Contest #717


Cartoon

717

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “I know it’s not an elephant, but we still need to talk about it.”
  2. “Well, who ever reads the entire lease?”
  3. “But they don’t allow dogs?”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2020-07-19T20:36:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2020-08-09T21:49:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2020-07-27T21:39:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued August 3, 2020
Number of captions 9629
Number of responses 1035579
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Well, at least up here we only have to feed it. 2.0991 0.00754 11004 2961 3997 4046
1 I think we got the better end of this pet-sharing deal. 2.0859 0.01051 5249 1316 2166 1767
2 I guess I misheard. I thought the realtor said there was ‘a draft’ in the apartment. 2.0666 0.00815 9687 2843 3366 3478
3 I know it's not an elephant, but we still need to talk about it. 2.0555 0.01079 5530 1639 1946 1945
4 Whadya know, three African-Americans in one New Yorker cartoon! 2.0258 0.00867 9483 3289 2673 3521
5 4-B would know for sure, but by the horns I'd say male. 2.0158 0.00813 9647 3003 3491 3153
6 Could be worse... we could live downstairs. 1.9919 0.00816 8844 2665 3596 2583
7 So, if I can see it and you can see it, then it isn't the brownies. 1.9746 0.00873 8435 2845 2968 2622
8 The zookeeper downstairs is working from home 1.9735 0.00905 7911 2708 2720 2483
9 We never should have complained about their dog. 1.9713 0.01270 3794 1216 1471 1107
10 I wish I could say that’s the weirdest thing that’s happened this year. 1.9661 0.01082 5576 1949 1880 1747
11 Frank in 1B thinks he's funny. Let's see who's laughing when we feed the giraffe Chipotle. 1.9541 0.01053 6101 2243 1908 1950
12 Well, who ever reads the entire lease? 1.9536 0.00917 7176 2357 2803 2016
13 The Realtor said we got the best end of the deal. 1.9385 0.00891 7218 2337 3001 1880
14 Room with a zoo. 1.8640 0.01311 3566 1368 1315 883
15 You tell him his shoelaces are untied, and I’ll get the manhole cover. 1.8628 0.01169 4658 1852 1596 1210
16 This would've surprised me a year ago. 1.8543 0.01156 4515 1746 1684 1085
17 Sure, this part eats a lot, but the Johnson's half has its own set of drawbacks. 1.8367 0.00860 7637 2906 3081 1650
18 Well, I guess that answers the question "Why the hole?" 1.8333 0.01488 2489 928 1048 513
19 I really think it's time we addressed the giraffe in the room. 1.8311 0.00970 6264 2500 2337 1427
20 Harry requests we cut back on her roughage. 1.8310 0.00954 6362 2514 2426 1422
21 Trust me. We got the better half. 1.8241 0.00925 6355 2407 2668 1280
22 But they don't allow dogs? 1.8218 0.01261 3766 1533 1375 858
23 If they don’t turn down the music soon, I’m giving their giraffe a laxative. 1.8123 0.01055 5769 2509 1840 1420
24 The letter said for $20 a month, we could save a giraffe." 1.7943 0.01232 4015 1736 1375 904
25 Just what did you say to Alexa 1.7878 0.01350 3450 1535 1115 800
26 Just keep telling yourself, "Rent control." 1.7877 0.01237 4041 1780 1343 918
27 I'm glad we renewed our donation to the World Wildlife Fund, but we should have opted for the tote bag. 1.7838 0.01271 3747 1637 1287 823
28 Well I thought it was a typo when it listed as a two bedroom, one full bath, one half giraffe. 1.7730 0.01905 1608 693 587 328
29 Well, we could move the couch, or we could move the TV. 1.7710 0.02060 1297 539 516 242
30 We get to feed him, and the neighbors downstairs take care of everything else. 1.7404 0.00982 5748 2536 2169 1043
31 Better reception than rabbit ears. 1.7356 0.01358 3514 1733 980 801
32 I said just for a month until they can find a bigger place. 1.7298 0.02629 766 334 305 127
33 There has to be a way to block these annoying pop-ups. 1.7215 0.01985 1551 750 483 318
34 Where does the lion sleep tonight? 1.7150 0.02359 1049 498 352 199
35 I thought he said our apartment had a draft. 1.7066 0.01729 1803 843 652 308
36 It could be worse, we could be downstairs. 1.6990 0.01179 3900 1831 1416 653
37 I guess even zookeepers are working from home now.... 1.6965 0.01336 3035 1430 1099 506
38 I'm still not convinced that domestication is the right method of conservation 1.6951 0.01414 3149 1657 811 681
39 She’s only here until the Zoo reopens. Phase four, probably. 1.6939 0.02951 624 294 227 103
40 I swear when I ordered it I thought it was Swedish for Coffee Table 1.6892 0.01538 2561 1297 763 501
41 What’s a pre-existing easement?”, I said. “Just sign the lease” you said 1.6881 0.01733 1879 927 616 336
42 All I can say is thank goodness we didn't rent downstairs. 1.6832 0.01635 1957 920 737 300
43 What the... all I did was install the latest update for Safari browser. 1.6788 0.02775 772 393 234 145
44 Things are a lot safer since the rhino moved out. 1.6786 0.01766 1864 937 589 338
45 Welcome to July 1.6783 0.01539 2891 1652 536 703
46 He always comes up to watch Animal Planet. 1.6775 0.01561 2192 1070 766 356
47 Makes you wonder how the other half lives. 1.6760 0.01694 2006 1015 629 362
48 You have to look us in the eye again sometime, Susan. 1.6725 0.01852 1774 925 505 344
49 Typical. Empty theater and he sits right in front of us. 1.6675 0.01666 2072 1067 632 373
50 The people in 14-C must have used the stairs - it would have never fit in the elevator...and now we know what that sawing noise was last night...but where's our coffee table 1.6668 0.01591 2716 1564 504 648
51 Ok. I ignored the elephant, but this? 1.6661 0.01527 2363 1182 790 391
52 She pops up for the nature documentaries. 1.6650 0.02925 615 299 223 93
53 It's no big deal. He only pops his head in to watch Jeopardy. 1.6604 0.02495 854 421 302 131
54 ‘Geoffrey the Giraffe was able exercise his Toy R Us options before they went bankrupt. Guess he cashed in’ 1.6564 0.01688 2392 1387 448 557
55 Having an elephant in the room was so 20th Century. 1.6557 0.02278 999 490 363 146
56 We only have to feed him. Think of the poor folks downstairs. 1.6549 0.01574 2315 1201 712 402
57 I thought the new tenant said she worked for Zoom and often brought her work home. 1.6506 0.02221 1059 526 377 156
58 Sure we have to feed him, but the people below us have to clean up after him. 1.6485 0.01730 1895 987 587 321
59 Remember Margret, this apartment is only 50 a month. 1.6455 0.01730 2014 1128 487 399
60 I’m so used to a stupid looking, rude, awkward, orange haired, orange faced being barging in on my day, but this guy is literally sticking his neck out for POC for once! 1.6454 0.01823 1994 1162 386 446
61 ...btw, we’ve been invited downstairs for highballs. 1.6451 0.02045 1499 830 371 298
62 We're lucky. We just have to feed him. 1.6410 0.01703 1833 944 607 282
63 When I said “getting in touch with our African roots,” this is not what I meant. 1.6395 0.02540 785 391 286 108
64 I thought I blocked all pop-ups in Safari. 1.6388 0.02336 1027 540 318 169
65 I swear the agent said the apartment had a 'draft.' 1.6325 0.01841 1521 774 532 215
66 When Geoffrey got laid off from toys-r-us, he opened a very successful pop up shop that propelled his career and helped him earn his spots as an entrepreneur. 1.6318 0.02069 1662 1022 235 405
67 The apartment below us has always been a zoo. 1.6293 0.01928 1527 821 451 255
68 They thought they were ordering a carafe. 1.6285 0.01882 1556 825 484 247
69 Maybe she'll eat shoots and leave. 1.6254 0.02794 686 360 223 103
70 Well, at least now we know what the hole is for. 1.6236 0.01875 1432 731 509 192
71 Well they did say the neighbor likes to poke his head in now and then 1.6233 0.01982 1261 639 458 164
72 It helps me ignore the elephant in the room 1.6139 0.02080 1251 673 388 190
73 These emotional support animals are getting.out of hand 1.6122 0.04253 294 157 94 43
74 Maybe last year this would have seemed bizarre. 1.6087 0.02395 800 401 311 88
75 Well, we have to feed her but the alternative was worse. 1.6081 0.02113 985 485 401 99
76 Of course I understood ‘giraffe’—I just didn’t understand ‘easement.’ 1.6031 0.02313 1018 559 304 155
77 When you said we should talk about the giraffe in the room I just thought you were bad at idioms 1.6006 0.02321 1054 596 284 174
78 It hasn't been too bad. We like the same shows. 1.6004 0.02261 991 528 331 132
79 She identifies as a coffee table. 1.6004 0.02401 991 560 267 164
80 NO. It's NOT a sign we're getting ahead. 1.5994 0.02419 1031 600 244 187
81 maybe we shouldn’t have skipped the co-op board zoom meeting last month 1.5982 0.02234 1023 549 336 138
82 To get around the no pets allowed, they claimed it is their support giraffe." 1.5968 0.02398 1007 576 261 170
83 You know it’s bad when the elephant in the room isn’t even an elephant. 1.5954 0.02317 991 545 302 144
84 Well, you can forget about getting that Ficus now. 1.5953 0.02480 986 579 227 180
85 I'm not sure a philodendron is going to do it. 1.5931 0.02494 961 562 228 171
86 I think we should have rented an apartment on a higher floor. 1.5919 0.02487 941 544 237 160
87 When he's not there, it's an emergency exit. 1.5896 0.02508 921 533 233 155
88 This is a pain in the neck, but I'll bet it's a pain in the ass downstairs. 1.5874 0.04965 223 126 63 34
89 Covid, shmovid! I told you not to trust those armchair safaris! 1.5861 0.02687 877 534 172 171
90 I think the apartment downstairs is going to be hard to rent. 1.5859 0.02482 879 495 253 131
91 Remember when I said the 8-foot ceilings would make the place seem cramped, and you said "Not to worry, we can always paint the walls a lighter color to give the place a bigger feel"? Remember? 1.5833 0.02772 852 530 147 175
92 The listing did mention an "unparalleled view of urban wildlife." 1.5832 0.02461 847 467 266 114
93 No mask but at least he’s facing away. 1.5832 0.02615 847 495 210 142
94 What a giraffehole. 1.5799 0.02777 814 498 160 156
95 As you can see ... it's a duplex. 1.5790 0.02772 810 494 163 153
96 Well, you're always saying this place could use a facelift. 1.5767 0.02866 789 508 113 168
97 It's just for Wild Kingdom, he'll be gone once the news starts. 1.5766 0.04324 248 132 89 27
98 This is better for us than for the people in the apartment downstairs. 1.5742 0.02845 761 465 155 141
99 Now you see why I don't have any plants. 1.5742 0.02546 768 424 247 97
100 So this is why the apartment was so affordable. 1.5740 0.02745 770 457 184 129
101 I said *zoom meeting not *zoo meeting. 1.5739 0.02710 744 429 203 112
102 I think we got the best end of this arrangement. 1.5712 0.02684 744 427 209 108
103 I should have looked up ‘easement.’ 1.5705 0.02644 731 411 223 97
104 Do you think she ate the coffee table? 1.5701 0.02942 742 466 129 147
105 I told you the sublet agreement was odd! 1.5701 0.02901 735 453 145 137
106 Just when I thought the year couldn't get stranger. 1.5697 0.02698 732 420 207 105
107 Well this isn't the weirdest thing that's happened this year 1.5697 0.02746 732 427 193 112
108 It's the least I could do after all the times he stuck his neck out for me. 1.5690 0.02777 717 419 188 110
109 Just be thankful we don't live in the downstairs apartment. 1.5688 0.02686 719 408 213 98
110 When I bought the place, I didn’t know what an easement was. 1.5680 0.02775 713 416 189 108
111 It’s a new app called “Bring the Zoo to You” 1.5680 0.02987 713 447 127 139
112 So you can go out and buy expensive art 'representing the struggle of our inner child during a time of pandemic', which I'm pretty sure are just the fevered crayon markings of a under-stimulated 5-year old, but I can't spend money to get rid of this damn load-bearing giraffe? Has watching endless HGTV taught you nothing? Damnit Linda, I want a divorce... you can have the condo. 1.5676 0.03069 710 457 103 150
113 It’s good that we got the giraffe. Now we don’t have to worry about stepping through that hole in the floor anymore. 1.5666 0.02732 706 405 202 99
114 It's the least we can do since he's still laid off from Toys-R-Us 1.5664 0.02681 708 400 215 93
115 I can’t see the tv !! 1.5641 0.03027 686 430 125 131
116 Like I told you, living here is a little like living in a zoo. 1.5639 0.03031 681 426 126 129
117 I think we got the best part. 1.5637 0.02580 683 369 243 71
118 It’s a load-bearing giraffe; we can’t take it down. 1.5633 0.02881 671 397 170 104
119 I thought we agreed to host a Zoom meeting, not a zoo meeting. 1.5627 0.02774 670 383 197 90
120 It's good we didn't get the other end. 1.5623 0.03028 674 420 129 125
121 The Zoo is coming for him next week. At least we got the half that eats 1.5620 0.03075 669 422 118 129
122 They really should have mentioned that there's no thirteenth floor. 1.5611 0.03120 663 423 108 132
123 She usually leaves when Animal Planet is over. 1.5606 0.02834 644 370 187 87
124 When I agreed to us subletting a room, this isn’t what I had in mind! 1.5604 0.03087 662 418 117 127
125 Um, he should probably be wearing a mask, right? 1.5588 0.04343 272 156 80 36
126 The people downstairs are paying half my rent. 1.5576 0.03088 642 401 124 117
127 You see it too, right? 1.5570 0.02876 632 367 178 87
128 Can we all just get along? 1.5559 0.03223 626 404 96 126
129 If we didn't talk about the elephant, then I'm definitely not talking about the giraffe. 1.5518 0.03012 598 356 154 88
130 The architect really stuck her neck out with this new building design 1.5507 0.03292 601 391 89 121
131 It's funny now, but 'til PETA shows up. 1.5507 0.03341 592 388 82 122
132 No mask but at least she knows to social distance. 1.5486 0.03254 576 364 108 104
133 Well, it is 2020 1.5484 0.03300 578 371 97 110
134 That's what happens when you allow pets in apartments. 1.5472 0.03374 572 374 83 115
135 Necking on the couch. Why didn't I think about that? 1.5440 0.03429 557 367 77 113
136 I think you downloaded the wrong Safari. 1.5437 0.03286 515 314 122 79
137 'Toto, I don't think we're in Chelsea anymore" 1.5436 0.03453 539 352 81 106
138 What is the scope of political correctness? 1.5428 0.03508 549 368 64 117
139 If he’s staying, we’re going to have to install stadium seating... 1.5421 0.03408 546 355 86 105
140 Okay, but other than this, we love the apartment, right?! 1.5414 0.02931 543 308 176 59
141 Giraffe that escaped from the Zoo was spotted in the lobby of an office,wagging its tail 1.5414 0.03511 543 363 66 114
142 How the Van Snoots discovered their new neighbours were nothing but gi-riff-raffe. 1.5393 0.03510 534 355 70 109
143 He's never been the same since Toys "R" Us closed. 1.5391 0.04425 230 129 78 23
144 wrong 1.5383 0.03627 522 355 53 114
145 What's a coffee table? 1.5377 0.03625 517 350 56 111
146 ‘’Just be grateful that our downstairs neighbor doesn’t play loud music.” 1.5365 0.03514 520 343 75 102
147 We definitely got the better end of the deal. 1.5347 0.03206 505 303 134 68
148 I just opened my Safari browser and this popped up. 1.5347 0.03182 505 301 138 66
149 Smart move getting a two-level apartment. Now what? 1.5344 0.03521 509 334 78 97
150 I just call it Neck Flix now. 1.5335 0.03278 493 299 125 69
151 Last week it was that ostrich ahead of us. 1.5325 0.03710 492 335 52 105
152 . . . and just when we finally addressed the elephant in the room. 1.5324 0.03093 494 286 153 55
153 Did Banksy move in downstairs? 1.5321 0.03539 498 326 79 93
154 She pays the rent for the apartment downstairs too 1.5321 0.03493 498 322 87 89
155 They say that in order to reduce the likelihood of future pandemics, we need to rethink our relationship with wild animals. We should be safe. 1.5316 0.03556 491 321 79 91
156 Ohh you said, "order a tall carafe." Yeah, that makes more sense now. 1.5309 0.04225 275 162 80 33
157 The Glor...affe hole 1.5309 0.03748 486 333 48 105
158 I knew we should have attended the last Co-Op Board meeting. 1.5297 0.03255 472 281 132 59
159 I've always preferred heads over tails. 1.5287 0.03288 471 283 127 61
160 It could be worse. We could be living in Jersey. 1.5284 0.03335 475 290 119 66
161 I’m not falling for this 1.5274 0.03755 474 323 52 99
162 Well, I guess that explains why last week the neighbors' elephant was so upset. But I have to say, I think our zoning issues are getting worse and worse. 1.5265 0.03702 471 316 62 93
163 She's a rescue 1.5259 0.03340 464 282 120 62
164 I recognize that giraffe voice, it's one of the red shirt guys who got killed off on "Star Trek"! 1.5249 0.03842 461 318 44 99
165 I thought the realtor was saying there was "an occasional draft". 1.5248 0.03268 463 279 126 58
166 Maybe you did enunciate, but what I heard was that the apartment had a draft. 1.5234 0.03411 449 275 113 61
167 Zoo has been Quarantined Mr 1.5232 0.03847 453 311 47 95
168 Don't look at it, honey. It’s going to disappear. One day — it’s like a miracle — it will disappear. 1.5228 0.03580 438 277 93 68
169 Please stop asking what else could happen in 2020. 1.5213 0.03330 445 267 124 54
170 'Nothing surprises me in 2020 anymore.' 1.5213 0.03257 447 264 133 50
171 All I said was I wished I could do more. 1.5194 0.03772 439 293 64 82
172 We’ve been trapped in this house so long, I swear I see a giraffe coming out of the floor. 1.5194 0.03254 439 258 134 47
173 At least there’s no longer an elephant in the room” 1.5194 0.03455 439 271 108 60
174 She asked me this morning why there is a Fox News and no Giraffe News. 1.5165 0.03555 395 240 106 49
175 It’s the elephants upstairs that I’m worried about. 1.5156 0.03397 417 250 119 48
176 The apartment listing did say "exotic view." 1.5154 0.03423 421 255 115 51
177 Maybe you should just give him the Netflix password. 1.5152 0.05150 198 123 48 27
178 That zookeeper guy downstairs is now working from home. 1.5146 0.03177 412 234 144 34
179 It is his Netflix account, after all. 1.5146 0.03375 412 245 122 45
180 this wasn’t what I had in mind when I suggested an open floor plan... 1.5134 0.03481 409 249 110 50
181 I know, but it sparks joy. 1.5133 0.03552 376 225 109 42
182 The condo board won't do anything, so I've started feeding it habanero peppers. 1.5133 0.03477 415 254 109 52
183 The guy below us said the lease only reads No dogs or cats". 1.5123 0.03487 408 249 109 50
184 We finally get rid of the elephant in the room...and now this. 1.5121 0.03462 412 251 111 50
185 I've ordered so many things online at this point I'm totally not surprised 1.5112 0.03431 403 242 116 45
186 Imagine if we had taken the unit two floors down. 1.5089 0.03609 395 246 97 52
187 Damn neighbors. Let’s feed it some prunes. 1.5079 0.03684 382 239 92 51
188 I like that better than the elephant in the room. 1.5078 0.03439 384 228 117 39
189 I guess they thought we said 'Zoo Meeting' 1.5077 0.03784 388 250 79 59
190 I went downstairs, but he says he doesn't know anything about a giraffe. 1.5077 0.03497 390 236 110 44
191 I said we should go for the pet free block! 1.5076 0.03990 394 268 52 74
192 I blame Trump." 1.5076 0.03776 396 257 77 62
193 Who’s gonna to tell him about Geoffrey? 1.5076 0.04022 396 272 47 77
194 What’s really odd is we have a basement apartment 1.5065 0.03753 385 246 83 56
195 Wow, it really is the concrete jungle. 1.5065 0.03353 385 225 125 35
196 Best. Zoom background. Ever. 1.5065 0.03611 387 240 98 49
197 My guess? We're in a New Yorker cartoon. 1.5052 0.03695 388 246 88 54
198 I’m not sure we brought enough hors d’oeurves. 1.5052 0.04088 388 269 42 77
199 When he said, "I'll make you sorry about those hardwood floors" I didn't know he meant this. 1.5040 0.04082 377 258 48 71
200 Maybe it's time to start talking about the giraffe in the room. 1.5031 0.05193 159 93 52 14
201 I told you it was literally a zoo down there. 1.5027 0.03554 370 224 106 40
202 I suppose this is better than the tail. 1.5013 0.04082 375 257 48 70
203 Could be worse. This end only needs to get fed. 1.5000 0.03660 364 225 96 43
204 Honestly, I thought I was just getting a tote bag. 1.5000 0.04594 216 130 64 22
205 I'm starting to rethink a lot of the impulse buys I made online in March... 1.5000 0.03762 364 230 86 48
206 Concrete jungle, am I right? 1.5000 0.04880 190 114 57 19
207 Elephant in the room, giraffe, whatever. Let’s not talk about it. 1.5000 0.03778 362 229 85 48
208 Well, it did say one of a kind views 1.5000 0.03786 294 172 97 25
209 Feng shui or no feng shui, I say we move the couch three feet so I can see the damn TV. 1.4986 0.03739 367 232 87 48
210 And we thought we were so smart to avoid the apartment under the ostrich. 1.4986 0.03678 367 229 93 45
211 That's not the half of it. 1.4972 0.03605 360 220 101 39
212 That whole mess for two scrabbles on the wall! And she even didn't sign them! 1.4972 0.04083 352 236 57 59
213 It’s only ‘til we find her real parents. 1.4968 0.03781 314 189 94 31
214 Every time I sit down for a movie, I’m stuck behind the tall guy. This is unbelievable! 1.4958 0.03813 355 226 82 47
215 You just don't want to talk about the elephant in the room. 1.4957 0.03575 349 210 105 34
216 I really don’t mind him being here, but he insists on watching nothing but nature shows. 1.4943 0.03553 352 212 106 34
217 Let's just hope he's already standing up. 1.4943 0.03658 350 215 97 38
218 We need to address the elephant in the room - it’s a giraffe 1.4943 0.03769 350 220 87 43
219 And all the realtor could talk about was the high ceilings in this building. 1.4943 0.03719 348 216 92 40
220 Meet Genie, my emotional care giraffe. (The guy downstairs and I have an understanding.) 1.4943 0.03453 348 227 79 42
221 Hey, don't complain. We got the better half of the deal. 1.4943 0.03513 348 207 110 31
222 What a relief, I thought it was termites. 1.4940 0.03932 336 215 76 45
223 To be honest, I skimmed the clause about the easement. 1.4928 0.03727 347 216 91 40
224 At least we get the cute end. 1.4928 0.03636 347 212 99 36
225 I never understood modern art 1.4928 0.03815 347 220 83 44
226 I'm so glad we moved up a floor. 1.4928 0.03704 347 215 93 39
227 'Are we allowed to change it from Jack Hanna?' 1.4928 0.04288 347 243 37 67
228 When you said, "The downstairs neighbors are animals." I thought you were being hyperbolic. 1.4928 0.03486 345 204 112 29
229 It's sad with Toys 'R' Us closed and Geoffrey still unemployed. 1.4927 0.03826 343 217 83 43
230 Maybe that’s what they meant by “open floor plan” 1.4926 0.03554 339 202 107 30
231 Have you ever thought of asking your neighbors to switch from Safari to Google Chrome? 1.4914 0.03871 348 224 77 47
232 - “If it weren’t 2020, I’d find this unexpected.” 1.4913 0.03845 346 221 80 45
233 Well, she agreed on splitting the Netflix suscription and there will be no holes in our room. 1.4913 0.04278 344 240 39 65
234 And here I thought you said the apartment below was prone to social gaffes... 1.4912 0.03812 342 216 84 42
235 Alexa please order a new carafe 1.4911 0.03793 336 210 87 39
236 Well let's just address the giraffe in the room. 1.4910 0.03715 334 205 94 35
237 Feels more crowded since the zookeepers started working from home 1.4898 0.03426 343 201 116 26
238 I told you we should have opted for a higher floor. 1.4897 0.04015 339 223 66 50
239 Look on the bright side... we got the better end of the deal! 1.4894 0.03764 331 205 90 36
240 I think the shrooms are kicking in.... 1.4880 0.03607 332 200 102 30
241 I swear the landlord said that there was a small draft from the floor below..... 1.4880 0.03452 332 194 114 24
242 The Friendly Giant used to live here. This happens alot. 1.4877 0.04273 326 223 47 56
243 So the guys downstairs asked if we could ease up on the roughage. 1.4863 0.03731 329 203 92 34
244 If this was happening any other year, I'd be shocked. 1.4860 0.03772 321 198 90 33
245 Should we talk about the giraffe in the room? 1.4858 0.03701 317 192 96 29
246 I liked it better when there was an elephant in the room. 1.4857 0.03864 315 199 80 36
247 You see it, too, right? It's not just me? 1.4857 0.03877 315 197 83 35
248 The bad news is, it ate all our plants. The good news is, we got the end that ate all our plants. 1.4846 0.03772 324 201 89 34
249 The condo board is just not asking the tough questions. 1.4843 0.03901 318 201 80 37
250 Rohrshack test or Covid19 elephant, honey? 1.4825 0.04413 315 220 38 57
251 Normally I would call the landlord, but I’m actually liking the company. 1.4825 0.03717 315 192 94 29
252 Those poor guys on the first floor! All we have to do is feed her. 1.4824 0.03815 313 194 87 32
253 I don't know, Sarah. I still think I'd have preferred a TV. 1.4810 0.03841 316 198 84 34
254 Our ostrich is not going to be happy about this. 1.4809 0.03859 314 197 83 34
255 It’s good...but is it art? 1.4808 0.03851 312 195 84 33
256 He had nowhere else to go ofter the Toys 'R' Us bankruptcy." 1.4806 0.04028 310 200 71 39
257 Now aren't you glad we didn't take the first floor apartment? 1.4804 0.03823 306 189 87 30
258 We're never getting our deposit back 1.4793 0.03944 290 180 81 29
259 The neighbors did say it was like a zoo down there. 1.4793 0.04237 217 128 74 15
260 Well, that explains the spotted horse downstairs. 1.4792 0.03921 313 199 78 36
261 At least the guy downstairs gets to clean up the poop 1.4790 0.04481 309 218 34 57
262 Spot was so cute when we thought he was a puppy. 1.4790 0.03878 309 194 82 33
263 I feel like people are starting to take advantage of this “no evictions” thing. 1.4790 0.04089 309 202 66 41
264 They must've built around it 1.4787 0.03997 305 195 74 36
265 Trust me, the apartment downstairs has it worse 1.4787 0.04103 305 199 66 40
266 Should we say something? 1.4784 0.04064 301 194 70 37
267 You're the one who wanted to live in Great Neck! 1.4784 0.03981 301 191 76 34
268 2020 just keeps getting weirder... 1.4783 0.03974 276 177 69 30
269 Goddammit Tyson Foods you can’t just kick an animal to death and call it chicken nuggets ! 1.4771 0.04656 306 223 20 63
270 Remind me to talk to the vet downstairs about working from home. 1.4771 0.04145 306 202 62 42
271 I miss the elephant. 1.4765 0.03896 298 186 82 30
272 That reminds me....your mother called." 1.4765 0.04066 298 192 70 36
273 Look on the bright side - at least we’re only feeding him. 1.4751 0.03662 301 181 97 23
274 I ACED THE COGNITIVE TEST! NO ONE HAS EVER IDENTIFIED A GIRAFFE LIKE I DID! NO ONE COULD BELIEVE IT! 1.4746 0.04343 295 200 50 45
275 ....., but it doesn't look like an elephant! 1.4742 0.04548 291 204 36 51
276 Work both ways. My ostrich likes to check out the people downstairs. 1.4734 0.05443 169 110 38 21
277 312 pages of condo rules and not one of them addresses this! 1.4728 0.03963 294 186 77 31
278 Relax, Fred. We got the better half. 1.4728 0.03814 294 181 87 26
279 So this is why the penthouse was so cheap. 1.4728 0.03874 294 183 83 28
280 These new Cheetah Deer seem to be out of control, we’ll see what HEROS act does about it 1.4726 0.04738 292 213 20 59
281 Let's feed it beans. 1.4724 0.04234 290 192 59 39
282 I thought they were beating the ceiling with a broom this whole time. 1.4720 0.03982 286 180 77 29
283 At least the sawing stopped. 1.4720 0.04104 286 184 69 33
284 I don't know why they couldn't get a dog like everyone else. 1.4706 0.03860 289 179 84 26
285 Better this end than the other. 1.4706 0.03922 289 181 80 28
286 It’s s good deal. We feed it, downstairs cleans up after it. 1.4706 0.04245 289 192 58 39
287 He lives two floors down. 1.4706 0.04159 289 189 64 36
288 Americans view of immigrants in new york. 1.4704 0.04676 287 206 27 54
289 The lease did say partial view. 1.4704 0.03972 287 181 77 29
290 The deal with the Zoo is we just have to feed it. Downstairs has to clean up. 1.4704 0.04239 287 190 59 38
291 I told you not to move the rug. 1.4702 0.04054 285 182 72 31
292 My brownie is kicking in; how 'bout yours? 1.4698 0.04033 281 178 74 29
293 Meh. It's 2020, i don't even care anymore. 1.4698 0.04188 281 183 64 34
294 This time you talk to them. 1.4690 0.04151 258 162 71 25
295 They talked about everything: modern art, city living, minimalist design........everything except the giraffe in the room. 1.4683 0.04359 284 192 51 41
296 Since we never talk about the elephant in the room let’s ignore the giraffe too. 1.4683 0.03986 284 192 56 36
297 In hindsight we should've just given him the Netflix password 1.4681 0.04146 282 183 66 33
298 Well, his head seems to be in the right place. 1.4681 0.04054 282 180 72 30
299 I can't wait until he goes back to work... 1.4676 0.04032 278 176 74 28
300 They said I'd get ahead in NYC, but I thought they meant a promotion. 1.4657 0.03993 277 177 72 28
301 'Relax dear...the government says there is no Giraffe' 1.4655 0.04224 275 180 62 33
302 It's an open floor plan. 1.4652 0.04310 273 181 57 35
303 I think that's the giraffe I saw in the elevator. 1.4652 0.04183 273 177 65 31
304 It's just until the zookeeper downstairs can go back to work. 1.4649 0.03972 271 169 78 24
305 I wish she wouldn’t ignore us. 1.4635 0.04106 274 176 69 29
306 I took champagne to the folks below to get their ok let him in before I cut the hole in the floor and carpet. 1.4635 0.04825 274 200 21 53
307 In a different day and time, I’d have more questions. 1.4635 0.04008 274 173 75 26
308 So much for skipping the condo association meeting... 1.4632 0.03786 272 165 88 19
309 Let’s not talk about it and say we did 1.4632 0.04506 272 187 44 41
310 I miss complaining about their yappy dog. 1.4627 0.04106 268 171 70 27
311 Ah! This might explain the massive spotty testicles in the parking garage. 1.4627 0.04173 268 173 66 29
312 I'm staying here. It's a real zoo downstairs. 1.4624 0.04162 266 171 67 28
313 He’s still a better neighbor than the elephants above us. 1.4624 0.04263 266 174 61 31
314 I told you we should have taken deforestation and climate change seriously. 1.4615 0.05105 169 107 46 16
315 At least he doesn't wake us any more with his banging on the ceiling 1.4610 0.04195 269 175 64 30
316 The apartment is much quieter since we cut the hole. 1.4601 0.04161 263 169 67 27
317 We probably should’ve charged more to sublet the airspace in our apartment. 1.4601 0.04497 263 179 47 37
318 Well, now we know what the hole is for. 1.4598 0.03855 261 159 84 18
319 Trust me, the guy downstairs has it much worse. 1.4598 0.04149 261 167 68 26
320 Meet "Stretch", my emotional support pet. 1.4595 0.03380 259 181 51 27
321 These Zoom safaris are incredible. 1.4586 0.04229 266 174 62 30
322 Siri, open Zoom, not Zoo. 1.4583 0.03972 264 165 77 22
323 What I do mind is watching Animal Planet every time he pops in. 1.4583 0.04184 264 171 65 28
324 Of course, as soon as the exterminator leaves there it is again 1.4583 0.04184 264 171 65 28
325 A year ago, I would’ve found this shocking 1.4580 0.04207 262 170 64 28
326 I can't take this anymore, I am going to say something. 1.4577 0.04015 260 163 75 22
327 We certainly got the better end of that deal! 1.4574 0.04428 258 173 52 33
328 Why do I always have to sit behind the giraffe? 1.4574 0.04290 258 169 60 29
329 When did she get a say in what we watch? 1.4571 0.04147 245 154 70 21
330 At least we got the easy to clean half. 1.4567 0.04119 254 161 70 23
331 it looks like Jeffrey is back in business! 1.4567 0.04880 254 183 26 45
332 It’s honestly just nice to have company over again. 1.4567 0.04267 254 165 62 27
333 2020 humans hope there’s nothing else pEAking out 1.4567 0.04943 254 185 22 47
334 He has the air rights. 1.4549 0.04144 255 163 68 24
335 Honestly Janet, I thought neckdoor neighbour was just a typo on the lease!! 1.4549 0.04326 255 168 58 29
336 Having a pet giraffe sounded a lot cooler when we were stoned. 1.4549 0.04254 255 166 62 27
337 Is the giraffe new? 1.4545 0.04493 253 171 49 33
338 She does this every time Wild Kingdom airs. 1.4545 0.03935 253 156 79 18
339 After a while, you don't really notice it 1.4542 0.03875 251 153 82 16
340 :It seemed like a nice name--Serengeti Townhomes" 1.4538 0.04177 249 159 67 23
341 You wanna neck? 1.4538 0.04291 249 162 61 26
342 I think I'm seeing spotty. 1.4538 0.04989 249 182 21 46
343 This giraffe really ties the room together. 1.4528 0.04002 254 159 75 20
344 What really worries me is that we're on the ground floor. 1.4524 0.04400 252 168 54 30
345 So glad we didn't take that apartment below us. 1.4524 0.04253 252 164 62 26
346 They sure do grow up fast, don’t they? 1.4516 0.04265 248 161 62 25
347 When you said you lived above a watering hole I assumed you meant a bar. 1.4516 0.04109 248 157 70 21
348 We should never have moved above Toys R Us 1.4516 0.04303 248 162 60 26
349 Even the zookeeper is working from home. 1.4516 0.04265 248 161 62 25
350 Well, at least he’s a Democrat. 1.4512 0.04367 246 162 57 27
351 We did ask for an open floorplan. 1.4508 0.04236 244 157 64 23
352 That was Herbal tea,right? 1.4508 0.03905 244 169 48 27
353 It's a long story. 1.4508 0.04315 244 159 60 25
354 We have to feed it, but they have to clean up after it. 1.4504 0.04458 242 161 53 28
355 New rule, no wine at the next art auction. 1.4504 0.04534 242 163 49 30
