 Shot down as a UFO ?? Idiots !! Obviously it’s a piano. 1.6910 0.01279 4401 2474 813 1114
35 I mean, why WOULDN’t this happen to us? 1.6899 0.01086 5686 3082 1293 1311
36 Let's list it as a fixer-upper with grand views from every room. 1.6852 0.01256 3606 1771 1199 636
37 Maybe two day delivery by air wasn’t the best choice. 1.6764 0.01220 3767 1862 1262 643
38 AND they got the wrong address. 1.6614 0.01284 3414 1742 1089 583
39 Now that's what I call a dramatic final movement. 1.6475 0.01179 4253 2287 1185 781
40 It’s going to disappear. One day, it’s like a miracle, it will disappear.” 1.6389 0.01589 2398 1315 634 449
41 That one sure brought the house down. 1.6354 0.01046 4825 2490 1611 724
42 I thought it was “pennies from heaven” not “pianos” 1.6327 0.01211 4174 2350 1017 807
43 I think it works better when the band smashes their guitars. 1.6309 0.01227 3747 2020 1097 630
44 Making America Grand Again 1.6296 0.01741 1914 1041 541 332
45 Stop saying it can't get worse. 1.6254 0.01234 3657 1965 1099 593
46 Don’t go in yet, I also prayed for a grandfather clock. 1.6190 0.02470 903 486 275 142
47 I just hope there isn't an encore. 1.6162 0.02130 1170 621 377 172
48 I see your ex returned the piano. 1.6086 0.01181 3720 1978 1220 522
49 Is “crashendo” a word? 1.6085 0.01978 1387 754 422 211
50 Gives a whole new meaning to B Flat. 1.6068 0.01799 1577 834 529 214
51 Amazing how easy it is to drop a grand these days. 1.6029 0.01394 2720 1475 851 394
52 Those damn magic beans. 1.6023 0.01031 6083 3670 1167 1246
53 You’re not seeing the potential. 1.6021 0.01250 3878 2259 905 714
54 It looked smaller when I ordered it online. 1.6000 0.01135 3745 1966 1317 462
55 Amazon's drone delivery still has some kinks. 1.5925 0.01105 4213 2305 1325 583
56 He wasn’t kidding when he said, “It’s my way or the Steinway.” 1.5907 0.01093 4461 2485 1321 655
57 We'll need a new house, but we can salvage the keys. 1.5893 0.01228 3891 2278 937 676
58 Stay back, that was Mozart's concerto for TWO pianos! 1.5873 0.01765 1856 1080 463 313
59 I realize now, 'Free Drop Shipping on Discontinued Items' should have been a red flag. 1.5867 0.02060 1263 707 371 185
60 I think they call that a grand slam. 1.5834 0.01583 2122 1190 626 306
61 It looks like all those Liberace jokes finally caught up with Marty. 1.5787 0.01275 3703 2253 769 681
62 It's the "2020 Overture" 1.5780 0.02346 1007 581 270 156
63 Next year, maybe you should ask Santa for a harmonica. 1.5721 0.02095 1131 626 363 142
64 I forgot there was a piano in the Book of Revelation. 1.5718 0.01364 3246 1997 652 597
65 Well, I think that finishes my COVID-19 Bingo card. 1.5669 0.02329 1039 615 259 165
66 So, you were right, we don't have the space for a grand piano 1.5660 0.02015 1212 675 388 149
67 Man,woman,tree,house, piano. 1.5652 0.01717 2026 1237 433 356
68 Looks like we’re in the key of F’d 1.5630 0.01571 2222 1307 579 336
69 They told me one performance would bring down the house. 1.5616 0.02097 1056 578 363 115
70 Fine, you take the house, I'll take the cottage. 1.5578 0.01446 2917 1832 548 537
71 He was playing the last few bars of 'Stairway to Paradise' when all hell broke loose. 1.5554 0.01441 2886 1806 563 517
72 Maybe God is done with the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. 1.5536 0.01481 2769 1752 508 509
73 I feel like we're in a New Yorker cartoon 1.5528 0.03061 559 327 155 77
74 Man, Woman, House, Piano, Magazine. 1.5521 0.03176 547 328 136 83
75 Now that's what I call a sforzando. 1.5517 0.01517 2630 1657 498 475
76 Yes, at her last concert, she brought down the house 1.5496 0.01430 2522 1481 699 342
77 Hurricane Liberace, tearing through the Keys. 1.5493 0.02181 1076 627 307 142
78 Yup. My mind IRL after 10 minutes of watching the RNC 1.5484 0.01592 2502 1621 393 488
79 I thought things like that only happened in cartoons. 1.5484 0.01522 2316 1398 573 345
80 Maybe it was just me, but I could have sworn I heard Bach 1.5462 0.01596 2411 1555 403 453
81 You always knew that music dominated my life! 1.5442 0.01644 2286 1477 379 430
82 Damn. Our insurance only covers uprights. 1.5437 0.02171 1030 592 316 122
83 It’s Gershwin’s less well known Rhapsody in out of the Blue. 1.5425 0.01608 2070 1244 529 297
84 I was expecting famine or rivers turning to blood, but this works too. 1.5422 0.02295 913 524 283 106
85 Of course it’s Obama’s fault; gravity is a total hoax! 1.5420 0.01720 1845 1122 447 276
86 Now that's how you Liszt a house. 1.5407 0.01696 1855 1116 475 264
87 'Free jazz' really doesn't mean what I thought it did. 1.5406 0.01715 2181 1433 318 430
88 It certainly brought the house down. 1.5396 0.01533 2044 1185 618 241
89 It’s so in tune with the times. 1.5396 0.02977 543 313 167 63
90 Will you support my music career now, Dad? 1.5383 0.01726 2088 1371 317 400
91 Huh . . . and all this time I was waiting for the other shoe. 1.5381 0.01790 1563 924 439 200
92 You played with my gamma laser, did you? 1.5378 0.01738 2101 1389 299 413
93 Looks like the Father" thinks the Son should stick to carpentry. 1.5349 0.01782 2047 1387 235 425
94 The realtor failed to mention that the house had a roadrunner problem. 1.5348 0.01803 1984 1321 267 396
95 I still think we should try turning it the other way. 1.5335 0.01658 1837 1092 510 235
96 When I was singing “Rock Me Amadeus” I wasn’t asking for this. 1.5332 0.01806 1986 1333 251 402
97 You know what? This is JUST fine 1.5308 0.01854 1897 1287 219 391
98 In a way...it’s both major and minor damage. 1.5278 0.01810 1423 836 427 160
99 Evgeny Kissin meets Donnie Darko. 1.5273 0.01901 1798 1225 204 369
100 That must have been quite a leaky toilet on that airplane! 1.5264 0.01942 1763 1211 180 372
101 So much for your rooftop piano bar idea. 1.5260 0.02027 1192 708 341 143
102 I told you it wouldn't fit. 1.5233 0.01702 1569 926 472 171
103 Every night bitching about the giraffe! So I guess you're happy now. I've got news . I'm moving back. Good luck. 1.5231 0.01995 1690 1168 162 360
104 If it ain't Baroque, don't fix it. 1.5205 0.03229 488 297 128 63
105 Told you his performance would bring down the house... 1.5190 0.01770 1555 935 434 186
106 For sale. Under a grand. 1.5178 0.02646 703 424 194 85
107 Perhaps a little to the left? 1.5164 0.04687 213 126 64 23
108 I wonder where the rest of the orchestra landed? 1.5151 0.02724 629 373 188 68
109 We have two wishes left. We can fix this. 1.5144 0.02106 1112 685 286 141
110 This isn't what I had in mind when I said "drop the keys by the door." 1.5130 0.01874 1425 875 370 180
111 The ill-tempered clavier 1.5124 0.02495 849 532 199 118
112 This might be the eighth or ninth most weird thing I've seen this year. 1.5120 0.03055 500 298 148 54
113 I thought they all played harps up there. 1.5119 0.01917 1303 790 361 152
114 I guess this week’s piano lesson is on the house. 1.5093 0.01917 1345 824 357 164
115 I told you... downloading music is never safe 1.5084 0.01962 1249 758 347 144
116 Who knew she was a witch? 1.5079 0.02100 1323 874 227 222
117 On second thought, maybe we should have gotten the baby grand. 1.5075 0.01815 1267 730 431 106
118 We. Are. Farmers. Bum bum bum bum bum bum buuuuum 1.5057 0.02046 1228 769 297 162
119 If it wasn't 2020, I'd consider this odd. 1.5056 0.01989 1250 773 323 154
120 looks a little bigger than the picture online... 1.5053 0.05048 190 116 52 22
121 Well, that ended on a low note. 1.5032 0.01950 1240 753 350 137
122 Well , that certainly brought down the house.... 1.5008 0.02024 1190 735 314 141
123 I think we made a big mistake having it delivered by drone. 1.5000 0.02879 514 302 167 45
124 In any other year, this would seem ridiculous. 1.5000 0.02008 1176 735 303 138
125 What's a Stein weigh? 1.4991 0.02134 1106 694 272 140
126 Okay, no more jokes about how this year can't get any worse. 1.4988 0.02310 846 509 252 85
127 They're cute when they're babies, but then they grow up. 1.4986 0.02132 1097 686 275 136
128 Now we know where the Flight of the Bumblebees ends. 1.4973 0.02161 1132 744 220 168
129 His offer was good, but he could only put down a grand. 1.4964 0.01967 1122 713 291 118
130 Well you were right. The living room isn't big enough for a piano. 1.4945 0.02085 1096 678 294 124
131 He said if I’d buy two pianos I’d get a third one on the house. 1.4930 0.02157 996 610 279 106
132 Hey, did you turn the stove off? 1.4917 0.03093 480 294 136 50
133 I am neither a musician or cartoonist, but I would say that there is something wrong with the scale. 1.4916 0.02395 834 519 220 95
134 Well,...you were right. It’s too big for the living room. 1.4892 0.02117 1014 624 285 105
135 My house b flat 1.4871 0.02278 971 621 227 123
136 Well isn't this grand? 1.4871 0.03288 427 264 118 45
137 I should have been more specific when I asked our realtor to drop off all the keys. 1.4864 0.02192 956 591 265 100
138 Should we file the insurance claim under major or minor incident? 1.4845 0.02308 933 596 222 115
139 Now I wish we had opted for ground delivery. 1.4838 0.02135 926 565 277 84
140 We'll take it, what are the chances of that happening again? 1.4830 0.02241 942 592 245 105
141 You should see next door; they got the entire percussion section. 1.4821 0.02371 865 550 213 102
142 That cloud looks like a duck 1.4814 0.02497 916 632 131 153
143 I see it’s still 2020 1.4810 0.02308 894 570 220 104
144 I'm impressed, it took only one grand for that demolition job. 1.4807 0.02301 909 577 227 105
145 Again? 1.4805 0.02381 872 565 199 108
146 No, if it was an "Act of God", it would be a Steinway. 1.4781 0.03704 366 237 83 46
147 Well, the realtor did say that they were dropping off the keys today.” 1.4751 0.02260 844 522 244 78
148 Well now. This is disconcerting. 1.4746 0.02427 769 482 209 78
149 He said he'd leave the keys by the front door. 1.4745 0.02418 824 531 196 97
150 We can’t let one failed launch kill the Juilliard Space Program.” 1.4745 0.02413 822 526 202 94
151 Delivery by drone isn't working out that well, is it? 1.4737 0.02341 836 527 222 87
152 Is this what the realtor meant when she said she would drop off a full set of keys? 1.4731 0.02324 835 524 227 84
153 FINALLY! Something that my insurance will actually cover. 1.4728 0.02458 810 524 189 97
154 Looks like we have A-minor problem. 1.4727 0.02335 806 504 224 78
155 That's enough, 2020. You win. 1.4710 0.02474 775 497 191 87
156 I always wondered what 'drop shipped' meant. 1.4699 0.02416 764 480 209 75
157 Did you remember to leave a review for the delivery guys? 1.4699 0.02380 764 475 219 70
158 The day the music died. And the Smiths. 1.4688 0.02661 689 448 159 82
159 There wasn't a note? 1.4681 0.02508 752 484 184 84
160 Did we already try it lengthwise? 1.4678 0.02534 761 496 174 91
161 I asked you not to leave the new 3-D printer on while we took our walk. 1.4668 0.02510 754 487 182 85
162 I thought it was sketchy when they said the house was under a grand. 1.4662 0.02524 725 464 184 77
163 You know what the weirdest part is? I don't even remember ordering a piano. 1.4662 0.02666 650 416 165 69
164 Well, I guess we ran out of Cloud storage. 1.4660 0.02529 749 486 177 86
165 That's what happens when there's music in the air. 1.4658 0.02532 745 483 177 85
166 Luckily it was a Baby Grand. 1.4647 0.02372 751 467 219 65
167 Talk about a grand finale... 1.4643 0.02478 728 462 194 72
168 Look, when it's tornado season in Oklahoma, you keep your Steinway in the basement. Everybody knows that. 1.4630 0.02504 702 444 191 67
169 Well, look on the bright side. That spider is definitely dead. 1.4614 0.02612 674 434 169 71
170 Damn you, Hurricane Liberace! 1.4602 0.02682 704 473 139 92
171 That's what happens when you defund the arts. 1.4594 0.02752 616 400 149 67
172 That’s still the second worst thing to happen today. 1.4593 0.02506 688 435 190 63
173 When you said it was “on the house” I thought you meant it was free!!!! 1.4590 0.02561 719 469 170 80
174 We missed the organ donor. 1.4579 0.02647 712 475 148 89
175 I told you not to click free delivery by drone. 1.4579 0.02454 712 450 198 64
176 You know, I think this is concerning 1.4576 0.02790 708 496 102 110
177 That Rachmaninoff Piano Concerto No.2 never fails to brings the house down 1.4570 0.02572 709 468 160 81
178 Well, Dorothy, there's one baby grand that isn't in Kansas any more... 1.4566 0.02826 668 458 115 95
179 Not what I had in mind when I told you to drop a grand on the house 1.4561 0.03281 399 253 110 36
180 I wasn't ready for that last movement. 1.4550 0.02666 655 428 156 71
181 Oh, that’s grand...just grand. 1.4544 0.02619 680 445 161 74
182 Looks like atonal loss 1.4538 0.02696 639 418 152 69
183 I never knew music could have such an impact. 1.4525 0.02736 590 380 153 57
184 Should we call the tuner? 1.4520 0.02736 635 420 143 72
185 I know it’s 2020, but I did not see that coming. 1.4518 0.02677 633 412 156 65
186 The piano movers did mention they were dropping it off. 1.4517 0.02636 631 406 165 60
187 They said they would leave the keys near the front door. 1.4514 0.02653 638 414 160 64
188 I really regret signing up for that crash course in piano. 1.4514 0.02699 638 419 150 69
189 So when you said they'd drop off the keys... 1.4509 0.02604 632 416 156 60
190 This is the problem with online shopping. You can never tell how big anything is by the photos. 1.4503 0.02771 624 415 137 72
191 I hear they survived with major and minor injuries. 1.4501 0.02650 651 426 157 68
192 Ironic, our deductible is a grand. 1.4496 0.02644 625 403 163 59
193 And you laughed when I got giant piano insurance. 1.4496 0.02644 625 403 163 59
194 Not what I had in mind when I asked you to “fill the house with music.” 1.4494 0.02713 623 411 145 67
195 It really takes the focus off that horrible sofa in the den. 1.4493 0.03548 345 222 91 32
196 I'm going to say it, I don't always get Frank Gehry. 1.4467 0.02717 600 393 147 60
197 It took 88 keys, but at least now the door is open. 1.4449 0.04416 227 148 57 22
198 Looks like that took care of the elephant in the room. 1.4448 0.02778 580 380 142 58
199 I actually ordered an upright. 1.4448 0.02746 580 377 148 55
200 On second thoughts, glad we didn't quarantine 1.4447 0.03071 434 276 123 35
201 Well played, 2020. 1.4444 0.02664 585 384 146 55
202 On the other hand, not many people can say they've got a piano in every room. 1.4444 0.02771 576 378 141 57
203 It’s like this thing just fell off a clef 1.4443 0.02842 574 381 131 62
204 In retrospect, next-day drone delivery did seem a little too good to be true. 1.4433 0.02692 609 398 152 59
205 I suppose drone delivery was a bit of a reach. 1.4431 0.02756 580 379 145 56
206 And I said, 'No need for insurance. Never going to happen. 1.4431 0.02735 580 377 149 54
207 I liked it better when the choices were limited to 'bird,' 'plane,' or 'Superman.' 1.4413 0.02733 596 392 145 59
208 The insurance company says it was orchestrated 1.4409 0.02790 567 372 140 55
209 I hear in the divorce settlement he agreed to drop off the keys. 1.4409 0.02889 567 381 122 64
210 Before the climate changed it was only frogs and fish. 1.4405 0.02822 588 394 129 65
211 So, I guess we'll be doing Thanksgiving at your mom's? 1.4394 0.02698 553 353 157 43
212 ...and if FEMA won't help, call the NEA 1.4393 0.03069 560 400 77 83
213 Wow! Someone dropped a grand on that dump? 1.4388 0.02874 556 371 126 59
214 Wow. The forecast was for piccolos. 1.4386 0.02896 529 349 128 52
215 Well, that was certainly the most original version of Hayden's "Surprise Symphony" that I ever heard.. 1.4379 0.02818 580 388 130 62
216 I keep telling the fed x guy not to throw items on the porch. 1.4376 0.02864 537 354 131 52
217 Do we have to disclose this to the buyer? 1.4368 0.02908 538 360 120 57
218 Delivery by drone obviously has its flaws. 1.4364 0.02780 566 385 124 57
219 Is 'Grand Slam' only a term used for baseball? 1.4364 0.05179 165 109 40 16
220 Once upon a time, this would' have fazed us. 1.4358 0.02765 537 352 138 47
221 So I said, "If I'm not here, just leave it on the porch." 1.4350 0.02849 531 349 133 49
222 I guess drone delivery still has a few kinks to work out. 1.4345 0.02862 534 353 130 51
223 I heard the kid say that the only way he would take piano lessons would be if a piano fell out of the sky and landed on the house. 1.4338 0.02798 551 363 137 51
224 It's what's known as a massive art attack. 1.4335 0.02934 519 346 121 52
225 I'm sure I said "Alexa, play Pennies from Heaven" 1.4329 0.03064 492 332 107 53
226 Well, I did ask for a sign. Susan, I'm quitting my job and restarting the band. 1.4321 0.02914 530 355 121 54
227 The house B-Flat. 1.4320 0.02971 507 339 117 51
228 Can't wait for the State Farm commercial on this one! 1.4319 0.03068 514 353 100 61
229 88 keys and they still couldn’t get in. 1.4314 0.02945 510 340 120 50
230 You were right. Our house is too small for a piano. 1.4303 0.02787 509 352 113 44
231 Oh no, not again. 1.4300 0.03048 507 348 101 58
232 The house comes with a piano. 1.4300 0.02930 507 337 122 48
233 2020, am I right? 1.4297 0.02904 526 351 122 52
234 We also thought the election results of 2016 would never happen. 1.4289 0.03044 499 339 106 54
235 Amazon needs to re-think drone deliveries. 1.4280 0.02610 521 339 146 36
236 Well that concerto brought the house down 1.4280 0.02986 521 355 109 57
237 Actually, this is a lot less bizarre than the RNC convention. 1.4280 0.02986 521 355 109 57
238 I always thought that there were only harps up there. 1.4280 0.02965 500 337 113 50
239 Rooftop entertaining sounded like a good idea 1.4278 0.04663 180 116 51 13
240 Well, it’s certainly not the worst thing that’s happened this year. 1.4277 0.03021 498 337 109 52
241 You think this is bad, you should see where the pianist landed. 1.4274 0.02962 496 331 118 47
242 Let’s meet the new neighbors another time - they seem busy. 1.4272 0.02961 515 348 114 53
243 When he said he’d be dropping off the piano, I thought…. 1.4268 0.02893 471 305 131 35
244 The ad said the sellers were throwing in a piano "on the house". 1.4257 0.02963 505 340 115 50
245 Can’t say I’m surprised given the way this year is going 1.4256 0.02985 484 323 116 45
246 Well, piano falling on house. I think that completes our 2020 BINGO card. 1.4251 0.03038 494 339 102 53
247 Well, Isaac Newton would be proud. 1.4237 0.03053 472 318 108 46
248 Well that performance brought down the House ! 1.4232 0.03068 475 322 105 48
249 Concert literally brought the house down 1.4232 0.03319 475 340 69 66
250 In the showroom, it looked smaller. 1.4232 0.02995 475 317 115 43
251 Well, they did say there would only b minor damage... 1.4218 0.03179 467 323 91 53
252 Maybe if you turn it around it will fit 1.4218 0.03061 467 315 107 45
253 So, it's not just harps the angels play. 1.4218 0.03038 486 333 102 51
254 Hell Yeah, I still want to buy the house...I mean, what are the chances of that ever happening again?? 1.4216 0.02852 491 322 131 38
255 Should have ordered the harmonica. 1.4216 0.02994 491 332 111 48
256 I guess drone delivery is not for everything. 1.4213 0.02889 489 333 112 44
257 Looks like the Wicked Witch has made some new enemies. 1.4213 0.03086 489 353 76 60
258 On that note... 1.4212 0.02971 463 306 119 38
259 Fall 2020, right on schedule. 1.4209 0.03286 392 262 95 35
260 Timbre! 1.4200 0.03329 419 289 84 46
261 ''I can't Handel this.'' 1.4197 0.03414 355 236 89 30
262 Well, instead of a house warming we can call it a grand opening. 1.4192 0.03164 458 315 94 49
263 That’s destruction on a grand scale. 1.4185 0.02929 454 297 124 33
264 When I said we should drop a grand on the new house, I was speaking *metaphorically*! 1.4183 0.03070 471 321 103 47
265 I knew we should have hired a fiddler on the roof. 1.4183 0.03114 471 324 97 50
266 We can’t collect insurance—it was orchestrated. 1.4183 0.02919 471 316 115 40
267 Should I have tipped the movers? 1.4181 0.03085 452 305 105 42
268 Yeah. . . 2020. 1.4176 0.03133 467 322 95 50
269 That must have been some hurricane to hit the Florida Keys. 1.4172 0.03172 465 323 90 52
270 I thought they only played harps up there...? 1.4167 0.03098 468 321 99 48
271 I wonder when they switched from playing harps? 1.4167 0.05025 168 113 40 15
272 A crash course in the piano - did you read the fine print? 1.4165 0.03025 461 310 110 41
273 Wonder if Farmers has seen this thing? 1.4163 0.03122 466 321 96 49
274 And God said, if you play Chopsticks one more time... 1.4163 0.03182 442 303 94 45
275 Well, the movers did say it was on the house. 1.4163 0.03034 442 294 112 36
276 Before this Administration, raining giant Steinways would have been really freaky! 1.4158 0.03197 457 318 88 51
277 Does your insurance cover A-Major disaster? 1.4148 0.03431 393 273 77 43
278 I hear the delivery guy once had a newspaper route. 1.4142 0.03108 437 295 103 39
279 The listing says, “a fixer-upper with a grand view.” 1.4142 0.03125 437 296 101 40
280 I downloaded it from the cloud. 1.4141 0.03181 454 315 90 49
281 I guess the fat lady sang 1.4137 0.03644 336 231 71 34
282 See? Piano insurance was not a waste of money 1.4136 0.03240 428 295 89 44
283 You picked the free shipping option, didn’t you? 1.4136 0.03084 428 286 107 35
284 Either we’re getting smaller or our problems are getting bigger. 1.4133 0.02977 450 299 116 35
285 Not the weirdest thing to happen this year. 1.4133 0.03123 450 308 98 44
286 At least now we don't have to worry about getting it through the door. 1.4131 0.03199 426 291 94 41
287 They did say you'd get the piano on-the-house. 1.4129 0.03003 448 302 109 37
288 Are we insured against metaphors? 1.4129 0.03196 448 311 89 48
289 Buy the house next to the beanstalk," you said. "What could go wrong?" you said 1.4126 0.03078 429 287 107 35
290 There was music in the air. 1.4118 0.03134 425 287 101 37
291 Well, I certainly didn’t see that one coming. 1.4112 0.03123 445 307 94 44
292 A minor fall, a major lift. 1.4112 0.03336 411 286 81 44
293 Man! His piano skills really DID bring down the house! 1.4101 0.03069 434 292 106 36
294 Wow! A Steinway! What are the odds? 1.4100 0.03061 439 296 106 37
295 Wow, perfect pitch 1.4097 0.03096 432 292 103 37
296 Well, it was a baby grand when I ordered it. 1.4097 0.03079 432 291 105 36
297 What were the chances of that happening?" "I'd say 20 20 1.4096 0.03122 437 298 99 40
298 I am hoping there is no encore. 1.4096 0.03105 437 297 101 39
299 Remember when it was only cats and dogs? 1.4096 0.02967 437 289 117 31
300 It looks like we're in treble. 1.4096 0.03105 437 297 101 39
301 Do you think they’ve seen this thing or two at Farmer’s Insurance? 1.4066 0.03176 423 290 94 39
302 He's really bringing down the house! 1.4062 0.05039 160 108 39 13
303 I don't think we're covered for lounge acts of God. 1.4055 0.03237 402 275 91 36
304 I told you the performance would bring down the house. 1.4054 0.03283 407 282 85 40
305 Fine, I agree, the piano's too big. 1.4045 0.03298 398 277 82 39
306 The drone will drop it at your front door, you said... 1.4045 0.03240 398 272 91 35
307 He warned us: 'My way or the Steinway.' 1.4044 0.03221 408 280 91 37
308 On the other hand, they did deliver within the 2-day window. 1.4040 0.03172 396 267 98 31
309 I guess when you wish upon a star it pays to be specific 1.4040 0.03405 396 279 74 43
310 Did you say your piano playing brought down the house? 1.4040 0.03386 396 278 76 42
311 Remember when storms just blew your outdoor furniture around. 1.4039 0.03444 359 247 79 33
312 I'm not ordering another drone delivery until they work the bugs out. 1.4039 0.03204 411 282 92 37
313 I told them it wouldn’t fit. 1.4034 0.03168 414 283 94 36
314 Y'know, when you told me the damage would B Minor, I kinda thought something different... 1.4031 0.03333 392 272 82 38
315 Unusual for this time of year. 1.4029 0.03160 412 281 96 35
316 Grand! Just grand! 1.4025 0.03311 405 283 81 41
317 You always think it can't happen to you. 1.4020 0.03346 393 274 80 39
318 That explains the giant stool in the back yard. 1.4020 0.03162 408 278 96 34
319 Just when I thought 2020 couldn't get more cartoonish... 1.4016 0.03330 376 258 85 33
320 You should have ordered a BABY grand! 1.4010 0.03133 399 269 100 30
321 Well, nobody will notice the elephant in the room anymore 1.4010 0.03133 399 269 100 30
322 Now THAT was pianoforte! 1.4010 0.03232 399 274 90 35
323 You’re right, let’s buy the house. What are the odds of that ever happening again? 1.3995 0.03285 393 272 85 36
324 Colonel Mustard in the Study with the Piano. 1.3995 0.03266 393 271 87 35
325 This is going to tough to blame on Obama. 1.3995 0.03347 373 257 83 33
326 Remind me to cancel our Amazon Prime Air delivery subscription before the refrigerator ships. 1.3990 0.03348 386 269 80 37
327 I guess size does matter. 1.3988 0.03362 346 234 86 26
328 I can still remember when they used to use a wrecking ball. 1.3987 0.03587 301 203 76 22
329 It's so 2020. 1.3978 0.03331 372 256 84 32
330 At first,I thought you yelled,'Timbre!' 1.3973 0.03375 375 260 79 35
331 Eric is currently in charge of the Trump moving company. 1.3973 0.03397 375 262 77 36
332 I told you not to antagonize the Steinways. 1.3967 0.03378 368 255 80 33
333 I say we leave it where it is and call it performance art. 1.3962 0.03536 318 217 76 25
334 Just another day in 2020. 1.3953 0.03288 382 264 85 33
335 The 26 trombones are next door. 1.3952 0.03382 377 264 77 36
336 All I said was “Could 2020 get any worse?” 1.3950 0.03348 362 249 83 30
337 And the movers had the nerve to ask for an online review. 1.3947 0.03278 380 262 86 32
338 The value has been reduced by a grand. 1.3947 0.03257 380 261 88 31
339 I hate to start renovations on a bad note. 1.3942 0.02893 378 256 100 22
340 I don't know who orchestrated this attack, but it looks like a concerted effort. 1.3941 0.04217 269 195 42 32
341 He always said his performing would bring down the house... 1.3936 0.03387 376 264 76 36
342 So how much did you save with the free delivery option? 1.3936 0.03080 376 250 104 22
343 Yes, Cheryl, I do know that the USPS would have done a better job of delivery 1.3930 0.03314 374 259 83 32
344 Compared to the pandemic and forest fires, I'd put this somewhere on the descending scale. 1.3930 0.03102 374 252 98 24
345 I think I prefer cats and dogs 1.3930 0.03249 374 256 89 29
346 I’m so glad I skipped the flood and sinkhole and went straight for the low flying giant piano insurance option. 1.3929 0.03265 364 253 82 29
347 Finally, a smash hit! 1.3926 0.03306 377 264 79 34
348 You should always check the dimensions before ordering online. 1.3926 0.03274 377 260 86 31
349 Do you think they’ll try to consider this an act of God? 1.3925 0.03304 372 257 84 31
350 It isn’t exactly what I’d imagined when I opted for Drop Shipped. 1.3920 0.03328 375 261 81 33
351 I’m so over this year. 1.3919 0.03382 370 259 77 34
352 See, size does matter!!! 1.3919 0.03425 370 261 73 36
353 This used to be an upscale neighbourhood! 1.3914 0.03623 327 230 66 31
354 I guess Drone Delivery service hasn’t been perfected yet 1.3914 0.03275 373 257 86 30
355 This was a delivery Für Elise..Good thing she was out Chopin 1.3914 0.03488 373 267 66 40
356 Do you think this is a good enough excuse for your mother? 1.3896 0.03266 367 252 87 28
357 Good thing we’re not in a cartoon 1.3892 0.03572 352 252 63 37
358 I hope the fiddler wasn’t on the roof. Submitted by Douglas Monaghan Floral Park, New York 1.3884 0.03470 363 258 69 36
359 If it had been a giant harp, the insurance company could have called it an Act of God. 1.3876 0.03405 356 249 76 31
360 So, given delivery options, you picked drone? 1.3876 0.03381 356 248 78 30
361 I always knew classical music could bring the house down. 1.3868 0.03429 349 244 75 30
362 I think I left the stove on. 1.3868 0.03888 287 204 55 28
363 How many homes will be destroyed before they finally do something about falling pianos? 1.3866 0.03443 357 252 72 33
364 At this scale, the damage doesn't seem to B-Minor to me... 1.3866 0.03488 357 254 68 35
365 Which is the front door key? 1.3866 0.03420 357 251 74 32
366 What happened to cats and dogs? 1.3864 0.03237 352 239 90 23
367 F major. 1.3859 0.03547 355 255 63 37
368 This is why we can't have nice things. 1.3853 0.03538 327 231 67 29
369 The worst part is that I just had it tuned. 1.3853 0.03179 353 238 94 21
370 This is terrible luck -- our house is only insured for woodwind damage. 1.3853 0.03400 353 247 76 30
371 We did tell them not to leave deliveries on the porch.... 1.3853 0.03205 353 239 92 22
372 I guess this is the grand finale. 1.3849 0.03579 304 210 71 23
373 Awkward. 1.3846 0.03797 351 263 41 47
374 That's going to be a bitch to get back in tune 1.3844 0.03221 346 234 91 21
375 No, stupid, play till you bring the house down is just an expression. 1.3840 0.03544 349 250 64 35
376 Do you think that now we can sell the whole thing to MOMA? 1.3837 0.03311 344 236 84 24
377 I was wrong. I prefer the locusts. 1.3836 0.03659 305 214 65 26
378 As if this weren't bad enough, I ordered an upright. 1.3833 0.03341 347 240 81 26
379 I still have my doubts about drone delivery ... 1.3833 0.03366 347 241 79 27
