Contest #635


Cartoon

635

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “Well, I'm sort of between quests at the moment.”
  2. “It’s not ye, it’s me.”
  3. “You didn’t mention you wear glasses.”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2018-10-14T23:46:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2018-10-28T23:46:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2018-10-22T23:46:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued October 29, 2018
Number of captions 7794
Number of responses 1311984
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 I don't normally date Middle-Aged men. 1.8238 0.06058 193 88 51 54
1 I wrote "middle aged." 1.7086 0.06229 175 92 42 41
2 You could have been clearer when you said you were Middle-Aged. 1.7056 0.05985 180 92 49 39
3 You didn’t mention you wear glasses. 1.7034 0.06647 145 74 40 31
4 I said I was Middle Aged. 1.7011 0.05777 174 84 58 32
5 I don't usually date middle aged men. 1.6923 0.06142 156 77 50 29
6 This is not what I expected when you said you were middle aged. 1.6879 0.06380 157 82 42 33
7 I meant middle-aged. 1.6701 0.05491 194 99 60 35
8 Laundry day? 1.6688 0.06351 157 84 41 32
9 Younger men haven't panned out, so I’m trying the Middle Ages. 1.6588 0.05529 211 116 51 44
10 I've got to use the bathroom, I'll be back in about 45 minutes. 1.6519 0.06281 158 86 41 31
11 Is that your sword touching my leg? 1.6407 0.05837 167 88 51 28
12 I imagined something different when you said you were Middle-Aged. 1.6395 0.06050 172 96 42 34
13 It's not easy for Middle Aged men these days. 1.6387 0.06132 155 83 45 27
14 We need to talk about the other knight. 1.6376 0.06544 149 84 35 30
15 It’s not ye, it’s me 1.6353 0.05822 170 91 50 29
16 People call me Lance. A lot. 1.6348 0.05556 178 93 57 28
17 They gave us a round table. Happy now? 1.6313 0.05923 160 85 49 26
18 Surely you joust. 1.6257 0.05567 187 102 53 32
19 No, my profile says I’m looking for a middle-aged man, not a Middle Age man. 1.6243 0.05927 181 104 41 36
20 Your profile said middle aged not middle ages. 1.6225 0.06215 151 83 42 26
21 So, when are you from? 1.6211 0.06472 161 96 30 35
22 To be honest, I come with a bit of history. 1.6169 0.05694 154 79 55 20
23 I'm sensing you believe these are dangerous times for men. 1.6163 0.05792 172 95 48 29
24 I’m not wearing any under armour. 1.6159 0.06007 151 81 47 23
25 When you said you were middle aged, I pictured something a little different. 1.6139 0.06332 158 92 35 31
26 ...it's just, your profile didn't mention you wear glasses. 1.6108 0.06175 167 98 36 33
27 I don't do one knight stands. 1.6076 0.06012 158 88 44 26
28 So your profile said you were "middle aged"... 1.6065 0.05825 155 83 50 22
29 Can you open that thing yourself or should I step on your foot? 1.6049 0.06214 162 95 36 31
30 And you’re no Guinevere, so let’s call it even. 1.6040 0.06159 149 83 42 24
31 You didn’t mention you were middle aged on your profile 1.6034 0.05791 179 103 44 32
32 I take it that you've been hurt before. 1.6026 0.05799 151 80 51 20
33 So tell me, how do you know Arthur? 1.6014 0.06366 143 81 38 24
34 First date since the divorce? 1.6000 0.05683 170 94 50 26
35 I see you remembered to bring protection. 1.6000 0.05363 195 109 55 31
36 Well you weren't wearing glasses in your profile either. 1.5988 0.05693 172 96 49 27
37 Why does everything have to be a crusade with you? 1.5988 0.05574 167 90 54 23
38 My profile CLEARLY stated I was Middle-Aged.... 1.5955 0.05770 178 103 44 31
39 I guess my dating profile should have disclosed I was Middle Age. 1.5949 0.06158 158 92 38 28
40 Your ad clearly read: “Must be middle aged, chivalrous, and wear protection.” 1.5932 0.05742 177 102 45 30
41 Well, you were honest about being middle-aged. 1.5909 0.05482 176 97 54 25
42 This isn't what I had in mind when your profile said that you were middle- aged. 1.5901 0.06007 161 93 41 27
43 I must have misread “middle aged.” 1.5899 0.05607 178 101 49 28
44 Classy restaurant, busy dinner hour, fine wine, suit of armor. You're breaking up with me, aren't you 1.5895 0.05381 190 107 54 29
45 You did say you were middle-aged. 1.5890 0.05949 163 94 42 27
46 A dating profile that says ‘Early middle-age’ is a little misleading, don’t you think? 1.5889 0.05273 180 97 60 23
47 I think it's time we saw people from our own age. 1.5852 0.05775 176 103 43 30
48 I think there’s been a mistake — my profile said I was looking for someone Middle-Aged. 1.5852 0.05886 176 105 39 32
49 My ex-wife says I have intimacy issues. 1.5849 0.05939 159 91 43 25
50 Why is it always a fight with you? 1.5811 0.06215 148 86 38 24
51 Yeah, well you're not my vision of a princess either. 1.5808 0.05591 167 93 51 23
52 No, I don't do one-knight stands. 1.5793 0.06054 164 98 37 29
53 Now I understand why you insisted on a round table. 1.5789 0.05797 171 100 43 28
54 You seem a little defensive. 1.5787 0.05445 178 100 53 25
55 Fine. Chivalry's not dead. You still look like an idiot. 1.5776 0.05821 161 92 45 24
56 Sorry, I haven't been on a date in a while. I'm a little rusty. 1.5769 0.05755 156 87 48 21
57 This better not be another one knight stand. 1.5769 0.05737 182 109 41 32
58 You weren't wearing glasses in your profile picture. 1.5759 0.05840 158 90 45 23
59 Mom said there’d be knights like this 1.5746 0.05547 181 105 48 28
60 I'm not disappointed, I was just hoping you would be more of a renaissance man. 1.5745 0.05643 188 113 42 33
61 Shirley, you joust. 1.5740 0.05794 169 99 43 27
62 OK. So they found us a round table. Are you happy now? 1.5733 0.06083 150 87 40 23
63 I like star gazing from the turret, moonlit walks along the moat, and beheadings. How about you? 1.5706 0.05502 163 90 53 20
64 Christ Steven, it was just an honorary knighthood. 1.5706 0.06090 163 99 35 29
65 I see you wear protection 1.5705 0.05902 156 90 43 23
66 So you always wear protection? 1.5705 0.05831 156 89 45 22
67 So, ‘looking for a fun knight’ was a typo, then. 1.5696 0.06048 158 94 38 26
68 I usually don't date Middle Ages men. 1.5691 0.05714 181 109 41 31
69 When I asked if you wore protection, I had something else in mind. 1.5688 0.05989 160 95 39 26
70 Oh, I like long walks on the beach, reading good books, and disemboweling and beheading Huns. You? 1.5683 0.06215 139 80 39 20
71 Well, I'm sort of between quests at the moment... 1.5679 0.05800 162 94 44 24
72 I guess writing “likes heavy metal” on my profile may have sent the wrong message 1.5671 0.05746 164 95 45 24
73 It's been a while since I've been on a date. I'm a little rusty. 1.5663 0.05628 166 95 48 23
74 What time do you have to be back to the museum? 1.5655 0.06097 145 84 40 21
75 I have to use the restroom. I’ll be back in a couple of hours. 1.5652 0.06027 161 97 37 27
76 Yes, I can see your irony. 1.5641 0.05907 156 91 42 23
77 I dub thee Sir Not Gonna Have a Second Date. 1.5633 0.05780 158 91 45 22
78 Well, I did say I was looking for someone middle-aged. 1.5618 0.05457 178 103 50 25
79 Well, for one thing, you come across as a little defensive. 1.5617 0.05671 162 93 47 22
80 Well, I’m actually just a squire right now, but they say to dress for the job you want, not the job you have. 1.5614 0.05629 171 100 46 25
81 It'll never work...I'm a morning person and you're a knight. 1.5607 0.05518 173 100 49 24
82 Happy now? They seated us at the Round Table. 1.5581 0.05666 172 102 44 26
83 When I said to bring protection, this wasn't what I had in mind. 1.5570 0.06056 158 96 36 26
84 To tell you the truth, I was looking for "amour". 1.5569 0.05860 167 101 39 27
85 Now I see why you reserved a round table. 1.5562 0.05495 169 97 50 22
86 What part of "renaissance man" was misleading? 1.5562 0.05430 169 96 52 21
87 Well, you're no Guinevere either. 1.5562 0.05575 178 106 45 27
88 Yeah, I've been a little guarded since the breakup. 1.5556 0.05632 171 101 45 25
89 Well you're not what I pictured either, Guinevere. 1.5549 0.05702 173 104 42 27
90 Can't you just wear a lobster bib like everyone else? 1.5549 0.05622 164 95 47 22
91 Don't raise your visor but your ex just walked in. 1.5541 0.05884 157 93 41 23
92 Okay...not exactly what I meant when I said "Bring protection." 1.5541 0.05814 157 92 43 22
93 Chivalrous, outdoorsy, likes horses... Okay, I think I walked into this one. 1.5537 0.05601 177 106 44 27
94 Oh, I thought your profile said Middle Aged. 1.5517 0.05736 174 106 40 28
95 So that's what you meant by "attractive Middle-Aged man." 1.5513 0.05701 156 90 46 20
96 Your profile said you were into heavy metal. 1.5511 0.05270 176 100 55 21
97 You okay with spaghetti? 1.5497 0.05257 171 96 56 19
98 I like to think of myself as middle aged. 1.5487 0.05045 195 112 59 24
99 You need to open up. 1.5484 0.05582 155 88 49 18
100 I guess I did ask for a middle aged man 1.5480 0.05547 177 106 45 26
101 No I said 'medieval life crisis' 1.5467 0.05800 150 87 44 19
102 I do appreciate a man who uses protection. 1.5466 0.05499 161 92 50 19
103 Are you mostly free-lancing these days? 1.5460 0.05720 163 97 43 23
104 Well yes, l did write middle age on my profile. 1.5460 0.05255 174 99 55 20
105 I don't know. I just feel like you have some barriers. 1.5455 0.05209 187 109 54 24
106 My mother cancelled...you can take that off now. 1.5455 0.05514 176 105 46 25
107 I don't think anyone has recognized you, Mr. Pence. 1.5449 0.05805 167 102 39 26
108 Those steel tariffs must be killing you 1.5449 0.05632 156 90 47 19
109 It's laundry day. 1.5437 0.05455 160 91 51 18
110 When I asked you to wear protection, this isn't what I had in mind. 1.5437 0.05667 160 94 45 21
111 When I said wear a suit and bring protection tonight, this isn't what I meant. 1.5434 0.05707 173 106 40 27
112 It's a really scary time for men. 1.5421 0.05308 190 114 49 27
113 Honestly Harold, if you hadn’t slain the maitre d’ maybe we’d have our appetizers by now. 1.5411 0.06309 146 91 31 24
114 You told me to wear protection. 1.5409 0.05695 159 94 44 21
115 So, we got the round table. Happy now? 1.5404 0.05778 161 97 41 23
116 I don’t usually do one knight stands. 1.5400 0.06390 150 96 27 27
117 Mother said there’d be knights like this 1.5394 0.05538 165 97 47 21
118 Sorry, but you are the worst knight of my life. 1.5394 0.05538 165 97 47 21
119 So how do you know Arthur? 1.5393 0.04965 191 109 61 21
120 Your dating profile did say "Enjoying Middle Age," but I interpreted it differently. 1.5389 0.05745 167 102 40 25
121 That's not what I had in mind when I suggested you wear protection tonight... 1.5385 0.05935 169 107 33 29
122 Trust me, no one noticed you had red wine with the fish. 1.5385 0.05921 156 95 38 23
123 To be fair, my profile did say I was middle-aged. 1.5380 0.05931 158 97 37 24
124 In my defense, my profile said I was middle aged. 1.5380 0.05794 158 95 41 22
125 I really thought 'middle-ages-meetup.com meant something else. 1.5375 0.05739 160 96 42 22
126 Issues with intimacy? No, why? 1.5375 0.05600 160 94 46 20
127 I'm not opposed to a one knight stand.... 1.5369 0.05911 149 89 40 20
128 The dragon is free-range.” 1.5369 0.05596 149 85 48 16
129 It's just that you looked younger on your tapestry. 1.5369 0.05596 149 85 48 16
130 This explains the horse in the parking lot. 1.5368 0.05310 190 115 48 27
131 I thought you might prefer the round table over a booth. 1.5366 0.06017 164 104 32 28
132 That is not what I meant when I said you need to wear protection tonight 1.5353 0.05789 170 106 37 27
133 I think you read the ad wrong. I said middle aged. 1.5346 0.05971 159 99 35 25
134 Well, you don’t look much like your picture either. 1.5342 0.05575 161 95 46 20
135 At least tell me if you are a man or a woman. 1.5333 0.06106 150 93 34 23
136 Sometimes I feel we're centuries apart. 1.5333 0.05190 180 105 54 21
137 Can you shut up, Scott? I had a really long day and was hoping for a quiet knight. 1.5325 0.05632 169 103 42 24
138 Would you excuse me for two hours while I visit the men's room? 1.5324 0.05803 139 80 44 15
139 My pronoun is sir. 1.5322 0.05643 171 105 41 25
140 No, I don't want to see your lance a lot. In fact, I don't want to see it at all. 1.5312 0.05741 160 97 41 22
141 No, Bob, it's not called a Middle Ages crisis. 1.5310 0.05958 145 87 39 19
142 You weren't wearing glasses in your profile pic... 1.5306 0.05896 147 88 40 19
143 Really? Now she's living with the dragon? 1.5304 0.05570 181 113 40 28
144 Do I mind being called Lance? A lot. 1.5302 0.05913 149 90 39 20
145 Let me guess, you've been hurt before. 1.5298 0.05467 168 100 47 21
146 I'm sorry you're disappointed but I did say in my profile that i'm a Middle-Aged man. 1.5294 0.05670 170 105 40 25
147 ...you just seem a bit guarded. 1.5294 0.05546 170 103 44 23
148 You didn't tell me you were into heavy metal. 1.5291 0.04894 189 108 62 19
149 I get the sense that you don't often let your guard down. 1.5283 0.05487 159 93 48 18
150 Why yes, I did request a round table. 1.5278 0.05192 180 106 53 21
151 Actually, I'm not wearing anything underneath. 1.5276 0.04926 199 117 59 23
152 I’m sensing that you’ve been hurt in past relationships. 1.5266 0.05508 169 102 45 22
153 I always wear protection. 1.5258 0.05280 194 120 46 28
154 I don’t think I can deal with your Middle Ages crisis. 1.5253 0.05867 158 98 37 23
155 Geez Henry; it was a metaphor. 1.5252 0.05624 139 79 47 13
156 I don’t know. Everything you say sounds so hollow. 1.5244 0.05636 164 100 42 22
157 It takes me a while to open up. 1.5244 0.05364 164 96 50 18
158 You all claim I'm what you're looking for, but when I show up, you think I'm weird... 1.5238 0.05723 168 105 38 25
159 It took her several hours to realize that he had left the restaurant while she was in the bathroom. 1.5238 0.05967 168 109 30 29
160 I'm not into one knight stands 1.5238 0.05819 147 88 41 18
161 If you think slaying a dragon is tough, try raising 3 kids as a single parent. 1.5235 0.05793 170 108 35 27
162 We should talk about the other knight. 1.5235 0.05732 170 107 37 26
163 You should know...I’ve been hurt before. 1.5230 0.05200 174 102 53 19
164 Had to ask for the round table? 1.5226 0.05593 155 92 45 18
165 I'm not wearing a chastity belt while you're off with the boys on one of your crusades. 1.5223 0.05540 157 93 46 18
166 No, I’m not saying your profile was dishonest. We just have different definitions of heavy metal. 1.5222 0.05312 180 109 48 23
167 So you find the Holy Grail. Then what? 1.5222 0.05011 180 104 58 18
168 Jenny didn't tell me you wear glasses. 1.5220 0.05560 159 95 45 19
169 So, ever had a one knight stand? 1.5213 0.05250 188 115 48 25
170 I like you Lance, a lot 1.5212 0.05741 165 103 38 24
171 When you said you were a little rusty I thought you meant at dating. 1.5211 0.04780 213 127 61 25
172 I feel like you never let your guard down when you're with me... 1.5210 0.05624 167 103 41 23
173 Sorry, I don't do one-Knight stands. 1.5205 0.05333 171 102 49 20
174 Did you say one knight stand ? 1.5205 0.05767 171 109 35 27
175 I just think I’m looking for someone less guarded. 1.5203 0.06174 148 94 31 23
176 So tell me, how long does it take for you to go through airport security? 1.5197 0.05520 152 89 47 16
177 They say a hard man is good to find. 1.5196 0.05032 179 104 57 18
178 I only pillaged. I promise. 1.5196 0.05677 179 115 35 29
179 Well, you're an improvement on the last guy. He was a real Neanderthal. 1.5190 0.05587 158 95 44 19
180 I always wear protection on a first date. 1.5189 0.05532 185 118 38 29
181 You seem unusually guarded tonight 1.5188 0.05391 160 94 49 17
182 Yes, I know I wrote looking for middle aged man. 1.5187 0.05327 187 116 45 26
