Contest #657


Cartoon

657

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “Want to go for a w-a-l-k?”
  2. “All my evaluation said was ‘Good girl.’ ”
  3. “Once you tell them to sit and stay, they actually get a lot of work done.”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2019-04-07T21:34:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2019-04-21T21:35:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2019-04-15T21:35:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued April 22, 2019
Number of captions 7083
Number of responses 1528352
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Fortunately, our time is up. 1.6738 0.05038 233 119 71 43
1 I think we can end on that note. 1.6724 0.04793 232 112 84 36
2 I'm more of a pop psychologist. 1.6468 0.05358 218 120 55 43
3 This is New York. You may often hear a discouraging word. 1.6406 0.05184 217 116 63 38
4 Get over it. You're not an old cowhand, you're Irving Goldstein from Brooklyn. 1.6274 0.05464 212 121 49 42
5 I think we need to face the possibility that she won't be comin' round the mountain 1.6223 0.05211 233 134 53 46
6 It's time to accept that she's never coming round the mountain. 1.5907 0.05064 215 121 61 33
7 And finally, "would you say that you're a man of (a) occasional, (b) frequent or (c) constant sorrow?" 1.5760 0.04866 217 121 67 29
8 When did you first notice this personality change Rabbi Friedman? 1.5753 0.05328 219 134 44 41
9 That lonesome whistle means our time is up. 1.5700 0.04956 207 116 64 27
10 When you said you'd pay for these sessions with Cash, I didn't think you meant Johnny. 1.5676 0.05197 222 135 48 39
11 We'll end on that note. 1.5638 0.05177 188 106 58 24
12 Have you considered entering a two-step program? 1.5616 0.05375 219 138 39 42
13 Don’t think of them as discouraging words so much as constructive criticism.” 1.5607 0.04928 214 123 62 29
14 You're rambling again. 1.5561 0.05149 214 129 51 34
15 Would you rather get back your truck, your dog, or your wife? 1.5545 0.04940 211 122 61 28
16 Who is "coming around the mountain," John? Could it be your mother? 1.5540 0.04905 213 123 62 28
17 Let’s shoot for high noon next week? 1.5505 0.05139 198 116 55 27
18 I'm hearing some discouraging words. 1.5488 0.05048 215 129 54 32
19 On a scale of 1 to 10, how lonesome are you? 1.5476 0.04868 210 121 63 26
20 Well, it’s High Noon. See you next week. 1.5463 0.04761 227 133 64 30
21 I'ts not uncommon for men of your age to start feeling fenced in. 1.5450 0.04843 222 131 61 30
22 You fret too much. 1.5447 0.04905 235 144 54 37
23 Let me guess: she got the gold mine and you got the shaft. 1.5443 0.04909 237 146 53 38
24 Well I prefer it to the week you thought you were James Brown. 1.5438 0.05056 217 132 52 33
25 I've seldom heard such discouraging words. 1.5427 0.05172 199 119 52 28
26 I'm writing you a prescription for guitar lessons." 1.5422 0.04836 225 134 60 31
27 So, let's talk about your dad, Sue. 1.5415 0.04771 229 136 62 31
28 Did it ever occurr to you that you done her wrong first? 1.5400 0.05153 200 120 52 28
29 By chance, do you know "Forever Jung?" 1.5400 0.05153 200 120 52 28
30 I take it you are no longer Napoleon. 1.5385 0.05149 221 139 45 37
31 That’s all for today, Sue. 1.5366 0.05334 205 129 42 34
32 I'm afraid an occasional discouraging word is part of the treatment. 1.5355 0.05127 211 130 49 32
33 Well, our time's up. You can git along now. 1.5347 0.04572 245 146 67 32
34 Your problem is you fret too much 1.5342 0.04735 234 141 61 32
35 You've got to stop fretting. 1.5339 0.05151 221 140 44 37
36 High noon... afraid your time is up. 1.5336 0.04872 223 135 57 31
37 And when did you first start hearing those discouraging words? 1.5321 0.04958 218 133 54 31
38 In your case, I'm going to recommend the two-step rather than the twelve-step program. 1.5311 0.05255 209 132 43 34
39 So what is it this time - the girl, the truck, or the dog? 1.5307 0.04791 228 138 59 31
40 Well how often did you actually hear a discouraging word? 1.5297 0.04898 219 133 56 30
41 And on that note our time is done. 1.5297 0.04628 236 141 65 30
42 Maybe it's time you did hear a discouraging word 1.5291 0.05180 206 128 47 31
43 So, stay on your meds, and happy trails to you until we meet again. 1.5280 0.04807 214 127 61 26
44 Seldom have I heard such discouraging words. 1.5261 0.04905 211 127 57 27
45 Well, you're about to hear a discouraging word. 1.5258 0.04778 213 126 62 25
46 Being from El Paso is not a border line personality disorder 1.5256 0.04791 215 128 61 26
47 In here, the whole point is hearing discouraging words. 1.5256 0.05056 215 134 49 32
48 Sometimes a discouraging word is exactly what we need to hear. 1.5249 0.04650 221 130 66 25
49 It sounds like I've struck a chord. 1.5240 0.04816 208 123 61 24
50 Yes, I have to say, those are discouraging words. 1.5202 0.04833 223 137 56 30
51 You seem to fret a lot. 1.5180 0.04934 222 139 51 32
52 So, Sue, what brings you here? 1.5179 0.05210 195 121 47 27
53 Want to grab a rabbi and walk into a bar? 1.5158 0.05419 190 121 40 29
54 Who's trying to fence you in? 1.5156 0.04676 225 136 62 27
55 Soooo -- I see by your outfit that you are a cowboy. 1.5152 0.04903 231 147 49 35
56 So you see, they're not 'booing.' That's just a normal cow noise. 1.5143 0.04971 210 130 52 28
57 Perhaps we could leave out the "and it goes a little something like this here" every time you respond to a question. 1.5138 0.04919 218 136 52 30
58 Well, maybe you wouldn’t be a man of constant sorrow if you’d just take the antidepressant I prescribed. 1.5132 0.04897 189 111 59 19
59 I don’t think you have depression. What you have is a hit single. 1.5117 0.04918 213 132 53 28
60 It's just out of tune. It's not your mother's fault. 1.5116 0.04883 215 133 54 28
61 So: happily married; sober; truck running smooth; dog came home; writer’s block. Got it. 1.5114 0.04902 219 137 52 30
62 Urging you to set boundaries is not the same as trying to fence you in. 1.5113 0.04826 221 137 55 29
63 Let’s end today’s session on a positive note. 1.5109 0.04874 184 107 60 17
64 Do you frequently hear discouraging words? 1.5103 0.05076 194 119 51 24
65 Would you describe your heart as achey, or more breaky? 1.5100 0.04859 200 120 58 22
66 Face it, nothing rhymes with oedipus. 1.5088 0.04589 228 138 64 26
67 Blame your mother all you want, but she told you not to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.5080 0.05219 187 116 47 24
68 You need music lessons, not therapy. 1.5072 0.05210 207 134 41 32
69 It's OK to use discouraging words. 1.5048 0.04737 210 127 60 23
70 And who are we today? 1.5046 0.04867 216 135 53 28
71 Now Sue, tell me where it all started. 1.5045 0.04777 224 140 55 29
72 Have you ever felt so lonesome you could cry? 1.5044 0.04745 226 141 56 29
73 You say your horse had no name. Was this a problem for the horse, or for you? 1.5026 0.05083 191 118 50 23
74 But the fact is your momma DID let you grow up to be one. 1.5024 0.04872 205 126 55 24
75 Apart from the deer and antelope, did you play with anyone else as a child? 1.5024 0.04837 207 127 56 24
76 You know, Jed, you may have to accept that she'll never come around the mountain. 1.5023 0.04794 215 133 56 26
77 I'm going to need more to go on than just the fact that you're so lonesome you could cry." 1.5023 0.04684 219 134 60 25
78 So, you've never felt at home on the range? 1.5023 0.04684 219 134 60 25
79 High noon again next week? 1.5023 0.04740 221 137 57 27
80 Yes, you seem depressed. I'm going to prescribe a banjo. 1.5020 0.04650 245 156 55 34
81 Is it possible that you’re right-handed? 1.5000 0.04262 246 147 75 24
82 Well I must admit, that is a discouraging word. 1.5000 0.04508 242 150 63 29
83 To expect to "never" hear a discouraging word is delusional. To expect to "seldom" hear a discouraging word is quite sane. 1.5000 0.04336 234 139 73 22
84 And those things roaming around on the range near your home, are they in the room with us now? 1.4979 0.04656 237 150 56 31
85 You never really felt at home on the range, did you? 1.4978 0.04835 223 142 51 30
86 Yes, It’s my job to listen. 1.4977 0.04806 217 136 54 27
87 Tell me, the discouraging words -- were they frequent? 1.4977 0.04828 213 133 54 26
88 It's okay to use discouraging words here. 1.4976 0.04822 205 126 56 23
89 I'm going to go ahead and assume there's an ex-wife somewhere in this. 1.4955 0.04563 224 137 63 24
90 It’s not that I don’t believe you - it’s just quite a coincidence that all your issues rhyme with each other. 1.4954 0.04789 218 137 54 27
91 I'm afraid you're about to hear some discouraging words. 1.4953 0.04891 212 134 51 27
92 These ghost riders in the sky. Do they talk to you? 1.4952 0.05008 208 133 47 28
93 So up until that point, you seldom had heard a discouraging word? 1.4950 0.04925 202 126 52 24
94 Let's just suppose she'll be riding six white horses when she comes. 1.4950 0.04808 200 122 57 21
95 I'm writing you a prescription for a banjo. That should cheer you up. 1.4939 0.04327 247 151 70 26
96 I am recommending a two-step program. 1.4933 0.04802 225 144 51 30
97 Ok, your wife left, and your dog died. You need a third thing for it to be a country song, Bob 1.4928 0.04754 209 129 57 23
98 This is not exactly what I meant when I said that you should reinvent yourself, Mrs. Himmelman. 1.4928 0.04850 209 131 53 25
99 So, it all started when your father named you Sue. 1.4927 0.05016 205 131 47 27
100 Let’s talk about your father, Sue 1.4924 0.05221 197 128 41 28
101 First, let’s address the achy, then we can explore the breaky. 1.4915 0.04622 234 148 57 29
102 Let's focus on the cattle you didn't lose. 1.4907 0.05033 214 140 43 31
103 I hear discouraging words all day long. 1.4906 0.04751 212 132 56 24
104 OK. So your Father named you Sue. 1.4902 0.04889 204 128 52 24
105 Therapy doesn't work well when seldom is heard a discouraging word. 1.4899 0.05151 198 128 43 27
106 Be honest. Was any time a good time for Lucille to have left you? 1.4899 0.04512 247 157 59 31
107 Maybe if you'd tune the damn thing you wouldn't be so lonesome all the time. 1.4893 0.04556 233 146 60 27
108 I have to tell you, Hank--Every week, it's the same sad song. 1.4892 0.04544 231 144 61 26
109 You realize my job is to listen to you and not sing-along. 1.4888 0.04708 223 141 55 27
110 And what was it like the first time you heard a discouraging word? 1.4885 0.04849 217 139 50 28
111 So tell me about the first time you heard a discouraging word. 1.4883 0.04735 213 133 56 24
112 Maybe you'd be happier outside of New York? 1.4879 0.04932 207 132 49 26
113 Nobody's looking to fence you in, Henry. 1.4877 0.04755 203 125 57 21
114 ...and yet, your mother did let you grow up to be a cowboy. Tell me about her. 1.4866 0.04606 224 140 59 25
115 Anything you sing in here will be kept completely confidential. 1.4862 0.04562 218 134 62 22
116 No, it's not paranoia. You really are terrible. 1.4861 0.04777 216 137 53 26
117 On that note, your time is up. 1.4860 0.04718 214 134 56 24
118 Perhaps it's time you heard a discouraging word. 1.4856 0.04642 243 158 52 33
119 Well, we each have to face the discouraging word, regardless how seldom. 1.4848 0.04585 231 146 58 27
120 Let's end this session on a high note. 1.4846 0.04687 227 145 54 28
121 So Sue, tell me about your relationship with your father. 1.4844 0.04924 225 149 43 33
122 And just when did the skies become cloudy all day? 1.4843 0.04707 223 142 54 27
123 I can’t cure your compulsive pun disorder if you insist on starting each session with “Home on Derange.” 1.4842 0.04910 221 145 45 31
124 I could cure you, but then your career would be over. 1.4839 0.04760 217 138 53 26
125 Having seldom heard discouraging words has set you up for disappointment, I’m afraid. 1.4839 0.04669 217 136 57 24
126 So, when did you first start feeling so lonesome you could die? 1.4833 0.04496 240 152 60 28
127 So, as I understand it, you are so lonesome you could cry. 1.4833 0.04896 209 134 49 26
128 No, I don’t want to fence you in, I just need to know where to send the bill. 1.4824 0.04876 199 125 52 22
129 Seldom I've heard such discouraging words." 1.4820 0.04636 222 140 57 25
130 I prefer cash. 1.4820 0.04892 222 146 45 31
131 You must understand, Tex, that sometimes the skies ARE cloudy all day . 1.4818 0.04711 220 140 54 26
132 Have you considered changing your name, Sue? 1.4818 0.04755 220 141 52 27
133 How did it make you feel when you heard those discouraging words? 1.4815 0.04685 216 136 56 24
134 Now what made you feel that Goldman Sachs was no longer the the place for you? 1.4813 0.04855 214 138 49 27
135 We'll just call you Oedipus Tex. 1.4810 0.04783 210 133 53 24
136 Just nod when it's my time to come in. 1.4809 0.04684 235 153 51 31
137 My question seems to have struck a chord. 1.4809 0.04526 235 149 59 27
138 So, you're hearing discouraging words and the skies are cloudy all day. 1.4806 0.04901 206 132 49 25
139 And do you think that there's a reason why all your Ex's are in Texas? 1.4802 0.04560 227 143 59 25
140 I feel like we ended on the wrong note last time. 1.4802 0.04204 227 135 75 17
141 So you say that you heard a discouraging word AND it was cloudy all day? 1.4800 0.04458 225 139 64 22
142 So your mama let you grow up to be a cowboy. Get over it. 1.4798 0.04841 198 124 53 21
143 I think we established some years ago that you're an old cowhand from the Rio Grande. The real breakthrough will come when you can admit that you never saw a cow, never roped a steer, that you are in fact a corporate lawyer at a large Midtown firm. 1.4798 0.05199 198 131 39 28
144 Let's start with your early years. What was it like for a boy named Sue? 1.4793 0.04714 217 138 54 25
145 How seldom were the discouraging words? 1.4789 0.04871 213 138 48 27
146 So, let's start with that: your name is Sue? 1.4786 0.04581 234 150 56 28
147 Happy trails to you. You're time's up. 1.4786 0.04620 234 151 54 29
148 I know you've seldom heard a discouraging word but that's why we're here. 1.4785 0.04942 209 136 46 27
149 Mama didn’t LET you grow up to be a cowboy, you have to take some responsibility as well. 1.4783 0.04300 230 140 70 20
150 This is just a phase. You really should re-think leaving your law firm. 1.4779 0.04743 226 147 50 29
151 Let's start with a two-step program. 1.4778 0.05003 203 132 45 26
152 You really think you can go through life expecting to seldom hear a discouraging word? 1.4775 0.04765 222 144 50 28
153 And when did these voices start their discouraging words? 1.4775 0.04409 222 136 66 20
154 Now, when you say, 'You're so lonesome you could die," what do you mean, exactly? 1.4771 0.04607 218 137 58 23
155 When did you first hear discouraging words? 1.4771 0.04831 218 142 48 28
156 And how would you define "a discouraging word"? 1.4769 0.04895 195 123 51 21
157 Well I agree with you. Discouraging words, even if seldomly heard, can still be hurtful. 1.4769 0.04864 216 141 47 28
158 But does the chord want to change? 1.4760 0.04466 208 126 65 17
159 I think the problem is that you’re right handed. 1.4751 0.04694 221 142 53 26
160 When she did not come around the mountain, how did that make you feel? 1.4750 0.04494 240 154 58 28
161 Now that we have got your guitar in tune, let's work on you. 1.4748 0.04443 238 151 61 26
162 When did you first suspect she would not be coming round the mountain? 1.4744 0.04416 234 147 63 24
163 Did you ever wonder WHY all your ex's live in Texas? 1.4739 0.04430 230 144 63 23
164 Now, play the first thing that comes to your mind... 1.4732 0.04732 224 146 50 28
165 Well, did you ever ASK the deer and the antelope to include you? 1.4715 0.05145 193 127 41 25
166 Yes, I'm afraid that IS a discouraging word. 1.4714 0.04600 227 146 55 26
167 And when did you start to hear these discouraging words? 1.4709 0.05041 206 137 41 28
168 I wish you had mentioned a year ago that 'Mama' is your guitar. 1.4706 0.04934 204 133 46 25
169 You seem a little flat this week. 1.4703 0.04544 219 138 59 22
170 I'm not going to be much help if you keep calling me 'stranger'. 1.4697 0.04677 198 123 57 18
171 It’s not you. ‘Wyoming’ is a difficult rhyme. 1.4696 0.04471 230 146 60 24
172 So, you feel fenced in. 1.4689 0.04602 209 131 58 20
173 And these “discouraging words” are more frequent now? 1.4688 0.04731 224 147 49 28
174 I agree, those words are discouraging. But take comfort in the fact that they are seldom heard. 1.4688 0.04688 224 146 51 27
175 How does it make you feel that you can’t play the guitar, you are a lawyer and you’ve never been west of the Hudson River? 1.4685 0.04889 222 149 42 31
176 And when do you remember first hearing a discouraging word? 1.4683 0.04817 205 132 50 23
177 Well Slim, sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.4680 0.04468 250 164 55 31
178 And how frequent were these discouraging words? 1.4676 0.04588 216 137 57 22
179 I'm sorry but you're out of tune and we're out of time." 1.4675 0.04414 231 146 62 23
180 We all feel fenced in at times. 1.4673 0.04667 214 137 54 23
181 I think we have to consider this as an expression of hostility toward your Brooklyn roots, Moishe. 1.4667 0.04797 225 150 45 30
182 Perhaps it was seldom, but what discouraging words DID you hear? 1.4661 0.04704 236 158 46 32
183 So, you're so lonesome you could cry? 1.4654 0.04572 217 138 57 22
184 I'm sorry, but no amount of therapy can make you talented. 1.4653 0.04498 245 161 54 30
185 Even if it is seldom, how does that discouraging word make you feel? 1.4650 0.04526 243 160 53 30
186 So far, I have that your Mama don’t dance and your Daddy don’t rock and roll 1.4641 0.04600 209 132 57 20
187 I’m prescribing happy trails, until we meet again. 1.4640 0.04497 222 141 59 22
188 I'm sure the deer and the antelope didn't mean to exclude you. 1.4636 0.04706 220 144 50 26
189 Tell me more about your years at Juilliard. 1.4635 0.04551 233 152 54 27
190 What was the discouraging word? 1.4634 0.04766 205 132 51 22
191 I get it. You're lonesome. 1.4633 0.04219 218 132 71 15
192 Lucky for you I'm a leading practitioner of Western Psychology. 1.4631 0.04850 203 132 48 23
193 And when you shot a man in Reno just to watch him die ... how did that make you feel? 1.4626 0.04712 214 139 51 24
194 Now, I don't want you to think of these as discouraging words... 1.4623 0.04649 212 136 54 22
195 How about 'If You've Got the Money I've Got the Time'? 1.4619 0.04778 210 137 49 24
196 You know the rules - we end on the hour, not when the song is over. 1.4619 0.04467 236 153 57 26
197 When did you first start hearing the discouraging words? 1.4615 0.04690 221 145 50 26
198 Aha, it sounds like we've finally managed to strike a chord. 1.4612 0.04312 232 146 65 21
199 I'm sensing some discord. 1.4612 0.04398 232 148 61 23
200 How frequently would you say you heard these discouraging words? 1.4612 0.04540 219 140 57 22
201 Well, even cowboys get the blues. 1.4609 0.04487 243 160 54 29
202 No, I don’t have a request. 1.4608 0.04617 217 140 54 23
203 Can we mosey back to your fear of intimacy? 1.4605 0.04359 215 133 65 17
204 And when did you start hearing these discouraging words? 1.4604 0.05017 202 135 41 26
205 I'm taking you off loco weed. 1.4596 0.04781 198 127 51 20
206 I'm prescribing a benzodiazepine and a tuning fork. 1.4592 0.04549 233 153 53 27
207 Just because your Mama let you grow up to be one, it's still your choice. 1.4591 0.04615 220 143 53 24
208 When did you start fretting? 1.4589 0.05019 207 140 39 28
209 I can't help you unless you accept the fact that it's "deer and antelope," not "beer and cantaloupe." 1.4589 0.04876 207 137 45 25
210 You say seldom. At what age do you recall having heard a discouraging word? 1.4585 0.04649 229 152 49 28
211 Please don't use that tone with me. 1.4582 0.04231 251 161 65 25
212 How often were you exposed to discouraging words? 1.4581 0.04289 227 142 66 19
213 Have you considered changing your tune? 1.4580 0.04191 238 149 69 20
214 First of all, that’s not a banjo on your knee. 1.4579 0.04471 214 135 60 19
215 So mama let you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.4579 0.04710 214 140 50 24
216 'You just don't have the range anymore. 1.4578 0.04626 225 148 51 26
217 Think of a time when you did feel at home on the range. 1.4574 0.04525 223 144 56 23
218 And how long have you been hearing discouraging words? 1.4569 0.04563 232 153 52 27
219 Can you tell me when the trails first stopped being happy? 1.4567 0.04157 254 162 68 24
220 That is still a discouraging word, even if you put it to music 1.4564 0.04995 195 129 43 23
221 The solution to your problem is simple: you're right-handed. 1.4564 0.05100 195 131 39 25
222 I’m pleased to see that you’re not fretting as much as you used to. 1.4560 0.04925 193 126 46 21
223 Why do you feel that I'm fencing you in? 1.4559 0.04729 204 132 51 21
224 And how long have you been feeling so lonesome you could cry? 1.4558 0.04357 215 134 64 17
225 And you heard this discouraging word often? 1.4556 0.04527 248 167 49 32
226 So you say this all started when you heard a discouraging word? 1.4545 0.04887 209 140 43 26
227 Do you want to start with the wife or the horse? 1.4545 0.04887 209 140 43 26
228 It's good we're ending this session on a high note. 1.4542 0.04248 240 153 65 22
229 It is my professional opinion that you've got a classic case of the Willies. 1.4541 0.04647 229 153 48 28
230 Hold that note. We will pick it up from here again next week. 1.4541 0.04363 218 137 63 18
231 So, did you hold them or fold them? 1.4541 0.04704 196 125 53 18
232 If you want my advice, you are going to have to change your tune 1.4538 0.04215 249 160 65 24
233 I'm changing your prescription to a xylophone. 1.4537 0.04488 216 138 58 20
234 Well, how do you think that makes the horse feel? 1.4537 0.04440 216 137 60 19
235 If you’re that lonesome, maybe you should cry. 1.4536 0.05013 194 129 42 23
236 And how did this discouraging word make you feel? 1.4536 0.05180 183 122 39 22
237 So, who am I speaking with today? 1.4533 0.04581 225 148 52 25
238 enough with the discouraging words 1.4533 0.04268 214 132 67 15
239 So when you shot a man in Reno just to watch him die, how did that make you feel? 1.4533 0.04566 214 138 55 21
240 She done you wrong...can you elaborate on that? 1.4530 0.04325 234 150 62 22
241 I can't help you. You need to see a music teacher. 1.4529 0.04611 223 147 51 25
242 It's an impossible conflict. You want the little dogies to git along, but once they git along, you feel abandoned. 1.4528 0.04398 212 133 62 17
243 But is never hearing a discouraging word a reasonable expectation? 1.4515 0.04793 206 136 47 23
244 Just when did you start feeling so lonesome you could cry? 1.4510 0.04675 204 132 52 20
245 Tell me more about your cheatin' heart. 1.4509 0.04417 224 144 59 21
246 Is that "Home on Deranged"? 1.4508 0.04354 244 160 58 26
247 You clearly fret too much. 1.4506 0.04626 233 157 47 29
248 Waylon? Am I still speaking with Mr. Jennings, or am I speaking to Mr. Cash again? 1.4506 0.04422 233 152 57 24
249 So, do you want to be happier, or write better songs? 1.4505 0.04536 222 145 54 23
250 Why do YOU think the deer and antelope wouldn't play with you? 1.4502 0.04513 211 135 57 19
251 We would get a lot more done if you stopped repeating the chorus. 1.4502 0.04491 231 152 54 25
252 Let's think positively. Your wife took the truck and dog yet left the guitar. 1.4500 0.04689 200 129 52 19
253 So, you rode through the whole desert together, and the horse still wouldn’t tell you it’s name? 1.4500 0.05149 200 138 34 28
254 And on that note,we are all out of time! 1.4500 0.04380 220 140 61 19
255 Have you considered spending less time on the range? 1.4498 0.04303 229 146 63 20
256 And what was the discouraging word? 1.4495 0.04456 218 140 58 20
257 Okay, so you were walking down the streets of Laredo. Then what? 1.4493 0.04625 207 134 53 20
258 I can't help but think you're not telling me everything. Is there another verse? 1.4491 0.04389 216 137 61 18
259 I think we should focus on WHY your wife left you, your dog died, and your truck broke down. 1.4486 0.04706 214 142 48 24
260 Either your mother, your dog or your pick-up truck. It can't be all three. 1.4484 0.04520 223 146 54 23
261 And when did you first hear these discouraging words? 1.4475 0.04488 219 142 56 21
262 You've been expecting her to be coming' round the mountain for how many years? 1.4475 0.04534 219 143 54 22
263 Let's go back to that part about your Dad naming you Sue. 1.4474 0.04533 228 151 52 25
264 When did you start feeling so lonesome you could cry? 1.4472 0.04540 199 126 57 16
265 Your progress over our 25 years together has reached a milestone. I think you're ready to add lyrics. 1.4472 0.04758 199 130 49 20
266 How seldom. 1.4465 0.04780 215 145 44 26
267 Well, it's high noon. Why don't we pick this up next week. 1.4465 0.04547 215 140 54 21
268 When we left off last week, you’d just gunned down your mother on the streets of Laredo. 1.4464 0.04636 224 150 48 26
269 And did the deer and antelope ever ask you to play? 1.4464 0.04543 233 156 50 27
270 How did it make you feel when the doggies refused to git along? 1.4456 0.04919 193 128 44 21
271 So, how often do you hear these discouraging words? 1.4456 0.04808 193 126 48 19
272 It's good that you did not shoot the deputy, but I have to report that you shot the sheriff. 1.4455 0.04510 211 136 56 19
273 Your hour is yippee-ti-yi-up. 1.4453 0.04388 247 165 54 28
274 I'll see you again next week at high noon. 1.4450 0.04901 191 126 45 20
275 Frankly, at $300 a session, your problems are music to my ears. 1.4444 0.04821 207 139 44 24
276 On a scale of A-G#, how do you feel? 1.4444 0.04827 198 131 46 21
277 So Eric, you shot the sheriff . What was it that caused you not to shoot the deputy? 1.4440 0.04271 241 157 61 23
278 Now, Jed, do you honestly believe that there's nothing sexual about, "She'll be coming around the mountain when she comes, when she comes"? 1.4440 0.04597 232 157 47 28
279 I can't fix your pickup unless your pickup wants to be fixed. 1.4439 0.04609 214 141 51 22
280 As your therapist, I'm glad you have found a hobby that allows you to express yourself. As a music lover, I'd like you to stop. 1.4439 0.04756 205 136 47 22
281 It sounds like clinical depression, but I'll need you to sing through the bridge again to be sure. 1.4435 0.04460 230 152 54 24
282 We"ll get nowhere if you keep tuning me out. 1.4434 0.04393 212 135 60 17
283 And when you learned that 'Don't Fence Me In' was written by Cole Porter, how did that make you feel? 1.4433 0.04790 203 135 46 22
284 Stop! Tell me more about this man you shot in Reno. 1.4429 0.04668 219 147 47 25
285 How did you feel when the deer and antelope played without you? 1.4429 0.04524 210 136 55 19
286 Thanks for the song. I think I know why you’re lonesome. 1.4428 0.04977 201 137 39 25
287 As I said last week, no boots on the couch. 1.4428 0.04773 201 133 47 21
288 Our time is up, but I'll allow a short encore. 1.4425 0.04339 226 146 60 20
289 Where would you like to start today? Whiskey, women, or little dogies? 1.4423 0.04554 208 135 54 19
290 There are cheaper ways to find an audience, Jim. 1.4422 0.04912 199 134 42 23
291 Discouraging words and cloudy skies are part of life. 1.4420 0.04274 224 143 63 18
292 When did you first notice that the trails actually weren't happy? 1.4419 0.04686 215 144 47 24
293 Sounds like a discouraging word to me. 1.4419 0.04545 215 141 53 21
294 You know I can’t share what your horse told me. We have privacy laws. 1.4417 0.04688 206 136 49 21
295 You really need to add lyrics if we're going to make any progress. 1.4416 0.04680 197 128 51 18
296 We’ve been over this. You can’t keep pulling the same string and expecting a different note. 1.4416 0.04445 231 153 54 24
297 So, on a scale from C minor to F sharp, how would you rate your blues today? 1.4414 0.04301 222 142 62 18
298 But why did the horse have no name? 1.4413 0.04671 213 142 48 23
299 Clinically, it's referred to as a "foggy mountain breakdown". 1.4413 0.04671 213 142 48 23
300 We'll circle back to the dog. But for now let's focus on the truck. 1.4410 0.04298 229 148 61 20
301 Except me—I know the troubles you’ve seen. 1.4410 0.04162 229 145 67 17
302 Tell me what your woman gone done to you. 1.4410 0.04208 229 146 65 18
303 What do YOU think the deer and the antelope were doing? 1.4410 0.04714 195 127 50 18
304 It’s perfectly normal to not like country music. 1.4409 0.04515 220 145 53 22
305 Seldom hearing a discouraging word is not always a healthy thing. 1.4409 0.04651 220 148 47 25
306 And why does the possibility that 'she'll be riding six white horses when she comes' cause you anxiety? 1.4408 0.04557 211 138 53 20
307 I think it’s clear. Your woman just done you wrong. 1.4405 0.04458 227 150 54 23
308 You seem a little high-strung. 1.4400 0.04442 225 148 55 22
309 If you truly want closure on Clementine's death, I suggest you add a verse about how you're now sleeping with her sister. 1.4398 0.04622 216 144 49 23
310 How long has it been since you felt at home on the range? 1.4398 0.04760 216 147 43 26
311 It's not your fault you were born and raised in Connecticut. 1.4396 0.04358 207 131 61 15
312 Mom was right. We sure are different for identical twins. 1.4395 0.04691 223 152 44 27
313 Now I'm depressed. 1.4393 0.04294 239 157 59 23
314 Oh, let me guess: she done you wrong? 1.4390 0.04652 205 135 50 20
315 I'm referring you to one of my pardners. 1.4390 0.04853 205 139 42 24
316 Have you had any stable relationships? 1.4389 0.04407 221 144 57 20
317 I'm concerned that you never really allowed yourself to git along. 1.4387 0.04589 212 140 51 21
318 The truth is you're really not at home on the range. 1.4381 0.04571 210 138 52 20
319 If you play it one more time, you'll hear a discouraging word. 1.4369 0.04483 222 147 53 22
320 I believe when we left off you were out in the west Texas town of El Paso." 1.4369 0.04425 206 132 58 16
321 If you're that lonesome, go ahead and cry. 1.4368 0.04915 190 127 43 20
322 So do you want me to cure your blues or bring them back? 1.4368 0.04971 190 128 41 21
323 I don't know what rhymes with schizophrenia. 1.4367 0.04470 229 153 52 24
324 And yet you've said you never heard a discouraging word! 1.4364 0.04228 220 140 64 16
325 Sure, we'll call it the Wild Upper West if you'd prefer. 1.4364 0.04466 220 145 54 21
326 About this discouraging word, just how seldom was it heard? 1.4360 0.04795 211 144 42 25
327 So when a discouraging word IS heard, how does that make you feel? 1.4360 0.04748 211 143 44 24
328 It is NOT YOU, sometimes deer and antelope fight, and sometimes it's even cloudy during the day 1.4360 0.04700 211 142 46 23
329 Is it possible that Clementine expressed her ambivalence toward you by continuing to live with her father? 1.4358 0.04254 218 139 63 16
330 Something tells me you don't know when to fold 'em. 1.4358 0.04542 218 145 51 22
331 We'll pick up next week with the hankerin'. 1.4358 0.04495 218 144 53 21
332 And does that make you feel good, bad, or ugly? 1.4358 0.04725 218 149 43 26
333 So, you finally heard a discouraging word. 1.4356 0.04699 202 134 48 20
334 You do know that this isn't the West. It's just the Upper West Side. 1.4356 0.04303 225 146 60 19
335 I’d like to hear more about those discouraging words you think you heard. 1.4353 0.04592 232 159 45 28
336 Really? You seldom heard a 'discouraging' word? 1.4348 0.05031 184 124 40 20
337 Ok, you are out on the streets of Laredo, you've spied a young cowboy, go on. 1.4344 0.03938 244 154 74 16
338 My wife got the horse. 1.4344 0.04632 221 150 46 25
339 So you never really felt at home on the range? 1.4343 0.04316 198 124 62 12
340 Willie Nelson or Patsy Cline Crazy? 1.4343 0.05029 198 137 36 25
341 Are you still hearing discouraging words? 1.4340 0.04335 212 136 60 16
342 Now I know why you're a lonesome cowboy. 1.4340 0.04437 212 138 56 18
343 Tell me more about your frets 1.4335 0.04629 203 134 50 19
344 Can you accept yourself as a non-rhinestone cowboy? 1.4330 0.04361 224 147 57 20
345 I understand your passion for your guitar, but you do realize there are strings attached? 1.4330 0.04669 194 127 50 17
346 First, the key must want to change. 1.4326 0.04680 215 146 45 24
347 As it turns out, you're okay. It's your guitar that's out of tune. 1.4322 0.04585 199 130 52 17
348 You seldom have heard a discouraging word? Why are you even here? 1.4322 0.05008 199 138 36 25
349 Can you embrace that you're also a little bit rock and roll? 1.4321 0.04198 243 160 61 22
350 Of course, sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.4319 0.04471 213 140 54 19
351 Would you say these discouraging words came more from your mother or father? 1.4317 0.04496 227 153 50 24
352 Would you feel more confortable opening up if we had a campfire? 1.4315 0.04504 197 127 55 15
353 I think you should enroll in a good two step program. 1.4313 0.04600 211 141 49 21
354 It's not your fault your mother let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.4307 0.04643 202 134 49 19
355 So let me see if I have this correct. You live in New York City, you don't own a pickup truck, your wife hasn't left you, and you really don't like county music. 1.4306 0.04581 209 139 50 20
356 We generally call it a relapse, Roy, but Back in the Saddle Again works, too. 1.4304 0.04409 230 154 53 23
357 Let's see if I understand: The skies are cloudy all day, and you frequently hear discouraging words? 1.4303 0.04184 244 161 61 22
358 ... and just how often have you been hearing these discouraging words? 1.4299 0.04405 214 140 56 18
359 Well on that note, our time’s up 1.4299 0.04455 214 141 54 19
360 You know, sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.4299 0.04401 221 146 55 20
361 Do you think that your expectation to never hear a discouraging word might have been unrealistic? 1.4293 0.04696 205 138 46 21
362 I wouldn't worry about it, Tex. Sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.4292 0.04534 212 141 51 20
363 We'll get you back in the saddle." 1.4292 0.04332 212 137 59 16
364 So we've established you're lonesome. 1.4292 0.04382 219 144 56 19
365 Have you tried whiskey and women instead? 1.4292 0.04145 226 145 65 16
366 I'm sorry about your dog, your mother, and your lover, but boots off the couch. 1.4292 0.04552 226 154 47 25
367 No, nothing rhymes with existential dread 1.4292 0.04595 226 155 45 26
368 Ok from the top, but make it less full of self-loathing 1.4286 0.04599 217 147 47 23
369 Perhaps you need a relationship with no strings attached. 1.4279 0.04339 215 140 58 17
370 And the Dale Evans dreams... have they stopped? 1.4279 0.04335 208 134 59 15
371 Now, tell me, when did you hear a discouraging word? 1.4274 0.04517 234 161 46 27
372 Tell me about Susanna. 1.4272 0.04517 213 142 51 20
373 How seldom do you hear this discouraging word? 1.4272 0.04778 206 141 42 23
374 You keep making this about the cattle. I'm interested in what drives you. 1.4272 0.04678 206 139 46 21
375 That may be true on the range, but in this room we do hear a discouraging word. 1.4271 0.04926 192 131 40 21
376 You're fretting too much. 1.4271 0.05035 192 133 36 23
377 Yeah, so that’s not what I meant when I said I take ‘cash’ for payment. 1.4267 0.04651 225 156 42 27
378 You say you seldom have heard an encouraging word? 1.4266 0.04394 218 144 55 19
379 So, you heard a discouraging word...then what happened? 1.4266 0.04674 218 150 43 25
380 And when these buffalo roam... is your father with them? 1.4266 0.04536 218 147 49 22
381 Let’s end on a positive note. 1.4265 0.04497 211 140 52 19
382 Time to mosey on home partner 1.4265 0.04497 211 140 52 19
383 And how do you feel when you hear a discouraging word? 1.4259 0.04373 216 142 56 18
384 I understand, but discouraging words are actually encouraged here. 1.4258 0.04628 209 141 47 21
385 Could you say more about this ‘burning ring of fire’ ? 1.4257 0.04847 202 139 40 23
386 OK, your dog died, the truck won't start and your woman left you. We covered that last time. What else is bothering you? 1.4257 0.04199 249 167 58 24
387 I think you need to change your tune. 1.4254 0.04345 228 152 55 21
388 So your mama don't dance and your daddy don't rock and roll. 1.4253 0.04255 221 144 60 17
389 Yes, we’ve discussed her cheatin’ heart before. 1.4253 0.04303 221 145 58 18
390 Would you prefer she call you a cow-man? 1.4252 0.04596 214 145 47 22
391 So what do you think prompted Lucille to leave when she did? 1.4250 0.04230 240 160 58 22
392 And how long have you been out of tune. 1.4250 0.04395 200 129 57 14
393 So you’re saying she done left you. 1.4245 0.04379 212 139 56 17
394 Why Do you suppose your mother did not want you to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.4245 0.04276 212 137 60 15
395 And these little doggies, did they finally get along? 1.4244 0.04589 205 137 49 19
396 You say your wife ran off with your best friend? And you really miss him? 1.4242 0.04348 231 155 54 22
397 So when you realized the deer and the antelope DIDN'T play, how did that make you feel? 1.4242 0.04760 198 134 44 20
398 Tell me more about why you are no longer allowed at campfires... 1.4242 0.04304 231 154 56 21
399 You clearly don't have the blues. 1.4241 0.04214 224 146 61 17
400 It's still a discouraging word, even if you sing it. 1.4240 0.04406 217 144 54 19
401 Your guitar is also strung too tight. 1.4240 0.04406 217 144 54 19
402 So, if I hear you right, you are feeling fenced in? 1.4239 0.04027 243 158 67 18
403 How long have you been fretting? 1.4238 0.04560 210 141 49 20
404 Please, go on about Clementine... 1.4238 0.04756 210 145 41 24
405 To paraphrase Freud: sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.4238 0.04459 210 139 53 18
406 Actually, I've heard discouraging words on a continuous basis. 1.4237 0.04281 236 158 56 22
407 How did that make you feel when the deer and antelope refused to play? 1.4234 0.04519 222 151 48 23
408 So it was FREQUENTLY that you heard discouraging words? 1.4233 0.04866 189 128 42 19
409 You're feeling stereotyped? Tell me about it. 1.4227 0.04603 194 128 50 16
410 So why do you feel so lonesome you could cry? 1.4226 0.04404 239 164 49 26
411 That's not exactly how your horse saw it. 1.4224 0.04376 232 157 52 23
412 Do you know “Don’t worry, be happy “? 1.4223 0.04305 206 133 59 14
413 Considering you're a rabbi from New York, the whole package is actually pretty impressive. 1.4221 0.04577 199 132 50 17
414 Let's pick it up from where your wife had driven off with your best friend in your new pickup. 1.4220 0.04579 218 149 46 23
415 But in your case, mama did let her baby grow up to be a cowboy, didn't she? 1.4219 0.04922 192 132 39 21
416 "If you have 'spurs that jingle-jangle-jingle' you've probably ruined my couch." 1.4215 0.04635 223 155 42 26
417 I think you are in denial Bill, sometimes the sky’s ARE cloudy all day 1.4215 0.04320 223 148 56 19
418 He was a dog; he died; get over it! 1.4213 0.04334 235 159 53 23
419 So, what you're saying is you're so lonesome you could cry." 1.4211 0.04673 209 143 44 22
420 You really changed your tune this session. 1.4208 0.04153 221 143 63 15
421 In clinical terms, we call that a hurtin’ song. 1.4206 0.04121 252 169 60 23
422 We're short on time, why don't you go right to the part where she took the kids and made off with your car. 1.4204 0.04369 226 152 53 21
423 Well, I see by your outfit that you are a cowboy. 1.4202 0.04582 188 123 51 14
424 We’ll get you feeling better in no time. This isn’t my first rodeo. 1.4201 0.04516 219 149 48 22
425 You know that God, patriotism, beer, heartbreak, trucks, open plains, divorce, loner status, a good dog, a ball-breaking trading deficit with China, and the looming disaster global warming need not be all in one song. 1.4200 0.04930 200 140 36 24
426 If you're tired of living in isolation you'll have to risk hearing some discouraging words. 1.4199 0.04344 231 156 53 22
427 Can we go back to that second verse - the one where you kill your wife? We may be onto something there. 1.4198 0.04526 212 143 49 20
428 So, she never did come 'round the mountain? 1.4195 0.04480 205 136 52 17
429 You seem a bit tightly-strung. 1.4192 0.04809 198 136 41 21
430 I just heard a discouraging word. 1.4190 0.04352 210 138 56 16
431 Let me guess. You're lonesome? 1.4188 0.04039 234 152 66 16
432 Tell me more about your truck, your dog, and your no-good low-down cheatin' wife 1.4187 0.04617 203 137 47 19
433 I'm dreadful sorry about your Clementine. 1.4184 0.04735 196 133 44 19
434 So how long after you started to play did your horse leave you? 1.4182 0.04359 220 147 54 19
435 So, why do you think the doggies stopped getting along? 1.4179 0.04807 201 139 40 22
436 I beg to differ. You'd be surprised how many people with faithful spouses, healthy dogs, low blood alcohol and no prison record go on to live perfectly productive lives. 1.4179 0.04486 201 133 52 16
437 I know they were seldom, but how did these discouraging words make you feel? 1.4179 0.04755 201 138 42 21
438 Have you tried just talking to her? 1.4178 0.04410 213 142 53 18
439 Are you hearing discouraging words? 1.4178 0.04335 225 151 54 20
440 I’ll have to charge you by the ballad. 1.4178 0.04289 225 150 56 19
441 Thank you for leaving your horse in the waiting room this time. 1.4177 0.04092 237 156 63 18
442 Okay, your hour is up. Next week we'll work on the chorus. 1.4174 0.04386 218 146 53 19
443 Maybe a discouraging word is seldom heard because you don't want to hear it. 1.4174 0.04386 218 146 53 19
444 And when you heard a discouraging word, did the Wellbutrin help? 1.4174 0.04442 230 158 48 24
445 When did you and your dogies stop gitting along? 1.4171 0.04682 199 135 45 19
446 I don't care that the song is dedicated to me, you still owe me $350. 1.4170 0.04316 223 149 55 19
447 Perhaps you are a bit high strung. 1.4170 0.04409 223 151 51 21
448 Let's talk about all the girls you've loved before. 1.4170 0.04288 235 159 54 22
449 Thinking back, is ‘just to watch him die’ the only reason? 1.4167 0.04754 204 141 41 22
450 Couples' counseling might be the ticket, Tex. Next time, bring the horse. 1.4167 0.04427 228 156 49 23
451 The anwer my friend is blowing in the wind. . .our time is up. 1.4167 0.04652 216 150 42 24
452 And how do the discouraging words you’ve been hearing make you feel? 1.4163 0.04528 221 152 46 23
453 I think shooting a man in Reno just to watch him die may stem from your dad naming you Sue. 1.4163 0.04483 221 151 48 22
454 Let’s talk about why you changed to a minor key as soon as I mentioned your mother. 1.4163 0.04257 209 136 59 14
455 Have you considered that maybe you aren't good, bad or ugly? 1.4160 0.04249 238 161 55 22
456 Oh well, don't fret. 1.4160 0.04078 238 157 63 18
457 It seems you have some unresolved issues with Clementine. 1.4159 0.04228 226 150 58 18
458 So how did you feel when you heard a discouraging word? 1.4159 0.04455 226 155 48 23
459 How did it make you feel to hear those discouraging words? 1.4159 0.04274 226 151 56 19
460 Your mother is not the problem. It’s the horse. 1.4156 0.04384 231 158 50 23
461 a LOT of people are so lonesome they could cry... 1.4155 0.04558 219 151 45 23
462 And how do you feel about discouraging words? 1.4155 0.04601 207 141 46 20
463 And when the little doggies do git along, how does that make you feel? 1.4155 0.04550 207 140 48 19
464 What kind of "discouraging words"? 1.4152 0.04347 224 151 53 20
465 Wait, go back to that verse about your mother. 1.4151 0.04371 212 141 54 17
466 And how did being a boy named Sue make you feel? 1.4148 0.04234 229 153 57 19
467 How can I help you if it's the same three chords every week? 1.4144 0.03992 263 177 63 23
468 I don't normally see cowboys, but I understand you pulled a few strings to get this appointment. 1.4144 0.04374 222 150 52 20
469 My pickup broke down and my dog died too. Quit whining. 1.4143 0.04451 210 141 51 18
470 Was it a broken home on the range? 1.4140 0.04475 215 146 49 20
471 I know what the song says but ‘the skies are not cloudy all day’ is an unrealistic expectation. 1.4140 0.04427 215 145 51 19
472 It’s our third session, Lefty. Let’s see if we can get past “howdy.” 1.4135 0.04634 208 143 44 21
473 It's likely that you are not used to hearing discouraging words. Your partner's suggesting you to take a bath more often could be considered helpful advice. 1.4135 0.04481 208 140 50 18
474 Well, why do YOU think you heard a discouraging word? 1.4133 0.04467 225 155 47 23
475 We'll have you back in the saddle again in no time. 1.4131 0.04406 213 143 52 18
476 If you are struggling with the words, I can write you a prescription for Lyrica. 1.4131 0.04200 213 139 60 14
477 Tell me more about your achy breaky heart 1.4131 0.04406 213 143 52 18
478 I suppose now is an awkward time to tell you, but I'm the person that ran off with your wife in verse three." 1.4130 0.04565 230 162 41 27
479 Nobody's that lonesome. 1.4129 0.04956 201 143 33 25
480 I see, and how long have you felt so lonesome you could die? 1.4128 0.04285 235 160 53 22
481 So, no more fretting and I'll see you next week 1.4126 0.04450 223 153 48 22
482 So, I take it the "drifting along with the tumbling tumbleweeds" dreams have returned. 1.4121 0.04785 199 138 40 21
483 So you’re still pickin’, but no longer grinnin’, correct? 1.4121 0.04512 199 133 50 16
484 No wonder, that song would drive anyone nuts 1.4120 0.04507 216 148 47 21
485 Perhaps you underestimate how often you hear discouraging words. 1.4120 0.04180 233 156 58 19
486 Then again, sometimes the tumbling tumbleweed is just a tumbling tumbleweed. 1.4120 0.04090 233 154 62 17
487 So why doesn't the horse have a name? 1.4118 0.04479 221 152 47 22
488 How long have you been feeling lonesome, cowboy? 1.4115 0.04616 209 144 44 21
489 Dog dead, check. Wife gone, check. Overbearing mother? 1.4115 0.04258 192 123 59 10
490 Get along little doggie, your hour is up. 1.4113 0.04022 231 151 65 15
491 Let's giddy-up your monthly dosage. 1.4110 0.04554 219 152 44 23
492 So, when you promised her a "home on the range" she didn't realize it involved cooking. 1.4110 0.04554 219 152 44 23
493 Sure. Cry me a river. 1.4110 0.04461 219 150 48 21
494 First, let’s mosey on back to your childhood. 1.4109 0.04626 202 138 45 19
495 "You'll be singin' a different tune if you don't get your boots off my couch, pardner. 1.4107 0.04389 224 153 50 21
496 You can’t blame yourself if the dogies simply won’t get along. 1.4106 0.04441 207 139 51 17
497 How does it make you feel when the skies are cloudy all day? 1.4104 0.04210 212 139 59 14
498 Let's go back to when the skies were not cloudy all day. 1.4104 0.04315 212 141 55 16
499 Can you handle a discouraging word? 1.4104 0.04616 212 147 43 22
500 And then did the little doggies get along? 1.4103 0.04210 234 158 56 20
501 Trucks break down and dogs die. There may not be a deeper meaning. 1.4103 0.04689 195 133 44 18
502 Yes, music is therapy, but I'm still going to charge you. 1.4098 0.04658 183 122 47 14
503 OK. Tell me about yourself again, from the top. But just the lyrics this time. 1.4098 0.04417 205 137 52 16
504 So let's see....you seldom heard a discouraging word and yet you still felt you were a complete failure in the eyes of your father 1.4098 0.04576 205 140 46 19
505 So why do you think your heart is so achy breaky? 1.4097 0.04255 227 153 55 19
506 Now once more from the top, only a little less about your horse, a little more about you mother. 1.4095 0.04647 210 146 42 22
507 I think deranged means something different where you're from. 1.4095 0.04449 232 162 45 25
508 You realize, Mr. Holt, I will have to report you to the authorities if you did in fact shoot Liberty Vallance. 1.4093 0.04662 215 151 40 24
509 So let's talk about the fretting. 1.4093 0.04323 215 144 54 17
510 I hope you took your spurs off I just had that reupholstered. 1.4091 0.04350 220 149 52 19
511 So you hear the train acomin.' It's comin' round the bend. Then what happened 1.4089 0.03842 247 161 71 15
512 Psychoanalysis has its artistic standards, Mr. Rupert. I simply cannot listen to a song in which "where the deer and the antelope play" is rhymed with "and I can't have an erection". 1.4089 0.04327 225 153 52 20
513 I've heard that one before. 1.4089 0.04501 203 137 49 17
514 Sounds like you have heard a discouraging word. 1.4089 0.04446 203 136 51 16
515 When, exactly, did you suspect her cheatin' heart?" 1.4087 0.04318 208 138 55 15
516 Strum a few bars - perhaps I'll recognize the syndrome. 1.4085 0.04195 235 159 56 20
517 But can you see how your need to sit around a camp fire can be interpreted as arson by others in your apartment block? 1.4085 0.04693 213 150 39 24
518 The deer and antelope didn't let you play? 1.4085 0.04501 213 146 47 20
519 Frankly, I don't think you deserve your success either. 1.4085 0.04646 213 149 41 23
520 I'm sure it would facilitate your sessions too, but a camp fire here is out of the question. 1.4085 0.04646 213 149 41 23
521 I don't think it's the beard or the hat or the left-handed guitar or your mother. You just have no talent. 1.4085 0.04598 213 148 43 22
522 I never doubted you were a man of constant sorrow. 1.4085 0.04598 213 148 43 22
523 And when did all these discouraging words begin? 1.4083 0.04378 218 148 51 19
524 Yes, but how much longer will you blame your mama for letting you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.4083 0.04793 218 157 33 28
525 Don’t fret. 1.4083 0.04659 218 154 39 25
526 Maybe... but sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.4082 0.04670 196 134 44 18
527 I don't think that the fact your father named you "Sue" has anything to do with it. 1.4081 0.04401 223 153 49 21
528 Same high-noon next week? 1.4080 0.04420 201 134 52 15
529 Have you told your horse yet that you're in therapy? 1.4080 0.04586 201 137 46 18
530 OK, the country roads didn’t take you home. Can we set a new goal? 1.4079 0.04375 228 157 49 22
531 So when did you first imagine that you heard a discouraging word? 1.4079 0.04462 228 159 45 24
532 Have you always been high strung? 1.4076 0.04678 211 148 40 23
533 Let me stop you right there — why do you care where the buffalo roam? 1.4076 0.04379 211 142 52 17
534 Tell me more about your mother but this time in G 1.4076 0.04327 211 141 54 16
535 Lonesome cowboy syndrome is not a thing. 1.4074 0.04257 216 144 56 16
536 This is New York city Mr. Tex, the little doggies live in purses and do not get along at all. 1.4074 0.04851 189 131 39 19
537 I really don’t think your problem is your truck, your horse or your ex-girlfriend. 1.4072 0.04979 194 138 33 23
538 A discouraging word, no matter how seldom it's heard, can cause great consternation. 1.4071 0.04402 226 156 48 22
539 And what did your mama want you to grow up to be? 1.4071 0.04078 226 149 62 15
540 So, you're telling me that ALL cowboy songs are really just a cry for help? 1.4071 0.04312 226 154 52 20
541 This appointment is covered by BlueCross not Blue Grass 1.4070 0.04393 199 132 53 14
542 Seldom is there a home where discouraging words are not heard.... 1.4069 0.04376 231 160 48 23
543 You stick to your notes, I'll stick to mine. 1.4069 0.04429 204 137 51 16
544 Why do you feel someone should give you a home? 1.4067 0.04355 209 140 53 16
545 So, how is your achy breaky heart doing this week? 1.4067 0.04510 209 143 47 19
546 The range is supposed to be lonesome. 1.4065 0.04434 214 146 49 19
547 So, for how long have you been feeling so lonesome you could cry? 1.4064 0.04215 219 146 57 16
548 Let's discuss why you named the truck and the dog after your mother. 1.4064 0.04596 219 154 41 24
549 You're going to have to deal with the fact that, despite all advice to the contrary, your mother let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.4064 0.04362 219 149 51 19
550 I hate to tell you a discouraging word, but... 1.4062 0.04052 224 147 63 14
551 Take responsibility, Tex. Don’t blame momma for letting you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.4060 0.04249 234 160 53 21
552 You must try not to fret. 1.4060 0.04249 234 160 53 21
553 No, really. I'd like to hear a discouraging word. 1.4060 0.04117 234 157 59 18
554 Looks like one or two more sessions, and we may have a number one country hit on our hands. 1.4057 0.04519 175 114 51 10
555 If we’re to make progress, you’ll need to say more than just “tequila” in between long stretches of music. 1.4057 0.04513 212 146 46 20
556 What's your first memory of feeling lonesome? 1.4057 0.04258 212 141 56 15
557 Precisely what word is it that you find discouraging? 1.4055 0.04291 217 146 54 17
558 Yes, of course you were traumatized when he went electric. But the world has moved on. 1.4054 0.04366 222 152 50 20
559 Lonesome trail? Try riding the subway for 30 years. 1.4054 0.04319 222 151 52 19
560 Tell me what you mean when you say you "feel like your life is a cliche." 1.4054 0.04319 222 151 52 19
561 I think it's stronger if your wife leaves with the pickup and then your dog dies. 1.4050 0.04544 200 136 47 17
562 But what does your cheating heart say? 1.4049 0.04357 205 137 53 15
563 To recap, your wife left you, your truck won't start, your dog died, and the whiskey ain't workin' no more? 1.4045 0.04346 220 150 51 19
564 Please cut to the chorus, our time is almost up. 1.4045 0.04393 220 151 49 20
565 It's just a song Randy, I'm sure your momma DID want you to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.4045 0.04200 220 147 57 16
566 Yes, but let's explore why you're so lonesome you could cry. 1.4044 0.04503 225 158 43 24
567 I assume your dog died, too. 1.4041 0.03944 245 163 65 17
568 Oh, come on now, Harley, I promise if you don't tune me out, I won't fence you in. 1.4039 0.04330 203 135 54 14
569 Perhaps actually learning to play your guitar might be a good first step. 1.4038 0.04243 213 142 56 15
570 And when was the first time you fell into a "burning ring of fire"? 1.4037 0.04325 218 148 52 18
571 Tell me about you first rodeo. 1.4037 0.04421 218 150 48 20
572 Lyin’. Cheatin’. Drinkin’. Stealin’. Go back to what you know. 1.4037 0.04276 218 147 54 17
573 When did you first notice that the deer and the Antelope were no longer playing outside of your home? 1.4035 0.04371 228 158 48 22
574 I think your doctor meant sturm and drang, not strum and dang. 1.4035 0.05017 171 118 37 16
575 Can you recall the first time you didn't git along with your little dogies? 1.4035 0.04371 228 158 48 22
576 I think I’m in the wrong cartoon 1.4029 0.04395 206 139 51 16
577 'I understand. "Stairway to Heaven" is the reason I became a psychiatrist. 1.4029 0.04605 206 143 43 20
578 Sorry, but I'm plumb out of encouraging words. 1.4028 0.04476 211 145 47 19
579 The fact that you are able to open up about your woman who left you, your horse that ran away, and your dog that died tells me that we are making progress. 1.4028 0.04162 211 139 59 13
580 So you’re lonesome, cowboy? 1.4028 0.04476 211 145 47 19
581 I'll half my fee if you'll let me try on the hat. 1.4028 0.04401 216 148 49 19
582 Sometimes, Lefty, a guitar is just a guitar. 1.4028 0.04352 216 147 51 18
583 Do you think Lucille might have found it a difficult time also? 1.4027 0.04185 221 148 57 16
584 Even cowboys get the blues. 1.4027 0.04185 221 148 57 16
585 Roaming buffaloes are the least of your problems. 1.4027 0.04121 226 151 59 16
586 Last week we ended in the west Texas town of El Paso . 1.4026 0.04106 231 155 59 17
587 Let's pick up from our last session: When did you first realise you didn't feel at home on the range? 1.4025 0.04220 236 162 53 21
588 I can probably help with your gamblin’, not so much with your ramblin’. 1.4025 0.03955 236 156 65 15
589 Two more sessions and were headed for Nashville 1.4018 0.04499 219 153 44 22
590 You need to be honest with yourself, Slim, and admit that, as a child, you may well have heard a discouraging word. 1.4018 0.04380 224 155 48 21
591 So, what was this discouraging word? 1.4017 0.04201 234 160 54 20
592 The thing is, I never really felt at home on the range. 1.4011 0.04641 187 127 45 15
593 It's not the voices that bother me, it's that they can't seem to harmonize. 1.4010 0.04536 207 143 45 19
594 Why do you think your mother didn't want you to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.4009 0.04305 212 143 53 16
595 I'd like to bring your wife in for a duet. 1.4009 0.04508 212 147 45 20
596 It's natural to feel hurt by seldom heard, discouraging words 1.4009 0.04357 212 144 51 17
597 Your ego wants to be bluegrass, but your id is just too honky-tonk. 1.4009 0.04433 217 150 47 20
598 Where seldom is heard a discouraging word" isn't a realistic expectation today 1.4009 0.04454 222 155 45 22
599 So you’re telling me your mama let you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.4009 0.04408 222 154 47 21
600 Ah yes, but sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.4008 0.04060 242 164 59 19
601 And here's the bill for the three couches you've ruined with your spurs. 1.4000 0.04413 215 148 48 19
602 Whoa, that there's what you cowpokes might call some mighty discouraging words. 1.4000 0.04648 200 139 42 19
603 Seems to be just A Minor problem. 1.4000 0.04341 220 151 50 19
604 I recommend couples counseling, so bring your horse next week” 1.4000 0.04364 225 156 48 21
605 Let’s pick it up at “torture and whiskey” next Wednesday. 1.4000 0.04488 210 145 46 19
606 So aside from your pick-up truck, your gal, and your dog, how are things otherwise? 1.4000 0.04187 235 161 54 20
607 Tell me more about all of your exes living in Texas 1.4000 0.04008 250 170 60 20
608 So allow me to summarize: your wife up and drowns, she's sleeping with the fishes. And you sure miss that old gal, but wonder who's gonna do those dishes? 1.4000 0.04499 225 159 42 24
609 When did your horse leave you? 1.4000 0.04436 220 153 46 21
610 Be more specific, everyone has the blues in here. 1.4000 0.04413 215 148 48 19
611 So let's start this session on a different note. 1.3991 0.04123 233 158 57 18
612 Stop fretting! 1.3991 0.04426 233 165 43 25
613 So, you don't feel at home on the range. You're hearing discouraging words. And the skies are cloudy all day? 1.3991 0.04232 228 156 53 19
614 So after she left you, and your horse died, then what? 1.3991 0.04092 228 153 59 16
615 Where is your darling Clementine now? 1.3991 0.04204 223 151 55 17
616 I see by your outfit, that you are a cowboy... 1.3991 0.04417 218 151 47 20
617 Sometimes you just gotta get back on the horse. 1.3991 0.04185 213 142 57 14
618 And what happened after your wife done gone and left you? 1.3991 0.04132 213 141 59 13
619 Tell me about hearing “discouraging words” 1.3990 0.04307 208 140 53 15
620 It seems like that struck a chord with you. Let's talk about it. 1.3990 0.04518 208 144 45 19
621 "How long have you been seeing these ghost riders in the sky? 1.3990 0.04268 203 135 55 13
622 This range you sing about. Was it a happy home? 1.3990 0.04436 203 138 49 16
623 Well let's see if we can get to the bottom of this, Sue. 1.3989 0.04773 183 126 41 16
624 So how long would you say you've had the achy breaky heart ? 1.3984 0.03955 251 170 62 19
625 I see. What DID your Mama want you to grow up to be? 1.3983 0.04111 241 165 56 20
626 So, you never heard a discouraging word? 1.3982 0.04277 221 151 52 18
627 Well, this has been a successful session. So far I've learned not to dig under an outhouse and not to squat with spurs on. Same time next week? 1.3982 0.04180 221 149 56 16
628 It’s not the music, it’s definitely you. 1.3982 0.04373 221 153 48 20
629 Let's play that back again. This time as "and the skies are NOT cloudy all day." 1.3982 0.04373 221 153 48 20
630 Definitely needs more cowbell 1.3981 0.04297 216 147 52 17
631 So, she slept with your brother, shot your dog, and then broke your heart, or was it the other way around? 1.3981 0.04196 216 145 56 15
632 And, just how long have you had this fear of being 'fenced in'? 1.3981 0.04317 211 143 52 16
633 I'm hearing a lot about the deer and the antelope, but talk more about this so-called discouraging word. 1.3981 0.04702 206 146 38 22
634 Have you ever considered that your girl, dog, and truck problems have a connection to your drinking at bars? 1.3980 0.04840 201 144 34 23
635 and how 'seldom' did you hear these 'discouraging words' at home? 1.3980 0.04521 201 138 46 17
636 It's depressing enough, and it has a good beat. 1.3980 0.04545 196 134 46 16
637 Enough about your pickup, your dog and your divorce; let’s talk about you. 1.3978 0.04655 186 127 44 15
638 Were you lonesome before you became a cowboy? 1.3974 0.03972 234 156 63 15
639 So your mama didn’t want you to grow up to be a cowboy 1.3974 0.04283 234 163 49 22
640 From your singing, I'd say she done left you flat. 1.3974 0.04262 229 158 51 20
641 So, you no longer feel at home on the range? 1.3972 0.04273 214 145 53 16
642 Could you also yodel your Blue Cross group number? 1.3970 0.04716 199 140 39 20
643 It’s definitely Roy Rogers’ Sydrome, Mr Fleisch. Let’s hope we can find what triggers it. 1.3966 0.04041 232 156 60 16
644 We're all bound to hear a discouraging word sometime. . . 1.3965 0.04242 227 156 52 19
645 And when you shot that man in Reno, how did that make you feel? 1.3964 0.04262 222 152 52 18
646 I know that it doesn't happen much where you come from, but brace yourself for a few discouraging words... 1.3962 0.04403 212 146 48 18
647 Have you tried not singing? 1.3960 0.04664 202 142 40 20
648 Not exactly what I had in mind when we discussed getting in tune with your emotions. 1.3959 0.04804 197 140 36 21
649 I guess that's why they call it the blues 1.3956 0.04538 225 161 39 25
650 Have you considered looking for alternatives outside of Western medicine? 1.3956 0.04405 225 158 45 22
651 How did you feel when your mama said she regretted letting her baby grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3955 0.04140 220 148 57 15
652 So you're saying your Mama DID let her baby grow up to be a cowboy... 1.3953 0.04048 215 142 61 12
653 Just because Cookie spends so much time in the chuckwagon doesn't mean he's avoiding you. 1.3953 0.03954 258 177 60 21
654 Why do you think they are trying to fence you in? 1.3953 0.04308 215 147 51 17
655 Until your guitar wants to be tuned, there's nothing I can do. 1.3953 0.04601 215 153 39 23
656 Ok, so say it's the whiskey talking, how does the whiskey feel about his childhood? 1.3952 0.04328 210 143 51 16
657 So, what are you fretting about this week? 1.3952 0.04432 210 145 47 18
658 So the range—you felt at home there? 1.3951 0.04346 205 139 51 15
659 With new medications, obsessive cowboy disorder can be highly manageable. 1.3950 0.04421 200 136 49 15
660 I believe you have the blues. 1.3950 0.04144 238 164 54 20
661 Feeling sad all the time could actually be an advantage in your line of work 1.3949 0.04558 195 134 45 16
662 Even in Manhattan, I seldom hear such discouraging words. 1.3947 0.04406 228 161 44 23
663 So your baby done left you and never said a word. Was it something you done, something she heard? 1.3946 0.04433 223 157 44 22
664 Now would you say it’s a major or minor problem? 1.3945 0.04364 218 151 48 19
665 Don't worry. Sometimes a guitar is just a guitar 1.3945 0.04216 218 148 54 16
666 And why do you feel you can't both hold 'em and fold 'em? 1.3944 0.04386 213 147 48 18
667 We've got to get past your wife running off with your dog. 1.3942 0.04461 208 144 46 18
668 We don't typically medicate for lonesome. 1.3942 0.04247 208 140 54 14
669 Medicare won't cover if you start singing 1.3941 0.04592 203 142 42 19
670 Let's talk about why you feel like the skies are cloudy all day. 1.3941 0.04430 203 139 48 16
671 What sorts of discouraging words had you seldom heard? 1.3939 0.04837 198 142 34 22
672 Now I'm going to ask you to think back to your childhood. Would you say you heard many discouraging words? 1.3938 0.04298 226 157 49 20
673 Without lyrics, we'll never get anywhere. 1.3937 0.04320 221 153 49 19
674 Look, you weren't born in Texas. Just live with it. 1.3935 0.04342 216 149 49 18
675 So, today would you like to talk more about your truck, your booze, or the woman who left you?" 1.3934 0.04363 211 145 49 17
676 You better hope I'm a better psychiatrist than you are a guitar player. 1.3933 0.04130 239 165 54 20
677 We have already established that you are an old cow-hand from the Rio Grande. We need to dig deeper. 1.3933 0.04130 239 165 54 20
678 How did you feel, when the deer and the antelope did not include you? 1.3932 0.04437 206 142 47 17
679 You need to get back on the horse. 1.3930 0.04289 201 135 53 13
680 How long has it felt like the skies are cloudy all day? 1.3927 0.04048 219 146 60 13
681 So, tell me more about this "boy named Sue". 1.3927 0.04395 219 153 46 20
682 So your mama wouldn’t let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3925 0.04419 214 149 46 19
683 How do you feel when the deer and antelope won't let you play? 1.3925 0.04370 214 148 48 18
684 When I asked you to come to your next appointment prepared to work on your fretting, this was not what I had in mind. 1.3925 0.04419 214 149 46 19
685 and what did her cheatin' heart say, exactly? 1.3925 0.04370 214 148 48 18
686 Oh yeah? Well here’s a discouraging word: your fee just went up to $250! 1.3925 0.04419 214 149 46 19
687 Can you think of any other reason to love New York other than "all your ex's live in Texas"? 1.3925 0.04164 214 144 56 14
688 This new prescription should help you change your tune. 1.3925 0.04522 186 126 47 13
689 Let's explore why your mother did not let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3925 0.04710 186 129 41 16
690 So how do you feel about your mama letting her baby grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3924 0.04111 237 163 55 19
691 This prescription is for medicinal marijuana - look what is has done for Willie Nelson 1.3923 0.04339 209 143 50 16
692 I know it can be difficult, but, even though they’re seldom, you will hear a discouraging word now and again. 1.3922 0.04060 255 178 54 23
693 Christ almighty, don't you know any happy songs?! 1.3922 0.04521 204 142 44 18
694 Once more, with feeling 1.3917 0.04226 217 148 53 16
695 Your loneliness could be resolved with a pet. I suggest you go out and get a long, little doggy. 1.3917 0.04566 217 155 39 23
696 Look, I'm almost certain the couch wasn't made from your horse. 1.3915 0.04498 212 149 43 20
697 What prompted you to poke your first cow? 1.3915 0.04295 212 145 51 16
698 So, when did you first start feeling fenced in? 1.3913 0.04059 230 156 58 16
699 Do you still blame your mother for letting you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3913 0.04525 207 145 43 19
700 So how do you feel when the skies are not cloudy all day? 1.3911 0.04386 202 138 49 15
701 I think I could help you but it would be a discouraging word. 1.3909 0.04473 220 156 42 22
702 First it was an astronaut, then a ballerina, now a singing cowboy- yet you're still in denial about having an identity crisis… 1.3909 0.04283 220 152 50 18
703 It's your mother's fault. She let her baby grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3907 0.04403 215 150 46 19
704 Your wife, your dog, your truck... I think you're really singing about your mother. 1.3906 0.04289 233 164 47 22
705 You've burnt out from composing songs about cattle drives. Have you considered writing from the cows' perspective? 1.3905 0.04269 210 143 52 15
706 Well, that's our time for today, or in other words, yippee-io-ki-yay. 1.3905 0.04374 210 145 48 17
707 You see by my outfit that I am a shrink. 1.3905 0.04676 210 151 36 23
708 Old Blue’s been gone now for 18 years. Maybe it’s time you got yourself a kitten. 1.3905 0.04322 210 144 50 16
709 My pardner will see you while I’m away. 1.3904 0.03889 228 151 65 12
710 I was going to blame your mother, but now I think it was your dang horse. 1.3902 0.04172 205 137 56 12
711 ...of course "strumming your guitar" is just a euphemism... 1.3902 0.04503 205 143 44 18
712 Seems this tendency for discouraging words has increased to more than seldom. 1.3902 0.04449 205 142 46 17
713 And after your little dogies finally got along, how did you feel? 1.3901 0.04096 223 151 57 15
714 It happens Tex, them dogies got along without you 1.3899 0.04310 218 151 49 18
715 Are you talking about your dog, your truck or your wife? 1.3899 0.04407 218 153 45 20
716 Do I know anything about anger problems? No, but hum a few bars ... 1.3899 0.04407 218 153 45 20
717 Now having established that you're lonesome and you have a cheatin' wife, shall we move on? 1.3898 0.04291 236 167 46 23
718 Normally, I only take patients who sing the blues. 1.3897 0.04493 195 134 46 15
719 If we actually resolved your emotional issues you wouldn't have any more number one hits. 1.3897 0.04530 213 151 41 21
720 You must learn to accept that with big cities come discouraging words. 1.3897 0.04226 213 145 53 15
721 Let's get back to your mother, but this time try using a major chord. 1.3896 0.03951 231 155 62 14
722 Have you perhaps considered how YOU messed with Texas? 1.3894 0.03910 226 150 64 12
723 Every week it's the same old song. 1.3892 0.04369 203 139 49 15
724 So, Lefty, all your exes live in Texas? 1.3892 0.04198 203 136 55 12
725 Tex, did you say a discouraging word? 1.3891 0.04170 221 151 54 16
726 You’re a rhinestone cowboy and all your exes live in Texas — go on. 1.3891 0.04170 221 151 54 16
727 Do you also feel you're crazy for trying and crazy for crying...? 1.3891 0.04170 221 151 54 16
728 I get that your home is on the range,but the boots have to come off on the couch. 1.3889 0.04185 216 147 54 15
729 My professional opinion is that you are 'home on deranged.' 1.3886 0.04252 229 160 49 20
730 I have to tell you, even cowboys get the blues. 1.3886 0.04115 229 157 55 17
731 Have you actually listened to your lyrics? No wonder you're depressed. 1.3884 0.03873 242 163 64 15
732 Let’s explore why you don’t want anyone to know you’re really a banker. 1.3884 0.04366 224 158 45 21
733 But you never felt...Home..on the range. Did you? 1.3884 0.04081 224 152 57 15
734 It's reasonable to now and then hear a discouraging word. 1.3883 0.04485 206 144 44 18
735 No encore, our time is up. 1.3883 0.04546 188 129 45 14
736 So tell me more about these "discouraging words"... 1.3881 0.04294 219 152 49 18
737 You have to want to change but all I'm hearing is the same old song. 1.3879 0.04256 232 163 48 21
738 I’m afraid our time is up. Git along, lil doggie 1.3879 0.04212 232 162 50 20
739 Your mother, she was also prone to rambling? 1.3879 0.04051 214 143 59 12
740 When you say 'G string,' what does it make you think of? 1.3879 0.03997 214 142 61 11
741 So, once you got your home where the buffalo roam, then what? 1.3879 0.04262 214 147 51 16
742 You still owe me a C note for last week. 1.3878 0.04293 245 176 43 26
743 Mr. Finklestein, this is a classic case of OCD, Obsessive Cowboy Disorder. 1.3877 0.04368 227 161 44 22
744 Try playing it in a major chord and see if you feel better. 1.3876 0.04333 209 144 49 16
745 I think that song about your mule is really about your mother.” 1.3876 0.04489 209 147 43 19
746 If you've got the money, I've got the time. 1.3872 0.04173 235 164 51 20
747 So you still blame your momma for letting you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3872 0.04129 235 163 53 19
748 There is clearly a link between hearing a discouraging word and your skies being cloudy all day. 1.3871 0.04220 217 149 52 16
749 In four chords or less tell me how you felt when your mother said you were all hat, no cattle. 1.3870 0.04237 230 161 49 20
750 Well, I'm afraid in here, the discouraging words come thick and fast. 1.3869 0.04427 199 137 47 15
751 So when do you hear this discouraging word? 1.3868 0.04392 212 148 46 18
752 Let's get back to your relationship with your horse. 1.3865 0.04252 207 141 52 14
753 It sounds like your mama tried" 1.3865 0.04571 207 147 40 20
754 Well, which is it? Was your father a goll-durn hornswoggler or a dad-gum varmint 1.3865 0.04519 207 146 42 19
755 And if the little dogies did git along, how would that make you feel? 1.3864 0.04374 220 155 45 20
756 I'm OK with the guitar on the couch... but the horse in the waiting room has GOT to go!! 1.3864 0.04028 220 148 59 13
757 Are you open to exploring alternatives to western medicine? 1.3864 0.04326 220 154 47 19
758 So, back to the night in question. ‘A dark desert highway.Cool wind in your hair.’ What else do you remember? 1.3860 0.04143 215 146 55 14
759 And in this dream your guitar is electric? 1.3860 0.04143 215 146 55 14
760 Why do you think your career as a rapper is going badly ? 1.3857 0.04622 210 151 37 22
761 Yes, that song does make me want to drink. 1.3857 0.04368 210 146 47 17
762 something in the way she moos? 1.3857 0.04522 210 149 41 20
763 And how often do you see these buffalo roam? 1.3857 0.04330 223 157 46 20
764 Are you saying there were never any clouds in the daytime... or the skies were never cloudy for the entire day? 1.3857 0.04468 223 160 40 23
765 I'm not sure ballad is the proper medium for your level of anger. 1.3855 0.03881 249 170 62 17
766 This prescription may help you remember that you are a classical violinist. 1.3854 0.04655 192 135 40 17
767 It's normal to miss a place where seldom was heard a discouraging word. 1.3854 0.04596 192 134 42 16
768 Taking you out of the country was just transportation. But taking the country out of you- that's the long and expensive part. 1.3853 0.03945 218 145 62 11
769 I'm not sure the "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Blues" will be a hit... 1.3853 0.04086 231 159 55 17
770 You've got to change your tune. 1.3852 0.04030 257 181 53 23
771 Can you tell me WHY you want a home where the buffalo roam ? 1.3850 0.04631 200 142 39 19
772 I want you to start the next song with "I feel" instead of "She stubbed me out like a midnight cigarette." 1.3850 0.04524 213 152 40 21
773 Let's not sing about it again. I'll just prescribe some Viagra, okay? 1.3850 0.04288 226 159 47 20
774 Are you sure that seldom was heard a discouraging word? 1.3850 0.04555 226 165 35 26
775 It all began with my dad naming me sue 1.3849 0.04205 239 169 48 22
776 Actually, I don't believe you're even a little bit rock n roll 1.3846 0.04290 208 143 50 15
777 How about some Patsy Cline? I'll bet you know "Crazy." 1.3846 0.04501 208 147 42 19
778 Of course they hate you. Everyone hates country and western. 1.3843 0.04292 229 162 46 21
779 The problem is you're too high strung. 1.3843 0.04202 229 160 50 19
780 Play that part again where your wife leaves you and your dog runs away. 1.3843 0.04230 216 149 51 16
781 So I take it, you feel at home on the range? 1.3843 0.04075 216 146 57 13
782 Around here, you may need to get used to discouraging words. 1.3843 0.04281 216 150 49 17
783 Play like no one's psychoanalyzing you 1.3843 0.04230 216 149 51 16
784 On a side note, are you looking for a drummer? 1.3842 0.04418 203 141 46 16
785 ...and if the dogies were here now, what would you say to them? 1.3842 0.04527 203 143 42 18
786 You know, Jim... from what you've shared with me so far, I'd say your problems B minor. 1.3838 0.04438 198 137 46 15
787 For starters, stop playing country music. 1.3836 0.04189 219 151 52 16
788 So your woman left you, your dog died, and your truck won't start? Sounds like you are at the height of your career. 1.3835 0.04531 206 146 41 19
789 I can’t help you if you insist on tuning me out 1.3834 0.04335 193 131 50 12
790 Excuse me. Was that “get along little dogie” or “get a long little dogie”? 1.3834 0.04807 193 139 34 20
791 Have you considered the career implications of curing your depression 1.3833 0.04232 240 171 46 23
792 For clarity, did your wife leave you before or after your dog died? 1.3833 0.04273 227 160 47 20
793 You wouldn't be so depressed if you could play better. 1.3833 0.04180 227 158 51 18
794 But lately you've heard a discouraging word? 1.3832 0.04408 214 151 44 19
795 Country music makes me want to drink, too. 1.3831 0.04334 201 138 49 14
796 Your song was only 3 minutes, but you're booked for an hour. 1.3831 0.03760 248 167 67 14
797 Ok - tell me again, but without the yodeling. 1.3830 0.04539 188 130 44 14
798 Sorry, I can only help you with the blues. 1.3828 0.04534 209 149 40 20
799 The range you mentioned -- is it gas or electric? 1.3828 0.04164 209 142 54 13
800 Fretting won't cure your anxiety. 1.3826 0.04001 230 157 58 15
801 Tell me about the day the music died. 1.3826 0.04232 230 162 48 20
802 Yes, it IS your mother’s fault that you grew up to be a cowboy. 1.3825 0.04112 217 148 55 14
803 So, is it the dog, the truck or a woman? 1.3825 0.04164 217 149 53 15
804 What exactly DID your mama want you grow up to be? 1.3825 0.04315 217 152 47 18
805 My suggestion is more time moseyin' and less time hankerin'. 1.3824 0.04400 204 142 46 16
806 My hourly rate is higher if you sing. 1.3824 0.04455 204 143 44 17
807 Well it could be worse---you could be a banjo player. 1.3822 0.04252 225 158 48 19
808 Tell me about your uncle’s sister’s cousin’s daughter’s mother. 1.3822 0.04669 191 135 39 17
809 It appears my question has struck a chord with you 1.3821 0.04123 212 144 55 13
810 Perhaps you just need to change your tune.” 1.3820 0.03966 233 159 59 15
811 What type of play are the deer and the antelope engaged in? 1.3818 0.04124 220 151 54 15
812 Firstly, to be a 'rootin'-tootin' cowboy,' you'll need a wind instrument. 1.3818 0.04462 220 158 40 22
813 How often, exactly, do you see the deer and the antelope playing? 1.3818 0.04462 220 158 40 22
814 You seem high strung... 1.3818 0.04320 220 155 46 19
815 I'd like to begin this session in D minor. 1.3817 0.04135 241 170 50 21
816 I'm glad to see you so in tune with your emotions. 1.3816 0.04133 207 140 55 12
817 I used to sing before I made money listening 1.3816 0.04354 207 144 47 16
818 And these voices you hear? they’re discouraging? 1.3816 0.04245 207 142 51 14
819 Your problem isn't a mental block. Your problem is that you are trying to play a right-handed guitar. 1.3816 0.04190 207 141 53 13
820 I thought we both agreed it was time to move on from Clementine. 1.3816 0.04212 228 160 49 19
821 Let's see how this plays out. 1.3814 0.04558 194 136 42 16
822 On the road AGAIN?? 1.3814 0.04291 215 150 48 17
823 Our hour is nearly up. Why don't you play us out? 1.3814 0.04136 215 147 54 14
824 Do you think there is any possibility that the song itself is what caused Mary-Lou to leave? 1.3812 0.04134 223 154 53 16
825 Don't start our session with, "I'm an old cow haaaaand, on Lorazepaaaaam". 1.3810 0.04414 210 148 44 18
826 Could it be that your doggies got along for a reason? 1.3810 0.04148 210 143 54 13
827 You say you drink whiskey, drive a truck, and got yourself a fine woman, but your Boston accent tells a different story 1.3808 0.03851 239 162 63 14
828 Mothering style can be important. What happened after she shot your pa? 1.3807 0.04249 218 152 49 17
829 Have you thought about the fact that you have no home, that there are no buffalo, and that it's cloudy all day. 1.3807 0.04347 218 154 45 19
830 Well, if it helps to know, even cowgirls get the blues." 1.3807 0.04271 197 134 51 12
831 ...and just what is about the deer and the antelope playing that disturbs you? 1.3804 0.04793 184 131 36 17
832 Rhymes with “Oedipus”? Nothing that I can think of. 1.3803 0.04369 213 150 45 18
833 As I've told you, she'll be coming around the mountain when she comes. 1.3800 0.04570 200 142 40 18
834 And sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.3799 0.04010 229 157 57 15
835 Well . . . when I'm so lonesome, I cry 1.3798 0.04495 208 148 41 19
836 Just how many verses are there? 1.3797 0.04007 237 164 56 17
837 Let's return from yonder for a moment. 1.3796 0.04423 216 154 42 20
838 So you are saying the skies really are cloudy all day? 1.3795 0.04237 195 132 52 11
839 What is it about the relationship between the deer and the antelope that bothers you? 1.3795 0.04021 224 153 57 14
840 Now, tell me when you first began hearing discouraging words. 1.3793 0.04242 203 139 51 13
841 All right, let's talk some more about your first rodeo. 1.3792 0.03928 240 165 59 16
842 Well I see your time is up.....git along little dogie. 1.3791 0.04397 211 149 44 18
843 On The Couch Again" is certain to be the next big Willie Nelson hit 1.3791 0.04397 211 149 44 18
844 So why do you think it is you are so lonesome you could cry? 1.3790 0.04183 219 152 51 16
845 you're too highly strung 1.3790 0.04183 219 152 51 16
846 And when did this desire to poke cows begin? 1.3789 0.04313 227 162 44 21
847 You might have more commercial success if you stop singing all your songs in French. 1.3788 0.04489 198 139 43 16
848 So how long have you felt in need of a home where the buffalo roam? 1.3787 0.04030 235 163 55 17
849 I've heard your story before , but in a different key. 1.3787 0.03892 235 160 61 14
850 Well, of course you are lonely, cowpoke, it's part of the job. 1.3787 0.03984 235 162 57 16
851 Seldom as they may be, tell me more about these discouraging words.” 1.3787 0.04206 235 167 47 21
852 But the cows never came home, did they pardner? 1.3785 0.04452 214 153 41 20
853 Aside from being a left-handed flamenco guitarist in Nashville is there anything else that isn’t working for you? 1.3785 0.04302 214 150 47 17
854 Fred, for the last time, I’m a therapist, not a lyricist.” 1.3785 0.04198 214 148 51 15
855 You seem to have a range of issues, only one is your home 1.3784 0.04288 222 157 46 19
856 When you punched that dogey, how did it make you feel? 1.3784 0.04335 222 158 44 20
857 OK, so in our last session we were discussing your being so lonesome you could die. 1.3780 0.04477 209 149 41 19
858 "Why did you find this word so discouraging?" 1.3780 0.04477 209 149 41 19
859 And how often have you heard that discouraging word? 1.3776 0.04002 241 168 55 18
860 Lets talk more about what your mother told you not to grow up to be... 1.3776 0.04342 196 135 48 13
861 Sometimes a tumbleweed is just a tumbleweed. 1.3775 0.03912 249 173 58 18
862 Let's explore those friends in low places you keep referring to. 1.3775 0.04168 204 139 53 12
863 Yes, well...hmm. Okay, that’s a ballad point. 1.3774 0.04224 212 147 50 15
864 Yes, I know that "nobody knows the trouble you've seen." Let's move on. 1.3774 0.04329 212 149 46 17
865 That's nice but most people just talk. 1.3773 0.04067 220 151 55 14
866 Do you know 'Home on derange?' 1.3773 0.04168 220 153 51 16
867 Well I know that you’ve seldom heard a discouraging word, but something is troubling you. 1.3772 0.04113 228 159 52 17
868 How does your horse feel about this? 1.3771 0.04695 175 122 40 13
869 Let's start with the boy named Sue 1.3771 0.03971 236 163 57 16
870 But how does it make you FEEL that your dog died, your mama went to prison, and the old ranch ain't never been the same? 1.3769 0.04296 199 137 49 13
871 Don't worry. You're a singing cowboy. It's the lonesome cowboys who are hard to treat. 1.3768 0.04348 207 145 46 16
872 It's not necessary to make up a song for each answer to my questions 1.3768 0.04454 207 147 42 18
873 So when did you first realize that you couldn't sing? 1.3767 0.04319 223 159 44 20
874 Analytically speaking, your G string needs tightening. 1.3763 0.04563 186 130 42 14
875 Do your other personalities resent your success? 1.3763 0.04627 186 131 40 15
876 I’ve heard about a cheating heart and being so lonesome you could cry. Now, why did your parents name you Sue? 1.3762 0.04366 202 141 46 15
877 Interesting...now did the girl leave with your truck before or after your dog died? 1.3762 0.04303 210 147 47 16
878 Something tells me you’re not at home on the range. 1.3762 0.04250 210 146 49 15
879 When I recommended you stop playing second fiddle this isn’t what I meant. 1.3762 0.04408 210 149 43 18
880 Don’t beat yourself up. It’s difficult to hear that first discouraging word. 1.3761 0.04142 218 151 52 15
881 Let's see. Your wife left you, your dog died, your truck broke down, and you're out of beer. So how do you feel about all that? 1.3761 0.04142 218 151 52 15
882 It sounds as though you have a range of problems 1.3761 0.04292 218 154 46 18
883 When did you begin hearing more discouraging words? 1.3761 0.04193 218 152 50 16
884 Our three minutes are up... 1.3761 0.04243 218 153 48 17
885 Tell me again about your Achy Breaky Heart. 1.3761 0.04259 234 168 44 22
886 At what point did you start to feel like the range was no longer your home? 1.3761 0.04216 234 167 46 21
887 I want to revisit your story about a man named Jed. 1.3756 0.04209 205 141 51 13
888 my advice?...you can pick your friends, and you can pick your guitar, but you cant pick your friend's guitar. 1.3756 0.04265 205 142 49 14
889 So in your dream there were no strings attached? 1.3756 0.04484 205 146 41 18
890 It's not worth fretting over. 1.3756 0.04561 213 155 36 22
891 You need more pluck. 1.3756 0.04155 213 147 52 14
892 So what do you miss the most: your ex, your dog, or your pick-up? 1.3756 0.04346 221 158 43 20
893 Our hour is up, Dale. We'll pick it up next week where your dog died. 1.3755 0.04004 229 158 56 15
894 And how do you reckon you feel about that? 1.3755 0.04145 229 161 50 18
895 Mosey on down through your childhood for me. 1.3755 0.04002 237 165 55 17
896 Got it. Your mother didn't want you to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3750 0.04331 208 146 46 16
897 Maybe you should consider setting boundaries with the buffalo. 1.3750 0.04350 224 161 42 21
898 And what do you think these 'prairie dogs' represent? 1.3750 0.04113 224 156 52 16
899 What do you think causes this feeling of being out of place in Manhattan, Joe-Bob? 1.3750 0.04115 216 149 53 14
900 Well, how do all the discouraging words you’ve heard make you feel? 1.3744 0.03978 227 156 57 14
901 Even cowboys get the blues, Tex. 1.3744 0.04075 227 158 53 16
902 I am worried that every time you talk about your mother you pluck the G string. 1.3744 0.04352 227 164 41 22
903 So it bothers you that your mama allowed you to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3744 0.04177 219 153 50 16
904 Frankly, I just think you need to cowboy up. 1.3744 0.04024 219 150 56 13
905 And when was it that you first started not to feel at home on the range? 1.3744 0.04492 211 152 39 20
906 And how often do you hear this ‘discouraging word?’ 1.3744 0.04177 203 139 52 12
907 The words will come when you are ready 1.3739 0.04032 238 167 53 18
908 You lost your job, your dog, and your woman...anything else? 1.3738 0.04412 206 146 43 17
909 I want to help you fix your achy breaky heart. 1.3738 0.04078 206 140 55 11
910 Sorry for the discouraging words. 1.3738 0.04466 206 147 41 18
911 And, then what happened after you got to Phoenix? 1.3737 0.04366 198 138 46 14
912 If I'm understanding the last verse correctly--you're dog stopped running and your truck ran off with your wife? 1.3737 0.04595 198 142 38 18
913 Who did you say recommended me? 1.3737 0.04554 190 134 41 15
914 You say every time your mother gave you something it came with strings attached? 1.3735 0.03823 249 172 61 16
915 ok, let's start with why you're not wearing pants. 1.3734 0.04092 233 164 51 18
916 Home, home on derange 1.3734 0.04047 233 163 53 17
917 Can you play "if you got the money, I got the time"?​ 1.3734 0.04480 233 173 33 27
918 Time's up. Git Along Little Dogey. 1.3733 0.04194 225 159 48 18
919 So, how long have you imagined yourself skilled on the guitar? 1.3733 0.04401 217 156 41 20
920 Vienna has the same number of syllables as Loredo. See if that works. 1.3733 0.03994 217 148 57 12
921 No trumpet this week. I think we’re making progress. 1.3733 0.04099 217 150 53 14
922 You're right. Nothing rhymes with "lonesome". 1.3732 0.04260 209 146 48 15
923 It will be easier if you don't feel the need to rhyme everything you tell me. 1.3732 0.04367 209 148 44 17
924 So you're saying that your parents gave your brother the astronaut costume. 1.3731 0.04544 201 144 39 18
925 ...and you say you seldom heard a discouraging word? 1.3730 0.03664 252 171 68 13
926 Your psychological problems are concerning, but your intonation and phrasing are masterful 1.3729 0.03731 236 159 66 11
