Contest #699


Cartoon

699

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “And how do you feel about how she feels about how he feels?”
  2. “Today, we’re going to work on your codependence issues, your separation anxiety, and your fear of heights.”
  3. “Trust me. You're not alone.”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2020-03-01T22:59:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2020-03-15T22:05:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2020-03-09T22:04:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued March 16, 2020
Number of captions 5932
Number of responses 1192068
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Two of you have underlying issues. 2.2122 0.00657 12059 2127 5243 4683
1 You need help - on so many levels. 2.1045 0.00640 13248 2979 5900 4362
2 So, I gather your health plan didn't tell you what a Tier III plan is. 2.0508 0.00625 16530 4936 5812 5775
3 Linda, why do you think men are 'beneath' you? 2.0279 0.00646 14452 4163 5713 4566
4 Where shall we begin--with acrophobia, claustrophobia, or fear of being crushed? 2.0089 0.00656 13444 3830 5660 3946
5 Well, Freud never had to pay rent in Manhattan. 2.0081 0.00737 11672 3655 4267 3746
6 Patient number two, same question. 1.9964 0.00874 7805 2341 3151 2313
7 Welcome to Medicare for All at the Same Time 1.9933 0.00935 7429 2435 2609 2385
8 Don’t worry, I am certified to treat multiple personalities. 1.9628 0.00959 6535 2090 2598 1847
9 Have you considered the possibility that you are three separate people? 1.9538 0.00712 12620 4345 4507 3760
10 Okay, now let's start at the top. 1.9216 0.00778 9607 3196 3964 2445
11 I know it's our first session, but I'm going to say codependence is at least a part of your problem. 1.9192 0.00652 13601 4519 5656 3419
12 Trust me. You're not alone. 1.8879 0.00740 10778 3848 4284 2642
13 You knew when you voted for Bernie that "Medicare for all' would involve some compromises. 1.8816 0.00693 13223 5069 4650 3501
14 And how do you feel about how she feels about how he feels? 1.8459 0.00913 7341 2895 2679 1765
15 Well, time's up. Leave your groupon with my secretary. 1.8404 0.00815 9489 3866 3266 2353
16 Not only is the group discount a bargain, you’ll feel better just hearing how screwed up the others are. 1.8333 0.01079 5339 2177 1875 1287
17 Sibling rivalry, middle child syndrome, fear of falling...anything else? 1.8326 0.00713 11419 4428 4464 2517
18 Which one of you is my patient and which two of you are from AirBNB? 1.8307 0.00810 9752 4085 3230 2433
19 Now, let's explore your obsession with berth order... 1.8238 0.00791 10055 4203 3418 2431
20 Trust me, Sheila, the other two voices you keep hearing are most definitely not in your head. 1.8229 0.00843 8031 3127 3197 1705
21 Okay, time for another lightning round. Worst childhood memory. 1.8225 0.01581 2434 994 878 562
22 Then you shouldn’t have come to Costco for your counseling. 1.8203 0.00758 10997 4641 3684 2668
23 Do you prefer "he," "she" or "they?" 1.7989 0.00866 8269 3564 2799 1900
24 Everything you say to me is strictly confidential. 1.7779 0.00947 6793 2989 2322 1481
25 Remind me again, which one of you was a middle child? 1.7501 0.00738 9970 4260 3933 1771
26 You asked if I could sandwich you into my schedule this afternoon. 1.7318 0.01516 2446 1103 896 447
27 You each have issues on one level or another. 1.7293 0.00839 7759 3454 2948 1354
28 So, I may have underestimated the severity of your multiple personality disorder. 1.7214 0.00823 8362 3854 2977 1525
29 Today we’re going to work on your codependence issues, your separation anxiety, and your fear of heights. 1.7203 0.00870 7251 3285 2704 1258
30 Now calm down, it's not unusual to have a ménage à trois, what's unusual is that Timothy is pregnant. 1.7146 0.01003 6481 3297 1731 1450
31 That was no typo. I’m a licensed threeapist. 1.7124 0.01025 5758 2808 1796 1153
32 This is wrong on so many levels! 1.7106 0.00936 6708 3221 2203 1280
33 I see. I see. I see. 1.7106 0.01269 3507 1644 1234 629
34 You're lucky I could squeeze you in 1.7037 0.00977 5691 2638 2099 953
35 It's amazing how many responses you get when your ad says: "Threesomes, every hour on the hour." 1.7013 0.01883 1694 837 526 331
36 ..and what makes you feel like you've lost your identity? Number 1? 1.7009 0.01061 4978 2359 1745 871
37 we are working with so many ex-Trump staff, we have to combine the sessions 1.6983 0.02067 1475 754 412 309
38 You said you wanted group therapy. 1.6871 0.01109 4522 2185 1561 771
39 I can't tell you which, but one of these couches is a placebo. 1.6798 0.01266 3698 1878 1125 693
40 Let's start at the top. 1.6772 0.00958 5917 2888 2058 965
41 It's an idea I had while flying coach. 1.6765 0.01541 2300 1120 804 376
42 I'm sorry. Our 16 2/3 minutes are up. 1.6727 0.05203 220 113 66 41
43 Your id, ego, and superego are very well defined 1.6694 0.00981 5893 2965 1903 1019
44 How does it make you feel that I can only validate one parking ticket? 1.6612 0.01474 2642 1357 823 462
45 So, how are we? 1.6598 0.01736 1784 886 619 279
46 Good night, Id. Good night, Ego. Good night, Superego. 1.6533 0.01555 2299 1175 746 378
47 What did you think universal healthcare was going to look like?... 1.6524 0.01028 5340 2756 1681 900
48 I see you brought all your personalities today. 1.6492 0.00955 5784 2894 2023 866
49 And why don't you feel special? 1.6463 0.01155 4023 2043 1359 620
50 By working this way, we find that two out of three patients leave feeling like their problems aren't quite so bad after all... 1.6456 0.02182 1078 535 390 153
51 You each have a third of my undivided attention. 1.6418 0.01864 1569 809 513 247
52 I should have been more specific on the 3-for-1 Groupon... 1.6411 0.01034 5143 2668 1651 823
53 Debbie got the top bunk because she has better insurance, Doug, not because her parents love her more. 1.6282 0.01197 3722 1959 1192 567
54 Nothing has changed. The one with the highest co-pay gets the top bunk. 1.6247 0.01383 2755 1437 915 403
55 Welcome to Groupon therapy 1.6226 0.01037 5111 2733 1572 805
56 We'll start at the top with 'fear of heights,' move on to 'claustrophobia,' then end with 'everyone looks down on me.' 1.6199 0.01224 3565 1886 1148 531
57 Is 'they' your preferred pronoun? 1.6189 0.01100 4492 2401 1400 690
58 You have my undivided attention. 1.6185 0.01213 3539 1852 1181 504
59 The technical term is aestrascastraphobia, or fear of summer camp." 1.6185 0.01168 4031 2169 1225 630
60 The first thing I want you to know is that you're not alone. 1.6157 0.01674 1712 866 638 208
61 Yes, it is possible that you are tripolar. 1.6014 0.01363 2835 1537 891 407
62 You can't just say 'ditto.' 1.5940 0.01541 2192 1196 690 306
63 …and Janice, please stop saying “I see monsters under my bed.” 1.5903 0.01332 3080 1728 880 469
64 And what do you think triggers these memories of summer camp? 1.5848 0.01293 3056 1687 951 413
65 It's the difference between $100 an hour and $300 an hour. And as a bonus, you get to make new friends. 1.5823 0.01338 2866 1583 897 386
66 I am better at treating one person with multiple personalities than three people with no personality. 1.5803 0.01548 2290 1308 631 349
67 We'll now begin our first session of trickle-down psychiatry. 1.5769 0.01396 2640 1473 809 357
68 I thought I'd begin this session with a few words about berth order. 1.5752 0.01442 2573 1467 732 374
69 I’m reminding you that you spent the entire last session arguing over who goes first. 1.5718 0.01430 2506 1407 763 335
70 Sorry- your multiple personalities will have to pay separately. 1.5698 0.01441 2557 1463 725 365
71 But psychotherapy has never been debunked. 1.5687 0.01485 2432 1403 675 354
72 Yes, of course. It is disturbing on many levels. 1.5641 0.01553 2106 1193 636 276
73 It's just a workaround... insurance pays one third of my rate 1.5618 0.01516 2218 1264 662 292
74 You're suffering from, respectively, low, medium, and high shelf esteem. 1.5613 0.01596 2054 1185 585 284
75 I treat for multiple personality disorder but bill each personality separately. 1.5607 0.01584 2092 1210 591 291
76 This is what I call trickle down psychiatry 1.5597 0.02039 1215 692 366 157
77 Today, group, I'd like each of you to tell me why you think psychotherapy is a lot of bunk. 1.5596 0.05388 193 115 48 30
78 You do understand that the closer we get to the November election, the more crowded these sessions are going to become, right? 1.5586 0.02501 802 456 244 102
79 Ok, boys. Just describe your feelings when a girl is on top. 1.5580 0.02108 1156 665 337 154
80 This week we're going to try something called "trickle-down" therapy. 1.5573 0.01612 2015 1171 565 279
81 No need to be ashamed; patients often tier up during group sessions. 1.5560 0.01606 2043 1193 564 286
82 Thank you for sharing. 1.5556 0.01723 1719 990 503 226
83 Patient number one, tell me why you don't feel special. 1.5491 0.01651 1821 1047 548 226
84 Stop changing places. 3 card monte always snookers me. 1.5468 0.01934 1730 1137 241 349
85 Yes I’m sorry, cutbacks in insurance coverage. And please don’t listen when it’s not your turn. 1.5445 0.01767 1642 980 437 222
86 Multiple personality #1, this question is for you. 1.5440 0.01697 1669 955 520 194
87 Have you considered that it might not be multiple personality disorder? 1.5424 0.01745 1641 966 462 208
88 And what did you think I meant by a "three for one" session? 1.5402 0.01728 1568 893 503 172
89 Next time splurge for better insurance. By the way, Bottom Bunk - your 15 minutes are up. 1.5390 0.01859 1527 917 397 213
90 I suspect multiple personality disorders. 1.5369 0.01906 1503 919 361 223
91 Until you’re off your parents’ insurance, this is how it works. 1.5361 0.01839 1425 827 432 166
92 Because I still have student bills to pay off, that’s why. 1.5338 0.01886 1437 852 390 188
93 Really? NONE of you blames your mother? 1.5332 0.02142 1039 603 318 118
94 What did you think three-for-one deal meant? 1.5326 0.01902 1397 831 386 179
95 And you all still feel lonely? 1.5314 0.01911 1370 814 384 172
96 Why do you feel like the odds are stacked against you? 1.5314 0.01966 1387 849 339 199
97 If he had my overhead, Freud would have done the same thing! 1.5313 0.01901 1372 812 390 169
98 OK, Ego. First we'll hear from you. Then Id. Then Superego. 1.5301 0.01889 1345 787 403 155
99 The only way to get to the bottom of this, is to start from the top. Often the truth lies somewhere in the middle. 1.5301 0.01874 1362 796 410 156
100 Well,what did you think group therapy would be like? 1.5298 0.01956 1342 808 357 177
101 This is Manhattan. Get over it. 1.5294 0.02237 935 542 291 102
102 Ok. We've decided who gets the top bunk. That's a good start. I'll see you next week. 1.5270 0.01951 1296 771 367 158
103 Sorry about the set up here but it really does pay to read your insurance fine print 1.5265 0.01945 1263 742 377 144
104 Group therapy isn’t for everyone 1.5264 0.01995 1290 780 339 170
105 One check or separate checks? 1.5249 0.01995 1223 726 352 145
106 No, I can't give you separate checks. You'll have to work it out yourselves. 1.5249 0.01983 1244 740 355 149
107 I heard you the third time... 1.5225 0.02175 1133 703 268 162
108 That's all our time today, that's all our time today, and that's all our time today. 1.5203 0.02065 1182 717 315 150
109 Welcome to your Groupon therapy session. 1.5190 0.02086 1158 710 297 149
110 We can begin when everyone places their hands on their stomach" 1.5189 0.02211 1085 674 259 152
111 Okay, let’s take it from the top ... 1.5183 0.02075 1150 695 314 141
112 Which personality is speaking now? 1.5168 0.02158 1130 702 272 156
113 So you slept your way to the top? 1.5157 0.02341 954 592 232 130
114 Groupon psychiatry 1.5154 0.02255 1102 705 225 171
115 I know you might get the impression that psychiatry is a lot of bunk ... 1.5135 0.02127 1075 649 298 127
116 I see you chose to put yourself above everyone else. Interesting. 1.5122 0.02180 1062 653 274 135
117 Welcome to acrophobia, claustrophobia, and fear of being in middle-management therapy. 1.5110 0.02252 1047 659 241 147
118 How do you feel you stack up? 1.5094 0.02127 1015 604 305 106
119 This isn't what I had in mind when you said we should explore my issues with my parents 1.5090 0.05938 167 110 29 28
120 At the end of today's session, one of you will be voted off the lounger. 1.5072 0.02210 972 588 275 109
121 The hard part was cutting the umbilical cord. We're good now. 1.5066 0.02377 981 633 199 149
122 To begin, let’s start with Bob, the middle child. 1.5042 0.02228 950 576 269 105
123 Well here's hoping you're all here for the same problem 1.5041 0.02314 859 516 253 90
124 Group therapy is NOT bunk! Why does everyone keep saying that? 1.5037 0.02345 947 598 221 128
125 What did you expect when you bought a therapy session on Groupon? 1.5019 0.04216 259 156 76 27
126 I'm sorry,which one of you is afraid of heights? 1.4989 0.02437 886 565 198 122
127 An agoraphobe, an acrophobe, and a claustrophobe walk into a psychiatrist’s office… 1.4983 0.02380 877 548 221 107
128 Yes, if you are wondering I still haven't paid off my student loan. 1.4964 0.02425 695 405 235 55
129 In these sessions we'll work toward dismantling the illusion that one of you always comes out on top. 1.4953 0.02381 852 529 224 99
130 So Martha, you’ve been a bed wetter since childhood...? 1.4943 0.02866 617 391 147 79
131 OK, OK, I’m sorry if you feel therapy is just a lot of bunk. 1.4927 0.02441 824 517 208 99
132 So, tell me about these imaginary friends. 1.4925 0.02414 802 494 221 87
133 So,let us begin our Uber share therapy session. Shall we begin on top? 1.4920 0.02545 815 525 174 113
134 I got my licence from Ikea. 1.4914 0.02411 812 502 219 90
135 We should have thought of the bathroom before starting therapy today shouldn't we have! 1.4912 0.02500 798 505 194 99
136 So when did you first realize you weren't triplets? 1.4901 0.02439 808 505 210 93
137 The "Medicare for all" family plan 1.4894 0.02513 803 513 187 103
138 What makes you think you're not treated as individuals? 1.4893 0.02372 791 481 233 77
139 They have reduced our psychologists by two-thirds. 1.4878 0.02537 777 495 185 97
140 Shall we take it from the top? 1.4878 0.02430 777 479 217 81
141 Well, I'm here to help debunk those feelings. 1.4873 0.02832 552 336 163 53
142 Zoloft, Xanax, Prozac....NEXT!! 1.4869 0.02500 762 483 191 88
143 Now I understand one of you has a bedwetting problem? 1.4838 0.02590 740 473 176 91
144 Sorry for the over-booking. We're being overwhelmed by the presidential stress epidemic 1.4830 0.02617 735 473 169 93
145 The sign painter misspelled it "threepy," and I just went with it. 1.4829 0.02601 733 469 174 90
146 I understand it can be difficult being a White House Press Secretary. 1.4827 0.02781 663 430 146 87
147 I don’t think it’s dissociative identity disorder if you’re actually three separate people. 1.4817 0.02545 712 444 193 75
148 Today we can work on our collective unconscious. 1.4815 0.02769 702 465 136 101
149 How does it make you feel that I’m charging each of you the full hourly rate. 1.4813 0.02691 721 471 151 98
150 On the bright side, misery loves company. 1.4812 0.02392 719 451 201 65
151 It’s a new part of my practice called Tri-chiatry 1.4798 0.02745 717 475 136 104
152 Many say that psychotherapy is a lot of bunk 1.4785 0.02698 698 454 154 90
153 Some say my group therapy sessions are all bunk. You'll have to judge for yourself. 1.4785 0.02652 698 445 165 84
154 I’m taking group therapy to another level. 1.4775 0.02524 689 425 199 65
155 It's the latest in group counseling...the top bunk pays the highest rate and get's the last word. 1.4770 0.02688 696 452 156 88
156 You may not cry. But you may tier up. 1.4756 0.02581 677 423 186 68
157 You may feel alone, but you’re clearly not. 1.4751 0.02528 684 423 197 64
158 The buy one get two free promotion was intended for multiple visits. 1.4736 0.02440 663 423 181 57
159 This is my first literal "split personality" case. 1.4734 0.02849 657 439 125 93
160 Ok, let's begin by discussing your berth order. 1.4724 0.02704 635 403 164 68
161 Try to avoid talking down to the person beneath you. 1.4712 0.02605 643 400 183 60
162 Now that you're all comfortable, I'm afraid we're out of time. 1.4712 0.02768 643 418 147 77
163 I'm sorry, Janet, but I'm not going to bring the ladder back out until you open up some more. 1.4711 0.02840 605 392 141 72
164 Welcome, and thank you for using the Groupon for my special "Mother Issues Monday." 1.4702 0.02730 638 410 156 72
165 So, you learned you are triplets from 23 and me? 1.4701 0.02737 636 409 155 72
166 So you feel like someone is coming between you two? 1.4693 0.02590 586 353 191 42
167 And how did that make you feel? And how did that make you feel? And how did that make you feel? 1.4692 0.02811 616 400 143 73
168 What did you expect with my three-for-one promotion? 1.4691 0.02789 631 411 144 76
169 Don't all talk at once 1.4690 0.02867 629 416 127 84
170 So, the consensus is that the threesome was NOT a success. 1.4685 0.02763 619 398 152 69
171 Always remember that you are unique, just like everybody else! 1.4669 0.02667 619 389 171 59
172 Private session? I'm sorry, you're in a tiered health care plan. 1.4667 0.02659 615 390 166 59
173 To start the healing process, let’s debunk birth order. 1.4658 0.02761 599 382 155 62
174 Everybody loved Bernie's healthcare plan before the election. 1.4652 0.02823 604 393 141 70
175 Now you understand why they call it Tri-Care. 1.4652 0.02881 604 399 129 76
176 How did you think I would counsel a ménage a trois? 1.4651 0.02690 602 378 168 56
177 So it all started in summer camp? 1.4651 0.02638 602 373 178 51
178 So, Tammy, why do you always insist on being the superego? 1.4643 0.02912 616 413 118 84
179 Okay, let me get this straight, you have a fear of heights, you have claustrophobia and you’re just here for a nap. 1.4642 0.02731 586 369 162 55
180 I’m a practitioner in a form of therapy known as trickle-down. 1.4635 0.02846 589 383 139 67
181 I had a different concept in mind when I signed up for group therapy. 1.4626 0.02919 588 388 123 74
182 And, all together now, how did that make you feel? 1.4625 0.02957 586 392 117 77
183 So as you can see, we had to stack up the appointments for today. 1.4622 0.02734 582 367 161 54
184 Welcome to TrumpCare. 1.4596 0.02915 570 378 125 67
185 So, tell me how you feel about Medicare for All. 1.4592 0.02840 564 363 143 58
186 My approach is a little bit of Jung, a little bit of Freud and a whole lot of Henry Ford. 1.4581 0.02929 513 327 137 49
187 Well, you voted for him, now you'll have to deal with the Medicare cuts. 1.4580 0.02968 559 371 120 68
188 All right, we’ll start at the top and get to the bottom of this. 1.4578 0.02820 557 356 147 54
189 Correction: “You’re here today because two’s company but three’s crazy.” 1.4559 0.02984 544 360 120 64
190 Before we begin, rest assured that our session will be kept semi-private. 1.4550 0.02756 545 342 158 45
191 So to explore the effects of sibling birth order, I've stacked you by age. 1.4532 0.02954 534 350 126 58
192 So, it's acrophobia, claustrophobia, and low self-esteem. Or did I mix that up? 1.4530 0.02877 532 348 132 52
193 I charge by the patient not the hour 1.4525 0.03094 526 355 104 67
194 As a rule of thumb, I just assume one third of my patients will become well adjusted members of society. 1.4525 0.03163 526 359 92 73
195 Now, if everyone talks about their mothers at once we can both validate and normalize your behaviors simultaneously. 1.4525 0.03035 526 350 114 62
196 Let's wait for your dog to arrive. 1.4525 0.02799 526 337 142 46
197 When did you first suspect you weren't identical triplets? 1.4512 0.02947 492 314 134 44
198 The correct answer gets the session for free. 1.4511 0.03116 521 353 101 67
199 I see that this is a problem on multiple levels 1.4510 0.02860 510 323 144 43
200 Mormon couples counseling 1.4509 0.03028 519 344 116 59
201 So...you’re having trouble moving on from college dorm life. 1.4507 0.02872 517 330 141 46
202 So let's start with your mothers. 1.4507 0.03205 517 357 87 73
203 I'm afraid this is all your insurance will pay for. 1.4506 0.04337 233 150 61 22
204 Well, that's a lot of bunk. 1.4506 0.03111 506 339 106 61
205 Don't complain to me, you're the one who wanted the group rate. 1.4492 0.02851 512 335 130 47
206 Are you sure you followed the Ikea instructions? 1.4492 0.03071 512 341 110 60
207 Let’s take it from the top. 1.4492 0.02851 512 325 144 43
208 Summer camp anxiety therapy does not include calling our mommies to pick us up right now. 1.4488 0.03224 508 351 86 71
209 I know you're all different, but you're all crazy. 1.4475 0.03127 505 341 102 62
210 With this groupon, you each get 15 minutes. Let's start from the top. 1.4473 0.02914 503 323 135 45
211 It’s my trickle down theory of family happiness. 1.4465 0.03082 495 329 111 55
212 So, what brings you in today, besides the Groupon? 1.4447 0.03018 488 319 121 48
213 It’s not a multiple personality disorder when you’re different people. 1.4447 0.02919 488 312 135 41
214 So you feel like a sardines in the office, working in closed cubicles side by side. Tell me more... 1.4444 0.03191 486 330 96 60
215 Welcome to health care for all. 1.4444 0.02985 486 315 126 45
216 Which one of you thinks three's a crowd? 1.4444 0.03137 486 326 104 56
217 Thank you for participating in our double blind trial. At least one of you will be getting placebo psychology and one of you is a planted control group. 1.4442 0.03174 484 327 99 58
218 These new family sessions often end in tiers 1.4442 0.02994 484 314 125 45
219 You’re not alone in thinking that privacy is not the same as secrecy. 1.4442 0.03160 484 326 101 57
220 In this case, three is not a crowd it's a trilogy. 1.4428 0.03175 481 325 99 57
221 Will this be on one bill or separate? 1.4426 0.03115 479 319 108 52
222 As we begin Family Counseling, please try to ignore that you are my family .... 1.4423 0.03329 477 331 77 67
223 Your health insurance only covers a group session but I want you to feel special. 1.4421 0.03246 475 325 90 59
224 Multiple personality is not a disorder when you are multiple people. 1.4414 0.02924 469 298 135 36
225 Glad to see you're all adjusting to the new HMO. 1.4407 0.03191 472 319 98 55
226 One of you is the least crazy and will be leaving us this week. 1.4399 0.03089 466 307 113 46
227 Couch #2, same question. 1.4397 0.02982 473 306 126 41
228 On the phone, when you said you felt like three different people, this is not what I thought you meant. 1.4397 0.03217 464 314 96 54
229 In less than an hour, you will have two new problems. 1.4395 0.03293 471 326 83 62
230 I can assure you, psychology is not all bunk. 1.4376 0.03311 457 315 84 58
231 Take comfort in the fact that your co-pay has dropped by two-thirds! 1.4376 0.03007 457 295 124 37
232 What other people? We are here to discuss your schizophrenia. 1.4376 0.03163 457 305 104 48
233 Today, I’d like to start with a frank discussion about dependency issues. 1.4376 0.03102 457 300 111 44
234 This is how medicare for all really works. 1.4376 0.03311 457 315 84 58
235 What makes you feel they're helicopter parenting? 1.4374 0.03293 455 312 87 56
236 This new economy seating isn't perfect, but you should be grateful i'm not charging extra for your baggage. 1.4374 0.03233 455 308 95 52
237 I know it may seem a bit irregular but your company's mental health coverage just updated. Okay, so who wants to begin? 1.4374 0.03293 455 312 87 56
238 Only two more sessions and all of you will have met the deductible 1.4371 0.03229 453 306 96 51
239 Tell me about your two imaginary friends. 1.4361 0.03148 438 288 109 41
240 Imagine you are alone. Now, breathe. 1.4356 0.03319 450 309 84 56
241 I'm sorry, but your insurance only covers group therapy. 1.4347 0.03150 444 294 107 43
242 So how did it make you feel that Goldilocks liked his porridge best? 1.4347 0.03338 444 308 80 56
243 How does it make you feel that this isn't the threesome you were expecting? 1.4347 0.03245 444 300 95 49
244 Don’t worry, everything you say is confidential. 1.4347 0.03133 444 293 109 42
245 On the plus side, this format is fully covered by your company's mental health group benefit. 1.4340 0.03118 447 295 110 42
246 Anyone have a dream this week that wasn't about a sandwich? 1.4325 0.03168 437 290 105 42
247 Margaret is in the lead with three breakthroughs. 1.4324 0.03425 407 278 82 47
248 So, on a scale of one to ten, how intrusive would you say your parents are? 1.4312 0.03343 429 294 85 50
249 You're not schizophrenic. You are three people. 1.4306 0.03162 425 280 107 38
250 You are not alone. 1.4286 0.03152 420 274 105 37
251 So, tell me about your separation anxiety. 1.4286 0.03188 420 278 104 38
252 Ok, everybody. Let's take it from the top. 1.4286 0.03293 420 284 92 44
253 Why don't we have whoever is the most depressed start first? 1.4286 0.03328 420 286 88 46
254 I'm the oldest so I get to be the mom/therapist. 1.4286 0.03395 420 290 80 50
255 Actually, the effectiveness of group therapy hasn't been debunked. 1.4286 0.03428 420 289 75 51
256 Further evidence Freud was bunk. 1.4286 0.03543 420 299 62 59
257 We’ll have to do it this way in order for your insurance to cover it. 1.4282 0.03234 418 279 98 40
258 I'm testing the theory that bad things always happen in threes. 1.4275 0.03204 407 268 104 35
259 Oh, I see what you mean about 'berth trauma.' 1.4272 0.03339 412 279 88 44
260 The point is that you are not so special after all. 1.4272 0.03120 412 268 112 32
261 See Jackie? I told you last session I'd help you get over your exes. 1.4272 0.03176 412 271 106 35
262 Welcome to speed therapy. 1.4272 0.03139 412 269 110 33
263 Have you all signed the confidentiality agreement? 1.4272 0.03024 412 263 122 27
264 So... why don't we start from the top? 1.4268 0.03147 396 256 111 29
265 What makes you think you're co-dependent? 1.4268 0.03266 396 262 99 35
266 I see our 20 minutes is over. 1.4263 0.03147 434 289 105 40
267 So, how does it feel to be female, fat or young? 1.4258 0.03449 411 286 75 50
268 Okay, now let's peel back the layers of what you're feeling. 1.4254 0.03564 409 291 62 56
269 Well, what did you all think 'group practice' meant? 1.4254 0.03192 409 270 104 35
270 I'm pretty sure you have multiple personalities. 1.4254 0.03479 409 285 72 51
271 I see you've brought your alter-egos. 1.4254 0.03192 409 270 104 35
272 You all belong to the worst HMO I've ever seen. 1.4254 0.03269 402 268 97 37
273 This can easily be debunked 1.4251 0.03350 407 277 87 43
274 Ellen, 'sometimes' is too subjective. It's 'yes' or 'no'. Let's try again. Do you like being on top? 1.4251 0.03259 407 272 97 38
275 Tell me more about these two other voices you hear in your head. 1.4251 0.03087 407 263 115 29
276 Alice, can you see how sleeping on the top bunk with Irritable Bowel might upset Tim and Bobby? 1.4251 0.03350 407 277 87 43
277 Life's about getting to the top bunk, without a ladder. 1.4250 0.03538 400 281 68 51
278 Sorry for the overbooking. You can start by introducing yourselves to each other. 1.4243 0.03429 403 278 79 46
279 I think I am hearing voices. Is it just me or do you hear them too? 1.4236 0.03435 399 275 79 45
280 Let me get this straight - you have a fear of being in the middle and the bottom; you have a fear of being on top and on the bottom; you have a fear of being on top and the middle. Is that about right? 1.4236 0.03544 399 280 67 51
281 Your HMO covers 15 minutes of group therapy. 1.4236 0.03435 399 275 79 45
282 To qualify for the family discount you must speak in unison. 1.4236 0.03399 399 273 83 43
283 How does that make us feel? 1.4235 0.03308 392 264 91 37
284 On the bright side, you get to split the co-pay three ways. 1.4235 0.03588 307 200 84 23
285 Maybe we shouldn't have gotten our therapist from Costco. Fred Trenk, Towaco, New Jersey 1.4213 0.03485 394 274 74 46
286 I hear you, Megan, but it is simply not the case that student loans are bad for everyone. 1.4209 0.03517 392 274 71 47
287 I'm sorry, I thought it was clear when I said you were bunked for one session. 1.4209 0.03498 392 273 73 46
288 In these situations, I find it helpful to start a the bottom and work my way up. 1.4209 0.03082 392 252 115 25
289 You’re not alone. You’re all bedwetters. 1.4209 0.03517 392 274 71 47
290 Let’s focus today’s session on codependency. 1.4205 0.03217 390 266 90 34
291 Next session we will see how you cope when the cots are stacked against you. 1.4205 0.03473 390 270 76 44
292 Let's see we have fear of heights, middle child issues and feeling down, right ? 1.4205 0.03217 390 259 98 32
293 Which personality has health insurance? 1.4205 0.03217 390 257 102 31
294 Tell me more about why you think camp scarred you for life. 1.4197 0.03219 386 254 102 30
295 We have just enough time left for a lightning round. 1.4192 0.03347 365 242 93 30
296 You all have problems on different levels. 1.4184 0.03296 380 253 95 32
297 Look, as far as I'm concerned, you're all Mark, okay? 1.4178 0.03440 383 263 80 40
298 OK, Boomer. GenX and Millenial say you're up first. 1.4178 0.03420 383 262 82 39
299 And you'll get and even bigger discount if you all have the same phobia. 1.4178 0.03298 383 256 94 33
300 Group therapy is easier when you don’t see eye to eye 1.4171 0.03420 398 276 78 43
301 Your problems are layered 1.4169 0.03259 379 251 98 30
302 If you are afraid of heights, try arriving on time next week. 1.4169 0.03446 379 260 80 39
303 I can see we're dealing with multiple issues here. 1.4169 0.03280 379 251 96 31
304 Let's work on your obsessive desire for undivided attention. 1.4169 0.03280 379 252 96 31
305 Well, you voted for health care for all.” 1.4167 0.03588 384 272 64 48
306 Each of you has my full attention. 1.4164 0.03335 377 253 91 33
307 Your insurance provider requires you all to agree on a neurosis. 1.4160 0.03304 375 250 94 31
308 So, who first suggested couples therapy? 1.4160 0.03652 375 267 60 48
309 So, fear of heights, claustrophobic, and low self esteem. Who wants to start? 1.4160 0.03326 375 251 92 32
310 The father of psychoanalysis. Please phrase your response in the form of a question. 1.4160 0.03533 375 261 72 42
311 When did you start believing you have multiple personalities? 1.4155 0.03547 373 260 71 42
312 So, she wanted another man in bed and this is what you thought she meant? 1.4151 0.03478 371 255 78 38
313 If you think it's crowded now, imagine if he's reëlected. 1.4151 0.03478 371 255 78 38
314 Answer "yes" with thumbs up, "no" with thumbs down. 1.4151 0.03602 371 261 66 44
315 One of you is real. Two are figments. Wanna vote 1.4146 0.03596 369 259 67 43
316 I want to understand why you all think therapy is bunk. 1.4146 0.03513 369 255 75 39
317 This will go smoother if you all have the same issue. 1.4146 0.03319 369 246 93 30
318 I think there was a misunderstanding when we discussed third-party payment. 1.4146 0.03636 369 260 63 45
319 I'm not loving this Medicare for All. 1.4146 0.03274 369 244 97 28
320 Yes, dissociative identity disorder is not that uncommon, but it is rare to have such fully developed multiple personalities. 1.4146 0.03428 369 251 83 35
321 Now Jerome, tell me more about these two imaginary friends that follow you everywhere and copy everything you do. 1.4142 0.03397 367 248 86 33
322 Again, who here said my ideas are bunk? 1.4142 0.03651 367 260 62 45
323 This is how your HMO can offer a reduced "group" rate. 1.4141 0.03510 384 268 71 44
324 Billy, I when I said “try therapy”, I did not mean “tri-therapy”. 1.4141 0.03269 384 259 92 32
325 I didn't think anybody would be interested in this Groupon deal... 1.4140 0.03386 372 252 86 34
326 When did you first suspect you're not identical triplets? 1.4137 0.03252 365 240 99 26
327 So how's that menage-a-trois going? 1.4137 0.03583 365 255 69 41
328 Sorry. My appointments have really been stacking up this week. 1.4137 0.03252 365 240 99 26
329 This isn't what the 3 for 1 voucher meant ...but seen as you've gone to such trouble.. 1.4130 0.03368 368 248 88 32
330 The other two of you pretend you didn’t hear that. 1.4121 0.03674 313 212 73 28
331 Remember your ids, egos, and superergos are your three dimensional chess pieces. 1.4116 0.03517 362 250 75 37
332 William, you are high-get off the drugs. Dan, you are suffering from middle child syndrome. Dave, you have low esteem. Now I will need to make a copy of all of your insurance cards and collect your copayments before we start treatment.” 1.4115 0.03678 384 279 52 53
333 If you ask me, it's a lot of bunk 1.4115 0.03469 384 268 74 42
334 I want the adults here to consider who suffers the most if it all falls apart. 1.4111 0.03639 360 254 62 42
335 I still think you misread the groupon... 1.4111 0.03281 360 238 96 26
336 So I'm guessing... separation anxiety? 1.4111 0.03161 360 236 96 22
337 Sorry. . . But what did you expect for $45 an hour. 1.4111 0.03618 360 252 65 41
338 Sanders calls it "Medicare for All" 1.4111 0.03397 360 243 86 31
339 With our new three tear health care system the top tear can cry for 5 minutes, the middle tear for 3 minutes and the bottom tear for 1 minute. 1.4111 0.03805 360 262 48 50
340 Next week, Id rotates to Ego, and Ego rotates to Superego. 1.4110 0.05640 146 102 28 16
341 ...and my Ph.D. thesis was on The Role of IKEA in Family Dynamics. 1.4108 0.03265 370 246 96 28
342 So” How long have you all, Been sleeping together 1.4108 0.03586 370 261 66 43
343 Tell me about that day at summer camp. 1.4108 0.03545 370 259 70 41
344 Are you experiencing feelings of anxiety that life is just stacked against you? 1.4106 0.03718 358 256 57 45
345 I’m just practicing for Medicare for All 1.4106 0.03654 358 253 63 42
346 Thruples Therapy 1.4106 0.03739 358 256 55 46
347 Blame, President Sanders! 1.4106 0.03675 358 254 61 43
348 I'm sure when you voted for Medicare for All, you weren't exactly expecting stacked counseling sessions, did you. 1.4106 0.03654 358 253 63 42
349 Good morning, Ego, Id and Super-Ego!!!! 1.4106 0.03760 358 257 53 47
350 The first one to answer gets 10 points 1.4106 0.03654 358 253 63 42
351 So why do you feel that you and your friends can’t move beyond your college days? 1.4106 0.03246 358 235 99 24
352 What brings you in to thruples therapy? 1.4101 0.03647 356 251 64 41
353 Trump's "three for the price of one" healthcare plan at work. 1.4086 0.03715 350 249 59 42
354 Great work, Jane. You've mastered the corporate ladder. 1.4086 0.03603 350 244 69 37
355 I'd say all three of you are compartmentalizing. 1.4086 0.03319 350 232 93 25
356 Sorry, I've forgotten which one of you is suffering from multiple personality disorder. 1.4086 0.03737 350 250 57 43
357 Was it Jane or Bob who said they felt unheard? 1.4080 0.03332 348 231 92 25
358 Okay, let’s take a tiered approach. 1.4079 0.03225 353 231 100 22
359 It's fine. The other two are just Airbnbers. 1.4075 0.03539 319 214 80 25
360 I’ll need your 3-fer coupon before we start our session. 1.4075 0.03345 346 230 91 25
361 I'm not sure which of you asked that but I want you to know I'm here for you. 1.4075 0.03370 346 231 89 26
362 If you think Medicare for All psychology is strange, wait until you see the new Medicare for All triple bypass surgery. 1.4070 0.03530 344 236 76 32
363 Thanks for answering my questions. I've chosen Mr.Jacobs to be the new receptionist" 1.4065 0.03401 369 253 82 34
364 Contestant Number Two, how would you describe your mother in just one word, and why? 1.4063 0.03436 347 235 83 29
365 There’s a reason that we call it “tiered pricing.” 1.4059 0.03384 340 226 88 25
366 Who wants to go first. 1.4052 0.03678 343 241 63 38
367 So how have your parents' IKEA habits effected your growth? 1.4052 0.03438 343 232 83 28
368 Don’t worry. You’re not alone. 1.4052 0.03363 343 229 89 25
369 I told you this would happen when you voted to end Obama Care! 1.4052 0.03338 343 233 81 27
370 Before we begin, I'd just like to say that this is the most convincing case of multiple personality disorder I've ever seen. 1.4052 0.03286 343 226 95 22
371 For the next question on our marketing survey, please indicate whether your bed is a) too hard; b) too soft; or c) just right. 1.4047 0.03550 341 235 74 32
372 Well, what were you expecting from group therapy? 1.4047 0.03452 341 231 82 28
373 ohhhh, so when an airlines treats you like this, it's OK? 1.4047 0.03575 341 236 72 33
374 Before we get started, will this be on separate checks? 1.4047 0.03402 341 229 86 26
375 You are the three finalists of this week’s cartoon contest 1.4047 0.03599 341 237 70 34
376 How does it feel having a woman and a black man above you? 1.4041 0.03516 339 232 77 30
377 So, how is your first quarantine week going? 1.4041 0.03779 339 243 55 41
378 Tell me about the trauma you experienced at summer camp 1.4041 0.03590 339 235 71 33
379 We could all be a little more supportive about Cindy’s bed wetting. 1.4041 0.03565 339 234 73 32
380 It’s new, I like to call it collective conscience therapy! 1.4041 0.03825 339 245 51 43
381 It’s not your fault. It’s not your fault. It’s not your fault. 1.4040 0.03409 354 241 83 30
382 You'll each have 90 seconds to answer, and then an additional 60 seconds for rebuttal. 1.4036 0.03377 337 225 88 24
383 What make you say that you never get enough personal attention? 1.4036 0.03653 337 236 66 35
384 Is anyone a happy camper yet? 1.4030 0.03693 335 235 63 36
385 Please stop referring to this method as a "pyramid schema." 1.4030 0.03283 335 221 92 21
386 What did you Bernie voters think would happen under "Medicare for All?" 1.4030 0.03416 335 225 85 25
387 When did you first realise you had multiple personalities? 1.4030 0.03468 335 227 81 27
388 Psychiatry’s not an exact science, so I have decided to use “Millennial Group Therapy.” 1.4018 0.03870 331 240 49 42
389 Just remember...you’re special 1.4012 0.03549 324 221 76 27
390 And, so, if I understand you correctly, you all have the same Jewish mother. 1.4000 0.03620 325 225 70 30
391 Ok, ...let’s start from the top. 1.4000 0.03567 325 222 74 28
392 Robert, I'm sorry, our eighteen minutes and thirty three seconds are up. 1.4000 0.03261 325 212 96 17
393 So, when did you decide it would be cheaper if you all came at once? 1.4000 0.03849 325 233 52 39
394 That's not how I imagined group therapy 1.4000 0.03922 325 236 46 42
395 I just want to remind you that the Groupon is only good for your first session. 1.4000 0.03348 325 227 73 24
396 Okay. Let me know when you start hearing those voices again ... 1.4000 0.03517 335 230 76 29
397 Now, let's see if we can debunk those feelings 1.4000 0.03594 325 224 72 29
398 Surely you didn't think 'three-for-one' meant individual sessions. 1.4000 0.03514 325 221 78 26
399 So, how long have you been experiencing multiple personalities? 1.4000 0.03818 320 228 56 36
400 I like to hear separately from the superego, ego, and id during sessions 1.3994 0.03446 323 217 83 23
401 In order to comply with HIPAA, I will refer to you as top, middle and bottom. 1.3994 0.03303 323 215 86 20
402 Now Karen, you know Martha called top bunk. 1.3994 0.03965 323 237 43 43
403 I'm glad you called, summer camp trauma is my specialty. 1.3994 0.03582 323 222 73 28
404 Client number two. Same question. If I chose to proceed with a Freudian Oedipal-Complex modality, how turned on would you be to make a long-term therapy commitment? 1.3988 0.04032 321 238 38 45
405 Now what makes you think you don't have my undivided attention? 1.3988 0.03374 321 213 88 20
406 Can you describe this feeling of being in a cartoon? 1.3988 0.03808 321 229 56 36
407 So, you both are in love with Elizabeth, but Elizabeth is in love with her cat. 1.3987 0.03680 311 215 68 28
408 Well, what did you expect when you use a Groupon? 1.3970 0.03540 335 232 73 30
409 When did you start feeling no one gave you undivided attention? 1.3969 0.03577 320 220 73 27
410 Now, tell me about your fear of intimacy. 1.3969 0.02979 320 219 84 14
411 Which one of you wants the gel pedicure that comes with this week's therapy-for-three Groupon? 1.3962 0.03858 318 229 52 37
412 It just feels wrong on so many levels. 1.3962 0.03592 318 219 72 27
413 I was able to sandwich you in before my 4 o'clock. 1.3959 0.03683 293 200 70 23
414 This is all your insurance company will pay for 1.3956 0.03552 316 216 75 25
415 Now who’s idea was this therapy sharing thing ... 1.3956 0.03876 316 228 51 37
416 Yours is a uniquely common problem, I'm afraid. 1.3956 0.03928 316 230 47 39
417 Welcome to Affordable Care meets Airbnb. 1.3956 0.03495 316 214 79 23
418 The terms of this discounted therapy session were clearly delineated in your Groupon receipts. 1.3949 0.03841 314 225 54 35
419 We just feel that our anxiety levels have elevated. 1.3949 0.04023 314 232 40 42
420 I don't know how you got there either, because Schwartz can't draw ladders. 1.3949 0.03868 314 226 52 36
421 The triplets meet for their weekly therapy session. 1.3942 0.03965 312 228 45 39
422 I anly have an hour. Which one of you is the most suicidal? 1.3942 0.03751 312 220 61 31
423 You don’t need to bring each of your personalities to our sessions! 1.3942 0.03611 312 215 71 26
424 I make more, you pay less, and you can compare your misery to the other two losers. 1.3935 0.03569 310 212 74 24
425 Yes, well, your problems will become more similar over time. 1.3935 0.03712 310 215 64 29
426 In this session, we'll confront your "hostel-ity 1.3935 0.03823 310 221 56 33
427 Welcome to the bunk bed phobia support group. 1.3935 0.03823 310 221 56 33
428 Might not have been such a great idea to include your mother in the family therapy 1.3935 0.03957 310 226 46 38
429 My theories may be unconventional, but they are not debunked. 1.3935 0.03627 310 214 70 26
430 Remind me, which of you is the chronic bedwetter? 1.3935 0.03684 310 216 66 28
431 HIPPA says you can't listen to the other persons answers during individual group therapy. 1.3935 0.03850 310 222 54 34
432 Did you like being an oarsman on the Athenian trireame? 1.3922 0.04022 306 225 42 39
433 No, Shirley, I don't think all therapy is bunk." (credit to son Julian Wise 1.3922 0.03540 306 208 76 22
434 So, what do you hope to accomplish in throuples counseling? 1.3916 0.03965 309 226 45 38
435 My fee is higher for multiple personality disorder. 1.3914 0.03960 304 220 47 36
436 ...And you just now found out he isn’t your biological son... 1.3914 0.03960 304 221 47 36
437 Today, we will learn about setting healthy boundaries. 1.3907 0.03445 302 202 82 18
438 My id didn't want to come today but super-ego said we all had to." 1.3900 0.03739 300 210 63 27
439 Just pick the richest one and have the other as the best man 1.3900 0.03648 300 207 69 24
440 I think that you might be tripolar. 1.3900 0.03739 300 210 63 27
441 My specialization is Multiple Person Disorder. 1.3900 0.03827 300 213 57 30
442 Does anyone have a less boring dream? 1.3900 0.03678 300 208 67 25
443 Describe your genitals. 1.3900 0.04135 300 222 35 41
444 The hourly rate applies to all of your personalities. 1.3893 0.03989 298 217 46 35
445 Of course this is confidential. 1.3893 0.03507 298 201 78 19
446 In 'Speed Analysis' you each have 30 seconds, then I decide ... two of you will be leaving, no charge ! 1.3893 0.03571 298 203 74 21
447 You do realize that a ménage à trois doesn't have to be this difficult. 1.3893 0.04017 298 217 44 35
448 This will only work if all of you have the exact same dream. 1.3893 0.03903 298 214 52 32
449 You are messed up on so many levels! 1.3891 0.03580 293 199 74 20
450 Yes, you could get coronavirus. 1.3887 0.04069 301 223 39 39
451 Here's yet another psychological theory that has never been debunked. 1.3887 0.03699 301 210 65 26
452 And you say they’re on top of you right now?! 1.3885 0.03862 314 228 50 36
453 I couldn't fit a sectional through the door. 1.3878 0.03941 294 212 50 32
454 It’s normal - many of my patients break into tiers. 1.3878 0.03821 294 208 58 28
455 It is often beneficial to have all your alter egos at the same session. In your case, the three dome is highly therapeutic. 1.3878 0.04142 294 219 36 39
456 I would worry less about who's higher up and more about how they're going to get down. 1.3878 0.03666 294 203 68 23
457 At this rate, I’ll pay off my student loans in 3030. 1.3878 0.03821 294 208 58 28
458 So, Gretchen, let’s start with your fear of heights. 1.3878 0.03369 294 194 86 14
459 I take doctor-patient-patient-patient confidentiality very seriously. 1.3876 0.03908 258 178 60 20
460 My analysis suggests you are suffering from trizophrenia”. 1.3862 0.04098 290 214 40 36
461 Tell me more about your Groupon regret. 1.3862 0.04039 290 212 44 34
462 I want you all to level with me ... 1.3854 0.03685 288 199 67 22
463 This is not the first time I’ve counseled love triangles. 1.3854 0.03717 288 199 65 23
464 As you might have guessed, I've treated love triangles before. 1.3854 0.03585 288 196 73 19
465 The University will no longer allow our students to "fall through the cracks." Each of you has been diagnosed with underachievement syndrome. 1.3854 0.04177 288 215 35 38
466 You are all special. Just not unique. 1.3854 0.03685 288 199 67 22
467 This week, we're going to try Freud's lesser known technique: Bunk-Bed Psychoanalysis. 1.3854 0.04206 288 216 33 39
468 Why did you choose the top bunk if you’re afraid of heights? 1.3854 0.04089 288 212 41 35
469 I realize you prefer psychoanalysis, but cognitive behavioral therapy in chairs would free up space. 1.3854 0.04089 288 212 41 35
470 Mother blames father for not spending enough time at home, father blames mother because he's not getting enough, and son ends up hating them both. So we have a dysfunctional family unit. Are all of you cool with that 1.3854 0.04000 288 209 47 32
471 OK, now change places 1.3854 0.03969 288 208 49 31
472 I assure you, I feel just as bad as you do about the cut in admissions to clinical psychology. 1.3846 0.04110 286 211 40 35
473 Your insurance company has capped the number of appointments it covers, but not the number of patients. 1.3846 0.03567 286 194 74 18
474 The point is it’s not how others see you, it’s how you see yourself”. 1.3846 0.04110 286 210 40 35
475 Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh 1.3844 0.03663 294 204 67 23
476 I'm happy you've decided to take advantage of my 3 for 1 groupon deal. 1.3844 0.03694 294 205 65 24
477 Anyone can do couples therapy 1.3841 0.03575 289 197 73 19
478 Please, one at a time! This is not the democratic presidential debate. 1.3825 0.03871 285 203 55 27
479 The Groupon is only for the first session. 1.3825 0.03742 285 199 63 23
480 When did you first suspect the triplets thing was a hoax and that she's not your birth mothers? 1.3818 0.04104 275 201 43 31
481 What did you expect for $50 an hour? 1.3816 0.03922 283 202 52 28
482 I call it "Groupon Therapy." 1.3816 0.03759 283 198 62 23
483 I charge by the personality 1.3816 0.03692 283 196 66 21
484 We've been in tiers ever since coming to your office 1.3813 0.03738 278 193 64 21
485 So let me get this straight... you are each a figment of the others' imagination? 1.3808 0.03777 281 196 60 23
486 That's just how it is with insurance these days - and your problems are all basically the same anyway. 1.3808 0.03709 281 195 65 21
487 And as for you Mrs. Smith don’t for a minute think you’re above all this ! 1.3808 0.04192 281 210 34 36
488 When did your personal space and privacy issues begin? 1.3808 0.03605 281 192 71 18
489 From top to Bottom, #1,#2,#3. You are all free to contribute to the conversation if inclined. 1.3808 0.04131 281 207 39 34
490 So, what exactly did D'Artagnan do this time? 1.3808 0.04100 281 207 41 33
491 You all experienced a trauma involving a duck and an apricot. So this just seems easier. 1.3804 0.04026 276 200 47 29
492 Until we have Medicare for All, this is the way it’s gonna be! 1.3803 0.03648 284 196 68 20
493 So tell me, what makes you believe, that one of you is adopted? 1.3799 0.03622 279 191 70 18
494 Let's start with the fact that you're all obviously lying." 1.3799 0.03896 279 199 54 26
495 With this President, we just can no longer keep up. 1.3799 0.04026 279 203 46 30
496 And how do you feel your bed wetting has effected the people around you? 1.3799 0.03829 279 197 58 24
497 We're calling it 'threeapy'. 1.3799 0.03692 279 193 66 20
498 Okay, now let me get this straight. It's Id, Ego, and Super-ego. Which of you is which? 1.3799 0.04121 279 206 40 33
499 This is what happens in a love triangle... 1.3799 0.03761 279 195 62 22
500 I have treated people with multiple personalities before, but this is a first for me: Treating three people who share a single personality. 1.3799 0.03829 279 197 58 24
501 There's really nothing to this "middle child sydrome." 1.3799 0.04152 279 205 38 34
502 At least two of you are delusional. 1.3796 0.05687 137 99 24 14
503 I'm sorry for the overbooking but Trump Derangement Syndrome is reaching epidemic proportions! 1.3791 0.03949 277 199 51 27
504 Fine, I guess I should have gone into more detail about the kind of three-way I had in mind. 1.3791 0.03779 277 194 61 22
505 Do you all have a buzzer? 1.3791 0.04111 277 204 41 32
506 You all seem to be suffering from single personality disorder. 1.3791 0.04079 277 203 43 31
507 Well Harry, I see you've brought all of your personalities with you today. 1.3791 0.03848 277 196 57 24
508 Will this be on one or separate checks? 1.3791 0.03982 277 200 49 28
509 It's down to you three finalists. Now let's see who has the most interesting relationship with their mother. 1.3791 0.03674 277 191 67 19
510 First off, thank you for taking advantage of my Groupon offer. 1.3791 0.03915 277 198 53 26
511 Let’s take it from the top so we can get to the bottom of this. 1.3782 0.03655 275 189 68 18
512 And how did that make you, you, and you feel? 1.3782 0.03798 275 193 60 22
513 Now how does that make you, you, and you feel? 1.3782 0.03867 275 195 56 24
514 I feel like I'm competing for your attention. 1.3782 0.04132 275 203 40 32
515 Do you ever have feelings of loneliness? 1.3782 0.04228 275 206 34 35
516 You clearly have multiple personalities. 1.3782 0.04196 275 205 36 34
517 My practice is vertically integrated. 1.3782 0.04002 275 199 48 28
518 the university said it was a free counseling session, not private. 1.3782 0.03655 275 189 68 18
519 After a couple sessions, most people are completely comfortable with group therapy. 1.3782 0.04002 275 199 48 28
520 Thank you all for trying out my ‘TherapyPool’ session 1.3782 0.04164 275 204 38 33
521 Today let's begin with the issue of why Linda always gets the top bunk. 1.3782 0.03619 275 188 70 17
522 So who is writing the check this week? 1.3782 0.04164 275 204 38 33
523 Tell me about your struggles to fit in. 1.3782 0.04164 275 204 38 33
524 Complete this sentence: My mother ... 1.3782 0.04164 275 203 38 33
525 The middle berth is giving birth for the other berths? 1.3782 0.04259 275 207 32 36
526 Did you say "polyhumorous"? 1.3782 0.04068 275 201 44 30
527 Volume discount? Yes. 1.3773 0.03635 273 187 69 17
528 This new group therapy model takes the shared economy to new heights. 1.3773 0.04218 273 204 35 34
529 It’s all your mother’s fault. 1.3773 0.03816 273 192 59 22
530 Thank you for sharing that, Sarah. Now, let’s hear what your other personalities want to say about your mother. 1.3773 0.03886 273 194 55 23
531 Welcome to 2020 couples therapy. They, you can start. 1.3769 0.03829 268 188 59 21
532 Welcome to Medicare for all!! 1.3764 0.03906 271 193 54 24
533 This is the only therapy your insurance covers- top bunk you’re first. 1.3764 0.04077 271 197 44 29
534 I'm hungry for a bacon. lettuce and tomato sandwich. 1.3764 0.04241 271 203 34 34
535 OK Who farted? 1.3764 0.04110 271 199 42 30
536 Congrats on signing up for Counseling with The Costco App. 1.3764 0.03690 271 187 66 18
537 I’m happy we have last weeks finalists all together. A recount of the votes shouldn’t take too much longer. 1.3764 0.04209 271 202 36 33
538 Don't be embarrassed, I am seeing more and more cases of Tiny Home Syndrome. 1.3764 0.03975 271 195 50 26
539 Oh, don't worry about that. Everything we discuss remains confidential. 1.3764 0.03615 271 185 70 16
540 Yeah, I see your point. Sitting in a circle is the way to go. 1.3764 0.03799 271 190 60 21
541 They want me to get more billable hours. 1.3764 0.04043 271 197 46 28
542 Remind me which of you has anxiety induced bed wetting ? 1.3755 0.03960 269 193 51 25
543 Now, who has the bed-wetting problem? 1.3755 0.03890 269 194 50 24
544 Mr. Simmons. Would you say you feel under your boss? 1.3755 0.04198 269 199 37 32
545 Obviously, we'll start with the middle child. 1.3755 0.03632 269 184 69 16
546 This is a three tiered question.. 1.3755 0.03890 269 191 55 23
547 Yes, I'm a shrink and also an AirB&B hostess. 1.3755 0.04030 269 195 47 27
548 Might it be that you haven't moved on from college? 1.3755 0.03593 269 183 71 15
549 Okay, in our last session one of you passed me a note complaining about minorities and women always getting higher positions than they deserve. Let's explore that. 1.3755 0.03854 269 190 57 22
550 I think you're problems are a lot of bunk! 1.3750 0.05764 128 92 24 12
551 Okay, now we're all settled, welcome to sibling therapy 1.3745 0.03837 267 188 58 21
552 You are here because you've been caught lying. 1.3745 0.04016 267 193 48 26
553 So Tommy, you're upset your parents are fighting. Karen, you're worried your son is acting out in school, and Greg, you're worried about the structural integrity of this triple couch? 1.3745 0.03531 267 180 74 13
554 Gee Bernie, this Medicare for all isn't exactly what I had in mind. 1.3745 0.04120 267 196 42 29
555 Tell me Karen, how does being on top finally feel?” 1.3745 0.03837 267 188 58 21
556 It appears this pecking order is headed by the queen. 1.3745 0.04120 267 196 42 29
557 How do you think I stack up as a therapist? 1.3740 0.03773 262 182 62 18
558 Welcome to Group Therapy For Introverts. 1.3736 0.04142 265 194 41 29
559 OK, listen—if this is going to work, you each need to quit offering advice to the others! 1.3736 0.03705 265 183 65 17
560 I can see you're familiar with Maslow's hierarchy of couches. 1.3736 0.03929 265 189 53 23
561 This is the only way I can make ends meet on the hourly rate your insurance is willing to pay. 1.3736 0.03819 265 192 50 23
562 I understand you're hearing voices. 1.3736 0.03705 265 192 52 20
563 Before we begin, Who is rock, who is paper and who is scissors? 1.3736 0.04142 265 195 41 29
564 Thanks for asking—I used to be a couples' therapist, but I've recently been promoted. 1.3736 0.03856 265 187 57 21
565 And how does it feel, hating each other's mothers? 1.3736 0.03781 265 185 61 19
566 I know sometimes people can feel uncomfortable with group therapy, but trust me, it can really help. 1.3736 0.04311 265 200 31 34
567 Helen, are you always on top? 1.3726 0.04233 263 196 36 31
568 You may want to consider transferring to a less hostel work environment. 1.3726 0.03986 263 189 50 24
569 Ego, Superego, that question was actually meant for Id. 1.3726 0.03683 263 181 66 16
570 Why do you feel our time together is all bunk? 1.3726 0.03722 263 182 64 17
571 Karen, in our previous session you mentioned that you always feel overshadowed in your marriage. So I thought it might help today to start with you on top of John and Bill. 1.3726 0.04164 263 194 40 29
572 So, is it true you all became depressed at the same time, Peter, Paul and Mary? 1.3726 0.03875 263 186 56 21
573 So, claustrophobia, an inferiority complex and a fear of heights... Do you think you could rearrange yourselves so I can remember who's who? 1.3716 0.03538 261 176 73 12
574 You wanted universal health care; you got universal health care! 1.3716 0.04151 261 192 41 28
575 Welcome to court mandated therapy. Unfortunately we are experiencing budget cuts. 1.3707 0.03838 259 182 58 19
576 Welcome to HMO health insurance. 1.3696 0.04012 257 185 49 23
577 So, Carolyn, how does it feel to finally be able to talk over men? 1.3696 0.03818 257 180 59 18
578 So who here has the inferiority complex? 1.3696 0.04087 257 187 45 25
579 So you're having trouble sleeping? 1.3696 0.04160 257 189 41 27
580 On a scale of 1-to-3, how would you rate your fear of bed wetting. 1.3696 0.04339 257 193 31 32
581 I think you might have codependency issues. 1.3696 0.03485 257 178 67 12
582 Polygamy can cause many issues with communicating in a relationship. 1.3696 0.04269 257 192 35 30
583 I know this isn't ideal, but it's all your HMOs will cover. 1.3696 0.03818 257 180 59 18
584 It appears to be a classic case of MPR..Multiple Personality Reversal 1.3686 0.04399 255 194 28 33
585 Triage Done. No Small Talk. 1.3686 0.04257 255 190 36 29
586 No, I can’t 1.3686 0.04364 255 193 30 32
587 You’re just plain nuts, nuts, nuts. 1.3686 0.04071 255 185 46 24
588 For any of you, how long have you felt "not special"? 1.3686 0.03755 255 177 62 16
589 Insurance only pays a third of my fee 1.3686 0.04220 255 189 38 28
590 You all seem to feel nobody treats you as an individual. 1.3686 0.03877 255 180 56 19
591 This looks like a case of stack home syndrome. 1.3686 0.04328 255 192 32 31
592 Sorry, I overbooked. How does that make you feel? 1.3686 0.03877 255 180 56 19
593 Maybe I could have been clearer about our three for one special offer. 1.3686 0.03995 255 181 50 22
594 Numbers one through three, when did you first start to feel like you're not special? 1.3686 0.03755 255 177 62 16
595 Why do you feel that you are always competing for attention? 1.3686 0.04033 255 184 48 23
596 I got this idea from some pirates I met on the subway. 1.3676 0.04317 253 190 33 30
597 Psychoanalysis can work on multiple levels. 1.3676 0.03647 253 173 67 13
598 This works out even better when you use Uber Pool. 1.3676 0.04389 253 192 29 32
599 I wasn’t quite sure which one of you said you hated your mother. I’ll just indicate in my notes that all 3 of you feel the same way, ok? 1.3676 0.04244 253 188 37 28
600 For an additional fee you can have more legroom. 1.3672 0.03825 256 178 57 17
601 You don't get to vote. It's my thermostat. 1.3665 0.03958 251 179 52 20
602 hey hey hey 1.3665 0.04556 251 195 20 36
603 What’s your first memory of Groupon? 1.3665 0.04268 251 187 36 28
604 Coulda, shoulda, woulda: Next! 1.3665 0.03917 251 178 54 19
605 It appears there are numerous layers to the issue. 1.3665 0.03751 251 174 62 15
606 Okay so you’ve all had the same parents—— And? 1.3665 0.04230 251 186 38 27
607 Corporate pressures. I'm sure you'll understand. 1.3665 0.04305 251 186 33 29
608 And you’re sure the voices you’re hearing aren’t each other’s? 1.3665 0.03917 251 178 54 19
609 Who wants to start us off? Id? Ego? Super Ego? 1.3661 0.03844 254 179 57 18
610 Doc, I’m trying to be open minded but this seems like a lot of bunk. 1.3661 0.03924 254 181 53 20
611 Alright then, Bachelor # 3... 1.3661 0.04192 254 188 39 27
612 …but on the street it's known as Maslow's bunk bed of therapy. 1.3661 0.04374 254 193 29 32
613 Why? the landlord just tripled my rent. 1.3661 0.03844 254 179 57 18
614 Three Musketeers Disorder” is pretty rare, but I think I can help you. 1.3655 0.03978 249 178 51 19
615 When did the "ménage à trois" start to feel like a "je ne sais quoi" ? 1.3655 0.03812 249 174 59 16
616 Now, feel free to comment on each other's problems. It's called collaborative-scaffolding. I find that it triples my profits while freeing me up to do my grocery list. 1.3655 0.03978 249 178 51 20
617 trickle-down psychoanalysis 1.3655 0.03854 249 175 57 17
618 so, why DO the two of you keep calling her Shemp? 1.3651 0.04399 252 192 28 32
619 And Jane, How do you feel Darrell feels about what Scott says he’s feeling? 1.3644 0.03701 247 170 64 13
620 Go on, this is just between you and me and him and her 1.3644 0.03832 247 173 58 16
621 Let's start at the bottom and work our way up. 1.3644 0.03958 247 176 52 19
622 Your childhood sounds rough, but your mother is getting a great deal on this. 1.3644 0.03917 247 175 54 18
623 I’m afraid that you face very real dangers if we debunk Freud’s theories 1.3644 0.04278 247 184 36 27
624 Your problems are not unique. 1.3644 0.03832 247 173 58 15
625 Between the budget cuts and the lip service we give to inclusive excellence, this is how it's going to be. Get used to it. 1.3644 0.04392 247 187 30 30
626 I understand the three of you have some unresolved summer camp issues. 1.3636 0.03928 242 171 54 17
627 Honestly, George, I don’t know why you threw paper. 1.3633 0.04418 245 186 29 30
628 I'm going to have to ask the Id to stop impulsively answering all my questions and allow the Ego and Super-ego a chance to speak. 1.3633 0.03979 245 175 51 19
629 Get to the point, guys, Three-for-One-Thursday ends in three minutes. 1.3633 0.04303 245 183 35 27
630 My specialty is menage a trois. 1.3633 0.04144 245 179 43 23
631 Interesting, you all subscribe to The New Yorker. 1.3633 0.04021 245 176 49 20
632 No...no discounts, unless you all have the same neuroses! 1.3621 0.04085 243 175 46 21
633 What do you mean when you say you feel like your parents are always hovering over you? 1.3621 0.04043 243 175 48 20
634 Let’s get started on our first Medicare For All session 1.3621 0.03958 243 175 49 19
635 What makes you think you don't stack up? 1.3621 0.03871 243 171 56 16
636 All of you are telling me a lot of bunk. 1.3621 0.04288 243 181 36 26
637 Top bunk, you go first- What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done? 1.3621 0.04248 243 180 38 25
638 ‘First, I apologize. I’ll shut down my Groupon offer tomorrow." 1.3610 0.04023 241 173 49 19
639 Dr. Schneider's airbnb had certain drawbacks. 1.3610 0.04108 241 175 45 21
640 Welcome to your Groupon session. 1.3610 0.03892 241 170 55 16
641 Today, let’s work on your multiple personalities disorder. 1.3610 0.04023 241 173 49 19
642 Your problems are stacking up aren't they ? 1.3610 0.03847 241 169 57 15
643 Okay, who's the id this time? 1.3610 0.03802 241 168 59 14
644 One of you has a fear of the unknown. 1.3610 0.04353 241 181 33 27
645 Let me explain how the group discount works. 1.3598 0.03681 239 164 64 11
646 Alright then, who wants to go first? 1.3598 0.04536 239 184 24 31
647 The other two are from Airbnb. 1.3598 0.03912 239 169 54 16
648 Bob and Ted; how does having the woman on top make you feel? First one to ring the buzzer! 1.3598 0.04088 239 173 46 20
649 No no, two claps are for Paul, not for you Janice - You're not above anyone else. 1.3598 0.04379 239 178 32 27
650 I think the three of you are taking much too literally your 1st grade promise to be “best friends forever”. 1.3598 0.04088 239 173 46 20
651 How connected do you feel to the people around you? 1.3598 0.04045 239 172 48 19
652 It's the new Medicare for all guidelines. 1.3598 0.04298 239 178 36 25
653 So, I see we're making progress on the separation anxiety. 1.3598 0.03728 239 165 62 12
654 Who is the manager of this trois ? 1.3598 0.04419 239 181 30 28
655 I apologize for the inconvenience but my insurance dictates that I see x number of patients per day. 1.3598 0.04173 239 175 42 22
656 Now, about this feeling that the odds are stacked against you... 1.3598 0.04338 239 179 34 26
657 When did you begin to suspect you had three personalities? 1.3598 0.04298 239 178 36 25
658 Do all three of you think you have intimacy issues? 1.3598 0.04338 239 179 34 26
659 Your first mother is free. There’s a $10 per hour charge for each stepmother. 1.3598 0.04497 239 183 26 30
660 Susan, tell us about your elevated sense of anxiety in this relationship. 1.3598 0.04338 239 179 34 26
661 I want you to relax, close your eyes, and think of your favorite character from Star Trek. 1.3598 0.04458 239 182 28 29
662 Tiered insurance. Wait your turn. 1.3595 0.03834 242 170 57 15
663 How often do these summer camp nightmares re-occur? 1.3595 0.03834 242 170 57 15
664 I don't think this group rate experiment is such a good idea. 1.3595 0.04493 242 185 25 31
665 Let me explain: like hot air, transference rises. 1.3595 0.04337 242 182 33 27
666 Get ready contestants, the next question is worth $5000! 1.3595 0.04531 242 186 23 32
667 When did you first begin to think there were three of you ? 1.3595 0.03922 242 172 53 17
668 Well this isn't how I usually treat Middle Child Syndrome, but Peter why don't you start by sharing your point of view. 1.3595 0.04009 242 174 49 19
669 My office is a safe place for tiers. 1.3592 0.03889 245 174 54 17
670 If one of you can come up with a better idea to reduce my student debt,I’m all ears. 1.3586 0.04154 237 173 43 21
671 Yes, it's your mother's fault. Next question? 1.3586 0.04023 237 170 49 18
672 Ok, which of you feels the most alone? 1.3586 0.04525 237 181 25 30
673 No, George, you are not back in basic training! 1.3586 0.04445 237 179 28 28
674 On a scale of 1 to 3...... 1.3586 0.04067 237 171 47 19
675 Now that you are in a deep sleep, repeat after me: " We are all individuals" 1.3586 0.04445 237 180 28 28
676 Yes, you will get the family discount. 1.3586 0.03841 237 166 57 14
677 Please relax and welcome to your High Anxiety, Mid-life Crisis, Low Self Esteem Therapy Group. 1.3583 0.03899 240 170 54 16
678 Actually, I'm more of a Jenga-ian. 1.3574 0.04306 235 175 36 24
679 I find it interesting that you all claim that you feel like you don’t “stack up.” 1.3574 0.03954 235 167 52 15
680 I am sure you now realize, you all qualified for the group rate. 1.3574 0.03954 235 167 52 16
681 On page 13, paragraph 5, it states your session can be hosted simultaneously. Now who wants to go first? 1.3574 0.04472 235 179 28 28
682 I'm glad I was able to squeeze you all in. 1.3574 0.03766 235 163 60 12
683 I'm sorry, but your health insurance will only pay for semi-private therapy. 1.3574 0.04178 235 172 42 21
684 Try to solve one problem and two more show up. 1.3562 0.03929 233 165 53 15
685 I’m sorry, but the ad did say Groupon counseling. 1.3562 0.03929 233 165 53 15
686 So we're trying this new form of more comfortable group therapy. 1.3537 0.04384 229 171 33 24
687 I'm glad I could slot you all in this afternoon. 1.3537 0.03874 229 161 55 13
688 O.K. Subject. Mother always liked me best. Go! 1.3537 0.03824 229 160 57 12
689 Please state your names 1.3537 0.04384 229 172 33 24
690 Billy, your parents say you don't understand them and they want be treated like grown ups. 1.3537 0.04340 229 171 35 23
691 He did say he was going to go above and beyond in 2020 1.3524 0.04626 227 175 22 29
692 I don’t think he liked it when we called him Mickey. 1.3524 0.04584 227 175 24 28
693 Please, no more interruptions or double talk. 1.3524 0.04584 227 175 24 28
694 It's what the insurance company approved. 1.3524 0.03944 227 161 52 14
695 It's hard being the middle child. 1.3524 0.03894 227 160 54 13
696 Which one of you just whispered "psychology is a lot of bunk?" 1.3524 0.03844 227 162 49 14
697 Just know you're not alone. 1.3524 0.03844 227 159 56 12
698 Let's address this love triangle once and for all. 1.3524 0.03793 227 158 58 11
699 Number 2, how do feel about what number 1 said about number 3? 1.3524 0.04137 227 165 44 18
700 Crap! Only 33% this time 1.3524 0.04584 227 175 24 28
701 So you all have triplet telepathy? Who's the bitch with the problem? 1.3524 0.04668 227 176 20 30
702 How long have you felt you were one person? 1.3524 0.03741 227 157 60 10
703 Hoe long have you experienced this inferiority triplex? 1.3524 0.04626 227 176 22 29
704 Yes, Perhaps, No. 1.3524 0.03993 227 162 50 15
705 Yes, our office manager uses a computer, but I will still be billing you in triplicate. 1.3524 0.04541 227 174 26 27
706 ...and Lucy, how do you feel about Paul’s mother? 1.3524 0.04137 227 165 44 18
707 Welcome to Psychoanalysis For All brought to you by Medicare For All. 1.3524 0.03993 227 162 50 15
708 Which of you gets the gestalt in this grouping? 1.3524 0.04411 227 171 32 24
709 All of you are here because you don't know why you have a penis. 1.3524 0.04626 227 176 22 29
710 If you think they care what you're saying, you really shouldn't be in the narcissist's group session. 1.3516 0.05154 128 90 31 7
711 Let me start by debunking some misconceptions about group therapy. 1.3511 0.03813 225 157 57 11
712 Would anyone like refreshments? Buy three and get one free! 1.3511 0.04656 225 175 21 29
713 Please just take turns talking. Your managed care company only allows you ten minutes each. 1.3511 0.04438 225 169 30 24
714 I’m going to need a bigger notebook. 1.3511 0.03813 225 157 57 11
715 I'm afraid our times are about up. 1.3511 0.03760 225 162 49 13
716 Your therapy share discount will be applied on each session 1.3511 0.04348 225 168 35 22
717 I wonder whether it's professionally acceptable to use mass production outside Massachusetts? 1.3511 0.04482 225 171 29 25
718 Boys and girls, welcome to the GOP’s version of bunkbed psychiatry. 1.3511 0.04613 225 174 23 28
719 Bunk beds were on closeout. 1.3511 0.04526 225 172 27 26
720 Number 2, where would you take your psychiatrist for a once-in-a-lifetime trip? 1.3511 0.04065 225 162 47 16
721 I’m sorry but one of you should be Asian or Hispanic. 1.3511 0.03543 225 163 51 11
722 I think you misunderstood what 'co-pay' means. 1.3511 0.04208 225 165 41 19
723 whose turn 1.3511 0.04526 225 172 27 26
724 Welcome to our new Identity Psychiatry program. 1.3511 0.04613 225 173 23 28
725 I'm all for the economy and efficiency of group therapy, but perhaps it's not a good fit for such diversity. 1.3511 0.04526 225 172 27 26
726 I only want to hear from the middle child. 1.3511 0.03813 225 157 57 11
727 Today we will try to debunk some myths about group therapy. 1.3511 0.04015 225 161 49 15
728 Is anyone not part of Acme Discount Insurance? 1.3511 0.04526 225 172 27 26
729 These multi personality psychoanalysis sessions are getting harder and harder these days. 1.3511 0.04526 225 171 27 26
730 Let's start from the top so we can get to the bottom of this. 1.3500 0.04076 220 158 47 15
731 I'm sorry but I cannot accommodate a ménage á quatre. 1.3498 0.04686 223 173 20 29
732 Interesting. John, how does that make Karen feel? 1.3498 0.03833 223 161 47 13
733 My professional diagnosis is high anxiety, claustrophobia, and low self esteem 1.3498 0.03885 223 157 54 12
734 This is the Iowa Caucus it doesn’t have to be this difficult. 1.3498 0.04643 223 173 22 28
735 Managed Care 1.3498 0.04420 223 168 32 23
736 Assessment: ? Attachment Disorder? 1.3498 0.04599 223 171 24 27
737 Potential Client #2, do you have any traumatic childhood memories? 1.3498 0.04643 223 173 22 28
738 And I thought couples therapy was difficult... 1.3498 0.04038 223 160 48 15
739 You could make millions of dollars! Wait, forget i said that. Just,um,leave it here and don't tell anyone about it. 1.3498 0.04686 223 174 20 29
740 Man, this study is a great way to catch up on my sleep 1.3498 0.04510 223 170 28 24
741 Always remember, you're a unique, wonderful person. Each one of you. 1.3498 0.04088 223 160 46 16
742 Let's focus on hierarchical issues today. 1.3498 0.03833 223 156 56 11
743 This is a classic example of Middle Child Syndrome. 1.3486 0.03888 218 153 54 11
744 Separate checks? 1.3486 0.03833 218 152 56 10
745 What was there about Medicare for all that you didn't understand? 1.3486 0.04048 218 156 48 14
746 Bob finally got his wish of having a threesome. 1.3486 0.04251 218 160 40 18
747 So when did you first notice you had multiple personalities? 1.3486 0.04446 218 164 32 22
748 I hear you. I hear you. I hear you. 1.3486 0.03995 218 155 50 13
749 And how did that make you ALL feel? 1.3486 0.03995 218 155 50 13
750 This raises "split personality" to a whole new level. 1.3486 0.03300 218 154 54 7
751 Is this going to be one bill, or separate checks? 1.3486 0.03995 218 155 50 13
752 Don't tell me--your mothers said you were special. 1.3486 0.04493 218 165 30 23
753 You are hearing voices? Good! We are finally making some progress. 1.3484 0.03906 221 156 53 12
754 So, one of you is just the, Lyft driver? 1.3484 0.04111 221 160 45 16
755 Focus on yourself 1.3484 0.03958 221 157 51 13
756 Please think quietly about your problems, and then I'll prescribe everyone antidepressants. 1.3484 0.04010 221 158 49 14
757 When I agreed to be your counselor, I wasn't aware you meant a camp counselor. 1.3484 0.04010 221 158 49 14
758 Play sick! 1.3484 0.04629 221 171 23 27
759 But what do you 'Polyamo-need'? 1.3484 0.04629 221 171 23 27
760 If you’re thinking ‘A- Maze-ing’, I’m not either. 1.3472 0.04616 216 166 25 25
761 I apologize for the typo. This was to be a group session for compulsive stalkers. 1.3472 0.04522 216 164 29 23
762 Oh, yes, it was mentioned at the bottom of the coupon. 1.3472 0.04071 216 155 47 14
763 Thank you all for participating in my volume discount plan. 1.3472 0.03853 216 157 45 12
764 Ok, starting at the top, tell me more about the issues you are having with socialized medicine. 1.3472 0.03909 216 152 53 11
765 A human centipede? Damn ... that's messed up. 1.3470 0.04704 219 171 20 28
766 Welcome to the bed wetting diversion therapy group. 1.3470 0.04284 219 162 38 19
767 Lugers take your mark. Now get set... 1.3470 0.04704 219 170 20 28
768 The whole family in tiers—I’m listening 1.3470 0.03927 219 155 52 12
769 On a scale of one to ten, how are you feeling today? I'd just like an average score for the three of you? 1.3470 0.03927 219 155 52 12
770 A democrat has a strong chance in 2020. You likely will not get coronavirus. However, your mom has a point and maybe you should sign up for JDate. 1.3470 0.04381 219 164 34 21
771 I know, we all want to be the Jonas Brothers. 1.3470 0.04614 219 169 24 26
772 I assure you this is entirely confidential 1.3458 0.03930 214 151 52 11
773 Mmm ... I never thought family therapy would give me company... 1.3458 0.04599 214 164 26 24
774 So let's see. Is this transition going upward or downward? 1.3458 0.04599 214 164 26 24
775 This week, I want us to talk about how the hell Kathy got up there without a ladder 1.3458 0.04200 214 156 42 16
776 Just remember, you're never alone with schizophrenia. 1.3458 0.04303 214 158 38 18
777 And you think psychoanalysis is a lot of bunk? 1.3458 0.04040 214 153 48 13
778 So, lets get started, and thank you for using Groupon. 1.3458 0.04200 214 156 42 15
779 In case you're wondering, this is my accelerated plan to retirement 1.3458 0.04252 214 157 40 17
780 It's cheaper and you can make new friends! 1.3458 0.03874 214 150 54 10
781 Your Highness,as you stroll through your kingdom,it might help if your subjects saw you wearing pants 1.3458 0.04693 214 166 22 26
782 Starting from the top, how does that make you feel? 1.3458 0.04040 214 156 44 14
783 I believe this has gone well beyond co-dependency. 1.3458 0.04200 214 156 42 16
784 I'll be honest, this is first time I've counseled a menage a trois 1.3458 0.04303 214 158 38 18
785 And how long have you had these three distinct personalities? 1.3458 0.04404 214 160 34 20
786 So, the problem seems to be one personality with multiple patients. 1.3458 0.04252 214 157 40 17
787 Are you sure you want to talk about your multiple personalities while they are here? 1.3456 0.04210 217 159 41 17
788 Yes, you can bunk on it. 1.3443 0.04581 212 162 27 23
789 So, you were saying you don't feel valued? 1.3443 0.04225 212 155 41 16
790 Would you say anything else if we were alone? 1.3443 0.03952 212 150 51 11
791 Weere all verrysad here xx today that1 1.3443 0.04819 212 167 17 28
792 Your insurance only covers family therapy, so this is the model we have to use. One of you is the victim, one has to be co-dependant, and of course, it will all be the mother’s fault. 1.3443 0.04225 212 155 41 16
793 How thoughtful to bring your own couch 1.3443 0.04381 212 158 35 19
794 First there was Uber ride sharing, then therapist Groupons. What's next? 1.3443 0.04482 212 159 31 21
795 You think this is bad?? TrumpCare originally wrote off psychotherapy altogether 1.3443 0.04172 212 154 43 15
796 As your throuples therapist, let me say, "Welcome, welcome, welcome." 1.3443 0.04172 212 154 43 15
797 This idea came to me when I worked as a camp counselor during college. 1.3443 0.04432 212 159 33 20
798 Let's start with your mother. From top to bottom. 1.3443 0.04225 212 155 41 16
799 And now the same question to number 2 1.3443 0.04330 212 157 37 18
800 ''One bill?" 1.3443 0.04118 212 153 45 14
801 Don't tell me, tell your HMO. 1.3429 0.04031 210 150 48 12
802 I think we'll first need to address the issue of boundaries. 1.3429 0.03858 210 147 54 9
803 Since you suffer from multiple personalities, I'll be billing you three times. 1.3429 0.04660 210 160 24 24
804 I've gathered you here because you've all dreamed of being human playing cards in a game of three-card monte. 1.3413 0.04591 208 159 27 22
805 Lets be clear- There is no buy two get one free for three therapy sessions at the same time. It wouldn't be professional ! 1.3413 0.04741 208 160 21 25
806 Let’s discuss feelings of inadequacy that arose after a seventy-eight-year-old white guy pushed you gay/black/female folks out of the running for the Democratic nomination. 1.3413 0.04331 208 154 37 16
807 Unfortunately, the decrease in Medicare reimbursement has forced me to rearrange my patient schedule 1.3413 0.03878 208 146 53 9
808 OK, so it’s a ménage a trois but you still get 3 separate bills. 1.3413 0.04054 208 149 47 12
809 No, I said you should all be on 'meds'. 1.3413 0.04277 208 153 39 16
810 When I suggested spending more time with friends, this is not exactly what I had in mind 1.3412 0.04071 211 152 46 13
811 Just remember that you're not alone. 1.3399 0.04118 203 146 45 12
812 Well, you begged me to squeeze you in today. 1.3398 0.04192 206 150 42 14
813 Mary, why do you feel that being part of a thruple means you have to do everything with Peter and Paul? 1.3398 0.04019 206 147 48 11
814 What's your problem? What's your problem? And what's your problem? 1.3398 0.04358 206 153 36 17
815 What will it be? One patient or twenty minutes each. 1.3398 0.03899 206 145 52 9
816 You have multiple personality disorder, but that's normal for multiple people. 1.3398 0.04078 206 148 46 12
817 Ok I’m gonna ask if any of you have been having suicidal thoughts, majority rules on this one. 1.3398 0.04304 206 152 38 16
818 Shoulda... coulda... woulda... Next!! 1.3398 0.04192 206 150 42 14
819 This one our last mouse, i hope it works this time! 1.3397 0.04572 209 159 27 22
820 Ground rule #1: Never debunk one another. 1.3397 0.04419 209 157 33 19
821 I know who farted, actually. 1.3390 0.04449 177 128 38 11
822 He already has @ name and trademark: the Ratjetpack 1.3382 0.04756 204 159 21 24
823 Just out of curiosity, how much does Costco charge you for these sessions? 1.3382 0.04042 204 146 47 11
824 No, I do not see your issues as a lot of bunk. 1.3382 0.04218 204 149 41 14
825 Welcome to the next meeting of Bed Wetters Anonymous. Ready to start? Who wants to go first? 1.3382 0.04274 204 150 39 15
826 Update on your insurance coverage. You each have twenty minutes, or sixty minutes talking at the same time. 1.3382 0.04218 204 152 37 15
827 This would be a lot easier if you had the same mother. 1.3382 0.04274 204 150 39 15
828 Of course we can afford medicare for all 1.3382 0.04101 204 147 45 12
829 The cost of office space has tripled, so this is my work around 1.3382 0.04218 204 149 41 14
830 Your insurance won't cover individual sessions. So, how does that make each of you feel. 1.3382 0.04386 204 152 35 17
831 I suspect multiple personality disorder. Which one of you has insurance? 1.3382 0.04160 204 148 43 13
832 Trust me, you will appreciate it more when my fee is split 3 ways. 1.3382 0.04101 204 149 42 13
833 HMO Psychoanalysis 1.3382 0.04386 204 152 35 16
834 You share the same psychosis, so why not? 1.3382 0.04160 204 148 43 13
835 You can each have an ego. It doesn't have to be just one of you. 1.3382 0.04160 204 148 43 13
836 No one loves you ...same problem you all three have... that’s why I gave you a discount ! 1.3382 0.04331 204 151 37 16
837 Kathleen, tell me, why do you feel that Doug and Brian are beneath you? 1.3382 0.03921 204 144 51 9
838 The group rate allows you to express your feelings in series or parallel. 1.3382 0.04042 204 146 47 11
839 So... you're all in a bit of a bunk? 1.3382 0.04705 204 158 23 23
840 This is my first polygamist marriage counseling session, so I've made some adjustments. 1.3382 0.04331 204 151 37 16
841 How about Cancun this year,Puerto Rico next year and Barbados to follow? 1.3382 0.04601 204 156 27 21
842 Well, you DID purchase your sessions through Groupon. 1.3382 0.04101 204 147 45 12
843 Who farted? 1.3382 0.04499 207 157 30 20
844 I am glad you all took on the 3 for 1 promotion. 1.3366 0.04414 202 151 34 17
845 I’ll cut my fees in three. 1.3366 0.04789 202 158 20 24
846 Have you considered switching Martha to the middle bunk to save your threesome? 1.3366 0.04358 202 150 36 16
847 Yes, last weeks finalists bad, but I don't think your captions are any funnier. 1.3366 0.04632 202 155 26 21
848 Your mother, huh? Let’s just start from the top. 1.3366 0.04185 202 147 42 13
849 I think you'll find the ad clearly stated three for the price of one 1.3366 0.04185 202 147 42 13
850 There's always a catch with a Groupon voucher. 1.3366 0.04358 202 150 36 16
851 I would love to help you all,but the odds are stacked against that. 1.3366 0.04185 202 147 42 13
852 Now, do you see how much you have in common? 1.3366 0.03880 202 142 52 8
853 I’ve decided to take group therapy to new heights. 1.3366 0.04301 202 149 38 15
854 I promised you'd start to see things from a new perspective. That'll be twelve-thousand dollars. 1.3366 0.04414 202 151 34 17
855 John dear, I think what you’re trying to communicate is that you “feel” as if your parents are on top of you. Is that correct? 1.3366 0.04185 202 147 42 13
856 Well, it looks like your three hours are up. 1.3366 0.04243 202 148 40 14
857 What we have here is failure to separate. 1.3366 0.03942 202 143 50 9
858 How would you feel if you were all on the same level? 1.3350 0.04254 197 144 40 13
859 I'm sorry, Janet. Michael's problems are more interesting this week, so you'll need to give him the top couch. 1.3350 0.04270 200 147 39 14
860 One of you is Id. One of you is Ego. One of you is Superego. After the count of three shout out which you think you are. 1.3350 0.04386 200 149 35 16
861 I’m not sure I’ve ever heard of tri-polar disorder?” 1.3333 0.04175 198 144 42 12
862 You are working through your codependence very nicely, Clarence. You may move up one tier. Gertrude, please move down. 1.3333 0.04175 198 144 42 12
863 Look, this is New York. Deal with it. 1.3333 0.04051 198 142 46 10
864 I hope the bed wetter isn't on top... 1.3333 0.04414 198 148 34 16
865 Just because this is a hostel environment, I don't want you to think you're not in a safe space. 1.3333 0.03987 198 142 44 10
866 Bachelor #1, how did you relate to your mother? 1.3333 0.04296 198 146 38 14
867 I'm still repaying student loans. Just relax and say whatever comes to minds. 1.3333 0.03922 198 140 50 8
868 Before we begin, whose turn is it to cover the copay? 1.3333 0.04113 198 143 44 11
869 Three stages of watching TV: The first: Fun, a time-filler. You look normal. The second: Anger, annoyance, a time-consumer. Your appearance has slipped. You are fat, for you don't exercise. The third: It's the only thing you do is You don't eat. 1.3333 0.04909 198 157 16 25
