Contest #718


Cartoon

718

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “I don’t need your approval. I just need you to tie the laces.”
  2. “I don’t think ‘dressage’ means what you think it means.”
  3. “Because they don’t need to be nailed to my feet, that’s why.”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2020-07-26T21:56:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2020-08-16T21:58:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2020-08-10T21:57:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued August 17, 2020
Number of captions 9176
Number of responses 1929624
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 I don't think 'dressage' means what you think it means. 2.0644 0.00590 17969 5124 6587 6258
1 I don't need your approval. I just need you to tie the laces. 2.0465 0.00554 20448 6053 7435 6960
2 It’s genius! They’ll be tracking 2 men on foot! 2.0434 0.00579 19594 6112 6560 6922
3 Because they don't need to be nailed to my feet, that's why. 2.0405 0.00639 15718 4774 5552 5392
4 His suspicions proved true once he saw the shoes. She was a night mare. 1.9989 0.01026 6154 1996 2169 1989
5 The hat is a bit much. 1.9902 0.01146 4905 1605 1743 1557
6 Dude, I'm a horse and I'm talking and the first question you ask is, why I am wearing shoes that don't match? 1.9842 0.00636 17481 6385 5022 6074
7 Technically, they're still horseshoes. 1.9669 0.00597 17023 5553 6517 4953
8 I think that will be our last visit to Rodeo Drive. 1.9570 0.00710 12768 4469 4411 3888
9 I couldn't decide between the ruby slippers and the blue suede shoes, and then realized I didn't have to. 1.9565 0.00681 14216 5059 4740 4417
10 My horse sense said ‘whoa’ but my fashion sense said ‘giddy-up.’ 1.9531 0.00758 11501 4117 3824 3560
11 Thanks. Those heels were killing me." 1.9404 0.01102 5071 1721 1931 1419
12 Your hat looks ridiculous 1.9099 0.00886 8476 3248 2753 2475
13 I like it, I just don’t think I have the right saddle. 1.9094 0.01146 4493 1547 1806 1140
14 No, I didn’t get my bangs cut. Something else. Think. 1.9061 0.00710 13149 5045 4299 3805
15 I'm going as two people in a horse costume. 1.9054 0.00727 12610 4869 4073 3668
16 The front ones are for work. The back ones are just for kicks. 1.8942 0.00863 8573 3240 3002 2331
17 You have redefined ranch dressing. 1.8914 0.00775 11180 4436 3527 3217
18 Yeah?..Well, I think your hat looks stupid! 1.8884 0.00770 11035 4328 3626 3081
19 Did I just hear a discouraging word? 1.8881 0.00818 9830 3856 3224 2750
20 You should talk. Look at that hat. 1.8814 0.00639 15072 5719 5459 3894
21 I was really hoping for Saddle Shoes. 1.8740 0.00775 10954 4426 3500 3028
22 Sure Jed, act like you haven’t also been ordering things you don’t need on Amazon... 1.8631 0.00808 9667 3830 3340 2497
23 The blacksmith? His name is Manolo. 1.8560 0.01243 4221 1724 1381 1116
24 If we pull this off, there’ll be one confused posse searching the desert for a couple of eight hundred pound women. 1.8536 0.00837 9390 3907 2964 2519
25 Sorry, I’m no longer that horse you rode in on. 1.8343 0.00873 8185 3376 2803 2006
26 Look, herding your cattle was a fine job. But dancing is my passion. 1.8068 0.01025 5895 2503 2028 1364
27 Oh, you're home early. 1.8024 0.00957 7129 3200 2150 1779
28 It's called dressing for the job you WANT. 1.7937 0.00996 6151 2647 2129 1375
29 But my real desire is to be a show horse 1.7904 0.01289 3649 1568 1278 803
30 Slip-ons vs nail-ons, which would you choose? 1.7884 0.00981 6436 2852 2109 1475
31 It was a spur of the moment purchase. 1.7865 0.00908 7308 3166 2544 1598
32 OK, I walked a mile in your shoes. Now what? 1.7862 0.02550 968 430 315 223
33 People change, Dave. 1.7849 0.00932 6982 3056 2383 1543
34 For the last time....STAY OUT OF MY CLOSET!! 1.7831 0.01249 4144 1910 1240 994
35 Sure, but don't expect me to get above a canter until I break these in. 1.7797 0.00871 7340 3049 2866 1425
36 I’m a clothes horse, so shoe me. 1.7768 0.01075 5725 2676 1651 1398
37 Sometimes, Buck, I just like to feel pretty. 1.7756 0.01039 5654 2508 1910 1236
38 Oh, says the man wearing white after labor day? 1.7749 0.01043 5696 2560 1862 1274
39 It’s not blue, it’s cerulean 1.7678 0.01327 3703 1755 1063 885
40 These will work for tap, modern, jazz, and canter. 1.7676 0.01443 2883 1278 997 608
41 Now I only need a shirt and a facemask to get service. 1.7670 0.01478 2919 1349 901 669
42 The Blacksmith's in quarantine. 1.7523 0.01216 4202 1954 1335 913
43 Nice hat. I'm guessing it's not nailed to your head. 1.7500 0.01581 2620 1267 741 612
44 Well I’ll be damned. I could’ve sworn I’d ordered me a couple of mules 1.7486 0.01609 2395 1119 759 517
45 Dude...I'm a TALKING horse. Nobody's going to notice the shoes. 1.7464 0.01172 4463 2082 1434 947
46 I'm guessing by the look of it this is your first rodeo. 1.7438 0.00861 8116 3780 2648 1688
47 Before you get mad—they were buy one get one. 1.7415 0.01179 4120 1849 1487 784
48 The farrier has been closed since the pandemic started... believe me you do NOT want to see these hooves. 1.7390 0.01608 2379 1123 754 502
49 You know what they say: Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have. 1.7376 0.00856 7958 3682 2700 1576
50 They look purple when I'm galloping. 1.7337 0.01038 5752 2778 1738 1236
51 That Clippity Clop, Clippity Clop was driving me crazy! 1.7278 0.02968 632 285 234 113
52 I got tired of you always picking out my shoes. 1.7178 0.01535 2505 1192 828 485
53 Do they make my ankles look fat? 1.7117 0.01110 5029 2491 1497 1041
54 Mare Jordans. 1.7090 0.01262 4027 2050 1101 876
55 Try not to make this all about you. 1.6964 0.01006 6083 3092 1753 1238
56 No. Horseshoes, NOT horse shoes. 1.6942 0.01391 3371 1781 845 745
57 You knew I was a clothes horse. 1.6938 0.01081 5040 2506 1577 957
58 ...well I bought one pair, so the second was hoof price ! 1.6885 0.01661 2308 1206 615 487
59 If you like iron shoes so much, YOU wear them. 1.6884 0.01133 4531 2259 1431 841
60 Thanks. Nice hat. 1.6837 0.01119 4455 2200 1476 779
61 My eyes are up here mister. 1.6825 0.01298 3540 1795 1074 671
62 Why do you care that they don't match? It's a Zoom rodeo! 1.6802 0.01235 4065 2117 1131 817
63 Look, these will have to do until the blacksmith becomes an "essential employee"! 1.6764 0.01204 3953 1980 1273 700
64 The blacksmith was closed, so I went to Nordstrom. 1.6736 0.01225 3882 1980 1193 709
65 For the last time. You want the B-R-I-D-L-E Shop, not the B-R-I-D-A-L Shop." 1.6725 0.01470 2788 1447 808 533
66 They're called mules, not horse shoes. 1.6692 0.01405 2996 1547 894 555
67 Who cares?? You’re a gelding. 1.6673 0.01661 2284 1226 592 466
68 I feel pretty, and witty, and neigh. 1.6667 0.01391 3093 1613 898 582
69 He said he knew how to shoe horses. He was the best. Nobody shoed horses like him. He was a stable genius. Well look. Are you happy now? 1.6642 0.02736 816 432 226 158
70 Sorry - I only do the 2 step. 1.6620 0.01539 2565 1359 714 492
71 You’ve always been a neigh-sayer. 1.6604 0.01773 1929 1023 538 368
72 Now before you say anything I got them on sale. 1.6586 0.01137 4297 2184 1399 714
73 They're close to matching and that counts in horseshoes. 1.6572 0.01199 4096 2151 1199 746
74 The look really comes alive at a gallop. 1.6565 0.01213 3968 2073 1185 710
75 I'm thinking of adding a halter top. 1.6554 0.01345 3299 1768 908 623
76 Which pair goes with the saddle? It’s my first rodeo. 1.6484 0.01487 2668 1423 761 484
77 That Clippity Clop sound was driving me nuts. 1.6477 0.01278 3409 1764 1083 562
78 Do you think he’ll finally notice me? 1.6475 0.01720 2000 1068 569 363
79 I traded with two kids who wanted to play horseshoes. 1.6406 0.01593 2265 1206 668 391
80 I've always felt different, even as a foal. 1.6403 0.01310 3375 1802 985 588
81 I guess this really is your first rodeo. 1.6398 0.01258 3640 1946 1062 632
82 No, Buttercup. Red port. Green starboard. 1.6388 0.01801 1941 1088 466 387
83 It’s 2020, Frank. My hooves, my choice 1.6387 0.03683 429 230 124 75
84 Late Night? 1.6384 0.01577 2373 1299 643 431
85 This explains the charge on my American Express. 1.6379 0.01790 1886 1035 499 352
86 Why yes, I am a clothes horse. 1.6369 0.01200 3803 1999 1193 611
87 You said business casual, so I went with the flats. 1.6366 0.01309 3233 1698 1013 522
88 Never be late for a blacksmith appointment. 1.6349 0.01262 3583 1917 1058 608
89 All the regular shoes are being used for lawn games. 1.6327 0.01864 1759 979 447 333
90 Okay then, what is dressage? 1.6323 0.01906 1534 813 472 249
91 Is that what you're wearin'? 1.6301 0.01769 1887 1035 515 337
92 Sorry, but with the lock-down the blacksmith can't get here. 1.6251 0.01766 1859 1018 520 321
93 I’m not a shopaholic. I’m helping the economy. 1.6251 0.01685 2107 1188 531 388
94 We're all adjusting. 1.6238 0.01921 1507 809 456 242
95 What? You wanted matchy matchy? 1.6230 0.01943 1594 893 409 292
96 Wait till you see the matching saddle-bags! 1.6207 0.01397 2953 1627 821 505
97 At least you don't have 2 Left FEET 1.6206 0.01654 2301 1338 505 458
98 We need to git you a light in yer stall. 1.6204 0.01653 2176 1230 552 394
99 It’s only two more miles. Are your blisters that bad or do we need to Uber? 1.6151 0.01931 1603 906 408 289
100 My front end is Democrat, my ass end Republican. 1.6147 0.02148 1303 741 324 238
101 One pair was $19.95 - but wait, if I acted now I got a second pair free - plus a Gene Autry CD. 1.6137 0.01532 2604 1493 624 487
102 That was a discouraging word. 1.6129 0.01907 1550 855 441 254
103 why are you wearing my Condom? 1.6120 0.01902 1830 1101 340 389
104 ... because it wouldn't make sense if one pair was on your right side and the other one on your left side! 1.6062 0.02005 1506 869 361 276
105 Who needs luck when you have, FABULOUS! 1.6050 0.01665 2276 1345 485 446
106 You have the wrong shoes on. Tonight is the rodeo, tomorrow is the dressage. 1.6030 0.01510 2494 1403 679 412
107 I can't really trot in them, but they look fabulous. 1.6010 0.01504 2351 1281 727 343
108 Listen, it’s fine this time but you gotta start asking before you borrow my clothes. 1.6010 0.01444 2644 1467 765 412
109 Rodeo Drive. Where else? 1.6003 0.01583 2119 1170 632 317
110 Yea or nay? 1.5996 0.01862 1576 872 463 241
111 That's the problem with this newfangled speech recognition - ask for Horseshoes, get Whore's Shoes. 1.5993 0.01657 2281 1362 474 445
112 What else was I supposed to do? You hung my only good pair of shoes up on the wall because apparently they’re ‘good luck.’ 1.5987 0.01599 2260 1291 586 383
113 Listen carefully: Horseshoes. Not whore’s shoes. Horseshoes. 1.5986 0.01558 2499 1460 582 457
114 You've been to Brokeback Mountain again, haven't you? 1.5977 0.01663 2185 1276 512 397
115 Why? Because my flip-flops wouldn't stay on. 1.5971 0.01658 2040 1151 561 328
116 What’s more ridiculous, a horse pretending he’s human or an accountant pretending he’s a cowboy? 1.5942 0.01887 1523 847 447 229
117 It's up to you. Either Mr. Ed or Mrs. Ed 1.5942 0.02085 1412 836 313 263
118 These are from my spaghetti western days, made in Italy 1.5916 0.01781 1768 1004 482 282
119 The metal ones don't dazzle like my personality. 1.5912 0.02100 1370 808 314 248
120 That back pair must have come from a horse of a different color. 1.5910 0.01542 2210 1250 627 333
121 Have I been through the desert on a horse with no shame? 1.5894 0.02210 1191 691 298 202
122 No, horses are not color blind. Why do you ask? 1.5887 0.01669 1957 1104 555 298
123 You don't say anything about my shoes, and I won't say anything about that stupid hat you're wearing! 1.5867 0.01613 2030 1136 600 294
124 The dressage judges are not going to like this. 1.5864 0.02020 1378 790 368 220
125 “Well at least I’m not wearing that stupid hat...” 1.5861 0.01637 2049 1162 573 314
126 Actually, it wasn't that hard. I just typed in "horseshoes" and clicked on "place my order' 1.5851 0.01842 1692 985 426 281
127 Good news they found the matching saddle bag. 1.5850 0.01670 2000 1145 540 315
128 Ready for the Easter Parade? 1.5817 0.01860 1841 1138 338 365
129 Yay or neigh? 1.5805 0.01839 1633 937 444 252
130 Seriously? I will not be seen in public with you and that hat. 1.5801 0.01708 1791 1004 536 251
131 Try nailing iron shoes on to your feet and see how you like it. 1.5786 0.01761 1737 988 493 256
132 While we're on the subject, let's talk about your hat. 1.5781 0.01778 1735 996 475 264
133 I thought we had an agreement that I'd stay out of your stall and you out of my closet. 1.5749 0.01816 1562 875 476 211
134 All the advice columns said that continuing to dress up during a pandemic would help me retain a sense of normalcy. 1.5745 0.01751 1650 935 489 226
135 I suppose you want your credit card back? 1.5738 0.01936 1422 811 406 205
136 DressBarn door closed after 2-for-1 sale. 1.5731 0.01881 1689 1038 346 305
137 I'm kind of partial to the prairie pink. 1.5722 0.02183 1239 744 281 214
138 Remember, they have to be rotated every fifteen thousand. 1.5717 0.02110 1228 711 332 185
139 And my pronoun of choice is 'they.' 1.5713 0.01844 1614 942 424 248
140 I do recognize your innate talents. I just can’t afford tap dance lessons right now. 1.5704 0.01849 1620 946 424 250
141 In a one-horse town it's important I don't show a political preference. 1.5701 0.01856 1577 915 426 236
142 You humans don’t have any sense of fashion whatsoever! 1.5696 0.02006 1552 967 290 295
143 I'll take you to the barn dance ... If you/ll teach me the Texas Four Step. 1.5694 0.02135 1289 778 289 222
144 I just couldn't decide yay or neigh... 1.5689 0.01926 1582 952 360 270
145 I could have sworn you said Rodeo Drive. 1.5685 0.01926 1532 908 377 247
146 You always told me: If the shoe fits, wear it! 1.5680 0.01954 1477 873 369 235
147 The same place you got your hat. 1.5657 0.01907 1377 779 420 178
148 It’s to confuse the trackers. 1.5642 0.01872 1471 839 434 198
149 Oh like you could pass up a BOGO sale.. 1.5642 0.01886 1464 841 421 202
150 Person. Man. Fence. Horse. Loafers. 1.5628 0.02123 1281 772 297 212
151 Of course they’re Jimmy Choos...didn’t you know boarding a horse was expensive? 1.5627 0.02018 1436 871 322 243
152 Nice hat. 1.5618 0.02045 1271 743 344 184
153 Sooo...yeah...I run the 50 meter AND the 200 1.5618 0.02081 1417 886 269 262
154 It's been a day, cowboy. 1.5617 0.02233 1200 737 252 211
155 I see you put our stimulus check to good use. 1.5609 0.02055 1355 818 315 222
156 When I see a pair I like, I buy them in another color. 1.5603 0.01940 1385 799 396 190
157 I'm a Filipino first lady trapped in a horse's body. 1.5602 0.02124 1353 841 266 246
158 Democrats up front. Republicans to the rear - where they belong. 1.5591 0.02087 1354 831 290 233
159 I’m literally talking right now, and your only question is about the shoes? 1.5570 0.02073 1210 701 344 165
160 I think it's become clear you shouldn't be making fashion choices for either of us, Bill. 1.5564 0.02080 1242 731 331 180
161 You're not in Kansas anymore, Seabiscuit 1.5554 0.02418 992 606 221 165
162 Can I borrow your hat? 1.5542 0.02203 1189 726 267 196
163 My old shoes just weren’t lucky any more, 1.5532 0.02023 1240 735 332 173
164 Too Christmassy? 1.5532 0.02172 1240 763 268 209
165 And it's your turn to wear the saddle. 1.5532 0.02172 1240 765 265 210
166 Thanks, but this isn't what I meant when I said I wanted new shoes for Christmas! 1.5526 0.02252 1178 733 239 206
167 They're not tap shoes. The front ones are clip shoes and the back ones are clop shoes. 1.5516 0.02070 1222 719 333 170
168 Best tell Gertie they’re synthetic leather 1.5513 0.02214 1208 750 250 208
169 Hey, going on Queer Eye was YOUR idea! 1.5508 0.02172 1200 730 279 191
170 I’m too haute to trot. 1.5503 0.02281 1034 615 269 150
171 So who made you a member of the Fashion Posse? 1.5494 0.02216 1154 709 258 187
172 The saleswoman said they brought out the brown in my eyes. 1.5488 0.02311 1024 615 256 153
173 Democrats ride forward but Republicans ride backward. 1.5488 0.02390 1086 692 192 202
174 I don't care what you think. You try hammering nails into the bottom of your feet! 1.5484 0.02061 1167 694 315 158
175 They say to never judge man until you've walked a mile in ... oh, never mind. 1.5472 0.02256 1144 709 244 191
176 Okay Dusty, I get you're sick of clippity-clop, but is tippity-tap really any better? 1.5467 0.02203 1145 695 274 176
177 Call me a fashion horse but I had to have them. 1.5460 0.02243 1130 694 255 181
178 In fact they do spark joy. 1.5458 0.02399 852 490 259 103
179 Do the green ones make my fetlocks look fat? 1.5454 0.02091 1124 690 272 162
180 Okay, which ones make my hooves look smaller? 1.5441 0.02122 1099 649 307 143
181 Worst gender reveal party ever. 1.5440 0.02221 1103 676 258 169
182 How did you find out that Payless Shoes is closing? 1.5431 0.02349 1079 680 212 187
183 So I’m afraid I’ll be joining the circus 1.5431 0.02331 1079 680 214 185
184 I tried them with socks, but they didn't look right" 1.5430 0.02214 1081 646 283 152
185 I've been rented for a gender reveal party. 1.5423 0.02292 1064 652 247 165
186 You said I could borrow anything in your closet. 1.5422 0.02308 1066 658 238 170
187 They're comfortable and that's what matters. 1.5419 0.02131 1063 614 323 126
188 So you’re sayin’ the hat’s a bit much? 1.5416 0.02147 1069 643 282 144
189 I’ll take off the shoes, Mitch, when you stop dtessing up like John Wayne. 1.5416 0.02235 1058 633 277 148
190 I’ve got a date tonight, Tex. Can I borrow the car? 1.5416 0.02408 1058 678 187 193
191 Let's hit the trail, Doodah, them Camptown Ladies ain't gonna wait all night! 1.5411 0.02373 1059 670 205 184
192 I think the expression is "that's a horse of a different color," not "horseshoe." 1.5410 0.02400 1048 667 195 186
193 It’s Polo by Ralph Lauren 1.5406 0.02273 1047 636 257 154
194 ...Well I think that hat makes you look silly! 1.5395 0.02208 1025 608 284 133
195 For some reason they only come in sets of two. 1.5395 0.02336 1025 633 232 160
196 You probably won't need pants for those Zoom meetings either. 1.5390 0.02295 1026 625 250 151
197 No, you can’t have a purse. You’ll have a saddlebag like the other horses. 1.5389 0.02248 1028 613 276 139
198 You were right, the heels were a bad idea. 1.5389 0.02205 1028 603 296 129
199 I've told you several times, it's not that kind of horse show. 1.5372 0.02286 1007 608 258 141
200 I beg your pardon. Any shoe on a horse IS a horse shoe. 1.5366 0.02283 969 573 272 124
201 I don't know who I am either. 1.5364 0.02371 990 611 227 152
202 I like the preppy look, without socks. 1.5360 0.02372 987 609 227 151
203 Amazon got the order wrong, but return shipping is such a hassle. 1.5353 0.02315 977 588 255 134
204 I'm OK with 'em, as long as you don't laugh at my hat. 1.5352 0.02409 981 613 211 157
205 I see your blacksmith is moonlighting at the discount shoe outlet again. 1.5351 0.02517 968 631 158 179
206 When they nail that hat to your head, then we'll talk about frivolous fashion choices. 1.5337 0.03175 534 326 131 77
207 It’s about time you knew the truth about who I am. 1.5336 0.02469 922 574 204 144
208 But, they're the latest thing! They're "Mules." 1.5335 0.02307 956 575 254 127
209 The cartoonist and his kid are both working from home right now. 1.5333 0.02446 960 604 200 156
210 It's not Mr. Ed, just Ed. 1.5333 0.02441 947 591 207 149
211 It's hard to shop for shoes in my size 1.5330 0.02275 955 583 243 129
212 What can I say? It was a BOGO. 1.5324 0.02381 941 576 230 135
213 You can take the girl out of New York City, but you can’t take New York City out of the girl 1.5323 0.02510 868 535 204 129
214 The gel insterts are a game changer. The colors just make me happy. 1.5322 0.02313 932 552 264 116
215 Don’t worry about it, no one will notice. 1.5322 0.02536 932 599 170 163
216 And I'm like, why should the dear and the antelope have all the fun? 1.5321 0.02320 936 557 260 119
217 Your hat’s on backwards 1.5321 0.02518 936 599 176 161
218 Ferragamo, why? 1.5315 0.02480 937 592 192 153
219 I hope you realize that you’re going to have to take all of those off to get through security. 1.5315 0.02313 937 557 262 118
220 Horse, man, hat, shoes, TV. 1.5312 0.02503 928 594 177 157
221 The blacksmith wore Prada 1.5309 0.02383 921 558 237 126
222 Last time I use a farrier from Paris. 1.5305 0.02334 918 561 233 124
223 This is work, Blaze. Not a fashion show. 1.5301 0.02439 913 563 216 134
224 Congratulations, you're having twins. 1.5297 0.02608 908 594 147 167
225 He said he was the Shoe Fairy. 1.5292 0.02559 909 585 167 157
226 They're saddle shoes, what did you expect? 1.5283 0.02504 901 567 192 142
227 You never take me out anymore. 1.5280 0.02572 820 507 193 120
228 Oh please! Don't act like you didn't do any online shopping while in quarantine. 1.5280 0.02358 894 540 239 115
229 I see by your outfit that you are a cowboy. 1.5276 0.02565 887 567 172 148
230 Comfort, quality, style—we're going to disrupt the horseshoe industry! 1.5268 0.02443 877 535 222 120
231 I’m a clothes horse, what’s your excuse? 1.5267 0.02393 879 535 228 116
232 If I'm wearing them, they're horseshoes. Okay? 1.5265 0.02347 849 499 255 95
233 It's going to be impossible keeping those clean 1.5263 0.02570 874 557 174 143
234 My date and I would like to enter the two stepping competition? 1.5261 0.02677 863 568 136 159
235 I just can’t resist a buy one, get one free sale. 1.5259 0.02556 869 550 181 138
236 My mother always voted Republican to cancel out my dad's vote. 1.5256 0.02730 858 574 117 167
237 Just because I was born in a barn doesn’t mean I have to dress like it 1.5255 0.02347 862 506 259 97
238 What? They didn't tell you I was color blind? 1.5255 0.02474 864 533 209 122
239 Embarrassed?! You're a Republican. 1.5251 0.02588 855 544 173 138
240 These should throw them off of our trail! 1.5248 0.02213 846 520 229 97
241 oh, you were serious about changing how you identify 1.5247 0.02664 850 554 146 150
242 Done with rounding up doggies, Sam. Goin’ dancing. 1.5247 0.02480 850 523 210 117
243 It behooves me to have to explain. 1.5242 0.02435 826 492 235 99
244 I think it’s time we talk about these quarantine purchases. 1.5242 0.02564 847 533 184 130
245 It's called dressage, Bob. 1.5241 0.02455 849 515 223 111
246 I'm a talking horse, and you still mucked-up my order! 1.5241 0.02677 851 558 140 153
247 They cost a little more but the stallions have been saying good things. 1.5238 0.02470 842 512 219 111
248 For the barn dance. Piggy pink or cornflower blue? 1.5238 0.02314 842 528 204 110
249 I couldn’t decide between take me to Kansas or take me dancing. 1.5237 0.02647 844 546 154 144
250 Blahnik or Choo 1.5234 0.02770 835 561 111 163
251 I may be one quarter horse, Jeb, but I'm three quarters fabulous! 1.5230 0.02569 782 477 201 104
252 I wasn't sure what you were going to wear 1.5228 0.02623 834 533 166 135
253 You would too if you had two left feet. 1.5224 0.02612 825 523 173 129
254 Oh, Freddie. That’s not what I meant by “I’d love ya more if you just made an effort sometimes.” 1.5223 0.02760 829 554 117 158
255 Wait till you see what she's done to the cows. 1.5221 0.02740 747 473 158 116
256 The inner soles are so much more comfortable than iron 1.5220 0.02520 820 503 206 111
257 It’s buy one get one. 1.5219 0.02648 822 527 161 134
258 Of course they're Oxfords, what else would you expect with an English saddle? 1.5217 0.02557 736 437 214 85
259 If you insist on wearing that ridiculous hat, I’m keeping the shoes! 1.5215 0.02429 815 484 237 94
260 I thought only the Devil wore Prada... 1.5209 0.02611 814 514 176 124
261 When I asked you to "put yourself in my shoes" I didn't mean it literally! 1.5205 0.02485 782 466 225 91
262 What? I'm quadcurious. Get over it. 1.5204 0.02743 807 531 132 144
263 I have never complained about YOUR choice of boots. 1.5202 0.02649 815 527 154 134
264 Fashion? Nay. Color-coded orthotics. 1.5194 0.02753 797 524 132 141
265 They didn’t have four in your size? 1.5194 0.02620 801 510 168 123
266 You don’t have to do a thing. They are Velcro. 1.5188 0.02615 796 500 179 117
267 No, I'm not happy. I asked for crocs. 1.5182 0.02654 797 508 165 124
268 Well happy trails to you too Wilbur. 1.5178 0.02610 786 491 183 112
269 Had I known, I would have worn my party hat.” 1.5174 0.02658 777 491 170 116
270 I thought you were looking for a horse or a different shoe color. 1.5174 0.02885 777 529 94 154
271 I thought we're heading to the city? 1.5173 0.02585 781 483 192 106
272 No, I wouldn't say they're sensible. 1.5172 0.02620 787 494 179 114
273 This way they'll never know that it was a man on a horse! 1.5172 0.02705 787 510 148 129
274 Oh, yeah? Well, you're all saddle and no horse. 1.5168 0.02866 772 521 103 148
275 Wait til you see how fast they make me run! 1.5168 0.02687 772 494 158 120
276 My rear end supports Republicans. My front end, the Democrats. 1.5168 0.02591 776 485 183 108
277 And the best part is, they’re not nailed on. 1.5167 0.02565 747 451 206 90
278 If you're wearing that hat, I'm wearing these shoes 1.5167 0.02448 778 460 234 84
279 Just because you’re wearing them and calling them horse shoes it doesn’t make them horseshoes. 1.5163 0.02679 738 460 175 103
280 A blacksmith wasn’t good enough for you. No, you had to order from QVC. 1.5163 0.02833 769 513 115 141
281 Don't fence me in. 1.5162 0.02617 771 480 184 107
282 Let's face it, Bob. This isn't the worst thing you've caught me doing. 1.5157 0.02561 762 464 203 95
283 Yes, calfskin loafers. Why are you asking, cowboy? 1.5157 0.02529 764 476 188 100
284 Girl I told you! Clint doesn't make Western movies anymore. This insane crush of yours has to stop. 1.5157 0.02908 764 521 92 151
285 I went bowling and someone stole my shoes. 1.5157 0.02610 766 475 187 104
286 What's the matter? Don't you like aquamarine with cerise? 1.5156 0.02763 768 501 138 129
287 And you don't look ridiculous in that hat? 1.5155 0.02125 772 483 210 79
288 I’m so tired of just being known as the “roan mare.” 1.5152 0.02776 757 493 138 126
289 Never mind the shoes. What's up with the English saddle? 1.5152 0.02500 759 453 221 85
290 When they said you're a horse of another color, I certainly didn't imagine this 1.5152 0.02789 759 497 133 129
291 I warned you about that blacksmith on Rodeo Drive! 1.5151 0.02733 761 490 150 121
292 Dressage for the job you want, not the job you have. 1.5151 0.02735 728 460 161 107
293 Nobody wears socks anymore Bill 1.5146 0.02637 756 471 181 104
294 Did you put those on in the dark? 1.5145 0.02685 760 487 158 115
295 My previous owner was Imelda Marcos 1.5141 0.02572 747 454 202 91
296 (Can’t get no) Satis-traction. 1.5140 0.02967 749 517 79 153
297 Wait, did the song say red suede or blue? 1.5140 0.02581 749 467 183 99
298 Maybe with a different coat? 1.5140 0.02687 751 477 163 111
299 Hired a new farrier. 1.5139 0.02788 755 494 134 127
300 What? It’s Fun Night at the OK Corral. 1.5139 0.02725 755 484 154 117
301 you're never gonna win at horseshoes with those. 1.5133 0.02847 750 499 117 134
302 They tried to sell me argyle socks, but that would have looked ridiculous 1.5129 0.02626 737 454 188 95
303 It simplifies things. 1.5129 0.02877 737 494 109 134
304 As long as you're comfortable, that's all that matters. 1.5129 0.02776 737 476 144 117
305 "It was buy one get one so I thought, "what the hay?" 1.5123 0.02583 732 444 201 87
306 They don't fit as well as horseshoes, but Zappos is just so convenient." 1.5123 0.02818 732 478 133 121
307 This is literally your worst idea yet. 1.5123 0.02838 734 483 126 125
308 Horse: This 6 ft. distance is killing me, Paul. Paul: I didn't know you cared...or that you could speak. 1.5122 0.02972 736 506 83 147
309 Do these shoes make my tail look big? 1.5122 0.02773 736 475 145 116
310 Blacksmith"? I thought you said "Blahnik".. 1.5122 0.02793 736 478 139 119
311 I’m coming out as non-binary” 1.5122 0.02786 736 477 141 118
312 I have a feeling we are not in Kansas anymore... 1.5122 0.02774 740 479 143 118
313 You're the one who had me gelded. 1.5121 0.02898 662 424 137 101
314 I’m just saying the saddle doesn’t complete the ensemble. 1.5116 0.02834 731 480 128 123
315 What do you mean I have to wear a mask? 1.5116 0.02754 731 468 152 111
316 They don't match the saddle. 1.5116 0.02847 731 482 124 125
317 Hang on to your hat Earl, I'm about to tell you if it's a foal or a filly. 1.5111 0.02806 718 464 141 113
318 It's not that easy, they're only sold in pairs. 1.5111 0.02801 722 467 141 114
319 They might not match but at least they don't have to be nailed on. 1.5111 0.02565 722 434 207 81
320 hey get off of my blue suede hoofs 1.5111 0.02948 722 489 97 136
321 My blacksmith is Questioning. 1.5110 0.02830 726 475 131 120
322 It's tough shopping when you have two left feet. 1.5108 0.02710 697 432 174 91
323 I don't feel the pressure to identify either way. Plus, I love that they don't have be nailed on! 1.5101 0.02845 692 446 139 107
324 Oh wonderful, now we’re NOT going bowling. 1.5101 0.02845 692 446 139 107