356 I guess we should have made more of an effort to attend the zoning code variance hearing. 1.4498 0.04617 249 172 42 35
357 Next time when a neighbour asks you to help them with their pet, just say "No!", will you? 1.4498 0.04175 249 160 66 23
358 It's not that you got the giraffe, it's that you didn't ask me first 1.4498 0.04175 249 160 66 23
359 The stay-at-home safari is more realistic than I expected. 1.4490 0.04223 245 158 64 23
360 I kind of miss the elephant in the room, don't you? 1.4490 0.04302 245 160 60 25
361 It's not so bad. They have a horse's ass next door. 1.4486 0.04557 243 165 47 31
362 Thank God we got the top half! 1.4481 0.04273 241 156 62 23
363 I guess that virtual walk through was misleading. 1.4477 0.04298 239 155 61 23
364 I told you he’s upset—he won’t even look at us anymore. 1.4477 0.04089 239 150 71 18
365 Well, technically it is his Netflix account. 1.4473 0.04198 237 151 66 20
366 We could give one of our netflix profiles, if you wanted. You know that Jeff, right? 1.4473 0.05119 237 175 18 44
367 Otherwise, they're pretty good neighbors. 1.4464 0.04085 224 138 72 14
368 You can't think of a better name than Spot? Really? 1.4458 0.03879 240 164 52 24
369 This is some good LSD. 1.4458 0.04444 240 160 53 27
370 We're going to need some plants. 1.4454 0.04432 238 158 54 26
371 I told you, ONE more and we’ll be the ‘crazy giraffe people!’ 1.4449 0.04167 236 150 67 19
372 Given the choice, I prefer to have the head. 1.4449 0.04210 236 151 65 20
373 I'm glad he removed his hat. 1.4449 0.04809 236 166 35 35
374 If he’s able to cover half the rent, I can work around him. 1.4449 0.04167 236 150 67 19
375 Glad he enjoys PBS 1.4449 0.04167 236 150 67 19
376 Yeah... I should have read the Airbnb reviews more closely 1.4449 0.04378 236 155 57 24
377 When I said a “conversation piece” I was thinking more like a lava lamp. 1.4440 0.04390 232 152 57 23
378 Honey, do you see what I’m seeing?! He’s not wearing a mask! 1.4440 0.03870 232 158 52 22
379 No, what I said was “we should consult the graph” 1.4440 0.04347 232 151 59 22
380 On the plus side, the reception has improved. 1.4435 0.04460 230 152 54 24
381 At least we got the better end 1.4435 0.04417 230 151 56 23
382 are we gonna talk about the giraffe in the room? 1.4435 0.04374 230 150 58 22
383 When did you first notice it? 1.4421 0.04246 233 150 63 20
384 Do you think he knows he's adopted? 1.4419 0.05097 172 113 42 17
385 Well, you said I could have a pet if I kept it in the basement.” 1.4416 0.04359 231 151 58 22
386 How do I always end up sitting behind the tallest guy in the place? 1.4416 0.04402 231 152 56 23
387 Hopefully they zoos will reopen soon and he can go back to work 1.4416 0.04316 231 150 60 21
388 And I really can't explain how that hole follows her around. 1.4414 0.05526 145 95 36 14
389 When they said it was pet friendly, I thought they meant our pet. 1.4410 0.04253 229 147 63 19
390 Gerri, please look at us. Until we can afford a loft, this is the only way we can keep you. 1.4405 0.04458 227 150 54 23
391 Yeah, we only feed it. Poor guys downstairs. 1.4405 0.04234 227 145 64 18
392 Can you imagine if we booked for the "supernatural" hotel experience? 1.4405 0.04875 227 160 34 33
393 Works both ways, actually. My ostrich likes to check out the people downstairs. 1.4400 0.04442 225 148 55 22
394 I never thought HD would be this realistic! 1.4397 0.04635 232 159 44 29
395 Let’s move the couch, I can’t see the screen. 1.4389 0.04499 221 146 53 22
396 If we feed it, he'll keep coming back. 1.4386 0.03935 228 150 60 18
397 We really have to start attending those Co-op board meetings! 1.4386 0.04355 228 149 58 21
398 All we need now is for the upstairs neighbors to get an ostrich... 1.4381 0.04426 226 154 47 25
399 Ring toss?. 1.4381 0.04514 226 151 51 24
400 I didn’t expect this when we told the downstairs neighbors we didn’t mind if they got a pet. 1.4371 0.04992 167 108 45 14
401 I can't, he swallowed the remote. 1.4369 0.04483 222 147 53 22
402 I told you it wouldn't fit when we were at the store 1.4369 0.04483 222 147 53 22
403 Covid Zoo. Now the animals come to you 1.4364 0.04513 220 146 52 22
404 To be fair, the lease only said ‘no dogs allowed’” 1.4364 0.04420 220 144 56 20
405 I liked it better when it was an elephant! 1.4358 0.05028 218 156 29 33
406 Remember how many times we fell in there when he was a baby? 1.4358 0.04303 218 140 61 17
407 Well, it beats living under the hole two floors down 1.4358 0.04986 218 155 31 32
408 Well at least we got the half you only have to feed. 1.4358 0.04254 218 139 63 16
409 I don't know, Moira, I guess this is what happens when Trickle Down loses its Workforce--no Base, just a trophy relic of a Crude, bygone age. 1.4356 0.05220 225 168 16 41
410 We could mention it to the lions in 6B and just see what happens. 1.4350 0.04283 223 144 61 18
411 We can’t, he’s an emotional support animal. 1.4344 0.04587 221 149 48 24
412 I remember when she was just a teething toy. 1.4338 0.04617 219 148 47 24
413 He always pops up for Jeopardy. 1.4338 0.04479 219 145 53 21
414 You said 'zoo penthouse' would be great! 1.4338 0.05051 219 158 27 34
415 He’s blocking Sean Hannity. I feel better than ever. 1.4338 0.04839 219 153 37 29
416 She just bought the building, act normal. 1.4332 0.04087 217 138 65 14
417 I just promised to watch him until FAO Schwarz reopens. 1.4326 0.04292 215 138 61 16
418 I'm telling you, if you change the channel he'll leave. 1.4319 0.04471 213 140 54 19
419 Let's just focus on what we have in common as African-Americans. 1.4319 0.04569 213 142 50 21
420 It’s when she’s not there is when the hole is a problem 1.4319 0.04471 213 140 54 19
421 Problem is, if I whack it down here, it'll just pop up again in the kitchen or bathroom. 1.4313 0.04322 211 138 56 17
422 Every Airbnb has its quirks. 1.4313 0.04348 211 136 59 16
423 So he can do whatever this is but we can't paint our walls? 1.4313 0.04348 211 136 59 16
424 I really wish he'd get his own Netflix account. 1.4306 0.04522 216 144 51 21
425 I only donated to get the calendar!" 1.4299 0.04694 214 146 44 24
426 Well, you were the one complaining about that bonking noise coming from downstairs. 1.4299 0.05011 214 153 30 31
427 Living in a converted Fire House is not without its surprises. 1.4299 0.04455 214 141 54 19
428 I think we need to talk about the giraffe in the room. 1.4293 0.04870 198 135 41 22
429 At least it got rid of the elephant. 1.4292 0.04631 212 143 47 22
430 He seems to know when Wild Kingdom is on. 1.4292 0.04484 212 140 53 19
431 Well, at least we don't have to clean up after it. 1.4286 0.04463 210 138 54 18
432 Neighbor downstairs is a zookeeper. He's working from home during COVID19." 1.4286 0.04564 210 140 50 20
433 Now I'm thinking I liked it better over by the kitchen doorway. 1.4286 0.04463 210 138 54 18
434 I tried adjusting the antennas but it's still spotty. 1.4279 0.04646 208 140 47 21
435 Then again, sometimes a giraffe is just a giraffe. 1.4279 0.04695 208 141 45 22
436 I know he's the landlord, but he has to stop popping in unannounced. 1.4279 0.04769 208 150 30 28
437 At least we have a better view than the people downstairs! 1.4272 0.04364 206 138 50 18
438 I'd like to get rid of it but it's load bearing. 1.4272 0.04728 206 140 44 22
439 Tucker Carlson says that it will just disappear... 1.4272 0.04678 206 139 46 21
440 ‘He should really be wearing a mask’ 1.4272 0.04728 206 140 44 22
441 I thought we were on the ground floor 1.4272 0.05113 206 148 28 30
442 At least we won the heads vs tails coin toss with the neighbors. 1.4265 0.04103 211 140 55 16
443 Yeah, but up here we only need to feed her. 1.4265 0.04497 211 140 52 19
444 Well, it's better than having a hole in his head. 1.4265 0.05381 204 152 17 35
445 It was called the 'Serengeti Special' on Airbnb. 1.4264 0.04886 197 135 40 22
446 I thought you said this place was a “hole in the wall”... 1.4258 0.04346 209 138 54 17
447 Karen, I told you, the Elephant was out of stock 1.4258 0.05190 209 153 23 33
448 On the positive side, our neighbors downstairs have it worse. 1.4251 0.04401 207 135 56 16
449 I thought 'spare ruminant' was just a typo. 1.4251 0.04735 207 144 39 24
450 Well, most of him is six feet away. 1.4251 0.04427 207 138 51 18
451 Could be George the Giraffe ... could be Gina the Giraffe. Hard to tell from here. 1.4251 0.04710 207 141 44 22
452 Well, Gladys, you have to admit it takes up less space than an elephant in the room. 1.4251 0.04710 207 141 44 22
453 The people downstairs asked if we could try more fibre this week. 1.4245 0.04628 212 144 46 22
454 'We love to see you,' you said. 'Pop in anytime,' you said. 1.4229 0.04811 201 138 41 22
455 Well I'll be. Something is actually higher than the rent. 1.4229 0.04435 201 131 55 15
456 I think I prefer the coffee table. 1.4229 0.04759 201 137 43 21
457 Yes dear, we have a problem, but the couple below us have a much bigger one. 1.4229 0.04378 201 130 57 14
458 On the bright side, we just have to feed her. 1.4229 0.04707 201 136 45 20
459 What am I supposed to do about it, Sarah? She’s on the board of the co-op! 1.4229 0.04654 201 135 47 19
460 If he sees his shadow, it’s six more weeks of lockdown. 1.4221 0.04577 199 132 50 17
461 We really need to start reading the fine print in our lease agreements. 1.4221 0.04408 199 129 56 14
462 I appreciate the clean, tapered lines, but those spots are overly derivative of a tired, outdated expressionism. 1.4221 0.04687 199 134 46 19
463 It's just a few weeks honey. Just until Toys R Us brings him back from furlough. 1.4208 0.04418 202 132 55 15
464 When I moved in, I figured who cares if I have a three-month-old giraffe living downstairs... 1.4208 0.04528 202 134 51 17
465 The president said that if we have a giraffe in our house we can’t get infected. 1.4208 0.04843 202 140 39 23
466 I’d like to discuss the elephant in the room. 1.4208 0.04528 202 134 51 17
467 This is what happens when the Republicans defund national parks! 1.4208 0.04792 202 139 41 22
468 ...all valid points, but my biggest issue is that now we can only eat salads standing up in the kitchen. 1.4208 0.05187 202 147 25 30
469 He hasn't been the same since the ToysRUs bankruptcy. 1.4200 0.04614 200 134 48 18
470 Partially obstructed view or not, I’m so excited to finally get to see Hamilton 1.4200 0.04503 200 132 52 16
471 We should never have sold air rights to the downstairs neighbors. 1.4192 0.04420 198 129 55 14
472 I told World Wildlife Fund we didn't want another tote bag. 1.4184 0.04680 196 132 46 18
473 I didn't say anything when they got the rhinoceros, but this is ridiculous. 1.4175 0.04481 194 127 53 14
474 Are we going to talk about how the elephant in the room is actually a giraffe? 1.4175 0.04770 194 132 43 19
475 Do we have any acacia branches in the pantry? 1.4167 0.04861 192 132 40 20
476 I need another Giraffe like I need a hole in my floor! 1.4167 0.04748 192 130 44 18
477 My zookeeper neighbor downstairs is working from home. 1.4167 0.04264 192 122 60 10
478 Well we ignored the elephant in the room last week. 1.4167 0.04134 192 140 32 20
479 Today’s Headline: Trump tweets claim that an increase in indoor Giraffe sightings is a sign we are beating the virus 1.4167 0.04805 192 131 42 19
480 I think I like the couch better next to the water buffalo. 1.4167 0.04690 192 129 46 17
481 My neck’s been killing me since I moved to the city. So, what brings you guys to the chiropractor? 1.4167 0.04805 192 131 42 19
482 Turns out there’s a fine line between ironic and regrettable. 1.4162 0.04314 197 127 58 12
483 No dear, I explicitly recall speaking with the woman from “Welcome Wagon,” not “Circus Wagon!” 1.4162 0.05285 197 145 22 30
484 We should have taken the penthouse. 1.4162 0.04433 197 129 54 14
485 This city has become an absolute zoo. 1.4158 0.03847 190 132 44 14
486 I thought it was a misspelling in the lease - Split level zooplex. 1.4158 0.04898 190 131 39 20
487 Should we also he worried about the elephant in the room?” 1.4158 0.05488 190 142 17 31
488 When you said your neighbor would stick his neck out for us, I was expecting something else. 1.4158 0.04841 190 130 41 19
489 Still think we got the better end of this deal. 1.4158 0.04605 190 126 49 15
490 And I thought our last neighbors were intrusive 1.4158 0.04724 190 128 45 17
491 Enunciate the next time you ask to borrow Harry's carafe. 1.4154 0.04694 195 132 45 18
492 Just a heads up we have giraffe problem. 1.4154 0.04580 195 130 49 16
493 The good news is that we just have to feed him. 1.4154 0.04637 195 131 47 17
494 The new neighbors said they downsized, but they kept what sparked joy. 1.4154 0.04637 195 131 47 17
495 Can we address the 800 lb gorilla in the room? 1.4149 0.05377 188 138 22 28
496 I guess we better get some houseplants. 1.4149 0.04759 188 127 44 17
497 That’s my downstairs neighbor. He pokes his head in sometimes just to see what’s up. 1.4149 0.04514 188 123 52 13
498 Doc, you say we should ‘address the elephant in the room’... So we’re just gonna ignore the giraffe? 1.4149 0.04638 188 125 48 15
499 In retrospect, it was a big mistake letting her in to watch tv with us when she was just a calf. 1.4145 0.05112 193 138 30 25
500 Sure, finding enough leaves for him to eat will be time consuming, but I still say we got the better half. 1.4145 0.04310 193 124 58 11
501 A little more for that third floor apartment seems worth it now. 1.4144 0.04953 181 124 39 18
502 I guess shelter-at-home is harder for some of us than others. 1.4136 0.04464 191 125 53 13
503 I guess the Larsons downstairs got a new pet. 1.4136 0.05310 191 140 23 28
504 They were out of rescue dogs. 1.4136 0.04586 191 127 49 15
505 Well, the listing said one bedroom live giraffe, two thousand a month, vegetarians only. 1.4136 0.05044 191 135 33 23
506 Honey, are we going to address the giraffe in the room? 1.4136 0.04646 191 128 47 16
507 Yes, we do have to feed it, but I’m sure glad we don’t live downstairs! 1.4136 0.04646 191 128 47 16
508 I should have asked the neighbor what he did when he said he brings his work home with him. 1.4136 0.04877 191 132 39 20
509 I thought you were using concrete jungle metaphorically. 1.4133 0.04562 196 131 49 16
510 I have some bad news. We can't deal with a giraffe roommate anymore. I hope you were sitting down for that. 1.4127 0.05353 189 139 22 28
511 I’m SO glad we got the upstairs apartment. 1.4118 0.04775 187 127 43 17
512 Maybe if we switch from ‘Planet Earth’ to ‘CNN,’ it will leave on its own. 1.4118 0.04775 187 127 43 17
513 -“Do you see what I see? Yeah, where is his mask? 1.4118 0.04653 187 125 47 15
514 If we place a few shrubs near the couch, she can feed herself while we're at work. 1.4098 0.04560 183 123 46 14
515 On the other hand, it's as close to the outdoors as we'll be for awhile 1.4098 0.04593 183 121 49 13
516 He is a good pet, but is it art? 1.4098 0.04970 183 127 37 19
517 Thanks for the heads-up. 1.4098 0.05089 183 129 33 21
518 The whole zoo is working from home. 1.4098 0.04909 183 126 39 18
519 ..and he's got the remote. 1.4098 0.04722 183 123 45 15
520 if we each had right arms we could hug him 1.4098 0.05030 183 128 35 20
521 This is 2020, why wouldn’t there be a giraffe in our living room? 1.4098 0.04785 183 124 43 16
522 I thought they meant the kids when they said: ‘Our house has turned into a zoo since Covid-19’. 1.4098 0.04393 183 118 55 10
523 We really did get the better end of the pet share. 1.4096 0.04633 188 126 47 15
524 This is the least strange thing to happen in 2020 1.4088 0.05009 181 126 36 19
525 This neighborhood watch is getting out of hand. 1.4088 0.05588 181 136 16 29
526 I thought that was just your Zoom background. 1.4088 0.04947 181 125 38 18
527 I need to speak to the elephant in the room! 1.4086 0.05627 186 142 12 32
528 I know that bargain condo downstairs has low ceilings, but this is still too much! 1.4086 0.05523 186 140 16 30
529 I wish we owned more hats... 1.4086 0.04969 186 130 36 20
530 Well, that explains our missing ficus. 1.4086 0.04667 186 125 46 15
531 This still isn’t the craziest thing that’s happened this week. 1.4086 0.04729 186 126 44 16
532 As a hole I could fix it; but as an ecological niche...my hands are tied 1.4076 0.04764 184 125 43 16
533 I hate to think what the couple below us is looking at. 1.4066 0.04925 182 126 38 18
534 The quarantine didn't really get bad until the zookeeper started working from home. 1.4066 0.04800 182 124 42 16
535 Did you hear? Toys “R” Us’ bankruptcy attorneys have rented the office downstairs. 1.4056 0.04773 180 122 43 15
536 I just think letting him watch Animal Planet is setting a bad precedent. 1.4056 0.04707 180 121 45 14
537 Next time gotta read the lease more carefully. 1.4056 0.04574 180 119 49 12
538 Just give him a treat anyway. I'm sure he sat. 1.4056 0.04707 180 121 45 14
539 Now I’m thinking the place with the big backyard would have been better. 1.4056 0.05148 180 128 31 21
540 We have the duty to feed him, which is better than the duty the Johnson's have. 1.4056 0.04574 180 119 49 12
541 An obstructed view of the screen isn’t my biggest concern, actually. 1.4056 0.05026 180 126 35 19
542 We definitely shouldn't have skipped that co-op vote. 1.4056 0.05088 180 127 33 20
543 Big game night! 1.4056 0.04707 180 121 45 14
544 I don’t care if his brother has a small part. We are not watching Doctor Doolittle again 1.4056 0.05026 180 126 35 19
545 We now know what the hole in the floor is for. 1.4045 0.04607 178 118 48 12
546 I told room service I wanted a "carafe". I am not tipping him. 1.4045 0.04875 178 122 40 16
547 Like I've always said . . . one man's ceiling is another man's floor. 1.4045 0.05311 178 129 26 23
548 The Elephant in the Room suite was $50 more per night. 1.4045 0.04776 178 123 39 16
549 We should help him; he stuck his neck out for us. 1.4045 0.04743 178 120 44 14
550 But I think we got the better end of the deal. 1.4045 0.04607 178 118 48 12
551 The new guys name, in 3b, is Noah. 1.4045 0.04875 178 122 40 16
552 Yeah, he said he might drop up for lunch. 1.4045 0.05602 178 134 16 28
553 Air BnB photos can be so deceptive. 1.4045 0.05004 178 124 36 18
554 She just wants to watch the episode about her family on National Geographic. 1.4045 0.04875 178 122 40 16
555 we probably should have fixed that hole. 1.4045 0.04676 178 119 46 13
556 The building only specified no dogs 1.4045 0.04940 178 123 38 17
557 Listen, we’ll get to that. But yay or nay on the petit goatee? 1.4045 0.05129 178 126 32 20
558 Let's not renew National Geographic this year. 1.4043 0.04825 141 90 45 6
559 It’s a little inconvenient but I’d rather live above a circus than beneath one. 1.4034 0.05233 176 126 29 21
560 I know this is not ideal, but at least we have a better view than the couple in the apartment below us. 1.4034 0.04571 176 116 49 11
561 I'm worried we'll regret this when quarantine is over. 1.4034 0.04711 176 118 45 13
562 I don’t know about you but I can’t wait til our neighbor goes back to work. 1.4034 0.05044 176 123 35 18
563 It’s a ghost hologram from Toys “R" Us 1.4034 0.05651 176 133 15 28
564 Can you believe the condo board denied our new door knocker? 1.4034 0.04979 176 122 37 17
565 Remember when we complained about having mice? 1.4034 0.04779 176 119 43 14
566 They said that we couldn't miss getting to meet our neighbors. 1.4034 0.05708 176 134 13 29
567 Please tell me you see that too...?” 1.4034 0.04779 176 119 43 14
568 Well, what did you think "quarantine safari" meant? 1.4034 0.04711 176 118 45 13
569 I’m changing my mind on leopard-print upholstery for this couch. 1.4034 0.04500 176 115 51 10
570 Martha from downstairs called. You were right - it’s lactose intolerant. 1.4034 0.05108 176 124 33 19
571 Why did you cut a hole in the floor in the first place? 1.4034 0.05171 176 125 31 20
572 I think we got the better half of the deal. 1.4034 0.04427 176 114 53 9
573 I mean it does give something when watching wildlife documentaries. 1.4034 0.05593 176 132 17 27
574 It is a bit annoying, but our TV reception has improved. 1.4034 0.04711 176 118 45 13
575 I told him he could watch Hamilton with us 1.4034 0.04847 176 120 41 15
576 She's looking for the elephant in the room. 1.4034 0.04779 176 119 43 14
577 It’s definitely a conversation piece, but was it ethically sourced? 1.4034 0.04913 176 121 39 16
578 Sure he loves Animal Planet now but wait till the lions come on! 1.4033 0.04417 181 118 53 10
579 I'm just glad we don't live one floor down. 1.4023 0.04953 174 120 38 16
580 Look at the bright side: it could have been the other end. 1.4023 0.04605 174 115 48 11
581 I'm just glad that I don't have the apartment four floors down. 1.4023 0.04953 174 120 38 16
582 can we please talk about the giraffe in the room? 1.4023 0.05085 174 122 34 18
583 No, I'd rather move the couch. 1.4022 0.04518 179 118 50 11
584 I guess he was under twenty-five pounds when they signed the lease. 1.4022 0.04587 179 119 48 12
585 It was either this or the one with the tiger. 1.4022 0.05105 179 127 32 20
586 You’re an inspiration sir. I wonder; might you be willing to assist us with our glass ceiling? 1.4012 0.05693 172 130 15 27
587 Babe, I think the edibles are kicking in." 1.4012 0.04993 172 119 37 16
588 I feed him a laxative whenever the people below get noisy. 1.4012 0.04713 172 115 45 12
589 And here I thought we were in therapy to discuss the elephant in the room! 1.4012 0.05258 172 123 29 20
590 I am not calling your sister a liar, but I just don't think she really tried to get an apartment in this building. 1.4012 0.05693 172 130 15 27
591 The zoo keeper is working from home again. 1.4012 0.04784 172 116 43 13
592 Even during lockdown, the cinema experience was ruined by a tall bloke blocking our view 1.4012 0.04640 172 114 47 11
593 I guess even zoo keepers are working from home. 1.4012 0.04640 172 114 47 11
594 Well, it's less fraught with innuendo than the elephant. 1.4011 0.04825 177 121 41 15
595 Can you believe that I use to look up to him? 1.4011 0.05566 177 133 17 27
596 This is the only I can watch the news... in a zoo 1.4011 0.05624 177 134 15 28
597 I'm not sure if it's art, or a problem. 1.4011 0.04825 177 121 41 15
598 We only got the place when another buyer fell through! 1.4011 0.04621 177 118 47 12
599 All things considered I think we got the better end of the deal. 1.4000 0.04795 175 119 42 14
600 One of us has to run for the condo board. 1.4000 0.04656 175 117 46 12
601 Well, we WERE told that this building is pet friendly. 1.3988 0.04619 173 115 47 11
602 Are you seeing spots? 1.3988 0.05188 163 114 33 16
603 We're going to need more houseplants. 1.3986 0.05074 143 95 39 9
604 So…what kind of therapy is this again? 1.3977 0.05145 171 121 32 18
605 What happens when he wants to go for a walk? 1.3977 0.04870 171 117 40 14
606 I still say we got the better end of the deal 1.3977 0.04941 171 118 38 15
607 I don’t know if it’s art, but I like it. 1.3977 0.05010 171 119 36 16
608 How are we just noticing him? 1.3977 0.04654 171 114 46 11
609 I think we got the better end of the deal. 1.3964 0.04837 169 115 41 13
610 I still think we should have got a dog. 1.3964 0.03956 169 124 31 14
611 Well this isn't the necking I had planned on. 1.3964 0.05051 169 118 35 16
612 I read the bylaws three times and it's not a violation. 1.3964 0.04837 169 115 41 13
613 We might need to get a couple of housekeepers for the first floor. 1.3964 0.04837 169 115 41 13
614 They did say they were giving us a heads up about their new pet. 1.3964 0.04981 169 117 37 15
615 Do they make a matching area rug with a hole in it? 1.3964 0.04764 169 114 43 12
616 Apparently this building used to be an FAO Schwarz 1.3964 0.05323 169 122 27 20
617 Apartments should either have 15 foot ceilings or make people with giraffes rent the top floors. 1.3952 0.05233 167 119 30 18
618 To be honest, I am more concerned about the hippos upstairs. 1.3952 0.04950 167 115 38 14
619 If I knew the Co-op board was so lenient about pets, I would have petitioned to have a dog. 1.3952 0.04950 167 115 38 14
620 It’s so much better watching these nature documentaries live 1.3952 0.04726 167 112 44 11
621 I told you we were going to regret the building's liberal pet policy 1.3952 0.04802 167 113 42 12
622 So myself, I'm generally more of a dog person. 1.3952 0.04726 167 112 44 11
623 My landlord doesn’t allow dogs. 1.3939 0.05064 165 115 35 15
624 They really do have lovely eyelashes. 1.3939 0.04840 165 112 41 12
625 They call it a zooplex, I think. I kinda dig it. You? 1.3929 0.05525 140 98 29 13
626 Yeah, I gotta feed him. But it's better than what the guy downstairs is stuck with. 1.3926 0.05107 163 114 34 15
627 The broker didn't mention this in the walkthrough. 1.3926 0.05669 163 122 18 23
628 What giraffe? 1.3920 0.06000 125 89 23 13
629 When is Geoffrey going to find his own place? It's been two years. 1.3913 0.05075 161 112 35 14
630 This would be way worse if I had the apartment one floor down. 1.3913 0.05075 161 112 35 14
631 At least she won't bark when the doorbell rings. 1.3913 0.05075 161 112 35 14
632 So, are we responsible for the feeding???? 1.3913 0.05987 161 125 9 27
633 This is whose idea of a "lockdown sofari". . . 1.3913 0.04998 161 111 37 13
634 Can we get the elephant back? 1.3913 0.04998 161 111 37 13
635 I always said nature shows would be the best reality TV. 1.3913 0.05856 161 123 13 25
636 Well, they are better neighbors than the elephants upstairs. 1.3913 0.04920 161 110 39 12
637 Can we watch something other than Animal Planet? 1.3913 0.04998 161 111 37 13
638 To be fair, the previous tenant had that dog the wouldn’t stop barking 1.3913 0.04677 161 112 37 12
639 Well, at least we won't have to care about the downstairs duty 1.3913 0.05585 161 119 21 21
640 Guess we won’t be using those vouchers to travel Africa 1.3913 0.05856 161 123 13 25
641 I'm glad we got the head end. 1.3910 0.04946 156 106 39 11
642 i’ve heard of neighbors being party animals but this is ridiculous .. 1.3907 0.05396 151 107 29 15
643 As if there aren't enough reasons to leave New York City. 1.3902 0.04932 164 113 38 13
644 They have it registered as a Service Animal, so there’s nothing we can do about it. 1.3899 0.05347 159 114 28 17
645 To be honest, I kinda miss the elephant. 1.3896 0.05155 154 107 34 13
646 At least he’s blocking the news 1.3893 0.05447 149 106 28 15
647 Just make sure to change the channel if you see a lion or hyena. 1.3889 0.04895 162 111 39 12
648 Wow, and I thought the tap dancing upstairs was a problem. 1.3889 0.04816 162 110 41 11
649 I hope you're OK with the hole I cut. He wanted to be in the room where it happens. 1.3889 0.04895 162 111 39 12
650 Necks year will be better 1.3889 0.05272 162 116 29 17
651 It all started when Billy got a hamster. 1.3878 0.05058 147 100 37 10
652 I don't mind being neighborly, but can't he get his own TV? 1.3875 0.05169 160 113 32 15
653 I think we should say something. 1.3875 0.05392 160 116 26 18
654 I’m so glad we ended up with this half. 1.3875 0.05015 160 111 36 13
655 I’m a little worried that the condo association will find out now that she’s grown up. 1.3875 0.05093 160 112 34 14
656 Let’s look at the bright side, at least we’re on the top floor. 1.3875 0.04432 160 104 50 6
657 Well, yes, I guess it did say "adopt a giraffe for only $8 a month". 1.3861 0.04977 158 109 37 12
658 So..this is what Geoffrey been up to. 1.3861 0.06072 158 124 7 27
659 Don't you think the installation of this room is much better than the below one's? 1.3861 0.05937 158 122 11 25
660 Now I know why they started a No Pets policy. 1.3861 0.04728 158 106 43 9
661 On a higher floor, we could probably have a regular coffee table..... 1.3861 0.04554 158 104 47 7
662 It looked smaller in the catalogue 1.3861 0.04642 158 105 45 8
663 It really does tie the room together. 1.3861 0.05137 158 111 33 14
664 Seriously? We just got rid of the elephant. 1.3861 0.04977 158 109 37 12
665 Sure, I have to feed it, but the guy downstairs has it worse. 1.3851 0.04498 161 106 48 7
666 Does the zoo come with the rental fee, hon? 1.3851 0.05849 161 124 12 25
667 I have to admit, they found an original way to say, “Go back to Africa!” 1.3846 0.05339 156 112 28 16
668 I miss Eva Hesse. 1.3846 0.06064 156 122 8 26
669 It was a little more expensive to be two floors up. But I think I got the better end of the deal 1.3846 0.04678 156 104 44 8
670 At least he's paying half the cable bill. 1.3846 0.05856 156 119 14 23
671 I told you we shouldn't lease an apartment built above a closed Toys R Us store. 1.3846 0.04589 156 103 46 7
672 I don't know why we always have to always watch Animal Planet just because he wants to. 1.3846 0.05182 156 110 32 14
673 I thought she said the hole would let a draft in. 1.3846 0.05020 156 108 36 12
674 So that’s where our potted plants have been going! 1.3846 0.05339 156 112 28 16
675 And all WE have to do is feed him. 1.3846 0.05020 156 108 36 12
676 When the decorator suggested adding an animal print, I assumed she meant a rug or tapestry 1.3846 0.05101 156 109 34 13
677 Did Noah move back in ? 1.3846 0.05416 156 113 26 17
678 So, you promised him any pet he wanted if he would do his school work? 1.3846 0.04936 156 107 38 11
679 I said we would watch her while they were away. 1.3846 0.05101 156 109 34 13
680 Wall mounts are so last season. 1.3846 0.05101 156 109 34 13
681 honey, we agreed to not talk about him behind his neck 1.3846 0.04936 156 107 38 11
682 No matter where I sit, someone taller always sits in front of me! 1.3836 0.05110 159 112 33 14
683 It’s your turn to walk her. 1.3836 0.05187 159 113 31 15
684 Can you believe it sat unrented for almost 2 years? I really lucked out. 1.3836 0.05258 146 102 32 12
685 It’s not quite like the “elephant in the room”. 1.3831 0.04978 154 106 37 11
686 Thank God we didn’t take the downstairs apartment..... 1.3831 0.05063 154 107 35 12
687 I wish she'd just just get her own Netflix account 1.3831 0.05063 154 107 35 12
688 On the upside, we're only responsible for what goes in 1.3831 0.04437 154 105 41 8
689 Now he expects us to watch Animal Planet with him every time he turns up! 1.3831 0.04978 154 106 37 11
690 We definitely should've gone with a cocktail table instead. 1.3831 0.05063 154 107 35 12
691 He finally broke through the grass ceiling! 1.3831 0.05146 154 108 33 13
692 I think we got the better end of this deal than the folks downstairs. 1.3831 0.02942 154 112 35 7
693 I guess the zookeeper also started working from home. 1.3831 0.05063 154 107 35 12
694 So far, so good. No elephant in the room. 1.3831 0.05228 154 109 31 14
695 Well I held it and it brought me joy... 1.3831 0.05063 154 107 35 12
696 I didn't think they literally meant headroom for a giraffe. 1.3831 0.04892 154 105 39 10
697 It’s probably here due to loss of habitat. 1.3822 0.04827 157 107 40 10
698 I think we're going to need some side tables. 1.3822 0.04742 157 106 42 9
699 Soon as Rachel Maddox is over, back down she goes. 1.3822 0.04911 157 108 38 11
700 When you said your building was a real zoo you weren't kidding. 1.3822 0.05233 157 112 30 15
701 The downstairs neighbors deal with all the crap. 1.3822 0.04742 157 106 42 9
702 Nah the landlord said we can’t move her—she’s load bearing. 1.3822 0.05154 157 111 32 14
703 In my defense, ‘pet-friendly hotels now open’ and ‘Bronx zoo to quarantine vulnerable animals’ were two very distant dots to connect. 1.3819 0.05487 144 103 27 14
704 I told you we should read the fine print on the lease. 1.3816 0.04845 152 103 40 9
705 Give it some time, you'll get why the rent is higher here than for the apartment below. 1.3816 0.05021 152 105 36 11
706 Get an exotic pet, you said. Renting an additional unit downstairs will be easy, you said. 1.3816 0.05192 152 107 32 13
707 Do you think the neighbors will mind if we feed it? 1.3816 0.04661 152 106 36 10
708 No, you said YOU read the lease! 1.3816 0.04845 152 103 40 9
709 Who else has our Netflix password? 1.3816 0.05275 152 108 30 14
710 I told you that their pet policy was way too lenient. 1.3816 0.04661 152 101 44 7
711 Of course I love him... I'm just saying that with a dog we wouldn't have needed the duplex. 1.3816 0.05357 152 109 28 15
712 Remember how thrilled we were when the death metal band moved out? 1.3816 0.05021 152 105 36 11
713 I didn’t think it meant “Adopt a Giraffe” literally. 1.3816 0.03357 152 114 28 10
714 He ate both our right arms and now HE's ignoring US? 1.3816 0.05275 152 108 30 14
715 No, hon, I said we needed a carafe. 1.3816 0.05192 152 107 32 13
716 Great, but is it art? 1.3816 0.05275 152 108 30 14
717 I miss the cat.... 1.3810 0.05138 147 102 34 11
718 When you said, ' Come over and watch the big game...' 1.3806 0.05200 155 110 31 14
719 At least we don’t have to take care of the bottom half 1.3806 0.04510 155 102 47 6
720 That reminds me, is your mother coming next week? 1.3806 0.04780 155 105 41 9
