Contest #711


Cartoon

711

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “All his pitches have been inside.”
  2. “Seriously, you wouldn’t believe my seats.”
  3. “I have to hang up. I’m on deck.”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2020-05-24T17:55:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2020-06-14T18:13:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2020-06-01T18:03:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued June 8 & 15, 2020
Number of captions 7650
Number of responses 1053338
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Yes, it's a home game. Of course it's a home game. Everything's a fricking home game. 2.3176 0.00582 15014 2262 5749 7003
1 I'm really looking forward to the away games. 2.1376 0.01219 3591 745 1607 1239
2 3rd month, nobody out. 2.1241 0.00976 6327 1562 2418 2347
3 Well the catcher is wearing a mask but everyone else is just staying six feet apart 2.0821 0.00638 13701 3345 5904 4452
4 I hope to God they find a cure before football season. 2.0751 0.00702 12324 3355 4707 4262
5 The bases are loaded and, frankly, so am I 2.0568 0.00721 12070 3506 4388 4176
6 They’re all high and inside. 2.0462 0.00760 11632 3701 3715 4216
7 Look, it got them to put on pants 2.0387 0.00720 11332 3154 4601 3577
8 When they said MLB would be back in our living rooms, I had no idea. 2.0330 0.00932 6694 1841 2791 2062
9 Yes... I'd like to cancel my live sports package. 2.0266 0.01399 3193 956 1196 1041
10 I’m sure working from home IS nice when you’re married to a chef, Janet. 2.0190 0.01419 3051 909 1175 967
11 It’s like “Field of Dreams” without the field or the dreams.” 1.9857 0.00929 7071 2223 2732 2116
12 Yes, he surprised me with a diamond, all right. 1.9832 0.00971 6319 1935 2555 1829
13 Bottom of the 427th, I think. 1.9690 0.01440 3033 1002 1123 908
14 No mother, he has not gotten to first base. 1.9645 0.01045 5632 1835 2162 1635
15 We're just having game night. What about you? 1.9505 0.00862 7621 2383 3244 1994
16 I'm not so sure about being safe at home. 1.9480 0.01096 4712 1463 2031 1218
17 I'm praying for a no-hitter. 1.9446 0.00906 7028 2279 2877 1872
18 I'd like to order four hot dogs, 2 boxes of Cracker Jack and 2 sheets of drywall. 1.9433 0.00973 6441 2172 2469 1800
19 It’s fine honey, we’re wearing masks and gloves. 1.9153 0.01229 3707 1208 1605 894
20 I’m safe at home. How are you? 1.9147 0.00741 10447 3518 4317 2612
21 The last time I got to third base on this sofa, the Pirates were in the World Series. 1.9120 0.00892 7929 2902 2831 2196
22 Turns out they also come if you don't build it. 1.8997 0.00961 6831 2558 2410 1863
23 It’s just like being at the ballpark. We even booed the President during the national anthem! 1.8921 0.01064 5617 2155 1927 1535
24 No, it really does feel like I'm at the ballpark, ignoring the game, and talking to you on my phone. 1.8897 0.00972 5811 1998 2475 1338
25 Depends on what you mean by safe at home. 1.8699 0.00903 6872 2471 2841 1560
26 Trust me, it’s not the bases that are loaded. 1.8580 0.01497 2619 981 1029 609
27 The bases are empty. We're loaded. 1.8578 0.01051 5571 2195 1984 1392
28 The away games are in the garage. 1.8522 0.01719 2064 804 761 499
29 I'd wish I had been quarantined with a chef 1.8490 0.00966 6431 2520 2374 1537
30 Okay. Tell grandma to start getting loose in the bullpen. 1.8463 0.01161 4515 1774 1661 1080
31 I have to hang up. I'm on deck. 1.8434 0.00905 7160 2771 2749 1640
32 Three strikes and you still can't go out 1.8430 0.02467 1013 404 364 245
33 Can I call you back? It's the bottom of the ninth. 1.8423 0.01163 4197 1575 1709 913
34 Janet, you'll never believe the seats I have for this game. 1.8414 0.01223 3790 1422 1547 821
35 Well, I asked him to pitch in around the house, but he brushed off my signal and threw me a curve. 1.8382 0.01631 2207 855 854 498
36 Hang on, the cat is stealing 2nd. 1.8302 0.02573 907 362 337 208
37 No, I think the real problem will be hockey season. 1.8240 0.01065 4937 1918 1980 1039
38 I'm sorry, but my husband can't come to the phone right now. He's in the kitchen playing center field. 1.8235 0.02410 997 392 389 216
39 No, but i am worried about horse racing season 1.8222 0.01395 3138 1287 1122 729
40 Yes, I said I wish I was high and outside. 1.8198 0.01284 3795 1603 1278 914
41 I'm not worried, he can't hit and a walk will put him in the front closet. 1.8179 0.01193 4145 1683 1540 922
42 Hold on Cheryl, I think the hot dog guy is at the door. 1.8165 0.01312 3232 1249 1327 656
43 Still no score. Top of the 189th. 1.8101 0.01123 4913 2118 1627 1168
44 Harold's dream came true. He's pitching the home opener. 1.8081 0.01253 3512 1384 1424 704
45 I'm the scorekeeper, the beer vendor and third base. 1.8035 0.01259 3587 1441 1410 736
46 He says he's trying to flatten the curve. 1.7937 0.01150 4323 1781 1656 886
47 Seriously, you wouldn’t believe my seats. 1.7921 0.01088 4565 1857 1820 888
48 No, I’m not just playing third base, I am third base. 1.7897 0.01186 3756 1498 1561 697
49 Yes, he’s working from home too. Why do you ask? 1.7874 0.00965 5927 2437 2328 1162
50 I’ve been through all 67 pages of the covid rules. The hardest one was telling them they can’t spit. 1.7783 0.01696 2007 851 750 406
51 It could have been worse. Cheryl’s husband is an equestrian. 1.7747 0.01186 4048 1719 1525 804
52 All his pitches have been inside. 1.7693 0.01234 3659 1554 1401 704
53 ...I'm talking to Dr. Fauci and he said "Grabbing your crotch is okay." 1.7624 0.01496 2832 1316 874 642
54 These days they’re all home games 1.7602 0.01671 1860 759 788 313
55 I’ll have to call you back. It’s the bottom of the 9th and the cat is on deck 1.7520 0.01107 4794 2156 1673 965
56 Yes, Ted, he's hard at work--in fact, he's pitching a client right now. 1.7519 0.01192 3873 1665 1504 704
57 When I agreed he could have the boys here for a game, I thought he meant poker. 1.7512 0.02040 1282 541 519 222
58 It’s not the same without the rest of the crowd, but the beer’s cheaper and no line at the restroom. 1.7502 0.01381 2762 1171 1115 476
59 I was going to make cookies, but Amazon delivered the wrong batter. 1.7486 0.01778 1925 888 633 404
60 How should I know who's on first? I don't even know what day it is anymore. 1.7409 0.02974 660 300 231 129
61 I signed up for ‘relief pitcher’ thinking there’d be margaritas... 1.7352 0.02307 1084 494 383 207
62 Oh, nothing much, just watching the game. 1.7248 0.01389 2769 1230 1073 466
63 I’m actually thinking of giving him the videogame console back. 1.7209 0.01456 2512 1122 971 419
64 It’s actually even more boring than on TV. 1.7196 0.01452 2764 1311 921 532
65 I think the pitcher is Purelling the ball, is that legal? 1.7154 0.01539 2266 1030 854 382
66 This takes high and inside to a whole new level 1.7146 0.02141 1230 572 437 221
67 I thought I missed baseball, but I actually miss him watching baseball. 1.7139 0.02315 1010 459 381 170
68 Trust me, the bases aren't the only thing loaded around here. 1.7135 0.01491 2415 1106 900 409
69 I don't care if you tested positive, I'm coming over. 1.7125 0.01762 1969 966 603 400
70 Can I call you back? I’m in the middle of a game. 1.7081 0.01259 3409 1564 1276 569
71 He's 3 and 2 with the cat on deck. 1.7045 0.02816 704 331 250 123
72 No, but they did quit spitting. 1.7011 0.03460 455 212 167 76
73 One out? I want them ALL out! 1.6969 0.01630 2214 1088 709 417
74 Sure I’ll recap...Who has toilet paper is on first, what day it is on second, I don’t know how to make sourdough starter on third. 1.6942 0.01898 1658 826 513 319
75 It's the bottom of the ninth and two windows are out 1.6923 0.01589 2265 1103 756 406
76 Yes, Mom--the boys are six feet apart, and the catcher is wearing a mask. 1.6878 0.01607 2050 962 766 322
77 “I’d let them play outside but only the catcher has a mask “ 1.6821 0.01475 2340 1098 893 349
78 At least it's not hunting season. 1.6808 0.01623 2187 1095 697 395
79 Bunt...PLEASE BUNT! 1.6750 0.01660 1923 923 702 298
80 Hi Linda, I was wondering whether we could upgrade our home insurance plan? 1.6744 0.01910 1428 680 533 215
81 The wife. In the family room. With a baseball bat. 1.6742 0.02372 1111 587 299 225
82 It's actually not that bad — aside from the spitting. 1.6737 0.01507 2311 1114 840 357
83 Of course I want them to stop... but our best hitter is up and we're down by two runs. 1.6735 0.01869 1510 725 553 232
84 I'd be less annoyed if the catcher wasn't the only one wearing a mask. 1.6723 0.01684 1718 792 697 229
85 I'm waiting for the 7th inning stretch so I can vacuum the field. 1.6709 0.01862 1480 708 553 219
86 Well, I'm hoping for a no hitter! 1.6623 0.01925 1359 649 520 190
87 I hope there’s a vaccine before football season 1.6621 0.01760 1740 862 604 274
88 Next pandemic I plan to be married to a book editor. 1.6601 0.01750 1821 932 580 309
89 I think the cat is stealing signs. 1.6593 0.01816 1755 916 524 315
90 I know, Mom, but at some point it went from fantasy to full-on delusion. 1.6583 0.01817 1703 869 547 287
91 The worst part is that they’re charging me $10 for each beer I already had in the fridge. 1.6561 0.01690 1954 1004 621 329
92 I just wish they'd quit spitting. 1.6554 0.01591 2220 1140 706 374
93 So we agree - I trade you all three for two jumbo paper towels and a player to be named later 1.6554 0.03004 592 295 206 91
94 Not now. I'm on deck. 1.6523 0.01759 1625 789 612 224
95 No, it’s a home game. 1.6522 0.01644 1975 990 682 303
96 Do you deliver? Great, I would like a hot dog and a beer please! 1.6473 0.01660 1965 1003 653 309
97 Hold on, I have to make another call. 1.6472 0.02786 669 333 239 97
98 The virus has been over for six years? 1.6414 0.02051 1319 692 410 217
99 I never miss a home game. 1.6412 0.01726 1742 879 610 253
100 Well, as Yogi said ‘If the world were perfect, it wouldn’t be. 1.6366 0.02331 1010 527 323 160
101 No, I’m not stuck at home. I’m stuck on third. 1.6362 0.01757 1652 831 591 230
102 I’m not sure about the the bases, but we are all loaded 1.6343 0.01941 1444 753 466 225
103 Don't worry mom, no one has gotten to third base. 1.6263 0.01900 1496 795 468 233
104 I miss leaving early. 1.6253 0.02509 814 418 283 113
105 Well, the homeschooling isn't going so well, but we've nailed the extracurriculars. 1.6241 0.02118 1136 583 397 156
106 Bottom of the ninth, this pitch will decide who does the dishes 1.6229 0.02485 830 428 287 115
107 Oh, I'm not worried...he couldn't hit water if he fell out of a boat. 1.6208 0.02566 828 442 258 128
108 Just watching the game. You? 1.6177 0.01966 1308 676 456 176
109 It was so much better when I was able to change the channel. 1.6155 0.02795 632 324 227 81
110 It was either this, or let him keep talking about his sourdough starter. 1.6150 0.02095 1257 689 366 202
111 Hi Roger, do you think we will be out of quarantine by football season? Yeah? No reason just checking 1.6145 0.02015 1271 667 427 177
112 This is why we can’t have nice things. 1.6117 0.02935 649 356 189 104
113 No, not cleaning. I said spring training. You? 1.6080 0.02257 949 488 345 116
114 #97253 on list of things which are not as stupid as injecting disinfectants. 1.6072 0.02334 1054 593 283 178
115 No, nothing new here.....just about to order some new lamps, vases, maybe a window or two. 1.6066 0.02137 1144 612 370 162
116 I obviously misunderstood when they said they needed a home base. 1.6056 0.02096 1136 603 381 152
117 I didn’t build it, they just came. 1.6051 0.02481 818 431 279 108
118 Bottom of the 9th and it's Covid-19, sanity 0. 1.6049 0.02213 1106 614 319 173
119 Just another Tuesday. Saturday is bowling night when things really happen. 1.6028 0.02315 919 481 322 116
120 I suppose you’re right, Steve is lucky — not everyone can work from home. 1.5996 0.02142 1034 535 378 121
121 Home games have taken on a whole new meaning this season 1.5958 0.02270 945 498 331 116
122 Yes, we're taking precautions - he's not throwing spitballs. 1.5951 0.02244 988 534 323 131
123 Yeah, great seats. Third base line. 1.5932 0.02263 976 523 327 126
124 Yes, yes, I’m sure. I can be in the office as soon as it’s open. 1.5930 0.02335 919 493 307 119
125 Hello, I’d like to place an order for some peanuts and crackerjacks. 1.5919 0.02336 958 528 294 136
126 This gives home games a whole new meaning 1.5887 0.02362 924 506 292 126
127 I got us amazing seats. 1.5883 0.02408 906 501 277 128
128 It's still boring... 1.5867 0.02477 888 501 253 134
129 Helen, I've gotta go. It's the the bottom of the ninth, score's tied, I'm on third, and here comes the three-two pitch. 1.5859 0.02404 896 494 279 123
130 I guess you could call it a home game. 1.5856 0.03034 514 272 183 59
131 Yes, that's right. Please deliver some peanuts and crackerjacks to apt. 404. 1.5839 0.02420 858 468 279 111
132 Yes, safe at home. 1.5824 0.02353 843 461 279 103
133 He sounds wonderful, Diane, but right now I'm playing the field. 1.5814 0.02696 688 376 224 88
134 No, he's not home yet. 1.5806 0.02476 825 464 247 114
135 You know, the winning caption always comes out of left field. 1.5797 0.02580 816 465 229 122
136 So... you said that all of this was caused by a bat, right? 1.5791 0.02589 796 450 231 115
137 Hold on, Sally. It looks like I might get to third base for the first time in twenty years. 1.5785 0.03749 344 186 117 41
138 Honestly? I'm just so happy to be able to see some live sports. 1.5782 0.02370 806 424 298 84
139 Can you clarify the infield fly rule for a venue with a ten-foot ceiling? 1.5782 0.02497 806 449 250 107
140 Janet? This is Donna in 6C. Is your Billy a lefty? 1.5745 0.02593 785 445 229 111
141 I have to go Mom, I'm doing play by play. 1.5737 0.02480 760 411 263 86
142 Oh right, yes, sorry the Yankees vs. Mariners is Apt 4-b 1.5714 0.02658 756 433 214 109
143 Well, yeah, but they warned us sports would look different when it came back 1.5690 0.02958 522 280 187 55
144 Hold on, Barbara––I have to do the wave. 1.5652 0.02680 690 386 218 86
145 Hold on—our Airbnb host is calling for some reason. 1.5640 0.02791 672 386 193 93
146 Well, the score is at one broken window and a dead cat 1.5634 0.02718 639 351 216 72
147 What I approved was 'game night with the guys.' 1.5629 0.02683 684 383 217 84
148 I was all for father-son bonding, but spitting on the carpet is starting to get to me. 1.5614 0.02648 668 367 227 74
149 I can't say anything. He's got a no-hitter going. 1.5586 0.02718 648 361 212 75
150 Every hit is a home-run now 1.5586 0.02725 657 369 209 79
151 I'm gonna be late for the Zoom meeting. The game just went into extra innings. 1.5586 0.02763 657 376 196 85
152 God, it feels like I'm living in a New Yorker cartoon caption contest. 1.5580 0.02898 638 374 172 92
153 I'm gonna have to let you go. We've got runners in scoring position at the ottoman and china cabinet. 1.5569 0.02820 641 368 189 84
154 Oh he's still in a fantasy league, Elaine, it's just a very different fantasy. 1.5559 0.02764 617 343 205 69
155 I’m managing. How about you? 1.5557 0.02878 628 367 174 87
156 Well, last week he let me have my book club over. 1.5552 0.02853 634 367 182 85
157 OK, Sally, let me go, the cat has to use the pitchers mound again. 1.5515 0.02997 602 358 156 88
158 I was so worried when I overheard him telling his friends that he was a switch hitter 1.5503 0.02935 596 347 170 79
159 Hello? I’d like to report a hit and run. 1.5498 0.02934 582 343 161 78
160 Gotta go, Mom. I'm on deck. 1.5496 0.02851 595 338 187 70
161 Life's been throwing me a lot of curve balls lately. 1.5495 0.02974 546 310 172 64
162 Settlement? Not a chance. You tell your client we're ready to play hardball. 1.5490 0.02893 561 315 184 62
163 I snagged great seats to the home opener. 1.5488 0.02904 594 343 176 75
164 Not another screwball, we’ve already got one in the White House! 1.5481 0.03172 582 361 123 98
165 he's not the only one striking out tonight 1.5475 0.02951 579 336 169 74
166 So far every pitch has been inside. 1.5475 0.02931 579 334 173 72
167 Hello? House that Ruth built, Ruth speaking. 1.5464 0.03732 377 223 102 52
168 Hi Dad, remember that Ming vase on the mantel? 1.5464 0.02930 582 337 172 73
169 Oh sorry Mom I was trying to dial the bullpen. 1.5456 0.03066 548 322 153 73
170 Yes, it feels like the real thing! I just paid $16 for a beer from my own fridge! 1.5455 0.03523 385 219 122 44
171 Hey! Pick up your New Yorker! I’m in a cartoon! 1.5452 0.03802 387 236 91 60
172 ...yes, we are homeschooling the kids... they're in PE right now 1.5451 0.02933 565 324 174 67
173 Not good. Only one is wearing a mask. 1.5448 0.02861 558 312 188 58
174 Yeah it's weird... I just went from spring cleaning to spring training 1.5442 0.03301 441 252 138 51
175 Well Tom Hanks was definitely wrong about one thing.....there IS crying in baseball! 1.5433 0.02965 543 310 171 62
176 No, no, no... I asked you to take me OUT to the ballgame. 1.5433 0.02919 543 306 179 58
177 No, even this close it’s really not that exciting 1.5430 0.03093 547 325 147 75
178 ...And I’ll tell ya, it’s almost as depressing as watching the Mets. 1.5393 0.03034 521 300 161 60
179 You know, there is nothing like the atmosphere of an at-home game 1.5392 0.03038 523 302 160 61
180 What do you mean you don't deliver peanuts? 1.5392 0.03041 536 313 157 66
181 Baseball is OK. It's the water polo that drives me crazy. 1.5371 0.03160 512 304 141 67
182 We're good. Twelve feet to the batter's box, and the catcher is wearing a mask. 1.5371 0.03012 512 292 165 55
183 Just called to touch base 1.5365 0.03159 520 311 139 70
184 It's the bottom of the 120th Inning 1.5354 0.03167 508 302 140 66
185 I’ve had enough of these innings - I need an outing. 1.5332 0.03038 512 296 159 57
186 Hurry over. I can’t do the wave by myself. 1.5328 0.03600 366 212 113 41
187 The AirBNB listing said no parties, it said nothing about playoffs. 1.5317 0.03086 504 294 152 58
188 Please, PLEASE, take me out to the ball game. Just. Take. Me. Out. 1.5311 0.03218 482 286 136 60
189 No, only one of them is wearing a mask. 1.5309 0.03034 486 276 162 48
190 I know Suzanne, I never thought I’d say this either, but I need them to bring back professional and college sporting events RIGHT NOW 1.5307 0.03236 473 280 135 58
191 Hello. I'd like to report a hit-and-run. 1.5303 0.03192 479 282 140 57
192 Joanne it’s fine, he gets the house in the divorce. 1.5302 0.03182 464 269 144 51
193 Maureen? Stephanie? Please come pick up your husbands from spring training. 1.5283 0.03047 477 271 160 46
194 You've got to come help me. Only one of them is wearing a mask and no one is keeping their distance. 1.5272 0.03618 349 201 112 36
195 I'm interested in lowering my Homeowner's Policy deductible. 1.5252 0.03249 457 270 134 53
196 WHO’s on first 1.5244 0.03636 328 186 112 30
197 He hasn't been this excited to get to third base since we started dating twenty years ago." 1.5243 0.03200 452 263 141 48
198 So it's the bottom of the ninth, two outs, and I'm, I Don't Know, third base. 1.5243 0.03276 452 268 131 53
199 Oh crap, he's up again … the bastard who took out my crystal chandelier. 1.5241 0.03342 456 281 113 62
200 Oh, they've been binging Ken Burns. They're up to the 1969 World Series. When they start on The Civil War I'm locking myself in the garden shed. 1.5238 0.03692 378 230 98 50
201 At least we know the home team will win. 1.5235 0.03242 447 262 136 49
202 I just can't handle all the spitting and spanking. 1.5234 0.03277 449 266 131 52
203 For an extra ten bucks a month, I got the home game package. 1.5230 0.03601 369 218 109 42
204 Hello? I'm calling to cancel the new ESPN live package 1.5225 0.03320 444 265 126 53
205 Well, the bases are six feet apart. 1.5223 0.03190 448 260 142 46
206 Watching the second half of a double-header. You? 1.5221 0.03836 339 204 93 42
207 Sorry, he's out. 1.5212 0.03216 449 263 138 48
208 I've seen better pitchers at a Tupperware party! 1.5209 0.03510 430 266 104 60
209 Do me a favor. When your delivery guy gets to my door, have him yell 'BEER HERE!' 1.5188 0.03580 372 221 109 42
210 He can't hit anything inside. 1.5145 0.03320 414 251 116 47
211 You’ll have to speak louder, I’ve got the game on. 1.5133 0.03245 413 239 136 38
212 God, I miss poker nights. 1.5133 0.03245 413 239 136 38
213 I kind of miss the Away games. 1.5131 0.03368 419 251 121 47
214 I didn't build it, but they came anyway. 1.5131 0.03351 419 255 115 49
215 I'm starting to hate home field advantage. 1.5131 0.03385 419 252 119 48
216 It's gonna be a fast ball, Edna. Bang on the garbage can lid. 1.5127 0.03723 353 214 97 42
217 Apparently we have season tickets. 1.5127 0.04068 275 162 85 28
218 He's batting. May I take a message? 1.5123 0.03517 406 249 106 51
219 Evidently, only an umpire can throw them out.” 1.5123 0.03358 406 240 124 42
220 No, I don't know who's on first. 1.5123 0.03552 406 251 102 53
221 There are no away games anymore. Only the ones at home. 1.5121 0.03398 414 249 118 47
222 Yup, the boys are all home. No, no, it’s okay-they’re being pretty good sports about it. 1.5112 0.03219 401 229 139 33
223 It’s all good until they start spitting”.. 1.5109 0.03502 411 253 106 52
224 Don't worry Mom, they stand six feet apart and the catcher wears a mask. 1.5108 0.03305 415 245 128 42
225 Yes, we're in your house right now. 1.5053 0.03622 380 235 98 47
226 We've seen feline interference and parental heckling, and it's only the bottom of the first. 1.5039 0.03393 385 228 120 37
227 Yes it's back. I'm watching live baseball from my living room sofa. 1.5039 0.03511 385 234 108 43
228 The virus has convinced Dan and me that we don't want to have any children. We'll tell the kids right after the ballgame. 1.5039 0.03706 389 248 86 55
229 Curiously, every time she meowed twice, he threw a curve ball. 1.5027 0.03621 372 229 99 44
230 This is really hitting close to home. 1.5027 0.03527 374 226 108 40
231 The mice are gone, but now I can't get rid of these damn Yankees. 1.5017 0.03801 299 176 96 27
232 The sad part is that ESPN is actually carrying this game live and rebroadcasting it tonight with pitch-by-pitch analysis from a panel of our neighbors. 1.5013 0.03610 379 235 98 46
233 Yes, Gail, I am also having very vivid quarantine dreams. 1.5000 0.03569 368 224 104 40
234 Since they're playing in the house, all runs will be counted as a home runs. 1.5000 0.03453 368 226 103 39
235 you would not believe my seats 1.4987 0.03485 371 223 111 37
236 One ball, two strikes, cat on third. What's up with you? 1.4987 0.03649 371 231 95 45
237 Yeah, Ma. I wish we’d had daughters, too. 1.4986 0.03582 369 226 102 41
238 I've heard of a home team advantage, but this is ridiculous. 1.4973 0.03469 364 217 113 34
239 Watching baseball. How about you 1.4973 0.03681 364 227 93 44
240 I wondered what I was doing on the sofa, ... and then it hit me 1.4972 0.03548 362 219 106 37
241 Guys, Dr. Fauci says the catcher's mask is ineffective. 1.4972 0.03690 360 224 93 43
242 It's like baseball, but the batter never leaves home. 1.4972 0.03429 360 212 117 31
243 I told him if he played his cards right, tonight I'd let him go to third base. 1.4958 0.03533 361 218 107 36
244 Yup, baseball is still boring. 1.4957 0.03468 351 212 106 33
245 Well, I've had to make some concessions. 1.4957 0.03572 351 219 93 39
246 Ya, they keep calling themselves a Quaranteam. 1.4943 0.03636 350 214 99 37
247 It’s safe. The catcher has a mask, and the players are six feet apart. 1.4929 0.03500 353 211 110 32
248 I got seats on the third base line. 1.4928 0.03590 347 210 103 34
249 This is the most action I’ve gotten in weeks 1.4928 0.03659 347 213 97 37
250 Only one of them is wearing a mask? That's your problem with this? 1.4927 0.03564 341 204 106 31
251 Oh, it's just the usual here, honey - bottom of the 9th, 2 outs. The cat makes a great short stop though. 1.4911 0.03659 338 206 98 34
252 Nothin' much, just sitting in the den watching the ball game 1.4911 0.03683 338 207 96 35
253 I think the cat is the umpire. 1.4896 0.03642 337 205 99 33
254 Suddenly a Home Run didn’t seem like a good idea 1.4882 0.03619 340 207 100 33
255 Really gives a new meaning to home run 1.4882 0.03619 340 207 100 33
256 So I said to myself, ‘How much harm could it do?’ 1.4881 0.03551 336 201 106 29
257 Hello, I’d like to cancel my sports channel subscription. It appears I’m getting free home games. 1.4880 0.03632 332 201 100 31
258 Let me call you back. I might actually have to run. 1.4878 0.03689 328 200 96 32
259 It was either baseball or practicing his bagpipes. 1.4843 0.03977 318 204 74 40
260 Marilyn regretted suggesting her son try pitching a bit more inside. 1.4831 0.03687 325 199 95 31
261 I didn't build anything and they *still* came. 1.4830 0.03906 294 181 84 29
262 I know, but at least it's gotten them off the couch... 1.4828 0.03657 319 193 98 28
263 Pedro’s on the mound, Johnny’s catching, and Willy’s at bat. I’m sitting comfortably at third. 1.4828 0.03789 319 198 88 33
264 I told him he better not step in this house again unless he brought a diamond with him. 1.4828 0.03854 319 203 79 37
265 Come on over-we can have up to 10 fans. 1.4828 0.03710 319 195 94 30
266 Don't worry, I'm safe here; it's the Mets. 1.4828 0.03892 319 202 80 37
267 A home run is still in the bedroom. 1.4811 0.03875 318 201 81 36
268 Fortunately, he bunts a lot. 1.4811 0.03665 318 193 97 28
269 I've got ultra-high-definition television, it's like they're right here.... 1.4809 0.03886 314 198 81 35
270 I was benched in the bottom of the 3rd. 1.4809 0.03670 314 190 97 27
271 Yeah I’m getting sick of him, but one more strike and he’s out. 1.4804 0.03738 306 186 93 27
272 I spend most of the day vacuuming sunflower shells 1.4795 0.03700 317 194 94 29
273 I am pretty sure it will be a home run. 1.4795 0.03884 317 201 80 36
274 I’d like to cancel my subscription to ESPN Live. 1.4795 0.03986 317 205 72 40
275 We have the home field advantage 1.4791 0.03610 311 186 101 24
276 I gotta go - they want me in Left Field. 1.4787 0.03859 305 190 84 31
277 Nothing. You? 1.4787 0.03659 305 183 98 24
278 Yes, I'd like to order takeout, please. Just the one order of peanuts and cracker jacks. No thanks, I don't care if they ever get back. 1.4786 0.03917 280 171 84 25
279 Bottom of the ninth. You? 1.4785 0.03878 303 189 83 31
280 Trust me, this isn’t the only time today he is going to strike out. 1.4785 0.03989 303 193 75 35
281 There's apparently a position called a "bitcher"? 1.4785 0.03962 303 192 77 34
282 Yeah, I think under the circumstances, I'm cancelling the ESPN sports pack. 1.4785 0.03906 303 190 81 32
283 The fine china? Unfortunately, there was a grand slam. 1.4778 0.03700 293 175 96 22
284 Three strikes and you're....still inside. 1.4778 0.03854 293 180 86 27
285 Me? I'm watching the ballgame. What are you doing? 1.4776 0.03658 312 189 97 26
286 Sorry have to go, it's family game night 1.4771 0.03794 306 189 88 29
287 High and inside. You?” 1.4751 0.03952 301 191 77 33
288 Well, Mother, right now I think he is sending mixed signals. 1.4746 0.03650 295 176 98 21
289 I know that I’m supposed to “root, root, root, for the home team” but they’ve already broken a lamp and now have grandma warming up in the garage... 1.4746 0.03983 295 187 76 32
290 Yeah, there’s still no joy in Mudville. 1.4744 0.03914 293 183 81 29
291 Yeah, they said they'd install the dishwasher after the seventh inning. 1.4742 0.03903 291 181 82 28
292 Well, I wouldn't have bought the tickets to begin with if I had known that this is what you meant by a home game. 1.4735 0.03822 283 172 88 23
293 This isn’t the diamond I was asking for...” 1.4730 0.03972 296 188 76 32
294 We might be going extra innings. Can I call you back tomorrow? 1.4730 0.03673 296 178 96 22
295 High and Inside 1.4724 0.04091 290 187 69 34
296 If you hit mom, that's a foul. 1.4724 0.03943 290 182 79 29
297 I even charged myself $12 for a hotdog. 1.4724 0.03912 290 181 81 28
298 They broke the TV, what else am I supposed to watch? 1.4708 0.04007 291 188 70 33
299 Let’s let him face one more before we call dad up from the basement. 1.4702 0.03371 285 184 77 24
300 Jeff? Can you explain the infield fly rule again? 1.4702 0.04023 285 181 74 30
301 And I thought shutting down professional sports would be a blessing! 1.4701 0.03970 268 165 80 23
302 She’s talking to her sister, we can get another inning in” 1.4695 0.04086 279 178 71 30
303 Do you sell windows in bulk? 1.4694 0.03843 294 183 84 27
304 Yes, that's right: three straitjackets. 1.4685 0.03982 286 181 76 29
305 Hello, ESPN? I have something for your 7 to 10 slot. 1.4685 0.03824 286 176 86 24
306 Yep, it’s another home game. 1.4683 0.04048 284 184 68 32
307 Well, other than the fact I am sitting on third base, things are great. 1.4683 0.03907 284 177 81 26
308 I wish the season had started, then they would just be sitting on the couch. 1.4679 0.04075 280 179 71 30
309 Bunt! The vases are loaded! 1.4679 0.03979 280 181 69 30
310 Not what I was expecting when he said we would go to 3rd base tonight. 1.4676 0.04096 278 178 70 30
311 Well, I did want him home more. 1.4667 0.04017 270 169 76 25
312 Hi Margaret. I need the number for your divorce lawyer. My husband wants to play hardball. 1.4662 0.04156 281 183 65 33
313 I gotta go, Muriel. I think I'm in a New Yorker cartoon. 1.4662 0.04247 281 186 59 36
314 Yeah, we’re all safe at home. 1.4652 0.03917 273 169 81 23
315 Hello bullpen please send the relief pitcher in. He's in the bathroom. 1.4652 0.03917 273 169 81 23
316 I sound like I'm out in left field? Well, I am, kind of. 1.4652 0.04019 273 172 75 26
317 I have a homeowners insurance question. 1.4647 0.04129 269 172 69 28
318 If this thing isn't over by hockey season I don't know what I'm gonna do. 1.4635 0.04139 274 177 67 30
319 So far so good, but if he ever lets go of the ball all hell's gonna break loose. 1.4630 0.04124 257 162 71 24
320 Yeah, it’s still boring. 1.4627 0.03967 268 167 78 23
321 I'd love to tell you more but, any rebroadcast, retransmission, or account of this game, without the express written consent of Major League Baseball, is prohibited." 1.4627 0.04106 268 171 70 27
322 I have to call you back. I’m up next. 1.4627 0.04037 268 169 74 25
323 Why do I always fall for men who play games 1.4613 0.03901 271 168 81 22
324 These days, all the games are home games. 1.4613 0.04005 271 171 75 25
325 It's the bottom of the ninth and the players are loaded. 1.4613 0.03866 271 167 83 21
326 Next week? We're away. 1.4613 0.04039 271 172 73 26
327 Whatever keeps him from making more sourdough. 1.4610 0.04128 269 173 68 28
328 I'm getting very worried one of them is going to get a hit 1.4607 0.03942 267 166 79 22
329 Don’t you even think of throwing a breaking ball 1.4593 0.03910 270 168 80 22
330 I guess today’s a home game 1.4593 0.03945 270 169 78 23
331 The shortstop in the dining room said he loves the new hardwood floor. It gives a truer bounce than the old carpeting and really warms up the room. 1.4593 0.03910 270 168 80 22
332 When DR. Fauci said baseball would look different I don't think he meant this. 1.4574 0.04360 258 171 56 31
333 He keeps trying to get to second base... 1.4574 0.04074 258 163 72 23
334 When you said stay home and take one for the team I misunderstood. 1.4559 0.03966 261 163 77 21
335 I'm more surprised they put on pants. 1.4556 0.04025 259 163 74 22
336 This is not what I was picturing when you said you were starting a fantasy league. 1.4556 0.04277 259 170 60 29
337 Yup that's my complete order, just peanuts, popcorn and Cracker Jacks. 1.4556 0.04135 259 166 68 25
338 He has no idea that the cat has been stealing signs and tipping the pitches. 1.4556 0.04207 259 168 64 27
339 Mr. Mayor, you keep saying 'Safe at Home', but I think he was out. 1.4556 0.03987 259 162 76 21
340 Oh I’m the designated sitter. 1.4556 0.04025 259 163 74 22
341 Send me some peanuts and Crackerjack. 1.4556 0.03873 259 159 82 18
342 It's now two outs, with runners at the table and the couch... 1.4545 0.04167 253 162 67 24
343 I’ve been couched. 1.4545 0.04130 253 161 69 23
344 Marjorie, I have to go. I’ll call you back at the 7th inning stretch. 1.4545 0.04167 253 162 67 24
345 Sorry, I have to go. It's a 3-2 pitch and I'm on deck. 1.4542 0.03955 262 164 77 21
346 Yeah, the stadium's small, but the seats are fabulous. 1.4542 0.03804 262 160 85 17
347 Not much... Just Bobby trying to get to second base in the living room. 1.4542 0.03880 262 162 81 19
348 That's what I'd call a quarantine pitch: low and inside. 1.4542 0.04036 251 157 74 20
349 He broke up the no hitter in the fifth with a single to the kitchen. 1.4542 0.04114 251 159 70 22
350 Can I take a message? He's working from home at the moment. 1.4542 0.03996 251 156 76 19
351 We’ve got to adapt, Louise. A month ago I knew zilch about umpiring. 1.4541 0.04215 218 134 69 15
352 Hey. Well, I built it and they came. What do I do now? 1.4531 0.04019 256 161 74 21
353 It's all-you-can-eat hot dog day. It has been for about two months now. 1.4531 0.04169 256 165 66 25
354 You really need to read the fine print when you sign up for the 'live sports' cable package. 1.4528 0.04117 254 162 69 23
355 This new 8K TV? It’s like being there. 1.4514 0.04119 257 165 68 24
356 I’m just glad he’s getting dressed. 1.4512 0.03968 246 152 77 17