325 You're just mad because I went into town without you. 1.5100 0.02755 702 443 160 99
326 You should see my blanket. 1.5098 0.02725 712 448 165 99
327 No, the shoes are fine, I just think gender reveals are overdone. 1.5098 0.02861 716 471 125 120
328 What happens on Fire Island stays on Fire Island. 1.5091 0.02697 713 448 168 97
329 Mules? really? 1.5091 0.02673 715 444 178 93
330 That’s 6 ft alright. 1.5091 0.02877 715 477 114 124
331 . . . I tried 'em on and, long story short, people stopped saying "Why the long face?" every time I walked into a bar. 1.5086 0.02895 582 360 150 72
332 When I tap the heels of the blue ones together, we go where you want to go, and when I tap the heels of the red ones together, we go where I want to go. 1.5085 0.02740 702 442 163 97
333 Well, that's the last time I get shoed in Austin... 1.5085 0.02836 704 457 136 111
334 ...and I've ordered a tutu. 1.5085 0.02887 710 470 119 121
335 Get off your high...um, heels. We’ve got work to do. 1.5079 0.02900 695 458 121 116
336 Well, they make cutting cows from the herd a lot easier." 1.5079 0.02872 697 456 128 113
337 Oh what like your gloves always match your shoes? It's basically the same thing, Bob. And it's fine to have a little flair, not that you'd know anything about that. You embarrass me, you boring, vanilla, sad sack of shit. 1.5079 0.02943 697 466 108 123
338 you look ridiculous with that hat Frank 1.5078 0.02759 703 446 157 100
339 Manure! You've been to the farrier again. Where are you getting the oats? I'm not hoofing around. You're not stable. Neigh, I'm unhitching my wagon and rolling on. Let them put you out to pasture. Use your own horse sense and lose those dumb shoes. 1.5072 0.03139 690 488 54 148
340 And then she said, "Try walking a mile in MY shoes." 1.5072 0.02660 690 422 186 82
341 Which do you like better? I'm taking a gallop poll. 1.5072 0.02686 692 427 179 86
342 You realize those shoes are made from horse leather. 1.5072 0.02845 692 448 137 107
343 This isn't what you meant by horse shoes? 1.5072 0.02883 696 457 125 114
344 Sorry, Bart... I like roping, but I love tap. 1.5072 0.02635 696 424 191 81
345 These look much better on you Darlin’ than they did on my first wife. 1.5072 0.02883 696 457 125 114
346 I see you’ve been to Rodeo Drive again. 1.5072 0.02669 698 430 182 86
347 Yes, if you must know. It is my first rodeo. 1.5068 0.02594 659 404 183 72
348 Mr Ed couldn't keep his secret any longer; he WAS a show pony and proud of it! 1.5066 0.02816 687 440 146 101
349 I know what you're thinking. These looked totally different online. 1.5062 0.02648 642 381 197 64
350 Hooves are just so Boomer. 1.5059 0.02951 680 452 112 116
351 The blue goes with my eyes and the red is for kicking up my heels. 1.5059 0.02900 682 447 125 110
352 The salesman said all the European horses are wearing them. 1.5059 0.02847 682 440 139 103
353 Please don't say anything. I lost a bet. 1.5058 0.02841 684 441 140 103
354 My other pairs are being used for a game right now. 1.5053 0.03016 655 437 105 113
355 Well you look like a cactus 1.5052 0.02737 675 420 169 86
356 They're from Auntie Em. 1.5052 0.02976 677 453 106 118
357 You knew I was a clotheshorse when we met. 1.5052 0.02652 679 418 181 80
358 I had a gift card from Bloomingdales. 1.5052 0.02864 679 440 135 104
359 These have more ankle support. 1.5052 0.02895 679 444 127 108
360 We’re on Zoom, no one will know. 1.5045 0.02766 672 424 158 90
361 Damnit, Bessy. It's not that kind of wild west." @mashal.hussai 1.5044 0.02845 678 441 134 103
362 Gee, I was just being hypothetical when I asked what you would do if you were in my wife's shoes. 1.5044 0.02815 680 435 147 98
363 I’m a talking horse and you’re concerned about the shoes? 1.5044 0.02963 567 351 146 70
364 You know, I do like the pink in the front better after all. 1.5041 0.04527 246 153 62 31
365 Don’t take this the wrong way, but there are times that a discouraging word does need to be heard. 1.5039 0.02768 649 402 167 80
366 Why yes, they are Italian...from my days in Spaghetti Westerns. 1.5038 0.02718 665 410 175 80
367 I want to live a little! 1.5037 0.02865 667 430 138 99
368 Seriously. QVC is on in the barn again? 1.5037 0.02981 667 445 108 114
369 My preferred pronoun is they. 1.5037 0.02771 669 420 161 88
370 Haha remember the Spring Summer 2020 collection? 1.5030 0.03078 660 454 81 125
371 These colors don’t run. 1.5030 0.02929 662 434 123 105
372 You said "horse" shoes? My bad. 1.5030 0.02983 662 448 98 116
373 Do these shoes go with this saddle? 1.5023 0.02889 653 421 136 96
374 Red is to go; green is to stop. 1.5023 0.03001 655 437 107 111
375 You know, they don’t have to match, they just have to *go.* 1.5023 0.02977 655 434 113 108
376 I don’t care how pretty they are, we don’t go out until Cuomo tells us we can. 1.5023 0.02899 657 426 132 99
377 What can I say? I’m a Carrie. 1.5023 0.03040 657 444 96 117
378 Rodeo?!! Have you seen my shoes? 1.5023 0.02756 661 427 142 92
379 I find your revulsion very anthropocentric. 1.5023 0.02957 663 439 115 109
380 A ten-gallon hat and not even an ounce of style. 1.5015 0.02906 648 419 133 96
381 No, your legs look great in pumps. 1.5015 0.03050 648 437 97 114
382 I know you can’t tell left from right, but this should help with front and back. 1.5015 0.02938 648 423 125 100
383 Him: Your shoes don’t match. Horse: Your hat is stupid. 1.5015 0.03081 648 441 89 118
384 Yes they are slip-ons Carl, obviously I can’t tie shoelaces 1.5015 0.02799 650 408 158 84
385 How dare you ask me that! What if I asked you about what your hat represents? 1.5015 0.02884 652 420 137 95
386 The same place you bought that stupid hat. 1.5015 0.02689 652 397 183 72
387 Quit complaining; they're Florsheims. 1.5008 0.03045 643 432 100 111
388 No wonder you're limping, you've got two lefts in front 1.5008 0.02997 643 426 112 105
389 Have you heard of Etsy? There’s literally EVERYTHING on there! 1.5008 0.03022 647 433 104 110
390 I could swear I told the farrier, "Gimme Shoes!" - not "Jimmy Choos." 1.5000 0.02795 646 405 159 82
391 These were the last two pairs they had with arch support. 1.5000 0.03001 642 426 111 105
392 Do you think it makes me look too short? 1.5000 0.03048 640 430 100 110
393 Says the fashion critic with the ten gallon hat. 1.5000 0.02672 640 386 188 66
394 Are you sure there’s nothing else you wanted to say...nothing else you noticed...? 1.4992 0.02985 635 418 117 100
395 But we belong together! I can change, you know. 1.4992 0.03155 633 437 76 120
396 No, I won't call you Tiny Dancer. 1.4992 0.02967 633 414 122 97
397 So you don’ need a dancing pardner any more? 1.4992 0.03099 631 428 91 112
398 Now, I want your honest opinion... 1.4984 0.02927 630 407 132 91
399 It wouldn't kill you to wear some color once and a while. 1.4984 0.02756 628 386 171 71
400 Come on out Betty and Tom; the party is over. 1.4984 0.03077 626 421 98 107
401 This is the first time we've been out since the lockdown, I wanted to dress up. 1.4984 0.02715 626 380 180 66
402 ‘Would you mind color coordinating my saddle?’ 1.4984 0.02649 626 403 146 77
403 OK ,OK I’ll stop making fun of your hat now. 1.4976 0.02951 621 402 129 90
404 It's a trans thing.... 1.4968 0.02999 622 409 117 96
405 Hey, I don’t make fun of your stupid hat. 1.4968 0.02706 620 395 150 75
406 In fairness, they said they'd try and match me with a Rhinestone Cowboy not The Beige Buckaroo 1.4968 0.03108 616 416 94 106
407 I'm living my truth, Dan. 1.4967 0.02840 614 384 155 75
408 Now you? I just had to breakup the peacocks for horsing around. 1.4960 0.03130 619 422 87 110
409 Sure, I’m willing to give it a go but I don’t think dressage means what you think it does. 1.4959 0.02944 613 395 132 86
410 You can’t expect me to be decisive in these uncertain times, Frank. 1.4959 0.03024 611 402 115 94
411 I told you to check your cart before you clicked "submit order." 1.4959 0.03024 611 402 115 94
412 I’m trying to double down on taking a walk in other people’s shoes 1.4951 0.03106 610 411 96 103
413 Just be glad I got loafers, Jim. 1.4942 0.03092 607 407 100 100
414 Everyone deserves a well-heeled ride. 1.4942 0.03047 605 400 111 94
415 Like I should take fashion tips from you? 1.4942 0.02808 601 371 163 67
416 Give me back my hat!! 1.4942 0.03143 601 407 91 103
417 I picked them up on Rodeo Drive. 1.4942 0.02788 601 369 167 65
418 Do you have a purse to match those shoes? 1.4942 0.03025 599 392 118 89
419 Let's wait until tonight. 1.4941 0.03142 597 403 93 101
420 See? This proves the New Yorker isn’t stingy with color ink. 1.4934 0.02853 602 377 153 72
421 For the last time: Green means “Go!” and red means “Whoa!” 1.4933 0.03121 600 404 96 100
422 Yes, those make your hooves look big. 1.4933 0.02838 598 372 157 69
423 I click the red shoes to go to Kansas, I click the blue shoes to go to Massachussetts. 1.4933 0.02869 596 381 139 76
424 Pay the blacksmith, partner. 1.4933 0.03128 596 401 96 99
425 What do you mean, you’d like to see something in a pump? 1.4924 0.03031 595 390 117 88
426 You don’t appreciate how much each of us want to express our unique style and the saddle just doesn’t do it. 1.4924 0.03204 595 409 79 107
427 You said it was time for new shoes. 1.4924 0.03094 591 393 105 93
428 Saddle shoes would have been too predictable. 1.4924 0.02809 589 362 164 63
429 What are you looking at? What about that hat?" 1.4924 0.03203 589 403 82 104
430 Jane, you ignorant slut. 1.4914 0.03315 580 407 61 112
431 Your daughter says she wants to be a farrier. 1.4905 0.03057 579 379 116 84
432 You won't be welcome in any of the states. 1.4905 0.03209 579 395 84 100
433 Horse shoes what’ll they think of next? 1.4905 0.03172 579 391 92 96
434 I waited on line 12 hours for these. I’m wearing them! 1.4905 0.03005 577 377 119 81
435 Rodeo Drive. Why? 1.4905 0.02893 577 361 149 67
436 Now Clementine, where is your mask? 1.4905 0.03246 577 397 77 103
437 ''...and the posse will be lookin' fer two men on foot, 'stead of one feller on a hoss. Y'see?'' 1.4897 0.02798 580 355 166 59
438 What're you lookin' at, Wilbur? 1.4896 0.03103 576 384 103 89
439 They all fit fine, but for some reason, every time I click the back ones it’s straight back to Kansas. 1.4896 0.02989 576 370 130 76
440 But I feel naked without them. 1.4895 0.03085 572 376 112 84
441 So I take it both of the Wicked Witches are dead? 1.4895 0.02917 572 372 125 75
442 Looks like you're ready for a shoe-down with some O.K.-Chanel's 1.4895 0.02909 570 377 115 78
443 There's a lot about me you don't know. 1.4894 0.02775 568 343 172 53
444 Whoa boy! Either Elvis or Dorothy Gale but not both on the same roundup. 1.4894 0.03162 568 380 98 90
445 It was an "old town road" music video audition 1.4894 0.03201 568 384 90 94
446 You should’ve gone with Velcro. 1.4891 0.03343 548 379 70 99
447 Hey, what’s with the stupid hat? 1.4891 0.03050 548 351 126 71
448 Okay Undecided, let’s go for a ride. 1.4891 0.03210 548 366 96 86
449 it works !! 1.4885 0.03291 567 393 71 103
450 I'm using this time to try walking a mile in someone else's shoes... and a peep​ toe is always in season 1.4885 0.03253 567 389 79 99
451 I don't think that sensible horse shoes bring the same amount of good luck. 1.4885 0.03253 567 389 79 99
452 They're gonna be uncomfortable until you break 'em in. 1.4875 0.03138 562 373 104 85
453 It's horse shoes and cowboy BOOTS. Who ever heard of cowboy shoes? 1.4875 0.03188 562 378 94 90
454 You never take me anywhere nice 1.4875 0.03168 562 376 98 88
455 My hindsight was never 20/20 1.4875 0.03106 560 380 92 88
456 I got dressed up to meet your outlaws. 1.4874 0.02897 556 345 151 60
457 I couldn't decide so I got both. 1.4874 0.02840 556 340 161 55
458 Sorry, Hank, but those stilettos were killing me. 1.4874 0.03049 556 359 123 74
459 Jeez, Frank. For once try not to be the neigh-sayer here. 1.4867 0.02919 563 356 141 66
460 I'm working my way up to pumps. 1.4865 0.03179 555 371 98 86
461 At first I thought the red, then maybe the blue. I don't know, what do you think? 1.4865 0.03259 555 379 82 94
462 It’s called fashion, sweetie. Look it up. 1.4865 0.03173 555 373 95 87
463 These are my dancing shoes, Slim ... 1.4864 0.03328 551 382 70 99
464 I think red says 'vicious outlaw' more than blue. 1.4864 0.03258 551 375 84 92
465 Well, you get to wear that silly hat! 1.4856 0.03274 554 380 79 95
466 thanks for letting me use your phone 1.4855 0.03303 550 379 75 96
467 They were a deal! His and her shoes. 1.4854 0.03292 548 376 78 94
468 The downstairs neighbors were complaining about the horseshoes. 1.4849 0.03251 530 355 93 82
469 These gender reveals keep getting weirder... 1.4846 0.03258 551 376 83 92
470 its my birthday; can i saddle you today? 1.4843 0.03367 543 379 65 99
471 That's "shod fine" not "schadenfreude". 1.4843 0.03099 543 368 93 82
472 Hey, at least I’m not trying to look like Pharrell at the 2014 Grammys. 1.4842 0.03387 539 377 63 99
473 If I have no name, how else am I supposed to express my individuality? 1.4842 0.03166 539 361 97 81
474 I'm taking a tap class with the Philly from stall #3. 1.4842 0.02898 539 355 116 68
475 Business in the front. Party in the back. 1.4836 0.03164 517 336 112 69
476 You do realize these are so out of season! 1.4834 0.03351 542 377 68 97
477 The Good, The Bad and The Uggs 1.4832 0.03223 536 359 95 82
478 I wanted a horse AND 4 mules not a horse IN 4 mules. 1.4831 0.03042 534 341 128 65
479 There was a sale at DSW, and I couldn't say neigh. 1.4831 0.03243 534 359 92 83
480 I am actually talking to you and you are just curious about my shoes? 1.4831 0.03053 534 342 126 66
481 Let me guess, Sancho gave you his 2 for 1 sales pitch and you bought it ?! 1.4831 0.03254 534 360 90 84
482 They didn’t have any in your size. I looked. 1.4831 0.03291 534 366 79 89
483 I didn’t laugh when you bought that hat. 1.4831 0.02896 532 329 150 53
484 Your hat looks ridiculous, Frank. 1.4831 0.02998 532 338 132 62
485 Clearly, I am all for supporting a new blacksmith. But I fear he is using me as his own personal canvas. 1.4824 0.03273 539 367 84 88
486 I wish I knew dogs were colorblind before asking Benji for fashion advice 1.4824 0.03176 539 358 102 79
487 Now let me get this straight—green for go and red for stop? 1.4823 0.03397 537 377 61 99
488 Now it's my turn to nail your shoes on. 1.4823 0.03186 537 357 101 79
489 You said it was a virtual prom. 1.4823 0.03240 537 364 88 85
490 Flats? With that saddle? 1.4822 0.03003 535 339 134 62
491 I couldn’t decide what color i liked best so i bought both. 1.4822 0.03323 533 366 77 90
492 I use the pronoun they. 1.4821 0.03019 531 337 132 62
493 The farrier is in quarantine so I got these online. Jeez, Clyde - it's the 21st century! 1.4821 0.03257 531 358 90 83
494 It only took one unusual ranch visit to start Dr. Seuss on a path of success. 1.4820 0.03363 527 364 72 91
495 Never mind the shoes. Where’s your mask, cowboy? 1.4810 0.03064 526 337 125 64
496 I said we were going to put some new horse shoes on you, not house shoes! 1.4810 0.03270 526 355 89 82
497 Well don't get all embarrassed now. 1.4809 0.03346 524 360 76 88
498 And all this time I didn't realize you were such a lady. 1.4809 0.03340 524 362 73 89
499 Yes we will be visiting blue and red states 1.4808 0.03323 522 356 81 85
500 Look, they only come in pairs - and besides, nobody’s going to be looking at your feet... 1.4808 0.03256 522 350 93 79
501 These are my dressage shoes. 1.4808 0.03009 522 329 135 58
502 Hmmmm.....horse shoes. 1.4808 0.03323 522 356 81 85
503 They asked me if I wanted to wait for a matching pair and I said neigh 1.4808 0.02923 522 337 125 60
504 I see we both reached new levels of unnecessary quarantine purchases. 1.4801 0.03012 527 334 133 60
505 I’ll loose the hat if you loose the shoes. 1.4799 0.03383 523 363 69 91
506 Well, excuse me for putting in the effort to look nice when we ride into town. 1.4799 0.03050 498 312 133 53
507 Did I mention that I signed up for an art class? 1.4798 0.03192 521 344 104 73
508 It’s not just the limited colorway - would you believe you don’t need to have these shoes nailed into your hooves? 1.4798 0.03304 519 352 85 82
509 Covfefe. 1.4798 0.03453 494 343 66 85
510 The blacksmith's is now part of a strip mall. 1.4797 0.03415 517 360 66 91
511 What if I don't want a 'giddy-up getup'. 1.4797 0.03415 517 360 66 91
512 The blacksmith's shop was closed, so I swung by the mall. 1.4796 0.02906 515 323 140 52
513 Well I never once complained about that silly hat! 1.4796 0.02989 515 322 139 54
514 Well YOU'RE the one who shared your Amazon password! 1.4795 0.03048 488 317 117 54
515 Hey there, cowboy, you can just refer to me using the pronoun “horse.” 1.4788 0.03045 518 347 101 70
516 They don't fit! 1.4787 0.03442 516 362 61 93
517 What? And only you get to enjoy arch support? 1.4787 0.03250 516 350 87 79
518 Don't you think the fact I'm talking to you is even more remarkable? 1.4787 0.03180 516 339 107 70
519 I’m feeling a little un-stable. 1.4787 0.03331 516 352 81 83
520 You get to wear your funny shoes and I get to wear mine 1.4783 0.03337 508 345 83 80
521 Is that a hat you you’re wearing, or are you just happy to see me? 1.4774 0.03498 465 317 74 74
522 The last pair felt like I was stepping on nails. 1.4773 0.03119 507 329 115 63
523 Oh. and that hat doesn't? 1.4773 0.03010 507 318 136 53
524 If John Paul II could pull it off, you should be fine. 1.4770 0.03289 501 335 93 73
525 You said this weekend was going to be dressage. 1.4770 0.02950 501 322 126 53
526 What do you mean, they're your lucky shoes? 1.4770 0.03432 501 347 69 85
527 AHEM! My eyes are up here, cowboy! 1.4770 0.03153 501 324 115 62
528 When you're gelded, you can go either way or both. 1.4759 0.02844 498 319 131 48
529 Which pair goes best with my eyes? 1.4759 0.03242 498 329 101 68
530 I'll lose the shoes if you do something about that hat. 1.4758 0.03052 496 320 119 57
531 They are going to think you are a city slicker. 1.4745 0.03384 491 337 76 78
532 I know I really don't NEED them, but they were on sale and besides, the shoes you gave me hurt my feet. Help me decide the color that best compliments my eyes! 1.4745 0.03534 491 347 55 89
533 Yeah, I agree. This ability to talk and haggle a 2 for 1 deal on designer footwear is a pretty sweet evolutionary advantage. 1.4739 0.03436 498 346 68 84
534 Get off your high horse, heels - er, high heels, horse 1.4737 0.03398 494 341 73 80
535 No, I think you look nice. 1.4735 0.03474 490 344 61 85
536 Big Sale? You look great? That's what you got?! 1.4734 0.03455 488 338 69 81
537 Well, clearly you shouldn’t have told me your password. 1.4734 0.03109 488 313 120 55
538 No, I will not get you matching socks! 1.4733 0.03392 486 331 80 75
539 What ? You know I am color blind!! 1.4733 0.03515 486 341 60 85
540 Now you can try walking a mile in my shoes. 1.4733 0.03118 486 310 122 54
541 Do you think I should have just gotten four purple ones? 1.4733 0.03367 486 329 84 73
542 Is it insensitive to have the pink shoes in the back? 1.4733 0.03284 486 325 93 68
543 I'm sorry to say we're both over the age limit for the rodeo 1.4733 0.03527 486 342 58 86
544 In these shoes? I don't think so 1.4733 0.03212 486 317 108 61
545 Well, your scarf doesn’t go with that hat, Mr. Fashion. 1.4733 0.03091 486 308 126 52
546 The saddle didn't give me much to work with. 1.4731 0.03390 484 329 81 74
547 I don't care if you are a female, you are still a horse! 1.4731 0.03628 465 329 52 84
548 You try finding 4 shoes to match this saddle. 1.4731 0.03243 465 303 105 57
549 You should talk... 1.4730 0.03451 482 332 72 78
550 No, I wouldn’t make you walk a mile in those shoes. 1.4730 0.03489 482 335 66 81
551 No, I think the pink ones look better in the front. 1.4730 0.03298 482 320 96 66
552 You're making a complete foal of yourself 1.4730 0.03501 482 336 64 82
553 You got home ealier Tom 1.4730 0.03482 482 337 63 82
554 Don’t worry, the Zoom conference can only see the top half. 1.4730 0.03082 482 309 120 53
555 You’re a shoe-in at the derby this year Peaky Sneakerz. 1.4730 0.03525 482 338 60 84
556 There's never a line in the unisex bathrooms, but I tell ya; my dogs are barking! 1.4723 0.03436 487 336 72 79
557 They have arch support. 1.4723 0.03423 487 335 74 78
558 My stall is the one with the trot through closet. R.Lehingrat Burnaby, BC 1.4723 0.03448 487 339 67 81
559 No, that’s not what I meant when I said we have to get horse shoes for you. 1.4722 0.03434 485 334 73 78
560 Hmmm...better arch support, but still clash with the saddle. 1.4720 0.03420 483 331 76 76
561 You overpaid for my new loafers, and the Avon Lady is here with lip gloss for Wilbur. 1.4719 0.03531 481 338 59 84
562 Are they done playing horseshoes yet? 1.4719 0.03114 481 306 123 52
563 Here’s the deal. Say nothing about the shoes, I say nothing about the hat. 1.4718 0.03093 426 261 130 35
564 Fifteen-gallon. What’s your story? 1.4718 0.03392 479 325 82 72
565 There’s a new blacksmith in town and I really like her. 1.4718 0.02891 479 306 127 46
566 We're going to a gender reveal party, correct? 1.4718 0.03220 479 314 105 60
567 Well I think your hat is lame. 1.4717 0.03297 477 316 97 64
568 I am not going to the rodeo without you. 1.4717 0.03591 477 339 51 87
569 Alright, these dang reveal parties are getting out of hand! 1.4717 0.03324 477 318 93 66
570 And that hat isn’t ridiculous? 1.4716 0.03171 475 305 116 54
571 Oh really? And you think that hat works? 1.4716 0.03226 475 309 108 58
572 Bamboo socks for the hot sand. 1.4716 0.03591 475 337 52 86
573 How about YOU nail a piece of metal to YOUR foot? 1.4716 0.03114 475 306 116 53
574 Sorry, but this is not "The Pony Express Yourself"! 1.4716 0.03274 475 315 97 63
575 If I wear these no one will notice your hat. 1.4705 0.03054 474 304 120 50
576 You were right. It's not easy being in your shoes. 1.4703 0.03171 472 303 116 53
577 Boss, I think the motto "Just Do It" does not apply here. 1.4703 0.03572 472 333 56 83
578 Whatever behooves you. 1.4702 0.03284 453 294 105 54
579 I'm sorry, but the blacksmith is closed due to lockdown orders. 1.4693 0.03463 473 326 72 75
580 Well, who is on their high horse now? 1.4692 0.03369 471 317 87 67
581 I’m color coordinated for the baby shower 1.4692 0.03527 471 329 63 79
582 I splurged. It was a BOGO sale 1.4692 0.03423 471 321 79 71
583 C’mon, Dusty, deep down you always knew. 1.4690 0.03064 467 292 131 44
584 No Jimmy Choo, the farrier says that is tired of changing your shoes. 1.4690 0.03652 467 335 45 87
585 I'm too old for bucking. It's time to try prancing. 1.4690 0.03445 467 319 77 71
586 It’s called being an influencer, Earl. #horseshooz 1.4690 0.03123 467 296 123 48
587 'The ones you put one had no arch support'. 1.4688 0.03403 465 314 84 67
588 "No, I'm not taking you to Macy' s One-Day Sale. 1.4687 0.03495 463 319 71 73
589 I’m too sexy for my hooves! 1.4687 0.03180 463 299 112 52
590 Also, I can talk. 1.4687 0.02998 463 292 128 43
591 The farrier is gay. 1.4687 0.03352 463 316 80 67
592 where'd my horse shoes go 1.4677 0.03290 464 313 88 63
593 I'm not thrilled about the new farrier either, but these do make my eyes pop. 1.4677 0.03476 464 319 73 72
594 Just one mile? 1.4677 0.03435 464 316 79 69
595 Tight doesn't matter. Have you ever had a nail driven into your foot? 1.4674 0.03318 460 304 97 59
596 The red and aqua are gun violence awareness colors. By the way, that thing better not be loaded. 1.4674 0.03239 460 316 80 64
597 I tested positive for steroids AND estrogen. 1.4672 0.03645 458 326 50 82
598 You're the first to know. I've decided to come out of the barn. 1.4672 0.03198 458 294 114 50
599 Look, just lead me to the water. I'll take it from there. 1.4672 0.03442 458 311 80 67
600 You went to Sarah Jessica Parker's store without your mask? 1.4672 0.03565 458 320 62 76
601 I’ll explain starboard and port one more time. 1.4671 0.03454 456 313 75 68
602 Well, my head is Democratic and my ass is Republican. 1.4658 0.03443 453 307 81 65
603 Nike or Adidas, who is offering us more to attend their rodeo? 1.4656 0.03426 451 304 84 63
604 Look it’s my money, I can spent it how I want. 1.4656 0.03622 451 318 56 77
605 Just my luck, they were all out of horseshoes again. 1.4656 0.03594 451 316 60 75
606 I love these shoes, but I couldn't justify two pairs exactly the same.... 1.4655 0.03607 449 315 59 75
607 The thought of being remembered as just ‘the horse with no name’ was keeping me up at night. 1.4655 0.03198 449 287 115 47
608 Well, I think your hat’s stupid. 1.4655 0.03229 449 289 111 49
609 They're a little loose. Do you know a good pink and blue smith? 1.4653 0.03634 447 315 56 76
610 Roy...you’ve been a great partner and the best of friends, but it’s time for me to hit the trail and live my truth. 1.4653 0.03224 447 287 112 48
611 The back ones get me to Kansas. The front ones to New York City. 1.4653 0.03536 447 308 70 69
612 I look ridiculous? Have you seen yourself in that hat? 1.4651 0.03132 430 267 126 37
613 Enough room in the hooves? 1.4641 0.03626 446 314 57 75
614 I think two of those are mine! 1.4640 0.03302 444 295 94 55
615 Gucci's! 1.4640 0.03680 444 316 50 78
616 Trust me, they'll never track us now. 1.4640 0.03317 444 291 100 53
617 Before I answer, let me ask, did you save the receipt.? 1.4640 0.03045 444 274 134 36
618 You've been watching My Little Pony again, haven't you!? 1.4638 0.03464 442 299 81 62
619 Just nail on new shoes," the vet says. "That'll get him going," he says... 1.4638 0.03508 442 302 75 65
620 It's not horsing around, John. It's fashion. 1.4636 0.03229 440 292 96 52
621 What do they mean, "and the horse you rode in on?" 1.4636 0.03693 440 313 50 77
622 What do you think? 1.4631 0.03563 447 311 65 71
623 I'm pretty sure 'walk a mile in my shoes' is just an idiom. 1.4630 0.03260 419 266 112 41
624 Which ones make me look like I have a winning personality? 1.4626 0.03470 441 299 80 62
625 The mare misunderstood when I said I like sex. 1.4626 0.03644 441 311 56 74
626 Same place you got that hat. 1.4624 0.03250 439 283 109 47
627 Whatever happened to the cowboy boots I gave you for your birthday? 1.4622 0.03180 437 287 102 48
628 Don't judge me Jack, it was a 75% off sale! 1.4619 0.03609 433 301 64 68
629 I'm hedging my bet on who's going to win in November. 1.4612 0.03635 438 308 58 72
630 The farrier insists these casual slip ons are trending, and I must say I do find quite comfortable, now giddy-up cowboy 1.4612 0.03503 438 299 76 63
631 Well pardon me, someone here needs style! 1.4610 0.03719 410 286 59 65
632 Blue for trotting. Red for galloping. 1.4606 0.03540 432 296 73 63
633 When I named you Dancer, I didn't mean it literally. 1.4606 0.03206 432 275 115 42
634 I opted for loafers. The laces on the oxfords were killers. 1.4606 0.03494 432 293 79 60
635 Avant-garde or just plain tacky? 1.4606 0.03329 432 290 88 54
636 I don’t care if they’re not sensible, I love them.” 1.4606 0.03337 432 283 99 50
637 What, I'm an Old Paint and you don't like my shoe colors? 1.4605 0.03760 430 309 44 77
638 Bring that hat of yours over here and let’s go! 1.4605 0.03553 430 300 64 66
639 The OK Corral was full but the Fabulous Corral was able to fit me in. 1.4605 0.03348 430 282 98 50
640 Gender reveal party, circa 1860 1.4603 0.03596 428 296 67 65
641 You're violating the Rules of Greyscale! 1.4603 0.03440 428 291 79 58
642 We are six feet apart. Your donkey and elephant friends are miles apart. 1.4594 0.03796 431 313 38 80
643 It’s my first rodeo. 1.4592 0.03466 429 289 83 57
644 This is the last time I ask for a set of balanced shoes. 1.4588 0.03780 425 306 43 76
645 Look, I’m not looking to get into another civil rights debate with you today... far be it for me to say what you can or cannot wear to work. 1.4588 0.03751 425 304 47 74
646 You know, I can see your no-show socks. 1.4588 0.03294 425 285 89 51
647 Let me guess, first rodeo? 1.4586 0.02870 423 290 88 45
648 Okay. Now it’s my turn to walk a day in your shoes. 1.4586 0.03167 423 266 120 37
649 Read the invitation - dress code is black tie 1.4586 0.03750 423 302 48 73
650 I had to make do. The ferriers were all shut down by Covid-19. 1.4584 0.03626 421 292 65 64
651 You're not color blind? 1.4584 0.03749 421 300 49 72
652 The blue ones are more fashion-forward, but the red ones make my hooves look smaller. 1.4584 0.03078 421 267 118 36
653 Imagine it: "A man rode into town on a horse on limited edition colorways." 1.4584 0.03611 421 291 67 63
654 But Lightening- all the horses in New York are wearing them, a matching 4 is SO 2019 . 1.4584 0.03809 421 304 41 76
655 Cute shoes. 1.4580 0.03653 417 290 63 64
656 Well, don’t you look hot to trot today! 1.4580 0.03340 417 271 101 45
657 Kids just don’t find cowboys cool anymore. 1.4580 0.03685 417 292 59 66
658 I’m sorry, I don’t know what Tic Tock is! 1.4580 0.03777 417 298 47 72
659 My forelegs want to go but my hind legs won't move. 1.4580 0.03808 417 300 43 74
660 Hats are so last season. 1.4580 0.03762 417 297 49 71
661 I'm a bipartisan stalking horse--stealthier that way. 1.4580 0.03669 417 291 61 65