183 'Well, his profile did say middle age.' 1.5185 0.05889 162 103 34 25
184 I don't see why you have to be so defensive. 1.5185 0.05270 162 94 52 16
185 ...That better be your lance 1.5183 0.05188 191 117 49 25
186 Look, I just feel like you’re stuck in the past. 1.5183 0.05434 164 98 47 19
187 I'm in Witness Protection. 1.5181 0.05095 193 117 52 24
188 I can see you've been hurt before. 1.5179 0.05535 168 103 43 22
189 Have you ever dated someone middle-aged? 1.5176 0.05485 170 104 44 22
190 I wasn't sure what to wear either. 1.5174 0.05115 172 100 55 17
191 So, your profile said you’re into heavy metal? 1.5168 0.05521 149 87 47 15
192 It takes awhile for me to open up. 1.5166 0.05781 151 92 40 19
193 When I read your bio I thought middle ages was a typo. 1.5161 0.05669 155 94 42 19
194 Yea, well you’re no “damsel in distress” either ! 1.5153 0.05730 163 102 38 23
195 Well you don't look like your profile photo either. 1.5153 0.05664 163 101 40 22
196 This is my first date in a long time, sorry if I'm a bit rusty 1.5152 0.05545 165 101 43 21
197 Have you thought of NOT telling everyone you voted for Trump? 1.5148 0.05699 169 107 37 25
198 But your posting specifically said "middle aged man" 1.5143 0.05243 175 105 50 20
199 You, on the other hand, look just like your picture. 1.5140 0.05336 179 110 46 23
200 No, I've never had a one Knight stand! 1.5138 0.05291 181 111 47 23
201 Was it too presumptuous of me to wear protection on a first date? 1.5137 0.06165 146 93 31 22
202 Let me guess, you have trouble opening up to people. 1.5132 0.05600 152 91 44 17
203 I'll open up soon. It's been a while, I'm a little rusty. 1.5127 0.05516 158 95 45 18
204 So I said to myself, "Mike, go out and meet people. Quit living in the past." 1.5127 0.05368 158 93 49 16
205 I thought you meant you were taking classes at "night" school. 1.5127 0.05215 158 91 53 14
206 I never open up on the first date. 1.5125 0.05745 160 100 38 22
207 I don't know. You just seem guarded. 1.5125 0.05465 160 96 46 18
208 Exactly how errant are you? 1.5122 0.05638 164 102 40 22
209 Yeah, a lot of women say they want a knight in shining armor, until they actually meet one. 1.5120 0.05651 166 104 39 23
210 When I said you'd have to wear protection........ 1.5119 0.05788 168 108 34 26
211 Yeah, well, you don't look like your profile picture either 1.5118 0.05549 170 106 41 23
212 You've been looking for a fight since we left the house. 1.5115 0.05138 174 103 53 18
213 I am sorry, but that outfit makes you look middle aged. 1.5115 0.05632 174 111 37 26
214 I get that it's a Middle Age dating site. 1.5115 0.05452 174 108 43 23
215 It’s been a while since I’ve dated, so I’m a little rusty. 1.5114 0.05582 176 112 38 26
216 I see you've been updated on our new sexual harassment policy. 1.5104 0.05376 192 123 40 29
217 I promise you a knight you'll never forget. 1.5099 0.05549 151 90 45 16
218 Are you ready for the best knight of your life? 1.5098 0.05800 153 95 38 20
219 Damn autocorrect - I wanted a romantic 'night' out. 1.5094 0.05269 159 93 51 15
220 After the divorce, she took the castle. 1.5093 0.05295 161 95 50 16
221 Your Tinder profile said you were middle-aged, not Middle Ages. 1.5093 0.05295 161 95 50 16
222 You want to make England great again too? 1.5093 0.05919 161 104 32 25
223 It usually takes more than one drink for me to open up. 1.5092 0.05461 163 99 45 19
224 You’ll have to excuse me; it’s been awhile since I’ve dated and I’m a little rusty. 1.5090 0.05295 167 100 49 18
225 Yeah? Well, you're no Lady Guinevere. 1.5090 0.05430 167 102 45 20
226 Don't you think you are drawing unwanted attention to yourself with that plume? 1.5088 0.05709 171 110 35 26
227 Honey, when I said, 'Bring protection...' 1.5087 0.05225 173 104 50 19
228 It's been a while since I've dated and I'm a bit rusty. 1.5087 0.05095 173 102 54 17
229 I’m interested in more than a one knight stand. 1.5086 0.05368 175 108 45 22
230 I’m afraid of getting hurt again. 1.5084 0.05218 179 109 49 21
231 So this is why you insisted on a round table. 1.5079 0.05242 191 120 45 26
232 You could just get the flu shot! 1.5075 0.05092 201 126 48 27
233 I’m not really into one knight stands 1.5068 0.05712 148 90 41 17
234 I don't believe in one-knight stands. 1.5066 0.05678 152 93 41 18
235 Stop with the footsie--it hurts!, 1.5064 0.05716 156 97 39 20
236 Vice President Pence's first date. 1.5063 0.06205 158 106 24 28
237 You appear defensive, Arthur 1.5060 0.05716 166 106 36 24
238 Underneath? I go commando. 1.5060 0.05250 166 99 50 17
239 When you said you were going to night school, I guess I just assumed. 1.5059 0.05423 170 105 44 21
240 Guinevere this, Guinevere that—you’re still not over your ex. 1.5058 0.05439 172 107 43 22
241 No, but what does bother me is you ordered spaghetti. 1.5058 0.05376 172 106 45 21
242 I do have to let you know, I have rust issues. 1.5057 0.05391 174 108 44 22
243 No, Arthur, I don’t think it’s a coincidence we got a round table. 1.5057 0.05513 174 110 40 24
244 Nice look...Lancelot. I said, 'dress for amour'. 1.5056 0.05075 180 108 53 19
245 Now I get why you reserved the round table. 1.5055 0.05270 182 113 46 23
246 I hear it's a scary time to be a man. 1.5054 0.04994 184 110 55 19
247 I guess it _is_ a very scary time for men in America. 1.5054 0.05404 186 119 40 27
248 I can’t say I really have a “favorite” Crusade. 1.5031 0.05598 163 102 40 21
249 Well, I'm in between quests right now. 1.5030 0.05480 165 102 43 20
250 I'll be fine, mom. I'm not going to turn down the opportunity to clerk for Justice Kavanaugh. 1.5030 0.05626 167 106 38 23
251 You seem guarded tonight. 1.5029 0.05071 171 101 54 16
252 Do you come-here-a-lot? 1.5029 0.05769 171 112 32 27
253 I reserved the round table just like you wanted. 1.5029 0.05181 175 106 50 19
254 Well, I did say in my profile that I'm middle-aged. 1.5028 0.05350 181 114 43 24
255 My mother told me there would be knights like this. 1.5028 0.05175 181 111 49 21
256 What makes you think I'm intimidated by women? 1.5027 0.05014 183 110 54 19
257 I can't seem to reach my wallet... 1.5027 0.05034 185 112 53 20
258 Okay, I'm ready to talk politics. 1.5000 0.05314 180 113 44 23
259 My profile was very clear. I 'm looking for amour, not armor. 1.5000 0.05716 166 107 35 24
260 Honestly, I'm more attracted to you with the visor down. 1.5000 0.05345 162 98 47 17
261 Let's be clear I am not intersted in a one knight stand. 1.5000 0.05439 172 108 42 22
262 Let me be clear. I’m not interested in any one-knight stands 1.5000 0.05440 182 117 39 26
263 Sure I’ve been hurt. Why do you ask? 1.5000 0.05536 132 76 46 10
264 My ad clearly said “Middle Ages man seeking companion”. It’s not my fault you thought it was a typo. 1.5000 0.05812 150 94 37 19
265 That's not exactly what I had in mind when I asked if you'd wear protection. 1.5000 0.05583 176 114 36 26
266 I am guessing you don't look much like your photo. 1.4973 0.04916 185 111 56 18
267 I'm not really interested in just a one knight stand. 1.4972 0.05200 177 109 48 20
268 I'm sorry, I'm just not into one knight stands. 1.4972 0.05673 177 117 32 28
269 I said I wanted a memorable NIGHT. 1.4971 0.05429 175 111 41 23
270 Don't worry, I have protection. 1.4971 0.05429 175 111 41 23
271 At least we're both Middle Age. 1.4971 0.05429 175 111 41 23
272 I see you’ve met my ex. 1.4971 0.05225 173 106 48 19
273 I guess mother was right - be careful what you wish for. 1.4971 0.05477 173 110 40 23
274 Fifty years later Sophie fondly remembered the wine but couldn't recall what knight it was. 1.4970 0.05250 169 103 48 18
275 Growing up in the Rust Belt must have been pretty traumatic for you. 1.4970 0.05690 167 108 35 24
276 This isn't what I meant when I asked if you used "protection" 1.4969 0.05391 163 100 45 18
277 I have trouble opening up to women. 1.4969 0.05704 159 101 37 21
278 I like the knight life. I like to boogie. 1.4969 0.05563 159 99 41 19
279 You never like what I wear, Mother. 1.4967 0.05874 153 98 34 21
280 Now I understand why you capitalized “Middle Aged” man in your profile. 1.4967 0.05417 153 92 46 15
281 I'm a little rusty too. But I'm not sure we're talking about the same thing. 1.4963 0.06029 135 84 35 16
282 You’re not what I expected when I asked to meet a damsel in distress either. 1.4945 0.05384 182 117 40 25
283 What makes you think I'm being defensive? 1.4944 0.05300 178 112 44 22
284 I have no interest in a one knight stand. 1.4944 0.05359 178 113 42 23
285 I'm looking for someone a little less guarded 1.4943 0.05267 174 108 46 20
286 I thought after this we could slip into something more comfortable. 1.4942 0.05312 172 107 45 20
287 Well, you don't look much like your profile picture either. 1.4942 0.05182 172 105 49 18
288 And how am I supposed to explain to your father that you've been diagnosed with late-onset, non-specific, trans-historical identity disorder? 1.4942 0.05376 172 108 43 21
289 And I thought ‘a knight on the town’ was just a typo. 1.4941 0.05160 170 103 50 17
290 No, I said I was looking for amour. 1.4940 0.05600 168 108 37 23
291 I clearly wrote I wanted a night of amour. 1.4939 0.05639 164 105 37 22
292 I can fight my own battles now, mom. 1.4937 0.05608 160 101 39 20
293 If you want this relationship to go anywhere, you’re going to have to open up. 1.4936 0.05788 156 100 35 21
294 It’s a scary time for men. 1.4935 0.05547 154 95 42 17
295 I've had better knights 1.4935 0.05698 154 97 38 19
296 You told me to bring protection, didn’t you? 1.4935 0.05698 154 97 38 19
297 To be honest, this is the first time I date a middle aged man. 1.4914 0.05244 175 109 46 20
298 yes, I have been hurt before 1.4912 0.05270 171 106 46 19
299 I haven't been on a date in ages. 1.4911 0.05249 169 104 47 18
300 So tell me, Rusty, how did you get your name? 1.4909 0.05612 165 106 37 22
301 You looked shinier online. 1.4909 0.05411 165 103 43 19
302 I was hoping after a few drinks you’d let your guard down. 1.4908 0.05461 163 102 42 19
303 Look,you have your crusade and I have mine. 1.4908 0.05176 163 98 50 15
304 Actually, what I think I said was a "quiet NIGHT" 1.4906 0.05491 159 99 42 18
305 So...where do you keep your cell phone? 1.4903 0.05444 155 95 44 16
306 But, hey, listen, enough about me already! What do you do? 1.4903 0.05366 155 94 46 15
307 Stop pouting, Martha. You're the one who asked for a knight on the town. 1.4902 0.05725 153 97 37 19
308 No, it said 'seeking middle AGED man with attention to detail. 1.4901 0.05782 151 96 36 19
309 It's been a few ages since my last date. 1.4899 0.05603 149 92 41 16
310 So here I am again,dating another Middle Age man 1.4897 0.05800 145 91 37 17
311 I feel like I'm the only one being vulnerable right now. 1.4892 0.05184 186 118 45 23
312 Knight school? How interesting. 1.4889 0.05314 180 115 42 23
313 I have never even considered a one knight stand, but... 1.4889 0.05314 180 115 42 23
314 Just so you know, I always use protection on the first date. 1.4889 0.05372 180 116 40 24
315 Sorry, I just came from knight school. 1.4881 0.04994 168 100 54 14
316 You strike me as the kind of guy who never lets his guard down. 1.4881 0.05204 168 103 48 17
317 I see you use protection... 1.4881 0.05272 168 104 46 18
318 Middle-aged men", were your words exactly 1.4880 0.05318 166 103 45 18
319 You seem somewhat defensive. 1.4877 0.05005 203 130 47 26
320 I'm surprised they let you in without a tie. 1.4875 0.05392 160 99 44 17
321 I just don't think we are well-suited for each other. 1.4875 0.05245 160 97 48 15
322 It’s just that I’ve been hurt in the past. 1.4873 0.05660 158 101 37 20
323 You could just get a flu shot ya know. 1.4873 0.04966 197 124 50 23
324 All my prior boyfriends were into heavy metal 1.4873 0.04860 197 122 54 21
325 You're right. It does have a metallic taste. 1.4866 0.05050 187 117 49 21
326 Well, I'm not exactly 30, but you're not exactly shining. 1.4866 0.04935 187 115 53 19
327 It takes some time for me to open up... 1.4860 0.05156 179 112 47 20
328 You asked me to use protection. 1.4859 0.05137 177 110 48 19
329 It's a scary time to be a man in America. 1.4859 0.05199 177 111 46 20
330 I guess you could say I'm still feeling pretty guarded after my last relationship. 1.4854 0.05398 171 109 41 21
331 Must we always sit at the round table? 1.4852 0.05113 169 103 50 16
332 What do you mean? My profile clearly stated I was middle-aged. 1.4850 0.05111 200 130 43 27
333 I’m a little nervous. I haven’t dated in ages. 1.4847 0.04715 196 119 59 18
334 I admit I'm a bit guarded. 1.4845 0.05221 161 98 48 15
335 So, you're currently freelance? 1.4845 0.05439 161 101 42 18
336 I thought you'd be happy I gave up that dumb Civil War reenactment hobby. 1.4845 0.05510 161 102 40 19
337 You've got mail. 1.4843 0.05841 159 105 31 23
338 I think I misunderstood you when you asked me to wear protection. 1.4841 0.06035 157 106 26 25
339 Will you excuse me for the next 2 hours? I need to use the restroom. 1.4841 0.05392 157 97 44 16
340 Just to be clear, I said I wanted more "amor". 1.4839 0.05239 186 120 42 24
341 That's not what I meant by "protection." 1.4837 0.05873 153 100 32 21
342 Well, you don't look like your picture either. 1.4835 0.05211 182 116 44 22
343 As you can see, I use protection. 1.4831 0.05358 178 115 40 23
344 I was hoping for more than a one knight stand. 1.4830 0.05575 147 91 41 15
345 It's not what they mean when they say wear protection. 1.4830 0.06132 147 98 27 22
346 So, you came straight from work? 1.4830 0.05158 176 110 47 19
347 You seem a little guarded tonight. 1.4824 0.05292 170 107 44 19
348 It's just a really scary time for men right now. 1.4820 0.06241 139 92 27 20
349 No. I wrote, " I like a good wine and a quiet n-i-g-h-t. 1.4819 0.05248 166 103 46 17
350 I 'm sorry, I'm no longer into one knight stands 1.4819 0.05520 166 107 38 21
351 You’re right. I’m cold, hard and impenetrable. But I can change. 1.4817 0.05079 164 99 51 14
352 It seems you’re just looking for a fight. 1.4817 0.05295 164 102 45 17
353 I understand now why you asked for a round table! 1.4817 0.05081 191 122 46 23
354 I guess there is no need to ask if you brought protection. 1.4815 0.05690 162 106 34 22
355 It's not you, I just have trouble letting my guard down. 1.4813 0.05162 187 120 44 23
356 When I read you were in night school, something different came to mind. 1.4812 0.05391 160 100 43 17
357 It's not you. It's your horse. 1.4811 0.05147 185 118 45 22
358 Sorry, I didn't have time to change. 1.4810 0.05587 158 101 38 19
359 Date Knight. 1.4808 0.05567 156 99 39 18
360 Mama never said there'd be knights like this. 1.4808 0.05641 156 100 37 19
361 You're the first person I've met on this site that looks exactly like their photo! 1.4800 0.05962 150 99 30 21
362 It’s our fourth date, Harvey, but you still seem very defensive. 1.4800 0.05303 200 135 34 31
363 Sure. You can call me 'Fair Maiden' if I can call you 'Sir Sleeps Alone'. 1.4800 0.05810 150 97 34 19
364 Is that your lance under the table or are you just happy to see me? 1.4798 0.05413 173 112 39 22
365 I misunderstood. I thought you worked nights. 1.4797 0.05629 148 93 39 16
366 We could have just established a safe word 1.4795 0.05602 146 91 40 15
367 I specifically requested the Round Table. 1.4794 0.04804 194 120 55 19
368 Actually, my ad said amour. 1.4793 0.05180 169 105 47 17
369 This isn't going to work. You're looking for a damsel in distress and I'm looking for man who isn't stuck in the dark ages. 1.4793 0.05509 169 110 37 22