357 My roommate is having people over again and only one of them is wearing a mask. 1.4512 0.03968 246 152 77 17
358 Sure they break a few windows, but the line's a lot shorter for the ladies' room. 1.4512 0.04290 246 160 61 25
359 No Janice, they aren't playing real baseball, they're using a designated hitter 1.4512 0.04328 246 161 59 26
360 I just hope the relief pitcher is full of margaritas. 1.4506 0.04380 233 151 59 23
361 Our agreement was that afterwards they’d act out my soaps. 1.4498 0.04289 249 163 60 26
362 He's really stepped up to the plate recently. 1.4494 0.04039 247 155 73 19
363 I told them they can have two more innings. Then I'm resorting to nude yoga. 1.4494 0.04390 247 164 55 28
364 Hurry up -- this field needs to become a school by 9, a spin studio at 2, and a living room again after 6. 1.4490 0.04102 245 155 70 20
365 Yes unlike the last 20 times you've called I would like a free estimate on replacement window. 1.4490 0.04223 245 158 64 23
366 He asked me if this was Heaven. I said no, it’s Hoboken. 1.4481 0.04232 241 155 64 22
367 The preseason already cost us two windows and a vase. 1.4463 0.04178 242 155 66 21
368 Have to avoid kisscam; my boss thinks I'm at work 1.4463 0.03967 242 150 76 16
369 Well, it's better than last week when they thought they were Guy Fieri and Gordon Ramsay. 1.4458 0.04119 240 152 69 19
370 And they even made me sing the national anthem. 1.4458 0.04119 240 152 69 19
371 It’s a little too inside baseball for me. 1.4449 0.03976 245 153 75 17
372 Alexa, steal signs. 1.4449 0.04221 245 159 63 23
373 Honestly, the home team advantage is overrated 1.4444 0.03966 234 144 76 14
374 One day someone is going to hit it and we’re going to regret all of this!” 1.4435 0.04172 239 153 66 20
375 I know the catcher isn’t 6 feet away, but he’s wearing a mask. 1.4435 0.04214 239 154 64 21
376 Safe-at-home" has just taken on a new meaning here 1.4435 0.04214 239 154 64 21
377 Hi? yes you can just leave the cracker jacks outside the door, thanks 1.4430 0.04238 237 153 63 21
378 Why is only the catcher wearing a face mask? 1.4430 0.04153 237 151 67 19
379 I gotta go mom. Bruce keeps shaking off the signs and we all know how where that leads... 1.4426 0.03766 235 151 68 16
380 You should see the line for the bathroom. 1.4426 0.04390 235 155 56 24
381 Yeah, I also thought there was something fishy in that new cable deal promising 'It's just like watching the games in your living room.' 1.4426 0.04178 235 150 66 19
382 It's the bottom of the ninth, the cat is on deck, and I'm ready for a change-up. 1.4426 0.04000 235 146 74 15
383 We got tired of puzzles. 1.4426 0.04134 235 149 68 18
384 No, only the catcher is wearing a mask. 1.4410 0.04022 229 142 73 14
385 I stand corrected. The Ming vase is NOT the left-field foul pole. 1.4410 0.04208 229 146 65 18
386 It's not so bad. I'm dreading football season, though. 1.4397 0.03986 232 144 74 14
387 Normally I like watching the game, but this one just hits a little too close to home. 1.4391 0.04371 230 151 57 22
388 Whoever loses has to go out and try to find toilet paper for the family. 1.4391 0.04542 230 155 49 26
389 I just told Greg to touch base with his friends. 1.4391 0.04056 230 144 71 15
390 I should have read the fine print when I bought MLB Live. 1.4391 0.04284 230 149 61 20
391 It was cute when they were in second grade, but this lockdown’s been a lot longer than I expected. 1.4378 0.04200 233 155 56 22
392 Harold, this new TV brings baseball right into our living room! 1.4369 0.04345 222 144 59 19
393 You free? I’m about to intentionally walk out of my marriage. 1.4369 0.04529 222 148 51 23
394 Hi Mom, remember when you told me married life would throw me a few curve balls....? 1.4361 0.04184 227 145 65 17
395 I told him there are easier ways to get to third base. 1.4361 0.04138 227 144 67 16
396 Larry keeps spitting on the carpet. Jim just threatened to charge the mound. I never thought I'd say this, but we need pro baseball back on TV, now 1.4361 0.04367 227 149 57 21
397 It's the bottom of the ninth,bases loaded,score 5 to 4,count is 3 to 2. This next pitchT decides who does the dishes. 1.4356 0.04349 225 147 58 20
398 Flatten that curve! 1.4356 0.04303 225 146 60 19
399 I'm up next. Make it quick. 1.4356 0.04257 225 145 62 18
400 We're safe. I keep my distance, the catcher wears a mask, the batter stays at home, and the pitcher flattens the curve. 1.4356 0.04528 225 151 50 24
401 Sorry to hear you’re going batty with the family at home. Everything is perfectly normal here. 1.4350 0.04330 223 145 59 19
402 It's a compromise; They wanted rugby and I suggested chess. 1.4344 0.04164 221 140 66 15
403 Yes, I have one seat available Thursday night, recliner section. 1.4326 0.04442 215 141 55 19
404 Home schooling is okay. I teach them calculus, and my husband is the PE teacher who shows up to class drunk. 1.4326 0.04633 215 145 47 23
405 Heck no, I’m not a fan. I’m the owner. 1.4326 0.04343 215 139 59 17
406 With any luck, the pitcher will walk him. 1.4318 0.04175 220 140 65 15
407 Hi...Yes... I placed an order for peanuts and cracker jacks over an hour ago... 1.4312 0.04300 218 141 60 17
408 A League Of Their Home 1.4312 0.04445 218 144 54 20
409 Sorry, I have to make another call. 1.4312 0.04539 218 146 50 22
410 Yes, of course the boys are pitching in. 1.4312 0.04445 218 144 54 20
411 Hello!, I'd like to order a hot dog with mustard, a bag of peanuts, and a beer to Apartment 12 B! 1.4312 0.04201 218 139 64 15
412 Now that he’s working from home, I realized why he only talks about his job in sports metaphors. 1.4312 0.04251 218 140 62 16
413 Quarantine Day 68: "Hundredth and ninth inning, I think." 1.4312 0.04349 218 142 58 18
414 Welcome to the MLB..... Major Living-Room Baseball! 1.4312 0.04300 218 141 60 17
415 He's working on his inside fastball. 1.4312 0.04251 218 140 62 16
416 We are in the second inning of the pandemic. 1.4312 0.04445 218 144 54 20
417 Right now there's a man on the recliner who's about to steal the sofa. 1.4299 0.04095 214 134 68 12
418 I know it’s only the 3rd inning, but I need a lefty. Wake Bobby from his nap. 1.4299 0.04258 221 143 61 17
419 It's great to touch base with you too. 1.4299 0.04306 221 144 59 18
420 I never thought I’d say I missed watching baseball on TV either Carol, but here we are. 1.4292 0.04333 219 143 58 18
421 The 3rd basemen is literally phoning it in... 1.4286 0.04412 210 137 56 17
422 I’d like to report a hit and run. 1.4286 0.04312 217 141 59 17
423 The cat’s on standby for when the ball rolls under the couch 1.4279 0.04388 208 135 57 16
424 Definitely going to be a rebuilding year. 1.4279 0.04281 208 133 61 14
425 Yes, mother. We had the bat tested for coronavirus. 1.4279 0.04441 208 136 55 17
426 Yeah, the new apartment’s okay except for all the flies. 1.4272 0.04159 213 135 65 13
427 We're doing okay. The boys finally finished all the jigsaw puzzles. 1.4272 0.04565 213 143 49 21
428 Remember that fan experience I won recently? 1.4272 0.04212 213 136 63 14
429 Yes, honey, I am watching live sports. 1.4272 0.04265 213 137 61 15
430 That's one chili dog, one beer...and do you have cat treats? 1.4272 0.04316 213 138 59 16
431 The owners box is a little too close for my liking 1.4265 0.04131 211 133 66 12
432 I never thought I’d say this Susan, but I NEED sports to come back. Bob is bringing a whole new meaning to the term ‘home base’. 1.4265 0.04396 211 138 56 17
433 This marriage is in the ninth inning. 1.4265 0.04447 211 139 54 18
434 I'm not concerned. He can't hit an inside pitch. 1.4265 0.04497 211 140 52 19
435 He used to take me OUT to the ballgame... 1.4265 0.04447 211 139 54 18
436 I'm not sure I would call it LIVE sports 1.4265 0.04447 211 139 54 18
437 Some of us are following the stay-at-home order better than others. 1.4265 0.04185 211 134 64 13
438 Hello, third floor league? We on the sixth floor want to trade our left fielder for your shortstop. We'll throw in our couch as a bonus. It makes a great third base. 1.4258 0.04424 209 137 55 17
439 Trust me—home field is no advantage. 1.4252 0.04691 214 147 43 24
440 He’s not getting to first base...or any base...because he can’t even leave home. 1.4251 0.04558 207 138 50 19
441 Then he asked me, 'Why do ya think they call it a throw rug?' 1.4251 0.04808 207 143 40 24
442 God, I wish we could stop playing the home team! 1.4245 0.03922 212 138 61 13
443 : “And the crowd... She goes wild! 1.4245 0.04579 212 143 48 21
444 It's a home game 1.4245 0.04223 212 136 62 14
445 Sorry, we've got a home game. 1.4245 0.04223 212 136 62 14
446 These fantasy leagues have gotten out of hand. 1.4245 0.04276 212 137 60 15
447 Remember the raffle at the mall last month for a Yankees home game? 1.4245 0.04530 212 142 50 20
448 I finally understand the infield fly rule 1.4245 0.04328 212 138 58 16
449 I only took 1 of the hydroxychloroquine tablets. Why do you ask? 1.4244 0.04641 205 138 47 20
450 I guess you’d call it home entertainment. 1.4231 0.04277 208 134 60 14
451 In an effort to salvage the 2020 season, MLB has partnered with Door Dash... 1.4231 0.04331 208 135 58 15
452 Nachos and a Corona Light, please. 1.4229 0.04600 201 134 49 18
453 It's a home run every time. 1.4223 0.04413 206 135 55 16
454 Hold on a sec, Mom.."Hey, batter, batter SWING batter, batter..." 1.4223 0.04623 206 139 47 20
455 Mariah Carey says she'll sing the National Anthem after she's done home-schooling. 1.4216 0.04388 204 133 56 15
456 Gotta go Hon. I’m at the bottom of my fifth. 1.4216 0.04497 204 135 52 17
457 Now aim for Aunt Mildred's vase. I've always hated it. 1.4216 0.04603 204 137 48 19
458 If our pitching holds up I think we can stay out of the cellar this season. 1.4216 0.04388 204 133 56 15
459 I said you can throw the ball, not you may throw the ball. Didn't you learn anything in my home grammar lessons?! 1.4208 0.04582 202 135 49 18
460 Not much. Bob's playing softball in the living room with friends from work. 0-0, top of the 9th with two broken lamps. 1.4208 0.04688 202 137 45 20
461 Don't you people know what "Take me out to the ball game" means? 1.4205 0.04585 195 129 50 16
462 Not an entry. I'm just curious to know if this was drawn before or after the virus. Today, it hardly seems to need a caption. 1.4195 0.04937 205 145 34 26
463 I'm really dreading deer season. 1.4179 0.04316 201 130 58 13
464 Oh, Mom—did I tell you we got a cat? 1.4179 0.04702 201 137 44 20
465 He’s alright, but I’m not sure he's in my league. 1.4175 0.04713 194 131 45 18
466 Yes, Jim has been staying active. He's actually repairing the windows next week. 1.4175 0.04656 194 130 47 17
467 I'm serious, he's about to hit a stay-at-homer. 1.4175 0.04599 194 129 49 16
468 NO, It's take me OUT to the ball game! 1.4175 0.04042 194 120 67 7
469 Yeah, the relationship is going pretty well. He said he wants to go to third base tonigh 1.4171 0.04226 199 127 61 11
470 I don't mind them playing in the house. It's all the spitting and crotch-scratching that really bothers me. 1.4171 0.04682 199 135 45 19
471 The upside of quarantine is a home field advantage 1.4162 0.04605 197 132 48 17
472 I should've quarentined with my mother... 1.4162 0.04824 197 136 40 21
473 Mom, get your guy ready in left. Jake, keep the runner close to second until you're sure its gonna drop. Tell Chris and Pat to take themselves off mute if they want to be fan noise. OK, we're ready. 1.4162 0.04491 197 130 52 15
474 Grubhub? Can you do peanuts and crackerjack? 1.4162 0.03938 197 121 70 6
475 Yeah, Rick still doesn’t know what ‘getting to first base’ means 1.4150 0.04663 200 136 45 19
476 This work from home thing is going a little too far 1.4150 0.04499 200 133 51 16
477 Three coughs and you’re out. 1.4150 0.04386 200 136 47 17
478 Frank, your mother says to look out for the splitter 1.4150 0.04443 200 132 53 15
479 About halfway through the 500-piece jigsaw puzzle, one of them had an idea. 1.4150 0.04554 200 134 49 17
480 Ok, ok! It's a hoax! There, I said it. Just go out to the park and play already 1.4150 0.04663 200 136 45 19
481 It’s a little inside baseball.” 1.4150 0.04328 200 130 57 13
482 Ok, I can do without the peanuts and cracker jacks, but where’s my damn wine? 1.4149 0.04699 188 126 46 16
483 Covid. 19,Yankees 20..... 1.4149 0.04819 188 128 42 18
484 Every hit will be a home run, I guess 1.4145 0.04728 193 131 44 18
485 It's bottom of the ninth week in quarantine. 1.4127 0.04680 189 127 46 16
486 He finally splurged on a diamond." 1.4127 0.04369 189 122 56 11
487 The brochure said "enjoy live sports from the comfort of your living room". I guess I just assumed they meant on television 1.4127 0.04558 189 125 50 14
488 I'll have him call as soon as he gets home. 1.4125 0.04640 160 102 50 8
489 Bunt, Jerry. I’m talking to Gladys and I’m not hanging up to call 9-1-1. 1.4124 0.04355 194 126 56 12
490 Hi, is this the number for window repairs? 1.4124 0.04765 194 133 42 19
491 At least the catcher is wearing a mask 1.4118 0.04894 187 129 39 19
492 I don't mind the broken windows so much as their spitting on the carpeting. 1.4118 0.04653 187 125 47 15
493 He's still trying to get to second base, but we're already home. I wish he'd follow me upstairs so we could both score. 1.4118 0.04714 187 126 45 16
494 Next one out sets the table! 1.4118 0.04653 187 125 47 15
495 It's interesting to us, but to everyone else it's just inside baseball . 1.4118 0.04590 187 124 49 14
496 Life’s a pitch. 1.4115 0.04857 192 133 39 20
497 This isn’t the only strikeout he’ll have tonight. 1.4115 0.04743 192 131 43 18
498 I should have known better when he said he was bringing home a diamond . 1.4115 0.04685 192 130 45 17
499 If the lamp flickers, it's a fastball. If I move the pillow, it's a curve. 1.4115 0.04322 192 124 57 11
500 Hello. I’d like to replace my window and my husband. 1.4105 0.04539 190 126 50 14
501 I thought he asked me over for a date, but I think I'm going to strike out. 1.4105 0.04660 190 128 46 16
502 Let's just say he won't be getting to first base tonight. 1.4105 0.04600 190 127 48 15
503 I know what I said months back, but you know, this does feel normal now. 1.4105 0.04600 190 127 48 15
504 I really miss those away games 1.4105 0.04600 190 127 48 15
505 You’ll never guess who got to third base last night. 1.4105 0.04893 190 132 38 20
506 Sorry I can’t make it, my son’s baseball team has a home game tonight 1.4105 0.04414 190 124 54 12
507 Bottom of the ninth and I’m loaded. 1.4105 0.04719 190 129 44 17
508 The cat wants to see you throw your hairball. 1.4105 0.04893 190 132 38 20
509 I asked him for a glass of water, not a pitcher. 1.4105 0.04719 190 129 44 17
510 No, nothing going on here. 3-2 count, 2 outs and the world's about to end. 1.4105 0.04600 190 127 48 15
511 It's the bottom of the fifth but we've still got two bottles left. 1.4105 0.04600 190 127 48 15
512 Honey, this isn't want I thought you meant when you asked to quit your job and strike-out on your own 1.4105 0.04778 190 130 42 18
513 Yeah, Jen, how's your league going? In our building, 3A is currently leading the series. . 1.4093 0.03979 193 125 59 9
514 I could explain, but it's a lot of inside baseball. 1.4093 0.04428 193 127 53 13
515 I could never afford a front-row seat until I sheltered in place! 1.4093 0.04548 193 129 49 15
516 That’s not all. There’s a guy in the dining room spitting sunflower seeds. 1.4093 0.04489 193 128 51 14
517 You'll never guess who's on first! 1.4093 0.04489 193 128 51 14
518 Enough with the first base jokes, just tell me how to get them out of here. 1.4093 0.04548 193 129 49 15
519 Mom says one more vase hit and it’s game over! 1.4093 0.04548 193 129 49 15
520 Right Yogi, if the people don’t want to come out to the ballpark, nobody’s going to stop them. 1.4093 0.04723 193 132 43 18
521 Only the catcher's wearing one. 1.4093 0.04607 193 130 47 16
522 Bottom of the ninth, couches loaded. 1.4093 0.04489 193 128 51 14
523 The Mets are finally out of the basement! 1.4086 0.04790 186 127 42 17
524 The bases aren’t the only thing loaded in this house. 1.4086 0.04790 186 127 42 17
525 Well, I'm not exactly at home. More like third base. 1.4086 0.04604 186 124 48 14
526 I just won't touch their balls. 1.4086 0.04850 186 128 40 18
527 Fortunately they call the game after 750 innings. 1.4086 0.04910 186 129 38 19
528 Lemme tell you, Marcie--when they say "battery included," read the fine print. 1.4056 0.04707 180 121 45 14
529 I think it’s the White Sox versus the Dirty Socks 1.4045 0.04875 178 122 40 16
530 I’m really hoping for a no-hitter 1.4045 0.04607 178 118 48 12
531 I'm telling you, you've got to check out my new 12k TV. It's like the players are in my living room. 1.4045 0.04809 178 121 42 15
532 Having him work from home is starting to get old... 1.4045 0.04676 178 119 46 13
533 ... a hot dog with everything, 2 pretzels with extra mustard, and a team face mask. The tip's under the doormat. 1.4045 0.04676 178 119 46 13
534 He's trying to hit the ball out of the parlour 1.4045 0.04173 178 122 44 12
535 Yes, I’d like to cancel the sports package. 1.4045 0.04676 178 119 46 13
536 I gotta go. The season's home opener is finally starting. 1.4045 0.04467 178 116 52 10
537 Yeah, I guess you could say he’s a bit high and inside. 1.4044 0.04903 183 127 38 18
538 Hope I get to third base tonight 1.4044 0.04386 183 119 54 10
539 Who’s on third? 1.4044 0.04716 183 124 44 15
540 Most of them are 6-feet apart, but the catcher's the only one wearing a mask, the rest all have gloves on, good thing it's a home game!" 1.4044 0.04521 183 121 50 12
541 Who's winning? Well...nobody. 1.4044 0.04842 183 126 40 17
542 I said no spitting! 1.4044 0.04903 183 127 38 18
543 I'm just praying for a no-hitter! 1.4044 0.04587 183 122 48 13
544 Can I call you back? Bases are loaded and it's a full count. 1.4044 0.04903 183 127 38 18
545 I hate it, but it is better than the monster trucks they started out with 1.4044 0.04779 183 125 42 16
546 Again, this isn't Who ... I Don't Know ... No he's on second ... I said before, you're not speaking to Who ... 1.4044 0.04779 183 125 42 16
547 Terrible circumstances but these seats are amazing 1.4033 0.04687 181 122 45 14
548 The cat is out of the box. 1.4033 0.04687 181 122 45 14
549 No. I"m gonna stay home and watch the game. 1.4033 0.04621 181 121 47 13
550 Don’t worry. The cat is not getting on the furniture. 1.4033 0.04687 181 122 45 14
551 We need a ruling on the ball landing in the chicken salad. I say fowl. 1.4033 0.04621 181 121 47 13
552 I told him he was gonna make it to third base tonight if he was lucky. I don’t think this is what I meant. 1.4022 0.04853 179 123 40 16
553 I'll have to call you back, my husband brought work home with him again. 1.4022 0.04788 179 122 42 15
554 Hi Alice. They put me at 3rd base today! 1.4022 0.04448 179 117 52 10
555 Well, he never hit one when he was outdoors, so I'm really not worried. 1.4022 0.04917 179 124 38 17
556 Can I call you back? Got a situation here I need to referee. 1.4022 0.04788 179 122 42 15
557 In that case, how likely is a vaccine before hockey season? 1.4022 0.04917 179 124 38 17
558 For the first time in months, he’s out 1.4000 0.04512 175 115 50 10
559 Left hand with phone means bunt. 1.4000 0.04600 170 112 48 10
560 Hi, yes.... are any Divorce Lawyers working remotely? 1.4000 0.04863 175 120 40 15
561 I’m counting my lucky stars hockey season is over. 1.4000 0.04675 170 113 46 11
562 Not much, just playing a few games 1.4000 0.04446 170 115 44 11
563 I've got to go. I'm on deck. 1.4000 0.04585 175 116 48 11
564 Well, it was this or NASCAR. 1.4000 0.04585 175 116 48 11
565 The only home-field advantage I can see it that our bullpen is next to the fridge. 1.4000 0.04749 170 114 44 12
566 He will definitely be late. He hasn't even left home yet. 1.3989 0.04531 178 118 49 11
567 I keep tellin' em there's no flattening the curve in baseball! 1.3989 0.04997 178 125 35 18
568 Get Mom warmed up...Because Dad's spent...Did you look upstairs? How far can she have gone? 1.3989 0.04869 178 123 39 16
569 Yes, Mom, I'm still playing the field. 1.3989 0.04736 178 121 43 14
570 She tends to favor the pitchers on the inside corner. But for a saucer of cream, she'll call whatever you want 1.3988 0.04969 173 120 37 16
571 Bottom of the 205th 1.3977 0.04840 176 121 40 15
572 Staying in for the ball game,keeping away from the crowds. Ordered some peanuts and cracker jacks, amazon said theres a shortage on snacks. So we'll root root root for the home team,they're playing in our living room-its just 1,2,3,strikes you're out but it's so much better than Zoom.(to the tune of "take me out to the ball game") 1.3977 0.04973 176 123 36 17
573 Football is in the dining room 1.3977 0.04635 176 118 46 12
574 Honey, when I said I wanted to try more "games" in the bedroom, this isn't what I had in mind. 1.3977 0.04704 176 119 44 13
575 There's a home game today. 1.3977 0.04704 176 119 44 13
576 Their home record is astonishing. But I still prefer the away games." 1.3977 0.04492 176 116 50 10
577 Oh, you know, he is trying to get to third base again tonight. 1.3966 0.04878 174 120 39 15
578 This isn’t what I expected when I bought 2020 season tickets 1.3966 0.05079 174 123 33 18
579 Yes Carol! You can rent them for 7-9 innings or by the hour. 1.3966 0.04670 174 117 45 12
580 This swingers party isn’t quite what I expected. 1.3966 0.04810 174 119 41 14
581 It's worse than that, Mildred...I'm quarantined with the Mets! 1.3966 0.05013 174 122 35 17
582 Not Much. Just sheltering in place. You? 1.3966 0.04451 174 114 51 9
583 That's two hot dogs, a large beer and a salted pretzel for delivery. 1.3966 0.04525 174 115 49 10
584 Technically, every hit's a home run. 1.3966 0.04451 174 114 51 9
585 I gotta go, Mom. Doug’s hit a new level of desperation for sports, and I’ve already been to the ER twice this week. 1.3964 0.04837 169 115 41 13
586 This isn’t what I meant when I asked if you wanted to get to first base tonight 1.3964 0.05120 169 119 33 17
587 I told them I'd play third base couch. 1.3964 0.04764 169 114 43 12
588 Re-enacting Moneyball is bad enough, but I’m really worried for Fight Club. 1.3964 0.04764 169 114 43 12
589 I love my new Chesterfield of dreams. 1.3964 0.04981 169 117 37 15
590 It's okay. The pitcher is six feet from the battery and the catcher in wearing a mask. 1.3964 0.04689 169 113 45 11
591 I don't know about you, but I thought he was safe at home. 1.3964 0.04689 169 113 45 11
592 Two strikes, two outs, house is loaded. 1.3964 0.04689 169 113 45 11
593 Of course I’m calling the Commissioner! If they don’t allow spitballs in the majors, why would I allow it in my living room? 1.3964 0.04764 169 114 43 12
594 What do you mean you stop serving beer after the 7th inning?!? 1.3964 0.05051 169 118 35 16
595 Dinner? The usual - peanuts and Cracker Jack. 1.3964 0.04614 169 112 47 10
596 Bottom of the third, no outs. How's it going there? 1.3964 0.04689 169 113 45 11
597 Still tied; three windows to go. 1.3964 0.04614 169 112 47 10
598 Your father can't come to the phone right now. He's stealing signs from the guest bedroom. 1.3964 0.04837 169 115 41 13
599 We have a developing situation here. I'll have to call you back during the 7th inning stretch. 1.3964 0.04614 169 112 47 10
600 The boys of “...What season is this again 1.3964 0.04764 169 114 43 12
601 Sorry if I sound a little off base right now. 1.3964 0.04910 169 116 39 14
602 Hey honey, mind grabbing two cases of bud, 5 buckets of KFC, and a Dyson vacuum cleaner on the way home? 1.3964 0.04689 169 113 45 11
603 Same old, same old. You? 1.3964 0.04910 169 116 39 14
604 Nope! The catcher is the only one wearing a mask! 1.3964 0.04614 169 112 47 10
605 The best way to describe it is inside baseball. 1.3964 0.04837 169 115 41 13
606 Let's go boys- go big or go... oh 1.3964 0.04689 169 113 45 11
607 It's 1-1, bottom of the fifth, and the cat's on third. You 1.3964 0.04910 169 116 39 14
608 We’re high and inside 1.3964 0.04764 169 114 43 12
609 Sorry, I'm not allowed to leave. I'm the fan. 1.3964 0.04837 169 115 41 13
610 Uh... high and inside just isn’t working out. 1.3964 0.04764 169 114 43 12
611 I only took the recommended dose. 1.3955 0.04884 177 123 38 16
612 I’m prepared to negotiate as long as it takes. You want to play hardball? We can play hardball. 1.3955 0.04614 177 119 46 12
613 I drew the line at chewing tobacco. 1.3955 0.04544 177 118 48 11
614 Only winner here's gonna be the drywall repairman. 1.3955 0.04751 177 121 42 14
615 You were right. This is worse. 1.3955 0.04751 177 121 42 14
616 YEA, I FEEL SAFE...THERE'S LESS THAN 10 PEOPLE IN THE ROOM 1.3955 0.04544 177 118 48 11
617 Karl is still working from home, so I may need to run. 1.3955 0.04818 177 122 40 15
618 Remember boy, no sliding on my hardwood. 1.3955 0.04950 177 124 36 17
619 It may be my house but I’m still leaving after the 7th inning. 1.3955 0.04614 177 119 46 12
620 I’m not sure this is what they meant by “Stay home; stay safe.” 1.3955 0.04751 177 121 42 14
621 Thank God it's not hunting season. 1.3955 0.04751 177 121 42 14
622 And only the catcher's wearing a mask. 1.3955 0.04473 177 117 50 10
623 I had a quiet moment, so I thought I'd touch base 1.3955 0.04751 177 121 42 14
624 Enough of the inning, I want them outing. 1.3955 0.04818 177 122 40 15
625 Nothing new, really. What's new with you? 1.3953 0.04407 172 112 52 8
626 Use your indoor voices! 1.3953 0.04848 172 118 40 14
627 I called the stadium and asked for take-out 1.3953 0.04558 172 114 48 10
628 Honestly, I don't care if they never come back. 1.3953 0.04848 172 118 40 14
629 Basically, every hit is a home run. 1.3943 0.04577 175 117 47 11
630 Hold on one sec- I'm just about to tell you if I'd like to order a new pitcher, but this time of margaritas. 1.3943 0.04923 175 122 37 16
631 Thankfully, it’s a no-hitter. 1.3941 0.04592 170 113 47 10
632 Hi Scotty. It’s Mom. Be sure to watch Sportscenter tonight. Your Dad and Uncle Stan are going to be on. 1.3941 0.04886 170 117 39 14
633 They just couldn't play without a spectator. 1.3941 0.04592 170 113 47 10
634 Bonnie, you were right - no matter where you watch it, baseball will always be boring. 1.3941 0.04814 170 116 41 13
635 I wish they would go back to poker night. 1.3941 0.04592 170 113 47 10
636 And your Picasso is second base." 1.3941 0.04742 170 115 43 12
637 I can't talk now, Joe's acting like a screwball, Pete is batty an Paul is catching something. 1.3941 0.05230 170 122 29 19
638 Watching the game. What are you doing? 1.3941 0.04814 170 116 41 13
639 Thankfully, it looks like a no-hitter. 1.3941 0.04814 170 116 41 13
640 I used to love home games. 1.3941 0.04814 170 116 41 13
641 It's 3-2 in the 7th and the cat is doing a shit poor job of coaching 1.3929 0.05342 168 122 26 20
642 The rules are clear- a cat cannot cause a balk! 1.3926 0.05181 163 115 32 16
643 I suppose they are both the home team. 1.3918 0.04495 171 113 49 9
644 At least there’s no commercials. 1.3916 0.04663 166 111 45 10
645 The engagement is off. This wasn’t the kind of diamond I had in mind. 1.3916 0.04663 166 111 45 10
646 No, I’m not watching the game. 1.3905 0.04606 169 113 46 10
647 I'm just sayin' I thought "inside baseball" meant somethin' different 1.3905 0.04756 169 115 42 12
648 Believe me, there's no joy in Mudville tonight 1.3905 0.04756 169 115 42 12
649 On the up side, I've never had a better seat! 1.3902 0.04699 164 110 44 10
650 I knew there were some rules changes during the offseason, but I must have missed the one about home plate, 1.3892 0.04868 167 115 39 13
651 Well, Eileen, it’s really improved morale around the house. You know there’s no crying in baseball. 1.3892 0.04794 167 114 41 12
652 At first, it started with Monopoly, but now it’s gotten out of control. 1.3892 0.04718 167 113 43 11
653 Well, I don’t know who to root for. They both seem to be the home team. 1.3889 0.04973 162 112 37 13
654 If you're still at the store, buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack.. 1.3879 0.04516 165 109 48 8
655 I just wish he’d stop spitting on the carpet. 1.3879 0.05056 165 116 34 15
656 Houston, I have a problem 1.3879 0.05056 165 116 34 15
657 Hello, does our homeowners policy cover stolen bases? 1.3879 0.04832 165 113 40 12
658 Working from home has been a challenge, but Rose's husband works in sewage treatment so I can't complain. 1.3865 0.04948 163 113 37 13
659 Hello? TV repair? 1.3865 0.04948 163 113 37 13
660 Yes, I'm home. 1.3865 0.04871 163 112 39 12
661 They're playing at home today. 1.3865 0.04948 163 113 37 13
662 AAA Window Repair? I'd like to put you on retainer. 1.3865 0.04713 163 110 43 10
663 This really hits close to home. 1.3865 0.05024 163 114 35 14
664 Ohh, it’s home game tonight. 1.3861 0.05057 158 110 35 13
665 I dunno what stage of grief this is, but I'm pretty sure we're in the seventh inning of denial. 1.3861 0.05057 158 110 35 13
666 Shatter in place. 1.3861 0.05214 158 112 31 15
667 I need a new quaranteam 1.3861 0.05214 158 112 31 15
668 Get the lefty in 4D warmed up. Shaggy's out of gas. 1.3861 0.05367 158 114 27 17
669 Hi Mom...tied in the bottom of the ninth, last batter up, with runners at the rubber tree plant and the Roomba...pretty exciting! 1.3861 0.05367 158 114 27 17
670 It's the top of the seventh, can you drop the cracker jacks off before the seventh ending stretch? 1.3861 0.04554 158 104 47 7
671 Of course, we're social distancing. First and second are at Marcie's, short and third are at Bob's, and Carl has the outfield. 1.3861 0.04812 158 107 41 10
672 Next year, I'm picking out my own diamond. 1.3861 0.04812 158 107 41 10
673 The first couple of weeks, the boys were fine with puzzles and board games 1.3861 0.04977 158 109 37 12
674 I said take me OUT to the ballgame. 1.3855 0.04654 166 112 44 10
675 the cat is about to steal home base! 1.3855 0.05174 166 119 30 17
676 Already back in the swing of things over here. 1.3855 0.04654 166 112 44 10
677 His E.R.A is down, but his anti-bodies are up. 1.3855 0.04575 166 111 46 9
678 Yeah, the cable went out again. So, I just brought the game here. 1.3855 0.04884 166 115 38 13
679 No masks - no game! 1.3855 0.04575 166 111 46 9
680 Yeah, the WiFi's down again. 1.3855 0.04732 166 113 42 11
681 Tell your guys that when I bang on the garbage can, it means a curve is coming. 1.3855 0.05031 166 117 34 15
682 It’s the bottom of the ninth, the dishes are loaded but the bases are empty. 1.3851 0.04911 161 111 38 12
683 It was this or ice hockey in the bathroom. 1.3851 0.04911 161 111 38 12
684 He's looking in for the sign. But, in life, aren't we all looking for a sign. 1.3851 0.04989 161 112 36 13
685 Quarantine at my house? Well, we've finished all the puzzles... 1.3851 0.04989 161 112 36 13
686 The one I really feel sorry for is the right fielder. He's in the pantry with my cupcakes. 1.3851 0.04831 161 110 40 11
687 Today is bad enough, but tomorrow is hockey. 1.3851 0.04989 161 112 36 13
688 My neighbor just banged on his trash can, so I’m guessing curveball. 1.3851 0.04831 161 110 40 11
689 I gotta go make pancakes....the batter's up. 1.3851 0.04989 161 112 36 13
690 Because I’m rich, Karen. 1.3836 0.05263 159 114 29 16
691 We were bored with jigsaw puzzles and board games, so we decided to try something different tonight. 1.3836 0.04952 159 110 37 12
692 They’re gonna pitch him outside; last time up, he hit it through the roof! 1.3836 0.04871 159 109 39 11
693 Maude? I’m gonna have to call you back. Yeah, I’m on deck 1.3836 0.04619 159 106 45 8
694 Wadsworth, when I said bring me a pitcher, this isn't what I meant. 1.3836 0.04871 159 109 39 11
695 Come on over and we can do the Wave. 1.3836 0.04871 159 109 39 11
696 Yeah, they’re really high and still inside . 1.3836 0.05413 159 116 25 18
697 Just get it over the plate so we can eat. 1.3836 0.04871 159 109 39 11
698 Perhaps, in this case, six-feet is still too close. 1.3836 0.04871 159 109 39 11
699 Psst Roger, try to flatten the curve. 1.3836 0.04871 159 109 39 11
700 We lost the T.V. in Game 4. 1.3836 0.04619 159 106 45 8
701 911? Yes, I'd like to report someone stealing home 1.3836 0.05031 159 111 35 13
702 We’re going to need a new pitcher. And window. Probably lamp soon too. 1.3836 0.05031 159 111 35 13
703 On the plus side, there are never any rain delays. 1.3827 0.04727 162 110 42 10
704 This isn't what I thought you meant when you said your team had home advantage. 1.3822 0.04911 157 108 38 11
705 So, then Fluffy gets all annoyed and starts calling pitches from BEHIND the couch. 1.3822 0.04993 157 109 36 12
706 Hit this one out of the house and we won't see it again until there's a vaccine. 1.3822 0.04993 157 109 36 12
707 The turnout isn't what we'd hoped for . . . 1.3806 0.04952 155 107 37 11
708 Hold on just a second will ya, Janey..."WE WANT A PITCHER, NOT A BELLY ITCHER"...All right, hon, I'm back. 1.3791 0.05246 153 109 30 14
709 And then they asked to use one of my good dishes as home plate! It's unbelievable! 1.3791 0.04995 153 106 36 11
710 Holding for Seinbrenner. Yea, tell him that I've found some of them. 1.3782 0.04927 156 108 37 11
711 You stink, I am your mother , I have the God given right to heckle you 1.3782 0.05172 156 111 31 14
712 I thought inside-baseball was a phrase. 1.3775 0.04768 151 102 41 8