662 They looked better online. 1.4580 0.03305 417 269 105 43
663 I'm a stable genius... 1.4575 0.03366 424 279 96 49
664 I’ll take you as far as the neighbor’s ranch. I’m still breaking these in. 1.4573 0.03259 422 271 109 42
665 Too much? 1.4569 0.03351 418 273 99 46
666 I think I'll keep the red ones. They're a little tight but make my ankles look thinner. 1.4567 0.03222 416 264 114 38
667 I swear! I found these in Seabiscuit's closet! 1.4565 0.03783 414 296 47 71
668 When do you want to do the reveal? 1.4565 0.03609 414 285 69 60
669 I couldn't decide between blue suede shoes or ruby slippers so I bought a pair of each! 1.4563 0.03671 412 287 62 63
670 Two for one on Amazon Cute, huh? 1.4563 0.03782 412 294 48 70
671 It’s called fashion, mister 1.4561 0.03749 410 290 53 67
672 Okay, you take off that stupid hat and i'll take off the silly shoes, then you can go for a ride 1.4561 0.03519 410 276 81 53
673 That's the last time I hire a farrier from L.A. 1.4561 0.03685 410 286 61 63
674 The farrier is on vacation so his wife fitted me with these new horseshoes. 1.4561 0.03733 410 289 55 66
675 Where should we go for dinner? 1.4561 0.03765 410 291 51 68
676 Let’s face it, we both bought things online we didn’t need during this quarantine 1.4557 0.03291 384 241 111 32
677 Sorry. I didn't get my hooves done this week! 1.4556 0.03252 417 267 110 40
678 That hat always struck me as tacky, but did I complain? 1.4545 0.03174 418 264 118 36
679 A good ride? Man, I have a shoe deal. 1.4545 0.03850 407 294 41 72
680 You said get ready for the stage, and I just thought... 1.4545 0.03272 407 260 109 38
681 „My eyes are up here, Bob.“ 1.4545 0.03244 407 266 100 41
682 ohh..It's been months these shoes are not working dude ! 1.4545 0.03897 407 297 35 75
683 If you're gonna wear that hat I'm gonna wear these shoes." 1.4543 0.03586 405 276 74 55
684 These are so last year. 1.4543 0.03769 405 287 52 66
685 Weird? At least they're comfortable. How about we nail your boots to your feet for a day and see how you like it, Robert. 1.4543 0.03575 383 255 82 46
686 They're for Gay Ride week. 1.4541 0.03295 403 258 107 38
687 Yes, I have mixed color shoes on, but you have a baguette stuffed under your hat. 1.4541 0.03667 403 279 65 59
688 Just for here. On the trail, you can go back to the Birkenstocks. 1.4541 0.03406 403 260 98 43
689 Sex and the City goes West. 1.4541 0.03667 403 279 65 59
690 This is your last prank, Harold, because I'm going to kill you. 1.4534 0.03842 408 295 41 72
691 The polls suggested that the democrats are in front! 1.4530 0.03539 362 235 90 37
692 Line up ... boys in front, girls in back! 1.4530 0.03759 404 286 53 65
693 If you'd said "red right returning" in the first place I would have gotten them on the right hoofs. 1.4530 0.03497 404 283 64 57
694 Why don't you just register as an Independent? 1.4530 0.03693 404 282 61 61
695 Between your hat and my shoes I think we'll make it into next month's Vogue. 1.4530 0.03523 404 272 81 51
696 I will not be ridden rough-shod. 1.4530 0.03326 404 261 103 40
697 The returns are free, but who’s got the time? 1.4530 0.03808 404 289 47 68
698 Theses are as much horse shoes as your hat is ten gallons. 1.4525 0.03585 400 272 75 53
699 You wouldn’t believe how hard it is to find these shoes in a size 28 1.4525 0.03550 400 270 79 51
700 Looks weird now, but imagine me in two pairs of trousers. 1.4520 0.03523 396 265 83 48
701 Is this a cognitive test? 1.4520 0.03559 396 267 79 50
702 If you can put on pants to out today, then I am putting on my nice shoes. 1.4520 0.03950 396 290 33 73
703 I'm afraid it'll have to do; turns out the blacksmith's not an essential service. 1.4519 0.03942 270 171 76 23
704 Well I’m not changing them now. Do you know how long it took me to tie the laces? 1.4518 0.03415 394 260 91 43
705 Dude! 1.4518 0.03842 394 284 43 67
706 No, we cannot go dancing! 1.4518 0.03545 394 272 69 53
707 Or do you like the red ones in the front? 1.4518 0.03348 394 254 102 38
708 I've got my mask around my neck, thank you. So where's YOURS? 1.4518 0.03766 394 277 56 61
709 I aint ridden no dang horsie whose shoes don't match! 1.4514 0.03814 401 287 47 67
710 I will if you give up that hat! 1.4514 0.02693 401 265 106 30
711 I want to add spurs that jingle, jangle, jingle, as I go ridin’ merrily along. 1.4511 0.03652 399 278 63 58
712 You’ve been in my closet again. 1.4509 0.03405 397 260 95 42
713 Not a match, but close counts in horseshoes. 1.4509 0.03368 397 258 99 40
714 Relax Earl, no one can see your shoes in a video conference... 1.4509 0.03424 397 261 93 43
715 "The blacksmith had a sale" 1.4509 0.02329 397 279 86 32
716 You have a beautiful heart, Larry, and I think it’s time to stop hiding it behind that hat, which actually makes you look shorter than you are! 1.4509 0.03760 397 280 55 62
717 If you won't wear a mask, I'm taking off my shoes and leaving without you! 1.4506 0.03671 395 273 66 56
718 Says who? 1.4506 0.03826 395 282 48 65
719 I thought this would make our ride more fluid. 1.4506 0.03636 395 286 46 63
720 If you can wear that ridiculous hat 1.4501 0.03822 391 278 50 63
721 What’s with the shoes? 1.4499 0.03940 389 283 37 69
722 I ain't ridin' no horse who can't find 4 shoes that match. 1.4499 0.03578 389 265 74 50
723 The experts say this is the best method to prevent catching hoof-and-mouth disease. 1.4496 0.03922 387 280 40 67
724 That new blacksmith is reading too many fashion magazines! 1.4496 0.03870 387 277 46 64
725 Was your rider a California liberal? 1.4490 0.03865 392 282 44 66
726 What pronouns do you prefer, pardner? 1.4490 0.03675 392 271 66 55
727 Well I just couldn’t make up my mind... 1.4490 0.03359 392 264 84 44
728 You don't know the rules for horseshoes? 1.4490 0.03763 392 276 56 60
729 It could have been worse - my high heels. 1.4490 0.03780 392 277 54 61
730 Listen, your thing the open range. My thing is arch support. So I don’t want to hear about it. 1.4490 0.03530 392 268 74 50
731 Listen they have great arch support. 1.4490 0.03301 392 251 106 35
732 For every pair we buy, they send another one to less fortunate horses. 1.4490 0.03474 392 260 88 44
733 If I tap all four of these together maybe we can skip to 2021 1.4490 0.03455 392 259 90 43
734 It's within union regulations. 1.4487 0.03931 390 284 37 69
735 Your hat clashes with my shoes. 1.4487 0.03497 390 272 66 52
736 Stop horsing around & put your good shoes on. 1.4487 0.03795 390 276 53 61
737 I know, but human shoe stores have a better selection than my blacksmith! 1.4487 0.03829 390 278 49 63
738 Sure, right. Yes, I ordered them on Equine/gender reveal.com 1.4487 0.03948 390 285 35 70
739 Yeah, I got tired of the whole "nail a spike through my hoof" thing. 1.4487 0.03391 390 259 89 42
740 It’s the whole ‘two kids pretending to be a horse’ look, it’s very in this season 1.4487 0.03812 390 277 51 62
741 the farrier has the new Spring collection, the Funfetti line. 1.4487 0.03864 390 280 45 65
742 These days, I just dress up for fun 1.4487 0.03725 390 272 61 57
743 Look, about last night... 1.4487 0.03525 390 261 83 46
744 When I gallop, they look purple. 1.4485 0.03384 388 252 98 38
745 All Gary wanted was a horse of many colors ... 1.4482 0.03772 386 271 57 58
746 Why yes, we will be observing the recommended "wide open spaces rules". 1.4482 0.03808 386 273 53 60
747 It's not you. It's me. 1.4479 0.03632 384 264 69 51
748 And now you've been visiting the McCoys. 1.4479 0.03963 384 280 36 68
749 They're from Macy's Cowboy Spring collection. 1.4479 0.03841 384 273 50 61
750 My usual clip, combined with a vivid new clop.” 1.4479 0.03603 384 260 76 48
751 My old owner gave me acid and I've been legit tripping ever since dawg 1.4479 0.03894 384 276 44 64
752 Gucci, and you fly the farrier in from Florence every month. 1.4476 0.03927 382 276 41 65
753 I don't think we're in Texas anymore, Toto. But, Ireland? 1.4476 0.03945 382 277 39 66
754 He thought I asked for whores' shoes. 1.4476 0.03748 382 266 61 55
755 Whoa! Are you gonna wear those in to town? 1.4476 0.03766 382 267 59 56
756 Nancy Sinatra gave them to me. 1.4476 0.03821 382 270 53 59
757 I just couldn't make a decision. 1.4476 0.03945 382 277 39 66
758 Why couldn’t you just get two pairs of the same color, John? 1.4476 0.03856 382 272 49 61
759 They're comfy. Did I mock your penis-shaped hat? 1.4474 0.03651 380 259 72 49
760 A horse with no shame. 1.4474 0.03455 380 249 92 39
761 you know what they say, “if the shoe fits”....... 1.4471 0.03703 378 260 67 51
762 Are you going to wear that hat? 1.4471 0.03815 378 266 55 57
763 You define happy trails your way, I'll define it my way. 1.4470 0.03249 387 245 111 31
764 Do I force you to wear human shoes, Lenny? 1.4470 0.03852 387 277 47 63
765 Don't get me wrong - I like 'em, but... they don't really go with the brown leather outfit I normally wear. 1.4470 0.03817 387 275 51 61
766 I prefer hay/hem pronouns. 1.4468 0.03868 385 276 46 63
767 Do you think the pink ones make my hind quarters look big? 1.4468 0.03725 385 268 62 55
768 You try finding a blacksmith now-a-days 1.4465 0.03758 383 268 59 56
769 Would YOU go out in unmatched shoes? 1.4465 0.03812 383 271 53 59
770 I'm having twins?! 1.4465 0.03901 383 276 43 64
771 They're saddle shoes. 1.4465 0.03494 383 254 87 42
772 I said horseshoes not Jimmy Choos ! 1.4465 0.03494 383 254 87 42
773 The yellow slides looked better. 1.4465 0.03953 383 279 37 67
774 Who said that we are going to town? 1.4462 0.02072 381 266 92 23
775 My other shoes felt like I was walking on nails. 1.4462 0.03681 381 262 68 51
776 This should double the chances of finding a matching designer saddle bag. 1.4459 0.03421 379 247 95 37
777 I'm expressing my true self. 1.4459 0.03561 379 259 73 47
778 Yeah, I can just slip them on. 1.4456 0.03767 377 263 60 54
779 I was expecting saddle shoes. 1.4456 0.03413 377 245 96 36
780 Don't judge, you're the one who shot them. I just took their shoes. 1.4453 0.03384 375 242 99 34
781 What makes you think this is my first rodeo? 1.4453 0.03589 375 252 79 44
782 I don't know. Did you change your hair? 1.4453 0.03579 375 254 76 45
783 I still prefer the Crocs! 1.4450 0.03891 373 266 48 59
784 If your gonna wear that hat, then I'm wearin' these shoes..." 1.4450 0.03522 373 247 86 40
785 They both spark joy. 1.4447 0.03452 371 242 93 36
786 Where is the cow? 1.4447 0.04036 371 272 33 66
787 Hold the snickering. They were on sale! 1.4447 0.03687 371 256 66 49
788 You're right Milly. The blue ones do go better with your coat. 1.4447 0.03813 371 260 57 54
789 So this is how you shoe a horse Tex? 1.4447 0.04000 371 270 37 64
790 Shoot! Now my hat doesn't match. 1.4447 0.03851 371 262 53 56
791 Sure, the Color Consultant was great, but where was the Blacksmith? 1.4447 0.03799 380 268 55 57
792 I shod the sheriff's but I did not shoe the deputy's. 1.4444 0.03336 369 235 104 30
793 What? Your try shopping for shoes! 1.4444 0.03976 378 276 36 66
794 Sam the shoe man has gone to far this time 1.4444 0.03959 378 275 38 65
795 You’re really gonna judge the shoes while wearing that hat? 1.4444 0.03652 369 250 74 45
796 It’s my interpretation of business in the front, party in the back. 1.4444 0.03851 378 269 50 59
797 If you want a ride, I'll have to change into my trainers. 1.4444 0.03606 378 261 68 49
798 What? It's #SelfCareSunday. 1.4444 0.03941 378 274 40 64
799 I upgraded to front wheel drive and rear brakes. 1.4444 0.04017 369 269 36 64
800 Yes Silver. Today the Lone Ranger is exercising his right not to wear a mask. 1.4444 0.04012 378 278 32 68
801 I asked for "speakers" 1.4444 0.03777 378 270 50 58
802 They didn’t have anything in a kitten heel? 1.4444 0.03867 369 261 52 56
803 When you hear heels, think of horses. 1.4444 0.04017 369 269 36 64
804 This is my first rodeo. 1.4439 0.03555 374 250 82 42
805 Embarrassing? Says the man with the penis hat? 1.4439 0.03555 374 253 79 42
806 You seemed kind of down 1.4439 0.03883 374 267 48 59
807 The store was practically empty, I wore a mask and we socially distanced. 1.4435 0.03843 372 263 53 56
808 At least they’re not mules. 1.4435 0.03508 372 246 87 39
809 This being Wyoming, I'd put the red ones in front. 1.4435 0.03528 372 247 85 40
810 I am King and I am Queen; I am self-sufficient. 1.4435 0.03579 372 262 60 50
811 I know, you don't trust anyone who doesn't wear socks. 1.4432 0.03934 370 266 44 60
812 Too matchy matchy? 1.4432 0.03542 370 246 84 40
813 Just how am I to match your saddle with your shoes? 1.4432 0.03934 370 266 44 60
814 My farrier is into fashion. 1.4432 0.03897 370 264 48 58
815 The farrier said he was making an artistic statement. 1.4432 0.03897 370 264 48 58
816 Wait, gelding means what?! 1.4432 0.03542 370 246 84 40
817 Er ... I dunno ... Did you get your mane cut? 1.4432 0.03664 370 252 72 46
818 What’s next? Pigs wearing wigs?! 1.4432 0.03971 370 268 40 62
819 Umm laces.....your laces are untied. 1.4429 0.03913 368 263 47 58
820 But they didn’t have two pair of the blue in my size” 1.4429 0.03837 368 259 55 54
821 Thought we needed some color around here. 1.4426 0.03891 366 260 50 56
822 Life's too short to wear matching shoes, John. 1.4426 0.03365 366 241 91 34
823 Mario didn’t believe that my regular shoes provide a better rider experience. 1.4423 0.04078 364 268 31 65
824 I've also gone a different direction with the nails. 1.4423 0.03389 364 234 99 31
825 I've decided that I'd rather take tap dancing lessons... 1.4423 0.03908 364 259 49 56
826 And I thought I was color blind... 1.4423 0.03879 364 260 48 56
827 You had something else in mind??” 1.4423 0.03985 364 263 41 60
828 I like to ride high in the saddle. 1.4420 0.03944 371 268 42 61
829 I don’t mind the loafers, Nelly. It’s the moonwalking that’s making me mad 1.4420 0.03555 371 258 66 47
830 And when I gallop quickly they look purple. 1.4420 0.03662 362 245 74 43
831 What... you said I could borrow them. 1.4420 0.03380 362 232 100 30
832 You change the hat, I’ll change the shoes! 1.4420 0.03765 362 250 64 48
833 Dammit Fred, how much is this going to cost me at the blacksmith?" 1.4420 0.04021 362 263 38 61
834 Maybe you got spurs that jingle all the way? 1.4420 0.03856 362 262 43 57
835 Do these shoes make my saddle look big? 1.4420 0.03491 362 237 90 35
836 Well Mr. Fancypants. I see we’re feeling very binary today. 1.4420 0.04021 362 263 38 61
837 Happy trails? 1.4420 0.03944 362 259 46 57
838 To be honest I'm surprised they had any in your size. 1.4417 0.03400 369 239 97 33
839 Be honest, do they make my legs look spindly? 1.4417 0.03494 360 238 86 36
840 My eyes are up here. 1.4417 0.03289 360 234 96 30
841 Things just ain't the same since Warhol's been sheriff. 1.4417 0.03981 360 259 43 58
842 He must be the new front-wheel drive breed. 1.4414 0.04088 367 272 28 67
843 How many times...front has to match the back! 1.4414 0.03921 367 263 46 58
844 I find your choice of a hat very distracting. 1.4411 0.03781 365 254 61 50
845 Are you backing up or going forward? 1.4411 0.03937 365 262 45 58
846 Either way, who y'all step out with ain't none of my business. 1.4411 0.03976 365 264 41 60
847 At least I went with the flats. 1.4408 0.03102 363 240 94 29
848 I see we have a new blacksmith in town. ” 1.4408 0.03484 363 238 90 35
849 They said the matching saddle is out of stock. 1.4408 0.03817 363 254 58 51
850 I bought the last pair in green. 1.4408 0.04021 363 267 33 63
851 Technically, these are flatlands. 1.4408 0.03954 363 261 44 58
852 you're not Silver......and you're not the Lone Ranger 1.4404 0.03813 361 252 59 50
853 Decent to treat myself to a mani pedi. 1.4404 0.03752 361 259 49 53
854 I hope this will once and for all teach you to stop betting on sports. 1.4404 0.04105 361 267 29 65
855 The invitation did say “business casual”. 1.4404 0.03408 361 243 81 37
856 Well, they're an improvement over the stillettos. 1.4401 0.03353 359 229 102 28
857 The blacksmith was closed but there was a two-for-one at Prada. 1.4401 0.03555 359 238 84 37
858 they didn’t have anything in steel or aluminum. This is the new style and I like it. 1.4401 0.03809 359 250 60 49
859 I was running late this morning. 1.4398 0.03614 357 244 71 42
860 Better keep them clean. They go back to my wife before dinner. 1.4398 0.03548 357 236 85 36
861 I lost at a winner take all game of horseshoes 1.4394 0.03944 355 253 48 54
862 If you don't talk about my hat, I won't talk about your shoes. 1.4394 0.03736 355 243 68 44
863 Love the shoes, but do you like my new 37.8541 litre hat? 1.4394 0.04024 355 257 40 58
864 Do I look fast in these? 1.4394 0.03628 355 238 78 39
865 I prefer tap to clip-clop. 1.4394 0.03331 355 225 104 26
866 I was just singing, Give me the old soft shoe" and this is what happened. 1.4394 0.04004 355 256 42 57
867 Do you think this identifies me as simply “horse.?” 1.4394 0.04004 355 256 42 57
868 Don’t worry, they’re vegan. 1.4394 0.03683 355 243 69 43
869 Yea, it's a horse costume. What gave it away? 1.4391 0.02630 353 244 83 26
870 It’s one step forward with your blue shoes, two steps back with your red shoes, then we do-si-do. 1.4391 0.03981 353 253 45 55
871 I thought my wife wearing horse shoes was just a fashion statement 1.4389 0.04094 360 266 30 64
872 Neigh or Yay? 1.4389 0.03448 360 242 81 37
873 These pairs for walking n these uhhh girl gotta have some fun Yu know 1.4389 0.04075 360 265 32 63
874 Liberace! Have you been scratching in my closet again? 1.4389 0.03999 360 263 37 60
875 They’re perfect for dressage 1.4388 0.03213 335 227 78 30
876 I'm a show horse, not a work horse. 1.4387 0.03476 351 228 92 31
877 Yea, I'll go both ways. 1.4382 0.03994 356 257 42 57
878 Yes, horses are colorblind. Why do you ask? 1.4382 0.03598 356 238 80 38
879 You did not mention which pair, so I am fetching you both. 1.4379 0.04052 354 258 37 59
880 Since when do I care what you think?! I feel pretty. 1.4371 0.03411 350 225 97 28
881 I almost caught a rainbow, did you see? 1.4371 0.04048 350 254 39 57
882 They didn't come in pairs of four 1.4368 0.03942 348 247 50 51
883 close doesn't cut it for horseshoes in this case. 1.4368 0.04086 348 254 36 58
884 Yes it is. Is that what YOU are wearing 1.4368 0.03496 348 227 90 31
885 they just don't do it for you, just saying 1.4368 0.04004 348 250 44 54
886 They' re more comfortable and your wife never wears them anymore. 1.4368 0.03636 348 233 78 37
887 Well, I guess I'll be riding on a horse with no shame. 1.4368 0.03567 348 230 84 34
888 I suppose this field could use some diversity. 1.4368 0.04004 348 250 44 54
889 I just LOVE that hat, Jerry. 1.4368 0.03692 348 238 69 41
890 You can lead a man to a Zara but you can’t make him fashion, I guess. 1.4368 0.04146 348 257 30 61
891 And then she said, "Don't think you can just waltz in here and track your day's dirt over my clean floors!" So, what do you think of these? 1.4364 0.03980 346 252 39 55
892 I'm going for business in the front party in the back. 1.4364 0.03639 346 239 66 41
893 I'm starting a new fad for the horsey set. 1.4364 0.04063 346 251 39 56
894 If you want to continue to rough ride me, I’m going to the square dance. 1.4364 0.04125 346 254 33 59
895 They call it the mullet look: Work shoes in the front, party shoes in the back. 1.4364 0.04022 346 249 43 54
896 Which goes best with sagebrush and glorious sunsets? 1.4364 0.03037 346 234 86 26
897 These are definitely the four horseshoes of the apocalypse 1.4364 0.03581 346 229 83 34
898 I'm sorry Elmer, but I can't be seen with you wearing that outfit. 1.4364 0.04125 346 254 33 59
899 They were all that were left in the yearling aisle. 1.4364 0.04001 346 248 45 53
900 When I said “get ready to dance” I didn’t mean this 1.4364 0.04043 346 250 41 55
901 My mother always used to tell me, if the shoe fits... 1.4360 0.03735 344 234 70 40
902 Pink and turquoise shoes! Do you think the the other cowboys will notice we are not color coordinated 1.4360 0.04061 344 249 40 55
903 Oh, yeah? Well, your hat looks stupid. 1.4360 0.02801 344 233 87 24
904 With a hat like that and you’re complaining my socks don’t match? 1.4360 0.04164 344 254 30 60
905 Lillybelle misinterprets Slim’s plea, “Horseshoes anyone?” 1.4360 0.04144 344 253 32 59
906 When I said let’s sashay into town, I didn’t mean it literally!” -Will Hunter, Plymouth M 1.4360 0.04082 344 250 38 56
907 I never question your hat. 1.4360 0.03377 344 219 100 25
908 Sorry I don't date tap dancers on principle. It is NOT because you are a horse. I love horses. Just not tap dancers. I'm sorry 1.4360 0.04082 344 250 38 56
909 I killed your wife and son for their shoes, and I'll kill you if you don't hand over that hat. 1.4360 0.04205 344 256 26 62
910 Do they come in orange? I need to put some color in my life. 1.4360 0.04040 344 248 42 54
911 Do I look foalish in these? But they're for the gender reveal party! 1.4360 0.04061 344 249 40 55
912 Imported from Italy. Why do you ask? 1.4357 0.03599 342 229 78 35
913 You hammer shoes onto your feet before you critisize me. 1.4357 0.03587 342 226 83 33
914 I'm starting to realize why that farrier was so cheap. 1.4357 0.04016 342 245 45 52
915 I'm the one who gets to play the tenderfoot, not you. 1.4357 0.04079 342 248 39 55
916 what do you mean they don’t publish colored cartoons in the New Yorker? 1.4355 0.03559 349 236 76 37
917 You're not a shoe hound, you're a horse! 1.4348 0.03726 345 240 62 43
918 It's not that kind of rodeo. 1.4348 0.03493 345 230 82 33
919 Same place you bought that silly hat. 1.4344 0.03408 343 220 97 26
920 Stop looking at me like that. I ride YOU, remember that... 1.4344 0.04006 343 246 45 52
921 Well I think these ones are luckier, Clyde. 1.4344 0.03696 343 234 70 39
922 It was dark when I left the barn this morning. 1.4340 0.03570 341 225 84 32
923 Nice hat, but you’re still short! 1.4340 0.03758 341 233 68 40
924 No, I don’t mind. They look better on you anyway. 1.4340 0.03558 341 227 81 33
925 Let me guess ... You visited my ex and she send my shoes with you 1.4340 0.04151 341 251 32 58
926 I’m figuring this way we’re covered for rodeos in both Texas and California 1.4336 0.03621 339 228 76 35
927 You can take the old ones and make a game out of them. 1.4336 0.03751 339 231 69 39
928 So shoe me. 1.4336 0.03705 339 229 73 37
929 Well, I’m colourblind, what’s your excuse? 1.4336 0.04086 339 246 39 54
930 There’s a part of me that wants to vote Republican... 1.4336 0.03693 339 241 54 44
931 If I were you, wearing that hat, I’d just keep my mouth shut. 1.4336 0.03372 339 229 80 30
932 It's 2020, and you think THIS is odd?! 1.4336 0.03511 339 221 89 29
933 Now how am I supposed to find saddlebags that match? 1.4336 0.03423 339 228 83 28
934 It’s August Shelly, how can you still be undecided? 1.4336 0.03900 339 240 52 47
935 Did you get dressed in the dark? 1.4332 0.04017 337 241 46 50
936 I told you I'm not the matchy-matchy type! 1.4332 0.03744 337 234 62 41
937 You said dress for the job you want, and I'm ready to stud. 1.4332 0.03697 337 227 74 36
938 I'm transitioning to a show horse. 1.4332 0.03398 337 215 98 24
939 OK, I walked a mile in yours. You get the saddle and I’ll fetch the blacksmith. 1.4332 0.03744 337 229 70 38
940 What are you looking at? All the foals are wearing them these days.. 1.4332 0.04115 337 248 33 56
941 When I gallop, they make purple! 1.4332 0.03756 337 232 65 40
942 Probably shouldn't have fired the blacksmith, huh? 1.4332 0.03279 337 226 86 25
943 I’m the one who’s supposed to dance 1.4332 0.04115 337 248 33 56
944 Dressed up! Now let's put up a good show to get you some social media validation. 1.4332 0.04104 337 245 38 54
945 But they’re BOGO! 1.4332 0.04039 337 242 44 51
946 I see it in your face, Ted - you prefer the mules? 1.4328 0.03689 335 225 75 35
947 Your shoes are on the wrong feet 1.4328 0.03901 335 234 57 44
948 That hat looks ridiculous. 1.4328 0.03689 335 225 75 35
949 Yeah, well it sure beats having the village smithy pound nails into your feet. 1.4328 0.03565 335 220 85 30
950 Your hat needed a color fix! 1.4328 0.03957 335 244 40 51
951 ״now just on the reds” 1.4328 0.04209 335 248 29 58
952 What? I'm not on quarantine. Don't wait up. 1.4328 0.03901 335 234 57 44
953 Are you really going to wear that hat? 1.4324 0.03439 333 216 91 26
954 It was buy one, get one free 1.4324 0.03504 333 216 90 27
955 My doctor said that if I didn’t change shoes now, I’d have problems with my arches later in life 1.4324 0.03606 333 220 82 31
956 Your Mother and I had a suspicion 1.4324 0.03813 333 231 61 41
957 Carrie Bradshaw shoe-ed me. Why do you ask? 1.4324 0.04032 333 238 46 49
958 Now THESE are horseshoes 1.4324 0.03606 333 220 82 31
959 It has nothing to do with politics! I just like the colors. 1.4324 0.03941 333 234 54 45
960 I am surprised you didn't go with the saddle shoes. 1.4324 0.03503 340 222 89 29
961 They looked different online. 1.4324 0.03528 340 223 87 30
962 Oh, but the saddle "looks natural"? 1.4320 0.03747 338 233 65 40
963 They're tap shoes - why do you ask? 1.4320 0.03963 338 240 50 48
964 The shoes I get-but the English saddle? 1.4315 0.03607 336 223 81 32
965 Well I don’t see why these can’t be lucky. 1.4315 0.03752 336 229 69 38
966 It’s not called dressage for nothing. 1.4311 0.03572 334 220 84 30
967 Okay, I spent the day in them. I'm still not convinced. 1.4311 0.02827 334 229 81 24
968 They said these behoove me. 1.4309 0.03765 304 201 75 28
969 Hey, I told you to get that light fixed in the barn 1.4307 0.03972 332 235 51 46
970 And you had the audacity to make fun of my hat? 1.4307 0.03785 332 227 67 38
971 I discovered I'm a "Carrie" who prefers the Big Apple to the open range. 1.4307 0.04063 332 239 43 50
972 If you're going to wear that hat, I'm going to wear these shoes. 1.4307 0.03687 332 223 75 34
973 I was trying to go for business in the front, party in the back. 1.4307 0.04173 332 244 33 55
974 Too preppy? 1.4303 0.03801 330 226 66 38
975 They draw attention away from the fact that I can talk. 1.4303 0.03653 330 220 78 32
976 Do they make my butt look big? 1.4303 0.02482 330 229 81 20
977 Love these colors on me, but I'm looking for something with more of a 'U' shape. 1.4303 0.04104 330 239 40 51
978 Turns out I need orthodics. 1.4303 0.03628 330 219 80 31
979 Yes, very patriotic. 1.4303 0.04149 330 241 36 53
980 I've decided to let you on my Secret Ariats 1.4303 0.04093 330 246 29 55
981 I was gonna get two blue pair, but they were out, and I just can't resist a BOGO! 1.4303 0.04014 330 235 48 47
982 I would’ve bought you a pair, but you treat me like an animal. 1.4303 0.03921 330 233 53 44
983 Am I overdressed? It's my first rodeo. 1.4299 0.03592 328 216 83 29
984 I'm not stubborn, I just can't run in these heels. 1.4299 0.03579 328 218 80 30
985 I don’t care that they’re suede. To the Ponderosa, and step on it. 1.4299 0.03794 328 229 59 40
986 Around the ranch, okay. Never in town. 1.4299 0.03405 328 209 97 22
987 Welcome to Texas dude. 1.4299 0.03939 328 230 55 43
988 Do they make me look like an ass? 1.4299 0.03867 328 227 61 40
989 Sorry, first time I’ve tried to shoe a horse. 1.4299 0.03618 328 217 81 30
990 You must have been in a hurry. 1.4299 0.04235 328 243 29 56
991 You know you’re color-blind, right? 1.4299 0.03013 328 228 75 25
992 You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot teach it port vs. starboard. 1.4299 0.04229 335 250 26 59
993 I like them, so just get off my back about my color choices. 1.4294 0.03909 326 232 50 44
994 I have Zoom Tango in 15 minutes... 1.4290 0.03675 324 216 77 31
995 Why, saddleshoes, naturally. 1.4290 0.03727 324 218 73 33
996 #1: Style. #2: They're not nailed to my feet. 1.4290 0.03649 324 215 79 30
997 I was in a rush this morning and completely forgot to change out of my stall slippers. 1.4290 0.03934 331 233 54 44
998 You realize my problem isn’t so much the color... 1.4290 0.03682 331 230 63 38
999 Are you sure that I'm the one on the outside of the fence? 1.4286 0.04089 322 231 44 47
1000 Now no one can tell who's who. 1.4286 0.04202 329 243 31 55
1001 I suppose you’ll want the matching saddlebag now 1.4286 0.03660 329 220 77 32
1002 Thanks for supporting my new identity 1.4286 0.03599 322 224 63 35
1003 Well, I don't like it either but it's my job and carrying me while I do it is your job. 1.4286 0.04246 329 245 27 57
1004 They were out of wingtips in your size. 1.4286 0.03797 329 233 54 42
1005 It’s not fair! I’m always on the bottom! 1.4286 0.04202 329 243 31 55
1006 I think it's about time you accept me for who I am as a person, Bob. 1.4286 0.03999 329 234 49 46
1007 The next time I walk into a bar, they'll remember my name! 1.4286 0.03476 322 207 92 23
1008 Look's like we're never going to get anywhere. 1.4286 0.04113 329 239 39 51
1009 If you were a sea horse you'd know the difference between port and starboard! 1.4286 0.04224 329 244 29 56
1010 Ridiculous? That's rich coming from the guy wearing THAT hat! 1.4286 0.03820 322 220 66 36
1011 Don’t step on the ones in front. They’re suede. 1.4286 0.03678 322 217 73 32