370 Oh yeah? Try wearing a chastity belt! 1.4790 0.05494 167 108 38 21
371 So, I understand you've been hurt before. 1.4787 0.04856 188 116 54 18
372 You’re awfully guarded. 1.4783 0.05366 161 101 43 17
373 I came straight from work 1.4783 0.04685 184 110 60 14
374 Will this be a one knight stand? 1.4780 0.05771 159 105 32 22
375 Women say I seem guarded. 1.4778 0.05011 180 112 50 18
376 That’s funny. I also carry mace. 1.4775 0.05176 178 113 45 20
377 My friends call me Rusty. 1.4775 0.05237 178 114 43 21
378 My dating skills are a little rusty 1.4774 0.05124 155 93 50 12
379 Actually, your armor isn't the only thing that's dull. 1.4773 0.05029 176 109 50 17
380 It's a very scary time for young men in America. 1.4771 0.05571 153 97 39 17
381 I consider myself a bit of a renaissance man. 1.4765 0.05436 149 92 43 14
382 My kingdom for a straw! 1.4765 0.05157 170 106 47 17
383 Quit the footsies. It hurts. 1.4765 0.05290 170 108 43 19
384 Not the round table you were expecting, I suppose. 1.4762 0.04895 189 118 52 19
385 You are aware it's just a metaphor, aren't you? 1.4762 0.05269 168 106 44 18
386 I said I was looking for AMOUR, not ... oh, forget it 1.4762 0.05469 168 109 38 21
387 What, this old thing? 1.4762 0.05337 168 107 42 19
388 I'm sorry, but I'm not feeling any alchemy between us. 1.4762 0.05738 147 94 36 17
389 I think "DateKnight.com" was pretty self-explanatory 1.4762 0.05403 168 108 40 20
390 He had described himself in his profile as a "chivalrous, outdoorsy, Middle Aged man," but somehow she still felt mislead. 1.4759 0.05161 187 121 43 23
391 You look sharp, Stanley but I'm not looking for a one knight stand. 1.4759 0.05584 166 109 35 22
392 You’re one to talk—your blazer and hairstyle are right out of the 1980s. 1.4759 0.05629 145 91 39 15
393 Your ad said you liked heavy-metal 1.4757 0.05030 185 117 48 20
394 Sorry, but I'm past my one-knight-stand days. 1.4755 0.06023 143 94 30 19
395 Trust me: the way this date is going, you didn't need to bring protection. 1.4754 0.04951 183 114 51 18
396 I know your wife isn’t here, but this is ridiculous, Mr. Vice President. 1.4753 0.05756 162 108 31 23
397 It's just that everything you say sounds like a canned response. 1.4753 0.05195 162 100 47 15
398 I said amore not armor! 1.4751 0.05289 181 118 40 23
399 You're just too guarded... 1.4750 0.05090 160 97 50 13
400 You seem guarded. 1.4749 0.05215 179 115 43 21
401 I enjoy verbal jousting as well. 1.4749 0.04904 179 110 53 16
402 I've also been hurt before. 1.4746 0.05008 177 110 50 17
403 You’re going to have to let your guard down a little. 1.4746 0.04944 177 109 52 16
404 Let me guess. You're sensitive on the inside? 1.4743 0.05114 175 110 47 18
405 I rarely get a knight out. 1.4742 0.05020 194 125 46 23
406 Sure, your place, if you have a wrench. 1.4740 0.05768 154 101 33 20
407 When your profile said you were into heavy metal I thought it meant hard rock. 1.4740 0.05222 173 110 44 19
408 I’m kinda rusty at this too. 1.4734 0.04970 169 103 52 14
409 Why don't you just get a flu shot already? 1.4731 0.05686 167 112 31 24
410 Well, yes, I have been told I’m a little guarded. 1.4730 0.05377 148 91 44 13
411 I know I said I preferred a quiet knight with a glass of red... 1.4728 0.05223 184 120 41 23
412 That’s not my lance. 1.4724 0.04822 199 126 52 21
413 Well, you don't look anything like your Tinder photo either." 1.4722 0.05071 180 114 47 19
414 Well, you don't look like my damsel in distress either. 1.4721 0.05117 197 130 41 26
415 Excuse me if I'm a little rusty. 1.4719 0.05113 178 113 46 19
416 Apparently the dating service doesn't understand metaphors. 1.4718 0.05887 142 92 33 17
417 I see you brought protection. 1.4717 0.05414 159 101 41 17
418 So how do you like the Date Knight app? 1.4717 0.05188 159 98 47 14
419 This isn't 'just a phase,' Carol. 1.4717 0.05487 159 102 39 18
420 So, Arthur, what do you do for a living? 1.4713 0.05312 157 98 44 15
421 So that's why you requested a round table. 1.4713 0.04937 174 107 52 15
422 So you’re happy now that we got a round table? 1.4713 0.05569 174 117 32 25
423 This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I wrote middle age in my profile. 1.4713 0.05069 174 109 48 17
424 So I'm wearing a suit. Are you happy now? 1.4713 0.05134 174 110 46 18
425 I know you wore it in your profile pic but I thought that just meant you had a good sense of humor. 1.4710 0.05283 155 96 45 14
426 I wish just once you'd open up a little. 1.4710 0.05439 155 98 41 16
427 Or, you could just get a flu shot. 1.4709 0.05308 172 111 41 20
428 Another blind date, another awkward knight out. 1.4706 0.05354 170 110 40 20
429 Um, my dating profile actually specified that I was desperately seeking a middle-aged man, not a man from the Middle Ages. 1.4706 0.05354 170 110 40 20
430 Being middle aged doesn’t mean we have to dress that way! 1.4706 0.05354 170 110 40 20
431 When I said I was into the British Invasion I meant 60's rock, not the crusades. 1.4702 0.05401 168 109 39 20
432 I can see why you have problems with intimacy. 1.4699 0.05175 166 104 46 16
433 I said amour. Amour! 1.4699 0.05450 166 108 38 20
434 I get it, you've been hurt before... 1.4696 0.04989 181 114 49 18
435 Well, your profile clearly stated you were into heavy metal. 1.4696 0.05110 181 116 45 20
436 So, how do you know Susan? 1.4695 0.05075 164 101 49 14
437 Sorry, but it takes about 3 people and some screw drivers to get me to open up 1.4695 0.05220 164 103 45 16
438 I’d love to date again but I’m a little rusty. 1.4695 0.05148 164 102 47 15
439 You seem a bit guarded. 1.4691 0.05481 162 105 38 19
440 You looked shinier in your profile picture. 1.4688 0.05314 160 101 43 16
441 When your ad said middle-aged man, I’m afraid I drew the wrong conclusion. 1.4688 0.05004 192 124 46 22
442 By the way, fun fact - I’m also wearing an ankle monitor. 1.4686 0.04982 175 109 50 16
443 You would probably meet more people if you were less guarded. 1.4684 0.05132 158 97 48 13
444 It was metaphorical, Jack. 1.4682 0.05220 173 111 43 19
445 I thought you said 'amour' 1.4681 0.05082 188 122 44 22
446 So, I take it that you have intimacy issues. 1.4679 0.05489 156 100 39 17
447 Sorry, I'm not into one knight stands. 1.4678 0.05394 171 112 38 21
448 Yes, you did say that you were into heavy metal..... 1.4678 0.05394 171 112 38 21
449 I said I wanted a night of amour, not a knight of armor! 1.4677 0.05066 186 120 45 21
450 And you must be Lance. 1.4670 0.04968 182 115 49 18
451 When I asked if you had protection, that wasn't what I had in mind. 1.4667 0.05473 165 108 37 20
452 For God's sake, Frank, you have my consent to raise your visor. 1.4667 0.05643 135 84 39 12
453 This would be my first one knight stand. 1.4667 0.05069 180 115 46 19
454 Another one knight stand... 1.4659 0.05153 176 113 44 19
455 For some reason they always seat me at the round table 1.4659 0.05026 176 111 48 17
456 So the break-up left you feeling vulnerable. 1.4659 0.05026 176 111 48 17
457 Well, this has certainly been a knight to forget. 1.4658 0.05434 161 104 39 18
458 Are you sure you’re not bothered by our difference in age? 1.4655 0.05197 174 112 43 19
459 I'm glad to see you finally got off your high horse. 1.4654 0.05030 159 97 50 12
460 Most women like the plume. 1.4653 0.05479 144 90 41 13
461 It's a very scary time for men in America. 1.4652 0.05102 187 122 43 22
462 We'd probably have the bread basket by now if you hadn't called her "wench". 1.4651 0.05432 172 114 36 22
463 You and the horse you rode in on. 1.4650 0.05310 157 99 43 15
464 Oh, swell. Another one knight stand. 1.4647 0.05543 170 114 33 23
465 I'm looking for someone a little less rigid. 1.4647 0.05085 170 107 47 16
466 I said I wanted a romantic night! 1.4645 0.05008 183 117 47 19
467 I said I was seeking amour, not armor. 1.4645 0.05067 183 118 45 20
468 You seem defensive tonight 1.4643 0.04987 168 104 50 14
469 I'll be honest - I have a hard time being vulnerable. 1.4634 0.05359 164 106 40 18
470 I can't tell you the last time I had a knight out 1.4634 0.05359 164 106 40 18
471 So that's what you meant by Renaissance man. 1.4634 0.05146 164 103 46 15
472 So I see you prefer a round table over a booth. 1.4634 0.05429 164 107 38 19
473 "Diane, this might be a little forward on our first date, but for baby names, I like, Lance a lot" 1.4633 0.05375 177 118 36 23
474 Everyone’s looking for a knight in shining armor, but no one ever asks me what I’m looking for. 1.4629 0.04913 175 109 51 15
475 I'm in the White House press corps, why do you ask? 1.4629 0.05237 175 114 41 20
476 Don't worry. I'll wear protection. 1.4628 0.05136 188 124 41 23
477 Yes, you got us the round table. I'm very impressed. 1.4626 0.05733 147 96 34 17
478 Don’t worry, I’ve dated men with tough exteriors before.” 1.4625 0.04766 160 95 56 9
479 All I said was, "We need to talk." 1.4624 0.05087 173 110 46 17
480 My profile said middle aged not Middle Ages... 1.4624 0.04953 173 108 50 15
481 And the horse you came in on? 1.4624 0.05021 173 109 48 16
482 Looks like another one knight stand. 1.4624 0.05121 186 122 42 22
483 I misread your personal ad – I thought it said you were looking for someone "middle aged." 1.4620 0.05130 171 109 45 17
484 Wow, this suit really makes a fart sound like a foghorn! 1.4619 0.05114 197 132 39 26
485 You've got a little something stuck in your helmet. 1.4615 0.05767 143 93 34 16
486 I told you when you called that I had no interest in a one-knight stand. 1.4611 0.05488 167 111 35 21
487 I'll have the swordfish. 1.4611 0.05287 167 108 41 18
488 Our relationship would be a lot stronger if you'd just let your guard down 1.4610 0.05303 154 97 43 14
489 When it comes to dating, I'm a little rusty. 1.4607 0.04983 178 113 48 17
490 Do I look like a woman in distress? 1.4607 0.04919 178 112 50 16
491 At best, this will be a one knight stand. 1.4607 0.04854 178 111 52 15
492 Why are you always so defensive? 1.4606 0.05604 165 111 32 22
493 I just feel like you're masking your true feelings. 1.4606 0.05194 165 105 44 16
494 When you said you were a Renaissance man I was picturing something a little different 1.4606 0.05122 165 104 46 15
495 So then after I graduated from knight school... 1.4605 0.05103 152 93 48 11
496 I don’t know why you’re surprised—I told you I reserved a round table. 1.4605 0.05669 152 100 34 18
497 I understand. We’ve all been wounded. 1.4602 0.04826 176 109 53 14
498 I've been told it's a scary time for men. 1.4602 0.05023 176 112 47 17
499 My entry under Interests said: " amour" not "armor." 1.4602 0.05457 176 119 33 24
500 My personal did say middle aged! 1.4601 0.05452 163 107 37 19
501 My personal ad said that I'm looking for 'amour' not 'armor'! 1.4599 0.05099 187 123 42 22
502 I told the agency I liked middle aged men, not men from thee Middle Ages 1.4598 0.05321 174 115 38 21
503 This is so much more intimate than my usual round table. 1.4596 0.05061 161 100 48 13
504 What am I looking for in a woman? That's easy. Distress. 1.4596 0.05212 161 102 44 15
505 I hope this date doesn't end up as just another one knight stand. 1.4593 0.05303 172 113 39 20
506 Could thee get me a straw? 1.4593 0.05303 172 113 39 20
507 No, I don't know how astronauts use the bathroom. 1.4593 0.05107 172 110 45 17
508 Yeah, and I'm a dead ringer for Guinevere. 1.4590 0.04631 183 112 58 13
509 So, you took me literally. 1.4589 0.04680 207 133 53 21
510 Am I sensing some disenchantment? 1.4588 0.05414 170 113 36 21
511 Stop being so defensive. 1.4588 0.05349 170 112 38 20
512 I said ‘date night’, not ‘date knight.’ 1.4588 0.05218 170 110 42 18
513 I really need to remove "seeks strong,silent type" from my dating profile. 1.4588 0.05082 170 108 46 16
514 You do know what a metaphor is, right? 1.4586 0.05046 181 117 45 19
515 I can't believe you made us wait an extra hour for a round table. 1.4586 0.05225 181 120 39 22
516 So....why did you insist on a round table? 1.4586 0.05283 181 121 37 23
517 It’s our third date. Will you at least tell me your pronoun? 1.4583 0.05296 144 89 44 11
518 You seem to have some trust issues. 1.4583 0.05330 168 110 39 19
519 I meant date night,not date knight. 1.4583 0.05397 168 111 37 20
520 Let me guess. You don't have pockets for your wallet? 1.4581 0.05586 155 102 35 18
521 Your profile said you were a man in the Middle Ages but I thought that meant you were 45-65. 1.4581 0.05586 155 102 35 18
522 Maybe I'm wrong, but you seem a bit defensive tonight. 1.4581 0.05277 155 98 43 14
523 Sue never said you were middle-aged. 1.4578 0.05377 166 109 38 19
524 I said I wanted a NIGHT out on the town. 1.4578 0.05377 166 109 38 19
525 Thanks for choosing the round table. 1.4578 0.05377 166 109 38 19
526 I take it vulnerability is not your strong point. 1.4575 0.05326 153 97 42 14
527 I'm a little rusty at this dating thing. 1.4575 0.05078 153 94 48 11
528 But anyways, enough about my personal crusades. What do you like to do on the weekends? 1.4573 0.04843 164 100 53 11
529 This is definitely going to be my last one knight stand! 1.4573 0.05426 164 108 37 19
530 Would you mind taking your glasses off? 1.4573 0.05494 164 109 35 20
531 We’d be on dessert by now if you hadn’t insisted on waiting for a round table. 1.4570 0.05286 186 126 35 25
532 Leather, I could understand. 1.4566 0.05018 173 110 47 16
533 My mother always told me to wear protection. 1.4565 0.04802 184 116 52 16
534 Yeah, so I lied too. I am not really a queen. 1.4563 0.05455 160 105 37 18
535 John, it's no longer funny when you order the 'Sir Loin'. 1.4558 0.05308 147 92 43 12
536 I wouldn't say I'm a damsel, but I'm definitely distressed. 1.4556 0.05371 169 112 37 20
537 Sorry. I'm rusty at this. 1.4551 0.05075 167 106 46 15
538 Sometimes I feel like you're not in there anymore. 1.4551 0.04916 178 113 49 16
539 My other suit is at the smithy's. 1.4551 0.05106 178 116 43 19
540 I think you took what I was looking for too literally. 1.4545 0.05379 154 99 40 15
541 I totally agree, its a dangerous time to be a man. 1.4545 0.05148 176 115 42 19
542 It's a very scary time for young men in America right now. 1.4545 0.05848 143 95 31 17
543 How long have you been a mail man? 1.4545 0.05602 165 112 31 22
544 When Janet described you, I thought she was speaking metaphorically 1.4545 0.05514 176 121 30 25
545 Well, my profile did mention I was middle aged. 1.4540 0.05318 174 116 37 21
546 So, you're from LaMancha? Is that near Toledo? 1.4540 0.04939 163 101 50 12
547 A knight out. Very funny. 1.4540 0.05090 163 103 46 14
548 So it really was a current photo. 1.4539 0.05666 152 101 33 18
549 I have intimacy issues. 1.4530 0.04920 181 116 48 17
550 I have a hard time opening up to people 1.4529 0.04869 170 106 51 13
551 You might as well get the swordfish. 1.4528 0.05478 159 105 36 18
552 Yes, your profile said you're into heavy metal... 1.4528 0.05331 159 103 40 16
553 Over time David learned to cope with Susan's sharp tongue. 1.4527 0.05699 148 98 33 17
554 Lance, you know I prefer a booth, but you always insist on a round table. 1.4527 0.05618 148 97 35 16
555 Well, you don't look like *your* photo either. 1.4526 0.04980 190 125 44 21
556 I know my profile said I was into heavy metal... 1.4525 0.04831 179 113 51 15
557 This date is a knightmare. 1.4524 0.05123 168 108 44 16
558 I hope this isn't another one knight stand! 1.4524 0.05260 168 110 40 18
559 Your Tinder profile didn’t mention you were into heavy metal. 1.4521 0.05131 188 126 39 23
560 I’ll need a little help when the soup comes. 1.4521 0.05838 146 98 30 18
561 I was hoping you'd have a bit more polish. 1.4520 0.05310 177 119 36 22