380 Is it Baroque? 1.3833 0.03582 347 250 61 36
381 I'll take the house. What's the chance of that happening again? 1.3833 0.03316 347 239 83 25
382 You were right. It's not going to fit in the study. 1.3833 0.03366 347 241 79 27
383 What a Crashcendo 1.3826 0.03379 345 240 78 27
384 We shouldn't have picked the drone delivery option. 1.3826 0.03549 345 247 64 34
385 Still waiting on the volcano, but that piano insurance just paid for itself. 1.3824 0.03388 340 236 78 26
386 I think it’s Baroque” 1.3821 0.03839 301 217 53 31
387 My homework? A piano fell on my house and broke the internet. 1.3820 0.03519 322 225 71 26
388 Its a little out of scale for a house like this. 1.3819 0.03367 343 238 79 26
389 His last performance really brought down the house. 1.3812 0.04021 202 134 59 9
390 Metaphor my ass; it's a piano! 1.3810 0.03336 336 231 82 23
391 Someone orchestrated this. 1.3805 0.03537 297 204 73 20
392 Well, your sister did say the keys were on the front porch. 1.3804 0.03405 326 225 78 23
393 We can expect more of this if the Democrats win the elections. 1.3801 0.03569 342 246 62 34
394 The fog was so dense last night that the pilot had to make an instrument landing. 1.3801 0.03580 321 227 66 28
395 Our neighbor received our complaint. 1.3791 0.03598 335 241 61 33
396 Darn, I was gonna fix the screen door this weekend. 1.3787 0.03628 301 211 66 24
397 Well Ma’am, our first priority in this case would be looking for a very flat coyote. 1.3787 0.03500 338 240 68 30
398 Huh, it looked smaller in the store. 1.3784 0.03563 333 238 64 31
399 I told you I heard something. 1.3784 0.03486 333 235 70 28
400 This is A major problem. 1.3784 0.03537 333 237 66 30
401 That piano has been nothing but treble. 1.3784 0.03486 333 237 67 29
402 That's the last time I order anything from a drop-shipper. 1.3782 0.03537 312 218 70 24
403 Goddamnit. Again? 1.3780 0.03614 336 243 59 34
404 I'm pretty sure this house is going to wind up on the Chopin block. 1.3779 0.03674 299 211 63 25
405 The Feng Shui is totally off... 1.3774 0.03581 310 223 61 26
406 Is THIS the “Day The Music Died?” 1.3770 0.04419 191 132 46 13
407 Seems about right for 2020. 1.3769 0.03514 329 233 68 28
408 At least now we know where that music was coming from. 1.3769 0.03380 329 228 78 23
409 Up on the Roof “ might work better on guitar 1.3769 0.03618 329 237 60 32
410 We’re insured with that company that says “We’ve seen it all and we covered it,” right? 1.3769 0.03567 329 235 64 30
411 I thought they didn't have anything bigger than harps up there. 1.3769 0.03324 329 231 74 24
412 This is so 2020 😮 1.3769 0.03488 329 232 70 27
413 The forecast only called for winds. 1.3766 0.03684 308 220 60 28
414 No pianist has had a worse audition with St. Peter. 1.3766 0.03684 308 220 60 28
415 Yep, it's still 2020. 1.3766 0.03655 308 219 62 27
416 Has anyone seen the cat? 1.3764 0.03688 263 180 67 16
417 Yes Jan, I understand the gravity of the situation. 1.3761 0.03489 327 233 66 28
418 Order from Amazon", you said. "They have drone delivery", you said. "What could go wrong? 1.3761 0.03529 327 232 67 28
419 Three months from now we’ll look back on this as the good ol’ days. 1.3760 0.03902 242 172 51 19
420 Crashendo 🎼 1.3758 0.03648 322 232 59 31
421 Well, that's a smash hit. 1.3754 0.03645 309 220 62 27
422 I understand the candelabra took out a school bus. 1.3754 0.03516 325 230 68 27
423 Call the house tuner. Tell him it’s flat. 1.3754 0.03649 325 235 58 32
424 Whoa! Here comes the bench! 1.3754 0.03434 325 227 74 24
425 It’s a gift from your Aunt Dorothy in Kansas. 1.3754 0.03462 325 228 72 25
426 Makes raining cats and dogs seem like nothing. 1.3750 0.03385 320 224 74 22
427 He always said he'd get back at us for making him take piano lessons. 1.3743 0.04668 187 133 38 16
428 I can't tell if this is art or a mistake. 1.3741 0.03745 294 210 58 26
429 I told you to not let the roadrunner in the house. 1.3738 0.03680 321 233 56 32
430 Remember when you said dropping a grand into the roof would pay off in the long run...? 1.3738 0.03546 321 228 66 27
431 When I said I had to drop a grand on the roof, this isn’t what I meant. 1.3738 0.03289 321 221 81 19
432 See!? I knew it! We are cartoon characters! 1.3730 0.03670 319 231 57 31
433 I said "Fiddler" on the roof!! 1.3730 0.03448 319 223 73 23
434 Makes our massive clarinet damage seem pretty reasonable. 1.3730 0.03539 311 219 68 24
435 It's a tonal loss. 1.3729 0.03704 295 210 60 25
436 Go ahead and say it - 'Rooftop piano bar, bad idea.' 1.3728 0.03809 287 206 55 26
437 Well, the salesman did say that delivery was on the house. 1.3726 0.03486 314 223 67 24
438 I think Amazon might want to rethink drone deliveries. 1.3722 0.03658 317 229 58 30
439 Well, that fell flat. 1.3722 0.03404 317 220 76 21
440 She got the piano, but he got the house 1.3722 0.03658 317 229 58 30
441 This is one of those classic marriage moments where I chastise you for not measuring. 1.3718 0.03602 312 225 59 28
442 Remember those old piano lounges in 747's? 1.3718 0.03529 312 220 68 24
443 Well, that brought the house down. 1.3718 0.03411 312 224 66 22
444 I had a feeling it was gonna be too big for our space. 1.3718 0.03587 312 224 61 27
445 Worse is on the way. This is only the Baby. 1.3714 0.03403 315 221 72 22
446 And that's why I'm voting for the guy who will keep giant pianos out of the suburbs. 1.3714 0.03563 315 224 65 26
447 Don't worry about getting locked out. The house comes with 88 keys. 1.3714 0.03388 315 218 77 20
448 That's gonna be way more than a grand. 1.3714 0.03591 315 225 63 27
449 That last movement really brought down the house! 1.3714 0.03591 315 225 63 27
450 The agent said we're only covered for wind instruments. 1.3714 0.03647 315 227 59 29
451 I dont care what the listing says, that's not a Steinway. 1.3714 0.03476 315 221 71 23
452 I think that Heaven is having more fun than we are. 1.3714 0.03563 315 224 65 26
453 This is f*** major! 1.3714 0.03447 315 220 73 22
454 Steinway from heaven? 1.3710 0.03660 310 223 59 28
455 what's a Steinway?" "About 20,000 pounds 1.3707 0.03647 294 208 63 23
456 You were right, a piano really did change the look of our house.” 1.3706 0.03606 313 224 62 27
457 I’m thinking F-major. 1.3701 0.03818 308 227 48 33
458 Not again... 1.3701 0.03734 308 224 54 30
459 That’s a grand slam. 1.3701 0.03705 308 223 56 29
460 I just know the media is going to blow this out of proportion. 1.3696 0.03778 257 179 61 17
461 Looks like there are still a few kinks in cloud storage. 1.3693 0.03693 306 221 57 28
462 No longer surprised by anything, #2020 1.3693 0.03750 306 223 53 30
463 I read that 846 years ago, the same asteroid deposited a Hammond Organ.” 1.3684 0.03709 304 220 56 28
464 So the major lift precedes the minor fall? 1.3677 0.03670 291 207 61 23
465 It's a bit flat. 1.3668 0.03621 289 204 64 21
466 I'll never condone vandalism, but you have to admit it's creative. 1.3661 0.03536 295 207 68 20
467 well, that certainly strikes a chord 1.3652 0.03506 282 195 71 16
468 Well, that should take care of the deductible. 1.3645 0.03565 299 212 65 22
469 You should have just signed up for streaming music like everyone else. 1.3645 0.04220 203 142 48 13
470 Thank God we have cliché insurance. 1.3640 0.03769 261 184 59 18
471 That new drone delivery system has its shortcomings. 1.3630 0.03719 292 214 53 24
472 Anthony is going to have a heart attack-ack-ack-ack when he gets home. 1.3630 0.03813 292 214 50 28
473 g-Flat, I'm pretty sure 1.3630 0.03813 292 214 49 28
474 Did they even TRY the door first? 1.3630 0.03490 292 209 62 21
475 Well that's settles that! The piano is definitely a member of the percussian family. 1.3630 0.03623 292 208 62 22
476 I guess you were right. No way it fits through the front door. 1.3630 0.03750 292 212 54 26
477 Do you think they're home? 1.3624 0.03633 287 204 62 21
478 Do you see a piano bench? It was supposed to come with a bench. 1.3621 0.03573 290 205 65 20
479 Not even a Steinway. Let's keep looking. 1.3618 0.03645 293 210 60 23
480 I guess we exceeded our cloud storage. 1.3614 0.03847 285 209 49 27
481 In any other year I would not have believed it. 1.3614 0.03581 285 201 65 19
482 I guess I should have chosen ground shipping. 1.3614 0.04111 202 140 51 11
483 You were right. A full concert grand would overwhelm the space. 1.3611 0.03622 288 205 62 21
484 Talked to the agent. We're only insured for uprights. 1.3611 0.03655 288 206 60 22
485 Imagine the size of the pianist. 1.3611 0.03688 288 219 42 27
486 Steinways always bring the house down. 1.3611 0.03416 288 203 68 17
487 You just had to choose “Drone delivery” didn’t you. 1.3611 0.03555 288 203 66 19
488 It's for sale and they're tossing in the piano. 1.3611 0.03622 288 205 62 21
489 I always knew we’d have to drop a grand or two on the house before we could list it. Now I’m not so sure that’s a good idea. 1.3611 0.03655 288 206 60 22
490 By the way, I’m also sleeping with our therapist. 1.3611 0.03655 288 206 60 22
491 Well Edith, I guess this proves that the kids were wrong when they said that everything can be safely uploaded to that “cloud” thing. 1.3607 0.03693 280 200 59 21
492 It Baroque.” 1.3601 0.03672 286 205 59 22
493 You were right, honey. A fiddler would have been better. 1.3601 0.03376 286 204 64 18
494 An anvil would have been enough to get the point across. 1.3601 0.03867 286 211 47 28
495 The answer is blowing in the wind 1.3601 0.03867 286 211 47 28
496 Apparently, Dorothy's baby grand is also not in Kansas anymore. 1.3594 0.04283 217 157 42 18
497 And here we were worried about that big tree falling on the house. 1.3594 0.03524 281 199 64 18
498 Its called grand entrance 1.3592 0.03655 284 203 60 21
499 That's what we get for ordering from ACME Pianos. 1.3592 0.03551 284 205 58 21
500 This cloud-based retail thing still needs work. 1.3592 0.03586 284 201 64 19
501 I told you his brilliant piano playing would one day bring the house down. 1.3592 0.04043 284 215 36 33
502 What would Chopin do? 1.3584 0.04630 173 123 38 12
503 I measured twice... 1.3574 0.03537 277 194 67 16
504 We should have ordered the Baby Grand. 1.3571 0.03757 280 203 54 23
505 This is what happens if you prank call the public station pledge drive. 1.3571 0.03891 280 207 46 27
506 I told you to lift with your legs. 1.3571 0.03858 280 206 48 26
507 Etude, Brute? 1.3571 0.03891 280 207 46 27
508 There's a big pianist joke in here somewhere. 1.3571 0.03547 280 202 58 20
509 Can we keep it? 1.3571 0.03511 280 196 68 16
510 Treble from Above! 1.3569 0.03449 283 197 71 15
511 At least it's not as big as the piano that killed the dinosaurs. 1.3564 0.03770 275 199 54 22
512 Whatever. It's 2020. 1.3563 0.03912 261 190 49 22
513 We tried to explain the difference between a grand and a baby grand. He wouldn’t listen. 1.3562 0.05026 146 104 32 10
514 I did not hear that one coming. 1.3561 0.03581 278 201 57 20
515 When I said ‘just put it anywhere’ that’s not what I meant. 1.3561 0.03635 278 198 61 19
516 It's not so funny when it's your house, is it? 1.3559 0.03712 281 203 56 22
517 Well, at least 2020 is starting to show a sense of humor. 1.3556 0.03671 270 192 60 18
518 Where are Laurel & Hardy when you need them! 1.3553 0.03823 273 199 51 23
519 I guess the bench will be dropped off later. 1.3553 0.03530 273 191 67 15
520 Hmm...I liked it better where it was before. 1.3551 0.03758 276 200 54 22
521 You'll laugh, but I liked it better in the family room. 1.3542 0.03507 271 191 65 15
522 Accident investigators are going to report 88 key findings. 1.3542 0.03697 271 194 58 19
523 And you were worried about the window I forgot to close. 1.3542 0.03734 271 195 56 20
524 Eighty-eight keys and we still can't get in. 1.3540 0.03668 274 196 59 19
525 When the music really brings the house down. 1.3540 0.03776 274 199 53 22
526 Well, I guess I would not have known where to put it anyway. 1.3540 0.03741 274 198 55 21
527 I told them to leave the keys UNDER the mat. 1.3540 0.03846 274 201 49 24
528 He already called. There's a Falling Piano exclusion. 1.3540 0.03915 274 203 45 26
529 Other than that, how did you like the piece? 1.3540 0.03705 274 197 57 20
530 NASA said the 2018VP1 asteroid was the size of a piano and poses no threat to Earth, but now I'm not so sure. 1.3532 0.03825 269 196 51 22
531 I'll admit, I was expecting frogs. 1.3532 0.03714 269 193 57 19
532 Any chance it arrived with a wicked witch and ruby slippers? 1.3532 0.03825 269 196 51 22
533 Some more fall out from 'Stairway to Heaven' applicants I think. 1.3532 0.03967 269 200 43 26
534 I heard that one of the horsemen was classically trained. 1.3532 0.03677 269 192 59 18
535 That was an F-major. 1.3532 0.03861 269 197 49 23
536 Oh, grand. Just grand. 1.3532 0.03600 269 190 63 16
537 And we just had it tuned! 1.3532 0.03788 269 195 53 21
538 Told you we shouldn't have had it drop shipped. 1.3532 0.03770 269 197 50 22
539 Some one sure likes to make a grand entrance. 1.3532 0.03714 269 193 57 19
540 We need a piano room. 1.3532 0.03896 269 198 47 24
541 Well, this should end the debate over whether the piano is a string or percussion instrument. 1.3532 0.03677 269 192 59 18
542 Ok, no more drone delivery. 1.3532 0.03320 269 188 70 11
543 Perhaps drone delivery wasn't the best idea. 1.3532 0.03402 269 191 63 14
544 Strange as it may seem, no one heard a thing. 1.3532 0.03751 269 194 55 20
545 Amazon texted that the bench will arrive tomorrow. 1.3532 0.03751 269 194 55 20
546 Some people just aren't cut out for the tiny house movement. 1.3532 0.03788 269 195 53 21
547 It looked smaller in the catalog. 1.3529 0.03900 272 201 46 25
548 You were right; it does seem ostentatious. 1.3529 0.03794 272 198 52 22
549 Don't you feel the urge to just go on up there and play chopsticks? 1.3523 0.03837 264 192 51 21
550 Wonder what happened to the stool? 1.3523 0.03442 264 196 51 17
551 You just had to order the adult grand, didn't you? 1.3523 0.04635 176 127 36 13
552 The insurance company wants to know if it's natural or accidental. 1.3521 0.03880 267 196 48 23
553 When Joe said his concerto brought the house down, I was picturing something else. 1.3520 0.04362 196 141 41 14
554 I guess we should have picked ground delivery. 1.3517 0.03887 236 168 53 15
555 This place could use a tune-up. 1.3506 0.04220 231 171 39 21
556 I think the realtor’s office might have sent over the wrong set of keys. 1.3504 0.03908 234 167 52 15
557 They no longer sparked joy. 1.3504 0.04282 254 195 29 30
558 This is A-flat house. 1.3502 0.03920 237 170 51 16
559 They should have told us it wasn’t to scale. 1.3502 0.03920 237 170 51 16
560 I should’ve married your sister, the concert tambourinist. 1.3498 0.04028 263 197 40 26
561 You were right. It’s too big for the living room. 1.3498 0.03570 263 185 64 14
562 The asking price was too high, so asked the owners to drop a grand. 1.3498 0.03529 263 191 57 15
563 The drone delivery program still has some bugs to be worked out. 1.3498 0.03806 263 191 52 20
564 To be fair, it did sound like you asked the genie for giant pianist. 1.3498 0.04100 263 199 36 28
565 Well, he's really brought down the house with that performance. 1.3498 0.03844 263 192 50 21
566 I say we don't give the movers a big tip 1.3494 0.03745 249 177 57 15
567 I told you “Fee fi fo fum” meant he was getting mad and you should shut up! 1.3492 0.03584 252 176 64 12
568 There was music in the air...until there wasn't 1.3488 0.03777 258 186 54 18
569 So, when you said you dropped a grand on the new house.... 1.3487 0.04049 261 196 39 26
570 I checked with the insurance. The piano is covered. 1.3487 0.03667 261 186 59 16
571 Drop a few grand on your house and it will look like new, they said. 1.3487 0.03747 261 188 55 18
572 Wonder who in Heaven thought to improve on a mic drop? 1.3487 0.03976 261 194 43 24
573 Honey, I shrunk the stage. 1.3487 0.04262 261 202 27 32
574 Just remember how much we saved by moving it ourselves. 1.3487 0.03901 261 192 47 22
575 Sometimes, music just hits you. 1.3487 0.03607 261 187 58 16
576 Oh, for goodness sake, I said "PENNIES" from heaven! 1.3485 0.04047 241 177 44 20
577 You were right. A spinet made more sense. 1.3485 0.03717 264 192 53 19
578 No wonder second day air delivery was free 1.3482 0.03922 224 159 52 13
579 The rooftop lounge was a bad idea. 1.3482 0.03976 247 181 46 20
580 I'm so glad we waited to replace the roof. 1.3480 0.03859 250 181 51 18
581 Kind of ironic. I think our deductible is around a grand. 1.3477 0.03673 256 182 59 15
582 It's not my copy of East of Eden, but you have to admit the same-day delivery is impressive. 1.3475 0.03765 259 187 54 18
583 On the plus side, somewhere there's a passenger plane which just got a lot of extra leg room. 1.3475 0.03603 259 183 62 14
584 Well Baby, ain't this grand? 1.3465 0.03935 254 187 46 21
585 Yeah, we should have gone with the upright. 1.3465 0.03540 254 180 61 13
586 I always thought a coyote had to be underneath.... 1.3456 0.04107 217 157 45 15
587 You weren't kidding about bringing the house down! 1.3451 0.03882 255 187 48 20
588 That’s not what I meant when I said, “Let’s drop a grand on home improvements.” 1.3451 0.03802 255 185 52 18
589 I just knew your brother was going to leave the job half done. 1.3451 0.04152 255 194 34 27
590 Definitely in tune with the times. 1.3448 0.04008 203 143 50 10
591 Told ya it wouldn’t fit. 1.3448 0.04244 203 147 42 14
592 I bet we could buy this house for a song. 1.3439 0.03862 253 185 49 19
593 I think it's going to have to be tuned. 1.3439 0.03902 253 186 47 20
594 "Well, at least that pesky roadrunner problem is finally resolved" 1.3439 0.03674 253 188 46 19
595 I told you his playing would bring the house down. 1.3439 0.03942 253 187 45 21
596 They said Climate Change would lead to natural disasters on a grand scale... 1.3439 0.03821 253 184 51 18
597 I can remember when it only rained cats and dogs. 1.3439 0.03696 253 181 57 15
598 You never think it’ll happen to you 1.3439 0.04021 253 189 41 23
599 Wouldn’t you know it, the one thing I don’t have coverage for. 1.3439 0.03902 253 186 47 20
600 It’s the wrong White House 1.3439 0.03738 253 188 48 17
601 I never thought of the piano as an instrument of destruction. 1.3438 0.04015 224 162 47 15
602 First the anvil, then the safe. No way the insurance company will pay for this. 1.3438 0.03870 256 188 48 20
603 Damn 2020 1.3438 0.03870 256 188 48 20
604 I guess you'd call that a grand slam 1.3427 0.03744 248 178 55 15
605 Oh, the Humanities! 1.3426 0.04003 251 187 42 22
606 I tell you — it needs tuning! 1.3426 0.03840 251 188 42 21
607 So I told her ... if you drop the price ten grand, we'll take it ... she might have misheard me. 1.3426 0.03692 251 182 53 16
608 It'll need to be tuned. 1.3426 0.03649 251 181 55 15
609 The Realtor said the Piano would be "On the House"... 1.3426 0.03798 251 182 52 17
610 I knew Hurricane Ludwig was going to be trouble.” 1.3426 0.03881 251 184 48 19
611 I think the delivery drone thing is being way oversold. 1.3426 0.03840 251 188 42 21
612 What’s a Steinway? Enough to crush a house. 1.3426 0.04042 251 188 40 23
613 Drone may not have been the best delivery choice. 1.3426 0.03922 251 185 46 20
614 At least we got home before a porch pirate could steal it." 1.3426 0.03714 251 182 53 16
615 Should we ring the doorbell or just play F? 1.3426 0.03756 251 181 54 16
616 I don't like the new drone delivery system anymore. 1.3426 0.04082 251 189 38 24
617 It's a tuner upper. 1.3425 0.03808 254 185 51 18
618 It may need tuning... 1.3425 0.03684 254 182 57 15
619 It's 2020. We should have expected this. 1.3425 0.03641 254 181 59 14
620 Hmm, I thought they all played the harp. 1.3425 0.03329 254 195 44 15
621 They did say the demolition would be a grand. 1.3425 0.04084 254 192 37 25
622 Now that cloud shaped like an anvil is making me nervous. 1.3421 0.04012 228 166 46 16
623 Just last night the news was only predicting heavy woodwinds. 1.3420 0.04137 193 137 46 10
624 If this happens one more time, they're going to cancel our insurance. 1.3418 0.03906 237 172 49 16
625 It doesn't spark joy. 1.3415 0.03977 246 182 44 20
626 The tornado went right thru Graceland 1.3415 0.03935 246 181 46 19
627 It happened the day the music died. 1.3415 0.03762 246 177 54 15
628 Day the music died? 1.3415 0.03718 246 176 56 14
629 Yeah, but it’s still funny. 1.3415 0.04018 246 183 42 21
630 Steinway from Heaven , indeed... 1.3415 0.04018 246 183 42 21
631 Well, shit. 1.3415 0.04140 246 186 36 24
632 Well, isn’t that grand! 1.3414 0.03943 249 184 45 20
633 You always wanted a piano in the front room. 1.3414 0.02699 249 186 52 11
634 Et tu, forte? 1.3414 0.03731 249 179 55 15
635 So that's how The Beatles got that sound at the end. 1.3414 0.03859 249 182 49 18
636 We’ll need to get that tuned. 1.3414 0.03688 249 178 57 14
637 Well,guess who got a second term? 1.3414 0.03710 249 186 44 19
638 Love it or Liszt it? 1.3414 0.04104 249 188 37 24
639 Well, they did say they’d drop it off today 1.3409 0.03904 220 157 51 12
640 I thought the agent meant that the house came with no strings. 1.3405 0.04146 232 173 39 20
641 Are we in an insurance ad? 1.3404 0.03880 235 170 50 15
642 Do you keep all your music in the cloud? 1.3402 0.03825 244 177 51 16
643 In the key of A Flat Manor. 1.3402 0.03955 244 180 45 19
644 This is the house we bought for a song. 1.3402 0.03955 244 180 45 19
645 That’s why they now use harps. 1.3402 0.03955 244 180 45 19
646 Well ain't that grand? 1.3402 0.03781 244 181 45 18
647 I don't want to be here when the neighbors return from vacation. 1.3402 0.03869 244 178 49 17
648 That's not what I meant when I said I wanted a new roof in a "classical style" . 1.3402 0.03913 244 179 47 18
649 The worst part is that our insurance only covers uprights 1.3402 0.03869 244 178 49 17
650 He’s six. Did he really need a grand piano? 1.3402 0.04040 244 182 41 21
651 Well, you know, it is 2020 1.3402 0.04040 244 182 41 21
652 It's 2020, ... enough said. 1.3402 0.03955 244 180 45 19
653 Huh, I guess the drone delivery service needs some tuning up, too. 1.3402 0.03825 244 177 51 16
654 Arrived by drone on next-day delivery. 1.3402 0.03913 244 179 47 18
655 Perhaps if we added some violins, the piano wouldn't seem so overpowering. 1.3402 0.03736 244 175 55 14
656 Hurricane Ludwig 1.3402 0.03825 244 177 51 16
657 Well, Anna, I'd say God wants you to switch to clarinet. 1.3402 0.03955 244 180 45 19
658 The insurance company isn't going to believe this happened again. 1.3402 0.04040 244 182 41 21
659 It’s bigger than I expected. 1.3402 0.03691 244 181 48 15
660 Like I said I’ll vote for Trump the day it starts raining grand pianos. 1.3402 0.03913 244 179 47 18
661 It may need a little fine-tuning.... 1.3402 0.04122 244 184 37 23
662 Tell me we have heavy-cartoonish-items-falling-from-great-heights insurance. 1.3402 0.03455 244 180 50 14
663 It's more like a crash-scendo. 1.3402 0.03781 244 176 53 15
664 Go ahead, call my fears unreasonable. 1.3402 0.04081 244 183 39 22
665 I’m not afraid of a fixer upper, but this house is too Baroque to Handel. 1.3402 0.04122 244 184 37 23
666 Summer 2020’s grand finale 1.3402 0.04040 244 182 41 21
667 Welp, it’s not the worst thing that’s happened in 2020. 1.3402 0.03781 244 176 53 15
668 Do you think mom will notice? 1.3401 0.04086 247 186 38 23
669 Pianos are big again. 1.3393 0.04057 224 164 44 16
670 Ah yes, I’ve heard they can become somewhat self-destructive when they turn forte 1.3393 0.04250 224 168 36 20
671 Yeah, Trump’s chances of getting re-elected are as little as a giant piano fallin...oh-oh. 1.3391 0.04030 230 169 44 17
672 Shall we stay for the encore? 1.3391 0.03983 230 168 46 16
673 Honey I could have sworn the realtor said it featured a ‘grand patio’! 1.3391 0.03837 230 165 52 13
674 Maybe we can sue for treble damages. 1.3391 0.03900 233 169 49 15
675 I prefer when it rains cats and dogs. 1.3388 0.03519 242 176 54 12
676 Yeah...only in 2020 1.3388 0.03889 242 177 48 17
677 It’s flat. 1.3388 0.03976 242 179 44 19
678 Has that always been there? 1.3388 0.03899 245 180 47 18
679 What if we paint it white ? 1.3388 0.03633 245 174 59 12
680 Well, Ms. Kent, I'm guessing Clark's recital didn't go so well. 1.3380 0.04039 213 154 46 13
681 He said it was coming on TUESDAY! 1.3380 0.04054 216 157 45 14
682 I know you asked for next day delivery but did you know it was by air? 1.3377 0.04062 231 171 42 18
683 Dun, dun, dun, duuuunnn! 1.3377 0.04062 231 171 42 18
684 I see my old piano teacher's feet sticking out from under the house. 1.3375 0.03864 240 175 49 16
685 Effin' 2020. 1.3375 0.03864 240 175 49 16
686 I guess we won't have any trouble finding the keys. 1.3375 0.04210 240 183 33 24
687 Look! The bass is higher than the treble. 1.3375 0.04084 240 180 39 21
688 I guess you're right. Size does matter. 1.3375 0.03819 240 174 51 15
689 The damage is estimated to be over a grand. 1.3375 0.03535 240 177 51 12
690 I guess Sam won't be playing it again! 1.3361 0.03930 238 175 46 17
691 I think it’s time to face the music 1.3361 0.03697 238 170 56 12
692 We should have paid the extra for white glove inside delivery. 1.3361 0.03839 238 173 50 15
693 Well, that's the last time I give a delivery drone a bad review! 1.3361 0.03792 238 174 49 15
694 Well, Amazon did deliver it when promised. 1.3361 0.03930 238 175 46 17
695 This kind of gives the term 'A flat' a whole new meanting. 1.3361 0.04149 238 180 36 22
696 Yup, this is definitely 2020. 1.3361 0.03975 238 176 44 18
697 Classical music can be so powerful! 1.3361 0.03839 238 173 50 15
698 His piano concerto always brings the house down 1.3361 0.03839 238 173 50 15
699 Which plague was this? 1.3361 0.04019 238 177 42 19
700 I'm afraid your policy doesn't cover acts of Bach. 1.3361 0.03975 238 176 44 18
701 All these keys and we still can’t get into the house. 1.3361 0.03839 238 173 50 15
702 Which key opens the front door? 1.3361 0.03997 238 179 39 20
703 ‘...well it's a percussion instrument after all" 1.3361 0.03839 238 173 50 15
704 This next song is going to bring down the house 1.3361 0.03839 238 175 47 16
705 My request for a grand-baby was misread by the stork. 1.3361 0.03697 238 179 43 16
706 You know someone is going to demand we caption this. 1.3361 0.03983 241 179 43 19
707 I'd estimate the damage at 88 grand. 1.3348 0.03939 233 171 46 16
708 Guess you found your keys. 1.3347 0.03835 236 174 46 16
709 I prefer a fiddler on the roof. 1.3347 0.03802 239 176 47 16
710 I said PENNIES from heaven! 1.3333 0.03815 231 167 51 13
711 I bet the real estate agent doesn't show up. 1.3333 0.04108 234 176 38 20
712 You said you wanted a performance that brought the house down. 1.3333 0.04092 228 170 40 18
713 No surprise. It’s 2020. 1.3319 0.03850 232 176 40 16
714 Good thing we're covered for 'Instruments of Destruction'. 1.3319 0.03946 232 171 45 16
715 You have to admit, that sounded amazing. 1.3319 0.03850 232 169 49 14
716 You always said you wanted a "house full of music" 1.3319 0.03702 232 166 55 11
717 Saint Peter warned Paul thousands of time to quit playing Hello, Dolly every time a woman arrived at the Pearly Gates. 1.3319 0.04131 232 175 37 20
718 You just had to say 'Beethoven' three times in the bathroom mirror. 1.3319 0.04085 232 174 39 19
719 I think a little to the left 1.3319 0.03801 232 168 51 13
720 I thought you said this could only happen in Biden’s America, Karen 1.3319 0.03946 232 171 45 16
721 It’s an extended metaphor. 1.3319 0.03946 232 171 45 16
722 The worst part is we just had it tuned. 1.3319 0.03302 232 171 50 11
723 We are in major treble. 1.3319 0.03898 232 170 47 15
724 Don’t call the movers, honey. I can do it myself 1.3319 0.03850 232 169 49 14
725 I think the delivery drones have reached their limit 1.3319 0.03946 232 171 45 16
726 Well that's just grand now, isn't it 1.3319 0.03733 229 167 50 12
727 Still, we’re lucky the anvil missed us. 1.3319 0.03933 229 168 46 15
728 It's our lucky day. A free piano. 1.3319 0.04123 229 172 38 19
729 Look, honey! The stork brought the baby grand! 1.3319 0.03835 229 166 50 13
730 We know a thing or two, because we've seen a thing or two. 1.3319 0.04123 229 172 38 19
731 Well, at least they left a note. 1.3318 0.04006 223 164 44 15
732 I should have downloaded Fiddler on the Roof. 1.3318 0.04341 220 168 31 21
733 It’s my late Nana’s piano. I guess you really can’t take it with you. 1.3317 0.03641 205 152 42 11
734 When I said I wanted to drop a grand on a home reno project, this isn't what I had in mind. 1.3317 0.03970 199 142 48 9
735 This strikes an ominous tone. 1.3316 0.03944 196 139 49 8
736 When they said they'd drop it off at noon, I didn't think they meant from 20,000 feet. 1.3316 0.04074 196 141 45 10
737 and it's been reduced by a grand 1.3304 0.04003 227 168 43 16
738 The insurance agent said to take pictures. 1.3304 0.03954 227 167 45 15
739 That *was* the grand finale! 1.3304 0.03855 227 165 49 13
740 I see they left the keys to the house. 1.3304 0.03905 227 166 47 14
741 The recital was fine up to the crashendo. 1.3304 0.04240 227 173 33 21
742 Why would anyone want to get rid of a perfectly good piano? 1.3304 0.03954 227 167 45 15