870 'How does it make you feel? How does it make you feel? How does it make you feel?' 1.3333 0.04113 198 143 44 11
871 You seem to be experiencing different levels of anxiety. 1.3333 0.03856 198 139 52 7
872 No, I still charge the same. 1.3333 0.04414 198 148 34 15
873 BernieCare 1.3333 0.04414 198 148 34 16
874 Remember it’s Yes, and...top to bottom. 1.3333 0.04696 198 152 24 21
875 Why do you feel you'll never stack up? 1.3333 0.04716 162 119 32 11
876 Well, it's less a sleep disorder and more of a Sleeping Car disorder 1.3333 0.04529 198 150 30 18
877 No, I am not dissing the dissonance, please continue. 1.3316 0.04673 196 151 25 20
878 Come on, you three. That's a lot of bunk. 1.3316 0.03944 196 139 49 8
879 Just so you know, you can upgrade at any time to the gold plan where there's just two of you or to the platinum plan where you're the only one. 1.3316 0.04138 196 142 43 11
880 So you have chosen a TherapyPOOL session. Let me know if any of you' want to switch to TherapySELECT . 1.3316 0.04074 196 141 45 10
881 Whether or not you booked through Groupon, this still points to separation anxiety." 1.3316 0.04263 196 144 39 13
882 And what do you like to do as a threesome? 1.3316 0.04728 196 152 23 21
883 This group therapy session would go more smoothly if you all had the same issues. 1.3316 0.03669 196 146 42 8
884 Okay, that's our time... Send in the next three! 1.3316 0.04443 196 147 33 16
885 Not all at once, please! 1.3316 0.04324 196 145 37 14
886 Well, it's not my problem your parents didn't read the Groupon fine print. 1.3316 0.04010 196 145 40 11
887 I thought you said you had mixed personalities 1.3316 0.04838 196 154 19 23
888 Let's start by debunking your imaginary friends. 1.3306 0.05033 121 86 30 5
889 No matter how efficient I get, the work keeps piling up. 1.3299 0.04227 194 142 40 12
890 It's your mother. 1.3281 0.04502 192 145 31 16
891 I know, but this is how the buy one get two coupon deal works. 1.3281 0.04188 192 140 41 11
892 Group therapy is a bunch of bunk! 1.3263 0.04713 190 147 24 19
893 I wonder if Groupon was a good idea. 1.3263 0.04147 190 138 42 10
894 Ikea's new "kødependnt" line of sofas. 1.3263 0.04147 190 138 42 10
895 In lieu of sliding scale, I'm offering hostel rates. 1.3263 0.04080 190 141 38 11
896 So, it sounds like the whole college roommate thing isn't working so well. 1.3263 0.04011 190 136 46 8
897 Before we get started, I'll need the Groupon from one of you. 1.3263 0.04214 190 139 40 11
898 Let's discuss sibling rivalry: all talk at once. 1.3263 0.04080 190 137 44 9
899 In Uber Therapy it’s his hour but you two can take it anywhere you want. 1.3263 0.04080 190 137 44 9
900 I need to read these groupons more closely 1.3263 0.03870 190 138 44 8
901 Who is holding the Groupon voucher? 1.3262 0.04584 187 142 29 15
902 Why does Superego always get the top? 1.3262 0.04457 187 140 33 14
903 OK, so which of you is the id and which the ego? 1.3262 0.04769 187 144 23 19
904 We won't get anywhere unless you're level with me. 1.3262 0.04457 187 140 33 14
905 So, last session we established that you may be a tiny bit obsessed with "This Is Us." 1.3262 0.04521 187 141 31 15
906 You should've seen what I had to do for the Brady Bunch kids. 1.3262 0.04191 187 136 41 10
907 Please understand that you have literally raised separation anxiety to a new level. 1.3262 0.04122 187 135 43 9
908 Which one of you is the id? 1.3262 0.04457 187 140 33 14
909 On the bright side, we will also split your copay three ways. 1.3262 0.04052 187 134 45 8
910 What if I told you this was not a dream. 1.3262 0.03980 187 133 47 7
911 I use Maslow's hierarchy of couches. 1.3262 0.03680 187 140 38 7
912 What you're feeling is common for the sandwich generation. 1.3262 0.04457 187 140 33 14
913 This is new for me too, but we have just been overwhelmed since the impeachment business failed. 1.3262 0.04457 187 140 33 14
914 ...and then I thought, 'how are we ever going to make the payments on a Lamborghini'... 1.3262 0.04326 187 138 37 12
915 Guys, please be quiet. Jeff's sharing with us about his intimacy issues. 1.3262 0.04647 187 143 27 17
916 Ironically, I think your costs would increase if we took out the middle-man. 1.3250 0.04738 160 119 30 11
917 Repeat after me: Our democracy is strong enough to survive this. 1.3245 0.04307 188 139 37 12
918 It's the Sanders Plan. No premium. No copay. No waiting. 1.3243 0.04217 185 135 39 10
919 Now, starting with you Mary, I want each of you to tell me how you feel about your current position. 1.3243 0.04487 185 139 32 14
920 And how does it make you feel that the other two quintuplets are in the basement? 1.3243 0.04354 185 137 36 12
921 I understand one you feels he needs more space. 1.3243 0.04286 185 136 38 11
922 I know you are disappointed, but this is what a ménage a trois is at a psychiatrist’s office. 1.3243 0.04421 185 138 34 13
923 do you have any more personalities? or is that it. 1.3243 0.04076 185 133 44 8
924 If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands. 1.3243 0.04421 185 138 34 13
925 Studies show, the key to effective group therapy is vertical integration. 1.3224 0.04314 183 135 37 11
926 Bachelor number 3, if we were on a date and I stepped away, what toppings would you order on my pizza? 1.3224 0.04172 183 133 41 9
927 Welcome to group therapy, we are here to help you not fix you 1.3224 0.04584 183 139 29 15
928 You have been arranged according to your credit rating. 1.3224 0.04518 183 138 31 14
929 Which of your three personalities would like to begin? 1.3204 0.04124 181 131 42 8
930 No, there really are three of you. 1.3204 0.04549 181 137 30 14
931 Let's get back to that dream where you're a BLT 1.3204 0.04270 181 135 35 11
932 Parallel processing seems to come naturally for you. 1.3204 0.04549 181 137 30 14
933 When none of you talk at once, it makes me think you don’t want to be here. 1.3204 0.04270 181 133 38 10
934 Well, bad luck does come in threes... 1.3204 0.04481 181 136 32 13
935 Maybe next time you'll read the Groupon fine print. 1.3204 0.04412 181 135 34 12
936 Because you all have the same problem... 1.3204 0.04412 181 135 34 12
937 Hey, this is what you get when you book a therapist through Costco 1.3204 0.04342 181 134 36 11
938 Im afraid I can't help if you insist on talking over each other 1.3204 0.04342 181 134 36 11
939 It’s a sharing economy, Judith. 1.3204 0.04124 181 131 42 8
940 Let’s get started. Who’s on first? 1.3204 0.04412 181 135 34 12
941 Let's begin today's session about the relevance of birth order. 1.3204 0.04342 181 134 36 11
942 Now, what makes you think your parents don't respect your privacy?" 1.3204 0.04198 181 132 40 9
943 So if you'd just call out when I mention your symptom. Mania? Paranoia? Anxiety? ……... 1.3204 0.04270 181 133 38 10
944 Maybe you guys should knock next before you decide to give your parents breakfast in bed 1.3204 0.04198 181 132 40 9
945 All right, let’s begin with the patient in First Class, and then we’ll work our way down. 1.3204 0.04198 181 132 40 9
946 You may be inseparable, but I charge individual rates. 1.3204 0.03973 181 129 46 6
947 So this is what airbnb in San Francisco looks like... 1.3187 0.04391 182 136 34 12
948 And when did you first feel that you were not being treated as an individual? 1.3187 0.04179 182 133 40 9
949 I think you've misunderstood the meaning of "multiple personality disorder." 1.3184 0.04370 179 133 35 11
950 And after all of that, you still went back to camp? 1.3184 0.04370 179 133 35 11
951 ...the good news is that that several promising studies are underway exploring unshackling the bonding experience of extended cruise ship quarantine. 1.3184 0.04370 179 133 35 11
952 Let's start with this. Please tell me how you feel about Trumpcare. 1.3184 0.04441 179 134 33 12
953 Your problem, as I see it, is that you’re living on top of each other. 1.3184 0.04224 179 131 39 9
954 For next week's special I'm offering to discuss two personal failures for the price of one. 1.3184 0.04648 179 137 27 15
955 So all three of you are saying that you don't believe the bunk you've been given. 1.3184 0.04511 179 135 31 13
956 See Arthur, you aren`t the most screwed up person in New York. 1.3184 0.04370 179 133 35 11
957 Group counseling? 1.3184 0.04511 179 135 31 13
958 Okay, Listen up. This is Bunker Therapy. 1.3184 0.05099 179 144 13 22
959 Your insurance won't cover your Id, Ego, and Superego 1.3184 0.04511 179 135 31 13
960 Democrat, Republican, and Independent, see, we all can get together and stay off Facebook 1.3184 0.04370 179 133 35 11
961 Welcome everyone, I'll be your trichiatrist. 1.3184 0.04511 179 135 31 13
962 Don't everybody talk at once. 1.3184 0.04298 179 132 37 10
963 Are you sure that you're triplets? 1.3184 0.04441 179 134 33 12
964 I'm not any happier with this new Preferred Physician network than you are. 1.3184 0.04648 179 137 27 15
965 It’s okay, go ahead. Tiers are perfectly healthy. 1.3184 0.04370 179 133 35 11
966 And what makes you think you have separation anxiety? 1.3184 0.04511 179 135 31 13
967 Well, Russell, you do exhibit all the traits of the middle child... 1.3184 0.04149 179 130 41 8
968 To be honest, until today I didn't think your other personalities were real. 1.3184 0.04370 179 133 35 11
969 Eeny, meeny, miney, mo. 1.3184 0.04648 179 137 27 15
970 ‘Who’s on first?’ 1.3184 0.04580 179 136 29 14
971 Now tell me how you all came to believe you were the same person. 1.3184 0.04149 179 130 41 8
972 Didn’t read the fine print on the HMO guidelines, huh? 1.3184 0.03995 179 137 33 9
973 How would you describe your childhood. Anyone? 1.3184 0.04511 179 136 28 14
974 Moving to the top bunk is not the change we've been talking about. 1.3164 0.04682 177 136 26 15
975 What makes you think you have multiple personality disorder? 1.3164 0.04251 177 134 32 10
976 Perhaps you didn’t understand how a group health plan works. 1.3164 0.04325 177 131 36 10
977 I should have said that the three session package deal was not transferrable. 1.3164 0.04097 177 127 42 7
978 Therapy can help you on many different levels. 1.3164 0.04174 177 129 40 8
979 So, who didn't want the open relationship? 1.3164 0.03937 177 129 42 6
980 And just exactly how do these multiple personalities manifest themselves? 1.3164 0.04097 177 128 42 7
981 Let's see now: feeling low, middle child syndrome and fear of heights. 1.3164 0.04543 177 134 30 13
982 You're all summer camp counselors? What bunk. 1.3164 0.04682 177 136 26 15
983 You see? You're just as screwed up as everyone else! 1.3164 0.04613 177 135 28 14
984 The important think is that you know you're an individual. And so are you. And you. 1.3164 0.04097 177 128 42 7
985 You mentioned that you struggle with codependency. 1.3164 0.04174 177 129 40 8
986 So what makes you think you have multiple personalities? 1.3164 0.04174 177 129 40 8
987 Wait, which one of you had the mother who always forgot your birthday? 1.3164 0.04325 177 131 36 10
988 Next week, it's Lars' turn to be on top. 1.3164 0.04750 177 137 24 16
989 I'm just don't think you meet the criteria for split personality disorder. 1.3164 0.04471 177 133 32 12
990 Clearly you have childhood issues on multiple levels. 1.3164 0.04399 177 132 34 11
991 I'm sorry but you did ask for the "group" discount. 1.3164 0.04251 177 130 38 9
992 So how long have you been sleeping in the same room with your imaginary friends? 1.3164 0.04399 177 132 34 11
993 Nope, it’s still just 1 hour. 1.3164 0.04399 177 132 34 11
994 Let's begin where we left off last week with the difficulties of being a holy trinity. 1.3164 0.04543 177 134 30 13
995 Why don’t we start with you, Sybil? 1.3143 0.04277 175 129 37 9
996 Remember, no splitting my fee. 1.3143 0.05792 105 79 19 7
997 I'm getting the sense that you've all begun to accept the sobering realization that psychoanalysis is actually a lot of bunk. 1.3143 0.04574 175 133 29 13
998 So tell me about yourselves. 1.3143 0.04200 175 128 39 8
999 How long have you three shared the one personality? 1.3143 0.04354 175 130 35 10
1000 And this wasn’t what you were expecting when MaryAnn invited you over for a threesome? 1.3143 0.04428 175 131 33 11
1001 I am sorry, but your insurance only covers trichiatry. 1.3143 0.04574 175 133 29 13
1002 This is perplexing on so many levels. 1.3143 0.04041 175 126 43 6
1003 Let’s debunk that together. 1.3143 0.04428 175 131 33 11
1004 So hows the happy thruple? 1.3143 0.04354 175 130 35 10
1005 Those are all valid feelings, but I'd like to focus more on your separation anxiety. 1.3143 0.04354 175 130 35 10
1006 John, tell me again about feeling trapped? 1.3143 0.03958 175 125 45 5
1007 Let’s try and debunk your codependency. 1.3143 0.04354 175 130 35 10
1008 Unfortunately, cuts to health insurance mean we have to combine sessions. How does that make you feel? 1.3143 0.04646 175 134 27 14
1009 "Welcome to BunkBnT." 1.3143 0.04574 175 133 29 13
1010 Proof again that misery loves company. 1.3143 0.04277 175 129 37 9
1011 It's called a 'collective unconscious' so it's not important which of you answers the question. 1.3143 0.04121 175 127 41 7
1012 I thought you’d all be glad to know that you’re not alone in your suffering. 1.3143 0.04121 175 127 41 7
1013 In all fairness, I did tell you this is my most popular time slot. 1.3143 0.04041 175 126 43 6
1014 That's correct, the offer was three issues for one price. 1.3143 0.04354 175 130 35 10
1015 What you say here remains confidential. 1.3143 0.04428 175 131 33 11
1016 Rest assured that you'll still receive a personalized bill. 1.3140 0.04326 172 125 36 9
1017 Now that you have decided who will be on top, let us begin. 1.3140 0.04845 172 134 22 16
1018 I'd prefer we keep the focus on the roommate situation, but sure Dennis, go ahead and weigh in on Elisa's relationship with her mother. 1.3140 0.04630 172 131 28 13
1019 So, Middle Guy, how do you feel about sharing with Top Guy and Bottom Guy which one of them is the father. 1.3140 0.04984 172 136 18 18
1020 You each have “ multiple personalities disorders “ 1.3140 0.04326 172 127 36 9
1021 Tell me more about your fathers. 1.3140 0.04247 172 126 38 8
1022 Remember to never feel ashamed and that you are not alone. 1.3140 0.04774 172 133 24 14
1023 One more time, starting from the top. 1.3140 0.04247 172 126 38 8
1024 All three of you have the exact same problems requiring the exact same therapy. That's why! 1.3140 0.04404 172 128 34 10
1025 Yes, I understand completely. But, your copayments will decrease by two-thirds. 1.3140 0.04404 172 128 34 10
1026 How long have you felt that nobody focuses on your needs? 1.3140 0.04630 172 131 28 13
1027 What about your professional discount did you not understand? 1.3140 0.04630 172 131 28 13
1028 3...2...1...Liftoff 1.3140 0.05051 172 137 16 19
1029 The insurance company asked me to triple my productivity. 1.3140 0.04556 172 130 30 12
1030 I sense the underlying issue is white male privilege." 1.3140 0.04326 172 127 36 9
1031 And how long have you had this feeling of not being treated as an individual? 1.3140 0.03999 172 123 44 5
1032 We want your mortuary preparation training to last a lifetime. 1.3140 0.05051 172 136 16 19
1033 Patient number 3, what is your most traumatic childhood memory? 1.3140 0.04404 172 128 34 10
1034 I must admit I completely misunderstood your threesome request." 1.3140 0.04247 172 126 38 8
1035 Beatrice, Leonard and Thomas, you just need a toast. 1.3140 0.05184 172 139 12 21
1036 So, tell me more about your not feeling like an individual... 1.3140 0.04481 172 129 32 11
1037 After our session is concluded, please don't forget to rate me on the Uber Therapy Pool app. 1.3140 0.04481 172 129 32 11
1038 Three for the price of one? Seriously? 1.3140 0.04703 172 134 23 15
1039 Since none of you want to face your problems I thought this might help. 1.3140 0.04845 172 134 22 16
1040 Bunk beds tell me a great deal about family dynamics 1.3140 0.04556 172 130 30 12
1041 And when would you say you first started having doubts about the sharing economy? 1.3140 0.04247 172 126 38 8
1042 OK, any questions on how individual group therapy works?" 1.3140 0.04247 172 126 38 8
1043 Welcome to our first session, or what I like to call how Medicare for all covers therapy 1.3140 0.04481 172 129 32 11
1044 And Mr. Id, how did it make you feel when Mr. Superego told you to go to CrossFit? 1.3140 0.04630 172 131 28 13
1045 And now let's try to debunk some of these sentiments. 1.3128 0.04135 179 131 40 8
1046 When did it become clear that your clever menagerie a trois included snakes and lizards? 1.3121 0.05025 173 138 16 19
1047 Sorry guys, this is Medicare for All. 1.3121 0.04533 173 131 30 12
1048 This is certainly the most severe case of multiple personalities I’ve ever had to treat. 1.3121 0.04146 173 126 40 7
1049 Three used to be a crowd, but now it's a group. 1.3121 0.04458 173 130 32 11
1050 Now that your multiple personalities are comfortable, let's discuss your fear of heights. 1.3121 0.04533 173 131 30 12
1051 $45 upcharge for the accompanying ladder—what a swindle. Some of the support brackets were missing too.” 1.3121 0.04820 173 135 22 15
1052 Sorry, group rates only apply to schizophrenia; but you are eligible for my shrink two get one free offer. 1.3121 0.04607 173 132 28 13
1053 Alright then, how connected do you feel to the people around you? 1.3121 0.04226 173 127 38 8
1054 Dysfunction for $500 1.3121 0.04820 173 135 22 16
1055 And at out next session, Alice, you can be the middle child. 1.3121 0.04458 173 130 32 11
1056 I sense a hierarchy in your ‘throuple’ 1.3121 0.04382 173 129 34 10
1057 "Let's start with your mother. And your mother. Oh, and I guess your mother, too." 1.3121 0.04064 173 125 42 6
1058 We’re here to work through your tiers. 1.3121 0.04146 173 126 40 7
1059 And is this your first time visiting a therapist for your codependency? 1.3121 0.04146 173 126 40 7
1060 My husband wants me to work less hours. 1.3121 0.04226 173 127 38 8
1061 Who wants to go first? Id? Ego? Superego? 1.3121 0.04305 173 128 36 9
1062 First off, I'd like to thank you for participating in our group therapy program. 1.3121 0.04607 173 132 28 13
1063 So it’s agreed - we all hate our fathers? 1.3121 0.04382 173 129 34 10
1064 I said you needed to change your attitude, not your altitude. 1.3121 0.04382 173 129 34 10
1065 I'd like to try a new method, top-down processing. Jane, let's start with you. 1.3118 0.04737 170 131 25 13
1066 And you still feel you have the middle child syndrome? 1.3118 0.04274 170 125 37 8
1067 With your insurance plans, it’s either this or twenty minutes each. 1.3118 0.04108 170 123 41 6
1068 So tell me, what brings you in for throuple’s therapy? 1.3118 0.04434 170 127 33 10
1069 This is the city, do you have any idea how much it would cost for a waiting room? 1.3118 0.04663 170 130 27 13
1070 Last week you told me you felt under water, but this week you're telling me you feel like you're actually in a submarine? 1.3118 0.05091 170 136 15 19
1071 Sorry I forgot but which of you is afraid of heights? 1.3118 0.04274 170 127 34 9
1072 Tell me again why you feel you're not getting enough special attention. 1.3118 0.04663 170 130 27 13
1073 Cost effective alternatives to universal healthcare 1.3118 0.04274 170 125 37 8
1074 Efficient, yes. Effective remains to be seen. 1.3118 0.04022 170 122 43 5
1075 Your HMO thinks this is innovative. 1.3118 0.04108 170 123 41 6
1076 This is the first time I have ever done throuple’s therapy. 1.3118 0.04354 170 126 35 9
1077 I think we should start with Mom. 1.3118 0.04022 170 122 43 5
1078 I want you all to think back on that night at summer camp. 1.3118 0.04108 170 126 37 7
1079 I'm sorry, which one of you just said that thing about your mother?" 1.3103 0.04361 174 130 34 10
1080 I'm sorry for the stacking, but we have a backlog of therapist cartoon captions. 1.3099 0.04713 171 132 25 14
1081 What part of Medicare for All did you not understand? 1.3099 0.04489 171 129 31 11
1082 You'll find these group sessions to be beneficial and cost effective. So Lauren let's start with your fear of heights then dig into Nicks issues middle child syndrome and finish with Mikes fear of being crushed. 1.3099 0.04489 171 129 31 11
1083 How long have you been binge-watching “This is Us” together? 1.3099 0.04333 171 127 35 9
1084 The Jingleheimer Schmidt triplets were having a hard time coping with all being named John Jacob 1.3099 0.04565 171 130 29 12
1085 Next week, we’ll try talking and by month’s end we might be ready to try eye contact. 1.3099 0.04253 171 126 37 8
1086 Well this is awkward...Your insurance just called and they said they’re only able to cover one of your personalities for therapy. 1.3099 0.04411 171 128 33 10
1087 Due to patient confidentiality, I'm unable to use your real names. 1.3099 0.04713 171 132 25 14
1088 Why don't you start, Mrs. Wallenda? 1.3099 0.04489 171 129 31 11
1089 If it's not one thing, it's your mother. 1.3099 0.04489 171 129 31 11
1090 You're here because you're not special. Who would like to start? 1.3099 0.04411 171 128 33 10
1091 I just wanted to let you all know ... this is my first threesome. 1.3099 0.04171 171 125 39 7
1092 I'll need more time to debunk this one 1.3099 0.04253 171 126 37 8
1093 What makes you think I'm a cut-rate psychiatrist? 1.3099 0.04253 171 124 37 8
1094 So you were saying...you feel your mother never gave you her undivided attention? 1.3099 0.04253 171 125 37 8
1095 Before we start, there’s the 33% co-pay. 1.3098 0.04054 184 135 41 8
1096 I don't think the new system is impersonal at all, Patient #24601 1.3095 0.04301 168 124 36 8
1097 When did you start feeling like people were always talking over you? 1.3095 0.04464 168 126 32 10
1098 Before we discuss mothers, let's talk about boundaries in Groupon therapy." 1.3095 0.04697 168 129 26 13
1099 The group discount does not apply to the bottom bunk. 1.3095 0.04301 168 124 36 8
1100 Have you ever considered a tub? 1.3095 0.04920 168 132 20 15
1101 Of course you have doctor-patient confidentiality. 1.3095 0.04218 168 123 38 7
1102 Id, why don't you start. 1.3095 0.04464 168 126 32 10
1103 OK. Thanks for sharing, super-ego. I think it's time we heard now from the Id. 1.3095 0.04697 168 131 23 14
1104 Thank you all for signing the Privacy Notice. Let the healing begin... 1.3095 0.04464 168 126 32 10
1105 Let's start with why you feel there's a pecking order. 1.3095 0.04543 168 127 30 11
1106 Sorry about the crowd Charlie, Medicare for all has caused some issues. 1.3095 0.04301 168 124 36 8
1107 And how does that make you -- Oh, we have to stop now. And how does that make you -- Oh, we have to stop now. And how does that make you -- Oh, we have to stop now. 1.3095 0.04543 168 127 30 11
1108 Multiple personalities doesn’t mean three people, I’m afraid. 1.3095 0.04383 168 125 34 9
1109 Now Greg, tell me more about the voices you hear. 1.3095 0.04218 168 123 38 7
1110 Psychiatry in the age of socialized medicine. 1.3095 0.04464 168 126 32 10
1111 And based on your goals, the app will figure out who is done with treatment first, second, etc. 1.3095 0.04621 168 128 28 12
1112 ...I really need to rethink "Three for One" Thursdays 1.3095 0.04383 168 125 34 9
1113 So, tell me, why do you think you suffer from schizophrenia? 1.3095 0.04773 168 130 24 14
1114 Since the need for mental health care tripled since Trump took office, Dr. Green found a way to provide it! 1.3095 0.04383 168 124 34 9
1115 Three more who believe the New Yorker caption contest has run its course. 1.3095 0.04847 168 130 22 15
1116 So to summarize our last session, Ego and Supergo could no longer tolerate Id... 1.3095 0.04383 168 125 34 9
1117 So, DeWayne, when she said "threesome", what was the first thing that went through your mind? 1.3095 0.04132 168 122 40 6
1118 In your case, multiple personalities isn't a disorder. 1.3095 0.04218 168 127 31 9
1119 So, which one of you is Bacon, which one of you is Lettuce, and which one is Tomato? 1.3095 0.04218 168 127 32 8
1120 Not so sure about this groupon therapy. 1.3095 0.04847 168 131 22 15
1121 I said that it would more economical, not necessarily more therapeutic. 1.3095 0.04301 168 124 36 8
1122 So you're saying you feel that men are beneath you? 1.3095 0.04383 168 125 34 9
1123 I thought they hired me to work with "hostile" youths. 1.3095 0.04697 168 129 26 13
1124 Welcome to progressive Mormon marriage counseling. 1.3095 0.04301 168 124 36 8
1125 Trust me, you're not the first ones in here from trying a three-way. 1.3095 0.04383 168 125 34 9
1126 You seem to be having issues with sharing your feelings. 1.3095 0.04218 168 123 38 7
1127 With the discount plan, each of you can only express one third of your problems. 1.3095 0.04218 168 123 38 7
1128 Our confide-share program is the most cost effective therapy since screaming into your pillow. 1.3095 0.04383 168 125 34 9
1129 Remember, patients a,b,and c, that you are unique and special - and a little cheap. Next! 1.3095 0.04383 168 125 34 9
1130 Just to be clear, Ted, the discount only applies if you all stick to the same psychosis. 1.3095 0.04464 168 126 32 10
1131 Each sibling will have one minute for direct response, and a lifetime for rebuttals. 1.3082 0.04367 159 119 32 8
1132 Astrid, why do you feel that 'male problems' are beneath you? 1.3072 0.04329 166 123 35 8
1133 What did you expect with Groupon®? 1.3072 0.05103 166 133 15 18
1134 How long have you been scared to be alone? 1.3072 0.04495 166 125 31 10
1135 In respect of your privacy I shall address you, from top to bottom, as superego, ego, and id. 1.3072 0.04244 166 122 37 7
1136 Just as a reminder, you each saved $11.37 by selecting the therapy pool option today. 1.3072 0.04329 166 123 35 8
1137 Have you considered that maybe ‘This is Us’ is not really about you? 1.3072 0.04244 166 122 37 7
1138 Welcome to all of you using Groupon. 1.3072 0.04244 166 122 37 7
1139 so you met on the train and then,what happened ? 1.3072 0.04413 166 124 33 9
1140 So the menage a trois didn't go like you'd hoped... 1.3049 0.04442 164 123 32 9
1141 So, how are you progressing with the concept of layered experience? 1.3049 0.04271 164 121 36 7
1142 Welcome to the therapy economy class. 1.3049 0.03999 164 118 42 4
1143 So, how long have you felt you were triplets? 1.3049 0.04526 164 124 30 10
1144 When did you begin thinking that you were a quartet instead of trio? 1.3025 0.04116 162 118 39 5
1145 It seems that the three of you have a single personality 1.3025 0.04558 162 123 29 10
1146 It’s called Groupon, what were you expecting? 1.3025 0.04473 162 122 31 9
1147 The insurance company said it was either this, or capping each client at a maximum of three sessions per year. On the bright side, I'm allowed to bill for two clients per session. 1.3025 0.05261 162 131 11 19
1148 Guys, congratulations on choosing our three-for-the-price-of-one discount offer. Just don't all talk at once, okay? 1.3025 0.04803 162 126 23 13
1149 I am one of the few therapists who will work with roommate conflicts. 1.3025 0.04298 162 120 35 7
1150 So, Sybil. Would you like to introduce your friends? 1.3025 0.04558 162 123 29 10
1151 Well, it comes down to this: We all have the same problems. 1.3025 0.04558 162 123 29 10
1152 Until I get conclusive evidence of multiple personality disorder, I'm going to have to charge you triple. 1.3025 0.04386 162 121 33 8
1153 When did you first imagine you were identical triplets? 1.3025 0.04558 162 123 29 10
1154 Jeffrey is fully participating in the group. He just needs a little more space. 1.3025 0.04641 162 124 27 11
1155 I know it's a group session but I'll still need 3 copays. 1.3025 0.04641 162 124 27 11
1156 Now what did one of you say about multitasking? 1.3025 0.04558 162 123 29 10
1157 So, when did you realize your weren't identical triplets? 1.3025 0.04298 162 119 32 8
1158 I don't think this is a genuine case of multiple personalities." 1.3025 0.04558 162 123 29 10
1159 I’m seeing signs of multiple personalities. 1.3025 0.04298 162 120 35 7
1160 This Coronavirus quarantine won’t last forever guys so let’s just deal with it, ok? So Rodney,any progress with your erectile dysfunction problems? 1.3025 0.04641 162 124 27 11
1161 So what brings you to menage therapy? 1.3025 0.04641 162 124 27 11
1162 It’s all going to be fine...next three please 1.3019 0.04701 159 122 26 10
1163 You know - there are three levels of awareness here. 1.3019 0.04065 159 117 37 5
1164 Coach class therapy is not as comfortable as first, but it gets you to the same place. 1.3006 0.04533 163 124 29 10
1165 Mr. Simms, I believe your multiple personality disorder is escalating. 1.3000 0.04590 160 122 28 10
1166 Why do you millennials think you are not treated as individual mature adults? 1.3000 0.04326 160 119 34 7
1167 When did you begin to believe that you are triplets? 1.3000 0.04326 160 119 34 7
1168 So Terry, what I understand is that you feel that your siblings are always above you. 1.3000 0.04140 160 117 38 5
1169 To be clear, I still need to charge each of you separately 1.3000 0.04140 160 119 34 6
1170 Your friends may dismiss your concerns as 'bunk,' but rest assured I'll listen 1.3000 0.04326 160 119 34 7
1171 Welcome to your first Summer Camp counseling sessoin. 1.3000 0.04675 160 123 26 11
1172 Okay, from the top down 1.3000 0.04416 160 120 32 8
1173 Look this healthcare for all is going to take some getting used to." 1.3000 0.04504 160 121 30 9
1174 Sometimes a bunk bed is just a bunk bed 1.3000 0.04234 160 118 36 6
1175 Remind me ... which one of you was dealing with impotency? 1.3000 0.04675 160 123 26 11
1176 Hostel therapy 1.3000 0.04504 160 121 30 9
1177 And how did that make us feel? 1.3000 0.04590 160 122 28 10
1178 I got the idea from my hair salon - three couches, no waiting! 1.3000 0.04140 160 117 38 5
1179 You only get the group rate if your problems are the same. 1.3000 0.04675 160 123 26 11
1180 Unfortunately, this style of therapy will soon be debunked 1.3000 0.04590 160 122 28 10
1181 I'd like to debunk the myth that I overbook my appointments. 1.2994 0.03940 167 121 42 4
1182 So, have any of you been in group therapy before? 1.2994 0.04377 157 117 33 7
1183 Pizza Rat?? Coffee Rat?? Wait till they get a load of me! 1.2975 0.05198 158 125 13 17
1184 I have a lot of patients who fantasize about threesomes. 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1185 I specialize in couple’s therapy for a Ménage á trios 1.2975 0.04535 158 120 29 9
1186 As this is a basic economy session, each patient is only allowed one repressed memory. 1.2975 0.04535 158 120 29 9
1187 It was in the insurance policy’s fine print. Anyway, let’s tackle today’s topic: trust issues 1.2975 0.04445 158 119 31 8
1188 Would you say the problems started immediately after you left the space station? 1.2975 0.04535 158 120 29 9
1189 What's on your minds? 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1190 Alright, I'll now be analyzing our platinum level patient. If the rest of you could just not listen that would be great. 1.2975 0.04260 158 117 35 6
1191 Psychotherapist, no, I’m a conceptual artist and you’re part of a “performance art” piece. 1.2975 0.04535 158 120 29 9
1192 Only three family members are allowed according to the terms of my psychotherapy Groupon 1.2975 0.04794 158 123 23 12
1193 Try not to talk over each other. 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1194 Which one of you had the fear of heights again? 1.2975 0.04623 158 121 27 10
1195 Therapy at any level is healthy. 1.2975 0.04164 158 116 37 5
1196 So tell me why you think psychology is bunk. 1.2975 0.04445 158 119 31 8
1197 This has many layers. 1.2975 0.04535 158 120 29 9
1198 The group discount only applies if you all have the same problems. 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1199 This is your last session with the three for one coupon. 1.2975 0.03966 158 116 38 4
1200 I'm glad you could all be here thanks to the new Medicare Therapy Tier Reimbursement system. 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1201 Generally, multi personalies show up in one person. 1.2975 0.04535 158 120 29 9
1202 Your insurance company felt this was the best option. 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1203 Did you order this family session on Amazon ? 1.2975 0.04445 158 119 31 8
1204 For today's group therapy, you'll be cast in the role of either eldest, middle, or youngest child. For starters, guess which one you are. 1.2975 0.04260 158 117 35 6
1205 Which one of you is the Id? Can I talk to the Id for a minute? 1.2975 0.04623 158 121 27 10
1206 Well in my defense, I did mention that I have experience diagnosing multiple personalities. 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1207 Yes, it does present some HIPAA challenges but I have tripled my caseload. 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1208 Margaret, continue. You were talking about your low self-esteem before we leap-frogged you to address Nick's narcissistic tendencies. 1.2975 0.04710 158 122 25 11
1209 Your stories brought me to tiers. 1.2975 0.04535 158 120 29 9
1210 Who told you the fee would be split 3 ways 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1211 And how does that make we feel? 1.2975 0.04445 158 119 31 8
1212 Sometimes, I don't even recognize myself. 1.2975 0.04623 158 121 27 10
1213 So…childhood sleep-away camp trauma...Who’d like to start?” 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1214 It looks like we’re out of time. Your Uber pool is waiting outside. 1.2975 0.04623 158 121 27 10
1215 No, it's nothing therapeutic, I just repurposed my kids' bunks. 1.2975 0.04535 158 120 29 9
1216 And what did you think three for the price of one meant? 1.2975 0.04260 158 117 35 6
1217 This question goes to all of you. 1.2975 0.04260 158 117 35 6
1218 This isn't what I expected when you said "triple booked." 1.2975 0.04445 158 119 31 8
1219 So, you think you are at a low point, who do you think is above you? 1.2975 0.04794 158 123 23 12
1220 Mary, let's start with you. How did UberPooling with Mike and Jayson make you feel? 1.2975 0.04878 158 124 21 13
1221 So, you say you’re hearing voices? 1.2975 0.04445 158 119 31 8
1222 Which one of you had the Groupon coupon? 1.2975 0.04960 158 125 19 14
1223 So your mothers tell me you think psychiatry is bunk... 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1224 This appears to be a rather advanced case of multiple personality disorder. 1.2975 0.04710 158 122 25 11
1225 The bunks are IKEA, so no fidgeting 1.2975 0.04535 158 119 29 9
1226 Now close your eyes and try to visualize the mortgage on my new cottage in the Hamptons. 1.2975 0.04535 158 120 29 9
1227 Number 3, how long have you had this Nearer my God to Thee feeling? 1.2975 0.04445 158 119 31 8
1228 And where do you think these concerns about confidentiality come from? 1.2975 0.04445 158 119 31 8
1229 Who else feels unimportant? 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1230 Your medical insurance won't pay for a private couch. 1.2975 0.04066 158 116 36 5
1231 I’m rethinking The whole idea of offering a Groupon For therapy. 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1232 Without universal healthcare, this is the best we do for now. 1.2975 0.04878 158 123 21 12
1233 So, starting from the top, Betty's scared of heights, Mike's claustrophobic, and Tom has a fear of gravity. 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
1234 To be honest, I'm not sure if insurance covers groupon sessions. 1.2975 0.04164 158 117 33 6
1235 It's your parent's fault. Your parent's fault. Your parent's fault... 1.2975 0.04794 158 123 23 12
1236 First, let me explain to the audience the rules for this latest Democratic Debate 2020. 1.2975 0.04445 158 119 31 8
1237 There are three people in this marriage. 1.2968 0.04593 155 118 28 9
1238 Next week Janet you can be the middle child. 1.2968 0.03902 155 111 42 2
1239 On the other hand, family therapy is not for everyone! 1.2968 0.04772 155 120 24 11
1240 All three of you share the same personality disorder. I thought it was a good time for you all to meet. 1.2968 0.04593 155 118 28 9
1241 Multiple personality disorder is a subset. Let's deal with the multiple body disorder first. 1.2965 0.04436 172 132 29 11
1242 So, Kate, Randall, and Kevin -- where would you like to begin? 1.2963 0.04189 162 120 36 6
1243 Do I need to remind you that you wanted Medicare for all? 1.2956 0.04421 159 120 31 8
1244 I hope that explains the differences in tier one, two and three health insurance. 1.2949 0.04382 156 117 32 7
1245 I think you have thoroughly misunderstood what 'ménage à trois' means. 1.2949 0.04189 156 115 36 5
1246 Well thanks for signing up for rideshare therapy, who wants to go first? 1.2949 0.04476 156 118 30 8
1247 I would love to see you individually,but your insurance says you're on the multi-tier plan. 1.2949 0.04476 156 118 30 8
1248 And most importantly, everything you tell me will be completely confidential. 1.2949 0.04382 156 117 32 7
1249 So let's start with Marty. What makes YOU the most angry about health insurance cutbacks? 1.2949 0.04657 156 120 26 10
1250 And how have rising health care costs affected you, Joe? 1.2949 0.04382 156 117 32 7
1251 What makes you think you suffer from separation anxiety? 1.2949 0.04382 156 117 32 7
1252 Of course I care about you. Why do you ask? 1.2949 0.04382 156 117 32 7
1253 Sorry, it's the new diversity rules. 1.2949 0.04567 156 119 28 9
1254 Do you think you need to set more boundaries with your parents? 1.2949 0.04657 156 120 26 10
1255 This isn't quite what I pictured when you said "group therapy." 1.2949 0.04382 156 117 32 7
1256 The good news is you’re all still covered by medicare. 1.2949 0.04476 156 118 30 8
1257 So, before we begin, let’s address the elephant in the room. Yes, the chairs are imitation leather. 1.2949 0.04831 156 122 22 12
1258 Will the real schizophrenic please stand up... 1.2941 0.04238 153 113 35 5
1259 Repeat after me, Triskaphobia is imaginary. 1.2941 0.04718 153 118 25 10
1260 Okay, let's begin. Number 3, you are lying at the bottom under Number 1 and 2. How does that make you feel? 1.2941 0.04626 153 117 27 9
1261 I'm sorry but our private equity investors insist. 1.2941 0.04984 153 121 19 13
1262 With whom shall we start? 1.2941 0.04897 153 120 21 12
1263 Doc, I just have this feeling that everyone else is beneath me. 1.2941 0.04436 153 115 31 7
1264 With the political season underway, this is the only way I can squeeze everyone in. 1.2941 0.04532 153 116 29 8
1265 In these sessions, we'll try to confront James' fear of meeting only low expectations; Arnold's middle child syndrome; and Sarah's acrophobia. 1.2941 0.04532 153 116 29 8
1266 Normally I resist the diagnosis of multiple personality disorder. 1.2922 0.03901 154 111 41 2
1267 C'mon, how do you two feel about her being on top? 1.2917 0.04167 168 126 35 7
1268 Because the first born is always held to a higher standard. 1.2914 0.04264 151 112 34 5
1269 And why do you think you have middle child syndrome? 1.2914 0.04845 151 118 22 11
1270 So, let's talk about codependency 1.2914 0.04366 151 113 32 6
1271 Before starting, can I see all your Groupon vouchers please? 1.2914 0.04564 151 115 28 8
1272 Okay, so which one of you is the middle child? 1.2914 0.04264 151 111 34 5
1273 Okay, everyone's Groupon checks out. Let's begin. 1.2914 0.04366 151 113 32 6
1274 So you say your problems feel like they are piling up on you... 1.2914 0.04660 151 116 26 9
1275 Next time read the fine print on the Groupon. 1.2914 0.04660 151 116 26 9
1276 This is Medicare-for-all psychoanalysis 1.2914 0.04366 151 113 32 6
1277 Welcome to your family therapy session. 1.2914 0.05112 151 121 16 13
1278 Singular Personality Disorder: When multiple people hear the same voice in their heads. 1.2914 0.04366 151 113 32 6
1279 Under the Bernie Plan, you will appreciate enormous savings for your individualized therapy. 1.2914 0.04660 151 116 26 9
1280 My bad, says here, scared of heights, being crushed, and oh dear. 1.2914 0.04753 151 117 24 10
1281 that is not what we mean as a "threesome" 1.2886 0.04290 149 111 33 5
1282 So Doris, I see you're a bed wetter. 1.2886 0.04694 149 115 25 9
1283 As you can see, I do exclusively thruples therapy. 1.2886 0.04395 149 112 31 6
1284 That's our new service for therapy addicts planning to quit. 1.2886 0.04694 149 115 25 9
1285 Have you thought that you might be putting others above yourself? 1.2886 0.04290 149 111 33 5
1286 So Debbie, you’ll be our judgmental super ego, Brad will play the poor pushed around ego, and Bobby, you’ll be the filthy little Id, won’t you? 1.2886 0.04290 149 111 33 5
1287 I love Groupon 1.2886 0.05066 149 119 17 12
1288 So when did you first discover that you weren't triplets? 1.2886 0.04497 149 113 29 7
1289 In order to be eligible for the discounted rate you must all pretend to have the same problem. 1.2886 0.04596 149 114 27 8
1290 You’ll all get a chance to be the middle child 1.2886 0.04073 149 109 37 3
1291 None of your policies cover individual therapy. 1.2886 0.04596 149 114 27 8
1292 How would you describe these monsters under you bed? 1.2886 0.04290 149 111 33 5
1293 Groupon, right? 1.2886 0.04290 149 111 33 5
1294 Person in the lower bunk, do you have similar feelings? 1.2886 0.04975 149 118 19 12
1295 Anything you share today is covered by patient-patient-patient-doctor confidentiality. 1.2886 0.04290 149 111 33 5
1296 No, this is what I meant when I asked would you like to do a threesome? 1.2886 0.04694 149 115 25 9
1297 OK, let's start at the top and work our way to the root of the matter. 1.2886 0.04596 149 114 27 8
1298 What did you expect when you used a groupon? 1.2886 0.04290 149 111 33 5
1299 Ok Millennials. 1.2886 0.04596 149 114 27 8
1300 It was hard enough with just couples counseling but I think this should work for a love triangle 1.2886 0.04395 149 112 31 6
1301 Most people don't bring their parents... 1.2886 0.04395 149 112 31 6
1302 OK, Jim, you can have the top couch next time. 1.2886 0.04497 149 113 29 7
1303 Let's keep the questions multiple choice. 1.2877 0.04657 146 112 26 8
1304 So, what I think I’m hearing you say is that you are not yet ready to move out of your parents’ basements? 1.2877 0.04657 146 112 26 8
1305 Ted, you feel smothered by your siblings... tell me more about that. 1.2877 0.04342 146 109 32 5
1306 And which personality actually pulled the trigger? 1.2877 0.05139 146 117 16 13
1307 I hate this new Trumpcare! 1.2877 0.04555 146 111 28 7
1308 Well, the good news is you don't have multiple personality disorder. 1.2877 0.04342 146 109 32 5
1309 Group Personal Therapy 1.2874 0.03993 167 124 38 5
1310 So how does that make you feel? make you feel? make you feel? 1.2857 0.04630 147 113 26 8
1311 I am sorry to say starting next week the upper and lower couches will have a twenty five dollar supplemental fee. 1.2857 0.04424 147 111 30 6
1312 What did a three for one special mean to you? 1.2857 0.04424 147 111 29 6
1313 Which one of you has the middle child syndrome? 1.2857 0.04528 147 112 28 7
1314 "Come on, guys, one more personality and we've got the record." 1.2857 0.04630 147 113 26 8
1315 When after your trip to Tokyo did you start to feel this way? 1.2857 0.04424 147 111 30 6
1316 Welcome to socialized medicine! 1.2857 0.04528 147 112 28 7
1317 Those of you who think it’s your mother’s fault, raise your hand. 1.2857 0.04424 147 111 29 6
1318 Medicare for all is not what it was cracked up to be 1.2857 0.04424 147 111 30 6
1319 Yes, I'm sensing some co-dependency. 1.2857 0.04208 147 109 34 4
1320 Looking pregnant and being pregnant have very different psychological implications. 1.2857 0.04729 147 114 24 9
1321 So Donald, what did you eat for dinner last night? 1.2857 0.05016 147 117 18 12
1322 How long have you been a throuple?" 1.2857 0.04317 147 110 32 5
1323 Before we get started, let me explain what we know about multiple personality. 1.2857 0.04424 147 111 30 6
1324 People, let’s focus on what you actually LIKE about living in a dorm in your 40s 1.2857 0.04827 147 115 22 10
1325 It is important to remember that you’re not alone in your bunk bed addiction 1.2857 0.05016 147 117 18 12
1326 Tell me again about these repressed memories of summer camp. 1.2857 0.04528 147 112 28 7
1327 Billy, what if you could tell your parents what you just told me? Well I've got a surprise for you! 1.2857 0.04729 147 114 24 9
1328 Yes, Vernon, our office's scheduling site is broken...how does that make you feel? 1.2857 0.04630 147 113 26 8
1329 Were you college room-mates? 1.2857 0.04317 147 110 32 5
1330 Be sure to give the receptionist your groupon voucher when you leave. 1.2857 0.04528 147 112 28 7
1331 Life is not a level playing field. That will be $100, $50 and $20. 1.2857 0.04317 168 129 30 9
1332 Now starting from the top could you say your first name, your age, why you are here and the name of your insurance company? 1.2847 0.04480 144 109 29 6
1333 Now, which of you is here to discuss your boundary issues? 1.2846 0.04534 130 97 29 4
1334 And why is it you don't feel special? 1.2838 0.04701 148 115 24 9
1335 Okay, now tell me about his childhood. 1.2838 0.04501 148 113 28 7
1336 Ok, Miss Top Bunk, how long have you had this feeling that you aren't being considered as a strong and independent individual by your peers at work ? 1.2838 0.05077 148 119 16 13
1337 Have you considered some alone time? 1.2837 0.04190 141 104 34 3
1338 Tell me about your mother. Tell me about your mother. Tell me about your mother. 1.2828 0.04663 145 112 25 8
1339 The sharing economy has entered therapy 1.2828 0.04559 145 111 27 7
1340 And why do you think Goldilocks would choose your couch? 1.2828 0.04663 145 112 25 8
1341 So how did leaving Camp Winnie Tonga make you feel? 1.2828 0.04118 145 107 35 3
1342 you have been reclassified as dysbunktional 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1343 Now close your eyes and imagine you can afford a one on one session. 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1344 Now this will only work if we combine all your deductibles.. 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1345 This is the first psychiatry triple-play outside of a ball park, so who's on first 1.2828 0.04663 145 112 25 8
1346 Though the others may hear you, I am the only one listening. 1.2828 0.04453 145 109 29 6
1347 I understand, but it is the best way to handle the scheduling conflict. 1.2828 0.04344 145 109 31 5
1348 The folding chairs should be back from the shop next week. 1.2828 0.04864 145 114 21 10
1349 I want to schedule another session on Friday the 13th. Your thoughts? 1.2828 0.04864 145 114 21 10
1350 Which one of you farted? 1.2828 0.04663 145 112 25 8
1351 Kate, I'll put the ladder back once you really explore your anger towards the rest of your clique. 1.2828 0.04559 145 111 27 7
1352 Picture yourself in an office with only one chaise longue 1.2828 0.04233 145 108 33 4
1353 The situation you are facing is multilayered and complex. 1.2828 0.04559 145 111 27 7
1354 So...This is Us? 1.2828 0.04559 145 111 27 7
1355 Remember, the three-for-one coupon is only good for one session. 1.2828 0.04344 145 109 31 5
1356 It's more efficient, I charge each of you a bit less, and you all have Mommy problems. 1.2828 0.05151 145 117 15 13
1357 Welcome to your student loan anxiety session. Shall we take it from the top down? 1.2828 0.04663 145 112 25 8
1358 Does anyone have the family coupon? 1.2828 0.04962 145 115 19 11
1359 Classic Middle Child Syndrome. 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1360 Think of it as Uber ride sharing meets therapy. 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1361 This *is* the recommended treatment now for multiple personality disorder. 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1362 Is this anyone's first time in Groupon Therapy? 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1363 Sorry, number 3, are you the one on suicide watch or is that number 2? Oops, times up everyone." 1.2828 0.04765 145 115 20 10
1364 So Eve, I’m glad you’ve brought in all three faces today. 1.2828 0.04559 145 111 27 7
1365 I should tell you at the start that this is my first experiment with Groupon. 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1366 You've all qualified for the group rate. 1.2828 0.04663 145 112 25 8
1367 tell me....what is it that has brought you all to tiers? 1.2828 0.04962 145 115 19 11
1368 Good news! Your insurance will cover 36 sessions 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1369 You seem to share a sort of a bunker mentality. 1.2828 0.04559 145 111 27 7
1370 Otto never caught on that each of his three personalities was being charged separately. 1.2828 0.04765 145 113 23 9
1371 You are in a safe place now. Whatever you say will be between me and the 3 of you. 1.2828 0.04344 145 109 31 5
1372 Which one of you was a middle child? 1.2828 0.04233 145 108 33 4
1373 To be fair the ad did say I’m three times more likely to be helpful than other therapists. 1.2828 0.04559 145 110 27 7
1374 Family sessions improved a lot after I got rid of the Murphy beds. 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1375 The age of Groupon 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1376 New Federal Mental Health Guidelines give you each a 16.667 minute hour 1.2828 0.04118 145 108 32 4
1377 Here's my first insight. Get a better health insurance plan. 1.2828 0.05057 145 116 17 12
1378 You all need better HMOs. 1.2828 0.04663 145 112 25 8
1379 Lets start with how the choice-of-bunk fight started. 1.2828 0.04663 145 112 25 8
1380 So, you were telling me last time about how the sharing economy was crushing your sense of self. 1.2828 0.04663 145 112 25 8
1381 First off, I must apologize. This certainly was not what I meant when I told my secretary that all work must be submitted in triplicate. 1.2828 0.04344 145 108 30 5
1382 Bobby, tell me why you think Greg and Peter like to bully you. 1.2828 0.04765 145 113 23 9
1383 Bachelor #1, if on our first date I asked you about your mother, what would you say? 1.2828 0.04559 145 111 27 7
1384 Your inner children want better insurance. 1.2828 0.04962 145 115 19 11
1385 I hope you will feel confident that everything we discuss will be kept confidential 1.2828 0.04118 145 106 35 3
1386 Alright and that’s our time. Grace, would you like the ladder or the trampoline today? 1.2828 0.04765 145 113 23 9
1387 When did these feelings of inadequacy and depression start at Camp Sunshine for you? 1.2828 0.04453 145 110 29 6
1388 So how long have you been fixated on being in a New Yorker cartoon about psychiatrists? 1.2828 0.05057 145 116 17 12
1389 My official diagnosis is acute multiple personality disorder. 1.2828 0.04233 145 113 27 5
1390 and as a plus, Medicare helps cure loneliness 1.2828 0.04559 145 111 27 7
1391 So, I'm hearing that Ego is tired of always playing the middle man between Id and SuperEgo 1.2828 0.04765 145 113 23 9
1392 So, you have always had threesomes? 1.2828 0.04233 145 108 33 4
1393 I hope I'm not triggering any feelings of inferiority. It's just easier if I start from the top. 1.2828 0.04864 145 114 21 10
1394 How do you feel about time and space optimization? 1.2828 0.04962 145 115 19 11
1395 Well Gerald, we talked about this before, remember? Lindsey gets the top couch this time because Jeff is afraid of heights, and you had it last time. 1.2828 0.04118 145 107 35 3
1396 On the bottom is the id, the middle is the ego, then the super ego on the tippy top 1.2828 0.04559 145 111 27 7
1397 On one hand, you sold your collective souls to come up with the blandest, most benign captions imaginable, but on the other hand, you've been selected as the three Finalists.... 1.2828 0.04559 145 111 27 7
1398 Let me know if you guys want to share a Kleenex. 1.2828 0.04765 145 113 23 9
1399 My clients are really starting to pile up. 1.2826 0.04598 138 105 27 6
1400 Now try to synchronize your identical whining” 1.2826 0.05142 138 110 17 11
1401 How did you think Bernie was going to pay for it?! 1.2817 0.04934 142 112 20 10
1402 ENROLL TWO IN THERAPY, GET ONE FREE. 1.2817 0.04727 142 110 24 8
1403 This is what Medicare for all looks like , middle child /low self-esteem group 452B 1.2808 0.05120 146 118 15 13
1404 Medicare for All! 1.2808 0.05026 146 117 17 12
1405 Of course you have three different personalities. You are three different people. 1.2807 0.05063 114 87 22 5
1406 It’s a new approach to group therapy. 1.2791 0.04666 129 98 26 5
1407 No, it wasn’t “group therapy” it was Groupon. 1.2786 0.04427 140 106 29 5
1408 Any thoughts on how you stack up together? 1.2786 0.04541 140 107 27 6
1409 One more time, let’s take it from the top. 1.2786 0.04869 140 111 17 9
1410 Welcome to Basic Economy psychotherapy. 1.2786 0.04653 140 108 25 7
1411 I believe you all have separation anxiety. 1.2786 0.04762 140 109 23 8
1412 Bachelor #2, if I were your Mom, where would you take me oa a date? 1.2786 0.04869 140 110 21 9
1413 If I told you once I told you a million times: you're stuck in this co-dependent relationship because you don't respect personal boundaries, not one of you really listens to me, and after seven years as your therapist, frankly I'm sick of it. 1.2786 0.04762 140 109 23 8
1414 I understand there is a problem with your position in life. 1.2786 0.04541 140 107 27 6
1415 My three for one deal was not literal." 1.2786 0.04653 140 108 25 7
1416 OK, now that you understand the vagaries of our tiered pricing, we can proceed with the resultant level of care. 1.2786 0.04427 140 106 29 5
1417 I can see that there are levels to your grief. 1.2786 0.04188 140 104 33 3
1418 My methods are hard to debunk. 1.2786 0.04869 140 110 21 9
1419 I typically avoid group-based approaches to acute personality disorder therapy, but it was on sale at IKEA. 1.2786 0.04541 140 109 24 7
1420 I wondered why you clarified that your problems started at "birth, with an I" when I agreed to take you on as a patient. 1.2786 0.05076 140 112 17 11
1421 Please. One at a time. 1.2786 0.04309 140 105 31 4
1422 As patients, it's important to see how you stack up 1.2786 0.04869 140 110 21 9
1423 So I see we have some separation anxiety. 1.2786 0.04188 140 104 33 3
1424 Let's see how your so-called issues stack up.” 1.2786 0.04762 140 109 23 8
1425 I am starting to wonder whether this is worth doing to get the group rate. 1.2786 0.04762 140 109 23 8
1426 For that kind of guidance, Mr. Wilkins, you’d have to upgrade to first class. 1.2786 0.04653 140 108 25 7
1427 You should see this place when the cast of "Friends" shows up. 1.2786 0.04762 140 109 23 8
1428 No, I was not aware you all know each other 1.2786 0.04188 140 104 33 3
1429 Are all your private activities 3-way? 1.2786 0.04974 140 111 19 10
1430 You have a single personality disorder. 1.2786 0.04541 140 107 27 6
1431 Tell me what you're feeling. Tell me what you're feeling. Tell me what you're feeling. 1.2786 0.04869 140 110 21 9
1432 It’s not multiple personality disorder, you actually are three separate people. 1.2774 0.04717 137 106 24 7
1433 My training? Camp counselor. 1.2774 0.04238 137 102 32 3
1434 Yes, even if you remain silent throughout the session you are still responsible for 33.33% payment. 1.2774 0.04602 137 105 26 6
1435 I've noticed that trouble comes in threes. 1.2774 0.04484 137 104 28 5
1436 Simon says arms to your side. Hold your hands on your stomach. 1.2774 0.04717 137 106 24 7
1437 So you're not happy with your position in life. What would you change? 1.2774 0.04602 137 105 26 6
1438 Yes, it's a metaphor. I just haven't figured out which one. 1.2774 0.04363 137 103 30 4
1439 Multiple personality disorder is usually not so obvious. 1.2774 0.04484 137 104 28 5
1440 Do you think that on some level... 1.2774 0.04484 137 103 28 5
1441 Ugly is obvious, but which one of you identifies as the Good or the Bad? 1.2774 0.04717 137 106 24 7
1442 Even worse, your insurance company cut your hour to 41 minutes. 1.2759 0.04536 145 112 26 7
1443 So that's what, fifteen personalities in total? 1.2754 0.04456 138 105 28 5
1444 Nobody leaves until we finish debunking. 1.2754 0.04687 138 107 24 7
1445 You played the young versions of the main characters on ‘This is Us’, and now you can’t be apart? 1.2754 0.04908 138 109 20 9
1446 Don't worry, I'll still pretend your issues are unique. 1.2754 0.04908 138 109 20 9
1447 Of course this is how you do family therapy! 1.2754 0.04456 138 105 28 5
1448 I might have an idea as to why you feel caught in the middle of Sue and Carl's relationship. 1.2754 0.04335 138 104 30 4
1449 Next time, please make separate appointments for each of your personalities. 1.2754 0.04456 138 105 28 5
1450 Technically, this is “group therapy”. 1.2754 0.04212 138 103 32 3
1451 My first question to all of you - is the market place working when looking for healthcare providers?” 1.2754 0.04687 138 107 24 7
1452 It's your mom's fault. 1.2754 0.04687 138 107 24 7
1453 OK...today let's work on your tri-polar disorder 1.2754 0.04335 138 104 30 4
1454 So tell me, each of you, when did you first have this experience of being a club sandwich? 1.2754 0.04456 138 107 24 6
1455 Any other comments on that fourth-grade teacher? 1.2754 0.04799 138 108 22 8
1456 Medicare allows for a 20 minute consult. I charge by the hour. You three split the bill, ok? 1.2754 0.04212 138 103 32 3
1457 Tell me about your unresolved summer camp issues. 1.2754 0.05014 138 110 18 10
1458 Groupon is saving my practice. 1.2754 0.04687 138 107 24 7
1459 So, how do you like your Groupons? 1.2754 0.05014 138 110 18 10
1460 Indeed, triplets from three different parents do offer some challenges. 1.2754 0.04456 138 105 28 5
1461 To answer your questions: yes, no, and hmm... 1.2754 0.04573 138 106 26 6
1462 I see your family is very into sharing. 1.2754 0.05014 138 110 18 10
1463 Now you see the downside, of "Medicare for All." 1.2754 0.04687 138 107 24 7
1464 I’d like to welcome you to our new rack ‘em and stack ‘em therapy group. 1.2754 0.04573 138 106 26 6
1465 These feelings are completely normal. Just not for you, Dave. 1.2754 0.04799 138 108 22 8
1466 Family sharing only works for Spotify dad... 1.2754 0.05014 138 110 18 10
1467 The darker skin person has the least head room. Tell me how that makes you feel. 1.2754 0.04456 138 105 28 5
1468 So I hear you all have issues with sandwiches? 1.2754 0.04799 138 108 22 8
1469 For some reason none of you have responded to group therapy. 1.2754 0.04573 138 106 26 6
1470 Welcome to your inital session with the Groupon discount. 1.2754 0.04799 138 108 22 8
1471 If you could pay cash, I'd give you a regular couch. 1.2754 0.05014 138 110 18 10
1472 This isn't what I had in mind when I suggested having a threesome. 1.2754 0.04573 138 106 26 6
1473 These open marriages rarely work out. 1.2754 0.04084 138 102 34 2
1474 You all need to work on finding your own voice. 1.2754 0.04456 138 105 28 5
1475 my rate is per hour and bunk 1.2754 0.04573 138 106 26 6
1476 None of you are leaving until we get our timing right. AGAIN. Top bunk: 'Row, row, row your boat...' 1.2754 0.04687 138 107 24 7
1477 In all honesty, a ménage a trois is just never easy. 1.2754 0.04456 138 108 24 6
1478 So that very afternoon, a new psychosis was discovered. For they experience the same illusions. The new DSM: “Mirage a Trois.” 1.2754 0.04573 138 106 26 6
1479 A whole new meaning to group therapy! 1.2754 0.04456 138 105 28 5
1480 Some call it overbooking. I personally prefer 'group therapy'. 1.2754 0.04335 138 104 30 4
1481 So what is the problem in the entourage? 1.2754 0.05014 138 110 18 10
1482 It feels like all my appointments keep stacking up 1.2754 0.04908 138 109 20 9
1483 Therapy-share isn't for everyone, but I do try to match up psychoses. 1.2754 0.04573 138 106 26 6
1484 Before we begin, which one of you has the three-for-one coupon? 1.2754 0.04573 138 106 26 6
1485 Remind me again, which one of you identifies as Shemp? 1.2754 0.04799 138 108 22 8
1486 You may like our triple threat package: acrophobia, enochlophobia and claustrophobia. I'll throw in hypochondria for free. 1.2727 0.04821 132 103 22 7
1487 Maybe you should try sleeping together. 1.2727 0.04699 132 102 24 6
1488 He doesnt really need the helmet at that altitude 1.2721 0.05056 136 109 17 10
1489 So, Helen, have you always felt superior being on top? 1.2721 0.04362 136 105 23 6
1490 First off, I'd like to welcome you all to your first Groupon polyamorous three-for-one discount session. 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 6
1491 Clients,just a reminder: as we test out this innovative pilot for saving health care delivery costs,please try not to free-associate all at one time." 1.2721 0.04947 136 108 19 9
1492 We'll start with fear of heights, then fear of enclosed spaces, then fear of being last." 1.2721 0.04362 136 103 29 4
1493 Now we commence the mind-meld. 1.2721 0.04947 136 108 19 9
1494 Yes Carol, from up there everyone does seem small. 1.2721 0.05369 136 112 11 12
1495 This Medicare-for-all does take a little getting used to. 1.2721 0.04235 136 102 31 3
1496 First let me explain multiple personality syndrome ..... 1.2721 0.05056 136 109 17 9
1497 Hopefully this group therapy session will help you all get over your fear of bunk beds. 1.2721 0.04485 136 104 27 5
1498 Now again let’s hear it from the top! 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1499 Let’s begin. I have a stacked schedule this afternoon. 1.2721 0.04362 136 103 29 4
1500 How long have you had this compassion for Oreo cookies? 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1501 I'm prescribing you tricyclic antidepressants. 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1502 What we lose in confidentiality, we make up for in anonymity. 1.2721 0.04605 136 105 25 6
1503 I didn’t think this is what they meant by group therapy. 1.2721 0.04485 136 104 27 5
1504 Families in therapy are often moved to tiers. 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1505 OK, so, let me get this straight - which one of you is the third wheel? 1.2721 0.04362 136 103 29 4
1506 You may be a family who needs intervention, but you do not get a 3 for 1 discount . . . 1.2721 0.04362 136 103 29 4
1507 When did you first experience these feelings toward Groupon? 1.2721 0.04605 136 105 25 6
1508 Healthcare under Bernie. 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1509 And when, exactly, did you become aware that you might have multiple personalities? 1.2721 0.04171 136 103 28 4
1510 How long have you lived in your tiny house? 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1511 No , I'm afraid there is no discount for Multiple Personality Disorder. 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1512 Remember, only 1/3 of my advice applies to you. 1 1.2721 0.04362 136 103 29 4
1513 So this is Medicare for all! 1.2721 0.04947 136 108 19 9
1514 Group rates don't cover individual phobias 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1515 First the bad news, you are not triplets. 1.2721 0.04235 136 102 31 3
1516 So, nobody wants to be Id today? 1.2721 0.04485 136 104 27 5
1517 Sorry, I am backed up today. But at least you know you are not alone. 1.2721 0.04485 136 104 27 5
1518 I can see that you’re dealing with stress on multiple levels. 1.2721 0.04485 136 104 27 5
1519 Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, okay Fred, you’re turn. 1.2721 0.05056 136 109 17 10
1520 Trickle down therapy. 1.2721 0.04605 136 105 25 6
1521 It’s understandable, especially confronting long repressed summer camp fears. 1.2721 0.04947 136 108 19 9
1522 Okay, let's start with the resentment you're feeling over who got the bottom bunk. 1.2721 0.04235 136 102 31 3
1523 You've been away from your cell phones for over 10 minutes now...how's everyone feeling?" 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1524 Welcome to your Buy Two, Get One Free Groupon Therapy Session. 1.2721 0.04605 136 105 25 6
1525 I've seen this before, I call it the "Larry, Curly & Moe" Syndrome. 1.2721 0.05056 136 109 17 10
1526 So...let's talk about camp. 1.2721 0.04947 136 108 19 9
1527 What else bothers you about low Medicare reimbursements? 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1528 Karen, I need you to be more supportive. 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1529 Thank you for participating in our group therapy pilot study. Please discuss how you feel about your mothers among yourselves. 1.2721 0.05056 136 109 17 10
1530 It gets busy during an election year. 1.2721 0.04947 136 108 19 9
1531 So with the group rate, you all speak at the same time and I'll listen to the person with the most interesting issues. 1.2721 0.04485 136 104 27 5
1532 Welcome to 'Medicare for all'. You each have 30 seconds to describe your symptoms. 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1533 Groupon Group therapy 1.2721 0.04362 136 103 29 4
1534 Have you ever thought life might be stacked against you? 1.2721 0.04605 136 105 25 6
1535 Maslow's Hierarchy doesn't work like this and I hope I've made it clear you're each being charged individually." 1.2721 0.04362 136 103 28 4
1536 No, for the last time, we do not offer a group discount. 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1537 Just because you're on top, Id, doesn't mean you have to keep trashing Ego and Superego. 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1538 Again, to be clear, no separate checks. 1.2721 0.04605 136 105 25 6
1539 Okay -- what level did we leave off on last week? 1.2721 0.04235 136 102 31 3
1540 To summarize, Jane, you are experiencing feelings of being on top of the world, Ken, you have anxiety about not being able to break out from the middle of the pack and Tom, you can't seem to shake the feeling of always ending up on the bottom rung? 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1541 From here on out, I'm going to do all the talking. 1.2721 0.04947 136 108 19 9
1542 This time watch your b flats. 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1543 Yes, there is a someone between you two. 1.2721 0.04235 136 102 31 3
1544 Welcome to the beta test of the new Therapy Share app. 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1545 I find this therapy works best for patients in parallel universes. 1.2721 0.04947 136 108 19 9
1546 I understand that being Mr. Trump’s aide can break your psyche, but not like this. 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1547 No, you're not the only one who feels this way. 1.2721 0.04235 136 102 31 3
1548 When did you first hear about high-rise syndrome? 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1549 Wow! This runs deep. Let's start at the top and work our way down. 1.2721 0.04605 136 105 25 6
1550 Christie, Paul, Bill, you wanted the discount rate, so pay attention and learn from each other. 1.2721 0.04605 136 105 25 6
1551 Let's not all talk at once. 1.2721 0.04235 136 103 23 4
1552 We're now streamlining all of the cartoons featuring psychiatrists' offices. 1.2721 0.05369 136 112 11 13
1553 Yes, " I guess you could liken it to musical chairs". 1.2721 0.04485 136 104 27 5
1554 Please explain why you feel your ménage à trois needs to join Co-Dependency Anonymous? 1.2721 0.05267 136 111 13 12
1555 So then, going from top to bottom: don’t be afraid of heights, stop feeling so boxed in, and your outlook won’t always be this low. 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1556 Believe it or not, you're not alone in feeling that way. 1.2721 0.04722 136 106 23 7
1557 So to recap, I've got one superiority complex, one inferiority complex and you in the middle suffering from both? 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1558 You've all opted for the group rate. How does that make you feel? 1.2721 0.04605 136 105 25 6
1559 Who's gonna level with me? 1.2714 0.04161 140 105 32 3
1560 Let's see. Last week we left off with Alice telling Elijah that she's carrying his baby and Elijah saying that he's still in love with Jack, but Jack said he's moving to Miami with Ramona, who gets out of prison next month. Who'd like to go first? 1.2707 0.04668 133 103 24 6
1561 Raise your hand if you agree that the Groupon fine print agreement was another in a long history of betrayals? 1.2707 0.04544 133 102 26 5
1562 Perhaps you’re right. Try it with the acrophobic on the bottom and the claustrophobic up top. 1.2703 0.04351 148 114 28 6
1563 I’m Dr. Smith and I’ll be your summer camp counselor. 1.2701 0.04457 137 105 27 5
1564 Although middle patients often feel they receive less attention, I try my best to charge you all equally. 1.2701 0.04804 137 108 21 8
1565 Hey, no more grousing about Medicare for All, okay? 1.2701 0.04457 137 105 27 5
1566 So who was the one with gender reassignment issues? 1.2701 0.04457 137 108 21 6
1567 Okay, you guys start by babbling about your respective childhoods and at the end of the hour the fee is split three ways. 1.2701 0.04576 137 106 25 6
1568 And how do you feel about that? Anyone can answer. 1.2692 0.04055 130 96 33 1
1569 Your issue has different levels. 1.2679 0.04909 112 86 22 4
1570 This is my first counseling all members of a menage a trois arrangement. 1.2672 0.05290 131 107 13 11
1571 So after 'Need You Now' reached number 1, you must have been lot of pressure to write a follow-up. I'd like to explore how that made you feel... 1.2672 0.04945 131 104 19 8
1572 Sorry but we had to make some adjustment because of new provisions in your healthcare plan. 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1573 You all need your heads examined if you think I'm billing this for a single person visit. 1.2672 0.04825 131 103 21 7
1574 It sounds like you feel you’re not getting enough personal attention. 1.2672 0.04702 131 102 23 6
1575 Tell me why you're feeling stuck in the middle. 1.2672 0.04445 131 100 27 4
1576 "We've heard enough from you now, Id. Superego, can we check in with you? 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1577 So, whose idea was it to have the threesome? 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1578 Ok, so let’s take it from the top. 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1579 And who are we today? 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1580 Mr. Middleman, why do you always choose the second bunk? 1.2672 0.04311 131 98 29 2
1581 Again, now: what part of family therapy are you all having a problem with? 1.2672 0.04445 131 100 27 4
1582 This isn't what I expected when she recommended group therapy. 1.2672 0.04702 131 102 23 6
1583 I'm only asking you to tri it just this once. 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1584 I am pleased to announce that today's session is made possible by the Ikea Group Therapy Stacking Initiative. 1.2672 0.04702 131 102 23 6
1585 Socialization 2020 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1586 I have many patients but know I'm focusing on you individually. 1.2672 0.04445 131 100 27 4
1587 How was your train trip through Europe? 1.2672 0.04702 131 102 23 6
1588 You're all nuts. 1.2672 0.04702 131 102 23 6
1589 Yes, I am in this for the money. 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1590 Well, there is actually one monster above your bed too. We can make them go away, but that will then be $300 per hour. 1.2672 0.04445 131 100 27 4
1591 Because I deal with the collective unconscious. 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1592 Welcome to Trump Anxiety Daycamp, the therapy session began when i removed the stepladder". 1.2672 0.04311 131 101 26 4
1593 Suffice it to say, the current administration has led to an increase in anxiety. 1.2672 0.04825 131 103 21 7
1594 Now I see what you meant by "hover parents" 1.2672 0.04445 131 102 24 4
1595 Let’s start by debunking some psychotherapy tropes... 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1596 Why do you feel like you aren't getting enough attention? 1.2672 0.04702 131 102 23 6
1597 Remind me, which of you has middle child syndrome? 1.2672 0.04445 131 100 27 4
1598 You may have slept your way to the top, Catherine, but you’re going to have to get down with self-love. 1.2672 0.05063 131 105 17 9
1599 It was clearly stated - 'No split bills' 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1600 One at a time ! 1.2672 0.04445 131 105 21 4
1601 Why the bunk sofa? It's called group therapy, and if I hear my mom was so mean, one more time I'm gonna shoot myself. 1.2672 0.04702 131 102 23 6
1602 Acrophobia, claustrophobia, and Glenn, I'll see you next Tuesday. 1.2672 0.04445 131 100 27 4
1603 For anonymity's sake, I'm going to call you Acro, Claustro, and Agora. 1.2672 0.05399 131 108 11 12
1604 On the bright side, you're not so alone that you couldn't use the Groupon. 1.2672 0.04702 131 102 23 6
1605 I, too, am worried the FRIENDS reboot won’t stack up, but let’s be reasonable here... 1.2672 0.05177 131 106 15 10
1606 First, please remember that many throuples find therapy helpful. 1.2672 0.04575 131 101 25 5
1607 HMO-sponsored studies prove it's very effective. 1.2667 0.04929 105 80 22 3
1608 This insurance clause is new to me too. 1.2656 0.04503 128 98 26 4
1609 I am now allowed only 15 inches between patients. 1.2656 0.04638 128 99 24 5
1610 Simon says cross your legs”. 1.2656 0.04638 128 99 24 5
1611 Welcome to "Medical Care for All" 1.2656 0.04896 128 101 20 7
1612 OK. We got you off of the cruise ship. you're no longer in quarantine. What is keeping you in your bunks? 1.2656 0.04896 128 101 20 7
1613 I find it more efficient to analyze all your alter egos at the same time. 1.2656 0.04769 128 100 22 6
1614 I think we'll need to get your mother in here. 1.2656 0.04638 128 99 24 5
1615 I'd like you to speak with one voice. 1.2656 0.04503 128 98 26 4
1616 Now close your eyes, and imagine that your HMO had better coverage. 1.2656 0.04638 128 99 24 5
1617 - How are we doing today? 1.2656 0.04638 128 99 24 5
1618 I'm here to help you with the transition from incarceration to normal life. 1.2656 0.04365 128 97 28 3
1619 Well, that concludes your carpool therapy session. 1.2656 0.04365 128 97 28 3
1620 Let's start at the beginning, tell me about the Uber Pool... 1.2656 0.04503 128 98 26 4
1621 Since you have multiple personalities, I’ll have to bill each separately. 1.2656 0.04503 128 98 26 4
1622 When I ask a question the first person to raise their hand gets to answer first. There will be no more talking at the same time. Is that understood. Now, what seems to be the problem? 1.2656 0.04769 128 99 22 6
1623 Agoraphobic, please switch bunks with Fear of Heights. 1.2656 0.04769 128 100 22 6
1624 My "Short Stack" therapy concept came to me as an undergrad working at I-Hop. 1.2652 0.04670 132 103 23 6
1625 Does being stuck in the middle bring up any feelings? 1.2640 0.05223 125 101 15 9
1626 tell your inner child,no jumping on the bunk bed 1.2636 0.04194 129 100 22 4
1627 Ok, let’s see if I can “debunk” these problems. 1.2636 0.04736 129 101 22 6
1628 Now some people aren't as comfortable with group therapy, but the research shows it's quite effective. 1.2636 0.04607 129 100 24 5
1629 My Financial Planner told me it was a good way to increase my hourly rate." 1.2636 0.04862 129 102 20 7
1630 OK, let's take it from the top. 1.2636 0.04736 129 101 22 6
1631 Groupon therapy. 1.2636 0.04862 129 102 20 7
1632 Now, let’s not all talk at once 1.2636 0.04736 129 101 22 6
1633 Primarily, I feel we must address the unusual verticality of your family system... 1.2636 0.04985 129 103 18 8
1634 I think that you are in denial about trying to sleep your way to the top.” 1.2636 0.05105 129 104 16 9
1635 How do you feel about group psychotherapy as a form of after-school detention? 1.2636 0.04736 129 101 22 6
1636 Why label it a bizarre love triangle? Maybe it’s a garden-variety love triangle. 1.2636 0.04736 129 101 22 6
1637 When did you first notice you were missing a fourth for bridge? 1.2636 0.04607 129 100 24 5
1638 It would be a lot more fun if you could complain about your parents in three part harmony. 1.2636 0.05105 129 104 16 9
1639 Your first problem? You gave the kid the bottom bunk. 1.2636 0.04473 129 99 26 4
1640 And remember: when counseling Economy Class, each piece of personal baggage is an additional $40. 1.2636 0.04985 129 103 18 8
1641 It all started at summer camp... 1.2636 0.04985 129 103 18 8
1642 Which one of you is afraid of heights? 1.2636 0.04336 129 98 28 3
1643 Tell me more about your father’s Groupon compulsion. 1.2636 0.05450 129 107 10 12
1644 Do you feel you can now change the light bulb, Lisa? 1.2636 0.04473 129 99 26 4
1645 So - band camp traumas. Let's explore that. 1.2636 0.04736 129 101 22 6
1646 #1 ... what is the problem from your viewpoint? 1.2636 0.04336 129 98 28 3
1647 Brings new meaning to Group Therapy! 1.2636 0.05337 129 106 12 11
1648 We shared an Uber too. 1.2636 0.04862 129 102 20 7
1649 I got the idea after staying at an Air BNB. 1.2636 0.04607 129 100 24 5
1650 Well I see your multiple personality disorder has progressed since last visit. 1.2636 0.04336 129 98 28 3
1651 So, welcome to our first "Mental Health for All" session. 1.2636 0.04862 129 102 19 7
1652 So, which one of you is the evil triplet? 1.2628 0.04428 137 106 26 5
1653 Your Uber Pool ride is here now - see you next time. 1.2628 0.04306 137 105 28 4
1654 I want to help you lead a more dormal life. 1.2619 0.04805 126 99 21 6
1655 I need you to hear me. Friends accepted by different colleges are not the same as triplets separated at birth. 1.2619 0.04390 126 96 27 3
1656 So you think there are people above and below you? 1.2615 0.04443 130 102 23 5
1657 You exhibit multiple personalities in disorder - not a multiple personality disorder. 1.2615 0.04443 130 100 26 4
1658 Let's talk about your fear of being alone. 1.2602 0.04876 123 97 20 6
1659 I see we have multiple personalities. 1.2598 0.04900 127 101 19 7
1660 Let me bring in a couple of colleagues. 1.2583 0.04807 120 94 21 5
1661 It’s OK, my background is in multiple personalities. 1.2583 0.05090 120 96 17 7
1662 And how does that make you, and you, and you feel? 1.2583 0.04659 120 93 23 4
1663 Did we really need this maze now that we have flying rats. scientist2: damn right 1.2581 0.05105 124 100 16 8
1664 I know you think this a lot of bunk. 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1665 None of you read the Groupon fine print? 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1666 You seem to have problems on so many levels! 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1667 So is this a trio, a troika, or a menage a trois? 1.2581 0.04974 124 99 18 7
1668 And with time you may come to joyful acceptance that a menage a quatre was truly an overly aspirational goal... 1.2581 0.05476 124 103 10 11
1669 I think you meant to order a Therapist X. This is Therapist Pool. 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1670 How about we start at the top . 1.2581 0.04265 124 94 28 2
1671 Welcome to Uber Therapy Share. 1.2581 0.04974 124 98 18 7
1672 Progress! We've got you down to three distinct personalities. 1.2581 0.04265 124 94 28 2
1673 The Groupon didn’t specify individual therapy, only 50 minutes with a licensed therapist. 1.2581 0.04841 124 98 20 6
1674 So, when did you begin to feel you weren’t special? 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1675 You know I'm still going to charge you all full price, right? 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1676 Fine! I get three people with one personality. 1.2581 0.04974 124 99 18 7
1677 Two in three people feel they're beneath someone. 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1678 Yada, yada, yada. 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1679 Keep in mind that you’re each saving 33 per cent on this session dealing with your miserliness. 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1680 Why can't we ever just come over mom? 1.2581 0.04416 124 95 26 3
1681 How did you hear about about the Groupon? 1.2581 0.04265 124 94 28 2
1682 It looks like you have reached the tipping point. 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 23 4
1683 It’s only the primary, and yet, we’re so distressed. 1.2581 0.04841 124 98 20 6
1684 Just a reminder, calling shotgun next session will not guarantee you the top bunk. 1.2581 0.04841 124 98 20 6
1685 I didn't mean health care for all at the same time. 1.2581 0.04974 124 99 18 7
1686 Volume is the only way to make it pay these days. 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1687 I've made my practice scalable to handle increased market demands since the 2016 election. 1.2581 0.04265 124 94 28 2
1688 Patient number three, describe your best therapy session. 1.2581 0.04974 124 99 18 7
1689 Obviously, we aren’t seeing eye to eye on any of these issues. 1.2581 0.04416 124 95 26 3
1690 Shared ride chaining allows us to use the open seats in the car to their full advantage. As a passenger, you may be paired with multiple riders along your route. 1.2581 0.05476 124 103 10 11
1691 So, who’d like to go first and explain to me exactly what happened on that train-couchette in France last summer? 1.2581 0.05105 124 100 16 8
1692 That’s a bunch of bunk. 1.2581 0.04265 124 94 28 2
1693 It was definitely the full moon syndrome kicking in. 1.2581 0.05231 124 101 14 9
1694 Middle berth, your 15 minutes are up. Top berth, your time starts now. 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1695 Thanks for using our group deals for this week's therapy session 1.2581 0.05355 124 102 12 10
1696 For the last time, the discount does NOT apply if you continue to talk amongst yourselves! 1.2581 0.05105 124 100 16 8
1697 You have to not stack up your problems. Take them one by one. 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1698 I feel that I have low self-esteem because there is always someone above me. 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1699 Overbooked!! 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1700 So, tell me more about your favorite sibling. 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1701 Level two, why do you feel that people don't give you the undivided attention you deserve? 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1702 Before we start, can i see your coupon, please? 1.2581 0.04974 124 99 18 7
1703 ..and the cutbacks in your mental health coverage: how do they make you feel? 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1704 Welcome to your first session of Psych-sharing. As we discussed, each of you gets one-third of the hour. Ms. Top Bunk, you go first. 1.2581 0.05105 124 100 16 8
1705 Why do you always fixate on how you stack up? 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1706 Patient number one: Why would I laugh more in our sessions than I would with patients number two and three? 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1707 So what makes you think you have a split personality? 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1708 I see you folks signed up to save money through the group plan... 1.2581 0.04562 124 95 24 4
1709 Welcome to throuples therapy. To begin...is there someone else we should know about? 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1710 This is what you get with medicare for all. 1.2581 0.04974 124 99 18 7
1711 Let's ramp up from cynic to manic to panic. 1.2581 0.05105 124 100 16 8