562 The flu shot just doesn't seem to be enough anymore. 1.4518 0.05306 166 109 39 18
563 You should be very happy - the maitre d' gave us the only round table. 1.4518 0.05237 166 108 41 17
564 This wasn’t what I meant when I said I like guys into heavy metal. 1.4516 0.05657 155 104 32 19
565 Sorry, I came straight from work. 1.4516 0.05353 155 100 40 15
566 Oh, you said 'amour'... 1.4514 0.05104 175 114 43 18
567 Yes, I've been hurt a few times. How can you tell? 1.4513 0.04664 195 124 54 17
568 Sorry, but I think your party is sitting at the larger round table, behind you. 1.4512 0.05212 164 106 42 16
569 I made sure to reserve a round table. 1.4511 0.04799 184 117 51 16
570 You seem a little closed off. 1.4510 0.05323 153 98 41 14
571 Its so refreshing when someone's profile photo actually matches them in person. 1.4510 0.05712 153 103 31 19
572 How would you have dressed for a square table? 1.4509 0.05147 173 113 42 18
573 The suit is a rental but I own the lance. 1.4509 0.04947 173 110 48 15
574 Well, mainly because Brett Kavanaugh is a much more common name than people realize. 1.4508 0.04811 193 125 49 19
575 Is that a sword in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? 1.4506 0.05402 162 107 37 18
576 Regrettably, Gwen had assumed her date’s online profile promising “a knight to remember” included a typo. 1.4506 0.05110 162 103 45 14
577 That's not what I meant when I said make sure to bring protection. 1.4505 0.05141 182 121 40 21
578 I liked you better in the hallway 1.4500 0.05664 160 109 30 21
579 And then ideally I’d slay the dragon and save the princess. What about you? What’s your perfect date? 1.4500 0.05231 160 103 42 15
580 Defensive? I’m not being defensive! 1.4500 0.05379 160 105 38 17
581 I don't care how big your sword is, Mr. Lancelot. 1.4497 0.05434 169 114 34 21
582 Well, I see being middle aged as a good thing. 1.4497 0.05168 169 110 42 17
583 I wasn't in distress until you called me a 'damsel.' 1.4497 0.05302 169 112 38 19
584 Sorry. I've no interest in a one-knight stand. 1.4497 0.05302 169 112 38 19
585 You seem nice, and all, but I like my knights in white satin. 1.4494 0.05165 178 118 40 20
586 So, when I was young they called me Lance, a lot. 1.4494 0.05354 158 103 39 16
587 Mother always said be careful what you wish for. 1.4491 0.05212 167 109 41 17
588 It's been ages since my last blind date. I'm a bit rusty. 1.4489 0.05082 176 115 43 18
589 I identify as Medieval. You? 1.4489 0.04952 176 113 47 16
590 I told the dating service that I wanted a NIGHT person" 1.4487 0.05248 156 100 42 14
591 This is my last 'one-knight' stand. 1.4486 0.04901 185 120 47 18
592 I have not been on a date in ages! 1.4485 0.05465 165 111 34 20
593 I know I can seem a bit guarded. 1.4485 0.04564 194 122 57 15
594 Thank you for getting off your high horse -- now, if you just open up and talk to me. 1.4483 0.05124 174 114 42 18
595 Interested in a one knight stand? 1.4483 0.05867 145 98 29 18
596 It’s the armor, isn’t it? 1.4481 0.05059 183 121 42 20
597 You were shinier in your profile. 1.4479 0.04884 192 126 46 20
598 So your profile said you're a damsel in distress. 1.4479 0.05376 163 108 37 18
599 I'm smiling on the inside. 1.4477 0.04756 172 107 53 12
600 Fine. Fine. Just keep your sword in your pants. 1.4474 0.05345 152 98 40 14
601 I’m getting hints of tobacco, leather, and just a slight metallic finish. 1.4474 0.04807 190 123 49 18
602 I guess I keep my guard up in some ways, too. 1.4472 0.04737 161 98 54 9
603 It would be a lot easier if you just got the flu shot. 1.4472 0.05635 161 110 30 21
604 You know, it's a very scary time for young men in America. 1.4469 0.05142 179 119 40 20
605 You don't need that. I'm on the pill. 1.4469 0.04892 179 115 48 16
606 Pick up the check? I can hardly pick up my glass! 1.4468 0.04784 188 121 50 17
607 You ever think YOU’RE the one being defensive? 1.4465 0.05252 159 103 41 15
608 You don't look like your profile either. 1.4465 0.05401 159 105 37 17
609 I can totally relate. I call my first marriage the Dark Ages. 1.4464 0.04978 168 107 47 14
610 Why must you always be so defensive? 1.4464 0.05188 168 110 41 17
611 I said looking for a single night. Damn autocorrect. 1.4464 0.05456 168 114 33 21
612 I always use protection. 1.4464 0.05521 168 115 31 22
613 I can see you're not ready for commitment. 1.4464 0.05049 168 108 45 15
614 A screwdriver would be better 1.4463 0.05059 177 116 43 18
615 You are too defensive. I didn't say dull, I said you're a little tarnished. 1.4462 0.04717 195 126 51 18
616 I'm being defensive?!? 1.4459 0.05531 148 97 36 15
617 Usually my dates don't put on protection until after dinner. 1.4459 0.05695 148 99 32 17
618 My chastity belt is killing me. 1.4457 0.05101 175 115 42 18
619 Just for ONCE could we sit at a SQUARE table/ 1.4457 0.04971 175 113 46 16
620 Want to get a little errant? 1.4457 0.04858 184 119 48 17
621 I just don't feel like you ever let your guard down. 1.4456 0.04919 193 128 44 21
622 Medieval Studies at Indiana. Why do you ask? 1.4451 0.04836 164 102 51 11
623 I transitioned to heavy metal after gothic rock. 1.4451 0.05461 173 119 31 23
624 My therapist says I need to work on letting my guard down. 1.4451 0.05209 173 115 39 19
625 'Tis not thou, 'tis me. 1.4451 0.05209 173 115 39 19
626 Did you order the WD 40? 1.4451 0.05078 173 113 43 17
627 Something tells me you've been hurt before. 1.4451 0.04896 182 118 47 17
628 The service is terrible here, I've been waiting ages. 1.4444 0.04522 189 118 58 13
629 I'm actually an accountant by day. This is just my knight job. 1.4444 0.04823 189 123 48 18
630 For me, you're just another one knight stand...... 1.4444 0.05053 171 111 44 16
631 Worst date knight ever. 1.4444 0.05327 162 107 38 17
632 you need to let your guard down 1.4444 0.05181 162 105 42 15
633 I said I wanted amour. 1.4444 0.05119 180 120 40 20
634 Thank you for wearing protection Bob. 1.4444 0.04807 180 115 50 15
635 Your ad said, 'Tall, funny, middle-ages'. 1.4444 0.04915 171 109 48 14
636 I was hoping for someone middle-aged, not from the Middle Ages. 1.4444 0.05556 153 102 34 17
637 It is just one glass of wine, you won't become unhinged 1.4444 0.05318 153 99 40 14
638 So — what do you do? 1.4439 0.04740 187 120 51 16
639 Let me guess. This is going to be a one-knight stand, right? 1.4439 0.04740 187 120 51 16
640 I overdressed again didn't I? 1.4439 0.04740 187 120 51 16
641 This is a very scary time for young men in America. 1.4438 0.05162 178 119 39 20
642 It’s just that you’ve become so...guarded... 1.4438 0.05026 169 109 45 15
643 Wow! You really meant it when you said you wear "protection!" 1.4438 0.05299 169 113 37 19
644 I really thought you would get us a better table, Arthur. 1.4438 0.05095 169 110 43 16
645 The aluminum tariffs have hit us especially hard 1.4438 0.05074 160 102 45 13
646 I specifically requested the round table, just for you. 1.4438 0.05519 160 108 33 19
647 I just wish you would understand that there is a person in here 1.4437 0.05201 151 96 43 12
648 I swear, this isn't a one knight stand. 1.4432 0.05014 176 115 44 17
649 I'm not really in to heavy-metal. 1.4432 0.05205 176 118 38 20
650 I feel like I can never get through to you. 1.4432 0.04949 176 114 46 16
651 My ex girlfriend told me I had a hard time letting my guard down. 1.4431 0.05068 167 108 44 15
652 Sorry, I’m just not into Heavy Metal. 1.4431 0.05277 167 111 38 18
653 So... you’re in between jobs? 1.4431 0.05277 167 111 38 18
654 I can’t open up. 1.4431 0.05139 167 109 42 16
655 So let me get this straight, you slayed a dragon but had to have the sommelier open the twist cap off the wine. 1.4430 0.05498 158 106 34 18
656 I gotta be honest, I never do anything on the first knight. 1.4430 0.05498 158 106 34 18
657 You looked a lot shinier in your picture. 1.4430 0.05349 158 104 38 16
658 How would I know if the men's room has a socket wrench? 1.4430 0.05498 158 106 34 18
659 We've both changed. But you've tarnished. 1.4430 0.05419 149 97 38 14
660 Yes, your profile said you are into heavy metal. My bad. 1.4427 0.04768 192 125 49 18
661 Well, yes, I guess I am happy to see that you are wearing protection but... 1.4426 0.05231 183 125 35 23
662 When your singles profile said that you were a renaissance man, I didn't think it was literal. 1.4424 0.05112 165 107 43 15
663 What can I say? It’s a scary time to be a man. 1.4422 0.05472 147 96 37 14
664 Just because there is a sale doesn't mean you have to buy it. 1.4421 0.04861 190 125 46 19
665 Well, you look nothing like your dating profile picture either. 1.4421 0.04975 190 127 42 21
666 I feel like you’re being defensive. 1.4421 0.05085 190 129 38 23
667 It's hard to see eye-to-eye with you. 1.4419 0.04752 172 108 52 12
668 Please tell me you’re in distress. 1.4419 0.04823 172 109 50 13
669 I told them I wanted a date tonight, not a knight to date. 1.4419 0.05229 172 115 38 19
670 I thought by our third date, you'd let your guard down. 1.4416 0.05129 154 98 44 12
671 It’s just so difficult to open up on a first date. 1.4415 0.04660 188 120 53 15
672 I don’t know, you just seem so guarded these days. 1.4414 0.05696 145 97 32 16
673 When you said you were coming straight from Knight school I thought you meant something else... 1.4412 0.04862 170 108 49 13
674 So tell me: Why is this knight different from every other knight? 1.4410 0.05348 161 107 37 17
675 We know its you Mr. Kavanagh. 1.4410 0.05201 161 105 41 15
676 You always seem so guarded 1.4409 0.04756 186 120 50 16
677 Was everything OK at work? You seem a bit defensive. 1.4408 0.05259 152 98 41 13
678 When your profile promised “a knight to remember”, I prayed you were just a terrible speller. 1.4407 0.05181 177 119 38 20
679 Well, I appreciate that you use protection. 1.4407 0.05181 177 119 38 20
680 I take it you're only interested in a one-knight stand? 1.4405 0.05387 168 114 34 20
681 Yes, it's a ROUND table. I get it. 1.4405 0.04974 168 108 46 14
682 You're a lot older-looking than your profile picture. 1.4403 0.05323 159 105 38 16
683 For this relationship to go anyway; you need to let your guard down 1.4403 0.05248 159 104 40 15
684 I haven't dated in awhile, so forgive me if I'm a little rusty. 1.4402 0.05151 184 125 37 22
685 How far back do you want to go? 1.4400 0.05474 150 99 36 15
686 I think you misunderstood me when I said I wanted a night out on the town. 1.4400 0.05791 150 103 28 19
687 I’m sure they would have taken that at coat check. 1.4398 0.05159 166 109 41 16
688 My friend said 'Renaissance man', but you look positively Medieval. 1.4397 0.05169 141 88 44 9
689 You know it's a metaphor, right? 1.4396 0.04702 182 116 52 14
690 Yeah, I know...it's a really scary time for boys and men right now. 1.4394 0.06013 132 89 28 15
691 I'm sorry but I haven't dated in Ages. 1.4393 0.05007 173 113 44 16
692 I'm just guessing, but do you have problems with intimacy​ 1.4393 0.04660 173 108 54 11
693 I just don't want to get hurt again. 1.4393 0.04871 173 111 48 14
694 Leonard, "verbal jousting" is a figure of speech. 1.4392 0.05358 148 96 39 13
695 This isn’t going to work unless you can open up to me. 1.4390 0.05131 164 107 42 15
696 Shall we drink to a one knight stand? 1.4389 0.05295 180 124 33 23
697 I liked you better when chivalry was dead... 1.4389 0.04993 180 119 43 18
698 It was my only clean suit 1.4386 0.04547 171 105 57 9
699 Here's to a knight that you won't forget. 1.4385 0.05031 187 126 40 21
700 Honestly, I think we can just be two women having a drink, without this elaborate disguise. 1.4384 0.05665 146 98 32 16
701 It's an open relationship. Whenever he gets to have a night out, I get to have a knight in. 1.4383 0.05250 162 107 39 16
702 Who knew they were going to ban straws? 1.4383 0.05394 162 109 35 18
703 You seem rather defensive. 1.4382 0.05033 178 118 42 18
704 Why do you always have to be so defensive? 1.4382 0.05096 178 119 40 19
705 But enough about me, how do you feel about beheadings? 1.4382 0.05033 178 118 42 18
706 I have an idea on what may have happened here. I told the dating service lady that I enjoy quiet nights. 1.4379 0.05314 153 100 39 14
707 Some say I'm too guarded 1.4379 0.05091 169 111 42 16
708 I am the dark and stormy knight! 1.4375 0.04945 176 115 45 16
709 You never really let your guard down with me. 1.4375 0.04912 160 101 48 11
710 And now I have to deal with these ridiculous bans on straws. 1.4371 0.05064 167 109 43 15
711 Oh. It's speed dating for the middle-aged, not the Middle Ages. 1.4371 0.05204 167 111 39 17
712 Well, you're not exactly what I pictured as my Lady in Waiting either! 1.4371 0.05204 167 111 39 17
713 I don't know why you always make such a big deal about sitting at a round table. 1.4371 0.05273 167 112 37 18
714 You strike me as a guy with intimacy issues" 1.4368 0.04640 174 109 54 11
715 I'm naked underneath. 1.4367 0.05420 158 106 35 17
716 Frankly I think its presumptuous to wear protection on our first date 1.4367 0.05420 158 106 35 17
717 There were perfectly fine square tables we didn't have to wait an hour for. 1.4367 0.05567 158 108 31 19
718 I know: I look nothing like my profile. I've gone through a sort of renaissance. 1.4366 0.05782 142 96 30 16
719 Yet another boring knight alone. 1.4365 0.05033 181 121 41 19
720 Let me guess. This is your idea of ‘irony.’ 1.4364 0.05250 165 110 38 17
721 Well, you're as up to date as most men these days. 1.4364 0.05179 165 109 40 16
722 OK, I get it - you don't want to talk. 1.4364 0.04885 165 105 48 12
723 The sitter just called. The peasants are in revolt again. 1.4364 0.05250 165 110 38 17
724 Your profile said Under Armour. I was thinking athletic. 1.4364 0.05179 165 109 40 16
725 I think you're being defensive. 1.4362 0.05244 149 96 41 12
726 Knight on the town 1.4360 0.05290 172 117 35 20
727 I asked for a "night" to remember... 1.4360 0.04958 172 112 45 15
728 Don't expect me to be a pawn. 1.4360 0.05093 172 114 41 17
729 I'm a bit rusty on the dating scene. 1.4360 0.04958 172 112 45 15
730 I guess this qualifies as incognito, but you're still attracting attention. 1.4359 0.05078 156 100 44 12
731 I think that your therapist is an idiot, Harold. 1.4359 0.05078 156 100 44 12
732 After the divorce I said to myself, ‘You’ve got to get back on the horse.’ 1.4359 0.04711 195 128 49 18
733 Well, now that you mention it, you're not what I expected either." 1.4358 0.04948 179 118 44 17
734 I have a hard time letting people in. 1.4358 0.04688 179 114 52 13
735 I'm not into Heavy Metal. 1.4357 0.05664 140 93 33 14
736 The Round Table is a lot smaller than I thought." 1.4356 0.05296 163 109 37 17
737 So ma'am, how long have you been in distress? 1.4356 0.05151 163 107 41 15
738 That's not exactly what I meant when I asked you to bring protection. 1.4356 0.05367 163 110 35 18
739 I told you I wasn't ready for a face-to-face meeting. 1.4355 0.04813 186 122 47 17
740 You seem a little defensive for a first date. 1.4354 0.05551 147 98 34 15
741 Apparently we have different expectations for date knight. 1.4354 0.05381 147 96 38 13
742 Look, I thought we sorted this out last time. I did not mean to stab you with the fork. 1.4353 0.04999 170 111 44 15
743 I guess you could say I am guarded. 1.4353 0.05136 170 113 40 17
744 Well at least you look like your profile picture. 1.4351 0.05366 154 102 37 15
745 This isn't quite the date knight I imagined. 1.4350 0.04857 177 115 47 15
746 If you think it's a scary time for men now, just wait till November 6th. 1.4350 0.05479 177 125 27 25