743 It is was it is. 1.3304 0.03673 227 174 36 17
744 There are some things that shouldn’t be delivered by drone. 1.3304 0.03954 227 167 45 15
745 It really makes the house seem small, doesn't it. 1.3304 0.03804 227 164 51 12
746 This will cost us more than a grand. 1.3304 0.04003 227 168 43 16
747 Now that’s what I call bringing down the house. 1.3304 0.03954 227 167 45 15
748 So other than that, how are things going? 1.3304 0.04052 227 169 41 17
749 I knew she was keyed up and strung out but this is ridiculous. 1.3304 0.04100 227 170 39 18
750 Free shipping, but the accident insurance was through the roof. 1.3304 0.04052 227 169 41 17
751 Someone dropped their keys... 1.3304 0.03905 227 166 47 14
752 How's that for a B-flat? 1.3304 0.03905 227 166 47 14
753 Maybe we should try bringing it in through the back. 1.3304 0.03905 227 166 47 14
754 What can I say, that performance was through the roof! 1.3304 0.03954 227 167 45 15
755 I think that proves the theory that music has a major impact on our lives. 1.3304 0.04003 227 168 43 16
756 Architecturally, it seems a bit out of tune. 1.3304 0.03954 227 167 45 15
757 So much for being in tune with the universe. 1.3304 0.04052 227 169 41 17
758 Hmm looks like it was orchestrated from above 1.3304 0.03905 227 166 47 14
759 What is a house in the grand scheme of things? 1.3304 0.04003 227 168 43 16
760 I guess I shouldn’t have prayed so hard for a Steinway. 1.3304 0.03905 227 166 47 14
761 ...which is why I play flute. 1.3304 0.03954 227 167 45 15
762 Looks like we got the neighbor’s delivery again. 1.3304 0.03647 227 161 57 9
763 I honestly didn't see that one coming. 1.3304 0.03954 227 167 45 15
764 'It didn't seem as big on the website' 1.3304 0.03752 227 163 53 11
765 We should have gone with the upright. 1.3304 0.03752 227 163 53 11
766 Next time let's do curbside pickup. 1.3303 0.03853 218 157 50 11
767 On the other hand, maybe our $200,000 home just turned into half a mil of conceptual art. 1.3302 0.03832 215 154 51 10
768 Not sure if “giant grand piano falling from space” is covered. 1.3302 0.03944 215 158 44 13
769 I suppose it will have to be re-tuned. 1.3302 0.04106 215 159 41 15
770 Sure, but at least the Democrats aren't in charge. 1.3302 0.04362 215 164 31 20
771 I told you ...crashendo. 1.3289 0.04037 228 170 41 17
772 I’ll never use the Laurel & Hardy Moving Company again! 1.3289 0.03988 228 169 43 16
773 Given 2020, this is only a minor key event. 1.3289 0.03738 228 164 53 11
774 I don’t get it. That poor coyote just stood there while the shadow got bigger and bigger. 1.3289 0.04084 228 171 39 18
775 This is why “virtual” performances are so much safer. 1.3289 0.03790 228 165 51 12
776 I believe that is known as piano forte... 1.3289 0.03823 225 163 50 12
777 It's more Gershwin than Gehry. 1.3289 0.03976 225 171 37 17
778 Well that's two things we don't have to argue about anymore. 1.3289 0.03771 225 162 52 11
779 I'm pretty sure it was an A sharp on initial impact, but then settled into a D flat 1.3289 0.03718 225 161 54 10
780 And they said a house would be my biggest purchase... 1.3289 0.04311 225 173 30 22
781 I told you we shouldn't try to move it ourselves. 1.3287 0.04244 216 163 35 18
782 Well, ain't that a hell of a note? 1.3287 0.04193 216 162 37 17
783 Remember when it was just cats and dogs? 1.3287 0.03928 216 157 47 12
784 NOW do you believe that I heard someone say, 'Fee-fi-fo-fum piano lessons are just DUMB'? 1.3287 0.04142 216 161 39 16
785 Not exactly what I had in mind when I ordered air delivery. 1.3286 0.05012 140 103 28 9
786 I told you this song really hits home 1.3285 0.03864 207 148 50 9
787 You were right – it doesn’t go with the rest of the house. 1.3274 0.03860 226 165 48 13
788 I'm sure I ordered a white one. 1.3274 0.03911 226 166 46 14
789 I think God wanted to bring the house down, but it looks like he picked the wrong white house. 1.3274 0.04010 226 168 42 16
790 I just wish they hadn't used a drone to deliver it! 1.3274 0.03997 223 165 43 15
791 Good thing our insurance covers acts of Gould. 1.3274 0.04170 223 171 32 20
792 Sue saw it happen - said the house came out of nowhere 1.3274 0.04195 223 169 35 19
793 Was asking them not to practice after 10 that unreasonable? 1.3270 0.04099 211 156 41 14
794 Well, that's just grand! 1.3258 0.03968 221 163 44 14
795 The piano clause only covers the piano. 1.3258 0.04120 221 166 38 17
796 Strikes a chord, doesn't it? 1.3258 0.03809 221 160 50 11
797 That's what happens when you mess with the mail. 1.3258 0.04070 221 165 40 16
798 I guess we should have gone with the Baby Grand. 1.3258 0.03643 221 157 56 8
799 That's the last time I hope something grand befalls us" 1.3258 0.04019 221 164 42 15
800 I told you it was going to look too big once we got it in the room. 1.3258 0.03916 221 162 46 13
801 A Steinway. Note that there is minimal damage to the instrument. 1.3258 0.04120 221 166 38 17
802 So Amazon's delivering pianos now. 1.3258 0.04456 221 173 24 24
803 On the bright side, it's really the high point of our year so far. 1.3258 0.03968 221 163 44 14
804 Well, it landed a bit flat. 1.3258 0.04070 221 165 40 16
805 We should have gotten a baby grand. 1.3258 0.04219 221 168 34 19
806 What fresh hell is this?! 1.3257 0.04211 218 165 35 18
807 Yeah, this non contact delivery isn't working for me" 1.3243 0.04104 222 167 38 17
808 Here are the keys, but where's the house? 1.3242 0.04293 219 168 31 20
809 Well, now we’re going to have to get it tuned. 1.3242 0.04194 219 166 35 18
810 I'm almost sure I told them to drop it off AT the house. 1.3238 0.03697 210 154 46 10
811 So much for free air delivery! 1.3234 0.03863 201 144 49 8
812 I told you it wouldn't fit. Maybe if we turn it the other way. 1.3227 0.03921 220 165 42 13
813 Well, apparently we're at war with Austria. 1.3226 0.03931 217 162 41 14
814 I always wondered what might happen in a real crescendo. 1.3226 0.03958 217 160 44 13
815 It was only then that they understood the importance of the "Piano Falling From Sky" option in their home insurance policy. 1.3226 0.04064 217 162 40 15
816 'When they recover the black box, we'll know what went wrong". 1.3224 0.03995 214 158 43 13
817 See,I told you the door would have to come off its hinges. 1.3224 0.04103 214 160 39 15
818 So much for piano music being stored in the cloud. 1.3224 0.04157 214 161 37 16
819 Once again, the Surrealists win... 1.3224 0.03940 214 157 45 12
820 So 2020 *could* get worse. 1.3224 0.04050 214 159 41 14
821 That’s why you’re supposed to measure first. 1.3224 0.03940 214 157 45 12
822 Now, someone's going to have to face the music. 1.3224 0.03884 214 156 47 11
823 And so we have Piano Concerto No. 2020... 1.3224 0.04261 214 163 33 18
824 Is that a Renzo Piano? 1.3224 0.03827 214 167 30 17
825 Well now, isn't that just grand! 1.3224 0.03995 214 158 43 13
826 Maybe we should just incorporate it into the remodel. 1.3224 0.03995 214 158 43 13
827 Don't worry, it's just a hoax. It'll be gone when the weather gets warmer. 1.3224 0.04050 214 159 41 14
828 I say we rebuild, right here. The chances of this happening again are pretty slim. 1.3224 0.03651 214 152 55 7
829 I'm glad to see Frank Gehry is keeping it fresh. 1.3224 0.04103 214 160 39 15
830 Let's try a different room. 1.3221 0.04185 208 156 37 15
831 So it turns out I accidentally ordered from Amazonian. 1.3220 0.04284 205 155 34 16
832 I guess someone got tired of Zoom recitals. 1.3211 0.04068 190 138 43 9
833 What else could go wrong?" you said.. 1.3209 0.03924 215 158 45 12
834 Hurricane Rachmaninoff was no joke. 1.3209 0.04140 215 162 37 16
835 At least it wasn't his blue ox. 1.3209 0.04087 215 161 39 15
836 Remember when I asked if you'd unchecked the 'drone delivery' box 1.3208 0.03961 212 156 44 12
837 There's your problem. 1.3208 0.03961 212 156 44 12
838 Wow, what are the chances of a grand piano randomly dropping out of the sky like that?.....but then it is 2020. 1.3208 0.04181 212 160 36 16
839 Siri, cancel the 18-foot bust of Beethoven, ASAP. 1.3208 0.03904 212 155 46 11
840 Didn't we order an upright? 1.3208 0.04017 212 157 42 13
841 I’d say we’re in big treble! 1.3208 0.03904 212 155 46 11
842 Okay, you were right. A keyboard would have been sufficient. 1.3208 0.03933 212 158 41 13
843 I’m guessing there will be little or no practice this afternoon? 1.3208 0.03668 212 157 45 10
844 Free delivery my ass! 1.3208 0.04181 212 160 36 16
845 Looks like we've been played. 1.3208 0.04072 212 158 40 14
846 That's the last time I'll choose drone delivery. 1.3208 0.03961 212 156 44 12
847 Our house...in B flat. 1.3208 0.04072 212 158 40 14
848 I't's 2020. I'm not asking questions anymore. 1.3208 0.04181 212 160 36 16
849 I’m afraid those are the keys to the house. 1.3208 0.03961 212 156 44 12
850 I think the climate's just mocking us now. 1.3208 0.04127 212 159 38 15
851 Well it's still better than the banjo. 1.3208 0.03961 212 156 44 12
852 That was one hell of a crescendo! 1.3208 0.04286 212 162 32 18
853 At least it was free delivery. 1.3208 0.03788 212 153 50 9
854 2020 can’t be over too soon. 1.3208 0.04072 212 160 37 15
855 The score said "Crashendo" 1.3208 0.04072 212 158 40 14
856 Giant Mozart's Sonata in B Flat Major always brings down the house. 1.3208 0.04127 212 159 38 15
857 That’s it, I’m canceling Amazon Prime. 1.3208 0.04072 212 158 40 14
858 Well, that certainly brought the house down.. 1.3208 0.03847 212 154 48 10
859 Let's try a fiddler next time. 1.3208 0.04072 212 158 40 14
860 I’m only giving them 4 stars. It looked smaller online and their delivery by drone has some issues. 1.3208 0.04072 212 158 40 14
861 It must still be 2020! 1.3208 0.04286 212 162 32 18
862 You're right. The ominous music was getting louder. 1.3208 0.03961 212 156 44 12
863 Angels play harps, right? 1.3208 0.04181 212 160 36 16
864 Designed by another Frank Gehry wannabe. 1.3208 0.03350 212 162 41 9
865 All I said was “Alexa, drop some beats.” 1.3208 0.03961 212 156 44 12
866 I’d like to see the stork that dropped this baby. 1.3208 0.03481 212 160 43 9
867 They did say it was a crash course. 1.3208 0.04286 212 162 32 18
868 He said our policy does not cover musical dissonance. 1.3208 0.03961 212 156 44 12
869 Maybe a little TOO Grand. 1.3208 0.04234 212 161 34 17
870 This is a catastrophe on a grand scale. 1.3208 0.04072 212 158 40 14
871 They call this ‘no-contact’ delivery? 1.3196 0.03874 194 139 48 7
872 How many signs does one apocalypse need? 1.3192 0.04110 213 160 38 15
873 I think it’s about time we downsized to A flat 1.3192 0.03684 213 160 41 12
874 The reviews said she brought down the house 1.3192 0.04056 213 159 40 14
875 Ars longa, casa brevis 1.3192 0.03889 213 156 46 11
876 Well, this is just grand. 1.3190 0.04151 210 158 37 15
877 We should’ve paid extra for the white glove delivery 1.3190 0.03807 210 152 49 9
878 Isn't that gecko supposed to show up now? 1.3190 0.04096 210 157 39 14
879 Hear that? B-flat. 1.3190 0.04040 210 156 41 13
880 I don't think Next Day Air was the right delivery choice. 1.3190 0.03867 210 155 44 11
881 When I look back on 2020, it will be the day the pianos became sentient and turned on us that will haunt me the most. 1.3190 0.04096 210 157 39 14
882 Is it just me or is House Hunters getting more and more outrageous? 1.3185 0.04661 135 97 33 5
883 ‘December 31, 2020’ 1.3184 0.03915 201 151 38 12
884 If you make a 50-foot pianist joke right now I'm leaving you. 1.3175 0.04188 211 160 35 16
885 That ended on a sad note. 1.3175 0.03967 211 156 43 12
886 Sometimes Carnegie Hall comes to you. 1.3175 0.04295 211 162 31 18
887 I think it's the 2020 Overture. 1.3175 0.04079 211 158 39 14
888 You were right; it won’t fit. 1.3173 0.04119 208 156 38 14
889 Wow, you really brought the house down. 1.3173 0.03766 208 150 50 8
890 You said you wanted a house filled with music. 1.3173 0.03946 208 153 44 11
891 You and your just put it anywhere ! 1.3173 0.03946 208 155 41 12
892 All I know is that the owner's a coyote. 1.3173 0.04119 208 156 38 14
893 That's going to be a major setback for drone delivery services. 1.3173 0.03887 208 152 46 10
894 Now THAT's what I call a Grand Opening! 1.3173 0.03946 208 153 44 11
895 Well good thing I just bought flood, earthquake, and giant piano falling on your house insurance. 1.3173 0.04062 208 155 40 13
896 I noticed an open fifth in the delivery van. 1.3173 0.04119 208 156 38 14
897 Gentrification. 1.3173 0.04005 208 154 42 12
898 Baby grands are always cute. But look what happens when they grow up. 1.3173 0.04230 208 158 34 16
899 I think he must have misunderstood when I said, "Drop me a note." 1.3173 0.04005 208 154 42 12
900 That’s the last time I wish someone would drop me a note. 1.3173 0.04062 208 155 40 13
901 It's a hoax. 1.3173 0.03796 208 158 37 13
902 At first it was pretty traumatic, but we’ve really learned to embrace it as the new normal. 1.3173 0.04005 208 154 42 12
903 They wouldn’t turn their music down, so I left them a note. 1.3165 0.04673 158 118 30 10
904 It looked smaller on my phone. 1.3158 0.03562 209 153 48 8
905 I don't think drone delivery was a good idea. 1.3155 0.04027 206 153 41 12
906 Misjudged their space. It happens. 1.3155 0.03847 206 155 39 12
907 Feels right for 2020 to go out with a bang, or rather a crescendo. 1.3155 0.04256 206 157 33 16
908 They always said he could bring the house down with his playing! 1.3155 0.04200 206 156 35 15
909 It looked smaller on Amazon. 1.3155 0.03908 206 151 45 10
910 Well,she told me she'd drop off the keys. 1.3155 0.03908 206 151 45 10
911 Call The New Yorker, they gotta see this...!!! 1.3155 0.04086 206 154 39 13
912 I believe there is a mistake in scale here. 1.3155 0.04311 206 158 31 17
913 That’s the last time I ask for Chopsticks with our order 1.3155 0.04256 206 157 33 16
914 Be careful what you wish for they say 1.3155 0.04420 206 160 27 19
915 So that’s how John Cage’s concerto for grand piano and bungalow goes. 1.3155 0.04027 206 153 41 12
916 I may have to rethink my views on climate change. 1.3153 0.03486 203 165 27 11
917 Well, I'll never be impressed by the 1812 Overture again. 1.3152 0.04615 184 142 26 16
918 Let's just hope that wasn't Ferrante's or Teicher's. 1.3145 0.04733 159 120 28 11
919 A big piano solo always brings down the house. 1.3144 0.04193 194 145 37 12
920 Let's make an offer. It should go for a song. 1.3144 0.03861 194 142 44 8
921 I think its a Banksy. 1.3144 0.04318 194 147 33 14
922 When it crashed onto the house the sound was a distinct F-sharp 1.3140 0.04293 207 159 31 17
923 Cool.that cloud looks like a fish 1.3137 0.04282 204 156 32 16
924 Proportion and perspective are a true challenge for the cartoon artist. 1.3137 0.04050 204 152 40 12
925 I mean, they DID say it wouldn't fit through the door. 1.3137 0.03642 204 148 49 7
926 Location is key 1.3137 0.04282 204 156 32 16
927 As we gaze upon the wreckage, let us recall that I was the one who didn't want to move next to the giants and you were the one who said I was being an alarmist. Oh, and you owe me five dollars. 1.3134 0.04210 201 152 35 14
928 Clearly God has both a sense of humor and a preference for a cappella. 1.3134 0.04210 201 152 35 14
929 The drone delivery service needs some fine-tuning. 1.3134 0.04269 201 153 33 15
930 I guess drone delivery is still in beta. 1.3134 0.04384 201 155 29 17
931 Ironic, piano in Italian means softly, quietly. 1.3134 0.04029 201 149 41 11
932 Apparently President Trump declared mid-flight he wanted an even bigger piano on Air Force One 1.3134 0.04210 201 152 35 14
933 Damn that Liberace and his zeppelin. 1.3134 0.04384 201 155 29 17
934 Okay, we found a place for your piano. Now, where are we putting my ukulele?" 1.3134 0.04151 201 151 37 13
935 Is that one of those small houses or is that a really grand piano? 1.3134 0.04269 201 153 33 15
936 The listing did say they'd dropped a grand. 1.3128 0.04357 179 134 34 11
937 You know, I said a free piano would be nice, but I didn’t really expect a piano on the house. 1.3125 0.04590 192 150 24 18
938 I guess that’s why they went for a fiddler in that show... 1.3122 0.04429 205 160 26 19
939 I ordered it to b e drop-shipped - I had no idea!!!! 1.3122 0.04092 205 154 38 13
940 I thought we ordered a baby grand. 1.3119 0.04012 202 150 41 11
941 I think we are beyond the fat lady singing. 1.3119 0.04133 202 152 37 13
942 Are you sure she wouldn’t consider getting a pony instead? 1.3117 0.04468 154 113 34 7
943 quite a crashendo! 1.3116 0.04052 199 148 40 11
944 Funny,this happened last year,but federal insurance paid for them to build in exactly the same spot. What are the odds? 1.3116 0.04175 199 150 36 13
945 There's a coyote under there somewhere. 1.3116 0.04581 199 157 22 20
946 This is where Buster Keaton grew up. 1.3116 0.04235 199 151 34 14
947 Well, they said there would be strong winds and high “c”s 1.3116 0.04114 199 149 38 12
948 When Grandma said she was a organ donor, this was not what I expected... 1.3116 0.04295 199 152 32 15
949 You were the one praying for a grand piano. Look, here comes the bench. 1.3116 0.03989 199 147 42 10
950 I see God tried to tackle Rachmaninoff. 1.3116 0.04235 199 151 34 14
951 This house was advertised as "No Strings Attached!" 1.3109 0.04069 193 143 40 10
952 How 2020. 1.3105 0.04373 190 145 31 14
953 I guess you’re right, it won’t fit in the house. 1.3103 0.04289 203 156 31 16
954 Golly. Talk about ending on a sour note. 1.3103 0.04056 203 152 39 12
955 Looks like the Amazon might need to go back to the drawing board on their drone delivery thing. 1.3100 0.04096 200 150 38 12
956 I knew she was a witch when she called the cops about our barking dog 1.3100 0.04392 200 155 28 17
957 Don't worry, I know a guy 1.3096 0.04200 197 149 35 13
958 He finally brought down the house. 1.3096 0.03879 197 144 45 8
959 You are right dear, the concert grand seems to overwhelm our cottage 1.3096 0.04011 197 146 41 10
960 It was a small tastefully decorated house, now with an open floor in D minor. 1.3096 0.04440 197 153 27 17
961 Is it still in tune? 1.3096 0.03603 197 150 37 9
962 Pachelbel shot it from his canon in D Street 1.3096 0.04261 197 150 33 14
963 The final craschendo was wonderful! 1.3096 0.03978 197 148 38 11
964 Well, I guess the upside is we don’t have to fight about hosting my family for the holidays. 1.3096 0.04011 197 146 41 10
965 I bet Farmer's Insurance hasn't seen this yet! 1.3096 0.04261 197 150 33 14
966 I didn’t even know they could fly. 1.3096 0.04138 197 148 37 12
967 Now THAT performance brought the house down. 1.3096 0.04322 197 151 31 15
968 It's 2020. Of COURSE there was a giant grand piano storm. 1.3096 0.04200 197 149 35 13
969 THIS IS A BÖSENDORFER. WE ORDERED A STEINWAY. 1.3096 0.04261 197 150 33 14
970 The Piano Man must've been making love to his tonic and gin again. 1.3096 0.04075 197 147 39 11
971 Well, Ed, the regular size wasn’t eligible for Prime 1.3096 0.04075 197 147 39 11
972 I think we should Liszt it. 1.3096 0.04075 197 147 39 11
973 So that's what she meant by 'The keys are on the doorstep.' 1.3093 0.04307 194 148 32 14
974 Does it come with the house? 1.3093 0.03984 194 143 42 9
975 And on that note, we left Kansas 1.3091 0.04599 165 125 29 11
976 Oh look its a ‘pianodemic’ 1.3089 0.04092 191 142 39 10
977 Welp. I'm not saying anything new here, but... l guess that's why they call it the blues. 1.3085 0.04258 201 154 32 15
978 It looked smaller online. 1.3081 0.03863 198 145 45 8
979 I knew there'd be problems with drone delivery. 1.3081 0.04182 198 150 35 13
980 I would have preferred cats and dogs. 1.3081 0.03994 198 147 41 10
981 At least now we can take a break from home schooling. 1.3081 0.03658 198 147 43 8
982 Honey, you ordered the wrong size! 1.3081 0.04478 198 155 25 18
983 There's still some things you shouldn't order on Amazon. 1.3081 0.04057 198 148 39 11
984 Well, at least we did save on the delivery charge. 1.3081 0.04057 198 148 39 11
985 Bigger house or smaller piano — it’s not rocket science. 1.3077 0.03967 195 144 42 9
986 That was some drone. 1.3077 0.04643 195 155 20 20
987 When they said 'drop it off' I assumed their truck would come by. 1.3077 0.04033 195 145 40 10
988 I think the fat lady sang. 1.3077 0.04287 195 149 32 14
989 That’s one way to make a grand entrance. 1.3077 0.03900 195 143 44 8
990 Is it just me, or have they both gone a little flat? 1.3077 0.04409 195 151 28 16
991 Looks like ‘Somebody’ hit SMITE instead of ESC again. 1.3077 0.04225 195 148 34 13
992 In hindsight, perhaps drone delivery wasn't the best choice. 1.3077 0.03832 195 142 46 7
993 They’re saying it’s the biggest to hit this area in 50 years. 1.3077 0.04162 195 149 33 13
994 Huge misunderstanding. Apparently, the contractor was told NOT to sink one more grand into the project. 1.3077 0.04033 195 145 40 10
995 remember when we used to complain about the upstairs neighbors shaking the crumbs from their tablecloth on our balcony? 1.3077 0.04098 195 146 38 11
996 . "So much for a road runner as a pet!" 1.3077 0.04225 195 148 34 13
997 I said I want a grandbaby! Not a baby grand! 1.3077 0.04162 195 147 36 12
998 I still think the adjuster would find a fire more believable. 1.3073 0.04007 192 142 41 9
999 Not sure, but the President said it had to do with Biden. 1.3065 0.03847 199 146 45 8
1000 At least you didn’t leave the oven on. 1.3065 0.04364 186 142 31 13
1001 You signed up for Amazon's drone service too? 1.3061 0.04080 196 147 38 11
1002 Ding dong. See, the pitch is dead. 1.3061 0.04207 196 149 34 13
1003 Bezos needs to work on those drone deliveries. 1.3061 0.04329 196 153 27 16
1004 We may need to get it tuned.... 1.3061 0.03883 196 149 36 11
1005 Are those the new house keys you ordered? 1.3057 0.03989 193 143 41 9
1006 Now there was an encore that brought the house down. 1.3057 0.04187 193 146 35 12
1007 It could be worse. It could be raining. 1.3057 0.04187 193 146 35 12
1008 I'll buy it for a dollar. 1.3057 0.04498 193 151 25 17
1009 Quite the grand entrance. 1.3057 0.03989 193 143 41 9
1010 It's got several keys needed to be a great home! 1.3057 0.04498 193 151 25 17
1011 Right before it hit, I heard a voice from above yell 'Hey Moe'. 1.3057 0.04376 193 149 29 15
1012 Maybe an upright piano would fit better. 1.3057 0.03745 193 147 36 10
1013 This is going to set us back more than a grand. 1.3057 0.03989 193 143 41 9
1014 A little girl and her dog crawled out of the piano and walked off singing 1.3057 0.04376 193 149 29 15
1015 On second thought, I think I actually want to learn guitar. 1.3057 0.04498 193 151 25 17
1016 Fixer-upper, piano's on the house. Obviously. 1.3057 0.04314 193 148 31 14
1017 I told you we should have gone with the baby grand. 1.3057 0.03989 193 143 41 9
1018 #endpianoviolence 1.3057 0.04314 193 148 31 14
1019 So much for shipping your family’s grand piano by air. 1.3057 0.04498 193 153 22 18
1020 But is it art? 1.3057 0.04437 193 150 27 16
1021 Maybe we shouldn't order from Amazon Drone anymore. 1.3053 0.03994 190 143 37 10
1022 Classic Grand slam! 1.3053 0.04165 190 143 36 11
1023 Now that's a grand slam. 1.3053 0.04165 190 143 36 11
1024 As is. I'd say it's worth about a grand. 1.3053 0.04361 190 146 30 14
1025 Next time decline the drone delivery 1.3053 0.03591 190 141 43 6
1026 I knew putting it on the second floor was a mistake. 1.3053 0.03924 190 142 39 9
1027 Never again, Sam. 1.3053 0.04297 190 145 32 13
1028 So I couldn't get this tune out of my head and suddenly it came to me. 1.3053 0.04029 190 141 40 9
1029 Now - that's what you call a smash hit. 1.3053 0.04297 190 145 32 13
1030 It's probably unplayable. 1.3041 0.04168 194 149 32 13
1031 The instructions were leave it on the porch and ring the bell. 1.3041 0.04038 194 145 39 10
1032 O.K., you were right: drone delivery was a terrible idea. 1.3041 0.04038 194 145 39 10
1033 Next time, let's require a signature. 1.3037 0.03942 191 146 35 10
1034 Don't worry, you said. It'll fit,you said. 1.3037 0.04146 191 144 36 11
1035 I thought pianos came after frogs. 1.3037 0.04011 191 142 40 9
1036 Sadly, the melody ended in a "crush-endo." 1.3037 0.04146 191 144 36 11
1037 You hit the B Flat key a little hard... 1.3034 0.04412 145 106 34 5
1038 That drone drop was for Philharmonic Hall, not Phil and Harmony Hall. 1.3032 0.04324 188 144 31 13
1039 Coltrane wreck 1.3032 0.04389 188 145 29 14
1040 Wow, that was really heavy music. 1.3032 0.04257 188 143 33 12
1041 I guess the murder hornets, the coronavirus and the hurricanes weren't enough. 1.3032 0.04324 188 144 31 13
1042 We shouldn’t have bought that cartoonist’s house! 1.3032 0.04257 188 143 33 12
1043 damn, what are the odds of local National Guard helicopters accidentally dropping huge black metaphors for cosmopolitanism on beautiful suburban homes weeks before the election? 1.3032 0.04579 188 148 23 17
1044 Mom always said that not practicing would someday come back to haunt me. 1.3032 0.04190 188 142 35 11
1045 Let's just hope it's a Banksy. 1.3032 0.04324 188 144 31 13
1046 'I hear that the brass section took out a whole neighborhood in Springville." 1.3032 0.04257 188 143 33 12
1047 It’s ok, they are both rentals. 1.3027 0.04165 185 139 36 10
1048 I didn't think the movers were going to get that in the front door 1.3025 0.05141 119 89 24 6
1049 Well, you were right, it doesn't fit. 1.3021 0.04128 192 145 36 11
1050 Well, she did promise to bring down the house. 1.3021 0.03890 192 144 39 9
1051 Who did we piss off at ACME? 1.3016 0.04171 189 143 35 11
1052 I think if we tilt it to the left this time we can finally get it upstairs 1.3016 0.04034 189 141 39 9
1053 Proof of climate change 1.3011 0.04483 186 145 26 15
1054 Now I think we have enough keys to the house. 1.3011 0.03930 186 147 27 11
1055 The Day The music Died 1.3011 0.04146 186 140 36 10
1056 It will probably need to be tuned again now. 1.3011 0.04215 186 141 34 11
1057 I had no idea they could afford Frank Gehry 1.3011 0.04075 186 139 38 9
1058 You're right. It would look better in the den. 1.3011 0.04146 186 140 36 10
1059 Didn't you just say you didn't think this year could get much worse? 1.3011 0.04351 186 143 30 13
1060 Even worse, my insurance won't cover it, claiming forte majeure. 1.3011 0.04351 186 143 30 13
1061 At least the bagpipes were in the house at the time. 1.3011 0.04351 186 143 30 13
1062 Just when you think 2020 can't get any worse. 1.3011 0.04215 186 141 34 11
1063 Talk about your grand finale! 1.3011 0.04146 186 140 36 10
1064 But the forecast only said “Cats and dogs!” 1.3011 0.04351 186 143 30 13
1065 Now THAT was a performance that brought the house down. 1.3011 0.03458 186 141 38 7
1066 Drone delivery still needs a little fine tuning. 1.3011 0.04075 186 139 38 9
1067 I think we should have tipped the movers more. 1.3011 0.04075 186 139 38 9
1068 Kind of pretentious, don't you think? 1.3011 0.04417 186 144 28 14
1069 At least it was a no-contact delivery. 1.3011 0.04215 186 141 34 11
1070 They should have got the baby grand. 1.3011 0.04146 186 140 36 10
1071 Let’s stop wishing for things to end on a good note. 1.3011 0.04215 186 141 34 11
1072 Ohhh, so this is what the salesman meant by, 'It's on the house.' 1.3011 0.04075 186 139 38 9
1073 This is why they didn’t call it ‘Pianist on the Roof’. 1.3005 0.04400 183 141 29 13
1074 You suppose Farmers has seen this before? 1.3000 0.04010 180 133 40 7
1075 I told you the BABY grand. 1.2995 0.03985 187 139 40 8
1076 They said they’d drop off the keys. 1.2995 0.04127 187 141 36 10
1077 I think the stork mis-heard our request for a grand baby delivery! 1.2995 0.04196 187 142 34 11
1078 You can tell it's a Bosendorfer by the extra keys. 1.2995 0.03606 187 141 39 7
1079 ...well Dorothy, we’re not not in Kansas anymore. 1.2995 0.04331 187 144 30 13
1080 ... and YOU said it wouldn’t just fall from the sky” 1.2995 0.04196 187 142 34 11
1081 So the bench should be arriving tomorrow 1.2995 0.04331 187 144 30 13
1082 We don't need the grand piano rider," says you. 1.2989 0.04241 184 140 33 11
1083 I told you it wouldn’t fit in the living room. 1.2989 0.04025 184 137 39 8
1084 It's not every day you get a grand piano out of the blue. 1.2989 0.04098 184 138 37 9
1085 Oops. Oops....Did I hear an Angel say "Oops"? 1.2989 0.04310 184 141 31 12
1086 A bit too grand. 1.2989 0.04170 184 142 30 11
1087 Grand finale. 1.2989 0.04276 184 143 28 13
1088 This summer’s smash hit. 1.2989 0.03951 184 143 31 10
1089 Now I understand the blues 1.2989 0.04098 184 138 37 9
1090 Huh. And Mom always said if I didn't practice, I'd never bring the house down. 1.2989 0.04135 184 141 32 11
1091 I’ve been waiting for a sign to move to Canada... but I’m not sure this is it. 1.2989 0.04170 184 139 35 10
1092 I find it a bit derivative. 1.2989 0.04098 184 138 37 9
1093 We really should to talk to the landlord about the people upstairs. 1.2989 0.04241 184 140 33 11
1094 I had a feeling that piano tree was too close to the house. 1.2989 0.04170 184 139 35 10
1095 What can I say? It's 2020. 1.2989 0.04310 184 141 31 12
1096 That sounds right for 2020 1.2989 0.04446 184 143 27 14
