Contest #704


Cartoon

704

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “No, you come in on four.”
  2. “Don’t worry. We know how to conduct ourselves.”
  3. “We promise there will be no awkward silence.”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2020-04-05T18:18:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2020-04-19T18:20:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2020-04-13T18:19:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued April 20, 2020
Number of captions 4854
Number of responses 1076611
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Forget everything you've ever thought about elevator music. 2.2026 0.00557 16951 3095 7335 6521
1 You're in 702? Awesome, we're in 704" 2.1281 0.00616 16172 4064 5984 6124
2 Neither one of us plays, but we find they keep people at least six feet away. 2.1213 0.00624 14911 3545 6025 5341
3 We've been asked to work from home. 2.0683 0.00671 13322 3601 5225 4496
4 This is orchestra. You want mezzanine. 1.9932 0.00648 14211 4309 5704 4198
5 Sorry, this elevator is for top brass only. 1.9816 0.00684 13378 4317 4995 4066
6 I’d get in if I were you ...the other car has the percussion section ! 1.9813 0.00644 13527 3936 5918 3673
7 Room 310 asked for a wake-up call. 1.9479 0.00700 11967 3841 4914 3212
8 A man purse? You know how ridiculous you look? 1.9468 0.00736 12314 4488 4019 3807
9 Sorry, pal. Tubas accompany, three's a crowd. 1.9298 0.00771 11084 4083 3705 3296
10 We’re taking our music to the next level. 1.9279 0.00724 11357 3865 4476 3016
11 No, you come in on four. 1.9241 0.00769 10494 3715 3877 2902
12 Don’t worry. We know how to conduct ourselves. 1.8933 0.00732 10751 3750 4406 2595
13 You’d better get in — the next car has 76 trombones. 1.8894 0.00742 11075 4072 4161 2842
14 Finally, someone to push the button for us. 1.8571 0.00845 8262 3129 3193 1940
15 A lady on 16 said 'Send me to Aruba,' but that's not what Alexa heard. 1.8418 0.00883 8286 3447 2707 2132
16 We're practicing social dissonance. 1.8378 0.02332 1190 497 389 304
17 We're not together 1.8140 0.01005 6015 2498 2146 1371
18 After a night of drinking and debauchery, John arrives home to face the music. 1.8104 0.00959 6792 2889 2302 1601
19 The little bell that goes 'ding' at each floor is broken. 1.8097 0.00883 7708 3195 2788 1725
20 If you prefer the traditional awkward silence,wait for the next car. 1.8046 0.00798 8561 3340 3558 1663
21 Yeah, it has its ups and downs. But a gig is a gig. 1.8003 0.00853 7736 3112 3061 1563
22 Fitness initiative by the hotel. You'd be surprised how many guests have been opting for the stairs. 1.7992 0.00937 6329 2528 2547 1254
23 It pretty much guarantees social distancing. 1.7861 0.01154 3805 1458 1703 644
24 Twenty bucks and we won't play. 1.7782 0.00899 7196 3072 2649 1475
25 The acoustics in here are incredible! 1.7748 0.00860 7328 3004 2975 1349
26 If you're a saint, come marching in. 1.7675 0.01039 5505 2425 1935 1145
27 We're desperately seeking Souza. 1.7595 0.00995 6008 2697 2066 1245
28 What do you mean you hate elevator music? 1.7594 0.00749 9611 4092 3792 1727
29 Sure, you can wait for the other one. But, I have to warn you, it has bagpipes. 1.7560 0.00864 7398 3182 2849 1367
30 It was the easiest way to carry the toilet paper out of Costco without raising suspicion 1.7466 0.00984 6153 2814 2087 1252
31 No bread or milk but we managed to get the last two sousaphones in town 1.7434 0.00938 6673 3036 2315 1322
32 We're your downstairs neighbors in 3G. We just wanted to give you one final opportunity to reconsider keeping that treadmill. 1.7287 0.01435 2846 1324 970 552
33 Is this the ICU? We're here with the new ventilators from POTUS. 1.7261 0.01168 4754 2374 1311 1069
34 Look, we don’t like the idea of working from home either 1.7243 0.01116 4316 1922 1664 730
35 Prepare to be intubated. 1.7220 0.01360 3396 1670 1000 726
36 Better jump in. There are 76 trombones in the next car. 1.7193 0.00841 7809 3623 2797 1389
37 We’re going up an octave 1.7180 0.01176 3975 1810 1476 689
38 Stop calling it a tuba and I'll stop calling it a "man-purse." 1.7157 0.01005 5525 2551 1994 980
39 Sorry, this elevator is reserved exclusively for the big brass. 1.7143 0.00941 6283 2910 2263 1110
40 Your first journey out of the house in months deserves a little pomp and circumstance, no? 1.7128 0.01392 2855 1317 1041 497
41 You didn't notice if a marching band got off on this floor did you?" 1.6968 0.01069 4674 2172 1747 755
42 No seriously, do you know how to get to Carnegie Hall? 1.6899 0.02300 1032 491 370 171
43 Oh, we don't play. It just keeps others six-feet away. 1.6865 0.00989 5388 2530 2017 841
44 Are you the guy who complained that the ice machine is too noisy? 1.6817 0.01206 3871 1901 1301 669
45 Hop in, the other elevator is baroque 1.6812 0.01318 3391 1713 1047 631
46 This is all that's left of the national endowment of the arts 1.6764 0.01398 3038 1563 901 574
47 We tried taking the stairs, but we get winded. 1.6647 0.01190 3671 1816 1297 558
48 Don't be ridiculous, of course we're essential. 1.6621 0.01180 3753 1890 1283 580
49 We can't leave. Your ex-wife paid for the whole day in advance. 1.6576 0.01458 2649 1357 844 448
50 Wanna hear our elevator pitch? 1.6486 0.01732 1824 934 598 292
51 We'd let you on, but we have our marching orders. 1.6445 0.01168 3696 1824 1363 509
52 Would you like to accompany us? 1.6403 0.01462 2299 1132 865 302
53 If there's a rabbi and duck behind you two guys, I've heard this joke. 1.6349 0.01487 2487 1310 779 398
54 519? We're in 518! 1.6346 0.01264 3268 1670 1123 475
55 Do you mind if we accompany you? 1.6320 0.01149 3788 1941 1329 518
56 No room-pah-pah. 1.6296 0.02134 1242 666 370 206
57 You can step in but there’s a reason they don’t call it a threeba. 1.6291 0.01734 1844 979 568 296
58 Yes, it's a coincidence. 1.6256 0.02164 1087 556 382 149
59 They help with social distancing 1.6213 0.01350 2614 1313 984 317
60 Sorry, we're going up an octave. 1.6169 0.01187 3610 1874 1245 491
61 Yes, we are going down, but no more than an octave. 1.6094 0.01163 3679 1914 1288 477
62 Your call, Buddy, but there are bagpipes in the next one. 1.6064 0.01275 2980 1552 1055 373
63 Take the next one. This is for the top brass only. 1.6055 0.01200 3498 1901 1117 480
64 Get out? We're not sure how we got in. 1.5858 0.01605 1965 1075 630 260
65 You're welcome to get on but we have to warn you, the acoustics are terrible. 1.5835 0.01268 2999 1610 1029 360
66 Looking for the unemployment office? Follow us. 1.5821 0.01525 2192 1208 692 292
67 Your name better be Sandy, this better be your birthday and you better tell your girlfriend what a great surprise this was. 1.5789 0.01663 1876 1048 570 258
68 Might as well squeeze in ... the next one's got the piano. 1.5771 0.01395 2589 1431 822 336
69 We will now play "Concerto No. 3 for Elevator and Two Tubas" by Otis. 1.5700 0.01881 1500 859 427 214
70 Did you think that elevator music just magically happens? 1.5625 0.01655 1719 945 581 193
71 Take the stairs, book boy. 1.5617 0.01621 2222 1354 490 378
72 We're the Trump Tower Social Distancing Enforcement Rapid Response Team. 1.5593 0.02446 928 552 233 143
73 Jerry was strangely comforted to see the universe messing with everyone. 1.5591 0.02425 905 528 248 129
74 Elevator music. 1.5578 0.01519 2112 1188 670 254
75 No worries, there's room in the Bach. 1.5530 0.01829 1519 877 444 198
76 Flat B, please. 1.5528 0.02316 881 493 289 99
77 We're filling in while the Muzak is being fixed. 1.5519 0.01603 1754 972 600 182
78 How about “Stairway to Heaven?” 1.5505 0.01651 1831 1058 540 233
79 The stairs don’t look so bad now, do they? 1.5474 0.02045 1065 587 373 105
80 He tooted...not me 1.5451 0.01658 1719 1035 473 211
81 We can play the theme from "Shaft". 1.5412 0.02200 1044 616 294 134
82 Some say the acoustics will blow you away, but we feel it will elevate you 1.5412 0.02404 850 493 254 103
83 Hey, in this economy a gig's a gig. 1.5368 0.01650 1494 885 466 143
84 Oh, there's plenty of room for you, but Steve just tooted. 1.5348 0.01879 1464 877 391 196
85 March madness. 1.5339 0.02483 796 467 233 96
86 C'mon. After three floors you will hardly notice it. 1.5299 0.01841 1340 767 436 137
87 does this make me look fat? 1.5290 0.02773 673 407 176 90
88 Tuba or not Tuba? Really? That's your question? 1.5272 0.01981 1286 772 350 164
89 The stairs were too much treble. 1.5256 0.02029 1174 694 343 137
90 We're not going down. We're getting down. 1.5251 0.01909 1257 733 391 133
91 He’s the Oom, I’m the Pah! 1.5246 0.01906 1260 732 396 132
92 Hurry up! The pool is closing soon, and these took forever to inflate. 1.5245 0.02557 736 435 216 85
93 If this does not make people keep a “social distance,” nothing will. 1.5228 0.01921 1270 745 386 139
94 I'm sorry, we don't know The Sound Of Silence. 1.5207 0.01992 1181 697 354 130
95 We're offering locally-sourced elevator music today. 1.5179 0.01943 1176 681 381 114
96 Just until our subway station reopens. 1.5174 0.01827 1150 708 339 103
97 Is that a piccolo, or are you just happy to see us? 1.5149 0.02358 940 584 228 128
98 We promise there will be no awkward silence. 1.5136 0.02011 1106 647 350 109
99 Floors a one, an' a two, an' a three, an' a four. 1.5115 0.02509 741 442 219 80
100 Yeah, we know it's not the best arrangement. 1.5110 0.03790 319 189 97 33
101 The acoustics are almost as good as the ladies' room. 1.5110 0.01781 1094 677 331 86
102 Here's a little tune by Buddy Holly. It's called, 'Wake Up Little Sousa.' 1.5109 0.02669 687 418 187 82
103 These babies will get you thirty, maybe forty feet of distance, easy. 1.5109 0.02115 1055 633 305 117
104 Going up pa pah? 1.5079 0.02173 1012 613 284 115
105 If people still don't get social distancing, then we'll switch to bagpipes. 1.5073 0.02066 1025 606 321 98
106 What time is your wake-up call again? 1.5057 0.02062 1050 647 295 108
107 This elevator's only big enough for the tuba us. 1.5051 0.02695 681 420 178 83
108 Just turn around and walk away...we're not afraid to use these. 1.5037 0.02181 957 575 283 99
109 Have you seen a guy waving a stick around wildly? 1.5034 0.02276 894 539 260 95
110 This really helps promote social distancing. 1.5030 0.02055 1000 583 331 86
111 Watch your step. I just emptied my spit valve. 1.4978 0.02282 928 574 246 108
112 We're finally dealing with that kid playing the violin in 7B. 1.4972 0.02267 899 547 257 95
113 Hi there – we’re your new neighbors. 1.4966 0.02255 890 538 262 90
114 If you have a trombone, you could probably horn your way in. 1.4960 0.02146 883 519 293 71
115 Sir, these are sousaphones. NO ONE is stupid enough to play a tuba on an elevator! 1.4956 0.02371 801 484 237 80
116 We repurposed them into social distancing devices. 1.4922 0.02204 898 549 260 89
117 I hope you enjoy live elevator music. 1.4889 0.02175 859 508 283 68
118 You could say we invented social distancing 1.4879 0.02371 828 513 226 89
119 You guys are good, but the performance I saw yesterday was on another level. 1.4876 0.02400 769 468 227 74
120 I hate these small venues. 1.4867 0.02338 791 483 233 75
121 This isn't what it looks like. 1.4817 0.02413 766 472 219 75
122 Hi, we're the Elevator Brothers, and this is 'WAKE UP, Little Sousa!' 1.4806 0.02443 747 461 213 73
123 You should see how they bring up the pianist. 1.4794 0.02414 753 463 219 71
124 No, I don't think today will end on a high note. 1.4794 0.02457 753 469 207 77
125 Godot? 1.4793 0.02628 653 408 178 67
126 Seventy-six trombones stuck in the balcony, while a hundred and ten coronets take the stairs. 1.4786 0.02484 748 469 200 79
127 It was supposed to be a scuba convention, but SOMEBODY misheard. 1.4764 0.02628 678 429 175 74
128 this is the only rehearsal space that hasn't been shut down 1.4759 0.02387 685 407 230 48
129 Someone at the penthouse ordered a major blow job. 1.4755 0.02686 715 475 142 98
130 Do you by any chance know what floor the Goldstein bar mitzvah is on ? 1.4741 0.02472 696 430 204 62
131 Guess what, Neighbor! With the arts center closed, Joyce and I now get to practice at home! 1.4722 0.02492 701 435 201 65
132 Hope you don't mind elevator music. 1.4717 0.02320 706 450 203 53
133 We're looking for B flat. 1.4703 0.02430 706 433 214 59
134 I need to warn you, we only play elevator music. 1.4700 0.03336 400 251 110 39
135 I'm not looking for any treble 1.4695 0.02474 688 424 205 59
136 Up On The Roof? Sure, in fact, that's our number one request. 1.4693 0.02415 684 414 219 51
137 Everyone keeps telling us we're on the wrong floor." 1.4677 0.03357 387 242 109 36
138 Better take the next elevator Sir. We only have room for a flute. 1.4671 0.02586 623 384 187 52
139 This is the new normal. 1.4666 0.02685 658 425 159 74
140 We're in a New Yorker cartoon. 1.4664 0.02530 639 408 173 58
141 Apparently we aren't welcome in the lobby. 1.4645 0.02505 648 398 199 51
142 I know what you're thinking, yes we are wearing the same shoes. 1.4645 0.02711 605 383 163 59
143 The good news is the building manager listened to your complaint about the elevator music. 1.4630 0.02647 622 392 172 58
144 Whoa! Check out the dude with the shoulder bag. 1.4610 0.03166 449 287 117 45
145 Whoa there, we don't want any treble. 1.4606 0.02677 634 407 162 65
146 Consider us A-Minor inconvenience. 1.4598 0.02717 609 390 158 61
147 Sorry, not everyone gets a pair of angels playing harps on their first request. 1.4596 0.02392 594 399 153 42
148 Is the hearing aid convention on this floor? 1.4583 0.02715 600 383 159 58
149 We’re here to start your day on a low note. 1.4574 0.02645 599 376 172 51
150 Sir, don't make us blow these. Please step back six feet. 1.4574 0.02667 575 358 171 46
151 Trump sent these in lieu of ventilators. 1.4574 0.02742 610 395 151 64
152 It's Tuba Tuesday. There was a memo. 1.4564 0.02658 574 357 172 45
153 We can only take you an octave down. 1.4558 0.02676 599 380 165 54
154 We also accept tips for not playing. 1.4533 0.02709 567 360 158 49
155 Tuba or not tuba, that is the question. 1.4514 0.02794 576 374 144 58
156 Trust me, it's better than awkward silence. 1.4471 0.02762 539 342 153 44
157 Hides the farts. 1.4461 0.02924 538 355 126 57
158 They keep everyone at least 6 feet away. 1.4459 0.02709 536 336 161 39
159 We doubled in only one day and we’ll be a quartet by tomorrow. By next week they’ll start to notice and it will be too late. 1.4457 0.02913 516 335 132 49
160 Do YOU think there’s room? 1.4451 0.02855 537 349 137 51
161 We go where the music takes us. 1.4438 0.02851 525 339 139 47
162 Our agent said he wanted to book us into smaller venues. 1.4436 0.02801 514 326 148 40
163 We've lost our key to E Flat. 1.4432 0.02809 519 331 146 42
164 This is nothing, you should have seen us in the cab on the way over! 1.4429 0.02740 508 317 157 34
165 Tuck your shirt in; you look like a dork. 1.4425 0.03026 513 343 113 57
166 I swear, that sound you heard was the tuba! 1.4420 0.02978 500 328 123 49
167 Unless you're a piccolo player the elevator is full. 1.4419 0.02837 525 339 140 46
168 They told us to bring the Big Brass with us when we go upstairs to the board meeting. 1.4408 0.02782 515 327 149 39
169 No, my pharmacy order was mouthwash. floss, and a tube a toothpaste. 1.4400 0.03076 475 314 113 48
170 This car's full. Wait for the woodwind section. 1.4398 0.02504 507 325 159 23
171 It ain't called a threeba. Now scram! 1.4397 0.02866 514 333 136 45
172 We’re here to meet with the top brass. 1.4395 0.02834 512 329 141 42
173 What time would you like your wake-up call? 1.4384 0.02727 495 331 125 39
174 Hi, we’re your new neighbors. 1.4380 0.02767 500 315 151 34
175 Yes, we know "The Girl From Ipanema." 1.4380 0.02811 500 318 145 37
176 We only have room for a flutist. 1.4374 0.02784 503 319 148 36
177 My apologies . You ordered an Uber? 1.4371 0.03084 485 325 108 52
178 We're a new live music service....Tuber. 1.4358 0.02960 491 322 124 45
179 Can you press 9 for us? 1.4350 0.02967 469 304 126 39
180 C’mon Ralph! Late for work and forgot your tuba, again? 1.4340 0.03204 424 280 104 40
181 The President said these would work. 1.4319 0.03049 477 318 112 47
182 We're the hospital's new intubation unit. 1.4307 0.03034 469 315 108 46
183 'In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida?' No problem! 1.4289 0.03002 464 305 119 40
184 Sorry, we only stop on the 3rd, the 5th, and 8th. 1.4289 0.02987 464 304 121 39
185 Two tunas? Oh, my mistake. 1.4286 0.03012 455 298 119 38
186 Either squeeze in now or you will end up with the percussion section. 1.4276 0.02808 456 314 106 36
187 Sorry, reserved for the top brass only. 1.4273 0.02984 454 296 122 36
188 President's Task Force for COVID-19. Don't ask. 1.4273 0.03127 454 305 104 45
189 We're part of the Shelter In Place Orchestra. The rest of the brass are on 3, 4, and 5, the strings are on 10, 11, 12, woodwinds are in the roof garden and the piano and timpani are in the lobby. 1.4273 0.03080 454 302 110 42
190 Do you know Stairway to Heaven? 1.4270 0.02960 452 293 125 34
191 Are you the one complaining about the elevator music? 1.4254 0.02922 449 289 129 31
192 Did you see which floor the 76 trombones went to? 1.4254 0.03006 449 294 119 36
193 Sorry–we’re headed up for a meeting with the top brass. 1.4244 0.03000 443 289 120 34
194 Want to listen to our elevator pitch? 1.4240 0.03043 441 290 115 36
195 You can come in if you like, but I have to warn you, the acoustics suck. 1.4240 0.03060 441 291 113 37
196 Is this floor where the saints go marching in? 1.4240 0.03043 441 290 115 36
197 Are there two plants standing against the wall? On each side of this elevator...just nod your head if they are there. 1.4230 0.03174 435 293 100 42
198 We're here to accompany you. 1.4217 0.02953 434 280 125 29
199 Board meeting. We're the brass. 1.4213 0.02980 432 280 122 30
200 Elevator polka was deemed an essential service. 1.4211 0.02709 418 287 106 25
201 Did you call for a TUber? 1.4209 0.03025 430 281 117 32
202 I know—it’s not what’s I thought ‘intubation’ meant either. 1.4204 0.03304 402 272 91 39
203 What? You were expecting 76 trombones? 1.4202 0.03062 426 280 113 33
204 Never seen a guy with a beret before? 1.4199 0.03249 381 251 100 30
205 Trump said playing tuba cures COVID-19... 1.4194 0.03190 422 284 99 39
206 Fuck trump. 1.4190 0.03423 420 296 72 52
207 Wait till you hear the acoustics when the door closes. 1.4185 0.03120 411 271 108 32
208 Your wife in 7G said you could use a pair of brass ones. 1.4169 0.03310 391 264 91 36
209 The good news is no one will hear you fart. 1.4158 0.03263 392 263 95 34
210 What happens in the elevator, stays in the elevator. 1.4156 0.03012 409 265 118 26
211 Sorry, fella. This elevator is reserved for the top brass 1.4156 0.03167 409 273 102 34
212 We're making elevator music great again. 1.4144 0.03160 403 268 103 32
213 Sorry, but the acoustics in here are incredible. 1.4135 0.03122 399 263 107 29
214 With these on, everyone stays 6 feet away! 1.4135 0.03202 399 267 99 33
215 Totally understand. People have been social distancing from us for years now. 1.4124 0.03810 291 197 68 26
216 Wanna hear "Flight of the Bumblebee"? 1.4122 0.03274 376 251 95 30
217 On a chance encounter, Bill realized that his Sousaphobia had suddenly returned. 1.4122 0.03174 393 261 102 30
218 We got the last two. 1.4118 0.03266 391 264 93 34
219 Going up or down an octave? 1.4107 0.03220 392 263 97 32
220 This elevator is exclusively for top brass. 1.4107 0.03257 375 250 96 29
221 Why are you carrying a man purse? 1.4103 0.03271 390 264 92 34
222 We can only go up to B flat. 1.4103 0.03148 390 258 104 28
223 Congratulations! You’re the millionth rider. 1.4099 0.05021 161 108 40 13
224 Sorry! There's not even an inch of oboe room in here. 1.4093 0.03191 386 257 100 29
225 We successfully smuggled in the toilet paper. 1.4084 0.03105 382 267 84 31
226 The executive elevator is only for the top brass. 1.4084 0.03235 382 256 96 30
227 Hi. Welcome to our live stream. 1.4079 0.03268 380 256 93 31
228 Is this floor 1 and 2 and 3 and 4 and? 1.4069 0.02853 376 265 88 23
229 They were on sale. 1.4069 0.03313 376 255 89 32
230 The next thirty-eight elevators are full. 1.4064 0.03170 374 247 102 25
231 Hey, aren't you guys supposed to be six measures apart? 1.4059 0.03182 372 246 101 25
232 Yes, it’s your turn to face the music. 1.4057 0.03317 350 233 92 25
233 Just our way to enforce social distancing. 1.4054 0.02828 370 255 97 18
234 We can go up, but only about an octave. 1.4048 0.03198 373 248 99 26
235 Sorry this elevator is going down an octave. 1.4048 0.03175 373 247 101 25
236 With social distancing, George no longer had to feel guilty about refusing to share an elevator with certain people. 1.4048 0.03264 373 251 93 29
237 FEMA said they are respirators. 1.4048 0.03358 336 223 90 23
238 Trust me pal, this is worse for me, I graduated from Juilliard. 1.4017 0.03244 361 241 95 25
239 This only goes to 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4 1.4017 0.03268 361 242 93 26
240 Are you sure you want to be intubated? 1.4017 0.03406 361 248 81 32
241 No sir, this is the TROMBONE tower. 1.4017 0.02584 361 262 81 18
242 You're in luck. We are taking requests. 1.4017 0.03244 361 241 95 25
243 We're working on our elevator pitch. 1.4017 0.03303 361 246 86 29
244 So much for ending the day on a high note. 1.4011 0.03256 359 240 94 25
245 After us come the trombones, the cornets should be close behind. If I were you, I'd take the stairs. 1.4006 0.03219 357 237 97 23
246 Fred, you forgot about Tuba Tuesday again?!?! 1.4000 0.03231 355 236 96 23
247 People are tired of elevator music. 1.3994 0.02385 353 262 75 16
248 It keeps us 6 feet apart. 1.3994 0.03218 353 234 97 22
249 With no one taking the subway, the buskers had to improvise. 1.3989 0.03402 351 240 82 29
250 We have no trouble keeping people six feet away.” 1.3983 0.02977 349 239 93 17
251 We can play elevator music or polka. 1.3971 0.03292 345 231 91 23
252 You didn't, by chance, see pass by, like, seventy-six trombones. 1.3965 0.03381 343 233 84 26
253 Maestro said we need to rest between the fourth and the fifth. 1.3959 0.03343 341 232 84 25
254 After 50 years of trying, the Alfie Brothers finally succeed at making elevator music worse. 1.3959 0.03317 341 240 74 27
255 We're here to enforce the quarantine. We'll be your musical accompaniment until you go back home. 1.3941 0.03296 340 228 90 22
256 Or you could ride up with the guys playing harps. 1.3941 0.03269 340 227 92 21
257 You can get on at intermission. 1.3941 0.03348 340 230 86 24
258 we are here to encourage you to stay at home 1.3941 0.03348 340 230 86 24
259 You seen a guy with a baton? 1.3935 0.03308 338 227 89 22
260 Tuba or not tuba. That is your question. 1.3929 0.03294 336 241 69 26
261 On that note, I will wait for the next elevator. 1.3922 0.03414 334 230 78 26
262 Would you like to hear Stairway to Heaven? 1.3922 0.03387 334 227 83 24
263 We figured it would be unfair to bother only our immediate neighbors 1.3916 0.03347 332 226 83 23
264 The little chime sound is out of order. 1.3916 0.03347 332 224 86 22
265 You're the one millionth rider on this elevator! 1.3914 0.03623 327 230 66 31
266 How do you get to Carnegie Hall? 1.3909 0.03414 330 225 81 24
267 Your upstairs neighbor hired us to play her to sleep. 1.3909 0.02656 330 237 79 14
268 Repent! 1.3899 0.03614 318 222 68 28
269 Perhaps you'd like to hear our elevator pitch? 1.3896 0.03387 326 221 83 22
270 We’re going up to see the top brass. 1.3889 0.03400 324 220 82 22
271 I'd take the next one. Some jerk with a flute pushed all the buttons before they got off. 1.3882 0.03357 322 221 79 22
272 Tubas? These are Sousaphones, you philistine. 1.3882 0.03328 322 216 87 19
273 Oh, the 76th Floor. Seen any trombones? 1.3882 0.02959 322 234 70 18
274 You didn't happen to see someone holding a baton, did you? 1.3882 0.03442 322 220 79 23
275 This was a good social distancing technique in high school so we figured we’d try it again 1.3882 0.03580 322 225 69 28
276 Sorry, this is where the horns come in. 1.3875 0.03485 320 222 73 25
277 Going down to c flat. 1.3875 0.03222 320 211 94 15
278 Better get on, the next car’s bagpipes. 1.3875 0.03370 320 216 84 20
279 We took it from the top. 1.3875 0.03370 320 216 84 20
280 He's the oomp--I'm the pa-pa. 1.3875 0.03456 320 219 78 23
281 Step in, there's room. It's just the tuba us. 1.3875 0.03595 320 224 68 28
282 Are you going crescendo or decrescendo? 1.3868 0.03354 318 216 82 20
283 I'd get on. The other elevator has bagpipes. 1.3868 0.03413 318 216 81 21
284 Best social distancing tool ever. 1.3861 0.03368 316 213 84 19
285 Is this car going up a fifth or down a fourth? 1.3861 0.03397 316 214 82 20
286 I specifically told Alexa I wanted two round-trip tickets to ARUBA! 1.3861 0.03542 316 219 72 25
287 Say, you must be our new neighbor. 1.3861 0.03514 316 218 74 24
288 The fuck you lookin' at? 1.3856 0.03796 306 219 56 31
289 We sound better in the stairwell. 1.3854 0.03351 314 211 85 18
290 They said we couldn’t practice in our room. 1.3854 0.03351 314 211 85 18
291 Are you George? Susan sent us to blow you off. 1.3851 0.03627 309 216 67 26
292 Anything special you’d like to hear? 1.3851 0.03539 309 213 73 23
293 Bill.. This is the final test for your new hearing aids 1.3846 0.03365 312 210 84 18
294 When you said,"up or down?" did you mean floor or octave? 1.3846 0.03334 312 209 86 17
295 We don't really know how to play these things. This is just to encourage everybody to stay at home. 1.3839 0.03470 310 212 77 21
296 I played phone booths until I met George. 1.3839 0.03409 310 210 81 19
297 There was nowhere else we could self isolate. 1.3839 0.03470 310 212 77 21
298 Any requests? 1.3831 0.03361 308 207 84 17
299 Is this floor a-one a-two a-three 1.3831 0.03514 308 212 74 22
300 Weirdly enough, you're the odd one out in this situation. 1.3831 0.03265 308 211 80 17
301 It's not your birthday? 1.3831 0.03361 308 207 84 17
302 So, Mr Zamfir, we meet again. But this time the advantage is mine! 1.3831 0.03454 308 210 78 20
303 Check out the weirdo with the man-purse. 1.3824 0.03590 306 213 69 24
304 May we play through 1.3824 0.03437 306 208 79 19
305 No, we don't actually play, but it makes social distancing a lot easier! 1.3816 0.03224 304 200 92 12
306 Yes, my good man, we are going up. And while we are, we'll be getting down. 1.3816 0.03575 304 211 70 23
307 You'll need to march in place if you want to ride with us. 1.3816 0.03388 304 205 82 17
308 Or, you can wait and see what's behind elevator door number two. 1.3808 0.03529 302 208 73 21
309 We're not sure how else to tell you, Greg. You've got to stop going to work. 1.3808 0.03529 302 208 73 21
310 We going to a meeting with the big brass. 1.3800 0.03144 300 204 84 12
311 Are you going up-two-three-four, or down-two-three-four? 1.3800 0.03481 300 205 76 19
312 Welcome. We're taking requests. 1.3793 0.03527 290 198 74 18
313 Of course we can do something by Queen. 1.3792 0.03654 298 209 65 24
314 Admit it... you're not getting in whether we're going up or down. 1.3792 0.03591 298 207 69 22
315 Maestro! We have found you at last. 1.3792 0.03192 298 210 73 15
316 Oh no Herman, another groupie. 1.3792 0.03623 298 208 67 23
317 We're here for the NPR tiny desk contest. 1.3792 0.03528 298 205 73 20
318 It's not about weight; it's about volume. 1.3784 0.03344 296 208 72 16
319 No. No. We insist. 1.3784 0.03511 296 203 74 19
320 We really think our act can make it to the top. 1.3784 0.03344 296 198 84 14
321 He can play "Free Bird," but I can't. I can play "Stairway to Heaven," but he can't. Sorry. 1.3784 0.03057 296 210 74 12
322 Oh good, you brought the sheet music! 1.3776 0.03526 294 202 73 19
323 Trust me, you don't want to wait for the next one. 1.3776 0.03143 294 208 73 13
324 No, really, there's plenty of room-pah-pah. 1.3776 0.03718 294 208 61 25
325 Hey, my eyes are down here! 1.3776 0.03559 294 203 71 20
326 Congratulations your quarantine is over! 1.3767 0.03672 292 205 64 23
327 Did you hear us coming? 1.3767 0.03508 292 200 74 18
328 Don't worry, by the time the air we blow exists, it has already travelled 6 feet 1.3759 0.03314 290 203 72 15
329 They're for social distancing. You'll have to catch the next one. 1.3759 0.03689 290 204 63 23
330 Do you want any elevator music? No? Well, that's tubad. 1.3759 0.03623 290 202 67 21
331 You better try the stairs. There's seventy four more waiting in the lobby. 1.3759 0.03623 290 202 67 21
332 There’s just enough room for clarinet ! 1.3750 0.03504 288 197 74 17
333 Are you the guy who was so impressed by the hotel’s “golden toilet seats” in what he thought was the men’s room?! 1.3750 0.03606 288 203 64 21
334 Got any toilet paper? 1.3741 0.03690 286 201 63 22
335 Hi, we're looking for a Phil Harmonic. 1.3741 0.03656 286 200 65 21
336 It's better than wearing a face mask. 1.3741 0.03587 278 191 70 17
337 A birthday card felt so overdone. 1.3732 0.03464 284 193 76 15
338 I think we can make some room-pah-pah 1.3732 0.03806 284 203 56 25
339 Did you happen to see a bald guy in a tuxedo waving a stick around? 1.3732 0.03605 284 197 68 19
340 We’re working remotely. 1.3732 0.03464 284 193 76 15
341 It's management's way of encouraging employees to take the stairs. 1.3727 0.03495 271 183 75 13
342 Sure, we’ve got room, but only if you know the words to Bohemian Rhapsody.” 1.3723 0.03515 282 193 73 16
343 You think you can waltz in here? 1.3723 0.03656 282 197 65 20
344 It's to enforce social distancing guidelines, sir. 1.3714 0.03457 280 190 76 14
345 I thought you said you knew how to get to Carnegie Hall. 1.3714 0.03567 280 193 70 17
346 Our parents tried to tell us to pick another instrument, but we wouldn’t listen. 1.3714 0.02514 280 209 61 10
347 Mind if we horn in? 1.3714 0.03494 280 191 74 15
348 Any requests before the doors close? 1.3714 0.03344 280 190 78 12
349 It only sounds like I farted. 1.3714 0.03909 280 203 50 27
350 10th floor? We'll accompany you. 1.3714 0.03673 280 196 64 20
351 We’re going up, but just a half-step. 1.3714 0.03567 280 193 70 17
352 You might want to wait for the piccolo section. 1.3714 0.03602 280 194 68 18
353 We are part of Governor Cuomo's Sousaphone task force -- our motto, "Stay home or we'll play music that will make you want to kill yourself!" 1.3714 0.03707 280 197 62 21
354 We are self-intubating. 1.3714 0.03638 280 195 66 19
355 Just what we've been waiting on....a captive audience! 1.3705 0.03690 278 195 63 20
356 Of course you can wait for the next elevator, sir. But I hope you like accordions. 1.3705 0.03472 278 191 72 15
357 If you can’t sing, just clap your hands 1.3705 0.03509 278 190 73 15
358 Wow! Are you stoned too? 1.3705 0.03397 278 189 76 13
359 For good's sake, man. Don't just stand there. MARCH 1.3705 0.03472 278 189 75 14
360 You haven't seen 76 trombones go by, have you? 1.3705 0.03759 278 197 59 22
361 We're just trying to maintain some normalcy during all of this. 1.3705 0.03690 278 195 63 20
362 Did you see which way the parade went? 1.3705 0.03619 278 193 67 18
363 We're bringing elevator music back to its original grandeur. 1.3705 0.03159 278 196 71 11
364 Hidey ho, roomie! Ready for a rip roaring two-week quarantine? 1.3702 0.03883 262 186 55 21
365 Yes , President Trump has developed a new type of respirator . 1.3696 0.03707 276 194 62 20
366 I wouldn't stand there if I were you. 1.3696 0.03449 276 190 73 13
367 The other elevator has more room, but they have bagpipers. 1.3696 0.03372 276 185 80 11
368 We're headed to meet with the top brass 1.3696 0.03562 276 190 70 16
369 I heard there was a meeting of all the top brass... 1.3696 0.03742 276 195 60 21
370 Is this the floor with the lucky bride-to-be? 1.3696 0.03372 276 185 80 11
371 Sorry, but this car’s reserved for the top brass. 1.3696 0.03812 276 197 56 23
372 We’re here from YouTube. 1.3696 0.03742 276 195 60 21
373 The Muzak is on the blink. We were the most annoying replacement the Super could find on short notice. 1.3690 0.03754 271 191 60 20
374 It's called the "Social Distancing Polka." 1.3686 0.03725 274 193 61 20
375 You're lucky. We're in the middle of John Cage's 4'33". 1.3686 0.03652 274 191 65 18
376 We’re backup. Muzak is down. 1.3686 0.03425 274 187 74 13
377 We're here with the Make A Wish foundation. 1.3686 0.03578 274 189 69 16
378 People were complaining about the original elevator music, so here we are. 1.3686 0.03503 274 187 73 14
379 It could be worse, they could be bagpipes. 1.3686 0.03652 274 191 65 18
380 Come on in, the acoustics are great. 1.3686 0.03503 274 187 73 14
381 Hop on! We’re just about to play the corporate anthem. 1.3686 0.02874 274 203 60 11
382 I think there's room for a clarinet or oboe. 1.3686 0.03652 274 191 65 18
383 Going up or gettin down? 1.3676 0.03669 272 190 64 18
384 Ode to Joy . . . you couldn't tell? 1.3676 0.03632 272 189 66 17
385 And you thought march madness was cancelled 1.3676 0.03706 272 191 62 19
386 The 76 trombones are on the next elevator. 1.3676 0.03850 272 195 54 23
387 One of them was saying something, but Bruce wasn’t listening. The constant racket, the sleepless nights...these were the tenants in the apartment above his. Realizing this was his chance to end it all, he quickly reached to open his man purse. 1.3673 0.03784 275 196 57 22
388 So this is hell. 1.3667 0.03611 270 187 67 16
389 It’s very hard to play with a mask on. 1.3667 0.03030 270 191 70 9
390 Don't worry. We've been told to work from home. 1.3667 0.03495 270 184 73 13
391 I’d like to see you carry a tune, pal. 1.3657 0.03779 268 190 58 20
392 HELP! We can't reach the down button. 1.3657 0.03510 268 183 72 13
393 You can horn in if you'd like. 1.3657 0.03666 268 187 64 17
394 We're going down. But just an octave. 1.3657 0.03852 268 192 54 22
395 No, going Umpah. 1.3657 0.03219 268 202 53 13
396 Time to face the Muzak! 1.3657 0.03779 268 190 58 20
397 Can you help us? We’re lost without our conductor. 1.3647 0.03566 266 183 69 14
398 Unless you play a piccolo, this elevator is full. 1.3647 0.03834 266 190 55 21
399 We have room for one piccolo player. 1.3647 0.03605 266 184 67 15
400 It's okay! We were drawn before the pandemic. 1.3647 0.03834 266 190 55 21
401 Do you know how to get to Carnegie Hall? 1.3647 0.03403 266 193 57 16
402 They were out of face masks 1.3643 0.03554 258 176 70 12
403 We're headed for the fourth, the fifth, then a minor fall in this tiny lift. 1.3636 0.03662 264 184 64 16
404 Close the damn door. We’re sheltering in place. 1.3636 0.03501 264 180 72 12
405 Is the White House briefing on this floor? 1.3636 0.03778 264 187 58 19
406 My wife won't let us practice in the apartment. 1.3636 0.03582 264 182 68 14
407 Two tuba or not two tuba, that is the question. 1.3633 0.03895 267 193 51 23
408 Back up six feet or I will John Philip Sousa you to death. 1.3633 0.03570 256 184 56 16
409 Go ahead - come closer than six feet and see what happens 1.3626 0.03346 262 189 60 13
410 9 out of 10 riders prefer it to muzak 1.3615 0.03490 260 177 72 11
411 If you hit floor 12 for us we'll play something uplifting. 1.3615 0.03615 260 180 66 14
412 I hope you’re not in a hurry. There’s 76 trombones ahead of you. 1.3615 0.03574 260 179 68 13
413 The conductor said we needed to elevate our performance. 1.3605 0.03632 258 179 65 14
414 Hey! Eyes down here, bud 1.3594 0.03854 256 185 51 20
415 Don't worry; there's more room since the pianist quit. 1.3594 0.03564 256 176 68 12
416 We find it’s more effective than masks to encourage social distancing. 1.3594 0.03607 256 177 66 13
417 It's how the Germans are beating the Coronavirus. 1.3594 0.03814 256 182 56 18
418 We're just trying to stay an octave away from everyone else. 1.3586 0.03823 251 178 56 17
419 The gig is up. 1.3583 0.03624 254 176 65 13
420 You're safe. These are N95 tubas. 1.3583 0.03624 254 176 65 13
421 Let's take it from the top. 1.3583 0.03667 254 191 45 18
422 Soft Rock or Smooth Jazz? 1.3583 0.03624 254 176 65 13
423 That's a nice pair of hooters 1.3583 0.03833 254 181 55 18
424 Any chance you’re carrying a tune? 1.3583 0.03873 254 182 53 19
425 You want the mindfulness car 1.3571 0.03727 252 177 60 15
426 Elevator music is known to have a calming effect during times of stress. 1.3571 0.03597 252 174 66 12
427 Welcome to Trump Tower. 1.3571 0.03973 252 183 48 21
428 Ah, c’mon—they’re not banjos! 1.3571 0.03727 252 177 60 15
429 Wait! You mean you ordered tuna and not tuba?! 1.3571 0.04013 252 184 46 22
430 Is there anyone on this floor who needs cheering up? 1.3571 0.03769 252 178 58 16
431 Step in. The acoustics are great. 1.3571 0.03508 252 172 70 10
432 The other elevator has the bagpipes" 1.3571 0.03508 252 174 67 11
433 You the jerk in 312 who makes all the cracks about elevator music? 1.3563 0.03862 247 176 54 17
434 We're with the band. 1.3560 0.03788 250 177 57 16
435 The guy upstairs said you needed to face some music. 1.3560 0.03745 250 176 59 15
436 Tuba or not tuba, - that is the question. 1.3560 0.03745 250 176 59 15
437 Tuba? Did you say Tuba? Why don’t you google ‘Sousaphone’ while you wait for the next elevator. Good day. 1.3560 0.03658 250 174 63 13
438 Don't worry! The hearing loss is only temporary. 1.3560 0.03745 250 176 59 15
439 I know, we look like a couple of brass-holes. 1.3560 0.03872 250 179 53 18
440 This elevator is for ‘essential’ orchestra members only. 1.3560 0.03745 250 176 59 15
441 What’s your pleasure, sir? Ship’s horn, whale sounds, or Stairway to Heaven? 1.3548 0.03676 248 173 62 13
442 If this gig is fiercely successful, we plan to blow our way into the escalator scene. 1.3548 0.03631 248 175 60 13
443 Yeah, squeeze in. But BEFORE YOU ASK, no, we don’t know each other. 1.3548 0.03720 248 177 56 15
444 It's the latest thing in social distancing. One blast is all it takes! 1.3548 0.03494 248 178 57 13
445 If you can wait, the piccolo section is in the next car. 1.3548 0.03720 248 174 60 14
446 Our most requested number is "Stairway to Heaven" 1.3548 0.03850 248 179 51 18
447 Do you have a request? 1.3548 0.03720 248 174 60 14
448 Did you notice which way the glockenspiels went? 1.3548 0.03351 248 183 53 12
449 The sound's great. The marching, not so much. 1.3548 0.03764 248 175 58 15
450 We practice sonic distancing. 1.3548 0.03586 248 173 63 12
451 I hope you’re the piccolo. 1.3548 0.03720 248 174 60 14
452 No, going up. We're the top brass. 1.3548 0.03807 248 176 56 16
453 Any last requests before we go marching in? 1.3548 0.03850 248 177 54 17
454 Harold always felt nervous when riding with the top brass. 1.3548 0.03764 248 175 58 15
455 6-feet buddy. Or it's intubation. 1.3537 0.03694 246 172 61 13
456 It's like singing in the shower for tuba players. The acoustics are just amazing. 1.3537 0.03783 246 174 57 15
457 Ya got trouble, ya say. Would that be with a capital T? 1.3537 0.03783 246 174 57 15
458 Judging by the look on your face, I suspect you didn't order a polka-gram online. 1.3537 0.03694 246 172 61 13
459 Just as effective as a N95 mask. 1.3537 0.03738 246 173 59 14
460 After I deliver a one-minute B-flat, my partner will deliver some papers from your wife. 1.3525 0.03846 244 174 54 16
461 Buddy, it’s elevator music. Tuba Tuesdays. 1.3525 0.03802 244 173 56 15
462 A Polka for your thoughts. 1.3525 0.03757 244 172 58 14
463 Step back or we’ll toot! 1.3525 0.03712 244 171 60 13
464 Please stop pressing that button, there is STILL no room. 1.3525 0.03620 244 169 64 11
465 Why does everyone keep asking what were doing with tubas in the elevator? These are obviously sousaphones! 1.3525 0.03757 244 172 58 14
466 We never had to worry about social distancing. 1.3525 0.03525 244 170 64 10
467 What? Not a fan of elevator music? 1.3525 0.03757 244 172 58 14
468 We are the Trump Tower Trumpettes, the tubas you thought you were hearing are fake. 1.3525 0.04017 244 178 46 20
469 We had to practice somewhere! 1.3525 0.03757 244 172 58 14
470 Get in. 1.3525 0.04059 244 179 44 21
471 It's our way of ensuring social distancing 1.3525 0.03802 244 173 56 15
472 We’re practicing our elevator pitch. 1.3525 0.03620 244 174 58 12
473 Tu-ba or not Tu-ba, that is my question. 1.3525 0.03802 244 173 56 15
474 I hope you like smooth jazz. 1.3512 0.03821 242 172 55 15
475 We're enforcing social distancing. 1.3512 0.03589 242 167 65 10
476 Well, it's better than the awkward silences. 1.3512 0.03493 242 165 69 8
477 We have been here since we heard about the "Shelter in Place" order. Please bring food! 1.3512 0.03821 242 172 55 15
478 Hi neighbor we decided to take up the tuba while we shelter in place." 1.3512 0.03541 242 166 67 9
479 Keep back! He's gonna blow! 1.3512 0.03730 242 170 59 13
480 Middle management, meet top brass. 1.3512 0.03821 242 172 55 15
481 We normally play trombones but they kept getting crushed when the doors closed. 1.3512 0.03730 242 170 59 13
482 It guarantees that people will stay 6 feet away from us. 1.3512 0.03776 242 171 57 14
483 Like Trump, we are always Tooting our Horns! 1.3512 0.03589 242 167 65 10
484 Trump sent us. He had this super genius idea to use tubas as ventilators. 1.3512 0.03996 242 176 47 19
485 Yes, we take requests. 1.3512 0.03776 242 171 57 14
486 I'm warning you, that's close enough! 1.3512 0.03776 242 171 57 14
487 What? You thought you ordered two tunas? 1.3512 0.03865 242 173 53 16
488 Because the conductor said we should start on 3. 1.3512 0.03730 242 170 59 13
489 Is the UCLA marching band reunion on this floor? 1.3512 0.03821 242 172 55 15
490 Who did you expect? The New York Philharmonic? 1.3512 0.03865 242 173 53 16
491 Better than 76 trombones. 1.3512 0.03821 242 172 55 15
492 Sure, there's room. If you don't mind listening to 'Dueling Sousaphones' for 25 floors. 1.3512 0.03776 242 171 57 14
493 We'll be rehearsing here until quarantine's over. 1.3512 0.03776 242 171 57 14
494 Taking elevator music to a new level. 1.3512 0.03684 242 169 61 12
495 As the President has said, if anything can make the virus go away it's the sousaphone. So you're twice as safe with us, sir. 1.3504 0.03908 234 167 52 15
496 Because the acoustics in the stairway were terrible. 1.3502 0.03874 237 169 53 15
497 The cello section should arrive in elevator B any second now, but it's the pianist i'm worried about. 1.3500 0.03974 240 174 48 18
498 A new concept in elevator music. Any requests? 1.3500 0.03974 240 174 48 18
499 Would you like to hear our elevator pitch? 1.3500 0.03606 240 166 64 10
500 Live elevator music? No wonder the rent here is so high. 1.3500 0.03930 240 173 50 17
501 Horning in? 1.3500 0.03654 240 176 49 15
502 Do you happen to know which conference room the Narcolepsy Support Group is meeting in? 1.3500 0.03974 240 174 48 18
503 It’s the best way we’ve found to keep people six feet away from us. 1.3489 0.03653 235 163 62 10
504 Speaking for myself, it’s taken years of therapy, but I’m finally comfortable tooting my own horn. 1.3489 0.03941 235 169 50 16
505 Looks like we're the horns of your dilemma. 1.3489 0.03941 235 169 50 16
506 This keeps everyone six feet from us. 1.3489 0.03751 235 165 58 12
507 One or two good blasts and we get all the social distancing we need. 1.3489 0.03847 235 167 54 14
508 Bagpipes? Try the next elevator. 1.3489 0.03800 235 166 56 13
509 Michael? Your secret admirer sends their regards. 1.3489 0.03703 235 164 60 11
510 How does yours fit in such a small bag? 1.3489 0.03800 235 166 56 13
511 Come on in. It's a blast! 1.3487 0.03720 238 167 59 12
512 THIS IS NOTHING. THERE'S 74 TROMBONES RIGHT BEHIND US. 1.3487 0.03767 238 168 57 13
513 Stay at home, or listen to some elevator music. You choose. 1.3487 0.03720 238 167 59 12
514 Just in case someone gets closer than six feet. 1.3487 0.03524 238 171 56 11
515 The flash mob alert didn't say which floor. 1.3487 0.03574 238 164 65 9
516 Threeba? 1.3487 0.03524 238 183 41 14
517 Tipping is entirely optional. 1.3487 0.03720 238 167 59 12
518 You'll have to take the next one, unless that's a piccolo in your pocket, 1.3487 0.03767 238 168 57 13
519 We're taking elevator music to a new level. 1.3487 0.03860 238 170 53 15
520 We're going one octave up. 1.3487 0.03672 238 166 61 11
521 It's a very effective social-distancing instrument. 1.3487 0.03860 238 170 53 15
522 Is this ladies underwear? 1.3487 0.03951 238 177 42 19
523 We're taking requests. 1.3487 0.03370 238 172 57 9
524 At times like this we need to band together 1.3476 0.03594 233 163 60 10
525 Sorry, Bob - this one's just for top brass. 1.3476 0.02880 233 174 55 4
526 The marching band took the stairs. 1.3476 0.04099 233 171 43 19
527 They cancelled the audition due to the virus. 1.3476 0.02228 233 184 42 7
528 They got on on the ninth and the basses are loaded. 1.3476 0.03962 233 168 49 16
529 C'mon in. We're playing some heavy metal. 1.3476 0.03867 233 166 53 14
530 I'll Wait 1.3476 0.03962 233 168 49 16
531 Is that a kazoo in your bag, or are you just happy to see us? 1.3476 0.03915 233 167 51 15
532 Welcome to the future of Elevator Music. 1.3476 0.03819 233 165 55 13
533 One tuba per car? Who knew? 1.3476 0.03962 233 168 49 16
534 We don't do 'Starirway to Heaven'. Got it? 1.3476 0.03671 233 162 61 10
535 We're a heavy metal band and we're here to kick some brass! 1.3476 0.03006 233 178 47 8
536 If you're looking for the 76 trombones, they took the stairs. 1.3476 0.03962 233 168 49 16
537 We've switched to live elevator music. 1.3476 0.03620 233 161 63 9
538 We’re the elevator music. Hope you like heavy metal”. 1.3476 0.03915 233 167 51 15
539 What’d you expect, 76 trombones? 1.3476 0.03410 233 166 58 9
540 It’s safe-our tubas are tied 1.3476 0.03770 233 164 57 12
541 Sure you hear it all the time, but have you heard it LIVE? 1.3476 0.03770 233 164 57 12
542 We figured now was the chance to follow our dreams. 1.3475 0.03540 236 162 66 8
543 Do you know where the Omalley wake is? 1.3475 0.03972 236 171 48 17
544 We're trying to elevate our sound. 1.3475 0.03641 236 164 62 10
545 No, it's fine, we're 6 octaves apart. 1.3475 0.03690 236 167 57 12
546 You go ahead,I am going to wait for the violin section. 1.3475 0.03786 236 167 56 13
547 Muzak is temporarily out of order. 1.3463 0.03689 231 161 60 10
548 We're all sadly working from home these days. 1.3450 0.03908 229 164 51 14
549 When you’ve been married as long as we’ve have you often find yourselves dressed alike. 1.3450 0.03908 229 164 51 14
550 They were advertised as ventilators. 1.3448 0.04197 232 173 38 21
551 Feel free to horn in 1.3448 0.03969 232 168 48 16
552 Oh, we're going wherever you're going... 1.3448 0.03726 232 163 58 11
553 Of course we're going down. Do these look like piccolos to you? 1.3448 0.03825 232 165 54 13
554 Enforcing social distancing, friend. 1.3448 0.03467 232 162 62 8
555 We've been practicing social distancing for years! 1.3448 0.03825 232 165 54 13
556 The practice rooms are being painted. 1.3448 0.03625 232 161 62 9
557 We’re just filling in while the MUZAK’s being repaired. 1.3448 0.03573 232 162 61 9
558 Why yes, we do take requests. 1.3448 0.03676 232 162 60 10
559 Our wives wouldn't let us shelter in place for one more second. 1.3435 0.03427 230 159 65 6
560 We do covers of Arrowsmith tunes, mainly the one about the elevator 1.3435 0.03536 230 174 44 12
561 That's weird. He doesn't have a tuba. 1.3435 0.03745 230 162 57 11
562 ...This is what I get for complaining about the elevator muzak. 1.3435 0.04038 230 168 45 17
563 We're bringing elevator music to a new low. 1.3435 0.03745 230 162 57 11
564 You don't like elevator music or just tubas? 1.3435 0.04038 230 168 45 17
565 What floor and can you carry a tune? 1.3422 0.03797 225 159 55 11
566 People with gas pay us to play during long elevator rides. 1.3422 0.04146 225 166 41 18
567 The Management has decided to change the elevator music 1.3422 0.03950 225 162 49 14
568 Are you the piccolo guy? 1.3422 0.03744 225 158 57 10
569 Up beat or down beat? 1.3421 0.03915 228 164 50 14
570 Sorry, the elevator needs a tune-up. 1.3421 0.03764 228 161 56 11
571 It’s two-fer Tuba Tuesday. Deal with it. 1.3421 0.04060 228 167 44 17
572 If we give you a lift, we’ll get in treble.” 1.3421 0.03964 228 165 48 15
573 You're welcome to come with us while we rehearse. All we ask is that you listen quietly. 1.3421 0.03865 228 163 52 13
574 Have you seen 76 trombones on this floor? 1.3421 0.03606 228 163 55 10
575 Well run back and get it! There's nothing like three tubas in an elevator! 1.3421 0.04012 228 166 46 16
576 Sorry, we can’t start your day on a high note. 1.3421 0.03915 228 164 50 14
577 You’ll have to take the piccolo elevator we only go to the lower floors. 1.3421 0.04154 228 169 40 19
578 We have room if you're a piccolo player. 1.3421 0.03865 228 163 52 13
579 You're not the percussionist, are you? 1.3410 0.03717 217 151 58 8
580 Hope you’re going down. We can’t go any higher.” 1.3408 0.03709 223 156 58 9
581 Every time we share the elevator with Penn and Teller this happens. 1.3408 0.03869 223 162 48 13
582 What floor? We'll pick something from our repertoire based on the length of your ride. 1.3408 0.03869 223 159 52 12
583 The noise is both of us. The smell is him. 1.3396 0.03460 212 159 43 10
584 Please hurry, the International Tuba Convention starts soon on the 3rd floor! 1.3394 0.03727 221 155 57 9
585 Make room? Blow me! 1.3394 0.03782 221 166 42 13
586 Requests? 1.3394 0.03672 221 156 56 9
587 Did 76 Trombones get off on this floor, sir? 1.3394 0.03615 221 153 61 7
588 We're going to the lower floors. You'll want to wait for the piccolos to go higher. 1.3394 0.03727 221 155 57 9
589 Social distancing enforcement. They couldn't get a banjo player on such short notice. 1.3394 0.03727 221 155 57 9
590 Have you seen 102 cornets? 1.3394 0.03889 221 161 47 13
591 This is the express to the audiologist's office. 1.3380 0.03871 213 151 52 10
592 Mind if we play through? 1.3380 0.03695 213 148 58 7
593 Somewhere in the world it's halftime. 1.3380 0.03984 213 153 48 12
594 Did you call for boom service? 1.3379 0.04169 219 162 40 17
595 Come on in, we'll practice quietly. 1.3379 0.03856 219 156 52 11
596 The bass-ment, of course. 1.3379 0.03963 219 158 48 13
597 I knew I should've rehearsed my elevator pitch. 1.3379 0.03963 219 158 48 13
598 We have the same therapist. 1.3379 0.04016 219 159 46 14
599 Come on in. We're just a couple of harmless blowhards. 1.3379 0.03632 219 155 56 8
600 A month ago we would have let you in. 1.3379 0.03963 219 158 48 13
601 Yeah, it's just us. The seventy-six trombones wouldn't fit. 1.3379 0.03856 219 158 49 12
602 You say Level B, I say Level C Flat 1.3379 0.04068 219 160 44 15
603 Did you see 76 trombones go by? We're late. 1.3379 0.04068 219 160 44 15
604 Up a fourth or down a fifth? 1.3379 0.03963 219 158 48 13
605 Come on in--the acoustics are amazing! 1.3379 0.03515 219 159 52 8
606 We just got our marching orders 1.3364 0.03650 217 151 59 7
607 Great! The last step now is to click the "I Agree" button, and we can get going. 1.3364 0.03821 217 156 50 11
608 It was him. 1.3364 0.04091 217 159 43 15
609 If you can wait, the piccolo players will be on the next one. 1.3364 0.03765 217 153 55 9
610 We fell in love with the acoustics. Now we're sheltering in place. 1.3359 0.05038 131 94 30 7
611 Sorry, you can’t use this elevator. We’re going to take it from the top. 1.3349 0.04101 212 155 43 14
612 We never have to share an elevator 1.3349 0.03726 215 151 56 8
613 I don't know...how low can YOU go? 1.3349 0.03841 215 153 52 10
614 Sorry, tubas only! 1.3349 0.03841 215 153 52 10
615 So, what do you think of our elevator pitch? 1.3349 0.03454 215 153 55 7
616 Please take the next elevator, unless you play the piccolo. 1.3349 0.04007 215 156 46 13
617 Nice man purse, weirdo. 1.3349 0.04167 215 159 40 16
618 It’s not fair you had to learn like this, but this is who I am now. 1.3349 0.03897 215 154 50 11
619 You order the tuba on rye?" 1.3349 0.04114 215 158 42 15
620 We heard you were talking shit about John Phillip Sousa 1.3333 0.03955 210 151 48 11
621 You’re in luck. There’s plenty of room. 1.3333 0.04030 213 155 45 13
622 Piccolo players welcome 1.3333 0.03838 210 149 52 9
623 Step back! This next tune is infectious! 1.3333 0.04125 210 154 42 14
624 We're self-isolating from the woodwind section. 1.3333 0.04030 213 155 45 13
625 Seems that there is only room for the tuba of us. 1.3333 0.03918 213 153 49 11
626 Tuba-gram. 1.3333 0.03955 210 151 48 11
627 6 feet dude or you'll be tubaed against the wall. 1.3333 0.02062 210 168 39 3
628 The belt to carry these new toilet rolls is a hassle, but on the upside, we're good to end of this Presidency ! 1.3333 0.04013 210 152 46 12
629 You might want to wait for the piccolos. 1.3333 0.04069 210 153 44 13
630 No need to thank us, just doing our job. 1.3333 0.04084 213 156 43 14
631 Could you press BASS-ment? 1.3333 0.04192 213 158 39 16
632 Congratulations! You're the millionth idiot to push the "down" button on the basement floor! 1.3333 0.04192 213 158 39 16
633 You must be the piccolo. 1.3333 0.03804 213 151 53 9
634 We sound a lot better from the 18th floor. 1.3333 0.03897 210 150 50 10
635 Sorry, this lift's reserved for the big brass. 1.3333 0.04125 210 154 42 14
636 Have you heard the one about two sousaphone players in an elevator? 1.3333 0.03862 213 152 51 10
637 We're just looking for a higher note. 1.3333 0.03838 210 152 48 10
638 Sure, you can take the next one...but it’s dueling banjos. 1.3333 0.03779 210 148 54 8
639 Sorry. This was the only space we could reserve for our rehearsal. 1.3333 0.03862 213 154 48 11
640 You were expecting seventy-six trombones? 1.3333 0.03838 210 149 52 9
641 Antisocial distancing. 1.3333 0.04013 210 152 46 12
642 Six feet, pal, or feel the wrath of big brass! 1.3333 0.04041 210 155 41 14
643 I play piccolo. May I join in? 1.3333 0.03261 210 156 47 7
644 The other 74 took the stairs 1.3333 0.04013 210 152 46 12
645 We're here to help you relax. 1.3333 0.04152 210 157 37 16
646 Nice messenger bag, nerd. 1.3333 0.04179 210 155 40 15
647 They told us to come back with face masks. 1.3333 0.03975 213 154 47 12
648 It’s less fun than it looks. 1.3333 0.03779 210 148 54 8
649 It’s not what it sounded like. 1.3333 0.03918 213 153 49 11
650 Sorry, we booked this for our practice space three weeks ago. You can have it after 10:00. 1.3333 0.03975 213 154 47 12
651 You're welcome to join us, we're just feeling a bit horny 1.3333 0.04179 210 155 40 15
652 I hear heavy metal is going places. 1.3333 0.03897 210 150 50 10
653 We find they're very effective at encouraging proper social distance. 1.3333 0.03918 213 153 49 11
654 You might want to take the next one. Eugene tooted. 1.3333 0.04069 210 153 44 13
655 You are new here right? Welcome to the building, we are your up stair neighbors. 1.3333 0.03955 210 151 48 11
656 No. We're going down. Way,way down. 1.3333 0.03779 210 150 51 9
657 One step closer and we‘ll blow! 1.3333 0.04138 213 157 41 15
658 Oh hi! Meet your new neighbours! 1.3317 0.04204 208 154 39 15
659 Get ready for some live Muzak, motherfucker. 1.3317 0.03674 208 159 38 11
660 What a coincidence! We just moved into the apartment one floor above you! 1.3317 0.03977 208 150 47 11
661 And then we used our busking money to buy a penthouse 1.3317 0.04035 208 151 45 12
662 WE'RE UPGRADING THE ELEVATOR MUSIC 1.3317 0.04259 208 155 37 16
663 Sorry, the Muzak is out. Do you prefer Sousa or Gershwin? We also know a good circus march, but it tends to attract clowns. 1.3317 0.03977 208 150 47 11
664 Come within 6 feet and we'll play Sousa. 1.3317 0.03977 208 150 47 11
665 You don’t have the brass to join us. 1.3317 0.04313 208 156 35 17
666 It's Essential Workers Day. 1.3317 0.03918 208 149 49 10
667 This venue has its ups and downs. 1.3317 0.03736 208 146 55 7
668 This building has elevator music like no other. 1.3317 0.03859 208 153 44 11
669 You don’t mind elevator music, do you? 1.3317 0.03889 208 151 46 11
670 We're practicing our Muzak. 1.3317 0.03918 208 149 49 10
671 Just a lot of hot air trying to reach new heights.” 1.3317 0.03918 208 149 49 10
672 Excuse me, but did you see which way the 76 trombones went? 1.3317 0.03859 208 148 51 9
673 Can you pull us apart? 1.3317 0.04092 208 152 43 13
674 Not exactly your idea of elevator music, is it? 1.3317 0.04035 208 151 45 12
675 Sorry, this six feet of space is already taken. 1.3317 0.03918 208 149 49 10
676 We’re stopping on floors 5, 6, 7, 8. 1.3317 0.04016 205 148 46 11
677 It wasn't me... 1.3301 0.04116 206 151 42 13
678 We were practicing in the stairwell and got kicked out. 1.3301 0.03627 206 145 55 6
679 Social what? 1.3301 0.04000 206 149 46 11
680 It looks like today is your lucky day! 1.3301 0.03940 206 148 48 10
681 There are ups and downs in any great musician's career 1.3301 0.03879 206 147 50 9
682 We still have room for a triangle. 1.3301 0.04230 206 153 38 15
683 If you get any closer we’ll start playing! 1.3301 0.03818 206 146 52 8
684 Mitch McConnell (right) and Marco Rubio (left) discover new ways to spread the Coronavirus. 1.3301 0.04058 206 150 44 12
685 TAKE THE NEXT ONE! ...Sorry, I didn't realize I was shouting. 1.3301 0.04173 206 152 40 14
686 Crescendo? Or diminuendo? 1.3301 0.04000 206 149 46 11
687 Abandon all hope, ye who enter here. 1.3300 0.04039 203 147 45 11
688 It's two-fer, tuba, Tuesday. What's it to 'ya?! 1.3284 0.03900 204 146 49 9
689 You should've thought twice before complaining about the Muzak. 1.3284 0.03962 204 147 47 10
690 Yes I have no bananas. 1.3284 0.03962 204 147 47 10
691 Two tuba players walk out of an elevator. Take it. 1.3284 0.03838 204 145 51 8
692 Should we hold the note for you? 1.3284 0.03774 204 149 46 9
693 You’re gonna love it. The acoustics are fabulous. 1.3284 0.04022 204 148 45 11
694 Can you please direct us to Larry David's office? 1.3284 0.03774 204 144 53 7
695 We're here for the laxative commercial? 1.3284 0.04140 204 150 41 13
696 You probably want the elevator to G for 'garage.' This one goes to G on the bass clef . 1.3284 0.03710 204 155 39 10
697 You’ll have to wait for the next one, we’ve locked horns. 1.3284 0.03962 204 147 47 10
698 What is this, live elevator music? 1.3284 0.04140 204 150 41 13
699 Sorry, this elevator is bass meant only. 1.3284 0.03869 204 148 46 10
700 We moved into the next door apartment!! 1.3284 0.03962 204 147 47 10
701 Well I thought it needed less tuba, more cowbell. 1.3284 0.04082 204 149 43 12
702 Don't worry. Tubas have been deemed an essential service. 1.3284 0.03962 204 147 47 10
703 There's room for a piccolo. 1.3284 0.04082 204 149 43 12
704 Oh, we are essential. 1.3284 0.04198 204 151 39 14
705 The woodwinds took the escalator. 1.3284 0.03962 204 147 47 10