1712 Now that rent in this building is so high, I have switched to triple bookings. 1.2581 0.04841 124 98 20 6
1713 Well, now as your analyst I'm wondering what it says that you all misunderstood the "Three for One" offer? 1.2581 0.04974 124 99 18 7
1714 Now tell me again how the three of you met? 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1715 There's a lot to debunk in this relationship. 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1716 Remember your individual experiences are unique 1.2581 0.04841 124 98 20 6
1717 Under the terms of the discount, each of you will be getting the same advice. 1.2581 0.04974 124 99 18 7
1718 I see that we're making some progress on your multiple personality disorder. You're down to three. 1.2581 0.04841 124 98 20 6
1719 I don’t think this partnership with ‘Lyft Shared’ is going to work 1.2581 0.05105 124 100 16 8
1720 Superego can go first followed by ego and then Id. 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1721 How can I help you debunk that assumption? 1.2581 0.04704 124 96 22 5
1722 Hi, the internet is bad for your mental health. Now send in the next batch. 1.2581 0.04841 124 98 20 6
1723 How long have you felt that you weren't getting enough attention? 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1724 What did you think a 3 for 1 session mean't? 1.2581 0.04841 124 98 20 6
1725 Okay, Id and Ego, how do you feel about what Superego just said? 1.2581 0.04416 124 95 26 3
1726 Whoever said that is in big trouble. 1.2581 0.04974 124 99 18 7
1727 So, how do you feel about being the middle child? 1.2581 0.04416 124 98 22 4
1728 I think triple billing is approximate in this case. 1.2581 0.04974 124 99 18 7
1729 It’s now mandated by your health insurance, sorry. 1.2581 0.04562 124 96 24 4
1730 When did you start fantasizing about Snap, Crackle and Pop? 1.2581 0.04841 124 98 20 6
1731 Ok - So that proves it - The middle child gets no attention 1.2581 0.04704 124 97 22 5
1732 So let’s go over your stories once again - from the top! 1.2581 0.04841 124 98 20 6
1733 'On the count of three, switch!' 1.2562 0.04914 121 96 19 6
1734 So the three of you think you might have multiple personality disorder? 1.2560 0.04806 125 99 20 6
1735 And what makes you think you're not triplets? 1.2560 0.04670 125 98 22 5
1736 First, I’d like to welcome you to my IKEA office location 1.2560 0.04670 125 98 22 5
1737 Yes, we call that a triple-decker diagnoses It’s when you and your friends suffer from the same symptoms. 1.2560 0.05068 125 101 16 8
1738 So what I’m hearing is your anxiety trigger is ride sharing. 1.2560 0.04530 125 97 24 4
1739 Tell me more about your obsession with club sandwiches. 1.2560 0.04530 125 97 24 4
1740 Well frankly, I also think your approach has been debunked. 1.2560 0.05068 125 101 16 8
1741 You weren't kidding about your multiple personalities... 1.2542 0.04990 118 94 18 6
1742 Could you remind me which one of you said to call this couples counseling? 1.2542 0.04533 118 91 24 3
1743 To whom it may concern 1.2541 0.04286 122 97 21 4
1744 Welcome to our first session of Group Therapy for Multiple Personalities 1.2541 0.04737 122 96 20 5
1745 You're the one's that wanted to let the horse live in your bedroom! 1.2541 0.04442 122 94 25 3
1746 Therapist: Chad, Karen from HR and James from accounting have expressed resentment with how casually you and your colleagues in the IT department are allowed to dress. 1.2521 0.05232 119 97 14 8
1747 What do you think has come between you? 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1748 Yes, I specialize in multiple personality disorders. Why do you ask? 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1749 Don’t worry—you’ll all get a chance at being the superego. 1.2521 0.05094 119 96 16 7
1750 Sometimes I think this group therapy is complete bunk. 1.2521 0.04172 119 90 28 1
1751 How did that make you- plural- feel 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1752 Before we begin, I must ask: Which one of you is the middle child? 1.2521 0.04952 119 95 18 6
1753 I think we should take a multi-layered approach here! 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1754 Tell me about the relationship dynamics here." 1.2521 0.04339 119 91 26 2
1755 Welcome to our first Tripolar group! 1.2521 0.05094 119 96 16 7
1756 Welcome to Costco Counseling. 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1757 This may take some time to debunk. 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1758 Did this traumatic childhood experience occur at summer camp, by any chance? 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1759 Your problems stem from the trauma you experienced at summer camp. 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1760 Of course you're getting the family discount rate. 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1761 Let's have Superego respond directly to Id this time. 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1762 They said that's not how group therapy works, but what do they know? 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1763 Multitasking is my issue, what’s yours? 1.2521 0.04172 119 90 28 1
1764 You have multiple personality disorder. 1.2521 0.04500 119 94 21 4
1765 So welcome to the first session of 'CPAP Exposure Therapy' in which you will learn how to tolerate being seen by someone while wearing your 'appliance.' 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1766 And although it goes against my own interests, may I say that when you start to think of yourself as a single person, my fee will reflect the breakthrough? 1.2521 0.04656 119 92 22 4
1767 So you all met on the therapist-share app, ShrinkedIn? 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1768 Welcome to group therapy in my studio office. 1.2521 0.04952 119 94 17 6
1769 I'm sorry, but there is no discount for quarantine therapy. 1.2521 0.04952 119 95 18 6
1770 Everyone’s pain is unique, yes. But bad things happen in threes. 1.2521 0.04952 119 95 18 6
1771 I can put this on three separate checks but there's a 20% service charge. 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1772 This way, you’ll all be out in 20 minutes.” 1.2521 0.04952 119 95 18 6
1773 So, how do you feel about speed therapy? 1.2521 0.04952 119 95 18 6
1774 It's a textbook middle child affliction, which I'm guessing only applies to one of you. 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1775 So you've all entered some caption contest 698 times and never made a single top 3? 1.2521 0.05094 119 96 16 7
1776 Now which of your three personalities wants to start today? 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1777 Threeapy 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1778 As per privacy rules, remember not to reveal anthing personal. 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1779 Let's debunk the causes of all these stacked-up anxieties. 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1780 When you agreed to this love triangle, you didn’t see this coming? 1.2521 0.04172 119 90 28 1
1781 I see you’ve booked a session through the couch-sharing app. 1.2521 0.04656 119 92 22 4
1782 So...it all started when she asked for a threesome? 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1783 So how do YOU feel you stack up to one another? 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1784 To have your own session,you'll need to upgrade from Economy Therapy to Business Class Therapy. 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1785 What makes you think I'm not prioritizing your needs? 1.2521 0.05232 119 97 14 8
1786 "I'd like to go a bit deeper into your experiences at summer camp." 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1787 It’s a new concept called psycho bunk bed therapy. 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1788 I’m giving you the Friends and Family Rate! 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1789 Okay, first thing, the Bargain Plan does Not mean you all talk at once. 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1790 We will now test the hypothesis that good things come in threes. 1.2521 0.04339 119 91 26 2
1791 Apart from dividing my fee three ways, it's highly unusual to include the boyfriend in your marriage counseling. 1.2521 0.04952 119 95 18 6
1792 We're taking group therapy to a new level. 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1793 Just keep thinking: 'good things come in threes'. 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1794 Don't worry, it's totally normal to come to therapy in tiers. 1.2521 0.05094 119 96 16 7
1795 I am an excellent multi-tasker. 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1796 Don't worry, unlike Bob and Phil, you're in a safe spot here. 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1797 It's not confidential, but I do make sure none of you know each other in real life." 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1798 Please tell me more about your perceived multiple personality disorder, Sybil! 1.2521 0.05094 119 96 16 7
1799 So, Janice, tell me about this need you have to rise above others. 1.2521 0.04806 119 94 20 5
1800 Statistically speaking, one of you is depressed. 1.2521 0.04500 119 92 24 3
1801 Number two, tell me more about these feelings of anonymity... 1.2521 0.04952 119 95 18 6
1802 I know this therapy is bunk. But it's cheaper. 1.2521 0.04339 119 91 26 2
1803 So, not only will you leave here with no resolution to your challenges, but you'll also have the burden of the other two's miseries 1.2521 0.05094 119 96 16 7
1804 My multiple personality patients feel more comfortable this way. 1.2521 0.04500 119 94 21 4
1805 This is the Groupon special. 1.2521 0.05094 119 96 16 7
1806 So, psychotherapy works on many levels... 1.2521 0.04656 119 93 22 4
1807 Now, raise your hand if you know why we’re all here today. 1.2521 0.05094 119 96 16 7
1808 How’s your collective unconscious? 1.2521 0.03997 119 91 27 1
1809 Now, Jenny, try explaining to Mark why you left him for Carl. Like we practiced. 1.2521 0.04952 119 95 18 6
1810 I began my career working on an assembly line. Why do you ask? 1.2520 0.04410 123 95 25 3
1811 sir in the middle you gotta lay off the kfc 1.2520 0.04703 123 97 21 5
1812 This is certainly not my idea of what group therapy is supposed to be. 1.2520 0.04703 123 97 21 5
1813 OK, superego, how do you feel about that? 1.2520 0.04559 123 96 23 4
1814 Now I want you to imagine a fourth bed. 1.2500 0.04467 120 93 24 3
1815 OK, Econo-Tuesday. Five minute blames and two minute rebuttals." 1.2500 0.04308 120 92 26 2
1816 I think now we can make real progress treating your multiple personality disorder. 1.2500 0.03969 120 90 30 0
1817 There’s a chance you’re suffering from multiple personality syndrome. 1.2500 0.04467 120 93 24 3
1818 Let's see if you can recall your childhoods now. 1.2500 0.05592 104 85 12 7
1819 You should have opted for the PPO instead of the HMO. 1.2500 0.04915 120 96 18 6
1820 So today, we’re replicating your childhood traumas of summer camp. In 29 minutes you will jump into a freezing cold lake. 1.2500 0.04308 120 92 26 2
1821 Maybe crowdfunding the session wasn’t such a good idea. 1.2500 0.04915 120 96 18 6
1822 Groupon psychotherapy session. 1.2500 0.04308 120 92 26 2
1823 I just feel that I can’t get a moment to myself anymore. 1.2500 0.05423 104 84 14 6
1824 You’’ll each still be responsible for your own co-pay 1.2500 0.04771 120 95 20 5
1825 That's the last time I'll run that three for the price of one ad 1.2500 0.05541 96 77 14 5
1826 Well, you did use a Groupon. 1.2479 0.04361 117 90 25 2
1827 I'm sorry - but the diversity discount requires either two females or two of color. 1.2479 0.04687 117 92 21 4
1828 Well, the CEO of your insurance company is concerned his income is too low. 1.2479 0.04841 117 93 19 5
1829 Your addiction concern is "Groupon" 1.2479 0.04687 117 92 21 4
1830 And Charles, please explain why today's world makes you feel like you're just another sardine in a can. 1.2479 0.04527 117 91 23 3
1831 Nice work on why they left you and why it wasn't your fault, now let's wrap up with horoscopes. 1.2479 0.04991 117 94 17 6
1832 Remind me who has the issue with bedwetting. 1.2479 0.04527 117 91 23 3
1833 Yes,Todd. Technically you are the inner child. 1.2479 0.04527 117 91 23 3
1834 Consider this Step One in overcoming your fears of the Three Stooges. 1.2479 0.04841 117 93 19 5
1835 First step is to admit there is a control issue within the family 1.2479 0.04527 117 91 23 3
1836 This week I thought we’d try a new approach to group. I came across it on the Ikea website. 1.2479 0.04841 117 93 19 5
1837 Regardless of sexual orientation, this is not what is meant by ménage à trois. 1.2479 0.04361 117 90 25 2
1838 Your company’s health insurance plan is somewhat restrictive. 1.2479 0.04189 117 89 27 1
1839 That's normal... feelings of inferiority often arise in our stratified society. 1.2479 0.04841 117 93 19 5
1840 This problem of yours is really layered. 1.2479 0.04361 117 90 25 2
1841 And how does this lack of privacy make you feel? 1.2479 0.04361 117 90 25 2
1842 Can you see the glass ceiling, Sophie? 1.2479 0.04841 117 93 19 5
1843 Multiple personality disorder typically only applies to one person 1.2479 0.04527 117 91 23 3
1844 OK, so what I'm hearing is that you all now regret supporting Medicare for all. 1.2479 0.04991 117 94 17 6
1845 Tell me what it was like not to have your own room growing up. 1.2479 0.04841 117 92 19 5
1846 Ok, First Sarah, lets address your bedwetting. 1.2479 0.04841 117 93 19 5
1847 So you feel three's a crowd? 1.2479 0.04527 117 91 23 3
1848 I'd like to thank everyone for joining our therapy pool session, we'll be charging 25% less. 1.2479 0.04361 117 90 25 2
1849 Tell me, Do you think there's a hierarchy in your relationship ? 1.2479 0.04841 117 95 16 6
1850 Henry- I know you might be a bit embarrassed that Jane asked for a psychotherapy ménage à trois session. But you are in the middle, and Jane and Timmy are now offering you a fairer rotation schedule- here and at home”. 1.2458 0.04805 118 94 19 5
1851 Let's explore that some more. Why do you think that group therapy is a lot of bunk? 1.2458 0.05097 118 96 15 7
1852 Now, which one of you said 'no one thinks I'm special'? 1.2458 0.04652 118 93 21 4
1853 Now, I know why you're here, but first let's agree on something: Not all roommates get therapy like this." 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1854 Take a breath and start at the top. 1.2456 0.04416 114 88 24 2
1855 Fear-of-heights exposure therapy must be tailored to the individual. 1.2456 0.05071 114 92 16 6
1856 How long have you been sleeping in separate beds? 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1857 We will just start from the bottom up 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1858 And you all agreed to Medicare for all? 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1859 Welcome to thruples counseling. 1.2456 0.05222 114 93 14 7
1860 Welcome to the I am an individual , group session. 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1861 So what I'm hearing is you all have been dealing with separation anxiety since the human centipede. 1.2456 0.05511 114 95 10 9
1862 If I understand correctly, your spouses feel that you are overly shelf-ish. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1863 No, Mr. Carlton - Id and superego are abstract concepts, not your close friends 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1864 Tell me again why you think the throuple isn’t working for you... 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1865 Our privacy policy insurance will guard the secrecy of your confessions. Remaining issues will be covered by no-disclosure agreements. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1866 Now which one of you is the id? 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1867 How are you feeling about President Sanders' new healthcare plan? 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1868 Welcome to my "Save a Buck" psychoanalysis plan. 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1869 If you enjoyed this ShrinkPOOL, please rate me five stars 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1870 Your copay has been discounted 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1871 Trust me, this is very effective for middle child syndrome. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1872 I'm not Bernie Sanders but he approved this plan. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1873 Welcome to throuples therapy, where three is proud, not a crowd! 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1874 Welcome to your first therapy session, Groupon customers! 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1875 Has anyone ever talked to you about multiple personality disorder? 1.2456 0.05071 114 92 16 6
1876 And when did these feelings of indignity begin for you #3? 1.2456 0.04416 114 88 24 2
1877 We've found our patients appreciate the privacy of separate beds. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1878 The coupon clearly stated ‘three sessions for the price of one’. 1.2456 0.04416 114 88 24 2
1879 So tell me, Brenda, what brings your multiple personalities in today? 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1880 Its part of our new diversity initiative. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1881 No frank, I believe that theory was debunked. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1882 Whatever you do, don’t move. 1.2456 0.04237 114 87 26 1
1883 It does appear that the odds are stacked against you. . 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1884 Well, Jerome, it sounds like a case of middle child syndrome. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1885 When did you first start watching This is Us? 1.2456 0.03853 114 89 21 2
1886 Hmm, entitlement, lack of commitment and narcissism, a veritable millennial club sandwich. 1.2456 0.05071 114 92 16 6
1887 How long have you suspected you had multiple personalities? 1.2456 0.04416 114 88 24 2
1888 However, if you do not speak in chorus, I will have to charge you individually. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1889 ...you are special and unique 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1890 Just so we're clear. It's still $75 an hour per person. 1.2456 0.05071 114 92 16 6
1891 I will bill your insurance companies separately but address you collectively as "the patient." 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1892 Honestly, I never had to do this before during an election cycle. 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1893 A ladder for your thoughts? 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1894 Well, we like to call it Medicare For All - Beta version.” 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1895 Look, you're paying for 'economy couch,' so let's just get used to it. 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1896 Who wants to begin today? The id 1.2456 0.04915 114 90 18 5
1897 Now,which of you is here for bedwetting? 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1898 I didn't know I had to do all this being the camp counselor. 1.2456 0.05222 114 93 14 7
1899 Seven more, we’ll have a minyan... 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1900 Welcome to Wheel of Misfortune, the game where players compete for the most painful memories of childhood. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1901 Just see yourself in the other. Also, I need to triple my income. 1.2456 0.05071 114 92 16 6
1902 This isn't what I expected when I saw your sign 'discount psychotherapy' 1.2456 0.04416 114 88 24 2
1903 I am usually booked 3 months ahead and you millennials are into over-sharing anyway.... 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1904 I’ll remind you again, with group rate therapy please don’t share personal information due to confidentiality rules 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1905 How is this like Uber pool? 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1906 Now which of you has a fear of heights? 1.2456 0.04049 114 86 28 0
1907 Just what makes you feel like family therapy is "bunk?" 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1908 Being the middle child can be tough. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1909 Let's begin with a group sigh. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1910 So it all began on an overnight train ride? 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1911 Let's move it along; my day is stacked. 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1912 Agnes, why do you think you have been having nightmares about traveling in steerage? 1.2456 0.04237 114 92 19 3
1913 Yes, this is where open relationships lead. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1914 This isn't exactly what I meant when I said "family discount". 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1915 On your new low cost health plan this IS individual therapy. 1.2456 0.04416 114 88 24 2
1916 Well, there's a copay for a ladder. 1.2456 0.05071 114 92 16 6
1917 So let's try debunking some of our fears. 1.2456 0.04589 114 90 19 4
1918 I graded your personality tests. Two of you showed room for improvement. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1919 If your other two multiple personalities want to come out now, I'll need higher ceilings. 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1920 I’ve really got to stop advertising on Groupon. 1.2456 0.04416 114 88 24 2
1921 Welcome to my group session, No More Tiers. . . 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1922 You are suffering from the tertiary stage of the illness 1.2456 0.04237 114 87 26 1
1923 So, tell me, Marjorie, how has being on top changed your mood? 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1924 Sorry Bill– seat change requests cannot be accommodated at the fare price you purchased. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1925 If one of you doesn’t speak up, it’ll be an awful waste of a Groupon. 1.2456 0.04237 114 89 19 3
1926 So, when did you first start feeling your personal issues were insignificant? 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1927 Time to de-bunk that stack of memories! 1.2456 0.04416 114 88 24 2
1928 Tell me again about the company's great health plan. 1.2456 0.04416 114 88 24 2
1929 I said I do COUPLES therapy. 1.2456 0.04589 114 89 22 3
1930 Yes, Bill, you can be on the top next week 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1931 Well yes, it does say 'multiple personalities,' but it doesn't say multiple people... 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1932 I can see why your ménage à trois may have failed. 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1933 " No, you don't get charged a single rate by claiming you all share one personality." 1.2456 0.04915 114 91 18 5
1934 Your separation anxieties can be interpreted on multiple levels. 1.2456 0.04416 114 88 24 2
1935 That’s just bunk! 1.2447 0.05171 94 74 17 3
1936 This way I can quickly find your underlying problems, at least for two of you. 1.2435 0.04877 115 92 18 5
1937 Paul, why do you feel that there are people keeping you from moving upward in life? 1.2435 0.04553 115 90 22 3
1938 Here at 'Cut-Rate Freud,' we analyze only a third of your psyche. 1.2435 0.04553 115 90 22 3
1939 Maybe it's time to debunk modern psychiatry 1.2435 0.04205 115 88 26 1
1940 Let’s get started. Top down OK with everyone? 1.2435 0.04205 115 88 26 1
1941 Should I send the bill to Id, Ego, or Superego? 1.2435 0.04877 115 92 18 5
1942 Interesting thoughts about pregnancy, Karen. So now it's your turn, Michael. What's this Zelig syndrome you mentioned? 1.2435 0.04205 115 88 26 1
1943 It's called the trickledown theory. 1.2435 0.04205 115 88 26 1
1944 You’re the grumpiest triplets I’ve ever encountered, and my triplets-only practice is huge. 1.2435 0.04718 115 91 20 4
1945 I’m the first to accept Groupon insurance. 1.2435 0.04205 115 88 26 1
1946 OK, let's start by saying this could be over by November. 1.2435 0.04877 115 92 18 5
1947 Same insurance, same anxiety disorder, let's begin! 1.2435 0.05031 115 93 16 6
1948 Funny you should ask. I was wondering how to fit more patients in to my schedule when The Lego Movie gave me the greatest idea! 1.2435 0.04553 115 90 22 3
1949 There's nothing Oedipal in sharing condiments. 1.2435 0.04205 115 90 21 2
1950 So exactly which one of you is the middle child? 1.2435 0.04718 115 91 20 4
1951 Trust me. This is the best way to deal with the id, ego, and superego 1.2435 0.04553 115 90 22 3
1952 If I understand correctly, you identify with Huey, you with Dewey and you with Louie. 1.2432 0.04826 111 88 19 4
1953 Okay, one at a time, who was the one that wanted to be experimental? 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1954 A split personality in what way? 1.2414 0.04992 116 94 16 6
1955 Two free with one isn’t much of a bargain if none of you talk. 1.2414 0.04682 116 92 20 4
1956 Buy one get two free: which one has insurance? 1.2414 0.04682 116 92 20 4
1957 You all have the same problem, so you all get the same treatment. 1.2414 0.04839 116 93 18 5
1958 This is known as the cutting edge IRL Trio Treatment for Social Media Addiction. 1.2414 0.05284 116 96 12 8
1959 I'm not sure this is what they meant by Medicare for all. 1.2414 0.05140 116 95 14 7
1960 Let’s share the emotional burden along with the out-of-network co-pay. 1.2414 0.04839 116 93 18 5
1961 Starting with you, Mr. Miller, why do you feel that first access to the copier is so important? 1.2414 0.04839 116 93 18 5
1962 So you mean to tell me that you all feel like you're trapped in a parallel universe? 1.2414 0.04682 116 92 20 4
1963 My rate is $240 an hour. Your insurance reimburses up to $80. No out-of-pocket for you. You're welcome. 1.2414 0.04519 116 91 22 3
1964 I don’t think parallel thinking works in therapy 1.2414 0.04350 116 89 23 2
1965 I'm still charging individually 1.2414 0.04839 116 93 18 5
1966 Let's start with your childhood. From the top. 1.2414 0.04682 116 92 20 4
1967 No Brad, your mother did not tell me to put you in the middle bunk. 1.2414 0.04350 116 90 24 2
1968 Rock, paper, Scissors to see who goes first? 1.2414 0.04839 116 93 18 5
1969 Just say present if your phobia is mention. 1.2414 0.05140 116 95 14 7
1970 Family therapy is not Groupon for individual therapy. 1.2414 0.05140 116 95 14 7
1971 When was it you began to feel that people were following you? 1.2414 0.04350 116 90 24 2
1972 Bernice: superiority complex. Adam: middle child syndrome. Mike: you're just a downer. 1.2414 0.04839 116 93 18 5
1973 Unbeknownst to our patients, we therapists have been having a little caption contest of our own. I congratulate you for making the cut for the final three. 1.2414 0.05140 116 95 14 7
1974 This may be a bit easier to clear up than the garden variety multiple personality disorder. 1.2414 0.04839 116 93 18 5
1975 You'll all be happy to know that I'm way ahead of my colleagues in both innovation and productivity. 1.2414 0.04682 116 92 20 4
1976 ‘I usually follow a top to bottom approach’ 1.2414 0.04519 116 91 22 3
1977 Sorry, everyone, but thanks to your insurance company, it was either the stacked couches or group therapy at Madison Square Garden. 1.2414 0.04839 116 93 18 5
1978 There's no premium seating, it's the same standard hourly rate for each of you. 1.2414 0.04350 116 90 24 2
1979 Top to bottom: Superego,Ego,Id 1.2414 0.04839 116 93 18 5
1980 This is the HMO plan. 1.2414 0.04519 116 91 22 3
1981 It appears you have split personality disorder. 1.2414 0.04682 116 92 20 4
1982 The accountants said I had to bump it up to a 150 minute hour. 1.2414 0.04519 116 91 22 3
1983 So your dreams about a sandwich...Do they make you feel like you're not part of the club? 1.2414 0.04992 116 94 16 6
1984 Now that I’ve psychoanalyzed all of you, I choose bachelor number two. 1.2414 0.05140 116 95 14 7
1985 Thank you for accepting my therapy Groupon offer. Let’s begin with your feelings about summer camp... 1.2414 0.04350 116 90 24 2
1986 Let's see: two's a company; three is a crowd. Which of you is in bad company? 1.2414 0.04992 116 94 16 6
1987 Patient number one for $500... 1.2414 0.04682 116 92 20 4
1988 Eeny mini miny mo. State your issues and away we'll go. 1.2414 0.04174 116 89 26 1
1989 How does the group feel about, eye contact, next week? 1.2414 0.04992 116 94 16 6
1990 Welcome to business class group therapy. 1.2414 0.04682 116 92 20 4
1991 Eating disorders are a common problem of the middle child. 1.2414 0.04682 116 92 20 4
1992 I won't lie to you: Triple-decker therapy couches are flimsy. 1.2414 0.04350 116 92 21 3
1993 Our hours are almost up. 1.2411 0.04438 112 87 23 2
1994 Do we want one analysis or separate today? 1.2411 0.04616 112 88 21 3
1995 Top to bottom: eccentric, neurotic, psychotic. Or is that bottom to top? Or are they, from top, lethargic, lazy and slothful? What a conundrum. 1.2411 0.05267 112 92 13 7
1996 Starting from the bottom, how do feel about your insurance not covering private sessions? 1.2411 0.04787 112 89 19 4
1997 Remember, in order to get the three for one discount you all have to have the same neurosis. 1.2411 0.04787 112 89 19 4
1998 No. I said there would be ‘tiers’ in your therapy sessions. 1.2411 0.04952 112 90 17 5
1999 Medicare for all, Psychiatric Division. 1.2411 0.05267 112 92 13 7
2000 You all have the same issue but for reasons of privacy I won't use your real names... 1.2411 0.04787 112 89 19 4
2001 So what makes you feel as if you are not special? 1.2393 0.04485 117 92 22 3
2002 I'm sorry but your 16.6667 minutes are up... 1.2389 0.05071 113 92 15 6
2003 While you're in here, you can speak threely about your feelings. 1.2376 0.05477 101 83 12 6
2004 I want you to face it; your psychosis is a lot of bunk. 1.2368 0.04712 114 91 19 4
2005 Tell me more about being stuck between a loveless marriage and an ungrateful child. 1.2368 0.04545 114 90 21 3
2006 Each one of you is the third child 1.2368 0.05031 114 93 15 6
2007 I'm not sure that a Groupon was the way to go this time. 1.2368 0.03999 114 89 23 1
2008 Who’s the middle child now? 1.2368 0.04189 114 88 25 1
2009 It’s not what you wanted to hear, but the diagnosis is clear: you have multiple personality disorder. 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2010 Steve, I can see you playing with your balls 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2011 Due to HIPPA privacy rules, this will be a silent group session. 1.2364 0.05314 110 91 12 7
2012 We'll see a breakthrough if you all remember what the shape of a love triangle is 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2013 We're taking group therapy to a higher level. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2014 Well, how else would I vertically integrate?! 1.2364 0.04269 110 90 17 3
2015 Actually, my specialty is multiple personalities. 1.2364 0.04269 110 85 24 1
2016 When you said you were suffering from multiple personalities, I took that in more of a clinical sense. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2017 Well, this way you all qualify for a discounted rate. 1.2364 0.04820 110 87 18 4
2018 No, you don't get a single diagnosis discount just because you all hated your mother. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2019 So Jean, I hear you saying you feel subordinated by the social hierarchy 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2020 Next! 1.2364 0.04460 110 88 19 3
2021 The Groupon rate doesn't include doctor-patient confidentiality. 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2022 A new patient has been added to this therapyshare. You're all headed to approximately the same emotional breakthrough. 1.2364 0.05619 110 93 8 9
2023 This group therapy arrangement will have to do until I figure out to avoid overbooking. 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2024 At this point, I think it's best that we triple your prescription. 1.2364 0.04460 110 86 22 2
2025 They didn’t teach this in graduate school! 1.2364 0.04269 110 85 24 1
2026 Stevies, I think I see a screenplay in this. 1.2364 0.05468 110 92 10 8
2027 This really isn't what co-pay means. 1.2364 0.04460 110 85 22 2
2028 So I'm assuming an LGBTQ menage a trois power struggle here" someone PLEASE start" 1.2364 0.04460 110 86 22 2
2029 Welcome to, 'Transition: From Submarine Life to Civilian Life." 1.2364 0.04269 110 85 24 1
2030 Let's begin with the triage...which one of you is most upset with my last bill? 1.2364 0.04820 110 87 18 4
2031 Now I know why she charges a third of other psychiatrists. 1.2364 0.04990 110 89 16 5
2032 Complex answers aside, what associations do you have to the word 'Oedipus'? 1.2364 0.05619 110 93 8 9
2033 You realize, of course, you are ADOPTED triplets 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2034 It's the new way to do group. No confrontations. 1.2364 0.04460 110 86 22 2
2035 Ok. Three part harmony. “Lo-o-ove is coming, lo-o-ve is coming to us all.” 1.2364 0.05314 110 91 12 7
2036 I would encourage you to stop watching 'This Is Us" 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2037 For once, the black guy's not on the bottom! 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2038 If any more personalities emerge, I will have to raise your fee! 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2039 Sorry, it’s the only way we can keep up this election year. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2040 To which of your personalities should we send the bill? 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2041 Jamais deux sans trois! 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2042 Before we begin, I'll need to see that buy one, get two free coupon. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2043 Our Entertainment book defines "session" as "a single appointment for therapeutic purposes with one or more participants"...so I can only accept one coupon. 1.2364 0.05468 110 92 10 8
2044 Personally, I’m a hoarder. 1.2364 0.05619 110 93 8 9
2045 Seems your Split Personality is real. 1.2364 0.05154 110 90 14 6
2046 Worst coupon ever. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2047 Imagine if you will each of you is a layer in a clubhouse sandwich 1.2364 0.04990 110 89 16 5
2048 Susan, superiority complex. Ted, you’re too compromising. Bob, low self esteem. Our time’s up. See you next week. 1.2364 0.04990 110 89 16 5
2049 Well, Steyer, Klobuchar and Buttigieg won't win the nomination anyway, so it will be easier to be friends again after they drop out. 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2050 Well, to begin--because I think we should address the elephant in the room--the correct title would be This Is We. 1.2364 0.04460 110 86 22 2
2051 Let's begin our session with a few stanzas from Kumbaya. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2052 Same question to daybed number 2. 1.2364 0.05314 110 91 12 7
2053 Okay, now Jim on the bottom, what are your top two concerns? 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2054 Tell me about your mother/partner/new medication. 1.2364 0.04269 110 85 24 1
2055 We’re here to debunk myths about group therapy 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2056 Of course, it’s called “Group Therapy” 1.2364 0.04990 110 89 16 5
2057 No discount for triplets. 1.2364 0.04990 110 89 16 5
2058 For you, Ethel, I AM a Freudian. Curtis, you can think of me as a Jungian. As for you, Bobby, didn't mother tell you to go nap in your own room? 1.2364 0.04990 110 89 16 5
2059 I didn't know the discount rate meant we all get the same diagnosis! 1.2364 0.04460 110 86 22 2
2060 How do you feel about your GroupOn purchase? 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2061 I always have clients in reserve in case someone cancels. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2062 Well, what did you think "copay" meant? 1.2364 0.04460 110 86 22 2
2063 It suddenly occurred to her that group therapy combined with a tanning salon would maximize profitability. 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2064 Before we proceed, let me take roll call. 1.2364 0.04269 110 85 24 1
2065 Oh, it looks like my next appointment's coming up. Everyone, move up a spot. 1.2364 0.04460 110 86 22 2
2066 "So, you each really thought that Medicare For All would work without some unique modifications to your current health plan?" 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2067 Of course, some analysts have debunked Freud's theory of the Id, Ego and Super-Ego...but in your case I think it might be useful. 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2068 Given that your love triangle is out-of-network, this is a win-win for all parties. 1.2364 0.04990 110 89 16 5
2069 Your insurance wouldn't pay for a ladder. 1.2364 0.04460 110 86 22 2
2070 Welcome to managed care! 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2071 Anyone never had group therapy before? 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2072 Welcome to your first time share therapy. 1.2364 0.04460 110 86 22 2
2073 Why don't you feel special? 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2074 Tell me more about why you don’t feel unique, Jerome. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2075 Does 60% off your hourly rate make you feel happy? 1.2364 0.04460 110 86 22 2
2076 Just to reiterate,no one has been involved in a menage a trois before? 1.2364 0.04990 110 89 16 5
2077 Perhaps the problem is that you’re talking over each other. 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2078 Regardless of how it may feel, it's important to remember that you're not alone. 1.2364 0.04269 110 85 24 1
2079 Let's start with the highest co-pay. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2080 Bob, Carol and Ted we can't start until Alice gets here 1.2364 0.04069 110 84 26 0
2081 So let me get this right, you all think you are the same person? 1.2364 0.04820 110 88 18 4
2082 Marsha's plan to multitask didn't quite pan out as well as she planned. 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2083 Now let's talk further about your fear of parking garages. 1.2364 0.05154 110 90 14 6
2084 So, you suspect your relationship is not entirely monogamous? 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2085 Time sharing is the latest thing in therapy! 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2086 No, I'm not going to get you a glass of milk. Please try to stay focused. 1.2364 0.04990 110 89 16 5
2087 I try not to judge, but I'm detecting a load of bunk. 1.2364 0.05154 110 90 14 6
2088 It's a new concept. it's called trickle down pyschotherapy 1.2364 0.04644 110 87 20 3
2089 Welcome to 'fear of bunk bed immersion therapy' 1.2342 0.04949 111 90 16 5
2090 And now for the tertiary analysis you've been waiting for ... 1.2342 0.04607 111 88 20 3
2091 Family rate 1.2342 0.04607 111 88 20 3
2092 The advantage of having multiple personalities is the group discount. 1.2342 0.04949 111 90 16 5
2093 My current approach to throuple therapy is three-tiered. 1.2330 0.04820 103 82 18 3
2094 I will be listening to all three of you but, I will be paying special attention to you 1.2330 0.05014 103 83 16 4
2095 So tell me, are you actually a middle child? 1.2330 0.04514 103 83 17 3
2096 So, did d'Artagnan refer you? 1.2321 0.04909 112 95 10 7
2097 Why does everyone think the daughter is the favorite? Let's start at the top. 1.2321 0.04909 112 91 16 5
2098 Let's begin with my mother. 1.2315 0.04482 108 85 21 2
2099 Next up, the swimsuit round. 1.2315 0.05028 108 88 15 5
2100 Bachelor number two... how would you describe your relationship with your mother? 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2101 My fees range from a high of $250 to a low of $150. 1.2294 0.04250 109 85 23 1
2102 an orthodox analyst doing group therapy 1.2294 0.05154 109 90 13 6
2103 No, there is no discount for multiple personalities. 1.2294 0.04446 109 88 18 3
2104 Now, tell me about your mother(s). 1.2294 0.04633 109 87 19 3
2105 This joke follows the rule of threes and this is the only way we could fit you all in the panel 1.2294 0.04633 109 87 19 3
2106 There's no easy way to say this, but I'm diagnosing you with Multiple Personalities Disorder. 1.2294 0.04986 109 89 15 5
2107 Yes. This is the format for Freudian group therapy 1.2294 0.04986 109 89 15 5
2108 Of course, your therapy will be 2/3 less effective… 1.2294 0.04250 109 85 23 1
2109 After you use the restroom we rotate. 1.2294 0.04633 109 87 19 3
2110 Okay, who is the parent, who is the child and who is the adult - such a love drama triangle... 1.2294 0.04986 109 89 15 5
2111 So, you just watch? 1.2294 0.04986 109 89 15 5
2112 My diagnosis is you have multiple personalities 1.2294 0.04986 109 89 15 5
2113 At this time, please insure that your therapeutic couches are in their full upright and locked position. 1.2294 0.04446 109 86 21 2
2114 So when did you all start believing you were the "Mod Squad"? 1.2294 0.04633 109 87 19 3
2115 Is this your first group therapy session? 1.2294 0.04986 109 89 15 5
2116 I think this will make your multiple personalities feel more comfortable. 1.2294 0.04446 109 86 21 2
2117 Sorry,but buy one session,get two free it was your choice... 1.2294 0.04633 109 87 19 3
2118 it isn't exactly multi-tasking. 1.2294 0.04446 109 86 21 2
2119 I'm not sure this family therapy bundle was a good idea. 1.2294 0.04446 109 86 21 2
2120 The tiered-cake counseling strategy always works best with ménage à trois relationship difficulties. 1.2294 0.04813 109 88 17 4
2121 Your psyche is structured into three parts : the ego, the superego, and the complete lack of ego. 1.2294 0.04813 109 88 17 4
2122 What if you're all really the same person?" 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2123 Now if this group therapy seems to be a little weird, well, it is. 1.2286 0.04541 105 82 20 2
2124 Think of it as speed-dating for your insurers. 1.2286 0.04738 105 84 18 3
2125 And how does what Kate feels about what Craig feels make you feel? 1.2286 0.05110 105 86 14 5
2126 Today's session is Trickle Down Psychotherapy 1.2286 0.04541 105 83 20 2
2127 Traditional therapy just doesn't stack up to my methods. 1.2286 0.05110 105 86 14 5
2128 What is your position in life? 1.2286 0.04334 105 82 22 1
2129 Tell me about your sleep-away camp trauma. 1.2286 0.04541 105 83 20 2
2130 Excess emotional baggage fees will be charged separately. 1.2286 0.04541 105 83 20 2
2131 Craziest first. That's you, Brian. 1.2286 0.04928 105 85 16 4
2132 Today we’re going to talk about autonomy. 1.2286 0.04334 105 82 22 1
2133 Who was liked best? 1.2286 0.04334 105 82 22 1
2134 You all did say you wanted group therapy? 1.2286 0.04738 105 84 18 3
2135 Talk about rat race huh 1.2273 0.05427 110 93 9 8
2136 Why do you think that people don't appreciate your individuality? 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2137 You will each be billed separately for the hour. 1.2273 0.04595 110 88 19 3
2138 Let's start with the middle child. 1.2273 0.04217 110 86 23 1
2139 I'd like to explore what each of you were feeling right before you were traumatized by the Final Jeopardy question the day your episode was taped... 1.2264 0.04886 106 86 16 4
2140 I see you used the groupon. 1.2264 0.04698 106 85 18 3
2141 In this test of higher consciousness, one of you will be a placebo. 1.2258 0.05747 93 78 9 6
2142 Is this my dream or yours? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2143 They do not pay me enough for this shit 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2144 If top bunk isn’t good enough for you, Marjorie, we can find you another. 1.2255 0.04602 102 84 16 2
2145 And how would you say birth order affects your relationships? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2146 Doris, has your surge to the top been worth the sacrifice of your friends? 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2147 Sorry for the fees hike, but my publisher isn’t interested in the "Three faces of stEVE" manuscript 1.2255 0.05380 102 85 11 6
2148 Whose Groupon account should I charge this week's session to? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2149 A third of the attention, a third of the premium, hahaha! No, but seriously, let’s get started... 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2150 Well, this is how we do it if you have a Groupon. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2151 All of us benefit when we bring diversity to the workplace. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2152 I promise there will be plenty of sessions for each of you to be on top 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2153 We are now going to work on Andrea's trust issues by having her fall off the top bunk at which point you, Lennie and Bill, will catch her before she splatters on the Berber. 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2154 What did you expect with Medicare for all? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2155 I was thinking split the bill but separate tips. 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2156 Well, this is why you shouldn’t buy therapy on Groupon. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2157 So Quentin, both Julie and Don say they wish you would stop saying, 'I hear voices in my bed!'. How does that make you feel? 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 14 4
2158 Let's go back to that part about 'not having enough time for yourself.' 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2159 Let us begin. The family saver plan covers a combined 100 Kwords. 1.2255 0.05557 102 86 9 7
2160 Let's all think vertically. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2161 What is the problem from your viewpoint? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2162 And number three- how do I remind you of your mother? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2163 I believe all of our problems are rooted in summer camp” 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2164 I'm sorry we only got the second bunk, but our time is up for today. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2165 Therapy under Bernie Sander's health plan 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2166 Jamie, Tyler, Jayden, what do you feel is the hardest thing about being in a thruple? 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2167 Okay, I'll just spout some psychobabble, and you guys figure out who it best applies to. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2168 As it's a new and fragile patient stacking system - may I remind you not to sneeze.. 1.2255 0.03662 102 80 18 1
2169 So you feel like the man in the middle. Let's explore that. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2170 Research out of Camp Winnipisake suggests that bunking increases communication. 1.2255 0.05380 102 85 11 6
2171 Well, what did you expect with the three-for-one deal? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2172 Ok, White House Correspondents, what’s on the agenda for today? 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2173 ... and how will you be splitting the co-pay? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2174 I see your problem has many layers... 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2175 So you are all addicted to Groupon. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2176 You, in the middle row, suck it in! 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2177 Thank you for choosing Uber’s newest programming, “Share-a-therapy, and as always, please rate me with “5 stars” if you’ve enjoyed your therapy,” 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2178 Glad you are relaxing into our new protocol for multiple personality disorders 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2179 So you have the same mother... 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2180 May I see the groupon? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2181 Discount for family group plan?; right!??? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2182 Some people think psychiatry is a load of bunk. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2183 Middle Bunk Syndrome is actually very common 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2184 Yes, I can accommodate more personalities as the need arises. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2185 You all seem to be exhibiting what the DSM 5 characterizes as "This Is Us" Disorder. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2186 I think what we've learned here is that Timothy feels more grounded when you give him a some extra space. 1.2255 0.05380 102 85 11 6
2187 This is good, tell me about the domineering member of the quartet... 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2188 When did all the lying begin? 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2189 I'm sorry that we have to do this but we have a line of 4,000 waiting and only so much time. Let's begin with a deep breath and our mantra "I no longer fear people with masks, children, public restrooms, shopping carts, pharmacies, airlines.... 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2190 I get it. The group sessions cost less. 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2191 And you're feeling caught in the middle. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2192 So is it fair to say that this has become a polyamory without the amory? 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2193 Ask yourself, what deep in your subconscious made you ask if there is a discount rate for siblings. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2194 And what would you say you find most stressful about your coworking space? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2195 Well, I think you've all arrived! We at Cheapo Counseling recognize you have many choices in mental health services. We thank you for choosing Cheapo. 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2196 So you signed up for the discounted group plan? 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2197 And how does that make all of you feel? 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2198 I see the Superego has taken the top bunk again. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2199 You got it on groupon as well? 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2200 In my vast experience as a Freudian psychoanalyst, it stems from the mother, and trickles down from there. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2201 Is this everyone's first time in group therapy? 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2202 I saw you in "This Is Us." So I already know your problems. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2203 Uber Therapy Pool 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2204 Why do YOU think summer camp didn't live up to your expectations? 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2205 Do you feel like you live in the shadow of your siblings? 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2206 Now that you've witnessed how ineffective this therapy arrangement is, are any of you ready for a private consultation? 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2207 I think it's pretty obvious who the middle child is among you. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2208 You are my trifecta: 13 total personalities, each billed separately. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2209 Just to clarify, your goal is full integration of mind and body? 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2210 You're the ones that wanted to use a Groupon. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2211 And of course I will keep that in the strictest confidence, 2 pm Bottom. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2212 One out of three is not bad. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2213 The mental health coverage deductible you have chosen.... 1.2255 0.04158 102 79 22 0
2214 There is a clear manifestation of multiple personalities here. 1.2255 0.05380 102 85 11 6
2215 Patient number two - please describe your idea of a perfect date. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2216 Did everyone give the receptionist their groupon code? 1.2255 0.04158 102 79 23 0
2217 I think there's been a misunderstanding. I sell furniture. 1.2255 0.05380 102 85 11 6
2218 I'm sorry for your confusion, but the sign clearly says THREE-apist 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2219 Since you all are feeling insignificant I decided to get you all out of the way at once. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2220 When they said group therapy, this is not what I had in mind... 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2221 We will start at the top today and rotate next session. It is all about sharing . 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2222 I call this individualized group therapy 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2223 This isn't what I was thinking when she asked if we could carpool to therapy 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2224 Welcome to the first of the 10 group therapy sessions you purchased on Groupon.com 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2225 This will not help with your mental issues, but it does help prepare you for mass incarceration. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2226 How do you all feel about that? 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2227 I thought it would be nice For our little group, and it would also help Jonathan with his unnatural fear of bunk beds 1.2255 0.03918 102 80 21 0
2228 How do each of you feel about your HMO? 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2229 Your odds are one in three. 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2230 Before we start, here are my ground rules: First, no cookie jokes. Second, no sandwich jokes. Third, no ménage-à-trois discounts. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2231 Thank you, Larry. And exactly when did you start feeling this loss of individuality? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2232 Each of you gets twenty minutes to spill his or her guts. Who wants to go first ? 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2233 Next question is for contestant number 3. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2234 Multi tier or scaleable? To-may-to to-mah-to. It's all therapy. 1.2255 0.04386 102 83 15 3
2235 I think it's time we begin talking about termination given you started your therapy 35 years ago and still havn't worked out who gets which bunk bed. 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2236 Jeremy, you're in the wrong cartoon, and ditch the tie 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2237 Well, you all wanted me to fit you in. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2238 Yes, each “personality” will need to pay. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2239 Welcome to "Overcoming My Fear Of Bunkbeds" seminar. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2240 I'm sorry, your 5 minutes are up. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2241 Well now, Seems like you're all in this together 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2242 You know, your group therapy sessions will be useless if you start snoring! 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2243 Before we get to what brings you here today, let me just say, you are all amazing. 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2244 Groupon? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2245 I asked my new scheduling assistant to stack my clients. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2246 Again, apologies--I didn't mean to stack my appointments. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2247 We'll handle the Groupon at the end. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2248 We're going to take this one level at a time. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2249 ...and I promise to give each of you the individual attention you deserve. Now, about those confidentiality waivers... 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2250 There, now will you stop complaining about the wait times? 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2251 So, you think the issue may be an unconscious sense of hierarchy among you siblings? 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2252 Now we'll deal with Mary who still wets the bed 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2253 No. It's not called "stacking". We call it "constructive interaction." 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2254 So what makes you think you suffer from multiple personality disorder? 1.2255 0.04158 102 79 23 0
2255 Your answers to my questions will be recorded and machine-scored. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2256 Now, tell me more about that comet your waiting for so you can leave this planet and why. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2257 I'm sorry, but the group rate does not include doctor-patient confidentiality. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2258 Let’s role-play birth order trauma. Lucy, now you get in the middle bunk. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2259 Sorry, I can't give you the group rate... you all have different problems. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2260 Tell me why do you deserve the top bunk. 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2261 ahhh yes, budget cuts. You're all here to complain about your spouse anyway. Heck, I'll start. 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2262 I have a theory, but you're welcome to debunk it. 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2263 I want you all to relax and take a deep breath. Mr. Brown please tell me why you don’t believe Harry is your son. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2264 So let's first talk about voting for 'Medicare for All.' 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2265 And this is what we call “Goldilocks Syndrome” 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2266 How much caffeine have you all been having? 1.2255 0.05557 102 86 9 7
2267 Welcome to "Shrink on a budget"! You will each have exactly 16.67 minutes to talk with no charge for eavesdropping. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2268 Get over it! Birth order does NOT determine triplet middle children! 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2269 Your insurance doesn't cover you for the top bunk, Gerard. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2270 Let's first acknowledge that the patience and teamwork required to build such a thing together means that your relationship is not too far gone. 1.2255 0.04158 102 83 17 2
2271 One more session, and then I'll choose. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2272 Healthcare for all(at once), America’s solution to affordable healthcare. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2273 Look, the fees are only one-third what they'd normally be. 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2274 Ahmmmm, Third level therapy still requires casual dress. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2275 The ad was correct. It’s a three bed apartment. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2276 Yes, the Groupon did say three for one - three people, one session. 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2277 Until, now, my office was too small for family therapy. 1.2255 0.04602 102 80 19 2
2278 And how long has top bunk been making you feel that way, bottom bunk? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2279 Oh no! triple booked again? 1.2255 0.04158 102 79 23 0
2280 Same sperm donor, eh? 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2281 Please, don't all free associate at once. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2282 Susan, Jackson, Billy welcome to your first “living with multiple personality disorder” session. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2283 As I said I first want to debunk the idea that you are all not being treated fairly in life 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2284 You realize you are paying less 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2285 I hope you don't think this is a 3 for the price of 1 session. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2286 This experiment will probably end badly, but since all of you share a car ride together, I’m willing to give it try. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2287 Even with the new approach, Henry felt forgotten as the middle child. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2288 Don't be embarrassed, tiers are a normal part of the process 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2289 It does seem unfair that the guy on the bottom gets the most space. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2290 You say these feelings started after you all left the Navy? 1.2255 0.05196 102 84 13 5
2291 I hope you're as pleased as I am with your level of progress. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2292 Throuples therapy can be challenging. 1.2255 0.04602 102 81 19 2
2293 It's actually just group therapy by definition...you have my undivided attention. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2294 I'm pretty sure your issues with sibling rivalry have already been debunked. 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2295 Welcome to our first Groupon therapy session. I hope no one has a fear of falling and if so, we’ll start with that... 1.2255 0.04386 102 79 21 1
2296 Today let's delve into your feelings of inadequacy and lack of individuality. 1.2255 0.04386 102 82 17 2
2297 Okay, tell me the story from top to bottom. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2298 In your case, I think that exploring your multiple personalities went two far 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2299 You'll each have to poll above 10% to participate in the next session. 1.2255 0.05380 102 85 11 6
2300 It works perfectly when you all have the same problem. 1.2245 0.04707 98 78 18 2
2301 If you wake up naked just remember we're all family here. 1.2245 0.04925 98 79 16 3
2302 Are you feeling anger towards Groupon? 1.2243 0.04844 107 87 16 4
2303 We’ll start with you Jeffery... how does Ted’s memories make you feel? 1.2233 0.05150 103 85 13 5
2304 I understand it was difficult for you all when your joint venture in chaise bunk beds went bankrupt 1.2233 0.05150 103 85 13 5
2305 And why do Id and Ego never get the top bunk? 1.2233 0.05332 103 86 11 6
2306 Perhaps you have an unusual attachment to each other. 1.2233 0.04962 103 84 15 4
2307 Which one of you said last week said you dream of sandwiches? 1.2233 0.04562 103 82 19 2
2308 Welcome to our inaugural psychologist b&b session 1.2233 0.04562 103 85 15 3
2309 Today we will be reliving the traumas of summer camp. Carol, you first. 1.2233 0.04962 103 84 15 4
2310 It’s true; much of psychiatry Is bunk. 1.2233 0.04766 103 83 17 3
2311 Part of the problem is that you're always on top of one another. 1.2233 0.04348 103 81 21 1
2312 I'd like to thank all of your personalities for joining us today. 1.2233 0.04562 103 82 19 2
2313 Um, sorry, remind me again...which one of you was the bedwetter? 1.2233 0.04962 103 84 15 4
2314 This is not what we meant by 'Three sessions for the price of one!' 1.2233 0.04562 103 82 19 2
2315 And when did you first feel this loss of individualism? 1.2233 0.04124 103 80 23 0
2316 You’ve been invited here today to help debunk the myth of the id, the ego, and the super ego plus save some dough. 1.2232 0.04522 112 90 19 3
2317 You did the best you could, the best you knew how at the time. 1.2222 0.04665 99 79 18 2
2318 Just so you know. Therapy is cheaper by the dozen. 1.2222 0.04881 99 80 16 3
2319 No one said: "Medicare for All" would be "Medicare for Each Individual. 1.2212 0.04918 104 85 15 4
2320 Time’s up! 1.2212 0.04918 104 85 15 4
2321 Before we begin, let’s go through the terms and conditions of this Groupon deal. 1.2200 0.05041 100 82 14 4
2322 Sorry, but couch space is really at a premium here in Manhattan. 1.2200 0.04837 100 81 16 3
2323 Tell me about your mother... and your mother... and your mother 1.2200 0.04837 100 81 16 3
2324 Birth order continues to impact lives through adulthood. 1.2200 0.04623 100 80 18 2
2325 Well, Marci has a fear of heights, Tom has issues with being a middle child and Tracy has low self esteem 1.2200 0.04837 100 81 16 3
2326 We call this hat trick therapy. 1.2200 0.04623 100 80 18 2
2327 Sorry kids but my flight leaves LaGuardia in 90 minutes. So who's first? 1.2200 0.05041 100 82 14 3
2328 And why do you feel like you're never the center of attention? 1.2200 0.04837 100 81 16 3
2329 So let’s talk about your Groupon addiction. 1.2198 0.05806 91 77 8 6
2330 So what I'm hearing is that all of you have abandonment issues. 1.2178 0.04582 101 81 18 2
2331 Your unique problem happens to everyone. 1.2178 0.04582 101 81 18 2
2332 what did you expect when I offered you all a 2/3rds promotional discount on therapy 1.2178 0.04361 101 80 20 1
2333 This should prepare you for a long quarantine on a cruise ship. 1.2178 0.04361 101 80 20 1
2334 Say more about not feeling seen as an individual. 1.2178 0.04582 101 81 18 2
2335 Look, I know it's not ideal but don't forget you're getting a 30% discount! 1.2178 0.04794 101 82 16 3
2336 Your image of layered past selves is normal and represents growth. 1.2178 0.04794 101 82 16 3
2337 It's not favoritism. He is being treated for a fear of heights. 1.2178 0.05190 101 84 12 5
2338 Before I got my license? I was a flight attendant for Spirit Airlines... Why do you ask? 1.2178 0.04996 101 83 14 4
2339 Let's discuss your fear of pancakes. 1.2178 0.04996 101 83 14 4
2340 So tell me, how long have you been hearing these voices. 1.2178 0.04582 101 81 18 2
2341 You each have 90 seconds. Let’s start from the top. 1.2178 0.04361 101 80 20 1
2342 Thank you all for coming in. I’m sure that, together, we can debunk this problem. 1.2178 0.04794 101 84 13 4
2343 You can speak freely. I specialize in multiple personality disorders. 1.2178 0.04794 101 82 16 3
2344 You are all suffering from tripolar disease. 1.2178 0.04794 101 82 16 3
2345 If you wanted personal service you should have selected CounselingX, not CounselingPool 1.2178 0.04794 101 82 16 3
2346 Ok in group therapy we start at the bottom. 1.2178 0.04996 101 83 14 4
2347 And why do you think you struggle to be heard? 1.2178 0.04361 101 80 20 1
2348 Relax. I’m just here to debunk your anxieties. 1.2178 0.04582 101 81 18 2
2349 Be careful, Lorraine, up there on that top bunk. Last Thursday, a patient fell and broke her hip after a Freudian slip. 1.2178 0.04996 101 83 14 4
2350 Oh my dears. It's not a threesome if you use bunk beds. 1.2178 0.04582 101 81 18 2
2351 And your turn number three. How does that make you feel? 1.2178 0.04582 101 81 18 2
2352 No, it's not really group therapy, since hugging will be impossible. 1.2178 0.04996 101 83 14 4
2353 Your health insurance covers only semi-private group sessions. 1.2178 0.04582 101 81 18 2
2354 It's like a ride-share for your childhood trauma 1.2178 0.04794 101 82 16 3
2355 Now tell me your perspective. 1.2178 0.04794 101 82 16 3
2356 What pronoun does this come with? 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2357 Really? I've never heard of an 'evil triplet' before. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2358 Okay, that's enough bunk for one session. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2359 I see your troubles have tripled since last week. 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2360 Let me explain the difference, this is called Groupon therapy 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2361 So when did you first realize that your ménage à trois was not working out 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2362 America, we all have same issues. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2363 It's definitely Single Personality Disorder, but the good news is that I'll charge you as one client. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2364 I see you are using the Groupon today. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2365 Relax, this is family therapy 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2366 Paul Lynde for the block! 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2367 You would be surprised how many problems have their root in berth order. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2368 If you all agree to the same personal hang-up, I can give you the psychotherapy group rate this month. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2369 No, Super-ego, you can't change places with Id. You've countermanded him twice today and you keep interrupting Ego's monologue. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2370 It's our innovative approach to thruples therapy. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2371 Multiple Person Disorder is not a thing. 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2372 In store psychiatry clinics at COSTCO 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2373 Now remind me, which one of you says you’re experiencing boundary issues? 1.2165 0.04203 97 76 21 0
2374 So, which one of you is the super-ego? 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2375 I’m beginning to realize this group therapy session is a lot of bunk. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2376 Health Care for all.... So tell me about your dreams. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2377 Super, we’ll start with you, and work on down to Id. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2378 I'm afraid our time is up and up and up. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2379 We all make choices, your choice was to choose the cheapest managed care plan... 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2380 Before we begin, a reminder that there is no excess baggage allowed with your economy session. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2381 but you all chose polyamory, so whats the problem? 1.2165 0.04687 97 77 17 2
2382 Now, let’s consider an alternative perspective. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2383 The 16.66 minute hour. 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2384 I am for "medicare for all... together". 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2385 Try to recall when you first felt unimportant. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2386 Listen up. Yes, the new Group Therapy Family Discount Plan does allow for a ten minute nap break. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2387 This appears to be a clear case of multiple personalities 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2388 One, two, three, upper, middle, lower. Where do YOU think you belong?” 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2389 well, why do you think this wasn't what you had in mind when you asked about a family discount" 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2390 Maybe Groupon is not the best for EVERY business. 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2391 Why don’t we take it from the top? 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2392 Friends and family discount. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2393 I’m glad to offer this reduced rate therapy. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2394 So which one of you used to pee the bed? 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2395 You say you all have gender issues -your whole family? 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2396 I'll bring back the ladder if you tell me who's sleeping with who. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2397 I understand your nervous. I was too when I first tried UberPool. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2398 Can you compliment her on getting up there without a ladder? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2399 I just can't seem to get any time for myself 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2400 Anything you say here is safe with me. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2401 Settle down. It’s better than two pair. 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2402 Didn't you learn to look someone in the eyes when you talk to them? 1.2165 0.05719 97 83 7 7
2403 It's your mother It's your mother It's your mother 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2404 No, Aaron, you were Id last week. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2405 Welcome to Costco Psychotherapy 1.2165 0.04203 97 76 21 0
2406 It may seem like you have multiple personality disorder, but I don't think that's the case. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2407 -I feel people don't take me seriously. -Please wait for your turn sr. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2408 It seems like all you see is what divides you. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2409 So, as one of triplets, who wants to say what it feels like to never be treated as an individual? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2410 Sarah, please uncross your legs. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2411 Just one small quibble. Shouldn’t it be “This is We? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2412 The whole world is watching psychiatric patients, while the patients are watching TV. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2413 Everybody gets Xanax! 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2414 In the name of efficiency, I need to tell you that nobody cares about your problems. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2415 It’s not that unusual when you consider the cost of a four bedroom in the Hamptons. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2416 The newest millennial experience: story time with “Mom” 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2417 Yes, most of the rumors surrounding my practice have been debunked. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2418 I'd like to start with the one who "speaks no evil". 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2419 Budget cuts. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2420 Okay, which one of you is not on their diet? 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2421 Yeah, well I think that's a lot of bunk. 1.2165 0.05124 97 81 10 5
2422 It's not a disorder if there actually are three of you. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2423 Economy therapy sessions now available after 3pm! 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2424 If you both want a closer relationship with your son, let's start by having him in the middle chair. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2425 This is how we can pay for Medicare for all...how do we like it? 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2426 And you ALL have had inklings of a former life as sardines? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2427 Which one of you is Us? 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2428 This is what you get with an ACA bronze plan 1.2165 0.04203 97 76 21 0
2429 'There were no right or wrong answers in a tense final round of 'Therapy!'' 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2430 Let's make this quick. Netflix is removing Frasier from it's line up and I'm only on season 5. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2431 Excuse me! That question was meant for your middle self. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2432 Feel lucky—not everyone gets this much legroom. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2433 Patient Number Three, if you were on a date with Patient Number Two and your therapist texted to ask how best to respond to what Patient Number One just shared, would you recommend all caps?" 1.2165 0.05528 97 82 9 6
2434 Next time on This is Us.... 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2435 So, tell me about this interdependence thing. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2436 When did you first come to know that you'd been ordained Queen Bitch? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2437 If you're familiar with UberPool you'll get the hang of this pretty quickly. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2438 So your parents don't think you stack up, is that what I'm hearing? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2439 You'll experience 3 distinct stages. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2440 And are you always dissatisfied with your position in life? 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2441 I’m sorry, number 2, but exactly why do you feel three-tier psychotherapy is impersonal? 1.2165 0.04910 97 78 15 3
2442 Do you enjoy being on top? 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2443 I think this is a breakthrough. Your Id, Ego, and Superego seem to all be working together. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2444 So last week Rita was on top, Jim in second and Pete finished third. Let's see who has the best dream today! 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2445 I'm not listening to any of your bunk. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2446 And... you're triplets? 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2447 Ok, maybe you can start by telling me why you feel that people aren't giving you their undivided attention. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2448 Sorry. Reaching the 'next level' didn't really change much for me. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2449 Look at it this way: Hell has at least twice as many levels. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2450 Being on top is not all it's cracked up to be, or not. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2451 Well Eve, I did say I'd give you a multi personality discount... 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2452 Thank you for coming early. My son has a T-ball game at 2. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2453 Each or your insurance plans cut my bill by 2/3 - I'm demonstrating my new "Patient Efficiency Initiative"! 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2454 So, why do you think you feel like a third wheel? 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2455 Customer service means everything...would you agree this is an improvement over one bed for three? 1.2165 0.04452 97 79 16 2
2456 It's important that you rotate each week in order to avoid the dreaded "Lower Couch Inferiority Complex" 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2457 It's just a visualization tool. Let's start with the middle child. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2458 First, I'd like to assure you that I treat my Groupon patients no differently than those who pay full price... 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2459 I told you not to buy the Groupon deal. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2460 Sorry about this, but I still have to pack. 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2461 Thank you for sharing that. Now, let’s shear what your other personalities want to say about your mother. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2462 The diagnosis: three patents, one personality. How to bill ? 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2463 This Groupon thing isn't working. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2464 Group therapy for the individual. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2465 Which one of you wets the bed? 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2466 This is not group therapy, it is individual therapy with no insurance! 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2467 I know you expected to pay 1/3 of my normal rate,but with the extra overhead I'll have to charge you 50%. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2468 That's just a lot of bunk 1.2165 0.04910 97 77 15 3
2469 Group therapy is a real timesaver 1.2165 0.04910 97 78 15 3
2470 Raise your hand if you are feeling out of place. 1.2165 0.04203 97 76 21 0
2471 We had a Groupon. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2472 I'm sorry. This Groupon is good for a single Jungian analysis session only. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2473 Relax - and remember,you will each have a turn as the middle child. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2474 I'm hearing that one of you is down in the dumps and another is on top of the world... 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2475 OK, you on top, you are super-ego, in the middle, you are ego and you on the bottom, you are the id. Now figure it out. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2476 OK...let's take it from the top again. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2477 But Marcia, Greg is still your brother, step or not. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2478 This isn’t the way we learned it in college but the HMO’s are really cutting back on my fees. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2479 Ok, so perhaps each of you would like to start by telling me how you FEEL about the health care system... 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2480 Freud did some groundbreaking work on threeways, yes. So tell me about your mothers." 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2481 No, you’re in Group Therapy IKEA. Group Therapy Hygge is down the hall. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2482 In my practice I have never encountered a case of Multiple Body Disorder. May I publish? 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2483 Welcome to diversity therapy with rotating couches each session. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2484 I'll never get away this summer things are so stacked up at work. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2485 I'm afraid you three are disturbed on too many levels for me to be of assistance... 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2486 In my experience all unhappy families are alike. 1.2165 0.04452 97 79 16 2