721 The listing said "Penthouse with a view." It wasn't specific. 1.3806 0.04780 155 105 41 9
722 He’ll leave when ‘Tiger King’ is over.” 1.3806 0.04867 155 106 39 10
723 Zoomeeting 1.3806 0.05200 155 110 31 14
724 I knew there had to be a catch. 1.3800 0.04885 150 102 39 9
725 It could be worse. We could live in the apartment below them. 1.3800 0.05065 150 104 35 11
726 Better to be the upstairs feeders than the downstairs cleaners. 1.3800 0.04976 150 103 37 10
727 Why does he always have to watch TV at our place? 1.3800 0.05065 150 104 35 11
728 Apparently the reception is better up here. 1.3800 0.05021 150 111 24 15
729 When he ducks down, let's move the couch over the hole! 1.3800 0.04793 150 101 41 8
730 I know, but it’s rent controlled 1.3800 0.04976 150 103 37 10
731 I distinctly remember saying I want a room with a view, not a room with a zoo. 1.3800 0.05407 150 108 27 15
732 It actually does help with the reception. 1.3800 0.05239 150 106 31 13
733 I heard back from the super - apparently it's load-bearing. 1.3800 0.05153 150 105 33 12
734 Not what I expected when downstairs asked if they could have a pet. 1.3800 0.05239 150 106 31 13
735 His reputation is spotty. 1.3800 0.05239 150 106 31 13
736 The worst part is, there’s an ostrich moving in upstairs. 1.3800 0.05239 150 106 31 13
737 To be fair, no one actually reads the terms and conditions. 1.3800 0.05065 150 104 35 11
738 I’m not saying I’m happy with it. I’m saying we at least got the better end of the deal. 1.3800 0.04885 150 107 31 12
739 Five stars: They really do bring the zoo right into your living room. Would recommend. 1.3796 0.05988 108 75 25 8
740 The rental ad did say there was an obstructed view 1.3796 0.05090 137 93 36 8
741 She adds a heightened sensibility to the space. 1.3796 0.05090 137 93 36 8
742 At least we only have the feeding part. 1.3791 0.04908 153 105 38 10
743 Better this than the other half. 1.3791 0.04819 153 104 40 9
744 Ok, Ok... I agree it's a lot of work to feed and water her, but just thing of the job our downstairs neighbors have to contend with. 1.3791 0.04995 153 106 36 11
745 Did we donate THAT MUCH to the local zoo? 1.3791 0.04819 153 104 40 9
746 I told you the ceilings should have been higher! 1.3791 0.05938 153 118 12 23
747 Look on the bright side, we just have to feed her. 1.3791 0.04729 153 103 42 8
748 I’m feel like I’ve already addressed the elephant in room. 1.3791 0.05328 153 110 28 15
749 Gerald you mind moving your head? We are trying to watch the finale of how this world ends..." 1.3791 0.04995 153 106 36 11
750 I wonder how the other half lives . . . 1.3775 0.05038 151 105 35 11
751 Do you remember if my goal in life is to "reject hate and laugh" or is it "decapitate a giraffe?" 1.3775 0.05696 151 113 19 19
752 It was much cheaper than raising the floor. 1.3767 0.05064 146 101 35 10
753 I draw a small measure of comfort knowing we got the better end of the arrangement. 1.3767 0.04776 146 98 41 7
754 We’ve just got to learn to say no. 1.3766 0.04794 154 105 40 9
755 My guess is that wasn't a sugar cube. 1.3759 0.05401 133 93 30 10
756 Well, they told us the city was a zoo. 1.3758 0.05427 149 108 26 15
757 Do we know anybody with a hungry lion? 1.3758 0.05170 149 105 32 12
758 What goes in, must come out, below. 1.3758 0.05752 149 112 18 19
759 See? Now she’s a ‘small pet.’ 1.3758 0.05257 149 106 30 13
760 And you thought living above the magician would be fun. 1.3758 0.05257 149 106 30 13
761 The view is a little obstructed, but it’s a sure sight better than the floor below us. 1.3750 0.04915 144 98 38 8
762 On the other hand; there’s the other end. 1.3750 0.05013 144 99 36 9
763 When the Midtown Toys 'R' Us' closed, he had nowhere else to go. 1.3741 0.04847 147 100 39 8
764 Well....you’re the one who insisted on a pet friendly building. 1.3741 0.05479 147 107 25 15
765 He only pops up on Thursdays to watch "Wild Kingdom." 1.3741 0.04750 147 99 41 7
766 Why does he always sit right in front of the TV? 1.3741 0.04942 147 101 37 9
767 We’re lucky it’s not a sperm whale. 1.3741 0.05479 147 107 25 15
768 Well I, for one, do not recall this in our rental agreement. 1.3741 0.05306 147 105 29 13
769 It made more sense when he was just a puppy... 1.3741 0.05306 147 105 29 13
770 Glad we're not in the apartment underneath. 1.3741 0.06045 147 114 11 22
771 Let's pretend it isn't there like we did with the elephant 1.3741 0.05306 147 105 29 13
772 Bronx Zoo Condominiums you said. It'll be fun living in the zoo you said......... 1.3741 0.04942 147 101 37 9
773 Organic Garbage Disposal”? Knew I should have read the fine print 1.3741 0.04942 147 101 37 9
774 Trust me. We’re better off here than in the apartment downstairs. 1.3741 0.04120 147 108 29 10
775 We feed him, but think of the poor people downstairs. 1.3741 0.05217 147 104 31 12
776 Really, we have it much better than the apartment below. 1.3741 0.05306 147 105 29 13
777 I think this might be our worst art investment yet. 1.3741 0.05479 147 107 25 15
778 She identifies herself as a chihuahua so I guess it's fine 1.3741 0.05479 147 107 25 15
779 I guess technically he is six feet away 1.3741 0.05217 147 104 31 12
780 Oh! I though you said your neighbor was RIFF-raff. 1.3741 0.05306 147 105 29 13
781 Darn - I knew I was supposed to take a left at the fork in the tunnel @ 1.3741 0.06197 147 116 7 24
782 Just when you think lockdown couldn’t get any stranger ... 1.3741 0.05217 147 104 31 12
783 Better than above us. 1.3741 0.05036 147 102 35 10
784 Why does she always do this right when we sit down to watch TV? 1.3741 0.04895 147 103 34 10
785 These virtual Zoom zoo events are really realistic. 1.3741 0.05036 147 102 35 10
786 He'll grow on you. 1.3740 0.05584 123 86 28 9
787 Well there goes our deposit" 1.3733 0.04965 150 104 36 10
788 You know, I could handle this if he'd just stop humming. 1.3733 0.05228 150 107 30 13
789 Feeding it may be our problem, but not the worst problem. 1.3725 0.05199 102 66 34 2
790 Well the cat has new places to visit now 1.3724 0.05702 145 108 20 17
791 When I rented out the basement suite he asked about pets and I said one pet was OK. 1.3724 0.04985 145 100 36 9
792 We should have asked more questions about the “pet friendly” clause. 1.3724 0.04888 145 99 38 8
793 Well, this explains what happened to the ficus. 1.3724 0.05265 145 103 30 12
794 He demanded a room with a view! 1.3724 0.06029 145 112 12 21
795 That explains the hole.... 1.3724 0.05080 145 101 34 10
796 Harold's doctor approved it as a comfort animal. 1.3724 0.04888 145 99 38 8
797 The landlord said there was some wild tenants moving in below us. 1.3724 0.03784 145 109 26 10
798 Just be happy we didn’t get the crocodile suite 1.3724 0.05265 145 103 30 12
799 These apartments are pet-friendly. 1.3724 0.05532 145 106 24 15
800 I’d rather deal with this giraffe than talk about the elephant in the room. 1.3724 0.05356 145 104 28 13
801 Still thinking wall-to-wall carpet? 1.3724 0.05444 145 105 26 14
802 At least there's no elephant in here. 1.3724 0.05080 145 101 34 10
803 Feeding it is much better than what the folks downstairs get to do. 1.3724 0.05444 145 105 26 14
804 He's never going to learn if we keep skipping over the lion scenes. 1.3724 0.05265 145 103 30 12
805 Jeff did say it's a real zoo down in 5B. 1.3724 0.05532 145 106 24 15
806 If you're going to share a giraffe, this is definitely the end you want. 1.3724 0.05174 145 102 32 11
807 Do you think he knows there's a TV downstairs? 1.3724 0.05786 145 109 18 18
808 Fortunately, we got the half that eats... 1.3724 0.05080 145 101 34 10
809 I knew there was a reason for that hole. 1.3724 0.04985 145 100 36 9
810 I hope our appointment is before his 1.3724 0.05356 145 104 28 13
811 For crying out loud, it's always a zoo down there. 1.3724 0.05174 145 102 32 11
812 Has that always been there? 1.3724 0.05080 145 101 34 10
813 Well I guess this is what we get for avoiding the elephant in the room. 1.3724 0.04888 145 99 38 8
814 It could be worse, but I don't know how. 1.3724 0.05080 145 101 34 10
815 Spectacular view of the zoo, it said. 1.3724 0.05080 145 101 34 10
816 It's usually the upstairs neighbors that are the problem. 1.3724 0.04789 145 98 40 7
817 I think an elephant would have been too much. 1.3724 0.05265 145 103 30 12
818 Honey, you said you wanted to live in the Concrete Jungle. 1.3724 0.05080 145 101 34 10
819 They warned us that the big city was a zoo... 1.3724 0.05265 145 103 30 12
820 Look at it this way - we could be living downstairs. 1.3724 0.05174 145 102 32 11
821 I told you making a commitment at a Petting Zoo was not a good idea. 1.3724 0.05080 145 101 34 10
822 I miss our old coffee table. 1.3724 0.05174 145 102 32 11
823 Well, at least we know what we are doing for the kid’s birthday party 1.3724 0.05174 145 102 32 11
824 I know, but it’s a load-bearing giraffe. 1.3724 0.05356 145 104 28 13
825 Never thought I’d reconsider my moral stance on restrictive covenants.” 1.3724 0.05174 145 102 32 11
826 2020, amiright? 1.3724 0.04985 145 100 36 9
827 This isn’t necessarily what I meant when I said that we needed something new to fill the hole in our life, but I will say it’s doing the job. 1.3724 0.04888 145 99 38 8
828 You have to admit, it really ties the room together. 1.3724 0.05174 145 102 32 11
829 The couple in the apartment downstairs asked if we could change his diet. 1.3724 0.04888 145 99 38 8
830 If you're not seeing a giraffe comming out the floor, then I don't think that couple therapy is the answer 1.3724 0.05174 145 102 32 11
831 At least he sticks his neck out for you 1.3716 0.05362 148 107 27 14
832 I mean, if it’s your emotional support animal, I guess I’m in. 1.3716 0.04915 148 102 37 9
833 I'm just gonna stick my neck out and say there's a giraffe in the room. 1.3716 0.04915 148 102 37 9
834 It broke through the grass ceiling. 1.3716 0.05276 148 106 29 13
835 The new guy downstairs did mention he worked at the zoo, but I’m not sure working at home is a good fit for him. 1.3706 0.05126 143 100 33 10
836 They did warn us about the concrete jungle. 1.3706 0.04930 143 98 37 8
837 The downstairs neighbors say it’s temporary, that he was homeless after Toys ‘R Us shutdown. 1.3706 0.05221 143 101 31 11
838 I have a bad feeling about the zoo budget cuts. 1.3706 0.05221 143 101 31 11
839 The elephant in the room was so 2019. 1.3706 0.05029 143 99 35 9
840 Should we tell the people in 3B what is about to happen down there? 1.3706 0.04829 143 97 39 7
841 This wasn't what I had in mind when he asked if we could share our Netflix. 1.3706 0.05029 143 99 35 9
842 And the strangest thing is that we are in the first floor 1.3701 0.05679 127 91 25 11
843 We got the better end of this deal. 1.3699 0.04763 146 99 40 7
844 You should have just given him the password 1.3699 0.05325 146 105 28 13
845 I would’ve given him my Netflix password but honestly this way is easier 1.3699 0.05499 146 107 24 15
846 At least we have the fun end. 1.3699 0.04763 146 99 40 7
847 It's long overdue, if you ask me, accessibility for giraffes is a real issue 1.3699 0.05235 146 104 30 12
848 Robert, we’ve talked about this, you have to knock before just popping in 1.3699 0.05052 146 102 34 10
849 The exterminator did tell me we had giraffes 1.3699 0.05052 146 102 34 10
850 The AirBnB description DID say 'Interesting view. 1.3699 0.05052 146 102 34 10
851 We’ll give him laxatives. The morons downstairs will know what we think of their heavy metal music. 1.3699 0.05585 146 108 22 16
852 I think it likes this nature program as much as we do. 1.3699 0.04957 146 101 36 9
853 At least I didn't get the other end 1.3699 0.04861 146 100 38 8
854 People would think we were crazy if they saw this; allowing a giraffe without a mask into our home” 1.3699 0.05144 146 103 32 11
855 Well, what do you expect for $4,000/month in Manhattan? 1.3699 0.04861 146 100 38 8
856 Don’t pet it, maybe it will go away. 1.3699 0.05235 146 104 30 12
857 We need to talk about the elephant in the room. 1.3696 0.05047 138 95 35 8
858 Wow. Just how long have we been self-quarantined? 1.3688 0.05270 141 100 30 11
859 So. This is the 13th floor. 1.3688 0.05270 141 100 30 11
860 It was half off. 1.3688 0.04973 141 97 36 8
861 Ok this emotional support animal thing has gotten out of control 1.3688 0.05173 141 99 32 10
862 Our ostrich isn't going to like this. 1.3688 0.05270 141 100 30 11
863 The tenants downstairs asked that we cut down on the fiber. 1.3688 0.05365 141 101 28 12
864 We had to take out the pole, but generally this old fire station has worked out well for all of us. 1.3688 0.04765 141 95 40 6
865 Well, we're better off than the guy on the floor below him. 1.3688 0.05173 141 99 32 10
866 Maybe he is looking for David Attenborough. 1.3688 0.05074 141 98 34 9
867 So your emotional support animal and your therapist actually collaborate? 1.3688 0.04973 141 97 36 8
868 Have you noticed that he only pops up at dinner time? 1.3688 0.05270 141 100 30 11
869 Dunno, going to have a look at the lease. 1.3688 0.05459 141 102 26 13
870 I water it once a week and it really doesn’t need much sun. 1.3688 0.05641 141 104 22 15
871 I'm more concerned that it is not wearing a mask 1.3688 0.05173 141 99 32 10
872 Honey, I appreciate you trying to help with my quarantine blues, but that’s not quite what I had in mind when I said ‘I miss Great Neck’ 1.3688 0.05551 141 103 24 14
873 Did we skim over this in the lease? 1.3688 0.05074 141 98 34 9
874 On the bright side it’s not cockroaches. 1.3688 0.04973 141 97 36 8
875 I told you the realtor lied when she said these were 10ft ceilings 1.3688 0.05074 141 98 34 9
876 I' really wish we had read that letter before letting her mail it to Santa. 1.3684 0.05492 133 95 27 11
877 I'll be happy when he can go back outside again. 1.3681 0.05284 144 103 29 12
878 Better than the comfort elephant 1.3676 0.04874 136 92 38 6
879 I hope you kept the receipt." 1.3669 0.05606 139 102 23 14
880 I barely moticed until we started spending more time at home. 1.3669 0.05417 139 100 27 12
881 "Just act normal." 1.3669 0.05512 139 101 25 13
882 I still think wall trophies are more practical. 1.3669 0.05120 139 97 33 9
883 We never should’ve elected a zookeeper to be president of our HOA. 1.3669 0.05221 139 98 31 10
884 The coop board should never have allowed emotional support pets. 1.3669 0.05320 139 99 29 11
885 I asked room service to send up a carafe. 1.3669 0.05417 139 100 27 12
886 Well, it's not as bad as when the upstairs people had that rhino 1.3669 0.05120 139 97 33 9
887 Our reception was way better with the rabbit ears. 1.3669 0.05606 139 102 23 14
888 Unusual fire escape but I kind of like it. 1.3669 0.05120 139 97 33 9
889 Oh, great. I always get stuck behind the tall guy. 1.3669 0.05417 139 100 27 12
890 Most people mount them on the wall. 1.3669 0.05017 139 96 35 8
891 Neckflix 1.3669 0.05221 139 98 31 10
892 We should have gone with that prewar building with the high ceilings. 1.3669 0.05320 139 99 29 11
893 Your turn to get the acacia leaves 1.3669 0.05221 139 98 31 10
894 I meant to give you a heads up. 1.3669 0.05320 139 99 29 11
895 Hey, we're not in the hospital, we're not out of work, and some people out there don't even have a quarter of a giraffe. 1.3669 0.05221 139 98 31 10
896 I know it’s not an elephant. Can we still pretend it’s not there? 1.3669 0.05221 139 98 31 10
897 Oh it says in the job ad that all are welcome to apply ! 1.3669 0.06139 139 108 11 20
898 Damn! I can't see the movie! We should have gotten front seats 1.3669 0.05417 139 100 27 12
899 I guess the elephant is off tonight 1.3669 0.04805 139 94 39 6
900 I get it, I used to live one floor down from an ostrich. 1.3669 0.05512 139 101 25 13
901 Well, at least the thumping noise stopped 1.3669 0.04805 139 94 39 6
902 It looked a lot less like a giraffe on Wayfair 1.3669 0.05221 139 98 31 10
903 Do you think it will get along with our cat? 1.3664 0.05548 131 94 26 11
904 ...I looked at the email again, and it's still not clear how we unsubscribe 1.3664 0.05332 131 92 30 9
905 We did get the better end. 1.3662 0.04843 142 97 38 7
906 We never had hyenas until he showed up. 1.3662 0.05239 142 101 30 11
907 They grow up so quick. 1.3662 0.04739 142 96 40 6
908 Oh I guess this is a ZOOmeeting. 1.3662 0.04843 142 97 38 7
909 ...and that is how the ficus died. 1.3662 0.05239 142 101 30 11
910 At least we only see this end. 1.3662 0.05239 142 101 30 11
911 If we bought that coffee table, this wouldn’t be happening 1.3662 0.05426 142 103 26 13
912 I think this quarantine is getting to everyone. 1.3650 0.05270 137 97 30 10
913 Yeah, but just keep telling yourself, "Two bedroom, river view." 1.3650 0.04846 137 93 38 6
914 NOW I KNOW WHERE THE HOUSEPLANTS WENT. 1.3650 0.05167 137 96 32 9
915 At least we get the more fun end of the digestive tract. 1.3650 0.06119 137 106 12 19
916 We’re lucky our downstairs neighbors are into composting. 1.3650 0.05270 137 97 30 10
917 The camerawork is incredible on these nature documentaries. 1.3650 0.05270 137 97 30 10
918 I told you not to put on Animal Planet 1.3650 0.05371 137 98 28 11
919 Out of Africa" is her favorite movie 1.3650 0.05167 137 96 32 9
920 Text “down scope” to the neighbors downstairs. 1.3650 0.05270 137 97 30 10
921 On the plus side, he improves our WiFi. 1.3650 0.05063 137 95 34 8
922 Yo, is it the acid kicking in or did a Toys R Us open downstairs? 1.3650 0.05063 137 95 34 8
923 We'll never get a break -- they sleep standing up! 1.3650 0.05063 137 95 34 8
924 The elephant in the room is on sabbatical. 1.3650 0.05063 137 95 34 8
925 Maybe it's time to address the giraffe in the room. 1.3650 0.05270 137 97 30 10
926 If she gets the part in Lion King do you think she could get us tickets? 1.3650 0.05167 137 96 32 9
927 He said he was really lonely, and he promises he's been social distancing. 1.3650 0.05167 137 96 32 9
928 You tell him. He's eaten every mask I gave him 1.3650 0.05270 137 97 30 10
929 If it’s not an elephant, do we have to address it? 1.3650 0.05063 137 95 34 8
930 The elephant opted for unemployment. 1.3650 0.05567 137 100 24 13
931 Well I guess even the zookeepers can work from home. 1.3650 0.05757 137 102 20 15
932 That was the only thing left from the Toys R Us liquidation sale 1.3643 0.05090 140 98 33 9
933 They grow up so quickly, don’t they? 1.3643 0.04614 140 96 38 6
934 I guess we should have read the lease more carefully. 1.3643 0.05288 140 100 29 11
935 He pops up every time we watch the Animal Planet channel. 1.3643 0.05090 140 98 33 9
936 I KNEW after we made the Johnson's get rid of their barking dog, they’d pull something like this. 1.3643 0.05090 140 98 33 9
937 Maureen... is it just me, or are downstairs parties’ getting wilder? 1.3643 0.05385 140 101 27 12
938 Good call on the giraffe head, the rest of the art in here is horrible. 1.3643 0.05090 140 98 33 9
939 we can't ignore this like the elephant 1.3643 0.05090 140 98 33 9
940 It’s a vets office downstairs 1.3643 0.04988 140 97 35 8
941 Suddenly I’m less worried about the river dancers above us 1.3636 0.05113 143 101 32 10
942 The Joneses below us asked if we would knock two times on the floor after we feed the giraffe 1.3630 0.05321 135 96 29 10
943 The couple downstairs requested we stop feeding him hot Cheetos. 1.3623 0.05339 138 99 28 11
944 That explains what happened to our acacia tree. 1.3623 0.05239 138 98 30 10
945 When the AirBnB advertised “close to the zoo”, I had no idea. 1.3623 0.05339 138 99 28 11
946 Honey, quick, give him a mask 1.3623 0.05137 138 97 32 9
947 At least we don’t have the downstairs neighbors’ view 1.3623 0.05033 138 96 34 8
948 Maybe we made the neighbors feel toooo welcome 1.3623 0.05813 138 104 18 16
949 I told you, quit sticking your neck into the neighbors business. 1.3623 0.05137 138 97 32 9
950 I suggested they get a zebra. 1.3615 0.05005 130 89 35 6
951 Remember when we thought the tap dancers in 5B would be the problem? 1.3603 0.05078 136 95 33 8
952 Crystal anniversary. You said carafe. My bad. 1.3603 0.05390 136 98 27 11
953 It starts with a ferret... 1.3603 0.05589 136 100 23 13
954 He must smell my giraffe. 1.3603 0.05685 136 101 21 14
955 You’re right. A coffee table wouldn’t work in this space. 1.3603 0.05184 136 96 31 9
956 He sticks his head in from time to time to check on our work” 1.3603 0.05685 136 101 21 14
957 Well I think the kids will like it. 1.3603 0.05078 136 95 33 8
958 Well, at least we don’t have to walk him. 1.3603 0.04970 136 94 35 7
959 At least it’s filled. That thing was a serious hazard. 1.3603 0.05184 136 96 31 9
960 There’s probably a hole in our lease too. 1.3603 0.05390 136 98 27 11
961 He says he was promised vaulted ceilings 1.3603 0.04970 136 94 35 7
962 He'll leave once Wild Kingdom is over. 1.3603 0.05184 136 96 31 9
963 Now that we've discussed the elephant in the room... 1.3603 0.04745 136 92 39 5
964 I didn’t even know we had a basement. 1.3603 0.05078 136 95 33 8
965 Now how did THAT get past the co-op board? 1.3603 0.05078 136 95 33 8
966 Maybe it’s the pandemic but I’m growing bored with Neckflix. 1.3603 0.05390 136 98 27 11
967 No wonder the lower floor was so much cheaper. 1.3603 0.04510 136 95 35 6
968 I'm glad she has more neck room,but buying that unit downstairs is gonna kill us. 1.3603 0.05685 136 101 21 14
969 He’s been clingy ever since he lost the Toys ‘R’ Us gig. 1.3603 0.05390 136 98 27 11
970 No, I said room with a zoo 1.3603 0.05288 136 97 29 10
971 You were right, she does tie the room together. 1.3603 0.05184 136 96 31 9
972 Sometimes it feels like there are three of us in this relationship 1.3603 0.05390 136 98 27 11
973 I guess it’s true - somebody’s floor IS somebody else’s ceiling! 1.3603 0.05288 136 97 29 10
974 I still can't see but I'm glad he lost the hat. 1.3603 0.05024 136 97 30 9
975 It was bad enough when the elephant moved in upstairs. 1.3582 0.05233 134 95 30 9
976 Maybe it’s some kind of pop art. 1.3582 0.05443 134 97 26 11
977 It could be worse, we could have the apartment below. 1.3582 0.05125 134 94 32 8
978 Who knew giraffes were shy? 1.3582 0.05233 134 95 30 9
979 I guess some interior designers are just ahead of their time. 1.3582 0.04901 134 92 36 6
980 They got it as a baby ! 1.3582 0.05443 134 97 26 11
981 He was so cute as a puppy... 1.3582 0.05545 134 98 24 12
982 I'm starting to think renting an apartment above a zoo wasn't such a great idea 1.3582 0.05339 134 96 28 10
983 No, it’s not you. It’s the giraffe. 1.3582 0.04901 134 92 36 6
984 He’s looking for the elephant 1.3582 0.05014 134 93 34 7
985 So, what are we watching? 1.3582 0.05233 134 95 30 9
986 This should make for an unusual Christmas card... 1.3582 0.04666 134 100 24 10
987 Looks like Pierre's back from safari. 1.3582 0.05233 134 95 30 9
988 What do you mean, the " elephant" in the room? 1.3582 0.05545 134 98 24 12
989 It's time we address the 1,800 pound question in the room: Did the cartoonist ran out of time for the paintings on the wall" 1.3582 0.05125 134 94 32 8
990 It’s part of our new open floor plan. 1.3582 0.04901 134 92 36 6
991 First, they made an exception for cats! Then they jumped to leashed dogs! Now, look!!! 1.3582 0.05443 134 97 26 11
992 I really think we need more plants. 1.3582 0.05545 134 98 24 12
993 He's hiding from Don, Jr and Eric, it's the least we can do. 1.3582 0.05744 134 100 20 14
994 This is why we can’t have nice plants. 1.3582 0.05443 134 97 26 11
995 I think an ostrich would work better in this room. 1.3582 0.04785 134 91 38 5
996 I told him he would quickly outgrow the apartment. 1.3582 0.05125 134 94 32 8
997 I preferred the fire pole 1.3582 0.05443 134 97 26 11
998 I thought we were here to talk about the elephant 1.3582 0.05125 134 94 32 8
999 I thought you said the downstairs neighbors were affable, not giraffable! 1.3582 0.05443 134 97 26 11
1000 Wait til you hear the elephants upstairs 1.3582 0.05233 134 95 30 9
1001 Well that's unexpected. Last Christmas, he totally fit under the tree. 1.3582 0.05014 134 93 34 7
1002 Let’s address the giraffe in the room 1.3582 0.05070 134 96 29 9
1003 Better than Tiger King 1.3582 0.05936 134 102 16 16
1004 Wildlife certainly are bolder with us in lockdown! “ 1.3582 0.05014 134 93 34 7
1005 Bertha! Look at me when I'm talking to you! 1.3582 0.05233 134 95 30 9
1006 It’s only fair. We’re logged into his Netflix account. 1.3582 0.04785 134 91 38 5
1007 Must be an Emotional Support giraffe 1.3582 0.02093 134 97 35 2
1008 Time to move. This building has become such a zoo. 1.3582 0.05841 134 101 18 15
1009 I’d say we got the easier half to take care of 1.3577 0.05671 123 89 24 10
1010 Read me that list of side effects again. 1.3577 0.05357 137 99 27 11
1011 I know, but it’s better than our downstairs neighbors’ view. 1.3577 0.04940 137 95 35 7
1012 I guess the zookeeper neighbor is working from home 1.3577 0.04830 137 94 37 6
1013 Just when I was getting used to the elephant. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1014 You see? We’re not the only ones who fell for the 15 foot ceiling baloney. 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
1015 I think we're fortunate that we only have to feed him. 1.3561 0.05060 132 92 33 7
1016 I know it's his favorite show but I still can't see the TV. 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
1017 I told you we should have chosen the house above the aquarium. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1018 He pays me a small fee, and its saves him buying a two story condo... 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
1019 No wonder the penthouse was so cheap! 1.3561 0.04704 132 94 31 7
1020 Nothing really surprises me anymore. 1.3561 0.04825 132 90 37 5
1021 Next time we have a lawyer review the lease. 1.3561 0.04825 132 90 37 5
1022 Well, we always wanted a neighbor who would stick his neck out for us. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1023 If we don't feed it, it will eventually leave. 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
1024 Oh,I thought you invited me in to share a carafe. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1025 I think we got the better end! 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1026 Now do you regret getting those tiger-people kicked out? 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1027 I'm loving this new livestream Animal Planet feature. It's like we're really there. 1.3561 0.05704 132 98 21 13
1028 Feeding him, we obviously got the better end of the deal. 1.3561 0.05602 132 97 23 12
1029 When our downstair neighbors said they were big animal lovers, I didn't know they meant BIG animals. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1030 I thought Toys-R-Us closed. 1.3561 0.05498 132 96 25 11
1031 How could I refuse, he offered to pay half the cable bill? 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
1032 I told you we had a bigger problem than mice. 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
1033 I told you we should have picked the place with the 16' ceilings. 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
1034 Cancel the hat rack. 1.3561 0.05060 132 92 33 7
1035 Oh, he pops up once a week to watch “Wild Planet.” 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
1036 It's usually an elephant 1.3561 0.05498 132 96 25 11
1037 Wait until you see his roommate. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1038 Just be thankful we have the penthouse. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1039 I miss having mouse problems. 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
1040 We've always dreamed of a pet we didn't have to clean up after. 1.3561 0.05602 132 97 23 12
1041 I''m getting tired of these pop-up visits! 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1042 At least we have the end that eats. 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
1043 He belongs to my ex, but I get him on weekends”. 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
1044 I really thought it would leave if we got rid of all our house plants. 1.3561 0.04580 132 88 41 3
1045 The amount of Covid-pets is really going through the roof 1.3561 0.05904 132 100 17 15
1046 I said you should get a large "carafe" as an accent piece. 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
1047 I got the best part of the deal. My neighbor below cleans up after her. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1048 And you were amazed by the dolphins in Venice 1.3561 0.05805 132 99 19 14
1049 It beats the downstairs view. 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
1050 Giraffe? What giraffe? 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
1051 So this is what happens when you work from home. 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
1052 Maybe we shouldn’t have complained so much about their Rottweilers. 1.3561 0.05498 132 96 25 11
1053 Which came first? the hole or the giraffe? 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
1054 This still isn't even close the strangest part of 2020 1.3561 0.05602 132 97 23 12
1055 I know that's not the expression, but I still think we need to talk about it 1.3561 0.05704 132 98 21 13
1056 Well it’s definitely not the weirdest thing we’ve seen this week 1.3561 0.04944 132 91 35 6
1057 You could have at least knocked. 1.3561 0.05904 132 100 17 15
1058 welp, I guess the zookeeper is working from home now too. 1.3561 0.05060 132 92 33 7
1059 Just another new normal! 1.3561 0.04944 132 91 35 6
1060 ....it would be easier to just move the couch 1.3561 0.04944 132 91 35 6
1061 You SERIOUSLY can’t see what the problem is? 1.3561 0.05060 132 92 33 7
1062 The lease only said no cats or dogs 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
1063 Well at least #1B has to deal with the lower half. 1.3556 0.05610 135 100 22 13
1064 So is someone going to address the giraffe in the room? 1.3556 0.04872 135 93 36 6
1065 When we rented this place, why didn't we ask what the hole was for? 1.3556 0.04984 135 94 34 7
1066 I thought you were exaggerating when you said it sounded like a zoo downstairs. 1.3556 0.05511 135 99 24 12
1067 So that's why the rent on the upstairs in the duplex was so cheap. 1.3556 0.05201 135 96 30 9
1068 Zoom calls, giraffes- I'm so tired of guessing who is or isn't wearing pants. 1.3556 0.05804 135 102 18 15
1069 A dog would have been a better fit. 1.3554 0.05360 121 85 29 7
1070 Cheryl, where's our copy of the lease agreement? 1.3538 0.05445 130 94 26 10
1071 Do we've have any acacia leaves in the fridge? 1.3538 0.05554 130 95 24 11
1072 I said I wanted a "carafe"! 1.3538 0.05554 130 95 24 11
1073 I guess Sheila in 9A got her therapy animal approved 1.3538 0.05554 130 95 24 11
1074 I’m open to pet therapy but this will be a real stretch 1.3538 0.05106 130 91 32 7
1075 Well at least we got rid of the elephant in the room! 1.3538 0.05106 130 91 32 7
1076 I heard the view downstairs is even worse. 1.3538 0.05335 130 93 28 9
1077 This rescue animal thing has gone a little too far. 1.3538 0.04484 130 86 42 2
1078 We got the best half. 1.3538 0.05554 130 95 24 11
1079 You bet giraffe we’re moving! 1.3538 0.05335 130 93 28 9
1080 Since politely asking him to move his head isn't working, let's just move the couch so we can all see the TV. 1.3538 0.05335 130 93 28 9
1081 Now I understand why the garden apartment was so reasonably priced. 1.3538 0.05106 130 91 32 7
1082 Honey, I was thinking dog, cat, possibly canary... 1.3538 0.05445 130 94 26 10
1083 I didn't know giraffe rescue was a thing. 1.3538 0.05554 130 95 24 11
1084 The incessant cud-chewing is probably better than what they’re dealing with downstairs. 1.3538 0.04988 130 90 34 6
1085 We should have asked about the hole when we signed the lease. 1.3538 0.05554 130 95 24 11
1086 Well, he is sharing his Netflix password with me. 1.3538 0.05445 130 94 26 10
1087 Yeah, I know sharing a pet with the neighbors is weird, but I think we are definitely getting the better half of the deal. 1.3538 0.05445 130 94 26 10
1088 You wanted a quarantine pet. They were out of puppies. 1.3538 0.05222 130 92 30 8
1089 I realize that it was in the rental agreement, Elaine. I’m just saying it’s worse in person. 1.3538 0.05335 130 93 28 9
1090 Let's address the elephant in the room 1.3538 0.05222 130 92 30 8
1091 Glad it's not an elephant this time 1.3538 0.06067 130 100 14 16
1092 Are you kidding? We’re watching this at home, and somebody’s head is still in the way. 1.3538 0.05554 130 95 24 11
1093 Listen, the apartment's rent controlled. 1.3538 0.05335 130 93 28 9
1094 It’s load-bearing. 1.3538 0.05335 130 93 28 9
1095 I need to unsubscribe from Jumanji marketing 1.3534 0.05250 133 95 29 9
1096 « Barb and Dave from downstairs were finally right to buy all that toilet paper back in March, they really ARE ready for anything. » 1.3534 0.05358 133 96 27 10