1097 If you say this piano 'really brought down the house' one more time, I'm gonna kill you. 1.2989 0.04025 184 141 33 10
1098 I can’t remember how I got it in the other house. 1.2989 0.04310 184 141 31 12
1099 Wow, what a smashing performance. 1.2989 0.04025 184 139 36 9
1100 This is A Major disaster. 1.2989 0.04098 184 138 37 9
1101 They didn’t even bother to leave a note. 1.2989 0.04310 184 141 31 12
1102 We really should’ve seen this coming. 1.2989 0.03988 184 139 36 9
1103 I said to list it, not Listz. 1.2989 0.04241 184 140 33 11
1104 Well the neighbors did say they would drop in with some tunes. 1.2989 0.04512 184 144 25 15
1105 They track asteroids but not pianos. 1.2989 0.04331 174 132 32 10
1106 Alexa, piano tuners near me. 1.2989 0.04175 174 130 36 8
1107 That's why I play the flute. 1.2983 0.04358 181 139 30 12
1108 Not what I had in mind when I said "downscale." 1.2983 0.04142 181 136 36 9
1109 I did warn them that my concerts tend to bring down the house. 1.2983 0.04067 181 135 38 8
1110 It’ll cost more than a grand to fix this place up! 1.2983 0.04215 181 137 34 10
1111 That's nothing - the Thompson's house was crushed by a giant piccolo. 1.2983 0.04632 181 143 22 16
1112 Long ago a narcissist with tiny hands bought a baby grand. Unfortunately, that small piano also had an inflated ego, and became this monstrous white house destroyer. 1.2983 0.04428 181 140 28 13
1113 A disconcerting grand piano? 1.2983 0.04565 181 142 24 15
1114 It only cost me a grand! 1.2983 0.04287 181 138 32 11
1115 See? It wasn't a bird. 1.2983 0.04358 181 139 30 12
1116 Gesundheit 1.2982 0.04139 171 127 37 7
1117 Must have been a really big toon. 1.2978 0.04619 178 140 23 15
1118 You said you wanted to rent A Flat. 1.2973 0.04079 185 139 37 9
1119 Natural disasters are so passé. 1.2973 0.04151 185 140 35 10
1120 We can’t avoid it any longer- it’s time to face the music 1.2973 0.05054 111 82 25 4
1121 I told you I had a bad feeling about Hurricane Mozart 1.2971 0.04604 175 137 24 14
1122 You would think something with 88 keys would use the door! 1.2967 0.04048 182 136 38 8
1123 Now I understand why the realtor said this house was only one grand. 1.2967 0.03895 182 141 32 9
1124 Wow, that performance really brought down the house. 1.2967 0.04122 182 137 36 9
1125 I said “when you turn 13 you can drop piano” 1.2967 0.03895 182 134 42 6
1126 Well, we always said we wanted a house filled with music. 1.2967 0.03895 182 134 42 6
1127 Ahh, t'is grand, but it's not the instrument of God I was expecting 1.2967 0.03972 182 135 40 7
1128 Sometimes it feels like we're living in a cartoon. 1.2965 0.04587 172 134 25 13
1129 well, we'll need to go chopin for a new home 1.2965 0.04587 172 134 25 13
1130 They hired a deconstructivist architect for their remodel. 1.2961 0.04314 179 137 31 11
1131 Please don’t play it again, Sam. 1.2961 0.04314 179 137 31 11
1132 I've never seen a piano bring the house down 1.2961 0.04166 179 135 35 9
1133 Well, you're not going to believe this, but we're covered. 1.2961 0.04457 179 139 27 13
1134 That house, rising from nowhere, surely did some damage to our giant piano. 1.2961 0.04166 179 138 31 10
1135 We just have to face the music. 1.2961 0.04090 179 134 37 8
1136 If you try to play 'Piano Man' we're getting divorced. 1.2961 0.03771 179 142 29 8
1137 Well it is 2020 after all. 1.2961 0.04457 179 139 27 13
1138 Sam played it again and he really shouldn’t have. 1.2961 0.04314 179 137 31 11
1139 This one's under a grand. 1.2961 0.04387 179 138 29 12
1140 Should I be looking for the Ruby slippers kind of thing? 1.2961 0.04241 179 136 33 10
1141 At least we had free shipping. 1.2961 0.04090 179 136 34 9
1142 I guess we have to have it tuned now. 1.2961 0.04387 179 138 29 12
1143 I suppose the Chinese are responsible for this. 1.2961 0.04314 179 137 31 11
1144 It both broke a leg and brought the house down. 1.2961 0.04314 179 137 31 11
1145 We moved out of the city to AVOID comically-large falling pianos 1.2961 0.04241 179 136 33 10
1146 Honestly, this plague thing is just getting ridiculous 1.2961 0.04314 179 137 31 11
1147 They had to go with the grand. I told George the upright would fit. 1.2948 0.04636 173 136 23 14
1148 You can see why this concerto is so rarely heard in concert. 1.2948 0.04414 173 133 29 11
1149 At least we got it out of the basement. 1.2944 0.04293 180 138 31 11
1150 It'll probably need tuning now. 1.2944 0.03915 180 133 41 6
1151 Aren't you glad that we went to my mothers 1.2944 0.04436 180 140 27 13
1152 Definitely a housing crunch. 1.2944 0.04221 180 137 33 10
1153 Drop it off, you said. 1.2944 0.03994 180 136 36 8
1154 I say we list it on AirR&B. As is, no questions asked. 1.2938 0.04342 177 136 30 11
1155 Oh wow!! That cloud that looked like a piano was actually a piano. I mean, what are the odds? 1.2938 0.03955 177 131 40 6
1156 When Publisher's Clearing House Sweepstakes said we won a grand this is not what I was expecting. 1.2938 0.04487 177 138 26 13
1157 grand slam 1.2938 0.04487 177 138 26 13
1158 We should have gotten an upright. 1.2938 0.03955 177 131 40 6
1159 No wonder this house is going for a song. 1.2938 0.04487 177 138 26 13
1160 What a grand mess you’ve gotten us into, Stanley. 1.2938 0.04191 177 137 30 10
1161 Does our policy cover 'acts of God'? 1.2938 0.04558 177 139 24 14
1162 NASA says the Liberace satellite was launched in 1972. 1.2938 0.04191 177 134 34 9
1163 Maybe we should have gone with the spinet. 1.2938 0.03955 177 131 40 6
1164 Thank God, We heard the prelude. 1.2938 0.03873 177 130 42 5
1165 No one sticks baby grand in the corner. 1.2938 0.04191 177 134 34 9
1166 Yep, just like you said, using a drone delivery service owned by your ex was a great idea. 1.2938 0.04191 177 134 34 9
1167 A grand? It's going to cost more than that! 1.2938 0.04342 177 136 30 11
1168 It's funnier in cartoons. 1.2938 0.04035 177 132 38 7
1169 Good thing we bought that wind, hail and Steinway policy. 1.2938 0.04267 177 135 32 10
1170 I'd rather have an elephant in the room. 1.2938 0.04267 177 135 32 10
1171 You didn’t tip the movers, did you? 1.2938 0.04035 177 132 38 7
1172 I said I wanted a house with a driveway, not a steinway 1.2938 0.04114 177 133 36 8
1173 Check underneath for the Ruby slippers 1.2938 0.04191 177 136 31 10
1174 I guess you can say they brought the house down. 1.2938 0.04191 177 134 34 9
1175 It’s only March 1, but at least 2020 can’t possibly get any worse. 1.2938 0.04114 177 133 36 8
1176 Finally, a fitting finale for Beethoven’s Les Adieux! 1.2937 0.04742 143 109 26 8
1177 You're right Dorothy, were not in Beethoven's Piano Concerto anymore 1.2934 0.04439 167 128 29 10
1178 The first time may have been an accident, but this time ... 1.2931 0.04315 174 133 31 10
1179 That is the newly discovered John Cage piece. 1.2931 0.04315 174 133 31 10
1180 I hate to say it, but he really did bring the house down.. 1.2921 0.04016 178 133 38 7
1181 Must have been a helluva party. 1.2921 0.04094 178 134 36 8
1182 On the bright side, it was next-day delivery. 1.2921 0.04171 178 135 34 9
1183 Never underestimate the power of music. 1.2921 0.04171 178 137 31 10
1184 Well, that concert brought down the house. 1.2921 0.03854 178 135 36 7
1185 I still think the odds of the house being struck by lightening are higher 1.2921 0.04094 178 134 36 8
1186 Lesson learned - never take an Airbnb from Wile E Coyote 1.2914 0.03850 175 131 38 6
1187 WHAT DO YOU EXPECT WHEN THERE IS NO SUPPORT FOR THE ARTS ! 1.2914 0.04517 175 137 25 13
1188 Sounds flattened. 1.2914 0.04934 175 143 13 19
1189 I thought they played harps up there. 1.2914 0.04138 175 132 35 8
1190 When they said, "time to face the music," I didn't think... 1.2914 0.04294 175 134 31 10
1191 I blame this on Biden. 1.2914 0.04517 175 137 25 13
1192 Critics knew his performance would bring down the house 1.2914 0.04444 175 136 27 12
1193 It's a classical disaster 1.2914 0.04294 175 134 31 10
1194 Guess Beethoven didn't like his tenth! 1.2910 0.04717 134 101 27 6
1195 Thank goodness for Amazon Prime — we can send it back! 1.2907 0.04264 172 131 32 9
1196 I've called the police on the black keys. 1.2905 0.04443 179 140 26 13
1197 You said they do free returns if it's the wrong size, right? 1.2898 0.03957 176 131 39 6
1198 That’s the last time I pray for more culture in our lives. 1.2898 0.03614 176 139 30 6
1199 It was as if Beethoven rolled over. 1.2898 0.04272 176 137 28 11
1200 It's supposed to represent the fusion of music, architecture and deconstruction. 1.2890 0.04398 173 134 28 11
1201 The Grand Slam!! 1.2890 0.04474 173 135 26 12
1202 Well, that's just grand. Just grand. 1.2890 0.04162 173 131 34 8
1203 I’m afraid this portends climate change on a very grand scale. 1.2890 0.04162 173 131 34 8
1204 Don’t worry, I’ll get it delivered by a drone you said. 1.2890 0.04321 173 133 30 10
1205 Well, that’s A major problem. 1.2890 0.04321 173 133 30 10
1206 On the positive side it could’ve been the whole orchestra. 1.2890 0.04122 173 133 31 9
1207 Look under the piano - you'll find a struggling musician. 1.2890 0.03599 173 132 35 6
1208 Maybe I wasn't supposed to check both boxes, in-home & drone delivery. 1.2890 0.04081 173 130 36 7
1209 Perfect. Wake me up in 2021 will you? Hell, make it 2022. 1.2890 0.04321 173 133 30 10
1210 Looks like heaven is still "Harps Only" 1.2890 0.04242 173 132 32 9
1211 Was I supposed to pay the pianist for the wedding? 1.2890 0.04081 173 135 28 10
1212 The USPS wouldn’t have forgotten the stool. 1.2890 0.04398 173 137 24 12
1213 I hear it blew off the Steinway Building 1.2889 0.04567 135 101 29 5
1214 That's one way to pitch a roof. 1.2882 0.03952 170 126 39 5
1215 Now that's grand, isn't it? 1.2882 0.04449 170 132 27 11
1216 Throw a grand into the house, you said. 1.2882 0.04527 170 133 25 12
1217 It's interesting, but I like the melting clock better. 1.2882 0.04290 170 130 31 9
1218 I can see why they named it hurricane Bach. 1.2882 0.04290 170 130 31 9
1219 Some items just should not be delivered by drone. 1.2882 0.04449 170 132 27 11
1220 So that’s what they meant by contactless delivery 1.2882 0.04208 170 129 33 8
1221 And that’s what I’d call a ‘grand slam’ 1.2882 0.04449 170 132 27 11
1222 A little more to the left. 1.2882 0.04678 170 137 18 15
1223 Looks like the price of that house dropped by a grand... 1.2874 0.04339 167 128 30 9
1224 That house's wicked sister is going to be pissed. 1.2874 0.04451 174 136 26 12
1225 The piano loft lasted a full week. 1.2867 0.04471 150 114 29 7
1226 That's not what I thought our realtor meant when he said he'd like to Liszt our house. 1.2865 0.04426 171 133 27 11
1227 I wonder whether it fell, or was inside and just got really big. 1.2857 0.04479 168 131 26 11
1228 That’s not what I meant when I said we should fill the house with music 1.2857 0.03973 168 125 38 5
1229 Drone delivery has a way to go 1.2857 0.04399 168 130 28 10
1230 Hold on -- here comes an anvil. 1.2857 0.04479 168 131 26 11
1231 God said, 'It's my way or the Steinway,' and we blew it. 1.2857 0.04234 168 128 32 8
1232 I prefer the one with a tuba on it. 1.2857 0.04275 168 131 27 10
1233 Should we ring the doorbell? 1.2857 0.04558 168 132 24 12
1234 Photos of the bizarre weather incident struck a chord on social media, though local officials found most media coverage dissonant with the scale of the damage. 1.2857 0.04234 168 128 32 8
1235 Perfect pitch. 1.2857 0.04479 168 131 26 11
1236 Gotta adjust the scaling on the teleportation device. 1.2857 0.04399 168 130 28 10
1237 Concerto in F'd Major 1.2857 0.04635 168 133 22 13
1238 Fine, you were right, I guess it doesn't fit 1.2857 0.04234 168 128 32 8
1239 So, this is what the agent meant when he said there’s a problem with the keys to your new house. 1.2857 0.04712 168 134 20 14
1240 Well the realtor said we could buy it for a song. 1.2857 0.04558 168 132 24 12
1241 I told them not to use a helicopter. 1.2857 0.04234 168 134 23 11
1242 I knew it wouldn't fit on the roof. 1.2857 0.04600 133 100 28 5
1243 I'll bet you can buy the house now for a song. 1.2857 0.04317 168 129 30 9
1244 This is so David Byrne. 1.2857 0.04234 168 128 32 8
1245 And it’s only a block away from the nearest metronome stop. 1.2857 0.04234 168 128 32 8
1246 Lucky you, the price just dropped by a grand. 1.2857 0.04275 168 131 27 10
1247 If 2020 were a music instrument. 1.2857 0.04479 168 131 26 11
1248 Frank Gehry's lost his mind. 1.2848 0.04282 165 126 31 8
1249 Still, you can't top that for a smashing crescendo. 1.2840 0.04212 169 132 28 9
1250 No, the anvil was 2016, it was the safe in 2002. 1.2840 0.04295 169 130 30 9
1251 Must be Tuesday. 1.2840 0.04376 169 131 28 10
1252 It’s okay... the insurance on the piano is worth more than the house. 1.2837 0.04309 141 105 32 4
1253 First an El Niño, now an El Piano!? 1.2837 0.04425 141 106 30 5
1254 They did say the piano was too big for the house. 1.2836 0.04691 134 102 26 6
1255 It's not a classically noisy neighborhood" 1.2836 0.04570 134 101 28 5
1256 It's the wrong color. 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1257 And you thought south-facing windows were bad feng shui. 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1258 This happens every autumn during the giant Steinway migration. 1.2831 0.04668 166 132 21 13
1259 Nothing minor about it, if you ask me. 1.2831 0.04589 166 131 23 12
1260 The worst part is our policy only covers upright pianos. 1.2831 0.04428 166 129 27 10
1261 Apparently God got tired of Jesus playing Chopsticks. 1.2831 0.04428 166 129 27 10
1262 Do you think the insurance company will claim it’s an act of God? 1.2831 0.04428 166 129 27 10
1263 ...”And we covered it!” 1.2831 0.04509 166 130 25 11
1264 The performance certainly brought the house down. 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1265 Now we’ll probably have to get it tuned 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1266 I thought they stopped putting lounge pianos in 747s. 1.2831 0.03994 166 124 37 5
1267 It’s really not that grand. 1.2831 0.04509 166 130 25 11
1268 Those Amazon drones are getting out of hand. 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1269 Grand entrance 1.2831 0.04428 166 129 27 10
1270 Well, you said you wanted to upscale. 1.2831 0.04589 166 131 23 12
1271 Help me find the key. 1.2831 0.04428 166 129 27 10
1272 I told you we shouldn’t have rented to Wile E. Coyote. 1.2831 0.03994 166 130 30 6
1273 Well, that struck a familiar chord. 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1274 Do we get to keep it? 1.2831 0.04509 166 130 25 11
1275 Apparently it was a drone delivery 1.2831 0.04509 166 130 25 11
1276 I guess drone deliveries are not full proofafter all. 1.2831 0.04084 166 125 35 6
1277 I knew that drone delivery wouldn't work. 1.2831 0.03507 166 129 31 6
1278 My bad. 1.2831 0.04509 166 130 25 11
1279 Well, I think it is safe to assume that was the Grand Finale. 1.2831 0.04259 166 127 31 8
1280 Not a bang or a whimper. The world ends with a C Major chord. 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1281 Who is going to tell Billy Joel? 1.2831 0.04509 166 130 25 11
1282 Yeah, but drone delivery was a lot less expensive. 1.2831 0.04668 166 132 21 13
1283 The Weather Channel never said anything about 'over the rainbow'. 1.2831 0.04259 166 127 31 8
1284 Well I found my keys. 1.2831 0.04173 166 126 33 7
1285 I thought they only played harps 1.2831 0.04259 166 127 31 8
1286 Definitely not a well tempered clavier! 1.2831 0.04509 166 130 25 11
1287 And we just had it tuned, too. 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1288 They usually burn up on re-entry! 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1289 Apparently drone delivery still has a few kinks. 1.2831 0.04509 166 130 25 11
1290 That's quite a crashendo! 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1291 It definitely does not strike the right note. 1.2831 0.04259 166 127 31 8
1292 It must have been a hell of a performance --- it brought the house down. 1.2831 0.04509 166 130 25 11
1293 My architect wanted the deconstruction to have a certain lyricism. 1.2831 0.04509 166 130 25 11
1294 Would you look at that? Keys are by the door. 1.2831 0.04428 166 129 27 10
1295 Make a note of it. 1.2831 0.04259 166 127 31 8
1296 When I asked you to drop a grand for the downpayment, this isn't what I had in mind. 1.2831 0.04428 166 131 24 11
1297 That was definitely a smashing performance. 1.2831 0.04428 166 129 27 10
1298 The Lord works in mysterious Steinways... 1.2831 0.04259 166 127 31 8
1299 It looked a lot smaller when I ordered it online. 1.2831 0.03994 166 124 37 5
1300 I guess a piano can be a wind instrument. 1.2831 0.04428 166 129 27 10
1301 Impressive. It’s the 2020 Edition Steinway. 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1302 And our final entrant for the 2020 calendar shoot... 1.2831 0.04084 166 125 35 6
1303 Things are really looking up 1.2831 0.04822 166 134 17 15
1304 What’d you think? I call it ‘A Requiem for 2020’. 1.2831 0.04428 166 129 27 10
1305 And they say climate change isn’t real 1.2831 0.04259 166 127 31 8
1306 You don’t even play. 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
1307 There’s got to be a story... 1.2831 0.04173 166 126 33 7
1308 At least it's not raining! Moisture would really ruin the piano. 1.2831 0.04259 166 129 28 9
1309 We really should have kept our home insurance policy. 1.2831 0.04746 166 133 19 14
1310 They dropped it on the wrong White House. 1.2831 0.04509 166 128 25 11
1311 I don't think we should stick around for the encore. 1.2822 0.04481 163 127 26 10
1312 Hurricane Rachmaninov. Who’d a thunk? 1.2822 0.04309 163 125 30 8
1313 Don't worry, honey. I'm going to give them only one star for delivery. 1.2822 0.04396 163 126 28 9
1314 The piano brought down the house, I see. 1.2822 0.04129 163 123 34 6
1315 I think the luxury airliners are cutting back. 1.2822 0.04565 163 128 24 11
1316 Well, I guess we faced the music 1.2822 0.04309 163 125 30 8
1317 Grand, simply grand.. 1.2822 0.04396 163 126 28 9
1318 Sometimes you have to be careful of what you wish for 1.2822 0.04129 163 123 34 6
1319 I told you not to say Beethoven's better than Chopin out loud. 1.2822 0.04309 163 125 30 8
1320 In hindsight, my prayer for help finding the keys could have been more specific. 1.2822 0.04396 163 126 28 9
1321 An upright would've made more sense. 1.2822 0.03844 163 126 32 5
1322 It is why angels should stick to harps. 1.2822 0.04036 163 122 36 5
1323 Step back, here comes the cellist! 1.2822 0.04129 163 123 34 6
1324 Time to face the music, Max. 1.2822 0.04309 163 125 30 8
1325 Which key for the front door? 1.2822 0.04396 163 126 28 9
1326 I wondered why it said "Free Shipping". 1.2822 0.04129 163 126 30 7
1327 Looks like we have A major problem: we lost the key to the flat! 1.2822 0.04220 163 124 32 7
1328 I agree, drop ship was the wrong option to have picked 1.2822 0.04129 163 123 34 6
1329 I wonder how big his pianist is 1.2822 0.04396 163 126 28 9
1330 I call it "Requiem in b flat." 1.2822 0.04647 163 129 22 12
1331 Evidently, these drone deliveries have grown beyond their capabilities. 1.2822 0.04728 163 130 20 13
1332 I told you I heard music 1.2822 0.04129 163 123 34 6
1333 I heard a terrible roar, the first three measures of Grieg's Concerto in A Minor, and just made it to the back door. 1.2822 0.04309 163 130 22 11
1334 Well, so much for Feng shui. 1.2822 0.04396 163 126 28 9
1335 So I said to Gulliver play me something striking 1.2822 0.04647 163 129 22 12
1336 Is this what you'd call a music “download”? 1.2822 0.04129 163 123 34 6
1337 It’s a hit! 1.2822 0.03794 163 127 29 7
1338 Of all the Steinways in all the airplanes in all the world, it falls into ours." 1.2822 0.04220 163 124 32 7
1339 And somehow it spared your banjo. 1.2822 0.04309 163 125 30 8
1340 I'm worried it's out of tune now. 1.2822 0.03941 163 121 38 4
1341 Apparently He got fed up with practicing, too. 1.2822 0.04481 163 127 26 10
1342 Well, that speaker at the Republican convention did warn us. 1.2822 0.04220 163 124 32 7
1343 and thats why you should tip the moving company guys 1.2822 0.04129 163 128 26 9
1344 Grand Finale you say? 1.2822 0.04220 163 124 32 7
1345 Now our grand piano insurance will really go through the roof 1.2822 0.04565 163 128 24 11
1346 I feel like we should have seen this coming. 1.2822 0.04129 163 123 34 6
1347 But this one has a finished basement. 1.2822 0.04220 163 124 32 7
1348 I'm pretty sure I ordered a *baby* grand. 1.2821 0.04795 156 124 20 12
1349 They could have at least dropped us a note. 1.2821 0.04708 156 123 22 11
1350 Derecho in F major 1.2821 0.04197 156 120 29 7
1351 I told him I thought a drone delivery wasn’t a good idea. 1.2821 0.04436 156 120 28 8
1352 They listed it as a split level. 1.2815 0.04661 135 103 26 6
1353 I feel a song coming on... 1.2814 0.04404 167 130 27 10
1354 Looks like the Steinways are moving in. 1.2814 0.04404 167 130 27 10
1355 We should have sprung for a piano mover. 1.2814 0.03882 167 124 39 4
1356 Drone delivery still has some kinks. 1.2814 0.04237 167 128 31 8
1357 Isn't life grand? 1.2805 0.04372 164 127 28 9
1358 Way to bring down the House... 1.2805 0.03571 164 126 33 5
1359 That is not good feng shui. 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1360 That genie was hard of hearing. I wished for PENNIES from heaven! 1.2805 0.04372 164 127 28 9
1361 I heard that one coming 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1362 No, no. Definitely A-flat MAJOR. 1.2805 0.04622 164 130 22 12
1363 Apparently I accepted that it would be delivered via drop shopping. 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1364 Well this really strikes a chord 1.2805 0.04197 164 125 32 7
1365 I was sure taking the door off was the answer. 1.2805 0.04540 164 129 24 11
1366 Hope Dorothy & Toto got out..... 1.2805 0.04286 164 126 30 8
1367 Well, he did say that his performance would bring down the house. 1.2805 0.04197 164 125 32 7
1368 I've heard of bringing the house down, but I never expected this! 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1369 At least it didn't land on a wicked witch. 1.2805 0.04197 164 125 32 7
1370 Now that’s what I call piano forte! 1.2805 0.04329 164 129 25 10
1371 "Last notes I heard, before it hit, sounded like 'Somewhere, over the rainbow'"! 1.2805 0.04540 164 129 24 11
1372 Apparently the pilot heard "Jettison the fugue". 1.2805 0.04540 164 129 24 11
1373 It's hurricane season. Last year it was a cow. 1.2805 0.04372 164 127 28 9
1374 I've heard of Air Guitar, but this is a first for Air Piano! 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1375 I thought this happened only in cartoons 1.2805 0.04286 164 126 30 8
1376 Hum, would this be accidental? 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1377 Maybe delivery by drone wasn't such a good idea after all. 1.2805 0.04107 164 124 34 6
1378 Insurance says we're only covered in the event of organs and harpsichords. 1.2805 0.04015 164 123 36 5
1379 Well, they did say Ted always brought the house down with his piano performances. 1.2805 0.04107 164 124 34 6
1380 It's your turn. I had to tell Elton the last time this happened. 1.2805 0.03968 164 125 33 6
1381 I’m kind of happy that we didn’t paint the bathroom. 1.2805 0.04197 164 125 32 7
1382 Diminuendo, don’t you think? 1.2805 0.04372 164 127 28 9
1383 They don't quite have drone delivery nailed yet. 1.2805 0.04015 164 123 36 5
1384 I still think bigger is better 1.2805 0.04197 164 125 32 7
1385 Fuge this 1.2805 0.03968 164 130 25 9
1386 Is there a wireless version? 1.2805 0.04935 164 134 14 16
1387 Well, that didn’t go as planned. 1.2805 0.04286 164 126 30 8
1388 It’s going to need re-tuning. 1.2805 0.04286 164 126 30 8
1389 I should have been more precise when I told them to send the house keys. 1.2805 0.03465 164 125 35 4
1390 The piano has been drinking; not me. 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1391 I asked for Stucco not Staccato! 1.2805 0.04015 164 123 36 5
1392 I have to say, genie, that your shipping service leaves to be desired. 1.2805 0.04622 164 130 22 12
1393 Those drone deliveries need a little work. 1.2805 0.04107 164 124 34 6
1394 On second thought, you can keep the house. 1.2805 0.04107 164 124 34 6
1395 No, I specifically requested a giant organ. 1.2805 0.04622 164 130 22 12
1396 President Trump just tweeted that without him, the pianos would have been a lot bigger. 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1397 Why did I buy the house? Well what’s the chance of that happening again? 1.2805 0.04107 164 126 31 7
1398 Well it’s a grand gesture, I’ll give God that. 1.2805 0.04372 164 127 28 9
1399 2020’s Magnum Opus 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1400 Unfortunately our insurance only covers damages caused by anvils. 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1401 They said that there was only a 0.41% chance. Yes dear, but this is 2020. 1.2805 0.04286 164 126 30 8
1402 Well, on the plus side we have a piano now 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1403 I chose “surprise me” for demolition methods.. 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
1404 I told you a sequel to"Fiddler on the Roof" wouldn't work... 1.2795 0.04511 161 126 25 10
1405 That's odd. It sounded just like a freight train. 1.2795 0.04153 161 122 33 6
1406 Well, I guess we don’t have to worry about paying the babysitter. 1.2788 0.04597 165 131 22 12
1407 Okay, you're right, a keyboard would have been a better choice. 1.2788 0.04086 165 125 34 6
1408 That's what I call "bringing the house down" 1.2788 0.04349 165 128 28 9
1409 Still think my insurance guy sold us a policy we didn’t need? 1.2778 0.04865 126 97 23 6
1410 'The only occupant was the owner, a mister Wile E. Coyote.' 1.2778 0.04400 162 125 27 9
1411 See? That right there is exactly why ya don't buy a house next to a music school on tornado row. 1.2778 0.04571 162 128 23 11
1412 Terrible what the storm did to the Keys 1.2778 0.04312 162 125 29 8
1413 Aw Man, my banjo was in there 1.2778 0.04312 162 125 29 8
1414 Ironically, it sounded like a beautiful B flat when it hit. 1.2778 0.04222 162 124 31 7
1415 You said B♭, right? 1.2778 0.04400 162 126 27 9
1416 I KNEW we should never have put Trump in charge of pianos. 1.2778 0.04571 162 128 23 11
1417 And you told me it was stupid to insure against acts of God. 1.2778 0.04131 162 123 33 6
1418 I don't think our insurance covers 'Acts of Beethoven' 1.2778 0.04487 162 127 25 10
1419 Who did you hire to move it, Laurel and Hardy? 1.2778 0.04312 162 125 29 8
1420 Not quite what I meant when I asked you to drop off the house keys.. 1.2778 0.04487 162 127 25 10
1421 2020 season finale. 1.2778 0.04487 162 127 25 10
1422 This morning our house was upright, now we have a Grand. 1.2778 0.04222 162 124 31 7
1423 What pandemic? 1.2778 0.04131 162 123 33 6
1424 Are you sure that’s our piano? 1.2778 0.04312 162 125 29 8
1425 I’ve heard about the power of music before, but nothing like this. 1.2778 0.04312 162 125 29 8
1426 I thought Jim Cantore said it was going to rain cats and dogs. 1.2778 0.04222 162 124 31 7
1427 Amazon needs to perfect it's drone delivery. 1.2778 0.04400 162 126 27 9
1428 That's a pianoforte. Apparently, there is a difference. 1.2778 0.04487 162 127 25 10
1429 Don’t even think of playing your World’s Smallest Violin this time. 1.2778 0.04654 162 129 21 12
1430 Hmmm ... I owe you $10 1.2778 0.04312 162 125 29 8
1431 ...So powerful. It really brought down the house... 1.2778 0.04131 162 123 33 6
1432 Well, that is just grand, isn't it? 1.2778 0.04487 162 127 25 10
1433 I've always heard you need specialized piano movers. An expensive lesson learned. 1.2778 0.04487 162 127 25 10
1434 A devastating coda.” 1.2770 0.04479 148 114 27 7
1435 The house looked bigger on-line. 1.2767 0.04363 159 123 28 8
1436 Ugh, it's flat 1.2767 0.04542 159 125 24 10
1437 Oh yeah? Well maybe the house was too small! 1.2767 0.04453 159 124 26 9
1438 They don't make beanstalks like they used to. 1.2767 0.04363 159 123 28 8
1439 That's a BIG baby. 1.2767 0.04363 159 123 28 8
1440 Beethoven's Tenth. 1.2767 0.04317 159 125 25 9
1441 This is WAY more than I expected from Hurricane Gershwin 1.2767 0.04629 159 126 22 11
1442 .....And you had to say what else could happen in 2020 ?? 1.2767 0.04453 159 124 26 9
1443 Honey, I still say you have the biggest organ on the block. 1.2767 0.04798 159 128 18 13
1444 - Well, isn't that great?! - No, I think it's grand. 1.2767 0.04453 159 124 26 9
1445 Still mad I didn't get around to replacing the roof tiles? 1.2767 0.04453 159 124 26 9
1446 You call the realtor, I'll call the piano tuner. 1.2767 0.04453 159 124 26 9
1447 More of a 'crash'endo I guess. 1.2767 0.04798 159 128 18 13
1448 Still need to work out some kinks in delivery by drone. 1.2767 0.04453 159 124 26 9
1449 The Florida Keys 1.2767 0.04629 159 126 22 11
1450 You can't blame God. I never much liked piano practice either. 1.2767 0.04453 159 124 26 9
1451 That was some crescendo 1.2767 0.04271 159 121 30 7