2487 So, the hive mind? It's not a real thing. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2488 This is the family rate so get used to it. 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2489 What did you expect when you purchased time with a therapist on Groupon? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2490 So how did summer camp impact your inability to sleep alone? 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2491 "No, it's not from Ikea. I actually got it at Home Depot." 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2492 And why do you suppose you are still hung up on hierarchy? 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2493 You should have read the small print on your Groupon. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2494 I truly value patient confidentiality, so please be sure to pretend no else is here when it's your turn. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2495 Group therapy, yes, but group therapy with respect for tradition. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2496 Eenie....tell meanie again, was it minee or moe that kept confusing things? 1.2165 0.05528 97 82 9 6
2497 Triple layer nuts. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2498 Would you like to split the tab? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2499 YES, I WILL ONLY CHARGE YOU EACH FOR 1/3 OF A SESSION. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2500 I understand that your problems have stacked up. 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2501 I'm so glad you all decided to come back home for thanksgiving. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2502 Yes. Ménage à trois therapy is a specialty of mine. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2503 No, the group rate only applies if you all have the same problems and respond to the same therapies. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2504 Once again from the top, please? 1.2165 0.05528 97 82 9 6
2505 So how long have you all worked together? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2506 The results of "Medicare for All at Once" 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2507 You, on the top -- go first. You have to be the most desperate to have climbed up there. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2508 I think a lot of these issues stem from Middle Child Syndrome 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2509 You feel that Amber gets the most support in the group? 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2510 Some people say we have separation anxiety. 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2511 Just to be clear, how long do we have until your group acupuncture appointment? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2512 I think you may have issues with codependancy. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2513 Veterans Mental Health Psychatrist: Of course there’s patient Dr. confidentiality when one is talking the other stick your fingers in your ears 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2514 But couldn't your agoraphobia actually be a mild case of vertigo? 1.2165 0.04452 97 77 19 1
2515 If you're happy with today's session, please give me a review on Groupon. 1.2165 0.04910 97 78 15 3
2516 Have you considered moving out of Manhattan? 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2517 One of you really needs to drop out. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2518 So Jane, can you explain why you feel superior to the rest of the group? 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2519 It's your mother's fault. Your mother's fault. Your mother's fault... 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2520 Don't worry, Nathan. I think Diane meant an emotional collapse. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2521 The myth of the multiple patient disorder has been debunked. 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2522 If you all talk at the same time you’ll get the full hour. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2523 Patient number two; describe your dreamiest session. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2524 So you think your issues stem from your helicopter parents? 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2525 And what are YOUR goals, Mr. Middleman" 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2526 Who had the distant mother again? 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2527 This takes sharing and caring to another level. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2528 When I suggested a triple session, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind... 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2529 Let's talk about why we're all here - compartmentalization. 1.2157 0.04951 102 84 14 4
2530 He really took ‘test group’ to a whole new level 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2531 Although unusual, I know a tripolar disorder when I see it. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2532 Let's start with BottomBunk: did you wear a tie because you have unresolved mommy issues? 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2533 Therapy Groupon 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2534 Hi, I'm Beth. I'll be your camp counselor this summer. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2535 So tell me again, which one of you is Id? 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2536 This deal is only good on wednesdays at 2 o'clock. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2537 Seat assignments are temporary, just until I learn names. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2538 Welcome to the first session of our "Fear of Intimacy in Bed" group. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2539 Last time I sign up for a mind altering threesome. 1.2143 0.05077 98 81 13 4
2540 I can't seem to escape my problems...they just follow me wherever I go. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2541 Your 55 minutes times 3 are up. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2542 One at a time now -- how is your relationship with your mother? 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2543 I see. How do you feel about that, and that, and that? 1.2143 0.05077 98 81 13 4
2544 Will that be three separate checks or just one ? 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2545 Who's first? 1.2143 0.05077 98 81 13 4
2546 Did you read the Groupon fine print? 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2547 These GROUPON deals are getting ridiculous 1.2143 0.04412 98 78 19 1
2548 How do you feel about my new furniture 1.2143 0.05077 98 81 13 4
2549 Lisa you are above this. Gary you can only go up from here. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2550 I guess we are gathered here today because Sally's bedwetting problems are really stacking up. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2551 Multi-level marketing therapy starts with establishing your level of involvement. 1.2143 0.04412 98 78 19 1
2552 Who else, who else feels alone? 1.2143 0.05077 98 81 13 4
2553 I didn’t think psychology camp would make us bunk up. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2554 First of all, welcome to discount Mondays! 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2555 Now that you've experienced mindfulness, you may return to your SAT exams.” 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2556 I don't want to hear any whining, Jeff. When you get better insurance, you can have the top bunk. Now, where were we? 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2557 Think of it as a stacked bar graph and please don't all talk at once. 1.2143 0.05077 98 81 13 4
2558 You’ll still each owe me your individual copays. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2559 Tell me about your Camp Mother. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2560 We're going to make you one again. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2561 As your new therapist I am required to thank you for accepting the new group insurance policy... 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2562 Does it relieve or increase your anxiety to know that I ordered this from Nikea, a Chinese knock-off that only prints assembly instructions in Mandarin? 1.2143 0.05077 98 81 13 4
2563 You should've looked at the fine print when you signed up for low-cost mental health coverage. Now, regarding your mothers. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2564 I understand you didn't want to go there, but you are in a ShrinkPOOL. 1.2143 0.05077 98 81 13 4
2565 Well, birth order is a quantifiable thing, get over it. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2566 Life isn't a competition. If you show me you understand that maybe you can be the one on top the next session. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2567 From where I’m sitting, it looks like things are looking up for you. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2568 Manhattan parking attendant, why do you ask? 1.2143 0.04412 98 78 19 1
2569 Three really is a crowd! 1.2143 0.05077 98 81 13 4
2570 You say Amzon makes you feel small and undervalued. Is that because you deserve it? 1.2143 0.03626 98 79 19 0
2571 And what was it about sleep-away camp that you feel traumatized you? 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2572 My approach might seem unconventional, but no one has managed to debunk my success. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2573 It's clear you're suffering from repressed anxieties over your berth order. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2574 Athos, Porthos and Aramis, let's start from the beginning." 1.2143 0.05280 98 82 11 5
2575 Managed care of the future. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2576 I think we really covered a lot today... that concludes groupon therapy . 1.2143 0.04412 98 78 19 1
2577 Tracy, if you could stick to discussing your political anxieties, it would help everyone get helpful counsel. 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2578 And how did that Groupon purchase make you feel? 1.2143 0.04644 98 79 17 2
2579 So tell me, which on of you is undecided? 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2580 If you wanted individual sessions, you shouldn't have booked online with 'TherapyDeal.com' 1.2143 0.04412 98 78 19 1
2581 As you may have guessed, my practice is strictly limited to clients in a menage a trois. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2582 I'd encourage y'all to reflect on the thought processes that brought you into my office today. Number One: Assuming that "Group Therapy" and "Groupon Therapy" were one and the same..... 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2583 Complimentary breakfast and therapy at Betty's Bay Area Hostel 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2584 Group therapy only works if everyone admits they're on the same level. 1.2121 0.04602 99 79 17 2
2585 Alright, next week John gets the top bunk. 1.2121 0.04130 99 78 21 0
2586 There's no 'I' in throuple's therapy. 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2587 Is this OK? We could also go by age or perhaps IQ. 1.2121 0.05030 99 82 13 4
2588 These Groupons are getting ridiculous. 1.2121 0.04130 99 78 21 0
2589 I’m sorry, but I have to do everything in multiples of three. 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2590 So, there have been some budget cuts 1.2121 0.04372 99 79 19 1
2591 Now which one of you is it that has the fear of heights? 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2592 Tell me how you first began triangulating. 1.2121 0.05231 99 83 11 5
2593 Which of you is the middle child? 1.2121 0.04130 99 78 21 0
2594 Before we get started, I am obliged to tell you that the pre-authorization by your respective insurance plans is not a guarantee of payment for this service. 1.2121 0.05030 99 82 13 4
2595 We all have the same issues. 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 16 2
2596 So how does that make you and your other identities feel? 1.2121 0.04372 99 79 19 1
2597 Yes, depression is most definitely hereditary. 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2598 Remind me, again... Who's having the problem with drugs and who's having the issues with authority? 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2599 Oy vey 1.2121 0.04372 99 79 19 1
2600 Yes, most insurance covers group therapy as well as sprained ankles." 1.2121 0.05231 99 83 11 5
2601 Thank you for taking advantage of our Groupon promotion. 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2602 We make the profit and you get the discount. 1.2121 0.05030 99 82 13 4
2603 Your previous therapist’s method has been debunked 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2604 So, do you have the 3 for 1 Groupon? 1.2121 0.04372 99 79 19 1
2605 Sorry, my last appointment was cellmate group therapy 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2606 Emotional support is much like Trickle Down Economics. 1.2121 0.05030 99 82 13 4
2607 Well if you had taken the time to read the brochure carefully you would have seen that it clearly states "threerapy." 1.2121 0.05030 99 82 13 4
2608 So far, none of you are stacking up. 1.2121 0.04372 99 79 19 1
2609 Do you have a strong support system? 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2610 Yes, the goal of Group Therapy is to be able to share our feelings. However, Louise, I don't think it helps to argue over whose turn it is for the lower couch. 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2611 Kevin, Randall, Kate, I'm sorry. This is our last session. Your stories just don't make me cry anymore. 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2612 After this session, you’ll have the opportunity to rate your experience and to leave an optional tip. 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2613 Yes, it IS group therapy but you still must respond in order. Now, starting from the top...Miss Franklin? 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2614 So remind me Are you the group with separation anxiety or economic fixations over group discounts? 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2615 You each have intimacy issues; my rent just went through the roof. Work with me, people, work with me! 1.2121 0.04003 99 80 18 1
2616 Relationship therapy for the modern love-triangle 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2617 OK, let's begin this initial free association group therapy session. 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2618 Not all together, PLEASE! 1.2121 0.05030 99 82 13 4
2619 Why do you say Mom was on top ? 1.2121 0.04372 99 79 19 1
2620 The king size is only available if you pay out of pocket. 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2621 Welcome to the family therapy support group 1.2121 0.05231 99 83 11 5
2622 I think you will find my experimental hybrid of group and individual therapy very helpful. 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2623 I heard psychiatry was bunk, doc, but I never expected this. 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2624 Who knew group therapy would be this relaxing? 1.2121 0.04602 99 80 17 2
2625 So you don't believe that Freudian psychoanalysis has been debunked. 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2626 I'm your camp counselor. 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2627 Have you tried talking to Mr. Roper? 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2628 It would help if all three of you had the same issue... 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2629 Welcome to therapy pool. 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2630 And finally... let's hear from you in the middle 1.2105 0.04463 95 76 18 1
2631 Now Eric, why do you think you deserve the top bunk? 1.2105 0.04463 95 76 18 1
2632 Ed, stop - you're superego NEXT week. 1.2105 0.04463 95 76 18 1
2633 I think there was a misunderstanding. I suggested we could use more *patience* in these sessions. 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2634 Welcome all to our introductory session in the Safe Practice of Ménage à Trois. 1.2105 0.05161 95 79 12 4
2635 And what about you number two,Do you feel the same as either number one or number three? 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2636 We're here to debunk your individual victimhood theories 1.2105 0.05161 95 79 12 4
2637 Okay, when Mom broke up the pillow fight, how did that make you feel? 1.2105 0.04463 95 76 18 1
2638 Become One! 1.2105 0.05161 95 79 12 4
2639 So to recap, you feel like the walls are closing in? Or just the ceiling and floors? 1.2105 0.05161 95 79 12 4
2640 Okay, that concludes today's session and Costco closes in fifteen minutes if you need mayonnaise or a big screen TV? Jodi Felton, Los Gatos, Ca 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2641 I'm sorry, but each of your 16.666 minutes are up. We'll have to continue this next week. 1.2105 0.04940 95 78 14 3
2642 We will focus on self confidence today...which one of you is Anna? 1.2105 0.04940 95 78 14 3
2643 ... on the other hand, you save on the co-pay. 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2644 Groupon therapy sessions 30٪ off 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2645 Next time we’ll all contemplate our bare toes, then go out for a nice group pedicure. 1.2105 0.05578 95 81 8 6
2646 And yes, it’s time to discuss the codependent issues in the room... 1.2105 0.04205 95 75 20 0
2647 Before we get started, which of you had the Groupon? 1.2105 0.05161 95 79 12 4
2648 Just so you know, the Groupon rate is only good for the first session. 1.2105 0.04463 95 76 18 1
2649 The group on current political affairs just left, so you're on climate change, right? 1.2105 0.05161 95 79 12 4
2650 I'd call them characters, John, but I'm not really sure they're personalities. 1.2105 0.04463 95 76 18 1
2651 Tell me why you asked for the group rate. 1.2105 0.04205 95 75 20 0
2652 You said you had a three for one coupon? 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2653 Your reticence is counterproductive to our goals at summer therapy camp. 1.2105 0.05161 95 79 12 4
2654 Thanks for booking through our new Session Share app 1.2105 0.05161 95 79 12 4
2655 Tell me how you feel when your health insurance doesn't come close to covering the cost of a 1-on-1 therapy session. 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2656 Fear of heights, groups and tight places all in one session. Hello B.M.W. 1.2105 0.04940 95 78 14 3
2657 Id, please stop interrupting down there. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2658 Welcome to the Beta test site for Medicare For All. 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2659 This therapy works on so many levels. 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2660 What were you expecting from a group discount? 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2661 I thought "the 3 for one special," ment 3 sessions for the price of 1 never dreaming it would be like this....Im just not comfortable. 1.2100 0.04984 100 83 13 4
2662 I don't understand why I have to be in the middle of their arguments. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2663 So, tell me, why is that you think you’re always caught in the middle? 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2664 How do we really feel about Medicare for All? 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2665 Okay, I know I am not permitted to have an opinion, but finally a woman on top!! 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2666 Is it safe to assume you grew up in a dependent household ? 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2667 I think perhaps you've been watching too much "This Is Us". . . 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2668 The treatment is called de-bunking your fear of heights. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2669 What a great way to overcome isolation anxiety, huh? 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2670 Ok!? Bachelor No.3, same question! 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2671 Thank you for filling out your Groupon profiles. Let's start by talking about your mother, YOUR mother and your priest. 1.2100 0.05183 100 84 11 5
2672 So Eva, how does that make you feel? And Robert, please expand. And Justin, why do you think your friends don't want to see you? 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2673 Unfortunately, I overbooked this session. Would any of you be willing to be bumped until next February? 1.2100 0.05183 100 84 11 5
2674 As you have discovered, throuples can be quite complicated. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2675 I suppose we should start by discussing why you spent 30 minutes arguing over who got which bunk. 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2676 Looks like another case of multiple personality has come in. 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2677 Really, Sarah, we need to work on your tendency to over-share. 1.2100 0.04333 100 80 19 1
2678 That bugle call your are hearing is called Reveille, ignore that, it is intended for and entirely different group. Now Charles... you were saying....... 1.2100 0.04984 100 83 13 4
2679 HOW DID YOU TWO GET UP THERE? 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2680 Well, maybe it's better you sleep separately. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2681 So, whose idea was "polyamory dorm"? 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2682 How do you feel about how you feel how you feel how you feel? 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2683 OK. My new order of questioning will be based on gender, race and ethnicity. 1.2100 0.04984 100 83 13 4
2684 No one said group therapy was equally elevating. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2685 Bachelor Number Two, tell me about your mother. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2686 So Tammy likes Tim, but Tim doesn’t know Tom likes Tammy who also likes Tim? 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2687 Susan, tell me about your vaginal itch. 1.2100 0.05183 100 84 11 5
2688 I see....obviously you all suffer from the classic SLPCKN (Stackable Lounge Piece Coo Koo Napping) syndrome. No cure freaks. 1.2100 0.04560 100 80 17 2
2689 As long as Sally chose to have you boys staring up at her backside, we can continue. 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2690 Now Fred, how of others in the family responded to your pregnancy? 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2691 I find this exercise to be most effective when I leave it to each of you to figure out whether you’re the one in need of some perspective. 1.2100 0.04984 100 83 13 4
2692 Well, yes, I did say tears are encouraged here but... 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2693 You have all chosen the Pool option of Uber Shrinks, anybody in a rush to speak first? 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2694 You asked for the discounted rate. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2695 Wait so your telling me that all three of you are pregnant 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2696 Anyone? 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2697 Paying off student loans isn’t very comfortable for me either. 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2698 First, which one of you has the dreams of falling off a cliff? 1.2095 0.04822 105 87 14 4
2699 There are three tiers of recovery. We'll take them one at a time. 1.2083 0.04422 96 77 18 1
2700 You have an extremely advanced case of multiple personality disorder. 1.2083 0.05112 96 80 12 4
2701 Kathryn, you're very distant today. 1.2043 0.05418 93 79 9 5
2702 Contestant #1, if i was your therapist, what would you tell me about your mother? 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2703 Think of this as going coach “ Bo Hirsch, Los Angeles, Calif 1.2043 0.05630 93 80 7 6
2704 Yeah, Freud got you into this mess, but did he say which one of you is supposed to pay the bill? 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2705 Sandra, do I need to remind you again that "therapy-pool" match up with other clients heading in the same psychosis. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2706 Bottom bunk, Why do you think you feel you’re not special?” 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2707 It takes just a few moments to get acclimated and you'll be able to enter the IKEA without freaking out. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2708 You can talk simultaneously, I anyway never listened to you. 1.2043 0.04473 93 75 17 1
2709 I've already told you, I'm not that kind of counselor 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2710 I don’t know why, but it always feels like other people are above me. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2711 Today we will discuss how layers affect our sense of well being. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2712 I can triple charge for the session, it's great! 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2713 So who thinks group therapy is bunk? 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2714 Tell me about your Mother Triplex 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2715 She prefers being on top? 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2716 Which one of you broke wind just now? 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2717 I think this will only worsen the feeling that you’re living in their shadows. 1.2043 0.04473 93 75 17 1
2718 Remember, Charlie, the ego always gets the middle couch. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2719 Congratulations on your free mental healthcare coverage! You each have 30 seconds. 1.2043 0.04473 93 75 17 1
2720 Yes, I’m still honoring our ‘Buy Two Get One Free’ deal. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2721 And how did the Groupon offer make you feel? 1.2043 0.04473 93 75 17 1
2722 Alright, Bachelor No. 2, what are your deepest fears? 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2723 So remind me, in London on the triple decker bus, who was on top? 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2724 Is this anyone’s first Uber Pool session? 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2725 We will now imagine a placid lake, and sing a rousing rendition of “Row Your Boat” in the round. 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2726 Now Judy, can you think of any reasons your friends might think you are too thrifty? 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2727 I like to separate the Id, the Ego, and the Super Ego. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2728 You all would feel a lot better without this group-think thing. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2729 Blame it on Bernie Sanders 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2730 Victim #3. Do you agree with victim #2 and victim #1 that your whole life you have felt like a face in the crowd and never been seen as a unique ,worthy individual. 1.2043 0.04473 93 75 17 1
2731 Thank you for choosing “Therapy For The People,” there is a suggestion $5 donation on your way out. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2732 And Kyle, how would you respond if a complete stranger had tasted your porridge? 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2733 The moment the psychologist realized that the "Therapy Camp for Kids" franchise was a scam.... 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2734 Okay, Brian you start by talking about your mother, then Kevin, you talk about your father, and then Sarah, you talk about Brian's father and Kevin's mother. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2735 Let’s all work together on beating this President , so our lives can get back to normal 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2736 Sometimes I just feel like everyone else is beneath me 1.2043 0.04473 93 75 17 1
2737 I can't promise that my advice will apply to all of you, but I can still pretend to listen just as easily as before. 1.2043 0.04473 93 75 17 1
2738 Thank you bottom bed.........middle bed same question. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2739 There is no reason to feel self conscious. This is just part of our new all inclusive one on one therapy sessions" 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2740 Stop complaining! I'm the only family therapist in town with discount sessions. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2741 You go first. No, you go first. No, you go first. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2742 Yes, all at once. 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2743 Just think of it as the therapy version of riding coach. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2744 Thank you all for signing up for my Therapy Groupon. 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2745 Instead of raising a class warfare, bottom guy just lies there dispassionately. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2746 For the First Place Medal in Therapy the question is: Did Skinner ever have dinner with Dr.Freud or Dr.Seuss? 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2747 Rejoice you insomniacs, I will now read from Don Jr’s book. The last 3 patients were snoozing after the table of contents. 1.2043 0.05418 93 79 9 5
2748 I DETECT A HIERARCHY TO THIS MÉNAGE À TROIS 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2749 Bachelor number two. Say I love you in your sexiest voice. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2750 I try to take a three pronged approach to therapy, though some of my colleagues tend to debunk that theory. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2751 Let's begin with you, Superego. 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2752 That's not what I meant by multitasking. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2753 And how does that make the collective you feel? 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2754 Great, now tell me less about that... 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2755 Let's take this again from the top. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2756 Let's not make every session about my new business model . . . now, remind me again, which of you spontaneously ejaculates in group settings? 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2757 I blame your parents. 1.2043 0.04204 93 74 19 0
2758 So, tell me more about this dream of being a sandwich. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2759 Problems stack up. 1.2043 0.04473 93 75 17 1
2760 This way, I can deal with multiple persons and personalities at the same time. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2761 Well,now that you are all settled,I am glad that you could bring your own couch. 1.2021 0.04682 94 77 15 2
2762 Yes Sally, I've seen the movie Sybil. Why do you ask? 1.2021 0.04920 94 78 13 3
2763 At $100 an hour, you shoulda thought that before you climbed up there. 1.2021 0.04920 94 78 13 3
2764 Now, can any of you tell me why you're here? 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
2765 So you wanted a threesome—how does this make you feel? 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2766 Patient number one. What would you say? 1.1978 0.04996 91 76 12 3
2767 A new, highly efficient, parallelized therapy. 1.1978 0.04996 91 76 12 3
2768 If you wanted to speak to me alone you should have chosen an Uber Therapy X. 1.1978 0.04480 91 74 16 1
2769 The health insurance sector has taken a page from the airline industry and "economized" services in order to satisfy investors and executives. Oh, and from now on, the pillow is extra. 1.1974 0.05626 76 64 9 3
2770 My accountant told me I needed to rack up more patients. 1.1974 0.04963 76 62 13 1
2771 GOOD NEWs...NO FIRE... NO OCOTT MORRISON... BUT | WANT THAT CHEESE #NOVEGAN 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2772 Wait, which one of you has a fear of heights? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2773 Despite appearances, psychoanalysis isn't bunk. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2774 Let's start with the first time you went to a family camp. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2775 That’s all for today. Next time, the one on top needs to remember to bring the ladder. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2776 O.K., Kevin, you can be Ego. Now, who wants to be Superego? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2777 What I'm interpreting your comments as meaning, Bill, is that you always feel stuck in the middle of their fights. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2778 My diagnosis is multiple personality disorder. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2779 Welcome to Throuple's Therapy" 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2780 Absolutely, a fear of loneliness can be overcome. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2781 Coronavirus anxiety has tripled my appointments - thank you for agreeing to a shared sesssion. 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2782 It's not gay if it's a 3 way - it's the Golden Rule. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2783 What about 'co-pay' did you not understand? 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2784 This is what they call a Freudian sleeep 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2785 Not only is therapy share more economical, you may just realize your problems aren't as bad as you think. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2786 So tell me about this Mod Squid complex 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2787 The 'Top tier psychoanalysis' advertisement is a bit misleading 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2788 This transition from individual to group therapy will only take 5 or 6 sessions. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2789 All right , all together, tell me about your mother. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2790 More people than you think suffer from “This Is Us” Syndrome. 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2791 What did you expect when I advertised two thirds off the standard hourly fees? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2792 I hope you all understand that this was the only way I could help everyone in the Los Angeles area. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2793 No. I won't bill you on a 'three-for-one' basis. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2794 How did you feel about always being the one in the middle? 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2795 Do you all feel equal now? 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2796 Seems like it all started at that youth hostel. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2797 Same name? Same history? I think this is a case of single personality disorder. 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2798 Three Layer Catharsis 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2799 My psychosis cases are really beginning to stack up 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2800 Let’s begin with how your ‘high-deductible’ plan makes you feel. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2801 Groupon is not ideal for me either, so which one of you thinks there is a monster under your bed? 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2802 Accept it, live it - life is a bed of tiers. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2803 I suppose none of you read the fine print on your Groupon. Why do you think that is? 1.1954 0.05626 87 75 7 5
2804 Try to reach a consensus. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2805 No, my methods have not been debunked. 1.1954 0.04276 87 70 17 0
2806 Are these tiers our lifetime assignments? 1.1954 0.04276 87 73 13 1
2807 21st c. menage a trois. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2808 This isn’t exactly what I meant when I said a threesome could spice up your marriage. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2809 How do you feel about stacked parking? 1.1954 0.04276 87 73 10 2
2810 As I explained, this is the Mike Pence form of group therapy 1.1954 0.04276 87 72 14 1
2811 Throuple Therapy is on the rise. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2812 How long have you had multiple personalities? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2813 "So you have a fear of not fitting in?" 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2814 Given your diversity, I need to insure equal access to all bunks for each of you. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2815 Let's discuss your feelings about managed care. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2816 Which one of you is the fear-of-heights patient? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2817 We split your co-pay three ways. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2818 Remind me, whose turn is it to go first? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2819 Kevin, I know we said this is a safe, judgment-free space, but Lisa and I were talking and we both think your oversharing is creepy and weird. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2820 Would you like me to split the bill 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2821 Forget elf on the shelf, introducing sad sacks on a rack. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2822 Recent studies show that the middle child often feels the most confined by his siblings. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2823 Welcome to group therapy in Manhattan. 1.1954 0.04276 87 70 17 0
2824 No, I don't have a safety bar. This is not camp. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2825 When did you realize your life story was not unique? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2826 This might be the worst case of multiple personality disorder I have ever seen . 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2827 You aren't the first siblings who have had "pecking order" issues. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2828 Let’s begin this by hierarchy of needs! 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2829 I warn you, Triples Therapy is still a new concept. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2830 I don't know if this is the best way to handle your codependency issues? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2831 This is a safe space in which to get out of your comfort zone. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2832 Don't worry; I've treated lots of cases like yours! You might even say that Multiple Personality Disorder is my specialty. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2833 John, You May now speak for 60 seconds and please no more complaints about quality of care under Medicare for All. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2834 Welcome everybody. Let’s meet this week’s America’s Got Talented Neurotics and Psychotics. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2835 Group regression 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2836 Bob, if you wanted to dominate the conversation, you shouldn't have signed up for my Thursday Therapy Three-fer. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2837 Welcome to the,’ A lot of Bunk’ session. 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2838 I've heard of a layered subconscious, but this is getting out of hand! 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2839 Yes, based off of the most recent Democratic debate it looks like Donald Trump will be president for four more years. 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2840 This IS the new discount PLAN! Now! All together....... 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2841 Just remember that counseling is like a three way street...... 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2842 Correct, number three! Now ... buzzers ready for another question about mothers. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2843 I'm running late and a little stacked up. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2844 I know your relationship is complicated, but you won't believe who's pregnant 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2845 OK, Brittanie, your turn. How come YOU blame your mother for the college dorm overcrowding? 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2846 How did you feel about summer camp? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2847 Sorry, but this is how the "buy one, get two free" special works. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2848 Welcome to our new Pillow Talk therapy (PTT) program—let’s start from the top. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2849 Don't worry, the answer's always the mother 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2850 Do you ever fell overshadowed by your multiple personalities? 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2851 all three of you believed Bill O’Reilly!!??? 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2852 She was out of Network. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2853 You all fear the online echo chamber that defines modern society. How does that make you feel, feel, feel? 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2854 At the count of three, shift berths and may the best inner child win. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2855 Your recent Caption Contest entries were ranked, in descending order: UNFUNNY SOMEWHAT FUNNY FUNNY Let’s discuss. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2856 I understand your reluctance, but you did ask for the group rate. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2857 And how do you feel about the “Buy one get two free” situation? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2858 One pill, two pill, red pill, blue pill—what brought you each here? 1.1954 0.04276 87 70 17 0
2859 Before we get started, I’ll need your group plan number. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2860 Now, please understand that if you have different diagnoses then that nullifies your three-for-one discount. Let's begin... 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2861 Who has the marginalization issue? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2862 It's a new startup: a cross between pod shares and group therapy. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2863 Ok. Who wants to go first? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2864 Well. this is the new tri-care insurance option. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2865 Tell me again why you don't feel special. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2866 So dormitory life hasn't been everything you'd hoped for 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2867 For the full discount, please answer in unison. 1.1954 0.05626 87 75 7 5
2868 I don't want any of you to think that the objective of this innovative group therapy is merely a way for me to maximize my billable hours. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2869 And Bachelor Number Three, what dose of Prozac do you take? 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2870 Ego, Superego, how does hearing Id say that make you feel? 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2871 It's my opinion that yes, you do have multiple personalities. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2872 Let's discuss your intimacy issues. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2873 OK, so who had the bed wetting issue again? 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2874 I can offer even better rates if you book through TherapyPool 'XL' next time. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2875 Per HIPA guidelines you are not allowed to listen when other patients are talking. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2876 Welcome to our pilot private/group session. Instead of your names I'll refer to you as Lower, Middle & Upper. Let's begin. 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2877 In your case, I think multiple personalities would be preferable 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2878 When the odds are stacked before you, where do you begin? 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2879 Who wants to talk first about your family’s hierarchy? 1.1954 0.04276 87 70 17 0
2880 Well...our feelings about social status can often be considered on several levels. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2881 I discovered I could combine the counselor's office with your detention hour so that I can beat traffic. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2882 Falling dreams again Martha? Switch with Jack. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2883 So, when we last spoke we were discussing your fear of closed spaces . . . 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2884 Triplex syndrome is treatable but let’s get the alpha couch problem out in the open. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2885 Yeah, we all have the same complaints. 1.1954 0.04276 87 70 17 0
2886 So, tell me, why exactly is it that the top bunk is the best 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2887 I'm afraid the three of you are far too neurotic to work at this Crate and Barrel. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2888 I'm not sure which one of you said that, but I will be reporting it. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2889 What do you think I meant by "Group Therapy"? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2890 Alex; you say everything and everyone is ‘bunk’. Where do you think that comes from? 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2891 Just remember these rates expire on April 30th 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2892 Let's talk about why you think group therapy is bunk. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2893 This takes multiple personalities to a whole new level. 1.1954 0.04276 87 70 17 0
2894 Oh, get a grip, people! I'm not exactly burnishing my reputation here, y'know. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2895 See, I told you things could be worse 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2896 Not only do you get the group rate, but this way I can treat your acrophobia, claustrophobia, and taphophobia at the same time 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2897 Question #4, for 15 points: if you dream about being followed, what does it mean? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2898 I really hope you guys are not friends or related before we begin to talk in this therapy. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2899 Before we start the session I will need each of you to show me your Groupon coupon. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2900 Can you tell me again which one of you dreamed you were the tomato in a BLT? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2901 It’s part of the new “health care for all” plan. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2902 So, you would say the wedding cake business is uniquely stressful? 1.1954 0.05626 87 75 7 5
2903 Welcome to your first session of Groupon therapy. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2904 Just be happy I take your insurance 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2905 This isn’t the type of threesome I was thinking of... 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2906 It's important to address the Id, Ego and Superego at the same time. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2907 Well, this is a lofty situation. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2908 When did you begin feeling this sense of insignificance? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2909 Office space is at a premium, so I've started hot bunking patients. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2910 So in what ways has this person come between the two of you? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2911 I think you guys should all try and look each other in the eyes when you're talking. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2912 OK, let's start from the top with the Id. Mrs Smith, what brings you here today. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2913 First, let's address your bed wetting issues 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2914 And you said you got this on Groupon? 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2915 Let's start by splitting the 50 minutes equitably. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2916 So much for debunked psychoanalytic theories. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2917 What I’m hearing is that this ménage a trois has a woman on top? Finally! 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2918 But where is mo? 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2919 I know these Groupon deals can get weird... 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2920 Tell me again why you struggled at summer camp. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2921 How long have you felt that the show "This is Us" was written about you? 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2922 ok so tell me how the polyamorous relationship is going?... let's start with you in the middle this time... 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2923 And how long have you felt like you were in a New Yorker? 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2924 We'll get more done this way. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2925 A day in the life, of a serial therapist. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2926 My professional interpretation is an obvious case of Middle Child Syndrome. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2927 Now, which one of your personalities is having Daddy issues? 1.1954 0.04578 87 72 12 2
2928 Afraid of snakes - zero. Now raise your hand if you live in constant despair of the dark abyss that is your daily existence. 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2929 Why do you still feel lonely? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2930 Well Sarah, with my radical new therapy, we'll be able to address your fear of heights and your bed-wetting problem at the same time. 1.1954 0.04861 87 71 13 2
2931 Our three for one special only lasts one month. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2932 OK, we start at the top. Maggie, now what brings you here today? 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2933 Look folks, I am doing my best to work with your HMO's 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2934 Now that we have gender sorted out, let’s work on ethnicity. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2935 I figured it would be easier to get the ones with daddy issues over with in one go. 1.1954 0.04276 87 71 13 1
2936 I guess I always feel like the middleman. 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
2937 Seat 8E - has 8F ever done anything to lose your trust? 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2938 But doc I told you I had a fear of the bottom bunk 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2939 I have noticed that you three always tier up during group therapy? 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
2940 The new HMO shared health services plan. 1.1954 0.04276 87 70 17 0
2941 Doc, I think I'm an egomaniac. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
2942 As I explained, it's triple the analysis for a third of the price. 1.1954 0.04276 87 70 17 0
2943 So what is it about the septuagenarian from Vermont that you find so appealing 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
2944 I find it streamlines the process of revisiting childhood trauma. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2945 First off, I don't typically do group therapy, but you all listed the fear of other people finding out about your fear of collapsing bunk beds on your intake forms. Secondly, if anyone knows how to anchor these things to the wall... 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2946 What is the problem from your perspectives? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2947 And how does that make y’all feel? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2948 So... tell me about your mothers. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2949 When did you first realize that you had multiple personalities? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2950 Good news: the other two people are real. Bad news: your insurance isn't. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2951 Show of hands. Who wants to talk about their mother? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2952 starting from the top 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2953 Eenie, meenie, miney, mo. . . 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2954 There's definitely some serious under-lying pathology here. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2955 Of course you're feeling scattered, Sybil. Just give us a moment to wheel in your other personalities. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2956 The bonus of the Group-On Therapy is that you not only learn about your issues but those of others as well. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2957 Hopefully we will get to the bottom of this. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2958 Thanks for signing up for our 3-for-1 special. 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2959 No extra charge for being late...I was able to go shopping and use my coupons. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2960 I see. And how did that make you feel? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2961 Is this really about who's turn it is to do the dishes? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2962 Is this a "This is Us" situation? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2963 How to start a therapy practice in a Manhattan studio 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2964 The world's first Three-apist 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2965 Number Three: How old were you when you found out that your mother liked your brother better than she liked you? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2966 a therapy session for compulsive liers 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2967 BTW, The top bunk get first dibs on the fire exit plan. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2968 Before we start with our first group therapy session for bed wetters, does anyone have any questions? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2969 So you're having trouble agreeing on a democratic nominee? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2970 You're suffering from multiple personalities? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2971 How do you two feel about not having to climb the ladder anymore? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2972 Yes, we’re talking about your ego, but this isn’t all about YOU. 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
2973 Discount Therapy 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2974 There’s no rent ceiling so we can probably fit another. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2975 How many insights do I get with this Groupon? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2976 The second story is different form the first story so we will listen to the third story. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2977 The family that lays together stays together. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2978 Our practice is based on the airline industry model 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2979 I’m pretty sure this is how Metallica did it. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 1
2980 Excuse my roommates. 1.1932 0.05075 88 73 11 3
2981 I really don't care that you called "top bunk", Mr. Smith. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2982 The topic is lack and despair. Who would like to share? 1.1932 0.04810 88 72 12 2
2983 You are stacked in order of sanity, however I will not be divulging if this is top down or bottom up. Jim, since you are bi-polar I put you in the middle. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2984 We are still waiting to see if one more family member has demonstrated enough problems in order to participate. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2985 I don't think this Groupon therapy is working. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2986 Congratulations! Each one of you is a pioneer in Diversity Therapy, besides paying only one-third of the usual cost! 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
2987 I remind Patient 1 that assignment to top berth in this office is no assurance of the same station in life. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2988 The id, the ego and the super-ego 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2989 Let’s go over your feelings today, from top to bottom. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2990 Who wants to be id, ego, super-ego? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2991 Please tell me again: how soon after your marriage did you receive the 23 and Me results? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2992 So, how do you feel about your insurance coverage? 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
2993 Despite your relationship, you each pay full price. 1.1932 0.04531 88 71 14 1
2994 I'm hoping you three've worked out some sort of buddy system since last summer. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2995 Yes, 'This is Us' did quite a number on all of us. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2996 First, let's discuss why you chose the group discount 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2997 All right John, it's your turn to be the tomato. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2998 On the bright side, I'll give you a bulk rate. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2999 Who ate all the peanut butter this time? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3000 Hopefully we can debunk this recurring notion of multiple personalities. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3001 Clearly, this is a case of multiple personalities. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3002 Your group counseling sessions are really beginning to stack up!! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3003 The Beauty of our Economy Therapy Session is that the discussion continues during the carpool ride home 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
3004 Your fondness for Navy Shipboard life is getting a bit extreme! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3005 I don't care if you're this is us. This is me is still charging you $300.00 an hour. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3006 We'll call it an hour, each. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3007 Which one of you has the multiple personality syndrome? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3008 The 3-for1 Special. . . . 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3009 My job is to unpick the layers in what you say, see what meaning is couched in you words, Freud believed the number three .... 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3010 How do you feel now that the power dynamics have shifted and you are top bunk? 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
3011 So, Jessica, you tweeted out your support for a candidate and these random men responded what again? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3012 It says here that I won the family therapy trifecta! 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
3013 This is a the only therapy concept that has not yet been debunked. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
3014 Amazon said it treats acrophobia, middle child syndrome, and fear of a building collapsing in on itself. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3015 All your issues are multi-level 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3016 For the last time, there’s no such thing as middle patient syndrome. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
3017 Don't blame me. I'm not the one that bought insurance from Groupon. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
3018 This way you each only play a third of my usual psychiatrist's fee." 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3019 Yes, he's still your dad, and no, he isn't pregnant. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3020 Does group therapy mean I always have to be on the bottom? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
3021 Let's explore how using a groupon should not always a be group activity. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
3022 This is NOT what Goldilocks had in mind ! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3023 Don't worry, this isn't the first triple psychosis I've treated! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3024 And may I ask, where did you learn of our 3-for-1 sale? 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
3025 Glad I had enough room to fit you all in for one appointment. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3026 Alright, I’ll scan those Groupons whenever you’re ready. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3027 I am not a fan of group therapy, but I use a modified approach where one-on-one sessions show no improvement. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3028 This is the last time I buy Groupon for therapy. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3029 Never thought I'd be into Threesome Therapy... 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3030 One-on-one therapy? In this economy? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3031 I'm sorry if neither of you read the fine print for my 3 for 1 Groupon session. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3032 This is part of my new "Just get on with it!" therapy. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3033 I know you're all new to group therapy, so I decided I'd ease you in. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
3034 This would be much more personal if you were facing me. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3035 Let’s explore why you feel nobody sees you as an individual. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3036 Session for fear of confining spaces or psychotherapists tripling their money in an hour? 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
3037 I think we're going to need to go deeper... bottom bunk 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3038 Don't be alarmed, I've put the most stable on the bottom. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3039 Can I get a Do, Re, Mi?” 1.1928 0.04681 83 68 14 1
3040 A Folie a trois 1.1910 0.04761 89 74 13 2
3041 $120 an hr. x 3 divided by 1/3 = Triple The Time Off 1.1910 0.04485 89 73 15 1
3042 To begin, how is work release turning out for you? 1.1910 0.04761 89 74 13 2
3043 That's an interesting point Linc... what makes your squad mod? 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
3044 Welcome to Acrophobia Anonymous. 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3045 Being sent to summer camp does not mean that your parents don't love you. 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3046 Sure, the insurance policy is cheaper, but I hate their group coverage 1.1882 0.04582 85 70 14 1
3047 I’d like to start by thanking you for using Therapy Pool 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3048 Don’t turn around. I don’t want your face to influence my sperm donor decision. 1.1882 0.04582 85 70 14 1
3049 What happens when a therapist lists a special on Groupon. 1.1882 0.04878 85 70 12 2
3050 Embrace the top Anne, we fought long and hard for this moment. 1.1882 0.05157 85 72 10 3
3051 Bipolar I can handle, but tripolar is a new one for me. 1.1882 0.04582 85 70 14 1
3052 Don't be self-conscious. I have extensive experience with male phantom pregnancies in threesomes. 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3053 And you get an extra 10% off the group rate if you bundle your neuroses. 1.1882 0.04582 85 70 14 1
3054 Tell me about each others' childhood. 1.1882 0.04265 85 69 16 0
3055 You should be aware that threesome therapy is often disappointing. 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3056 Family therapy done right 1.1882 0.05422 85 73 8 4
3057 OK, one by one, roll to the right or left, whichever you prefer, then we will discuss how you felt before you landed and after you hit the floor, and what those feelings evoked for you. 1.1882 0.05422 85 72 8 4
3058 New HMO requirements - after a couple sessions you won't even notice. 1.1882 0.04582 85 70 14 1
3059 You know the rules, Waldo. You keep acting snarky and you are going back to the bottom bunk. 1.1882 0.04582 85 70 14 1
3060 Wait let me get this strait. Jerry liked Pam but she started dating Rob. Then Rob broke Pam's Heart because he likes Jerry... wait... Please repeat. 1.1882 0.05157 85 72 10 3
3061 So what brings you to throuples therapy? 1.1860 0.04826 86 72 12 2
3062 Jane, I would strongly advise you not to drop out from treatment 1.1860 0.04826 86 72 12 2
3063 All of your times are up, but theirs are higher up. 1.1860 0.04826 86 72 12 2
3064 Higher ceilings we need higher ceilings. 1.1856 0.04476 97 81 11 3
3065 What did you expect when you chose the three-for-one discount? 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
3066 I think you may misunderstand what "group rate" means 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3067 CARLOS GHOSN FOUND A PLAN B AND WE ARE STUCK WITH THIS! 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3068 They made an enhancement to the maze right hand rule algorithm. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3069 Since you three think that psychiatry is “a load of bunk”... 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3070 Addiction to Uber pool riding can have residual effects. 1.1829 0.04296 82 69 11 1
3071 Hi. I'm your new therapist. You can call me Eve. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3072 Welcome to Uber therapy. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3073 Everyone seems to be regressing. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3074 So, all of you have felt personally victimized by Regina George? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3075 How does being a triplet make you feel? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3076 Ok Ricky, please elaborate a little more on why you think you're always below everyone else. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3077 This is what they might call the trifecta of the mind and soul. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3078 I apologize in advance, but these new Medicaid rules are what they are. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3079 And how does that make you feel top bunk? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3080 So, let's begin. As you know two is company however three is crowd sourcing. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3081 Contestant No. 2, how would you beat contestant No. 1‘s Oedipus problem? 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3082 This isn’t what I meant when I suggested you compartmentalize your interpersonal issues. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3083 Let’s first address the acrophobia, then the issue of being caught in the middle, and of course the fear that everything could crash down on you. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3084 You know, you don't have to let birth order rule your lives. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3085 As you may know, I specialize in family therapy... 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3086 At the count of three, you will rise, pick up your bed, and walk. 1.1829 0.05522 82 71 7 4
3087 Well one of you is going have to speak first 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3088 Do I need to review the earmuffs policy with anyone? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3089 Today, let's work on choosing which one to be. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3090 Emily and Scott, your time is up. Billy, you still have 10 minutes. In the future , all must arrive at the same time. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3091 So many levels to explore here... who wants to start first? 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3092 For insurance purposes, I am going to diagnose you with Dissociative Identity Disorder 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3093 Settle, get comfy, and welcome to Jenga therapy. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3094 For more dedicated care, please pay my full fee. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3095 Now that you are all settled in, we will discuss feminism, race issues and white supremacy. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3096 If you think I'm trying to maximize profits, that's just bunk... 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3097 Due to changes mandated to your insurance coverage, I have to make all of your treatments more cost effective. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3098 No, it's not multi-personalty disorder. You are different people. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3099 Have you tried turning off and on again? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3100 So, do you think having your own room growing up would've helped? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3101 Despite its promise to reduce costs for millennials, the practicality of Uber-pool style therapy sessions does not seem efficacious. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3102 Everything you say here is completely confidential. Now, Jimmy, tell me how Bobby's new girlfriend is 'destroying the crew'. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3103 I like to start on top 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3104 Harold, that sounds like a lot of bunk. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3105 I will only go for therapy if I can bring my friends! 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3106 So you'll be glad to know those aren't your multiple personalities, our clinic is moving towards multi-level marketing 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3107 You need to learn to value yourself. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3108 Of course I am going to ask you to forget what the others said because of professional secrecy. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3109 No. The Sybil group rate does not apply. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3110 Some Groupon deal, huh? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3111 So, how do you feel sleepaway camp has marginalized you? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3112 So, how did it feel to be the middle child? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3113 It's from Ikea, it took forever to build." 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3114 Tell me, how long have you hated each other's mothers? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 9 2
3115 I know you say youre an expert in Multiple Personalities... 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3116 Why do you feel so alone? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3117 This is the individual psychotherapy your insurance covers; please speak one at a time. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3118 Just bear with me, I’ve never had a threesome, either. 1.1829 0.05522 82 71 7 4
3119 No, I didn't overbook. You're just suffering from split personality disorder. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3120 Today we will focus on the mid-child syndrome 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3121 So tell me, is this group session helpful for your stranger danger anxiety? 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3122 I got the idea from my Uber Pool. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3123 Now, you'll all get your turn on the top bunk. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3124 You tend to think everyone is stacked up against you. What bunk! 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3125 Best Groupon deal ever" Robyn Stanton, Palo Alto, Ca 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3126 How will we be splitting the bill today? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3127 Who suggested you see me? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3128 Since you’re showing symptoms of tripolar anxiety, my fee will triple. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3129 How you’re feeling, one more time from the top. A five, six, seven, eight! 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3130 This is the worst case of multiple personality disorder I have ever seen. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3131 Yes, I will call you Winkin’, Blinkin’ and Nod. Now can you tell me about your trip? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3132 Bachelor #2. Why do you hate your mother? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3133 Tell me about your family. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3134 … and my therapist recommended multitasking! 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3135 Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, one of you is nuts 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3136 Interesting... Let's unstack that. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3137 This week, think about your mother but don't say anything. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3138 Other than that, how was Sybil as a mom? 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3139 Well, welcome to therapy summer camp! 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3140 And when did you first realize you have three personalities? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3141 Wow, you really do have multiple personalities. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3142 So, now that we’ve moved past your feelings on differentiation in teaching, what are your current levels of comfort regarding tiered instruction? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3143 I don't understand. You didn't have a problem with Uber Pool. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3144 Loise, you have 20 minutes. Go. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3145 How long have you been projecting these multiple personalities? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3146 Actually group therapy can be multilayered. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3147 I can split the bill but don’t change seats. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3148 Welcome to Democratic Socialism psychiatry session #1 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3149 Health care efficiencies reach new heights. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3150 Just so we're clear, group therapy does not mean group discounts. Each of you pays for an hour. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3151 We thought we were into polyamory but now we’re not so sure. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3152 I love my new group therapy couch from Ikea. I hope I got the bolts in correctly. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3153 Welcome to Jeopardy Analysis where you’ll get answers 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3154 Group Psychoanalysis. 1.1829 0.05789 82 72 5 5
3155 Wait, which one of you has a tendency to wet the bed? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3156 ...to answer your collective question, stacking appointments allows us to better service the higherarchy of my needs. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3157 I finally hit the trifecta! 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3158 Category, Catatonic for 20. 1.1829 0.05522 82 71 7 4
3159 I am sorry but your insurance does not cover the middle bunk 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3160 Yes, you do have multiple personalities. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3161 This is a toss-up question for Zack an Ed. Winner gets the bottom berth. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3162 Tell me more about your frustration with the copay... 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3163 welcome to the "bunker mentality group" 1.1829 0.04947 82 71 8 3
3164 What made you finally chose to go to throuple's counseling? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3165 Your daughter couldn't make it? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3166 How long have you been fantasizing about having a threesome, Doctor? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3167 So, tell me about your childhood. Twenty-five words or less. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3168 Couch # 2, Is your wife on-board with your pregnancy? 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3169 I think we should define the meaning of “multiple personalities.” 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3170 So, you suffer from multiple personality disorder? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3171 I know, but a trampoline would be cheaper. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3172 OK...welcome to the Affordable Care Act Wide Spectrum Multi Way Therapy... 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3173 And how does that make you feel... and you feel... and you feel? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3174 And in previous elections? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3175 I think you’ll find the pool rate worth it, even during surge times. If not, feel free to ask for your problems back. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3176 It worked for Sybil. Give it a try 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3177 Yes, this is how we do group therapy in juvie summer camp. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3178 And how does the sharing economy make you feel? 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3179 Welcome. You've signed on to our Super-Deal ... 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3180 I want your imaginary friends to be as comfortable as you. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3181 And when you open your eyes the three of you will escort Julian Assange on the JFK airtrain to his terminal. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3182 Let's begin by debunking some of your childhood beliefs... 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3183 Really??? No, that's each. I have student loans to pay 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3184 Now, Mark.. you’re gonna have to wait your turn. Tommy’s Medicaid applicationWas approve slightly before yours. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3185 Thank you for signing up for our February Blues 3-for the price of 1- counseling special. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3186 We've got to be on the level with each other. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3187 Maybe Uber Pool is not the best business model for a therapist. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3188 Let me see how fast you can change bunks 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3189 Yes,we've had some funding cuts. Now tell me about your childhoods. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3190 And they were roommates.....with problems.” Grace Hughes, Anna Pavlou, Yuelin Zhong, Baltimore, Maryland 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3191 Uh-Huh. Well, your time is up. So, which mattress is the most comfortable? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 12 1
3192 Now Id, you’re on the bottom, you’ll speak first 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3193 The Carvana Method 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3194 It's good to see you all back together again. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3195 I think it was clearly stated in the application for the family discount. 1.1829 0.04633 82 67 13 1