747 If you'll excuse me, I must use the men's room. I'll be right back in an hour and a half. 1.4348 0.05535 138 90 36 12
748 And that's how I became the King of England. So, what do you do for work? 1.4348 0.05147 184 126 36 22
749 Of course, it’s not ALL raping and pillaging, but we have fun. 1.4348 0.05121 161 105 42 14
750 I know everyone's a little guarded on the first date, but this is ridiculous. 1.4348 0.05121 161 105 42 14
751 Another blind date, another bad knight. 1.4345 0.05111 168 111 41 16
752 Why the long mace? 1.4343 0.04691 175 111 52 12
753 What's your problem? Your profile said 'love heavy metal.' 1.4343 0.05157 175 118 38 19
754 Oh, I thought you said you went to "night" school. 1.4342 0.05336 152 100 38 14
755 Yes, but I also enjoy verbal jousting. 1.4341 0.04762 182 118 49 15
756 It's just hard to get through to you... 1.4341 0.04826 182 119 47 16
757 This isn't what I meant when I told you to bring some protection. 1.4341 0.04950 182 121 43 18
758 Frankly I think your attitude is positively medieval. 1.4340 0.05166 159 104 41 14
759 I pictured something else when I read "Man of Steel" in your profile. 1.4340 0.05318 159 106 37 16
760 Not what I meant when I said I wanted a night out, Jerry. 1.4337 0.05363 166 113 34 19
761 I wasn’t in distress until you sat at my table. 1.4337 0.05083 166 109 42 15
762 What kind of relationship can we expect if you won't open up? 1.4337 0.05430 166 114 32 20
763 No, your knight will not be taking my queen. 1.4335 0.05136 173 116 39 18
764 I like you a lot, Lance. 1.4335 0.04936 173 113 45 15
765 Knight cap?? 1.4333 0.04734 180 116 50 14
766 Queen checks knight 1.4333 0.05468 150 100 35 15
767 You just seem a little defensive. 1.4333 0.05386 150 99 37 14
768 Miriam! It's been ages! 1.4333 0.05051 180 121 40 19
769 Clerking for Kavanaugh? 1.4331 0.05443 157 106 34 17
770 I swear, this is the last time I use a figure of speech in a personal ad. 1.4329 0.05199 164 109 39 16
771 That's not what I mean about always wearing protection, son. 1.4329 0.05411 164 112 33 19
772 Well, you looked a lot less middle-aged online too. 1.4327 0.04764 171 109 50 12
773 You seem a little stiff. 1.4327 0.04976 171 112 44 15
774 I meant "Knight in Shining Armor" as a metaphor, Ronald. 1.4326 0.04901 178 117 45 16
775 What makes you say I'm old fashioned? 1.4324 0.04644 185 119 52 14
776 I don't think this is going to work out. You're always so guarded. 1.4322 0.04416 199 127 58 14
777 Should we start with the WD-40? 1.4320 0.05017 169 111 43 15
778 I care about the environment, too, but I need a straw. 1.4318 0.04941 176 116 44 16
779 Would you say you’re an introvert? 1.4318 0.04941 176 116 44 16
780 I was hoping for a one knight stand. 1.4316 0.04738 190 125 48 17
781 As you can imagine, I hate the ban on straws 1.4314 0.05308 153 101 38 14
782 This is nice. I like their round tables. 1.4311 0.05269 167 113 36 18
783 Is that your jousting pole or are you just happy to meet me? 1.4309 0.05149 181 124 36 21
784 Stop complaining. You're not the one wearing a chastity belt. 1.4309 0.05209 181 125 34 22
785 I think I'll start with a few squirts of 3 in 1 oil. 1.4309 0.05782 123 80 33 10
786 Your move 1.4309 0.04713 188 123 49 16
787 I'm not sure a relationship can be built on plague, pestilence, and death. But I'm willing to try. 1.4306 0.05275 144 93 40 11
788 I gotta remember to be less literal on my second wish." 1.4305 0.05275 151 99 39 13
789 My friends call me Lance ....... joust kidding! 1.4305 0.05520 151 102 33 16
790 I guess you are pleased that we are at a round table! 1.4304 0.05489 158 108 32 18
791 I thought your message said you were enamoured. 1.4303 0.05315 165 112 35 18
792 It's a really scary time for men right now. 1.4302 0.04884 172 112 46 14
793 "It's a little heavy, but the SPF rating is great. 1.4302 0.04814 172 111 48 13
794 So I hear you like to dance. I like to lance. A lot. 1.4302 0.04880 179 118 45 16
795 I think your text autocorrected amour. 1.4295 0.05734 149 103 28 18
796 It's just my luck to find a genie that's way too literal. 1.4295 0.05540 156 107 31 18
797 As a restaurant critic I must protect my identity. 1.4295 0.05389 156 105 35 16
798 I hate it when you go all medieval on me, Morty. 1.4295 0.05233 156 103 39 14
799 I'll be impressed when you pick up the check. 1.4295 0.04647 156 96 53 7
800 ("Note to self: Spell Check won't catch 'Seeking a pleasant knight out.'") 1.4294 0.05146 163 108 40 15
801 I'm not being defensive. You're being defensive. 1.4294 0.05502 163 113 30 20
802 You're so guarded. 1.4294 0.05146 163 108 40 15
803 This time don't leave the tip in farthings. 1.4294 0.05146 163 108 40 15
804 Well you look nothing like your profile picture either! 1.4294 0.04924 170 111 45 14
805 What kind of knight in shining amour forgets his wallet? 1.4294 0.05199 170 115 37 18
806 Your helmet looked bigger online. 1.4294 0.05132 170 114 39 17
807 It's getting hard to not feel like you're shutting me out. 1.4294 0.04853 177 116 46 15
808 Of course I love Camelot Harry. I'm just saying it couldn't hurt to see a shrink. 1.4294 0.04786 177 115 48 14
809 That's not what I meant when I asked if you had protection. 1.4286 0.05439 154 104 34 16
810 My therapist says I struggle to let myself be vulnerable. 1.4286 0.05266 161 108 37 16
811 Sorry about that. I guess I'm a little rusty. 1.4286 0.05281 154 102 38 14
812 This isn't my first round table. 1.4286 0.04964 168 110 44 14
813 So, on the third date you wear protection 1.4286 0.05361 154 103 36 15
814 I can't help feeling that you're hiding something from me, Frank. 1.4286 0.05482 161 111 31 19
815 Hey, no need to get defensive. 1.4286 0.05116 161 106 41 14
816 And the cell-phone reception is fantastic! 1.4286 0.05192 161 107 39 15
817 My profile did say I was interested in men into heavy metal, but I had something else in mind. 1.4286 0.05378 140 91 38 11
818 It's the only round table they had. 1.4286 0.04694 189 124 49 16
819 This is a very scary time for young men. 1.4286 0.04884 182 121 44 17
820 Haven't you heard? Men are under attack. 1.4286 0.05153 175 119 37 19
821 Let's get out of here, the knight is young. 1.4277 0.04932 166 108 45 13
822 You’re going to the men’s room? How long will you be gone? 1.4277 0.05220 166 112 37 17
823 Of course I’m in distress. I just don’t need rescuing. 1.4277 0.05083 159 104 42 13
824 So I see you’re into heavy metal. 1.4277 0.05161 159 105 40 14
825 Sorry, I'm looking for someone less guarded. 1.4277 0.05005 159 103 44 12
826 Safe sex, huh? 1.4276 0.05248 152 100 39 13
827 I just got out a relationship with a Renaissance man. 1.4276 0.05330 152 101 37 14
828 It's just so hard to read you sometimes. 1.4276 0.05330 152 101 37 14
829 Whaddya say we go back to my castle and I slip into my Under Armour? 1.4276 0.05427 145 96 36 13
830 When I said, "I'm into heavy metal," this isn't quite what I meant. 1.4275 0.05623 138 92 33 13
831 Well, at least they gave us a round table. 1.4270 0.04764 185 122 47 16
832 You did suggest that I wear protection... 1.4270 0.05025 178 120 40 18
833 I wish you would open up. 1.4270 0.04961 178 119 42 17
834 Knight after knight, the same thing.... 1.4268 0.05406 164 113 32 19
835 You said a knight out on the town. 1.4268 0.05194 164 110 38 16
836 Is this table round enough for you, Derek? 1.4268 0.04883 157 100 47 10
837 Sorry I'm late, I just got off the knight shift. 1.4268 0.05437 157 107 33 17
838 I'm into walks on the beach, puppies, piña coladas and Renaissance fairs. You? 1.4268 0.05048 157 102 43 12
839 I've been hurt before. 1.4268 0.05207 157 104 39 14
840 I had different expectations for a one-night stand. 1.4268 0.05362 157 106 35 16
841 When you said a knight on the town I had no idea. 1.4268 0.05362 157 106 35 16
842 Damn auto correct, I meant I wanted a NIGHT to remember. 1.4262 0.04924 183 123 42 18
843 I’m just messing with you - chivalry really is dead. 1.4261 0.04735 176 114 49 13
844 Call me your "wench" one more time and I'm going to put a size 8 chink in your armor. 1.4261 0.04936 176 117 43 16
845 You do know they're expecting rain this evening 1.4261 0.04735 176 114 49 13
846 This is a smaller round table than I'm used to. 1.4260 0.04941 169 111 44 14
847 I've been hurt a lot. 1.4258 0.05411 155 105 34 16
848 So refreshing to meet a man who looks like his online photo. 1.4255 0.05058 188 130 36 22
849 That’s odd. Why only restaurants with round tables? 1.4255 0.04769 188 125 46 17
850 Ah, amour! A much misunderstood word. 1.4253 0.04909 174 115 44 15
851 It was on sale. 1.4253 0.05108 174 118 38 18
852 Well, that's what you get for letting your phone auto-correct "date night 1.4253 0.04909 174 115 44 15
853 I'm sorry this role playing hasn't helped our marriage. 1.4251 0.04982 167 110 43 14
854 Yes, I taste the irony. 1.4251 0.05125 167 112 39 16
855 I was almost on Lancing With the Stars, you know. 1.4251 0.05195 167 113 37 17
856 Are you a fan of heavy metal? 1.4250 0.05360 160 109 34 17
857 It's really hard for me to open up to people 1.4250 0.04160 200 125 65 10
858 You wrote that you liked hot summer knights. 1.4248 0.05462 153 104 33 16
859 I wouldn’t worry about people staring if you used a straw. 1.4248 0.04462 226 153 50 23
860 Well, actually, my profile said "Middle Ages Guy"" not "middle-aged guy." 1.4246 0.05187 179 124 34 21
861 You've always had a hard time opening up. 1.4246 0.04745 179 117 48 14
862 I don't know quite how to tell you this Helen, but I've lost the key to your chastity belt. 1.4244 0.05281 172 119 33 20
863 Yes, I do have protection. 1.4244 0.04809 172 112 47 13
864 Got mail? 1.4242 0.05097 165 110 40 15
865 You're tough to read 1.4241 0.05258 158 106 37 15
866 Awkward Date Knight 1.4239 0.05022 184 126 38 20
867 YOU SEEM A LITTLE GUARDED 1.4235 0.04775 170 110 48 12
868 So, the pellet with the poison’s in the chalice from the palace? 1.4235 0.05194 170 116 36 18
869 No, I will not be your pawn. 1.4235 0.04513 196 128 53 15
870 Chivalry is dead if we split the check. 1.4233 0.05141 163 109 39 15
871 I'm fresh off a particularly combative relationship. 1.4233 0.04379 189 120 58 11
872 How long ago was your last relationship? 1.4231 0.04941 182 123 41 18
873 So tell me me about yourself, Helen of White Plains. 1.4231 0.05383 156 106 34 16
874 If we make it to a third date, maybe I’ll let you see Excalibur. 1.4231 0.04879 182 122 43 17
875 Yeah, well I thought your round table would be bigger. 1.4231 0.04422 182 115 57 10
876 Do I have "protection"? Excuse me- isn't it obvious? 1.4229 0.04953 175 117 42 16
877 A knight to remember... yes, I get it. 1.4226 0.04738 168 108 49 11
878 When I was a kid, "page not found" meant I had to carry my own sword. 1.4226 0.05373 168 117 31 20
879 You must be taking the ban on straws pretty hard. 1.4226 0.05170 168 114 37 17
880 You may be overplaying this 'men are under attack' nonsense, Stanley. 1.4226 0.05439 168 118 29 21
881 I don't let my guard down until the third date. 1.4225 0.04538 187 121 53 13
882 You seem so defensive this evening. 1.4224 0.05334 161 110 34 17
883 Since our country is returning to the middle ages I thought I would dress for it. 1.4224 0.05260 161 109 36 16
884 I said I wanted to meet a middle-aged man, not a Middle Ages man. 1.4224 0.04956 161 105 44 12
885 They say it's a dangerous time for men in America. I'm just being prudent. 1.4221 0.05511 154 106 31 17
886 Will you settle for a statistician in shining armor? 1.4220 0.04787 173 113 47 13
887 I understand your anger. The ban on straws seems to have unfairly targeted some people.” 1.4220 0.05191 173 119 35 19
888 I like a Renaissance man. 1.4220 0.04926 173 115 43 15
889 You said you were into heavy metal but.... 1.4220 0.04645 173 111 51 11
890 Usually takes a few dates before I let my guard down. 1.4219 0.04752 192 129 45 18
891 Let's call it a knight. 1.4218 0.05623 147 101 30 16
892 So, enough about me . . . 1.4217 0.05073 166 111 40 15
893 If this date turns out to be a success, would I be able call you back in, let’s say.. a fortnight? 1.4217 0.05073 166 111 40 15
894 I am done with middle-aged men 1.4216 0.04941 185 126 40 19
895 But Mom, YOU were the one who said I should always wear protection. 1.4214 0.05232 159 107 37 15
896 I worry your attitude toward women is a little medieval. 1.4214 0.04754 159 101 49 9
897 And what do you do for a living? 1.4214 0.04998 159 104 43 12
898 This isn't my first round table Carole. 1.4214 0.05155 159 106 39 14
899 So do you have any hobbies? 1.4213 0.04760 178 117 47 14
900 This isn’t going to work if you’re not ready to open up. 1.4213 0.04827 178 118 45 15
901 You know, a condom would have been just fine. 1.4213 0.04956 178 120 41 17
902 You may have heard, it's an incredibly scary time for young men. 1.4213 0.05145 178 123 35 20
903 I’m kind of a Renaissance man. 1.4213 0.04892 178 119 43 16
904 When you told me that you went to night school, I didn't realize... 1.4211 0.04966 171 114 42 15
905 Probably need to delete "chivalry a must" on my E-Harmony profile. 1.4211 0.04362 190 121 58 11
906 Look, you're a great damsel, but I'm not feeling the distress. 1.4211 0.05241 152 101 38 13
907 I know you're still thinking of Guinevere." 1.4208 0.04538 183 118 53 12
908 I was hoping you'd be less defensive. 1.4207 0.04968 164 108 43 13
909 This is nothing, you should see the round table back at my place. 1.4207 0.05189 164 111 37 16
910 No, I'm not getting a metallic taste. Just cherry and black currant. 1.4207 0.05679 145 100 29 16
911 I wanted a date night -- not a date knight. 1.4205 0.04996 176 119 40 17
912 I should have been less specific. 1.4204 0.05201 157 105 38 14
913 Just another awkward knight on the town. 1.4204 0.05356 157 107 34 16
914 Guinevere never asked to split the check. 1.4202 0.04764 188 126 45 17
915 You looked shinier in your profile pic 1.4201 0.05007 169 113 41 15
916 You wanted a knight on the town, right? 1.4201 0.05214 169 116 35 18
917 Is this just a one knight stand? 1.4201 0.05214 169 116 35 18
918 This is my first date in quite a while. I'm a little rusty 1.4200 0.05456 150 102 33 15
919 Surely you joist . . . 1.4200 0.05456 150 102 33 15
920 That really is my lance, but I am happy to see you. 1.4198 0.04575 212 144 47 21
921 So, what line of work you in? 1.4195 0.04766 174 114 47 13
922 Here's to the horse you came in on. 1.4195 0.04766 174 114 47 13
923 Well. . . my other suit had a rust stain 1.4195 0.04766 174 114 47 13
924 I also have a dungeon. 1.4194 0.04552 186 121 52 13
925 I said I wanted a date night, not date a knight 1.4194 0.05558 155 108 29 18
926 So, tell me about this rash. 1.4194 0.04979 186 128 38 20
927 I used to be a damsel in distress. Now I am just distressed. 1.4192 0.05120 167 113 38 16
928 What can I say? Love is a battlefield. 1.4192 0.05049 167 112 40 15
929 My last relationship left me feeling somewhat vulnerable. 1.4190 0.04605 179 116 51 12
930 Well, we’ve all been hurt before. 1.4190 0.04467 179 114 55 10
931 I’m putting the tin back in tinder. 1.4190 0.04805 179 119 45 15
932 I would invite you over, but I have a very early Crusade tomorrow morning. 1.4190 0.04934 179 121 41 17
933 I’m sorry if I seem defensive. 1.4189 0.05164 148 97 40 11
934 I'm sorry, I am just not into heavy metal. 1.4187 0.05355 160 110 33 17
935 I don't think I'm being defensive. 1.4186 0.04803 172 113 46 13
936 I'd thought the Dating Service had merely promised a good night. 1.4186 0.04874 172 114 44 14
937 I told you honey, it’s a scary time to be a man. 1.4185 0.04775 184 123 45 16
938 So... Are you seeing anyone? 1.4181 0.05164 177 123 34 20
