These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.
Name | Value |
---|---|
Submission deadline | 2020-03-01T22:59:00.000Z |
Voting started | - |
Voting ended | 2020-03-15T22:05:00.000Z |
Finalists announced | 2020-03-09T22:04:00.000Z |
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued | March 16, 2020 |
Number of captions | 5932 |
Number of responses | 1192068 |
Number of participants | - |
In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.
Rank | Caption | Mean | Precision | Total votes | "Unfunny" votes | "Somewhat funny" votes | "Funny" votes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
0 | Two of you have underlying issues. | 2.2122 | 0.00657 | 12059 | 2127 | 5243 | 4683 |
1 | You need help - on so many levels. | 2.1045 | 0.00640 | 13248 | 2979 | 5900 | 4362 |
2 | So, I gather your health plan didn't tell you what a Tier III plan is. | 2.0508 | 0.00625 | 16530 | 4936 | 5812 | 5775 |
3 | Linda, why do you think men are 'beneath' you? | 2.0279 | 0.00646 | 14452 | 4163 | 5713 | 4566 |
4 | Where shall we begin--with acrophobia, claustrophobia, or fear of being crushed? | 2.0089 | 0.00656 | 13444 | 3830 | 5660 | 3946 |
5 | Well, Freud never had to pay rent in Manhattan. | 2.0081 | 0.00737 | 11672 | 3655 | 4267 | 3746 |
6 | Patient number two, same question. | 1.9964 | 0.00874 | 7805 | 2341 | 3151 | 2313 |
7 | Welcome to Medicare for All at the Same Time | 1.9933 | 0.00935 | 7429 | 2435 | 2609 | 2385 |
8 | Don’t worry, I am certified to treat multiple personalities. | 1.9628 | 0.00959 | 6535 | 2090 | 2598 | 1847 |
9 | Have you considered the possibility that you are three separate people? | 1.9538 | 0.00712 | 12620 | 4345 | 4507 | 3760 |
10 | Okay, now let's start at the top. | 1.9216 | 0.00778 | 9607 | 3196 | 3964 | 2445 |
11 | I know it's our first session, but I'm going to say codependence is at least a part of your problem. | 1.9192 | 0.00652 | 13601 | 4519 | 5656 | 3419 |
12 | Trust me. You're not alone. | 1.8879 | 0.00740 | 10778 | 3848 | 4284 | 2642 |
13 | You knew when you voted for Bernie that "Medicare for all' would involve some compromises. | 1.8816 | 0.00693 | 13223 | 5069 | 4650 | 3501 |
14 | And how do you feel about how she feels about how he feels? | 1.8459 | 0.00913 | 7341 | 2895 | 2679 | 1765 |
15 | Well, time's up. Leave your groupon with my secretary. | 1.8404 | 0.00815 | 9489 | 3866 | 3266 | 2353 |
16 | Not only is the group discount a bargain, you’ll feel better just hearing how screwed up the others are. | 1.8333 | 0.01079 | 5339 | 2177 | 1875 | 1287 |
17 | Sibling rivalry, middle child syndrome, fear of falling...anything else? | 1.8326 | 0.00713 | 11419 | 4428 | 4464 | 2517 |
18 | Which one of you is my patient and which two of you are from AirBNB? | 1.8307 | 0.00810 | 9752 | 4085 | 3230 | 2433 |
19 | Now, let's explore your obsession with berth order... | 1.8238 | 0.00791 | 10055 | 4203 | 3418 | 2431 |
20 | Trust me, Sheila, the other two voices you keep hearing are most definitely not in your head. | 1.8229 | 0.00843 | 8031 | 3127 | 3197 | 1705 |
21 | Okay, time for another lightning round. Worst childhood memory. | 1.8225 | 0.01581 | 2434 | 994 | 878 | 562 |
22 | Then you shouldn’t have come to Costco for your counseling. | 1.8203 | 0.00758 | 10997 | 4641 | 3684 | 2668 |
23 | Do you prefer "he," "she" or "they?" | 1.7989 | 0.00866 | 8269 | 3564 | 2799 | 1900 |
24 | Everything you say to me is strictly confidential. | 1.7779 | 0.00947 | 6793 | 2989 | 2322 | 1481 |
25 | Remind me again, which one of you was a middle child? | 1.7501 | 0.00738 | 9970 | 4260 | 3933 | 1771 |
26 | You asked if I could sandwich you into my schedule this afternoon. | 1.7318 | 0.01516 | 2446 | 1103 | 896 | 447 |
27 | You each have issues on one level or another. | 1.7293 | 0.00839 | 7759 | 3454 | 2948 | 1354 |
28 | So, I may have underestimated the severity of your multiple personality disorder. | 1.7214 | 0.00823 | 8362 | 3854 | 2977 | 1525 |
29 | Today we’re going to work on your codependence issues, your separation anxiety, and your fear of heights. | 1.7203 | 0.00870 | 7251 | 3285 | 2704 | 1258 |
30 | Now calm down, it's not unusual to have a ménage à trois, what's unusual is that Timothy is pregnant. | 1.7146 | 0.01003 | 6481 | 3297 | 1731 | 1450 |
31 | That was no typo. I’m a licensed threeapist. | 1.7124 | 0.01025 | 5758 | 2808 | 1796 | 1153 |
32 | This is wrong on so many levels! | 1.7106 | 0.00936 | 6708 | 3221 | 2203 | 1280 |
33 | I see. I see. I see. | 1.7106 | 0.01269 | 3507 | 1644 | 1234 | 629 |
34 | You're lucky I could squeeze you in | 1.7037 | 0.00977 | 5691 | 2638 | 2099 | 953 |
35 | It's amazing how many responses you get when your ad says: "Threesomes, every hour on the hour." | 1.7013 | 0.01883 | 1694 | 837 | 526 | 331 |
36 | ..and what makes you feel like you've lost your identity? Number 1? | 1.7009 | 0.01061 | 4978 | 2359 | 1745 | 871 |
37 | we are working with so many ex-Trump staff, we have to combine the sessions | 1.6983 | 0.02067 | 1475 | 754 | 412 | 309 |
38 | You said you wanted group therapy. | 1.6871 | 0.01109 | 4522 | 2185 | 1561 | 771 |
39 | I can't tell you which, but one of these couches is a placebo. | 1.6798 | 0.01266 | 3698 | 1878 | 1125 | 693 |
40 | Let's start at the top. | 1.6772 | 0.00958 | 5917 | 2888 | 2058 | 965 |
41 | It's an idea I had while flying coach. | 1.6765 | 0.01541 | 2300 | 1120 | 804 | 376 |
42 | I'm sorry. Our 16 2/3 minutes are up. | 1.6727 | 0.05203 | 220 | 113 | 66 | 41 |
43 | Your id, ego, and superego are very well defined | 1.6694 | 0.00981 | 5893 | 2965 | 1903 | 1019 |
44 | How does it make you feel that I can only validate one parking ticket? | 1.6612 | 0.01474 | 2642 | 1357 | 823 | 462 |
45 | So, how are we? | 1.6598 | 0.01736 | 1784 | 886 | 619 | 279 |
46 | Good night, Id. Good night, Ego. Good night, Superego. | 1.6533 | 0.01555 | 2299 | 1175 | 746 | 378 |
47 | What did you think universal healthcare was going to look like?... | 1.6524 | 0.01028 | 5340 | 2756 | 1681 | 900 |
48 | I see you brought all your personalities today. | 1.6492 | 0.00955 | 5784 | 2894 | 2023 | 866 |
49 | And why don't you feel special? | 1.6463 | 0.01155 | 4023 | 2043 | 1359 | 620 |
50 | By working this way, we find that two out of three patients leave feeling like their problems aren't quite so bad after all... | 1.6456 | 0.02182 | 1078 | 535 | 390 | 153 |
51 | You each have a third of my undivided attention. | 1.6418 | 0.01864 | 1569 | 809 | 513 | 247 |
52 | I should have been more specific on the 3-for-1 Groupon... | 1.6411 | 0.01034 | 5143 | 2668 | 1651 | 823 |
53 | Debbie got the top bunk because she has better insurance, Doug, not because her parents love her more. | 1.6282 | 0.01197 | 3722 | 1959 | 1192 | 567 |
54 | Nothing has changed. The one with the highest co-pay gets the top bunk. | 1.6247 | 0.01383 | 2755 | 1437 | 915 | 403 |
55 | Welcome to Groupon therapy | 1.6226 | 0.01037 | 5111 | 2733 | 1572 | 805 |
56 | We'll start at the top with 'fear of heights,' move on to 'claustrophobia,' then end with 'everyone looks down on me.' | 1.6199 | 0.01224 | 3565 | 1886 | 1148 | 531 |
57 | Is 'they' your preferred pronoun? | 1.6189 | 0.01100 | 4492 | 2401 | 1400 | 690 |
58 | You have my undivided attention. | 1.6185 | 0.01213 | 3539 | 1852 | 1181 | 504 |
59 | The technical term is aestrascastraphobia, or fear of summer camp." | 1.6185 | 0.01168 | 4031 | 2169 | 1225 | 630 |
60 | The first thing I want you to know is that you're not alone. | 1.6157 | 0.01674 | 1712 | 866 | 638 | 208 |
61 | Yes, it is possible that you are tripolar. | 1.6014 | 0.01363 | 2835 | 1537 | 891 | 407 |
62 | You can't just say 'ditto.' | 1.5940 | 0.01541 | 2192 | 1196 | 690 | 306 |
63 | …and Janice, please stop saying “I see monsters under my bed.” | 1.5903 | 0.01332 | 3080 | 1728 | 880 | 469 |
64 | And what do you think triggers these memories of summer camp? | 1.5848 | 0.01293 | 3056 | 1687 | 951 | 413 |
65 | It's the difference between $100 an hour and $300 an hour. And as a bonus, you get to make new friends. | 1.5823 | 0.01338 | 2866 | 1583 | 897 | 386 |
66 | I am better at treating one person with multiple personalities than three people with no personality. | 1.5803 | 0.01548 | 2290 | 1308 | 631 | 349 |
67 | We'll now begin our first session of trickle-down psychiatry. | 1.5769 | 0.01396 | 2640 | 1473 | 809 | 357 |
68 | I thought I'd begin this session with a few words about berth order. | 1.5752 | 0.01442 | 2573 | 1467 | 732 | 374 |
69 | I’m reminding you that you spent the entire last session arguing over who goes first. | 1.5718 | 0.01430 | 2506 | 1407 | 763 | 335 |
70 | Sorry- your multiple personalities will have to pay separately. | 1.5698 | 0.01441 | 2557 | 1463 | 725 | 365 |
71 | But psychotherapy has never been debunked. | 1.5687 | 0.01485 | 2432 | 1403 | 675 | 354 |
72 | Yes, of course. It is disturbing on many levels. | 1.5641 | 0.01553 | 2106 | 1193 | 636 | 276 |
73 | It's just a workaround... insurance pays one third of my rate | 1.5618 | 0.01516 | 2218 | 1264 | 662 | 292 |
74 | You're suffering from, respectively, low, medium, and high shelf esteem. | 1.5613 | 0.01596 | 2054 | 1185 | 585 | 284 |
75 | I treat for multiple personality disorder but bill each personality separately. | 1.5607 | 0.01584 | 2092 | 1210 | 591 | 291 |
76 | This is what I call trickle down psychiatry | 1.5597 | 0.02039 | 1215 | 692 | 366 | 157 |
77 | Today, group, I'd like each of you to tell me why you think psychotherapy is a lot of bunk. | 1.5596 | 0.05388 | 193 | 115 | 48 | 30 |
78 | You do understand that the closer we get to the November election, the more crowded these sessions are going to become, right? | 1.5586 | 0.02501 | 802 | 456 | 244 | 102 |
79 | Ok, boys. Just describe your feelings when a girl is on top. | 1.5580 | 0.02108 | 1156 | 665 | 337 | 154 |
80 | This week we're going to try something called "trickle-down" therapy. | 1.5573 | 0.01612 | 2015 | 1171 | 565 | 279 |
81 | No need to be ashamed; patients often tier up during group sessions. | 1.5560 | 0.01606 | 2043 | 1193 | 564 | 286 |
82 | Thank you for sharing. | 1.5556 | 0.01723 | 1719 | 990 | 503 | 226 |
83 | Patient number one, tell me why you don't feel special. | 1.5491 | 0.01651 | 1821 | 1047 | 548 | 226 |
84 | Stop changing places. 3 card monte always snookers me. | 1.5468 | 0.01934 | 1730 | 1137 | 241 | 349 |
85 | Yes I’m sorry, cutbacks in insurance coverage. And please don’t listen when it’s not your turn. | 1.5445 | 0.01767 | 1642 | 980 | 437 | 222 |
86 | Multiple personality #1, this question is for you. | 1.5440 | 0.01697 | 1669 | 955 | 520 | 194 |
87 | Have you considered that it might not be multiple personality disorder? | 1.5424 | 0.01745 | 1641 | 966 | 462 | 208 |
88 | And what did you think I meant by a "three for one" session? | 1.5402 | 0.01728 | 1568 | 893 | 503 | 172 |
89 | Next time splurge for better insurance. By the way, Bottom Bunk - your 15 minutes are up. | 1.5390 | 0.01859 | 1527 | 917 | 397 | 213 |
90 | I suspect multiple personality disorders. | 1.5369 | 0.01906 | 1503 | 919 | 361 | 223 |
91 | Until you’re off your parents’ insurance, this is how it works. | 1.5361 | 0.01839 | 1425 | 827 | 432 | 166 |
92 | Because I still have student bills to pay off, that’s why. | 1.5338 | 0.01886 | 1437 | 852 | 390 | 188 |
93 | Really? NONE of you blames your mother? | 1.5332 | 0.02142 | 1039 | 603 | 318 | 118 |
94 | What did you think three-for-one deal meant? | 1.5326 | 0.01902 | 1397 | 831 | 386 | 179 |
95 | And you all still feel lonely? | 1.5314 | 0.01911 | 1370 | 814 | 384 | 172 |
96 | Why do you feel like the odds are stacked against you? | 1.5314 | 0.01966 | 1387 | 849 | 339 | 199 |
97 | If he had my overhead, Freud would have done the same thing! | 1.5313 | 0.01901 | 1372 | 812 | 390 | 169 |
98 | OK, Ego. First we'll hear from you. Then Id. Then Superego. | 1.5301 | 0.01889 | 1345 | 787 | 403 | 155 |
99 | The only way to get to the bottom of this, is to start from the top. Often the truth lies somewhere in the middle. | 1.5301 | 0.01874 | 1362 | 796 | 410 | 156 |
100 | Well,what did you think group therapy would be like? | 1.5298 | 0.01956 | 1342 | 808 | 357 | 177 |
101 | This is Manhattan. Get over it. | 1.5294 | 0.02237 | 935 | 542 | 291 | 102 |
102 | Ok. We've decided who gets the top bunk. That's a good start. I'll see you next week. | 1.5270 | 0.01951 | 1296 | 771 | 367 | 158 |
103 | Sorry about the set up here but it really does pay to read your insurance fine print | 1.5265 | 0.01945 | 1263 | 742 | 377 | 144 |
104 | Group therapy isn’t for everyone | 1.5264 | 0.01995 | 1290 | 780 | 339 | 170 |
105 | One check or separate checks? | 1.5249 | 0.01995 | 1223 | 726 | 352 | 145 |
106 | No, I can't give you separate checks. You'll have to work it out yourselves. | 1.5249 | 0.01983 | 1244 | 740 | 355 | 149 |
107 | I heard you the third time... | 1.5225 | 0.02175 | 1133 | 703 | 268 | 162 |
108 | That's all our time today, that's all our time today, and that's all our time today. | 1.5203 | 0.02065 | 1182 | 717 | 315 | 150 |
109 | Welcome to your Groupon therapy session. | 1.5190 | 0.02086 | 1158 | 710 | 297 | 149 |
110 | We can begin when everyone places their hands on their stomach" | 1.5189 | 0.02211 | 1085 | 674 | 259 | 152 |
111 | Okay, let’s take it from the top ... | 1.5183 | 0.02075 | 1150 | 695 | 314 | 141 |
112 | Which personality is speaking now? | 1.5168 | 0.02158 | 1130 | 702 | 272 | 156 |
113 | So you slept your way to the top? | 1.5157 | 0.02341 | 954 | 592 | 232 | 130 |
114 | Groupon psychiatry | 1.5154 | 0.02255 | 1102 | 705 | 225 | 171 |
115 | I know you might get the impression that psychiatry is a lot of bunk ... | 1.5135 | 0.02127 | 1075 | 649 | 298 | 127 |
116 | I see you chose to put yourself above everyone else. Interesting. | 1.5122 | 0.02180 | 1062 | 653 | 274 | 135 |
117 | Welcome to acrophobia, claustrophobia, and fear of being in middle-management therapy. | 1.5110 | 0.02252 | 1047 | 659 | 241 | 147 |
118 | How do you feel you stack up? | 1.5094 | 0.02127 | 1015 | 604 | 305 | 106 |
119 | This isn't what I had in mind when you said we should explore my issues with my parents | 1.5090 | 0.05938 | 167 | 110 | 29 | 28 |
120 | At the end of today's session, one of you will be voted off the lounger. | 1.5072 | 0.02210 | 972 | 588 | 275 | 109 |
121 | The hard part was cutting the umbilical cord. We're good now. | 1.5066 | 0.02377 | 981 | 633 | 199 | 149 |
122 | To begin, let’s start with Bob, the middle child. | 1.5042 | 0.02228 | 950 | 576 | 269 | 105 |
123 | Well here's hoping you're all here for the same problem | 1.5041 | 0.02314 | 859 | 516 | 253 | 90 |
124 | Group therapy is NOT bunk! Why does everyone keep saying that? | 1.5037 | 0.02345 | 947 | 598 | 221 | 128 |
125 | What did you expect when you bought a therapy session on Groupon? | 1.5019 | 0.04216 | 259 | 156 | 76 | 27 |
126 | I'm sorry,which one of you is afraid of heights? | 1.4989 | 0.02437 | 886 | 565 | 198 | 122 |
127 | An agoraphobe, an acrophobe, and a claustrophobe walk into a psychiatrist’s office… | 1.4983 | 0.02380 | 877 | 548 | 221 | 107 |
128 | Yes, if you are wondering I still haven't paid off my student loan. | 1.4964 | 0.02425 | 695 | 405 | 235 | 55 |
129 | In these sessions we'll work toward dismantling the illusion that one of you always comes out on top. | 1.4953 | 0.02381 | 852 | 529 | 224 | 99 |
130 | So Martha, you’ve been a bed wetter since childhood...? | 1.4943 | 0.02866 | 617 | 391 | 147 | 79 |
131 | OK, OK, I’m sorry if you feel therapy is just a lot of bunk. | 1.4927 | 0.02441 | 824 | 517 | 208 | 99 |
132 | So, tell me about these imaginary friends. | 1.4925 | 0.02414 | 802 | 494 | 221 | 87 |
133 | So,let us begin our Uber share therapy session. Shall we begin on top? | 1.4920 | 0.02545 | 815 | 525 | 174 | 113 |
134 | I got my licence from Ikea. | 1.4914 | 0.02411 | 812 | 502 | 219 | 90 |
135 | We should have thought of the bathroom before starting therapy today shouldn't we have! | 1.4912 | 0.02500 | 798 | 505 | 194 | 99 |
136 | So when did you first realize you weren't triplets? | 1.4901 | 0.02439 | 808 | 505 | 210 | 93 |
137 | The "Medicare for all" family plan | 1.4894 | 0.02513 | 803 | 513 | 187 | 103 |
138 | What makes you think you're not treated as individuals? | 1.4893 | 0.02372 | 791 | 481 | 233 | 77 |
139 | They have reduced our psychologists by two-thirds. | 1.4878 | 0.02537 | 777 | 495 | 185 | 97 |
140 | Shall we take it from the top? | 1.4878 | 0.02430 | 777 | 479 | 217 | 81 |
141 | Well, I'm here to help debunk those feelings. | 1.4873 | 0.02832 | 552 | 336 | 163 | 53 |
142 | Zoloft, Xanax, Prozac....NEXT!! | 1.4869 | 0.02500 | 762 | 483 | 191 | 88 |
143 | Now I understand one of you has a bedwetting problem? | 1.4838 | 0.02590 | 740 | 473 | 176 | 91 |
144 | Sorry for the over-booking. We're being overwhelmed by the presidential stress epidemic | 1.4830 | 0.02617 | 735 | 473 | 169 | 93 |
145 | The sign painter misspelled it "threepy," and I just went with it. | 1.4829 | 0.02601 | 733 | 469 | 174 | 90 |
146 | I understand it can be difficult being a White House Press Secretary. | 1.4827 | 0.02781 | 663 | 430 | 146 | 87 |
147 | I don’t think it’s dissociative identity disorder if you’re actually three separate people. | 1.4817 | 0.02545 | 712 | 444 | 193 | 75 |
148 | Today we can work on our collective unconscious. | 1.4815 | 0.02769 | 702 | 465 | 136 | 101 |
149 | How does it make you feel that I’m charging each of you the full hourly rate. | 1.4813 | 0.02691 | 721 | 471 | 151 | 98 |
150 | On the bright side, misery loves company. | 1.4812 | 0.02392 | 719 | 451 | 201 | 65 |
151 | It’s a new part of my practice called Tri-chiatry | 1.4798 | 0.02745 | 717 | 475 | 136 | 104 |
152 | Many say that psychotherapy is a lot of bunk | 1.4785 | 0.02698 | 698 | 454 | 154 | 90 |
153 | Some say my group therapy sessions are all bunk. You'll have to judge for yourself. | 1.4785 | 0.02652 | 698 | 445 | 165 | 84 |
154 | I’m taking group therapy to another level. | 1.4775 | 0.02524 | 689 | 425 | 199 | 65 |
155 | It's the latest in group counseling...the top bunk pays the highest rate and get's the last word. | 1.4770 | 0.02688 | 696 | 452 | 156 | 88 |
156 | You may not cry. But you may tier up. | 1.4756 | 0.02581 | 677 | 423 | 186 | 68 |
157 | You may feel alone, but you’re clearly not. | 1.4751 | 0.02528 | 684 | 423 | 197 | 64 |
158 | The buy one get two free promotion was intended for multiple visits. | 1.4736 | 0.02440 | 663 | 423 | 181 | 57 |
159 | This is my first literal "split personality" case. | 1.4734 | 0.02849 | 657 | 439 | 125 | 93 |
160 | Ok, let's begin by discussing your berth order. | 1.4724 | 0.02704 | 635 | 403 | 164 | 68 |
161 | Try to avoid talking down to the person beneath you. | 1.4712 | 0.02605 | 643 | 400 | 183 | 60 |
162 | Now that you're all comfortable, I'm afraid we're out of time. | 1.4712 | 0.02768 | 643 | 418 | 147 | 77 |
163 | I'm sorry, Janet, but I'm not going to bring the ladder back out until you open up some more. | 1.4711 | 0.02840 | 605 | 392 | 141 | 72 |
164 | Welcome, and thank you for using the Groupon for my special "Mother Issues Monday." | 1.4702 | 0.02730 | 638 | 410 | 156 | 72 |
165 | So, you learned you are triplets from 23 and me? | 1.4701 | 0.02737 | 636 | 409 | 155 | 72 |
166 | So you feel like someone is coming between you two? | 1.4693 | 0.02590 | 586 | 353 | 191 | 42 |
167 | And how did that make you feel? And how did that make you feel? And how did that make you feel? | 1.4692 | 0.02811 | 616 | 400 | 143 | 73 |
168 | What did you expect with my three-for-one promotion? | 1.4691 | 0.02789 | 631 | 411 | 144 | 76 |
169 | Don't all talk at once | 1.4690 | 0.02867 | 629 | 416 | 127 | 84 |
170 | So, the consensus is that the threesome was NOT a success. | 1.4685 | 0.02763 | 619 | 398 | 152 | 69 |
171 | Always remember that you are unique, just like everybody else! | 1.4669 | 0.02667 | 619 | 389 | 171 | 59 |
172 | Private session? I'm sorry, you're in a tiered health care plan. | 1.4667 | 0.02659 | 615 | 390 | 166 | 59 |
173 | To start the healing process, let’s debunk birth order. | 1.4658 | 0.02761 | 599 | 382 | 155 | 62 |
174 | Everybody loved Bernie's healthcare plan before the election. | 1.4652 | 0.02823 | 604 | 393 | 141 | 70 |
175 | Now you understand why they call it Tri-Care. | 1.4652 | 0.02881 | 604 | 399 | 129 | 76 |
176 | How did you think I would counsel a ménage a trois? | 1.4651 | 0.02690 | 602 | 378 | 168 | 56 |
177 | So it all started in summer camp? | 1.4651 | 0.02638 | 602 | 373 | 178 | 51 |
178 | So, Tammy, why do you always insist on being the superego? | 1.4643 | 0.02912 | 616 | 413 | 118 | 84 |
179 | Okay, let me get this straight, you have a fear of heights, you have claustrophobia and you’re just here for a nap. | 1.4642 | 0.02731 | 586 | 369 | 162 | 55 |
180 | I’m a practitioner in a form of therapy known as trickle-down. | 1.4635 | 0.02846 | 589 | 383 | 139 | 67 |
181 | I had a different concept in mind when I signed up for group therapy. | 1.4626 | 0.02919 | 588 | 388 | 123 | 74 |
182 | And, all together now, how did that make you feel? | 1.4625 | 0.02957 | 586 | 392 | 117 | 77 |
183 | So as you can see, we had to stack up the appointments for today. | 1.4622 | 0.02734 | 582 | 367 | 161 | 54 |
184 | Welcome to TrumpCare. | 1.4596 | 0.02915 | 570 | 378 | 125 | 67 |
185 | So, tell me how you feel about Medicare for All. | 1.4592 | 0.02840 | 564 | 363 | 143 | 58 |
186 | My approach is a little bit of Jung, a little bit of Freud and a whole lot of Henry Ford. | 1.4581 | 0.02929 | 513 | 327 | 137 | 49 |
187 | Well, you voted for him, now you'll have to deal with the Medicare cuts. | 1.4580 | 0.02968 | 559 | 371 | 120 | 68 |
188 | All right, we’ll start at the top and get to the bottom of this. | 1.4578 | 0.02820 | 557 | 356 | 147 | 54 |
189 | Correction: “You’re here today because two’s company but three’s crazy.” | 1.4559 | 0.02984 | 544 | 360 | 120 | 64 |
190 | Before we begin, rest assured that our session will be kept semi-private. | 1.4550 | 0.02756 | 545 | 342 | 158 | 45 |
191 | So to explore the effects of sibling birth order, I've stacked you by age. | 1.4532 | 0.02954 | 534 | 350 | 126 | 58 |
192 | So, it's acrophobia, claustrophobia, and low self-esteem. Or did I mix that up? | 1.4530 | 0.02877 | 532 | 348 | 132 | 52 |
193 | I charge by the patient not the hour | 1.4525 | 0.03094 | 526 | 355 | 104 | 67 |
194 | As a rule of thumb, I just assume one third of my patients will become well adjusted members of society. | 1.4525 | 0.03163 | 526 | 359 | 92 | 73 |
195 | Now, if everyone talks about their mothers at once we can both validate and normalize your behaviors simultaneously. | 1.4525 | 0.03035 | 526 | 350 | 114 | 62 |
196 | Let's wait for your dog to arrive. | 1.4525 | 0.02799 | 526 | 337 | 142 | 46 |
197 | When did you first suspect you weren't identical triplets? | 1.4512 | 0.02947 | 492 | 314 | 134 | 44 |
198 | The correct answer gets the session for free. | 1.4511 | 0.03116 | 521 | 353 | 101 | 67 |
199 | I see that this is a problem on multiple levels | 1.4510 | 0.02860 | 510 | 323 | 144 | 43 |
200 | Mormon couples counseling | 1.4509 | 0.03028 | 519 | 344 | 116 | 59 |
201 | So...you’re having trouble moving on from college dorm life. | 1.4507 | 0.02872 | 517 | 330 | 141 | 46 |
202 | So let's start with your mothers. | 1.4507 | 0.03205 | 517 | 357 | 87 | 73 |
203 | I'm afraid this is all your insurance will pay for. | 1.4506 | 0.04337 | 233 | 150 | 61 | 22 |
204 | Well, that's a lot of bunk. | 1.4506 | 0.03111 | 506 | 339 | 106 | 61 |
205 | Don't complain to me, you're the one who wanted the group rate. | 1.4492 | 0.02851 | 512 | 335 | 130 | 47 |
206 | Are you sure you followed the Ikea instructions? | 1.4492 | 0.03071 | 512 | 341 | 110 | 60 |
207 | Let’s take it from the top. | 1.4492 | 0.02851 | 512 | 325 | 144 | 43 |
208 | Summer camp anxiety therapy does not include calling our mommies to pick us up right now. | 1.4488 | 0.03224 | 508 | 351 | 86 | 71 |
209 | I know you're all different, but you're all crazy. | 1.4475 | 0.03127 | 505 | 341 | 102 | 62 |
210 | With this groupon, you each get 15 minutes. Let's start from the top. | 1.4473 | 0.02914 | 503 | 323 | 135 | 45 |
211 | It’s my trickle down theory of family happiness. | 1.4465 | 0.03082 | 495 | 329 | 111 | 55 |
212 | So, what brings you in today, besides the Groupon? | 1.4447 | 0.03018 | 488 | 319 | 121 | 48 |
213 | It’s not a multiple personality disorder when you’re different people. | 1.4447 | 0.02919 | 488 | 312 | 135 | 41 |
214 | So you feel like a sardines in the office, working in closed cubicles side by side. Tell me more... | 1.4444 | 0.03191 | 486 | 330 | 96 | 60 |
215 | Welcome to health care for all. | 1.4444 | 0.02985 | 486 | 315 | 126 | 45 |
216 | Which one of you thinks three's a crowd? | 1.4444 | 0.03137 | 486 | 326 | 104 | 56 |
217 | Thank you for participating in our double blind trial. At least one of you will be getting placebo psychology and one of you is a planted control group. | 1.4442 | 0.03174 | 484 | 327 | 99 | 58 |
218 | These new family sessions often end in tiers | 1.4442 | 0.02994 | 484 | 314 | 125 | 45 |
219 | You’re not alone in thinking that privacy is not the same as secrecy. | 1.4442 | 0.03160 | 484 | 326 | 101 | 57 |
220 | In this case, three is not a crowd it's a trilogy. | 1.4428 | 0.03175 | 481 | 325 | 99 | 57 |
221 | Will this be on one bill or separate? | 1.4426 | 0.03115 | 479 | 319 | 108 | 52 |
222 | As we begin Family Counseling, please try to ignore that you are my family .... | 1.4423 | 0.03329 | 477 | 331 | 77 | 67 |
223 | Your health insurance only covers a group session but I want you to feel special. | 1.4421 | 0.03246 | 475 | 325 | 90 | 59 |
224 | Multiple personality is not a disorder when you are multiple people. | 1.4414 | 0.02924 | 469 | 298 | 135 | 36 |
225 | Glad to see you're all adjusting to the new HMO. | 1.4407 | 0.03191 | 472 | 319 | 98 | 55 |
226 | One of you is the least crazy and will be leaving us this week. | 1.4399 | 0.03089 | 466 | 307 | 113 | 46 |
227 | Couch #2, same question. | 1.4397 | 0.02982 | 473 | 306 | 126 | 41 |
228 | On the phone, when you said you felt like three different people, this is not what I thought you meant. | 1.4397 | 0.03217 | 464 | 314 | 96 | 54 |
229 | In less than an hour, you will have two new problems. | 1.4395 | 0.03293 | 471 | 326 | 83 | 62 |
230 | I can assure you, psychology is not all bunk. | 1.4376 | 0.03311 | 457 | 315 | 84 | 58 |
231 | Take comfort in the fact that your co-pay has dropped by two-thirds! | 1.4376 | 0.03007 | 457 | 295 | 124 | 37 |
232 | What other people? We are here to discuss your schizophrenia. | 1.4376 | 0.03163 | 457 | 305 | 104 | 48 |
233 | Today, I’d like to start with a frank discussion about dependency issues. | 1.4376 | 0.03102 | 457 | 300 | 111 | 44 |
234 | This is how medicare for all really works. | 1.4376 | 0.03311 | 457 | 315 | 84 | 58 |
235 | What makes you feel they're helicopter parenting? | 1.4374 | 0.03293 | 455 | 312 | 87 | 56 |
236 | This new economy seating isn't perfect, but you should be grateful i'm not charging extra for your baggage. | 1.4374 | 0.03233 | 455 | 308 | 95 | 52 |
237 | I know it may seem a bit irregular but your company's mental health coverage just updated. Okay, so who wants to begin? | 1.4374 | 0.03293 | 455 | 312 | 87 | 56 |
238 | Only two more sessions and all of you will have met the deductible | 1.4371 | 0.03229 | 453 | 306 | 96 | 51 |
239 | Tell me about your two imaginary friends. | 1.4361 | 0.03148 | 438 | 288 | 109 | 41 |
240 | Imagine you are alone. Now, breathe. | 1.4356 | 0.03319 | 450 | 309 | 84 | 56 |
241 | I'm sorry, but your insurance only covers group therapy. | 1.4347 | 0.03150 | 444 | 294 | 107 | 43 |
242 | So how did it make you feel that Goldilocks liked his porridge best? | 1.4347 | 0.03338 | 444 | 308 | 80 | 56 |
243 | How does it make you feel that this isn't the threesome you were expecting? | 1.4347 | 0.03245 | 444 | 300 | 95 | 49 |
244 | Don’t worry, everything you say is confidential. | 1.4347 | 0.03133 | 444 | 293 | 109 | 42 |
245 | On the plus side, this format is fully covered by your company's mental health group benefit. | 1.4340 | 0.03118 | 447 | 295 | 110 | 42 |
246 | Anyone have a dream this week that wasn't about a sandwich? | 1.4325 | 0.03168 | 437 | 290 | 105 | 42 |
247 | Margaret is in the lead with three breakthroughs. | 1.4324 | 0.03425 | 407 | 278 | 82 | 47 |
248 | So, on a scale of one to ten, how intrusive would you say your parents are? | 1.4312 | 0.03343 | 429 | 294 | 85 | 50 |
249 | You're not schizophrenic. You are three people. | 1.4306 | 0.03162 | 425 | 280 | 107 | 38 |
250 | You are not alone. | 1.4286 | 0.03152 | 420 | 274 | 105 | 37 |
251 | So, tell me about your separation anxiety. | 1.4286 | 0.03188 | 420 | 278 | 104 | 38 |
252 | Ok, everybody. Let's take it from the top. | 1.4286 | 0.03293 | 420 | 284 | 92 | 44 |
253 | Why don't we have whoever is the most depressed start first? | 1.4286 | 0.03328 | 420 | 286 | 88 | 46 |
254 | I'm the oldest so I get to be the mom/therapist. | 1.4286 | 0.03395 | 420 | 290 | 80 | 50 |
255 | Actually, the effectiveness of group therapy hasn't been debunked. | 1.4286 | 0.03428 | 420 | 289 | 75 | 51 |
256 | Further evidence Freud was bunk. | 1.4286 | 0.03543 | 420 | 299 | 62 | 59 |
257 | We’ll have to do it this way in order for your insurance to cover it. | 1.4282 | 0.03234 | 418 | 279 | 98 | 40 |
258 | I'm testing the theory that bad things always happen in threes. | 1.4275 | 0.03204 | 407 | 268 | 104 | 35 |
259 | Oh, I see what you mean about 'berth trauma.' | 1.4272 | 0.03339 | 412 | 279 | 88 | 44 |
260 | The point is that you are not so special after all. | 1.4272 | 0.03120 | 412 | 268 | 112 | 32 |
261 | See Jackie? I told you last session I'd help you get over your exes. | 1.4272 | 0.03176 | 412 | 271 | 106 | 35 |
262 | Welcome to speed therapy. | 1.4272 | 0.03139 | 412 | 269 | 110 | 33 |
263 | Have you all signed the confidentiality agreement? | 1.4272 | 0.03024 | 412 | 263 | 122 | 27 |
264 | So... why don't we start from the top? | 1.4268 | 0.03147 | 396 | 256 | 111 | 29 |
265 | What makes you think you're co-dependent? | 1.4268 | 0.03266 | 396 | 262 | 99 | 35 |
266 | I see our 20 minutes is over. | 1.4263 | 0.03147 | 434 | 289 | 105 | 40 |
267 | So, how does it feel to be female, fat or young? | 1.4258 | 0.03449 | 411 | 286 | 75 | 50 |
268 | Okay, now let's peel back the layers of what you're feeling. | 1.4254 | 0.03564 | 409 | 291 | 62 | 56 |
269 | Well, what did you all think 'group practice' meant? | 1.4254 | 0.03192 | 409 | 270 | 104 | 35 |
270 | I'm pretty sure you have multiple personalities. | 1.4254 | 0.03479 | 409 | 285 | 72 | 51 |
271 | I see you've brought your alter-egos. | 1.4254 | 0.03192 | 409 | 270 | 104 | 35 |
272 | You all belong to the worst HMO I've ever seen. | 1.4254 | 0.03269 | 402 | 268 | 97 | 37 |
273 | This can easily be debunked | 1.4251 | 0.03350 | 407 | 277 | 87 | 43 |
274 | Ellen, 'sometimes' is too subjective. It's 'yes' or 'no'. Let's try again. Do you like being on top? | 1.4251 | 0.03259 | 407 | 272 | 97 | 38 |
275 | Tell me more about these two other voices you hear in your head. | 1.4251 | 0.03087 | 407 | 263 | 115 | 29 |
276 | Alice, can you see how sleeping on the top bunk with Irritable Bowel might upset Tim and Bobby? | 1.4251 | 0.03350 | 407 | 277 | 87 | 43 |
277 | Life's about getting to the top bunk, without a ladder. | 1.4250 | 0.03538 | 400 | 281 | 68 | 51 |
278 | Sorry for the overbooking. You can start by introducing yourselves to each other. | 1.4243 | 0.03429 | 403 | 278 | 79 | 46 |
279 | I think I am hearing voices. Is it just me or do you hear them too? | 1.4236 | 0.03435 | 399 | 275 | 79 | 45 |
280 | Let me get this straight - you have a fear of being in the middle and the bottom; you have a fear of being on top and on the bottom; you have a fear of being on top and the middle. Is that about right? | 1.4236 | 0.03544 | 399 | 280 | 67 | 51 |
281 | Your HMO covers 15 minutes of group therapy. | 1.4236 | 0.03435 | 399 | 275 | 79 | 45 |
282 | To qualify for the family discount you must speak in unison. | 1.4236 | 0.03399 | 399 | 273 | 83 | 43 |
283 | How does that make us feel? | 1.4235 | 0.03308 | 392 | 264 | 91 | 37 |
284 | On the bright side, you get to split the co-pay three ways. | 1.4235 | 0.03588 | 307 | 200 | 84 | 23 |
285 | Maybe we shouldn't have gotten our therapist from Costco. Fred Trenk, Towaco, New Jersey | 1.4213 | 0.03485 | 394 | 274 | 74 | 46 |
286 | I hear you, Megan, but it is simply not the case that student loans are bad for everyone. | 1.4209 | 0.03517 | 392 | 274 | 71 | 47 |
287 | I'm sorry, I thought it was clear when I said you were bunked for one session. | 1.4209 | 0.03498 | 392 | 273 | 73 | 46 |
288 | In these situations, I find it helpful to start a the bottom and work my way up. | 1.4209 | 0.03082 | 392 | 252 | 115 | 25 |
289 | You’re not alone. You’re all bedwetters. | 1.4209 | 0.03517 | 392 | 274 | 71 | 47 |
290 | Let’s focus today’s session on codependency. | 1.4205 | 0.03217 | 390 | 266 | 90 | 34 |
291 | Next session we will see how you cope when the cots are stacked against you. | 1.4205 | 0.03473 | 390 | 270 | 76 | 44 |
292 | Let's see we have fear of heights, middle child issues and feeling down, right ? | 1.4205 | 0.03217 | 390 | 259 | 98 | 32 |
293 | Which personality has health insurance? | 1.4205 | 0.03217 | 390 | 257 | 102 | 31 |
294 | Tell me more about why you think camp scarred you for life. | 1.4197 | 0.03219 | 386 | 254 | 102 | 30 |
295 | We have just enough time left for a lightning round. | 1.4192 | 0.03347 | 365 | 242 | 93 | 30 |
296 | You all have problems on different levels. | 1.4184 | 0.03296 | 380 | 253 | 95 | 32 |
297 | Look, as far as I'm concerned, you're all Mark, okay? | 1.4178 | 0.03440 | 383 | 263 | 80 | 40 |
298 | OK, Boomer. GenX and Millenial say you're up first. | 1.4178 | 0.03420 | 383 | 262 | 82 | 39 |
299 | And you'll get and even bigger discount if you all have the same phobia. | 1.4178 | 0.03298 | 383 | 256 | 94 | 33 |
300 | Group therapy is easier when you don’t see eye to eye | 1.4171 | 0.03420 | 398 | 276 | 78 | 43 |
301 | Your problems are layered | 1.4169 | 0.03259 | 379 | 251 | 98 | 30 |
302 | If you are afraid of heights, try arriving on time next week. | 1.4169 | 0.03446 | 379 | 260 | 80 | 39 |
303 | I can see we're dealing with multiple issues here. | 1.4169 | 0.03280 | 379 | 251 | 96 | 31 |
304 | Let's work on your obsessive desire for undivided attention. | 1.4169 | 0.03280 | 379 | 252 | 96 | 31 |
305 | Well, you voted for health care for all.” | 1.4167 | 0.03588 | 384 | 272 | 64 | 48 |
306 | Each of you has my full attention. | 1.4164 | 0.03335 | 377 | 253 | 91 | 33 |
307 | Your insurance provider requires you all to agree on a neurosis. | 1.4160 | 0.03304 | 375 | 250 | 94 | 31 |
308 | So, who first suggested couples therapy? | 1.4160 | 0.03652 | 375 | 267 | 60 | 48 |
309 | So, fear of heights, claustrophobic, and low self esteem. Who wants to start? | 1.4160 | 0.03326 | 375 | 251 | 92 | 32 |
310 | The father of psychoanalysis. Please phrase your response in the form of a question. | 1.4160 | 0.03533 | 375 | 261 | 72 | 42 |
311 | When did you start believing you have multiple personalities? | 1.4155 | 0.03547 | 373 | 260 | 71 | 42 |
312 | So, she wanted another man in bed and this is what you thought she meant? | 1.4151 | 0.03478 | 371 | 255 | 78 | 38 |
313 | If you think it's crowded now, imagine if he's reëlected. | 1.4151 | 0.03478 | 371 | 255 | 78 | 38 |
314 | Answer "yes" with thumbs up, "no" with thumbs down. | 1.4151 | 0.03602 | 371 | 261 | 66 | 44 |
315 | One of you is real. Two are figments. Wanna vote | 1.4146 | 0.03596 | 369 | 259 | 67 | 43 |
316 | I want to understand why you all think therapy is bunk. | 1.4146 | 0.03513 | 369 | 255 | 75 | 39 |
317 | This will go smoother if you all have the same issue. | 1.4146 | 0.03319 | 369 | 246 | 93 | 30 |
318 | I think there was a misunderstanding when we discussed third-party payment. | 1.4146 | 0.03636 | 369 | 260 | 63 | 45 |
319 | I'm not loving this Medicare for All. | 1.4146 | 0.03274 | 369 | 244 | 97 | 28 |
320 | Yes, dissociative identity disorder is not that uncommon, but it is rare to have such fully developed multiple personalities. | 1.4146 | 0.03428 | 369 | 251 | 83 | 35 |
321 | Now Jerome, tell me more about these two imaginary friends that follow you everywhere and copy everything you do. | 1.4142 | 0.03397 | 367 | 248 | 86 | 33 |
322 | Again, who here said my ideas are bunk? | 1.4142 | 0.03651 | 367 | 260 | 62 | 45 |
323 | This is how your HMO can offer a reduced "group" rate. | 1.4141 | 0.03510 | 384 | 268 | 71 | 44 |
324 | Billy, I when I said “try therapy”, I did not mean “tri-therapy”. | 1.4141 | 0.03269 | 384 | 259 | 92 | 32 |
325 | I didn't think anybody would be interested in this Groupon deal... | 1.4140 | 0.03386 | 372 | 252 | 86 | 34 |
326 | When did you first suspect you're not identical triplets? | 1.4137 | 0.03252 | 365 | 240 | 99 | 26 |
327 | So how's that menage-a-trois going? | 1.4137 | 0.03583 | 365 | 255 | 69 | 41 |
328 | Sorry. My appointments have really been stacking up this week. | 1.4137 | 0.03252 | 365 | 240 | 99 | 26 |
329 | This isn't what the 3 for 1 voucher meant ...but seen as you've gone to such trouble.. | 1.4130 | 0.03368 | 368 | 248 | 88 | 32 |
330 | The other two of you pretend you didn’t hear that. | 1.4121 | 0.03674 | 313 | 212 | 73 | 28 |
331 | Remember your ids, egos, and superergos are your three dimensional chess pieces. | 1.4116 | 0.03517 | 362 | 250 | 75 | 37 |
332 | William, you are high-get off the drugs. Dan, you are suffering from middle child syndrome. Dave, you have low esteem. Now I will need to make a copy of all of your insurance cards and collect your copayments before we start treatment.” | 1.4115 | 0.03678 | 384 | 279 | 52 | 53 |
333 | If you ask me, it's a lot of bunk | 1.4115 | 0.03469 | 384 | 268 | 74 | 42 |
334 | I want the adults here to consider who suffers the most if it all falls apart. | 1.4111 | 0.03639 | 360 | 254 | 62 | 42 |
335 | I still think you misread the groupon... | 1.4111 | 0.03281 | 360 | 238 | 96 | 26 |
336 | So I'm guessing... separation anxiety? | 1.4111 | 0.03161 | 360 | 236 | 96 | 22 |