3196 This is not the 3 for 1 we anticipated. We’ve got to start reading Groupon’s fine print. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3197 It’s the latest method in roommate therapy. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3198 Think of it as a ride-sharing pool for people who don't quite know where they are going 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3199 Okay, so you all feel like nobody understands you... 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3200 What did you expect? It is a sale after all. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3201 We call it tri-cot therapy. It's for people who are close-knit. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3202 Is the price split,1/3? ...or, the advice given, proportioned, 1/3? How would Sanders' Medicare apportion the bill? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3203 Your mother, your father, God. You have to guess which applies to you. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3204 Before we get started I have some good news,your Insurance Policy has a "family rider",you're covered. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3205 As I said, you'll find my group rate very economical. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3206 If you're really tripolar, then two of you can leave. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3207 Once again, who thinks they are Wynken, Blynken, or Nod? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3208 Remember to answer in the form of a question. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3209 I am just not feeling myself. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3210 You all know that reimbursements for mental health care aren’t what they used to be. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3211 And you all live in Tribeca? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3212 Welcome to focus group therapy. Today we will discuss any mommy and cell phone provider issues. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3213 Your insurance company will pay for 15 minutes of free association each, followed by my analysis of you as individuals and as a group. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3214 No, you don't all have to start with your childhood. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3215 Ah, now I see why you inquired if I was an expert in treating ménage à trois. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3216 who passed the gas? 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3217 Charging per session usually means one person. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3218 It's a clear case of multiple personality disorder. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3219 So, how long have you felt you don’t get enough attention? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3220 For confidentiality purposes, I will use "superego" for you on top, "ego" for you in the middle, and "id" for you on the bottom. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3221 One white, one black, one blond. Fine, but The Mod Squad went off the air 47 years ago. Deal with it. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3222 I hope you each understand that I’m tripling my fee. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3223 Sure you live your lives one at a time, but your problems tend to fall into professional categories. It is efficient this way. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3224 I guess this is one way they'll let you be on top, Rachel. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3225 Tell me about your menage a trois 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3226 No, Joe, this is not the time to address your bed wetting. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3227 A multi-storied family saga sounds a bit corny, doesn't it? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3228 Thank you all for sharing. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3229 my group rate is a tad less expensive. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3230 We'll get to the bottom of this. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3231 Marge, why did your husband and son make you climb to the top couch? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3232 Multiple personalities, multiple fees. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3233 Clearly this is textbook single personality disorder. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3234 Triple decka analysis. I was trained in Boston. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3235 But by shielding Ethan from meteors, you're exposing him to the larger risk of bunk failure." 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3236 We’ll begin at the top; I’m a proponent of the trickle down theory. 1.1829 0.05522 82 71 7 4
3237 I didnt mean this kind of Thresome 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3238 Millenial threesome 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3239 No, the rate is still $250 an hour for each of you. 1.1829 0.05522 82 71 7 4
3240 I did mention on the phone that I was an expert in multiple personalities...I didn't think you were literally going to show up with all three of you! 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3241 What do you think they meant when they called you a ham, Brian? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3242 I''ve got this. I have a PhD in Manage à Trois. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3243 Imagine there was a ladder 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3244 I'm sorry, but the Groupon does not cover trauma from summer camp. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3245 Let’s spice things up. This time, repeat the mantra in 3-part harmony. 1.1829 0.05522 82 71 7 4
3246 Please blink if you have ever felt that nobody cares about your responses at all. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3247 Sleep therapy not fart therapy, Mr. Jones!. Please hold your clattering. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3248 Maybe I can squeeze you in at four. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3249 I’ll start at the top and work my way down, ok? 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3250 Hi-throughput Analysis 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3251 All of your insights are bunk. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3252 So, you think your Peter, Paul & Mary.? Now which one of you identifies as Mary.? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3253 I know it's hard, but tiers really help in therapy 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3254 No, Robert. This would not make a great podcast. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3255 I wonder, Peter or Paul, how do you feel when Mary says she’s in love with a big blue frog? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3256 Maybe free Medicare for all wasn’t a great idea. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3257 You must be honest with me. This is all bunk! 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3258 OK which one of you had the issue of not getting enough attention? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3259 It's important you understand that relationships are not hierarchical by nature. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3260 We have some issues here of tall order. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3261 I triple dog dare any one of you to blame your mother. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3262 Superego and Ego, what do you think of Id's behavior at the Strip Club? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3263 Welcome to group therapy with Medicare for all. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3264 Welcome to Psycho Jeopardy. Our categories are Sibling Rivalry, Holiday Disappointments and Petty Jealousy 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3265 Listen up, folks. One of the important aspects of group therapy is to help you to understand that you are not alone in the problems you face, so you don't feel so isolated. Can you feel it working? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3266 There must be something going around. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3267 Sharing a therapy session is the most cost-effective treatment option until there’s healthcare for all. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3268 Clearly, two of you *do* have something to live for. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3269 Which one of you was it again that secretly hates their siblings? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3270 looks like a bad pyramid scheme 1.1829 0.05789 82 72 5 5
3271 This isn’t the kind of three-way I had in mind... 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3272 I've never forgotten my first job was as a summer camp counselor. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3273 Yes, this is exactly what I meant when I said I specialize in multiple personality disorders. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3274 Will super ego raise your hand? 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3275 It's all your health plan allows. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3276 My practice is to bill all three of you for your multiple personality disorder treatment. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3277 And what brings you to Budget Therapy today? Patient A? 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3278 See, that's the real problem with socialized medicine! It's going to come at the expense of - and this includes mental health care- at the expense of that personalized and attentive care which you've grown accustomed to. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3279 Tell me about your Universal Medicare phobia. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3280 Cost effective psychotherapy in the 21st century. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3281 MacKenzie, thank you for sharing your truth. we appreciate how difficult that must have been. now, Aaron— Steve, Steve, shut the fuck up for a second and wait your turn... now, Aaron… are you gonna let this bitch talk to you like that? 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3282 What did you expect on the cruise ship! 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3283 Dad's pregnant? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3284 Sounds like throuple. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3285 Your couch assignment depends on how much you're to blame for your family's problems. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3286 Three is an odd number. Are you all queer? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3287 Well, the Landlord raised the rent again, so put on your thinking caps-we've gotta come up with another room-mate. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3288 Your insurance plan allows us to add two more levels, so we will add Granny and Grampy starting next week. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3289 This approach has increased our productivity 300% with only a minor uptick in our furniture costs. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3290 I don’t think we need to pay $250 an hour for her to tell us that two is company and three’s a crowd. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3291 Since you all have textbook Oedipus complexes, I figured we could save you some money and me some time. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3292 I'm trying to improve my productivity. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3293 Let's pretend you're the Tri-State area. Which one of you identifies as "New Jersey?" 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3294 And Joseph, would you say you’re stuck in the middle physically and emotionally? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3295 Efficient Psychotherapy 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3296 Welcome to Groupon therapy session. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3297 Can you demonstrate what do you mean when you say-the three of us are a dysfunctional family? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3298 Yeah, pretty good. Yourself? 1.1829 0.05522 82 71 7 4
3299 Times are tough. Thank goodness for bulk discount! 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3300 Anything you'd like to add to that, number three? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3301 Yes... you’ll each have a chance being on the top bunk. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3302 Social Medicine 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3303 I'm sorry for the unconventional setup, rest assured my secretary has been fired for the mixup. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3304 So how long have you been trip sharing in your Uber app? 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3305 Hmm, I wondered how this Groupon thing was gonna work. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3306 My revolutionary approach to trickle down psychology has its roots in economics." 1.1829 0.04947 82 68 11 2
3307 This Buy-Two,Get One Free is getting out of hand. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3308 I'm going to go with Multiple Personality Disorder. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3309 And if you lie, cheat, or steal, this is how your life will be in a cell somewhere. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3310 This therapy is underwritten by UBER shared. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3311 If you're going to sleep with other people, try doing it this way. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3312 Let's give this a shot. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3313 ... and since group therapy is at half cost, you should adjust your expectations accordingly! 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3314 Some of you may be wondering if Groupon was such a great idea considering the confidentiality issue... 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3315 Yes, your time getting up there is included in your 50 minutes. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3316 Welcome to therapy under the Bernie Sander’s plan. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3317 Mod Squad meets This is Us. The bunk therapy couches are just for show. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3318 So, you say your having issues being the middle child. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3319 Liam Liam, I’m sure that it can’t be easy being the middle sibling let alone finding out that you are adopted. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3320 I'm beginning to see why the vertical merger is causing some office tension. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3321 Welcome to our low cost therapy for all program. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3322 Today let's continue to explore your personality layers. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3323 And how long have you been haunted by white male privilege? 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3324 One of you has neurosis, one has psychosis, and one has halitosis. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3325 Tell me more about your first sleepover 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3326 Welcome to triage therapy 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3327 I prefer to sleep naked, if that's okay 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3328 The insurance company wants me to increase my productivity ! 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3329 Now tell me about your mothers one at a time. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3330 Sounds like each of you have different levels of commitment issues. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3331 Bedwetting?! 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3332 Imagine you're in a chair facing me. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3333 I've got a hair appointment at one, so let's make this quick: Think of me as your mother; Don't think of me as your mother; Remember you are making progress; Now leave. By the way, this is your last session. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3334 Nothing you say will leave this room. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3335 Since you all feel you are not being heard as individuals, I wanted to try this radical new therapy technique. 1.1829 0.05243 82 69 9 3
3336 I'm sensing multiple personalities. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3337 Tom, we're going to address your feeling that everyone else is above you. 1.1829 0.04947 82 68 11 2
3338 Been waiting 3 and a half years to use this three-decker Long-Chair. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3339 SPECIALIZING IN FAMILY THERAPY 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3340 Lets talk about your fears of the club sandwich 1.1829 0.04947 82 71 8 3
3341 Let's start off with why you believe you have multiple personalities? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3342 Okay, now we'll explore the camp-counselor-as-mother metaphor. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3343 Your outlook on life can be just bunk. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3344 Patient number three, describe your dream disorder. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3345 When I said, you need stay on top of him......... 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3346 Now Tracy, have you considered whether you’re interfering with bro time?” 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3347 And so I decided to give therapy a tri. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3348 Janet, you are saving money with the group session and curing your fear of heights. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3349 I've been told my therapy treatment can never be debunked. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3350 So, clients number two and three, tell me how it makes you feel when client number one wets herself. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3351 Please wait your turn, Id. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3352 Welcome to this inaugural group therapy session for antisocial patients. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3353 What were you expecting when I mentioned happy hour special. 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3354 Watch out for that glass ceiling. 1.1807 0.04892 83 70 11 2
3355 No, you cannot split the co-pay 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3356 On the bright side, your condition qualifies for our TheraPool rate. 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3357 To answer your question, this therapy teaches you that no one is special, so it doesn’t really matter who goes first. 1.1807 0.05184 83 71 9 3
3358 I at a time, please! 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3359 Since you're on the group discount, you've each got just over 18 minutes. 1.1807 0.04249 83 68 15 0
3360 Patsy, now that you have the top bunk, how does it make you feel? 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3361 Id, Superego, Ego: What's on your mind? 1.1807 0.05184 83 71 9 3
3362 I see that you found the group discount on GroupOn" 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3363 The subject has rapidly exceeded expectations 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3364 Would you all debunk group therapy then? 1.1786 0.05126 84 72 9 3
3365 Doesn't look like I'll make lunch with this stack of problems. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3366 I just always feel like they’re on top of me for everything that I do, Everything. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3367 I need to improve my productivity... 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3368 "The whole setup's a bit daft--who has the purring kitten?" 1.1786 0.05399 84 73 7 4
3369 The upside: I can hear the problems of three people at once. The downside: I don't know who's who. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3370 I said lie where you want, not when you want. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3371 Umh...looks like we have a multiple personality disorder. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3372 Seems to me, you suffer from multiple personalities. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3373 As we discussed,you really need to work on your separation issues. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3374 Your plan only covers group therapy. And there is a $50 copay -each. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3375 Make sure to present your Groupon certificate at checkout. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3376 So. You ALL three were English lit majors at Bryn Mawr? 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3377 I forgot to install a ladder, so I think we'll have to approach the issue bottom-up. 1.1786 0.04838 84 70 11 2
3378 What do you expect ? You used a groupon ! 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3379 I believe you have a particularly acute form of multiple personality disorder. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3380 No, my slip and fall policy does not cover you for falling out of bed. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3381 Before we begin, you should know that your HMO requires the full copay per individual. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3382 Please keep your responses in the form of a question ! 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3383 So, Why do you feel so trapped, like your parents have been hovering over you every moment of your life? 1.1786 0.05126 84 72 9 3
3384 Because you're all on the same HMO... 1.1786 0.04204 84 69 15 0
3385 Sleep study subjects are now requested to turn to the fetal position. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3386 Well, what did you expect when you redeemed your buy-one-get-three psychotherapy coupons? 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3387 Let's give "trickle-down psychology" a try, shall we? 1.1786 0.04204 84 69 15 0
3388 Three at a time? It's cheaper that way. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3389 So it's the same amount of time, but each of you pay the same. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3390 Look at it this way, you're getting my services at 1/3 the fee and the mutual commiseration comes free! 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3391 I’d like to welcome you all to Sumer Camp Therapy 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3392 Let's build on this next week. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3393 'So, what was it about summer camp that made you sad?' 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3394 since the wait times for mental health services at this university are so goddamn long, we thought this would be a good compromise so you’d all stop bitching to us about how you’re too sad to wait three weeks 1.1786 0.04838 84 70 11 2
3395 No one can debunk my version of family therapy. 1.1750 0.05270 80 69 8 3
3396 this‘ll all change once bernie becomes president 1.1750 0.04960 80 68 10 2
3397 Like it or not, this session will dwell on issues of race, gender, and inequality. 1.1750 0.04960 80 68 10 2
3398 Just to be clear...your HMO does not pay for group sessions. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
3399 Thank you for agreeing to participate in Sally's summer camp of '72 re-enactment. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
3400 A little louder this time: Three cheers for me!" 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
3401 Vertical group therapy. 1.1688 0.05359 77 67 7 3
3402 How does this medicare for all make you feel? 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
3403 No, this session is not going to be called tiers for fears. 1.1688 0.04297 77 64 13 0
3404 OK, now for the next round of answers the top one will be Id, the middle one Ego, and the bottom one Super Ego. Got it ? 1.1688 0.05359 77 67 7 3
3405 Top patient, I notice your legs are crossed. That means you have avoidance issues. 1.1688 0.04297 77 64 13 0
3406 To establish your social identity, tell me which of the following groups you would most wish to join: bears, musketeers or little pigs. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
3407 Family therapy works better without eye contact. 1.1688 0.05359 77 67 7 3
3408 Group discounts expire next month. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
3409 Getting you out of one bed is the first step in menage therapy. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
3410 Next week, I want the top bunk. 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
3411 Tell me about your fathers ... 1.1688 0.05359 77 67 7 3
3412 Timmy, how do you feel about your mom calling top bunk? 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
3413 Medicare For All has some hidden drawbacks from your point of view. Frankly I get paid if you take a nap. 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
3414 Accomodate. You are not oppressed by imperatives for inclusiveness gender neutrality 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
3415 So...tell me more about this traumatic experience at summer camp. 1.1688 0.04297 77 64 13 0
3416 Blue Cross does cover gender change for triplets. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
3417 Don’t worry, I have done this before hundreds of times, just not with an odd number of people. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
3418 You feel you might have multiple personalities... tell me about that. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
3419 I told you it was PC Therapy 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
3420 You three are taking group therapy to a whole new level! 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
3421 If this triple session is going to work, then one of you start talking NOW! 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
3422 Greg, Peter, Bobby, dating your TV mother in Hollywood is more common than you think. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
3423 Yes, this is the only way the insurance would cover your therapy. 1.1688 0.05359 77 67 7 3
3424 Guys, no more past life regression therapy - I can barely keep track of your PRESENT lives at once 1.1688 0.04297 77 64 13 0
3425 See, it doesn't matter if two thirds of the house votes YES. 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
3426 Mouse No. 007 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3427 Yeah, it really was a rocket science 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3428 I think you may be too accommodating of your parents. Let's start there. 1.1667 0.04247 78 65 13 0
3429 You seem to share the same POSITION on every thing. 1.1667 0.05294 78 68 7 3
3430 So, when did your parents first say, bad things come in threes? 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3431 One of our goals in therapy will be to keep things from piling up on you. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3432 How did the one-size-fits-all approach become inescapable? 1.1667 0.05595 72 63 6 3
3433 When did you realize your mother paid more attention to your siblings? 1.1667 0.05294 78 68 7 3
3434 This form of group therapy is the only way to treat your psychosomatic incontinence. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3435 Your 23.me group therapy rate ends this week 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3436 Ok people, it sounds like you’re starting to conflate the facts of your awful childhoods with the limitations of your tiered medical benefits. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3437 Let’s begin by imagining yourselves on a 3D Scrabble Board.... what is your word? Maybe it’s a very small word like “me” or a mega word like”confused” or MAYBE some of your tiles are blanks................... 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3438 So how did you feel about the affair? 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3439 I wonder if we will continue to have a Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate now that men can get pregnant. 1.1667 0.05600 78 69 5 4
3440 I'm just gonna be honest here, I don't really like kids. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3441 TheraPool 1.1667 0.05294 78 68 7 3
3442 College therapist visits be like. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3443 I specialize on people your size. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3444 Bunk order matters. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3445 Well, the co-pay is still 50 per person. 1.1667 0.04623 78 65 11 1
3446 Now, if you can, think of your childhood. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3447 The middle child is usually the most dysfunctional. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3448 Judy, Bill, Dave... Since all three of you are in denial, I was wondering if you wouldn't mind one three-for session today? 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3449 Threesome personalities 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3450 The group rate for Reconciliations requires total consensus on all issues. Everybody on board with that? 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3451 These medicare for all shrinks are not working out 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3452 But doctor, this IS us! 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3453 I do this to help those without medical insurance... 1.1667 0.04247 78 65 13 0
3454 Welcome to summer camp therapy 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3455 These Groupon deals are getting out of control 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3456 How would your inner child feel about this? 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3457 Well, in my clinical opinion, the three of you sharing a 400 square foot apartment in Park Slope is just flat-out nuts! 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3458 Damn cut-rate insurance. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3459 The ladder is extra... 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3460 Remember, your group rate doesn't entitle you to a seperate diagnosis. 1.1667 0.04247 78 65 13 0
3461 Sweden 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3462 Oh come on How could your mon get this guy pregnant 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3463 What I meant to say is how WELL do you guys sleep at night? 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3464 Welcome to Medicare Advantage plan therapy! 1.1667 0.04247 78 65 13 0
3465 You each get to say a third of a sentence. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3466 You know, This is Us, is a TV show not reality 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
3467 So as I understand it, one of you has an inferiority complex, another has a superiority complex, and the other neither. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3468 I can see you’re struggling to find your independence. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3469 I know this is the latest in psychological fads, and I know all of you are more comfortable, but I still think group therapy should include being able to see each other, so we can interact more. 1.1667 0.05600 78 69 5 4
3470 Mr. Jones, please refrain from hitting the back of Ms. Potter's chair when it is reclined. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3471 Bachelor No.2... 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3472 Move over...I can’t see theTV! 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3473 . . . and agoraphobia in the middle. We good now? 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3474 I can see this a few ways. 1.1667 0.04247 78 65 13 0
3475 From the top, tell me about your fear of heights, claustrophobia, and separation anxiety. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3476 Think of it as group therapy with a twist. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
3477 ... which is why I started this post-summer camp support group." 1.1667 0.04247 78 65 13 0
3478 Welcome to Costco Psychiatric Services 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
3479 My apologies. But with the climate crisis, student debt and METOO, I am stacked up!!!! 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
3480 ...But why the Nike sneakers? 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
3481 You will be billed for one hour in three parts. So you each get 18 minutes. 1.1628 0.04332 86 73 12 1
3482 This only happens with the Gruyere 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3483 Wait I can’t remember... is this maze for us or for her? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3484 Get here early next time and you can have the bottom couch. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3485 Does this trigger your fear of heights? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3486 Breathe. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3487 Welcome to the “Bern Unit”! 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3488 In layperson terms you have a REALLY advanced case of multiple personality disorder. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3489 Good question, Steven— how do YOU think couches were assigned? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3490 Three-way sex is problematic for everyone. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3491 Bachelor Number One, Would you say you're more depressed or more anxious? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3492 To begin with, think of the money you're saving. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3493 Would you like separate checks? 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3494 I specialize in split personalities. 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3495 Why the long faces, the coupon said three sessions for the price of one? 1.1622 0.05781 74 66 4 4
3496 OK! So, you're not the "Mod Squad." 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3497 apologies! I can't pay my San Francisco office rental any other way! 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3498 The menage a trois doesn't usually work out well. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3499 Thank you for choosing to bundle your individual therapies. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3500 With Multiple Personality Disorders, my fees are tripled! 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3501 This is Us? How did Randall end up the fat one? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3502 The Groupon DID say ‘3 sessions for the price of 1. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3503 Sorry. Your groupon expired yesterday. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3504 Please understand, it’s an election year. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3505 No one leaves 'til we smoke out the whistle-blower 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3506 What do expect when you use Groupon? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3507 Yes, I specialize in menage a trois 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3508 OK. Who wants to be Id for the next hour? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3509 I think this is a case of your feminine side pulling rank 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3510 I guess no one told you how corporate psychology worked, huh? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3511 How would you like to split the co-pay? I don’t do separate checks. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3512 I think we need to debunk some myths about family relationships. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3513 This is running so well I have considered starting a deal "four for the price of one" . 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3514 Remember that Ego was supposed to be in the middle. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3515 The group rate only applies to birth order issues. 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3516 I don't think Ancestry's DNA testing will do any more eye-opening than a glance in the mirror will. And that's my professional opinion! 1.1622 0.05451 74 64 6 3
3517 Affordable care act 3.0 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3518 Since you all share major sexual inadequacy problems, I thought I could save myself a lot of phony caring and make three times the bucks as you listen to each other's screwed up lives. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3519 There's no 'I' in team but there's no 'we' in Team either! 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3520 Just a reminder, keep it real, the sale ends next week 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3521 Good morning. I'd like to welcome you all to polytherapy. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3522 Before we start, I want to make sure everyone's clear that my rate is different for thrupples' therapy. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3523 Who feels the odds are stacked against them? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3524 This layering of personalities is the convoluted, and continuing personal narrative or intimate memory that shapes behavior, informs one's identity, and welcomes human beings into today's reality. BTW, how did you choose who would be on top? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3525 They’ll sit up once they find out the winner chose a different position. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3526 Since you all have the same problems, this should go more quickly for me, and more cheaply for you. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3527 This fantasy of being parked and left by your parents...when did it start? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3528 Doc, could I be suffering from “Middle Child”syndrome? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3529 Let's begin. First I'll explain how three-tier pricing works in this practice. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3530 Okay - Which of our personalities is most needy today? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3531 We can get to the bottom of your problem, but several levels will remain 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3532 I'm so pleased that our college counseling center has finally found a solution to the problem of so many students requesting visits! Joe, your twenty minutes are first--go! 1.1622 0.04314 74 64 9 1
3533 I see that your problems are really stacking up. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3534 You could experiment with dances other than the Tango 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3535 Welcome to Carvana Therapy. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3536 No one said ethical non-monogamy would be easy 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3537 So, who didn't want the threesome? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3538 Let's see who can be the first to ring in on this subject: performance anxiety. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3539 Hmm, so you all have the same personality? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3540 So what do you all think of this trial of Medicaid? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3541 Yes, this is it when you pay for my services with Costco discount cards. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3542 Shoot! I guess we never really got to you in the middle there. Sorry about that - next time, OK? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3543 Mark, how do your roommates' fears of heights and collapsing bunk beds make you feel? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3544 Once again to comply with HIPPA privacy laws I need to confirm that you three are complete strangers. Correct? 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3545 Therapy Ride Share 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3546 So, which one of you is Steve? 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3547 I think I am regretting the Therapy Pool service 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3548 When I count to three, you will awaken and will have figured out how you will get down. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3549 So which one of you losers wants to sleep with their mother? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3550 Please each answer one word in sequence if you still want your discount 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3551 Psychotherapy is bunk. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3552 Freud never had thruples therapy 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3553 What I have is that everyone of you have a tummy ache. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3554 Let's go to group therapy they said, it'll be fun they said. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3555 I understand. Two thirds of my patients tell me that they’ve thought about jumping. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3556 I hope you enjoyed it. Will that be one check? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3557 Share why you feel resentment toward Medicare For All. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3558 During these group therapy sessions, we will focus on interpersonal relationships. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3559 I think my problem is I don't feel unique and special 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3560 OK, who'd like to start today's intrapsychic dialogue: Id, Ego, or Superego? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3561 I think, perhaps, you understood what I said about individuating a bit too literally. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3562 So why is it you feel she's above you all the time? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3563 At the count of three the couch will collapse downward at which time we will open our discussion on trauma. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3564 On your marks... get set... unburden! 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3565 Now to begin...you each will have 20 minutes...in descending order. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3566 Yes, "group" is a possibility. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3567 So tell me, how long have the three of you experienced single-personality disorder? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3568 Welcome to group therapy. First rule: Freudism is bunk... 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3569 Why don't you feel like you're getting enough one-on-one time? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3570 Whoa! Before I deal with your split personality, please help me sort out your dueling pronouns." 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3571 I’m sorry, Nate. But treatment for feelings of low self-worth are complementary only for first-class patients. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3572 Next year, guys, try to opt for a plan with deductibles and co-pays! 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3573 This share economy has reached a new level. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3574 While effective, triage therapy has been slow to catch on. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3575 So Karen, Franklin and Chad... How does ‘Therapy Pool’ make you feel? 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3576 Let's begin with assigning id, ego, and super-ego. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3577 And no, this does not mean your session is extended. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3578 Did the threesome start spontaneously, or was it something one or more of you had been secretly planning 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3579 History is not a bunk bed. 1.1622 0.04314 74 63 9 1
3580 Will you be paying by separate checks or all together? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3581 Which of your three personalities are most prominent for this session? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3582 Because your insurance company cut our reimbursement rate by two-thirds, that's why. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3583 Welcome to our youth hostel group session. As is traditional in Europe top bunk goes first. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3584 So you're feeling disconnected? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3585 I'm going for the trifecta 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3586 This is what happens when you buy your therapy session in bulk from a discount warehouse store. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3587 Let’s get this straight; only one of you can be Spartacus. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3588 This whole Groupon thing just isn't working for us. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3589 I’m telling you, Natalie, Dave & Spencer, you are not suffering from multiple personality disorder. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3590 Menage a trois therapy requires total honesty from at least two out of three. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3591 I have to say, what I'm hearing is a lot of bunk. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3592 Now, in this hour we delve into your perspectives about pecking order. Who do you feel should speak first? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3593 Alice is running late. When she gets here, let's all gather in the big bed. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3594 The patients above you are deaf-mute. They are part of the control group in therapy effectiveness studies. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3595 Have the three of you met each other yet? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3596 Our next exercise will be less physical. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3597 As you can tell, I'm triple-booked. Not to worry, I plan to bill you all the full hour. 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3598 And I thought Spock's chess set was hard.... 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3599 I want to warn you, that all my questions will be multiple choices. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3600 It seems that you have a superiority complex. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3601 Let's address the layers. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3602 Look at it this way. You are only paying a third of the cost. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3603 So this is what they mean by "Medicare for All?" 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3604 Is this your first time in throuples therapy? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3605 I know it's not ideal, but it's the only way your insurance will cover it. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3606 And how long have you had this feeling of being ripped off? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3607 So, whose ideas was throuple's counseling? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3608 So which one of you is the id, the ego and the superego? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3609 Who said that?” 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3610 Let's start at the bottom. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3611 Please clarify. Who's id, ego and superego? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3612 To be honest,I've never used crowdfunding before. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3613 So, I hear you saying you still don't feel very special 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3614 So, who's Moe, who's Larry, who's Curly? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3615 Welcome to the Therapy Game. Patient Number 2. What is your earliest memory of you mother? 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3616 Jackie, you're afraid of heights, let's start with you. 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3617 How long have you had these multiple personalities? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3618 So, how do you want to split the bill? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3619 Top Bunk, I’m not getting the teenage angst like Bottom Bunk. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3620 So, how do like the multi-tiered health plan so far? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3621 Welcome to the Triple-Decker clinic. Let’s begin by sharing the most shameful act of your life. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3622 Okay, welcome to throuples’ therapy. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3623 ''Well I'm sorry, but when we downsized we weren't anticipating the return of the millennials.' 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3624 So, tell me again about being the middle child. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3625 The upside is it only 1/3 the cost 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3626 This has got to be the worst case of multiple personality disorder that I have ever treated. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3627 Here's the issue as I see it: You're all nerd-ass losers who make six-figure salaries and work 70-hour weeks at powerful technology corporations, and yet you think for some reason that makes you unconventional enough to be poly. Well, I'm not so sure 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3628 Who is next? 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3629 patient two, why aren't you holding hands with yourself? 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3630 For the last time, and I can't stress this enough, I don't offer group rates. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3631 Take a deep breath, and really try to channel your higher self. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3632 To answer your question #2, it was the only way we could get Medicare for All to work using Warren's numbers. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3633 And how does that make your generation feel? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3634 For the last time, Neil, you get your turn on top NEXT week. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3635 OK, office trauma. Let's take it from the top. 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3636 The Uber Pool of therapy... What was I thinking!? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3637 You asked for the family discount. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3638 Why do you think you're co-dependent? 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3639 Let's work on your fears of heights, impending doom, and mediocrity. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3640 My patients in Group find this new arrangement more incentivizing. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3641 I have brought group therapy to new levels of understanding 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3642 I'd like the bottom couch to continue discussing your anxieties around social hierarchies. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3643 So, you claim trinity. 1.1622 0.05781 74 66 4 4
3644 So, in this ménage, is the woman always on top? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3645 Menage a trois mania? Are you sure it isn't depression? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3646 1: And remember, Carl gets the top bunk next week. 2: Will you be paying together or separately? 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3647 It's more efficient to treat all my agoraphobics at once 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3648 Patient number three, which bunk do you think you'll find yourself on in ten years, and why? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3649 It's my new system: all the benefits of individual therapy, and a bit of the group process as well! 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3650 I divide the hour evenly into thirds. Once you get to the bottom bed it's your turn. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3651 I see you all have TRI-CARE insurance 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3652 Before we begin, your insurer doesn't cover multiple personality disorder, but I do offer a group discount. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3653 Let's start with your superego and work down from there. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3654 I am so sorry, but this was the only way I could squeeze you three in..... 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3655 How would you describe the importance of your youth hostel experiences? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3656 Welcome to my session devoted to the different degrees of acrophobia..... 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3657 Tell me, what were your expectations for a Groupon therapy session? 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3658 It's not that new - just a variation on group therapy. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3659 It’s summer camp sign-up season, so let’s begin. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3660 So this is the sector enjoying the "economic boom". 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3661 So to make this relationship work.. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3662 We're waiting for tech support to get you down. In the meantime, how do you feel about that? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3663 That's correct. 9 minutes each, individually, and 27 as a group. Whose plan am I billing for the dismount minute ? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3664 My therapist suggested that I eliminate redundancy in my life. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3665 No, not BOGO, the special is B2GO 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3666 Of course you are depressed. A medal in the three-man bobsled was your admittedly poorly-researched dream. 1.1622 0.05101 74 63 7 2
3667 Stop complaining! All three of you asked if I could make your sessions more affordable." 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3668 Nothing triples a practice like stacking appointments. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3669 Save that thought, Bob. Your fifteen minutes are up. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3670 Let's start at the top with the 'superego' and we'll work our way down from there. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3671 Welcome to camp Psyche 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3672 You're each lucky that there is a counselor on this submarine 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3673 Yes, this time it does appear that bad luck came in threes. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3674 Welcome to the three levels of psychoanalyst. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3675 OK number 2, same question. Did you hate your mother? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3676 Don't worry, it's normal for the middle child to feel excluded. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3677 Think of this as group insight. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3678 Now, this arrangement saves you money, but you'll have to listen carefully, and no speaking out of turn. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3679 Now, let's take this from the top. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3680 When did you all first start feeling suspicious of groupons? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3681 Welcome to my Three Patients At Once Discount Therapy. Also, keep in mind that I'm no carpenter, so I'll ask that you don't move much. The couches will collapse and you'll probably die as you all obviously have awful health insurance. 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3682 To be clear, your therapeutic hour will still be just 50 minutes. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3683 No, it's not like vertical farming, it's containing medical costs and improving efficiency. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3684 Please relax and be candid. I specialize in menages a trois. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3685 How does that make you feel - and please answer in 3 part harmony. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3686 And that leaves you, Margaret, to play the superego. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3687 Gives middle-aged a whole new meaning. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3688 For an extra fee I can upgrade you out of economy. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3689 You know...if you’re this busy Carol you could just raise your rates. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3690 I've found that drawing straws is the best way to resolve the "top bunk" issue, when triplets are involved. 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3691 So as middle children, who feels they still lack a sense of individuality? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3692 So there is a power play in this relationship? 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3693 Interesting. Your choice in bunk position says a lot about you. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3694 Can you give me an example of how you feel your sense of individuality was cultivated to be efficiently monetized. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3695 So. Why do you think you started having this strange 'threesome' fantasy ? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3696 First I would like to thank you for participation in our new Economy Analysis Program. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3697 Seth, you want to share your thoughts? THEN maybe I’ll get the ladder. 1.1622 0.05101 74 61 8 2
3698 So you're using Groupon's 3 for 1 deal today? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3699 The group rate means only one of you can tell me about your dreams. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3700 I usually help split personalities-this is something new. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3701 Trust me, we are debunking myths about therapy. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3702 Do you feel like you are still trapped on the quarantine ship? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3703 Sorry, but before we go any further, can someone explain what a ‘cuck’ is, just once more? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3704 When did you first feel you weren’t the center of attention? 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3705 I just assumed you said 'funk' 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3706 How does it make both of you feel that Martha is always on top? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
3707 It seems your problems are all related to being bullied at Summer camp 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3708 Sue, are you feeling as low as Tim. 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
3709 Patient number three, describe your dream repressed feeling. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3710 It's time to consider a conscious untripling. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3711 I apologize for overbooking this appointment. But Carol, this would be a great time to work on your fear of heights. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3712 Exactly how did you discover you had a multiple personality disorder...? 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
3713 I'm sorry but my reduced hourly rate only applies to seeing 3 patients at a time 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
3714 Thank you for holding. How may I assist you? 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3715 Welcome to Costco's Bulk Therapy. First I need to see your id, unless we need to talk about that first... 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3716 You say you're struggling with codependency? 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3717 So, what I'm hearing from you is that most of your anxieties stem from their childhoods. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3718 Shall we talk about this surrogate issue between you? 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3719 You all have what is known as Mod Squad syndrome. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3720 And just why do you feel your family is stacked against you? 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3721 Freud said the ''top bunk' is just a mental construct. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3722 So when did your group text start to feel unfulfilling? 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3723 So how is the family plan working for you? 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3724 Kayla has shown courage in sharing her fear of heights. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3725 Let’s begin by me explaining how family analysis works. 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3726 I am so Happy you all could participate in our Inagural Trifecta Class Bed Wetting psychotherapy Group !!! 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3727 So, how does it make you feel when women reach the highest level of achievement? 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3728 My hourly rate is still $200... 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3729 There are more benefits to this Groupon then just saving money if we decided to open up. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3730 Feel the Bern ! 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3731 Life stories-please and no bunk! 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3732 As gradual transition to group therapy is always best. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3733 Now that the fight over who gets the top bunk is done, let's get started. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3734 Let's talk about why you don't feel like individuals. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3735 Here at the airlines we're always trying to cram more people on our flights. Like making our private cabins into hostols. 1.1600 0.05383 75 66 6 3
3736 Worry about the election has force me to stack patients. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3737 Ever since I was on Oprah I’ve been swamped. This is the only solution. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3738 So you’ve been feeling like you aren’t special? 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3739 I apologize in advance, but you are the ones who chose the cheapest policy from a three-tier insurance plan. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3740 Why don’t you feel like an individual anymore? 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3741 OK, just so you know, there's no 3 for 1 discount. 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3742 Ok, and now Patient number 2, what is your idea of a perfect first date? 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3743 Our first session involves me straightening out this love triangle... 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3744 I think we're really making progress. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3745 So, tell me more about feeling unacknowledged. 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3746 Stop winking and blinking, and just nod please. 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3747 No, this is not a ménages à trois. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3748 Think back. When did your bunk bed envy begin? 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3749 How does that make ya’ll feel? 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3750 Your bill will be issued in triplicate. 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3751 This is affordable psychotherapy. We have grouped you together because you all have similar issues to work on. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3752 So I hear you three have bunk bed anxiety... 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3753 Let's start by talking about your other sibling. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 1
3754 Next Christmas, I'm choosing how we spend Mom's groupon. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3755 Here at Bunk Bed Therapy, we partner with healthcare companies to provide affordable therapeutic solutions. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3756 ... so why all the tiers ? 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3757 Is this your first time seeing a camp counselor? 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3758 No, birth order is not the source of your problems. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3759 I offer highly individualized treatment at low-cost group rates. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3760 We will now analyze your vertical expressions of your horizontal desires. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3761 You met in an UberPool ride? 1.1600 0.05383 75 66 6 3
3762 The bulk pricing model is perfect for the budget conscious patient. 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3763 You seem to be suffering from multiple personality disorder. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3764 Many of my new clients are coming for the same reason so this just made sense. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3765 I didn’t know that “Medicare for All” meant “Medicare for All at Once.” 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3766 Bachelor #2, what is your relationship with your mother? 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3767 Don't blame me. Blame your HMO. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3768 Wow! Today I see the complete "YOU" - Id, Ego and Superego! 1.1600 0.05383 75 66 6 3
3769 Joe, for next week's session, please trade places with Marie, you obviously need the most help with your fear of heights. 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
3770 I need the therapy after seeing three insecure people at a time 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
3771 I find that side-by-side couches result in too much cross talk. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
3772 It's the latest treatment for Multiple Personality Disorder 1.1591 0.04241 88 75 12 1
3773 And why do you think you can't see face-to-face? 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3774 When did you all stop seeing eye to eye? 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3775 Welcome to the three-stage approach to overcome your fear of heights! 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3776 So, it seems to me, what started as three kids in a trenchcoat has turned into something of a class system." 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3777 Now, which one of you was skeptical about throuples counseling? 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3778 I think you'll find my vertigo treatment sessions gradual and relaxing. 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3779 Hello kind sirs and ma'am. I am former British Prime Minister Tony Blair and I need your help. Last night, a witch placed me into the body of your therapist. I will charge you $1000 each if you do not take me to a church so I may be rid of this hex. 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
3780 Works wonders for my billable hours. 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
3781 And, what exactly makes you think you have multiple personality disorder? 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3782 I'm sorry! This is not what I meant about discount based on referring new patients 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3783 I’m afraid that you have a case of diverse personality disorder 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3784 I guess you could split the co-pay. 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3785 Okay, this is going to be trickier than I expected. Which one of you is the pregnant one? 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
3786 Okay , now let's try the Rashomon Method: Each of you tell me what you saw. 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3787 I see we are out of time --- much earlier than usual, too. 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3788 The problem likely stems from your parents hovering over you 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3789 We are exploring how your position in society affects your sense of self 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3790 Let's discuss why it's important to read the Groupon fine print. 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3791 Look, no one ever said that polyamorous partners counseling would be easy. 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
3792 ..and now patient no.2, how would YOU describe YOUR vertigo? 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3793 Have you always felt disappointed by group health? 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
3794 Owing to the success of group therapy, we have started experimenting with group analysis. 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
3795 Now Larry, unpack your meaning when you say, "This is a lotta bunk." 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3796 Dreams come to us in many layers 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3797 It's new ,works on trains,submarines and anywhere there is a bunk bed. Also you get the group rate. 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3798 I find this style of group therapy is more space efficient. 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3799 I triple booked myself so I’ll give you each a discounted rate 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3800 My trademarked method takes group therapy to a whole new level. 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
3801 We're not going to get anywhere until you realize that your rationalizations are a lot of bunk. 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3802 Yes, these group therapy sessions are more economical, but you do have to wait for your turn. 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3803 Well, you must have seen the stories about Manhattan therapists tripling up so they can pay their rent. 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
3804 What makes you think you have separation anxiety” 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3805 Welcome to our new Gen X-Y-Z Trifective! 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
3806 I find this type of therapy works well when you are all the same kind of crazy 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
3807 So you feel like there is a hierarchy in your family? 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
3808 Number 3, if you could be any animal you liked, what would it be? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
3809 5 minutes in and he’s already in better control of the missile than Trump. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3810 Is it just me, or does it look a bit bored today? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3811 Have you always had multiple personalities? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3812 We've got to overcome this feeling that none of you stacks up. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3813 We now offer these sessions after your presidential candidate withdraws from the race. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3814 So...we are splitting the session cost, right? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3815 We'll begin the round-robin part of the session, but first I need your co-pays. 1.1528 0.05474 72 64 5 3
3816 Group therapy can be very effective for insomnia 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3817 I'm picking up on multiple multiple personality disorders. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3818 Okay, which on is the id? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3819 Welcome to my "One third the normal fee therapy session" . 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3820 What did you expect? You’re here on a Groupon 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3821 Your fear of childhood sleeping arrangements dictating your place in society has been debunked. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3822 Going into fantasy suite week, I’d like to reiterate how important it is for y’all to be real with me. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3823 For multiple personalities I can give you a group rate. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3824 Ok Carol, I suppose that makes me Alice in all this? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3825 So, tell me about your 'bunky' moods. When did you start feeling this way? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3826 And, lastly, please keep in mind, you're not being graded on originality. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3827 I like to do things alphabetically, so we'll start with acrophobia. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3828 The good news is that you are not a split personality. The bad news is that all three of you owe my full fee for this session. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3829 ...and which one of you was adopted? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3830 Hmmm....Larry, Curly, and Moe you say? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3831 How does it make you feel to be Mr. In-between? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3832 Let's start from the top. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3833 Who referred you?” Groupon. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3834 We try to be constructive in here, but that does sound like a load of bunk. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3835 It may look like a simple design, but it's actually part of a complex. 1.1528 0.05821 72 65 3 4
3836 Your groupon for therapy may retraumatize your birth order issues. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3837 I will need that 3 for 1 coupon before this session is over. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3838 Debunking the psyche 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3839 So how is The Triple Threat doing today 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3840 Alright, let's start from the top. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3841 Thank you for attending my three for one therapy happy hour. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3842 Okay, now rotate! 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3843 So why do you think the dishwasher is always full? 1.1528 0.05474 72 64 5 3
3844 We’re replacing group therapy with tier therapy” 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3845 The bad news is that you may feel some anxiety with this arrangement. The good news is that your HMOs approved a three-for-one discount. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3846 I hope that my new discount therapy will be as profitable for you as it is for me. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3847 I’ve had to change my office layout since I signed with Groupon. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3848 Next week we will switch it up since none of you has a fear of heights. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3849 Stack ‘em and crack ‘em. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3850 OK your 20 minutes are up, next couch 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3851 I'm so glad to see more Groupon patients. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3852 First, let me thank you for participating in our seismic safety study. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3853 Any questions concerning recent changes in your Obamacare policies? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3854 Psychiatric Overload!!! 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3855 Now, about your claustrophobia... 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3856 Welcome to the trial of TherapyPool. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3857 OK, I think we're starting to get at the roots of the personality split, but we have to end. A bigger issue's getting you to agree on a time for your next session. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3858 When you mentioned you had split personality,I was envisioning something different. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3859 You think you've got problems? You should hear the guy who sucks at musical beds. 1.1528 0.04706 72 64 6 2
3860 I've found this therapy quite effective, though my colleagues think it's bunk. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3861 Great progress-you were able to separate some of your inner selves. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3862 Now, Amy, let's return to your fear of heights. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3863 Your stories are remarkably similar 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3864 I thought we'd begin today's session by apologizing from the ground up. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3865 Three more sessions, and your triskaphobia will be cured. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3866 The rules are 18 minutes each. No interruptions! 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3867 Welcome to the new sharing economy: ShrinkPool. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3868 “ Let’s begin where we left off last session about why mom always gets the top couch.” 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3869 You took the private insurance option but then pressed the "share" button 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3870 It's OK...the issue you are working through has many layers. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3871 So who ordered UberPool Therapy first? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3872 So much for individual therapy 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3873 I thought the 3-for-1 coupon meant three sessions for the price of one not 3 patients in 1 session. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3874 I see that you've brought in your id and your superego. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3875 Why do you feel that other people's problems are stacking up on you? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3876 And when you say you need space...? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3877 That's a lot of bunk! 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3878 You can talk to Sonia on the way out to review the co-co-co-pay policy. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3879 Well, what did you expect with a GroupOn? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3880 The new group therapy. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3881 Remind me, which of you has issues of being a middle child? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3882 I’m sure that you’re aware that threesomes are a common fantasy, however, in reality, these relationships can have unexpected emotional consequences. I would suggest that next week, we set up individual sessions, in spite of your unanimous objection. 1.1528 0.05474 72 64 5 3
3883 Dr Schimmelpfennig wasn't going to let her Freudian fundamentalism stop her working with families. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3884 So which one is the id? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3885 So Jeremy is feeling anxious about his apparent gender status as his pregnancy is showing. John? Emily? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3886 A triple-decker bunk bed is that what mental health has come to. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3887 Self esteem comes from knowing you're special, that people will focus on you as an individual; OK, let's start in the middle. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3888 Your my second customer with bed related issues, the 5 little monkeys were my first. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3889 dang, triple personality disorder a billing nightmare.... 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3890 Wait a second...which one of you was here for acrophobia? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3891 How do we feel about that? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3892 Is there room for one more? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3893 You suffer from anxiety. Next three! 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3894 Sorry, I didn't quite hear that. Which of your multiple personalities is speaking now? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3895 Business has been booming since I offered a discount on Groupon, so I've had to group my patients together by diagnosis. You three were a perfect match. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3896 Again, I'm sorry for the inconvenience. This was how we could keep insurance costs down. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3897 Now to save time, just raise your right hand if your mother is the core issue, left if it's your father. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3898 There are 3 levels of concern. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3899 Bachelor number-one,would you be willing to date a psychotherapist? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3900 Trouple troubles? 1.1528 0.05474 72 64 5 3