713 We finished the puzzle so now we’re trying something else. 1.3775 0.04768 151 102 41 8
714 Yeah, it's fun having men as housemates, but unfortunately none of them ever get to first base. 1.3766 0.05218 154 110 30 14
715 Gina, I'm telling you, this new holographics sports app makes it feel like you're really there 1.3766 0.04882 154 106 38 10
716 You won't believe it, Dad. Opening Day and I've got a front row seat right along the third base line! 1.3766 0.04882 154 106 38 10
717 Oh, I'm not worried-he can't hit the curve ball. 1.3766 0.04794 154 105 40 9
718 This wasn’t what I had in mind with phase one opener. 1.3766 0.05053 154 108 34 12
719 Hold on a sec, I'm on deck. 1.3766 0.04614 154 103 44 7
720 Turns out it's a different kind of Swinger's Club. 1.3766 0.04882 154 106 38 10
721 I'm in a nosebleed seat. 1.3766 0.04968 154 107 36 11
722 You said you wanted live baseball 1.3766 0.04794 154 105 40 9
723 The next Nobel Prize should go to All Teachers! 1.3766 0.04968 154 107 36 11
724 As he wound up to pitch, Cletus was still fuming over the 'no spitting' rule... 1.3766 0.04968 154 107 36 11
725 Top of the 9th week 1.3758 0.04817 157 108 39 10
726 ill call you right back, im watching the game 1.3758 0.05224 157 113 29 15
727 Sorry Barb, I’ve gotta go. My imaginary friends are back — and they’re about to raid my stash of peanuts and crackerjacks. 1.3758 0.04984 157 110 35 12
728 You know, I have to root for the home team. 1.3758 0.04465 157 109 39 9
729 When they said 'Live sports straight into your living room!' they weren't exaggerating 1.3758 0.04901 157 109 37 11
730 One hotdog with mustard, one beer, peanuts and toilet paper please. 1.3758 0.05065 157 111 33 13
731 « I said board game not ball game! » 1.3758 0.04731 157 112 33 12
732 I said "Spring Cleaning", NOT Spring Training" 1.3758 0.04901 157 109 37 11
733 Yeah, they’re playing at home again today. 1.3758 0.04901 157 109 37 11
734 No, I'm pretty sure tonight's a home game. 1.3758 0.04556 157 105 45 7
735 I just hope things open up before football season. 1.3758 0.04901 157 109 37 11
736 I was against it, but they said it was only a spring training game. 1.3758 0.05145 157 112 31 14
737 What happened to "take me OUT to the ballgame"? 1.3758 0.04901 157 109 37 11
738 Jerry, your mom says she’s rounding third. 1.3758 0.04901 157 109 37 11
739 It's living room baseball until the stadiums open. 1.3758 0.03605 157 113 36 8
740 Yes. Hello. Do you deliver peanuts and Cracker Jacks?" 1.3758 0.04984 157 110 35 12
741 I gotta go. I have 50,000 fans' worth of cheering to do. 1.3758 0.04984 157 110 35 12
742 I thought I said take me OUT to the ball game! 1.3750 0.04743 152 103 41 8
743 At least we have SOME sense of normalcy 1.3750 0.05011 152 106 35 11
744 The outfielders are with the neighbors. 1.3750 0.05182 152 108 31 13
745 de Blasio, I think it's time to reopen the parks... 1.3750 0.04834 152 104 39 9
746 Not being televised. It's a home game. 1.3750 0.05011 152 106 35 11
747 Do you do annulments over video chat? 1.3750 0.05011 152 106 35 11
748 Quarantining with the family, week 10 1.3750 0.05347 152 110 27 15
749 I have to go -- the count is 3-2. 1.3750 0.04049 152 106 39 7
750 Yes, Mom, I’ll let you know when he’s safe at home. 1.3750 0.05011 152 106 35 11
751 Yep , One of the Astros is definitely in the foyer trying to steal the signs . 1.3742 0.04942 155 108 36 11
752 This gives a new meaning to the 'home team'" 1.3742 0.05026 155 109 34 12
753 Harold has taken his fantasy baseball club to a new level. 1.3742 0.05026 155 109 34 12
754 When the ad said this new surround sound system brings the game to your living room, they weren't kidding. 1.3742 0.04769 155 106 40 9
755 Its bottom of her patience 1.3742 0.05109 155 110 32 13
756 This game could not be any closer. 1.3742 0.05109 155 110 32 13
757 I’d like to order peanuts and Cracker Jack, and a window for the wall out back 1.3741 0.04847 147 100 39 8
758 Honestly the fact that I can’t genuinely sing Take Me Out to the Ballgame anymore ruins it for me. 1.3741 0.05036 147 102 35 10
759 Isn’t the pitcher supposed to be more than 6 feet away? 1.3741 0.05036 147 102 35 10
760 This team sucks. 1.3741 0.04286 147 107 30 10
761 Watch the bunt! 1.3741 0.04750 147 99 41 7
762 Their excuse is that they're just trying to be "safe at home." 1.3741 0.04942 147 101 37 9
763 Yes, I know it's been a couple of years, do you have any idea when you'll be able to get out to pick up Sam and Erik? 1.3741 0.05127 147 103 33 11
764 Unfortunately the boys can't come out to play, Mrs Johnson. 1.3741 0.05036 147 102 35 10
765 Honey...stop banging the trash can. I can see you from the living room. 1.3741 0.04750 147 99 41 7
766 Yeah, that’s right, and they’re letting me sit in the dugout ! 1.3741 0.05036 147 102 35 10
767 No, he didn't hit it TO China, he hit THE china 1.3741 0.05036 147 102 35 10
768 Kitty, seeing they were using her bowl in the game, prepares to steal first base... 1.3741 0.05217 147 104 31 12
769 I don’t care if I never get back. 1.3741 0.04942 147 101 37 9
770 The pitcher looked in for a sign. A flattened curve? 1.3740 0.05340 123 84 32 7
771 Gotta go, Todd's about to throw a slider. 1.3734 0.04351 158 109 41 8
772 I'll have to call you back, I'm involved in a game of hard ball here. 1.3734 0.04792 158 109 39 10
773 It’s the bottom of the ninth, bases are loaded. And so am I. 1.3734 0.04876 158 110 37 11
774 So good, it's like it's right there in your living room 1.3734 0.04707 158 108 41 9
775 Nothing much. Same old. 1.3733 0.05054 150 105 34 11
776 Me? Managing 3rd base. 1.3733 0.04874 150 103 38 9
777 Bottom of the 8th and yes, of course they sang ‘Sweet Caroline. 1.3733 0.05142 150 106 32 12
778 Kevin Costner returns in the 2020 pandemic remake “Living Room of Dreams” 1.3733 0.05054 150 105 34 11
779 « well so I signed up for zoom plus... » 1.3733 0.05142 150 106 32 12
780 We’re not playing in the house, honey. It’s Phys. Ed. period. 1.3733 0.04781 150 102 40 8
781 Just watching sports. How about you? 1.3733 0.05054 150 105 34 11
782 Are you sure they’re not essential workers? 1.3733 0.05313 150 108 28 14
783 “I won’t be able to save these seats much longer.” 1.3733 0.05054 150 105 34 11
784 As far as I can tell, fair is foul and foul is fair. 1.3733 0.04828 150 105 35 10
785 I told him to bunt in this game, and he can try to hit a home run with me later”. 1.3733 0.05142 150 106 32 12
786 I'm looking for help on ground rule doubles in a two-and-a-half bathroom. Yes, I assure you there will be fan interference. 1.3733 0.05142 150 106 32 12
787 Oh, nothing. Just watching another home game. 1.3733 0.05142 150 106 32 12
788 I can't wait for the Away games 1.3733 0.04965 150 104 36 10
789 Hi MOM. Yup everything’s fine. Geoff is just playing baseball with the kids. 1.3733 0.04965 150 104 36 10
790 So far, three windows, two lamps, and the dog. The only curve that’s flattened here is George’s curveball.” 1.3733 0.05142 150 106 32 12
791 I don't think THIS was what the governor meant by ' stay home and find something you like to do 1.3733 0.05054 150 105 34 11
792 Okay, less than six feet, but he IS wearing a mask. 1.3733 0.04781 150 102 40 8
793 Hi, I'd like to cancel the Premium Sports Package. 1.3733 0.04874 150 103 38 9
794 I'm serious, Sharon. It feels like you're really there. 1.3733 0.04965 150 104 36 10
795 Apparently, I've been making bad calls all day.” 1.3733 0.05054 150 105 34 11
796 Hello, I'd like to speak to Ken Burns. 1.3733 0.05142 150 106 32 12
797 I told him that diamonds are a girl’s best friend, and he just took that and ran. 1.3733 0.04874 150 103 38 9
798 They told me they were bringing a bundt. 1.3733 0.05054 150 105 34 11
799 This isn’t what they meant by “inside baseball” 1.3716 0.05008 148 103 35 10
800 Well, the catcher's the only one wearing a mask, but at least they all have gloves on. 1.3716 0.04915 148 102 37 9
801 I'll call you back after my meeting ― the new guy's about to pitch 1.3716 0.04626 148 99 43 6
802 Home plate doesn't mean my best china. 1.3716 0.05188 148 105 31 12
803 Home game. Why do you ask? 1.3716 0.04724 148 100 41 7
804 I'm calling to report a possible hit and run. And a battery. 1.3716 0.04915 148 102 37 9
805 I’m telling you Sally, how lucky you are that your husband works in finance right now 1.3699 0.05052 146 102 34 10
806 . "I don't know yet, if Greg strikes out he's the one going to the supermarket". 1.3699 0.04663 146 98 42 6
807 They’re reenacting Game 5 Mets/Orioles 1969 World Series; bottom eighth inning, tie score, Cleon Jones up. 1.3699 0.04957 146 101 36 9
808 No, Honey, it's not what I pictured when you said the guys were coming over for the big game. 1.3699 0.04957 146 101 36 9
809 I'm fine with it as long as they don't start spitting. 1.3699 0.04763 146 99 40 7
810 Walk him and pitch to the delivery boy 1.3681 0.04700 144 97 41 6
811 So about grandpa’s urn... 1.3681 0.05097 144 101 33 10
812 The resolution is so good there are tobacco juice stains on the carpet. 1.3681 0.04903 144 99 37 8
813 Gotta go. It's the bottom of the ninth and I'm on third. 1.3681 0.05001 144 100 35 9
814 Nope, it is still boring. 1.3669 0.05221 139 98 31 10
815 The hardest part is getting the peanut shells out of the carpeting. 1.3662 0.05045 142 99 34 9
816 Hi. I have a question about our insurance policy. 1.3657 0.05140 134 93 33 8
817 I gotta go. I’m sitting on third base. 1.3655 0.05068 145 102 33 10
818 Yeah, the cat is getting used to it. 1.3655 0.04973 145 101 35 9
819 Take me OUT to the ballgame had a better ring to it 1.3655 0.05068 145 102 33 10
820 Can I call you back? I'm on third. 1.3655 0.04973 145 101 35 9
821 I’m playing, mom. I’m stealing the signs. 1.3655 0.04875 145 100 37 8
822 I can deal with the broken glass, but the tobacco spit is disgusting. 1.3655 0.05068 145 102 33 10
823 Let me call you back, bases are loaded and there might be a squeeze play at home. 1.3655 0.04776 145 99 39 7
824 Getting to first base is figurative 1.3655 0.05433 145 106 25 14
825 Our cable is down, so I’m watching the game live. 1.3655 0.04675 145 98 41 6
826 How're you doing? We're up to 14: 12 windows and 2 sculptures. 1.3655 0.04973 145 101 35 9
827 this is the first time i’ve gotten to third base on the couch 1.3643 0.05572 140 103 23 14
828 Actually, I DO care whether they never get back. 1.3643 0.05190 140 99 31 10
829 My husband is currently working from home plate. 1.3643 0.05190 140 99 31 10
830 « White House secretary, can I help you? » 1.3636 0.05394 143 104 26 13
831 What a year to have front row seats 1.3636 0.04816 143 98 38 7
832 Not much, just watching a game 1.3636 0.05302 143 103 28 12
833 No, it's ok, Sheila, I can talk. I got the game on pause. 1.3636 0.05113 143 101 32 10
834 Jon, get home fast, these guys just broke in to steal home!!! 1.3636 0.05209 143 102 30 11
835 I’ll have him call you when he rounds home. 1.3636 0.04816 143 98 38 7
836 I can't stay on much longer, I 'm on deck after the cat. 1.3636 0.04917 143 99 36 8
837 I still think that the catcher should not be the only one with a mask on. 1.3636 0.05209 143 102 30 11
838 You know how it is with the quarantine: A home game really is a home game. 1.3630 0.04945 146 102 35 9
839 Well our sports are back. We have baseball in the living room, soccer in the hallway, and football in the garage. 1.3630 0.04848 146 101 37 8
840 Yeah we’re both still working from home. 1.3623 0.05137 138 97 32 9
841 Well, my husband *did* say he was getting me a diamond. 1.3623 0.05033 138 96 34 8
842 No, mother, he's wearing a mask. 1.3623 0.05137 138 97 32 9
843 Oh, just watchin' the ball game. You? 1.3623 0.05033 138 96 34 8
844 Yes, mom we're all staying inside and just playing games. Yes, bored games. 1.3623 0.04818 138 94 38 6
845 The AirBnB listing didn’t say anything about baseball. 1.3617 0.05160 141 100 31 10
846 Doctor, I’ve got a major league headache. 1.3617 0.05539 141 104 23 14
847 I'm at the MLB home opener 1.3617 0.05061 141 99 33 9
848 Well I've got these life-size baseball player cutouts so I'm not *that* alone. How're you holding up? 1.3617 0.05352 141 102 27 12
849 Yeah I’m seeing ballplayers, is that a symptom? 1.3617 0.05061 141 99 33 9
850 I miss the commercials. 1.3617 0.05160 141 100 31 10
851 The date's going great. I just got to third base. 1.3617 0.05160 141 100 31 10
852 My fantasy team just stole home. 1.3617 0.05446 141 103 25 13
853 They claim they have a Constitutional right to play baseball. 1.3617 0.05352 141 102 27 12
854 Yes a hot dog with mustard and a Diet Coke Please ring when you arrive 1.3617 0.04959 141 98 35 8
855 It's ok. It's less than five people. 1.3617 0.05352 141 102 27 12
856 I guess this counts as family game night. 1.3617 0.05061 141 99 33 9
857 I told you I would do anything to watch baseball again ⚾️ 1.3617 0.05160 141 100 31 10
858 Yeah it’s not a day at the park here either 1.3617 0.05257 141 101 29 11
859 Yeah, I bought both teams. What’s the fun of being the 1%, if you can’t have the best seats during the season? 1.3617 0.05257 141 101 29 11
860 Perhaps we need to install a net in front of the sofa... 1.3617 0.05257 141 101 29 11
861 Good news is, I have the best seat in the house. Bad news is, home plate is my fine china. 1.3617 0.04959 141 98 35 8
862 Send in a lefty from the kitchen. We can't afford to lose another home game. 1.3617 0.04643 141 100 33 8
863 Those virtual reality pills work great! 1.3617 0.04959 141 98 35 8
864 Oh, you heard me all right, Helen... count's three and one and Dave's about to ground into an inning-ending double play... I know, pathetic. 1.3617 0.05352 141 102 27 12
865 It's a shutin. 1.3617 0.05257 141 101 29 11
866 No, I'm stealing signs. 1.3617 0.05160 141 100 31 10
867 I skipped Spring cleaning and went right to Spring training. 1.3617 0.05257 141 101 29 11
868 Yes, but I DO care if I never get back. 1.3617 0.05061 141 99 33 9
869 No, nothing surprises me anymore. I don’t even bat an eye. 1.3611 0.05179 144 103 30 11
870 We’re all playing inside baseball. 1.3611 0.05084 144 102 32 10
871 It’s top of the 8th, Dad is catching, boyfriend is batting, he’s 2 for2 today and brother is pitching. Another beautiful day in Quarantine Park 1.3611 0.05271 144 104 28 12
872 I think it's time for a change up. 1.3611 0.04308 144 102 35 7
873 I thought I was safe at home. 1.3611 0.04889 144 100 36 8
874 I feel like this is coming from left field. 1.3611 0.04987 144 101 34 9
875 I'm on deck, can I call you later? 1.3611 0.05179 144 103 30 11
876 The home game became contentious when Fluffy was caught stealing signals 1.3611 0.05179 144 103 30 11
877 Nothing much. Just sitting around watching the game. 1.3611 0.05179 144 103 30 11
878 It was either this or letting them 'skydive' from the top of the staircase 1.3609 0.05266 133 94 30 9
879 Juuuust a bit inside. 1.3603 0.04745 136 92 39 5
880 I get the feeling he wants me to stop hosting the knitting club. 1.3603 0.05490 136 99 25 12
881 Walk him... Please, please walk him. 1.3603 0.05078 136 95 33 8
882 I'm hoping for a no-hitter. 1.3603 0.05184 136 96 31 9
883 He keeps pitching him inside. 1.3603 0.04859 136 93 37 6
884 I got Peanuts and Cracker Jacks all over the floor and if they sing 'Take Me Out To the Ball Game' one more time, I will scream! 1.3603 0.05078 136 95 33 8
885 It's fine, but I don't think I'll stay for the whole game. 1.3597 0.05106 139 98 32 9
886 Yeah, I got season tickets to all home games! 1.3597 0.05404 139 101 26 12
887 Gotta go. I’m in charge of the Seventh-Inning Stretch Snacks. 1.3597 0.05003 139 97 34 8
888 I’ve got the perfect seat for the 7th inning stretch 1.3597 0.04898 139 96 36 7
889 One, two, three strikes, you're outta my house! 1.3597 0.05306 139 100 28 11
890 You were right, Doc. The walks have helped. 1.3597 0.05306 139 100 28 11
891 It could be worse. The Jets play in 7-B. 1.3597 0.05106 139 98 32 9
892 Yes, he's at home. 1.3597 0.05207 139 99 30 10
893 No, I asked if you deliver peanuts and cracker jacks... 1.3597 0.05106 139 98 32 9
894 Yep, he said he just wanted to get to first base! 1.3597 0.05499 139 102 24 13
895 Yeah, I'm at home. 1.3597 0.04898 139 96 36 7
896 High and inside? No! Sober up and play OUTSIDE! 1.3597 0.05106 139 98 32 9
897 Yes, I'm ready to come back to the office 1.3597 0.04898 139 96 36 7
898 No, I'm not the umpire, the cat is" 1.3597 0.05404 139 101 26 12
899 Bring me some peanuts and crackerjacks. 1.3597 0.05106 139 98 32 9
900 If it's "just a pastime" then why don't you let them do it in YOUR living room?! 1.3597 0.05404 139 101 26 12
901 They are playing at home this week 1.3597 0.05106 139 98 32 9
902 I don't understand this game very well, Ethel. but I think I scored a seat on the 50-yard line. 1.3597 0.05207 139 99 30 10
903 Hello! When does our homeowners insurance policy expire? 1.3597 0.05404 139 101 26 12
904 Now, you and I both know it would be wrong to give an account of the game without the express written consent of Major League Baseball. 1.3597 0.05207 139 99 30 10
905 I'm feeling a win today...we're the home team. 1.3597 0.05106 139 98 32 9
906 You CANNOT believe how cheap these front row seats were 1.3582 0.05339 134 96 28 10
907 and once again, just a bit inside 1.3582 0.05545 134 98 24 12
908 Insurance rates skyrocket as the MLB mandates a work from home policy. 1.3582 0.05014 134 93 34 7
909 They say it's caused by a bat? 1.3582 0.05339 134 96 28 10
910 We're just hoping the USC college recruiter believes the San Diego Quaranteam is a real sports club. 1.3582 0.05125 134 94 32 8
911 He can't talk right now! There's a man on third, 2 outs, and the count is 3 and 2! 1.3582 0.05545 134 98 24 12
912 Yeah, he’s bummed that his season was postponed but he’s still able to work from home. 1.3577 0.05256 137 98 29 10
913 I would never again complain about my husband not staying home. 1.3577 0.05153 137 97 31 9
914 Yeah, the bases are loaded, too. 1.3577 0.05457 137 100 25 12
915 When he said he wanted to get to 3rd base with me, I didn’t know this is what he meant... 1.3577 0.05357 137 99 27 11
916 Those who live in glass houses shouldn’t play ball. 1.3577 0.05256 137 98 29 10
917 OK, OK, you can go back downstairs and play video games! 1.3577 0.05048 137 96 33 8
918 It's a home game, literally. 1.3577 0.04718 137 93 39 5
919 Just hangin’ out...watching the game... 1.3577 0.05048 137 96 33 8
920 I'm not an Inside Baseball expert, but is the cat supposed to cough up a tobacco ball? 1.3577 0.05153 137 97 31 9
921 This isn’t what I had in mind when I said I wanted live baseball back in my living room. 1.3577 0.05457 137 100 25 12
922 No. I don't play...It's too inside baseball for me 1.3577 0.04830 137 94 37 6
923 Watching the game. How about you? 1.3577 0.04940 137 95 35 7
924 I'm just watching the game. What are you up to? 1.3577 0.05256 137 98 29 10
925 Call me intermittently and shout,“Peanuts! Get your peanuts here!” 1.3577 0.05048 137 96 33 8
926 Who do I “root root root” for when they are all my home team? 1.3577 0.05357 137 99 27 11
927 Gotta go — in the middle of a home game. 1.3577 0.04940 137 95 35 7
928 Hey Mom, can you pick them up from practice? 1.3577 0.05256 137 98 29 10
929 Hello, I'd like to schedule a few away games 1.3577 0.04603 137 92 41 4
930 My marriage is in its ninth inning, Deb, and I'm not speaking metaphorically. 1.3577 0.04830 137 94 37 6
931 Annie, hurry it’s damn Field Of Dreams again here in apartment 2n - and we need an umpire 1.3577 0.05256 137 98 29 10
932 He wasn't kidding when he said he'd drive that one home! 1.3577 0.05554 137 101 23 13
933 There’s so much time to kill with this quarantine, they decided to play a doubleheader. 1.3577 0.05153 137 97 31 9
934 Hold on—I’m getting a call from the bullpen. 1.3577 0.05357 137 99 27 11
935 The team have a home advantage. 1.3577 0.05457 137 100 25 12
936 I know how much you miss sports. Just wait until you get home. 1.3577 0.05256 137 98 29 10
937 And over on the couch there I see that there is a fan trying to signal to the pitcher that the cat is trying to steal home! He doesn’t seem to see it though Bill. . . 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
938 A League Of Their Own Home 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
939 This isn't what they meant by working from home 1.3561 0.05498 132 96 25 11
940 So this is what they mean by home game. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
941 I don't know, I think I'm on third base or something. 1.3561 0.05060 132 92 33 7
942 I know there's no crying in baseball,but this is different! 1.3561 0.05602 132 97 23 12
943 I told him I wanted a diamond for my birthday. This was not the diamond I had in mind. 1.3561 0.05498 132 96 25 11
944 Should have married a website designer. 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
945 Technology these days; It’s as if they are playing in my living room! 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
946 Listen, Alice, they think I’m an airhead, but actually I’m stealing their signs. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
947 He declared Fred’s balls were high and inside and now it’s a game. 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
948 A recent study has revealed that quarantining alone at home is still more entertaining that watching a baseball game. 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
949 Well, we just decided it just didn't feel like spring without baseball. 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
950 This is why we can’t buy nice things in this house! 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
951 Baseball leaves me cold but Tibbles chasing the ball around the room makes it bearable. 1.3561 0.05392 132 95 27 10
952 Yeah I'm OK with it -but I had to draw the line with cheerleaders. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
953 Help, New Yorker, Andy Borowitz is inside my house, hitting slow-pitch softballs out of the park, and he just demolished my bookshelf of satirical writings! Sure, I guess a tote bag would make it all better. 1.3561 0.05704 132 98 21 13
954 ESPN needs you to stop for a commercial. 1.3561 0.04944 132 91 35 6
955 With the season on hold, you'd be surprised how cheap it is to rent minor leaguers! 1.3561 0.05173 132 93 31 8
956 No, the lockdown hasn't affected me at all. How about you? 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
957 Yes, I would like to cancel the all access package. 1.3556 0.05094 135 95 32 8
958 Sis, I can live with this but I'll be moving in with you when the NFL season starts. 1.3556 0.05201 135 96 30 9
959 Sorry it’s loud, I’m sitting right by stay-at-home base 1.3556 0.05094 135 95 32 8
960 Can't talk now. He's about to hit a house run. 1.3554 0.05360 121 85 29 7
961 I bought the most darling little pitcher today. 1.3554 0.05487 121 86 27 8
962 So that’s when it hit me — take THE BALLGAME out to ME. 1.3554 0.05611 121 87 25 9
963 He said these Mets cardboard cutouts are still better than watching Nascar 1.3538 0.05445 130 94 26 10
964 I don’t care who wins, I’m not cleaning Gatorade out of the carpet again 1.3538 0.04988 130 90 34 6
965 Everybody, keep your balls in your pants. 1.3538 0.05445 130 94 26 10
966 If you make it to second grab me some pickles from the fridge dear 1.3538 0.04867 130 89 36 5
967 Yes, that's right. A 12-pack of cold ones, 12 brats with everything, and 12 boxes of Cracker Jack. 1.3538 0.04988 130 90 34 6
968 For God's sake, Harry! Flatten the fricking curve! 1.3538 0.04988 130 90 34 6
969 Commentator, spectator, coach and sponsor. All is me! 1.3538 0.05445 130 94 26 10
970 It’s not the broken mirrors I mind as much as the Astroturf carpet. 1.3538 0.05106 130 91 32 7
971 It's the bottom of the ninth, can I call you back? 1.3538 0.04988 130 90 34 6
972 ...peanuts,Cracker Jack. Oh, and two sheets of drywall. 1.3538 0.05222 130 92 30 8
973 Not another breaking pitch! 1.3538 0.04928 130 92 31 7
974 Can't talk now. I'm at a home opener. 1.3538 0.05445 130 94 26 10
975 I'm just glad it's not hockey season. 1.3538 0.04988 130 90 34 6
976 You got two balls. 1.3538 0.04743 130 88 38 4
977 The Boys of Summer are getting old 1.3538 0.05222 130 92 30 8
978 Hello, Delta Dental? 1.3538 0.05222 130 92 30 8
979 Can't talk right now, Helen, the bases are loaded and I'm sitting in the middle of the diamond! 1.3538 0.05335 130 93 28 9
980 I can't wait for an away game. 1.3538 0.04743 130 88 38 4
981 A broken window I can forgive, but not providing peanuts is inexcusable 1.3538 0.04867 130 89 36 5
982 Is repairing windows an essential service? 1.3538 0.04988 130 90 34 6
983 Can you send some to replace a window in about one minute? 1.3538 0.05106 130 91 32 7
984 Can you speak a little louder? It’s hard to hear with that guy in the kitchen banging on the trashcan. 1.3538 0.05222 130 92 30 8
985 At least it's not ice hockey. 1.3538 0.05335 130 93 28 9
986 I've got to hang up now, Mom. I'm on deck. 1.3538 0.04988 130 90 34 6
987 Hello, glass repairs? No, nothing yet, but you might as well get here now. 1.3538 0.05222 130 92 30 8
988 Alex the cat hides as Donna admits to her psychiatrist that she dropped acid 4 times in 1968. 1.3534 0.05566 133 98 23 12
989 Do you think if I tear it down, they will go away? 1.3534 0.05028 133 93 33 7
990 No Peg...the Reds and Cubs are playing in Sally’s apartment. 1.3534 0.05250 133 95 29 9
991 Hello. Yes I'd like to amend my Airbnb terms and conditions. 1.3534 0.05463 133 97 25 11
992 ... and they call me a homewrecker. 1.3534 0.05250 133 95 29 9
993 I’m just glad it isn’t hockey season. 1.3534 0.05028 133 93 33 7
994 They have been staring at each other for about 25 minutes now. They said it was "imagination" baseball. Yeah, it's a Covid thing. 1.3534 0.05358 133 96 27 10
995 The score is tied, it’s the bottom of the 9th, bases loaded and two outs. Other than that, not much. You? 1.3534 0.05250 133 95 29 9
996 I've put a lock on the refrigerator in case they get bored with baseball and want to play ice hockey. 1.3534 0.05028 133 93 33 7
997 Yes, hello... Is window replacement an essential service? 1.3534 0.04553 133 89 41 3
998 Mrs. Klein in 7B has a batting cage in her dining room, but we have better concessions and a Jumbotron. 1.3534 0.05463 133 97 25 11
999 Can I call you back? I'm babysitting the Twins. 1.3534 0.05668 133 99 21 13
1000 They've stolen home. 1.3534 0.05463 133 97 25 11
1001 This is ridiculous. I'm punished for scratching the furniture,but they get to play nine innings. 1.3534 0.05463 133 97 25 11
1002 Now I know the meaning of "inside baseball"! 1.3534 0.05358 133 96 27 10
1003 Can you believe they're charging $15 for warm beer? And it's my house. 1.3534 0.05028 133 93 33 7
1004 Bottom of the 9th, carpets loaded. 1.3534 0.05250 133 95 29 9
1005 Signaling For The Covid Curveball... 1.3534 0.05028 133 93 33 7
1006 Yes, Airbnb 1.3534 0.05668 133 99 21 13
1007 He's still working from home. 1.3534 0.05250 133 95 29 9
1008 So much for take me OUT to the ballgame. 1.3534 0.05250 133 95 29 9
1009 Yes, they're having fun, but only one of them is wearing a mask. 1.3534 0.04914 133 92 35 6
1010 All I said was, I wouldn't mind seeing a home game. 1.3534 0.05028 133 93 33 7
1011 Honey, this is not what I meant when I said I wanted to go to third base. 1.3534 0.05668 133 99 21 13
1012 I can’t come over, it’s the bottom of the 7th and Mickey’s at bat. I’m all set to sing ‘Take me out to the Ball Game’ or anywhere, for that matter! 1.3534 0.05358 133 96 27 10
1013 I am watching the game on ESPN VR. It feels like I am really there! 1.3534 0.05028 133 93 33 7
1014 Tell me again about the infield fly rule. 1.3534 0.04797 133 91 37 5
1015 The cat's going to try to steal second. 1.3534 0.05028 133 93 33 7
1016 I'd like to order peanuts and Cracker Jacks. 1.3534 0.05140 133 94 31 8
1017 I don't know, Jane, it's some sort of TikTok challenge. 1.3534 0.05028 133 93 33 7
1018 I’ll never complain about live sports on TV again 1.3534 0.05140 133 94 31 8
1019 I have a feeling this stay-at-home game is going into extra innings. 1.3534 0.05140 133 94 31 8
1020 Yeah, they're still playing without fans. But I'm liking the new no-spitting rules. 1.3534 0.05140 133 94 31 8
1021 Hello Sharon. They've decided to call themselves the Quaranteam". 1.3534 0.05358 133 96 27 10
1022 When he mentioned baseball in the living room, I had something very different in mind. 1.3529 0.05274 136 98 28 10
1023 Hello, bullpen? We need a left-handed reliever in 4C. 1.3516 0.05033 128 89 33 6
1024 Bottom of the 1st here, Home team 1 - Chihuly vase 0. 1.3511 0.05410 131 95 26 10
1025 Go long 1.3511 0.05189 131 93 30 8
1026 Apparently, this is a home game." 1.3509 0.05570 114 81 26 7
1027 He claims he said ball club, not book club. 1.3488 0.04879 129 89 35 5
1028 Safer at home" my ass 1.3488 0.05352 129 93 27 9
1029 Next week we’ll move the couch and play soccer. 1.3465 0.05169 127 90 30 7
1030 No that’s not the TV, my husband is conducting a PE class for the boys 1.3465 0.05405 127 92 26 9
1031 Hello Über Eats? What’s your ETA on the peanuts and Crackerjack? 1.3465 0.05405 127 92 26 9
1032 The plus side is, every hit can be considered a home run 1.3465 0.05289 127 91 28 8
1033 It beats rodeo night. 1.3465 0.05742 127 95 20 12
1034 Yes, hi - I’d like to cancel the live sports cable package, please. 1.3465 0.05169 127 90 30 7
1035 You'd better eat without him. We're going into extra innings. 1.3465 0.05169 127 90 30 7
1036 It's something about 'A Shot Heard 'round the Living Room.' 1.3465 0.05405 127 92 26 9
1037 Be careful. The cat has been stealing the catcher's signs. 1.3465 0.05520 127 93 24 10
1038 That isn't what I meant when I asked you to pitch in with the housework. 1.3465 0.05047 127 89 32 6
1039 I dunno Ethel, I preferred it when Tuesday was Poker night. 1.3465 0.05289 127 91 28 8
1040 He's got a fabulous inside pitch. 1.3465 0.05520 127 93 24 10
1041 I didn’t expect “Home game” to be so literal. 1.3465 0.05169 127 90 30 7
1042 I've been watching this for 32 years, Marge. He's NOT afraid to throw that slider in the carpet, even with a full count. 1.3465 0.05520 127 93 24 10
1043 Sunflower seeds all over my new Berber throw rug! 1.3465 0.05520 127 93 24 10
1044 This virus has a lot to answer for. 1.3465 0.05289 127 91 28 8
1045 This pitcher has been throwing inside all night 1.3445 0.05395 119 85 27 7
1046 I’m not sure how it started, but the Mets are losing. 1.3443 0.04907 122 84 34 4
1047 I’ll have to call you back, Brenda. Joe’s stealing home. 1.3443 0.05305 122 87 28 7
1048 Well, I did tell the dating service that I was looking for another single. 1.3438 0.05370 128 93 26 9
1049 Hi doctor, yeah, this week I see 3 baseball players in my living room! 1.3438 0.05254 128 92 28 8
1050 No! I'm still on third base. 1.3438 0.05136 128 91 30 7
1051 I think, "who's" pitching, "what's" catching and "I don't know's" is batting. Guys, six feet apart! Merle D. Ulery Miami, FL 1.3438 0.05594 128 95 22 11
1052 It's a hit with him but a swing and a miss with me. 1.3438 0.05254 128 92 28 8
1053 It’s baseball so, yep, still bored. 1.3438 0.05254 128 92 28 8
1054 I’m thinking we’re having hot dogs and beer again tonight, how about you? 1.3438 0.05370 128 93 26 9
1055 This isn't what I had in mind when I ordered a pitcher 1.3438 0.05136 128 91 30 7
1056 Yeah, it’s one more strike and then he’s out...of ideas. We’re getting pretty desperate for entertainment over here. 1.3426 0.05607 108 77 25 6
1057 Yes, Frank is working from home, too. 1.3419 0.05314 117 83 28 6
1058 Our first date, and he's already trying to score. 1.3417 0.05358 120 86 27 7
1059 It's the bottom of the ninth, and the couches are loaded 1.3415 0.05269 123 88 28 7
1060 You wouldn't understand, it's all inside baseball. 1.3415 0.05141 123 87 30 6
1061 Mm-hm. So a vacuum for the sunflower seeds, and soap and water for the chewing tobacco stains? Thanks, mom. 1.3415 0.05010 123 86 32 5
1062 Yeah, well, he’s not getting to first base with me anymore. 1.3415 0.05516 123 90 24 9
1063 Thank goodness we had that third kid! 1.3413 0.05184 126 90 29 7
1064 Hold on, I can’t hear you. Someone’s banging on a trash can. 1.3413 0.05060 126 89 31 6
1065 Brilliant! Now how do you expect we handle the hockey season? 1.3413 0.05423 126 92 25 9
1066 For heaven’s sake Marge, all I did was ask Al to mix the batter up, and the next thing I know ... 1.3413 0.05305 126 91 27 8
1067 The thing is, Cheryl, after two months of daily bread baking, we didn’t have many options left. 1.3413 0.05423 126 92 25 9
1068 They said they play better at home. 1.3413 0.05184 126 90 29 7
1069 You know how life sometimes throws you a curveball? 1.3413 0.04933 126 88 33 5
1070 Time out...we need to decide on the chandelier...an out or a ground rule single? 1.3413 0.05764 126 95 19 12
1071 Your bleachers or mine? 1.3413 0.05305 126 91 27 8
1072 They will be gone soon. He mentioned something about a short stop 1.3413 0.05423 126 92 25 9
1073 Stop!! Playing before live fans hasn't been approved yet. 1.3413 0.05539 126 93 23 10
1074 Yeah, the experts say we're only in the second inning of this thing. 1.3413 0.05184 126 90 29 7
1075 The "miniature-variation" works way better with golf. 1.3413 0.05423 126 92 25 9
1076 I’ll bet all I’ve got on the home team. 1.3413 0.04802 126 87 35 4