706 The co-op board never actually defined noise. 1.3284 0.03962 204 147 47 10
707 Did 76 trombones get off on this floor? 1.3284 0.03962 204 147 47 10
708 Spotify went down. 1.3268 0.04123 205 151 41 13
709 I’d take the next one if I were you. 1.3267 0.04045 202 147 44 11
710 Did you happen to see a marching band come this way. 1.3267 0.04165 202 149 40 13
711 The Muzak is being repaired 1.3267 0.04106 202 148 42 12
712 You can't go any lower that this. 1.3267 0.03921 202 145 48 9
713 Sorry, pal, you and your man purse can take the stairs. 1.3267 0.03921 202 145 48 9
714 Sorry, this is just the beginning of the parade. 1.3267 0.04224 202 150 38 14
715 Of course we’re going down. We’re tuba players. 1.3267 0.04165 202 149 40 13
716 Is this the quiet floor? 1.3267 0.04224 202 150 38 14
717 Check our this guy’s male purse, Jerry. He looks ridiculous! 1.3267 0.03984 202 146 46 10
718 Yes! We DO know "Smoke on the Water" 1.3267 0.03921 202 145 48 9
719 Helen threw us out, can we practice at your place? 1.3267 0.04045 202 147 44 11
720 You can maintain social distance or listen to a sousaphone concert in an elevator. 1.3267 0.03662 202 141 56 5
721 No, we're Sousa. Mozart is to the left. 1.3267 0.03984 202 146 46 10
722 We have room for a flautist. 1.3250 0.03943 200 146 44 10
723 Going down? We're getting down. 1.3250 0.03943 200 144 47 9
724 No thanks, I think I’ll wait for the string section 1.3250 0.03813 200 144 48 8
725 Since the garbage trucks stopped running, we're here to wake up everybody at 4 a.m. 1.3250 0.04130 200 147 41 12
726 No worries. With tubas, social distancing isn't a problem. 1.3250 0.04006 200 145 45 10
727 It might get a little loud. 1.3250 0.03747 200 141 53 6
728 ...and for some not able to work from home, the band plays on 1.3250 0.03943 200 144 47 9
729 We worked out a new elevator pitch. 1.3250 0.03943 200 144 47 9
730 Muzak had to lay us off, so we're working from home. 1.3250 0.04130 200 147 41 12
731 Tuba sandwich to go? 1.3250 0.03943 200 149 39 12
732 Barry’s plan to revolutionize elevator music was met with resistance. 1.3234 0.04231 201 150 37 14
733 I did order some Band-Aids, but this isn't what I expected... 1.3234 0.04112 201 148 41 12
734 You wouldn't by any chance be carrying a piccolo in that bag, would you? 1.3232 0.03766 198 143 48 7
735 You don't have to say a word. We know we're horny! 1.3232 0.04092 198 145 42 11
736 The elevator company did not pay its monthly Muzak fee. 1.3232 0.03965 198 143 46 9
737 Cash, ass or brass. Nobody rides for free! 1.3232 0.04335 198 149 34 15
738 Thank God, it's the flutist. 1.3232 0.04092 198 145 42 11
739 We'll be here all day 1.3232 0.04092 198 145 42 11
740 If you ride with us you'll get blown away! 1.3232 0.03965 198 143 46 9
741 Oh yes we got trouble, right here in River City, with a capital T. 1.3232 0.03900 198 142 48 8
742 Ride with an alto if you wanna go any higher. 1.3232 0.04335 198 149 34 15
743 There has been complaints about the elevator music, this ones called “I’ll give them something to complain about” 1.3232 0.04092 198 145 42 11
744 The big brass pays a surprise visit. 1.3232 0.03900 198 145 44 9
745 Two-ba, or not two-ba? 1.3232 0.04029 198 144 44 10
746 We're the Stereo Sousaphones---taking elevator music to a whole new level. 1.3232 0.03965 198 143 46 9
747 Yes, we came marching, tuba-two. 1.3214 0.03785 196 139 51 6
748 If you hum a few bars, we’ll try. 1.3214 0.03785 196 139 51 6
749 We got our marching orders. 1.3214 0.03987 196 142 45 9
750 Hot Tuba party in the penthouse! 1.3214 0.03785 196 146 41 9
751 We’re sick of Muzak. 1.3214 0.04179 196 145 39 12
752 Your super bought the "It's all about the bass" Musak package. 1.3214 0.04052 196 143 43 10
753 Going down? No. Getting down! 1.3214 0.03987 196 142 45 9
754 We understand that you're scheduled for a tubal ligation? 1.3214 0.04363 196 148 33 15
755 No, really, how to we get to Carnegie Hall?” 1.3214 0.03785 196 139 51 6
756 Could you press "7" for us, please! 1.3214 0.03921 196 141 47 8
757 Need a live virtual background for your next zoom meeting? 1.3196 0.03874 194 139 48 7
758 It's Fight song Friday's 1.3196 0.03804 194 138 50 6
759 Welcome! Next stop: Hell." 1.3196 0.04204 194 144 38 12
760 The company that provides our elevator music is closed due to the pandemic. What floor sir? 1.3196 0.04009 194 141 44 9
761 We’re working from home, too 1.3196 0.04075 194 142 42 10
762 Sorry, we're trying to get to B, but we keep getting stuck on G. 1.3196 0.04009 194 141 44 9
763 Sorry but we have our marching orders. 1.3196 0.03942 194 140 46 8
764 No, all of his hotels have the same elevator music ...why? 1.3196 0.04075 194 142 42 10
765 Don't worry. We'll send it back bassoon. 1.3196 0.04204 194 144 38 12
766 for whom the horns blow? they blow for you 1.3196 0.04391 194 149 29 16
767 The others got out on seven. 1.3196 0.04204 194 147 34 13
768 Haven't you ever seen heavy metal? 1.3196 0.04267 194 145 36 13
769 Did you order the parade? 1.3194 0.03981 191 138 45 8
770 You never heard of emotional support tubas? 1.3194 0.03981 191 138 45 8
771 Tubas? I don't see any tubas. Of course, if you mean sousaphones, then yes, we are both on the elevator with our sousaphones. 1.3194 0.04184 191 141 39 11
772 Are you sure you wanna wait? The other one only plays elevator music. 1.3194 0.04184 191 141 39 11
773 We're buskers. You pay us not to play. 1.3194 0.04117 191 140 41 10
774 Just so you know, a cartoonist is coming. 1.3194 0.04313 191 143 35 13
775 Actually, it's a sousaphone. 1.3194 0.03981 191 138 45 8
776 No, it's fine. I love elevator music. 1.3194 0.03768 191 135 51 5
777 We're looking for the Sousa wedding. 1.3177 0.04165 192 142 39 11
778 Remember stereo?! 1.3158 0.03771 190 144 38 8
779 For social distancing, nothing's better for getting people out of your way. 1.3158 0.03915 190 139 43 8
780 But you voted for no Muzak in the tenant's meeting. 1.3158 0.03915 190 139 43 8
781 True, if we WERE violinists, there WOULD be room for you. 1.3158 0.04190 190 141 38 11
782 Which floor's Audiology? 1.3158 0.03542 190 139 46 5
783 This was the best blind date ever! 1.3158 0.04448 190 147 27 16
784 No closer than 6 feet, sir, or we’ll have to blow 1.3158 0.04123 190 140 40 10
785 It’s perfect for social distancing. No one wants to be near us. 1.3155 0.03954 187 135 45 7
786 We're the John Philip Sousa Society recording elevator music. 1.3155 0.03652 187 133 50 4
787 Trust me, Marty, chicks dig musicians. 1.3155 0.04235 187 139 37 11
788 Please rejoin the band Bob. We really miss you. 1.3155 0.03954 187 135 45 7
789 I'd take this one. There are 76 trombones in the other one. 1.3155 0.04026 187 136 43 8
790 We're your wake up call. 1.3155 0.04026 187 136 43 8
791 Could you take the next elevator? We're actually practicing social distancing. 1.3155 0.03881 187 134 47 6
792 Tubas always get the shaft... 1.3155 0.03881 187 138 41 8
793 We're delivering a "Tubagram." Which way to the Break Room? 1.3149 0.03880 181 131 44 6
794 It's okay - most of the spit goes into the mouthpiece. 1.3149 0.04329 181 135 35 11
795 Life has its ups and downs, but tubas are basically elevating. 1.3138 0.04216 188 140 37 11
796 We're getting the band back together. 1.3135 0.04192 185 137 38 10
797 Obviously we're going down. 1.3135 0.03902 185 133 46 6
798 This elevator ain't big enough for the tuba us. 1.3135 0.04049 185 135 42 8
799 They stole our shoes because we couldn't get to our wallets! 1.3135 0.03976 185 134 44 7
800 You might have to wait, there are 76 trombones that still need a ride up. 1.3135 0.04121 185 136 40 9
801 Can you help us with our elevator pitch? 1.3135 0.03976 185 134 44 7
802 Did you see a guy in a funny hat and a long stick on this floor? 1.3135 0.03826 185 137 41 7
803 Sir, kindly step back 6ft or we will blow you back! 1.3135 0.04192 185 137 38 10
804 You don't happen to play trumpet, do you? 1.3135 0.03976 185 134 44 7
805 Wait if you like, but the other car has Muzak. 1.3135 0.04121 185 136 40 9
806 We kindly encourage you not to leave your hotel confinement, Sir, or you'll get a taste of live "elevator music". 1.3135 0.04330 185 139 34 12
807 I appreciate your enthusiasm, but you really don’t need to do this every time I take my lunch break. 1.3135 0.04049 185 135 42 8
808 I still think "Tuba or not tuba, that is the question" is funnier... 1.3135 0.04121 185 136 40 9
809 Okay, boomers 1.3135 0.04049 185 135 42 8
810 Which flat? 1.3135 0.04121 185 136 40 9
811 Musical Distancing 1.3135 0.03826 185 132 48 5
812 They finally updated the elevator music.” 1.3135 0.03826 185 132 48 5
813 Thank goodness, it's moving again! I've been stuck in here for 30 minutes with this freak. 1.3135 0.03976 185 136 41 8
814 It won't matter how funny your caption is. There's still no prize. 1.3135 0.04192 185 137 38 10
815 Sorry, but there's no room-pah-pah. 1.3135 0.04330 185 139 34 12
816 Trust me, you wanna wait for the next car. 1.3135 0.04049 185 135 42 8
817 Going up to the fart joke convention? 1.3135 0.04593 185 143 26 16
818 Best elevator music in town. 1.3135 0.03588 185 138 41 6
819 We've run out of face masks, but we've found these work just as well. 1.3135 0.04049 185 135 42 8
820 'Lots of interruptions but the acoustics are great!' 1.3135 0.03826 185 132 48 5
821 We don't play "Misty". How about a little "Stars and Stripes Forever?" 1.3135 0.04049 185 135 42 8
822 We are the instruments of social distance. 1.3135 0.04049 185 135 42 8
823 Catch us on the YouTuba channel. 1.3132 0.04237 182 135 37 10
824 Have you seen a couple of elephants and a majorette? 1.3129 0.04310 163 119 37 7
825 We practice anti-social distancing. 1.3115 0.04288 183 137 35 11
826 Social distance! 1.3115 0.03766 183 142 33 8
827 You can't horn in on us. 1.3115 0.04218 183 136 37 10
828 It’s elevator music. 1.3115 0.03766 183 135 42 6
829 Bassment? 1.3115 0.04073 183 134 41 8
830 The next one has bucket-drummers in it. Pick your poison, man. 1.3115 0.03998 183 133 43 7
831 Don't worry we play quite softly. 1.3115 0.03998 183 133 43 7
832 Have you seen 76 trombones? 1.3115 0.03923 183 141 32 10
833 What's in the bag, weirdo? 1.3115 0.04426 183 139 31 13
834 I hope that's an oboe in your bag. 1.3115 0.04073 183 134 41 8
835 One step closer and we start playing Sousa! 1.3115 0.03998 183 133 43 7
836 What's the matter? You never heard of elevator music? 1.3115 0.03998 183 133 43 7
837 Sorry but we were told to play a little higher. 1.3115 0.03923 183 132 45 6
838 Do you mind if we rehearse? 1.3115 0.03686 183 129 51 3
839 We have room for one triangle player. 1.3115 0.04218 183 136 37 10
840 Keep your distance, or we'll blow you away. 1.3115 0.03998 183 133 43 7
841 We're happy to go up or down. Just step in and give us your request. 1.3115 0.03998 183 133 43 7
842 Yes, we also choose not to wear masks. 1.3115 0.03433 183 137 41 5
843 you know what ill just take the next one 1.3115 0.02963 183 143 36 4
844 So you’re the one who complained about the Muzak? 1.3094 0.04244 181 135 36 10
845 The concierge suggested we try using less band width. 1.3094 0.04315 181 136 34 11
846 Do you happen to have a tuba toothpaste? 1.3094 0.04315 181 136 34 11
847 He found us... Look busy. 1.3094 0.04315 181 136 34 11
848 Well, up your brass too, fellah! 1.3094 0.04386 181 137 32 12
849 It's cumbersome, but we always get an elevator to ourselves. 1.3094 0.03785 181 129 48 4
850 Hi, can you point us to the apartment directly above yours? 1.3094 0.04171 181 134 38 9
851 Social distancing, nobody will come anywhere near us 1.3094 0.03944 181 131 44 6
852 We're trying to start at the bottom and play our way to the top. 1.3094 0.03703 181 128 50 3
853 The piccolo convention would have been far more manageable. 1.3094 0.03703 181 138 37 6
854 Is the upper brass on this floor? 1.3094 0.04386 181 137 32 12
855 The day management changed the elevator music was the same day Jim thanked his StairMaster. 1.3094 0.03944 181 131 44 6
856 If you get in this car, you have to do the chicken dance. 1.3094 0.04097 181 133 40 8
857 He's right behind me, isn't he! 1.3094 0.04171 181 134 38 9
858 We're famous in Wisconsin! 1.3094 0.04021 181 137 36 8
859 And it's whispered that soon, If we all call the tune Then the piper will lead us to reason 1.3094 0.04097 181 133 40 8
860 You might want to grab the next one, we're still working on our pitch 1.3094 0.03944 181 133 41 7
861 The band goes marching tuba two, hurrah, hurrah. 1.3094 0.04097 181 133 40 8
862 It’s NOT A TUBA! 1.3094 0.04097 181 133 40 8
863 Muzak's on the fritz again. 1.3094 0.04097 181 133 40 8
864 We're trying to find somewhere to shelter in place. 1.3094 0.03944 181 131 44 6
865 We've still got room for a piccolo. 1.3094 0.03865 181 130 46 5
866 There’s room. We can always use another blowhard. 1.3090 0.04216 178 132 37 9
867 It's like Tiny Desk, but with better acoustics. 1.3090 0.04291 178 133 35 10
868 Excuse me . . . have you seen seventy-six trombones anywhere? 1.3090 0.04364 178 134 33 11
869 The little bell to let you know when the elevator has arrived isn't working. 1.3090 0.04063 178 130 41 7
870 Wait am I in your delusion or are you in mine? 1.3090 0.04140 178 131 39 8
871 It's Sousa's birthday. We do requests. 1.3090 0.03821 178 127 47 4
872 Singing telegram from your WeightWatchers group! 1.3090 0.04140 178 131 39 8
873 FYI, the percussion section is in the next car! 1.3090 0.04140 178 131 39 8
874 18th floor "can you direct us to Suite 1812?" 1.3090 0.04364 178 134 33 11
875 Tuba or not tuba? We decided the question. 1.3090 0.03984 178 133 37 8
876 The building has invested in live elevator music to encourage people to use the stairs. 1.3090 0.04364 178 134 33 11
877 Do you know what floor the party is on? 1.3090 0.03821 178 127 47 4
878 The acoustics here are topnotch 1.3090 0.04063 178 130 41 7
879 The seventy-six trombones are on the other elevator 1.3090 0.04291 178 133 35 10
880 Tubas company, three's a crowd. 1.3090 0.04216 178 132 37 9
881 You may want to get on, the next one has 76 guys in it. 1.3090 0.04364 178 134 33 11
882 They're even better than banjos to encourage social distancing. 1.3090 0.04063 178 130 41 7
883 You don't really need to go out of the home, do you? 1.3090 0.04216 178 132 37 9
884 No, it's not a tuba joke. Sousaphones. Sousaphones. 1.3090 0.04140 178 131 39 8
885 You have to toot your own horn if you expect to ascend! 1.3090 0.03984 178 129 43 6
886 We're an essential serivice. 1.3090 0.04291 178 133 35 10
887 Our most effective social distancing method yet! 1.3090 0.04140 178 131 39 8
888 You should see where they put the woodwinds. 1.3090 0.04216 178 132 37 9
889 We’re taking requests, but keep it short. We’re only going down two floors. 1.3090 0.03903 178 128 45 5
890 It has its ups and downs, but the acoustics are great. 1.3090 0.03984 178 129 43 6
891 Is the elevator music too loud? 1.3090 0.04063 178 130 41 7
892 We're going oompah. You? 1.3090 0.04436 178 135 31 12
893 Welcome to the elevator. Would you like Bernstein or Bach? 1.3090 0.03903 178 128 45 5
894 Technically, they're sousaphones, but thanks for asking. 1.3086 0.04025 175 127 42 6
895 Can you take the next one? We’re practicing social distancing. 1.3073 0.03885 179 129 45 5
896 Sorry, we don't take requests. But hop in for a kick-ass cover of Smoke on the Water. 1.3073 0.04196 179 133 37 9
897 Must be the geometric progression talking, because people are keeping a full 36 feet from us. 1.3073 0.04270 179 134 35 10
898 Come in if you don't mind us practicing. 1.3068 0.03392 176 135 38 3
899 Mobile intubation unit. 1.3068 0.04393 176 133 32 11
900 This floor is for top brass only. 1.3068 0.03924 176 130 41 5
901 Oh. Tubad there’s no room. 1.3068 0.04165 176 130 38 8
902 Twobas 1.3068 0.04086 176 129 40 7
903 We're now offering live "elevator music". 1.3068 0.04006 176 128 42 6
904 Nothing new. People have been socially distancing themselves from us for years. 1.3068 0.04086 176 129 40 7
905 We find a little Sousa is always good for a lift." 1.3068 0.04165 176 130 38 8
906 She just tooted. Don't come in. 1.3068 0.04006 176 128 42 6
907 Actually, it's "what's a couple of goddamned 'sousaphones' doing on my goddamned elevator!" 1.3068 0.04466 176 134 30 12
908 No. The accordions are in Elevator 3. 1.3068 0.04086 176 129 40 7
909 This one is going to the bassment. 1.3068 0.04318 176 132 34 10
910 How the heck did you get in there in the first place? 1.3068 0.04242 176 131 36 9
911 They didn't have enough money to pay for elevator music so they hired us instead. 1.3068 0.04318 176 132 34 10
912 Only come in if your horny. 1.3068 0.04006 176 128 42 6
913 The penthouse resident was tired of tooting his own horn. 1.3068 0.04318 176 132 34 10
914 Oh, we don't play, it's a social distancing thing 1.3068 0.04006 176 128 42 6
915 You're wife says you need to march upstairs right this minute. 1.3068 0.04086 176 134 33 9
916 A piccoloist! You lucked out. 1.3068 0.03755 176 134 36 6
917 Try to catch the one with the piccolos 1.3068 0.03924 176 127 44 5
918 We'll see you in the morning for your wake-up call. 1.3068 0.04165 176 130 38 8
919 C'mon fellas, it's rude to pass wind in confined spaces. 1.3068 0.04242 176 131 36 9
920 We're an opening and a closing act. 1.3068 0.04165 176 130 38 8
921 When you see the flutes and piccolos, THEN that'll be the last of us. 1.3068 0.04466 176 134 30 12
922 This elevator is going down, that other elevator hits all the high notes! 1.3046 0.04269 174 130 35 9
923 They were out of ventilators. 1.3046 0.04346 174 131 33 10
924 Going down an octave? 1.3046 0.04190 174 129 37 8
925 Come on in, but we're requests only. 1.3046 0.04269 174 130 35 9
926 We're going up to the roof to play some high notes for a change. 1.3046 0.04190 174 129 37 8
927 We call it "The Descent into Hell". 1.3046 0.04029 174 127 41 6
928 Let's all go to the lobby! 1.3046 0.04422 174 132 31 11
929 No tuba, no service. 1.3046 0.04110 174 128 39 7
930 If you weren't carrying that bag, we might have room for you. 1.3046 0.04110 174 128 39 7
931 Going umpa? 1.3046 0.04346 174 131 33 10
932 We have been told to sousaphone-in-place. 1.3046 0.04642 174 135 25 14
933 A post on Facebook indicated that low tones kills the virus. 1.3046 0.03860 174 127 42 5
934 We like to think of it as social distancing insurance. 1.3046 0.04070 174 130 36 8
935 There's room for a flutist. 1.3046 0.04190 174 129 37 8
936 Is there any chance you play the piccolo? 1.3046 0.04269 174 130 35 9
937 No, they're flotation devices you can use as a commode. 1.3046 0.04110 174 130 36 8
938 This should work for social distancing, son! 1.3046 0.04269 174 130 35 9
939 You choose. How about 'A Long and Winding Road'? 1.3046 0.03593 174 135 34 5
940 If this noise doesn't keep people at least 6 feet away from us, nothing will! 1.3046 0.04029 174 127 41 6
941 We'll be playing the Theme from Shaft. It's his idea of a joke. 1.3046 0.04110 174 128 39 7
942 Sorry, HR gave us our marching orders. 1.3046 0.04570 174 134 27 13
943 Providing elevator music was the only job we could get during Covid-19 1.3046 0.04346 174 131 33 10
944 You guys asked for elevator music. 1.3046 0.03945 174 126 43 5
945 Do you know what floor the 76 trombones are on? 1.3046 0.03945 174 130 37 7
946 Don't worry, we take requests. 1.3046 0.04110 174 128 39 7
947 c'mon in... live elevator music is a new gig for us, but I think we've really nailed "Flight of the Bumblebee"! 1.3046 0.04190 174 129 37 8
948 Elevator's full, tu'bad 1.3046 0.03773 174 124 47 3
949 They're not tubas, they're life jackets. 1.3046 0.04110 174 128 39 7
950 They were all out of face masks 1.3046 0.04029 174 127 41 6
951 Wanna horn in? 1.3046 0.04029 174 127 41 6
952 No one suspects the tuba player of corporate espionage. 1.3046 0.03945 174 126 43 5
953 Oh good, the harmonica section’s here. 1.3046 0.04110 174 128 39 7
954 Have you seen my hat? 1.3046 0.04029 174 130 37 7
955 We're filling in while the elevator music strike is on. 1.3046 0.03945 174 130 37 7
956 We lost the key.” 1.3046 0.03304 174 135 34 5
957 You'll want the Piccolo elevator, we only go down from here. 1.3046 0.04346 174 131 33 10
958 We play a mean rendition of 'Girl from Ipanema.' 1.3046 0.04269 174 130 35 9
959 We got tired of people getting in before we exited. 1.3046 0.04190 174 129 37 8
960 It's like elevator music, only with a little more oomph, pah, pah. 1.3029 0.04090 175 129 39 7
961 Everybody except Tuba Players in elevators must stand six feet apart. 1.3023 0.03101 172 127 44 1
962 Well, Jim, the sousaphone club is really the only thing that keeps me going ever since you started fucking my wife. 1.3023 0.04602 172 133 26 13
963 It’s the latest in social distancing. We wanted bagpipes, but they were sold out. 1.3023 0.03791 172 125 43 4
964 Sure, you can wait for the other elevator, but it features bassoons. 1.3023 0.04296 172 129 34 9
965 Yes exactly two. That is how many Tuba conventioneers you can fit into an elevator. 1.3023 0.04216 172 128 36 8
966 You wouldn’t believe the acoustics in here. 1.3023 0.04052 172 126 40 6
967 You'd better take this one. The next car is full of banjos and accordions. 1.3023 0.04216 172 128 36 8
968 There's only space for our two fat brasses. 1.3023 0.04052 172 126 40 6
969 We are the Olaf twins, hired to ensure no one will come within 6ft 1.3023 0.04296 172 129 34 9
970 SOCIAL DISTANCING One step closer and we'll begin to play. 1.3023 0.04374 172 130 32 10
971 Dermatology is on floor 5, but we are here to welcome you on behalf of the ENT department. 1.3023 0.03967 172 125 42 5
972 No, the trumpet elevator goes up; this one goes down. 1.3023 0.03967 172 125 42 5
973 Stop complaining! This could have been the trombone section. 1.3023 0.03880 172 124 44 4
974 Which part of this message is not reaching you: Stay home Self isolate Wash your hands Don’t touch your face 1.3023 0.04374 172 130 32 10
975 I just KNOW we can go lower than B. 1.3023 0.03791 172 123 46 3
976 Mr. Snyder, I believe you donated $20 on GoFundMe to the Homeless Tuba Combo. 1.3023 0.04052 172 126 40 6
977 By the 25th floor, you won't want to get off! 1.3023 0.04451 172 131 30 11
978 Sorry, Muzak is out. We're the temporary replacement. 1.3023 0.04216 172 128 36 8
979 We’re not going up, we’re going to the bass-ment 1.3023 0.04052 172 128 37 7
980 They say elevator music is making a comeback. 1.3023 0.03967 172 125 42 5
981 Since we play bass clef, pretty much all we do is go down. 1.3023 0.04052 172 126 40 6
982 How did you fit yours in your bag? 1.3023 0.04216 172 128 36 8
983 Oh sorry bud, no instruments, no entrance. 1.3023 0.03967 172 130 35 7
984 We think you might be more comfortable with the flautists in the other one. 1.3023 0.04052 172 131 33 8
985 The Philharmonic sent them...social distancing ventilators! 1.3023 0.04216 172 128 36 8
986 This is the express . . . we're trying to beat the band. 1.3000 0.04242 170 127 35 8
987 Going down? I don't know, can you hum a few bars . . . 1.3000 0.04403 170 129 31 10
988 Actually, we wanted the bassment. 1.3000 0.04242 170 127 35 8
989 What floor is the Geico advertising department? 1.3000 0.04558 170 131 27 12
990 You're right George; the boss has zero sense of humor 1.3000 0.03988 170 124 41 5
991 I once opened for KISS. Now look at me... 2nd chair Tuba player in an elevator. 1.3000 0.04242 170 127 35 8
992 We are rehearsing while self- isolating. 1.2994 0.04030 167 122 40 5
993 Oh look Wendy! It’s the guy who goes on and on about the symphony’s “lifeless brass section”. 1.2994 0.04455 167 127 30 10
994 We tested negative but were quarantined anyway. 1.2988 0.04592 164 126 27 11
995 Sorry pal, essential workers only 1.2976 0.04010 168 123 40 5
996 How do we like being elevator music? It has its ups and downs 1.2976 0.03828 168 121 44 3
997 Don't judge. They help encourage social distancing. 1.2976 0.03920 168 122 42 4
998 I know, but she couldn't get anyone to deliver balloons. 1.2976 0.04184 168 125 36 7
999 Unless you're willing to hear the double version of "Go Tell It On The Mountain," you may want to skip this elevator. 1.2976 0.04098 168 129 32 7
1000 Going up will be a big blast ! 1.2976 0.04269 168 126 34 8
1001 Sorry. No roompah. 1.2976 0.04432 168 128 30 10
1002 Sure there's room, but not with that big 'man purse'. 1.2976 0.04432 168 128 30 10
1003 This is a standing-room-only performance. 1.2976 0.04269 168 126 34 8
1004 My dear man, have you by chance come across an orchestra with adequate mid-range and highs but a rather feeble low end? 1.2976 0.04351 168 127 32 9
1005 What are you waiting for? You got something against elevator music? 1.2976 0.04098 168 124 38 6
1006 Shelter in place!? Fine, but we're still having this parade! 1.2976 0.04010 168 123 40 5
1007 What's better than one sousaphone in the stairwell? 1.2970 0.04648 165 128 25 12
1008 Care to accompany us? 1.2970 0.03961 165 120 41 4
1009 What is it Tuba-much for you? 1.2970 0.04486 165 126 29 10
1010 It definitely keeps people six feet away. 1.2970 0.03961 165 120 41 4
1011 Your elevator music will be the theme from "Jaws." 1.2970 0.04053 165 121 39 5
1012 They sound so much cooler when they echo. 1.2970 0.04403 165 125 31 9
1013 You'll have to take the other elevator. This is our work from home studio. 1.2970 0.04231 165 123 35 7
1014 Muzak is on the fritz. 1.2970 0.04403 165 125 31 9
1015 Live elevator music is how we got the fifth star. 1.2970 0.04567 165 127 27 11
1016 It was most important for the tuba thieves that they remain inconspicuous. 1.2952 0.04210 166 124 35 7
1017 Did you here about the tuba player who didn’t make the marching band? He committed sousa-cide! 1.2952 0.04210 166 124 35 7
1018 We're very sorry, but its the only place they'd let us practice. 1.2952 0.03941 166 121 41 4
1019 Management wanted some new elevator music 1.2952 0.04122 166 123 37 6
1020 What do we charge for NOT rehearsing? To quote Chico Marx, you couldn't afford it. 1.2945 0.04346 163 123 32 8
1021 Is this level forte? 1.2945 0.04168 163 121 36 6
1022 That's him, that's the essential worker! 1.2945 0.04168 163 123 33 7
1023 We'd exit, but we're banned from every floor. 1.2945 0.04346 163 123 32 8
1024 The next one should have 2 trumpets. 1.2945 0.03363 163 127 33 3
1025 The rest of the marching band took the stairs. 1.2945 0.04258 163 122 34 7
1026 The subway cello players kicked us out. 1.2945 0.03885 163 118 42 3
1027 The oboists took the stairwell. Go figure." 1.2945 0.04076 163 120 38 5
1028 The record shows I took the blows and did it my way. 1.2945 0.04168 163 121 36 6
1029 Technically, they're "Sousaphones", and you won't hardly even know we're in here. 1.2945 0.03685 163 116 46 1
1030 The acoustics are amazing! 1.2945 0.04258 163 122 34 7
1031 Don't judge. HR told us to use this time to develop new skills. 1.2945 0.04346 163 123 32 8
1032 He’s Oomp. I’m his Pah. 1.2945 0.04432 163 124 30 9
1033 Yes sir, until 10:00 PM. Room Service also delivers string sections. 1.2945 0.04346 163 123 32 8
1034 Whaddaya mean, they sent the wrong order? The regular guys were sick, and the deli said you wanted two tuba subs. 1.2945 0.04517 163 125 28 10
1035 We're taking the elevator music to the next level. 1.2945 0.04346 163 123 32 8
1036 We’re going down to low B-flat 1.2945 0.04517 163 125 28 10
1037 Welcome aboard. We have the best elevator music in town! 1.2945 0.04168 163 121 36 6
1038 Would you like some elevator music? 1.2945 0.03885 163 118 42 3
1039 Any chance you could point us to the ark? 1.2945 0.04681 163 127 24 12
1040 We blew the door off. 1.2937 0.04121 160 118 37 5
1041 I'll wait for the woodwinds 1.2927 0.04323 164 124 32 8
1042 Are you the guy who said the elevator music was too boring? 1.2927 0.03961 164 120 40 4
1043 Sorry, only room for a piccolo player 1.2927 0.04408 164 125 30 9
1044 We have decided to introduce the good folk of this building to live elevator music. 1.2927 0.04055 164 121 38 5
1045 Come on in! Live elevator music on every ride. 1.2927 0.04235 164 123 34 7
1046 March on in. 1.2919 0.04099 161 122 34 5
1047 Muzak is down. 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1048 Why the worried look - there are 76 cornets right behind. 1.2919 0.04003 161 118 39 4
1049 Wait for the flute section if you want to go to the top floors. 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1050 One tuba player says to the other tuba player, ''that was a low blow'!' The other player says, 'Thanks!' 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1051 Sorry, there’s no room-pah-pah. 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1052 They’re having a BOGO in the Sousaphone department. 1.2919 0.04632 161 125 25 11
1053 Elevator music, am I right? 1.2919 0.03855 161 126 28 7
1054 Better take the stairs. Sousaphone convention is in town. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1055 No, we each ordered a tube a glue. 1.2919 0.03701 161 123 34 4
1056 At least they're not banjos. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1057 Haven't you ever seen live Muzak. 1.2919 0.03371 161 119 41 1
1058 Come on in. You're the next guest on 'Two Tubas in an Elevator' podcast. 1.2919 0.03905 161 117 41 3
1059 We like a Sousa tune. How about you? 1.2919 0.04003 161 118 39 4
1060 'I'm sorry we're late for the audition, but my son couldn't find his sousaphone.' 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1061 You didn't see a guy with a big hat and a baton on this floor, did you? 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1062 The next car is filled with deck chairs. 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1063 Is this the floor for the team building exercise? 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1064 You pay good money to live here. The least we can do is step up the elevator music. 1.2919 0.04462 161 123 29 9
1065 yeah-the pied piper guy works for small infestations, but for the larger rodents you need two tubas team. 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1066 Our unit doesn’t have a balcony. 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1067 Sorry, there is only room for a flutist. 1.2919 0.03804 161 118 40 3
1068 Take the next one, it's just the oboe section. 1.2919 0.03905 161 117 41 3
1069 Sorry we're at sax capacity. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1070 Tuba, or not tuba, that is the question, Todd. 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1071 You'll never think of 'elevator music' the same way again. 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1072 Well, if you hum a few bars, we can try. 1.2919 0.03905 161 117 41 3
1073 We’re taking social distancing to the next level 1.2919 0.04003 161 123 32 6
1074 We never go up. 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1075 We're doing the theme from Jaws all over town to help warn the public of the impending doom. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1076 Stay six feet back or this thing's gonna blow. 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1077 Sorry, your bag is too big. 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1078 Welcome to 30 seconds of serenity. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1079 It’s safe. Sousaphone players naturally social distance. 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1080 Since the philharmonic closed, we're moonlighting as social distancing regulators. 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1081 Um Pah Um Pah to you, Um Pah Um Pah to you, Um Pah Um Pah dear Randy Um Pah Um Pah to you. 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1082 Turns out 'Two Tubas' was a typo... 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1083 Sorry going up to E flat 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1084 Sorry, we thought this was the contrabassment. 1.2919 0.03905 161 125 30 6
1085 Excellent acoustics. 1.2919 0.04003 161 118 39 4
1086 We're looking for a large number of trombones. Seventy-six, if you must know. 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1087 The next one should have more room - it’s just trumpets. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1088 I think you should take the stairs, there are 76 trombones yet to come 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1089 Congratulations! You’re the 1,000,000th person to take this elevator! 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1090 Have you tried taking the stairs with a tuba? 1.2919 0.03804 161 116 43 2
1091 We're experimenting with LIVE elevator music. 1.2919 0.03804 161 116 43 2
1092 Going sharp or flat? 1.2919 0.03804 161 125 30 6
1093 And welcome, sir, to Oompah Suites. Be sure to try our incomparable wake-up service. 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1094 They ran out of face masks. 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1095 Sorry, there's no room, but the acoustics are amazing in here! 1.2919 0.04003 161 118 39 4
1096 You may want to wait for the flutes 1.2919 0.04193 161 122 32 7
1097 I hope you play the Flute.” 1.2919 0.03804 161 127 29 5
1098 Hop on; Life's a toot 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1099 Elevator Music by John Philip Sousa 1.2919 0.04462 161 123 29 9
1100 Seventy six trombones? Fifth floor. 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1101 We're here for the Octubafest. 1.2919 0.04548 161 124 27 10
1102 Nobody's getting discovered today, Earl. This flash mob business is rubbish. 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1103 We were hired to replace that ridiculous elevator music. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1104 Looks like someone forgot it was Tuba Tuesday. 1.2919 0.04003 161 118 39 4
1105 We've been keeping people six feet away since the Carter Administration! 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1106 We're going to the bassment. 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1107 Hey, have you seen about 76 trombones get off this elevator recently? 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1108 We're testing out a new feature: elevator music with surround sound. 1.2919 0.03485 161 123 35 3
1109 You might want to get the next one. We practice in here. 1.2919 0.04003 161 118 39 4
1110 Don't suppose you've seen a marching band around here somewhere. 1.2919 0.03905 161 117 41 3
1111 If you'd prefer something more soothing, Burt Bacharach is in the other elevator. 1.2919 0.03804 161 116 43 2
1112 We just came in to touch bass. 1.2919 0.04462 161 123 29 9
1113 Going Ump Pa Pa Ump PaPa? 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1114 Well, the seating isn’t ideal, but you won’t believe the acoustics! 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1115 It might be a while, the conductor just let everyone know we'll be working from home. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1116 Elevator music used to be so boring 1.2919 0.03905 161 119 38 4
1117 The middle elevator is mariachi, if you don't mind a crowd. 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1118 They told us to play something uplifting. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1119 Hey 6ft buddy. I swear one step closer and I will blow it. 1.2919 0.04462 161 123 29 9
1120 We are having treble finding our floor. 1.2919 0.04003 161 118 39 4
1121 This pandemic blows. 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
1122 Sorry - we thought that the company brass were meeting up here. 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1123 Have you heard the word of our Lord in B-major? 1.2919 0.04374 161 122 31 8
1124 It's a new policy. For some reason the Co-Op Board seems to think that tuba-distancing will be more effective than social distancing. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
1125 Our tooting keeps everyone at least 6 feet away! 1.2919 0.03905 161 119 38 4
1126 We go as high as our pitch allows. 1.2919 0.04462 161 123 29 9
1127 Bill, how can we be an elevator tuba trio if you keep forgetting your instrument? 1.2919 0.04284 161 121 33 7
1128 Actually, "social distance" has never been an issue for tuba players. 1.2917 0.04609 144 109 28 7
1129 We're headed up to see the top brass. 1.2893 0.04025 159 117 38 4
1130 Just until Muzak comes back up. Any requests? 1.2893 0.04492 159 122 28 9
1131 I would use the stairs, the piano is coming. 1.2893 0.04403 159 121 30 8
1132 The acoustics are really great. 1.2893 0.04311 159 120 32 7
1133 God I hate elevator music! 1.2893 0.04403 159 123 27 9
1134 Is this the floor for the Narcolepsy Symposium? 1.2893 0.04403 159 121 30 8
1135 Promise! We won't play a note while you are in. 1.2893 0.04122 159 118 36 5
1136 You've been served 1.2893 0.03716 159 114 44 1
1137 This is live elevator music 1.2893 0.04025 159 117 38 4
1138 Sorry, no room unless you just play the piccolo. 1.2893 0.04218 159 119 34 6
1139 I understand the big rolls of toilet paper, but why are you hoarding swimming rings? 1.2893 0.04311 159 120 32 7
1140 They told us there’s not going to be a college football season this year. 1.2893 0.04311 159 120 32 7
1141 If you’re trying to get to Carnegie Hall, it’s this way. 1.2893 0.04122 159 122 30 7
1142 Sorry, pal — this elevator is for brass only. 1.2893 0.04218 159 119 34 6
1143 We've been sheltering in place! Use the stairs. 1.2886 0.04395 149 112 31 6
1144 That's John behind me. I'm Philip. Are you Sousa? 1.2886 0.04596 149 114 27 8
1145 We’re the new elevator music. 1.2885 0.04267 156 117 33 6
1146 Elevator music, another good idea, in theory 1.2875 0.04195 160 120 34 6
1147 Muzak's broken. 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1148 We figured it was the most effective way to keep social distance. 1.2866 0.03839 157 121 31 5
1149 You may want to wait for the piccolo section. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1150 It's the Corona Duet! 1.2866 0.04612 157 122 25 10
1151 Did you happen to see seventy six trombones on this floor? 1.2866 0.04432 157 120 29 8
1152 And they double as social distancing suits. 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1153 Don't worry; they have filters. 1.2866 0.04046 157 118 34 5
1154 Woodwinds? Next car. 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1155 Six feet away or we'll blow our tops! 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1156 Have you forgotten your Tuba? 1.2866 0.04146 157 117 35 5
1157 Do you have any idea what "shelter in place" all day means in a small apartment with two tuba players? 1.2866 0.03839 157 114 41 2
1158 This is to inform you we have cleaned the elevator with wipes. 1.2866 0.04339 157 119 31 7
1159 Keep your distance! 1.2866 0.04146 157 117 35 5
1160 We are willing to do what it takes to have 6 feet of social distancing! 1.2866 0.03620 157 120 34 3
1161 This elevator’s only for the BIG BRASS, buddy. 1.2866 0.04146 157 117 35 5
1162 Get the next one we are rehearsing. 1.2866 0.03944 157 117 36 4
1163 The acoustics are better in here 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1164 My wife and I have social distancing horns and we're not afraid to use them! 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1165 Which floor is tuba removal? 1.2866 0.04432 157 120 29 8
1166 We don't play.They just keep us at a social distance. 1.2866 0.04243 157 120 30 7
1167 We forgot the key. 1.2866 0.04523 157 121 27 9
1168 I thought there was only ONE politician that has to Blow his own horn all the time... 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1169 That wasn't a fart, it's safe to come in. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1170 We’re going upstairs to pitch “YouTuba” to investors. Wanna come, too? 1.2866 0.04146 157 117 35 5
1171 Sorry. We can’t go up. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1172 Sorry buddy — auditions are closed. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1173 If anyone should ask...the answer is twenty flutists, or eleven violinists, or two tuba players. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1174 S'matter, Mac, never seen two Sousaphones in a elevator before? 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1175 I can see you're not part of the convention. 1.2866 0.04146 157 117 35 5
1176 Whew. What a relief. We were worried about fitting a third tuba in here. 1.2866 0.03839 157 114 41 2
1177 Just when I thought elevator rides couldn't get more awkward. 1.2866 0.03620 157 122 31 4
1178 They sure are taking elevator music to a whole new level! 1.2866 0.04046 157 118 34 5
1179 I'd advise you to stay 6 feet back. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1180 You might want to let it air out for a minute. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1181 Just doing our part for social distancing. 1.2866 0.04146 157 117 35 5
1182 Bagpipes? That's the other elevator. 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1183 We're trying a new take on elevator music. 1.2866 0.03944 157 115 39 3
1184 We're providing positive air pressure. 1.2866 0.04339 157 119 31 7
1185 This meets building code until the automated bell is fixed 1.2866 0.04146 157 119 32 6
1186 Step into euphonium 1.2866 0.04612 157 122 25 10
1187 Press up, would you? The Doppler effect is awesome at the end. 1.2866 0.04339 157 119 31 7
1188 Sure, make fun but this is the safest place in America! 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1189 Will you be wanting Oompah or smooth jazz? 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1190 The roof top concert starts at 7pm. Balcony seats only! 1.2866 0.03620 157 121 32 4
1191 May I horn in? 1.2866 0.04146 157 117 35 5
1192 ‘..or press L for easy listening.’ 1.2866 0.03731 157 113 43 1
1193 Sorry, we're holding it for the drum corps. 1.2866 0.04146 157 117 35 5
1194 We've got room if you've got ear plugs. 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1195 Muzak is out of order. 1.2866 0.04339 157 119 31 7
1196 There's 74 more waiting downstairs. 1.2866 0.04046 157 119 33 5
1197 Tuba be or not tuba be 1.2866 0.04786 157 124 21 12
1198 Sorry... This elevator is reserved for just us “Top Brass” 1.2866 0.04339 157 119 31 7
1199 The drummers are Zooming in from home. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1200 Oh, we’re not going up; this is our rehearsal space. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1201 No worries, the acoustics are better when the doors close. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1202 It’s an intimate audience but the acoustics are amazing. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1203 We're delivering two more ventilators from the President! 1.2866 0.04523 157 121 27 9
1204 Come on, Ed. We’re fortunate enough to be able to work from home. 1.2866 0.04432 157 120 29 8
1205 Take a picture it’ll last longer. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1206 We're looking for the Sousa's apartment. 1.2866 0.03731 157 113 43 1
1207 Basically, the sousaphone is a tuba. The difference is that the instrument will fit around your body. One might wonder why it is called the sousaphone when it is basically a tuba. The instrument is named after..." "I will wait for the next one." 1.2866 0.04339 157 119 31 7
1208 Oh no! We’re in treble. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1209 We've had great success where drugs haven't worked. 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1210 This hotel hired us for wake up calls. 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1211 For twenty bucks, we won’t play ‘Flight of the Bumblebee’ on your way up 1.2866 0.04339 157 119 31 7
1212 We’re here to resolve your complaint about the current elevator music. 1.2866 0.03731 157 113 43 1
1213 Tubas are on the ground floor. You will find piccolos higher up. 1.2866 0.04339 157 119 31 7
1214 Ever hear “Dueling Banjos” played on two Sousaphones in an elevator? Well... neither have we. 1.2866 0.04432 157 120 29 8
1215 Have you seen anyone with a French horn? 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
1216 We're here for the W.H.O ventilator tryouts. 1.2866 0.04612 157 122 25 10
1217 You social distance your way and we’ll do it ours! 1.2866 0.04046 157 116 37 4
1218 We're here to entertain the folks in the intensive care unit. 1.2857 0.04293 154 116 32 6
1219 You can catch us on YourTube 1.2857 0.04391 154 117 30 7
1220 Floor, please? And a one and a two. . . 1.2857 0.04293 154 116 32 6
1221 It was the only way we could maintain 6 feet of space in this city. 1.2857 0.04487 154 118 28 8
1222 We received complaints about the drab elevator music. 1.2857 0.04391 154 117 30 7
1223 This elevator is reserved for the top brass. 1.2857 0.04439 154 120 25 9
1224 Plenty of room for another elevator music aficionado. 1.2857 0.03878 154 117 33 4
1225 Suzy phoned, is she still in? 1.2857 0.04193 154 115 34 5
1226 They said to keep at least a tuba-length away from each other. 1.2857 0.04193 154 115 34 5
1227 Don’t tell me— You knew this day would come. 1.2857 0.04487 154 118 28 8
1228 Yes Sir, this is an upgrade exculsive to The Trump Hotel. 1.2857 0.04293 154 116 32 6
1229 Next we'd like to play the Bert Kaempfert version of "A Theme From a Summer Place". 1.2857 0.04193 154 115 34 5
1230 Sorry -- our masks are at the cleaners. 1.2857 0.04193 154 115 34 5
1231 You'll have a blast! 1.2857 0.04293 154 116 32 6
1232 Im sorry sir,you may experience some Tubalence while using this elevator. 1.2857 0.04293 154 116 32 6
1233 Welcome to elevator #3. We’re tonight’s entertainment! 1.2857 0.03652 154 110 44 0
1234 Its the new busking; we stop when you tip 1.2857 0.04487 154 118 28 8
1235 Up on the Roof" is the name of the song? 1.2857 0.03878 154 120 29 5
1236 If they had to lay me off, an email would have sufficed. 1.2848 0.04734 151 118 23 10
1237 Yes, that's right, son. So now you know. Please don't tell your mother. It would just kill her. 1.2839 0.04554 155 120 26 9
1238 'We left the women in the cartoon upstairs.' 1.2839 0.04366 155 118 30 7
1239 Sorry, I don't think we have the bandwidth to let you in 1.2829 0.04218 152 114 33 5
1240 I’ll wait for the next one, I want Kenny G. 1.2829 0.04613 152 118 25 9
1241 No, we’re going to 14. Some prick from woodwinds hit ever floor button. 1.2829 0.04517 152 117 27 8
1242 Did you order a couple of lifebuoys and a giant pair of binoculars? 1.2829 0.04888 152 121 19 12
1243 #MeTuba prophylactic gear for when you need a little extra space. 1.2829 0.04420 152 116 29 7
1244 What do you think of the live elevator music upgrade ? 1.2829 0.04517 152 117 27 8
1245 Step in, bub. Just be aware that me an’ my brother Arvin will be practicing on these beauties up through the 81st floor. 1.2829 0.04517 152 117 27 8
1246 To enforce physical distancing, the city has mandated protective marching tubas in elevators. 1.2829 0.04613 152 118 25 9
1247 ...and by the way, asshole, it’s a sousaphone, not a tuba. 1.2829 0.04420 152 116 29 7
1248 We’re headed to the top floor. It’s reserved for the big brass. 1.2829 0.04320 152 115 31 6
1249 Could you direct us to the apartment of the guy who placed an online order for a twin tuba-charger? 1.2829 0.04613 152 118 25 9
1250 Sorry, this elevator's only for the top brass. 1.2829 0.04706 152 119 23 10
1251 We're here to change your perception about elevator music... 1.2829 0.04218 152 114 33 5
1252 You can’t bring that satchel on here. 1.2829 0.04420 152 116 29 7
1253 The Latin plural is "tube." 1.2829 0.04420 152 116 29 7
1254 May we suggest a ninth floor favorite, Strike Up The Band? 1.2829 0.04420 152 116 29 7
1255 Well, what you were you expecting? 76 trombones! 1.2829 0.04320 152 115 31 6
1256 Stop, don’t come in, we’re quarantined! 1.2810 0.04091 153 116 32 5
1257 Sorry, your man purse, it's - annoying. 1.2800 0.04449 150 115 28 7
1258 Tubas have been repelling the opposite sex from us for long enough, figured we'd use it for social distancing too. 1.2800 0.04243 150 113 32 5
1259 Any chance you play piccolo? 1.2800 0.03678 150 112 36 2
1260 It's been out of service for hours but the acoustics are very good. 1.2800 0.04549 150 116 26 8
1261 These are sousaphones, man. We can't go up! 1.2800 0.04347 150 114 30 6
1262 I'd take the next one unless you want your ears ringing for three weeks. 1.2800 0.04449 150 115 28 7
1263 Going up, but this car does enforce social distancing. 1.2800 0.04449 150 115 28 7
1264 We're not really excited about it either. 1.2800 0.03678 150 112 36 2
1265 Don't worry, we live together. 1.2800 0.04347 150 114 30 6
1266 Don’t you look foolish without your Sousaphone? 1.2800 0.04347 150 114 30 6
1267 Wrong floor. Tuba competition is on the next floor. 1.2800 0.03798 150 115 31 4
1268 Ready, Aim, ! 1.2800 0.04549 150 116 26 8
1269 Do join us. You'll have a blast. 1.2800 0.04549 150 116 26 8
1270 Muzak is down so we're taking requests. 1.2800 0.04347 150 114 30 6
1271 Don't make me use this thing! Stay six feet back! 1.2800 0.04449 150 115 28 7
1272 Sorry, we only play on even floors 1.2800 0.04549 150 116 26 8
1273 Elevator music man, it's what we do" 1.2800 0.04449 150 115 28 7
1274 Did you order two tubas to go? 1.2800 0.04449 150 115 28 7
1275 We're taking elevator music to new heights. 1.2800 0.04549 150 116 26 8
1276 Give us $20 and we won't play our tubas while you ride the elevator! 1.2800 0.04549 150 116 26 8
1277 Sorry, this one only goes to the bassment. 1.2800 0.04449 150 115 28 7
1278 Heading to the Bass ment 1.2800 0.04347 150 114 30 6
1279 TUBAd the elevator's full. 1.2800 0.04347 150 114 30 6
1280 Best not come in just now...we're about to play a duet. 1.2800 0.04136 150 112 34 4
1281 We take elevator music to a whole new level 1.2800 0.04646 150 117 24 9
1282 Sure! We know "Don't Stand So Close to Me." 1.2800 0.04549 150 116 26 8
1283 We want to change your mind about elevator music. 1.2800 0.04027 150 111 36 3
1284 You might want to give it twelve feet. 1.2800 0.04243 150 113 32 5
1285 We’re Muzak’s worst nightmare. 1.2800 0.04347 150 114 30 6
1286 Who do you want to block out hearing? We are here to help 1.2800 0.04449 150 115 28 7
1287 Actually there are three of us. 1.2789 0.04401 147 112 29 6
1288 I ordered only one. 1.2789 0.04401 147 112 29 6
1289 In nice hotels, the elevator music is live and takes requests. 1.2789 0.04128 147 112 30 5
1290 We miss the trio. Without you, we're just the two-bas. 1.2789 0.04401 147 112 29 6
1291 Welcome to the eighth circle of Hell, where there is nowhere to hide your farts and this god-awful elevator music never stops playing. 1.2789 0.04184 147 110 33 4
1292 These are the most advanced toilets ever made. 1.2789 0.04608 147 114 25 8
1293 Our crescendo still only got us to the second floor. 1.2789 0.04401 147 112 29 6
1294 We're here to fix your toilet seats. 1.2789 0.04708 147 115 23 9
1295 No sir ,nobody farted, Lawrence had a sticky key. 1.2789 0.04505 147 113 27 7
1296 From our cold, dead hands. 1.2789 0.04806 147 116 21 10
1297 This elevator is going straight down to Hell. We’re the band. 1.2789 0.04608 147 114 25 8
1298 Do you blow or fiddle with your instrument ? 1.2789 0.04401 147 112 29 6
1299 It's a Life Preserver. It's a Tuba. All in one! 1.2789 0.04401 147 114 26 7
1300 But we thought you said you needed test tubas!! 1.2781 0.04423 151 116 28 7
1301 We're the pied tuba players, we're here to get rid of the rats on your floor." 1.2781 0.04113 151 122 21 8
1302 It’s like Muzak, only louder. 1.2781 0.04004 151 112 36 3
1303 I hear you buddy. The trombones kicked us out of the last elevator too. 1.2770 0.04269 148 112 31 5
1304 Management heard your complaints about the elevator music. 1.2770 0.04160 148 111 33 4
1305 It'll be a while -- there's a 100 piece marching band coming down behind us. 1.2770 0.04580 148 115 25 8
1306 Care for some elevator music? 1.2770 0.04269 148 112 31 5
1307 Be careful. This hospital ran out of PPE but they're trying to keep everyone entertained. 1.2770 0.04048 148 110 35 3
1308 There’s room for a piccolo in the back. 1.2770 0.03814 148 108 39 1
1309 We're the elevator music. 1.2770 0.04375 148 113 29 6
1310 We're better than elevator music. We take requests. 1.2770 0.04269 148 112 31 5
1311 Going up? Tu-bad. 1.2770 0.04160 148 111 33 4
1312 Her singles ad said "Seeking YouTube" stars, not "You Tuba" stars. Some Miss Fancy Pants you have living here! 1.2770 0.04160 148 111 33 4
1313 The Muzak system is down. Hop on. 1.2770 0.04269 148 112 31 5
1314 Wait, I thought our entrance wasn’t until the next floor! 1.2770 0.04375 148 113 29 6
1315 Any requests for your elevator music? 1.2770 0.04375 148 113 29 6
1316 That’s totally TUBAular bro! 1.2770 0.04048 148 112 32 4
1317 What would you like to hear? 1.2770 0.04048 148 110 35 3
1318 Be warned! We don't put up with farters. 1.2770 0.04048 148 118 23 7
1319 The funeral was amazingly short. 1.2770 0.04580 148 115 25 8
1320 First it's a guy in a snorkel, then a guy in a scuba outfit, now two douchebags are trying to use Tubas in place of N95 masks. Fuck man, go ahead. I'll get the next one. 1.2770 0.04580 148 117 22 9
1321 You're lucky. The accordions got off on the last floor. 1.2770 0.04580 148 115 25 8
1322 You guys dress pretty loud! 1.2770 0.04777 148 117 21 10
1323 Come on in, the instrument has a built-in social distancing feature. 1.2770 0.04479 148 114 27 7
1324 Listen. You carry a tuba, you’re already doing social distancing. 1.2770 0.04048 148 110 35 3
1325 We are tubas. Of course we’re going down. 1.2770 0.04375 148 113 29 6
1326 ... and the Thompson Tuba Twins nail social distancing. 1.2770 0.03932 148 109 37 2
1327 Think of it as eco-friendly pest control. 1.2770 0.04375 148 113 29 6
1328 The Muzak is down. Would you prefer "Girl from Ipanema" or "Wichita Lineman" 1.2770 0.04375 148 113 29 6
1329 This is tuba much elevator music 1.2770 0.04160 148 111 33 4
1330 Up or down? 1.2770 0.04580 148 115 25 8
1331 We found that this does insure social distancing when we're out and about. 1.2770 0.04160 148 111 33 4
1332 We play elevator music. What would you like to hear? 1.2770 0.03932 148 115 28 5
1333 We're on our way to the Battle of Little Big Horn. 1.2770 0.04269 148 112 31 5
1334 Oh hey Eric, you may want to catch the next one, we haven't disinfected our tubas yet. 1.2770 0.03691 148 114 31 3
1335 Tuba-ee or not tuba-ee, that is the question. 1.2770 0.04479 148 114 27 7
1336 LOUD IS A RELATIVE CONCEPT. 1.2770 0.04160 148 111 33 4
1337 You're welcome to squeeze in. But I gotta warn you, we're practicing the shark theme from Jaws. 1.2770 0.04375 148 113 29 6
1338 We can squeeze you in if you play the piccolo. 1.2770 0.04375 148 113 29 6
1339 Going up tempo? 1.2759 0.04208 145 109 32 4
1340 What number? 1.2759 0.04208 145 109 32 4
1341 Come on in, we're havin' a blast!" 1.2759 0.04429 145 111 28 6
1342 Elevator music at its finest. 1.2759 0.04641 145 113 24 8
1343 You were expecting trombones? 1.2759 0.04429 145 111 28 6
1344 You're late. I already gave her the divorce papers" 1.2759 0.04429 145 111 28 6
1345 ...as low as you want to go! 1.2759 0.04641 145 113 24 8
1346 Oh the Saints are marching in on the 4th Floor. Care to join? 1.2759 0.04429 145 111 28 6
1347 Good God, you dunce! They’re sousaphones! 1.2759 0.04092 145 108 34 3
1348 OK so we’re not six feet apart. You try it! 1.2759 0.04092 145 110 31 4
1349 We’re just a couple of Blowhards. 1.2740 0.04509 146 113 26 7
1350 Blowing Up ? 1.2740 0.04714 146 115 22 9
1351 You might want to avoid the rooftop bar. 1.2740 0.04613 146 114 24 8
1352 We're going to the roof to herald the angels to save us from this pandemic. 1.2740 0.04509 146 113 26 7
1353 Top brass... going up 1.2740 0.04294 146 111 30 5
1354 Sorry! We’re just blowing through town. 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1355 Going oom pa pa? 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1356 No, no, this is the tuba car. Saxophones are at 11:39. 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1357 Do you mind? We are trying to make a TikTok! 1.2740 0.04294 146 111 30 5
1358 Tubad, no room 1.2740 0.04613 146 114 24 8
1359 Going Polka? 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1360 Aren't you bringing the pipe organ? 1.2740 0.04613 146 114 24 8
1361 No, Sousaphones. Tubas are in shaft 6 1.2740 0.04294 146 111 30 5
1362 Oh, chill. Percussion is already up there. 1.2740 0.04183 146 113 28 5
1363 Yes, but it has great acoustics. 1.2740 0.04183 146 110 32 4
1364 Sure we take requests! How about 'Up, Up and Away" 1.2740 0.04509 146 113 26 7
1365 That’s not six feet. 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1366 Unless you play the piccolo, better to wait for the next one. 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1367 Going down. Way down. 1.2740 0.04068 146 116 24 6
1368 Of course we’re going down. The up elevators have flutes. 1.2740 0.04509 146 113 26 7
1369 The acoustics in here are amazing. 1.2740 0.04068 146 109 34 3
1370 But it's more fun with sound effects. 1.2740 0.04509 146 113 26 7
1371 Sorry we have to fit 74 more of us in here. 1.2740 0.04509 146 113 26 7
1372 Welcome! Do you wanna go up? Down? Or round and round? 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1373 It's the only way the two of us could ensure social distancing on the elevator. 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1374 new elevator music again? 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1375 We're helping out during the ventilator shortage. 1.2740 0.04294 146 111 30 5
1376 Epic Fails of the Witness Protection Program 1.2740 0.04613 146 114 24 8
1377 Haven't you ever heard of elevator music? 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1378 The sousaphones ensure we're six feet apart. 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1379 The Muzak service went down. 1.2740 0.04509 146 113 26 7
1380 We call it our 'social distanceizer" 1.2740 0.04183 146 110 32 4
1381 Did you press “oompa?” 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1382 They're sousaphones, not tubas, and no, they don't double as flotation devices. 1.2740 0.04294 146 111 30 5
1383 How far down do you want to go? 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1384 Can you call us a Tuber? 1.2740 0.04294 146 111 30 5
1385 Is it here where we can toot our own horn? 1.2740 0.04068 146 111 31 4
1386 This new tune will blow you away! 1.2740 0.04509 146 113 26 7
1387 We're Elevator Music live ... but stand back 6' to listen. 1.2740 0.04068 146 109 34 3
1388 It’s a little tiresome but it sure helps with social distancing. 1.2740 0.04183 146 110 32 4
1389 They were having a buy one get one free special at the gift shop. 1.2740 0.04714 146 115 22 9