1452 I miss the old days when angels just played harps 1.2767 0.04363 159 123 28 8
1453 Sure, grands sound better, but an electronic keyboard would have only taken out the front door. 1.2767 0.04271 159 122 30 7
1454 Moving performance---but too many dropped notes. 1.2767 0.04271 159 122 30 7
1455 What did we ever do to Liberace? 1.2767 0.04542 159 125 24 10
1456 Oh my heavens, banging the first four notes of Beethoven’s Fifth would do it! 1.2767 0.04714 159 127 20 12
1457 Wow! Music really did bring the house down! 1.2767 0.04542 159 125 24 10
1458 I guess I should have told the movers to check the fit before putting it in the living room. 1.2767 0.04880 159 129 16 14
1459 That’s some piano forte. 1.2767 0.04629 159 126 22 11
1460 It has a grand entrance, but the place is a wreck. 1.2767 0.04271 159 122 30 7
1461 It's B Flat Major 1.2767 0.04629 159 126 22 11
1462 I’m thinking “more cowbell…” 1.2767 0.04453 159 124 26 9
1463 There must be a lesson in this. 1.2767 0.04363 159 123 28 8
1464 I told you the piece had a big finish. 1.2767 0.04177 159 121 32 6
1465 I knew I left something on the stove. 1.2767 0.04363 159 125 25 9
1466 Just because he slapped the name "innovative" on it didn't mean it would fly 1.2767 0.04542 159 125 24 10
1467 I think Beethoven took the advice to "rollover". 1.2767 0.04363 159 125 25 9
1468 Well, you did tell them to put it anywhere. 1.2767 0.04177 159 121 32 6
1469 It’s as good a metaphor as any. 1.2767 0.04080 159 120 34 5
1470 I told you it was only a matter of time until ‘free delivery’ lost quality control. 1.2767 0.04542 159 125 24 10
1471 Looks like our home gonna b-flat 1.2767 0.04798 159 128 18 13
1472 I’ve heard they rarely strike the same place twice 1.2767 0.04363 159 123 28 8
1473 I told you something horrible would happen if you didn't forward that chain of emails 1.2767 0.04453 159 124 26 9
1474 When they said they were going to “drop us a note” I didn’t expect the whole scale. 1.2767 0.04363 159 126 25 8
1475 I told the stork it would be grand if we had a Baby! 1.2767 0.04542 159 125 24 10
1476 Honey, we’re in treble. 1.2761 0.04546 163 129 23 11
1477 They're only asking a song for this fixer upper! 1.2756 0.04321 156 120 29 7
1478 See, I told you that it would fit. 1.2752 0.04652 149 117 23 9
1479 Grand Opening 1.2750 0.04248 160 125 27 8
1480 If I had it to do over again, I wouldn't have them drop-ship it. 1.2750 0.04517 160 126 24 10
1481 Needs tuning 1.2750 0.04603 160 127 22 11
1482 Well, they promised free delivery. 1.2750 0.04248 160 123 30 7
1483 Newly Liszt-ed real estate 1.2750 0.04429 160 125 26 9
1484 They said, "Bring the house down." So I did. 1.2750 0.04429 160 125 26 9
1485 Now that's what we call a 2020 Grand Slam! 1.2750 0.04603 160 127 22 11
1486 B-flat. Definitely, B-flat. 1.2750 0.04248 160 123 30 7
1487 You said you wanted to learn the piano, Phil. I would consider this a sign. 1.2750 0.04248 160 123 30 7
1488 On the bright side, they did yell to look out below. 1.2750 0.04248 160 123 30 7
1489 Tell Elton that Rocket Man routine is wearing thin. 1.2750 0.04248 160 123 30 7
1490 All I remember hearing was a crash, followed by a very dissonant chord. 1.2750 0.04248 160 123 30 7
1491 Somehow, "goodness, gracious" just doesn't get at the severity of the situation. 1.2750 0.04429 160 125 26 9
1492 I think that was scored as a descending glissando followed by a crash 1.2750 0.04339 160 124 28 8
1493 I objected to the delivery charges so they said it would be on the house. 1.2750 0.04248 160 123 30 7
1494 Well I guess that Wile E. always warned us up that this could happen 1.2750 0.04248 160 123 30 7
1495 You’re in big treble 1.2750 0.04429 160 125 26 9
1496 That’s what we get for buying a house in 2020. 1.2740 0.04613 146 114 24 8
1497 Music, it transcends boundaries 1.2739 0.04201 157 120 31 6
1498 Well, they do say, "Architecture is music frozen in time." 1.2739 0.04483 157 123 25 9
1499 I have a feeling Dorothy isn't in Carnegie Hall anymore. 1.2739 0.04053 157 121 30 6
1500 It's ornamental. I can't actually play. 1.2739 0.04201 157 120 31 6
1501 Well, so much for the wicked pianist of the west. 1.2739 0.04748 157 126 19 12
1502 Did you measure in feet or centimeters? 1.2739 0.04201 157 126 22 9
1503 And not a cloud in the sky. 1.2739 0.04573 157 124 23 10
1504 I guess when you're talking about pianists, size does matter. 1.2739 0.04483 157 123 25 9
1505 I left my phone inside. 1.2739 0.04391 157 122 27 8
1506 It's listed as "classical period architecture." 1.2739 0.04748 157 126 19 12
1507 And on that note, 2020 makes an early fall appearance. 1.2739 0.04297 157 121 29 7
1508 When I ordered cut-rate air delivery, I should have read the fine print. 1.2739 0.04297 157 121 29 7
1509 Whatever, but I still don't think it's a baby grand. 1.2739 0.04297 157 121 29 7
1510 Isn’t it just grand? 1.2739 0.04573 157 124 23 10
1511 We could dwell on this forever! But does there really have to be an explanation? 1.2739 0.04573 157 124 23 10
1512 That last number really brought the house down. 1.2739 0.04391 157 122 27 8
1513 I asked God for a sign if I should follow my dream of becoming a concert pianist 1.2739 0.04662 157 125 21 11
1514 They did say he’d bring the house down. 1.2739 0.04573 157 124 23 10
1515 NO!! I said "FIDDLER" on the roof. 1.2739 0.04573 157 124 23 10
1516 I had a feeling drone delivery was a bad idea. 1.2739 0.04483 157 123 25 9
1517 You never think a piano's gonna fall out of the sky, yet here we are. 1.2739 0.04391 157 122 27 8
1518 Was the overnight delivery extra? 1.2739 0.04483 157 123 25 9
1519 Now that's something you don't see every day. 1.2739 0.04391 157 122 27 8
1520 They've got a few links to work out on this "drone delivery"idea. 1.2739 0.04483 157 123 25 9
1521 Well, they said we were getting the keys today. 1.2739 0.04483 157 123 25 9
1522 What would happen if a piano landed on your house? It would B-flat. 1.2739 0.04483 157 123 25 9
1523 Don't worry, honey, some day it will just disappear. 1.2739 0.04483 157 123 25 9
1524 Talk about bringing down the house! 1.2739 0.04201 157 120 31 6
1525 I’m happy we survived, but mostly just shocked we slept through that.” 1.2739 0.04483 157 123 25 9
1526 Huh, guess you were right. It does make the space feel smaller. 1.2739 0.04662 157 125 21 11
1527 Unfortunately, ma’am, your policy only covers anvils and pre-existing pianos. 1.2739 0.04662 157 125 21 11
1528 Which one of the kids ordered a piano without our permission? 1.2739 0.03683 157 126 25 6
1529 At least I kept the receipt ! 1.2739 0.04391 157 122 27 8
1530 Well of course this happens the day I get it tuned. 1.2739 0.04297 157 121 29 7
1531 This delivery better be on the house! 1.2739 0.04002 157 122 29 6
1532 And to think, it all started when the old witch swallowed the fly. 1.2733 0.03578 161 125 31 5
1533 When I asked for a sign, I was thinking more flickering light bulb. 1.2727 0.04445 154 120 26 8
1534 Should we call FEMA or the NEA? 1.2727 0.04632 154 122 22 10
1535 Amazing that none of the keys fits the door. 1.2727 0.04722 154 123 20 11
1536 Black keys matter. 1.2727 0.04348 154 119 28 7
1537 I thought this only happened in 'The New Yorker.' 1.2727 0.04348 154 119 28 7
1538 Location,location,location! 1.2727 0.04539 154 121 24 9
1539 do re me fe ma 1.2727 0.04722 154 123 20 11
1540 drone deliver fail 1.2727 0.04445 154 120 26 8
1541 I TOLD Jack, “Don’t climb that beanstalk! You’ll upset the giant!” 1.2727 0.04632 154 122 22 10
1542 Just yesterday I was thinking that this probably wouldn't happen. 1.2727 0.04199 154 120 27 7
1543 Jeesh!! I thought locusts would be next. 1.2727 0.04445 154 120 26 8
1544 I told you not to move to the slapstick neighborhood! 1.2727 0.04348 154 119 28 7
1545 This is not really what I meant when I asked you to drop off the keys. 1.2727 0.04985 154 126 14 14
1546 Now I'll have to tune it all over again. 1.2727 0.04348 154 119 28 7
1547 It went from C major to Richter. 1.2727 0.04539 154 121 24 9
1548 We could pick up this place for a song. 1.2727 0.04249 154 118 30 6
1549 Maybe they should rethink the Steinway delivery drone. 1.2727 0.04348 154 119 28 7
1550 Crashendo or diminuendo? 1.2727 0.04632 154 122 22 10
1551 It brought the house down. 1.2727 0.04249 154 120 27 7
1552 that rocking robin in the treetops stuff has to stop. 1.2727 0.04539 154 121 24 9
1553 I bet you we can get this place for a song. 1.2727 0.04632 154 122 22 10
1554 ... and they delivered it to the wrong address! 1.2727 0.04348 154 119 28 7
1555 Looks like it brought the house down. 1.2727 0.04348 154 119 28 7
1556 And this is the childhood home of John Cage. 1.2727 0.04348 154 121 25 8
1557 Maybe too pianissimo? 1.2727 0.04574 132 101 26 5
1558 What’s next? Locusts? 1.2727 0.04445 154 120 26 8
1559 Hurricane Chopin was everything I expected. 1.2727 0.04445 154 120 26 8
1560 Note taken. 1.2727 0.04632 154 122 22 10
1561 That’s what he gets for writing a bad review. 1.2727 0.04539 154 121 24 9
1562 I told you it was gonna be too big for the house. 1.2722 0.04178 158 121 31 6
1563 I know I said 'overnight delivery' and not 'overhead delivery'! 1.2722 0.04273 158 122 29 7
1564 Bet they didn’t see that coming. 1.2722 0.04367 158 123 27 8
1565 I never really trusted cloud storage... 1.2722 0.04635 158 126 21 11
1566 I told you we should’ve gotten an upright. 1.2722 0.03980 158 119 35 4
1567 'fixer-upper' might be an over-sell 1.2722 0.04635 158 126 21 11
1568 How are we going to flip it now? 1.2721 0.04605 136 105 25 6
1569 I really wish they would stop counting the holes in Blackburn, Lancashire. 1.2710 0.04513 155 122 24 9
1570 It's a bit late now to question the efficacy of having our Bosendorfer Imperial Concert Grand delivered by drone... 1.2710 0.04323 155 120 28 7
1571 I think we should send it back. It’s damaged. 1.2710 0.04323 155 120 28 7
1572 How can they afford a Steinway? 1.2707 0.04789 133 104 22 7
1573 And that's why they call it a pianoforte. 1.2704 0.04250 159 123 29 7
1574 Do you think there is an angel sitting on a piano bench feeling really sheepish right now?" 1.2703 0.04456 148 115 26 7
1575 So this is what a hurricane is like in the Keys. 1.2701 0.04335 137 104 29 4
1576 And on top of everything else, they forgot to include the bench 1.2697 0.04172 152 116 31 5
1577 A Concert Grand just wouldn't do, oh no you just had to "Super Size" it didn't you? 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1578 I always did want to replace that door.... 1.2697 0.04066 152 115 33 4
1579 His playing certainly brought down the house. 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1580 This is why we moved out of the city in the first place! 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1581 This is the kind of thing I thought we left in the city. 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1582 It happened right after that little bird ran by. 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1583 At least the piano was insured. 1.2697 0.04275 152 117 29 6
1584 I guess we went a little too grand 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1585 The cause of the crash was an instrument failure on takeoff. 1.2697 0.04275 152 117 29 6
1586 I really would have expected a harp or a lyre 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1587 I thought we ordered the upright? 1.2697 0.04119 152 118 28 6
1588 Well. Now that that's installed, we should discuss WiFi. 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1589 Our insurance agent says we're covered for baby grands but unfortunately not for concert grands. 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1590 Don't even say it, Susan. You were right, we should have listened to that damn realtor when she warned us this might happen if we bought the house in between the coyote and roadrunner 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1591 Just when you thought 2020 couldn't get any worse... 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1592 I was afraid something like this would happen when Roadrunner moved next door! 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1593 Well that is a grand way to end 2020. 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1594 You were right, it is a little too big. 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1595 This one's on the house. 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1596 We’ll have to get it tuned again. 1.2697 0.04172 152 116 31 5
1597 The real estate agent had a surprisingly perfect pitch. 1.2697 0.04570 152 120 23 9
1598 There was a one percent chance of piano precipitation today. 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1599 I believe the correct musical term is crescendo 1.2697 0.03957 152 114 35 3
1600 And everyone thought he just raised beans. But who knew Jack played the piano? 1.2697 0.04570 152 120 23 9
1601 Say what you want, but nothing sounds like Steinway. 1.2697 0.03902 152 121 24 7
1602 It has 88 keys, but none of them opened the front door. 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1603 I’m Donald Trump and I approve this message. 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1604 Frankly, I prefer cats and dogs 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1605 Well now, ain't THAT grand. 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1606 Good heavens! Don’t they like Chopin up there? 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1607 Don't worry" the real estate agent said. "The Gullivers will make great neighbors" 1.2697 0.04275 152 117 29 6
1608 Now that’s a grand entrance if I’ve ever seen one! 1.2697 0.04570 152 120 23 9
1609 We just asked their kid to stop practicing! 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1610 You're more likely to be struck by lightning 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1611 You know, Jerry Lee Lewis lived upstairs 1.2697 0.04066 152 115 33 4
1612 This is what I get for dropping my Prime membership. 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1613 Well, this is grand. 1.2697 0.04066 152 115 33 4
1614 We'll definitely have to get it tuned. 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1615 That's what I call a crashing crescendo! 1.2697 0.04275 152 117 29 6
1616 Good thing we only ordered a baby Grand 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1617 Funny. It sounded just like a b-flat when it hit. 1.2697 0.04172 152 116 31 5
1618 Piano, forte; house, not so much. 1.2697 0.04570 152 120 23 9
1619 I guess having a rooftop concert wasn’t such a good idea. 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1620 Good thing it was only a baby grand 1.2697 0.04275 152 117 29 6
1621 Wow, that's a concert that brought down the house! 1.2697 0.04275 152 121 23 8
1622 Maybe we should have gone with the fiddler. 1.2697 0.04066 152 115 33 4
1623 Yeah, that performance definitely brought the house down. 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1624 Well, we always wanted a grand entrance. 1.2697 0.04172 152 116 31 5
1625 * Not to scale. 1.2697 0.04665 152 121 21 10
1626 The Hendersons always need to flaunt it. 1.2697 0.04757 152 122 19 11
1627 They have seen a thing or two. We are covered. 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1628 Oh great! I just fixed those steps 1.2697 0.04275 152 117 29 6
1629 I told you it was building to a crescendo. 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1630 Damn, and we just had the house tuned! 1.2697 0.04223 152 119 26 7
1631 I know I shouldn’t have, but the movers said that tipping was mandatory.” 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1632 Is it just me or is the scale a bit off? 1.2697 0.04275 152 117 29 6
1633 Just our luck, a concert grand. The one instrument we're not covered for. 1.2697 0.04275 152 117 29 6
1634 First we have COVID-19, then killer hornets 🐝 and then hurricanes and now flying pianos???? 🎹 1.2697 0.04172 152 116 31 5
1635 I just love this artist’s stuff, what’s this piece called?” “2020: It Could Be Worse 1.2697 0.04325 152 120 24 8
1636 Remember when I said that moving into giant country wasn't a good idea? 1.2697 0.04474 152 119 25 8
1637 We should have chosen contactless delivery 1.2697 0.04848 152 123 17 12
1638 The housing market has been ruined by financial instruments 1.2697 0.04757 152 122 19 11
1639 ‘Ya know- 2020...what do you expect at this point 1.2697 0.04172 152 116 31 5
1640 I think I left my keys on the counter 1.2697 0.04375 152 118 27 7
1641 I think we're out of tune with climate change. 1.2696 0.04508 115 86 27 2
1642 I didn’t order it. 1.2680 0.04148 153 117 31 5
1643 This looks like a bad case of pianist envy. 1.2680 0.04637 153 122 21 10
1644 How much does a Steinway? 1.2680 0.04350 153 119 27 7
1645 I don't see a bench. 1.2680 0.04544 153 121 23 9
1646 You know the insurance company's gonna to try to call this an Act of God. 1.2680 0.04729 153 123 19 11
1647 Well, that sounded a wrong note! 1.2680 0.04448 153 120 25 8
1648 Wasn't a typo. Truly is a dramatic Liszting. 1.2680 0.04448 153 120 25 8
1649 It’s a rare Andrew Frank Lloyd Webber Wright house. 1.2680 0.04250 153 118 29 6
1650 I know you can play Chopsticks, Dave. Now is not the time. 1.2680 0.04448 153 120 25 8
1651 Aaaand here's our 2020 grand finale. 1.2680 0.04250 153 118 29 6
1652 A good arguement to let angels only play the harp. 1.2680 0.04148 153 117 31 5
1653 It’s early Frank Gehry. 1.2680 0.04637 153 122 21 10
1654 So this is 2020’s version of a performance “bringing the house down”. 1.2680 0.04043 153 116 33 4
1655 Well, they said free delivery 1.2680 0.04250 153 118 29 6
1656 This seems right on key for 2020. 1.2667 0.04602 150 119 22 9
1657 Anyway you slice it, that's one gigantic piano. 1.2667 0.04792 150 121 18 11
1658 I keep expecting a gigantic Liberace to follow. 1.2667 0.04504 150 118 24 8
1659 That is a crashendo 1.2667 0.04602 150 119 22 9
1660 Well, the finale certainly brought down the house. 1.2667 0.04602 150 119 22 9
1661 If it's a Steinway we may come out ahead. 1.2667 0.04403 150 117 26 7
1662 I told you to get a smaller piano or have a bigger house. 1.2667 0.03684 150 118 27 5
1663 He did it. He brought down the house. 1.2667 0.04300 150 117 25 7
1664 Well, that gives new meaning to "swan song'. 1.2667 0.04300 150 118 25 7
1665 Maybe delivery by drone wasn't the best choice. 1.2667 0.04504 150 118 24 8
1666 What a grand finale this is Ollie! 1.2667 0.04403 150 117 26 7
1667 On a lighter note... 1.2667 0.04403 150 117 26 7
1668 We should have made him take up the harmonica. 1.2667 0.04300 150 116 28 6
1669 Oh, this is just cartoonish 1.2667 0.04300 150 116 28 6
1670 Tropical Storm Bosendorfer, you say? 1.2667 0.04300 150 116 28 6
1671 Definitely not Liberace. Looks more like a Billy Joel piece. 1.2667 0.04195 150 115 30 5
1672 My luck...I just signed up for violin lessons. 1.2667 0.03684 150 118 27 5
1673 What time is the bench being delivered? 1.2667 0.04195 150 115 30 5
1674 He did mention that the spare keys were on the front porch. 1.2667 0.04403 150 117 26 7
1675 They should have stayed with the virtual concert." 1.2667 0.04602 150 119 22 9
1676 Music was a big part of their life. 1.2667 0.04792 150 121 18 11
1677 What a great performance – he brought the house down! 1.2667 0.04195 150 115 30 5
1678 Unduly noted 1.2667 0.04403 150 117 26 7
1679 Live next to Elton John they said. It will be fun they said. 1.2667 0.04403 150 117 26 7
1680 I thought Jerry Lee Lewis had retired. 1.2667 0.04602 150 119 22 9
1681 Is this climate change? 1.2667 0.04300 150 116 28 6
1682 Somebody’s not making it to Carnegie Hall. 1.2667 0.04195 150 115 30 5
1683 Don't mess with the harpist's union. 1.2667 0.04504 150 118 24 8
1684 That's not exactly what I meant by "Ending on a good note." 1.2667 0.04602 150 119 22 9
1685 It was free 2-day shipping! 1.2667 0.04504 150 118 24 8
1686 I thought they only used harps up there! 1.2667 0.04504 150 118 24 8
1687 ``I'm sorry. Without drums and a bass, it's a tear down.'' 1.2667 0.04698 150 120 20 10
1688 These go to 11. 1.2667 0.04698 150 120 20 10
1689 Huh, you're right, it doesn't fit in the living room. 1.2667 0.04300 150 116 28 6
1690 Not bad for 2020. 1.2667 0.04403 150 117 26 7
1691 There's always a risk with flying arpeggios. 1.2656 0.05020 128 102 18 8
1692 I told you the last movement always brings down the house. 1.2653 0.04561 147 116 23 8
1693 You should not have made him practice 1.2653 0.04133 147 112 31 4
1694 Maybe you were right. The second floor piano lounge wasn't s a great idea. 1.2653 0.04244 147 113 29 5
1695 I liked it better when it was raining men. 1.2653 0.04458 147 115 25 7
1696 I think it’s time to begin the beguine. 1.2653 0.04561 147 116 23 8
1697 Is that the new set of keys you ordered? 1.2653 0.04189 147 115 26 6
1698 I told you I heard something last night. 1.2653 0.04352 147 114 27 6
1699 The critics will probably say it was a smashing debut. 1.2653 0.04858 147 119 17 11
1700 On the bright side, we have been paying for falling-piano insurance for years. 1.2653 0.04662 147 117 21 9
1701 Let's not ask if his recital went well. 1.2653 0.04458 147 115 25 7
1702 The insurance company says it’s only minor damage. 1.2653 0.04662 147 117 21 9
1703 Not so grand now! 1.2653 0.05046 147 121 13 13
1704 It looked smaller when I ordered it. 1.2653 0.04352 147 114 27 6
1705 The good news is we insured our piano. 1.2653 0.04244 147 113 29 5
1706 It’s my new piece ‘Concerto in A Major Insurance Claim’. 1.2653 0.04761 147 118 19 10
1707 Well, I always wanted someone to say my music brought down the house. 1.2653 0.04076 147 114 28 5
1708 At this scale, you’re going to see major destruction. 1.2653 0.04458 147 115 25 7
1709 It's not so grand anymore! 1.2653 0.04458 147 115 25 7
1710 Funny, we didn't see that coming. 1.2653 0.04561 147 116 23 8
1711 Do you still think climate change is a hoax? 1.2653 0.04858 147 119 17 11
1712 Usually, I hate to miss the grand finale. 1.2653 0.04244 147 113 29 5
1713 Let’s face it, darling. This isn’t our forte. 1.2653 0.04561 147 116 23 8
1714 So that's what the sound of silence looks like 1.2653 0.04662 147 117 21 9
1715 Need to study from home? Subscribe to our online music lessons and we'll throw in a piano. Absolutely free. 1.2653 0.04352 147 116 24 7
1716 Happy six month quarantine-versary, honey. 1.2653 0.04561 147 116 23 8
1717 Climate change. Huh. 1.2649 0.04327 151 120 23 8
1718 This is the work of Satan. God would have delivered a fully functional piano. 1.2649 0.04009 151 117 29 5
1719 Let's use these movers" you said. "What could go wrong? 1.2645 0.04660 121 93 24 4
1720 At least I found my keys. 1.2635 0.04732 148 119 19 10
1721 Streaming music from the Cloud seems to have some downsides. 1.2635 0.04534 148 117 23 8
1722 Does our policy cover an act of Bach? 1.2635 0.04534 148 122 17 9
1723 Normally I'd say that this only happens in movies, but it's just not the year. 1.2635 0.04326 148 115 27 6
1724 Looks like it's going to be "The Unfinished Symphony" for a long time. 1.2635 0.04634 148 118 21 9
1725 Whoops, delivery problem! Billy Joel is at 335 Elm Street. 1.2635 0.04431 148 116 25 7
1726 Well, in the grand scheme of things... 1.2635 0.04534 148 117 23 8
1727 It’s jazz piano, it’s supposed to sound like that. 1.2635 0.04052 148 115 28 5
1728 Huh. I was expecting an asteroid. 1.2621 0.04379 145 113 26 6
1729 I shouldn't have written that bad review of the concert. 1.2621 0.04487 145 114 24 7
1730 We have insurance for this right? 1.2621 0.03793 145 113 28 4
1731 You think they'd mind if I played Chopsticks? 1.2621 0.04593 145 115 22 8
1732 Our feud with the Steinways has gotten out of hand. 1.2621 0.04487 145 114 24 7
1733 At this point, I was almost expecting it. 1.2621 0.04487 145 114 24 7
1734 Do you think we still need to tip the movers? 1.2621 0.04487 145 114 24 7
1735 Our kid is playing piccolo. 1.2621 0.04379 145 113 26 6
1736 ...the Coda and Finale of his Election Sonata in B Flat Major. 1.2621 0.04324 145 115 23 7
1737 Wow, they really brought the house down. 1.2621 0.04696 145 116 20 9
1738 I never really understood John Cage. 1.2621 0.04696 145 116 20 9
1739 I guess Amazon Prime still has some work to do. 1.2621 0.04593 145 115 22 8
1740 Must be nice when you can afford to drop a grand on your roofing. 1.2621 0.04696 145 116 20 9
1741 You promised me I would ‘love’ the John Cage meets Frank Gehry remodel 1.2621 0.04487 145 114 24 7
1742 2020 final chord 1.2621 0.04379 145 113 26 6
1743 Oops, too big. 1.2621 0.04487 145 114 24 7
1744 John always said is was either his way or the Steinway. 1.2606 0.04654 142 113 21 8
1745 What do you want to do for lunch? 1.2606 0.04545 142 113 20 8
1746 So this must be Wile E Coyote’s house. 1.2606 0.04545 142 112 23 7
1747 The ending really brought down the house. 1.2606 0.04320 142 110 27 5
1748 Better check the exclusions in our policy. 1.2606 0.04320 142 110 27 5
1749 My first grand slam! 1.2606 0.04965 142 116 15 11
1750 I heard the pianist could bring down the house. 1.2603 0.04460 146 115 24 7
1751 I think it's got to be intentional. See that chair? There's no way it would have like..."bounced" up and landed in the window that way. I think it's some sort of art piece. 1.2603 0.04667 146 117 20 9
1752 I never knew “acts of God” came with an accompaniment. 1.2603 0.04243 146 113 28 5
1753 They said it would just B Minor renovations, but I C Major changes to the architectural design. 1.2603 0.04460 146 115 24 7
1754 We needed a bigger home anyway. 1.2603 0.05056 146 121 12 13
1755 It rained Bachs and Mozarts Last night. 1.2603 0.04667 146 117 20 9
1756 Insurer said they won’t cover it. Apparently it’s considered an ‘Act of Bach’. 1.2603 0.04565 146 116 22 8
1757 And you thought living beside Billy Joel would bring our property value up... 1.2603 0.04667 146 117 20 9
1758 Glad you made me go for a walk. 1.2589 0.04871 112 87 21 4
1759 Given our kid was inside, we now have A-flat minor. 1.2587 0.04517 143 113 23 7
1760 That must have been quite a concert. 1.2587 0.04517 143 113 23 7
1761 From Liza’s cabaret show. Why? 1.2587 0.04625 143 114 21 8
1762 This is my latest project: it's John Cage meets Frank Gehry meets Wile E. Coyote. 1.2587 0.04730 143 115 19 9
1763 No Taylor, I’m not at all surprised. After learning that Kanye bought the old Liberace plane, we should have expected it. 1.2587 0.04177 143 110 29 4
1764 This isn’t what I meant when I asked the realtor to drop off an extra set of keys. 1.2587 0.04057 143 109 31 3
1765 Asteroids are so cultured these days 1.2587 0.04350 143 114 22 7
1766 I could have sworn it would fit. My bad. 1.2587 0.04625 143 114 21 8
1767 And the FEMA maps said we weren't in a piano-prone area! 1.2587 0.04406 143 112 25 6
1768 COVID19, racial profiling, climate change, .....Why not a giant Baby Grand piano? 1.2587 0.04406 143 112 25 6
1769 I just said, "I forgot my keys." 1.2587 0.04293 143 111 27 5
1770 I think that it’s going to need tuning. 1.2587 0.04625 143 114 21 8
1771 Definitely F Major. 1.2587 0.04625 143 114 21 8
1772 Where does the time go? It started as a baby grand. 1.2587 0.04517 143 113 23 7
1773 I guess they be having a Funeral in B-Minor. 1.2587 0.04833 143 116 17 10
1774 Hell of a crescendo.... 1.2587 0.04625 143 114 21 8
1775 This reminds me of an old Yiddish curse my grandfather used to use. 1.2587 0.03807 143 107 35 1
1776 We will retune. 1.2587 0.04406 143 112 25 6
1777 Holy Stravinsky!!! 1.2587 0.04934 143 117 15 11
1778 Oh look, our own personal House of Blues... 1.2587 0.04625 143 114 21 8
1779 Please look up and tell me the concert hall is not coming next. 1.2587 0.04517 143 113 23 7
1780 This week on Househunters: she wants a 2 bedroom cottage, he wants a giant piano. Can their real estate agent find a house they can compromise on? 1.2587 0.04406 143 112 25 6
1781 There's nothing like a vintage Steinway to bring down the house. 1.2587 0.04625 143 114 21 8
1782 So it wasn't Clapton, but Elton John, who was God 1.2587 0.04406 143 112 25 6
1783 We should probably scale it down. 1.2587 0.04293 143 111 27 5
1784 I see Amazon is testing its drone delivery service again. 1.2587 0.04406 143 112 25 6
1785 Huh, I always thought they played harps. 1.2587 0.04934 143 117 15 11
1786 I guess we didn't have to be so worried about leaving the stove on 1.2587 0.04406 143 112 25 6
1787 I've heard of bringing the house down, but this is ridiculous 1.2587 0.04177 143 110 29 4
1788 Too bad the insurance only covers upright pianos 1.2587 0.04517 143 113 23 7
1789 I said, "A little more to MY right." 1.2587 0.04177 143 115 23 5
1790 When I was six, I ended my lessons by throwing my chair across the room 1.2587 0.04118 143 112 26 5
1791 Well, Carol, you always dreamed of owning a Steinway. 1.2587 0.04625 143 114 21 8
1792 ‘This’ll show that Old Lady who lives in the shoe.’ 1.2587 0.04406 143 112 25 6
1793 It’s a slippery slope once you take away single-family zoning 1.2587 0.04833 143 116 17 10
1794 Steinway residence? 1.2587 0.04625 143 114 21 8
1795 I'd say that last piece really brought the house down. 1.2585 0.04433 147 116 24 7
1796 Now THAT 'S a Grand finale. 1.2571 0.04795 140 113 18 9