927 The wife in your song clearly represents the animus, and the pick-up truck symbolizes the sacred. The runaway dog is, well, just a dog. 1.3727 0.04111 220 153 52 15
928 I didn’t ask you about your truck, woman or dog. I asked you about your mother. 1.3727 0.04161 220 154 50 16
929 Looks like we're just about out of time, so we'll end on that note. 1.3727 0.04111 220 153 52 15
930 So why do you think Clementine isn't your darling anymore? 1.3726 0.04322 212 150 45 17
931 I'm pleased with the new drug you're on, the lyrics have definitely improved 1.3726 0.04374 212 151 43 18
932 Face it, John..words can be discouraging, and it does get cloudy. 1.3725 0.04051 247 176 50 21
933 So, you say you have an achy breaky heart? 1.3723 0.04023 231 161 54 16
934 I see a whole range of issues here. 1.3723 0.04069 231 162 52 17
935 Cowboys are suppose to be lonesome. 1.3722 0.04023 223 154 55 14
936 So how did that make you feel when your dogies refused to get along. 1.3722 0.04171 223 157 49 17
937 But give your mama some credit: she did let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3722 0.04266 223 159 45 19
938 If we do cure your depression, you realize you will lose your ability to write country western songs, right? 1.3720 0.03945 207 139 59 9
939 Well that must've been one doozy of a discouraging word... 1.3719 0.04026 242 171 52 19
940 When we left off last session, you were describing how much you hated the G7 chord. 1.3719 0.04685 199 145 34 20
941 Well, those were certainly discouraging words. I suggest you keep them between us. 1.3719 0.04575 199 143 38 18
942 Don’t move. I’m almost finished drawing the guitar. 1.3718 0.04122 234 166 49 19
943 So, enough about you; play Misty for me. 1.3718 0.04210 234 168 45 21
944 It sounds minor to me. 1.3717 0.04131 226 159 50 17
945 Face it. Not every guitar player is a chick magnet. 1.3716 0.04032 218 150 55 13
946 You need to start finding more constructive words to rhyme with 'truck.' 1.3716 0.04384 218 157 41 20
947 I'm sorry, but we're out of tune for today" 1.3716 0.04432 218 158 39 21
948 Perhaps it’s because you’re right handed. 1.3714 0.04604 210 154 34 22
949 Let go of it. Your not the first singing cowboy that had to eat his horse. 1.3714 0.04349 210 149 44 17
950 When did you start uttering discouraging words? 1.3713 0.04214 237 171 44 22
951 No, I won't stop asking highfalutin' questions. 1.3713 0.04525 202 145 39 18
952 And do you remember when you felt home on the range? 1.3713 0.04471 202 144 41 17
953 Now, I think the problem began when your mama let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3713 0.04415 202 143 43 16
954 Sing with me, 'Yesterday, when I was Jung . . .' 1.3712 0.04451 229 169 35 25
955 I said late onset sturm und drang, not strum and twang. 1.3711 0.04659 194 140 36 18
956 Before we begin, Tex, I must point out you still owe 100 buckaroos for our last session. 1.3711 0.04301 194 134 48 12
957 You can't expect all your little doggies to get along. 1.3711 0.04543 194 138 40 16
958 So, your momma did let you grow up to be a cowboy... 1.3710 0.04195 221 156 48 17
959 How about ‘Happy Trails’? 1.3710 0.03994 221 152 56 13
960 So, you were home on the range and heard a discouraging word. 1.3710 0.04292 221 158 44 19
961 Tell me more about this place where the deer and the antelope play... 1.3709 0.04254 213 150 47 16
962 Tell me more about this achy breaky heart? 1.3707 0.04009 232 162 54 16
963 Let's explore that lyric "Mamas don't let your sons grow up to be cowboys..." 1.3706 0.04317 197 137 47 13
964 What would like to discuss first: your dog that died, your truck that broke down or how your neighbor stole your wife? 1.3704 0.04212 216 152 48 16
965 I see our time's up, so let's save your little dogies' adamant refusal to get along until next week. 1.3704 0.04160 216 151 50 15
966 So if I’m hearing you correctly, you shot a man in Reno just to watch him die... 1.3704 0.03948 216 147 58 11
967 I believe the broken heart will heal and the whiskey addiction is treatable, but we're going to need another few sessions to address this passion for your truck. 1.3704 0.04411 216 156 40 20
968 Alright Dave, let's try the doctor outfit next week. 1.3704 0.04627 189 135 38 16
969 What is your cheating heart telling you? 1.3704 0.03883 243 169 58 16
970 Well, that was lovely. But if you’ve really got a ‘Ring of Fire’ I’d really recommend seeing your Doctor. 1.3702 0.04063 235 166 51 18
971 You need to get more in tune with your feelings." 1.3702 0.04430 208 149 41 18
972 And what changes are you willing to make for Trigger? 1.3700 0.04301 227 164 42 21
973 Ok, I think we’ve covered your dog’s death pretty thoroughly... 1.3700 0.04445 200 142 42 16
974 What does "he's all hat and no cattle" mean to you? 1.3700 0.04330 200 140 46 14
975 Be that as it may, I can't promise that you won't hear any discouraging words here. 1.3700 0.04388 200 141 44 15
976 The term is not 'the West;' it's "The Upper West Side. 1.3699 0.04069 219 152 53 14
977 Sometimes a guitar is just a guitar, Mr. Hershberg. 1.3697 0.04384 211 151 42 18
978 We’ve been over this before ‘you play the same notes, you get the same song’. 1.3696 0.04260 230 166 43 21
979 How unusual—Stage fright AND stagecoach fright. 1.3696 0.04170 230 164 47 19
980 It sounds like your a bit high strung. 1.3696 0.04215 230 165 45 20
981 I'm prescribing an anti-depressant and a musical genre other than the blues 1.3695 0.04452 203 145 41 17
982 So you're lonesome.. what else? 1.3694 0.04276 222 159 44 19
983 It's not only your inner soul that you aren't in tune with. 1.3694 0.04324 222 160 42 20
984 How was your relationship with Dinah before you caught her in the kitchen with the Banjo strummer? 1.3693 0.04522 176 122 43 11
985 I can cure your depression, but your ballads will become boring as hell. 1.3692 0.04237 214 151 47 16
986 Sometimes a left-handed guitar is just a left-handed guitar. 1.3690 0.04667 168 117 40 11
987 'Let's start by addressing your achy breaky heart." 1.3690 0.04535 187 132 41 14
988 How long have you been fretting over this? 1.3690 0.04782 187 136 33 18
989 Indeed,sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.3689 0.04297 206 145 46 15
990 You're married. "Nary is heard a discouraging word," is not a reasonable expectation. 1.3689 0.04043 225 157 53 15
991 Let’s pick up with the second verse next week. 1.3689 0.04092 225 158 51 16
992 I wouldn't presume to know whether Dr. Freud had firsthand experience with any hard-drinkin', trash-talkin', bowlegged women from San Antone. 1.3689 0.04043 225 157 53 15
993 Take it from the second verse, the one about your mother. 1.3687 0.04239 198 137 49 12
994 I think I can name your issues in 3 notes. 1.3687 0.04296 217 155 44 18
995 I'm not supposed to offer an opinion; but I hate country music. 1.3687 0.04345 217 156 42 19
996 Your wife left, your dog died, your story has touched my achy breaky heart. Five hundred bucks, cowboy. 1.3687 0.04196 217 153 48 16
997 And your mother, she didn't let her baby grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3687 0.04345 217 156 42 19
998 Sometimes, a song about a horse, is only about a horse... 1.3684 0.04101 228 161 50 17
999 So that's gamblin', drinkin', brawlin', crashin' the truck, lovin' too much, fallin' out of love and that little misunderstanding in Jackson... now tell me about your mother. 1.3684 0.04101 228 161 50 17
1000 Let's focus on your day job as a lawyer, shall we? 1.3682 0.04254 220 157 45 18
1001 So,you're mother didn't want you to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3679 0.04315 212 151 44 17
1002 Good, we're getting somewhere...now tell me more about the ex that doesn't live in Texas. 1.3679 0.04103 212 147 52 13
1003 It’s always the same old song with you. 1.3676 0.04324 204 144 45 15
1004 Since you treated me to two verses of "Don't fence me in" can I assume you have commitment issues? 1.3674 0.04272 215 153 45 17
1005 And finally, I think you should consider your friends calling you "Lefty" as a term of endearment, not a personal attack. 1.3674 0.03900 215 146 59 10
1006 If you really want closure, try resolving back to E flat major. 1.3674 0.04323 215 154 43 18
1007 Home, home on derange," you say. Very interesting 1.3673 0.04446 196 139 42 15
1008 Don’t play it again, Sam 1.3671 0.04280 207 146 46 15
1009 Good progress this week. Next week, let's work on the chorus. 1.3671 0.03807 237 163 61 13
1010 It’s unclear whether the lyrics lead to your feelings of inadequacy or if the inadequacy fuels your lyrics. Either way, I think you’re onto a hit. 1.3670 0.04025 218 151 54 13
1011 So, if I understand you, your girl left with your dog in your truck. Why do you think she left your guitar? 1.3670 0.04230 218 155 46 17
1012 Tell me more about your new song, "Home, Home, And Deranged." 1.3670 0.04230 218 155 46 17
1013 Next session please bring in your horse. 1.3669 0.03909 248 175 55 18
1014 Have you thought about playing Western music instead of Stravinsky? 1.3668 0.04456 199 142 41 16
1015 You might consider enrolling in a two step program...they’re a lot of good ones out there. 1.3668 0.04568 199 144 37 18
1016 . . .well, it's still $300 an hour, Pardner. 1.3668 0.04678 199 146 33 20
1017 ‘Mama Tried’ is a good start . . . . 1.3665 0.04286 221 159 43 19
1018 So what you're saying is that you don't feel at home on the range? 1.3665 0.04139 221 156 49 16
1019 I think that this should be off the record. 1.3665 0.04139 221 156 49 16
1020 So you're saying at home, seldom is heard an ENCOURAGING word? 1.3665 0.03936 221 152 57 12
1021 And when the little dogies won't git along, how does that make you feel? 1.3665 0.04039 221 154 53 14
1022 Other than warm beer & cold women, are there any other issues you'd care to discuss? 1.3663 0.04295 202 142 46 14
1023 I see this a lot with electric car owners. It’s called Range Anxiety. 1.3663 0.04352 202 143 44 15
1024 You haven't been practicing. 1.3662 0.04350 213 153 42 18
1025 Before we begin, I have to know why cows are called dogies. 1.3661 0.04149 224 159 48 17
1026 When did you first realize you couldn't play guitar well? 1.3661 0.04100 224 158 50 16
1027 If I were you, I wouldn't fret 1.3661 0.04149 224 159 48 17
1028 Tell me more. Why didn't Mamma want her baby to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3660 0.04476 194 138 41 15
1029 Tell me the part about the deer and antelope again. 1.3660 0.04012 235 166 52 17
1030 I can’t think of anything that rhymes with manure. 1.3660 0.03967 235 165 54 16
1031 Your first problem is you are left-handed. You need to have the guitar restrung. 1.3659 0.04470 205 148 39 18
1032 Something tells me you are lonesome and a long way from home. 1.3657 0.04101 216 151 51 14
1033 Any chance you could take off those shit-kickers before you lay down on my couch? 1.3657 0.04306 216 155 43 18
1034 Have you considered going East? 1.3656 0.04250 227 164 43 20
1035 Or you may be suffering from Rio Grandiosity. 1.3656 0.03916 227 157 57 13
1036 So, your mother sang "Mama, don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys?" How did it make you feel? 1.3654 0.04152 208 145 50 13
1037 Would it help if I put some beans on the fire? 1.3653 0.04062 219 153 52 14
1038 But it IS the same old song, Joe. 1.3652 0.03977 230 161 54 15
1039 So you have been doing a lot pickin’ but not much grinnin’ right? 1.3652 0.04118 230 164 48 18
1040 But you're NOT 'Home on the Range' so get your damn boots off my settee. 1.3651 0.04496 189 134 41 14
1041 Last time we left off at, "where the deer and the antelope play." 1.3650 0.04264 200 140 47 13
1042 Try a major chord there. It won't seem so depressing. 1.3649 0.04325 211 151 43 17
1043 Would you care to tell me more about why you left the New York Philharmonic? 1.3649 0.04429 211 153 39 19
1044 Yet despite this Mr. Nelson's warning, she still let you grow up to be one. 1.3649 0.04166 211 148 49 14
1045 I'm beginning to see why you are the lone ranger. 1.3649 0.04364 222 162 39 21
1046 You can just tell me this time. No need to yodel. 1.3649 0.04074 222 156 51 15
1047 You are a country musician. Singing and talking about troubles is your job. Why are you REALLY here? 1.3646 0.04384 192 135 44 13
1048 Let’s take it from the top. 1.3645 0.04333 214 154 42 18
1049 Now play 'Crazy'! 1.3645 0.04230 214 152 46 16
1050 That’s progress. You’ve finally changed your tune. 1.3645 0.04017 214 148 54 12
1051 How do you see the deer/antelope relationship? 1.3644 0.03886 225 155 58 12
1052 If you're taking requests, how about "Cry Me a River." 1.3644 0.04181 225 161 46 18
1053 And where would you say your depression ranks on a scale from one to high falutin-est? 1.3641 0.04289 217 156 43 18
1054 We made progress. Remember the accordion? 1.3641 0.04388 217 158 39 20
1055 Sometimes a little dogie is just a little dogie. 1.3640 0.04051 239 171 49 19
1056 First of all, I can't just give you a home. 1.3636 0.04405 209 151 40 18
1057 And your saying she was warned to not let her babies grow up to be cowboys? 1.3636 0.04247 220 158 44 18
1058 Get yourself a new dog, a new wife, and a new trailer" 1.3636 0.04198 220 157 46 17
1059 I think we can safely blame Mama for letting you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3636 0.04136 209 146 50 13
1060 I hear you saying that you spent a lot of time with the little dogey, but did you get along? 1.3636 0.04047 220 154 52 14
1061 I understand your concern, Tex, but sometimes a guitar is just a guitar! 1.3636 0.04098 220 155 50 15
1062 It's hard to believe you are taking this seriously, when you keep singing "Home, Home I'm Deranged." 1.3636 0.04149 231 166 46 19
1063 Thank the Lord and Greyhound that she’s gone. 1.3632 0.04242 234 171 41 22
1064 When did you first start having Georgia on your mind? 1.3632 0.03959 223 155 55 13
1065 and after you said get along little doggies, what did they say? 1.3632 0.04158 223 159 47 17
1066 “Let’s start with the discouraging words then we’ll work on the cloudy skies.” 1.3632 0.04203 212 150 47 15
1067 I'm afraid we're going to have to go deeper than an "old cowhand, from the Rio Grande" 1.3632 0.04308 212 152 43 17
1068 If these sessions are going to be useful, you're going to need to tell me everything, including the good, the bad, and the ugly. 1.3632 0.04256 212 151 45 16
1069 It never pays to fret over things 1.3632 0.04475 201 145 39 17
1070 You're a cowboy named Sue. 1.3629 0.04160 237 172 44 21
1071 Find a new girlfriend, get a new truck and go adopt a new dog. 1.3628 0.04259 226 164 42 20
1072 So, is this about your dog, your truck, your wife, or all three? 1.3628 0.04166 226 162 46 18
1073 Too many "Momma's" in your songs, this could take a while... 1.3628 0.04464 215 158 36 21
1074 Yes, I know. Sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.3628 0.03892 215 147 58 10
1075 When we last left off, your wife left and then the dog died... 1.3628 0.04002 215 149 54 12
1076 And what would happen if the lil' doggies DON'T get along? 1.3628 0.04056 215 150 52 13
1077 I can probably help with the broken-heart thing, but it may mean the end of your career. 1.3627 0.04145 204 142 50 12
1078 We covered a lot of ground this afternoon, and now it's time to saddle up. 1.3627 0.04427 193 137 42 14
1079 Remember this is your safe place, and you’ll seldom hear a discouraging word. 1.3627 0.04176 193 133 50 10
1080 So what? Sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.3627 0.04427 193 137 42 14
1081 "So your spurs just aren't jingle jangle jingling like they used to, eh?" 1.3626 0.04270 182 125 48 9
1082 Yes, at two-hundred dollars an hour, it's perfectly fine to sing the cowboy blues. 1.3626 0.03718 262 184 61 17
1083 I can help cure your blues, but you'll never have a hit song again. 1.3624 0.04173 218 155 47 16
1084 So in this dream of yours, what happens after the deer and the antelope play? 1.3623 0.04217 207 146 47 14
1085 Here’s a discouraging word—nuts. 1.3623 0.04486 207 151 37 19
1086 I know it's only been 10 minutes, but I reckon your time is up. 1.3623 0.04381 207 149 41 17
1087 Have you tried crying in your beer? 1.3619 0.04120 210 147 50 13
1088 Why do YOU think you push the little dogies away? 1.3619 0.04283 210 150 44 16
1089 So your girlfriend left you and your dog died; how does that make you feel? 1.3619 0.04283 210 150 44 16
1090 And then what happens? Once you ride off into the sunset? 1.3619 0.04175 210 148 48 14
1091 You're gonna have to face the fact that oh, Susanna is not coming back. 1.3619 0.04439 210 153 38 19
1092 You're making progress. The major key suggests you're getting over your darling Clementine. 1.3618 0.04448 199 143 40 16
1093 ...So Mama LET you grow up this way? 1.3617 0.04569 188 135 38 15
1094 If you sang the blues, I could write you a prescription. 1.3617 0.04443 188 133 42 13
1095 So, are you and Little Doggie getting along now? 1.3617 0.04051 235 168 49 18
1096 Your problem is that you're holding the damn thing backwards. 1.3616 0.04238 224 162 43 19
1097 You're flat. Don't fret. 1.3616 0.04142 224 160 47 17
1098 So you walk into Sardi's and yelled, 'Thank God, I'm a country boy!' and then what happened? 1.3615 0.04080 213 149 51 13
1099 Your girl done left you and your dog done died. Now, tell me about your mother. 1.3615 0.04240 213 152 45 16
1100 The joking is healthy. It's the smoking and midnight toking I worry about. 1.3615 0.03914 213 146 57 10
1101 So tell me how you felt when your parents told you a discouraging word. 1.3614 0.04287 202 143 45 14
1102 So in our last session, you said you met a girl down in the West Texas town of El Paso. Do you care to elaborate? 1.3614 0.04400 202 145 41 16
1103 Don’t fret so much. A year of therapy, and you’ll be singing a different tune. 1.3613 0.03926 238 168 54 16
1104 I think we should explore issues with your pardner. 1.3613 0.04069 191 130 53 8
1105 Can we talk? 1.3612 0.04007 227 160 52 15
1106 I'm guessing in your childhood, you heard a discouraging word more than seldomly. 1.3612 0.04056 227 161 50 16
1107 And is this “blood on the saddle” real or metaphorical? 1.3611 0.04249 216 155 44 17
1108 My fees are $ 200 an hour, 15% royalties for songs where my advice shows up as lyrics, and one depressing song named after me. 1.3611 0.04146 216 153 48 15
1109 You can break character now, Bradley. The Oscars were a month ago. 1.3610 0.04186 205 144 48 13
1110 For the next verse, why don't you try having your wife and truck come back? 1.3610 0.04463 205 149 38 18
1111 I recommend that you see a cardiologist about the achy breaky heart. 1.3610 0.04409 205 148 40 17
1112 You're problem is that should be a C major chord. 1.3609 0.04018 230 163 51 16
1113 You have to accept this song isn't really about a truck. 1.3609 0.04158 230 166 45 19
1114 Woulda, shoulda, coulda! Come on cowboy, this ain't your first rodeo. 1.3608 0.04408 194 138 42 14
1115 As a first step, try to get in tune with your feelings. 1.3606 0.04520 208 153 35 20
1116 So why don't you start by telling me what it is you are fretting about? 1.3602 0.04726 186 136 33 17
1117 Picking up from last week, did you come up with a rhyme for 'decapitate'? 1.3602 0.04538 186 133 39 14
1118 Have you tried talking to her? 1.3602 0.04158 211 149 48 14
1119 And after your wife left, what happened to the dog? 1.3602 0.03807 236 164 59 13
1120 Sir, I think you have A major anxiety. 1.3602 0.04169 236 172 43 21
1121 Let's talk more about your mother not wanting you to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3598 0.03957 239 170 52 17
1122 This is supposed to be talk therapy. 1.3598 0.04064 214 150 51 13
1123 What else do you think those boots were made for? 1.3598 0.03899 214 147 57 10
1124 This relationship you have with your horse....would you call it a normal relationship? 1.3596 0.04041 228 162 50 16
1125 So how’d you react when your mother signed you up for ballet lessons. 1.3596 0.04088 228 163 48 17
1126 OK, OK … die with them on if you must, but take the damn things off my couch right now or this session is over! 1.3596 0.04212 203 143 47 13
1127 A discouraging word may have been seldom on the range, but here in the city we use them as frequently as possible. 1.3594 0.04283 217 157 42 18
1128 How did it make you feel that your mama didn't want to let you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3594 0.04130 217 154 48 15
1129 I can help---but it takes a long time and the chord has to want to change. 1.3593 0.04051 231 165 49 17
1130 I'd feel more comfortable if you put your chaps back on. 1.3593 0.04143 231 167 45 19
1131 When did you last see your darling Clementine? 1.3592 0.03936 206 141 56 9
1132 Do the deer and the antelope cause less, the same, or more anxiety compared to last week? 1.3591 0.03829 220 151 59 10
1133 Singing On Top Of Old Smokey and Down In The Valley does not make you a Bipolar Cowboy. 1.3591 0.04478 220 164 33 23
1134 I’m prescribing C major. 1.3590 0.04193 234 171 42 21
1135 You've made progress on your wife leaving you, but still haven't come to terms with the death of your dog. 1.3590 0.04059 234 168 48 18
1136 After you lost your wife, horse, and dog, then what happened? 1.3590 0.03730 234 161 62 11
1137 And what is it about the tumbling tumbleweeds that gives you this sense of freedom? 1.3589 0.04072 209 146 51 12
1138 Perhaps you put the banjo on your knee to subconsciously drive Susanna away. 1.3587 0.04294 223 163 40 20
1139 And did the poor lonesome cowboy have a mother? 1.3587 0.04294 223 163 40 20
1140 Do you think your problem is that you're playing a right-handed guitar with your left hand? 1.3587 0.04247 223 162 42 19
1141 Tell me in three chords about your childhood. 1.3587 0.03952 223 156 54 13
1142 So who do you think done whom wrong? 1.3585 0.04142 212 150 48 14
1143 Tell me again about your wife leaving you, but this time, try it in G major. 1.3584 0.04015 226 160 51 15
1144 Your dog drank the whisky AND left you? Well, that is pretty harsh. 1.3584 0.04112 226 162 47 17
1145 I know you're lonesome, but that's what got you the record deal. 1.3584 0.03916 226 158 55 13
1146 I’m sorry but we will have to wrap this up. My high noon is here. 1.3582 0.04179 201 141 48 12
1147 But at home, you seldom heard a discouraging word? 1.3582 0.04467 201 146 38 17
1148 So you were 'home, home and deranged...And seldom was heard an encouraging word'? 1.3582 0.04238 201 142 46 13
1149 If you stick to instrumentals we're not going to make any progress. 1.3582 0.04238 201 142 46 13
1150 you have the lonesome cowboy blues 1.3581 0.04409 215 158 37 20
1151 So, your wife left you, your best friend stole your horse, the neighbor shot your dog. And you have two more verses? I'll clear my calendar. 1.3581 0.04207 215 154 45 16
1152 And was this the first time you recall feeling out of tune? 1.3581 0.03881 229 160 56 13
1153 When the antelope play and leave you out ... how does that make you feel? 1.3579 0.04404 190 135 42 13
1154 You seem sad and lonely. Have you considered switching to banjo? 1.3578 0.04216 218 157 44 17
1155 Of coarse you're depressed..most left handed guitar players are 1.3578 0.04315 218 159 40 19
1156 Maybe it would be best for you to forget the Alamo 1.3578 0.03943 232 164 53 15
1157 So your truck broke and your girlfriend ran off. Get over it. 1.3575 0.04539 193 140 37 16
1158 How long have you had this fear of losing your wife, your dog and your pickup truck? 1.3575 0.04153 207 146 48 13
1159 That's "on the range," not "I'm deranged." Look it up. 1.3575 0.04209 207 147 46 14
1160 Maybe if you played in a major key you'd be less depressed?... 1.3575 0.04224 221 160 43 18
1161 Am I to understand that your trauma began when the deer and the antelope refused to play? 1.3575 0.04175 221 159 45 17
1162 Let’s assume she had wnted you to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3575 0.04076 221 157 49 15
1163 Life's no rodeo, Doc. 1.3575 0.03973 221 155 53 13
1164 Now, did things begin to go south with your wife, before or after your dog died? 1.3574 0.03814 235 164 58 13
1165 So Western Medicine hasn’t been working for you? 1.3571 0.04009 238 171 49 18
1166 Why did you change your tune when you started singing about your mother? 1.3571 0.04325 224 165 38 21
1167 And when did the range stop feeling like home? 1.3571 0.04221 210 150 45 15
1168 Sir, we spoke about this once before. Hank Williams and lithium are a toxic combination. I’m switching you back to bourbon. 1.3571 0.04278 224 164 40 20
1169 But how seldom was heard an encouraging word? 1.3571 0.04139 238 174 43 21
1170 I see, and what were the deer and the antelope doing while they played? 1.3571 0.04275 210 151 43 16
1171 Try it once more from the top - this time with feeling. 1.3571 0.04087 224 160 48 16
1172 Those discouraging words, however seldom, might well have contributed to your issues... 1.3568 0.04049 227 162 49 16
1173 Ok, you don't have to start at the beginning this time, but take me back to that second bridge. 1.3568 0.03951 227 160 53 14
1174 Don't fret about it. 1.3568 0.03906 213 147 56 10
1175 Shall we discuss the drinkin', the cheatin' or your Momma? 1.3568 0.04232 213 153 44 16
1176 And when did this lonesome feeling first come over you ? 1.3568 0.04126 213 151 48 14
1177 And how often do you see these rings of fire? 1.3565 0.04086 216 153 49 14
1178 You’ll seldom hear discouraging words here either 1.3564 0.04392 202 146 40 16
1179 It certainly looks like a case of the blues. 1.3564 0.04370 188 133 43 12
1180 ...looks like we’re out of time. Might I suggest you tune up before our next session. 1.3562 0.04200 219 158 44 17
1181 What do you think it is about bond trading that leaves you feeling this way? 1.3562 0.04150 219 157 46 16
1182 So you became neurotically conflicted when she took her love to town? 1.3561 0.04062 205 143 51 11
1183 Can you tell me why you think "seldom" is a discouraging word? 1.3559 0.04351 222 164 37 21
1184 So.., your guitar ain't got strings and your gun doesn't shoot. And your life stinks And so do your boots?". "I don't think you need a psychiatrist, I think you need an agent" 1.3559 0.04060 222 158 49 15
1185 Let’s start with when you ‘accidentally’ voted forTrump. 1.3558 0.04408 208 152 38 18
1186 Maybe you'd be happier if you didn't play shitty music like that. 1.3558 0.04512 208 154 34 20
1187 Slowly, in 3/4 time, tell me about your mother. 1.3558 0.04137 208 147 48 13
1188 Didn't your Mama warn you about growing up to be a cowboy? 1.3558 0.04408 208 152 38 18
1189 Just because you're a cowboy doesn't mean you have to be lonesome. 1.3556 0.03923 225 158 54 13
1190 So your Mother didn't want her baby to grow up and be a cowboy. 1.3555 0.04041 211 148 51 12
1191 And how did it make you feel when the lil doggies did not get along? 1.3553 0.04352 197 141 42 14
1192 I’d like you to imagine a world with deodorant. 1.3553 0.04584 197 145 34 18
1193 How old was Sue when he told you he wanted a gender reassignment? 1.3553 0.03986 228 162 51 15
1194 Now some discouraging words. The skies are sometimes cloudy all day. 1.3553 0.04034 228 163 49 16
1195 How does it make you feel that other mommas don't let their babies grow up to be cowboys 1.3551 0.04267 214 155 42 17
1196 Your home on the range sounds nice, but let's focus on that part about discouraging words and cloudy skies. 1.3550 0.03997 231 165 50 16
1197 You've got the "mental health isn't adequately covered by your insurance provider" blues. 1.3550 0.04136 231 168 44 19
1198 Have you ever told your low-down pa and good-for-nothin' ma how you really feel? 1.3548 0.03965 217 152 53 12
1199 Yes, your lyrics are original but many of my clients sing the same tune. 1.3548 0.04018 217 153 51 13
1200 As long as you recognize it's a temporary coping mechanism, give yourself license to use discouraging words more than seldom. 1.3547 0.04374 203 147 40 16
1201 As I said last week, you've got to know when to hold'em, know when to walk away... 1.3545 0.04184 220 159 44 17
1202 What seems to be the treble? 1.3544 0.03926 237 169 52 16
1203 You say your wife and your dog left you on the same day your truck broke down? 1.3544 0.04274 206 148 43 15
1204 And how does that make y'all feel? 1.3543 0.04095 223 160 47 16
1205 We're out of 3/4 time. Let's pick this up next week. 1.3543 0.04045 223 159 49 15
1206 I'm less interested in the deer and the antelope than I am in your mother. 1.3543 0.04240 223 163 41 19
1207 And, in this fantasy, when do the cows finally come home? 1.3543 0.04045 223 159 49 15
1208 When you come back next week I want to hear a sad song with a happy ending. 1.3543 0.03995 223 158 51 14
1209 So, in your grief, you turned to Clementine’s little sister. Do you think that was appropriate? 1.3541 0.04391 209 153 38 18
1210 How long have you felt your Mama didn’t want you to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3541 0.03949 209 145 54 10
1211 You don't have to rhyme. Just tell me how you feel. 1.3541 0.04064 209 147 50 12
1212 It's nothing to fret over...you just have to learn to cut the chord. 1.3540 0.04152 226 164 44 18
1213 And how did you feel about your mother not wanting you to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3540 0.04008 226 161 50 15
1214 I can´t help but wonder, Vern, whether *you´re* the little dogie. 1.3538 0.04440 195 141 39 15
1215 Why do you think the deer and the antelope wouldn't play? 1.3538 0.04320 195 139 43 13
1216 That's all the time we have, next week we'll work in C major. 1.3538 0.03725 260 185 58 17
1217 In our next session, I'd like to focus more on the grinnin', and less on the pickin'. 1.3538 0.04080 212 150 49 13
1218 Well, like we've said before, Tex, sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.3538 0.04241 212 153 43 16
1219 It started with a boy, named Sue! 1.3537 0.04114 229 166 45 18
1220 So when we left off you were down in Laredo and one of your colleagues was dying in the street. Thoughts? Feelings? 1.3537 0.04206 229 168 41 20
1221 That's not what I meant by "sliding scale." 1.3535 0.04199 215 155 44 16
1222 Maybe just choose one - country OR western? 1.3532 0.04055 218 155 49 14
1223 I hear booze, horses, dogs, guns, cops, injuns, girlfriends in your song, but your parents, no? 1.3532 0.04405 218 162 35 21
1224 No, I don’t know anything that rhymes with ‘personality disorder’ 1.3532 0.04055 218 155 49 14
1225 Maybe city life isn't for everybody. 1.3532 0.03854 235 166 55 14
1226 Talk a little more about your spurs, that jingle jangle jingle. 1.3532 0.03759 235 164 59 12
1227 And the skies are not cloudy all day? 1.3529 0.04300 204 147 42 15
1228 I don't get it. You told me you seldom heard a discouraging word. 1.3529 0.03861 221 154 56 11
1229 Tell me again about your mother, your dog, and your truck... in E minor this time. 1.3529 0.03914 221 155 54 12
1230 On a scale of one to ten, how 'downright lonesome ' are you feeling today? 1.3529 0.04129 204 144 48 12
1231 Your super-ego may be saying "no," but your id is clearly screaming YEE HAW. 1.3527 0.03980 224 159 51 14
1232 You can choose not to be lonesome. 1.3527 0.04030 224 160 49 15
1233 Pardner, instead of a ballad, how 'bout you rustle me up a payment? 1.3527 0.04365 207 151 39 17
1234 And when did you first experience this uncontrollable urge to play Bach? 1.3527 0.04726 207 158 25 24
1235 OK. You’ve suffered an unfaithful wife, too much cheap whiskey, and an old pick-up truck that never runs. How does that make you feel . . . in the key of G, please. 1.3524 0.04090 227 164 46 17
1236 So your doggies won’t get along? 1.3524 0.04476 210 156 34 20
1237 I think it's time to start singing a different tune. 1.3524 0.04214 210 151 44 15
1238 This is what I'm hearing, Sam: "You didn't tell your honey, and you didn't tell your kid. You saddled up your ego and you rode into your id, ohhh you rode into your id." Is that about right? 1.3523 0.04409 193 139 40 14
1239 Let’s move on from the truck and get back to the dog. 1.3523 0.04348 193 138 42 13
1240 To make any further progress, you'll have to change your tune. 1.3521 0.04064 213 151 49 13
1241 What do you mean, this office is too small for the two of us? 1.3521 0.04118 213 152 47 14
1242 And how long have you and Lucille been having these problems? 1.3521 0.04118 213 152 47 14
1243 So, I now know all about how your dog died, that your truck broke down and that your woman left you! Can you now sing a little about you? 1.3521 0.04118 213 152 47 14
1244 I liked it better when you had the blues. 1.3520 0.04538 196 144 35 17
1245 There’s a reason they call you Billy the Id. 1.3519 0.03728 233 162 60 11
1246 Your fifteen minutes of fame ended thirty five minutes ago. 1.3519 0.04384 216 160 36 20
1247 Wait…your DOG stole your truck? 1.3519 0.04234 216 157 42 17
1248 On the couch again, I just can't wait to get on the couch again. 1.3518 0.04374 199 144 40 15
1249 You know Doc, sometimes a ge-tar is just a ge-tar. 1.3518 0.04431 199 145 38 16
1250 Just the verse about Momma again, please. 1.3516 0.04193 219 159 43 17
1251 And this is why your mama shouldn't have let her baby grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3516 0.03988 219 155 51 13
1252 One should not need to feel guilty for picturing a deer and an antelope playing together. 1.3515 0.04153 202 143 47 12
1253 One more time, with feelings. 1.3514 0.04604 185 135 35 15
1254 I would say your diagnosis is OCD: Old Cowboy Disorder. 1.3512 0.04283 205 148 42 15
1255 I'm sorry, but 'Ramblin' Man' is not a psychiatric diagnosis. 1.3511 0.04065 225 162 47 16
1256 Let's talk about your avoidance of discouraging words 1.3511 0.03966 225 160 51 14
1257 Urban cowboy" is not an official disorder. Yet 1.3510 0.03956 208 145 53 10
1258 Can you describe your problem in two verses or less? 1.3509 0.03930 228 162 52 14
1259 Sometimes a cattle drive is just a cattle drive. 1.3509 0.03979 228 163 50 15
1260 So when did your heart become achy breaky? 1.3508 0.04248 191 135 45 11
1261 When we left off last week, you were about to tell me how you're coping without Clementine. 1.3507 0.04088 211 150 48 13
1262 If you’re singing about major depression, it’s easier to take in a minor key. 1.3507 0.04143 211 151 46 14
1263 And when did you first realize you were becoming a cliche? 1.3507 0.04143 211 151 46 14
1264 Well, maybe those little dogies would git along if you were more assertive. 1.3505 0.03994 214 151 51 12
1265 Start again from the top. 1.3505 0.04260 214 156 41 17
1266 I know it's not what you want to hear, Earl, but if you're going to play in Texas, you need to have a fiddle in the band. 1.3505 0.04049 214 152 49 13
1267 How lonesome is the prairie? 1.3504 0.04001 234 169 48 17
1268 I think the 'Mothers, don't let your sons' line may have significance." 1.3503 0.04283 197 141 43 13
1269 Sure I’m on the range, but am I ever really home? 1.3502 0.04167 217 157 44 16
1270 You seem a bit high strung today. 1.3502 0.03902 217 152 54 11
1271 Be patient. It takes a while to get over the death of a pickup truck. 1.3500 0.04076 220 158 47 15
1272 The good news is that you don't have pianist envy. 1.3500 0.04413 200 146 38 16
1273 Yes, I see. Tell me more about the deer and the antelope. 1.3500 0.04297 200 144 42 14
1274 You appear to be out of tune with your feelings. 1.3500 0.04179 200 142 46 12
1275 How did you feel when you found out that Old McDonald didn’t really have a farm? 1.3500 0.04179 200 142 46 12
1276 Yes I can help but nobody will buy songs about a wife coming back, the dog living and the train not hitting. 1.3500 0.04025 220 157 49 14
1277 In your home you heard more than a few discouraging words? 1.3500 0.03920 220 155 53 12
1278 I understand you don't want to be fenced in. How do you feel about walls? 1.3500 0.03795 240 170 56 14
1279 No, you'd be surprised, I see a great number of accountants who see themselves as "Singing Cowboys." 1.3500 0.03758 220 152 59 9
1280 Why is it so important to you that the little dogies get along? 1.3498 0.03882 263 193 48 22
1281 Sounds like you had a happy home on the range. 1.3498 0.04038 223 160 48 15
1282 If you are going to tell me your problems in a song, I am going to finish the bottle of vodka on the shelf behind me 1.3495 0.04429 206 152 36 18
1283 Just to watch him die may only have been a secondary motivation. Let's try to dig a bit deeper 1.3495 0.04265 206 149 42 15
1284 What I hear in that song are a need to conform to masculine norms and strong symptoms of depression. 1.3493 0.04330 209 153 39 17
1285 Just TELL me how you feel! 1.3493 0.04222 209 151 43 15
1286 I'm going to prescribe a course of singing lessons. 1.3492 0.04469 189 137 38 14
1287 Now tell me everything! No strings attached. 1.3491 0.04114 232 170 43 19
1288 Could you please elaborate on what you mean by 'seldom is heard a discouraging word'. 1.3491 0.04127 212 152 46 14
1289 Can you play 'Feelings'? 1.3491 0.04233 212 154 42 16
1290 Your spurs are ruining my couch! 1.3491 0.04072 212 151 48 13
1291 So, you walked out in the streets of Laredo. Then what happened? 1.3491 0.03961 212 149 52 11
1292 Well...it's catchy. However, I caution that "This Wall is Your Wall" presents an inherent, existential, Woody Guthrie meme conflict, exacerbated by heightened copyright infringement exposure. 1.3489 0.04208 235 175 38 22
1293 How does your mother feel about you growing up to be a cowboy? 1.3489 0.03847 235 167 54 14
1294 Why do YOU think the buffalo are roaming? 1.3488 0.04139 215 155 45 15
1295 I am OK with your guitar speaking for you, but tell it to respond to my questions. 1.3488 0.03979 215 152 51 12
1296 I think you’d do better reflecting on the Streets of Libido 1.3486 0.04151 218 158 44 16
1297 And when was it that you first felt fenced in, Butch? 1.3486 0.03664 218 149 62 7
1298 Desperado, why don't you come to your senses? 1.3485 0.03917 241 174 50 17
1299 Well, first, my mama told me not to grow up to be a cowboy... 1.3485 0.04004 241 176 46 19
1300 After months of analysis, I've reached my diagnosis. You have 'The Blues." 1.3485 0.04556 198 147 33 18
1301 I’d appreciate it if you could express your feelings without accompaniment. 1.3485 0.04081 198 139 49 10
1302 It’s time to stop blaming your mother. You chose to be a cowboy. 1.3484 0.04161 221 161 43 17
1303 I think you have to accept that she won't make her home on the range. 1.3484 0.04061 221 159 47 15
1304 Have you considered WHY your Dad looked relieved when he smashed your first guitar? 1.3484 0.04161 221 161 43 17
1305 Don't quit your day job, if you have one. 1.3484 0.04161 221 161 43 17
1306 And how does being born a ramblin' man make you feel? 1.3483 0.04337 201 146 40 15
1307 So tell me, when did you first meet Clementine? 1.3483 0.04221 201 144 44 13
1308 And what else did she tell your achy breaky heart? 1.3482 0.04023 224 161 48 15
1309 What did your Mama want you to grow up to be? 1.3482 0.03807 247 177 54 16
1310 If you knew how to play it, we might get somewhere 1.3480 0.04292 204 148 41 15
1311 Vat does "know vhen to fold them" mean? 1.3480 0.04083 227 165 45 17
1312 Its position suggests a phallic symbol, but its shape suggests something feminine. 1.3480 0.03937 227 162 51 14
1313 I studied at the “I’m OK, you’re OK” corral so this is not my first rodeo. 1.3478 0.04303 207 151 40 16
1314 Did you feel out of tune as a child? 1.3478 0.03950 230 165 50 15
1315 Have you tried more cowbell? 1.3476 0.04259 210 153 41 16
1316 You should practice more before you come next time 1.3476 0.04259 210 153 41 16
1317 So...your mother didn't want her baby to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3474 0.04056 213 152 48 13
1318 It is quite normal to be lonely in the saddle after your horse dies. 1.3474 0.04217 213 155 42 16
1319 Tell me of this 'first rodeo.' 1.3474 0.04320 213 157 38 18
1320 So why do you think your mamma let her baby grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3473 0.04112 239 177 41 21
1321 Can you play 'Crazy'? 1.3473 0.03892 239 172 51 16
1322 How about I take notes while you play them? 1.3472 0.04123 216 156 45 15
1323 Although seldom, how do you feel when you hear a discouraging word? 1.3472 0.04175 216 157 43 16
1324 So, your truck broke down, your wife left you, and your dog died... 1.3470 0.04333 219 163 36 20
1325 So you say you now have exes OUTSIDE of Texas? 1.3470 0.04235 219 161 40 18
1326 No, this ain't my first rodeo. 1.3470 0.04284 219 162 38 19
1327 Upon asking about subject's childhood, seldom is heard a discouraging word. 1.3470 0.04032 219 157 48 14
1328 So they gave you a home where the buffalo roam, and that wasn't enough? 1.3469 0.04292 196 141 42 13
1329 You're just stringing me along, aren't you? 1.3468 0.03995 222 159 49 14
1330 Maybe you should rehearse BEFORE our weekly sessions. 1.3468 0.04096 222 161 45 16
1331 And how did it make you feel when you lost your job, your wife left you and your dog ran away? 1.3467 0.04057 225 163 46 16
1332 Before you launch into another refrain, let me remind you that I bill by the hour. 1.3467 0.03958 225 161 50 14
1333 Git along little doggie. Your time is up. 1.3466 0.03969 251 185 45 21
1334 How 'bout 'Mamas Don't Let Their Babies Grow Up To Be Whiners? 1.3465 0.04376 202 148 38 16
1335 I'm tired of doing this....I'll give you $500 for the guitar and hat! 1.3465 0.04085 202 143 48 11
1336 You are not an "old cowhand from the Rio Grande." You are a wannabe with delusions of grandeur & a drinking problem. 1.3465 0.04431 228 174 29 25
1337 How does it feel when the little dogie doesn't get along? 1.3465 0.04115 228 167 43 18
1338 And what do you think? Is freedom just another name for nothin' left to lose? 1.3463 0.04385 205 151 37 17
1339 You can skip the refrains. 1.3463 0.03924 205 143 53 9
1340 The problem isn't with your love-life; it's your nasally voice and poor intonation. 1.3463 0.04439 205 152 35 18
1341 Yes, I know you paid your dues, but our time is still up! 1.3463 0.04030 231 168 46 17
1342 How long have you been lonesome? 1.3462 0.03948 234 169 49 16
1343 And how do those discouraging words make you feel? 1.3462 0.03806 234 166 55 13
1344 So what I’m hearing is that you don’t feel at Home on the Range. 1.3462 0.03888 208 145 54 9
1345 You have C.D.D cattle deficit disorder. I'm going to write you a prescription for steeroids. 1.3460 0.03773 237 168 56 13
1346 This week you can sing about anything but your dog, your pickup truck and your horse. 1.3460 0.03958 237 172 48 17
1347 Relax. You're too high strung. 1.3460 0.04295 211 155 39 17
1348 Do you know "How Can I Miss You When You Won't Go Away? 1.3460 0.04189 211 153 43 15
1349 OK. So your wife left you; the dog died; and your truck broke down. How does that make you feel? 1.3458 0.04252 214 157 40 17
1350 This might not be your first rodeo, Mr. Cassidy, but for $150 an hour, I suggest we get down to business. 1.3458 0.03986 214 152 50 12
1351 Yes, those are your words, but let's talk about the underlying tones. 1.3455 0.04106 191 134 48 9
1352 If you play 'feelings' one more time I'm gonna end this session. 1.3455 0.04788 191 145 26 20
1353 I can't really tell you why your guitar is high-strung. 1.3455 0.03899 246 179 49 18
1354 Sorry, "Lonesome Cowboy" is not a Jungian Archetype. 1.3454 0.04194 194 138 45 11
1355 What happened after you left her for Jolene? 1.3454 0.04065 194 136 49 9
1356 Sing some more about your little dogie. 1.3453 0.04030 223 161 47 15
1357 Just to clarify...are you singing about your horse or you partner? 1.3453 0.04226 223 165 39 19
1358 So when did your dogies stop getting along? 1.3453 0.03929 223 159 51 13
1359 Yes, yes, I get that you're lonesome, let's move on. 1.3451 0.04138 226 166 42 18
1360 In your case, your mother was right. No shoes on the couch, please. 1.3451 0.04090 226 165 44 17
1361 Have you tried just singing happier songs to see how that feels? 1.3451 0.04042 226 164 46 16
1362 And how did it make you feel when the little dogies wouldn’t git along? 1.3451 0.03944 226 162 50 14
1363 So you never actually felt at home on the range?" - Tory Hoen, Brooklyn, N 1.3451 0.03842 255 186 50 19
1364 and the sky’s are not cloudy all day... Interesting... 1.3450 0.04170 200 143 45 12
1365 Did you lose your musical talent before or after you lost your dog, your horse, and your wife? 1.3450 0.04053 229 167 45 17
1366 So you left Cheyanne and were off to Montan, after which you said good-bye to someone you called 'Old Paint'. Tell me, did your mother wear a lot of makeup? 1.3450 0.04053 229 167 45 17
1367 You see, the deer and the antelope don't get along and a discouraging word is heard more often then you think 1.3448 0.03874 232 166 52 14
1368 You here for your weekly tune up? 1.3447 0.04421 206 153 35 18
1369 As Freud said "Know when to hold em." 1.3445 0.03944 238 173 48 17
1370 Play me that one about your mother again. 1.3445 0.03853 238 171 52 15
1371 So long have you been feeling so lonesome you could cry? 1.3445 0.04047 209 149 48 12
1372 Let's strum back a few bars to your wild, lawless years. 1.3444 0.04338 180 128 42 10
1373 No, singing the blues is not the same as venting your feelings. 1.3443 0.04118 212 153 45 14
1374 Yes, buffalo, deer and antelope...but how do YOU feel when the sky IS cloudy all day? 1.3442 0.04184 215 157 42 16
1375 It's your fifty minutes. Discouraging words are okay in here, and yes, the skies really can be cloudy all day. 1.3442 0.04131 215 156 44 15
1376 So, who exactly fenced you in ? 1.3442 0.04184 215 157 42 16
1377 It's a perfectly natural thing to fear, but we all have to eventually come to the end of the trail. 1.3442 0.04025 215 154 48 13
1378 Next week,we'll pick it up from the bridge. 1.3442 0.04131 215 156 44 15
1379 No, I don't think hearing a couple of verses of 'All My Ex's Live in Texas' would be helpful. 1.3440 0.04092 218 158 45 15
1380 I'm just messing with you Doc. I didn't really shoot a man in Reno just to watch him die. 1.3440 0.04040 218 157 47 14
1381 I gather from this that you have a phobia of being fenced in. 1.3440 0.03825 218 153 55 10
1382 You don't need to respond to each question with a song. 1.3439 0.03950 221 158 50 13
1383 Tell me more about this discouraging word. 1.3438 0.04065 224 163 45 16
1384 That's quite a collection of discouraging words. I guess you've been saving them a while. 1.3438 0.04162 224 165 41 18
1385 You talk a lot about being wanted, but what about feeling wanted? 1.3438 0.04015 224 162 47 15
1386 There are no “discouraging words.” 1.3438 0.04065 224 163 45 16
1387 What makes you think the cow doesn't love you back? 1.3438 0.04210 224 166 39 19
1388 So, your momma let you grew up to be a cowboy? 1.3436 0.03829 227 161 54 12
1389 Even Freud said, "Sometimes a guitar is just a guitar." 1.3436 0.03879 227 162 52 13
1390 More Woody. Less Merle. 1.3436 0.03829 227 161 54 12
1391 And, in my dream, she's driving six BLACK horses 'round the mountain.... 1.3436 0.03829 227 161 54 12
1392 I’ve heard enough. 1.3436 0.03829 227 161 54 12
1393 So you blame your Momma for not making you be a doctor or lawyer and such. 1.3435 0.03942 230 166 49 15
1394 Sometimes a song is just a song. 1.3435 0.04084 230 169 43 18
1395 Jimmy Crack corn and I don’t care?” You really have to start showing interest in others if you want to make progress 1.3435 0.03990 230 167 47 16
1396 So she never wanted you to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3435 0.04176 230 171 39 20
1397 Tell me more about these discouraging words you have been hearing. 1.3433 0.03954 233 169 48 16
1398 Why do you think you killed that man in Reno? 1.3433 0.03812 233 166 54 13
1399 You’ll change your tune when the Democrats take back the Senate. 1.3433 0.04328 201 147 39 15
1400 Sometimes a C chord is just a C chord. 1.3433 0.04385 201 148 37 16
1401 ... and when did you first realize your li'l doggee just couldn't git along? 1.3433 0.04092 201 143 47 11
1402 Let's work on changing your tune. 1.3433 0.04152 201 144 45 12
1403 If I played your stuff, I'd see me too. 1.3431 0.04395 204 151 36 17
1404 Your horse died, your dog ran away, your girl left you for another feller... no wonder you’re depressed. 1.3431 0.04339 204 150 38 16
1405 Are the lyrics: “She slept with my brother Ward, so I hit her with my Ford,” literal or metaphorical? 1.3431 0.04227 204 148 42 14
1406 How long have you been an investment banker? 1.3431 0.04169 204 147 44 13
1407 Your life would improve if you knew more than 3 chords. 1.3431 0.04052 204 145 48 11
1408 So, your gal, she done left you. And your dog died. 1.3431 0.04062 239 177 42 20
1409 Yes, Senator Cruz, Texans still think of you as a foreigner. 1.3431 0.03975 239 175 46 18
1410 Get your mind out of the guitar. 1.3430 0.04184 207 150 43 14
1411 Have you considered that your lonesomeness may be a result of your inaccurately curated social media persona? 1.3430 0.04070 207 148 47 12
1412 There was blood on the saddle? I'll refer you to a proctologist instead. 1.3430 0.04508 207 156 31 20
1413 Anything else you remember about the first verse? 1.3429 0.04251 210 154 40 16
1414 Have you tried bottling up your emotions instead? 1.3429 0.04460 210 158 32 20
1415 I keep hearing the same old tune from you. 1.3429 0.04087 210 151 46 13
1416 I don't think I can help you. This IS my first rodeo. 1.3427 0.04048 213 153 47 13
1417 And why were you, a boy, named Sue? 1.3426 0.03788 216 151 56 9
1418 Do you realize that song is full of discouraging words? 1.3426 0.04115 216 157 44 15
1419 And your horse left you when? 1.3426 0.04063 216 156 46 14
1420 Okay. You lost your dog, your truck and your woman. How does that make you feel? 1.3426 0.04063 216 156 46 14
1421 Your truck, your dog and your woman all in one day? Hmmm....I’ve heard worse. 1.3426 0.04063 216 156 46 14
1422 Why so certain that the misfortune of the little dogies is none of your own? 1.3425 0.04024 219 158 47 14
1423 About how long has it been since you felt at home on the range? 1.3423 0.03935 222 159 50 13
1424 These chronic lonesome feelings are quite common for people in your profession. 1.3423 0.03722 222 155 58 9
1425 I’m so lonesome I could cry too...but I’m not singing about i 1.3423 0.03935 222 159 50 13
1426 On the outside people see cowboy but on the inside I have always felt like an indian. 1.3422 0.03900 225 161 51 13
1427 It is perfectly normal. In college many boys experiment with reggae riffs. 1.3422 0.03900 225 161 51 13
1428 And then all I heard were discouraging words 1.3422 0.04241 225 168 37 20
1429 These feelings are not uncommon, but there are plenty of women who would be satisfied with just an 8-gallon hat. 1.3421 0.03964 228 165 48 15
1430 So, after your wife ran off with your no-account brother, how long was it till the dump truck ran over your dog? 1.3420 0.04452 193 142 36 15
1431 Let’s see. Your dog died, your wife left you and your pickup was stolen. That about it? 1.3419 0.04078 234 173 42 19
1432 What happened to the tuxedo and cello? 1.3418 0.04221 196 141 43 12
1433 Let's see, your Daddy left you at age 3 and named you Sue. So what brings you here? 1.3418 0.04520 196 146 33 17
1434 So you wandered the desert on a horse with no name and still can't come up with a name. 1.3417 0.04414 199 147 36 16
1435 So, this man in Reno that you shot? Tell me more about him. 1.3417 0.04414 199 147 36 16
1436 ...so give me a home where the ‘bison’ roam? I think I see the problem. 1.3417 0.03734 240 171 56 13
1437 Let’s discuss how your day went and a 1 and a 2... 1.3416 0.04194 202 146 43 13
1438 Okay, so tell me more about this hitch in your giddy-up? 1.3416 0.04367 202 149 37 16
1439 Shall I assume that "Git along Little Doggie" is cowboy code for " I don't want to talk about my mother?" 1.3416 0.04587 202 153 29 20
1440 You may have lost your dog, your horse and your woman, but you still have to pay me. 1.3416 0.04054 243 181 41 21
1441 And do you think the little doggies resented your telling them to git along? 1.3416 0.03703 243 173 57 13
1442 So you keep hearing a discouraging word and the skies are cloudy all day. 1.3415 0.04537 205 155 30 20
1443 Have you tried playing right-handed? 1.3415 0.04152 205 148 44 13
1444 And how long would you say you've had these lovesick, lonesome blues? 1.3415 0.04266 205 150 40 15
1445 When did you realize the "cold,cold heart" might be yours? 1.3415 0.04152 205 148 44 13
1446 Are you sure there weren't more complex motivations than "Just to watch him die"? 1.3415 0.04209 205 149 42 14
1447 Let’s focus on the 10-gallon half-full. 1.3414 0.03508 249 174 65 10
1448 I'm a bit concerned that you're still feeling so lonesome you could cry. 1.3413 0.03996 208 148 49 11
1449 So your mama didn't want you to grow up and be a cowboy. How does that make you feel? 1.3413 0.04111 208 150 45 13
1450 If that's the way you want it, I'll start singing the questions." 1.3413 0.04054 208 149 47 12
1451 Looks like our time is up for today. Now, git along, li'l doggie. 1.3413 0.03938 208 147 51 10
1452 Do you believe your father intended his words to be discouraging? 1.3412 0.03958 211 150 50 11
1453 Let's revisit that second verse. 1.3412 0.03843 211 148 54 9
1454 Recognizing you've got the blues is the first step toward overcoming them. 1.3412 0.04180 211 154 42 15
1455 Just three chords and the truth, please. 1.3412 0.03836 255 187 49 19
1456 When you speak of your truck, do you mean your mother? 1.3411 0.04032 214 154 47 13
1457 But WHY do you think you're a lonesome cowboy? 1.3410 0.03994 217 156 48 13
1458 Without lyrics, my diagnosis may be a bit speculative. 1.3410 0.04099 217 158 44 15
1459 Let's start where we left off last week. You were at home on the range and you heard a discouraging word. How did the make you feel about yourself? 1.3410 0.04099 217 158 44 15
1460 I sense a resentment towards your Mother, for letting you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3410 0.03830 217 153 54 10
1461 Sometimes a hat is just a hat. 1.3409 0.04009 220 159 47 14
1462 You've got pluck. 1.3409 0.04009 220 159 47 14
1463 I'll make note of that. 1.3408 0.03763 223 157 56 10
1464 Our sessions would be more effective if you used your words. 1.3407 0.03834 226 161 53 12
1465 One yodel, and we're through. 1.3407 0.04034 226 165 45 16
1466 Yes, but what do you suppose the root of this achy-ness and/or breaky-ness is? 1.3406 0.03997 229 167 46 16
1467 If I hear you, you're so lonesome you could cry 1.3405 0.04008 232 170 45 17
1468 My wife's still with me, my dogs alive and I haven't crashed my truck in years. 1.3403 0.03846 238 172 51 15
1469 So, in your dream, as you walked out in the streets of Laredo, you spied a young cowpoke. Tell me, did he look like your mother? 1.3403 0.04070 238 177 41 20
1470 Let me see if I got the refrain right... “It can happen to you, if you’re Jung at heart”. 1.3403 0.03937 238 174 47 17
1471 I'm referring you to a musicologist. 1.3402 0.04247 194 140 42 12
1472 Tell me more about the streets of Laredo. 1.3401 0.04014 197 139 49 9
1473 So tell me when you first noticed your girlfriend left you, took your dog, and stole your truck. 1.3401 0.04325 197 144 39 14
1474 So, when you are lonesome, and could cry, how else do you feel? 1.3401 0.04443 197 146 35 16
1475 My advice to you is: Hit the road Jack and don't you come back! 1.3401 0.03963 247 183 44 20
1476 Okay, but now go back a few bars. 1.3400 0.04099 200 143 46 11
1477 It's seldom I hear a discouraging word in your lyrics. What's wrong? 1.3399 0.04177 203 147 43 13
1478 And how long have you been seeing these ghost riders in the sky? 1.3398 0.03618 256 183 59 14
1479 Your heart is broken, you drink whiskey, and you drive a pickup truck - is there anything else I should know? 1.3397 0.04260 209 154 39 16
1480 You seem a little flat. I'm writing you a quarter rest and crescendo until next time. 1.3397 0.04205 209 153 41 15
1481 You say you grew up when seldom was heard a discouraging word. 1.3397 0.04313 209 155 37 17
1482 So, your wife left you, the bank repossessed your truck, and then your dog died. How did that make you feel?" 1.3397 0.04260 209 154 39 16
1483 Singing the same sad song isn't progress. 1.3397 0.04260 209 154 39 16
1484 I'm sorry sir, but the "honky tonk blues" are not in the DSM. 1.3397 0.04094 209 151 45 13
1485 Go back to when you were a young cowhand, before you got to the Rio Grande. 1.3396 0.03828 212 149 54 9
1486 It seems we've both struck a chord. 1.3396 0.03999 212 152 48 12
1487 And WHY were you drunk the day your mom got out of prison? 1.3396 0.04164 212 155 42 15
1488 Let's just go with that - sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.3395 0.04123 215 157 43 15
1489 OK. Tell me about your dogie. 1.3394 0.03979 218 157 48 13
1490 And the fact that the guitar is shaped like your mother...? 1.3394 0.04135 218 160 42 16
1491 Our time is up little dogie. 1.3394 0.04095 221 162 43 16
1492 Let’s talk about your achy-breaky heart 1.3394 0.03942 221 159 49 13
1493 And how does that transition from major to minor really make you feel? 1.3393 0.04007 224 163 46 15
1494 Look, it's your hour, but if I were you, I'd skip the chorus and just share your feelings with me about this Clementine of yours. 1.3393 0.04154 224 166 40 18
1495 So, you say that "the range" is the only place where you feel at home. 1.3392 0.03871 227 163 51 13
1496 Why do you think the deer and the antelope play? 1.3392 0.03971 227 165 47 15
1497 If you want me to help you heal, you’ll have to stop picking at that. 1.3391 0.03994 233 171 45 17
1498 A lonesome whistle blowin'... And what was your second memory? 1.3390 0.03625 236 166 60 10
1499 Let me get this straight, your wife left you, your dog ran away, and your truck was repossessed? You're ready to be a country star. 1.3389 0.03832 239 173 51 15
1500 Why are you obsessed with the deer and antelope playing? 1.3388 0.03800 242 175 52 15
1501 Not just bipolar, more like yippee high, yippee low. 1.3388 0.03856 245 179 49 17
1502 So you say they're building a wall "where the buffalo roam?" 1.3385 0.04700 192 146 27 19
1503 So, when did you start feeling this compulsion to play jazz? 1.3382 0.04274 204 150 39 15
1504 Do you feel that all trails are lonesome? 1.3382 0.03944 207 147 50 10
1505 Let's see. . . your dog, pick-up truck and mother. Let's focus on your mother. 1.3382 0.03944 207 147 50 10
1506 Cry me a river. 1.3381 0.04401 210 158 33 19
1507 And how did losing your momma, your dog and your pickup truck make you feel? 1.3381 0.04078 210 152 45 13
1508 Maybe if you hadn't gotten a fucking worthless music degree you would be able to support your wife and kids and she wouldn't have left you. Did you ever think about that? 1.3381 0.04401 210 158 33 19
1509 And you say your girlfriend prefers the strings unattached? 1.3381 0.04022 210 151 47 12
1510 So when did you discover you were a Jewish cowboy? 1.3380 0.04093 213 155 44 14
1511 When, exactly, did you stop feeling at home, home on the range? 1.3380 0.03871 213 151 52 10
1512 Beautiful lyrics, but now I'm depressed. 1.3380 0.04200 213 157 40 16
1513 ...and that is string theory. 1.3380 0.04159 216 159 41 16
1514 What makes you say that your Mamma shouldn't have let you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3379 0.03746 219 154 56 9
1515 Would it help if the home had cats instead of buffalo? 1.3379 0.03856 219 156 52 11
1516 We had been talking about your dog, your truck, and your wife. 1.3379 0.04068 219 160 44 15
1517 What led your wife to accuse you of having a mid-life crisis? 1.3379 0.04119 219 161 42 16
1518 How did it make you feel when those dogies wouldn't git along? 1.3378 0.03927 222 160 49 13
1519 Yes, if it helps, sing it. 1.3378 0.03714 222 156 57 9
1520 Of course you're neurotic. You play country and western. 1.3378 0.03875 222 159 51 12
1521 So do you know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em? 1.3378 0.03927 222 160 49 13
1522 Do you think you may be trying to tell yourself something with your rendition, "Home, Home On Derange"? 1.3378 0.04280 225 170 34 21
1523 So, do you think you should hold ‘em or fold ‘em? 1.3378 0.03788 225 160 54 11
1524 Take a sad song and make it better. 1.3377 0.04004 228 167 45 16
1525 So, your Mama wanted a doctor, or lawyer, or such? 1.3377 0.04004 228 167 45 16
1526 Pardon me. You said your girlfriend has not cheated on you and you don't drink to excess? 1.3377 0.03807 228 163 53 12
1527 So you feel anger that mama done let her baby grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3377 0.04243 231 175 34 22
1528 You know if you didn't have to rhyme I might find out more. 1.3368 0.04366 190 139 38 13
1529 Where do you feel most at home? 1.3366 0.04301 202 149 38 15
1530 So encouraging words are seldom heard? 1.3366 0.04126 202 146 44 12
1531 I’ll thank you not to spit tobacco juice on my Persian rug every time I mention your mother. 1.3366 0.04414 202 151 34 17
1532 If we can’t move past your old sad song, I’m afraid this will be our last session. 1.3366 0.04257 205 151 39 15
1533 So your mamma didn’t want you to grow up and become a cowboy? 1.3365 0.04045 208 150 46 12
1534 So you blame your mother for letting you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3365 0.04268 208 154 38 16
1535 I’d prefer your co-pay in cash, not Cash. 1.3365 0.04225 211 156 39 16
1536 Slim, not every sad story fits into a country song. 1.3365 0.04117 211 154 43 14
1537 Alright. Let's take you off all Country. I am prescribing 3 hours of Dixieland Jazz daily. We may add some Bubblegum Pop if that doesn't help. 1.3365 0.04172 211 155 41 15
1538 Full disclosure—I’d have grown up to be a cowboy if my mama had let me. 1.3365 0.04006 211 152 47 12
1539 And how did loosing your girl, your truck, and your dog make you feel? 1.3364 0.04438 214 163 30 21
1540 So you say the deer and the antelope aren't playing anymore? 1.3364 0.04183 214 158 40 16
1541 ... and when was it that you first started to feel lonesome? 1.3364 0.04038 217 158 45 14
1542 You know, it's never too late to give up and work in finance. 1.3364 0.04091 217 159 43 15
1543 You say you can't remember the Alamo? 1.3364 0.04294 217 163 35 19
1544 So, in the dream, you are playing guitar. What instruments do the deer and antelope play? 1.3364 0.04244 217 162 37 18
1545 So your woman left you, you lost your job, your dog died and you got drunk last night. How does that make you feel? 1.3364 0.04001 220 160 46 14
1546 I think you need to join a two-step group. 1.3364 0.04001 220 160 46 14
1547 'It's not quite what I had in mind when I said you should spend some time in the country.' 1.3363 0.03860 223 160 51 12
1548 Well, I have come to the conclusion that mommas really should not let their babies grow up to be cowboys. 1.3363 0.04114 223 165 41 17
1549 Why the blues, if the skies are not cloudy all day? 1.3363 0.03669 226 159 58 9
1550 Perhaps the deer and the antelope are the one's with the issues. 1.3363 0.03928 226 164 48 14
1551 You say you've been through the desert on a horse with no name, yet you now refer to it as "Mother." What do you think that means? 1.3362 0.03941 229 167 47 15
1552 So this just started out of the blues? 1.3362 0.03843 229 165 51 13
1553 And after the cattle drive... you felt empty. 1.3362 0.03941 229 167 47 15
1554 And how is your relationship with your... er...horse? 1.3362 0.03941 229 167 47 15
1555 Well, if you say: 'seldom is heard a discouraging word and the sky is not cloudy all day,' what's the problem? 1.3362 0.03919 235 172 47 16
1556 You can’t be “Back in the Saddle Again” until you conquer your fear of horses. 1.3362 0.04010 235 174 43 18
1557 Let's try to break from the 'what in tarnation' and concentrate on the 'who in tarnation'. 1.3361 0.03697 238 170 56 12
1558 It’s a new type of therapy where you play the guitar for 50 minutes and I charge you $200. 1.3352 0.04070 182 128 47 7
1559 You've got to stop blaming your mamma for letting you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3351 0.04263 188 136 41 11
1560 In my professional opinion, I don’t believe minor chords are a healthy coping mechanism. 1.3350 0.03872 197 138 52 7
1561 When I ask how something feels, I'd like you to use words. 1.3350 0.04027 200 143 47 10
1562 Beto, get a shave and run for President, it'll take your mind off yourself. 1.3350 0.04009 206 148 47 11
1563 Why do YOU think your mama didn't let you become a doctor, or lawyer, and such? 1.3350 0.04126 206 150 43 13
1564 I think it's fairly obvious why mom liked me best. 1.3349 0.04196 209 154 40 15
1565 Now tell me exactly how it struck a chord with you. 1.3349 0.03913 209 149 50 10
1566 Now, sing that one about your mother again. 1.3349 0.04046 212 154 45 13
1567 Wait, I'm still on the first verse... 1.3349 0.03990 212 153 47 12
1568 Yes, I understand you're a lone cowhand from the Rio Grande. Unfortunately, you also have 'mommy' issues. 1.3349 0.04023 218 159 45 14
1569 What brings you in today if indeed, seldom is heard a discouraging word? 1.3348 0.04087 221 163 42 16
1570 I am following you, just not in that key. 1.3348 0.04037 221 162 44 15
1571 I know you're so lonesome you could cry, but you have to remember you have friends, even if they are in low places. 1.3348 0.03999 224 164 45 15
1572 Did you say you went to Yale or to Jail? 1.3348 0.03687 224 158 57 9
1573 Sure, mosey can be a doorway to the subconscious. 1.3348 0.04060 227 168 42 17
1574 Tell me more about your relationship with the little dogie. 1.3348 0.03913 227 165 48 14
1575 Perhaps if you describe feeling “de-ranged”... 1.3348 0.03796 233 168 52 13
1576 Your mother was right. You can't play worth a damn. 1.3348 0.03796 233 168 52 13
1577 You say your horse left you? 1.3347 0.03764 236 170 53 13
1578 Where ‘seldom’ is heard a discouraging word”? That’s rich, coming from you 1.3347 0.04085 236 177 39 20
1579 Seldom is heard a discouraging word? Gimme a break. Everyday is cloudy in here and I'm sick of it. 1.3347 0.03996 236 175 43 18
1580 I'd like you to answer that same question again, this time in D Major. 1.3347 0.03858 236 172 49 15
1581 Country lyrics describe your troubles, but they don't solve them. 1.3347 0.03764 236 170 53 13
1582 What were your feelings towards Susanna when you had a banjo on your knee? 1.3347 0.03871 239 175 48 16
1583 Well, for openers, Hendrix and McCartney WERE left-handed. 1.3347 0.03916 239 176 46 17
1584 So, it's so lonely in the saddle since your horse died? 1.3347 0.03960 239 177 44 18
1585 Tell me more about your pick-up truck, your ole dog, and the gal that left you. 1.3347 0.03969 242 180 43 19
1586 I’ve noticed your use of minor chords when singing about your mother. 1.3333 0.03997 228 168 44 16
1587 So you came from Alabama with guitar on your knee... 1.3333 0.03885 201 142 51 8
1588 When you say your mule is stubborn, have you considered his point of view? 1.3333 0.04109 207 151 43 13
1589 How did you feel when she told you not to grow up and be a cowboy? 1.3333 0.04125 210 154 42 14
1590 I would like to revisit that last bar during our next session 1.3333 0.03937 216 156 48 12
1591 And sometimes a guitar is not just a guitar. 1.3333 0.04092 204 148 44 12
1592 And you say you've never been west of Park Avenue? 1.3333 0.04072 201 145 45 11
1593 lets start over. and a one two three four 1.3333 0.04133 201 146 43 12
1594 So your mama died, your girl left you, and you ended up on a train. Anything else bothering you? 1.3333 0.04202 216 161 38 17
1595 Excellent progress! Seldom is better than frequent. 1.3333 0.03899 228 166 48 14
1596 I'm sorry to inform you, but 'them cowtrail blues' isn't listed in the 'Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.' 1.3333 0.04052 207 150 45 12
1597 I see... and to you does the word “Range” signify land or a cooktop? 1.3333 0.04253 216 162 36 18
1598 We need to set some boundaries. I’m your doctor, not your partner. 1.3333 0.03893 195 137 51 7
1599 I agree the curves are great, but face it, Hal, it's a GUITAR! 1.3333 0.04146 231 174 37 20
1600 And how do you feel when the little doggies don't get along? 1.3333 0.04069 210 153 44 13
1601 I think you are doing remarkably well considering you lost your dog, your truck broke down and your girlfriend left you. 1.3333 0.03984 225 165 45 15
1602 I prescribed pickin' and grinnin', Mr. Farber. Clinically speaking, what you're doing is strummin' and bummin'. 1.3333 0.03899 228 166 48 14
1603 When did you first realise your heart felt so achey breaky? 1.3333 0.04175 198 144 42 12
1604 Even live, you sound like a broken record 1.3333 0.04084 213 156 43 14
1605 Do you think your feelings were brought about by the discouraging words or from the skies being cloudy all day? 1.3333 0.04342 195 144 37 14
1606 I think we've both heard this tune before. 1.3333 0.03879 246 182 46 18
1607 So, let me get this straight. You say ya woman done left ya and done took off with ya truck, dog, best friend and done left ya with this 'ere geetar. 1.3333 0.04253 216 162 36 18
1608 We’ll have to pick up next week on why your baby ain’t comin’ back. 1.3333 0.03847 219 157 51 11
1609 So discouraging words were more than seldom heard. Continue. 1.3333 0.04179 210 155 40 15
1610 It's New York City, Hank- I think you have delusions of pasture. 1.3333 0.04069 210 153 44 13
1611 How would you feel about making more effective use of your 45 minutes by skipping the refrain? 1.3333 0.03897 210 150 50 10
1612 Have you tried drinking the pain away? 1.3333 0.04424 201 151 33 17
1613 Have you considered that it is you who must git along, not the doggies? 1.3333 0.03993 207 149 47 11
1614 So in this dream, you just can’t keep them dogies rollin, no matter what? 1.3333 0.04252 201 148 39 14
1615 Why don’t you start with “Nobody Knows the Troubles I’ve Seen.” 1.3333 0.03919 222 161 48 13
1616 I think we can get at least three more albums out of this session 1.3333 0.04150 204 149 42 13
1617 So....your wife left you, your dog died, and then your truck broke down. But has anything unusual happened lately? 1.3333 0.03849 228 165 50 13
1618 Sorry, cash only - I can't host these sessions for a song. 1.3333 0.04342 195 144 37 14
1619 Don't blame your mother for letting you grow up to be a cowboy 1.3319 0.03877 238 175 47 16
1620 So let's start with your home on the range. 1.3319 0.03592 238 169 59 10
1621 And how long have you been hearing the lonesome sound of the whipporwill? 1.3319 0.03769 235 170 52 13
1622 Yes, but sometimes a ten-gallon hat is just a ten-gallon hat. 1.3319 0.03817 235 171 50 14
1623 And do you think your "no strings attached" approach is working? 1.3319 0.03864 235 172 48 15
1624 I think we can get to the bottom of most of that but—if we do—what will you have left to sing about? 1.3319 0.03817 235 171 50 14
1625 I'm happy to discuss your darling Clementine, but we really should finish with your Mother first. 1.3319 0.03869 226 164 49 13
1626 Going mad, going country... the DSM doesn't really make a distinction. 1.3319 0.04018 226 167 43 16
1627 How do the words "no talent" make you feel? 1.3318 0.04006 223 164 44 15
1628 A little Cole Porter might be the answer. 1.3318 0.03992 220 161 45 14
1629 I need to hear a few more verses before I’ll know if it’s Lonesome Cowboy Lovesick Blues or clinical depression 1.3318 0.03940 220 160 47 13
1630 Tell me about your achy-breaky heart 1.3318 0.03833 220 158 51 11
1631 Sometimes a guitar is just a guitar.... 1.3318 0.03922 217 157 48 12
1632 Why do you resent your mother for letting you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3318 0.04134 217 161 40 16
1633 If you sing "Darling Clementine" again, I'll have you committed. 1.3318 0.04286 217 164 34 19
1634 This week I'd like to circle back to your repressed memories of Dinah in the kitchen. 1.3318 0.04068 214 157 43 14
1635 We’ll come back to the deer and the antelope, but first tell me more about the sort of ‘discouraging word’ you’re not hearing. 1.3318 0.04014 214 156 45 13
1636 So, other than your momma, whiskey, trains, and prison, tell me something about yourself. 1.3318 0.04014 214 156 45 13
1637 Im flattered that you have written a song about me, but I am still going to charge you for this session and I would appreciate you taking your boots off my couch. 1.3318 0.04122 214 158 41 15
1638 I’d say if you keep breaking her G-string, it’s time to consider HER feelings. 1.3318 0.03959 214 155 47 12
1639 So tell me, what was it like growing up in a home on the range? 1.3318 0.04227 214 160 37 17
1640 So, going down the road feelin' bad. Then what? 1.3318 0.04068 214 157 43 14
1641 You can sing to your heart´s desire, but you are still paying for the session. 1.3318 0.04108 211 155 42 14
1642 When it gets down to it, the question you need to ask yourself is, “Zeke, does being home on the range still spark joy?” 1.3317 0.03918 208 149 49 10
1643 I’d like to explore your social relationships. Let’s begin with your friends in low places. 1.3317 0.04259 208 155 37 16
1644 Play Misty for me. 1.3317 0.04075 205 149 44 12
1645 So how does it make you feel that Mamma did let her baby grow up to be a cowboy, not a doctor or lawyer or such? 1.3317 0.04247 205 152 38 15
1646 ...and so she let you grow up to be one? 1.3317 0.03956 205 147 48 10
1647 ...and how long have you had this fear of rodeo clowns? 1.3317 0.04055 202 146 45 11
1648 I really wish you would remove your spurs before hitting the couch 1.3317 0.03869 202 143 51 8
1649 Is it just the name of the song or did your mother actually not want you to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3317 0.04096 199 144 44 11
1650 Try singing 'Thank God I'm a Country Boy' instead of 'Oh lonesome Me.' 1.3317 0.04034 199 143 46 10
1651 So, I’ve got you lost your job, your wife left you and then your dog died? Anything else you’d like to share? 1.3316 0.04384 196 146 35 15
1652 Where seldom is heard a discouraging word, you say? I think we're making progress... 1.3316 0.04074 196 141 45 10
1653 So, you say you've been having performance issues?" 1.3316 0.04201 196 143 41 12
1654 So far we’ve covered break-ups, trucks and the flag. 1.3316 0.04245 193 141 40 12
1655 So the deer and the antelope actually played together? 1.3305 0.03817 239 175 49 15
1656 It represents a penis. 1.3305 0.04033 236 177 40 19
1657 Do you have any lyrics that rhyme with "Oedipal" 1.3305 0.03978 233 173 43 17
1658 Strum the verse about your toilet training again. 1.3304 0.03919 230 169 46 15
1659 And how did this lonesome tumbleweed feel inside? 1.3304 0.03870 230 168 48 14
1660 Now try playing a song without the word lonesome in it 1.3304 0.03804 227 164 51 12
1661 Sorry to interrupt, but your spurs are ripping through the leather of my chaise lounge 1.3304 0.03855 227 165 49 13
1662 When she dumps you, the music will come. 1.3304 0.03889 224 163 48 13
1663 Why do you think you want the little dogies to git along? 1.3304 0.03991 224 165 44 15
1664 Let's hear the refrain about your mother again. 1.3303 0.04129 221 165 39 17
1665 Dan, let's try and understand them, not just rope, throw, and brand them. 1.3303 0.04079 221 164 41 16
1666 Hold on, Amos. So the coyote and can of beans aren’t metaphors? 1.3303 0.04014 218 160 44 14
1667 your dog died, your girlfriend left you, and what was that about your pickup truck? 1.3303 0.04014 218 160 44 14
1668 Would you say, seldom is heard an encouraging word? 1.3303 0.03961 218 159 46 13
1669 Classic case of the blues. 1.3302 0.04210 215 161 37 17
1670 Try singing about alcohol, bad bosses or break-ups instead of how little musical talent you have. 1.3302 0.03944 215 156 47 12
1671 I’ve got nerves that jingle jangle jingle. 1.3302 0.04052 215 158 43 14
1672 So, the trail is long, women are "no good", and you're drunk. What else? 1.3302 0.03998 215 157 45 13
1673 Well, perhaps open mic night isn’t the same kind of safe space. 1.3302 0.04052 215 158 43 14
1674 '" Mr. Smith,about your issues,I said you had to fess up not dress up." 1.3302 0.03981 212 154 46 12
1675 Sometimes, a guitar is just a guitar. How often are you strumming? 1.3302 0.04092 212 156 42 14
1676 Every week, it's the same old song with you. 1.3302 0.04092 212 156 42 14
1677 How did the discouraging word make you feel? 1.3302 0.03924 212 153 48 11
1678 I assure you there are some very fine musicians who never played Carnegie Hall. 1.3301 0.03783 209 148 53 8
1679 I can’t lower your dosage until you stop writing ballads in E Minor. 1.3301 0.04242 209 156 37 16
1680 And when did you first start believing that the skies are not cloudy or gray? 1.3301 0.04000 206 149 46 11
1681 Where the buffaloes groan? Maybe you should rethink that... 1.3301 0.04230 206 153 38 15
1682 Okay, from the top: 'My childhood was hell, my dog ate the cat, my house wouldn't sell, and I'm gettin' fat.' 1.3300 0.04441 203 154 31 18
1683 Actually, that sounds more like the blues 1.3300 0.03978 203 146 47 10
1684 You may be from the OK chorale, but — you’re actually just so-so. 1.3300 0.04273 203 151 37 15
1685 Yes, you are definitely a little high strung. 1.3300 0.04216 203 150 39 14
1686 ...you have to accept that you're just a lonesome cowpoke and move on. 1.3300 0.04099 203 148 43 12
1687 But do you REALLY remember the Red River Valley? 1.3300 0.03978 203 146 47 10
1688 How long have you felt like a rapper trapped inside a country singer's body? 1.3299 0.04244 197 145 39 13
1689 You know what that tune means... Our time is up. 1.3299 0.04289 194 143 38 13
1690 The deer and antelope are benign fantasy but this obsession about 'discouraging words' seems passive aggressive towards our work. 1.3299 0.04351 194 144 36 14
1691 Before we begin, can you play "Girl from Ipanema?" 1.3298 0.04461 191 143 33 15
1692 So you you’re saying is that your momma didn’t want you to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3298 0.04207 191 139 41 11
1693 Yes, I HAVE heard that one before! 1.3293 0.03577 249 179 58 12
1694 So what your saying is that although it was indeed the west Texas town of El Paso but you actually fell in love with a mexican boy? 1.3292 0.03894 240 178 45 17
1695 Git along lil' dogie. We're almost out of time. 1.3291 0.03837 237 174 48 15
1696 Perhaps a cardiologist could help you with your "achy breaky heart." 1.3291 0.03929 237 176 44 17
1697 And so tell me more about these buffaloes roaming in your home 1.3291 0.03883 237 175 46 16
1698 I don't appreciate people with dirt on their boots [submitted by Noah, age 8] 1.3291 0.03870 234 172 47 15
1699 You simply have to accept that people are not going to give you a home on a range. 1.3291 0.03917 234 173 45 16
1700 How long have you had these Desperado feelings? 1.3291 0.03870 234 172 47 15
1701 It sounds like you're feeling lonesome... 1.3290 0.03904 231 170 46 15
1702 Before we go further into the sordid details of your life, tell me, where did you get those beautiful boots? 1.3290 0.03952 231 171 44 16
1703 Your strumming your pain with your fingers,Tex,and it's killing you softly. 1.3289 0.03686 228 163 55 10
1704 Tell me more about your truck. 1.3289 0.04084 228 171 39 18
1705 What I'm hearing is that your dogies won't git. 1.3289 0.04037 228 170 41 17
1706 We could cover more of your issues if you skip the second chorus. 1.3289 0.03823 225 163 50 12
1707 Let’s put aside your girl, truck, and dog... 1.3289 0.03823 225 163 50 12
1708 You want a second opinion huh, well you're ugly too. 1.3289 0.03823 225 163 50 12
1709 Call me judgemental, call me old-fashioned, but I still believe that a gentleman, when indoors, removes his hat. 1.3288 0.03998 219 161 44 14
1710 Just as I suspected: country-line personality disorder. 1.3288 0.04102 219 163 40 16
1711 Willie, sure you're lonely, blue, cryin', and in love, but you aren't crazy. 1.3288 0.03783 219 157 52 10
1712 More like “Home on the Deranged” in my opinion. 1.3287 0.04193 216 162 37 17
1713 I’ll tell you why the cowboy wanted a dachshund. He wanted to get a long little doggie. 1.3287 0.04244 216 163 35 18
1714 How you feel about your mama letting you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3287 0.03983 216 158 45 13
1715 It is not the guitar's fault you sound terrible. 1.3286 0.03852 213 153 50 10
1716 But in our previous session you told me that you wanted a life with no strings attached. 1.3286 0.04075 213 157 42 14
1717 I sense you're in a rut. Every week I hear the same old song. 1.3286 0.04021 213 156 44 13
1718 Your song has the cheatin' wife,heartbreak,beer,boots,honkytonk,truck,and tractor. But nothing about a dog. Tell me about the dog. 1.3286 0.04021 213 156 44 13
1719 So, your wife left and your dog died, but what happened to your horse? 1.3286 0.04075 213 157 42 14
1720 It’s alright, I often have people coming in here singing the blues. 1.3286 0.03946 210 152 47 11
1721 Working "for a song" is just an expression. 1.3286 0.04115 210 155 41 14
1722 Speaking of desire, tell me more about your hat. 1.3286 0.04115 210 155 41 14
1723 Most patients just tell me their problems. 1.3286 0.04059 210 154 43 13
1724 So tell me, how did you get the name 'Billy the Id' ? 1.3286 0.04278 210 158 35 17
1725 Why are you so fixated on the G-string 1.3285 0.04099 207 152 42 13
1726 Okay, but this time, let me sing the harmony. 1.3285 0.04156 207 153 40 14
1727 I'm afraid I can't help, nothing rhymes with orange. 1.3285 0.03803 207 147 52 8
1728 Tell you what: you play Willie Nelson and I'll play Doctor. 1.3284 0.04198 204 151 39 14
1729 I'm afraid we're out of time. It was 4/4, correct? 1.3284 0.04123 201 147 42 12
1730 And why do you think your little dogies won’t git along? 1.3283 0.03976 198 142 47 9
1731 Have you ever thought that you actually want to be lonesome? 1.3282 0.04145 195 142 42 11
1732 And what are your feelings toward this "little doggie" person you keep referring to? 1.3282 0.04208 195 143 40 12
1733 Let's begin with the premise that you don't have to suffer to sing the blues. 1.3281 0.04056 192 138 45 9
1734 And so we shall try to discover why,indeed,your guitar gently weeps. 1.3281 0.04253 192 141 39 12
1735 If we are to get anywhere you have to stop singing the same old tune. 1.3280 0.04428 189 141 34 14
1736 Do you want me to take the country out of the boy, or the boy out of the country? 1.3280 0.04478 186 139 33 14
1737 Ok, your mama got out of prison, you went to pick her up in the rain, before you got to the station in your pick up truck, she was run over by a train. Uh huh. Sounds familiar. Keep going... 1.3278 0.03698 241 175 53 13
1738 I'm hearing: B,A,G,G,A,G,E# 1.3277 0.03995 235 176 41 18
1739 In my professional opinion, no, you are not crazy for feeling so lonely. 1.3275 0.03876 229 168 47 14
1740 Try to remember. You must have sometimes heard a discouraging word from your mother. 1.3275 0.03974 229 170 43 16
1741 Try it again with a little less feeling 1.3274 0.03911 226 166 46 14
1742 I understand how you feel about picking on her, but you shouldn’t fret about it. 1.3274 0.03860 226 165 48 13
1743 Perhaps you could express yourself more fully with castanets. 1.3274 0.03809 226 164 50 12
1744 So, why do you want to play me a song you wrote about a cowboy who kills his psychiatrist? 1.3274 0.03682 223 159 55 9
1745 You sound a little flat. 1.3273 0.03931 220 161 46 13
1746 It sounds like you’re just picking on yourself. 1.3273 0.04086 220 164 40 16
1747 So? What makes you think you're high strung? 1.3273 0.04086 220 164 40 16
1748 It's a form of PTSD. We used to call it Saddle Fatigue. 1.3273 0.03983 220 162 44 14
1749 So you’re telling me that sometimes a guitar is just a guitar... 1.3272 0.03858 217 157 49 11
1750 Sounds like you’re angry your mama let her baby grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3271 0.04005 214 157 44 13
1751 How long has it been since you lost your home on the range? 1.3271 0.04059 214 158 42 14
1752 I don't think your relationship with your horse is the problem. 1.3270 0.04099 211 156 41 14
1753 If you try reversing your behavior, you may get your truck, your dog, and your wife back." 1.3270 0.03930 211 153 47 11
1754 We'll explore the deer and antelope in time. I'm afraid our attention is more urgently required by the buffalo. 1.3270 0.04043 211 155 43 13
1755 I can be your psychiatrist or I can be your muse, but I can't be both. 1.3270 0.03987 211 154 45 12
1756 So, I'm taking it this ain't your 1st rodeo? 1.3270 0.03813 211 151 51 9
1757 Tell me more about the verse where your horse married your girlfriend. 1.3270 0.04043 211 155 43 13
1758 So there you are on the range. What happens next? 1.3269 0.03967 208 151 46 11
1759 I don't see many left-handed guitar players in here. 1.3269 0.04083 208 153 42 13
1760 So you're telling me that you've lost your edge because of your faithful wife, your well-adjusted children, your intolerance for booze, and your luxury condo over the Hollywood Hills ? 1.3269 0.04139 208 154 40 14
1761 So, your home is...not on the range? 1.3268 0.04006 205 149 45 11
1762 So, you had 100 bottles of beer on the wall. Now, you have 3. How does that make you feel?" 1.3268 0.04181 205 152 39 14
1763 Tell me again what kind of blues you got. 1.3268 0.04238 205 153 37 15
1764 You may hear a few discouraging words, but it's still fairly seldom. 1.3268 0.04238 205 153 37 15
1765 You say it began with a Mexican girl in El Paso? 1.3267 0.04165 202 149 40 13
1766 Lucille lives with me now, Slim. Coming here and singing that song every week just isn’t productive. 1.3267 0.04339 202 152 34 16
1767 At least tune the damn thing 1.3267 0.04106 202 148 42 12
1768 Tell me how that made you feel. In the key of G. 1.3267 0.04165 202 149 40 13
1769 So, now when you're back home on the range you hear a discouraging word? 1.3266 0.04147 199 146 41 12
1770 I hope the noises in your head sound better then what I'm hearing 1.3266 0.04208 199 147 39 13
1771 Well, Tex, I would surmise that you're missing a few strings. 1.3266 0.04268 199 148 37 14
1772 In the wake of what’s happened with your dog, and now your wife - it’s clear you’re dealing with some serious abandonment issues. 1.3266 0.03581 248 179 57 12
1773 And how did it make you feel when you first heard that discouraging word? 1.3263 0.03889 236 175 45 16
1774 It’s a great song, but it won’t bring back your horse. 1.3262 0.04052 187 134 45 8
1775 You say “Seldom was heard ...” Exactly how often? 1.3262 0.04108 233 177 36 20
1776 Please describe the events on the day you became so happy you could no longer write a country song. 1.3261 0.03911 230 170 45 15
1777 When did you first experience these lonesome feelings? 1.3261 0.03711 230 166 53 11
1778 Now sing to me again why your Momma didn’t want her son to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3261 0.03911 230 170 45 15
1779 And why do you think you're so lonesome? 1.3261 0.03812 230 168 49 13
1780 If you’re free of depression you’ll never sing country again... 1.3260 0.03846 227 166 48 13
1781 Pardner, it's time to move from 'music therapy' to 'talk therapy." 1.3259 0.04032 224 167 41 16
1782 Let’s begin with that one you wrote about your mother. 1.3259 0.03776 224 162 51 11
1783 That's pretty dark. Have you tried it in a major key? 1.3259 0.03982 224 166 43 15
1784 So not having a home where the buffalo roam ... how does that make you feel? 1.3258 0.03916 221 162 46 13
1785 You seem conflicted between Country and the Blues 1.3258 0.03863 221 161 48 12
1786 I'd say you really opened up well about momma, trains, drinking, brothels, work, the gov't, and the women that did ya wrong for a first session. Let's do this again next week 1.3258 0.04019 221 164 42 15
1787 I really see no need to fret so much. 1.3258 0.03863 221 161 48 12
1788 I think your issues stem from this Mexican maiden in the West Texas town of El Paso. 1.3258 0.03809 221 160 50 11
1789 Your fretting strikes a major chord with me. 1.3258 0.04120 221 166 38 17
1790 So, to recap: jail, your mother, a dog, a pickup truck, rain, and dammed ol' train. Did I get that right? 1.3256 0.04149 215 161 38 16
1791 And why don't you feel home on the range? 1.3256 0.04043 215 159 42 14
1792 Can you play that verse about your mother again? 1.3256 0.03989 215 158 44 13
1793 No! I don’t want to hear “Guantanamera” again. 1.3256 0.04303 215 164 32 19
1794 So you resent your Mama for letting you grow up to be a cowboy... 1.3256 0.03989 215 158 44 13
1795 How do we help you become a CowMAN? 1.3255 0.04027 212 156 43 13
1796 Just sing what comes into your mind. 1.3255 0.03914 212 154 47 11
1797 OK, your woman done left you and your dog done died. But how does that make you feel? 1.3254 0.04178 209 156 38 15