1390 Wanna jam in here with us? 1.2740 0.04509 146 113 26 7
1391 Don’t do it 1.2740 0.04403 146 112 28 6
1392 Back to your apartment, sir. 1.2740 0.04456 146 115 23 8
1393 Do you know what floor the meditation room is on? 1.2734 0.04658 139 108 24 7
1394 We can squeeze you in, if you hate yourself. 1.2727 0.04674 143 112 23 8
1395 We're here to oom-pah-pah you right back into self-quarantine, buster. 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1396 We'll be done shortly…it's the Minute Waltz. 1.2727 0.04568 143 111 25 7
1397 Don't you just hate that canned elevator music? 1.2727 0.04114 143 107 33 3
1398 If you don't know the difference between a Sousaphone and a tuba, there's no room for you on this elevator. 1.2727 0.04347 143 109 29 5
1399 Requests $5. Saints $20 and no marching. 1.2727 0.04114 143 107 33 3
1400 Elevator operating for business, tuba playing for pleasure. 1.2727 0.04568 143 111 25 7
1401 So, Mac ... How about 'It's a Small World, after all...' ? 1.2727 0.04568 143 111 25 7
1402 Yeah, it's kinds cramped, but the reverb's terrific! 1.2727 0.04232 143 108 31 4
1403 Elevator music for your Elevator pitch! 1.2727 0.04674 143 112 23 8
1404 We’re practicing social distancing 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1405 Strings? Next car. 1.2727 0.04232 143 108 31 4
1406 No, you don’t come in on four. 1.2727 0.04232 143 108 31 4
1407 You know that saying about 2 people breaking wind in an elevator, well, you'll never know ! 1.2727 0.04232 143 108 31 4
1408 They were out of masks. 1.2727 0.04568 143 111 25 7
1409 We were social distancing before it was popular. 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1410 No one likes elevator music. We give them a reason. 1.2727 0.03992 143 111 28 4
1411 No, these are not prototype wearables. 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1412 Larry decided to wait for the next ride, hoping it would have more subtle elevator music 1.2727 0.04232 143 108 31 4
1413 Maybe take the next one? This one only goes up to the top brass. 1.2727 0.04568 143 111 25 7
1414 Come right on in. We're having a blast! 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1415 You look tired . Do you want us to wake you up? 1.2727 0.04568 143 111 25 7
1416 Is Oom Pah Pah Industries on this floor? 1.2727 0.04114 143 107 33 3
1417 Don't worry mate, we can reach your flat going down or up. 1.2727 0.04568 143 111 25 7
1418 It's a good gig. Has its highs and lows. Mostly lows. 1.2727 0.04114 143 107 33 3
1419 Please help us, we can’t reach the buttons. 1.2727 0.04114 143 107 33 3
1420 Musical Stay In Place Enforcement Squad. 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1421 Not sure if I can horn my way in there. 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1422 And oompah to you, buddy. Now wait for the mellophones. 1.2727 0.04568 143 111 25 7
1423 Nothing personal but Sousaphones are notoriously difficult to sanitize. 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1424 OK. That's enough practice. Is this the way to Carnegie Hall? 1.2727 0.04114 143 107 33 3
1425 We're the new elevator music 2.0. 1.2727 0.04674 143 112 23 8
1426 We're increasing our lung capacity so we won't need ventilators if we test positive. 1.2727 0.04347 143 109 29 5
1427 We’re going down, like Titanic, but we’ll play your request. 1.2727 0.04347 143 113 23 7
1428 I'm not that horny! 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1429 Won't she be surprised! 1.2727 0.03992 143 106 35 2
1430 We need more treble...what's in the satchel 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1431 In retrospect, Muzak wasn't so bad." 1.2727 0.04568 143 111 25 7
1432 Six feet or we BLOW you back! 1.2727 0.04347 143 109 29 5
1433 If you want it in the key of "F", you'll have to wait for the express! 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1434 If this doesn't work for social distancing, I don't know what will. 1.2727 0.04232 143 108 31 4
1435 We've got a meeting with the top brass 1.2727 0.04674 143 112 23 8
1436 We'll be here every day this week to prevent crowds from forming in the hallways. 1.2727 0.04347 143 109 29 5
1437 We heard that the Mariachi band cancelled. 1.2727 0.04347 143 109 29 5
1438 Essential personnel only. 1.2727 0.04347 143 109 29 5
1439 You know that phrase, 'it's a long way to the top if you want to rock 'n' roll?' Well, it'll feel a lot longer in here if you hate polka." 1.2727 0.03737 143 115 23 5
1440 Back six feet or we'll toot! 1.2727 0.04880 143 114 19 10
1441 ...Tuba convention? No, that's at the Ritz...Crosstown. 1.2727 0.04458 143 110 27 6
1442 Have you seen a Drum Major around here anywhere? 1.2721 0.04269 147 112 30 5
1443 You sure you want to jam in here? 1.2695 0.04135 141 111 25 5
1444 The acoustics are even better than in the bathroom! C'mon in. 1.2695 0.04488 141 109 26 6
1445 Just because we toot for a living doesn't make it okay to do it in an elevator, Geoff. 1.2695 0.04708 141 111 22 8
1446 Just came back from a New Year’s Eve party! What did we miss? 1.2695 0.04488 141 109 26 6
1447 Sorry, little man. This elevator is reserved for the brass. 1.2695 0.04488 141 109 26 6
1448 It's illegal to have just one tuba. You could be facing tuba litigation. 1.2695 0.04599 141 110 24 7
1449 I call this little ditty, "Social Distancing". 1.2695 0.04488 141 109 26 6
1450 Actually we’re a barbershop duet with tuba costumes. 1.2695 0.04599 141 110 24 7
1451 We won low bid for live elevator music (limit: two riders, please!) 1.2695 0.04488 141 109 26 6
1452 It helps us maintain social distancing. 1.2695 0.04256 141 107 30 4
1453 This is the express elevator to the bass-ment. 1.2695 0.04708 141 111 22 8
1454 Nothing enforces social distancing quite like a sousaphone and a sousaphone player with only two lessons under his belt. 1.2695 0.04815 141 112 20 9
1455 It's our new social distancing strategy: Take two Susaphones and call us in the morning. 1.2695 0.04374 141 108 28 5
1456 Nice place to practice, but it does have its ups and downs. 1.2695 0.04488 141 109 26 6
1457 Look, if you don't appreciate live muzak, there's always the freight elevator 1.2695 0.04599 141 110 24 7
1458 Well, you can’t always get what you want. 1.2695 0.04599 141 110 24 7
1459 Our elevator pitch is low E-flat. 1.2695 0.04599 141 110 24 7
1460 Now in stereo. 1.2695 0.04599 141 110 24 7
1461 I've heard of horny, but this is ridiculous 1.2695 0.04374 141 108 28 5
1462 The sheet music called for a Doppler effect. 1.2695 0.04374 141 108 28 5
1463 Sorry, we only do rap music. 1.2695 0.04374 141 108 28 5
1464 Yes, playing the tuba has its ups and downs. 1.2695 0.04374 141 108 28 5
1465 Well, if it's just a piccolo, OK. 1.2695 0.04135 141 106 32 3
1466 George, get a load of this idiot with the messenger bag. 1.2695 0.04599 141 110 24 7
1467 We're here to play a dirge for Bonwit Teller. 1.2695 0.04374 141 108 28 5
1468 We're here to play that losing sound from "The Price is Right" any time you try to talk to that girl from 4F. 1.2695 0.04374 141 108 28 5
1469 Suddenly, Doug realized that the CDC's new recommendation promoting homemade face-masks had gone too far... 1.2695 0.04708 141 111 22 8
1470 We don't play elevator music. 1.2681 0.04308 138 105 29 4
1471 Is this G? 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1472 You can squeeze in, we're going to the roof. 1.2681 0.04183 138 108 25 5
1473 It's our own take on elevator music. 1.2681 0.04055 138 107 27 4
1474 And now your new experience in elevator music! 1.2681 0.04308 138 105 29 4
1475 How's your hearing? 1.2681 0.04546 138 107 25 6
1476 Tuba, tuba, two by two may I ride with you? 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1477 Take the next elevator for Bach 1.2681 0.04546 138 107 25 6
1478 Do you mind if we practice on the way up? 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1479 Elevator’s full. 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1480 We're full. Tuba bad! 1.2681 0.04661 138 116 12 10
1481 Going dooooown! 1.2681 0.04661 138 108 23 7
1482 Better take the next one buddy. There are 74 more of us waiting in the lobby 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1483 It's this. Or, you can buy the stairway to heaven. 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1484 There's only room if you play the piccolo. 1.2681 0.04546 138 107 25 6
1485 “We’re from Hell, just an annoying tuba-playing kind of Hell.” 1.2681 0.04661 138 108 23 7
1486 Is this lingerie? 1.2681 0.04546 138 107 25 6
1487 Come on. We'll play 'Dueling Tubas' for you on the way down. 1.2681 0.04183 138 104 31 3
1488 It's a new spin on elevator music 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1489 Happy Birthday to you. Happy birthday to... 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1490 Fully appreciated but at some point they'll probably just go with a ding to announce each floor. 1.2681 0.03922 138 104 32 2
1491 We don't know how to play - it's just for social distancing. 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1492 We're six beats apart 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1493 We are taking the elevator music to a new level. 1.2681 0.04308 138 105 29 4
1494 I guess they changed the elevator music. 1.2681 0.04055 138 103 33 2
1495 No one appreciates good elevator music these days. 1.2681 0.04661 138 108 23 7
1496 I don't think that's what the boss meant when he said the company's hit a low note. 1.2681 0.04546 138 107 25 6
1497 Good way to enforce the 6 foot limit! 1.2681 0.04308 138 105 29 4
1498 Come in. It gives transcendental acoustic! 1.2681 0.04661 138 108 23 7
1499 While most people stream music, podcasts, videos and games... Elevator music stages a daring, dramatic comeback! 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1500 We've decided to show COVID-19 who's boss._ 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1501 Excuse me Sir, do you know which floor is hosting the Tuba convention? 1.2681 0.04055 138 106 29 3
1502 Sorry. Heavy metal only. 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1503 The *ding* broke. Until the work crew fixes it, we'll be playing for all the door openings. 1.2681 0.04429 138 106 27 5
1504 Wait a minute or two. There should be enough room with the piccolos. 1.2681 0.04546 138 107 25 6
1505 Did you happen to see 76 Trombone players? 1.2681 0.04546 138 107 25 6
1506 What floor’s the parade on? 1.2681 0.04055 138 103 33 2
1507 The acoustics are uplifting. 1.2681 0.04661 138 108 23 7
1508 It’s totally tubular, man.” 1.2681 0.04546 138 107 25 6
1509 We turned too soon. 1.2671 0.04042 146 110 33 3
1510 Pardon us. Just trying to nail down our elevator pitch. 1.2662 0.04281 139 106 29 4
1511 We've had some ups and downs this year. 1.2662 0.04632 139 111 20 8
1512 Is this considered aerosol-generating? 1.2662 0.04401 139 107 27 5
1513 Well,it would've been unlikely a couple months ago,but now,even a slow tuba duet can be seen as a lively high spot in your day. 1.2662 0.04401 139 107 27 5
1514 Just another day at the office. Today we are working on a new form of elevator music. 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1515 Is this A-flat? 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1516 It helps with the social distancing thing 1.2647 0.04205 136 108 24 4
1517 OMG! They take elevator music very seriously. 1.2647 0.04074 136 102 32 2
1518 Sorry the quarantine only allows two tubas in the elevator, you’ll have to wait for the next one 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1519 Bell’s broken 1.2647 0.04810 136 108 20 8
1520 It looks really bad. Why would you even come to work without your instrument? 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1521 Getting down. 1.2647 0.04810 136 108 20 8
1522 The management doesn't allow bagpipes. 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1523 Well, Yes. They're supposed to be tubas, or Sousaphones. But the artist didn't really know how to draw one. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1524 Are you going to B Flat? 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1525 Welcome to Macy's. You're our lucky third customer. Enjoy the Sousa. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1526 We're in social distancing enforcement 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1527 No, we can't share the elevator. 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1528 It might seem unusual, but he's my understudy. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1529 Come in, Sousa wrote some wonderful elevator music. 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1530 We're trying to hit a low note. 1.2647 0.04074 136 102 32 2
1531 Did you see last weeks three submissions for the caption contest? Weren't they the lousiest ones you've ever seen. 1.2647 0.04810 136 108 20 8
1532 Let's practice social distancing: you shouldn't hear us. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1533 You the one with the bad lease? 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1534 Come on in! But be careful when we swing round and march to the back. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1535 I thought it was the ideal way to practice social distancing, until I found Bertram had the same idea. 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1536 Could you press the button again please ? We’re trying to tune with the ding. 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1537 You wouldn't happen to be a conductor, would you? 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1538 Sure it is social distancing gear. Nobody will want to be near us if we sneeze while playing. 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1539 come on in and make a request- we are the Muzak 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1540 Seems to be an echo in here. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1541 You bet your brass we can make room! 1.2647 0.04810 136 108 20 8
1542 Next stop Ground Floor! We’ll play you out. 1.2647 0.04074 136 102 32 2
1543 Two horny players going down... 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1544 Sir, would you happen to know if the ventilator design hackathon is on this floor? 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1545 Can you sing? 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1546 Because they seem to encourage social distancing. 1.2647 0.04205 136 103 30 3
1547 Yeah, the elevator music is live now. The cellos are in the next car if you prefer ... 1.2647 0.04205 136 103 30 3
1548 Sixth floor...Tuba, Sousa, Lollapalooza 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1549 Its elevator music in general you're opposed to ? 1.2647 0.04205 136 103 30 3
1550 Ooo you’re just in time to hear the Theme from Love Story! 1.2647 0.04205 136 103 30 3
1551 Horizontal Sousaphones for social distancing. 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1552 Do you know Fugue in G Minor by Bach? 1.2647 0.04074 136 106 26 4
1553 Here’s a little something by the band Chicago. 1.2647 0.04074 136 102 32 2
1554 Our low key quarantine does have its ups and downs. 1.2647 0.04205 136 103 30 3
1555 Are you Professor Harold Hill? 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1556 The strings are in the next elevator. We are self isolating by section. 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1557 Going down or berserk. 1.2647 0.04577 136 108 21 7
1558 Come on in dude--and get your freak on! 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1559 Hi, we're the two tubas going to two. 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1560 Hop in! We're just trying to see how low we can go. 1.2647 0.04205 136 103 30 3
1561 What do you mean "what was that?" That was the tuba duet version of Love in An Elevator! Duh! 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1562 Where is your tuba? 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1563 We got stuck somewhere between here and fourth floor. Please don't tell me the Titanic left without us. 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1564 The piccolos are rehearsing in the next elevator. 1.2647 0.04205 136 103 30 3
1565 They're getting serious about social distancing upstairs. 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1566 Do you mind if we practice while you ride? 1.2647 0.04333 136 106 25 5
1567 It's legal, we're in the Brass family. 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1568 We have room for a piccolo. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1569 You say tuba,I say sousaphone. We could call the whole thing off! 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1570 I see you forgot your Tuba. 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1571 No one expects it, but we're a marching band too. 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1572 Who would have expected two tubas?? 1.2647 0.04205 136 103 30 3
1573 OMG, NOAH’S ELEVATOR! 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1574 We used to be called social outcasts 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1575 Guess you didn’t see the latest advice from the CDC. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1576 Yes, one of them is named Tubby. How did you know? 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1577 DING! 1.2647 0.04333 136 107 25 4
1578 Before you say anything, have you tried drawing a tuba from memory? 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1579 Just room for a piccolo. 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1580 I’m not joking, tubas are buy one get one free on the 3rd floor! 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1581 Six feet, or you lose your eardrums! 1.2647 0.03498 136 110 22 4
1582 Yes, we're going down! 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1583 Sorry, we only have room for a drummer. 1.2647 0.04810 136 108 20 8
1584 The elevator music recording studio's closed; we're working from home. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1585 We’re Muzak with some oompah! 1.2647 0.04695 136 107 22 7
1586 Social distancing. We couldn't find bagpipes. 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1587 Six Feet! Six Feet! 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1588 Is this where we pitch swimming pool inflatables? 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1589 We're going swimming. Wanna come with? 1.2647 0.04205 136 110 20 6
1590 It’s cool, we play ska! 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1591 There's Trouble in Co-op City. 1.2647 0.04333 136 109 21 6
1592 It’s not ideal, but this was the closest thing we could find to n95 masks. 1.2647 0.04457 136 107 23 6
1593 Come on in! We've got room for one flute or two piccolos. 1.2647 0.04333 136 104 28 4
1594 I'm sorry. We only play elevator music. 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1595 Here for the buy one get one sale? 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1596 Don’t worry, we’ve been coughing into the tubas. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1597 They wanted elevator music that also encouraged social distancing. 1.2647 0.04205 136 103 30 3
1598 For social distancing, I think that we've proved that two is better than one. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1599 Have you seen the baton twirler? 1.2647 0.04577 136 106 24 6
1600 Sorry, we’re practicing social distancing. 1.2647 0.04457 136 105 26 5
1601 Lower Level? 1.2612 0.04228 134 102 29 3
1602 This is a five star hotel. We don't just pipe in prerecorded elevator music. 1.2612 0.04228 134 102 29 3
1603 You'll take the next one. 1.2612 0.04359 134 103 27 4
1604 You guys hiring? 1.2612 0.04093 134 101 31 2
1605 We're looking for our entrance. 1.2612 0.04359 134 103 27 4
1606 I’m sorry, only two people at a time are allowed on. 1.2612 0.04359 134 103 27 4
1607 It's very effective. 1.2612 0.04228 134 102 29 3
1608 Two ba' or not Two ba', that is the question! 1.2612 0.04486 134 104 25 5
1609 Hey, quarantine is quarantine. 1.2612 0.04228 134 102 29 3
1610 Three is a crowd. 1.2612 0.04486 134 104 25 5
1611 Come on in. I'm Jim. Behind me is Bill...he's a brass-hole. 1.2612 0.03954 134 106 24 4
1612 Hey buddy, I got a wedgie I can't reach, help me out. 1.2612 0.04609 134 105 23 6
1613 We can't fit another brass but we could maybe squeeze in a woodwind. 1.2612 0.04609 134 105 23 6
1614 We’re needing to leave. We couldn’t get by the metal detector. 1.2612 0.04228 134 102 29 3
1615 You don’t really care for music, do you? 1.2612 0.04609 134 107 20 7
1616 Da Saints. We're Marchin In 1.2612 0.04729 134 106 21 7
1617 You got masks for those things? 1.2612 0.04609 134 105 23 6
1618 That's right, we're the top brass. 1.2612 0.04486 134 104 25 5
1619 Yes, I did toot in the elevator. 1.2612 0.04359 134 103 27 4
1620 Our spit valve etiquette is at an all time high. 1.2612 0.04093 134 101 31 2
1621 Step in. We're spreading the coronavirus in a big way. 1.2612 0.04359 134 106 23 5
1622 Come on in, there's plenty of room 1.2612 0.03338 134 106 26 2
1623 Blowing up or down? 1.2612 0.04359 134 103 27 4
1624 I'll just take the stairs. 1.2612 0.04609 134 105 23 6
1625 S'matta'? Never heard of elevator music? 1.2612 0.04228 134 102 29 3
1626 Mr Spielberg ? We’ve had a great idea for a film. 1.2612 0.04486 134 104 25 5
1627 I'm sorry, it's 2 horny in there for me to come inside." "Are you sure Jerry? there's some space in the back." "But you guys got your hands on your instruments in a public space." "We just toot and blow...just plug your nose and face the door." 1.2612 0.03502 134 115 13 6
1628 I will need something stronger than the n95 facemask to avoid these droplets. 1.2612 0.04486 134 104 25 5
1629 It's the new condo rule to enforce social distancing in the elevator. 1.2612 0.04609 134 105 23 6
1630 Welcome to the 18th. floor Elevator Concert. We're here for two weeks. 1.2612 0.04486 134 104 25 5
1631 If I play a B-flat, you will be... well, you know 1.2612 0.04093 134 101 31 2
1632 You don't need an instrument for the party on 31. 1.2612 0.04609 134 105 23 6
1633 Grandpa was in the orchestra on the Titanic. Grandma insists we wear these. 1.2612 0.04609 134 105 23 6
1634 We're going 'um-pah' 1.2612 0.04486 134 104 25 5
1635 Come in if you have a shoehorn. 1.2612 0.04486 134 104 25 5
1636 Practicing in here has really brought our sound to another level. 1.2612 0.04486 134 104 25 5
1637 ''Which way to the pool ?" 1.2612 0.03809 134 112 17 5
1638 But David, the email said we’re meeting with the big brass 1.2576 0.04385 132 102 26 4
1639 Elevator's full. Too-baaaad. 1.2576 0.04251 132 103 25 4
1640 You'll be floored by this next number. 1.2576 0.04515 132 103 24 5
1641 I'll take the next movement 1.2576 0.04251 132 101 28 3
1642 Would you like The Final Countdown or Livin’ on a Prayer? 1.2576 0.04884 132 106 18 8
1643 If you thought singing in the shower was good... 1.2576 0.04641 132 104 22 6
1644 Ooh, look at this cool guy, messenger bag, untucked shirt. Ooh, real tough. Either take a drink, motherfucker, or get off my stage 1.2576 0.04884 132 106 18 8
1645 No, those are smaller. This is the Sousaphone car. 1.2576 0.04515 132 103 24 5
1646 Hey, Gen Z‘er, move! The droplets from these babies fly 60 feet, further with a low F. 1.2576 0.04515 132 103 24 5
1647 We were told to come in on four. 1.2576 0.04515 132 103 24 5
1648 Don't worry, there are seventy-six trombones right behind. 1.2576 0.04385 132 106 20 6
1649 I'll just wait for the next one 1.2576 0.04641 132 104 22 6
1650 We've been a duo, ever since we had our tubas tied " Submitted by Catherine Sauve Ottawa, Ontario, Canad 1.2576 0.04884 132 106 18 8
1651 We walk into a bar... 1.2576 0.04764 132 105 20 7
1652 Thanks! When the door closes, just leave the pizza and walk away . 1.2576 0.04385 132 102 26 4
1653 We have our marching orders. What's your excuse? 1.2576 0.03969 132 99 32 1
1654 Best way to carry a tune. 1.2576 0.04251 132 101 28 3
1655 Phil? 1.2558 0.04302 129 99 27 3
1656 Going down? 1.2558 0.04705 129 102 21 6
1657 Just when I thought things couldn't get any lower, we reached the bass-ment. 1.2558 0.04302 129 101 24 4
1658 From the top! 1.2558 0.04705 129 102 21 6
1659 Can you hum the first few bars...? 1.2558 0.04302 129 102 23 4
1660 Yeah yeah. Like we’ve never heard that one before. 1.2558 0.04302 129 99 27 3
1661 We suggest the stairs; your ears' health hinge on our benevolence in here. 1.2558 0.04302 129 99 27 3
1662 Is this the floor of the Jones' funeral? 1.2558 0.04705 129 102 21 6
1663 Is this the floor for lingerie? 1.2558 0.04302 129 99 27 3
1664 The next car is for man bags. 1.2558 0.04832 129 103 19 7
1665 Your choice -- take the next one or have the sousaphone experience of a lifetime. 1.2558 0.04575 129 101 23 5
1666 Yes, we've grown tubescent, but we can make room for you, too. 1.2558 0.04832 129 103 19 7
1667 I'd take the next one if I were you. This one's gonna blow. 1.2558 0.04440 129 100 25 4
1668 They seemed upbeat enough, but I’ll wait for the euphoniums. 1.2558 0.04705 129 102 21 6
1669 They say it kills the virus. 1.2558 0.04440 129 100 25 4
1670 Wait til you see the 76 trombones! 1.2558 0.04575 129 103 20 6
1671 Is this the Berman Bar Mitzvah ? 1.2558 0.04159 129 98 29 2
1672 Sorry, this is the sousaphone elevator. The tuba elevator is to your right. 1.2558 0.04302 129 99 27 3
1673 We're just filling in while they're fixing the Muzak 1.2558 0.04440 129 100 25 4
1674 No, wise guy, this is NOT the intubation ward. 1.2558 0.04440 129 100 25 4
1675 Don't worry, we studied harmony and counterpoint at Julliard." 1.2558 0.04440 129 100 25 4
1676 A job is a job, ok? 1.2558 0.04159 129 98 29 2
1677 Are you interested in participating in Phase 1 of the antibody delivery program? 1.2558 0.04832 129 103 19 7
1678 I was like you once, carefree and happy, then she said "put this on and I'll be your friend", but I don't believe her. 1.2558 0.04575 129 101 23 5
1679 Take the stairs up, the trombones and trumpets are next. 1.2558 0.04832 129 103 19 7
1680 I'm telling ya, they won't even need a caption for this one. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1681 No, these are sousaphones. Tubas are in the other elevator. 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1682 I recommend taking the stairs, the Boston Pops is performing at the rooftop bar in an hour. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1683 We're the first-responder team from the Ghostbusters. 1.2520 0.04325 127 98 26 3
1684 Because Muzak is for sissies. 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1685 What do you think we're doing. We're going up! 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1686 You'll have to find another arrangement. 1.2520 0.03868 127 102 22 3
1687 Our socially distancing ensemble is suddenly catching on 1.2520 0.04026 127 96 30 1
1688 Do you play the piccolo? 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1689 This is the only place that the neighbors will allow us to rehearse. 1.2520 0.04178 127 97 28 2
1690 We get off at 49, OK 1.2520 0.04325 127 98 26 3
1691 Seen a triangle, short, annoying? If you do, tell him Bob and Al are looking for him. 1.2520 0.04605 127 104 16 7
1692 We got the last two Lysol dispensers. 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1693 We may not look like essential workers, but we play a mean duet. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1694 Come on in - you're just in time for the finale. 1.2520 0.04178 127 97 28 2
1695 An octave higher or an octave lower? 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1696 Headed to the Bass-ment 1.2520 0.04325 127 102 20 5
1697 I picked a good day to have a burrito for lunch. 1.2520 0.04869 127 102 18 7
1698 Social distancing devices, yes sir. 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1699 Sorry! You came in behind the beat. 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1700 You may want to wait for the next car. It has the piccolo player. 1.2520 0.04869 127 102 18 7
1701 The people in the penthouse think low frequencies kill the Covid19 virus. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1702 We didn't have a choice. The other elevator is Baroque. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1703 We will be picking up another tuba on the next floor. 1.2520 0.03868 127 105 18 4
1704 Sorry to blow you off, but we’re full. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1705 It's a great way to keep our Social distancing. 1.2520 0.04325 127 98 26 3
1706 Hope you’re the piccolo player 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1707 So, is the all you can eat dinner menu as good as they say ? 1.2520 0.04325 127 98 26 3
1708 Hold the Covid-19 jokes. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1709 No, actually, they're sousaphones. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1710 Going up while tuning up. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1711 Who ordered Hooters? 1.2520 0.04996 127 103 16 8
1712 We find it's very effective for social distancing. 1.2520 0.04178 127 97 28 2
1713 What happened to elevator senior hour? 1.2520 0.04325 127 98 26 3
1714 This elevator is for the top brass. 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1715 The hotel didn't pay their Muzak licensing bill. 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1716 We are the elevator music. Still working out the logistics! 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1717 It's the only way we ever get to play higher notes. 1.2520 0.04325 127 98 26 3
1718 Is this the lobby? 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1719 Well, we can’t play the trains these days. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1720 That's one way to keep people six feet away from you, Bob 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1721 Wanna hear our Covid fight song?! 1.2520 0.04996 127 103 16 8
1722 The chime's broken again. 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1723 Don't worry--you'll be able to hear us from twenty-seven feet away. 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1724 I know we're not allowed up here but please tell us: what happened to the good boy after he got his well-deserved fudge? 1.2520 0.03868 127 99 26 2
1725 'Where's the Colo-rectal Surgeons meeting room? 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1726 And the band played on. 1.2520 0.04325 127 98 26 3
1727 Where's the Exec Suite for the big brass? 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1728 New social distancing measures. 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1729 Brass section only, sir. 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1730 Hey, you wanna take a ride with the top brass? 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1731 Not THAT kind of horny! 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1732 We accept tips not to play. 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1733 It's to boost morale. 1.2520 0.04869 127 102 18 7
1734 Please come in, we've replaced the elevator music with a sousaphone duet and would appreciate your opinion. 1.2520 0.04178 127 103 19 5
1735 We had to play somewhere. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1736 Womp, wooooomp 1.2520 0.04869 127 102 18 7
1737 YOU MAY WANT TO WEAR EARPLUGS. 1.2520 0.04178 127 97 28 2
1738 Did you order the escort? 1.2520 0.04325 127 98 26 3
1739 This elevator really blows. 1.2520 0.04467 127 101 21 5
1740 Hey it beats busking on the L train 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1741 C'mon in - you'll help deaden the sound. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1742 No masks available so we figured this would keep people away 1.2520 0.04178 127 97 28 2
1743 The Philharmonic is in social isolation 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1744 For a C-note we won’t play a single note 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1745 Where the hell is your tuba? 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1746 We got tired of marching up the stairs. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1747 If you think this is crowded, wait till the percussion section 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1748 Have the other 74 already arrived ? 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1749 Yeah, I know, but apparently we’re f***ing essential 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1750 These are our home made respirators 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1751 The acoustics in here are up and down. 1.2520 0.04869 127 102 18 7
1752 Did you order the tubagram? 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1753 Was that you? 1.2520 0.04869 127 102 18 7
1754 What were you expecting, muzak 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1755 Why don't I just work from home like everybody else? 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1756 We’ve been replaced by a phone app. 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1757 Please don't sneeze 1.2520 0.04178 127 97 28 2
1758 Our seventy six trombones exceeded capacity. 1.2520 0.04996 127 103 16 8
1759 The speakers are down. We're the new elevator music. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1760 It's OK. From the mouthpiece to the bell is three feet. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1761 It's our way of practicing social distancing. 1.2520 0.04605 127 100 22 5
1762 One minute the 76 trombones were in front of us, ... 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1763 Which way are Tuba Aerobics? 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1764 I'm getting out of this lease one way or another. 1.2520 0.04996 127 103 16 8
1765 The big boss just gave us our marching orders. 1.2520 0.04325 127 98 26 3
1766 This is as low as we can go. 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1767 It's uplifting music. 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1768 We don’t play, but it’s great for social distancing 1.2520 0.04178 127 97 28 2
1769 We were getting complaints about the muzak. 1.2520 0.04325 127 98 26 3
1770 Going Oooomp? 1.2520 0.04739 127 101 20 6
1771 We heard they were making a comeback. 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1772 You were expecting maybe the New York Philharmonic? 1.2520 0.04178 127 97 28 2
1773 The ship went down. 1.2520 0.04467 127 99 24 4
1774 Join us! We’re headed to a gigantic desk concert. 1.2500 0.04227 124 95 27 2
1775 Some guy in the penthouse has hired us as his 'Distancing Crew.' 1.2500 0.04296 128 99 26 3
1776 Don't worry. I'll just wait for the next one. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1777 It's to encourage social distancing. 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1778 Typical elevator Germans. I'll take the next one. 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1779 Do you know what floor has the horn section? 1.2500 0.04227 124 95 27 2
1780 Most requested? Kenny G, of course. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1781 The elevator chime just wasn't doing it for us 1.2500 0.04573 128 101 22 5
1782 Noah is loading up again, and asked for two of everything, including tubas. 1.2500 0.04942 124 100 17 7
1783 It’s the newest guideline for practicing social distancing. 1.2500 0.05201 124 102 13 9
1784 We're replacing the Muzak. 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1785 It’s how we are enforcing social distancing. 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1786 Is this the Bass ment? 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1787 Sorry, this one is for the top brass. 1.2500 0.04669 124 103 14 7
1788 Are the Muzak auditions on this floor? 1.2500 0.05073 124 101 15 8
1789 Going down. Three octaves. 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1790 We’ve replaced the Muzak. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1791 We find they really, really promote social distancing. 1.2500 0.04227 124 95 27 2
1792 Going downbeat. 1.2500 0.04227 124 95 27 2
1793 The whole brass section is quarantined and hungry, so order us takeout or we'll blow some seriously large droplets! 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1794 Come on guys. Read the room. It's not a time for tubas. 1.2500 0.04227 124 100 20 4
1795 Step aboard and join us in redefining the concept of "elevator music." 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1796 What are you staring at? 14 days in lockdown and we’re gonna get a little tubby! 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1797 If you don't like elevator music, take the stairs. 1.2500 0.04942 124 100 17 7
1798 Muzak is out again. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1799 They help keep us two meters apart. 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1800 Be sure to avoid floor six, it has some nasty violinists 1.2500 0.04227 124 95 27 2
1801 ---and you thought you would have a quiet ride up ``` 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1802 No! These are not tubas, they are sousaphones! Geez! 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1803 Next level brass. 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1804 It's 6:55pm! 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1805 There are fifteen clowns in the next one over . But then again, they have flutes. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1806 We're not social distancing, but this is where we shelter in place. 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1807 This is how we strike the high notes. 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1808 Nope. Not without a tuba. 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1809 Harumph! 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1810 Hope you like elevator music. 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1811 Sorry, we are going to the bass-ment. 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1812 We're 180 pounds to weight capacity so be honest. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1813 Sorry, can't let you in...we're with the social-distancing band. 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1814 Achieves social distancing every time. 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1815 We're late for the fourth movement of Symphonie Fantastique. 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1816 Just practicing until we get to Carnegie Hall. 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1817 So this is where they record elevator music! 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1818 Sorry... but the acoustics are better when the door is closed. 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1819 The acoustics are sublime... 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1820 we specialize in elevator music 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1821 Originally called, wired radio, muzak was designed to have a calming effect... 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1822 Excuse me, Sir, do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior John Philip Sousa? 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1823 Just be glad you're not going to the penthouse with the piccolos. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1824 John, I think the audience of the third floor was more engaged. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1825 We don't play, but the tubas keep us at least three feet apart. 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1826 I hope you like music! 1.2500 0.04942 124 100 17 7
1827 I've got more if you really want to keep people six feet away 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1828 We make social distancing easy. 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1829 The Muzak system is down. We'll be your elevator entertainment for today! 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1830 This elevator goes to eleven! 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1831 Yes. Organic elevator music. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1832 We can't get any farther apart. We certainly don't have room for you. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1833 Two tubas is six feet. You can pick one up in the lobby. 1.2500 0.04227 124 95 27 2
1834 New employee perk: live elevator music 1.2500 0.04227 124 95 27 2
1835 Where is the practice for the President’s Easter Parade ? 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1836 The elevator with the drums is way worse. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1837 People complained about the old elevator music. 1.2500 0.04807 124 99 19 6
1838 We vowed to march through many ups and downs. 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1839 We're going down. For the trumpets you have to go up. 1.2500 0.04526 124 97 23 4
1840 Live elevator music for your enjoyment, sir. 1.2500 0.04227 124 100 20 4
1841 Everyone else in the orchestra seems to prefer social distancing 1.2500 0.04379 124 96 25 3
1842 We are installing new elevator music. 1.2500 0.04069 124 94 29 1
1843 Don’t go up to four. They’re giving out marching papers. 1.2500 0.04669 124 98 21 5
1844 And now, it's the Love Theme from 'Dressed to Kill.' 1.2459 0.04247 122 97 22 3
1845 We sound best at a distance of 6ft or more. 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1846 Please show us to the Lopez Quinceanera. 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1847 What? No tuba? Get a life, Bro 1.2459 0.04981 122 99 16 7
1848 We had a request for live elevator music 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1849 We're here to play "This Too Shall Pass" 1.2459 0.04247 122 96 23 3
1850 No, we're going way down. 1.2459 0.04247 122 97 22 3
1851 Sorry, the Muzak is down. 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1852 Wait what? You say you ordered curbside pick up? We were told you asked for delivery. 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1853 We're the 2 Ba's. 1.2459 0.04843 122 98 18 6
1854 Welcome to the polka car! 1.2459 0.04843 122 98 18 6
1855 You have kissable lips! 1.2459 0.04843 122 98 18 6
1856 Welcome to our upgraded elevator music program. 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1857 Is it the BASSment? 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1858 You could use something to lift you up today 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1859 Tusk! 1.2459 0.05115 122 100 14 8
1860 Come on! We’re here to make your elevator ride enjoyable 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1861 YouTuba? 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1862 Sousaphones promote social distancing." 1.2459 0.03915 122 92 30 0
1863 Who puts buttons on the side of an elevator? 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1864 Wait for the next car. It’s the piccolo. 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1865 ah damn! these aren’t the strippers I ordered! 1.2459 0.04981 122 99 16 7
1866 Diminuendo...? 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1867 We’re the new big thing in elevator music! 1.2459 0.04247 122 96 23 3
1868 Your 'murse' makes you look like a doofus, you know. 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1869 Sorry to take up so much room, but we've got our marching orders. 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1870 You’re wife sent us. You’re late to the orchestra. 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1871 The acoustics are fantastic in here. 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1872 Sorry, we're at maximum volume 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1873 Boy, that meeting sure ended on a low note. 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1874 We've been sheltered in place and just got called up by the top brass. 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1875 You should be happy the percussion section got off on 5. 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1876 Going all the way up? Wait for the piccolo. 1.2459 0.04555 122 98 19 5
1877 Better wait for the next one buddy, this one’s all about that bass. 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1878 To be tubas or not tubas, that is the question. 1.2459 0.05115 122 100 14 8
1879 Going oompapa oompapa? 1.2459 0.04981 122 99 16 7
1880 Are you still sure you don't want to take the stairs? 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1881 Can you pronounce “Grolsch”? 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1882 These team-building activities are really starting to go over the top. 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1883 Management takes elevator music seriously sir. 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1884 We play the twoba 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1885 We were hired by a hearing aid specialist on the top floor. 1.2459 0.03915 122 98 21 3
1886 Where's your piccolo? 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1887 We still have room for a piccolo" 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1888 Going down....to a low b flat. 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1889 Oh, you ordered a tuna sandwich? 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1890 Can you catch the next one? We are trying to adjust for the acoustics. 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1891 Keep those requests coming 1.2459 0.04843 122 98 18 6
1892 Sorry, we're still going lower. 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1893 Our playing helps maintain social distancing. 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1894 The speakers broke so the building called the elevator music corporation and they brought in us. Don’t ask, just go with it. 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1895 Is this a sign that I should start taking the stairs? 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1896 Rest assured, you won't have to hear the elevator music. 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1897 Hmm... I think I forgot my keys. 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1898 This is the Flashmob elevator. Are you the conductor? 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1899 The Muzak Brothers' first beta-test. 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1900 Sorry, you'll have to catch the next one. We're joining 76 trombones in the lounge. 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1901 Do you play the accordion? 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1902 In case we get COVID-19, they won't have to intubate us. 1.2459 0.04843 122 98 18 6
1903 It works for us!!!! No-one else fits!!!! 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1904 Two's a crowd, three's a fire hazard. 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1905 You have to get up pretty..early..in..the..morning to hang with the Heinz brothers. 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1906 Can we serenade you on the way down? 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1907 We're taking requests today! 1.2459 0.04843 122 98 18 6
1908 The acoustics are just awesome. 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1909 We're here to see your top brass? 1.2459 0.04843 122 98 18 6
1910 You might want to hop on before the 76 trombonists show up. 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1911 Say, is the oom-pah room on this floor? 1.2459 0.04403 122 95 24 3
1912 I've had enough of the tiny clubs Roger, we're going straight to the top. 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1913 Would you like some elevator music while going up? 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1914 hoping to delve down into the depths of those lower notes? 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1915 Epstein didn't kill himself. 1.2459 0.04843 122 98 18 6
1916 We entertain, inspire, and contribute to social distancing. 1.2459 0.04247 122 94 26 2
1917 Clogged toilet in 419 1.2459 0.04981 122 99 16 7
1918 I never knew how good the acoustics were in here! 1.2459 0.04555 122 96 22 4
1919 We sound best at about the 9th floor. 1.2459 0.04701 122 97 20 5
1920 We are just trying to ensure social distancing. 1.2439 0.04667 123 98 20 5
1921 Much like scorpions, Sousaphones travel in pairs. 1.2439 0.04372 123 96 24 3
1922 Somebody vandalized the elevator audio- - We are your live Muzak 1.2439 0.04808 123 99 18 6
1923 You can horn in. 1.2439 0.04217 123 95 26 2
1924 Our pitch to provide live elevator music fell flat. 1.2439 0.04217 123 95 26 2
1925 I'm saying it right now - it wasn't us. 1.2439 0.04217 123 95 26 2
1926 Granted, it's not the best arrangement. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1927 We tried kazoos, then vuvuzelas, but we didn't get a single laugh. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1928 Get on now. There won't be any room when the string section comes up. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1929 Come on in we are going to play NAME THAT TUNE. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1930 Do you know which floor the rehearsal is on? 1.2417 0.04427 120 94 23 3
1931 No time to explain, we’re from 2025 - just get in. 1.2417 0.04879 120 97 17 6
1932 Hi! We're The Two Tubby Tubas and we're stopping on each floor to cheer y'all up. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1933 Are you doing this for all Covid-19 survivors? 1.2417 0.04879 120 97 17 6
1934 The blast from these babies will keep people 6ft.away 1.2417 0.04266 120 93 25 2
1935 Looks like doors are finally opening for us. 1.2417 0.04879 120 97 17 6
1936 I’m sure I don’t know what two tubas might be doing in your elevator but these two sousaphones are going down. 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1937 Things do tend to get a little wild on John Philip Sousa Appreciation Day. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1938 Chamber music 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1939 What? They said elevator music was in style! 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1940 Let me just warn you pal, this elevator ride blows. 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1941 Three's a crowd, buddy. 1.2417 0.04266 120 93 25 2
1942 The airline lost our cases. Good thing we always carry these with us, or we would be out of a gig tonight! 1.2417 0.04427 120 96 20 4
1943 Sorry, only have room for a piccolo or possibly a flute. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1944 Courtesy of the landlord, after tenants complained about the Muzak. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1945 Care to hear a John Philip Sousa tune in stereo? 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1946 We’re tired of Muzak, that’s all! 1.2417 0.03924 120 91 29 0
1947 Sorry, the A Train is no longer running. 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1948 On Tuesdays this is our practice space but you're welcome to join us for a few floors. 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1949 You're late,again. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1950 No worries. Our tubas are equipped with filters that protect against airborne viruses. 1.2417 0.03924 120 99 18 3
1951 Sousaphone, actually. We get that a lot. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1952 Unfortunately, we both had the same plan to keep people six feet away. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1953 Before you get on, I should warn you, we’ll be rehearsing all the way up 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1954 Going down? Of course - we never go very high. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1955 The piccolos took the stairs. 1.2417 0.04266 120 93 25 2
1956 Don't bother with the stairs. 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1957 Sorry, no room for social distancing. 1.2417 0.04099 120 92 27 1
1958 The Muzak system is down. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1959 This one is full, but the next one has the flutes. 1.2417 0.04427 120 94 23 3
1960 Sorry, we've got to keep some social distance. Rehearsal just ended and we're heading down from the roof. 1.2417 0.04427 120 94 23 3
1961 We’ve found the perfect way to maintain social distance! 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1962 Come in, there's plenty of vroom. 1.2417 0.04879 120 97 17 6
1963 For a moment, Neil thought he was dreaming: finally an elevator ride free from the constant terror of severe IBS. 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1964 You must have missed the last virtual meeting—new department rule—we have to stand at least one sousaphone apart in elevators. 1.2417 0.04266 120 93 25 2
1965 Hold that note, I'm going up! 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1966 Is there room for an harmonica player 1.2417 0.04266 120 93 25 2
1967 Don't think of them as tubas but as "social distancing" aids. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1968 We’re better than muzak 1.2417 0.04099 120 92 27 1
1969 That was the sousaphone you heard. 1.2417 0.04266 120 93 25 2
1970 So, where's your tuba, Bob? 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1971 Sorry, but we’re going to the bass-ment. 1.2417 0.04266 120 93 25 2
1972 I'll take the next one. It's not you, it's social distancing... 1.2417 0.04427 120 94 23 3
1973 Sorry! The masks were all sold out 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1974 Didn't get the memo? You were supposed to bring the accordion. 1.2417 0.04266 120 93 25 2
1975 Were you expecting piccolos? 1.2417 0.04427 120 94 23 3
1976 The tubas help us maintain a social distance. 1.2417 0.04427 120 94 23 3
1977 I use the tuba to keep people 6 feet away, but it doesn't work against other tuba enthusiasts. Anyway, take the stairs, it's healthier. 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1978 We've been hired to play "Happy Birthday" by the Men's Room sinks. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1979 Thankyou, I'll take the next one. 1.2417 0.04427 120 94 23 3
1980 Can you go, “Oom”? 1.2417 0.04266 120 93 25 2
1981 Get on. We're about to play Blow The Man Down! 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1982 Sorry, this one is brass only. 1.2417 0.04266 120 93 25 2
1983 It's like tubas were invented for social distancing. 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1984 The Muzak player is getting fixed. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1985 This is just a rehearsal. 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1986 We are management's response to ingrate tenants' complaints about the elevator music. 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1987 It discourages social interaction. 1.2417 0.04099 120 92 27 1
1988 This one came with lousy elevator music 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1989 Get in! We’re blowing the lid off this joint! 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1990 We don’t know “You’ve Got to Be Kidding.” Any other requests before we go? 1.2417 0.04879 120 97 17 6
1991 Hey man, you hiring by any chance? 1.2417 0.04733 120 96 19 5
1992 Out of the way! We've had our tubas tied! 1.2417 0.03550 120 100 18 2
1993 It’s not a competition, but I’m winning.” 1.2417 0.04583 120 95 21 4
1994 Which floor is Alexa on? 1.2417 0.04879 120 97 17 6
1995 Wait! Don't come into the elevator! Some wacko keeps trapping people in tubas! 1.2397 0.04698 121 97 19 5
1996 I’ll take the next one, I’d rather not listen to elevator music 1.2397 0.04843 121 98 17 6
1997 Looks like there will be more elevator music than usual 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
1998 No, it's a sousaphone. 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
1999 There's room in here if you play the flute." Michael Rogness, St. Paul, Minnesot 1.2393 0.04485 117 92 22 3
2000 Did you hear the one about the two boomers in an elevator? 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2001 This elevator blows. 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2002 Well blow me down... 1.2393 0.04317 117 91 24 2
2003 This is how we practice our high and low notes. 1.2393 0.04485 117 92 22 3
2004 You may want to wait for the next lift, we are about to play duet.. 1.2393 0.04143 117 90 26 1
2005 'Tuba'd. Take the next one." "Ugh, you guys blow. 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2006 If you can figure out how to better keep people away, I'd like to know. 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2007 We oordinarily do stand six feet apart, so people can get us in stereo. 1.2393 0.04485 117 92 22 3
2008 If you don't mind waiting for the next, there will be more room with the flutists. 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2009 We hate elevator music. 1.2393 0.04953 117 95 16 6
2010 Come on in and listen to us practice some favorite Sousa marches. 1.2393 0.04802 117 96 15 6
2011 It's a social distancing device and an in-joke about improved design for Sousaphones which we won't explain to you. 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2012 The muzak's not working 1.2393 0.04317 117 94 20 3
2013 We could use a third. You play piccolo? 1.2393 0.04485 117 92 22 3
2014 Is that a piccolo in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2015 Social distancing is instrumental. 1.2393 0.04317 117 91 24 2
2016 Wrong floor! Oh, these damned reunions aren't as much fun as they used to be. 1.2393 0.04317 117 91 24 2
2017 Sorry I'm late, a bunch of blowhards were using the elevator. 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2018 You think you're good but there's two guys in the next elevator blowing their trumpet. 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2019 Our next number is by request. We're going to play "Far, Far Away". 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2020 Jump in ! The other elevator has seventy six trombones....... 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2021 And now, Dueling Tubas Present 'Flight of the Bumblebee. 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2022 Sorry, but we didn't like the elevator music. 1.2393 0.04317 117 91 24 2