337 | Sorry. . . But what did you expect for $45 an hour. | 1.4111 | 0.03618 | 360 | 252 | 65 | 41 |
338 | Sanders calls it "Medicare for All" | 1.4111 | 0.03397 | 360 | 243 | 86 | 31 |
339 | With our new three tear health care system the top tear can cry for 5 minutes, the middle tear for 3 minutes and the bottom tear for 1 minute. | 1.4111 | 0.03805 | 360 | 262 | 48 | 50 |
340 | Next week, Id rotates to Ego, and Ego rotates to Superego. | 1.4110 | 0.05640 | 146 | 102 | 28 | 16 |
341 | ...and my Ph.D. thesis was on The Role of IKEA in Family Dynamics. | 1.4108 | 0.03265 | 370 | 246 | 96 | 28 |
342 | So” How long have you all, Been sleeping together | 1.4108 | 0.03586 | 370 | 261 | 66 | 43 |
343 | Tell me about that day at summer camp. | 1.4108 | 0.03545 | 370 | 259 | 70 | 41 |
344 | Are you experiencing feelings of anxiety that life is just stacked against you? | 1.4106 | 0.03718 | 358 | 256 | 57 | 45 |
345 | I’m just practicing for Medicare for All | 1.4106 | 0.03654 | 358 | 253 | 63 | 42 |
346 | Thruples Therapy | 1.4106 | 0.03739 | 358 | 256 | 55 | 46 |
347 | Blame, President Sanders! | 1.4106 | 0.03675 | 358 | 254 | 61 | 43 |
348 | I'm sure when you voted for Medicare for All, you weren't exactly expecting stacked counseling sessions, did you. | 1.4106 | 0.03654 | 358 | 253 | 63 | 42 |
349 | Good morning, Ego, Id and Super-Ego!!!! | 1.4106 | 0.03760 | 358 | 257 | 53 | 47 |
350 | The first one to answer gets 10 points | 1.4106 | 0.03654 | 358 | 253 | 63 | 42 |
351 | So why do you feel that you and your friends can’t move beyond your college days? | 1.4106 | 0.03246 | 358 | 235 | 99 | 24 |
352 | What brings you in to thruples therapy? | 1.4101 | 0.03647 | 356 | 251 | 64 | 41 |
353 | Trump's "three for the price of one" healthcare plan at work. | 1.4086 | 0.03715 | 350 | 249 | 59 | 42 |
354 | Great work, Jane. You've mastered the corporate ladder. | 1.4086 | 0.03603 | 350 | 244 | 69 | 37 |
355 | I'd say all three of you are compartmentalizing. | 1.4086 | 0.03319 | 350 | 232 | 93 | 25 |
356 | Sorry, I've forgotten which one of you is suffering from multiple personality disorder. | 1.4086 | 0.03737 | 350 | 250 | 57 | 43 |
357 | Was it Jane or Bob who said they felt unheard? | 1.4080 | 0.03332 | 348 | 231 | 92 | 25 |
358 | Okay, let’s take a tiered approach. | 1.4079 | 0.03225 | 353 | 231 | 100 | 22 |
359 | It's fine. The other two are just Airbnbers. | 1.4075 | 0.03539 | 319 | 214 | 80 | 25 |
360 | I’ll need your 3-fer coupon before we start our session. | 1.4075 | 0.03345 | 346 | 230 | 91 | 25 |
361 | I'm not sure which of you asked that but I want you to know I'm here for you. | 1.4075 | 0.03370 | 346 | 231 | 89 | 26 |
362 | If you think Medicare for All psychology is strange, wait until you see the new Medicare for All triple bypass surgery. | 1.4070 | 0.03530 | 344 | 236 | 76 | 32 |
363 | Thanks for answering my questions. I've chosen Mr.Jacobs to be the new receptionist" | 1.4065 | 0.03401 | 369 | 253 | 82 | 34 |
364 | Contestant Number Two, how would you describe your mother in just one word, and why? | 1.4063 | 0.03436 | 347 | 235 | 83 | 29 |
365 | There’s a reason that we call it “tiered pricing.” | 1.4059 | 0.03384 | 340 | 226 | 88 | 25 |
366 | Who wants to go first. | 1.4052 | 0.03678 | 343 | 241 | 63 | 38 |
367 | So how have your parents' IKEA habits effected your growth? | 1.4052 | 0.03438 | 343 | 232 | 83 | 28 |
368 | Don’t worry. You’re not alone. | 1.4052 | 0.03363 | 343 | 229 | 89 | 25 |
369 | I told you this would happen when you voted to end Obama Care! | 1.4052 | 0.03338 | 343 | 233 | 81 | 27 |
370 | Before we begin, I'd just like to say that this is the most convincing case of multiple personality disorder I've ever seen. | 1.4052 | 0.03286 | 343 | 226 | 95 | 22 |
371 | For the next question on our marketing survey, please indicate whether your bed is a) too hard; b) too soft; or c) just right. | 1.4047 | 0.03550 | 341 | 235 | 74 | 32 |
372 | Well, what were you expecting from group therapy? | 1.4047 | 0.03452 | 341 | 231 | 82 | 28 |
373 | ohhhh, so when an airlines treats you like this, it's OK? | 1.4047 | 0.03575 | 341 | 236 | 72 | 33 |
374 | Before we get started, will this be on separate checks? | 1.4047 | 0.03402 | 341 | 229 | 86 | 26 |
375 | You are the three finalists of this week’s cartoon contest | 1.4047 | 0.03599 | 341 | 237 | 70 | 34 |
376 | How does it feel having a woman and a black man above you? | 1.4041 | 0.03516 | 339 | 232 | 77 | 30 |
377 | So, how is your first quarantine week going? | 1.4041 | 0.03779 | 339 | 243 | 55 | 41 |
378 | Tell me about the trauma you experienced at summer camp | 1.4041 | 0.03590 | 339 | 235 | 71 | 33 |
379 | We could all be a little more supportive about Cindy’s bed wetting. | 1.4041 | 0.03565 | 339 | 234 | 73 | 32 |
380 | It’s new, I like to call it collective conscience therapy! | 1.4041 | 0.03825 | 339 | 245 | 51 | 43 |
381 | It’s not your fault. It’s not your fault. It’s not your fault. | 1.4040 | 0.03409 | 354 | 241 | 83 | 30 |
382 | You'll each have 90 seconds to answer, and then an additional 60 seconds for rebuttal. | 1.4036 | 0.03377 | 337 | 225 | 88 | 24 |
383 | What make you say that you never get enough personal attention? | 1.4036 | 0.03653 | 337 | 236 | 66 | 35 |
384 | Is anyone a happy camper yet? | 1.4030 | 0.03693 | 335 | 235 | 63 | 36 |
385 | Please stop referring to this method as a "pyramid schema." | 1.4030 | 0.03283 | 335 | 221 | 92 | 21 |
386 | What did you Bernie voters think would happen under "Medicare for All?" | 1.4030 | 0.03416 | 335 | 225 | 85 | 25 |
387 | When did you first realise you had multiple personalities? | 1.4030 | 0.03468 | 335 | 227 | 81 | 27 |
388 | Psychiatry’s not an exact science, so I have decided to use “Millennial Group Therapy.” | 1.4018 | 0.03870 | 331 | 240 | 49 | 42 |
389 | Just remember...you’re special | 1.4012 | 0.03549 | 324 | 221 | 76 | 27 |
390 | And, so, if I understand you correctly, you all have the same Jewish mother. | 1.4000 | 0.03620 | 325 | 225 | 70 | 30 |
391 | Ok, ...let’s start from the top. | 1.4000 | 0.03567 | 325 | 222 | 74 | 28 |
392 | Robert, I'm sorry, our eighteen minutes and thirty three seconds are up. | 1.4000 | 0.03261 | 325 | 212 | 96 | 17 |
393 | So, when did you decide it would be cheaper if you all came at once? | 1.4000 | 0.03849 | 325 | 233 | 52 | 39 |
394 | That's not how I imagined group therapy | 1.4000 | 0.03922 | 325 | 236 | 46 | 42 |
395 | I just want to remind you that the Groupon is only good for your first session. | 1.4000 | 0.03348 | 325 | 227 | 73 | 24 |
396 | Okay. Let me know when you start hearing those voices again ... | 1.4000 | 0.03517 | 335 | 230 | 76 | 29 |
397 | Now, let's see if we can debunk those feelings | 1.4000 | 0.03594 | 325 | 224 | 72 | 29 |
398 | Surely you didn't think 'three-for-one' meant individual sessions. | 1.4000 | 0.03514 | 325 | 221 | 78 | 26 |
399 | So, how long have you been experiencing multiple personalities? | 1.4000 | 0.03818 | 320 | 228 | 56 | 36 |
400 | I like to hear separately from the superego, ego, and id during sessions | 1.3994 | 0.03446 | 323 | 217 | 83 | 23 |
401 | In order to comply with HIPAA, I will refer to you as top, middle and bottom. | 1.3994 | 0.03303 | 323 | 215 | 86 | 20 |
402 | Now Karen, you know Martha called top bunk. | 1.3994 | 0.03965 | 323 | 237 | 43 | 43 |
403 | I'm glad you called, summer camp trauma is my specialty. | 1.3994 | 0.03582 | 323 | 222 | 73 | 28 |
404 | Client number two. Same question. If I chose to proceed with a Freudian Oedipal-Complex modality, how turned on would you be to make a long-term therapy commitment? | 1.3988 | 0.04032 | 321 | 238 | 38 | 45 |
405 | Now what makes you think you don't have my undivided attention? | 1.3988 | 0.03374 | 321 | 213 | 88 | 20 |
406 | Can you describe this feeling of being in a cartoon? | 1.3988 | 0.03808 | 321 | 229 | 56 | 36 |
407 | So, you both are in love with Elizabeth, but Elizabeth is in love with her cat. | 1.3987 | 0.03680 | 311 | 215 | 68 | 28 |
408 | Well, what did you expect when you use a Groupon? | 1.3970 | 0.03540 | 335 | 232 | 73 | 30 |
409 | When did you start feeling no one gave you undivided attention? | 1.3969 | 0.03577 | 320 | 220 | 73 | 27 |
410 | Now, tell me about your fear of intimacy. | 1.3969 | 0.02979 | 320 | 219 | 84 | 14 |
411 | Which one of you wants the gel pedicure that comes with this week's therapy-for-three Groupon? | 1.3962 | 0.03858 | 318 | 229 | 52 | 37 |
412 | It just feels wrong on so many levels. | 1.3962 | 0.03592 | 318 | 219 | 72 | 27 |
413 | I was able to sandwich you in before my 4 o'clock. | 1.3959 | 0.03683 | 293 | 200 | 70 | 23 |
414 | This is all your insurance company will pay for | 1.3956 | 0.03552 | 316 | 216 | 75 | 25 |
415 | Now who’s idea was this therapy sharing thing ... | 1.3956 | 0.03876 | 316 | 228 | 51 | 37 |
416 | Yours is a uniquely common problem, I'm afraid. | 1.3956 | 0.03928 | 316 | 230 | 47 | 39 |
417 | Welcome to Affordable Care meets Airbnb. | 1.3956 | 0.03495 | 316 | 214 | 79 | 23 |
418 | The terms of this discounted therapy session were clearly delineated in your Groupon receipts. | 1.3949 | 0.03841 | 314 | 225 | 54 | 35 |
419 | We just feel that our anxiety levels have elevated. | 1.3949 | 0.04023 | 314 | 232 | 40 | 42 |
420 | I don't know how you got there either, because Schwartz can't draw ladders. | 1.3949 | 0.03868 | 314 | 226 | 52 | 36 |
421 | The triplets meet for their weekly therapy session. | 1.3942 | 0.03965 | 312 | 228 | 45 | 39 |
422 | I anly have an hour. Which one of you is the most suicidal? | 1.3942 | 0.03751 | 312 | 220 | 61 | 31 |
423 | You don’t need to bring each of your personalities to our sessions! | 1.3942 | 0.03611 | 312 | 215 | 71 | 26 |
424 | I make more, you pay less, and you can compare your misery to the other two losers. | 1.3935 | 0.03569 | 310 | 212 | 74 | 24 |
425 | Yes, well, your problems will become more similar over time. | 1.3935 | 0.03712 | 310 | 215 | 64 | 29 |
426 | In this session, we'll confront your "hostel-ity | 1.3935 | 0.03823 | 310 | 221 | 56 | 33 |
427 | Welcome to the bunk bed phobia support group. | 1.3935 | 0.03823 | 310 | 221 | 56 | 33 |
428 | Might not have been such a great idea to include your mother in the family therapy | 1.3935 | 0.03957 | 310 | 226 | 46 | 38 |
429 | My theories may be unconventional, but they are not debunked. | 1.3935 | 0.03627 | 310 | 214 | 70 | 26 |
430 | Remind me, which of you is the chronic bedwetter? | 1.3935 | 0.03684 | 310 | 216 | 66 | 28 |
431 | HIPPA says you can't listen to the other persons answers during individual group therapy. | 1.3935 | 0.03850 | 310 | 222 | 54 | 34 |
432 | Did you like being an oarsman on the Athenian trireame? | 1.3922 | 0.04022 | 306 | 225 | 42 | 39 |
433 | No, Shirley, I don't think all therapy is bunk." (credit to son Julian Wise | 1.3922 | 0.03540 | 306 | 208 | 76 | 22 |
434 | So, what do you hope to accomplish in throuples counseling? | 1.3916 | 0.03965 | 309 | 226 | 45 | 38 |
435 | My fee is higher for multiple personality disorder. | 1.3914 | 0.03960 | 304 | 220 | 47 | 36 |
436 | ...And you just now found out he isn’t your biological son... | 1.3914 | 0.03960 | 304 | 221 | 47 | 36 |
437 | Today, we will learn about setting healthy boundaries. | 1.3907 | 0.03445 | 302 | 202 | 82 | 18 |
438 | My id didn't want to come today but super-ego said we all had to." | 1.3900 | 0.03739 | 300 | 210 | 63 | 27 |
439 | Just pick the richest one and have the other as the best man | 1.3900 | 0.03648 | 300 | 207 | 69 | 24 |
440 | I think that you might be tripolar. | 1.3900 | 0.03739 | 300 | 210 | 63 | 27 |
441 | My specialization is Multiple Person Disorder. | 1.3900 | 0.03827 | 300 | 213 | 57 | 30 |
442 | Does anyone have a less boring dream? | 1.3900 | 0.03678 | 300 | 208 | 67 | 25 |
443 | Describe your genitals. | 1.3900 | 0.04135 | 300 | 222 | 35 | 41 |
444 | The hourly rate applies to all of your personalities. | 1.3893 | 0.03989 | 298 | 217 | 46 | 35 |
445 | Of course this is confidential. | 1.3893 | 0.03507 | 298 | 201 | 78 | 19 |
446 | In 'Speed Analysis' you each have 30 seconds, then I decide ... two of you will be leaving, no charge ! | 1.3893 | 0.03571 | 298 | 203 | 74 | 21 |
447 | You do realize that a ménage à trois doesn't have to be this difficult. | 1.3893 | 0.04017 | 298 | 217 | 44 | 35 |
448 | This will only work if all of you have the exact same dream. | 1.3893 | 0.03903 | 298 | 214 | 52 | 32 |
449 | You are messed up on so many levels! | 1.3891 | 0.03580 | 293 | 199 | 74 | 20 |
450 | Yes, you could get coronavirus. | 1.3887 | 0.04069 | 301 | 223 | 39 | 39 |
451 | Here's yet another psychological theory that has never been debunked. | 1.3887 | 0.03699 | 301 | 210 | 65 | 26 |
452 | And you say they’re on top of you right now?! | 1.3885 | 0.03862 | 314 | 228 | 50 | 36 |
453 | I couldn't fit a sectional through the door. | 1.3878 | 0.03941 | 294 | 212 | 50 | 32 |
454 | It’s normal - many of my patients break into tiers. | 1.3878 | 0.03821 | 294 | 208 | 58 | 28 |
455 | It is often beneficial to have all your alter egos at the same session. In your case, the three dome is highly therapeutic. | 1.3878 | 0.04142 | 294 | 219 | 36 | 39 |
456 | I would worry less about who's higher up and more about how they're going to get down. | 1.3878 | 0.03666 | 294 | 203 | 68 | 23 |
457 | At this rate, I’ll pay off my student loans in 3030. | 1.3878 | 0.03821 | 294 | 208 | 58 | 28 |
458 | So, Gretchen, let’s start with your fear of heights. | 1.3878 | 0.03369 | 294 | 194 | 86 | 14 |
459 | I take doctor-patient-patient-patient confidentiality very seriously. | 1.3876 | 0.03908 | 258 | 178 | 60 | 20 |
460 | My analysis suggests you are suffering from trizophrenia”. | 1.3862 | 0.04098 | 290 | 214 | 40 | 36 |
461 | Tell me more about your Groupon regret. | 1.3862 | 0.04039 | 290 | 212 | 44 | 34 |
462 | I want you all to level with me ... | 1.3854 | 0.03685 | 288 | 199 | 67 | 22 |
463 | This is not the first time I’ve counseled love triangles. | 1.3854 | 0.03717 | 288 | 199 | 65 | 23 |
464 | As you might have guessed, I've treated love triangles before. | 1.3854 | 0.03585 | 288 | 196 | 73 | 19 |
465 | The University will no longer allow our students to "fall through the cracks." Each of you has been diagnosed with underachievement syndrome. | 1.3854 | 0.04177 | 288 | 215 | 35 | 38 |
466 | You are all special. Just not unique. | 1.3854 | 0.03685 | 288 | 199 | 67 | 22 |
467 | This week, we're going to try Freud's lesser known technique: Bunk-Bed Psychoanalysis. | 1.3854 | 0.04206 | 288 | 216 | 33 | 39 |
468 | Why did you choose the top bunk if you’re afraid of heights? | 1.3854 | 0.04089 | 288 | 212 | 41 | 35 |
469 | I realize you prefer psychoanalysis, but cognitive behavioral therapy in chairs would free up space. | 1.3854 | 0.04089 | 288 | 212 | 41 | 35 |
470 | Mother blames father for not spending enough time at home, father blames mother because he's not getting enough, and son ends up hating them both. So we have a dysfunctional family unit. Are all of you cool with that | 1.3854 | 0.04000 | 288 | 209 | 47 | 32 |
471 | OK, now change places | 1.3854 | 0.03969 | 288 | 208 | 49 | 31 |
472 | I assure you, I feel just as bad as you do about the cut in admissions to clinical psychology. | 1.3846 | 0.04110 | 286 | 211 | 40 | 35 |
473 | Your insurance company has capped the number of appointments it covers, but not the number of patients. | 1.3846 | 0.03567 | 286 | 194 | 74 | 18 |
474 | The point is it’s not how others see you, it’s how you see yourself”. | 1.3846 | 0.04110 | 286 | 210 | 40 | 35 |
475 | Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh | 1.3844 | 0.03663 | 294 | 204 | 67 | 23 |
476 | I'm happy you've decided to take advantage of my 3 for 1 groupon deal. | 1.3844 | 0.03694 | 294 | 205 | 65 | 24 |
477 | Anyone can do couples therapy | 1.3841 | 0.03575 | 289 | 197 | 73 | 19 |
478 | Please, one at a time! This is not the democratic presidential debate. | 1.3825 | 0.03871 | 285 | 203 | 55 | 27 |
479 | The Groupon is only for the first session. | 1.3825 | 0.03742 | 285 | 199 | 63 | 23 |
480 | When did you first suspect the triplets thing was a hoax and that she's not your birth mothers? | 1.3818 | 0.04104 | 275 | 201 | 43 | 31 |
481 | What did you expect for $50 an hour? | 1.3816 | 0.03922 | 283 | 202 | 52 | 28 |
482 | I call it "Groupon Therapy." | 1.3816 | 0.03759 | 283 | 198 | 62 | 23 |
483 | I charge by the personality | 1.3816 | 0.03692 | 283 | 196 | 66 | 21 |
484 | We've been in tiers ever since coming to your office | 1.3813 | 0.03738 | 278 | 193 | 64 | 21 |
485 | So let me get this straight... you are each a figment of the others' imagination? | 1.3808 | 0.03777 | 281 | 196 | 60 | 23 |
486 | That's just how it is with insurance these days - and your problems are all basically the same anyway. | 1.3808 | 0.03709 | 281 | 195 | 65 | 21 |
487 | And as for you Mrs. Smith don’t for a minute think you’re above all this ! | 1.3808 | 0.04192 | 281 | 210 | 34 | 36 |
488 | When did your personal space and privacy issues begin? | 1.3808 | 0.03605 | 281 | 192 | 71 | 18 |
489 | From top to Bottom, #1,#2,#3. You are all free to contribute to the conversation if inclined. | 1.3808 | 0.04131 | 281 | 207 | 39 | 34 |
490 | So, what exactly did D'Artagnan do this time? | 1.3808 | 0.04100 | 281 | 207 | 41 | 33 |
491 | You all experienced a trauma involving a duck and an apricot. So this just seems easier. | 1.3804 | 0.04026 | 276 | 200 | 47 | 29 |
492 | Until we have Medicare for All, this is the way it’s gonna be! | 1.3803 | 0.03648 | 284 | 196 | 68 | 20 |
493 | So tell me, what makes you believe, that one of you is adopted? | 1.3799 | 0.03622 | 279 | 191 | 70 | 18 |
494 | Let's start with the fact that you're all obviously lying." | 1.3799 | 0.03896 | 279 | 199 | 54 | 26 |
495 | With this President, we just can no longer keep up. | 1.3799 | 0.04026 | 279 | 203 | 46 | 30 |
496 | And how do you feel your bed wetting has effected the people around you? | 1.3799 | 0.03829 | 279 | 197 | 58 | 24 |
497 | We're calling it 'threeapy'. | 1.3799 | 0.03692 | 279 | 193 | 66 | 20 |
498 | Okay, now let me get this straight. It's Id, Ego, and Super-ego. Which of you is which? | 1.3799 | 0.04121 | 279 | 206 | 40 | 33 |
499 | This is what happens in a love triangle... | 1.3799 | 0.03761 | 279 | 195 | 62 | 22 |
500 | I have treated people with multiple personalities before, but this is a first for me: Treating three people who share a single personality. | 1.3799 | 0.03829 | 279 | 197 | 58 | 24 |
501 | There's really nothing to this "middle child sydrome." | 1.3799 | 0.04152 | 279 | 205 | 38 | 34 |
502 | At least two of you are delusional. | 1.3796 | 0.05687 | 137 | 99 | 24 | 14 |
503 | I'm sorry for the overbooking but Trump Derangement Syndrome is reaching epidemic proportions! | 1.3791 | 0.03949 | 277 | 199 | 51 | 27 |
504 | Fine, I guess I should have gone into more detail about the kind of three-way I had in mind. | 1.3791 | 0.03779 | 277 | 194 | 61 | 22 |
505 | Do you all have a buzzer? | 1.3791 | 0.04111 | 277 | 204 | 41 | 32 |
506 | You all seem to be suffering from single personality disorder. | 1.3791 | 0.04079 | 277 | 203 | 43 | 31 |
507 | Well Harry, I see you've brought all of your personalities with you today. | 1.3791 | 0.03848 | 277 | 196 | 57 | 24 |
508 | Will this be on one or separate checks? | 1.3791 | 0.03982 | 277 | 200 | 49 | 28 |
509 | It's down to you three finalists. Now let's see who has the most interesting relationship with their mother. | 1.3791 | 0.03674 | 277 | 191 | 67 | 19 |
510 | First off, thank you for taking advantage of my Groupon offer. | 1.3791 | 0.03915 | 277 | 198 | 53 | 26 |
511 | Let’s take it from the top so we can get to the bottom of this. | 1.3782 | 0.03655 | 275 | 189 | 68 | 18 |
512 | And how did that make you, you, and you feel? | 1.3782 | 0.03798 | 275 | 193 | 60 | 22 |
513 | Now how does that make you, you, and you feel? | 1.3782 | 0.03867 | 275 | 195 | 56 | 24 |
514 | I feel like I'm competing for your attention. | 1.3782 | 0.04132 | 275 | 203 | 40 | 32 |
515 | Do you ever have feelings of loneliness? | 1.3782 | 0.04228 | 275 | 206 | 34 | 35 |
516 | You clearly have multiple personalities. | 1.3782 | 0.04196 | 275 | 205 | 36 | 34 |
517 | My practice is vertically integrated. | 1.3782 | 0.04002 | 275 | 199 | 48 | 28 |
518 | the university said it was a free counseling session, not private. | 1.3782 | 0.03655 | 275 | 189 | 68 | 18 |
519 | After a couple sessions, most people are completely comfortable with group therapy. | 1.3782 | 0.04002 | 275 | 199 | 48 | 28 |
520 | Thank you all for trying out my ‘TherapyPool’ session | 1.3782 | 0.04164 | 275 | 204 | 38 | 33 |
521 | Today let's begin with the issue of why Linda always gets the top bunk. | 1.3782 | 0.03619 | 275 | 188 | 70 | 17 |
522 | So who is writing the check this week? | 1.3782 | 0.04164 | 275 | 204 | 38 | 33 |
523 | Tell me about your struggles to fit in. | 1.3782 | 0.04164 | 275 | 204 | 38 | 33 |
524 | Complete this sentence: My mother ... | 1.3782 | 0.04164 | 275 | 203 | 38 | 33 |
525 | The middle berth is giving birth for the other berths? | 1.3782 | 0.04259 | 275 | 207 | 32 | 36 |
526 | Did you say "polyhumorous"? | 1.3782 | 0.04068 | 275 | 201 | 44 | 30 |
527 | Volume discount? Yes. | 1.3773 | 0.03635 | 273 | 187 | 69 | 17 |
528 | This new group therapy model takes the shared economy to new heights. | 1.3773 | 0.04218 | 273 | 204 | 35 | 34 |
529 | It’s all your mother’s fault. | 1.3773 | 0.03816 | 273 | 192 | 59 | 22 |
530 | Thank you for sharing that, Sarah. Now, let’s hear what your other personalities want to say about your mother. | 1.3773 | 0.03886 | 273 | 194 | 55 | 23 |
531 | Welcome to 2020 couples therapy. They, you can start. | 1.3769 | 0.03829 | 268 | 188 | 59 | 21 |
532 | Welcome to Medicare for all!! | 1.3764 | 0.03906 | 271 | 193 | 54 | 24 |
533 | This is the only therapy your insurance covers- top bunk you’re first. | 1.3764 | 0.04077 | 271 | 197 | 44 | 29 |
534 | I'm hungry for a bacon. lettuce and tomato sandwich. | 1.3764 | 0.04241 | 271 | 203 | 34 | 34 |
535 | OK Who farted? | 1.3764 | 0.04110 | 271 | 199 | 42 | 30 |
536 | Congrats on signing up for Counseling with The Costco App. | 1.3764 | 0.03690 | 271 | 187 | 66 | 18 |
537 | I’m happy we have last weeks finalists all together. A recount of the votes shouldn’t take too much longer. | 1.3764 | 0.04209 | 271 | 202 | 36 | 33 |
538 | Don't be embarrassed, I am seeing more and more cases of Tiny Home Syndrome. | 1.3764 | 0.03975 | 271 | 195 | 50 | 26 |
539 | Oh, don't worry about that. Everything we discuss remains confidential. | 1.3764 | 0.03615 | 271 | 185 | 70 | 16 |
540 | Yeah, I see your point. Sitting in a circle is the way to go. | 1.3764 | 0.03799 | 271 | 190 | 60 | 21 |
541 | They want me to get more billable hours. | 1.3764 | 0.04043 | 271 | 197 | 46 | 28 |
542 | Remind me which of you has anxiety induced bed wetting ? | 1.3755 | 0.03960 | 269 | 193 | 51 | 25 |
543 | Now, who has the bed-wetting problem? | 1.3755 | 0.03890 | 269 | 194 | 50 | 24 |
544 | Mr. Simmons. Would you say you feel under your boss? | 1.3755 | 0.04198 | 269 | 199 | 37 | 32 |
545 | Obviously, we'll start with the middle child. | 1.3755 | 0.03632 | 269 | 184 | 69 | 16 |
546 | This is a three tiered question.. | 1.3755 | 0.03890 | 269 | 191 | 55 | 23 |
547 | Yes, I'm a shrink and also an AirB&B hostess. | 1.3755 | 0.04030 | 269 | 195 | 47 | 27 |
548 | Might it be that you haven't moved on from college? | 1.3755 | 0.03593 | 269 | 183 | 71 | 15 |
549 | Okay, in our last session one of you passed me a note complaining about minorities and women always getting higher positions than they deserve. Let's explore that. | 1.3755 | 0.03854 | 269 | 190 | 57 | 22 |
550 | I think you're problems are a lot of bunk! | 1.3750 | 0.05764 | 128 | 92 | 24 | 12 |
551 | Okay, now we're all settled, welcome to sibling therapy | 1.3745 | 0.03837 | 267 | 188 | 58 | 21 |
552 | You are here because you've been caught lying. | 1.3745 | 0.04016 | 267 | 193 | 48 | 26 |
553 | So Tommy, you're upset your parents are fighting. Karen, you're worried your son is acting out in school, and Greg, you're worried about the structural integrity of this triple couch? | 1.3745 | 0.03531 | 267 | 180 | 74 | 13 |
554 | Gee Bernie, this Medicare for all isn't exactly what I had in mind. | 1.3745 | 0.04120 | 267 | 196 | 42 | 29 |
555 | Tell me Karen, how does being on top finally feel?” | 1.3745 | 0.03837 | 267 | 188 | 58 | 21 |
556 | It appears this pecking order is headed by the queen. | 1.3745 | 0.04120 | 267 | 196 | 42 | 29 |
557 | How do you think I stack up as a therapist? | 1.3740 | 0.03773 | 262 | 182 | 62 | 18 |
558 | Welcome to Group Therapy For Introverts. | 1.3736 | 0.04142 | 265 | 194 | 41 | 29 |
559 | OK, listen—if this is going to work, you each need to quit offering advice to the others! | 1.3736 | 0.03705 | 265 | 183 | 65 | 17 |
560 | I can see you're familiar with Maslow's hierarchy of couches. | 1.3736 | 0.03929 | 265 | 189 | 53 | 23 |
561 | This is the only way I can make ends meet on the hourly rate your insurance is willing to pay. | 1.3736 | 0.03819 | 265 | 192 | 50 | 23 |
562 | I understand you're hearing voices. | 1.3736 | 0.03705 | 265 | 192 | 52 | 20 |
563 | Before we begin, Who is rock, who is paper and who is scissors? | 1.3736 | 0.04142 | 265 | 195 | 41 | 29 |
564 | Thanks for asking—I used to be a couples' therapist, but I've recently been promoted. | 1.3736 | 0.03856 | 265 | 187 | 57 | 21 |
565 | And how does it feel, hating each other's mothers? | 1.3736 | 0.03781 | 265 | 185 | 61 | 19 |
566 | I know sometimes people can feel uncomfortable with group therapy, but trust me, it can really help. | 1.3736 | 0.04311 | 265 | 200 | 31 | 34 |
567 | Helen, are you always on top? | 1.3726 | 0.04233 | 263 | 196 | 36 | 31 |
568 | You may want to consider transferring to a less hostel work environment. | 1.3726 | 0.03986 | 263 | 189 | 50 | 24 |
569 | Ego, Superego, that question was actually meant for Id. | 1.3726 | 0.03683 | 263 | 181 | 66 | 16 |
570 | Why do you feel our time together is all bunk? | 1.3726 | 0.03722 | 263 | 182 | 64 | 17 |
571 | Karen, in our previous session you mentioned that you always feel overshadowed in your marriage. So I thought it might help today to start with you on top of John and Bill. | 1.3726 | 0.04164 | 263 | 194 | 40 | 29 |
572 | So, is it true you all became depressed at the same time, Peter, Paul and Mary? | 1.3726 | 0.03875 | 263 | 186 | 56 | 21 |
573 | So, claustrophobia, an inferiority complex and a fear of heights... Do you think you could rearrange yourselves so I can remember who's who? | 1.3716 | 0.03538 | 261 | 176 | 73 | 12 |
574 | You wanted universal health care; you got universal health care! | 1.3716 | 0.04151 | 261 | 192 | 41 | 28 |
575 | Welcome to court mandated therapy. Unfortunately we are experiencing budget cuts. | 1.3707 | 0.03838 | 259 | 182 | 58 | 19 |
576 | Welcome to HMO health insurance. | 1.3696 | 0.04012 | 257 | 185 | 49 | 23 |
577 | So, Carolyn, how does it feel to finally be able to talk over men? | 1.3696 | 0.03818 | 257 | 180 | 59 | 18 |
578 | So who here has the inferiority complex? | 1.3696 | 0.04087 | 257 | 187 | 45 | 25 |
579 | So you're having trouble sleeping? | 1.3696 | 0.04160 | 257 | 189 | 41 | 27 |
580 | On a scale of 1-to-3, how would you rate your fear of bed wetting. | 1.3696 | 0.04339 | 257 | 193 | 31 | 32 |
581 | I think you might have codependency issues. | 1.3696 | 0.03485 | 257 | 178 | 67 | 12 |
582 | Polygamy can cause many issues with communicating in a relationship. | 1.3696 | 0.04269 | 257 | 192 | 35 | 30 |
583 | I know this isn't ideal, but it's all your HMOs will cover. | 1.3696 | 0.03818 | 257 | 180 | 59 | 18 |
584 | It appears to be a classic case of MPR..Multiple Personality Reversal | 1.3686 | 0.04399 | 255 | 194 | 28 | 33 |
585 | Triage Done. No Small Talk. | 1.3686 | 0.04257 | 255 | 190 | 36 | 29 |
586 | No, I can’t | 1.3686 | 0.04364 | 255 | 193 | 30 | 32 |
587 | You’re just plain nuts, nuts, nuts. | 1.3686 | 0.04071 | 255 | 185 | 46 | 24 |
588 | For any of you, how long have you felt "not special"? | 1.3686 | 0.03755 | 255 | 177 | 62 | 16 |
589 | Insurance only pays a third of my fee | 1.3686 | 0.04220 | 255 | 189 | 38 | 28 |
590 | You all seem to feel nobody treats you as an individual. | 1.3686 | 0.03877 | 255 | 180 | 56 | 19 |
591 | This looks like a case of stack home syndrome. | 1.3686 | 0.04328 | 255 | 192 | 32 | 31 |
592 | Sorry, I overbooked. How does that make you feel? | 1.3686 | 0.03877 | 255 | 180 | 56 | 19 |
593 | Maybe I could have been clearer about our three for one special offer. | 1.3686 | 0.03995 | 255 | 181 | 50 | 22 |
594 | Numbers one through three, when did you first start to feel like you're not special? | 1.3686 | 0.03755 | 255 | 177 | 62 | 16 |
595 | Why do you feel that you are always competing for attention? | 1.3686 | 0.04033 | 255 | 184 | 48 | 23 |
596 | I got this idea from some pirates I met on the subway. | 1.3676 | 0.04317 | 253 | 190 | 33 | 30 |
597 | Psychoanalysis can work on multiple levels. | 1.3676 | 0.03647 | 253 | 173 | 67 | 13 |
598 | This works out even better when you use Uber Pool. | 1.3676 | 0.04389 | 253 | 192 | 29 | 32 |
599 | I wasn’t quite sure which one of you said you hated your mother. I’ll just indicate in my notes that all 3 of you feel the same way, ok? | 1.3676 | 0.04244 | 253 | 188 | 37 | 28 |
600 | For an additional fee you can have more legroom. | 1.3672 | 0.03825 | 256 | 178 | 57 | 17 |
601 | You don't get to vote. It's my thermostat. | 1.3665 | 0.03958 | 251 | 179 | 52 | 20 |
602 | hey hey hey | 1.3665 | 0.04556 | 251 | 195 | 20 | 36 |
603 | What’s your first memory of Groupon? | 1.3665 | 0.04268 | 251 | 187 | 36 | 28 |
604 | Coulda, shoulda, woulda: Next! | 1.3665 | 0.03917 | 251 | 178 | 54 | 19 |
605 | It appears there are numerous layers to the issue. | 1.3665 | 0.03751 | 251 | 174 | 62 | 15 |
606 | Okay so you’ve all had the same parents—— And? | 1.3665 | 0.04230 | 251 | 186 | 38 | 27 |
607 | Corporate pressures. I'm sure you'll understand. | 1.3665 | 0.04305 | 251 | 186 | 33 | 29 |
608 | And you’re sure the voices you’re hearing aren’t each other’s? | 1.3665 | 0.03917 | 251 | 178 | 54 | 19 |
609 | Who wants to start us off? Id? Ego? Super Ego? | 1.3661 | 0.03844 | 254 | 179 | 57 | 18 |
610 | Doc, I’m trying to be open minded but this seems like a lot of bunk. | 1.3661 | 0.03924 | 254 | 181 | 53 | 20 |
611 | Alright then, Bachelor # 3... | 1.3661 | 0.04192 | 254 | 188 | 39 | 27 |
612 | …but on the street it's known as Maslow's bunk bed of therapy. | 1.3661 | 0.04374 | 254 | 193 | 29 | 32 |
613 | Why? the landlord just tripled my rent. | 1.3661 | 0.03844 | 254 | 179 | 57 | 18 |
614 | Three Musketeers Disorder” is pretty rare, but I think I can help you. | 1.3655 | 0.03978 | 249 | 178 | 51 | 19 |
615 | When did the "ménage à trois" start to feel like a "je ne sais quoi" ? | 1.3655 | 0.03812 | 249 | 174 | 59 | 16 |
616 | Now, feel free to comment on each other's problems. It's called collaborative-scaffolding. I find that it triples my profits while freeing me up to do my grocery list. | 1.3655 | 0.03978 | 249 | 178 | 51 | 20 |
617 | trickle-down psychoanalysis | 1.3655 | 0.03854 | 249 | 175 | 57 | 17 |
618 | so, why DO the two of you keep calling her Shemp? | 1.3651 | 0.04399 | 252 | 192 | 28 | 32 |
619 | And Jane, How do you feel Darrell feels about what Scott says he’s feeling? | 1.3644 | 0.03701 | 247 | 170 | 64 | 13 |
620 | Go on, this is just between you and me and him and her | 1.3644 | 0.03832 | 247 | 173 | 58 | 16 |
621 | Let's start at the bottom and work our way up. | 1.3644 | 0.03958 | 247 | 176 | 52 | 19 |
622 | Your childhood sounds rough, but your mother is getting a great deal on this. | 1.3644 | 0.03917 | 247 | 175 | 54 | 18 |
623 | I’m afraid that you face very real dangers if we debunk Freud’s theories | 1.3644 | 0.04278 | 247 | 184 | 36 | 27 |
624 | Your problems are not unique. | 1.3644 | 0.03832 | 247 | 173 | 58 | 15 |
625 | Between the budget cuts and the lip service we give to inclusive excellence, this is how it's going to be. Get used to it. | 1.3644 | 0.04392 | 247 | 187 | 30 | 30 |
626 | I understand the three of you have some unresolved summer camp issues. | 1.3636 | 0.03928 | 242 | 171 | 54 | 17 |
627 | Honestly, George, I don’t know why you threw paper. | 1.3633 | 0.04418 | 245 | 186 | 29 | 30 |
628 | I'm going to have to ask the Id to stop impulsively answering all my questions and allow the Ego and Super-ego a chance to speak. | 1.3633 | 0.03979 | 245 | 175 | 51 | 19 |
629 | Get to the point, guys, Three-for-One-Thursday ends in three minutes. | 1.3633 | 0.04303 | 245 | 183 | 35 | 27 |
630 | My specialty is menage a trois. | 1.3633 | 0.04144 | 245 | 179 | 43 | 23 |
631 | Interesting, you all subscribe to The New Yorker. | 1.3633 | 0.04021 | 245 | 176 | 49 | 20 |
632 | No...no discounts, unless you all have the same neuroses! | 1.3621 | 0.04085 | 243 | 175 | 46 | 21 |
633 | What do you mean when you say you feel like your parents are always hovering over you? | 1.3621 | 0.04043 | 243 | 175 | 48 | 20 |
634 | Let’s get started on our first Medicare For All session | 1.3621 | 0.03958 | 243 | 175 | 49 | 19 |
635 | What makes you think you don't stack up? | 1.3621 | 0.03871 | 243 | 171 | 56 | 16 |
636 | All of you are telling me a lot of bunk. | 1.3621 | 0.04288 | 243 | 181 | 36 | 26 |
637 | Top bunk, you go first- What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done? | 1.3621 | 0.04248 | 243 | 180 | 38 | 25 |
638 | ‘First, I apologize. I’ll shut down my Groupon offer tomorrow." | 1.3610 | 0.04023 | 241 | 173 | 49 | 19 |
639 | Dr. Schneider's airbnb had certain drawbacks. | 1.3610 | 0.04108 | 241 | 175 | 45 | 21 |
640 | Welcome to your Groupon session. | 1.3610 | 0.03892 | 241 | 170 | 55 | 16 |
641 | Today, let’s work on your multiple personalities disorder. | 1.3610 | 0.04023 | 241 | 173 | 49 | 19 |
642 | Your problems are stacking up aren't they ? | 1.3610 | 0.03847 | 241 | 169 | 57 | 15 |
643 | Okay, who's the id this time? | 1.3610 | 0.03802 | 241 | 168 | 59 | 14 |
644 | One of you has a fear of the unknown. | 1.3610 | 0.04353 | 241 | 181 | 33 | 27 |
645 | Let me explain how the group discount works. | 1.3598 | 0.03681 | 239 | 164 | 64 | 11 |
646 | Alright then, who wants to go first? | 1.3598 | 0.04536 | 239 | 184 | 24 | 31 |
647 | The other two are from Airbnb. | 1.3598 | 0.03912 | 239 | 169 | 54 | 16 |
648 | Bob and Ted; how does having the woman on top make you feel? First one to ring the buzzer! | 1.3598 | 0.04088 | 239 | 173 | 46 | 20 |
649 | No no, two claps are for Paul, not for you Janice - You're not above anyone else. | 1.3598 | 0.04379 | 239 | 178 | 32 | 27 |
650 | I think the three of you are taking much too literally your 1st grade promise to be “best friends forever”. | 1.3598 | 0.04088 | 239 | 173 | 46 | 20 |
651 | How connected do you feel to the people around you? | 1.3598 | 0.04045 | 239 | 172 | 48 | 19 |
652 | It's the new Medicare for all guidelines. | 1.3598 | 0.04298 | 239 | 178 | 36 | 25 |
653 | So, I see we're making progress on the separation anxiety. | 1.3598 | 0.03728 | 239 | 165 | 62 | 12 |
654 | Who is the manager of this trois ? | 1.3598 | 0.04419 | 239 | 181 | 30 | 28 |
655 | I apologize for the inconvenience but my insurance dictates that I see x number of patients per day. | 1.3598 | 0.04173 | 239 | 175 | 42 | 22 |
656 | Now, about this feeling that the odds are stacked against you... | 1.3598 | 0.04338 | 239 | 179 | 34 | 26 |
657 | When did you begin to suspect you had three personalities? | 1.3598 | 0.04298 | 239 | 178 | 36 | 25 |
658 | Do all three of you think you have intimacy issues? | 1.3598 | 0.04338 | 239 | 179 | 34 | 26 |
659 | Your first mother is free. There’s a $10 per hour charge for each stepmother. | 1.3598 | 0.04497 | 239 | 183 | 26 | 30 |
660 | Susan, tell us about your elevated sense of anxiety in this relationship. | 1.3598 | 0.04338 | 239 | 179 | 34 | 26 |
661 | I want you to relax, close your eyes, and think of your favorite character from Star Trek. | 1.3598 | 0.04458 | 239 | 182 | 28 | 29 |
662 | Tiered insurance. Wait your turn. | 1.3595 | 0.03834 | 242 | 170 | 57 | 15 |
663 | How often do these summer camp nightmares re-occur? | 1.3595 | 0.03834 | 242 | 170 | 57 | 15 |
664 | I don't think this group rate experiment is such a good idea. | 1.3595 | 0.04493 | 242 | 185 | 25 | 31 |
665 | Let me explain: like hot air, transference rises. | 1.3595 | 0.04337 | 242 | 182 | 33 | 27 |
666 | Get ready contestants, the next question is worth $5000! | 1.3595 | 0.04531 | 242 | 186 | 23 | 32 |
667 | When did you first begin to think there were three of you ? | 1.3595 | 0.03922 | 242 | 172 | 53 | 17 |
668 | Well this isn't how I usually treat Middle Child Syndrome, but Peter why don't you start by sharing your point of view. | 1.3595 | 0.04009 | 242 | 174 | 49 | 19 |
669 | My office is a safe place for tiers. | 1.3592 | 0.03889 | 245 | 174 | 54 | 17 |
670 | If one of you can come up with a better idea to reduce my student debt,I’m all ears. | 1.3586 | 0.04154 | 237 | 173 | 43 | 21 |
671 | Yes, it's your mother's fault. Next question? | 1.3586 | 0.04023 | 237 | 170 | 49 | 18 |
672 | Ok, which of you feels the most alone? | 1.3586 | 0.04525 | 237 | 181 | 25 | 30 |
673 | No, George, you are not back in basic training! | 1.3586 | 0.04445 | 237 | 179 | 28 | 28 |
674 | On a scale of 1 to 3...... | 1.3586 | 0.04067 | 237 | 171 | 47 | 19 |
675 | Now that you are in a deep sleep, repeat after me: " We are all individuals" | 1.3586 | 0.04445 | 237 | 180 | 28 | 28 |
676 | Yes, you will get the family discount. | 1.3586 | 0.03841 | 237 | 166 | 57 | 14 |
677 | Please relax and welcome to your High Anxiety, Mid-life Crisis, Low Self Esteem Therapy Group. | 1.3583 | 0.03899 | 240 | 170 | 54 | 16 |
678 | Actually, I'm more of a Jenga-ian. | 1.3574 | 0.04306 | 235 | 175 | 36 | 24 |
679 | I find it interesting that you all claim that you feel like you don’t “stack up.” | 1.3574 | 0.03954 | 235 | 167 | 52 | 15 |
680 | I am sure you now realize, you all qualified for the group rate. | 1.3574 | 0.03954 | 235 | 167 | 52 | 16 |
681 | On page 13, paragraph 5, it states your session can be hosted simultaneously. Now who wants to go first? | 1.3574 | 0.04472 | 235 | 179 | 28 | 28 |