939 So...umm...boxers or briefs? 1.4181 0.04843 177 118 44 15
940 A textbook example of ‘Passive-Defensive’ behavior. 1.4178 0.05121 146 95 41 10
941 Surely there are other options to quit smoking? 1.4177 0.05328 158 108 34 16
942 Why can't you get a smart phone and ignore me like a normal person? 1.4176 0.04913 170 113 43 14
943 I see that you have been hurt before... 1.4176 0.05053 170 115 39 16
944 Too literal? 1.4176 0.04812 182 122 44 16
945 Is this table round enough for you? 1.4176 0.05117 182 127 34 21
946 That’s the third selection you’ve told him has a slightly metallic taste. 1.4176 0.04684 182 120 48 14
947 Is this your first date after the Kavanaugh hearing? 1.4172 0.05588 151 105 29 17
948 I always bring protection on a second date. 1.4172 0.04985 163 108 42 13
949 If this relationship is to go forward, you've got to let your guard down.. 1.4172 0.04831 163 106 46 11
950 When I read your profile, I thought you meant heavy metal music. 1.4171 0.04539 211 143 48 20
951 I always bring protection on a first date. 1.4167 0.04894 156 101 45 10
952 I'm your knight in dining armor. 1.4167 0.05233 168 116 34 18
953 Sally suddenly realized that this would not be a one knight stand 1.4167 0.05165 168 115 36 17
954 I don't date much either. 1.4167 0.05300 156 106 35 15
955 My other suit is with the blacksmith. 1.4167 0.04881 168 111 44 13
956 Feeling a little defensive, are we? 1.4167 0.05095 168 114 38 16
957 This is my first date in a while. I'm a little rusty. 1.4167 0.04807 168 110 46 12
958 I am looking for a man who likes to cuddle. 1.4162 0.05186 173 120 34 19
959 You've been acting very defensive, lately. 1.4161 0.04871 161 105 45 11
960 Your ad clearly stated, “desparately seeking my knight in shining armor.” 1.4161 0.05028 161 107 41 13
961 Ok, Harry. I get it. Chivalry is not dead. 1.4161 0.05479 149 102 32 15
962 When you said you would be bringing protection, I never imagined that you meant this 1.4161 0.05641 137 93 31 13
963 I think you’ll find me a knight to remember. 1.4158 0.04523 202 135 50 17
964 I’m on a crusade. 1.4157 0.04688 178 117 48 13
965 I always imagined the Round Table to be a bit bigger. 1.4157 0.04688 178 117 48 13
966 Mike Pence recommended it. 1.4157 0.05067 166 112 39 15
967 Knight in shining armor-finally an online dating profile that’s accurate. 1.4156 0.05657 154 109 26 19
968 Wanda finally meets her knight in shining armor and discovers he's 53, twice-divorced, with bad credit and no retirement savings. 1.4152 0.05296 171 120 31 20
969 They always think they're soooo funny--seating us at the round table. 1.4152 0.05029 171 116 39 16
970 What is it they always say? "Be careful what you wish for!" 1.4151 0.05226 159 108 36 15
971 When I said “chivalry is dead” I just wanted you to open the door for me. 1.4151 0.04912 159 104 44 11
972 I said I believe in chivalry. I didn’t say I’d pay for dinner. 1.4145 0.04671 193 130 46 17
973 I'm glad we met up - you look exactly like your tapestry. 1.4145 0.04613 193 129 48 16
974 I'm sure you've had your share of lonely knights. 1.4145 0.05234 152 102 37 13
975 No, I don’t think you do know the meaning of Renaissance man. 1.4144 0.04566 181 118 51 12
976 Lisa quickly realized she had misspelled 'date night '. 1.4144 0.04953 181 124 39 18
977 I'm a bit of a Renaissance man. 1.4140 0.04915 186 128 39 19
978 Yes, I know you go to the bathroom “like everyone else.” I meant the logistics 1.4140 0.04672 186 124 47 15
979 Honestly, when I agreed to this, I thought you said a "night of amour"... 1.4140 0.04974 186 129 37 20
980 Magnetic, yes. Personality, not so much. 1.4138 0.04472 174 111 54 9
981 I find it hard to let my guard down. 1.4138 0.04965 174 118 40 16
982 Did you check your coat of arms? 1.4136 0.04877 191 132 39 20
983 So, did you bring protection? 1.4136 0.05651 162 117 23 22
984 Witness Protection? Why do you ask? 1.4136 0.04520 162 102 53 7
985 Not for one brief shining moment, you perv. 1.4134 0.04865 179 121 42 16
986 Why are you being so defensive? 1.4134 0.04929 179 122 40 17
987 Now I understand why you requested a round table. 1.4132 0.05253 167 116 33 18
988 It’ will never work. You’re just too guarded for me, Harold. 1.4132 0.04671 167 108 49 10
989 I’m tasting a metallic note. 1.4130 0.04832 184 125 42 17
990 Your avatar makes more sense now. 1.4129 0.04738 155 99 48 8
991 I think you’re being a bit defensive. 1.4129 0.05399 155 107 32 16
992 Guess this just another "One Knight Stand!" 1.4129 0.05399 155 107 32 16
993 If I wore protection, would you be into a one knight stand? 1.4125 0.05046 160 107 40 13
994 Your Tinder says you appreciate a man who always wears protection. And that you’re no easy conquest. 1.4125 0.04967 160 106 42 12
995 I hope it wasn't too forward of me to bring protection. 1.4125 0.05494 160 113 28 19
996 Nice to meet you, Gawain. What is your Sir name? 1.4125 0.05046 160 107 40 13
997 Flossing must be hell for you. 1.4125 0.05123 160 108 38 14
998 What a Lady, What a Knight 1.4124 0.04634 177 116 49 12
999 Well, you got your round table, but can you Uber me home? The horse was a bit much. 1.4122 0.05332 148 100 35 13
1000 Frankly, you look much older than your profile photo 1.4121 0.05012 165 111 40 14
1001 So that’s your best suit? 1.4118 0.04653 187 125 47 15
1002 That's not what I meant by a nice night out and you know it. 1.4118 0.05289 153 104 35 14
1003 In vino veritas? Surely you joust. 1.4114 0.04875 175 118 42 15
1004 Sorry. It’s laundry day. 1.4114 0.05073 175 121 36 18
1005 Oh, really? You think men are under attack? 1.4114 0.05264 175 124 30 21
1006 Cougar seeks millennial” didn’t mean the year 1000 1.4114 0.05138 175 122 34 19
1007 Yes, I wrote that in my profile but I didn’t mean it literally. 1.4114 0.04875 175 118 42 15
1008 So, do you like horses? 1.4114 0.05090 158 106 39 13
1009 So what's your plan now that straws are illegal? 1.4114 0.05322 158 109 33 16
1010 This'll probably shape up to be a one-knight stand. 1.4113 0.05700 141 98 28 15
1011 Do we always have to pick the round table? 1.4113 0.05237 141 93 38 10
1012 It looked shinier in your photo 1.4112 0.04486 197 131 51 15
1013 Mr. Vice President, I'm glad you found a way to meet with me. 1.4111 0.05032 180 125 36 19
1014 I think you have vulnerability issues. 1.4111 0.04647 180 119 48 13
1015 You said date knight. That’s what you said. 1.4111 0.04843 180 122 42 16
1016 If I'm being honest, Bertrand, half of the time I'm not sure you're even there" 1.4110 0.05274 163 113 33 17
1017 Soooo,you always carry protection. 1.4110 0.04902 163 108 43 12
1018 I have a hard time letting my guard down. 1.4110 0.05294 146 98 36 12
1019 I hope that's a glass of WD-40. 1.4108 0.04931 185 128 38 19
1020 Republican? 1.4108 0.04991 185 129 36 20
1021 Down the hatch! 1.4107 0.05089 168 115 37 16
1022 I thought it was an auto-correct mistake, but you really did mean a knight on the town 1.4107 0.05227 168 117 33 18
1023 They say it’s a very scary time for young men in America. 1.4107 0.05493 168 121 25 22
1024 Well I think you’re impenetrable too. 1.4104 0.04633 173 113 49 11
1025 They got you a round table,now what's wrong 1.4104 0.04776 173 115 45 13
1026 I guess it's a defense mechanism. 1.4103 0.05447 156 109 30 17
1027 Once a queen, always a queen but once a knight is enough. 1.4103 0.04801 195 135 40 20
1028 I know you think it's "a dangerous time to be a man", but this just makes me want to strangle you more, Hank." 1.4101 0.04614 178 117 49 12
1029 Thanks for not wearing white satin. 1.4101 0.05072 178 124 35 19
1030 Good luck. No straws are allowed in this city! 1.4101 0.05135 178 125 33 20
1031 Well, it is a round table." 1.4099 0.04702 161 104 48 9
1032 I wrote that as a metaphor. 1.4099 0.04943 161 107 42 12
1033 It's probably best you just keep it on, Brett. 1.4098 0.04658 183 122 47 14
1034 Do you always ask the maitre'd for a round table? 1.4096 0.05132 166 114 36 16
1035 My past blind dates have made me a little defensive. 1.4096 0.04839 166 110 44 12
1036 I apologize if I'm a little guarded. 1.4096 0.04839 166 110 44 12
1037 Do you always reserve a round table? 1.4096 0.05273 166 116 32 18
1038 So... what kind of work do you do? 1.4094 0.05554 149 104 29 16
1039 You say this isn't your first time at a round table? 1.4094 0.05091 171 118 36 17
1040 What makes you think I am worried about the MeToo movement? 1.4094 0.05224 171 120 32 19
1041 ‘I miss your soft side.’ 1.4094 0.04363 171 108 56 7
1042 I read it as amour. 1.4094 0.04884 171 115 42 14
1043 Your armor looked shinier in your profile pictures. 1.4094 0.04954 171 116 40 15
1044 It was right in the Antique Store window, and somehow, no one had bought it yet. Anyway, I'm Kevin. 1.4091 0.04786 176 118 44 14
1045 It really is a scary time for men! 1.4091 0.05050 176 122 36 18
1046 Chivalrous would be if you'd held the door for me. 1.4091 0.04928 154 101 43 10
1047 A condom would suffice. 1.4091 0.04985 176 121 38 17
1048 Would it have killed you to at least shine the damn suit? 1.4091 0.05180 154 104 37 13
1049 Joanne kicked herself - she'd brought regular lubricant but left the WD-40 at home. 1.4091 0.05420 154 107 31 16
1050 I do love a man in uniform 1.4091 0.05180 154 104 37 13
1051 I'm sorry, I've just been hurt too many times. 1.4088 0.04885 181 124 40 17
1052 So Lawrence, when are you coming out? 1.4088 0.04904 159 105 43 11
1053 I don't care how much you believe the wine loosens you up, you still squeak. 1.4088 0.05369 159 111 31 17
1054 I know you asked for the round table but I'd really prefer a booth. 1.4088 0.05443 159 112 29 18
1055 Don't take it personally. I prefer my Knights in white satin. 1.4086 0.05027 186 131 34 21
1056 Ok, I'm ready to talk about our relationship. 1.4086 0.04729 186 126 44 16
1057 Oh, you wanted a NIGHT to remember. 1.4086 0.04910 186 129 38 19
1058 Well you don't look like your profile picture either. 1.4085 0.05176 164 113 35 16
1059 Too literal, Frank. 1.4085 0.05030 164 111 39 14
1060 Me? I like lemon drop martinis, walks on the beach at sunset, a good book on a rainy night, and impaling heathen invaders with my trusty lance. 1.4085 0.04955 164 110 41 13
1061 When you called and told me that you'd been canned, frankly this wasn't what I was expecting. 1.4085 0.05248 164 114 33 17
1062 Why don't you ask for a straw?" 1.4085 0.05303 142 95 36 11
1063 Sylvia quickly grew to regret being the winning bidder in the "Knight on the Town" charity auction. 1.4084 0.04581 191 128 48 15
1064 I want a relationship where I can let my guard down. 1.4083 0.04995 169 115 39 15
1065 What? It's a very scary time for young men in America. 1.4083 0.04924 169 114 41 14
1066 What's your day job? 1.4083 0.04995 169 115 39 15
1067 I just don't want to get hurt, you know? 1.4083 0.04924 169 114 41 14
1068 What do you mean you can’t get through to me? 1.4083 0.04778 169 112 45 12
1069 So how long ago was your tinder picture taken? 1.4083 0.05065 169 116 37 16
1070 I always insist on a round table. 1.4083 0.05065 169 116 37 16
1071 The outfit I can deal with. It's your politics I can't stand. 1.4083 0.04704 169 111 47 11
1072 So...how was your quest? 1.4080 0.04754 174 116 45 13
1073 Just so you know, I don't joust on the first date. 1.4079 0.05058 152 101 40 11
1074 On the other hand, you're the first blind date I couldn't see right through... 1.4078 0.04728 179 120 45 14
1075 I find that hand sanitizer also works. 1.4078 0.04859 179 122 41 16
1076 Actually, I'm not a 'one knight stand' type of girl. 1.4077 0.05747 130 89 29 12
1077 They say you should always wear protection these days. 1.4076 0.05343 157 109 32 16
1078 I am working through some intimacy issues. 1.4076 0.05028 157 105 40 12
1079 To be honest,the whole knight in shining armor-chivalry narrative kind of unravelled when you insisted on separate checks. 1.4076 0.05493 157 111 28 18
1080 I thought you said,one night stand. 1.4076 0.05266 157 108 34 15
1081 Is that suit off the rack? Because I heard the guy on the rack doesn't need it anymore. 1.4074 0.05437 162 115 28 19
1082 We've been married for 40 years and I still don't really know you... 1.4074 0.05073 162 110 38 14
1083 I can see you have issues with intimacy. 1.4074 0.04761 162 106 46 10
1084 My ex said I was hard to read. 1.4072 0.04891 167 112 42 13
1085 So, I've been out of the dating scene for a while. 1.4072 0.04964 167 113 40 14
1086 The bartender here is known for his amazing screwdrivers. 1.4072 0.05036 167 114 38 15
1087 I keep my guard up on the first date 1.4072 0.05177 167 116 34 17
1088 Don’t tell me…we live happily ever after. 1.4072 0.05036 167 114 38 15
1089 Your disappointment is palpable, my lady, though — to speak truth — you’re no Guinevere either. 1.4071 0.05635 140 97 29 14
1090 Sometimes, I feel middle-aged, too. 1.4070 0.04861 172 116 42 14
1091 I'm looking for someone middle-aged 1.4070 0.04861 172 116 42 14
1092 I was really looking for something more than just a one-Knight stand. 1.4070 0.04999 172 118 38 16
1093 ...and Harold Limpkin, you're no Lancelot. 1.4068 0.04897 177 121 40 16
1094 My mother told me to use protection 1.4067 0.05190 150 101 37 12
1095 And yet you didn't hold the door for me? 1.4067 0.05103 150 100 39 11
1096 I'm a little rusty when it comes to first dates, too. 1.4066 0.04863 182 125 40 17
1097 Yes, I brought protection. Why do you ask? 1.4065 0.05314 155 107 33 15
1098 Well... how old do you think I am? 1.4065 0.05392 155 108 31 16
1099 Come to think of it, yes, I AM presently in need of rescuing. 1.4065 0.05314 155 107 33 15
1100 You don't look anything like your profile picture either. 1.4065 0.05153 155 105 37 13
1101 Can't we have just one night out when we don't fight? 1.4065 0.05071 155 104 39 12
1102 Aren't there supposed to be more of you around the table? 1.4065 0.05071 155 104 39 12
1103 I'm rethinking the whole knight-in-shining-armor thing. 1.4062 0.05039 160 108 39 13
1104 You did wish for a knight out on the town. 1.4062 0.05039 160 108 39 13
1105 I should have never told you my name is Guinevere. 1.4061 0.05079 165 113 37 15
1106 Sorry, but I like Lance a lot more. 1.4059 0.04513 202 137 48 17
1107 Need a straw? 1.4059 0.04756 170 113 45 12
1108 Forgive me but I’m a little rusty. 1.4059 0.05041 170 117 37 16
1109 I see ... You thought I said I was into "amore." 1.4057 0.04869 175 119 41 15
1110 It's a dangerous time for young men in America. 1.4057 0.04936 175 120 39 16
1111 Would it be rude to ask for a straw? 1.4057 0.04732 175 117 45 13
1112 If you were a real knight in shining armor, you wouldn't ask me to split the bill. 1.4057 0.04732 175 117 45 13
1113 I don't put it in my profile,but I'm heavy into metal..... 1.4057 0.04869 175 119 41 15
1114 No, it’s fine..I just never thought to take your profile so...literally... 1.4057 0.05068 175 122 35 18
1115 Bob, when you said you'd be wearing protection tonight, I thought you meant something else? 1.4057 0.04801 175 118 43 14
1116 Oh, Arthur, I haven't had a date knight in ages! 1.4056 0.04964 180 125 37 18
1117 Your dating profile said you were a lover, not a fighter. 1.4056 0.04436 180 117 53 10
1118 You think I'm the defensive one? 1.4056 0.04707 180 121 45 14
1119 How long has it been since your divorce? 1.4054 0.04805 185 127 41 17
1120 I checked your profile, it said you liked history and role playing. I just put the dots together. 1.4052 0.05362 153 106 32 15
1121 It's just one Knight, come on. 1.4051 0.04740 195 135 41 19
1122 This is my first time on MedievalMatch.com. 1.4051 0.05315 158 110 32 16
1123 No, actually l'm a morning person. 1.4051 0.05315 158 110 32 16