1798 So tell me, why don't 'you' feel at home on the range? 1.3254 0.03951 209 152 46 11
1799 So, darlin' Clementine was lost. How does that make you feel? 1.3254 0.03951 209 152 46 11
1800 Is that when the bullying over your falsetto began? 1.3254 0.04286 209 158 34 17
1801 How long have you been feeling lonesome and blue? 1.3253 0.03789 249 185 47 17
1802 I'll forego a decade's worth of psychological exploration and analysis, and cut to the point. That's a left-handed guitar. 1.3252 0.04220 206 154 37 15
1803 I can't help people compose the blues; I help people get over the blues. 1.3252 0.04106 206 152 41 13
1804 Are you trying to tell me you can't pay my bill because the antidepressants are making you too happy to write country songs? 1.3252 0.03989 206 150 45 11
1805 Now that you've sung about your horse, sing about your relationship with your mother. 1.3252 0.03930 206 149 47 10
1806 Western Psychiatry 1.3252 0.04106 206 152 41 13
1807 Have you considered the possibility that your problem does NOT rhyme with "Old Cow Hand" or "Rio Grande"? 1.3252 0.03688 246 180 52 14
1808 Just accept that you’re not on the range anymore, you will hear many a discouraging word here. it’s not personal 1.3251 0.04088 203 149 42 12
1809 Hmm, so your baby done left you for someone better, din' say goodbye or leave a letter. How does that make you feel? 1.3250 0.04366 200 151 33 16
1810 The cause of all your problems is that your mama let her babies grow up to be cowboys. 1.3250 0.04068 200 146 43 11
1811 How long have you identified as a violinist? 1.3250 0.03887 240 179 44 17
1812 Well, how would you feel about adding a fourth chord? 1.3250 0.04068 200 146 43 11
1813 Tell me about your cowboyhood. 1.3249 0.03782 237 174 49 14
1814 I'm guessing you want to walk this lonesome valley again this week. 1.3249 0.04046 197 143 44 10
1815 You say her name is Lucille? 1.3247 0.04152 194 142 41 11
1816 Have you ever considered finding a home where the buffalo don't roam? 1.3247 0.04402 194 146 33 15
1817 Sorry Roy but you are on the gene autreyism spectrum 1.3247 0.04216 194 143 39 12
1818 I can't give you the blues... it just wouldn't be ethical 1.3247 0.04087 194 141 43 10
1819 Tell me more about "boy?" After all these years, why not "cowman?" 1.3247 0.04085 231 175 37 19
1820 She’s not coming back, Roy. Now, sing something about your mother. 1.3246 0.04076 228 172 38 18
1821 It sounds like you've got a right to sing the blues. 1.3246 0.03832 228 167 48 13
1822 Pick, pick, pick! Sounds like that's all you do! 1.3244 0.04017 225 168 41 16
1823 Tell me more about this dogie. 1.3244 0.04114 225 170 37 18
1824 How would you describe your relationship with your horse? 1.3243 0.03741 222 160 52 10
1825 What makes you think others still see you as a kid, Bill? 1.3243 0.03848 222 162 48 12
1826 Why do you think the buffalo roam? 1.3242 0.04042 219 163 41 15
1827 And when your ex-wife left with your truck and your dog, how did that make you feel? 1.3242 0.03989 219 162 43 14
1828 I see. So you woke up this morning and shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die. 1.3242 0.04042 219 163 41 15
1829 Tex, let's try to get beyond "What would Waylon and Willie do?" 1.3242 0.03829 219 159 49 11
1830 I guess we’re both keeping time today 1.3241 0.04133 216 162 38 16
1831 So your wife left you, your dog ran away, and your pickup trucked died? How were things bedore that? 1.3241 0.04133 216 162 38 16
1832 So, when you say “Get along little dogie,” do you mean “Please move out, Mother? 1.3239 0.04011 213 157 43 13
1833 What I’m hearing you say is, ‘She done me wrong.’ I think it’s time to discuss ‘enabling.’ 1.3239 0.04066 213 158 41 14
1834 Are you lonesome, cowboy? Or is that just a metaphor? 1.3238 0.04050 210 155 42 13
1835 In your case, you can blame your mother. 1.3238 0.04215 210 158 36 16
1836 Your G-string is a little tight. 1.3238 0.04215 210 158 36 16
1837 For most of my patients the 'id' comes out best in E flat. 1.3238 0.03877 210 152 48 10
1838 Now the next verse...what happened after your wife cheated on you? 1.3238 0.03993 210 154 44 12
1839 So Sam, how was Yosemite? 1.3238 0.04215 210 158 36 16
1840 In theses dreams where you're walking out in the streets of Laredo -- what exactly do you see? 1.3237 0.04089 207 153 41 13
1841 OK, now play it like you did in the dream. 1.3237 0.03853 207 149 49 9
1842 Let's further explore your relationship with that horse you keep singing about. 1.3235 0.03624 238 172 55 11
1843 Why do you think your mama let you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3235 0.03907 238 178 43 17
1844 You're repeating yourself. 1.3235 0.03996 238 180 39 19
1845 How does all your exes living in Texas make you feel? 1.3234 0.03703 235 171 52 12
1846 You blame your mamma, ja? For letting her baby grow up to be cowboy?” 1.3233 0.03882 232 172 45 15
1847 I'm not sure an 'achy breaky heart' appears anywhere in the American Psychiatric Journal. 1.3232 0.04394 198 150 32 16
1848 I think it's possible that the town IS big enough for the two of you. 1.3229 0.04044 192 139 44 9
1849 We’re not discussing your mother. Can YOU forgive you for growing up to be a cowboy? 1.3229 0.04111 192 140 42 10
1850 It sounds to me like the same old song. 1.3229 0.03937 223 165 44 14
1851 I thought that's where you seldom heard a discouraging word. 1.3229 0.03988 223 166 42 15
1852 You’re even depressing me with those minor chords. 1.3229 0.03886 223 164 46 13
1853 Change ‘lonesome’ to ‘gregarious.’ How does that make you feel? 1.3228 0.04221 189 139 39 11
1854 No, we don't validate for "horse parking." 1.3228 0.04016 189 136 45 8
1855 When did you realize you were trying to play it left-handed? 1.3227 0.03921 220 162 45 13
1856 Wait -- your dog cheated on you. So why blame your woman? 1.3227 0.04026 220 164 41 15
1857 Your horse was right, you should let him do the vocals. 1.3227 0.04077 220 165 39 16
1858 Hold on. Your wife, your girl, and your baby are all the same person? 1.3227 0.04178 220 167 35 18
1859 Was it really the deer or antelope’s fault? 1.3226 0.04064 217 162 40 15
1860 I charge extra for providing lyrics. 1.3226 0.03958 217 160 44 13
1861 Your early stuff is very important, but do you know any Pink Freud? 1.3226 0.04011 217 161 42 14
1862 It's going to be tough to top our last hit. 1.3226 0.04168 217 164 36 17
1863 And how long have you had this feeling you were a stereotype? 1.3226 0.04011 217 161 42 14
1864 Sing me the one about you and your Father. 1.3226 0.03958 217 160 44 13
1865 Having the blues is one thing; singing about them is just annoying. 1.3226 0.04116 217 163 38 16
1866 I get it. Your dog has fleas. Let's move on. 1.3226 0.04011 217 161 42 14
1867 So you say your Mama Tried. 1.3226 0.03793 217 157 50 10
1868 Did you have a history of depression before you met this redhead from Laredo? 1.3226 0.03903 217 159 46 12
1869 "Tell me about your home, home on the range." 1.3224 0.03995 214 158 43 13
1870 So, this Billy The Kid, he's a coworker of yours? 1.3224 0.04050 214 159 41 14
1871 Did you ever just try playing "Happy Days are Here Again"? 1.3224 0.04050 214 159 41 14
1872 So this "range" you keep singing about... tell me why it feels like home to you. 1.3224 0.03827 214 155 49 10
1873 I charge $300 a verse. 1.3224 0.04050 214 159 41 14
1874 Did you ever write a version where the dog stays? 1.3224 0.03940 214 157 45 12
1875 Slow up, Jake. Did you say your dog took your pick-up to New Mexico to see your ex-wife? 1.3223 0.04089 211 157 40 14
1876 Doc, I'll tell ya I'm so lonesome I could cry 1.3223 0.04033 211 156 42 13
1877 Would it take you out of your comfort zone if you played a fourth chord 1.3223 0.04144 211 158 38 15
1878 You lost your woman. You lost your farm. Tell me about losing your dog. 1.3221 0.04129 208 155 39 14
1879 And how did your mother feel about her baby growing up to be a cowboy? 1.3221 0.04129 208 155 39 14
1880 So your troubles began AFTER your truck broke down, your dog died, and your wife left you? 1.3221 0.04295 208 158 33 17
1881 So, how does it make you feel, that your mom let you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3221 0.04129 208 155 39 14
1882 Let take this from the top. 1.3221 0.04129 208 155 39 14
1883 Let's go back to the part when you transitioned to A minor, how did it make you feel? 1.3221 0.04129 208 155 39 14
1884 Play me something about your mother. 1.3220 0.04055 205 151 42 12
1885 Are all of your songs about your mother? 1.3220 0.04171 205 153 38 14
1886 Well, one thing I'd consider, is that your living in Boston 1.3220 0.04113 205 152 40 13
1887 So you really wanted to play the violin? 1.3220 0.04339 205 156 32 17
1888 You're overthinking the reason people call you Lefty. 1.3218 0.04155 202 150 39 13
1889 What do you think “odl lay hee” means? 1.3217 0.03902 230 171 44 15
1890 Why are you so high strung? 1.3216 0.04375 199 151 32 16
1891 Just remember, it is their misfortune and none of your own. 1.3216 0.03887 227 168 45 14
1892 Interesting that you named your guitar after your mother. 1.3216 0.03786 227 166 49 12
1893 I didn't ask 'why' your wife took your dog and your truck. I asked how it made you feel. 1.3216 0.03837 227 167 47 13
1894 It must be hard when your home isn't on the range. 1.3216 0.03837 227 167 47 13
1895 Let's see....you were walking down the streets of Loredo. Then, what happened? 1.3214 0.03766 224 163 50 11
1896 Doc, it’s been forty years and I still haven’t figured out how to tell my Mama that her baby grew up to be a cowboy. 1.3213 0.04259 221 170 31 20
1897 Do you think it wants to be tuned? 1.3213 0.03906 221 163 45 13
1898 So, let's see if I understand you correctly: You fell in love with your guitar because it wears a G string? 1.3211 0.04151 218 165 36 17
1899 So, you say your baby done left you. 1.3211 0.04048 218 163 40 15
1900 Let's go back to when you got along with the little doggies... 1.3211 0.03664 218 156 54 8
1901 What about hearing the whippoorwill makes you so lonesome you could cry? 1.3211 0.03996 218 162 42 14
1902 I think a G-major seventh is what you're looking for. 1.3211 0.03996 218 162 42 14
1903 Dusty, are you aware the only song you know is "Mama Don't Allow?" 1.3211 0.04151 218 165 36 17
1904 Sometimes a Guitar is only a Guitar. 1.3209 0.03979 215 159 43 13
1905 Tell me more about this achy breaky heart you mentioned. 1.3209 0.03869 215 157 47 11
1906 What do you think all hat and no cows means? 1.3209 0.03869 215 157 47 11
1907 Do you really think the deer and antelope were playing? 1.3207 0.03820 237 176 46 15
1908 And why do you think watching the deer and the antelope play causes you feelings of jealousy? 1.3206 0.03941 209 153 45 11
1909 Do you know the lyrics to "How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?" 1.3206 0.04223 209 158 35 16
1910 It seems to me that you need not only to forget, but to *forgive* the Alamo. 1.3205 0.03994 234 177 39 18
1911 This isn’t what the ad meant by “couple’s therapy”, but we’ll give it a shot. 1.3204 0.03919 206 150 46 10
1912 This is the fourth week you've played 'Desperado.' Maybe it's time to move on. 1.3204 0.04038 206 152 42 12
1913 That's the same old song and dance you gave me last time, without the dance. 1.3200 0.04057 200 147 42 11
1914 I'm not so sure 'Yippee-ki-yay' is a legitimate disorder. 1.3200 0.03958 225 168 42 15
1915 I would say that's A-Minor problem. Let's get in tune with A-Major one. 1.3200 0.04356 200 152 32 16
1916 Tell me more about your aversion to a burial on the lone prairie. 1.3200 0.03908 225 167 44 14
1917 And how does the fact that your woman left you and your dog up and died make you feel? 1.3200 0.04057 200 147 42 11
1918 Everybody expects me to Know When to Hold Them, Know When to Fold Them, Know When to Walk Away and Know When to Run. 1.3200 0.04057 200 147 42 11
1919 And why do you think you don't want to be fenced in? 1.3198 0.03577 247 180 55 12
1920 So what I’m hearing is, all your Ex’s live in Texas. How does that make you feel? 1.3198 0.03483 247 178 59 10
1921 It is common for a cowboy to have anger at his cowfather. 1.3198 0.04242 222 171 31 20
1922 Tell me about your first memories of being out of tune. 1.3198 0.03891 222 164 45 13
1923 So, your low self-esteem stems from the deer and the antelope not letting you play with them? 1.3196 0.03927 219 162 44 13
1924 So,you say you’re so lonesome you could cry. 1.3196 0.03927 219 162 44 13
1925 Must we start each session with a cover of, "Crazy?" 1.3195 0.03682 241 177 51 13
1926 Could be worse; it's not a banjo. 1.3195 0.03728 241 178 49 14
1927 I suggest you change your tune. 1.3195 0.03774 241 179 47 15
1928 I'm thinking that the roaming buffalo is a metaphor. 1.3194 0.04123 216 163 37 16
1929 Ok, now let's discuss your frets 1.3194 0.03909 216 159 45 12
1930 So, what do you think "Yippie I Oh Kiya " means 1.3194 0.03853 216 158 47 11
1931 Have you tried not lamenting? 1.3194 0.03964 216 160 43 13
1932 This isn’t what I meant when I agreed to sliding scale, Duke. 1.3194 0.03964 216 160 43 13
1933 And did you tell Old Paint how that made you feel? 1.3194 0.04071 216 162 39 15
1934 You seem to be holding on to something. 1.3194 0.04071 216 162 39 15
1935 Your problem is a classic case of dissonance, pardner. 1.3194 0.03797 216 157 49 10
1936 You seem inseparable, but sometimes a guitar is just a guitar 1.3193 0.03712 238 175 50 13
1937 And why do you care if the little dogies git along? 1.3193 0.03414 238 169 62 7
1938 You have to remember, Mr. Hatfield, sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.3193 0.03853 238 178 44 16
1939 I just want to reassure you: I am recording this session 1.3192 0.04056 213 159 40 14
1940 In this recurring dream, why do you think your mother loves jazz 1.3192 0.04110 213 160 38 15
1941 I get it. You don't have to sing "Oh Lonesome Me" again. 1.3190 0.03983 210 155 43 12
1942 Ah, but you have to really want to be lonesome. 1.3190 0.03925 210 154 45 11
1943 So how you coping since your wife up and left, your dog died, and your truck broke down? 1.3190 0.04040 210 156 41 13
1944 Anger at mama for not letting you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3190 0.03726 232 170 50 12
1945 What's a six-letter word for 'anachronism'? 1.3188 0.04079 207 154 40 13
1946 Psychologically speaking, comfort guitars are somewhat rare. 1.3188 0.03758 229 168 49 12
1947 My five o'clock already played Jimi Hendrix, do you know any polkas? 1.3188 0.03858 229 170 45 14
1948 I was with you until ‘Yippee Ti Yi Yay’. 1.3188 0.03908 229 171 43 15
1949 Uh huh... and how did it feel when your mama told you not to grow up and be a cowboy? 1.3186 0.04120 204 152 39 13
1950 Do you know "I Fall to Pieces"? 1.3186 0.04001 204 150 43 11
1951 So you're no longer gitting along with your little dogies? 1.3186 0.04001 204 150 43 11
1952 She left you, you got drunk, your truck broke, can we move on?" 1.3186 0.03993 226 170 40 16
1953 Right no girl, no job, no cigarettes keep going 1.3186 0.03943 226 169 42 15
1954 No, I won’t make a campfire. 1.3186 0.04042 226 171 38 17
1955 I'm afraid "lonesome" still hasn't made the DSM. 1.3184 0.03915 201 146 46 9
1956 Strum und Drang 1.3184 0.04080 223 169 37 17
1957 Yes...but I notice that you have no songs about your mother... 1.3184 0.03824 223 164 47 12
1958 And sometimes, Tex, a guitar isn't just a guitar 1.3184 0.03979 223 167 41 15
1959 It doesn't technically count as delusions of grandeur if you think you're a middling country musician. 1.3184 0.03639 245 180 52 13
1960 Your life sounds like a country song. 1.3182 0.03669 242 178 51 13
1961 Momma never did let me be a cowboy. 1.3182 0.03965 220 164 42 14
1962 At least she left your guitar. 1.3182 0.03804 220 161 48 11
1963 Still, my guitar gently weeps. 1.3182 0.04081 198 146 41 11
1964 First, the whippoorwill needs to accept and embrace that he's alone. 1.3182 0.04081 198 146 41 11
1965 Soooo, tell me more about that horse you rode in on. 1.3182 0.03858 220 162 46 12
1966 Let's leave Mama out of this. Can YOU forgive you for growing up to be a cowboy? 1.3182 0.03912 220 163 44 13
1967 No anxiety, no worries, no cares...well clearly you’re delusional. 1.3180 0.03793 239 178 46 15
1968 Even cowboys get the blues, but yours has strings attached. 1.3180 0.04055 217 163 39 15
1969 I take it you are no longer at the "I'm O.K. Corral? " 1.3179 0.03925 195 141 46 8
1970 Yes,I know obsession is a discouraging word. 1.3178 0.03872 236 177 43 16
1971 Playing guitar left -handed is an obvious sign of the issues you are facing 1.3178 0.03930 214 158 44 12
1972 Would you be available to play at my daughter's birthday party? 1.3178 0.03874 214 157 46 11
1973 I believe you are suffering from seasonal post-round up, my gal done gone and left me blues. 1.3178 0.04200 214 163 34 17
1974 You've made great progress since the heavy metal setback. 1.3178 0.03930 214 158 44 12
1975 I get it, Jeb. You’re an old cowhand from the Rio Grande. Now can we go a little deeper than that? 1.3178 0.03985 214 159 42 13
1976 So your mother was run over by a damned ole train the same day your dog died?" 1.3177 0.04294 192 144 35 13
1977 I have a feeling you're just playing along. 1.3176 0.03712 233 171 50 12
1978 When did the skies get cloudy? 1.3175 0.03910 211 155 45 11
1979 So, you wrote an ode to beans. I'll be back in a bit. 1.3175 0.04188 211 160 35 16
1980 Well...music isn’t always therapy. 1.3175 0.03910 211 155 45 11
1981 Now you're depressing me too 1.3175 0.03967 211 156 43 12
1982 How can I help you if you sing the same old song at each session? 1.3175 0.04469 189 144 30 15
1983 Tell me about your horse's mother... 1.3175 0.04209 189 140 38 11
1984 Give your wife some more time. It took her two years to adjust to the circus clown. 1.3175 0.04405 189 143 32 14
1985 So when did you find yourself drawn...to the Upper West Side? 1.3174 0.03744 230 169 49 12
1986 You say you're always fretting. Could it just be an occupational hazard? 1.3174 0.03844 230 171 45 14
1987 How are things at home, home on the range? 1.3173 0.04062 208 155 40 13
1988 Doggone shame is a difficult thing to work through. 1.3173 0.03946 208 153 44 11
1989 That memory seems to have really struck a chord with you. 1.3173 0.04005 208 154 42 12
1990 How long have you been carrying that tune? 1.3172 0.03878 227 169 44 14
1991 My prognosis is that you have a phobia of trains, pick-up trucks and ex girlfriends. 1.3172 0.03828 227 168 46 13
1992 All you need is a little fine tuning. 1.3172 0.03724 227 166 50 11
1993 I believe you have a singing cowboy complex. 1.3172 0.03928 227 170 42 15
1994 On second thought, don't tell me about your mother. 1.3172 0.04026 227 172 38 17
1995 No you cannot use my professional advice in your lyrics." 1.3172 0.03878 227 169 44 14
1996 In the second verse you mentioned that you you never had a little red wagon. 1.3172 0.03724 227 166 50 11
1997 Tell me how you feel about these discouraging words you heard. 1.3172 0.03724 227 166 50 11
1998 Why is it important to you that the dogies git along? 1.3171 0.03984 205 151 43 11
1999 So you want the little dogies not just to git along, but to WANT to git along. 1.3171 0.03581 246 180 54 12
2000 OK, so she done you wrong. What was your relationship like with your mother? 1.3171 0.04103 205 153 39 13
2001 So, you also play the oboe? 1.3171 0.03581 246 180 54 12
2002 So, how did it make you feel when she ‘done you wrong?’ 1.3170 0.03810 224 165 47 12
2003 I'll need a songwriting credit for this one. 1.3168 0.04144 202 151 38 13
2004 Why don't you tell me why YOU think all your friends are in low places? 1.3168 0.03835 202 146 48 8
2005 So your dog died and your woman done left you, and now you're worried about bad things coming in threes. 1.3167 0.03844 221 163 46 12
2006 Yes, I understand you shot a man in Reno. Please stop singing. 1.3167 0.04102 221 168 36 17
2007 So you say your mother was advised not to let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3167 0.03897 221 164 44 13
2008 No pressure, but perhaps we could we use words this session? 1.3167 0.03735 221 161 50 10
2009 When did you begin to suspect that the little dogies' misfortune was connected to your own sense of well-being? 1.3167 0.03897 221 164 44 13
2010 "Let's pick up with that verse next week, Sue." 1.3167 0.03686 240 177 50 13
2011 How about we take a break from the music, and you rustle us up some grub? 1.3166 0.04422 199 153 29 17
2012 I personally don’t mind these longer sessions, but your bills will be much lower if you just talk. 1.3166 0.04000 199 146 43 10
2013 So what evidence can you offer to support your notion that the times are a changin? 1.3166 0.04186 199 149 37 13
2014 I need more than “Oh lonesome me” to work with. 1.3165 0.03933 218 162 43 13
2015 So, you have seldom heard a discouraging word? 1.3165 0.03933 218 162 43 13
2016 Shall we explore why the little dogie did not want to git along? 1.3165 0.03878 218 161 45 12
2017 Are there any country/western tunes that are strictly instrumental? 1.3165 0.03933 218 162 43 13
2018 And so your woman did not done left you. 1.3165 0.03717 237 175 49 13
2019 Rusty, I think there are some discouraging words not being heard in this room. 1.3165 0.03765 237 176 47 14
2020 How long have you wanted to get along with your little doggy? 1.3163 0.04291 196 148 34 14
2021 No, Mr. Sanchez. Sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.3163 0.04291 196 148 34 14
2022 So, your marriage is fine and your dog is alive and well...what's your problem? 1.3163 0.03914 215 159 44 12
2023 When did you first notice your relationship was going off key? 1.3163 0.04077 215 162 38 15
2024 If I understood you correctly, you were madder than a wet hen at a scrambled egg breakfast. 1.3163 0.03802 215 157 48 10
2025 Okay, let's start from the top. 1.3163 0.03969 215 160 42 13
2026 And your mother made you play the violin for how long? 1.3163 0.04024 215 161 40 14
2027 Try this: 'Oedipal pain / Will break your heart / You're one sick guy / And not that smart.'" 1.3163 0.04183 215 164 34 17
2028 Yes, sometimes a guitar is a guitar 1.3162 0.03495 234 168 58 8
2029 So why do you think you’re travelin’ down that lonesome road again all alone? 1.3161 0.04014 193 141 43 9
2030 No, I wasn't suggesting you were homeless when I said you were deranged...... 1.3161 0.04399 193 147 31 15
2031 You stopped drinking, found your truck, and got re-married? 1.3160 0.04063 212 159 39 14
2032 I'm sorry to say I don't do couple's therapy. 1.3160 0.03951 212 157 43 12
2033 I'm thinking you'd be better off in group therapy 1.3160 0.03777 212 154 49 9
2034 Have you tried rhinestones? 1.3160 0.03894 212 156 45 11
2035 Mammas don’t let your babies grow up to be therapists 1.3160 0.04117 212 160 37 15
2036 I know what your problem is. You're left-handed. 1.3160 0.03879 231 173 43 15
2037 Yes,I've heard that one before. 1.3160 0.03830 231 172 45 14
2038 Well Tex I think in our current political environment,singing Don’t Fence Me In at the Border Control annual BBQ may be bit dangerous why don’t you just sing Home On The Range and call it a day. 1.3160 0.03830 231 172 45 14
2039 Well, it might not be your home anymore, but you do have a range of issues. 1.3158 0.03986 190 138 44 8
2040 This prescription should make it more like the Mild West. 1.3158 0.03930 209 154 44 11
2041 So your dog died, your truck broke down and your wife left with your best friend. 1.3158 0.03864 228 170 44 14
2042 Oh, I do understand. It is a bitch that nothing rhymes with 'Jungian'. 1.3158 0.03751 209 151 50 8
2043 So you never heard a discouraging word, and the skies were not cloudy all day? 1.3158 0.03989 209 155 42 12
2044 Okay, so the wife, trailer, and truck are accounted for, but could you tell me more about your dog's disappearance? 1.3158 0.03989 209 155 42 12
2045 So when you said 'yippie-i-o ki yay', what did she do? 1.3158 0.03913 228 171 42 15
2046 See you aren't alone...the song is also stuck in my head. 1.3156 0.03898 225 168 43 14
2047 Is your horse jealous of all four-legged creatures or just the deer and the antelope? 1.3155 0.04086 206 154 39 13
2048 It sounds like the trails haven’t been that happy since we last met. 1.3155 0.04027 206 153 41 12
2049 You know any Zeppelin? 1.3155 0.04311 206 158 31 17
2050 So you blame your Mama for letting you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3155 0.04256 206 157 33 16
2051 So your mama let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3155 0.04143 206 155 37 14
2052 Looks like your problem started when you decided to play a right handed guitar left handed. 1.3153 0.03829 222 164 46 12
2053 And then the super-ego joins in on the chorus... 1.3153 0.03934 222 166 42 14
2054 Come, on! Really? They all left you? The wife, the dog, the horse, the mistress, the cat, the cow, the goat, the kids, etc. And I suppose it's not your fault? 1.3151 0.03753 219 160 49 10
2055 So, what's your first memory of people saying, 'Does not play well with others?' ". 1.3151 0.03970 219 164 41 14
2056 Lately, I’ve just felt out of tune. 1.3151 0.03970 219 164 41 14
2057 You see, doctor, it all started with a drink...a truck... a woman... and a dog. 1.3150 0.04046 200 148 41 11
2058 So what else do you fret over? 1.3149 0.03735 235 174 48 13
2059 Now that we've heard about your home on the range, I'd like you to put down the guitar and try to focus on reality. 1.3149 0.03735 235 174 48 13
2060 If you played your song backwards, your wife and dog might come back. 1.3147 0.04451 197 152 28 17
2061 That's not the saddest song I've ever heard. 1.3147 0.03892 197 143 46 8
2062 Why do YOU think the only song you sing is "Mama don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys"? 1.3147 0.04023 197 145 42 10
2063 Your life story sounds suspiciously like a Johnny Cash song. 1.3147 0.03825 197 142 48 7
2064 Listen, sometimes a 'guitar' is just a guitar. 1.3147 0.03912 232 175 41 16
2065 I see this has struck a chord with you. 1.3147 0.03912 232 175 41 16
2066 More like “Home on Deranged” if you ask me. 1.3147 0.03864 232 174 43 15
2067 When did you realize you couldn't let go of your guitar? 1.3144 0.04193 194 145 37 12
2068 I see our last session struck a chord with you. 1.3144 0.04256 194 146 35 13
2069 I suggest you get back to your home on the range. 1.3144 0.04129 194 144 39 11
2070 Tell me more about those lonesome feelings. 1.3143 0.04029 210 157 40 13
2071 Yes, but how do you Really feel about loosing your gun, your dog, your pickup and your girlfriend? 1.3143 0.03972 210 156 42 12
2072 So your baby done left you and your mama's gone and hitched a train. How does that make you feel? 1.3140 0.03769 207 150 49 8
2073 Perhaps your friends simply didn’t grow up singing “I Feel Pretty” as a campfire singalong. 1.3140 0.04011 207 154 41 12
2074 You are a complex case because there is no such thing as a “normal” cowboy. 1.3140 0.03769 207 150 49 8
2075 You say you’re lonesome...go on. 1.3140 0.03707 207 149 51 7
2076 SING THE FIRST THING THAT COMES TO MIND. 1.3140 0.04069 207 155 39 13
2077 So he was strumming your face with his fingers. Then what happened? 1.3139 0.04021 223 169 38 16
2078 Let’s go back to your days in Times Square. Do you miss being naked? 1.3139 0.03919 223 167 42 14
2079 We've been through that part...you're lonesome. 1.3137 0.04109 204 153 38 13
2080 If you don't mind, let's go back to the first verse. 1.3136 0.04109 220 168 35 17
2081 Let’s talk more about your mother and the F chord. 1.3136 0.04007 220 166 39 15
2082 All fashion trends end sometime, Mr. Lauren.” 1.3136 0.03769 236 176 46 14
2083 So I gather your mood is more yippee ki-no than yippe ki-yay? 1.3134 0.03967 201 148 43 10
2084 NEVER was heard a discouraging word? 1.3134 0.03992 217 163 40 14
2085 You will never find peace in a minor key. 1.3134 0.03992 217 163 40 14
2086 But how does your ex-wife wrecking your truck and killing your dog really make you feel? 1.3134 0.04045 217 164 38 15
2087 Hmm...very interesting. You went directly from C to E7. Can you say more about that? 1.3132 0.04378 182 137 33 12
2088 So, Butch, what is holding you back from becoming a "cowman"? 1.3131 0.04132 198 148 38 12
2089 So your wife left you for your best friend, your dog died, the bank wants your house and you backed your truck into your still? 1.3131 0.04006 198 146 42 10
2090 So it's the dogies' misfortune and none of your own? 1.3131 0.03748 214 156 49 9
2091 OK, your dog died and your girl left you, anything new? 1.3130 0.03785 230 171 46 13
2092 Tell me more about these "little doggies" you can't get along with. 1.3130 0.03981 230 175 38 17
2093 Let’s home in on the range of emotions you’re feeling. 1.3128 0.03899 211 156 44 11
2094 So to review, your best dog died, your cow's gone dry, and your woman don't love you no more. 1.3128 0.04013 211 158 40 13
2095 Okay, let's get back to that part about your mama - in G this time. 1.3128 0.03781 211 154 48 9
2096 While it's true that your wife left you for your best friend and they took your truck, there are still positive aspects to your situation." 1.3125 0.03434 256 187 58 11
2097 And when did you realize you were in love with your horse? 1.3125 0.04165 208 158 35 15
2098 If you keep insisting that you are an Old Cow Hand from the Rio Grande, then we will get no where. 1.3125 0.03771 240 180 45 15
2099 You need to stop fretting, cowboy. 1.3125 0.03583 224 162 54 8
2100 You say JOHN WAYNE appeared in a dream and told you to go western ,Mr Silverstein? 1.3125 0.04005 224 170 38 16
2101 Who was this "little dogie" and why did you want it to git along? 1.3125 0.04165 208 158 35 15
2102 I'm just suggesting that you seemed happier as a disco artist." 1.3125 0.04109 208 157 37 14
2103 So, out in the West Texas town of El Paso, you fell in love with a Mexican girl. 1.3122 0.03834 221 164 45 12
2104 Let's talk about your dad--perhaps something from the B-side of your album? 1.3122 0.03940 221 166 41 14
2105 Let me understand, did the episodes of depression and insomnia begin when your wife left you for your best friend; your blood hound died, or.your pick-up truck was stolen. 1.3122 0.03780 221 163 47 11
2106 and why do you think you "feel" home on the range? 1.3122 0.03973 205 152 42 11
2107 Why do you think your choices led to your wife leaving you and taking your truck and dog? 1.3122 0.04033 205 153 40 12
2108 If you want to play lonely songs, go ahead. It's your 50 minutes. 1.3122 0.04129 189 140 39 10
2109 And why have you never named your horse? 1.3120 0.03577 250 185 52 13
2110 It’s sturm und drang not strum! 1.3120 0.03837 250 191 40 19
2111 You played your guitar and your guitar played you. Go on. 1.3120 0.03537 234 170 55 9
2112 And does your guitar feel the same way about you? 1.3119 0.03868 218 162 44 12
2113 So, you can't think of a word that rhymes with jilt? How about guilt? 1.3119 0.03813 218 161 46 11
2114 I have no clue what rhymes with 'chaise lounge.' 1.3119 0.04012 202 150 41 11
2115 You can repeat it a 100 more times, but I just don't understand how the deer and antelope screwed up your marriage. 1.3117 0.04013 231 177 36 18
2116 Can you identify anything particular that makes you think you are in the wrong place at the wrong time? 1.3117 0.03670 231 170 50 11
2117 So how did it make you feel when the little dogie didn’t “git along”? 1.3117 0.04106 231 179 32 20
2118 And why do you think you want a home where the antelope roam? 1.3116 0.03904 215 160 43 12
2119 Yes, it's quite natural to want to escape this cloud hanging over you and run away to a place where seldom is heard a discouraging word. 1.3116 0.03725 199 143 50 6
2120 As I suspected, your mother let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.3116 0.04114 199 149 38 12
2121 No, The Low-Down Little Dogie Blues isn't actually recognized in the DSM-5, so this session is not covered by your insurance. 1.3115 0.03681 244 182 48 14
2122 So, last week we were talking about your troubles on the ol' Chisholm trail. 1.3113 0.04161 212 162 34 16
2123 Do you know, 'I'm so lonesome I could cry'? 1.3113 0.03646 212 153 52 7
2124 Your pickup truck will never love you back Clyde. 1.3113 0.04107 212 161 36 15
2125 It would be better at your next appointment if your horse "Old Betsy" came with you so we could get her side of it too. 1.3113 0.03997 212 159 40 13
2126 I see ... did your baby leave you before or after your dog died? 1.3113 0.04107 212 161 36 15
2127 If you play "My Analyst Told Me" one more time, I'm stopping the session immediately. 1.3113 0.03940 212 158 42 12
2128 And how do you feel when your guitar gently weeps? 1.3112 0.04093 196 146 39 11
2129 ...and why does Little Doggy have to get along? 1.3112 0.04028 196 145 41 10
2130 So even with a 10 gallon hat, the kids still called you Shorty... 1.3112 0.03617 241 178 51 12
2131 But that’s the point! You are a singing cowboy. 1.3111 0.03733 225 166 48 11
2132 We need to dive deeper with regards to the deer and the antelope. 1.3110 0.03978 209 156 41 12
2133 The depression will lift when you learn the song backwards. Your girl will come back, your horse will come back ... 1.3110 0.03920 209 155 43 11
2134 And how did you feel about this "little dogey"? 1.3109 0.03836 238 180 42 16
2135 Let's revisit the one about the Jung cowboy... 1.3109 0.03789 238 179 44 15
2136 And when you walked out on the streets of Loredo, what exactly did you see 1.3109 0.03934 193 141 44 8
2137 I think these train robberies are a cry for help. 1.3109 0.04069 193 143 40 10
2138 Now what makes you so certain your mama didn’t want you to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3109 0.04002 193 142 42 9
2139 You won’t want to hear this, but you are going to have to quit him. 1.3109 0.04326 193 147 32 14
2140 I see A Major depression whereas you C Minor with A flat affect. 1.3108 0.03819 222 165 45 12
2141 Your brother's horse was called Lightning. Your horse was Buttermilk. And how did that make you feel? 1.3108 0.03819 222 165 45 12
2142 Tell me how you felt after your wife left on your horse with your dog. 1.3108 0.04077 222 170 35 17
2143 There's nothing to fret about. 1.3108 0.04027 222 169 37 16
2144 This time, could we skip the extended dance version? 1.3108 0.03740 251 190 44 17
2145 Your mother done did you wrong you say? 1.3107 0.03896 206 152 44 10
2146 c Can you tell me what you're fretting about? 1.3107 0.04246 206 158 32 16
2147 I don't know what your ex told you, but this is NOT a guitar lesson. 1.3107 0.04189 206 157 34 15
2148 You may need couples therapy or you might just try tuning it. 1.3106 0.03627 235 173 51 11
2149 Still feeling out of tune? 1.3106 0.03822 235 177 43 15
2150 Have you considered singing, you know, happy songs? 1.3106 0.03676 235 174 49 12
2151 Before we begin Tex, Could you move down wind a little? 1.3105 0.03814 248 189 41 18
2152 So, are you more at home on the range, or the Bronx? 1.3103 0.04115 203 153 37 13
2153 You know Lefty, punching a cow never solves anything. 1.3103 0.04174 203 154 35 14
2154 This lonesome cowboy thing is getting a little old. 1.3103 0.03934 203 150 43 10
2155 This actually isn't the type of dis-chord I specialize in. 1.3103 0.03934 203 150 43 10
2156 Say more about your cello envy. 1.3103 0.04044 232 179 34 19
2157 And what does E-I-E-I-O mean to you? 1.3103 0.03707 232 172 48 12
2158 What makes you think Ol’ Paint doesn’t love you? 1.3103 0.03657 232 171 50 11
2159 Yes even cowgirls get the blues, but we are here to talk about your feelings. 1.3102 0.03758 245 185 44 16
2160 A guitar is never just a guitar. 1.3102 0.03833 216 160 45 11
2161 What I find very interesting is that in your songs you don't refer to yourself as a 'cowman'. Why do you think that is? 1.3102 0.03888 216 161 43 12
2162 She super-glued what? 1.3102 0.03888 216 161 43 12
2163 A little high strung? 1.3102 0.03943 216 162 41 13
2164 And why is it, do you think, that you find the word "seldom" so discouraging? 1.3100 0.03528 229 166 55 8
2165 I sometimes feel like a Lonesome Polecat myself, Tex. 1.3100 0.03889 229 173 41 15
2166 So you're just gonna let your guitar do the talking? 1.3100 0.03843 200 146 46 8
2167 Let's talk more about these "little dogies" that you keep referencing. 1.3100 0.03972 200 148 42 10
2168 Next time I ask about payment, I trust the answer will not be blowin' in the wind. 1.3097 0.04120 226 175 32 19
2169 Where did you say home is? 1.3097 0.03719 226 167 48 11
2170 No, I wouldn't say your Mama is to blame for you growing up to be a cowboy. 1.3097 0.03874 226 170 42 14
2171 Other than being a "Lonesome Cowboy", what else seems to be bothering you? 1.3097 0.03925 226 171 40 15
2172 So you ar saying that you are so lonesome you could die? 1.3096 0.03946 197 145 43 9
2173 So you are mad at your mama because she let her baby grow up to be a cowboy. It's time to get over it! 1.3096 0.03776 239 180 44 15
2174 You're depressed because you can't ride a horse, you can't rope a steer and you definitely can't play the guitar. Maybe it's time to give up the cowboy life and consider a career change. 1.3095 0.03962 210 157 41 12
2175 No, I reckon I don't. 1.3095 0.03845 210 155 45 10
2176 So when did you first find yourself attracted to little dowgies? 1.3094 0.03678 265 202 44 19
2177 Let me get this straight "if my phone don't ring, I'll know its you" ? 1.3094 0.03960 223 169 39 15
2178 A discouraging word was heard after all. 1.3094 0.03857 223 167 43 13
2179 Well, you clearly didn't listen to your mother. Let's start there. 1.3093 0.03760 236 177 45 14
2180 Any chance we can continue our sessions without the yodeling? 1.3093 0.03984 194 143 42 9
2181 Tell me about these 'dogies.' Why do you feel they must 'git along' and where do you think they have to go? 1.3093 0.04244 194 147 34 13
2182 I'd like to move you from an F-flat to a C-sharp. 1.3093 0.04116 194 145 38 11
2183 Yezz I zee- not cloudy all day- never a discouraging verd… Pleaze go on..I tink ve’re finally onto someting 1.3092 0.04058 207 156 38 13
2184 Actually, when seldom is heard a discouraging word, it's quite natural for one to find it hard to write a country-western song. 1.3092 0.04172 207 158 34 15
2185 Maybe so, Lefty, but sometimes a guitar is just a guitar. 1.3092 0.04283 207 160 30 17
2186 So your Mom also gently weeps? 1.3091 0.03729 220 162 48 10
2187 Can you riff on that a bit more, I think we’re getting somewhere. 1.3091 0.03838 220 164 44 12
2188 So, your wife left you for a jazz singer. How does that make you feel? 1.3091 0.04049 220 168 36 16
2189 Tell me more about these discouraging words you seem to be hearing since you moved to the city. 1.3090 0.03743 233 174 46 13
2190 No, I do not 'sing along' with my patients. It inflames the transference. 1.3088 0.03978 204 152 41 11
2191 And how did it make you feel when she left with your dog and your truck? 1.3088 0.04039 204 153 39 12
2192 You've got to let it go, home, home is not on the range anymore. 1.3088 0.03978 204 152 41 11
2193 I see...so you’ve frequently heard a discouraging word? 1.3088 0.03928 217 163 41 13
2194 That's our time, and by the way, do you do birthdays?" 1.3088 0.03818 217 161 45 11
2195 One the phone, when you said you were more at home on the range, I thought you meant you were a gourmet chef 1.3087 0.03674 230 170 49 11
2196 We've heard about your dog, your truck, and your various ex-wives. Now let's hear about your mother. 1.3086 0.03776 243 184 43 16
2197 No, you can't change the song so that Mama won't let her babies grow up to be therapists." 1.3085 0.04017 201 150 40 11
2198 Let's explore how it makes you feel when mommas DO let their babies grow up to be cowboys. 1.3085 0.03955 201 149 42 10
2199 OK, so your wife died, your dog ran away, and your truck was stolen. Now let’s discuss the bad things that happened this week. 1.3084 0.03909 214 160 42 12
2200 You can sing a little faster. I charge by the hour." 1.3084 0.04074 214 163 36 15
2201 Did your mother ever say "Yippie Ki Yi Yah"? 1.3084 0.04020 214 162 38 14
2202 Jeb, something tells me this wasn't your first rodeo. 1.3084 0.04020 214 162 38 14
2203 You're out of tune. 1.3084 0.03809 227 170 44 13
2204 When did you first notice you'd stopped grinnin'? 1.3084 0.03757 227 169 46 12
2205 You're telling me your self-driving truck left you too? 1.3084 0.03910 227 172 40 15
2206 So, in spite of the bison coming and going at all hours, you’ve characterized your childhood home as a playful, encouraging, and sunny environment. 1.3081 0.04179 185 138 37 10
2207 Let's start with that last line.. “I’ve been flushed from the bathroom of your heart.” 1.3081 0.04303 198 152 31 15
2208 Perhaps you should start with a ballad about your childhood 1.3081 0.04120 198 149 37 12
2209 I think you've come a long way since your time with the hedge fund 1.3081 0.03945 211 158 41 12
2210 Get along little doggie, you're time's up. 1.3081 0.04113 211 161 35 15
2211 How long have you been feeling lonesome? 1.3080 0.03894 224 169 41 14
2212 How long have you been stressing over this girl, Clementine? 1.3080 0.03737 224 166 47 11
2213 But why do you think the buffalo roam? 1.3080 0.03945 224 170 39 15
2214 ...I'm sure Freud himself would take your job and shove it. 1.3080 0.03699 237 177 47 13
2215 Did your wife leave you before or after your dog died? 1.3077 0.03602 221 161 52 8
2216 I think your problem may be that your mama let you grow up to be a cowboy! 1.3077 0.03865 208 154 44 10
2217 Let's explore that a little bit. Exactly what do you mean by yippee i oh ki yay? 1.3077 0.04162 195 147 36 12
2218 Y'know, I'm getting a little tired of life on the range. Let's talk about your mother. 1.3077 0.03779 234 176 44 14
2219 Nice try, but the song is not "I walk the borderline." 1.3077 0.03804 208 153 46 9
2220 I don't think music therapy will help if you can't play. 1.3077 0.03930 221 167 40 14
2221 Considering that you were born, raised and lived your entire life in Manhattan, I'd call it Dixie delusional disorder. 1.3077 0.03769 221 164 46 11
2222 I see your problem. You are one of those men overly obsessed with the g-string. 1.3077 0.03769 221 164 46 11
2223 It's your G string. It's flat. 1.3077 0.03968 234 180 36 18
2224 How did you git along with your little doggie? 1.3077 0.04041 208 157 38 13
2225 Can you tell me about your recent heartbreak again? That was a good one. 1.3074 0.03811 231 174 43 14
2226 Well, sometimes the things we think don’t make a heap of never mind reveal themselves to be the very things that do make a heap of never mind. 1.3074 0.03660 231 171 49 11
2227 Tell me a little bit more about the dog, the truck and the cheating wife 1.3073 0.04071 218 167 35 16
2228 Once more, but with feeling. 1.3073 0.04071 218 167 35 16
2229 Sounds like this Patsy Cline's got you pegged. 1.3073 0.03858 218 163 43 12
2230 Rule #1: Just lie back and play whatever comes into your head. 1.3073 0.03962 205 153 41 11
2231 There must be some other way to tell me how you feel. 1.3073 0.03776 205 150 47 8
2232 Looks like you have a fret or two. 1.3070 0.03895 228 173 40 15
2233 Next session we ought to revisit the absence of discouraging words in your childhood recollections. 1.3070 0.03585 228 167 52 9
2234 But how did it make you feel when your best friend stole your truck and ran away with your wife? 1.3070 0.03691 228 169 48 11
2235 What finally happened to your dog? 1.3070 0.03845 228 172 42 14
2236 So your little dogies don't get along. How do you feel about that? 1.3070 0.03638 228 168 50 10
2237 No matter what the boys in your band say, left-handedness itself is no longer considered a sign of mental disorder. 1.3070 0.03743 228 170 46 12
2238 Have you tried auto-tune? 1.3070 0.03543 215 155 54 6
2239 It sounds like she's stringing you along. 1.3070 0.03837 215 160 44 11
2240 It’s just... I feel guilty continuing to play while my guitar gently weeps. 1.3070 0.03949 215 162 40 13
2241 It'll be ok. Sadness and depression is what gives both of our jobs purpose. Then we laugh all the way to the bank. 1.3069 0.04061 202 152 38 12
2242 Did your mother ever explain why she didn’t want you to be a cowboy? 1.3069 0.03811 202 148 46 8
2243 So you're angry your mother let you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3069 0.04122 202 153 36 13
2244 What else can you tell me about this home on the range? 1.3067 0.03828 225 169 43 13
2245 Play "Free Bird" 1.3067 0.03930 225 171 39 15
2246 Great, now I'll have that song stuck in my head all day. 1.3067 0.03879 225 170 41 14
2247 You need to understand that the buffalo are farmed for meat, and the deer have moved to the suburbs. 1.3067 0.03669 225 166 49 10
2248 I know you are depressed but just because you lost your dog, wife, kids, house and truck broke down, doesn't make you a country singer 1.3066 0.04042 212 161 37 14
2249 You seem to be singing the same old song. 1.3066 0.03634 212 154 51 7
2250 When did you first realize you were an absolutely horrible guitarist? 1.3065 0.04163 199 151 35 13
2251 Let's pick up with when Mama tried. 1.3064 0.03667 235 175 48 12
2252 You think you’re lonesome, I sit here hour after hour with no one who understands me. 1.3063 0.03914 222 168 40 14
2253 and when the little doggie didn’t get along, how did you feel? 1.3062 0.03789 209 154 46 9
2254 Referring to your boss as 'Trailpartner' rather than 'Trailmaster' is actually a significant breakthrough. 1.3062 0.03665 209 152 50 7
2255 Let's take it from Bar 6 of the Refrain..... 1.3062 0.04024 209 158 38 13
2256 So you were playing on the road again or On The Road Again? 1.3061 0.04016 196 146 40 10
2257 Not to utter a discouraging word, but . . . 1.3061 0.04016 196 146 40 10
2258 So, why do you think the dove was lonesome? 1.3060 0.03942 232 178 37 17
2259 Half off your next session if your next personality doesn’t sing. 1.3060 0.03894 232 177 39 16
2260 So you think all the cows really love your songs, especially Gladys. 1.3060 0.03647 232 172 49 11
2261 I think a 20 milligram dose will be effective for that achy breaky heart. 1.3060 0.03490 232 169 55 8
2262 Would you say you actually feel "home" on the range? 1.3059 0.03788 219 163 45 11
2263 I just feel as though I've yee'd my last haw 1.3059 0.03950 219 166 39 14
2264 Listen, we both know that you are not an old cow hand and you are not from the Rio Grande. 1.3059 0.03788 219 163 45 11
2265 Where the f**k is Galveston? 1.3059 0.03950 219 166 39 14
2266 Have you ever considered that you might be the 'tumbling tumbleweed'? 1.3058 0.03761 206 151 47 8
2267 After you girlfriend left you, your truck broke down and your dog died, what happened? 1.3058 0.04121 206 157 35 14
2268 So, what I hear you singing is, your girl has come home, your truck is humming, and your dog just had puppies. Is this some sort of joke? 1.3058 0.04345 206 161 27 18
2269 Tell me more about these lonesome days and gamblin’ ways. 1.3058 0.03498 242 178 54 10
2270 Tell me more about these discouraging words and cloudy skies. 1.3057 0.04251 193 147 33 13
2271 Not to minimize your pain, but isn't it common, in your line of work, for a man’s two-timing spouse to shoot his vigilant dog and run off with his faithful horse in his newly washed truck? 1.3057 0.03921 193 142 43 8
2272 Your pickup truck seems to be a recurring theme. 1.3057 0.03625 229 169 50 10
2273 Yes, Mr. President, but I don’t think singing, “La Cucaracha” and wearing a mustache will get them to vote for you. 1.3057 0.03880 229 174 40 15
2274 What else do you remember besides the Alamo? 1.3056 0.03822 216 161 44 11
2275 So, tell me more of this home where the buffalo roam... 1.3056 0.03878 216 162 42 12
2276 Mr McCartney, you're a left handed guitarist and the similarities stop there, we have to address other issues. 1.3056 0.03878 216 162 42 12
2277 I wish I knew how to quit you. 1.3054 0.04279 203 157 30 16
2278 And your mama did let her babies grow up to be cowboys? 1.3054 0.04044 203 153 38 12
2279 True enough, last week you did say you would refrain. 1.3054 0.04044 203 153 38 12
2280 Deer and antelope? 1.3054 0.04044 203 153 38 12
2281 How seldom was that "discouraging word?" 1.3053 0.03708 226 168 47 11
2282 ...so when did you first suspect it was out of tune? 1.3053 0.03708 226 168 47 11
2283 I'm still a-pickin', but I ain't a-grinnin' no more, Doc. 1.3053 0.04165 190 143 36 11
2284 Please, could you stop singing "Home on the Deranged" 1.3052 0.03914 213 160 41 12
2285 I've never seen you pickin' AND grinnin'. Tell me about that. 1.3052 0.03970 213 161 39 13
2286 I don't want to do another duet. 1.3051 0.03846 236 180 40 16
2287 Maybe you should go back to using your guns Billy, you'd do less damage. 1.3049 0.04052 223 172 34 17
2288 Do you know any songs that aren’t about being lonesome out on the range. I’m getting depressed. 1.3049 0.03847 223 168 42 13
2289 Understanding that the trusty pickup represents your father is a real breakthrough 1.3049 0.03631 223 164 50 9
2290 For once could we try a visualization exercise without a pick-up truck, a dying dog or beer? 1.3049 0.03951 223 170 38 15
2291 And the little dogie won't git along? 1.3048 0.03833 210 156 44 10
2292 And this "jingle jangle jingle", it made you angry? 1.3048 0.03833 210 156 44 10
2293 It’s perfectly normal to be depressed when you’ve lost your dog, your girlfriend, and your good old Stetson in the same week. 1.3048 0.03773 210 155 46 9
2294 Tell me more about the time you first plucked Miss Mabelline. 1.3047 0.03832 233 177 41 15
2295 Do you think you would have benefitted from hearing discouraging words more than just seldomly? 1.3047 0.03734 233 175 45 13
2296 And you still think you can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant? 1.3047 0.03582 233 172 51 10
2297 You're not sure that you're still over her, she picked a fine time to leave you, she's always on your mind...forget therapy, you should be writing country songs! 1.3046 0.03867 197 145 44 8
2298 It's on the range, yes, but does it feel like home? 1.3045 0.03718 220 163 47 10
2299 And your mother, did she spend a lot of time at home, home on the range? 1.3045 0.03882 220 166 41 13
2300 ...And that’s how I lost my dog and my truck in the same day. 1.3045 0.03935 220 167 39 14
2301 Call it what you want, but I'm hearing the blues. 1.3045 0.03987 220 168 37 15
2302 I say "whoopie ti-yi-yo", then you say,"get along little doggies" and so on until the hour is up,OK? 1.3045 0.03722 243 184 44 15
2303 So, Bob, how is retirement going? 1.3043 0.03808 207 153 45 9
2304 Elaborate on the being naked in Times Square dream. 1.3043 0.04272 207 161 29 17
2305 I'm hearing the same old song 1.3043 0.03865 230 175 40 15
2306 Let's get to the root of why you think it's ok to put your boots on my couch. 1.3043 0.03869 207 154 43 10
2307 And how did you feel when the little dogies didn't git along? 1.3043 0.04047 207 157 37 13
2308 Crazy, crazy to think I can cure you, crazy, crazy to think I could care... 1.3043 0.03865 230 175 40 15
2309 Sing the one about your wife again. 1.3042 0.03659 240 180 47 13
2310 You’re repeating yourself a lot. 1.3041 0.03971 217 165 38 14
2311 Last week we were talking about your Ma - I think its time to cut the chord 1.3041 0.03693 217 160 48 9
2312 When did you first notice you were singing the blues? 1.3041 0.03917 217 164 40 13
2313 What rhymes with Freud? 1.3041 0.04295 194 149 31 14
2314 ...on the other hand, sometimes a bandana is just a bandana. 1.3040 0.03533 227 166 53 8
2315 What do you really mean when you sing "Back in the Saddle Again"? 1.3039 0.03967 204 153 40 11
2316 Your dog died, your wife left you, but I hear you saying that your truck still runs great. 1.3039 0.03967 204 153 40 11
2317 Why do I have the feeling you aren't listening to me? 1.3039 0.03967 204 153 40 11
2318 But what are you really trying to say when you say yippie yi yo kayah? 1.3037 0.03954 214 162 39 13
2319 Your problem is that you're holding the guitar backwards. 1.3037 0.04117 214 165 33 16
2320 We've talked in previous sessions about your desire to become less picky. 1.3037 0.03784 214 159 45 10
2321 change that tune and you'll start to feel better 1.3037 0.03898 214 161 41 12
2322 How was life at home, home on the range? 1.3037 0.04009 214 163 37 14
2323 Yes. But mamas don't LET their babies grow up to be cowboys... 1.3037 0.03841 214 160 43 11
2324 Next time, please remove your boots. 1.3037 0.03841 214 160 43 11
2325 I know discouraging words can be hurtful. Have you considered moving back home on the range? 1.3036 0.03832 224 169 42 13
2326 This is the third session you've been stuck trying to find a rhyme for 'malaise.' I understand your desire to avoid clichés, but just this once, can't you call them the blues and move on? 1.3036 0.03935 224 171 38 15
2327 So, to summarize, you lost your gal, your dog ran away, and your pickup broke down. 1.3034 0.03818 234 178 41 15
2328 I think the transition to F major should come right there. 1.3034 0.03818 234 178 41 15
2329 So...your dog died, your truck broke down and the whiskey don't work like it used to. 1.3034 0.03769 234 177 43 14
2330 So how long have you been Willy Nelson? 1.3034 0.03620 234 174 49 11
2331 Have you ever wondered why you write so many songs about your mother? 1.3034 0.04350 178 135 32 11
2332 Now I know your wife done left you and your truck's broke, but can we talk about what's really bothering you? 1.3033 0.03818 211 157 44 10
2333 So you finally changed your G string and now she's complaining about the hat? 1.3033 0.03709 244 185 44 15
2334 My advice? Keep your day job. 1.3032 0.03813 221 166 43 12
2335 When I said you needed to "cowboy up," this isn't what I had in mind. 1.3032 0.03704 221 164 47 10
2336 After your wife left you and your pick-up wouldn't start, how did that make you feel? 1.3032 0.03919 221 168 39 14
2337 In my professional opinion your just a poor lonesome cowboy who’s a long way from home. 1.3032 0.03813 221 166 43 12
2338 And on a minor note, your B is flat.” 1.3032 0.03759 221 165 45 11
2339 I know you've "got friends in low places", but that doesn't make you a bad person. 1.3030 0.03383 231 167 58 6
2340 ......in conclusion, just another ten gallon hat on a two gallon head. 1.3030 0.03899 231 177 38 16
2341 We all have to ascertain for ourselves the meaning of "Come a ti yi yippee". 1.3030 0.03783 198 145 46 7
2342 It's a beautiful song. But we're here because it's about your horse. 1.3030 0.04045 198 149 38 11
2343 So, you're an old cowhand from the Rio Grande, you've recently lost your dog, and you've got friends in low places. May I ask where your ex-wives live? 1.3030 0.03701 231 173 46 12
2344 So tell me how your mother reacted when you left medical school to become a singing cowboy. 1.3030 0.04170 198 151 34 13
2345 Why do you think she’s comin’ ‘round the mountain? 1.3029 0.03853 208 155 43 10
2346 How do you feel about your gal havin' done left? 1.3029 0.03913 208 156 41 11
2347 You say your mother's name is Clementine? 1.3029 0.03853 208 155 43 10
2348 So, exactly when did you and Little Dogie start having trouble getting along? 1.3028 0.03503 251 187 52 12
2349 Why the G minor seventh? 1.3028 0.03956 218 166 38 14
2350 Roy, I truly want to know more about your lost sweetheart, your dead horse, and your rabid dog. But first, I want you to take just a moment . . . to tune that damned guitar. 1.3028 0.03956 218 166 38 14
2351 Would it help you if we sing together? 1.3028 0.03847 218 164 42 12
2352 I'm sensing some hostility here. Tune the damn guitar. 1.3026 0.04275 195 150 31 14
2353 Do you mind if I call my wife? She's a big fan. 1.3024 0.03764 205 151 46 8
2354 So it's your mother's fault that you're a gay Caballero? 1.3024 0.04128 205 157 34 14
2355 This is progress! Last week’s therapy was on horseback! 1.3023 0.03882 215 162 41 12
2356 You're high strung. 1.3023 0.03938 215 163 39 13
2357 You can't go on blaming it all on being left-handed. Jimi Hendrix did just fine for himself. 1.3023 0.03882 215 162 41 12
2358 So you lost your wife, pickup truck and dog, how does that make you feel? 1.3022 0.03817 225 170 42 13
2359 I need you to put down your device and concentrate on our session. 1.3022 0.03970 225 173 36 16
2360 Tell me a bit more about your relationship with these dogies. 1.3022 0.04137 182 136 37 9
2361 Would you say it all fell apart for you after you lost your woman, your dog, or your pickup? 1.3022 0.04281 182 138 33 11
2362 Now tell me why you dropped out of law school? 1.3022 0.04281 182 138 33 11
2363 I understand that 'little doagie' is a metaphor for the real problem. 1.3021 0.04193 192 146 34 12
2364 Mama tried. And how did that make you feel? 1.3020 0.04169 202 155 33 14
2365 How long have you felt soo loonesome? 1.3020 0.03798 202 149 45 8
2366 Tell me more about the burning ring of fire. 1.3020 0.03863 202 150 43 9
2367 Let's go with that. How does it feel to be in a home where the buffalo roam? 1.3019 0.03918 212 160 40 12
2368 And how does it make you feel to have lost your dog, your horse, your wife, and your house? 1.3019 0.03861 212 159 42 11
2369 So, when did you first start feeling like the alone ranger? 1.3019 0.03861 212 159 42 11
2370 Other than the buffalo roaming,any other early memories of your home? 1.3019 0.03975 212 161 38 13
2371 Sorry Mr. Clampitt, but sometimes 12 bars just ain't enough to treat the blues. 1.3019 0.03918 212 160 40 12
2372 So your home isn't where the buffalo roam, so what? 1.3018 0.03798 222 167 43 12
2373 OK, but suppose home wasn't on the range. 1.3018 0.04108 222 173 31 18
2374 So...you think your emotional support guitar is repelling women on first dates... Lets talk about that. 1.3017 0.03637 232 173 48 11
2375 Don't obsess over it. I'd say most people have never roped a steer cause they don't know how. 1.3015 0.03964 199 149 40 10
2376 I can't think of anything that rhymes with 'orange' either! 1.3015 0.04090 199 151 36 12
2377 Ever thought about putting it all down in a song? 1.3014 0.03897 209 157 41 11
2378 Yeah but cowboys are supposed to feel lonely. 1.3014 0.03955 209 158 39 12
2379 Now, can I hear the guitar's side of the story? 1.3014 0.03955 209 158 39 12
2380 If you can't ignore disparaging words you'll need to move out of the city and back to the range 1.3014 0.03777 219 164 44 11
2381 It's always the same old refrain. 1.3014 0.03832 219 165 42 12
2382 It's perfectly normal to like Gangsta rap. 1.3014 0.03721 219 163 46 10
2383 Bob, There is a big difference between a habit and a hobby. See you next week. 1.3014 0.03940 219 167 38 14
2384 And how long have you had this obsession with getting the little doggies along? 1.3014 0.03832 219 165 42 12
2385 Depressing lyric's are my bread and butter 1.3013 0.03719 229 172 45 12
2386 Actually, it's not sang-Freud. 1.3013 0.03667 229 171 47 11
2387 And how does it make you feel when your horse doesn't seem to enjoy your singing? 1.3013 0.03614 239 179 48 12
2388 Changing from a banjo on your knee to a guitar is only masking your condition. 1.3013 0.03414 239 175 56 8
2389 I would prefer a check or credit card. 1.3012 0.03563 249 187 49 13
2390 The blues again? 1.3012 0.03741 249 191 41 17
2391 To try to alleviate your depression, I’m prescribing an accordion. Three polkas a day, to start. I must be strict about this: NO tangos. 1.3010 0.04194 196 150 33 13
2392 So you never learned to tune it? 1.3010 0.03933 206 155 40 11
2393 No, but if you strum a few bars, I'll try to sing along. 1.3009 0.03867 216 163 41 12
2394 Give me a home where the labradors roam" is progress, Mr. Pecos. 1.3009 0.03754 216 161 45 10
2395 Yes, I understand. You're a businessman from New York, you go to a meeting in El Paso, and what happens next? 1.3009 0.03867 216 163 41 12
2396 Your wife ran away and left you, your horse is lame and the rain is soaking your saddle. Might you be singing the blues? 1.3009 0.03867 216 163 41 12
2397 And how did the deer and the antelope playing make you feel? 1.3009 0.04030 216 166 35 15
2398 Yes, but can we just once get beyond the lonesome wail of a train in the middle of the night, your wife leaving you, and your dog's death to get at what is really troubling you? 1.3009 0.03803 226 171 42 13
2399 Now tell me more about falling in love with your horse. 1.3009 0.03751 226 170 44 12
2400 Play it again, Sam. This time with more feeling. 1.3008 0.03883 236 182 37 17
2401 Move ’em on, ride ’em out, time is up, til' next week, rawhiiiiide…. 1.3008 0.03693 236 178 45 13
2402 What is your goal for therapy? To be happy or to write country music? 1.3005 0.04151 203 156 33 14
2403 Your neurotic fretting is more tolerable. 1.3005 0.03787 213 159 44 10
2404 No, I don't think comparing notes will help. 1.3005 0.04069 213 164 34 15
2405 Tell me more about ornery. 1.3005 0.03902 213 161 40 12
2406 And changing your name to Bradley Cooper will solve what exactly? 1.3004 0.03784 223 168 43 12
2407 How do you feel, that your mama wanted you to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.3004 0.03889 223 170 39 14
2408 In the first stanza you mention your daddy was a gambler. And in the chorus you acknowledge that you were born under a bad sign. But you titled the song ‘Lonesome, Lazy and Left-handed.’ It may be that you are dealing with an album. 1.3004 0.03724 233 176 44 13
2409 So it was your mother who took your rhinestones away? 1.3004 0.03724 233 176 44 13
2410 It’s not just your guitar that gently weeps. 1.3000 0.03871 220 167 40 13
2411 So when your wife left, your dog died, and your pickup truck was stolen... how exactly did you feel? 1.3000 0.03939 210 159 39 12
2412 So let's talk about those discouraging words you're hearing, and the cloudy skies you're seeing. 1.3000 0.03551 250 188 49 13
2413 So basically, you have all the country western songs troubles plus a prostate issue". 1.3000 0.03996 210 160 37 13
2414 When was your home on the range repossessed? 1.3000 0.03939 210 159 39 12
2415 I get the "git along" part, but what's a "dogie"? 1.3000 0.03822 210 157 43 10
2416 So she'll be comin' 'round the mountain, and yet never seems to come. Talk about your mother. 1.3000 0.03453 240 177 54 9
2417 Sounds like you're sick and tired of playing the same old song. 1.3000 0.04308 180 137 32 11
2418 Let's stop at 12 bars and come back to this refrain next week." 1.3000 0.03762 220 165 44 11
2419 No, Jeff, I don't want to hear 'The House of the Rising Sun' again. 1.3000 0.03924 220 168 38 14
2420 How did you FEEL when the skys turned to be cloudy all day? 1.3000 0.03650 220 163 48 9
2421 While your dog sounds like a very good dog, maybe we should get back to your mother. 1.2996 0.03802 247 191 38 18
2422 So, what more can you tell me about this achy breaky heart? 1.2996 0.03579 247 186 48 13
2423 Nope, she won’t be comin’ ‘round the mountain. 1.2996 0.03840 227 173 40 14
2424 Would it be less depressing in C? 1.2996 0.03577 227 168 50 9
2425 So, I understand you've come to see me about your fear of horses 1.2995 0.03796 207 154 44 9
2426 Do you know any happy songs? 1.2995 0.03857 207 155 42 10
2427 But you must realize your home is NOT on the range. 1.2995 0.03977 207 157 38 12
2428 Next personality please ! 1.2995 0.04035 207 158 36 13
2429 I'm afraid that we have to fence you in so you don't wander over yonder 1.2995 0.04093 207 159 34 14
2430 I'm not sure I can bill for sing-a-long therapy 1.2995 0.04176 197 151 33 13
2431 Lonesome cowpoke" my ass 1.2995 0.04176 197 151 33 13
2432 You're stuck because your dog didn't die, is that it? 1.2995 0.03985 197 148 39 10
2433 How frequently are hearing these discouraging words? 1.2995 0.04298 197 153 29 15
2434 That doesn't rhyme either. 1.2991 0.03661 234 176 46 12
2435 This may sound like a discouraging word, but a home filled with roaming buffaloes just isn't practical. 1.2991 0.03710 234 177 44 13
2436 Seldom was heard a discouraging word...how do you feel about that? 1.2991 0.03716 224 168 45 11
2437 Earl, I get it. Girlfriend left. Dog dead. Pickup broke. But, is this really all about your mother? 1.2991 0.03925 224 172 37 15
2438 Buffalo....roam - got it. Now tell me about your mother 1.2991 0.03830 214 161 42 11
2439 To dispel your feelings of claustrophobia , .... just think of Land ..lots of Land under starry skies above . 1.2991 0.03772 214 160 44 10
2440 I’m hoping you’ll get to the point where you don’t fret so much. 1.2991 0.03654 214 158 48 8
2441 How long have you been fixated on pickup trucks, whiskey and women who have left you? 1.2990 0.04134 204 157 33 14
2442 Okay, you’ve mastered the pickin’, now it’s time to work on your grinnin’. 1.2990 0.04344 194 151 28 15
2443 Play me one about your mom. 1.2990 0.04025 194 146 38 10
2444 What does 'home on the range' mean to you? 1.2990 0.03958 194 145 40 9
2445 Tell me more about your not feeling at home on the range. 1.2988 0.03637 241 182 46 13
2446 So, E minor chords give you the E-B-G-B's 1.2987 0.03792 231 176 41 14
2447 I noticed the songs about your mother are all in a minor key 1.2987 0.03841 231 177 39 15
2448 Would you repeat the part where you were abandoned at a Willie Nelson concert when you were 5 years old. 1.2987 0.03691 231 174 45 12
2449 Would you describe what you're feeling as 'lonesome'? 1.2986 0.03746 211 157 45 9
2450 My psychoanalysis reveals it’s all classic denial ... your truck is broke down, the wife has left you, and the whiskey ain’t workin no more. 1.2986 0.03806 211 158 43 10
2451 ...and how would you feel if I told you this 'home on the range' is actually inside you? 1.2985 0.04055 201 153 36 12
2452 Yes I know, you're an old cowhand. 1.2982 0.03723 228 172 44 12
2453 We’ve only got an hour, does this song have words? 1.2982 0.03723 228 172 44 12
2454 Ok, let's take the lyrics; "I'm so lonesome I could cry", what are you really trying to say 1.2982 0.03836 218 165 41 12
2455 Let’s go back to the beginning - when you were left on Earl Scruggs doorstep. 1.2982 0.03724 218 163 45 10
2456 Tell me more about this Bobby McGee fellow. 1.2982 0.03724 218 163 45 10
2457 I'm sorry, but Willie Nelson did "Crazy" better than anyone. 1.2981 0.03901 208 157 40 11
2458 And when you change key, how do you feel? 1.2981 0.03901 208 157 40 11
2459 Maybe you should avoid songs in a minor key. 1.2981 0.03780 208 155 44 9
2460 sorry to tell you: but it's either resolving your mother issues or living the cowboy blues...you can't have both. 1.2981 0.03841 208 156 42 10
2461 And how did her driving away in your favorite truck make you feel? 1.2981 0.04018 208 159 36 13
2462 When did you first have this dream about little doggies." 1.2980 0.03903 198 148 41 9
2463 You switched from the banjo... you're making good progress. 1.2979 0.03697 235 178 44 13
2464 Jeez, do any of your songs have lyrics that aren't a total downer 1.2979 0.04038 188 141 38 9
2465 So you're worried because everything isn't "bigger in Texas". 1.2979 0.04176 188 143 34 11
2466 Let's move past the pickup truck. 1.2978 0.03755 225 170 43 12
2467 For a travelin' kind of guy, you sure spend a lot of time on the couch. 1.2977 0.03757 215 161 44 10
2468 Talk a bit more about what happened on the Chisholm trail. 1.2977 0.03757 215 161 44 10
2469 If discouraging words are seldom heard, can you tell me what has been bothering you this week? 1.2977 0.03871 215 163 40 12
2470 Your momma wanted a doctor or lawyer or such. 1.2976 0.03622 205 150 49 6
2471 I would recommend against a song about falling in love with your horse. 1.2976 0.03877 205 154 41 10
2472 When did you start playing Rimsky-Korsakov 1.2976 0.04057 205 157 35 13
2473 That’s not really what I meant when I said ‘cowboy up’ Mr. Simpson 1.2976 0.04057 205 157 35 13
2474 Encore? Sure ... $200 an hour. 1.2975 0.03528 242 181 50 11
2475 You sound as if you have lost a fair bit of your range. 1.2975 0.03379 242 178 56 8
2476 Let's talk about your home on the range. Did the deer and the antelope bully you? 1.2974 0.04137 195 149 34 12
2477 Now, how about one about your mother? 1.2974 0.03678 232 175 45 12
2478 If you play 'On Top of Old Smokey' once more, you can find yourself another therapist. 1.2973 0.03841 222 169 40 13
2479 Git along little dogie is not really the answer we’re looking for. 1.2973 0.03787 222 168 42 12
2480 And why do you suppose everyone calls you "Lefty", Steve? 1.2973 0.03622 222 165 48 9
2481 Your mother let you you grow up to be a cowboy. How do you feel about that? 1.2972 0.03791 212 159 43 10
2482 Let's talk more about how your mama let you grow up this way. 1.2972 0.03907 212 161 39 12
2483 So the man in Reno did nothing to provoke you? 1.2972 0.03849 212 160 41 11
2484 Tell me more about why your mother didn't want you to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.2972 0.04020 212 163 35 14
2485 Ok Bill, let’s try it again from the top, perhaps with a little less whining about old dogs, horses and cold hearted women. 1.2971 0.03605 239 180 47 12
2486 So you believe the sky is not blue all day...? 1.2969 0.03709 229 173 44 12
2487 Have you considered playing it in major?" 1.2969 0.03709 229 173 44 12
2488 But he takes his clothes off and plays in Times Square with just his briefs and boots. What's your M.O.? 1.2969 0.03709 229 173 44 12
2489 No, Mr. Pickens. "Home on the Deranged" is not a good title. 1.2969 0.03958 229 178 34 17
2490 Your co-dependent relationship with your horse strikes a chord with me. 1.2969 0.03980 192 144 39 9
2491 Well, that takes care of where you came from, Tex. Now, how about telling me about your problem. 1.2968 0.03536 219 161 51 7
2492 Not bad, but your mother was right - you shouldn’t have dropped out of that accounting course 1.2968 0.03595 219 162 49 8
2493 So let's see... you're so lonesome you could cry. 1.2968 0.03653 219 163 47 9
2494 It gets lonely on the range. Sometimes cowboys have to kiss. 1.2968 0.03821 219 166 41 12
2495 Can we get beyond your love affair with your truck? 1.2968 0.03595 219 162 49 8
2496 Buffalo and deer, yes. But antelope are not endemic to North America. You’re thinking pronghorn. 1.2968 0.03766 219 165 43 11
2497 Are you taking my notes seriously?" (Caption composed by Owen Anderson, 8 yrs. old; caption transcribed by Emily Anderson, 42 yrs. old 1.2968 0.03821 219 166 41 12
2498 It’s called the Lonesome Road for a reason. 1.2967 0.04048 182 136 38 8
2499 We've established that your home was on the range. Let's narrow the focus a little bit. Tell me about your mother. 1.2967 0.03825 209 157 42 10
2500 On the plus side, I can think of plenty of words to rhyme with perphenazine and amitriptyline. 1.2967 0.04225 209 164 28 17
2501 Other than ‘Come a ki yi yippee yippee yi yippee yay,’ what comes to mind? 1.2967 0.03885 209 158 40 11
2502 So why do YOU believe your horse galloped off with another cowboy? 1.2966 0.03827 236 182 38 16
2503 Have you ever considered that there just may not be a good rhyme for fentanyl? 1.2965 0.04015 199 151 37 11
2504 Well, Blake, I guess that’s why they call it the blues. 1.2965 0.03951 199 150 39 10
2505 You’ve been singing “Get a long little doggie “ for years. Now that your dog did what you told him to do, what’s the problem? 1.2965 0.03740 226 171 43 12
2506 So, your home is on a range where the skies are cloudy all day, and where discouraging words are heard about buffalo that don't roam, and about deer and antelope that no longer play. Is that correct?" 1.2965 0.03740 226 171 43 12
2507 So far we’ve established that you’re A.) a ‘buckaroo' and B.) you’ve been 'done wrong.’ Please continue. 1.2965 0.03634 226 169 47 10
2508 So, you're the black sheep in a family of doctors and lawyers and such. 1.2963 0.03742 216 162 44 10
2509 ...and how did you feel when the buffalo roamed? 1.2963 0.03684 216 161 46 9
2510 I believe you may be mischaracterizing your negative attitude. I haven't heard a discouraging word yet. 1.2963 0.03856 216 164 40 12
2511 And these other two guitarreros – are they here right now? 1.2963 0.03684 216 161 46 9
2512 I can SEE by your outfit that you are a cowboy. 1.2961 0.03613 233 175 47 11
2513 Your mood is almost low enough to return to songwriting. 1.2961 0.03562 233 174 49 10
2514 You have to want to get your dog back, your truck back, your girl back, your horse back, your job back... 1.2961 0.03860 206 155 41 10
2515 I get paid by the hour so don't hold that note too long 1.2961 0.03981 206 157 37 12
2516 When did you first notice an urge for a home where the buffalo roam? 1.2961 0.03921 206 156 39 11
2517 Let's try it with a little less remorse. 1.2961 0.03921 206 156 39 11
2518 Nothing will get resolved, you are left handed. 1.2960 0.03719 223 168 44 11
2519 So Chief Justice Breyer, when did you decide to change careers? 1.2960 0.03930 223 172 36 15
2520 Please! Not another done somebody wrong song. 1.2960 0.03495 223 164 52 7
2521 I understand Blaze is your trusty steed, but I don’t think giving Uber drivers five stars would be a betrayal. 1.2960 0.03609 223 166 48 9
2522 And how is Poor Lonesome Me working out for you? 1.2960 0.03719 223 168 44 11
2523 We'll have you playing major chords in no time! 1.2959 0.04119 196 150 34 12
2524 When did you start having these feelings for little doggies? 1.2958 0.03834 213 161 41 11
2525 Sometimes, Tex, a little dogie is just a little dogie. 1.2958 0.03834 213 161 41 11
2526 Sometimes a bandana is just a bandana. 1.2958 0.03834 213 161 41 11
2527 Let’s go back and chat about the home where the buffalo roam. 1.2958 0.03775 213 160 43 10
2528 In most relationships, "No strings attached" is rarely attainable. 1.2958 0.03948 213 163 37 13
2529 And when you hang your head over and hear the wind blow, how does that make you feel? 1.2958 0.03775 213 160 43 10
2530 Tell me more about the good and then I’d like to move on to the ugly. 1.2958 0.03775 213 160 43 10
2531 Play the one about your mother again. 1.2958 0.03716 213 159 45 9
2532 Evidently, you're a picker not a grinner. 1.2958 0.04003 213 164 35 14
2533 Now that we've established that your truck broke down, your wife left and dog died, perhaps you can tell me about your feelings for your mother 1.2957 0.04201 186 142 33 11
2534 I take it verse two is about your mother? 1.2957 0.03796 230 176 40 14
2535 And how did it make you feel when your horse disparaged your music? 1.2956 0.03897 203 153 40 10
2536 'Them blues' is not a medically recognized term. 1.2956 0.03834 203 152 42 9
2537 Tell me more about this 'Clementine.' 1.2955 0.03581 220 163 49 8
2538 So, you let your babies grow up to be cowboys? 1.2954 0.03813 237 183 38 16
2539 Let's talk about your home and where you roam. 1.2954 0.03621 237 179 46 12
2540 The range just doesn’t feel like home anymore. 1.2954 0.03521 237 177 50 10
2541 Sometimes a dogie is just a dogie. 1.2953 0.03458 254 191 51 12
2542 ...and why, do you think, that you need these little dogies to git along? 1.2952 0.03985 210 161 36 13
2543 “So...in your day job...wearing a judicial robe feels like role playing?” 1.2952 0.03927 210 160 38 12
2544 Try to embrace your inner child, that boy named Sue. 1.2952 0.03562 210 154 50 6
2545 Can you give me the last line again. 1.2952 0.03927 210 160 38 12
2546 Perhaps sweet Sally overreacted when she called you an inconsiderate, self-indulgent excuse for a cowboy, HEY are you wearing spurs on my couch! 1.2952 0.03869 210 159 40 11
2547 Why do YOU think the buffalo want to roam? 1.2952 0.04042 210 162 34 14
2548 Do you take requests? 1.2952 0.03985 210 161 36 13
2549 But perhaps a nine-gallon hat is good enough. 1.2952 0.03566 227 169 49 9
2550 'I know it makes you feel better, but we can't have an audience here for every session' 1.2952 0.03673 227 171 45 11
2551 So Willie, how do you feel about your Mamma making you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.2952 0.03880 227 175 37 15
2552 Have you considered group? 1.2951 0.03598 244 185 46 13
2553 Do you have any songs that don't involve your mother? 1.2951 0.03736 244 188 40 16
2554 I understand, you’re a lonesome cowboy, what else is new? 1.2950 0.04060 200 153 35 12
2555 Well you and the horse you rode in on can pay for a second hour if you're going to use that kind of language in my office. 1.2950 0.04182 200 155 31 14
2556 Surely your dog, your girlfriend, and your truck didn’t ALL die at the same time! 1.2950 0.03804 200 149 43 8
2557 Your problem is you are holding the guitar the wrong way! 1.2949 0.03670 217 162 46 9
2558 Let's go back to when you were three years old and you met Roy Rogers. 1.2949 0.03784 217 164 42 11
2559 So, all day you face a barren waste without a taste of water...how might we cope with that challenge? 1.2949 0.03840 217 165 40 12
2560 Stop whining--that's why they call it the Blues. 1.2949 0.03784 217 164 42 11
2561 Sometimes a home on the range is just a home on the range. 1.2949 0.03840 217 165 40 12
2562 You seem to have unresolved issues with your Grammy. 1.2949 0.03670 217 162 46 9
2563 I think you need to accept that maybe people will know “the trouble you’ve seen” if you open up to them. 1.2949 0.03895 217 166 38 13
2564 I see a lack of empathy for the little dogie’s misfortune” 1.2949 0.03650 234 177 45 12
2565 Lets explore some deeper chords besides D,C and G. 1.2947 0.03526 207 151 51 5
2566 Just so you won’t be surprised, therapy with country singing doubles the fee. 1.2947 0.04023 207 159 35 13
2567 And how does your dogies not gittin along make you feel? 1.2947 0.04138 207 161 31 15
2568 Bill, help me understand; it appears you've really transformed from last week's interest in Bollywood. 1.2947 0.03965 207 158 37 12
2569 So,your mother let you grow up as a cowboy... 1.2947 0.04023 207 159 35 13
2570 Perhaps the range was more of an escape than a true home? 1.2946 0.03595 224 167 48 9
2571 You don't need a microphone. You're projecting enough already. 1.2946 0.03758 224 170 42 12
2572 Hang on, sing the chorus again - I have an idea. 1.2946 0.03595 224 167 48 9
2573 Take us back to your home and never hearing a discouraging word. 1.2946 0.03705 224 169 44 11
2574 And what comes up for you when I say, “where the deer and the antelope play?” 1.2946 0.03650 224 168 46 10
2575 I guess this next song will also be about your mother. 1.2946 0.03650 224 168 46 10
2576 Let me get this straight; You're old cow hand from the Rio Grande And you’re going to bawl if they build the wall. 1.2946 0.03811 224 171 40 13
2577 Let’s talk about your belief that your dog stole your pickup. 1.2944 0.04101 197 151 34 12
2578 So you’re saying Loraine done you wrong . 1.2944 0.04037 197 150 36 11
2579 But you told the little dogies to git along, right? 1.2944 0.03760 214 161 43 10
2580 What do you mean, you still got the blues? 1.2944 0.03702 214 160 45 9
2581 Again, sorry about your dog. Can we move beyond that? 1.2944 0.03760 214 161 43 10
2582 Tell me more why your “momma” didn’t want you to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.2944 0.03760 214 161 43 10
2583 You will never make any progress if you keep singing the same old song. 1.2944 0.03760 214 161 43 10
2584 Let's circle back on Willie Nelson and your mother. 1.2944 0.03681 231 175 44 12
2585 So you’ve lost your home and your range? 1.2941 0.04003 204 156 36 12
2586 So you say your whole life feels like a country-Western song—or just the divorce? 1.2941 0.03447 255 192 51 12
2587 So you were out in the West Texas town of El Paso and you fell in love with a Mexican girl. How did that make you feel? 1.2941 0.04180 204 159 30 15
2588 Just because you're reclining doesn't mean you're not a walking cliche. 1.2941 0.03880 204 154 40 10
2589 Before we move on, you should write down those lyrics. 1.2941 0.04003 204 156 36 12
2590 So, you're bitter about not being invited when the deer and the antelope play? 1.2941 0.03681 221 166 45 10
2591 The pickup truck must represent your mother. 1.2941 0.03568 221 164 49 8
2592 Has growing up as a boy named Sue affected your gender identity? 1.2941 0.04063 204 157 34 13
2593 While home on the range, how often did you hear a discouraging word? 1.2941 0.04180 204 159 30 15
2594 No, I can't tell you "where cowboys go when they die." 1.2941 0.03942 204 155 38 11
2595 I wouldn't sing about it if I were you 1.2939 0.03723 245 189 40 16
2596 So, there never was a horse like the Tennessee stud? 1.2939 0.03915 228 177 35 16
2597 These buffalo gals who dance by the light of the moon are just a figment of your imagination Clem. 1.2939 0.03552 228 170 49 9
2598 I agree it's a decidedly American metaphor, but jeezus Gary you are a Proctologist and I personally don't think it suits you. 1.2938 0.03911 211 161 38 12
2599 There, I turned my chair. Now put down the guitar. 1.2938 0.03673 211 157 46 8
2600 My advice - change the lyrics. 'I've never been to bed with an ugly woman, but I've sure woken up with a few' won't cut it with the MeToo crowd. 1.2938 0.04243 211 167 26 18
2601 Perhaps “Yippie yi ooh Yippie yi yay” was a bit of a trigger for you, no? 1.2936 0.03478 218 160 52 6
2602 `Don't Fence Me In'? -- You're paranoid. 1.2936 0.03713 218 164 44 10
2603 Dang me. Dang me. I ought to take a rope and hang me. 1.2936 0.03987 218 169 34 15
2604 When did it stop feeling like your home on the range? 1.2936 0.03713 218 164 44 10
2605 Once more, this time with feeling. 1.2936 0.04040 218 170 32 16
2606 I'm an old cowhand from Flushing, Queens" may, in fact, be of no deeper significance. But it's catchy 1.2935 0.04084 184 139 36 9
2607 Tell me again when Lucile left you with four hungry children and a crop in the field. 1.2933 0.03636 225 169 46 10
2608 So, you travel alone, but are you really lonesome? 1.2933 0.03581 225 168 48 9
2609 We've covered your dog, girlfriend and your old car. Let's move on. 1.2933 0.03744 225 171 42 12
2610 These deer, and the antelope. Tell me how they play. 1.2933 0.03767 208 156 43 9
2611 Where do you identify on the continuum from country to western? 1.2933 0.04064 208 161 33 14
2612 Why do you think you need a home where the buffalo roam? 1.2933 0.03829 208 157 41 10
2613 I have been considering suicide... ever since you started playing. 1.2933 0.04064 208 161 33 14
2614 I hate to tell you, but, it's your misfortune and none of my own. 1.2933 0.04121 208 162 31 15
2615 Can you sing "Crazy" by Patsy Cline? 1.2932 0.04441 191 151 24 16
2616 Can we extend these sessions to 90 minutes? I was born a ramblin' man. 1.2931 0.03817 232 179 38 15
2617 Much like you, Freud could pick, but not grin. 1.2931 0.03616 232 175 46 11
2618 So you lost your wife,your house your car...your depressed , but I think you’ve got a great country song! 1.2931 0.04007 232 183 30 19
2619 I never sang for my father. 1.2931 0.03667 232 176 44 12
2620 No one knows the meaning of "Yippie Yi O Kayee" 1.2930 0.03916 215 165 37 13
2621 Let's start with your feelings for that little dogie. 1.2930 0.03627 215 160 47 8
2622 Do you think it's time Warbling Dave could just be... Dave? 1.2930 0.03567 215 159 49 7
2623 Play "Bad Shrink Blues" one more time and the guitar is out the window. 1.2930 0.03803 215 163 41 11
2624 I’m prescribing more ‘Home, home on the range” and less ‘Achy breaks heart’. 1.2929 0.03890 198 149 40 9
2625 How young were you when your pa first made you yodel? 1.2929 0.03595 239 181 46 12
2626 I really enjoy western music, but it's costing you $175. an hour." 1.2929 0.03643 239 182 44 13
2627 I don’t often say this, but you may need to consider switching genres. 1.2928 0.03667 222 167 45 10
2628 I like where this is going. But let's say you have something discouraging on your mind - what then? 1.2928 0.03554 222 165 49 8
2629 And when did you first start feeling like an old cowhand from the Rio Grande? 1.2928 0.03776 222 169 41 12
2630 So you regret telling your little dogies to git along. 1.2928 0.03722 222 168 43 11
2631 Your life sounds a lot like most country music songs. 1.2928 0.03722 222 168 43 11
2632 Well it’s time to “git along little doggie.” 1.2928 0.03830 222 170 39 13
2633 So how does it make you feel that your little doggie didn't git along? 1.2928 0.03722 222 168 43 11
2634 My method is, I try to get inside your mindset and see the world from your perspective. Um, pardner. 1.2927 0.03674 205 152 46 7
2635 So why do you think you would be so much happier deep in the heart of Texas? 1.2926 0.03646 229 173 45 11
2636 OK. Let's talk about why you want to be buried not on the lone prairie. 1.2926 0.03749 229 175 41 13
2637 The desire for a crossover hit is natural. 1.2926 0.03429 229 169 53 7
2638 So your wife just left you and your dog died. How would you describe your relationship with your mother? 1.2926 0.03749 229 175 41 13
2639 Well then try playing right handed. 1.2926 0.04023 188 142 37 9
2640 Tell me what happened after the I'm Okay, You're Okay Corral. 1.2926 0.04093 188 143 35 10
2641 And how long have you two had "creative differences" ? 1.2925 0.03597 212 157 48 7
2642 So tell me happened after your dog died, your wife left you and your ran out of whiskey. 1.2925 0.03658 212 158 46 8
2643 It seems like your life is one sad country song after another. 1.2925 0.03597 212 157 48 7
2644 Do you feel guilty that the dogies' misfortune is none of your own? 1.2925 0.03837 212 161 40 11
2645 No, I expect to be paid with cash or credit card. 1.2925 0.03597 212 157 48 7
2646 I’m sorry but I don’t think I can help with your so called hitch in your giddy up 1.2922 0.03918 219 169 36 14
2647 Just stop fretting so much and you'll be fine. 1.2922 0.04024 219 171 32 16
2648 So how did it feel to be the only kid on the range who wasn’t allowed to play with the deer and the antelopes? 1.2922 0.03698 219 165 44 10
2649 50 minutes. Why? Did you tie up your horse at a meter? 1.2922 0.03641 219 164 46 9
2650 Alright, tell me about your troubles, and we'll see if we can fix your heart, your achy breaky heart. 1.2922 0.04024 219 171 32 16
2651 Yes, it can be part of the therapeutic process if you tell me in song how your woman done you wrong. 1.2921 0.03639 202 149 47 6
2652 Tell me about those discouraging words back home on the range. 1.2921 0.03963 202 154 37 11
2653 We will continue exploring your frets at the same time next week. 1.2920 0.03676 226 171 44 11
2654 And before the range - you lived where? 1.2920 0.03622 226 170 46 10
2655 I’m prescribing a trip down to San Antone. 1.2919 0.03563 209 154 49 6
2656 So, you don't feel at home on the range? 1.2919 0.03932 209 160 37 12
2657 So what happened after your dog died and your momma got out of prison? 1.2919 0.03990 209 161 35 13
2658 We all lose our yodellehe eventually. Maybe you can yippee kio kia instead. 1.2919 0.03690 209 156 45 8
2659 And just when did your lone-o-oh-o-onesome hear-e-ar-e-art first begin to feel this way? 1.2918 0.03551 233 175 48 10
2660 Your woman left ya, your truck broke down, and your dog died? No wonder you're depressed. 1.2918 0.03704 233 178 42 13
2661 You do show a lot of pluck, Lefty." 1.2917 0.03825 192 143 42 7
2662 How long would you say you've felt 'lonesome' for 1.2917 0.03613 216 161 47 8
2663 When did you start to feel that home was really on the range? 1.2915 0.03708 223 169 43 11
2664 No, I don't hear a lonesome whistle blow. 1.2915 0.04002 199 152 36 11
2665 Notwithstanding your discouraging words the skies are sometimes cloudy all day. 1.2913 0.03735 230 176 41 13
2666 So tell me about these unusual thoughts of happiness. 1.2913 0.03735 230 176 41 13
2667 Okay, you don’t know that one? Well, how about “Don’t fence me in”? 1.2913 0.03723 206 154 44 8
2668 We'll need to go deeper on your relationship with Old Paint. 1.2913 0.04087 206 160 32 14
2669 How long have you felt achy breaky? 1.2913 0.03848 206 156 40 10
2670 By any chance do you know "Free Bird?" 1.2913 0.04144 206 161 30 15
2671 Do you feel like you had an equal pardner in the relationship? 1.2911 0.03561 237 179 47 11
2672 Okay....you've proved you've got rhyme....but, let's face it...there's no hint of reason. 1.2911 0.03459 237 177 51 9
2673 OK, now sing me one from your id. 1.2911 0.04047 213 166 32 15
2674 On a scale of 1 to 10, rate your ennui since, as you put it – “yo baby done up'n gone.” 1.2911 0.03763 213 161 42 10
2675 Have you considered that your horse may have wanted a different pardner? 1.2909 0.03684 220 166 44 10
2676 So, your gal left you, you've been drinking heavily and your dog died. How did that make you feel? 1.2909 0.03795 220 168 40 12
2677 I'm just gonna start a little campfire to help you relax. 1.2908 0.03565 251 192 45 14
2678 Now doesn't that feel better than your gun? 1.2908 0.03910 196 148 39 9