2023 Johnny decides to take the stairs this time because the Tuba Twins always push his buttons. 1.2393 0.04485 117 92 22 3
2024 Really, Gerald, these capacity limits are so discriminating. 1.2393 0.04317 117 91 24 2
2025 We're only taking requests from one to three today. 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2026 Streets are empty. But hey - born to busk. 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2027 Hey!!! Eyes down here. 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2028 Any chance there's a fife in that case? 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2029 It's a blast going down. 1.2393 0.04317 117 91 24 2
2030 Loud mouth. 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2031 We all have our ups and downs so I suggest you take the next one. 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2032 It's Showtime , sucker. 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2033 But if we took the stairs we'd be the no wind section. 1.2393 0.04485 117 92 22 3
2034 Before you ask; no, we didn’t coordinate outfits. 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2035 Can you see our room key? I think I just dropped it" 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2036 We're social distancing. 1.2393 0.04485 117 92 22 3
2037 Two tubas to tower two. 1.2393 0.04485 117 92 22 3
2038 5th Floor, Coming Up!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
2039 We were sent to enforce social distancing 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2040 Building management is now offering live elevator music to encourage residents to take the stairs. 1.2393 0.05100 117 96 14 7
2041 And there hasn't been any more complaints about the elevator music since. 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2042 Please, tell me you’ve cleared your spit valves?! 1.2393 0.04802 117 94 18 5
2043 Sorry, New Yorker staff contributor, Andy Borowitz. We, a vastly more tolerable comedic sousaphone ensemble, are here to replace you. If you pack up your things, we are happy to comically accompany you out the door. 1.2373 0.04915 118 96 16 6
2044 Do you know which clinic does spit valve cleaning? 1.2373 0.04113 118 91 26 1
2045 Due to social distancing and the amount of spittle we spew you should wait until the next one. 1.2373 0.04451 118 93 22 3
2046 It’s not like we want to practice in here, but the woodwinds already called the stairwell. 1.2368 0.04712 114 91 19 4
2047 No worries — the flute section is practicing on the other elevator. 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2048 Unless you play the flute, there is no room. 1.2348 0.04337 115 93 19 3
2049 There'll be more room when the flutists come down. 1.2348 0.04158 115 89 25 1
2050 Yes...two tubas. Two. Two tubas. And if you give us any more crap about it we'll start playing them. 1.2348 0.04676 115 92 19 4
2051 Don't look so surprised; these are the best social distancing tools we could find. 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2052 Hey, the acoustics are terrible in here, mister music critic! 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2053 They're exactly 6' wide. You're welcome! 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2054 Nothing like a little elevator music to get the day started, eh? 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2055 Wanna join us? Noah’s building a boat and insists we board “Tuba:Two.” 1.2348 0.04676 115 92 19 4
2056 For your information, its titled "Concerto for Tubas in an elevator" By Otis 1.2348 0.04676 115 92 19 4
2057 We’re encouraging social distancing 1.2348 0.04337 115 90 23 2
2058 If you say "omm-pah pah" I'll kill you. 1.2348 0.04337 115 90 23 2
2059 Now sorry that he taught two tubas to toot. 1.2348 0.04337 115 90 23 2
2060 I told you live elevator music was a bad idea. 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2061 You guys need to Cello Out! 1.2348 0.04836 115 93 17 5
2062 We are trying Einstein's Zurich trolley experiment with tubas. 1.2348 0.04836 115 93 17 5
2063 Sorry, we have one tuba many. 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2064 Does this go to eleven? 1.2348 0.04676 115 92 19 4
2065 Surely, you speak in jest. 1.2348 0.04991 115 94 15 6
2066 Well you see, with this thing on no one wants to get within six feet of us 1.2348 0.04158 115 92 22 1
2067 I can’t even be ten pounds heavier than the last guy and he got a pair of flutists! 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2068 The woodwinds are in the other elevator. The strings arrived earlier; and the conductor always rides up alone. 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2069 Well this blows. 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2070 You're going to need a mask. 1.2348 0.03773 115 91 23 1
2071 Sorry,only uninfected sousaphone players allowed in the elevator. 1.2348 0.04836 115 93 17 5
2072 Which way to Times Square? 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2073 Sorry, , but it definitely helps with social distancing. 1.2348 0.04510 115 91 21 3
2074 Your money or we blow you up...3,...2,...1,...deep breath... 1.2348 0.04836 115 93 17 5
2075 Sorry guys I only play the piano 1.2348 0.04337 115 90 23 2
2076 According to the inspection certificate, it's safe to cram in two more Sousaphones. 1.2328 0.04475 116 92 21 3
2077 If you SBD in the elevator, we'll provide an appropriate sound. 1.2328 0.04798 116 94 17 5
2078 The other 74 are waiting on the 9th floor. 1.2328 0.05101 116 96 13 7
2079 For social distancing, these are second only to bagpipes. 1.2328 0.04798 116 94 17 5
2080 No. We're two sousaphones, not two buhs. 1.2328 0.04640 116 93 19 4
2081 The elevator bells are out of order... 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2082 It was the only building with enough floors to fit the whole marching band. 1.2301 0.04534 113 95 13 5
2083 We take requests. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2084 Social distancing is going quite well. Why do you ask? 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2085 We're just coming up for air 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2086 It's how we enforce social distancing. 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2087 Sorry. It only goes down. 1.2301 0.04356 113 91 19 3
2088 The concert season was cancelled so enjoy your new elevator muzak. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2089 I guess that's one way to social distance. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2090 Still think somebody farted in the elevator? 1.2301 0.04171 113 94 15 4
2091 You didn't need to play your tubas. I would have kept way more than a social distance just at the sight of them. 1.2301 0.05030 113 93 14 6
2092 There's no denying it now. She must be close. The fat lady. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2093 They help us social distance especially when we play. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2094 You wanted a wood 2x4? The message said, would you get Tuba on the floor ! 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2095 It's the company's new live elevator music to ensure social distancing. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2096 Sorry, you'll have to wait. This elevator has a two tone limit 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2097 Grab your tuba. We’ll wait for you. 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2098 Our elevator music is now in stereo! 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2099 Are you sure you want to risk getting stuck in an elevator with us? 1.2301 0.04171 113 91 20 2
2100 They are called Sousaphones. We will be playing your funeral dirge on them as we descend to hell. Oh yeah, and your dead, and these elevators only go down. Sorry bud. 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2101 Sousaphones only. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2102 The bad news is the speakers are busted, no Muzak. Good news? We’re taking requests. 1.2301 0.04171 113 88 24 1
2103 I thought the bell ringing when the elevator comes annoying, but this...... 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2104 Good morning Sir, In case you couldn’t tell We are the Saints We are marching in 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2105 Were here for the Flatulence solo. 1.2301 0.03773 113 92 19 2
2106 Piccolo? 1.2301 0.05030 113 93 14 6
2107 Hi, Sir. May we interest you in some elevator music? 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2108 Up or down...tempo. 1.2301 0.03558 113 92 20 1
2109 ''Come on in ,We will be getting off on floor 76 ." 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2110 We are going between 7-6 looking for the trombones 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2111 We’re just gonna blow off the concert. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2112 Welcome to the elevator concerts! Before you pass, the other option is accordians. 1.2301 0.04356 113 94 15 4
2113 Taking up the only elevator- you got a lot of brass!! 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2114 We’re Siamese tubas- this IS our social distance.” 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2115 You don't happen to play the piccolo... 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2116 We’re scientists trying to determine whether the virus can be killed by sound waves. 1.2301 0.05030 113 93 14 6
2117 You’re going to need to back waaay up to get enough social distance from us, buddy. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2118 The top brass wouldn‘t take a meeting. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2119 Is this the 40-yard line? 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2120 There's always room for a piccolo. 1.2301 0.04870 113 94 13 6
2121 We just practice here for the acoustics. You're welcome to join us. 1.2301 0.04171 113 88 24 1
2122 We are from New Orleans, brother 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2123 With an iPhone all you can do is make calls and surf the net. 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2124 We were hired by Don Cortino to blow you away. 1.2301 0.05030 113 93 14 6
2125 We're looking for Floor 2-buh. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2126 It's tubad there's no room in there. 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2127 It’s the way tuba players do social distancing. 1.2301 0.04171 113 88 24 1
2128 No, get in while you can. There were 76 trombones behind us. 1.2301 0.04171 113 88 24 1
2129 Theme from 'Shaft'; duh! 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2130 Please tell me you don't have a Cello. 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2131 Next up: Flight of the Bumblebee! 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2132 Is this OSU? We're hear for the "dot the i" tryouts 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2133 Up-beat distancing! 1.2301 0.04356 113 94 15 4
2134 Your tickets are for the second movement 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2135 Stereo 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2136 Sure, we can honor your request, but "Flight of the Bumblebee" will only take you to the 10th floor. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2137 Is this the Tuba Players Convention Floor? 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2138 We're going all the way down, I'm afraid. 1.2301 0.04171 113 88 24 1
2139 Are you going up or down an octave? 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2140 Really unusual elevator music. 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2141 We heard from Spielberg you were looking for a tuba duet for your next picture, and since we just happen to be in the elevator… 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2142 We couldn't afford the Muzak fees. This is all original material." 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2143 We do have an open spot in the strings section if you are interested. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2144 You're welcome to join, just know it's gonna be a bumpy ride. 1.2301 0.03558 113 95 15 3
2145 Count us as two for the census 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2146 We got tired of elevator music. 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2147 It's not every elevator that has live music. 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2148 We only have a mezzanine seat left. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2149 Sorry, we're going down an octave. 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2150 I take it you don't want my autograph. 1.2301 0.04171 113 88 24 1
2151 Brassholes! 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2152 Get in, you look like you want to have the most uncomfortable elevator ride of your life. 1.2301 0.04705 113 93 15 5
2153 I used to play the trumpet, then 2016 happened. 1.2301 0.04356 113 93 16 4
2154 What other sousaphone player? 1.2301 0.04171 113 88 24 1
2155 It's my last day at the office and I decided to go out on a high note 1.2301 0.04171 113 88 24 1
2156 Sousaphones. Not tubas. Sousaphones. 1.2301 0.05030 113 93 14 6
2157 You're right. We really should be practicing Sousal distancing. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2158 Sorry. Trying to be uplifting takes a lot of room. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2159 It's all about that bass. 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2160 Oh, Hello, you must be our new tenant. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2161 That's wierd on any level. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2162 Stereo is by request only, but you’ll have to tip the guy in back. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2163 It’s a bit windy in here. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2164 The elevator music is out so the super asked us to fill in. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2165 Hi. I'm John. My brother Philip. Have you seen Sousa? 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2166 Until the elevator speakers are repaired we'll take requests for any of your favorite Muzak tunes. 1.2301 0.04534 113 92 17 4
2167 I can’t believe the clerk didn’t get our “room for two-ba” joke. 1.2301 0.05030 113 93 14 6
2168 This is not exactly Federal Guidelines for Covid-19, but management thought that it was a good way to limit the number of people in the elevator.We have tested negative, so for us this is just a gig. 1.2301 0.04171 113 88 24 1
2169 What genre of elevator music might you fancy today? 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2170 This next song we’re taking straight to the top! 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2171 We're so much better than the farting that usually goes on in here 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2172 Sorry, trombones are on the fourth floor. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2173 We're what's left of the boys in the band. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2174 Well together these gave us our six feet of distance, but now what? 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2175 Je suis foutu! 1.2301 0.04534 113 93 16 4
2176 Could you point us toward the wake? 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2177 I see you are new to DC, this is a bullshit flotation device, young man. 1.2301 0.05030 113 93 14 6
2178 Tuba's?, or not Tuba's? That is your decision if your going to use this elevator. 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2179 These were the last two super-sized rolls of toilet paper, so don't bother going down. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2180 Come on in. It's the newest thing in elevator music. The acoustics in here are amazing!! 1.2301 0.04870 113 92 16 5
2181 Are you ready to polka the night away? 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2182 There’s even less room with the string section 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2183 ...we were just looking for a little symphony, pal 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2184 We’re taking requests; unfortunately, the rest of the orchestra is trapped on the cruise ship 1.2301 0.04356 113 89 22 2
2185 Great! We need your piccolo for proper balance. 1.2301 0.04356 113 91 19 3
2186 Care to be the guinea pig for our newest elevator music piece? 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2187 Pardon us, the acoustics in here are wonderful. 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2188 Acoustically, it's preferable to scaling the stairs. 1.2301 0.04171 113 88 24 1
2189 Sorry, we’re over the weight limit. 1.2281 0.04323 114 90 22 2
2190 We're going floor to floor playing inspiring music from 6 feet away - what would you like to hear in the next 15 seconds? 1.2281 0.04499 114 91 20 3
2191 Don't laugh; it makes social distancing really easy. 1.2281 0.04668 114 92 18 4
2192 Yes, that *is* a really large pair of binoculars behind us. 1.2281 0.04668 114 92 18 4
2193 Do you want to see how low we can go? 1.2281 0.04323 114 90 22 2
2194 Sousa Express 1.2281 0.04831 114 93 16 5
2195 But Why? Elevator music was just fine. 1.2281 0.04499 114 91 20 3
2196 Come on in, unless you hate elevator music. 1.2281 0.04499 114 91 20 3
2197 HR felt that a bit of elevator music would increase morale 1.2281 0.04499 114 91 20 3
2198 The bellboy is sick today, so I brought a tuba. 1.2281 0.04323 114 90 22 2
2199 And a One and a Two and.. 1.2281 0.04831 114 93 16 5
2200 We're just going out to give some air. 1.2281 0.04831 114 93 16 5
2201 It's Tuba Tuesday. 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2202 I'm sorry but we don't take requests. 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2203 Which floor is the CEO on? We're the top brass he sent for. 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2204 Hi, we’re looking for the thirteenth floor tuba orchestra. 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2205 They help us maintain proper social distancing. 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2206 The fewer, the merrier. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2207 No Thanks, I'm waiting for the tuba players. 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2208 Oom pah. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2209 ...and it blows your breathe away. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2210 Stand aside friend. We are the Tuba section of the Purdue University Alumni Band occupying the Seventh Floor 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2211 ''woomp woomp'' I guess you'll have to wait 10 minutes for the next elevator. 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2212 We were hired because the Muzak is not working. 1.2273 0.04217 110 86 23 1
2213 We only have room for a piccolo player. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2214 The pool isn't on this floor 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2215 Sous-picious 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2216 Phil, make room for the harmonica player! 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2217 People are tired of recorded elevator music. 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2218 Do you like elevator jazz, Mark? 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2219 So sorry neighbor, we're still on the look for the proper home-based office spot. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2220 We're playing one floor at a time following the six foot rule. 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2221 If you think wearing inner tubes is weird,wait till you see what the guy behind us is wearing. 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2222 13th floor? 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2223 So you see toilet paper in everything? 1.2273 0.05111 110 91 13 6
2224 Hey neighbor. You quarantined too? 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2225 How to hyper spread Coronavirus 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2226 We are still playing But keeping our social distance. 1.2273 0.04217 110 88 20 2
2227 Self-Quarantine, Please! 1.2273 0.03333 110 88 22 0
2228 They hired live musicians to ease people's anxiety on their way to work...favorite song? 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2229 We don’t take requests. 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2230 Oh, good. You play the kazoo... hop in!! 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2231 Did you order two or three sousaphones? 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2232 We were told the elevator music needed a bass section. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2233 That's one way to ensure appropriate distancing! 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2234 Whoops, meant to go down a few octaves. 1.2273 0.05111 110 91 13 6
2235 Fair warning, we only play one song, "Dueling Tubas". 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2236 Sorry, only Tubas at a time. 1.2273 0.04217 110 86 23 1
2237 It could be worse, we could be cello players" 1.2273 0.04014 110 87 22 1
2238 We play as it’s going down. 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2239 I warn you. We only know Tubular Bells. 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2240 Please come in. We can't reach the buttons. 1.2273 0.04217 110 86 23 1
2241 It was our last chance to hit number one. 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2242 There's no Muzak here at Trump Tower! 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2243 Muzak's elevator channel was down so here we are with live music. Going up? 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2244 Stairs are for trumpet players. 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2245 You called to ask for a Tuba legation. 1.2273 0.05111 110 91 13 6
2246 Our Flat is on E 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2247 Forget it, buddy. They'll only sell them to you in pairs. 1.2273 0.03801 110 90 18 2
2248 NO MADAM, We are NOT headed to the pool! 1.2273 0.04410 110 89 18 3
2249 They really should have specified 8 PM! 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2250 All right, I guess things can get worse. 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2251 Thanks but I’m waiting on the woodwind elevator. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2252 You wouldn't believe how effective this is in maintaining social distance. 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2253 We’re going down. Waaay down! 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2254 There are 101 Cornets close behind! 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2255 I know, right? 1.2273 0.04217 110 86 23 1
2256 Step on in, we have our elevator pitch already. 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2257 With this baby, I can fart on the elevator with impunity. 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2258 Mask? what mask? The Coronavirus will be blown away! 1.2273 0.04945 110 90 15 5
2259 We have questions for David S. Pumpkins. Is this his floor? 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2260 'We're are stuck in this bloody elevator." 1.2273 0.04773 110 89 17 4
2261 You’ll have to wait for the next car if you want woodwinds. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2262 ...and that's how you make an entrance. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2263 We're trying to see how low we can go. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2264 This is what happens when you go all out on your video application. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2265 Hello, welcome to our elevator. For your musical enjoyment we will be playing John Phillips Sousa's greatest marches. [Lucie Casares] 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2266 Melody or harmony? 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2267 Take the next one. We’re contained in hopes of securing the bass line. 1.2273 0.04217 110 88 20 2
2268 So social distancing dictates that 2 men, 2 tubas means this car is full. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2269 Think of it as how nature would say “Take the stairs.” 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2270 We're social media influenzas, going viral on YouTuba! 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2271 Never fails, Tuba City has the best elevator music! 1.2273 0.04410 110 87 21 2
2272 We're headed to the Tubist Convention; Your instrument is your badge. 1.2222 0.04620 108 87 18 3
2273 The door's open at lobby, and the Show starts at 8. 1.2222 0.04804 108 88 16 4
2274 It’s like Muzak. But with tubas. 1.2222 0.04620 108 87 18 3
2275 This pandemic is making me feel uncomfortably close to you 1.2222 0.04229 108 89 16 3
2276 Sure, it’s a tad squeezy, but the acoustics are insane. 1.2222 0.04981 108 89 14 5
2277 We're the "new normal" version of elevator music. 1.2222 0.04229 108 85 22 1
2278 The stairs, if you please - the elevator is reserved for low brass. 1.2222 0.04620 108 87 18 3
2279 The building is improving their Muzak! 1.2222 0.04981 108 89 14 5
2280 We need a piccolo....is that a piccolo? 1.2222 0.04429 108 86 20 2
2281 We live in the apartment below you. Could you PLEASE stop that stomping? 1.2222 0.04804 108 88 16 4
2282 Yeah, it's elevator music for people who like oompah. 1.2222 0.04429 108 86 20 2
2283 Quick, before the doors close...think of a number be...” 1.2222 0.04981 108 89 14 5
2284 Take the stairs, dickhead. 1.2222 0.04981 108 89 14 5
2285 [extremely loud farting noise] that was, uhhhhh, that was the sousaphone 1.2222 0.04229 108 85 22 1
2286 When they said having two large honkers is helpful in an interview I’m not sure this is what they meant 1.2222 0.04620 108 87 18 3
2287 It was a tuba-for-one sale. 1.2222 0.04620 108 87 18 3
2288 There's plenty of room! What, you already have enough oompah in your life? 1.2222 0.04429 108 86 20 2
2289 Keeps people 6 feet away. 1.2222 0.04429 108 86 20 2
2290 The other residents asked for no Muzak. 1.2222 0.04981 108 89 14 5
2291 This elevator has live Oompa music. 1.2222 0.04229 108 87 19 2
2292 My dislike for elevator music is rising 1.2222 0.04429 108 86 20 2
2293 Call 911. This tuba has a gun to my back. 1.2222 0.04804 108 88 16 4
2294 I think I'll wait for the next one. 1.2222 0.03798 108 85 23 0
2295 Tuby dooby doo! 1.2222 0.05151 108 90 12 6
2296 Unemployment? 1.2222 0.04620 108 87 18 3
2297 Sorry, he broke wind. 1.2222 0.05151 108 90 12 6
2298 I still think we should have just Netflixed and chilled. 1.2222 0.04429 108 86 20 2
2299 Did you see a band march by here? 1.2222 0.04620 108 87 18 3
2300 Take the stairway and stay on the right side even if you are from Britain. 1.2222 0.04981 108 89 14 5
2301 Hum a few bars of Sousa's Liberty Bell for Tuba and we might let you in." Joan Cashel, Los Angeles, C 1.2222 0.04620 108 89 15 4
2302 Do you want to play the triangle? 1.2222 0.04229 108 85 22 1
2303 No,we are not a Hall & Oates cover band. 1.2222 0.04804 108 88 16 4
2304 don't worry, we'll use our inside voices 1.2222 0.04429 108 86 20 2
2305 Are there a bunch of guys in lederhosen on this floor? 1.2222 0.04981 108 89 14 5
2306 People just naturally keep back 6 feet. 1.2222 0.04019 108 86 21 1
2307 Are you not entertained? 1.2222 0.04429 108 86 20 2
2308 The acoustics are terrible. 1.2222 0.04981 108 89 14 5
2309 You don't want to know what's going to happen tomorrow. Remember, the first day was the flute. 1.2222 0.04804 108 88 16 4
2310 Please take the other elevator. The flutes, piccolos and the triangle player are on that one. 1.2202 0.04195 109 88 19 2
2311 If you’re more in the mood for piano, the freight elevator is to your right. 1.2202 0.04764 109 89 16 4
2312 These are the 2 new ventilators for the ICU on the 12th floor. 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2313 They told us we would need a lot of brass to succeed in New York City. 1.2190 0.04684 105 85 17 3
2314 The acoustics in here are awesome! 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2315 Sorry, the lobby sousaphone was out of order" 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2316 We're substituting for Muzak today. 1.2190 0.04684 105 85 17 3
2317 Yeah, so just give me a call if you’re interested in becoming a member if Tubonic Plague. 1.2190 0.05238 105 88 11 6
2318 And now, for our elevator pitch. 1.2190 0.04684 105 85 17 3
2319 The accordion players are in the next elevator. 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2320 More like sixty feet away ... 1.2190 0.04276 105 83 21 1
2321 We're keeping marching bands alive, one elevator at a time.” 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2322 Sorry, It's Occupy Tuba Day. You'll have to walk up. 1.2190 0.05060 105 87 13 5
2323 The spittle is in the mouthpiece. 1.2190 0.04056 105 82 23 0
2324 Elevator music is now by request. 1.2190 0.04276 105 83 21 1
2325 Gee, I always thought it was a recording. 1.2190 0.04276 105 83 21 1
2326 Sorry,wrong floor. We’re the roof orchestra 1.2190 0.04056 105 82 23 0
2327 I missed the memo that it was bring your Tuba to work day. 1.2190 0.04056 105 82 23 0
2328 We're going places. 1.2190 0.04485 105 88 13 4
2329 Being with this band has its ups and downs. 1.2190 0.04684 105 85 17 3
2330 Good Boys Do Fine Always. We're going down to Always. 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2331 We're on our way to make someone late. 1.2190 0.04876 105 86 15 4
2332 This is our unique approach to elevator music. 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2333 guy: ill wait for the next elevator. there's no space. tuba men: there's plenty of space. guy: where I don't see any space. tuba men: hop in the tubas duh. guy: umm... I'm ok ill just wait. tuba men: suit yourself. 1.2190 0.03576 105 91 11 3
2334 We have to stay at least six feet from the trombones. 1.2190 0.04276 105 83 21 1
2335 The lobby is up an octave. 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2336 Don’t you dare, or else we will clean our spit valves out 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2337 2B or not TUBA ? 1.2190 0.04684 105 85 17 3
2338 Not gonna try to kiss, hug, or touch you; let me in the elevator. 1.2190 0.04684 105 85 17 3
2339 Quick! Which way to the restrooms? Preferably bidets. 1.2190 0.04684 105 85 17 3
2340 I'm sorry, there's no room. Unless you're a woodwind. 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2341 You know you're in a classy hotel when they have live elevator music. 1.2190 0.04485 105 84 19 2
2342 We were exceeding capacity so our drummer left as a percussion. 1.2190 0.04684 105 85 17 3
2343 Come on…We’re gonna audio bomb the piano bar. 1.2170 0.04645 106 86 17 3
2344 Sorry, we've got one tuba many in here! 1.2170 0.04834 106 87 15 4
2345 Yes, they do resemble Sousaphones but they’re vortexes to another dimension. Want to go for a ride? 1.2157 0.04751 102 83 16 3
2346 Come on in. We can make roompha for you. 1.2157 0.04323 102 81 20 1
2347 "Can you help us find B flat? 1.2157 0.04542 102 82 18 2
2348 Sousaphone practice is on floors 4, 6, 8, & 10. 1.2150 0.04309 107 88 16 3
2349 That's fine I'll wait for the strings. 1.2136 0.04503 103 83 18 2
2350 it's the only place in New Orleans we could practice social distancing! 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2351 We have a meeting upstairs with the top brass. 1.2136 0.04286 103 84 17 2
2352 For your information they are called social distancing devices! 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2353 I'm sorry, this elevator is only for tubas. 1.2136 0.04503 103 83 18 2
2354 Hey Jim! We're headed up to the bosses office to quit with style, there's an extra tuba if you want in 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2355 Can you direct us to the apartment where toilet paper is being exchanged for services? 1.2136 0.04503 103 83 18 2
2356 Our elevator music is not TUBAD! 1.2136 0.04907 103 85 14 4
2357 No, you take the melody. I can play just two notes. 1.2136 0.04503 103 83 18 2
2358 We can't play a note but it helps keep the right social distance 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2359 Actually we're getting down. 1.2136 0.04286 103 82 20 1
2360 Come in. There's plenty of room-pa-pa. 1.2136 0.04907 103 85 14 4
2361 You think we're bad, the tympanists are on their way up. 1.2136 0.04907 103 85 14 4
2362 Was möchten Sie hören? 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2363 That's one way to make sure strangers stay 6 feet away. 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2364 Excuse me, which way to the nearest brasserie 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2365 No room. There's a piano behind us. 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2366 C'mon, there's enough room for more than a double bass. Hop in. 1.2136 0.04907 103 85 14 4
2367 People on the upper floors say we really put the "forever" in "Stars and Stripes Forever." 1.2136 0.04907 103 85 14 4
2368 Always room for one more in the tuba section. 1.2136 0.04286 103 82 20 1
2369 My god, not one but two full metal jackets 1.2136 0.04503 103 83 18 2
2370 Is this the Trump Tower? We’re whats's left of the marching band. 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2371 We’re here to give you more Oomph! 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2372 Come on in. 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2373 Attention shoppers . . . 1.2136 0.05098 103 86 12 5
2374 John Philip Sousa, I presume? 1.2136 0.04286 103 82 20 1
2375 Going up then down then up then down, up, down, up, down... 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2376 And now, our rendition of Aerosmith's 'Love in an Elevator' 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2377 Do you play? 1.2136 0.04503 103 83 18 2
2378 Well don't just stand there, start polkaing! 1.2136 0.04503 103 85 15 3
2379 Stay home! 1.2136 0.04907 103 85 14 4
2380 My son and I have never had an issue with social distancing. 1.2136 0.04907 103 85 14 4
2381 Step right in if you're in the mood to get soused. 1.2136 0.04286 103 82 20 1
2382 Please hold your applause between movements. 1.2136 0.04286 103 82 20 1
2383 "Don't worry, the buttons have been disinfected." 1.2136 0.04907 103 85 14 4
2384 Stay 6 feet apart. 1.2136 0.04286 103 82 20 1
2385 Oh, thank God it's not John. 1.2136 0.05098 103 86 12 5
2386 I've always hated elevator music. 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2387 We wanted to see how low this elevator can go. 1.2136 0.04503 103 83 18 2
2388 Can you play "Feelings" ? 1.2136 0.04503 103 83 18 2
2389 Up or downbeat?" 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2390 You do social distancing your way, and we'll do it our way. 1.2136 0.04286 103 82 20 1
2391 The stairwell acoustics sucked. 1.2115 0.04864 104 86 14 4
2392 The musak was insufferable. 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2393 We're the Tuba Twins ... hiding in plain sight. 1.2115 0.04250 104 86 16 2
2394 You look you’re swinging some brass. Hop in. 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2395 Take the next one, it's just the triangle's. 1.2115 0.04864 104 86 14 4
2396 We’ll play you are sanitized song. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2397 Now the government is paying us to clear the streets. We don't rock, but the gig does. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2398 Do you like elevator music cover bands? 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2399 They don't keep everyone distant, just girls. 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2400 We’re trying anything to go lower 1.2115 0.04024 104 82 22 0
2401 You have earplugs? 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2402 We got lost–looking for the mezzanine ... 1.2115 0.04864 104 86 14 4
2403 The hotel said this is the only area we could shelter in place 1.2115 0.04024 104 82 22 0
2404 We say “OOM!!“ You say “PAH“! 1.2115 0.04864 104 86 14 4
2405 We'll cover the sound. Pot pourri guys are on the next floor. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2406 This distraction provided by the NYSE as we all go down together. 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2407 Yes neighbor, our four roommates also play the tuba 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2408 Back up sir! We’re with the Bureau’ Of Social Distancing. 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2409 Folks got tired of the same old elevator music. 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2410 Ground floor. Time for our arrangement of "You Lift Me Up". 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2411 I don't usually toot my own horn, so we switched 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2412 I'll ride the next one 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2413 Get your brass in here! 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2414 Whatever happened to restrooms in the lobby? 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2415 It really facilitates social isolation. 1.2115 0.04250 104 85 17 2
2416 Two tubas going to two, too. Come on in. Toot, toot. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2417 Sure we have fevers, coughs, aches, and fatigue, but hey, the show must go on, right? 1.2115 0.04864 104 86 14 4
2418 Sorry, the lift is full 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2419 One day in Trumpet Towers... 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2420 The next car has the wind. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2421 These help us social distance. 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2422 Goin’ down, gettin’ funky. 1.2115 0.05234 104 88 10 6
2423 We just had a blast! 1.2115 0.05053 104 87 12 5
2424 What floor are the accordion musicians on? 1.2115 0.04864 104 86 14 4
2425 They enforce the 6 foot rule. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2426 Can we interest you in our Sousa-Distancing services? 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2427 Mask? I thought it was Brass! 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2428 Fucking coronavirus. 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2429 I hate Tuba Tuesday. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2430 We're just a pair of socially-distancing you-tubas. 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2431 We're looking for apartment D minor 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2432 Would you take the next one please? She's horny. 1.2115 0.03255 104 87 16 1
2433 Herbie and I have been social distancing since high school. 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2434 Is this the pool level? 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2435 I think I can fit in. My Piccolo is in the bag. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2436 Tubas. Too big. Too bad. 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2437 If you're going down we'll break out the slide whistle. 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2438 We lost our Muzak Budget. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2439 oops . . . wrong floor. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2440 We’re looking for the blowhards 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2441 Looking for 2B,eh? 1.2115 0.04864 104 86 14 4
2442 It's John Phillips Sousa until the fourth floor. 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2443 It's only down from here. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2444 'Oopsie daisy, I farted" 1.2115 0.04864 104 86 14 4
2445 This is our rehearsal space until we receive our stimulus checks. 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2446 There's r-oompah for one more! 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2447 Crowded? Yes. But, you won't think about COVID. 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2448 Washing your hands while singing 'Happy Birthday' fast? We came to set the tempo. 1.2115 0.05053 104 87 12 5
2449 The only gig we can get is playing elevator music. 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2450 The conductor insisted our high notes get higher. 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2451 Did you forget your social distance life preserver? 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2452 YouTuba? No thanks, I’ll take the Nexlift and chill 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2453 Scene from Tubatanic: “We’re going down.” 1.2115 0.04864 104 86 14 4
2454 Social Distancing Solution #18 "TU-BAd there is no room in this elevator" 1.2115 0.04250 104 83 20 1
2455 We got the last two social distancing horns." 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2456 Don’t bother. The balconies are all full. 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2457 We work for peanuts. 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2458 You say you’ve got a piccolo in the bag? Okay, join us. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2459 You may wish to maintain 6 feet of separation, sir. 1.2100 0.04333 100 80 19 1
2460 Finally - Heavy Metal Elevator Music! 1.2100 0.04984 100 83 13 4
2461 What, you were expecting piccolos? 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2462 We hope you love tuba duets as much as we do. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2463 We are oboe whisperers, they respond to us No worries 1.2100 0.04333 100 80 19 1
2464 If you stay at least six feet away, we won't play them. 1.2095 0.04426 105 85 18 2
2465 These are sousaphones. We have our marching orders. 1.2095 0.04426 105 85 18 2
2466 Haven't you ever heard of elevator music before? 1.2095 0.03754 105 86 18 1
2467 Oom-Pah-Pah or Dueling Tubas, your choice. 1.2095 0.04628 105 86 16 3
2468 We’re going to the bass man. 1.2095 0.04628 105 86 16 3
2469 We could use a lead singer. 1.2095 0.04628 105 86 16 3
2470 Not your father's elevator music. 1.2095 0.04214 105 84 20 1
2471 Never thought my first day at work would start like this... 1.2095 0.04214 105 84 20 1
2472 Two tubas to basement. Too bad. 1.2095 0.04426 105 85 18 2
2473 We'll lift your spirits. 1.2095 0.04214 105 84 20 1
2474 We disdain Musak. 1.2095 0.05008 105 88 12 5
2475 Going up an octave? 1.2095 0.04822 105 87 14 4
2476 I'll get the next one. 1.2095 0.04628 105 86 16 3
2477 I could offer my opinion. 1.2095 0.05008 105 88 12 5
2478 Sorry We wanted a quiet place to practice our music 1.2095 0.04822 105 87 14 4
2479 Smith on 18 is a real Sousaphonophile. 1.2095 0.04426 105 85 18 2
2480 We’re here for the Master Class in social distancing. 1.2095 0.04214 105 84 20 1
2481 We're reinventing elevator music. 1.2095 0.04214 105 84 20 1
2482 No chance mister. The rest of the band is getting on one floor below. 1.2095 0.04628 105 86 16 3
2483 No problem, we've got a spare. 1.2095 0.04628 105 88 13 4
2484 Prepare yourself 1.2095 0.04426 105 85 18 2
2485 The mariachi band was out sick and we were the only replacements for the corporate party. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2486 You will want to maintain 6 feet distance. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2487 Don't worry, there'll be room to ride up with flutists. 1.2079 0.04295 101 81 19 1
2488 Ah, there you are! 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2489 Sorry, but this elevator is reserved for the big brass. 1.2079 0.04295 101 81 19 1
2490 At 5.99 feet, we'll blow you away! 1.2079 0.04295 101 81 19 1
2491 Hey buddy, we invented social distancing. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2492 At least they won't *hear* me fart 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2493 You may now join the live stream. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2494 Tuba Tuesday 1.2079 0.04295 101 83 16 2
2495 Want to hear my elevator pitch? 1.2079 0.04058 101 80 21 0
2496 Did a matching band pass by you? 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2497 You can sit in it if you like 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2498 It was easier to get on. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2499 Come on in, we won’t play for tips! 1.2079 0.04939 101 84 13 4
2500 "You're the one that didn't want Muzak in the elevators. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2501 This is the bass-ment 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2502 I think that this is as high as we can go! 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2503 We're replacing the Manilow elevator music with Sousa. 1.2079 0.04295 101 81 19 1
2504 At least you won’t have to talk about the weather with us. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2505 No sir! They are NOT tubas, they are SOUSAPHONES! 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2506 Can you believe it? We’re heading to a funeral. 1.2079 0.04939 101 84 13 4
2507 You may as well squeeze in: the guy with the timpani is taking the stairs. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2508 Social distancing made easy. 1.2079 0.05135 101 85 11 5
2509 We are still working on a way to mask the smell. 1.2079 0.05135 101 85 11 5
2510 Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you! 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2511 Not six feet, but it certainly provides increasing distancing. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2512 Stand aside we're transporting Dolly Parton! 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2513 We lost the trombone players. 1.2079 0.04939 101 84 13 4
2514 Well if it isn't our old friend, the agoraphobic Mr. Blumling! 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2515 Staying 6,000,000 feet away from a tuba is the usual recommended guideline. We're so happy it's now only 6 feet. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2516 It’s better than the drummers’ car. 1.2079 0.04295 101 81 19 1
2517 Oh, that's why it's called tuba. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2518 When we play our tubas everybody keeps a social distance. 1.2079 0.05135 101 85 11 5
2519 Tax Assessor's Office? We do a wicked good Girl From Ipanema 1.2079 0.04058 101 87 11 3
2520 Sorry Bill, while you were away upper management changed the dress code aaaagain. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2521 's OK But Your Needed On An 18 Wheeler !! 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2522 Where's your banjo? 1.2079 0.04939 101 84 13 4
2523 You’ll have better luck with the piccolo section- they’re next. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2524 Tubas are better in pairs and not on escalators or on stairs. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2525 We are social distancing enforcers. Please back up now or we blow. 1.2079 0.04939 101 84 13 4
2526 Don't tell me—you'd like to horn in, too, buddy? 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2527 But... why? 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2528 No. The piccolo convention was last week. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2529 Please listen—everyone else is outside watching the parade! You have to get us out of... 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2530 We're in love. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2531 We’re going as low as you can go. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2532 We're a little done with marching. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2533 Sure there’s room, as long as you play saxophone. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2534 Sorry, we couldn't find masks for ourselves or the tubas. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2535 One of the company perks is live Muzak. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2536 Because Muzak got so boring" 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2537 We’re heading to the Kennedy center , they got their money! 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2538 Did you see the rest of the orchestra walk by? 1.2079 0.04939 101 84 13 4
2539 We now have live elevator music 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2540 Yes Sir. Two sousaphones for the price of one is our elevator music pledge, going up or going down. 1.2079 0.04734 101 83 15 3
2541 Is this the floor for the Sanchez Bar Mitzvah ? 1.2075 0.04388 106 86 18 2
2542 Don't worry, we can lend you a tuba. 1.2075 0.04388 106 86 18 2
2543 It's like singing in the shower. 1.2075 0.04780 106 88 14 4
2544 So don't come in, then. Do we give a hoot? 1.2075 0.04388 106 86 18 2
2545 Be patient, the French horns will be along soon. 1.2075 0.04179 106 85 20 1
2546 Push the Down-The-Tubas button, please. 1.2059 0.04480 102 83 17 2
2547 Just here to help with your social distancing " 1.2041 0.04342 98 79 18 1
2548 I SAID, IT'S ELEVATOR MUSIC FOR THE DEFT! 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
2549 You know Jeff, there's more than one way to social distance. 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
2550 I can't believe we went to the wrong "heavy metal" convention. 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
2551 It’s Symphony Distancing. The piano’s in the lobby and the elevator to your right will feature a violin & cello when it reaches your floor. 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2552 it encourages social distancing 1.2041 0.05222 98 83 10 5
2553 We thought a live marching band instead of the usual elevator music would give everyone a lift. 1.2041 0.04342 98 79 18 1
2554 Remember social distancing, fella. And where's your sousaphone? 1.2041 0.05016 98 82 12 4
2555 We got cut from the brass section again,so we need a good lift. 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2556 ...abummp bummp bummp... Hey, it’s six feet pal! 1.2041 0.04342 98 79 18 1
2557 We've got room if your are a piccolo player 1.2041 0.05222 98 83 10 5
2558 The piccolos are real bullies! 1.2041 0.05222 98 83 10 5
2559 Now I know what you're thinking, "Tuba for elevator music?" 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
2560 Breaking wind on an Elevator, how original... 1.2041 0.05222 98 83 10 5
2561 It's called Uber Music. Look us up! 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2562 "Sorry,this "boom pah pah" elevator is full." 1.2041 0.05222 98 83 10 5
2563 Don't even think about blaming your fart on one of our tubas. 1.2041 0.04342 98 79 18 1
2564 Gosh, when the pandemic ends, we should learn how to play these things. 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
2565 If you can’t get a face mask, try wearing a tuba...it’s good for social distancing 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
2566 The Muzak system is being repaired, so we're here taking requests." 1.2041 0.04092 98 80 17 1
2567 Thanks, but organists are the best at social distancing. 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
2568 I know, you were expecting a couple of cute, young violinists. 1.2041 0.05016 98 82 12 4
2569 Up-pah-pah! 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2570 It ensures people keep their distance. 1.2041 0.05016 98 82 12 4
2571 We found copies of Beethoven's last movement! 1.2041 0.05016 98 82 12 4
2572 I'd get on now...the next car is full of accordions. 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2573 We got separated... have you seen a marching band go by...? 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
2574 We're boomers, here for the big horny convention. 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
2575 Sorry you can’t get in. We’re Tuba distancing 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2576 Aaaaahhh, aaaah, aaaaah, aaaah-chooo... That'll keep him out of the elevator for now. 1.2041 0.04342 98 83 12 3
2577 We need protective masks, gloves, and earplugs." 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2578 Plenty of room if you play piccolo. 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2579 Grassroots campaign. To increase public appreciation. 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2580 Dinah, won’t you blow 1.2041 0.05016 98 82 12 4
2581 Fourth floor: Perfumery, haberdashery and sousaphones." 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2582 No, things don't always happen in 3s. 1.2041 0.04802 98 81 14 3
2583 Sorry, you will not hear elevator music on your ride up 1.2041 0.04342 98 79 18 1
2584 We're twins who didn't get properly weaned. 1.2041 0.04577 98 80 16 2
2585 Surround sound 1.2041 0.05016 98 82 12 4
2586 I'm taking elevator music to a whole new level. 1.2041 0.05016 98 82 12 4
2587 Going up?" "No, decrescendo. 1.2041 0.05016 98 82 12 4
2588 maybe just take the other elevator 1.2041 0.05016 98 82 12 4
2589 Lemme guess. They didn't explain what being entubated means, right? 1.2021 0.04682 94 77 15 2
2590 These elevators are really adagio right now. Take the stairs, they're more vivace. 1.2021 0.04430 94 76 17 1
2591 I'm sorry, this elevator is for bass clef only. 1.2020 0.04758 99 82 14 3
2592 Who knew respirators are so noisy? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2593 Help! This giant frog's wrapped us up in his tongue! 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2594 You're fired. Clean out your spit valve by the end of this week. 1.2000 0.04637 95 80 12 3
2595 You wouldn't happen to have a bassoon in that bag, would you? 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2596 What? You don’t like elevator music? 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2597 There's still room between the Um and the Pa Pa. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2598 We only have room for a piccolo. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2599 The acoustics are fatastic! 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2600 How about the theme from Star Wars? 1.2000 0.04126 95 76 19 0
2601 Muzak Unplugged 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2602 If you will just come in, that'll be exactly six feet." 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2603 Yes, crescendo means going up... 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2604 We were asked to lower our tone. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2605 Real sousaphones hang on your shoulder. These were half price. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2606 Did you order the sousaphones? 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2607 Hey, where's your tuba? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2608 There's room for a harmonica player! 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2609 Thank goodness / I have gas 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2610 If I have to play the Jaws theme tune again Barney I'll pass out - can we let this one in? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2611 Guarantees social distancing. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2612 Can you tell us which floor John Philip Sousa lives on? 1.2000 0.05097 95 80 11 4
2613 Do you know what floor the umm-pa-pa convention is on? 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2614 The elevator bell isn't working. 1.2000 0.04126 95 76 19 0
2615 We came to tell you don't show up tomorrow. 1.2000 0.05312 95 81 9 5
2616 Sorry, we need a sax player. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2617 Sorry. This elevator is only for the big brass. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2618 Don't look so shocked, there's seventy-four more to come down. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2619 They really didn't think this live elevator-music thing through. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2620 They help us in social distancing in tight spaces. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2621 Is this the Lido deck? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2622 There's plenty of room for a piccolo. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2623 There would be more of us but people only want to hear the blues. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2624 Take the stairs, we bumped into all the buttons. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2625 And now we'd like to do Flight of the Bumblebee 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2626 Come on in, we'll make bass for you. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2627 You can't go lower. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2628 May we social distance you? 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2629 We're your new next door neighbors! If you'd like to jam, please join us any night after dinner till lights out. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2630 SETI tuba rehearsal, friend. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2631 sorry buddy, no room, this guy just had to bring his huge binoculars with him! 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2632 Our apologies . . . the banjo player is sick, today! 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2633 You going up, down or waiting for the next elevator? 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2634 It helps us with our social distancing. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2635 You're welcome to join us. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2636 Try the stairs; he next elevator has the string section, the one after that, the piano . . . 1.2000 0.04126 95 80 13 2
2637 Not until we finish the last few bars of 'Oskee-wow-wow!' 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2638 (Present day trump tower) Oompa Loompa Doo Pah Dee Doo 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2639 Fifth floor? Come on in, we're going to the deafness trade show. 1.2000 0.04389 95 79 14 2