1077 Hello State Farm, how many strikes are on my home policy? 1.3413 0.05305 126 91 27 8
1078 Change it up, there's a guy in 4D stealing signs. 1.3413 0.05305 126 91 27 8
1079 What constitutes a home run? 1.3413 0.05764 126 95 19 12
1080 I understand, Sharon ... it's just that when you asked me if I could watch your sons for a while, I didn't know ... 1.3413 0.05539 126 93 23 10
1081 No, strike two was when you scared the cat. 1.3413 0.05060 126 89 31 6
1082 He's been watching that damn Kevin Costner movie on Netflix. 1.3413 0.05423 126 92 25 9
1083 I told Jim he had to wear a mask if his friends came over to play. 1.3413 0.05539 126 93 23 10
1084 It’s just like Field of Dreams — they disappear when my parents come home. 1.3413 0.04933 126 88 33 5
1085 Oh, you know, same old same old. But Clem's home baseball league is up and running! 1.3413 0.05305 126 91 27 8
1086 . . . they're just going a little batty. 1.3413 0.05184 126 90 29 7
1087 It’s no longer safer at home, for me. 1.3411 0.05447 129 95 24 10
1088 Here is Steve - a man who is about to destroy his living room, his marriage, and eventually his life. 1.3411 0.05220 129 93 28 8
1089 Three strikes, you’re outside 1.3411 0.05557 129 96 22 11
1090 I believe we’ve found a new meaning to home-run-hitter. 1.3411 0.05335 129 94 26 9
1091 Having them all home again has been challenging. 1.3411 0.05220 129 93 28 8
1092 Sure I can talk, I'm not getting too many plays at third. 1.3411 0.04983 129 91 32 6
1093 Yes, they are safely home. 1.3411 0.04983 129 91 32 6
1094 Gotta call ya back, the game’s on. 1.3411 0.05103 129 92 30 7
1095 Don't worry. This is much safer than our neighbor's NASCAR. 1.3411 0.05557 129 96 22 11
1096 Can I call you back? I'm on deck with two outs in the ninth. 1.3411 0.04983 129 91 32 6
1097 I gave Harry the okay to join a menage a trois swingers club as long as he played at home. 1.3411 0.05220 129 93 28 8
1098 We're safe at home, but we'd rather be out. 1.3411 0.05447 129 95 24 10
1099 Girlfriend, even getting to first base is difficult with the family always around. 1.3411 0.05447 129 95 24 10
1100 Apparently, I'm covering third base. 1.3411 0.05103 129 92 30 7
1101 Fortunately, the rest of the team is working remotely. 1.3411 0.04733 129 89 36 4
1102 Mom? You won't believe the curveball Al threw me today... 1.3411 0.05220 129 93 28 8
1103 Yes, Mom, this is live from Fenway. I have the crowd on mute. 1.3396 0.06271 106 80 16 10
1104 My job? Yes, it's all home based now. 1.3396 0.05826 106 77 22 7
1105 I know, it finally feels like May here too. 1.3388 0.04917 121 84 33 4
1106 It's literally a home game. 1.3388 0.05449 121 88 25 8
1107 hello? is this playstation customer service? 1.3387 0.04843 124 86 34 4
1108 Hello, Grubhub? Buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jacks. 1.3387 0.04977 124 87 32 5
1109 Yeah, I think he misunderstood when I told him baseball makes me hot. 1.3387 0.05597 124 92 22 10
1110 Can’t talk right now. I’m about to steal home. 1.3387 0.05597 124 92 22 10
1111 Yes, and when you deliver the food can you throw it at me from about 30 yards back? 1.3387 0.05357 124 90 26 8
1112 I know I asked for a ballpark estimate for a house-cleaning but this is ridiculous! 1.3387 0.05357 124 90 26 8
1113 You’ll never know what’ll hit you next! 1.3387 0.05713 124 93 20 11
1114 Hey, hey - no spittin' 1.3387 0.05357 124 90 26 8
1115 No, the resolution is fine. I just don't think the 'Live Sports' package is for me. 1.3387 0.05357 124 90 26 8
1116 I am not sure I want to continue with the HD sports package 1.3387 0.05597 124 92 22 10
1117 This broadcast is from 'The House that Ruth Built.' I'm Ruth." 1.3387 0.05170 124 91 25 8
1118 If this bum gets on base ,I'm calling in Carlos from the kitchen to take over" 1.3387 0.05233 124 89 28 7
1119 With both teams playing at home this week, travel should not be an issue for either squad 1.3386 0.05270 127 92 27 8
1120 I’ll trade you courtside seats for a packet of yeast. 1.3386 0.05387 127 93 25 9
1121 I’m just hoping for rain before the fireworks. 1.3386 0.05387 127 93 25 9
1122 Can’t talk now; bottom of the ninth, bases loaded, two outs, and my husband’s at bat! 1.3386 0.05387 127 93 25 9
1123 Home plate is in the dishwasher!"~Helen Rosenbaum, LI 1.3386 0.05387 127 93 25 9
1124 Yes, they've promised not to spit. 1.3386 0.05270 127 92 27 8
1125 Yes, that's right, I need 50 rolls of bubble wrap for baseball season. 1.3386 0.05387 127 93 25 9
1126 About time they made parking free at home games 1.3386 0.05270 127 92 27 8
1127 That reminds me, I need to mix my cake batter, batter, batter. 1.3386 0.05150 127 91 29 7
1128 Is it still a home run? 1.3386 0.05027 127 90 31 6
1129 They just appeared out of a cornfield. 1.3385 0.05186 130 94 28 8
1130 If they start spitting, they're gone. 1.3385 0.05070 130 93 30 7
1131 Yes they are playing in my house. No Yankees are beating Boston six to three. 1.3385 0.05186 130 94 28 8
1132 Three hot dogs, three beers and some Xanax 1.3385 0.04951 130 92 32 6
1133 Oh, fine I guess. How about you? 1.3385 0.05186 130 94 28 8
1134 He's stealing signs off the hallway mirror. 1.3385 0.05186 130 94 28 8
1135 But what counts as a home run? 1.3365 0.05734 104 75 23 6
1136 'I know it was a home run but I said no running in my home' 1.3364 0.05625 107 77 24 6
1137 Just because Michael Jordan became a baseball player later in life doesn’t mean you can change careers too. You are data analysts. 1.3362 0.05736 116 86 21 9
1138 These lifesize cutouts are so real! 1.3361 0.05240 119 85 28 6
1139 I guess I know what “inside baseball” means now... 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
1140 If you break the lamp, it’s an automatic out. 1.3361 0.05284 122 88 27 7
1141 I think his dream of scoring a home run is just about to come true 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1142 If he thinks this is getting him to third base, he’s sorely mistaken. 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
1143 I need to get out of home base... 1.3361 0.05284 122 88 27 7
1144 I woudln't expect to get tired of homeruns. Ever. But here it is. 1.3361 0.04885 122 85 33 4
1145 And the hits just keep on coming... 1.3361 0.05774 122 92 19 11
1146 Ya, Al’s up to bat now. We’re good. And you? 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
1147 Could be the top of the third, could be the bottom of the ninth, time is an illusion. 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
1148 Who’s On First. What’s on Second. I don’t know is on third. 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
1149 It’s gone too far. David is now ignoring my bunt sign. I wish they’d hurry up with a vaccine. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1150 . « Honestly Carol, for my money, this togetherness theme has begun to overstay its welcome.” 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1151 I never thought I would miss sports on TV. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1152 I have to get out of Queens 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
1153 Also, we're going to meed more hotdogs and crackerjacks. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1154 The home team has a distinct advantage 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
1155 Other than a foul tip taking out my Baccarat vase, same old, same old. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1156 Bottom of the ninth...month of quarantine 1.3361 0.05021 122 86 31 5
1157 They said they'll shave their quarantine beards when they win the World Series. 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
1158 When the cat meows, it's a breaking ball. 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
1159 These 3-D TVs are so sophisticated, I'm a little nervous that "Law & Order" is on after the ballgame. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1160 You'd think they'd get a little bored with bunting 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
1161 It’s so bad even baseball is entertaining. 1.3361 0.04885 122 85 33 4
1162 Naturally, I'm rooting for the home team! 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
1163 It's 200 Balls / 300 Strikes - make this one count 1.3361 0.05284 122 88 27 7
1164 I don't know what I fear more, the coronavirus or a foul ball. 1.3361 0.05284 122 88 27 7
1165 All I said was that I was ready to go to Second Base. 1.3361 0.05021 122 86 31 5
1166 I’m telling you, Millie, I’m the only one in the stadium! 1.3361 0.05284 122 88 27 7
1167 There is no infield fly rule in my living room. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1168 I built it, and they came. Now how the hell do I get rid of them? 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1169 I'm considering it a small victory that they didn't use my plates. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1170 Sure, come on over. There's room for one more designated sitter. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1171 The LSD is kicking in. 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
1172 You remember the good old days, when they just sing and play the guitar under your balcony? 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
1173 no. my boys are tolerating isolation really well. And yours? 1.3361 0.05021 122 86 31 5
1174 I hear MLB is opening the season without fans — crazy! 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1175 Sometimes it feels like no one really SEES me, y’know? 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
1176 Yes, I'd like to check my home insurance coverage. My husband and his friends are getting a little stir-crazy. 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
1177 He's at the bottom of a fifth, loaded, and wants to hit one out of the house. 1.3361 0.04885 122 85 33 4
1178 'It's the end of the world, not the end of baseball.' 1.3361 0.05284 122 88 27 7
1179 Okay, Jeannie. I'll talk to you tomorrow. I'm going to go strap a 12 pack of Coors on my front and wander around yelling for a bit. 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
1180 Kevin, you were right. I built it and they're here. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1181 No, everything is normal. 1.3361 0.05284 122 88 27 7
1182 Gotta go. The television crew wants lunch. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1183 Actually, we are not missing pro sports here at all. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
1184 And to top it all off, I have VIP seating for the game! 1.3333 0.05593 120 89 22 9
1185 On Wednesdays we agreed to re-enact my shows.. 1.3333 0.05563 117 86 23 8
1186 ‘Yeah, turns out I’m quarantining WITH the mets, not IN the met’ 1.3333 0.05067 120 85 30 5
1187 Guys, no spitting, guys! 1.3333 0.05291 117 84 27 6
1188 Bottom of the quarantine 1.3333 0.05593 120 89 22 9
1189 ...If they don’t win it’s a shame. 1.3333 0.05480 111 80 25 6
1190 Sure, I paid a fortune for the seats, but there's no line at the women's restroom this way. 1.3333 0.05466 120 88 24 8
1191 You were right. Even America’s greatest pastime doesn’t help pass time... 1.3333 0.05067 120 85 30 5
1192 He said he was bringing home a big diamond... 1.3333 0.05947 117 89 17 11
1193 I sure hope its a no hitter! 1.3333 0.05374 123 90 25 8
1194 When I heard them say batter's up I thought the dough for the bread was ready 1.3333 0.05429 117 85 25 7
1195 It is not like on TV, but afterward they go and bring me pizza. 1.3333 0.05067 120 85 30 5
1196 911? He stole home. 1.3333 0.05429 117 85 25 7
1197 Don't knock it out of here. 1.3333 0.05204 120 86 28 6
1198 And he wonders why he always strikes out with me. 1.3333 0.05291 117 84 27 6
1199 If he is really Owen Meany, I need to change seats. 1.3333 0.05429 117 85 25 7
1200 It's going better, thanks. Last week they tried hockey. 1.3333 0.05291 117 84 27 6
1201 They're playing inside out of an abundance of stupidity. 1.3333 0.05291 117 84 27 6
1202 They miss baseball so much and everything is insured, so I finally said "go ahead." 1.3333 0.05563 117 86 23 8
1203 Get someone loose in the bullpen, his curve just doesn't have it this year. 1.3333 0.05429 117 85 25 7
1204 I built it, they came, and now I can't get rid of them. 1.3333 0.05694 117 87 21 9
1205 Thanks, Evelyn. We'll touch base next week. 1.3333 0.05067 120 85 30 5
1206 Bob gave me a diamond. 1.3333 0.05694 117 87 21 9
1207 I'm on deck. I can talk. 1.3333 0.05005 117 82 31 4
1208 I swear my dear, these new tv's are getting better and better, it feels that I can touch them 1.3305 0.05523 118 87 23 8
1209 We are all a bit wound up at this point... Jerry especially 1.3305 0.04971 118 83 31 4
1210 Hi are you there? Yes, we’re still on the same round of charades. 1.3305 0.05652 118 88 21 9
1211 I think we’re in for another stay-at-home run... 1.3305 0.05652 118 88 21 9
1212 Hi yes I’d like to speak with a representative about an issue I have with my new cable upgrade 1.3305 0.05254 118 85 27 6
1213 Yeah, the pandemic really gives new meaning to the term 'home run.' 1.3305 0.05390 118 86 25 7
1214 With Nerf-ball, it's catch as cat can. 1.3305 0.05114 118 84 29 5
1215 I’m telling you, my psychiatrist’s prescription is getting stronger... 1.3305 0.05390 118 86 25 7
1216 CDC rules . . . No spitballs! 1.3305 0.05779 118 89 19 10
1217 Oh yeah, and the best part is that I don’t have to pay for cable anymore. 1.3304 0.05485 115 84 24 7
1218 Fastball’s lost its zip. Warm up the southpaw. 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1219 Opening Day, 2020. 1.3304 0.05622 115 85 22 8
1220 And just like that, every hit became a home run. 1.3304 0.05757 115 86 20 9
1221 I hear this is how the 1918 Yankees started their season. 1.3304 0.05485 115 84 24 7
1222 Would it be too much to suggest a bunt? 1.3304 0.05200 115 82 28 5
1223 I admire the creativity the box office has been employing, but I would have rather had a refund of my season tickets, frankly. 1.3304 0.05622 115 85 22 8
1224 Well...it's the bottom of the ninth day and the cat is about to steal home. 1.3304 0.04897 115 80 32 3
1225 The home team is winning. And losing. 1.3304 0.05051 115 81 30 4
1226 O,K. , so it's $2,000 of damage is a single, $5,000 is a double... 1.3304 0.05485 115 84 24 7
1227 You know, with each day that goes by, those protesters are starting to make more and more sense. 1.3304 0.05622 115 85 22 8
1228 Living Room of Dreams 1.3304 0.05757 115 86 20 9
1229 No, he's out. 1.3304 0.05200 115 82 28 5
1230 No, this is an away game. The home games are two doors down. 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1231 I think we're in a league of our own these days. 1.3304 0.05485 115 84 24 7
1232 It's a little crazy here, I'll call you during the 7th inning stretch. 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1233 See,I told you you could order anything from Amazon 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1234 I told them spring cleaning, not spring training. 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1235 Sorry, real quick, where is our rosin bag? 1.3304 0.05200 115 82 28 5
1236 I just hope it's not another line-drive to center-chesterfield. 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1237 Can I call you back? It’s gone into extra innings. 1.3304 0.05051 115 81 30 4
1238 Life is throwing us all a curve ball right now. 1.3304 0.05200 115 82 28 5
1239 Don't worry mom, they all put on shoe covers before the game started. 1.3304 0.05485 115 84 24 7
1240 It’s Ok, Nobody can hit his knuckleball. 1.3304 0.05051 115 81 30 4
1241 Hey that's not what I meant when I said home plate. 1.3304 0.05200 115 82 28 5
1242 Can’t talk, I’m in the middle of a performance of ‘Damn Yankees’ “. 1.3304 0.05200 115 82 28 5
1243 Ma, dad won't let me play! 1.3304 0.05485 115 84 24 7
1244 ....as long as they don't spit tobacco on the new rug.... 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1245 This new subscription service brings the game to you. 1.3304 0.05757 115 86 20 9
1246 Mom, only one player is wearing a mask, and they are not abiding by social distancing rules! 1.3304 0.05485 115 84 24 7
1247 Not much, what's up with you?" 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1248 Yeah, they're at home tonight. 1.3304 0.05051 115 81 30 4
1249 We're trying to figure out what's "home" 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1250 Nah,I'm just sitting here watching a ball game,what about you? 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1251 Home-team 21 Covid 19 1.3304 0.05200 115 82 28 5
1252 The game is to close to call 1.3304 0.05757 115 86 20 9
1253 Now they're doing the entire Broadway season. After "Take Me Out" it's "Tootsie." 1.3304 0.05622 115 85 22 8
1254 A bit unnerving—I’m pretty much in the strike zone. 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1255 I had to move the china cabinet out of the dining room, and keep the bathroom open for first base, but it was worth it. 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1256 No...I'm just watching the game...what's new with you? 1.3304 0.05051 115 81 30 4
1257 Not as much damage done as Mom’s bowling club last week. 1.3304 0.05344 115 83 26 6
1258 Well, got to do the wave. Call you back during the seventh-inning stretch. 1.3304 0.05485 115 84 24 7
1259 He's 3 and 2, can I take a message? 1.3304 0.05135 112 79 29 4
1260 The title for my piece on hallucinogenic micro-dosing to combat quarantine-associated mood disorders just hit me: ‘High and Inside’. 1.3303 0.05538 109 79 24 6
1261 Let me give you the rundown. Nobody here is going to reach third base. 1.3300 0.06039 100 74 19 7
1262 Bases are Loaded. No where to go! We're already home. 1.3277 0.05079 119 85 29 5
1263 The game feels too easy when every base is technically home 1.3276 0.05581 116 86 22 8
1264 Lemme call you back. Looks like we're going into extra innings 1.3276 0.05162 116 83 28 5
1265 As real as it gets 1.3276 0.05306 116 84 26 6
1266 Cat: The humans are up to some weird sh*t again. 1.3276 0.05445 116 85 24 7
1267 Why do baseball players handle quarantine so well? Because they are always safe at home. 😂 1.3276 0.05445 116 85 24 7
1268 Look, I don’t need to explain myself. I just need another order of your cheapest windows. 1.3276 0.04863 116 81 32 3
1269 One might say we have the home advantage. 1.3276 0.05445 116 85 24 7
1270 What a bunch of Bush leaguers. Only one of them had the decency to wear a mask. 1.3276 0.05162 116 83 28 5
1271 It's a sacrifice. 1.3276 0.05162 116 83 28 5
1272 Ma, hi, hold on... "It's a tie game, bottom of the ninth. The bases are loaded and here's the pitch." ...Mom, I'm back. It's not the same without the fans. 1.3276 0.05306 116 84 26 6
1273 Hold on—I’ve gotta make another call. 1.3276 0.05306 116 84 26 6
1274 I should be glad the boys will still play with their father, but would it kill them to go outside? 1.3276 0.05162 116 83 28 5
1275 Sheltering in place really threw me for a curve. 1.3276 0.05015 116 82 30 4
1276 Nah, the guys hardly miss it. 1.3276 0.05714 116 87 20 9
1277 I just hope it's not a spitball 1.3276 0.04863 116 81 32 3
1278 I've got some inside tips on the home team. 1.3276 0.05714 116 87 20 9
1279 Gotta run -- I'm the designated fan for the game today. 1.3276 0.05162 116 83 28 5
1280 Seats so good, it’s like we’re on the field. 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1281 Uber's new sports game delivery service is great during these times 1.3274 0.05250 113 81 27 5
1282 the national pastime when all you have is time 1.3274 0.05543 113 83 23 7
1283 It's my fault. I pestered him for a diamond. 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1284 Gotta run, Gladys...I'm next batter up 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1285 No need to worry about your Lladro collection, dear. Steve's batting average is only .153. 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1286 No, he hasn’t made it home yet. 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1287 Exciting game! But we do have the home team advantage... 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1288 Send in a lefty. 1.3274 0.05684 113 84 21 8
1289 Can I order some peanuts and Cracker Jacks? 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1290 So we built it, and, sure enough, they came. 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1291 I’d like to put my money on the home team. 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1292 I'm disappointed. Only one of them is wearing a mask. 1.3274 0.05543 113 83 23 7
1293 Hello Commissioner, the Astro's are at it again. 1.3274 0.05097 113 80 29 4
1294 We're in the COVID-19th inning. 1.3274 0.05250 113 81 27 5
1295 Can I call you back? It's 2 outs in the bottom of the ninth. 1.3274 0.05097 113 80 29 4
1296 Not much going on here. How are you and Pete faring? 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1297 Lately I feel he’s been bringing work home with him” 1.3274 0.05543 113 83 23 7
1298 It's OK Mom, they're playing with a cotton ball. 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1299 Tommy! You are not 6 feet behind Danny! 1.3274 0.05250 113 81 27 5
1300 Ok, fine. So I should have said I wasn't up for an outing OR an inning 1.3274 0.05097 113 80 29 4
1301 Come over - I can't do the wave without you! 1.3274 0.05543 113 83 23 7
1302 That's right, Mom, I'm a manager now. 1.3274 0.04940 113 79 31 3
1303 It's amazing how often they strike out with a wiffleball. 1.3274 0.05399 113 82 25 6
1304 I don’t have a choice but to root for the home team 1.3271 0.05905 107 80 19 8
1305 Same ol', same ol'...you? 1.3248 0.04980 117 83 30 4
1306 Bottom of the eighth... week of quarantine. 1.3246 0.05359 114 83 25 6
1307 Live from New York, it’s Saturday Night! 1.3246 0.05777 114 86 19 9
1308 Not a lot has changed at our house, except now the sports channel has some pretty high definition. 1.3246 0.05502 114 84 23 7
1309 Of all the virtual backgrounds, you had to pick the one with my mother in law on the couch? 1.3246 0.05502 114 84 23 7
1310 I'll turn off the stove when I get to 3rd 1.3246 0.05212 114 82 27 5
1311 To be honest, we're going a little batty over here. 1.3246 0.05502 114 84 23 7
1312 They're called Stay Home Runs now, and base hits are Stay Safe Hits, but it's basically the same game. 1.3246 0.04744 114 79 33 2
1313 Not my worry, Elise. It's an Air B & B. 1.3246 0.05502 114 84 23 7
1314 Top of the 37th. Cat's on deck. How's your family holding up? 1.3246 0.05502 114 84 23 7
1315 I'm thrilled they're back in action, but the catcher is the only one wearing a mask. 1.3246 0.05502 114 84 23 7
1316 No, he didn't build it this time, but they came anyway. 1.3246 0.05212 114 82 27 5
1317 It was a silent auction and I bid on front row seats at a Phillies home game. 1.3246 0.05212 114 82 27 5
1318 Yes, I’m scared....but simultaneously craving hot dogs! 1.3246 0.04577 114 78 35 1
1319 Why don't you throw this one, OUTSIDE! 1.3246 0.05502 114 84 23 7
1320 Fortunately, they couldn’t get the Zamboni through the front door. 1.3246 0.05359 114 83 25 6
1321 Are you the guy who told the team to quarantine at home? 1.3246 0.06040 114 88 15 11
1322 It's a Nerf Ball, right? Please tell me it's a Nerf Ball! 1.3246 0.05502 114 84 23 7
1323 Get me a lefty. The guy on deck hit one through the ceiling last time up, and we just put the little one down for a nap. 1.3246 0.05502 114 84 23 7
1324 Infield’s at “kitchen depth”, outfield’s at the rear fence! 1.3246 0.05502 114 84 23 7
1325 With all these innings, I'm in need of a real outing! 1.3246 0.05359 114 83 25 6
1326 Not much, just spitting and scratching. 1.3246 0.05061 114 81 29 4
1327 It's a little claustrophobic, but we're taking it day by day. 1.3246 0.05359 114 83 25 6
1328 Honey they told me to bring my work home 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1329 Yeah apparently, ‘If you build it, they will come,’ works during quarantine, too. 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1330 At least it’s not football. 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1331 Quarantine is going great, why do you ask? 1.3243 0.05602 111 82 22 7
1332 You should see their heinies in these pants, Laraine. 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1333 ...no, my issue is that they insisted on going with designated hitters... 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1334 lockdown’s messing with our sense of proportion, pam. i thought it was a lovely idea when the kids suggested a ‘game night’... 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1335 I really thought we’d be done with this by now when I decided to host game night. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1336 He always hits well at home 1.3243 0.05747 111 83 20 8
1337 Yes,I can get you season tickets but bathroom privileges are extra 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1338 Honey, I think it's time for the boys to move out 1.3243 0.04984 111 78 30 3
1339 It’s OK, two of them are maintaining social distancing and the other is wearing a mask. 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1340 Yes, the cat is out. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1341 Hey, Mom. I can't talk now - today's a home game. 1.3243 0.04984 111 78 30 3
1342 Put the divorce off , Geoff says he’ll play ball 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1343 Somehow there are three innings left.. 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1344 It’s not the first baseline. But hey, front row seat. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1345 Bring in the lefty, before I get killed. 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1346 Yes, please, beer and hot dogs. Oh! And we’re out of chewing tobacco. 1.3243 0.04984 111 78 30 3
1347 Finally, tomorrow they start an away series in apartment 7H. 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1348 My damage deposit is a goner, but now I know what a split-finger fastball does! 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1349 Hold on, the edible just kicked in. 1.3243 0.05888 111 84 18 9
1350 I tried to leave, but they insisted it wasn't the same without the audience 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1351 Home field advantage is a myth. It’s just as slow and dull from here. 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1352 If the cat meows twice, it’s a breaking ball. 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1353 I know he has a no-hitter going, but I show his pitch count at 105-I say we pull him. 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1354 Just a second, Louise. It’s a 3-2 count. 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1355 I think the cat is stealing my signals 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1356 It’s tied at 246, inning number 3,889. 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1357 Let's just say I'm betting the house on this being a no-hitter. 1.3243 0.05302 111 80 26 5
1358 This is our last home game of the season. 1.3243 0.04984 111 78 30 3
1359 'Stay-at-Home' is way more fun than I had thought! 1.3243 0.05454 111 81 24 6
1360 It is hard to see this turning out well. 1.3243 0.05145 111 79 28 4
1361 The Yankees are playing at home tonight. 1.3243 0.05602 111 82 22 7
1362 Hi Betty. We’re gonna be late. They’ve gone into extra innings. 1.3241 0.05708 108 80 21 7
1363 Honestly, this started way before quarantine. 1.3235 0.05425 102 73 25 4
1364 Usually, I would ask them not to play ball in the house; but, honestly, there are no rules anymore. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1365 Well I don’t agree with the Designated Sitter rule either, but it’s their home game and not mine 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1366 Did you say 6 feet or 60 feet? 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1367 I wish the league had just cancelled the season. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1368 Yes, I’m loving Field of Dreams home edition. Was thinking bout Magic Mike next. 1.3214 0.05703 112 84 20 8
1369 it's just that nothing he does surprises me anymore" 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1370 I'm on third with a lead, can I call you when I get home? 1.3214 0.05703 112 84 20 8
1371 All we’ve got left in this house is a can of corn. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1372 Hold on a second. Batter, batter, batter, swing batter! Okay, as I was saying... 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1373 Yes Doc, we all have a spring fever over here. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1374 Yeah, the president said that this was safe 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1375 Well, this could be a ‘home run’ 1.3214 0.05978 112 86 16 10
1376 I’m still paying the full cost of college tuition for this? 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1377 I am telling you, this TV is too real to be true. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1378 No, honey... it's live, LIVE! 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1379 'Crowding home plate' is an understatement… 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1380 The ball field isn't much, but the stands are comfortable. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1381 Yeah, hi, I'm going to need some replacement windows--like, all of them?" 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1382 No, I ‘m not worried about the furniture, nobody can hit his knuckleball. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1383 Yeah, they're playing a home game. 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1384 I’m asking YOU who’s in my living room. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1385 Well, I built it, and they came. 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1386 Sorry, I've got to make another call 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1387 Six feet! We're in QUARANTINE PEOPLE!!!! 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1388 I was just browsing on Amazon.com and decided to buy the New York Mets. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1389 Not what I meant when I referred to “inside baseball” 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1390 Apparently the house was built on an old Cleveland Indians burial ground. 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1391 I’m not sure about my new boyfriend. He’s got two balls on him now, but pretty soon he’ll strike out. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1392 My boys are good! How are you? 1.3214 0.05978 112 86 16 10
1393 I think proper baseball distancing calls for 60 ft and 6 inches 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1394 It’s only our first date and he’s trying to get to third base already. 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1395 The only positive of this inside game is I will get to redecorate the living room after the shut down is over. 1.3214 0.05703 112 84 20 8
1396 I was fine with it until they added the designated hitter. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1397 I think I might be third base. 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1398 It's just not as good as when you can throw peanut shells on the floor. 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1399 Call ya back. Coach signaled bunt or blunt. It's a win either way. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1400 Yes, I told them they all need to be wearing masks to play outside. 1.3214 0.05703 112 84 20 8
1401 Yes, that's the oven alarm. My relief pitcher has been warming up in the kitchen - time to bring him out. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1402 That's not the worst of it. Only one of them is wearing a mask! 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1403 Alex is stealing signs off the mirror in the hall. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1404 Where did you put the giant Cubs foam hand? 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1405 We join "Inside Baseball" already in progress. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1406 Psst...hey, batter! I'll tap the throw pillow twice when a curveball is coming." 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1407 My date is determined to get to second base. 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1408 Hang on guys, Replay Operations Center is saying the last hit wasn't a foul! 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1409 I'll call you back, I've got to make some crowd noises. 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1410 We have only 4 gloves left, but at least Bobby has a mask. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1411 I’ll call you right back, bases are loaded... 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1412 I gotta go. My quaranteam is here. 1.3214 0.05703 112 84 20 8
1413 Technically they are both the home team. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1414 Does my homeowner insurance cover sports injuries? 1.3214 0.05703 112 84 20 8