2679 What part of Yippee Hi Ho don't you feel? 1.2907 0.03715 227 173 42 12
2680 Tell me about your relationship with Clementine. 1.2907 0.03609 227 171 46 10
2681 I'm going to prescribe you some banjo diazepines. 1.2907 0.03969 227 178 32 17
2682 If you keep playing that same old tune, we'll never get anywhere! 1.2906 0.03884 203 154 39 10
2683 It really only matters that "you" think your tractor is sexy. 1.2906 0.04007 203 156 35 12
2684 No encore, please! Your time is up. 1.2906 0.03820 203 153 41 9
2685 Actually, Freud didn't say that about a "guitar" 1.2906 0.04127 203 158 31 14
2686 Would you say more about your relationship with Clementine? 1.2906 0.03324 234 172 56 6
2687 So you still feel more like a cow BOY than a cow MAN? Tell me more about your relationship with your mother. 1.2905 0.03675 210 157 45 8
2688 So what makes you say it takes a worried man to sing a worried song? 1.2905 0.03711 241 186 40 15
2689 What rhymes with despondent? 1.2903 0.04390 186 146 26 14
2690 I see our plan to quit fretting over it isn’t really working out. 1.2903 0.03407 248 186 52 10
2691 You say this started when she broke your 'achey-breaky' heart? 1.2903 0.03716 217 164 43 10
2692 Again, me do-si-doing while you play is not why we are here. 1.2903 0.03658 217 163 45 9
2693 And what was your mother wearing in this home on the 'range'? 1.2903 0.03599 217 162 47 8
2694 When did you first suspect that the "little dogies" were plotting revenge? 1.2903 0.03884 217 167 37 13
2695 Any requests, you say? Yes--pay the two months you're behind on your bill. 1.2903 0.03773 217 165 41 11
2696 If you don’t like my lyrics then find another psychiatrist. 1.2903 0.03773 217 165 41 11
2697 I reckon it's your ma. 1.2903 0.03716 217 164 43 10
2698 One where she leaves the dog would be progress. 1.2902 0.03747 224 171 41 12
2699 These happy feelings are wrecking your career? 1.2902 0.03693 224 170 43 11
2700 So you blame your mama for not letting her babies grow up to be cowboys? 1.2902 0.03853 224 173 37 14
2701 But does your truck love you back? 1.2902 0.03693 224 170 43 11
2702 Sometimes mommas let us grow up to be cowboys. 1.2902 0.03879 193 145 40 8
2703 Nice melody, I'm almost through writing the lyrics. 1.2902 0.04082 193 148 34 11
2704 Are you still feeling lonesome? 1.2900 0.03459 231 172 51 8
2705 ‘It’s hard being a cowboy in New York’ 1.2899 0.03770 207 156 42 9
2706 Perhaps we should begin with your home life. Where exactly do these deer and antelope play? 1.2899 0.03952 207 159 36 12
2707 Your dislocation anxiety is perfectly understandable, but what do you suppose the deer and the antelope really represent? 1.2899 0.03832 207 157 40 10
2708 You can't keep tuning me out, Stevie. 1.2899 0.03707 207 155 44 8
2709 So you have no idea where you left your horse? 1.2897 0.03689 214 161 44 9
2710 Once again: you can't blame it all on Mama, trains, prison, or your pick-up truck. 1.2897 0.03748 214 162 42 10
2711 It’s not your mother’s fault that you grew up to be a cowboy. 1.2897 0.03920 214 165 36 13
2712 ' Yes, yes. 'We'll cut 'em off at the Past.' Happy now?" 1.2897 0.03748 214 162 42 10
2713 You'll feel better soon - don't fret. 1.2897 0.04030 214 167 32 15
2714 ..so...after you lost your girl....your dog...your job and your truck...what happened next? 1.2897 0.03975 214 166 34 14
2715 ..so since you still have your trailer, truck, rifle, wife, job and dog, you feel that you have nothing to contribute? 1.2897 0.03863 214 164 38 12
2716 Oh, I've got Freud's in high places.... 1.2897 0.04190 214 170 26 18
2717 Are you lonesome...cowboy? 1.2896 0.03780 221 169 40 12
2718 You're saying you heard a discouraging word, and your skies are now cloudy all day? Tell me about your childhood. 1.2896 0.03834 221 170 38 13
2719 Yes, I’m afraid that thoughts of participating in ‘deer and animal play’ IS considered somewhat unnatural. 1.2896 0.03780 221 169 40 12
2720 Do you think it started with your home on the range? 1.2895 0.03595 228 172 46 10
2721 Of course your depressed You lost your horse, your dog, your girl 1.2894 0.03525 235 177 48 10
2722 Let's have you try singing about someone else's troubles. 1.2894 0.03822 235 183 36 16
2723 I feel like... I fell into a Ring of Fire. 1.2894 0.03627 235 179 44 12
2724 How long have you been feeling the blues? 1.2893 0.04024 197 151 35 11
2725 I already have a sunrise appointment next Thursday, how about sunset? 1.2893 0.04150 197 153 31 13
2726 This office isn’t big enough for the two of us 1.2893 0.04024 197 151 35 11
2727 One good hard yodel should unclog things. 1.2893 0.03556 242 184 46 12
2728 Friends in low places don't tend to be emotionally available. 1.2892 0.04109 204 159 31 14
2729 You say you feel the weight of the world on your shoulders, maybe the hat's to blame. 1.2892 0.03740 204 153 43 8
2730 When you first began to realize that your guitar might not return your affection, how did that make you feel? 1.2892 0.03740 204 153 43 8
2731 How does your girlfriend feel about you loving your truck? 1.2892 0.03867 204 155 39 10
2732 "Your repeated plucking of 'Don't Fence Me In' indicates a deeply rooted hostility either to your father or ---your horse." 1.2891 0.03782 211 160 41 10
2733 How long after your wife left did you lose your pickup? 1.2891 0.03899 211 162 37 12
2734 While writing a song about murdering your father and sleeping with your mother isn't necessarily wrong... 1.2891 0.03899 211 162 37 12
2735 You've cut straight to the heart with the refrain, where you rhyme 'divorce' with 'horse.' 1.2890 0.03585 218 163 47 8
2736 So you're an old cowhand from the Rio Grande...but were you breast fed? 1.2890 0.03701 218 165 43 10
2737 Anything else about life in the monastery make you anxious - other than the dress code? 1.2890 0.03868 218 168 37 13
2738 I've assessed your reflective personality disorder, and determined that this town ain't big enough for the both of us. 1.2890 0.03758 218 166 41 11
2739 I'm a Freudian You need a Librettist 1.2890 0.03701 218 165 43 10
2740 I feel we've progressed beyond E minor, let's try modulating to G major or another related key moment in your life. 1.2889 0.03679 225 171 43 11
2741 So tell me, when did this picking compulsion begin? 1.2889 0.03733 225 172 41 12
2742 So how does it make you fell when it gently weeps? 1.2888 0.03500 232 174 49 9
2743 I’ve been singing the blues lately, Doc 1.2888 0.03553 232 175 47 10
2744 Could you repeat the verse about how you felt after the bunkhouse incident with Slim and Shorty, but this time skip the yodeling parts. 1.2887 0.03434 239 179 51 9
2745 Go back to that third verse and let me hear it again 1.2887 0.03792 194 145 42 7
2746 So your dog died and your girlfriend left you ...how do you feel about that? 1.2886 0.03840 201 152 40 9
2747 I guess country blues could be a form of depression 1.2885 0.03692 208 156 44 8
2748 where the ego and id roam... 1.2885 0.03876 208 159 38 11
2749 ‘...and where do you usually see these deer and antelope playing?’ 1.2885 0.03754 208 157 42 9
2750 I think we've struck a lonesome chord partner. 1.2884 0.03674 215 162 44 9
2751 Mr. Brooks, summing it up I'd say you've got friends in low places, you believe beer chases your blues away and you still think you'll be okay." How can you possibly believe I'm helping you 1.2884 0.03959 215 167 34 14
2752 Even though you’re just stringing me along, you know, I still have to charge you for this. 1.2884 0.04014 215 168 32 15
2753 That's a first. My notes are in rhyming couplets. 1.2884 0.03959 215 167 34 14
2754 I sense you're feeling a bit fretful today. 1.2883 0.03599 222 167 46 9
2755 She thinks your tractor is sexy. How does that make you feel? 1.2883 0.03765 222 170 40 12
2756 So, let's go back to your upbringing - can you elaborate on "where seldom is heard a discouraging word?" 1.2883 0.03542 222 166 48 8
2757 Why did your ‘darling forsake you.’ 1.2883 0.03765 222 170 40 12
2758 So, how long have you had ramblin' on your mind? 1.2882 0.03361 229 169 54 6
2759 Tell me more about your pickup. 1.2882 0.03739 229 176 40 13
2760 And why do you feel there are always "strings attached"? 1.2881 0.03563 236 179 46 11
2761 Repeating “She’ll be coming round the mountain when she comes” does not give me much to help you with your separation anxiety. 1.2881 0.03663 236 181 42 13
2762 What are your earliest memories of your horse? 1.2881 0.03613 236 180 44 12
2763 We can pick this up next week for a few dollars more 1.2880 0.04038 191 146 35 10
2764 I think if you replaced “Down it with them whiskey blues” with “I’m a lonely alcoholic” you’d be making significant progress. 1.2879 0.04006 198 152 35 11
2765 I want you to realize that feelin' so lonely, feelin' so blue,does not in itself make you crazy 1.2879 0.03809 198 149 41 8
2766 Married 20 years, beautiful home in a gated community, never touched alcohol, faithful old cat, electric car runs great and you feel like a failure. 1.2878 0.04033 205 159 33 13
2767 I see you've kicked the blues. 1.2878 0.03913 205 157 37 11
2768 And why is it important to you that your horse likes your music? 1.2878 0.03913 205 157 37 11
2769 You said you are having delusions that everyone around you are hypocrites claiming to be hard-working patriotic Americans when in fact they are lazy entitled morons supporting a Russian-installed puppet. These are not delusions, you are sane sir. 1.2878 0.04033 205 159 33 13
2770 How long have you felt strung out? 1.2877 0.03940 212 164 35 13
2771 It's not the end of the world just because a horse leaves. 1.2877 0.03883 212 163 37 12
2772 You seem to have very healthy relationships. Except in Texas. 1.2877 0.03853 219 169 37 13
2773 Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen! 1.2877 0.03853 219 169 37 13
2774 So, how are you getting along without your little doggies? 1.2876 0.03718 226 173 41 12
2775 Eleven percent of people are ‘lefties’; so why does the nickname bother you so much? 1.2876 0.03771 226 174 39 13
2776 Sing me a song about your mother. 1.2876 0.03665 226 172 43 11
2777 But WHY do the deer and the antelope play? 1.2875 0.03715 240 186 39 15
2778 So, your having issues with your horse. 1.2874 0.03642 247 191 41 15
2779 Would you say that’s how your mother sang it? 1.2872 0.04079 188 144 34 10
2780 And how long have you felt so lonesome you could vry? 1.2871 0.04073 202 157 32 13
2781 Listen Doc, sometimes a guitar is just a guitar.” Jennifer Coon, Lincoln Massachusetts 1.2871 0.03823 202 153 40 9
2782 Sing me again the song about your mother. 1.2871 0.03800 209 159 40 10
2783 So, for how long have you felt lonesome on the prairie? 1.2871 0.03739 209 158 42 9
2784 I’m hearing you say you love him even though he wants to fence you in.” 1.2871 0.03677 209 157 44 8
2785 Ah yes, dissonance. 1.2871 0.03860 209 160 38 11
2786 I wouldn't quit your job with the New York Symphony just yet, Itzhak. 1.2870 0.03718 216 164 42 10
2787 In psychiatric circles, we prefer the term "low-down 'n' lonesome". 1.2870 0.03997 216 169 32 15
2788 You're playing it backwards,is your problem. And you still owe me for the whole hour. 1.2870 0.04104 216 171 28 17
2789 Okay, now let’s write the bridge. 1.2870 0.03750 223 171 40 12
2790 Your wife left you, the truck broke down, you got drunk...then what? 1.2870 0.03641 223 169 44 10
2791 you pay for these sessions but shouldn't I also be getting songwriting credits 1.2870 0.03750 223 171 40 12
2792 Yippee ki yay--you're a manic depressive. 1.2870 0.03775 230 178 38 14
2793 Very revealing, did your mother tell you to "Get Along" often? 1.2870 0.03621 230 175 44 11
2794 And this mountain-she'll-be-coming-round, you are...jealous? 1.2869 0.03578 244 187 44 13
2795 Yes, but how do you FEEL about all your exes living in Texas? 1.2869 0.03601 251 194 42 15
2796 I can join you on tambourine, if you like. 1.2865 0.04019 192 147 35 10
2797 Stop fretting. You’re becoming obsessed. 1.2865 0.03881 192 145 39 8
2798 ... and how did it make you feel when your wife left you, your dog died, and your pick-up truck broke down all on the same day? 1.2864 0.03859 199 151 39 9
2799 Let me guess... You ran over your dog again. 1.2864 0.03809 213 163 39 11
2800 My professional opinion, Seymour is you have no talent for Country. 1.2864 0.03924 213 165 35 13
2801 Sometimes a horse is only a horse. 1.2864 0.03809 213 163 39 11
2802 And how did you feel about those little doggies getting along? 1.2864 0.03809 213 163 39 11
2803 What is this yippee ki-yay that you've lost? 1.2864 0.03944 220 172 33 15
2804 Can we get beyond where you miss your horse? 1.2864 0.03728 220 168 41 11
2805 Maybe you could think over composing fewer songs about that dead horse of yours. 1.2864 0.03891 220 171 35 14
2806 Which horse to marry isn’t the issue here. 1.2863 0.03808 227 176 37 14
2807 Not everything you feel is worth a song, goddam it. 1.2863 0.03704 227 174 41 12
2808 So... You say you're tired AND lonesome? 1.2863 0.03421 234 175 51 8
2809 It’s not uncommon to deny your Mothers pleading, although there’s really no one to blame but yourself, because from what you’re telling me, Mama tried 1.2863 0.03629 234 179 43 12
2810 How long have you had the blues? 1.2857 0.03981 217 170 32 15
2811 OK, you're an old cowhand. Can we get to the next verse, please? 1.2857 0.03903 210 162 36 12
2812 So your wife left you, your dog died, and your truck won't start... 1.2857 0.03659 231 177 42 12
2813 On a minor note, we are about out of time. 1.2857 0.03487 238 180 48 10
2814 With your ongoing agoraphobia and debilitating fear of antlered animals,I suggest rethinking your home on the range. 1.2857 0.04574 175 139 22 14
2815 All dressed in white linen and cold as the clay...go on... 1.2857 0.03571 224 169 46 9
2816 Sometimes you can't let your guitar do the talking. 1.2857 0.03872 217 168 36 13
2817 And how did your -father- feel about you growing up to be a cowboy? 1.2857 0.03896 196 149 38 9
2818 You’re not going to be able to move forward until you own the fact that you’re home is no longer on the range. 1.2857 0.03846 189 142 40 7
2819 So, could we just revisit for a moment what really happened on the Streets of Laredo? 1.2857 0.03542 189 138 48 3
2820 Actually, it shouldn't cause you angst. There are many that have never had a home on the range. 1.2857 0.03555 231 175 46 10
2821 I'd suggest a C7b5 resolving to an F Major 7. 1.2857 0.03724 210 159 42 9
2822 Impressive, I've never heard 'Oedipus complex' rhymed with "pro-Texas annex' before. 1.2857 0.03761 217 166 40 11
2823 I wish I could quit you. 1.2857 0.03710 231 178 40 13
2824 Well, in your favor, you have a lot of pluck. 1.2857 0.03703 217 165 42 10
2825 You do realize you're right - handed, don't you? 1.2857 0.03933 203 156 36 11
2826 Let's get in touch with your inner youngin. 1.2857 0.03724 210 159 42 9
2827 Discouraging words more often are heard? 1.2857 0.03710 231 178 40 13
2828 And why do you think you buried him on the lone prairie? 1.2851 0.03715 235 182 39 14
2829 You say your mother laughed, when you traded in your guns? 1.2851 0.03514 235 178 47 10
2830 And if you were a Rhinestone Cowboy, what kind of Rhinestone would you be? 1.2851 0.03616 235 180 43 12
2831 So, you know a man, Bojangles, and he danced a lick; his dog up and died; it up and died. How did this make you feel? 1.2851 0.03584 228 173 45 10
2832 So... you lost your truck, your dog ran away, and your girl left you for your best friend... 1.2851 0.03690 228 175 41 12
2833 Your wife, and your dog, and your house, and your truck you say? 1.2851 0.03658 221 168 43 10
2834 You'll have to open up beyond "yippie yi yo kayah" if we're to make any progress. 1.2851 0.03768 221 170 39 12
2835 Was she driving the truck? 1.2851 0.03822 221 171 37 13
2836 So you're saying your Wife left you, your Dog died and you lost your job? 1.2851 0.03713 221 169 41 11
2837 So, you have a little story to tell and it goes somethin’ like this? 1.2851 0.03768 221 170 39 12
2838 I think your problems would be reduced if the town was big enough for the both of you. 1.2851 0.03768 221 170 39 12
2839 But what if your home isn’t on the range? 1.2851 0.03658 221 168 43 10
2840 How often does your guitar gently weep? 1.2850 0.03677 214 162 43 9
2841 You stole her G string for your guitar! 1.2850 0.03616 214 161 45 8
2842 I'm sensing unresolved issues with the lonesome whippoorwill. 1.2850 0.03555 214 160 47 7
2843 So, your wife refuses to let you have a horse? 1.2850 0.03630 207 155 45 7
2844 Well, brother, you're the one who chose to become a country and western singer instead of going to medical school and becoming a psychiatrist... 1.2850 0.03940 207 160 35 12
2845 I don’t know Tom, you sound a little flat to me. 1.2850 0.03709 200 150 43 7
2846 It may be cryin' time again, but I'm not gonna leave you before your 50 minutes is up. 1.2845 0.03324 232 172 54 6
2847 So your mama said her babies would not grow up to be cowboys...how did that make you feel? 1.2845 0.03542 232 176 46 10
2848 Sounds more like three chords and self delusion to me, pardner 1.2844 0.03668 225 172 42 11
2849 You realize, of course, that that is only a half-gallon hat. 1.2844 0.03631 218 165 44 9
2850 I can name that problem in three notes. 1.2844 0.03689 218 166 42 10
2851 The last part goes, "And the horse you rode in on." 1.2844 0.03887 211 163 36 12
2852 If you continue to play that-I’m going to need therapy. 1.2844 0.03887 211 163 36 12
2853 I paid...so you'll listen for an hour 1.2844 0.03944 211 164 34 13
2854 Why? It's tradition, Dave. The chair-guy sets the fee. The couch-guy pays. That's why. 1.2843 0.03977 204 158 34 12
2855 And once you realized you'd been hornswoggled, how did that make you feel? 1.2843 0.03916 204 157 36 11
2856 It's the "country" that makes you crazy, not the "western" 1.2843 0.03854 204 156 38 10
2857 What does, 'Mama, don't let boys grow up to be cowboys',mean to you? 1.2843 0.03661 204 153 44 7
2858 Have you considered just looking them in the eye and saying, "Hey! Paul McCartney plays it backwards too!" 1.2843 0.03791 204 155 40 9
2859 It sounds more painful with a drawl. 1.2843 0.03977 204 158 34 12
2860 You have to face facts: your cow is physically incapable of loving you in the way that your describing. 1.2843 0.04097 204 160 30 14
2861 Can you sing me a bit more about how your cheating girlfriend got hit by a train while you were in prison? 1.2843 0.04074 197 153 32 12
2862 Sing a little more about that. 1.2842 0.04072 183 140 34 9
2863 So as you were saying... your woman done left you, then your dog done died? Is this why you came to see me? 1.2842 0.04217 183 142 30 11
2864 I’ll take the melody on this one. 1.2838 0.03676 229 176 41 12
2865 There's some question if "Lay baby lay" would work given the Me Too moment. 1.2838 0.03587 222 168 45 9
2866 Could you be content with just seeing the deer play? 1.2838 0.03530 222 167 47 8
2867 I'm not dismissing your troubles, but when you sing them it all just sounds so boring and dumb. 1.2838 0.03861 222 173 35 14
2868 I can relate. 1.2838 0.03699 222 170 41 11
2869 Last time we left off just as you were beginning to open up about your 'little doggies'. 1.2838 0.03807 222 172 37 13
2870 How long have you had this urge to ride off into the sunset, Buck? 1.2838 0.03471 222 166 49 7
2871 Have you ever played more than three chords? 1.2838 0.03471 222 166 49 7
2872 ‘“Have you tried the harmonica?” 1.2838 0.03861 222 173 35 14
2873 So after the hip-hop thing failed, what did you try? 1.2837 0.03416 215 159 51 5
2874 Have you ever thought that your pickup, your dog and your beer might all be your mother? 1.2837 0.03662 215 163 43 9
2875 Do you know, "They're coming to take me away" ? 1.2837 0.03779 215 165 39 11
2876 And you wrote THE STAR SPANGLED BANNER too? 1.2837 0.03892 215 167 35 13
2877 Sometimes a horse is just a horse. 1.2837 0.03836 215 166 37 12
2878 You don't find it strange all your songs are about your mother? 1.2837 0.04002 215 169 31 15
2879 So you think you are a thousand lite beers from home? I think I see the problem. Where do you live? 1.2837 0.03662 215 163 43 9
2880 And what are the 'little doggies' in your life that need to 'git along'? 1.2836 0.03556 201 149 47 5
2881 And when she calls you a cowboy, does that make you feel less of a cowman? 1.2836 0.03890 201 154 37 10
2882 try it without the hat 1.2836 0.03625 201 150 45 6
2883 Can you describe these "blues"? 1.2836 0.03693 201 151 43 7
2884 So ..... I am getting a sense that this home on the range you sing about might have had more discouraging words than you care to admit. 1.2835 0.03777 194 146 41 7
2885 I just wanted to say again, honey, that I really appreciate you going the extra mile for our roleplay. 1.2835 0.04305 194 154 25 15
2886 Yeah, and your dog stole your pickup. Can we get serious for a minute? 1.2835 0.03847 194 147 39 8
2887 Your guitar feels the problem is you! 1.2835 0.03847 194 147 39 8
2888 I see that you've had the banjo removed from your knee .. 1.2835 0.04115 194 151 31 12
2889 Have you tried singing about something other than tractors, girls, pickup trucks, and beer? 1.2835 0.03983 194 149 35 10
2890 Are you upset about who the New Yorker selects as finalists for their caption contest? 1.2834 0.03677 247 193 38 16
2891 Now then...lets talk royalties" 1.2833 0.03561 240 184 44 12
2892 ...and then your dog died? 1.2833 0.03476 233 176 48 9
2893 You're out of your guitar pickin' mind! 1.2832 0.03654 226 173 42 11
2894 Tell me more about your home life. You said it was, "on the range"... 1.2831 0.03674 219 167 42 10
2895 I'd say the memory loss and reluctance to remove your hat can be tied to your recent scalping. 1.2831 0.03674 219 167 42 10
2896 I'm hearing a little Chicago blues style, Tex, which tells me you're drifting away from your roots. 1.2831 0.03731 219 168 40 11
2897 So tell me again about that achy breaky heart. 1.2830 0.03632 212 160 44 8
2898 Please take your boots off the couch. 1.2830 0.03813 212 163 38 11
2899 Actually, it's called 'the TALKING cure.' 1.2830 0.03753 212 162 40 10
2900 Sometimes a 'long little dawgie' is just a 'long little dawgie.' 1.2829 0.03838 205 157 38 10
2901 Now can you tell me in D minor? 1.2829 0.03775 205 156 40 9
2902 So let me get this straight. First your dog, then your girlfriend, followed by your pickup truck? 1.2829 0.03899 205 158 36 11
2903 So... you believe your lack of success is due to prejudice against left-handed musicians and not a lack of talent? 1.2829 0.03775 205 156 40 9
2904 I did recommend a lifestyle change. In this case however, talent would be helpful. 1.2829 0.03899 205 158 36 11
2905 So, it all started at your home, home on the range? 1.2828 0.03472 244 186 47 11
2906 What I'm hearing is that you feel at home on the range, but not in social situations with your MFA classmates? 1.2827 0.03954 191 146 36 9
2907 Tell me more about your mother and these "discouraging words." 1.2827 0.04158 191 149 30 12
2908 tears in your beer...that's a good start 1.2827 0.03954 191 146 36 9
2909 So what upset you so about your trip to Laredo? 1.2826 0.03610 230 176 43 11
2910 Start over again, this time from the chorus. 1.2826 0.03827 184 138 40 6
2911 Do you think you can sing the one about the happy, little kitty again before my patients arrive? 1.2826 0.03557 230 175 45 10
2912 Your mama told you not to grow up and be a cowboy. 1.2826 0.04125 184 142 32 10
2913 My wife came back with my pickup. Now what? 1.2825 0.03845 223 174 35 14
2914 Tell me more about these discouraging words and cloudless skies... 1.2825 0.03516 223 168 47 8
2915 You say this is the eighth song you've written about your mother? 1.2825 0.03684 223 171 41 11
2916 Being in love with your guitar isn't as bad as it seems. But if you ever bring it flowers and take the strings off call me immediately. 1.2825 0.03629 223 170 43 10
2917 It seems to me that this situation requires a little bit of fiddling. 1.2824 0.03706 216 165 41 10
2918 So, when did you think you could actually play the guitar? 1.2824 0.03931 216 169 33 14
2919 Tell me 'bout yer relationship with yer ma. 1.2824 0.03706 216 165 41 10
2920 So, let's see ... you lost your girl, went to jail, smashed your truck, and love your whiskey , and you still can't get anywhere in country and western music? 1.2823 0.03847 209 161 37 11
2921 No, I just think you're playing it too fast. 1.2823 0.03787 209 160 39 10
2922 So you say you're feeling mighty lonesome? 1.2823 0.03600 209 157 45 7
2923 No need to sing your response to my questions, Tex, just a simple comment would be swell. 1.2822 0.03809 202 154 39 9
2924 You’re telling me that the only reason you grew up to be a cowboy was to spite your Mamma? 1.2822 0.03809 202 154 39 9
2925 Your wife says you can't communicate without that guitar. Tell me about that. 1.2822 0.03449 241 183 48 10
2926 Definitely. “La Cucaracha” is your father. 1.2821 0.04161 195 153 29 13
2927 And how do you feel about papa being a rolling stone? 1.2821 0.03898 195 149 37 9
2928 So how long have you known your dog has fleas? 1.2819 0.03848 227 178 34 15
2929 So, you say all you need is 6 more men to make you Magnificent. 1.2819 0.03475 227 171 48 8
2930 How long have you felt you want to live in a home where the buffalo roam? 1.2819 0.03693 227 175 40 12
2931 So you resent your 'mama' because she wouldn't let you be a doctor or lawyer or such. 1.2819 0.03475 227 171 48 8
2932 How about how long have you been feeling this urge to go where the buffalo roam? 1.2819 0.03693 227 175 40 12
2933 So let me get this straight, you are married to a supermodel, but everyone thinks you are in love with a Grammy winning artist who was also your co-star in a movie? 1.2819 0.03848 227 178 34 15
2934 So your wife had already left when your truck broke down 1.2818 0.03602 220 167 44 9
2935 And then what happened to your truck? 1.2818 0.03602 220 167 44 9
2936 Your issues are small potatoes compared with Merle Haggard's. 1.2818 0.03771 220 170 38 12
2937 I'm catching your drift but lyrics would help". 1.2818 0.03771 220 170 38 12
2938 But for you music is not the remedy; it's the problem. 1.2818 0.03826 220 171 36 13
2939 It's time to put your guitar down and "cowboy up." 1.2818 0.03771 220 170 38 12
2940 OK, how about we start today's session in a minor key. 1.2818 0.03660 220 168 42 10
2941 So you believe someone should have told your Mama not to let you grow up to be you? 1.2818 0.03880 220 172 34 14
2942 Do you have an air guitar version? 1.2817 0.03350 252 191 51 10
2943 So.....when did you first become afraid of being buried on the lone prairie? 1.2817 0.03618 213 161 44 8
2944 And how does "yodelay, yodelay dee oh hoo" make you feel? 1.2817 0.03797 213 164 38 11
2945 So, tell me more about these 'little doggies'... 1.2817 0.03738 213 163 40 10
2946 Don't you know another song? 1.2817 0.03678 213 162 42 9
2947 Tell me how losing your girlfriend, your truck breaking down, and your dog running away makes you feel. 1.2817 0.03855 213 165 36 12
2948 Seldom was heard a discouraging word" didn't describe your mother 1.2816 0.04003 206 161 32 13
2949 And there you go again, bringing it back to Clementine. 1.2814 0.03710 199 150 42 7
2950 Your overall happiness and contentment is troubling. 1.2814 0.03778 199 151 40 8
2951 Have you tried playing the song backwards to see if your lady, your truck, and your dog come back? 1.2814 0.04038 199 155 32 12
2952 I’d say you have unresolved issues with your ma and pa 1.2814 0.03699 231 179 39 13
2953 Do you have any tunes about your mother? 1.2814 0.03648 231 178 41 12
2954 Sing the one about killing your father and sleeping with your mother. 1.2814 0.03699 231 179 39 13
2955 My horse never liked me. 1.2812 0.03778 224 174 37 13
2956 And do you think it would've made a difference in a major key? 1.2812 0.03503 224 169 47 8
2957 Tell me more about your feelings about your mamma not letting you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.2812 0.03615 224 171 43 10
2958 Tell me about your ma and pa. 1.2812 0.03451 256 197 46 13
2959 Can you play Stairway to Heaven? 1.2812 0.03933 224 177 31 16
2960 Mr. President, you may get away with the disguise but your love songs to Putin and Jong-un are a dead give away. 1.2811 0.04023 217 172 29 16
2961 You know happy music brings happy thoughts. 1.2810 0.03437 242 184 48 10
2962 I think it's safe to blame your mother for letting you grow up like this. 1.2810 0.03890 210 163 35 12
2963 Yippee-i-o ki yay is not a feeling, Mr. Cowhand. 1.2810 0.03831 210 162 37 11
2964 Notes:Notes: -Feelings of not belonging. -Attachment to land and property. -Auditory hallucinations. -Paranoia of being taken. -Obsession with rural roads. 1.2810 0.03710 210 160 41 9
2965 You’re suffering from a condition known as “musical strains.” If you don’t refrain for a while or it will only get verse. 1.2810 0.03890 210 163 35 12
2966 And you haven't sung Happy Trails in over a month, you say. 1.2809 0.04214 178 138 30 10
2967 Your kind of blues is rather common actually. 1.2809 0.03450 235 178 48 9
2968 Why do you feel that everything you do has strings attached to it? 1.2809 0.03450 235 178 48 9
2969 Ok, there may be something we can work with in "My horse fell on my wife fell on my dog." 1.2808 0.04161 203 161 27 15
2970 What if all the drinking, gambling, and wild women is simply a cry for street cred? 1.2808 0.03595 203 152 45 6
2971 I charge double for sing-alongs. 1.2808 0.04219 203 162 25 16
2972 But how does being an old cowhand from the Rio Grande really make you feel? 1.2807 0.03782 228 178 36 14
2973 Does your depression make you sing flat? 1.2807 0.03572 228 174 44 10
2974 Have you tried telling her how you feel without the guitar? 1.2807 0.03679 228 176 40 12
2975 I see we are revisiting your unconscious wish for attunement. 1.2807 0.03517 228 173 46 9
2976 When would you say that the dogies stopped gitting along? 1.2806 0.04142 196 154 29 13
2977 Can you tell me a little about this Yippie yi yo kayay?" 1.2805 0.04072 221 177 26 18
2978 Play me one about your mother. 1.2805 0.03701 221 170 40 11
2979 Play for me how that made you feel. 1.2805 0.03351 221 164 52 5
2980 May I remind you that it is called 'stream of consciousness', not 'strum of consciousness"? 1.2805 0.03588 221 168 44 9
2981 Are you going to take lessons? 1.2805 0.03811 221 172 36 13
2982 That doesn't sound like "seldom." 1.2804 0.03542 214 161 46 7
2983 Your woman left you, your dog was run over, and you totaled your pickup. How was it for you before all that? 1.2804 0.03839 214 166 36 12
2984 The real issue is not the guitar. 1.2804 0.03781 214 165 38 11
2985 Before we proceed can you play the one about your wife leaving you because you are an alcoholic with three girl friends? 1.2803 0.03412 239 181 49 9
2986 You seem flat but then I'm more a blues man. 1.2803 0.03563 239 184 43 12
2987 Well, DO you love your guitar more than you love her? 1.2802 0.03743 207 158 40 9
2988 So you sang “Beans ... beans ... the musical fruit”a little too close to the campfire? 1.2802 0.03986 207 162 32 13
2989 Did your father ever play a bigger guitar? 1.2802 0.03805 207 159 38 10
2990 She’s still always on my mind. 1.2802 0.03685 232 180 39 13
2991 Is there a way you can describe feeling "lonesome" without driving me out of the room? 1.2802 0.03530 232 177 45 10
2992 … have you tried an eight gallon hat? 1.2800 0.03656 225 173 41 11
2993 I like the part about 'Let 'em be doctors and lawyers and such'. 1.2800 0.03762 200 152 40 8
2994 Enough songs about your mother, already! 1.2800 0.03867 225 177 33 15
2995 No boots on the therapy couch cowboy. 1.2800 0.03656 225 173 41 11
2996 I'm afraid you're not going to find many little dogies around Boston. 1.2800 0.03546 225 171 45 9
2997 I mean, you have to ask yourself, Do I really believe that 'freedom's just another word for nothin' left to lose?' 1.2800 0.03957 200 155 34 11
2998 Let's start at the beginning, in the key of C. 1.2800 0.03763 225 175 37 13
2999 So what you are saying is your girlfriend left you and you ain't got nobody. I think I am seeing a pattern here. 1.2798 0.03789 218 169 37 12
3000 No, I don't know a word that rhymes with 'parental abuse'. 1.2798 0.03953 218 172 31 15
3001 We have to fence you in because you wandered over yonder and gazed at the moon till you lost your senses. 1.2798 0.03899 218 171 33 14
3002 Jeb you can stop there, I don’t accept country songs in exchange for therapy sessions. 1.2798 0.03706 193 145 42 6
3003 You have to WANT to sing the Blues .... 1.2798 0.04054 193 150 32 11
3004 Instead of yodeling at him about it, have you tried showing your little doggie how to git along? 1.2797 0.03641 236 183 40 13
3005 How do you think the little dogie feels? 1.2796 0.03756 211 162 39 10
3006 And how did that make you feel when your dog was run over by your wife and her boyfriend as they were driving your truck away? 1.2796 0.03932 211 165 33 13
3007 Have you ever considered you may be happier were you to become a doctor or lawyer and such? 1.2796 0.03989 211 166 31 14
3008 Have you ever heard anything discouraging ? 1.2796 0.03634 211 160 43 8
3009 Tell me about your mother, at your home on the range. 1.2794 0.03712 204 155 41 8
3010 This sounds like one for partners therapy. 1.2794 0.03903 204 158 35 11
3011 Tex - you're both out of touch and out of tune. 1.2794 0.03903 204 158 35 11
3012 Edible, Oedipal , who's to say? 1.2793 0.03742 222 172 38 12
3013 Harold, how about we pick your brain today? 1.2792 0.04123 197 155 29 13
3014 What about that word did you find "discouraging"? 1.2792 0.03796 197 150 39 8
3015 Your mother may have lived "over the saloon" because she liked the view. 1.2792 0.03727 197 149 41 7
3016 That's our time. Or do you prefer 'Whoopie ti yi yo, git along, little dogie'? 1.2791 0.03708 215 165 40 10
3017 So, tell me again, when did you stop feeling home on the range? 1.2791 0.03649 215 164 42 9
3018 Have you tried expressing your feelings without the guitar? 1.2791 0.03649 215 164 42 9
3019 So why do you think playing left handed has something to do with your mother? 1.2788 0.03728 208 159 40 9
3020 An old cowhand from the Rio Grande with depression caused by the Border Wall, is not covered by Insurance, sorry. 1.2788 0.03850 208 161 36 11
3021 No, an F chord doesn't mean you're a failure". 1.2788 0.03587 226 173 43 10
3022 Your picker is off. 1.2788 0.03587 226 173 43 10
3023 How long you've been on that Lonesome Road? 1.2788 0.03587 226 173 43 10
3024 Now could you sing that part again about what your mamma told you? 1.2786 0.03746 201 153 40 8
3025 So Doc, how long have you liked to switch clothes and role-play? 1.2786 0.04002 201 157 32 12
3026 Ok, so let me get this straight. You dream of a home where the buffalo do what? 1.2786 0.03876 201 155 36 10
3027 What do you expect with two strings missing? 1.2786 0.03811 201 154 38 9
3028 The dogies, yes. I see we’ve struck a chord. 1.2785 0.03829 219 171 35 13
3029 Hey Roy, I just heard a discouraging word! 1.2785 0.03545 219 166 45 8
3030 Why must you B-flat? 1.2785 0.03829 219 171 35 13
3031 You know, this might go faster if you'd just forget about the rhymes . . . 1.2785 0.03477 237 181 46 10
3032 How does the fact that, the answers are blowin' in the wind, make you feel 1.2783 0.03740 212 163 39 10
3033 'Yippee tai yai oh' my ass! 1.2783 0.03800 212 164 37 11
3034 So, picking up on your statement about looking for love in all the wrong places from our last meeting... 1.2783 0.03800 212 164 37 11
3035 Tell me more about your mother - but let's skip the Willie Nelson background music this time. 1.2783 0.03619 212 161 43 8
3036 But what if the range isn’t my “home”. 1.2783 0.03702 230 179 38 13
3037 And how did you feel when you lost all of your rhinestones? 1.2783 0.03753 230 180 36 14
3038 Let's get beyond you being drunk the day your mom got out of prison. 1.2782 0.03424 248 190 47 11
3039 So why are you so lonesome, Cowboy? 1.2782 0.03564 248 193 41 14
3040 If the prozac isn't working you can now legally smoke blue grass. 1.2780 0.03947 205 160 33 12
3041 Yes, but how does that song make you feel? 1.2780 0.03824 205 158 37 10
3042 How about, "Don't Fence me in?" 1.2780 0.03617 223 171 42 10
3043 I see, and how does that make you sing? 1.2780 0.03672 223 172 40 11
3044 And how did it feel playing second fiddle? 1.2780 0.03617 223 171 42 10
3045 I am hearing “Lone Ranger” as a metaphor for social alienation caused by the early childhood trauma of maternal abandonment, but I’m not sure yet about the Tonto part; can you sing more about that? 1.2780 0.03781 223 174 36 13
3046 I've been strumming my pain with my fingers. 1.2780 0.03781 223 174 36 13
3047 Here's my bill...the bank is down the road a piece. 1.2778 0.04028 216 172 28 16
3048 No, I'd LOVE to hear more about your truck. 1.2778 0.03808 216 168 36 12
3049 I think you misunderstood the concept of Couples Therapy. 1.2778 0.03864 216 169 34 13
3050 Let's go back to that first twang... 1.2778 0.04042 198 155 31 12
3051 I know that Johnny Cash took his guitar to prison, but what does that have to do with bringing your guitar to therapy? 1.2775 0.03628 227 175 41 11
3052 So, you're depressed because "The Yellow Rose of Schenectady" never became a hit. 1.2775 0.03628 227 175 41 11
3053 And how did you feel when he called you "snowflake"? 1.2775 0.03574 227 174 43 10
3054 Not bad for a lefty. But, I'm sure you hear that all the time. 1.2775 0.03712 209 160 40 9
3055 I can tell your dog really meant a lot to you... 1.2775 0.03521 209 157 46 6
3056 And when the little dogie replied 'If anyone should git along, it's you,' how did that make you feel? 1.2775 0.03834 209 162 36 11
3057 Cotton Eye Joe was probably just jealous." 1.2775 0.03648 191 143 43 5
3058 So when your mother suggested be a "doctor, lawyer and such" how did that make you feel? 1.2773 0.03515 238 183 44 11
3059 So, tell me how losing your pick-up truck and your best gal made you feel? 1.2773 0.03704 220 170 39 11
3060 If you'll just show a little pluck, I'm sure we can find the key to your problems. 1.2773 0.03647 220 169 41 10
3061 So you never actually told your pickup truck how you felt. 1.2773 0.03814 220 172 35 13
3062 You have to stop playing the same old tune if you want to make progress with this analysis 1.2773 0.03704 220 170 39 11
3063 I’m less interested in the deer and the antelope than I am in you, Mr.Hopalong. 1.2773 0.03704 220 170 39 11
3064 So how did you feel after what you saw in Laredo one day? 1.2773 0.03531 220 167 45 8
3065 You really struck a chord this session. Maybe for our next session you could wear pants. 1.2773 0.03647 220 169 41 10
3066 And when did you first notice this obsessive fear of being buried on the lone prairie? 1.2772 0.03859 202 156 36 10
3067 So after she told you she had flushed you down the toilet of her heart and that you were the reason your kids were ugly, how did that make you feel? 1.2772 0.03985 202 158 32 12
3068 So, it’s decided. You’ll work on the guestlist and I’ll take care of the food. Mom will be so surprised. 1.2772 0.04046 202 159 30 13
3069 Do you know"Crazy"by Patsy Kline and most of my patients? 1.2771 0.03637 231 179 40 12
3070 Okay, so your dog ran away in your pickup truck. 1.2771 0.03739 231 181 36 14
3071 This isn't exactly what I meant when I suggested you find something that strikes the right chord. 1.2771 0.03532 231 177 44 10
3072 Tell me more about where the deer and the antelopes play. 1.2770 0.03604 213 162 43 8
3073 If you can sing "The Jung Gal Fromm New Jersey", I'll cut your fee in half. 1.2770 0.03842 213 166 35 12
3074 If I may: I'd like to request 'Free Bird.' 1.2770 0.03479 213 160 47 6
3075 Tell me more about the lonesome cowboy in you...this time in the key of C 1.2770 0.03899 213 167 33 13
3076 I hear you've never had a stable home life. 1.2770 0.03604 213 162 43 8
3077 Sometimes a guitar is just a guitar." "Yes, and sometimes a pen is just a pen. 1.2770 0.03899 213 167 33 13
3078 How long do the twangs last? 1.2770 0.03604 213 162 43 8
3079 And how does it make you feel when the little dogies won't 'git along'? 1.2769 0.04017 195 152 32 11
3080 Tell me more about this fear that all the good clichés have already been taken.... 1.2769 0.03673 195 147 42 6
3081 So you're having truck issues. 1.2769 0.03668 242 190 37 15
3082 So let me get this straight, your dog died, and your wife ran off with your best friend? 1.2768 0.03373 224 168 50 6
3083 Tell me about your Sierra Madre. 1.2768 0.03658 224 173 40 11
3084 And what does mama think about you being a cowboy? 1.2768 0.03432 224 169 48 7
3085 Do you sing "Git Along Little Dogies" because you miss your little dogies or is it the only song you know? 1.2767 0.03869 206 160 35 11
3086 Now let's go back again to the first verse. 1.2767 0.03745 206 158 39 9
3087 I'd like to dig a little deeper on "discouraging". 1.2766 0.04048 188 146 32 10
3088 How about you tell me about your father again, but this time in E minor? 1.2765 0.03560 217 165 44 8
3089 That couch ain’t big enough for the both of you. 1.2764 0.03532 246 191 42 13
3090 And tell exactly why your love is like a freight train? 1.2764 0.03896 199 154 35 10
3091 Try more yodeling. 1.2764 0.03896 199 154 35 10
3092 Zees utopian vision uv za deer und za antelope playink suggests zat zees home on za range vaz, in fact, quite deesfunctional 1.2764 0.03896 199 154 35 10
3093 Tell me about your time in El Paso. 1.2763 0.03614 228 176 41 11
3094 Perhaps it is time to let go of your long little doggie. 1.2763 0.03505 228 174 45 9
3095 I prefer a nice Vivaldi string quartet, but Willie Nelson will do. 1.2763 0.03560 228 175 43 10
3096 So, at this home on the range, what did the deer and the antelope usually play? 1.2762 0.03697 210 161 40 9
3097 Just how long have you wanted a home where the buffalo roam? Do you have any close buffalo friends? 1.2760 0.04124 192 151 29 12
3098 Do you have any songs which don't involve dead family dogs or drinking? 1.2760 0.03779 192 146 39 7
3099 So, we’re in agreement? The next tune won’t be about doggies, your woman or your actual dog? 1.2760 0.03744 221 172 37 12
3100 And how long has Mother been singing along from under your hat? 1.2760 0.04060 221 178 25 18
3101 Putting your boots on my couch tells me a great deal about you 1.2760 0.03518 221 168 45 8
3102 No wonder you're depressed. You lost your job, you lost your wife, you lost your truck, and now you've lost your dog. 1.2760 0.03744 221 172 37 12
3103 Let's discuss your obsessive desire to acquire a long little doggy... 1.2760 0.03539 250 195 41 14
3104 So in your dream you showed up with a 6 string and he had a 6 shooter. 1.2757 0.03512 243 188 43 12
3105 So your wife ran away and the dog died? What happened next? 1.2757 0.03883 214 168 33 13
3106 I'll have you all tuned up in no time! 1.2757 0.03528 214 162 45 7
3107 Do you have any conditions that rhyme with truck? 1.2757 0.03465 214 161 47 6
3108 So, in your dream, you're Paul Anka? 1.2757 0.03883 214 168 33 13
3109 Being evicted from your home on the range is quite possibly the reason you're so lonesome you could cry. 1.2757 0.03826 214 167 35 12
3110 Never heard of that before, but if you play a few bars... 1.2757 0.03868 185 141 37 7
3111 Sounds a little bit sharp. 1.2756 0.03477 225 171 46 8
3112 That doesn't sound like a minor problem. 1.2756 0.03533 225 172 44 9
3113 The synagogue members can no longer tolerate their cantor playing Willie Nelson songs 1.2755 0.04064 196 154 30 12
3114 Boots off the furniture, please. 1.2755 0.03866 196 151 36 9
3115 You say your horse died and he never did that before? 1.2754 0.03630 236 184 39 13
3116 And why do you think you want the little dogies to git along? 1.2754 0.03630 236 184 39 13
3117 You are always on my mind!! 1.2754 0.03666 207 158 41 8
3118 Let's talk about your song comparing your father to the steer that did not survive the cattle drive from Omaha to Abilene. 1.2752 0.03663 218 168 40 10
3119 What's been pulling your strings? 1.2752 0.03721 218 169 38 11
3120 Let's dig a little deeper into these "varmints." 1.2752 0.03546 218 166 44 8
3121 Once you discover your inner sunshine is your only sunshine, nothing can take it away. 1.2752 0.03721 218 169 38 11
3122 So now you’re an ol’ cow hand on a psychiatric plan 1.2751 0.03740 189 143 40 6
3123 If your mama hadn't let her baby grow up to be a cowboy, what career path do you think you would have chosen? 1.2751 0.03959 189 146 34 9
3124 Oh, I thought you were referring to your other G string. 1.2750 0.03813 200 154 37 9
3125 At least the skies are not cloudy all day 1.2750 0.03747 200 153 39 8
3126 I know. I KNOW. You got a feelin’ called the blues since your baby said goodbye.... 1.2749 0.03802 211 164 36 11
3127 Well, they do say one in three mariachis end in divorce. 1.2749 0.03919 211 166 32 13
3128 So you feel this resentment toward your mama for her letting you become a cowboy rather than a doctor or lawyer or such? 1.2749 0.03742 211 163 38 10
3129 I sense a great deal of discouragement in that one. 1.2749 0.03802 211 164 36 11
3130 Your insomnia may be related to your cheating heart, or it could be that extra cup of coffee you have in the afternoon. 1.2748 0.03386 222 167 49 6
3131 You've really had bad luck with dogs. 1.2748 0.03504 222 169 45 8
3132 Duke, playing the sad song backwards will not reverse your wife's running off with the mailman, your truck's falling apart, or your dog from getting run over. That's an urban myth. 1.2748 0.03562 222 170 43 9
3133 Please, not that same old refrain. 1.2748 0.03445 222 168 47 7
3134 Are you sure the lyrics should be “my mother took my pickup and I’m going to kill her” 1.2748 0.03618 222 171 41 10
3135 I'm so relieved you left your banjo home this session. 1.2747 0.03710 233 183 36 14
3136 Candidly, Tex, you do have a big hat, big boots and no cattle. 1.2747 0.03505 233 179 44 10
3137 Somewhere between Carl Perkins and Carl Jung is our first Grammy.” 1.2747 0.03609 233 181 40 12
3138 And do you really feel nothing for the misfortunate little dogies? 1.2747 0.03505 233 179 44 10
3139 Stay tuned for next week. 1.2746 0.03903 193 149 35 9
3140 And how did walking out on the streets of Laredo make you feel? 1.2746 0.03594 244 191 39 14
3141 How do the antelopes at play make you feel? 1.2746 0.03499 244 189 43 12
3142 You harbor an obsession for trains, dogs, and rain...classic Willie and Waylon syndrome. 1.2745 0.03763 204 157 38 9
3143 And how did it make you feel when she left with your dog? 1.2745 0.03763 204 157 38 9
3144 We have established you are an old cowhand from the Rio Grande. Now can we talk about your mother? 1.2744 0.03753 215 167 37 11
3145 That's your fourth song about urban cow pies. 1.2744 0.03753 215 167 37 11
3146 It doesn't have to be a Lonesome Road... 1.2744 0.03514 215 163 45 7
3147 You called and said that you were going through a blues phase... 1.2744 0.03867 215 169 33 13
3148 So, you say, you have lost your wife, your kids, your house, your pickup truck.... 1.2743 0.03463 226 172 46 8
3149 Are those lyrics really true? 1.2743 0.03463 226 172 46 8
3150 I hear that she just flushed you from the bathroom of her heart. And how does that make you feel? 1.2743 0.03463 226 172 46 8
3151 Let’s explore your obsession with deer and antelope. 1.2743 0.03361 237 180 49 8
3152 If you don't get those boots of my new couch I will shove that guitar where your id doesn't shine!!! 1.2743 0.03715 237 187 35 15
3153 So you asked her to be the yee to your haw and she left you? 1.2743 0.03414 237 181 47 9
3154 I don't usually work on trade, but I do have some dogies that need punching. 1.2742 0.03925 186 143 35 8
3155 There's no judgement here - play the blues if it feels right. 1.2742 0.03413 248 191 46 11
3156 Would you rather sing about it? 1.2741 0.03849 197 152 36 9
3157 Lots of people liked Brokeback Mountain - maybe you're reading to much into this 1.2741 0.03712 197 150 40 7
3158 So, the symptoms you have described: fret, not in tune with others, feeling tight as a wound string - have you considered you may have an associative disorder? 1.2741 0.03712 197 150 40 7
3159 It's very common, a lot of people are feeling strung-out these days. 1.2740 0.03651 208 159 41 8
3160 Let's trade places, Tex, and I'll tell you how your song makes me feel. 1.2740 0.03897 208 163 33 12
3161 You are having a difficult adjustment. Here, seldom is heard an encouraging word. 1.2740 0.03714 208 160 39 9
3162 You have an exceptionally bad case of the blues 1.2740 0.03762 219 171 36 12
3163 You say you're missin' your missee, but the melody suggests otherwise. 1.2740 0.03532 219 167 44 8
3164 I'd like to explore these "Little dogies" some more. Where exactly you'd like them to "get along" to? 1.2740 0.03649 219 169 40 10
3165 What is it about “Yippee ki yi yo, get along little dogie” that hurts your self esteem? 1.2740 0.03706 219 170 38 11
3166 Why don't you start by fixing your car. 1.2740 0.03591 219 168 42 9
3167 You know what Freud would've said about that last little diddy you plucked. 1.2740 0.03762 219 171 36 12
3168 I'm afraid the "cowpoke blues" isn't in the diagnostic manual, sir. 1.2736 0.03797 201 155 37 9
3169 Pluck the pain away. 1.2736 0.03862 201 156 35 10
3170 So why do you think he drove his Chevy to the levee? 1.2736 0.03605 212 162 42 8
3171 And that's when you realized your mare was seeing other studs? 1.2736 0.03605 212 162 42 8
3172 What do you think about waiting until the second verse before revealing that you have a crush on your horse? 1.2736 0.03666 212 163 40 9
3173 And how did they respond when you told them you'll be transitioning to Indian? 1.2736 0.03845 212 166 34 12
3174 And how does that done make ya feel? 1.2736 0.03786 212 165 36 11
3175 When did you first notice an uncontrollable urge to repeat the refrain? 1.2736 0.03542 212 161 44 7
3176 Let's dig into why you're so picky. 1.2735 0.03822 223 176 33 14
3177 I can see I've really struck a chord with you. 1.2735 0.03769 223 175 35 13
3178 Maybe its time to start thinking about YOUR Happy trail... 1.2732 0.03885 194 150 35 9
3179 Can you tell me more about your feeling unaccompanied and fenced in? 1.2732 0.03617 205 156 42 7
3180 Your horse left you for a banjo player. How does that makes you feel? 1.2731 0.03500 216 164 45 7
3181 Let's talk some more about this, ah, 'long little dogie' you sing about so much" 1.2731 0.03680 216 167 39 10
3182 Well, have you considered friends in high places? 1.2731 0.03738 216 168 37 11
3183 So I guess you are not Ariana Grande anymore? 1.2731 0.03851 216 170 33 13
3184 I think learning to ride before you learned to stand is the root of your problems. 1.2731 0.03680 216 167 39 10
3185 Let's unpack this fixation on buffalo, deer and antelope. 1.2731 0.03621 216 166 41 9
3186 How long have you had this fear of pickup trucks and honky-tonks?" 1.2731 0.03561 227 175 42 10
3187 A lot of the best country songs are about heartbreak. Are you sure you want to work through these feelings? 1.2731 0.03506 227 174 44 9
3188 And after you wake up, do you still see the cows? 1.2731 0.03335 227 171 50 6
3189 I can name that tune in one session... 1.2731 0.03304 249 190 50 9
3190 Could you yodel some more about your mother? 1.2731 0.03524 260 205 39 16
3191 Let’s unpack that...‘achy breaky’ 1.2727 0.03625 231 180 39 12
3192 Not that it matters one way or another, but this rug is from Morocco 1.2727 0.04028 198 156 30 12
3193 She just wants you to start acting like a cowman. 1.2727 0.03520 231 178 43 10
3194 I see here that you've been seen in the past for the Lovesick Blues. 1.2727 0.03880 209 164 33 12
3195 Could your dogie be a substitute for someone else? 1.2727 0.03747 220 172 36 12
3196 Your "deer" and your "antelope" are clearly at odds, Mr. Cash. 1.2727 0.03747 220 172 36 12
3197 Let's hear the chorus again, without choking up this time. 1.2727 0.03898 198 154 34 10
3198 So, after your dog died and your wife left you, what's the next verse? 1.2727 0.03963 198 155 32 11
3199 Tell me more about how these cowmen and farmers can't be friends. 1.2727 0.03415 242 186 46 10
3200 I've seldom heard such discouraging words! Have you thought of just going home to the range? 1.2727 0.03260 242 183 52 7
3201 I assure you, sir, the key is immaterial. 1.2727 0.03691 220 171 38 11
3202 If you are lonely, perhaps you should get a long little doggie? 1.2727 0.03821 209 163 35 11
3203 It's time to move past "Home On The Range" and consider "Stairway To Heaven" 1.2727 0.03677 231 181 37 13
3204 I know you've got the blues, Earl. You don't have to sing them EVERY time. 1.2723 0.03427 235 180 46 9
3205 What ever happened to ‘seldom is heard a discouraging word?’ 1.2723 0.03754 224 176 35 13
3206 Now that I’m hearing your music for the first time I’m forced to reevaluate my diagnosis. These feelings of self-loathing are completely justified. Frankly you’ve wasted both our time. 1.2723 0.03754 224 176 35 13
3207 Let’s pick this out again next week. 1.2723 0.03360 224 169 49 6
3208 By "cowboy up" I mean it's time you got the heck off my couch. 1.2723 0.03771 213 166 36 11
3209 So becoming a cowboy didn’t stop you getting the blues? 1.2723 0.03712 213 165 38 10
3210 You say that your mama let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.2723 0.03651 213 164 40 9
3211 Tex, it's now clear to me that your mood music is triggering your mood disorder. 1.2723 0.03771 213 166 36 11
3212 Very touching but I am still not eating beef. 1.2723 0.03771 213 166 36 11
3213 So, to clarify, it's your view that these dogies are going along just to get along? 1.2723 0.03590 213 163 42 8
3214 I'll tell you this, pardner: It takes a real cowman to wear pink. 1.2723 0.03712 213 165 38 10
3215 OK, so you say your girl left you and she took your dog and your truck. How does that make you feel? 1.2723 0.03908 202 158 33 11
3216 Okay! Enough about your dog and your horse! Let's get back to your mother!" 1.2723 0.03852 191 147 36 8
3217 So you never did find a home on the range.. 1.2719 0.03548 228 176 42 10
3218 Only an absolute idiot would use y’all as a singular pronoun 1.2719 0.03810 228 181 32 15
3219 Under your current working conditions,it is quite normal to serenade Livestock or members of the same sex. 1.2719 0.03707 228 179 36 13
3220 No, Winthrop, Mom didn't like me best, she just didn't understand your flair for dress-up. 1.2719 0.03437 228 174 46 8
3221 Speaking purely as a Jungian, that second verse needs a bit more work. 1.2719 0.03606 217 167 41 9
3222 Tell me about this Home on the Range” 1.2719 0.03424 217 164 47 6
3223 Yodeling indicates a psychosis beyond modern psychiatric treatment, partner. 1.2719 0.03836 217 171 33 13
3224 I know it was only three minutes and thirty seconds, but times up. 1.2718 0.03667 206 158 40 8
3225 You play, I'll write the lyrics. 1.2718 0.03856 206 161 34 11
3226 You backed over your dog, your truck broke down, then your wife left you, or was it the other way around? 1.2718 0.03977 206 163 30 13
3227 No, you don't grow hair on your palms from playing with it all day. 1.2718 0.04068 195 154 29 12
3228 Will you please stop singing "Home, Home on the Couch"? 1.2717 0.04093 184 144 30 10
3229 I told you that in our sessions there are no strings attached! 1.2716 0.03597 243 191 38 14
3230 Have you ever tried playing it in G instead of E? 1.2715 0.03787 221 174 34 13
3231 So you hate your mother because she ignored the advice in the song, "Mama, don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys." 1.2715 0.03676 221 172 38 11
3232 Yes, I do think that playing a country and western version of Bohemian Rhapsody on an acoustic guitar does show signs of grandiosity. 1.2715 0.03504 221 169 44 8
3233 You lost your pickup, your dog, your wife, and your Gulfstream airplane. How did that make you feel? 1.2714 0.03980 210 167 29 14
3234 Enough singing the blues; why did your horse leave you? 1.2714 0.03620 210 161 41 8
3235 Enough about your heart. Tell me about your achy-breaky anxiety disorder. 1.2714 0.03744 210 163 37 10
3236 Your mother let the buffalo roam in the home? 1.2714 0.03946 199 156 32 11
3237 And how does yippie-yi-yo-ki-yay make you feel? 1.2714 0.03748 199 153 38 8
3238 I can assure you that lonesomeness is not fatal. 1.2714 0.03881 199 155 34 10
3239 Don't string me along. Just change your tune. 1.2714 0.03881 199 155 34 10
3240 I don’t think your song, “A girl named Sue” will go over too well 1.2714 0.03680 199 152 40 7
3241 In your dream is "she" a person or a vehicle? 1.2712 0.04351 177 141 24 12
3242 I can see why she left you, Pete, but at least the song's a surefire hit. 1.2712 0.03307 236 179 50 7
3243 When exactly did you fall off the band wagon? 1.2712 0.03619 236 185 38 13
3244 But sometimes a guitar is more than a guitar. 1.2712 0.03414 236 181 46 9
3245 So your mother left on a train with your dog in the rain..... 1.2711 0.03686 225 176 37 12
3246 This is going to work better if you quit insisting that your music speaks for you... 1.2711 0.03686 225 176 37 12
3247 So you're an old cowhand from the Rio Grande. Can you tell me more about how that makes you feel? 1.2711 0.03631 225 175 39 11
3248 Let’s return to your feelings about being the only left-handed guitar player in the gang. 1.2711 0.03347 225 170 49 6
3249 Sounds like your B is sharp and your mood is flat. 1.2711 0.03686 225 176 37 12
3250 'Oh give me a home' again? Face it, Mr. Carlson, you have childhood issues. 1.2710 0.03514 214 163 44 7
3251 In my professional opinion, singing the blues is not helping with your depression. 1.2710 0.03755 214 167 36 11
3252 As we discussed last week, I'm so glad you were able to leave the guns at home. How I can support you with leaving the guitar as well? 1.2710 0.03696 214 166 38 10
3253 Can't we all just get along, little dogey? 1.2710 0.03514 214 163 44 7
3254 No, of course I didn't just write "More like Home on Deranged". 1.2710 0.03637 214 165 40 9
3255 Your mother complex started when she let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.2710 0.03813 214 168 34 12
3256 So, contrary to the lyrics, your Momma let you grow up to be a Cowboy? Interesting." 1.2709 0.03699 203 156 39 8
3257 At some point, Lefty, you will have to accept that Singing Cowboy may no longer be a viable profession. 1.2708 0.03763 192 147 38 7
3258 Less blues and more odes to joy would help. 1.2707 0.03641 229 179 38 12
3259 That sounds awful. 1.2707 0.03745 229 181 34 14
3260 Twanging beats Tweeting. 1.2706 0.03533 218 167 43 8
3261 When you said you seldom heard a discouraging word, was that home on the range or Oklahoma? 1.2706 0.03650 218 169 39 10
3262 Well, let's try reverse psychology and see if we can get your wife back, the dog will be okay and your truck will get fixed. 1.2705 0.03959 207 164 30 13
3263 So, YOU were drunk the day your mama got out of prison? 1.2705 0.03900 207 163 32 12
3264 Being a gentleman cowboy must be difficult in Manhattan. 1.2704 0.03918 196 153 33 10
3265 I'm no psychiatrist, but that sounds like some crazy shit to me 1.2704 0.04177 196 157 25 14
3266 Where exactly do your buffaloes roam? 1.2704 0.03649 233 183 37 13
3267 Tell me more about this... "cow poke"? 1.2704 0.03440 233 179 45 9
3268 Yes, I know you got the blues, so let's talk about your childhood. 1.2703 0.03662 222 173 38 11
3269 So, how have you been feeling since switching to a fretless guitar? 1.2703 0.03491 222 170 44 8
3270 It just too lonely on the range. 1.2701 0.03542 211 161 43 7
3271 If you expect me to sing along to that, forget it. 1.2701 0.03542 211 161 43 7
3272 So, let's talk about why you abandoned the Blues. 1.2701 0.03606 211 162 41 8
3273 I gave her a ring - she gave me a finger... 1.2701 0.03906 211 167 31 13
3274 Perhaps you're hiding your shortcomings with that guitar? 1.2701 0.03789 211 165 35 11
3275 So, then your dog up and died? 1.2701 0.03606 211 162 41 8
3276 No, the music lesions are not covered under Medicare part B minor... 1.2701 0.03789 211 165 35 11
3277 Tell me more about the messages you get from the ghost riders. 1.2701 0.03668 211 163 39 9
3278 You told me about your true love stealing your pick-up last week. 1.2700 0.03505 237 184 42 11
3279 In this case, I believe your truck represents the lack of affection you received from your mother as a child. 1.2700 0.03864 200 156 34 10
3280 Actually, Nigel, that was a fairly decent rendition of 'Crazy.' 1.2700 0.04054 200 159 28 13
3281 I take it the Strum und Drang has resurfaced. 1.2698 0.03681 215 167 38 10
3282 I’m just not sure I even like whiskey or horses. 1.2698 0.03910 215 171 30 14
3283 I’ve heard enough about Billy the adult. Tell me about your childhood. 1.2698 0.03854 215 170 32 13
3284 Sing me the one about your mother . . . 1.2698 0.03740 215 168 36 11
3285 I hear you saying that your Mother let her babies grow up this way. 1.2698 0.03681 215 167 38 10
3286 Nice hat. 1.2697 0.03707 241 192 33 16
3287 Does "ki-yi yippy yippy yay" really reflect your true feeling? 1.2696 0.03812 204 159 35 10
3288 I'm sorry, did you say "Yippie Ki Yay" or "Yippie ki Vay"? 1.2696 0.03549 204 155 43 6
3289 Might a long little doggie help with the lonesomeness? 1.2696 0.03875 204 160 33 11
3290 Dusty, this is Week 16! I think it's time we moved on from "Mama, don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys." 1.2696 0.03875 204 160 33 11
3291 Hmm yes... and what effect did losing your house, wife, and dog have on you? 1.2696 0.03683 204 157 39 8
3292 So how fine a time was it when Lucille left you? 1.2696 0.03748 204 158 37 9
3293 How about "..where the deer and the antelope all play," not "cantaloupe." 1.2696 0.03730 230 182 34 14
3294 No, no, I sing, "Just call my name, I'll be there in a hurry You don't have to worry," Then you come in at "'Cause baby there ain't no mountain high enough." 1.2696 0.03411 230 176 46 8
3295 Well Doc, I'm having trouble believing that the deer and the antelope are playing. 1.2695 0.03330 256 198 47 11
3296 You can’t blame your mother entirely for your inability to get along with your little doggie. 1.2694 0.03636 219 170 39 10
3297 So let’s review. You love your truck, you love your dog, you love your wife. 1.2694 0.03458 219 167 45 7
3298 Have you tried replacing the strings? 1.2694 0.03749 219 172 35 12
3299 What were your feelings with a banjo on your knee?" 1.2694 0.03749 219 172 35 12
3300 Yes, Mike, aspiring to be in a Geico commercial is a serious condition. 1.2692 0.03636 208 160 40 8
3301 Are you familiar with pianist envy? 1.2692 0.03635 234 184 37 13
3302 I’m sorry, but if you continue singing me your problems there will be a $50 per session surcharge. 1.2692 0.03823 208 163 34 11
3303 You say one of these "buffalo" looks like your mother? 1.2692 0.03762 208 162 36 10
3304 First we will begin with your wanting to be referred to as "Hoss" 1.2692 0.03636 208 160 40 8
3305 I strongly suggest you quit picking it before it gets infected 1.2692 0.03533 234 182 41 11
3306 Look, Ed, if you want to self-identify as the King of Prussia it's okay with me but you need a different outfit. 1.2689 0.03713 212 165 37 10
3307 Also, try keeping away from Sarsaparilla for a few weeks. 1.2689 0.03773 212 166 35 11
3308 So you say you have trouble opening up to your pardner? 1.2689 0.03464 212 161 45 6
3309 No! I said you could pick your brain. 1.2689 0.03399 212 160 47 5
3310 As much as I like it, I require cash payments 1.2689 0.03713 212 165 37 10
3311 Ok, your dog died and your wife left you . How do you feel about that? 1.2688 0.04125 186 147 28 11
3312 Zing me ze von about your desire to kill your poppa unt marry your momma. 1.2687 0.03549 227 176 41 10
3313 Use your inner campfire. 1.2687 0.03493 227 175 43 9
3314 Tell me more about all the girls you loved before. 1.2687 0.03579 201 153 42 6
3315 It's your misfortune and none of my own... 1.2687 0.03974 201 159 30 12
3316 Where should we start- the dog? the pickup? runaway wife? or why you cannot put the guitar down 1.2687 0.03648 201 154 40 7
3317 Was she humming while you were strumming 1.2687 0.03847 201 157 34 10
3318 So how long have you wanted to be a rhinestone cowboy? 1.2686 0.03352 242 186 47 9
3319 You see, you were seeking a home on the range because you wanted your father to love you 1.2685 0.03547 216 166 42 8
3320 You're still playin' your Willie a lot? 1.2685 0.03607 216 167 40 9
3321 Could the something that’s missing from your life be the rest of the mariachi band? 1.2685 0.03839 216 171 32 13
3322 Does your five gallon hat make you feel inferior? 1.2685 0.03725 216 169 36 11
3323 You first need to learn how to tune your guitar. 1.2685 0.03839 216 171 32 13
3324 So what do you want to let yourself grow up to be? 1.2684 0.03286 231 175 50 6
3325 You bring that thing with you once more and we're done. 1.2684 0.03665 231 182 36 13
3326 Well it sounds like you had a wonderful home on the range. 1.2683 0.03858 205 161 33 11
3327 And when did you start hating your trail boss? 1.2683 0.03602 205 157 41 7
3328 If they would have just called me a cowperson. 1.2683 0.03795 205 160 35 10
3329 Define twang for me 1.2683 0.03732 205 159 37 9
3330 Tell me more about your pickup truck. 1.2683 0.03795 205 160 35 10
3331 So tell me about zees dogies you are referring to? 1.2683 0.04040 205 164 27 14
3332 I believe you're projecting your misfortune onto those little doggies. 1.2682 0.03563 220 170 41 9
3333 And when did you start dreaming in rap? 1.2682 0.03789 220 174 33 13
3334 You've told me your side. Now I'd like to hear from your partner. 1.2682 0.03445 220 168 45 7
3335 If you'll quit early . . . I'll sign off on Sometimes a guitar is just a guitar . . . 1.2682 0.03789 220 174 33 13
3336 Help may come from God, but you’ll still have to pay my fees. 1.2681 0.03467 235 182 43 10
3337 It all started when I bought a house with a porch.. 1.2681 0.03571 235 184 39 12
3338 You can skip the chorus. 1.2681 0.03414 235 181 45 9
3339 You really won’t be free of your mother until you break out of iambic pentameter. 1.2680 0.03869 194 151 34 9
3340 Let's go over the love ballad to your horse again... 1.2680 0.03938 194 152 32 10
3341 Have you considered the harmonica.....or ranching?” 1.2680 0.04071 194 154 28 12
3342 And what else were these little dogies saying? 1.2679 0.03926 209 166 30 13
3343 So...what’s your opinion Doc? Last time you said if I can make it here I can make it anywhere. 1.2679 0.03684 209 162 38 9
3344 We know all about the 'lonesome trail.' Let's talk about your mother. 1.2679 0.03807 209 164 34 11
3345 Words matter. 1.2679 0.03346 224 170 48 6
3346 It may be better not to pick where you left off 1.2679 0.03521 224 173 42 9
3347 And yet you prefer the Whitney Houston cover over the Dolly Parton original." 1.2679 0.03521 224 173 42 9
3348 . . .and what can you tell by MY outfit? 1.2679 0.03577 224 174 40 10
3349 How do you feel about taking requests? 1.2679 0.03346 224 170 48 6
3350 ... so, Bob, I hear you saying you would like to have a house with some buffalo nearby. Can you talk about that? 1.2679 0.03633 224 175 38 11
3351 Trouble is, even if you do try riding into the sunset, there's like twelve freeways between here and Santa Monica. Where you gonna get a horse that can handle that? 1.2678 0.03628 239 189 36 14
3352 And she feels that you use the guitar to ignore her" 1.2676 0.03757 213 167 35 11
3353 How many exe’s would that be? 1.2676 0.03637 213 165 39 9
3354 Honestly I can't say whether your codependency issues would make for a good country song. 1.2676 0.03637 213 165 39 9
3355 I appreciate your talent, but if you would just speak in sentences, that would be great. Paragraphs would be fabulous. 1.2675 0.03535 228 177 41 10
3356 So, how long have you felt as if you were an old cow hand? 1.2675 0.03589 228 178 39 11
3357 How long have you had this 'lonesome cowboy' complex, Father Jim? 1.2675 0.03490 243 190 41 12
3358 I lost my wife, my dog, and my house. That’s just the first verse. Wait until you hear the chorus. 1.2675 0.03633 243 193 35 15
3359 And what does being on the road again mean to you? 1.2673 0.03494 202 153 44 5
3360 Hmm, I see. Your mama let you grow up to be a cowboy. 1.2673 0.03830 202 158 34 10
3361 Let’s move on from the melancholy and dive into some funk. 1.2673 0.03894 202 159 32 11
3362 So, tell me more about the deer and the antelope... 1.2673 0.03699 202 156 38 8
3363 What if rootinish and tootinish are enough? 1.2673 0.03894 202 159 32 11
3364 And how did it make you feel -- the lack of clouds in the sky? 1.2673 0.03933 217 174 28 15
3365 And why do you think you blame mamas for not letting their babies grow up to be cowboys? 1.2673 0.03709 217 170 36 11
3366 And when you hear this lonesome whip-poor-will, how does it make you feel? 1.2673 0.03593 217 168 40 9
3367 So, tell me about this home. 1.2673 0.03593 217 168 40 9
3368 Yes, I understand you're an old cowhand from the Rio Grande. Unfortunately, you also have 'mommy' issues. 1.2673 0.03410 217 165 46 6
3369 Let's see, where do my notes show that we left off last time? Ah right: 'My wife left me again, just my luck, and I ran over my dog with the pickup truck.' 1.2673 0.03933 217 174 28 15
3370 Twenty years of therapy and you're still on that damned first line! 1.2673 0.03593 217 168 40 9
3371 If you can make it there, you’ll make it anywhere 1.2673 0.03652 217 169 38 10
3372 And when did you discover you were afriad to "Go on the road again? 1.2672 0.03547 232 181 40 11
3373 There’s nothing in my psychology books about dealing with the loss of a pickup truck. 1.2672 0.03440 232 179 44 9
3374 Music is good theropy; but it still won’t bring back your Mama, your wife, your job, your dog, of your truck! 1.2670 0.03835 191 148 35 8
3375 How is it you sum up your entire life in just three songs? 1.2670 0.03841 206 162 33 11
3376 You say the cattle are judging you harshly. Can you tell me how that makes you feel? 1.2670 0.03716 206 160 37 9
3377 Your chord progressions indicate a longing for open spaces. 1.2670 0.03716 206 160 37 9
3378 A snake… in your boot? That gives us plenty to work with. 1.2670 0.03719 221 174 35 12
3379 We’ve all got problems, you attention-seeking hipster prick. 1.2670 0.03774 221 175 33 13
3380 Being left handed isn't a psychiatric condition, even for a cowboy. 1.2670 0.03431 221 169 45 7
3381 Aside from being home, home on the range, how was your childhood? 1.2670 0.03607 221 172 39 10
3382 When I suggested needed to consider changing your tune this isn't what I had in mind. 1.2670 0.03491 221 170 43 8
3383 How long has this been going on with you and Buttercup ? 1.2670 0.03491 221 170 43 8
3384 Wouldn't it be possible to abstain from beans - at least once a week - if flatulence is such an issue for her? 1.2669 0.03506 251 198 39 14
3385 The mother issues, I can help with. I'll refer you to a good veterinarian and mechanic for the rest. 1.2667 0.03791 210 165 34 11
3386 If you really want to win her back, you need to upgrade your repertoire. How about, "You Are My Sunshine?" 1.2667 0.03640 195 149 40 6
3387 That home is gone. Give it up. 1.2667 0.03791 210 165 34 11
3388 Bravo. And how does it make you feel that your mother let her babies grow up to be cowboys? 1.2667 0.03619 225 176 38 11
3389 Perhaps they would laugh less when you sing, “I am a Rhinestone Cowboy” if you got a trim! 1.2667 0.03450 225 173 44 8
3390 So you say your wife left you, you lost all your money, and your dog was run over by a pickup truck? 1.2667 0.03727 225 178 34 13
3391 And how did it feel after you shaved your legs? 1.2667 0.03619 225 176 38 11
3392 You don't a psychiatrist; you need music lessons! 1.2667 0.03730 210 164 36 10
3393 So how does your guitar feel about you taking up with a piano? 1.2667 0.03852 195 152 34 9
3394 To me, you sound more desperate than Desperado. 1.2667 0.03920 195 153 32 10
3395 A little more strum... and less drang makes a happy man. 1.2667 0.03791 210 165 34 11
3396 WHY CAN'T I SING ALONG 1.2664 0.03522 229 178 41 10
3397 So tell me...how long have you been “D-ranged”... 1.2664 0.03629 229 180 37 12
3398 Last week you mentioned your doggy died, how did that make you feel? 1.2664 0.03884 229 185 27 17
3399 Pick a little talk a little pick a little talk a little pick pick pick talk a lot pick a little more 1.2664 0.03623 214 166 39 9
3400 Who gives a fuck? 1.2664 0.04078 214 174 23 17
3401 Could you repeat the 2nd verse, I missed the part about your pa. 1.2664 0.03562 214 165 41 8
3402 And what do you think would happen if you DID follow your bliss and went more into a kind of K-Pop sound 1.2664 0.03623 214 166 39 9
3403 I assure you, Mr. Tex, your horse will eventually accept your switch to funk. 1.2664 0.03683 214 167 37 10
3404 How did your mother feel about the banjo on your knee? 1.2663 0.03594 199 152 41 6
3405 So when did your compulsion to play out of tune begin? 1.2663 0.03664 199 153 39 7
3406 I suppose in a Jungian sense you could say your mother taught you the blues. 1.2663 0.03774 184 141 37 6
3407 There's nothing wrong with crying if your lonesome. 1.2661 0.03486 248 195 40 13
3408 You have to play a different tune if you want to make progress. 1.2661 0.03146 233 175 54 4
3409 Dr. Katz suddenly realized the mustache competition was growing thicker by the day. 1.2661 0.03458 218 167 44 7
3410 I must say, Mr. Williams, I don't see many clients asking to become MORE depressed... 1.2661 0.03751 218 172 34 12
3411 was this before or after the string broke? 1.2661 0.03637 218 170 38 10
3412 So tell me, when were you last able to express yourself without breaking into a ballad? 1.2661 0.03396 218 166 46 6
3413 Now why do YOU think 'Mama' ley her boy grow up to be a cowboy? 1.2661 0.03519 218 168 42 8
3414 Time's up for today. Shall we schedule another jam session for next Tuesday? 1.2661 0.03862 218 174 30 14
3415 I always thought that one day I'd be a Rhinestone Cowboy... 1.2660 0.03408 203 153 46 4
3416 So, which is troubling you more...the "old" or the "cowhand" reference? 1.2660 0.03814 203 159 34 10
3417 Tell me more about your getting along with Little Dogie. 1.2660 0.03617 203 156 40 7
3418 I would recommend group therapy. Would the drummer agree to join? 1.2660 0.03749 203 158 36 9
3419 Your rendition of 'Dead Dog Blues' may indeed indicate clinical depression. Bums the hell out of me. 1.2660 0.03814 203 159 34 10
3420 And why do you think the discouraging words became less seldomly heard? 1.2660 0.03939 203 161 30 12
3421 And then your darling forsooked you. 1.2660 0.03877 203 160 32 11
3422 Why don't you come to your senses? 1.2660 0.03617 203 156 40 7
3423 So you don't want to be a hound dog; crying all the time? 1.2660 0.03872 188 146 34 8
3424 No, I never saw another cowboy in Vienna! 1.2659 0.03355 252 196 45 11
3425 Could you sing the one about your mother one more time? 1.2658 0.03649 222 174 37 11
3426 I would like for you to tell me more about this "Pancho." 1.2658 0.03593 222 173 39 10
3427 Sounds like you’re stuck between a rock and a roll place. 1.2658 0.03649 222 174 37 11
3428 Tell me again: where do the buffalo roam? 1.2658 0.03593 222 173 39 10
3429 Willie I know you are depressed but they are legalizing marijuana in lots of places. 1.2657 0.03946 207 165 29 13
3430 No, Freud played the piano. 1.2657 0.03763 207 162 35 10
3431 Can we go back to when you were poke, poke, pokin' along...? 1.2657 0.03700 207 161 37 9
3432 I've spent my entire adulthood in search of my umbilical chord. 1.2657 0.03946 207 165 29 13
3433 Go back to what you were playing about your mother. 1.2657 0.03636 207 160 39 8
3434 Your songs do suggest a fixation on your mama. 1.2656 0.03411 256 201 42 13
3435 I knew your mother and she wanted you to be a doctor. 1.2656 0.04094 192 153 27 12
3436 Yes it’s a hauntingly beautiful lament for a bygone era, but your account can only be settled by cheque or Visa 1.2656 0.03454 241 188 42 11
3437 This is a safe place to let those tear drops fall. 1.2656 0.03194 241 183 52 6
3438 Anger is a reasonable reaction to dropping your pick in the sound hole. 1.2655 0.03659 226 178 36 12
3439 You're pickin' but you're not grinnin' - its going to be a lengthy analysis. 1.2655 0.03494 226 175 42 9
3440 Do you ALWAYS have to say it in a song? 1.2655 0.03817 226 181 30 15
3441 Home On The Range is my life, except my wife is light on the "seldom" and heavy on the "discouraging". 1.2655 0.03659 226 178 36 12
3442 You have a severe case of Lonesome Cowboy Ballad Disorder. Mariachi therapy isn’t covered by your insurance, but I can prescribe an antidepressant that will make you want to play “She’ll be Comin’ ‘Round the Mountain” in no time. 1.2654 0.03834 211 167 32 12
3443 Well, what did your Mama want you to grow up to be? 1.2654 0.03715 211 165 36 10
3444 Yes, yes I understand you're just a lonesome cowboy riding the range with your horse named Sally, but did your mother love you or not? 1.2654 0.03834 211 167 32 12
3445 If I shot her when I wanted to, I'd be out by now. 1.2654 0.03715 211 165 36 10
3446 Ask yourself: Is yodeling really necessary? 1.2653 0.03902 196 154 32 10
3447 It’s ok to play right handed while Trump is in office. 1.2653 0.03465 245 192 41 12
3448 Your ballad tells me that it's not the dove that's lonesome, it's you. 1.2652 0.03508 230 179 41 10
3449 How long have you wrestled with your so-called "Big Hat No Cattle" complex? 1.2652 0.03508 230 179 41 10
3450 Ok, try it again with a little more feeling and then maybe we'll get somewhere. 1.2652 0.03226 230 174 51 5
3451 "Why do you feel home on the range? Was it the absence of discouraging words?" 1.2652 0.03398 230 177 45 8
3452 Before you start singing, let me guess: Your wife left you, you lost your job and your dog died... 1.2651 0.03841 215 171 31 13
3453 Hold on, that last line was super Oedipal. 1.2651 0.03547 215 166 41 8
3454 So you say that you feel like a lonesome cowboy? 1.2651 0.03784 215 170 33 12
3455 No, I don’t think you’re crazy for feeling so blue. 1.2650 0.03716 200 155 37 8
3456 I really wish you'd wear pants to our sessions. 1.2650 0.03716 200 155 37 8
3457 Look, I can help you with a lot of things, but not your need for a home where the buffalo roam. 1.2650 0.03913 200 158 31 11
3458 To save the relationship, you'll need to get more in tune with one another. 1.2650 0.03306 234 179 48 7
3459 Tell me why you hate country music so much. 1.2650 0.03468 234 182 42 10
3460 How do you feel about those Mariachi years? 1.2648 0.03622 219 171 38 10
3461 On that note, let's pick up this woeful verse next week 1.2647 0.03668 204 158 38 8
3462 Unfortunately the Grand Old Opry isn't one of Freud's stages. 1.2647 0.03630 238 189 35 14
3463 Sir, I'm sorry, but this is not a casting couch. 1.2646 0.03464 223 172 43 8
3464 What exactly do you mean: yippie yi yo kayah, yippie yi yo kayah? 1.2646 0.03345 223 170 47 6
3465 What state do all your ex’s live in? 1.2646 0.03690 223 176 35 12
3466 Now express your fear of abandonment in D minor. 1.2646 0.03345 223 170 47 6
3467 I'd be grateful if you didn't yodel the 'my mother never loved me' part. 1.2644 0.03809 208 164 33 11
3468 You know., therapy can be more than just material for country songs. 1.2644 0.03685 208 162 37 9
3469 You know, you really can't live on a range. 1.2644 0.03556 208 160 41 7
3470 I agree with your inner critic, you should not give up your day job and go into music. 1.2644 0.03685 208 162 37 9
3471 How long have you had this strum und drang? 1.2644 0.03685 208 162 37 9
3472 Let's revisit the ballad about your mother's lack of emotional nurturing. 1.2644 0.03621 208 161 39 8
3473 Sure, singing about breakup and loneliness every night can get you down--it's normal. 1.2643 0.03480 227 176 42 9
3474 Please, be sensible and don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys 1.2643 0.03480 227 176 42 9
3475 Your horse is divorcing you ? 1.2642 0.03940 193 152 31 10
3476 Recurring dreams about deer,antelope and buffaloes? 1.2642 0.03940 193 152 31 10
3477 Sing along if you’ve heard this neurosis before 1.2642 0.03449 212 162 44 6
3478 Do you know anything by Beethoven? 1.2642 0.03876 212 169 30 13
3479 We record our sessions because my fee is royalty based. 1.2641 0.03441 231 179 43 9
3480 Tell me more about this home on the range. 1.2641 0.03548 231 181 39 11
3481 So you were saying: you were 4 years old, and you remember there was an empty bottle on a table... a train leaving town... a sad song playing on the Wurlitzer... a woman going out the door with a man.... Did she look like your mother? 1.2641 0.03441 231 179 43 9
3482 Let’s dig more deeper, tell me more about Susanna 1.2641 0.03495 231 180 41 10
3483 Billy, you're just a Kid with A minor obsession. 1.2640 0.03818 197 154 34 9
3484 Maybe singing on your horse worked, but in the couch I am afraid it does not 1.2639 0.03711 216 170 35 11
3485 Really? "Still Crazy After All These Years"? 1.2639 0.03593 216 168 39 9
3486 For our next session, I’d like you to consider the following: ‘Cowboys, don’t grow up to blame your Mammas.’ 1.2639 0.03471 216 166 43 7
3487 And how did you feel after your ‘Lil Doggie Got Along” 1.2639 0.03409 216 165 45 6
3488 I'm not going to say this again, I prefer classical to country western 1.2638 0.03402 235 182 44 9
3489 What rhymes with Jung? 1.2637 0.04172 182 145 26 11
3490 So, you love your horse. How does that make you feel? 1.2637 0.03766 201 157 35 9
3491 You know I hate when you string me along. 1.2637 0.03960 201 160 29 12
3492 Let's see if I understand: When your son called another man "Daddy," did that free your mind and melt your cold, cold heart? And is that what made you a ramblin' man, or did you just not like that kind of livin'? 1.2636 0.03608 220 172 38 10
3493 You gotta quit noodlin' around and take it to the bridge, Pablo! 1.2636 0.03608 220 172 38 10
3494 And how does being an 'ol cowhand from the Rio Grande' make you feel? 1.2636 0.03665 220 173 36 11
3495 What we got so far...Down in the valley, the valley so low...not sure I like the 'Hang your head down' part 1.2636 0.03431 220 169 44 7
3496 And how did it make you feel when your Paw stole your dog and pickup truck? 1.2636 0.03776 220 175 32 13
3497 Do you think this “Clementine” is a manifestation of your mother? 1.2636 0.03721 220 174 34 12
3498 And why do you miss this place where there are so many deer and antelope? 1.2636 0.03721 220 174 34 12
3499 Do you know your depression is contagious? No, but if you'll hum a few bars.... 1.2636 0.03567 239 189 37 13
3500 Your father was right - you're no Hank Williams. 1.2634 0.03965 186 146 31 9
3501 And how long have felt this compulsion to poke cows? 1.2634 0.03843 205 162 32 11
3502 I look forward to your weekly appointments. I find your music quite therapeutic. 1.2634 0.03843 205 162 32 11
3503 I’d like to delve a little deeper into this “home” on the range 1.2634 0.03586 205 158 40 7
3504 Your mother wanted you to play like Horowitz?? 1.2634 0.03782 224 179 31 14
3505 So you're saying you seldom hear a discouraging word? And you feel the skies are not cloudy all day? 1.2634 0.03675 224 177 35 12
3506 How does your mother feel about the time you spend alone with your horse? 1.2634 0.03478 243 191 40 12
3507 Nope, my dog is still alive actually. 1.2632 0.03577 228 179 38 11
3508 Tell me more about your home, home on the range. 1.2632 0.03683 228 181 34 13
3509 OK, let's assume that I'm Poncho and you're Lefty... 1.2632 0.03731 209 164 35 10
3510 Tell me more about this home, where the bufallo roam. 1.2632 0.03793 209 165 33 11
3511 Lazy convoy, hazy Hanoi, heck, lots of things rhyme with crazy cowboy. 1.2629 0.03428 232 180 43 9
3512 And Vaya Con Dios to you, at last. 1.2629 0.03428 232 180 43 9
3513 Your horse still isn’t ready for couples sessions 1.2629 0.03917 213 171 28 14
3514 It's Happy Trails, not Happy Tails... Nothing sexual about it. 1.2629 0.03860 213 170 30 13
3515 Before you dragged Tulsa Jack behind your horse, did you try using your words? 1.2629 0.03743 213 168 34 11
3516 Let's dig a little deeper on the "lonesome" issue before we delve into the "pesky varmints" in our dreams. 1.2629 0.03639 194 149 39 6
3517 A gray hat is neither a good guy nor a bad guy. No wonder you're having an identity crises. 1.2627 0.03281 236 181 48 7
3518 O.K., I've had enough role-playing, Doc. May I have the sofa back? 1.2627 0.03638 217 170 37 10
3519 And which was more discouraging--your deer phase,or your antelope phase? 1.2627 0.03638 217 170 37 10
3520 How does this sound..."throw Mama from the train"? 1.2627 0.03753 217 172 33 12
3521 Why don’t you tell me about the buffalo again. 1.2627 0.03395 217 166 45 6
3522 I see, and how did those years of indiscriminate 'posse grabbing' make you feel? 1.2627 0.03332 217 165 47 5
3523 Try a brighter tempo...our time’s almost up. 1.2627 0.03519 217 168 41 8
3524 Ain't gonna blubber 'bout my problems to a goddamn shrink." OK. Not bad. Now what rhymes with "shrink" 1.2626 0.03998 198 158 28 12
3525 Did your Mother let you play with your shoes on the couch? 1.2626 0.03733 198 154 36 8
3526 What's the first thing you think of when I say "Whoopie Ti Yi Yo" 1.2624 0.03295 221 168 48 5
3527 Are you telling me the whole enchilada? 1.2624 0.03417 221 170 44 7
3528 So, that's how the West was sung. 1.2624 0.03942 202 161 29 12
3529 How did you decide to wear a guitar instead of underpants? 1.2624 0.03942 202 161 29 12
3530 Can you elaborate on highly strung'? 1.2624 0.03879 202 160 31 11
3531 Tell me more about this home where the buffalo no longer roam. 1.2624 0.03750 202 158 35 9
3532 No, I won't go so far as saying that your love of Bach immediately qualifies you as a schizophrenic, but..." 1.2622 0.03437 225 174 43 8
3533 My advice to you Jimmy John-Play it again, only backwards so you get your wife, your car, and your dog back. 1.2622 0.03550 225 176 39 10
3534 I've heard that story before 1.2621 0.03504 206 158 42 6
3535 Yes, but I think it’s time we moved on from your home on the range. 1.2621 0.03436 206 157 44 5
3536 Is that your life or a country western song? 1.2621 0.03701 206 161 36 9
3537 Lets begin with the dissonance in your life 1.2621 0.03701 206 161 36 9
3538 Are you "on the road again?" 1.2620 0.03398 229 177 44 8
3539 Serenade me about your mother. 1.2619 0.03591 210 163 39 8
3540 Maybe you'd like to hang around. The kid from "Deliverance" is my next appointment. 1.2619 0.03654 210 164 37 9
3541 Please stop playing the blues during the session. It's depressing. 1.2619 0.03654 210 164 37 9
3542 Maybe if country music didn't just have songs about trucks, your wife leaving you, or your dog dying, you would be in a better mood. 1.2619 0.03836 210 167 31 12
3543 Perhaps these fences you keep vocalizing are obstructing your search for companionship. 1.2618 0.03305 233 179 47 7
3544 Yes, You can die with your boots on. 1.2618 0.03521 233 183 39 11
3545 Yep, that's the way it works... I pick at your brain, and you don't pick at your guitar. 1.2618 0.03415 233 181 43 9
3546 Let's start with your song "Oedipal Complex Blues..." 1.2618 0.03960 191 151 30 10
3547 In the dream, has your ol' dog been honky tonkin' when he hears the lonesome whistle?" 1.2618 0.03960 191 151 30 10
3548 Take my words as encouraging, not discouraging. 1.2618 0.03671 191 147 38 6
3549 Enough about your home on the range, tell me about your mother. 1.2617 0.03608 214 167 38 9
3550 You're not unique, Max. Nobody makes it as a yodeling cowboy. 1.2617 0.03608 214 167 38 9
3551 Describe your ideal home 1.2617 0.03421 214 164 44 6
3552 Tell me about this range you speak of. 1.2617 0.03421 214 164 44 6
3553 Tell me about your playing with the deer and the antelope. 1.2617 0.03728 214 169 34 11
3554 It's just the same song over and over. 1.2617 0.03728 214 169 34 11
3555 So you saying you got a case of the Blues? 1.2617 0.03844 214 171 30 13
3556 ...because your father was never home, home on the range. 1.2617 0.03669 214 168 36 10
3557 Being nude in Tim’es Square is not really a viable life goal. 1.2617 0.03608 214 167 38 9
3558 Yes, my mother was left-handed. 1.2616 0.03429 237 185 42 10
3559 I told you not to mess with Texas. 1.2615 0.03766 195 152 35 8
3560 Yes, but why must the doggies always get along home? 1.2615 0.03444 218 168 43 7
3561 Why so lonesome cowpoke? 1.2614 0.03288 241 186 47 8
3562 I now realize it's me that needs therapy! 1.2613 0.04167 199 162 22 15
3563 OK, now tell me about your home on the range. 1.2613 0.03980 199 159 28 12
3564 Maybe you'd prefer to think of me as a cowpoke whisperer. 1.2613 0.03647 199 154 38 7