3901 You seem to have gotten this in vitro thing all wrong. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3902 My first recommendation is that you stop watching "This is Us". 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3903 Thanks for taking advantage of our Groupon 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3904 Hmmm....Yes, perhaps a triangular arrangement of the couches would have been more on point. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3905 Three-in-one therapy. Because all human problems come down to the same thing-- we're gonna die before we all agree to be compassionate to each other. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3906 Bachelor Number Three, if you were a tree...oh, sorry, wrong reality show 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3907 Why do you all say the Public Option is bunk? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3908 No,nothing personal; ego, id, and superego are just catchy names for the couches. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3909 Let's hear from your alter-ego first. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3910 This is a text book example of middle child syndrome. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3911 Freud never mentioned this, but your insurance companies will love it. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3912 I don't care if it's awkward for you, I don't get paid enough. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3913 Next time you should read the fine print before you buy a Groupon. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3914 Welcome to 3-for-the-price-of-1therapy! 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3915 Michael, David and Chester exchanged top and bottom couches this week. You remain in the middle. How does that make you feel? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3916 Vickie, next session you'll be the Id, and that means vocal. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3917 And you feel that you have three different personalities? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3918 The advantage here, is that you get to split the co-payment three ways. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3919 Just to clarify, the MPB after my name stands for Multiple People in Bunkbed therapy, not Masters in Psychiatric/ Behavioral Therapy. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3920 And how long have you felt that you didn't stack up, Mr. Phelps? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3921 Virtual therapy 1.1528 0.05474 72 64 5 3
3922 Sorry I wasn’t looking up from my pad...who’s mother didn’t do that? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3923 What did you expect? Seven billion people on the planet . . . something had to give. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3924 So Gabriel I take it you'te a bottom. Alexis, Jonathon let's talk. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3925 Will this be separate checks? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3926 When the ad said three sessions for the price of one, this wasn't what I had in mind. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3927 This is only going to work when one of you starts. So, Liesl, you start us off, then Kurt, and then Friedrich. Ready, 2, 3, 4....'Let's start at the very beginning..... A very good place to start...... 1.1528 0.05474 72 64 5 3
3928 I am sorry, but this group therapy session is all that your insurance policies permit. Now, before we get started does anyone have a fear of heights? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3929 Do you feel heard now? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3930 Why don't we start with that one night at summer camp? 1.1528 0.05474 72 64 5 3
3931 Again, I can only offer the group rate if you ALL continue to pay on time. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3932 It just amazes me how wrong you are on so many levels!!! 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3933 So the group rate saves time and money, right? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3934 University cut the mental health budget again. But I'm pretty sure you all have the same type of anxiety, so this should still work. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3935 We need to work some more on your sibling identity issues. We'll start with you ... um ... Sherrie? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3936 Okay, on to the Elimination Round. The category is ‘Poo Pourri’. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3937 You have to read the fine print with the groupons 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3938 Yes, this is how a three tier mental health plan works now. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3939 Tell me more about your fear of middle seats. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3940 Now, which one of you is a communist? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3941 Who wants to tell me when the throuple first got awkward? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3942 Thanks to Trump's second term, his new Unaffordable Care Act dictates that I have three simultaneous therapy sessions per hour. And, by the way, this will be $450 each. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3943 My problems just keep building up. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3944 Three at a time is always a charm. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3945 Remember everyone: this is The 3-for-1 Special, if you want to go deep, the Deluxe Individual Treatment will allow each patient to give their whole story... 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3946 And who originally called "top bunk"? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3947 You are home-schooled. His name is Shakespeare. You will be tested. If you fail, you can't go out. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3948 Therapy in the Managed Care era. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3949 No worries. In this room tiers are encouraged. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3950 You wanted Medicare For All with mental health covered. What did you expect? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3951 I've heard of groupthink but this... 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3952 Why? Because I read this old book by Henry Ford. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3953 Let's start by debunking the idea that one bunk is better than the other. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3954 Epstein didn't kill himself. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3955 So what I’m hearing is my new policy for reduced fee visits is bringing up some feelings. Andrew, let’s start with you... 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3956 Frankly, multiple personality disorder is good for my billing, yes. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3957 With regards to your question, yes I have heard of the game F--- Marry Kill, and no I will not be telling you my choices 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3958 It just seems your top down parenting isn’t working. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3959 Do you want the group rate or separate bills? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3960 Superego Ego Id 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3961 Wait, do I not get priority seating? That's depressing! 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3962 Since all of your traumas seem related to summer camp, I thought we’d try something different. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3963 The current stack does not reflect your stack ranking. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3964 Yes, as Dr. Threud said, the basic technique is "three association." 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3965 Very well. We’ll find out with time who ate my special alien bread. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3966 You asked for an AirB&B&B didn't uou? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3967 Ok, let's play crazy threes , instead of crazy eights! 1.1528 0.05474 72 64 5 3
3968 Your insurance is trying to cut costs... 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3969 We can each afford a third of a session 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3970 Ego and Id, how do you react to what Superego said? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3971 Trust me, congestion pricing is catching on. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3972 It's my new time share concept 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3973 So tell me, are more depressed now that your insurance company reduced my fee by 2/3? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3974 No, Carl, you're Id. You were Superego last week. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3975 I'm sorry. Your times are up. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3976 How may I help with your throuple relationship, sirs? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3977 So you woke up from a crazy dream, one in which you were plastic children's toys, and created this....triple decker couch? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3978 Yes, I can see you like family outings. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3979 Patient # 3: You're having THAT dream again, about killing Dad and dating Mom. In your ideal world, what weapon do you use and what do you wear? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3980 How does BOGO make you feel? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3981 Today's session will cover feelings of never being the sole focus. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3982 Now one at a time, tell me why you're always feeling overlooked. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3983 Let's start with you, Mary, what is it that makes you feel debunked? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3984 Can we please stop referencing 'This is Us?' 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3985 Trust me, there is no monster under this bed. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3986 Amy, I feel there is a connection between your bed wetting and your fear of heights. 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3987 Well, now, what seems to be the throuble? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
3988 I call it the reverse oreo cookie method 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
3989 Why do you feel everything in life is a struggle, top bunk? 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
3990 Based on what you have all said, it is my professional opinion that all three of you suck. Millenials? more like Moronials...amiright? Cindy sucks. Check! Ralph sucks. Check! and Dylan sucks! Check! Buncha idiots, get outa my three tiered sofa! 1.1519 0.04797 79 69 8 2
3991 Okay, so, the test results are back: Alex, you are paranoid schizophrenic. Rashaun, you are depressed. Lydia, you are going to be thirty and single. 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
3992 what makes you think your parents lord over you? 1.1507 0.05403 73 65 5 3
3993 No! It's my turn. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
3994 No, no, no, those inner voices are not real. 1.1507 0.05403 73 65 5 3
3995 Three for the price of one does not apply here. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
3996 Final choice, Gloria. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
3997 Take your friend with and receive a discount 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
3998 Just sit patiently and we'll have you turned around in no time. 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
3999 I didn't know this was group therapy. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4000 Welcome to our unhappy hour discount session :) 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4001 Before we begin, does anyone have to use the rest room , review their non disclosure agreement or need a security blanket? 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4002 We'll rotate positions as we progress with the uschowphobia treatment. The next phase will involve 'trust stuffing'. 1.1507 0.04216 73 64 8 1
4003 I realize this type of group therapy is different from what you're used to. Get over it. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4004 Okay, you're REALLY going to hate me for this, but I have to give you each a number. I'm getting confused. 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
4005 I know you said that there is a lot of weight on top of you, but that is no way to talk about the other patients 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
4006 Who needs to go to the bathroom? 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4007 I'm sick of hearing how out of control your lives are. 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
4008 Couples therapy took our relationship to new heights. 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
4009 For the group rate, you will have to decide who's Mother we will talk about. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4010 Since you have a reduced rate for your therapy, you are each allowed an opening statement of no longer than 60 seconds. Any rebuttals will be limited to 30 seconds. 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
4011 But if your kidding me, its full price. 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
4012 Thanks for using the app. Is that the first PsychoPool journey for any of you? 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4013 Yes, you get the group rate, but, obviously, not the confidentiality. 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
4014 Your insurance pays for one third of a psychiatrist each 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4015 At least there isn't a co-pay. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4016 Are we having fun at this group therapy session yet? 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4017 Very well Linda, you got to the top. That means its your turn to tell us all your shit. 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
4018 This is how the Three Stooges got started. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4019 Even if you didn’t pass the Hollywood Squares audition, I’M impressed. 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
4020 This is family therapy according to Freud. 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
4021 If you're complaining you obviously didn't read the fine print of the Groupon. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4022 Ms. Jones, What's YOUR take on mothers? 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
4023 It’s the latest industry disruptor from those West Coast techies 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4024 Heathcliff has the Garbage Ape, which is like the Easter Bunny, but he delivers trash. Think about that. 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
4025 So........ the Yankees lost again, ey? 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4026 Let's discuss everyone's favorite Cardi B song, I'll go first... It's a toss up between 'Cheap Ass Weave' and 'Bodak Yellow.' Alex, you strike me as someone who would like the melody of 'Stripper Ho.' Is that an accurate assumption? 1.1507 0.04645 73 64 6 2
4027 Now,will it all be on the same bill or spilt it? 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4028 So, does it feel like we are disrupting privilege NOW? 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4029 The first thing to understand is that bed wetting is really a trust issue. 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
4030 I hate testing early adopters during CES. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4031 SO Clearly he isnt vegan 1.1486 0.04164 74 67 4 2
4032 I call it the pack rat. 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
4033 We wanted to design a model similar to Uber pool. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4034 Alright everybody, let’s take it from the top. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4035 Is college this tough? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4036 Wait, this doesn't look like a threesome to me. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4037 Fear of heights you should have mentioned when we were setting up this group. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4038 Don‘t let their jealousy get to you! I’m sure you’re not just diversity hires. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4039 I was in Tokyo when this heath art came to me. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4040 So you see, essentially, that you all have the same issues. Except by taking in three at a time, I get three times the pay. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4041 Do you feel you've been impacted by the glass ceiling? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4042 Dr. Jones, I don’t believe these sessions are helping my multiple personality disorder” -Jon Torpey High Point, N 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4043 First Trump, now the market.” “First Trump, now the market.” “First Trump, now the market. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4044 So, she thinks she’s above you? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4045 Remind me - which one of you wants to stop trying polyamory? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4046 I call this therapy, ' If you're cracked, you're stacked.' 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4047 Michael, what makes you believe Harold and Marvin are putting you down? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4048 When, or should I say if, you are promoted to the top couch you may safely assume you will need only 15 years of additional therapy. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4049 Adding a fourth into the mix didn't spice things up? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4050 Which one again is the bed-wetter? 1.1486 0.04587 74 63 9 1
4051 Just a few more moments then we'll go out kayaking. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4052 Being the middle child is getting old. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4053 Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you said tier support group. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4054 Not every Oedipal complex can be solved 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4055 Roommates...Ruminate 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4056 Windows XP has stopped working: error: 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4057 Sally how'd you get up there 1.1486 0.04164 74 65 8 1
4058 Do you consider yourself to have a low, medium, or high interpersonal IQ? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4059 I don't think this is working. Let's have the next three come in. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4060 Groupon on and on. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4061 So, lets use the fact that you all have state health insurance as a starting point 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4062 Because of patient confidentiality, I can’t say which one, but one of you has a serious phobia of bunk beds that could lead to violent outbursts. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4063 Have you thought about setting clear boundaries? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4064 When multiple parts of self are equally activated.” (Adrienne Loker, LCSW 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4065 I was hoping for separate 50 minute sessions for each of your personalities. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4066 Cashing in your Groupon for group therapy is the reason why you can't identify with yourself. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4067 "Bunkbed therapy is not related to social standing. But yes John you are better looking than Tim." 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4068 And thank you for choosing the Costco triple stack psych pack 1.1486 0.03692 74 64 10 0
4069 You know it’s more cost-efficient! 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4070 Maybe the bedwetter should lie on the bottom. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4071 And remember, the one with the best self-effacing line gets to choose their bunk first next week! 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4072 Ah ok, before I put you in a deep sleep, which one of you has irritable bowel syndrome? 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4073 No, we can't flip for who speaks first! 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4074 I think you boys are getting a little to big for bedtime stories 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4075 Contestant number three - if your insurance doesn't cover this session, would you pay out of pocket? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4076 I have always been treated differently as the middle child 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4077 Just letting you know, I don't bunk bill. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4078 Just tell your Mother you can’t cancel the rest of yiur monthly appointments. I paid $5,000 for this triple bunk. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4079 Talk Therapy has now become Talk Therapies with Medicare for All. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4080 Yes, I’m familiar with Amway. 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4081 John, I’ll take the center square for the whine. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4082 Stop whining ! You all complained about my rates- now you can share the cost! 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4083 When did you first realize your ménage à trois dream had become a ménage à moi 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
4084 So, what’s it like always being on the top bunk of life? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4085 Now, on the count of three, I want you all to trade places." 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4086 Before our next session, try to find at least one example of your husband/wife/mother showing respect for your individuality. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4087 Just remember, future journalists, this session is "embargoed." 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4088 Another 4 years of this & I’m gonna need a bigger office. 1.1486 0.03692 74 63 10 0
4089 '"When would you sadid your obsession with Chinese checkers first manifest itself?" 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4090 Incidentally, I charge by the bunk. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4091 Problems of the same stature run deep within more than one 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4092 And what makes you think that your parents are always on top of you? 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4093 For tomorrow' s teamwork exercise you'll construct a club house for my grandchildren. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4094 How did you get this thing in my office? 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4095 Welcome to immersion therapy for bedwetters. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4096 Do we tell him he’s lactose intolerant? 1.1447 0.04474 76 66 9 1
4097 And for my records, which one of you actually bought the Groupon? 1.1447 0.04474 76 66 9 1
4098 It's your turn to go first. What did you want to tell mommy tonight? 1.1429 0.04678 70 60 8 1
4099 I've heard it all too many times, so just say, 'Piggybacking on that..' and add your bit. 1.1429 0.05102 70 62 6 2
4100 Tell the lady that the next available ladder'\ will be hers 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4101 Actually, Freud's dream theory was entirely debunked. 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4102 The DSM has a new definition for multiple personality disorder. 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4103 That theory's been debunked. 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4104 This is only for accounting. 1.1410 0.04366 78 67 9 1
4105 Group therapy is convenient because you share the cost, now patient number one... 1.1410 0.03966 78 67 11 0
4106 Sorry for the inconvenience. The Coronavirus scare has tripled my patient load. 1.1370 0.04497 73 63 8 1
4107 Do you think this qualifies as natural selection? 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
4108 It read the ‘who ate my cheese’ book 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4109 But... what if the rat is vegan? 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4110 How did you get up there with no ladder? 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
4111 Malcolm had the closest guess, but this week it’s according to your chances of winning an Oscar for Best Director. 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
4112 Just relax and try not to roll to one side or the other. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4113 Next, we will have a pillow fight 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4114 For heaven's sake, don't worry about the darned ladder. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4115 Yours problems might be different but you’re really the same person. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4116 You can be on top next time, Larry. 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
4117 Now, what are your inner-most thoughts...? And as I said before, don’t feel pressured. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4118 I've found that constant flashbacks are common for many of my patients in the "This Is Us" therapy group. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4119 Before we begin, anyone here a member of the Psychic Friends Network? 1.1364 0.04773 66 59 4 2
4120 Adolescent problems are all the same. At least I collect triple fees. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4121 Pretending to be The Three Stooges does come with issues... including the occasional eye poke and the collapsing bunk bed fiasco! 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4122 Talk about when you learned your white brothers were adopted. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4123 Tell me more about your fear of being talked over 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4124 Tell me about your airline flight and why you were uncomfortable 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4125 Bachelor number 2: If you were a phobia, what kind of phobia would you be? 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4126 I didn't expect there to be such a large response to the Groupon! 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
4127 You may be pleased to know that I'm submitting this therapeutic trifecta to the Guiness Book of Records 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4128 I don't usually treat bunkmates 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
4129 Batchelor number 2. What was the relationship with your mother? 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4130 There were many layers to Steve's multiple personality disorder. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4131 OK number 2 how does it make you feel when number 3 says that? 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4132 Group dynamics therapy allows us to shift from hourly compensation to piece-work. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4133 There's a text message for O'Malley. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4134 I know this office isn't really big enough for group or family therapy. 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
4135 Since when did you start feeling like someone else? 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4136 So let me get this straight: All of you are saying time share therapy is making you depressed? 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
4137 GROUPON NEVER GUARANTEED PRIVACY. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4138 Let ‘s start this family therapy session from the top. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4139 No, I'm afraid the hourly discount is 3.3% per patient, not 10% per patient. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4140 Does anyone have a more pressing issue to discuss than who gets the top bunk? 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4141 What did you expect from a Groupon session? 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4142 Y’all have elevated split personalities to a whole new level! 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4143 The therapist got a little overbooked But luckily... Someone invented the bunk couches 1.1364 0.03668 66 58 8 0
4144 Sorry. This is my busy time... 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4145 Let's explore this feeling of not getting individual attention 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4146 Ok, so let’s start with your first memories of summer camp... 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4147 As the three finalists in the Caption Contest, be aware two of you will soon need bereavement counseling. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4148 So what makes you always want to be on top? 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4149 Since today is three for the price of one, who wants to go first? 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4150 This is us, the years they don't show. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4151 When you said psychotherapy was bunk I thought you were speaking in slang terms. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4152 It's important that you understand that your insurance coverage doesn't permit you to listen in on my conversations with the others in the room. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4153 It seems you’ve done a little too well differentiating your multiple personalities. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4154 In five seconds you will wake up calm and refreshed with no memory of Facebook. Send in the next three on your way out. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4155 Your homework assignment was to watch "Jules et Jim." Arnold, what are you feeling now?" 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4156 Yes Carol! They are both beneath you. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4157 And, you said that you felt your worries were stacking up? 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4158 I think the rotation idea is the best option, but laundry is another story. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4159 When you buy a therapy session through Groupon... 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4160 IKEA's quality really has diminished... 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4161 The idea that every therapist is the same has been debunked. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4162 Surely, it's not too difficult to play 'spot the difference'! 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4163 So you think the people beneath you get all the attention? 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4164 So let's talk about your separation anxieties. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4165 Wha we proposed to in rease our services, this is t what I intended!? 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4166 We are going for the trifecta which involves all three agreeing to identifying the same solution to different problems. 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
4167 It's the 2020 election group discount. 1.1364 0.03668 66 55 8 0
4168 Now the Fun begins... 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4169 Since none of you individually could tell me with certainty how you felt about it, I decided to increase my statistical sample size and hopefully arrive at consensus 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4170 I’m detecting multiple personalities. 1.1364 0.05666 66 60 3 3
4171 Now I'm a patient too so every fifteen minutes we all get to change places. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4172 i can see how your passion for legos might be spilling over into your personal lives 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4173 Before we can talk about your OCD, I need you to come down and adjust the spacing between your bunks. 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
4174 Work Smarter Not Harder 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4175 Now that I have you all in a deep sleep, don't forget to empty your wallets of all your cash on your way out. Two minutes later, you will wake up feeling fully refreshed and forgotten that you ever visited my office today. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4176 I’ll give you a discount rate. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4177 Just a reminder-- any discussions of split personalities will void today's group rate. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
4178 We’re experimenting with a new arrangement where I triple my income without increasing my hours. How does that make you feel? 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
4179 Don't worry gentlemen, I'm a threelancer 1.1343 0.04197 67 58 9 0
4180 Due to recent layoffs, Penny had to take a multi-levelled approach at work. 1.1343 0.05164 67 60 5 2
4181 When did your discovering you're not triplets start to bother you? 1.1343 0.04705 67 59 7 1
4182 So, you had a three-some six month ago and now he is pregnant? 1.1343 0.04705 67 59 7 1
4183 If this group therapy is to be effective, you must all participate equally. 1.1343 0.04705 67 59 7 1
4184 Okay, raise your hand if your father withheld love and support. 1.1304 0.04576 69 61 7 1
4185 Welcome to Camp Freud! Before we get started do you have any dietary restrictions or Oedipal issues you wish to discuss? 1.1290 0.04292 62 54 8 0
4186 Is adrenaline junkie a separate column? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4187 Tina, your feelings are valid. Tim, you've made great progress today. Barney, you time is up. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4188 So, for a $10 analysis you were expecting Freud!? 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4189 Rack em Pack em Stack em Group therapy 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4190 I can only write one prescription so each of you will have to convince me that you’re the craziest. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4191 If you don't get results from our TheraPool approach, you can always upgrade to the Black or XL option 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4192 Let's see if we can unstack this family situation. Tommy,how about you go first? 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4193 So, you always think someone is talking behind your back. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4194 Welcome to the "why was I been dumped, and does my mother still love me?" session. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4195 Don't worry how you got here, tell me how you feel?" 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4196 OK, Patient 3 - any issues with heights? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4197 Now let's break this Oedipal complex down into simpler terms. Jimmy why don't you start by telling your father how you want to marry your mother? 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4198 An the end of your treatment, we'll help you with the therapy addiction too! 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4199 Why bother using manualized treatments with only one patient at a time, when it saves even more money to insurance companies if you just stack them up? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4200 Don’t all speak at once! 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4201 When your parents sent you to Camp Freud, how did that make you feel? 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4202 I hope you don’t mind. This election year has me so busy I’ve been triple-booked until 2021. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4203 We feature efficient batch processing by multitasking psychologists. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4204 I only listen to the one on top, it’s trickledown psychologics. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4205 No, it’s not triple billing—- it’s Sex therapy and I get paid extra because it’s an interracial group. any of you gay? 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4206 Now you shall teleport the ball to your friend above. 1.1270 0.05766 63 58 2 3
4207 This is honestly what I call group therapy! 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4208 Now if I could just get that Groupon promo code again, we can get started. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4209 I have to start by informing you that threesome relationships rarely work and threesome psychotherapy never works. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4210 Welcome to Week 4 of the bunk bed phobia program. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4211 One of you will be the least depressed after your joint session. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4212 I like it that you men are letting Sarah think she's winning... 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4213 Now, which one of you was on top when you were children? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4214 I'm trying to decide if I need to charge triple rate for your bringing both alter egos to this session... 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4215 Yours is the most advanced case of multiple personality disorder I’ve ever seen. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4216 Thanks to Groupon you'll get a third of the insight but only a third of the pain. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4217 I understand the relationship but I’m confused about the pregnancy. 1.1270 0.05766 63 58 2 3
4218 Hello, and welcome to Bunk Beds Anonymous. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4219 Now, tell me why you feel you suffer from multiple personality disorder. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4220 So each of you thought your caption was funnier than the three finalists for the pirates in the subway /walking the plank cartoon? That's funny, I did too! 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4221 Just keep asking yourself, “what would John Ritter do?” 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4222 Helen, don't you think we've reached the point where someone else can be on top? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4223 You are not crazy..Fake news is not real. No man is above the law. We do have a Constitution with separation of powers and truth does exist 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4224 To fully experience the benefits of Gestalt Therapy, we'll have two additional layers next session. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4225 Now when was it you all first met? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4226 It’s going to take a lot to fix me, myself, and I. Robin Bath -New Hyde Park, NY. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4227 Patient A, tell me about your feelings of insignificance. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4228 I understand your feelings of guilt by using Groupon today to save money. We're making a real breakthrough here! 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4229 So when did you start having your "This Is Us" fantasy? 1.1270 0.05303 63 57 4 2
4230 I hope you don't mind that I stacked my appointments. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4231 Did you bring your Groupon? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4232 We are new to throuples therapy, but we’re determined” 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4233 Now, which one is the sleep-walker? 1.1270 0.05303 63 57 4 2
4234 Sorry, Jimmy and Sam. The top couch is for patients that stay on TOP of their journals. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4235 Id, Ego, Superego 1.1270 0.05303 63 57 4 2
4236 Was it hard growing up the oldest, the youngest, the middle child? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4237 Do you all like Club sandwiches? 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4238 You may alternate turns speaking and draw on whichever narratives you find most appropriate. Thanks guys! 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4239 Is everyone comfortable with their bunk level? And tell me about your response. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4240 Someone finally took advantage of the Groupon." 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4241 All righty then ... looks like we've solved 1/3rd of your problems. That'll be $33.33. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4242 What did you think I meant when I asked if you wanted to sell the air rights to your sessions? 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4243 No, I do not offer a discount to thruples. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4244 Remember, you are in the "trust bunk," so speak freely ... but about a third as much. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4245 Once you process the reality of sharing your therapist’s attention, semi-private personal therapy is super fun! 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4246 Time shares new approach to the rising cost of health care. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4247 Unfortunately, those of you in the lower tiers will be ignored completely. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4248 Thank you for using Shrinkpool. Which one of you has the least severe phobia? 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4249 Okay, who here is the superego? 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4250 Do you kids mind if I write my book in here while you watch your movie? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4251 First, here's a question I ask all my clients. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4252 Yes, you can pay with the Uber POOL app. 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4253 And can you tell me why you don't want to work at Foxconn any longer? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4254 I am so glad you are all here, as triplets maybe now we can get to the bottom of the nature/nurture debate. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4255 Everyone agrees you could be the one to break the glass ceiling 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4256 Remember, no matter how overwhelming your problems may seem, you will each get therapy for only one third my standard rates. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4257 Do you think this is really worth the group rate? 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4258 Sorry, we'll have to come back to your feelings of neglect later. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4259 So for choosing to ‘therapy share’ on the app, you will each only pay 1/3 of the total bill 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4260 Last week you mentioned your fear of living in someone else’s shadow... 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4261 It'll give us so much extra space in our room to do activities. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4262 Hmmm, maybe taking advantage of that 67% discount wasn't such a great idea after all..." 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4263 It called 'Stack Therapy.' 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
4264 My exposure group therapy approach for your fear of heights, claustrophobia and gephyrophobia was forced upon me by your hoarding parents. A discount will apply. 1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
4265 Dicount's, Discount's !!! 1.1250 0.04395 72 64 7 1
4266 Now, who wants to begin? Jules? Jim 1.1250 0.04725 64 57 6 1
4267 Now, for our menage a trois therapy session 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
4268 I think the real problem with your multiple personality disorder is that you think you're all one person 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
4269 Elon cannot be serious about this... 1.1212 0.05511 66 61 2 3
4270 I told you not to pick the one from the pilot experiment... 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4271 Well that explains the gas station 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4272 Veaganism is the mother of invention. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4273 This subject is from the internet - free control group 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4274 mashanegunkelly 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4275 I told you, if we give them the option theyll just use it everytime. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4276 Maybe we should do the same with the cat 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4277 Abhh...the power of cheese! 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4278 Maybe we shouldn’t have added the jet 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4279 I'm going to need you all to try and resolve your inner-traumas at the same time for this joint session to really work. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4280 ...and what do you regard as the most challenging aspect of a blended family...? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4281 And how does that make you feel? And how does that make you feel? And how does that make you feel? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4282 In order to further expedite the therapy process, I've pre-printed our discussion of your assumed oedipal complexes. Once I've finished highlighting the important points, the session will be over and you can send the next group in. 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4283 It’s a good thing there are not more of us in this group therapy session... 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4284 Let's start from the top. What happened at the camp you went to in middle school? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4285 E unum pluribus. How did you do it? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4286 I think the issue of codependency is pretty obvious 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4287 First, I'd like to explore your pole-dancing fantasies. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4288 And what makes you think you have dissociative identity disorder?” Michael Morneault, Durham, N 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4289 Social networking enters the mental support business. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4290 I began teen counseling at a summer camp. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4291 Just because the little piggy pulled off the lid and boiled the wolf, don't presume that you three will be so lucky. Get your house in order!" 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4292 Feelings of jealousy are completely normal. However, as we discussed, the seating will rotate each week. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4293 I think its time for a bigger apartment. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4294 I just worry I’m not on top of things 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4295 No, based on my experience, I don’t in fact believe this is how multiple personality syndrome begins. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4296 A smaller office,yes,but it’s big enough to fit in all the Sander’s people now. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4297 Groupon was not the way to go." "I should have passed on the 3 for 1 deal." "So, what's on your minds? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4298 Buy one get two free. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4299 I might suggest waking up to trisect your feelings. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4300 So, tell my why you feel you've hit rock bottom bunk 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4301 Guys, we really need to read the fine print on the Groupon next time. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4302 Which one of you ate all the cookies? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4303 What’s important is that you’re here, tiered or otherwise. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4304 Why don’t we start by identifying personal pronouns . . . 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4305 Now that we have made progress on the co-dependency issues, we move on to fitness ability as we end our session. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4306 Let's start this week's session talking about my mother. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4307 When you're in charge you can design your own Oedipal triangle. 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4308 Our parents never gave me any attention. I think it’s because I’m the middle bunk. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4309 If your name is Ed on the bottom bunk, then on the middle and top bunks but be Ego & Superego. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4310 I don’t think Freud got his start this way” 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4311 I have asked you thrice now to stop calling this Throuple Therapy; you're all related! Which brings us back to square one........ 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4312 Let me throw this question out to you Amy...on top 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4313 I am sorry to inform you but group discount applies to five or more people. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4314 Let's take it from the top, shall we? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4315 Yes, confidentiality is an issue. But the money you save on Co-pays... 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4316 Welcome to what the insurance company calls quantum therapy. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4317 As you know, the loser this week won’t be invited to next week’s session in Bali. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4318 Yes, express therapy is efficient. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4319 I should have mentioned that my research is in *monozygotic" triplets. 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4320 It's clear you can't see eye to eye. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4321 Hi, and welcome to Dr Anne's low cost psychotherapy. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4322 Sorry Janet, lowest deductible, last one to use the toilet. 1.1167 0.05867 60 56 1 3
4323 And why do you feel like psychiatry is bunk? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4324 Do you travel together often? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4325 Now, let's talk about your attachment issues. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4326 There's very few cases of split personality that I truly believe are valid. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4327 Yes. Medicare for all increases anxiety. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4328 Did you all bring your Groupon for the $35 counseling session? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4329 So your mothers all sent you away to boarding school. How does that make you feel? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4330 Unfortunately, Frugal Personality Disorder does not qualify for the group therapy discount. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4331 You suffer from multiple persons disorder. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4332 Starting at the top: when did you suspect that you have a Groupon problem? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4333 Fuck, marry, kill is about to get a lot more illegal. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4334 So you rotate the top bunk every term and believe the 2020 president will be a white female? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4335 So, how long have you felt that you had multiple personalities? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4336 Fortunately this is covered by your group insurance. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4337 Three is too much more than one. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4338 With the ever-increasing threat of the coronavirus, anxious patients participate in a "group therapy" session, avoiding close contact, before boarding their plane! 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4339 So which one of you thinks your Moe? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4340 ‘Trichiatry for troubled teens’ 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4341 Did you all remember to put hands on stomachs? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4342 What better way to discuss multi level marketing. LetD69B 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4343 It really feels like Doug has started to interfere with our marriage. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4344 I feel like I suffer from Middle Child Syndrome 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4345 And Judith, Henry, how did it make you feel to hear Karl's parents were getting divorced when he was 8? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4346 I can accept your Groupon this time but please call ahead in the future. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4347 My observations are that it will be a brokered convention. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4348 No, we don't serve meals or drinks while you're on the bunks. If we did, food and drinks will spill on those of you in the lower bunks. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4349 Let's all discuss your phobia of triple decker BLTs. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4350 Has your fear of missing out improved since our last session? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4351 You all have the same bunk-bed phobia and I am charging you only a third of my usual fee. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4352 Why do you feel your dream is always that you're a man named Jacob? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4353 Number 2 - What is your greatest achievement? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4354 I think I'm losing interest in email. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4355 Affordable therapy! 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4356 Why do I always feel like the outsider in this Mental a trois? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4357 Well, 'Three's Company,' your not! 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4358 ‘This saves you money. The stories are the same, just different characters 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4359 And how does it make you feel sharing a microstudio? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4360 It's been around for a while, it's called camp counseling. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4361 I believe you are experiencing these memories and feelings as if you had a multiple personality disorder. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4362 Now THIS is how to do group therapy! 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4363 My services are covered by your HOA dues. Does condo life trigger any early memories when you had trouble sharing with others? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4364 Why yes, I am new to Throuples Counseling. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4365 Now, I’d like each of you to calmly explain why you’re living back in your old bedroom. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4366 What are your earliest memories of camp? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4367 Sorry we have to triple up and there's no ladder. You know cutbacks are so bad nowadays. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4368 Definitely a case of split personality. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4369 Fran says Chip is yours and you are just tan. How does that make you feel Jasper? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4370 Welcome to Uber Shrink Share. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4371 So,who is ready to speak today? Superego, why don’t you start; you look so eager...Wait,stop! Not all at once....you will all have equal time...this is about Mindfulness sharing.... 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4372 It's a new form of multi level marketing; we're trying it for therapy 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4373 And I'll be putting you on the same medication for your respective problems. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4374 Woody Allen's new masterpiece - a Mod Squad reboot in throuple counseling. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4375 When did boys become aware of Campus Counseling’s special rates for triple occupancy? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4376 I hope you all don't mind, my vacation starts tomorrow and I want to get the hell out of here. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4377 Patient #2, if you could go back in time and be a fly on the wall in your parents' bedroom, would you find, a)that their lovemaking was tender? b) sadomasochistic? or, c) that they watched Leno each night before going to sleep in separate beds? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4378 And what happened after you got locked in the couchette? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4379 ...and I'll need a co-payment from each of you. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4380 Disclaimer: Behavioral science is an oxymoron. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4381 I thought you might learn from each other's mistakes. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4382 Who had the terminal illness thingy again? Just raise your hand please. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4383 Share the cost psychoanalysis. What are you all thinking? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4384 In order for therapy to work one of you will have to be the superego. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4385 Take me back to the first day of your Hosteling experience. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4386 Today's econo-shrink session will go from top - down. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4387 Our gender reassignment program has yet to embrace expectant males." . 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4388 This is the new Socialism Psychiatry medical plan. Mary has a job, so she must pay for herself and at least two other freeloaders. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4389 Third Wheeling Couples Therapy 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4390 As a matter of fact, Yes, I do regret registering with Groupon. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4391 At the group rate, none of you should be too hopeful about results. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4392 -...and his name was “Musa”. -That’s bananas. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4393 I am sorry, middle bunk, but your time's up. Your turn, bottom bunk. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4394 How that we have the hierarchy established we will start our session on status acceptance. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4395 Katie, Randall, Kevin, You Must Understand. This Is Us Time. We’re Never Going To Make Progress... If We Keep Going Backwards And Forward And Backwards And Forward... David B Smith, Miami Beach, FL 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4396 Realizing that a lot of my problems stem from my parents. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4397 Luckily, all three of you blame your mother for all your problems. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4398 OK my siblings, pro bono time is over. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4399 So, I dare to ask, 'What's all the funk about? And, don't give me any bunk?' 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4400 Last but not least, how do you feel about polyamory, Tiffany? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4401 I charge extra for blankets and peanuts. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4402 I have been told to increase my productivity. You all have the same issue. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4403 Contestant number two: How would you describe a superego date? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4404 Everything you say is bunk. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4405 When is your release date? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4406 I’m beginning to suspect a multiple personality disorder... 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4407 Questions? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4408 I don't want to hear about your fathers. You're meant to have three personalities. You're three people. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4409 I promise that group therapy can be very helpful. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4410 This requires three-thinking. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4411 Throuple therapy poses some challenges in office set up! 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4412 There are three tiers of neurosis. Today we will assign you to a level within your comfort zone. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4413 Well, it's clear that we'll have to change the format of "Naked and Afraid" for the next season. So now, let's work on "Afraid" 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4414 O.K., who wants to start with a confession. Open up guys. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4415 So how long have you had the not enough room on the coach issue? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4416 Three blind mice, and I have to wake them up! 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4417 Pre-Jeopardy loss counseling 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4418 Surge pricing will apply. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4419 Yes! This is the only kind of mental health treatment your health plan permits. And no, it is NOT group therapy. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4420 In light of cutbacks in insurance reimbursements, let's all give this "cheaper by the threesome" approach to therapy a chance. We'll work our way down, OK? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4421 Since I'm treating each of you for claustrophobia this approach seems the most effective use of my time and a practical exercise for you. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4422 We’re here to debunk your beliefs about insomnia. 1.1167 0.05867 60 56 1 3
4423 I understand you are here to work on your Groupon addiction. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4424 Remember when we moved down to this godforsaken neighborhood and fought for regentrification. This is what that got us. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4425 Well, yes, but you did get the family rate. 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4426 Do you feel you are establishing a hierarchy here? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4427 Why the sad faces? You’re paying one-third of my normal hourly rate each? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4428 Welcome to polyamorous psychotherapy. Who'd like to begin? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4429 Let’s start talking about your relative on the upper bunk bed 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4430 I really hope you're practicing mindfulness..also, the Groupon for three-for-price-of-one expires after four sessions. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4431 Go ahead, I'm listening. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4432 Since you all seem to share the same DSM code and you all expressed an urgency to come in, I thought this might be helpful. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4433 Group, individual, therapy, in depth, for medicare for all. Also known as GIT ID. Rose next week you get the bottom bunk. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4434 Sessions are in-network. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4435 I’ll talk to your other 3 personalities at the next session. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4436 So, you learned you were not triplets at summer camp. How did that make you feel? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4437 Wanda, why you wore a skirt today, I'll never understand. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4438 Anybody up for Three Card Monty? 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4439 No, you don't have multiple personality disorder. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4440 Uber Pool Therapy, you are all having the same nightmare. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4441 I'm just going to ask one more time. What the hell are you looking at? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4442 I'm sorry that I haven't had time to introduce you to each other, but we're under a really crushing patient load. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4443 In these group sessions we always start at the top. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4444 So, let me explain how Groupon therapy works...... 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4445 On a scale of 1 to 3, how does that make you feel? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4446 Patients--this is my way of de-bunking group therapy:" From Vipin Bery,Toronto 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4447 ...And how does the phrase "bad things come in threes" make you feel? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4448 You know Maslow's hierarchy of needs? I call this Harlow's tower of codependence. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4449 ..And you say you found us on Groupon? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4450 Now, some people might tell you that group therapy is a lot of bunk... 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4451 This family trifecta: cash only. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4452 No, I am actually charging each of you the full rate 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4453 My siblings finish on top at everything. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4454 No, I do not think you have multiple personalities. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4455 And when did your split personality fears begin? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4456 My treatments will be based on your hierarchy of needs. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4457 See you guys later. I need a massage. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4458 Ok,Bob, would you like us how you feel about being in the middle? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4459 Group therapy may be a bit overrated! 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4460 Sorry but it was in the fine print of the groupon... 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4461 Now that your insurance policies' time share clauses are clear, who's first? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4462 Rodney, tell me why you feel neglected. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4463 Frankly I don't see this is helpful for your empty nest syndrome. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4464 And Robert, what makes you think you have middle child syndrome? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4465 So why do we feel the need to eat poop? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4466 You guys said you wanted a discount. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4467 Welcome! Please tell me everything: how it all started, why it is still a problem for you and who do you think is to blame. Your insurance policy entitles you to a 45-minutes psychotherapy session. Thank you for your co-operation. 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4468 Who can remember the last conversation they had without texting? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4469 And why do you think your mother also put you in the bottom bunk? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4470 I haven't ruled out co-dependence, I'm keeping an open mind" 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4471 Helen, it was inevitable that Brad and Henry were also going to start dreaming about their wicked stepmothers and ruined prom dresses. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4472 Picking finalists from last week’s contest. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4473 Please don't all talk at once. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4474 I understand you’re triplets, so tell me when did this obsession with “This Is Us” begin? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4475 Before starting your family counseling, I wanted to be sure you're arranged correctly, highest to lowest rank? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4476 From top to bottom. Tell me your best dream. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4477 This is good work, now let’s expand on why you always feel like others are above you. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4478 Now that we’ve addressed your sandwich phobia, I’d like to talk about your middle child issues. 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4479 Office of Mary, the Menage a trois Therapist 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4480 Okay, this is the first time I've treated a black man in my office; I can do this. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4481 Hello and welcome to your first Amtrak Viewliner therapy session 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4482 This is Medicare for All...at once. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4483 Regardless of your current position, I trust none of you will come to think of throuples therapy as just bunk. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4484 Psycho number one, this one’s for you. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4485 Sorry, Stephanie, this is what you get for agreeing to a menage a trois. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4486 My insurance carrier now requires me to say that although you may disagree with my therapy methods, you may not take the word “debunk” literally. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4487 The deal is that everybody pays one-third. No discount for having to climb. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4488 You want a group rate? Just get out. All of you. Now. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4489 Next, top floor, what is your problem. You are on the clock 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4490 It would help if you didn’t all talk at the same time. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4491 Alright, guys. Who's gonna let the other speak? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4492 I'm not sure what you expected with a Groupon. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4493 I’m bad at my job and the state should take away my license to practice therapy 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4494 I understand you may feel a tad uncomfortable at first, but I assure you the group rate is worth the inconvenience. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4495 I did say there was a discount on Mondays. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4496 Thus I can increase my productivity threefold without shortening your appointments. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4497 Now imagine how you might re-arrange your world without social media. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4498 Only one of you can have adoption issues. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4499 Well I think all three of you are too cheap with yourselves 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4500 All kids in a stack, oh what fun! 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4501 So how did that make you feel? You first, Alice. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4502 Freud himself went to summer camp. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4503 Technically, you aren’t supposed to use all three of the Groupon sessions in one appointment 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4504 Patient #1. Tell me again why you always like you are on the bottom. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4505 Yes he’s driven you three mad. But my Practice proves Trump’s been good for business! 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4506 Of course I don't do deliveries. Shall we move on? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4507 So tell me about your mother - that one's for patient number 2. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4508 OK, Thompson Twins, what's your problem? And don't give me any lip synced answers,,,, 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4509 Welcome to your first copay-free Tier 3 session. 1.1167 0.05363 60 55 3 2
4510 I know you're having feelings of insignificance, but this is group therapy. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4511 You each seem to remember that evening at the Goldilocks youth camp with quite the different perspective. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4512 So my accountant said “Psychotherapy- bunk ‘em.” 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4513 My office manager used to work for JoS. A. Bank. She suggested this 'Buy One, Get Two Free' promotion. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4514 Well, this is what you get when you buy your therapy at Costco. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4515 This is stacking up to be Multiple Personality Disorder, I'm afraid. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4516 May I suggest a long trenchcoat next time? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4517 I knew I'd regret choosing "pool" option for this appointment. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4518 Well, it's either a 10% increase in your rent, or another bunk mate! 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4519 We could save a lot of time if I just write you one large prescription. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4520 .. and you say the last guy is from.. northeast Pennsylvania? And he doesn´t feel included, is that it? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4521 You say you feel like everyone is treating you like you’re still in college? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4522 Many couples wait too long before seeking help to repair their relationship with their couples therapist. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4523 Before we get started, I'll need to see your Groupon vouchers. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4524 Now I want to hear the whole story from the beginning; starting from the bottom bunk. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4525 Freudian analysis has been debunked for years. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4526 Please don't look for swear words in the tassels of my rug. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4527 I have never dealt with a split three ways personality before. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4528 Yes, my Frequent Therapy Hours plan does have its drawbacks. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4529 Tell me more about this neopolitan ice cream craving! 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4530 Sorry. New insurance rules. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4531 It is a new take on group therapy. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4532 Family therapy only works if one of you starts " 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4533 What do you mean by "Three's a crowd"? 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4534 See doctor nothing has changed just like when we were kids we all want top bunk but Bobby always gets what he wants 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4535 I'd rather be clear, coming at three won't make the twelve-step program shorter. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4536 So you saw my 30% Off Groupon Coupon Therapy session at the Bed Bath & Beyond going out of business sale 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4537 And why do you think your parents are helicopter parents? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4538 Your love triangle is way too intense so I'm keeping you apart. 1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
4539 This session, let's try three association. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4540 What did you think TriCare Insurance meant. 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4541 So, one of you decide to leave the polyamory? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4542 so, what was that about the third amendment? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4543 S0, do we have a consensus ??? 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
4544 Well YOU'RE the idiots who wanted Socialism! 1.1148 0.04732 61 55 5 1
4545 Welcome to this session of group therapy for multiple personalities. 1.1129 0.05196 62 57 3 2
4546 And where do you think this FOMO comes from? 1.1129 0.04659 62 56 5 1
4547 I got a really good deal on this triple couch, I'm not sure I like the color yet, though! 1.1127 0.04279 71 63 6 1
4548 I'd say this is a severe case of split personality disorder AND split bunks! 1.1061 0.03150 66 60 5 0
4549 I see what you meant by cheese-wiz... 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4550 Lets try this again without Algernon 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4551 Sometimes the people I work with are dumber than this rat 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4552 I said rat pack, not jetpack 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4553 I told you not to leave your intermittent fasting book near their cage, Robert 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4554 Submit it to @IGNOBELS 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4555 It's called TheraPool, like the Uber but for depression. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4556 Welcome to the High Occupancy Therapy session. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4557 Now, which tier of health coverage were you again? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4558 So it says here that one of you is agoraphobic, one is claustrophobic, and one is acrophobic... but it doesn't say which is which. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4559 Think of yourselves collectively as one mind. And each of you represents one part. The lower bunk is the Id, the middle is the Ego, and the upper is the Superego. Now let's see what you folks can figure out together. 1.1053 0.05418 57 53 2 2