1124 Perhaps I was a little vague when I said I enjoyed heavy metal. 1.4049 0.05048 163 111 38 14
1125 I thought this was for middle age singles. 1.4048 0.05152 168 117 34 17
1126 You remind me of my first boyfriend, shiny and dull at the same time." 1.4048 0.04940 168 114 40 14
1127 When you said 'Ironman' , I though you were an athlete! 1.4048 0.04794 168 112 44 12
1128 So your sword wasn't innuendo? 1.4045 0.04875 178 122 40 16
1129 I'm sorry, I thought you knew my ex husband was a bishop 1.4045 0.04940 178 123 38 17
1130 The hardest part is finding a restaurant that will still give me a straw." 1.4044 0.04964 183 128 36 19
1131 It's your move. 1.4043 0.04688 188 128 44 16
1132 They say that once a knight is enough. 1.4038 0.05127 156 106 37 13
1133 I need to go to the men's room. Do you have a can opener? 1.4038 0.05286 156 108 33 15
1134 So when I told Alexa I needed a Night Out 1.4037 0.04936 161 108 41 12
1135 I suppose you left your wallet in your other suit of armor. 1.4037 0.04776 161 106 45 10
1136 So how was work today, Larry? 1.4037 0.05014 161 109 39 13
1137 [Run it without a caption next to Trump's remarks about how dangerous a time this is for boys and men.] 1.4037 0.05459 161 115 27 19
1138 Lately, I just can't seem to get through to you. 1.4036 0.04907 166 112 41 13
1139 So, the search for the Holy Grail led you to a wine bar? 1.4036 0.05335 166 118 29 19
1140 Really Arthur it was more of a metaphor 1.4036 0.04907 166 112 41 13
1141 I never know how to dress on a first date. 1.4036 0.04981 166 113 39 14
1142 What you may or may not have on under it is irrelevant 1.4036 0.04600 166 108 49 9
1143 Now I understand why you asked for a round table. 1.4036 0.05196 166 116 33 17
1144 I'm sorry, but I like my damsels in distress. 1.4035 0.04948 171 117 39 15
1145 It’s a dangerous time for young men. 1.4034 0.04913 176 121 39 16
1146 I’ve always wanted to meet a Renaissance man. 1.4033 0.04486 181 119 51 11
1147 I agree; the wine has a metallic taste. 1.4033 0.04752 181 123 43 15
1148 They said you’d come”someday,” but at this point, I just don’t give a damn.” 1.4029 0.05567 139 96 30 13
1149 Maybe, but inside I'm still a pirate. 1.4026 0.05090 154 104 38 12
1150 I misread your profile. I thought you were seeking a woman who was interested in amour. 1.4026 0.05334 154 107 32 15
1151 Howard, it's more the white horse that I've fantasized about. 1.4025 0.05057 159 108 38 13
1152 No, I do not want to come up to your room and see your holy grail ... 1.4025 0.05135 159 109 36 14
1153 I think you're at the wrong round table. 1.4025 0.05362 159 112 30 17
1154 Everything tastes like WD-40 to you! 1.4024 0.05097 164 113 36 15
1155 Shirley tells me you like horses... 1.4024 0.04794 164 109 44 11
1156 Where's all that 'chivalry is dead' talk now, Marge? 1.4024 0.04871 164 110 42 12
1157 No, I don't have a problem with middle-aged men. 1.4024 0.04715 164 108 46 10
1158 Tell me about your mother... 1.4024 0.04845 169 114 42 13
1159 Don't tell me that you are also wearing Under Armour. 1.4024 0.04988 169 116 38 15
1160 It's nice to finally sit down after all these centuries. 1.4023 0.04605 174 115 48 11
1161 You don't need to be so defensive. 1.4023 0.04817 174 118 42 14
1162 I've got to stop swiping right after watching Game of Thrones. 1.4023 0.04817 174 118 42 14
1163 When your dating profile said "Chivalry isn't dead," this isn't quite what I pictured. 1.4022 0.04853 179 123 40 16
1164 Sometimes it’s hard to get through to you! 1.4022 0.05043 179 126 34 19
1165 And another thing. You never let down your defenses. 1.4022 0.04632 184 124 46 14
1166 Why do you always seem so defensive? 1.4022 0.04567 184 123 48 13
1167 Well, one: it was a metaphor, and two: you're not that shiny. 1.4022 0.04632 184 124 46 14
1168 Me defensive? 1.4021 0.04728 189 130 42 17
1169 No, I wouldn't say I'm especially "in distress." Why do you ask? 1.4021 0.04546 189 127 48 14
1170 I wish you would let your guard down once in a while. 1.4014 0.04794 147 95 45 7
1171 My hobbies?? I am into vintage clothing. 1.4012 0.04753 162 107 45 10
1172 I thought you would be shinier. 1.4012 0.04912 162 109 41 12
1173 I only need a few more to take off my armor. 1.4012 0.04833 162 108 43 11
1174 I see why he insisted on a round table. 1.4012 0.04753 162 107 45 10
1175 I figured I'd find you seated at a round table. 1.4012 0.05215 162 113 33 16
1176 Not what​ I was picturing when you offered me a night out. 1.4012 0.04809 167 112 43 12
1177 All of my friends think that chivalry is dead. 1.4012 0.05308 167 119 29 19
1178 Look daggers at me all you want. It won't do any good. 1.4012 0.04640 172 114 47 11
1179 Wait, you’re an actuary too? 1.4011 0.04690 177 119 45 13
1180 I sense you have some vulnerability issues. 1.4011 0.04551 177 117 49 11
1181 Now it feels like you're getting defensive. 1.4011 0.04398 182 119 53 10
1182 This is not going to be a knight to remember. 1.4011 0.04703 187 128 43 16
1183 I always feel you’re hiding something. 1.4000 0.04895 180 125 38 17
1184 You think the waitress forgot about my straw? 1.4000 0.05123 145 97 38 10
1185 You’re not into heavy metal, are you? 1.4000 0.04848 165 111 42 12
1186 I always request a round table. 1.4000 0.04964 170 117 38 15
1187 To be frank, I'm looking for something more than just a one knight stand 1.4000 0.05335 160 113 30 17
1188 I said I wanted amour,not armor. 1.4000 0.05063 155 105 38 12
1189 You know, Toby, this ISN'T what I meant when I asked you about protection. 1.4000 0.05286 165 117 30 18
1190 Yep, it makes you look fat. 1.4000 0.04585 175 116 48 11
1191 I think Under Armour is more sexy 1.4000 0.05384 155 109 30 16
1192 You're being defensive again. 1.4000 0.04998 165 113 38 14
1193 Yeah, that pic is a couple years old. 1.4000 0.05102 170 119 34 17
1194 Well, in my defense I did say that I have an active knight life!" 1.4000 0.04738 185 127 42 16
1195 You said you wanted me to be more chivalrous! 1.4000 0.04930 175 121 38 16
1196 Thank you for reserving the round table. 1.4000 0.04771 165 110 44 11
1197 I understand some of your restaurant reviews have been controversial. 1.4000 0.05063 155 105 38 12
1198 Do I feel vulnerable after my last relationship? Why do you ask? 1.4000 0.04863 175 120 40 15
1199 Uh, you called me Guinevere again." 1.3989 0.04496 188 126 49 13
1200 I thought your profile said, “Night of Amor.” 1.3989 0.04958 183 129 35 19
1201 Don't make that face at me. 1.3989 0.04646 183 124 45 14
1202 "I asked Alexa for a nice night with an amour, so I'm guessing you're here because of autocorrection." 1.3989 0.04897 183 128 37 18
1203 If this relationship is going anywhere, you're going to have to le your guard down. 1.3989 0.04646 183 124 45 14
1204 So my ex-wife used to complain that I was too defensive about everything... 1.3989 0.04710 183 125 43 15
1205 We all have itches we'd like to scratch. 1.3989 0.04869 178 123 39 16
1206 Actually, all the tables are round. 1.3989 0.04803 178 122 41 15
1207 Why is this knight different from all other knights? 1.3988 0.05103 173 122 33 18
1208 Yes, I know what my profile said I was looking for, but you are the first guy to take me literally. 1.3988 0.05036 173 121 35 17
1209 You look nothing like your photo. 1.3988 0.04860 168 114 41 13
1210 No, Lance, I asked if you were, like, middle-aged. 1.3988 0.04933 168 115 39 14
1211 Well, your profile did say you had abs of steel. 1.3988 0.04712 168 112 45 11
1212 You meet so few "Guinivere's" on Match.com that, frankly, I was intrigued 1.3988 0.05005 168 116 37 15
1213 Really....you ordered the ‘Sir Loin’? 1.3988 0.05076 168 117 35 16
1214 And whither didst thou goest after graduate school? 1.3988 0.05188 163 114 33 16
1215 A knight out on the town sounded so good. 1.3987 0.04913 158 106 41 11
1216 I go by Gwen, now. 1.3987 0.04913 158 106 41 11
1217 You were so much more open online. 1.3987 0.04573 158 102 49 7
1218 Not what I meant when I said you need to bring protection. 1.3986 0.05316 148 102 33 13
1219 Next time, try not to make a scene about a square table. 1.3979 0.04629 191 131 44 16
1220 Maybe a glass of mead will help you loosen up. 1.3977 0.04426 171 111 52 8
1221 This wasn’t what I was expecting when my profile noted I was into heavy metal 1.3977 0.04727 171 115 44 12
1222 I guess protection is an ambiguous term. 1.3977 0.04727 171 115 44 12
1223 My fetish leans more towards scrapbooking. 1.3977 0.04579 171 113 48 10
1224 I'm a knight. We're at the round table. Your turn. 1.3976 0.05047 166 115 36 15
1225 At least I'm willing to try new things, Diane. 1.3975 0.04928 161 109 40 12
1226 I don't know about you, but I haven't been on a date in ages. 1.3975 0.04686 161 106 46 9
1227 I was speaking figuratively. 1.3974 0.05037 156 106 38 12
1228 You said to wear my best suit. 1.3974 0.05067 151 102 38 11
1229 oh, you meant a one NIGHT stand. 1.3968 0.04478 189 127 49 13
1230 Me? I'm the Brand Manager for Over Armour. 1.3968 0.04898 189 134 35 20
1231 This new straw ban must be killing you! 1.3967 0.04936 184 130 35 19
1232 Speak, that I may know you. 1.3966 0.05013 174 122 35 17
1233 So, this is date knight. 1.3966 0.04878 174 120 39 15
1234 First of all, I am not being defensive. 1.3966 0.04740 174 118 43 13
1235 Are we making eye contact yet? 1.3964 0.04837 169 115 41 13
1236 I’m always a little defensive on a first date. 1.3964 0.04537 169 111 49 9
1237 So the knight picture is not just your online avatar. 1.3964 0.04981 169 117 37 15
1238 I don’t joust on the first date. 1.3963 0.04786 164 110 43 11
1239 You're not your typical one knight stand. 1.3963 0.05089 164 114 35 15
1240 I said I wanted a date NIGHT...N-I-G-H-T! 1.3963 0.04707 164 109 45 10
1241 Go ahead, I want to see you drink it. 1.3961 0.05405 154 109 29 16
1242 I'm actually a woman so that's on you for assuming. 1.3961 0.05164 154 106 35 13
1243 I am glad that you brought protection. 1.3961 0.05326 154 108 31 15
1244 It only takes one drink for me to open up. I'm just waiting for the straw. 1.3959 0.04527 197 135 46 16
1245 What trust issues? 1.3958 0.04609 192 132 44 16
1246 I work in hardware. How about you?” 1.3958 0.05327 144 99 33 12
1247 When you said you were in the military, l guess I expected some thing else 1.3957 0.04877 187 132 36 19
1248 A "knight" to remember. Really? 1.3957 0.05268 139 94 35 10
1249 Well you said you didn't want to see me anymore 1.3956 0.04851 182 127 38 17
1250 ...and the horse you rode in on. 1.3956 0.04974 182 129 34 19
1251 Did I mention I live in a castle? 1.3955 0.04614 177 119 46 12
1252 Sorry I said 'Shut your trap'. 1.3955 0.04818 177 122 40 15
1253 A boring knight on the town. 1.3955 0.04544 177 118 48 11
1254 You're a lot rustier in person than you looked online. 1.3955 0.04884 177 123 38 16
1255 I hope you don't find my wearing protection presumptuous. 1.3953 0.04986 172 120 36 16
1256 I'm tasting black pepper, cherries and a hint of conquest. 1.3953 0.04777 172 117 42 13
1257 It’s hard for me to let my guard down. 1.3953 0.04705 172 116 44 12
1258 Don't tell me I misspelled 'date night' again. 1.3952 0.05164 167 118 32 17
1259 The counselor recommended amour, not armor! 1.3952 0.04950 167 115 38 14
1260 Yes, I can see that, but who are you underneath it all? 1.3951 0.04580 162 106 48 8
1261 You don’t look like the wench in your picture. 1.3951 0.05133 162 113 34 15
1262 Do you have a straw 1.3951 0.04904 162 110 40 12
1263 Careful what you wish for. 1.3949 0.05092 157 108 36 13
1264 So yeah, that’s how I haven’t been stung by a bee in over 35 years. 1.3947 0.05041 152 103 38 11
1265 The quest is just my day job. My real passion is wine. 1.3947 0.04953 152 102 40 10
1266 I see you still work at the Renaissance Fair. 1.3947 0.04459 190 128 49 13
1267 It protects you as well as me. 1.3946 0.04476 185 124 49 12
1268 Armor, Armani, six of one, half a dozen of another, am I right? 1.3946 0.04274 185 121 55 9
1269 I’m gonna call it a knight. 1.3944 0.04888 180 126 37 17
1270 My Friday knight was more fun. 1.3943 0.04856 175 121 39 15
1271 I said wine and amour not... oh never mind 1.3941 0.05095 170 120 33 17
1272 I hope you brought a can opener. 1.3941 0.05027 170 119 35 16
1273 I am NOT being defensive! 1.3941 0.04668 170 114 45 11
1274 I'm a little rusty. 1.3941 0.04957 170 118 37 15
1275 I know how it feels,my Spanx is killing mem,too. 1.3941 0.04814 170 116 41 13
1276 I’m just trying to get you to open up a little. 1.3941 0.04516 170 112 49 9
1277 No, no....let me guess. Intimacy issues? 1.3939 0.05064 165 115 35 15
1278 My profile said I was interested in amore not armor. 1.3939 0.04763 165 111 43 11
1279 It has been ages since I opened myself up. 1.3939 0.04916 165 113 39 13
1280 "Your dating-site profile comment about 'liking men in uniform' didn't specify which era 1.3939 0.04763 165 111 43 11
1281 So tell me more about this book, Eat. Pray. Crusade. 1.3939 0.04916 165 113 39 13
1282 Sorry, I’m a little rusty 1.3938 0.04590 193 133 44 16
1283 I’m always guarded on a first date! 1.3938 0.04763 193 136 38 19
1284 This isn't going to work of you won't just open up a little. 1.3938 0.04531 193 132 46 15
1285 Well yes, Lance, my ad did say that. 1.3938 0.04783 160 107 43 10
1286 Yes, I am a republican, how did you guess? 1.3936 0.04615 188 129 44 15
1287 It’s becoming harder for me to read your feelings. 1.3934 0.04639 183 125 44 14
1288 It's not about your dating history, madam, I always wear protection. 1.3934 0.04574 183 124 46 13
1289 Yes, I still see the chink in your armor after three drinks. 1.3933 0.05343 150 105 31 14
1290 Maybe we should just call it a night. 1.3933 0.04991 178 126 34 18
1291 What do you mean, they’ve outlawed straws? 1.3933 0.04662 178 121 44 13
1292 Actually it's Ralph, you're thinking of my brother Lance. 1.3933 0.04796 178 123 40 15
1293 You've rusted your what? 1.3933 0.04593 178 120 46 12
1294 I suppose I use it as a sort of defense mechanism. 1.3931 0.05113 145 98 37 10
1295 Sorry about the autocorrect. I meant, amore. 1.3931 0.05562 145 103 27 15
1296 It's Chateau Nottingham, 1266. 1.3931 0.04894 173 120 38 15
1297 Don't worry. I brought protection 1.3929 0.05138 168 119 32 17
1298 I said I was looking for amour not armor! 1.3929 0.05409 168 123 24 21
1299 I think we'd best call it a knight. 1.3929 0.04704 168 113 44 11
1300 What's the problem? You wanted a knight on the town. 1.3929 0.05431 140 97 31 12
1301 Since you ask, I said I was seeking "a night of amour." 1.3929 0.05207 168 120 30 18
1302 Great, another knight in shining armor. 1.3927 0.04502 191 130 47 14
1303 It is a difficult and scary time for young men in America ... 1.3927 0.04912 191 137 33 21
1304 I thought you said "knight cap". 1.3926 0.04801 163 110 42 11
1305 ...and you said I would never use it! Ha! 1.3926 0.05395 163 118 26 19
1306 It looks like another boring knight. 1.3926 0.04801 163 110 42 11
1307 It's the personal magnetism bit that worries me. 1.3924 0.05066 158 109 36 13
1308 You need to open up more. 1.3924 0.05066 158 109 36 13
1309 So tell me about yourself Mr. Kavanaugh” 1.3924 0.05066 158 109 36 13
1310 You want me to tie my scarf around your what? 1.3923 0.04673 181 124 43 14
1311 I said that I was looking for amour. 1.3922 0.05346 153 108 30 15
1312 I'm so glad they were able to get us a round table 1.3922 0.04574 204 143 42 19
1313 It's not what I expected when you said you had a "night" job. 1.3922 0.05505 153 110 26 17
1314 You're always so defensive. 1.3920 0.04601 199 139 42 18
1315 I just continue to have the feeling that you're hiding something... 1.3919 0.05220 148 102 34 12
1316 You look shinier in your photo. 1.3918 0.04863 171 118 39 14