1012 Don't worry, cowboy. They're made out of vegan leather. 1.4286 0.04113 329 239 39 51
1013 I just thought some variety might be nice 1.4286 0.04068 329 237 43 49
1014 maybe that's why we animals are more empathetic. we can walk a mile in two people's shoes 1.4286 0.03785 329 225 67 37
1015 Braydon or Kayleigh? And you're saying the answer's already inside me? 1.4281 0.04133 327 238 38 51
1016 I'm sorry...blacksmiths were determined to be non-essential workers. 1.4277 0.03508 325 216 81 28
1017 Tell you what, you nail some iron plates to the bottom of your feet and then I'll take them off. 1.4272 0.03709 323 217 74 32
1018 I haven't tried the blue shoes, but let me show you what happens when I tap the red ones together and say "There's no place like home." 1.4272 0.04149 323 235 38 50
1019 It's my way of letting you know, I'm non binary. 1.4272 0.03898 323 232 47 44
1020 « The angels wanna wear the red shoes. » 1.4268 0.04238 321 237 31 53
1021 I didn't know Imelda Marcos bred horses. 1.4268 0.04002 321 227 51 43
1022 For want of nail polish .... 1.4268 0.03978 321 226 53 42
1023 You choose which color and I get to chews your hat. 1.4263 0.04236 319 235 32 52
1024 I got all the same color last time and had buyer's remorse. 1.4263 0.03715 319 214 74 31
1025 It looks like you've been to town without me. 1.4263 0.03552 319 208 86 25
1026 New farrier? 1.4263 0.04166 319 232 38 49
1027 I’m going for kind of a festive Helmut Newton look. 1.4263 0.04189 319 233 36 50
1028 You can cancel that appointment with the blacksmith. I found these online. 1.4263 0.03552 319 208 86 25
1029 They're stylish, but they're useless for playing horseshoes. 1.4263 0.04142 319 231 40 48
1030 Why you didn't mention social distancing? I though you didn't like my hooves... 1.4263 0.04305 319 238 26 55
1031 Nice colors! But to enter reality you have to choose to be spelled to black and white. 1.4263 0.04118 319 235 34 50
1032 Well it’s too late now. They’re nailed on. 1.4263 0.03662 319 212 78 29
1033 Screw those "horse shoes",these make me feel better about myself. 1.4263 0.03947 319 223 56 40
1034 Ok... But, this is the last time. You really have to learn how to tie your own shoes. 1.4263 0.03580 319 212 81 26
1035 you buy him expensive horseshoes and look; he takes you're wife's. 1.4263 0.04213 319 234 34 51
1036 Hurry, tomorrow i can still return them 1.4263 0.04236 319 235 32 52
1037 Sorry Bob, I have a date tonight. 1.4263 0.03897 319 226 52 41
1038 *'HOLY TOLEDO' "You can afford converse?!" 1.4263 0.03947 319 223 56 40
1039 Clean my stall and I'll consider going back to those open-toe iron models. 1.4259 0.03540 317 206 87 24
1040 The therapist recommended I try walking a mile in your shoes. 1.4259 0.03468 317 211 80 26
1041 I suppose you want me to just get right back on you without mentioning your shoes. 1.4259 0.04003 317 226 48 43
1042 You’re going with flats? 1.4259 0.03705 317 212 75 30
1043 Be honest. 1.4254 0.03776 315 213 70 32
1044 If the shoe fits 1.4254 0.03881 315 217 62 36
1045 My turn! 1.4254 0.04254 315 232 32 51
1046 Well, your hat embarrasses me. 1.4254 0.03667 315 209 78 28
1047 Everyone's gonna remember you wore those last year. 1.4254 0.03667 315 209 78 28
1048 I just love how open this range is. 1.4254 0.03694 315 210 76 29
1049 I call them ‘shooves'. 1.4252 0.03639 301 196 82 23
1050 I might be Ragtime Cowboy Joe, but that doesn’t explain your choice of footwear. 1.4252 0.04359 301 222 30 49
1051 They're very nice, thank you. But I'm still not going to dance with you. 1.4252 0.03973 301 210 55 36
1052 Do you think it is easy being an influencer? 1.4252 0.03624 301 201 76 24
1053 They look purple when I run. 1.4252 0.03846 301 203 68 30
1054 They're corrective. 1.4252 0.03759 301 205 66 30
1055 Shoes without socks? I don't think so Buckaroo. 1.4252 0.02912 301 207 73 21
1056 I think I prefer the stilettos. 1.4252 0.04070 301 211 52 38
1057 This is your first rodeo, correct? 1.4252 0.03699 301 198 78 25
1058 Ya know, I’m not like other horses. 1.4252 0.04015 301 209 56 36
1059 Oh, you think I look ridiculous? With that hat? 1.4252 0.03684 301 204 69 28
1060 He asked me, finally, "What shoes would YOU like to wear?" 1.4250 0.03912 320 223 58 39
1061 They ran out of coconut shells at the store 1.4250 0.04236 320 239 27 54
1062 Who hasn't got horse sense? It was you who shoed the horse? 1.4249 0.04346 313 234 25 54
1063 Next time don't take me to an Italian blacksmith. 1.4249 0.03683 313 208 77 28
1064 Tell me you have the matching bag. 1.4249 0.04029 313 221 51 41
1065 Well, you're the one who invited the"Queer Eye" crew. 1.4249 0.03766 313 211 71 31
1066 The stable was dark when I picked out these shoes. What’s your excuse? 1.4249 0.03271 313 211 79 23
1067 Really? 1.4249 0.04323 313 233 27 53
1068 Yes I did watch Kinky Boots last night, why do you ask? 1.4249 0.03711 313 209 75 29
1069 Listen, Walter. I didn't question how you spent your stimulus check. 1.4241 0.03658 316 210 78 28
1070 I'd say the blue, definitely the blue. 1.4236 0.03729 314 211 73 30
1071 Darn it! Missus will get mad again! 1.4231 0.04188 312 227 38 47
1072 There was a 2 for 1 sale at the horseshoe factory. 1.4231 0.04188 312 227 38 47
1073 Hey! No more shin splits! 1.4231 0.04285 312 231 30 51
1074 I feel like you're expecting me to say something. 1.4226 0.03977 265 176 66 23
1075 When I said, "we're going to ride into town in style," that's not what I had in mind. 1.4226 0.04057 310 220 49 41
1076 I refuse to ride on a horse with mismatched shoes 1.4226 0.04108 310 222 45 43
1077 My blacksmith wasn't wearing a mask for corona virus 1.4226 0.04270 310 231 28 51
1078 Believe me,they'll be looking at your hat and not my shoes. 1.4221 0.03780 308 208 70 30
1079 I'm none too pleased either. They're made of leather. 1.4221 0.03638 308 203 80 25
1080 You may think you know what I need, Bob, but the new blacksmith knows what I want. 1.4221 0.03667 308 204 78 26
1081 Yessir, how’d you know they were orthopedic? 1.4221 0.03780 308 208 70 30
1082 My wife’s online quarantine shopping has gone too far... 1.4221 0.03945 308 219 50 39
1083 Your hat seems....a bit much. 1.4221 0.03985 308 218 51 39
1084 Wearing the same color shoes is so 2015 1.4216 0.03840 306 216 54 36
1085 I'm looking for a color that says, "Not the glue factory!" 1.4216 0.03712 306 204 75 27
1086 I couldn't find my saddle shoes. 1.4216 0.03639 306 204 76 26
1087 I’ve walked a mile in your shoes. Now, pony up. 1.4216 0.03712 306 204 75 27
1088 What’s with the hat? 1.4211 0.03787 304 205 70 29
1089 Quit horsing around. 1.4211 0.04037 304 214 52 38
1090 If you can wear that hat, you have nothing to say about my shoes. 1.4211 0.03550 304 197 86 21
1091 Sorry Randall, I guess I don’t really know what dressage is 1.4207 0.04150 271 187 54 30
1092 They’re nice, but I was really hoping for some mules 1.4205 0.03891 302 207 63 32
1093 The goat wants to know if she can borrow your green purse. 1.4205 0.03805 302 204 69 29
1094 Green means 'Go', Red means 'Whoa'. 1.4205 0.04164 302 217 43 42
1095 What? You asked me to bring back two pairs of mules! 1.4205 0.03805 302 204 69 29
1096 You said 'casual', right? 1.4205 0.03612 302 200 78 24
1097 They’re comfy, stylish, and if you rob a bank the sheriff will think we’re three men on foot. 1.4205 0.03642 302 201 76 25
1098 OK, all you need is a shirt and a mask and you can come in. 1.4205 0.04084 302 214 49 39
1099 - oh boy... this is the "new normality" style, dear, go get used to it 1.4205 0.03732 302 227 34 41
1100 joe, does anything really matter anymore? 1.4205 0.03919 302 208 61 33
1101 If I told you once, Tex, I told you a million times -- never buy rodeo shoes on Rodeo Drive. 1.4197 0.03602 305 200 82 23
1102 Sorry about the discouraging word. 1.4197 0.03890 305 210 62 33
1103 Only 12 shopping days till Christmas 1.4186 0.04329 301 223 30 48
1104 Maybe in New York, but not here. 1.4181 0.03742 299 200 73 26
1105 So is it "he", "she", or "they"? 1.4181 0.04086 299 212 49 38
1106 The cowboy sized up his trusty steed and was surprised that it wasn't wearing mules 1.4181 0.04326 299 221 31 47
1107 Really, Jeb? I think the hat's a bit much. 1.4181 0.03772 299 211 55 33
1108 Instead of hay this evening, I would prefer a souffle." 1.4175 0.03759 297 199 72 26
1109 These are good for everyday, but I’ll need mules for the steep hills. 1.4175 0.03819 297 201 68 28
1110 What's wrong? Why aren't you dressed yet? 1.4175 0.03789 297 200 70 27
1111 But I'm color blind. 1.4169 0.04099 295 214 41 40
1112 I didn't want to be all tapped out. 1.4169 0.04318 295 217 33 45
1113 Those aren't very sensible shoes." "Neither is that hat. 1.4169 0.04210 295 213 41 41
1114 Are those my wife's shoes?" - Buzz Heidtke, Nashville, T 1.4169 0.04345 295 218 31 46
1115 ...but do they make me look fat? 1.4169 0.03867 295 201 65 29
1116 Okay, let me explain the Doppler Effect one more time... 1.4169 0.04318 295 217 33 45
1117 I think I’ll buy my wife the pink ones 1.4169 0.04371 295 219 29 47
1118 I didn’t ask if you liked them, I asked you if they made my feet look fat. 1.4164 0.03946 293 202 60 31
1119 It’s a wedding! Where is your Fedora? 1.4164 0.04204 293 211 42 40
1120 Whispering is fine, but my ears don't go any further forward and I still can't hear a thing! 1.4164 0.04499 293 222 20 51
1121 It was buy one get one Jim. What would YOU do? 1.4164 0.03825 293 198 68 27
1122 They're part of the Nike, " Just Shoe It" campaign 1.4164 0.04091 293 207 50 36
1123 You think my shoes are silly? What about your hat? 1.4164 0.03764 293 196 72 25
1124 I tired of being just a clothes horse. 1.4164 0.03701 293 194 76 23
1125 What makes me think you know the whereabouts of those missing hikers? 1.4164 0.03669 293 193 78 22
1126 I said dressage, not dress-up. 1.4158 0.03750 291 199 65 27
1127 Darn right they look good. No annoying nails either, so it's not like I'm sacrificing comfort. 1.4158 0.03654 291 191 79 21
1128 Seriously? Well, you live in an echo chamber; Wish.com is like, my whole shit 1.4158 0.04444 291 218 25 48
1129 Yes, ma mare let me dress myself this morning. 1.4158 0.04281 291 212 37 42
1130 Couldn't help myself. I thought it was a steal. 1.4158 0.04254 291 211 39 41
1131 My one extravagance. I’ve never said a word about your hat. 1.4158 0.04198 291 209 43 39
1132 No socks? 1.4155 0.03827 296 201 67 28
1133 Wrong again! It’s ‘stop’ then ‘go.’ 1.4152 0.04015 289 211 40 38
1134 Zappos. Why? 1.4152 0.03671 289 190 78 21
1135 Your idea of "horseshoe" is so....limited. 1.4152 0.03893 289 197 64 28
1136 You're criticizing my choice of shoes while wearing that hat? 1.4152 0.03768 289 193 72 24
1137 Horse: OK new boots but no panties I hope? That hat looks ominous. you can ride on my back but anything else is off-limits. 1.4152 0.04468 289 217 24 48
1138 I've had lower back pain for years. These shoes have changed my life. 1.4152 0.03671 289 190 78 21
1139 I found them in your closet. 1.4152 0.03417 289 200 65 24
1140 I know, I’m sorry, It’s the best I can manage while the farrier is quarantining. 1.4152 0.03831 289 195 68 26
1141 Bloomingdales.....why do you ask? 1.4134 0.03937 254 168 67 19
1142 The blacksmith works part time at Zappos. 1.4132 0.03578 288 187 83 18
1143 Who let you buy those? 1.4132 0.04229 288 210 38 40
1144 No, it’s Crazy Hat Day, Mark! Tomorrow is Mismatch Day! 1.4132 0.04069 288 205 48 35
1145 You’re wearing them on the wrong hoof 1.4132 0.04314 288 211 35 42
1146 Sorry this is late,was due July 19th. But just in case you haven't picked three contenders here's my caption for last weeks cartoon,the giraffe coming through the floor. 1.4132 0.04533 288 219 19 50
1147 This is the last time I let you watch “Brokeback Mountain”. 1.4132 0.03933 288 198 61 29
1148 I’m getting so used to working from home I’m not sure I can go back to the old uniform 1.4132 0.03994 288 200 57 31
1149 When I told you I needed new shoes, these are not the kind I meant. 1.4130 0.03698 293 212 48 33
1150 This is the last time I send you to get shod on your own. 1.4126 0.03729 286 190 74 22
1151 I'm keeping them, Frederick. And the baby. 1.4126 0.03952 286 197 60 29
1152 I’d thought I’d trip the range fantastic! 1.4126 0.04476 286 215 24 47
1153 No, you can't borrow my hat 1.4126 0.03952 286 197 60 29
1154 What? I said “Siri, order me horseshoes” 1.4126 0.03858 286 194 66 26
1155 Think about the Instagram possibilities 1.4120 0.04034 284 198 55 31
1156 It's bridle couture. 1.4120 0.03812 284 191 69 24
1157 Rodeo. Not Rodeo Drive! 1.4120 0.03972 284 196 59 29
1158 So what, you’re a DEMOCRAT now? 1.4120 0.04303 284 207 37 40
1159 They’re not calfskin, if that’s what you’re wondering. 1.4120 0.03796 284 193 66 25
1160 I know, I got dressed in the dark. 1.4120 0.03679 284 187 77 20
1161 Wow, two left feet and two right feet! Kewl 1.4120 0.04245 284 205 41 38
1162 My Smith is quite colorful. 1.4120 0.04417 284 211 29 44
1163 Did you tame me for my Jordan's? 1.4120 0.04360 284 209 33 42
1164 What gave you the impression that I was happy having pieces of metal nailed to my feet? 1.4120 0.03779 284 190 71 23
1165 As it turns out, the new blacksmith is from Italy and I wasn’t completely clear in my order. 1.4120 0.03267 284 197 69 18
1166 We're not going to the barn together if you're going to wear that ugly hat again. 1.4120 0.04126 284 201 49 34
1167 I miss the clippity clop 1.4120 0.03679 284 187 77 20
1168 See, I told you I needed another fitting. 1.4120 0.04095 284 205 43 36
1169 Looks like you lost yer tiara. 1.4120 0.04095 284 205 43 36
1170 Dammit, I gotta be me Frank! Just be glad I said no to the hot pink Louboutin sling backs” 1.4120 0.03972 284 201 51 32
1171 Hay gurl hayyy 1.4120 0.04360 284 209 33 42
1172 Be honest, do they match my saddle... 1.4120 0.03746 284 189 73 22
1173 Not even the younglings survived. 1.4120 0.04528 284 215 21 48
1174 My shoes? What about your hat? 1.4120 0.04095 284 200 51 33
1175 This is how I cope, David. 1.4120 0.03828 284 194 64 26
1176 I look ridiculous? Have you seen your hat? 1.4118 0.03635 289 190 79 20
1177 Technically, they are horseshoes. 1.4115 0.03974 243 160 66 17
1178 Your Tinder profile was slightly misleading. 1.4113 0.04117 282 199 50 33
1179 Hurry up and get on! I don’t want to be late for ballet rehearsal AGAIN. 1.4111 0.04093 287 203 50 34
1180 Never judge someone until you've walked a mile in his shoes. 1.4107 0.03465 280 191 69 20
1181 Am I about to hear a discouraging word? 1.4101 0.03697 278 183 76 19
1182 I know all God’s children got shoes, but we’re only going out to the back forty. 1.4101 0.04328 278 205 33 40
1183 I don't know, it behooved me! 1.4101 0.04097 278 195 52 31
1184 Better but a little too try hard Trigger 1.4101 0.04402 278 205 32 41
1185 Well obviously they look silly now, Jim. But once I shave my legs, you’ll see. 1.4099 0.03853 283 192 66 25
1186 I couldn't say neigh. 1.4094 0.03922 276 188 63 25
1187 Why would you be more surprised by my footwear than my ability to talk, Bill? 1.4094 0.04021 276 191 57 28
1188 Try walking a mile in my shoes. 1.4093 0.04064 281 197 53 31
1189 How do you fit that ridiculous hat inside your glass house Mr. Stone Thrower? 1.4093 0.04277 281 204 39 38
1190 With that hat, who are you to judge? 1.4073 0.03793 275 184 70 21
1191 Now that's a horse of a different color. 1.4073 0.04223 275 197 44 34
1192 RuPaul is my ferrier. 1.4073 0.03704 275 194 55 26
1193 Online shoes options are no excuse 1.4073 0.04467 275 205 28 42
1194 They're orthopedic. 1.4073 0.03964 275 189 60 26
1195 Are my horseshoes woke enough for you this week? 1.4073 0.04144 275 197 45 33
1196 ‘The sign said no shoes, no service.’ 1.4073 0.04030 275 191 56 28
1197 I’m feeling more Pastel-omino these days. 1.4073 0.04408 275 203 32 40
1198 Enough of this laissez-faire attitude. You know it is red on port, green on starboard. 1.4066 0.04246 273 196 43 34
1199 CHAPARRAL Blacksmith? I thought you said Schiaparelli. 1.4066 0.03740 273 181 73 19
1200 I bought them to wear to the winners circle after the race. 1.4066 0.04182 273 194 47 32
1201 I'd go with the pink in the front. 1.4066 0.04018 273 189 57 27
1202 What? The farrier was closed. 1.4066 0.04493 273 204 27 42
1203 It’s called dressage. Not dress-anyway-you-like! 1.4059 0.04005 271 187 58 26
1204 I heard you tell Dusty that I needed new shooes. 1.4059 0.04457 271 201 30 40
1205 They say dress for the job you want. 1.4059 0.03830 271 182 68 21
1206 Hell no I ain’t changin’ your damn shoes! 1.4059 0.04269 271 195 42 34
1207 They're from my ferrier godmother. 1.4059 0.03936 271 185 62 24
1208 Horse and person say at the same time..."Stop judging me" 1.4059 0.04548 271 204 24 43
1209 can you walk a mile in these? 1.4053 0.04287 264 189 43 32
1210 Which color goes best with my eyes and mane ? 1.4052 0.04513 269 201 27 41
1211 I didn't wanna look too matchy-matchy. 1.4052 0.03850 269 181 67 21
1212 That virus may have given you brains, but it didn't give you good taste. 1.4052 0.04194 269 193 44 32
1213 At least I’m trying here. I’m trying, Steve. For us. 1.4052 0.03813 269 180 69 20
1214 Next time I’m getting the slip-ons. 1.4052 0.03921 269 183 63 23
1215 You’re right, the blue really does bring out your eyes 1.4052 0.03991 269 185 59 25
1216 So, I've walked the mile and I still think you're overstating your difficulties. 1.4051 0.03904 274 187 63 24
1217 Only if you promise to burn that hat. 1.4045 0.03869 267 180 66 21
1218 Would you categorize the horse show as formal or casual? 1.4045 0.03721 267 176 74 17
1219 It's called power clashing, look it up Joe. 1.4045 0.04413 267 196 34 37
1220 Definitely better than the high heels. 1.4045 0.04316 267 193 40 34
1221 So this IS your first rodeo? 1.4045 0.03977 267 183 60 24
1222 Them looks more like whoreshoes. 1.4045 0.04047 267 185 56 26
1223 What? You're going to judge me with that hat on? 1.4044 0.03959 272 187 60 25
1224 They had run out of mules 1.4038 0.03889 265 179 65 21
1225 No! No, I'm not two people in a horse costume! Why do you ask? I mean...neigh. 1.4038 0.04307 265 191 41 33
1226 How is your girlfriend at the nail salon? 1.4038 0.04438 265 195 33 37
1227 Now we can tell our six feet apart 1.4038 0.03925 265 180 63 22
1228 Your heart says Biden but your ass says Trump. 1.4030 0.04264 263 188 44 31
1229 Italian blacksmith? 1.4030 0.03982 263 180 60 23
1230 As I said, if you ride with that hat, I ride with these shoes 1.4030 0.03834 263 176 68 19
1231 Next season Farriergamo, baby! 1.4030 0.04331 263 190 40 33
1232 There goes the stud fee. 1.4025 0.04304 236 164 49 23
1233 You try finding two pairs in my size. 1.4024 0.04015 246 166 61 19
1234 I just got tired of doing everything on the hoof. 1.4023 0.04356 261 194 31 36
1235 Hey they fit like a hoof 1.4023 0.04522 261 194 29 38
1236 two pair beats a pair any day! 1.4023 0.03891 261 176 65 20
1237 They make me giddy. Yup they do. 1.4023 0.03891 261 176 65 20
1238 "Did the ferrier choose those or did you? 1.4023 0.04112 261 192 37 32
1239 Is that your hat or are you just happy to see me? 1.4023 0.04112 261 182 53 26
1240 I really don't like election years. 1.4023 0.04253 261 191 37 33
1241 They’ll be less conspicuous in the Sunday funnies. 1.4023 0.04423 261 191 35 35
1242 But they're the best running shoes on the market... 1.4023 0.04489 261 193 31 37
1243 I see by my outfit that you ain't no farrier... 1.4023 0.04489 261 193 31 37
1244 If his horse is cute I’m not wearing a mask 1.4023 0.04456 261 192 33 36
1245 You might want to go with a fedora instead 1.4023 0.03576 261 183 60 18
1246 Too slutty? 1.4022 0.03967 271 187 59 25
1247 You miss your wife, don't you? 1.4017 0.03418 239 173 47 19
1248 You named me Lady. What did you expect? 1.4015 0.03668 264 178 68 18
1249 Maybe that 2 for 1 pair deal at the blacksmith was a bad idea. 1.4008 0.04170 262 190 41 31
1250 and is it too much to ask for a matching feedbag? 1.4008 0.03842 262 176 67 19
1251 Sorry—I’d rather not get them dirty. 1.4000 0.04049 260 180 56 24
1252 Ruby slippers; blue suede shoes. I couldn't decide, so I got 'em both. 1.4000 0.04122 260 182 52 26
1253 I'm glad you finally put the heels away and went sensible. 1.4000 0.03975 260 178 60 22
1254 What? It's casual Friday. 1.4000 0.04012 260 179 58 23
1255 Your plan worked. I’m already being more careful where I poop. 1.4000 0.03823 260 174 68 18
1256 Do I pick out your shoes? 1.4000 0.03861 260 175 66 19
1257 Now... dance! 1.4000 0.04211 260 192 35 33
1258 We do not want a repeat of last week, Roy. When you swing your partner, remember that I have two left feet. 1.4000 0.04501 260 193 30 37
1259 Don't say a word cowboy....horses need style too! 1.4000 0.04281 260 189 39 32
1260 I like the blue. They make your eyes pop. 1.4000 0.03900 260 176 64 20
1261 I prefer a saddle shoe. 1.4000 0.03937 260 177 62 21
1262 You should talk; I wouldn't be caught dead in that hat" 1.4000 0.04086 260 181 54 25
1263 Did I make a fuss when you traded in your cowboy booots for those penny loafers? 1.4000 0.03704 260 171 74 15
1264 Thanks to you, now it's all weird 1.4000 0.04298 260 187 42 31
1265 No, I'm not overdressed, we're going to the horse opera. 1.4000 0.04434 260 191 34 35
1266 I was feeling my masculine and feminine sides today 1.4000 0.04122 260 182 52 26
1267 dude look at my new shoes 1.4000 0.04501 260 193 30 37
1268 We can’t go bowling during a pandemic, Buck. 1.4000 0.02159 260 193 54 13
1269 So...the first farrier I got to was quarantined. And then the next. And the next. Then I saw a Payless Shoes that was open... 1.4000 0.04158 260 183 50 27
1270 Why should zebras have all the fun? 1.3992 0.03753 263 175 71 17
1271 If we’re going to ride off into the sunset, we might as well do it in style. 1.3992 0.03715 263 174 73 16
1272 I don't see why you're angry with me expressing myself. 1.3992 0.04626 258 195 23 40
1273 You didn't know I could talk, either 1.3992 0.03939 258 178 58 22
1274 And the best... NO NAILS! 1.3992 0.03803 258 172 69 17
1275 Not dress shoes, Bucky. Dres-SAGE. 1.3992 0.04089 258 182 50 26
1276 You don't want to ride me while I wear these? - Double win. 1.3985 0.03733 261 173 72 16
1277 They're fine for prancing but what about rounding up cattle? 1.3985 0.04215 261 186 46 29
1278 Why can't I wear cowboy boots?" 'Cause your a horse, that's why! 1.3985 0.04583 261 197 24 40
1279 When he said two for the price of one, it was hard to resist. 1.3985 0.04250 261 187 44 30
1280 Don't blame me for my taste in shoes. You're the one who had me gelded! 1.3985 0.04180 261 185 48 28
1281 I KNOW! Finding a saddle bag to match is gonna be a bitch! 1.3985 0.03888 261 177 64 20
1282 Intellectually, I'm a Democrat, but my ass will always be Republican. 1.3985 0.04036 261 181 56 24
1283 Well if you don’t like them you can just walk! 1.3985 0.03925 261 178 62 21
1284 Yes, they're new, Steve. I guess you can say I'm financially stable." 1.3985 0.04551 261 196 26 39
1285 It’s part of their ‘Home-On-The’ range. 1.3984 0.04520 256 190 30 36
1286 I know loyalty is important - I'm just saying it's time to try another blacksmith. 1.3984 0.03862 256 172 66 18
1287 You're wearing them wrong: green on the right, red on the left. 1.3984 0.04294 256 186 39 31
1288 I just wanted to give you something to "Whoa!" about. 1.3984 0.03979 256 175 60 21
1289 It's horseshoes Hank, not whore shoes 1.3984 0.04417 256 187 36 33
1290 I don't care how they look; they're more comfortable than the iron ones. 1.3984 0.04093 256 178 54 24
1291 What? So you're the only one who gets to have a mid-life crisis? 1.3977 0.03869 259 175 65 19
1292 Can you give 0 stars on Angie’s List? 1.3976 0.04478 254 187 33 34
1293 Gus, I’m gender fluid. Calling me a stud is no longer appropriate. 1.3976 0.04077 254 176 55 23
1294 But with these, I can stylishly evade a posse all day and go right into an evening at the saloon. 1.3976 0.04172 254 181 46 27
1295 Well heck, Besse, if it means that much to you, I’ll refer to you from now on as ‘they’ 1.3976 0.04077 254 176 55 23
1296 It’s the new normal, Carl. 1.3976 0.03842 254 170 67 17
1297 But you seemed to like when that woman was wearing them! 1.3974 0.04217 229 157 53 19
1298 Trigger likes to know when I'm in estrus. 1.3969 0.04439 262 194 32 36
1299 do these shoes make my hips look big? 1.3969 0.03889 257 174 64 19
1300 Would it kill you to put a little whimsy in your giddy-up? 1.3968 0.03758 252 172 63 17
1301 Dang! Zappos got your shoe order wrong again. 1.3968 0.04539 252 187 30 35
1302 I just wandered through the Painted Desert. 1.3968 0.03694 252 176 59 17
1303 Yes, I am non-binary, but I don't think this is an effective way to manifest that." OR "I love them, but--just so you know--I won't be able to gallop as fast. 1.3968 0.04343 252 184 37 31
1304 Stylish, plus the greens go 'clippety" and the reds go "clop." 1.3968 0.04176 252 177 50 25
1305 Don’t judge me. It’s quarantine. I’m bored. I’m discovering myself. 1.3968 0.03982 252 172 60 20
1306 Let’s stay out of the mud today, okay? 1.3966 0.04266 232 161 50 21
1307 What happens on the range stays on the range. 1.3965 0.04265 227 159 47 21
1308 I couldn't say nay. 1.3960 0.04044 250 172 57 21
1309 Now that’s a horse shoe of a different color. 1.3960 0.04083 250 173 55 22
1310 There isn't a lawman west of 5th Avenue who'll be able to track us. 1.3960 0.04083 250 173 55 22
1311 It was a spur of the moment decision... 1.3960 0.04083 250 173 55 22
1312 Which way to the gender reveal party? 1.3960 0.04044 250 172 57 21
1313 Maybe you will think twice before you use my shoes again for some yard game. 1.3960 0.04276 250 178 45 27
1314 And you’re hat is O.K.? 1.3960 0.03580 250 173 61 16
1315 When you searched for "shoes" on Amazon, did you by chance think to try "horseshoes"? 1.3960 0.04313 250 179 43 28
1316 Could you give me a hand with the laces? 1.3960 0.03943 250 172 58 20
1317 Please tell me you bought some protection spray, because we might traven some unpaved roads.” 1.3960 0.04739 250 191 19 40
1318 I wanted happy feet. 1.3960 0.03840 250 167 67 16
1319 No, stilettos are your fantasy. 1.3960 0.04123 250 174 53 23
1320 Are you honestly trying to mansplain horseshoes to ME?! 1.3960 0.03777 250 170 63 17
1321 Yeah, well happy trails to you. 1.3960 0.03964 250 170 61 19
1322 It's a long ride, and this way we can use either restroom. 1.3960 0.04044 250 172 57 21
1323 Half of me wants to stop and the other half wants to go. 1.3960 0.03840 250 175 55 20
1324 The sand is too hot 1.3960 0.04405 250 189 26 35
1325 It’s called fashion, Gerald. Look it up. Then burn that hat. 1.3960 0.04004 250 171 59 20
1326 Don't tell mom. 1.3960 0.04083 250 173 55 22
1327 BOGO sales are targeted at me. 1.3960 0.01189 250 185 56 9
1328 I’m an independent. 1.3953 0.03970 253 173 60 20
1329 I'll walk. 1.3953 0.04009 253 174 58 21
1330 He said these are the latest fashion for summer 1.3953 0.04593 253 190 26 37
1331 I don't want us to win again on choreography and lose on costume. 1.3952 0.03985 248 169 60 19
1332 I couldn't decide so I got them both. 1.3952 0.03775 248 164 70 14
1333 You will NEVER be a horse with NO NAME again. 1.3952 0.03985 248 169 60 19
1334 I said farrier, not Ferragamo! 1.3952 0.04204 248 177 45 26
1335 Some kind of cowboy, you are. You can't shoe a horse, and you can't pick out a decent hat. 1.3952 0.04066 248 171 56 21
1336 Ok, for the World Cup we can switch to blues on my lefts and pinks on my rights. 1.3952 0.04413 248 180 38 30
1337 Oh yeah? Well, you're all shoes, no Lone Ranger. 1.3952 0.04734 248 189 20 39
1338 Sorry, Patches. I know they’re a bit tight, but close counts in horseshoes, right? 1.3952 0.04319 248 180 39 29
1339 Don’t worry. These aren’t my running shoes. 1.3947 0.04521 190 129 47 14
1340 Looks like the old grey mare ain't what s/he used to be. 1.3944 0.02360 251 179 61 11
1341 I won them in a game of horseshoes. 1.3944 0.03951 251 171 61 19
1342 The second pair was 50% off. 1.3944 0.03807 251 170 64 17
1343 If it wasn't for those ridiculous shoes I would be taller! 1.3944 0.04551 251 187 29 35
1344 They make me feel young again. 1.3944 0.03951 251 171 61 19
1345 They're okay, but I really wanted saddle shoes." 1.3944 0.04031 251 173 57 21
1346 Wow! What a s(c)andal! 1.3944 0.04655 251 190 23 38
1347 I'm afraid The West just ain't that wild anymore. 1.3943 0.04048 246 169 57 20
1348 How many times do I have to tell you to stay out of my closet! 1.3943 0.04248 246 174 47 25
1349 You can lead a horse to fashion but you cannot make him chic. 1.3943 0.04007 246 168 59 19
1350 Give me back my hat Ted, you look ridiculous 1.3943 0.04287 246 175 45 26
1351 Those shoes ain’t goin anywhere partner 1.3943 0.04622 246 184 27 35
1352 When you told me I should walk a mile in your shoes, I assumed you were speaking metaphorically. 1.3937 0.04035 254 176 56 22
1353 And I thought I got out of bed on the wrong foot? 1.3936 0.04507 249 184 32 33
1354 Prada’s and Versace? You are the Italian stallion! 1.3936 0.04323 249 179 42 28
1355 Let’s switch back 1.3936 0.04342 249 182 37 30