4560 What brings you to throuple’s therapy? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4561 And how does separate checks make you feel? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4562 Well this Groupon is just ridiculous. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4563 ...and which one of you has the Groupon? 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4564 So what I’m hearing is that you folks are having trouble seeing eye to eye 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4565 Hey, the Groupon said it was for a group! 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4566 Your separation anxiety as a family is layered and overwhelming. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4567 The psychiatric community won't accept my observance of how you two got onto the upper couches. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4568 As we discussed last week Tik Tok is not useful to theses sessions. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4569 OK, acrophobia on top, claustrophobia in the middle, bedwetting on the bottom. You get five minutes each, going by disorders in alphabetical order. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4570 You're all here to address your problems with sharing. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4571 Before we get started, I'd like to go over the terms of your groupon. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4572 You can Venmo me on the way out. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4573 She says I'm only half the man she needs 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4574 Let's put this to bed until our next session. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4575 So what do you think of "Berth Order Theory"? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4576 I will refer to you as co-dependent specimens A, B, and C 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4577 I'd like to know which 2 of you think there should be a ladder available. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4578 You each have two minutes to debate your plan on how to deal with your Oedipal Complex. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4579 What can't you Groupon now a days? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4580 If you would just stop talking over each other we could make some real progress. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4581 It helps me to recall at a glance the level of transparency (high, medium, low) each of you have displayed in our previous sessions“. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4582 Group think may be a contributing factor. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4583 Look at it this way...You now get three therapies in the time you used to have only one. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4584 Our policy states we can only split the bill two ways. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4585 Three for one or one for three!? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4586 What thought is it that brings you to tears 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4587 Sure it’s a little unorthodox, but in these trying times we’ve had to get creative with the discounts we offer. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4588 Debunking the middle child syndrome. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4589 Well, it's actually quite common. We refer to it as "sandwich syndrome". 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4590 Trio-Therapy 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4591 You did ask for a lower co-pay. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4592 Let’s start off with low self esteem, work through middle school bullies, and finish on a high note with acrophobia 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4593 You’ve all successfully completed sleepover therapy so you’re eligible to go to Tommy’s sleepover birthday party! 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4594 With group therapy, I can three times as many patients every day. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4595 Psychoanalysis summer camp 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4596 Now tell me why sleeping like this is a good idea? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4597 Here is our last session. Any advice for my broken heart? 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4598 What did you expect when you found out your insurance only covered group psychoanalysis? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4599 Let's be clear about this--there's absolutely nothing, nothing wrong with needing to feel special. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4600 No, I do not offer friends and family discounts. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4601 So, I think I know which one of you has been pilfering your communal fridge. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4602 Three hundred dollars an hour to lie on your couch and get hypnotized? I could get 2 full body massages for that!! 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4603 OK, so your parents couldn't afford a house with more than two bedrooms? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4604 I am now compliant with the new mandatory 15 hour work week 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4605 3 in 1? I thought it said 3 FOR 1! 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4606 The therapy will start right after nappy time. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4607 You’re all single, and you all have mother issues, that’s how therapy pool works. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4608 Separation anxiety is very normal for participants in a human centipede, and that's what we're here to work through. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4609 My two partners are on vacation 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4610 Well that's all the time we have. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4611 Yes, such behavior may be indicative of multiple personality disorder, but other factors must be taken into account." 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4612 Couch #3 - tell me about you mother but keep it brief! 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4613 When I do 'Three-for-the-money,' you get twenty minutes apiece. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4614 Having a session with three patients at once will not lower your required payment. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4615 No, the three-for-one deal on Amtrak was sold out. 1.1053 0.04101 57 50 6 0
4616 Until Sander's Medicare for all this is the best I can do for family counseling. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4617 Have you always life is stacked against you. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4618 I just don't think I'm professionally prepared for thruples therapy, yet. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4619 Just so you know, the ad said 'Therapist', not 'Ventriliquist'... I'm good but I can't make your problems disappear today. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4620 I have your sleep study results. You all have wandering bed syndrome. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4621 Do you feel more comfortable being on the top, the bottom, or the middle and which rung should be for the woman, the Black man, and the White man. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4622 Friends going to therapy together after a night "with the boys." 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4623 Think of this as a variation of group therapy without having to see them. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4624 The tricycle? 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4625 Sing more about where you're at today. 1.1053 0.05418 57 53 2 2
4626 Tell me how you feel in 5 minutes or less. There's a line outside. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4627 You're receiving an astonishing service. I have triple personality. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4628 Once upon a time, there were three bears 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4629 Sorry, the buy two get one free psychotherapy sale ended last month. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4630 No. You are not blind. You are not mice. When I snap my fingers, you will wake up. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4631 I apologize, I know this may be highly unorthodox, but it seems to be the only way we can treat everyone in debt from student loans. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4632 Which is better - top or bottom? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4633 After years of back and forth with the city, Karen finally got her office re-zoned as multi-patient. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4634 Superego, how do you feel about what Ego just said? 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4635 Ok. Who’s Id. who’s Ego, who’s Superego? 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4636 It's the new American social order, Steve. Get over it. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4637 Well, I first considered 'stacking therapy' when I . . . 1.1053 0.05418 57 53 2 2
4638 John, I noticed you took the bottom bunk, your wife is on the top and your surrogate is in the middle. Talk to me about this. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4639 Well not everyone has to be a top... 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4640 I believe you are all suffering from BPD: Bunked Person Disorder. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4641 So you feel like you never stood out from the crowd 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4642 So, it's the Mod Squad plus one. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4643 It’s an old Freudian technique. Mother on top. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4644 It's my little way remembering the rate I charge you for your session. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4645 Bachelor number three, why do YOU think she left you? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4646 Oh hell yeah a fuckstack! 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4647 So, how do you feel about the new artwork on the wall? 1.1053 0.05418 57 53 2 2
4648 Let's see, that's an order for one low roast, one middle roast and one high roast coffees. 1.1053 0.05418 57 53 2 2
4649 You each have one-third of our 50 minute session to describe your case - so start talking. This is what we technopsycholingualtherapists refer to as 'preemptive multi-blabbing'" 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 3 1
4650 I’d like to explore an Oedipal intervention in today’s session. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4651 How I feel when talking to customer support on computer chat. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4652 Groupon, it’s just one benefit of this kind of session. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4653 It’s not impersonal-it’s practical. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4654 Let's talk about parallel play. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4655 It’s a threefer. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4656 Okay number 3 please recount that summer camp experience again and numbers 1 and 2 fingers in your ears. I can’t afford another HIPAA violation. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4657 Now, a layered response: everybody sing, Row, Row, Row your boat gently down the stream... 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4658 Have any of you tried Threeapy before? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4659 Can we dialogue about this? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4660 Group Therapy is taken to different levels. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4661 So, which one of you believes thay have a different Dad. Rebecca Hawkins, M.D. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4662 So, family, how are things stacking up back at the house? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4663 We're not making much progress in solving The Three-Body Problem. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4664 h irbhur 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4665 Could the bedwetter take the bottom bunk? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4666 It was actually your insurance company that developed this new Machiavellian therapy. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4667 So, how does it feel to be on top? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4668 Bachelor #2: where would you take me on a first date knowing that I have an MBA, am an ENFJ, need gluten free options, & like to code? 2 & 2... we’ll be right back atchu 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4669 Bring your problems to another person 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4670 So this is Group Therapy 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4671 Almost done for the pilot of my first series. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4672 The couch you are on has no bearing on your worth as a person or a patient. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4673 We've decided to take a different approach to "group therapy" 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4674 No, your daughter requested individual therapy. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4675 Alright. Today we are all here to unpack what happened at band camp 17 years ago. Let's begin. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4676 This isn't exactly what I meant when I said I wanted a second opinion. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4677 i still say this is not a good way to save money. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4678 So imagine the spectacular night that your Mom first met Mo, Larry & Curley 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4679 Let me start by saying I'm finding it hard to divide my fee of $500 for your 50 minutes session into 3. How does that make you feel? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4680 I am sorry, but you'll have to pay for three anyway 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4681 This is group therapy. From the top down you are manic,depressive and too lazy to climb to an upper bunk 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4682 Sorry, this is the only way keep therapy costs low in the American Health System 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4683 Ancestry.com family therapy: “...triplets separated at birth, bio dad was a sperm donor, 300 sibling DNA matches (including a former prom date), depression resulting from having to replace kilts with lederhosen...” 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4684 Top bunks are reserved for our platinum elite customers, tissues are a whole different package. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4685 Okay, who wants to trade their fear of heights for claustrophobia. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4686 And they said an app was the only way to scale 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4687 I thought my Dad said psychotherapy was -junk- science... 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4688 So which personality am I talking to now? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4689 Let's start there Linda....just how long HAVE you been afraid of heights? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4690 Memories of sleep-over camp. Who wants to start us off? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4691 When did you first show signs of 3 different personalities? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4692 First and foremost, thank you all for participating in our Rxl pilot program this afternoon... 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4693 It's the way we always do throuples therapy 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4694 This is not what I meant by the Family Plan! 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4695 I'm not so sure about this Discount Psychology thing. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4696 First, I’d like to thank you all for using the coupons and secondly tell me about your mothers. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4697 Should I split the bill? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4698 Your insurance covers only a third of the cost. so you'll have to triple up. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4699 I see you have Oreo Syndrome, but isn't the middle supposed to be the cream? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4700 And yes...we can work out a group discount. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4701 Truthfully? I’m trying to kill all three of you birds with one session! 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4702 Sleeping together" is an expression relating to sexual intimacy -- not this 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4703 With thousands of democrats experiencing the identical recurring nightmares, I feel that treating only 3 of you at a time is going to take at least 4 more years. How does that make you feel Nancy? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4704 In trio-therapy, we take turns complaining 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4705 I don't care who smelt it. No Mexican before our sessions! 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4706 We're the picks of the litter 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4707 To begin with, each of you describe the incident which caused you to sentenced to explore the reasons for your mutual hatreds? 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4708 I'll suggest who's sick after the group interview 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4709 I want to see you team building skills 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4710 Please only refer to one another by your designated numbers. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4711 In my practice, I have never heard of a ménage à trois that involves bunk beds! 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4712 Can I just say at the outset that this is not your traditional multiple personality case. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4713 Groupon is really getting out of control. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4714 The good news is that Junior's schizophrenia was not inherited. The bad news is that Mom and Dad both caused it. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4715 Scientific studies have shown that this new approach to counseling is as successful as the earlier one-on-one counseling. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4716 Thank you for choosing the Pool option in Uber Therapist. Now let's start. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4717 Sibling number 1. How did that make you feel? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4718 Family plan - 3 for the price of 1. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4719 Not what I thought when he said his therapist stacked up 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4720 The doctor got this to work horizontally at Cartoon Collections. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4721 Now about your 30% discount.... 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4722 Patient B, now what were you saying about your feeling that your mother never really focused on your needs? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4723 Relax...this isn’t my first time dealing with multiple personalities 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4724 The 'fire-torpedo' function? Don't worry; that's why we have pillows across the room. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4725 This is the first session of your Agoraphobia treatment. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4726 What makes you feel like there's someone third between you? 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4727 I've called you here today to debunk your codependency theory 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4728 Now, tell me what's on your minds. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4729 Did your guys wives make you do this too? 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4730 Welcome to Separation Anxiety therapy session 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4731 We're running an Oedipus Complex special this week. 1.1053 0.04805 57 52 4 1
4732 Do you ever feel like just another number? 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4733 So one of you thinks your a submarine, while the other thinks their a sandwich, and the other thinks their a pigeon, Lets see if we can debunk this feeling! 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4734 You are up there to confront your fear of heights. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4735 It's time you pulled yourself together 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4736 I know it is hard to stop the Bern. So relax, breathe deep, and repeat after me. Trump. Trump. Trump. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4737 No, you still have to pay for three. 1.1053 0.04101 57 51 6 0
4738 “Can I get anyone a ladder? I’m about to reach up into your minds.” 1.1045 0.04324 67 61 5 1
4739 We need to stop buying subjects from the Edison line. 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4740 Gives new meaning to leveraging your time. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4741 Ready for the Speed Shrink dumb, dumber, and dumbest round? 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4742 And how long have you been obsessed with Groupon? 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4743 This is Triple Theorapy! Please give all answers in the form of a question." 1.1034 0.05326 58 54 2 2
4744 I know your flashbacks tell a different story but I'm thinking Jack and Rebecca really messed you up. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4745 Have you stopped to consider how "Tripple Coupon Day" would have made Freud feel? 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4746 You're lucky. I charge 3-for-1 to college students. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4747 Thanks for using the three-for-one Groupon. Now tell me about your self worth. Bottom bunk? 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4748 I understand your concern but the sharing economy also has many upsides. For example, shall I request an UberPool when we are done here? 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4749 One at a time, please. Let's start with how mom screwed me up. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4750 A dysfunctional family hierarchy can manifest itself in subtle, unspoken ways. 1.1034 0.05326 58 54 2 2
4751 Don't reply until I'm finished. Your insurance has the three for one hour sale until Friday. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4752 Like roommates, having shrink-mates helps you save some money. 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4753 Perhaps you should consider that things really are stacked against you. 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4754 Jimmy, we already talked about that. You can have the top couch next session" 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4755 When your psychologist's office is in a WeWork 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4756 It is quite clear to me that you are experiencing different levels of anxiety ....best I prescribe tricyclic therapy. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4757 Lucky for you, there’s a special on thrupples this month! 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4758 It seems like what you’re experiencing here is merely a classic case of middle bunk syndrome. 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4759 Edward, you were selected because you have brown hair and are slightly overweight. Not everyone can be perfect. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4760 How is this Hipaa compliant? 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4761 Yes, I'm familiar with your parents 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4762 Will the patient with the bed wetting problem please lie down on the bottom couch. 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4763 This isn't what multi personality disorder means. 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4764 Look on the bright side- at least its covered by your deductibles. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4765 Tell me more about the bar that your dads walked into.. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4766 I never liked the idea of holding group sessions, but the couch was free. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4767 You’re the worst fucking therapist 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4768 After many battles we survived the enemy, and this time we did not rest. Now we take some rest .The enemy is at the base of the head 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4769 You'll get my Millennial Package...three to a session with each of you taking a turn; first and last month in advance. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4770 Emily was unsure how to bring up her co-dependent roommates with her therapist. 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4771 No, I haven’t seen “This is Us.” 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4772 Remember, checkout is by 11AM 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4773 Well, on the positive side, your co-pay covers a session with a psychiatrist. 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4774 You three have what we call a Stacking Psychosis. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4775 I know it’s not ideal Mark but, you know what, everyone is “struggling” these days and quite frankly I just don’t have the time. 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4776 Tina, how does Tom's carpool driving make you feel? 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4777 Number three have you ever felt like life is passing you by? 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4778 Would any of you like to change places? 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4779 Jonathan, how are coping with being between relationships? 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4780 It’s called scalability and I know you’ve all heard of it. 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
4781 I understand you lost your father recently. But, in here, it's a safe space to talk. It's just us. This Is Us. 1.1034 0.04725 58 53 4 1
4782 I 'll be candid, you have mothers issues. 1.1029 0.04263 68 62 5 1
4783 All together now: ‘I’m H-A-P-P-Y, I’m H-A-P-P-Y. I know I am, I’m sure I am. I’m H-A-P-P-Y! 1.0984 0.03845 61 55 6 0
4784 Question to contestant on the top: How serious is this Fear of commitment you’ve mentioned? 1.0984 0.03845 61 57 3 1
4785 I am sorry you had to wait for your individual appointment. We have 6 minutes to share. 1.0984 0.04499 61 56 4 1
4786 I've invited you here to test my new therapy for bed wetting... 1.0980 0.04205 51 46 5 0
4787 Well this is rather dramatic, even for a cocain study 1.0968 0.04429 62 57 4 1
4788 Did you say six meals a day, Number Two? 1.0962 0.04128 52 47 5 0
4789 Who wants to be the control group today? 1.0943 0.04053 53 48 5 0
4790 Are you sure the FDA approves? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4791 Lets ignore this as an outlier and move on 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4792 Yes, this is the first X-rat! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4793 Do you think that the mouse knows he can open the window just clicking on the right? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4794 The new regime works wonders 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4795 Year of the Rat mascot tryouts reach new heights 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4796 Let’s explore when you first started fearing the death of celebrities. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4797 You one half off iscount does not allow you to pick the weekly topic. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4798 Which husband would like to go first? 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4799 But, Doctor, Norm's the most daring and generous lover I've ever encountered and Chip's intellect knows no perceivable bounds. What if our idyllic equipoise, piquant as it is to petty bourgeois taste, might just outlast the Eiffel Tower, itself? 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4800 Why yes, I did earn my degree from the Henry Ford School of Psychiatry. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4801 Don't worry, you'll all see the real meaning of transference when you get my bill. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4802 Freud had a theory that a Ménage à trois was good for you but I think it's been largely debunked. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4803 Well, it's obvious you have multiple personalities. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4804 I call it menage a trois but only one of you gets dessert. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4805 As I told your three siblings, it's natural for you to think of me as your former housekeeper, Alice ... but we have to get at the root of this obsession with your cousin Oliver. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4806 Which one of you chose this Groupon? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4807 Well, the middle child syndrome does pass from one generation to the next. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4808 You can rotate to another berth if you prefer to suffer from a trendier condition instead. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4809 The fee for my powers will be three to the power of three 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4810 Before we 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4811 I didn't expect "Person-centered Therapy" to be this literal. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4812 What did you think I meant by a three tier recovery program? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4813 Who said group therapy is bunk? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4814 So-which one of you thinks he's pregnant? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4815 Let's have sleeping therapy." -Vivian, Age 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4816 I specialize in polyamory. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4817 what do you all think of the new bunk chaise? 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4818 Guess this is the new 3 tier psychology! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4819 Our moms aren't friends...they all play tennis together. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4820 Maria, let's discuss why you feel that bunk order has made you an overachiever, maybe even a perfectionist. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4821 It may also be the fault of your biological father. 1.0926 0.05462 54 51 1 2
4822 I'm sorry, but what you three have been telling me is pure bunk. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4823 Buy 1, get 3 free. . 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4824 Patient #2, do YOU resent your mother? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4825 Yes, your therapy session is included with your time share fee. Robert E. Mayer, Warsaw, IN Rmayer4399@comcast.net 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4826 This method of therapy is wrong on every level. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4827 The adjustment from prison back to ordinary life can indeed be difficult. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4828 I'm glad you're taking advantage of the buy-one-get-two-free closure deal" 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4829 And then you all thought you were avatars of a deceased rock star. ... I see. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4830 Lucky you, this is less overbooked than usual. Now I hope you have the same concerns. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4831 Don't worry, the only thing that is rocky in this room is your relationships with one-another. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4832 Plots 54, 68, and 121. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4833 It’s time for your children to join our discussions but I’m still waiting on two more triple-deckers. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4834 I'm glad you asked! Yes, each of you will be billed the full hour. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4835 This is not what I meant when I offered a three-for-one. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4836 Let's talk about your fear of bunk beds. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4837 This is the last step of our addiction treatment! 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4838 So in your shared three bedroom, you can’t decide who cooks on Weekends? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4839 Number 2. What is your between anxiety level? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4840 I'm afraid you're a triple threat. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4841 I have a train to catch, let's make this quick. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4842 This is group therapy for people like you who haven't successfully launched as adults. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4843 Some may call it bunk, but we call it therapy for the sharing economy. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4844 Alright,who passed the gas? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4845 Why don't we begin with each of you telling me about your problems in ten words or less. We will begin with patient number one on the top bunk. then proceed down until we get to patient number 3 on the bottom bunk. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4846 Did your parents give you each a stick of dynamite for every birthday? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4847 A family that complains together, stays together 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4848 Emily, for eternity: your Dad would be on the bottom, your Mom in the middle, and you on top. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4849 Our group therapy sessions are still evolving. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4850 Landlord finally faces the reality of skyrocketing housing costs. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4851 “So we recap, you are sandwiched in your decisions!” 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4852 We call it leveled therapy! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4853 Sorry guy's,two's company but three's a crowd. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4854 I don’t know whether to talk to your Id, Ego or Superego 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4855 Even on top I feel like the middle child. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4856 Princess and the Pea x 3 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4857 No, your son will not have a sibling 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4858 Yes, but on the bright side he's been good for business. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4859 Your dissociative bunkmate disorder has risen to a new level. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4860 Okay ... which one of you wrote the paper's advice columnist and signed it 'Therapist-from-Hell Survivor 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4861 How do you feel about your father saying "I have three kids, one of each"? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4862 No Waiting 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4863 How do you feel about being in this stupid cartoon? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4864 And how does this recurring dream of overnight camp make you feel? 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4865 Which one of you just said psychiatry is bunk? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4866 Mr Jackson, I am afraid we are going to have to reschedule, there is a weight requirement to for “in between” therapy. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4867 Here at TSA post-check, we strive to minimize Post TSA Disorder, while maximizing rewards for our first class passengers... 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4868 If it makes you feel better, next week you can be on top. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4869 The first one to start crying will get $50 off their next session. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4870 All right, let's see if this helps bring your Oedipus Complex more into focus 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4871 Which story would you like to hear today? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4872 Let’s start the tri-gestalt. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4873 I can't do my job if you keep talking over each other. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4874 So, how did you feel when the comments went viral? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4875 Helen, since you are comfortable at the top, what are your feelings about Paul, who needs lots of room at the bottom? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4876 Was it really necessary for you to build this prop to demonstrate to me your middle child insecurities in this psychodrama roleplay? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4877 Let’s discuss your feeling of being on top of each other this session. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4878 There must be a very good reason you feel so resistant right now. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4879 Thanks for trying TheraPooly. John, we'll be arriving at your creative block first. _Chris and Jane, you'll find the complimentary phone chargers and water to your right. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4880 Anyone down for yoga? 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4881 Go back to that time in the navy sub. Who ate the tacos with extra hot sauce? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4882 For insurance purposes we need to consolidate psychotherapy consultations and group therapy on suicidal tendencies. You can opt out by buying life insurance. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4883 I'm sure Mr. Bezos didn't mean EVERYONE at Amazon would have to laid off! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4884 Alright everyone, breath in. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4885 Your Groupon therapy session starts...Now! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4886 Have you always felt you were particularly close to your family? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4887 I could have offered the single level sofas. It should be quite interesting discussing your propensity for drama. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4888 I don't believe what you three are experiencing can be termed 'mass hysteria'. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4889 Did we mention we have a Groupon? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4890 So, you are 2, 3 and 4 and your parents are Chinese. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4891 Make believe you're the only person in the room. Please state your name before speaking. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4892 I didn't notice this in the Groupon. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4893 I'm going to refer you to Ikea 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4894 No. I'm not half-listening, there are 3 of you here. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4895 Group analysis ensures the need for group therapy in the future. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4896 Are you comfy?” Don Dechman, Austin, T 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4897 Welcome to the Better Help storefront 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4898 I should triple charge him the hour. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4899 You must sacrifice your privacy to get the discount. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4900 Lets discuss the baby bump , an occasional menage happenstance. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4901 I feel your pain, but insurance allows only three personalities per session, Sybil. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4902 Group Rights is everyone, accordingly. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4903 YOU CONTINUE TO BLOCK THE TOP SPOTS AND EFFECTIVELY DELETE GOOD CAPTIONS OF OTHERS. ARE YOU MEAN, DISHONEST, OR JUST VERY YOUNG? YOU KNOW I CAN DO THIS TO YOU AT WILL (WALK THE PLANK). I'LL STOP IF YOU ALLOW THE CONTEST TO PROCEED FAIRLY, AS INTENDED 1.0926 0.05462 54 51 1 2
4904 Sybil, why don't you start with telling me about your relationship with your mother. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4905 You see the other ones too, right? 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4906 To upgrade to first class, please contact my secretary" 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4907 What would Freud do? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4908 Bachelor #1, how is your relationship with your mother? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4909 I’ve developed a three-tiered plan to address your fears of public speaking 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4910 What makes you think you’re adopted? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4911 That's very typical for a middle child. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4912 Okay, any of you really want to change places? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4913 So how do you feel about Medicare-for-All 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4914 Do you want separate bills? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4915 A study on the issue of “failure to launch” 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4916 Welcome. It all stems from your childhood. That'll be $200. Did I mention we don't take insurance? NEXT! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4917 I can assure you Roger, Ken and Beatrice that Multiple Personality Disorder has been thoroughly discredited, however I will be billing you separately! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4918 All of my training tells me there really is something to this Power of Three thing. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4919 when your mom wants the whole family to sit down for a conversation and everyone already knows what it is about 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4920 This isn't what I meant by trying everything. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4921 On a scale of one to three, how do each of you feel? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4922 Taking advantage of the 20% off deal on group counseling 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4923 See, relationships are like ogres. They've got layers.... 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4924 Who gett's the bill? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4925 So tell me about your Yotel trauma. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4926 Don't worry, the therapy will trickle down 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4927 Welcome to speed talking therapy. What makes you sad? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4928 I don't know, maybe it's just me, but I think the human sandwich is falling apart. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4929 This isn't what I meant when I said we would work on your multiple personalities. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4930 Lights, camera, action. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4931 Karen, 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4932 You can upgrade to Business just with one gallon of tears. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4933 Anti depressents won't help. Vote Blue no matter who. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4934 Can we get a group consensus on why # 2 pregnant? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4935 Let me guess: you're sailing to Europe on a troop ship or you're flying Business Economy on Spirit 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4936 Good question, but I think having multiple personalities is appropriate in this case. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4937 How do you feel about the level of couch you were assigned? 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4938 The Dysfunctional Family Robinson 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4939 Do you have that feeling of loneliness even when you're in a group? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4940 Have any of you folks ever heard of "Sybil"? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4941 Would you care to share your experience on that? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4942 So, why do you think my business is booming? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4943 How do you feel about threesomes? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4944 Super-ego should be on top! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4945 Client- 'Where's the ladder for this bunk-partment?' Estate Agent- 'Most people going for this can't afford to get on the ladder, so there is no need for one.' 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4946 I'm trying to squeeze everyone in before my vacation next week. Mary, you won the coin toss, so why don't you start. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4947 Now, which one of you actually purchased the GroupOn? 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4948 OK Nick, let’s talk more about your feelings toward your overbearing, oppressive parents. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4949 Tell me a little more about this “crowd”. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4950 We'll start at the top, crap runs down hill. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4951 As you know the real estate prices in NYC have tripled. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4952 Y'all can relax now. The buggerman is in jail. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4953 I am hired by condo board to assist in their evaluation, and here to listen. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4954 I can understand that you are used to it, but even if your problems are intertwined: THIS IS NOT YOUR COLLEGE DORM! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4955 Yes, you're right. That's exactly what I meant by 'cheaper by the dozen' 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4956 I think your issues are beginning to stack up. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4957 Lisa, if you're going to move on, it's important to put your past beneath you. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4958 Bachelor Number One, tell me about your relationship with your mother. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4959 I thought this might cut down on those awkward pauses. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4960 Talk sale 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4961 Is it really worth fighting over who gets to play the Suzanne Somers role? 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4962 Well new schools need new curriculum but with same principle 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4963 Okay, after 17 tries, if everyone satisfied with your positions, we can begin. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4964 The Groupon only covers one person talking at a time 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4965 Congratulations. You are the first cohort in psychotherapy while taking the bus to Boston. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4966 The group session evaluates you for type A worthiness 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4967 First of all you have to stop watching “This Is Us” 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4968 I told you my degree is in engineering comfort. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4969 What upsets you most about Groupon? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4970 I used to think group therapy was a lot of bunk, but Dr Aloft has really taken it to new heights. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4971 Sorry, but things are much tighter under Obama Care 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4972 Why was the ménage à trois important to you? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4973 The Groupon said "3 visits," not a visit for 3. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4974 This is an excellent way to practice Mindfulness! 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4975 Remember, even though you have different mothers and different problems, to qualify for the discount rate the same interpretation applies to you three. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4976 I hear you - I was directionless, too. Then one day, working a summer job at IHOP, it just came clear to me. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4977 Ok Which one of you three bodies of Eve/Evan wants to go first? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4978 One of you ate my lunch and I'm waiting for you to cough up! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4979 I know it isn't perfect, but I am the only thruples counseller in town. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4980 Let's begin your couples therapy with a warm welcome to my budget client, Raymond. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4981 So sorry, but changes in medical insurance coverage provide for group therapy sessions only. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4982 It's your mom, now please clear out for my 11:46es. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4983 I see you are all here for group therapy 1.0926 0.05462 54 51 1 2
4984 Good news friends, a ladder is on order.. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4985 Tell me more about your recent Japan Airlines flight . 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4986 We're not going to get anywhere until we stop fighting over who gets the top bunk. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4987 Maybe you should tell me what you think your dream means. 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4988 You're carrying three faces of Eve overboard. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4989 My motives, once were exterior are now horribly exposed. I desperately need something to cover them up again. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4990 Wait,John,just want to make sure. You just said your boyfriend dated your sister? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4991 So number 2, when did you start feeling the sandwich child syndrome? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4992 As I understand it, what has led you three to seek treatment began at sleep-away camp... 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4993 So when did you start feeling like you're just a commodity? 1.0926 0.04779 54 50 3 1
4994 And why does it remind you of fetish furniture? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4995 We'll go in alphabetical order 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4996 So which one of you had the inadequate father figure again? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4997 I treat dependency in multiples, not fractions. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4998 I'm sorry about the bunk beds, it's just that now I have so much more space in this room to do activities. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
4999 So am I getting this right? All three of you fainted when you heard the Friends’ Reunion is confirmed? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5000 Okay, 'Do, re, mi...' from the top! 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5001 Why does he always get the biggest room? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5002 Should I eat you individually? Or all at once like a triple decker cheeseburger. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5003 To be clear before we begin, your three-for-one discount excludes multiple personality disorders. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5004 My Groupon needs revision 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5005 The two other voices in your head--do you hear them right now, Sally? 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5006 Each of you will get its turn. Think of it as time-share with your multiple personalities 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5007 I call it Club Sandwich therapy. Upper bunk, I’m listening. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5008 For the last time Fran, if you want to talk about that, don’t use a Groupon. 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5009 You're all still getting charged my full rate... 1.0926 0.03982 54 49 5 0
5010 Psychologically unstable bachelor number 3. You want to go out on the town in your clown costume but cant find your nose. Do you "A" stay in and cuddle up for movie night or "B" ditch the nose, salvage the night and go out as a mime. 1.0921 0.03339 76 69 7 0
5011 At least we won’t have: to clean the maze 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5012 Interesting... It appears the subject has skipped past legal weed and gone straight to jetpacks. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5013 The dairy-free vegan soy cheese doesn’t seem to be having the same effect... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5014 Wrong hands? at 1f this gets into the cage 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5015 We thought this was an easy task, but it turns out it is rocket science. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5016 They said this project would never take off 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5017 I think research is going to have to look at a new mousetrap 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5018 What do you mean Stuart Little is a fiction 7? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5019 Maybe we should try self- driving car? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5020 that puppy REALLYmoves. for the last time, Jim, it’s a mouse 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5021 That rat is high off his medication 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5022 Yeah, but his taste in food is garbage. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5023 I think we have rats in our little jetpack labyrinth... 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5024 I'm pretty sure you're over the weight limit for the middle bunk." 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5025 Now, how did that meme make you feel?" 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5026 Welcome to "Therapy Pool" in which you will be able to split the cost of your therapy with strangers who are headed in a similar direction as you. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5027 Tell me why you feel that no one values you as an individual. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5028 The Couch-share option offsets the surge pricing. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5029 For our final question today we’ll deal with your patterns of failed relationships. Patients, here’s your clue... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5030 How's everyone feeling about that family bed now? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5031 Family therapist starts off on the wrong foot by not giving the boy the top couch. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5032 It is abundantly clear that my normal methods are not well suited to this situation, let me try something new. Alexa, play ‘Bizarre Love Triangle’ by New Order. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5033 Paying attention to your breathing,yo may feel your inner child speaking to you. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5034 This is what happens with triplets 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5035 Again, I emphasize that there’s no social stratification—no pecking order, no levels—in my designated-station therapy among the three of you siblings. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5036 It’s all your moms’ fault. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5037 We left it to Beaver 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5038 If you three are appearing as a singing trio, it's going to sound odd if she sings bass. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5039 Let me begin by analyzing you three from top to bottom. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5040 So, you’re despondent over the breakup of Snap, Crackle and Pop? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5041 Who's idea was the Menage a trois ? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5042 No, Sharon, you are the Super Ego. Danny gets to be the Id this time. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5043 It's designed for group therapy sessions. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5044 Sorry no, there was a typo on the website..this conference is not about CB’D’... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5045 I’ll be the judge of whether three-for-one coupons are crazy. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5046 Trust me, Mom's a therapist and I know we can work this out. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5047 It's Three-Fer Thursday Therapy. If you all blather at once, I can leave early and be three sheets to the wind by three. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5048 I want you to know that I've taken group therapy to a new level. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5049 Karen, I thought we agreed this week Geoff could move up one and be one top! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5050 So, back to self-esteem. Number 2 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5051 And how does it make you feel that your parents are only willing to pay one-third of your therapy bills? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5052 Hey Big Belly, your 15 minutes is up. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5053 First of all, I suggest we talk about competition 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5054 Top: Baby Boomer Middle: Generation X Bottom: Millennial 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5055 How long has each of you had the feeling that you were a bear? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5056 So that'll be $3,000 each sans utilities. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5057 Before we begin I'd like to thank you for taking advantage of our Groupon special. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5058 Remind me - which of you is Wynken, Blynken, or Nod? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5059 I’ll tell you the same thing I tell all my reverse polyamorous couples— communication is key. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5060 Let's set the ground rules of group therapy for acrophobia. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5061 I tend to really delve into the different levels of your consciousness 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5062 And may I ask which level of Freud’s Topographical Model - your conscious, preconscious, or unconscious - has been appointed to pay for today's session? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5063 Welcome to Groupon therapy, I'm Dr. Pat. Jeffrey, tell us, how does discount sushi make you feel? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5064 I don't take insurance, but you can split the bill in the app. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5065 I see an Oedipal pattern here. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5066 Face it Kate and Kevin, Randall is everyone’s favorite. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5067 If you have any questions, just your hand. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5068 The hourly family discount is not going to be beneficial or effective with a “yes,” “no” and “maybe.” 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5069 And how does your super-ego feel about it? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5070 When did you first experience this anxiety over your mental-health insurance coverage? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5071 You’ve selected the song, ‘Mean’. From the top, mom ... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5072 fff 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5073 Sorry folks. I don't offer a group discount for multiple personality disorder. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5074 Now remember: next week Mary gets to be the id, Mark the ego and Steve the superego. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5075 Therapy only works if you are willing to share. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5076 Based on these statements, Levels 1 and 3 flip. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5077 Mental health delivery under medicare for all 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5078 So you're concerned about your new health insurance plan. Let's explore that. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5079 Who wants to discuss what you're dreaming of now? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5080 How long is this 3 for 1 deal going to last... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5081 Before we get to your feelings of redundancy, let’s talk about the myth of white male privilege. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5082 Which of you thinks it’s all your mother’s fault? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5083 I have to admit. Your my first triple personality. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5084 With all due respect, Dr., I come here so you can help me solve my problems not pile them on. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5085 Let's begin with your priorities. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5086 You don't think you are triplets? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5087 To tell the truth, I'm Kim Kardashian..." "To tell the truth, I'm Kim Kardashian..." "To tell the truth, I'm Kim Kardashian... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5088 I will now open this session to those coping with childhood and family-related traumas... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5089 it all strted at camp, 3rd grade 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5090 This week we will visit about traumas affecting the oldest, middle and youngest child. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5091 Alright, could the rest of you tune out, please, while I speak to the id? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5092 . . . another triple header. 1.0784 0.03802 51 46 4 0
5093 First, let me say I understand your confusion. (your SIBLING confusion?) 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5094 OK, which one of you is jusr tired? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5095 I'm sorry you disagree, but the terms of your group insurance plans require that I give all three of you the same diagnosis." 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5096 If I'm hearing you correctly, what you're saying is a lot of bunk. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5097 So far, all I’m hearing is a lot of bunk. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5098 On the plus side, I’ve reduced my fees 50%. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5099 Think of it as a shared Uber session. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5100 It was in the fine print of your Groupon 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5101 We're considering an additional charge for advance row assignment. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5102 Let's get started with a roll call. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5103 Sorry, three's a crowd 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5104 Exoneration PTSD 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5105 Okay then. So, are any of you familiar with 'Rashomon'? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5106 I hope, Miss Jones, that you'll find it therapeutic that you came out on top for a change! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5107 So, your anxiety began when you went to summer camp? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5108 This is classic middle bunk syndrome. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5109 Your triple entendre is much ado about nothing. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5110 Now which one of you said you suffer from middle child syndrome? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5111 So out of all your siblings only you three want Brad to come home to Angelina. 1.0784 0.03802 51 46 4 0
5112 Now forget about the other two and tell me about your severe social anxiety 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5113 I don’t think it’s a simple case of middle child syndrome! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5114 How does that make you feel? Mary, you go first. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5115 Daisy, are you always on top? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5116 Again it’s a Groupon session so please apply best you can to your own situation. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5117 Whose bright idea was this? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5118 It seems you've all signed up for the new 3-in-1 insurance plan. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5119 Your biggest problem is that you are not as special as you think you are, hence the three-for-one deal. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5120 This new analysis method works on one-third of patients 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5121 It's called "horizontal group, with internet deprivation". You also get to rest a little. It's what your insurance plan will cover. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5122 Now that you're all here, who wants be begin ? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5123 Let's talk about your family. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5124 Now Margie, you know you weren't supposed to reveal Ted's social security number in open session. 1.0784 0.03802 51 46 4 0
5125 Trust me. It's the best way to prepare only children for college." 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5126 I'll redeem your Groupon at the end of the session. But first, let's get in touch with your inner child(ren). 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5127 When did you first realize you were identical triplets ? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5128 If you could switch places with either of the other two, whom would you pick, and why? Best answer gets a free session. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5129 There are just some things that you can’t use a Groupon for... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5130 Definitely the oddest non-identical triplets I’ve ever seen. But that aside, let’s start therapy from the bottom up. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5131 We have multiple personality disorder, so we can treat each of you at a third the usual rate. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5132 'The cut backs in your insurance are draconian, we must do best we can. Go, we have 44 minutes." 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5133 Okay, one of you ate my pet python. Who did it? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5134 it not surprising your choice of a male surrogate to carry your child would lead to these levels of angst. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5135 So did you all decide at the same time that a triad wasn't working for you? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5136 Sally realised it was the concept of small houses that appealed 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5137 I thought this was supposed to be a one-on-one session. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5138 So which one of you was the "third"? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5139 When you three can come to a consensus. let me know. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5140 Luckily, you all agreed to Medicare’s new regulation and we can continue with your counseling. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5141 What a great deal, therapy for three and pay for one. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5142 So Daniel, how does it feel to always get stuck on the bottom couch. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5143 The family that councils together stays together 1.0784 0.03802 51 46 4 0
5144 New frontiers in psychiatric productivity! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5145 Why do you think you have multiple personalities? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5146 So you think your obsession with special discount offers might be a problem . . . 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5147 Normally, Multiple Personality Disorder is controllable. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5148 Arguing over 'who's on top' is getting you nowhere. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5149 I studied with Harry Stack Sullivan. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5150 Anyone, how do you really feel about your foster mother? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5151 It is designed to cure acrophobia. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5152 Cot No 1, on a scale of one to ten, how upset are you for not being in either cot No. 2 or Cot No. 3? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5153 It's our latest design in Coronavirus quarantine accommodations! What do you think? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5154 Welcome to therapy. Can you please tell us about them? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5155 In light of the success of Uberpool, we are now offering Therapool. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5156 Though for different reasons, you all feel the deck is stacked against you." 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5157 But look at it this way: You're each getting a 2/3 discount. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5158 Have you considered trying OxyContin? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5159 Is it too late to mention that I have a fear of heights? 1.0784 0.03802 51 46 4 0
5160 And when do you first remember using Groupon? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5161 Before we start, I assume that you read the privacy policy before you clicked 'I Agree'? 1.0784 0.03802 51 46 4 0
5162 Voldemort must've gotten to them too. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5163 Believe me, if I could afford quadruple bunk beds, I wouldn't be sitting here. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5164 For your therapy session today, let's try a 3 tiered approach! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5165 Sounds like your trauma stems from your mother. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5166 Jessica, dropping SBDs is passive-aggressive behavior, and is NOT an appropriate response to being bunk-couched. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5167 I just don’t think you guys are seeing eye to eye. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5168 I need the extra money to raise the ceiling in my kitchen. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5169 Therapy-share in the gig economy: “Nancy, it says you pay and arrive on time, let’s start with you.” 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5170 What don’t you like about our new healthcare system? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5171 Don't worry, I'm a psychologist with multiple personalities 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5172 To start, please relate your current self-image to which bunk you chose.” William Hunter, Plymouth M 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5173 Well,You said you could not afford individual therapy 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5174 Maggie, you say it smells up there, how does that make you feel? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5175 The "CoronaVirus" has our family very concerned. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5176 Usually, a three-way goes horizontally not vertically. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5177 I think we should organise a get together with my inner demons, Sarah’s closeted skeletons and Linda’s ghosts of the past. They seem like they would get on. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5178 I'm still charging triple fees for this, you know. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5179 Welcome to thera-pool! Let me know if any of you needs a bottle of water or a phone charger. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5180 Executing Bernie Sander's Medicare plan 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5181 I’m happy to give this a try, but could you please not do the primal scream at the same time? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5182 Now, allow me to debunk some of your anxieties 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5183 It's probably just your garden-variety inferiority complex, but let's hold off on a firm diagnosis until we see how you stack up. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5184 If you want the group rate to work, you’re going to have to speak one at a time. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5185 My new couch for these family sessions is working well. Can all of you agree on that? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5186 First, I think we need to address boundaries... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5187 School counseling sessions were underwritten by IKEA. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5188 Number Two, Hands over the stomach. Assume the position. When you don't assume you'll only make an ass out of yourself, not out of me. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5189 *sighs* I always tell my clients to steer clear of throuples. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5190 So Groupon is not a new method of Groupon therapy? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5191 I think that this throuple thing is getting out of hand. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5192 That's all the time we have for today, [insert name here], I hope you reached some real clarity during your discounted TheraPass session today 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5193 Charles, let's get back to your trust issues. If you had a Split Personality Disorder I would have diagnosed it long ago." 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5194 The "group discount" only applies when you speak in unison. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5195 So tell me about your time on This is Us 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5196 So tell me when you first felt things were stacking up against you. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5197 So are you really multiple personalities or just looking for group rates? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5198 We will not be talking about who gets the top bunk. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5199 So tell me about Summer Camp ... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5200 I'm sorry to break it you but the two's company, three's a crowd rate ends next month. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5201 No Sybil, I wouldn’t say it’s all just typical middle-child stuff. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5202 The weirdest "This Is Us" episode. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5203 Well, Ralph, had Wilson, and Gunnar known you were a bedwetter, they probably wouldn't have let you have the top bunk. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5204 Ok team, who wants go first! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5205 So let's talk about that. How do each of you feel when someone stacks you up to one another? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5206 Sorry but I really needed to get my productivity numbers up. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5207 Buy one, get 2 sessions free" is working for me. Freely associate your thoughts 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5208 How does it make you feel that the rent is too damn high? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5209 Isn't it empowering to know you're not alone with this problem? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5210 We have limited time here on the group plan so please don’t give me any bunk! 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5211 I’m sorry, but to make ends meet I have to see three clients per session. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5212 You’re my first throuple. Should I split the fee evenly three ways? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5213 OK, tell me why you hate your siblings. You go first, #1. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5214 Pre-Election Special - Now Offering 3-fers. Don't Wait, Spaces Limited, Reservations Required - First Come, First Saved! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5215 Here’s your first tossup question. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5216 I think sliding scale would have been better than overbooking 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5217 And number two, why do YOU hate your mother? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5218 How do you feel about being conspicuous in the middle? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5219 It's "bunking" group therapy, not "DE-bunking group therapy" 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5220 Congratulations, out next session will be sitting in a circle 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5221 I'm sorry Groupon messed up, It's 3 visits for 1 person. . 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5222 A few rules, in group therapy, we change couches only every other session 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5223 As triplets, who feels the most alienated? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5224 So. Top or bottom? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5225 Welcome to my new Three-Tier therapy program- ladder not included 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5226 Political Brainwashing “Where two or three are gathered” 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5227 Yes, our production has increased since the renovation. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5228 Millennials, so what seems to be your problem? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5229 I'm not quite sure she knows what "Group Counseling" really is? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5230 As you work through your fear of heights, you will eventually be rewarded the bottom bunk! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5231 So, how’s the fretted up there ? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5232 Show of hands: Who is here because they don't feel their voice is being heard in their personal relationships? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5233 It's my way of making family therapy less uncomfortable. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5234 Hello Lisa, Marcus and James, I'm Dr.Garbo. So what brings you to throuples counseling? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5235 Well we’re calling it the Triple Treat! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5236 It's been this way since 2016 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5237 Whew, we're finally settled. Now tell me about your guys's mother, and quickly. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5238 If Freud can be debunked we can feel optimistic about your prognosis. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5239 This person keeps following me" "This person keeps following me" "This person keeps following me 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5240 Okay, who put a pushpin on my chair? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5241 So what brought you to thrupples therapy?” 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5242 What part of your family dynamics makes it feel like you are leading parallel lives? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5243 Were you ever told that therapy was bunk? It’s true! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5244 Which one of you is here about their fear of heights again? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5245 If you think you've got problems, IKEA shipped this to me without assembly instructions. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5246 So your family counseling plan allows for up to sixteen visits, at the end of which you can expect to find your order and position of dominance completely shifted 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5247 I call bottom bunk due to my crippling anxiety!! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5248 So, which of you is the bed-wetter? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5249 So tell me again what happened last year at band camp? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5250 Multitasking.... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5251 You're doing well, the alarm didn't go off for methane. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5252 OK! Next week Jimmy has the top bunk. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5253 Kindly decide which level suits you best. But do keep in mind that our rules specify only one occupant per berth. No exceptions, please. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5254 What's coming between you? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5255 It’s clear that you all identify as brothers from another mother. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5256 You know I still have to bill you all separately. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5257 Your in luck, today’s special is three for the price of two. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5258 Okay Folks, this is what's called Group Therapy. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5259 It’s only $100 per session each, what did you expect? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5260 Before I collapse the couch, are you more afraid of heights, being crushed, or middle child syndrome? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5261 This theory needs to be debunked. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5262 I understand that you all have the same sperm donor. What I don't understand is your mother issues. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5263 Where would you say you rank in your family? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5264 Jan,why don't you go first - then Peter and Bobby can tell us how they feel about Cindy's freakishly blue eyes. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5265 Now tell me more about your anxiety around the world becoming hyper-efficient and not being able to keep up. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5266 These sessions are supposed to help with codependency. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5267 Any of you been to discount therapy yet? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5268 How's everyone's dominance hierachy treating them today? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5269 So I see that Karen got the top bunk - how does that make you feel? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5270 Yes. It's a common problem. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5271 I think I may have made a mistake agreeing to a Groupon promotion for my practice. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5272 Finally, I will be scoring your insights and that will determine couch positions for the next session. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5273 Oh shit it's a 3 bedded monster lol get it hahaha god I'm funny; anyway, you 3 are sick, sick fucks 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5274 Which of you DON'T feel like your parents put you on a pedestal? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5275 Debunking you're psychosis is the first step towards recovery." 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5276 So summing up those journeys in the train bunk could represent the beginning of the trauma ...? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5277 So who's using a Groupon today? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5278 You say therapist I say teacher.. why? Well, ur learnin ain't you?? About yourselves *big smirk* 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5279 So Harold, tell us about your issues with boundaries in the family hierarchy. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5280 Let's start our family sale with the bed-wetting mom." 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5281 Tell me about your Groupon addiction. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5282 It's only for today. My 2 o'clock got triple-booked. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5283 I guarantee all my clients will reach a higher state of consciousness. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5284 You have depression. Who is next? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5285 MEDICARE FOR ALL" three 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5286 So, tell me, how's the three for one special working for ya? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5287 Each of you - Tell me your feelings. But hurry, your hour is almost up. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5288 I'm sensing a strong superiority complex. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5289 Group therapy only works if you let it. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5290 So, let me get this right, Stephen: you are worried that Bernie Sander's Health Care Plan doesn't cover split personalities? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5291 Economies of Scale 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5292 I'm sorry, but this is all your insurance will cover. Now, anyone raise your hand if you feel you were never understood by your mother. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5293 Remember Steve, doctor patient confidentiality does not apply to Groupons. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5294 How does it make you feel to know that your incompetent parents can only afford one-third of my fee? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5295 Deciding who will be in couple‘s counseling will have to be agreed on by the three of you. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5296 We only had room for two of your multiple personalities today. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5297 Since your parents are all psychologists, you all get a discounted rate — one-third off . 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5298 which one of you arseholes dropped their guts? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5299 How does that make you (pl.) feel? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5300 Would you prefer bottom-up or top-down processing psychology? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5301 Please choose from this multiple choice.. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5302 The rent has gone up a bit. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5303 It's from IKEA, so it must be good. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5304 Patient number three, if we were both dogs, where would you sniff me? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5305 Yes, well, you all have your ups and downs. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5306 No. Nothing less than a thousand a month. That's it. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5307 It’s all relative! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5308 It's not as intimate as a chair circle, but put a quarter in the slot and it'll massage your ego. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5309 I’m going to see who has the best dream” 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5310 Of course you all have an hour of my time. Ready? .... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5311 What do you really mean by ‘he’s always stealing my yogurt.’?” 1.0784 0.03802 51 46 3 0