1797 His playing brought down the house. 1.2571 0.04345 140 109 26 5
1798 That's gonna be a bitch to tune... 1.2571 0.04345 140 109 26 5
1799 Life could not get any grander. 1.2571 0.04576 140 111 22 7
1800 That's the most poorly tempered clavier I have ever seen. 1.2571 0.05005 140 115 14 11
1801 I should have insured it for a grand. 1.2571 0.04687 140 112 20 8
1802 I kinda thought delivering pianos by drone was oversold. 1.2571 0.04102 140 107 30 3
1803 Is this similar to mic drop? 1.2571 0.04462 140 110 24 6
1804 Now THAT 's fortissimo! 1.2571 0.04462 140 110 24 6
1805 This is what happens when they name a hurricane "Steinway" 1.2571 0.04462 140 110 24 6
1806 Remember when you said falling-piano-trope insurance premiums were through the roof? 1.2571 0.04795 140 113 18 9
1807 The avant-garde sculpture earned praise for its commentary on post-suburban trends in childhood music education. 1.2571 0.04576 140 111 22 7
1808 I wish they'd stop naming hurricanes after composers. 1.2571 0.04462 140 110 24 6
1809 In hindsight, that ukelele was a good idea. 1.2571 0.04687 140 112 20 8
1810 I don't like how the Steinways crash our parties. 1.2571 0.04345 140 109 26 5
1811 Who knew Amazon would deliver it by drone? 1.2571 0.04345 140 109 26 5
1812 I call it the Derecho Sonata. 1.2571 0.04687 140 112 20 8
1813 At least the roadrunner got out okay. 1.2571 0.04225 140 108 28 4
1814 Hold on, maybe it's not so bad from the back 1.2571 0.04225 140 108 28 4
1815 I just asked Siri to play The Piano Man." 1.2569 0.04596 144 115 21 8
1816 She said cats and dogs. 1.2569 0.04267 144 112 27 5
1817 That concerto really brought down the house! 1.2569 0.04489 144 114 23 7
1818 Don't you say "Ain't life grand!" Harold... 1.2569 0.04152 144 111 29 4
1819 If you're thinking what I'm thinking, this is gonna be followed by a really big shoe. 1.2569 0.04489 144 114 23 7
1820 Well, you wanted a Steinway. 1.2569 0.04379 144 113 25 6
1821 At least now we're not obligated to see the show. 1.2569 0.04267 144 112 27 5
1822 I think we arrived too late to make a grand entrance. 1.2569 0.04379 144 113 25 6
1823 Well, the tritone cuts the house in half, but the dissonance highlights the tension between the elements. 1.2569 0.04267 144 112 27 5
1824 It's just a little flat. 1.2553 0.04318 141 110 26 5
1825 It's a 2020 thing. 1.2553 0.04764 141 114 18 9
1826 They said they tried the new Amazon drone service. 1.2553 0.04434 141 111 24 6
1827 Maybe the Post Office does need better funding. 1.2553 0.04199 141 109 28 4
1828 So is it Art or an Accident??? 1.2550 0.04380 149 118 24 7
1829 Drone delivery was half price 1.2547 0.04845 106 82 21 3
1830 The cat is dead. 1.2538 0.04544 130 102 23 5
1831 Sometimes you just need a little push to move on 1.2538 0.04544 130 102 23 5
1832 Victor Borge went too far this time 1.2538 0.04544 130 102 23 5
1833 - Someone will have to pay. - Well, duh. 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1834 What's the harm in getting a pet coyote?" Now we know 1.2536 0.04939 138 113 15 10
1835 You never said there would be consequences if we didn’t support the arts 1.2536 0.04122 138 108 26 4
1836 I hope the guy who lost this thing doesn't come by. 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1837 There goes our deposit" 1.2536 0.04831 138 112 17 9
1838 I TOLD you not to order an Acme piano. 1.2536 0.04939 138 113 15 10
1839 Go figure. Major damage in a minor key. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1840 I guess the angels choir will be singing a capella today. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1841 And we thought the 88 Steinway Close address was a GOOD omen. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1842 Where's the bench? 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1843 She did say she would bring the house down! 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1844 We have to face the music and rebuild . 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1845 Yes, but I distinctly remember telling you that this performance would ‘bring down the house.’ 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1846 Dammit! Our deductible is a Grand. 1.2536 0.04831 138 112 17 9
1847 This is a big fucking sign...time to move to Canada. 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1848 I heard his concert finale brought down the house 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1849 2020—Yeesh! 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1850 How big was the stork delivering this baby grand? 1.2536 0.04248 138 107 27 4
1851 Wow! That's what I call a grand finale! 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1852 ...and I just got it tuned. 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1853 Should have gone with the baby grand. 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1854 Let's face it. It was either that or an anvil. 1.2536 0.04831 138 112 17 9
1855 It turns out you were right to question the drone delivery option. 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1856 I never thought l'd see a Grand slam 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1857 One does not very often see grand pianos in this neighbourhood. 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1858 When I told that decorator "We're thinking to drop a grand on it," I assumed he knew I was talking about a budget. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1859 I’m afraid the adjuster may not see this as black and white. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1860 That's the last time I write a bad review on one of his Chopin recitals. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1861 They always said his playing would bring the house down someday 1.2536 0.04491 138 112 19 7
1862 Wow, piano sales have really dropped! 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1863 Rachmaninoff always brings the house down! 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1864 In retrospect, I should've ordered the anvil. 1.2536 0.04122 138 111 21 6
1865 I thought you meant something else when you said it would bring the house down. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1866 I hear God got tired of hearing Liberaci play. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1867 OK, but “house with grand piano” isn’t quite what I was expecting... 1.2536 0.02920 138 113 21 4
1868 We should probably move back before the bass drops. 1.2536 0.04248 138 107 27 4
1869 Keys to the house? Let's search the piano and call it a day. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1870 I always thought the phrase was "manna from heaven". 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1871 I guess God’s moved on from harps. 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1872 Still 2020. Shoulda seen that coming. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1873 What do you expect when you register for one of those online piano crash courses? 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1874 I guess Great Gramma Jean wasn’t fooling when she said they would drop off her Steinway Grand once she reached the Promised Land. 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1875 While I'm confident our insurance covers acts of God, I'm unsure about acts of Liberace. 1.2536 0.04122 138 106 29 3
1876 Told you I'd get it in. 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1877 That’s one forte piano! 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1878 Looks like Beethoven brought down the house. 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1879 I heard that he told her 'It's either my way, or the Steinway.' 1.2536 0.04831 138 112 17 9
1880 I didn't know it was going to be this grand. 1.2536 0.05149 138 115 11 12
1881 I dont know whether I should feel sorry for the piano or the house 1.2536 0.04248 138 107 27 4
1882 Tip jar, or a GoFundMe page? 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1883 I guess God discovered the guitar. 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1884 I told you that it wouldn't fit. 1.2536 0.04186 138 109 24 5
1885 They say the tornado passed through Julliard. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1886 I've a right to think pianos can fly. 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1887 The anvil arrives next week. 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1888 Hopefully we're covered for lounge acts of God. 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1889 I see what you mean... the performance DID bring down the house!" 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1890 When I requested "Stormy Weather," this isn't exactly what I had in mind! 1.2536 0.03992 138 108 27 3
1891 When you said "crashendo" I thought I'd misheard you. 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1892 Well, if that’s not the “2020 Year in Review”, I don’t know what is.... 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1893 I thought Steinway stopped making the mega-grand. 1.2536 0.04248 138 107 27 4
1894 Well, YOU shouldn't have mocked hurricane Wolfgang! 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1895 Must be out of thunderbolts. 1.2536 0.04939 138 113 15 10
1896 Dear - is it the one you ordered? 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1897 It gets worse. My agent tells me it's a act of God. 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1898 Well, that was hardly pianissimo. 1.2536 0.04248 138 107 27 4
1899 People should really read the disclaimer before selecting same day delivery. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1900 I guess you could call it Rhapsody From the Blue. 1.2536 0.04122 138 106 29 3
1901 I really can't wait for 2020 to be hindsight. 1.2536 0.04122 138 106 29 3
1902 I think we should sue MIT. 1.2536 0.05251 138 116 9 13
1903 I believe that chord surpassed Sgt. Peppers by 8 seconds. 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1904 So, a fiddler on the roof just wasn't classy enough for you, was it? 1.2536 0.04248 138 107 27 4
1905 Based on our policy, I sure hope a piano was part of God's act 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1906 Perhaps a tad too grand? 1.2536 0.04186 138 109 24 5
1907 Are you sure you prayed for 'pennies' from Heaven? 1.2536 0.04248 138 107 27 4
1908 It’s just like in 1958 when Van Cliburn brought the house down! 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1909 This is why you always check the dimensions before ordering online 1.2536 0.04248 138 109 24 5
1910 "That's our last drone delivery! 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1911 That's the only drawback of Free Delivery. 1.2536 0.04491 138 109 23 6
1912 I was afraid that door would probably have to come off. 1.2536 0.04831 138 112 17 9
1913 Another tragic victim of Tropical Storm Liberace. 1.2536 0.04248 138 107 27 4
1914 This was not quite the housing crash I anticipated 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1915 It’s almost January right? 1.2536 0.04371 138 108 25 5
1916 Well, the universe really wants me to take those lessons 1.2536 0.04248 138 107 27 4
1917 They were kind enough to throw in a grand piano for free 1.2536 0.04607 138 110 21 7
1918 I told you a violin would be better. 1.2536 0.04720 138 111 19 8
1919 I told you there wasn’t room for a piano in the study 1.2536 0.03343 138 108 28 2
1920 I SUPPOSE NOW THE FIRST THING THE TUNER WILL ASK IS; "HAS THIS PIANO BEEN MOVED?" 1.2519 0.04299 135 105 26 4
1921 Maybe we should have measured first. 1.2518 0.04577 139 111 21 7
1922 I told you not to tease that coyote! 1.2518 0.04690 139 112 19 8
1923 At least Amazon got it here on time 1.2518 0.04690 139 112 19 8
1924 Well, they said they'd drop the keys off. 1.2518 0.04096 139 107 29 3
1925 I told you it would never hold a tune! 1.2518 0.04690 139 112 19 8
1926 You were right - we shouldn't have used a moving company with the motto "we'll make it fit" . 1.2518 0.04462 139 110 23 6
1927 The lady said she was buying a stairway to heaven, not a steinway. 1.2518 0.04577 139 111 21 7
1928 I don't think the new Boeing piano bar is a good idea. 1.2518 0.04343 139 109 25 5
1929 Accidentals happen. 1.2518 0.04690 139 112 19 8
1930 I turned the house upside down looking for my keys. 1.2518 0.04577 139 111 21 7
1931 Why is downsizing so difficult? 1.2518 0.03695 139 109 29 1
1932 The mls listing did say it has a grand entrance. 1.2518 0.04096 139 107 29 3
1933 That was the music critic's house 1.2518 0.04462 139 110 23 6
1934 Now that’s what you call a grand entrance! 1.2518 0.04577 139 111 21 7
1935 And that's how they made the last chord of "A Day in the Life". 1.2518 0.04343 139 109 25 5
1936 Eighty-eight keys and it still couldn't get in any other way. 1.2518 0.04462 139 110 23 6
1937 I'm just impressed Pachelbel's cannon has that kind of firepower. 1.2518 0.04690 139 112 19 8
1938 Wow! Now that's what I'd call a grand disaster! 1.2518 0.04462 139 110 23 6
1939 They asked to give them a 5-star rating for on-time delivery. 1.2518 0.04577 139 111 21 7
1940 I think we only have percussion insurance. 1.2518 0.04343 139 109 25 5
1941 They were finally tired of Liberace up here. 1.2518 0.04462 139 110 23 6
1942 Don’t forget to submit this to Home and Garden... 1.2518 0.04222 139 108 27 4
1943 No Karen, I don’t think we can conclude that this is caused by China without some hard evidence 1.2518 0.04096 139 112 21 6
1944 Yes, but the location is key. 1.2518 0.04577 139 111 21 7
1945 A few bugs to iron out before drone delivery really catches on. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
1946 Forecast says we’re due some church organs Tuesday.” 1.2500 0.04272 136 106 26 4
1947 Not your usual act of God. 1.2500 0.04142 136 105 28 3
1948 I thought this only happened in cartoons. 1.2500 0.04519 136 108 22 6
1949 Another unfinished symphony, I guess 1.2500 0.03870 136 110 22 4
1950 The movers said they're not responsible. 1.2500 0.04769 140 114 17 9
1951 Apparently he said, “Hulk not like piano lessons.” 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
1952 So this is Amazon Instant delivery. 1.2500 0.04272 136 108 23 5
1953 Well, it IS 2020. . . 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
1954 Next time pray for a spare key, singular. 1.2500 0.04433 140 111 23 6
1955 A-flat house! 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
1956 I have to admit I did not believe the weather forecast. 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
1957 I still think Falling Piano Insurance is a scam. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
1958 I think Amazon's drone delivery needs some fine tuning. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
1959 I thought we were hoping for a grandbaby, not a baby grand." 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
1960 Now that we have faced the music, let's dance. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
1961 See? That's why you need a conductor. 1.2500 0.04519 136 108 22 6
1962 Remember that special insurance rider you asked me to cancel last month? 1.2500 0.04660 140 113 19 8
1963 Why would you buy a inflatable piano? 1.2500 0.04519 136 108 22 6
1964 Are you sure we aren't part of something much bigger than us? 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
1965 I wasn’t expecting the day the music died 1.2500 0.03727 136 106 28 2
1966 What the fuck? 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
1967 Sometimes "free home delivery" isn't a good choice. 1.2500 0.04272 136 106 26 4
1968 Well, he did say his performance was going to bring down the house. 1.2500 0.04519 136 108 22 6
1969 The angels' concert brought down the house. 1.2500 0.04459 136 110 19 7
1970 A Major disaster. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
1971 When they said the concert would bring down the house, I had no idea this is what they meant. 1.2500 0.04754 136 110 18 8
1972 You always said you wanted the house to look sharp. 1.2500 0.04519 136 108 22 6
1973 Well,we got it in. 1.2500 0.04142 136 105 28 3
1974 I told you you couldn't just "eyeball" it, John. 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
1975 I mean, we've always talked about pitching that idea for "This Old House: The Musical" 1.2500 0.04272 136 106 26 4
1976 It’s the best thing that’s happened to us this year 1.2500 0.04272 136 106 26 4
1977 We’re going to need a Major Lift. 1.2500 0.04519 136 108 22 6
1978 Do you think the guy at Farmers Insurance has see this one? 1.2500 0.04754 136 110 18 8
1979 The add said, “grand piano on the house” but this is ridiculous. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
1980 What do you get when you combine a hurricane with an outdoor pandemic concert? 1.2500 0.04868 136 111 16 9
1981 I don’t think any of these keys are going to work. 1.2500 0.04978 136 112 14 10
1982 Guess we should have selected no-contact delivery. 1.2500 0.04754 136 110 18 8
1983 Well, that’s a grand slam if ever I saw one. 1.2500 0.04519 136 108 22 6
1984 Looks like Junior cracked my Amazon password. 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
1985 Evidently Donald Trump was stealing the White House piano on Air Force One to pawn it. 1.2500 0.04316 140 110 25 5
1986 First sharknados now this. 1.2500 0.04142 136 105 28 3
1987 Pretty clear that there are alternative universes--or this is just an art installation. 1.2500 0.04660 140 113 19 8
1988 That sure is a big baby! 1.2500 0.04272 136 106 26 4
1989 It looked smaller in the picture. 1.2500 0.04008 136 104 30 2
1990 I always wanted a piano, but never expected such a grand windfall. 1.2500 0.04754 136 110 18 8
1991 Maybe Amazon wasn’t best for that item. 1.2500 0.05086 136 113 12 11
1992 Well, on the bright side, this will keep our minds off of current events for a while. 1.2500 0.04754 136 110 18 8
1993 I told you we didn't tip the movers enough. 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
1994 Wow, a Grand Slam! 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
1995 Well, we can throw away the keys. 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
1996 They kept saying that Glen Gould was a giant, but who knew. 1.2500 0.04519 136 108 22 6
1997 It was a baby grand when they got it. 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
1998 Amazon still hasn’t perfected its drone delivery system. 1.2500 0.04142 136 105 28 3
1999 Huh. So that's what the middle pedal does. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
2000 I told you we'd be glad we got falling-piano-out-of-a-blue-sky insurance. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
2001 I told you not to mess with The Liberace Family! 1.2500 0.04008 136 109 23 4
2002 Any sign of the ruby slippers? 1.2500 0.04316 140 110 25 5
2003 I have a sinking feeling our policy specifically excludes piano accidents. 1.2500 0.04008 136 104 30 2
2004 Remember when you said that if we didn't have music we'd have nothing? 1.2500 0.04272 136 106 26 4
2005 I'll bet it was the Julliard crew. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
2006 Fuck. Our home is ruined. 1.2500 0.02712 136 116 14 6
2007 I miss conventional warfare. 1.2500 0.04519 136 108 22 6
2008 This will set drone delivery back years. 1.2500 0.04142 136 105 28 3
2009 I'd like to see the enormous pianist. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
2010 Dear, I think this is a new stage 1.2500 0.04754 136 110 18 8
2011 Geez, what a heavy piece of music... 1.2500 0.04979 140 116 13 11
2012 Oh, 2020, did you have to end on a sour note? 1.2500 0.04868 136 111 16 9
2013 If 2020 was a piano 1.2500 0.04519 136 108 22 6
2014 Why don’t you ever listen to me? 1.2500 0.04397 136 107 24 5
2015 Well... Lets go get some breakfast. 1.2500 0.04142 136 105 28 3
2016 Saw that one coming... 1.2500 0.04868 136 111 16 9
2017 Free shipping with amazon prime. 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
2018 Oh look honey, we can live through music now. 1.2500 0.04272 136 111 18 7
2019 The key to life is not to sweat the small stuff 1.2500 0.04316 140 110 25 5
2020 I guess God is having his own issues with 2020" 1.2500 0.04754 136 110 18 8
2021 That ended on a wrong note 1.2500 0.04316 140 110 25 5
2022 Boy, when Billy Joel drops in, he really drops in! 1.2482 0.04369 137 108 24 5
2023 To think the Weather Channel had predicted a baby grand. 1.2482 0.03915 137 112 19 6
2024 Gee. Flat. Major! 1.2482 0.04369 137 108 24 5
2025 Wasn't that a colossal cadenza? 1.2482 0.04723 137 111 18 8
2026 That wasn't what I had in mind when I said grand entrance! 1.2482 0.04490 137 109 22 6
2027 Now I know how the economy feels. 1.2482 0.04608 137 110 20 7
2028 I think we should’ve gone with a baby grand. 1.2482 0.04369 137 108 24 5
2029 Piano is not my forte. 1.2482 0.04723 137 111 18 8
2030 I never knew he played! 1.2482 0.04490 137 109 22 6
2031 I told them it had to go upstairs 1.2482 0.04608 137 110 20 7
2032 I told you we shouldn't have invited that fat lady to sing. 1.2482 0.04608 137 110 20 7
2033 Guess he forgot his key. 1.2482 0.04490 137 109 22 6
2034 I see they dropped another grand on the house to no avail. 1.2482 0.04608 137 110 20 7
2035 Now that's piano forte! 1.2482 0.04369 137 108 24 5
2036 That sure must have been some kitten on the keys! 1.2482 0.04835 137 112 16 9
2037 Oh no I left my facemask inside! 1.2482 0.04723 137 111 18 8
2038 Now that is what I call crescendo. 1.2482 0.04244 137 107 26 4
2039 I thought they said they'd drop the keys off AT the house. 1.2482 0.04369 137 108 24 5
2040 Were they calling for a pianonado? 1.2482 0.04244 137 107 26 4
2041 Amazon still has a few kinks to work out with drone delivery. 1.2482 0.04723 137 111 18 8
2042 The insurance company says it is an act of God, so we're not covered. 1.2482 0.04430 137 111 19 7
2043 Well, it's definitely gone flat. 1.2482 0.04608 137 110 20 7
2044 Barb, I warned you about next day drone delivery. 1.2482 0.04369 137 108 24 5
2045 Too big, I think. 1.2482 0.04244 137 107 26 4
2046 Do you remember what you said when I pushed for piano coverage on our insurance? 1.2482 0.04835 137 112 16 9
2047 Well, I prayed a grand would fall magically from the sky. 1.2481 0.04453 133 105 23 5
2048 What pains you the most, the damage or the cliché? 1.2481 0.04323 133 104 25 4
2049 I think we should have hired movers. 1.2481 0.04323 133 104 25 4
2050 I had a feeling it wasn't going to fit. 1.2481 0.04702 133 107 19 7
2051 Yes but, unlike a tornado, at least with a derecho you know where the piano came from. 1.2481 0.04579 133 106 21 6
2052 Let me get this straight: You had to say the chances were the same as a piano falling from the sky ... and onto my house? You couldn’t have said the chances were the same as winning the lottery? And why involve my house in this!?! 1.2481 0.04702 133 107 19 7
2053 I think we found your keys. 1.2481 0.04189 133 103 27 3
2054 I thought we ordered the baby grand. 1.2463 0.04295 134 105 25 4
2055 I'm guessing insurance fraud. 1.2462 0.04377 130 102 24 4
2056 Well this really puts the A minor in apocalypse 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
2057 So much for living in harmony 1.2458 0.04953 118 95 17 6
2058 Does this piano make my house look flat? 1.2458 0.04805 118 94 19 5
2059 All anyone knows is, it was delivered by a skinny guy and a fat guy wearing derbies. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2060 I thought I heard a foreboding crescendo in the distance 1.2443 0.04735 131 106 18 7
2061 His performance of the Piano Concerto in E brought down the house. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2062 Well, that's a grand entrance! 1.2443 0.04858 131 107 16 8
2063 That was one hell of a high note! 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2064 I told you his last performance would bring down the house. 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2065 The brochure did say it was a "Grand Manor House" 1.2443 0.04210 131 105 22 4
2066 That piano really brought the house down. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2067 Remnants from tropical storm Rachmaninoff. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2068 I guess the movers didn't appreciate the bounced check. 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2069 It was bigger than a Category 5 storm; they call it a "Liberace." 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2070 I guess it tried to come back for its baby grand. 1.2443 0.04210 131 102 26 3
2071 I knew this would happen." 1.2443 0.04735 131 106 18 7
2072 He did say he’d throw in the Grand Piano on top. 1.2443 0.04735 131 106 18 7
2073 This sure puts a damper on things. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2074 I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2075 Amazon clearly needs to do more work on their drone delivery." Mitch Zeller 1.2443 0.04858 131 107 16 8
2076 And after all the other expenses, it will probably need retuning. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2077 So middle C is the one where the front window used to be? 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2078 now THAT'S a coda 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2079 Don’t worry, honey, I know a piano repairman. 1.2443 0.04858 131 107 16 8
2080 Well, that's the end of that tune. 1.2443 0.04210 131 102 26 3
2081 Well, I sure didn't see thst one coming! 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2082 I said Pianissimo -- not piano-missle-go. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2083 Well, 2020 continues to surpass itself. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2084 Ok. Sure it “brought down the house”. But everything gets a standing ovation these days. 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2085 You’re right. I do prefer the open concept. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2086 So much for my rooftop concert tonight. 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2087 I thought they said baby grand. 1.2443 0.04735 131 106 18 7
2088 It looked smaller in the showroom. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2089 It's one of the downsides of a tiny house. 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2090 Wow, that was close...it almost hit my garage. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2091 I would say this problem is A Major one. 1.2443 0.04279 131 105 21 5
2092 Somebody must have hit the wrong chord. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2093 Surely revenge for skipping all my boyhood piano lessons 1.2443 0.04858 131 107 16 8
2094 It's not surprising at all - you couldn't expect a piano that size to stay up in the air forever 1.2443 0.03845 131 102 27 2
2095 And the bench is being delivered separately tomorrow. 1.2443 0.04735 131 106 18 7
2096 I suppose I should have paid the surcharge for white glove delivery. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2097 Living next to Wile E. Coyote has been interesting. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2098 We're going to need a good tuner. 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2099 I don't know if she was a good witch or a bad one, but at karaoke night she always destroyed "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road." 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2100 Well it definitely gives the house a whole new feel. 1.2443 0.04210 131 102 26 3
2101 When you said the roof repair would be a grand, I thought you meant something else . 1.2443 0.04858 131 107 16 8
2102 Well, I did'nt see that coming. 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2103 Actually, I was expecting the Spanish Inquisition. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2104 They say she always brings the house down. 1.2443 0.04735 131 106 18 7
2105 Yes, but on the plus side it comes with lots of keys. 1.2443 0.04414 131 106 19 6
2106 I fear discord in the galaxy. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2107 So, Lena Horn stopped by. 1.2443 0.04347 131 105 21 5
2108 Now I know why they call it "Hurricane Horowitz" - Paul Jelinek, NYC 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2109 Well, he said we could get it for a song. 1.2443 0.04735 131 106 18 7
2110 I told you this renovation was hitting all the wrong notes. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2111 I guess you can't jettison musical arts from schools without there being some retaliation. 1.2443 0.04414 131 106 19 6
2112 Wonder where the giant Liberace landed? 1.2443 0.03921 131 100 30 1
2113 So I was right. The piano doesn't fit through the skylight. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2114 I'm guessing fortissimo. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2115 I'm guessing dinner's off. 1.2443 0.04210 131 102 26 3
2116 No strings attached. 1.2443 0.04858 131 107 16 8
2117 That last note fell flat 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2118 Well I don’t know about you but I’m ecstatic they delivered it in under two hours. 1.2443 0.04347 131 103 24 4