682 | I'm glad I was able to squeeze you all in. | 1.3574 | 0.03766 | 235 | 163 | 60 | 12 |
683 | I'm sorry, but your health insurance will only pay for semi-private therapy. | 1.3574 | 0.04178 | 235 | 172 | 42 | 21 |
684 | Try to solve one problem and two more show up. | 1.3562 | 0.03929 | 233 | 165 | 53 | 15 |
685 | I’m sorry, but the ad did say Groupon counseling. | 1.3562 | 0.03929 | 233 | 165 | 53 | 15 |
686 | So we're trying this new form of more comfortable group therapy. | 1.3537 | 0.04384 | 229 | 171 | 33 | 24 |
687 | I'm glad I could slot you all in this afternoon. | 1.3537 | 0.03874 | 229 | 161 | 55 | 13 |
688 | O.K. Subject. Mother always liked me best. Go! | 1.3537 | 0.03824 | 229 | 160 | 57 | 12 |
689 | Please state your names | 1.3537 | 0.04384 | 229 | 172 | 33 | 24 |
690 | Billy, your parents say you don't understand them and they want be treated like grown ups. | 1.3537 | 0.04340 | 229 | 171 | 35 | 23 |
691 | He did say he was going to go above and beyond in 2020 | 1.3524 | 0.04626 | 227 | 175 | 22 | 29 |
692 | I don’t think he liked it when we called him Mickey. | 1.3524 | 0.04584 | 227 | 175 | 24 | 28 |
693 | Please, no more interruptions or double talk. | 1.3524 | 0.04584 | 227 | 175 | 24 | 28 |
694 | It's what the insurance company approved. | 1.3524 | 0.03944 | 227 | 161 | 52 | 14 |
695 | It's hard being the middle child. | 1.3524 | 0.03894 | 227 | 160 | 54 | 13 |
696 | Which one of you just whispered "psychology is a lot of bunk?" | 1.3524 | 0.03844 | 227 | 162 | 49 | 14 |
697 | Just know you're not alone. | 1.3524 | 0.03844 | 227 | 159 | 56 | 12 |
698 | Let's address this love triangle once and for all. | 1.3524 | 0.03793 | 227 | 158 | 58 | 11 |
699 | Number 2, how do feel about what number 1 said about number 3? | 1.3524 | 0.04137 | 227 | 165 | 44 | 18 |
700 | Crap! Only 33% this time | 1.3524 | 0.04584 | 227 | 175 | 24 | 28 |
701 | So you all have triplet telepathy? Who's the bitch with the problem? | 1.3524 | 0.04668 | 227 | 176 | 20 | 30 |
702 | How long have you felt you were one person? | 1.3524 | 0.03741 | 227 | 157 | 60 | 10 |
703 | Hoe long have you experienced this inferiority triplex? | 1.3524 | 0.04626 | 227 | 176 | 22 | 29 |
704 | Yes, Perhaps, No. | 1.3524 | 0.03993 | 227 | 162 | 50 | 15 |
705 | Yes, our office manager uses a computer, but I will still be billing you in triplicate. | 1.3524 | 0.04541 | 227 | 174 | 26 | 27 |
706 | ...and Lucy, how do you feel about Paul’s mother? | 1.3524 | 0.04137 | 227 | 165 | 44 | 18 |
707 | Welcome to Psychoanalysis For All brought to you by Medicare For All. | 1.3524 | 0.03993 | 227 | 162 | 50 | 15 |
708 | Which of you gets the gestalt in this grouping? | 1.3524 | 0.04411 | 227 | 171 | 32 | 24 |
709 | All of you are here because you don't know why you have a penis. | 1.3524 | 0.04626 | 227 | 176 | 22 | 29 |
710 | If you think they care what you're saying, you really shouldn't be in the narcissist's group session. | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
711 | Let me start by debunking some misconceptions about group therapy. | 1.3511 | 0.03813 | 225 | 157 | 57 | 11 |
712 | Would anyone like refreshments? Buy three and get one free! | 1.3511 | 0.04656 | 225 | 175 | 21 | 29 |
713 | Please just take turns talking. Your managed care company only allows you ten minutes each. | 1.3511 | 0.04438 | 225 | 169 | 30 | 24 |
714 | I’m going to need a bigger notebook. | 1.3511 | 0.03813 | 225 | 157 | 57 | 11 |
715 | I'm afraid our times are about up. | 1.3511 | 0.03760 | 225 | 162 | 49 | 13 |
716 | Your therapy share discount will be applied on each session | 1.3511 | 0.04348 | 225 | 168 | 35 | 22 |
717 | I wonder whether it's professionally acceptable to use mass production outside Massachusetts? | 1.3511 | 0.04482 | 225 | 171 | 29 | 25 |
718 | Boys and girls, welcome to the GOP’s version of bunkbed psychiatry. | 1.3511 | 0.04613 | 225 | 174 | 23 | 28 |
719 | Bunk beds were on closeout. | 1.3511 | 0.04526 | 225 | 172 | 27 | 26 |
720 | Number 2, where would you take your psychiatrist for a once-in-a-lifetime trip? | 1.3511 | 0.04065 | 225 | 162 | 47 | 16 |
721 | I’m sorry but one of you should be Asian or Hispanic. | 1.3511 | 0.03543 | 225 | 163 | 51 | 11 |
722 | I think you misunderstood what 'co-pay' means. | 1.3511 | 0.04208 | 225 | 165 | 41 | 19 |
723 | whose turn | 1.3511 | 0.04526 | 225 | 172 | 27 | 26 |
724 | Welcome to our new Identity Psychiatry program. | 1.3511 | 0.04613 | 225 | 173 | 23 | 28 |
725 | I'm all for the economy and efficiency of group therapy, but perhaps it's not a good fit for such diversity. | 1.3511 | 0.04526 | 225 | 172 | 27 | 26 |
726 | I only want to hear from the middle child. | 1.3511 | 0.03813 | 225 | 157 | 57 | 11 |
727 | Today we will try to debunk some myths about group therapy. | 1.3511 | 0.04015 | 225 | 161 | 49 | 15 |
728 | Is anyone not part of Acme Discount Insurance? | 1.3511 | 0.04526 | 225 | 172 | 27 | 26 |
729 | These multi personality psychoanalysis sessions are getting harder and harder these days. | 1.3511 | 0.04526 | 225 | 171 | 27 | 26 |
730 | Let's start from the top so we can get to the bottom of this. | 1.3500 | 0.04076 | 220 | 158 | 47 | 15 |
731 | I'm sorry but I cannot accommodate a ménage á quatre. | 1.3498 | 0.04686 | 223 | 173 | 20 | 29 |
732 | Interesting. John, how does that make Karen feel? | 1.3498 | 0.03833 | 223 | 161 | 47 | 13 |
733 | My professional diagnosis is high anxiety, claustrophobia, and low self esteem | 1.3498 | 0.03885 | 223 | 157 | 54 | 12 |
734 | This is the Iowa Caucus it doesn’t have to be this difficult. | 1.3498 | 0.04643 | 223 | 173 | 22 | 28 |
735 | Managed Care | 1.3498 | 0.04420 | 223 | 168 | 32 | 23 |
736 | Assessment: ? Attachment Disorder? | 1.3498 | 0.04599 | 223 | 171 | 24 | 27 |
737 | Potential Client #2, do you have any traumatic childhood memories? | 1.3498 | 0.04643 | 223 | 173 | 22 | 28 |
738 | And I thought couples therapy was difficult... | 1.3498 | 0.04038 | 223 | 160 | 48 | 15 |
739 | You could make millions of dollars! Wait, forget i said that. Just,um,leave it here and don't tell anyone about it. | 1.3498 | 0.04686 | 223 | 174 | 20 | 29 |
740 | Man, this study is a great way to catch up on my sleep | 1.3498 | 0.04510 | 223 | 170 | 28 | 24 |
741 | Always remember, you're a unique, wonderful person. Each one of you. | 1.3498 | 0.04088 | 223 | 160 | 46 | 16 |
742 | Let's focus on hierarchical issues today. | 1.3498 | 0.03833 | 223 | 156 | 56 | 11 |
743 | This is a classic example of Middle Child Syndrome. | 1.3486 | 0.03888 | 218 | 153 | 54 | 11 |
744 | Separate checks? | 1.3486 | 0.03833 | 218 | 152 | 56 | 10 |
745 | What was there about Medicare for all that you didn't understand? | 1.3486 | 0.04048 | 218 | 156 | 48 | 14 |
746 | Bob finally got his wish of having a threesome. | 1.3486 | 0.04251 | 218 | 160 | 40 | 18 |
747 | So when did you first notice you had multiple personalities? | 1.3486 | 0.04446 | 218 | 164 | 32 | 22 |
748 | I hear you. I hear you. I hear you. | 1.3486 | 0.03995 | 218 | 155 | 50 | 13 |
749 | And how did that make you ALL feel? | 1.3486 | 0.03995 | 218 | 155 | 50 | 13 |
750 | This raises "split personality" to a whole new level. | 1.3486 | 0.03300 | 218 | 154 | 54 | 7 |
751 | Is this going to be one bill, or separate checks? | 1.3486 | 0.03995 | 218 | 155 | 50 | 13 |
752 | Don't tell me--your mothers said you were special. | 1.3486 | 0.04493 | 218 | 165 | 30 | 23 |
753 | You are hearing voices? Good! We are finally making some progress. | 1.3484 | 0.03906 | 221 | 156 | 53 | 12 |
754 | So, one of you is just the, Lyft driver? | 1.3484 | 0.04111 | 221 | 160 | 45 | 16 |
755 | Focus on yourself | 1.3484 | 0.03958 | 221 | 157 | 51 | 13 |
756 | Please think quietly about your problems, and then I'll prescribe everyone antidepressants. | 1.3484 | 0.04010 | 221 | 158 | 49 | 14 |
757 | When I agreed to be your counselor, I wasn't aware you meant a camp counselor. | 1.3484 | 0.04010 | 221 | 158 | 49 | 14 |
758 | Play sick! | 1.3484 | 0.04629 | 221 | 171 | 23 | 27 |
759 | But what do you 'Polyamo-need'? | 1.3484 | 0.04629 | 221 | 171 | 23 | 27 |
760 | If you’re thinking ‘A- Maze-ing’, I’m not either. | 1.3472 | 0.04616 | 216 | 166 | 25 | 25 |
761 | I apologize for the typo. This was to be a group session for compulsive stalkers. | 1.3472 | 0.04522 | 216 | 164 | 29 | 23 |
762 | Oh, yes, it was mentioned at the bottom of the coupon. | 1.3472 | 0.04071 | 216 | 155 | 47 | 14 |
763 | Thank you all for participating in my volume discount plan. | 1.3472 | 0.03853 | 216 | 157 | 45 | 12 |
764 | Ok, starting at the top, tell me more about the issues you are having with socialized medicine. | 1.3472 | 0.03909 | 216 | 152 | 53 | 11 |
765 | A human centipede? Damn ... that's messed up. | 1.3470 | 0.04704 | 219 | 171 | 20 | 28 |
766 | Welcome to the bed wetting diversion therapy group. | 1.3470 | 0.04284 | 219 | 162 | 38 | 19 |
767 | Lugers take your mark. Now get set... | 1.3470 | 0.04704 | 219 | 170 | 20 | 28 |
768 | The whole family in tiers—I’m listening | 1.3470 | 0.03927 | 219 | 155 | 52 | 12 |
769 | On a scale of one to ten, how are you feeling today? I'd just like an average score for the three of you? | 1.3470 | 0.03927 | 219 | 155 | 52 | 12 |
770 | A democrat has a strong chance in 2020. You likely will not get coronavirus. However, your mom has a point and maybe you should sign up for JDate. | 1.3470 | 0.04381 | 219 | 164 | 34 | 21 |
771 | I know, we all want to be the Jonas Brothers. | 1.3470 | 0.04614 | 219 | 169 | 24 | 26 |
772 | I assure you this is entirely confidential | 1.3458 | 0.03930 | 214 | 151 | 52 | 11 |
773 | Mmm ... I never thought family therapy would give me company... | 1.3458 | 0.04599 | 214 | 164 | 26 | 24 |
774 | So let's see. Is this transition going upward or downward? | 1.3458 | 0.04599 | 214 | 164 | 26 | 24 |
775 | This week, I want us to talk about how the hell Kathy got up there without a ladder | 1.3458 | 0.04200 | 214 | 156 | 42 | 16 |
776 | Just remember, you're never alone with schizophrenia. | 1.3458 | 0.04303 | 214 | 158 | 38 | 18 |
777 | And you think psychoanalysis is a lot of bunk? | 1.3458 | 0.04040 | 214 | 153 | 48 | 13 |
778 | So, lets get started, and thank you for using Groupon. | 1.3458 | 0.04200 | 214 | 156 | 42 | 15 |
779 | In case you're wondering, this is my accelerated plan to retirement | 1.3458 | 0.04252 | 214 | 157 | 40 | 17 |
780 | It's cheaper and you can make new friends! | 1.3458 | 0.03874 | 214 | 150 | 54 | 10 |
781 | Your Highness,as you stroll through your kingdom,it might help if your subjects saw you wearing pants | 1.3458 | 0.04693 | 214 | 166 | 22 | 26 |
782 | Starting from the top, how does that make you feel? | 1.3458 | 0.04040 | 214 | 156 | 44 | 14 |
783 | I believe this has gone well beyond co-dependency. | 1.3458 | 0.04200 | 214 | 156 | 42 | 16 |
784 | I'll be honest, this is first time I've counseled a menage a trois | 1.3458 | 0.04303 | 214 | 158 | 38 | 18 |
785 | And how long have you had these three distinct personalities? | 1.3458 | 0.04404 | 214 | 160 | 34 | 20 |
786 | So, the problem seems to be one personality with multiple patients. | 1.3458 | 0.04252 | 214 | 157 | 40 | 17 |
787 | Are you sure you want to talk about your multiple personalities while they are here? | 1.3456 | 0.04210 | 217 | 159 | 41 | 17 |
788 | Yes, you can bunk on it. | 1.3443 | 0.04581 | 212 | 162 | 27 | 23 |
789 | So, you were saying you don't feel valued? | 1.3443 | 0.04225 | 212 | 155 | 41 | 16 |
790 | Would you say anything else if we were alone? | 1.3443 | 0.03952 | 212 | 150 | 51 | 11 |
791 | Weere all verrysad here xx today that1 | 1.3443 | 0.04819 | 212 | 167 | 17 | 28 |
792 | Your insurance only covers family therapy, so this is the model we have to use. One of you is the victim, one has to be co-dependant, and of course, it will all be the mother’s fault. | 1.3443 | 0.04225 | 212 | 155 | 41 | 16 |
793 | How thoughtful to bring your own couch | 1.3443 | 0.04381 | 212 | 158 | 35 | 19 |
794 | First there was Uber ride sharing, then therapist Groupons. What's next? | 1.3443 | 0.04482 | 212 | 159 | 31 | 21 |
795 | You think this is bad?? TrumpCare originally wrote off psychotherapy altogether | 1.3443 | 0.04172 | 212 | 154 | 43 | 15 |
796 | As your throuples therapist, let me say, "Welcome, welcome, welcome." | 1.3443 | 0.04172 | 212 | 154 | 43 | 15 |
797 | This idea came to me when I worked as a camp counselor during college. | 1.3443 | 0.04432 | 212 | 159 | 33 | 20 |
798 | Let's start with your mother. From top to bottom. | 1.3443 | 0.04225 | 212 | 155 | 41 | 16 |
799 | And now the same question to number 2 | 1.3443 | 0.04330 | 212 | 157 | 37 | 18 |
800 | ''One bill?" | 1.3443 | 0.04118 | 212 | 153 | 45 | 14 |
801 | Don't tell me, tell your HMO. | 1.3429 | 0.04031 | 210 | 150 | 48 | 12 |
802 | I think we'll first need to address the issue of boundaries. | 1.3429 | 0.03858 | 210 | 147 | 54 | 9 |
803 | Since you suffer from multiple personalities, I'll be billing you three times. | 1.3429 | 0.04660 | 210 | 160 | 24 | 24 |
804 | I've gathered you here because you've all dreamed of being human playing cards in a game of three-card monte. | 1.3413 | 0.04591 | 208 | 159 | 27 | 22 |
805 | Lets be clear- There is no buy two get one free for three therapy sessions at the same time. It wouldn't be professional ! | 1.3413 | 0.04741 | 208 | 160 | 21 | 25 |
806 | Let’s discuss feelings of inadequacy that arose after a seventy-eight-year-old white guy pushed you gay/black/female folks out of the running for the Democratic nomination. | 1.3413 | 0.04331 | 208 | 154 | 37 | 16 |
807 | Unfortunately, the decrease in Medicare reimbursement has forced me to rearrange my patient schedule | 1.3413 | 0.03878 | 208 | 146 | 53 | 9 |
808 | OK, so it’s a ménage a trois but you still get 3 separate bills. | 1.3413 | 0.04054 | 208 | 149 | 47 | 12 |
809 | No, I said you should all be on 'meds'. | 1.3413 | 0.04277 | 208 | 153 | 39 | 16 |
810 | When I suggested spending more time with friends, this is not exactly what I had in mind | 1.3412 | 0.04071 | 211 | 152 | 46 | 13 |
811 | Just remember that you're not alone. | 1.3399 | 0.04118 | 203 | 146 | 45 | 12 |
812 | Well, you begged me to squeeze you in today. | 1.3398 | 0.04192 | 206 | 150 | 42 | 14 |
813 | Mary, why do you feel that being part of a thruple means you have to do everything with Peter and Paul? | 1.3398 | 0.04019 | 206 | 147 | 48 | 11 |
814 | What's your problem? What's your problem? And what's your problem? | 1.3398 | 0.04358 | 206 | 153 | 36 | 17 |
815 | What will it be? One patient or twenty minutes each. | 1.3398 | 0.03899 | 206 | 145 | 52 | 9 |
816 | You have multiple personality disorder, but that's normal for multiple people. | 1.3398 | 0.04078 | 206 | 148 | 46 | 12 |
817 | Ok I’m gonna ask if any of you have been having suicidal thoughts, majority rules on this one. | 1.3398 | 0.04304 | 206 | 152 | 38 | 16 |
818 | Shoulda... coulda... woulda... Next!! | 1.3398 | 0.04192 | 206 | 150 | 42 | 14 |
819 | This one our last mouse, i hope it works this time! | 1.3397 | 0.04572 | 209 | 159 | 27 | 22 |
820 | Ground rule #1: Never debunk one another. | 1.3397 | 0.04419 | 209 | 157 | 33 | 19 |
821 | I know who farted, actually. | 1.3390 | 0.04449 | 177 | 128 | 38 | 11 |
822 | He already has @ name and trademark: the Ratjetpack | 1.3382 | 0.04756 | 204 | 159 | 21 | 24 |
823 | Just out of curiosity, how much does Costco charge you for these sessions? | 1.3382 | 0.04042 | 204 | 146 | 47 | 11 |
824 | No, I do not see your issues as a lot of bunk. | 1.3382 | 0.04218 | 204 | 149 | 41 | 14 |
825 | Welcome to the next meeting of Bed Wetters Anonymous. Ready to start? Who wants to go first? | 1.3382 | 0.04274 | 204 | 150 | 39 | 15 |
826 | Update on your insurance coverage. You each have twenty minutes, or sixty minutes talking at the same time. | 1.3382 | 0.04218 | 204 | 152 | 37 | 15 |
827 | This would be a lot easier if you had the same mother. | 1.3382 | 0.04274 | 204 | 150 | 39 | 15 |
828 | Of course we can afford medicare for all | 1.3382 | 0.04101 | 204 | 147 | 45 | 12 |
829 | The cost of office space has tripled, so this is my work around | 1.3382 | 0.04218 | 204 | 149 | 41 | 14 |
830 | Your insurance won't cover individual sessions. So, how does that make each of you feel. | 1.3382 | 0.04386 | 204 | 152 | 35 | 17 |
831 | I suspect multiple personality disorder. Which one of you has insurance? | 1.3382 | 0.04160 | 204 | 148 | 43 | 13 |
832 | Trust me, you will appreciate it more when my fee is split 3 ways. | 1.3382 | 0.04101 | 204 | 149 | 42 | 13 |
833 | HMO Psychoanalysis | 1.3382 | 0.04386 | 204 | 152 | 35 | 16 |
834 | You share the same psychosis, so why not? | 1.3382 | 0.04160 | 204 | 148 | 43 | 13 |
835 | You can each have an ego. It doesn't have to be just one of you. | 1.3382 | 0.04160 | 204 | 148 | 43 | 13 |
836 | No one loves you ...same problem you all three have... that’s why I gave you a discount ! | 1.3382 | 0.04331 | 204 | 151 | 37 | 16 |
837 | Kathleen, tell me, why do you feel that Doug and Brian are beneath you? | 1.3382 | 0.03921 | 204 | 144 | 51 | 9 |
838 | The group rate allows you to express your feelings in series or parallel. | 1.3382 | 0.04042 | 204 | 146 | 47 | 11 |
839 | So... you're all in a bit of a bunk? | 1.3382 | 0.04705 | 204 | 158 | 23 | 23 |
840 | This is my first polygamist marriage counseling session, so I've made some adjustments. | 1.3382 | 0.04331 | 204 | 151 | 37 | 16 |
841 | How about Cancun this year,Puerto Rico next year and Barbados to follow? | 1.3382 | 0.04601 | 204 | 156 | 27 | 21 |
842 | Well, you DID purchase your sessions through Groupon. | 1.3382 | 0.04101 | 204 | 147 | 45 | 12 |
843 | Who farted? | 1.3382 | 0.04499 | 207 | 157 | 30 | 20 |
844 | I am glad you all took on the 3 for 1 promotion. | 1.3366 | 0.04414 | 202 | 151 | 34 | 17 |
845 | I’ll cut my fees in three. | 1.3366 | 0.04789 | 202 | 158 | 20 | 24 |
846 | Have you considered switching Martha to the middle bunk to save your threesome? | 1.3366 | 0.04358 | 202 | 150 | 36 | 16 |
847 | Yes, last weeks finalists bad, but I don't think your captions are any funnier. | 1.3366 | 0.04632 | 202 | 155 | 26 | 21 |
848 | Your mother, huh? Let’s just start from the top. | 1.3366 | 0.04185 | 202 | 147 | 42 | 13 |
849 | I think you'll find the ad clearly stated three for the price of one | 1.3366 | 0.04185 | 202 | 147 | 42 | 13 |
850 | There's always a catch with a Groupon voucher. | 1.3366 | 0.04358 | 202 | 150 | 36 | 16 |
851 | I would love to help you all,but the odds are stacked against that. | 1.3366 | 0.04185 | 202 | 147 | 42 | 13 |
852 | Now, do you see how much you have in common? | 1.3366 | 0.03880 | 202 | 142 | 52 | 8 |
853 | I’ve decided to take group therapy to new heights. | 1.3366 | 0.04301 | 202 | 149 | 38 | 15 |
854 | I promised you'd start to see things from a new perspective. That'll be twelve-thousand dollars. | 1.3366 | 0.04414 | 202 | 151 | 34 | 17 |
855 | John dear, I think what you’re trying to communicate is that you “feel” as if your parents are on top of you. Is that correct? | 1.3366 | 0.04185 | 202 | 147 | 42 | 13 |
856 | Well, it looks like your three hours are up. | 1.3366 | 0.04243 | 202 | 148 | 40 | 14 |
857 | What we have here is failure to separate. | 1.3366 | 0.03942 | 202 | 143 | 50 | 9 |
858 | How would you feel if you were all on the same level? | 1.3350 | 0.04254 | 197 | 144 | 40 | 13 |
859 | I'm sorry, Janet. Michael's problems are more interesting this week, so you'll need to give him the top couch. | 1.3350 | 0.04270 | 200 | 147 | 39 | 14 |
860 | One of you is Id. One of you is Ego. One of you is Superego. After the count of three shout out which you think you are. | 1.3350 | 0.04386 | 200 | 149 | 35 | 16 |
861 | I’m not sure I’ve ever heard of tri-polar disorder?” | 1.3333 | 0.04175 | 198 | 144 | 42 | 12 |
862 | You are working through your codependence very nicely, Clarence. You may move up one tier. Gertrude, please move down. | 1.3333 | 0.04175 | 198 | 144 | 42 | 12 |
863 | Look, this is New York. Deal with it. | 1.3333 | 0.04051 | 198 | 142 | 46 | 10 |
864 | I hope the bed wetter isn't on top... | 1.3333 | 0.04414 | 198 | 148 | 34 | 16 |
865 | Just because this is a hostel environment, I don't want you to think you're not in a safe space. | 1.3333 | 0.03987 | 198 | 142 | 44 | 10 |
866 | Bachelor #1, how did you relate to your mother? | 1.3333 | 0.04296 | 198 | 146 | 38 | 14 |
867 | I'm still repaying student loans. Just relax and say whatever comes to minds. | 1.3333 | 0.03922 | 198 | 140 | 50 | 8 |
868 | Before we begin, whose turn is it to cover the copay? | 1.3333 | 0.04113 | 198 | 143 | 44 | 11 |
869 | Three stages of watching TV: The first: Fun, a time-filler. You look normal. The second: Anger, annoyance, a time-consumer. Your appearance has slipped. You are fat, for you don't exercise. The third: It's the only thing you do is You don't eat. | 1.3333 | 0.04909 | 198 | 157 | 16 | 25 |
870 | 'How does it make you feel? How does it make you feel? How does it make you feel?' | 1.3333 | 0.04113 | 198 | 143 | 44 | 11 |
871 | You seem to be experiencing different levels of anxiety. | 1.3333 | 0.03856 | 198 | 139 | 52 | 7 |
872 | No, I still charge the same. | 1.3333 | 0.04414 | 198 | 148 | 34 | 15 |
873 | BernieCare | 1.3333 | 0.04414 | 198 | 148 | 34 | 16 |
874 | Remember it’s Yes, and...top to bottom. | 1.3333 | 0.04696 | 198 | 152 | 24 | 21 |
875 | Why do you feel you'll never stack up? | 1.3333 | 0.04716 | 162 | 119 | 32 | 11 |
876 | Well, it's less a sleep disorder and more of a Sleeping Car disorder | 1.3333 | 0.04529 | 198 | 150 | 30 | 18 |
877 | No, I am not dissing the dissonance, please continue. | 1.3316 | 0.04673 | 196 | 151 | 25 | 20 |
878 | Come on, you three. That's a lot of bunk. | 1.3316 | 0.03944 | 196 | 139 | 49 | 8 |
879 | Just so you know, you can upgrade at any time to the gold plan where there's just two of you or to the platinum plan where you're the only one. | 1.3316 | 0.04138 | 196 | 142 | 43 | 11 |
880 | So you have chosen a TherapyPOOL session. Let me know if any of you' want to switch to TherapySELECT . | 1.3316 | 0.04074 | 196 | 141 | 45 | 10 |
881 | Whether or not you booked through Groupon, this still points to separation anxiety." | 1.3316 | 0.04263 | 196 | 144 | 39 | 13 |
882 | And what do you like to do as a threesome? | 1.3316 | 0.04728 | 196 | 152 | 23 | 21 |
883 | This group therapy session would go more smoothly if you all had the same issues. | 1.3316 | 0.03669 | 196 | 146 | 42 | 8 |
884 | Okay, that's our time... Send in the next three! | 1.3316 | 0.04443 | 196 | 147 | 33 | 16 |
885 | Not all at once, please! | 1.3316 | 0.04324 | 196 | 145 | 37 | 14 |
886 | Well, it's not my problem your parents didn't read the Groupon fine print. | 1.3316 | 0.04010 | 196 | 145 | 40 | 11 |
887 | I thought you said you had mixed personalities | 1.3316 | 0.04838 | 196 | 154 | 19 | 23 |
888 | Let's start by debunking your imaginary friends. | 1.3306 | 0.05033 | 121 | 86 | 30 | 5 |
889 | No matter how efficient I get, the work keeps piling up. | 1.3299 | 0.04227 | 194 | 142 | 40 | 12 |
890 | It's your mother. | 1.3281 | 0.04502 | 192 | 145 | 31 | 16 |
891 | I know, but this is how the buy one get two coupon deal works. | 1.3281 | 0.04188 | 192 | 140 | 41 | 11 |
892 | Group therapy is a bunch of bunk! | 1.3263 | 0.04713 | 190 | 147 | 24 | 19 |
893 | I wonder if Groupon was a good idea. | 1.3263 | 0.04147 | 190 | 138 | 42 | 10 |
894 | Ikea's new "kødependnt" line of sofas. | 1.3263 | 0.04147 | 190 | 138 | 42 | 10 |
895 | In lieu of sliding scale, I'm offering hostel rates. | 1.3263 | 0.04080 | 190 | 141 | 38 | 11 |
896 | So, it sounds like the whole college roommate thing isn't working so well. | 1.3263 | 0.04011 | 190 | 136 | 46 | 8 |
897 | Before we get started, I'll need the Groupon from one of you. | 1.3263 | 0.04214 | 190 | 139 | 40 | 11 |
898 | Let's discuss sibling rivalry: all talk at once. | 1.3263 | 0.04080 | 190 | 137 | 44 | 9 |
899 | In Uber Therapy it’s his hour but you two can take it anywhere you want. | 1.3263 | 0.04080 | 190 | 137 | 44 | 9 |
900 | I need to read these groupons more closely | 1.3263 | 0.03870 | 190 | 138 | 44 | 8 |
901 | Who is holding the Groupon voucher? | 1.3262 | 0.04584 | 187 | 142 | 29 | 15 |
902 | Why does Superego always get the top? | 1.3262 | 0.04457 | 187 | 140 | 33 | 14 |
903 | OK, so which of you is the id and which the ego? | 1.3262 | 0.04769 | 187 | 144 | 23 | 19 |
904 | We won't get anywhere unless you're level with me. | 1.3262 | 0.04457 | 187 | 140 | 33 | 14 |
905 | So, last session we established that you may be a tiny bit obsessed with "This Is Us." | 1.3262 | 0.04521 | 187 | 141 | 31 | 15 |
906 | You should've seen what I had to do for the Brady Bunch kids. | 1.3262 | 0.04191 | 187 | 136 | 41 | 10 |
907 | Please understand that you have literally raised separation anxiety to a new level. | 1.3262 | 0.04122 | 187 | 135 | 43 | 9 |
908 | Which one of you is the id? | 1.3262 | 0.04457 | 187 | 140 | 33 | 14 |
909 | On the bright side, we will also split your copay three ways. | 1.3262 | 0.04052 | 187 | 134 | 45 | 8 |
910 | What if I told you this was not a dream. | 1.3262 | 0.03980 | 187 | 133 | 47 | 7 |
911 | I use Maslow's hierarchy of couches. | 1.3262 | 0.03680 | 187 | 140 | 38 | 7 |
912 | What you're feeling is common for the sandwich generation. | 1.3262 | 0.04457 | 187 | 140 | 33 | 14 |
913 | This is new for me too, but we have just been overwhelmed since the impeachment business failed. | 1.3262 | 0.04457 | 187 | 140 | 33 | 14 |
914 | ...and then I thought, 'how are we ever going to make the payments on a Lamborghini'... | 1.3262 | 0.04326 | 187 | 138 | 37 | 12 |
915 | Guys, please be quiet. Jeff's sharing with us about his intimacy issues. | 1.3262 | 0.04647 | 187 | 143 | 27 | 17 |
916 | Ironically, I think your costs would increase if we took out the middle-man. | 1.3250 | 0.04738 | 160 | 119 | 30 | 11 |
917 | Repeat after me: Our democracy is strong enough to survive this. | 1.3245 | 0.04307 | 188 | 139 | 37 | 12 |
918 | It's the Sanders Plan. No premium. No copay. No waiting. | 1.3243 | 0.04217 | 185 | 135 | 39 | 10 |
919 | Now, starting with you Mary, I want each of you to tell me how you feel about your current position. | 1.3243 | 0.04487 | 185 | 139 | 32 | 14 |
920 | And how does it make you feel that the other two quintuplets are in the basement? | 1.3243 | 0.04354 | 185 | 137 | 36 | 12 |
921 | I understand one you feels he needs more space. | 1.3243 | 0.04286 | 185 | 136 | 38 | 11 |
922 | I know you are disappointed, but this is what a ménage a trois is at a psychiatrist’s office. | 1.3243 | 0.04421 | 185 | 138 | 34 | 13 |
923 | do you have any more personalities? or is that it. | 1.3243 | 0.04076 | 185 | 133 | 44 | 8 |
924 | If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands. | 1.3243 | 0.04421 | 185 | 138 | 34 | 13 |
925 | Studies show, the key to effective group therapy is vertical integration. | 1.3224 | 0.04314 | 183 | 135 | 37 | 11 |
926 | Bachelor number 3, if we were on a date and I stepped away, what toppings would you order on my pizza? | 1.3224 | 0.04172 | 183 | 133 | 41 | 9 |
927 | Welcome to group therapy, we are here to help you not fix you | 1.3224 | 0.04584 | 183 | 139 | 29 | 15 |
928 | You have been arranged according to your credit rating. | 1.3224 | 0.04518 | 183 | 138 | 31 | 14 |
929 | Which of your three personalities would like to begin? | 1.3204 | 0.04124 | 181 | 131 | 42 | 8 |
930 | No, there really are three of you. | 1.3204 | 0.04549 | 181 | 137 | 30 | 14 |
931 | Let's get back to that dream where you're a BLT | 1.3204 | 0.04270 | 181 | 135 | 35 | 11 |
932 | Parallel processing seems to come naturally for you. | 1.3204 | 0.04549 | 181 | 137 | 30 | 14 |
933 | When none of you talk at once, it makes me think you don’t want to be here. | 1.3204 | 0.04270 | 181 | 133 | 38 | 10 |
934 | Well, bad luck does come in threes... | 1.3204 | 0.04481 | 181 | 136 | 32 | 13 |
935 | Maybe next time you'll read the Groupon fine print. | 1.3204 | 0.04412 | 181 | 135 | 34 | 12 |
936 | Because you all have the same problem... | 1.3204 | 0.04412 | 181 | 135 | 34 | 12 |
937 | Hey, this is what you get when you book a therapist through Costco | 1.3204 | 0.04342 | 181 | 134 | 36 | 11 |
938 | Im afraid I can't help if you insist on talking over each other | 1.3204 | 0.04342 | 181 | 134 | 36 | 11 |
939 | It’s a sharing economy, Judith. | 1.3204 | 0.04124 | 181 | 131 | 42 | 8 |
940 | Let’s get started. Who’s on first? | 1.3204 | 0.04412 | 181 | 135 | 34 | 12 |
941 | Let's begin today's session about the relevance of birth order. | 1.3204 | 0.04342 | 181 | 134 | 36 | 11 |
942 | Now, what makes you think your parents don't respect your privacy?" | 1.3204 | 0.04198 | 181 | 132 | 40 | 9 |
943 | So if you'd just call out when I mention your symptom. Mania? Paranoia? Anxiety? ……... | 1.3204 | 0.04270 | 181 | 133 | 38 | 10 |
944 | Maybe you guys should knock next before you decide to give your parents breakfast in bed | 1.3204 | 0.04198 | 181 | 132 | 40 | 9 |
945 | All right, let’s begin with the patient in First Class, and then we’ll work our way down. | 1.3204 | 0.04198 | 181 | 132 | 40 | 9 |
946 | You may be inseparable, but I charge individual rates. | 1.3204 | 0.03973 | 181 | 129 | 46 | 6 |
947 | So this is what airbnb in San Francisco looks like... | 1.3187 | 0.04391 | 182 | 136 | 34 | 12 |
948 | And when did you first feel that you were not being treated as an individual? | 1.3187 | 0.04179 | 182 | 133 | 40 | 9 |
949 | I think you've misunderstood the meaning of "multiple personality disorder." | 1.3184 | 0.04370 | 179 | 133 | 35 | 11 |
950 | And after all of that, you still went back to camp? | 1.3184 | 0.04370 | 179 | 133 | 35 | 11 |
951 | ...the good news is that that several promising studies are underway exploring unshackling the bonding experience of extended cruise ship quarantine. | 1.3184 | 0.04370 | 179 | 133 | 35 | 11 |
952 | Let's start with this. Please tell me how you feel about Trumpcare. | 1.3184 | 0.04441 | 179 | 134 | 33 | 12 |
953 | Your problem, as I see it, is that you’re living on top of each other. | 1.3184 | 0.04224 | 179 | 131 | 39 | 9 |
954 | For next week's special I'm offering to discuss two personal failures for the price of one. | 1.3184 | 0.04648 | 179 | 137 | 27 | 15 |
955 | So all three of you are saying that you don't believe the bunk you've been given. | 1.3184 | 0.04511 | 179 | 135 | 31 | 13 |
956 | See Arthur, you aren`t the most screwed up person in New York. | 1.3184 | 0.04370 | 179 | 133 | 35 | 11 |
957 | Group counseling? | 1.3184 | 0.04511 | 179 | 135 | 31 | 13 |
958 | Okay, Listen up. This is Bunker Therapy. | 1.3184 | 0.05099 | 179 | 144 | 13 | 22 |
959 | Your insurance won't cover your Id, Ego, and Superego | 1.3184 | 0.04511 | 179 | 135 | 31 | 13 |
960 | Democrat, Republican, and Independent, see, we all can get together and stay off Facebook | 1.3184 | 0.04370 | 179 | 133 | 35 | 11 |
961 | Welcome everyone, I'll be your trichiatrist. | 1.3184 | 0.04511 | 179 | 135 | 31 | 13 |
962 | Don't everybody talk at once. | 1.3184 | 0.04298 | 179 | 132 | 37 | 10 |
963 | Are you sure that you're triplets? | 1.3184 | 0.04441 | 179 | 134 | 33 | 12 |
964 | I'm not any happier with this new Preferred Physician network than you are. | 1.3184 | 0.04648 | 179 | 137 | 27 | 15 |
965 | It’s okay, go ahead. Tiers are perfectly healthy. | 1.3184 | 0.04370 | 179 | 133 | 35 | 11 |
966 | And what makes you think you have separation anxiety? | 1.3184 | 0.04511 | 179 | 135 | 31 | 13 |
967 | Well, Russell, you do exhibit all the traits of the middle child... | 1.3184 | 0.04149 | 179 | 130 | 41 | 8 |
968 | To be honest, until today I didn't think your other personalities were real. | 1.3184 | 0.04370 | 179 | 133 | 35 | 11 |
969 | Eeny, meeny, miney, mo. | 1.3184 | 0.04648 | 179 | 137 | 27 | 15 |
970 | ‘Who’s on first?’ | 1.3184 | 0.04580 | 179 | 136 | 29 | 14 |
971 | Now tell me how you all came to believe you were the same person. | 1.3184 | 0.04149 | 179 | 130 | 41 | 8 |
972 | Didn’t read the fine print on the HMO guidelines, huh? | 1.3184 | 0.03995 | 179 | 137 | 33 | 9 |
973 | How would you describe your childhood. Anyone? | 1.3184 | 0.04511 | 179 | 136 | 28 | 14 |
974 | Moving to the top bunk is not the change we've been talking about. | 1.3164 | 0.04682 | 177 | 136 | 26 | 15 |
975 | What makes you think you have multiple personality disorder? | 1.3164 | 0.04251 | 177 | 134 | 32 | 10 |
976 | Perhaps you didn’t understand how a group health plan works. | 1.3164 | 0.04325 | 177 | 131 | 36 | 10 |
977 | I should have said that the three session package deal was not transferrable. | 1.3164 | 0.04097 | 177 | 127 | 42 | 7 |
978 | Therapy can help you on many different levels. | 1.3164 | 0.04174 | 177 | 129 | 40 | 8 |
979 | So, who didn't want the open relationship? | 1.3164 | 0.03937 | 177 | 129 | 42 | 6 |
980 | And just exactly how do these multiple personalities manifest themselves? | 1.3164 | 0.04097 | 177 | 128 | 42 | 7 |
981 | Let's see now: feeling low, middle child syndrome and fear of heights. | 1.3164 | 0.04543 | 177 | 134 | 30 | 13 |
982 | You're all summer camp counselors? What bunk. | 1.3164 | 0.04682 | 177 | 136 | 26 | 15 |
983 | You see? You're just as screwed up as everyone else! | 1.3164 | 0.04613 | 177 | 135 | 28 | 14 |
984 | The important think is that you know you're an individual. And so are you. And you. | 1.3164 | 0.04097 | 177 | 128 | 42 | 7 |
985 | You mentioned that you struggle with codependency. | 1.3164 | 0.04174 | 177 | 129 | 40 | 8 |
986 | So what makes you think you have multiple personalities? | 1.3164 | 0.04174 | 177 | 129 | 40 | 8 |
987 | Wait, which one of you had the mother who always forgot your birthday? | 1.3164 | 0.04325 | 177 | 131 | 36 | 10 |
988 | Next week, it's Lars' turn to be on top. | 1.3164 | 0.04750 | 177 | 137 | 24 | 16 |
989 | I'm just don't think you meet the criteria for split personality disorder. | 1.3164 | 0.04471 | 177 | 133 | 32 | 12 |
990 | Clearly you have childhood issues on multiple levels. | 1.3164 | 0.04399 | 177 | 132 | 34 | 11 |
991 | I'm sorry but you did ask for the "group" discount. | 1.3164 | 0.04251 | 177 | 130 | 38 | 9 |
992 | So how long have you been sleeping in the same room with your imaginary friends? | 1.3164 | 0.04399 | 177 | 132 | 34 | 11 |
993 | Nope, it’s still just 1 hour. | 1.3164 | 0.04399 | 177 | 132 | 34 | 11 |
994 | Let's begin where we left off last week with the difficulties of being a holy trinity. | 1.3164 | 0.04543 | 177 | 134 | 30 | 13 |
995 | Why don’t we start with you, Sybil? | 1.3143 | 0.04277 | 175 | 129 | 37 | 9 |
996 | Remember, no splitting my fee. | 1.3143 | 0.05792 | 105 | 79 | 19 | 7 |
997 | I'm getting the sense that you've all begun to accept the sobering realization that psychoanalysis is actually a lot of bunk. | 1.3143 | 0.04574 | 175 | 133 | 29 | 13 |
998 | So tell me about yourselves. | 1.3143 | 0.04200 | 175 | 128 | 39 | 8 |
999 | How long have you three shared the one personality? | 1.3143 | 0.04354 | 175 | 130 | 35 | 10 |
1000 | And this wasn’t what you were expecting when MaryAnn invited you over for a threesome? | 1.3143 | 0.04428 | 175 | 131 | 33 | 11 |
1001 | I am sorry, but your insurance only covers trichiatry. | 1.3143 | 0.04574 | 175 | 133 | 29 | 13 |
1002 | This is perplexing on so many levels. | 1.3143 | 0.04041 | 175 | 126 | 43 | 6 |
1003 | Let’s debunk that together. | 1.3143 | 0.04428 | 175 | 131 | 33 | 11 |
1004 | So hows the happy thruple? | 1.3143 | 0.04354 | 175 | 130 | 35 | 10 |
1005 | Those are all valid feelings, but I'd like to focus more on your separation anxiety. | 1.3143 | 0.04354 | 175 | 130 | 35 | 10 |
1006 | John, tell me again about feeling trapped? | 1.3143 | 0.03958 | 175 | 125 | 45 | 5 |
1007 | Let’s try and debunk your codependency. | 1.3143 | 0.04354 | 175 | 130 | 35 | 10 |
1008 | Unfortunately, cuts to health insurance mean we have to combine sessions. How does that make you feel? | 1.3143 | 0.04646 | 175 | 134 | 27 | 14 |
1009 | "Welcome to BunkBnT." | 1.3143 | 0.04574 | 175 | 133 | 29 | 13 |
1010 | Proof again that misery loves company. | 1.3143 | 0.04277 | 175 | 129 | 37 | 9 |
1011 | It's called a 'collective unconscious' so it's not important which of you answers the question. | 1.3143 | 0.04121 | 175 | 127 | 41 | 7 |
1012 | I thought you’d all be glad to know that you’re not alone in your suffering. | 1.3143 | 0.04121 | 175 | 127 | 41 | 7 |
1013 | In all fairness, I did tell you this is my most popular time slot. | 1.3143 | 0.04041 | 175 | 126 | 43 | 6 |
1014 | That's correct, the offer was three issues for one price. | 1.3143 | 0.04354 | 175 | 130 | 35 | 10 |
1015 | What you say here remains confidential. | 1.3143 | 0.04428 | 175 | 131 | 33 | 11 |
1016 | Rest assured that you'll still receive a personalized bill. | 1.3140 | 0.04326 | 172 | 125 | 36 | 9 |
1017 | Now that you have decided who will be on top, let us begin. | 1.3140 | 0.04845 | 172 | 134 | 22 | 16 |
1018 | I'd prefer we keep the focus on the roommate situation, but sure Dennis, go ahead and weigh in on Elisa's relationship with her mother. | 1.3140 | 0.04630 | 172 | 131 | 28 | 13 |
1019 | So, Middle Guy, how do you feel about sharing with Top Guy and Bottom Guy which one of them is the father. | 1.3140 | 0.04984 | 172 | 136 | 18 | 18 |
1020 | You each have “ multiple personalities disorders “ | 1.3140 | 0.04326 | 172 | 127 | 36 | 9 |
1021 | Tell me more about your fathers. | 1.3140 | 0.04247 | 172 | 126 | 38 | 8 |
1022 | Remember to never feel ashamed and that you are not alone. | 1.3140 | 0.04774 | 172 | 133 | 24 | 14 |
1023 | One more time, starting from the top. | 1.3140 | 0.04247 | 172 | 126 | 38 | 8 |
1024 | All three of you have the exact same problems requiring the exact same therapy. That's why! | 1.3140 | 0.04404 | 172 | 128 | 34 | 10 |
1025 | Yes, I understand completely. But, your copayments will decrease by two-thirds. | 1.3140 | 0.04404 | 172 | 128 | 34 | 10 |
1026 | How long have you felt that nobody focuses on your needs? | 1.3140 | 0.04630 | 172 | 131 | 28 | 13 |
1027 | What about your professional discount did you not understand? | 1.3140 | 0.04630 | 172 | 131 | 28 | 13 |
1028 | 3...2...1...Liftoff | 1.3140 | 0.05051 | 172 | 137 | 16 | 19 |