1356 I did it Bill. I walked a mile in your shoes. You might be gay. 1.3936 0.04210 249 176 48 25
1357 You’re right, the lower heels feel much better. 1.3934 0.03944 244 165 62 17
1358 Please respect my journey. 1.3934 0.03944 244 165 62 17
1359 Didn't expect mules, did you? 1.3934 0.04152 244 170 52 22
1360 Business up front; Party in the back 1.3934 0.04070 244 173 48 23
1361 Sometimes I just want to feel pretty. 1.3934 0.04111 244 169 54 21
1362 You know, that comment spurs another thought. 1.3934 0.04408 244 179 35 30
1363 Yes, the gelding was my choice. 1.3934 0.04408 244 179 35 30
1364 I just feel faster in wingtips. 1.3934 0.04091 244 171 51 22
1365 No name? And you're supposed to carry me to this desert? 1.3934 0.04331 244 177 39 28
1366 I found my sole, mate 1.3934 0.04577 244 181 30 33
1367 Yes well, your hat looks ridiculous. 1.3934 0.03987 244 166 60 18
1368 I wanted something less “clomp clomp” and more “ooh la la.” 1.3929 0.04371 224 157 46 21
1369 Yes Lester, I’m gay. But it doesn’t mean I can’t be your trusty steed. 1.3918 0.03888 245 170 56 19
1370 Says the man with matching guns. 1.3918 0.03621 245 172 56 17
1371 Now you can try mine on. I'll get the nails. 1.3918 0.04098 245 170 54 21
1372 I said "gotta jimmy the shoes", not "get Jimmy Choo's" 1.3911 0.03919 248 181 42 25
1373 I like to dance with the stars. 1.3911 0.02589 248 179 56 13
1374 No, no, I love them, really I do, but shouldn't they match the saddle? 1.3911 0.03999 225 158 49 18
1375 I’m absolutely loving the new blacksmith. 1.3909 0.03909 243 164 63 16
1376 Why gallop when I can chassé? 1.3909 0.04037 243 167 57 19
1377 If I can't tell you, who then? the hat doesn't work 1.3909 0.04243 243 172 47 24
1378 NOW can we do Dressage? 1.3909 0.04121 243 169 53 21
1379 I understand that close is also good enough for hand grenades. 1.3909 0.04735 243 185 21 37
1380 They distract from the fact that I can talk 1.3909 0.04079 243 168 55 20
1381 Maybe he saw how we treat the dogs. 1.3909 0.04735 243 185 21 37
1382 I know my hat's a little ridiculous, but what the hell is up with those socks ? 1.3909 0.04663 243 183 25 35
1383 You dodo! You're suppose to wear the red ones on your right feet. 1.3909 0.04663 243 183 25 35
1384 You know I can't wear your shoes." Patrick Thompson Georgetown, S 1.3909 0.04699 243 186 20 37
1385 I had to fet off because I wasn't high enough. Do those fit? 1.3909 0.04699 243 184 23 36
1386 Looks like your hat likes my shoes 1.3909 0.04477 243 178 35 30
1387 Don't forget or your in big trouble, front heels- Kentucky, back heels- Kansas. 1.3909 0.04571 243 183 26 34
1388 Decisions are tough these days. 1.3909 0.04626 243 182 27 34
1389 - What happened to your shoes? +I was on the President's test! 1.3909 0.04807 243 187 17 39
1390 Is this too dressy for a gender reveal party? 1.3909 0.04243 243 179 36 28
1391 You really went with it with that 10 gallon hat. 1.3909 0.04458 243 180 32 31
1392 Are my shoes really what you should be interested in, Gary? 1.3909 0.04121 243 169 53 21
1393 I don’t want to be known as “The Horse With No Name” anymore. Henceforth I shall be known as “The Horse With Sensible Shoes”. 1.3901 0.04520 182 123 47 12
1394 Thanks for letting this pony express himself. 1.3900 0.03974 241 164 60 17
1395 I got them on Rodeo Drive. 1.3900 0.04144 241 168 52 21
1396 Well yeah,we are two guys in a suit. After three years driving cattle we thought you knew that. 1.3900 0.04186 241 169 50 22
1397 Prada. 1.3900 0.04060 241 166 56 19
1398 Do you prefer he, she or they? 1.3900 0.04060 241 166 56 19
1399 Rodeo Drive wasn’t at all like I expected. 1.3900 0.03930 241 163 62 16
1400 What’s the matter, you’ve never seen horse Choos before? 1.3900 0.04227 241 170 48 23
1401 Why shouldn't cattle herding be fabulous? 1.3900 0.03974 241 164 60 17
1402 All the blacksmiths were closed, so I went to Bloomingdales. 1.3900 0.04017 241 165 58 18
1403 Yes, but do they say, "Rodeo?" 1.3900 0.04348 241 173 42 26
1404 Okay, Okay, you win!! I'll ditch the new sombrero if you deep six those shoes! 1.3900 0.02769 241 175 52 14
1405 Thanks for breaking them in 1.3900 0.04060 241 166 56 19
1406 I’ve been seeing someone else 1.3900 0.04268 241 171 46 24
1407 If the hat stays, the shoes stay. 1.3893 0.04148 244 171 51 22
1408 That's only 5 1/2 feet. 1.3893 0.04573 244 182 29 33
1409 Ok now it’s your turn to walk a mile in my shoes.” 1.3893 0.04003 244 175 46 23
1410 I told the farrier to surprise me. 1.3893 0.03853 244 164 65 15
1411 I thought you said I needed new whores shoes. 1.3893 0.04268 244 174 45 25
1412 get out of there with that hat 1.3893 0.04518 244 183 28 33
1413 Why surprised? This can happens when you have to dress in the dark. 1.3891 0.04570 239 182 23 34
1414 What? Is there something in my teeth? 1.3891 0.04125 239 166 53 20
1415 Says the big hat. 1.3886 0.04813 193 138 35 20
1416 I thought horseshoes were supposed to prevent lameness. 1.3884 0.04469 242 180 31 31
1417 Just one letter off. I ordered horse shoes not house shoes! 1.3884 0.03917 242 173 48 21
1418 You got an endorsement deal? 1.3884 0.04212 242 171 48 23
1419 With the rodeo only a day away, Tom now regretted using a designer blacksmith. 1.3884 0.03917 242 164 62 16
1420 I know you want to express yourself. I just don't think Wyoming is the place to do it. 1.3884 0.04046 242 167 56 19
1421 Which one says unbridled Mustang? 1.3884 0.04046 242 167 56 19
1422 . “It’s complicated.” 1.3884 0.03961 242 168 57 17
1423 It behooves me to say, "Na-a-ay." 1.3882 0.03905 237 165 55 17
1424 They make me feel pretty. 1.3882 0.03882 237 159 64 14
1425 I'm just pony expressing myself. 1.3882 0.04149 237 165 52 20
1426 I like them, but if I'm honest, the pink pair make you look fat. 1.3882 0.04276 237 168 46 23
1427 In this pandemic I get so few chances to dress up. 1.3882 0.04062 237 163 56 18
1428 Well, if you can wear that hat... 1.3882 0.03973 237 161 60 16
1429 Yeah? And I don't like your hat. Get over it. 1.3882 0.03995 237 169 47 21
1430 It was Buy one pair get one free down at the corral night... 1.3882 0.04579 237 178 27 32
1431 Did you forget that the barn dance has been moved BACK a week? 1.3882 0.04599 237 176 30 31
1432 Is tonight an Elvis night or a Dorothy night? 1.3882 0.04192 237 168 47 22
1433 Okay fine, that was an emotional purchase 1.3882 0.04062 237 163 56 18
1434 I can finally tell my left from my right. 1.3882 0.04676 237 178 26 33
1435 I support your weight. Why can't you support my tap dancing? 1.3882 0.04062 237 163 56 18
1436 What goes with my saddle, green or pink? 1.3882 0.04500 237 176 31 30
1437 It's summer. 1.3882 0.04400 237 171 40 26
1438 It’s not my first rodeo, but it is my first endorsement deal. 1.3879 0.04262 214 150 47 17
1439 Yes, we are rejecting rigid shoes--and gendered categorizations. 1.3872 0.04706 235 177 25 33
1440 I know it's the thought that counts but . . . did you ever consider my difficulties dealing with laces? 1.3872 0.04508 235 172 35 28
1441 They were having a yard sale at Hopalong's. 1.3872 0.02978 235 173 46 16
1442 You first. 1.3872 0.04173 235 164 51 20
1443 Business up front, Party in back 1.3872 0.04344 235 168 43 24
1444 I know I’m not Hoss Cartwright but can’t I at least pretend to be? 1.3872 0.04744 235 178 23 34
1445 That’s not PPE 1.3872 0.04725 235 180 20 35
1446 You’re talking to a horse and only worried about the color of my shoes?! 1.3866 0.04048 238 164 56 18
1447 A horse can carry a man, but it’s the shoes that carry the horse. 1.3866 0.04344 238 171 42 25
1448 You'll need nice, new shoes, you said. It's a dressage competition, you said. 1.3865 0.04467 207 145 44 18
1449 So bite me, I happen to like pastels. 1.3863 0.03630 233 166 51 16
1450 Any shoes can be horse shoes. 1.3863 0.03681 233 152 72 9
1451 With a hat like that you have nerve making fun of my shoes 1.3863 0.04241 233 164 48 21
1452 They’re cute shoes. It’s a girl thing . 1.3863 0.04536 233 171 34 28
1453 I mean, really, how often do you look at a horse's shoes? 1.3863 0.04285 233 165 46 22
1454 I’ve got two pairs just like them back at the stable. 1.3863 0.04328 233 166 44 23
1455 What time is your wife back from playin' horseshoes? 1.3863 0.04153 233 162 52 19
1456 What did you do with your $1200? 1.3863 0.04370 233 167 42 24
1457 These shoes? I traded my old ones to some guys who wanted them for a silly game. 1.3853 0.04304 218 152 48 18
1458 Join my Onlyfans to see what's under these kicks. 1.3853 0.04606 231 171 31 29
1459 Am I the first gay horse you’ve owned? 1.3853 0.04266 231 163 47 21
1460 But I love the two-tone look. It even matches my kitchen! 1.3853 0.04544 231 172 30 29
1461 Cowboy Jack is wondering if this will change the sport of horseshoes forever. 1.3853 0.04727 231 174 25 32
1462 Love them! I can't wait to see what you got the pigs! 1.3853 0.04132 231 160 53 18
1463 I thought you said "whore's shoes." 1.3853 0.04266 231 163 47 21
1464 Sacré bleu; so Parisian farrier school was it...? 1.3853 0.03993 231 157 59 15
1465 What? You told me: ‘What’s mine is yours’. 1.3853 0.04266 231 165 44 22
1466 Well, I don't think you're in a position to be giving anyone fashion advice, Ike. 1.3846 0.04312 234 167 44 23
1467 The new blacksmith is from Paris, Texas. 1.3846 0.04269 234 166 46 22
1468 I got them on equine.com. 1.3846 0.04226 234 165 48 21
1469 I have not once mentioned your ridiculous hat. 1.3846 0.04344 208 144 48 16
1470 Now I'm the horse of two different colors. 1.3843 0.04110 229 158 54 17
1471 No more nails in THESE feet! 1.3843 0.04292 229 162 46 21
1472 So I guess you do wear shoe’s 1.3843 0.04676 229 171 28 30
1473 They told me I’d be a very stable animal, so here are my new balances. 1.3843 0.04510 229 167 36 26
1474 Now we need a matching feedbag 1.3843 0.04202 229 160 50 19
1475 I’m finally coming out of the stable, Tex. 1.3842 0.04748 190 135 37 18
1476 New shoes, you said. These will feel great, you said. Did you think I wasn't going to notice? 1.3840 0.04272 237 169 45 23
1477 They broke just by throwing them?!? 1.3836 0.04589 232 172 31 29
1478 With all the closed stores you managed to find some nice shoes Horsy! Impressive. 1.3836 0.04629 232 173 29 30
1479 Go with the green. They bring out the color in your eyes. 1.3836 0.04207 232 163 49 20
1480 Those colors just don't look right for some reason! 1.3836 0.04360 232 179 22 31
1481 Listen, one of us has to be the fashionable one. 1.3836 0.04317 232 168 40 24
1482 I hate when you rush me. 1.3836 0.04423 232 170 36 26
1483 Do these make me look fat? 1.3833 0.04363 227 162 43 22
1484 No one will notice on Zoom. 1.3833 0.04227 227 159 49 19
1485 I thought you said it was formal attire. 1.3833 0.04707 227 170 27 30
1486 I found them in the stable. Tell me what you think? 1.3833 0.04623 227 168 31 28
1487 My blacksmith? Sal Ferragamo. He's new around here. 1.3833 0.04363 227 162 43 22
1488 Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV. 1.3833 0.04110 227 159 50 18
1489 Okay, we need to rethink unsupervised online shopping 1.3833 0.04227 227 159 49 19
1490 You’re right, you should have gotten the pink mittens 1.3833 0.04623 227 173 23 31
1491 What ? I don't see a thing! 1.3833 0.04748 227 171 25 31
1492 It's a dude ranch, cowboy. 1.3833 0.04451 227 164 39 24
1493 Look, Gus-- I may be a horse with no name, but these really say "me". 1.3833 0.03940 227 153 61 13
1494 They sure look better on you than they did on my ex. 1.3833 0.03990 227 154 59 14
1495 We need to have a difficult conversation about the new stable boy. 1.3827 0.04752 196 141 35 20
1496 Oh yeah, Cowboy Snarky? Let's talk about your stupid hat. 1.3826 0.04001 230 157 58 15
1497 That's it. No more Amazon on the barn computer. 1.3826 0.04025 230 160 53 17
1498 Are these vintage Celine SP2018? 1.3826 0.04800 230 178 17 35
1499 Don't force me to wear a mask 1.3826 0.04819 230 176 20 34
1500 You're no dapper Dan yourself, so just hop on up and let's get ourselves over to that barnyard dance. 1.3822 0.04205 225 157 50 18
1501 Now, about this frumpy saddle ... 1.3822 0.04061 225 154 56 15
1502 Do these make me look like less of a stud? 1.3822 0.04158 225 156 52 17
1503 Brilliant! The sheriff will be looking for two men after we rob the bank. 1.3822 0.03861 225 150 64 11
1504 I see you've met the new blacksmith in town! 1.3822 0.03809 225 149 66 10
1505 Like my new Mare Horse Ones? 1.3822 0.04653 225 167 30 28
1506 The farrier thought it would make a fashion statement ! 1.3822 0.04738 225 169 26 30
1507 Did you know how ridiculous you look in that hat? 1.3822 0.04110 225 155 54 16
1508 We agreed on boots, not loafers. 1.3822 0.04696 225 168 28 29
1509 I decided I can't go on living a lie. 1.3822 0.04158 225 156 52 17
1510 I really wanted mules, but the shopkeeper said they weren’t me. 1.3822 0.04252 225 158 48 19
1511 Oh yeah? Well then let's talk about that stunning sombrero, Senor Nifty. 1.3822 0.04110 225 155 54 16
1512 A talking horse and it’s the shoes you think are unreal? 1.3822 0.04158 225 156 52 17
1513 And the blue ones were on sale. 1.3822 0.03704 225 159 54 12
1514 I said "you need new horse shoes" not jimmy choos. 1.3822 0.04479 225 163 38 24
1515 I bet you have 2 more pairs at home just like those. 1.3821 0.04283 212 147 49 16
1516 Definitely, the blue. 1.3812 0.04417 223 160 41 22
1517 What, like you've never seen horse shoes before? 1.3812 0.04085 223 153 55 15
1518 Dress for the job you want 1.3812 0.04134 223 154 53 16
1519 You call that a hat? 1.3812 0.04035 223 152 57 14
1520 I just had a taste of those mushrooms. Why do you ask? 1.3805 0.04047 226 157 53 16
1521 We both prefer mules. 1.3795 0.03655 224 161 48 15
1522 Gucci. I’m the Italian Stallion. 1.3791 0.04345 211 148 46 17
1523 Turns out it’s an even wilder east 1.3789 0.04128 227 158 52 17
1524 Don’t expect any fancy steps. I’ve got two left feet. 1.3788 0.04712 198 143 35 20
1525 One of us is a fashion train wreck and the other one is a horse. 1.3784 0.04192 222 155 50 17
1526 This. This is a horse shoe. 1.3784 0.04564 222 163 34 25
1527 We need to change to my dancing shoes 1.3784 0.04653 222 167 27 28
1528 Ok, but I'd bring some flip-flops in your bag for the reception. 1.3784 0.04192 222 155 50 17
1529 I know this isn’t your first rodeo, but it’s going to be your last! 1.3784 0.03915 222 160 47 15
1530 I want to hip-hop, not clip-clop. 1.3784 0.04288 222 157 46 19
1531 I’m just sick of the same old clippity-clop. 1.3784 0.04044 222 152 56 14
1532 I thought dress up was our special thing 1.3784 0.04192 222 155 50 17
1533 At least I'm not the one in that ridiculous hat! 1.3784 0.04428 222 160 40 22
1534 I love them, but now the saddle looks sort of outdated. 1.3784 0.04335 222 158 44 20
1535 I guess the blacksmith didn't have a complete set. 1.3784 0.04950 222 172 16 34
1536 I thought we were going out. 1.3784 0.04192 222 155 50 17
1537 What? You told me to dress comfortably. 1.3784 0.04192 222 155 50 17
1538 I'm undecided. 1.3778 0.03082 225 164 48 13
1539 This is not a dressage competition. 1.3778 0.04006 225 154 57 14
1540 I decided horseshoes were too common. 1.3773 0.04092 220 156 47 17
1541 Looks like the old gray mare she ain't what she used to be... 1.3773 0.04314 220 156 45 19
1542 What? They only had grey saddles left. 1.3773 0.04118 220 152 53 15
1543 I have an audition for “Equus, The Musical” later. 1.3773 0.04362 220 157 43 20
1544 Don't worry.... the other cowboys will be too busy laughing at your hat to notice.... 1.3773 0.04015 220 150 57 13
1545 Your kids asked to trade so they could play some sort of ring toss. 1.3773 0.04314 220 156 45 19
1546 Yes, TSA will still make you take them off 1.3773 0.04168 220 153 51 16
1547 Do the pink ones make my ass look fat? 1.3773 0.04266 220 155 47 18
1548 Sometimes you just need a little more arch support 1.3769 0.04296 199 137 49 13
1549 No, it does not beat four-of-kind. 1.3769 0.04527 199 141 41 17
1550 Hey, you be you. I’m just saying loafers might not be the best choice for speed and overall performance. 1.3767 0.04366 223 160 42 21
1551 I said 'non-binary.' Look it up. 1.3767 0.04029 223 153 56 14
1552 These are just my pumps. You should see me in heels 1.3767 0.04457 223 162 38 23
1553 Is this your idea of a gender reveal party? 1.3767 0.04177 223 156 50 17
1554 Mules were so last season. Check out these loafers. 1.3767 0.03770 223 162 44 17
1555 I reckon I should've guessed when the farrier drove up in a Tesla" 1.3767 0.04029 223 153 56 14
1556 I'm off to New York City to become a clothes horse 1.3767 0.04457 223 162 38 23
1557 If you can wear that hat....... 1.3767 0.03978 223 152 58 13
1558 Don't be finnicky now. I bought you a new set of shoes. 1.3767 0.04721 223 168 26 29
1559 I'm feeling hot to trot. 1.3767 0.04272 223 158 46 19
1560 Gender is a social construct, Dale. 1.3767 0.03876 223 150 62 11
1561 Yeah my regular guys ‘sbeen shuttered through this whole #covid thing 1.3767 0.04591 223 165 32 26
1562 Are we in a red or blue state? 1.3761 0.04193 218 152 50 16
1563 I know folks will talk . But admit it does add a soupcon of color in these here parts. 1.3761 0.03906 218 153 51 14
1564 'I went with the Mules.' 1.3761 0.04292 218 154 46 18
1565 Tell me your pronouns. 1.3761 0.04193 218 152 50 16
1566 They're no more ridiculous than that hat of yours! 1.3761 0.04341 218 155 44 19
1567 SO THAT'S THE NEW FASHION OF HORSESHOES" 1.3761 0.04804 218 165 24 29
1568 Huh. Well, while we're on the topic: just how many gallons of hat are "practical"? 1.3761 0.04065 218 152 51 15
1569 I have to take my hat off to you, shoes really do maketh the horse. 1.3761 0.04091 218 150 54 14
1570 The economy sure has taken a turn. I’m a horse. 1.3761 0.04891 218 167 20 31
1571 I couldn't decide which pair I liked better. So I got them both. 1.3756 0.04102 221 153 53 15
1572 One foot two foot red foot blue foot. 1.3750 0.04209 224 158 48 18
1573 It was then Bill realized he needed to address his horse's online shopping addiction 1.3750 0.04452 200 141 43 16
1574 You know they can’t see your shoes on Zoom right? 1.3750 0.04319 216 153 45 18
1575 Wasn’t sure which way Texas will go this November... 1.3750 0.04009 216 147 57 12
1576 It was then that Ted realized he’d have to be way more specific with the new farrier. 1.3750 0.04062 216 148 55 13
1577 Who says sensible shoes can't be fabulous 1.3750 0.04167 216 150 51 15
1578 Transgender horse 1.3744 0.04719 219 167 23 29
1579 They're more sensible than that hat. 1.3738 0.03921 214 144 60 10
1580 Imelda called. She wants her shoes back. 1.3738 0.04295 214 151 46 17
1581 It's not clip-clop, clip-clop anymore. It's tip-tap, tip-tap now. 1.3738 0.04244 214 150 48 16
1582 I’ve just been feeling like the west isn’t wild anymore and I thought this might help. 1.3738 0.04086 214 147 54 13
1583 These are ruby slippers and blue suede shoes. What's your hat? 1.3738 0.04244 214 150 48 16
1584 Well, you always said I was a horse of a different color. 1.3738 0.04032 214 146 56 12
1585 Come on, Todd - Lisa and I hired this horse outfit for the fancy dress party and all you could do was put on a HAT?? 1.3738 0.04346 214 152 44 18
1586 The shoes make the mane. 1.3738 0.04244 214 150 48 16
1587 Feels nice to finally dress up and get outside 1.3738 0.03921 214 144 60 10
1588 I have another identical two pairs back in my stable. 1.3737 0.04813 198 146 30 22
1589 I like to throw people off. 1.3737 0.04367 190 131 47 12
1590 They ran out of horseshoes. 1.3726 0.04573 212 155 35 22
1591 I think I still like the zebra heels we saw at the last place 1.3726 0.04217 212 148 49 15
1592 You got it wrong. The reds should be on your left hoofs and the greens on your right. 1.3726 0.04524 212 154 37 21
1593 You can wear those again after Labor Day 1.3726 0.02343 212 160 41 11
1594 Look, if you can accept the fact that I am a talking horse, it shouldn't be much of a stretch to believe I might want color-coordinated shoes." 1.3726 0.04322 212 150 45 17
1595 Your hat makes my shoes look funny. 1.3726 0.04424 212 152 41 19
1596 Relax, they're vegan leather 1.3726 0.04217 212 153 41 18
1597 It’s festive, I’ll give you that. 1.3726 0.04028 212 147 52 13
1598 Well it depends, is it a formal posse or more casual? 1.3726 0.04217 212 148 49 15
1599 Dress for the job you want,” they said 1.3726 0.04110 212 146 53 13
1600 I believed you when you said you could run in anything but I thought you meant mud or snow 1.3721 0.04477 215 156 38 21
1601 This should throw them off our trail. 1.3714 0.04401 210 150 42 18
1602 What’s with the weird hat? 1.3714 0.04297 210 148 46 16
1603 when you can't decide you buy them in both colors....... 1.3714 0.04189 210 146 50 14
1604 I couldn’t resist. Two pair for the price of one. 1.3714 0.04604 210 154 34 22
1605 I just hope it's not too matchy matchy. 1.3714 0.04023 210 143 56 11
1606 Is there a problem? 1.3714 0.03698 210 155 39 16
1607 It’s called fashion George... 1.3714 0.04453 210 151 40 19
1608 You know, we need to do something about your look. Hop on and I'll give you a ride over to see my stylist. That hat has got to go. 1.3714 0.04653 210 155 32 23
1609 So this is what it means to be all dressed up with nowhere to go, huh? 1.3714 0.04297 210 151 43 16
1610 If they aren't made of iron and nailed to my feet, I can't say I care what color they are. 1.3702 0.04103 208 143 53 12
1611 Your hat looks like my penis. 1.3702 0.04734 208 155 29 24
1612 Fine! You’re a “Carrie” 1.3702 0.04879 208 158 23 27
1613 So you’re telling me Dressage has nothing to do with how you dress? 1.3697 0.04384 211 151 42 18
1614 The Old West is dead. 1.3689 0.04185 206 143 50 13
1615 You got your hat. I got my shoes. 1.3689 0.04459 206 148 40 18
1616 Sorry, pal, when I'm wearing Manolo Blahniks you have to ride off into the sunset without me. 1.3689 0.04564 206 150 36 20
1617 They didn’t have the metal ones in my color. 1.3689 0.04241 206 144 48 14
1618 Relax, I used the stud fee. 1.3689 0.04185 206 143 50 13
1619 I am wearing them, so yes, technically they are. 1.3689 0.04297 206 145 46 15
1620 So is your hat, Doug. 1.3689 0.04667 206 152 32 22
1621 You're new here, aren't you? 1.3684 0.04143 209 145 51 13
1622 I told you I as unstable 1.3676 0.04488 204 147 39 18
1623 You wear that hat...I wear these shoes. 1.3676 0.04324 204 144 45 15
1624 Said he with the polka dot undies. 1.3676 0.04488 204 147 39 18
1625 The veterinarian says I’m making good progress in my transition. 1.3676 0.04065 204 142 50 12
1626 Which ones go better with my saddle? 1.3676 0.04324 204 144 45 15
1627 So when did you become the fashion sheriff? 1.3676 0.04542 204 148 37 19
1628 I AM READY FOR THE COONA VIRUS YOKO EICHEL,WOODLAND HILLS, CA 1.3676 0.05140 204 160 13 31
1629 You've been seeing that young mare again, have'nt you 1.3676 0.04379 204 145 43 16
1630 Texas is a swing state this year so I’m hedging my bets 1.3676 0.04488 204 147 39 18
1631 Sorry sir. No mask, no ride 1.3676 0.04488 204 147 39 18
1632 Just because it's work from home, doesn't mean I can't dress up! 1.3676 0.04324 204 146 42 16
1633 You’ve been watching Pimp My Ride again, haven’t you? 1.3676 0.04324 204 144 45 15
1634 It's 2020, don't act like you're surprised. 1.3676 0.04488 204 147 39 18
1635 Like everyone else, I have a full closet and nowhere to go 1.3676 0.04094 204 150 38 16
1636 I think the saleswoman took me for a ride 1.3676 0.04153 204 141 51 12
1637 I’m moving to Brooklyn, Dan 1.3676 0.04094 204 140 53 11
1638 They're orthopedic, ok? 1.3663 0.04626 202 148 34 20
1639 It looks like Biden's in front and Trump's behind. 1.3663 0.04518 202 146 38 18
1640 No, Sheriff. I have no idea where your shoes are. 1.3663 0.04119 202 149 36 17
1641 It’s called retail therapy, Bob. 💁🏻‍♀️ 1.3663 0.04731 202 150 30 22
1642 You’ve changed, Trigger. 1.3663 0.04237 202 141 48 13
1643 Horse, Shoes, Hat, Saddle, Man 1.3659 0.04362 205 146 43 16
1644 " Dang! They mistook 'horseshoes' for "house shoes". 1.3650 0.04493 200 144 39 17
1645 Yeah? Well, I don't like your hat either. 1.3650 0.04264 200 140 47 13
1646 Really? Open-toed shoes. That's sagebrush out there. 1.3650 0.04234 200 142 44 14
1647 Before you say something, these are Manolos and not knock-offs. 1.3650 0.04234 200 145 40 15
1648 Jealous, cowboy? 1.3650 0.04021 200 138 52 10
1649 My hooves my choice 1.3650 0.04234 200 142 44 14
1650 That was a pretty damned discouraging word. 1.3650 0.04264 200 140 47 13
1651 The blue ones 'clip' and the red ones 'clop'. 1.3650 0.04712 200 148 31 21
1652 You're wondering about the shoes, admit it. 1.3650 0.04322 200 141 45 14
1653 What? Do I have something stuck in my teeth? 1.3650 0.04322 200 141 45 14
1654 There's a shoe store charge on my credit card bill. Know anything about it? 1.3650 0.04322 200 141 45 14
1655 I know what you're thinking... I look ridiculous wearing this saddle. 1.3650 0.04322 200 141 45 14
1656 What? You think they would look better with socks? 1.3650 0.04204 200 139 49 12
1657 Trust me. If I just click my hind legs, we'll be back home in Kansas. 1.3650 0.04322 200 141 45 14
1658 What I do in my own time is my own business 1.3650 0.04380 200 142 43 15
1659 Big date tonight? 1.3650 0.03894 200 144 44 12
1660 I tell you Lawrence, it’s the first thing the chicks notice 1.3650 0.04380 200 142 43 15
1661 These gender reveals are really getting out of hand 1.3650 0.04264 200 140 47 13
1662 I’ve got plans. 1.3650 0.04322 200 141 45 14
1663 Well, I think your hat looks ridiculous 1.3650 0.04380 200 142 43 15
1664 You change your hat I'll change my shoes😂. 1.3650 0.04493 200 144 39 17
1665 Saddle up hombre, we're going dancing. 1.3645 0.04277 203 143 46 14
1666 You can't walk into a bar wearing those. 1.3645 0.04277 203 148 38 17
1667 Manolo Blahnik, Jimmy Choo, I can't make up my mind..... 1.3645 0.03858 203 148 41 14
1668 ...and my pronouns are They/Them. 1.3636 0.04580 198 144 36 18
1669 No, they don't make you ankles look fat. 1.3636 0.02471 198 150 39 9
1670 80s night at the rodeo again? 1.3636 0.04231 198 138 48 12
1671 I gotta be me. 1.3636 0.04108 198 136 52 10
1672 I remember some loco weed. Then a cute pony said, " let's paint your toenails," and then I woke up like this. 1.3636 0.04495 198 145 35 18
1673 You told me that to really understand you, I should walk a mile in your shoes. 1.3636 0.04231 198 138 48 12
1674 It ain't about political parties, Tex, and it ain't about gender ambivalence. It's about somebody not knowing how to shoe a horse. 1.3636 0.04409 198 141 42 15
1675 You, look silly in that hat.. 1.3636 0.04467 198 142 40 16
1676 What's your excuse for not having a mask 1.3636 0.04321 198 145 37 16
1677 The hat's a little much, don't you think? 1.3636 0.04467 198 142 40 16
1678 I’m very sorry, Silver, but the Governor says we must socially distance. 1.3636 0.04745 198 147 30 21
1679 Don't ask, Don't tell. 1.3636 0.03645 198 142 46 10
1680 They're different colors so I know which ones to rotate. 1.3636 0.04231 198 138 48 12
1681 I said horseshoes. Those are cross trainers 1.3636 0.04350 198 142 41 15
1682 As soon as you remove that ridiculous hat. 1.3636 0.04231 198 138 48 12
1683 In my defense, they were the only four they had in my size. 1.3636 0.04350 198 140 44 14
1684 I get it. You heard me say I was putting you out to stud, and you think it's party time. 1.3636 0.04524 198 143 38 17
1685 It was BOGO so I figured, "Why not?" 1.3636 0.04636 198 145 34 19
1686 Well, of course you have to break them in first. 1.3636 0.03274 198 147 40 11
1687 Yea......Should have gone with the boots. 1.3636 0.04108 198 136 52 10
1688 Tim, I think we should talk about toxic masculinity. 1.3636 0.04108 198 136 52 10
1689 I’m nonpartisan. 1.3636 0.04350 198 140 44 14
1690 It shouldn't be difficult for you to wrap your head around gender fluidity Jack! 1.3636 0.02901 198 147 41 10
1691 Yeah sure, but first you lose the hat. 1.3636 0.04467 198 142 40 16
1692 You've been seeing that Parisian blacksmith again, haven't you? 1.3632 0.04362 201 143 43 15
1693 Have you been using my Amazon account, again?" 1.3632 0.04530 201 146 37 18
1694 Don't tell me. This is your first rodeo. 1.3632 0.04305 201 142 45 14
1695 Listen Bill, in all our years I never mentioned the hat. You’re going to need to give me this 1.3632 0.04305 201 142 45 14
1696 Yes, I've been seeing someone else. How did you know? 1.3627 0.04145 204 142 50 12
1697 It’s called fashion, Walker. Look it up. 1.3627 0.04481 204 148 38 18
1698 Well, come on, Joe, I don't think rhinestone cowboys should have all the fun. 1.3627 0.04260 204 144 46 14
1699 I didn't say whores' shoes, Buck! 1.3622 0.04612 196 143 35 18
1700 With a long sigh, Hank whispered to himself, "Well, horses actually are red-green colorblind." 1.3622 0.04497 196 141 39 16
1701 No really, they actually make you faster. 1.3622 0.04319 196 138 45 13
1702 What do you mean they don't match? I was lucky to find ANY shoes in your size! 1.3622 0.04438 196 140 41 15
1703 It’s for the gender reveal party. They’re having twins. 1.3622 0.04258 196 137 47 12
1704 They were buy one pair get one free. 1.3622 0.04438 196 140 41 15
1705 Why don’t you ever wear the heels I bought you for your birthday? 1.3622 0.04497 196 141 39 16