1097 I thought their unit also had the high ceilings like ours. 1.3525 0.05573 122 88 25 9
1098 Just keep feeding him and be grateful we don’t live downstairs. 1.3516 0.05387 128 92 27 9
1099 So, which one of us is in the wrong meeting? 1.3516 0.05033 128 89 33 6
1100 I told you so. If we kept the lion, we wouldn’t have this problem. 1.3516 0.05154 128 90 31 7
1101 I don't know, but it was definitely not on the floor plans. 1.3516 0.05033 128 89 33 6
1102 I know zoo animals are expensive but the giraffes have gone through the roof! 1.3516 0.05500 128 93 25 10
1103 Is she ours, or theirs? 1.3516 0.05033 128 89 33 6
1104 I guess the zoologist downstairs is working from home now. 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
1105 Who's turn is it to clean up the mess downstairs? 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
1106 Look I told you it is like in the cinema. There is always this tall guy in front of you. 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
1107 Of course he did it. He won't even look me in the eye. 1.3516 0.05387 128 92 27 9
1108 Be prepared for one more- The new neighbor downstairs is a chap named NOAH! 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
1109 Just be happy we got the end that eats! 1.3516 0.05611 128 94 23 11
1110 We need to start going to those HOA meetings. 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
1111 I’d like to say I’m surprised and that this shouldn’t be happening but after all it’s still 2020 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
1112 I didn’t realize this is what the nature fundraiser meant when it said ‘Your contribution will go towards the sponsorship of a wild animal in need.’ 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
1113 Maybe we should stop encroaching on animal habitats. 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
1114 At least someone’s sticking their neck out for me. 1.3516 0.04449 128 92 30 6
1115 Honestly, nothing surprises me anymore. 1.3516 0.05154 128 90 31 7
1116 Maybe it's time to move to a leafy suburb. 1.3511 0.05410 131 95 26 10
1117 I think it's a service giraffe. 1.3511 0.05074 131 92 32 7
1118 I told you our downstairs neighbors were animals. 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
1119 You sure those were truffles? 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
1120 Listen - when they said at-home safari, I thought it was virtual. 1.3492 0.05079 126 88 32 6
1121 I'm just glad we didn't take the apartment downstairs. 1.3488 0.05001 129 90 33 6
1122 Just be glad we don't live one floor lower. 1.3488 0.05238 129 92 29 8
1123 You don't know the half of it! 1.3488 0.05121 129 91 31 7
1124 That’s what we need — someone who breaks through the glass ceiling and sticks their neck out. 1.3488 0.05682 129 96 21 12
1125 Wow these graphics are excellent. 1.3471 0.04939 121 83 34 4
1126 I've heard of the elephant in the room but this is ridiculous 1.3468 0.05127 124 87 31 6
1127 It's either tenant harassment or a quarantine hallucination. 1.3468 0.05377 124 89 27 8
1128 Apparently there zoo keeper is working from home. 1.3468 0.05377 124 89 27 8
1129 Oh, this is a stretch. 1.3468 0.04997 124 86 33 5
1130 We've reached an agreement. I take care of the top half and they take care of the bottom half. 1.3468 0.05253 124 88 29 7
1131 I thought she wanted us to keep an eye on her roommate, not her ruminant. 1.3468 0.05497 124 90 25 9
1132 Next year let's go with the traditional safari option. 1.3468 0.05731 124 92 21 11
1133 when they bought him- he was just a puppy 1.3468 0.05731 124 92 21 11
1134 Why aren’t we talking about the elephant in the other room? 1.3468 0.05731 124 92 21 11
1135 What was i supposed to say? It's his HBO account! 1.3468 0.05377 124 94 19 11
1136 So... How are you settling in downstairs? 1.3468 0.04864 124 85 35 4
1137 That reminds me, we’re out of nectarines 1.3468 0.05377 124 89 27 8
1138 If you look behind you, you can see humans in their natural habitat. It's fascinating! 1.3468 0.05615 124 91 23 10
1139 Serves us right for thinking a rent in Manhattan could be this cheap. 1.3468 0.05127 124 87 31 6
1140 they were out of elephants... 1.3468 0.05377 124 89 27 8
1141 No, we’re not changing the channel so you can watch animal planet, Steve. 1.3465 0.05705 101 71 25 5
1142 I spy something dappled. 1.3465 0.04921 127 88 34 5
1143 Now will you talk to your brother about his online shopping problem? 1.3462 0.06075 104 76 20 8
1144 Maybe making friends with the zoo keeper downstairs was a big mistake. 1.3444 0.05733 90 62 25 3
1145 The zoo's lawyer really stuck it to us over the air rights. 1.3443 0.04907 122 84 34 4
1146 I believe it’s your turn to clean the basement. 1.3443 0.05675 122 90 22 10
1147 So that’s what the hole is for 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
1148 Down in front. I’m trying to watch the Nature Channel. 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
1149 I just asked for carafe 1.3443 0.05675 122 90 22 10
1150 Maybe so, but it's not as ostentatious as buying books we never read. 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
1151 Say what you will, we still got the better end of the deal. 1.3443 0.05175 122 86 30 6
1152 Is this why the realtor told us not to move the couch? 1.3443 0.05675 122 90 22 10
1153 I wondered why this apartment was so cheap. 1.3443 0.05043 122 85 32 5
1154 His name is Bill and he lives downstairs and I already told him there are no Acacia trees here. 1.3443 0.05305 122 87 28 7
1155 Is this the acid kicking in or is it still 2020? 1.3443 0.05305 122 87 28 7
1156 Yes, the daily feeding is time consuming, but nothing compared to the guy downstairs work load 1.3443 0.05305 122 87 28 7
1157 I know, but it's his Favorite Show 1.3443 0.05554 122 89 24 9
1158 Frankly, I'm glad we're taking care of this half. 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
1159 We’re lucky we don’t live below it. 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
1160 Well, it's a lot better than his head always thumping on the ceiling. 1.3443 0.05305 122 87 28 7
1161 I Said Carafe, NOT Giraffe! 1.3443 0.05305 122 87 28 7
1162 It was either this or a ground floor apartment with a hippo. 1.3443 0.05241 122 89 25 8
1163 Jane, you absolutely must give me the name of your decorator. 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
1164 I know you liked the coffee table, but I think he'll grow on you. 1.3443 0.05793 122 91 20 11
1165 I think you need to work on learning how to say 'no', even when it's the nice neighbor downstairs. 1.3443 0.05675 122 90 22 10
1166 OK, I gotta admit, when you invited me over for some 'necking', I really thought you had something else in mind. 1.3443 0.05305 122 87 28 7
1167 "At least we're better off than our downstairs neighbors." 1.3443 0.05305 122 87 28 7
1168 I spotted him also. 1.3443 0.05554 122 89 24 9
1169 I told you pet adoptions were through the roof 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
1170 Are we ever going to address the giraffe in the floor? 1.3443 0.05043 122 85 32 5
1171 Unfortunately he’s load-bearing. 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
1172 Hey, look at me when I’m talking to you. 1.3443 0.05554 122 89 24 9
1173 That exhibit downstairs makes much more sense now 1.3443 0.05554 122 89 24 9
1174 Nobody thought I’d find a 1-bedroom so close to the zoo in my price range. 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
1175 I told you not to pick mushrooms in Central Park 1.3443 0.04622 122 82 38 2
1176 We knew this would happen sooner or later. 1.3443 0.05554 122 89 24 9
1177 It’s rent stabilized and has a balcony. 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
1178 I guess she broke through the grass ceiling 1.3443 0.05909 122 92 18 12
1179 Can’t find it in me to be surprised anymore. 1.3443 0.05043 122 85 32 5
1180 At least it doesn’t bark. 1.3440 0.05341 125 90 27 8
1181 It’s only for a year. 1.3440 0.05341 125 90 27 8
1182 I guess they waived the size limit on comfort animals due to the pandemic. 1.3440 0.05218 125 89 29 7
1183 He does this every time we watch the leafs game 1.3440 0.05691 125 93 21 11
1184 Its definitely 2020 1.3440 0.05093 125 88 31 6
1185 So, are we going to talk about the elephant in the room? 1.3419 0.05314 117 83 28 6
1186 I think he's looking for giraffic park" ? 1.3419 0.05173 117 82 30 5
1187 I have an irresistible urge, to grab its antlers and ride it like a horse. 1.3417 0.06535 120 96 7 17
1188 That’s sticking your neck out. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1189 When you told me your neighbor's apartment was a zoo, I thought you meant they were noisy. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1190 You know when they asked did we mind them having pets in the apartment below us.....maybe we should have said yes..... 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1191 This neighborhood is becoming a zoo. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1192 She instantly pops up every time savanna is mentioned on tv 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1193 Let him be, this is his favorite show. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1194 The worst part is the elephants above us. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1195 You're the one who wanted to live above a toy store 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1196 How do you say "Down in front!" in Giraffe? 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1197 They aren't common in this neck of the woods. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1198 Wanna neck? 1.3417 0.04950 120 83 33 4
1199 Nothing screams très chic quite like this. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1200 I think they're only trying to get back at us for the ostrich. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1201 Is this what you understood when Jack downstairs asked us to watch his pet? 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1202 We have to feed him, yes, but hey - they have cleanup duty downstairs." 1.3417 0.05292 120 88 24 8
1203 'Can't we keep him?' you said. 'He's so cute!' you said. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1204 Go on Craigslist, type 'throw rug' in the search bar. If nothing you like comes up, try 'chainsaw'. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1205 Now they can’t complain about our hippo. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1206 At first it bothered me, but $2,000 for a Manhattan apartment with a view, I can live with it. Though I may have to move the TV. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1207 You never noticed that the pet store had a cathedral ceiling? 1.3417 0.05797 120 92 16 12
1208 Down in front Melvin. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1209 Well, that explains what happened to your acacia plant. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1210 You would think that the worst part is that i can't see the TV ,but the smell is really awful. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1211 Now the exhibit downstairs makes more sense to me. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1212 I always thought it was an elephant in the room. 1.3417 0.02774 120 96 17 7
1213 Yes it adds something. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1214 No, it’s the ostrich that buries its head. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1215 On the plus side, she does have beautiful eyelashes. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1216 I hope he likes kale. 1.3417 0.05976 120 91 17 12
1217 I told you she was uneasy about staying alone in the car 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1218 So, that’s what happened to the house plants.” 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1219 Did you really mean giraffe when you said we need to talk about the elephant in the room? 1.3417 0.04879 120 90 22 8
1220 Do you have to bring your spirit animal to our couple’s therapy” 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1221 He’s subletting that space. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1222 Can't sit down with you for two minutes without someone butting their heads in on us. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1223 Oh that reminds me - don't use the downstairs bathroom. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1224 I’d kind of like to see how his other half lives.” 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1225 We were here before him. 1.3417 0.03346 120 91 24 5
1226 We’ll need to buy a tree. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1227 Looks like we got the good end.. 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1228 I thought the co-op board turned down Noah’s application 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1229 The homeschool downstairs is having a field trip. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1230 Fred should have taken her back to the zoo before the virus lock down... 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1231 I don't mind that so much as the hole in the upstairs elephant floor. 1.3417 0.05292 120 88 24 8
1232 It was either this or the apartment beneath it. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1233 By far, head and neck above the others we had. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1234 The ad said "Peek-a-boo view of the zoo". 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1235 So that's what that hole was for. 1.3417 0.05675 120 91 18 11
1236 I'm loving this pet share thing. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1237 Agreed he’s intrusive - but wait until you hear his infectious laugh. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1238 This is not what I pictured when you said this apartment was in an up and coming neighborhood. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1239 Down, periscope. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1240 Well at least all we have to do is feed her. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1241 Yes, it's wrong on so many levels, but this place is head and shoulders above anything else available. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1242 At least we have the cute half. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1243 I think we need to address the giraffe in the room. 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1244 Somehow he imagines he's safe from the lion now. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1245 There goes my putting practice. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1246 So what happened to just banging on the ceiling? 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1247 It's been a zoo around here lately 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1248 When they said it was a pet-friendly building, I never expected this. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1249 I think we got the better half. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1250 It cost a little extra to get the top half, but it's totally worth it. 1.3417 0.05857 120 90 19 11
1251 She is sitting down 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1252 Honey, I thought we agreed to microdose. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1253 Why did we put the TV in front of the giraffe hole? 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1254 Why do I always get the one with the long neck in front of me 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1255 He was cuter as a puppy. 1.3417 0.04950 120 83 33 4
1256 I heard the couple below us stopped watching T.V. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1257 Do you remember what the condo regs say about pets? 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1258 Honey...aren’t we on the 32nd floor? 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1259 This takes pop-ups to a whole new level. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1260 So this is what they meant when they said they´re delivering the safari experience during the lockdown. 1.3417 0.04950 120 83 33 4
1261 It's only Wednesdays when he watches Nature. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1262 Should we ask him to put on a mask" 1.3417 0.06317 120 94 11 15
1263 Dude. Move. I can't see the TV. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1264 Well, this takes breaking the glass ceiling to a new level. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1265 Well, that explains the hole in the floor. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1266 Finally, the mystery of the hole is solved." 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1267 Well, the real estate people did warn us that the downstairs neighbors were animals. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1268 I’m already wishing we’d gotten a dog instead. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1269 He is adorable, but can he control the remote? 1.3417 0.04950 120 83 33 4
1270 Can we talk about the elephant in the other room? 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1271 Still, we're better off than the apartment downstairs... 1.3417 0.05158 120 87 26 7
1272 So this is the elephant in the room 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1273 Are the neighbors warming up to your emotional support choice yet? 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1274 Wow, it use to be the elephant in the room, pandemics changed everything, 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1275 Oh great, the kids downstairs are watching Dr Doolittle in 3D again. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1276 Just be glad we don't live on the ground floor. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1277 I'm still happy the pythons moved out. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1278 I told the downstairs neighbors to pop in anytime. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1279 She was tiny when this lockdown began. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1280 A pop-up...zoo? 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1281 Luxury Condos over the zoo sounded like a good idea 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1282 They did say it was an open floor plan. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1283 I must have clicked stay-at-home safari. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1284 I think we should talk about the giraffe in the room. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1285 I sure pity the people in the apartment below us. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1286 They couldn't just get a COVID dog like everybody else? 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1287 Really?! We haven’t finished talking about the elephant in the room. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1288 Does this mean all of us must now start wearing masks at home? 1.3417 0.06317 120 94 11 15
1289 The next apartment we rent, remind me to read the lease before signing it. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1290 Your penchant for weird art has gone too far. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1291 At least it’s quieter than when they lived in the flat above us 1.3417 0.05976 120 91 17 12
1292 Ok, you were right— put the area rug back! 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1293 What neck of the woods is he from? 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1294 It’s a load-bearing artiodactyl. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1295 So where did you say you met this Noah fella? 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1296 subletting was the only way to afford the central park view. 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1297 Still better than living in the apartment below him. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1298 Shh, I’m watching the big game 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1299 At least he's quieter than the ostrich from the 3rd floor. 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1300 I guess we’re neck deep in African decor dear 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1301 Well I guess the neighbor wasn’t knocking with a broom after all 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1302 Hey- six feet, buddy. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1303 This isn’t what I meant when I said I wanted things to be more exotic in the bedroom 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1304 boy those mushrooms live up to their reputation 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1305 It’s a Saturday night. What do you say we feed her some beans? 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1306 And they say in New York you never get to meet your neighbors 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1307 Oh, I thought it was an elephant in the room. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1308 Omg Karen, yes giraffe lives matter too, that isn’t the issue! 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1309 I knew we should’ve read that duplex clause. 1.3417 0.06206 120 93 13 14
1310 Well, it is a conversation piece. 1.3417 0.04659 120 86 29 5
1311 I guess the person downstairs felt like the elephant in the room was too passè 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1312 I am going to downgrade this property on Airbnb 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1313 She said she would pop in sometime today. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1314 Whatever...it’s 2020 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1315 Well, he IS in our bubble 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1316 How many edibles did we eat? 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1317 Well, it certainly looks like the one in the picture, although this one’s a bit larger. 1.3417 0.05225 120 85 29 6
1318 we should introduce ourselves to the new downstairs neighbors 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1319 It’s not perfect but it beats quarantine with your parents 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1320 The elephant is in quarantine. 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1321 When you asked how I felt about long necks, I assumed we were getting beer. 1.3417 0.05736 120 89 21 10
1322 The new normal 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1323 I don't see a thing and neither do you. 1.3417 0.05090 120 89 23 8
1324 Over the phone it sounded like the broker said ‘there’s a draft’, but I don’t think we can fix this with a sweater 1.3417 0.05090 120 84 31 5
1325 At least we’re not downstairs 1.3417 0.05487 120 87 25 8
1326 I say this IS the better half Susan. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1327 I know. I know. He’s been looking for a job for months...but there isn’t much out there for a former Toy Store mascot. 1.3417 0.05613 120 88 23 9
1328 I still feel a mask would be appropriate. 1.3415 0.05867 123 93 18 12
1329 The condo board will have something to say. 1.3415 0.03230 123 95 22 6
1330 Maybe we should buy some plants. 1.3415 0.05394 123 89 26 8
1331 It could be worse, at least we’re not on the ground floor. 1.3415 0.05269 123 88 28 7
1332 Guess you're not the Biggest Pain in the Neck after all. 1.3415 0.05516 123 90 24 9
1333 Well, at least we got the head. 1.3415 0.05269 123 88 28 7
1334 Hey, we’ve moved up! We got the eating end this time! 1.3415 0.05010 123 86 32 5
1335 I'm rethinking my statement, "I'll put up with anything to live in this city." 1.3415 0.05636 123 91 22 10
1336 I knew you’d hate the paintings. 1.3415 0.05394 123 89 26 8
1337 At least on this floor we only have to feed it. 1.3415 0.04875 123 85 34 4
1338 The good news is that he'll chip in on rent. 1.3415 0.05010 123 86 32 5
1339 So the deal is we feed it and the Joneses empty it. 1.3391 0.05368 115 82 27 6
1340 This explains the giraffe penis downstairs. 1.3390 0.06280 118 92 12 14
1341 You're the one who complained about having to go down two floors to feed him when they're away. 1.3390 0.05923 118 89 18 11
1342 This is one of the drawbacks of living above a pet store. 1.3390 0.04847 118 81 34 3
1343 I think we've let being good neighbors go a bit too far. 1.3390 0.05674 118 87 22 9
1344 You know, I would have given you our Netflix password if you had just asked. 1.3390 0.05923 118 89 18 11
1345 I switch it from Animal Planet when they walk him. 1.3390 0.05544 118 86 24 8
1346 The PE Behind the New 'Toys-R-Us' Just Moved In Downstairs. 1.3390 0.06280 118 92 12 14
1347 I never understood what they meant by concrete jungle.. 1.3390 0.05412 118 85 26 7
1348 I guess high ceilings are relative 1.3390 0.04847 118 81 34 3
1349 I knew he worked at the Zoo . . . but . . . do you think he's now working at home???? 1.3390 0.05674 118 87 22 9
1350 Tell me again how you got the HOA to approve this. 1.3390 0.05277 118 84 28 6
1351 What a break. We are on the right end. 1.3390 0.04995 118 82 32 4
1352 We only feed it. We could be on the floor below. 1.3390 0.05544 118 86 24 8
1353 I told you that hole was there for a reason. 1.3390 0.05544 118 86 24 8
1354 I told you not to get the apartment above the Pet Shop 1.3390 0.05277 118 84 28 6
1355 We should've just gotten a fish... 1.3390 0.05138 118 83 30 5
1356 How do you think Eileen downstairs is doing getting the stains out of her carpet? 1.3390 0.05412 118 85 26 7
1357 Spotted lives matter 1.3390 0.05674 118 87 22 9
1358 The downstairs neighbor said she was expecting a tall order. 1.3390 0.05544 118 86 24 8
1359 Glad they got rid of the T. Rex. 1.3390 0.05544 118 86 24 8
1360 That zoo keeper must be working from home. 1.3390 0.04995 118 82 32 4
1361 This is why you read the fine print. 1.3390 0.05138 118 83 30 5
1362 Can we address the elephant in the room? The giraffe is blocking the TV. 1.3390 0.05674 118 87 22 9
1363 I said let’s go with the 25 foot ceilings! 1.3390 0.05674 118 87 22 9
1364 At least it’s not a white elephant 1.3390 0.05800 118 88 20 10
1365 Is that a GIF? 1.3390 0.05923 118 89 18 11
1366 Nothing to see here! 1.3390 0.05277 118 84 28 6
1367 Get your own damn TV, Jerry. 1.3390 0.05544 118 86 24 8
1368 Yeah but it’s not an elephant. 1.3390 0.05923 118 89 18 11
1369 This apartment was subdivided from a Toys-R-Us that went out of business, and Geoffrey never got a new job. 1.3390 0.05544 118 86 24 8
1370 Guess the neighbours took it a bit too literally when we said we wanted a heads up if they were having visitors 1.3390 0.05800 118 88 20 10
1371 We are using his WiFi. I guess it’s only fair. 1.3390 0.04995 118 82 32 4
1372 It’s called modern art. 1.3390 0.05544 118 86 24 8
1373 I guess I misheard the downstairs neighbors when they told me about the new carafe for their apartment. 1.3388 0.05449 121 88 25 8
1374 ‘I’m afraid the master bedroom is downstairs.’ 1.3388 0.05055 121 85 31 5
1375 Well, I guess we're watching 'The Lion King' AGAIN! 1.3388 0.05190 121 86 29 6
1376 "Apparently it wasn't the under watering that killed the plants." 1.3388 0.05321 121 87 27 7
1377 I hate the therapist's waiting room, everyone think's their problems are bigger than mine. 1.3388 0.05574 121 89 23 9
1378 I thought it would liven up the room. 1.3388 0.05055 121 85 31 5
1379 The perils of living in the apartment over Toys R Us. 1.3388 0.05321 121 87 27 7
1380 I always choose the worst seat at movies. 1.3388 0.05321 121 87 27 7
1381 Apparently he's an emotional support animal for the guy in 534. 1.3388 0.05321 121 87 27 7
1382 Concierge service is spotty these days: I ordered a silver carafe for coffee, and got a little giraffe from Mali. 1.3388 0.05449 121 88 25 8
1383 Could we at least watch CNN instead of Animal Planet tonight? 1.3388 0.04917 121 84 33 4
1384 Hmmm. I guess that's why there was a little rug and coffee table there when they showed me the apartment. 1.3388 0.05449 121 88 25 8
1385 Could have been worse. We could have gotten the other end. 1.3388 0.05321 121 87 27 7
1386 Yes, I checked. It’s in the lease. 1.3388 0.05055 121 85 31 5
1387 The surveillance state is getting ridiculous 1.3388 0.05696 121 90 21 10
1388 It was either this or no closet space. 1.3388 0.05190 121 86 29 6
1389 Well, we have it better than our neighbors downstairs. 1.3388 0.05816 121 91 19 11
1390 This whole quarantine pet adoption thing has gone too far. 1.3388 0.05055 121 85 31 5
1391 These fake service animals are really getting out of hand 1.3388 0.04775 121 88 27 6
1392 It really ties the room together. 1.3364 0.05816 110 81 21 8
1393 I’m just saying he should also help with rent 1.3364 0.05671 110 80 23 7
1394 It's your turn to walk Spot. 1.3362 0.05736 116 86 21 9
1395 I told the coop board we should buy the air rights. 1.3362 0.06115 116 89 15 12
1396 Well, I must say I prefer her to the elephant we usually have in the room. 1.3362 0.05329 116 83 27 6
1397 I told you so, pets are allowed. 1.3362 0.05187 116 82 29 5
1398 Yeah, but we're saving a ton in rent. 1.3362 0.05468 116 84 25 7
1399 I thought the downstairs hole would be enough! 1.3362 0.06356 116 91 11 14
1400 We should have expected this to happen with a landlord named Noah." 1.3362 0.05736 116 86 21 9
1401 It’s a zoo down there! 1.3362 0.05468 116 84 25 7
1402 They reopened the zoo, so he decided to shelter at home with the keeper instead 1.3362 0.05468 116 84 25 7
1403 I told you not to feed it, now we'll never get rid of it. 1.3362 0.05329 116 83 27 6
1404 Either we move to the den, or we do like last night -- you push her head down and I move the sofa. Which is it?" 1.3362 0.05865 116 87 19 10
1405 Look on the bright side. We could be living below them. 1.3362 0.05468 116 84 25 7
1406 I'll take feeding him over the neighbor's chore downstairs 1.3362 0.05329 116 83 27 6
1407 I hope Toys 'R Us gets back into business. 1.3362 0.05604 116 85 23 8
1408 It could be worse — the Johnsons have a hippo’s butt sticking out of their wall. 1.3362 0.05604 116 85 23 8
1409 This is the second time this week she's left him. 1.3362 0.05329 116 83 27 6
1410 I guess we're just going to have to get used to living with this new normal. 1.3362 0.04889 116 80 33 3
1411 Who knew the zoo has a social distancing policy as well? 1.3362 0.05736 116 86 21 9
1412 Well, other than that, they're really good neighbors. 1.3362 0.05187 116 82 29 5
1413 It beats having an elephant. 1.3362 0.06115 116 89 15 12
1414 Whoa! How many cookies did I eat?" 1.3362 0.05736 116 86 21 9
1415 Do you see that too? Or is it the LSD? 1.3362 0.05865 116 87 19 10
1416 I hope to find out how the other half lives 1.3362 0.05259 116 85 24 7
1417 Amazing, huh? They have the same number of vertebrae in their necks as us. 1.3362 0.05736 116 86 21 9
1418 I think I prefer the elephant. 1.3362 0.05468 116 84 25 7
1419 Do you suppose we can teach him to sit? 1.3362 0.05604 116 85 23 8
1420 I just don’t think it works as a coffee table, that’s all l’m saying, geeze! 1.3362 0.05865 116 87 19 10
1421 You could look at me when I'm talking to you... 1.3362 0.05187 116 82 29 5
1422 I had a hole in my life and she filled it. 1.3362 0.05187 116 82 29 5
1423 When the “miniature giraffe” you adopted keeps growing. 1.3362 0.05604 116 85 23 8
1424 We really need to align our definitions of necking. 1.3362 0.05329 116 83 27 6
1425 I knew that Noah guy would be an annoying neighbor. 1.3362 0.05468 116 84 25 7
1426 I always tell you that the details ARE important, Brenda 1.3362 0.05468 116 84 25 7
1427 Don’t look so shocked dear, you knew this place was a zoo when we signed the lease. 1.3362 0.05991 116 88 17 11
1428 He said it was high art. 1.3362 0.06356 116 91 11 14
1429 She was supposed to just stop by for coffee and now we’re quarantined 1.3362 0.05468 116 84 25 7
1430 No mask. Not social distancing. We better tell him we've been exposed & are quarantining. 1.3362 0.06473 116 92 9 15
1431 For rent: 1br/1 ba. Great location, skyline view. Friendly neighbor likes to poke his head in. 1.3362 0.05187 116 87 21 8
1432 No one told me necking was allowed in the waiting room. 1.3362 0.05604 116 85 23 8
1433 You know those YouTube videos where a guy thinks he’s rescuing a stray dog and it turns out to be a wolf? Well, funny story.... 1.3362 0.05468 116 84 25 7
1434 Still, I prefer having this end. 1.3362 0.05468 116 84 25 7
1435 Gerald, turn around and check out my quarantine goatee. 1.3362 0.06237 116 90 13 13
1436 At some point, we really should discuss this with the people downstairs. 1.3361 0.05240 119 85 28 6
1437 I told you that hole would come in handy... 1.3361 0.05102 119 84 30 5