1029 | The insurance company asked me to triple my productivity. | 1.3140 | 0.04556 | 172 | 130 | 30 | 12 |
1030 | I sense the underlying issue is white male privilege." | 1.3140 | 0.04326 | 172 | 127 | 36 | 9 |
1031 | And how long have you had this feeling of not being treated as an individual? | 1.3140 | 0.03999 | 172 | 123 | 44 | 5 |
1032 | We want your mortuary preparation training to last a lifetime. | 1.3140 | 0.05051 | 172 | 136 | 16 | 19 |
1033 | Patient number 3, what is your most traumatic childhood memory? | 1.3140 | 0.04404 | 172 | 128 | 34 | 10 |
1034 | I must admit I completely misunderstood your threesome request." | 1.3140 | 0.04247 | 172 | 126 | 38 | 8 |
1035 | Beatrice, Leonard and Thomas, you just need a toast. | 1.3140 | 0.05184 | 172 | 139 | 12 | 21 |
1036 | So, tell me more about your not feeling like an individual... | 1.3140 | 0.04481 | 172 | 129 | 32 | 11 |
1037 | After our session is concluded, please don't forget to rate me on the Uber Therapy Pool app. | 1.3140 | 0.04481 | 172 | 129 | 32 | 11 |
1038 | Three for the price of one? Seriously? | 1.3140 | 0.04703 | 172 | 134 | 23 | 15 |
1039 | Since none of you want to face your problems I thought this might help. | 1.3140 | 0.04845 | 172 | 134 | 22 | 16 |
1040 | Bunk beds tell me a great deal about family dynamics | 1.3140 | 0.04556 | 172 | 130 | 30 | 12 |
1041 | And when would you say you first started having doubts about the sharing economy? | 1.3140 | 0.04247 | 172 | 126 | 38 | 8 |
1042 | OK, any questions on how individual group therapy works?" | 1.3140 | 0.04247 | 172 | 126 | 38 | 8 |
1043 | Welcome to our first session, or what I like to call how Medicare for all covers therapy | 1.3140 | 0.04481 | 172 | 129 | 32 | 11 |
1044 | And Mr. Id, how did it make you feel when Mr. Superego told you to go to CrossFit? | 1.3140 | 0.04630 | 172 | 131 | 28 | 13 |
1045 | And now let's try to debunk some of these sentiments. | 1.3128 | 0.04135 | 179 | 131 | 40 | 8 |
1046 | When did it become clear that your clever menagerie a trois included snakes and lizards? | 1.3121 | 0.05025 | 173 | 138 | 16 | 19 |
1047 | Sorry guys, this is Medicare for All. | 1.3121 | 0.04533 | 173 | 131 | 30 | 12 |
1048 | This is certainly the most severe case of multiple personalities I’ve ever had to treat. | 1.3121 | 0.04146 | 173 | 126 | 40 | 7 |
1049 | Three used to be a crowd, but now it's a group. | 1.3121 | 0.04458 | 173 | 130 | 32 | 11 |
1050 | Now that your multiple personalities are comfortable, let's discuss your fear of heights. | 1.3121 | 0.04533 | 173 | 131 | 30 | 12 |
1051 | $45 upcharge for the accompanying ladder—what a swindle. Some of the support brackets were missing too.” | 1.3121 | 0.04820 | 173 | 135 | 22 | 15 |
1052 | Sorry, group rates only apply to schizophrenia; but you are eligible for my shrink two get one free offer. | 1.3121 | 0.04607 | 173 | 132 | 28 | 13 |
1053 | Alright then, how connected do you feel to the people around you? | 1.3121 | 0.04226 | 173 | 127 | 38 | 8 |
1054 | Dysfunction for $500 | 1.3121 | 0.04820 | 173 | 135 | 22 | 16 |
1055 | And at out next session, Alice, you can be the middle child. | 1.3121 | 0.04458 | 173 | 130 | 32 | 11 |
1056 | I sense a hierarchy in your ‘throuple’ | 1.3121 | 0.04382 | 173 | 129 | 34 | 10 |
1057 | "Let's start with your mother. And your mother. Oh, and I guess your mother, too." | 1.3121 | 0.04064 | 173 | 125 | 42 | 6 |
1058 | We’re here to work through your tiers. | 1.3121 | 0.04146 | 173 | 126 | 40 | 7 |
1059 | And is this your first time visiting a therapist for your codependency? | 1.3121 | 0.04146 | 173 | 126 | 40 | 7 |
1060 | My husband wants me to work less hours. | 1.3121 | 0.04226 | 173 | 127 | 38 | 8 |
1061 | Who wants to go first? Id? Ego? Superego? | 1.3121 | 0.04305 | 173 | 128 | 36 | 9 |
1062 | First off, I'd like to thank you for participating in our group therapy program. | 1.3121 | 0.04607 | 173 | 132 | 28 | 13 |
1063 | So it’s agreed - we all hate our fathers? | 1.3121 | 0.04382 | 173 | 129 | 34 | 10 |
1064 | I said you needed to change your attitude, not your altitude. | 1.3121 | 0.04382 | 173 | 129 | 34 | 10 |
1065 | I'd like to try a new method, top-down processing. Jane, let's start with you. | 1.3118 | 0.04737 | 170 | 131 | 25 | 13 |
1066 | And you still feel you have the middle child syndrome? | 1.3118 | 0.04274 | 170 | 125 | 37 | 8 |
1067 | With your insurance plans, it’s either this or twenty minutes each. | 1.3118 | 0.04108 | 170 | 123 | 41 | 6 |
1068 | So tell me, what brings you in for throuple’s therapy? | 1.3118 | 0.04434 | 170 | 127 | 33 | 10 |
1069 | This is the city, do you have any idea how much it would cost for a waiting room? | 1.3118 | 0.04663 | 170 | 130 | 27 | 13 |
1070 | Last week you told me you felt under water, but this week you're telling me you feel like you're actually in a submarine? | 1.3118 | 0.05091 | 170 | 136 | 15 | 19 |
1071 | Sorry I forgot but which of you is afraid of heights? | 1.3118 | 0.04274 | 170 | 127 | 34 | 9 |
1072 | Tell me again why you feel you're not getting enough special attention. | 1.3118 | 0.04663 | 170 | 130 | 27 | 13 |
1073 | Cost effective alternatives to universal healthcare | 1.3118 | 0.04274 | 170 | 125 | 37 | 8 |
1074 | Efficient, yes. Effective remains to be seen. | 1.3118 | 0.04022 | 170 | 122 | 43 | 5 |
1075 | Your HMO thinks this is innovative. | 1.3118 | 0.04108 | 170 | 123 | 41 | 6 |
1076 | This is the first time I have ever done throuple’s therapy. | 1.3118 | 0.04354 | 170 | 126 | 35 | 9 |
1077 | I think we should start with Mom. | 1.3118 | 0.04022 | 170 | 122 | 43 | 5 |
1078 | I want you all to think back on that night at summer camp. | 1.3118 | 0.04108 | 170 | 126 | 37 | 7 |
1079 | I'm sorry, which one of you just said that thing about your mother?" | 1.3103 | 0.04361 | 174 | 130 | 34 | 10 |
1080 | I'm sorry for the stacking, but we have a backlog of therapist cartoon captions. | 1.3099 | 0.04713 | 171 | 132 | 25 | 14 |
1081 | What part of Medicare for All did you not understand? | 1.3099 | 0.04489 | 171 | 129 | 31 | 11 |
1082 | You'll find these group sessions to be beneficial and cost effective. So Lauren let's start with your fear of heights then dig into Nicks issues middle child syndrome and finish with Mikes fear of being crushed. | 1.3099 | 0.04489 | 171 | 129 | 31 | 11 |
1083 | How long have you been binge-watching “This is Us” together? | 1.3099 | 0.04333 | 171 | 127 | 35 | 9 |
1084 | The Jingleheimer Schmidt triplets were having a hard time coping with all being named John Jacob | 1.3099 | 0.04565 | 171 | 130 | 29 | 12 |
1085 | Next week, we’ll try talking and by month’s end we might be ready to try eye contact. | 1.3099 | 0.04253 | 171 | 126 | 37 | 8 |
1086 | Well this is awkward...Your insurance just called and they said they’re only able to cover one of your personalities for therapy. | 1.3099 | 0.04411 | 171 | 128 | 33 | 10 |
1087 | Due to patient confidentiality, I'm unable to use your real names. | 1.3099 | 0.04713 | 171 | 132 | 25 | 14 |
1088 | Why don't you start, Mrs. Wallenda? | 1.3099 | 0.04489 | 171 | 129 | 31 | 11 |
1089 | If it's not one thing, it's your mother. | 1.3099 | 0.04489 | 171 | 129 | 31 | 11 |
1090 | You're here because you're not special. Who would like to start? | 1.3099 | 0.04411 | 171 | 128 | 33 | 10 |
1091 | I just wanted to let you all know ... this is my first threesome. | 1.3099 | 0.04171 | 171 | 125 | 39 | 7 |
1092 | I'll need more time to debunk this one | 1.3099 | 0.04253 | 171 | 126 | 37 | 8 |
1093 | What makes you think I'm a cut-rate psychiatrist? | 1.3099 | 0.04253 | 171 | 124 | 37 | 8 |
1094 | So you were saying...you feel your mother never gave you her undivided attention? | 1.3099 | 0.04253 | 171 | 125 | 37 | 8 |
1095 | Before we start, there’s the 33% co-pay. | 1.3098 | 0.04054 | 184 | 135 | 41 | 8 |
1096 | I don't think the new system is impersonal at all, Patient #24601 | 1.3095 | 0.04301 | 168 | 124 | 36 | 8 |
1097 | When did you start feeling like people were always talking over you? | 1.3095 | 0.04464 | 168 | 126 | 32 | 10 |
1098 | Before we discuss mothers, let's talk about boundaries in Groupon therapy." | 1.3095 | 0.04697 | 168 | 129 | 26 | 13 |
1099 | The group discount does not apply to the bottom bunk. | 1.3095 | 0.04301 | 168 | 124 | 36 | 8 |
1100 | Have you ever considered a tub? | 1.3095 | 0.04920 | 168 | 132 | 20 | 15 |
1101 | Of course you have doctor-patient confidentiality. | 1.3095 | 0.04218 | 168 | 123 | 38 | 7 |
1102 | Id, why don't you start. | 1.3095 | 0.04464 | 168 | 126 | 32 | 10 |
1103 | OK. Thanks for sharing, super-ego. I think it's time we heard now from the Id. | 1.3095 | 0.04697 | 168 | 131 | 23 | 14 |
1104 | Thank you all for signing the Privacy Notice. Let the healing begin... | 1.3095 | 0.04464 | 168 | 126 | 32 | 10 |
1105 | Let's start with why you feel there's a pecking order. | 1.3095 | 0.04543 | 168 | 127 | 30 | 11 |
1106 | Sorry about the crowd Charlie, Medicare for all has caused some issues. | 1.3095 | 0.04301 | 168 | 124 | 36 | 8 |
1107 | And how does that make you -- Oh, we have to stop now. And how does that make you -- Oh, we have to stop now. And how does that make you -- Oh, we have to stop now. | 1.3095 | 0.04543 | 168 | 127 | 30 | 11 |
1108 | Multiple personalities doesn’t mean three people, I’m afraid. | 1.3095 | 0.04383 | 168 | 125 | 34 | 9 |
1109 | Now Greg, tell me more about the voices you hear. | 1.3095 | 0.04218 | 168 | 123 | 38 | 7 |
1110 | Psychiatry in the age of socialized medicine. | 1.3095 | 0.04464 | 168 | 126 | 32 | 10 |
1111 | And based on your goals, the app will figure out who is done with treatment first, second, etc. | 1.3095 | 0.04621 | 168 | 128 | 28 | 12 |
1112 | ...I really need to rethink "Three for One" Thursdays | 1.3095 | 0.04383 | 168 | 125 | 34 | 9 |
1113 | So, tell me, why do you think you suffer from schizophrenia? | 1.3095 | 0.04773 | 168 | 130 | 24 | 14 |
1114 | Since the need for mental health care tripled since Trump took office, Dr. Green found a way to provide it! | 1.3095 | 0.04383 | 168 | 124 | 34 | 9 |
1115 | Three more who believe the New Yorker caption contest has run its course. | 1.3095 | 0.04847 | 168 | 130 | 22 | 15 |
1116 | So to summarize our last session, Ego and Supergo could no longer tolerate Id... | 1.3095 | 0.04383 | 168 | 125 | 34 | 9 |
1117 | So, DeWayne, when she said "threesome", what was the first thing that went through your mind? | 1.3095 | 0.04132 | 168 | 122 | 40 | 6 |
1118 | In your case, multiple personalities isn't a disorder. | 1.3095 | 0.04218 | 168 | 127 | 31 | 9 |
1119 | So, which one of you is Bacon, which one of you is Lettuce, and which one is Tomato? | 1.3095 | 0.04218 | 168 | 127 | 32 | 8 |
1120 | Not so sure about this groupon therapy. | 1.3095 | 0.04847 | 168 | 131 | 22 | 15 |
1121 | I said that it would more economical, not necessarily more therapeutic. | 1.3095 | 0.04301 | 168 | 124 | 36 | 8 |
1122 | So you're saying you feel that men are beneath you? | 1.3095 | 0.04383 | 168 | 125 | 34 | 9 |
1123 | I thought they hired me to work with "hostile" youths. | 1.3095 | 0.04697 | 168 | 129 | 26 | 13 |
1124 | Welcome to progressive Mormon marriage counseling. | 1.3095 | 0.04301 | 168 | 124 | 36 | 8 |
1125 | Trust me, you're not the first ones in here from trying a three-way. | 1.3095 | 0.04383 | 168 | 125 | 34 | 9 |
1126 | You seem to be having issues with sharing your feelings. | 1.3095 | 0.04218 | 168 | 123 | 38 | 7 |
1127 | With the discount plan, each of you can only express one third of your problems. | 1.3095 | 0.04218 | 168 | 123 | 38 | 7 |
1128 | Our confide-share program is the most cost effective therapy since screaming into your pillow. | 1.3095 | 0.04383 | 168 | 125 | 34 | 9 |
1129 | Remember, patients a,b,and c, that you are unique and special - and a little cheap. Next! | 1.3095 | 0.04383 | 168 | 125 | 34 | 9 |
1130 | Just to be clear, Ted, the discount only applies if you all stick to the same psychosis. | 1.3095 | 0.04464 | 168 | 126 | 32 | 10 |
1131 | Each sibling will have one minute for direct response, and a lifetime for rebuttals. | 1.3082 | 0.04367 | 159 | 119 | 32 | 8 |
1132 | Astrid, why do you feel that 'male problems' are beneath you? | 1.3072 | 0.04329 | 166 | 123 | 35 | 8 |
1133 | What did you expect with Groupon®? | 1.3072 | 0.05103 | 166 | 133 | 15 | 18 |
1134 | How long have you been scared to be alone? | 1.3072 | 0.04495 | 166 | 125 | 31 | 10 |
1135 | In respect of your privacy I shall address you, from top to bottom, as superego, ego, and id. | 1.3072 | 0.04244 | 166 | 122 | 37 | 7 |
1136 | Just as a reminder, you each saved $11.37 by selecting the therapy pool option today. | 1.3072 | 0.04329 | 166 | 123 | 35 | 8 |
1137 | Have you considered that maybe ‘This is Us’ is not really about you? | 1.3072 | 0.04244 | 166 | 122 | 37 | 7 |
1138 | Welcome to all of you using Groupon. | 1.3072 | 0.04244 | 166 | 122 | 37 | 7 |
1139 | so you met on the train and then,what happened ? | 1.3072 | 0.04413 | 166 | 124 | 33 | 9 |
1140 | So the menage a trois didn't go like you'd hoped... | 1.3049 | 0.04442 | 164 | 123 | 32 | 9 |
1141 | So, how are you progressing with the concept of layered experience? | 1.3049 | 0.04271 | 164 | 121 | 36 | 7 |
1142 | Welcome to the therapy economy class. | 1.3049 | 0.03999 | 164 | 118 | 42 | 4 |
1143 | So, how long have you felt you were triplets? | 1.3049 | 0.04526 | 164 | 124 | 30 | 10 |
1144 | When did you begin thinking that you were a quartet instead of trio? | 1.3025 | 0.04116 | 162 | 118 | 39 | 5 |
1145 | It seems that the three of you have a single personality | 1.3025 | 0.04558 | 162 | 123 | 29 | 10 |
1146 | It’s called Groupon, what were you expecting? | 1.3025 | 0.04473 | 162 | 122 | 31 | 9 |
1147 | The insurance company said it was either this, or capping each client at a maximum of three sessions per year. On the bright side, I'm allowed to bill for two clients per session. | 1.3025 | 0.05261 | 162 | 131 | 11 | 19 |
1148 | Guys, congratulations on choosing our three-for-the-price-of-one discount offer. Just don't all talk at once, okay? | 1.3025 | 0.04803 | 162 | 126 | 23 | 13 |
1149 | I am one of the few therapists who will work with roommate conflicts. | 1.3025 | 0.04298 | 162 | 120 | 35 | 7 |
1150 | So, Sybil. Would you like to introduce your friends? | 1.3025 | 0.04558 | 162 | 123 | 29 | 10 |
1151 | Well, it comes down to this: We all have the same problems. | 1.3025 | 0.04558 | 162 | 123 | 29 | 10 |
1152 | Until I get conclusive evidence of multiple personality disorder, I'm going to have to charge you triple. | 1.3025 | 0.04386 | 162 | 121 | 33 | 8 |
1153 | When did you first imagine you were identical triplets? | 1.3025 | 0.04558 | 162 | 123 | 29 | 10 |
1154 | Jeffrey is fully participating in the group. He just needs a little more space. | 1.3025 | 0.04641 | 162 | 124 | 27 | 11 |
1155 | I know it's a group session but I'll still need 3 copays. | 1.3025 | 0.04641 | 162 | 124 | 27 | 11 |
1156 | Now what did one of you say about multitasking? | 1.3025 | 0.04558 | 162 | 123 | 29 | 10 |
1157 | So, when did you realize your weren't identical triplets? | 1.3025 | 0.04298 | 162 | 119 | 32 | 8 |
1158 | I don't think this is a genuine case of multiple personalities." | 1.3025 | 0.04558 | 162 | 123 | 29 | 10 |
1159 | I’m seeing signs of multiple personalities. | 1.3025 | 0.04298 | 162 | 120 | 35 | 7 |
1160 | This Coronavirus quarantine won’t last forever guys so let’s just deal with it, ok? So Rodney,any progress with your erectile dysfunction problems? | 1.3025 | 0.04641 | 162 | 124 | 27 | 11 |
1161 | So what brings you to menage therapy? | 1.3025 | 0.04641 | 162 | 124 | 27 | 11 |
1162 | It’s all going to be fine...next three please | 1.3019 | 0.04701 | 159 | 122 | 26 | 10 |
1163 | You know - there are three levels of awareness here. | 1.3019 | 0.04065 | 159 | 117 | 37 | 5 |
1164 | Coach class therapy is not as comfortable as first, but it gets you to the same place. | 1.3006 | 0.04533 | 163 | 124 | 29 | 10 |
1165 | Mr. Simms, I believe your multiple personality disorder is escalating. | 1.3000 | 0.04590 | 160 | 122 | 28 | 10 |
1166 | Why do you millennials think you are not treated as individual mature adults? | 1.3000 | 0.04326 | 160 | 119 | 34 | 7 |
1167 | When did you begin to believe that you are triplets? | 1.3000 | 0.04326 | 160 | 119 | 34 | 7 |
1168 | So Terry, what I understand is that you feel that your siblings are always above you. | 1.3000 | 0.04140 | 160 | 117 | 38 | 5 |
1169 | To be clear, I still need to charge each of you separately | 1.3000 | 0.04140 | 160 | 119 | 34 | 6 |
1170 | Your friends may dismiss your concerns as 'bunk,' but rest assured I'll listen | 1.3000 | 0.04326 | 160 | 119 | 34 | 7 |
1171 | Welcome to your first Summer Camp counseling sessoin. | 1.3000 | 0.04675 | 160 | 123 | 26 | 11 |
1172 | Okay, from the top down | 1.3000 | 0.04416 | 160 | 120 | 32 | 8 |
1173 | Look this healthcare for all is going to take some getting used to." | 1.3000 | 0.04504 | 160 | 121 | 30 | 9 |
1174 | Sometimes a bunk bed is just a bunk bed | 1.3000 | 0.04234 | 160 | 118 | 36 | 6 |
1175 | Remind me ... which one of you was dealing with impotency? | 1.3000 | 0.04675 | 160 | 123 | 26 | 11 |
1176 | Hostel therapy | 1.3000 | 0.04504 | 160 | 121 | 30 | 9 |
1177 | And how did that make us feel? | 1.3000 | 0.04590 | 160 | 122 | 28 | 10 |
1178 | I got the idea from my hair salon - three couches, no waiting! | 1.3000 | 0.04140 | 160 | 117 | 38 | 5 |
1179 | You only get the group rate if your problems are the same. | 1.3000 | 0.04675 | 160 | 123 | 26 | 11 |
1180 | Unfortunately, this style of therapy will soon be debunked | 1.3000 | 0.04590 | 160 | 122 | 28 | 10 |
1181 | I'd like to debunk the myth that I overbook my appointments. | 1.2994 | 0.03940 | 167 | 121 | 42 | 4 |
1182 | So, have any of you been in group therapy before? | 1.2994 | 0.04377 | 157 | 117 | 33 | 7 |
1183 | Pizza Rat?? Coffee Rat?? Wait till they get a load of me! | 1.2975 | 0.05198 | 158 | 125 | 13 | 17 |
1184 | I have a lot of patients who fantasize about threesomes. | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1185 | I specialize in couple’s therapy for a Ménage á trios | 1.2975 | 0.04535 | 158 | 120 | 29 | 9 |
1186 | As this is a basic economy session, each patient is only allowed one repressed memory. | 1.2975 | 0.04535 | 158 | 120 | 29 | 9 |
1187 | It was in the insurance policy’s fine print. Anyway, let’s tackle today’s topic: trust issues | 1.2975 | 0.04445 | 158 | 119 | 31 | 8 |
1188 | Would you say the problems started immediately after you left the space station? | 1.2975 | 0.04535 | 158 | 120 | 29 | 9 |
1189 | What's on your minds? | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1190 | Alright, I'll now be analyzing our platinum level patient. If the rest of you could just not listen that would be great. | 1.2975 | 0.04260 | 158 | 117 | 35 | 6 |
1191 | Psychotherapist, no, I’m a conceptual artist and you’re part of a “performance art” piece. | 1.2975 | 0.04535 | 158 | 120 | 29 | 9 |
1192 | Only three family members are allowed according to the terms of my psychotherapy Groupon | 1.2975 | 0.04794 | 158 | 123 | 23 | 12 |
1193 | Try not to talk over each other. | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1194 | Which one of you had the fear of heights again? | 1.2975 | 0.04623 | 158 | 121 | 27 | 10 |
1195 | Therapy at any level is healthy. | 1.2975 | 0.04164 | 158 | 116 | 37 | 5 |
1196 | So tell me why you think psychology is bunk. | 1.2975 | 0.04445 | 158 | 119 | 31 | 8 |
1197 | This has many layers. | 1.2975 | 0.04535 | 158 | 120 | 29 | 9 |
1198 | The group discount only applies if you all have the same problems. | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1199 | This is your last session with the three for one coupon. | 1.2975 | 0.03966 | 158 | 116 | 38 | 4 |
1200 | I'm glad you could all be here thanks to the new Medicare Therapy Tier Reimbursement system. | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1201 | Generally, multi personalies show up in one person. | 1.2975 | 0.04535 | 158 | 120 | 29 | 9 |
1202 | Your insurance company felt this was the best option. | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1203 | Did you order this family session on Amazon ? | 1.2975 | 0.04445 | 158 | 119 | 31 | 8 |
1204 | For today's group therapy, you'll be cast in the role of either eldest, middle, or youngest child. For starters, guess which one you are. | 1.2975 | 0.04260 | 158 | 117 | 35 | 6 |
1205 | Which one of you is the Id? Can I talk to the Id for a minute? | 1.2975 | 0.04623 | 158 | 121 | 27 | 10 |
1206 | Well in my defense, I did mention that I have experience diagnosing multiple personalities. | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1207 | Yes, it does present some HIPAA challenges but I have tripled my caseload. | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1208 | Margaret, continue. You were talking about your low self-esteem before we leap-frogged you to address Nick's narcissistic tendencies. | 1.2975 | 0.04710 | 158 | 122 | 25 | 11 |
1209 | Your stories brought me to tiers. | 1.2975 | 0.04535 | 158 | 120 | 29 | 9 |
1210 | Who told you the fee would be split 3 ways | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1211 | And how does that make we feel? | 1.2975 | 0.04445 | 158 | 119 | 31 | 8 |
1212 | Sometimes, I don't even recognize myself. | 1.2975 | 0.04623 | 158 | 121 | 27 | 10 |
1213 | So…childhood sleep-away camp trauma...Who’d like to start?” | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1214 | It looks like we’re out of time. Your Uber pool is waiting outside. | 1.2975 | 0.04623 | 158 | 121 | 27 | 10 |
1215 | No, it's nothing therapeutic, I just repurposed my kids' bunks. | 1.2975 | 0.04535 | 158 | 120 | 29 | 9 |
1216 | And what did you think three for the price of one meant? | 1.2975 | 0.04260 | 158 | 117 | 35 | 6 |
1217 | This question goes to all of you. | 1.2975 | 0.04260 | 158 | 117 | 35 | 6 |
1218 | This isn't what I expected when you said "triple booked." | 1.2975 | 0.04445 | 158 | 119 | 31 | 8 |
1219 | So, you think you are at a low point, who do you think is above you? | 1.2975 | 0.04794 | 158 | 123 | 23 | 12 |
1220 | Mary, let's start with you. How did UberPooling with Mike and Jayson make you feel? | 1.2975 | 0.04878 | 158 | 124 | 21 | 13 |
1221 | So, you say you’re hearing voices? | 1.2975 | 0.04445 | 158 | 119 | 31 | 8 |
1222 | Which one of you had the Groupon coupon? | 1.2975 | 0.04960 | 158 | 125 | 19 | 14 |
1223 | So your mothers tell me you think psychiatry is bunk... | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1224 | This appears to be a rather advanced case of multiple personality disorder. | 1.2975 | 0.04710 | 158 | 122 | 25 | 11 |
1225 | The bunks are IKEA, so no fidgeting | 1.2975 | 0.04535 | 158 | 119 | 29 | 9 |
1226 | Now close your eyes and try to visualize the mortgage on my new cottage in the Hamptons. | 1.2975 | 0.04535 | 158 | 120 | 29 | 9 |
1227 | Number 3, how long have you had this Nearer my God to Thee feeling? | 1.2975 | 0.04445 | 158 | 119 | 31 | 8 |
1228 | And where do you think these concerns about confidentiality come from? | 1.2975 | 0.04445 | 158 | 119 | 31 | 8 |
1229 | Who else feels unimportant? | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1230 | Your medical insurance won't pay for a private couch. | 1.2975 | 0.04066 | 158 | 116 | 36 | 5 |
1231 | I’m rethinking The whole idea of offering a Groupon For therapy. | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1232 | Without universal healthcare, this is the best we do for now. | 1.2975 | 0.04878 | 158 | 123 | 21 | 12 |
1233 | So, starting from the top, Betty's scared of heights, Mike's claustrophobic, and Tom has a fear of gravity. | 1.2975 | 0.04354 | 158 | 118 | 33 | 7 |
1234 | To be honest, I'm not sure if insurance covers groupon sessions. | 1.2975 | 0.04164 | 158 | 117 | 33 | 6 |
1235 | It's your parent's fault. Your parent's fault. Your parent's fault... | 1.2975 | 0.04794 | 158 | 123 | 23 | 12 |
1236 | First, let me explain to the audience the rules for this latest Democratic Debate 2020. | 1.2975 | 0.04445 | 158 | 119 | 31 | 8 |
1237 | There are three people in this marriage. | 1.2968 | 0.04593 | 155 | 118 | 28 | 9 |
1238 | Next week Janet you can be the middle child. | 1.2968 | 0.03902 | 155 | 111 | 42 | 2 |
1239 | On the other hand, family therapy is not for everyone! | 1.2968 | 0.04772 | 155 | 120 | 24 | 11 |
1240 | All three of you share the same personality disorder. I thought it was a good time for you all to meet. | 1.2968 | 0.04593 | 155 | 118 | 28 | 9 |
1241 | Multiple personality disorder is a subset. Let's deal with the multiple body disorder first. | 1.2965 | 0.04436 | 172 | 132 | 29 | 11 |
1242 | So, Kate, Randall, and Kevin -- where would you like to begin? | 1.2963 | 0.04189 | 162 | 120 | 36 | 6 |
1243 | Do I need to remind you that you wanted Medicare for all? | 1.2956 | 0.04421 | 159 | 120 | 31 | 8 |
1244 | I hope that explains the differences in tier one, two and three health insurance. | 1.2949 | 0.04382 | 156 | 117 | 32 | 7 |
1245 | I think you have thoroughly misunderstood what 'ménage à trois' means. | 1.2949 | 0.04189 | 156 | 115 | 36 | 5 |
1246 | Well thanks for signing up for rideshare therapy, who wants to go first? | 1.2949 | 0.04476 | 156 | 118 | 30 | 8 |
1247 | I would love to see you individually,but your insurance says you're on the multi-tier plan. | 1.2949 | 0.04476 | 156 | 118 | 30 | 8 |
1248 | And most importantly, everything you tell me will be completely confidential. | 1.2949 | 0.04382 | 156 | 117 | 32 | 7 |
1249 | So let's start with Marty. What makes YOU the most angry about health insurance cutbacks? | 1.2949 | 0.04657 | 156 | 120 | 26 | 10 |
1250 | And how have rising health care costs affected you, Joe? | 1.2949 | 0.04382 | 156 | 117 | 32 | 7 |
1251 | What makes you think you suffer from separation anxiety? | 1.2949 | 0.04382 | 156 | 117 | 32 | 7 |
1252 | Of course I care about you. Why do you ask? | 1.2949 | 0.04382 | 156 | 117 | 32 | 7 |
1253 | Sorry, it's the new diversity rules. | 1.2949 | 0.04567 | 156 | 119 | 28 | 9 |
1254 | Do you think you need to set more boundaries with your parents? | 1.2949 | 0.04657 | 156 | 120 | 26 | 10 |
1255 | This isn't quite what I pictured when you said "group therapy." | 1.2949 | 0.04382 | 156 | 117 | 32 | 7 |
1256 | The good news is you’re all still covered by medicare. | 1.2949 | 0.04476 | 156 | 118 | 30 | 8 |
1257 | So, before we begin, let’s address the elephant in the room. Yes, the chairs are imitation leather. | 1.2949 | 0.04831 | 156 | 122 | 22 | 12 |
1258 | Will the real schizophrenic please stand up... | 1.2941 | 0.04238 | 153 | 113 | 35 | 5 |
1259 | Repeat after me, Triskaphobia is imaginary. | 1.2941 | 0.04718 | 153 | 118 | 25 | 10 |
1260 | Okay, let's begin. Number 3, you are lying at the bottom under Number 1 and 2. How does that make you feel? | 1.2941 | 0.04626 | 153 | 117 | 27 | 9 |
1261 | I'm sorry but our private equity investors insist. | 1.2941 | 0.04984 | 153 | 121 | 19 | 13 |
1262 | With whom shall we start? | 1.2941 | 0.04897 | 153 | 120 | 21 | 12 |
1263 | Doc, I just have this feeling that everyone else is beneath me. | 1.2941 | 0.04436 | 153 | 115 | 31 | 7 |
1264 | With the political season underway, this is the only way I can squeeze everyone in. | 1.2941 | 0.04532 | 153 | 116 | 29 | 8 |
1265 | In these sessions, we'll try to confront James' fear of meeting only low expectations; Arnold's middle child syndrome; and Sarah's acrophobia. | 1.2941 | 0.04532 | 153 | 116 | 29 | 8 |
1266 | Normally I resist the diagnosis of multiple personality disorder. | 1.2922 | 0.03901 | 154 | 111 | 41 | 2 |
1267 | C'mon, how do you two feel about her being on top? | 1.2917 | 0.04167 | 168 | 126 | 35 | 7 |
1268 | Because the first born is always held to a higher standard. | 1.2914 | 0.04264 | 151 | 112 | 34 | 5 |
1269 | And why do you think you have middle child syndrome? | 1.2914 | 0.04845 | 151 | 118 | 22 | 11 |
1270 | So, let's talk about codependency | 1.2914 | 0.04366 | 151 | 113 | 32 | 6 |
1271 | Before starting, can I see all your Groupon vouchers please? | 1.2914 | 0.04564 | 151 | 115 | 28 | 8 |
1272 | Okay, so which one of you is the middle child? | 1.2914 | 0.04264 | 151 | 111 | 34 | 5 |
1273 | Okay, everyone's Groupon checks out. Let's begin. | 1.2914 | 0.04366 | 151 | 113 | 32 | 6 |
1274 | So you say your problems feel like they are piling up on you... | 1.2914 | 0.04660 | 151 | 116 | 26 | 9 |
1275 | Next time read the fine print on the Groupon. | 1.2914 | 0.04660 | 151 | 116 | 26 | 9 |
1276 | This is Medicare-for-all psychoanalysis | 1.2914 | 0.04366 | 151 | 113 | 32 | 6 |
1277 | Welcome to your family therapy session. | 1.2914 | 0.05112 | 151 | 121 | 16 | 13 |
1278 | Singular Personality Disorder: When multiple people hear the same voice in their heads. | 1.2914 | 0.04366 | 151 | 113 | 32 | 6 |
1279 | Under the Bernie Plan, you will appreciate enormous savings for your individualized therapy. | 1.2914 | 0.04660 | 151 | 116 | 26 | 9 |
1280 | My bad, says here, scared of heights, being crushed, and oh dear. | 1.2914 | 0.04753 | 151 | 117 | 24 | 10 |
1281 | that is not what we mean as a "threesome" | 1.2886 | 0.04290 | 149 | 111 | 33 | 5 |
1282 | So Doris, I see you're a bed wetter. | 1.2886 | 0.04694 | 149 | 115 | 25 | 9 |
1283 | As you can see, I do exclusively thruples therapy. | 1.2886 | 0.04395 | 149 | 112 | 31 | 6 |
1284 | That's our new service for therapy addicts planning to quit. | 1.2886 | 0.04694 | 149 | 115 | 25 | 9 |
1285 | Have you thought that you might be putting others above yourself? | 1.2886 | 0.04290 | 149 | 111 | 33 | 5 |
1286 | So Debbie, you’ll be our judgmental super ego, Brad will play the poor pushed around ego, and Bobby, you’ll be the filthy little Id, won’t you? | 1.2886 | 0.04290 | 149 | 111 | 33 | 5 |
1287 | I love Groupon | 1.2886 | 0.05066 | 149 | 119 | 17 | 12 |
1288 | So when did you first discover that you weren't triplets? | 1.2886 | 0.04497 | 149 | 113 | 29 | 7 |
1289 | In order to be eligible for the discounted rate you must all pretend to have the same problem. | 1.2886 | 0.04596 | 149 | 114 | 27 | 8 |
1290 | You’ll all get a chance to be the middle child | 1.2886 | 0.04073 | 149 | 109 | 37 | 3 |
1291 | None of your policies cover individual therapy. | 1.2886 | 0.04596 | 149 | 114 | 27 | 8 |
1292 | How would you describe these monsters under you bed? | 1.2886 | 0.04290 | 149 | 111 | 33 | 5 |
1293 | Groupon, right? | 1.2886 | 0.04290 | 149 | 111 | 33 | 5 |
1294 | Person in the lower bunk, do you have similar feelings? | 1.2886 | 0.04975 | 149 | 118 | 19 | 12 |
1295 | Anything you share today is covered by patient-patient-patient-doctor confidentiality. | 1.2886 | 0.04290 | 149 | 111 | 33 | 5 |
1296 | No, this is what I meant when I asked would you like to do a threesome? | 1.2886 | 0.04694 | 149 | 115 | 25 | 9 |
1297 | OK, let's start at the top and work our way to the root of the matter. | 1.2886 | 0.04596 | 149 | 114 | 27 | 8 |
1298 | What did you expect when you used a groupon? | 1.2886 | 0.04290 | 149 | 111 | 33 | 5 |
1299 | Ok Millennials. | 1.2886 | 0.04596 | 149 | 114 | 27 | 8 |
1300 | It was hard enough with just couples counseling but I think this should work for a love triangle | 1.2886 | 0.04395 | 149 | 112 | 31 | 6 |
1301 | Most people don't bring their parents... | 1.2886 | 0.04395 | 149 | 112 | 31 | 6 |
1302 | OK, Jim, you can have the top couch next time. | 1.2886 | 0.04497 | 149 | 113 | 29 | 7 |
1303 | Let's keep the questions multiple choice. | 1.2877 | 0.04657 | 146 | 112 | 26 | 8 |
1304 | So, what I think I’m hearing you say is that you are not yet ready to move out of your parents’ basements? | 1.2877 | 0.04657 | 146 | 112 | 26 | 8 |
1305 | Ted, you feel smothered by your siblings... tell me more about that. | 1.2877 | 0.04342 | 146 | 109 | 32 | 5 |
1306 | And which personality actually pulled the trigger? | 1.2877 | 0.05139 | 146 | 117 | 16 | 13 |
1307 | I hate this new Trumpcare! | 1.2877 | 0.04555 | 146 | 111 | 28 | 7 |
1308 | Well, the good news is you don't have multiple personality disorder. | 1.2877 | 0.04342 | 146 | 109 | 32 | 5 |
1309 | Group Personal Therapy | 1.2874 | 0.03993 | 167 | 124 | 38 | 5 |
1310 | So how does that make you feel? make you feel? make you feel? | 1.2857 | 0.04630 | 147 | 113 | 26 | 8 |
1311 | I am sorry to say starting next week the upper and lower couches will have a twenty five dollar supplemental fee. | 1.2857 | 0.04424 | 147 | 111 | 30 | 6 |
1312 | What did a three for one special mean to you? | 1.2857 | 0.04424 | 147 | 111 | 29 | 6 |
1313 | Which one of you has the middle child syndrome? | 1.2857 | 0.04528 | 147 | 112 | 28 | 7 |
1314 | "Come on, guys, one more personality and we've got the record." | 1.2857 | 0.04630 | 147 | 113 | 26 | 8 |
1315 | When after your trip to Tokyo did you start to feel this way? | 1.2857 | 0.04424 | 147 | 111 | 30 | 6 |
1316 | Welcome to socialized medicine! | 1.2857 | 0.04528 | 147 | 112 | 28 | 7 |
1317 | Those of you who think it’s your mother’s fault, raise your hand. | 1.2857 | 0.04424 | 147 | 111 | 29 | 6 |
1318 | Medicare for all is not what it was cracked up to be | 1.2857 | 0.04424 | 147 | 111 | 30 | 6 |
1319 | Yes, I'm sensing some co-dependency. | 1.2857 | 0.04208 | 147 | 109 | 34 | 4 |
1320 | Looking pregnant and being pregnant have very different psychological implications. | 1.2857 | 0.04729 | 147 | 114 | 24 | 9 |
1321 | So Donald, what did you eat for dinner last night? | 1.2857 | 0.05016 | 147 | 117 | 18 | 12 |
1322 | How long have you been a throuple?" | 1.2857 | 0.04317 | 147 | 110 | 32 | 5 |
1323 | Before we get started, let me explain what we know about multiple personality. | 1.2857 | 0.04424 | 147 | 111 | 30 | 6 |
1324 | People, let’s focus on what you actually LIKE about living in a dorm in your 40s | 1.2857 | 0.04827 | 147 | 115 | 22 | 10 |
1325 | It is important to remember that you’re not alone in your bunk bed addiction | 1.2857 | 0.05016 | 147 | 117 | 18 | 12 |
1326 | Tell me again about these repressed memories of summer camp. | 1.2857 | 0.04528 | 147 | 112 | 28 | 7 |
1327 | Billy, what if you could tell your parents what you just told me? Well I've got a surprise for you! | 1.2857 | 0.04729 | 147 | 114 | 24 | 9 |
1328 | Yes, Vernon, our office's scheduling site is broken...how does that make you feel? | 1.2857 | 0.04630 | 147 | 113 | 26 | 8 |
1329 | Were you college room-mates? | 1.2857 | 0.04317 | 147 | 110 | 32 | 5 |
1330 | Be sure to give the receptionist your groupon voucher when you leave. | 1.2857 | 0.04528 | 147 | 112 | 28 | 7 |
1331 | Life is not a level playing field. That will be $100, $50 and $20. | 1.2857 | 0.04317 | 168 | 129 | 30 | 9 |
1332 | Now starting from the top could you say your first name, your age, why you are here and the name of your insurance company? | 1.2847 | 0.04480 | 144 | 109 | 29 | 6 |
1333 | Now, which of you is here to discuss your boundary issues? | 1.2846 | 0.04534 | 130 | 97 | 29 | 4 |
1334 | And why is it you don't feel special? | 1.2838 | 0.04701 | 148 | 115 | 24 | 9 |
1335 | Okay, now tell me about his childhood. | 1.2838 | 0.04501 | 148 | 113 | 28 | 7 |
1336 | Ok, Miss Top Bunk, how long have you had this feeling that you aren't being considered as a strong and independent individual by your peers at work ? | 1.2838 | 0.05077 | 148 | 119 | 16 | 13 |
1337 | Have you considered some alone time? | 1.2837 | 0.04190 | 141 | 104 | 34 | 3 |
1338 | Tell me about your mother. Tell me about your mother. Tell me about your mother. | 1.2828 | 0.04663 | 145 | 112 | 25 | 8 |
1339 | The sharing economy has entered therapy | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 111 | 27 | 7 |
1340 | And why do you think Goldilocks would choose your couch? | 1.2828 | 0.04663 | 145 | 112 | 25 | 8 |
1341 | So how did leaving Camp Winnie Tonga make you feel? | 1.2828 | 0.04118 | 145 | 107 | 35 | 3 |
1342 | you have been reclassified as dysbunktional | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1343 | Now close your eyes and imagine you can afford a one on one session. | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1344 | Now this will only work if we combine all your deductibles.. | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1345 | This is the first psychiatry triple-play outside of a ball park, so who's on first | 1.2828 | 0.04663 | 145 | 112 | 25 | 8 |
1346 | Though the others may hear you, I am the only one listening. | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 109 | 29 | 6 |
1347 | I understand, but it is the best way to handle the scheduling conflict. | 1.2828 | 0.04344 | 145 | 109 | 31 | 5 |
1348 | The folding chairs should be back from the shop next week. | 1.2828 | 0.04864 | 145 | 114 | 21 | 10 |
1349 | I want to schedule another session on Friday the 13th. Your thoughts? | 1.2828 | 0.04864 | 145 | 114 | 21 | 10 |
1350 | Which one of you farted? | 1.2828 | 0.04663 | 145 | 112 | 25 | 8 |
1351 | Kate, I'll put the ladder back once you really explore your anger towards the rest of your clique. | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 111 | 27 | 7 |
1352 | Picture yourself in an office with only one chaise longue | 1.2828 | 0.04233 | 145 | 108 | 33 | 4 |
1353 | The situation you are facing is multilayered and complex. | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 111 | 27 | 7 |
1354 | So...This is Us? | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 111 | 27 | 7 |
1355 | Remember, the three-for-one coupon is only good for one session. | 1.2828 | 0.04344 | 145 | 109 | 31 | 5 |
1356 | It's more efficient, I charge each of you a bit less, and you all have Mommy problems. | 1.2828 | 0.05151 | 145 | 117 | 15 | 13 |
1357 | Welcome to your student loan anxiety session. Shall we take it from the top down? | 1.2828 | 0.04663 | 145 | 112 | 25 | 8 |
1358 | Does anyone have the family coupon? | 1.2828 | 0.04962 | 145 | 115 | 19 | 11 |
1359 | Classic Middle Child Syndrome. | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1360 | Think of it as Uber ride sharing meets therapy. | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1361 | This *is* the recommended treatment now for multiple personality disorder. | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1362 | Is this anyone's first time in Groupon Therapy? | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1363 | Sorry, number 3, are you the one on suicide watch or is that number 2? Oops, times up everyone." | 1.2828 | 0.04765 | 145 | 115 | 20 | 10 |