1706 Oh God, I can't feel my toes! 1.3622 0.04497 196 141 39 16
1707 These shoes were made for walkin', Ted. 1.3618 0.04332 199 141 44 14
1708 You like them? I got them on Rodeo Drive. 1.3618 0.04390 199 142 42 15
1709 Do these shoes make me look fat? 1.3618 0.04390 199 142 42 15
1710 Come on, you promised...and I’m wearing my dancing shoes. 1.3618 0.04332 199 141 44 14
1711 You know, I think you should have chosen the saddle shoes. 1.3618 0.04153 199 138 50 11
1712 Let's see them call me a dark horse now. 1.3618 0.04273 199 140 46 13
1713 I haven’t seen my feet in years. 1.3618 0.04561 199 145 36 18
1714 You didn't check the mirror before you left the stable, did you? 1.3618 0.04670 199 147 32 20
1715 Technically, that’s salsa. The trot is red, red blue, blue. 1.3618 0.04505 199 144 38 17
1716 I never asked why your hat is so large. 1.3618 0.04361 199 144 39 16
1717 The lumbar support in horseshoes is terrible 1.3618 0.04505 199 144 38 17
1718 Because the high heels were killing me, that's why. 1.3618 0.04390 199 142 42 15
1719 So you think Texas is a swing state too? 1.3618 0.04505 199 144 38 17
1720 I was hoping for a kitten heel but the smithy said they'd exasperate my charley horse. 1.3618 0.04390 199 142 42 15
1721 Would it kill you to change out of your work clothes on date night? 1.3618 0.04213 199 139 48 12
1722 One day every horse will be wearing shoes and we’ll be rich. 1.3618 0.04213 199 139 48 12
1723 I didn’t know they were yours. 1.3614 0.04229 202 144 44 14
1724 This always happens when you order shoes online. 1.3614 0.04344 202 146 40 16
1725 That's what happens when you order online. 1.3614 0.04511 202 147 37 18
1726 I borrowed them from your girlfriend when you said I needed some whore's shoes. 1.3608 0.04586 194 141 36 17
1727 I heard the blacksmiths had go through diversity training 1.3608 0.04868 194 146 26 22
1728 Seriously, how often do you really look at a man's shoes? 1.3608 0.04701 194 143 32 19
1729 Neither one. I like the stilettos better. 1.3608 0.04316 194 139 41 14
1730 I didn’t hear you come home last night. 1.3608 0.04158 194 134 50 10
1731 I found the shoes at the bridle shop. 1.3608 0.04061 194 140 41 13
1732 I think the expression is “Horse of a Different Color”, not “Horse Shoes of a Different Color.” 1.3608 0.04644 194 142 34 18
1733 Sure, they're comfortable. But that's not the point now, is it? 1.3608 0.04527 194 140 38 16
1734 So sue me for trying to spice up the relationship a bit. 1.3608 0.04408 194 138 42 14
1735 They didn't have any in purple. 1.3608 0.04158 194 134 50 10
1736 These don’t even f*cking match, Dale. 1.3604 0.04301 197 139 45 13
1737 Mules. I should have gotten mules. 1.3600 0.04541 200 146 36 18
1738 You would tell me if I looked ridiculous, right? 1.3600 0.04314 200 142 44 14
1739 they were out of brown....... 1.3596 0.04492 203 148 37 18
1740 I need a new saddle. 1.3596 0.04212 203 143 47 13
1741 You don’t say a word about my horse slippers and I will forgo all my jokes regarding the short cowboy with the ridiculous hat taller than he is. 1.3594 0.04588 192 142 32 18
1742 You specifically said, ‘Let’s play a game of horseshoes,’ 1.3594 0.04118 192 132 51 9
1743 You forgot your socks. 1.3594 0.04558 192 139 37 16
1744 Funny story, actually—turns out, my front hooves are slightly bigger than my hind hooves. 1.3594 0.04498 192 138 39 15
1745 All you needed was a mask. 1.3594 0.04848 192 144 27 21
1746 Did you have too much pizzaz for your posse too? 1.3594 0.04558 192 139 37 16
1747 I'm gonna need an Italian saddle now. 1.3590 0.04808 156 110 36 10
1748 You're probably wondering, why not boots? 1.3590 0.04141 195 135 50 10
1749 Which pair goes best with my saddle? 1.3590 0.04141 195 140 42 13
1750 At least you’re not wearing the crocs anymore... 1.3590 0.04109 195 137 47 11
1751 Don't judge me. 1.3579 0.04404 190 135 42 13
1752 Is that what you're going to wear? 1.3579 0.04710 190 140 32 18
1753 Oh, these? 1.3579 0.04211 190 132 48 10
1754 If this is a gender reveal, I’m confused. 1.3579 0.04651 190 139 34 17
1755 No offense, but the hat screams 'Napoleon complex'. 1.3579 0.04404 190 135 42 13
1756 Does my saddle look too tight? 1.3579 0.04341 190 134 44 12
1757 Red is for port. Green is for starboard. Go back and try again. 1.3579 0.04590 190 138 36 16
1758 I told you there was no hoof support in those, but no, you had to have them 1.3579 0.04276 190 133 46 11
1759 Have You Been in my Closet? 1.3579 0.04467 190 136 40 14
1760 Trigger, the red shoes are darling. The green ones, meh. 1.3579 0.04144 190 133 47 10
1761 horse shoes?.... I thought you said house shoes. 1.3579 0.04769 190 141 30 19
1762 While you may be an Old Cowhand from the Rio Grande, I'm a Prancing Stallion from Manhattan. So there!" 1.3579 0.04467 190 136 40 14
1763 I'm a horse of different colors. 1.3579 0.04211 190 132 48 10
1764 Step one: THINK like a triple crown winner! 1.3575 0.03804 179 135 32 12
1765 Business in the front, rodeo in the back. 1.3575 0.04231 193 140 39 14
1766 Would You want to wear steel shoes? 1.3575 0.04418 193 138 41 14
1767 Actually, I'm a horse of two different colors! 1.3575 0.04656 193 142 33 18
1768 Think we ordered from the same catalog! 1.3575 0.04882 193 146 25 22
1769 You really don't think they make my butt look big? 1.3575 0.04656 193 142 33 18
1770 I just needed to feel like a filly again, you know? 1.3571 0.04124 196 136 50 10
1771 The virus stole my sense of taste 1.3564 0.04498 188 135 39 14
1772 That’s when it occurred to Barton that he’d forgotten one crucial word in his online search for horseshoes. 1.3564 0.04370 188 133 43 12
1773 They were out of horseshoes 1.3564 0.04370 188 133 43 12
1774 I just hope my wife doesn't see us. 1.3564 0.04370 188 133 43 12
1775 I know they’re yours, and I’ll take them off when you start wearing a mask. 1.3564 0.04237 188 138 36 14
1776 I couldn't decide so I bought both. 1.3560 0.04126 191 132 50 9
1777 Well sure, but you didn’t say WHERE the different color had to be. 1.3560 0.04747 191 142 30 19
1778 You didn't specify which type of horseshoe, Pete. 1.3560 0.04258 191 134 46 11
1779 What? They came in his & hers 1.3560 0.04862 191 144 26 21
1780 Because iron is, like, sooooo last century! 1.3557 0.04338 194 138 43 13
1781 Horses are dichromatic, not colorblind pardner. 1.3557 0.03205 194 144 41 9
1782 I know, I know...drunk shopping online again. 1.3550 0.04188 200 141 47 12
1783 We are NOT getting a saddle to match your shoes! 1.3550 0.04306 200 143 43 14
1784 They’re Mare Jordans 1.3548 0.04196 186 129 48 9
1785 No, I have never heard of a "gender-reveal" promenade. 1.3548 0.04593 186 135 36 15
1786 Have you been reading Doctor Seuss again? 1.3548 0.04593 186 135 36 15
1787 Who said you could wear open-toed shoes? 1.3548 0.04718 186 137 32 17
1788 You're wearing a penis on your head and you're criticizing my look? 1.3548 0.04656 186 136 34 16
1789 What do you mean you identify as non-binary? 1.3548 0.04464 186 133 40 13
1790 I you are wearing that hat then I am wearing these shoes 1.3548 0.04656 186 136 34 16
1791 You have your hat. I have my shoes. 1.3548 0.04332 186 131 44 11
1792 This way we’ll cover our tracks . 1.3548 0.04464 186 133 40 13
1793 Despite my best efforts, I still feel like I have two left feet. 1.3548 0.04399 186 132 42 12
1794 You’ll have to show me what’s under that hat first. 1.3545 0.03907 189 135 44 10
1795 Trigger? I told you that you can't be both a Republican and a Democrat! 1.3545 0.04723 189 140 31 18
1796 You'll never guess what they're out of. 1.3545 0.04219 189 132 47 10
1797 You're not the only one that gets bored. 1.3545 0.04083 189 130 51 8
1798 I’d say the front pair is a little bit Country and the back a little bit Rock ‘N Roll. 1.3545 0.04350 189 134 43 12
1799 This must be your first rodeo....? 1.3545 0.04602 189 138 35 16
1800 I love shoes and I love shopping. So shoot me. 1.3545 0.04350 189 134 43 12
1801 It's 2020 Dale. Hop on or back off. 1.3545 0.04540 189 137 37 15
1802 The only reason you’re still taller than me is because you’re in heels 1.3545 0.04840 189 142 27 20
1803 I see you've been to the Shoe Barn 1.3545 0.04350 189 134 43 12
1804 I would go with the designer pair. 1.3545 0.04350 189 136 40 13
1805 Stand behind me and say that again. 1.3545 0.04540 189 137 37 15
1806 Too wild? 1.3545 0.04350 189 134 43 12
1807 Should I go with the satin or velvet saddle? 1.3545 0.04415 189 135 41 13
1808 My pronouns are they, them. 1.3545 0.04540 189 137 37 15
1809 Why the long hat, Fred? 1.3545 0.04602 189 138 35 16
1810 No big deal, I'm colorblind. 1.3545 0.04219 189 132 47 10
1811 I know they aren’t practical, but I got a terrific deal. 1.3545 0.04252 189 140 34 15
1812 As a Texan, I'm undecided in 2020. 1.3545 0.04415 189 135 41 13
1813 Well--more practical than the high heals 1.3545 0.02003 189 139 46 4
1814 I’m leaving you to pursue my career in tap dancing 1.3545 0.04350 189 136 40 13
1815 I guess that’s why you don’t name a horse Imelda 1.3545 0.04540 189 137 37 15
1816 When Jimmy woke up he realised that maybe he did not have that drunken threesome after all. 1.3545 0.04540 189 137 37 15
1817 Hey cowboy, my eyes are up here! 1.3542 0.04366 192 137 42 13
1818 Like my mules? 1.3538 0.04440 195 141 39 15
1819 Oh, says the guy with no girlfriend and leather chaps. 1.3533 0.04429 184 131 41 12
1820 I guess the new smith, didn't know if you were a mare or a gelding? 1.3532 0.04782 201 153 25 23
1821 Hey man, I don’t see color. 1.3532 0.04569 201 149 33 19
1822 You didn't like the flip-flops either. 1.3529 0.04572 187 136 36 15
1823 When the other ‘boys said you were “all hat, no cattle,” they didn’t know the half of it. 1.3529 0.04444 187 134 40 13
1824 Damn autocorrect! I meant galloping around town, NOT galavanting around town 1.3529 0.04280 187 134 41 12
1825 They're my dancing shoes. 1.3526 0.04395 190 136 41 13
1826 Which go best with my saddle -- the pink or the green? 1.3526 0.04168 190 135 44 11
1827 What? You said I needed new shoes. 1.3526 0.04331 190 135 43 12
1828 You're the one who had me gelded,so cut me a little slack here. 1.3526 0.04267 190 134 45 11
1829 They're supposed to increase horsepower by 5 percent. 1.3526 0.04458 190 137 39 14
1830 ... and now I can't get them off 1.3526 0.04581 190 139 35 16
1831 « I thought the bowling lanes let you keep them, no horsing around!» 1.3526 0.04581 190 139 35 16
1832 It's called fashion, Steve. 1.3523 0.04409 193 139 40 14
1833 It does hide the bald spot. 1.3523 0.04222 193 136 46 11
1834 Lovely, but you couldn’t find your saddle shoes? 1.3523 0.04470 193 140 38 15
1835 Metal is soo yesterday. 1.3523 0.04285 193 137 44 12
1836 Well, I don't like your hat. 1.3516 0.04850 182 136 28 18
1837 We'll need to rotate them every thousand miles or so. 1.3516 0.04526 182 131 38 13
1838 If you tell me where you bought your hat I’ll tell you where I bought my shoes. 1.3516 0.04526 182 131 38 13
1839 No Roy, I didn't say "whore's shoes." 1.3516 0.04723 182 134 32 16
1840 What name did they say again, Dorothy or Elvis? 1.3516 0.04974 182 138 24 20
1841 Blacksmith's working from home. 1.3516 0.04390 182 129 42 11
1842 Oh, yeah? Well I think your hat looks stupid. 1.3516 0.04250 182 127 46 9
1843 Lose the hat first, then we can talk. 1.3516 0.04593 182 132 36 14
1844 Yeah, I know. A talking horse. 1.3516 0.03141 182 137 36 9
1845 What, do I have something in my teeth? 1.3516 0.04390 182 129 42 11
1846 Elvis a coming and Judy Garland a going. 1.3516 0.04723 182 134 32 16
1847 You're really gonna judge me with that hat on? 1.3516 0.04659 182 133 34 15
1848 Am I too hot to trot? 1.3516 0.04787 182 135 30 17
1849 Everything isn't always black and white, partner. 1.3515 0.04924 165 121 30 14
1850 Now that I gave you those horseshoes you wanted, you expect me to carry you? 1.3500 0.05012 180 137 23 20
1851 Well if you must know, my mother was part Lipizzaner. What’s your excuse for the hat? 1.3500 0.04277 180 126 45 9
1852 Ever have one of those days when you just can't make up your mind? 1.3500 0.04054 180 123 51 6
1853 I’m a horseshoe influencer. 1.3500 0.04626 180 131 35 14
1854 I guess you heard they are shooting this western in technicolor? 1.3500 0.04130 180 134 34 12
1855 Bad news. The dancing bear got the job. 1.3497 0.04637 183 134 34 15
1856 Look, you can lead me to water, but I’ll make sure I look damn good getting there! 1.3497 0.04506 183 132 38 13
1857 Okay, now you go walk a mile in my shoes. 1.3483 0.04451 178 127 40 11
1858 These are horseshoes version 2.0 1.3483 0.04660 178 135 26 17
1859 Sockless too - on point buddy. 1.3483 0.04521 178 128 38 12
1860 Hopefully this draws attention away from the fact that you can talk. 1.3483 0.04925 178 134 26 18
1861 My blacksmith was a bit of a shoe freak. What's your excuse for the hat? 1.3483 0.04794 178 132 30 16
1862 Well, the blue pair bring out your eyes, but the pink pair go with your giant erection 1.3483 0.04625 178 134 28 16
1863 You said we were going out tonight. 1.3483 0.03669 178 127 44 7
1864 Oh! But the hat IS au courant? 1.3483 0.04521 178 128 38 12
1865 Of course they’re expensive and uncomfortable, they’re Jimmy Horse-Choos. . 1.3483 0.04727 178 131 32 15
1866 Take them off before you come in the house. 1.3466 0.04103 176 121 49 6
1867 Well, you said I needed new shoes. 1.3466 0.04334 176 124 43 9
1868 The red ones.” 1.3466 0.04624 176 128 35 13
1869 Seriously? Now you tell me? Had I known we were walking, I would have never worn these shoes. 1.3464 0.04569 179 130 36 13
1870 I’m tired of them taking my damn shoes! Let’s see them play horseshoes with these. 1.3464 0.04430 179 128 40 11
1871 Home on the range...where perhaps more discouraging words should be heard. 1.3457 0.04406 162 113 42 7
1872 Don't judge me. They were buy one, get one free. 1.3457 0.05130 162 122 24 16
1873 I'm a horse, these are shoes. Doesn't get simpler than that. 1.3455 0.04439 165 116 41 8
1874 Are we going to have a problem with this? 1.3455 0.04602 165 118 37 10
1875 So, this must be your first rodeo. 1.3448 0.04513 174 125 38 11
1876 Somebody pitched the old ones. 1.3448 0.04867 174 130 28 16
1877 Do you think the red ones make my haunches look big? 1.3448 0.04513 174 130 30 14
1878 It was Amazon Prime day 1.3448 0.04658 174 127 34 13
1879 Do these colors wash me out? 1.3448 0.04363 174 130 33 11
1880 This wasn't what I had in mind when I gave you money to go get shoed. 1.3448 0.04658 174 127 34 13
1881 I got tired of TSA frisking me every time I went through a metal detector.. 1.3448 0.04513 174 125 38 11
1882 The blacksmith was closed. 1.3448 0.04513 174 125 38 11
1883 I have a date later. 1.3448 0.04325 174 130 31 13
1884 Do these red shoes make my ass look big? 1.3448 0.04729 174 128 32 14
1885 No, those shoes don't make you look fat. 1.3448 0.04586 174 126 36 12
1886 They said the green ones were better for “clipping” and the red ones better for “clopping” 1.3448 0.04729 174 128 32 14
1887 New shoes,Bob? 1.3448 0.04729 174 128 32 14
1888 I just need to know, is there an end game? 1.3448 0.04798 174 129 30 15
1889 Are these too gay? 1.3448 0.04867 174 130 28 16
1890 Alex... Peggy... Your costume is seamless... 1.3448 0.04658 174 127 34 13
1891 In hindsight... well I don’t have hindsight 1.3448 0.04439 174 124 40 10
1892 So what you’re saying is you want me to tap my front hoof if it’s a boy? And my back hoof if it’s a girl? 1.3448 0.04363 174 128 34 12
1893 Didn’t they say it was a fancy-dress posse? 1.3448 0.05002 174 132 24 18
1894 I’m wearing them because I’M the one doing all of the walking, Jim! 1.3448 0.04798 174 129 30 15
1895 It’s who I am 1.3448 0.04513 174 125 38 11
1896 Listen Eric, my wife's gonna be home any minute now. So if you don't put everything back, she's gonna think somethings up. 1.3448 0.04550 174 128 33 13
1897 And I suppose you'll be wanting new saddlebags now too! 1.3448 0.04586 174 126 36 12
1898 Sure. As long as you feel well supported. 1.3448 0.02661 174 130 38 6
1899 The constant clippety-clop was driving me crazy. 1.3436 0.04717 163 118 34 11
1900 Let's just say my two previous riders won't be needin' these anymore. 1.3430 0.04835 172 128 29 15
1901 I’m gay. I’m your gay horse. Deal with it. 1.3430 0.04692 172 126 33 13
1902 So my dressage lesson isn't today? 1.3430 0.04692 172 126 33 13
1903 We're not going anywhere so why can't I wear my house shoes? 1.3430 0.04470 172 123 39 10
1904 The blacksmith was closed, so I went to Lady Foot Locker. 1.3430 0.04692 172 126 33 13
1905 Don't you step on my blue suede shoes, or you'll be seein' the red ones 1.3430 0.04692 172 126 33 13
1906 Why aren’t you wearing socks? 1.3430 0.04470 172 123 39 10
1907 Do these shoes make my butt look big? 1.3430 0.04619 172 125 35 12
1908 I like your hat, Steve. 1.3430 0.04545 172 124 37 11
1909 The horseshoe selection was great, but these were half off. 1.3430 0.04393 172 122 41 9
1910 Yes, a horse divided against itself can, in fact, stand 1.3430 0.04905 172 129 27 16
1911 I love a BOGO 1.3430 0.05042 172 131 23 18
1912 Just try the sequinned vest I got you. 1.3430 0.04393 172 122 41 9
1913 Sure, they look great, but the heels are killing me. 1.3430 0.04545 172 124 37 11
1914 The blacksmith thought I said “whore shoes”. 1.3430 0.04974 172 130 25 17
1915 I couldn’t decide so I bought both colors. 1.3430 0.04545 172 124 37 11
1916 I finally found a ferrier who carries Ferragamos. 1.3430 0.04545 172 124 37 11
1917 Do you ever feel like you just don’t fit in—no matter where you go or what you do? 1.3430 0.04692 172 126 33 13
1918 Fine. I’ll take back the Ferragamos but I’m keeping the Jimmy Choos. 1.3430 0.04619 172 125 35 12
1919 Cliff! This is a DUDE ranch! 1.3430 0.04470 172 123 39 10
1920 You're drunk Harold. Go home 1.3430 0.04315 172 121 43 8
1921 They are the new Mare Jordans. 1.3430 0.04764 172 127 31 14
1922 Nope, I don't think they make you look fat." 1.3429 0.04267 175 135 25 15
1923 But without them my feet hurt 1.3429 0.05043 175 134 22 19
1924 OK, I'll change my hat if you promise to take me into town. 1.3429 0.04029 175 129 36 10
1925 Do you think plaid or paisley for my saddle? 1.3429 0.04418 175 125 40 10
1926 I was hoping for some matching saddle shoes. 1.3429 0.04343 175 124 42 9
1927 What? I'm trying to be more bipartisan. 1.3429 0.04635 175 128 34 13
1928 Let's dance. 1.3429 0.04267 175 123 44 8
1929 These are so uncomfortable I’d rather have nails driven into my hoofs 1.3429 0.04564 175 127 36 12
1930 This is the last time I go to the bar with you. 1.3429 0.04564 175 127 36 12
1931 I don’t mention your hat, why you mention my shoes? 1.3429 0.04492 175 126 38 11
1932 I don't know how you walk in these things! 1.3412 0.04653 170 124 34 12
1933 I've let you rein me in for too long, Greg. 1.3412 0.04578 170 123 36 11
1934 I'm guessing this must be a dude ranch. 1.3412 0.04344 170 123 38 9
1935 Well Scout, let's head home. Remember , what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. 1.3412 0.04653 170 124 34 12
1936 Too matchy-matchy-matchy-matchy? 1.3412 0.04728 170 125 32 13
1937 The lady blacksmith had new ideas. 1.3412 0.04653 170 124 34 12
1938 I’ll be darned. They really are one size fits all! 1.3412 0.04578 170 123 36 11
1939 But, this IS the real me, Gary. . 1.3412 0.04344 170 120 42 8
1940 Look, Ted, I’m just saying it’s high time we horses reclaim the whole ‘of a different color’ thing. 1.3412 0.03787 170 128 32 10
1941 I don’t care if they’re comfortable.... they’re not practical... 1.3412 0.04462 170 124 35 11
1942 True, 2 pair beat a pair. 1.3410 0.04523 173 125 37 11
1943 Ferragamo's ? Really ? 1.3410 0.04949 173 131 25 17
1944 HORSE SHOES! Jack-ass. I said "HORSE SHOES!" 1.3410 0.04881 173 130 27 16
1945 I swear I’ll never touch corn liquor agin 1.3410 0.04255 173 124 40 9
1946 Nice, huh? I have two pair just like them back at the stable. 1.3410 0.03661 173 131 32 10
1947 I suppose next you'll be wanting a surry with the fringe on top. 1.3410 0.04255 173 124 40 9
1948 Sorry, I woke up late and had to get ready in the dark. 1.3410 0.04448 173 124 39 10
1949 I’m definitely going to need orthotics. 1.3410 0.04523 173 125 37 11
1950 They say you need to walk in a persons shoes to really understand them. 1.3410 0.04523 173 125 37 11
1951 What do you think? Blue for lazy days around the barn. Red for nights out on the range. 1.3410 0.04295 173 122 43 8
1952 Metal shoes are so passe, Billy." 1.3410 0.04448 173 127 36 10
1953 I’ve found a new farrier. 1.3410 0.04949 173 131 25 17
1954 The metal ones were killing me. 1.3410 0.04372 173 123 41 9
1955 Who cares, Slim? No one can see my feet during this ridiculous ZOOM MEETING RODEO anyway... 1.3410 0.04597 173 126 35 12
1956 Can you tie them for me? 1.3409 0.04470 176 127 38 11
1957 We were playing horseshoes 1.3400 0.04990 150 110 29 11
1958 Which ones bring out my eyes? 1.3396 0.04873 159 117 30 12
1959 I decided to treat myself. 1.3393 0.04688 168 123 33 12
1960 With some venture capital funding, I can really disrupt the horseshoe industry. 1.3393 0.04414 168 122 36 10
1961 You seriously didn't think I was going to wear heels on the trail, did you Earl? 1.3393 0.04373 168 119 41 8
1962 Well, if you can wear that silly thing... 1.3393 0.05124 168 129 21 18
1963 I see you’ve been shopping on the internet again. 1.3393 0.04373 168 119 41 8
1964 Sam, next time you Google, it's spelled "farrier" 1.3393 0.04373 168 119 41 8
1965 Yes, I'm now a horse of a different color. 1.3393 0.04688 168 123 33 12
1966 Which ones say, "yipee ki yay?" 1.3393 0.03945 168 119 43 6
1967 Why yes, I am a Gift Horse! So why are you looking me in the face? 1.3393 0.04533 168 121 37 10
1968 I wasn't sure what you were wearing. 1.3393 0.04122 168 116 47 5
1969 I am never going to that blacksmith again. 1.3393 0.04332 168 121 38 9
1970 Maybe you should walk a mile in mine now. 1.3392 0.04323 171 121 42 8
1971 I prefer "they," "them" and "their." 1.3385 0.05300 130 95 26 9
1972 What? You told me "If only you were in my shoes"! 1.3376 0.04913 157 116 29 12
1973 You look like a horse’s ass in that hat! 1.3373 0.04723 166 122 32 12
1974 I got dressed in the dark this morning 1.3373 0.04645 166 121 34 11
1975 I’m just horsin’ around. 1.3373 0.04566 166 122 33 11
1976 Sorry, I can't go cattle rustling with my Gucci's... 1.3373 0.04723 166 122 32 12
1977 Turns out you nail about anything to a hoof and call it a shoe. 1.3373 0.04403 166 118 40 8
1978 I just had my Hoofs done... 1.3373 0.04723 166 127 24 15
1979 The matching saddlebag will be a challenge. 1.3373 0.04486 166 119 38 9
1980 Don’t worry, they won’t see them on Zoom! 1.3373 0.04403 166 118 40 8
1981 And all these years I thought you were coloredblind! 1.3373 0.04645 166 121 34 11
1982 I won them playing horseshoes. 1.3373 0.04234 166 118 41 7
1983 You know, I didn't say anything when you tried culottes. 1.3373 0.04320 166 117 42 7
1984 So you couldn’t take the time to find a coordinating saddle? 1.3373 0.04486 166 119 38 9
1985 It was a BOGO, Hank 1.3373 0.04723 166 122 32 12
1986 And my preferred pronouns are they/them. 1.3373 0.04277 166 121 36 9
1987 I'm sorry Bill I just don't see why we would waste a good nail, these fit just fine. 1.3373 0.04277 166 119 39 8
1988 Frank, I’ve logged you out of our Prime account. It’s for your own good. 1.3373 0.04566 166 120 36 10
1989 Well...you’re not even a real cowboy 1.3373 0.04950 166 125 26 15
1990 Why the long face, Harold? Didn’t get to the Nordstrom’s sale in time? 1.3373 0.04645 166 121 34 11
1991 You always have to show me up, don't you? 1.3373 0.04432 169 121 39 9
1992 Is it too much? 1.3373 0.04432 169 121 39 9
1993 The humiliation you’ll get used to. The hard part’s gonna be breakin’ them in. 1.3373 0.04352 169 120 41 8
1994 Stop pouting. I promise I won't stretch 'em out. 1.3373 0.04352 169 120 41 8
1995 Where do you get off saying I look stupid in this hat? 1.3354 0.05351 164 129 15 20
1996 No, it’s not a phallic symbol and I’m not trying to outshine you. 1.3354 0.05137 164 126 21 17
1997 At least you didn't wear socks. 1.3354 0.05137 164 126 21 17
1998 A different color indeed. 1.3354 0.04476 164 122 31 11
1999 They were out of the black ones 1.3354 0.04680 164 120 33 11
2000 Is that a ten gallon hat or are you just happy to see me? 1.3354 0.04680 164 120 33 11
2001 The saddle shoes didn’t come in cool colors. 1.3354 0.04434 164 122 31 11
2002 You sure you wanna go there, hat boy? 1.3354 0.04600 164 119 35 10
2003 Just breaking them in. 1.3354 0.04349 164 116 41 7
2004 Even the horses are divided. 1.3354 0.04837 164 122 29 13
2005 Home on the strange. 1.3354 0.04990 164 124 25 15
2006 My therapist told me to be myself, but I need shoes for that. 1.3354 0.04759 164 121 31 12
2007 Seriously, that's the hat you went with? 1.3354 0.04262 164 115 43 6
2008 Okay, slow down, you and your sister came across a wizard and then what? 1.3354 0.04518 164 118 37 9
2009 You’re not the horse I rode in on. 1.3354 0.04434 164 117 39 8
2010 I know what you are thinking but this is part of who I am. 1.3354 0.04914 164 123 27 14
2011 Step aside, Bucko. I don’t see a badge that says ‘Fashion Police.’ 1.3354 0.04680 164 120 33 11
2012 Um, no. I haven’t seen Vicki and Susan anywhere. Why are you asking? 1.3354 0.04914 164 123 27 14
2013 A horse with no name brands. 1.3353 0.04997 167 127 24 16
2014 I'm announcing my candidacy for presidential election as the real stable genius. #RealStableGenius 1.3353 0.04622 167 122 34 11
2015 You've heard of a clothes horse? I like shoes. 1.3333 0.04716 162 119 32 11
2016 Casual Friday. 1.3333 0.04495 165 119 37 9
2017 Some people see four blue shoes and some see four pink shoes. 1.3333 0.04656 165 121 33 11
2018 Yep, I prefer these to loafers as well, but it's always a bitch tying the laces 1.3333 0.03579 165 124 34 7
2019 I know the Jimmy Choos don't go with the Louboutin's, but I just couldn't decide... 1.3333 0.04465 162 116 38 8
2020 Well, Butch, I'm a gelding. What else do you suggest I do for excitement? 1.3333 0.04735 165 122 31 12
2021 I assume those shoes are made for walking? 1.3333 0.04796 162 120 30 12
2022 Too metro? 1.3333 0.04108 165 120 38 7
2023 Whatever it is you’re looking for in Hollywood—I hope you find it. 1.3333 0.04954 162 122 26 14
2024 You miss her, don't you? 1.3333 0.03527 165 128 28 9
2025 Don't blame me if you're too cheap to hire a real blacksmith. 1.3333 0.04108 165 122 34 9
2026 I wanted some slip-on options for when you’re not around 1.3333 0.04576 165 120 35 10
2027 It’s to cover my tracks! 1.3333 0.04412 165 118 39 8
2028 Saddle shoes aren’t as comfortable as I thought 1.3333 0.04495 165 119 37 9
2029 You said Rodeo Drive. 1.3313 0.04691 163 120 32 11
2030 Really Doug? Spurs? I thought we had an agreement! 1.3313 0.04691 163 120 32 11
2031 I'm taking up tap-dancing. 1.3313 0.04691 163 120 32 11
2032 I don’t wear socks in the summer. 1.3313 0.04691 163 120 32 11
2033 It turned out to be a nail saloon 1.3313 0.04442 163 117 38 8
2034 You think they clash with my saddle? 1.3313 0.04527 163 118 36 9
2035 I thought you said this was "business casual" 1.3313 0.04771 163 121 30 12
2036 Don’t worry, you can’t see them on Zoom. 1.3313 0.04752 160 118 31 11
2037 It’s called fashion. Ever heard of it? 1.3313 0.04752 160 118 31 11
2038 Now get me some pants 1.3313 0.04994 160 121 25 14
2039 Since I've retired I only wear slippers all day. 1.3313 0.04583 160 116 35 9
2040 What do you mean, "You didn't save the receipt?" 1.3313 0.04409 160 114 39 7
2041 They didn't have them in brown? 1.3313 0.03284 160 120 34 6
2042 Be honest. Do they make me look like two people inside a horse costume? 1.3313 0.04994 160 121 25 14
2043 Be honest, do these shoes make me look like a horse? 1.3313 0.04834 160 119 29 12
2044 You can be Elvis Presley or Judy Garland, but you can't be both. 1.3313 0.04668 160 117 33 10
2045 Miami blacksmith. 1.3313 0.04668 160 117 33 10
2046 Is that a hat you’re wearing or are you just happy to see me? 1.3313 0.04915 160 120 27 13
2047 No more Ten Gallon Hats, so I chose the Magnum. 1.3313 0.04915 160 120 27 13
2048 These shoes are made for walkin', and that's just what they'll do. 1.3293 0.04420 164 118 38 8
2049 Actually, Equine Gender Nonconformity is not an expression I am familiar with. 1.3292 0.04644 161 118 33 10
2050 No sillier than your hat. 1.3292 0.04386 161 115 39 7
2051 Am I overdressed? 1.3292 0.04297 161 114 41 6
2052 It could have been worse. They could have given you stillettos. 1.3292 0.05045 161 123 23 15
2053 Did you miss the memo about casual Friday? 1.3292 0.04727 161 119 31 11
2054 Was it the shoemaker, farrier, or blacksmith you said was colorblind? 1.3292 0.03270 161 119 37 5
2055 That second stimulus check really came in handy 1.3292 0.04474 161 116 37 8
2056 That was one good trip to the Salvation Army store. 1.3292 0.04888 161 121 27 13
2057 You didn't have to nail these on. 1.3291 0.04529 158 114 36 8
2058 I did not say you need new whore's shoes! 1.3291 0.04617 158 122 23 13
2059 Yay to the new horseshoes. Neigh to the matching saddle. 1.3291 0.03959 158 118 32 8