1415 At least it is not hockey 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1416 Eleven dollars for a Budweiser!? 1.3214 0.05842 112 85 18 9
1417 I don’t know, ma - live sports seem overrated to me. 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1418 Remember, you can play indoors but no spitting. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1419 The infield fly rule is killing the game. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1420 Why oh why didn't I bet on the stripes! 20 dollars and a lamp down the drain. 1.3214 0.05560 112 83 22 7
1421 Don't worry anything I hit is a HOME run. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1422 Susan realized quickly that suggesting the lamp as a foul pole was not one of her better ideas. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1423 They're into extra innings, and no one's going out. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1424 Step back two inches. Your nose is still only 5'10" from his butt. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1425 It’s mostly harmless, although I did forbid them from chewing tobacco. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1426 It's great except for all the spitting. 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1427 It's the bottom of the ninth, I hope to god! 1.3214 0.05413 112 82 24 6
1428 It's tied. Dave's up and Billy just hit an in-the -den home run. 1.3214 0.05262 112 81 26 5
1429 That's right. It's a home game. 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1430 Honey, did you order the Quarantine Sports Package? 1.3214 0.05703 112 84 20 8
1431 They play better at home. 1.3214 0.05107 112 80 28 4
1432 This one hits home differently. Ah, not the vase! 1.3211 0.05028 109 77 29 3
1433 Fantasy Baseball takes on new meaning... 1.3211 0.05028 109 77 29 3
1434 On the bright side, baseball has started again. 1.3211 0.05512 109 80 23 6
1435 Words were said. A game broke out. 1.3211 0.05194 109 78 27 4
1436 It's the top of the ninth, and the cat's stealin' home. 1.3211 0.06097 109 84 15 10
1437 I've got to call you back, I think the hydroxycloroquin I've been taking has finally kicked in 1.3211 0.05028 109 77 29 3
1438 No, he only made it to second base. 1.3211 0.05194 109 78 27 4
1439 Can you connect me with windows repair? 1.3211 0.05664 109 81 21 7
1440 I'll call you back on Tuesday. They have an away game. 1.3211 0.04856 109 76 31 2
1441 How am I supposed to hit a home run when mom says no running in the house? 1.3208 0.05113 106 75 28 3
1442 Start warming up grandma...dad has thrown everything but the kitchen sink 1.3208 0.05615 106 78 22 6
1443 I’m rooting for the home team. 1.3208 0.04934 106 74 30 2
1444 Oh, you know, just killing time with Whitey, Mickey, and Yogi. 1.3208 0.05286 106 76 26 4
1445 I dunno, Jack. I just don't think "who's on first" works on Zoom. 1.3208 0.05113 106 75 28 3
1446 I’ve got to hang up, Doris. Holding the phone is the hit-and-run sign. 1.3204 0.05556 103 75 23 5
1447 Pray for a no-hitter. 1.3186 0.05518 113 84 22 7
1448 We’ve really just been keeping to ourselves. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1449 Did he say if hydroxychloroquine also treated cabin fever? 1.3182 0.05155 110 79 27 4
1450 Turns out the team wants you to sing the Pledge Of Allegiance for the next home game 1.3182 0.06048 110 85 15 10
1451 I don’t know, Jill. I guess I’m just not crazy about virtual reality. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1452 Honestly, Doctor, I rather enjoy the side effects. 1.3182 0.04991 110 78 29 3
1453 I can't talk now. The runner on third is about to steal home. 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1454 Jan, you won’t believe it, he’s on his 63rd consecutive home run! 1.3182 0.05909 110 84 17 9
1455 It’s called Meta Sports. For instance, you can hit a home-home-run. 1.3182 0.04991 110 78 29 3
1456 So technically we got to second base on our first date 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1457 So this is what sitting in the dugout feels like.. 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1458 I don’t know how they know who’s winning when each run is a home run. 1.3182 0.05620 110 82 21 7
1459 No, mum, they don't wanna play chess! 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1460 Hello and thank you for calling the bullpen. Due to COVID-19 we are currently taking online orders only... 1.3182 0.05155 110 79 27 4
1461 I have to go. No one is playing center-dining room. 1.3182 0.04821 110 77 31 2
1462 The boys are giving new meaning to the phase "Inside Baseball." 1.3182 0.05620 110 82 21 7
1463 Lucky for the windows, it’s a no-hitter” 1.3182 0.04991 110 78 29 3
1464 No, not much. Just watching the ball game. 1.3182 0.05620 110 82 21 7
1465 the doctor told me to call if the withdrawal symptoms got worse ... 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1466 I wouldn't mind if they weren't constantly spitting 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1467 Mom, I must hang up, the game starts now. 1.3182 0.04991 110 78 29 3
1468 I clearly said “spring cleaning,” not “spring training.” 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1469 Yes, they're taking the stay at home thing to a whole new level. 1.3182 0.05766 110 83 19 8
1470 I gave them an ultimatum – three strikes and they're out. 1.3182 0.05620 110 82 21 7
1471 You’d better duck because there’s going to be a line drive coming at you next door 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1472 I hope we don’t go into extra innings... 1.3182 0.05155 110 79 27 4
1473 This is not what I had in mind when I asked my sales team to come over and practice a good pitch 1.3182 0.05766 110 83 19 8
1474 So, I said I thought our relationship had progressed to where he should consider giving me a diamond... 1.3182 0.05620 110 82 21 7
1475 It doesn't say how to get them back into the video. 1.3182 0.06048 110 85 15 10
1476 I ordered the “baseball-to-go.” It’s a bit slow but less destructive than the rugby I had yesterday. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1477 No worries, at this point he'll never get to first base. 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1478 I told him the catcher needed to be six feet away from home plate, but he never listens. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1479 Of course I protested, but the Umpire called it safe and threatened to eject me! 1.3182 0.05766 110 83 19 8
1480 I warned them, but Bob says the 6 feet doesn't apply if you're wearing a mask. 1.3182 0.04991 110 78 29 3
1481 Yes Marcie, I couldn’t go to the game because of that darn virus ... but I ordered it online. 1.3182 0.05766 110 83 19 8
1482 Don't walk him; he's got no place to go. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1483 They’re at home tonight. 1.3182 0.05766 110 83 19 8
1484 I'm not comfortable with the direction owners are taking with live baseball. 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1485 I’ll call you back. Fauci’s on deck. 1.3182 0.05766 110 83 19 8
1486 Oh, hold on a sec, something might be happening. 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1487 Honestly, this is worse than getting COVID. 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1488 Boys, what did I tell you about wearing shoes in the house? 1.3182 0.05620 110 82 21 7
1489 Yeah, I regret saying that this sport couldn't possibly be more unbearable to watch. 1.3182 0.05909 110 84 17 9
1490 I told him to find something to keep him busy. Yeah, he thinks he's hilarious. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1491 I think we're okay until he learns to hit that fastball. 1.3182 0.05155 110 79 27 4
1492 Yeah Kevin is 2 for 3 but he still hasn’t done the dishes. 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1493 We wanted the pay-per-view extreme sports, but not at this level. 1.3182 0.05155 110 79 27 4
1494 I’d like to order four hotdogs, eight beers, and a new third base man. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1495 Hold on a second—I want to watch my husband swing. 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1496 I have to call you back Maude. It’s the top of the 9th and in this new Covid arena I am sitting on 3rd base. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1497 We should have bought a wii while we could. 1.3182 0.06185 110 86 13 11
1498 He keeps telling me its better than being quarantined with The Jets. 1.3182 0.05155 110 79 27 4
1499 Yes Mom I'll tell him "Hey batter batter batter.............swing!" 1.3182 0.05766 110 83 19 8
1500 I don't mind the game, but only one is wearing a mask! 1.3182 0.05766 110 83 19 8
1501 At least the bathroom lines are shorter. 1.3182 0.05155 110 79 27 4
1502 Just watching the game - it’s close! 1.3182 0.05620 110 82 21 7
1503 They're in the home stretch. 1.3182 0.05469 110 81 23 6
1504 Last week it was a fight club. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1505 We're all less than six feet apart, and the only one wearing a mask is the catcher. 1.3182 0.05314 110 80 25 5
1506 Sorry Mrs. Epstein, we'll replace the window. 1.3182 0.05620 110 82 21 7
1507 Thank goodness it's an Airbnb. 1.3182 0.04821 110 77 31 2
1508 Yeah my seats are great and the beer is decent, but there are now three windows that I'll need to replace and there is tobacco juice all over the carpet. 1.3182 0.05766 110 83 19 8
1509 Can I call you back? I’m on deck. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1510 It's week 10 and I'm still not familiar with the rules. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1511 Take me in to the ballgame, take me away from the crowd... 1.3178 0.05074 107 76 28 3
1512 2020 has been so crazy. Yeah, I’m expecting the next curveball any second. 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1513 Yes Mr CEO of ESPN. I know you desperately need to cover a live sporting event tonight but my house is a mess and my in-laws are gonna be watching! 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1514 I'm not worried. He can't hit right-handed pitching worth a damn. 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1515 Finally! A front row seat to the Yankees! 1.3178 0.06027 107 82 16 9
1516 Before my very eyes, life is becoming a whole new ballgame! 1.3178 0.05245 107 77 26 4
1517 When you told him to steal home plate last week, my china went missing! 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1518 I can't talk, Larry's pitching a no-hitter 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1519 They're scared to go outside without an N95. 1.3178 0.05727 107 80 20 7
1520 Amazon? Can you send some hydroxychloroquine-flavored chewing tobacco right away? 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1521 Granny says HEY, BATTA BATTA BATTA! 1.3178 0.05879 107 81 18 8
1522 The kids moving home was tolerable, but Melvin reliving their Little League days is pushing me over the edge! 1.3178 0.05410 107 78 24 5
1523 We're fine. Just hunkering down at home base. 1.3178 0.05571 107 79 22 6
1524 So,my doctor's like,yup,typical side effects for pastimerol,but call him if there's extra innings. 1.3173 0.05511 104 76 23 5
1525 I'm swinging for the toilet. 1.3153 0.05427 111 82 23 6
1526 A stay at home run 1.3148 0.05527 108 80 22 6
1527 Gotta go...the home game is on! 1.3148 0.05035 108 77 28 3
1528 They cancelled all the sports games, so I’ve begun to hallucinate them. 1.3148 0.05978 108 83 16 9
1529 When I said home plate, I didn’t mean Nana’s china! 1.3148 0.05831 108 82 18 8
1530 Honey, the Astros just joined the Zoom call. 1.3148 0.05681 108 81 20 7
1531 Forget days, I don't even know what inning it is anymore. 1.3148 0.05527 108 80 22 6
1532 Your wife's complaints about us are baseless. 1.3148 0.05527 108 80 22 6
1533 Sheltering at home base 1.3148 0.05831 108 82 18 8
1534 I’d like to place an order for some peanuts, Cracker Jacks, and a Jumbotron. 1.3148 0.05035 108 77 28 3
1535 Can’t talk right now. Back in a bit. We’re tied and this could be the winning run! I just waxed the floor. 1.3148 0.05368 108 79 24 5
1536 They can't stop now, the vases are loaded! 1.3148 0.05368 108 79 24 5
1537 Softball, boys! Softball! 1.3148 0.05368 108 79 24 5
1538 This lockdown is making these boys batty. 1.3148 0.05527 108 80 22 6
1539 I'd say corona's been bad for the sport, but I've honestly seen more of it now than before. 1.3148 0.05368 108 79 24 5
1540 Could I possibly come over and quarantine with you? 1.3148 0.05368 108 79 24 5
1541 No, no, I can get him for you -- left field's just in the bathroom. 1.3148 0.05681 108 81 20 7
1542 And now stepping up to the plate fresh from the dugout in his bedroom it's Kevin, a promising college sophomore who just ended his virtual spring semester 1.3148 0.05681 108 81 20 7
1543 Hold on, Sarah, I have to go bang on a trash can. 1.3148 0.05527 108 80 22 6
1544 I expect him home any minute. 1.3148 0.05368 108 79 24 5
1545 Um, yes, well, I ordered a number eight dinner, and it appears I've received a designated hitter. Sure, I can hold. 1.3148 0.05831 108 82 18 8
1546 It's not so bad, Mom. They're letting me be third base... 1.3148 0.05035 108 77 28 3
1547 The Quarantine League isn’t so bad. It’s not like they’re the Mets. 1.3148 0.05831 108 82 18 8
1548 Getting to first base is harder than it looks... 1.3148 0.05681 108 81 20 7
1549 Not quite what Edna imagined when she invited Harry back to her place for a home run. 1.3148 0.05831 108 82 18 8
1550 Row 1, Seat 2, third base side - you can't miss me. 1.3148 0.05368 108 79 24 5
1551 And remember’No Spitballs’... 1.3148 0.05681 108 81 20 7
1552 I don't think I'm too close. 1.3148 0.05527 108 80 22 6
1553 All I said was that I miss live sports. 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1554 What do you mean ‘what’s that sound’? Francine, I told you, they’re playing in the living room! 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1555 'I don't know if its the 4D technology or the quarantine' 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1556 Working from home base. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1557 The cat would tap its litter box with its tail to let everyone know a hairball was coming. 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1558 Well at least he's finally getting some exercise. 1.3143 0.05120 105 75 27 3
1559 Damn, this year just keeps throwing me curves. 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1560 Gary, no cleats on the carpet. 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1561 Billy, tell Susie to start warming up. Bobby’s getting killed in here. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1562 We sprung for the good seats this year. 1.3143 0.06100 105 81 15 9
1563 ... and The worst part is that only one of them is wearing a mask. 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1564 Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn! 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1565 This guy's losing his stuff. Have a lefty start warming up in the kitchen. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1566 Yeah, I don’t know how much longer I can handle him working from home! 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1567 Actually, it's more interesting than the real thing. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1568 Work from home game 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1569 Do you repair windows? 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1570 Actually, we have better hot dogs. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1571 Herb has come a long way with his curveball the last two months. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1572 Bases loaded, bottom of the 9th. How is the cordon bleu coming? 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1573 Well, it's nice. But it's not the diamond I would have chosen. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1574 I don’t know anything about this game but I understand why they call it a home run 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1575 Can't talk now, I have to steal back home. 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1576 Well, they’re definitely six feet apart, but the catcher’s mask seems inadequate. 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1577 Still at home. 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1578 Dr. Fauci? I need professional advice on the Infield Fly Rule. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1579 There is no doubt it is an inside pitch. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1580 Carol, I'm telling you, these televisions are becoming too advanced! It's like they're in my living room! 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
1581 Yep, we 're still coping with sibling rivalry. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1582 We're coping. I just hope this doesn't go into ski season. 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1583 I'd rather you guys play Pokémon Go indoors. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1584 I finally figured out what they mean by the "home team advantage." 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1585 The season has already started over here. 1.3143 0.04938 105 74 29 2
1586 Well, I was cooking and I said "bring the batter," and then I just allowed him to get in one home run. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1587 Mudville isn’t the only place with no joy. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1588 Hi Sophie. Can i borrow a plate? 1.3143 0.05631 105 78 21 6
1589 There's no living with him since we rented "Pride of the Yankees"---- 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1590 Catcher is the only one with a mask, so no spitting! 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1591 They actually practice that silly stuff they do at a game. 1.3143 0.05948 105 80 17 8
1592 Can I call you back? It's the top of the ninth and the cat's on deck. 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1593 Hello Commissioner, the Astros are stealing signs again 1.3143 0.05466 105 77 23 5
1594 That’s why they call it a home game. 1.3143 0.05296 105 76 25 4
1595 Oh nothing, just watching the game ... 1.3140 0.05792 86 62 21 3
1596 Nothing much, just catching a home game. 1.3140 0.06024 86 63 19 4
1597 Home plate is in the dishwasher 1.3140 0.05551 86 61 23 2
1598 Lets make this home run. 1.3125 0.05234 112 82 25 5
1599 Yeah hi - Boston Red Sox? This is the secretary for the Houston Astros. I have figured out a better way to steal signs. 1.3125 0.05795 96 71 20 5
1600 Hi, yes. I'd like to report a stolen base. 1.3113 0.05423 106 78 23 5
1601 This wasn't what I meant when I said you could start A League of Their Own. 1.3113 0.05586 106 79 21 6
1602 Hello? DirecTV? I think you might have gone a little too far with my MLB EXTRA INNINGS package. 1.3113 0.05254 106 77 25 4
1603 I’d like to order some peanuts and crackerjacks for curbside, please 1.3113 0.05744 106 80 19 7
1604 Okay boys, take it home. No seriously, you’ve overstayed your welcome. 1.3113 0.05899 106 81 17 8
1605 Hello. Yes, I’d like to order some peanuts and Cracker Jack. 1.3113 0.05080 106 76 27 3
1606 There’s been an error. 1.3113 0.05586 106 79 21 6
1607 I'm telling you, this gives a new meaning to inside baseball. 1.3113 0.05586 106 79 21 6
1608 Hi Mary? Could you tell Jake that centerfield starts to the right of the chaise lounge? 1.3113 0.05254 106 77 25 4
1609 Yeah, that's right. Eight bags of peanuts and six boxes of crackerjacks. 1.3113 0.05254 106 77 25 4
1610 we bought this condo with "battery included", now i know what they meant 1.3113 0.05899 106 81 17 8
1611 I wanted to follow the stay-at-home instruction but really missed live baseball. 1.3113 0.05080 106 76 27 3
1612 Yes, I know it’s a luxury but I just love watching live baseball in my living room 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1613 Frankly, these live streams are getting a little ridiculous. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
1614 At least I have a great seat for the game. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1615 Of course the catcher’s wearing a mask. 1.3107 0.05168 103 74 26 3
1616 I never really understood the term “home team” until now. 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
1617 every hit is a homerun 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1618 He gave me a diamond for our anniversary. 1.3107 0.05694 103 77 20 6
1619 Looks like he can stay at home but he’s definitely not safe. 1.3103 0.05965 87 64 19 4
1620 Actually, the boys are really enjoying the lockdown. 1.3103 0.05965 87 64 19 4
1621 Hold on, it’s the payoff pitch 1.3100 0.04861 100 70 29 1
1622 My husband lost his job and now thinks baseball is his calling. 1.3100 0.05631 100 74 21 5
1623 Of course I root, root, root for the home team. 1.3084 0.05213 107 78 25 4
1624 I take it back, Fred. Marble racing was just fine. 1.3077 0.05647 104 78 20 6
1625 None of this is a good idea", thinks Pickles the cat umpire 1.3077 0.05479 104 77 22 5
1626 I agreed as long as the bathroom wasn’t in fair territory. 1.3077 0.05479 104 77 22 5
1627 The losing team has to chop the veggies. 1.3077 0.04941 104 74 28 2
1628 It's the only way we could get the Mets in the World Series. 1.3077 0.05647 104 78 20 6
1629 At least he didn't take up hockey. 1.3077 0.05127 104 75 26 3
1630 They want me to play Right Field but I'm not sure that it matters. 1.3077 0.05479 104 77 22 5
1631 Just watching the "Game of the Week" - you? 1.3077 0.05306 104 76 24 4
1632 Nothing much...just watching a game. 1.3077 0.05479 104 77 22 5
1633 I can't talk now. It's tied, with two outs in the ninth and a runner at the refrigerator. 1.3077 0.05647 104 78 20 6
1634 Ludicrous either way, Susan. It’s come to this: either I relax and enjoy or tear out my hair. 1.3077 0.06122 104 81 14 9
1635 The Segal sculptures arrived. 1.3077 0.05647 104 78 20 6
1636 I've got to go, Jerry just gave me the sign to steal home 1.3077 0.05810 104 79 18 7
1637 Oh, and some peanuts and Cracker Jack 1.3077 0.05127 104 75 26 3
1638 What sports streaming subscription did we exactly upgrade to? 1.3077 0.05127 104 75 26 3
1639 Rick? He's fine, just in a bit of a slump. 1.3077 0.05479 104 77 22 5
1640 I built it, but I didn’t actually think they’d come 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1641 He insisted on home-field advantage. 1.3069 0.05023 101 72 27 2
1642 I can't, I'm on deck. 1.3069 0.04822 101 71 29 1
1643 I'll wear two masks. Two. Just let me come back to work. 1.3069 0.05758 101 76 19 6
1644 Thankfully, the pitcher has been absolutely unhittable. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
1645 Sorry, can't talk now. Its 3 and 2, no score and...the bottom of my life. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1646 I'm not worried. Larry can't hit the side of a house. 1.3069 0.05217 101 73 25 3
1647 This is gonna be one hell of an inside pitch. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
1648 The song is “Take me OUT” to the ball game! 1.3068 0.05682 88 64 21 3
1649 Yes, hello, there are three strange men playing baseball in my living room. Are they w—? No they are not wearing masks 1.3048 0.05434 105 78 22 5
1650 Pretty wild day today, Jan.......they decided to play the championship in the living room. 1.3048 0.05263 105 77 24 4
1651 Yeah, we all tested negative so we're totally safe. 1.3048 0.05434 105 78 22 5
1652 Hello, Cable company?... I just love the in-home sports package... 1.3048 0.05918 105 81 16 8
1653 Well, at least the catcher is wearing a mask. 1.3048 0.05263 105 77 24 4
1654 if you guys aren’t busy we could use outfielders. The dining room is more than 6 feet away. 1.3039 0.04983 102 73 27 2
1655 Ellen? Ellen? if we’re not too late, after months of trying way too hard we finally have the perfect thing for your Socioeconomically Non-Threatening Family Makes The Relatable Viral Video We All Need Right Now segment. please god call me Ellen 1.3039 0.06040 102 79 15 8
1656 Sorry honey, but I have no idea why the Astros have a camera pointed at our living room... 1.3039 0.05709 102 77 19 6
1657 The pitch was more than just a little inside 1.3039 0.05358 102 75 23 4
1658 You can really feel the home field advantage here tonight. 1.3039 0.05709 102 77 19 6
1659 Remember when grampa took us to the movies to watch Edward Scissorhands and after we went to Wendy's? I miss him so much but I'm glad we made this baseball with his ashes. 1.3039 0.05877 102 78 17 7
1660 Yeah, I think the uniforms turned out pretty good. 1.3039 0.05709 102 77 19 6
1661 Gotta go, we're hosting the home opener. 1.3039 0.05536 102 76 21 5
1662 In my house, it’s not a homer unless it’s hit over the toilet paper. 1.3039 0.05358 102 75 23 4
1663 As a matter of fact, we do need new windows, but I think we're going to hold off for a bit. 1.3039 0.05358 102 75 23 4
1664 oh not much, just watching a ball game. 1.3039 0.05536 102 76 21 5
1665 Thank God it’s the bottom of the ninth. 1.3039 0.05877 102 78 17 7
1666 The sign? Split fingers to the face means watch out for the lamp! 1.3039 0.06040 102 79 15 8
1667 The good news is that they’re getting lots of father-son time, . . . 1.3039 0.05709 102 77 19 6
1668 No yeast yet, but I do have some batter. 1.3039 0.05709 102 77 19 6
1669 Can't talk to you right now Zelda, I'm covering third base. 1.3039 0.05174 102 74 25 3
1670 No spitting on my rug! Play ball! 1.3039 0.05877 102 78 17 7
1671 We can talk now; I’ve paused play. 1.3039 0.05709 102 77 19 6
1672 I don't care who he is, he's not getting past first base with me. 1.3039 0.05536 102 76 21 5
1673 I know, it's like you can order anything on the internet. 1.3039 0.04983 102 73 27 2
1674 Bobby, hit a stay at home run! 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1675 Home field advantage? Doubt that! 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
1676 Yes, he told me he bought a baseball experience that was quarantine friendly. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
1677 Yeah, still boring 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1678 Yes, I ordered the Yankees delivery, but you sent the Mets by mistake. 1.3030 0.05067 99 71 26 2
1679 Sorry, gotta hang up. I left the game on. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1680 Yeah, they’re prepping for the Zoom call. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1681 I don’t want to tell him to not play ball in the house. I’m not his mother. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1682 No, no! I said it’s pandemonium in here - not pandemic! 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
1683 I don't CARE if he has a no-hitter going - he's over his pitch count! 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
1684 ´It’s only 9am and they’re in the bottom of the 5th.’ 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
1685 I hate home games. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
1686 One more walk - bring in the left-hander. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
1687 Home runs don't count. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1688 Oh nothing,just hanging out with the boys. 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
1689 The lockdown? Oh no, we've kept to the same routine as always. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
1690 Yeah, except they're both the home team. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1691 Warm up the lefthander. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
1692 Clean your plate when you're done. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
1693 Do I bang the couch twice for curveball? 1.3030 0.05067 99 71 26 2
1694 Don’t worry. They’re wearing bedroom slippers and using a Nerf ball, but I can’t understand why they’re wearing baseball caps indoors. And I told them, “No Spitting,” or they’re out! 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1695 I don't think you'd be interested. It's inside baseball. 1.3030 0.05067 99 71 26 2
1696 I THOUGHT I REALLY MISSED LIVE BASEBALL! 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
1697 Never,in all the years I have been going to games,have I had such a great seat! 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1698 A relationship? Sort of - Chuck's on second and I'm third base. 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
1699 Now I really understand the term home game! 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
1700 Yes, I did say peanuts AND Cracker Jacks. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1701 His last time up to bat he grounded out to the ottoman 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
1702 The genie misheard my wish for a bold tall dame. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1703 Yes, I'd like to cancel the sports package, please. 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
1704 You said you'd give anything to have baseball back, right? 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1705 That's what I'm telling you, who's on first. 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
1706 I think it’s a home run. 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
1707 You might want to hang up and duck, Martha. 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
1708 Just imagine the ball is the Coronavirus Henry 1.3030 0.05824 99 75 18 6
1709 I'm scared, mom, they're going into extra innings and I'm third base. 1.3030 0.05067 99 71 26 2
1710 I can’t wait till one of them gets to third base! 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
1711 We don't do family outings anymore. It's all innings now. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1712 Can’t you do this over Zoom? 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1713 ...And Apartment 518 is left field, you should get good seats on the patio there... 1.3030 0.04859 99 70 28 1
1714 When they asked me if I supported the return to play proposal, I didn't think it involved my house... 1.3030 0.05998 99 76 16 7
1715 Wait! Who's on first?? 1.3030 0.05266 99 72 24 3
1716 Hold it; I got to get my mask on . I think the kid is going to throw a spitter. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1717 Well it certainly wasn’t the diamond I was hoping for. 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
1718 Hello Amazon? I want to return baseball. I want women's soccer. Could you send it before June 1st? 1.3030 0.05644 99 74 20 5
1719 I'm here with the play-by-play in the 5th inning of game 5 in the '77 World Series; Dodgers vs our Yankees. Mr. October, Reggie Jackson is at the plate. One on, two out. LA's pitcher, Elias Sosa has the ball... 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1720 Can you see me, I got a great seat on the third base line!! 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1721 Now I've no choice but to root, root, root, for the home team. 1.3030 0.04859 99 70 28 1
1722 It started with fantasy sports. Then the virus hit. 1.3030 0.05459 99 73 22 4
1723 I did say they should make baseball more accessible 1.3021 0.05155 96 69 25 2
1724 This quarantine's changing my concept of a Home Run. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
1725 The third amendment said nothing about baseball players 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
1726 My employer wants me to come back to the office but I’m playing hardball. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
1727 It’s actually really great except for all the spitting. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
1728 I don't think the bathroom was a smart place for third base. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
1729 Same as you...I only leave the house to chase foul balls. 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
1730 Yes I'd like a flight to one of those cities offering that mandatory self-quarantine package 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
1731 Well, we've got home field advantage. 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
1732 I know it's crazy but the hot dogs are so good!! 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
1733 They are enacting "Baseball in the time of COVID". 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
1734 Don't worry about the new windows, I gave him the bunt sign. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
1735 The boys finally found something to do. 1.3021 0.05946 96 73 17 6
1736 I should've never thrown out the Wii. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
1737 I believe that he confused it with home-based work. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
1738 They're practicing stealing signs while being quarantined. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
1739 I'm not kidding! They're streaming baseball... right now. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
1740 Tickets to home games are nonrefundable. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