2119 This new John Cage music is getting out of hand. 1.2443 0.04858 131 107 16 8
2120 Total loss? Nah, just a grand. 1.2443 0.04735 131 106 18 7
2121 I have always found Wagner a bit heavy. 1.2443 0.04735 131 106 18 7
2122 This is A minor incident as far as 2020 is concerned 1.2443 0.04210 131 102 26 3
2123 I warned Ted that a crash course was no way to learn the piano. 1.2443 0.04609 131 105 20 6
2124 I really like John Cage’s new piece. 1.2443 0.04480 131 104 22 5
2125 Damn I knew we should have gotten the piano insurance! 1.2424 0.04450 132 105 22 5
2126 Remember when we brought it home? It was just a little harmonica, then an accordion, then a harpsichord, and now this. 1.2424 0.04251 132 106 21 5
2127 Grand performance brings house down. 1.2424 0.04318 132 104 24 4
2128 I thought we paid for the white glove delivery? 1.2424 0.04703 132 107 18 7
2129 The adjuster said if that isn’t an Act of God, he doesn’t know what is. 1.2424 0.04450 132 105 22 5
2130 So that's what "House Piano Insurance" is for. 1.2424 0.04824 132 108 16 8
2131 Music festivals have changed a lot huh 1.2424 0.04943 132 109 14 9
2132 Well, it's not exactly the housing crash I was expecting... 1.2424 0.03896 132 104 26 2
2133 I'm guessing its a Steinway Super Grand. 1.2424 0.05058 132 110 12 10
2134 I asked the Lord what would happen if a piano fell on our house. And He replied: “You’ll B Flat!” 1.2424 0.04182 132 103 26 3
2135 It looked much better in the Guggenheim. 1.2424 0.04824 132 108 16 8
2136 They knew the risks of moving to Toontown” 1.2424 0.04943 132 109 14 9
2137 Using a delivery drone was definitely not the best choice 1.2424 0.04450 132 105 22 5
2138 Ordering a baby grand piano on line for drone delivery has a few kinks to iron out. 1.2424 0.04318 132 104 24 4
2139 The bench took out the neighbor's Lexus. 1.2424 0.04578 132 106 20 6
2140 So, I guess we can forget the rooftop concert. 1.2424 0.04182 132 103 26 3
2141 Hurricane Steinway certainly lived up to its name. 1.2424 0.04041 132 102 28 2
2142 This is why I've always preferred the harmonica. 1.2424 0.04450 132 105 22 5
2143 Beethoven just had to get the final word on 2020... 1.2424 0.04318 132 104 24 4
2144 2020. Typical! 1.2424 0.04578 132 106 20 6
2145 I guess this happens in real life as well as in the movies 1.2424 0.04515 132 108 17 7
2146 So noted. 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2147 Looks like our neighbor upstairs is making a bit more room in the cloud. 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2148 That's the last time I'll select "drone delivery" 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2149 So I said,"drop off the keys when you go by my house." 1.2422 0.04539 128 102 21 5
2150 Well we'll have to move but at least we won't have to move the piano 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2151 I told you I dropped my keys. 1.2422 0.04802 128 104 17 7
2152 And I always thought the song refrain was pennies from heaven. 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2153 That's real piano forte! 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2154 Yes, Athena, 2020 is the year of unexpected fallout. 1.2422 0.04471 128 104 18 6
2155 The one day we leave home and we miss the most exciting thing to happen since March? 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2156 The insurance guy told me it's not a black or white claim. 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2157 Never drop ship a grand piano 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2158 You were right; that was one hell of a crescendo. 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2159 These movers get no tip. 1.2422 0.04259 128 100 25 3
2160 OMG irshwin 1.2422 0.04259 128 100 25 3
2161 It could have been worse. It could have been a pipe organ." 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2162 Looks like the Hulk is having trouble with his music lessons again. 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2163 Next time we should pay extra for the white glove delivery. 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2164 His solo always brought down the house! 1.2422 0.04539 128 102 21 5
2165 That damned Wile E. Coyote missed him again !!! 1.2422 0.04259 128 100 25 3
2166 It was scheduled to play next door. 1.2422 0.05052 128 106 13 9
2167 Actually, I think it was 'Fiddler' on the roof... 1.2422 0.04539 128 102 21 5
2168 Well, we did save 49% on our insurance by not covering "Other." 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2169 Uh, Amazon, we have a problem. 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2170 Oh, so easy to fall for classical music. 1.2422 0.04187 128 102 22 4
2171 Trump gets reelected AND a piano materializes out of thin air? What are the chances? 1.2422 0.04802 128 104 17 7
2172 You were right... The baby grand was a better option. 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2173 Remind me, when is the delivery window for the bench? 1.2422 0.04401 128 103 20 5
2174 And here we spent all that time waiting for the other shoe to drop..... 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2175 Amazon still has some work to do on their Drone Delivery 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2176 Be careful what you wish for. 1.2422 0.04471 128 104 18 6
2177 No, doesn’t strike a chord. 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2178 It's gotta be Photoshopped. 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2179 I went with the bigger model, for the free shipping. 1.2422 0.04802 128 104 17 7
2180 Needless to say, I didn't tip the movers. 1.2422 0.04802 128 104 17 7
2181 You were right, dear, the house was too small. 1.2422 0.04539 128 102 21 5
2182 Yep, the bigger they are, the harder they fall. 1.2422 0.04539 128 102 21 5
2183 Tell Amazon that one size does not fit all. 1.2422 0.04929 128 105 15 8
2184 Well,it's not what we planned,but I think we'll still be a roadside attraction. 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2185 It was a mezzocyclone, but there's never been one this grand. 1.2422 0.04802 128 104 17 7
2186 I assume this is the "forte." When does the "piano" get here 1.2422 0.04802 128 104 17 7
2187 A fiddler on the roof would have been smarter. 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2188 I guess drone delivery still has some kinks to work out. 1.2422 0.04331 128 103 20 5
2189 Such a keytastrophe 1.2422 0.03636 128 103 23 2
2190 I guess you didn't measure. 1.2422 0.04539 128 102 21 5
2191 She definitely brought the house down with that performance” 1.2422 0.04539 128 102 21 5
2192 Told you it wouldn’t fit though the door. 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2193 This isn't quite what I meant when I asked for a grand finale. 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2194 Large object drone delivery still has a ways to go. 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2195 Well there go my delusions of grandeur 1.2422 0.04929 128 105 15 8
2196 I ordered the Baby Grand? 1.2422 0.04539 128 102 21 5
2197 I wonder how we can blame this on Trump? 1.2422 0.04802 128 104 17 7
2198 « Well isn’t that grand. » 1.2422 0.04401 128 101 23 4
2199 Well, it does have a yard. 1.2422 0.04673 128 103 19 6
2200 Should we go and welcome the new neighbors? 1.2422 0.04259 128 102 22 4
2201 I’d say this is exactly like the dream I had but you’re not a talking fish. 1.2419 0.04490 124 98 22 4
2202 Well, Chopsticks! 1.2404 0.05020 104 83 17 4
2203 This happens sometimes when the angels move on from harps. 1.2403 0.04769 129 105 17 7
2204 I wish I'd clicked the box for insurance. 1.2403 0.04508 129 103 21 5
2205 Now they're playing harps. 1.2403 0.03777 129 107 18 4
2206 Well this explains why we heard fee, fie, fo, fum after that horrible rendition of Chopsticks. 1.2403 0.04508 129 103 21 5
2207 I guess the airlines new in flight entertainment wasn't a hit. 1.2403 0.04769 129 105 17 7
2208 Guess the Beetles were prophetic......this is clearly "the day the music died." 1.2403 0.04640 129 104 19 6
2209 Yesterday that was campus ROTC housing. Now all you'll find inside is A flat major 1.2403 0.04769 129 107 14 8
2210 It's the 2020 version of the 1812 Overture. 1.2403 0.04640 129 104 19 6
2211 Frankly, I don't see this as being so grand. 1.2403 0.05136 129 108 11 10
2212 Not a good idea to run this cartoon while a Category 4 hurricane ravages Louisiana." 1.2403 0.04640 129 109 12 8
2213 I guess drone delivery isn't really Amazon's forte. 1.2403 0.04508 129 103 21 5
2214 I'm going to write a scathing Amazon Review for this one." 1.2403 0.04230 129 101 25 3
2215 I must admit this tear down really strikes a chord with me. 1.2403 0.04085 129 100 27 2
2216 You didn’t happen to find a jar full of my evening’s tips? 1.2403 0.04769 129 105 17 7
2217 This is not what I meant by bringing down the house tonight. 1.2403 0.04230 129 101 25 3
2218 The Almighty's done playin'. 1.2403 0.04640 129 104 19 6
2219 should we just blame this on 2020 too? 1.2403 0.04640 129 104 19 6
2220 Acme Prime Delivery... should’ve seen this coming... 1.2403 0.04371 129 102 23 4
2221 It’s minor 1.2385 0.04341 130 103 23 4
2222 I told you the piccolo was a warning. 1.2381 0.04704 126 102 18 6
2223 Now that's what you call a Grand Slam. 1.2381 0.04567 126 101 20 5
2224 Now THAT'S what I call a crescendo. 1.2381 0.04567 126 101 20 5
2225 It looked smaller in the sky 1.2381 0.04426 126 100 22 4
2226 Well, that performance sure brought the house down. 1.2381 0.04567 126 101 20 5
2227 That is one grand mess! 1.2381 0.04426 126 100 22 4
2228 I thought that fortissimo was a bit much... 1.2381 0.04280 126 99 24 3
2229 Next time we hire professional piano movers 1.2381 0.04567 126 101 20 5
2230 I just remembered where I left my keys 1.2381 0.04497 126 103 17 6
2231 Yep - that's a B flat. 1.2381 0.04837 126 103 16 7
2232 How could it get worse? This is how it could get worse. 1.2381 0.04129 126 98 26 2
2233 Ain't that just grand. 1.2381 0.04426 126 100 22 4
2234 That piano concerto really brought down the house! 1.2381 0.03973 126 102 20 4
2235 I wished for a 20 foot penis. 1.2381 0.04426 126 105 14 7
2236 Call the tuner, it’s a little flat. 1.2381 0.04129 126 98 26 2
2237 This was the Grand Finale'. 1.2381 0.04567 126 101 20 5
2238 I did what you said — "Drop a grand on the roof." 1.2381 0.04567 126 101 20 5
2239 The grand real estate crash of 2020 has began. 1.2381 0.04704 126 102 18 6
2240 What did you expect? It's still 2020." 1.2381 0.04837 126 103 16 7
2241 That’s not the sound of music... 1.2381 0.04967 126 104 14 8
2242 That's the last time I'll download music from that app. 1.2381 0.04280 126 99 24 3
2243 It’s a musical neighborhood 1.2381 0.04967 126 104 14 8
2244 Well honey, when you ask for a grand in 2020, this is what you get 1.2381 0.04426 126 100 22 4
2245 The HOA says it’s fine so long as It’s not a percussion. 1.2381 0.04567 126 101 20 5
2246 Oh thank God -- for a second there I though it was a harpsichord. 1.2381 0.04704 126 102 18 6
2247 sounds like “Piano Movement in B flat”. 1.2381 0.04704 126 102 18 6
2248 it is hard to keep a roof over your head when you are a struggling musician 1.2381 0.04567 126 101 20 5
2249 Don’t worry, I still have my a Capella career to fall back on. 1.2381 0.04426 126 100 22 4
2250 So, NOW can we agree that when they said our neighbor is a ‘Wiley Coyote’, it wasn’t a figure of speech? 1.2381 0.04280 126 99 24 3
2251 Thanks Amazon! 1.2373 0.04611 118 94 20 4
2252 Well the realtor did say we could get it for a song... 1.2373 0.04611 118 94 20 4
2253 I dunno. 'Be careful what you wish for' maybe? 1.2373 0.04766 118 95 18 5
2254 I see now why it's listed for one grand. 1.2366 0.04312 131 104 23 4
2255 This is not what I thought they meant by, "dropping off the keys." 1.2362 0.04535 127 102 20 5
2256 At least their love story ended on a high note. 1.2362 0.04535 127 102 20 5
2257 Maybe drone deliveries should experiment with smaller items first! 1.2362 0.04251 127 100 24 3
2258 I think an upright might have been a better choice. 1.2362 0.04395 127 103 19 5
2259 The insurance company said it was an act of God. 1.2362 0.04671 127 103 18 6
2260 He is inside looking for the lost chord. 1.2362 0.04803 127 104 16 7
2261 I doubt that this will be covered; the "Acts of God" clause only covers damage due to falling harps. 1.2362 0.04535 127 102 20 5
2262 Maybe we should have bought a bigger house. Cathy Mahon Northport, NY 1.2362 0.04535 127 102 20 5
2263 That's not very grand. 1.2362 0.04395 127 101 22 4
2264 So, you think we should cancel our Amazon prime drone delivery? 1.2362 0.04671 127 103 18 6
2265 Can't say I didn't warn you about drone deliveries. 1.2362 0.04395 127 101 22 4
2266 Where's that guy who's seen a thing or two? 1.2362 0.04671 127 103 18 6
2267 It looks like the movers were right. The front door was too small. 1.2362 0.04324 127 103 19 5
2268 Must be a demo model. 1.2362 0.04535 127 102 20 5
2269 Well I'll Be A Sonata Of A Bitch! 1.2362 0.04671 127 103 18 6
2270 Do you think the owners will come and get it if we offer a reward? 1.2362 0.04101 127 101 23 3
2271 It just sounds flat to me. 1.2362 0.04931 127 105 14 8
2272 I prefer manna. 1.2362 0.04803 127 104 16 7
2273 I don't think a Grand is going to cover it 1.2362 0.04931 127 105 14 8
2274 That's how it is now. The delivery service just drops it at the front door, rings the bell and takes off. 1.2362 0.04251 127 100 24 3
2275 Maybe if we try sideways 1.2362 0.04803 127 104 16 7
2276 He challenged the devil to play Rachmaninoff's third symphony and won. 1.2358 0.04332 123 97 23 3
2277 It looks like their drone delivery system needs some work. 1.2358 0.04630 123 99 19 5
2278 I'll give you 88 reasons why we should move." 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2279 Act of God or God acting out? 1.2358 0.04909 123 101 15 7
2280 I told him not to try to put it in the attic. 1.2358 0.04771 123 100 17 6
2281 That's what happens when you piss off Jerry Lee Lewis. 1.2358 0.04630 123 99 19 5
2282 Well now I'm definitely not wearing a mask! 1.2358 0.04630 123 99 19 5
2283 Well, I'm from Texas and I've seen 'em bigger than that. 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2284 I told you there were risks living next to a giant bean stalk.. 1.2358 0.05043 123 102 13 8
2285 I always thought it was just good etiquette to send notes. 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2286 At this point in 2020, I'm kind of surprised it wasn't the moon. 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2287 At least it wasn't racial violins. 1.2358 0.04630 123 99 19 5
2288 music from heaven 1.2358 0.04630 123 99 19 5
2289 Beats me... first a coyote races into the house, then this weird bird says "Beep, Beep", and then this ACME piano drops out of the sky and flattened everything. 1.2358 0.04483 123 100 18 5
2290 the Drone got the wrong address 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2291 What’s black and white and if it fell out of a tree it’d kill you? 1.2358 0.04332 123 97 23 3
2292 I told you to take up the harmonica 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2293 A little to the left? 1.2358 0.04630 123 99 19 5
2294 You just had to get super grand, didn't you? 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2295 It seemed smaller in the photos. 1.2358 0.05173 123 98 19 6
2296 Ya, definitely the wrong scale. 1.2358 0.04771 123 100 17 6
2297 I’d definitely call that destruction on a grand scale ! 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2298 so thaaaaat's what that sound was. 1.2358 0.04630 123 99 19 5
2299 Perhaps shipping by drone wasn 1.2358 0.04909 123 101 15 7
2300 It's the latest Phillip Glass arrangement." "Yes, Very 2020. 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2301 See, I told you the Amazon drones could deliver anything in 30 minutes or less. 1.2358 0.03666 123 98 23 2
2302 You know, I have often heard about the expression heavy metal, but never heavy piano 1.2358 0.04483 123 100 18 5
2303 Your grandmother would be so proud that we kept this. 1.2358 0.04630 123 99 19 5
2304 Why am I not surprised? #2020 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2305 I’m all for supporting the arts, but this initiative is getting a bit aggressive. 1.2358 0.04630 123 99 19 5
2306 Well, SOMEONE must’ve found out Cuomo said no ticketed music events. 1.2358 0.04771 123 100 17 6
2307 Maybe we should try the back door. 1.2358 0.04630 123 99 19 5
2308 You said you wanted to keep it low key but... 1.2353 0.04878 119 97 16 6
2309 I guess we struck the wrong chord 1.2353 0.04254 119 95 21 3
2310 I find classical music too heavy. 1.2344 0.04638 128 104 18 6
2311 Did you measure it? 1.2344 0.04638 128 104 18 6
2312 Is that a Steinway? 1.2344 0.04896 128 106 14 8
2313 I told you it wouldn't fit through the front door! 1.2339 0.04301 124 98 23 3
2314 I told you he hates piano lessons! 1.2339 0.04596 124 100 19 5
2315 Thank goodness it didn't hit the wifi. 1.2339 0.04301 124 98 23 3
2316 The piano was sitting in the lot when the house erupted right out of the ground and lifted it straight up into the air. 1.2339 0.04524 124 102 16 6
2317 It looked a lot smaller in the showroom. 1.2339 0.04301 124 98 23 3
2318 Every pianist dreams of bringing down the house." 1.2339 0.04596 124 100 19 5
2319 I think we can save the piano. 1.2339 0.04451 124 99 21 4
2320 But did it sound like a freight train? 1.2339 0.04451 124 99 21 4
2321 I thought the airlines did away with piano lounges on jumbo jets. 1.2339 0.04451 124 99 21 4
2322 I told him to get falling big piano insurance. 1.2339 0.04596 124 100 19 5
2323 I guess buying the Fazioli on Amazon for the free shipping wasn't a great idea. 1.2339 0.04737 124 101 17 6
2324 They're calling it an 'act of God.' 1.2339 0.04066 124 99 22 3
2325 You never should have agreed to give piano lessons to that Bunyan kid. 1.2339 0.04301 124 98 23 3
2326 Just when you think things can’t get any weirder. 1.2339 0.04451 124 99 21 4
2327 A smashing performance, it brought the house down! 1.2339 0.04596 124 100 19 5
2328 Do you think this is the sign we were looking for? 1.2339 0.04737 124 101 17 6
2329 I guess I clicked on delivery by drone. 1.2339 0.04301 124 98 23 3
2330 Drone delivery needs a little more work. 1.2339 0.04451 124 99 21 4
2331 Time to go house Chopin 1.2339 0.04451 124 99 21 4
2332 Wish they would’ve gone with the baby grand 1.2339 0.05006 124 103 13 8
2333 It did not spark joy. 1.2339 0.04451 124 99 21 4
2334 Looks like you were right. We should have paid the extra sixty bucks for their White Glove delivery service." 1.2320 0.04419 125 100 21 4
2335 This was an orchestrated hit. 1.2320 0.04271 125 99 23 3
2336 You're right. It's too big for the house. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2337 Apparently Stairway to Heaven has an alternative ending 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2338 Acme Piano Crash Course is gonna get a piece of my mind! 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2339 Not just an urban myth then 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2340 That last number really brought down the house. 1.2314 0.04805 121 99 16 6
2341 Don't build a symphony center where tornadoes are common,I said. Did they listen? 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2342 White glove delivery isn't what it used to be. 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2343 Your policy also does not cover flooding. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2344 I don't usually like this avant-garde stuff, but that was pretty spectacular. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2345 There has to be an easier way of getting that final chord 1.2314 0.04805 121 99 16 6
2346 I guess someone heard "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" one too many times. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2347 Well, on that note... 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2348 He didn't play his Hammerklavier Sonata enough when he was alive?!? 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2349 If they’d stick with harps up there, this wouldn’t have happened. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2350 I've heard of bringing down the house, but that's ridiculous. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2351 Oh no, not another performance artist! 1.2314 0.04192 121 95 24 2
2352 Could we just remind the insurance company that Margaret Truman's piano leg once fell through the floor of the White House? 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2353 Grand . . . but not great! 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2354 You said you wanted to pick up a new instrument? No better time than now! 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2355 So...still think we can redecorate under a grand? 1.2314 0.04946 121 100 14 7
2356 Honey, please tell me you didn't forget to send in our annual pledge to the symphony. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2357 Never get between a baby grand and its mother. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2358 Well that's odd.. I thought they only played the harps. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2359 That piano is definitely going to need to be tuned. 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2360 It looked much smaller in the catalogue. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2361 Don't worry. They always bring them in through the roof. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2362 A little off-key? 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2363 I asked for a tuba. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2364 I told Jack it was too big for the bean stalk, but he never listens. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2365 Not so grand anymore, is it? 1.2314 0.04354 121 98 19 4
2366 That really was the “Surprise Symphony”! 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2367 They always bragged about being seventh generation Salieri... 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2368 I really just wanted a keyboard. 1.2314 0.04805 121 99 16 6
2369 But now all I need is for aliens invade, and I'll have a "bingo"! 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2370 I didn’t want to say anything, but it may be too big for the living room. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2371 I suppose, now, that we'll have to get it tuned. 1.2314 0.04805 121 99 16 6
2372 Did we remember to tip the movers? 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2373 They said to be alert for falling debris in our Aria 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2374 Well at least now we don’t have to worry about losing our keys. 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2375 Okay ... now the woodwinds. 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2376 Just before the piano hit the house, I swear I saw a roadrunner dash in the front door... 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2377 Did Dorothy play the piano? 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2378 The Bösendorfer Meteor wasn't supposed to be here until sometime in 2022. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2379 Yes, dear, that is definitely a grand piano. 1.2314 0.04025 121 94 26 1
2380 Scales of destruction? More major than minor. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2381 We're going to need bigger sheet music. 1.2314 0.04805 121 99 16 6
2382 Was this what you expected, when they invited us to their drop-in concert 1.2314 0.04192 121 95 24 2
2383 Played that B Flat a little too hard in retrospect 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2384 And we thought it was the house of blues during quarantine... 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2385 That rendition always brings down the house. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2386 I told you it sounded flat... 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2387 Jack says the giant’s having trouble with arpeggios. 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2388 They tried to hoist it, but got the pitch wrong. 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2389 Hurricane Amadeus. 1.2314 0.04025 121 94 26 1
2390 His performance always brings the house down! 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2391 I thought they played harps. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2392 That was some finale! 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2393 I fail to see what's so "grand" about it. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2394 And we thought it would be COVID.... 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2395 In retrospect, perhaps my review of his performance of Beethoven's Piano Concerto No. 1 was a tad too critical. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2396 The wicked piano of the west? 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2397 I guess the muses love you or hate you! 1.2314 0.03667 121 100 18 2
2398 Now that’s what I call fortissimo. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2399 Next time I'll leave a key for the movers 1.2314 0.04432 121 99 17 5
2400 There's no mincing words here. We're facing a large scale disaster. 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2401 Well, that performance really brought the house down. 1.2314 0.03938 121 96 23 2
2402 That's a lot of ivory! 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2403 It looked a lot smaller in the store. 1.2314 0.04025 121 94 26 1
2404 No need for Ibiza. We got all the house music you want. 1.2314 0.02692 121 100 19 2
2405 I heard his performance brought the house down... 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2406 Jesus! Now that's fortissimo! 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2407 I guess this isn’t a good time to put the house on the market 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2408 When I prayed for help to find my lost keys, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2409 The President says that Joe Biden did this! I already knew it. 1.2314 0.05083 121 101 12 8
2410 That's NOT white glove delivery ! 1.2314 0.04805 121 99 16 6
2411 When Jim and Karen discussed getting a new set of keys for their house, this was hardly what they had in mind. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2412 We're going to be in treble. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2413 Ain’t life grand. 1.2314 0.04805 121 99 16 6
2414 It didn’t look that big on the website. 1.2314 0.04805 121 99 16 6
2415 I asked for pianissimo and they sent pianoforte. 1.2314 0.05217 121 102 10 9
2416 Sorry, I was too excited finding this piano for free on Craigslist. 1.2314 0.04192 121 95 24 2
2417 It was just a matter of time before the deconstructivist movements of architecture and music would merge to bring us something so new and wonderful. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2418 Trust me: I'm in insurance and I know an Act of God when I see one. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2419 They said they weren't going to drop it off 'til this afternoon. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2420 Elon Musk put it in orbit, then got tired of it. 1.2314 0.04805 121 99 16 6
2421 This reminds me of a painting by Salvador Dali. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2422 If it were just a tree I think we'd be covered. 1.2314 0.04025 121 99 19 3
2423 Okay, so now we know the limitations of drone delivery. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2424 It's not a break-in, Helen. Technically, they used keys. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2425 I’m Sue... the Steinways asked me to check their mail” 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2426 Well honey, I guess this is our ode to 2020 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2427 Maybe we should have gone around the back 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2428 I told you having it delivered by drone was a bad idea. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2429 Listen darling, we finally have a fancy doorbell at least ! 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2430 We just had it tuned, you know. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2431 Found my house keys 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2432 That's 2020 for you 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2433 It was a huge hit. 1.2314 0.04946 121 100 14 7
2434 Coronavirus, racial inequities, Trump, wildfires and now falling pianos- California can't catch a break 1.2314 0.04192 121 95 24 2
2435 Well that performance really did bring down the house. 1.2314 0.04805 121 99 16 6