1364 | So Eve, I’m glad you’ve brought in all three faces today. | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 111 | 27 | 7 |
1365 | I should tell you at the start that this is my first experiment with Groupon. | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1366 | You've all qualified for the group rate. | 1.2828 | 0.04663 | 145 | 112 | 25 | 8 |
1367 | tell me....what is it that has brought you all to tiers? | 1.2828 | 0.04962 | 145 | 115 | 19 | 11 |
1368 | Good news! Your insurance will cover 36 sessions | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1369 | You seem to share a sort of a bunker mentality. | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 111 | 27 | 7 |
1370 | Otto never caught on that each of his three personalities was being charged separately. | 1.2828 | 0.04765 | 145 | 113 | 23 | 9 |
1371 | You are in a safe place now. Whatever you say will be between me and the 3 of you. | 1.2828 | 0.04344 | 145 | 109 | 31 | 5 |
1372 | Which one of you was a middle child? | 1.2828 | 0.04233 | 145 | 108 | 33 | 4 |
1373 | To be fair the ad did say I’m three times more likely to be helpful than other therapists. | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 110 | 27 | 7 |
1374 | Family sessions improved a lot after I got rid of the Murphy beds. | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1375 | The age of Groupon | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1376 | New Federal Mental Health Guidelines give you each a 16.667 minute hour | 1.2828 | 0.04118 | 145 | 108 | 32 | 4 |
1377 | Here's my first insight. Get a better health insurance plan. | 1.2828 | 0.05057 | 145 | 116 | 17 | 12 |
1378 | You all need better HMOs. | 1.2828 | 0.04663 | 145 | 112 | 25 | 8 |
1379 | Lets start with how the choice-of-bunk fight started. | 1.2828 | 0.04663 | 145 | 112 | 25 | 8 |
1380 | So, you were telling me last time about how the sharing economy was crushing your sense of self. | 1.2828 | 0.04663 | 145 | 112 | 25 | 8 |
1381 | First off, I must apologize. This certainly was not what I meant when I told my secretary that all work must be submitted in triplicate. | 1.2828 | 0.04344 | 145 | 108 | 30 | 5 |
1382 | Bobby, tell me why you think Greg and Peter like to bully you. | 1.2828 | 0.04765 | 145 | 113 | 23 | 9 |
1383 | Bachelor #1, if on our first date I asked you about your mother, what would you say? | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 111 | 27 | 7 |
1384 | Your inner children want better insurance. | 1.2828 | 0.04962 | 145 | 115 | 19 | 11 |
1385 | I hope you will feel confident that everything we discuss will be kept confidential | 1.2828 | 0.04118 | 145 | 106 | 35 | 3 |
1386 | Alright and that’s our time. Grace, would you like the ladder or the trampoline today? | 1.2828 | 0.04765 | 145 | 113 | 23 | 9 |
1387 | When did these feelings of inadequacy and depression start at Camp Sunshine for you? | 1.2828 | 0.04453 | 145 | 110 | 29 | 6 |
1388 | So how long have you been fixated on being in a New Yorker cartoon about psychiatrists? | 1.2828 | 0.05057 | 145 | 116 | 17 | 12 |
1389 | My official diagnosis is acute multiple personality disorder. | 1.2828 | 0.04233 | 145 | 113 | 27 | 5 |
1390 | and as a plus, Medicare helps cure loneliness | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 111 | 27 | 7 |
1391 | So, I'm hearing that Ego is tired of always playing the middle man between Id and SuperEgo | 1.2828 | 0.04765 | 145 | 113 | 23 | 9 |
1392 | So, you have always had threesomes? | 1.2828 | 0.04233 | 145 | 108 | 33 | 4 |
1393 | I hope I'm not triggering any feelings of inferiority. It's just easier if I start from the top. | 1.2828 | 0.04864 | 145 | 114 | 21 | 10 |
1394 | How do you feel about time and space optimization? | 1.2828 | 0.04962 | 145 | 115 | 19 | 11 |
1395 | Well Gerald, we talked about this before, remember? Lindsey gets the top couch this time because Jeff is afraid of heights, and you had it last time. | 1.2828 | 0.04118 | 145 | 107 | 35 | 3 |
1396 | On the bottom is the id, the middle is the ego, then the super ego on the tippy top | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 111 | 27 | 7 |
1397 | On one hand, you sold your collective souls to come up with the blandest, most benign captions imaginable, but on the other hand, you've been selected as the three Finalists.... | 1.2828 | 0.04559 | 145 | 111 | 27 | 7 |
1398 | Let me know if you guys want to share a Kleenex. | 1.2828 | 0.04765 | 145 | 113 | 23 | 9 |
1399 | My clients are really starting to pile up. | 1.2826 | 0.04598 | 138 | 105 | 27 | 6 |
1400 | Now try to synchronize your identical whining” | 1.2826 | 0.05142 | 138 | 110 | 17 | 11 |
1401 | How did you think Bernie was going to pay for it?! | 1.2817 | 0.04934 | 142 | 112 | 20 | 10 |
1402 | ENROLL TWO IN THERAPY, GET ONE FREE. | 1.2817 | 0.04727 | 142 | 110 | 24 | 8 |
1403 | This is what Medicare for all looks like , middle child /low self-esteem group 452B | 1.2808 | 0.05120 | 146 | 118 | 15 | 13 |
1404 | Medicare for All! | 1.2808 | 0.05026 | 146 | 117 | 17 | 12 |
1405 | Of course you have three different personalities. You are three different people. | 1.2807 | 0.05063 | 114 | 87 | 22 | 5 |
1406 | It’s a new approach to group therapy. | 1.2791 | 0.04666 | 129 | 98 | 26 | 5 |
1407 | No, it wasn’t “group therapy” it was Groupon. | 1.2786 | 0.04427 | 140 | 106 | 29 | 5 |
1408 | Any thoughts on how you stack up together? | 1.2786 | 0.04541 | 140 | 107 | 27 | 6 |
1409 | One more time, let’s take it from the top. | 1.2786 | 0.04869 | 140 | 111 | 17 | 9 |
1410 | Welcome to Basic Economy psychotherapy. | 1.2786 | 0.04653 | 140 | 108 | 25 | 7 |
1411 | I believe you all have separation anxiety. | 1.2786 | 0.04762 | 140 | 109 | 23 | 8 |
1412 | Bachelor #2, if I were your Mom, where would you take me oa a date? | 1.2786 | 0.04869 | 140 | 110 | 21 | 9 |
1413 | If I told you once I told you a million times: you're stuck in this co-dependent relationship because you don't respect personal boundaries, not one of you really listens to me, and after seven years as your therapist, frankly I'm sick of it. | 1.2786 | 0.04762 | 140 | 109 | 23 | 8 |
1414 | I understand there is a problem with your position in life. | 1.2786 | 0.04541 | 140 | 107 | 27 | 6 |
1415 | My three for one deal was not literal." | 1.2786 | 0.04653 | 140 | 108 | 25 | 7 |
1416 | OK, now that you understand the vagaries of our tiered pricing, we can proceed with the resultant level of care. | 1.2786 | 0.04427 | 140 | 106 | 29 | 5 |
1417 | I can see that there are levels to your grief. | 1.2786 | 0.04188 | 140 | 104 | 33 | 3 |
1418 | My methods are hard to debunk. | 1.2786 | 0.04869 | 140 | 110 | 21 | 9 |
1419 | I typically avoid group-based approaches to acute personality disorder therapy, but it was on sale at IKEA. | 1.2786 | 0.04541 | 140 | 109 | 24 | 7 |
1420 | I wondered why you clarified that your problems started at "birth, with an I" when I agreed to take you on as a patient. | 1.2786 | 0.05076 | 140 | 112 | 17 | 11 |
1421 | Please. One at a time. | 1.2786 | 0.04309 | 140 | 105 | 31 | 4 |
1422 | As patients, it's important to see how you stack up | 1.2786 | 0.04869 | 140 | 110 | 21 | 9 |
1423 | So I see we have some separation anxiety. | 1.2786 | 0.04188 | 140 | 104 | 33 | 3 |
1424 | Let's see how your so-called issues stack up.” | 1.2786 | 0.04762 | 140 | 109 | 23 | 8 |
1425 | I am starting to wonder whether this is worth doing to get the group rate. | 1.2786 | 0.04762 | 140 | 109 | 23 | 8 |
1426 | For that kind of guidance, Mr. Wilkins, you’d have to upgrade to first class. | 1.2786 | 0.04653 | 140 | 108 | 25 | 7 |
1427 | You should see this place when the cast of "Friends" shows up. | 1.2786 | 0.04762 | 140 | 109 | 23 | 8 |
1428 | No, I was not aware you all know each other | 1.2786 | 0.04188 | 140 | 104 | 33 | 3 |
1429 | Are all your private activities 3-way? | 1.2786 | 0.04974 | 140 | 111 | 19 | 10 |
1430 | You have a single personality disorder. | 1.2786 | 0.04541 | 140 | 107 | 27 | 6 |
1431 | Tell me what you're feeling. Tell me what you're feeling. Tell me what you're feeling. | 1.2786 | 0.04869 | 140 | 110 | 21 | 9 |
1432 | It’s not multiple personality disorder, you actually are three separate people. | 1.2774 | 0.04717 | 137 | 106 | 24 | 7 |
1433 | My training? Camp counselor. | 1.2774 | 0.04238 | 137 | 102 | 32 | 3 |
1434 | Yes, even if you remain silent throughout the session you are still responsible for 33.33% payment. | 1.2774 | 0.04602 | 137 | 105 | 26 | 6 |
1435 | I've noticed that trouble comes in threes. | 1.2774 | 0.04484 | 137 | 104 | 28 | 5 |
1436 | Simon says arms to your side. Hold your hands on your stomach. | 1.2774 | 0.04717 | 137 | 106 | 24 | 7 |
1437 | So you're not happy with your position in life. What would you change? | 1.2774 | 0.04602 | 137 | 105 | 26 | 6 |
1438 | Yes, it's a metaphor. I just haven't figured out which one. | 1.2774 | 0.04363 | 137 | 103 | 30 | 4 |
1439 | Multiple personality disorder is usually not so obvious. | 1.2774 | 0.04484 | 137 | 104 | 28 | 5 |
1440 | Do you think that on some level... | 1.2774 | 0.04484 | 137 | 103 | 28 | 5 |
1441 | Ugly is obvious, but which one of you identifies as the Good or the Bad? | 1.2774 | 0.04717 | 137 | 106 | 24 | 7 |
1442 | Even worse, your insurance company cut your hour to 41 minutes. | 1.2759 | 0.04536 | 145 | 112 | 26 | 7 |
1443 | So that's what, fifteen personalities in total? | 1.2754 | 0.04456 | 138 | 105 | 28 | 5 |
1444 | Nobody leaves until we finish debunking. | 1.2754 | 0.04687 | 138 | 107 | 24 | 7 |
1445 | You played the young versions of the main characters on ‘This is Us’, and now you can’t be apart? | 1.2754 | 0.04908 | 138 | 109 | 20 | 9 |
1446 | Don't worry, I'll still pretend your issues are unique. | 1.2754 | 0.04908 | 138 | 109 | 20 | 9 |
1447 | Of course this is how you do family therapy! | 1.2754 | 0.04456 | 138 | 105 | 28 | 5 |
1448 | I might have an idea as to why you feel caught in the middle of Sue and Carl's relationship. | 1.2754 | 0.04335 | 138 | 104 | 30 | 4 |
1449 | Next time, please make separate appointments for each of your personalities. | 1.2754 | 0.04456 | 138 | 105 | 28 | 5 |
1450 | Technically, this is “group therapy”. | 1.2754 | 0.04212 | 138 | 103 | 32 | 3 |
1451 | My first question to all of you - is the market place working when looking for healthcare providers?” | 1.2754 | 0.04687 | 138 | 107 | 24 | 7 |
1452 | It's your mom's fault. | 1.2754 | 0.04687 | 138 | 107 | 24 | 7 |
1453 | OK...today let's work on your tri-polar disorder | 1.2754 | 0.04335 | 138 | 104 | 30 | 4 |
1454 | So tell me, each of you, when did you first have this experience of being a club sandwich? | 1.2754 | 0.04456 | 138 | 107 | 24 | 6 |
1455 | Any other comments on that fourth-grade teacher? | 1.2754 | 0.04799 | 138 | 108 | 22 | 8 |
1456 | Medicare allows for a 20 minute consult. I charge by the hour. You three split the bill, ok? | 1.2754 | 0.04212 | 138 | 103 | 32 | 3 |
1457 | Tell me about your unresolved summer camp issues. | 1.2754 | 0.05014 | 138 | 110 | 18 | 10 |
1458 | Groupon is saving my practice. | 1.2754 | 0.04687 | 138 | 107 | 24 | 7 |
1459 | So, how do you like your Groupons? | 1.2754 | 0.05014 | 138 | 110 | 18 | 10 |
1460 | Indeed, triplets from three different parents do offer some challenges. | 1.2754 | 0.04456 | 138 | 105 | 28 | 5 |
1461 | To answer your questions: yes, no, and hmm... | 1.2754 | 0.04573 | 138 | 106 | 26 | 6 |
1462 | I see your family is very into sharing. | 1.2754 | 0.05014 | 138 | 110 | 18 | 10 |
1463 | Now you see the downside, of "Medicare for All." | 1.2754 | 0.04687 | 138 | 107 | 24 | 7 |
1464 | I’d like to welcome you to our new rack ‘em and stack ‘em therapy group. | 1.2754 | 0.04573 | 138 | 106 | 26 | 6 |
1465 | These feelings are completely normal. Just not for you, Dave. | 1.2754 | 0.04799 | 138 | 108 | 22 | 8 |
1466 | Family sharing only works for Spotify dad... | 1.2754 | 0.05014 | 138 | 110 | 18 | 10 |
1467 | The darker skin person has the least head room. Tell me how that makes you feel. | 1.2754 | 0.04456 | 138 | 105 | 28 | 5 |
1468 | So I hear you all have issues with sandwiches? | 1.2754 | 0.04799 | 138 | 108 | 22 | 8 |
1469 | For some reason none of you have responded to group therapy. | 1.2754 | 0.04573 | 138 | 106 | 26 | 6 |
1470 | Welcome to your inital session with the Groupon discount. | 1.2754 | 0.04799 | 138 | 108 | 22 | 8 |
1471 | If you could pay cash, I'd give you a regular couch. | 1.2754 | 0.05014 | 138 | 110 | 18 | 10 |
1472 | This isn't what I had in mind when I suggested having a threesome. | 1.2754 | 0.04573 | 138 | 106 | 26 | 6 |
1473 | These open marriages rarely work out. | 1.2754 | 0.04084 | 138 | 102 | 34 | 2 |
1474 | You all need to work on finding your own voice. | 1.2754 | 0.04456 | 138 | 105 | 28 | 5 |
1475 | my rate is per hour and bunk | 1.2754 | 0.04573 | 138 | 106 | 26 | 6 |
1476 | None of you are leaving until we get our timing right. AGAIN. Top bunk: 'Row, row, row your boat...' | 1.2754 | 0.04687 | 138 | 107 | 24 | 7 |
1477 | In all honesty, a ménage a trois is just never easy. | 1.2754 | 0.04456 | 138 | 108 | 24 | 6 |
1478 | So that very afternoon, a new psychosis was discovered. For they experience the same illusions. The new DSM: “Mirage a Trois.” | 1.2754 | 0.04573 | 138 | 106 | 26 | 6 |
1479 | A whole new meaning to group therapy! | 1.2754 | 0.04456 | 138 | 105 | 28 | 5 |
1480 | Some call it overbooking. I personally prefer 'group therapy'. | 1.2754 | 0.04335 | 138 | 104 | 30 | 4 |
1481 | So what is the problem in the entourage? | 1.2754 | 0.05014 | 138 | 110 | 18 | 10 |
1482 | It feels like all my appointments keep stacking up | 1.2754 | 0.04908 | 138 | 109 | 20 | 9 |
1483 | Therapy-share isn't for everyone, but I do try to match up psychoses. | 1.2754 | 0.04573 | 138 | 106 | 26 | 6 |
1484 | Before we begin, which one of you has the three-for-one coupon? | 1.2754 | 0.04573 | 138 | 106 | 26 | 6 |
1485 | Remind me again, which one of you identifies as Shemp? | 1.2754 | 0.04799 | 138 | 108 | 22 | 8 |
1486 | You may like our triple threat package: acrophobia, enochlophobia and claustrophobia. I'll throw in hypochondria for free. | 1.2727 | 0.04821 | 132 | 103 | 22 | 7 |
1487 | Maybe you should try sleeping together. | 1.2727 | 0.04699 | 132 | 102 | 24 | 6 |
1488 | He doesnt really need the helmet at that altitude | 1.2721 | 0.05056 | 136 | 109 | 17 | 10 |
1489 | So, Helen, have you always felt superior being on top? | 1.2721 | 0.04362 | 136 | 105 | 23 | 6 |
1490 | First off, I'd like to welcome you all to your first Groupon polyamorous three-for-one discount session. | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 6 |
1491 | Clients,just a reminder: as we test out this innovative pilot for saving health care delivery costs,please try not to free-associate all at one time." | 1.2721 | 0.04947 | 136 | 108 | 19 | 9 |
1492 | We'll start with fear of heights, then fear of enclosed spaces, then fear of being last." | 1.2721 | 0.04362 | 136 | 103 | 29 | 4 |
1493 | Now we commence the mind-meld. | 1.2721 | 0.04947 | 136 | 108 | 19 | 9 |
1494 | Yes Carol, from up there everyone does seem small. | 1.2721 | 0.05369 | 136 | 112 | 11 | 12 |
1495 | This Medicare-for-all does take a little getting used to. | 1.2721 | 0.04235 | 136 | 102 | 31 | 3 |
1496 | First let me explain multiple personality syndrome ..... | 1.2721 | 0.05056 | 136 | 109 | 17 | 9 |
1497 | Hopefully this group therapy session will help you all get over your fear of bunk beds. | 1.2721 | 0.04485 | 136 | 104 | 27 | 5 |
1498 | Now again let’s hear it from the top! | 1.2721 | 0.04836 | 136 | 107 | 21 | 8 |
1499 | Let’s begin. I have a stacked schedule this afternoon. | 1.2721 | 0.04362 | 136 | 103 | 29 | 4 |
1500 | How long have you had this compassion for Oreo cookies? | 1.2721 | 0.04836 | 136 | 107 | 21 | 8 |
1501 | I'm prescribing you tricyclic antidepressants. | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1502 | What we lose in confidentiality, we make up for in anonymity. | 1.2721 | 0.04605 | 136 | 105 | 25 | 6 |
1503 | I didn’t think this is what they meant by group therapy. | 1.2721 | 0.04485 | 136 | 104 | 27 | 5 |
1504 | Families in therapy are often moved to tiers. | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1505 | OK, so, let me get this straight - which one of you is the third wheel? | 1.2721 | 0.04362 | 136 | 103 | 29 | 4 |
1506 | You may be a family who needs intervention, but you do not get a 3 for 1 discount . . . | 1.2721 | 0.04362 | 136 | 103 | 29 | 4 |
1507 | When did you first experience these feelings toward Groupon? | 1.2721 | 0.04605 | 136 | 105 | 25 | 6 |
1508 | Healthcare under Bernie. | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1509 | And when, exactly, did you become aware that you might have multiple personalities? | 1.2721 | 0.04171 | 136 | 103 | 28 | 4 |
1510 | How long have you lived in your tiny house? | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1511 | No , I'm afraid there is no discount for Multiple Personality Disorder. | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1512 | Remember, only 1/3 of my advice applies to you. 1 | 1.2721 | 0.04362 | 136 | 103 | 29 | 4 |
1513 | So this is Medicare for all! | 1.2721 | 0.04947 | 136 | 108 | 19 | 9 |
1514 | Group rates don't cover individual phobias | 1.2721 | 0.04836 | 136 | 107 | 21 | 8 |
1515 | First the bad news, you are not triplets. | 1.2721 | 0.04235 | 136 | 102 | 31 | 3 |
1516 | So, nobody wants to be Id today? | 1.2721 | 0.04485 | 136 | 104 | 27 | 5 |
1517 | Sorry, I am backed up today. But at least you know you are not alone. | 1.2721 | 0.04485 | 136 | 104 | 27 | 5 |
1518 | I can see that you’re dealing with stress on multiple levels. | 1.2721 | 0.04485 | 136 | 104 | 27 | 5 |
1519 | Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, okay Fred, you’re turn. | 1.2721 | 0.05056 | 136 | 109 | 17 | 10 |
1520 | Trickle down therapy. | 1.2721 | 0.04605 | 136 | 105 | 25 | 6 |
1521 | It’s understandable, especially confronting long repressed summer camp fears. | 1.2721 | 0.04947 | 136 | 108 | 19 | 9 |
1522 | Okay, let's start with the resentment you're feeling over who got the bottom bunk. | 1.2721 | 0.04235 | 136 | 102 | 31 | 3 |
1523 | You've been away from your cell phones for over 10 minutes now...how's everyone feeling?" | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1524 | Welcome to your Buy Two, Get One Free Groupon Therapy Session. | 1.2721 | 0.04605 | 136 | 105 | 25 | 6 |
1525 | I've seen this before, I call it the "Larry, Curly & Moe" Syndrome. | 1.2721 | 0.05056 | 136 | 109 | 17 | 10 |
1526 | So...let's talk about camp. | 1.2721 | 0.04947 | 136 | 108 | 19 | 9 |
1527 | What else bothers you about low Medicare reimbursements? | 1.2721 | 0.04836 | 136 | 107 | 21 | 8 |
1528 | Karen, I need you to be more supportive. | 1.2721 | 0.04836 | 136 | 107 | 21 | 8 |
1529 | Thank you for participating in our group therapy pilot study. Please discuss how you feel about your mothers among yourselves. | 1.2721 | 0.05056 | 136 | 109 | 17 | 10 |
1530 | It gets busy during an election year. | 1.2721 | 0.04947 | 136 | 108 | 19 | 9 |
1531 | So with the group rate, you all speak at the same time and I'll listen to the person with the most interesting issues. | 1.2721 | 0.04485 | 136 | 104 | 27 | 5 |
1532 | Welcome to 'Medicare for all'. You each have 30 seconds to describe your symptoms. | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1533 | Groupon Group therapy | 1.2721 | 0.04362 | 136 | 103 | 29 | 4 |
1534 | Have you ever thought life might be stacked against you? | 1.2721 | 0.04605 | 136 | 105 | 25 | 6 |
1535 | Maslow's Hierarchy doesn't work like this and I hope I've made it clear you're each being charged individually." | 1.2721 | 0.04362 | 136 | 103 | 28 | 4 |
1536 | No, for the last time, we do not offer a group discount. | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1537 | Just because you're on top, Id, doesn't mean you have to keep trashing Ego and Superego. | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1538 | Again, to be clear, no separate checks. | 1.2721 | 0.04605 | 136 | 105 | 25 | 6 |
1539 | Okay -- what level did we leave off on last week? | 1.2721 | 0.04235 | 136 | 102 | 31 | 3 |
1540 | To summarize, Jane, you are experiencing feelings of being on top of the world, Ken, you have anxiety about not being able to break out from the middle of the pack and Tom, you can't seem to shake the feeling of always ending up on the bottom rung? | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1541 | From here on out, I'm going to do all the talking. | 1.2721 | 0.04947 | 136 | 108 | 19 | 9 |
1542 | This time watch your b flats. | 1.2721 | 0.04836 | 136 | 107 | 21 | 8 |
1543 | Yes, there is a someone between you two. | 1.2721 | 0.04235 | 136 | 102 | 31 | 3 |
1544 | Welcome to the beta test of the new Therapy Share app. | 1.2721 | 0.04836 | 136 | 107 | 21 | 8 |
1545 | I find this therapy works best for patients in parallel universes. | 1.2721 | 0.04947 | 136 | 108 | 19 | 9 |
1546 | I understand that being Mr. Trump’s aide can break your psyche, but not like this. | 1.2721 | 0.04836 | 136 | 107 | 21 | 8 |
1547 | No, you're not the only one who feels this way. | 1.2721 | 0.04235 | 136 | 102 | 31 | 3 |
1548 | When did you first hear about high-rise syndrome? | 1.2721 | 0.04836 | 136 | 107 | 21 | 8 |
1549 | Wow! This runs deep. Let's start at the top and work our way down. | 1.2721 | 0.04605 | 136 | 105 | 25 | 6 |
1550 | Christie, Paul, Bill, you wanted the discount rate, so pay attention and learn from each other. | 1.2721 | 0.04605 | 136 | 105 | 25 | 6 |
1551 | Let's not all talk at once. | 1.2721 | 0.04235 | 136 | 103 | 23 | 4 |
1552 | We're now streamlining all of the cartoons featuring psychiatrists' offices. | 1.2721 | 0.05369 | 136 | 112 | 11 | 13 |
1553 | Yes, " I guess you could liken it to musical chairs". | 1.2721 | 0.04485 | 136 | 104 | 27 | 5 |
1554 | Please explain why you feel your ménage à trois needs to join Co-Dependency Anonymous? | 1.2721 | 0.05267 | 136 | 111 | 13 | 12 |
1555 | So then, going from top to bottom: don’t be afraid of heights, stop feeling so boxed in, and your outlook won’t always be this low. | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1556 | Believe it or not, you're not alone in feeling that way. | 1.2721 | 0.04722 | 136 | 106 | 23 | 7 |
1557 | So to recap, I've got one superiority complex, one inferiority complex and you in the middle suffering from both? | 1.2721 | 0.04836 | 136 | 107 | 21 | 8 |
1558 | You've all opted for the group rate. How does that make you feel? | 1.2721 | 0.04605 | 136 | 105 | 25 | 6 |
1559 | Who's gonna level with me? | 1.2714 | 0.04161 | 140 | 105 | 32 | 3 |
1560 | Let's see. Last week we left off with Alice telling Elijah that she's carrying his baby and Elijah saying that he's still in love with Jack, but Jack said he's moving to Miami with Ramona, who gets out of prison next month. Who'd like to go first? | 1.2707 | 0.04668 | 133 | 103 | 24 | 6 |
1561 | Raise your hand if you agree that the Groupon fine print agreement was another in a long history of betrayals? | 1.2707 | 0.04544 | 133 | 102 | 26 | 5 |
1562 | Perhaps you’re right. Try it with the acrophobic on the bottom and the claustrophobic up top. | 1.2703 | 0.04351 | 148 | 114 | 28 | 6 |
1563 | I’m Dr. Smith and I’ll be your summer camp counselor. | 1.2701 | 0.04457 | 137 | 105 | 27 | 5 |
1564 | Although middle patients often feel they receive less attention, I try my best to charge you all equally. | 1.2701 | 0.04804 | 137 | 108 | 21 | 8 |
1565 | Hey, no more grousing about Medicare for All, okay? | 1.2701 | 0.04457 | 137 | 105 | 27 | 5 |
1566 | So who was the one with gender reassignment issues? | 1.2701 | 0.04457 | 137 | 108 | 21 | 6 |
1567 | Okay, you guys start by babbling about your respective childhoods and at the end of the hour the fee is split three ways. | 1.2701 | 0.04576 | 137 | 106 | 25 | 6 |
1568 | And how do you feel about that? Anyone can answer. | 1.2692 | 0.04055 | 130 | 96 | 33 | 1 |
1569 | Your issue has different levels. | 1.2679 | 0.04909 | 112 | 86 | 22 | 4 |
1570 | This is my first counseling all members of a menage a trois arrangement. | 1.2672 | 0.05290 | 131 | 107 | 13 | 11 |
1571 | So after 'Need You Now' reached number 1, you must have been lot of pressure to write a follow-up. I'd like to explore how that made you feel... | 1.2672 | 0.04945 | 131 | 104 | 19 | 8 |
1572 | Sorry but we had to make some adjustment because of new provisions in your healthcare plan. | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1573 | You all need your heads examined if you think I'm billing this for a single person visit. | 1.2672 | 0.04825 | 131 | 103 | 21 | 7 |
1574 | It sounds like you feel you’re not getting enough personal attention. | 1.2672 | 0.04702 | 131 | 102 | 23 | 6 |
1575 | Tell me why you're feeling stuck in the middle. | 1.2672 | 0.04445 | 131 | 100 | 27 | 4 |
1576 | "We've heard enough from you now, Id. Superego, can we check in with you? | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1577 | So, whose idea was it to have the threesome? | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1578 | Ok, so let’s take it from the top. | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1579 | And who are we today? | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1580 | Mr. Middleman, why do you always choose the second bunk? | 1.2672 | 0.04311 | 131 | 98 | 29 | 2 |
1581 | Again, now: what part of family therapy are you all having a problem with? | 1.2672 | 0.04445 | 131 | 100 | 27 | 4 |
1582 | This isn't what I expected when she recommended group therapy. | 1.2672 | 0.04702 | 131 | 102 | 23 | 6 |
1583 | I'm only asking you to tri it just this once. | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1584 | I am pleased to announce that today's session is made possible by the Ikea Group Therapy Stacking Initiative. | 1.2672 | 0.04702 | 131 | 102 | 23 | 6 |
1585 | Socialization 2020 | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1586 | I have many patients but know I'm focusing on you individually. | 1.2672 | 0.04445 | 131 | 100 | 27 | 4 |
1587 | How was your train trip through Europe? | 1.2672 | 0.04702 | 131 | 102 | 23 | 6 |
1588 | You're all nuts. | 1.2672 | 0.04702 | 131 | 102 | 23 | 6 |
1589 | Yes, I am in this for the money. | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1590 | Well, there is actually one monster above your bed too. We can make them go away, but that will then be $300 per hour. | 1.2672 | 0.04445 | 131 | 100 | 27 | 4 |
1591 | Because I deal with the collective unconscious. | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1592 | Welcome to Trump Anxiety Daycamp, the therapy session began when i removed the stepladder". | 1.2672 | 0.04311 | 131 | 101 | 26 | 4 |
1593 | Suffice it to say, the current administration has led to an increase in anxiety. | 1.2672 | 0.04825 | 131 | 103 | 21 | 7 |
1594 | Now I see what you meant by "hover parents" | 1.2672 | 0.04445 | 131 | 102 | 24 | 4 |
1595 | Let’s start by debunking some psychotherapy tropes... | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1596 | Why do you feel like you aren't getting enough attention? | 1.2672 | 0.04702 | 131 | 102 | 23 | 6 |
1597 | Remind me, which of you has middle child syndrome? | 1.2672 | 0.04445 | 131 | 100 | 27 | 4 |
1598 | You may have slept your way to the top, Catherine, but you’re going to have to get down with self-love. | 1.2672 | 0.05063 | 131 | 105 | 17 | 9 |
1599 | It was clearly stated - 'No split bills' | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1600 | One at a time ! | 1.2672 | 0.04445 | 131 | 105 | 21 | 4 |
1601 | Why the bunk sofa? It's called group therapy, and if I hear my mom was so mean, one more time I'm gonna shoot myself. | 1.2672 | 0.04702 | 131 | 102 | 23 | 6 |
1602 | Acrophobia, claustrophobia, and Glenn, I'll see you next Tuesday. | 1.2672 | 0.04445 | 131 | 100 | 27 | 4 |
1603 | For anonymity's sake, I'm going to call you Acro, Claustro, and Agora. | 1.2672 | 0.05399 | 131 | 108 | 11 | 12 |
1604 | On the bright side, you're not so alone that you couldn't use the Groupon. | 1.2672 | 0.04702 | 131 | 102 | 23 | 6 |
1605 | I, too, am worried the FRIENDS reboot won’t stack up, but let’s be reasonable here... | 1.2672 | 0.05177 | 131 | 106 | 15 | 10 |
1606 | First, please remember that many throuples find therapy helpful. | 1.2672 | 0.04575 | 131 | 101 | 25 | 5 |
1607 | HMO-sponsored studies prove it's very effective. | 1.2667 | 0.04929 | 105 | 80 | 22 | 3 |
1608 | This insurance clause is new to me too. | 1.2656 | 0.04503 | 128 | 98 | 26 | 4 |
1609 | I am now allowed only 15 inches between patients. | 1.2656 | 0.04638 | 128 | 99 | 24 | 5 |
1610 | Simon says cross your legs”. | 1.2656 | 0.04638 | 128 | 99 | 24 | 5 |
1611 | Welcome to "Medical Care for All" | 1.2656 | 0.04896 | 128 | 101 | 20 | 7 |
1612 | OK. We got you off of the cruise ship. you're no longer in quarantine. What is keeping you in your bunks? | 1.2656 | 0.04896 | 128 | 101 | 20 | 7 |
1613 | I find it more efficient to analyze all your alter egos at the same time. | 1.2656 | 0.04769 | 128 | 100 | 22 | 6 |
1614 | I think we'll need to get your mother in here. | 1.2656 | 0.04638 | 128 | 99 | 24 | 5 |
1615 | I'd like you to speak with one voice. | 1.2656 | 0.04503 | 128 | 98 | 26 | 4 |
1616 | Now close your eyes, and imagine that your HMO had better coverage. | 1.2656 | 0.04638 | 128 | 99 | 24 | 5 |
1617 | - How are we doing today? | 1.2656 | 0.04638 | 128 | 99 | 24 | 5 |
1618 | I'm here to help you with the transition from incarceration to normal life. | 1.2656 | 0.04365 | 128 | 97 | 28 | 3 |
1619 | Well, that concludes your carpool therapy session. | 1.2656 | 0.04365 | 128 | 97 | 28 | 3 |
1620 | Let's start at the beginning, tell me about the Uber Pool... | 1.2656 | 0.04503 | 128 | 98 | 26 | 4 |
1621 | Since you have multiple personalities, I’ll have to bill each separately. | 1.2656 | 0.04503 | 128 | 98 | 26 | 4 |
1622 | When I ask a question the first person to raise their hand gets to answer first. There will be no more talking at the same time. Is that understood. Now, what seems to be the problem? | 1.2656 | 0.04769 | 128 | 99 | 22 | 6 |
1623 | Agoraphobic, please switch bunks with Fear of Heights. | 1.2656 | 0.04769 | 128 | 100 | 22 | 6 |
1624 | My "Short Stack" therapy concept came to me as an undergrad working at I-Hop. | 1.2652 | 0.04670 | 132 | 103 | 23 | 6 |
1625 | Does being stuck in the middle bring up any feelings? | 1.2640 | 0.05223 | 125 | 101 | 15 | 9 |
1626 | tell your inner child,no jumping on the bunk bed | 1.2636 | 0.04194 | 129 | 100 | 22 | 4 |
1627 | Ok, let’s see if I can “debunk” these problems. | 1.2636 | 0.04736 | 129 | 101 | 22 | 6 |
1628 | Now some people aren't as comfortable with group therapy, but the research shows it's quite effective. | 1.2636 | 0.04607 | 129 | 100 | 24 | 5 |
1629 | My Financial Planner told me it was a good way to increase my hourly rate." | 1.2636 | 0.04862 | 129 | 102 | 20 | 7 |
1630 | OK, let's take it from the top. | 1.2636 | 0.04736 | 129 | 101 | 22 | 6 |
1631 | Groupon therapy. | 1.2636 | 0.04862 | 129 | 102 | 20 | 7 |
1632 | Now, let’s not all talk at once | 1.2636 | 0.04736 | 129 | 101 | 22 | 6 |
1633 | Primarily, I feel we must address the unusual verticality of your family system... | 1.2636 | 0.04985 | 129 | 103 | 18 | 8 |
1634 | I think that you are in denial about trying to sleep your way to the top.” | 1.2636 | 0.05105 | 129 | 104 | 16 | 9 |
1635 | How do you feel about group psychotherapy as a form of after-school detention? | 1.2636 | 0.04736 | 129 | 101 | 22 | 6 |
1636 | Why label it a bizarre love triangle? Maybe it’s a garden-variety love triangle. | 1.2636 | 0.04736 | 129 | 101 | 22 | 6 |
1637 | When did you first notice you were missing a fourth for bridge? | 1.2636 | 0.04607 | 129 | 100 | 24 | 5 |
1638 | It would be a lot more fun if you could complain about your parents in three part harmony. | 1.2636 | 0.05105 | 129 | 104 | 16 | 9 |
1639 | Your first problem? You gave the kid the bottom bunk. | 1.2636 | 0.04473 | 129 | 99 | 26 | 4 |
1640 | And remember: when counseling Economy Class, each piece of personal baggage is an additional $40. | 1.2636 | 0.04985 | 129 | 103 | 18 | 8 |
1641 | It all started at summer camp... | 1.2636 | 0.04985 | 129 | 103 | 18 | 8 |
1642 | Which one of you is afraid of heights? | 1.2636 | 0.04336 | 129 | 98 | 28 | 3 |
1643 | Tell me more about your father’s Groupon compulsion. | 1.2636 | 0.05450 | 129 | 107 | 10 | 12 |
1644 | Do you feel you can now change the light bulb, Lisa? | 1.2636 | 0.04473 | 129 | 99 | 26 | 4 |
1645 | So - band camp traumas. Let's explore that. | 1.2636 | 0.04736 | 129 | 101 | 22 | 6 |
1646 | #1 ... what is the problem from your viewpoint? | 1.2636 | 0.04336 | 129 | 98 | 28 | 3 |
1647 | Brings new meaning to Group Therapy! | 1.2636 | 0.05337 | 129 | 106 | 12 | 11 |
1648 | We shared an Uber too. | 1.2636 | 0.04862 | 129 | 102 | 20 | 7 |
1649 | I got the idea after staying at an Air BNB. | 1.2636 | 0.04607 | 129 | 100 | 24 | 5 |
1650 | Well I see your multiple personality disorder has progressed since last visit. | 1.2636 | 0.04336 | 129 | 98 | 28 | 3 |
1651 | So, welcome to our first "Mental Health for All" session. | 1.2636 | 0.04862 | 129 | 102 | 19 | 7 |
1652 | So, which one of you is the evil triplet? | 1.2628 | 0.04428 | 137 | 106 | 26 | 5 |
1653 | Your Uber Pool ride is here now - see you next time. | 1.2628 | 0.04306 | 137 | 105 | 28 | 4 |
1654 | I want to help you lead a more dormal life. | 1.2619 | 0.04805 | 126 | 99 | 21 | 6 |
1655 | I need you to hear me. Friends accepted by different colleges are not the same as triplets separated at birth. | 1.2619 | 0.04390 | 126 | 96 | 27 | 3 |
1656 | So you think there are people above and below you? | 1.2615 | 0.04443 | 130 | 102 | 23 | 5 |
1657 | You exhibit multiple personalities in disorder - not a multiple personality disorder. | 1.2615 | 0.04443 | 130 | 100 | 26 | 4 |
1658 | Let's talk about your fear of being alone. | 1.2602 | 0.04876 | 123 | 97 | 20 | 6 |
1659 | I see we have multiple personalities. | 1.2598 | 0.04900 | 127 | 101 | 19 | 7 |
1660 | Let me bring in a couple of colleagues. | 1.2583 | 0.04807 | 120 | 94 | 21 | 5 |
1661 | It’s OK, my background is in multiple personalities. | 1.2583 | 0.05090 | 120 | 96 | 17 | 7 |
1662 | And how does that make you, and you, and you feel? | 1.2583 | 0.04659 | 120 | 93 | 23 | 4 |
1663 | Did we really need this maze now that we have flying rats. scientist2: damn right | 1.2581 | 0.05105 | 124 | 100 | 16 | 8 |
1664 | I know you think this a lot of bunk. | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1665 | None of you read the Groupon fine print? | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1666 | You seem to have problems on so many levels! | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1667 | So is this a trio, a troika, or a menage a trois? | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 99 | 18 | 7 |
1668 | And with time you may come to joyful acceptance that a menage a quatre was truly an overly aspirational goal... | 1.2581 | 0.05476 | 124 | 103 | 10 | 11 |
1669 | I think you meant to order a Therapist X. This is Therapist Pool. | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1670 | How about we start at the top . | 1.2581 | 0.04265 | 124 | 94 | 28 | 2 |
1671 | Welcome to Uber Therapy Share. | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 98 | 18 | 7 |
1672 | Progress! We've got you down to three distinct personalities. | 1.2581 | 0.04265 | 124 | 94 | 28 | 2 |
1673 | The Groupon didn’t specify individual therapy, only 50 minutes with a licensed therapist. | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1674 | So, when did you begin to feel you weren’t special? | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1675 | You know I'm still going to charge you all full price, right? | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1676 | Fine! I get three people with one personality. | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 99 | 18 | 7 |
1677 | Two in three people feel they're beneath someone. | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1678 | Yada, yada, yada. | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1679 | Keep in mind that you’re each saving 33 per cent on this session dealing with your miserliness. | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1680 | Why can't we ever just come over mom? | 1.2581 | 0.04416 | 124 | 95 | 26 | 3 |
1681 | How did you hear about about the Groupon? | 1.2581 | 0.04265 | 124 | 94 | 28 | 2 |
1682 | It looks like you have reached the tipping point. | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 23 | 4 |
1683 | It’s only the primary, and yet, we’re so distressed. | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1684 | Just a reminder, calling shotgun next session will not guarantee you the top bunk. | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1685 | I didn't mean health care for all at the same time. | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 99 | 18 | 7 |
1686 | Volume is the only way to make it pay these days. | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1687 | I've made my practice scalable to handle increased market demands since the 2016 election. | 1.2581 | 0.04265 | 124 | 94 | 28 | 2 |
1688 | Patient number three, describe your best therapy session. | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 99 | 18 | 7 |
1689 | Obviously, we aren’t seeing eye to eye on any of these issues. | 1.2581 | 0.04416 | 124 | 95 | 26 | 3 |
1690 | Shared ride chaining allows us to use the open seats in the car to their full advantage. As a passenger, you may be paired with multiple riders along your route. | 1.2581 | 0.05476 | 124 | 103 | 10 | 11 |
1691 | So, who’d like to go first and explain to me exactly what happened on that train-couchette in France last summer? | 1.2581 | 0.05105 | 124 | 100 | 16 | 8 |