2640 You know, you should social distance from each other, too, right? 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2641 She’s got Bette Davis eyes... 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2642 Trust me! Stairway to Heaven sounds much better in stereo. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2643 Are you taking requests? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2644 I never expected the Tuba Inquisition. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2645 The rest of the orchestra took the stairs. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2646 Is there room for a piccalo? 1.2000 0.05097 95 80 11 4
2647 We're the back-up band. Is this the Titanic? 1.2000 0.05097 95 80 11 4
2648 Elevator Blues for Tuba on one, two, three, four...hit it!" 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2649 I think they ask right now that elevator occupancy be limited to two persons at a time. Sorry. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2650 Sorry, the New Yorker is not taking any more elevator music captions. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2651 May we suggest Flight of the Bumblebee in A minor for your ride this morning 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2652 We're working on a new kind of elevator music that should be more lifting. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2653 No! Blow your own horn. 1.2000 0.04126 95 76 19 0
2654 Thanks anyway. I'd prefer to listen to fiddlers on my way up. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2655 Your belts look good but what's up with the Cannons? 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2656 We accept tips for not playing your favorite tune on the way down. 1.2000 0.04126 95 76 19 0
2657 We gave up on the bagpipes. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2658 Well, yes or no? 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2659 Did you happen to see a short guy with a sackbut? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2660 We're getting down to the bassment. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2661 We were to meet Joe Venuti if front of the building, but he did not show.” (True story, New Yorker, but lots more tuba players. Look it up. 1.2000 0.04126 95 76 19 0
2662 I need a new job. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2663 We're getting off this cruise ship before everyone croaks! 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2664 Drop your wallet on the floor. Or you’ll get both barrels. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2665 Don't dream of shoehorning your way in here" 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2666 I think I’ll exercise the 6 feet rule and wait for the next elevator. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2667 Rather loud way of declaring back-off". 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2668 This is the only way you're allowed to ride the elevator. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2669 We're afraid there will be a run on them. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2670 Sorry,only room for piccolo players 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2671 Social distancing is enforced in here 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2672 By your face, it looks like you were expecting the Full Bar... 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2673 I swear it was the tuba 1.2000 0.05097 95 80 11 4
2674 Boy, does this give a new meaning to elevator music 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2675 We're waiting for John Philip Sousa to conduct us out of this elevator. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2676 It's a new category in the Guinness Book of Records. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2677 Yes, "Mulan" does have tubas. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2678 That's close enough, buster! 1.2000 0.04637 95 80 12 3
2679 Are you coming from the unemployment office? Is the wait long today? 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2680 To be safe we must stay two Sousaphones apart. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2681 TUBAS ONLY! 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2682 We did try the stairs. The tympani were blocking the way. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2683 Come on in, we're tonight's free elevator entertainment. 1.2000 0.05097 95 80 11 4
2684 Three’s a crowd, pal. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2685 It's this or Muzak. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2686 Wamp, womp! going down. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2687 We hope you enjoy elevator music. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2688 No,they're Sousaphones! 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2689 The acoustics are exceptional. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2690 Take one more step and we'll blow you away 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2691 Going up....and a two and three.... 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2692 To be or not tuba. 1.2000 0.05097 95 80 11 4
2693 We hear there's a blowhard convention in the penthouse. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2694 Are we too late? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2695 No, I didn't bother googling what a sousaphone actually looks like, apparently. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2696 We are returning these respirators! 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2697 Sorry sir, our notes are going down, down, down. 1.2000 0.03541 95 79 16 0
2698 We got too winded walking up and down the stairs." 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2699 I don't think that was the tuba, I'll take the next one. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2700 One of Roald Dahl's less successful books: Charlie and the Great Brass Elevator 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2701 Just come in slow, we won't blow 1.2000 0.04126 95 76 19 0
2702 We've found a natural way to enforce social distancing. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2703 I’ll wait for the strings. 1.2000 0.05312 95 81 9 5
2704 Is this too loud for elevator music? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2705 Sorry, this elevator's for the top brass only. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2706 The floor chime is out. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2707 Don’t be silly, there’s room for one more. 1.2000 0.04126 95 76 19 0
2708 Try the string elevator 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2709 There's room for one more in Bob's souzaphone 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2710 Your cardiologist has told you to use the stairwell going forward. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2711 Floor 1? and a 2 and a 1,2,3,4! 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2712 It’s modern take on leper’s ringing a bell 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2713 Sorry guys, pack it up: she said no. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2714 Hop in, I think we're neighbors. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2715 Two tubas apart = appropriate social distancing 1.2000 0.05097 95 80 11 4
2716 Sorry...but the "B" button was for Brass...not for Basement. 1.2000 0.04126 95 76 19 0
2717 The boss needs cheering up. Wanna join? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2718 Sorry, this one is being held for the pit section. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2719 Due to health concerns,the parade's being held privately on the tenth floor this year. You could join us,but it's no more than ten spectators. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2720 Elevator is going down to sub-mergers and aqua-sitions! 1.2000 0.05097 95 80 11 4
2721 Extra extra! The end of the world is coming. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2722 Live muzak - it's the latest, and we even get paid by those who tell us to shut up. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2723 That's right, stay back and wait for the next one" 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2724 I am getting tired of this elevator music 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2725 For most folks we meet, the six foot rule isn't enough. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2726 We're going down to see the top brass. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2727 We’ll be here all week.” 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2728 Sorry, this is a duet only. 1.2000 0.04637 95 78 15 2
2729 I'm afraid we're the new normal for a flash mob. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
2730 You got a problem with elevator music? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2731 We're looking for the bathroom. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
2732 We'll make room, if you can play the trombone. 1.1979 0.04826 96 80 13 3
2733 Yousaphone? 1.1979 0.04593 96 79 15 2
2734 First time at this convention? Head to the fourth floor if you’re horny. 1.1979 0.04826 96 80 13 3
2735 Sorry sir, no more room - we're about to install the giant binoculars up on the observation deck. 1.1979 0.04348 96 78 17 1
2736 Has the parade been on this floor yet? 1.1979 0.04826 96 80 13 3
2737 The kind that you can march with a called a sousaphone. You called it a tuba. That is so embarrassing for you that you probably want to wait for the next elevator. 1.1979 0.04593 96 79 15 2
2738 The acoustics are great. 1.1979 0.04826 96 80 13 3
2739 Don’t worry, we fixed the Muzak. 1.1979 0.04593 96 79 15 2
2740 There's room for a piccolo player. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2741 This is the brass express. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2742 No, I didn't get the promotion dad. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2743 Tuba or not to Tuba? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2744 Did you bring your oboe? 1.1935 0.03825 93 80 11 2
2745 We're replacing Muzak. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2746 Technically they are Sousaphones, not tubas. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2747 The rock concert is in the staff elevator. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2748 Keep your distance, or else! 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2749 Don't try to push my buttons, kid. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2750 This is the tuba lift. The shoulder brief lift is to your right. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2751 Brass on Pocket was the elevator music Stan had always been waiting for. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2752 No entry. This car is tubaed. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2753 This is the Tuba express. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2754 Sorry the elevator music is broken. We're the backup." 1.1935 0.05130 93 79 10 4
2755 We figured wearing these keeps people away at a safe social distance. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2756 It's elevator music, but elevated. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2757 We use elevators, tuba too. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2758 You should see the big brass ones on our CEO. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2759 Next car please. Unless you have a piccolo in your bag. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2760 Ya phony ya! 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2761 Sorry, threeba's a crowd 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2762 It’ll take a pair of BIG BRASS ONES to ride this one! 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2763 We only have room for a flute player. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2764 Sorry sir. This car only services the elevator pit... 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2765 This helps us keep others at least six feet away. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2766 Is the Sousa Room on this floor? 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2767 Got 'em converted to ventilators just in case ! 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2768 They're COVID-testing for lung capacity with tubas. I can sell you mine for $10,000. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2769 Very effective for social distancing, we find. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2770 You know what? I have half a mind to go marching in to Alan's office and demanding that raise 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2771 Elevator to Florida, what's your temp? 1.1935 0.03825 93 76 17 0
2772 Oom ! - it's your Papa ! 1.1935 0.05130 93 79 10 4
2773 Stand back - six feet - take the next elevator - thank you. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2774 Excuse me, which floor is Carnegie Hall? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2775 After the Football Season was cancelled this elevator gig was the only work we could find. Any requests? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2776 It's a new building service. What's your school's song? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2777 Wow man how tubular..... 1.1935 0.05130 93 79 10 4
2778 Wanta hear a tune? 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2779 “Step right in and join our happy band of non-essentials.” 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2780 Don't worry. Ain't nobody coming within 6 feet of us! 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2781 We're the Sousa brothers. Did you phone us? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2782 I’m for Biden. I hate blowhards. 1.1935 0.05353 93 80 8 5
2783 We can go lower. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2784 Sorry, we need to go even lower 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2785 The quiet elevator is next door. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2786 Sorry, making room for you is oompah-sible. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2787 Is this the way to Santa Fe? 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2788 one step foward, and we're going to blow!! 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2789 Playing sousaphone duets in an elevator does have its ups and downs. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2790 We are the angels of social distancing. 1.1935 0.04119 93 75 18 0
2791 And they said we couldn’t go any lower. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2792 Just a couple of low-life's doin' the town. You like Sousa? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2793 With the old system for wake-up calls, some people would fall back to sleep. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2794 The acoustics are much better than in the bathroom. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2795 Our orchestra is playing on different floors in order to comply with the seperation order caused by the Corona Virus! 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2796 Sorry, this elevator is reserved for top brass. 1.1935 0.04119 93 75 18 0
2797 Strings are on the next car. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2798 By chance, might you have seen the St. Stephen's Marching Band come by here a moment ago? 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2799 Accounting? 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2800 No, that's trombones. There's only two of us. 1.1935 0.05130 93 79 10 4
2801 I thought I pushed B! 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2802 The new elevator music was starting to push Tim's buttons 1.1935 0.05130 93 79 10 4
2803 Do you know what floor we can find the percussionists? 1.1935 0.04525 93 79 11 3
2804 Is this the floor for the patent office? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2805 I'd say it has its ups and downs. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2806 It's called 'Elevator Music', google it! 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2807 There wasn't any room left on the subway platform so we set up here. Going up? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2808 Its not your usual Elevator Music 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2809 I thought Muzak went out in the 80’s 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2810 Sorry, we didn't mean to blow this out of proportion. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2811 I needn't remind you to stand back. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2812 Hi. We're the ghosts of the Titanic. Care to join us? 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2813 It was the tuba! 1.1935 0.04119 93 75 18 0
2814 They didn’t have any Marlboro. I said that I’d take anything. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2815 You get one joker and we are all that is left of the band. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2816 I'll wait for the violins. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2817 Why did you have to get the band back together NOW? 1.1935 0.05130 93 79 10 4
2818 We got kicked out of practicing in the rumpus room. 1.1935 0.04119 93 75 18 0
2819 It clearly says, " Weight Limit 1000 lb OR Two Tubas, Whichever Comes First" 1.1935 0.05130 93 79 10 4
2820 You may want to keep a safe distance. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2821 Think of it as our altruistic attempt at social distancing. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2822 Which way to the concert in B Flat? 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2823 Full? I guess I'll take the scales. 1.1935 0.04119 93 75 18 0
2824 The other Tuba player is just awful. ... Shoot, he's standing right behind me, isn't he? 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2825 Going down to F1? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2826 Live Entertainment brought to you by your local elevator. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2827 We hanker to play higher parts. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2828 Are there 110 cornets close ahead? 1.1935 0.05130 93 79 10 4
2829 It's either us or the Muzak. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2830 Is this the HR Department? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2831 Thank god the weekend's here. I couldn't be any hornier. 1.1935 0.04119 93 79 12 2
2832 We've got to go meet the other 74 trombones so we can lead the hit parade. 1.1935 0.04652 93 79 11 3
2833 They trap the virus when we breathe in. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2834 It's all about the bassment. 1.1935 0.04119 93 80 12 1
2835 The elevator speaker broke. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2836 Do you need a flotation device to ride elevators? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2837 Really? Another elevator music joke? 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2838 The muzak is down again.. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2839 Yes, you can come in but we blow at every floor. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2840 There's more room in elevator 4 where he clarinets are practicing. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2841 Let's face it, it beats making small talk. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2842 We're not musicians, we use this as a measure for social distancing. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2843 Did a parade come through here? 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2844 I don't give a toot! Wait for the next one! 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2845 These people taking personal space to a whole new level 1.1935 0.03825 93 80 11 2
2846 I knew I pushed the wrong button. 1.1935 0.04394 93 76 16 1
2847 Please help us, we're stuck. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2848 The Muzak system is broken. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2849 We're the band. Damn right we'll still play on. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2850 But this IS the elevator music! 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2851 If you come on, we’ll lose our social distancing. 1.1935 0.03506 93 78 15 0
2852 Welcome. For your elevator music today, we're the Dueling Tubas. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2853 Is this enough to make you stay 6 feet away? 1.1935 0.04119 93 75 18 0
2854 The sousaphones? They help maintain social distancing. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
2855 Wait for the flute section. 1.1935 0.04652 93 79 11 3
2856 It’s how we keep six-feet from others during the Coronavirus. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2857 Come on, we don't take up that much space!" 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2858 I guess you won’t be needing that wake-up call. 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2859 I’m sorry, the Muzak machine is busted, but we play a really mean version of “The Girl From Ipanema.” 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
2860 Twice the bad elevator music 1.1935 0.03825 93 76 17 0
2861 At least they’re not accordions. 1.1928 0.04985 83 69 12 2
2862 I always forget my keys with these new buttons 1.1915 0.04351 94 79 13 2
2863 We're going up to a higher octave. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2864 So who ordered the tuba club? 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2865 Our tuba fugue should empty the building within ten minutes 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2866 Today we will be playing Stars and Stripes Forever. 1.1889 0.05216 90 77 9 4
2867 you know in England they call it a lift. 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2868 So this is what the hotel meant when they said they have "live elevator music" 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2869 Last car going up for the vertical parade. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2870 Have you seen seventy six trombones leading a big parade? 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2871 Tubas? We prefer 'social distancing' instruments. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2872 Going up or Going down? 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2873 Should the elevator lose sanitation, social distancing devices will drop from the overhead area. 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2874 We're here for a meeting with the top brass. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2875 No, not in the Phil; these are our COVID-19 shields. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2876 Damn Tuba Players Again? No, but if you hum a few bars we’ll probably recognize it and can join in. 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2877 There's room. Just crawl inside either one. 1.1889 0.05216 90 77 9 4
2878 You enjoy the town your way, we'll enjoy it our way! See you later. 1.1889 0.04440 90 76 12 2
2879 Not the tuba-player convention floor? 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2880 The acoustics 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2881 We can play you out. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2882 This is our way of socially distancing. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2883 I don’t see any giant binoculars behind me, or two giant tubas. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2884 Is this the Oom-pah-pah floor? 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2885 Real sports players would take the stairs, but then again they did say marching band wasn't a sport. 1.1889 0.05216 90 77 9 4
2886 Sousa, phone home. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2887 Is this the floor for the social-distancing hall? 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2888 Welcome to the end of boring elevator music! 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2889 What's the matter? You've never seen a 2-ba before? 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2890 Hey dude! We are gonna hit the swimming pool. Would you come? 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2891 Actually we're first and second violin, but the conductor thought that would be the best way to make sure we social-distanciate. 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2892 We enforce social distancing. 1.1889 0.05216 90 77 9 4
2893 Oh-come on in, man. We're just chili-doggin' it in here. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2894 Social distancing is a breeze with these babies. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2895 Our Muzak license expired. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2896 I thought it was seventy-six trombones that led the big parade. 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2897 Due to COVID-19, unemployed New York Philharmonic tuba players making elevator music. 1.1889 0.05216 90 77 9 4
2898 We were kids in the Altoona high school marching band and starred as the big Double O in parades. It's hard to give up the glory. We just live this way. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2899 What song and what floor 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2900 With the suspension of all sports,marching bands have gotten creative,playing fight songs for employees upon entering and leaving the workplace. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2901 We're here to apply for the manual ventilator position. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2902 Is this the Fox News floor already? 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2903 We play requests 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2904 Yes,we understand that, but its kinda an emergency. 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2905 We couldn't find any trombones. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2906 We're here to replace your elevator music. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2907 Sorry, we’re going Oom-pah-pah, Oom-pah-pah... 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2908 Social distancing requires tubas. That’s just how it is. 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2909 Sorry, we're heading UP. Didn't you receive the Tsunami warning? 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2910 The Symphony Hall's closed, so we thought we'd duet in the elevator. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2911 It's Seinfeld's birthday ! C'mon! 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2912 We're here for Sousachella. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2913 No, I don't play, but it seemed the best way to social distance. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2914 It's the new elevator music. Any requests? 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2915 Sorry, we've only got room for a banjo. 1.1889 0.04149 90 73 17 0
2916 Ironically, the tuba players took the stairs. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2917 Due to the CORVID-19 we got laid off, so now we ride the elevator serenading riders. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2918 Tube-a-toothpaste? Close enough...come on in! 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2919 The tape broke. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2920 Welcome to Nadir Investments. We used to be top brass.... 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2921 We have a meeting with the top brass. 1.1889 0.05216 90 77 9 4
2922 Hey, what are these things, do you know? 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2923 2 ba, get it. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2924 Nobody ever wants to get within six feet of us. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
2925 Rehearsal will be over in 5. 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
2926 Party on top, life preserver on the bottom. 1.1868 0.04396 91 75 15 1
2927 Mr. Sousa, I presume! 1.1868 0.04396 91 75 15 1
2928 I'd wait for the next one. (He tooted.) 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2929 You haven't seen 96% of a marching band go by, have you? 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2930 Look, It's not easy finding work these days. You're just gonna have to jump in and face the music." 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2931 It's us or the bagpipers. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2932 We're going to a one—two—three—four! 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2933 The subways are empty, but this elevator is not; la la la corona! 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2934 Sorry, but the string quartet couldn’t make it. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2935 Got a request? 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2936 It's called audio-social distancing. Back up, or we'll blast you with our tubas. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2937 TUBA OR NOT TUBA ! 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2938 C’mon, Climb in, unless you prefer our Passing-Wind Section. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2939 Yes it's been very effective for our social distancing 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2940 Did you hear the one about two guys with Tuba's in the elevator? 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2941 We've been socially distanced our entire career. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2942 Where's the damn 40 yard line?? 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2943 Take the stairs, pal. Unless you're going low. Real low. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2944 It says capacity 1000 lbs, but noone seems to want to join us. 1.1839 0.05305 87 75 8 4
2945 Ready for blast-off. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2946 There’s weren’t anymore weights in the gym. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2947 The acoustics in here are going to blow you away! 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2948 We are looking for the President’s office - we have a feeling he does not understand the concept of brass-neck, however 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2949 I think you should wait to inflate your tuba until after leaving the elevator. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2950 You just never know what you're gonna see on Between Two Ferns... 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2951 Were You the one who said they "hated Elevator Music?" 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
2952 We're taking elevator music to the next level. 1.1839 0.04486 87 74 11 2
2953 Well then how do you think elevator music is made? 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
2954 Yeah, we're looking for the Ark. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2955 Going way down 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2956 We're reinstating elevator music. We're still working on the six-feet-apart thing. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2957 I'm Chip and he's Dale. We've been invited to a birthday party. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2958 There's nothing like playing a tuba in an elevator to really feel alive. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2959 Elevator music is down, but we're standing in for it. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2960 We’re gonna show that opera singer in Turin who’s boss! 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2961 We're here to demonstrate the new Inner Tuba. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2962 I called for a pair of troopers. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2963 Due to the coronavirus, we were asked to replace Muzak. Step aboard and what would you like us to cover for you? 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2964 You forgot the piano. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2965 We're test marketing tuba Muzak. Welcome aboard! 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2966 There’s room but you’re gonna need hearing protection. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2967 just when you think elevator music can't get any worse 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2968 We're here for the sousaphone serenade. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2969 How low can you go? 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2970 The building manager received mixed reviews on the new elevator music service. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2971 Peter was amazed to realize that he was one of the first few to preview the newly designed Life Preservers for the Top Brass of his company 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2972 We’re The Social Distancing Brass Duo. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2973 Sorry! two's company ,three's a crowd 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2974 Seventy-six trombones were between each man With a hundred and ten cornets far behind” 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2975 Squeeze in! I doubt you'll get stuck in here with us. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2976 Do you have a favorite in elevator music? 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
2977 This is the ground floor. Second floor, we play trombones. Top floor, piccolo. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2978 We've had our ups and downs as a band. 1.1839 0.04486 87 79 4 4
2979 With all due respect Steven, you're not scoring a date tonight with your goofy looking satchel. 1.1839 0.04775 87 75 9 3
2980 Welcome to the Hilton's live polka elevator music 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2981 Dammit, I said: 'are you phoning him? 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
2982 Going up? There are 76 trombones on the 11th floor- 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2983 Just be glad we're not part of the wind instruments. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2984 Welcome to gravity defying elevator! 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2985 Our technique to encourage social distancing... 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2986 I'm guessing we're in the wrong place for the audition of "76 Trombones." 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2987 Introducing, 'The Tubular-Two Elevator Music Ensemble 1.1839 0.04178 87 74 12 1
2988 Step back, sir. Social distancing requires that you stand at least 2 miles away from this concert 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2989 This one is headed up to the orchestra pit!! 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2990 No no, these're inflatables for the beach. 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
2991 You're in luck....live elevator music! 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
2992 Sorry, it's called a TWO-ba for a reason. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2993 No. They're not toilet paper rolls. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2994 A little elevator music?" 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2995 We've taken the "not in elevators" pledge. 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
2996 Crescendo 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2997 We're using this as rehearsal space. Best to wait for another car. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2998 We’re trying to take social distancing in elevators to a new level. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2999 You'll love the acoustics. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3000 Don't worry, I play the harmonica. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3001 Looks like you prepared to abandon ship, but not shelter in place. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
3002 Flash mob on the Observation Deck! Tuba players: pioneers in social distancing. 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
3003 In case you plummet to your death sir, we have a great repertoire to keep you interested till you breathe your last. 1.1839 0.05305 87 75 8 4
3004 I know what Cage says, but we each only have the one tuba, and I don’t lend. 1.1839 0.04486 87 74 11 2
3005 And this was a down year, last year’s bonuses were even bigger. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3006 We use these to social distance. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3007 We're trying a new form of elevator music. 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
3008 Down to brass tacks? 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3009 Don't you even think of blowing those instruments in my direction! 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3010 We're part of a proof-of-concept of live elevator music. Management thinks it is a unique business opportunity. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3011 You might want to take the stairs. We are followed by the woodwinds and then percussion. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3012 Making music is a moving experience. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3013 Sir, the aerosol is now more deadly than the repertoire. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
3014 We’re filling in until the Muzak machine is repaired. If you prefer, elevator 2 has an accordion/banjo duet. 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
3015 You're welcome to join us if you're feeling horny. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3016 So, are you two tooting your two tubas again? 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3017 The brass just wanted to let you know, you’re fired! 1.1839 0.05305 87 75 8 4
3018 The usual angels couldn't make it to accompany you up, so She did the best She could on short notice. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3019 You say you ordered two tunas? 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3020 We're looking for 76 trombones 1.1839 0.05305 87 75 8 4
3021 The doorbells aren't working. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3022 Delivery for Mr. Souza. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3023 Jerry? Get it? Funny, right? "Tuba-d"? Like, "Tu-bad"? Jerry?....Jerry? 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
3024 We've got room for a piccolo. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3025 Are you going Oomp or Pah? 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
3026 If the percussionists are coming down next, I'll just ride with you guys. 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
3027 Yes, sousaphones, but also good for social distancing 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3028 Going up? You wouldn't mind holding our sheet music while we practice, would you? 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
3029 We're marching at home. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3030 Wow, elevator music got a little louder 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
3031 Ugh Mondays... 1.1839 0.05305 87 75 8 4
3032 Have you got the brass to get on? 1.1839 0.04178 87 75 10 2
3033 Nah, come on in! We’ve been playing small rooms for a good long while now. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3034 Great skyline,when did the water go down? 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3035 We've got a pitch meeting with the brass upstairs. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3036 There's room for you too, but we will be practicing ... 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3037 This guys not even wearing a mask... 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3038 Sorry you're gonna have to wait. We have our marching orders. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3039 Keeps everyone six feet away. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3040 Going Oomp-ah! 1.1839 0.04486 87 74 11 2
3041 After our subway gigs, get ready to take you to the next level! 1.1839 0.04486 87 74 11 2
3042 It's Tu-for Tuesday. You win! 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3043 It is our new gig. Elevator music for the hearing impaired. 1.1839 0.04178 87 74 12 1
3044 You can get in, but we can't go higher than middle C. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3045 Hop on. You're just in time for our concert. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3046 Stay home, or else! 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3047 After all the layoffs, we thought everyone left would enjoy a pep-rally. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3048 Ear plugs are an option. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3049 We could probably just squeeze you in—we’re headed to the marching band reunion for the class of ‘89. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3050 We're from Carnegie. We don't do subways. 1.1818 0.04725 88 74 12 2
3051 Key change! 1.1818 0.04725 88 74 12 2
3052 Sorry, fella, we’ve got this room rented out for the annual Sousaphone Hall of Fame extravaganza. 1.1818 0.04440 88 73 14 1
3053 May we interest you in an 'uplifting' tuba duet? 1.1818 0.04994 88 75 10 3
3054 We're family members, and this is how we enforce social distancing in the condo building. 1.1818 0.04994 88 75 10 3
3055 It's to encourage working remotely. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3056 No. A drummer is what we need. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3057 Oh god oh fuck oh god 1.1765 0.05339 85 74 7 4
3058 These really help for distancing 1.1765 0.04159 85 70 15 0
3059 We've got to take our office equipment with us. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3060 I’m from Ohio where do I go to dot the I? 1.1765 0.05339 85 74 7 4
3061 What's in the purse? A piccolo? Take the stairs, skippy. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3062 The floor signal chime broke. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3063 Its OK, were playing a cascading scale, easy on the ear drums. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3064 ' Now I wonder, why they call me spectacular' I can see it in the mirror 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3065 We have live elevator music. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3066 Sousa sent us. Where's the 50 yard line? 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3067 (To the tune of Seven Nation Army) “Happy Birthday to you.. you”. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3068 The city is in lockdown. Do any us us a have an ounce of self awareness? 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3069 The only gig we could get since the lock down was elevator Muzak 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3070 The piccolo players are coming up next. There will be plenty of room. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3071 Are you Swiss? We need some yodel distancing. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3072 Do you happen to know Elvira in the key of G? 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3073 Come on, we're getting the band back together! We need your third Sousaphone to get that fat sound back! 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3074 Normally when bands breakup, it's a lot more dramatic. 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3075 First, this one’s full, and second, do you have any requests? 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3076 There is nothing that says the six feet have to be horizontal. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3077 These honkers have every virus of the last 90 years, we're gonna live forever! 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3078 Get in, there's plenty of brass to kill the virus! 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3079 Until this is over,you're here to be eaten,not to eat. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3080 Thanks for coming guys....the Party is taking place in Room 2020 Let 'Er Rip!! 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3081 It was a B flat 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3082 Greetings from Pea Pod Tuba! We're looking for Roger in Apartment 222-B! 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3083 Hi, we're here to make the ride to your floor pass a little quicker. Anything you want to give will be appreciated. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3084 Will you be joining us for the Two Tuba Uber to Tupelo? 1.1765 0.04484 85 73 10 2
3085 I social distanced myself years ago from tubas. Droplets were huge. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3086 Gotta love this portable desk! 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3087 You remind me of binoculars on steroids 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3088 We're got the song down pat. It's about time you brought the lyrics. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3089 *inhales* 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3090 Sorry ... But We're Gonna Blow By Your Floor 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3091 It's a float tube. We're performing Handel's 'Water Music' tonight. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3092 Stay back 6 feet or I'll blow. 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3093 The Wind Section is in elevator 3. 1.1765 0.04159 85 70 15 0
3094 Better not try to horn in on us, mister! 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3095 Sorry, there’s only enough room in here for the tuba of us. I keep telling you these are sousaphones, Ted. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3096 Sorry, but the Muzak is out of order" 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3097 Your personal trainer sent us to follow you and play while you walk. 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3098 Take the next one please. We’re already doing this wrong. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3099 We’re the advance entertainment team for the COVID19 quarantine effort. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3100 Elevator speakers broke again. 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3101 You're in luck. We just started rehearsal. 1.1765 0.04159 85 70 15 0
3102 It's the only way to ensure 6-feet social distancing. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3103 It's called "Elevated Elevator Music." 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3104 Did you get your marching orders? 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3105 Can you help us find Sea Level? 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3106 I hope the 76 trombones are taking the next elevator. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3107 We’re taking elevator music to a whole new level. Hop on! 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3108 Does this car go to the basement? 1.1765 0.04159 85 70 15 0
3109 You will need to pay five dollars in advance if you do not want us to play elevator music. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3110 In case you’re wondering, it was flatulence in G sharp. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3111 only 74 to go! 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3112 Apparently, we are not the top brass they are looking for. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3113 Just enough room for a piccolo. 1.1765 0.04786 85 74 8 3
3114 If you could hum a few bars we'll give it a go. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3115 The floor doesn’t matter; we’re always above you. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3116 Shouldn’t those tubas be wearing masks? 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3117 In this exclusive building we take requests for our elevator music. Do you like polka music? Mike Cowan Sandersville, Ga. 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3118 Uh I’ll take the next one... social distancing. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3119 Why do we have to share the building with the senior symphony? 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3120 We started low, and are not going any higher. 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
3121 The recorded music is broken so it's down to brass tacks. 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
3122 Okay, ‘Sad Sack Sonata’ on three! 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
3123 It's a job we call blow. 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
3124 Could you give us an "A"? 1.1744 0.04116 86 71 15 0
3125 No no, it's a bachelor party. We ordered two nudists. 1.1744 0.05281 86 75 7 4
3126 Yes, but if we wore surgical masks you might risk getting in. 1.1739 0.03973 92 76 16 0
3127 WeTubas were sent by the Gods to infect Heretics for the Trumpocalypse. " 1.1728 0.05209 81 70 8 3
3128 Don't you know how to knock?” 1.1724 0.04961 87 75 9 3
3129 We like the acoustics in here. 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3130 We suggest ear protection if going up more than 1 floor. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3131 We're here to bring elevator music a new meaning. 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3132 You must be staff? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3133 We're the Brian Eno Serenaders. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3134 What are you staring at -- You tweet, we toot. 1.1707 0.05434 82 72 6 4
3135 Now that's a boom box. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3136 Apparently the Muzak station is on the fritz. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3137 Tubs were too large, so we have these. Plus, both of us have Irritable Bowel Syndrome. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3138 So much for social distancing 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3139 There's only room in here if you play the piccolo. 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3140 You should wait for the next one, unless you’re ready to take this ride by the horns. 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3141 The strings are in car two. We’re socially distancing 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3142 How much do you weigh? 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3143 Ten grand, or we will demolish this place. 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3144 Do you happen to know what floor Sousacon is on? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3145 The monaural elevator’s on your right. 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3146 Sorry, brass section only. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3147 Hey, got a piccolo? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3148 Stereo elevator music gone wild 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3149 ALL ABOARD! 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3150 Don’t worry. It’s not as bad as you might think. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3151 It might be a wait. The next elevator cars have the seventy-six trombones in them. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3152 The Muzak is broken. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3153 We are the welcoming committee the brass band convention is on th 3rd floor thanks for bring your music sheets 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3154 No, this is the Tuba-Lift. 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3155 Do you think we made it too obvious for him to duck-out from taking the elevator?! 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3156 Would you like home delivery of "The Washington Post"? 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3157 No. there aren't 76 of us! 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3158 We are preparing for the vacation cruise that leaves tomorrow! 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3159 Harry, you idiot, you forgot It's Tuba Tuesday 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3160 We just want to make sure everyone complies with the rules of social distancing 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3161 We’re the Twobas and we’re here to bring a little joy to your day. 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3162 The reverb in the stairwell’s great, but we kept overblowing. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3163 The one day I forget my headphones. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3164 Ventilator Improvisation Inc. Why do you ask? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3165 Sorry, man- c'mon in and we'll get our brasses outta here. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3166 Welcome to Tubular Hell! 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3167 It keeps people six feet away. 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3168 You havn't seen a couple of kettle drums get off on this floor, have you 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3169 So, neighbor, just where do you think you're going? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3170 Tuba plus tuba equals 6 feet. Any other questions? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3171 Count yourself lucky. The other elevator is vuvuzela city. 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3172 I've been social distancing for nearly 15 years. He joined the band last year. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3173 You down for going up? 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3174 Could be awhile, there are still 76 trombones to go. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3175 Did you order two tuba-grams? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3176 Musical distancing guidelines recommend staying one tuba apart. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3177 This year our bonus is social distancing tubes. 1.1707 0.03804 82 71 10 1
3178 Got room for a flutist? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3179 All visitors must be announced 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3180 Room for a trio 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3181 The front desk said they make exceptions to the one person per elevator rule for people who play the tuba or the banjo. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3182 Sorry, with these bad boys you need to stay sixty feet away. 1.1707 0.03804 82 70 12 0
3183 Oom pah pah, oom pah pah. Welcome to the presidential suite as our first post-virus guest 1.1707 0.04181 82 70 11 1
3184 Maybe wear a mask before getting in here? Just sayin'. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3185 We have a booking for a Melania Trump. Any idea what room that is? 1.1707 0.05434 82 72 6 4
3186 A-M-E-N-I-T-Y 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3187 Wanna hear 'The Flower Duet' like you've never heard it before? 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3188 Contrary to what you might think, we're going up. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3189 Didn't you hear? There's new social distancing rule: all New Yorkers must stay one sousaphone apart. 1.1707 0.04527 82 71 9 2
3190 The only thing more odd would be if one of us were a woman. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3191 We're looking for the joke-starters convention. Did you see which way the rabbi, priest, and duck went? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3192 Et Tuba, Brutus? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3193 Aren't you supposed to be sousa-distancing? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3194 We always had ups and downs in our music career... 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3195 Is this the library? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3196 We're getting off at Carnegie Hall. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3197 We're dropping the bass. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3198 Sorry no requests. We only do uplifting music. 1.1707 0.03804 82 70 12 0
3199 We'd like to know if you can turn these into ventilators? 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3200 We're 'free range' buskers. Going down? 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3201 We perform live muzak 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3202 It's more like elevator orchestra. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3203 I would wait for the next one unless you wanna hear our elevator pitch. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3204 Which one of you is Alexander? " 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3205 Doppler” for two sousaphones and liftman, by Steve Reic 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3206 Gotta call from an intern to help a patient with her tuba-plasty. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3207 Funny you should mention a preference for a root canal. The other elevator to Hell has Dr. Olivier, and tends to get stuck between floors. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3208 The maestro told us to go lower than G 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3209 You should take the stairs, the bass drums are next 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3210 We're going down...to the Underground, I mean the Tuba Station 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3211 Dan, your meeting tardiness doesn't concern us at the moment. Take the next one, thanks. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3212 We’re opening with In a Gadda da Vida 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3213 Is this the funeral home? 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3214 Oops! Wrong Floor! We’re looking for the Sousa Revival! 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3215 There's one way to keep people six feet away. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3216 Sorry, but the recorded elevator music is down for the moment. 1.1707 0.03804 82 69 13 0