3565 While there's no judgment here, you are a little flat on the high notes. 1.2613 0.03404 222 171 44 7
3566 What makes you say that your guitar doesn't understand you anymore? 1.2613 0.03691 222 176 34 12
3567 Is every song you write about your mother? 1.2612 0.03355 245 191 44 10
3568 Time is up. You can finish singing it next week. 1.2611 0.03734 203 159 35 9
3569 Let’s just say you and Lady Gaga won’t be singing a duet anytime soon. 1.2611 0.03537 226 177 39 10
3570 How long have you needed three cords to tell the truth? 1.2611 0.03366 226 174 45 7
3571 And when you WERE fenced in? 1.2611 0.03592 226 178 37 11
3572 I still think that red sports car was the better option 1.2611 0.03700 226 180 33 13
3573 When I count to 3, you will awaken and remember nothing of signing over to me the rights to Pet Sounds. 1.2611 0.03537 226 177 39 10
3574 So, Guitar: Are you familiar with the concept of enabling? 1.2610 0.03368 249 195 43 11
3575 Let's get back to your mother's posse. 1.2609 0.03602 230 182 36 12
3576 Tell me about your first emotional support guitar. 1.2609 0.03489 207 159 42 6
3577 Tell me more about Old Smokey 1.2609 0.03621 207 161 38 8
3578 It’s not about the horse, last week week you were Superman. 1.2609 0.03685 207 162 36 9
3579 Let's start by discussing your flat affect. 1.2609 0.03441 230 179 42 9
3580 And how do you feel about 'she done gone? 1.2607 0.03560 234 185 37 12
3581 You sound like you're pretty strung out. 1.2607 0.03576 211 164 39 8
3582 So what happened after you told your father that the town wasn't big enough for the both of you? 1.2607 0.03576 211 164 39 8
3583 Yes, but I think we can agree that if "Come A Ty Yi Yippee Yippee Yay!" was the answer to all life's questions, you wouldn't be here. 1.2607 0.03937 211 170 27 14
3584 No, I don't think the only thing the Naked Cowboy wears is a G string. 1.2607 0.03576 211 164 39 8
3585 I’m afraid I can’t except a personalized balllad as a payment, no. 1.2607 0.03447 211 162 43 6
3586 So due to your hate of fences, you need lots of land under starry skies above. 1.2606 0.03704 188 145 37 6
3587 I wish you'd git along and talk about your mother! 1.2605 0.03771 215 171 32 12
3588 D# Minor, now I understand! 1.2605 0.03533 215 167 40 8
3589 Listen to me, John, you need to stop this. You're completely strung out. 1.2604 0.04010 192 153 28 11
3590 So you reject my "Oedipus Complex" theory, but you can't stop singing "Daddy Took Mama Away"? 1.2604 0.03801 192 150 34 8
3591 I can tell you've made amazing progress because your new songs suck. 1.2603 0.03723 219 174 33 12
3592 And how long would you say that you’ve been on this trail of tears? 1.2603 0.03723 219 174 33 12
3593 Let's talk about that word: 'pardner'. 1.2603 0.03608 219 172 37 10
3594 How about a Freudian love song. 1.2603 0.03723 219 174 33 12
3595 I don't care how heartrending your ballads are, get your filthy boots off my couch. 1.2603 0.03430 219 169 43 7
3596 I enjoyed the song but that two minutes cost you $16.50 1.2603 0.03550 219 171 39 9
3597 Why do you think people pay you left-handed compliments? 1.2603 0.03490 219 170 41 8
3598 You’re right. Not many words do rhyme with ‘Limbaugh’, but that doesn’t mean you stop writing! 1.2603 0.03430 219 169 43 7
3599 Wait a sec, "...all dressed in white linen," okay go on. 1.2601 0.03391 223 172 44 7
3600 How long have you been stuck on the chorus? 1.2601 0.03565 223 175 38 10
3601 You have to get over your Village People audition and move on. 1.2600 0.03833 200 158 32 10
3602 Have you considered that maybe it's SAFE for you to feel lonesome and blue? 1.2600 0.03561 200 154 40 6
3603 I know your dog got lost chasing the pick-up of the guy who stole your wife before your girlfriend left you, and your last glass of whiskey got smashed in a barroom brawl along with this cheap guitar, but how 'bout we move past all that? 1.2600 0.04025 200 161 26 13
3604 It's high noon, lonesome cowboy. 1.2600 0.03898 200 159 30 11
3605 In my professional opinion yours is a classic case of being afeared your hog-killin' days is over on account of you no longer bein' the biggest toad in the puddle and so you might just as well be buzzard bait. 1.2600 0.03700 200 156 36 8
3606 So you spied a young cowboy wrapped in white linen as cold as the clay. How did that make you feel? 1.2600 0.03631 200 155 38 7
3607 So your dog died, someone stole your pickup and your wife ran off with your best friend. You know, it might help if you wrote a song about it. 1.2599 0.03353 227 175 45 7
3608 Is it possible you're really asking, 'Yippy-ki-why?' 1.2599 0.03632 227 180 35 12
3609 It's been my experience that "Kum by ya" doesn't mean much on the range. 1.2599 0.03353 227 175 45 7
3610 You have the Glenn Campbell Syndrome, but play it again anyhow. 1.2596 0.03407 208 159 44 5
3611 First time I've heard the country version of O Sole Mio.....your arrangement? 1.2596 0.03915 208 167 28 13
3612 I realise it is two different songs, but have you considered that the timing of Lucille's leaving and what you refer to as your achy breaky heart might be related? 1.2596 0.03855 208 166 30 12
3613 Let"s begin on the day you went to bed as Napoleon and awakened the next morning as Boxcar Willie. 1.2596 0.03794 208 165 32 11
3614 Now let's focus on your post impeachment period... 1.2596 0.03547 235 186 37 12
3615 It's time to roundup six Benjamins. 1.2596 0.03597 235 187 35 13
3616 So tell me about your Pappy. 1.2594 0.03498 212 164 41 7
3617 Your neuroses derive from your mother letting her children grow up to be cowboys. 1.2594 0.03745 212 168 33 11
3618 You say it's getting tiresome working on the railroad... 1.2594 0.03623 212 166 37 9
3619 OK, but this is really the last time we're doing a duet." David Rotenberg, San Mateo, C 1.2594 0.03745 212 168 33 11
3620 Stop strumming 'Home on the Range'—you're driving me crazy. 1.2594 0.03685 212 167 35 10
3621 The first step is for you to acknowledge that "Freebird" is a pretty good song. 1.2593 0.03367 243 190 43 10
3622 Let's hold your latest "release" until next session -I can't run late for my 4 o'clock angry Rapper 1.2593 0.03836 189 148 33 8
3623 So, she took a Louisville slugger to both headlights, and slashed a hole in all four tires. How do you feel about this? 1.2593 0.03518 216 168 40 8
3624 Your mama should have listened to more Willie Nelson. 1.2593 0.03687 189 146 37 6
3625 You have succeeded in moving from electric to acoustic. Now let us see if you can regress to the mouth organ. 1.2593 0.03579 216 169 38 9
3626 So, Lefty, when did you start seeing those ghost riders in the sky? 1.2593 0.03755 216 172 32 12
3627 Tell me about your dog before he died. 1.2593 0.03394 216 166 44 6
3628 Some patients say I charge too much, but you're the first to sing "Your Cheatin' Heart." 1.2593 0.03579 216 169 38 9
3629 So Mr. Chief Justice, what makes you think the other Justices no longer respect you? 1.2593 0.03579 216 169 38 9
3630 Well, Mr. Dusty, if you don't like being a lonesome cowpoke, quit poking cows 1.2593 0.03579 216 169 38 9
3631 Maybe she got sick of "Home on the Range." 1.2593 0.03639 216 170 36 10
3632 So, you feel more like a “cowboy” than the “pirate “ you were dressed as last month? Good for you! 1.2591 0.03594 220 173 37 10
3633 Both of us have been gently weeping for months. 1.2591 0.03651 220 174 35 11
3634 No you’re not hallucinating... that IS a wall on your range 1.2591 0.03651 220 174 35 11
3635 So what I’m hearing is that you feel out of tune with life.” 1.2591 0.03708 220 175 33 12
3636 I'm starting to think this desperado may be the root of all your problems. 1.2591 0.03536 220 172 39 9
3637 How long has your building in Midtown had this restriction on cooking beans over an open campfire? 1.2591 0.03536 220 172 39 9
3638 If you truly want me to help you stop singing the blues, you'll put down that guitar. 1.2591 0.03651 220 174 35 11
3639 When did these illusions that you were playing a guitar start? 1.2589 0.03716 224 179 32 13
3640 Wrap up your suicide ballad - you're on the clock! 1.2589 0.03551 224 176 38 10
3641 Seldom are heard, my discouraging words... 1.2589 0.03770 224 180 30 14
3642 Is “home” really on the range? 1.2589 0.03551 224 176 38 10
3643 How long have you been angry over the way your Mama let you grow up? 1.2589 0.03869 197 156 31 10
3644 I don't think we are making progress here, as you are starting to repeat yourself 1.2589 0.03663 197 153 37 7
3645 Let's talk about your song called "I love my mom" 1.2588 0.03723 228 183 31 14
3646 To put in layman's terms, it appears you have a case of the blues. 1.2588 0.03454 228 178 41 9
3647 You’re nuts if you think that’s a hit 1.2587 0.03475 201 154 42 5
3648 Quit playing it's driving me crazy. 1.2587 0.03751 201 158 34 9
3649 Can you tell me how that makes you feel...without rhyming it? 1.2586 0.03359 232 180 44 8
3650 So your problems started once your little doggies got along...? 1.2585 0.03829 205 163 31 11
3651 Last week before we finished we were just starting to discuss how lonesome you are. Shall we visit that again? 1.2585 0.03363 205 156 45 4
3652 You may call it "normal" out in the country, but here in the city we refer to it as "Oedipal" 1.2585 0.03570 205 159 39 7
3653 I’m not here to transcribe your song lyrics. 1.2585 0.03377 236 184 43 9
3654 Tell me more about how you feel buffaloed at home. 1.2584 0.03717 209 165 34 10
3655 Get the fuck out of my office. 1.2583 0.03781 240 196 26 18
3656 When it comes to discouraging words, there's a saying: Don't let the seldom be the enemy of the sometimes. 1.2583 0.03287 240 186 46 8
3657 Instead of another song demanding free medical care for all, sing one about paying your therapy bill. 1.2582 0.03669 213 168 35 10
3658 Just for accuracy, how many men did you kill in Mobile? 1.2582 0.03669 213 168 35 10
3659 Neurosis set to music can become a smash hit 1.2581 0.04020 186 148 28 10
3660 And how did it make you feel when your mother sold your horse? 1.2581 0.03443 217 168 42 7
3661 You seldom heard a discouraging word, but what about 'I love you'?" 1.2579 0.03403 221 171 43 7
3662 Play me a song about your mother 1.2579 0.03802 221 178 29 14
3663 I'm prescribing another big shot of that whiskey for each of us…" 1.2579 0.03748 221 177 31 13
3664 I want to help, but I think you're still stringing me along. 1.2579 0.03403 221 171 43 7
3665 Try going back to when you got a guitar for your wife. 1.2579 0.03522 221 173 39 9
3666 So we have lyin’, cheatin’ and whiskey and by the way your boots are on the couch. 1.2579 0.03819 190 149 33 8
3667 If you keep playing, we're going to have to change places. 1.2579 0.04100 190 153 25 12
3668 I know Dolly Parton, you're no Dolly Parton. 1.2578 0.03647 225 179 34 12
3669 Tell me more about how there never was heard a discouraging word. 1.2578 0.03480 225 176 40 9
3670 My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him” 1.2577 0.03973 194 155 28 11
3671 Mr. Clapton, I have some bad news for you. 1.2577 0.03695 194 151 36 7
3672 So, after that raging bull of love romped and stomped upon your heart, how did you feel? 1.2577 0.03837 194 153 32 9
3673 Did you really need to consume the baked beans just before our session? 1.2576 0.03384 229 178 43 8
3674 A dogie is always a motherless calf, but sometimes a stogie's just a cigar. 1.2576 0.03384 229 178 43 8
3675 I see. So,your girlfriend left you and took your dog,your trailer burned down and you wrecked your truck. How did that make you feel? 1.2576 0.03604 229 182 35 12
3676 Show me on this guitar which verse hurt you 1.2576 0.03550 229 181 37 11
3677 Now,for my information,could could you please explain Yippy Ki Yi Yi Yay! 1.2576 0.03784 198 156 33 9
3678 Can you describe for me the images that arise when you recall this “first rodeo” 1.2576 0.03646 198 154 37 7
3679 It's time to face reality -- the little doggies are long gone. 1.2575 0.03402 233 182 42 9
3680 I can see you being bored as a judge, but how did that lead you to become a singing cowboy? 1.2574 0.03800 202 160 32 10
3681 Okay, so I'm not supposed to say anything, but can we please move on, I know you've lost your job, you've lost you wife, you've lost your home... 1.2574 0.03600 202 157 38 7
3682 Would you say that you have been out riding fences for too damn long? 1.2574 0.03388 202 154 44 4
3683 A little less strumming and a little more talking is needed now. 1.2574 0.03734 202 159 34 9
3684 So........you've been out riding fences for how long now? 1.2574 0.03927 202 162 28 12
3685 Are you sure it's the guitar? 1.2574 0.03864 202 161 30 11
3686 I hate to be discouraging, but... 1.2573 0.03686 206 162 35 9
3687 Perhaps the lasso was actually binding you as well? 1.2573 0.03419 206 158 43 5
3688 Tell me more about your fantasies concerning your G-string and your horse. 1.2573 0.03686 206 162 35 9
3689 How did it make you feel when you punched that doggie? 1.2573 0.03686 206 162 35 9
3690 Then let's see how you like my next one, `The Lonesome Therapist.'' It goes a little like this... 1.2573 0.03686 206 162 35 9
3691 Can you unpack what you mean by 'Where never is heard a discouraging word?' 1.2573 0.03749 206 163 33 10
3692 So you defied your mother, and grew up to be a cowboy ... 1.2573 0.03686 206 162 35 9
3693 Can we talk about why you want to ride to the ridge where the west commences and gaze at the moon till you lose your senses? 1.2573 0.03328 241 188 44 9
3694 There's a lot to unpack here, Rusty. I'm hearing something about lost love, betrayal, pride, and a special friendship with dog named Beau." 1.2571 0.03511 210 163 40 7
3695 Can you play anything other than A Boy Named Sue? 1.2571 0.03639 210 165 36 9
3696 Let me hum a few bars then you free associate from there. 1.2571 0.03576 210 164 38 8
3697 You didn't need to come to me just because you lost the pick in the hole. 1.2571 0.03822 210 168 30 12
3698 The theme of lonesome trail life in your songs suggests a deeper fear of intimacy. Add to that you choose to smell like hot garbage in August. 1.2571 0.03762 210 167 32 11
3699 Well, I think you’ve been bottling up a lifetime of twang. 1.2570 0.03157 249 192 50 7
3700 I can't do anything about your pickup truck and your dog. But what's that about your gal? 1.2570 0.03654 214 169 35 10
3701 OK, let's work on the harmony. 1.2570 0.03469 214 166 41 7
3702 Sing the one about your mother. 1.2570 0.03532 214 167 39 8
3703 So, according to your lyrics --- you lost your horse, pick-up truck & girlfriend? 1.2570 0.03406 214 165 43 6
3704 No, I don't think Willie really meant that when he wrote the song. 1.2570 0.03594 214 168 37 9
3705 Play me the song of your people. 1.2570 0.03654 214 169 35 10
3706 So you're saying, "Bad hombres gettin' me down." Did I get that right? 1.2569 0.03367 218 168 44 6
3707 Slower, I am tryin to get this down. We can make a fortune. 1.2569 0.03609 218 172 36 10
3708 Do you know 'My Heart Belongs to Daddy?' 1.2569 0.03781 218 175 30 13
3709 Tell me exactly what makes you feel lonesome? 1.2569 0.03490 218 170 40 8
3710 And how did it make you feel when he said “Yippee Yi Yo Kiyay!”? 1.2569 0.03429 218 169 42 7
3711 So you were down in the West Texas town of El Paso...and then? 1.2569 0.03490 218 170 40 8
3712 It's good Reggae, but I see an identity issue. 1.2568 0.03590 183 140 39 4
3713 How did that last chord make you feel? 1.2568 0.03787 222 179 29 14
3714 No, I’m afraid I just can’t possibly write you a prescription for saddle rash, Billy. But have you heard about Prozac? 1.2566 0.03523 226 178 38 10
3715 And how long has your wife been 'stringing you along', Mr. Guitar? 1.2566 0.03633 226 180 34 12
3716 What was that again about how your mother "done you wrong"? 1.2566 0.03467 226 177 40 9
3717 Insurance won’t cover it, but a shot of whisky will take care of that stage fright. 1.2566 0.03578 226 179 36 11
3718 So, if you're so damned depressed, why don't you go home to where there seldom is heard a discouraging word, the deer and the antelope play, and the skies are not cloudy all day? 1.2565 0.03873 191 151 31 9
3719 Let's explore that foolish cord change you made during your last version of 'Home On The Range.' 1.2565 0.03257 230 177 47 6
3720 Mama let me grow up to be a cowboy. 1.2565 0.03371 230 179 43 8
3721 Can we talk about your childhood? You use the word “motherfucker” instead of “father” all the time. 1.2564 0.03495 234 185 38 11
3722 Let me get this straight, "mama don't let your babies grow up to be left-handed cowboys" somehow doesn't work ... hmmm 1.2564 0.03389 234 183 42 9
3723 This session would go a lot smoother if you stopped singing. 1.2564 0.03955 195 156 28 11
3724 Do you know "Cry Me a River?" 1.2562 0.03847 203 162 30 11
3725 I’m hearing the same poor-me song over and over. 1.2562 0.03652 203 159 36 8
3726 Your friends were deer and antelope but you still felt abandoned ? Interesting. 1.2562 0.03584 203 158 38 7
3727 Say, do you know the words to “Lonesome Loser?” 1.2562 0.03652 203 159 36 8
3728 I don't see a problem--your horse, dog and wife all love you. 1.2561 0.03281 246 192 45 9
3729 Tell me more about the little dogies that won't git along. 1.2560 0.03796 207 165 31 11
3730 It's the lyin', drinkin' and stealin' where I could use the help. 1.2560 0.03540 207 161 39 7
3731 How many days did you face the barren waste without the taste of water? 1.2560 0.03796 207 165 31 11
3732 Have you heard the one about the psychiatrist and the singing cowboy? 1.2560 0.03796 207 165 31 11
3733 You are Steve from Marketing, and yet believe you are a guitar playing drifter from Oklahoma, we must get to the root of that. 1.2560 0.03540 207 161 39 7
3734 Just the lyrics. The extended "Yippie Kai-Oh-Kai-Yea" will cost you extra. 1.2560 0.03605 207 162 37 8
3735 So why do you think the long, lonely nights, just you and the dogies, make you think of your mother? 1.2560 0.03540 207 161 39 7
3736 You're my first country. All my other clients are blues singers. 1.2560 0.03473 207 160 41 6
3737 So, you met a young cowboy on the streets of Lorado and he was all dressed in white satin, which is un usual for a cowboy even in New York. Then someone shot him and you played the fife lowly. Let’s look at this symbolically. 1.2560 0.03392 250 198 40 12
3738 I'm going to need you to go back to the beginning, before you were a cowman. Tell me about your cowboyhood. 1.2560 0.03960 168 131 31 6
3739 I know it's more comfortable than sleeping on the ground, but you can't take my couch. 1.2559 0.03685 211 167 34 10
3740 Are you sure Hank done it that way? 1.2559 0.03624 211 166 36 9
3741 Why do you feel like you're singing the same old song? 1.2559 0.03685 211 167 34 10
3742 Why did you name the girl Clementine in the first place? 1.2558 0.03639 215 170 35 10
3743 You have to get on the road again ! 1.2558 0.03639 215 170 35 10
3744 Nice sublimation, cowboy. 1.2558 0.03518 215 168 39 8
3745 Okay, fine. I'll sing 'Home on the Range' one more time. Then we need to talk. 1.2557 0.03536 219 172 38 9
3746 Tell me again, but this time in the Key of C 1.2557 0.04089 176 140 27 9
3747 No, Lefty, I do not think it would help you process if I sang the Pancho part. 1.2556 0.03663 223 178 33 12
3748 No, "Three chords and the truth" is not from Freud. 1.2556 0.03663 223 178 33 12
3749 Yippee-yi-yippee-yi, we've made a breakthrough. 1.2556 0.03254 223 171 47 5
3750 Und I'm an alt cow hund 1.2555 0.03453 227 178 40 9
3751 Tell me more about this 'mama' character 1.2555 0.03396 227 177 42 8
3752 You know, apart from your hat, boots and guitar and my suit, lace-ups and notebook, we're essentially the same person. 1.2555 0.03453 227 178 40 9
3753 C, not G! Idiot." 1.2555 0.03725 227 183 30 14
3754 Do you think the music might be coming from inside you? 1.2554 0.03414 231 181 41 9
3755 Whoahhhhh home on derange... 1.2554 0.03628 231 185 33 13
3756 I believe a new genre can cure your "cowboy blues.' This week, Billy Bob, I'd like you to play ABBA's greatest hits five times a day. 1.2554 0.03302 231 179 45 7
3757 Okay, so why are we feeling like a minor and not a major today? 1.2554 0.03414 231 181 41 9
3758 So your sweetheart left you, your dog died, and your horse is tired of your song selections. 1.2554 0.03469 231 182 39 10
3759 No, I don't want to hear your cover of 'Africa'. 1.2553 0.03430 235 185 40 10
3760 Why don't we change 'orange' to 'blue'? 1.2553 0.03430 235 185 40 10
3761 It's a shame about the 'lil doggies', but perhaps you'll find closure playing a high, lonesome D instead of that mournful G. 1.2553 0.03430 235 185 40 10
3762 I sounds like my interpretation really struck a chord. 1.2552 0.03232 239 185 47 7
3763 Low self-esteem huh? Pretty common in losers like you. 1.2552 0.03339 239 187 43 9
3764 Bury you not on the lone prairie; dressed in white linen and cold as the clay? I smell a death wish down there. 1.2551 0.03662 196 153 36 7
3765 Before we begin : thank you for the endless supply of clients you sent my way over the years. This one's on the house. 1.2551 0.03937 196 157 28 11
3766 The’re just song lyrics, don’t take them so literally. 1.2550 0.03473 200 154 41 5
3767 Oh, that's sweet man. Know any good blues numbers? Your hour isn't up. 1.2550 0.03683 200 157 35 8
3768 I wouldn't fret about it. Just tune out those troublesome refrains. 1.2550 0.03614 200 156 37 7
3769 Vat is dis Home on Zee Range and vat are dese aneemals playing Vyatt. 1.2549 0.03501 204 158 40 6
3770 HMM.......can you sing more about that? 1.2549 0.03830 204 163 30 11
3771 It would be therapeutically advisable for you to learn what follows 'treat me like a fool; treat me mean and cruel'! 1.2548 0.03251 208 158 47 3
3772 Can you play "Melancholy Baby"? 1.2548 0.03840 208 167 29 12
3773 Your poor guitar playing may be why you are alienating people. 1.2547 0.03546 212 166 38 8
3774 Your so lonesome you could what? Cry? Die? Let’s add a session. 1.2547 0.03608 212 167 36 9
3775 So, tell me more about your interest in hip hop. 1.2547 0.03351 212 163 44 5
3776 Now, let's discuss your horse's relationship with her mother. 1.2547 0.03670 212 168 34 10
3777 I hear you saying that they will be coming around the mountain when they come...how does that make you feel? 1.2547 0.03730 212 169 32 11
3778 Tell me more about your mother's relationship with your pickup truck. 1.2547 0.03730 212 169 32 11
3779 Do you think 'Git Along Little Dogies' represents an unconscious struggle with repressed desires? 1.2546 0.03314 216 166 45 5
3780 Sometimes a banjo is just a banjo. Sometimes... 1.2546 0.03683 216 172 33 11
3781 So you say you've got the blues. 1.2545 0.03694 220 176 32 12
3782 Let's revisit and unpack that second verse again. 1.2545 0.03580 220 174 36 10
3783 Vell, that's leaves no one else to blame because your mama tried. 1.2545 0.03402 220 171 42 7
3784 Now have you ever considered major chords? 1.2545 0.03580 220 174 36 10
3785 When I hear you say, "I was born under a wanderin' star" what I'm really hearing is, "Maybe I should go back to school and get that degree... 1.2545 0.03480 224 176 39 9
3786 Dave, I think the number of costume parties you're attending is unhealthy. 1.2545 0.03363 224 174 43 7
3787 Maybe you should've married the truck instead. 1.2544 0.03605 228 182 34 12
3788 So, you seem to be expressing the feeling that you’d rather be in some dark holler, where the sun don’t never shine... 1.2543 0.03881 173 135 32 6
3789 So you're telling me you grew up in a home of the de-ranged where often was heard a discouraging word. 1.2543 0.03456 232 183 39 10
3790 My advice to head your troubles off at the pass. 1.2542 0.03255 236 183 46 7
3791 How exactly were they using their horns and antlers in this "play"? 1.2541 0.03393 244 193 40 11
3792 Serenading is a defense mechanism. 1.2541 0.03134 244 188 50 6
3793 Why don't we try again, in a major scale? 1.2539 0.03694 193 151 35 7
3794 One more “Get Along Little Dogies” and your time is up. 1.2539 0.03907 193 154 29 10
3795 I am going to recommend that you stop playing the blues 1.2539 0.03837 193 153 31 9
3796 Where exactly do you feel your Mama went wrong? 1.2539 0.03620 193 150 37 6
3797 Don’t you have any problems other than missing your damn horse? 1.2538 0.03716 197 155 34 8
3798 Repeatedly playing, "The Streets of Laredo," is not what I meant by finding a therapeutic hobby. 1.2537 0.03865 201 161 29 11
3799 No, Larry, you did not time travel from the Civil War, because that guitar is left-handed and those boots are from the clearance rack at Target. Try again. 1.2537 0.03750 205 163 32 10
3800 Let me summarize our sessions. First, you can't play that thing worth a lick. Second, your singing simply stinks. And third, your "Yee Haa" sounds more like "Hee Haw". You have every right to be depressed. 1.2536 0.03701 209 166 33 10
3801 We’ve established you’re a rhinestoned cowboy...now what? 1.2536 0.03376 209 161 43 5
3802 Was it always about your rifle, your pony and you? 1.2536 0.03308 209 160 45 4
3803 Now play "Happy Trails"...a great mood elevator 1.2536 0.03575 209 164 37 8
3804 You say it looks like a womm'n, it sounds like a womm'n and you lurve it like a womm'n... But Tex I have to break it to ya: it ain't a womm'n. 1.2536 0.03575 209 164 37 8
3805 Yes, Crazy is a wonderful song, but I think it may be a bit self-defeatist at this point. 1.2536 0.03376 209 161 43 5
3806 And why do you think this gig will be your last rodeo? 1.2536 0.03510 209 163 39 7
3807 Yippee ky yi yo doesn’t seem to get to the core of what you want to resolve. 1.2535 0.03468 213 166 40 7
3808 It is $300 per session and no you cannot sing instead... 1.2535 0.03468 213 166 40 7
3809 Tell me how it feels to always sing the same old song." 1.2535 0.03593 213 168 36 9
3810 Please tell me the acoustic version. 1.2535 0.03774 213 171 30 12
3811 Jedidiah, not every country road takes you home. Ok? 1.2535 0.03593 213 168 36 9
3812 Maybe tomorrow a bullet will find you, but tonight nothing's worse than the pain in your heart. 1.2535 0.03774 213 171 30 12
3813 If you play 'I'm headin' for the last Roundup' once more I'm leaving. 1.2535 0.03668 217 173 33 11
3814 Tell me more about this - uhhh - Foggy Mountain Breakdown. 1.2535 0.03668 217 173 33 11
3815 Have the little doggies not been gitin along? 1.2535 0.03301 217 167 45 5
3816 No...I don't think I have heard the eighteenth verse! 1.2535 0.03550 217 171 37 9
3817 Why do you think it annoys you that I tap my toes? 1.2535 0.03489 217 170 39 8
3818 How does the chorus make you feel? 1.2535 0.03550 217 171 37 9
3819 So, let me get this straight, Senator Warren. You say you are a direct descendant of Pancho Villa. 1.2534 0.03679 221 177 32 12
3820 So, tell me more about these "friends in low places." 1.2534 0.03623 221 176 34 11
3821 You may have been born a ramblin' man, but you don't have to stay a ramblin' man. 1.2534 0.03448 221 173 40 8
3822 You sound like a broken record. 1.2534 0.03566 221 175 36 10
3823 So you finally got that home where the buffalo roam, but.... something still wasn't right...do want to talk about that? 1.2534 0.03507 221 174 38 9
3824 Play me that part about, “dressed in white linen,” again. 1.2533 0.03523 225 178 37 10
3825 Have you considered a peppier bridge? 1.2533 0.03523 225 178 37 10
3826 So, you played it backwards and the dog still died, and the truck was still totaled, but your wife came back? 1.2533 0.03688 225 181 31 13
3827 Have you tried a major chord? 1.2533 0.03409 225 176 41 8
3828 Being left handed can cause a lot of problems. 1.2533 0.03409 225 176 41 8
3829 So you're saying that being a lefty has hurt you in the country music community? 1.2532 0.03442 233 184 39 10
3830 'Yes,yes, I know - the crop's have failed, your wife's left you and you're drinking too much. We've done it to death.' 1.2531 0.03418 241 191 39 11
3831 So your horse died, your wife left you and then the drinking started. 1.2531 0.03367 241 190 41 10
3832 Since I don't sing well, how about you talk? 1.2526 0.03820 194 154 31 9
3833 You need to mourn your losses—your mother, your dog, your truck.... 1.2526 0.03889 194 155 29 10
3834 Accept it, cowboy.There is no place on earth where the deer and the antelope PLAY and there's NEVER a cloud in the sky! 1.2525 0.03699 198 156 34 8
3835 Let's unpack this idea where you say there is seldom a discouraging word 1.2525 0.03629 198 155 36 7
3836 Have you considered how your truck feels? 1.2525 0.03411 198 152 42 4
3837 What motivated you to move to El Paso? and let’s explore this Mexican girl you fell in love with... 1.2525 0.03558 198 154 38 6
3838 Well, at least you’re not in denial. If anything, you need to be in denial a little more. 1.2525 0.03784 202 161 31 10
3839 I'm not singin' until you pay the cover charge. 1.2525 0.03848 202 162 29 11
3840 So you were an old cowhand from the Rio Grande, and how did that make you feel? 1.2525 0.03651 202 159 35 8
3841 So, tell me about the banjos. 1.2525 0.03848 202 162 29 11
3842 Well, 'a tear in your beer' can be a symptom of neurosis. 1.2524 0.03605 206 162 36 8
3843 Sounds like you blame your mama for letting you grow up." 1.2524 0.03670 206 163 34 9
3844 Now tell me what home on the range was really like. 1.2524 0.03670 206 163 34 9
3845 I've always been a Cole Porter man,myself. 1.2524 0.03605 206 162 36 8
3846 So your woman left you and your dog died ... how do you feel about that? 1.2524 0.03538 206 161 38 7
3847 Play it again, Rowdy 1.2524 0.03859 206 166 28 12
3848 I'm afraid you are suffering from Prius envy. 1.2524 0.03859 206 166 28 12
3849 Again, your willy is not Willie. 1.2524 0.03925 210 171 25 14
3850 So you are left handed. How does that make you feel? 1.2524 0.03430 210 163 41 6
3851 Have you ever told this "wicked Felina" the way you feel about her? 1.2524 0.03747 210 168 31 11
3852 Home on the range? You mean a stove? 1.2524 0.03560 210 165 37 8
3853 What I'm hearing is your life has too much discord. 1.2523 0.03639 214 170 34 10
3854 Therapist: “Sing me the one where the guy ends up being his own grandfather.” 1.2523 0.03390 214 166 42 6
3855 Ok . . . You're lonesome. And you are having recurring dreams about tumbleweeds. And you cannot find a good chord ptogression in the key of G . . . 1.2523 0.03475 218 171 39 8
3856 If you’re so lonesome you could cry, I’d suggest a change in musical genre. 1.2523 0.03435 222 174 40 8
3857 You say yer Maw whupped you with a stick? 1.2523 0.03664 222 178 32 12
3858 Sure, Sir Paul plays left-handed, too; but don't you think the comparison stops there? 1.2522 0.03395 226 177 41 8
3859 Let's talk about your mama's involvement in your growing up as a cowboy. 1.2522 0.03453 226 178 39 9
3860 Will you please tune that damn guitar of yours...and learn another song... 1.2522 0.03469 230 182 38 10
3861 And how does dressing in costume for therapy make you feel? 1.2522 0.03523 230 183 36 11
3862 We're just a couple of Billy Crystal movies, you and I. 1.2522 0.03469 230 182 38 10
3863 Perhaps you'd like too discuss the change from major to minor. 1.2522 0.03681 230 186 30 14
3864 Do you know Melancholy Baby? 1.2522 0.03469 230 182 38 10
3865 I’d rather you didn’t sing your story, Mr. Boone 1.2514 0.04189 183 149 22 12
3866 So exactly when did you realize that your woman stole your truck and ran off with your best friend leaving you home alone on the range? 1.2513 0.03836 187 148 31 8
3867 Sing me more about that. 1.2513 0.03818 199 159 30 10
3868 Admitting that your heart has been feeling achy breaky since the divorce is an excellent first step Johnny Rae. Now let's see if we can dig a little deeper. 1.2513 0.03613 199 156 36 7
3869 You're living in the past, cowboy. 1.2513 0.03884 199 160 28 11
3870 So you missed the bus to Nashville, then... 1.2512 0.03567 203 159 37 7
3871 Perhaps there’s a correlation between your use of more discouraging words as the clouds of climate change have increased in your home range. 1.2512 0.03894 203 164 27 12
3872 Why do you think you can’t get along with Little Doggie? 1.2512 0.03498 203 158 39 6
3873 It's funny, my drummer client said the same thing 1.2512 0.03523 207 162 38 7
3874 For a singing cowboy you seem very alienated. 1.2512 0.03523 207 162 38 7
3875 My fee is higher when I have to listen to bad music 1.2512 0.03589 207 163 36 8
3876 Well, wearing pants is a good start to drawing in an audience. 1.2512 0.03718 207 165 32 10
3877 The source of your problem is that you are holding the guitar upside down. You keep trying to play 'Home on the Range", but it comes out sounding more like 'Stairway to Heaven'" 1.2512 0.03481 211 165 39 7
3878 It appears our twang is up" 1.2512 0.03608 211 167 35 9
3879 So how long have you had this fear of horses? 1.2512 0.03545 211 166 37 8
3880 What I hear you saying is that you want to get your wife back, your job back, and your house back. 1.2512 0.03564 215 170 36 9
3881 Your horse cannot be a service dog even if his name Fido. 1.2512 0.03684 215 172 32 11
3882 It's just a song. You don't have to like roaming buffalo or watching deer and antelope play. 1.2511 0.03400 219 171 41 7
3883 Let's reconsider your role in the doggie's misfortune. 1.2511 0.03580 219 174 35 10
3884 So your woman done left you, alone and feeling blue, and that left you with some serious commitment issues? 1.2511 0.03176 223 171 48 4
3885 Get a life, Hank. Mom never said she thought more of me than you. 1.2511 0.03537 223 177 36 10
3886 Juan, has it ever occurred to you that come in here every session and sing the same old tune? 1.2511 0.03605 227 182 33 12
3887 So, you say your bucket's got a hole in it and your so lonesome you could cry? 1.2511 0.03382 227 178 41 8
3888 I told her to stand by her man, but she said I had a cheatin' heart. So I told her to get her biscuits in the oven, and her buns in bed. 1.2511 0.03324 227 177 43 7
3889 So, we reach the end of the lonesome trail, let's talk about your mother. 1.2511 0.03551 227 181 35 11
3890 I'm hearing more negative self-talk, John; and yet another double negative. 1.2511 0.03496 227 180 37 10
3891 When you sing, “oh give me a home, where the buffalo roam”; are you referring to your parents? 1.2511 0.03171 231 178 48 5
3892 So how long have you had these feelings of being alone and lonesome cowboy? 1.2511 0.03197 235 182 47 6
3893 If you can always mention your horse, I can always mention your mother. 1.2511 0.03573 235 189 33 13
3894 Have you considered hip hop? 1.2511 0.03521 235 188 35 12
3895 You're supposed to be depressed. 1.2500 0.03261 220 170 45 5
3896 Sorry, but that does NOT rhyme with "Oedipal." 1.2500 0.03601 232 187 32 13
3897 Life wouldn’t be such a problem if you’d learn another song. 1.2500 0.03348 224 175 42 7
3898 How long has your mood been affected by cloudy skies? 1.2500 0.03442 208 162 40 6
3899 I'm fine with you playing guitar for the whole session but I don't know how Scarborough Fair is relevant. 1.2500 0.03314 240 189 42 9
3900 You say it helps with your anxiety? Can you teach me to play that thing? 1.2500 0.03609 216 172 34 10
3901 And just how long have you been singing the blues? 1.2500 0.03523 224 178 36 10
3902 so your daddy was a gambler down in Georgia... 1.2500 0.03623 220 176 33 11
3903 Out in the West Texas town of El Paso I fell in love with a Mexican girl" Get over it. 1.2500 0.03447 220 173 39 8
3904 As you know the rate is double for couples therapy. 1.2500 0.04035 188 152 25 11
3905 Schoenberg always leaves you with this feeling, doesn't he? 1.2500 0.03466 224 177 38 9
3906 Hmm, round them up you say ... What else can you tell me about these "dogies" ? 1.2500 0.03426 228 180 39 9
3907 I can’t get along with my dogies. 1.2500 0.03764 208 167 30 11
3908 So you’ve often heard a discouraging word? 1.2500 0.03362 216 168 42 6
3909 I don't think I can be of assistance - you have nothing to say, your instrument is out of place, your boots on my couch are offensive and my gig is opera. 1.2500 0.03330 244 193 41 10
3910 Tell me more about these deer and antelope who no longer play. 1.2500 0.03785 196 156 31 9
3911 How long have you been stuck on that cord? 1.2500 0.03680 220 177 31 12
3912 How do I get to Carnegie Hall? I usually take an Uber. 1.2500 0.03404 236 187 39 10
3913 Unfortunately, climate change has a lot of us trying to cope with many discouraging words and skies cloudy all day. 1.2500 0.03638 208 165 34 9
3914 So your horse sang the whole song or just part of it? 1.2500 0.03549 232 186 34 12
3915 It sounds like the blues is playing you. 1.2500 0.03597 200 157 36 7
3916 You know, of course, that Segovia’s mother gave him a guitar to cover inappropriate erections. 1.2500 0.03715 212 170 31 11
3917 Did it bother you that they called you "the ugly"? 1.2500 0.03549 232 186 34 12
3918 Git along lil dawgies...Do you fantasize about animals often? 1.2500 0.03644 196 154 35 7
3919 You know, this only works if you really want to change. 1.2500 0.03507 220 174 37 9
3920 This isn’t music therapy 1.2500 0.03408 224 176 40 8
3921 No, you are not the real Dolly Parton. 1.2500 0.03593 212 168 35 9
3922 And just how did you get along with this little doggie? 1.2500 0.03261 220 170 45 5
3923 So, tell me again about these deer and antelope you keep seeing. 1.2500 0.03597 200 157 36 7
3924 No, I don't think an Oedipus Complex is a good theme for a country song. 1.2500 0.03837 192 153 30 9
3925 So tell me a bit more a bit more about your maw. 1.2500 0.03507 220 174 37 9
3926 Tell me about your childhood home, home on the range. 1.2500 0.03252 228 177 45 6
3927 Listen, sicko! She's never coming 'round that mountain. 1.2500 0.03690 224 181 30 13
3928 Just one more verse of ‘Achy Breaky Heart’ and I’ll commit myself. 1.2500 0.03764 208 167 30 11
3929 Good vittles, love and kissin’? You are well on the path toward self-actualization... 1.2500 0.03716 184 144 34 6
3930 Considering you're not paying my fees you could at least play in tune ! 1.2500 0.03369 228 179 41 8
3931 Did Deer and Antelope always discourage you from joining them? 1.2500 0.03466 224 177 38 9
3932 I'm not sure how to interpret E-I-E-I-O !? 1.2500 0.03488 216 170 38 8
3933 A song about me will not cover my billable hours. 1.2500 0.03442 232 184 38 10
3934 Well Dr. it's like this, I have this dream that WILLIE NELSON is really me ! 1.2500 0.03609 216 172 34 10
3935 Tell me more about this phenomenon of seldom hearing a discouraging word on the range? 1.2500 0.03552 204 160 37 7
3936 Specifically, HOW does it make you feel like a rolling stone? 1.2490 0.03263 257 204 42 11
3937 So, what do you think makes you lonesome? 1.2490 0.03249 253 200 43 10
3938 How many little dogies had to git along, did you say? 1.2490 0.03505 241 194 34 13
3939 Listen, it’s time to stop living in the past. Your girlfriend broke up with you because you don’t have a car, and boots over pants are way out of style. 1.2490 0.03302 241 190 42 9
3940 Tell me about your home on the range. 1.2489 0.03523 229 183 35 11
3941 Just a bit more depression and you'll be topping the charts! 1.2489 0.03683 229 186 29 14
3942 No. Playing it upside-down and backward will not bring back your girl, you dog or the ranch what the bank done took away. 1.2489 0.03394 225 177 40 8
3943 Tell me something, Freud, aren't you tired tryin' to fill that void? 1.2489 0.03565 225 180 34 11
3944 Before we go any further, I need you to sign this waiver acknowledging what you are about to do could ruin your creative career. 1.2489 0.03551 221 176 35 10
3945 Your GP who referred you said you can't seem to shake those cowboy blues. 1.2489 0.03373 221 173 41 7
3946 Home on the range sounds nice. But what about your mother? 1.2489 0.03665 221 178 31 12
3947 I'm not sure the Secret Service appreciated the nuance of your rendition of "Don't Fence Me In." 1.2489 0.03551 221 176 35 10
3948 So when did you begin playing jazz? 1.2489 0.03609 221 177 33 11
3949 Let’s just begin simply with three chords and the truth. 1.2489 0.03551 221 176 35 10
3950 I'm putting you on a strict major chord regiment. 1.2488 0.03653 217 174 32 11
3951 So, when did you start singing the blues? 1.2488 0.03595 217 173 34 10
3952 And then what happened, After your dog died and your Mama got hit by the train ??? 1.2488 0.03474 217 171 38 8
3953 Why don't you try singing a song about your mother? 1.2488 0.03412 217 170 40 7
3954 Would you say you feel more 'lonesome' or 'lonely'? 1.2488 0.03535 217 172 36 9
3955 No, I don't want to yodel ! Now, may we go on with your session? 1.2488 0.03535 217 172 36 9
3956 Yes, yes, you are your own grandpa. But how does that make you feel? 1.2488 0.03349 217 169 42 6
3957 What's Pop got to do with it? You wanted to be a singing cowboy and I didn't 1.2488 0.03578 213 169 35 9
3958 Dusty, We prefer to call it as "Range Angst" 1.2488 0.03639 213 170 33 10
3959 Have you tried playing in a major key? 1.2488 0.03875 213 174 25 14
3960 So when did the doubts about Astro being the right horse for you start? 1.2488 0.03452 213 167 39 7
3961 Now, should we talk some more about your home on the range? 1.2488 0.03387 213 166 41 6
3962 OK. Let’s drop ‘Everybody”s Talkin’ ‘bout Me’ for the moment. 1.2488 0.03759 213 172 29 12
3963 Well...since you clearly don't have talent, I recommend you trade that guitar for a horse. 1.2488 0.03494 209 164 38 7
3964 I see a little Freudian slip there. "Home on the range" doesn't include "I hate cows". 1.2488 0.03427 209 163 40 6
3965 Your fixation on cow pies suggests an anal retentive personality. 1.2488 0.03809 209 169 28 12
3966 Can you tell me about your feelings without the guitar? 1.2488 0.03559 209 165 36 8
3967 And how long have you had tears in your ears from lying on your back in bed while you cried over her? 1.2488 0.03469 205 160 39 6
3968 "I'm So Lonesome I Have Broken Heart Syndrome" is clinically accurate, but I doubt it will sell many records. 1.2488 0.03604 205 162 35 8
3969 Hard Times Come Again with my next bill. 1.2488 0.03581 201 158 36 7
3970 And how did you feel when the train hit your mother? 1.2488 0.03650 201 159 34 8
3971 Sure, I’ve heard it before. But how does it make you FEEL? 1.2488 0.03367 201 155 42 4
3972 Now, tell me your problems while I write nothing down. 1.2487 0.03836 197 158 29 10
3973 I 'm picking up on the fear of commitment you have with your dogie. 1.2487 0.03601 193 151 36 6
3974 Right now I'd say I'm hanging on by a string. 1.2486 0.03777 185 146 32 7
3975 No, I will not accept a song for your co-pay. 1.2479 0.03184 242 189 46 7
3976 Sex does rhyme with Tex but it all seems too Freudian for your song 1.2479 0.03378 238 189 39 10
3977 Okay. Okay. You play better than the deer and the antelope. 1.2478 0.03343 230 181 41 8
3978 So it seems like horse therapy has really been working for you. 1.2478 0.03563 230 185 33 12
3979 Go ahead, sing whatever comes to mind. 1.2478 0.03168 230 178 47 5
3980 There are more effective ways of getting back in the saddle again besides singing about it. 1.2478 0.03495 226 180 36 10
3981 So let's circle back -- how many girls were in the tractor? 1.2477 0.03594 222 178 33 11
3982 OK. Switch seats. 1.2477 0.03594 222 178 33 11
3983 You shot the sheriff not the deputy. Sounds like guilt by association to reggae. 1.2477 0.03537 222 177 35 10
3984 And how do you feel about the Laredo streets today? 1.2477 0.03520 218 173 36 9
3985 And how did you feel after getting a long little doggie? 1.2477 0.03580 218 174 34 10
3986 Ah, ha! A Freudian Strum! 1.2477 0.03580 218 174 34 10
3987 Sure you want to rebel against being orthodox but are you sure this is the way to do it? 1.2477 0.03580 218 174 34 10
3988 That has to be the most dysfunctional "Home on the range" I've ever heard! 1.2477 0.03743 214 173 29 12
3989 Mebbe nex' time you thin' twice 'for you do her wrong. 1.2476 0.03346 210 163 42 5
3990 The problem is simple; you’re a southpaw playing a right-handed guitar! 1.2476 0.03413 210 164 40 6
3991 And your mother, she too was from the Rio Grande? 1.2476 0.03522 206 162 37 7
3992 And how will you feel when you're home on the range? 1.2476 0.03588 206 163 35 8
3993 How long have you been playing before she kicked you out? 1.2476 0.03588 206 163 35 8
3994 My wife ain’t left, dog ain’t dead and the whiskey is workin’ just fine... 1.2475 0.03634 202 160 34 8
3995 When you sing 'get a long little doggie' are you thinking dachshund? 1.2475 0.03767 202 162 30 10
3996 Facts is fact. The Yellow Rose married a dude from Tennessee. 1.2475 0.03682 198 157 33 8
3997 Do you have anything upbeat, that you care to share with me? 1.2475 0.03467 198 154 39 5
3998 Well your b string is flat and your timing off just a smidgen. 1.2475 0.03751 198 158 31 9
3999 You'll just have to get over him. 1.2474 0.03940 194 157 26 11
4000 Do you know 'I Dreamed a Dream'? 1.2474 0.03731 194 154 32 8
4001 This is not what I meant by “Let’s face the music.” 1.2474 0.03855 190 152 29 9
4002 FYI, recording these lyrics in the studio will negate our doctor patient confidentiality agreement. 1.2471 0.04091 174 140 25 9
4003 What makes you think that your horse resents your singing? 1.2468 0.03295 235 185 42 8
4004 Sing me the one about your dream again. 1.2467 0.03537 227 182 34 11
4005 Have you considered med school or law school to curb your mother's disappointment in your choice to be a cowboy? 1.2467 0.03425 227 180 38 9
4006 I m more into the blues myself. 1.2466 0.03223 223 173 45 5
4007 Well, how do you feel about all your ex’s being in Texas? 1.2466 0.03465 223 177 37 9
4008 And how did you feel when your mother told you that you had to practice? 1.2466 0.03346 223 175 41 7
4009 Now this momma... is she also a mountain? 1.2466 0.03384 219 172 40 7
4010 You're not going to go all Merle Haggard on yourself, are you? 1.2466 0.03565 219 175 34 10
4011 Would you please stop singing "Momma don't let your babies grow up to be shrinks'? 1.2466 0.03506 219 174 36 9
4012 I greatly appreciate your leaving your "shootin' irons" with my receptionist Mr. Snakeweed 1.2466 0.03624 219 176 32 11
4013 But Mom still likes you best. 1.2466 0.03446 219 173 38 8
4014 Have you tried a right handed guitar? 1.2465 0.03487 215 170 37 8
4015 Let's just hear one more for the road. 1.2465 0.03424 215 169 39 7
4016 Doc, I need a title for a song About our current political system.” Okay, How about “Clows to the left of me and Jokers to the right”. 1.2465 0.03669 215 173 31 11
4017 I'm not sure ' Home on the Range ' really holds the key for understanding your early years in Hoboken 1.2465 0.03487 215 170 37 8
4018 Chair of the Graduate Department of Philosophy is definitely a good career move for you. 1.2465 0.03487 215 170 37 8
4019 Tell me more about your home on the range. 1.2465 0.03424 215 169 39 7
4020 And what was your father's attitude about becoming a cowboy? 1.2465 0.03487 215 170 37 8
4021 Sorry, Luke, but I really don't counsel couples, so I'm afraid you've got to ditch the guitar. 1.2464 0.03399 211 165 40 6
4022 Tell me again about your dog. 1.2464 0.03332 211 164 42 5
4023 You're a strummer, not a picker. 1.2464 0.03592 211 168 34 9
4024 Know any Bach? 1.2464 0.03638 207 165 33 9
4025 And what about the rhinestones? 1.2464 0.03507 207 163 37 7
4026 Okay, Maybe theres no tellin' what that women done to you....but you've got to try 1.2464 0.03573 207 164 35 8
4027 Okay we’ve covered the 70s, now let’s move on to the 80s. 1.2464 0.03507 207 163 37 7
4028 I just keep playing it over and over again wondering what it means ... “E-I-E-I-O”. 1.2464 0.03702 207 166 31 10
4029 Did you actually see this young cowboy dying on the streets of Laredo or could you just have imagined it? 1.2464 0.03573 207 164 35 8
4030 No, I shall not breach confidentiality by telling your achy breaky heart. 1.2463 0.03618 203 161 34 8
4031 So if I'm hearing you clearly,you lost your dog, house and what was that last one? 1.2463 0.03618 203 161 34 8
4032 So how long have you felt these "Folsom Prison Blues"? 1.2463 0.03481 203 159 38 6
4033 Just so I understand this completely. Right after the foreclosure your girlfriend left you and she took your truck. But when did your dog die? 1.2463 0.03751 203 163 30 10
4034 Deep down, is the song about Sally your ex or Sally your gun? 1.2462 0.03665 199 158 33 8
4035 I am a man of constant sorrow. 1.2462 0.03734 199 159 31 9
4036 This is a new musical genre for me, so bear with me. 1.2462 0.03524 199 156 37 6
4037 I'm sorry - I can't teach you the blues. 1.2462 0.03642 195 154 34 7
4038 And how do you feel about being in the wrong key?” 1.2462 0.03642 195 154 34 7
4039 So these wolves.. can you see them now? Are they dancing here? 1.2461 0.03691 191 151 33 7
4040 So, what, exactly, do you mean, "I'm all yours in buttons and bows"? 1.2459 0.03161 244 191 46 7
4041 Crooning your history is making this more painful than it needs to be. 1.2458 0.03227 236 185 44 7
4042 I'd feel a lot more comfortable talking if you'd let me start a small campfire and put a pot of beans on. 1.2458 0.03495 236 190 34 12
4043 So you're having trouble striking a chord with your audience? 1.2458 0.03337 236 187 40 9
4044 Explain it all to me again in B flat 1.2457 0.03536 232 187 33 12
4045 And just how long have you believed that you're a professional opera singer? 1.2457 0.03483 232 186 35 11
4046 So tell me about your maw. 1.2456 0.03297 228 179 42 7
4047 You say your parents were Death Metal fans? 1.2455 0.03451 224 178 37 9
4048 So, you ‘went down to the crossroads,’ and exactly did what? 1.2455 0.03509 224 179 35 10
4049 And how are you today, Butch? At the end of our last session you were feeling lonesome... 1.2455 0.03211 224 174 45 5
4050 Have you tried alternative tunings? 1.2455 0.03451 224 178 37 9
4051 I'm just happy you're still not playing the world's smallest violin. 1.2455 0.03371 220 173 40 7
4052 I hear the three chords. Not let’s hear some truth. 1.2454 0.03594 216 173 33 10
4053 It's the same old sad song week after week after week. Your damned horse died and your evil woman did you wrong!!! It's time to change your tune, cowboy. 1.2454 0.03410 216 170 39 7
4054 You HAD a good woman, you say? 1.2453 0.03385 212 166 40 6
4055 I understand your life has been going too well lately? 1.2453 0.03514 212 168 36 8
4056 Your life sounds like a country song was a figure of speech, not a recommendation 1.2453 0.03450 212 167 38 7
4057 But, 9 - 5 you work for the government? 1.2453 0.03385 212 166 40 6
4058 Tell me about the progress you've made in moving beyond Gene Autry ripping-off your song. 1.2452 0.03622 208 166 33 9
4059 Your problem is that your guitar strung to be played with the right hand. 1.2451 0.03734 204 164 30 10
4060 Tell me how the the wall will affect your life as an old cowhand on the Rio Grande. 1.2451 0.03734 204 164 30 10
4061 Interesting. And how does it feel to be strummed by this cowboy-like guy you've described? 1.2451 0.03237 253 201 42 10
4062 So exactly when did you discover your guitar is upside down? 1.2450 0.03436 200 156 39 5
4063 Your mama didn't let you be a doctor or lawyer or such? 1.2450 0.03717 200 160 31 9
4064 Was it a minor or a major incident that brought you here? 1.2450 0.03170 249 196 45 8
4065 Tell me more about home on the range 1.2449 0.03697 196 156 32 8
4066 So you are still upset about losing a country music Grammy to Taylor Swift? 1.2449 0.03836 196 158 28 10
4067 These songs are depressing. You got anything upbeat? 1.2449 0.03405 245 197 36 12
4068 How are you getting along with them little doggies? 1.2446 0.03574 233 189 31 13
4069 You long for a home where the buffalo roam... 1.2446 0.03522 233 188 33 12
4070 So you say your troubles began with mama, a train, then prison, a gal, and a pickup truck. 1.2446 0.03361 233 185 39 9
4071 The butterfly lyric shows we're making real progress. 1.2445 0.03284 229 180 42 7
4072 So you grew up to be a cowboy despite her wishes? Tell me more about your relationship with your mother. 1.2444 0.03438 225 179 37 9
4073 Okay.....let's pick up right after git along little doggie.... 1.2444 0.03379 225 178 39 8
4074 So..........you disappointed your parents by not playing the banjo? 1.2444 0.03260 225 176 43 6
4075 It's 2019. You're in Manhattan. Perhaps you should suppress your inner singing cowpoke. 1.2443 0.03418 221 175 38 8
4076 And playing sad songs, how does that make you feel? 1.2442 0.03697 217 176 29 12
4077 And what do you think is causing the blues? 1.2442 0.03396 217 171 39 7
4078 The deliverance song isn't helping 1.2442 0.03333 217 170 41 6
4079 Just because you play Country Western doesn't mean you have to be depressed. 1.2441 0.03562 213 170 34 9
4080 You have to be honest. You can't just string me along. 1.2441 0.03500 213 169 36 8
4081 And exactly how long have you been feelin' so lonesome? 1.2441 0.03624 213 171 32 10
4082 Did you try a music teacher before ? 1.2441 0.03685 213 172 30 11
4083 If your mother was,in fact,a finger picker,that would be something to think about next session. 1.2441 0.03321 254 204 38 12
4084 Strum and yodel to me about your childhood. 1.2440 0.03410 209 164 39 6
4085 Must you be so damn depressing? 1.2440 0.03477 209 165 37 7
4086 The problem is, I'M becoming addicted to the song now. 1.2440 0.03543 209 166 35 8
4087 Yippee ki-yay, you say? 1.2440 0.03477 209 165 37 7
4088 Damn woman stole my G-string 1.2440 0.03670 209 168 31 10
4089 Well Doc, 'Git Along, Little Passive-Aggressive Dogies' may work in Manhattan, but 'Whoopie Ti Yi Yo' will do a whole lot better in Abilene. 1.2440 0.03356 250 201 37 12
4090 So, tell me what else happened in ‘Laredo,’ Phil 1.2439 0.03782 205 166 28 11
4091 Your range is impressive when consider how far we are from your home. 1.2439 0.03520 205 162 36 7
4092 It is important that you accept what the deer and the antelope played at on the range!" 1.2439 0.03451 205 161 38 6
4093 Would you like to try it with the words? 1.2439 0.03451 205 161 38 6
4094 It would help if I knew the words. 1.2439 0.03451 205 161 38 6
4095 Yes, “Paranoic, schizophrenic, killed my father, in a panic.” does scan well and has a catchy, folky feel. 1.2439 0.03381 205 160 40 5
4096 We can totally swap chairs next time, playing guitar lying down must be very awkward. 1.2439 0.03520 205 162 36 7
4097 You're going to have to open up, you don't have a discouraging word to say about anybody. 1.2438 0.03430 242 195 35 12
4098 Did your parents try to force you to play right handed? 1.2438 0.03564 201 159 35 7
4099 Actually, Slim, I WAS drunk the day my Ma got out of prison. 1.2438 0.03564 201 159 35 7
4100 So you say you have the blues? 1.2437 0.03203 238 187 44 7
4101 Although seeking help is a good idea I am not qualified to decide if you should have won a Grammy. 1.2437 0.03258 238 188 42 8
4102 I think we have a breakthrough! You're angry with your mama because she allowed her baby to grow up to be a cowboy! 1.2437 0.03312 238 189 40 9
4103 True, but Depression is much more than The Blues. 1.2437 0.03537 197 155 36 6
4104 Country Western doesn't really speak to me. Could you try the blues? 1.2436 0.03001 234 180 51 3
4105 You are a little off key. 1.2436 0.03402 234 187 37 10
4106 Maybe you should stop writing songs about your oedipus complex. People prefer songs about anxiety disorders. 1.2435 0.03506 193 151 37 5
4107 Lonesome you sang? 1.2434 0.03629 189 149 34 6
4108 ...and then my third album, "Havin' a Hoe-down with Dr. Schwartz" also went double platinum..." 1.2434 0.03307 226 178 41 7
4109 So, you feel perhaps your mother didn’t want you to grow up to be a cowboy? 1.2434 0.03307 226 178 41 7
4110 I'll waive my usual fee if you agree to credit me as co-lyricist. 1.2434 0.03247 226 177 43 6
4111 So I would say your depression began when you got kicked out of ZZ Top 1.2434 0.03307 226 178 41 7
4112 So you say that you've never felt more alive as you feel when dressed up like an old West Singing Cowboy? Let's unpack that, Mr. Bergstrom. 1.2432 0.03464 222 177 36 9
4113 It's not you. It's millennials. 1.2432 0.03522 222 178 34 10
4114 Tell me again--when did the blue skies start smiling at you? 1.2432 0.03156 222 172 46 4
4115 And when did your guitar start resisting to being tuned 1.2432 0.03522 222 178 34 10
4116 And how do you think us being separated at birth had affected you? 1.2432 0.03464 222 177 36 9
4117 Maybe it was actually you doing the leavin’. 1.2432 0.03430 185 143 39 3
4118 You can't be country unless you understand your blues. 1.2431 0.03505 218 174 35 9
4119 I have a strong sense of the source of your frustration and suggest you title your next tune "City Girls Don't Love Me 'cause I smell Like A Horse". 1.2431 0.03505 218 174 35 9
4120 So how long have you been feeling 'dischordant,' Mr. Jones? 1.2430 0.03422 214 169 38 7
4121 You have to be in tune, otherwise I can't help you. 1.2430 0.03901 214 177 22 15
4122 How soon after leaving Wall Street did you start playing guitar? 1.2430 0.03548 214 171 34 9
4123 You're depressing me! 1.2430 0.03669 214 173 30 11
4124 So, you’re not sure whether to ride off into the sunset, or get drunk at a saloon? 1.2430 0.03609 214 172 32 10
4125 After years of singing,'Git along little Dogies,' you're obviously suffering from acute separation anxiety. 1.2430 0.03548 214 171 34 9
4126 Tell me more about the buffalo that roam.. 1.2430 0.03485 214 170 36 8
4127 Sing another verse about that. 1.2430 0.03669 214 173 30 11
4128 By any chance, do you know Streets of Laredo? 1.2429 0.03654 210 169 31 10
4129 But you have a home, a home on the range. 1.2429 0.03396 210 165 39 6
4130 Tell me about the whippoorwill. 1.2429 0.03462 210 166 37 7
4131 Maybe K-Pop just isn't your genre... 1.2429 0.03528 210 167 35 8
4132 Laying down again; Setting on his couch again; Got Mamma on the brain, I’m just talkin with Sigmund Freud again,” is not the most productive analysis response, Mr. Nelson. 1.2427 0.03436 206 162 38 6
4133 Tell me again why you don't want to be buried on the lone prairie. 1.2427 0.03827 206 168 26 12
4134 I’ve heard this one before 1.2426 0.03684 202 162 31 9
4135 My politically correct analysis, it's all about your tone. 1.2426 0.03548 202 160 35 7
4136 Tell me that part again about 'Waylon, Willie, and the boys' 1.2426 0.03751 202 163 29 10
4137 When did border issues first affect your songwriting? 1.2426 0.03617 202 161 33 8
4138 And what happened after the bottle let you down? 1.2426 0.03168 235 184 45 6
4139 Okay, once more, and dig deeper this time. 1.2426 0.03110 235 183 47 5
4140 Yes, yes, continue singing..."where seldom is heard a discouraging word". OK, now we're making progress! 1.2424 0.03259 231 182 42 7
4141 So, sometimes you think you're a cow, and sometimes a boy. 1.2424 0.03733 198 159 30 9
4142 Not to worry, you'll get over the Lovesick Blues. I'm more concerned about your amorous feelings for Old Paint. 1.2424 0.03593 198 157 34 7
4143 Perhaps a bit more development of the theme of loneliness in the B section? 1.2423 0.03578 227 184 31 12
4144 Your sound is troublesome, have you tried playing right handed? 1.2423 0.03523 227 183 33 11
4145 How long has it been since your horse really enjoyed your singing?" 1.2423 0.03566 194 153 35 6
4146 An achy breaky heart you say? 1.2423 0.03490 194 152 37 5
4147 Its not a phase Doc. 1.2422 0.03270 223 175 42 6
4148 I think the real problem here is what you're wearing. 1.2422 0.03508 223 179 34 10
4149 How are these deep notes of despair, regret, hopelessness, and anguish working for you? 1.2422 0.03270 223 175 42 6
4150 So did your mother play the guitar? 1.2422 0.03731 223 183 26 14
4151 This is going to be a hit. Now tell me the next line. 1.2422 0.03508 223 179 34 10
4152 You keep singing and we have to switch seats. 1.2422 0.03565 223 180 32 11
4153 I love your 5th bar transition to G Major. 1.2421 0.03764 190 152 30 8
4154 Your wife does not appreciate ze buffaloes roaming in your home? 1.2420 0.03491 219 175 35 9
4155 'Tell me more about these low places.' 1.2420 0.03306 219 172 41 6
4156 More major, less minor. 1.2420 0.03491 219 175 35 9
4157 Your dog died, wife left you,house burnt down,kids don’t talk to you,diagnosed with a terminal illness,anything else happen last week? 1.2419 0.03892 186 150 27 9
4158 I think we both know who is really benefiting from our session today. 1.2419 0.03533 215 172 34 9
4159 Okay, now tell me again--it was your mother, girlfriend wife or dog that got run over by a truck or left you?? 1.2419 0.03408 215 170 38 7
4160 Try it right-handed, cowboy. 1.2417 0.03448 211 167 37 7
4161 Maybe give onomatopoeia a rest and move on to iambic pentameter. 1.2417 0.03513 211 168 35 8
4162 Let me make this clear, when you dress you think you're ranch dressing... 1.2417 0.03639 211 170 31 10
4163 Ridin' the range and lookin' strange - you have accomplished your goal. 1.2417 0.03448 211 167 37 7
4164 You're stuck in A Minor key. 1.2417 0.03179 240 189 44 7
4165 You know you might save a little money if you just did an open mic now and again. 1.2417 0.03234 240 190 42 8
4166 Tell me more about where the Buffalo roam. 1.2415 0.03749 207 168 28 11
4167 So it was right around the time you said you were going to hog tie and brand her that her manner changed? 1.2415 0.03686 207 167 30 10
4168 So...you’re an old cowhand, from the Rio Grand, and you’ve lost your way? 1.2415 0.03556 207 165 34 8
4169 In this session we will cover the "String Theory" verses the "Chaos Theory". 1.2414 0.03678 232 191 26 15
4170 I'd recommend Prozac or a 1 hour recording session with Dolly Parton for your depression. 1.2414 0.03533 203 161 35 7
4171 Yes, if your horse doesn't like your singing, that's his problem. But if he stops every time you start, that's your problem, isn't it? 1.2414 0.03246 232 183 42 7
4172 Mr. Autry, you've made tremendous progress, but you're still just a little pitchy. 1.2414 0.03533 203 161 35 7
4173 The refrain needs some work. 1.2414 0.03668 203 163 31 9
4174 Don’t fret. I’ll just take a few notes so you can get back in the saddle and on the road again. 1.2414 0.03799 203 165 27 11
4175 'Waylon Jennings didn't literally mean you couldn't grow up to be a cowboy.' 1.2412 0.03397 228 182 37 9
4176 So you're galloping toward Rosa's Cantina in the west Texas town of El Paso, and cowboys are shooting at you. How did you feel about the Wall? 1.2412 0.03397 228 182 37 9
4177 Cause Nationwide is on your side. 1.2412 0.03509 228 184 33 11
4178 So, to summarize . . . you cannot let go of this fear of being buried on the lone prairie . . . yes 1.2412 0.03577 199 158 34 7
4179 Have you considered playing something other than blues? 1.2412 0.03648 199 159 32 8
4180 Now where exactly did you say your home was? 1.2412 0.03506 199 157 36 6
4181 Have you always had this urge to get back on the road? 1.2412 0.03358 199 155 40 4
4182 Talk to me about the discouraging words you did hear in your home, home. 1.2411 0.03318 224 177 40 7
4183 So, tell me more about how you're lonesome now that your girlfriend left you for your best friend and your mother got caught up by the law after breaking your father out of prison in a pickup truck. 1.2411 0.03377 224 178 38 8
4184 So how did you feel when your mom hopped a train to come get you out of jail? 1.2411 0.03377 224 178 38 8
4185 Him: “How many roads can a man walk down before they call him a man?” Doctor: “The answer, my friend, is blowin’ in the wind” 1.2410 0.03836 195 158 27 10
4186 Being lonesome doesn't mean you have to cry. 1.2409 0.03229 220 172 43 5
4187 Have you considered alternatives to sad, sad songs? 1.2409 0.03594 220 178 31 11
4188 So when your girlfriend left you and your tractor broke and your dog ran away....how did that make you feel? 1.2409 0.03355 220 174 39 7
4189 I like the tune, but we've got more work to do on the lyrics. 1.2409 0.03355 220 174 39 7
4190 I agree, ‘Tumblin’ tumbleweeds’ is a great metaphor for your erratic work history. 1.2409 0.03293 220 173 41 6
4191 When did your delusions about being a singing cowboy begin, Dr. Freud? 1.2409 0.03651 220 179 29 12
4192 With all due respect, I believe I said "cigar," not "guitar!" 1.2409 0.03416 220 175 37 8
4193 You say your horse died? 1.2408 0.03890 191 155 26 10
4194 You say your cheatin' heart will make you weep, you'll cry and cry and try to sleep... and how does that make you feel? 1.2407 0.03456 216 172 36 8
4195 So you never got along with the little dogies. Was that truly their misfortune, or none of your own? 1.2407 0.03639 216 175 30 11
4196 So how did your mother's obsession with Waylon Jennings make you feel? 1.2407 0.03456 216 172 36 8
4197 Tell me more about how your little doggies are getting along. 1.2406 0.03946 187 152 25 10
4198 Tell me again about your mother ... this time, no singing. 1.2406 0.03643 187 148 33 6
4199 Slow down. That's "Zip-a-dee...what? 1.2406 0.03498 212 169 35 8
4200 Well, yes, perhaps Willie and Waylon were right. Let's pick up next week with "drive them old trucks" and see where we get. 1.2406 0.03623 212 171 31 10
4201 If she don’t understand you and you don’t die young, you’ll probably just ride away. 1.2406 0.03498 212 169 35 8
4202 I'm afraid your time is up 1.2406 0.03368 212 167 39 6
4203 Tell me something: are you happy in this modern world? 1.2406 0.03498 212 169 35 8
4204 So what comes after “I’m an old cow hand?” 1.2404 0.03773 183 146 30 7
4205 They’re bison, not “buffalo.” 1.2404 0.03606 208 167 32 9
4206 I've been cry'n me a river for as long as I can remember, Doc! 1.2404 0.03541 208 166 34 8
4207 Perhaps you should consider being more sensitive to the little dogeys' misfortune... 1.2404 0.03407 208 164 38 6
4208 Tell me where you think your fear of spaghetti started. 1.2403 0.03347 233 186 38 9
4209 Let's see here...Last week you were telling me about a girl in the town of El Paso. Are you still feeling obsessed by her? 1.2402 0.03448 204 161 37 6
4210 I’m not sure we can blame your mother for that flat note. 1.2402 0.03269 229 181 41 7
4211 Always the same tune, eh Slim? 1.2402 0.03269 229 181 41 7
4212 I’m about to lose my home on the range. 1.2400 0.03490 200 158 36 6
4213 No, I can't accept payment in rhinestone. 1.2400 0.03700 200 161 30 9
4214 one of your issues might be singing the answers to all of my questions 1.2400 0.03364 225 179 38 8
4215 Sometimes a duet is just a duet. 1.2400 0.03244 225 177 42 6
4216 Maybe the emptiness you're feeling is the absence of cowbell. 1.2400 0.03364 225 179 38 8
4217 Even though you sleep with her I can't bill this as family therapy. 1.2400 0.03898 200 164 24 12
4218 So tell me more about your move form New York to Texas. 1.2400 0.03244 225 177 42 6
4219 Tell me more about your mama. 1.2400 0.03561 200 159 34 7
4220 If you don't tune that properly, this session is over! 1.2400 0.03631 200 160 32 8
4221 I have a couple of shots of whiskey that'll help." 1.2398 0.03342 221 175 39 7
4222 No, you’re guns can’t do the talking. 1.2398 0.03216 221 173 43 5
4223 All together now 1.2398 0.03459 196 154 37 5
4224 I can imagine it is hard having Clint Eastwood as your dad. 1.2398 0.03854 171 136 29 6
4225 And how often do you dream that you're a lounge pianist? 1.2397 0.03467 242 197 32 13
4226 Yes, I'm asking you not to play 'Wagon Wheel.' 1.2397 0.03046 242 189 48 5
4227 That's the wrong key for 'El Paso.' 1.2396 0.03316 217 171 40 6
4228 My job can be lonely and boring,too,but I'd lose my license for that. 1.2396 0.03504 217 174 34 9
4229 Let me guess, your wife left you, your dog and pickup died and you thought it was a good idea to write a song about it? 1.2396 0.03442 217 173 36 8
4230 How does the realization that your dog has fleas make you feel? 1.2396 0.03564 217 175 32 10
4231 Of course your reviews are bad! You're not left-handed, are you? 1.2396 0.03504 217 174 34 9
4232 When was the first time you start seeing dingo's? 1.2396 0.03504 217 174 34 9
4233 Home, home on the range. What else do you recall? 1.2396 0.03251 217 170 42 5
4234 You do realize that you can't housetrain a buffalo? 1.2396 0.03380 217 172 38 7
4235 You said it was raining when your Mama got hit by the train? 1.2396 0.03739 217 178 26 13
4236 So far we've covered catgut, tobaccy, momma, and a regretful past...let's take it from the top. 1.2396 0.03185 217 169 44 4
4237 Have you tried singing the song in reverse? You will get your truck, dog, and girl back. 1.2395 0.03606 238 196 27 15
4238 And what age were you when did your mother start singing 'Drop Kick Me Jesus'? 1.2394 0.03669 213 173 29 11
4239 Happy trails to you, until we meet again. Happy trails to you, keep smilin' until then . . . 1.2394 0.03287 213 167 41 5
4240 Can you play some Dylan before he went electric... 1.2393 0.03164 234 184 44 6
4241 I heard Hendrix and Cobain were left-handed too. 1.2393 0.03222 234 185 42 7
4242 It’s no wonder you failed. You’re out of tune. 1.2392 0.03526 209 167 34 8
4243 A little equine therapy might be just what you need. 1.2392 0.03460 209 166 36 7
4244 Could you spell “fixun” for me? 1.2391 0.03427 230 185 35 10
4245 I agree....You're out of tune 1.2391 0.03371 230 184 37 9
4246 Now tell me more about the banjo nightmares. 1.2390 0.03502 205 163 35 7
4247 It all started when I was home, home on the range... 1.2390 0.03828 205 168 25 12
4248 No, I've never been to Texas. 1.2390 0.03636 205 165 31 9
4249 ...and you say it's some Susanna who does cry for you, right 1.2389 0.03231 226 178 42 6
4250 Find yourself a cheatin floozy and you can cut a record! 1.2389 0.03351 226 180 38 8
4251 Do you know Stairway to Heaven? 1.2389 0.03351 226 180 38 8
4252 Well I-I-I am a man of constant so-rrow... 1.2388 0.03475 201 159 36 6
4253 It seem we’ve sat and talked like this before ... 1.2388 0.03750 201 163 28 10
4254 At our next session I want to really dig into why the misfortune was none of your own 1.2388 0.03546 201 160 34 7
4255 Did you ever think about writing a song that was not so depressing? 1.2388 0.03475 201 159 36 6
4256 Can we say that Willie Nelson is not envious of you? Period 1.2387 0.03565 222 180 31 11
4257 Perhaps you should lose the boots. Cowboy poets in Wellies are a dime a dozen. 1.2387 0.03449 222 178 35 9
4258 Have you considered switching genres from country to the blues? 1.2387 0.03203 222 174 43 5
4259 Well, the way I see it is you're trying to go for a conservative audience while playing left-handed. And, by the way, I'll have to charge you for the cow pies that your boots are leaving on the divan. 1.2387 0.03449 222 178 35 9
4260 Ok, you’ve convinced me that you are a Lonesome Cowboy, but you definitely are not Elvis. 1.2387 0.03203 222 174 43 5
4261 So Mr. Levine, how’s that Kkezmer Cowboy thing working for you? 1.2386 0.03801 197 160 27 10
4262 So....you're still upset that Lucille left you, Willie? 1.2386 0.03591 197 157 33 7
4263 If you’re in a Blues mood, play ‘Get your boots off my couch’! 1.2386 0.03801 197 160 27 10
4264 How about you stop hiding behind that guitar for just one minute, Mark — just one goddamn minute, that’s all I ask after three years of doing this dance with you — and talk to me like you understand that this is your life, and you only get one? 1.2385 0.03780 218 180 24 14
4265 Would you mind gittin' your 'little dogies' off my couch? 1.2385 0.03608 218 177 30 11
4266 I'm sensing a pattern here,Dwight. 1.2385 0.03428 218 174 36 8
4267 So your wife left you and took your pickup truck and your mom got drunk and got run over by a train? Sounds like the perfect country western song. 1.2385 0.03428 218 174 36 8
4268 I wrote a song, its called "No one ever herds me. 1.2385 0.03428 218 174 36 8
4269 When did you first start feeling this way about your instrument? 1.2383 0.03531 214 172 33 9
4270 No, you’re not an old cow hand.you’re not fooling me.Shave your beard off and get a haircut.see you next week 1.2383 0.03375 235 189 36 10
4271 So..You're an old cowhand-from the Rio Grande. But you never saw a cow? Hmmmmmmm.... 1.2381 0.03378 210 166 38 6
4272 Well, that's a new tune. 1.2381 0.03358 231 185 37 9
4273 OK, next week you can be the psychiatrist! 1.2379 0.03279 227 180 40 7
4274 Playing the same old song isn't getting you past your past. 1.2379 0.03487 206 164 35 7
4275 A "home on the range" does not mean your wife enjoys being the only cook. 1.2379 0.03554 206 165 33 8
4276 And these streets of Laredo remind you of your mother? 1.2379 0.03749 206 168 27 11
4277 Buffalo meaning the team or the animal? 1.2379 0.03487 206 164 35 7
4278 Do you know "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow?" 1.2379 0.03487 206 164 35 7
4279 Since you switched to playing left handed, have you considered learning Western & Country music?" 1.2379 0.03620 206 166 31 9
4280 Maybe if you switched to a minor key ... 1.2377 0.03127 223 174 45 4
4281 I understand how 'Cowboy Junkies' might offend you. 1.2377 0.03375 223 178 37 8
4282 Don't let your babies grow up to be saddle fitters" is catchy but.. 1.2377 0.03375 223 178 37 8
4283 You're too sensitive, is the problem. Critics pounce. It's just what they do, is all. 1.2377 0.03375 223 178 37 8
4284 So come DOWN from your fences. LET somebody love you. Just do it. Do it! 1.2376 0.03863 202 166 24 12
4285 Can you tell me you plan when you get back in the saddle,again? 1.2376 0.03314 202 158 40 4
4286 All together now, this time with feeling. 1.2375 0.03165 240 190 43 7
4287 For starters, see if you could find a song that does not mention your mama, whiskey, or breakups 1.2374 0.03475 219 176 34 9
4288 Yes, I realize it is challenging to learn to play left-handed. 1.2374 0.03352 219 174 38 7
4289 I said "Sturm und Drang," not "Strum und Drang" 1.2374 0.03475 219 176 34 9
4290 There’s 5 minutes left in your session. Can you play Wonderwall? 1.2374 0.03575 198 158 33 7
4291 You're saying "singing cowboy" isn't a term you'd choose for yourself? 1.2374 0.03646 198 159 31 8
4292 Sorry, you want your Mama or your Gaga? 1.2374 0.03784 198 161 27 10
4293 Of course I like Patsy Cline. But we don't use that word in this office. 1.2372 0.03638 215 175 29 11
4294 Did you ever discuss your lonesome blues with your Mama? 1.2372 0.03454 215 172 35 8
4295 Tell me what happened after she told you to get your feet off the couch 1.2371 0.03694 194 156 30 8
4296 You’re mixing genres. It’s not “Take me Bach to Ole Kentucky! 1.2371 0.03400 232 187 35 10
4297 And vat is your association to "leetle dogeys?" 1.2371 0.03455 232 188 33 11
4298 Some trails are happy. Some trails are blue. It's the way you ride the trail that counts, Ran, but our 45-minute trails a'endin'. So happy trails to you. Until we meet again... " 1.2371 0.03289 232 185 39 8
4299 Any other issues not involving a ‘yeller dawg’? 1.2371 0.03173 232 183 43 6
4300 So you say that in your home the buffalo no longer roam and the dear and the antelope refuse to play, now why do you think that is? 1.2371 0.03289 232 185 39 8
4301 Didn't your mother teach you to keep your boots off the furniture? 1.2370 0.03227 211 165 42 4
4302 Relax. I thought you were the outstanding entertainment at the Trump Inaugural. 1.2370 0.03560 211 170 32 9
4303 When was the first time you had feelings for God, trucks, guns and beer? 1.2370 0.03364 211 167 38 6
4304 Let’s croon about your mother. 1.2370 0.03623 211 171 30 10
4305 Nice tune. But "lonesome" isn't in listed in the diagnostic and statistical manual 1.2368 0.03325 228 182 38 8
4306 Tell me Joe, where did you come from? Where did you go? 1.2368 0.03434 190 149 37 4
4307 So, “It takes a worried man to sing a worried song” however you are content in the company of cows. Hmm! 1.2367 0.03669 207 168 29 10
4308 Have you tried performing the rap music I suggested in our last session? 1.2366 0.03302 224 178 39 7
4309 OK. So you're saying your guitar only plays the blues?" 1.2366 0.03536 224 182 31 11
4310 Tell me more about Yippie-yi-yo-ki-yay 1.2366 0.03302 224 178 39 7
4311 You don't need that prop to show me your high-strung. 1.2366 0.03536 224 182 31 11
4312 But how does the broken down pickup truck make you feel? 1.2366 0.03479 224 181 33 10
4313 And when was it that your mother let you switch from violin lessons? 1.2366 0.03302 224 178 39 7
4314 Man, always the same old song! Yes, your mother chose another man over you. Now, get over it. 1.2365 0.03314 241 194 37 10
4315 Patience, my good man, the chorus is coming to me. I just need to find a word that rhymes with 'Sigmund'. 1.2365 0.03444 203 161 36 6
4316 I think "crapped his chaps" as a refrain would be an indicator of some cognitive issues. 1.2365 0.03444 203 161 36 6
4317 Let's explore more why you hate the B7 chord. 1.2365 0.03651 203 164 30 9
4318 When you have these dreams of being in Times Square, are you truly naked or still wearing tidy whities? 1.2364 0.03579 220 179 30 11
4319 So, git along little dogies, what do you really mean by that? 1.2364 0.03461 220 177 34 9
4320 This is a little ditty about my relationship with my momma 1.2364 0.03461 220 177 34 9
4321 Your lyrics are always about booze and a broken heart. Don't you ever think about your mother? 1.2364 0.03461 220 177 34 9
4322 Yippi Yi Ky-yo is a faux feeling 1.2363 0.03403 237 192 34 11
4323 I see you play left-handed. Are you always a contrarian? 1.2362 0.03629 199 160 31 8
4324 Yippie ka yay! I see your feeling better. 1.2362 0.03559 199 159 33 7
4325 It seems like your mother was a progressive. 1.2362 0.03487 199 158 35 6
4326 It's textbook border-line personality disorder 1.2361 0.03377 216 172 37 7
4327 Well this room, this room right here, really is big enough for the two of us. 1.2361 0.03440 216 173 35 8
4328 Your Mother told you, "Son, always be a good boy, don't ever play with guns," But you shot a man in Reno. And you motivation was? 1.2361 0.03502 216 174 33 9
4329 So what did your father say when you told him you preferred the high and lonesome life? 1.2361 0.03247 216 170 41 5
4330 You lament about your "achy breaky heart". I think we'll need to unpack that one. 1.2361 0.03102 233 183 45 5
4331 Did you say Si or C? 1.2361 0.03441 233 189 33 11
4332 Yes, you've got new verses this week, but you keep coming back to the same old chorus. 1.2358 0.03607 212 172 30 10
4333 And how old were you when you saw your first Coen brothers movie? 1.2358 0.03416 212 169 36 7
4334 And how did it make you feel that your mother named you Buster? 1.2358 0.03416 212 169 36 7
4335 You played it for your mother now play it for me. Play it! 1.2358 0.03072 229 179 46 4
4336 Never, a discouraging word, sometimes a little criticism not so bad. 1.2358 0.03312 229 183 38 8
4337 Jed, how about singing me one about your mother. 1.2356 0.03652 191 153 31 7
4338 I so regret not learning to play guitar." "And how did that make you feel, Doc?" 1.2356 0.03778 208 171 25 12
4339 I realize it's a sacrifice, Raoul, but unless you give up the guitar, you'll always be the sidekick. 1.2356 0.03320 208 164 39 5
4340 Mr. McFry, why do you think Polly Wolly Doodle reminds you of me? 1.2356 0.03589 208 168 31 9
4341 You're playing the right chords and you're singing the right words, but there's absolutely no harmony in your id, ego, and super-ego. 1.2356 0.03320 208 164 39 5
4342 I understand this anxiety, but no one questions your folksy sagacity, so I see no reason to insist on the term "cow-man." 1.2356 0.03289 225 179 39 7
4343 If you're really that down and out, I'm afraid this will have to be our last session. 1.2356 0.03349 225 180 37 8
4344 Are your spurs that go jingle jangle jingle in the closet? 1.2356 0.03407 225 181 35 9
4345 Sing your heart out, Leon. 1.2356 0.03522 225 183 31 11
4346 And can you tell me how that made you feel without the singing? 1.2353 0.03387 221 177 36 8
4347 So that was the gift from your horse's mouth? 1.2353 0.03621 221 181 28 12
4348 I know you're struggling with abandonment issues, but not everybody is a doggie who is about to git along. 1.2353 0.03286 204 160 40 4
4349 Would you please refrain from calling it the Psych Office Dirge again? 1.2353 0.03635 204 165 30 9
4350 Nice song. How does it make you feel? 1.2353 0.03229 238 190 40 8
4351 Do you know "Wind Beneath My Wings"? 1.2353 0.03700 204 166 28 10
4352 And just how do you feel about these deer and antelope? 1.2353 0.03199 221 174 42 5
4353 The devil wasn't buying, by the sound of it. 1.2353 0.03499 204 163 34 7
4354 I'd like to start with a little something I wrote about my early years... 1.2350 0.03374 234 189 35 10
4355 Play it Sam. You played it for her, you can play it for me. 1.2350 0.03149 234 185 43 6
4356 I pronounce your cowboy conversion therapy 100% successful! 1.2350 0.03426 217 174 35 8
4357 This next one is very personal. 1.2350 0.03426 217 174 35 8
4358 Tell me again where you're from? 1.2350 0.03299 217 172 39 6
4359 So . . . how long have you harbored this resentment toward your father for not being there the night you were drunk and your mother was released from prison? 1.2350 0.03234 217 171 41 5
4360 Maybe try that in a major key 1.2350 0.03323 200 157 39 4
4361 Could you elaborate on your feelings behind “Yippy I Oh Ki-ah”? 1.2350 0.03471 200 159 35 6
4362 So, Tex, how long have you been feeling lonesome? 1.2350 0.03323 200 157 39 4
4363 Of course I love my mother. All cowboys do. What’s your point? 1.2348 0.03182 230 182 42 6
4364 How about a song that doesn’t include your Mother . 1.2348 0.03241 230 183 40 7
4365 NO, playing the guitar with your left hand has nothing to do with your mother not loving you... 1.2348 0.03299 230 184 38 8
4366 Apart from Dolly Parton, is there anyone -anyone at all that you dream about? 1.2348 0.03412 230 186 34 10
4367 Perhaps you should try humming rather than strumming and stop stringing me along." 1.2348 0.03299 230 184 38 8
4368 Yes, 'Home on the Couch' was the unofficial anthem of Freud. 1.2347 0.03530 213 172 32 9
4369 It wants to sound like a Banjo? 1.2347 0.03336 213 169 38 6
4370 Well, partner, ya think we got one last song in us? 1.2347 0.03269 213 168 40 5
4371 I will venture to say you're right-handed. 1.2347 0.03888 213 178 20 15
4372 So your dog died and your'e in a relationship with your truck, but mama tried. 1.2347 0.03588 196 157 32 7
4373 Then try this; 'Bill or George! Anything but Sue! ' 1.2347 0.03731 196 159 28 9
4374 So why do you think you dream about accordians? 1.2347 0.03514 196 156 34 6
4375 So, you were sitting around a campfire eating beans and passing gas, and then what happened? 1.2347 0.03514 196 156 34 6
4376 Tell me more about this place where the deer antelope play 1.2347 0.03869 196 161 24 11
4377 So.....Her dog don’t bite nobody but you? 1.2346 0.03391 243 198 33 12
4378 So... last week you mentioned you were worried about the cattle? 1.2346 0.03289 243 196 37 10
4379 Given the number of specific references in your songs, is there more you care to tell me about your 'little doggies' and 'Old Paint'? 1.2345 0.03276 226 180 39 7
4380 This was a good session. Next week, how about you role-play Cher and ‘If I Could Turn Back Time.’ 1.2345 0.03508 226 184 31 11
4381 Let's go back to the size of her shoes. 1.2345 0.03335 226 181 37 8
4382 This 'home on the range' sounds to me like an acute narcissistic delusion. 1.2344 0.03442 209 167 35 7
4383 Yeah, but 'you're a lying, cheating SOB' still doesn't rhyme with 'orange.' 1.2344 0.03637 209 170 29 10
4384 OK, Tex, so you say you're from Texas, but you're actually from Louisiana but you hated be called Louise, right? 1.2344 0.03375 209 166 37 6
4385 Maybe it’s time to let the old ways die, Jedidiah... 1.2344 0.03508 209 168 33 8
4386 Mr. Hardin, it could be more productive if you didn’t play Y.M.C.A. the entire session. 1.2344 0.03637 209 170 29 10
4387 What exactly do you mean when you say your wife is a “nag”? 1.2344 0.03635 192 154 31 7
4388 Tell me more about the tumbling tumbleweeds. 1.2344 0.03635 192 154 31 7
4389 So Willy, how long have you been sober? 1.2342 0.03373 222 178 36 8
4390 I admit I didn't immediately recognize you Mr. President, but I do believe if you insist on putting out an album it could work against you. 1.2342 0.03373 222 178 36 8
4391 Home, home of the strange. 1.2342 0.03492 222 180 32 10
4392 You said that your mother strung you along? 1.2342 0.03312 222 177 38 7
4393 Just pick your problem. 1.2341 0.03344 205 162 38 5
4394 Instead of driving cattle, why don't we take a moment to discover what drives you? 1.2341 0.03484 205 164 34 7
4395 Sometimes a long little dogie is just a long little dogie. 1.2339 0.03534 218 177 31 10
4396 What about a session without instrumental accompaniment? 1.2339 0.03286 218 173 39 6
4397 The bro-country fad should be over soon. Hang in there. 1.2339 0.03089 248 197 44 7
4398 So, you sang it backwards, but still you didn't get back your wife, your home, your dog, and your car 1.2338 0.03597 201 162 31 8
4399 I will need you to respond with more than a yodeling 'Yippie yi ooh, Yippie yi yay.' 1.2338 0.03228 231 184 40 7
4400 How do you think YOU reduce the discouraging words? 1.2336 0.03188 214 168 42 4
4401 Well, Tex, if she’s never even called you by your name, do you really expect her now to start calling you Darlin’? 1.2336 0.03388 214 171 36 7
4402 Cain't seem to scare up a rhyme fer "psychotropic." It's gittin' me down! 1.2336 0.03515 214 173 32 9
4403 You're going to have to learn something other than Tosca. 1.2336 0.03577 214 174 30 10
4404 Subconsciously, you want to play the bassoon. 1.2336 0.03452 214 172 34 8
4405 Well, why don't you try to use an 'I feel' song? 1.2336 0.03388 214 171 36 7
4406 Or, you can sing about your childhood... 1.2336 0.03515 214 173 32 9
4407 Your hour is almost up but I think we can finish the song next week - and have time to discuss your writers block. 1.2336 0.03388 214 171 36 7
4408 Freebird! 1.2336 0.03428 244 200 31 13
4409 .....and this began after you saw ‘The Ballad of Buster Scruggs’? 1.2335 0.03424 197 156 36 5
4410 Have you tried changing your tone? 1.2335 0.03783 197 161 26 10
4411 You say, that you come from Alabama with a banjo on your knee, but the problem is that, you're holding the wrong instrument! 1.2335 0.03714 197 160 28 9
4412 Lets begin, go ahead sing me a river 1.2335 0.03498 197 157 34 6
4413 Let's explore your fixation with Home on the Range. 1.2335 0.03263 227 181 39 7
4414 You know, you're not the only left handed guitarist in the world! 1.2333 0.03292 210 166 39 5
4415 Uh-huh, let’s see - wife left you, truck broke down, dog died ... are there any happy, uplifting country songs? 1.2333 0.03038 240 189 46 5
4416 Let me get this straight, you are a Frito Bandito? 1.2333 0.03787 180 145 28 7
4417 So, your heifer done skedadled; your best buckaroo turned into a four flusher. Your life is a bag on nails. Time to cut and run. 1.2333 0.03361 210 167 37 6
4418 Sorry, not that kind of fine-tuning. 1.2333 0.03205 240 192 40 8
4419 You’re not alone, ranger. 1.2333 0.03622 210 171 29 10
4420 You say your hat was thrown back and your spurs were a jinglin'? Interesting. 1.2333 0.03494 210 169 33 8
4421 Tell me more about that third verse about your mother. 1.2332 0.03174 223 176 42 5
4422 Sorry but I don’t speak in twang 1.2332 0.03237 223 177 40 6
4423 If you let me record these sessions, I would like to be your music agent. 1.2331 0.03126 236 187 43 6
4424 I will admit that your descriptions of your troubles are quite lyrical. 1.2330 0.03925 176 143 25 8
4425 Yeah, my baby left me, too, but I'm quite upbeat about it. 1.2329 0.03272 219 174 39 6
4426 The only shame in playing the guitar is the shame of not playing it well! 1.2329 0.03208 219 173 41 5
4427 Why not move from Laredo to El Paso, Mr. Robbins? 1.2329 0.03398 219 176 35 8
4428 How 'bout 'Magic Carpet Ride' by Steppenwolf..." 1.2329 0.03336 219 175 37 7
4429 And going naked is not an option? 1.2329 0.03519 219 178 31 10
4430 So, how did it make you feel when you first found out there was no gold in them thar hills? 1.2328 0.03345 189 148 38 3
4431 Instead of playing the guitar, why don't you sit and write like I do? You will find it takes your mind off things and then you get a check! 1.2328 0.03330 232 187 36 9
4432 After 3 years of therapy, you still blame your dad for your gender dysphoria ... But do you have to Sue him? 1.2328 0.03386 232 188 34 10
4433 Sing me a ballad about your early childhood. 1.2327 0.03441 202 161 35 6
4434 I don't care what the song says, it's still a Ten-step program. 1.2327 0.03511 202 162 33 7
4435 So, let me get this straight...you want your best friend to runaway with your wife? 1.2327 0.03716 202 165 27 10
4436 You dream you’re performing at the Grand Ole Opry- how literally should I take this? 1.2327 0.03214 245 197 39 9