1692 | That’s a bunch of bunk. | 1.2581 | 0.04265 | 124 | 94 | 28 | 2 |
1693 | It was definitely the full moon syndrome kicking in. | 1.2581 | 0.05231 | 124 | 101 | 14 | 9 |
1694 | Middle berth, your 15 minutes are up. Top berth, your time starts now. | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1695 | Thanks for using our group deals for this week's therapy session | 1.2581 | 0.05355 | 124 | 102 | 12 | 10 |
1696 | For the last time, the discount does NOT apply if you continue to talk amongst yourselves! | 1.2581 | 0.05105 | 124 | 100 | 16 | 8 |
1697 | You have to not stack up your problems. Take them one by one. | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1698 | I feel that I have low self-esteem because there is always someone above me. | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1699 | Overbooked!! | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1700 | So, tell me more about your favorite sibling. | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1701 | Level two, why do you feel that people don't give you the undivided attention you deserve? | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1702 | Before we start, can i see your coupon, please? | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 99 | 18 | 7 |
1703 | ..and the cutbacks in your mental health coverage: how do they make you feel? | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1704 | Welcome to your first session of Psych-sharing. As we discussed, each of you gets one-third of the hour. Ms. Top Bunk, you go first. | 1.2581 | 0.05105 | 124 | 100 | 16 | 8 |
1705 | Why do you always fixate on how you stack up? | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1706 | Patient number one: Why would I laugh more in our sessions than I would with patients number two and three? | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1707 | So what makes you think you have a split personality? | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1708 | I see you folks signed up to save money through the group plan... | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 95 | 24 | 4 |
1709 | Welcome to throuples therapy. To begin...is there someone else we should know about? | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1710 | This is what you get with medicare for all. | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 99 | 18 | 7 |
1711 | Let's ramp up from cynic to manic to panic. | 1.2581 | 0.05105 | 124 | 100 | 16 | 8 |
1712 | Now that rent in this building is so high, I have switched to triple bookings. | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1713 | Well, now as your analyst I'm wondering what it says that you all misunderstood the "Three for One" offer? | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 99 | 18 | 7 |
1714 | Now tell me again how the three of you met? | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1715 | There's a lot to debunk in this relationship. | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1716 | Remember your individual experiences are unique | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1717 | Under the terms of the discount, each of you will be getting the same advice. | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 99 | 18 | 7 |
1718 | I see that we're making some progress on your multiple personality disorder. You're down to three. | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1719 | I don’t think this partnership with ‘Lyft Shared’ is going to work | 1.2581 | 0.05105 | 124 | 100 | 16 | 8 |
1720 | Superego can go first followed by ego and then Id. | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1721 | How can I help you debunk that assumption? | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 96 | 22 | 5 |
1722 | Hi, the internet is bad for your mental health. Now send in the next batch. | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1723 | How long have you felt that you weren't getting enough attention? | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1724 | What did you think a 3 for 1 session mean't? | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1725 | Okay, Id and Ego, how do you feel about what Superego just said? | 1.2581 | 0.04416 | 124 | 95 | 26 | 3 |
1726 | Whoever said that is in big trouble. | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 99 | 18 | 7 |
1727 | So, how do you feel about being the middle child? | 1.2581 | 0.04416 | 124 | 98 | 22 | 4 |
1728 | I think triple billing is approximate in this case. | 1.2581 | 0.04974 | 124 | 99 | 18 | 7 |
1729 | It’s now mandated by your health insurance, sorry. | 1.2581 | 0.04562 | 124 | 96 | 24 | 4 |
1730 | When did you start fantasizing about Snap, Crackle and Pop? | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1731 | Ok - So that proves it - The middle child gets no attention | 1.2581 | 0.04704 | 124 | 97 | 22 | 5 |
1732 | So let’s go over your stories once again - from the top! | 1.2581 | 0.04841 | 124 | 98 | 20 | 6 |
1733 | 'On the count of three, switch!' | 1.2562 | 0.04914 | 121 | 96 | 19 | 6 |
1734 | So the three of you think you might have multiple personality disorder? | 1.2560 | 0.04806 | 125 | 99 | 20 | 6 |
1735 | And what makes you think you're not triplets? | 1.2560 | 0.04670 | 125 | 98 | 22 | 5 |
1736 | First, I’d like to welcome you to my IKEA office location | 1.2560 | 0.04670 | 125 | 98 | 22 | 5 |
1737 | Yes, we call that a triple-decker diagnoses It’s when you and your friends suffer from the same symptoms. | 1.2560 | 0.05068 | 125 | 101 | 16 | 8 |
1738 | So what I’m hearing is your anxiety trigger is ride sharing. | 1.2560 | 0.04530 | 125 | 97 | 24 | 4 |
1739 | Tell me more about your obsession with club sandwiches. | 1.2560 | 0.04530 | 125 | 97 | 24 | 4 |
1740 | Well frankly, I also think your approach has been debunked. | 1.2560 | 0.05068 | 125 | 101 | 16 | 8 |
1741 | You weren't kidding about your multiple personalities... | 1.2542 | 0.04990 | 118 | 94 | 18 | 6 |
1742 | Could you remind me which one of you said to call this couples counseling? | 1.2542 | 0.04533 | 118 | 91 | 24 | 3 |
1743 | To whom it may concern | 1.2541 | 0.04286 | 122 | 97 | 21 | 4 |
1744 | Welcome to our first session of Group Therapy for Multiple Personalities | 1.2541 | 0.04737 | 122 | 96 | 20 | 5 |
1745 | You're the one's that wanted to let the horse live in your bedroom! | 1.2541 | 0.04442 | 122 | 94 | 25 | 3 |
1746 | Therapist: Chad, Karen from HR and James from accounting have expressed resentment with how casually you and your colleagues in the IT department are allowed to dress. | 1.2521 | 0.05232 | 119 | 97 | 14 | 8 |
1747 | What do you think has come between you? | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1748 | Yes, I specialize in multiple personality disorders. Why do you ask? | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1749 | Don’t worry—you’ll all get a chance at being the superego. | 1.2521 | 0.05094 | 119 | 96 | 16 | 7 |
1750 | Sometimes I think this group therapy is complete bunk. | 1.2521 | 0.04172 | 119 | 90 | 28 | 1 |
1751 | How did that make you- plural- feel | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1752 | Before we begin, I must ask: Which one of you is the middle child? | 1.2521 | 0.04952 | 119 | 95 | 18 | 6 |
1753 | I think we should take a multi-layered approach here! | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1754 | Tell me about the relationship dynamics here." | 1.2521 | 0.04339 | 119 | 91 | 26 | 2 |
1755 | Welcome to our first Tripolar group! | 1.2521 | 0.05094 | 119 | 96 | 16 | 7 |
1756 | Welcome to Costco Counseling. | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1757 | This may take some time to debunk. | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1758 | Did this traumatic childhood experience occur at summer camp, by any chance? | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1759 | Your problems stem from the trauma you experienced at summer camp. | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1760 | Of course you're getting the family discount rate. | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1761 | Let's have Superego respond directly to Id this time. | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1762 | They said that's not how group therapy works, but what do they know? | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1763 | Multitasking is my issue, what’s yours? | 1.2521 | 0.04172 | 119 | 90 | 28 | 1 |
1764 | You have multiple personality disorder. | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 94 | 21 | 4 |
1765 | So welcome to the first session of 'CPAP Exposure Therapy' in which you will learn how to tolerate being seen by someone while wearing your 'appliance.' | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1766 | And although it goes against my own interests, may I say that when you start to think of yourself as a single person, my fee will reflect the breakthrough? | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 92 | 22 | 4 |
1767 | So you all met on the therapist-share app, ShrinkedIn? | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1768 | Welcome to group therapy in my studio office. | 1.2521 | 0.04952 | 119 | 94 | 17 | 6 |
1769 | I'm sorry, but there is no discount for quarantine therapy. | 1.2521 | 0.04952 | 119 | 95 | 18 | 6 |
1770 | Everyone’s pain is unique, yes. But bad things happen in threes. | 1.2521 | 0.04952 | 119 | 95 | 18 | 6 |
1771 | I can put this on three separate checks but there's a 20% service charge. | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1772 | This way, you’ll all be out in 20 minutes.” | 1.2521 | 0.04952 | 119 | 95 | 18 | 6 |
1773 | So, how do you feel about speed therapy? | 1.2521 | 0.04952 | 119 | 95 | 18 | 6 |
1774 | It's a textbook middle child affliction, which I'm guessing only applies to one of you. | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1775 | So you've all entered some caption contest 698 times and never made a single top 3? | 1.2521 | 0.05094 | 119 | 96 | 16 | 7 |
1776 | Now which of your three personalities wants to start today? | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1777 | Threeapy | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1778 | As per privacy rules, remember not to reveal anthing personal. | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1779 | Let's debunk the causes of all these stacked-up anxieties. | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1780 | When you agreed to this love triangle, you didn’t see this coming? | 1.2521 | 0.04172 | 119 | 90 | 28 | 1 |
1781 | I see you’ve booked a session through the couch-sharing app. | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 92 | 22 | 4 |
1782 | So...it all started when she asked for a threesome? | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1783 | So how do YOU feel you stack up to one another? | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1784 | To have your own session,you'll need to upgrade from Economy Therapy to Business Class Therapy. | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1785 | What makes you think I'm not prioritizing your needs? | 1.2521 | 0.05232 | 119 | 97 | 14 | 8 |
1786 | "I'd like to go a bit deeper into your experiences at summer camp." | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1787 | It’s a new concept called psycho bunk bed therapy. | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1788 | I’m giving you the Friends and Family Rate! | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1789 | Okay, first thing, the Bargain Plan does Not mean you all talk at once. | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1790 | We will now test the hypothesis that good things come in threes. | 1.2521 | 0.04339 | 119 | 91 | 26 | 2 |
1791 | Apart from dividing my fee three ways, it's highly unusual to include the boyfriend in your marriage counseling. | 1.2521 | 0.04952 | 119 | 95 | 18 | 6 |
1792 | We're taking group therapy to a new level. | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1793 | Just keep thinking: 'good things come in threes'. | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1794 | Don't worry, it's totally normal to come to therapy in tiers. | 1.2521 | 0.05094 | 119 | 96 | 16 | 7 |
1795 | I am an excellent multi-tasker. | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1796 | Don't worry, unlike Bob and Phil, you're in a safe spot here. | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1797 | It's not confidential, but I do make sure none of you know each other in real life." | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1798 | Please tell me more about your perceived multiple personality disorder, Sybil! | 1.2521 | 0.05094 | 119 | 96 | 16 | 7 |
1799 | So, Janice, tell me about this need you have to rise above others. | 1.2521 | 0.04806 | 119 | 94 | 20 | 5 |
1800 | Statistically speaking, one of you is depressed. | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 92 | 24 | 3 |
1801 | Number two, tell me more about these feelings of anonymity... | 1.2521 | 0.04952 | 119 | 95 | 18 | 6 |
1802 | I know this therapy is bunk. But it's cheaper. | 1.2521 | 0.04339 | 119 | 91 | 26 | 2 |
1803 | So, not only will you leave here with no resolution to your challenges, but you'll also have the burden of the other two's miseries | 1.2521 | 0.05094 | 119 | 96 | 16 | 7 |
1804 | My multiple personality patients feel more comfortable this way. | 1.2521 | 0.04500 | 119 | 94 | 21 | 4 |
1805 | This is the Groupon special. | 1.2521 | 0.05094 | 119 | 96 | 16 | 7 |
1806 | So, psychotherapy works on many levels... | 1.2521 | 0.04656 | 119 | 93 | 22 | 4 |
1807 | Now, raise your hand if you know why we’re all here today. | 1.2521 | 0.05094 | 119 | 96 | 16 | 7 |
1808 | How’s your collective unconscious? | 1.2521 | 0.03997 | 119 | 91 | 27 | 1 |
1809 | Now, Jenny, try explaining to Mark why you left him for Carl. Like we practiced. | 1.2521 | 0.04952 | 119 | 95 | 18 | 6 |
1810 | I began my career working on an assembly line. Why do you ask? | 1.2520 | 0.04410 | 123 | 95 | 25 | 3 |
1811 | sir in the middle you gotta lay off the kfc | 1.2520 | 0.04703 | 123 | 97 | 21 | 5 |
1812 | This is certainly not my idea of what group therapy is supposed to be. | 1.2520 | 0.04703 | 123 | 97 | 21 | 5 |
1813 | OK, superego, how do you feel about that? | 1.2520 | 0.04559 | 123 | 96 | 23 | 4 |
1814 | Now I want you to imagine a fourth bed. | 1.2500 | 0.04467 | 120 | 93 | 24 | 3 |
1815 | OK, Econo-Tuesday. Five minute blames and two minute rebuttals." | 1.2500 | 0.04308 | 120 | 92 | 26 | 2 |
1816 | I think now we can make real progress treating your multiple personality disorder. | 1.2500 | 0.03969 | 120 | 90 | 30 | 0 |
1817 | There’s a chance you’re suffering from multiple personality syndrome. | 1.2500 | 0.04467 | 120 | 93 | 24 | 3 |
1818 | Let's see if you can recall your childhoods now. | 1.2500 | 0.05592 | 104 | 85 | 12 | 7 |
1819 | You should have opted for the PPO instead of the HMO. | 1.2500 | 0.04915 | 120 | 96 | 18 | 6 |
1820 | So today, we’re replicating your childhood traumas of summer camp. In 29 minutes you will jump into a freezing cold lake. | 1.2500 | 0.04308 | 120 | 92 | 26 | 2 |
1821 | Maybe crowdfunding the session wasn’t such a good idea. | 1.2500 | 0.04915 | 120 | 96 | 18 | 6 |
1822 | Groupon psychotherapy session. | 1.2500 | 0.04308 | 120 | 92 | 26 | 2 |
1823 | I just feel that I can’t get a moment to myself anymore. | 1.2500 | 0.05423 | 104 | 84 | 14 | 6 |
1824 | You’’ll each still be responsible for your own co-pay | 1.2500 | 0.04771 | 120 | 95 | 20 | 5 |
1825 | That's the last time I'll run that three for the price of one ad | 1.2500 | 0.05541 | 96 | 77 | 14 | 5 |
1826 | Well, you did use a Groupon. | 1.2479 | 0.04361 | 117 | 90 | 25 | 2 |
1827 | I'm sorry - but the diversity discount requires either two females or two of color. | 1.2479 | 0.04687 | 117 | 92 | 21 | 4 |
1828 | Well, the CEO of your insurance company is concerned his income is too low. | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 93 | 19 | 5 |
1829 | Your addiction concern is "Groupon" | 1.2479 | 0.04687 | 117 | 92 | 21 | 4 |
1830 | And Charles, please explain why today's world makes you feel like you're just another sardine in a can. | 1.2479 | 0.04527 | 117 | 91 | 23 | 3 |
1831 | Nice work on why they left you and why it wasn't your fault, now let's wrap up with horoscopes. | 1.2479 | 0.04991 | 117 | 94 | 17 | 6 |
1832 | Remind me who has the issue with bedwetting. | 1.2479 | 0.04527 | 117 | 91 | 23 | 3 |
1833 | Yes,Todd. Technically you are the inner child. | 1.2479 | 0.04527 | 117 | 91 | 23 | 3 |
1834 | Consider this Step One in overcoming your fears of the Three Stooges. | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 93 | 19 | 5 |
1835 | First step is to admit there is a control issue within the family | 1.2479 | 0.04527 | 117 | 91 | 23 | 3 |
1836 | This week I thought we’d try a new approach to group. I came across it on the Ikea website. | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 93 | 19 | 5 |
1837 | Regardless of sexual orientation, this is not what is meant by ménage à trois. | 1.2479 | 0.04361 | 117 | 90 | 25 | 2 |
1838 | Your company’s health insurance plan is somewhat restrictive. | 1.2479 | 0.04189 | 117 | 89 | 27 | 1 |
1839 | That's normal... feelings of inferiority often arise in our stratified society. | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 93 | 19 | 5 |
1840 | This problem of yours is really layered. | 1.2479 | 0.04361 | 117 | 90 | 25 | 2 |
1841 | And how does this lack of privacy make you feel? | 1.2479 | 0.04361 | 117 | 90 | 25 | 2 |
1842 | Can you see the glass ceiling, Sophie? | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 93 | 19 | 5 |
1843 | Multiple personality disorder typically only applies to one person | 1.2479 | 0.04527 | 117 | 91 | 23 | 3 |
1844 | OK, so what I'm hearing is that you all now regret supporting Medicare for all. | 1.2479 | 0.04991 | 117 | 94 | 17 | 6 |
1845 | Tell me what it was like not to have your own room growing up. | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 92 | 19 | 5 |
1846 | Ok, First Sarah, lets address your bedwetting. | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 93 | 19 | 5 |
1847 | So you feel three's a crowd? | 1.2479 | 0.04527 | 117 | 91 | 23 | 3 |
1848 | I'd like to thank everyone for joining our therapy pool session, we'll be charging 25% less. | 1.2479 | 0.04361 | 117 | 90 | 25 | 2 |
1849 | Tell me, Do you think there's a hierarchy in your relationship ? | 1.2479 | 0.04841 | 117 | 95 | 16 | 6 |
1850 | Henry- I know you might be a bit embarrassed that Jane asked for a psychotherapy ménage à trois session. But you are in the middle, and Jane and Timmy are now offering you a fairer rotation schedule- here and at home”. | 1.2458 | 0.04805 | 118 | 94 | 19 | 5 |
1851 | Let's explore that some more. Why do you think that group therapy is a lot of bunk? | 1.2458 | 0.05097 | 118 | 96 | 15 | 7 |
1852 | Now, which one of you said 'no one thinks I'm special'? | 1.2458 | 0.04652 | 118 | 93 | 21 | 4 |
1853 | Now, I know why you're here, but first let's agree on something: Not all roommates get therapy like this." | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1854 | Take a breath and start at the top. | 1.2456 | 0.04416 | 114 | 88 | 24 | 2 |
1855 | Fear-of-heights exposure therapy must be tailored to the individual. | 1.2456 | 0.05071 | 114 | 92 | 16 | 6 |
1856 | How long have you been sleeping in separate beds? | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1857 | We will just start from the bottom up | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1858 | And you all agreed to Medicare for all? | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1859 | Welcome to thruples counseling. | 1.2456 | 0.05222 | 114 | 93 | 14 | 7 |
1860 | Welcome to the I am an individual , group session. | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1861 | So what I'm hearing is you all have been dealing with separation anxiety since the human centipede. | 1.2456 | 0.05511 | 114 | 95 | 10 | 9 |
1862 | If I understand correctly, your spouses feel that you are overly shelf-ish. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1863 | No, Mr. Carlton - Id and superego are abstract concepts, not your close friends | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1864 | Tell me again why you think the throuple isn’t working for you... | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1865 | Our privacy policy insurance will guard the secrecy of your confessions. Remaining issues will be covered by no-disclosure agreements. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1866 | Now which one of you is the id? | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1867 | How are you feeling about President Sanders' new healthcare plan? | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1868 | Welcome to my "Save a Buck" psychoanalysis plan. | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1869 | If you enjoyed this ShrinkPOOL, please rate me five stars | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1870 | Your copay has been discounted | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1871 | Trust me, this is very effective for middle child syndrome. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1872 | I'm not Bernie Sanders but he approved this plan. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1873 | Welcome to throuples therapy, where three is proud, not a crowd! | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1874 | Welcome to your first therapy session, Groupon customers! | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1875 | Has anyone ever talked to you about multiple personality disorder? | 1.2456 | 0.05071 | 114 | 92 | 16 | 6 |
1876 | And when did these feelings of indignity begin for you #3? | 1.2456 | 0.04416 | 114 | 88 | 24 | 2 |
1877 | We've found our patients appreciate the privacy of separate beds. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1878 | The coupon clearly stated ‘three sessions for the price of one’. | 1.2456 | 0.04416 | 114 | 88 | 24 | 2 |
1879 | So tell me, Brenda, what brings your multiple personalities in today? | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1880 | Its part of our new diversity initiative. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1881 | No frank, I believe that theory was debunked. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1882 | Whatever you do, don’t move. | 1.2456 | 0.04237 | 114 | 87 | 26 | 1 |
1883 | It does appear that the odds are stacked against you. . | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1884 | Well, Jerome, it sounds like a case of middle child syndrome. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1885 | When did you first start watching This is Us? | 1.2456 | 0.03853 | 114 | 89 | 21 | 2 |
1886 | Hmm, entitlement, lack of commitment and narcissism, a veritable millennial club sandwich. | 1.2456 | 0.05071 | 114 | 92 | 16 | 6 |
1887 | How long have you suspected you had multiple personalities? | 1.2456 | 0.04416 | 114 | 88 | 24 | 2 |
1888 | However, if you do not speak in chorus, I will have to charge you individually. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1889 | ...you are special and unique | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1890 | Just so we're clear. It's still $75 an hour per person. | 1.2456 | 0.05071 | 114 | 92 | 16 | 6 |
1891 | I will bill your insurance companies separately but address you collectively as "the patient." | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1892 | Honestly, I never had to do this before during an election cycle. | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1893 | A ladder for your thoughts? | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1894 | Well, we like to call it Medicare For All - Beta version.” | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1895 | Look, you're paying for 'economy couch,' so let's just get used to it. | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1896 | Who wants to begin today? The id | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 90 | 18 | 5 |
1897 | Now,which of you is here for bedwetting? | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1898 | I didn't know I had to do all this being the camp counselor. | 1.2456 | 0.05222 | 114 | 93 | 14 | 7 |
1899 | Seven more, we’ll have a minyan... | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1900 | Welcome to Wheel of Misfortune, the game where players compete for the most painful memories of childhood. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1901 | Just see yourself in the other. Also, I need to triple my income. | 1.2456 | 0.05071 | 114 | 92 | 16 | 6 |
1902 | This isn't what I expected when I saw your sign 'discount psychotherapy' | 1.2456 | 0.04416 | 114 | 88 | 24 | 2 |
1903 | I am usually booked 3 months ahead and you millennials are into over-sharing anyway.... | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1904 | I’ll remind you again, with group rate therapy please don’t share personal information due to confidentiality rules | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1905 | How is this like Uber pool? | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1906 | Now which of you has a fear of heights? | 1.2456 | 0.04049 | 114 | 86 | 28 | 0 |
1907 | Just what makes you feel like family therapy is "bunk?" | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1908 | Being the middle child can be tough. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1909 | Let's begin with a group sigh. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1910 | So it all began on an overnight train ride? | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1911 | Let's move it along; my day is stacked. | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1912 | Agnes, why do you think you have been having nightmares about traveling in steerage? | 1.2456 | 0.04237 | 114 | 92 | 19 | 3 |
1913 | Yes, this is where open relationships lead. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1914 | This isn't exactly what I meant when I said "family discount". | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1915 | On your new low cost health plan this IS individual therapy. | 1.2456 | 0.04416 | 114 | 88 | 24 | 2 |
1916 | Well, there's a copay for a ladder. | 1.2456 | 0.05071 | 114 | 92 | 16 | 6 |
1917 | So let's try debunking some of our fears. | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 90 | 19 | 4 |
1918 | I graded your personality tests. Two of you showed room for improvement. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1919 | If your other two multiple personalities want to come out now, I'll need higher ceilings. | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1920 | I’ve really got to stop advertising on Groupon. | 1.2456 | 0.04416 | 114 | 88 | 24 | 2 |
1921 | Welcome to my group session, No More Tiers. . . | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1922 | You are suffering from the tertiary stage of the illness | 1.2456 | 0.04237 | 114 | 87 | 26 | 1 |
1923 | So, tell me, Marjorie, how has being on top changed your mood? | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1924 | Sorry Bill– seat change requests cannot be accommodated at the fare price you purchased. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1925 | If one of you doesn’t speak up, it’ll be an awful waste of a Groupon. | 1.2456 | 0.04237 | 114 | 89 | 19 | 3 |
1926 | So, when did you first start feeling your personal issues were insignificant? | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1927 | Time to de-bunk that stack of memories! | 1.2456 | 0.04416 | 114 | 88 | 24 | 2 |
1928 | Tell me again about the company's great health plan. | 1.2456 | 0.04416 | 114 | 88 | 24 | 2 |
1929 | I said I do COUPLES therapy. | 1.2456 | 0.04589 | 114 | 89 | 22 | 3 |
1930 | Yes, Bill, you can be on the top next week | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1931 | Well yes, it does say 'multiple personalities,' but it doesn't say multiple people... | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1932 | I can see why your ménage à trois may have failed. | 1.2456 | 0.04755 | 114 | 90 | 20 | 4 |
1933 | " No, you don't get charged a single rate by claiming you all share one personality." | 1.2456 | 0.04915 | 114 | 91 | 18 | 5 |
1934 | Your separation anxieties can be interpreted on multiple levels. | 1.2456 | 0.04416 | 114 | 88 | 24 | 2 |
1935 | That’s just bunk! | 1.2447 | 0.05171 | 94 | 74 | 17 | 3 |
1936 | This way I can quickly find your underlying problems, at least for two of you. | 1.2435 | 0.04877 | 115 | 92 | 18 | 5 |
1937 | Paul, why do you feel that there are people keeping you from moving upward in life? | 1.2435 | 0.04553 | 115 | 90 | 22 | 3 |
1938 | Here at 'Cut-Rate Freud,' we analyze only a third of your psyche. | 1.2435 | 0.04553 | 115 | 90 | 22 | 3 |
1939 | Maybe it's time to debunk modern psychiatry | 1.2435 | 0.04205 | 115 | 88 | 26 | 1 |
1940 | Let’s get started. Top down OK with everyone? | 1.2435 | 0.04205 | 115 | 88 | 26 | 1 |
1941 | Should I send the bill to Id, Ego, or Superego? | 1.2435 | 0.04877 | 115 | 92 | 18 | 5 |
1942 | Interesting thoughts about pregnancy, Karen. So now it's your turn, Michael. What's this Zelig syndrome you mentioned? | 1.2435 | 0.04205 | 115 | 88 | 26 | 1 |
1943 | It's called the trickledown theory. | 1.2435 | 0.04205 | 115 | 88 | 26 | 1 |
1944 | You’re the grumpiest triplets I’ve ever encountered, and my triplets-only practice is huge. | 1.2435 | 0.04718 | 115 | 91 | 20 | 4 |
1945 | I’m the first to accept Groupon insurance. | 1.2435 | 0.04205 | 115 | 88 | 26 | 1 |
1946 | OK, let's start by saying this could be over by November. | 1.2435 | 0.04877 | 115 | 92 | 18 | 5 |
1947 | Same insurance, same anxiety disorder, let's begin! | 1.2435 | 0.05031 | 115 | 93 | 16 | 6 |
1948 | Funny you should ask. I was wondering how to fit more patients in to my schedule when The Lego Movie gave me the greatest idea! | 1.2435 | 0.04553 | 115 | 90 | 22 | 3 |
1949 | There's nothing Oedipal in sharing condiments. | 1.2435 | 0.04205 | 115 | 90 | 21 | 2 |
1950 | So exactly which one of you is the middle child? | 1.2435 | 0.04718 | 115 | 91 | 20 | 4 |
1951 | Trust me. This is the best way to deal with the id, ego, and superego | 1.2435 | 0.04553 | 115 | 90 | 22 | 3 |
1952 | If I understand correctly, you identify with Huey, you with Dewey and you with Louie. | 1.2432 | 0.04826 | 111 | 88 | 19 | 4 |
1953 | Okay, one at a time, who was the one that wanted to be experimental? | 1.2424 | 0.05390 | 99 | 80 | 14 | 5 |
1954 | A split personality in what way? | 1.2414 | 0.04992 | 116 | 94 | 16 | 6 |
1955 | Two free with one isn’t much of a bargain if none of you talk. | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1956 | Buy one get two free: which one has insurance? | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1957 | You all have the same problem, so you all get the same treatment. | 1.2414 | 0.04839 | 116 | 93 | 18 | 5 |
1958 | This is known as the cutting edge IRL Trio Treatment for Social Media Addiction. | 1.2414 | 0.05284 | 116 | 96 | 12 | 8 |
1959 | I'm not sure this is what they meant by Medicare for all. | 1.2414 | 0.05140 | 116 | 95 | 14 | 7 |
1960 | Let’s share the emotional burden along with the out-of-network co-pay. | 1.2414 | 0.04839 | 116 | 93 | 18 | 5 |
1961 | Starting with you, Mr. Miller, why do you feel that first access to the copier is so important? | 1.2414 | 0.04839 | 116 | 93 | 18 | 5 |
1962 | So you mean to tell me that you all feel like you're trapped in a parallel universe? | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1963 | My rate is $240 an hour. Your insurance reimburses up to $80. No out-of-pocket for you. You're welcome. | 1.2414 | 0.04519 | 116 | 91 | 22 | 3 |
1964 | I don’t think parallel thinking works in therapy | 1.2414 | 0.04350 | 116 | 89 | 23 | 2 |
1965 | I'm still charging individually | 1.2414 | 0.04839 | 116 | 93 | 18 | 5 |
1966 | Let's start with your childhood. From the top. | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1967 | No Brad, your mother did not tell me to put you in the middle bunk. | 1.2414 | 0.04350 | 116 | 90 | 24 | 2 |
1968 | Rock, paper, Scissors to see who goes first? | 1.2414 | 0.04839 | 116 | 93 | 18 | 5 |
1969 | Just say present if your phobia is mention. | 1.2414 | 0.05140 | 116 | 95 | 14 | 7 |
1970 | Family therapy is not Groupon for individual therapy. | 1.2414 | 0.05140 | 116 | 95 | 14 | 7 |
1971 | When was it you began to feel that people were following you? | 1.2414 | 0.04350 | 116 | 90 | 24 | 2 |
1972 | Bernice: superiority complex. Adam: middle child syndrome. Mike: you're just a downer. | 1.2414 | 0.04839 | 116 | 93 | 18 | 5 |
1973 | Unbeknownst to our patients, we therapists have been having a little caption contest of our own. I congratulate you for making the cut for the final three. | 1.2414 | 0.05140 | 116 | 95 | 14 | 7 |
1974 | This may be a bit easier to clear up than the garden variety multiple personality disorder. | 1.2414 | 0.04839 | 116 | 93 | 18 | 5 |
1975 | You'll all be happy to know that I'm way ahead of my colleagues in both innovation and productivity. | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1976 | ‘I usually follow a top to bottom approach’ | 1.2414 | 0.04519 | 116 | 91 | 22 | 3 |
1977 | Sorry, everyone, but thanks to your insurance company, it was either the stacked couches or group therapy at Madison Square Garden. | 1.2414 | 0.04839 | 116 | 93 | 18 | 5 |
1978 | There's no premium seating, it's the same standard hourly rate for each of you. | 1.2414 | 0.04350 | 116 | 90 | 24 | 2 |
1979 | Top to bottom: Superego,Ego,Id | 1.2414 | 0.04839 | 116 | 93 | 18 | 5 |
1980 | This is the HMO plan. | 1.2414 | 0.04519 | 116 | 91 | 22 | 3 |
1981 | It appears you have split personality disorder. | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1982 | The accountants said I had to bump it up to a 150 minute hour. | 1.2414 | 0.04519 | 116 | 91 | 22 | 3 |
1983 | So your dreams about a sandwich...Do they make you feel like you're not part of the club? | 1.2414 | 0.04992 | 116 | 94 | 16 | 6 |
1984 | Now that I’ve psychoanalyzed all of you, I choose bachelor number two. | 1.2414 | 0.05140 | 116 | 95 | 14 | 7 |
1985 | Thank you for accepting my therapy Groupon offer. Let’s begin with your feelings about summer camp... | 1.2414 | 0.04350 | 116 | 90 | 24 | 2 |
1986 | Let's see: two's a company; three is a crowd. Which of you is in bad company? | 1.2414 | 0.04992 | 116 | 94 | 16 | 6 |
1987 | Patient number one for $500... | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1988 | Eeny mini miny mo. State your issues and away we'll go. | 1.2414 | 0.04174 | 116 | 89 | 26 | 1 |
1989 | How does the group feel about, eye contact, next week? | 1.2414 | 0.04992 | 116 | 94 | 16 | 6 |
1990 | Welcome to business class group therapy. | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1991 | Eating disorders are a common problem of the middle child. | 1.2414 | 0.04682 | 116 | 92 | 20 | 4 |
1992 | I won't lie to you: Triple-decker therapy couches are flimsy. | 1.2414 | 0.04350 | 116 | 92 | 21 | 3 |
1993 | Our hours are almost up. | 1.2411 | 0.04438 | 112 | 87 | 23 | 2 |
1994 | Do we want one analysis or separate today? | 1.2411 | 0.04616 | 112 | 88 | 21 | 3 |
1995 | Top to bottom: eccentric, neurotic, psychotic. Or is that bottom to top? Or are they, from top, lethargic, lazy and slothful? What a conundrum. | 1.2411 | 0.05267 | 112 | 92 | 13 | 7 |
1996 | Starting from the bottom, how do feel about your insurance not covering private sessions? | 1.2411 | 0.04787 | 112 | 89 | 19 | 4 |
1997 | Remember, in order to get the three for one discount you all have to have the same neurosis. | 1.2411 | 0.04787 | 112 | 89 | 19 | 4 |
1998 | No. I said there would be ‘tiers’ in your therapy sessions. | 1.2411 | 0.04952 | 112 | 90 | 17 | 5 |
1999 | Medicare for all, Psychiatric Division. | 1.2411 | 0.05267 | 112 | 92 | 13 | 7 |
2000 | You all have the same issue but for reasons of privacy I won't use your real names... | 1.2411 | 0.04787 | 112 | 89 | 19 | 4 |
2001 | So what makes you feel as if you are not special? | 1.2393 | 0.04485 | 117 | 92 | 22 | 3 |
2002 | I'm sorry but your 16.6667 minutes are up... | 1.2389 | 0.05071 | 113 | 92 | 15 | 6 |
2003 | While you're in here, you can speak threely about your feelings. | 1.2376 | 0.05477 | 101 | 83 | 12 | 6 |
2004 | I want you to face it; your psychosis is a lot of bunk. | 1.2368 | 0.04712 | 114 | 91 | 19 | 4 |
2005 | Tell me more about being stuck between a loveless marriage and an ungrateful child. | 1.2368 | 0.04545 | 114 | 90 | 21 | 3 |
2006 | Each one of you is the third child | 1.2368 | 0.05031 | 114 | 93 | 15 | 6 |
2007 | I'm not sure that a Groupon was the way to go this time. | 1.2368 | 0.03999 | 114 | 89 | 23 | 1 |
2008 | Who’s the middle child now? | 1.2368 | 0.04189 | 114 | 88 | 25 | 1 |
2009 | It’s not what you wanted to hear, but the diagnosis is clear: you have multiple personality disorder. | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2010 | Steve, I can see you playing with your balls | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2011 | Due to HIPPA privacy rules, this will be a silent group session. | 1.2364 | 0.05314 | 110 | 91 | 12 | 7 |
2012 | We'll see a breakthrough if you all remember what the shape of a love triangle is | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2013 | We're taking group therapy to a higher level. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2014 | Well, how else would I vertically integrate?! | 1.2364 | 0.04269 | 110 | 90 | 17 | 3 |
2015 | Actually, my specialty is multiple personalities. | 1.2364 | 0.04269 | 110 | 85 | 24 | 1 |
2016 | When you said you were suffering from multiple personalities, I took that in more of a clinical sense. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2017 | Well, this way you all qualify for a discounted rate. | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 87 | 18 | 4 |