3217 Who rang Pest Control? 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3218 We call ourselves the "Cape Horns." 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3219 We've got an antidote for the sousa-virus! No social distancing required! 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3220 I have a bad feeling this isn’t the marching band headquarters 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3221 Blowing Down ? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3222 You must be the guy who ordered the sad tuba. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3223 Sorry pal, we got 37 more trips to go. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3224 You know, like that Death Cab for Cutie song. 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3225 this ship is going down 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3226 Did you ask up or down? 1.1707 0.05434 82 72 6 4
3227 We can fit you on. "I formation," people! 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3228 What? Don't you like elevator music? 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3229 We heard a fat guy fell up here? 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3230 There are many kinds of elevator music. 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3231 The acoustics are really great in here. 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
3232 Sorry, only Sousaphones allowed on this run! 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3233 Relax, we don't know 'Flight of the Bumblebee'. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3234 It's a blast. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3235 Come on, then, plenty of room. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
3236 You guys are way off. Macy's is 2 blocks over and it"s over 6 months until Thanksgiving. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3237 Help! Can you draw a tuba? 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3238 We have some bad news. It's herpes. 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3239 Of course, there's such a thing as live elevator music." 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
3240 A one, a two, a one, two, thre..” “I actually need to go to the basement 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
3241 Where did you get those indoor bath tub floaties? 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
3242 Elevator music ain’t what it used to be. 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
3243 By the time we get to the ground floor, I bet you can tell which is the loudest. 1.1687 0.05091 83 72 8 3
3244 If you said Sousaphone, come aboard! 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
3245 We’re here to deliver our um-pa-pa solo 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
3246 I suggest you try to squeeze in now. The organ is coming on the next one.” 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
3247 It’s a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll. 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
3248 Extreme Tuba? 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
3249 Grab the next one. Piccolo players. 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
3250 Looks like you caught us being horny in the elevator 1.1687 0.05372 83 73 6 4
3251 That's not sufficient social distancing 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
3252 ''We should have known it was a tuna sandwich they ordered.'' 1.1687 0.04135 83 69 14 0
3253 Phone Suzy 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
3254 Ya, I suppose that one of us might toot in the elevator. 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
3255 Hello sir, please stay 6 feet apart. An elevator is not an exception. 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
3256 Going down, very low. 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
3257 After switched from Samsung to the Sousaphone we realized how much we missed the analog keypad 1.1687 0.05091 83 72 8 3
3258 Playing has it’s up’s and down’s. 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
3259 Go up? Hardly ever. 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
3260 You’ve got a lot of brass, hogging the elevator! 1.1687 0.05091 83 72 8 3
3261 I know you’re asking yourself “Tuba or not Tuba?” 1.1687 0.05091 83 72 8 3
3262 Going down as low as possible. 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
3263 Ya wanna blow you horn? Next elevator. 1.1667 0.04427 84 71 12 1
3264 We're trying to bring everyone's anxiety down a few octaves. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3265 Testing for coronavirus, take the other elevator please. 1.1648 0.04492 91 78 11 2
3266 This elevator won't take you to the top. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3267 Is the tuba concert on this floor? 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3268 This completes our set of the Ramones songbook. 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
3269 Maybe if you played clarinet. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3270 Horatio, please join us! 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3271 There wasn't 6 feet in the elevator for us to social distance. 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3272 We usually practice on the roof garden unless its raining. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3273 Which way to the band? 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3274 We hope you brought your dancing shoes! 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3275 Sorry, Social Distancing Guidelines Extended Through End of April. You can’t get in! 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3276 These help enforce social distancing. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3277 There are supposed to be twelve of us. The other ten were coming up the fire stairs when the lead horn fell flat. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3278 It does double as a flotation device. Why do you ask? 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3279 We are on our way to hitting some high notes 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3280 Stay over there, and we'll play for you. After that go home and watch the game on you laptop. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3281 This is what they mean by "Stereo Where Available" 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3282 Our time on the cruise ship has left us quite attached to these buoys... 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3283 Tuba où? 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3284 No, this is not the elevator to the sensory deprivation tank. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3285 Ever since Muzak went belly-up, we've been volunteering to provide the mood music. 1.1646 0.05532 79 70 5 4
3286 It's the only way we know how to hit those high notes. 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3287 Make up your mind, in or out, because I'm about to start tooting my horn! 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3288 Sorry, we're going down. 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3289 You a tuba man? 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3290 For the crisis the streets are empty, so the street musicians took their serenading to elevators. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3291 Oh, don't worry there's still space. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3292 If you prefer light jazz, wait for the other one. 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
3293 A dubstep DJ is in the other elevator. Your choice. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3294 I would catch the next one, unless you have ear plugs. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3295 Do you play the clarinet? 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3296 Going downpahpah? 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3297 Going up?" "No." "Well that's tu-bad. 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
3298 Sousaphone! And yes, we're going down. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3299 There’s plenty of room, march on in. 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3300 Could be worse. Could be a banjo player. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3301 ... It's called "maintaining a six foot radius in close quarters with elegance," son. Why else would we be wearing suits AND inner tubes??? 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3302 It's a cumbersome but musical reminder to social distance. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3303 You ought’a get one. Best social distancing thing ever. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3304 Masks the sound but not the smell. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3305 We love the acoustics. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3306 Actually we were hoping for a percussionist. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3307 I must have forgotten to take my pills. 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3308 You social distance your way, we'll do it ours. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3309 We're rigged to blow sanitizer. Care for a spray? 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3310 Sorry,we don't take requests. We only play elevator music. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3311 So who’s going to get off to maintain social distancing 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3312 Oh--No! Don't cough and blow! 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3313 So you’re the Jim getting fired, not promoted? 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3314 Are you the bellboy? 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3315 Plenty of room! 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3316 We can't TOOT them. They're just for social distancing! 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3317 I hope this takes us to a different decade. 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
3318 The condo upgraded the elevator music, but now there is no room for the residents. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3319 Sorry, but wearing a mask is only a recommendation. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3320 It’s the new elevator etiquette: use a sousaphone for safe social distancing. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3321 We’re from the Campaign for Real Elevator Music. Care to sign our petition? 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3322 It's called Bass Tuba Concerto in F Minor. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3323 We decided to break up the band. 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
3324 We shall carry you to your glory while playing a wondrous sound. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3325 Melvin didn't get the "toot your own horn day" memo. 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
3326 Unless you’re into Tuba EDM, I wouldn’t get on. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3327 This elevator's speaker is out of order. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
3328 Back off or be trumpled! 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
3329 Sorry we can only take you to the bass ment level. 1.1625 0.04853 80 69 9 2
3330 The party on the tenth floor is over. 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
3331 This floor have the Muzak offices? 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
3332 Do you have ear protectors? 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
3333 Are you going treble or base? 1.1625 0.04853 80 69 9 2
3334 Which one of you is Baritone Barry? 1.1625 0.04853 80 69 9 2
3335 The six foot rule does not apply to musical instruments 1.1625 0.05169 80 70 7 3
3336 Going crescendo? 1.1625 0.04853 80 69 9 2
3337 Auditioning for 'Schindler's Lift', why? 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
3338 Welcome to the new live music experience here at Macy's elevators. We are the Tuba Divers, any request? 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
3339 Live elevator music? Well fuck me and slap my ass this is a great fucking surprise. 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
3340 Again,from the top! 1.1625 0.04151 80 69 10 1
3341 foo~bar~ 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
3342 Too ba d. Sorry. 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
3343 Excuse me, but do you know if this is the right floor for the Oom-Pah band tryouts? 1.1625 0.04151 80 67 13 0
3344 No, sorry, we’re going down. 1.1605 0.04797 81 70 9 2
3345 The Schmengees!! 1.1591 0.04241 88 75 12 1
3346 Better take the stairs. We're part of the Noah's Ark Symphony and we're taking it two by two. 1.1585 0.04743 82 71 9 2
3347 How I see people now. 1.1585 0.04414 82 70 11 1
3348 Up? Down? Does it really matter? 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3349 No sousaphone, no service. 1.1566 0.04014 83 70 13 0
3350 Care for some live elevator music? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3351 If you wait for the next one, you can probably squeeze in with the accordions. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3352 We heard there's a fat man walking on this floor 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3353 We’re headed to the basement. 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
3354 Life Saver Band rooftop show. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3355 It is not what it looks like. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3356 Sorry, our new music system requires a lot of bandwidth. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3357 Twobas are better than one. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3358 How's our tempo? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3359 Going up the scale? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3360 So this is not the Tuba Concerto in F Minor Convention? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3361 You were expecting harps? Boy have I got some bad news. 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
3362 You're back... 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3363 "Where is this political rally room? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3364 We’re with Noom. Advanced. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3365 Going upbeat? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3366 If it's like anything else, this will scare the crap out of it. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3367 Perhaps you should wait for the accordion car. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3368 Uh, oh, you know the rules, and now you two are going to be in so much trouble. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3369 And let me introduce you to the musical dryer duo. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3370 . . . this the penthouse restaurant floor? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3371 Is this the Pit? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3372 Cuomo has large brass instruments occupying elevators now to prevent crowding. what floor? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3373 We should've taken a left turn at the 50 yard line 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3374 You're late for practice. Come in and close the door so we can get started. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3375 Just stay an arm and a half away, Next floor! 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3376 Gotta horn? 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3377 It's a bit cliché but we're the elevator music on your ride up today. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3378 In an elevator, you're always supposed to face front. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3379 Sound system broke down. We are Plan B! 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3380 No, sousaphone. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3381 We are going down 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3382 We heard the free food was on floor 20. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3383 Oom-Pah-Oom-Pah-Oom-Pah-Pah is better than muzak. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3384 To be or not to be, that is the question. 1.1558 0.04553 77 68 7 2
3385 For our next selection, we will play "Going Down" by Freddy King. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3386 We're looking for the Amex Marching Band. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3387 If you hurry you can beat the drum line to the stairs. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3388 There were complaints that the Muzak was putting people to sleep. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3389 I hope you've got a flute in there. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3390 Sorry pal. Tuba'd for you. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3391 We had seven of us--we're the last two 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3392 Six feet back, please. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3393 Did you happen to notice 76 trombones come out of the other elevator or are we on the wrong floor? 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3394 You may want to wait for the next elevator. It’s for the piccolo player. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3395 One false move and I will literally blow your head off. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3396 Climbing the walls bored. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3397 Welcome to the neighborhood. We are here to pipe you aboard! 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3398 This elevator is for the bassment only. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3399 Brought your earplugs? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3400 To tuba or not to tuba 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3401 Lub-a-dub-dub. Two tubas did flub. How do you get to the club!! 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3402 The speaker is out... 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3403 Is this the floor for the Sousa wedding? 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
3404 You better go ahead and get on. The didgeridoo players are coming down next. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3405 Going up or down the scale? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3406 Save yourself! We’ve been caught by a giant Minion! 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3407 You will not will not need your wand tonight 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3408 Back in business and safe to ride. New emergency button is on backorder so we volunteered to fill in for a few days. What floor, please? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3409 Tubs or duo tuba? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3410 You can't tuba in a shower. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3411 Please take another elevator. We’re holding for seventy-four more. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3412 We took to doing live elevator music after getting our marching orders from that parade gig. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3413 I’ll wait. Two too many tubas. 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
3414 A tubaulous encounter 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3415 There's not much room but plenty of oompah. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3416 No room. Tuba-d. 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
3417 Music Department, fifth floor 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3418 Why no, we didn't get the directive about Souza distancing! 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3419 No, we're not so horny. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3420 Don't get any closer. We're the oom-pah-pah corona virus elevator band. 1.1558 0.04161 77 67 9 1
3421 Just rehearsing. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3422 Three's a crowd," yeah, that was ours 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3423 Our tubas double as body condoms. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3424 Just one blast ensures immediate social distancing. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3425 Come in. The acoustics are great ! Any requests ? 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3426 Welcome aboard - the Muzak went out but we've got you covered! 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3427 Where's the rest of the brass section? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3428 That sinking feeling emerges from your nightmares 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3429 The band’s all here 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3430 Let the horns sound out Let the button fail Let the doors pale Shout out the doubt 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3431 Social distancing is a good idea, too. I said take the next elevator because I just farted. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3432 I told you already... They’re not tubas, they’re time machines! 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
3433 Christ! What a brass hole! 1.1558 0.05566 77 69 4 4
3434 We're going up but you can get down. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3435 Would you like to squeeze in, or wait for the bagpipes?" Phil Walker, Fallston, M 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3436 If you climb up, there is more room to stand and less noise! 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3437 Find another venue, the acoustics in here are terrible! 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3438 Sir, I assure you the concierge didn't hear "twins, Sue and Joan". 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3439 I know you think you hate elevator music, but this time will be different. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3440 I know the sign says the elevator has a capacity of twelve, but we're not all flutists." 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3441 OK, I see the Sousa part, but where's the phone? - Carl Yaffe, Rockville, Maryland 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3442 forget something? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3443 You want to go to the penthouse? Sorry, this is low brass only." 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3444 Oompah down? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3445 Muzak went bankrupt so they hired us instead 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3446 ah yes you have finally come to fight me tuba brothers. I have been waiting, after you took my family from me I have prepared for you. 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
3447 Do you know where the tuba´s convention is? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3448 The Muzak is out of order." 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3449 Looks like you never saw a four-ba before ! 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3450 Which floor for the Noise Abatement Society Meeting? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3451 Didn’t know you could play a bafoon! 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3452 Thankfully, everyone wants to stay at least six feet away from a couple of tuba players. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3453 HONK! HONK! 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3454 Is this Carnegie Hall? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3455 Yes, we are taking requests. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3456 You’re not getting on without your protective tuba! 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3457 The tuba is in your satchel, ok. But what's with the jacket? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3458 We're practicing social distancing in extraordinarily elevated situations. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3459 Didn’t you hear? It’s bring your tuba to work day!”. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3460 We're trying out some new elevator music. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3461 We needed some help hitting the high notes. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3462 Going up--and flat. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3463 Just wait - the flautists are next. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3464 If music be the food of love, play on. ( from Twelfth Night by Shakespeare ) 1.1558 0.04161 77 68 9 0
3465 Can we practice Sound Distancing 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3466 Apparently, they claim they said "We meed a Tuba. Soon!" 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3467 You ready for your sanitizer, man? 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3468 We were tired of the same old elevator music. 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
3469 We figure that if we keep blowing on these things, we can't get the virus. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3470 Are you the piccolo player that's joining us? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3471 We're from the Parahorns Society. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3472 Our neighbors told us someone on this floor had a special request for this one. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3473 Mom said we could do anything EXCEPT ‘play on the tube.’ So, naturally, we play on two. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3474 How far away is your Sousaphone? I can only hold it a minute. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3475 We're from the Muzak Rebellion Ensemble. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3476 Sorry, one and five only. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3477 You going up or down? 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3478 This elevator goes straight to Hell. 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
3479 I’d let you in but he just broke wind. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3480 Waiting for an elevator at the Ohio State marching band dot-the-i reunion. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3481 Social distancing, man. You forgot your mask AND your tuba. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3482 Sorry fruitcake, we don’t do Vivaldi. How bout some nice Sousa? 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3483 When the Saints come marching in 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3484 We're going to 8, but we can let you off at 4. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3485 We are a vertical band just be patient 1.1558 0.05566 77 69 4 4
3486 Crap! Why did I just get my new hearing aid fitted today?! 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3487 What? You were expecting Mike Pence? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3488 Sorry, the man purse conversation is in the hotel next door! 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3489 We're going down and we're staying down 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3490 Five to one baby one in five No one here gets out alive 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3491 Use only one tube of universal transport media per person. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3492 Who tooted? 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3493 Elevator music on a whole 'nother level . 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3494 Oh, I guess P is for parking level, not pit.... 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3495 Careful! Don't slip on the wet spittle. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3496 TP is gone on 3 So we grabbed the Tubas. Heard there is an obo left on 4. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3497 Of course his elevators play Oompa. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3498 We're rehearsing Muzak. 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3499 We hope you enjoy the live elivator music. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
3500 We're going to the third floor only, after that it is too high. 1.1558 0.05566 77 69 4 4
3501 If you must know, we both tooted in the elevator 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
3502 nan 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
3503 We are here to blast away the virus with our tubas! So step aside so we can let her rip! 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
3504 We heard you were hiring horny interns. 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
3505 Going "Blop"? 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
3506 This elevator is going down. We must self isolate in the basement along with the bassists. BASSment TOObas going down. 1.1538 0.04855 78 68 8 2
3507 Oh, what? Forgot yours baton? 1.1538 0.04855 78 68 8 2
3508 Tuba two, to you, too! 1.1538 0.04855 78 68 8 2
3509 Since they canceled all the parades we have to practice in here! 1.1538 0.04112 78 66 12 0
3510 Haven't you heard? The CDC now recommends tubas for coronavirus protection. 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
3511 It's how you make elevator music more instagrammable. 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
3512 There's room for one horn. 1.1538 0.04112 78 66 12 0
3513 We're always going down, but we'll send you a note when we get there. 1.1538 0.04112 78 66 12 0
3514 Sousaphone gang gonna fuck shit up. 1.1519 0.04797 79 69 8 2
3515 I'll bet the office pool is on seven,isn't it? 1.1519 0.04064 79 67 12 0
3516 You might need those floats, heavy stuff goes on here. 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
3517 You guys look way too horny I will wake for the next one 1.1519 0.04797 79 69 8 2
3518 99th floor going down? 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
3519 We’re the band for the Sousa wedding. 1.1512 0.03885 86 73 13 0
3520 I forgot to bring a tube a toothpaste. 1.1500 0.04394 80 69 10 1
3521 Whoa hey there, you can come in the elevator but tubey careful. Our tubas will blow you 6 feet away. 1.1500 0.04017 80 68 12 0
3522 Stand far enough away that RoBob can't see you! 1.1500 0.04394 80 69 10 1
3523 Sure the last guy didn't like our pitch much, but I'm sure you will! 1.1500 0.04017 80 68 12 0
3524 Do you know of a band staying on the upper levels? 1.1500 0.04017 80 68 12 0
3525 No thanks, I prefer my eardrums intact. I'll get the next one. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3526 We fear it's now ill-advised to come marching in.... 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3527 We're DJ's. He's Social and I'm Distance. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3528 We are remodeling 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3529 They kicked us out from the bass floor. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3530 The elevator music is broken. Hope you like brass music. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3531 We're muzakians. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3532 One of our customers wanted some loud noises that would disturb other people because they didn't have in their TSA reports on time 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3533 Better get in, the drum section is in the next car. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3534 Sorry. The quartet had to split up when the freight elevator went down. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3535 Ventilator Brass 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
3536 The building is getting new phone service...Sousa-phone service, that is! 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3537 THIS elevator music will not be boring! 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
3538 It takes the guess work out of social distancing. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3539 We're going down to B. 1.1486 0.04164 74 65 8 1
3540 Me and Burt here, have always had a big hate on for muzak. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3541 What is the question? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3542 are you apartment 329? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3543 Tuba or not two tubas, that is the question. 1.1486 0.04164 74 65 8 1
3544 Room for a harmonicas. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3545 Of course it's legit, kid. How else would we get to that last seventh? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3546 Safe cheer. No really, micro filters inside. 1.1486 0.03692 74 65 9 0
3547 Catastrophe pay isn’t gonna pay for my tuba lessons 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3548 Don't worry — we're only going down one octave, er, floor. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3549 Sorry, but it’s all due to The Tremendous Burn Some Fat Act” 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3550 What? You never heard of elevator music? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3551 Six feet away or I'll play E flat. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3552 We hope you enjoy the loud and obnoxious elevator music. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3553 Well you see, the hotel lost its contract with the Musak people and we were the best they could get on short notice. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3554 The other 74 are coming up the stairs. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3555 We had to let the trombonist go. Somehow we never got to the next floor. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3556 Tuba of us is plenty! Wait for the next one... 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3557 We're taking up the whole elevator...so Sousa me! 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3558 Stay 6 feet away from us, or you'll be seeing the inside of this tuba! 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3559 DA, DA, Da,Da, Da, Da, Da, Da, Da, Da DUM DUM, We're going Down 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3560 Sorry, the conductor said we're not allowed to stray from B. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3561 This one won’t let you down. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3562 Take the next one. We're moving the USS Massachusetts up to the 12th floor. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3563 Hope you don't mind our elevator music. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3564 These bitches love Sousa 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3565 Today, we're featuring John Philip Sousa. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3566 This was not the live concert that i've order yesterday 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3567 You can get on with us or wait for the trombones. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3568 We're crescendoing. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3569 The Muzak machine is down. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3570 Hi, we're here to spice up your elevator music. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3571 Where's Dr. Dooley's office? We're here to get our tubas tied. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3572 This is the base clef lift. Treble clef is to your right. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3573 It's our way of social distancing: no tuba, no elevator! 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3574 They wanted to upgrade typical elevator music. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3575 Don't come to close we have the hornovirus! 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
3576 Yes, I understand there is no room for you, but hotel management insists on live elevator music. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3577 I’ll wait for the next two tubas. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3578 Elevator Music: Live! 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3579 Sorry, you missed the roof-top tuba concert in honor of the health heroes. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3580 Grim Reaper pivots. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3581 Trump decided he needed some classier elevator music 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3582 Sousaphone! Sousaphone! 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3583 C'mon in, the weather's fine! 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3584 Sorry sir, it’s a 2 drink minimum now. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3585 Welcome, come in and join the party! 1.1486 0.04164 74 65 8 1
3586 Williams! Come in here and listen to this for a minute. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3587 You know, this would be a great excuse for you not to get into the elevator. Crazy. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3588 We are just trying to help people out with their social distancing efforts. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3589 Don't even think about horning in 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3590 Hail, hail the gang's all here! 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3591 I’m not into brass to mouth, so I’ll take the stairs. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3592 You wouldn't happen to play the viola, would you? 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
3593 No, no, do come in. We'll blow real soft" 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3594 Is this the floor for horny guys? 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3595 Where’s the Parade? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3596 There is not enough room for practicing social distancing! 1.1486 0.04164 74 65 8 1
3597 There wasn't room for the 76 trombones. 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
3598 We're your new neighbors, hope you like music. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3599 The other 74 trombones are waiting in the lobby for the next elevator 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3600 You apparently didn't get the memo. We're moving forward with the OomPahPahjulator. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3601 You guys do know that they have ear buds, right? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3602 "The safe distance from a tuba is a least 24 feet and you still have to listen to the sound whether you want to or not." 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3603 You must be playing elevator music 1.1486 0.03692 74 66 7 1
3604 I’m not Larry David. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3605 Are you the guy who made the noise critique? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3606 Hurry, we are late for having our tubas tied. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3607 Inflatable tuba in that skinny thing? Prove it! 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3608 What's the chance you play tuba? 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3609 We only have room for a triangle player. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3610 We can only seem to go to floors one and five. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3611 You want aerosolized, we've got aerosolized. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3612 Can’t believe they cancelled our gig again, this blows. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3613 These are really great for enforcing social distancing, except when there happens to be two of us. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3614 What’s better than live elevator music? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3615 Congrats! Survived another Monday 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3616 We're trying to brass this joint up. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3617 We decided the elevator music was too boring. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3618 We're standing in for the broken elevator music. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3619 They're sousaphones not tubas! 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3620 Oops. Sorry, what floor is the tuba convention? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3621 Well, how else do you enforce physical distancing? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3622 Name your tune! 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3623 We also fart non-stop. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3624 What floor is the pool on? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3625 We're headed to Bourbon Street. Want to join us? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3626 There wasn't enough room, so the piccolo players had to take the stairs. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3627 On cloudy days we power the rides with wind instead of solar 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
3628 We're here to give some oomph to the economy. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3629 We are sorry...we didn’t know you weren’t wearing a mask. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3630 The tubas keep is six feet apart. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3631 The red ink tidal wave is coming" 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3632 Thought we'd spice up the elevator music a bit 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3633 Oom-Pah-Pah . . Oom-Pah-Pah . . Yadda Yadda Yadda 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3634 Be thankful your instrument doesn't require you to book a double-bed room. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3635 Stay there, we’ll march on out!” Kyle Kenyon Bonita Springs, F 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3636 Don't try to horn in. We're Sousal distancing. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3637 Are you going "tuba" ground floor? 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3638 STORM ALERT: "Cet on if you can swim." 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3639 Can you play "Oom-my-Pah-Pah" the way Eddie Fisher sings it? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3640 Next stop: Radio City Hall 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3641 oh boy they're really lacking breathing machines out there... 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3642 The early attempt at elevator music never really got off the ground. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3643 Sorry, we can only fit a flutist. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3644 Social distancing must not be new to you two 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3645 We were hoping for a flutist so we can start a trio. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3646 Sorry, we don’t take requests. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3647 This looked like a lot more fun in “La La Land.” 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3648 So, which [wind] instrument do YOU play? Harmonica? or that thing known as ...the mouth? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3649 I don't think I can squeeze in with the company's brass. I'll take the next one. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3650 Don't stare. Traveling musicians look different these days. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3651 We provide the elevator music for this building. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3652 Get in. The next car is trombones. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3653 WFH too? Could you keep it down a bit, we're trying to rehearse. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3654 Room for a clarinet" 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3655 And if you play the tuba too, I win the bet! 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3656 Get in quick - the banjo ensemble’s just letting out. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3657 Guess which one is a tuba or a personal flotation device? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3658 Well, Francis, maybe I would believe you more often if you didn't constantly have your head up your brass! 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3659 Can you push 14? Neither of us can reach it. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3660 Unfortunately we don't have a license for 4'33" so we have to play something. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3661 You like elevator music?! 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3662 Macy’s parade? 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
3663 We have room in our band for maybe an oboe or a clarinet. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3664 Are you sure? There's plenty of room. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3665 We miss the drums too,but we have to ride separately due to an abundance of percussion 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3666 Come on Greg, we're getting the band back together! 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3667 Is there an operating theater that's open to visitors around here? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
3668 Is the Tubaist Anonymous meeting on this floor?" 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
3669 “Sorry, we are looking for a heavier man to follow around.” 1.1429 0.05135 77 69 5 3
3670 You won’t believe what’s on the top floor. 1.1408 0.05033 71 63 6 2
3671 Going starboard? 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3672 Keep your distance buddy. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3673 Tuba? We pushed 2B 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3674 We’re members of the social distance symphony. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3675 Hmm.. Steve did say he worked swingshift. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3676 It's the only way we can reach the high notes 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3677 'Step away or I play.' 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3678 Our streaming service is down 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3679 Tell someone we can't keep isolating in this elevator. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3680 I'm not going down like that. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3681 Bass-ment express 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3682 If bullshit were music, he'd be a brass band. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3683 Son, we are your oom pah pahs. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3684 Thinking about taking the this car? Just remember, Two-Ba's don't make it right. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3685 No more blowhards needed. 1.1408 0.05033 71 63 6 2
3686 What were you expecting? 1.1408 0.05033 71 63 6 2
3687 Yea yea yea, we’ve heard it all before. “Where are the 76 trombones?” 1.1408 0.05033 71 63 6 2
3688 this is the end of the world as we know it 1.1408 0.05033 71 63 6 2
3689 Invitation said B.Y.O.T. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3690 The base section is one elevator over. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3691 If you were waiting for the bass to drop, I think she's on a different floor. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3692 It doesn't seem like those Tubas are social distancing at the moment 1.1408 0.05033 71 63 6 2
3693 Going up to get down to the brass tacks. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3694 Is there room for me, I only have a piccolo. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3695 Our music is better appreciated if you are going down. 1.1408 0.05033 71 63 6 2
3696 Are you ready for some heavy metal? 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3697 Don’t worry. We’re great at elevate’er music. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3698 Once we strike up the band, we'll get 6 feet apart. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3699 Now they're taking this elevator music thing wayyy too far! 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3700 Do you know any Sousa marches? 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3701 Were going down to the bass-ment of course. We can’t reach the higher floors. 1.1408 0.04158 71 63 7 1
3702 Elevator music is too calm for us. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3703 If you think that was good, you ought to hear the tune we did for the hold button people? 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3704 Loud enough to drive away all the blues. . . 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3705 I'd wear a mask if I were you.. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3706 We can't stand the elevator music, so we drown it out. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3707 As an extrovert I struggle with it. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3708 It's a new weight-loss program. Probably the best I've ever seen, wouldn't you say, Fred? 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3709 We're part of an organization called "Boom". 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3710 No worries their on mute. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3711 The sousaphones help us practice social distancing. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3712 And now, in living stereo 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3713 What? You think you can get to the top without blowing your own horn? 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3714 No, the top brass is on fourteen. 1.1408 0.03642 71 62 9 0
3715 Montovani and Mancini try tubas. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3716 We tried every way possible to observe social distancing - but we failed. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3717 The worst nightmare-to be quarantined in the brass section. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3718 Somehow we got separated from the rest of the marching band—but come on aboard if you’re a sousaphone lover. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
3719 Two tubas in an elevator. Sounds crazy, no? 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3720 The elevator Tuba loop. . . we're practicing. 1.1408 0.04158 71 61 10 0
3721 Sorry this elevator only goes down. 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
3722 Two buck tuba. 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
3723 Are you the one who called for an essential tuba party? 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
3724 We like you!!!!!! 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3725 Oops, wrong floor. Good day to you sir! 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3726 It’s polka to the top then we cover John Cougar Mellencamp coming down. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3727 Alexa , I said Smooth Jazz not Tube Jazz 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3728 The conductor told us to raise out pitch a couple of levels. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3729 I'd love to join you, but alas, social distancing... 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3730 We’re going up, but our notes will be going way down. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3731 We tipped the Super ten bucks and he told us we could open our spit-valves over the janitor’s slop sink on this floor. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3732 {the person inside the lift says to outsiders} Come on ! Haven’t you heard of social distancing 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3733 It looks like the elevator music is improving. 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3734 There's room, and the acoustics are unbelievable! 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3735 Are you the conductor? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3736 Well that's one way to keep me on track for my New Year's Resolution... guess I'll take the stairs. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3737 Piccolos are coming down next. Grab that one. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3738 We've been hired to promote social distancing. 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3739 C’mon in, Tubby. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3740 It's not a tuba! No Semper Fidelis for you. Tacet! 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3741 Can’t you guys play something, besides the theme song to Titanic? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3742 There’s room if you want. the bagpipes are next... 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3743 I am looking forward to my eggs sunny side up this morning. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3744 Airbag 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3745 'I represent HornGuys.com, and we are here to reinvent elevator music for the 21st century." 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3746 Mr. Souza? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3747 Helps us maintain social distancing , listen closely you do not want to hear anymore " 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3748 Would you like some help with your luggage? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3749 Can you hear us when the doors closed? It’s plenty loud in here. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3750 Going to the "bass"ment. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3751 It’s your lucky day! 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3752 We're too old to march so we just elevate. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3753 Is this where we get off for swimming pool? 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3754 Down. Lobby, parking, and bassline. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3755 They actually have people who play the elevator music? Yeah, you might know us from being on hold with your cable company. 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3756 Got there too late. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3757 Is this the sousasectomy surgery section? 1.1324 0.04140 68 61 6 1
3758 Elevator pitch perfect 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3759 Aren't you forgetting something? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3760 This brings tuba duets to greater heights. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3761 While going up, we get to play higher notes. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3762 The social distancing tuba......... “Sorry, but there is no room in here for you.” 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3763 We blast it with some Souza and the doctors step in and finish it off. 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3764 Speaker's down for maintenance. Any requests? 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3765 All aboard for the sweet tuba serenade ! 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3766 Welcome to Muzak Live! 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3767 Sorry - this is a tuba quarantine. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3768 76 trombones next floor 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3769 Going an octave up or and octave down? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3770 Tu ba, or not tu ba. We play up and we play down. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3771 6 feet's not going to play in elevators 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3772 We got tired of Stairway to Heaven. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3773 We're going to the "bass"-ment. Get it...? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3774 Happy Birthday to you...Happy Birthday to you...Happy B— 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3775 The elevator music is down. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3776 Have you seen a guy in a tux holding a baton on this floor? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3777 Go ahead. I'll wait for the next movement. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3778 We are trying to elevate appreciation for Tuba music. One, two, three and four..Hit it Simon 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3779 We've lost our parade but the acoustics are amazing. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3780 we're supposed to meet Mozart here 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3781 We took care of the awkward silence. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3782 It's a socially distant orchestra and this is Recording Studio 3. Please use the stairs. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3783 Our last rider was hauled off to Bellevue. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3784 We tried. It doesn’t go any lower. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3785 No, they're not tubas, they're sousaphones. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3786 The Swim Lord is shaking hand down on deck two. 1.1324 0.03571 68 60 8 0