1741 I really would not mind them if they would just give up the chewing tobacco, it just does not match the color scheme. 1.3021 0.05155 96 69 25 2
1742 Ya, Gary believes this is the way to get to second base with me. 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
1743 Commissioner, does the "infield fly" rule say anything about chandeliers? 1.3021 0.05364 96 70 23 3
1744 I think we may be taking this 'Stay At Home' rule a bit too far? 1.3021 0.05155 96 69 25 2
1745 Bring in the lefty from the bedroom. 1.3021 0.04938 96 68 27 1
1746 Yeah, c'mon over, we're a little short in the field. 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
1747 I need to call you back. The bullpen is on the other line. 1.3010 0.05314 103 76 23 4
1748 Harry said it was either this or competitive ax throwing. 1.3010 0.05490 103 77 21 5
1749 Hi Gretchen it’s Barbra. Listen, do you have any hydroxychloroquine or bleach? No it’s not that! It’s Frank’s game night and I need something to take the edge off 1.3000 0.05946 100 77 16 7
1750 He sure as hell isn't getting to third base tonight. 1.3000 0.05774 100 76 18 6
1751 I’m, yeah, no, I got everything I ordered except the hotdog guy... 1.3000 0.05222 100 73 24 3
1752 ‘ A simple game of rock, paper, scissors would have sufficed.’ 1.3000 0.05946 100 77 16 7
1753 Can he call you back? He's behind in the count. 1.3000 0.05596 100 75 20 5
1754 My name is Amelia Bedelia. 1.3000 0.05774 100 76 18 6
1755 Yup, they're still stupid. 1.3000 0.06113 100 78 14 8
1756 Do you want the play-by-play or the color? 1.3000 0.05774 100 76 18 6
1757 It's exciting! For three hours, they've done nothing but stare at each other. 1.3000 0.05774 100 76 18 6
1758 No—the cat’s on deck, not on the deck. 1.3000 0.05774 100 76 18 6
1759 Take me out to the ballgame...please! 1.3000 0.05412 100 74 22 4
1760 No, it's a doubleheader, I have time to talk. 1.3000 0.05946 100 77 16 7
1761 I know I promised I would ask, but he's likely to balk if I ask him to do it right now. 1.3000 0.05412 100 74 22 4
1762 They came to visit my sick boy for charity, but then Cuomo said shelter-in-place starts right now, so they stayed! 1.3000 0.05774 100 76 18 6
1763 The stay at home order is really getting on my nerves! 1.3000 0.05596 100 75 20 5
1764 Well, they don’t actually run the bases, they mainly spit, grunt and scratch. 1.3000 0.06113 100 78 14 8
1765 Oh, not much, just waiting for the acid to wear off. How about you? 1.3000 0.05774 100 76 18 6
1766 Tell your center-fielder he's too deep. This guy can barely reach the breakfast nook. 1.3000 0.06113 100 78 14 8
1767 Remember that ridiculous email I sent the commissioner of baseball to host the games during the pandemic? 1.3000 0.05774 100 76 18 6
1768 I feel bad for the New Yorker judges that are about to read the same “Home Run” pun over and over again 1.3000 0.05946 100 77 16 7
1769 Flattening the curveball. 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
1770 The new Fantasy Baseball App proved to be a little too realistic for Lisa. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
1771 I told him to pitch him inside but this is ridiculous. 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1772 Yeah, they tried a zoom game, but there was a delay 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1773 I’m just glad he’s not a NASCAR driver. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
1774 When he said he needed a pitcher I thought he meant margaritas 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
1775 Out? Out? I thought the ump said we'd all be safe at home. 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
1776 I got promoted to General Manager. 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
1777 I would like to unsubscribe to ESPN ExtraHD, no apartment reason 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1778 I'll call you back during the seventh-inning stretch. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
1779 The Astros are paying to see our Nest Cam footage. 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1780 Now is not a good time. The couches are loaded. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
1781 They call it "Safe at Home" 1.2990 0.05112 97 70 25 2
1782 The playoffs will be at Sheila's. 1.2990 0.05112 97 70 25 2
1783 I wouldn't have yelled "take it home" if I knew they'd take it literally. 1.2990 0.05892 97 74 17 6
1784 Yeah, the date is going great. Think we might get to third base. 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1785 Remember, no spitting in the house 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
1786 I thought you meant virtual baseball. 1.2990 0.06246 97 76 13 8
1787 Can't it wait until the seventh inning stretch? 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
1788 He's looking in for the sign . . . they're thinking curve ball. I'll call you back at the end of the inning. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
1789 I bought a baseball game. 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1790 They’re carrying bats and have facial hair. Hurry, they’re about to throw something at my son. Yes, he’s wearing a mask. 1.2990 0.06072 97 75 15 7
1791 And reporting to you live from behind third base. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
1792 All I know is that they said they needed a space for Spring training. 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1793 Don’t tell anybody but I think I have Aaron Judge in my living room. 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
1794 Oh nothing,whats happening at your place? 1.2990 0.05892 97 74 17 6
1795 Me and Jerry? He's still trying to get to first base. 1.2990 0.05892 97 74 17 6
1796 Just watching another episode of Sox and the City. 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
1797 At least he's not playing games with me anymore, is all I'm saying 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1798 High definition. Bring the game to your living room. 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
1799 No, I did not steal any signals! 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1800 You're right mom, these new tv's do bring the game right into the living room. 1.2990 0.05892 97 74 17 6
1801 At first, they wanted to play hockey. But I talked them out of it. 1.2990 0.06072 97 75 15 7
1802 I thought we were doing this baseball game over Zoom? 1.2990 0.05317 97 71 23 3
1803 This guy fucking walks. I've never been more certain of anything in my life. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
1804 Oh, for God’s sake, watch your stupid game! 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1805 Yes, maybe the men are suffering from sports withdrawal in lockdown . . . why do you ask? 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1806 I hate to say it, but at the end of the day, it is what it is. 1.2990 0.06072 97 75 15 7
1807 the crowd estimate today is 1 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1808 I knoe it's the only game in town but some men will do anything to score. 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1809 He'll call if he makes it home. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
1810 This whole ‘crowding Home’ thing is getting old 1.2990 0.05112 97 70 25 2
1811 Just a minute, I'll see if he's at home. 1.2990 0.05892 97 74 17 6
1812 ... and I told him, "three strikes and you're outta here!" 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1813 I've gotta go Mom: I'm up next. 1.2990 0.05516 97 72 21 4
1814 How do I know I'm hallucinating? Because the batter only has one boob. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
1815 This isn't the kind of ball-room I hoped for when marrying you 1.2976 0.05813 84 62 19 3
1816 He and I have very different ideas of how to get to third base. 1.2976 0.05813 84 62 19 3
1817 He wanted to flatten the curve at home but now there’s no movement to his breaking ball 1.2970 0.05548 101 76 20 5
1818 He liked to pitch inside” 1.2959 0.06017 98 76 15 7
1819 you can’t play ball in the house, they said. you can’t play ball outside with your friends, they said. and so they played ball with their quaranteam in quarantine 1.2959 0.05468 98 73 21 4
1820 not a great time to not having a backyard 1.2959 0.05468 98 73 21 4
1821 I’m glad the neighbours let us house sit again 1.2959 0.06017 98 76 15 7
1822 Even in Quarantine, Shelly made sure to remove the garbage can when the Astros practiced. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1823 Yes, yes, no one’s gone out yet, so we’re staying safe 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1824 How are the boys keeping busy at home? Playing with their bat and balls, what did you expect? 1.2959 0.05468 98 73 21 4
1825 Yeah, they’re even calling themselves the ‘Home Brewers’ 1.2959 0.05068 98 71 25 2
1826 I thought the offer was “3 red socks for 2” 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1827 Gotta go, I’m on deck. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1828 The catcher called for a high fast one -- inside. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1829 I’ve got season tickets 1.2959 0.05468 98 73 21 4
1830 The combination of performance enhancing drugs and hydroxychloroquine is having unintended side effects. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1831 He's at home, but I'm not sure for how long. 1.2959 0.05068 98 71 25 2
1832 Seventh inning 6 -3, Covid vs Flu 1.2959 0.05272 98 72 23 3
1833 OK, he twitched his nose. It's gonna be a slider. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1834 All I can say is, God help us if we're still in quarantine by football season... 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1835 Well mom, it's better than the NASCAR they tried yesterday. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1836 Hi, I called you yesterday about getting some baseboard installed in my Living Room. 1.2959 0.06017 98 76 15 7
1837 Dave might have misunderstood the safe-at-home order. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1838 It’s the bottom of the ninth and the windows are still intact. 1.2959 0.06190 98 77 13 8
1839 I'll talk to you later, Jules. It looks like I'm too close to call. 1.2959 0.05272 98 72 23 3
1840 I gotta go-- The vases are loaded! 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1841 What do you mean, who's on first? 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1842 Remember, the spitter's outlawed. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1843 I'll call you back later; the game is on at my place. 1.2959 0.05468 98 73 21 4
1844 No, no the other American pastime 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1845 It's a home game, so I have a great seat. 1.2959 0.06190 98 77 13 8
1846 When you asked if I would "play ball" with you, I thought you had something else in mind. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1847 I don’t know about the Astros, but I’m close to taking my husband’s ring away. 1.2959 0.06017 98 76 15 7
1848 I'd like to return the pitcher I ordered, please. The photo was very misleading 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1849 I told Henry, three strikes and he's outa here for good. 1.2959 0.05272 98 72 23 3
1850 Guys, "inside baseball" is a slang generic expression that I'm speculating you have never heard before. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1851 30 years from now, will anyone get this year's abundance of quarantine humor? 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1852 I win a steak if he hits the grandfather clock. 1.2959 0.06017 98 76 15 7
1853 All his pitches are just a bit inside. 1.2959 0.04856 98 70 27 1
1854 The open concept is great for baseball, but why is Carlos Beltran banging on our kitchen trash. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1855 Gotta go, Helen. I'm on deck. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1856 Hold on a sec -- I want to get a hot dog. 1.2959 0.06357 98 78 11 9
1857 Yes, this is the manager of the home team. 1.2959 0.05468 98 73 21 4
1858 Oh, same old, same old. How about you? 1.2959 0.05272 98 72 23 3
1859 Somebody isn’t getting to third base. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1860 As a matter of fact, I AM in left field. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1861 I need a break, Karen. The boys have another home game today. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1862 Bottom of the 9th. The cushions are loaded. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1863 The game is going fine, but the "wave" is a little underwhelming. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1864 Well, at least you don't have to quarantine with the Cincinnati Reds, Brenda. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1865 Our pitcher used to be just to pour water from 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1866 Yeah the guys are surviving without watching sports, but I'm not sure the house will make it. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1867 Worse yet, Mom, they expected me to be the umpire. 1.2959 0.05272 98 72 23 3
1868 We're staying inside but Stan says he's tired of the board games. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1869 Get both lefties up in the garage. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1870 No, they didn't even bring peanuts or cracker jack. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1871 Can I call you later? I'm in the middle of a game 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1872 I'll say this lockdown is frustrating. Here I am in scoring position, and no one has made it to first base. 1.2959 0.06017 98 76 15 7
1873 Opening Day, Major League Baseball, 2020 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1874 It's the bottom of the ninth inning, The home team has two outs, with a man at the dining room table, and man at the armoire. Kowalski needs a home run to make the winning score. 1.2959 0.05068 98 71 25 2
1875 OK so far, no hits, no spits. 1.2959 0.06017 98 76 15 7
1876 I wouldn't go to the stadium, so they came here. 1.2959 0.05468 98 73 21 4
1877 Won't be able to make it, I'm afraid. I'm in a pitch meeting. 1.2959 0.05468 98 73 21 4
1878 The guys started it because they really miss baseball, but the good news is that ESPN has offered to broadcast the games. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1879 Honey, did you upgrade our cable package again? 1.2947 0.05772 95 72 18 5
1880 I’ve seen enough balls flying around for a lifetime! 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1881 Hi Barbara, I'm just calling to touch base. 1.2947 0.04935 95 68 26 1
1882 The neighbors are here, their first visit of the season. My husband felt comfortable enough... There's the pitch! Low and outside! 3 and 0 in the first inning and again, this is the first time he felt comfortable enough to invite em over, we've been talking outside and... 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1883 Yeah the boys were so bored they started playing baseball in the house. On the bright side every hit is a home run. 1.2947 0.05772 95 72 18 5
1884 2025: I guess they weren’t kidding about sports never being the same after Coronavirus. 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1885 Vase-ball anyone? 1.2947 0.05962 95 73 16 6
1886 Can't stand these home runs anymore. 1.2947 0.05962 95 73 16 6
1887 It’s really not as fun as you’d think. 1.2947 0.05772 95 72 18 5
1888 Yeah it looks like they’re hoping for a home field advantage 1.2947 0.05157 95 69 24 2
1889 Is it a six or they're just playing 6 feet apart? 1.2947 0.06147 95 74 14 7
1890 This isn’t what I meant when I said ‘inside baseball.’ 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1891 Well at least the beer is affordable. 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1892 Dad was upset losing the baseball season, but totally lost it when he heard about the hot-dog shortage 1.2947 0.06147 95 74 14 7
1893 ESPN just offered 100K for a live feed. 1.2947 0.05962 95 73 16 6
1894 I hate it when we're the home team. 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1895 They always play better at home 1.2947 0.06147 95 74 14 7
1896 It’s pretty boring. Even Elvis can’t leave the building. 1.2947 0.06147 95 74 14 7
1897 No Steinbrenner, I don't think this is going to work as a long term arrangement. 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1898 Strike three, and you do the dishes, Adam. 1.2947 0.05772 95 72 18 5
1899 Delivery is way better than curbside. 1.2947 0.05772 95 72 18 5
1900 Putting an end to the does-it-come-from-bats debate. Poor Gus pulled the short straw. 1.2947 0.06147 95 74 14 7
1901 Let’s not play two. 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1902 They keep saying that we have the home-field advantage, but I'm not so sure. 1.2947 0.05772 95 72 18 5
1903 I just called for a bunt but these are uncertain times. 1.2947 0.06147 95 74 14 7
1904 ...Apparently, it's some sort of fantasy baseball league. 1.2947 0.06147 95 74 14 7
1905 Must throw low and outside because of social distancing. 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1906 I have to run. We're about to break a lamp. 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1907 Get the bullpen ready. He's been throwing for 2 months and he's starting to tire out. 1.2947 0.04935 95 68 26 1
1908 Joey's using the wall mirror at 2nd base to steal signs... 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1909 I'd like a chili dog, diet Coke, two table lamps, and a mirror, please. 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1910 Apparently, we have home field advantage. 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1911 I'm going to need some relief. 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1912 Fred's fantasy league is hell on the windows... 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1913 I think it’s the bottom of the 999th. What’s happening over at your house, Linda? 1.2947 0.05772 95 72 18 5
1914 Welcome to the work from home-run derby 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1915 Finally got to third base with the guy I’m dating. 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1916 It's the bottom of the ninth. The windows are losing. 1.2947 0.05772 95 72 18 5
1917 You gotta come by, it’s better than 4K. 1.2947 0.05157 95 69 24 2
1918 It's not the damage they're making that's bothering me, it's the plays. 1.2947 0.05772 95 72 18 5
1919 I got the home game package. 1.2947 0.05157 95 69 24 2
1920 Yes, an expansion. I'm thinking sixty feet, six inches. 1.2947 0.05157 95 69 24 2
1921 I love my chances of catching a foul ball. 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1922 None of these guys are gonna get to third base. 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1923 Belter in place 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1924 No one is trying to sleep with me. I told you, they like baseball. 1.2941 0.06223 85 65 15 5
1925 Yep, I ordered bundt batter, not a bunt batter. 1.2941 0.05993 85 64 17 4
1926 He can’t hit an inside pitch 1.2941 0.05755 85 63 19 3
1927 No. Just me, and I got a great seat 1.2941 0.05755 85 63 19 3
1928 The home team is winning. 1.2941 0.05993 85 64 17 4
1929 There’ve been discussions on lowering mound height again, but this is getting ridiculous. 1.2929 0.05227 99 73 23 3
1930 ‘Honey, COVID’s not so bad when the bat comes to you.’ 1.2929 0.05607 99 75 19 5
1931 Good fastball, but slider is always in the rug. 1.2929 0.04922 99 74 22 3
1932 It’s them not wearing masks that really bugs me. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1933 No, you wouldn’t understand. It’s inside baseball. 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1934 I've got the best seats in the house 1.2917 0.04893 96 69 26 1
1935 Where covid and baseball meet: safe at home. 1.2917 0.05112 96 70 24 2
1936 Waiter, there’s an infield fly in my soup 1.2917 0.06091 96 75 14 7
1937 Finally a call to the bullpen seeking some sort of relief 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1938 Then he wanted the organist too and, well, enough is enough! 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1939 I invited some of his friends over to help him get to first base 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1940 This wasn’t what I was envisioning when you said we were going to see the home opener soon! 1.2917 0.05112 96 70 24 2
1941 Can I have him call you back? He's out on the veranda, announcing the game to the neighbors. 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1942 Come on over we are having a ball! 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1943 I need a delivery-4 beers- 2 dogs hold the mustard and a bag of nuts!s 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1944 Uncle Jerry says send it to the short stop. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1945 Be careful not to hit the old bat. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
1946 Only his name is Babe Ruth 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1947 ....and I just witnessed an inside the room home run. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1948 Us? Oh, ya know -- same old, same old. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
1949 Use your indoor voices, please. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
1950 Two fingers down. It's a fastball 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1951 It's the bottom of the 237th. Who knows when it'll end. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1952 I swear if he breaks another lamp, I’m benching him. 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1953 Jimmy, this cat is meowing every time I signal for a fastball. 1.2917 0.06091 96 75 14 7
1954 No Ma. What's up and Who's on first. We are ahead. 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1955 Wanna come over and watch the baseball game? 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1956 Guys, I hate to say this, but the quarantine and the lock-down ended yesterday. 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1957 We ran out of puzzles. 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1958 They decided to schedule a home game. 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1959 hm!? basically... they’ve gone batty. 1.2917 0.06091 96 75 14 7
1960 It's a new symptom... 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1961 It’s true what they say about baseball...it IS a game of inches. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1962 Next week you can host 1.2917 0.05112 96 70 24 2
1963 Best seat I've ever had at a baseball game. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1964 Summer Sports 2020 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1965 Yeah, indoor training is great actually. Oliver makes sure they master proper posture before they can move on to other skills. 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1966 Well, I've been furloughed, but thankfully Kevin and his team are able to Work From Home. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1967 It's the top of the 7th, 2 on base, and Bucky ####ing Dent is up to bat. 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1968 Well he is keeping six feet away from the pitcher, so I feel bad complaining. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
1969 He can hit a triple,but still only get to first base. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
1970 Tomorrow we play next door. Then we go across the street 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1971 Sure, come on over--we can watch a game together. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
1972 This is so cool. The MLB said each member of the fan base can have one inning in their home. 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1973 I'd invite you over but only one of them is wearing a mask. 1.2917 0.05112 96 70 24 2
1974 Can I call you back. It’s tied at the bottom of the ninth. 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1975 Today, we’re playing living room baseball and I’m “the crowd goes wild”. 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1976 I'm third base. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1977 Cat’s stealing the signals. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1978 Bill, Stretch and Banana Boy are over here re-living their glory days ! 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1979 how come i can never just get the home invaders who murder my entire family and leave our bodies as a ghoulish message holding a mirror up to society? 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1980 I gotta hang up. Tabby's trying to steal home. 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1981 He's a player allright, but he won't get to first base with me! 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1982 No you guys; innings and outings are not opposites. 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1983 I built it and they came. Now what? 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1984 My Date? He got to third base!! 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1985 I fail to see ANY Home-field advantage 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1986 They told us to “Go big or go home”... so we did. 1.2917 0.05112 96 70 24 2
1987 Hold on a sec; it’s the final pitch and I’m playing shortstop! 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1988 Your Virtual Reality toy is freaking out the cat. How do I switch it to ballet? 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1989 No, doctor, it's not exactly cabin fever. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1990 Can you keep it down and to the outside, please? 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1991 The commissioner's reopening the league for home games. 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
1992 Who's on first? I'm not sure. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
1993 Can you believe it, Rhonda? I got the best seat in the house! 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1994 When they said they wanted to "play through", I thought they meant golf. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1995 It definitely can't be a home game for BOTH teams, right? 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
1996 I'll call you back. The game is really close. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1997 Strike 3, you can't go out 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
1998 Yes, four hotdogs and four beers. 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1999 Yes, I'm still bored as hell. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
2000 What can I tell you-I missed sports TV! 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
2001 Karen didn't know what she was getting herself into when she downloaded the MLB At Home app 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
2002 He was safe at home 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
2003 The Astros manager wants to know what two fingers means? 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
2004 Oh well. We’ll get ‘em next pandemic. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
2005 Can't talk right now. I'm coaching third base, and there's a runner on second. 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
2006 I’’m hoping he makes it to third base with me on the couch. 1.2917 0.04893 96 69 26 1
2007 We put the fun in dysfunctional family room.” 1.2917 0.05908 96 74 16 6
2008 I have my own Safe at Home plan." 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
2009 It felt much better being this close when there was a net in front of me! 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
2010 Yes doctor, I am sleeping better, but there are some side effects. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
2011 Without baseball , the lockdown is driving us all batty. 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
2012 The apartment is great, and it's right near the ballpark. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
2013 Warm up the closer. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
2014 Oh, nothing much, just watching the ballgame 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
2015 ...and you're saying people everywhere are being struck down and it's all because of a bat? I mean...really Mabel...just listen to yourself..." 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
2016 Commissioner says they're coming to your house next. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
2017 There is a difference between "a bat in a bowl" and "a bat and a ball" 1.2903 0.05838 93 71 17 5
2018 Where’s Amelia Bedelia to steal home plate when you need her... 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2019 Every run's a home run now 1.2903 0.06035 93 72 15 6
2020 You sure the bat caused this lockdown? 1.2903 0.06035 93 72 15 6
2021 It's the bottom of the 73rd inning and they are still stuck at home. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2022 I'm glad baseball's back, but these home games can be a pain. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2023 Hold on a sec. I need to pinch hit a lefty. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2024 OK, cue in the "ZOOM" - it's finally the bottom of the ninth! 1.2903 0.04973 93 67 25 1
2025 Any run is really a Home run 1.2903 0.05838 93 71 17 5
2026 Even the cat is bored. 1.2903 0.06226 93 73 13 7
2027 I am playing--I'm their third-base coach. 1.2903 0.05838 93 71 17 5
2028 Suzie, you called at a great time. Championship game for Mudville. Bottom of the ninth. Tie score. Two outs. Casey at bat. Three-and-two, the big one's due .... 1.2903 0.06226 93 73 13 7
2029 I’d like to order some peanuts and crackerjacks. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2030 I'm so glad things are getting back to normal 1.2903 0.05423 93 69 21 3
2031 Don't worry, the boys are all safe at home. 1.2903 0.06035 93 72 15 6
2032 Mom, I know your crystal collection is in danger, but I can't stop him now - it's a full count! 1.2903 0.05838 93 71 17 5
2033 Can't talk now! Top of the 9th! Two out! 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2034 Inside baseball is not so dull after all. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2035 No, I ordered red socks! 1.2903 0.06226 93 73 13 7
2036 I'm just saying, it's no field of dreams for me. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2037 You sent the wrong item, I just wanted a pair of red socks for my feet... No returns?! 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2038 Sounds good, we’ll touch base soon. 1.2903 0.06035 93 72 15 6
2039 Oh it's been an adjustment having them all home all day.. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2040 Yeah, the bases aren’t the only things that are loaded 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2041 I'll call you back in the seventh. 1.2903 0.05423 93 69 21 3
2042 The season ticket prices are really cheap. 1.2903 0.05634 93 70 19 4
2043 Yeah, the home team is playing the at-home team. Not sure who to root for. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
2044 Boys, you’ll have to wait a minute. The shortstop’s daughter just lost a tooth and we lost video connection with the left fielder. 1.2887 0.05668 97 74 18 5
2045 Covid schmovid, shouldn't they be sixty feet apart? 1.2887 0.05276 97 72 22 3
2046 Home base looks a lot different than it used to 1.2881 0.06860 59 44 13 2
2047 only in new york, baby 1.2872 0.05374 94 70 21 3
2048 Let’s zoom tomorrow, it’s a doubleheader. 1.2872 0.05583 94 71 19 4
2049 I can’t talk right now, he is about to hit a homerun 1.2872 0.05978 94 73 15 6
2050 Even so, it still gets boring without any offense 1.2872 0.05583 94 71 19 4
2051 Corona Up 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
2052 Not looking forward to hockey season. 1.2872 0.05583 94 71 19 4
2053 Yes, please. A hot dog with kraut and mustard. And a Diet Coke. 1.2872 0.05157 94 69 23 2
2054 Yeah Trish, they’re having a real slugfest over here... 1.2872 0.05583 94 71 19 4
2055 Could you send up a pitcher....anything but corona 1.2872 0.05583 94 71 19 4
2056 Why are you so shocked. You know we do this everyday! 1.2872 0.05374 94 70 21 3
2057 I'm here to enforce the No Spitting rule. 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
2058 Gotta go, I'm up next. 1.2872 0.05374 94 70 21 3
2059 Fortunately Henry is throwing a No-hitter! 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
2060 Remember Roy, first base is in the kitchen! 1.2872 0.05978 94 73 15 6
2061 Best seat in the house; game seven; bottom of the ninth; two outs; bases loaded; count 3 and two and here comes the pitch... 1.2872 0.05157 94 69 23 2
2062 Take the ball game out to me. 1.2872 0.05978 94 73 15 6
2063 Um, who's going to field the ball? 1.2872 0.05157 94 69 23 2