2018 | No, you don't get a single diagnosis discount just because you all hated your mother. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2019 | So Jean, I hear you saying you feel subordinated by the social hierarchy | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2020 | Next! | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 88 | 19 | 3 |
2021 | The Groupon rate doesn't include doctor-patient confidentiality. | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2022 | A new patient has been added to this therapyshare. You're all headed to approximately the same emotional breakthrough. | 1.2364 | 0.05619 | 110 | 93 | 8 | 9 |
2023 | This group therapy arrangement will have to do until I figure out to avoid overbooking. | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2024 | At this point, I think it's best that we triple your prescription. | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
2025 | They didn’t teach this in graduate school! | 1.2364 | 0.04269 | 110 | 85 | 24 | 1 |
2026 | Stevies, I think I see a screenplay in this. | 1.2364 | 0.05468 | 110 | 92 | 10 | 8 |
2027 | This really isn't what co-pay means. | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 85 | 22 | 2 |
2028 | So I'm assuming an LGBTQ menage a trois power struggle here" someone PLEASE start" | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
2029 | Welcome to, 'Transition: From Submarine Life to Civilian Life." | 1.2364 | 0.04269 | 110 | 85 | 24 | 1 |
2030 | Let's begin with the triage...which one of you is most upset with my last bill? | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 87 | 18 | 4 |
2031 | Now I know why she charges a third of other psychiatrists. | 1.2364 | 0.04990 | 110 | 89 | 16 | 5 |
2032 | Complex answers aside, what associations do you have to the word 'Oedipus'? | 1.2364 | 0.05619 | 110 | 93 | 8 | 9 |
2033 | You realize, of course, you are ADOPTED triplets | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2034 | It's the new way to do group. No confrontations. | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
2035 | Ok. Three part harmony. “Lo-o-ove is coming, lo-o-ve is coming to us all.” | 1.2364 | 0.05314 | 110 | 91 | 12 | 7 |
2036 | I would encourage you to stop watching 'This Is Us" | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2037 | For once, the black guy's not on the bottom! | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2038 | If any more personalities emerge, I will have to raise your fee! | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2039 | Sorry, it’s the only way we can keep up this election year. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2040 | To which of your personalities should we send the bill? | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2041 | Jamais deux sans trois! | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2042 | Before we begin, I'll need to see that buy one, get two free coupon. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2043 | Our Entertainment book defines "session" as "a single appointment for therapeutic purposes with one or more participants"...so I can only accept one coupon. | 1.2364 | 0.05468 | 110 | 92 | 10 | 8 |
2044 | Personally, I’m a hoarder. | 1.2364 | 0.05619 | 110 | 93 | 8 | 9 |
2045 | Seems your Split Personality is real. | 1.2364 | 0.05154 | 110 | 90 | 14 | 6 |
2046 | Worst coupon ever. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2047 | Imagine if you will each of you is a layer in a clubhouse sandwich | 1.2364 | 0.04990 | 110 | 89 | 16 | 5 |
2048 | Susan, superiority complex. Ted, you’re too compromising. Bob, low self esteem. Our time’s up. See you next week. | 1.2364 | 0.04990 | 110 | 89 | 16 | 5 |
2049 | Well, Steyer, Klobuchar and Buttigieg won't win the nomination anyway, so it will be easier to be friends again after they drop out. | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2050 | Well, to begin--because I think we should address the elephant in the room--the correct title would be This Is We. | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
2051 | Let's begin our session with a few stanzas from Kumbaya. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2052 | Same question to daybed number 2. | 1.2364 | 0.05314 | 110 | 91 | 12 | 7 |
2053 | Okay, now Jim on the bottom, what are your top two concerns? | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2054 | Tell me about your mother/partner/new medication. | 1.2364 | 0.04269 | 110 | 85 | 24 | 1 |
2055 | We’re here to debunk myths about group therapy | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2056 | Of course, it’s called “Group Therapy” | 1.2364 | 0.04990 | 110 | 89 | 16 | 5 |
2057 | No discount for triplets. | 1.2364 | 0.04990 | 110 | 89 | 16 | 5 |
2058 | For you, Ethel, I AM a Freudian. Curtis, you can think of me as a Jungian. As for you, Bobby, didn't mother tell you to go nap in your own room? | 1.2364 | 0.04990 | 110 | 89 | 16 | 5 |
2059 | I didn't know the discount rate meant we all get the same diagnosis! | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
2060 | How do you feel about your GroupOn purchase? | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2061 | I always have clients in reserve in case someone cancels. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2062 | Well, what did you think "copay" meant? | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
2063 | It suddenly occurred to her that group therapy combined with a tanning salon would maximize profitability. | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2064 | Before we proceed, let me take roll call. | 1.2364 | 0.04269 | 110 | 85 | 24 | 1 |
2065 | Oh, it looks like my next appointment's coming up. Everyone, move up a spot. | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
2066 | "So, you each really thought that Medicare For All would work without some unique modifications to your current health plan?" | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2067 | Of course, some analysts have debunked Freud's theory of the Id, Ego and Super-Ego...but in your case I think it might be useful. | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2068 | Given that your love triangle is out-of-network, this is a win-win for all parties. | 1.2364 | 0.04990 | 110 | 89 | 16 | 5 |
2069 | Your insurance wouldn't pay for a ladder. | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
2070 | Welcome to managed care! | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2071 | Anyone never had group therapy before? | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2072 | Welcome to your first time share therapy. | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
2073 | Why don't you feel special? | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2074 | Tell me more about why you don’t feel unique, Jerome. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2075 | Does 60% off your hourly rate make you feel happy? | 1.2364 | 0.04460 | 110 | 86 | 22 | 2 |
2076 | Just to reiterate,no one has been involved in a menage a trois before? | 1.2364 | 0.04990 | 110 | 89 | 16 | 5 |
2077 | Perhaps the problem is that you’re talking over each other. | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2078 | Regardless of how it may feel, it's important to remember that you're not alone. | 1.2364 | 0.04269 | 110 | 85 | 24 | 1 |
2079 | Let's start with the highest co-pay. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2080 | Bob, Carol and Ted we can't start until Alice gets here | 1.2364 | 0.04069 | 110 | 84 | 26 | 0 |
2081 | So let me get this right, you all think you are the same person? | 1.2364 | 0.04820 | 110 | 88 | 18 | 4 |
2082 | Marsha's plan to multitask didn't quite pan out as well as she planned. | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2083 | Now let's talk further about your fear of parking garages. | 1.2364 | 0.05154 | 110 | 90 | 14 | 6 |
2084 | So, you suspect your relationship is not entirely monogamous? | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2085 | Time sharing is the latest thing in therapy! | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2086 | No, I'm not going to get you a glass of milk. Please try to stay focused. | 1.2364 | 0.04990 | 110 | 89 | 16 | 5 |
2087 | I try not to judge, but I'm detecting a load of bunk. | 1.2364 | 0.05154 | 110 | 90 | 14 | 6 |
2088 | It's a new concept. it's called trickle down pyschotherapy | 1.2364 | 0.04644 | 110 | 87 | 20 | 3 |
2089 | Welcome to 'fear of bunk bed immersion therapy' | 1.2342 | 0.04949 | 111 | 90 | 16 | 5 |
2090 | And now for the tertiary analysis you've been waiting for ... | 1.2342 | 0.04607 | 111 | 88 | 20 | 3 |
2091 | Family rate | 1.2342 | 0.04607 | 111 | 88 | 20 | 3 |
2092 | The advantage of having multiple personalities is the group discount. | 1.2342 | 0.04949 | 111 | 90 | 16 | 5 |
2093 | My current approach to throuple therapy is three-tiered. | 1.2330 | 0.04820 | 103 | 82 | 18 | 3 |
2094 | I will be listening to all three of you but, I will be paying special attention to you | 1.2330 | 0.05014 | 103 | 83 | 16 | 4 |
2095 | So tell me, are you actually a middle child? | 1.2330 | 0.04514 | 103 | 83 | 17 | 3 |
2096 | So, did d'Artagnan refer you? | 1.2321 | 0.04909 | 112 | 95 | 10 | 7 |
2097 | Why does everyone think the daughter is the favorite? Let's start at the top. | 1.2321 | 0.04909 | 112 | 91 | 16 | 5 |
2098 | Let's begin with my mother. | 1.2315 | 0.04482 | 108 | 85 | 21 | 2 |
2099 | Next up, the swimsuit round. | 1.2315 | 0.05028 | 108 | 88 | 15 | 5 |
2100 | Bachelor number two... how would you describe your relationship with your mother? | 1.2301 | 0.04534 | 113 | 90 | 20 | 3 |
2101 | My fees range from a high of $250 to a low of $150. | 1.2294 | 0.04250 | 109 | 85 | 23 | 1 |
2102 | an orthodox analyst doing group therapy | 1.2294 | 0.05154 | 109 | 90 | 13 | 6 |
2103 | No, there is no discount for multiple personalities. | 1.2294 | 0.04446 | 109 | 88 | 18 | 3 |
2104 | Now, tell me about your mother(s). | 1.2294 | 0.04633 | 109 | 87 | 19 | 3 |
2105 | This joke follows the rule of threes and this is the only way we could fit you all in the panel | 1.2294 | 0.04633 | 109 | 87 | 19 | 3 |
2106 | There's no easy way to say this, but I'm diagnosing you with Multiple Personalities Disorder. | 1.2294 | 0.04986 | 109 | 89 | 15 | 5 |
2107 | Yes. This is the format for Freudian group therapy | 1.2294 | 0.04986 | 109 | 89 | 15 | 5 |
2108 | Of course, your therapy will be 2/3 less effective… | 1.2294 | 0.04250 | 109 | 85 | 23 | 1 |
2109 | After you use the restroom we rotate. | 1.2294 | 0.04633 | 109 | 87 | 19 | 3 |
2110 | Okay, who is the parent, who is the child and who is the adult - such a love drama triangle... | 1.2294 | 0.04986 | 109 | 89 | 15 | 5 |
2111 | So, you just watch? | 1.2294 | 0.04986 | 109 | 89 | 15 | 5 |
2112 | My diagnosis is you have multiple personalities | 1.2294 | 0.04986 | 109 | 89 | 15 | 5 |
2113 | At this time, please insure that your therapeutic couches are in their full upright and locked position. | 1.2294 | 0.04446 | 109 | 86 | 21 | 2 |
2114 | So when did you all start believing you were the "Mod Squad"? | 1.2294 | 0.04633 | 109 | 87 | 19 | 3 |
2115 | Is this your first group therapy session? | 1.2294 | 0.04986 | 109 | 89 | 15 | 5 |
2116 | I think this will make your multiple personalities feel more comfortable. | 1.2294 | 0.04446 | 109 | 86 | 21 | 2 |
2117 | Sorry,but buy one session,get two free it was your choice... | 1.2294 | 0.04633 | 109 | 87 | 19 | 3 |
2118 | it isn't exactly multi-tasking. | 1.2294 | 0.04446 | 109 | 86 | 21 | 2 |
2119 | I'm not sure this family therapy bundle was a good idea. | 1.2294 | 0.04446 | 109 | 86 | 21 | 2 |
2120 | The tiered-cake counseling strategy always works best with ménage à trois relationship difficulties. | 1.2294 | 0.04813 | 109 | 88 | 17 | 4 |
2121 | Your psyche is structured into three parts : the ego, the superego, and the complete lack of ego. | 1.2294 | 0.04813 | 109 | 88 | 17 | 4 |
2122 | What if you're all really the same person?" | 1.2292 | 0.05437 | 96 | 79 | 12 | 5 |
2123 | Now if this group therapy seems to be a little weird, well, it is. | 1.2286 | 0.04541 | 105 | 82 | 20 | 2 |
2124 | Think of it as speed-dating for your insurers. | 1.2286 | 0.04738 | 105 | 84 | 18 | 3 |
2125 | And how does what Kate feels about what Craig feels make you feel? | 1.2286 | 0.05110 | 105 | 86 | 14 | 5 |
2126 | Today's session is Trickle Down Psychotherapy | 1.2286 | 0.04541 | 105 | 83 | 20 | 2 |
2127 | Traditional therapy just doesn't stack up to my methods. | 1.2286 | 0.05110 | 105 | 86 | 14 | 5 |
2128 | What is your position in life? | 1.2286 | 0.04334 | 105 | 82 | 22 | 1 |
2129 | Tell me about your sleep-away camp trauma. | 1.2286 | 0.04541 | 105 | 83 | 20 | 2 |
2130 | Excess emotional baggage fees will be charged separately. | 1.2286 | 0.04541 | 105 | 83 | 20 | 2 |
2131 | Craziest first. That's you, Brian. | 1.2286 | 0.04928 | 105 | 85 | 16 | 4 |
2132 | Today we’re going to talk about autonomy. | 1.2286 | 0.04334 | 105 | 82 | 22 | 1 |
2133 | Who was liked best? | 1.2286 | 0.04334 | 105 | 82 | 22 | 1 |
2134 | You all did say you wanted group therapy? | 1.2286 | 0.04738 | 105 | 84 | 18 | 3 |
2135 | Talk about rat race huh | 1.2273 | 0.05427 | 110 | 93 | 9 | 8 |
2136 | Why do you think that people don't appreciate your individuality? | 1.2273 | 0.04595 | 110 | 88 | 19 | 3 |
2137 | You will each be billed separately for the hour. | 1.2273 | 0.04595 | 110 | 88 | 19 | 3 |
2138 | Let's start with the middle child. | 1.2273 | 0.04217 | 110 | 86 | 23 | 1 |
2139 | I'd like to explore what each of you were feeling right before you were traumatized by the Final Jeopardy question the day your episode was taped... | 1.2264 | 0.04886 | 106 | 86 | 16 | 4 |
2140 | I see you used the groupon. | 1.2264 | 0.04698 | 106 | 85 | 18 | 3 |
2141 | In this test of higher consciousness, one of you will be a placebo. | 1.2258 | 0.05747 | 93 | 78 | 9 | 6 |
2142 | Is this my dream or yours? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2143 | They do not pay me enough for this shit | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2144 | If top bunk isn’t good enough for you, Marjorie, we can find you another. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 84 | 16 | 2 |
2145 | And how would you say birth order affects your relationships? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2146 | Doris, has your surge to the top been worth the sacrifice of your friends? | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2147 | Sorry for the fees hike, but my publisher isn’t interested in the "Three faces of stEVE" manuscript | 1.2255 | 0.05380 | 102 | 85 | 11 | 6 |
2148 | Whose Groupon account should I charge this week's session to? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2149 | A third of the attention, a third of the premium, hahaha! No, but seriously, let’s get started... | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2150 | Well, this is how we do it if you have a Groupon. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2151 | All of us benefit when we bring diversity to the workplace. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2152 | I promise there will be plenty of sessions for each of you to be on top | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2153 | We are now going to work on Andrea's trust issues by having her fall off the top bunk at which point you, Lennie and Bill, will catch her before she splatters on the Berber. | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2154 | What did you expect with Medicare for all? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2155 | I was thinking split the bill but separate tips. | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2156 | Well, this is why you shouldn’t buy therapy on Groupon. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2157 | So Quentin, both Julie and Don say they wish you would stop saying, 'I hear voices in my bed!'. How does that make you feel? | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 14 | 4 |
2158 | Let's go back to that part about 'not having enough time for yourself.' | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2159 | Let us begin. The family saver plan covers a combined 100 Kwords. | 1.2255 | 0.05557 | 102 | 86 | 9 | 7 |
2160 | Let's all think vertically. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2161 | What is the problem from your viewpoint? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2162 | And number three- how do I remind you of your mother? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2163 | I believe all of our problems are rooted in summer camp” | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2164 | I'm sorry we only got the second bunk, but our time is up for today. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2165 | Therapy under Bernie Sander's health plan | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2166 | Jamie, Tyler, Jayden, what do you feel is the hardest thing about being in a thruple? | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2167 | Okay, I'll just spout some psychobabble, and you guys figure out who it best applies to. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2168 | As it's a new and fragile patient stacking system - may I remind you not to sneeze.. | 1.2255 | 0.03662 | 102 | 80 | 18 | 1 |
2169 | So you feel like the man in the middle. Let's explore that. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2170 | Research out of Camp Winnipisake suggests that bunking increases communication. | 1.2255 | 0.05380 | 102 | 85 | 11 | 6 |
2171 | Well, what did you expect with the three-for-one deal? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2172 | Ok, White House Correspondents, what’s on the agenda for today? | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2173 | ... and how will you be splitting the co-pay? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2174 | I see your problem has many layers... | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2175 | So you are all addicted to Groupon. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2176 | You, in the middle row, suck it in! | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2177 | Thank you for choosing Uber’s newest programming, “Share-a-therapy, and as always, please rate me with “5 stars” if you’ve enjoyed your therapy,” | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2178 | Glad you are relaxing into our new protocol for multiple personality disorders | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2179 | So you have the same mother... | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2180 | May I see the groupon? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2181 | Discount for family group plan?; right!??? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2182 | Some people think psychiatry is a load of bunk. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2183 | Middle Bunk Syndrome is actually very common | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2184 | Yes, I can accommodate more personalities as the need arises. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2185 | You all seem to be exhibiting what the DSM 5 characterizes as "This Is Us" Disorder. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2186 | I think what we've learned here is that Timothy feels more grounded when you give him a some extra space. | 1.2255 | 0.05380 | 102 | 85 | 11 | 6 |
2187 | This is good, tell me about the domineering member of the quartet... | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2188 | When did all the lying begin? | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2189 | I'm sorry that we have to do this but we have a line of 4,000 waiting and only so much time. Let's begin with a deep breath and our mantra "I no longer fear people with masks, children, public restrooms, shopping carts, pharmacies, airlines.... | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2190 | I get it. The group sessions cost less. | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2191 | And you're feeling caught in the middle. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2192 | So is it fair to say that this has become a polyamory without the amory? | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2193 | Ask yourself, what deep in your subconscious made you ask if there is a discount rate for siblings. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2194 | And what would you say you find most stressful about your coworking space? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2195 | Well, I think you've all arrived! We at Cheapo Counseling recognize you have many choices in mental health services. We thank you for choosing Cheapo. | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2196 | So you signed up for the discounted group plan? | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2197 | And how does that make all of you feel? | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2198 | I see the Superego has taken the top bunk again. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2199 | You got it on groupon as well? | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2200 | In my vast experience as a Freudian psychoanalyst, it stems from the mother, and trickles down from there. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2201 | Is this everyone's first time in group therapy? | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2202 | I saw you in "This Is Us." So I already know your problems. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2203 | Uber Therapy Pool | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2204 | Why do YOU think summer camp didn't live up to your expectations? | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2205 | Do you feel like you live in the shadow of your siblings? | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2206 | Now that you've witnessed how ineffective this therapy arrangement is, are any of you ready for a private consultation? | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2207 | I think it's pretty obvious who the middle child is among you. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2208 | You are my trifecta: 13 total personalities, each billed separately. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2209 | Just to clarify, your goal is full integration of mind and body? | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2210 | You're the ones that wanted to use a Groupon. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2211 | And of course I will keep that in the strictest confidence, 2 pm Bottom. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2212 | One out of three is not bad. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2213 | The mental health coverage deductible you have chosen.... | 1.2255 | 0.04158 | 102 | 79 | 22 | 0 |
2214 | There is a clear manifestation of multiple personalities here. | 1.2255 | 0.05380 | 102 | 85 | 11 | 6 |
2215 | Patient number two - please describe your idea of a perfect date. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2216 | Did everyone give the receptionist their groupon code? | 1.2255 | 0.04158 | 102 | 79 | 23 | 0 |
2217 | I think there's been a misunderstanding. I sell furniture. | 1.2255 | 0.05380 | 102 | 85 | 11 | 6 |
2218 | I'm sorry for your confusion, but the sign clearly says THREE-apist | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2219 | Since you all are feeling insignificant I decided to get you all out of the way at once. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2220 | When they said group therapy, this is not what I had in mind... | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2221 | We will start at the top today and rotate next session. It is all about sharing . | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2222 | I call this individualized group therapy | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2223 | This isn't what I was thinking when she asked if we could carpool to therapy | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2224 | Welcome to the first of the 10 group therapy sessions you purchased on Groupon.com | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2225 | This will not help with your mental issues, but it does help prepare you for mass incarceration. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2226 | How do you all feel about that? | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2227 | I thought it would be nice For our little group, and it would also help Jonathan with his unnatural fear of bunk beds | 1.2255 | 0.03918 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 0 |
2228 | How do each of you feel about your HMO? | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2229 | Your odds are one in three. | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2230 | Before we start, here are my ground rules: First, no cookie jokes. Second, no sandwich jokes. Third, no ménage-à-trois discounts. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2231 | Thank you, Larry. And exactly when did you start feeling this loss of individuality? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2232 | Each of you gets twenty minutes to spill his or her guts. Who wants to go first ? | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2233 | Next question is for contestant number 3. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2234 | Multi tier or scaleable? To-may-to to-mah-to. It's all therapy. | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 3 |
2235 | I think it's time we begin talking about termination given you started your therapy 35 years ago and still havn't worked out who gets which bunk bed. | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2236 | Jeremy, you're in the wrong cartoon, and ditch the tie | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2237 | Well, you all wanted me to fit you in. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2238 | Yes, each “personality” will need to pay. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2239 | Welcome to "Overcoming My Fear Of Bunkbeds" seminar. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2240 | I'm sorry, your 5 minutes are up. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2241 | Well now, Seems like you're all in this together | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2242 | You know, your group therapy sessions will be useless if you start snoring! | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2243 | Before we get to what brings you here today, let me just say, you are all amazing. | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2244 | Groupon? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2245 | I asked my new scheduling assistant to stack my clients. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2246 | Again, apologies--I didn't mean to stack my appointments. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2247 | We'll handle the Groupon at the end. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2248 | We're going to take this one level at a time. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2249 | ...and I promise to give each of you the individual attention you deserve. Now, about those confidentiality waivers... | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2250 | There, now will you stop complaining about the wait times? | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2251 | So, you think the issue may be an unconscious sense of hierarchy among you siblings? | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2252 | Now we'll deal with Mary who still wets the bed | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2253 | No. It's not called "stacking". We call it "constructive interaction." | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2254 | So what makes you think you suffer from multiple personality disorder? | 1.2255 | 0.04158 | 102 | 79 | 23 | 0 |
2255 | Your answers to my questions will be recorded and machine-scored. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2256 | Now, tell me more about that comet your waiting for so you can leave this planet and why. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2257 | I'm sorry, but the group rate does not include doctor-patient confidentiality. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2258 | Let’s role-play birth order trauma. Lucy, now you get in the middle bunk. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2259 | Sorry, I can't give you the group rate... you all have different problems. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2260 | Tell me why do you deserve the top bunk. | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2261 | ahhh yes, budget cuts. You're all here to complain about your spouse anyway. Heck, I'll start. | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2262 | I have a theory, but you're welcome to debunk it. | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2263 | I want you all to relax and take a deep breath. Mr. Brown please tell me why you don’t believe Harry is your son. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2264 | So let's first talk about voting for 'Medicare for All.' | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2265 | And this is what we call “Goldilocks Syndrome” | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2266 | How much caffeine have you all been having? | 1.2255 | 0.05557 | 102 | 86 | 9 | 7 |
2267 | Welcome to "Shrink on a budget"! You will each have exactly 16.67 minutes to talk with no charge for eavesdropping. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2268 | Get over it! Birth order does NOT determine triplet middle children! | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2269 | Your insurance doesn't cover you for the top bunk, Gerard. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2270 | Let's first acknowledge that the patience and teamwork required to build such a thing together means that your relationship is not too far gone. | 1.2255 | 0.04158 | 102 | 83 | 17 | 2 |
2271 | One more session, and then I'll choose. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2272 | Healthcare for all(at once), America’s solution to affordable healthcare. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2273 | Look, the fees are only one-third what they'd normally be. | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2274 | Ahmmmm, Third level therapy still requires casual dress. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2275 | The ad was correct. It’s a three bed apartment. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2276 | Yes, the Groupon did say three for one - three people, one session. | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2277 | Until, now, my office was too small for family therapy. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 80 | 19 | 2 |
2278 | And how long has top bunk been making you feel that way, bottom bunk? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2279 | Oh no! triple booked again? | 1.2255 | 0.04158 | 102 | 79 | 23 | 0 |
2280 | Same sperm donor, eh? | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2281 | Please, don't all free associate at once. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2282 | Susan, Jackson, Billy welcome to your first “living with multiple personality disorder” session. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2283 | As I said I first want to debunk the idea that you are all not being treated fairly in life | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2284 | You realize you are paying less | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2285 | I hope you don't think this is a 3 for the price of 1 session. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2286 | This experiment will probably end badly, but since all of you share a car ride together, I’m willing to give it try. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2287 | Even with the new approach, Henry felt forgotten as the middle child. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2288 | Don't be embarrassed, tiers are a normal part of the process | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2289 | It does seem unfair that the guy on the bottom gets the most space. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2290 | You say these feelings started after you all left the Navy? | 1.2255 | 0.05196 | 102 | 84 | 13 | 5 |
2291 | I hope you're as pleased as I am with your level of progress. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2292 | Throuples therapy can be challenging. | 1.2255 | 0.04602 | 102 | 81 | 19 | 2 |
2293 | It's actually just group therapy by definition...you have my undivided attention. | 1.2255 | 0.05006 | 102 | 83 | 15 | 4 |
2294 | I'm pretty sure your issues with sibling rivalry have already been debunked. | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 80 | 21 | 1 |
2295 | Welcome to our first Groupon therapy session. I hope no one has a fear of falling and if so, we’ll start with that... | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 79 | 21 | 1 |
2296 | Today let's delve into your feelings of inadequacy and lack of individuality. | 1.2255 | 0.04386 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 2 |
2297 | Okay, tell me the story from top to bottom. | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2298 | In your case, I think that exploring your multiple personalities went two far | 1.2255 | 0.04808 | 102 | 82 | 17 | 3 |
2299 | You'll each have to poll above 10% to participate in the next session. | 1.2255 | 0.05380 | 102 | 85 | 11 | 6 |
2300 | It works perfectly when you all have the same problem. | 1.2245 | 0.04707 | 98 | 78 | 18 | 2 |
2301 | If you wake up naked just remember we're all family here. | 1.2245 | 0.04925 | 98 | 79 | 16 | 3 |
2302 | Are you feeling anger towards Groupon? | 1.2243 | 0.04844 | 107 | 87 | 16 | 4 |
2303 | We’ll start with you Jeffery... how does Ted’s memories make you feel? | 1.2233 | 0.05150 | 103 | 85 | 13 | 5 |
2304 | I understand it was difficult for you all when your joint venture in chaise bunk beds went bankrupt | 1.2233 | 0.05150 | 103 | 85 | 13 | 5 |
2305 | And why do Id and Ego never get the top bunk? | 1.2233 | 0.05332 | 103 | 86 | 11 | 6 |
2306 | Perhaps you have an unusual attachment to each other. | 1.2233 | 0.04962 | 103 | 84 | 15 | 4 |
2307 | Which one of you said last week said you dream of sandwiches? | 1.2233 | 0.04562 | 103 | 82 | 19 | 2 |
2308 | Welcome to our inaugural psychologist b&b session | 1.2233 | 0.04562 | 103 | 85 | 15 | 3 |
2309 | Today we will be reliving the traumas of summer camp. Carol, you first. | 1.2233 | 0.04962 | 103 | 84 | 15 | 4 |
2310 | It’s true; much of psychiatry Is bunk. | 1.2233 | 0.04766 | 103 | 83 | 17 | 3 |
2311 | Part of the problem is that you're always on top of one another. | 1.2233 | 0.04348 | 103 | 81 | 21 | 1 |
2312 | I'd like to thank all of your personalities for joining us today. | 1.2233 | 0.04562 | 103 | 82 | 19 | 2 |
2313 | Um, sorry, remind me again...which one of you was the bedwetter? | 1.2233 | 0.04962 | 103 | 84 | 15 | 4 |
2314 | This is not what we meant by 'Three sessions for the price of one!' | 1.2233 | 0.04562 | 103 | 82 | 19 | 2 |
2315 | And when did you first feel this loss of individualism? | 1.2233 | 0.04124 | 103 | 80 | 23 | 0 |
2316 | You’ve been invited here today to help debunk the myth of the id, the ego, and the super ego plus save some dough. | 1.2232 | 0.04522 | 112 | 90 | 19 | 3 |
2317 | You did the best you could, the best you knew how at the time. | 1.2222 | 0.04665 | 99 | 79 | 18 | 2 |
2318 | Just so you know. Therapy is cheaper by the dozen. | 1.2222 | 0.04881 | 99 | 80 | 16 | 3 |
2319 | No one said: "Medicare for All" would be "Medicare for Each Individual. | 1.2212 | 0.04918 | 104 | 85 | 15 | 4 |
2320 | Time’s up! | 1.2212 | 0.04918 | 104 | 85 | 15 | 4 |
2321 | Before we begin, let’s go through the terms and conditions of this Groupon deal. | 1.2200 | 0.05041 | 100 | 82 | 14 | 4 |
2322 | Sorry, but couch space is really at a premium here in Manhattan. | 1.2200 | 0.04837 | 100 | 81 | 16 | 3 |
2323 | Tell me about your mother... and your mother... and your mother | 1.2200 | 0.04837 | 100 | 81 | 16 | 3 |
2324 | Birth order continues to impact lives through adulthood. | 1.2200 | 0.04623 | 100 | 80 | 18 | 2 |
2325 | Well, Marci has a fear of heights, Tom has issues with being a middle child and Tracy has low self esteem | 1.2200 | 0.04837 | 100 | 81 | 16 | 3 |
2326 | We call this hat trick therapy. | 1.2200 | 0.04623 | 100 | 80 | 18 | 2 |
2327 | Sorry kids but my flight leaves LaGuardia in 90 minutes. So who's first? | 1.2200 | 0.05041 | 100 | 82 | 14 | 3 |
2328 | And why do you feel like you're never the center of attention? | 1.2200 | 0.04837 | 100 | 81 | 16 | 3 |
2329 | So let’s talk about your Groupon addiction. | 1.2198 | 0.05806 | 91 | 77 | 8 | 6 |
2330 | So what I'm hearing is that all of you have abandonment issues. | 1.2178 | 0.04582 | 101 | 81 | 18 | 2 |
2331 | Your unique problem happens to everyone. | 1.2178 | 0.04582 | 101 | 81 | 18 | 2 |
2332 | what did you expect when I offered you all a 2/3rds promotional discount on therapy | 1.2178 | 0.04361 | 101 | 80 | 20 | 1 |
2333 | This should prepare you for a long quarantine on a cruise ship. | 1.2178 | 0.04361 | 101 | 80 | 20 | 1 |
2334 | Say more about not feeling seen as an individual. | 1.2178 | 0.04582 | 101 | 81 | 18 | 2 |
2335 | Look, I know it's not ideal but don't forget you're getting a 30% discount! | 1.2178 | 0.04794 | 101 | 82 | 16 | 3 |
2336 | Your image of layered past selves is normal and represents growth. | 1.2178 | 0.04794 | 101 | 82 | 16 | 3 |
2337 | It's not favoritism. He is being treated for a fear of heights. | 1.2178 | 0.05190 | 101 | 84 | 12 | 5 |