3787 If you were ever thinking about taking the stairs to get in some extra cardio… 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3788 Please! Stay away! 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3789 The percussion section is in the next car. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3790 Right, we are the 'Tuba Twins'. He's Gooding and I'm Junior. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3791 Sorry, this car is reserved for patients who need a tubavator. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3792 We're headed to the executive suite for an event - I 'd guess you aren't? 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3793 Beware of the aerosol-we are here to remind you to wear a mask before entering 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3794 Sorry Mac! The space is covered 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3795 Just watch, this’ll keep ‘em six feet off. 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3796 Mind your distance. We could blow at any moment. 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3797 Herbert had A-minor accident, can you direct us to the nearest bathroom?" The Fernandez-Medina Family, State College, P 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3798 We have nowhere to go but down. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3799 Sorry. Not enough bandwidth! 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3800 Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday to you. "We're all in our places with sunshiney faces. Happy Birthday to you. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3801 Is this the floor for the party? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3802 May I suggest the quiet car to your right? 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3803 In this new luxury condo, they have live elevator music for the hard-of-hearing. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3804 You shouldn’t have. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3805 Tired of your criticism of elevator music. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3806 One foot closer and I'll blow my tuba! 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3807 Two Toots To Two! 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3808 With overcrowding from Covid 19 God has resorted to a talent contest. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3809 Where's the Tuba Convention? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3810 You better catch the next car...76 trombones coming next. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3811 Top floor. CEO Suite. The boss said he wanted us to suck up to the brass. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3812 Strap in...for Muzak live! 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3813 What did you expect from us - elevator music? 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3814 We’re just a couple horny guys Going up in the world 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3815 It’s your Bass-ic elevator music. 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3816 No room here. CDC says only two tubas to a car. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3817 A lot of acoustic problems in this little studio. 1.1324 0.03571 68 60 8 0
3818 We'd like to play the Overture of "Gypsy" for you! 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3819 COVID-19 Marching Band coming through! Tubas keep us six feet apart. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3820 Got room for a piccolo? 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3821 I told that music store I wasn't changing my mind. A piano in my den was my first choice. Darn that store paparazzi! And on my job too! 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3822 That guy was a real blow hard 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3823 That will never be me! 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3824 Sorry but our ensemble is full. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3825 We’ve got a spot for a tympanist. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3826 social witnessing 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3827 We each had the same thought about social distancing. Now we're inseparable. 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
3828 No, we're going down. The piccolos are in the other car. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3829 You might want to take the next elevator 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3830 Sure, we take requests—unless they’re unkind. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3831 I guess that’s why the crescendo felt so real. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3832 Oh, us we’re just practicing social distancing 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3833 We play for tips--you choose the song. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3834 Ooops...thought this was the floor for the John Phillip Souza Convention. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3835 Tired of the 'old elevator' music . . . come in and experience ours. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3836 Come on in and tuba on down. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3837 Maybe we don't understand elevator music. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
3838 We got laid off from Broadway. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3839 If you can think of a better way to enforce social distancing, I'm all ears. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3840 Look out—the boss is giving marching orders. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
3841 Grab a life preserver Mark, boss says we're up to our neck in it this time. 1.1304 0.04576 69 61 7 1
3842 Basement no. Bass. Definitely 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3843 Well, we just got sick of the same old elevator music, so... 1.1304 0.04576 69 61 7 1
3844 This elevator lift is reserved and restricted to the paying participants and registered attendees of the 'Twin Tuba Players Conference and Convention.' 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3845 The new normal? I'll just grab the next one. 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3846 How to make sound escalate. 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3847 Wait a second, this is not the Opera House! We clearly blew it... 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3848 Management sent us. Where are the open-plan offices? 1.1304 0.05020 69 62 5 2
3849 Uplifting— or something just about you? 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3850 Travelling musicians 1.1304 0.04576 69 61 7 1
3851 They couldn't afford Muzak. 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3852 If you had to listen to the same bad jazz every time you forgot something in your car, you'd learn an instrument too. 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3853 Take one step. I dare you. I double dare you. 1.1304 0.04576 69 61 7 1
3854 76 trombones still need to come down. 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3855 We're both braggards 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3856 Not again! “P” is for “parking”, not the “pit”! 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3857 What are you looking at? Given the current situation, I would rather be wearing a lifesaver than a crossover! 1.1304 0.04576 69 61 7 1
3858 We are the post-Covid-19 guest speakers! 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
3859 We're taking the tuba duo to the next level. 1.1286 0.04514 70 62 7 1
3860 We were told the pool party was on this floor. The big guy in back already has his goggles on. 1.1286 0.04030 70 61 9 0
3861 Sir, can you direct us to the Shark Tank? 1.1286 0.04514 70 62 7 1
3862 It’s a new reality show called ‘Brass is Blind.’ 1.1286 0.04514 70 62 7 1
3863 Hi neighbor! There was something I'd wanted to tell you about this evening... 1.1286 0.04952 70 63 5 2
3864 Did you say 'too bad' or 'tuba-d'? 1.1286 0.04514 70 62 7 1
3865 Love in an elevator, living it up when tubaing down! 1.1286 0.04514 70 62 7 1
3866 We are here to announce the arrival of our master, Jabba the Hut! 1.1286 0.04952 70 63 5 2
3867 SURPRISE, SURPRISE,SURPRISE!!! 1.1282 0.04224 78 69 8 1
3868 Try a whole step up! 1.1250 0.04518 88 80 5 3
3869 The tenants voted to get rid of Muzak. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3870 Stay home.. STAY HOME.. Bum Bum BUMMM 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3871 Hi, sorry, we’re trying out new ideas for elevator music, try the next car, this may take a while. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3872 Welcome to Mardi Gras. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3873 Gentlemen, I cancelled online a week ago? 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
3874 Do you do droplets? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3875 The muzak is broken. Going down? 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3876 Elevator-Sousaphone-Duo-concert.com. How may floors will you be going? What is your request? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3877 I'm patient zero. Take one step and you're dead. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3878 Wait for the next car or horn in here if you want. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3879 We're just trying to stay afloat. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3880 You shouldn’t be going out without a tuba. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3881 Forgot your horn at home again? 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3882 We Don't Want Contaminated Federal Check. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3883 They’re not giant rolls of toilet paper. They’re tubas, I swear. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3884 Is that a tambourine in your shoulder bag, or are you just happy to see us? 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3885 You may want to wait for the next one. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3886 You have to toot your tuba in order to board this elevator. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3887 They’re Coronas! Take another elevator. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3888 Two Up Band Annex 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3889 Well, Mr. Art Critic, I'm in front of him so, yes, my sousaphone should be in front of his too. Smarty-pants. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3890 You won't get a car for a while. It's an orchestra loft now. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3891 I think there are tuba many of us in here already. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3892 Tubas! Tubas going UuuuppP! 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3893 What are you, the Uber? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3894 Stay six feet back or I'll let 'er rip. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3895 We only go down. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3896 Hey man, us and our giant robot friend who somehow fit in this elevator are going to the water park. Wanna come? 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
3897 Sorry young fella this is the NO COOTIES ELEVATOR. Shirt, shoes and life preserver IS required. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3898 You'll need to put on your jacket before joining us upstairs for the meeting with top brass. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3899 You guys sure can blow the doors off! 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3900 What floor is French horns? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3901 Grab your tube at the pool before they're all gone! 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3902 It's the elevator music you need - coffee shop's closed. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3903 Are you ready to "get down? 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
3904 Unless you're a Sousa fan, you might want to catch the next elevator. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3905 We're still rehearsing. The concert's tomorrow. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3906 Did the lockdown over yet? We're isolated in here since Gary's birthday last week. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3907 We’re only using our instruments for social distancing only. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3908 I think we played the wrong number 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3909 I'm teaching how to hit the high notes. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3910 He's hiding in his room. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3911 They said they're prepared to float us a loan. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3912 Again, we can never get out of the bass-ment. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3913 Our venue was cancelled. We will gladly take your request and accompany to your floor 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3914 Everyone was complaining about the elevator music so we thought we'd spice things up a bit. Any requests? 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3915 Could you please help us? We need a judge for our duel. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3916 Listen to the sound of whole nother elevator 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3917 Play to ride 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3918 We're having trouble carrying a tune. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3919 The penthouse?! Awesome! Tonight we’re playing death metal. 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
3920 2 months of social distancing and all I did was eat! Hello Tubby the Tuba! If I get on there with you guys the elevator is liable to crash just like the Stock Market! No thanks, NEXT! 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3921 We find it helps with social distancing. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3922 We kind of eyeballed the conversions for weight capacity, so maybe don't get on. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3923 We have a Sousa-gram for a Carol Stevens. Does she work on this floor? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3924 The lifesavers are keeping them six feet apart while also helping them stay afloat on Trumps level so they don 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
3925 Yes, the virus does go farther through the air when blown through these. You should have paid your debts. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3926 Gentlemen, that‘s way less than six feet. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3927 Where are these Mad Men's going? I wish I could go with them. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3928 Musicians? No. It's in case we're trapped. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3929 Siamese twins Elbert and Perry continue their research on the use of the Tuba to promote social distancing. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3930 They say this place has the best acoustics. Welcome to our show. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3931 Sorry, the acoustics are just so much better in here. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3932 I'd like to thank everyone for coming out and supporting the real elevator music scene. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3933 We've found it works great to enforce social distancing in tight quarters. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3934 you must play with a small instrument 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3935 Social distancing is for old people only! Get in here. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3936 Well,I guess I 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3937 Going Down Of Course 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3938 We are a living breathing ad for the benefits of social distancing . 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3939 You say this is the floor for the 'tuber' conference! 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3940 No, kazoo players take the other elevator. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3941 I said Bass Men, not basement! 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3942 The muzak is out, so we’re improvising 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3943 Our way of social distancing has always been easy 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3944 We're here to get your attention these days! 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3945 Are you the one that ordered Tubagram? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3946 No coffee delivery? No problem. We’ll wake you up. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3947 Please come in, if you mind us rehearsing 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3948 Quick, call those World Record people! 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3949 Any requests? Gooooinnn" doooown! 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3950 Can you believe that management furloughed the elevator music band? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3951 Sorry. We were looking for a bassoon or a French horn. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3952 Eric is in the house 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
3953 What floor is tubas? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3954 ''That is not how social distancing works'' 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3955 Hum it. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3956 And now for something more uplifting--- 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3957 I can't believe we were able to steal these life tubes from the band 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3958 The marriage counselor said it would work 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3959 This one is full 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3960 Have you seen our piccoloist? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3961 Trombones are in the next car. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3962 No, we're going down. To the lower register. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3963 I thought if people thought I played the tuba people'd stay six feet away, but I wasn't counting on seeing another one 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3964 Our music will blow you away." 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3965 Tubas to two too 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3966 Yes, this on the up and up, step in and enjoy the ride down. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3967 Looking for Lucifer's Barbecue Bash. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3968 It isn't a Tuba technically it is a sousaphone. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3969 Social distancing—no one but another tuba player comes anywhere near us. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3970 Are you going flat or sharp? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3971 It works better when you're a fat guy. 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
3972 It’s our way of social distancing. No one wants to get in an elevator with a pair of tuba players. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3973 Sorry. This is the express to Tubacon. 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
3974 Have you ever tried to tune one of these things? Almost impossible. As a last resort, if they’re flat we go up. If they are sharp we go down. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3975 Your rental is the bonus package 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3976 Sorry, we only have room for two-bas. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3977 Hell is other people, but also those people are playing tubas in an elevator. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3978 Sorry; the muzak is broken. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3979 Step up! We’re here to super vibrate COVID-19 away - nothing else worked!! 1.1231 0.04107 65 59 5 1
3980 The elevator bell was broken. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3981 Sorry we’re signed up till 12. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3982 If we see you in these parts of town again, your ass is brass." "Yeah, you tell 'im Larry!" "If you don't like it, well that's tubad." "Keep 'em coming Larry, yeah! 1.1231 0.05593 65 60 2 3
3983 We are the marching band that will accompany you to the hospital. The marching music will make you happy and you will forget you have corona virus. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3984 Music is helping against claustrophobia. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3985 Haven't you read the new CDC guidelines? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3986 You can’t complain if you can’t figure out which floor we’re on. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3987 What can you brag about? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3988 Guess I finally have time to catch up on all those old copies of the New Yorker! 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3989 Is it ok we’re not 6 feet apart? 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3990 You can buy tuber spacer for social distancing on line now . 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
3991 There's room for one more blowhard in here! 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3992 Put the mask and the gloves, or we play all the way up 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3993 At least the 76 trombones took the stairs. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3994 We are here to celebrate the 20th reunion. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3995 There's no room for your fat brass. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3996 I DON'T SEE WHY NOT, THERE'S PLENTY OF ROOM!! 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3997 The base drum is stuck between 3 and 4 . 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
3998 Hotel busker business? Well, you know... up and down. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
3999 Thanks. But I'll wait for the Muzak elevator. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
4000 Good morning sir, we've got a pitch that's going to blow you away. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
4001 We're here to dot the I in double Script Ohio...How do we find the Ohio Stadium 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
4002 It’s the latest version of the Trumpet for our marching band. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
4003 The famous double bass euphonium duet leaves for their performance at the Lincoln Center. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
4004 We are legally allowed to do this, I've checked! 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
4005 This elevator is for the big brass only 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
4006 This one time at band camp... 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
4007 Come any closer and I'll play 3 rounds of Dvorak's 9th Symphony! 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
4008 The tubas help with social distancing. -Alex Holtzman, Queens, New York 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
4009 The work order says you wanted two tubas, not two tubs. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
4010 The orchestra’s in the one to your right! 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
4011 The Muzak is out, so we thought we'd entertain you. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
4012 I’m so sorry but this elevator stops only on floors 1 and 5. 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
4013 Sorry, but we’re conjoined. 1.1231 0.05146 65 59 4 2
4014 If you're not a huge Sousa fan,I suggest waiting for the next. 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
4015 the floor bell is broken today, so they hired us 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
4016 Your ex-wife paid us to help with your hangover. 1.1207 0.04967 58 52 5 1
4017 Come on in, but don't be surprised if you hear a toot. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4018 There's only room for a French horn. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4019 Look at how slim this fellow’s chest is, Gregory! Why, I doubt he could play even four bars of one of our bwomp bwamp songs. ‘Tis a true shame some men weren’t built to play the ‘ba. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4020 Without us, the elevator only goes down to the G. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4021 Tuba-ad for you! 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4022 We need to consult with the top-level brass. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4023 I don't know why they fired us, all they told me was "we want elevator music" 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4024 Sorry, this elevator never goes up. 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4025 Going down...to the Bass-ment. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4026 It's the only way to hit those high notes. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4027 Yer darned tootin' we're going up. You try to hit the high notes on a sousaphone. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4028 Excuse me, but do you know what floor the YouTuba convention convention is on? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4029 Don't worry. These each is covered with an N95 filter mask. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4030 Don’t make us dot the 'i' on you. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4031 I'll wait for the next elevator. Not much a fan of the Fourba. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4032 Have you seen a brass band? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4033 The piccolo forgets it is the dress rehearsal! Typical! 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4034 Twoba, or not tuba--that is your question. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4035 Be Ready! Biblical flood safety devices on sale now. Get yours before they are all gone! 1.1129 0.02417 62 57 5 0
4036 Come join us for our live elevator music performance—from the lobby all the way up to the 90th floor! 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4037 You've got a lot of brass to hog the elevator like that! 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4038 Tu-bah or not Tu-bah? Sorry, only blowhards allowed. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4039 No, we wouldn't need them if people took social distancing seriously. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4040 What are you doing in the office? Only necessary personnel can remain... and from that messenger bag I can tell you aren't necessary 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4041 You can't run from the brass. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4042 You mind? We take requests. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4043 Step on while we oompah to the roof-ah 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4044 If you’re hoping to make Vice President this year, ditch the man purse. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4045 Do you mind if we practice on the way to our floor? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4046 We came up with the idea of anti-social distancing separately, but then we just hit it off. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4047 At least we're not carrying purses. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4048 I have no idea what to say as a caption either, so we are playing tuba instead. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4049 Two tubas on an elevator can be up-lifting experience. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4050 This is our newest method to monitor crowds and social distancing 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4051 That's not six feet apart... 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4052 Geez. I thought they were kidding about that “spare tire” thing. It’s diet time. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4053 This device protects politicians against floods, fires, and all bacteria and has a with built-in broadcaster linked to Fox News. It comes with a lifetimes supply of toilet paper, too. I'm off to show it to President now. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4054 This is no time for a parade 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4055 Since the pandemic started Harold has noticed that people give him even more than the suggested 6 feet. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4056 Now, that's what I call elevator music! 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4057 Finally! We found an audience! 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4058 This is the oom pah express to the 27th floor. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4059 Space limit is twobas. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4060 Formal abandon ship with YouTubes. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4061 Is that an N95 mask? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4062 JW Pepper, I presume. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4063 Requests? What do we look like, trombonists? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4064 Take one step and we will blow you up! 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4065 This is the "Fright" elevator. The "Freight" one is next door. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4066 We're sorry you cancelled your cruise, so we're bringing the Covid cruise experience to you! First- air-transmission tuba playing! 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4067 Are you Bazooka Joe? We are here to wish you Happy Birthday! 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4068 Sorry, no room....these are social distancing tools. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4069 C'mon in! We're having a blast. We promise not to toot in close quarters. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4070 Sorry, we've only got room for a piccolo. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4071 Umpa, Umpa, up or down? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4072 Coronavirus daily practice 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4073 Is this the floor where the mice were found? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4074 Happen to play cornet? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4075 Sorry, too-ba full. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4076 Sure... just say it... "Because we play the tuba" isn't sufficient consideration for social distancing. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4077 Have you heard the good news about our lord and savior John Philip Sousa? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4078 Wait, how much weight did I gain in quarantine? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4079 Another blowhard will not make it a trio 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4080 Tuba you don't have room for another tuba in there...ya know what I mean? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4081 They told is not to push the buttons but this is going too far... 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4082 Is that a tuba on your pocket or are you just glad to see me? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4083 Its distancing in elevators. They are calling it Tubad. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4084 I'll will pay you 2x what my wife is paying to stop following me around and tell her I worked out today. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4085 You'll be waiting a while. The rest of the marching band is behind us. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4086 We've been furloughed by the Philharmonic. Who needs elevator music when you can be serenaded by De Jong's "Music for Two Tubas?" 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4087 We're hoping by live-streaming Muzak it will go viral! 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4088 It’s the best way of covering up a fart. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4089 You're just in time for a little piece we call post-modern chamber music. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4090 Do these sousaphones make us look fat? Be honest. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4091 I thought we all agreed that we were leaving our tubas in the room. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4092 We're filling in while the elevator music is out. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4093 We're accepting donations to take your elevator pitch to the next level. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4094 Bernard and James took note of the new social distancing rules. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4095 Don't mind us, we are here to drown out the farts. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4096 It's about social distancing 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4097 We ditched our germ-covered smartphones for sousaphones. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4098 You may want to take the stairs. The string section is rehearsing in the other. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4099 Our Muzak system is currently down. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4100 Yes, we find this an excellent way to practice SOCIAL DISTANCING. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4101 Going down to the Bass register? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4102 Only if you have earplugs! 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4103 We’re the COVID-19 building evacuation alarm team. Still workshopping social distancing. Wanna get in? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4104 It's so much easier to wash this way. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4105 They're sousaphones, you first-floor idiot! 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4106 We thought we could make more room if we took our shoes off. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4107 So this is not Carnegie Hall? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4108 Which floor are the big brass on? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4109 Erie to jus to out or go 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4110 The CDC sent us here to annoy people into going home. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4111 We’ve been hired by management to help keep the residents from feeling isolated. Any requests? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4112 Try it, motherfucker. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4113 If you get on, we will start playing. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4114 Yes, we're going up...isn't that right Snyder? Up, up, up to the tippy top! 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4115 You need one of these to see if we can fit you in or not. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4116 These tubas keep us socially distant 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4117 The other 74 are still upstairs. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4118 "Your flat or A sharp?" 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4119 I don't think it'll count as social distancing if you get in too. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4120 Tuba's company, three's social distancing. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4121 We're gonna take marching tuba to a whole new level. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4122 Didn't you hear? It's "Toot Your Own Horn Day." 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4123 Headed to the bass-ment, hub? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4124 Thank you but I´m not into trios 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4125 Don't worry, we're hiring. Rooftop gigs only. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4126 IN THIS BUILDING, WE TAKE ELEVATOR MUSIC VERY SERIOUSLY. 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4127 We're here to audition for the Sousa cover band. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4128 Coronet virus unavailable. Deal with it. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4129 I'm sorry about the smell, but that last one was the tuba, I swear. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4130 But elevator music is supposed to be quiet and calming... 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4131 The president will be right down when we finish 'Hail To The Chief. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4132 It's called a two-ba. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4133 It can only go up from here. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4134 We're going oomp-up-up 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4135 Tubad there's not room for you 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4136 I should warn you that I'm going to toot in here. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4137 And a one.. two, or a one, two, three? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4138 When I wore a jacket over the trumpet someone called me fat 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4139 We only march on flat ground. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4140 No, we're not plumbers. These are Sousaphones. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4141 There are 76 of us but we are socially distancing. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4142 we've got 74 more waiting in the lobby 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4143 We’’re Tom and Ted from the Traveling Tuba band filling in till they fix the sound system on the elevators. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4144 Aerosmith wanted a horn section 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4145 They don't bite. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4146 Sorry. It's a little crowded in here with my brother's big butt. 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4147 Elevator music guaranteed to keep the coronavirus away 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4148 Is the orchestra pit on this floor? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4149 Oh sorry, we got too low. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4150 Sorry, this elevator is for tuba, not threeba. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4151 And a one... And a two... And a three... And a four... And a... 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4152 We still have room for a violinist! 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4153 Well, you’re in luck, we know a tuba duet that’s perfect for a ride to the 23rd floor! 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4154 A bag might not be enough to keep social distance, a tuba is much better. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4155 You’ve heard if the Three Tenors, well we’re the Two Tubas 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4156 Oops. Didn’t get memo about social distancing and spirt valves? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4157 now we need to find the second ME 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4158 We aren’t super-spreaders! 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4159 Going so far down it’s comic? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4160 Hold yourself at a major interval. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4161 Sorry sir. For triple horns we use a bigger elevator. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4162 What floor are the lifeboats on? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4163 Everything is cancelled! We were sent back because there is no wedding. Love caught the virus. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4164 We outbid Musak. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4165 What? You were expecting elevator music? 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4166 We can't go too high. 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4167 This really helps with social distancing in multiple ways. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4168 You can't come in without your Covid distance separator. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4169 Free speech delivery at your place 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4170 Did seventy-six trombones get off at this floor? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4171 Life is like an elevator, sometimes you have to let people off. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4172 Sorry, there's no standing up space, but you're welcome to crawl in the horn... 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4173 I mean we're technically floating" 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4174 The rest of our marching band is social distancing in A, B, D & E flat. Can you help us find a key for our 2BR with 2BA? 1.1129 0.03336 62 56 6 0
4175 Come on in we are heading to the bassment. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4176 We seem to have lost our way. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4177 Sorry, this elevator only serves the low levels. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4178 Wanna join the building's Tuba Team? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4179 Okay so here's the elevator pitch, we're two guys who love playing tuba but we also....dance. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4180 What? You don't like live elevator music?" Patrick Thompson, Georgetown, S 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4181 This is not the Waldorf Astoria that I was looking for? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4182 THE CHIME WAS CONSIDERED NON-ESSENTIAL 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4183 We thought this would be the best way to get to the high notes on the tuba! 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4184 We’re here to see your boss, Mr. Nova. 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4185 You think that's a low note? Come hear it in the basement. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
4186 Sorry man no more room. Tuba bad, Sousa sad". "Larry we talked about this.... 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4187 Why are you looking at me with those huge eyes? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4188 1. your boss said you needed reminding about your tardiness . 2. we know it is a pool party but if push came to shove , safety first , right ? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4189 The strings have plenty of room. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4190 It may be a while. Our full orchestra is doing a rooftop concert tonight. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4191 I'll wait for the percussion elevator. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4192 It's going to be a while. The rest of the band is still on 16. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4193 Sorry guys, the band rehearsal is on the Fourth Floor 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4194 I don’t think you’ll fit, we've already filled all the silence. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4195 We’re here to play for your social distancing award dinner! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4196 Trust me, being a one man band was a lot easier. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4197 It was supposed to be a trio! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4198 It may not look like it, but this is how we practice social distancing. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4199 It helps with social distancing in a couple of ways. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4200 I'm sorry, but there's no room for a trio. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4201 A little more oomph in the oom pah pah 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4202 We're a step up from Musak. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4203 How’s about some oompah music?” Don Dechman, Austin,T 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4204 Sorry sir, speakers went out, just elevator noise today. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4205 The acoustics in here is fantastic! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4206 There are 74 more coming. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4207 I’m ok, I’ll catch the next one...” 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4208 We're about to drop the bass. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4209 We’ve taken social distancing to a new level. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4210 Sure it has its ups and down, but I get to do what I love, man. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4211 If you flatulate, it could cause us serious windpipe damage. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4212 Going ooh-pah-pah? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4213 It’s us or Muzak. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4214 Is this how social distancing is supposed to feel all the time? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4215 We are! We're staying six beats apart. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4216 Going Oompa? Sorry ... couldn't resist ... we tuba players are crazy funny. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4217 We’ve been told to play lower 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4218 The conductor said he’d be right back. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4219 We were hired to play the Coronavirus Victory Parade. Are we early? 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4220 How's the Riding-Band training going, Fred? 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4221 Sorry! We make sure no one leaves the building. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4222 You'll have to take the next one. We're waiting for the horn section. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4223 We're heading out to join Hickman's all-tuba parade through the neighborhood! Spiritual uplift and social distance, at the same time! 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4224 Just wait till you hear our elevator music. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4225 Can you play the tuba? 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4226 The barbershop quartet couldn't make it. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4227 OK BUDDY..that’s close enough⁉️ Any closer and I’ll let you have it I’m not carrying this around for nothing ⁉️⁉️⁉️ 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4228 We heard these worked in the battle against tuba-rculosis, maybe we give it a go! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4229 There's room if you're a flutist. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4230 Forget it, buddy. The one after us has all the string basses. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4231 You think your surprise? We been on 24/7 and this elevator hasn't break and fallen ever since. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4232 We've had no problem with social distancing, but the self-isolation has been painful. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4233 With these no one will come 6 feet of us 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4234 Flight of the Bumble Bee" ain't happening, pal. Something with less buzz 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4235 Are you down,down,d-down,down? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4236 We now have live elevator music. Hop in. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4237 The bathroom was kinda of flooded 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4238 Mind if we practice on the way down? 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4239 It was out of service for that long, uh? 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4240 Bottoms up! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4241 We're here to see the top brass. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4242 It's not like I'm going to empty the spit valve right here. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4243 We're serenading at each floor. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4244 The Muzak System is on the fritz.Elevator B is featuring the Darnell triplets on their accordions. If you prefer. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4245 6 feet! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4246 We have room for one flautist, are you a flautist? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4247 Where are the oom-pah tryouts? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4248 Plenty of room. Just horn your way in. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4249 We're part of the TUBAVID Quarantine-tet, you might want to keep back at least 6 feet. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4250 We're the top-floor brass. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4251 Door#1: Totally Tubular! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4252 Come on it! We're going tuba-ing. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4253 Is it a brass band or an orchestra? I need to know if I should take the stairs. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4254 If this situation inspires you something funny, you’re in. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4255 Take the one on your right for woodwinds. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4256 Sir, it's two tubas on the second floor, just wait until you hear the ten trumpets on the tenth! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4257 Marriage has really changed you, Mike. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4258 What, you say? Use the stairs? You've got to be kidding-the acoustics are terrible in there! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4259 You're thinking about social distancing right this minute, I bet. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4260 Fuck social distancing. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4261 Do you have any tuba sanitizer? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4262 Have you seen 76 trombones go by? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4263 I'm sorry, but there is no more six feet left in here! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4264 Quit trying to impress the self absorbed little shits. One day they’ll realize life can’t be reduced to an app, and the environment is going to swallow them whole, no matter how many memes they post. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4265 It just makes social distancing easier. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4266 You can request a theme of"Children of Sanchez" while up way to your floor. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4267 We don’t give two hoots about you but if we did you’d know it. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4268 We're taking requests for elevator music. 1.1017 0.03147 59 54 5 0
4269 You’re welcome to join us, but I’m afraid there’s only enough space for a picolo player. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4270 It's guerilla marketing for new TubaToothpaste. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4271 You better not have a tuba hidden in that bag, because we're already exceeding the weight limit. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4272 You like Sousa? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4273 No, I can't make the sad trombone sound. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4274 Oom papa mau mau? 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4275 We're sorry. There wasn't room for 76 trombonists. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4276 We were called a month ago for a party,is it a good moment? 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4277 Well they said the floods were everywhere. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4278 You’re in luck! We’ve got room for a flute! 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4279 Get in, loser. We're going shopping. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4280 We're providing elevator music IRL. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4281 Management is experimenting with personalized elevator music. You seem like a sol-do kind of guy. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4282 We have been receiving complaints about the elevator music being too boring. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4283 I don't suppose you've seen a few dozen trombones. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4284 It’s going to be a long day at the office. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4285 I told you no one would want yo be within six feet of us! 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4286 gonna need to wait for the next one, unless— unless you wanna help us fuck these tubas? 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4287 John we said sousaphone, not messenger bag! 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4288 Welcome to the John Philip Sousa lift 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4289 Is this the floor for the "Tuba Boy Band?" 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4290 aaAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaUUUUUUUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuUUUUUUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuuuuuuuugggggggggggggggggggHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGhhhhhhhhhhh tuba men 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4291 Going oom-pup-up 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4292 What a coincidence! There's only enough room for a person WITHOUT a tuba. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4293 We R encouraging shelter at home 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4294 Nothing like the tuba to boost morale, am I right guys?...They’re sousaphones, not that it matters, you’ve been fired, Dick. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4295 It'll be a noisy ride. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4296 Our special of the day is Croc au vin. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4297 The woodwinds are in a separate car... 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4298 We prefer the term Muzak. 1.1017 0.05238 59 55 2 2