5312 No problem! I am used to tier patients. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5313 First you all have to decide, Top Down or Bottoms Up 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5314 Lets start by introducing each other, group therapy is all about the right amount of mingling! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5315 Normally, the polls would have winnowed this down further by now... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5316 Yes, It's similar to telephone, until someone cries. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5317 This was clearly stated in the Groupon Terms and Conditions 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5318 I think the idea in a throuple is that you share a bed. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5319 $3000 per hour! Thank God you millennials are all alike. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5320 Group therapy deluxe. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5321 Normally, I only see patients with dual personalities! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5322 Threesomes often lead to trouble. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5323 One of my personalities will be speaking with each of you individually. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5324 I'm sorry you are offended by Brad's comment, dear. But present company is excluded. per agreement, and it's just not your turn. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5325 I'd like to hear more about this story of a lovely lady. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5326 No cell phone privileges until I find out who ate Dad’s Birthday cake. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5327 Would you say the privilege has been balanced? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5328 I just don't see why I always have to be on the bottom. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5329 Now, de-compartmentalize. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5330 Be sure to give me 5 stars on the Share-A-Shrink app.” 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5331 Sounds like the root of the problem is your father. I don’t know. What do you guys think? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5332 So you all feel the same? You say that when this 'reader' fellow looks away you cease existing? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5333 My Practice Manager said I have to see more patients per hour. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5334 Tell me why it is you feel you don't have any space of your own. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5335 The bad news is that Medicare for all necessitates a few minor adjustments in service. The good news is that dissenting voices are being suppressed so you will be sharing the same politically correct intrusive thoughts and treatment regimine. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5336 I'm afraid you have Multiple Persons Disorder. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5337 Who says women can't multitask! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5338 Okay, I understand you’re going for a trifecta- but just tell me who’s first, second and third- and I’ll place our bet! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5339 I appreciate that you invited your dormmates to our session today, Steve. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5340 So, you're not "fulfilled" with your role in the "sharing" economy? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5341 Brad, how did it make you feel when Alice didn't restock the printer? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5342 SALEWQ! Three for the price of one. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5343 Welcome to Costco's talk therapy service. Please enjoy some samples on your way out. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5344 I'm beginning to think the Groupon was not a great idea. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5345 Mothers, Schmothers... All the same! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5346 You should have mentioned you’re afraid of heights. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5347 Until I can afford a bigger office, this is the best arrangement I have for group therapy. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5348 So, your entire life feels like a balancing act? Tell me more about that. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5349 So, have the feelings flocked away or we need a stronger prescription? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5350 So let's see. You on the top feel the need to always be above everyone else. You on the bottom suffer from low feelings of inadequacy. And you in the middle are just plain tired of always having to settle for second best 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5351 I'm still charging each of you bu the hour... 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5352 I find this seating arrangement works best for throuples 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5353 Obviously only one of you has the superior view 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5354 Clearly, your parents are to blame. This prescription will help reduce your separation anxiety and recurrent bed-wetting trauma. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5355 Why bunk therapy doesn’t work. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5356 I read about this new loneliness-aversion technique last week. How does it make you all feel? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5357 I only have three rules for family therapy. Respect each other’s opinions for what they are. Challenge ideas and not individuals. Lastly, please do not kick people off the bunk above you. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5358 Let's face it guys, an hour session divided 3 ways is a good rate, but next week let's bring Moe too.... an hour rate divided 4 ways is even better 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5359 Can I start you off with something to drink? Or perhaps a painful childhood memory to share? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5360 Psych Pool or Couch Pool, I haven't decided, thank you for asking. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5361 My name is Dr. IKEA, I will only take your case if you follow my instructions. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5362 Universal Healthcare 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5363 The secret to a successful thruple is having the right furniture. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5364 You three have a sexual problem you'd like to discuss? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5365 In this group therapy, we'll reflect on our childhoods like at summer camp. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5366 As a threesome I would recommend Masters and Johnson. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5367 What brings you to throuples' counseling. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5368 Now, before we start, who first came up with the idea of the threesome? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5369 I think your problem is deeper than multiple personality. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5370 There's a sexual connotation here but I'm missing it 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5371 Correct me if I've misread the body language, but the three of you seem to have come down with a mild case of torso discomfort. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5372 Welcome everyone to your first group therapy session. OK, now whose the one whose here to help deal with his chronic bed wetting problem? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5373 It's always the mother. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5374 Um, the three-for-the-price-of-one deal was supposed to be for separate sessions. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5375 So, your three-some doesn't seem to be working? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5376 So, which one of you has the fear of heights? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5377 Today’s my three-for-one special. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5378 It's the latest in group therapy." 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5379 You can upgrade to our Elite status for extra head room and less baggage. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5380 Welcome to Therapy Camp. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5381 You Know...You could have kicked your shoes off. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5382 Clearly Charles, you're a sociopath. Wait, are you Charles? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5383 You're all here because your employer or family is concerned about your excessive multitasking. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5384 ...and it was only after seeing ''This Is Us' that you first realized you were not identical triplets? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5385 Carol, please refer back to our last meeting’s minutes and tell us whose turn it is to dom the fourgy this week. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5386 Given the state of political affairs, I had to increase my advisory capacity. You'll understand. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5387 Man I'm losing on this 3 for 1 deal. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5388 This economy session won’t help anyone, Stan, if you give that sort of response! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5389 I am raising my rates over the next three months. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5390 and this example is the modern liberal hierarchy. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5391 OK - top memories; middle dreams; bottom reflections - begin. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5392 I am prescribing recyclables to ease the pain 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5393 So Francine, now that you have the top bunk, how do you feel about your mother? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5394 Can one of you think of a dumb play on words? Freud thought shat even unfunny jokes were significant. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5395 This tells me a lot about your family hierarchy. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5396 Keep repeating, 'my place in the hierarchy is only a state of mind'" 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5397 This is the discount therapy session so answer when I call your name 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5398 During our next session, I'll make some suggestions for how to better address your separation anxiety. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5399 This is no-frills counseling for people who haven't got paradigms to rub together. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5400 So you're saying that you've lost your sense of individuality? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5401 Any feelings about the new medical insurance rules? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5402 Happily, your insurance mental health benefits align well with my belief in my skills as a multitasker, so let's get started. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5403 And how did that make you feel? What about you? And you? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5404 The Sophisticated Know this analyst is in trouble 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5405 There were three in the bed,and the little one said,... 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5406 As a kind reminder, please keep in touch with one another for our next bunk bed session. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5407 There is no such thing as hysteria it is merely a family dynamic 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5408 Yes, this is group rate family counseling. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5409 Raise your hand if they kept talking about The Little Engine That Could . . . 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5410 You all seem stuck in a "This Is Us" flashback! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5411 3 For The Price Of One ... Must Be On The Same Page Though 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5412 Unabashed Insurance Fraud 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5413 The Inigo Girls thought it was a good idea! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5414 When the music stops again, I’ll remove another couch. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5415 Affordable mental health care USA 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5416 This is the last time I advertise anything about a "group rate." 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5417 Does the group rate mean we go there together or 20 minutes each? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5418 Social Media Counseling - Can't you all get along! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5419 good morning! Group therapy is now in session 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5420 Who first suggested a tiered menage et trois? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5421 I'd like you to reflect on why you feel you don't have the best bunk. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5422 Patient number two, how would you feel about having sex on a first date with your therapist? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5423 I decided to embrace the fact that my therapy is bunk. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5424 I just can’t help feeling beneath everyone. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5425 After I eliminated my own symptoms, I felt uniquely qualified to become an OCD counselor." 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5426 Not hard to figure out that the monotony of one’s life is cause for melancholy. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5427 Quit complaining, Karen. You asked me for a session on sale. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5428 Joni, Johnie, Jimi, I think we have to take the diagnosis of multiple personality disorder to a whole new level. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5429 What makes you say the odds of success are stacked against you. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5430 It appears that you're all facing the old lower price per hour vs personal privacy dilemma. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5431 You see, polyamory is a very layered relationship dynamic. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5432 The family coverage plan can lead to confusion. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5433 Now, everyone, give me your cutrate answer. 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5434 No, it's not because your therapy is state subsidized, now who needs a subscription? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5435 Your school principal's referral means he thinks you are having problems adjusting to our public schools. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5436 Id and Superego can either of you see how your actions are putting Ego in the middle? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5437 No simple questions, No discount! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5438 I know this may be a strange approach to overcoming your fear of height but, trust me, it works! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5439 Medicare for three... 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5440 The question was actually for Jason, but that’s definitely something we’re gonna need to circle back to. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5441 CBT - Cot Bed Therapy 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5442 Raise your hand if you're having mother issues. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5443 That's a lot of bunk if I've ever heard it. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5444 Millenials do therapy in bulk. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5445 Please tell me more about this feeling of strangers on a cruise ship. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5446 Doctor: "you should have seen the look on my husbands face when I told him my two o'clock was going to be my first threesome. Doctor: "Are you kidding? I've had plenty of threesomes." 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5447 And this is your usual hierarchy? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5448 Okay, Debbie, you're first. What was your childhood like? 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5449 So you’re here because you think you have different personalities? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5450 I'm sorry the BOGO coupon applies to one personality-disorder per personality!" 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5451 It's okay, Freddie. The Tetherball Strangler isn't going to come in here. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5452 I am a psychoanalysis vendor 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5453 First, let me say I appreciate your responding to my Groupon ad. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5454 So you say you're using a shared therapy app? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5455 Does someone want to speak for the group? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5456 And Michael, how did it make you feel when Ted left his dishes in the sink again? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5457 Therapist: So which one you boys set your house on fire? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5458 So tell how do you guys end stuck together 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5459 Reaching the top is not an easy climb. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5460 So, what makes you feel like people don't see you as special? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5461 I can't cure anyone's insomnia until the three of you fall asleep. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5462 So, you are all having issues with the canoeing. Perhaps you would be more comfortable with arts and crafts? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5463 I do hope you'll feel good about this time together because it's making me filthy rich. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5464 This next question is for contestant #2. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5465 I told you to go before we got started! 1.0784 0.04722 51 48 2 1
5466 Whatever you do, don't fall. I'd get the blame, even though, technically, yes, I did choose to put you up there. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5467 From their facial expressions i. Wonder if they think you are a real king or an adult that never stopped being s child! 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5468 When did this crowded anxiety begin? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5469 This is highly irregular to have a three-way client session. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5470 So who of you is afraid of heights the most? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5471 I am going to come out with the usual lot of old garbage. Put your hand up if any of it applies to you. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5472 Modern problems require modern solutions. 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5473 And now our Fantasy Round. Patient Number One: If you could have a different disorder, which would you choose? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5474 Which of you admits to being the I’d? 1.0784 0.03802 51 47 4 0
5475 Tic-Toc-Dough, it’s three fees in a row. 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5476 As you can see, I'm not a big fan of conventional group therapy. 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5477 Democrats are now in session. 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5478 I also promised "board". 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5479 Trust me, three for one price therapy saves me time and you money. 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5480 Maybe I should rethink Groupon advertising. 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5481 I hope you realize this is not considered group therapy, and with three different psychics to sort out, it is going to take a long time. 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5482 Thanks so much for choosing me as your shrink. I know you have a choice among shrinks, and I appreciate your choosing me. I'll be taking early retirement tomorrow. Good luck! 1.0769 0.04633 52 49 2 1
5483 So when you say things like, 'Daddy made Blackbeard look like St. Francis', what exactly do you mean? 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5484 This three-for-one deal isn’t working for me. 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5485 Now this is what I meant by, "A Reverse Oreo." 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5486 From top to bottom and your problem is? 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5487 Auditioning the Mod Squad: One White, One Black, One Blonde. 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5488 Firstly, I want to commend you all on taking your places without a ladder. 1.0769 0.04633 52 49 2 1
5489 Sorry. I guess I wasn't clear when I told you you'd be coming for a threesome. 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5490 three for the money 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5491 First off, a menange a trois is generally not considered a mental psychotic behavior. 1.0769 0.03731 52 48 4 0
5492 That must be some good cheese. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5493 Should i start the IGtv video now? 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5494 I told you pigeons like cheese. 1.0625 0.04619 48 46 1 1
5495 It will be in all of your next bills so just relax 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5496 So, Janie, to be clear, the leak started in your apartment? 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5497 Could we please return to the subject of who pays the extra cent in the split of the bill? 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5498 Which one would you like to date, ma'am 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5499 I've come to inform you that our company is considering your proposal for a new Oreo cookie." 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5500 Hmmm, a runaway train of thoughts. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5501 So let me guess, you found out where babies come from. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5502 No need to worry, Bernie’s plan covers everyone 1.0625 0.04619 48 46 1 1
5503 Sorry guys. I've to meet three people at a time, so many PhDs coming in these days. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5504 Ralph, how does it make you feel when your roommates don't do their dishes? Miriam Salzer, Pacifica, CA 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5505 Next Please, your 20 minutes are up. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5506 Top: “Well let me tell you..” Middle: “So it started when..” Bottom: “Polygamist therapy has never been easy” 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5507 Mom, dad, Jonny hears you, but would like to continue to ignore you. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5508 Before we begin, I call dibs on the top bunk next session! 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5509 Our times up for this week. I hope everyone found that as productive as I did. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5510 And now tell me about HIS father. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5511 Come to think of it, I really should speak to a doctor about my concentration issues. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5512 This week Meredith gets to be the Super-ego, Sheldon you’re the ego, and you, Bruce, are the Id. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5513 Being a middle child has always left me sick of having to share ...... 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5514 On the count of 3 everyone change couches. This is to test your level of idiocy. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5515 Tom, if you don't shut up I'm going to demote you down to Id level. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5516 One at a time now -- tell me about your claustrophobia. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5517 Okay, Now that you're in the bunks let's resolve your funks 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5518 I hope all of you understand that triple therapy does not mean that each one of you pay a third of my regular rate, the rates remain the same. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5519 Ok group, remember bottom bunk represents id, middle ego, and top superego. Be gentle and begin. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5520 So this is what happens when they take away your devices? 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5521 This is how we do third-class family counseling. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5522 How long have you been shopping Groupon? 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5523 I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 10. Whoever's closest gets the top next time. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5524 Next stop, Hale–Bopp. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5525 I'm going to have to start charging you more if you want me to analyze all your personalities. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5526 Many I've let my Tapas obsession go too far. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5527 You say you feel like just a number. Tell me more. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5528 So just stop watching 'This Is Us'. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5529 Worst case of dissociative identity disorder that I have ever seen. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5530 I call this triumvirate therapy. Business increases the nearer to election season. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5531 Just a reminder, your 3 for the price of 1 coupon expires after this session. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5532 Hmmm - I'm not sure 3 people can have a multiple personality disorder??? 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5533 So all of you seen that one movie by Andrew Fleming? 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5534 Ok before we start you’ll have to pay cash to get the group rate. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5535 As you know this research is to debunk meths about multiple personality. So let’s start. You first on top. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5536 Your parents were immigrants? 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5537 Yes, Mister, Misses and baby Bear: this is a new therapy and has proven effective in 99 out of 100 cases. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5538 So you're the dark triad 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5539 You'll be billed one-third of my standard hourly rate 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5540 Jill, your dream last week was deep. Now, best story about your mother gets the top bunk next week. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5541 Group analysis teaches us that many unconsciouses are alike. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5542 With budget cuts, I have no other choice. Also, incidentally, I’m testing out space-saving living for people on a budget. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5543 OK,I get it....you want group treatment for middle child syndrome! 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5544 Group therapy bunked then debunked. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5545 Hot racking: It's much more crowded on a submarine 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5546 The thing is, you rate an AirBnB based on how it meets expectations based on the listing. And you need to consider the value you get for the price - like, think about the one inside a pizza box a few months back, this is a better value 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5547 You wanted affordable rates, so don't complain! You, on top start telling me about your childhood! 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5548 Welcome to Analysis Anonymous. Who wants to be the first to admit being a Basket-Case? 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5549 Now that the top chaise has been resolved, let’s get back to today’s group therapy session: childhood sibling rivalries... 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5550 This is a first for me, seeing three patients at the same time it must be a psychiatrist miracle! 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5551 My diagnosis? Stop watching *This is Us." 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5552 If you’ll just wait, you’ll see it actually works quite well! 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5553 Down in front ! 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5554 I feel I must debunk your group think... 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5555 Just... Lexie, be careful when you get down, ok, sweetie? 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5556 Hour three of the experiment, Dr. Adams still cannot determine which of the people is her "patient". 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5557 You should not be depressed. You should be afraid...It's Ikea. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5558 Well, since your all being wimpy snowflake men, I'll make a demeaning snarky caption to belittle all of you, to vastly increase my chances of winning this contest. You all have the delusion that men bashing has become a casual norm.THAT'S RIDICULOUS. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5559 This is best practices according to your HMO ,You on the top couch you have mild depression 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5560 You're supposed to say something in group therapy. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5561 And note that I have a special group rate ... 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5562 You on top, your mother......; you in the middle, your mother....; you on the bottom, your mother.... 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5563 I know you don't like this, but I repeat fewer conversations when I group people by category. For example: You all have anger issues with your mothers and need to realize she did the best she could. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5564 ...yes I am offering you therapy two-thirds of the price! 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5565 I know you think sharing your problems in front of strangers is bad, but this is where I tell you those poles are made out of old toilet paper tubes. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5566 Stacking your problems . . . 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5567 My apologies once again for the scheduling mishap, but on the bright side we’re finally putting this bunk bed to use! 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5568 Tell me about your counselor. 1.0625 0.03531 48 45 3 0
5569 I’m not saying this solves the subway rat problem, but it certainly makes it interesting. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5570 Angela, when does the copyright for ‘Rat Pack’ expire? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5571 He says it is 2020 and can’t be bothered doing it old school. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5572 We call him “Elon Mousk 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5573 That cat is surely sonna have a challenge 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5574 It looks like you’ve just won a game of sperm, egg and womb by capturing all the pieces, Jerome. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5575 One more time: None if you is responsible for Jack Pearson’s death. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5576 How You Feeling? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5577 Which one of you has the nightmares of being pregnant? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5578 We need one more for a group discount 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5579 For your first trial psychiatric session your therapy will all be the same. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5580 You’ve got the same parents . This should work . 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5581 So, Goldilocks, the other two couches were not just right? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5582 No texting; try using your voice to respond. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5583 I know I said I wanted to make new friends, but... 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5584 Which one of you is the superego? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5585 ECONOMY CLASS ANALYSIS: ECONOMY CLASS ANALYSIS: “Which of you cheapskates would like to start?” 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5586 Welcome to roommate therapy, where we navigate the harrowing nature of shared spaces. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5587 Trust me, this birthday party will be so much more fulfilling than any water park day pass. 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5588 Your depression appears to be the result of a split personality. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5589 Tell me a little about your relationships with each others parents... 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5590 Let’s try a word association; what does cheapskate mean to you? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5591 First of all, there can be a simple solution for many problems! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5592 Now that you have been triaged the lower and upper bunks are dismissed. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5593 Dr. Alexa identified a similar cause and suggested we scale. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5594 Again, you seem to doubt that you are special to me. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5595 So you’re saying this means something to you? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5596 Group Discount Psychiatry 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5597 C'mon, stick to your 16.6667 minutes! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5598 Please, I cannot write any notes when the three of you are free associating at the same time. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5599 Why don't we start from the top. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5600 And how does it make you feel when people refer to you as ‘the stooges’? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5601 And how do you three feel about that? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5602 Yes this qualifies for doctor patient confidentiality Frank Buckley Andover, MA 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5603 I just can't imagine how the Stack family will ever pull together. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5604 When did you begin to feel that you're characters on 'This Is Us'? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5605 Dr. Jejune attempts to debunk their social misconceptions. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5606 He is prone to anger" 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5607 Top, 30 minutes left. Middle, 15 minutes. Bottom, time to stop. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5608 "What can I say? Shrinking is expanding." ...Ray Teurfs, Guerneville, Calif. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5609 I thought that today we could address cabin fever as a group. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5610 There is some triple decker trauma going on here. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5611 If you think I’m giving you a family discount, you’re sadly mistaken. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5612 If you don't like group therapy, check with your health care provider. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5613 I’ve never seen multiple personalities disorder at the same time before. 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5614 Leave our Mother out of this, Sis. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5615 Ok, we have 23 personalities here to integrate. Please remember which ones are yours and we will bill accordingly. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5616 O.K., let's first go over the ground rules for triple-decker therapy. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5617 Okay, let's decide whose mother issues go first. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5618 Which one of you ordered the pasta? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5619 And no, I am not going to make that Choo-Choo sound again. 1.0612 0.03460 49 45 3 0
5620 This is the first time I am trying to cure a case of Triple-Personality Complex: Where humans imagine they are the Trinity. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5621 This new therapy really debunks the bunk surrounding the new "Family Bunk Therapy." 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5622 Snap out of it! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5623 Medicare for all replaces single payer policies. 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5624 What do you think of Trump's definition of copay? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5625 When did the three of you first suspect you had a fused personality? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5626 Which of the family would like to start first? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5627 I'll give you my triple decker rate. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5628 You’re not the first to conflate loneliness with being alone, but that myth was de-bunked long ago. Speaking of... 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5629 I don’t care that the president does it, Ménage a trous can be très difficile. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5630 I always look forward to my Friday afternoon Low Maintenance Group. So who had a good week? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5631 I've really got to stop using Groupon for everything. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5632 And what would you say to them if they were here in the room? (Which of course they are.) 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5633 So you all have a problem with your father? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5634 We hope you have enjoyed your mausoleum preview. Now wee will seal the doors and never bother you again 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5635 No, you can't take these home. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5636 This brings family therapy to a whole new level! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5637 Who'd prefer to leave first? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5638 Tell me about your childhood. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5639 Thank you for agreeing to this experiment in three-apy. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5640 Although I'm detecting one personality in three bodies, the bill will still be tripled." 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5641 So . . . tell me about your mother. We'll start with Bunk #3. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5642 2 out of 3 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5643 Jerry: I know you asked me of Marcia. I just felt my psychic me called upon me to move to even a higher level, to Jenny. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5644 Well, what did you expect for a $20 Groupon? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5645 The Homy Inn located in Tsim Sha Tsui, China now offers rooms with triple bunk beds, perfect for conference travelers. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5646 Good question. That was group therapy with a counselor. I am a psychiatrist. How does that make you feel? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5647 Sean, how does it feel to look up on your parents? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5648 And how did you feel when your realtor suggested the duplex in the Upper West Side? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5649 Sometimes a video game is just a video game. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5650 Yes, this is why Groupon was a stupid idea. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5651 Damned Groupon. 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5652 This is the last time I advertise on Groupon! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5653 How do you like psychotherapy for a third of the cost? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5654 Do we get a group discount for this session? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5655 It really is tough being triplets but you can’t split the bill. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5656 It's complicated. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5657 This is my first Groupon. – Haley Darya Parsa, New York, NY 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5658 I've rearranged my lounge chairs to mimic your childhood bunk beds. Now that we're back there, I want you all to talk about the loss of the two other monkeys who jumped on the bed, falling and hitting their heads. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5659 No, it is not a reverse Oreo cookie. It's by tie, stomach and pants length. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5660 What's not to like about individual therapy at group therapy rates? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5661 Upper birth, it"s your turn. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5662 Thank you for mentioning your coupon when making your appointments. 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5663 So, how does it feel? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5664 So how's that menage a trois thing working out? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5665 Our session is nearing a close, would anyone like to speak 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5666 And hen did you notice your split-personality disorder? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5667 Dr. Therapist, "So Which one of you has the love problem today?" 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5668 I’m sorry if this feels awkward, but it is a new concept in group therapy. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5669 Ok Dave, Dave and Dave, when do you think your problems started? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5670 Family therapy. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5671 Meanwhile the "This is Us" kids get there bedtime story for the afternoon nap. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5672 I need your Sleep Number to be in synchronization with the other patients. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5673 Speak to me or this bed will collapse with your emotions. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5674 My multiple personalities never felt so real as they do right now! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5675 Speak your truth. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5676 So, about the Groupon addiction... 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5677 I have arranged you in accordance with where you are at in reaching self-actualization. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5678 How it feels to share a taxi in 2020. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5679 Pawn to King-4. Oh wait. That's speed CHESS. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5680 Now even the couch class has reclining seats! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5681 This is the first time I have been lucky enough to have three clients with prison fantasies at the same time. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5682 I want you to rock-paper-scissors to determine whose problem I deal with. Hopefully, the other two aren't that bad. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5683 Everything you've told me this hour is bunk. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5684 When we ended last week, we were talking about your recurring dream about living in a yellow submarine. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5685 I wouldn’t say that I looove my current insurance. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5686 I told you guys not to try out for the football team. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5687 For some reason, I’m reminded of last week’s episode of “This is Us.“ 1.0612 0.03460 49 45 3 0
5688 If you can find one more of you I can bill this as a social neurosis 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5689 How long have you felt you had multiple personalities? 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5690 Bachelor #1???????? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5691 This next question is directed to Superego and Id... 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5692 You can't all not speak at the same time 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5693 You all suffer from the same problems, so you'll get a group discount. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5694 Can anyone think of a parallel to your concerns? 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5695 First, pregnancy is more than a state of mind. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5696 So, is this your idea of power-sharing? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5697 For next week's appointment, I'd like you to try the drive through window... 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5698 Go ahead Myra, but only if you have something new to add to the phobia. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5699 I guess private insurance IS more efficient. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5700 This 3-for-1 therapy Groupon is NOT what I was expecting. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5701 Menagerie a trois? 1.0612 0.03460 49 45 3 0
5702 Look, I know you shared an Uber but that's where this ends. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5703 Just relax and tell me about your: - early childhood - fear of zebra crossings - desire to find a life companion 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5704 Let's take our group therapy to a whole new level! 1.0612 0.03460 49 45 3 0
5705 And does that make you all feel? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5706 It's surprising that a constant comparison to the highly curated lives of the rich, famous, and people you sort-of-know has caused feelings of self-doubt. Let’s start with your parents . . . 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5707 If anyone asks, you’re “patients of Dr. Claire B. Inbee”. Enjoy your stay in “The Big Apple”! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5708 And this team disharmony is affecting your luging? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5709 Fred needs to be incubated to ensure that his baby is nourished. Who finna volunteer? 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5710 When did you become aware of a split personality, Mr. Hobbs? 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5711 I am sorry, but I must insist that you wait your turn before answering. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5712 You are all here with difficulty finding your sleep number after the showroom visit. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5713 fucked up family" packag 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5714 This new therapy is highly effective for social anxiety, narcissism, and pessimism. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5715 Now, how does this feel as a throuple? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5716 As I indicated in our last session, there’s nothing like the hardships of others to make us more grateful for the difficulties in our own lives. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5717 We call this group therapy. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5718 Your fears of the corona virus can be beaten - just relax. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5719 I realize you've been given a diagnosis of multiple personality disorder, but... 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5720 I'd like you to role play here and pretend you're being served a la carte. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5721 Well...it looks like our twenty minutes is about up. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5722 Have you been in family therapy b 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5723 Just say it as you rehearsed it. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5724 So when you told me that you feel like you live in your parents' shadow, this is what you meant. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5725 Welcome to the Fifty Minute Hour. Each of you asks three questions and I'll spend five minutes answering each question. During the last four minutes, I'll collect your checks. Now who's first? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5726 Whoever fell for the offer of "three therapy sessions for the price of one" should go first... 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5727 Medicare three in cost saving therapy program idea. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5728 Therapy lite: more billin’, less helpin’ 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5729 Tiers one and two must ascend to tier three, if breaking wind is necessary. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5730 I’m not so sure about this new therapy sharing app. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5731 Using an integrationist context, as we are doing here... 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5732 So, you have an issue about finding your place? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5733 One of you is acrophobic, one of you is claustrophobic, and one of you is sophophobic . . . you'll have to figure out which is which. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5734 my sister Sybil said I should talk to you! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5735 OK, biggest belly can start. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5736 Thanks for coming. I can now announce my innovation. I've gone beyond couple's therapy to threesome's therapy. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5737 Upon further reflection, it's possible Therapy POOL wasn't my best idea. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5738 You understand you pay triple rate for the hour next visit? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5739 Yes, John, James and Sally from Accounting. This is your company's way of saving on their health care insurance premiums. They begrudgingly cover mental health. This is what you get. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5740 Number two, if your mother didn't accept your wife, how would that make you feel? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5741 Since there are three of you, you qualify for a group discount of 3%. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5742 Bubble,bubble, triple trouble.. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5743 There must be a good reason for feeling resistant right now. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5744 Why do you think you feel like that x 3? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5745 I have cut your cost by 1/3, who would like to start? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5746 Earthquakes during therapy sessions are very rare. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5747 Before we start, could one of you tell me your Groupon source? 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5748 Wow you're in a polycule that's sooooo interesting. I mean, no really, holy shit that's super hot. Tell me all about it while I cancel the rest of my day. Hi, Bob? Sorry about your mom dying, but I'm helping 3 horndogs through some mediocre fucking. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5749 Statistics have shown that the upper class is less immune to fire hazards. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5750 Bunk Beds & Shrunk Heads, LMHC 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5751 Thank you for participating in our first speed-shrinking session. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5752 ... to the end that your respective constituencies will abandon their quarrelsome false equivalencies and coalesce in a cohesive strategy for going forward and moving on. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5753 Now imagine yourself as a car in Manhattan 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5754 Tell me how it feels to be in Delta’s new business class 1.0612 0.03460 49 45 3 0
5755 I understand that's a very complex and nuanced situation so, let me ask, how does that make you feel? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5756 George, I must admit: your insistence that you have three different personalities is beginning to convince me. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5757 This Train is running smoothly . 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5758 Welcome to Emotional, our newest roller coaster. Remember to keep your head back, your arms inside, and hold on. 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5759 Bachelor number two... On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your boundaries? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5760 Don’t be shy. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5761 To make this work, you all must be anxious, sexually frustrated, and obsessively compulsive. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5762 Sorry, your 20 minutes are up. But didn’t it feel like 60 with two more people listening? 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5763 I, too, have student loans to pay. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5764 So tell me again, how did your three way end because of fettuccine alfredo? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5765 Now tell me, why do you think the President is crazy? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5766 So I understand you had a pretty terrifying Airbnb experience with 150 of your closest friends. Tell me, how do you feel about that? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5767 Your Health Care Plan does not dictate seating so please choose freely, on a first-come, first-choice basis, without any additional fees. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5768 May I help you? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5769 What is your earliest memory, of using a Groupon? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5770 Why do you think the tv series "this is us" has had such an impact on you three? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5771 But you each said you thought your problems stemmed from a difficult berth. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5772 Just an hour until we find out the top three of the ‘Staying Awake Contest’. 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5773 As usual, first to vent gets the most time. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5774 When the music starts, don't get caught napping! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5775 So I’d like you to close your eyes and imagine you all have jobs and can pay my fees yourself. Now get the hell out and make it happen. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5776 I don't think you understand the concept of multiple personalities as it pertains to psychiatry 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5777 We're gonna need a fourth layer at this rate. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5778 Your co-pays for group therapy ARE much cheaper. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5779 OK, who wants to go first: Id, Ego or Superego? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5780 we all have trouble 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5781 Triple Decker Therapy 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5782 It's called a multiple Orgone 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5783 Just because you suffer from the middle child syndrome it doesn’t mean you have to feel over controlled or underwhelmed 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5784 It's not my fault your insurance won't pay for individual therapy. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5785 I'm sorry but this square meter cost me 15.000$, this is my only profitable option. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5786 Your co-pay works a bit differently with mental health services. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5787 None of you could quite afford the private therapy rates, so I’ put you in economy plus group therapy 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5788 OK, which one of you thinks they are Curly? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5789 Congratulation, you're finally on top. Clean the glass while you're up there. 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5790 Triple decker group therapy adds up. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5791 What I hear is your ego and your superego are conflicted. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5792 I knew you’re the oldest, Martin, but Lisa called the top bunk first. 1.0612 0.04525 49 47 1 1
5793 The good news is that your sibling journey will be turned into a very popular television show called This Is Us. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5794 OK, contestant number two, exhale 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5795 And when did the multiple personality disorder start? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5796 The Groupon had a great discount! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5797 Thruple's therapy is about finding a collaborator not a fourth. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5798 Clearly you suffer from multiple personality disorder. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5799 Feel the weight off your chest. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5800 I'm noting an underlying multiple personality disorder. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5801 And how would you rate your mental healthcare provider? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5802 Okay Sarah, let’s start from the top so the others can hear if their problems are worth sharing. 1.0612 0.03460 49 45 3 0
5803 I believe all issues involve the id, the ego, and the superego. Are you in the right beds? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5804 With the rise in patients, I’ll have to squeeze in another session somewhere. Does that work with you all? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5805 So, all of you where on the cruise ship that day? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5806 What is it about Uber carpooling that makes you feel less special 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5807 Client #2, what would bring me for our first solo session? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5808 Now, Becky, how long have you felt the ladder of success is made up of underlings? 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5809 Welcome to the Agoraphobia Group Session. Your Bronze Plans have been pre-approved. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5810 Population decline is a real issue - it keeps us up at night 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5811 Now that you're arranged by relative level of trauma, we can begin. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5812 I found this way most efficient, since clearly all of you need to talk about the re-election 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5813 You really need to express your feelings about how it feels to be the oldest, youngest, and, middle child." "Also, this way you get the family discount! 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5814 It’s normal to feel some separation anxiety after being freed from a human centipede. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5815 New therapy surfaces for “Triple Dog Dare You” patients. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5816 You guys are stressed . I have eight more sessions to do. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5817 Todd had a Groupon. 1.0612 0.03460 49 46 3 0
5818 Repeatedly, cheese demonstrated characteristics of a performance enhancing drug 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5819 On animal testing, but I just don’t know what we’re doing anymore 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5820 Well, who better to test that new travel sickness drug on? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5821 Great, now they all want scarves. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5822 after quitting tik tok, Mickeys perfomance increased slightly 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5823 This isn't too difficult compared to the Addams Family. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5824 Let’s start with you on top. When did you begin to show symptoms of IKEA anxiety? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5825 Simon says “Put your hands on your tummy.” 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5826 Yeah sure I’ll get you some more stuff tomorrow morning and I can get it tomorrow morning I’ll pick you some stuff. I have a couple stuff for tomorrow I’ll be home tomorrow at four I gotta was a way. Apple recommendations ladies and gentlemen... 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5827 Let's talk about your fears of the subway. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5828 We hear so much fake news that we switched the couch out for a bunk bed. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5829 Let’s start with your mother, mother, and work our way down. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5830 And how did it make you feel when you saw that the dishes had still not been done? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5831 Think of your progress as a multi-tier parking garage, once you find the cause of your angst, you pay my receptionist , and then you move down a tier and eventually out you go! 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5832 Margie's the only one with a fear of heights. But all of you requested tiered pricing. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5833 You do know don't you - it's the Foot Doctor store, not me, Dr. Foote, that's having a buy-two-get-one-free sale? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5834 Today's session prepares us for computer breaches in our personal information. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5835 We can all appreciate the importance of being on-time for our appointments. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5836 It's like there's always somebody in my head" "Me too" "My Father hits me 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5837 I'm not sure, I just feel like I have no one to lean on. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5838 Now let's try to shelve your trigger words 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5839 We heard you gave a group discount. 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
5840 That must have been a tall submarine that you served on. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5841 Thanks for choosing the economy class of psychoanalysis. Just remember, you get what you pay for... or is it for what you pay? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5842 I call this approach "debunking your fears" 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5843 So let’s begin our first ‘deathly afraid of groups’ group therapy session. Bob, Would you start and tell us about your job as an elevator bellhop? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5844 So, did you resent your siblings for stealing your mother's attention? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5845 Ok listen up! So one of you was alien adopted at birth and... 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5846 Will you all be on one bill? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5847 It is a triple threat without connectivity. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5848 So, how has the family rate session been so far? 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5849 Multiple personality disorder is usually limited to one personality. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5850 Your group rate session is just about up." 1.0600 0.04435 50 48 1 1
5851 No, I’m still going to need separate co-pays from each of you. 1.0600 0.03393 50 47 3 0
5852 OK, lets see if our profiling software is typecasting correctly. 1.0545 0.03090 55 52 3 0
5853 I'm not convinced you need therapy because your father isn't named Jack and didn't die in a house fire. 1.0444 0.03107 45 43 2 0
5854 From the people that brought you UberPool comes TherapyPool. Journey through someone else’s childhood on your economical way to recovery. 1.0444 0.03107 45 43 2 0
5855 OK contestants . This next one is for the Cash Bonanza . 'How did it make you feel losing Teddy the Bear 1.0444 0.03107 45 43 2 0
5856 You all asked if I could squeeze you in! 1.0444 0.03107 45 43 2 0
5857 He needs to claim we have the greatest Space Force in the world. This is all the evidence 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5858 for a change let's try head to feet 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5859 Pavlov's dogs... psht, more like... Debra's beds... 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5860 I knew I should have taken a sick day. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5861 Wow. Can't say I expected "Client-centered Therapy" to be this literal. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5862 I was skeptical at first too, but we’re getting great results with everything from fear of heights to tri-deck-aphobia. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5863 Some may call it a Freud, but my mother raised me with 3x1. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5864 I see...so you think you would be more motivated if your boss gave out trophies. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5865 My site does in fact capitalize 'JENGIAN' to avoid this confusion. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5866 Did we agree on bottom-up or top-down therapy for this week? 1.0244 0.02469 41 39 1 0
5867 Welcome to our new and improved, three-tier service." 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5868 Who would like to go first? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5869 You each have ten minutes before I ask a question 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5870 You needed to mention your fear of heights when you signed up for group analysis 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5871 No,no! You have to understand it's all about each of you and your mom and dad and not the nuttiness going on between you three. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5872 Yes, I'm an expert therapist, but it's going to be hard to debunk your claims. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5873 Okay, so you've all got superiority/inferiority complex issues. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5874 Might your “privacy” concerns really be about your fear of being known? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5875 Why do you feel that you don’t have my full attention? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5876 Randy, Dandy, Sandy, and Susan share an apartment in order to save money. It isn't working too well. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5877 Yes, Martha, Cat and I have relationship issues 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5878 Did the multiple personalities develop before or after the trip to IKEA? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5879 Couch 2 and 3, be sure to call “Bathroom” in time this session. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5880 Rub-a-dub-dub, three men in a tub. Where are they now? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5881 And remember, your 3-for-1 discount is only good for the next two sessions. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5882 Therapy? In this sharing economy? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5883 For this week's session, Sylvia, you're the super, Ed, the Ego, and Tom, you cover the Id 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5884 Triple pay! 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5885 When did you first notice your split personalities? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5886 Now. Which of you suffer most in your daily lives? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5887 It's a living! 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5888 Split-Three-Ways Personality Disorder. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5889 The downside is that I’ll only solve a third of your problems, but the upside is you’ll each get a two-thirds discount. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5890 Starting from the top bunk, what triggers your social anxiety? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5891 Multiple personality disorder seems to fit your multiple bodies 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5892 I think you'll find throuples counseling to be helpful. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5893 I've been offering online therapy like this for years, and it's worked out fine. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5894 But how does it make you feel that your insurance would only allow this couch height for you? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5895 I think that one of you has had some Corona, and I' don't mean the virus. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5896 Split personality treatment 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5897 Yes, Jerry, I am sure that “Three on a Couch” is a thing. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5898 True, their lives are also chaotic, ridiculously melodramatic and co-dependent, but still I feel strongly the This Is Us triplets were not based on you. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5899 ‘Welcome to “Discount Psychiatry! Who wants to start?” 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5900 Each of you. In your own words. What are you thinking about ME? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5901 Philip, I think it's best to be patient and not talk over them. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5902 First rule of buried alive therapy: no screaming as you'll deplete your oxygen more quickly. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5903 If the floor truly was “lava” you would have been subsumed into the Earth already. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5904 Let's review your week's highs and lows beginning at the bottom with Charles and working our way up. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5905 Next, I'd like everyone to tell me about how the gig economy has affected your relationships with other people. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5906 Let’s interrogate why the three of you like Groupon so much. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5907 Sorry, but your insurance only covers pool sessions 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5908 The family discount is not part of the treatment...it's for expediency only. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5909 Cheaper by the The Threesome? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5910 Not exactly multiple personalities... 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5911 We'll call this lifeboat... 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5912 Please remember to answer in a form of a question”. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5913 So, you feel there is a “deal” in everything? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5914 Look, you guys all need group therapy, and I can only afford so much office space. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5915 "We'll start with the top tier service" 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5916 Why don't you start by telling me how failing to scale your unicorn startup made you feel?! 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5917 Yes, one-size-fits-all therapy is accurate, but what did you expect with a Groupon? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5918 Patient : I'm just tired of depending on these pills. Therapist : Trust me. You're not the only one. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5919 Quickly now, is it Bernie, Trump, or both? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5920 Okay, I'll take the super ego first. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5921 So Billy, what does it mean to you that your mom always ends up on top? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5922 Let’s start our session today at the top with you, Phyllis, and we’ll go down from there.” 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5923 Which one of you guys has apnea 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5924 How long have you suffered from single personality disorder? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5925 An elevated stare of anxiety is natural in your condition. Except for you,John. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5926 It's new. My nihilists assembled it. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5927 I don't have a carving knife, and you're not blind. 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5928 Now tell me. Who's on top and who's on bottom? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5929 So, how long have you had joined identities? 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5930 Next week we're doing a Jacuzzi session 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0
5931 I'll say what I always say in this situation... 1.0244 0.02469 41 40 1 0