4437 Have you considered cowboying up? 1.2326 0.03682 215 177 26 12
4438 But Tex, these feelings of abandonment are the natural result of your express desire for the little dogies to git along. 1.2326 0.03374 215 172 36 7
4439 Your left-handedness obviously has given you an inferiority complex and is making you sing these depressing songs. 1.2326 0.03242 215 170 40 5
4440 I was sure the hat would cure the writer’s block. 1.2326 0.03374 215 172 36 7
4441 It seems you are strung out. 1.2326 0.03500 215 174 32 9
4442 How do you feel the transition from Wall Street is going? Frank Buckley Andover, MA 1.2326 0.03438 215 173 34 8
4443 Sing to me about your relationship with your mother. 1.2326 0.03438 215 173 34 8
4444 Have you thought about trading the Martin for a Fender? 1.2325 0.03190 228 181 41 6
4445 You suffer from harmonic stress! I think I know of a tonic that will resolve this discord. 1.2324 0.03716 185 149 29 7
4446 You say your dog and baby done left you... 1.2324 0.03139 241 192 42 7
4447 No, sorry, I won't trade therapy for a song. 1.2324 0.03247 241 194 38 9
4448 My mamma told me not to grow up to be a cowboy. 1.2323 0.03697 198 161 28 9
4449 Now lets see if we can shrink this tune down to 3 minutes. 1.2322 0.03606 211 172 29 10
4450 So, all these buffalo and deer and antelope inside your home; wouldn't that be messy? 1.2322 0.03413 211 169 35 7
4451 It's time to face reality Quick Draw Salinger, the closest you've ever been to the Wild West is Greenwich Village. 1.2322 0.03209 211 166 41 4
4452 Have you tried strumming with your right hand? 1.2322 0.03346 211 168 37 6
4453 How do you spell "oh yippie yi yo kayah?" 1.2322 0.03729 211 174 25 12
4454 I don't like the way this is going. So give me my hat, boots and guitar back this role reversal is not working. 1.2321 0.03405 224 181 34 9
4455 You know, you can't sing your way out of everything. 1.2321 0.03224 224 178 40 6
4456 When I said ‘bring your baggage,’ I didn’t mean your guitar. 1.2321 0.03346 224 180 36 8
4457 Dave, sing me a few verses of your first bi-polar experience; or is it Mike? 1.2321 0.03346 224 180 36 8
4458 Before we move on, do you know 'Wonderwall'? 1.2321 0.03098 224 176 44 4
4459 Let me sort this out...Since Pancho bit the dust, you are unable to sing and you want to move to Cleveland. Is that correct ? 1.2321 0.03224 224 178 40 6
4460 Maybe the little dogies took you seriously and got along because of your singing. 1.2321 0.03171 237 189 41 7
4461 Crazy” isn’t just a song by Willy Nelso 1.2321 0.03282 237 191 37 9
4462 When did you first realize you were a Hassid locked in a guita-pickers body? 1.2321 0.03282 237 191 37 9
4463 Explain to me how someone's favorite color could possibly be chrome. 1.2320 0.03450 194 154 35 5
4464 It happened out in the West Texas town of El Paso 1.2320 0.03675 194 157 29 8
4465 ...and what are your personal memories of these 'streets' in this so-called 'Laredo'? 1.2319 0.03244 207 163 40 4
4466 Let's go back to the verse where you're herding cats. 1.2319 0.03521 207 167 32 8
4467 So tell me more about your horse’s mother 1.2319 0.03587 207 168 30 9
4468 Sorry, but you can not bring your horse for your next appointment! 1.2318 0.03384 220 177 35 8
4469 Tell me more, but this time without singing it to me 1.2318 0.03322 220 176 37 7
4470 I think it should start with "Nationwide is on your side." 1.2318 0.03481 233 191 30 12
4471 I see. And have you tried learning something besides the Blues? 1.2316 0.03493 190 151 34 5
4472 Patient hears voices that are autotuned. 1.2315 0.03426 203 162 35 6
4473 Perhaps you could consider a career change. 1.2315 0.03360 216 173 36 7
4474 Let's discuss that last song, 'You Can't Go Home on the Range Again.' 1.2315 0.03360 216 173 36 7
4475 I’m always in character. You, too? 1.2315 0.03547 216 176 30 10
4476 So long have you been feeling strung out? 1.2315 0.03486 216 175 32 9
4477 Just play that backwards and you can get it all back - your wife, your dog, your job, your truck. Then you'll be able to pay me. 1.2315 0.03295 216 172 38 6
4478 What say you hand me the guitar and we trade places? 1.2315 0.03360 216 173 36 7
4479 At least, we have facial hair in common. 1.2315 0.03162 216 170 42 4
4480 ...but have you ever thought to ask yourself "Am I ready for some football?" 1.2315 0.03423 216 174 34 8
4481 So you're saying you're this way because of your "mama"? 1.2315 0.03360 216 173 36 7
4482 Yes, that was nice. But returning to your mother... 1.2314 0.03521 229 188 29 12
4483 And when did your guitar decide that you had to sing everything you say? 1.2314 0.03296 229 184 37 8
4484 And how long have you had these feelings about "The Range?" 1.2314 0.03466 229 187 31 11
4485 Crazy I'm crazy for feeling so lonely I'm crazy Crazy for feeling so blue 1.2314 0.03178 229 182 41 6
4486 I think we reached the point in your exposure therapy where you finally can touch a horse. 1.2314 0.03296 229 184 37 8
4487 When it is out of tune so are you 1.2314 0.03182 242 194 40 8
4488 Slow down, easy - ok, think I got it, 'Mama, just killed a man... 1.2314 0.03127 255 205 41 9
4489 So, you're an old cowhand, from the Rio Grande... 1.2312 0.03776 186 151 27 8
4490 You need a little less Conway Twitty and more Willie Nelson. 1.2312 0.03454 186 147 35 4
4491 She probably up and done gone with your dog and your tractor leaving you all by your lonesome because you're no damn good at songwriting. 1.2312 0.03537 186 148 33 5
4492 I think these blues may be seasonally affected.” 1.2312 0.03467 199 159 34 6
4493 And when did the blues started playing you? 1.2312 0.03467 199 159 34 6
4494 I wonder if it’s time we moved on from getting up this morning 1.2311 0.03528 212 172 31 9
4495 If you can't say it, play it. 1.2311 0.03265 212 168 39 5
4496 For that pain deep down in the your soul, I'm going to prescribe the bongo drums. 1.2311 0.03399 212 170 35 7
4497 You say that you frequently experience feelings of isolation. Would you say that you're "lonesome"? 1.2311 0.03450 225 183 32 10
4498 You'll never feel comfortable at home until we deal with your buffalo fixation. 1.2311 0.03392 225 182 34 9
4499 Please, tell me how your dog left you again. 1.2311 0.03323 238 193 35 10
4500 So this fear of being buried on the lone prairie, was it a gradual thing? 1.2308 0.03490 221 180 31 10
4501 You just have to face it: every western song lyric has already been sung 1.2308 0.03309 221 177 37 7
4502 She wouldn’t allow guitar playing or truck driving, and she tried to make you to become a doctor or lawyer? 1.2308 0.03434 195 155 35 5
4503 Uh huh, so it was your mother who gave you that guitar. 1.2308 0.03431 221 179 33 9
4504 But what if my lil' doggies just won't get along? 1.2308 0.03370 221 178 35 8
4505 When do you first recall lamenting the demise of the chuck wagon? 1.2308 0.03246 221 176 39 6
4506 Doc, my last shrink described my condition as "Johnny One-Note". 1.2308 0.03762 208 172 24 12
4507 Frankly, you’re not the one with the problems here. 1.2308 0.03246 221 176 39 6
4508 When I said, "Next week we'll role play early influence", I was thinking rabbis. 1.2308 0.03658 195 158 29 8
4509 Feeling down about being shunned by your hombres because you play so badly, I can understand. How you can play so badly, I can't. 1.2308 0.03636 208 170 28 10
4510 So, tell me again why you think you’re Jimi Hendrix reincarnated, Tex? 1.2308 0.03506 208 168 32 8
4511 How did you lose your farm Old McDonald? 1.2308 0.03309 221 177 37 7
4512 Sounds pretty lonesome in the saddle. 1.2308 0.03510 195 156 33 6
4513 It’s perfectly healthy for a grown man to croon when he’s upset. 1.2305 0.03276 243 197 36 10
4514 I’m afraid it won’t bring your dog back. 1.2304 0.03284 230 185 37 8
4515 So, first you were a Shaman; then you were an Astronaut. 1.2304 0.03532 217 177 30 10
4516 Please stop calling me Doc Holliday, Jeremy. 1.2304 0.03409 217 175 34 8
4517 Do you know "Free Bird"? 1.2304 0.03346 217 174 36 7
4518 Now let's create a bridge. 1.2304 0.03683 204 167 27 10
4519 How about you just tell me about your mama 1.2304 0.03266 204 161 39 4
4520 So you are saying you want to be a real cowboy's sweetheart... 1.2304 0.03266 204 161 39 4
4521 Having difficultly putting your feelings into words?... Try strumming your pain with your fingers!! 1.2304 0.03481 204 164 33 7
4522 If you'll excuse me for a moment, I jist got a hankerin' for a mess o' beans aroun' the far. 1.2304 0.03549 204 165 31 8
4523 Don’t worry even Jimi Hendrix played lefthanded. But, have you considered consulting an audiologist? 1.2304 0.03632 191 154 30 7
4524 Tell me more about your little dogie. 1.2301 0.03199 226 180 40 6
4525 The melody I recognize as Dylan’s. But which of your other personas wrote the lyrics—Peter, Paul or Mary? 1.2301 0.03199 226 180 40 6
4526 Yes, I like "Happy Trails" too, but let's git along to your repressed feelings about little dogies. 1.2300 0.03449 213 172 33 8
4527 Strum me your pain with your fingers, Sing me your life with your words . 1.2300 0.03182 213 168 41 4
4528 You have what we call Gary Larson syndrome, but with my help you'll come out on the far side alright. 1.2300 0.03385 213 171 35 7
4529 You might want to consider our left-handed guitar playing Manhattan cowboy group. 1.2300 0.03449 213 172 33 8
4530 here's the painful truth: you don't look like a cowboy, you don't sing like a cowboy...but you do smell like a cowboy 1.2300 0.03449 213 172 33 8
4531 "Dammit, Willie, if you want me to keep explaining your feelings, you gotta make me a co-writer." 1.2300 0.03664 200 163 28 9
4532 I hear the problem "It's the singer not the song". 1.2300 0.03226 200 157 40 3
4533 Just so you know, this session is copyrighted" 1.2298 0.03236 235 189 38 8
4534 Your Home on the Range is conflicted with your Old Kentucky Home 1.2298 0.03292 235 190 36 9
4535 Your main squeeze eloped with your pard, your pickup died and the Whiskey River cut you off at 8:30. How does that make you feel? 1.2298 0.03401 235 192 32 11
4536 Well, not everyone can be Willie. 1.2298 0.03401 235 192 32 11
4537 Would you be more comfortable bringing your gun? 1.2297 0.03296 222 178 37 7
4538 I see by your outfit that you are a cowboy and I would appreciate it if you would keep your dirty boots off my clean couch. 1.2297 0.03534 222 182 29 11
4539 So, the mental health problem has finally reached the West, huh? 1.2297 0.03491 209 169 32 8
4540 Well Tex, technically Flatbush is not West Brooklyn. 1.2297 0.03491 209 169 32 8
4541 After you told your dad you wanted to be a rock star, tell me what he said. 1.2297 0.03357 209 167 36 6
4542 Sing the part again where conflicted you rides off into the sunset and leaves Becky behind. 1.2297 0.03357 209 167 36 6
4543 I just really think you should focus on your own role in why the relationship ended. 1.2297 0.03287 209 166 38 5
4544 So, your mama wouldn't let pick guitars or drive them old trucks. How did that make you feel? 1.2296 0.03262 196 154 39 3
4545 Blake, I think you are beating a dead horse...We're done here for today! 1.2296 0.03641 196 159 29 8
4546 How long have you been fretting about 1.2296 0.03568 196 158 31 7
4547 Well, Doc, 'I'm a Lonesome Cowboy' ... 1.2295 0.03263 244 198 36 10
4548 Stop! I told you there would be no bartering for services. 1.2294 0.03328 231 187 35 9
4549 Well Mr. Nelson, the 'Road' obviously represents your childhood. 1.2294 0.03154 231 184 41 6
4550 Have you considered a more upbeat genre? 1.2294 0.03332 218 175 36 7
4551 And how long have you had this feeling of being strummed by a left-handed cowboy? 1.2294 0.03268 218 174 38 6
4552 Your left-handedness speaks volumes. 1.2294 0.03457 218 177 32 9
4553 Someone already wrote Home on the Range. 1.2294 0.03577 218 179 28 11
4554 And because you so frequently use the word “lonesome,” I believe an anti-depressant might help alleviate your aliena—um, “spur” your social life. 1.2294 0.03457 218 177 32 9
4555 Yes, I too was born under a wand'rin' star... 1.2293 0.03325 205 163 37 5
4556 I would say your a little bit country... 1.2293 0.03252 205 162 39 4
4557 Tell me more about the roaming buffalo... 1.2293 0.03252 205 162 39 4
4558 And how did you *feel* when your dog died, your truck broke down, and your wife left you? 1.2293 0.03325 205 163 37 5
4559 Sing the chorus again and I've got your diagnosis. 1.2293 0.03396 205 164 35 6
4560 As a new patient, Mr. Matthews, I've gone along with your little charade, but now it's time to put that pad down and discuss your control issues... 1.2293 0.03601 205 167 29 9
4561 It all started when I got a pickup truck 1.2293 0.03601 205 167 29 9
4562 Yes, Tom Dooley has a nice ring to it. 1.2293 0.03465 205 165 33 7
4563 So you feel like a fumbling Tumble Weed. 1.2292 0.03191 240 193 39 8
4564 The lyrics of the one song you play, Wyatt, suggest a real longing for home. 1.2291 0.03125 227 180 42 5
4565 So you're a lefty ? Is THAT the issue here? 1.2290 0.03370 214 172 35 7
4566 Would you play the refrain again? 1.2290 0.03305 214 171 37 6
4567 Good thing you've come for a tune up. You sound a bit flat. 1.2290 0.03435 214 173 33 8
4568 So you feel your wife is too high-strung? 1.2290 0.03435 214 173 33 8
4569 Yes, we’ve established that you were born under a bad sign. Could we work through some of the later stages now? 1.2289 0.03288 201 159 38 4
4570 Do I hear you saying that the little dogies should realize it’s their misfortune and none of your own? 1.2289 0.03508 201 162 32 7
4571 That's not an anxiety dream. You're just imagining yourself as the Times Square Cowboy. 1.2288 0.03110 236 188 42 6
4572 When did you first suspect the deep state was out to get you? 1.2287 0.03462 223 182 31 10
4573 You are really out of tune 1.2287 0.03520 223 183 29 11
4574 So then why do you feel that you must follow "The Sad, Lonely Trail?" 1.2287 0.03282 223 179 37 7
4575 I suggest you try the Blues for depression. 1.2287 0.03462 223 182 31 10
4576 Surely one of your ex’s lives in New Mexico! 1.2286 0.03541 210 171 30 9
4577 I don’t think I can help you unless I get a turn with the guitar. 1.2286 0.03476 210 170 32 8
4578 I'm sorry to tell you Wayne, you can't Blame it ALL on the Bossa Nova. 1.2284 0.03326 197 156 37 4
4579 Hot damn, that thar be the key we been lookin' for. 1.2284 0.03479 197 158 33 6
4580 Und zo...you gaze at ze moon oontil you lose your zenzes? 1.2284 0.03624 197 160 29 8
4581 Sixteen gamblers or six jolly cowboys to carry your coffin. Are you anxious you might make the "wrong" choice? 1.2284 0.03479 197 158 33 6
4582 And for the lonesomeness I'm going to recommend that you take one of these, twice a day. 1.2283 0.03381 219 177 34 8
4583 And how was your home on the range life? 1.2283 0.02987 219 171 46 2
4584 Most of my patients are trying to get the blues. 1.2283 0.03381 219 177 34 8
4585 Clyde,do you think you might be projecting a bit onto the little dogie? 1.2283 0.03632 184 148 30 6
4586 Hmmm... you are a lone cowboy from the Rio Grande. And, how do you feel about that? 1.2282 0.03585 206 168 29 9
4587 I told you last week I’m not good at name that tune. 1.2282 0.03518 206 167 31 8
4588 Enough Vienna Waltz's. How about a nice John Denver piece? 1.2282 0.03310 206 164 37 5
4589 That's good you were home on the range; now tell me about the cows, and the boys 1.2282 0.03310 206 164 37 5
4590 I can understand ....."where the Deer and the Antelope play but ... never hear a discouraging word" is a bit too much. 1.2281 0.03352 228 185 34 9
4591 Ya, so this Country unt vestern is your happy place. 1.2281 0.03234 228 183 38 7
4592 Being a left handed guitar playing cowpoke is not anything special, so take off your boots before you get on my couch. 1.2281 0.03465 228 187 30 11
4593 Have you tried singing about a truck yet? 1.2280 0.03445 193 154 34 5
4594 I'd like to go back to when you sang 'The coyotes howl...'. Why do you think they do that? 1.2280 0.03672 193 157 28 8
4595 And how would you say that made you feel — right lonesome or terrible catawampous? 1.2280 0.03522 193 155 32 6
4596 I'm just afraid I'll fall off the wagon again 1.2279 0.03484 215 175 31 9
4597 I heard no request for an encore. 1.2278 0.03212 237 191 38 8
4598 Nonetheless, she maintains that your truck is sexy. Please continue. 1.2277 0.03493 202 163 32 7
4599 No, I did not mean to say I will analyze for a song. 1.2277 0.03269 224 180 37 7
4600 How long have you perceived the long trail as lonesome? 1.2277 0.03389 224 182 33 9
4601 Strumming Willie Nelson's "Crazy" over and over again won't improve your view of the world. 1.2277 0.03389 224 182 33 9
4602 Back in the saddle again... 1.2275 0.03260 211 168 38 5
4603 So let me understand this...when you were back home on the range, your hate for Hoofed animals developed as you had to do all the work, while the deers and the antelopes got to play? 1.2275 0.03461 211 171 32 8
4604 Oh, I see you've overcome your infatuation with Susanna. That was so aggrivating. 1.2275 0.03461 211 171 32 8
4605 Sing to me about your mother. 1.2275 0.03526 211 172 30 9
4606 Your PTSD may be based on your home on the range. 1.2275 0.02947 233 183 47 3
4607 I'm not the best judge of country western, but it's music to my ears that you dumped that floozy. 1.2275 0.03412 233 191 31 11
4608 Pondering if your partner left you to live south of the Ponderosa, does not justify supporting the border wall. 1.2275 0.03466 233 192 29 12
4609 This is my magic carpet and we're not going to Nashville! 1.2273 0.03367 220 178 34 8
4610 Let's try that again in a major key. 1.2273 0.03305 220 177 36 7
4611 Try to develop a brooding melancholy, and your career will pick up. 1.2273 0.03678 198 162 27 9
4612 Tell me more about your childhood home on the range. 1.2273 0.03311 198 157 37 4
4613 It sounds like being in the spotlight may be causing you to fret. 1.2273 0.03477 242 201 27 14
4614 How long have you had this cowboy poet writer's block? 1.2271 0.03338 229 186 34 9
4615 Playing left-handed is not a complex per se. 1.2271 0.03435 207 167 33 7
4616 I understand that you are an old cowhand, but do you have to keep playing it over and over? 1.2271 0.03569 207 169 29 9
4617 Let's stay with it. They say this is how Simon and Garfunkle got their start. 1.2271 0.03503 207 168 31 8
4618 When did you first start thinking Reba McEntire is somehow keeping you from getting an Academy of Country Music Award? 1.2271 0.03435 207 167 33 7
4619 Sounds to me like you are out of tune with yourself. How would you feel about trying silent meditation? 1.2269 0.03362 238 195 32 11
4620 If you are so upset that cowboys are being replaced by drones, maybe you should write a song about it. 1.2269 0.03029 238 189 44 5
4621 Mr. Taylor, if you think that cowboy song is going to work you are crazy. 1.2269 0.03144 238 191 40 7
4622 And how am I to interpret "Yippee-Ki-yi-yay, little dogie"? 1.2269 0.03406 216 175 33 8
4623 When did you start obsessing about lonesome prairies? 1.2269 0.03277 216 173 37 6
4624 It's perfectly normal to NOT feel ready for some football 1.2269 0.03591 216 178 27 11
4625 No, "G" is too upbeat for this song. Try using "D". 1.2269 0.03211 216 172 39 5
4626 You deserve to be heard 1.2269 0.03767 216 181 21 14
4627 And how did it make you feel when your father said "NO MORE HOME ON THE RANGE!" 1.2269 0.03277 216 173 37 6
4628 So you had a happy childhood, and life so far, but you want to find some angst so you can write and sing country music? 1.2269 0.03277 216 173 37 6
4629 Folk, Americana, Alt-Country--You're going to have to decide. 1.2268 0.03581 194 157 30 7
4630 You have what we call Westworldophobia.. 1.2267 0.03434 225 184 31 10
4631 I recommend NOT falling in love with a horse. 1.2267 0.03256 225 181 37 7
4632 I can name that tune in three cognitive neuroses. 1.2267 0.03317 225 182 35 8
4633 And howdy feel about that? 1.2267 0.03256 225 181 37 7
4634 OK, OK, but what about your father. 1.2267 0.03317 225 182 35 8
4635 So; just when did your little doggie git along? 1.2266 0.03334 203 162 36 5
4636 I understand you're depressed, but the best way to get to Carnegie Hall requires practice, practice, practice. 1.2266 0.03477 203 164 32 7
4637 Cowboy: "So you charge to listen, and I charge for people to listen." "So what do we do Doc?" 1.2265 0.03176 234 188 39 7
4638 Hey, I can't fence you in... 1.2265 0.03118 234 187 41 6
4639 According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual No. 5, you’re suffering from a narcissistic personality disorder, pard. 1.2265 0.03118 234 187 41 6
4640 So you want me to call you Willie, but you still deny that CBD oil has any side effects? 1.2264 0.03314 212 170 36 6
4641 Gentle weeps are completely normal. 1.2264 0.03381 212 171 34 7
4642 It's bad enough I have to listen to people bitch all day, now I got to listen to your country western bullshit? 1.2263 0.03261 243 198 35 10
4643 You're wrong, Reno, the obsessive singing of western ballads is a condition thoroughly discussed in the latest Manual of Mental Disorders. 1.2263 0.03628 190 154 29 7
4644 And how often do you have feelings that are not called the blues? 1.2262 0.03354 221 179 34 8
4645 How do you feel about the range? 1.2262 0.03292 221 178 36 7
4646 Just free associate the chords 1.2262 0.03354 221 179 34 8
4647 Well it does sound like losing your baby was hard. 1.2262 0.03031 252 202 43 7
4648 Let’s talk country. 1.2261 0.03089 230 183 42 5
4649 And when I say 'full transparency' I don't mean naked cowboy. 1.2261 0.03382 230 188 32 10
4650 Juan, direction is hard to find but it comes from within 1.2260 0.03211 208 165 39 4
4651 Stop, you’re making me cry 1.2260 0.03619 208 171 27 10
4652 Perhaps it’s time to talk about the cattle you rustle from yourself. 1.2260 0.03352 208 167 35 6
4653 And how did it make you feel when she told you she thinks your tractor’s sexy? 1.2260 0.03488 208 169 31 8
4654 Not all of your problems can be solved by writing a song about it. 1.2258 0.03392 217 176 33 8
4655 And how does your guitar feel about your mother? 1.2258 0.03455 217 177 31 9
4656 Why don’t you sing me one about your mother instead. 1.2258 0.03113 248 200 40 8
4657 Sir, your psychological problem is simply playing the wrong notes. 1.2258 0.03392 217 176 33 8
4658 How does Your mama’s failure to not let her baby grow up to be a cowboy make you feel? 1.2258 0.03329 217 175 35 7
4659 So, as I understand it, you gazed at the moon till you lost your senses? 1.2258 0.03516 217 178 29 10
4660 I know it’s very depressing, Willie, now that weed is legal in most states. 1.2258 0.03576 217 179 27 11
4661 Tell me again about your lonesome doggy. 1.2258 0.03576 217 179 27 11
4662 Let’s explore why you keep repeating yippie kai yay. 1.2258 0.03455 217 177 31 9
4663 Robert, I thought we agreed that going by ‘Beto’ was far enough. 1.2257 0.03477 226 186 29 11
4664 How long have you thought this guitar was your mother ? 1.2257 0.03303 226 183 35 8
4665 ‘The stars at night are big and bright...” Then what? 1.2257 0.03303 226 183 35 8
4666 Mindfulness meditation is gaining popularity in the West. 1.2257 0.03243 226 182 37 7
4667 Try an E-minor in the segue. 1.2257 0.03362 226 184 33 9
4668 Nowadays, I'm too happy to write sad country songs. 1.2256 0.03565 195 158 30 7
4669 O.K, so at the end of our last session you were telling me about a recurring dream you had: you were being taunted by deer and buffalo, and you were homeless. That sound about right? 1.2256 0.03413 195 156 34 5
4670 Now can you play a song that will soothe my anxiety? 1.2255 0.03332 235 192 33 10
4671 Some Eastern thought might change your tune. 1.2255 0.03462 204 165 32 7
4672 This is the tune I composed when my wife left me. 1.2254 0.03232 213 170 38 5
4673 So you say you can't stop fiddling with your pistol... 1.2254 0.03559 213 175 28 10
4674 I think we've gone as far as we can with music therapy. It's time to give up neigh-saying and get back in the saddle again. 1.2254 0.03432 213 173 32 8
4675 Andy, please, let's work on this block again. It's "Guantanamera," not "One ton of mierda!!!!!" 1.2252 0.03460 222 182 30 10
4676 And when did you know you really wanted a gun?? 1.2252 0.03279 222 179 36 7
4677 Have you given any thought to switching to playing the drums? 1.2252 0.03340 222 180 34 8
4678 OK,I get it about Ol' Red,but now let's talk about your mother. 1.2252 0.03401 222 181 32 9
4679 Really? "miss my beers, and your brassieres" 1.2252 0.03460 222 182 30 10
4680 How do you feel about "The Streets of Loredo"? 1.2251 0.03292 191 151 37 3
4681 Please! If you don’t stop singing these sad-ass songs I’m going to have to charge you double. 1.2251 0.03424 231 190 30 11
4682 And how did being in a posse make you feel? 1.2251 0.02952 231 182 46 3
4683 Men always have a hard time expressing themselves... 1.2251 0.02952 231 182 46 3
4684 When did you first become convinced that you were a member of ZZ Top? 1.2251 0.03312 231 188 34 9
4685 My colleagues concur that every good boy does not do fine. 1.2250 0.03120 240 193 40 7
4686 When your dog done died, how did they make you feel? 1.2250 0.03176 240 194 38 8
4687 'Take Me Home, Country Roads' is a psychological crutch, Hank! 1.2250 0.03282 200 159 37 4
4688 Do you know anything besides lonesome cowboy? 1.2250 0.03432 200 161 33 6
4689 And how do you “feel” down on the range? 1.2249 0.03049 249 200 42 7
4690 Yes, yes, the home where the buffalo roam, but can you say more about how your 3rd story walk-up makes you feel? 1.2249 0.03406 209 169 33 7
4691 Number one: you’ re playing the guitar left-handed. Two: get your boots off My couch. Three: you’re a sad excuse for a white guy. Now play! 1.2249 0.03603 209 172 27 10
4692 Tell me more about a home where the buffalo roam.... 1.2249 0.03338 209 168 35 6
4693 That's my rate for psychoanalysis. A neck re-set is a flat $200. 1.2249 0.03538 209 171 29 9
4694 Let's work on refrain. 1.2248 0.03440 218 178 31 9
4695 It is seems that you are fixated on someone with blue eyes crying in the rain. 1.2248 0.03378 218 177 33 8
4696 Ok Doc what do I do about “All The Girls I’ve Loved Before?” They’ve “Traveled In and Out My Door”! 1.2248 0.03049 218 172 43 3
4697 Sing me about your childhood. 1.2248 0.03315 218 176 35 7
4698 Before you discuss your mother lets establish that your music sucks. 1.2248 0.03251 218 175 37 6
4699 No,I don't accept a ballad as payment 1.2248 0.03185 218 174 39 5
4700 So George, your Mama wanted you to grow up to be a doctor or lawyer, how did that make you feel? 1.2247 0.03464 227 187 29 11
4701 So, the pick’n is’t grin’n anymore? 1.2247 0.03290 227 184 35 8
4702 And now, play me a tune about your earliest remembrances of your mother. 1.2247 0.03290 227 184 35 8
4703 You say you can't write a good country song because your father never owned a pickup truck. Let's examine that... 1.2247 0.03231 227 183 37 7
4704 Of course I'm interested in hearing another hurtin' song about your horse. 1.2247 0.03349 227 185 33 9
4705 Where seldom is heard, a discouraging word. 1.2246 0.03498 187 150 32 5
4706 How long have you been playing this way 1.2246 0.03209 236 191 37 8
4707 I can't seem to strike the right chord. 1.2245 0.03474 196 158 32 6
4708 Interesting that all of your songs seem so be about your mother. 1.2243 0.03417 214 174 32 8
4709 ‘’What does a cowboy want?’’ 1.2243 0.03481 214 175 30 9
4710 You dream of having a small gun and firing involuntarily, carry on 1.2243 0.03543 214 176 28 10
4711 What makes you want to wear a turban instead of your 12 gallon hat? 1.2243 0.03417 214 174 32 8
4712 What rhymes with Freud, Slim? 1.2243 0.03219 214 171 38 5
4713 I would suggest that buried deep within your subconscious, there are primal, animalistic urges in direct conflict with the ‘Good Guy’ archetype. 1.2242 0.03387 223 182 32 9
4714 You have a clear case of sado-mariachi disorder. 1.2242 0.03139 223 178 40 5
4715 Do you know the Vienna Waltz? 1.2242 0.03504 223 184 28 11
4716 Hey, if it helps with your stuttering... 1.2242 0.03139 223 178 40 5
4717 Yes, it's your sad song, but I deserve a co-writer credit. 1.2241 0.03411 232 191 30 11
4718 You really miss the "Sons of the Pioneers" don't you? 1.2241 0.03053 241 193 42 6
4719 Play the one about the pony that abandoned you. 1.2241 0.03218 241 196 36 9
4720 Play me the one about you and your Mom again, Ernie. 1.2240 0.03439 192 154 33 5
4721 “After that disturbing little ditty, your prescription for psychiatric medicine goes a little something like this...” 1.2240 0.03439 192 154 33 5
4722 We’ll never make any progress with your mood disorder if you keep singing the same old lonesome cowboy songs. 1.2239 0.03268 201 160 37 4
4723 Sing me your blues! 1.2238 0.03254 210 168 37 5
4724 That's music to my ears. 1.2238 0.03183 210 167 39 4
4725 And on the farm he had a divorce - ee-ii-ee-ii-oh 1.2238 0.03587 210 173 27 10
4726 Whoopee ti yi OCD. 1.2238 0.03587 210 173 27 10
4727 I think we've established that you're a lonesome cowboy. I'm going to prescribe an anti-depressant, but next week we need to sing about any dreams you've been having. 1.2237 0.03364 219 178 33 8
4728 That's the key of F minor, which is a clear indication of an Oedipus complex. 1.2237 0.03364 219 178 33 8
4729 Your guitar needs tuning. 1.2237 0.03172 219 175 39 5
4730 That's the craziest song I ever heard! 1.2237 0.03157 228 183 39 6
4731 So, what makes you think that you could just strum your way through life? 1.2237 0.03157 228 183 39 6
4732 I can cure your itchy trigger finger but your strumming technique is beyond help. 1.2237 0.03157 228 183 39 6
4733 Sometimes Bob Seger is just Bob Seger 1.2236 0.03196 237 192 37 8
4734 I know it's disheartening but focus on his throwaway line "And some, I assume, are good people." 1.2236 0.03121 246 199 39 8
4735 I’m not an old cow hand, nor am I from the Rio Grande. 1.2234 0.03458 197 159 32 6
4736 I understand you're a man of constant sorrow. Can you tell me what lead to you're breakdown last week on Foggy Mountain? 1.2234 0.03532 197 160 30 7
4737 So you had issues performing as A minor? 1.2233 0.03500 206 168 30 8
4738 And how long has it been since they rejected you for that role? 1.2233 0.03362 206 166 34 6
4739 How long have you been depressed over being a Lone Cowhand from the Rio Grande? 1.2233 0.03143 206 163 40 3
4740 And how did you feel on that lonesome road? 1.2233 0.03206 215 172 38 5
4741 Ok, how about this; Drunk agin, sittin’ in my ol’ pickup, Waitin’ fer anuther chance to see that red haired gaaaaal. 1.2233 0.03403 215 175 32 8
4742 Tell me Mr. Gluck, Who recommended me to you? 1.2233 0.03403 215 175 32 8
4743 If you love it you would put a string on it. 1.2232 0.03432 224 184 30 10
4744 (Singing Together): ... “it’s your misfortune and none of my own..” 1.2232 0.03190 224 180 38 6
4745 The 'Ballad of the Stinkin' Shrink' you say? 1.2232 0.03432 224 184 30 10
4746 I’d say you got the Free-range, Grass-fed, Milk Cow Blues! 1.2232 0.03313 224 182 34 8
4747 I believe the dealin' is indeed done. 1.2231 0.02920 251 200 46 5
4748 Now play "Show me the way to go home." 1.2228 0.03867 193 161 21 11
4749 I don't accept payment in song. 1.2228 0.03401 202 163 33 6
4750 That second line was "...from the Rio Grande...", right ? 1.2228 0.03612 202 166 27 9
4751 At what age did you actually start singing redneck mother? 1.2228 0.03680 202 167 25 10
4752 Have you considered, a little bit of Rock’n’Roll? 1.2228 0.03328 202 162 35 5
4753 Wait. Let me grab the world’s smallest violin. 1.2227 0.03443 211 172 31 8
4754 You were drunk the day your mom got out of prison, and then she was run over by a train?" "This is difficult to believe." 1.2227 0.03377 211 171 33 7
4755 We just need to find a way for you to channel your depression. 1.2227 0.03377 211 171 33 7
4756 Down in the Valley" won't help. 1.2227 0.03377 211 171 33 7
4757 And what happens when you play the song backwards? 1.2227 0.03377 211 171 33 7
4758 To pick up where we left off - something about beer, something about trucks, a key change... 1.2227 0.03159 220 176 39 5
4759 Well Mr. McCartney, when did you think you wanted to be a country singer? 1.2227 0.03472 220 181 29 10
4760 Yeah, Slim, Dick Dale played left handed too. But not Country and Western! 1.2227 0.03351 220 179 33 8
4761 Buck, if you sing "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry" again, I'm going to smash your guitar to bits. 1.2227 0.03472 220 181 29 10
4762 I think it’d be best for both you and me if you stuck to the clarinet. 1.2227 0.03380 229 188 31 10
4763 So, you think you’re a singing cowboy? No problem. We’ll diagnose that as Gene Autry Derangement Syndrome. 1.2227 0.03323 229 187 33 9
4764 Your compulsive playing of the "Stairway To Heaven" introduction has become totally annoying. 1.2227 0.03323 229 187 33 9
4765 I swere, if you start yodelihg, this session will be over. 1.2227 0.03347 238 196 31 11
4766 And what do you think, 'Get Along Little Doggies,' means? 1.2222 0.03347 207 167 34 6
4767 Let's try expressing your problem as a melancholy country western song. 1.2222 0.03465 189 152 32 5
4768 Tell me about your early work. 1.2222 0.03259 216 174 36 6
4769 It seems your inner-self wishes you not to remain an Astronaut 1.2222 0.03330 234 192 32 10
4770 ...and after you hollered “git along little dogie”, did you feel a sense of release? 1.2222 0.03347 207 167 34 6
4771 So, Doc, before we start this week...in your professional opinion, is George Conway right? 1.2222 0.03259 216 174 36 6
4772 Before we got hitched, she vowed to give me a home where the buffalo roam, and where seldom is heard a discouraging word. Guess what promise was hardest to keep Doc?” 1.2222 0.03193 216 173 38 5
4773 Have you considered moving back the range, where never is said a discouraging word? 1.2222 0.03050 225 179 42 4
4774 Tell me more about E Minor. 1.2222 0.03659 198 163 26 9
4775 Dylan went electric in 1965. 1.2222 0.03347 207 167 34 6
4776 How would you like to switch to banjo for today's session ? 1.2222 0.02981 234 186 44 4
4777 I hear what you're saying, but there's not much call for 'old cow hands' these days. 1.2222 0.02917 225 177 46 2
4778 Yes, tell me more about your mother and... Reno. 1.2217 0.03193 230 186 37 7
4779 My advice: Stop singing "Sound of Silence" when you want to get out of your funk. 1.2217 0.03310 230 188 33 9
4780 I fret that you may be over fretting. 1.2217 0.03275 221 179 35 7
4781 I think I understand why people have always told you that you are overly picky. 1.2217 0.03275 221 179 35 7
4782 Every instrument has a latency period. 1.2217 0.03146 221 177 39 5
4783 We can take that up in group... 1.2217 0.03211 221 178 37 6
4784 How does your wife feel about this new persona? 1.2217 0.03275 221 179 35 7
4785 I only turned my chair around because I think you need serious help... 1.2217 0.03211 221 178 37 6
4786 I told your mother that she shouldn’t let her babies grow up to be cowboys 1.2217 0.03428 212 173 31 8
4787 Certainly, your repeated playing of The Great Pretender reveals your unconscious aggression toward therapy. 1.2217 0.03386 203 164 33 6
4788 The melody is Woody Guthrie’s. But which of your other personas wrote the lyrics—Liberace, Shirley Temple or Tiny Tim? 1.2217 0.03458 203 165 31 7
4789 If you can’t say it just play it 1.2216 0.03407 194 156 33 5
4790 So, how does strummin’ that thar gittar make you feel, podner? 1.2216 0.03407 194 156 33 5
4791 Might this feeling our progress has leveled off suggest you're ready to try moving on to a cappella? 1.2213 0.03148 235 190 38 7
4792 Tell me again about how your mother made a mess of your home on the range. 1.2213 0.02970 235 187 44 4
4793 OK. Now could you try "Home on the Range"? 1.2213 0.03148 235 190 38 7
4794 Tell me about your father's guitar. 1.2213 0.03261 235 192 34 9
4795 Doc, I just don't know when to hold 'em, or when to fold 'em." By Lori Feldman, Coral Springs, F 1.2213 0.03148 235 190 38 7
4796 Cowboy Complex. 1.2212 0.03287 226 184 34 8
4797 Could you say that again with a little less twang? 1.2212 0.03102 226 181 40 5
4798 Have you tried expressing your problems with an electric guitar? 1.2212 0.03165 226 182 38 6
4799 There are no snakes in your boot, Billy. It's only your imagination. 1.2212 0.03462 226 187 28 11
4800 It's not a plagiarism, if it's a medical record 1.2212 0.03246 217 175 36 6
4801 Yes, so how did it feel to be poleaxed by that dadgummed Wells Fargo, yet again? 1.2212 0.03499 217 179 28 10
4802 Was that in "G" for gloom or "D" for doom? 1.2212 0.03112 217 173 40 4
4803 Doc, I'm a bit off key, wouldn't you agree? 1.2212 0.03262 208 167 36 5
4804 Tell me again how you felt about the lonesome prairie? 1.2212 0.03333 208 168 34 6
4805 And how did you feel about that long, dusty trail? 1.2212 0.03262 208 167 36 5
4806 So the new version of A Star is Born was your idea? 1.2211 0.03500 199 162 30 7
4807 My recommendation: Get a long, little doggie. 1.2211 0.03500 199 162 30 7
4808 If it had not been for 'Cotton-Eyed Joe,' you would have been married a long time ago? 1.2211 0.03607 190 155 28 7
4809 Have you tried a sexy young protégé who will outshine you in your decline? 1.2211 0.03529 190 154 30 6
4810 *strums* “I call this, “Anhedonia Blues.” 1.2208 0.03297 231 189 33 9
4811 Hm: So in that dream you fantisized you were Jimi Hendrix 1.2208 0.03297 231 189 33 9
4812 So, you feel that impending deportation of your Mariachi group marks the end of a musical genre? 1.2207 0.03323 222 181 33 8
4813 Does 'mountain mama' make you feel angry, Jon? 1.2207 0.03384 222 182 31 9
4814 So. It's the not lone prairie you're missing. It's that you have no horse and no school marm. 1.2207 0.03213 213 171 37 5
4815 And what did you do after you woke to find you were la cucaracha? 1.2206 0.03580 204 168 27 9
4816 So.... Tell me about your mother.... 1.2206 0.03647 204 169 25 10
4817 I can assure you that everything you say here is held in strictest confidence Mr. McCartney...., er I mean Tex. 1.2205 0.03392 195 157 33 5
4818 Do you think you're Crazy? 1.2204 0.03171 245 200 36 9
4819 Is it possible that you were not born with a “geetar” in you hand? 1.2203 0.03304 236 194 32 10
4820 No, I haven't seen Westworld. You should try Suits. 1.2203 0.03274 227 185 34 8
4821 And what of your mama had not let you grow up to be a cowboy? 1.2203 0.03214 227 184 36 7
4822 It appears that you are the one gently weeping.... 1.2202 0.03544 218 181 26 11
4823 Describe what this “sha-la-la-la-low” means to you... 1.2202 0.03297 218 177 34 7
4824 I wonder, are schizoid and Freud appropriate rhyming lyrics for a Country & Western song? 1.2201 0.03319 209 169 34 6
4825 I’d like to revisit the chorus 1.2201 0.03104 209 166 40 3
4826 yeah, my wife still loves me, and the tuck's runnin' fine 1.2201 0.03454 209 171 30 8
4827 No matter how you dress it up, I've heard that sad song many times before. 1.2201 0.03249 209 168 36 5
4828 I said ‘rift’ . 1.2201 0.03387 209 170 32 7
4829 ...and your relationship with your Mother? Set to Home on the Range, of course. 1.2201 0.03387 209 170 32 7
4830 This hallucination that you are being buried on the lone prairie by deer and antelope saying discouraging words under cloudy skies--how long has it been going on? 1.2200 0.03261 200 160 36 4
4831 Another song about your father? 1.2200 0.03337 200 161 34 5
4832 So, did you write a song about trucks, alcohol, or women this week? 1.2199 0.03512 191 155 30 6
4833 You have a song about your mother? 1.2198 0.03226 232 189 35 8
4834 How can I help you say goodbye? 1.2198 0.03109 232 187 39 6
4835 I analyzed Gene Autry, and you're no Gene Autry! 1.2197 0.03370 223 183 31 9
4836 But whose blues are they, really? 1.2197 0.03248 223 181 35 7
4837 And how long have you been having these feelings of abandonment? 1.2196 0.03200 214 172 37 5
4838 And just how do you think an ornery cowpoke singin' "Whoaaa, Nellie, My Barns On Fire" makes her feel? 1.2196 0.03334 214 174 33 7
4839 My last two patients said they have relationship issues. I'll send you the details you send me the demo. 1.2195 0.03564 205 169 27 9
4840 So, you're an old cow hand, from the Rio Grande. You do know we are in actually in New York, right? 1.2195 0.03427 205 167 31 7
4841 So when you sing "my achy breaky heart," you're really talking about your father. 1.2195 0.03357 205 166 33 6
4842 Ever thought of playing that in a major key? 1.2195 0.03357 205 166 33 6
4843 I keep telling you that I am not a secret agent for 'America's Got Talent' . 1.2194 0.03237 237 194 34 9
4844 In light of her infidelity, I would propose the novelity of writing about her 'cheating heart.' 1.2194 0.03601 196 161 27 8
4845 I see that she’s a ‘good-hearted woman’, but why does she call you ‘Lefty?’ 1.2194 0.03376 196 158 33 5
4846 I'm sorry, but if you think you can "sing the blues," I think you may need a lot more therapy. 1.2194 0.03376 196 158 33 5
4847 Good morning, America. How are you? 1.2193 0.03140 228 184 38 6
4848 No worries. I'm sure I can get playing lefty as a covered condition under your plan. 1.2193 0.03078 228 183 40 5
4849 Did your dog die, did your wife leave you, do you love your pick-up? If so, you are normal, no need to make another appointment. 1.2193 0.03792 187 155 23 9
4850 So, you're saying you're saying there's only two kinds of music in this world: Country and Western. 1.2192 0.03284 219 178 34 7
4851 So tell me Lefty, can you forgive your horse for running off with Poncho? 1.2192 0.03219 219 177 36 6
4852 So....Happy Trails To You isn’t solving your problems much.... 1.2191 0.03671 178 145 27 6
4853 Yes, you CAN be an opera singer—and no, there's not an operation for that. 1.2190 0.03505 210 173 28 9
4854 I just can't stop feeling the blues." 1.2190 0.03440 210 172 30 8
4855 So, when did you first start seeing these imaginary Deer and Antelope. 1.2189 0.03609 201 166 26 9
4856 Still got the blues, huh. 1.2189 0.03271 233 191 33 9
4857 On that note, let's talk a bit about your childhood. 1.2189 0.03156 233 189 37 7
4858 I wanted to be a cowboy but my momma wouldn't let me. 1.2188 0.03296 224 183 33 8
4859 Look partner, this is talk therapy not sing therapy. 1.2188 0.03357 224 184 31 9
4860 I said I like “cigars”, not “guitars.” 1.2188 0.03109 224 180 39 5
4861 I'd lose the part about the butterflies. 1.2188 0.03648 192 158 26 8
4862 Play it again, Yosemite Sam." 1.2188 0.03296 224 183 33 8
4863 So your first memory is your mother urging you to grow up to be a cowboy. Hmmm. 1.2188 0.03573 192 157 28 7
4864 I feel like the blues today doc. 1.2188 0.03474 224 186 27 11
4865 And how does singing dirty lyrics make you feel? 1.2188 0.03296 224 183 33 8
4866 My horse left me! 1.2188 0.03235 224 182 35 7
4867 I am not sure this will help you get back in tune with life. 1.2188 0.03109 224 180 39 5
4868 Are you aware all your songs have jangling spurs in them? 1.2188 0.03357 224 184 31 9
4869 Tell me more about these American Idol auditions. 1.2186 0.03254 215 174 35 6
4870 Can we talk about your childhood? What was growing up like at home on the range? 1.2186 0.03254 215 174 35 6
4871 And when did your stepfather mosey on over? 1.2186 0.03385 215 176 31 8
4872 Is your Unconscious singing or your Ego? 1.2186 0.03118 215 172 39 4
4873 Does your dog bite? 1.2186 0.03767 183 151 24 8
4874 And if she hadn't stomped your heart, what? 1.2185 0.03055 238 192 40 6
4875 There is of course a wide range of diagnoses but I need to check with the antelope first. 1.2185 0.03055 238 192 40 6
4876 How would you describe this "home on the range?" 1.2184 0.03270 206 166 35 5
4877 You are definitely crazy, but the guitar may keep you from going insane 1.2184 0.03342 206 167 33 6
4878 Tell me how you feel holding its neck and plucking at its vitals while you're singing about your momma. 1.2184 0.03412 206 168 31 7
4879 Just play the guitar. It won't fix your problem. It will drown you out so that I don't have to hear about it. I hate this job. Everyone wants to tell me about their problems. 1.2184 0.03342 206 167 33 6
4880 When we got down from Brokeback Mountain, I told him 'You complete me,' and he just rode off into the sunset. 1.2184 0.03342 206 167 33 6
4881 Playing left-handed has been a real handicap for you. 1.2184 0.03481 206 169 29 8
4882 Promise not to sing, and I'll shrink you to a six-gallon hat. 1.2184 0.03632 174 141 28 5
4883 Where seldom is heard, an encouraging word 1.2183 0.03364 229 189 30 10
4884 You've got to suffer to sing the Blues 1.2183 0.03248 229 187 34 8
4885 And old Susanna was crying for you because of the guitar on your knee? 1.2183 0.03361 197 159 33 5
4886 It sounds like most of your stress is coming from, as you say, that "lily-livered long-eared galoot" that you work with. 1.2182 0.03270 220 179 34 7
4887 This isn’t the West Texas town of El Paso, OK? 1.2182 0.03206 220 178 36 6
4888 Our last session included a little ditty about Jack and Diane. How does that make you feel? 1.2182 0.03074 220 176 40 4
4889 Why don’t you try dressing all in black that seems to work? 1.2181 0.03285 243 201 31 11
4890 This will go much faster if you speak instead of sing about your issues. 1.2181 0.03232 243 200 33 10
4891 Don't fret, Tex, lots of people have trouble with the F chord. 1.2180 0.03078 211 168 40 3
4892 I have to agree with Katy and Lionel. It's pitchy. 1.2180 0.03221 211 170 36 5
4893 I thought Willie Nelson said you shouldn’t. 1.2180 0.03221 211 170 36 5
4894 I noticed you played that song in minor... 1.2180 0.03290 211 171 34 6
4895 It sounds to me like you're a bit out of tune. 1.2179 0.03314 234 193 31 10
4896 So how long have you disappointed your parents? 1.2179 0.03314 234 193 31 10
4897 So your not a cowboy and you can't play a guitar. 1.2178 0.03453 202 165 30 7
4898 Classic guitar does not go with your lifestyle. 1.2178 0.03155 202 161 38 3
4899 How does it feel To be on your own... 1.2178 0.03453 202 165 30 7
4900 Your little dogie grew up and moved away? 1.2178 0.03661 202 168 24 10
4901 How about we swap seats? 1.2178 0.03381 202 164 32 6
4902 Can we talk more about what you mean by "Outlaw State of Mind" 1.2178 0.03460 225 187 27 11
4903 Just to be clear, who was in The Pines? 1.2178 0.03097 225 181 39 5
4904 I think you're more of a farmer on the inside. 1.2178 0.03160 225 182 37 6
4905 Your wife left, but your truck came back - das ist very achy breaky. 1.2178 0.02898 225 178 45 2
4906 if you keep playing no one is going to be climbing the stairway to heaven tonight 1.2178 0.03402 225 186 29 10
4907 Now Wayne, I know you've been singing the blues but you gotta give me something else here. 1.2176 0.03479 193 157 30 6
4908 Playing the guitar left-handed has been proven to cause lots of stress and anxiety. 1.2176 0.03631 193 159 26 8
4909 Can you play the bridge one more time? 1.2176 0.03307 216 176 33 7
4910 Ok, I've finished revising the words for the last verse. Now let's decide on the key and work on the chords. 1.2176 0.03174 216 174 37 5
4911 Tell me about your Bach moment. 1.2176 0.03101 239 194 38 7
4912 What do you mean by "when the doggies retire"?What line of work are they in ? 1.2174 0.03328 207 168 33 6
4913 Mamas should never let their babies grow up to be cowboys. Especially singing ones. 1.2174 0.03328 207 168 33 6
4914 So tell me what it was like growing up on home, home on the range. 1.2174 0.03466 207 170 29 8
4915 Maybe a more cheerful song would've gotten Blake to turn around on "The Voice." 1.2174 0.03598 207 172 25 10
4916 I wouldn't fret about it so much. Todays grammy award is a big joke and completely irrelevant. 1.2174 0.03533 207 171 27 9
4917 Why so defensive? Objectively, your guitar is out of tune. 1.2174 0.03407 230 191 28 11
4918 In the world of psychiatry there is no comfort found where the buffalo roam. 1.2174 0.03235 230 188 34 8
4919 And how do you think that effected you on a minor scale? 1.2174 0.03397 207 169 31 7
4920 Tell me more about this "range" you sing of, and your earliest memories of said "home." 1.2174 0.03184 207 166 37 4
4921 I don't know if I can cure you of The Blues" 1.2174 0.03184 207 166 37 4
4922 So how long after inhaling a Willie Nelson Reserve, did you start growing a beard and playing guitar? 1.2172 0.03319 221 181 32 8
4923 Next time play the bridge more staccato... 1.2172 0.03193 221 179 36 6
4924 Do you feel like a failure because: A. Your guitar's out of tune? B. Your verses don't rhyme? or, C. Your storylines are trite? 1.2172 0.03257 221 180 34 7
4925 Doc I think I have a serious case of the blues. 1.2172 0.03193 221 179 36 6
4926 And then I discovered that as a left-handed guitar player I was out of tune with society. 1.2172 0.03421 198 161 31 6
4927 Please try and tell me again about this good life you had before you became the victim to the cigarettes, the whiskey, and the women who are so wild that you must describe them as wild-wild? 1.2170 0.03344 212 173 32 7
4928 Still strumming along, singing the same old song? 1.2170 0.03410 212 174 30 8
4929 Tell me straight, Clem. What’s with the loony tunes? 1.2170 0.03410 212 174 30 8
4930 I think Bradley, you've gone gaga 1.2169 0.03755 189 157 23 9
4931 NO DEER OR BUFFALO TODAY? 1.2169 0.03072 249 203 38 8
4932 As a stockbroker, I'm wondering if you are struggling with a career identity problem. 1.2168 0.03270 226 185 33 8
4933 So your mama let you grow up to be a cowboy, pick guitars and drive them old trucks? 1.2168 0.03148 226 183 37 6
4934 If the guitar were the cowpoke who hurt you, what song would you want to play on him? 1.2168 0.03209 226 184 35 7
4935 Okay, so one dared to make a slip, the stranger there among them had a big iron on his hip. I think we've found the source of your anxiety issues. 1.2167 0.03293 203 164 34 5
4936 And how long have you been left handed? 1.2167 0.03644 203 169 24 10
4937 Now Gary...you promised me 4 chords and the TRUTH. 1.2166 0.03227 217 176 35 6
4938 And why is it important that the buffaloes roam? 1.2166 0.03420 217 179 29 9
4939 Let me be clear. Guitar-playing is not your natural talent. 1.2166 0.03161 217 175 37 5
4940 Oh give me a loan... 1.2166 0.03293 217 177 33 7
4941 And so you chose “a little bit country” over “a little bit rock n’ roll”? 1.2166 0.03161 217 175 37 5
4942 So let's dissect why 'Mosey Along Little Doggie' is inappropriate for a break-up text. 1.2166 0.03293 217 177 33 7
4943 Just keep pick-in and the the grin-in will happen. 1.2165 0.03385 194 157 32 5
4944 Can you play "I get the blues from that smell on your boots?" 1.2165 0.03337 231 191 30 10
4945 Sing me how you feel about that. 1.2165 0.03281 231 190 32 9
4946 And no matter how hard you try you can't find anything to rhyme with "Twitter shaming"? 1.2165 0.03393 231 192 28 11
4947 You’re a little bit country, I’m a little bit Lexapro. 1.2163 0.03451 208 171 29 8
4948 So you blame your mother that you grew up to be a cowboy. 1.2163 0.03096 208 166 39 3
4949 We’ve been through this time and time again. Leave the lyrics to me. 1.2163 0.03451 208 171 29 8
4950 No, Roy Roger's horse is unrelated to a trigger warning. 1.2163 0.03170 208 167 37 4
4951 You feel betrayed. Turns out, it wasn’t so fun at the YMCA. 1.2162 0.03367 222 183 30 9
4952 When did you first learn that you’re a young cowboy and you know you must die. 1.2162 0.02913 222 176 44 2
4953 Mr. Krinsky, I think we’ve spent enough time on 'Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys.' 1.2162 0.03049 222 178 40 4
4954 Very emotional chord progression ... Can you talk? 1.2162 0.03367 222 183 30 9
4955 Dueling at dawn is just your defense mechanism. 1.2162 0.03485 185 150 30 5
4956 Oaterpus Complex 1.2161 0.03177 236 193 35 8
4957 Sounds like someone has daddy issues. 1.2161 0.02941 236 189 43 4
4958 Don't say waking to the derndest bested coffee and milk this side of Abaline, try; arising to a remarkable latte. 1.2161 0.03406 199 162 31 6
4959 So, tell me how it feels when you "Yippee Ki-O Ki-Ay? 1.2161 0.03406 199 162 31 6
4960 By exhorting the little dogies to get along, you wanted to resolve conflict with your mother? 1.2161 0.03480 199 163 29 7
4961 Do you know “Basket Case” by Green Day? 1.2160 0.03330 213 174 32 7
4962 Tell me about the discouraging words you heard as a kid and why you fled Newark for a home on the range. 1.2160 0.03263 213 173 34 6
4963 So after five years of this, you still prefer gun slinging? 1.2160 0.03396 213 175 30 8
4964 I'd like to hear you sing John Legend's "Sometimes I feel like a motherless child" and "She don't have to know" 1.2160 0.03124 213 171 38 4
4965 You're Willie Nelson? 1.2160 0.03330 213 174 32 7
4966 Yeah, yeah, you've got tears in your ears from lying down and thinking about her ... anything else? 1.2160 0.03330 213 174 32 7
4967 Sidekick? No 1.2160 0.03263 213 173 34 6
4968 If not the lone prairie, where do you really want to be buried? 1.2159 0.03257 227 186 33 8
4969 How about something besides 'Mother and Child Reunion'? 1.2158 0.03737 190 158 23 9
4970 Do you think the little doggies "git along" when you sing to them? 1.2158 0.03506 190 155 29 6
4971 Why do you think you are just an old cow hand from the Rio Grande. 1.2157 0.03423 204 167 30 7
4972 Don't give up. Country and Western may come back. 1.2157 0.03351 204 166 32 6
4973 Well I think we've established that country music is depressing for you. I am ordering some guitar transcriptions of Souza marches and we'll see where that gets us. 1.2157 0.03423 204 167 30 7
4974 Feelings, wo-o-o feelings... 1.2156 0.03343 218 179 31 8
4975 When can I get my hat and guitar back, Dr. Freud? 1.2156 0.03214 218 177 35 6
4976 and when did your mother first tell you "you cant sing.?" 1.2156 0.03343 218 179 31 8
4977 More to the point, how did losing your best gal to a dashing young cowboy out on the west Texas prairie, make you feel? 1.2156 0.03080 218 175 39 4
4978 Do you just need me to write down your lyrics? 1.2156 0.03279 218 178 33 7
4979 I'm having relationship problems with my horse. 1.2156 0.03406 218 180 29 9
4980 I understand you're having issues with your booking agency 1.2156 0.03010 218 174 41 3
4981 What you need is some electric-guitar therapy treatment. 1.2156 0.03406 218 180 29 9
4982 Are you being Strait with me? 1.2155 0.03031 232 187 40 5
4983 Which version of A Star is Born is your favorite, and why. 1.2155 0.03352 181 145 33 3
4984 How does that mis-tuned string make you feel? 1.2154 0.03447 195 159 30 6
4985 Again, with subtlety! 1.2154 0.03523 195 160 28 7
4986 So, when your grannie got run over by a train, how did that make you feel? 1.2153 0.03368 209 171 31 7
4987 ...and how do you sing about that...? 1.2152 0.03231 223 182 34 7
4988 So you're having a problem finding a long lonesome trail. 1.2152 0.02991 237 191 41 5
4989 I don't think you need depression medication because your truck is rusting. 1.2150 0.03606 200 166 25 9
4990 Your strumming is telling me that you want to make some changes in your life 1.2150 0.03316 200 162 33 5
4991 O.K., so let me get this straight.... you were always wondering why Pancho got top billing ? 1.2150 0.03381 214 176 30 8
4992 Why do you think you can't yee another haw? 1.2150 0.03316 214 175 32 7
4993 Butch, you're paying cash next time. No more Johnny Cash. 1.2150 0.03445 214 177 28 9
4994 I had a choice, dead or alive. 1.2150 0.03445 214 177 28 9
4995 Not what I expected when you said strum und drang 1.2150 0.03445 214 177 28 9
4996 ’Whoopie Ti Yi Yo’—Does that refer to Ms. Goldberg? 1.2150 0.03445 214 177 28 9
4997 When I said "share your feelings" I didn't mean your cover of Morris Albert's 'Feelings'. 1.2150 0.03181 214 173 36 5
4998 And then he said, "This town ain't big enough for the both of us." 1.2150 0.03181 214 173 36 5
4999 Yes, Willie,...I've heard that the shape of a guitar is modeled after a woman's torso. You can stop strumming it now. 1.2149 0.03184 228 186 35 7
5000 Would it help if there were lyrics? 1.2149 0.03060 228 184 39 5
5001 Not everyone appreciates John Cage bluegrass. 1.2149 0.03184 228 186 35 7
5002 If you keep playing All Star by Smash Mouth every time I mention your ex-wife, I'm banning the guitar. 1.2149 0.03244 228 187 33 8
5003 Butch Cassidy was a fantasy of mine too...... 1.2149 0.02893 242 194 44 4
5004 Born in Vermont, right? So, how does that make you an "old cowhand from the Rio Grande"? 1.2149 0.02952 242 195 42 5
5005 Your sad life is perfect for country and western music. I'll help you write the lyrics for a cut of the royalties. 1.2146 0.03407 205 168 30 7
5006 Tell me about your Moody Blues. 1.2146 0.03407 205 168 30 7
5007 No, it doesn't have as nice a ring to it as "Lonesome Bill," but I'm diagnosing you as "Social Anxiety Bill." 1.2146 0.03337 205 167 32 6
5008 Now that we have sung “The Yellow Rose of Texas” can we start working on your issues? 1.2146 0.03407 205 168 30 7
5009 Whoopee ti yi yo, git along little dogies..." Now would you say that is a metaphor for your childhood 1.2146 0.03407 205 168 30 7
5010 We’ve been over the lonesome cowboy issues scoring seceral weeks now, what’s new? 1.2146 0.03407 205 168 30 7
5011 Didn't your mother warn you about your current occupation? 1.2146 0.03264 205 166 34 5
5012 I'm sorry I called your ukulele a banjo. 1.2146 0.03407 205 168 30 7
5013 When did you start imagining that the federal government was against you? 1.2146 0.03391 219 181 29 9
5014 So, you're an old cow hand. And where did you say you were from? 1.2146 0.03266 219 179 33 7
5015 On second thought, I should not have named my practice "Sing Me Your Blues" 1.2146 0.03080 233 189 38 6
5016 Tell me again about your Segovia dreams 1.2146 0.03198 233 191 34 8
5017 So your wife ran off with your best friend and you sure do miss him? And how do you feel about that? 1.2146 0.03198 233 191 34 8
5018 Then don't talk, just sing. 1.2146 0.03139 233 190 36 7
5019 Perhaps you could be less lonesome if you joined a cowboy band. 1.2143 0.03070 210 168 39 3
5020 I prefer Mozart. 1.2143 0.03551 210 175 25 10
5021 Just where is this lone prairie to which you wish to be carried? 1.2143 0.03279 224 184 32 8
5022 I know it's politically incorrect but next time I wanna be an Indian. 1.2143 0.03155 224 182 36 6
5023 You have a lot of problems, one of which that is not music to anyone's ears. 1.2143 0.03317 238 198 29 11
5024 It's not working out, Rex. I gotta go back to Muzak. 1.2143 0.03111 196 156 38 2
5025 Okay—drink, women who’ve left you, and lonely nights on the range beside a fire with your cattle lowing. What else? 1.2143 0.03025 224 180 40 4
5026 How long would you say it's been, Bill, since this "buffalo" has been roaming IN your home. 1.2143 0.03421 210 173 29 8
5027 And you say your Doppelgänger holds his guitar the other way? 1.2143 0.03581 196 162 26 8
5028 Where do the deer and antelope play for you these days? 1.2143 0.03279 224 184 32 8
5029 I'm proud to be an Okie from Muskogee! 1.2143 0.03678 210 177 21 12
5030 So you think you've resolved the border wall debacle in terms of the good, the bad AND the ugly? 1.2143 0.03581 196 162 26 8
5031 It is as if we both do this for a living. 1.2140 0.03460 229 192 25 12
5032 What you’re saying is very meaningful, but could you say it again, only this time in tune? 1.2140 0.03098 215 173 38 4
5033 So you still blame your mother for not forcing you into a better profession? 1.2140 0.03302 215 176 32 7
5034 I'm afraid you're plum outta pluck 1.2140 0.03098 215 173 38 4
5035 I’m not right-handed either. 1.2140 0.03302 215 176 32 7
5036 Music does not replace the longing for my horse." 1.2140 0.03235 215 175 34 6
5037 Let's talk more about this "lone prairie." 1.2139 0.03375 201 164 31 6
5038 And when did you first feel the blues? 1.2139 0.03590 201 167 25 9
5039 Would you stop strumming “Even Cowboys Get the Blues” so we can continue our session? 1.2139 0.03452 187 152 30 5
5040 Tell me again why you think your home on the range increases your anxiety. 1.2139 0.03368 187 151 32 4
5041 Actually, I need you to speak! 1.2137 0.03008 234 189 40 5
5042 So what if in your dream, the guitar really was the hat? 1.2137 0.03068 234 190 38 6
5043 Yes, it does sound a little like a Beatle song !!!! 1.2136 0.03252 220 180 33 7
5044 Can't recall your last yippee ki-yay... 1.2136 0.03188 220 179 35 6
5045 We need to get past ‘Git Along, Little Dogies’. 1.2136 0.03250 206 167 34 5
5046 I'm not sure. Bach's concerto may not work in Austin. 1.2135 0.03774 192 161 21 10
5047 Out of curiosity... Is it only when you are playing the guitar that your wife says you're too picky. 1.2134 0.02968 239 193 41 5
5048 Life is more than just a G chord, pard. 1.2133 0.03142 225 183 36 6
5049 I tell ya, Doc, if you get an outfit you can be a cowboy too. 1.2133 0.03201 211 171 35 5
5050 So you feel your guitar made you do it. 1.2133 0.03130 211 170 37 4
5051 What did you mean when you said, “Home, home on the rage?” Your coworkers were very concerned. 1.2133 0.03271 211 172 33 6
5052 Alright Lonny how's this " Mama was tramp never knew my dad I don't need to pay a shrink to tell me why I'm bad" 1.2133 0.03201 211 171 35 5
5053 I'm afraid you may need to refinance your home on the range if we are to continue. 1.2132 0.03339 197 160 32 5
5054 So when did you first discover the power of strumming as sublimation? 1.2130 0.03036 230 186 39 5
5055 Why is it that you think they discriminate against left-handed, cowboy guitarists 1.2130 0.02909 230 184 43 3
5056 Oh, I'm sorry he treated you that way. 1.2130 0.03159 230 188 35 7
5057 As John Elton said, I guess that's why they call it the blues. 1.2130 0.03154 216 175 36 5
5058 I seldom like to discourage you but this is not your home and we have no buffalo. 1.2129 0.03433 202 166 29 7
5059 I lost my mind when I found my home torn down for a wall. 1.2129 0.03504 202 167 27 8
5060 I understand your problem, but I need you to remove the guitar first 1.2129 0.03286 202 164 33 5
5061 How long have you been fixated on that Pink Floyd song? 1.2129 0.03433 202 166 29 7
5062 I hope my words have not discouraged you. 1.2129 0.03210 202 163 35 4
5063 I particularly like that line you sing about dying with your boots on! 1.2129 0.03210 202 163 35 4
5064 I think you may have pick envy. 1.2128 0.03597 188 155 26 7
5065 Do you mind? Your country love song is depressing me. 1.2128 0.03597 188 155 26 7
5066 I know you're "an hombre sincero", but, to help you, I need more information. 1.2128 0.02996 235 190 40 5
5067 What don't you like about Stravinsky? 1.2128 0.03115 235 192 36 7
5068 How long have you felt this way about your pick-up truck, your gun,and your beer! 1.2128 0.02872 235 188 44 3
5069 And then what did the dog say? 1.2127 0.03302 221 182 31 8
5070 Trust me, Elvis you’re not....Also not Bob Dylan. 1.2126 0.03162 207 167 36 4
5071 I'm just saying, there are other trucks on the road. 1.2126 0.03087 207 166 38 3
5072 The difference between you and me, dear brother, is that for you the search is as important as the nugget. 1.2126 0.03378 207 170 30 7
5073 I can see this is going to be one, sad country tale. 1.2124 0.03297 193 156 33 4
5074 I have psychoanalyzed hundreds of patients, Jameson; but, you are the first one who takes his own notes. 1.2124 0.03610 193 160 25 8
5075 I've always loved that song, "Dissociative Identity." 1.2124 0.03130 226 184 36 6
5076 Oh, so you have stage fright, not stagecoach fright. 1.2124 0.03066 226 183 38 5
5077 Please, put the guitar down. You don't need to hide behind it here. 1.2124 0.03253 226 186 32 8
5078 You say you don't have a home where the buffalo roam. Tell me how you feel about that. 1.2124 0.03253 226 186 32 8
5079 So your guitar's been feeling sad and lonely for a long time... 1.2123 0.03117 212 171 37 4
5080 Now,what was it about the banjo player? 1.2123 0.03044 212 170 39 3
5081 Soooo, as I understand it, you are in favor of our sessions, but afraid you will lose your edge for songwriting since recording your last hit, "Come down sweet Jesus and kick me through the goal posts of life"? 1.2123 0.03584 212 178 23 11
5082 Just because you go by Red doesn’t mean you can’t play the blues. 1.2123 0.03044 212 170 39 3
5083 Your 'Georgia On My Mind' wasn't bad, but the 'Free Bird' shows your'e making some progress. 1.2123 0.03187 212 172 35 5
5084 Hour's up. But any more problems you can share are on the house. 1.2122 0.02862 245 197 44 4
5085 Do you have any creative outlets to express your feelings? 1.2121 0.03400 198 162 30 6
5086 Do you think your mother would agree that a guitar is just a guitar? 1.2121 0.03475 198 163 28 7
5087 (Exasperated) That’s not how it goes! 1.2121 0.03246 198 160 34 4
5088 And why do you want to cut out his gizzard? 1.2120 0.03141 217 176 36 5
5089 It sounds like the only thing you can’t wrangle is your relationship with your father. 1.2120 0.03562 184 151 27 6
5090 Let’s begin by trying to focus on whether or not hippity-hop is the proper genre for you. 1.2119 0.03217 236 195 32 9
5091 ...and, why would you rather fiddle? 1.2118 0.03345 203 166 31 6
5092 I get it. You're all strung out. No words necessary. 1.2118 0.03417 203 167 29 7
5093 Go electric next week. You need to bring it all back home. 1.2118 0.03272 203 165 33 5
5094 My secretary should be back with your bourbon any minute. 1.2118 0.03417 203 167 29 7
5095 I thought you concluded your Cary Grant personna suited you better. 1.2117 0.02962 222 178 41 3
5096 Home, home on the range... where the deer and the antelope play... my mother abandoned me and I use humor to mask my insecurities... and the skies are not cloudy all day... 1.2117 0.03162 222 181 35 6
5097 Mental issues I can help you with all day long. Making 'Blue Grass' as popular as Rap, however, is a subject best addressed to God or Satan. 1.2117 0.03288 222 183 31 8
5098 Tell me more about your transformation - more literal than spiritual, you say? 1.2117 0.03162 222 181 35 6
5099 Please try to tell your story without the guitar solo. 1.2117 0.03226 222 182 33 7
5100 Sorry, can you repeat that last line about making your mother proud? 1.2117 0.03162 222 181 35 6
5101 Do you ever recall having any friends? 1.2117 0.03030 222 179 39 4
5102 And no matter how many ways you pronounce "girl" and "world", you still can't get them to rhyme? 1.2117 0.03097 222 180 37 5
5103 You're giving me the Willies! 1.2117 0.03469 222 186 25 11
5104 To begin sing me the verses with the tenor and range of your discord 1.2117 0.03350 222 184 29 9
5105 What were you feeling when your mother called you a goddamned loser? 1.2116 0.03332 241 202 27 12
5106 D'you mind if I give her a try if she's so done with you? 1.2115 0.03431 208 172 28 8
5107 Still singing about your saddle horn? 1.2115 0.03293 208 170 32 6
5108 You do know that music notation is not my speciality don't you? 1.2115 0.03431 208 172 28 8
5109 Sorry, I missed that note ... 1.2115 0.03363 208 171 30 7
5110 Play it again Sam 1.2115 0.03564 208 174 24 10
5111 Home, home on the couch . . . 1.2115 0.03498 208 173 26 9
5112 So in this Taylor Swift dream, you DID show your bellybutton? 1.2115 0.03240 227 187 32 8
5113 And how does being 'home, home on the range' make you feel? 1.2114 0.03021 246 201 38 7
5114 You sound a bit melancholy today. 1.2113 0.03282 194 157 33 4
5115 If you play “Crazy” just on more time... 1.2113 0.03363 194 158 31 5
5116 So exactly when did you begin to feel that your Music no longer reflected your Life? 1.2113 0.03174 213 173 35 5
5117 So you're left handed. Lots of people are. Get over it. And is that song supposed to be recognizable? 1.2113 0.03243 213 174 33 6
5118 My girl friend left me, my truck broke down, and my dog died. 1.2112 0.03074 232 189 37 6
5119 You understand you can sing how much you love your pigs , but it’s ok if they don’t see it that way 1.2111 0.03309 199 162 32 5
5120 Don't string me along! 1.2111 0.03459 199 164 28 7
5121 what’s this about mama, pick-up truck, prison, dog, & girlfriend? 1.2111 0.03385 199 163 30 6
5122 I thought depression was your way of living. Are you sure you want to change? 1.2110 0.03261 218 179 32 7
5123 You can just tell me how you feel. You don't need to sing it to me. 1.2110 0.03261 218 179 32 7
5124 How does this sound? "Way out west, they have a name for rain and wind and fire...the rain is Tess, the fire's Joe, and they call the wind...Trump." 1.2110 0.03629 218 185 20 13
5125 I get the part about commitment issues, but what exactly is a 'cayuse'? 1.2110 0.02919 218 174 42 2
5126 Seems clear that you have guitar separation anxiety. 1.2110 0.03195 218 178 34 6
5127 You need to face the facts -- those lyrics don't work. 1.2110 0.03195 218 178 34 6
5128 no. the doctor will not harmonize to let your free spirit loose. 1.2110 0.03450 218 182 26 10
5129 Well, maybe if you took the medication, as prescribed, you wouldn’t feel so blue in the mornings. 1.2110 0.03128 218 177 36 5
5130 Tell me about your mother lode. 1.2110 0.03033 237 193 38 6
5131 Okay, so why do you think you stopped dreaming about the banjo on your knee?" 1.2110 0.03149 237 195 34 8
5132 She said MySpace was the ONLY place she had it saved? 1.2108 0.03545 185 152 27 6
5133 Let me write this down, "I am your sunshine, your only sunshine..." 1.2108 0.03545 185 152 27 6
5134 ......and then my dog died. 1.2108 0.03627 185 153 25 7
5135 'Don't Fence Me In' won't help with parking in Manhattan. 1.2108 0.03402 204 168 29 7
5136 Well, I'm sorry that your rabbit died, and that's a really nice song that you wrote about it, but that was 27 years ago, so don't you think that it's about time that you got a new pet and got on with your life? 1.2108 0.03257 204 166 33 5
5137 And when the truck broke down that twelfth time, how did that make you feel? 1.2108 0.03402 204 168 29 7
5138 You keep playing the same old tired tune Dan 1.2108 0.03402 204 168 29 7
5139 But is it really that the whiskey isn't working any longer or is that more of a defense mechanism? 1.2108 0.03084 223 181 37 5
5140 Maybe your guitar is trying to tell you that it wants some space. 1.2108 0.03149 223 182 35 6
5141 Perhaps you could try switching genres? 1.2108 0.03018 223 180 39 4
5142 I know why you left the science world, but are you qualified for this? 1.2108 0.03275 223 184 31 8
5143 Relax. There's no need to feel guilty about also wearing a G string. 1.2108 0.03275 223 184 31 8
5144 I know I said you could make yourself comfortable but I'd prefer it if you didn't have to sing the responses to all of my questions. 1.2107 0.02935 242 196 41 5
5145 Ain't mishavin' "? "Can't get no satisfaction"? OK. What else 1.2105 0.03416 209 173 28 8
5146 Ok, I hear you: 'Ooohhhh...all my Ex's Live in Texas'! 1.2105 0.03105 228 186 36 6
5147 I don't care how soothing you think it is, if you play 'Home on the Range' one more time, I'm going to get angry. 1.2105 0.03484 190 156 28 6
5148 Perhaps you should consider the lute? 1.2105 0.03170 247 205 32 10
5149 I don't need no stinkin' diploma. 1.2105 0.03416 209 173 28 8
5150 It's just a thought, but have you ever considered playing with your right hand, instead? 1.2103 0.02972 252 206 39 7
5151 Rules are rules. American Idol has an age limitation. 1.2103 0.03295 233 194 29 10
5152 Let your guitar do the talking 1.2103 0.03161 214 174 35 5
5153 I'm not sure this is what they meant when they said to put it on the record... 1.2103 0.03161 214 174 35 5
5154 This time in the key of G tells me how your troubles started. 1.2101 0.03080 238 195 36 7
5155 Mama, I’m sorry I still wanna be a cowboy. I’m learning the guitar and I leased a pick up truck. Bein’ a Wall St lawyer just isn’t enough. 1.2100 0.03115 219 178 36 5
5156 So, you live in Yokohama and your wife thinks you've lost yourself in Japanese culture. 1.2100 0.03369 200 164 30 6
5157 So, after you saw “Cats “, what were the big questions that started coming up? 1.2100 0.03369 200 164 30 6
5158 but how did that lonely road make you feel?" -Daniel Stein, New York, N 1.2098 0.02939 224 180 41 3
5159 Next week I'll bring my banjo for full effect. 1.2098 0.03006 224 181 39 4
5160 It's common for many a cowboy to feel discouraged once they finish riding into a sunset, but there's always another sunset tomorrow. 1.2098 0.03322 224 186 29 9
5161 B flat would be more soothing. 1.2098 0.03457 205 170 27 8
5162 First, this is textbook sexual transference. And more importantly, no. I will not sing "Shallow (A Star is born)" with you. 1.2098 0.03316 205 168 31 6
5163 So continue. You were saying, 'by the time you got to Phoenix she was rising and then she read the note you left hanging from her door.....' 1.2098 0.03316 205 168 31 6
5164 Sing me that one about your mother 1.2097 0.03528 186 153 27 6
5165 What does a roaming buffalo signify for you? 1.2096 0.03331 229 191 28 10
5166 Yippee Ki Yay just works against why you're here today, remember? 1.2096 0.03154 229 188 34 7
5167 Actually, I said 'singing.' And your first association to 'swinging' is a noose? 1.2096 0.03273 229 190 30 9
5168 You will be happier if you just go to Rancho Grande. 1.2095 0.02973 210 168 40 2
5169 And you say your father was an old cowhand too? 1.2095 0.03194 210 171 34 5
5170 I know you’re frustrated but studies show that guitar on the lap is far preferable to banjo on the knee. 1.2095 0.03334 210 173 30 7
5171 Yeah, it’s a great song, but the song’s not your problem, senior. 1.2095 0.03194 210 171 34 5
5172 I can name that tune in four notes. 1.2095 0.03122 210 170 36 4
5173 No, I can't explain how the Old West was won. 1.2095 0.03194 210 171 34 5
5174 Not every cowboy has to sing a sad, sad song 1.2095 0.03265 210 172 32 6
5175 Would you mind waiting here while I go grab a tambourine? 1.2094 0.03467 191 157 28 6
5176 Not to be critical of your dream of becoming Country music's Hendrix but you might try playing that thing right handed. 1.2094 0.03051 234 191 37 6
5177 Have you reconsidered the home on the range? 1.2094 0.03110 234 192 35 7
5178 So Tex ...how have you progressed in mingling into your East Side Manhattan Condo. 1.2093 0.03148 215 175 35 5
5179 So Lefty, you're depressed because your band members call you a socialist? 1.2093 0.03216 215 176 33 6
5180 So you say your mother steered you away from the flugelhorn. 1.2092 0.03125 239 197 34 8
5181 How long have you felt like you're from another time and place? 1.2092 0.03409 196 161 29 6
5182 No, I won't conjure up fake childhood memories for your next album. 1.2091 0.03234 220 181 32 7
5183 So you're saying that you have domatophobia but only in areas where the buffalo roam? 1.2091 0.03421 220 184 26 10
5184 We're making progress with the melody, but these lyrics still need work. 1.2091 0.03169 220 180 34 6
5185 Nationwide is on your side 1.2091 0.03297 220 182 30 8
5186 So how do these campfire songs make you feel? 1.2091 0.03234 220 181 32 7
5187 No wonder you feel alone.....your country’s gone blue. 1.2090 0.03027 244 200 37 7
5188 Stuck in the same old song, doc. 1.2090 0.03427 201 166 28 7
5189 Your musical experience of the string theory is ambivalent 1.2090 0.03427 201 166 28 7
5190 When you wear that hat do you think of your mother? 1.2090 0.03202 201 163 34 4
5191 Have you at least managed to cut down on sarsaparilla? 1.2087 0.03079 206 166 37 3
5192 "Let me guess: your wife left you, your dog died..." John Canning Sea Cliff, New Yor 1.2087 0.03301 206 169 31 6
5193 it might be your boots that are too tight 1.2087 0.03372 206 170 29 7
5194 This emotional breakthrough will become a Grammy winner! 1.2087 0.03142 230 189 34 7
5195 Shall we try singing about your feeling instead? 1.2087 0.02955 230 186 40 4
5196 Perhaps if you lighten up your music, you'll find friends. 1.2086 0.03428 187 153 29 5
5197 It sounds to me that you are struggling to set healthy boundaries with the people in your life but that this has left you feeling stronger and better able to express your own needs and desires. 1.2086 0.03428 187 153 29 5
5198 OK, OK. I know you're a cowboy who knows he must die. Now let's talk about your issues with your mother. 1.2086 0.03343 187 152 31 4
5199 Jethro, compulsive bushwhacking is a serious problem. 1.2085 0.03453 211 176 26 9
5200 ♫All My Exes Live in Texas♫,   Doc, and I need help. 1.2085 0.03109 211 171 36 4
5201 Travelin' down the road to exactly where? 1.2085 0.03181 211 172 34 5
5202 Seems to me you're suffering from clinical depression as a result of childhood a-banjo-ment 1.2085 0.03518 211 177 24 10
5203 Sorry but I'm a psychiatrist, not a music critic. 1.2085 0.03319 211 174 30 7
5204 I have something I need to share with you. After a year, I've had it. You have no talent, no stage presence, and stop bringing the guitar. You can't even play it. 1.2085 0.03387 211 175 28 8
5205 Are you sure, "Whooppee-ti-yi-yo, Git along little doggies" is all you have on your mind? 1.2083 0.03605 192 160 24 8
5206 Does your other personality play the blues? 1.2083 0.02994 216 174 39 3
5207 I’m certain your mother would have turned her chair for you. 1.2083 0.03223 240 200 30 10
5208 Yes, yes, we're far from the shallows now, but let's move on. 1.2083 0.02999 240 196 38 6
5209 OK - if you insist you may answer me in song. 1.2083 0.03168 240 199 32 9
5210 Get along little dogie is not an answer. 1.2083 0.02994 216 174 39 3
5211 When did you start rhyming your words? 1.2083 0.03065 216 175 37 4
5212 I'm crazy, crazy for feelin' so lonely. 1.2082 0.02903 245 199 41 5
5213 And what did you think he meant by 'sour note'? 1.2081 0.03090 221 180 36 5
5214 Cowboy Jake lamented that back home on the range, the deer and the antelope no longer play, all that is heard is a disparaging word, and the skies are just cloudy all day. 1.2081 0.03467 221 186 24 11
5215 Well, of course, there can only be one "Raffi"... 1.2081 0.03220 221 182 32 7
5216 Where do the buffalo roam? 1.2081 0.03220 221 182 32 7
5217 Wait! I’m confused. Is the little doggie an actual dog, not a calf?” 1.2081 0.03346 221 184 28 9
5218 Just imagine it's a spotlight. 1.2081 0.03090 221 180 36 5
5219 Don’t blame your mama; she tried to change your career choice! 1.2081 0.03407 221 185 26 10
5220 Could you say that in E-major? 1.2081 0.03407 221 185 26 10
5221 So, you've got to know when to hold em, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, and know when to strum? 1.2081 0.03220 221 182 32 7
5222 But how do the honky tonk blues make you feel? 1.2081 0.03316 197 161 31 5
5223 So how long have you been stuck on a double-flat? 1.2081 0.03316 197 161 31 5
5224 No need to fret. Just stop playing the guitar. 1.2080 0.03174 226 186 33 7
5225 Together, we can work on your misguided wanderlust. However, I must insist on you removing your spurs before you lay down. 1.2080 0.03235 226 187 31 8
5226 Ah, yes, ‘Crazy’ — I believe Willie Nelson wrote it. 1.2080 0.03174 226 186 33 7
5227 And when you pretend to be Willie Nelson, how does it make you feel? 1.2080 0.03235 226 187 31 8
5228 I can write a new prescription, if you can write a song about the old one. 1.2079 0.03188 202 164 34 4
5229 So, Miss Macho, another failed attempt to find your gay side? 1.2079 0.03339 202 166 30 6
5230 You say you're depressed because you lost your girlfriend, dog and pickup truck? 1.2079 0.03264 202 165 32 5
5231 And the hat doesn’t even hold 20 gallons! 1.2079 0.03339 202 166 30 6
5232 You need to dig deeper if you want a hit song. 1.2079 0.03264 202 165 32 5
5233 Singing the blues doesn't mean diddly-squat. 1.2078 0.03305 231 193 28 10
5234 This shrink-country didn’t turn out as well as last week’s shrink-rap. 1.2078 0.03305 231 193 28 10
5235 I'd drop the "little dogies" and just go with a yodel at that point. 1.2078 0.03069 231 189 36 6
5236 Wild West"? More like a Wild Mess... Sorry couldn't help myself. So your wife died 1.2078 0.03305 231 193 28 10
5237 I was an old cowpoke, then I lost my guitar, and only then did I get my PhD. 1.2077 0.03494 207 173 25 9
5238 We've been going over the same stuff for three weeks now. You lost your dog, your truck, your girlfriend. Can't you come up with something else? 1.2077 0.03561 207 174 23 10
5239 How long have you believed you were Gene Autry? 1.2077 0.03141 207 168 35 4
5240 May I suggest we go over 50 minutes and just call it a bonus track? 1.2077 0.03287 207 170 31 6
5241 Now tell me what help your guitar needs. 1.2077 0.03141 207 168 35 4
5242 It's your choice Talk to me for $150.00 an hour Or play by yourself for free... 1.2076 0.03144 236 195 33 8
5243 She said it’s not me, just her strings don’t vibrate like used to! 1.2076 0.02967 236 192 39 5
5244 So you did the old lay-dee too? 1.2075 0.03372 212 176 28 8
5245 The building doesn't allow camp fires. 1.2075 0.03045 241 198 36 7
5246 You're a musician; why does 'big hat, no cattle offend you?' 1.2074 0.03494 188 155 27 6
5247 Can I play the guitar while you write the lyrics? 1.2074 0.03255 217 179 31 7
5248 Enough with the “FEELINGS!” I’m the doctor here! 1.2074 0.03320 217 180 29 8
5249 Ya'll got to stop using the therapist set up so much. Like, honestly. It seems like every other comic is a therapist talking to some character. This is 2019. We all need therapy, okay? It's just not funny anymore. This isn't a Woody Allen film. Jeez. 1.2074 0.03446 217 182 25 10
5250 So, you feel things in Houston just aren't like they used to be? 1.2074 0.02982 217 175 39 3
5251 Country music is really depressing. 1.2074 0.03189 217 178 33 6
5252 I don't CARE if you get along with little doggies 1.2074 0.03189 217 178 33 6
5253 Yeah, so you’re depressed. 1.2072 0.03270 222 184 30 8
5254 Play 'Misty' for me one more time! 1.2071 0.03669 198 167 21 10
5255 It's the G string that's flat. 1.2070 0.03161 227 187 33 7
5256 Do you still want to be called naked cowboy? 1.2069 0.03057 232 190 36 6
5257 So when did you learn the truth about “ropin’ doggies”? 1.2069 0.03176 232 192 32 8
5258 Aie yi, yi yi! 1.2069 0.03537 203 170 24 9
5259 I can actually hear your eyes rolling. 1.2069 0.03176 232 192 32 8
5260 Lover, cheater, fighter, drinker... How about good listener? 1.2067 0.03273 208 171 31 6
5261 So Mr. Presley, why do you think you are a lonesome cowboy. 1.2067 0.03127 208 169 35 4
5262 Tell me how you felt when you realized that whoopee was a trick cushion and not part of a cowboy song? 1.2067 0.03273 208 171 31 6
5263 Apparently, you’re all shook up. 1.2067 0.03273 208 171 31 6
5264 So, overall, would you describe your mood as blue 1.2067 0.03201 208 170 33 5
5265 Where seldom is heard a discouraging word...and the clouds are not cloudy all day... is what home on the range used to be like. 1.2067 0.03127 208 169 35 4
5266 It'l never make the top ten if you don't mention your dead dog, how your ex bashed your pickup truck, and your father called you a 'no good finger pickin' pansy.' 1.2067 0.03412 208 173 27 8
5267 Anything but E. E is all about ego. 1.2067 0.03343 208 172 29 7
5268 Since they're my lyrics,50-50 royalties on "Velvet Couch Blues". 1.2066 0.03034 242 199 36 7
5269 Nobody knows the trouble I've seen Glory, Hallelujah 1.2066 0.03145 242 201 32 9
5270 Very disturbing... so what made you think this "homo's" deranged? 1.2066 0.03423 213 178 26 9
5271 Sing some Bing Crosby I can't stand cowboy songs. 1.2066 0.03154 213 174 34 5
5272 Oh, this session should be a doozy. 1.2066 0.03223 213 175 32 6
5273 Let me see if I understand , your truck broke down, your dog died, and your gal left you? That must feel like quite a hit. 1.2066 0.03423 213 178 26 9
5274 Let's pick 'n' grin where we left off. 1.2066 0.03010 213 172 38 3
5275 I think the blues are causing your blues. 1.2064 0.03109 218 178 35 5
5276 Just say it; don't sing it. 1.2063 0.03318 223 186 28 9
5277 No, I won't call you Tex. What, I tell people I know Tex Nussbaum from Yeshiva? 1.2063 0.03318 223 186 28 9
5278 Hey, wanna change places? 1.2063 0.03553 223 190 20 13
5279 Billy Ray, you've got to embrace the times. 1.2063 0.03130 223 183 34 6
5280 Dog, truck, ex; what about the moonshine? 1.2063 0.03318 223 186 28 9
5281 So tell me, when you split up with Willy and the boys, how did that make you feel? 1.2062 0.03339 194 159 30 5
5282 All right, let's revisit your adolescent memories of the Red River Valley. 1.2060 0.03208 199 162 33 4
5283 'A Midsummer Night's Cowboy' IS catchy but... 1.2060 0.02983 233 190 38 5
5284 Your problem is chronic yodeling. 1.2059 0.03309 204 168 30 6
5285 And how did it make you feel when Hank’s horse kicked you in the head? 1.2059 0.03160 204 166 34 4
5286 Did the roaming buffalo or clear skies bother you more? 1.2058 0.03022 243 200 36 7
5287 Your demographic won’t suspect a theme by Paganini. That’s paranoid. 1.2057 0.03187 209 171 33 5
5288 Now just sing it backwards the whole way through and I promise you your wife will come back. 1.2057 0.03328 209 173 29 7
5289 Frankly, it's the first case I've seen of the famous 'brain surgeon to singing cowboy' syndrome. 1.2057 0.03328 209 173 29 7
5290 Your momma probably didn't want you to grow up to be a cowboy but at least you learned to play the guitar and fix old trucks. 1.2057 0.03187 209 171 33 5
5291 Tell me more about your sad trails 1.2057 0.03187 209 171 33 5
5292 I like everything but country. 1.2057 0.03258 209 172 31 6
5293 So rather than not let you, your mother encouraged you to be a cowboy? 1.2057 0.03258 209 172 31 6
5294 I think your angst comes from being a tennis coach before the horse thing. 1.2057 0.03397 209 174 27 8
5295 I'm a Lonesome Cowboy! 1.2056 0.02923 214 172 40 2
5296 So, is this the song thst convinced your horse to marry you? 1.2056 0.03277 214 177 30 7
5297 And can you believe they didn’t believe I was Willie Nelson? 1.2055 0.03027 219 178 37 4
5298 Well, it's really not that uncommon for them to stop wanting a pearl necklace once you're married. 1.2055 0.03478 219 185 23 11
5299 Play Misty for me , please . 1.2054 0.03244 224 186 30 8
5300 Pardon my Spanish Pedro, but that's loco. 1.2054 0.03118 224 184 34 6
5301 You're right--it would sound better with handclaps. 1.2054 0.03118 224 184 34 6
5302 When you say "range", are you referring to your mother's stove? 1.2053 0.03694 190 160 21 9
5303 Well, as the greatest songwriter who ever lived said, ‘sad songs say so much’, don’t they? 1.2053 0.03295 190 155 31 4
5304 So she saved the horse... how did that make you feel? 1.2053 0.03210 190 154 33 3
5305 Are you sure you were Segovia in a former life? 1.2053 0.03460 190 157 27 6
5306 You don’t have the blues. You’re playing Americana. 1.2053 0.03295 190 155 31 4
5307 Please stop throwing your broken strings on my rug 1.2052 0.03197 229 190 31 8
5308 Is it 'my sweetheart left with my horse' or 'my sweetheart left with my wife' ? 1.2052 0.03314 229 192 27 10
5309 Are you still in the shallow? 1.2052 0.03075 229 188 35 6
5310 Do you know any songs besides “Mama, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys”? 1.2052 0.03075 229 188 35 6
5311 I’m going to recommend you try pop music. I know a good synthesizer. 1.2051 0.02972 234 191 38 5
5312 Frau Schmidt used to yodel just like that. 1.2051 0.03266 234 196 28 10
5313 Four amigos does sound better 1.2051 0.03152 234 194 32 8
5314 Play "Don't Fence Me Id" one more time. 1.2051 0.03554 195 163 24 8
5315 Your truck is gone, but at least you have your guitar and a melody. 1.2050 0.03108 239 198 33 8
5316 Congratulations. You're just crazy enough for American Idol. 1.2050 0.03347 200 165 29 6
5317 Do you think the source of your issues was your father building a fence or was it your mother putting you in the playpen? 1.2050 0.03271 200 164 31 5
5318 From the sound of it, your mother was either too flat or too sharp - hard to say.... 1.2049 0.03506 205 172 24 9
5319 Got in trouble, had to roam Left my gal an' left my home I heard that lonesome whistle blow. 1.2048 0.03244 210 173 31 6
5320 Play it again Sam . . . with feeling this time! 1.2048 0.03101 210 171 35 4
5321 You’ll need to put the guitar down once the stagecoach gets underway 1.2048 0.03173 210 172 33 5
5322 So it seems to me that the blues you sing are linked to your childhood, is that right? 1.2047 0.03127 215 176 34 5
5323 Let's start from the very beginning, a very good place to start. 1.2047 0.03196 215 177 32 6
5324 And when did these dreams about Willie Nelson begin? 1.2047 0.03057 215 175 36 4
5325 This is the last tune that I write for you about your *!#%*! # hat. 1.2045 0.03341 220 184 27 9
5326 Remember when we talked about you taking things too literally? So, last time, I might have used some phrases like “get in tune with those around you,” “achieve harmony”, “get with the beat” . . . 1.2045 0.03150 220 181 33 6
5327 Please, not 'Home on the Range' again. 1.2045 0.03279 220 183 29 8