1438 Dude, these drugs they gave me are definitely kicking in! 1.3361 0.05102 119 84 30 5
1439 I finally realised why this downtown apartment was so inexpensive. 1.3361 0.05240 119 85 28 6
1440 So much for being accommodating neighbors. 1.3361 0.04961 119 83 32 4
1441 I feel like this giraffe understands Westworld better than us 1.3361 0.05633 119 88 22 9
1442 I’ve had it up to here with this guy 1.3361 0.05240 119 85 28 6
1443 Isn’t this the basement? 1.3361 0.05240 119 85 28 6
1444 All this to watch Tiger King? 1.3361 0.05891 122 93 17 12
1445 I start feeling sorry for us until I think of what the apartment below must look like. 1.3333 0.05664 114 84 22 8
1446 Hey, we may have to feed it, but downstairs they have to clean up the droppings. 1.3333 0.05150 117 83 29 5
1447 If she turns around, act, don't gasp. Matilda is sensitive about her height. 1.3333 0.05526 114 83 24 7
1448 Shit! Can you imagine being at the bottom floor? 1.3333 0.06554 114 91 8 15
1449 We better be careful. It could be a Trojan giraffe. 1.3333 0.05664 114 84 22 8
1450 I think my downstairs neighbor is giving me a heads up. 1.3333 0.05822 117 88 19 10
1451 I got tired of the thumping. 1.3333 0.05291 117 84 27 6
1452 Okay, let's go over it one more time. You'll say, "Hey, is that a penny?!" and I'll move the couch... 1.3333 0.05563 117 86 23 8
1453 I guess the elephant’s on vacation. 1.3333 0.05291 117 84 27 6
1454 The unit with the top half was more, but I figured it was worth it. 1.3333 0.05237 114 81 28 5
1455 I said there wasn’t enough room in this apartment, not ruminants. 1.3333 0.05563 117 86 23 8
1456 We really should rethink our open floor policy. 1.3333 0.05526 114 83 24 7
1457 Well..looked much smaller in its profile picture 1.3333 0.06313 114 89 12 13
1458 Look darling, nature is slowly creeping back into our lives. 1.3333 0.05664 114 84 22 8
1459 We were first thinking coffee table but then went for the coat rack. 1.3333 0.05237 114 81 28 5
1460 Remember, our issues stay out of the bedroom. 1.3333 0.05800 114 85 20 9
1461 That's the downside of these Trump Tower apartments--the ceilings aren't as high as advertised. 1.3304 0.05485 115 84 24 7
1462 Do you want to talk about the Girafe in the room? 1.3304 0.05439 112 81 25 6
1463 Our Realtor sucks. 1.3304 0.05727 112 83 21 8
1464 Renting out some space to our downstairs neighbor really helps offset our rent. 1.3304 0.05439 112 81 25 6
1465 Where there's a will, there's a way. 1.3304 0.06391 112 88 11 13
1466 To almost everyone's suprise, they took the Yorkville studio-with-giraffe instead of the one-bedroom-with-wildebeest downtown, saying that proximity to the subway was the deciding factor. 1.3304 0.05585 112 82 23 7
1467 Usually,it's the elephant in the room. 1.3304 0.05439 112 81 25 6
1468 I knew it ! This IS a giraffe-friendly building. 1.3304 0.05727 112 83 21 8
1469 Oh, this is much better than the downstairs couch. 1.3304 0.05439 112 81 25 6
1470 They want us switch her back to the dry food. 1.3304 0.05585 112 82 23 7
1471 It's a good deal. We have to feed him, but downstairs has to clean up the mess. 1.3304 0.05585 112 82 23 7
1472 We sold the air rights. 1.3304 0.04976 112 83 23 6
1473 You really can get anything off of Amazon these days. 1.3304 0.05135 112 79 29 4
1474 You're right - we should have gotten the sectional. 1.3304 0.05585 112 82 23 7
1475 I told you anything below the penthouse was going to be a zoo! 1.3304 0.05866 112 84 19 9
1476 The folks downstairs don't understand boundaries. 1.3304 0.05727 112 83 21 8
1477 I miss addressing the elephant in the room. 1.3304 0.05135 112 79 29 4
1478 Well, at least it is not a political animal. 1.3304 0.05727 112 83 21 8
1479 I'm just glad we got the top half. 1.3304 0.04894 112 80 28 4
1480 Well, if we can't go outside... 1.3304 0.05135 112 79 29 4
1481 - I was expecting something different when you said close your eyes and count to five. 1.3304 0.05727 112 83 21 8
1482 Ignore that. They’re just trying to get me to sell so they can duplex up. 1.3304 0.05727 112 83 21 8
1483 Oh you meant “Neckflix” and chill....... 1.3304 0.05585 112 82 23 7
1484 In this therapy session, we will address the Giraffe in the room. 1.3304 0.05135 112 79 29 4
1485 To be fair, we only asked about how loud, not tall, the downstairs neighbors were. 1.3304 0.05289 112 80 27 5
1486 On the positive side, the landlord has addressed the elephant in the room 1.3304 0.05439 112 81 25 6
1487 Hey, I’m the lucky one. I only have to feed him” 1.3286 0.07258 70 52 13 5
1488 Do we have to disclose our emotional support animal to the landlord? 1.3276 0.05445 116 85 24 7
1489 I told you it always sounds like a zoo down there. 1.3274 0.05250 113 81 27 5
1490 Turn round when I'm talking to you 1.3274 0.04940 113 79 31 3
1491 The tenants downstairs are animals. 1.3274 0.05543 113 83 23 7
1492 The reception is a bit spotty. 1.3274 0.05543 113 83 23 7
1493 Maybe we could just move the couch? 1.3274 0.04940 113 79 31 3
1494 It’s easy to ignore the little negatives when it’s rent controlled. 1.3274 0.05250 113 81 27 5
1495 I heard her tell the super that it's illegal to ask what her disability is 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1496 It’s nice dating someone whose not allergic to giraffes. 1.3274 0.05543 113 83 23 7
1497 When I signed up for ‘Sponsor-An-Animal,’ I only expected a pamphlet. 1.3274 0.05543 113 83 23 7
1498 He could have at least brought a mask 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1499 She’s really shattered the giraffe ceiling. 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1500 I thought ‘Zoo York’ was just a saying. 1.3274 0.03429 113 86 23 4
1501 Did we have to put that hole right in front of the TV? 1.3273 0.05792 110 82 20 8
1502 I think I still prefer abstact to pseudo-realism. 1.3273 0.05184 110 78 28 4
1503 Next time, let's read all of the co op bylaws. 1.3269 0.06025 104 78 18 8
1504 This is going to mess with the Roomba. 1.3243 0.05602 111 82 22 7
1505 Don't worry, babe. A little tinsel, some flashing lights, and a star on top, and nobody will ever notice! 1.3243 0.05602 111 82 22 7
1506 Well, she's quiet and the easement helps with the rent. 1.3243 0.04816 111 77 32 2
1507 Makes him easier to pet 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1508 Nice! We got the good end. We can feed him all we want and not worry. 1.3243 0.05747 111 83 20 8
1509 It happens every time David Attenborough is on TV. 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1510 I guess 'zooplex' wasn't a typo. 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1511 His sister is on Animal Kingdom. 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1512 Our marriage is so abnormal, we can’t even have an elephant in the room. 1.3243 0.05602 111 82 22 7
1513 So much for that cheap AirB&B "near the zoo". 1.3243 0.05602 111 82 22 7
1514 She loves David Attenborough 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1515 I got him at Pottery Barn. 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1516 I could't say no. Downstairs claims it's a comfort animal. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1517 Very Afrocentric. 1.3243 0.04984 111 78 30 3
1518 We should have just gotten the dog. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1519 I was as surprised as anyone that the zoo let me work from home. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1520 Oh, that’s what that hole is for 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1521 Our friends will call this a tall story. 1.3243 0.05065 111 81 25 5
1522 He never misses The View. 1.3243 0.05602 111 82 22 7
1523 We really need to talk about the elephant in the room. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1524 Next time have our lawyer read the lease. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1525 Do you think that the six feet rule applies vertically? 1.3243 0.05602 111 82 22 7
1526 I knew there had to be a reason this apartment was such a deal. 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1527 I thought the realtor said draft 1.3243 0.05602 111 82 22 7
1528 Quarantine day 501: Woah this nature documentary is so real. 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1529 I told you we should have asked what that hole was for on the walkthrough. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1530 He's only there until the penthouse frees up. 1.3243 0.05747 111 83 20 8
1531 Just because they’re on sale doesn’t mean you have to buy it” 1.3243 0.05888 111 84 18 9
1532 ‘Tall Lives Matter’ but she can’t even wear a mask? geez! 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1533 Now I see why getting a loft above the zoo was so much cheaper. 1.3243 0.05888 111 84 18 9
1534 I don't have any problem with him joining us, but hey, at least wear a mask. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1535 I feed it and the guy in the rent controlled apartment downstairs does the cleaning up. 1.3241 0.05708 108 80 21 7
1536 I told you he was high maintenance. 1.3235 0.05425 102 73 25 4
1537 I guess the flood is starting? 1.3235 0.05772 102 75 21 6
1538 I forget, is he ours or the neighbors'? 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1539 He pays my cable bill and he only pops his head up once a week for Meet the Press. 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1540 Behold the giraffe who only makes progress when he sticks his neck out. 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1541 That reminds me, the people upstairs said they're getting an ostrich. 1.3214 0.05842 112 85 18 9
1542 Even though this apartment is a zoo the landlord still pops his head in to check on me. 1.3214 0.06494 112 90 8 14
1543 The thing is, if we cover the hole up, what would we talk about? 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1544 well it’s better than the stripper pole... 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1545 You bet giraffe I’m moving out after this pandemic. 1.3214 0.06111 112 87 14 11
1546 I knew we should have questioned the "floor hole non-negotiable" on the lease. 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1547 ‘So it wasn’t just termites. Doesn’t mean you’re right about everything.’ 1.3211 0.05512 109 80 23 6
1548 We need to start looking for a new apartment. This place is a zoo. 1.3211 0.05664 109 81 21 7
1549 When you're on the condo board, you can get all kinds of exemptions. 1.3211 0.05664 109 81 21 7
1550 Maybe we'd better keep the lion in the bedroom 1.3211 0.05512 109 80 23 6
1551 Uh-oh, I keep my head in the air and now I can't see my feet on the ground. 1.3211 0.06502 109 87 9 13
1552 I guess we’ll have to rethink the coffee table. 1.3211 0.05664 109 81 21 7
1553 Yo! You're blocking the TV! 1.3211 0.05028 109 77 29 3
1554 I told you it mattered what floor we lived on. 1.3211 0.05355 109 79 25 5
1555 So it turns out the little person downstairs got an exemption for a support animal 1.3211 0.05512 109 80 23 6
1556 The neighbors are up. 1.3211 0.04856 109 76 31 2
1557 What do you think he did to the elephant? 1.3211 0.05512 109 80 23 6
1558 My pet is not as bad as your paintings. 1.3211 0.05956 109 83 17 9
1559 We get to feed it. THEY have to walk it. 1.3211 0.05355 109 79 25 5
1560 If it wasn’t for that we could have a coffee table! 1.3211 0.05812 109 82 19 8
1561 I’m gonna stick my neck out here and guess the guy below is violating the Condo board’s No Pet rule. 1.3211 0.05355 109 79 25 5
1562 I wish we could watch something besides Animal Planet. 1.3211 0.05956 109 83 17 9
1563 The elephant had the day off. 1.3211 0.05664 109 81 21 7
1564 I'm grateful we're not on the ground floor. 1.3211 0.06502 109 87 9 13
1565 I really want to touch it. 1.3211 0.05812 109 82 19 8
1566 Well, we ARE using his HBOMax account after all. 1.3211 0.05512 109 80 23 6
1567 Is this your idea of a staycation safari? 1.3211 0.05028 109 77 29 3
1568 These Ken Burns documentaries are really captivating. 1.3211 0.05355 109 79 25 5
1569 Look honey, Your mother came over again. 1.3211 0.05664 109 81 21 7
1570 As I was saying, nothing surprises me anymore. 1.3211 0.05664 109 81 21 7
1571 Climate change is real 1.3211 0.05028 109 77 29 3
1572 I told you ceiling height mattered. 1.3211 0.05512 109 80 23 6
1573 But, we live on the ground floor. 1.3205 0.06703 78 58 15 5
1574 OMG! I haven't seen her since we were in The Far Side together. 1.3204 0.05888 103 77 19 7
1575 Maybe we should turn off the Nature channel? 1.3204 0.05202 103 73 27 3
1576 It’s not so bad. I know you hate to waste food, and we always have leftover salad. 1.3182 0.05766 110 83 19 8
1577 That' it. I'm asking the super if I can have an "emotional support" cheetah. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1578 Wouldn't it be easier just to move the TV? 1.3182 0.05949 88 64 20 4
1579 You know, now I feel like the zebra would have fit the rest of the decor better. 1.3182 0.05155 110 79 27 4
1580 This works, but where are we going to put the elephant? 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1581 Service animal... 1.3178 0.06313 107 84 12 11
1582 I spend a lot on houseplants, but at least the guy downstairs gives me free fertilizer. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1583 Is it too late to change my vote on allowing pets? 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1584 I don't mind this so much. It's the floor hole in the bathroom that's a little creepy. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1585 I thought the exterminator said he got them all. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1586 Right, 'long necks,' hon. I meant beer, okay? 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1587 I've had worse neighbors. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1588 At least we don't need to worry if he's house-broken. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1589 Well, the mailbox for 1A says "G. Raff." 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1590 We always said, "We want neighbors who feel they can pop by un-announced." 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1591 Well, yeah, but the bottom half's the other guy's problem 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1592 Actually, he's so quiet you hardly know he's there. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1593 I cook. But at least I don’t have to clean. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1594 It escaped from the zoom. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1595 Do you think this will help us ignore the elephant? 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1596 I've been quarantined long enough. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1597 Yeah, but she's quiet and uses the other bathroom. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1598 You’re right. It’s better facing away. 1.3178 0.04806 107 82 19 6
1599 Well I guess that solves the mystery of the hole in the floor. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1600 On the other hand, he is the quietest roommate we've ever had. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1601 Although we did allow him to live in our basement, now he's really taking advantage. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1602 Their kids' home learning packets include the field trips. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1603 Well, at least he doesn't shed. 1.3178 0.04713 107 74 32 1
1604 I agreed they could get a giraffe if I could play my drums at 2am. 1.3178 0.06027 107 82 16 9
1605 He'll grow out of it. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1606 The virus doesn't come with spots, so we're good. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1607 OK, but at least we got the end you feed. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1608 I thought sharing an animal would be fun. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1609 I guess we better get a few Acacia plants for the living room.. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1610 Well, then, you try to find an apartment at this price in the City. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1611 So I said to them, hey, I don't have any problem with pets. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1612 He's still better than our old neighbor. 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1613 Look at the bright side...we only have to feed him. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1614 We shoulda taken the apartment with cathedral ceiling 1.3178 0.04897 107 75 30 2
1615 Well, at least it blocks the anaconda hole. 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1616 If we feed him, then the downstairs neighbors will definitely know we’re home. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1617 I thought you said you wanted to live in Great Neck - not with one. 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1618 Well, at least now we can't fall through. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1619 The neighbors below are requesting a low fiber diet. 1.3178 0.04522 107 78 26 3
1620 They are only fostering him through the pandemic 1.3178 0.04986 107 78 25 4
1621 She really does go so well with our design aesthetic. 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1622 The lease says no large pets. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1623 Just remember, fifteen percent off on the rent. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1624 Refreshing to finally have a meaningful discussion with someone who has a different view of the world. 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1625 On the plus side it's the benefits of a pet without the mess 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1626 We'll have to move the couch... 1.3178 0.05074 107 81 20 6
1627 Down in front, please. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1628 We need a manhole cover 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1629 She's the president of our HOA, she doesn't have cable, and she can do what she wants. 1.3178 0.05074 107 76 28 3
1630 I told you subletting would help us get ahead. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1631 I don't want to spend another night inside, staring at neckflix. 1.3178 0.06027 107 82 16 9
1632 How much do we save sharing the cable subscription? 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1633 NEVER order a coffee table on line again! 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1634 We should move the couch 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1635 Never agree to an easement. 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1636 I questioned buying the unit above Joe Exotic. 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1637 That’s why it’s called a high-rise apartment. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1638 This service animal thing is getting out of hand 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1639 Maybe we should have gone for the place with the shower in the kitchen. 1.3178 0.06027 107 82 16 9
1640 You're right. The hippo would have been the better choice for a coffee table. 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1641 I told you we shouldn't rent an apartment above a taxidermy shop! 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1642 I get a discount on the rent, but not as much as the tenant in the apartment below. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1643 We're a foster family until the Zoo reopens. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1644 He's a nicer neighbor than the hippos upstairs. 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1645 Enjoy it. Next month, we get his bottom. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1646 I've always wanted a pet I didn't have to clean up after. 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1647 I feed it when they're away. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1648 I expected the elephant in the room but not a giraffe. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1649 I’m happy to talk about it, but first I’d like to discuss the elephant in the room. 1.3178 0.05649 107 82 17 8
1650 If you think this a problem now, wait till he grows up. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1651 It's unfair that we have to feed it, but we definitely got the better half... 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1652 Who says you can't ignore the giraffe in the room? 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1653 Maybe we just give her our Netflix password? 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1654 I wouldn't go downstairs for a while. I gave him some bean chili for lunch today. 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1655 They did mention that they were disappointed that the ceilings weren’t higher. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1656 Ignore him. He's just being nosy. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1657 This isn’t what I meant by ‘split-level.’ 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1658 The whole reason we made you a key is so that you’d stop coming in through the living room 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1659 i told you the new neighbors were animals 1.3178 0.05074 107 76 28 3
1660 I told you it’s a zoo down there! 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1661 Hun, should we move the couch or the tv? 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1662 We really must discuss the giraffe in the room. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1663 So the zoo extended their Work From Home policy again? 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1664 The realtor say this place was known for party animals. 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1665 He just drops by when he’s in our neck of the woods. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1666 I can’t wait until they open restaurants, movies, and zoos again 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1667 Should have gone with the skylight. 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1668 Its not THAT awkward darling, we can see the screen fine 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1669 ‘If you can deal with the low ceilings it’s a great apartment’ 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1670 Honey, this 5D television is a bit too real, don’t you think? 1.3178 0.05410 107 83 16 8
1671 This wasn’t in the floor plan 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1672 Guess that explains the giraffe ass downstairs 1.3178 0.06027 107 82 16 9
1673 I’m glad we have this end... 1.3178 0.05074 107 76 28 3
1674 Do you think it’s six feet away? 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1675 Glad we got that hole in the floor filled 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1676 When Toys R Us went broke I got a great deal on Geoffrey. I mostly keep him downstairs. 1.3173 0.05840 104 78 19 7
1677 It's not as bad as when the elephant lived upstairs... 1.3173 0.05511 104 76 23 5
1678 Luckily, I just have to feed him. 1.3173 0.05511 104 76 23 5
1679 I guess we should have specified ‘social distancing’ in our lease agreement. 1.3173 0.05339 104 75 25 4
1680 I'm more worried that she WILL find someone. 1.3163 0.05728 98 72 21 5
1681 I’m glad we’re not in the apartment below. All we have to do is feed her. 1.3148 0.05204 108 78 26 4
1682 Sorry, I told them to keep it down when I have company. 1.3148 0.05978 108 83 16 9
1683 I thought the word 'duplex' was just an oversight in the lease. 1.3148 0.05527 108 80 22 6
1684 So we feed it, downstairs is going to clean it. Should only be until things are back to normal. 1.3148 0.05204 108 78 26 4
1685 We did ask for Savannah style. 1.3148 0.05831 108 82 18 8
1686 How did I not notice this on the lease? 1.3148 0.05831 108 82 18 8
1687 Sorry guys, my TV is not working. 1.3148 0.05368 108 79 24 5
1688 On the bright side, imagine what the tenants downstairs are staring at right now. 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1689 Does he have to watch 'The View' every day with us? 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1690 Let's switch to another mammal. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1691 I thought this was a high rise? 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1692 Just in time, too: we had clearly run out of things to say about the elephant. 1.3143 0.04938 105 74 29 2
1693 I hear the ground floor is shit. 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1694 Thank God, dinosaurs are extinct. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1695 At least he's quiet. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1696 Sit, Spot. Sit! 1.3143 0.05631 105 83 13 9
1697 The lease allows us 1/4 of a pet. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1698 The Airbnb’s note wasn’t specific about the floor-to-ceiling views. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1699 I'm not saying you're a liar, but I don't know how else all our plants could just vanish. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1700 So we're saving the elephant for next week? 1.3143 0.05120 105 75 27 3
1701 You think maybe it’s time to watch something besides National Geographic? 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1702 I thought we couldn't have pets. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1703 Could be worse. There could be an elephant in the room! 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1704 I think the apartment below got the bad end of this... 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1705 Holy shit that's a giraffe 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1706 Did the kid downstairs understand what you meant when you asked him to clean out the pet box once a day for $2? 1.3143 0.05120 105 75 27 3
1707 The landlord says it’s a support animal for the lady downstairs. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1708 Because the down stair neighbors don't get Animal Planet. 1.3143 0.06100 105 81 15 9
1709 At least we got the best part. 1.3143 0.05120 105 75 27 3
1710 What's amazing is that he lives two floors below us. 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1711 Well, it’s only for 14 days. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1712 All I said is, "Sure, I could help out a neighbor". 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1713 Would it have killed them to put four holes in the floor? 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1714 After we feed her we need to warn the folks down below. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1715 The rent’s great, so I just ordered matching drapes.” 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1716 The condo board said we had some new neighbors from overseas. 1.3143 0.04749 105 73 31 1
1717 Make sure the ficus is out of reach. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1718 He didn’t want to leave, so they just built around him. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1719 The ficus, too? 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1720 when they said they were getting a pet,I just thought a dog or a cat. 1.3143 0.04938 105 74 29 2
1721 I still miss the bearskin rug 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1722 I won’t mention it if you don’t. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1723 The agent promised it was a floor-through apartment 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1724 Well, we got him to sit. 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1725 So this is what the broker meant by "floor-through." 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1726 The real show’s downstairs! 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1727 OK, but what's hole in the ceiling for? 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1728 If you can get around that one thing, he makes an excellent emotional support animal. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1729 I knew the owners downstairs had a giraffe easement, but I thought it was just some legal term. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1730 You said it was a hole in the wall. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1731 Honey,kiss me. Suddenly I feel like necking. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1732 We're not getting our rental deposit back, are we? 1.3143 0.05120 105 75 27 3
1733 Listen, there are some things I haven't told you yet" 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1734 Is this how Noah felt? 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1735 She can't miss her soaps. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1736 You stick your neck out and look what happens. 1.3143 0.06248 105 82 13 10
1737 We need to get that hole fixed. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1738 I told you we didn’t have a rat problem. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1739 I thought she was more of a cat lady 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1740 Could be worse, could be the hippo from the 3rd floor 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1741 You’re blocking the tv. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1742 I guess now we know who ate the ficus plant. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1743 ‘I preferred the elephant to be honest’ 1.3143 0.04938 105 74 29 2
1744 Sure, this apartment has its drawbacks, but it’s just so close to the subway... 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1745 Imagine if we had gotten “tails” on that coin toss! 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1746 Yeah but now I’m the one who can’t watch TV without craning my neck. 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1747 There must be a logical explanation. Houseplants don't just disappear. 1.3118 0.05716 93 68 21 4
1748 He’s tired of social distancing 1.3118 0.06300 93 71 15 7
1749 In all fairness, they did say he was going to head upstairs. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1750 They say I rescued her, but really, she rescued me. Now I can't even see the news. 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1751 Soooo, want to neck? 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1752 I gotta say, this takes pet sitting to new heights. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1753 At least he doesn't say much. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1754 Maybe it’s time we addressed the Giraffe in the room! 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1755 Maybe the constant thumping on the ceiling wasn't so bad. 1.3107 0.05168 103 74 26 3
1756 It's "Ruminant of Champions" week on Jeopardy and she doesn't have cable. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1757 ... but does she have to sit right between us and the TV? 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1758 Sure, we've got to feed her, but downstairs has to clean up the messes 1.3107 0.05168 103 74 26 3
1759 No. Fucking. Way. 1.3107 0.06175 103 80 14 9
1760 Should I address the giraffe in the room? 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1761 He is grandfathered into my lease. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1762 He's social distancing from his family. 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1763 Our new neighbor below was once CEO of Toy's R Us 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1764 You said he wouldn’t come back if we sold the tv. 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1765 At least we don’t have the litter box. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1766 How will we know when she is house trained? 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1767 Y'know? I think they might have been exaggerating about the "super high" ceilings in this building. 1.3107 0.04980 103 73 28 2
1768 Free cable comes with a price. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1769 Hey look that giraffe’s back again 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1770 Our floor, their roof; we're all in this together. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1771 This is why we should have gone with the penthouse 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1772 I think we would be better off with a dog, but at least we don't have to walk it. That's 12 B's problem. 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1773 It's your turn to go down and clean her box. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1774 A little heads up would have been nice. 1.3107 0.06175 103 80 14 9