2064 Why yes. Season tickets are available along the third base line. 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
2065 Well sure I miss baseball, but it's not like I'm having hallucinations...oh come on,THAT WAS A STRIKE!...sorry, what were you saying? 1.2872 0.05157 94 69 23 2
2066 The good news is that I nailed the National Anthem. 1.2872 0.06167 94 74 13 7
2067 Yes of course I'm high and inside. Why do you ask? 1.2872 0.06167 94 74 13 7
2068 Yes, we're having sliders for dinner. 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
2069 Hello Pottery Barn. Do you have curbside pickup? 1.2872 0.05978 94 73 15 6
2070 Yes, what kind of bats do you exterminate? 1.2872 0.05978 94 73 15 6
2071 No, we haven't reached first base yet. 1.2872 0.05374 94 70 21 3
2072 You won’t BELIEVE what the Mets did this time. 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
2073 Keep it low and inside Larry he’ll never hit that and save our windows one more time 1.2872 0.04930 94 68 25 1
2074 I think they misunderstood me when I said I wanted my new place to feel like "home base." 1.2872 0.05978 94 73 15 6
2075 You might say 'We're having a ball!' 1.2872 0.05583 94 71 19 4
2076 What do you mean, who's on third? 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
2077 Well, duck this time then. 1.2872 0.05978 94 73 15 6
2078 Oh, Dad and the kids are fine. They're just playing some shelter-in-place baseball. 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
2079 How's your French going? I am trying to pick up baseball and it's really slow 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
2080 Being third base isn't so bad. The poor cat is home plate. 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
2081 Is it opening day there too? I’ve been trying not to catch anything. 1.2857 0.06110 91 71 14 6
2082 Yes, Chester Meowington is an excellent umpire. 1.2857 0.06110 91 71 14 6
2083 Then I said it’s only a homer if it’s more than 6 feet. 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2084 When you said you had a pitch meeting, this wasn't what I had in mind 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2085 No more away games...The rest of our games are at home. 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2086 The new nosebleed seats 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2087 Mom always said not to play ball in the house! 1.2857 0.06306 91 72 12 7
2088 ESPN? Yes, I’d like to submit a livestream 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2089 I thought we agreed on not letting the kids hit and steal? 1.2857 0.05250 91 67 22 2
2090 The pitcher is always the coach’s son. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2091 He needs to develop a third pitch fast or we won’t have any windows left. 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2092 He’s OUT!” “Um.. ok... can you have him call me when he gets home? 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2093 I just hit a triple... they have me calling balls and strikes and the hot dogs are simmering. 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2094 Things are pretty good here, Fran. We're in the 7th inning and not one window broken. 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2095 He's at bat now, but he'll never get to first base with me! 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2096 Unless he bunts,I have time to talk. 1.2857 0.06306 91 72 12 7
2097 Can't talk. It's the top of the first. 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2098 I'll have to get back to you. The game's on. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2099 Hi Mom, exciting news--I just hit a home run! 1.2857 0.06110 91 71 14 6
2100 Off her medicine, Valeri believes hand waving will make her visions go away. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2101 Yes, its a home game 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2102 Listen, Hon, I have to go. I'm third base. 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2103 Honey, I got a seat right by home plate! 1.2857 0.05761 84 63 18 3
2104 I only watch the home games. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2105 Yada, yada, yada 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2106 Yes, you could say they're 'safe at home.' 1.2857 0.05012 91 66 24 1
2107 Throw it inside. 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2108 When you said getting to first base, this isn’t what I had in mind 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2109 No, there aren’t any bases. EVERYTHING is home. 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2110 - boy the 5G TV looks very realistic -can I call you right back, the cat needs to use the pitcher's mound again -that's one way to spend my pandemic PPP loan -hold on I think the brownies are kicking in 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2111 Watching COVID Baseball, you? 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2112 It's a home game, not a house game. OUT! 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2113 Are you sure? I have great seats. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2114 Virus or no virus, Dad and my brothers refuse to miss the season. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2115 The playing is fine. It's the spitting that's the problem. 1.2857 0.06110 91 71 14 6
2116 I never thought I would get to a ballroom, but thanks to the pandemic here I am! 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2117 We have great seats but I much prefer the away games. 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2118 Finally, something decent to bet on. 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2119 I need to stop answering swingers ads in Sports Illustrated.” 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2120 Balk! You're closer than 6 feet 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2121 That’s right Emily, tonight’s home game is not being televised. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2122 I'm watching the shutter in home league game 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2123 They lived in the basement for two weeks beforehand, so, yea I feel pretty good about it! 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2124 No, Mildred, they're no longer bowling in the living room. 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2125 Peter at-bat. He has a long way to go if he wants to catch up to John’s two broken windows, one injured cat and a shattered fishbowl after a spectacular Baltimore Chop 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2126 I’ll get back to you, I’m on another call 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2127 My husband is out in left field. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2128 Yeah it's great being so close to the action, but the cleats are hard on the carpet." 1.2857 0.05906 91 70 16 5
2129 Can I call you back? It's bottom of the ninth. 1.2857 0.06110 91 71 14 6
2130 batter, batter, batter, batter. . . ! 1.2857 0.06110 91 71 14 6
2131 Trust me, none of these guys is making it to third base. 1.2857 0.05761 84 63 18 3
2132 'There's a relief in the bathroom, a ground out in the back yard, and a man caught stealing my jewelry in the bedroom.' 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2133 I'll have to call you back. The catcher just flashed the bunt sign. 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
2134 He's been working from home and staying on the ball. 1.2857 0.05477 91 68 20 3
2135 Can't talk now, Mom, I'm a loaded base. 1.2842 0.05731 95 73 17 5
2136 Can the lefty warming in the den throw it in his kitchen? 1.2842 0.05532 95 72 19 4
2137 Can you believe it? Only of them is wearing a mask. 1.2841 0.05587 88 66 19 3
2138 Oh no I can talk. They’re not very good at the game. 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2139 The picture on this TV is just incredible. It’s like they’re playing right in my living room! 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2140 This is not what I expected when you said Fantasy Baseball 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
2141 I'll save you a seat in the front row next to the home dugout. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2142 It’s gonna be long season 1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
2143 I think I might be having a stroke... 1.2826 0.06245 92 73 12 7
2144 Not what I meant by third base 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
2145 They’re driving me batty. 1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
2146 Yeah, I am just waiting for the 7th-inning stretch to preheat the oven 1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
2147 I would rather have people play baseball in my living room than be alone a minute longer! 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2148 Ballroom, ballpark, same difference! 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
2149 I'm wearing this because I don't want to catch anything. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2150 Folks, we're in the bottom of the 9th inning of the Social Distancing finals. The score is 12,876 to 12,877!  Could it be more exciting than this!!!!!" 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2151 He’s been playing hardball ever since I filed for divorce. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2152 No windows were harmed in the making of this cartoon. 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2153 P.E. is not on today's schedule. Please work on your math questions. 1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
2154 I can’t wait until the next away game. 1.2826 0.04967 92 67 24 1
2155 I'll worry about windows when his batting average is above 200. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2156 It's a very close game. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2157 I'm watching the Narrow World of Sports. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2158 You really know how to get to first base with a girl, don't you? 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
2159 Get in here Bob! Your Zoom call 3-D baseball season just started, and its just like being here! 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2160 Yes we're fine. Since Dan is stuck at home so much he started working on our remodeling project. 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2161 I have a front row seat if you are interested. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2162 I built it and they came. Now how do I get them to leave? 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2163 Oh, just watching the game! 1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
2164 Uh...how about bunting it? 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
2165 Modern Family is a rerun, so I'm watching baseball. 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2166 I am the designated cleaner 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2167 I get his missing sports, but it will be a real mess if he doesn't strike out. 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2168 They already demolished the vases you hated, Mom. Anything else you want me to put near second base? 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2169 Careful Jimmy, he’s crowding home! 1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
2170 Yeah, it's crazy. Really strange. I just finished singing "Take Me In To The Ball Game". 1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
2171 All right, I've got you down for $100 on the Living Room Lions. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2172 Not quite social distancing, but one of them is wearing a mask." 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2173 My order was supposed to include face masks. 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2174 My suggestion was checkers. 1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
2175 it's weird, even the innings seem longer these days 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2176 I can’t talk now, Mom. I’m multi-tasking for our at-home series — I’m the ump, the announcer, the ball girl, and I have the bucket of Gatorade ready to pour over the winning team. 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
2177 They're going to play 60 million games, one spectator at a time. 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
2178 Can you stay that way for nine innings 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2179 It's no worse than watching football in a dome. 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2180 Got to call you back we're in the bottom of the ninth. 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2181 Can’t talk for long, I’m third base. 1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
2182 I can't wait until they plan an away game. 1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
2183 I said 60 feet apart. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2184 I meant cake batter!!! 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2185 I'd like to order another 2 dozen baseballs. And some window glass. 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2186 Its O.K.,Mom. They can't see a thing because their hats cover their eyes. 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2187 I just needed a release from the unimaginable stress I’ve been under for the last three months. I’m calling them the TriBeCa Tigers. 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
2188 IKEA? I'd like to order half a dozen more lamps. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2189 Another day calling balls and strikes with the home team. You 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2190 No, no not on TV, the Yankees are playing the Mets right here in my living room. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2191 It's at an alternative venue - but I got great seats. 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2192 Houston, I have their pitch signs. 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2193 I told Rob to bring home a bunt. Now we’ve got nothing for dessert. 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2194 I think you’re taking home game a bit too literally. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2195 Three strikes - and I'm out! 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2196 They spit, I kill 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
2197 He gave me a shelter in place diamond. 1.2826 0.05850 92 71 16 5
2198 It’s been a tough couple of months, but I think we’re only in the third inning. 1.2826 0.05426 92 69 20 3
2199 Hey! The cat is stealing signs. 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
2200 And Joe has really been able to work on his bunt. 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
2201 Scouts say his spitball has a wicked viral load 1.2824 0.05452 85 63 20 2
2202 Dad is pitching and the tying run is a the dining room table. 1.2824 0.06398 85 67 12 6
2203 Yes mom, I told them the rug wasn’t regulation length. 1.2824 0.05703 85 64 18 3
2204 Is the Southpaw warm in the kitchen? 1.2824 0.05452 85 63 20 2
2205 What can I say... they stole home. 1.2809 0.05297 89 66 21 2
2206 When I said you can't play in the park anymore, this is not what I meant! 1.2809 0.05533 89 67 19 3
2207 I'm safe at home.. thanks for asking. 1.2809 0.05297 89 66 21 2
2208 everything hits a little bit close to home in quarantine 1.2809 0.05533 89 67 19 3
2209 „Honestly Karen, I wish they‘d go back to staring at their phone screens all day.“ 1.2809 0.05759 89 68 17 4
2210 Hi Hon, it’s Mom. Bring in the lefty, Dad can’t find the plate. 1.2809 0.05759 89 68 17 4
2211 killing field 1.2809 0.06390 89 71 11 7
2212 Just thought I’d touch base. 1.2809 0.06187 89 70 13 6
2213 Only the catcher got a mask . . . 1.2809 0.05297 89 66 21 2
2214 They're playing at home tonight. Away games are on the back porch. 1.2809 0.05533 89 67 19 3
2215 My son says they have home field advantage. 1.2809 0.05759 89 68 17 4
2216 I'm getting this may become a thing. 1.2809 0.05759 89 68 17 4
2217 They say they won't play outside until Ace flattens his curve. 1.2809 0.05977 89 69 15 5
2218 I could live with the 6 a.m. practices, and the beer and hot dogs at every meal...but now he's threatening to send me down to Scranton. 1.2809 0.06390 89 71 11 7
2219 The home team is up one broken vase. 1.2809 0.05297 89 66 21 2
2220 Yeah, the boys are managing to stay occupied during the stay at home order. It has cost us a few lamps and windows, but after all, it is baseball season. 1.2809 0.05297 89 66 21 2
2221 I have this sudden craving for Bundt cake. 1.2809 0.06187 89 70 13 6
2222 „Maggie, you forgot to bring us some beer from the fridge on second.“ 1.2809 0.06187 89 70 13 6
2223 Hey, kids! Your game has gone viral--over 22 million people are watching. 1.2809 0.05977 89 69 15 5
2224 I'd swear in the Old Times this was played in a bigger space 1.2809 0.06187 89 70 13 6
2225 I'm worried about his breaking stuff." 1.2809 0.05759 89 68 17 4
2226 I know this can’t be right, only the catcher is wearing a mask. 1.2809 0.05297 89 66 21 2
2227 He says he won't go home until he hits it out of the house. 1.2809 0.05759 89 68 17 4
2228 Can he hit? 1.2809 0.05297 89 66 21 2
2229 Quarantine? - well, he hasn't exactly accepted it. 1.2809 0.05297 89 66 21 2
2230 I'm just glad they made the "No Spitting" rule. 1.2809 0.06187 89 70 13 6
2231 I told them this isn’t what home field advantage means 1.2796 0.05376 93 70 20 3
2232 Play from home they said. 1.2796 0.05993 93 73 14 6
2233 If your home run breaks anything in the house, it'll be counted as a strike 1.2796 0.05795 93 72 16 5
2234 Work from home 1.2796 0.05590 93 71 18 4
2235 they say you’re safer watching at home than at the stadium 1.2796 0.05154 93 69 22 2
2236 another swing and a miss, just like those dating apps, eh son? 1.2796 0.05154 93 69 22 2
2237 Isn't this taking "home base" a little bit too far? 1.2796 0.05590 93 71 18 4
2238 Come on over. It’s almost time for the 7th inning stretch. Can you bring me a dog and a beer? 1.2796 0.05376 93 70 20 3
2239 If you don't mind, family, I'd prefer if you rephrase that previous saying to something other than, "Knock that apple right through the window for a home run!" 1.2796 0.05590 93 71 18 4
2240 No, don’t hang up! I’m talking about actual inside-baseball! 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2241 Well the sourdough starter didn’t take off so we moved onto something else. 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2242 These seats are great 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2243 You can’t know how good it looks in HD until you see for yourself 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2244 Baseballantine 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2245 (Cat bangs trash can) 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2246 Hello, Grubhub? I need a hot dog, a bag of peanuts, and a beer. 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2247 At least they’re not banging trash cans. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2248 Socially distant outfielder 1.2778 0.05918 90 70 15 5
2249 The Living Room: Where every run is a home run. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2250 I don’t think my husband’s understanding of the new normal is very normal 1.2778 0.06126 90 71 13 6
2251 No we’re good. Just watching a game. 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2252 He just hit a grand slam into the chandelier 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2253 Uneventful game so far, but I keep thinking one of my favorite vases is bound to get broken. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2254 Just return the plate when you're done. 1.2778 0.06126 90 71 13 6
2255 It’s the top of the 9th and we’re losing by 1, but Fluffy’s on 3rd with nobody out. 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2256 It’s the bottom of the ninth and the winning run is in the kitchen. 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2257 The boys are taking the “stay at home order” too seriously; they could go outside. Thanks Obama 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2258 The body odor alone is intoxicating 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2259 I just told him to run home for a minute. 1.2778 0.06126 90 71 13 6
2260 They are already planning the football season. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2261 Your updated fantasy baseball package arrived. But I am not sure these are the players you ordered . 1.2778 0.05918 90 70 15 5
2262 We’re in the bottom of the second and down almost a hundred thousand. How about you? 1.2778 0.05918 90 70 15 5
2263 ...and then one of them tried to get to third base with me. 1.2778 0.05918 90 70 15 5
2264 I'm waiting for the hot dog vendor. 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2265 Ice hockey in your dining room? I'll be over in a minute. 1.2778 0.05247 90 67 21 2
2266 I told him, if he wants to get to first base, he's gotta earn it. 1.2778 0.06326 90 72 11 7
2267 Dad’s asking if you’re home or away. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2268 No, things are surprisingly normal! 1.2778 0.06126 90 71 13 6
2269 On the other hand, you can really hear the crack of the bat. 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2270 It's two-out bottom of the ninth. Runners are going, the count is 3 and two. How are the kids? 1.2778 0.05918 90 70 15 5
2271 Aw honey, what makes you think I don't like that lamp your mother got us? 1.2778 0.05918 90 70 15 5
2272 Next week they're playing on the road. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2273 I'm safe. They've all promised to bunt. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2274 I don't know, Mom. George planted corn in his COVID garden and they just showed up. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2275 Can we take this outside, gentlemen? 1.2778 0.05918 90 70 15 5
2276 Yes, that's right Mr. Steinbrenner... they'll be ready the moment we get the word. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2277 Why is she giving me the "bunt" sign on every pitch? 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2278 All home games and first base in the bathroom. It’s getting ugly. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2279 We can keep talking, Fran; this right-handed batter tends to hit to the opposite field. 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2280 Just wondering what they'll do for the seventh inning stretch. 1.2778 0.04748 90 65 25 0
2281 The date is going terribly. He won't even get to first base. 1.2778 0.05918 90 70 15 5
2282 He is working from home, and also working the count 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2283 Yes, he's wearing a mask, but he's was short on his social distance! 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2284 No they’re not “stealing home”. They’re stealing MY home! 1.2778 0.05703 90 69 17 4
2285 Just watching quarantine hologramball, you? 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2286 I just wish they had ended the quarantine before starting the baseball season. 1.2778 0.05480 90 68 19 3
2287 You won't believe where I'm sitting! 1.2778 0.05247 90 67 21 2
2288 Was able to grab a field-level seat right before game time 1.2759 0.05089 87 64 22 1
2289 When I told you to bring it home - this isn't what I meant. 1.2759 0.06049 87 68 14 5
2290 Yeah, I gotta go. We had a pickle earlier with a pea that was really more like cheese. Now I got a Baltimore chop in the oven and it’s almost time for my 7th inning stretch. 1.2759 0.06266 87 69 12 6
2291 Sorry, but I can't hear you over the trash cans banging. 1.2759 0.06049 87 68 14 5
2292 Yeah, I think you could say they miss it." 1.2759 0.05590 87 66 18 3
2293 I'm sheltering at home. Well, next to home. 1.2759 0.06049 87 68 14 5
2294 'The cats on first looking to steal.' 1.2750 0.05893 80 61 16 3
2295 VR is becoming more real and less virtual 1.2747 0.05428 91 69 19 3
2296 So... meatballs for dinner? 1.2747 0.05649 91 70 17 4
2297 I’m sorry about your window, Mrs. Jones. 1.2747 0.04958 91 67 23 1
2298 Mom, we need to borrow a home plate. 1.2747 0.05428 91 69 19 3
2299 Well, he works for the MLB and needed to bring his work home. 1.2738 0.05952 84 65 15 4
2300 The cable bill has gone down significantly but the repair costs on the house have increased exponentially. 1.2738 0.06189 84 66 13 5
2301 A broken vase and window and they say there are 8 more innings ... 1.2738 0.05449 84 63 19 2
2302 These Zoom conferences are getting too realistic for my taste. 1.2738 0.05449 84 63 19 2
2303 Yeah, we got great seats. No, not /behind/ home... 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2304 Gotta make this quick-- I'm on deck 1.2738 0.04895 84 61 23 0
2305 Wait, are you purring? There's no purring in baseball! 1.2738 0.06189 84 66 13 5
2306 Can the person with the baseball game turn yourself on mute 1.2738 0.06416 84 67 11 6
2307 We are NOT in this together. 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2308 Mom, before you open the door scream: “Time out!” 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2309 At least I don’t have to watch it online... 1.2738 0.05952 84 65 15 4
2310 Yeah.. Home Play Station 1.2738 0.06189 84 66 13 5
2311 Yes, it was a home run. 1.2738 0.05952 84 65 15 4
2312 So far we're undefeated at home. 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2313 Given his profession, commuting by Skype was not really working out, so he decided to build a home office instead. 1.2738 0.06189 84 66 13 5
2314 I know I put that Wii Fit somewhere! 1.2738 0.05449 84 63 19 2
2315 Go home, Ron. Go home. 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2316 I didn't say it was obscure, I said it was inside baseball 1.2738 0.05952 84 65 15 4
2317 Let me call you back in the seventh inning stretch. 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2318 Unfortunately, it's a home game this week. 1.2738 0.05449 84 63 19 2
2319 Nothing much. Just watching some baseball in the living room. 1.2738 0.05449 84 63 19 2
2320 Bases loaded, bottom of the 14th day... 1.2738 0.05449 84 63 19 2
2321 No, I'll only talk to Doctor Fauci. Tell him it's an emergency. 1.2738 0.05449 84 63 19 2
2322 What lasts longer? Baseball games or quarantine? 1.2738 0.05179 84 62 21 1
2323 Not much, just watching the game. What are you up to? 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2324 Crazy, I know. But it’s the playoffs. 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2325 To prevent him from getting to first, you'll need a face mask. 1.2738 0.06189 84 66 13 5
2326 Yes, Mom, they took off their shoes before they came in the house. 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2327 It’s hard on the windows, but I’ve got a great view of the game. 1.2738 0.06189 84 66 13 5
2328 The best part is we never argue over the infield fly rule 1.2738 0.05952 84 65 15 4
2329 I'll have to call you back, I'm the umpire, the play by play announcer, and also third base. 1.2738 0.06189 84 66 13 5
2330 Hello, Commissioner's Office? Yes, please announce the start date of the season as soon as possible. Thank you! 1.2738 0.05952 84 65 15 4
2331 Thank God it is not sumo wrestling! 1.2738 0.06416 84 67 11 6
2332 Hello, Marge? You might want to open your doors ... he's practicing his line drive again. 1.2738 0.05952 84 65 15 4
2333 I told them it’s ok to play , but no spitting on the shag carpet 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2334 He can't hit the inside pitch. 1.2738 0.05179 84 62 21 1
2335 Do you have any fan experiences that are less immersive? 1.2738 0.06189 84 66 13 5
2336 We thought we'd just stay in and have a family game night. 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2337 World Series Game 7...Bottom of the 9th...Two Out...The Winning Run on the Couch... 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2338 It's OK - I'm in foul territory. 1.2738 0.05706 84 64 17 3
2339 You’re not six feet apart! 1.2738 0.05449 84 63 19 2
2340 I built it and they came... 1.2727 0.05416 88 69 15 4
2341 You said you missed sports. 1.2727 0.05766 88 68 16 4
2342 I have learnt one thing home isn't a place, it's a feeling 1.2727 0.05294 88 66 20 2
2343 Do you deliver peanuts and cracker jacks? 1.2727 0.05766 88 68 16 4
2344 The fantasy league made an abrupt adjustment this year and I’m not sure I’m up to another 161 games. 1.2727 0.05766 88 68 16 4
2345 Here comes the wind up, it’s a full count in the bottom of the sixth... 1.2727 0.05766 88 68 16 4
2346 So yeah, I would like a divorce. 1.2727 0.05988 88 69 14 5
2347 Look, can I call you back during the seventh inning stretch? 1.2727 0.05041 88 65 22 1
2348 Looks like it’s not just the bases that are loaded... 1.2727 0.05041 88 65 22 1
2349 How many times have I told you, guys? No shoes in the house! 1.2727 0.05988 88 69 14 5
2350 Yea, when I said "go home," this isn't what I meant. 1.2727 0.05766 88 68 16 4
2351 Well , it bears watching the Last Dance for the 20 th time 1.2727 0.05988 88 69 14 5
2352 No, I'm not kidding. I'd be happy to give you the play-by-play. 1.2727 0.05041 88 65 22 1
2353 Can you ask Karen in 3G if that was a ground rule double? 1.2727 0.05766 88 68 16 4
2354 Yes, Deloris, in the house! It’s the 11th inning and they are still scoreless. Netflix is out, but I did catch a pop fly in the 7th. Your father can’t throw a strike from six feet away! Maybe because he disinfects the ball after every pitch... 1.2727 0.05766 88 68 16 4
2355 Who said we can't have fans at our games? 1.2727 0.05766 88 68 16 4
2356 I’ll have to call you back. Ed’s up now. 1.2727 0.05988 88 69 14 5
2357 Unlike this cartoon, it's surprising how low the quality of The New Yorker cartoon talent has sunk, compared to past cartoonists, and Ralph, that last pitch was a little high. 1.2727 0.05988 88 69 14 5
2358 Sorry, can't talk now. The game is on. 1.2727 0.05766 88 68 16 4
2359 Catcher in the Rye House. 1.2727 0.05988 88 69 14 5
2360 Now I know what "home base" means. 1.2727 0.05766 88 68 16 4
2361 Dad said to come ask mom if we can play baseball inside. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2362 What is your return policy? 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2363 Bunt? Honey, why are you always signaling ‘bunt’? 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2364 I never missed sports in the first place. 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2365 Well, the boys are back in town. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2366 But I ordered the relief an hour ago. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2367 This shelter in place has made taking the boys to practice much easier. . 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2368 I tried to buy you some peanuts and cracker jacks, but people are hoarding that shit 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2369 #stayathomerun 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2370 It's not so bad working from home plate. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2371 Got a Father’s Day present for you. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2372 It started as game of toss, now we’re into game 3 of the ALDS. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2373 I Wish I was taller 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2374 Joyce? It’s Carol from 21B, the boys are looking for an outfielder, is Tim home? 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2375 This is still boring. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2376 Despite playing in the living room for years, Joe's not getting a lot of love from the home crowd tonight. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2377 Yes that’s right. One giant foam finger delivered ASAP. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2378 Hi, Jake. It’s me again. 1.2706 0.06565 85 69 9 7
2379 The bases are loaded, I gotta go! 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2380 You'd be astounded at how difficult it is to rent a hot dog vendor during these times 1.2706 0.06348 85 68 11 6
2381 NO TESTS! HOME RUNS ONLY 😂 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2382 This isn’t what I had in mind when you said “home game’” 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2383 What I wouldn’t give to be on the away team... 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2384 Be careful, the china cabinet is in the outfield! 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2385 I’ll be up late, the game just went into extra innings 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2386 I gotta go. It’s the bottom of the 9th and I’m sitting on 3rd base. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2387 How much for the Zoom Webinar upgrade again? 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2388 It's a really close game. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2389 I gotta run 1.2706 0.06348 85 68 11 6