4299 Sorry, bud, only two tubas at a time per elevator during social distancing. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4300 Sorry, this one doesn't go any lower. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4301 The Big Brass called us in. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4302 We’re looking for the floor with 76 trombones. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4303 Catchy but not Catching! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4304 We're with Trump Tubas. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4305 You'll know you're far enough when you can't hear us anymore. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4306 Post-pandemic ,Tubby-the-Tuba workout on two. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4307 Oops, this is not the brass section 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4308 WHAAT? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4309 Is this the floor with 76 trombones? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4310 The woodwinds are in the other elevator. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4311 Crowded? Certainly. Convenient though, after that large breakfast. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4312 We outbid Muzak. C'mon, you'll love us. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4313 Wait for the elevator to our right if you prefer the '80s style muzak. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4314 If you don't care for the sound of big brass, you can take the other elevator where they're featuring a combo that plays music you might find more uplifting. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4315 A "strings fellow" should catch another elevator. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4316 Looks like you missed the social distancing training. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4317 Floor please? It helps us choose our next selection." 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4318 What did you expect, Mozart. "This is the basement. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4319 That's the new frontier of chamber music! 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4320 We're on a crescendo, you want the next elevator! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4321 Sorry, you’re not in our shelter in place group and this is the only place we can rehearse! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4322 Due to budget cuts, we’re the new elevator music. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4323 We’re looking for a “7” 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4324 It’s not that kind of social distancing, guys. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4325 Toot? I'd call that silent but deadly" 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4326 Are the new ventilators everyone’s talking about?” 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4327 Everyone does social distancing their own way 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4328 Sousa wanna go up, do ya? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4329 Take the next one. The tenant in 10F is REALLY horn-y. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4330 Lose the shoulder bag, turn around, exhale, and back your ass in here. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4331 I think we can squeeze one more in. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4332 As you can see, we're not fluting around in here. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4333 Sorry pal, take the other elevator. The flute section's in that one. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4334 We’re getting off here to practice tuba and social distancing 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4335 Our hotel proudly provides you a little light elevator music for your traveling pressure! 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4336 Don't worry, we don't normally play above elevator pitch! 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
4337 Perfect timing! We're just about to start practice. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4338 Going down? To the bassment? 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4339 "Don't mean to blow you off sir, but going up we practice and this crate rocks." 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
4340 We’re sorry, Me Albright, but keeping our social distance with our tubas in the elevator precludes our taking you to your 11th floor office. The stairs are to the right. 1.0921 0.03829 76 70 5 1
4341 Did you ever see the movie 'Animal House'" 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4342 The Muzak isn't working. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4343 No problem- we are on the 10th floor too. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4344 You must be our harmonica accompanist! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4345 it's a sousaphone you trom-boner. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4346 This building's elevator music is a bit dramatic. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4347 We're elevating the Muzak. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4348 We think it´s better to go down gracefully 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4349 Tubas? You believe this putz? Sir, these are Sousaphones. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4350 Sorry, we have the Titanic virus. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4351 No signal for cell phones, but Sousaphones work just fine. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4352 Going down to the bass clef? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4353 Twin turbos"? -No the brochures clearly say " enjoy our twin tuba elevator service" 1.0893 0.05270 56 53 1 2
4354 Come in. We’re safe. Coronavirus hates loud brass. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4355 If we cannot listen to 76 Then two will do 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4356 We made the oboes take the stairs. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4357 Going up? We have an appointment with the top brass. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4358 Of course, we're going down. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4359 Take the stairs. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4360 Sorry. Every ride ends on a low note with us. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4361 WeWork thought live elevator music might be what was missing 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4362 Sousaphones? No, these things were drawn by someone that never played wind instruments. Our guess is the artist smokes weed and bowls. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4363 That reminds me, I still need to get toilet paper! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4364 We are the tubas. Is this the second floor? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4365 These ALMOST look enough like Sousaphones to be scary! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4366 C’mon in, we’re having a blast! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4367 We're old white guys here to spread the Coronavirus 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4368 No, this is the brass section. The strings are in the service elevator. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4369 You mean you DON'T have one of these? Larry, keep up with the times. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4370 Tuba, toilet, what's the difference. We're all going down the crapper. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4371 We're done being proud of you. You have to start blowing your own trumpet. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4372 March!!! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4373 Hop on, we're waiting for the banjo player. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4374 Congrats! No virus! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4375 They're great to use to enforce social distancing. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4376 Sorry, we don’t use male cheerleaders on this elevator. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4377 Try the next elevator, unless you wanna crowd in on these toots. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4378 Come on in. We promise not to blow your head off. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4379 Get back in your apartment or we blow. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4380 C'mon in! The acoustics in here are great! 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4381 It's OK , we both tested negative 1.0893 0.05270 56 53 1 2
4382 You'll need to check your bag. The rules regarding carry-on luggage have changed. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4383 Our third member didn’t make it! |aiq.127051|aiq.124912|en.wir.a|en.wiraf.a|en.tny.c 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4384 The elevator bell isn't working. We're filling in. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4385 The spa package includes a tuba. Your penthouse suite has a tuba of its own. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4386 New rule. You can't enter without a social-distance tuba. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4387 You forgot your tuba. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4388 Is this the floor where the big brass are meeting?" 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4389 Remember when this building was a walk-up? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4390 We got this so only two can use the elevator. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4391 We're on our way to the bassment 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4392 They are very effective for social distancing. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4393 Muzak broke so we're helping out. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4394 The rest of the orchestra is downstairs, but they're coming. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4395 You’ll have to wait for the next car; our tuba spacing is exactly six-feet. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4396 Even when you’re right, you're wrong. Daily Commute 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4397 We’re recording elevator music. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4398 Sorry buddy, but we can't seem to get to 13. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4399 There's only room for a glockenspiel 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4400 We're making sure everyone stays a healthy 20 feet away! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4401 No work today! Let's celebrate! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4402 We've been social distancing for years! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4403 No tie - James Taylor! 5,6,7,8 ... 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4404 They wouldn't come off after the after the after-party. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4405 Have you seen 74 other trombones? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4406 Sorry, Premium Class renters only. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4407 The building manager was kind enough to give us work playing elevator music since the orchestra had to close down. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4408 Going down...with the ship. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4409 Is this Muster Station 12? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4410 Just another normal day of work here 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4411 We're not supposed to take requests but we can squeeze in 'Closing Time'. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4412 Oh, don't worry. I'll take the next one. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4413 Don’t even think about it. Hotel food will cause you to hear a cacophony of sounds...not all coming from a tuba, 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4414 is there a parade on this floor? 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4415 Awooga... 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4416 We're going to the deaf-school. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4417 Weren’t you on the Titanic.? 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4418 I’ll get the next one, no big whoop 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4419 We've come to toot your horn 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4420 Sorry -- the bagpipers are one floor up. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4421 Please join us. And let us know who’s oompah pah you prefer. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4422 We believe social distancing shouldn't stop you from donating to the state orchestra. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4423 Just trying to keep the economy afloat 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4424 Pandemic say social distancing, so we are seated in the basement! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4425 We thought carrying these would ensure we stayed six feet away from each other and everybody else. We forgot about elevators. C'mon, squeeze in, there's a little room in the corner. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4426 they hired us to encourage you to keep your distance 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4427 Not a good day to forget my N95... 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4428 Tuba or not tuba--that ain't the question... how much spit can one of those hold d'ya think? 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4429 Look, we needed something cheaper than an N95 mask to keep people six feet away. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4430 Doctor Sousa, I presume? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4431 Live elevator music is common now thanks to the National Symphony Orchestra. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4432 Can we interest you in some elevator music? 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4433 We heard someone on 12 made a bad pun? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4434 Where are the76 trombones? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4435 We're here to make sure all the "I's" are dotted 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4436 We’ve just received our mask exemption 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4437 Another request for Old McDonald? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4438 OOOPS -OOOMPAPA 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4439 the a cappella solo's up next 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4440 Yeah I know, it sounds crazy, but the CDC's social-distancing guidelines explicitly exclude Souzaphones! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4441 March up the stairs kid. We are filling this space with everything top to bottom to ensure social distancing. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4442 Is the Wedding Chapel on this level? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4443 Are you the flue player ? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4444 Are you going humppa or downpa? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4445 We're headed for the roof where we can practice. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4446 We're here for the John Philip Sousa Convention. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4447 No, we're not a marching band. These are portable blowers while the A/C is out. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4448 There's room for three trumpeteers 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4449 Thanks, but I'll wait for the woodwinds. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4450 We''ve only got room for a "pah." 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4451 We've been here for weeks. Have things go down the tubas? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4452 OMM PAH! Going down! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4453 Hail to the chief" " Vote for him" Hey, Carl you can't knock minimum wage today 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4454 Muzak is not working today. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4455 Well, it's only fair that it's our turn in the lift! We've been taking the stairs all of our lives. You on the other hand? You are a vile creature, and have always been, Kevin! Now scram! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4456 We're here to play for the twin's double orchestra birthday party. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4457 Don't let this one pass you by. We've stepped back so you can move in front. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4458 They did say "shelter in place"... 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4459 Marching Band season already?????? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4460 Mind if I horn in for a floor or two? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4461 Excuse me, have you seen the parade? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4462 are you Donald trump 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4463 You the guy that ordered the sad trombones from Soundtrack Your Life? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4464 Are you ascending or descending? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4465 Two to toot tuba! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4466 Going we play “ Up up and away” We play the same thing going down. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4467 OOMPAH OOMPAH, YOURSELF. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4468 If you don't have earplugs, I'd suggest using the stairs. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4469 We're on our way to the roof. Our playing nudges people to self-isolate. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4470 Don't worry -- we won't ask you to sing. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4471 We like to think of it as a more intimate alternative to Muzak. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4472 We've replaced your usual elevator music. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4473 This is not what I meant when I said there needs to be more music in the elevator. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4474 We're out of face masks. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4475 We're standing in until the speaker is fixed. 1.0893 0.02879 56 52 4 0
4476 Sorry, we've been marching all day. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4477 Piano on elevator to your right. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4478 The next 38 elevators - 76 trombones. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4479 And we are doing our part. The rest of the band is on floors two, three, four, five, six... 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4480 You are going to have to wait for the next lift. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4481 Tuba-d. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4482 I can't explain why our inner tubes have microphones and we're on the deck of a destroyer. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4483 I had a feeling today was gonna blow 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4484 A fine social distancing instrument 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4485 We know , we know, at least 6 feet apart, yeah... 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4486 God dammit do these look like Tuba's to you? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4487 We only see floor G-flat, but do you know if there’s an F-sharp? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4488 No, still not the bass-ment. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4489 Stop! You guys are scaring the flowers. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4490 We couldn't fit in 76 trombones. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4491 I'll pass. I can't stand elevator music. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4492 What do you mean you forgot your sousaphone? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4493 Excuse me, is the fitness center on this floor? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4494 Come in and we will blow your horn 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4495 Going to a lower note! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4496 Hope you’re in to elevator music! 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4497 We were sent here by the top brass. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4498 We think hepple.CFNetwork.NSURLSession.{7675A836-6772-490D-9900-59DB2A0DF248}{(null)}{Y}{Y}{{www.facebook.com:443}www.faceb 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4499 Be honest. Which one of us would you rather listen to going down to the lobby?" 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4500 Have you heard the one about five harpists in a beetle? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4501 Can you hum "Ride of the Valkyries"? 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4502 No, we don’t mind you ignoring social distancing as long as you don’t mind us playing a Sousa march. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4503 Y'all know wayah the pool is, these tubes ah gittin' heavy 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4504 Gee, that was awkward elevator talk. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4505 I've never been a fan of brass instruments either. 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4506 You'd think I wouldn't have to specify I wanted a low note, but here we are. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4507 Just wait til you see the freight elevator. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4508 Only clarinets. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4509 Can you point us to the nearest balcony? 1.0893 0.04613 56 52 3 1
4510 We should warn you that there is a 'Deliverance' vibe in here. 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
4511 Hey guys, let me ask you a question. What do you think you need to do to get into heaven? I know for a fact that I’ll be in Heaven because I’ve accepted Jesus Christ as my lord and savior and I follow his teachings that are written in the Bible...... 1.0862 0.04458 58 54 3 1
4512 If someone's in your social distancing bubble you can scream at them via tuba. It's quite satisfying. 1.0857 0.03370 70 64 6 0
4513 Sorry, no vacancy. Try the freight elevator. 1.0833 0.03598 60 55 5 0
4514 It helps with social distancing. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4515 Tuba for the price of one. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4516 We've been social distancing for decades. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4517 We're playing 'Dueling Tubas'. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4518 We're looking for bass notes in the restaurant's wine cellar. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4519 I'll take the next one, I prefer no elevator music. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4520 I can see you guys give a hoot! 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4521 We are the Horns and you are.... 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4522 We can working on in turning these into ventilators. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4523 We got the “pa pa.” You got the “ump?” 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4524 The acoustics are great in the basement. Going down, sir? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4525 Don't blame us! They won't let us panhandle out front. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4526 Hang in there - the oboes are on the next car! 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4527 We're practicing sousa distancing. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4528 Tubular, man. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4529 Don’t worry. We tested negative. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4530 Busy as he is with COVID-19, the Angel of Death enlisted us to recruit you for our band. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4531 We're the Blows Brothers. Hop in and be one of the first to experience a new kind of elevator music. Enjoy. Sing along. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4532 Elevator music reached a new low. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4533 So I wanted a little Oomph in my life, but not a lot of Oomph Pa Pa. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4534 We may look like it but we're not the whistle blowers. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4535 The OTHER elevator has the usual music. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4536 If you've got a flute in your bag, hop in. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4537 We’re loo for a singer to goon tour 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4538 I hope you brought ear plugs. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4539 YOU CANNOT ENTER PLEASE WEAR SAFE DISTANCE BELT FIRST 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4540 I know , not everyone likes elevator music 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4541 Looks like the party’s over! 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4542 C'mon in, if you don't mind standing amidst 76 trombones. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4543 Is this the floor for the John Philip Sousa convention? 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4544 Percussion's on floor 5. 1.0755 0.05285 53 51 0 2
4545 Come on down! ... join the rest of the '76 trombone players' as we transpose Irish St. Paddy's Day tunes for this year's New York's 'End-Corona-Parade' ! 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4546 So yeah, once you figure out how to balance yourself at the top of the Mobile Bathroom™️ and manage to shit into the patented Vertical Toilet©️, the fecal matter will funnel straight into my mouth! 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4547 Live elevator muzak! 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4548 Did you happen to see 76 trombones anywhere in your travels? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4549 Ben it's casual Friday! 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4550 He’s having an angel, with two horns, installed atop his tower. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4551 We’re gonna bring this all the way down 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4552 Trump and Attorney William Barr - Now that blowing your own horn is on the Dictator’s Manifesto 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4553 We tested positive... 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4554 Sorry--there's only room for a flugelhorn 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4555 Come on ! The Michigan Fight song ? Really? Do you know how long its been since they were relevant? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4556 We find trumpets elevate the experience. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4557 Sorry, this elevator is only for people who like Oompah band music. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4558 Would you rather this or Muzak buddy? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4559 Get on, we need the sheet music. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4560 First, the cab; now, the elevator. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4561 Tuba-d you're not part of the band. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4562 it keeps people away and also doubles as a recyclable grocery bag 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4563 I'm not getting in the elevator with you Sousaphonies today. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4564 We only go to the basement. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4565 But, I only play the piccolo 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4566 Corona Concert, you coming ? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4567 Nothing socially distances like a good oom-pah! 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4568 Great party on 26. Umpah-pa. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4569 Well, Harold. I guess you’ve heard you’re late! 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4570 I’d take the stairs, but the rest of the band wasn’t moving so fast. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4571 We had to move things indoors. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4572 Going up -- 4 notes? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4573 Did you bring your earplugs? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4574 Going back up. I forgot my sheet. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4575 Yup-a-tuba-duo! 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4576 Do you know "Going My Way" 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4577 No, I’m the “Oom,” YOU’RE the “pah pah”! 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4578 The other elevator has pianos; your choice. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4579 Elevator music concerts are standing-room only 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4580 If you have a flute in that bag you can join us. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4581 Would you care to be our muse? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4582 Sousaphones, actually. The tubas usually take the stairs. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4583 The seventy-six trombones are in quarantine. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4584 YOU WON'T BELIEVE THE ACOUSTICS IN HERE! I SAID, YOU WON'T BELIEVE THE ACOUSTICS IN HERE! THE ACOUSTICS! 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4585 We’re headed up to the chord room. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4586 Is this floor Two-ba? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4587 Sorry your jacuzzi is on the fritz, but we're not quite limber enough to play upside down. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4588 Zoom meetings really make clothing experimental. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4589 We thought only non-essential events were canceled. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4590 Polka the number, get a song! 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4591 If you wish to be lifted up you'll have to wait for the violins to come in. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4592 The Muzak System is out of order. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4593 Sorry, no violas 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4594 going down? / 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4595 I’ll wait for the next quiet car. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4596 We're on the DOWNbeat. Want to join us? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4597 You'll have to catch the next elevator. This is our way to keep social distancing. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4598 I'd take the other one, he's expelling wind. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4599 Sir, would you care to lead a parade anywhere, anytime, about anything? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4600 Bruce should b here any second 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4601 Floor TWO-ba? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4602 Cannon Fodder? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4603 Whenever a fat guy enters the elevator we greet him with emblematic music. That’s the job. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4604 Play me out to Imperial March please, I am going to see my ex wife. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4605 Only tuba per elevator please. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4606 We're two tubas on two. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4607 I don’t recall this sort of horn mentioned in any of the reviews. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4608 We have just had a Tsunami warning. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4609 There's room in the rumble seat. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4610 The acoustics in here are just too good to brass up. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4611 We’re stand-ins for the Muzak until the landlord gets it fixed 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4612 Have you seen 74 guys who look like us? We’ve stopped at every floor. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4613 Grubhub delivery? No Tubahub delivery. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4614 This car only goes down. 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4615 We're looking for the Souzaphone birds of a feather session. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4616 Feels like we're going viral. Wanna jump aboard? 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4617 Sir, we don’t give a toot about your platform, today or in November!” 1.0755 0.04547 53 50 2 1
4618 I can't stay six feet apart, I'll take the next one. 1.0755 0.03663 53 49 4 0
4619 I will wait for the ship 1.0727 0.03534 55 51 4 0
4620 Damn it! This ain't Carnegie Hall!!! 1.0714 0.03473 56 52 4 0
4621 Tuba, or not tuba, that is the question: The answer, is not tuba; sousaphone. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4622 Don’t blame us. The city insisted that we hold the Thanksgiving parade on the roof. That’s how I knew that they don’t know what a parade *is.* 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4623 We are here to inform you that your wife ordered sixteen marching bands for the parade. Your total cost is $1456.99 plus tax. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4624 Congratulations, office live is back to normal! 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4625 Our self-isolating skills have peaked. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4626 We're here to play Trump's new rendition of 'Hail to the Chief'. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4627 A messenger bag? How embarrassing for you. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4628 Tuba or not tuba... and quantity? That is the question Amazon Prime will ask you. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4629 Singing to the tune of "One enchanted evening") "Isolation evening!" 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4630 Do you mind? These are designed to keep everyone more than six feet away 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4631 'Tuba Tuba two." 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4632 C’mon in, we’re not getting off. We’re here to let you know when you’ve reached your floor. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4633 If my skin could hear sunlight after quarantine 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4634 Virus busters--why do you ask? 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
4635 Considering the state the world is in today, I would be happy to take the stairs! 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4636 I believe this is the wrong number. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4637 What floor is the weight loss convention? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4638 It could have been worse. Their first choice was piano music. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4639 One of your neighbors wanted to get some antique brass fixtures installed in her apartment. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4640 Which way to the marching line? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4641 Hey, we can squeeze you in, especially if you don't mind painfully loud music and positive-tested spittle spray from the horns. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4642 Tubular, Man, tubular.” 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
4643 Thank God! We're just trying to ditch the CORONets! 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4644 There is not room for 6ft of social distancing. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4645 Muzak's busted: we're the replacement. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4646 Go ahead. I'm waiting for the string section. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4647 No Harold, this is the main level. We want the garage. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4648 and this is exactly why i only take the stairs. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4649 Is this the tuba quarantine floor? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4650 If it's not oompa, it's not sh*t. 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
4651 Ben. Fred. Elevator speakers broken again?" 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
4652 We are heading down to put the bass in “basement” 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4653 (The woman in the ocean) 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4654 We're both nicknamed 'ba' in case you're wondering - but we go by 'Two Ronnies' 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4655 Sorry bud, we are using the elevator for the acoustics in here. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4656 Did you see a marching band go by? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4657 Tell us your favorite--the Muzak is broken. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4658 Hey it’s not weight alert, it’s social distancing where elevator allows only 2 persons” Karishma Virani-Queens, N 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4659 Yeah, but Muzak doesn't take requests. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4660 Luckily, you strike me as someone who appreciates Sousa. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4661 It's okay! We know not to toot in an elevator. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4662 Did the oompa band get off on this floor? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4663 Going up?" "There's only room for Tuba. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4664 Corporate decided not to renew the elevator music license. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4665 Sorry. This car is only for the obese. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4666 Sheila has company, so we’re practicing in here. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4667 The new guy forgot his sousaphone. Clearly he doesn’t know what it means to be a DUI attorney yet. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4668 We're playing a trio. Fred had to take the next car. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4669 Ready for some fanfare? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4670 We were contracted to shore up the building's bass. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4671 Get on loser, we are going to go follow people and play walk cycle music. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4672 We are trying to keep our head above water. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4673 Sorry, this one's full; someone insisted on a duet. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4674 Sorry if we ruined the guess-which-elevator-door-opens-first game. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4675 We’re out of tune, can you hum us a low C? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4676 They're sousaphones, you idiot, not tubas. "Will you be playing your sousaphones in the elevator?" 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4677 Sorry pal, looks like the elevator can only hold tubas at a time. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4678 I ordered “tubers” for their long shelf life, not “tubas”! 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4679 I'm confused they said we should all band together, but how do we do that with social distancing? 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
4680 (Man screaming !!) followed by silence and then (A long fart) 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4681 We're the wakeup call for room 1201. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4682 Think of it like this: It could have been worse, you might have had to ride down with two bagpipes players. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4683 Prepare your way to haven; our rooms are full tonight. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4684 Sorry, we just answered the ad for Elevator Music 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4685 I'd say come on in, but you know, this social distancing thing... 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4686 Going down? Social distancing says you'll have to take the next elevator to join the parade. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4687 The office is the only quiet place to practice these days. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4688 With Covid you have to watch your toilets, we don’t want to deal with a shortage. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4689 The other 74 of us are on furlough.. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4690 Twobah's a company - three's a crowd. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4691 Sorry. It'll be a while. 76 trombones to the top floor! 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
4692 It's a Sousaphone, not a Tuba... but you're right, Tuba Twins does roll off the tongue better 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4693 You might want to take the next one.We are practicing.... 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4694 the piped-in elevator music broke down so we’re the replacement. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4695 Are the top brass on this floor? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4696 You guys are really into heavy metal" 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4697 ... so now a loose Stereo Sousa instead of a loose Cannon ... Great, soon, the Press conference is in the basement Gents ! 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4698 Wait your turn, motherf--! 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4699 Sorry we were looking for the bass-ment,get it? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4700 We sure made a fool of the sign that said the weight limit was two people and one tuba. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4701 Tuba or no tuba? No, the question is, "Going up or going down?" 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4702 Sorry, Frank. It is the only thing that works to stop people from invading our space. Catch the next one. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4703 Oh, now I realise. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4704 ..They called us in because the elevator music stopped working. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4705 I think I’ll wait for the pick a low. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4706 Next one has the horns 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4707 Looks like there's no room on the elevator. That's tubad. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4708 If you were hoping for traditional elevator music, you'll have to wait for the other one. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4709 Ladies lingerie? 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
4710 Going way way down? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4711 The speaker broke, but this is just as good 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4712 Hey, mister, can you draw a tuba? 'Cause this is as good as the guy who's drawing US can do. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4713 We're here for the social distancing class. Ta Da!" 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4714 I know what you're thinking: a tuba section? In this economy?!!" 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4715 mental stress in times of covid-19 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4716 Is this the 13th floor? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4717 Social distancing is easier now! 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4718 We put the OO in 'oompah'. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4719 Things could get pretty loud for the next ride 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4720 You'd better hurry. They're running out of tubas. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4721 We came up with our own ventilators just to be safe. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4722 If you must know, we play in small venues and we’re called the 2 bahs. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4723 The Muzak system broke, we’re the temporary replacement. Robert E. Mayer Warsaw, IN 46580 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4724 Sorry, we are practicing our elevator pitch. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4725 Lower Floors Only 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
4726 Takes two to tango. Not sure how to make it a trio. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4727 Oh yeah, trombone sale on eighth floor go for it. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4728 When we descend to the parking level, we shall achieve the proper, and lowest register. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4729 My wife likes a man in uniform. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4730 I was happy just to carry the thing, but get the elevator you said, it will be quicker... 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4731 Is this the g flat 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4732 I'm going to kill god with my sound. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4733 We found our niche in elevator music. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4734 Tubad the other elevator is out of service. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4735 You can come in,but it's going to be loud. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4736 We only have an opening for a flutist. If you gotta flute in there, you're in! 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4737 Going up? We’re rehearsing for the Denver concert." 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4738 The lifebuoys I expected but the giant floating eyes were a step too far. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4739 And here's a little ditty called "Stay Six Feet Away." 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4740 Is this floor one or tuba? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4741 Dueling distancing team at your service, ma'am. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4742 It’s a $5 cover charge. 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
4743 We're playing Bach's arrangement of elevator sounds. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4744 Again, while we are testing the air-levetor, please refrain from the fried beans. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
4745 You two are not abiding by the social distancing guideline! 1.0588 0.03328 51 48 3 0
4746 You might consider social distancing. 1.0577 0.03265 52 49 3 0
4747 We'll take you to the bassment. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4748 I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD SAY I LOVED MUZAK! 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4749 Need your eardrums blown out, sir? 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4750 Merry Christmas to all. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4751 We are practicing social distancing! It takes our breath six feet to get from one end to the other. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4752 Can you tell him to stay 6 feet away? 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4753 Sorry, the rest of us were ordered to stay home. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4754 We are going up, but the tone is going dooooooooown. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4755 Playing keeps people more than 6 feet away. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4756 Good Evening, New York, we are "Two Tubas, Too Furious!" 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4757 and he decided to take the next elevator... 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4758 I'd say we'll squeeze, but that satchel of yours is a bit bulky. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4759 You are not dressed for the occasion 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4760 That's OK, I never liked tubas anyway. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4761 Headed to the flat party? 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4762 Trade? Two Tubas for Two N95 Masks????? 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4763 Oh god - what a pain in the brass 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4764 Do you know if a marching band is staying on this floor? 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4765 Sorry, we've only got room for maybe one piccolo player. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4766 Sousaphones? No. Toiletpaperrollophones? Yes. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4767 You wish they were tubas. 1.0435 0.03040 46 44 2 0
4768 The Musak is down but we've got you covered. 1.0426 0.02976 47 45 2 0
4769 It takes two to tuba. 1.0426 0.02976 47 45 2 0
4770 You look surprised - have you never heard of the inner tuba before? 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4771 We've been hired to raise the bar on elevator music. Any requests? 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4772 The elevator music was missing something. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4773 Congratulations on the sex 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4774 Brass section... going D O W N. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4775 the good thing is hes a real boy. the bad thing is he has termites. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4776 We're here to enforce social distancing. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4777 Sorry, you need a tuba for proper social distancing. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4778 It keeps the 6 feet of social distancing really simple. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4779 Can we play Paranoid? You betcha. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4780 Hop on. We're going loud! 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4781 You may want to stay socially distant on another elevator. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4782 It's time to come blow your horn! 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4783 And, back into the annoying musician chamber you go. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4784 Step in if you wanna Get Down! 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4785 I told you elevator music is making a comeback. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4786 Sure, take the next elevator. We're pretty used to people social distancing from us. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4787 We're just looking for the water aerobics class- we are the live band 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4788 I'll wait,its just the tuba yas. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4789 We are trying live music for your elevator entertainment. Please enjoy, and no tipping. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4790 We'll breathe into the tubas the whole way as long as you applaud at the end. 1.0408 0.02856 49 47 2 0
4791 Amazon didn’t mention this fringe benefit. 1.0400 0.02799 50 48 2 0
4792 Yes, this elevator does go all the way to the top and as you know the cure won’t work unless you play in the key of F all the way. Playing in the Trump Tower is just a way to hedge our bet. 1.0400 0.02799 50 48 2 0
4793 We're going down to the bass clef—I mean, basement. 1.0400 0.02799 50 48 2 0
4794 I knew the reunion gathering was going to be a small party!But what in the world is this?! 1.0400 0.02799 50 48 2 0
4795 Flotation device? Yeah. We're going down. 1.0400 0.02799 50 48 2 0
4796 Is this the floor with the oompah roompah? 1.0392 0.02745 51 49 2 0
4797 Our new parading in place and playing for an up and down economy. 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4798 please tell me you can you play the harmonica 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4799 We failed social distancing. 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4800 6 feet distance please! 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4801 May we suggest you put on your noise canceling headphones. 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4802 Have you seen a Marching Band? 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4803 I was having trouble with the whole social distancing thing... 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4804 It worked for Mary Kate and Ashley 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4805 Youre just 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4806 The super fixed the heat. 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4807 Catch the next parade, buddy! 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4808 ...I'll take the stairs. Would you play me out? 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4809 Can you tell us where 4G is? We're supposed to meet the bagpipe band for the 6 AM reheasal. 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4810 This is so much nicer then my grandfather had it on the Titanic! 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4811 Since this is a cartoon, we can only play when going down. 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4812 Everyone knows that nobody stands within 6 feet of a tuba playing couple, “OOMPAH” 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4813 We're taking the Tiny Desk Concert on tour. 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4814 Great, more elevator music. 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4815 Instruments of Chaos 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4816 What do you mean you prefer piccolos? 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4817 where do we set up... this isn't the right place is it 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4818 Oh when the saints ... go marching in ... The parade's been cancelled. The funeral's on the roof! 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4819 Tuba Response Team here. What's the nature of your emergency? 1.0233 0.02353 43 42 1 0
4820 Are you the piccolo?” Will Hunter, Plymouth M 1.0227 0.02299 44 43 1 0
4821 we practice only between floors 1.0222 0.02247 45 44 1 0
4822 Is your instrument collapsible? 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4823 Did you see which floor the rest of our marching took? 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4824 Come on in. A horny experience may do you some good these days. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4825 It's our practice room. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4826 You think this is bad? The percussion section is coming next. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4827 We are looking for the Captain not the Purser! 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4828 The building management wanted something different from the regular elevator music. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4829 It keeps people even more than 6 feet away. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4830 I was a clarinetist before social distancing. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4831 I find this the best way to maintain social distancing. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4832 No, there's no room for you, Mr. Plays-Harmonica-After-Midnight. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4833 Do you know Street Player? 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4834 Actually, we're doing the parade in our rooms via Zoom meeting. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4835 I’ll take the next one, you two are violating the building’s rules for social distancing 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4836 Sorry. We keep our social distance in E flat. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
4837 Do you mind taking the next one? We're practicing in here because the acoustics are really excellent. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4838 No, we're part of a new show: "The Wages of Sin." 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
4839 The other lift’s a polka band, so welcome aboard. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4840 Floor 3: guitars, bowed strings, and woodwinds. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4841 Guess you haven't heard they cancelled the parade for social distancing! 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4842 We've been assigned to be your personal backing track. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4843 This is a bad mood elevator. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4844 It's the most practical way we've found to practice social distancing 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4845 No, it's NOT a tuba. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4846 What floor? Floor seven and up will give us enough time for Beethoven or Mozart. Anything less and I’m afraid we’ll have to settle for your run o’ the mill elevator jazz. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4847 No sorry, we only the one genre. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4848 We’ve found that Sousaphones provide more than ideal social distance. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4849 Hi-Is the wdding on this floor? 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4850 Check out our merch table in the lobby for CDs and t-shirts. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4851 Welcome to the tuba-lift."_Cal Bellamy_Munster, I 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4852 This elevator is full of toots. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4853 We're one of the new Muzak Live stations. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0