2436 Well if this would have happened last year, I would have been shocked 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2437 Hurricane Beethoven was certainly worse than we thought it would be. 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2438 I said Tall - not Grande! 1.2314 0.04025 121 98 20 3
2439 I’m pretty sure he said the keys were under the mat.. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2440 I wish Dorothy would stick to the hot air balloon. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2441 Well, that’s a piano forte! 1.2314 0.03938 121 96 23 2
2442 Pian-oh-no! 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2443 Nope, not on my 2020 bingo card. 1.2314 0.04509 121 97 20 4
2444 I’m sorry, but this modern art exhibit is falling flat with me 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2445 I always wanted a house in the Keys! 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2446 I told you we could get this house for a song. 1.2314 0.04354 121 96 22 3
2447 I think your piano teacher has finally had it with Zoom. 1.2314 0.04659 121 98 18 5
2448 I expected a wind instrument, not a grand piano! 1.2295 0.04769 122 100 16 6
2449 I knew God was angry with us, but the piano? 1.2295 0.04162 122 96 24 2
2450 What a grand catastrophe. 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2451 I’m not in the mood for a melody, nor am I feeling alright. 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2452 That piano has always had delusions of grandeur. 1.2295 0.03996 122 95 26 1
2453 Picking delivery by drone was not such a good idea. 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2454 This turned out to be a grand disaster. 1.2295 0.04909 122 101 14 7
2455 You're right. Drone delivery was not the best option. 1.2295 0.04162 122 96 24 2
2456 It was the last movement that did it ! 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2457 There's nothing grand about this, Moira. 1.2295 0.04909 122 101 14 7
2458 Personally, I never cared for the way they conducted themselves. 1.2295 0.04769 122 100 16 6
2459 At least we’ll never lose the keys again 1.2295 0.04476 122 98 20 4
2460 This will be instrumental in changing zoning laws. 1.2295 0.04769 122 100 16 6
2461 Well, ain’t that a piano fortissima!! 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2462 Now we just need to find where the bench went. 1.2295 0.04476 122 98 20 4
2463 « Aren’t you glad now that we were more than 6 feet apart from the neighbors?!! » 1.2295 0.04909 122 101 14 7
2464 Yep, that seems about right this year. 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2465 I guess Trump didn't like the song they were playing in his plane. 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2466 I’ve heard of a high note breaking a glass, but this is ridiculous. 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2467 I think it needs more than tuning now, dear. 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2468 A minor catastrophe...get it hun? 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2469 We're really in treble now. 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2470 It looked a lot smaller on the website. 1.2295 0.04476 122 98 20 4
2471 The ad did say "Yours for a song." 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2472 It couldn't have been an upright?! 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2473 I told you we should have gone with standard ground delivery, but no, you were in such a hurry to practice.... 1.2295 0.04769 122 100 16 6
2474 I knew one of those keys would open the door. 1.2295 0.03547 122 100 19 3
2475 Well great, now they're both flat." 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2476 So let me get this straight... every time it rains, it rains this?? 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2477 Well, it certainly was a secure house. It took 88 keys to get in. 1.2295 0.04322 122 99 19 4
2478 Remember when we thought it was cute that we lived on Stein Way? 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2479 Are we covered for toon incidents? 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2480 The owner is some guy named Wile E. Coyote 1.2295 0.04476 122 98 20 4
2481 Looks like Dorothy decided no more piano lessons 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2482 Well, that's one grand mess! 1.2295 0.04769 122 100 16 6
2483 A master piano player will bring down the house every time. 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2484 This is a fixer upper honey, but the piano comes with the house. 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2485 Does our insurance cover Acts of Liberace? 1.2295 0.04476 122 98 20 4
2486 So many hurricanes this year they made it to Wolfgang. 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2487 Hmm, the hazard of "Bringing the House Down" during COVID 19. 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2488 He’s had a grand ole time destroying the American Dream, now onward to to November! 1.2295 0.04476 122 98 20 4
2489 So now where are we going to put the asteroid? 1.2295 0.04322 122 97 22 3
2490 And to think I used to love B-flat 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2491 I told you playing that Devil's music on the piano would have consequences. 1.2295 0.04476 122 98 20 4
2492 Huh. This wasn’t on my 2020 bingo card. 1.2295 0.04476 122 98 20 4
2493 I just don’t know why Elon thought slingshotting a piano into space would work. 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2494 It seems that your drop shipping business is working. 1.2295 0.04625 122 99 18 5
2495 When I asked for the keys to the house I wasn’t expecting this... 1.2290 0.04542 131 107 18 6
2496 That moment when God realized he'd never play the Rach III as well as Van Cliburn. 1.2288 0.04876 118 97 15 6
2497 Technically, it's a seven octave drop. 1.2288 0.04240 118 93 23 2
2498 As God is my witness, I thought they could fly. 1.2276 0.04872 123 102 14 7
2499 This is what happens when you get more than you bargained for. 1.2276 0.04734 123 101 16 6
2500 Honey, I found the keys! 1.2276 0.04291 123 98 22 3
2501 Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Carnegie Hall anymore 1.2276 0.04291 123 98 22 3
2502 I know Steinways can break the bank, but I figured our house was safe. 1.2276 0.04591 123 100 18 5
2503 What the hell is that house doing under my piano!? 1.2276 0.04734 123 101 16 6
2504 Is that really the next level after fortississimo? 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2505 This is gonna go much easier if the insurance adjuster is musical. 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2506 Let's be more careful with what we order through Amazon drone delivery. 1.2269 0.04375 119 95 21 3
2507 I can’t take another unprecedented thing. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2508 Do you know a piano tuner? 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2509 It’s too big for the venue 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2510 I am sure there is a simple explanation" 1.2269 0.04375 119 95 21 3
2511 I never did like John Cage! 1.2269 0.05124 119 100 11 8
2512 Huh. I thought it was just those itty bitty harps up there... 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2513 I think Amazon Prime needs better packaging for oversize items! 1.2269 0.04839 119 98 15 6
2514 I never heard it coming. 1.2269 0.04375 119 95 21 3
2515 Now that is what I would call a crash-endo. 1.2269 0.04839 119 98 15 6
2516 It's a note from my ex. 1.2269 0.04375 119 95 21 3
2517 You were right. Bringing it in through an upstairs window wasn’t such a great idea. 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2518 Maybe getting it by mail was a mistake. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2519 I TOLD you we should get a BABY grand... 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2520 The review said his Mozart was a little heavy-handed. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2521 Damn you Amazon drone delivery! 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2522 Cloudy with a chance of Beethoven 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2523 I've heard that piece always brings down the house 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2524 Well, we DID insist on free two-hour delivery. 1.2269 0.04209 119 96 20 3
2525 It looks like 1.2269 0.04984 119 99 13 7
2526 I guess we shouldn’t have chopped down that beanstalk. 1.2269 0.04036 119 97 19 3
2527 How likely is it for a Steinway to hit? 1.2269 0.04209 119 99 15 5
2528 Not even God can move a piano 1.2269 0.04209 119 94 23 2
2529 This brings new meaning to "Bringing the House Down". 1.2269 0.04839 119 98 15 6
2530 Isn't is usually a safe? 1.2269 0.04535 119 98 16 5
2531 I told you not to take lessons from the Sopranos. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2532 I knew we should've hired movers. 1.2269 0.04209 119 94 23 2
2533 Inopportune, no? 1.2269 0.04839 119 98 15 6
2534 Well dear, I think the new addition is simply smashing. 1.2269 0.04839 119 98 15 6
2535 Someone brought down the house. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2536 And I thought it was a typo when the score said 'crashendo' 1.2269 0.04375 119 95 21 3
2537 I’ll never trust a drone delivery again. 1.2269 0.04375 119 95 21 3
2538 Wait, I thought I ordered a baby grande. 1.2269 0.04839 119 98 15 6
2539 Look on the bright side - no, seriously look away toward the bright side, just to the left. 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2540 Hmmm... the bigger they are, the harder they really do fall. 1.2269 0.04375 119 95 21 3
2541 I told you we should have made the giant take out personal liability insurance when we rented him the beanstalk. 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2542 If God wanted us to have a piano wouldn't he have brought it through the front door? 1.2269 0.04375 119 95 21 3
2543 Maybe next time don't pick B flat. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2544 Looks like the culture wars are starting to heat up. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2545 We could have used a professional piano mover. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2546 I hear the delivery man once had a paper route. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2547 They said it could bring the house down. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2548 Maybe we shouldn't have opted for drone delivery? 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2549 It was a piece by John Cage. 1.2269 0.04839 119 98 15 6
2550 Maybe delivery by drone wasn’t such a great idea. 1.2269 0.04209 119 94 23 2
2551 Told you it'd fit. 1.2269 0.04689 119 97 17 5
2552 And that wasn’t even the worst part of 2020. 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2553 Honestly not the craziest thing I’ve seen this year... 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2554 Whoopsies 1.2269 0.04535 119 96 19 4
2555 Well, at least we aren’t stuck at home anymore 1.2269 0.04036 119 93 25 1
2556 When they said they'd drop off the keys... 1.2261 0.04793 115 94 16 5
2557 Is that a real Bösendorfer..? 1.2258 0.04970 124 104 12 8
2558 There was a spider... 1.2250 0.04342 120 96 21 3
2559 It wasn’t going to fit anyway. 1.2250 0.04501 120 97 19 4
2560 You said you brought the house down, but really! 1.2250 0.04342 120 96 21 3
2561 Her last performance brought down the house. 1.2250 0.04802 120 99 15 6
2562 I knew it wasn’t going to fit. 1.2250 0.04654 120 98 17 5
2563 i told you these house concerts could be a problem 1.2250 0.04802 120 99 15 6
2564 The house is available for a song and a dance. 1.2250 0.04342 120 96 21 3
2565 No, I asked for a fiddler! 1.2250 0.04802 120 99 15 6
2566 How long do you think before someone notices it missing? 1.2250 0.04654 120 98 17 5
2567 Well, the movers did say they'd be dropping off the piano today. 1.2250 0.04802 120 99 15 6
2568 This is why drone delivery is still in beta. 1.2250 0.04342 120 96 21 3
2569 You bought a grand piano on Ebay without asking just how grand it was? 1.2250 0.04501 120 97 19 4
2570 I'm not feeling good about drone delivery." I said. "C'mon, get with the times." you said 1.2250 0.04654 120 98 17 5
2571 You know what? I'm starting to think it's just too grand. 1.2250 0.04007 120 94 25 1
2572 Next time, we hire a piano mover. 1.2250 0.04342 120 96 21 3
2573 Broadway needs to reopen for these amateurs to stop bringing down actual houses 1.2250 0.04342 120 96 21 3
2574 Oops, my bad. 1.2250 0.04802 120 99 15 6
2575 ‘damn, I loved that piano.’ 1.2250 0.04501 120 97 19 4
2576 They say it'll take a few grand more if we want it to be flat. 1.2241 0.04077 116 91 24 1
2577 With a little TLC, you could flip the house and the piano. 1.2241 0.04429 116 93 20 3
2578 Hurricane Steinway hit them hard. 1.2241 0.04429 116 93 20 3
2579 It was a smash hit! 1.2241 0.04911 116 96 14 6
2580 You always wanted a grand finale 1.2241 0.04257 116 92 22 2
2581 I think Amazon's new drone delivery needs some modifications 1.2241 0.04257 116 92 22 2
2582 I’m sure the bass and drums aren’t too far behind” 1.2241 0.04596 116 94 18 4
2583 I don’t think it’s going to fit. 1.2241 0.04596 116 94 18 4
2584 We should of expected this when the tornado siren was a screeching Beethoven’s Ninth instead of the usual blast. 1.2241 0.04429 116 93 20 3
2585 Well Cheryl, I guess your mother was right about this place after all. 1.2241 0.04756 116 95 16 5
2586 I said "in the living room," not "on the living room." 1.2241 0.04911 116 96 14 6
2587 So this is what happens for the worst cartoon caption entry. 1.2241 0.05061 116 97 12 7
2588 Well, I guess that does beat the finish to "Sgt Pepper's." 1.2241 0.04596 116 94 18 4
2589 NOW can we sell the upright? 1.2241 0.04429 116 93 20 3
2590 Huh. The forecast called for falling anvils. 1.2241 0.04429 116 93 20 3
2591 I heard the most beautiful, resonant D minor chord and rushed right over. 1.2241 0.04911 116 96 14 6
2592 I see Elton’s Rocket Man finale blew everyone away. 1.2241 0.04756 116 95 16 5
2593 I was hoping Lucy would have dropped her diamonds instead... 1.2241 0.04429 116 93 20 3
2594 Drone delivery still needs a few tweaks. 1.2241 0.04596 116 94 18 4
2595 Is it too late to exchange it for an upright? 1.2241 0.04429 116 93 20 3
2596 I thought it was being delivered tomorrow. 1.2241 0.04429 116 93 20 3
2597 So this is where the New Yorker Daily Humor piano landed. 1.2241 0.04911 116 96 14 6
2598 I agree there's a certain symmetry, but Gehry always finds a way to hit a sour note. 1.2241 0.04756 116 95 16 5
2599 Not what I thought it was meant by: Play through. 1.2241 0.04257 116 97 14 5
2600 That's the last time I hire Steinway and Sons Demolition Company. 1.2241 0.04911 116 96 14 6
2601 I told you it's my way or the Steinway. 1.2241 0.04429 116 93 20 3
2602 Well look on the bright side, this isn't the worst thing to happen in 2020. 1.2241 0.04756 116 95 16 5
2603 I still think an upright would work better 1.2241 0.04077 116 91 24 1
2604 Something fell a bit off-key. 1.2241 0.04344 116 95 17 4
2605 It doesn’t play in Peoria 1.2231 0.04230 121 99 18 4
2606 It was supposed to be a piano cresendo not crashendo! 1.2231 0.04147 121 96 23 2
2607 Well, so much for drone delivery. 1.2231 0.04467 121 98 19 4
2608 This one's in B Flat. 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2609 I told you we shouldn't rent to a roadrunner 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2610 Amazon's drone delivery sure is fast. 1.2222 0.04396 117 94 20 3
2611 Don't worry - it's up to coda 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2612 You misheard me. I didn't say I wanted a giant pianist. 1.2222 0.05021 117 98 12 7
2613 I bet you they'll deny the claim as act of God. 1.2222 0.04396 117 94 20 3
2614 Goldberg, Schmoldberg--now that's a variation. 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2615 Huh. Wrong key. 1.2222 0.02307 117 97 19 1
2616 Let me explain it to you one more time, babe . . . Drone delivery uses GPS to target the house. You can see it's incredibly spot on. 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2617 Definitely not a-minor; more of a b-flat 1.2222 0.04640 117 98 13 6
2618 He never had a sense of scale. 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2619 That explains the eighty-eight note chord I heard last night. 1.2222 0.04873 117 97 14 6
2620 Remember when you said, "It'll be safer in the 'burbs"? 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2621 A stellar crescendo 1.2222 0.04396 117 94 20 3
2622 The downside of living next to Trump Tower. 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2623 Your right, moving to Kansas was a bad idea! 1.2222 0.04225 117 93 22 2
2624 Well...we always did want a piano .... 1.2222 0.04225 117 93 22 2
2625 There's always a hitch with these "free if you haul it away" Craigslist pianos. 1.2222 0.04225 117 93 22 2
2626 I didn't have this on my 2020 disaster calendar until November. 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2627 I had “tuba crushes suburban home” in my 2020 bingo card....so close... 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2628 Do you think we can return it for an upright? 1.2222 0.04873 117 97 14 6
2629 Maybe the drone delivery wasn't such a good idea. 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2630 I told you it was never going to fit. 1.2222 0.04873 117 97 14 6
2631 We shouldn't have opted for drone delivery. 1.2222 0.04396 117 94 20 3
2632 You’re right, that did sound like the end of A Day in the Life 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2633 And the piano movers weren't even wearing masks! 1.2222 0.04873 117 97 14 6
2634 It was a grand old house... 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2635 Once more. Fortissimo. 1.2222 0.03860 117 96 18 3
2636 wrong scale 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2637 Since it wasn't a tiny home I thought it would fit 1.2222 0.04396 117 96 17 4
2638 Seems a bit out of scale. 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2639 Oh, like you wouldn’t have clicked the box for same-day drone delivery. 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2640 Somewhere, some kid is going to miss his music lesson. 1.2222 0.04873 117 97 14 6
2641 On balance, I think cats and dogs would've been preferable. 1.2222 0.04396 117 94 20 3
2642 We shouldn't have ordered a drone delivery. 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2643 And, just so I’m clear, this Frank Gehry design is to scale? 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2644 Do you think they would mind if I played Twinkle twinkle little star? 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2645 There is going to be one helluva bill for the tune-up. 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2646 Maybe we should have gone with the upright. 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2647 This is not what I expected when the salesman said they could drop it off. 1.2222 0.04225 117 96 19 2
2648 Well it’s only minor scale damage compared to the rest of 2020 1.2222 0.04225 117 93 22 2
2649 Whatever, what’s for dinner? 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2650 Homeschooling was going well until we signed them up for piano. 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2651 Who broke my piano? 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2652 Should we get it tuned? 1.2222 0.04873 117 97 14 6
2653 I was trying to convince myself that my life isn’t a joke, and this really doesn’t help. 1.2222 0.04560 117 95 18 4
2654 I told you Beethoven had gone to Heaven. 1.2222 0.04719 117 96 16 5
2655 And YOU said it'd never fit. You owe me. 1.2212 0.04659 113 92 17 4
2656 I’m told Gabriel’s horn landed on the Peterson’s car 1.2212 0.04825 113 93 15 5
2657 This is quite unusual ... it has a low C. 1.2212 0.04825 113 93 15 5
2658 So, it wasn't exactly a curb side delivery 1.2212 0.04306 113 90 21 2
2659 On a scale of 1 to 88, this is certainly and 89. 1.2212 0.04659 113 92 17 4
2660 it seems drone delivery is not ready for prime time... 1.2203 0.04193 118 94 22 2
2661 The Piano Man: A 2020 Disaster Film 1.2203 0.04525 118 96 18 4
2662 I think your piano is flat. 1.2203 0.04683 118 97 16 5
2663 Next time I'll just download the MP3. 1.2203 0.04525 118 96 18 4
2664 Well, I'll admit it was my mistake to choose 'drone delivery' if you admit you selected 'Size: 4XL Grand' before you clicked the OK button. 1.2203 0.04362 118 95 20 3
2665 It looked so much smaller in the store... 1.2203 0.04525 118 96 18 4
2666 Jack was killed by a crockpot so I guess we should consider ourselves lucky 1.2203 0.04683 118 97 16 5
2667 Well, the Andersons will be playing a new tune about how much their house is worth now. 1.2203 0.04362 118 95 20 3
2668 Definitely a B Flat. 1.2203 0.04683 118 97 16 5
2669 If it was intentional, what does it mean? 1.2203 0.04525 118 96 18 4
2670 that's an F major 1.2203 0.04683 118 97 16 5
2671 I think we'll need a bigger drone 1.2203 0.04362 118 95 20 3
2672 I could have told them not to move it with drones. 1.2203 0.04982 118 99 12 7
2673 I thought heaven was all harps." 1.2203 0.04835 118 98 14 6
2674 1. "He really brought down the house tonight." 1.2203 0.04683 118 97 16 5
2675 WOW !! When they said "drop shipment" I never thought that's what they meant... 1.2203 0.04362 118 95 20 3
2676 I told you we should've gone with the upright. 1.2203 0.04193 118 94 22 2
2677 It was accompanied by a wind instrument. 1.2203 0.04982 118 99 12 7
2678 I'd say the piano Won! 1.2203 0.04683 118 97 16 5
2679 Dammit! All of our masks were in there... 1.2203 0.04683 118 97 16 5
2680 Well, they promised the tear down would be grand.” 1.2203 0.04362 118 95 20 3
2681 Too big for the attic, I guess. 1.2203 0.04525 118 96 18 4
2682 Legally, the piano belongs to the homeowner. 1.2203 0.04362 118 95 20 3
2683 ...and like a miracle it will just disappear! 1.2203 0.04525 118 96 18 4
2684 The owners said that if you end up taking the place, you can keep the piano. 1.2203 0.04362 118 95 20 3
2685 Looks like somebody wanted to make a grand entrance! 1.2203 0.04525 118 96 18 4
2686 Now we really don't have an excuse not to pick up a pandemic hobby. 1.2203 0.04982 118 99 12 7
2687 I am glad we had the Piano insured. 1.2203 0.04683 118 97 16 5
2688 Well isn't that just grand? 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2689 How come no candelabra? 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2690 Next time we pay for inside delivery. 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2691 I've been trying to take my music in a new direction. 1.2193 0.03892 114 89 25 0
2692 One day we'll look back on this and laugh. 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2693 It's times like this when I stop and think, what would Billy Joel do? 1.2193 0.04087 114 93 19 2
2694 I don't think we're covered for Acts of Liberace. 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2695 Good thing we have coverage against catastrophic acts of dissonance and atonality. 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2696 I need to check what our policy says under coverage against the Instrument of God. 1.2193 0.04946 114 95 13 6
2697 If music is the universal language ... what is this trying to tell us? 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2698 Did we give up when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2699 Now that’s what I call forte! 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2700 This house can no longer carry a tune. 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2701 She should have never called for Derecho fortissimo. 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2702 Isn’t it , “Grand” ! 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2703 They’re always in the last place you look. 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2704 They said he was an explosive performer. Brought down the house. 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2705 John Cage’s new album is haughtily aloof yet bluntly in-your-face. 1.2193 0.04946 114 95 13 6
2706 I swear if the neighbor comes out and plays his tiny violin.” 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2707 Told you that coyote would bring nothing but trouble. 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2708 Gotta look at the keys first to say whether the damage is major or minor. 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2709 Honey, this is Beethoven's final movement 1.2193 0.04087 114 90 23 1
2710 We'd better hurry home, that piano looks awfully familiar. 1.2193 0.04273 114 91 21 2
2711 I still think it hit the house in C. 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2712 You think the kids will be excited about their lessons now? 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2713 I told you it was too big for our living-room! 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2714 ...and l found some music on it that said "Play Me"! But as soon as I touched the a-flat, it grew bigger and bigger and.... 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2715 I warned you about moving in next to the Coyotes Mrs Runner. 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2716 See! Even people like Mozart or Beethoven can get frustrated sometimes. 1.2193 0.04273 114 91 21 2
2717 I do believe my calculations were off by a smidge. 1.2193 0.04087 114 90 23 1
2718 La Maison in B flat. 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2719 There is nothing funny about this!! 1.2193 0.05101 114 96 11 7
2720 Guess it was the wrong key! 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2721 Fell flat. 1.2193 0.04273 114 91 21 2
2722 Wow! It’s a grand slam! 1.2193 0.04622 114 95 14 5
2723 I told you to get ground delivery. 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2724 Wow, Talk about a crescendo! 1.2193 0.05101 114 96 11 7
2725 Composers are so emotional. 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2726 I should always listen to you - it is too big for the house. 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2727 Honey, do you think MOMA would consider it? 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2728 Well if this doesn't qualify as "sudden and unexpected" I don't know what would. 1.2193 0.04273 114 91 21 2
2729 Well, that performance was a tour de force 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2730 I’d call it “Grand Piano in Heat.” 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2731 Rachmaninoff's Second Piano Concerto Always Brings the House Down. 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2732 "Ironic that what finally did the old woman in was a piano from the Kansas Witch-Killing Piano Company." 1.2193 0.04451 114 94 16 4
2733 So ... that’s how they got that final chord in “ A day in the life” 1.2193 0.04946 114 95 13 6
2734 Well that concert really brought down the house! 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2735 WOW TALK ABOUT CLIMATE CHANGE. THE TORNADO THAT LANDED HERE IN ARKANSAS STARTED IN MANHATTAN 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2736 And not even a note from the delivery men... 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2737 Definitely a Steinway. 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2738 Probably Tchaikovsky. 1.2193 0.04273 114 91 21 2
2739 In Kansas they'd have dropped a house on us! 1.2193 0.04273 114 91 21 2
2740 they brought down the house last night 1.2193 0.04946 114 95 13 6
2741 They called it a fixer-upper. 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2742 Now, that’s destruction on a grand scale! 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2743 You told me you were going to sign up for a crash course in piano! 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2744 In the grand scheme of things, maybe all life is performance art! 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2745 I told you there was no way the thing would fit! 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2746 When you tickle the ivories, some ivories are more ticklish than you think. 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2747 I think it’s fair to say, at least for the foreseeable future, this cute little home will b-flat. 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2748 It was a baby grand when they bought it 1.2193 0.04622 114 93 17 4
2749 Grand Entrance Causes A-Major Disaster! 1.2193 0.04451 114 92 19 3
2750 They said they were going to throw in the piano too. 1.2193 0.04273 114 91 21 2
2751 Honey! I thought you were kidding when you said that Concert brought down the house. 1.2193 0.04451 114 96 13 5
2752 I see Jerry Lee Lewis has left The Heavenly Choir again. 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5
2753 They were told to evacuate, now they'll have to face the music. 1.2193 0.04787 114 94 15 5