2060 Not half as bad as that silly hat, Dude! 1.3291 0.04872 158 118 28 12
2061 To be honest, the blue. 1.3291 0.04617 158 115 34 9
2062 For want of a heel... 1.3291 0.04704 158 116 32 10
2063 Wow, really, Mr. Penis-hat? 1.3291 0.04789 158 117 30 11
2064 They're made from recycled oat husks and help me leave a smaller carbon hoof print. 1.3291 0.04529 158 114 36 8
2065 From now on I'm non-binary. 1.3291 0.04439 158 113 38 7
2066 But all the other horses are wearing them. 1.3272 0.04451 162 117 37 8
2067 Nice. And yes, I can support whatever kind of horse you want to be. 1.3272 0.04451 162 117 37 8
2068 I hope you kept the receipt 1.3272 0.04364 162 119 35 8
2069 It's a one-horse race, I'm supported by Democrats and Republicans alike. 1.3270 0.04721 159 120 27 12
2070 The farrier an I are both working from home. 1.3270 0.05164 159 123 20 16
2071 I just don't want to be wearing the same thing as everyone else 1.3270 0.04505 159 115 36 8
2072 So now you know. I identify as trans-equine. 1.3270 0.04846 159 119 28 12
2073 Can I borrow your hat? I'm getting ready for my next zoom meeting. 1.3270 0.04763 159 118 30 11
2074 Really Jim? I said nothing about your hat... 1.3270 0.04505 159 115 36 8
2075 Lucky for you, no one will see them on Zoom. 1.3270 0.04846 159 119 28 12
2076 Laugh all you want, Trevor. I’ve never felt so myself. 1.3270 0.04416 159 114 38 7
2077 This will just have to do until the farrier opens back up in Phase 4. 1.3270 0.04763 159 118 30 11
2078 i thought i told you, we took the tap dancing part out of the routine 1.3270 0.04846 159 119 28 12
2079 Don’t worry, these shoes are lucky too 1.3270 0.04505 159 115 36 8
2080 The different colors? Helps me remember front from back. 1.3269 0.04826 156 116 29 11
2081 Ummmm Buck, did you have something you wanted to tell me? 1.3269 0.04652 156 114 33 9
2082 ... only until the blacksmith reopens. 1.3269 0.04911 156 117 27 12
2083 Where's your mask? 1.3269 0.04826 156 116 29 11
2084 They didn't have saddle oxfords in my size. 1.3269 0.04652 156 119 26 11
2085 I'm a old cowhand. Your ma hoss. Any other questions? 1.3269 0.00643 156 126 25 5
2086 Definitely the blue ones 1.3269 0.04471 156 112 37 7
2087 Seriously? The blacksmith is in quarantine? 1.3269 0.04652 156 114 33 9
2088 Just straddling the political divide 1.3269 0.04826 156 116 29 11
2089 Dude! Forget it. I love you. I'm wearing flats so that you look taller for the pictures. I'm here for you, man! 1.3269 0.04562 156 113 35 8
2090 I don't care if they are more comfortable, movie audiences expect to hear clippitty-clop. 1.3269 0.04562 156 113 35 8
2091 Okay, now the hat. Hand it over." 1.3269 0.04562 156 113 35 8
2092 I ended up going with both pairs... 1.3269 0.04826 156 116 29 11
2093 I would like to know where the deer and antelope play. 1.3269 0.04471 156 112 37 7
2094 You're not fooling anyone either in that get-up, Harold. 1.3269 0.04377 156 111 39 6
2095 Ebay. 1.3269 0.04740 156 115 31 10
2096 I'm SO over that barefoot running fad. 1.3269 0.04562 156 113 35 8
2097 I am no longer Ed. I only answer to Eydie. 1.3269 0.04607 156 116 30 10
2098 How would I know the dress code? This is my first rodeo. 1.3269 0.04377 156 111 39 6
2099 Maybe now the deer and the antelope will let me play. 1.3269 0.04562 156 113 35 8
2100 Why can't my shoes be lucky and stylish? 1.3269 0.04652 156 114 33 9
2101 I don’t know. I think I would have waited until they had four of the same color in stock. 1.3269 0.04562 156 113 35 8
2102 The new farrier really gets me. 1.3269 0.04233 156 112 38 6
2103 I'm over clip-clop. Get ready for tap. 1.3269 0.04562 156 113 35 8
2104 Well, I have the receipt, of course. 1.3269 0.04652 156 114 33 9
2105 They were free shipping 1.3269 0.04652 156 114 33 9
2106 Why do you judge me? Do I ever judge you in that hat? 1.3269 0.04652 156 114 33 9
2107 Relax, it’s just going to be a Zoom call 1.3269 0.04826 156 116 29 11
2108 Steve the Stallion finally came out. 1.3269 0.04826 156 116 29 11
2109 Look, I didn't question the bedazzled belt stage you went through, Joe. 1.3269 0.04377 156 111 39 6
2110 ... so I kick you in the face, and then you’ll know if you’re having a boy or a girl 1.3269 0.04740 156 115 31 10
2111 Do these make my feet look big? 1.3248 0.04627 157 115 33 9
2112 Horseshoes? I thought you said "Whores' shoes. 1.3248 0.05049 157 120 23 14
2113 My old mare likes blue , but the filly likes pink. 1.3248 0.04627 157 117 30 10
2114 You can take the horse out of the city, but you can't take the city out of the horse. 1.3248 0.04259 157 111 41 5
2115 I think the blue look better on your back feet, honey. 1.3248 0.04714 157 116 31 10
2116 I cautioned you not to get a farrier from an ad in the Fire Island News 1.3248 0.03961 157 120 28 9
2117 But Bill, for goodness sake, it's Friday night! 1.3248 0.04800 157 117 29 11
2118 I thought you said Rodeo, like the drive. 1.3248 0.04113 157 117 32 8
2119 I’m making hay with shoe endorsements. 1.3248 0.04307 157 114 36 7
2120 Just trying to fit in with you urban cowboys. 1.3248 0.04538 157 114 35 8
2121 That’s a really stupid hat. 1.3248 0.04714 157 116 31 10
2122 Do these make my legs look good? 1.3248 0.04714 157 116 31 10
2123 But today is Casual Friday. 1.3248 0.04354 157 112 39 6
2124 Hey Pard, there's more than one way to shoe a horse! 1.3248 0.04538 157 114 35 8
2125 I got 'em on Closeout at the OK Corral... 1.3248 0.04538 157 114 35 8
2126 Look, don't judge me until you walk in my shoes. 1.3248 0.04627 157 115 33 9
2127 I prefer “Mr. Edna.” 1.3248 0.04800 157 117 29 11
2128 Well, you'll have to decide by November 3rd. 1.3248 0.04884 157 118 27 12
2129 The farrier was on vacation - I went to Foot Locker. 1.3248 0.04800 157 117 29 11
2130 Screw your boots - these shoes were made for struttin’ 1.3248 0.03961 157 118 32 7
2131 But these are much more comfortable than the nailed on shoes. 1.3248 0.04583 157 117 30 10
2132 W-e-l-l, if you ain't a fashion-neeiigh-sta, I never saw one. 1.3248 0.04714 157 116 31 10
2133 I found them on eNeigh. 1.3248 0.04627 157 115 33 9
2134 The insoles are a game changer. 1.3248 0.04800 157 117 29 11
2135 My pronouns are "Nee" and "Neigh." 1.3248 0.04714 157 116 31 10
2136 I see the blacksmiths are still on strike... 1.3248 0.04800 157 117 29 11
2137 Be honest. Does this hat make me look lame? 1.3248 0.04714 157 116 31 10
2138 The lockdown has been hard on the fairy godmother. 1.3248 0.04884 157 118 27 12
2139 Horse of a different color was just a figure of speech. 1.3248 0.03909 157 115 36 6
2140 Sorry, I didn't bring my running shoes. 1.3247 0.04596 154 112 34 8
2141 You know that new lady blacksmith in town? 1.3247 0.04310 154 109 40 5
2142 You know what they say: Happy horse, happy house. 1.3247 0.04160 154 115 31 8
2143 No, don't worry, they just postponed the Kentucky Derby. 1.3247 0.04260 154 113 34 7
2144 They told me flats would be more comfortable. 1.3247 0.04407 154 110 38 6
2145 I tried to walk a mile in your shoes, but I just couldn't. 1.3247 0.04596 154 112 34 8
2146 They've got me doing gender reveal parties now. 1.3247 0.05036 154 117 24 13
2147 Time for you to braid my tail and mane. I'm headed out on a date. 1.3247 0.04865 154 115 28 11
2148 This isn’t what it looks like 1.3247 0.04865 154 115 28 11
2149 Are these too formal for a train robbery? 1.3247 0.04642 154 115 29 10
2150 Tell Zappos to exchange them. You do want two right blue and teo left red. 1.3247 0.05036 154 117 24 13
2151 Do they match? He said they did, but I can't see my feet, and you know how pushy shoe salesman can be. 1.3247 0.04596 154 112 34 8
2152 I’ve got my eye on the matching saddle bags. 1.3247 0.04455 154 115 30 9
2153 Well you got a gun. 1.3247 0.04951 154 116 26 12
2154 I'm just protecting my nails. 1.3247 0.04777 154 114 30 10
2155 I'm embarrassed too, but the other ones gave me blisters. 1.3247 0.04777 154 114 30 10
2156 Don’t forget to change into heels before you get to the office. 1.3247 0.04865 154 115 28 11
2157 It wasn't my idea to play political horseshoes. 1.3247 0.04951 154 116 26 12
2158 Let me guess, ‘Buy one, get one free’. 1.3247 0.04596 154 112 34 8
2159 What are you looking at? 1.3247 0.04951 154 116 26 12
2160 I know the rodeo will be on Zoom, I just wanted to feel special. 1.3247 0.04777 154 114 30 10
2161 I was going for business in the front, party in the back. 1.3247 0.04455 154 113 33 8
2162 I can tap the back pair to go home, and the front to go to the range. 1.3247 0.04687 154 113 32 9
2163 Don't tell me you forgot about our dinner reservation? 1.3247 0.04777 154 114 30 10
2164 Cowboy: “Do your hooves go to the end of those shoes?” Horse: “I will tell you if you tell me if your head goes to the top of that hat.” 1.3233 0.04955 133 97 29 7
2165 I’m gender neutral. 1.3228 0.04602 158 116 33 9
2166 That new farrier has quite a sense of humor! 1.3226 0.05008 155 118 24 13
2167 You can't keep me on the ranch forever, Dad. 1.3226 0.04838 155 116 28 11
2168 I've been getting into running lately. 1.3226 0.04662 155 114 32 9
2169 Really? Someone in that hat is telling me my shoes aren't fashionable? 1.3226 0.04838 155 116 28 11
2170 I knew naming you Cinderella would be a mistake. 1.3226 0.04336 155 113 35 7
2171 Gender is a cultural construct. 1.3226 0.04662 155 114 32 9
2172 Magnum is so 2001, I call this the Hoofbrau. 1.3226 0.05253 155 121 18 16
2173 I never skip hind leg day 1.3226 0.05173 155 120 20 15
2174 Yes you have been gelded why do you ask? 1.3224 0.04535 152 110 35 7
2175 What do you mean,'They don't match?' 1.3224 0.04630 152 111 33 8
2176 But I still can't tell my left from my right. 1.3224 0.04535 152 110 35 7
2177 You have no idea how hard it is to find shoes my size. 1.3224 0.04535 152 110 35 7
2178 Ah, you dressed up too! 1.3224 0.04904 152 114 27 11
2179 Do I clash? 1.3224 0.04133 152 116 27 9
2180 I'm nonbinary in a binary way. 1.3224 0.04389 152 116 28 8
2181 They're both Ferragamo but only the style in front is still available. 1.3224 0.04815 152 113 29 10
2182 YOU try finding two matching pairs in the desert! 1.3224 0.04185 152 109 38 5
2183 While I really appreciate this; for future reference, it is "a horse of a different color". 1.3224 0.04904 152 114 27 11
2184 I think we need to talk about the new ranch hand... 1.3224 0.04389 152 111 34 7
2185 Honestly, what I said about dressing up the barn animals was just a throwaway line. 1.3224 0.05079 152 116 23 13
2186 You said the Wild West. 1.3224 0.04389 152 113 31 8
2187 They weren’t sure if they were expecting a boy or a girl, but they really weren’t expecting a horse. 1.3224 0.04630 152 111 33 8
2188 Michael, haven’t you heard of Zappos? At least have my shoes match like yours. 1.3224 0.01772 152 120 27 5
2189 You’re Rodeo, and I’m Rodeo Drive. 1.3203 0.04605 153 112 33 8
2190 They fit, but I don't feel as lucky as I used to. 1.3200 0.04853 150 112 28 10
2191 I’m leaving you for another farrier. 1.3200 0.04853 150 112 28 10
2192 You said to wear my lucky horseshoes. 1.3200 0.04469 150 108 36 6
2193 I think our new farrier is colorblind. 1.3200 0.04760 150 111 30 9
2194 My pronouns are they, them, theirs. 1.3200 0.04665 150 110 32 8
2195 I want a hat. 1.3200 0.04568 150 109 34 7
2196 Shoes or no shoes...can we still ride off into the sunset? 1.3200 0.05034 150 114 24 12
2197 Now give me your pants. 1.3200 0.04944 150 113 26 11
2198 Well, those are horseshoes of a different color. 1.3200 0.04568 150 109 34 7
2199 Uhh... your wife left these in the barn. 1.3200 0.04665 150 110 32 8
2200 Why? Stylish and they don't have to be nailed on! 1.3200 0.04568 150 109 34 7
2201 This is going too far. Now you will stretch out my pink ones too. 1.3200 0.05122 150 115 22 13
2202 That’s right, from now on you don’t get to choose my shoes anymore. 1.3200 0.04760 150 111 30 9
2203 Yes I have a strange shaped head but you're just deflecting the conversation . 1.3200 0.04368 150 112 30 8
2204 Yes, I walked that mile--still don't get who you are Roy, and I doubt I ever will. 1.3200 0.04760 150 113 27 10
2205 I didn't know this was a one horse town. 1.3200 0.05378 150 118 16 16
2206 Looks like you’re ready for the gender reveal party. 1.3200 0.04665 150 110 32 8
2207 Not quite the Cinderella moment I was hoping for. 1.3200 0.04944 150 113 26 11
2208 You try walking a mile in my horseshoes! 1.3200 0.04617 150 114 26 10
2209 I kind of like them both 1.3200 0.04368 150 107 38 5
2210 So it is green on starboard and red on port; not forward and aft? 1.3179 0.04494 151 112 31 8
2211 You misunderstood “an appearance at fashion week”.... 1.3179 0.04494 151 112 31 8
2212 They give me giddy ups. 1.3179 0.04826 151 113 28 10
2213 I've got to cut down on the peyote in my coffee. 1.3179 0.04639 151 111 32 8
2214 Sure, I’ll be part of the gender reveal party. What do you need me to do? 1.3179 0.04543 151 110 34 7
2215 Oo someone has a date tonight 1.3179 0.04028 151 110 36 5
2216 Are those my shoes, Carl? 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2217 I thought these lifts would help me see over your hat. 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2218 Well, you sure got your fancy gloves on, but I ain't letting you out until you tell me where you hid your mask! You hear me, boy! 1.3176 0.05167 148 114 21 13
2219 Don't worry, I've got a set of horseshoes for the office. 1.3176 0.04701 148 109 31 8
2220 Neigh? 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2221 But you haven't worn them in three years, Wilbur. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2222 Yes, they're my prancing shoes. Shall we talk about your outfit? 1.3176 0.04602 148 113 25 10
2223 Which ones make me look hot to trot? 1.3176 0.04701 148 109 31 8
2224 Why are you wearing your sisters' shoes? 1.3176 0.04701 148 109 31 8
2225 I was tired of sewing masks, so I created a new line of stylish over-the-hoof wear. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2226 What do ya mean “what is this?” They’re called horse shoes. 1.3176 0.04985 148 112 25 11
2227 i never knew you wanted to be a tap dancer. 1.3176 0.04985 148 112 25 11
2228 I think your hat is sillier 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2229 Let's just say I ain’t what I used to be. 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2230 No I'm not "horsing around", I love the way they look. 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2231 Not this dance. I have two left feet. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2232 Stay out of my closet! 1.3176 0.04985 148 112 25 11
2233 It's required at the Lgbequestrian Club 1.3176 0.04845 148 113 24 11
2234 You'd better be ready, Cowboy. I feel like dancin'! 1.3176 0.04501 148 107 35 6
2235 For the last time, I am not taking you to the barn dance! 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2236 Horses cannot see red. If you doubt it, Google it. 1.3176 0.04798 148 112 26 10
2237 Can we regift them? 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2238 When I said "you need new shoes" this is not what I imagined. 1.3176 0.04701 148 109 31 8
2239 Old gray mare, my foot! 1.3176 0.05031 148 115 20 13
2240 I've never been tested for color-blindness. Why do you ask? 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2241 But they were on sale. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2242 Well, you're a great one to talk. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2243 That’s right, Partner. I’m coming out of the stall. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2244 I figured if we're going to the Old Town Road, I also should wear something from Gucci. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2245 I'm not shy about showing both ends of my personality. 1.3176 0.04892 148 111 27 10
2246 Blacksmith on Rodeo Drive? 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2247 Seriously Earl,you call that a hat? 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2248 Oh, so I'm not allowed to go to Famous Footwear now? 1.3176 0.04701 148 109 31 8
2249 It's been hard getting to a blacksmith during COVID. 1.3176 0.04398 148 106 37 5
2250 Trust me, they'll look fine once you put those sequins on my saddle. 1.3176 0.04701 148 109 31 8
2251 Now do I look like a stud? 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2252 Not that it's any of your business, but ..my mother sent it to me. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2253 That's the last time I let my wife choose the farrier. 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2254 They were final sale. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2255 Looks like the lights went out in the stable again. 1.3176 0.04701 148 109 31 8
2256 Shoes make the horse, don't you know. 1.3176 0.04701 148 109 31 8
2257 Well you said to get ready to show at the Derby. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2258 Cool hat.” “Yeah, thanks 1.3176 0.03840 148 118 20 10
2259 Why do cowboys dress so weird? 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2260 The farrier nailed it this time. 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2261 Should I have gone with the kitten heel? 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2262 We are NOT going into town with you dressed like that. 1.3176 0.04398 148 106 37 5
2263 Well, it's my first rodeo. 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2264 ‘You should see what the goat got on sale’. 1.3176 0.04602 148 108 33 7
2265 We’re still in Kansas, huh? 1.3176 0.04501 148 107 35 6
2266 Working from home really has its perks. 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2267 The salon and the shoe store reopened 1.3176 0.04292 148 110 31 7
2268 I hired a new farrier and I thought he was going to be good since his name is Jimmy Shoe. 1.3176 0.04985 148 112 25 11
2269 ‘Yay or nay on the hat?’ 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2270 I give up, new saddle? 1.3176 0.04985 148 112 25 11
2271 Well I say they match 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2272 Matching shoes is so last week! 1.3176 0.04701 148 109 31 8
2273 They said it’s important to still get dressed and ready for the day. 1.3176 0.04292 148 105 39 4
2274 I just wanna know from the horse's mouth, how does it really feel to be in somebody else's shoes? 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
2275 Frankly I was hoping I'd stand out, since I've been through the desert as a horse with no name 1.3176 0.04985 148 112 25 11
2276 @newyorkercartoons my daughter dressed me, don’t ask 1.3176 0.04892 148 111 27 10
2277 Oh please, you don’t know fashion... Have you seen your hat!? 1.3176 0.04292 148 105 39 4
2278 I'm gonna get so much poon in these 1.3176 0.05427 148 117 15 16
2279 They're actually pretty comfortable. 1.3162 0.04391 136 96 37 3
2280 Of course, you can borrow them any time. 1.3158 0.04934 133 98 28 7
2281 How was your Riverdance audition? 1.3158 0.05160 133 100 24 9
2282 The best part is, I signed TWO major shoe contracts! 1.3154 0.04674 149 110 31 8
2283 Change your shoes. A horse divided cannot stand. 1.3154 0.05047 149 114 23 12
2284 Truth is, I've always wanted to be a horse of a different color. 1.3154 0.04674 149 110 31 8
2285 This isn’t what they meant by diversity 1.3154 0.04770 149 111 29 9
2286 You knew I was a show horse. 1.3151 0.04533 146 106 34 6
2287 Sorry, they didn't have two pair that matched in your size. 1.3151 0.04533 146 106 34 6
2288 Yes, I most certainly did expense these! 1.3151 0.04636 146 107 32 7
2289 Thanks for recommending the insoles: Finally, I can gallop in style without sacrificing comfort. 1.3151 0.04636 146 107 32 7
2290 Should we return them? 1.3151 0.04428 146 105 36 5
2291 For the hundredth time. They don't make you look fat. 1.3151 0.05121 146 112 22 12
2292 Yeah, I'm undecided too. 1.3151 0.04636 146 107 32 7
2293 Are you sure they didn't say dressage? 1.3151 0.04636 146 107 32 7
2294 Where did you find anyone who still does "Dye-to-Match ? 1.3151 0.04265 146 111 28 7
2295 Gosh darn it, Silver, I think wearing a mask will make me look weak! 1.3151 0.05121 146 112 22 12
2296 I won’t comment if you don’t comment. 1.3151 0.04636 146 107 32 7
2297 Your hat needs a ribbon or something. 1.3151 0.05027 146 111 24 11
2298 I think the farrier has been spending too much time on Instagram lately ... 1.3151 0.01287 146 115 28 3
2299 Just promise me this is our last gender reveal gig. 1.3151 0.05121 146 112 22 12
2300 Jimmy Choo. Half off. 1.3151 0.04933 146 110 26 10
2301 you want the hat too ? 1.3151 0.04737 146 108 30 8
2302 So I tap the rear ones together three times, and say, 'There's no place like home on the range?' 1.3151 0.04737 146 108 30 8
2303 Of course I'm impressed, but Margie's still not gonna let you in the house. 1.3151 0.04836 146 109 28 9
2304 Moving forward I'd prefer they/them/their 1.3151 0.04533 146 106 34 6
2305 Do these shoes make my hindquarters look too big? 1.3151 0.04933 146 110 26 10
2306 YOU try walking all day in iron shoes. 1.3151 0.05027 146 111 24 11
2307 I'm saying neigh to those boring horse shoes. 1.3151 0.05212 146 113 20 13
2308 Don't be mad. They were having a BOGO. 1.3151 0.04737 146 108 30 8
2309 Neiman Marcus. Two for one sale. Like them? 1.3151 0.04533 146 106 34 6
2310 But I'm tired of sensible shoes. 1.3151 0.04533 146 106 34 6
2311 Just what we need, a farrier with a sense of humor! 1.3151 0.04933 146 110 26 10
2312 It’s the Blacksmith, isn’t it? 1.3151 0.04836 146 109 28 9
2313 Whatever, man, your hat is too big! 1.3151 0.04585 146 109 29 8
2314 I'm gender neutral, that's why! 1.3151 0.04428 146 107 33 6
2315 I know. I'm usually not into computer match ups either. 1.3151 0.04533 146 106 34 6
2316 Oh relax, no one can see them on the Zoom calls 1.3151 0.04209 146 111 28 7
2317 What? They’re not real leather. 1.3151 0.04636 146 109 29 8
2318 But they’re made for walking 1.3151 0.04737 146 108 30 8
2319 I’m just saying they’re impractical. 1.3151 0.04374 146 109 30 7
2320 And that's how the rancher discovered he was colorblind 1.3151 0.04836 146 109 28 9
2321 You're from the city, aren't you. 1.3151 0.04095 146 102 42 2
2322 Boy these gender reveal parties do get weirder each year eh Jerry? 1.3151 0.04374 146 112 25 9
2323 This does in fact, appear to be your first rodeo. 1.3145 0.05535 124 95 19 10
2324 Two for one sale? 1.3125 0.04974 144 109 25 10
2325 I was desperado! 1.3125 0.04348 144 103 37 4
2326 The other horses and I question the concept of a Dude Ranch. 1.3125 0.04774 144 107 29 8
2327 Please tell me you kept the receipt. 1.3125 0.04671 144 106 31 7
2328 Don’t give me that look, Hank, you’re the one wearing that hat! 1.3125 0.04974 144 109 25 10
2329 I can't decide if I want to return them or let you nail them in. 1.3125 0.04348 144 103 37 4
2330 My wife can never know about us. 1.3125 0.04974 144 109 25 10
2331 Kinky Boots, eh? 1.3125 0.04974 144 109 25 10
2332 go ahead, say something about my shoes. 1.3125 0.04459 144 104 35 5
2333 Honey, I think Rocket wants to be a Rockette 1.3103 0.04433 145 105 35 5
2334 I quit! 1.3103 0.04644 145 107 31 7
2335 We have to stay off the trails, I don't want to get them dirty. 1.3103 0.04846 145 109 27 9
2336 I'm breaking them in for a friend. 1.3103 0.04540 145 106 33 6
2337 No? 1.3099 0.04812 142 106 28 8
2338 Since he was an expert at the walk, trot, canter and gallop. He was now ready to take on the tap. 1.3099 0.04812 142 106 28 8
2339 You’re not pounding any more nails into my feet. 1.3099 0.05114 142 109 22 11
2340 They are the new Air Secretariats. 1.3099 0.04707 142 105 30 7
2341 Well, you got that new hat. 1.3099 0.04707 142 105 30 7
2342 Whoa cowboy, I wouldn't be caught dead in that hat! 1.3099 0.04812 142 106 28 8
2343 Milton wasn’t sure what to make of his colt’s sudden desire to become a racy-horse. 1.3099 0.05016 142 108 24 10
2344 Why the long hat? 1.3099 0.04654 142 107 27 8
2345 People kept taking my shoes, saying they were lucky, so I had to borrow yours. 1.3099 0.05114 142 109 22 11
2346 You said you wanted horseshoes. 1.3099 0.04915 142 107 26 9
2347 I was feeling my oats. 1.3099 0.04490 142 103 34 5
2348 I didn't think the color was necessary either, but you know how cartoonists are these days. 1.3099 0.04915 142 107 26 9
2349 That's dogs that are color blind and could you at least have asked? 1.3099 0.04812 142 106 28 8
2350 Sorry, Harold, but the farrier’s in quarantine. 1.3099 0.05114 142 109 22 11
2351 I wanted something fun and flirty for the summer. 1.3099 0.04915 142 107 26 9
2352 Let's go with the red shoes; let's make cowboys great again. 1.3099 0.04812 142 111 20 11
2353 OK, I'll quite laughing at your hat if you quit laughing at my shoes. 1.3099 0.04812 142 106 28 8
2354 I'm still not sure how I'm going to tie them 1.3099 0.04377 142 102 36 4
2355 You have them on the wrong feet. 1.3099 0.04490 142 103 34 5
2356 The farrier is hard of hearing. He gave me whore's shoes. 1.3099 0.04654 142 107 27 8
2357 Yeah? Well you look like an idiot with that hat. 1.3099 0.04915 142 107 26 9
2358 And Yelp gave that blacksmith five stars! 1.3099 0.04915 142 107 26 9
2359 I've come out of the closet, Billy. I'm a clothes horse. 1.3099 0.05114 142 109 22 11
2360 Don't tell me how to spend my money. 1.3099 0.04915 142 107 26 9
2361 It's a long story. 1.3099 0.04812 142 106 28 8
2362 If we're going to steal the show with our dressage routine this year you're going to need a new hat too 1.3099 0.05016 142 108 24 10
2363 Lockdown impulse buying brought a whole new meaning to the term “hot to trot”. 1.3099 0.04707 142 105 30 7
2364 Can you help me with the laces? 1.3094 0.04662 139 102 31 6
2365 It's called fashion, John. 1.3094 0.04987 139 105 25 9
2366 So, Mr. Ed, I’m seeing another side of you. 1.3094 0.05090 139 106 23 10
2367 Are you sure it's not your hat which looks ridiculous? 1.3094 0.05090 139 108 20 11
2368 Is that a carrot in your hat, or are you just excited to see me? 1.3094 0.05090 139 106 23 10
2369 I let you break me, saddle me and rein me; but I draw the line at gender conformity. 1.3094 0.04987 139 105 25 9
2370 Are your shoes nailed to your feet? 1.3094 0.04773 139 108 21 10
2371 You’d have thought horse shoes would have come in sets of four 1.3094 0.04773 139 105 26 8
2372 You don't say anything about my hat, and I won't say anything about your shoes. 1.3094 0.04881 139 104 27 8
2373 Well, you're not exactly killing it with that hat 1.3094 0.04433 139 100 35 4
2374 So, this really is your first rodeo” 1.3094 0.04549 139 101 33 5
2375 Is this your first rodeo? 1.3094 0.04773 139 103 29 7
2376 You know I cant resist a BOGO sale . 1.3094 0.03868 139 108 24 7
2377 If I were in your hat and your were in my shoes, the game would be different. 1.3094 0.05291 139 108 19 12
2378 Okay, I'm sorry for laughing at your hat. 1.3077 0.04679 143 106 30 7
2379 I just think an open-hoof sandal would be better in this kind of heat. 1.3077 0.04573 143 105 32 6
2380 You try shopping for shoes online. 1.3077 0.04885 143 108 26 9
2381 I have two pairs just like them in the barn. 1.3071 0.04744 140 104 29 7
2382 You said this was a business trip. 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2383 After a mile in her shoes, I still don't understand why your wife has stayed around so long. 1.3071 0.05258 140 109 19 12
2384 If we're going to get service, you still need to put on a shirt. 1.3071 0.05159 140 108 21 11
2385 New year. New me. New horse shoes. 1.3071 0.04634 140 103 31 6
2386 Its more than just learning the steps, Gene. You gotta feel the music. 1.3071 0.04634 140 103 31 6
2387 I had my colors done. 1.3071 0.04744 140 104 29 7
2388 I hate gender reveal parties. 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2389 Yeah, well, that’s just, like, your opinion man. 1.3071 0.04851 140 105 27 8
2390 I was kinda hoping for Air Jordans. 1.3071 0.04744 140 104 29 7
2391 I trust we still ride at dawn. 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2392 So, I buck if it’s a girl, rear if it’s a boy, got it. Remind me why we don’t just tell them? 1.3071 0.04904 140 108 22 10
2393 It's my hair, isn't it? 1.3071 0.04634 140 103 31 6
2394 Well maybe I don’t like it much when you wear chaps 1.3071 0.04522 140 102 33 5
2395 No! No! The red ones BOTH go on your left side. 1.3071 0.04744 140 104 29 7
2396 Remember: all I'm offering is the truth. Nothing more. 1.3071 0.05354 140 110 17 13
2397 You think it's all about chasing cattle round fields but I'm telling you, one day dressage is going to be huge. 1.3071 0.04634 140 103 31 6
2398 Really? That’s what you’re wearing? 1.3071 0.04744 140 104 29 7
2399 I still ain't taking you to the dance. 1.3071 0.04851 140 105 27 8
2400 Look...if not now, when? 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2401 Nike figured with most sports shut down... 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2402 Buster had his own interpretation of “horse of a different color.” 1.3071 0.04851 140 105 27 8
2403 You can change the back ones, but lay off my blue suede shoes. 1.3071 0.05258 140 109 19 12