2390 I've been told I'm the left field foul pole. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2391 No, Joe isn't here. He's left and gone away. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2392 They're quarantined, but the catcher still wears a mask. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2393 Quick--Tell me how the indoor fly rule works." John Canning Sea Cliff, New York 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2394 The game's very close, I'm watching it now. 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2395 You'll never guess who's quarantining at home with me? 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2396 Same as last night. It’s World Series game 7, bottom of the ninth, down by 3, bases loaded, full count, and a setup for a walk off home run whatever that means... 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2397 This quarantine can’t end soon enough! 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2398 We’re down to two gloves and one mask. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2399 I'll call you back after I go to the concession stand 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2400 Yea, my husband really wants to get to home base too." 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2401 Sorry I’ve got to run. I’m doing play by play. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2402 It's a small field and the players aren't very impressive, but tickets are free to residents. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2403 No trash cans, no problem 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2404 Well, I said I would make his wildest fantasy come true. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2405 No, Doris--I'm not on deck, I'm on the couch! 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2406 Yes, like everyone else, he's been working at home since March. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2407 I can’t get up until the seventh inning. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2408 Can you come downstairs? I need a relief pitcher. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2409 ''Didn't I tell you not to watch live baseball?'' 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2410 I hate these home games. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2411 Hi Mum..things are alright..there are less than 5 of us and Bill's wearing a mask.. 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2412 I don't mind them playing but they want me to clean up the peanuts and cracker jacks. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2413 I can't talk right now; it's the bottom of the 9th. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2414 Bottom of the seventh, two out and runners on first and third. What's new with you? 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2415 I gotta go, it's the bottom of the ninth week. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2416 That's correct 911. Only the catcher is wearing a mask. 1.2706 0.06348 85 68 11 6
2417 Grapefruit? Yeah, I have some here. 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2418 When I heard ‘change up’, ‘3 guys’ and ‘swing’, I pictured something with fewer cleats on the carpet. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2419 Game over, Steve Kornacki. I am no longer an undecided, college-educated, suburban white woman voter. 1.2706 0.06348 85 68 11 6
2420 Yeah, I'm making this a stay-at-homerun. 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2421 Fine. Just no spitballs. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2422 I swear if you hit a foul ball and it breaks a window, I'll quarantine you for life. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2423 This is the only way I can get them to wear gloves and masks. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2424 House rules apply. 1.2706 0.05128 85 63 21 1
2425 my therapist suggested joining the team to help with the "no crying" thing 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2426 Social distancing? The only one wearing a mask is the catcher! 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2427 I get it. Nothing but home runs. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2428 Yes, Commissioner, my name is Ruth. And, yes, I did build this house. But I'm telling you, there's been a huge mistake. 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2429 I finally got those couch seats I’ve been wanting! 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2430 No, it’s still raining 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2431 The remodel’s going to be awhile. Just about to open the living room. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2432 He said they would social distance. That they were just coming over to enjoy a ball game together... 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2433 Hi, I ordered a pitcher online but you sent me the wrong kind. 1.2706 0.06124 85 67 13 5
2434 That's not what they mean by "inside baseball". 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2435 Fred is working from home and it's getting pretty tiring. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2436 Sorry Linda gotta go Dave is one pitch away from a no hitter! 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
2437 Katie, I have to tell you about the new App I discovered on ESPN! 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
2438 I caught them using my Wedgewood for home plate. 1.2706 0.06348 85 68 11 6
2439 My boys of summer are up to foul play, and yours? 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
2440 I know he’s a player, but he always ends up coming home. 1.2697 0.06140 89 71 12 6
2441 This isn’t too bad. Not looking forward to hockey season. 1.2697 0.05481 89 68 18 3
2442 Watch out, darling, this is going to be a big one. 1.2697 0.06140 89 71 12 6
2443 He's been throwing inside all afternoon. 1.2697 0.05481 89 68 18 3
2444 An amazing catch, Flo - I don't know how he even saw the ball, what with all the flying bits of chandelier... 1.2697 0.05481 89 68 18 3
2445 I’m trying to figure out what a home run would look like. 1.2697 0.05709 89 69 16 4
2446 Yeah, they said you should create structure in your day during the pandemic. So we have hourly baseball games. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2447 The wife says I can go to second base tonight 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2448 Yes, honey. It’s bottom of the 5th now. I’ll keep you updated. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2449 For once I can say with certainty who’s pitching and who’s catching 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2450 Pete, who’s covering Left field window position? 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2451 Of course NOW they don’t want to play video games. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2452 Innings are the new outings 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2453 They call themselves the Lobetrotters, Sue. If I give them a place to practice I get free tickets. 1.2683 0.05220 82 61 20 1
2454 I don’t think this is what they meant by “stay at home.” 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2455 Hey honey... Those baseball players you ordered from Amazon have arrived. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2456 When they said I’d have front row seats at home plate I didn’t think it’d be MY home. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2457 This isn’t quite what I meant by a swingers party... 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2458 Does the TV have a low-definition setting? 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2459 Maybe it's virtual reality, maybe I've lost it 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2460 I'd like to report a missing cat 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2461 To be honest, I don’t mind the quarantine... I don’t remember the last time I went to a home game! 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2462 It’s a tight game. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2463 Oh my God, I think he spit on the ball !!"... 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2464 They said they’re following ‘stay at home run’ orders. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2465 better in than out 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2466 Yeah they have the home field advantage tonight 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2467 Tell the bullpen to get dinner warming up. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2468 No, Mom, I won't give you color commentary. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2469 A home run is a metaphor for going all the way. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2470 Time out! Mr. Whiskers is stealing signs again! 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2471 And it looks like even the home crowd has turned on him. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2472 It's just a typical Sunday. How about you? 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2473 My husband’s out. Send in the closer. 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2474 I checked the schedule...it's a home game. 1.2683 0.04923 82 60 22 0
2475 The score? It's 3 busted windows to 2 broken lamps. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2476 When a strikeout is a winner! 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2477 So what happens if he hits the ball? 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2478 We're staying home and taking one for the team. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2479 I can't stand it, Sandra—they're not wearing masks OR socially distancing. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2480 I just wanted to watch a rerun. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2481 Spring Training, 2020 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2482 Coaching first base. You? 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2483 Shouldn't of pressed "LIVE" now should I. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2484 Like I've always said...I call the balls and strikes in this house! 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2485 I don't see any home field advantage here! 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2486 There's two out in the ninth. Can I call you right back? 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2487 Oh the picture is fine, its the audio that isn't working 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2488 Both sides are claiming to be the home team. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2489 I'll let you know if he gets to first base. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2490 If you just wait another hour, the rain will stop! 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2491 Yeah Vickie, bases loaded do you want to Zoom in? 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2492 Suddenly I’m not feeling so safe at home. 1.2683 0.05220 82 61 20 1
2493 Six feet .... six feet 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2494 I had no choice, Mom. They were exhibiting withdrawal symptoms. 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2495 Remember our two cats? Well now there's one. 1.2683 0.06504 82 66 10 6
2496 The stadiums are quarantined so the're going door to door. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2497 Take it from me, becoming a stay-at-home-coach is the best decision I ever made. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2498 Well, it's certainly not my favorite pastime. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2499 Sorry, can’t talk right now. I’m in the middle of a pitch meeting. 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2500 And the Super Bowl is now scheduled for a rodeo stable in rural Wyoming. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2501 Corona baseball: 1st base is the kitchen; 2nd bathroom, 3rd bedroom. Home run (through the living room window) gets you a pass on cooking, kitchen cleanup, laundry, and all housework for a day. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2502 They are playing what they call ‘small ball!’ 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2503 Oh, it's OK. Henry always pitches no-hitters. 1.2683 0.05220 82 61 20 1
2504 Curve ball? Roger that. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2505 No, actually I don't miss televised sports at all. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2506 I can’t talk right now. Will call you back during the 7th Inning stretch 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2507 Yeah, I'm playing third. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2508 It’s a curve ball. I am signaling John now. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2509 Yes, I called for relief! 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2510 This was Gary's bright idea for our diamond anniversary. 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2511 you had better strike everybody out 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2512 Yeah. The catcher needs to move back about four feet. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2513 Not much, just sitting around watching the game. 1.2683 0.05220 82 61 20 1
2514 He said he would be safe at home, I had no idea. 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2515 Larry can't talk right now, Ma. He's out. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2516 When you said I’d get the best seat in the house, I didn’t think it would be in my house! 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2517 Honestly, I'd rather forgo the home team advantage. 1.2683 0.05220 82 61 20 1
2518 Hi, do you know how to get chewing tobacco out of carpet? 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2519 One more strike and I'm outta here, guys. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2520 Yeah, Millie, I'm looking right at it. These guys have no idea what a home run means. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2521 The cat is about to steal first; all rules are out the window! 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2522 It's the bottom of the 163rd inning so I'm hoping for an inside-the-house home run. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2523 He keeps shakin' him off. I think he wants to throw the knuckler. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2524 Never mind the distance to the pitcher's mound; the catcher is less than six feet from the batter! 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2525 Bottom of the ninth, bases loaded, only one out, but it's awful easy to hit into a double play at this venue. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2526 I remember when 'nose-bleed' seat meant distance, not because the batter accidentally hits you the face. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2527 This sport still sucks. 1.2683 0.05220 82 61 20 1
2528 We've been keeping it together pretty well during quarantine, but I have a feeling something's about to break. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2529 One second honey, Lenny is on third vase. 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2530 JT Realmuto, Mookie Betts and Max Scherzer at spring training 2020. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2531 same same but different 1.2683 0.05220 82 61 20 1
2532 The outfielders are joining via Zoom. 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2533 They all agreed: No Spit Balls inside the House! 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2534 Okay, fellas, this is it...tonight I'm getting to second base with my girlfriend. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2535 Can I get a hot dog and peanuts? You do contactless delivery, right? 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2536 Two fingers down. Is that a fast ball or a curve? 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2537 A six-pack, peanuts, a half dozen hotdogs and an apple pie. 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2538 I think Jim's taking my idea for game night a bit too literal... 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2539 Linda, when I told him he wasn't a team player I meant help with the dishes. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2540 A hot dog with mustard and a box of Cracker Jack... 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2541 Hello, Acme Window Repair? Yes, it’s me again. 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2542 Step up to home plate, on the home field, in our home. 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2543 And the best part, is that these stay at home baseball games can't be rained out. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
2544 When I said "Home Team", I meant... forget it! 1.2683 0.06023 82 64 14 4
2545 Thus TV is a little too ‘direct’. 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
2546 I don't know, third base?" 1.2683 0.05768 82 63 16 3
2547 That’s not what I meant when I said give me a ballpark estimate 1.2674 0.05830 86 67 15 4
2548 Hello, Grubhub? I’d like to order a hot dog and a bag of peanuts. 1.2674 0.05830 86 67 15 4
2549 Yes Dad, we're all so proud Bobby was picked in the draft. No, he's right here, I'll pull him. Bobby it's your Grandpa.. 1.2674 0.05591 86 66 17 3
2550 Just don’t hit the router! 1.2674 0.05830 86 67 15 4
2551 Strike Two!... but to me it looked just a little inside. 1.2674 0.05830 86 67 15 4
2552 Ha! A real parent isn’t afraid of homeschool P.E. 1.2674 0.06282 86 69 11 6
2553 Home Field Advantage !! 1.2658 0.05896 79 61 15 3
2554 Third base never felt this good before 1.2658 0.05614 79 60 17 2
2555 911. What’s your emergency?” “I’d like to report a battery. 1.2658 0.05896 79 61 15 3
2556 I heard baseball may not come back until 2021 man, I had to make do. 1.2658 0.05614 79 60 17 2
2557 Hold on a sec ..I feel a sudden urge to stretch. 1.2658 0.05896 79 61 15 3
2558 Quarantine for the Rich: "Yeah, they say we have to get used to a new normal." 1.2658 0.06165 79 62 13 4
2559 Yeh, thank you for the time guys but it still doesn’t have that real feel that I get on tv. 1.2658 0.05896 79 61 15 3
2560 I need to go before I get smacked in the teeth. 1.2658 0.06165 79 62 13 4
2561 There is no social distancing in baseball! 1.2658 0.06165 79 62 13 4
2562 But I’m left field... 1.2658 0.05896 79 61 15 3
2563 Yeah, we're on our way to the White House now. Don't worry, we'll make it look like a baseball game gone wrong. 1.2658 0.05896 79 61 15 3
2564 I know mom it's out first date. Don't worry...I won't let him past first base. 1.2658 0.05896 79 61 15 3
2565 Stadium can now open with a 50% maximum capacity! 1.2658 0.05614 79 60 17 2
2566 Of course it would have been another home run, but the cat stole third! 1.2658 0.05896 79 61 15 3
2567 Well it is a bit dangerous, but it’s just like being there! 1.2658 0.05614 79 60 17 2
2568 One Cheese. One Meat Lovers... 1.2651 0.05167 83 62 20 1
2569 Three strikes and you're in. 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
2570 Golf is on Sunday. 1.2651 0.06201 83 66 12 5
2571 Yes, but I didn't realize my new HD tv would actually bring the game to my living room. 1.2651 0.06433 83 67 10 6
2572 Yeah. You heard me right. Start warming up the lefty. 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
2573 Don't worry, I saw this in an M. Night Shyamalan movie. 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
2574 Three po’ boys and a case of corona for delivery thanks. 1.2651 0.06201 83 66 12 5
2575 Take me into the ball game, Take me out of the crowd. 1.2651 0.05959 83 65 14 4
2576 Excited about baseball returning? You could say that, yes. 1.2651 0.05959 83 65 14 4
2577 Another home run. That's all we have now. 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
2578 Hello, Minor League Painters? This is not the team I was expecting. 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2579 Yes, yes, I am working at home. 1.2651 0.05959 83 65 14 4
2580 They have a ball and a bat and a catcher. What’s that game called again? 1.2651 0.05959 83 65 14 4
2581 Break a window and you're out. 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
2582 Trust me when I tell you, watching my new tv is like being at the game! 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2583 Shelter in place order can't end soon enough for me. 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2584 Homeschool. Day 86. Mama needs her Baseball. 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
2585 She's trying to follow the Covid-19 Guidelines to prevent sign stealing! 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
2586 Today they’re the home team. 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2587 Yes, but at least they’ve stopped playing hockey in the kitchen. 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2588 9-1-1 HELP I don't feel safe at home! 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2589 My brothers are in town this week from Pawtucket and the cat and I are both wondering, is minor league ball actually more exciting? 1.2651 0.05959 83 65 14 4
2590 Do you want me to record the big game? 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
2591 Define “shelter.” 1.2651 0.05959 83 65 14 4
2592 I'd like to order hot dogs and a overpriced small beer in a collectable cup for delivery, please. 1.2651 0.05959 83 65 14 4
2593 I think it's time to bring in the lefty. 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2594 Yeah, its the bottom of the 9th. I'll be freed in 10 minutes. 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
2595 You can get peanuts and crackerjack on Amazon 1.2651 0.06201 83 66 12 5
2596 I have to go! The 7th Inning stretch will be starting soon. 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2597 It's not really that bad .....plus I got a job as the third base coach 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2598 Apparently it was our week to host game night. 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2599 When you said you're were going to pitch in, I thought you meant you were finally going to help me with the kids. 1.2651 0.06201 83 66 12 5
2600 Yeah, I agreed to let the whole league have their entire season in my living room. I figured that TV I ordered from Amazon is never going to arrive anyway. 1.2651 0.05959 83 65 14 4
2601 He is sure he can knock Trump out of the park! 1.2651 0.06201 83 66 12 5
2602 Well, it's two strikes, one ball, and the bottom of this marriage. 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
2603 No dear, it's always a home run now. 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
2604 It looks like I'm the one who struck out when I asked him to clean the garage. 1.2644 0.05535 87 67 17 3
2605 Home run if you break the lamp. 1.2644 0.05535 87 67 17 3
2606 I hate sports analogies. 1.2644 0.05771 87 68 15 4
2607 I think I've become someone's augmented reality. 1.2632 0.05733 76 58 16 2
2608 He put the CDC on hold, he’s waiting to hear from the Astros dugout 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2609 New distance regulations - 6 ft./6 in. 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2610 If the people don’t want to come out to the ballpark, nobody’s going to stop them. 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2611 Why is your brother the only one wearing his mask? 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2612 Not exactly what I had in mind when he said he was going to work from home from now on 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2613 Yeah, so we found a way to bring baseball back. 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2614 Who’s on first? First?! Is today the first?!! 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2615 I'll call you back I'm in the middle of a baseball game 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2616 Apparently, ‘throw a no-hitter’ was next on his quarantine list 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2617 Hello, Iowa? Is it okay to send them back to the fields? 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2618 Hi I’d like to cancel sports live streaming, it leaves a lot to be desired 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2619 Americans in quarantine redefine “Home Run.” 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2620 Last guy hit it out of the parquet 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2621 Sorry Mark, four strikes.. house rules. 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2622 Honestly, I prefer watching the games on tv. There's a guy in my kitchen who keeps screaming for me to buy a fifteen dollar Bud Light. It's sort of obnoxious. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2623 Break it I dare you 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2624 Yeah, MLB is offering Delivery or Take Me Out now. 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2625 We’re safe at home. 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2626 Yes, still holding for the commissioner. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2627 Inside the living room is a single, dining room’s a double, kitchen’s a triple, and if anyone gets a home run mom’s gonna be pissed. 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2628 Over the TV is Out. 1.2625 0.06350 80 64 11 5
2629 Wii Sports is getting more elaborate. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2630 Just watchin’ the game, what are you up to? 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2631 Yes, Mother. I’m keeping them in. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2632 I’m a little too close. 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2633 Honestly Jeff, this is taking home field advantage a little too literally 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2634 We’re all playing the field. 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2635 #lineup #topoftheorder Armchair manager on deck, house cat in the hole 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2636 If you imagine it, they will come. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2637 Ryan, can you get me a hotdog and a beer? 1.2625 0.04950 80 59 21 0
2638 God , I miss those away games! 1.2625 0.04950 80 59 21 0
2639 So they’ve changed social distancing guidelines from 6 feet to 60 feet and six inches? I guess the boys will just have to take this outside 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2640 At least they don't gain quarantine weight 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2641 Yeah, they call it America’s national pastime...I guess it must be the part where you just ignore what’s going on right in front of you? 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2642 I catch all the home games, I have see son's tickets. 1.2625 0.06350 80 64 11 5
2643 So, we need a ruling. Is it 60 feet 6 inches or 6 feet? 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2644 Janet, I can't believe you never told me about your husband's wad! 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2645 Then I made the mistake of saying ‘BRING HIM HOME!’ 1.2625 0.06350 80 64 11 5
2646 Actually I don’t miss baseball that much 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2647 I'm up next. Speak to you later 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2648 Can you believe it? I’m working out a cable deal. We could be on the Ocho! 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2649 Hm hm yes we know... Yes mother... Kids and I are aware parcs are still closed 1.2625 0.04950 80 59 21 0
2650 Sorry can't talk. I'm watching the Yankees. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2651 I'll call you right back. It's almost the 7th inning stretch. 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2652 First row, third base line. I couldn’t believe it! 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2653 Yes. They're all here in the livingroom,about to break up the house that you built,Ruth. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2654 Take me out at the ball game 1.2625 0.06350 80 64 11 5
2655 No, they pinch hit for me in the 7th so I'm just watching. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2656 I hope they figure out of a way to have a baseball season before the next home run. 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2657 Hey Gus, are you busy? The fans here could really use a beer vendor! 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2658 yes,you can hit pause. no you can't change the channel. 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2659 On the brighter side, it really does speed up the game... 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2660 Nope, it's still a boring game. 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2661 Gotta go, my fantasy baseball game just materialized. 1.2625 0.06350 80 64 11 5
2662 I’m still not quite sure how I feel about this Virtual Reality add-on to my streaming service. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2663 Get the left-hander warmed up in the bedroom 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2664 Hi, Stan, I know you've been in the insurance business forever, but I think now you can finally say you've heard 'em all. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2665 Yeah-- it's a home game, and I'm callin' it. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2666 Yeah, this new 3D TV is a bit much. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2667 Hello. Do you deliver peanuts and Cracker Jacks? 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2668 Spring Training will never be the same. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2669 I’ll call you back when there’s an away game. 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2670 Watch out. He’s coming with a high, inside fast ball. 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2671 They're great. Third-base line. 1.2625 0.06595 80 65 9 6
2672 We’re making the best of it. 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2673 And the count is 3 and 2. 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2674 When baseball games are cancelled due to a nationwide lock down so you create your own baseball game at home 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2675 Have you been seeing a lot of Cardinals and Blue Jays this year ? 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2676 I have to go-I’m on deck 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2677 It's getting harder to root, root, root for the home team. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2678 Hello? Joe's window glass repair? 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2679 Honey, can you have Lefty start warming up in the den? 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
2680 No, not inside-baseball, I said they are playing baseball inside. 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2681 Can you hold on a sec? Suddenly it's gotten interesting. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2682 Play ball or talk louder 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2683 This new streaming service is great! Its like having them right in your living room. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2684 That's the least of it—only the catcher is wearing a mask! 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2685 When he told me he was working at home, I didn't think he wanted me to spectate. 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2686 Will you please quit spitting tobacco juice on the carpet? 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2687 It's certainly not a home field advantage for me! 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2688 I thought I told you to only call me between innings 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2689 LOCKDOWN season 6 episode 3 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2690 Johnny’s on third right now. I’ll have him call you when he crosses home. 1.2625 0.05260 80 60 19 1
2691 It's inside baseball," you said. "Try me," I said. Regrettably 1.2625 0.05831 80 62 15 3
2692 At first base, we have a new hitter. Will he be able to get a strike and run around the couch without injuring the cat? Let's find out. 1.2625 0.04950 80 59 21 0
2693 No, I an NOT third base. 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
2694 Where's Steve? He's in the dining room stealin