1775 You thought it was cute when the Abrams got a pet baby giraffe. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1776 They told me she was a pygmy giraffe, bred for city living. Turns out there's no such thing. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1777 He likes to watch the Animal Planet channel on TV. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1778 I’d heard about the tap-dancing giraffe, so when my choice was either 714 or 914 … 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1779 You know, I still think I liked the coffee table better. 1.3107 0.05168 103 74 26 3
1780 I walked her this morning. It’s your turn. 1.3107 0.06327 103 81 12 10
1781 The elephant called in sick. 1.3107 0.05168 103 74 26 3
1782 I feed her chili to mess with the guy downstairs. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1783 Say, what happened to all our bonsai plants? 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1784 I think we should have taken the apartment that had the birds' eye view instead. 1.3107 0.04685 103 74 27 2
1785 I think the kids downstairs are playing Jumanji again... 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1786 Trump said he's the latest invasion from China. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1787 I bet they’re reevaluating this arraignment downstairs, too. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1788 The other choice was an ostrich. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1789 Aren't you glad I insisted on adding a bathroom in the basement now! 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1790 Of course, I'm upset. Look at the spots! I ordered a Masai giraffe, not a Northern giraffe. What idiot would want a Northern giraffe in the city? 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1791 Most people hang them on the wall. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1792 We are definitely NOT getting our pet deposit back. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1793 Well, we told them they should get a pet. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1794 I didn't realize this is what the staycation ad meant when it said 'experience wildlife in your own living room!' 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1795 Let's just move to a higher floor. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1796 C'mon, get your own Netflix account! 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1797 Wasn't a coffee table there when we signed the lease? 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1798 Dammit! We just got rid of the elephant! 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1799 This might work better if she didn't insist on watching Fox. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1800 Don’t ya just love modern art? 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1801 I knew it was a pet-friendly building when we bought the apartment, but I really thought the board would rule the other way. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1802 Does this house make me look shorter? 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1803 What just happened?!? 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1804 Hey! Down in front! I can't see the screen. 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1805 Well, its better than that elephant in the room. 1.3107 0.04980 103 78 20 5
1806 At least we know the downstairs neighbors have it worse. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1807 The apartment is great but the neighbors are a little wild. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1808 All I did was agree with him good neighbors don't build fences. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1809 Animal Planet again? 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1810 He's really easy to look after, as long as you let him watch the National Geographic channel. 1.3107 0.04980 103 73 28 2
1811 The realtor said there was a view of Central Park Zoo. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1812 A condo at the zoo, what could go wrong? 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1813 We’ll deal with the ceiling when he gets older. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1814 Can we keep him? 1.3107 0.06175 103 80 14 9
1815 Since when is the zoo doing Take-out ? 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1816 Funny, I never noticed a hole in the floor. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1817 What if he tests positive and we have to take him to the hospital? 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1818 You’d think being on the top floor would give us a little more privacy. 1.3107 0.03094 103 80 20 3
1819 Sure it's crazy, but it pays a quarter of my rent! 1.3107 0.05168 103 74 26 3
1820 The kids downstairs have their classroom pet for the weekend. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1821 I thought "floor-through" meant something different. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1822 He comes through everyday now looking for lunch. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1823 He's working from home during the pandemic. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1824 What?? You sold our air rights? 1.3107 0.04029 103 81 17 5
1825 Somehow, you always end up watching the Discovery Channel. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1826 I like this new place, but the flooring is a little spotty. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1827 He's leaving right after Season One. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1828 When I said I wanted a long neck, I meant a beer 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1829 A little invasive, but better than the rhino upstairs. 1.3107 0.03910 103 78 22 3
1830 I think we discovered what happened to our acacia tree. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1831 The unit with cathedral ceilings wasn't available. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1832 I feel like it’s never about me, Carol. Everything centers around the stupid giraffe in the floor. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1833 Dear, wasn’t it your turn to lock the giraffe port hole? 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1834 Well we did say we wanted our new apartment to be more diversified and inclusive .... 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1835 I wish the zoo would reconsider its work from home policy 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1836 She said her name was Alexa 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1837 Honey I thought we talked about online shopping less during quarantine. 1.3107 0.06019 103 79 16 8
1838 They said they were moving before it grew up but then with the lockdown and all... 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1839 Am I supposed to explain to you the difference between real and surreal? 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1840 I guess this is what happens when you finally get rid of the elephant in the room 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1841 The realtor did say it was a shared room. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1842 The neighbor's pet never makes a sound they said. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1843 When they said “shared living room,” this is not what I had in mind. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1844 So this is what they call a concrete jungle. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1845 I think it’s time we got him a TV of his own 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1846 Apparently streaming channels are faster in our apartment ... 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1847 Hands down, we have to move the couch. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1848 They said they ran out of COVID comfort puppies! 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1849 It’s funny that in any other year this would be surprising and/or infuriating. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1850 I asked you to put those plants out on the balcony 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1851 I know honey, but you know how he gets if we don't watch Animal Planet. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1852 I can understand sticking your neck out for your neighbors, but this is ridiculous 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1853 Jesus. Is Noah building an ark below us? 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1854 Does this mean we now qualify as a crowd? 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1855 I told you we shouldn’t have moved the coffee table 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1856 She's clearly in the wrong neck of the woods 1.3107 0.05168 103 74 26 3
1857 It’s nice to see female giraffes finally breaking the glass ceiling. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1858 Dude, we must be really high right now. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1859 Do you think she’s here to see the dermatologist as well? 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1860 They said it's only temporary until they find him his forever home. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1861 How did we get here? 1.3107 0.03244 103 83 15 5
1862 I thought you said NeckFlix”.. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1863 at least we've addressed the elephant in the room. 1.3107 0.05858 103 78 18 7
1864 We're gonna need a bigger coffee table. 1.3077 0.05479 104 77 22 5
1865 Well, we were saying the room needed something. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1866 Honey, I don't think you've got the hang of a Zoo-m meeting! 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1867 Down in front! I can't see the TV. 1.3069 0.06092 101 78 15 8
1868 The elephant upstairs is actually way more of an issue. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1869 The downstairs neighbors must have one hell of a litter box 1.3069 0.06092 101 78 15 8
1870 Still better than when we lived on the floor beneath the zoo. 1.3069 0.06253 101 79 13 9
1871 Told you my downstairs neighbor loves to pop in. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1872 All of the reviews did say this building was a zoo on the weekends, so I have no one to blame but myself. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1873 Just be glad we're not on the first floor. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1874 The neighbors pull her tail when we get too loud. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1875 I’m beginning to think this is why we got such a deal on the rent. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1876 I told you the apartment below was a zoo. 1.3069 0.06092 101 78 15 8
1877 Yes, we have to feed him but it is worse down stairs. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1878 The listing said “amazing zoo views”... 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1879 Why can't they just steal cable like everyone else. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1880 It's better than the mice in our last apartment. 1.3069 0.05671 101 78 16 7
1881 Look at the bright side: at least it's not cloggers. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1882 It’s your turn to call the exterminator. 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1883 I’m still glad we didn’t get a cat. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1884 We had to know this day would come when we dropped the baby giraffe down that hole. 1.3069 0.06253 101 79 13 9
1885 Looks like another female just broke through the glass ceiling. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1886 The kid downstairs is reading that pop-up book on Giraffes again 1.3069 0.05023 101 72 27 2
1887 This sure isn't what I thought you meant by "neck in the apartment." 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1888 Okay, you're right. The puppy that guy sold us last year was not a Beagle. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1889 Nick, from downstairs, says he likes our TV reception better. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1890 The guy downstairs got a new emotional support animal 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1891 She has our nose. 1.3069 0.06092 101 78 15 8
1892 I don’t know, do we even HAVE any more lettuce? 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1893 I really thought a split-level ranch was something else entirely. 1.3069 0.06409 101 80 11 10
1894 Your ecological concerns are getting out of hand! 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1895 I didn't think the new TV would be this high def 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1896 I’m so high right now. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1897 SSHHH, I don't think he sees us. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1898 I had a different idea of view of the zoo 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1899 When I told you that I wanted some head, this really wasn't what I had in mind. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1900 Better or worse than the ostrich who used to live upstairs? 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1901 He promised to move as soon as a duplex becomes available. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1902 I told you he was going to grow taller than 7 feet! 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1903 That's the trouble with the 8 foot ceilings in this building! 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1904 Well, we did get the better end of the deal with this whole pet sharing arrangement. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1905 Miriam, when they said this building used to be a firehouse, did they mention any recent history? 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1906 We have to talk to the co-op board about the new pet policy. It’s getting to be a pain in the neck. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1907 It's a hole in one and two under par.” 1.3069 0.06253 101 79 13 9
1908 Honey I know you work at the Bronx Zoo, but do you have to bring your work home with you? 1.3069 0.06092 101 78 15 8
1909 It's like Whac-A-Mole but without the hustle, bustle, and mallet. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1910 They've given us the ideal pet. We cuddle and feed it, but don't have to clean up the mess. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1911 I knew it! The apartment below us got a labradraffe! 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1912 It makes a nice statement piece. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1913 I miss adjusting antennas. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1914 3C leased their apartment before the "no pets" rule. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1915 Hey! We’re trying to watch TV here!! 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1916 We got the good end of the deal. All we have to do is feed her. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1917 I don't see this coffee table working. 1.3069 0.06092 101 78 15 8
1918 At least we only have to worry about cleaning up if he drools. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1919 It's a zoo downstairs. 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1920 Our downstairs neighbor. He pops in every now and then. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1921 Look on the bright side, we got his top half.” 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1922 At least we have the eating end. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1923 I don't mind him coming over all the time. But, he could at leasst face us one in awhile. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1924 When I said I needed a tall one I didn't quite mean this! 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1925 Hey could you move your head? I can’t see the movie. 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1926 Well, at least we got the end where stuff goes in. 1.3069 0.06092 101 78 15 8
1927 Well, we don’t need to walk him 1.3069 0.05023 101 72 27 2
1928 We have to find a support animal that is cheaper to care for than Beanstock. 1.3069 0.05023 101 77 19 5
1929 Where’d the elephant go? 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1930 We weren't using the basement anyway and it makes hand-feeding him easy peezy 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1931 I prefer the ostrich head in the dining room ceiling. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1932 How many times did I ask you if you'd reviewed all the HOA fine print? 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1933 I'm glad we got the top half. Some food, some water, and lots of hugs… Imagine living on the floor below! 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1934 On the other hand, it IS much quieter than the parrots they used to have. 1.3069 0.06253 101 79 13 9
1935 That place downstairs is a zoo... 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1936 Perhaps we should pick a less "pet friendly" building for our next apartment... 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1937 Pet Share is nothing like Ride Share 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1938 By all means... join us. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1939 He’s splitting the cable bill with us 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1940 She’s obviously out of her neck of the woods 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1941 We're going to have to move the TV. 1.3069 0.06253 101 79 13 9
1942 It could be worse. 5C got the lion cage. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1943 He’s sheltering in our place. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1944 You are right , we need to rethink the placement of the coffee table. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1945 There's more to this than first appears. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1946 It looks good honey, but I'm not sure we have the space. 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1947 I can't believe that guy on the first floor traded his lion for this. 1.3069 0.06253 101 79 13 9
1948 Well, at least we didn't take the downstairs unit. 1.3069 0.04612 101 75 23 3
1949 when the listing said it was a "zoo" downstairs,I didn't think they meant "there was a zoo downstairs." 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1950 As soon as I heard he was leasing the unit below us, I knew he would be trouble. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1951 The man downstairs says we should put more fibre in its diet. 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1952 I told the genie I'd like to live just north of Savannah. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1953 This is a real pain in the neck. 1.3069 0.06253 101 79 13 9
1954 The vet downstairs is working from home, but he's hoping its only until Labor Day. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1955 I suspect it’s worse for the couple downstairs. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1956 I guess the neighbors are back from Safari. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1957 George is doing LSD again. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1958 You tell her we want to change the channel. 1.3069 0.06253 101 79 13 9
1959 Well, he always made me happy in the Toys 'R' Us store. 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1960 Yeah, I like to feed it leaves, but I wonder what happens downstairs. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1961 I think we need to lower the yeast in that animal cracker recipe. 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1962 Upon consideration, I'm glad we have the top half. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1963 The white guy below was paying tribute to my roots, but I was born in Queens. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1964 I still think we got the better end of the deal. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1965 All the rules this building has, they don't have one that you can't have a pet taller than your ceiling? 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1966 When you said we were going to go wild, I didn't have this in mind 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1967 I think her exact wording was ‘In the heart of an urban jungle.’ 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1968 I preferred the elephant. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1969 so you’re telling me i can’t have a pit bull in this building but the downstairs neighbor can have that? 1.3069 0.06092 101 78 15 8
1970 We can’t afford both apartments, Ray. This is New York. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1971 Hope you don't mind Jerry joining us tonight, his place is a bit of a zoo 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1972 Our neighbors are animals. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1973 They did say this was a very inclusive building. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1974 Apparently the 50 pound pet weight limit is flexible here. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1975 She said cityscape views were a non-negotiable 1.3069 0.06409 101 80 11 10
1976 He gave me his Netflix password, so it only seemed fair. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1977 Tiger King was a one shot deal. Nobody is going to watch Giraffe Queen. 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1978 It‘s rent-controlled though. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1979 Do you like the view from the top? 1.3069 0.05217 101 78 17 6
1980 Watching the season finale of 2020 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1981 Wow! There is a giraffe coming through the floor of our apartment! Very cool! 1.3069 0.06092 101 78 15 8
1982 I thought it was only rat infested! 1.3069 0.05023 101 77 19 5
1983 this is why we need to discuss all major purchases 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1984 Say what you will honey, we have the better half” 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1985 I love how accommodating these high-rises have become, I just wish they had taller ceilings. 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1986 I told you it would look better on the wall. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1987 That explains the giraffe penis we saw downstairs. 1.3069 0.06253 101 79 13 9
1988 Could she at least find a spot that didn't block the tv? 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1989 No wonder the virtual tour mentioned no broker's fee necessary. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1990 I think the ‘necks door neighbor’ joke has run its course Barbara 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1991 Make ‘Toys R Us’ Great Again 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1992 I’ll fully accept the criticism for this, but in the moment.. let’s just take it in” 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1993 Remember when people made functional coffee tables? 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1994 We should have hired a lawyer to read the lease agreement 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
1995 I still think the folks downstairs got a worse deal 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1996 Funny, it looked smaller in the picture. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1997 Now that I can't see the screen, I finally feel like we're back at the movie theater. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1998 Pretty high maintenance...but still much better than the downstairs unit. 1.3069 0.05023 101 72 27 2
1999 He’s honestly been a great subletter. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
2000 It used to be mounted on the wall, but people kept hitting their head 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
2001 Look, we got in-unit laundry in midtown, didn’t we? 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
2002 At least we’re not under the elephants. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
2003 I feel bad Toys R Us went out of business, but I don’t think an office job was the right choice 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
2004 Please address the elephant in the room?! 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
2005 I thought the offering plan said 12 ft ceiling? 1.3069 0.05023 101 72 27 2
2006 Since he painted our ceiling last week, I said he can watch TV at our place anytime. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
2007 Am I high or is that a giraffe? 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
2008 I thought you just got the expression wrong 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
2009 It's been like this ever since Toys 'R' Us closed. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
2010 Wait, don’t move! I’m sure there is an evolutionary reason for this. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
2011 Modern architecture now includes emotional support holes. 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
2012 Yes theres a giraffe in our living room....but my question, Margaret, is why is there a hole in our floor? 1.3069 0.05927 101 77 17 7
2013 I’m glad the marriage counselor can accommodate our emotional support giraffe 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
2014 It's not ridiculous; it's reticulated. 1.3053 0.06000 95 72 17 6
2015 Why can't the tenants downstairs have a cat like everybody else. 1.3039 0.05536 102 76 21 5
2016 I'm just not sure about this idea of merging the zoo and the art museum to save costs. 1.3039 0.05877 102 78 17 7
2017 I guess the zoologist moved into 1C. 1.3039 0.05358 102 75 23 4
2018 I never trusted your art dealer friend. This is not a Modigliani” 1.3039 0.06198 102 80 13 9
2019 It was sixty percent off. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2020 Well, they did turn the music down. 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2021 Just be thankful we're not on the first floor. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2022 Ecologists made them build the condo around his natural habitat. 1.3030 0.06168 99 77 14 8
2023 And yet they won’t reopen the bars. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2024 Looks like those hoofbeats weren't horses or zebras. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2025 I thought our downstairs neighbors said they were getting a cool DRAFT. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2026 I still don't agree that this counts as a "reasonable accommodation." 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2027 So this is what they meant when we signed up for a virtual safari! 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2028 Yeah, but if I get rid of it, I’ll never get my security deposit back. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2029 This is going to make it a lot harder to install that firefighter's pole. 1.3030 0.05067 99 71 26 2
2030 You’re the one who didn’t want cathedral ceilings. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2031 I actually preferred the elephant. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2032 Welcome to our neck of the woods. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2033 If it was an ostrich, I'd be laughing. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2034 Explains why our Acacia's were losing their leaves!" 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2035 Awkward, yes, but is it art? 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2036 Upward mobility if you are willing to stick your neck out. 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2037 They did say this place was a Zoo 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2038 The listing said it was pet friendly 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2039 And you paid how much for our virtual safari? 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2040 We do have to feed her, but at least we're not on the first floor 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2041 The ad did say pet friendly. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2042 Well...at least he's quiet... 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2043 Reminds me of the kinda thing you'd find in a cartoon.. 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2044 If he sees his shadow, we get six more episodes of Tiger Kingdom. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2045 They did say that the daycare facility is exceptional. 1.3030 0.06333 99 78 12 9
2046 So when you told the shelter that we'd be happy to foster an animal... 1.3030 0.05067 99 71 26 2
2047 Well, it is 2020 after all. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2048 I prefer this to the elephant upstairs. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2049 When you suggesting 'necking,' this isn't quite what I had in mind. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2050 Have you met the downstairs neighbors? Nice enough, but their place is a total zoo 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2051 Do you feel a giraffe in here? 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2052 How long will The Zoo staff be working from home? 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2053 At least we don’t live below the Smiths and their elephant 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2054 So much for 9' ceilings. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2055 We will have to endure this for fourteen days! 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2056 I guess we should have looked a bit closer at the "pets allowed" comment in the lease agreement. 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2057 Yes, we get to feed it and scratch its ears, the people in 3G get to clean up. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2058 One of us is High!” 1.3030 0.05363 99 75 19 5
2059 Hey! Down-stairs in front! 1.3030 0.06168 99 77 14 8
2060 Remember, I warned you about the 'Pets Allowed' before we moved in. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2061 This time he's really sticking his neck out. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2062 He's still growing, so we're looking into whether the people upstairs also like pets. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2063 I thought the tall kids were supposed to sit in the back. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2064 And I was concerned that our new neighbors below would be noisy. 1.3030 0.05067 99 71 26 2
2065 The best part? I only have to feed it. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2066 He always seems so disappointed since I moved the acacia trees. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2067 I've been expecting this ever since the giraffes moved in downstairs. 1.3030 0.06168 99 77 14 8
2068 You tell him about the 2 week quarantine! 1.3030 0.05363 99 75 19 5
2069 You have the weirdest dog. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2070 This building is pet friendly. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2071 At least he never complains about the tap dancing. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2072 We need some plants. 1.3030 0.06168 99 77 14 8