2338 | Before I got my license? I was a flight attendant for Spirit Airlines... Why do you ask? | 1.2178 | 0.04996 | 101 | 83 | 14 | 4 |
2339 | Let's discuss your fear of pancakes. | 1.2178 | 0.04996 | 101 | 83 | 14 | 4 |
2340 | So tell me, how long have you been hearing these voices. | 1.2178 | 0.04582 | 101 | 81 | 18 | 2 |
2341 | You each have 90 seconds. Let’s start from the top. | 1.2178 | 0.04361 | 101 | 80 | 20 | 1 |
2342 | Thank you all for coming in. I’m sure that, together, we can debunk this problem. | 1.2178 | 0.04794 | 101 | 84 | 13 | 4 |
2343 | You can speak freely. I specialize in multiple personality disorders. | 1.2178 | 0.04794 | 101 | 82 | 16 | 3 |
2344 | You are all suffering from tripolar disease. | 1.2178 | 0.04794 | 101 | 82 | 16 | 3 |
2345 | If you wanted personal service you should have selected CounselingX, not CounselingPool | 1.2178 | 0.04794 | 101 | 82 | 16 | 3 |
2346 | Ok in group therapy we start at the bottom. | 1.2178 | 0.04996 | 101 | 83 | 14 | 4 |
2347 | And why do you think you struggle to be heard? | 1.2178 | 0.04361 | 101 | 80 | 20 | 1 |
2348 | Relax. I’m just here to debunk your anxieties. | 1.2178 | 0.04582 | 101 | 81 | 18 | 2 |
2349 | Be careful, Lorraine, up there on that top bunk. Last Thursday, a patient fell and broke her hip after a Freudian slip. | 1.2178 | 0.04996 | 101 | 83 | 14 | 4 |
2350 | Oh my dears. It's not a threesome if you use bunk beds. | 1.2178 | 0.04582 | 101 | 81 | 18 | 2 |
2351 | And your turn number three. How does that make you feel? | 1.2178 | 0.04582 | 101 | 81 | 18 | 2 |
2352 | No, it's not really group therapy, since hugging will be impossible. | 1.2178 | 0.04996 | 101 | 83 | 14 | 4 |
2353 | Your health insurance covers only semi-private group sessions. | 1.2178 | 0.04582 | 101 | 81 | 18 | 2 |
2354 | It's like a ride-share for your childhood trauma | 1.2178 | 0.04794 | 101 | 82 | 16 | 3 |
2355 | Now tell me your perspective. | 1.2178 | 0.04794 | 101 | 82 | 16 | 3 |
2356 | What pronoun does this come with? | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2357 | Really? I've never heard of an 'evil triplet' before. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2358 | Okay, that's enough bunk for one session. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2359 | I see your troubles have tripled since last week. | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2360 | Let me explain the difference, this is called Groupon therapy | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2361 | So when did you first realize that your ménage à trois was not working out | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2362 | America, we all have same issues. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2363 | It's definitely Single Personality Disorder, but the good news is that I'll charge you as one client. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2364 | I see you are using the Groupon today. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2365 | Relax, this is family therapy | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2366 | Paul Lynde for the block! | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2367 | You would be surprised how many problems have their root in berth order. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2368 | If you all agree to the same personal hang-up, I can give you the psychotherapy group rate this month. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2369 | No, Super-ego, you can't change places with Id. You've countermanded him twice today and you keep interrupting Ego's monologue. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2370 | It's our innovative approach to thruples therapy. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2371 | Multiple Person Disorder is not a thing. | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2372 | In store psychiatry clinics at COSTCO | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2373 | Now remind me, which one of you says you’re experiencing boundary issues? | 1.2165 | 0.04203 | 97 | 76 | 21 | 0 |
2374 | So, which one of you is the super-ego? | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2375 | I’m beginning to realize this group therapy session is a lot of bunk. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2376 | Health Care for all.... So tell me about your dreams. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2377 | Super, we’ll start with you, and work on down to Id. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2378 | I'm afraid our time is up and up and up. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2379 | We all make choices, your choice was to choose the cheapest managed care plan... | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2380 | Before we begin, a reminder that there is no excess baggage allowed with your economy session. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2381 | but you all chose polyamory, so whats the problem? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 77 | 17 | 2 |
2382 | Now, let’s consider an alternative perspective. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2383 | The 16.66 minute hour. | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2384 | I am for "medicare for all... together". | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2385 | Try to recall when you first felt unimportant. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2386 | Listen up. Yes, the new Group Therapy Family Discount Plan does allow for a ten minute nap break. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2387 | This appears to be a clear case of multiple personalities | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2388 | One, two, three, upper, middle, lower. Where do YOU think you belong?” | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2389 | well, why do you think this wasn't what you had in mind when you asked about a family discount" | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2390 | Maybe Groupon is not the best for EVERY business. | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2391 | Why don’t we take it from the top? | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2392 | Friends and family discount. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2393 | I’m glad to offer this reduced rate therapy. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2394 | So which one of you used to pee the bed? | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2395 | You say you all have gender issues -your whole family? | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2396 | I'll bring back the ladder if you tell me who's sleeping with who. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2397 | I understand your nervous. I was too when I first tried UberPool. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2398 | Can you compliment her on getting up there without a ladder? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2399 | I just can't seem to get any time for myself | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2400 | Anything you say here is safe with me. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2401 | Settle down. It’s better than two pair. | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2402 | Didn't you learn to look someone in the eyes when you talk to them? | 1.2165 | 0.05719 | 97 | 83 | 7 | 7 |
2403 | It's your mother It's your mother It's your mother | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2404 | No, Aaron, you were Id last week. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2405 | Welcome to Costco Psychotherapy | 1.2165 | 0.04203 | 97 | 76 | 21 | 0 |
2406 | It may seem like you have multiple personality disorder, but I don't think that's the case. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2407 | -I feel people don't take me seriously. -Please wait for your turn sr. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2408 | It seems like all you see is what divides you. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2409 | So, as one of triplets, who wants to say what it feels like to never be treated as an individual? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2410 | Sarah, please uncross your legs. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2411 | Just one small quibble. Shouldn’t it be “This is We? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2412 | The whole world is watching psychiatric patients, while the patients are watching TV. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2413 | Everybody gets Xanax! | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2414 | In the name of efficiency, I need to tell you that nobody cares about your problems. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2415 | It’s not that unusual when you consider the cost of a four bedroom in the Hamptons. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2416 | The newest millennial experience: story time with “Mom” | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2417 | Yes, most of the rumors surrounding my practice have been debunked. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2418 | I'd like to start with the one who "speaks no evil". | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2419 | Budget cuts. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2420 | Okay, which one of you is not on their diet? | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2421 | Yeah, well I think that's a lot of bunk. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 81 | 10 | 5 |
2422 | It's not a disorder if there actually are three of you. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2423 | Economy therapy sessions now available after 3pm! | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2424 | If you both want a closer relationship with your son, let's start by having him in the middle chair. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2425 | This is how we can pay for Medicare for all...how do we like it? | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2426 | And you ALL have had inklings of a former life as sardines? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2427 | Which one of you is Us? | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2428 | This is what you get with an ACA bronze plan | 1.2165 | 0.04203 | 97 | 76 | 21 | 0 |
2429 | 'There were no right or wrong answers in a tense final round of 'Therapy!'' | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2430 | Let's make this quick. Netflix is removing Frasier from it's line up and I'm only on season 5. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2431 | Excuse me! That question was meant for your middle self. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2432 | Feel lucky—not everyone gets this much legroom. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2433 | Patient Number Three, if you were on a date with Patient Number Two and your therapist texted to ask how best to respond to what Patient Number One just shared, would you recommend all caps?" | 1.2165 | 0.05528 | 97 | 82 | 9 | 6 |
2434 | Next time on This is Us.... | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2435 | So, tell me about this interdependence thing. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2436 | When did you first come to know that you'd been ordained Queen Bitch? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2437 | If you're familiar with UberPool you'll get the hang of this pretty quickly. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2438 | So your parents don't think you stack up, is that what I'm hearing? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2439 | You'll experience 3 distinct stages. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2440 | And are you always dissatisfied with your position in life? | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2441 | I’m sorry, number 2, but exactly why do you feel three-tier psychotherapy is impersonal? | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 78 | 15 | 3 |
2442 | Do you enjoy being on top? | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2443 | I think this is a breakthrough. Your Id, Ego, and Superego seem to all be working together. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2444 | So last week Rita was on top, Jim in second and Pete finished third. Let's see who has the best dream today! | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2445 | I'm not listening to any of your bunk. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2446 | And... you're triplets? | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2447 | Ok, maybe you can start by telling me why you feel that people aren't giving you their undivided attention. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2448 | Sorry. Reaching the 'next level' didn't really change much for me. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2449 | Look at it this way: Hell has at least twice as many levels. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2450 | Being on top is not all it's cracked up to be, or not. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2451 | Well Eve, I did say I'd give you a multi personality discount... | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2452 | Thank you for coming early. My son has a T-ball game at 2. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2453 | Each or your insurance plans cut my bill by 2/3 - I'm demonstrating my new "Patient Efficiency Initiative"! | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2454 | So, why do you think you feel like a third wheel? | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2455 | Customer service means everything...would you agree this is an improvement over one bed for three? | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 79 | 16 | 2 |
2456 | It's important that you rotate each week in order to avoid the dreaded "Lower Couch Inferiority Complex" | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2457 | It's just a visualization tool. Let's start with the middle child. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2458 | First, I'd like to assure you that I treat my Groupon patients no differently than those who pay full price... | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2459 | I told you not to buy the Groupon deal. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2460 | Sorry about this, but I still have to pack. | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2461 | Thank you for sharing that. Now, let’s shear what your other personalities want to say about your mother. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2462 | The diagnosis: three patents, one personality. How to bill ? | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2463 | This Groupon thing isn't working. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2464 | Group therapy for the individual. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2465 | Which one of you wets the bed? | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2466 | This is not group therapy, it is individual therapy with no insurance! | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2467 | I know you expected to pay 1/3 of my normal rate,but with the extra overhead I'll have to charge you 50%. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2468 | That's just a lot of bunk | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 77 | 15 | 3 |
2469 | Group therapy is a real timesaver | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 78 | 15 | 3 |
2470 | Raise your hand if you are feeling out of place. | 1.2165 | 0.04203 | 97 | 76 | 21 | 0 |
2471 | We had a Groupon. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2472 | I'm sorry. This Groupon is good for a single Jungian analysis session only. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2473 | Relax - and remember,you will each have a turn as the middle child. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2474 | I'm hearing that one of you is down in the dumps and another is on top of the world... | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2475 | OK, you on top, you are super-ego, in the middle, you are ego and you on the bottom, you are the id. Now figure it out. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2476 | OK...let's take it from the top again. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2477 | But Marcia, Greg is still your brother, step or not. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2478 | This isn’t the way we learned it in college but the HMO’s are really cutting back on my fees. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2479 | Ok, so perhaps each of you would like to start by telling me how you FEEL about the health care system... | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2480 | Freud did some groundbreaking work on threeways, yes. So tell me about your mothers." | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2481 | No, you’re in Group Therapy IKEA. Group Therapy Hygge is down the hall. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2482 | In my practice I have never encountered a case of Multiple Body Disorder. May I publish? | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2483 | Welcome to diversity therapy with rotating couches each session. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2484 | I'll never get away this summer things are so stacked up at work. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2485 | I'm afraid you three are disturbed on too many levels for me to be of assistance... | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2486 | In my experience all unhappy families are alike. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 79 | 16 | 2 |
2487 | So, the hive mind? It's not a real thing. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2488 | This is the family rate so get used to it. | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2489 | What did you expect when you purchased time with a therapist on Groupon? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2490 | So how did summer camp impact your inability to sleep alone? | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2491 | "No, it's not from Ikea. I actually got it at Home Depot." | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2492 | And why do you suppose you are still hung up on hierarchy? | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2493 | You should have read the small print on your Groupon. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2494 | I truly value patient confidentiality, so please be sure to pretend no else is here when it's your turn. | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2495 | Group therapy, yes, but group therapy with respect for tradition. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2496 | Eenie....tell meanie again, was it minee or moe that kept confusing things? | 1.2165 | 0.05528 | 97 | 82 | 9 | 6 |
2497 | Triple layer nuts. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2498 | Would you like to split the tab? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2499 | YES, I WILL ONLY CHARGE YOU EACH FOR 1/3 OF A SESSION. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2500 | I understand that your problems have stacked up. | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2501 | I'm so glad you all decided to come back home for thanksgiving. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2502 | Yes. Ménage à trois therapy is a specialty of mine. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2503 | No, the group rate only applies if you all have the same problems and respond to the same therapies. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2504 | Once again from the top, please? | 1.2165 | 0.05528 | 97 | 82 | 9 | 6 |
2505 | So how long have you all worked together? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2506 | The results of "Medicare for All at Once" | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2507 | You, on the top -- go first. You have to be the most desperate to have climbed up there. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2508 | I think a lot of these issues stem from Middle Child Syndrome | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2509 | You feel that Amber gets the most support in the group? | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2510 | Some people say we have separation anxiety. | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2511 | Just to be clear, how long do we have until your group acupuncture appointment? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2512 | I think you may have issues with codependancy. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2513 | Veterans Mental Health Psychatrist: Of course there’s patient Dr. confidentiality when one is talking the other stick your fingers in your ears | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2514 | But couldn't your agoraphobia actually be a mild case of vertigo? | 1.2165 | 0.04452 | 97 | 77 | 19 | 1 |
2515 | If you're happy with today's session, please give me a review on Groupon. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 78 | 15 | 3 |
2516 | Have you considered moving out of Manhattan? | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2517 | One of you really needs to drop out. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2518 | So Jane, can you explain why you feel superior to the rest of the group? | 1.2165 | 0.05124 | 97 | 80 | 13 | 4 |
2519 | It's your mother's fault. Your mother's fault. Your mother's fault... | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2520 | Don't worry, Nathan. I think Diane meant an emotional collapse. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2521 | The myth of the multiple patient disorder has been debunked. | 1.2165 | 0.05330 | 97 | 81 | 11 | 5 |
2522 | If you all talk at the same time you’ll get the full hour. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2523 | Patient number two; describe your dreamiest session. | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2524 | So you think your issues stem from your helicopter parents? | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2525 | And what are YOUR goals, Mr. Middleman" | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2526 | Who had the distant mother again? | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2527 | This takes sharing and caring to another level. | 1.2165 | 0.04687 | 97 | 78 | 17 | 2 |
2528 | When I suggested a triple session, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind... | 1.2165 | 0.04910 | 97 | 79 | 15 | 3 |
2529 | Let's talk about why we're all here - compartmentalization. | 1.2157 | 0.04951 | 102 | 84 | 14 | 4 |
2530 | He really took ‘test group’ to a whole new level | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2531 | Although unusual, I know a tripolar disorder when I see it. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2532 | Let's start with BottomBunk: did you wear a tie because you have unresolved mommy issues? | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2533 | Therapy Groupon | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2534 | Hi, I'm Beth. I'll be your camp counselor this summer. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2535 | So tell me again, which one of you is Id? | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2536 | This deal is only good on wednesdays at 2 o'clock. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2537 | Seat assignments are temporary, just until I learn names. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2538 | Welcome to the first session of our "Fear of Intimacy in Bed" group. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2539 | Last time I sign up for a mind altering threesome. | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
2540 | I can't seem to escape my problems...they just follow me wherever I go. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2541 | Your 55 minutes times 3 are up. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2542 | One at a time now -- how is your relationship with your mother? | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2543 | I see. How do you feel about that, and that, and that? | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
2544 | Will that be three separate checks or just one ? | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2545 | Who's first? | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
2546 | Did you read the Groupon fine print? | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2547 | These GROUPON deals are getting ridiculous | 1.2143 | 0.04412 | 98 | 78 | 19 | 1 |
2548 | How do you feel about my new furniture | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
2549 | Lisa you are above this. Gary you can only go up from here. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2550 | I guess we are gathered here today because Sally's bedwetting problems are really stacking up. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2551 | Multi-level marketing therapy starts with establishing your level of involvement. | 1.2143 | 0.04412 | 98 | 78 | 19 | 1 |
2552 | Who else, who else feels alone? | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
2553 | I didn’t think psychology camp would make us bunk up. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2554 | First of all, welcome to discount Mondays! | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2555 | Now that you've experienced mindfulness, you may return to your SAT exams.” | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2556 | I don't want to hear any whining, Jeff. When you get better insurance, you can have the top bunk. Now, where were we? | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2557 | Think of it as a stacked bar graph and please don't all talk at once. | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
2558 | You’ll still each owe me your individual copays. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2559 | Tell me about your Camp Mother. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2560 | We're going to make you one again. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2561 | As your new therapist I am required to thank you for accepting the new group insurance policy... | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2562 | Does it relieve or increase your anxiety to know that I ordered this from Nikea, a Chinese knock-off that only prints assembly instructions in Mandarin? | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
2563 | You should've looked at the fine print when you signed up for low-cost mental health coverage. Now, regarding your mothers. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2564 | I understand you didn't want to go there, but you are in a ShrinkPOOL. | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
2565 | Well, birth order is a quantifiable thing, get over it. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2566 | Life isn't a competition. If you show me you understand that maybe you can be the one on top the next session. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2567 | From where I’m sitting, it looks like things are looking up for you. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2568 | Manhattan parking attendant, why do you ask? | 1.2143 | 0.04412 | 98 | 78 | 19 | 1 |
2569 | Three really is a crowd! | 1.2143 | 0.05077 | 98 | 81 | 13 | 4 |
2570 | You say Amzon makes you feel small and undervalued. Is that because you deserve it? | 1.2143 | 0.03626 | 98 | 79 | 19 | 0 |
2571 | And what was it about sleep-away camp that you feel traumatized you? | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2572 | My approach might seem unconventional, but no one has managed to debunk my success. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2573 | It's clear you're suffering from repressed anxieties over your berth order. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2574 | Athos, Porthos and Aramis, let's start from the beginning." | 1.2143 | 0.05280 | 98 | 82 | 11 | 5 |
2575 | Managed care of the future. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2576 | I think we really covered a lot today... that concludes groupon therapy . | 1.2143 | 0.04412 | 98 | 78 | 19 | 1 |
2577 | Tracy, if you could stick to discussing your political anxieties, it would help everyone get helpful counsel. | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2578 | And how did that Groupon purchase make you feel? | 1.2143 | 0.04644 | 98 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2579 | So tell me, which on of you is undecided? | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2580 | If you wanted individual sessions, you shouldn't have booked online with 'TherapyDeal.com' | 1.2143 | 0.04412 | 98 | 78 | 19 | 1 |
2581 | As you may have guessed, my practice is strictly limited to clients in a menage a trois. | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2582 | I'd encourage y'all to reflect on the thought processes that brought you into my office today. Number One: Assuming that "Group Therapy" and "Groupon Therapy" were one and the same..... | 1.2143 | 0.04865 | 98 | 80 | 15 | 3 |
2583 | Complimentary breakfast and therapy at Betty's Bay Area Hostel | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2584 | Group therapy only works if everyone admits they're on the same level. | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 79 | 17 | 2 |
2585 | Alright, next week John gets the top bunk. | 1.2121 | 0.04130 | 99 | 78 | 21 | 0 |
2586 | There's no 'I' in throuple's therapy. | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2587 | Is this OK? We could also go by age or perhaps IQ. | 1.2121 | 0.05030 | 99 | 82 | 13 | 4 |
2588 | These Groupons are getting ridiculous. | 1.2121 | 0.04130 | 99 | 78 | 21 | 0 |
2589 | I’m sorry, but I have to do everything in multiples of three. | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2590 | So, there have been some budget cuts | 1.2121 | 0.04372 | 99 | 79 | 19 | 1 |
2591 | Now which one of you is it that has the fear of heights? | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2592 | Tell me how you first began triangulating. | 1.2121 | 0.05231 | 99 | 83 | 11 | 5 |
2593 | Which of you is the middle child? | 1.2121 | 0.04130 | 99 | 78 | 21 | 0 |
2594 | Before we get started, I am obliged to tell you that the pre-authorization by your respective insurance plans is not a guarantee of payment for this service. | 1.2121 | 0.05030 | 99 | 82 | 13 | 4 |
2595 | We all have the same issues. | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 16 | 2 |
2596 | So how does that make you and your other identities feel? | 1.2121 | 0.04372 | 99 | 79 | 19 | 1 |
2597 | Yes, depression is most definitely hereditary. | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2598 | Remind me, again... Who's having the problem with drugs and who's having the issues with authority? | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2599 | Oy vey | 1.2121 | 0.04372 | 99 | 79 | 19 | 1 |
2600 | Yes, most insurance covers group therapy as well as sprained ankles." | 1.2121 | 0.05231 | 99 | 83 | 11 | 5 |
2601 | Thank you for taking advantage of our Groupon promotion. | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2602 | We make the profit and you get the discount. | 1.2121 | 0.05030 | 99 | 82 | 13 | 4 |
2603 | Your previous therapist’s method has been debunked | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2604 | So, do you have the 3 for 1 Groupon? | 1.2121 | 0.04372 | 99 | 79 | 19 | 1 |
2605 | Sorry, my last appointment was cellmate group therapy | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2606 | Emotional support is much like Trickle Down Economics. | 1.2121 | 0.05030 | 99 | 82 | 13 | 4 |
2607 | Well if you had taken the time to read the brochure carefully you would have seen that it clearly states "threerapy." | 1.2121 | 0.05030 | 99 | 82 | 13 | 4 |
2608 | So far, none of you are stacking up. | 1.2121 | 0.04372 | 99 | 79 | 19 | 1 |
2609 | Do you have a strong support system? | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2610 | Yes, the goal of Group Therapy is to be able to share our feelings. However, Louise, I don't think it helps to argue over whose turn it is for the lower couch. | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2611 | Kevin, Randall, Kate, I'm sorry. This is our last session. Your stories just don't make me cry anymore. | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2612 | After this session, you’ll have the opportunity to rate your experience and to leave an optional tip. | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2613 | Yes, it IS group therapy but you still must respond in order. Now, starting from the top...Miss Franklin? | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2614 | So remind me Are you the group with separation anxiety or economic fixations over group discounts? | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2615 | You each have intimacy issues; my rent just went through the roof. Work with me, people, work with me! | 1.2121 | 0.04003 | 99 | 80 | 18 | 1 |
2616 | Relationship therapy for the modern love-triangle | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2617 | OK, let's begin this initial free association group therapy session. | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2618 | Not all together, PLEASE! | 1.2121 | 0.05030 | 99 | 82 | 13 | 4 |
2619 | Why do you say Mom was on top ? | 1.2121 | 0.04372 | 99 | 79 | 19 | 1 |
2620 | The king size is only available if you pay out of pocket. | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2621 | Welcome to the family therapy support group | 1.2121 | 0.05231 | 99 | 83 | 11 | 5 |
2622 | I think you will find my experimental hybrid of group and individual therapy very helpful. | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2623 | I heard psychiatry was bunk, doc, but I never expected this. | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2624 | Who knew group therapy would be this relaxing? | 1.2121 | 0.04602 | 99 | 80 | 17 | 2 |
2625 | So you don't believe that Freudian psychoanalysis has been debunked. | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2626 | I'm your camp counselor. | 1.2121 | 0.04821 | 99 | 81 | 15 | 3 |
2627 | Have you tried talking to Mr. Roper? | 1.2115 | 0.04668 | 104 | 85 | 16 | 3 |
2628 | It would help if all three of you had the same issue... | 1.2105 | 0.04708 | 95 | 77 | 16 | 2 |
2629 | Welcome to therapy pool. | 1.2105 | 0.04708 | 95 | 77 | 16 | 2 |
2630 | And finally... let's hear from you in the middle | 1.2105 | 0.04463 | 95 | 76 | 18 | 1 |
2631 | Now Eric, why do you think you deserve the top bunk? | 1.2105 | 0.04463 | 95 | 76 | 18 | 1 |
2632 | Ed, stop - you're superego NEXT week. | 1.2105 | 0.04463 | 95 | 76 | 18 | 1 |
2633 | I think there was a misunderstanding. I suggested we could use more *patience* in these sessions. | 1.2105 | 0.04708 | 95 | 77 | 16 | 2 |
2634 | Welcome all to our introductory session in the Safe Practice of Ménage à Trois. | 1.2105 | 0.05161 | 95 | 79 | 12 | 4 |
2635 | And what about you number two,Do you feel the same as either number one or number three? | 1.2105 | 0.04708 | 95 | 77 | 16 | 2 |
2636 | We're here to debunk your individual victimhood theories | 1.2105 | 0.05161 | 95 | 79 | 12 | 4 |
2637 | Okay, when Mom broke up the pillow fight, how did that make you feel? | 1.2105 | 0.04463 | 95 | 76 | 18 | 1 |
2638 | Become One! | 1.2105 | 0.05161 | 95 | 79 | 12 | 4 |
2639 | So to recap, you feel like the walls are closing in? Or just the ceiling and floors? | 1.2105 | 0.05161 | 95 | 79 | 12 | 4 |
2640 | Okay, that concludes today's session and Costco closes in fifteen minutes if you need mayonnaise or a big screen TV? Jodi Felton, Los Gatos, Ca | 1.2105 | 0.04708 | 95 | 77 | 16 | 2 |
2641 | I'm sorry, but each of your 16.666 minutes are up. We'll have to continue this next week. | 1.2105 | 0.04940 | 95 | 78 | 14 | 3 |
2642 | We will focus on self confidence today...which one of you is Anna? | 1.2105 | 0.04940 | 95 | 78 | 14 | 3 |
2643 | ... on the other hand, you save on the co-pay. | 1.2105 | 0.04708 | 95 | 77 | 16 | 2 |
2644 | Groupon therapy sessions 30٪ off | 1.2105 | 0.04708 | 95 | 77 | 16 | 2 |
2645 | Next time we’ll all contemplate our bare toes, then go out for a nice group pedicure. | 1.2105 | 0.05578 | 95 | 81 | 8 | 6 |
2646 | And yes, it’s time to discuss the codependent issues in the room... | 1.2105 | 0.04205 | 95 | 75 | 20 | 0 |
2647 | Before we get started, which of you had the Groupon? | 1.2105 | 0.05161 | 95 | 79 | 12 | 4 |
2648 | Just so you know, the Groupon rate is only good for the first session. | 1.2105 | 0.04463 | 95 | 76 | 18 | 1 |
2649 | The group on current political affairs just left, so you're on climate change, right? | 1.2105 | 0.05161 | 95 | 79 | 12 | 4 |
2650 | I'd call them characters, John, but I'm not really sure they're personalities. | 1.2105 | 0.04463 | 95 | 76 | 18 | 1 |
2651 | Tell me why you asked for the group rate. | 1.2105 | 0.04205 | 95 | 75 | 20 | 0 |
2652 | You said you had a three for one coupon? | 1.2105 | 0.04708 | 95 | 77 | 16 | 2 |
2653 | Your reticence is counterproductive to our goals at summer therapy camp. | 1.2105 | 0.05161 | 95 | 79 | 12 | 4 |
2654 | Thanks for booking through our new Session Share app | 1.2105 | 0.05161 | 95 | 79 | 12 | 4 |
2655 | Tell me how you feel when your health insurance doesn't come close to covering the cost of a 1-on-1 therapy session. | 1.2105 | 0.04708 | 95 | 77 | 16 | 2 |
2656 | Fear of heights, groups and tight places all in one session. Hello B.M.W. | 1.2105 | 0.04940 | 95 | 78 | 14 | 3 |
2657 | Id, please stop interrupting down there. | 1.2100 | 0.04777 | 100 | 82 | 15 | 3 |
2658 | Welcome to the Beta test site for Medicare For All. | 1.2100 | 0.04560 | 100 | 81 | 17 | 2 |