2404 I knew I shouldn't have let the New York farrier shoe you. 1.3071 0.04042 140 108 25 7
2405 You’ve been to that Blacksmythe Shoppe on Rodeo Drive again, haven’t you? 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2406 I don't mind the colors, but you're going to want to have socks. 1.3071 0.04744 140 104 29 7
2407 These were all that were left in my size. 1.3071 0.04744 140 106 26 8
2408 Sure, Jake. I'm the one that looks ridiculous. 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2409 There they are! My wife is going to be pissed at you! 1.3071 0.04522 140 102 33 5
2410 I have a confession to make...I'm trans! 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2411 I needed the arch support. 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2412 Gosh darned blacksmith 1.3071 0.03569 140 107 28 5
2413 I guess you don't feel like going for a ride today. 1.3071 0.00717 140 114 24 2
2414 If they are all the same color, it will be too matchy-matchy. 1.3071 0.04407 140 101 35 4
2415 The rear shoes pinch and none of the colors match your outfit. 1.3071 0.04634 140 105 28 7
2416 Well, they FEEL lucky. 1.3071 0.05159 140 108 21 11
2417 The Posse will never be able to follow our trail. 1.3071 0.04522 140 102 33 5
2418 Getting these off is the part I haven’t figured out yet... 1.3071 0.04744 140 104 29 7
2419 what about the shoes I got you? 1.3071 0.04634 140 103 31 6
2420 Stimulus well spent Steve 1.3071 0.04851 140 105 27 8
2421 Nike is paying me hay for life after winning the Derby if I wear their shoes. I keep the stud fees... 1.3071 0.04228 140 107 26 7
2422 Loafers? Really? You want to wear loafers now? 1.3071 0.04744 140 104 29 7
2423 So, it seemed appropriate that the red ones would be near my horse's ass. 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2424 I'm a proud mare on a dude ranch. 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2425 I can go check in the back but I’m fairly sure that’s all we have. 1.3071 0.04522 140 102 33 5
2426 Can we stick to the paved trails today? I just got new shoes. 1.3071 0.04407 140 101 35 4
2427 I don’t know dude, the hats a bit much 1.3071 0.04744 140 104 29 7
2428 Sorry Trigger, but I couldn't get the matching pink ones in your front hoof size. 1.3071 0.04744 140 104 29 7
2429 Fashion is the new luck 1.3071 0.05109 140 110 18 12
2430 What? They’re just until the salons reopen. 1.3071 0.03913 140 109 24 7
2431 Do you ever stop horsing around? 1.3071 0.04851 140 105 27 8
2432 I see you’re hot to trot 1.3071 0.05058 140 107 23 10
2433 John knew he hit rock-bottom when he was envious of a horse. 1.3071 0.05159 140 108 21 11
2434 I felt like I needed to add some color to my life 1.3071 0.04956 140 106 25 9
2435 That’s gonna be a neigh on the shoes. 1.3071 0.04634 140 103 31 6
2436 It’s not “just a phase.” 1.3071 0.05058 140 107 23 10
2437 I wear different colored shoes cause horses is color-blind. What are your excuse for wearing those atrocity for a hat, Steve? 1.3071 0.05058 140 107 23 10
2438 What? They have great arch support. 1.3071 0.04634 140 103 31 6
2439 I’ve though about it, and I would like to move to the city 1.3071 0.04851 140 105 27 8
2440 Jimmy Choo has a 50% off sale! 1.3071 0.04851 140 105 27 8
2441 Ok, now you walk a mile in mine. 1.3066 0.04811 137 102 28 7
2442 I told you I can't be tamed. 1.3066 0.04464 137 99 34 4
2443 Those are very smart shoes but the colors are all wrong for you. 1.3066 0.05135 137 105 22 10
2444 I call it - business in the front, party in the back 1.3066 0.04811 137 102 28 7
2445 Why are you wearing Jessica's hat? 1.3066 0.04403 137 101 31 5
2446 Where did you find my hat? It’s been missing from my closet for weeks! 1.3066 0.04921 137 103 26 8
2447 Blue is forward, red is backward. 1.3066 0.04582 137 100 32 5
2448 Too Hamptons? 1.3066 0.04698 137 101 30 6
2449 So you’re going with the hat again... 1.3066 0.04582 137 100 32 5
2450 I like the red but it's up to you. 1.3066 0.04342 137 103 28 6
2451 Not every day is a sandal day, John. 1.3066 0.04921 137 103 26 8
2452 Would you quit horsing around. I told you blue to the left and red to the right. 1.3058 0.04817 121 93 21 7
2453 Zappos. Why do you ask? 1.3050 0.04715 141 105 29 7
2454 ...and when you gallop, they''ll be a blur of purple. 1.3050 0.05027 141 108 23 10
2455 What do you think? Yay or neigh? 1.3050 0.04715 141 105 29 7
2456 I was just another dumb old talking horse. That is... until I put on the shoes 1.3050 0.04661 141 107 26 8
2457 Front legs to go Back legs to stop. 1.3043 0.05404 138 109 16 13
2458 I’m guessing you dressed in the dark? 1.3043 0.04997 138 105 24 9
2459 It completes my whole "business in front, party in the back" aesthetic. 1.3043 0.04997 138 105 24 9
2460 My first rodeo - how do I look? 1.3043 0.04554 138 101 32 5
2461 I pride myself on being a horse of a different color. 1.3043 0.04316 138 99 36 3
2462 Don't even think about nailing these to my hooves. 1.3043 0.04890 138 104 26 8
2463 The blue ones are my dancing shoes, and the red ones are for kicking you in the balls. 1.3043 0.04890 138 104 26 8
2464 No! Port is Green on the Left and Starboard is Red on the Right. 1.3043 0.04437 138 100 34 4
2465 What? The blacksmith was closed due to COVID-19. 1.3043 0.05102 138 106 22 10
2466 If they try to track us they'll think it's just two cool dudes. 1.3043 0.04612 138 104 27 7
2467 I go by Edna now. 1.3043 0.04997 138 105 24 9
2468 I thought we were going to that nice ravine. 1.3043 0.04781 138 107 22 9
2469 So, which pair matches my coat better? 1.3043 0.04669 138 102 30 6
2470 I told my children to stop dressing up my horse. 1.3043 0.04781 138 103 28 7
2471 WHAT KIND OF BLACKSMITH DO YOU USE? 1.3043 0.05205 138 107 20 11
2472 No, no. It’s red to port, and green to starboard. 1.3043 0.04890 138 104 26 8
2473 They're not "Kinky Boots" but they'll do. 1.3043 0.04554 138 101 32 5
2474 Ever since the Blacksmith figured how to use Amazon, you've become a nightmare. 1.3043 0.04781 138 103 28 7
2475 Too early to say, but thanks for not nailing them on. 1.3043 0.04669 138 102 30 6
2476 Strange things happened in quarantine, eh? 1.3043 0.04554 138 101 32 5
2477 Blue or red ,I am on the fence 1.3043 0.04554 138 101 32 5
2478 Did you do something different with your hair? 1.3043 0.04997 138 105 24 9
2479 Well, your hat is stupid. 1.3043 0.04890 138 104 26 8
2480 Yes, well, everyone is wearing "personalized" face masks so I said, To hell with it; time to spice things up 1.3043 0.04669 138 102 30 6
2481 I didn't say anything about your hat, just give me this. 1.3043 0.04781 138 103 28 7
2482 I can see why you came to me for advice, but I just don’t know much about hats 1.3043 0.04554 138 101 32 5
2483 The horseshoes descriptions on amazon are way off. 1.3043 0.05501 138 110 14 14
2484 They were the only shoes in my size. 1.3043 0.04890 138 104 26 8
2485 My blacksmith just got back from Paris Fashion Week. 1.3040 0.04980 125 93 26 6
2486 This is what happens when I ask the wife to reshoe the horses. 1.3040 0.04980 125 93 26 6
2487 You, Sir, are all hat and no cattle. 1.3040 0.05591 125 98 16 11
2488 I’m a working horse... I went looking for horseshoes... on Rodeo Drive... in Beverly Hills. 1.3040 0.05355 125 96 20 9
2489 A bet's a bet Rusty. 1.3040 0.05108 125 94 24 7
2490 Ok, but only if you lose that hat. 1.3040 0.04849 125 92 28 5
2491 Do you think this is the Rainbow Round-up? 1.3040 0.05355 125 96 20 9
2492 Um, Dave, these aren't horse shoes. 1.3040 0.05355 125 96 20 9
2493 Johnny from the counter says the blue will contrast with my eyes 1.3040 0.04980 125 95 23 7
2494 I never really felt like a stallion until now. 1.3040 0.05108 125 94 24 7
2495 I read in Vogue it's declassé for finger and toenail polish to be the same color. 1.3040 0.05355 125 96 20 9
2496 Because shoes don't come in fours David! 1.3040 0.05108 125 94 24 7
2497 It was either these mismatched ones or the high heels. 1.3040 0.04980 125 93 26 6
2498 I'm firing you as my personal shopper. 1.3040 0.05233 125 95 22 8
2499 Ooh, ‘gallop.” I thought you’ve saying ‘gala.’ 1.3040 0.05233 125 95 22 8
2500 Those snakeskin? 1.3040 0.05705 125 99 14 12
2501 The new blacksmith worked for Jimmy Choo. 1.3040 0.05474 125 97 18 10
2502 I wasn't sure if you were taking me somewhere fancy or more relaxed. 1.3040 0.04980 125 93 26 6
2503 I guess they don’t make flip flops for hooves? 1.3040 0.00803 125 103 20 2
2504 They have good arch support. 1.3040 0.04980 125 93 26 6
2505 They were having a ‘buy one, get one free’ sale. 1.3040 0.05355 125 96 20 9
2506 I'm waiting for the pants to be buy one get one free. 1.3040 0.04915 125 95 23 7
2507 I don't think they'll swipe these ones from me to play horse shoes 1.3040 0.05474 125 97 18 10
2508 Don’t give me that look 1.3040 0.05233 125 95 22 8
2509 Ever seen a mule in mules? 1.3040 0.04980 125 93 26 6
2510 Tap is my life! 1.3040 0.05591 125 98 16 11
2511 Sarah, my girl, I'll be honest, you've really freaked me out a bit here... how did you tie your laces? 1.3040 0.05355 125 96 20 9
2512 Get used to it. I'm no longer hoofing it. 1.3037 0.04734 135 100 29 6
2513 Well there’s more than one way to shoe a horse Cowboy . 1.3037 0.04962 135 102 25 8
2514 Teal with pink? Really? 1.3037 0.04850 135 101 27 7
2515 Honestly Rex? I'd go with the Guccis and return the Bruno Maglis. 1.3037 0.04962 135 102 25 8
2516 OK, if it makes you feel better, I'll put one of the red shoes in front and one of the blue shoes in back. 1.3037 0.04734 135 100 29 6
2517 I thought saddle shoes and New Yorker comics only came in black and white? 1.3037 0.04962 135 102 25 8
2518 What did you do with the Manolos? 1.3037 0.04850 135 101 27 7
2519 This is the last time I’ll ever order shoes online. 1.3037 0.04962 135 102 25 8
2520 Should we return these and get the open-hooved slippers? 1.3037 0.05180 135 104 21 10
2521 How many pairs of those bucking shoes do you have? 1.3037 0.05073 135 103 23 9
2522 Do they make my hooves look big? 1.3037 0.04850 135 101 27 7
2523 I warn you, many a horse has been lost for want of a shoe... 1.3037 0.04370 135 97 35 3
2524 Can l see something in a saddle shoe? 1.3037 0.04306 135 104 24 7
2525 So now I suppose you want me to call you "they" 1.3037 0.04906 135 104 22 9
2526 Oh, I thought you said Rodeo Drive. 1.3037 0.05180 135 104 21 10
2527 It's over. And she wants all her stuff back. 1.3037 0.04734 135 102 26 7
2528 It’s called fashion, Jarred. 1.3037 0.04962 135 102 25 8
2529 It’s going to be a black-and-white photo 1.3037 0.04962 135 102 25 8
2530 It’s my version of a mullet. Business in the front, party in the back. 1.3037 0.05491 135 107 15 13
2531 This is how you "horse around." 1.3037 0.05073 135 103 23 9
2532 Open toes in the front? You don't HAVE any toes! 1.3034 0.04624 145 108 30 7
2533 You didn’t say anything about a purse! 1.3034 0.04827 145 110 26 9
2534 I should've known something was up when he changed his sign from "Blacksmith" to "Farrier". 1.3028 0.04468 142 104 33 5
2535 And you thought I couldn’t open your closet door! 1.3028 0.04895 142 108 25 9
2536 You may be confusing the yellow brick road with the dusty trail. 1.3022 0.04527 139 102 32 5
2537 Yeah, the roosters are on the fence too. 1.3022 0.04752 139 104 28 7
2538 My tail is dragging. I think I need lifts for my rear shoes. 1.3022 0.05070 139 107 22 10
2539 Yer ma—God rest her soul—wanted you to have them. 1.3022 0.04860 139 105 26 8
2540 I think you have my hat. 1.3022 0.04752 139 104 28 7
2541 Six feet please. 1.3022 0.04860 139 105 26 8
2542 It’s the best I could do. Supply chains are disrupted right now. 1.3022 0.04860 139 105 26 8
2543 First rodeo? 1.3016 0.04683 126 92 30 4
2544 I could never pull off a hat like that. 1.3016 0.05197 126 96 22 8
2545 A hat would complete the look, nay? 1.3016 0.04817 126 93 28 5
2546 My usual farrier is in quarantine. 1.3015 0.04467 136 99 33 4
2547 OK, but you'll have to lose the hat. 1.3015 0.04819 136 102 27 7
2548 I got them on sale. 1.3015 0.04705 136 101 29 6
2549 I said I had horse sense, not fashion sense. 1.3015 0.04467 136 99 33 4
2550 Next time, let’s stick with a blacksmith. 1.3015 0.05147 136 105 21 10
2551 You're the first animal to be in color in the New Yorker, and you are wearing mismatching socks. Way to represent. 1.3008 0.03617 133 105 22 6
2552 I’m the horse of different colors. You’ve heard of me, right? 1.3008 0.05005 133 101 24 8
2553 Betcha some darn neighbor's running a horseshoe tournament. 1.3008 0.05061 133 104 19 10
2554 Well I don't care what you say Jon, I think they look fabulous and I want to wear them. Why are you always sniping at me? Do I critique your hat, which everyone knows scream "Compensating"? No. They all talk about you behind your back you know. Jerk. 1.3008 0.05335 133 104 18 11
2555 I'm going out to play with the deer and the antelope. Want to come? 1.3008 0.05005 133 101 24 8
2556 I was slipping when I walked down a ramp. 1.3008 0.05227 133 103 20 10
2557 But all the other fillies are wearing them now! 1.3008 0.04771 133 99 28 6
2558 The invitation said “dressage casual.” 1.3008 0.05005 133 101 24 8
2559 No more ridiculous than your Crocs 1.3008 0.04651 133 98 30 5
2560 Do you think the red shoes make me look fat? 1.3008 0.05061 133 104 19 10
2561 What no rhinestones? I am a cowboy, after all. 1.3008 0.05227 133 103 20 10
2562 You forgot my orthotics didn't you? 1.3008 0.05227 133 103 20 10
2563 Now you try walking a mile in my shoes. 1.3008 0.04947 133 103 21 9
2564 I grew up gender-neutral! 1.3008 0.04334 133 98 31 4
2565 you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it tap dance 1.3008 0.04889 133 100 26 7
2566 and that’s why you need to register and vote. Nice shoes by the way 1.3008 0.05441 133 105 16 12
2567 What? You said you didn't want to go out 1.3008 0.04771 133 99 28 6
2568 I think the blue ones bring out the color of your eyes. 1.3000 0.04723 140 105 28 7
2569 No matching belt? 1.3000 0.04204 140 105 30 5
2570 Let me guess — one of those gender reveals? 1.3000 0.04612 140 109 22 9
2571 Now Goody, if I told you once...... 1.3000 0.04723 140 105 28 7
2572 I got tired of trotting. How do you feel about loafing? 1.3000 0.04830 140 106 26 8
2573 This time, order the ones with nails.” 1.3000 0.05238 140 110 18 12
2574 I thought you'd appreciate a horseshoe of a different color. 1.3000 0.05238 140 110 18 12
2575 My new farrier is Italian. 1.3000 0.04935 140 107 24 9
2576 I’m just asking you to get off my back. 1.3000 0.04935 140 107 24 9
2577 My call came from Prancing With the Stars. 1.3000 0.04965 120 89 26 5
2578 So wadda you think? I got ‘em BOGO. 1.3000 0.04830 140 106 26 8
2579 Can we hire a REAL blacksmith? 1.3000 0.04935 140 107 24 9
2580 I went trotting through your closet. 1.3000 0.04935 140 107 24 9
2581 Ok, you win, I’ll stop wearing this hat. Now take off those shoes. 1.3000 0.05139 140 109 20 11
2582 Trust me, the loafers will deflect attention from that ridiculous hat. 1.3000 0.04500 140 103 32 5
2583 ‘No more ridiculous than your lid, broheme.” 1.3000 0.03887 140 108 26 6
2584 So, what's new in your corral? 1.3000 0.04384 140 104 31 5
2585 My shoes are a statement, and I also want a hat like yours. 1.3000 0.05038 140 108 22 10
2586 You have no right to comment. Yesterday you wore a shirt with tassels. 1.3000 0.04500 140 103 32 5
2587 Sorry, old fella, I guess I haven’t mastered ordering shoes on line. 1.3000 0.04612 140 104 30 6
2588 "The invitation said "Black Tie" not "Country Club Casual." 1.3000 0.04442 140 110 22 8
2589 You know me: never can pass by two-for-one offer. 1.3000 0.04500 140 103 32 5
2590 You are asking for trouble going into town like that. 1.3000 0.04723 140 105 28 7
2591 That hat looks ridiculous on you. 1.3000 0.04830 140 106 26 8
2592 It's hard to find a matching quadruple 1.3000 0.05038 140 108 22 10
2593 You've been reading VOGUE again, haven't you? 1.3000 0.04830 140 106 26 8
2594 You wanted shoes. I got you shoes. Quit complaining and let's go. 1.3000 0.04830 140 106 26 8
2595 You’re the one that insisted that I wear horseshoes 1.3000 0.05038 140 108 22 10
2596 I agree. Metal Shoes are so yesterday. 1.3000 0.04612 140 104 30 6
2597 Yet again I’m the only one putting in effort. 1.3000 0.04723 140 105 28 7
2598 Seriously you don’t think they clash with the color of the saddle? 1.3000 0.04612 140 104 30 6
2599 No more flip flops until I can get a pedicure. 1.3000 0.05104 120 90 24 6
2600 ... I finally realized I am gender neutral 😊 1.3000 0.02813 140 113 21 6
2601 They're from the Bridle and Formal shop 1.3000 0.04143 140 105 30 5
2602 I rode in on this? 1.3000 0.05104 120 90 24 6
2603 Let's take a new tack. 1.3000 0.04723 140 105 28 7
2604 I never wanted to do this anyway, but okay 1.3000 0.04723 140 105 28 7
2605 That’s it, we are getting a new farrier. 1.3000 0.05038 140 108 22 10
2606 It's supposed to be green - starboard, and red - port, not green - front, red - rear. 1.3000 0.04830 140 106 26 8
2607 I thought we could go dancing tonight... 1.2991 0.04970 117 94 14 9
2608 Ever since I’ve been a gelding I’ve had an uncontrollable desire to shop for shoes 1.2991 0.04585 117 89 23 5
2609 I told you to check the new blacksmith's references. 1.2985 0.05084 134 103 22 9
2610 What!? A talking horse! 1.2985 0.04972 134 102 24 8
2611 You know no one can see your shoes over zoom, right? 1.2985 0.04858 134 101 26 7
2612 Why the long face, cowboy? I want to look shod, not shoddy. 1.2979 0.05107 141 110 20 11
2613 Two Reeboks and two Skechers. I diversify my runs. 1.2979 0.04905 141 108 24 9
2614 I know the colors don't match but the other option had shoelaces. 1.2979 0.04905 141 108 24 9
2615 No, I distinctly remember you said the gunfight would be at the Really Nice Corral. 1.2979 0.04694 141 106 28 7
2616 Riding days are over, pal. Which way to the runway? 1.2979 0.04473 141 104 32 5
2617 Ok, I put on the shoes. Now what are you going to do with the hat? 1.2979 0.04473 141 104 32 5
2618 Well, they may not be horseshoes but they are your horse's shoes. 1.2979 0.04585 141 105 30 6
2619 They didn't have four of one color. 1.2979 0.04119 141 108 27 6
2620 Cowboy Reboot 1.2979 0.04800 141 107 26 8
2621 You said “No shoes, no service, right?” 1.2979 0.04905 141 108 24 9
2622 No, they don’t match. They go together. 1.2979 0.04694 141 106 28 7
2623 I promised to walk a mile in both of their shoes 1.2979 0.04800 141 107 26 8
2624 With these I go clop-clip. 1.2977 0.04809 131 98 27 6
2625 Quit horsing around and give me my shoes 1.2977 0.05275 131 102 19 10
2626 Now, I want a cape. 1.2977 0.05048 131 100 23 8
2627 No, I didn't say I don't like them. I just said it was different, that's all. 1.2977 0.05048 131 100 23 8
2628 Really? Maybe I’m color blind. 1.2977 0.04623 131 99 26 6
2629 I didn’t say a thing ... 1.2977 0.05048 131 103 19 9
2630 So you swear you weren’t in my closet? 1.2977 0.04686 131 97 29 5
2631 Unbelievable. I told the salesman I was colorblind! 1.2977 0.04930 131 99 25 7
2632 I slipped the blacksmith a twenty. 1.2963 0.04711 135 101 28 6
2633 Well I think your hat's pretty silly too. 1.2963 0.05159 135 105 20 10
2634 Not matchy-matchy, anyways 1.2963 0.04940 135 103 24 8
2635 Please address me as "they." 1.2963 0.04940 135 103 24 8
2636 Be honest. Do they make me look fat? 1.2963 0.05051 135 104 22 9
2637 Both colors look great on you. 1.2963 0.03337 135 106 24 5
2638 Shoes, good. But you're still gonna need a shirt or we're not getting service." 1.2963 0.04711 135 101 28 6
2639 There's a dance down at the corral tonight. 1.2963 0.04652 135 103 25 7
2640 his 'n hers 1.2963 0.05265 135 106 18 11
2641 They had them in every color. 1.2963 0.04216 135 102 28 5
2642 Howdy pardner! I'm gender fluid. 1.2963 0.05051 135 104 22 9
2643 If you don't make fun of my shoes I won’t make fun of your hat. 1.2963 0.04940 135 103 24 8
2644 I can only get you to Kansas. The green ones are just for show. 1.2963 0.04940 135 103 24 8
2645 Don’t give me that look. I read a Gallop poll that said these were IN 1.2963 0.04711 135 101 28 6
2646 Yeah, I've been through the desert on a horse from Balmain. 1.2963 0.04940 135 103 24 8
2647 Seriously, you're not getting on my back with that. 1.2963 0.05051 135 104 22 9
2648 So, for how long did the doctor say you have to wear that hat? 1.2963 0.05265 135 106 18 11
2649 .....cuz they didn’t have two matching pairs is size 24. 1.2958 0.04771 142 108 26 8
2650 Style over substance, again? 1.2958 0.04332 142 104 34 4
2651 We may be the O.K. Corral, but that don't mean anything goes. 1.2958 0.04771 142 108 26 8
2652 I'm transitioning." 1.2957 0.05520 115 89 18 8
2653 Why aren't you wearing a mask? 1.2957 0.05790 115 91 14 10
2654 Would you believe PPE? 1.2957 0.05236 115 87 22 6
2655 You said to hurry up 1.2957 0.05236 115 87 22 6
2656 But these shoes are for a horse of a different color. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2657 They ran out of blue in my size. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2658 Yea, I could never do that look, but it works for you. 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2659 I’m gender fluid. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2660 I’m not changing my hat just because you think your friends will laugh at you. 1.2955 0.03087 132 103 26 3
2661 no blacksmiths around here, these are the best I could do! 1.2955 0.05128 132 102 21 9
2662 Business in the front, horsing around in the back - that’s how I run. 1.2955 0.03685 132 101 27 4
2663 Oh yeah, well maybe these are lucky too! 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2664 They keep getting lost in the wash. 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2665 I told you I was uneasy using a new blacksmith from Beverly Hills? 1.2955 0.05128 132 102 21 9
2666 Whoa—so I’m colorblind? 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2667 No one can resist a two-for-one clearance sale. Besides, think of how much you'll save in nails! 1.2955 0.03838 132 107 17 8
2668 You need to forget about dressage, this is a dude ranch! 1.2955 0.04778 132 101 24 7
2669 I know, but blacksmiths aren't an essential service. 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2670 Saddle loafers" aren't just lazy riders, you know 1.2955 0.04465 132 99 28 5
2671 Still undecided? 1.2955 0.04465 132 101 25 6
2672 I can’t believe you’re wearing those without socks. 1.2955 0.04655 132 98 29 5
2673 Why choose if you don't have to? 1.2955 0.04530 132 97 31 4
2674 They're donating a pair for every pair purchased - so I ordered more than I need. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2675 I used to ride with "Billy the Ked" 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2676 These are great, but I'm really trying to find a pair that makes a good "clippety-cloppety" sound if you know what I mean. 1.2955 0.04655 132 98 29 5
2677 We were going to the rodeo, not Rodeo Dr. But, lemme guess, Jimmy Choo and Versace. 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2678 They were by the door and I’ve been telling you for weeks I need shoes. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2679 Don't you know that lf you're going to do designer shoes your bridle and saddle has to match! 1.2955 0.04717 132 103 21 8
2680 On Zoom, nobody knows you’re wearing lifts. 1.2955 0.05349 132 104 17 11
2681 When I said matchin’, I meant all four! 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2682 They can't see 'em on Zoom. 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2683 You’re not going anywhere without a mask. 1.2955 0.05128 132 102 21 9
2684 So you'd be willing to give up carrots for a matching bag? 1.2955 0.04655 132 98 29 5
2685 If the shoe fits, wear it" does not mean take their shoes 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2686 It's easy. Red for rear. 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2687 Come to think of it, you really do have two left feet. 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2688 As a clotheshorse, I'm dressing down. 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2689 It's the best I could do. They're human shoes. 1.2955 0.02214 132 107 21 4
2690 Yeah? Walk a mile in my shoes, pal. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2691 I dunno, Whitey...Aquamarine and pink? 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2692 You're one to talk, Mr. Funny Hat. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2693 They were on sale, BOGO 1.2955 0.04655 132 98 29 5
2694 I'm not sure exactly, I guess I just sort of thought you'd be a bit happier that your goddamned talking horse dressed itself for the first fucking time, Danny. 1.2955 0.05349 132 104 17 11
2695 Neither matches your saddlebag. 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2696 You can't wear those here. Wait until we get to California. 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2697 But you said giddy up! 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2698 Do they go with my saddle? 1.2955 0.04655 132 98 29 5
2699 I identify as a mare 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2700 Please don’t step on my blue suede shoes. 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2701 Does this work, or can you tell we’re two people in a horse costume? 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2702 Trotting in those and moving your hips—we'll call it the loco-motion." 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2703 I know they don't match, but it was all they had in my size 1.2955 0.04655 132 100 26 6
2704 How would you like it if I nailed on your shoes? 1.2955 0.04778 132 101 24 7
2705 Just remember: no white after Labor Day. 1.2955 0.04530 132 102 23 7
2706 The last thing I remember, I was at a party with Trigger and Champion. When I woke up I was wearing these. 1.2955 0.04655 132 98 29 5
2707 No one will see them on Zoom. 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2708 So now you know I’m colorblind. 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2709 I thought you said my saddle goes with any color 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2710 They're horsethotics. 1.2955 0.05240 132 103 19 10
2711 What can I say. He was the only blacksmith within a 100 miles. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2712 I said 'Saddle shoes! Saddle shoes, Dad. None of the kids at school are wearing these dumb things." 1.2955 0.05128 132 102 21 9
2713 And that’s when I knew the horse was colorblind 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2714 Horse shoes are so pony express. 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2715 The horse is out of the barn! 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2716 You know, I thought the kids screamed more than usual when I put their shoes on this morning. 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2717 These shoes weren't made for walking. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2718 So that explains the disco ball in your stable. 1.2955 0.04655 132 98 29 5
2719 Well then why is it called Rodeo Drive? 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2720 My pronouns are him/her 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2721 I’m saving up for cowboy boots next 1.2955 0.05128 132 102 21 9
2722 Where did you get that ridiculous hat? 1.2955 0.05240 132 103 19 10
2723 But the bowling alley’s still closed and they’re just soo cute 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2724 Fine. But I'm still wearing the pants around here 1.2955 0.04956 132 103 20 9
2725 This is the new gender normal, Jack 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2726 Trail running in the front, power walking in the back. 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2727 I didn't have time to paint my hooves. 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2728 Tell me the truth-which ones do you like better? I just can’t decide! 1.2955 0.04778 132 99 27 6
2729 I put some new shoes on and suddenly everything is right 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2730 How about an 11 in Black. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2731 They're reversible. 1.2955 0.05349 132 104 17 11
2732 I thought theyd go well with my dressage 1.2955 0.05014 132 101 23 8
2733 This must be what they mean by a horse of different colors 1.2955 0.05349 132 104 17 11
2734 I couldn’t decide so I went with both. 1.2955 0.04530 132 97 31 4
2735 Too hot to trot? 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2736 They just pop so much more than my dreary old horseshoes 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
2737 It was dark when I got dressed this morning. 1.2946 0.04971 129 98 24 7
2738 You have the Nerve to criticize MY fashion sense? That's rich! 1.2946 0.04971 129 98 24 7
2739 They were all out of purple. 1.2946 0.04721 129 96 28 5
2740 It's for my galloping disability. 1.2946 0.05437 129 102 16 11
2741 I always thought animals were color blind 1.2946 0.04848