2073 The owner promised him it was a loft. 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2074 Well, look on the bright side; we definitely got the better half of the deal! 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2075 I guess they got tired of banging a broom on the ceiling. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2076 I've heard of sharing a pet with your ex, but this is ridiculous. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2077 It was advertised as the ultimate conversation starter 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2078 Gotta really have a chat with that Noah guy 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2079 Sorry, the t.v. downstairs is on the fritz. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2080 Well, I do think we got the better end of the deal. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2081 Okay, she’s nearly 18. The stuffy collection has got to go. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2082 Oops. I thought it would be just the two of us who would be necking 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2083 It's a terrific piece of art, I'm just not sure it works in here. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2084 Well this explains the rent discount 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2085 Just because this building promotes itself as "pet friendly"... 1.3030 0.05168 99 74 21 4
2086 The advertisement said Pop Up Animal Toy..... How was I supposed to know ? 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2087 Home zoo-ing isn't what I expected. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2088 No way that giraffe is 6 feet away. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2089 You have to admit she does a good job watching the place. 1.3030 0.05735 99 77 15 7
2090 Floor damage aside, I prefer this to the elephant. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2091 Its not to bad, at least I don't have the other end. 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2092 See what happens when Jeff Koons is your downstairs neighbor? 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2093 I've always wondered what that hole was for! 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2094 I donated to PETA and was expecting a coffee table. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2095 Don't they have the same height restrictions downstairs, too 1.3030 0.06168 99 77 14 8
2096 He keeps a lookout for any elephants in the room. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2097 At least we got the better half! 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2098 I didn't realize sharing our Netflix account would be such an intrusion of privacy. 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2099 When the lawyer called this an "easement," it seemed kind of abstract to me. Not any more. 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2100 I hope the receptionist knows we've been waiting longer than he has. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2101 I don't have the heart to do it, but I'd love to watch something besides Animal Planet. 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2102 Yeah, but I love his riffs during bad movies. 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2103 It was better when he kept hitting his head on the floor. 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2104 Who referred you to this doctor? 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2105 - I told you we should have taken the loft. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2106 when you consider the alternative, we’re actually getting a good deal 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2107 They said they accept all pets but this is ridiculous 1.3030 0.04859 99 75 20 4
2108 Weird. Last night I dreamt an ostrich with its head in the sand . 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2109 You should’ve just given him your Netflix password 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2110 At least he’ll be quieter than the elephant in the room 1.3030 0.03196 99 76 21 2
2111 Honestly, I think he’s just as happy here. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2112 And what about zoocial distancing? 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2113 I know, but the price was right, and the view is spectacular! 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2114 hmm..where did the elephant in the room go to? 1.3030 0.06168 99 77 14 8
2115 Looks like the people downstairs got a new quarantine pet 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2116 She's practicing for the glass ceiling 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2117 Just our luck...why do we always end up sitting behind the tallest guy in the room?!?! 1.3030 0.04859 99 70 28 1
2118 Sorry, the AC is broken down there! 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2119 I am glad we got this end 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2120 ‘I always sleep in my house but wake up in theirs..’ 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2121 I hear they’re very quiet. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2122 They did warn us that moving to the city might mean nosey neighbors 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
2123 Wow, this HD TV really brings planet earth to life 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2124 This is the last time I'm doing edibles with you! 1.3030 0.05067 99 76 18 5
2125 That's why this appartment was so affordable. The neighborhood is wild! 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2126 That easement might not have been such a good idea. 1.3030 0.05067 99 71 26 2
2127 I guess he brought his work home again 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2128 Honestly it’s nice to finally have some company over. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2129 only in New York baby 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2130 You know, I think this can work. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
2131 When we signed the lease, "obstructed view" didn't seem like a problem. 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2132 I told you, something like this would happen, once you start getting friendly with the neighbors in this city! 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2133 Now that’s what I call sticking your neck out 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
2134 Baby, I know this new Attenborough documentary is in 3D but we’re not wearing our glasses...right?! 1.3030 0.05067 99 71 26 2
2135 Is that a giraffe in our living room or are you happy to see me? 1.3030 0.06168 99 77 14 8
2136 We've been to dozens of couple counselling sessions and she still won't address the giraffe in the room. 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
2137 How’d this guy get a head of us. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2138 said something about the grass being greener? 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
2139 At least we only have to deal with the feeding end. 1.3021 0.05155 96 69 25 2
2140 Getting her here was a tall order. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2141 She has squatter’s rights over both units. 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
2142 We got the good end. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2143 It a real conservation piece. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2144 He said he was socially distancing from downstairs. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2145 Maybe we should have asked just they meant by 'pet friendly' when we signed the lease. 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
2146 Ok. You win. The animal channel it is 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2147 Well, the upside is that he doesn't bark. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2148 I don't mind sharing our exotic pet with the neighbors as long as they take care of the litter box. 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2149 On one level, it could be a bit like owning a dog. But on another level, yeah, it's a giraffe. 1.3021 0.06304 96 75 13 8
2150 When we suggested - Pop up anytime! -- who knew they'd ever take us up on it? 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2151 Well, THAT didn't work. Maybe jack up the couch next? 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2152 Just wait until you see my aquarium. 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2153 And that's why i needed to buy a duplex. 1.3021 0.05155 96 69 25 2
2154 I needed a partner who would stick their neck out for me. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2155 Yeah, but we didn’t need to feed their Christmas tree. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2156 All I really wanted was a coffee table. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2157 Yeah, we have to feed him, but they have to clean up after him. 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2158 Say what you want about the neighbors downstairs... They are quiet. 1.3021 0.04826 96 75 16 5
2159 I wonder which floor it’s on. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2160 Our lease did say pet friendly. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2161 I spy with my little eye... 1.3021 0.05261 96 72 20 4
2162 Sure, he stuck his neck out, but where’s the risk. 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2163 You really should have splurged for the higher ceilings. 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2164 I'm telling you, Eric Trump will never find her here. 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2165 How do I always end up behind the tall guy? 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2166 I guess I should have asked what ‘unique duplex near the zoo’ meant. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2167 Hey, can we watch something other than Animal Planet for a change? 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2168 If only Geoffrey the giraffe knew what he was getting into when he said yes to taking over for the elephant during quarantine 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2169 I'll be happy when the Johnsons get their own TV repaired.' 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2170 she loves watching animal planet with us 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
2171 No potty training required. She's the perfect apartment pet. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2172 When I said you could move in, I didn't know you had an emotional support animal. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2173 At least we got this end of him. 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2174 Let's just call it performance art." 1.3021 0.05155 96 69 25 2
2175 Look on the bright side, we"ve got two extra coat hooks 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2176 They said ‘you’ll never domesticate a giraffe,’ but look how much she enjoys the British Baking shows! 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2177 This seems harder than when we addressed the elephant 1.3021 0.05155 96 69 25 2
2178 It's called a neck easement. Uncommon, but . . . 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2179 Can we switch over to the Discovery channel? I haven’t seen my cousin Carl in years. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2180 Wait'll the ostrich sees this. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2181 I just wonder what the people downstairs are thinking. 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2182 Wow, he really stuck his neck out on the mortgage. 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2183 Well, it is less fraught than the elephant. 1.3021 0.03511 96 75 18 3
2184 It's better than the downstairs unit. We just have to feed her. 1.3021 0.06304 96 75 13 8
2185 How much did you donate to the adopt-an-animal program?" 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
2186 So what if my emotional support animal is, as you say, "tall". I have a right to be accommodated! 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2187 Actually, these is a giraffe clause in the lease. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2188 For a minute, I nearly forgot about the family of hyenas living upstairs. 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2189 I am really glad we don’t live in the apartment below us! 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2190 We need to talk about the giraffe in the room. 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2191 Motherfucker! The giraffes are back. 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2192 OK, it's a giraffe. Let's eat. 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2193 George, the party doesn't start until 1:00. 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
2194 I know I've said it before,but my favorite part about living over a zoo is the giraffe. 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2195 I wish she would get her own Netflix account. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2196 Well yes we'll have to feed him but it's better than being on the floor below. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2197 If only we'd brought our Ring Toss set. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2198 Well I think it’s obvious we need to talk about the elephant in the room. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2199 He wanted a room with a view and the Zoo's willing to pay. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2200 Usually it’s the upstairs neighbors that we complain about. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2201 Well, this certainly beats watching the news 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2202 ‘It could be worse, we only have to feed him...’ 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2203 But why does the hole have to be right between my side and the TV? 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2204 The listing did advertise high ceilings. Though, I suppose it’s relative” 1.3021 0.04711 96 72 21 3
2205 Honey, did you update Safari? 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2206 What do you mean? I'm always sticking my neck out for you like that...! 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2207 I always get seated behind the tall guy 1.3021 0.04938 96 68 27 1
2208 Dammit Ollie! Why do you have to keep sticking your neck into our business? 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2209 I wondered why this Airbnb was so cheap... 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2210 If you think this is bad. Imagine the view from the apartment below. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2211 I'm sure I don't need to point out the elephant in the room, but you're seeing it too, right? 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2212 We’re still not moving to the suburbs. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2213 I thought it was supposed to be an elephant. 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2214 Honey, is bewilderness a word" 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2215 We only have to feed him. It's worse downstairs. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2216 I told you I was accommodating 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
2217 Don't kid yourself. She doesn't like us, it's just the TV. 1.3021 0.06304 96 75 13 8
2218 ...see, and that’s exactly what being affable gets you. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2219 And they said a Zoom safari would never happen. 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2220 It’s always the ones with the biggest heads that sit right in front of you. 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2221 It knocks $700 off the rent. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
2222 I guess it's cool, but where do I put my coffee? 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2223 It literally takes social distancing to new heights 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
2224 The listing said high ceilings.. 1.3021 0.04826 96 70 24 2
2225 We’re going to need a new therapist. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2226 So that's what that hole in the floor was for 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2227 Now we know why the rent was so cheap 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2228 I guess we could watch Lion King 1.3021 0.06127 96 74 15 7
2229 I know, I know but it’s rent stabilized. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
2230 I hate to say it but It’s your turn to take him for a walk 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
2231 I thought you said this building had high ceilings.” 1.3000 0.05596 100 75 20 5
2232 I always wanted a trophy but I just couldn't pull the trigger. 1.3000 0.05222 100 73 24 3
2233 A Stay at Home Safari! 1.3000 0.05774 100 76 18 6
2234 Do you know what a duplex with 20 ft. ceilings costs? 1.3000 0.05596 100 75 20 5
2235 I told you the downstairs neighbor was nosy... 1.3000 0.05505 100 77 17 6
2236 One more thing to tell my therapist about, I guess. 1.2990 0.05892 97 74 17 6
2237 Man, I should have paid extra for a unit on a higher floor. 1.2990 0.05112 97 70 25 2
2238 It’s one those new optical illusion throw rugs. 1.2990 0.05892 97 74 17 6
2239 At least we don't have to deal with the clean-up. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
2240 Did the realtor explain what KIND of easement it was? 1.2990 0.05892 97 74 17 6
2241 She's obsessed with our Dalmatian. 1.2990 0.06072 97 75 15 7
2242 Should we get her a mask? 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
2243 When they moved in they asked if there was any limit on pets 1.2990 0.03639 97 74 21 2
2244 For the record, I wanted to go with the other interior designer... 1.2990 0.05892 97 74 17 6
2245 I never expected him to grow so quickly. We should have put his room in the attic. 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
2246 We should have taken that third floor walk up. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
2247 This was bound to happen once we let them store their stroller in the lobby. 1.2990 0.04672 97 73 21 3
2248 Well, yes, it is hotter up here in the summer months, but honestly, I’m thankful to be on this end of it. 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
2249 I know we moved into this building because they allowed pets, but this is ridiculous. 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
2250 he’s not even wearing a mask 1.2990 0.06072 97 75 15 7
2251 Why can't they just subscribe to Animal Planet downstairs? 1.2981 0.05614 104 79 19 6
2252 I guess it’ll be better than the constant head banging sounds. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2253 Next time we rent space, NO PETS! 1.2979 0.06205 94 73 14 7
2254 So. Do you want to talk about the giraffe in the room? 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2255 We should have let Dr. and Mrs. Doolittle have the top floor. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2256 Next time just give him the Netflix password. 1.2979 0.06387 94 74 12 8
2257 YOU complained about their elephant... 1.2979 0.05202 94 68 24 2
2258 And remember when you told the rental agent that living above the 'Big and Tall Shop' wouldn't be a problem for us?! 1.2979 0.06018 94 72 16 6
2259 We feed him. They walk him. 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2260 Sure, we're responsible for feeding him, but we don't have to clean up after him. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2261 I got it! Let's feed it something that makes the neighbors, um, rethink their decision. 1.2979 0.06018 94 72 16 6
2262 Remember when we only had an elephant in this room? 1.2979 0.06205 94 73 14 7
2263 Love its whimsical joie de vivre, dimensionality and palette, how the darks and lights harmonize with the positive-negative space to create eye movement . . . or did the piece just blink?" 1.2979 0.06018 94 72 16 6
2264 How the hell did he cut that hole? 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2265 I knew that hole was too big for a mouse! 1.2979 0.06205 94 73 14 7
2266 Don't complain. We got the better half. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2267 Yeah, it's a little more expensive than the downstairs apartment honey, but soooo much more predictable. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2268 She's trying to self-isolate from the herd of wildebeeste downstairs 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2269 Guess we'll move the t.v. 1.2979 0.06563 94 75 10 9
2270 Think about it. We're the lucky ones. All we have to do is feed her. 1.2979 0.06387 94 74 12 8
2271 This time, YOU stun it and I’ll try to pull it all the way through. 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2272 It was so nice of her to make us those paintings. 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2273 What did you think the realtor meant when he said the couple downstairs had an exotic animal as a pet? 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2274 Cute, yeah, but he doesn't come when I call him. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2275 I liked the mermaid better, but the floor was always slippery. 1.2979 0.05418 94 69 22 3
2276 I thought it was always the elephant in the room . 1.2979 0.05522 94 72 17 5
2277 I’ve been wondering who’s been eating all the plants. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2278 Well, compared to the family that lives below us, I'm thinking we're sitting pretty. 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2279 Now you know why I wanted the top floor. 1.2979 0.06205 94 73 14 7
2280 Maybe we need to stop tap dancing. 1.2979 0.05418 94 69 22 3
2281 Remember the good old days when rats were the problem? 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2282 Personally, I would have been happier with a dog. 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2283 Yeah. It feels a lot more open without the carpeting. 1.2979 0.04978 94 67 26 1
2284 We share him with the folks on 26 and 25! 1.2979 0.06018 94 72 16 6
2285 I think it comes with the new Safari search app. 1.2979 0.05418 94 69 22 3
2286 Here's the beauty part. We just have to feed it. 1.2979 0.05202 94 68 24 2
2287 That makes 3 ficus trees this week. 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2288 Well this is a pain in the neck. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2289 I thought you said the building had 15-foot ceilings. 1.2979 0.04861 94 74 15 5
2290 So, how's this gonna work again? We just feed him an downstairs will do the rest? 1.2979 0.06018 94 72 16 6
2291 Worst pet-sitting job EVER. 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2292 She was such a cute baby. 1.2979 0.05418 94 69 22 3
2293 Now can we get a coffee table? 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2294 Hey pal, do you mind? You're blocking the TV. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2295 2020: This ship has sailed, and with such a weird heading 1.2979 0.06205 94 73 14 7
2296 I know he smells terrible, but I'm making a killing off his drawings. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2297 Couldn’t they have just got a dog? 1.2979 0.06018 94 72 16 6
2298 Honey, let’s just give him the password to our Netflix account. 1.2979 0.05418 94 69 22 3
2299 The neighbors owe us big time for guarding their giraffe this summer! 1.2979 0.01070 94 77 15 2
2300 He’ll perk up when the guy downstairs gets home. 1.2979 0.05418 94 69 22 3
2301 I promise it's just for tonight... he's having trouble fitting in downstairs. 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2302 Are you seeing this or is it the acid? 1.2979 0.05418 94 69 22 3
2303 Look honey, I don’t like it either but we have to choose our battles. 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2304 Still the most affordable place in the city 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2305 How do you think I can afford the view? 1.2979 0.06018 94 72 16 6
2306 'our super said he will come check it out in a few days.' 1.2979 0.06018 94 72 16 6
2307 I bet he thinks this is a deluxe apartment in the sky.. 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2308 I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: we’ve outgrown the house, Phil. 1.2979 0.05625 94 70 20 4
2309 Our neighbour Mr. G. Raiffe really needs to get his own Netflix account. 1.2979 0.06563 94 75 10 9
2310 I always said this city is a zoo. 1.2979 0.06018 94 72 16 6
2311 You were right, I shouldn’t have cut that hole in the floor 1.2979 0.05825 94 71 18 5
2312 Get him a Bud . . . a tall neck. 1.2959 0.04856 98 70 27 1
2313 First it was the elephant in the room, and now this! 1.2947 0.05264 95 72 19 4
2314 At least we don’t live below the elephant. 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
2315 First the ostrich upstairs, now this. 1.2947 0.05962 95 73 16 6
2316 I’m just glad we got the upstairs on this duplex 1.2947 0.05157 95 69 24 2
2317 I bet he's up to his neck in HOA fees. 1.2947 0.05962 95 73 16 6
2318 I think he is looking for a place to sequester 1.2947 0.06147 95 74 14 7
2319 This isn't really what we had in mind when we said you could pop in any time 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
2320 Where did you find this Safari land cruise package ? 1.2947 0.05772 95 72 18 5
2321 Sure we have to feed him, but it could be worse. 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
2322 I told you it sounded like there was a zoo downstairs. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2323 They say their necks are long because their feet smell. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2324 No wonder they're charging such high rent. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2325 Looks like they were tired of banging a broom on the ceiling. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2326 Looks like the neighbors are air b-n-b’ing again... 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2327 Hey Man,I am starting to think that our downstairs neighbor is getting weird on us. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2328 Stay positive, all we have to do is feed it. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2329 At least, we are not in the apartment beneath him. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2330 I hear it's a real zoo downstairs! 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2331 Head's up! 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2332 Nothing surprises me anymore 1.2935 0.06286 92 72 13 7
2333 Glad we chose the high rise. Can you imagine what came with the walk up? 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2334 Next year we can buy the rest of the giraffe. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2335 This is great! With this animal sharing arrangement with the Andersons, we are only responsible for input. 1.2935 0.06286 92 72 13 7
2336 I thought having the elephant in the room was bad enough, but noooo! 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2337 That family below us is a real zoo. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2338 I want to be good neighbors but we really need to draw the line at some point 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2339 Looks like they got rid of rent ceilings 1.2935 0.06286 92 72 13 7
2340 It's got to be better than what the downstairs neighbors are watching. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2341 I thought you read the lease. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2342 This game is neck and neck. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2343 That place is a zoo down there. Have you ever seen the monkey business that goes on? 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2344 Maybe a hat rack...? 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2345 That reminds me, do we have any peanuts? Dave and Julia Elephant will be coming down for drinks a bit later. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2346 On the plus side, he's paid his part of the rent six months in advance. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2347 The taxidermist said it was "half off." 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2348 I told you not to get Discovery Channel... 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2349 What floor is this? 1.2935 0.05250 92 67 23 2
2350 He said that he just needed a place to hole up in. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2351 Is it just me, or have we not had an unobstructed viewing of a David Attenborough show since moving into this apartment? 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2352 I know I should have some sort of reaction, it’s just nothing really surprises me anymore. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2353 Next time just give him the Netflix password when he asks. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2354 Next time let him have the Netflix password. 1.2935 0.05250 92 67 23 2
2355 MAYBE HE JUST WANTS TO STRETCH HIS NECK 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2356 I told you that guys with the name of Barnum and Bailey renting the apartment below us made me nervous. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2357 I thought I'd be happy with any neighbor as long as they're quiet. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2358 The neighbors say she's pooping fine. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2359 So I figured I'd prefer foodie duty to doodie duty. 1.2935 0.06655 92 74 9 9
2360 Relax,Becky. We've all had to make some adjustments recently. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2361 I think a palm tree would have been a better option. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2362 It would have been a lot easier if we would have bought him his own TV. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2363 We helped him out. The least he could do is turn around and look at us. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2364 They don’t allow cats. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2365 Sure beats the news! 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2366 I feel so sorry for the people in the apartment below us. 1.2935 0.05135 92 69 20 3
2367 I don't know why Fred downstairs is complaining; we're the ones who have to feed him. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2368 If I cut a hole closer to the TV he could change the channel by himself 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2369 You can’t feed him too much or my downstairs neighbor complains. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2370 There was nothing the builder could do, it's a protected species. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2371 You tell him he can’t binge The Crown. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2372 You'd rather we were two floors down? 1.2935 0.05250 92 67 23 2
2373 I don't care if he has low ceilings, does he need to watch the Animal Channel up here? 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2374 Zoo will take him after fourteen days. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2375 I like our coffee table better. 1.2935 0.06655 92 74 9 9
2376 Definitely more pleasant hanging out upstairs with him. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2377 And here I thought they were banging on the ceiling because we were being to loud. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2378 Told you, years ago, we should’ve given them a baby aardvark instead. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2379 'I told you these apartments have low ceilings!' 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2380 No, please tell enlighten me, what is the difference between a giraffe and an okapi? 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2381 Well, this explains that terrible smell coming from the downstairs apartment. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2382 This is because you fed him at the zoo last weekend. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2383 Finally, someone willing to stick his neck out for what's right. 1.2935 0.04897 92 68 22 2