5328 Have you had thoughts of harming yourself or other folk? 1.2045 0.03341 220 184 27 9
5329 So, tell me, when did you start dreaming that YOU were Willie Nelson" 1.2045 0.03215 220 182 31 7
5330 When did you move to where the buffalo roam? 1.2044 0.03230 225 187 30 8
5331 I like to start from when you woke this up this morning 1.2044 0.03168 225 186 32 7
5332 You’re just a lonesome ole cowboy. 1.2044 0.03390 181 148 29 4
5333 So, tell me again about how your momma tried. 1.2044 0.03566 181 150 25 6
5334 And how did it make you feel, when the store manager refused entry to your emotional support guitar? 1.2043 0.03062 230 189 35 6
5335 Have you considered that an accordion might make you more popular on the trail? 1.2043 0.02960 235 192 38 5
5336 Do you know any cry in your Chablis songs? 1.2042 0.03096 240 199 33 8
5337 Help me, doctor. I always seem to wind up with bad men who know how to pull my strings. 1.2041 0.03463 196 163 26 7
5338 So being a fifth Beetle was your passion. 1.2040 0.02907 250 205 39 6
5339 I just feel like I was really onto something with "Condo of the Rising Sun" 1.2040 0.03257 201 165 31 5
5340 So you say your mother's favorite expression was "Git along little Dogie?" 1.2040 0.03100 201 163 35 3
5341 What is it again that you do, when you get behind closed doors? 1.2040 0.03478 201 168 25 8
5342 So Nationwide is no longer at your side - how does that make you feel? 1.2039 0.03352 206 171 28 7
5343 So, you feel your wife left you because you sing off key? 1.2039 0.03421 206 172 26 8
5344 Keep stringing along and we'll never reach a cure. 1.2039 0.03132 206 168 34 4
5345 So why are you so afraid of being buried on the lone prairie? 1.2039 0.03132 206 168 34 4
5346 This song has been stuck in your “craw for how long”? 1.2038 0.03230 211 174 31 6
5347 How long you say your fingers have been stuck like this? 1.2038 0.03299 211 175 29 7
5348 When did you first notice the guitar singing to you? 1.2038 0.03434 211 177 25 9
5349 All the Federales say they didn't like the tunes you play 1.2038 0.03367 211 176 27 8
5350 Well, I haven't seen you around these parts in awhile. How's your relationship with your mother? 1.2038 0.03230 211 174 31 6
5351 Could you describe it again, this time in English? 1.2038 0.03434 211 177 25 9
5352 How about these lyrics - "A Cowboy on couch in Manhattan, dreamed of his tush on a saddle of satin.......' 1.2037 0.03505 216 183 22 11
5353 Haw yee doing? 1.2037 0.03505 216 183 22 11
5354 Curly, you must realize you are as deserving of the Heifer's love as any cowpoke at the Lazy Y 1.2037 0.03114 216 177 34 5
5355 Do you feel singing about their misfortune helps you forget about your own? 1.2037 0.03379 216 181 26 9
5356 I'm diagnosing you with a "singing cowboy syndrome." 1.2037 0.03249 216 179 30 7
5357 Yippie-eye-yo mama 1.2037 0.03315 216 180 28 8
5358 Buck, you're really an old cowhand on a real divan. 1.2037 0.03315 216 180 28 8
5359 I think you have confused Austin with Austrian... 1.2037 0.03315 216 180 28 8
5360 You're making real progress. Remember, the only way to overcome your fears is to confront them. From the top: Free Bird. 1.2036 0.03202 221 183 31 7
5361 Tell me about the "ten dollar horse and forty dollar saddle." 1.2035 0.03093 226 186 34 6
5362 Yes, but what happens when you sing that in reverse? 1.2035 0.03171 231 192 31 8
5363 Play 'Melancholy Baby' 1.2034 0.03127 236 196 32 8
5364 Medically speaking, it's actually probably better for your aching heart that you play that thing left-handed. 1.2034 0.03127 236 196 32 8
5365 It seems to me, Tex, that you'd rather complain about it than actually go back to the lone prairie. 1.2032 0.03317 187 153 30 4
5366 No, I don't think "where the deer and the antelope play" means you hate your mother. 1.2032 0.02951 251 207 37 7
5367 I hear you... 1.2031 0.03506 192 160 25 7
5368 I'm sorry, but I can't change my notes to lyrics for a country song... 1.2031 0.03583 192 161 23 8
5369 Doc, I just can’t stop strumming her pain with my fingers 1.2031 0.03506 192 160 25 7
5370 If singing is getting you down, maybe you should try the trombone. 1.2030 0.03214 197 161 32 4
5371 Ballad of Making the Love to a Cactus—is that how you would describe your relationship with your mother? 1.2030 0.03521 197 165 24 8
5372 Yes, I understand you're from Alabama, but why did you switch to guitar again? 1.2030 0.03214 197 161 32 4
5373 Have you ever asked yourself why, as a cowboy, you insist on trying to sing the blues? Is it not inappropriate cultural appropriation? 1.2030 0.03371 197 163 28 6
5374 And how does counting your money at the table make you feel? 1.2030 0.03132 197 160 34 3
5375 Zoloft could help your lonesomeness. 1.2030 0.03293 197 162 30 5
5376 Let’s take it from the top cowboy 1.2030 0.03242 202 166 31 5
5377 So this "Home on the Range" you sing of is not really referring to your mother's stove? 1.2030 0.03463 202 169 25 8
5378 Yea Yea you're as much a cowboy singer as I'm a psychiatrist ...ketchy 1.2030 0.03317 202 167 29 6
5379 Do know "Melancholy Baby"? 1.2030 0.03463 202 169 25 8
5380 You say you can't get over all the other cowhands constantly requesting the Billy Joel "Piano Man" song 1.2029 0.03043 207 168 36 3
5381 You know what they say, the grass is always greener on the other side of the Mississippi 1.2029 0.03193 207 170 32 5
5382 Can’t you tell me your troubles in disco? 1.2029 0.03043 207 168 36 3
5383 Here is a song about why I hate therapist 1.2029 0.03119 207 169 34 4
5384 So you feel a wall is keeping you from reaching your potential? 1.2029 0.03193 207 170 32 5
5385 The truth is it won’t be easy, but don’t play for me, Argentina. 1.2028 0.03353 212 177 27 8
5386 Your guitar is a surrogate for your body. If you keep playing it you’ll go crazy. 1.2028 0.03285 212 176 29 7
5387 Tune that thing! 1.2028 0.03301 217 181 28 8
5388 That was a delightful rendition of "I got those cowpoke blues". 1.2028 0.03032 217 177 36 4
5389 How're ya doin' without Chong? 1.2028 0.03301 217 181 28 8
5390 So tell me, in full detail, what happened after you got up this mornin'? 1.2028 0.03101 217 178 34 5
5391 So they call ya Lefty....right? 1.2028 0.03236 217 180 30 7
5392 Yes, I can see where that habit really undermines your happiness. 1.2028 0.03169 217 179 32 6
5393 Understand the Upper West Side, but don't live in it 1.2028 0.03032 217 177 36 4
5394 When you said you had the blues, I didn’t realize you were going to SING them to me! 1.2028 0.03365 217 182 26 9
5395 Why do you think the American Idol judges said you weren't the right fit? 1.2028 0.02960 217 176 38 3
5396 Can you recall any of your feelings, mood, emotions after your performance of the "Freudian Slip" in E Flat Major? 1.2027 0.03188 222 184 31 7
5397 It loves you, too. 1.2027 0.03124 222 183 33 6
5398 Ok, let's start with your Mother... 1.2027 0.03188 222 184 31 7
5399 Next, we will work on your refusal to re-string your guitar as a lefty. 1.2027 0.03124 222 183 33 6
5400 Forget about playing your song backwards. It isn't going to work. 1.2027 0.03058 222 182 35 5
5401 Yes, thats a G chord. Now play me an A minor. 1.2026 0.02951 227 185 38 4
5402 You seem keyed up 1.2026 0.03016 227 186 36 5
5403 I mean, Alan Rickman was 52 when he was cast in Die Hard. 1.2025 0.02998 237 195 36 6
5404 So you feel you're just strumming along with life? 1.2025 0.02901 242 198 39 5
5405 Unfortunately, "the medium is the message". 1.2020 0.03118 198 161 34 3
5406 So, tell me, why do you think Mama tried? 1.2020 0.03199 198 162 32 4
5407 What rhymes with cowhand? 1.2020 0.03586 203 172 21 10
5408 What the heck is jimson weed? 1.2020 0.03375 203 169 27 7
5409 Alright! Just play one more song and then we can go back to the session. 1.2020 0.03375 203 169 27 7
5410 So, you want a home where the buffalo roam and the skies are not cloudy all day? 1.2019 0.03251 208 172 30 6
5411 It just rankles me, Doc. There ain't no purple sage on 42nd Street. 1.2019 0.03179 208 171 32 5
5412 Do you sense an aura between us? 1.2019 0.03179 208 171 32 5
5413 We've talked about this before, and I just can't set appointments as late as midnight. 1.2019 0.03322 208 173 28 7
5414 We seem to be making great progress here. The turning point seems to be when you traded your six-shooter for six strings... 1.2019 0.03271 213 177 29 7
5415 I'm my own grandpa" 1.2019 0.03404 213 179 25 9
5416 So basically, you're defying your mama. 1.2019 0.02988 213 173 37 3
5417 We are talking about Oedipus complex here : like Waylon Jennings said, "Mamas don't let their babies grow up to be cowboys" 1.2019 0.03133 213 175 33 5
5418 Which country singer will you be impersonating today? 1.2019 0.03061 213 174 35 4
5419 How many times do I have to tell you, 'Home on the Range' is in G major! 1.2019 0.03133 213 175 33 5
5420 Therapy in the south is a lot more honky-talk. 1.2018 0.03019 218 178 36 4
5421 It seems like you're having a hard time letting go. I'd recommend that you stop stringing her along. 1.2018 0.03019 218 178 36 4
5422 Segovia told you to grow a beard, you say. 1.2018 0.03222 218 181 30 7
5423 So, after camping west of the Pecos, what happened next? 1.2018 0.03019 218 178 36 4
5424 I charge by the hour, just so you know." "That's funny Doc, so do I. Let me just tune her up a bit. 1.2018 0.03238 223 186 29 8
5425 . . . and crazy for loving you. 1.2018 0.03068 228 188 34 6
5426 Good. Now let's explore why you think the Democratic field needs a 28th candidate. 1.2018 0.03192 228 190 30 8
5427 Now that we've worked through your relationship issues, let's tackle your recent writer's block. 1.2018 0.02873 228 185 40 3
5428 Your problem is you sing off key! 1.2018 0.03130 228 189 32 7
5429 My cure for lonesomeness, sing in tune. 1.2017 0.02902 233 190 39 4
5430 So, tell me about your drummer. 1.2016 0.02890 243 199 39 5
5431 The only responses I get on cowboy dating sites are from real horses. 1.2010 0.03395 194 161 27 6
5432 And how do you feel about the little dogies gittin' along? 1.2010 0.03234 194 159 31 4
5433 Tell me how it feels to be extinct. 1.2010 0.03185 199 163 32 4
5434 Instead of “Misery and Gin”, how ‘bout we try “Blue, Clear Sky”? 1.2010 0.03104 199 162 34 3
5435 You've been strumming and singing I'm an Ol' Cowhand on the Rio Grande a while now...... are we stuck?" 1.2010 0.03185 199 163 32 4
5436 Have you considered switching to a ukulele? 1.2010 0.03104 199 162 34 3
5437 Have you tried Twitter? 1.2010 0.03288 204 169 29 6
5438 So tell me why you're tired of being an old cowhand from the Rio Grande 1.2010 0.03213 204 168 31 5
5439 Shrink: ""I see by your oufit that you are a cowboy." Cowboy: "If you buy an outfit, you can be a cowboy, too." 1.2010 0.02979 204 165 37 2
5440 Hm. Delusions of Grand Ole. 1.2010 0.03431 204 171 25 8
5441 The best way to treat those "Lovesick Blues" is with a chorus of "Keep on the Sunny Side". 1.2010 0.03360 204 170 27 7
5442 Your rejection may have different roots. I don't think you have quite the look for gangsta rap... 1.2010 0.03501 204 172 23 9
5443 So tell me when you first started to feel picked on as a child 1.2010 0.03308 209 174 28 7
5444 And, Norman, when did you first realize you had a thing about horses? 1.2010 0.03308 209 174 28 7
5445 Last session, you featured the blues from your teen-age years. 1.2009 0.03120 214 176 33 5
5446 I see, you feel lonesome, rablin' n on a lost highway, low down, dirty and blue 1.2009 0.03048 214 175 35 4
5447 How do you feel about seeking refuge in Jesus for your wife and dog leaving you in your pickup truck? 1.2009 0.03143 219 181 32 6
5448 Since when have you had this obsession with Mr. Bojangles? 1.2009 0.03163 224 186 31 7
5449 Now let's talk about your home-on-the-range life 1.2009 0.03163 224 186 31 7
5450 How do you feel about that stupid lyric? 1.2009 0.03225 224 187 29 8
5451 The song "Wildfire" makes everybody cry, Lord Beaverbrook. That does not signify that you are the reincarnation of Mr. George "Gabby" Hayes. 1.2009 0.02967 224 183 37 4
5452 Tell me more about your childhood on the prairie. 1.2009 0.02993 229 188 36 5
5453 I dreamt about a horse. 1.2009 0.03056 229 189 34 6
5454 Describe your mental state: yee-haw or yee-naw? 1.2009 0.02928 229 187 38 4
5455 Does 'Home on the Range'' mean something special? 1.2009 0.03056 229 189 34 6
5456 At your next appointment let’s focus on your mother’s salsa and chips. 1.2008 0.02956 249 206 36 7
5457 So you believe that once all the cows are gone, farting cowboys will be next to go. 1.2000 0.03260 220 184 28 8
5458 I guess lately I've just been down on my pluck. 1.2000 0.03130 220 182 32 6
5459 Can you sing anything other than "Row, Row, Row your boat? 1.2000 0.02905 240 197 38 5
5460 So level with me Stu...Did you in matter of fact get yer dog, wife, or job back when y’all sang that song backwards, or is it about time we try another approach? 1.2000 0.03379 195 162 27 6
5461 Is that an A sharp or a B flat? 1.2000 0.03243 215 179 29 7
5462 Tell me again about the home on the range? 1.2000 0.03223 210 174 30 6
5463 Why do you think Bollywood rejects you? 1.2000 0.03400 200 167 26 7
5464 Is there a reason you keep playing the same song?" 1.2000 0.03106 230 191 32 7
5465 The voices tell me it’s going to be a big hit. 1.2000 0.03123 205 168 33 4
5466 So, after that, what became of your pink plush bunny? 1.2000 0.03123 205 168 33 4
5467 So, I'm hearing your misfortune is rooted in your little doggy abandoning you. 1.2000 0.03106 230 191 32 7
5468 Sir, My research indicates that according to one 'M. Haggard', there is neither a proper form of measurement of, nor is there any kind of cure for, this "Ramblin' Fever" of yours... 1.2000 0.03150 225 187 31 7
5469 Sing for me your sad and lonesome tune. 1.2000 0.03050 195 158 35 2
5470 Okay Sue, you called him Pa and he called you son and you come away with a different point of view. 1.2000 0.03243 215 179 29 7
5471 Have you ever considered the possibility that "Hank" really did "do it this way"? 1.2000 0.03021 225 185 35 5
5472 I'll tell you what that song makes me think of, Job Security..... 1.2000 0.03362 210 176 26 8
5473 Freeze all motor functions! 1.2000 0.03243 215 179 29 7
5474 Ain't it hard keepin' it so hardcore? 1.2000 0.03063 220 181 34 5
5475 So, Tex, what does being able to play a guitar left handed have to do with why you hate your mother? 1.2000 0.03196 220 183 30 7
5476 Stick to major chords for now--you're not ready for jazz. 1.2000 0.03219 195 160 31 4
5477 Trains are OK; but I wouldn’t refer to Mama. 1.2000 0.02916 230 188 38 4
5478 Let's explore your verse: Repeatedly thrown from my horse with force. 1.2000 0.02966 205 166 37 2
5479 Hmmm. Your problems stem from childhood. You learned to ride before you learned to stand. 1.2000 0.03243 215 179 29 7
5480 I don't know if I have this right. You say that all life is just three chords and a good horse. I understand the horse, but where do you tie the chords? 1.2000 0.03485 205 173 23 9
5481 I'd show you the notes I wrote, but you probably wouldn't understand them. 1.2000 0.03219 195 160 31 4
5482 A boy named Sue 1.2000 0.02880 235 192 39 4
5483 Your ballad would be exempt from HIPAA 1.2000 0.02916 230 188 38 4
5484 What would happen if you tried singing it in reverse? 1.2000 0.03086 225 186 33 6
5485 I can see you are a rebellious type; you're playing that guitar left handed. 1.2000 0.03106 215 177 33 5
5486 Tell me the part of the buffalo again. 1.2000 0.03079 210 172 34 4
5487 Where the buffalo roam, you say? 1.2000 0.03325 200 166 28 6
5488 Tell me about what's gotten you out of tune? 1.2000 0.03595 190 160 22 8
5489 in percentage terms how big are the parts between country and rock n roll within you 1.2000 0.03496 185 154 25 6
5490 No, Freud never said to refer to your neuroses as “little dogies” and sing to them to “git along”. 1.2000 0.03379 195 162 27 6
5491 I must be getting tired of this profession, I’ll listen to anybody! 1.2000 0.03579 185 155 23 7
5492 No, Bill, you are not Jimi Hendrix. 1.2000 0.03714 175 147 21 7
5493 How would you put that in words? 1.1992 0.02767 251 205 42 4
5494 So, how long ago did you discover your real last name is "Chalupa?" 1.1992 0.02894 241 198 38 5
5495 Depression, despair, and loss, can be beautiful! 1.1992 0.02953 241 199 36 6
5496 So you are saying, you split up because your home was not actually big enough for both you and the buffalo? 1.1991 0.03271 231 195 26 10
5497 Okay those are your blues. Now give me the reds. 1.1991 0.03009 226 186 35 5
5498 So when did you become convinced that the Nobel Prize Committee is conspiring against you? 1.1991 0.03320 226 191 25 10
5499 Play the old hit song, Going out of my Mind. 1.1991 0.03137 226 188 31 7
5500 And just how did you deny your Mama's feelings when she tried to steer you better? 1.1991 0.03050 221 182 34 5
5501 From the Rio Grande, you say? 1.1991 0.02982 221 181 36 4
5502 I don't suppose you could play something we could sing to! 1.1991 0.03117 221 183 32 6
5503 Do me a favor. Stop singing the blues. 1.1991 0.03093 216 178 33 5
5504 So this Rosalita who is jumping higher...this Senorita by the fire is someone you know? 1.1991 0.03162 216 179 31 6
5505 So next time let’s talk about your fascination with a little doggie and it’s travels. 1.1991 0.03162 216 179 31 6
5506 Try playing "I've Always Been Crazy" again. 1.1991 0.03347 211 177 26 8
5507 Unless you've been hitting people with it, your guitar does not count as a defense mechanism. 1.1991 0.03066 211 173 34 4
5508 You probably shouldn't take it personally that they didn't like Mahler's "I am lost to the world." 1.1990 0.03259 206 171 29 6
5509 Have you tried changing your tune to something positive? 1.1990 0.03110 206 169 33 4
5510 So, you say she insisted you put the guitar down? Go on... 1.1990 0.03110 206 169 33 4
5511 Do I know 'why I'm feelin' so blue, doc'? I'm not sure - strum a few bars. 1.1990 0.03259 206 171 29 6
5512 Let's see: it rhymes with 'transference....' 1.1990 0.03330 206 172 27 7
5513 Are you telling me that "Eleanor Rigby" was originally a ranchera? 1.1990 0.03110 206 169 33 4
5514 This 'cayuse' you have referred to...do you keep in touch? 1.1990 0.03185 206 170 31 5
5515 If it's gunna be like that, my rates are going up. 1.1990 0.03310 201 167 28 6
5516 For next week, let's try the Bozo the Clown costume. 1.1990 0.03169 191 156 32 3
5517 Compared to Roy and Gene, I just don't have what it takes! 1.1989 0.03307 186 153 29 4
5518 Can you try something in a major key? 1.1989 0.03541 181 151 24 6
5519 And quit binge watching “Unforgiven”. 1.1983 0.02942 242 200 36 6
5520 Okay, you've mastered the blues. Maybe it's time to pivot to something a bit peppier. 1.1983 0.03167 242 204 28 10
5521 I'm not sure if Malignant Cosplay is in the manuals Mr Potts. Why don't we try Delusions of Grand Ole Opry? 1.1983 0.02958 232 191 36 5
5522 How long have you been playing the cigar, er, guitar? 1.1982 0.03186 227 190 29 8
5523 Had you experienced theses feelings prior to all of your rowdy friends settling down ? 1.1982 0.03247 227 191 27 9
5524 Whatever gave you the idea you'd play guitar left-handed? 1.1982 0.02997 227 187 35 5
5525 You were the last person I thought I would collaborate with, Dr. Dre. 1.1982 0.02970 222 182 36 4
5526 All my rivers have run dry" is a little dated. Try "my power has no bars" and see how that feels 1.1982 0.03038 222 183 34 5
5527 Was Irene your mother's name? 1.1982 0.03038 222 183 34 5
5528 Git Along Little Dogies, a metaphor perhaps.... 1.1982 0.03149 217 180 31 6
5529 Every time you play me that song I fall deeper in love with you, Ringo. But now we have to stop. How's next Tuesday at 10:00 1.1982 0.03409 217 184 23 10
5530 Do you think your mother misses her guitar? 1.1982 0.03346 217 183 25 9
5531 Well Stan, why do you think your music started sounding like Lady Ga Ga’s? 1.1982 0.03149 217 180 31 6
5532 I'm sorry to hear that you and Buzz parted ways. 1.1982 0.03010 217 178 35 4
5533 I've just been solo for so long. 1.1982 0.03081 217 179 33 5
5534 Tell me about yourself 1.1982 0.03282 217 182 27 8
5535 So your mama was a hardscrabble waitress from Laredo. How does that make you feel? 1.1981 0.03125 212 175 32 5
5536 I must preface my next question with a trigger warning. 1.1981 0.03125 212 175 32 5
5537 To be honest, your issues sound more underground than bluegrass. 1.1981 0.03333 212 178 26 8
5538 Have you tried a more upbeat genre? 1.1981 0.02902 212 172 38 2
5539 How do you feel about 'Ole Gray' refusing to giddy up anymore? 1.1981 0.02978 212 173 36 3
5540 I wrote the lyric down but play it in a different chord progression. 1.1981 0.03386 207 174 25 8
5541 According to your love songs, it appears that your relationship isn't going too well. 1.1981 0.03244 207 172 29 6
5542 It seems you are facing major problems. 1.1981 0.03316 207 173 27 7
5543 I've really captured your likeness, Dave. 1.1980 0.03441 202 170 24 8
5544 So your guitar had a rough childhood... 1.1980 0.03142 202 166 32 4
5545 Dad I know I am your son!”But remember I have 8 years of college and I am a qualified psychologist. 1.1980 0.03499 197 166 23 8
5546 Singing the blues is my specialty. 1.1980 0.03023 197 160 35 2
5547 No one knows you are not the president when you are on Twitter 1.1979 0.03560 192 162 22 8
5548 Well I bet them doggies do enjoy it 1.1974 0.03129 233 195 30 8
5549 What concerns you besides your children at the border? 1.1974 0.03187 233 196 28 9
5550 So you can't stop strumming the blues?" 1.1974 0.02883 233 191 38 4
5551 So, your no longer feeling the blues. 1.1974 0.03112 228 190 31 7
5552 "Your life really sucks? 1.1974 0.03049 228 189 33 6
5553 Very interesting. Flat strings, flat affect. I wonder if there is a paper in that. 1.1973 0.02958 223 183 36 4
5554 That's right, for only $19.95, you can have Sigmund Freud's complete works read by the master himself accompanied by all of your Mariachi favorites. Call now and we will throw in Jung with Emo at no additional charge. 1.1973 0.03026 223 184 34 5
5555 Tell me again how it felt when your Ma left you. 1.1973 0.02958 223 183 36 4
5556 Tell me about your home life. 1.1973 0.02958 223 183 36 4
5557 I didn't ask you to sing your sorrows. I asked if you'd be seeing her tomorrow. 1.1973 0.03092 223 185 32 6
5558 For the last time, I am not Lady Gaga but your therapist. 1.1972 0.03068 218 180 33 5
5559 You have helped me so much that I am taking notes for my book. Thank you. 1.1972 0.03203 218 182 29 7
5560 Let's talk about your ma. 1.1972 0.03332 218 184 25 9
5561 It's just... I've never even SEEN an antelope! 1.1972 0.03395 218 185 23 10
5562 Try this: "Ain't got that feelin' baby, no, no, no." 1.1972 0.02927 218 178 37 3
5563 Tell me more about your mother in this home on the range. 1.1972 0.03203 218 182 29 7
5564 What do you think will happen if you play Whoopie Ti-Yi-Yo with Jazz chords? 1.1972 0.03449 213 181 22 10
5565 Slim, you should not feel inferior because you cannot play Classical Gas as good as Mason Williams. Most of the cows probably don’t know the song anyway. 1.1972 0.03318 213 179 26 8
5566 I've heard that you are a rambling man that was tied to a whipping post, but let's keep it lighter today ... tell me more about that sweet Melissa. 1.1972 0.03251 213 178 28 7
5567 Putting your feelings into song has really helped, but I’m still not sure the outfit’s role in all of this. 1.1972 0.03040 213 175 34 4
5568 That's all good and well, but how do you FEEL about the death of your beloved dog Blue? 1.1972 0.03112 213 176 32 5
5569 You need to work more on "Feelings." 1.1971 0.03157 208 172 31 5
5570 Your playing is very mature,but if you need my help I require cash, music won't make it 1.1971 0.03371 208 175 25 8
5571 Even though you are playing guitar and singing, your song selection "When A Cowboy Trades His Spurs For Wings" does not make you appear any less suicidal. 1.1971 0.03157 208 172 31 5
5572 I'm paid to be 'attuned' to your feelings 1.1970 0.03205 203 168 30 5
5573 Is that C, G7, F or C, F, G7? 1.1970 0.03128 203 167 32 4
5574 Sing the blues Mr Adams, sing the blues. 1.1970 0.03354 203 170 26 7
5575 'Generally, you ain't learnin' nothing when your mouth's a-jawin'. 1.1970 0.03255 198 164 29 5
5576 You know, singing about your personal issues is a little confusing when you play in an upbeat rhythm. 1.1969 0.03224 193 159 30 4
5577 All hat and no tattle 1.1968 0.03187 188 154 31 3
5578 Now play that cord again.....very interesting 1.1967 0.02958 239 198 35 6
5579 I fix emotions, not guitar strings 1.1967 0.02898 239 197 37 5
5580 Sing me about your father. 1.1967 0.02958 239 198 35 6
5581 Your words are sad, but you actually *sound* pretty happy. 1.1967 0.02958 239 198 35 6
5582 Let's delve deeper into why you sing about trading your spurs for wings. 1.1966 0.02807 234 191 40 3
5583 Can you recall when you started experiencing double bass envy? 1.1966 0.02807 234 191 40 3
5584 Last week you talked about your separation anxieties stemming from when your ex-wife ran over your dog while driving away in your mobile home. This week tell me about your mother. 1.1966 0.02997 234 194 34 6
5585 Sing about your mother. 1.1966 0.03117 234 196 30 8
5586 With what we've learned of the circumstances of your birth, I really don't expect to see you next week. 1.1965 0.03037 229 190 33 6
5587 While I appreciate the sentiment, serenading me will not lower your bill, Carl. 1.1965 0.03221 229 193 27 9
5588 Dale would have loved that 1.1964 0.03079 224 186 32 6
5589 And how is the old cowhand from the Rio Grande these days? 1.1964 0.03013 224 185 34 5
5590 So, in your dreams you know how to wow them with your cowboy music? 1.1964 0.02946 224 184 36 4
5591 So what's your charge foe a fifty-minute one hour show? 1.1964 0.03143 224 187 30 7
5592 I see, you want to kill your bass player and marry your drummer" 1.1964 0.03079 224 186 32 6
5593 So, to recap: Susannah, in Alabama, with a banjo are out. You've decided to explore love with Margot in NYC with a guitar. 1.1963 0.03055 219 181 33 5
5594 When do you think this Lonesome Cowboy fixation first began, Mr Jones? 1.1963 0.03318 219 185 25 9
5595 How long have been unable to prevent “La Cucaracha” from playing in your head? 1.1963 0.03189 219 183 29 7
5596 Okay, okay, but -- back to your mother .... 1.1963 0.03027 214 176 34 4
5597 Can you hum a few bars to your being unable to connect emotionally with your mother? 1.1963 0.03237 214 179 28 7
5598 Okay Colt, tell me more about that home on the range. 1.1963 0.02721 214 172 42 0
5599 Stum it all you like but I can tell you she's not coming home. 1.1963 0.02878 214 174 38 2
5600 I'd suggest stick to the rhythm and drop the blues songs. 1.1963 0.03237 214 179 28 7
5601 If you changed it to Irma rather than Trigger it might stand a better chance. 1.1962 0.03287 209 175 27 7
5602 And your dog dying yesterday... How does that make you feel? 1.1961 0.03035 204 167 34 3
5603 If I’m hearing you correctly you’re saying that while you were walking one morning for pleasure you spied a man singing to cows. 1.1961 0.03114 204 168 32 4
5604 Home on the Sofa” is not a song; and quit calling me Pard 1.1959 0.02909 245 203 36 6
5605 This is a better hobby than strangling my kids. 1.1959 0.03371 194 162 26 6
5606 Now about "Git along little doggies...." 1.1959 0.03209 194 160 30 4
5607 When did you first feel that your mama didn't support your decision? 1.1958 0.03005 240 200 33 7
5608 Picture a range where buffalo's roam, and you hadn't lost to the fella with the tool belt. 1.1957 0.03104 235 197 30 8
5609 No, you may not sing me your song of troubles. 1.1957 0.02897 230 189 37 4
5610 Your mother hated the piano, didn't she? 1.1957 0.02962 230 190 35 5
5611 It's your money, but I suggest you git along little dogie. 1.1956 0.03131 225 188 30 7
5612 Need a back-up singer? 1.1956 0.03315 225 191 24 10
5613 Home on the Range one more time, please! 1.1955 0.03369 179 148 27 4
5614 Doc, My dog died,my horse is lame and oh, my wife left me and went off with my best friend. How do you think I feel? 1.1955 0.03110 220 183 31 6
5615 That’s one crazy G-chord.” 1.1955 0.03110 220 183 31 6
5616 Perhaps the conflict stems from “Lefty” revealing too much about your true political beliefs. 1.1951 0.03022 205 168 34 3
5617 Its so lonesome in the saddle since my horse died 1.1950 0.03225 200 166 29 5
5618 I think it would help if you turned that into a positive. Where would you like to be buried if not the Lone Prairie? 1.1950 0.03225 200 166 29 5
5619 You say you ‘wrote a little song about it,’ how does it go? 1.1950 0.03225 200 166 29 5
5620 Maybe your mother would like you if you even just tried Mozart. 1.1950 0.03065 200 164 33 3
5621 My philosophy is simple - Git along little dogie. 1.1949 0.02973 236 196 34 6
5622 Sorry, but I don’t know what comes after the C minor 7 either. 1.1949 0.03356 195 163 26 6
5623 So you lost your wife AND your job? I told you this would happen, Zeke. 1.1947 0.03329 190 158 27 5
5624 So how many years have you tried for a cowboy role in the movies? 1.1947 0.03242 226 191 26 9
5625 Oh bury me not in the lone shrinks office" sounds like the lyric of a man who's one string short of a guitar 1.1947 0.03054 226 188 32 6
5626 Say it with music. 1.1947 0.03118 226 189 30 7
5627 Did your mother play guitar all of the time, too? 1.1947 0.03180 226 190 28 8
5628 Could you please put the guitar down so we can Along With it, Little Dogie. 1.1946 0.03163 221 185 29 7
5629 As you were saying, you were stuck inside of Mobile with the Memphis blues again? 1.1946 0.03030 221 183 33 5
5630 Tell me again about your mother lode. 1.1944 0.03072 216 179 32 5
5631 So you feel out of place? 1.1944 0.02854 216 176 38 2
5632 Once more please . . . what is wide and on your side? 1.1944 0.03072 216 179 32 5
5633 Do they have a name for 'crazy' way out there? 1.1944 0.03072 216 179 32 5
5634 And how long have you been channeling Willie Nelson? 1.1944 0.03209 216 181 28 7
5635 I'm telling you Cameron, cowboys do not sing Bruno Mars. 1.1944 0.03142 216 180 30 6
5636 Ah, I see, you're angry that your law firm fired you. 1.1943 0.03116 211 175 31 5
5637 The question we haven't asked though is were YOU ready for some football? 1.1943 0.03188 211 176 29 6
5638 Three clients sang "Rawhide" this week. 1.1943 0.03258 211 177 27 7
5639 Laredo, I hear where you're coming from. 1.1943 0.03188 211 176 29 6
5640 I think I see the problem. Maybe you should try writing a song about love found. 1.1943 0.03188 211 176 29 6
5641 So your mother's to blame for not letting you have piano lessons? 1.1943 0.03258 211 177 27 7
5642 I can't git a long little doggie for you; you have to git it for yourself. 1.1943 0.03597 175 147 22 6
5643 Mr. Nelson, I would appreciate your NOT singing your problems to me. So far I have divorce, infidelity, and something called a crossover. Let's continue. 1.1942 0.03039 242 203 31 8
5644 Boy, you must really hate your father. 1.1942 0.03087 206 170 32 4
5645 "I think working on those E-flats is going to help your depression." 1.1940 0.03210 201 167 29 5
5646 Why do you s'pose you kin only talk about your momma when you're strummin' your ole guitar? 1.1940 0.03123 232 195 29 8
5647 Express that desire for creativity and originality - play "Freebird." 1.1940 0.03001 232 193 33 6
5648 Winter, spring, summer, or fall; all you have to do is call... 1.1940 0.03182 232 196 27 9
5649 Oh, bury me not on the lone prairie. How long have you had these grim thoughts? 1.1939 0.03261 196 163 28 5
5650 Your Mommy issues don't explain this. 1.1939 0.03096 196 161 32 3
5651 I think maybe this caption contest is only voted on by the submitters mothers 1.1937 0.03475 191 161 23 7
5652 What do you mean by ‘Sometimes I am two people’? 1.1937 0.03313 191 159 27 5
5653 I don't think your verse, '...my horse, ...of course.' really gets to the depth of your pathos. 1.1937 0.03084 222 185 31 6
5654 Your wife left you, your horse was stolen, your dog died and your truck was repossessed. Let me guess, a country song. 1.1935 0.03368 186 155 26 5
5655 Could you clarify on how you feel...trapped in a man's body? 1.1935 0.03059 217 180 32 5
5656 Okay, you’re lonesome, far from home. Now, try to sing one about your mother. 1.1935 0.03453 186 156 24 6
5657 Are you feeling the blues? 1.1935 0.03196 217 182 28 7
5658 Your perseveration is a clue. 1.1935 0.02917 217 178 36 3
5659 Tell me more about this Greyhound station. 1.1934 0.03030 212 175 33 4
5660 Well now, when you put it that way. 1.1934 0.03030 212 175 33 4
5661 And then what did Marshal Dillon do? 1.1934 0.03103 212 176 31 5
5662 Maybe you need a change of scenery. 1.1934 0.02800 212 172 39 1
5663 That tune tells me you're much older than I thought. 1.1934 0.03379 212 180 23 9
5664 Borderline.....What??!! 1.1932 0.03148 207 172 30 5
5665 Keep writing doc, your lyrics along with my music is going to be our therapy 1.1932 0.03486 176 147 24 5
5666 It's important for you to come to terms with your writers block. So please explain which part of the exercise you don't understand. Is it the Yip, the Eee or the I-aye? 1.1931 0.03051 233 195 31 7
5667 You appear to be suffering from "Don't fence me in" disorder. 1.1931 0.03111 233 196 29 8
5668 Tell me about your herd? 1.1931 0.03346 202 170 25 7
5669 So, please tell me more about you hero fixation with cowboys. 1.1931 0.03038 202 166 33 3
5670 You’re saying Cotton Eye Joe is about you? 1.1931 0.03272 202 169 27 6
5671 I know its lonly out on the range, but please don't sing "Home on the range again. 1.1931 0.03419 202 171 23 8
5672 And this unusually flexible older man,how exactly did he seduce you into the ambidextrous lifestyle? 1.1931 0.03272 202 169 27 6
5673 When I said to get into a younger mindset, I didn't mean it like this! 1.1930 0.03093 228 191 30 7
5674 And how does that ballad make you feel, Tex? 1.1930 0.02763 228 186 40 2
5675 I feel like Hank Williams tonight 1.1929 0.03082 197 162 32 3
5676 Listen, you could be in a hundred-horse town and still feel like the Lone Ranger 1.1928 0.02937 223 184 35 4
5677 That second verse could rhyme with “tryst” 1.1927 0.03379 192 161 25 6
5678 Rather than sing it ...tell me more about your early life home on the range. 1.1927 0.03115 218 182 30 6
5679 I was drunk the day my mama got out of prison. 1.1927 0.03248 218 184 26 8
5680 Hmmm ... that’s a tough one. Let’s call my friend Yoko, I am sure she knows how to get you out of that band! 1.1925 0.03230 213 179 27 7
5681 Cayuose Google it 1.1925 0.02943 213 175 35 3
5682 You say this all started when you bought the mustang? 1.1925 0.03090 213 177 31 5
5683 Maybe it's time to let the old ways die Maybe it's time to let the old ways die It takes a lot to change a man Hell, it takes a lot to try Maybe it's time to let the old ways die 1.1925 0.03230 213 179 27 7
5684 Okay, so you named your guitar Bruce! 1.1925 0.03090 213 177 31 5
5685 Let's drill down into this "Yippee-i-yay," and try to find the "Ki-yo." 1.1925 0.03017 213 176 33 4
5686 There are more lucrative ways to rebel against a controlling mother 1.1925 0.03230 213 179 27 7
5687 So, did your wife run away with your dog and your best friend, or is just the same old country song? 1.1925 0.03230 213 179 27 7
5688 Williie, play ‘Always on My Mind’. 1.1925 0.02943 213 175 35 3
5689 [No caption needed] 1.1925 0.03230 213 179 27 7
5690 And exactly how did the harmonica cutting into your lead, make you feel? 1.1925 0.03017 213 176 33 4
5691 No, I don't know "Mama, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys". 1.1923 0.03280 208 175 26 7
5692 And how many times do you think you have watched "The Legend of Buster Scruggs?" 1.1923 0.03208 208 174 28 6
5693 For our next session, I want you to sing about when your dad left you and your mom. 1.1923 0.03208 208 174 28 6
5694 Stop! Enough already. You're making me homesick with that verse about "where seldom is heard, a discouraging word." 1.1923 0.02978 234 195 33 6
5695 So tell me, how the hell did you become a left-handed -guitar-playin'- "big hat -no cattle" kinda guy? 1.1923 0.03215 234 199 25 10
5696 Most of the herd says they dont like country western songs. 1.1921 0.02954 229 190 34 5
5697 Forget the caption contest...this is a great idea! 1.1921 0.02821 229 188 38 3
5698 It seems important to you to play the same old tune each session and to sing it off key. What comes to mind about that? 1.1921 0.03262 229 195 24 10
5699 Tell me more about these roaming buffaloes. 1.1921 0.02943 203 166 35 2
5700 Please repeat that. What does a woman want? 1.1921 0.03182 203 169 29 5
5701 Lots of words rhyme with "horse", but the more important question is, why are you proposing to one by writing a song? 1.1921 0.03331 203 171 25 7
5702 Playing second fiddle really struck a chord, and I experienced A Major Depression...or was it B Minor... 1.1920 0.03059 224 187 31 6
5703 Lefty, Park Avenue doesn't rhyme with Rio Grande. Sorry. Try again. 1.1920 0.03124 224 188 29 7
5704 Stop calling me your little doggie! 1.1919 0.03309 198 166 26 6
5705 Yippi-ki-why do you feel that way? 1.1919 0.03531 172 144 23 5
5706 You know, Willie Nelson plays right handed. 1.1918 0.02893 219 180 36 3
5707 So,Lefty,the dust that Pancho bit down South ended up in your mouth. 1.1918 0.03169 219 184 28 7
5708 I think we should probe more deeply your dream where your horse, Dootise, makes you chicken and waffles for dinner... 1.1916 0.02855 214 175 37 2
5709 Do you feel comfortable enough to talk about the 'cathing'? 1.1916 0.03216 214 180 27 7
5710 So how do you feel about "I'm so lonesome I could cry"? 1.1916 0.03147 214 179 29 6
5711 So you're saying that you think playing left-handed makes you sound the way Hendrix would have if Hendrix had been doing Country & Western? 1.1915 0.03419 188 158 24 6
5712 What comes after ‘home, home on the range...?’ 1.1914 0.03194 209 175 28 6
5713 You know, there are pre-arranged funerals. 1.1914 0.03194 209 175 28 6
5714 ...Clinically speaking...'The Blues'... 1.1914 0.03265 209 176 26 7
5715 Sing your story backwards and it might just end in a happy note. 1.1914 0.03335 209 177 24 8
5716 If only your mother could see you now. 1.1913 0.02942 230 191 34 5
5717 It's those boots on my furniture... 1.1913 0.03190 230 195 26 9
5718 You need to realize that country twang is past its time. 1.1911 0.02845 225 185 37 3
5719 sometimes the inner you doesn't correspond to what we would like it to be 1.1910 0.03216 199 166 28 5
5720 Is it possible you are blocked because you are playing with your left hand? 1.1910 0.03054 199 164 32 3
5721 But what do you think the dust means? 1.1909 0.03021 220 183 32 5
5722 Could you refrain from singing this time? 1.1909 0.03021 220 183 32 5
5723 You seriously don't see any phallic symbolism in what you are strumming? 1.1909 0.02952 220 182 34 4
5724 If you didn't want an answer, you shouldn't have asked a question. 1.1908 0.03415 173 144 25 4
5725 How long have you been having the dream about roaming buffalo? 1.1907 0.02992 215 178 33 4
5726 I'm not thrilled with "dying as a way of life," but your use of major chords says to me we're making some real progress... duwaaa, duwaaa! 1.1907 0.03134 215 180 29 6
5727 Just because you picked Adam over Blake on “The Voice” doesn’t necessarily mean you need in depth psychotherapy. 1.1907 0.03202 215 181 27 7
5728 You play some crazy music dude! 1.1907 0.03134 215 180 29 6
5729 If you sing that backwards all your problems will be solved. 1.1907 0.03134 215 180 29 6
5730 How about “Free Bird”? 1.1907 0.02830 236 195 37 4
5731 Stop doc, you're pullin' at my heart strings 1.1907 0.02955 236 197 33 6
5732 Well, the bottom line is your mama paid no mind to Willie Nelson. 1.1905 0.03033 210 174 32 4
5733 Modulation could go some way to resolving the problem. 1.1905 0.02865 231 191 36 4
5734 Let’s start at the ridge where the West commences 1.1905 0.03251 210 177 26 7
5735 And just where did you leave your horse ? 1.1905 0.03117 231 195 28 8
5736 I should tell you I'm not much of a country fan. 1.1903 0.02763 226 185 39 2
5737 Well Tim, I think it's pretty clear what your feelings on the breakup are. Do you think you could put the guitar down now? 1.1903 0.03098 226 190 29 7
5738 So you were the prodigal son of the pioneers? 1.1903 0.03161 226 191 27 8
5739 And you say you're from the Rio Grande? 1.1903 0.03034 226 189 31 6
5740 No, I do not accept Pay Pal, Venmo, or guitar music. 1.1902 0.03301 205 173 25 7
5741 It all started one dark and windy day. 1.1900 0.03009 221 184 32 5
5742 You know there is a difference between alone and lonely? 1.1900 0.03009 221 184 32 5
5743 Thank you for the three chords. Now tell me the truth. 1.1900 0.03279 200 168 26 6
5744 Tell me, Cowboy, did I just strike a chord...? 1.1900 0.03201 200 167 28 5
5745 I’m certain that Willie at first had to accept that he was left-handed. 1.1900 0.03279 200 168 26 6
5746 Next time, bring tens and twenties, not singles and change. 1.1899 0.03120 237 201 27 9
5747 When I ask you what your name and address are, please don't keep singing "I'm an old cowhand, from the Rio Grande" . 1.1899 0.02819 237 196 37 4
5748 And how do you think the pickup truck and light beer that you sing about have influenced you? 1.1899 0.03003 237 199 31 7
5749 How long have you had this obsession to plunk your magic twanger, Mr. Froggy" 1.1898 0.03255 216 183 25 8
5750 Uh huh, so it was The Guitar that serenaded the other woman? 1.1898 0.03120 216 181 29 6
5751 Yeah go ahead, play Never Meant again, I’m sure that’ll help with your depression. 1.1897 0.03251 195 163 27 5
5752 Has there ever been some nice in your life? 1.1897 0.03084 195 161 31 3
5753 So, Uncle Pecos, how did you feel when the cat pulled your whisker out? 1.1897 0.03084 195 161 31 3
5754 I was at your show, it seems I'm not helping. 1.1897 0.02788 232 191 38 3
5755 Do I really have to sing about beer, chicks , and trucks to make it big? 1.1896 0.03094 211 176 30 5
5756 Tell me a little ditty about your father. 1.1896 0.02944 211 174 34 3
5757 That would be disturbing. You don't remotely look like Ted Nugent. 1.1896 0.03237 211 178 26 7
5758 I'm tired of your pious platitudes 1.1896 0.03306 211 179 24 8
5759 Sounds to me like you may have some mama issues. 1.1896 0.02867 211 173 36 2
5760 TELL ME AGAIN WHO FORECLOSED ON YOUR HOME ON THE RANGE? 1.1896 0.03094 211 176 30 5
5761 See if it helps if you stop taking requests for 'I've been down so long, it looks like up to me.' 1.1895 0.03130 190 157 30 3
5762 So not feeling at home on the range caused you to play your guitar left handed ... 1.1894 0.02957 227 189 33 5
5763 Perhaps instead of On the Road Again you could try El Amor de Mi Vida? 1.1894 0.02957 227 189 33 5
5764 A gentleman would not wear a hat indoors. 1.1893 0.02904 206 169 35 2
5765 So you’re saying I’m depressed if I’m writing in the minor key? 1.1893 0.02985 206 170 33 3
5766 Tell me more about your Buffalo fetish. 1.1892 0.03064 222 186 30 6
5767 OK! If you say so, it's a big deal that you can't remember the words! 1.1892 0.03178 185 153 29 3
5768 Still sounds more like you’re just fiddlin’ around. 1.1892 0.02997 222 185 32 5
5769 So you're saying you're a lot country and only a little bit rock n' roll. Peter Giessner, Peapack NJ 1.1891 0.02932 238 199 33 6
5770 Lonesome? Sure I'm lonesome, what cowboy without a horse isn't ! 1.1891 0.02992 238 200 31 7
5771 If you play "Home On the Range" one more time I'm going to have to ask you to leave! 1.1891 0.02745 238 196 39 3
5772 Hey, Doc, have you heard this before? 1.1891 0.03108 238 202 27 9
5773 No, will not join you in singing "I'm an old cowhand from the Rio Grande." 1.1891 0.03264 201 169 26 6
5774 Here's another one you might like. 1.1891 0.03339 201 170 24 7
5775 You don't have sing your answers, just tell me when your Brad Paisley, Peyton Manning nightmares began?" 1.1891 0.03264 201 169 26 6
5776 Good news Tex, I think you are regressing and becoming more even more depressed. Your new songs of woe should become even bigger hits. 1.1891 0.03186 201 168 28 5
5777 There is no such thing as a rhinestone cowboy. 1.1889 0.03107 217 182 29 6
5778 What's on that range again. 1.1889 0.02967 217 180 33 4
5779 Did your father play the guitar? 1.1889 0.02967 217 180 33 4
5780 When did you stop loving your guitar? 1.1889 0.03038 217 181 31 5
5781 Now just where do you think this home where the buffalos roam and the skies are not cloudy all day, is? 1.1889 0.03175 217 183 27 7
5782 . . . yes, sometimes a guitar is just guitar, but your country ditties will always be dreadful . . . 1.1888 0.03394 196 166 23 7
5783 So with your father being a conductor, how did he react when you stopped playing second fiddle? 1.1888 0.03394 196 166 23 7
5784 Look, we're not playing around here!" 1.1888 0.03015 249 211 29 9
5785 Don't be too hard on yourself, afterall what is rockabilly? 1.1887 0.03007 212 176 32 4
5786 I'm sorry, but my patient files are confidential and unavailable for ballad material. 1.1887 0.03152 212 178 28 6
5787 If it’s causing you distress, maybe it’s time you ZZ stop. 1.1887 0.03081 212 177 30 5
5788 And you say you will pay for the wall? No senor, I am not that loco! 1.1887 0.03358 212 181 22 9
5789 So you used to go gay in the saddle... 1.1886 0.03136 228 193 27 8
5790 When did you first start having these delusional thoughts about roaming buffaloes? 1.1885 0.02825 244 203 36 5
5791 Tell me more about your homelife, where the buffalo roam and the deer and the antelope play. 1.1884 0.03125 207 173 29 5
5792 Lovely song, but have you ever considered playing it backwards? Your outlook just might improve. 1.1884 0.03272 207 175 25 7
5793 Let's go back to "Home on the Range". 1.1883 0.03117 223 188 28 7
5794 How many times must I tell you, Trisha Yearwood is already married! 1.1883 0.02921 239 200 33 6
5795 Your lack of high notes seems to hint at your distant relationship with your mother. Let's bring that back into the room. 1.1883 0.02980 239 201 31 7
5796 You keep messing up that classic Tune,I'm gonna be the one in therap 1.1881 0.03172 202 169 28 5
5797 From this valley she said she was ooing. It was a long time ago Red. Time to learn a new song. 1.1881 0.02930 202 166 34 2
5798 I’m writing a prescription, That will help get your cow boy back ! 1.1881 0.03013 202 167 32 3
5799 I understand she took your rescue dog, your zero carbon footprint tiny home, your clean diesel burning truck, your vintage turntable, tube amp and vinyl collection. I just wish she'd left you your balls instead of the guitar. 1.1881 0.03356 218 187 21 10
5800 Yodel-ay-hee-how does that make you feel? 1.1881 0.03025 218 182 31 5
5801 So ... tell me more about this achy breaky heart" Stephen Leibow and Kelly Barbour, Toronto Ontari 1.1881 0.03025 218 182 31 5
5802 This is therapy. Willy would not be impressed. 1.1881 0.03025 218 182 31 5
5803 You play with such unbridled enthusiasm. 1.1881 0.03025 218 182 31 5
5804 Instead of singing them, will you please speak your replies? 1.1881 0.03293 218 186 23 9
5805 So the Gatlin boys just laughed at you, how did that make you feel? 1.1881 0.03025 218 182 31 5
5806 Are you sure you wrote "Home on the Range"? 1.1881 0.03025 218 182 31 5
5807 Aren't you being overly harsh to say your rap career has never really taken off? 1.1880 0.03139 234 199 26 9
5808 Your music does say a lot, but has anyone ever told you what the Oedipus complex is? 1.1878 0.03300 197 166 25 6
5809 Let's figure out how to fretting your life away. 1.1878 0.02790 197 160 37 0
5810 So, you say your horse plays banjo? 1.1878 0.03067 213 178 30 5
5811 When you’re singing to the “lil’ doggies”, how does that make you feel? 1.1878 0.02994 213 177 32 4
5812 So, any progress with the primal yodels? 1.1878 0.02994 213 177 32 4
5813 Your beard seems very nice- good on her for bringing you here. 1.1878 0.03139 213 179 28 6
5814 Well Lefty, that's very illuminating. Do you think I could talk with Freida this afternoon? I have not spoken with her in a number of sessions. 1.1878 0.03067 213 178 30 5
5815 You are repressing your talent trying to play that damn guitar left handed! 1.1878 0.02933 229 191 33 5
5816 Did you ever _try_ to play it right-handed? 1.1878 0.02933 229 191 33 5
5817 Your mama sang, "Git along, little doggie" and so you took that to mean ... 1.1878 0.02998 229 192 31 6
5818 Now tell me what you see when you come down from the fences and open the gate?" 1.1878 0.02998 229 192 31 6
5819 I'm here for help with my new "Cowboy with the blues" song 1.1878 0.03061 229 193 29 7
5820 You are not Woody Guthrie, and stop singing "DoRe Mi" 1.1878 0.03123 229 194 27 8
5821 It’s always “yee-haw”, never “haw-yee”. 1.1878 0.02988 245 207 30 8
5822 So what is this obsession about a sharped dressed man? 1.1875 0.03397 208 178 21 9
5823 Let go you were Willie long before Willie became Willie. 1.1875 0.03104 224 189 28 7
5824 What does the second verse of “I’m a Poor Lonesome Cowboy” reveal about your earliest memories of your mother? 1.1875 0.03036 208 173 31 4
5825 Could you play the chorus in your fourth song off of your first album, just once more? 1.1875 0.03185 208 175 27 6
5826 So your dog died but you're still lonely. Have you tried syncopation? 1.1875 0.02959 208 172 33 3
5827 And how do you feel about that? 1.1875 0.02904 224 186 34 4
5828 So.when did it become impossible for you to stop playing in C# Minor? 1.1875 0.03185 208 175 27 6
5829 Okay, I appreciate your story about a man named Jed. I get that he was a poor mountaineer who barely kept his family fed. Now, how did you say he become a millionaire? 1.1875 0.03112 208 174 29 5
5830 And why do you feel you need the spotlight? 1.1875 0.03352 224 193 20 11
5831 Have you considered electrocution lessons?” 1.1872 0.03127 235 200 26 9
5832 I wrote a song I'd like you to sing... It's very therapeutic. 1.1872 0.02942 219 182 33 4
5833 Finally, someone is listening to me 1.1872 0.03148 219 185 27 7
5834 I’d kill for the Blues, Doc. 1.1872 0.03081 219 184 29 6
5835 It's called "WillieNelsonWannabe Syndrome". 1.1872 0.03237 187 156 27 4
5836 Alright Bill, these dissociative episodes are starting to get out of hand. 1.1870 0.02856 230 191 35 4
5837 Oh give me a home where the DSM’s roam...” does have a catchy quality to it 1.1870 0.02649 230 188 41 1
5838 You see, your guitar represents your desire to be a country and western singer. 1.1869 0.02982 214 178 32 4
5839 You're being sensitive. Of course people will laugh when playing air guitar with a real guitar. 1.1869 0.03195 214 181 26 7
5840 My woman left me for another man, my dog died, my truck broke down....... 1.1869 0.03206 198 166 27 5
5841 Sing me more about your mother dying in a truck crash. 1.1869 0.03362 198 168 23 7
5842 Yes, I understand. I saw the movie. Now, stop already! 1.1867 0.02838 241 201 35 5
5843 Try composing a song about the deep feelings you had for this particular ewe. 1.1867 0.03026 225 189 30 6
5844 The frontier really did a number on you, eh? 1.1867 0.03026 225 189 30 6
5845 What made you think being a buffalo would have been more fun? 1.1867 0.02960 225 188 32 5
5846 All day I've faced the barren waste. 1.1867 0.02823 225 186 36 3
5847 Okay, so I’ve got ‘It may be psychosis to you, but baby I’m still so blue’. 1.1867 0.02960 225 188 32 5
5848 Bashing my head with a guitar might provide temporary relief but would require rescheduling our next session. 1.1866 0.03243 209 177 25 7
5849 Could we switch roles, just this once.... please? 1.1866 0.03098 209 175 29 5
5850 Tell me about your lost love while living on the ranch in G major. 1.1866 0.02867 209 172 35 2
5851 It all started when I was home. Home on the range , where the deer and the antelope play. 1.1866 0.03098 209 175 29 5
5852 So your troubles began when you lost your home on the range. 1.1864 0.02874 236 197 34 5
5853 So! Let me get this straight: you prefer that I pick your guitar rather than your brain? 1.1864 0.02936 236 198 32 6
5854 Was your road always "dusty and lonely"? 1.1864 0.02936 236 198 32 6
5855 A hat and a guitar won't make you a star. 1.1864 0.02631 220 179 41 0
5856 It's called 'The Brookening'. Every musician has a moment they think they are Garth Brooks. 1.1864 0.03000 220 184 31 5
5857 Could it be your emotions are on a range rather than your home? 1.1863 0.03219 204 172 26 6
5858 Chill out, Doc. Music therapy has been proven to be effective. 1.1863 0.03219 204 172 26 6
5859 Shall we start with your dream of becoming a session musician? 1.1863 0.03219 204 172 26 6
5860 You're going to have to accept that Lady Gaga won't sing a duet with you. 1.1862 0.02548 247 202 44 1
5861 Please, Tom, let me ghost write your autobiography and we'll make enough money so we can both get out of this office. 1.1861 0.03158 231 197 25 9
5862 How about Inky-Dinky Spider? 1.1861 0.02974 231 194 31 6
5863 I understand that you never "picked" this profession but I think it's really struck a chord with you! 1.1861 0.02974 231 194 31 6
5864 So Mister Jones, have I understood your lyrics underlying the problem - your dog has run off with another cowboy and your wife was shot by a doggone sheepherder who caught her sneaking up on his flock? 1.1861 0.02778 231 191 37 3
5865 Microsdosing might help you find your home on the range 1.1861 0.02778 231 191 37 3
5866 I don’t believe the song is ‘Out of My Range’. 1.1860 0.03041 215 180 30 5
5867 Now where were we? Ah yes: patient X said "Doc, could you please for the love of jesus drop kick me through the goal posts of life" 1.1860 0.02969 215 179 32 4
5868 Yep, my grandaddy had a banjo on his knee, my daddy had a banjo on his knee, and damned if I ain’t got one too! 1.1860 0.02969 215 179 32 4
5869 Yippee kayo kayay just doesn't seem to cut it, Jethro 1.1860 0.03315 215 184 22 9
5870 I think we should pick up next time it comes around on the guitar. 1.1860 0.03041 215 180 30 5
5871 And what did you love more- your mother or her apple pie? 1.1859 0.03028 199 165 31 3
5872 The fact that you’re willing to pay to have me listen to you sing, likely doesn’t bode well for a career on Broadway 1.1859 0.03110 199 166 29 4
5873 I think it's your obsession with the minor keys that's been holding you back from experiencing a fullfilling life... 1.1859 0.03028 199 165 31 3
5874 How long was this 'dogie?' 1.1858 0.02948 226 189 32 5
5875 Vaquero Joe plays the "Prairie Blues" for his shrink. 1.1858 0.03142 226 192 26 8
5876 Your music is hysterical. 1.1858 0.03014 226 190 30 6
5877 "Hmmm. Well, it's classic AABA song form and clearly Oedipal. I'd say it just needs a final verse and a somewhat, as they say, PHAT-ter groove." 1.1858 0.02741 226 186 38 2
5878 I’m so lonesome I could cry But I keep singing and keep my crying inside 1.1858 0.02741 226 186 38 2
5879 Perhaps you can think of your life as, good enough. 1.1858 0.03180 183 152 28 3
5880 Your anxiety comes from playing guitar backward. Had the same problem with my old patient Jimmy. 1.1857 0.02933 210 174 33 3
5881 May I assume you'll be paying real cash this time? 1.1857 0.03299 210 179 23 8
5882 Yippee ki-yay? You're obviously suffering from whoopee envy. 1.1857 0.03229 210 178 25 7
5883 So... feeling more relaxed with it in your hand? 1.1857 0.02924 237 199 32 6
5884 Just be sure he understands it is an acoustic showdown. 1.1856 0.03241 194 163 26 5
5885 There really is "a song for everything".. 1.1855 0.03187 221 188 25 8
5886 I think you should try another venue! 1.1854 0.03052 205 171 30 4
5887 And what will you be naming this 'long little doggie' once you 'git' it? 1.1854 0.03205 205 173 26 6
5888 So...a home where the buffalo roam, eh? Yup, that's Oedipus all the way! 1.1854 0.03205 205 173 26 6
5889 ‘I see. And how has this Foggy Mountian Breakdown been manifesting itself?’ 1.1854 0.03052 205 171 30 4
5890 Today we will learn to replace automatic bad notes with good ones. 1.1854 0.02973 205 170 32 3
5891 Home on the range... When you see that image, is the house flooded or the range on fire. Groundwater poisoned by pesticides. How does that make you feel? Do you think humans are partly responsible for this? When was the last time you felt that way? 1.1853 0.02962 232 195 31 6
5892 Not only are you off key but your nuts! 1.1853 0.03319 232 201 19 12
5893 My dog died last week 1.1852 0.03099 216 182 28 6
5894 Tell me about yer momma. 1.1852 0.03235 216 184 24 8
5895 Just singing "Mamma Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Cowboys" doesn't really help with the therapy 1.1852 0.03301 216 185 22 9
5896 Hell, my last patient had chapped lips that hurt worse'n that, and he still whistled. 1.1852 0.03235 216 184 24 8
5897 Your problem? Your musik ist nicht wienerisch! 1.1850 0.02936 227 190 32 5
5898 You know, you really should consider taking requests from the audience. 1.1850 0.02800 227 188 36 3
5899 Session Notes: Patient responded well to singing cowboy. 1.1850 0.03331 200 170 23 7
5900 We must go beyond what happened when you rode to the ridge where the West commences. 1.1850 0.03096 200 167 29 4
5901 I've lost my mojo. 1.1848 0.02997 211 176 31 4
5902 So... you were gazing at the moon when you lost your senses? 1.1848 0.03215 211 179 25 7
5903 Is it safe to say, you never went without your security blanket when you were a child? 1.1848 0.02762 211 173 37 1
5904 HonkyTonk Blues?? Could you be more specific? 1.1847 0.02906 222 185 33 4
5905 now, when you say it's "fucked up that john denver had never been to west virginia OR denver," do you feel that this is your father speaking? i agree by the way, it's wack as hell. 1.1847 0.03043 222 187 29 6
5906 On the Rio Grande? 1.1847 0.02835 222 184 35 3
5907 That was very good, very honest, but strum it by me again. 1.1846 0.03142 195 163 28 4
5908 I didn't spend 12 years in college and graduate school to be a music therapist! 1.1846 0.03306 195 165 24 6
5909 First, stop tuning to B, E, C, C, A. 1.1845 0.02756 233 193 37 3
5910 You don’t feel like pluckin’? 1.1845 0.02823 233 194 35 4
5911 I'm hoping you don't end up like Bradley Cooper in a "Star is Born"... 1.1845 0.03116 206 173 28 5
5912 Was That, Depressed about "your country"...or "your country song"? 1.1845 0.03039 206 172 30 4
5913 Your dad’s right, you’re a waste of space and can’t carry a tune, but you do pay my rent, til next week. 1.1845 0.02960 206 171 32 3
5914 And how often do you experience this performance anxiety? 1.1844 0.02806 244 204 35 5
5915 I studied psychiatry, by my mamas knee, underneath a tree, like my granddaddy 1.1844 0.02806 244 204 35 5
5916 Explain to me again the comment "squeal like a pig" 1.1844 0.02924 244 206 31 7
5917 ...and would it kill her to put her laundry in the hamper once in a while? 1.1843 0.02944 217 181 32 4
5918 That'll be $200,000 for today and will include my notes which are your next hit song. 1.1843 0.03016 217 182 30 5
5919 Your therapy bill just went up. I charge for notation. 1.1842 0.02924 228 191 32 5
5920 Frankly I am more of a fan of Metallica 1.1842 0.02924 228 191 32 5
5921 I sure hope your wife enjoys living home on the range as much as you do! 1.1841 0.02962 239 202 30 7
5922 Before we start...I asked you to remove your boots... 1.1841 0.03000 201 167 31 3
5923 Play me the one about your parents' separation. 1.1840 0.03058 212 178 29 5
5924 I think if you can change your songs from Country-Western, you'll have a much more upbeat attitude. 1.1840 0.03130 212 179 27 6
5925 So you can't stop playing 'Sweet Home Alabama'? 1.1839 0.02894 223 186 33 4
5926 Less strum the more I plumb. 1.1839 0.02823 223 185 35 3
5927 It’s ok to come in alone. Leave the man with the hat home. 1.1839 0.02894 223 186 33 4
5928 How do you feel about Indians? 1.1839 0.02894 223 186 33 4
5929 We agreed that the first ‘merrily’ was mine - and don’t get me started on how pitchy it was. 1.1839 0.02823 223 185 35 3
5930 What's the first thing that comes to mind when when I say, "Capo"? 1.1838 0.02876 234 196 33 5
5931 Roscoe, face it, you're in denial 1.1838 0.02746 234 194 37 3
5932 No, 'ritardando' doesn't mean stupidly, but it may mean you're slowing down. 1.1836 0.03025 207 173 30 4
5933 Tell me about your struggles with barre chords. 1.1836 0.02947 207 172 32 3
5934 Let's get back to the hornswogglers if we could. 1.1836 0.03025 207 173 30 4
5935 Just why do you have tears in your ears? 1.1835 0.03207 218 186 24 8
5936 Imagine if the genre hadn't chosen you. What would life look like if you had made all the choices? 1.1834 0.03104 229 195 26 8
5937 No sir, I can not bill 23andMe directly for this therapy session. 1.1833 0.02950 240 203 30 7
5938 And how do you feel being pegged in a specific genre? 1.1833 0.02639 240 198 40 2
5939 Excuse me, why are you singing "O Sole Mio? 1.1832 0.03175 191 160 27 4
5940 So I guess you're the strong, silent type. 1.1832 0.03087 191 159 29 3
5941 That's a strum answer. 1.1832 0.03300 202 172 23 7
5942 'The Ballad of the Antiathexis Cowpoke.' Go on. 1.1831 0.03117 213 180 27 6
5943 And how did that make you feel? 1.1831 0.03117 213 180 27 6
5944 I will honour the discount for singing. 1.1831 0.03187 213 181 25 7
5945 I believe "lone prairie" is just a G chord. 1.1831 0.03045 213 179 29 5
5946 I’m so sorry to hear that. Can you play “Wonderwall” next? 1.1831 0.02896 213 177 33 3
5947 Sure, an ambiguous song about a broken G-string could be a country hit, but that question of moving on from your horse is one that only you can answer. 1.1831 0.03187 213 181 25 7
5948 The next step in your de-sensitivity therapy is to sing 'Home on the Range'. 1.1830 0.02812 224 186 35 3
5949 For starters,change careers immediately ! 1.1830 0.03018 224 189 29 6
5950 So, do you want to tell me about your troubles on the Old Chisholm Trail? 1.1830 0.03018 224 189 29 6
5951 You can't go back. 1.1830 0.02735 235 195 37 3
5952 These here notes from last session say nothin' bout playin' leftie like Paul McCartney. 1.1828 0.03400 186 158 22 6
5953 So you say you played it til your fingers bled? It was the summer of ‘69? 1.1827 0.03275 197 167 24 6
5954 Your life will improve if you make it a show tune, instead. 1.1827 0.03012 208 174 30 4
5955 Okay, okay. Get along little dogie. NOW can we get on with our session? 1.1827 0.03088 208 175 28 5
5956 Virgil, I don't believe "Happy Trails" is an anti-aging song. 1.1827 0.03162 208 176 26 6
5957 Alright! I understand that you're depressed because you've lost your home where the buffalo roam, and the deer and the antelope play. 1.1826 0.02920 219 183 32 4
5958 Hmmmm. Can you say more about the Rio Grande? 1.1826 0.03127 219 186 26 7
5959 Behind the scenes with a singer-songwriter 1.1826 0.03091 230 196 26 8
5960 How long have you had the Long Gone Lonesome Blues? 1.1823 0.03245 192 162 25 5
5961 Country Behavioural Therapy 1.1823 0.03285 203 173 23 7
5962 Well if I'm paying you to be my "music therapist," why do YOU get the couch while I'M stuck with taking notes? 1.1823 0.03210 203 172 25 6
5963 Hourly fee doubled because of guitar. 1.1823 0.03133 203 171 27 5
5964 When did you decide to sing in a minor key? 1.1823 0.03359 203 174 21 8
5965 Maybe you’ll feel better if you speak with a fiddle instead. 1.1822 0.03032 214 180 29 5
5966 This is terrible, when did you first start noticing the symptoms of populism. 1.1822 0.03032 214 180 29 5
5967 Can you play that Freud Chicken song? 1.1822 0.03032 214 180 29 5
5968 And so you see how the 'Mama-guitar-old truck complex' begins in infancy . . . 1.1822 0.03103 214 181 27 6
5969 OK, Doc, but I don't hear the phrase '"A true example of Narcissistic Paranoia" working any better as a Viennese waltz. 1.1822 0.03006 225 190 29 6
5970 Country music is still relevant 1.1822 0.02801 225 187 35 3
5971 SIR GO AND PLAY ELSEWHERE ALLOW ME TO CONCENTRATE ON WRITING 1.1822 0.03037 236 201 27 8
5972 You say you crossed the bridge but you keep coming back to the same complaint. 1.1822 0.02654 247 205 39 3
5973 Maybe switch to polka music. 1.1822 0.02812 258 218 33 7
5974 So, how long have you been feelin’ lonely on the old prai-rie ? 1.1818 0.02835 220 183 34 3
5975 And how did the loss of your horse, your rifle and your girl make you feel? 1.1818 0.03118 187 156 28 3
5976 So, you say that you feel like having a cigarette after you play your guitar. 1.1818 0.02835 220 183 34 3
5977 “I admire your principles, Lefty, but you can be ‘Authentic’ and broke or “Naked’ and rich.” 1.1818 0.03180 198 167 26 5
5978 And... watch me for the changes. 1.1818 0.03074 209 176 28 5
5979 A little largo and a little more allegro. 1.1818 0.03099 198 166 28 4
5980 Sorry Shooter, bluesy campfire songs cannot be applied against your deductible, but providing assistance with my son's admission into Cowboy U, well that's another story. 1.1818 0.03047 220 186 28 6
5981 Sorry to crush your ego, but you will probably never be referred to as a "cowman." 1.1818 0.03180 198 167 26 5
5982 Yes, I have a PhD in twang. 1.1818 0.02978 220 185 30 5
5983 SO you say your mother left with your dog ? 1.1818 0.03221 209 178 24 7
5984 Your problem might be solved with grated floors for the roaming buffalo. 1.1814 0.02843 237 199 33 5
5985 OK, so you're happy with "Home on the Range" wherever it happens to be?! 1.1814 0.02859 226 189 33 4
5986 You never say what “All we gotta do is”, is. 1.1814 0.02645 226 186 39 1
5987 You love your mom, you hate your dad. Interesting song. What does it mean? 1.1814 0.03019 215 181 29 5
5988 Have you tried pretending the stage is your horse? 1.1814 0.02871 215 179 33 3
5989 I remember the thrill when I first heard a guitar but my parents wanted me to be a Dr 1.1814 0.02946 215 180 31 4
5990 Why does throwing the hoolinan mean so much you? 1.1814 0.03159 215 183 25 7
5991 That song," Lulu, you're my one and only," was true? And the relationship ended when her mother caught you and her being intimate . It was Bucky who removed the bell from her neck so she could sneak up on you, and that's why you shot him? 1.1814 0.02878 204 169 33 2
5992 So, Mother wants to know if Little Doggies really get along all that well. 1.1810 0.02942 232 196 30 6
5993 This next one is about performance anxiety, I think you'll dislike it. 1.1810 0.03034 221 187 28 6
5994 Arcadian Stereotypes. 1.1810 0.03061 210 177 28 5
5995 Who would you say is your spirit diva? 1.1810 0.03061 210 177 28 5
5996 Doc, I don’t just sing the blues. 1.1809 0.03084 199 167 28 4
5997 Mmm, if I hum it, can you strum it? 1.1809 0.03084 199 167 28 4
5998 Ever since the D-I-V-O-R-C-E I’ve been L-O-N-E-L-Y 1.1809 0.03450 188 161 20 7
5999 I think you would be happier if you switched to K-Pop. 1.1808 0.03593 177 152 18 7
6000 My recommendation this week is to back up the music on your MySpace profile. 1.1807 0.02704 238 198 37 3
6001 Now that we have the sad cowboy shtick locked down, should we work on the second verse? 1.1807 0.02768 238 199 35 4
6002 So, you blame your mother for your career choice? 1.1806 0.02981 227 192 29 6
6003 How many times are you going to sing that story? 1.1806 0.02847 227 190 33 4
6004 Maybe the real scuttlin’ June bug a’twistin’ in the wind...is your own heart. 1.1806 0.03077 216 183 27 6
6005 Of course I wonder what could have been had I gotten that part in The Big Lebowski,unfortunately Sam Fucken Elliot showed up! 1.1806 0.03409 216 188 17 11
6006 Let's exit denial, singing cowboys ARE passe. 1.1806 0.03146 216 184 25 7
6007 Any numbers about last night's dream? 1.1805 0.03181 205 174 25 6
6008 So, your mama didn’t believe Willie Nelson? 1.1803 0.03054 233 199 26 8
6009 Honest to God, Doc. Their brands were still on fire! And, their hooves were made of steel! 1.1802 0.02883 222 186 32 4
6010 I repeat that your problem is way beyond that "get along little dogie." 1.1802 0.03088 222 189 26 7
6011 So, Dusty, have your sheroes always been cowgirls? 1.1802 0.02883 222 186 32 4
6012 And you say all the antelope left...? 1.1801 0.03048 211 178 28 5
6013 Yeah, I've heard that 'I'm an Old Cow Hand' from you about 50 times. Wanna move on to what's really bothering you? Although, I must say, I'm not trained to deal with hemorrhoids. 1.1800 0.03230 200 170 24 6
6014 I may have some idea of why your legs aren't tan. 1.1800 0.03070 200 168 28 4
6015 Now when you say "yonder" are your referring to your mother or father? 1.1799 0.02996 189 157 30 2
6016 dying with your boots on may or may not be caused a Freudian slip 1.1798 0.02696 228 189 37 2
6017 Yes. Here it is: The dogie hesitation, lonesome contemplation blues... With paranoid features. 1.1797 0.02771 217 180 35 2
6018 So, exactly how long has it been since you saw the Ballad of Buster Scruggs? 1.1797 0.03064 217 184 27 6
6019 That’s lonesome there, not lonely, Cowboy! 1.1797 0.03132 217 185 25 7
6020 The guitar is OK. Sometimes even a banjo is just a banjo." 1.1797 0.03064 217 184 27 6
6021 Unbowed legs and untanned cheeks; I think you're in crisis about being a cowhand. 1.1796 0.03091 206 174 27 5
6022 How is playing “Seven Spanish Angels” a sign of remorse? 1.1796 0.02852 206 171 33 2
6023 I know your an old Cowhand, lets here more about the Rio Grand! 1.1796 0.03091 206 174 27 5
6024 Just because you wrote one uplifting song, doesn't mean you're depressed. 1.1795 0.03115 195 164 27 4
6025 No, I didn't mean that kind of jam-packed session." 1.1795 0.03199 195 165 25 5
6026 So your mother was a coyote. I've heard the tall tales. Enough with the pathos, Bill. 1.1795 0.03042 234 200 26 8
6027 Hmmm. Tell me about another important person in your life. 1.1792 0.03178 212 181 24 7
6028 Mamas' don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys Don't let 'em pick guitars or drive them old trucks Let 'em be doctors and lawyers and such... 1.1792 0.02960 212 178 30 4
6029 I can promise you cloudless skies in here the buffalo are roaming two blocks over. 1.1792 0.02960 212 178 30 4
6030 Once Felina left I could no longer compose. 1.1792 0.02883 212 177 32 3
6031 . . . in the door, out the door —all those girls you THOUGHT you loved before . . . 1.1792 0.02883 212 177 32 3
6032 And that's when you started your artisanal light bulb company? 1.1792 0.03178 212 181 24 7
6033 Was this your mother’s favorite song? 1.1792 0.02810 240 202 33 5
6034 Okay, I've got your age and occupation. You say you're from the Rio Grande? 1.1791 0.03366 201 173 20 8
6035 Tell me more about your home on the range. Tell me more about Mother. 1.1791 0.02974 201 168 30 3
6036 You say that you're an old hand. Where did you say you were from? 1.1791 0.02802 201 166 34 1
6037 Doc, Give me a home, where the buffalo roam, and I don't see a human all day 1.1790 0.02756 229 191 35 3
6038 It started when the wheat fields and the clothes lines and the and the junkyards and the highways came between us. 1.1789 0.03334 190 162 22 6
6039 I don't think Burnham was targeting you specifically, but go on. 1.1789 0.02835 218 182 33 3
6040 In your music I hear a lack of cathexis of the narcissistic libido to modern Life. 1.1789 0.02909 218 183 31 4
6041 And how did you feel about the horse's being dead, too? 1.1787 0.02921 207 173 31 3
6042 So, your wife left you, and your dog died, and you need to quit drink'in". Sounds like an awful country song to me 1.1787 0.02840 207 172 33 2
6043 That you keep playing that horrible tune tells me you have a severe case of passive aggression. 1.1787 0.03078 207 175 27 5
6044 Home on The Range and Don't Fence Me In...that's progress. I have confidence you'll be able to learn Tumbling Tumble Weeds and Ghost Riders in the Sky for our next session. 1.1787 0.02714 235 196 36 3
6045 Let's get drunk and raw dog it. 1.1786 0.03191 224 193 22 9
6046 So your saying you need “a home with a roaming buffalo” ? Hmmmmm 1.1786 0.02929 224 189 30 5
6047 You had a tear in your beer? And how does that make you feel? 1.1786 0.03015 196 164 29 3
6048 How about you ride the horse, and I save the cowboy? 1.1786 0.03015 196 164 29 3
6049 No, I’m afraid you’re not going to be able to barter serenades to pay for your bill. 1.1784 0.02799 241 203 33 5
6050 So you say you don't know who they think they are, smashing a perfectly good guitar? 1.1784 0.02861 241 204 31 6
6051 OCD, ADHD, GAD, PTSD and BiPolar 2. Zanax, as needed 1.1784 0.02947 213 179 30 4
6052 I don't care about your damn pickin'. How do you feel? 1.1784 0.03021 213 180 28 5
6053 So your mother was a poor girl from Guantanamera, and she sang to you when you were growing up in Kalamazoo ... 1.1784 0.03021 213 180 28 5
6054 Mama, don’t let your babies grow up to be cowboys. 1.1784 0.03021 213 180 28 5
6055 So your girl gone up and left you ....your dog gone up and died ANDyou burnt the toast ? 1.1781 0.03106 219 187 25 7
6056 Your time is up. Would you prefer I bill iTunes? 1.1781 0.03038 219 186 27 6
6057 So, you said your mother gave it to you for your fourth birthday? 1.1781 0.02968 219 185 29 5
6058 Nah, still don't sound right. How about switching to jazz? 1.1781 0.02968 219 185 29 5
6059 It appears to me like he’s pulling your strings and winding you up too tight 1.1781 0.02897 219 184 31 4
6060 So how does that make you feel that it's out of tune? 1.1781 0.03038 219 186 27 6
6061 So you're saying that you never even made it to Nebraska before he broke your banjo? 1.1780 0.03059 191 160 28 3
6062 You have a severe case of the Hank Williams complex. 1.1779 0.03064 208 176 27 5
6063 That was interesting but I need to understand who YOU are, not Kenny Rodgers 1.1779 0.02987 208 175 29 4
6064 But your achy breaky heart would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness 1.1779 0.03064 208 176 27 5
6065 I want your therapeutic experience to be comfortable, but we just can't do campfires in the office to for you to tell your whole story. 1.1778 0.02917 225 190 30 5
6066 Range or Couch, make up your mind! 1.1778 0.02778 225 188 34 3
6067 I was dancin' with my darlin' When an old friend I happened to see I introduced her to my loved one and while they were dancin' My friend stole my sweetheart from me 1.1777 0.02909 242 206 29 7
6068 If you don't want to be a "Lonesome Cowboy", maybe you should dress like one? 1.1776 0.03080 214 182 26 6
6069 Enough Waltzing Matilda, I asked for a Viennese Waltz. 1.1776 0.03008 214 181 28 5
6070 Six months of yodel di, yodel dum is enough! 1.1776 0.02935 214 180 30 4
6071 And howdy’s that make you feel? 1.1775 0.02869 231 195 31 5
6072 Now, give me a C. 1.1773 0.03186 203 173 24 6
6073 You came alone to a couples counseling meeting? I told my wife to save a horse, and ride a cowboy. She chose the horse. 1.1773 0.03029 203 171 28 4
6074 I told you you should say everything that comes to your mind, but I didn't say you could strum on your guitar while you do it. 1.1773 0.02812 220 184 33 3
6075 This is such a wonderful session, Butch, I feel so liberated" 1.1773 0.03025 220 187 27 6
6076 Where the deer and the antelope play. Do deer and antelope really play? 1.1770 0.02896 209 175 31 3
6077 When the rodeo has you down. 1.1768 0.03313 198 170 21 7
6078 I understand your DNA profile says your 10% "Little Dogie", but... 1.1767 0.02922 215 181 30 4
6079 So,over ten years of strumming and not yet one lyric from the Inner Self? 1.1767 0.03067 215 183 26 6
6080 I’m told your horse had a delusion in my reception area. 1.1765 0.03094 204 173 26 5
6081 For my next song, I'll play "The Bookcase Blues." 1.1765 0.03080 221 189 25 7
6082 Note to self: This is the moment I can either make or break this singin’ cowboy’s career. 1.1765 0.03012 221 188 27 6
6083 Now, are you gonna tell me how you feel or are you gonna try to be the next Johnny Cash? 1.1765 0.03080 221 189 25 7
6084 Everyone gets lonesome once in a while. 1.1765 0.02943 221 187 29 5
6085 Keep going! If you change the “breakup” stanza to E Minor, we could have a hit! 1.1765 0.02873 221 186 31 4
6086 Don't give up. In another fifty years you'll be a star! 1.1765 0.03012 221 188 27 6
6087 Buster Scruggs did a much better job of it 1.1765 0.03246 204 175 22 7
6088 Let's rap. 1.1762 0.03037 210 178 27 5
6089 It's not so rare as you'd think. You've got Singing Dude Syndrome, Strum Version. 1.1762 0.02883 210 176 31 3
6090 This office will not be big enough for the two of us 1.1760 0.02784 250 212 32 6
6091 You think YOU have daddy issues... 1.1760 0.02573 233 193 39 1
6092 okay so remembering lyrics is a problem... any problem remembering who your singing to. 1.1760 0.02780 233 196 33 4
6093 Maybe opera would be a better choice for your guitar style. 1.1759 0.03054 216 184 26 6
6094 I think it's time we move past Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper. 1.1757 0.02801 239 202 32 5
6095 whoa Nelly 1.1757 0.02924 239 204 28 7
6096 This next exercise will involve you singing it out. 1.1757 0.03000 222 189 27 6
6097 This one is for the shrink I adore. 1.1757 0.03067 222 190 25 7
6098 I have heard that tune over and over again. Let's talk about that imaginary Penguin. 1.1756 0.03002 205 173 28 4
6099 And how did having tears in you ears from lying on your back make you feel? 1.1756 0.03002 205 173 28 4
6100 I appreciate that you think we are making progress, but I would rather not be refereed to as the "June to your Johnny." 1.1756 0.02838 205 171 32 2
6101 You're bearing quite a heavy burden, would you like to repeat that refrain?" 1.1753 0.03270 194 166 22 6
6102 My mother hated my guitar. 1.1751 0.03178 217 187 22 8
6103 Best to return the guitar to the Segovia estate. 1.1751 0.03310 217 189 18 10
6104 Seldom heard discouraging words but I'll need more than, 'my dog has fleas'. 1.1751 0.02897 217 183 30 4
6105 Frankly, Jake, you're going to have to get over this cloven-hoof thing 1.1751 0.02970 217 184 28 5
6106 I appreciate the empathy, but we’re here to talk about the happiness of *your* trails. 1.1751 0.02897 217 183 30 4
6107 Maybe if you sing backwards you’ll get back Lucille and the Chevy PickUp 1.1751 0.02823 217 182 32 3
6108 Don't....forsake....me....oh....my ...darling. It sounds like this is coming from the superego. 1.1751 0.02970 217 184 28 5
6109 Hum while playing the tone difference between G sharp and G flat! I'm beginning to nod ... 1.1751 0.02897 217 183 30 4
6110 LET ME PUT IT IN A SONG. 1.1750 0.03282 200 172 21 7
6111 And you're looking to play to win? 1.1750 0.02790 240 203 32 5
6112 Sigmund and Gunbuckle "Well, it's textbook Oedipal. But let us focus on the bridge." 1.1750 0.02960 200 168 29 3
6113 I wonder if Freud would have found a banjo more interesting 1.1750 0.03125 200 170 25 5
6114 So with the Anteaters down by 12 at the half.... you lost hope and left the arena?? 1.1750 0.02785 200 166 33 1
6115 Lone Cowboy spills his beans. 1.1749 0.02919 223 189 29 5
6116 Tell me more about your High Lonesome Sound. 1.1748 0.02686 246 207 35 4
6117 Okay... was that "trouble cliff" or "treble clef"? 1.1747 0.03246 229 200 18 11
6118 they always ask yee haw but they they never ask haw yee 1.1746 0.03323 189 162 21 6
6119 So, tell me more about, what is it you called them, Do Gees. 1.1745 0.03084 212 181 25 6
6120 Now that we know how that makes you feel... 1.1745 0.03011 212 180 27 5
6121 Thanks, but I prefer jazz... 1.1745 0.03084 212 181 25 6
6122 My horse died, my dog died, my wife left, and a rattlesnake bit me, and that's why I'm singin' this song! 1.1745 0.02759 235 198 33 4
6123 Again, there's no reason to bring the room down. 1.1745 0.02692 235 197 35 3
6124 Same Ole' Song 1.1745 0.02950 235 201 27 7
6125 Do you think they'd take you more seriously if you tried carrying a briefcase instead of the guitar? 1.1744 0.03088 195 165 26 4
6126 You do not really have to Sing your troubles to me!! 1.1744 0.03001 195 164 28 3
6127 Oh...Susanna didn't cry enough for you? Next it's the Banjo! 1.1743 0.03028 218 186 26 6
6128 Perhaps this week you can tune in a bit more. How does that sound? 1.1741 0.02947 201 169 29 3
6129 Oh give me a home, where the buffalo roam and the Mexicans can stay for a day 1.1741 0.03267 201 173 21 7
6130 how long have you thought yourself as a guitar-playing Tenor? 1.1741 0.02539 224 185 39 0
6131 And after your vacation, about how long has this phase you're going through been going on? 1.1741 0.02837 224 189 31 4
6132 Can you sing me that depressing song again? 1.1741 0.02617 224 186 37 1
6133 Let's talk about your fixation on trains, puppies and women of the night! 1.1739 0.03104 184 155 26 3
6134 I'm sitting beside you now tell me your sad story 1.1739 0.02924 230 196 28 6
6135 She broke my heart when I learned she was a He 1.1739 0.03051 230 198 24 8
6136 Refrain, Pain, Sane, Rein, Dame, Mane ..... I think you have writer's block. 1.1739 0.02895 207 174 30 3
6137 Okay, first off, who did this to you, Jimi Hendrix or Paul McCartney 1.1739 0.02989 230 197 26 7
6138 This 'It's your misfortune and none of my own' attitude is not conducive to therapy. 1.1739 0.02895 207 174 30 3
6139 My heros have alway been "back in the U.S.S.R." 1.1737 0.02813 236 200 31 5
6140 I always wanted to be and old cowhand. 1.1737 0.03070 213 182 25 6
6141 Your head'in to the last round-up 1.1737 0.02846 213 179 31 3
6142 What I'm hearing sounds like the country western blues. 1.1737 0.02923 213 180 29 4
6143 Is your missing index finger keeping you out of key with your life? 1.1737 0.03142 213 183 23 7
6144 This is the last time I co-sign a loan for you until you get a REAL job! 1.1737 0.03070 213 182 25 6
6145 It's a matter of accepting the goatee as it is. 1.1735 0.02799 219 184 32 3
6146 Have you considered going back to Old Smoky to win her back? 1.1735 0.02873 219 185 30 4
6147 Tell me, why is it that you call Jose a “bad man”? 1.1735 0.02723 219 183 34 2
6148 Exactly how long have you serenaded your parents? 1.1733 0.02682 225 188 35 2
6149 Nothing, what's up with you? 1.1733 0.02963 225 192 27 6
6150 ‘No matter what your old therapist told you, Singing the Blues is not therapy!’ 1.1733 0.02755 225 189 33 3
6151 When your mother became the star how did that make you feel? 1.1733 0.02963 225 192 27 6
6152 I read where Gibson is now making some nice left-handed guitars. 1.1733 0.03175 202 173 23 6
6153 There's nothing better for the inside of a man than the outside of a horse. 1.1732 0.02712 231 194 34 3
6154 With the next patient, try something besides 'I Fall To Pieces'. 1.1731 0.03039 208 177 26 5
6155 In your previous life, exactly how many head of cattle did you own? 1.1731 0.03039 208 177 26 5
6156 I really miss my banjo... 1.1731 0.02962 208 176 28 4
6157 Can you play "The Ballad of William James"? 1.1730 0.02927 237 203 27 7
6158 No. I can't name any other lefty guitar players. 1.1729 0.02910 214 181 29 4
6159 Yes,very good. How do you feel about group therapy? 1.1727 0.02933 220 187 28 5
6160 Laredo you think, some white linen and where was the clay? 1.1726 0.03143 197 168 24 5
6161 Tell me why the misfortune of the little dogies is none of your own. Perhaps we could start by unpacking your expression, as I heard it, 'whoopee ti yi yo' 1.1726 0.03059 197 167 26 4
6162 No, Pete, I do NOT want to hear your song about how Freddy Mercury came to live in your gol-durn magical cowboy hat. 1.1726 0.02794 197 164 32 1
6163 Did your parents force you to play the guitar as a child? 1.1724 0.03083 203 173 25 5
6164 Your dog bit your girlfriend when you took the train to prison, yada yada yada. Also, I don't like C&W music. 1.1722 0.02870 209 176 30 3
6165 Have you tried watching "Green Acres"? 1.1721 0.03115 215 185 23 7
6166 Or is this how you're paying off your bill? 1.1721 0.02898 215 182 29 4
6167 So, say something" 1.1721 0.02898 215 182 29 4
6168 Your ol’ lady who-ooo....” No, Roy, we call that parapraxis, not yodeling 1.1719 0.02849 221 187 30 4
6169 Dear New Yorker, I submit the following LATE ENTRY for Contest #653: "Actually, I ordered the Tournedos..." Alas, another missed opportunity for greatness... Kind regards. William Hogan Los Angeles 1.1719 0.03254 221 193 18 10
6170 Sing whatever comes to your mind, this will reveal your unconscious thoughts, and it might lead to a Grammy. 1.1718 0.03004 227 195 25 7
6171 Do you think that couch might be big enough for the both of us?..Edward? 1.1717 0.02953 233 200 26 7
6172 Why do my requests drive you crazy? 1.1716 0.02907 204 172 29 3
6173 So, it was your mother's idea that you should become a signing cowboy? 1.1716 0.02907 204 172 29 3
6174 But when your Mother handed you the Ukulele on your 5th birthday, HOW did it make you feel? 1.1716 0.02989 204 173 27 4
6175 Do you always strum Naughty Marietta with your off hand? 1.1716 0.02907 204 172 29 3
6176 I think you are a lonely ranger. 1.1715 0.02716 239 202 33 4
6177 yo put tbat big ass guitar away we tryna have a talk bro 1.1714 0.03012 210 179 26 5
6178 So let me get this straight. You want me to sing, "We're brothers from the same mother. Somos hermanos de la misma madre. We grew up here together. Por favor, no nos separe," at your ICE hearing next week? And you're gonna play your guitar? 1.1713 0.02959 216 184 27 5
6179 Have you always been so low? 1.1713 0.02885 216 183 29 4
6180 So you think the panic attacks began when your father threw you out of your home on the range? 1.1712 0.02908 222 189 28 5
6181 And why is it that you believe you're a little bit country, a little bit alt-country, a little bit Americana and a little bit rock and roll? 1.1712 0.02837 222 188 30 4
6182 Sometimes a guitar isn't just a cigar 1.1710 0.03175 193 165 23 5
6183 I let you keep the guitar, but the he horse stays in the waiting room after the last time on the rug doing his business. 1.1709 0.03194 199 171 22 6
6184 Play a honky-tonk lullaby 1.1709 0.02858 199 167 30 2
6185 Wonderful ! I wrote a whole new article being inspired by your music 1.1708 0.02706 240 203 33 4
6186 No a benefit concert won't pay for it either! 1.1707 0.02975 205 174 27 4
6187 You said this cowboy look started when you grew a beard? 1.1707 0.02975 205 174 27 4
6188 Shouldn't you be at home right now? 1.1707 0.02894 205 173 29 3
6189 There's a tear in my beer Sigmund. 1.1706 0.03146 211 182 22 7
6190 As a Freudian I am bound by my oath to say that although your song is on its face about "Sweet Sandee My Own" it is actually about your penis substitute with which you continuously, yea even now, play with your hands... 1.1705 0.02873 217 184 29 4
6191 Don’t fret; hold your headstock up high. 1.1705 0.03018 217 186 25 6
6192 Have you tried playing your music backwards? 1.1705 0.03088 217 187 23 7
6193 And if we create a megahit, will I be listed as the co-author and producer? 1.1705 0.03018 217 186 25 6
6194 Sir, stop pulling strings. You're playing with my mind. 1.1705 0.02873 217 184 29 4
6195 'I'm so lonely I could die 'has already been written. How about you give me 5 cows and we call this session over. 1.1703 0.02848 229 195 29 5
6196 Unplugging live wires to the past was a metaphor. 1.1703 0.02780 229 194 31 4
6197 Just because we now have self-driving vehicles, doesn't justify you singing 'my truck done left me'. 1.1703 0.02980 229 197 25 7
6198 ... and how does that make you feel? 1.1702 0.02867 235 201 28 6
6199 Ah! I see you have fixed your broken six strings. Now let's get started with fixing that broken heart of yours. 1.1701 0.02821 241 206 29 6
6200 Give me land, lots of land, 'neath the starry skies above . . . 1.1701 0.02986 194 164 27 3
6201 It’s difficult to analyze why you fret so much about our sessions. 1.1701 0.02986 194 164 27 3
6202 I hope you are not just stringing me along. or Stringing me along will not help. or Stop stringing me along. 1.1701 0.02986 194 164 27 3
6203 Yes, I think Buckaroo Freud would like your tribute. 1.1701 0.03074 194 165 25 4
6204 Fella, since you were born on the right side of the tracks, give up trying to write a good blues song. 1.1701 0.02895 194 163 29 2
6205 Song song blue, everybody knows one! 1.1700 0.02932 200 169 28 3
6206 Yes, your simple song of heartache does give me insight into your Freudian dilemmas. 1.1700 0.02932 200 169 28 3
6207 At least it isn't an atypical emotional attachment. 1.1700 0.02845 200 168 30 2
6208 So you always end up playing Purple Haze and the Star Spangled Banner 1.1699 0.03118 206 177 23 6
6209 I'm thinking barter system. 1.1698 0.02910 212 180 28 4
6210 It’s my lonely heart, doc. 1.1698 0.02585 212 176 36 0
6211 Yes, it does get lonely in those hills 1.1698 0.02986 212 181 26 5
6212 So, you're angry at your Mama because ever since you were a baby she didn't want to let you grow up to be a Cowboy?" 1.1697 0.02934 218 186 27 5