2384 I know I said no more cats, but I meant no more pets! 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2385 Moving upstairs really improved the view. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2386 The previous tenants did mention that our neighbour would stick his neck out for us! 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2387 We're on a 12-month lease, should we name her? 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2388 Huge Mistake Putting Dr. Dolittle on the Co-Op Board 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2389 Maybe we're being a bit too accommodating to the neighbors downstairs. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2390 If our neighbor won't pay for cable for his pet, let's add laxatives to Geoffrey's snacks. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2391 I’m glad we got the upper floor part. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2392 Studios aren’t what they used to be. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2393 I don't care what the book says, I still don't think they are great apartment pets. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2394 The worst part is, he refuses to wear a mask. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2395 Yelp wasn't kidding when it said the zoo was 0 miles away... 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2396 That reminds me, Smokey from next door borrowed a jar of honey. 1.2935 0.05250 92 67 23 2
2397 Feeding her is easy. I don’t even want to think about what is happening downstairs. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2398 I guess people really are leaving the city. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2399 ‘“I’m just glad they didn’t move in upstairs.” 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2400 These things always make sense at a silent auction. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2401 It got rave reviews on Amazon. 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2402 I mean, it’s rent-controlled, so... 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2403 Hey Could You Move Your Head 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2404 Janet, I love you. But your apartment’s turning into a real zoo. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2405 the elephant is on back order. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2406 He was promised vaulted ceilings. 1.2935 0.05791 92 72 14 6
2407 I’m just saying it isn’t neighborly when she goes around calling us a pain in the neck. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2408 I think we should address the giraffe in the room. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2409 Maybe it’s a grass ceiling 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2410 Do you think they’ll know we got here first? 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2411 We shouldnt have stayed at the Trump 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2412 We definitely got the better end of the pet-share deal. 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2413 Well, at least it’s not an elephant this time... 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2414 well, I guess it’s better than the elephant in the room 1.2935 0.05687 92 69 19 4
2415 I was wondering what the broker meant by “through floor apartment.” 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2416 We should've just given him our Netflix account! 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2417 I guess The neighbors are playing Jumanji again.... 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2418 ...and that’s only the tip of it! 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2419 Better than hearing his head bumping the ceiling all day. 1.2935 0.06286 92 72 13 7
2420 I mean, I guess the neighborhood has gotten a little giraffe-ified 1.2935 0.02907 92 74 15 3
2421 Does the lockdown also applies to zoo animals? Or have we just lost it? 1.2935 0.06093 92 71 15 6
2422 I don't get why you don't think this is a good idea. 1.2935 0.05017 92 66 25 1
2423 I told you my neighbor was an animal. 1.2935 0.05250 92 67 23 2
2424 New neighbors are quiet, but a bit nosey. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
2425 Is this really the only way we can afford a 1 bedroom? 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
2426 Giraffe aside the HOA is next to nothing 1.2935 0.06832 92 75 7 10
2427 I don't judge you when you're working from home, Miranda... 1.2935 0.06286 92 72 13 7
2428 At least it's better than living with that elephant. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
2429 These days nothing surprises me anymore. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2430 It looks like we just have to feed him. 1.2903 0.05203 93 68 23 2
2431 At least we're not on the first floor. 1.2903 0.05838 93 71 17 5
2432 I'm just saying I'd be totally okay with this, but his insistence on reality TV is a deal-breaker. 1.2903 0.06226 93 73 13 7
2433 I know, it's not perfect. But it sure beats the elephant we had in the room before. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2434 Social distancing measures encourage them to do house visits these days. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2435 Be grateful. Our responsibility ends with feeding it. 1.2903 0.05203 93 73 15 5
2436 It was you who wanted this penthouse above the zoo. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2437 I wonder how long he’s been waiting to see the doctor? 1.2903 0.05838 93 71 17 5
2438 The taxidermy is actually the least terrible thing about living above Don Jr. 1.2903 0.05838 93 71 17 5
2439 At what point do we say modern art has gone too far? 1.2903 0.05203 93 68 23 2
2440 I think I liked it better when he kept the lions. 1.2903 0.06035 93 72 15 6
2441 Does this make us Green? 1.2903 0.05423 93 69 21 3
2442 ‘Is this God invoking the 10th commandment?’ 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2443 I guess that explains the mystery hole. 1.2889 0.04804 90 69 18 3
2444 We may be stuck in here, but at least we still have our sanit- 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2445 Yes, we have to feed him, but at least we don't have to clean up after him. 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2446 Can we all just talk about the elephant in the room? 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2447 Are we supposed to feed him? 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2448 Hey, down in front. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2449 You know, it’s pretty hard to quarantine a giraffe. 1.2889 0.05299 90 66 22 2
2450 Our side of the jungle got too crowded For social distancing 1.2889 0.04673 90 71 15 4
2451 I see Bob and Susan got a new pet. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2452 Looks like 12B won’t be getting their pet deposit back. 1.2889 0.05299 90 66 22 2
2453 We need a new co-op board. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2454 she really likes the Animal Planet channel 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2455 She was cheaper than a coffee table. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2456 Look at the bright side—we can feed it as much as we want." 1.2889 0.05299 90 66 22 2
2457 Ethical considerations aside, we did get the better end of the deal. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2458 I guess we’re lucky. He eats up here, the rest is their problem. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2459 They grow up so fast. 1.2889 0.06369 90 71 12 7
2460 If she doesn't leave in 5 minutes I'm putting on The Lion King. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2461 Now I get why rent is so cheap. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2462 At least we only have to feed it 1.2889 0.06369 90 71 12 7
2463 Eventually, we'll need a bigger place. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2464 Yeah, but at least it's the better half. 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2465 I’ve had it up to here with this apartment! 1.2889 0.05299 90 66 22 2
2466 Did you hear that Tarzan moved into the building? 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2467 Damn invasive species. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2468 Look at me when I'm talking to you... 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2469 The zoo downstairs doesn’t have cable. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2470 Well, on the bright side, we get the part that eats food and does not pass it out. 1.2889 0.04397 90 70 17 3
2471 Built the apartment around him...it was the least we could do. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2472 Well, at least we don't have an elephant in the room. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2473 Should we move the couch or the TV? 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2474 It's the last half of its species. 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2475 The guy downstairs started binge-watching Tiger King and poof, the next thing you know old Joe “ Psychotic” starts his own zoo. 1.2889 0.06369 90 71 12 7
2476 Well, I must admit, they did ask first! 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2477 “Don’t worry, honey...it’s paying rent” 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2478 Hell, I told them it wasn't a puppy when they first brought it home. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2479 She stuck her neck out and broke the glass ceiling 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2480 I can’t believe I signed the petition to let the Willis family to adopt an animal from the zoo that had to close! 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2481 . . . And I thought it was a zoo out there. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2482 That broker told me that a "zooplex" was just like a duplex 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2483 The hard part is getting him to wear a mask when l take him for a walk! 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2484 Another reason to be glad we bought 19-C, not 18-C. 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2485 Hopefully this is the better end of the bargain. 1.2889 0.05299 90 66 22 2
2486 I know, but I’m not complaining. You should have seen what my last neighbor used to poke up through there. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2487 We should just give him our Netflix password. 1.2889 0.04397 90 70 17 3
2488 Darling, I asked you for a carafe of beer, not a giraffe of cheer! 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2489 When I invited him to join our bubble, I didn’t realize he was a zookeeper... 1.2889 0.05299 90 66 22 2
2490 Better this than what they get downstairs. 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2491 Well, the building's management had to have vetted it as an emotional-support pet. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2492 I do feel a little bad for Carl downstairs though... 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2493 Yeah, he eats a lot. But I still say we got a better deal than the folks downstairs. 1.2889 0.05299 90 66 22 2
2494 They discussed this at the last board meeting. You can have one giraffe or two llamas.. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2495 It's not exactly convenient, but my downstairs neighbors have it a lot worse. 1.2889 0.05058 90 65 24 1
2496 We only have to feed her, the folks downstairs do the dirty work 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2497 Such a good neighbor. He's always sticking his neck out for us. 1.2889 0.06270 90 73 9 8
2498 I still think it would have been easier to just tell him our Netflix password. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2499 It's a real zoo down there 1.2889 0.05299 90 66 22 2
2500 I sure wish the downstairs neighbors would get their own TV. 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2501 Next time we get a pet, let's measure it beforehand. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2502 I heard her pitch was too high-concept for downstairs. 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2503 My therapist said I should let in my base animal instincts. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2504 Not the Nature Channel again! 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2505 He’s ready for the zoom call: Business on top party down below. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2506 Well . . . I guess we're lucky to have the head end. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2507 I think we got the best half of this Giraffe share 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2508 I'm getting a little tired of Animal Channel. 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2509 I thought he'd be taller! 1.2889 0.04933 90 67 21 2
2510 3D movies have gotten pretty advanced. 1.2889 0.06562 90 72 10 8
2511 Life is short. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2512 At least we didn't rent the apartment below. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2513 I'm not sure about being endangered meaning you get the remote. 1.2889 0.05058 90 65 24 1
2514 Can't they just bang on the ceiling with a broomstick like normal neighbors? 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2515 Gerald is the most compassionate big game hunter you will ever meet. 1.2889 0.05299 90 66 22 2
2516 Sometimes I think, "What would it be like if we had gotten a p..u..p..p..y." 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2517 We should have read the Association pet policy a lot closer. 1.2889 0.06369 90 71 12 7
2518 In retrospect, we should have taken that unit over the zebras. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2519 He must think there's a "Zoo"m meeting 1.2889 0.06369 90 71 12 7
2520 I guess we aren't the only ones feeling holed up. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2521 I swear I clicked ‘rug.’ 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2522 The guys downstairs asked me to stop feeding her. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2523 Glad we don't live downstairs. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2524 He claims air rights. 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2525 He just pops up now and then to watch Netflix. 1.2889 0.05058 90 65 24 1
2526 Sure; let's live above a Toys"R"Us, you said. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2527 Don’t forget to cover her eyes when the movie gets to the stampede scene. 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2528 We gotta move the Acacia tree! 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2529 And you said that no one would stick out their neck for me. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2530 I told you the apartment downstairs was a zoo! 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2531 At least we only have to feed it. Sure glad we did not take the first floor apartment. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2532 I feel like I live in a zoo. 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2533 'Can you move your head? You're blocking the screen.' 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2534 I knew I had those growth hormone pills last month. Now I know where they went! 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2535 City life is a zoo I tell ya! 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2536 So not what I meant by contemporary art... 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2537 I thought you said you wanted neck, flicks and chill. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2538 Would you mind moving your head a little to the left? 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2539 oh no not another night watching animal planet 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2540 I told you we should have just given him the Netflix password. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2541 I guess he could tell we were about to start necking. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2542 See, one minute you’re being nice to the new neighbours, the next minute they’re always poking their heads in 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2543 Did he just sneeze? 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2544 It’s definitely a statement piece. 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2545 Tell me you are seeing that 1.2889 0.05058 90 65 24 1
2546 Sorry, Lorelai and Steven, my giraffe needed a new environment to look at. Hope you don't mind 1.2889 0.06562 90 72 10 8
2547 Next time you agree to pet sit, will you consult with me first? 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2548 I thought artist lofts would be cooler. 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2549 A much needed change. It was getting hard to bear the elephant in the room. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2550 should we all wear a mask? 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2551 Alexa, show me giraffe videos on TV. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2552 I do pay a premium for the upstairs unit 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2553 Is the giraffe the new 'Elephant in the room'.... 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2554 I know the ad was technically correct, but it's just not what I imagined when we applied for the zoo's new diversity shared housing concept 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2555 Wtf ?? 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2556 We're not letting your sister house sit for us any more 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2557 At least we’re don’t have to talk about the elephant. 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2558 That’s not an elephant; it’s a giraffe...but what does that have to do with our marriage? 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2559 When they said the ceilings in this building were so tall they could almost fit a giraffe they weren’t kidding. 1.2889 0.06170 90 70 14 6
2560 This beats the view from the first floor 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2561 I may not know art, but I know what I like 1.2889 0.05529 90 67 20 3
2562 It’s even more frustrating because he has the remote 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2563 This the only way she can see the Lion King with us. 1.2889 0.05180 90 68 19 3
2564 Thank goodness we got the 1/2 where the food goes in. 1.2889 0.06562 90 72 10 8
2565 Can we talk about the giraffe in the room? 1.2889 0.05058 90 65 24 1
2566 We need to talk. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2567 I thought it was a figurative adoption. 1.2889 0.05058 90 65 24 1
2568 Tall yes, but can he fetch? 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2569 Holy giraffe 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2570 There are patterns everywhere 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2571 if you want a more traditional Christmas I can hang a baubles off his horns 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2572 Honey, did we forget to pay the giraffe bill this month? 1.2889 0.06369 90 71 12 7
2573 Mask please. 1.2889 0.05964 90 69 16 5
2574 This is not how I thought we would share a Netflix account 1.2889 0.05299 90 66 22 2
2575 Ok, I am willing to concede that you may have a point about me taking too much LSD. 1.2857 0.05250 91 67 22 2
2576 He says he's upwardly-mobile 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2577 I thought you said there was an elephant in here. 1.2857 0.06110 91 71 14 6
2578 I think the downstairs neighbors are getting the worst of it." 1.2857 0.05250 91 67 22 2
2579 Don't feed it this time. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2580 When I saw the ad,"Upper West Side, New 2 bedroom, just under 1.5 million"I wasn't seeing any downside. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2581 At least we got the end where the food goes in. 1.2857 0.05012 91 66 24 1
2582 Wow, Disney+ is really stepping up their nature documentaries." 1.2857 0.06110 91 71 14 6
2583 Fortunately, we're only in charge of feeding 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2584 I’m sorry but the elephant in the room is on vacation. 1.2857 0.06110 91 71 14 6
2585 He’s on a zoom call with a Toys R Us and needed to use our internet 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2586 It's time he got his own HBO subscription. 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2587 Could be worse. We do have total clicker control. 1.2857 0.05588 91 71 15 5
2588 I am pretty sure this still violates quarentine 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2589 Are you sure you wanna watch this nature documentary with us, buddy? 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2590 'Honey, this online shopping is getting out of control' 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2591 Condo Board President said some guy named Noah moving in this weekend... 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2592 So, when do you think ‘Lion King’ will reopen? 1.2857 0.05250 91 67 22 2
2593 Aside from the occasional invasion of privacy, yes, I still believe we got the best end of the deal. 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
2594 I was wondering what that hole was for. 1.2841 0.05348 88 65 21 2
2595 Still better than the previous neighbor. 1.2841 0.05816 88 67 17 4
2596 Why in the world did you give him the remote? 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
2597 I guess we’ve had worse neighbors. 1.2841 0.05348 88 65 21 2
2598 I think it's time to clean out the basement! 1.2841 0.05587 88 66 19 3
2599 Are you ready to talk about the giraffe in the room? 1.2841 0.05348 88 65 21 2
2600 Is this what you watch! I thought humans were more civilized. 1.2841 0.05816 88 67 17 4
2601 Now we know why the Realtor told us that laugh rhymes with giraffe. 1.2841 0.05816 88 67 17 4
2602 Is it just me, or did the mushrooms just kick in? 1.2841 0.05816 88 67 17 4
2603 How come SHE always gets to choose the program?! 1.2841 0.05587 88 66 19 3
2604 I told you to be careful what you said about the condo board. 1.2841 0.05816 88 67 17 4
2605 You can tell it's a female by the eyelashes. 1.2841 0.05816 88 67 17 4
2606 Oh, I 'm okay with sharing the apartment. She's not black, but she is African American. 1.2841 0.05587 88 66 19 3
2607 Let's talk about the giraffe in the room. 1.2841 0.05587 88 66 19 3
2608 She was just a little bit of a thing three years ago and now look at her. All grown up. 1.2841 0.05587 88 66 19 3
2609 He just likes to watch. 1.2841 0.06249 88 69 13 6
2610 The neighbors just brought our pet-friendly building policy to a whole new level. 1.2841 0.06249 88 69 13 6
2611 I feel good with our choice. This end should be easier to maintain. 1.2841 0.06455 88 70 11 7
2612 Well, at least we are in 18G not 16G. 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
2613 Looks like the cost of exotic animals has gone through the roof. 1.2841 0.05816 88 67 17 4
2614 I should have measured before buying her. 1.2841 0.05587 88 66 19 3
2615 This is the last time that we will rent a tree house near the zoo! 1.2841 0.05348 88 65 21 2
2616 I told him to think about his overhead before he brought the place. 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
2617 And I thought all we had to worry about was the elephant above us. 1.2841 0.05348 88 65 21 2
2618 Well, I guess we can always put the coffee table there. 1.2841 0.06249 88 69 13 6
2619 He did rent the duplex. 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
2620 I'll mention it to the co-op board. 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
2621 You should see what the people downstairs are watching. 1.2841 0.06455 88 70 11 7
2622 I'd love to get rid of him, but the hole is an original feature and he's in a rent controlled apartment 1.2841 0.05587 88 66 19 3
2623 What can I do, he has an easement. 1.2841 0.05587 88 66 19 3
2624 At least she stuck her neck out for us. 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
2625 Maybe we need to revise our stance on contemporary living arts." 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
2626 We always get seated behind that guy 1.2841 0.05587 88 66 19 3
2627 Giraffe Lives Matter, I guess. 1.2841 0.06249 88 69 13 6
2628 So I know we’re gonna address the elephant in the room but are are we really not gonna talk about the giraffe? 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
2629 Why does the giraffe always choose Animal House on its turn for movie night? 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
2630 Can't see the TV, Geoffrey. Go back down for a while. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2631 We get to feed him pet him and the neighbor downstairs does the cleanup. It works out. 1.2809 0.05977 89 69 15 5
2632 Walk-up apartment for rent- Nature so close you can smell it. 1.2809 0.05977 89 69 15 5
2633 At least we don't live downstairs. 1.2809 0.05051 89 65 23 1
2634 How'd that hole get here? 1.2809 0.05759 89 68 17 4
2635 So much for our empty nest" 1.2809 0.05759 89 68 17 4
2636 The brochure said “incomparable amenities.” 1.2809 0.05977 89 69 15 5
2637 'Well, I thought they were referring to a scenic view when they said we could see the Zoo from the apartment" 1.2809 0.06390 89 71 11 7
2638 Hey Layla! Can you please move. I can't see the TV! 1.2809 0.05977 89 69 15 5
2639 i still cant believe we won the giraffle 1.2809 0.05533 89 67 19 3
2640 No wonder why Neckflix was free this month 1.2809 0.06187 89 70 13 6
2641 Don't worry Fred, you haven't missed anything. But I have to warn you: we are out of popcorn. 1.2809 0.05759 89 68 17 4
2642 I’m more upset that it’s blocking my view of the tv than anything else at this point. 1.2809 0.05759 89 68 17 4
2643 You were supposed to fix that hole 1.2809 0.05533 89 67 19 3
2644 We’re lucky. Before Noah got divorced and moved in downstairs, he had TWO of these! 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2645 What elephant?" 1.2791 0.06111 86 67 14 5
2646 I think he should get his own Netflix login. 1.2791 0.05139 86 63 22 1
2647 At least we're not in the apartment below. 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2648 Why is there a giraffe coming out of the floor?! 1.2791 0.06544 86 69 10 7
2649 Yes, it's unique. But now we have to move the TV. 1.2791 0.06331 86 68 12 6
2650 The tenants downstairs have to provide a ring toss. 1.2791 0.06111 86 67 14 5
2651 How was I to know that's what they meant by pet sitting in the comfort of your own home? 1.2791 0.06111 86 67 14 5
2652 It’s OK. He’s still growing. 1.2791 0.05398 86 64 20 2
2653 Maybe we should have gone with the coffee table instead. 1.2791 0.04865 86 62 24 0
2654 We don't normally see giraffes at this altitude. 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2655 Giraffes, man. Like, what the fuck? 1.2791 0.06111 86 67 14 5
2656 Nah, I haven't tried yet. The guy downstairs says she bites. 1.2791 0.05398 86 64 20 2
2657 I didn't feel comfortable giving her our Netflix password. 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2658 She only wants to watch Netflix with us," you said. Happy now 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2659 Dang, this acid is strong 1.2791 0.06544 86 69 10 7
2660 ...male giraffes usually follow females around on the grassland until..." "We probably should switch channel. I'm not sure if Dan's old enough for this. 1.2791 0.06544 86 69 10 7
2661 I'm glad a two level apartment was available on such a short notice. 1.2791 0.05139 86 63 22 1
2662 Maybe we shouldn’t move to the first floor. 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2663 A true breakthrough! 1.2791 0.05398 86 64 20 2
2664 I wish he'd call before popping in. 1.2791 0.05139 86 63 22 1
2665 It is expensive, but I prefer the cost of feeding over what the guy downstairs is dealing with. 1.2791 0.05398 86 64 20 2
2666 which browser did you use to book? Was it Safari? 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2667 I told you that it was a bad idea to say “pets welcome“ when we listed the downstairs with Airbnb. 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2668 Finally something new to talk about. 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2669 The reviews said it was a pet-friendly building. 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2670 I suppose we're lucky they didn't adopt a rescue elephant. 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2671 I thought we' d be safe on the third floor but apparently they've been giving him that milk with the growth hormones. 1.2791 0.05139 86 63 22 1
2672 Even the keepers have to work from home. 1.2791 0.05398 86 64 20 2
2673 When the real estate agents told us "heads us" I thought they meant caution. 1.2791 0.06331 86 68 12 6
2674 Would you rather agonize with finding acacia leaves or deal what the guy in 2B has to shovel. 1.2791 0.05398 86 64 20 2
2675 Psilocybin Counseling was a spectacular idea, honey! 1.2791 0.06111 86 67 14 5
2676 I'm glad we dispensed with the elephant in the room. 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2677 The apartment below was cheaper, but I like the view from here. 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2678 Could you change the channel? 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2679 They said the hole in the floor would explain itself. 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2680 Well, at least we got the half that eats. 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2681 So what's this now? Banksy or more gaslighting by the president? 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2682 Its a shame the apartments with high ceilings were filled. 1.2791 0.05398 86 64 20 2
2683 There's nothing we can do. She bought the air rights. 1.2791 0.05398 86 64 20 2
2684 You did ask for someone who would stick his neck out for us. 1.2791 0.05139 86 63 22 1
2685 When’s it his turn to make the popcorn? 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2686 The fact that Geoffrey is still living with us ,is the big elephant in the room. 1.2791 0.06331 86 68 12 6
2687 Wow, this virtual safari is pretty realistic. 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2688 Please Alan, I can’t see the screen! 1.2791 0.06331 86 68 12 6
2689 As far as pets go, I think we got the better end! 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2690 Did you remember to turn off the oven? 1.2791 0.03161 86 72 10 4
2691 Do you think he misunderstood the word “shrink”? 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2692 Well, I didn't see this one coming. 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2693 The elephant in the room is not what it claims to be. 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2694 They did say it featured unique architecture. 1.2791 0.06111 86 67 14 5
2695 nothing suprises me nowadays 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2696 Well, with the way the real estate market has been, the co-op board has had to make some concessions on allowing pets. 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2697 Well honey, I guess this is what they call the ‘new normal’ 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2698 The things we agree to for 10% off... 1.2791 0.05398 86 64 20 2
2699 I knew that I shouldn’t have had that last drink 1.2791 0.05646 86 65 18 3
2700 Madagascar again! I told you not to get Disney+ 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2701 Trust me, we’re getting the better end of this arrangement. 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
2702 This Airbnb in Savana is very incredible 1.2791 0.05139 86 68 14 4
2703 Talk was fine. We should not have taken red pill, blue pill or any damn pill. 1.2785 0.05958 79 60 16 3
2704 See, we're making progress, it's no longer an elephant in the room. 1.2759 0.05590 87 66 18 3
2705 It's hiding from Donald Trump Jr. 1.2759 0.05824 87 67 16 4
2706 Apparently, she needs it for emotional support. 1.2759 0.05345 87 65 20 2
2707 Is this a variation on whack-a-mole? 1.2759 0.05345 87 65 20 2
2708 I wondered what that hole was for ! 1.2759 0.05345 87 65 20 2
2709 Your building has a really liberal pet policy, Jane. 1.2759 0.05824 87 67 16 4
2710 I'm having second thoughts about staying in this Air B 'n' G. 1.2759 0.05590 87 66 18 3
2711 I definitely think we got the better end of the deal. 1.2759 0.06266 87 69 12 6
2712 why couldn't you have just settled for a dog? 1.2759 0.06049 87 68 14 5
2713 Did you include internet in her share of the rent? 1.2759 0.05345 87 65 20 2
2714 When they asked if we minded if they got an exotic pet, I never imagined... 1.2759 0.05824 87 67 16 4
2715 I'll cancel the trophy hunt with Don Jr. 1.2759 0.05345 87 65 20 2
2716 Who would’ve ever guessed that the elephant in the room would be a giraffe. 1.2759 0.05345 87 65