6213 So, this aura starting to surround us- Does it only occur when you play the guitar? 1.1697 0.02861 218 185 29 4
6214 And that was when I decided to become a cowboy. 1.1697 0.02786 218 184 31 3
6215 Well, I think my problems stem back in time, when my horse and my cattle were my only companions...... 1.1696 0.02953 224 192 26 6
6216 Let’s see...your woman left you, the government is taking your ranch, and your doggies are lost on the range...I’m getting mighty tired of your hard luck stories. 1.1696 0.02769 230 195 31 4
6217 What makes you say you're out of tune with Maggie Six-String? 1.1694 0.02870 242 208 27 7
6218 It's perfectly fine to play guitar left-handed. Just ask Jimi Hendrix. Oh wait, he's dead." 1.1693 0.03209 189 162 22 5
6219 So tell me, why did you feel threatened when she asked for equal rights? 1.1693 0.03028 189 160 26 3
6220 I’m a lone cowhand. 1.1693 0.03120 189 161 24 4
6221 I think you're singing through your hat. 1.1692 0.03060 195 166 25 4
6222 Let's talk about your relationship with Ole Pokey without the music. 1.1692 0.02972 195 165 27 3
6223 Tell me about your earlier career as a ukulele player. Like, before you became a famous guitarist. 1.1692 0.02972 195 165 27 3
6224 You should keep busking this summer but make an effort to get a gig before the fall. 1.1692 0.03164 201 173 22 6
6225 So, Tex, how long have you had these recurring dreams about tumbling tumbleweeds? 1.1692 0.02743 201 168 32 1
6226 Songwriting team, Pa McCourtney and Dr. John Lenmitzer , write: "Her teeth were awesome...But she really should floss 'em...Our love would blossom...And we'd eat possum." 1.1692 0.02919 201 170 28 3
6227 It's time to get some new strings. 1.1691 0.02949 207 176 27 4
6228 "And you say you have been feeling nostalgic for what period in history? 1.1690 0.02820 213 180 30 3
6229 Sing me the one again about the lonesome spine. 1.1690 0.02820 213 180 30 3
6230 Let's delve a little deeper into this "and western" aspect... 1.1690 0.02973 213 182 26 5
6231 And was this a shooting range ? 1.1690 0.02741 213 179 32 2
6232 So, you’re saying that feel like you’re a lone cowpoke? 1.1690 0.02898 213 181 28 4
6233 Dave, your ballads are not necessarily enmity; they are merely misused and made occasions for enmity. 1.1690 0.02898 213 181 28 4
6234 You see...let me tell you a little ditty about Jack and Diane.... 1.1690 0.03119 213 184 22 7
6235 Thanks for the compliment, Lester, but I'm not 'cookin' anything up with you, and I find the question to be highly inappropriate. 1.1689 0.02992 219 188 25 6
6236 Not winning a Grammy will not change who you are..... 1.1689 0.02849 219 186 29 4
6237 John Denver you're not 1.1689 0.02802 225 191 30 4
6238 How long have you felt this way about Old Bill Jones' daughter? 1.1689 0.02941 225 193 26 6
6239 Fuck...I don’t know what to call that. Sophocles doesn’t say anything about cousins. 1.1689 0.03073 225 195 22 8
6240 And the waking up this morning, how did you make you feel? 1.1688 0.02716 237 201 32 4
6241 You were right in seeing a Shrink, we know something about singing the Blues 1.1684 0.03014 190 161 26 3
6242 I see. And Brokeback Mountain lost Best Picture in ‘05,you say? 1.1684 0.03014 190 161 26 3
6243 Thanks Doc, I just came up with a new song title. "You and this room depress me" 1.1684 0.02868 196 165 29 2
6244 When in public, may I suggest that you substitute “finger pickin’” for “cotton pickin’” ? 1.1683 0.03070 202 173 24 5
6245 I'm not certain but I don't think Mr. Six String is covered by your insurance. 1.1683 0.02906 202 171 28 3
6246 Aw shucks, it's either this or running for office! 1.1683 0.02773 208 175 31 2
6247 So what you're basically saying is that the guitar needs this even more than yourself? 1.1683 0.03014 208 178 25 5
6248 So you have this nightmare about a wall. Tell me more. 1.1683 0.03014 208 178 25 5
6249 Yes. Clearly, you are disappointed with her lack of concern about your career choice. Might we begin to explore some OTHER facets of your relationship with your mother? 1.1683 0.02936 208 177 27 4
6250 Well, do you want to get out of the shal-la-la-lows? 1.1683 0.02856 208 176 29 3
6251 Well Mr. Gibbons, you seem to be suffering from a temporary form of Delusional Disorder. ‘She Got Legs’ is not a cowboy song and is not about your horse. 1.1682 0.02909 220 188 27 5
6252 I'm thinking split personality already. It's when you can't concentrate on one thing a a time. 1.1682 0.02909 220 188 27 5
6253 I'll see your 6 strings, 4 divorces, and 3 addictions, and I'll raise you a DSM-5 and tons of Schedule 2 drugs. 1.1681 0.02861 226 193 28 5
6254 If you want a record deal, perhaps you should sing something other than ballads. 1.1681 0.02929 226 194 26 6
6255 Can you play a song about your id? 1.1681 0.02814 232 198 29 5
6256 No, you are not a reincarnation of Gene Autry, not even close. 1.1681 0.02678 232 196 33 3
6257 Why do you think ‘Home On The Range’ didn’t crack the top 40? 1.1681 0.02571 238 200 36 2
6258 This is not the Ok Corral. Stop with the Dueling Banjos already! 1.1680 0.02849 244 210 27 7
6259 So you think that on your lap it's a guitar? 1.1676 0.02858 185 155 29 1
6260 Is Lonesome Cowboy really the only song you know? 1.1675 0.02892 203 172 28 3
6261 I am an old woman, named after my mother... 1.1675 0.02923 209 178 27 4
6262 I call this "Ode to my mother". 1.1675 0.03001 209 179 25 5
6263 So what percentage of the royalties do I get? 1.1675 0.02843 209 177 29 3
6264 Perhaps the dying cowboy was your father. Could the white linen represent the marital bed? Was your mother in the dream? 1.1674 0.02717 215 181 32 2
6265 Mister Cassidy, don't keep anything under your hat. 1.1674 0.02947 215 184 26 5
6266 Let's call it lunch 1.1674 0.02873 215 183 28 4
6267 So you're angry at me because I didn't like your song? 1.1674 0.02825 221 188 29 4
6268 Mother likes my notes better than yours. 1.1674 0.02967 221 190 25 6
6269 So Blake.... you say Adam won the four-chair turn? 1.1674 0.02967 221 190 25 6
6270 Get over here, quit being such a tease 1.1674 0.02780 227 193 30 4
6271 I did not schedule you to be entertained 1.1674 0.02780 227 193 30 4
6272 Have you told The Pico Kid about your feelings? 1.1667 0.03007 216 186 24 6
6273 Your legs ain't bowed but your mood is low. Yippie yi yo kayah. 1.1667 0.02831 210 178 29 3
6274 And how did your mother feel about old cowhands? 1.1667 0.03136 210 182 21 7
6275 You're no Johnny Cash. 1.1667 0.03007 216 186 24 6
6276 It's an old old story and very sad. 1.1667 0.02813 222 189 29 4
6277 Have you thought of trying hip-hop? 1.1667 0.02768 228 194 30 4
6278 So what exactly does it mean to be eliminated in the Battle Round? 1.1667 0.02955 222 191 25 6
6279 And how long had you being singing Nomano cow hand before you realized it? 1.1667 0.02837 228 195 28 5
6280 So, you are saying that this cucaracha was able to walk before? 1.1667 0.02987 210 180 25 5
6281 So far I've got: 'You're an old cowhand from the Rio Grande', but when did you actually learn to ride?" 1.1667 0.03162 192 165 22 5
6282 Where did you learn all these sad chords? 1.1667 0.02885 222 190 27 5
6283 It's a living! 1.1667 0.02861 216 184 28 4
6284 But you’re still saying the same thing over and over again 1.1667 0.03078 216 187 22 7
6285 Out in the west Texas town of El Paso... 1.1667 0.03345 204 179 16 9
6286 Oh my darlin', oh my darlin' , oh my darlin' Tex Cline, Please tell me, please tell me, tell me what is on your mind. 1.1667 0.03101 198 170 23 5
6287 Please, not another dusty road song! 1.1667 0.02879 204 173 28 3
6288 You me you don't know the lyrics to Big Rock Candy Mountain. 1.1667 0.02794 204 172 30 2
6289 Home on the Range has already been written. 1.1667 0.02831 210 178 29 3
6290 Please sing to me why you miss your horse. 1.1667 0.02750 198 166 31 1
6291 Talk more about growing up with Mother, who could never seem to cut the chord. 1.1667 0.02955 222 191 25 6
6292 Agreed. It's a long day, when you've got nothing to do --- in Texas. 1.1667 0.02987 210 180 25 5
6293 I don’t know why nobody told you how to unfold your love. 1.1667 0.02831 210 178 29 3
6294 It would sound lots better if you used a left-handed guitar. 1.1667 0.02792 234 200 29 5
6295 I’m sorry, but I don’t speak music. 1.1667 0.03136 210 182 21 7
6296 I feel like I’m just twiddling my thumbs all the time. 1.1667 0.02987 210 180 25 5
6297 This is no time to be horsing around. 1.1667 0.03042 204 175 24 5
6298 Yep,I'm learning to play the guitar that she left me when she rode my horse into the sunset. 1.1667 0.03121 204 176 22 6
6299 Now what's the next line after, "My dog died near the trailer?" 1.1667 0.02935 216 185 26 5
6300 Sorry, but the hat clearly said, "Hufflepuff". 1.1667 0.02873 240 207 26 7
6301 It seems to me you never had to learn how to deal with criticism constructively. 1.1659 0.02757 229 195 30 4
6302 Please play a few bars of "Home On the Range" and tell me what you're feeling about it. 1.1659 0.02615 229 193 34 2
6303 It’s okay that you believe in reincarnation....The way you sing and play guitar makes me agree that in your prior life you were the Singing Cowboy, Gene Autry. 1.1659 0.03010 223 193 23 7
6304 Are you sure you wouldn’t rather use a ukulele? 1.1659 0.02802 223 190 29 4
6305 I thought all you country western singers are either looking for love or are depressed 1.1659 0.02729 223 189 31 3
6306 You're telling me THAT got you a long little doggy? 1.1659 0.03065 217 188 22 7
6307 ``I'm just gonna write that you lived without electricity in your biography'' 1.1659 0.02694 217 183 32 2
6308 I can help with everything but finding your stolen truck. G Blundell. Nanaimo , B C 1.1659 0.03049 211 182 23 6
6309 Blake, it has been three years since Adam beat you for the fifth straight season. Does Gwen agree with how you are handling the situation? 1.1659 0.02866 205 174 28 3
6310 Responding only with guitar chords frighten your family & me too! 1.1659 0.02782 205 173 30 2
6311 Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? 1.1658 0.03147 193 166 22 5
6312 I know you miss singing to your doggies but you can adopt on at the ASPCA. 1.1658 0.02970 193 164 26 3
6313 Play a happy tune or you're dismissed! 1.1658 0.03120 187 160 23 4
6314 And how long have you had 'yippee-ki-yay, mother issues'? 1.1653 0.02687 248 212 31 5
6315 Yes, I understand your wife is high-strung. But let's try to verbalize it now. 1.1653 0.02770 236 202 29 5
6316 You need to face the facts Mr. Eubanks; You are NOT Marie Antoinette. You are Tammy Wynette 1.1652 0.02814 230 197 28 5
6317 We need to find a good stressor for you. 1.1652 0.02930 224 193 25 6
6318 Tell me why you keep playing “Lonesome Cowboy”? 1.1652 0.02930 224 193 25 6
6319 And, then you started singing after you gave your girlfriend a horse suppository, yes? 1.1651 0.02910 218 187 26 5
6320 Let's start by your hearing about your childhood home on the range. Singing is optional. 1.1651 0.02885 212 181 27 4
6321 Sorry, I help acrophobiacs, not anachronisms. 1.1651 0.02961 212 182 25 5
6322 Look, Doc. You be me and I'll keep being you. What makes you do you feel like an underrated singer just cuz you got no PhD? 1.1651 0.02961 212 182 25 5
6323 This week, let's try combining music therapy and poetry therapy. 1.1651 0.02961 212 182 25 5
6324 Play something that best reflects your mood. 1.1650 0.02769 206 174 30 2
6325 You say you have a case of the blues? 1.1650 0.03015 206 177 24 5
6326 Yippee yi yo kayah" just doesn't work as a #hashtag Roy 1.1650 0.03231 200 174 19 7
6327 Could you give me a walking bass line for this part? 1.1650 0.03153 200 173 21 6
6328 And were your family people who had specific musical preferences? 1.1650 0.03153 200 173 21 6
6329 Nobody told you, you couldn't sing in tune? Sad. 1.1646 0.02589 243 206 34 3
6330 Don't sing you answers to me. 1.1646 0.02694 237 202 31 4
6331 What can you sing for me about your mother? 1.1645 0.02870 231 199 26 6
6332 No! You cannot marry that guitar. 1.1645 0.02803 231 198 28 5
6333 They're all outta rhinestones, and I'm gitten' mighty depressed! 1.1645 0.02666 231 196 32 3
6334 Joe, I'm sorry to inform you that the buck stops here. 1.1645 0.02735 231 197 30 4
6335 Good, and if you ever find yourself listening to country radio, just repeat your mantra: "Florida Georgia Line is not the herald of the Apocalypse. Florida Georgia Line is not . . ." 1.1645 0.02998 231 201 22 8
6336 It seems pretty clear to me you have something known as the "breakup blues." 1.1644 0.02706 225 191 31 3
6337 I agree. Oedipus probably would have been much happier if he had a hobby, like playing guitar or rodeo. 1.1644 0.02632 225 190 33 2
6338 Your version of "Home on the Range" is nice. Now tell me about yourself. 1.1644 0.02898 219 188 26 5
6339 So what happened after you woke up this morning? 1.1644 0.02510 219 183 36 0
6340 I have friends in low places..... 1.1644 0.02898 219 188 26 5
6341 I think if play it backwards, things will improve 1.1644 0.02969 219 189 24 6
6342 Yes, your wife is in the Heartbreak Hall of Fame, but that tells me little about you feel about your mother. 1.1643 0.02948 213 183 25 5
6343 You really have figured out this psychology stuff. We need to switch chairs.. 1.1643 0.02872 213 182 27 4
6344 I hear, I hear... 1.1643 0.03001 207 178 24 5
6345 What brings you to therapy, Mr. Presley? 1.1643 0.03001 207 178 24 5
6346 While I write the lyrics you sing. Best kind of therapy for us both! 1.1642 0.02803 201 170 29 2
6347 Who knew our weekly songwriting sessions would be therapeutic, Dr. Dre? 1.1641 0.03031 195 167 24 4
6348 Let’s see if we can help you find words to describe each of these feelings... 1.1640 0.03090 189 162 23 4
6349 You know sooner or later you better give me one of those Grammys! 1.1639 0.02768 244 210 28 6
6350 Can you remember how you felt when spied the cowpuncher singing, "Whoopee ti yi yo, git along little dogies?" 1.1639 0.02579 244 207 34 3
6351 That you can still sing, even though you can no longer speak, is a well known neurological syndrome. 1.1639 0.02707 244 209 30 5
6352 Did you say your mother or your brother threw the overalls in Mrs. Murphy's chowder? 1.1638 0.02923 232 201 24 7
6353 Perhaps next week we can discuss your home but this ‘range’ won’t do. 1.1636 0.02702 214 181 31 2
6354 YOU REALLY SHOULD GET THAT TUNED UP 1.1636 0.02860 214 183 27 4
6355 You opened the genre with, Just a Lefty from the Left Coast. 1.1635 0.02988 208 179 24 5
6356 So, let's see if I got this: you've been feeling lonesome because your little doggie got along. Right? 1.1635 0.02659 208 175 32 1
6357 And how long has it been so important to you to be buried not on the lone prairie? 1.1635 0.03065 208 180 22 6
6358 Have you tried playing your country songs backwards? Then you might get everything back. 1.1631 0.02714 233 199 30 4
6359 Lonesome. Do you mean literal or figurative? And did the crying ... how literal was that? 1.1631 0.02714 233 199 30 4
6360 And how are things at the homestead? 1.1631 0.02574 233 197 34 2
6361 they always say "yeehaw", but never ask "haw yee?" 1.1631 0.02911 233 202 24 7
6362 Play me 1.1629 0.02726 221 188 30 3
6363 I would think you can continue hiding as an itinerant cowpoke in therapy as long as you don't shave, Mr. Hoffa but what makes you feel it's time to join ZZTop? 1.1629 0.02801 221 189 28 4
6364 I think you're letting your irritation of 'Despacito' distract you from your underlying abandonment issues Juan. 1.1629 0.03013 221 192 22 7
6365 What you are describing is a cliche country song. 1.1628 0.02923 215 185 25 5
6366 And then whud you parents do? 1.1628 0.02923 215 185 25 5
6367 This Doctor-Cowboy role reversal game is so empowering! 1.1628 0.02847 215 184 27 4
6368 I Want to Be a Cowboy's Sweetheart" is not the song you want to use as your personal theme song 1.1628 0.02996 215 186 23 6
6369 De-pressed-a-cito 1.1628 0.02847 215 184 27 4
6370 Have you tried playing the bass? 1.1628 0.02770 215 183 29 3
6371 Quite frankly, Mr. Quixano, it's clear that changing genres was not the correct approach. Instead, I'd like to start you on a more aggressive treatment and recommend you stop reading books altogether. 1.1628 0.02770 215 183 29 3
6372 Let's hear that one again, but this time at a slower tempo. 1.1627 0.02896 209 179 26 4
6373 When she called you a hick, how did you respond? 1.1627 0.02896 209 179 26 4
6374 All those sad minor chords.We’ve gotta strive to turn more of them MAJOR! 1.1627 0.02559 209 175 34 0
6375 So you say you're a "Cowboy and on a steel horse you ride".... 1.1627 0.02816 209 178 28 3
6376 I’m glad that I hired you for mood music when I have my sessions with Beyonce. 1.1625 0.02727 240 206 29 5
6377 Well, of course you're blue, cowboy. 1.1624 0.02824 197 167 28 2
6378 Is this really helping you step into my shoes, doc? 1.1624 0.03002 197 169 24 4
6379 Let's go over this one more time to make sure I got down the words to your new song right. 1.1623 0.02745 228 195 29 4
6380 Carry on, please, this is definitely a light-bulb moment. 1.1623 0.02882 228 197 25 6
6381 I 'm not sure dressing up and singing "I am lonesome" will cure you. 1.1623 0.02745 228 195 29 4
6382 Hmmm.... 1.1623 0.03013 228 199 21 8
6383 If you want to get back your woman, dog and truck; try playing your song backwards! 1.1622 0.02789 222 190 28 4
6384 Can you play, "I love my wife but oh, you Id"? 1.1622 0.02639 222 188 32 2
6385 It’s about being in the spotlight....and the hat of course! 1.1622 0.02823 185 156 28 1
6386 Wait, wait, "bum ba dida, bum ba -", what's next? 1.1620 0.02910 216 186 25 5
6387 You got your lack of rhythm from your mother. 1.1620 0.02983 216 187 23 6
6388 So, I hear you saying 'Whoopie ti-yi-yo, get along little dogie..." Help me understand the cultural nuance underlying the existential journey. Drew Bridges Wake Forest, NC 1.1620 0.02679 216 183 31 2
6389 Ok, love songs,horses, sounds like a good place to start 1.1618 0.02652 241 206 31 4
6390 But enough about me. 1.1618 0.02780 241 208 27 6
6391 If you were to get an electric guitar, you could play ohm on the range. 1.1618 0.03172 204 178 19 7
6392 You know as well as I do that I’m not your little dogie.” 1.1617 0.02888 235 204 24 7
6393 Our mother didn’t favor me; she said lefties make better musicians. 1.1616 0.03073 198 171 22 5
6394 I saw your last record, I will need to see you for 10 years to get you back to sanity. 1.1615 0.02954 192 164 25 3
6395 Let me explain in the best way I know how... 1.1613 0.03197 186 161 20 5
6396 I don’t think “Home on the Range” is helping. 1.1613 0.02668 217 184 31 2
6397 am I supposed to treat your psychosis or sing your song? 1.1611 0.02791 211 180 28 3
6398 ...you restrung your guitar like Hendrix did, yet it doesn’t sound good?...I know how you feel...I’m transgender, yet I still feel out of tune... 1.1611 0.02791 211 180 28 3
6399 Well Bill that's certainly your sorrowful sound but I think we could make more progress with some doo-wop. 1.1611 0.03024 211 183 22 6
6400 You are getting much better Mr. Slim. 1.1610 0.02614 236 201 32 3
6401 Wrap it up Lefty...my 'outfit' cancelled the Singing Cowboy Discount after last week's session. 1.1610 0.02748 236 203 28 5
6402 No, you cannot have my services for a song. Julia Patella, Centennial, CO 1.1610 0.02748 236 203 28 5
6403 Now, do you have dreams about that note being flat? 1.1610 0.03002 205 177 23 5
6404 Your strumming is acting-out, touch a blanket instead of the guitar 1.1610 0.02838 205 175 27 3
6405 So, I see you've adopted the singing cowboy persona! 1.1610 0.02921 205 176 25 4
6406 So, you are a lonely cowboy because your mamma let you - her baby -pick guitars and drive old trucks, instead of pushing law or medicine. Interesting. Sing me more Waylon. 1.1609 0.02925 230 200 23 7
6407 We must explore together the tools you will need to break free of the lable, "the singing cowboy". 1.1609 0.02792 230 198 27 5
6408 How about trying "If I Had a Dream?" 1.1609 0.02792 230 198 27 5
6409 i got the horses in the back 1.1608 0.03058 199 172 22 5
6410 Oedipus didn't actually want to sleep with his mother. 1.1606 0.02885 218 188 25 5
6411 Why do you think Ado Annie feels sorry for the pony? 1.1606 0.02811 218 187 27 4
6412 You don't look like Gene Autry 1.1606 0.02656 218 185 31 2
6413 Try playing with the RIGHT hand, it might better match your vocals. 1.1606 0.02735 218 186 29 3
6414 Rebecca, didn't you say you were right-handed? 1.1604 0.02936 212 183 24 5
6415 Where did we come from? Where did we go? 1.1604 0.02858 212 182 26 4
6416 You’ve actually told me about Home Home on the Range previously. 1.1603 0.02671 237 203 30 4
6417 Yes, you are blue. But you won't be blue always. 1.1603 0.02603 237 202 32 3
6418 Make psychoanalysis great again 1.1602 0.03067 206 179 21 6
6419 I see, so you're only hear because you need more emotion in your songs. Should we talk about your ex-wife then? 1.1600 0.02785 200 170 28 2
6420 But then, I happen to know that there's a little Lebowski on the way. I guess that's the way the whole darned human comedy keeps perpetuatin' it-self, down through the generations, westward the wagons, across the sands a time .... 1.1600 0.02826 225 194 26 5
6421 It is my considered opinion that your story/song would be improved with the banjo in place of the guitar. 1.1600 0.02755 225 193 28 4
6422 When did you realize no one else would listen to your songs of woe? 1.1600 0.02960 200 172 24 4
6423 So you became hoarse after your horse died? 1.1598 0.02482 219 184 35 0
6424 How 'bout Wiener Blut? 1.1598 0.02873 219 189 25 5
6425 Same old tune today, Travis Lee. 1.1598 0.02873 219 189 25 5
6426 I hear you sing that your mother hated diesels so bad. What does this mean to you? 1.1598 0.02833 194 165 27 2
6427 Can you play anything else besides Crazy Train? 1.1598 0.03015 194 167 23 4
6428 Sorry, Tex. I'm leaving you. Found me another cowboy. 1.1597 0.02727 238 205 28 5
6429 Ok, let's move past home, home, on the range... 1.1596 0.02923 213 184 24 5
6430 Please C me next week again. 1.1596 0.02686 213 181 30 2
6431 So, you're upset because you didn't get voted sexiest man alive?' 1.1596 0.02883 188 160 26 2
6432 ...and when did this attachment start? 1.1595 0.02836 232 201 25 6
6433 Listen, Clyde... These sessions are going nowhere. I've told you before, if you feel so guilty about it just tear the crossword answers out of the book. Now if that's all you need, my wife is getting her tubes tied in about an hour. 1.1595 0.02901 232 202 23 7
6434 I've never seen starry skies above. What are they like? 1.1594 0.02895 207 178 25 4
6435 It ain 1.1593 0.02671 226 193 30 3
6436 Thanks. That"s the one my mother sang to me. 1.1593 0.02596 226 192 32 2
6437 If you have to play, at least play something that will help me sleep. 1.1592 0.03030 201 174 22 5
6438 So he told you to squeal first 1.1591 0.02861 220 190 25 5
6439 Tell me about your ma. 1.1590 0.03001 195 168 23 4
6440 Now, I’m depressed because I have nothing left to sing about. 1.1589 0.02755 214 183 28 3
6441 Please describe this Grunge Cowboy persona? 1.1588 0.02621 233 199 31 3
6442 You're not my client! Guess you're the opening act! 1.1587 0.02716 208 177 29 2
6443 How would you feel about a duet? 1.1587 0.02800 208 178 27 3
6444 Cowboy, I really don’t care! 1.1587 0.02629 208 176 31 1
6445 The music is nice, but I’m still unable to get past my writer’s block” 1.1586 0.02802 227 196 26 5
6446 You're not Keith Richards without a skull ring. 1.1584 0.03016 202 175 22 5
6447 The Naked Cowboy is my brother. 1.1584 0.02933 202 174 24 4
6448 Cheer it up! Play some Roy Rogers tunes. 1.1584 0.02933 202 174 24 4
6449 Doc, he keeps telling me how to write my jingles. 1.1584 0.02849 221 191 25 5
6450 I'm no expert but having never ridden the range, or slept in a bunkhouse, or been in the vicinity of a live, actual cow, or even play that thing, at all well, may strike a note of performance inauthenticity. 1.1584 0.02776 221 190 27 4
6451 Mmm, what rhymes with void? 1.1581 0.02743 215 184 28 3
6452 I can trace all of your problems back to your boyhood home on the range. 1.1579 0.02575 228 194 32 2
6453 My stagefright is so bad, Doc, I can't even use public transportation. 1.1579 0.02869 209 180 25 4
6454 So tell me why you decided that the piano didn't work for you? 1.1579 0.02721 228 196 28 4
6455 You only think "neigh" is a negative term. 1.1579 0.02788 209 179 27 3
6456 What do you mean, it's not the right venue for country music? 1.1579 0.02869 209 180 25 4
6457 You are not me one-hundred and fifty years ago. 1.1579 0.02788 209 179 27 3
6458 Draw me like one of your French girls 1.1579 0.03025 209 182 21 6
6459 Would you mind playing Blue Moon of Kentucky? 1.1577 0.02612 222 189 31 2
6460 How did that make you feel, watching your daughter lick a sledgehammer? 1.1577 0.02837 222 192 25 5
6461 Was that a B-flat or B-sharp? 1.1577 0.02764 222 191 27 4
6462 And you said it was your WIFE that wouldn't allow you to, as you put it, "crack open a cold one with the boys"? 1.1577 0.02837 222 192 25 5
6463 You have the bovine boy blues. 1.1577 0.02837 222 192 25 5
6464 Look, you need to stop blaming yourself for the death of your father. Sure, you can look back and see all the red flags now, but it’s normal not to see them in the moment. Even if you managed to see the signs in time, there’s no guarantee that treatm 1.1576 0.02835 203 174 26 3
6465 Yeah, same old shit. 1.1576 0.03082 203 177 20 6
6466 Thanks for the cut from your last hit. Now let's get to work on the next one. 1.1576 0.02920 203 175 24 4
6467 How long have you had pickotellomania? 1.1574 0.02669 235 202 29 4
6468 Tell me again how riding an old paint makes you feel. 1.1574 0.02569 216 183 32 1
6469 Look at the bright side: It's not so hard to come up with a rhyme for 'dog still loves me'. 1.1574 0.02809 216 186 26 4
6470 No, that’s not how you spell it.” (Asa, age 8 1.1574 0.02959 216 188 22 6
6471 So, how long have you had these feelings of jealousy against the naked cowboy? 1.1574 0.02793 197 168 27 2
6472 You have got to get beyond playing just cowboy chords. 1.1572 0.02710 229 197 28 4
6473 There is not much call for Willie Nelson look-alikes 1.1571 0.02857 210 181 25 4
6474 oYu're not home on the range anymore 1.1571 0.02935 210 182 23 5
6475 Give me "Red River Valley" again. 1.1570 0.02620 242 208 30 4
6476 I see you are relaxed, being yourself, not using electronics. I am going to have to work hard to figure out what your problem is. 1.1570 0.02752 223 192 27 4
6477 Let me get this straight, from now on you only want to perform for cattle? 1.1570 0.02602 223 190 31 2
6478 Why do you think you are having difficulty translationing to “ New Country “ music ? 1.1570 0.02964 223 195 21 7
6479 Just take a simple C and G and you'll feel brand now about it. 1.1570 0.02825 223 193 25 5
6480 D flat, D flat... dooodododoooooo 1.1569 0.02735 204 174 28 2
6481 If I'm hearing you correctly, your childhood was more cacophonous than mellifluous... 1.1569 0.02822 204 175 26 3
6482 You have to know how to ride a horse to be a real cowboy. 1.1568 0.02726 236 204 27 5
6483 I see you are ready to tell me about your time in San Quentin State Penitentiary 1.1568 0.02659 236 203 29 4
6484 Soul ! 1.1567 0.02797 217 187 26 4
6485 It's a good song...if you're into that sort of thing.You want to talk about it? 1.1567 0.02558 217 184 32 1
6486 OK, just one more song. Do you know the theme from "The Good Doctor?" 1.1567 0.02797 217 187 26 4
6487 And so dressing up as a cowboy and singing Johnny Cash, these things help with your invasive thoughts? 1.1566 0.02780 198 169 27 2
6488 When did you first start copying your mother ? 1.1565 0.02768 230 199 26 5
6489 They didn't publish that one, and then I wrote... 1.1565 0.02554 230 196 32 2
6490 Oh, give me a home . . . 1.1564 0.02681 211 180 29 2
6491 Yes, Don your identity is our secret and yes, I agree you are very very intelligent . 1.1562 0.03103 192 167 20 5
6492 Let me write that down as a starting point: 'It's Hard to Kiss the Lips at Night.' 1.1561 0.02809 205 176 26 3
6493 "Your fixation with 'Just strumming on the old banjo' needs to be updated to something more like 'Guitar Man' Earl." 1.1560 0.02785 218 188 26 4
6494 Lost your horse? I thought you said it was the lost chord. This changes every song. 1.1560 0.02629 218 186 30 2
6495 If it hits the Top 10 you won’t have to take out a loan to cover my rate. 1.1560 0.02785 218 188 26 4
6496 Stop playing the guitar! Start working! 1.1560 0.02785 218 188 26 4
6497 So, is this your typical Friday night?" 1.1558 0.02757 231 200 26 5
6498 Rick, I can see you're experiencing some side effects from those meds...I mean...you haven't shaved in weeks. 1.1557 0.02600 244 210 30 4
6499 "Nooo, it was my nose picking that led me to Banjo picking, which pulled me toward wanting to do some guitar picking, and it was that guitar my mom wouldn't buy me that led me to hating my maw! 1.1557 0.02788 244 213 24 7
6500 You're singing Always On My Mind when you come visit me partner! 1.1557 0.02751 212 182 27 3
6501 Somehow I think you're not being quite honest with me in your pervasive attempts to make rhymes. 1.1557 0.02831 212 183 25 4
6502 So when did this compulsion to put down your guitar and start writing down things people said begin? 1.1556 0.02656 225 193 29 3
6503 How long have you been having sinister thoughts? 1.1556 0.02656 225 193 29 3
6504 analyze this, I never miss, he sang over the roar of his .44. 1.1555 0.02769 238 207 25 6
6505 Too much Townes van Sandt. 1.1555 0.02638 238 205 29 4
6506 I feel like yodel boy might have stolen your mojo 1.1553 0.02880 206 178 24 4
6507 And how do you feel about the misfortunes of this long little doggie? 1.1553 0.02880 206 178 24 4
6508 I don't the guitar is the problem. 1.1553 0.03040 206 180 20 6
6509 I can only help you if you're totally honest with me. 1.1552 0.02534 232 198 32 2
6510 Wish I could help bring back memories that well. 1.1550 0.02844 200 172 25 3
6511 Don’t worry, it’s a common attachment! 1.1549 0.02739 213 183 27 3
6512 Tell me something, boy Aren't you tired tryin' to fill that void? 1.1549 0.02739 213 183 27 3
6513 I’m writing you a script for some of that salsa that used to depict people much like yourself in their television advertisements. 1.1549 0.03046 213 187 19 7
6514 Where never is heard a discouraging word ... 1.1549 0.02645 226 194 29 3
6515 So, sing me a rhyme for depressive... 1.1549 0.02645 226 194 29 3
6516 The tune’s fine. It’s the lyrics that need changing. 1.1549 0.02860 226 197 23 6
6517 Your time of life is depressing 1.1549 0.02790 226 196 25 5
6518 I think your Be is flat 1.1546 0.02800 194 166 26 2
6519 Just strum your innermost thoughts. We'll pick up the consultation from there. 1.1546 0.02699 207 177 28 2
6520 I think you are correct... that singing about your Mother issues is being very helpful in our sessions. 1.1545 0.02607 220 188 30 2
6521 My yee-haws have been yee-nahs lately. 1.1545 0.02685 220 189 28 3
6522 can you put in a line about mommy? 1.1545 0.02607 220 188 30 2
6523 Now that you've explained why you sat on a hot stove at your home, maybe we can explore your run-in with the herd of buffalo. 1.1545 0.02836 220 191 24 5
6524 Can you repeat the last chorus line 1.1545 0.02667 233 201 28 4
6525 Even MY dogs has flees...I'm sure yours had flees before, where the deer and the antelope play. 1.1543 0.03134 188 164 19 5
6526 So now you have this mad hankering to play the Ukulele. 1.1542 0.03002 201 175 21 5
6527 When I asked what you were feeling, I wasn't requesting a Nancy Sinatra song. 1.1542 0.02562 214 182 31 1
6528 Great to see you my brother Willie! How are things in the canibus tour? 1.1542 0.02807 214 185 25 4
6529 Ok, we won't talk about sex but it looks like you've got a hat on. 1.1542 0.02728 214 184 27 3
6530 And how do you feel about the Nashville killing off boots-and-saddles country music? 1.1542 0.02807 214 185 25 4
6531 Not so many trick-or-treaters this year. 1.1542 0.02778 227 197 25 5
6532 SO OEDIPUS, HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT GROWING UP TO BE A COWBOY. 1.1538 0.02750 221 191 26 4
6533 What if we used the lyric "you are the apple of my psycho-babble". 1.1538 0.02687 208 178 28 2
6534 Okay, now let's try that again in 4/4 time and 3/4 time... 1.1538 0.02854 208 180 24 4
6535 Perhaps you should start before 'Ghost Riders in the Sky' 1.1538 0.02772 208 179 26 3
6536 If you're that up tight, ask the cowboy to loosen your strings. 1.1538 0.02756 247 216 24 7
6537 I will write your thoughts. You have to give me credit. 1.1535 0.02549 228 195 31 2
6538 You insist that you used to be ranged, but now you are deranged. 1.1535 0.02696 228 197 27 4
6539 LeRoy, just because you grin when you pick doesn't make you weird. 1.1535 0.02795 215 186 25 4
6540 As your therapist, I must ask that you refrain from playing the guitar during the session, as I find it distracting. 1.1535 0.03019 215 189 19 7
6541 Come a Ti-Yi Yippy, Yippy Yah. 1.1535 0.02871 215 187 23 5
6542 Don't settle. 1.1535 0.02551 215 183 31 1
6543 I actually don't think we'd be an appealing duo in Branson, but tell me why you think so. 1.1535 0.02716 215 185 27 3
6544 You play out your unconscious and I translate. 1.1535 0.02904 202 175 23 4
6545 Let me see if I understand. You crossed the range a hundred times searching for the elephant, and now you're just a lonesome buckaroo. 1.1535 0.02818 202 174 25 3
6546 Ok, let's try this. Why don't you sing me your, 'I got the bearded man, tall hat wearing, cowboy blues.' 1.1535 0.03069 202 177 19 6
6547 This single is called "Ten Gallon Trauma." 1.1534 0.03027 189 164 21 4
6548 Well Bob, I don't think the outfit is going to help you find inspiration for new songs. 1.1532 0.02738 222 192 26 4
6549 Very impressive! C-sharp minor; I didn't think that was actually possible on the guitar! 1.1532 0.02738 222 192 26 4
6550 And so that' is when you told her a "A Star Is Born "? 1.1532 0.02663 222 191 28 3
6551 Honesty, I don't think your new version of Home on the Range will give you the acclaim you seek. 1.1531 0.02921 209 182 22 5
6552 Nelly ditched you and you take no responsibility. How's that working for you? 1.1531 0.03044 196 171 20 5
6553 Tell about your mother. 1.1531 0.02867 196 169 24 3
6554 Purple 1.1528 0.02824 229 200 23 6
6555 Medication has done all it can, the only thing that can save you now is your music. 1.1528 0.02783 216 187 25 4
6556 You say your mother didn't want you to choose the profession you chose, and wanted you to be a showgirl like her? 1.1528 0.02783 216 187 25 4
6557 Can’t you play anything but “I’ve got the old Freudian Blues?” And 1.1527 0.02974 203 177 21 5
6558 Can you sing Home on the range? 1.1527 0.02891 203 176 23 4
6559 So your horse can't stand your singing ""Yes, those were the good old days, but you need to move on" 1.1526 0.02720 190 162 27 1
6560 He seems to think he is a cowboy. 1.1526 0.02551 249 215 30 4
6561 Don't turn this session into a C&W song. 1.1525 0.02652 223 192 28 3
6562 The Patronizing Psychoanalyst: Not an I alcoholic, I see. Hmm that must've affected your singing career? 1.1525 0.02652 223 192 28 3
6563 I think we need to lose the “dumb bum” from the chorus 1.1525 0.02652 223 192 28 3
6564 Let’s work on getting a Stratocaster in time. 1.1525 0.02575 223 191 30 2
6565 I'm supposed to be helping you. Not vice versa. 1.1524 0.02747 210 181 26 3
6566 That rendition of "Home on the Range" grabs my pencil notes! 1.1524 0.02908 210 183 22 5
6567 Thanks for the wisdom, Lester. Use the rear exit--I gotta get back to work. 1.1524 0.02908 210 183 22 5
6568 Being unable to place music under the reductionstic, mechanistic psychoanalytic microscope, I will have to charge you double for this session. 1.1523 0.02853 197 170 24 3
6569 It's okay to wear clothes. Clean clothes. 1.1523 0.02452 243 208 33 2
6570 I don't mean to be rude sir,but could you please take off your hat. 1.1522 0.02813 230 201 23 6
6571 The boots and guitar were a stretch but the dog and the pickup will have to remain as service objects in absentia. 1.1520 0.02792 204 176 25 3
6572 And we he says, “I know you like being picked on,” how does than make you feel? 1.1520 0.02792 204 176 25 3
6573 Your audience only appears to be small because you're looking down on it from above. 1.1520 0.02960 204 178 21 5
6574 while "left handed cowbalism" is not common,it appears to have just ridden up 1.1520 0.02704 204 175 27 2
6575 So, when you visited this lone prairie place, how did your fear of being buried there affect your music? 1.1518 0.03088 191 167 19 5
6576 Same old tune but you thought you'd play it this time. Why do you think you're doing that? 1.1518 0.02641 224 193 28 3
6577 Ok, Alf, so tell me how you feel the strum und drang of the business affected your dream of opera. 1.1517 0.02816 211 183 24 4
6578 By the way, did you copy write that song? 1.1517 0.02735 211 182 26 3
6579 Tell me more about Old Dog Tray. 1.1517 0.02895 211 184 22 5
6580 Knock it off! Nobody cares about what happened when you were knee high to a grasshopper - not even roaming buffalo! 1.1517 0.02651 211 181 28 2
6581 You say you’ve been played all these years. How does that make you feel? 1.1517 0.02895 211 184 22 5
6582 Again with the Chair Guitar? 1.1515 0.02592 231 199 29 3
6583 My diagnosis is WoodyGuthrieitis. This rare condition is experienced by those who strongly feel Woody Guthrie is overrated. 1.1515 0.02592 231 199 29 3
6584 Lets recap; You first had an overwhelming desire to become a stockbroker while you were selling your herd of cattle." 1.1515 0.02555 198 168 30 0
6585 Let's start with the title of your latest album, Mamma Mia. 1.1515 0.02868 231 203 21 7
6586 So, it all started when you heard the words Justin and Bieber? 1.1514 0.02834 218 190 23 5
6587 You were drunk the day your mom got out of prison, and then she was run over by a train?...this is hard to believe!" (d.a.c. 1.1514 0.02834 218 190 23 5
6588 And why did you mother tell you Nashville starts with a G? 1.1511 0.02553 225 193 30 2
6589 If your story can only be told in song, sir, you need not do any improvisational instrumentals." 1.1510 0.02794 192 165 25 2
6590 A horse was in my dream. What does it mean? 1.1509 0.02959 212 186 20 6
6591 Your strumming is driving me crazy! 1.1509 0.02653 232 201 27 4
6592 It’s not that you’re left-handed. Buglers just get more acclaim than rhythm guitarists. 1.1509 0.02653 232 201 27 4
6593 Are you trying to drive me up the wall? 1.1505 0.02933 206 180 21 5
6594 Hey Pancho, Hey Cisco,yada yada yada....ya know it’s all copyright infringement right? 1.1504 0.02693 226 196 26 4
6595 Nigga Please" as a title, might not be appropriate. 1.1504 0.02904 226 199 20 7
6596 And how does 'llorar y llorar' make you feel? 1.1503 0.02780 193 166 25 2
6597 How is the “lonesome” stick working out for you? 1.1503 0.02780 193 166 25 2
6598 Oh shit, I'm back on the goddamn motherfuckin' road again...", so how does that make you feel 1.1502 0.02711 213 184 26 3
6599 And why does that make you feel irrelevant? 1.1502 0.02792 213 185 24 4
6600 It's the same ole tune driving me crazy 1.1502 0.02792 213 185 24 4
6601 So, you have been serenading, since when? 1.1502 0.02543 213 182 30 1
6602 And how does having your woman leave you and your dog dying make you feel? 1.1502 0.02642 233 202 27 4
6603 So what you're saying is that you just can't wait to get on the road again, because you love makin' music with your friends? Is that correct, Willie? 1.1500 0.02810 220 192 23 5
6604 We're still missing the "Tiny Desk" in the shot... 1.1500 0.02813 200 173 24 3
6605 It's a case of the "Long Gone Lonesome Blues." 1.1500 0.02735 220 191 25 4
6606 I detect an angry Aeolian mode, which may be caused by a lack of Greek food in your diet. 1.1498 0.02455 227 194 32 1
6607 I can tell you that the "cow fart" song stinks as bad as you do! 1.1498 0.02755 207 179 25 3
6608 John, this is taking forever. Maybe we should get Ringo and George to help us finish this one. You heard Yoko say she wanted you home by 1972. 1.1498 0.02755 207 179 25 3
6609 After 15 years without a psychiatric cure, may I recommend a trip to Lourdes OR this guitar? 1.1498 0.02755 207 179 25 3
6610 So, tell me more about your home-on-the-range-life? 1.1498 0.02668 207 178 27 2
6611 Even if the Coens wrote the ballad for you, Mr. Scruggs, I wouldn't recommend singing it in public? 1.1497 0.03024 187 163 20 4
6612 When did you start to feel like you were fused to your guitar? 1.1495 0.02857 214 187 22 5
6613 I guess you've taken my advice to heart..... music ,indeed, is a great form of therapy" 1.1495 0.02669 194 166 27 1
6614 Has your love of it been consummated? 1.1494 0.02650 241 210 26 5
6615 Don't you see the dichotomy of your other personality playing heavy metal right handed? 1.1493 0.02800 201 174 24 3
6616 If you don't stop singing your troubles, I'm going to mosey out of here. 1.1490 0.02656 208 179 27 2
6617 Sorry, but what came before 'Crop in the field... 1.1490 0.02567 208 178 29 1
6618 well ,willie i think all that weed is..... giving you anxiety issues. but on the other hand that song does truly suck! 1.1488 0.02688 215 186 26 3
6619 Why are you here if you are insistent that you, "Should've been a Cowboy." 1.1488 0.02767 215 187 24 4
6620 Are you even listening!!!? 1.1488 0.02767 215 187 24 4
6621 Tell me more about that jukebox. 1.1488 0.02521 215 184 30 1
6622 Vat do these fences you are rejecting represent? Your mother, Mr. the Kid, naturlich! 1.1488 0.02767 215 187 24 4
6623 From this "dark" valley you soon be leaving 1.1486 0.02929 222 196 19 7
6624 Down the road to Hell there was a railroad track... 1.1486 0.02558 222 191 29 2
6625 I'll give you 10% off my fee if you sing a few bars of "Home, Home on the Couch" 1.1486 0.02714 249 219 23 7
6626 How come you always get to play the wandering muleteer? 1.1485 0.02605 202 173 28 1
6627 And what is your home address on Buffalo Run? 1.1485 0.02698 202 174 26 2
6628 Face it. A tall hat and guitar don't guarantee an Opre appearance. 1.1485 0.02587 229 198 28 3
6629 This could be a real hit, but you must tell us, please, what is Clementine's shoe size? 1.1485 0.02660 229 199 26 4
6630 Well let me put it this way, padner, your psyche started downhill when discovered you were lefthanded." 1.1483 0.02972 209 184 19 6
6631 You seem to have become acutely fixated upon what would appears to be, from point of view of a bystander, but a minor chord. 1.1483 0.02556 209 179 29 1
6632 Can you tell me exactly when this phase started? 1.1483 0.02679 236 206 25 5
6633 How does this one sound: 'I want a girl, just like the girl who married dear old d-a-a-d!' ? 1.1481 0.02899 189 164 22 3
6634 Let's get back to the flowers. You say *every* rose has its thorn... 1.1481 0.02423 216 184 32 0
6635 So my Poppa vas very stern, but my Momma, she vas very loving! Somehow I got mixed up in this whole verkofta bizness! I vish I had left schkool ven I could have! 1.1481 0.02755 216 188 24 4
6636 I’m not depressed. Just listen to this song I wrote. 1.1480 0.03014 196 172 19 5
6637 So...what are we looking at? 1.1478 0.02861 203 177 22 4
6638 You and I, we ought to make some effort to build our digital fluency. 1.1478 0.02861 203 177 22 4
6639 WELL, DOC, I CAN'T SEEM TO GET RID OF THE SCREECHING NOISE IN MY HEAD. 1.1478 0.02775 203 176 24 3
6640 Your compulsion is starting to drive us both crazy! 1.1478 0.02685 203 175 26 2
6641 Ok then. How did you get along with your 'wandering star'? 1.1478 0.02775 203 176 24 3
6642 Ah, now I see. Yes, we can call this “directed prattle.” 1.1476 0.02633 210 181 27 2
6643 Man, I love me some good finger-pickin'. 1.1476 0.02881 210 184 21 5
6644 I really worry that your music slays them. 1.1476 0.02801 210 183 23 4
6645 And this is your usual practice after a sarsaparilla, you say? 1.1476 0.02718 210 182 25 3
6646 Dr Wise, you are getting the better end of this barter. These songs are gold! 1.1475 0.02419 244 210 32 2
6647 So, let me get this straight... “Beef is what’s NOT for dinner?! 1.1475 0.02820 217 190 22 5
6648 So how did you react when you found out that the “yip-ee-ay” referred to city people? 1.1475 0.02820 217 190 22 5
6649 Being sinister is not a bad thing. 1.1474 0.02446 251 217 31 3
6650 I get you are a singer, but, I really need here it from you and not your songs. 1.1474 0.03071 190 167 18 5
6651 She’s lost and gone forever, Billy Bob. Mandarin, on the other hand, now, she seems great. 1.1474 0.02979 190 166 20 4
6652 To recap: "Your Union Job as Troubadour at the Pearly Gates was terminated without notice, and the surveillance video footage of you on Cloud Nine being mistreated by Union Leaders, must be taken into evidence!" 1.1474 0.02684 190 163 26 1
6653 That’s right, just like on the range, you’ll seldom hear a discouraging word from me, either-now, what’s eatin’ at you?? 1.1472 0.02631 197 169 27 1
6654 You need a change. How 'bout the blues? Wanna drink? 1.1471 0.02848 204 178 22 4
6655 Sing your sorrows away. 1.1471 0.02848 204 178 22 4
6656 Tell me something, boy Aren't you tired tryin' to fill that void? Or do you need more? Ain't it hard keeping it so hardcore? 1.1469 0.02545 245 213 28 4
6657 So, what was your uncle doing when she died? 1.1469 0.02868 211 185 21 5
6658 Well, I must say, you're showing a strong reluctance in facing reality. First you say you can't seem to find an acceptable retirement home and then you complain that none of them have any roaming buffalo. 1.1469 0.02534 211 181 29 1
6659 Yee— and make sure you’re getting this— haw. 1.1468 0.02732 218 190 24 4
6660 Is it harder to play the guitar left handed? 1.1468 0.02808 218 191 22 5
6661 First off, put that Goddamn banjo down and listen up! 1.1468 0.02955 218 193 18 7
6662 Have you got a broken string? 1.1468 0.02653 218 189 26 3
6663 Clearly, you're a little too relaxed. 1.1468 0.02732 218 190 24 4
6664 Okay, got it. Whoopie Ti Yi Yo (Git Along Little Dogies). 1.1468 0.02732 218 190 24 4
6665 Patient: Well, I guess you could say my heroes have always been cowboys Doctor: And they still are it seems 1.1468 0.02653 218 189 26 3
6666 Remember Memphis, the King has just left the building, where were you then? 1.1467 0.02752 225 197 23 5
6667 First it was the acoustical guitar... 1.1467 0.02823 225 198 21 6
6668 You keep saying yee-haw, but has anyone said haw-yee to you? 1.1466 0.02628 232 202 26 4
6669 Whoop-ee-ti-yi-o get along little doggies, You know that Wyoming will be your new home. Man Up -- You just have separation anxiety!!! 1.1465 0.02715 198 171 25 2
6670 The chorus is a bit depressing 1.1465 0.02715 198 171 25 2
6671 Orange?" Nothing? Okay, try "purple." Rhyme "purple," and you're on your way 1.1462 0.02610 212 183 27 2
6672 I’m writing this on a Staff right 1.1462 0.02694 212 184 25 3
6673 So... how Long has it been, since You were Down on the Range? J.K. Fuller, Genoa, N 1.1461 0.02720 219 191 24 4
6674 Maybe your should think about reframing that "Bury Me Beneath the Willow" song. 1.1461 0.02655 178 152 26 0
6675 Where did you park your horse? 1.1460 0.02436 226 194 31 1
6676 I'm going to cry. 1.1459 0.03021 185 162 19 4
6677 Home on the range, where the psychiatrists and psychologists analze. 1.1459 0.02546 233 202 28 3
6678 I believe we're on the edge of a breakthrough; combining music therapy with couples counseling. 1.1459 0.02546 233 202 28 3
6679 Ever consider switching from Blues to something more upbeat, like Jazz or Hip Hop? 1.1457 0.02607 199 171 27 1
6680 Yes, they are your words in this Country song but I wrote it down so I want royalties 1.1456 0.02822 206 180 22 4
6681 Instead of the Blues, try a little Disco. 1.1455 0.02709 220 192 24 4
6682 So sing to me how you feel about that 1.1455 0.02631 220 191 26 3
6683 But if we persist I'm sure Beyoncé will agree to duet with you. Time's up. See you next week. 1.1455 0.02382 220 188 32 0
6684 . . .in trouble plenty" is not the lyric from "The Streets of Laredo" . Playing the song in a minor key just doesn't change that 1.1454 0.02729 227 199 23 5
6685 I just wanted to take another look at her. 1.1454 0.02505 227 196 29 2
6686 When my old gray horse left me I turned to writing songs about a different shade of horse. I sold the book rights. 1.1449 0.02637 207 179 26 2
6687 So, the difference between western and country is that you've been lonesome since your horse died? 1.1449 0.02809 207 181 22 4
6688 The secrets inside this hat could fill a factory farm 1.1449 0.02724 207 180 24 3
6689 So you were walking the streets. Why was that? And what were your feelings for that poor cowboy? 1.1449 0.02809 207 181 22 4
6690 I just want to write something the kids will dance to! 1.1449 0.02752 214 187 23 4
6691 Thanks, Doctor, for agreeing to let me do therapy this way. 1.1449 0.02671 214 186 25 3
6692 So is this old cowpoke going to be a happy bloke or keep singing the trail rider blues? 1.1449 0.02671 214 186 25 3
6693 For how long have you been going steady with your guitar? 1.1447 0.02646 228 199 25 4
6694 So you are a writer, folk singer and .... 1.1447 0.02495 228 197 29 2
6695 Country Music’s one hit wonders “Dr. Allen and Ten Gallon.” 1.1447 0.02666 235 206 24 5
6696 You lost your dog, your truck...and then your mother said Rex always rhymed with sex? 1.1443 0.02829 194 169 22 3
6697 Rejected by the Grand ol' Opry. How did you feel? 1.1443 0.02530 194 166 28 0
6698 So what do when you’re on the porch 1.1443 0.02677 201 174 25 2
6699 Yippi-i-o-ki-a to you too, my younger self! And grow up while you're at it! 1.1442 0.02797 208 182 22 4
6700 Don't blame me because your farm hired a HR executive and they send you here. 1.1442 0.02576 215 186 27 2
6701 You are a cowboy and I am a psychoanalyst. 1.1442 0.02740 215 188 23 4
6702 Can you play Psycho -the-rapist 1.1442 0.02818 215 189 21 5
6703 So, you think the Naked Cowboy stole your Schlick... 1.1442 0.02659 215 187 25 3
6704 You're hiding your wife in your basement until she leaves, is this correct? 1.1442 0.02659 215 187 25 3
6705 So, your anger toward your mama began after Waylon, Willie and the boys told you that as a baby you grew up to be a cowboy? 1.1442 0.02818 215 189 21 5
6706 And you say your wife got fed up with all those animals playing in the house? 1.1441 0.02529 222 192 28 2
6707 Mr. Montana, I must remind you that I don't "comprende" yodel. 1.1441 0.02609 222 193 26 3
6708 So you want the song to be about your guitar, huh? Why don't we start with how it makes you feel.... 1.1441 0.02516 236 205 28 3
6709 Money buys your audience. 1.1436 0.02907 195 171 20 4
6710 The inner critic is a destructive force, it's true, but let's focus on what the rest of the choir actually said, Mrs Merrywhistle 1.1436 0.02756 202 176 23 3
6711 I left my heart in San Francisco 1.1436 0.03012 202 179 17 6
6712 OK, so now tell me about your relationship but not in a country western song. 1.1435 0.02614 209 181 26 2
6713 Wonderwall...? 1.1435 0.02784 209 183 22 4
6714 Are your dreams vivid? 1.1435 0.02479 216 186 29 1
6715 You ever consider mining for Bitcoin? 1.1435 0.02647 216 188 25 3
6716 You pull the strings and I’ll pluck’em! 1.1435 0.02437 223 192 30 1
6717 Yes, change is tough. But think about current amenities, like therapy. 1.1429 0.02554 217 188 27 2
6718 We've made good progress on the waking process, but we really need to move on to how you are feeling at other times of the day 1.1429 0.02764 189 164 23 2
6719 Penis! 1.1429 0.03109 175 154 17 4
6720 No , Bernie, you are not Tex or Jose or .... 1.1429 0.02998 203 180 17 6
6721 I told you the kleptomania would return if you quit therapy 1.1429 0.02701 238 210 22 6
6722 so you can't stop strumming through life? 1.1429 0.02566 238 208 26 4
6723 Like Willie says..."Still crazy, after all these years." And the doc said..."Yeah, but it works for him. Lets see what we can do for you." 1.1429 0.02684 231 203 23 5
6724 Twang, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, twang, twang, twang." 1.1423 0.02469 253 221 28 4
6725 Und vie dunt you like zee vomen’s schprinklemocker? 1.1423 0.02376 246 213 31 2
6726 If I’m playing the part of the psychiatrist in today’s session, who are you supposed to be...Chris Stapleton? 1.1423 0.02486 239 208 28 3
6727 Chinny. Chin. Chin. - so, how did that make you feel? 1.1422 0.02455 232 201 29 2
6728 Perhaps you think about opening with a song other than “Another Brick in the Wall”? 1.1422 0.02676 211 184 24 3
6729 How about a little Vienna Waltz? 1.1422 0.02641 204 177 25 2
6730 Don't Worry. Perry Como won't hold it against you 1.1422 0.02731 204 178 23 3
6731 Just because you're in love with that guitar does not mean that you can fuck it right in front of me 1.1422 0.02902 204 180 19 5
6732 A-Hankering to do some picking again 1.1421 0.02880 197 173 20 4
6733 So it was slim pick'ins that finally decided your destiny? 1.1421 0.02694 197 171 24 2
6734 Sure, you can sing a ballad that tells of your love in the Ole' West. 1.1421 0.02788 197 172 22 3
6735 Stop singing, I can't diagnose your guitar! 1.1421 0.02694 197 171 24 2
6736 So Doc, why do I fall asleep every time I try and count my past lovers? 1.1421 0.02880 197 173 20 4
6737 You’re completely sure that singing one of your ‘gosh-darn fantastic country melodies’ is going to help you through the loss of your brother? 1.1417 0.02680 240 212 22 6
6738 By employing the term 'don't let', are you insinuating that you attribute your fate to your mother's leniency? 1.1416 0.02407 226 195 30 1
6739 I'm tellin' ya, it's that blues music. 1.1416 0.02532 219 190 27 2
6740 Dude, I feel all walled in on my border. 1.1415 0.02827 212 187 20 5
6741 This is not what I expected for Date Night. 1.1415 0.02579 212 184 26 2
6742 Is there a rocking horse? 1.1415 0.02889 205 181 19 5
6743 Let's talk about these attachment issues to your guitar 1.1414 0.02866 198 174 20 4
6744 No, no, We are talking about Storm and Stress 1.1413 0.02796 184 160 22 2
6745 So, your billy goat is the butt of your songs. 1.1410 0.02477 227 197 28 2
6746 Could it be the chorus you heard from the little dogies was actcually 'Mooing,' instead? 1.1410 0.02555 227 198 26 3
6747 So, did your mother call you, 'Oh, baby, baby,'? 1.1409 0.02832 220 195 19 6
6748 You don't need me. You need another instrument." "You don't need me. You need another instrument." 1.1408 0.02653 213 186 24 3
6749 So in this dream you’re driving down country roads in a pickup truck, huh. Perhaps this symbolizes compartmentalization within your subconscious. How does that make you feel? 1.1408 0.02653 213 186 24 3
6750 do you think this interdisciplinary approach is just a fad? 1.1408 0.02568 213 185 26 2
6751 [‘nuff said] 1.1408 0.02653 213 186 24 3
6752 Ok, Jingle Reinhart......shoot. 1.1408 0.02617 206 179 25 2
6753 Sigmund Freud didn't think of this! 1.1408 0.02792 206 181 21 4
6754 I just love your beautiful smile when you playing this song. 1.1407 0.02762 199 174 22 3
6755 And so did you decide to up music before or after you shot old Bill? 1.1407 0.02852 199 175 20 4
6756 What makes you think blues is underappreciated, Mr. Hillbilly? 1.1405 0.02458 242 211 28 3
6757 Okay Arthur, and how much time have you spent playing Red Dead Redemption? 1.1404 0.02730 178 154 23 1
6758 It's not your fault the adjectives 'Good' and 'Bad' had already been taken. 1.1404 0.02692 228 201 22 5
6759 And then Texas Jack rode off into the sunset... Towards Dr. Steinberg's office. 1.1404 0.02544 228 199 26 3
6760 What key, what key? 1.1402 0.02557 214 186 26 2
6761 Could you please pluck a happier tune? 1.1401 0.02605 207 180 25 2
6762 You're all right! How am I? 1.1401 0.02943 207 184 17 6
6763 when you say inseparable, do you mean when going to the bathroom, too? 1.1401 0.02943 207 184 17 6
6764 When did you first sing your laments. 1.1400 0.02656 200 174 24 2
6765 You haven't practiced the chords 1.1400 0.02474 250 219 27 4
6766 It's like I used to say to Janice, "Audiences like their blues singers to be miserable." 1.1400 0.02749 200 175 22 3
6767 Well, if you did come back as Hank Williams, my advice is to avoid riding in back seats. 1.1399 0.02609 193 167 25 1
6768 I can assure you the shrink-effect only works from the neck up. So you can put the guitar down now. 1.1399 0.02710 193 168 23 2
6769 I think we all expected more from Snoop Lion. 1.1398 0.02490 236 206 27 3
6770 This song will be a hit! 1.1397 0.02681 229 202 22 5
6771 Enough about your horse! Let’s talk about it’s dam. 1.1397 0.02534 229 200 26 3
6772 Myrtle Sue, my wife's so homely. And wonders why she is so lonely ... ah ah. Say, Doc, that's a good start. But change from F Flat to D Minor. 1.1397 0.02457 229 199 28 2
6773 Just me and my alter ego. 1.1396 0.02734 222 196 21 5
6774 But I thought that "Pig Pen" Ron McKernan played the organ for the Grateful Dead? 1.1395 0.02630 215 188 24 3
6775 Ai ai ai ai ... porque cantando me alegro even though you're pretty dull, doctor. 1.1394 0.02849 208 184 19 5
6776 You think you're off key, but in your head it is actually your mother crooning to you. 1.1394 0.02767 208 183 21 4
6777 Let me guess in a previous life you were a rock star. 1.1394 0.02767 208 183 21 4
6778 And have you always wanted to be known as "El Guitarrista"? 1.1389 0.02618 216 189 24 3
6779 OK, Jose, how about "Guantanamera" instead ? 1.1389 0.02854 216 192 18 6
6780 That song really takes me back. Would you please play "How much is that doggie in the window" for me. 1.1389 0.02854 216 192 18 6
6781 IWith all due respect to Dr. Flanders, I need to say that I'm NOT into music therapy 1.1389 0.02535 216 188 26 2
6782 So you can’t stop writing songs about not needing no stinking badge? 1.1385 0.02514 231 202 26 3
6783 That played, can you say more about your mandolin? 1.1385 0.02729 231 205 20 6
6784 Brave New World 1.1384 0.02784 224 199 19 6
6785 ...you might want to rethink your MAGA tour 1.1384 0.02711 224 198 21 5
6786 tell me about your stinking road manager again. 1.1382 0.02687 217 191 22 4
6787 I already consulted with that artist . . Try again, in your own words. 1.1382 0.02524 217 189 26 2
6788 Now those lyrics about chewing gum on the bedpost, you say they came to you after an incident where you had to cut off all you facial hair? 1.1382 0.02524 217 189 26 2
6789 Do you know the words to "Marry Me Not, I'm Solitary"? 1.1379 0.02711 203 178 22 3
6790 I could cure your left handednes but then you would no longer stay at the top of the charts Cowboy. 1.1378 0.02388 225 195 29 1
6791 So tell me, which Old Habits do you need to break today? 1.1378 0.02469 225 196 27 2
6792 So, how long have you been fixated on the neurobiology of music? 1.1378 0.02768 196 172 21 3
6793 But my dear sir, it is clearly a case of melophobia. 1.1376 0.02829 218 194 18 6
6794 Oh you play guitar holy shit that's sooooo interesting. 1.1376 0.02427 218 189 28 1
6795 I am afraid to tell you the next World Cup has nothing to do with ANY guitar! 1.1372 0.02538 226 198 25 3
6796 It's always "yee-haw", and never "ye-h'all-right?" 1.1372 0.02614 226 199 23 4
6797 You say you can't stop playing "Take Me Back To The Chicken Ranch" over and over?" 1.1371 0.02469 248 218 26 4
6798 But no! My parents would not let me get close to a harmonica. 1.1371 0.02333 248 216 30 2
6799 CAN'T YOU SING SOMETHING MORE UPBEAT? 1.1371 0.02847 197 174 19 4
6800 It’s not the end of the world when you don’t get any chair turns! 1.1370 0.02585 219 192 24 3
6801 The valley can't really smile - it's just a pleasant thought.... 1.1370 0.02502 219 191 26 2
6802 So you feel that being lonesome has led to your compulsive gambling... 1.1368 0.02799 212 188 19 5
6803 So you're The Old Man and the Guitar???? 1.1368 0.02548 212 185 25 2
6804 How did you feel after you did Move It On Over? 1.1368 0.02331 234 203 30 1
6805 So, you're a lone cowhand from the Rio Grande? 1.1366 0.02596 205 179 24 2
6806 Da doo run run run da doo run run 1.1366 0.02749 227 202 19 6
6807 I'll sing the first part and spur of the moment you come up with a catchy hook. 1.1366 0.02449 227 198 27 2
6808 It’s sounding flat 1.1365 0.02324 249 217 30 2
6809 And how does playing the same bluesy tune make you feel? 1.1364 0.02646 198 173 23 2
6810 But then WE created plastic. 1.1364 0.02573 220 193 24 3
6811 la cu-ca-ra-cha, la cu-ca-ra-cha... 1.1364 0.02742 198 174 21 3
6812 So I can see right away your a workaholic. 1.1362 0.02685 235 209 20 6
6813 Wasn't John Denver right handed? 1.1362 0.02448 213 185 27 1
6814 Could you sing a little "Home on the Range" ? 1.1362 0.02536 213 186 25 2
6815 Did you say “Smokey” or “dogie”? 1.1362 0.02536 213 186 25 2
6816 OK, OK, you can sing it...but only in the key of G. 1.1360 0.02358 228 198 29 1
6817 From thirty thousand feet above above the desert floor, I see something is dreadfully wrong for I feel this chick Felina hugging me and telling me goodbye. 1.1360 0.02517 228 200 25 3
6818 I'd blame it all on your roots. You grew up in boots. 1.1359 0.02863 184 162 19 3
6819 Freud said there's a little truth in our humor but not music! 1.1358 0.02492 243 214 25 4
6820 Blame it all on my roots... 1.1357 0.02481 221 193 26 2
6821 So I guess it all started with the Sundance kid.... 1.1357 0.02729 199 175 21 3
6822 A long, long, time ago, I can still remember how my mama used to make me cry. 1.1355 0.02437 214 186 27 1
6823 So, it all started in the shower? 1.1355 0.02694 214 189 21 4
6824 Then he smashed my guitar and said 'Get a decent job, young man'. 1.1354 0.02883 192 170 18 4
6825 Guitar lessons. Well, that's a new item we can mull and re-mull. How do you feel about strumming? 1.1354 0.02349 229 199 29 1
6826 Have you considered a Crossover? 1.1354 0.02266 229 198 31 0
6827 Ever since the web killed print, your coping strategy has hurled you into an identity crisis, pandering to polarized politics at the expense of the magazine's great cartoon tradition. Or was Mankoff just that much better? You sell out. 1.1353 0.02884 170 149 19 2
6828 I always thought you were the star on "Prairie Home Companion" 1.1352 0.02482 244 215 25 4
6829 And tell Mom I’ll bring the soufflé next time, not sure where she was going with the jalapeños 1.1351 0.02471 222 194 26 2
6830 Wow, another one. I didn’t know Britney Spears’ had so many songs. 1.1351 0.02630 222 196 22 4
6831 But have you really expressed to your agent why Cardi B is such an inspiration for this next album? 1.1350 0.02526 237 209 24 4
6832 Let's get in touch with your inner child." 1.1350 0.02716 200 176 21 3
6833 So...you can't sing the blues the way you used to since the dust Pancho bit ended up in your mouth? 1.1349 0.02620 252 225 20 7
6834 And how do you feel about the rejection you experience when trying to pay your saloon tab with Pachelbel’s Canon? 1.1346 0.02468 208 181 26 1
6835 I believe you need another approach for your subway cowboy serenading. Perhaps a different theme; I would go with Rapper Roy instead of Amarillo Slim and maybe tossing the guitar and trying fitted designer clothes." 1.1346 0.02561 208 182 24 2
6836 What kind of beer do you give your horses? 1.1343 0.02504 216 189 25 2
6837 ‘...but my superego was supersized...’ Can we talk about that? 1.1340 0.02362 209 181 28 0
6838 It would appear you suffer from Hormone Derangement Syndrome. 1.1340 0.02549 209 183 24 2
6839 So the problem sounds to B-flat. 1.1340 0.02549 209 183 24 2
6840 So...your cow died because you said to her, "there are no Tibetan snow leopards in the Arizona desert, you idiot. It's just one of those bushy tumbly things", you said. 1.1339 0.02608 224 198 22 4
6841 Hey there, Delilah... What's it like in New York city... 1.1339 0.02367 224 195 28 1
6842 Why don't you sing the one about the 'Wide Open Spaces'. 1.1337 0.02781 202 179 19 4
6843 Slim, I feel "I'm An Old Cowhand On the Rio Grand" does not quite capture your essence. 1.1337 0.02501 202 176 25 1
6844 Well Kenny, looking back at my notes I can confidently say that this one is going to be in the top 10 on the country billboards. 1.1336 0.02658 217 192 21 4
6845 Why do you feel you need a disguise for your CMT job interview Ms. Loughlin? 1.1336 0.02493 217 190 25 2
6846 Okay; so you come from Alabama with a banjo on your knee? That’s not a banjo! 1.1333 0.02626 210 185 22 3
6847 On which line do you feel a lack of appreciation? 1.1333 0.02440 225 197 26 2
6848 let me sing you a song of my sorrows, pappy was a rolling stone wherever he hung his hat was his home and when he died .... 1.1333 0.02711 210 186 20 4
6849 Your in the chair next to the man in the chair because I actually write the songs Lefty! 1.1333 0.02648 195 171 22 2
6850 What do you think is the reason for your success with personal relationships that is impeding you professionally? 1.1330 0.02489 203 177 25 1
6851 My subconscious is filled with melodies 1.1330 0.02585 203 178 23 2
6852 If you can't believe the lyric 'Are you sure Hank done it this way,' how about watching a video? 1.1330 0.02585 203 178 23 2
6853 Why don’t I play you a song I wrote about heartbreak as payment, doc? Sure, but I plan to bill you for that. 1.1327 0.02918 196 175 16 5
6854 Doctor say a word any word so that I may start a song. Ok, Tec as long as you say a word any word so I may get into your head. 1.1324 0.02555 219 193 23 3
6855 If you're taking requests, how about "Home on the Range"? 1.1324 0.02555 219 193 23 3
6856 Richard, which do you prefer... W-Y-O-M-I-N-G or O=K=L-A-H-O-M-A ? 1.1324 0.02635 219 194 21 4
6857 I can't focus on your problems while you are trying to play that stupid guitar 1.1323 0.02792 189 167 19 3
6858 please play! I will hire you if you give me the influence of starting my new novel. 1.1322 0.02576 227 201 22 4
6859 You’ve changed your presentation 1.1321 0.02425 212 185 26 1
6860 It's probably time to get up and feed your horse..." #ASPCA #bekindtoanimals #cowboyballadsareoverrated 1.1318 0.02624 220 195 21 4
6861 I wanna go ho oh ome...ho oh ome." 1.1318 0.02461 220 193 25 2
6862 Take of your G' Damn Hat! 1.1317 0.02467 205 179 25 1
6863 How about if I see the floor that needs sweeping while you gently weep?” 1.1316 0.02410 228 200 26 2
6864 That's not something I can 'check yes or no' to, but let's explore it." Staci Simonton, Mill Valley, C 1.1316 0.02459 190 165 25 0
6865 Can you play Thompson Twins-Doctor, Doctor? 1.1313 0.02611 198 174 22 2
6866 Frank told me to ask you: "When the deer and the antelope still play, how do you feel about your home on a cloudy day?" 1.1312 0.02533 221 195 23 3
6867 Have you tried singing into an oven mit? 1.1309 0.02862 191 170 17 4
6868 Tell me about your childhood Billy 1.1308 0.02404 214 187 26 1
6869 I don't think that should be the second verse of your ballad. 1.1307 0.02598 199 175 22 2
6870 Walking on, walking on broken glass. 1.1307 0.02598 199 175 22 2
6871 Please tell me, what music do you play again? 1.1307 0.02499 199 174 24 1
6872 You leave for your first trip west of the Hudson soon. Sing me about your new life. 1.1304 0.02629 207 183 21 3
6873 Can you play be bop changes 1.1304 0.02606 184 161 22 1
6874 Now, how often do you go down to the Honky Tonk? 1.1303 0.02343 238 209 27 2
6875 I think the best way to recover your self-esteem is to take a shot at a more manly occupation, Mr. Cassidy. 1.1302 0.02732 215 192 18 5
6876 Can you tell me when you were convinced you can play pro ball for the Yankees? 1.1301 0.02369 246 217 26 3
6877 I see. But to clarify, please, « Strung out, » you say, or « Strung along? » 1.1300 0.02774 200 178 18 4
6878 How do they expect us develop a new hobby at forty? Bad music doesn't kill as efficiently as a gun! 1.1299 0.02678 231 207 18 6
6879 Strum dumb or Dumb strummer? 1.1295 0.02501 224 198 23 3
6880 What do you think my problem is! 1.1295 0.02335 224 196 27 1
6881 Sorry but I am not into Country nowadays 1.1295 0.02656 224 200 19 5
6882 So you have had restlessness, anxiety, and generalized myalgia during the past three days, and you have not slept for the past two days. I think we should raise up our glasses against evil forces singing whiskey for my men, beer for my horses. 1.1295 0.02580 224 199 21 4
6883 And you were trying to glue what? 1.1294 0.02761 201 179 18 4
6884 Don't ever try to play county-western themes left-handedly. 1.1294 0.02476 201 176 24 1
6885 Must you play the same old song five times a week 10 years in a row? Irina Torrey, San Francisco 1.1293 0.02371 232 204 26 2
6886 And how do you feel about your life on the homested 1.1292 0.02326 209 182 27 0
6887 I am describing you as fat redhead. 1.1292 0.02858 209 188 15 6
6888 And, how long have you been depressed about not becoming a celebrity? 1.1292 0.02606 209 185 21 3
6889 No, you're not pickin'-n-grinin'. Its more like a crawl and a drawl. No wonder you have issues... 1.1290 0.02546 217 192 22 3
6890 And how does that make you feel,” asked Cowboy Bill’s therapist as part of his sessions to learn how to write more sensitive country ballads. 1.1287 0.02657 202 179 20 3
6891 What do you mean when you say,"I'm plucking the strings of Her Heart?" 1.1287 0.02657 202 179 20 3
6892 You need to let go of Schoolhouse Rock rejecting your song about your 37.8541 liter hat. 1.1284 0.02697 218 195 18 5
6893 I lit up from Reno I was trailed by twenty hounds Didn't get to sleep that night Till the morning came around 1.1283 0.02677 187 165 20 2
6894 Pardner...don't call me Sigmund, call me Tex 1.1282 0.02711 195 173 19 3
6895 In case you didn’t know babe I’m crazy ‘bout you. 1.1281 0.02550 203 179 22 2
6896 Do not beg me to sound like Bradley Cooper. 1.1278 0.02390 227 200 25 2
6897 Okay, enough about me. What do YOU think of me..? 1.1277 0.02663 188 166 20 2
6898 I've been leading Old Dan for a mighty long time...I'm thinkin' it's about time he starts leading me. 1.1277 0.02663 188 166 20 2
6899 I don't know. Do YOU think your cover of "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry" is too sentimental 1.1275 0.02442 204 179 24 1
6900 I've just been feeling lone lately 1.1274 0.02390 212 186 25 1
6901 You speak what's ailing yer while I strum this here guitar" 1.1273 0.02513 220 195 22 3
6902 Could the fact that you are currently being held by a bearded bull in boots explain your musicological condition? 1.1273 0.02513 220 195 22 3
6903 sing me a song of a lad that is gone 1.1272 0.02537 228 203 21 4
6904 IF I HEARD YOU RIGHT, WAS THAT "GIVE ME A HOME WHERE THE BUFFALO ROAM?" 1.1268 0.02471 213 188 23 2
6905 So you're saying that it was in the West Texas city of El Paso that you first heard this song long ago about a Texas cowboy, and a girl, and a little place called Rosa's. Fascinating. Please continue." Dennis Kaplan, Avon, C 1.1267 0.02333 221 194 26 1
6906 So you believe ' Home on the Range' will go over big in Nashville." 1.1263 0.02574 198 175 21 2
6907 Your house was on a stove top? 1.1262 0.02515 206 182 22 2
6908 That was a wonderful ballad of your childhood. Can you tell me more about it in EDM? 1.1261 0.02323 222 195 26 1
6909 Can you play the tunes of my poem! 1.1261 0.02278 230 202 27 1
6910 LifeGoal = Roaming buffalo, deer and playful antelope. 1.1261 0.02278 230 202 27 1
6911 Have you ever thought you’re just a rip-off of samurais? 1.1256 0.02461 199 175 23 1
6912 Doc, let me strum a tune about my old Aunt Lilly. She had a penchant for eating frogs. 1.1256 0.02685 207 185 18 4
6913 And why did you marry Archi? 1.1256 0.02621 215 192 19 4
6914 Well, I guess I can put up with the Lady Gaga thing Doc, but they're drinkin up all the tequila. 1.1256 0.02359 215 189 25 1
6915 That may well be a catchy song title but,in accordance with your treatment, let's change it to 'Diagnosis of a Mental Illness Cowgirl'. 1.1255 0.02429 231 205 23 3
6916 I don't want to start out on a sour note, but I'm more of a classical music man. I never could get into Country and Western. 1.1255 0.02453 239 213 22 4
6917 Why don’t you tell me your most fervent desire. Oh give me a home.... 1.1250 0.02550 200 177 21 2
6918 Now, lets go back to when you were 5 years old. Could you play a note describing the emotions you felt on your first day of school? 1.1250 0.02550 200 177 21 2
6919 No, cowboy diplomacy is down the hall. 1.1250 0.02471 224 199 22 3
6920 Mine daughter Anna eez a beeg beleever een zees play therapee. 1.1250 0.02398 208 183 24 1
6921 Play me another tune, Jim, I love it when you strum. 1.1245 0.02385 249 222 23 4
6922 It reminds me of my mother. . . . 1.1245 0.02410 233 207 23 3
6923 Easier to play and divulge all the craziness in my life. 1.1244 0.02387 209 184 24 1
6924 This is how I solve my issues 1.1244 0.02634 201 179 19 3
6925 Music is fine..let´s try with the lyrics to help me heal you. 1.1239 0.02529 226 202 20 4
6926 Action...cut 1.1239 0.02529 226 202 20 4
6927 The song was nice, but I only accept payment in diamonds or gold. 1.1237 0.02480 194 171 22 1
6928 You seem mad at the countryside music. 1.1237 0.02687 194 173 18 3
6929 I'm not doing this just so you can put "Oedipal complex" in your next song. 1.1235 0.02793 170 151 17 2
6930 I'm a hilly-billy redneck rockstar Just a-strummin' on my old guitar. 1.1233 0.02359 227 201 24 2
6931 Before I could get there in my pickup truck, she got runned over by the train 1.1233 0.02669 227 205 16 6
6932 I love you too Maurice... 1.1233 0.02359 227 201 24 2
6933 What is it about the cassock you object to, Father? 1.1233 0.02576 219 196 19 4
6934 Sorry, I can't get you any of that crap back. 1.1233 0.02407 219 194 23 2
6935 Sorry, Jimmy Buffett already did that song. 1.1232 0.02549 211 188 20 3
6936 Play Wonderwall 1.1232 0.02701 203 182 17 4
6937 Band practice was better in the garage. 1.1228 0.02349 228 202 24 2
6938 Come and listen to my story about a man named Jed A poor mountaineer, barely kept his family fed... 1.1227 0.02722 220 199 15 6
6939 That's solid work Sam, but wait a minute, try this bit right after... 1.1225 0.02404 204 180 23 1
6940 Your unconscious desire to sleep with your saddle has made you fixate on the aural stage of your guitar. 1.1222 0.02553 221 198 19 4
6941 I'd rather play music than read books nerd. 1.1220 0.02393 205 181 23 1
6942 Oh bury meee, on the lonne prairiee... 1.1220 0.02244 246 218 26 2
6943 Play it again, Sam. I'm feeling the rapture - NOT! 1.1220 0.02316 246 219 24 3
6944 In my professional opinion, you're right, the world is shallow. That you've suddenly come to the conclusion it's sha-la-la-la-low is concerning. Let's unpack that a bit. 1.1218 0.02577 238 215 17 6
6945 When exactly did you stop associating home with 1.1215 0.02427 214 190 22 2
6946 Aren't you bothered by feeling committed to take your job with you everywhere, all the time? 1.1214 0.02382 206 182 23 1
6947 Your eccentricity stems from your sinister approach to life. 1.1214 0.02573 206 184 19 3
6948 Tell me, when did you first decide to become a left-handed justice? 1.1213 0.02353 239 213 23 3
6949 Therapist: "So Julio, what is the secret for being a novela guitar player?" Julio: "It depends, for me it's constant manicures" 1.1211 0.02451 223 199 21 3
6950 Quick Draw Billy Bob is an archetype. That’s something like archenemy, but without the skin-tight red suit. 1.1208 0.02268 240 213 25 2
6951 Strum strum strum so what loser tune you gonna play now? 1.1207 0.02311 232 206 24 2
6952 Don’t judge books by its covers ! 1.1205 0.02270 224 198 25 1
6953 I am so sorry "The Voice" did not turn a chair. Try Again 1.1204 0.02660 216 195 16 5
6954 Get along little doggie" is not helpful 1.1200 0.02304 200 176 24 0
6955 And what comes after 'She sold my pony to the rodeo'.? 1.1198 0.02395 217 193 22 2
6956 "Mommy said I was a good little player, and Mommy knows best!' 1.1198 0.02395 217 193 22 2
6957 "Freud, you are not Jimi Hendrix, but EGO tripping because of mistaken ID" 1.1197 0.02211 234 207 26 1
6958 How does it make you feel after two unsuccessful rodeo clowns? 1.1196 0.02446 209 186 21 2
6959 I feel D-flat minor. Please re-tune me to A-sharp major! 1.1189 0.02327 227 202 23 2
6960 So, tell me more about why you think you’re a reincarnated soldier at The Alamo in a sing song. 1.1187 0.02191 219 193 26 0
6961 I ate a one ton tomato keeps going around in my head.... 1.1187 0.02284 219 194 24 1
6962 Have you tried counter-conditioning to treat your claustrophobia? 1.1186 0.02352 236 211 22 3
6963 Yes, I have co-authored several of Willie Nelson's hits. Now pay attention to what I tell you!" 1.1186 0.02439 194 172 21 1
6964 That’s great news, Cecil Roy. You patched things up AND wrote her a mushy love song. Yep Doc, you healed me up good. I call it “You said you’d die for me, but yer still alive”... 1.1182 0.02450 220 197 20 3
6965 You haven't finished your ballad. 1.1182 0.02364 220 196 22 2
6966 It doesn't matter what I write as I'm not a man, and won't win the competition. 1.1179 0.02308 229 204 23 2
6967 Now I'm sorry to say this but I fail to see how saying "Gucci Gang" 48 times in a southern accent will help you improve your relationship with your father. 1.1176 0.02603 221 200 16 5
6968 Let's talk about your mother, Little Bo Peep. 1.1176 0.02265 221 196 24 1
6969 Pick them strings and yodel. 1.1176 0.02440 221 198 20 3
6970 List: milk Bread Eggs Song: I'm an old cow hand... 1.1176 0.02265 221 196 24 1
6971 you don’t say, I don’t say. 1.1171 0.02355 205 182 22 1
6972 Tell me: when was it you discovered your love of Marina and the Diamonds? 1.1168 0.02298 214 190 23 1
6973 Can you play Home on the Range? 1.1168 0.02482 214 192 19 3
6974 Subconsciously, your friends don't mind listening to you play unconsciously. 1.1166 0.02154 223 197 26 0
6975 Dr. Savinsky thought swapping places would loosen up Mr. Pinsbody. 1.1166 0.02501 223 201 18 4
6976 Homer, can you play "Git along Iddle Doggies? 1.1166 0.02334 223 199 22 2
6977 So this is how country songs begin!?! 1.1166 0.02419 223 200 20 3
6978 You're a great interior de-singer! I am starting to see your vision. 1.1165 0.02115 249 221 27 1
6979 My playing days are over but I can't seem to stop from playing the same song over and over again! 1.1161 0.02324 224 200 22 2
6980 Wow...I never noticed the emotional complexity in Lil Pump's lyrics until I heard that acoustic cover of "D Rose." It was beautiful. You've gotta get it onto YouTube immediately. 1.1159 0.02333 207 184 22 1
6981 No, I've heard that sad song before. How about a snappy rendition of "Jose' Cuervo, You Are A Friend of Mine" ? 1.1159 0.02188 233 207 25 1
6982 Your music and my lyrics from separate rooms next time, like Elton and Bernie. 1.1157 0.02297 242 217 22 3
6983 How does a rio grande compare to standard UWS therapy fees? 1.1154 0.02221 208 184 24 0
6984 Please Mr. Keith I You should of been a cowboy 1.1150 0.02305 226 202 22 2
6985 Santiago. Do you think the guitar keeps you sane? OK but does it keep you legal? 1.1150 0.02469 226 204 18 4
6986 Freudian psychoanalysis deals with the oral, the anal and the phallic. A redneck childhood retold in country music belongs on stage preferably at a honky tonk. 1.1149 0.02252 235 210 23 2
6987 Again I seem to have misplaced my notes on your heart, the “puree” setting, and so on. Can you repeat that? 1.1148 0.02503 209 188 18 3
6988 So what are your feeling about pop music? 1.1147 0.02350 218 195 21 2
6989 I'm afraid we have here a severe Wonderwall progression 1.1144 0.02462 201 180 19 2
6990 I'm an ole' cow hand from the Rio Grande. 1.1142 0.02154 219 194 25 0
6991 No, that I saw not what My Little Pony is. 1.1139 0.02450 202 181 19 2
6992 Your playing is so romantic that I think I am falling in love with you. 1.1137 0.02570 211 191 16 4
6993 And then it goes again and again... 1.1136 0.02418 220 198 19 3
6994 Well I tell you one thing, you're far from the shallow now my friend. Sajda Waite- NYC 1.1135 0.02276 229 205 22 2
6995 You keep mentioning a lonesome train whistle, but let’s explore whether that whistle might really be Cowboy Joe. 1.1134 0.02506 194 174 18 2
6996 How did you feel when she said you are a wretched guitar player? 1.1128 0.02493 195 175 18 2
6997 Willie Nelson? Not even clise! 1.1127 0.02428 204 183 19 2
6998 I still say you're not a blue-nosed gopher. 1.1122 0.02513 205 185 17 3
6999 I will just lay back and pick a tune on the gitar to express how I feel. Joe Pitts, Washington, DC 1.1121 0.02356 214 192 20 2
7000 Any chance you could turn down the ceiling fan? 1.1111 0.02426 216 195 18 3
7001 We do the psycho loco, and finally we knowko, that's what it's all about. 1.1111 0.02336 216 194 20 2
7002 Unfortunately that truly won't bring them back. 1.1111 0.02426 216 195 18 3
7003 hey are you holding? 1.1106 0.02438 226 205 17 4
7004 Was that an F sharp or a B minor? 1.1106 0.02383 208 187 19 2
7005 What's Spanish for 'bro'? 1.1105 0.02400 190 170 19 1
7006 Been workin' on this new song for weeks, but I just keep hittin' a wall with it. 1.1101 0.02222 218 195 22 1
7007 No need to repeat the chorus. Tick, tock, Johnnie Gitbox... 1.1100 0.02170 209 186 23 0
7008 So the candy deprivation due to hating the viola still haunts your dreams? 1.1096 0.02252 228 205 21 2
7009 Again, what are your singing as your response? 1.1095 0.02263 210 188 21 1
7010 You know doc that the cowboy hat is of Spaniard, ladino parentage. 1.1091 0.02295 220 198 20 2
7011 Pancho & Lefty...gram 1.1091 0.02295 220 198 20 2
7012 It 1.1091 0.02469 220 200 16 4
7013 Tell me about your mother—in rhapsodic form. 1.1088 0.02018 239 213 26 0
7014 Toodle ooh Buckaroo 1.1087 0.02769 184 168 12 4
7015 Tell me how you feel about their canceling your Broadway show. 1.1086 0.02285 221 199 20 2
7016 In the sha-sha-sha-ha-lo(wuh) 1.1083 0.02010 240 214 26 0
7017 Along came a beatnik swinging a chain zip down his zipper and out it came 3months later allwas well 6 months later started to swell,9months later out they came 3 little beatniks swinging on a chain 1.1082 0.02225 231 208 21 2
7018 Very nice. Now move right along... 1.1081 0.02276 222 200 20 2
7019 So... how does that make you feel? 1.1080 0.02480 176 158 17 1
7020 Why are you feeling blues? 1.1068 0.02264 206 185 20 1
7021 Okay...so you know and love everything about the ancient ‘Whoopie Ti-Yi-Yo’ mantra but yet you have no idea what meditation even is...well sir, I have to say, I’m completely stumped. 1.1065 0.02204 216 194 21 1
7022 Now, what do you play? 1.1055 0.02184 218 196 21 1
7023 Zo Eugene, " a mighty heard of red eyed cows," 1.1055 0.02087 237 213 23 1
7024 Bob's wind didn't get me an answer. So, Friend, here I am. 1.1050 0.02076 219 196 23 0
7025 Dangled up in blue doc” “I have heard of this before 1.1050 0.02393 200 181 17 2
7026 Ok now you say “on the road again “ They I say .. 1.1041 0.02250 221 200 19 2
7027 And this one, folks, is one of my favorites of James Taylor... ahem... ♪ ♫"There is a young cowboy, he lives on the range. His horse and his cattle are his only companions..." ♫ ♪ 1.1038 0.01972 260 234 25 1
7028 I do understand, but ‘Made in New York City’ isn’t the condiment end “. 1.1036 0.02415 222 203 15 4
7029 Analysis. Please access your previous configuration. 1.1036 0.02050 222 199 23 0
7030 Words and music by Wannabe Cowboy and Doc. 1.1036 0.02050 222 199 23 0
7031 Where the ATBs and MTBs play' works for me. 1.1030 0.01996 233 209 24 0
7032 Da-NA-na-NA-na. 1.1029 0.02348 204 185 17 2
7033 Mr. Smith 1.1026 0.02409 195 177 16 2
7034 I know that you want to be a "strumbody but that instrument won't help you a bit!! 1.1026 0.02164 234 212 20 2
7035 So your mother said you would always be a failure, encoring with ‘Tiptoe Through the Tulips’?” 1.1024 0.02123 205 184 21 0
7036 Ma mawmaw gave me the blue in my bluegrass tunes. 1.1023 0.02272 215 195 18 2
7037 Peg o’ my heart! She done stole my beer money! 1.1022 0.02211 225 204 19 2
7038 and again. deep breath....a How, How, How, How... 1.1019 0.02222 206 186 19 1
7039 Therapist-so you’ve told me some things you don’t like, for example beans how bout trying to tell me something’s you like Cowboy-you know I like my chicken fried, cold beer on a Friday night, a pair of jeans that fit just right, and the radio uuuppp 1.1019 0.02222 206 186 19 1
7040 "Cut the rap and lets get to the chase. How do you really feel about society" 1.1019 0.02165 216 195 20 1
7041 I think it's time you snapped out of it and stopped being a bloody idiot... we've all had a gut full you nut-job! 1.1019 0.02355 216 197 16 3
7042 How do I get this guy off my neck? 1.1005 0.02295 209 190 17 2
7043 Okay slow down. I'm getting it C...F D Sharp. Got it/ Oh I don't think so Wally continue therapy and you will smile again 1.1000 0.02182 210 190 19 1
7044 What's you say to...'Since my little doggy died, Sweetheart, I need ya by my side!'? 1.1000 0.02476 210 193 13 4
7045 Why do you think it still bothers you so much, Hank Jr., that nobody ever asked if YOU were ready for some footba 1.0996 0.02263 241 221 16 4
7046 Strumthing wrong...but can you be more specific? ejl@gwu.edu 1.0987 0.02100 223 202 20 1
7047 I think you need to just stop playing the guitar. You need to just drop the guitar and sneak do it, so they won't know, and just grab a lasso and sneak do that, too, and then you can put on your old clothes so they won't know it's you. 1.0981 0.02339 214 196 15 3
7048 Sweet home Alabama…Where the skies are so blue… 1.0972 0.02124 216 196 19 1
7049 Now ya know I'm no Payton manning but...... 1.0969 0.02065 227 206 20 1
7050 Oh this set of circumstances enhances the finances of the followers of Dr. Sigmund Freud. 1.0964 0.02228 197 179 17 1
7051 Ajajsjsj 1.0963 0.02106 218 198 19 1
7052 Is the TV invented yet Mark? No? Okay. Twaaang! 1.0954 0.02153 241 221 17 3
7053 Git a long, little doggie 1.0952 0.02140 210 191 18 1
7054 During the first hour do you recall cows moning . 1.0950 0.02078 221 201 19 1
7055 What's you at-home life like? 1.0942 0.02061 223 203 19 1
7056 Please play 'Home on the Range' again. Pretty Please? 1.0938 0.01952 224 203 21 0
7057 Our spoken words into rockabilly count as transference...I surmise. 1.0938 0.01952 224 203 21 0
7058 Benny and the Jets is not “Cowboy”, but there’s no call for the guilt” 1.0936 0.02380 203 187 13 3
7059 So what does "supercalifragilisticexpialidocius mean to you? 1.0935 0.02301 214 197 14 3
7060 My two personas 1.0931 0.02155 204 186 17 1
7061 Let's depart from your childhood for a little while, and talk more about the cowman. (man in italics) 1.0923 0.02078 195 177 18 0
7062 Doc,I don't think your chord progression works for our band. 1.0909 0.01992 231 211 19 1
7063 The thing about my mother - it's that she just didn't try. 1.0900 0.02192 211 194 15 2
7064 Have you tried playing "Wonderwall?" 1.0892 0.01958 213 194 19 0
7065 You possibly think that passive-aggressive 'Cow Plop' riff — you tag your chorus lines with — starts to get a little overbearing? 1.0889 0.02003 225 206 18 1
7066 well my dad was an alcoholic 1.0884 0.02049 215 197 17 1
7067 Hm....your last musical phrase expressed, I would say, pessimism.How do you see yourself in the world? Please, repeat it for me. 1.0876 0.02031 217 199 17 1
7068 And then he said, "Hey guys, this is Austin" over and over again? 1.0875 0.01828 240 219 21 0
7069 Another piece of America’s lost ... 1.0870 0.02079 207 190 16 1
7070 My farts smarter that your heart. 1.0864 0.02202 220 204 13 3
7071 what eateries do you recommend? 1.0862 0.01945 232 213 18 1
7072 Your song of psychic woes will climb with a bullet on the Country Music Sales Charts. 1.0849 0.01919 212 194 18 0
7073 I like the melody Lefty but I think the lyrics about your life on the funny farm are about as interesting as watching an ice cube melt. 1.0847 0.02108 248 231 13 4
7074 So you stole a dog eared map and called for a flightless bird? 1.0823 0.01860 243 224 18 1
7075 Country Music jam session. 1.0821 0.01913 207 190 17 0
7076 Now, when you claim to be 'Eastbound and down'--exactly how 'down' would say that is? 1.0794 0.01853 214 197 17 0
7077 Repeat the one about heading them off at Lovaas. 1.0791 0.01845 215 198 17 0
7078 But 1946 , and they do not all come back to a whistle.. 1.0787 0.01950 216 200 15 1
7079 What could be worse than listening to a grumpy old cowboy and screeching 'music' that sends shivers up your spine? 1.0688 0.01992 189 177 11 1
7080 So you have come to me for ‘glower in the dark’ 1.0683 0.01766 205 191 14 0
7081 to guitar sounds Ah feelin mighty sad, New York is still sayin country music is really sad 1.0652 0.01744 230 216 13 1
7082 In his late life he sat around and played the guitar 1.0615 0.01725 195 183 12 0