1317 While I suspect your chivalrous heart is in the right place, I think we both can agree that your wallet is conveniently out of reach. 1.3918 0.04792 171 117 41 13
1318 Our profiles both said "into heavy metal". Not quite on the same page. 1.3918 0.05003 171 120 35 16
1319 So, how long will you be gone? 1.3918 0.04792 171 117 41 13
1320 Looks like we're both a little rusty at dating. 1.3918 0.04452 194 132 48 14
1321 Knight in shining armor was a metaphor. 1.3916 0.04966 166 115 37 14
1322 What would you wear if we had a square table? 1.3913 0.04759 161 108 43 10
1323 I know you've been hurt before, but you can open up to me. 1.3913 0.04488 184 124 48 12
1324 Your castle or mine? 1.3913 0.04554 184 125 46 13
1325 I wish you'd stop being so defensive. 1.3913 0.05075 161 112 35 14
1326 You call that activewear? 1.3911 0.04433 179 119 50 10
1327 Funny. You wear yours on the outside. 1.3911 0.04840 179 125 38 16
1328 Next time we role play, you’re the mid-level accountant. 1.3911 0.04641 179 122 44 13
1329 I think you are sitting at the wrong round table. 1.3910 0.05191 156 109 33 14
1330 I'm sorry, do you need a straw? 1.3908 0.05137 174 125 30 19
1331 I am returning from the war of the rosés. You? 1.3908 0.04871 174 121 38 15
1332 Drinking straw ban? Well this is awkward. 1.3907 0.05313 151 106 31 14
1333 If we are in a relationship, I'm going to need you to open up. 1.3906 0.04543 192 132 45 15
1334 Shall we begin in some verbal jousting? 1.3906 0.04662 192 134 41 17
1335 I thought you were going to night school. 1.3905 0.04756 169 115 42 12
1336 Gee, I thought you were just being metaphorical in your personal ad. 1.3905 0.04756 169 115 42 12
1337 98% match, my ass! 1.3905 0.04973 169 118 36 15
1338 Your breath still stinks 1.3905 0.05044 169 119 34 16
1339 You could have just asked for a bib. 1.3905 0.04756 169 115 42 12
1340 Mary couldn’t understand why her footsie attempts were not reciprocated. 1.3905 0.04973 169 118 36 15
1341 Your reservation for the round table was a very thoughtful gesture m'lady. 1.3904 0.04628 187 129 43 15
1342 Well, so far I'm still the Deputy Attorney General. 1.3902 0.05155 164 116 32 16
1343 You look rustier than your profile picture! 1.3902 0.04778 164 111 42 11
1344 I was really worried you wouldn't match your profile picture. 1.3902 0.04856 164 112 40 12
1345 The real me comes out after a few glasses of wine 1.3902 0.04856 164 112 40 12
1346 At least you requested a round table! 1.3902 0.05081 164 115 34 15
1347 So when you wrote ‘Seeking Knight in Shining Armor’ that was figuratively speaking?” 1.3901 0.04906 182 129 35 18
1348 On the plus side, male coworkers pretty much leave me alone now. 1.3901 0.04587 182 124 45 13
1349 To be perfectly honest, Ulrich, I believe I was happier when I thought chivalry was dead. 1.3901 0.04781 182 127 39 16
1350 My therapist says I’m too defensive. 1.3899 0.04880 159 108 40 11
1351 Why don't we take the horse back to my place? 1.3898 0.04877 177 124 37 16
1352 Your ex still comes here? 1.3898 0.04744 177 122 41 14
1353 Y'know, I've just about decided that it might be more convenient to just go ahead and get a flu shot. 1.3898 0.04676 177 121 43 13
1354 Agreed. You will stop saying you think Trump is great and I will stop throwing hot coffee in your face 1.3896 0.05155 154 107 34 13
1355 Hard to read? How so? 1.3895 0.04697 172 117 43 12
1356 It's our third date can you at least lift your visor? 1.3895 0.04697 172 117 43 12
1357 You were shinier in your profile picture. 1.3895 0.04840 172 119 39 14
1358 My psychiatrist said I needed better defense mechanisms. 1.3895 0.04625 172 116 45 11
1359 I don't know, it's just that you seemed more gallant at the Renaissance fair. 1.3895 0.05046 172 122 33 17
1360 You require my fealty? 1.3895 0.04576 190 131 44 15
1361 I have heard of using protection on a first date, but this is ridiculous! 1.3895 0.04696 190 133 40 17
1362 You'll enjoy a knight out, they said... 1.3893 0.05103 149 102 36 11
1363 You said you wanted a knight to remember. 1.3893 0.05529 149 107 26 16
1364 No, I’m not being defensive, you are! 1.3892 0.04868 167 115 39 13
1365 I suggested role-playing in the bedroom, not at dinner... 1.3892 0.04942 167 116 37 14
1366 Today, I'm identifying as 35% female, 25% male, and 40% sheet metal from China. 1.3892 0.05086 167 118 33 16
1367 Yeah, the visor is a pain alright, but the codpiece is what really cramps my style. 1.3892 0.04786 185 130 38 17
1368 Soooo, you said change was difficult for you. 1.3892 0.04534 185 126 46 13
1369 I said that I wanted to meet a thin man, not a tin man. 1.3889 0.05199 162 115 31 16
1370 Well I think you're the one being defensive. 1.3889 0.04973 162 112 37 13
1371 But I’m emotionally vulnerable 1.3889 0.04753 180 125 40 15
1372 Do you think they'll judge me if I ask for a straw? 1.3889 0.04973 162 112 37 13
1373 Just keep your codpiece where I can see it. 1.3886 0.04642 193 135 41 17
1374 Wine always helps me let my guard down. 1.3886 0.04848 175 122 38 15
1375 To be fair, your ad did say you were looking for a good night 1.3886 0.04780 175 121 40 14
1376 When you said you liked to joust, I assumed you meant verbally. 1.3885 0.05003 157 108 37 12
1377 I heard you have a rapier wit. 1.3885 0.05258 139 95 34 10
1378 It opens if you swipe right. 1.3882 0.04807 170 117 40 13
1379 Another iron clad alibi why you are late? 1.3882 0.04660 170 115 44 11
1380 What do you mean, I'm too defensive? 1.3882 0.05019 170 120 34 16
1381 You thought I meant a night on the town? 1.3882 0.04734 170 116 42 12
1382 Well, I think *you're* guarded. 1.3882 0.04734 170 116 42 12
1383 I’m into heavy metal. 1.3882 0.05031 152 104 37 11
1384 I'm just glad to finally get a knight out. 1.3878 0.05058 147 100 37 10
1385 I said I wanted a “date night “ not a “knight date”!!! 1.3875 0.05015 160 111 36 13
1386 I take it you've been hurt before? 1.3873 0.04881 142 94 41 7
1387 I'd always envisioned it being more - ya know - shining. 1.3873 0.04955 173 122 35 16
1388 I don’t think I can get past your defense mechanisms. 1.3871 0.04790 155 104 42 9
1389 Don’t worry, everyone feels guarded on first dates 1.3871 0.04702 155 103 44 8
1390 My mistake. I thought that app was ‘middle agers dating service.’ 1.3871 0.05209 155 109 32 14
1391 My last blind date said he was Prince Charming. 1.3871 0.05209 155 109 32 14
1392 I guess we've both decided to get back on the horse. 1.3871 0.04877 155 105 40 10
1393 I was speaking metaphorically. 1.3871 0.05209 155 109 32 14
1394 I had guessed you said to call you ‘Rusty’ because you’d have red hair. 1.3871 0.04765 186 131 38 17
1395 I wish you could be more vulnerable with me. 1.3871 0.04578 186 128 44 14
1396 I gotta be honest, I swiped right 'cause I thought it was a metaphor. 1.3871 0.05046 155 107 36 12
1397 This is why I need to dress you. 1.3869 0.04695 168 114 43 11
1398 If I hear you say this has a metallic taste one more time... 1.3869 0.04845 168 116 39 13
1399 Why do they always put me at the round table? 1.3869 0.04619 168 113 45 10
1400 My Mom made it for me when I started dating. 1.3869 0.04695 168 114 43 11
1401 You forgot to bring your straws again? 1.3869 0.04771 168 115 41 12
1402 You might want to ask for a straw. 1.3867 0.04796 181 127 38 16
1403 Look on the bright side. If I'm a knight in shining armor, then that makes you a fair maiden. 1.3867 0.04600 181 124 44 13
1404 I said I wanted "date night" not to date a knight. 1.3867 0.04600 181 124 44 13
1405 You’re not the first rough knight I’ve had! 1.3867 0.05249 150 105 32 13
1406 No, I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to call it a defense mechanism. 1.3867 0.04986 150 102 38 10
1407 When I said "Show me a night I'll never forget," this isn't what I had in mind. 1.3865 0.04948 163 113 37 13
1408 I didn’t grasp just how “old fashioned” you are. 1.3865 0.05024 163 114 35 14
1409 I meant metaphorically. 1.3865 0.04793 163 111 41 11
1410 Dating on Tinder has made me somewhat defensive." 1.3865 0.05024 163 114 35 14
1411 Shall we call it a knight? 1.3864 0.04620 176 120 44 12
1412 I know they sound the same, but I meant date "night." 1.3864 0.04893 176 124 36 16
1413 Ask for a straw. 1.3864 0.05339 132 90 33 9
1414 Hmm, have you been waiting long? 1.3862 0.04588 189 131 43 15
1415 I did promise you that it would be a Knight To Remember. 1.3862 0.04464 189 129 47 13
1416 My parents named me Lance. Why did you want to know? 1.3862 0.05103 145 99 36 10
1417 For the last time, Frank, I'm 61. You don't need protection. 1.3860 0.04711 171 117 42 12
1418 Well, my friend did say you were a Renaissance man. 1.3860 0.04638 171 116 44 11
1419 I don’t know, somehow it just feels like the same thing knight after knight. 1.3859 0.04923 184 132 33 19
1420 Honey did you remeber to put the moat bridge up before we left? 1.3859 0.04611 184 127 43 14
1421 I love these intimate moments. 1.3859 0.04611 184 127 43 14
1422 He was a dark and stormy knight. 1.3858 0.04571 197 138 42 17
1423 This is not at all what I expected when I won the “Night on the Town” contest! 1.3857 0.05514 140 99 28 13
1424 No, you can ask for a straw yourself, Brad. 1.3856 0.04648 153 101 45 7
1425 I’m a bit rusty at this. 1.3856 0.05005 153 105 37 11
1426 'Frank, usually one lets one's guard down by the 3rd date!' 1.3856 0.05174 153 107 33 13
1427 I wonder if the meat is locally slain. 1.3855 0.04958 166 116 36 14
1428 So...I can tell you're new to MedievalDating.com 1.3855 0.04958 166 116 36 14
1429 I think you're a little bit defensive. 1.3855 0.04654 166 112 44 10
1430 I told you if you put it on you wouldn't be able to take it off. 1.3855 0.05031 166 117 34 15
1431 I'm basically an introvert." 1.3855 0.04808 166 114 40 12
1432 Another knight, soon to be forgotten. 1.3855 0.04958 166 116 36 14
1433 Would you like to see my sword? 1.3855 0.04808 166 114 40 12
1434 Okay, I’m ready. What do you have to tell me? 1.3855 0.04897 179 127 35 17
1435 Do you use protection? 1.3855 0.04832 179 126 37 16
1436 No, I said that I wanted more amour in our life 1.3851 0.05066 161 113 34 14
1437 I'm waiting to hear THIS iron-clad alibi! 1.3851 0.04795 174 121 39 14
1438 I thought having a knight out on the town would be more exciting. 1.3851 0.04654 174 119 43 12
1439 Gee. I never realized the difficulties inherent in shopping for a codpiece online. 1.3851 0.04863 174 122 37 15
1440 Its full, fruity bouquet and balanced tannins are spoiled by the frankly disappointing metallic finish. 1.3846 0.05261 156 111 30 15
1441 My Job? Well, I’m currently on a quest, but the occasional pillage is rather lucrative 1.3846 0.04545 195 136 43 16
1442 You really have to fight for a table at this place. 1.3846 0.05053 143 97 37 9
1443 Would you mind if we moved to a rounder table? 1.3846 0.04512 182 124 46 12
1444 Sorry about my conversational skills. I'm a little rusty 1.3846 0.04520 169 113 47 9
1445 But I’m chainmail and you’re email, Gwen. It’ll never work. 1.3846 0.04936 156 107 38 11
1446 Didn’t your ad say you wanted a Date Knight ? 1.3846 0.04894 169 118 37 14
1447 I'm not interested in a one knight stand. 1.3846 0.05020 156 108 36 12
1448 I hope they have straws. 1.3846 0.05105 169 121 31 17
1449 Do you have a straw on you? 1.3842 0.04736 177 123 40 14
1450 So you work the knight shift? 1.3842 0.04599 177 121 44 12
1451 When you said you enjoyed metal, I thought you meant endless guitar solos. 1.3841 0.05073 164 116 33 15
1452 Do you think maybe you're being a little defensive? 1.3841 0.04847 164 113 39 12
1453 Because I'd like to be on the Supreme Court someday. 1.3841 0.05304 151 107 30 14
1454 A knight on the town? Really? 1.3841 0.05277 138 95 33 10
1455 It's a dangerous time for men. 1.3837 0.05039 172 123 32 17
1456 Are you getting a metallic aftertaste? 1.3836 0.05031 159 111 35 13
1457 If I had known you were going to wear your suit,I would have at least put on my kirtle 1.3836 0.05187 159 113 31 15
1458 As I'm sure you can guess, I've got a thing for round tables. 1.3836 0.04788 159 108 41 10
1459 And what doth a fair damsel like yourself doeth? 1.3836 0.04704 159 107 43 9
1460 Hey, YOU were the one complaining chivalry was dead. 1.3836 0.05347 146 103 30 13
1461 I know it's tacky, but I really could use a straw. 1.3834 0.04335 193 131 50 12
1462 I’m more of a day person. 1.3833 0.04613 180 124 43 13
1463 That’s not a reassuring costume for discussing the divorce, Donald. 1.3833 0.04476 180 122 47 11
1464 You should see me when I get unhinged 1.3832 0.05006 167 118 34 15
1465 Yours may be the only diet that actually works. 1.3832 0.04785 167 115 40 12
1466 So now I’M the armor-plated bitch? 1.3832 0.05006 167 118 34 15
1467 Could you ask the waiter for a straw? 1.3832 0.05078 167 119 32 16
1468 Please stop playing footsie, it's painful 1.3832 0.04632 167 113 44 10
1469 Oh - date "night". 1.3831 0.05146 154 108 33 13
1470 You're a little rusty at this dating thing, aren't you? 1.3831 0.04716 154 103 43 8
1471 I know it’s hard to let your guard down on a first date, but at least maybe you could put your visor up? 1.3831 0.05146 154 108 33 13
1472 No, I'm not getting a metallic aftertaste. 1.3829 0.04340 175 116 51 8
1473 Janet immediately regretted asking her date to bring protection...And now feared what he meant by "sword". 1.3829 0.05040 175 126 31 18
1474 ‘I’m tired of jousting with you, David. Seems that’s all you ever want to do.’ 1.3827 0.04886 162 112 38 12
1475 I believe in safe sex. 1.3827 0.04807 162 111 40 11
1476 I've been hurt one too many times.. 1.3827 0.04727 162 110 42 10
1477 When I said I liked heavy metal, I was talking about the '80's". 1.3827 0.04102 196 130 57 9
1478 Not to brag but I also carry a large sword, live in a castle and arrived here on my noble steed. 1.3825 0.04357 183 123 50 10
1479 So this is your idea of a knight out on the town? 1.3825 0.04752 183 129 38 16
1480 It's a hard one...I'd say I'm pro-environment, but I'm also pro-straw. 1.3825 0.04815 183 130 36 17
1481 Did you notice I fixed the squeaking? 1.3824 0.04576 170 115 45 10
1482 I knew we'd click, I'm wearing a chastity belt. 1.3824 0.04798 170 118 39 13
1483 This is NOT what you meant when you said to bring protection? 1.3824 0.04870 170 119 37 14
1484 Well, here we are, round table for two. 1.3824 0.04499 170 114 47 9
1485 To be honest, I had always kind of dreamed that my knight in shining armor would at least pick up the check. 1.3824 0.05148 170 123 29 18
1486 My therapist suggested removing my emotional armor, so I'm trying this. 1.3822 0.04426 191 131 47 13
1487 Most guys who read my profile have a better understanding of the concept of metaphor. 1.3822 0.05387 157 114 26 17
1488 Before this goes any further, you should know that I'm not that kind of lady-in-waiting. 1.3820 0.04714 178 124 40 14
1489 Maybe my problem is I try too hard to be what women want me to be. 1.3820 0.04781 178 125 38 15
1490 I agree. It's got a metallic taste. 1.3820 0.04714 178 124 40 14
1491 So nice of you to get us a round table for two. 1.3818 0.04746 165 113 41 11
1492 Of course I look like my profile picture under here. 1.3818 0.05120 165 118 31 16
1493 I feel like you're closing yourself off from me. 1.3818 0.04587 165 111 45 9
1494 I just wish you were more Transparent, that's all. 1.3818 0.04667 165 112 43 10
1495 Would you like to get a room for a knight? 1.3818 0.04667 165 112 43 10
1496 So,how's that metalsmithing class? 1.3816 0.05107 152 106 34 12
1497 This isn’t what I meant by a one night stand 1.3816 0.05021 152 105 36 11
1498 So, you’ll chainmail me? 1.3815 0.04739 173 120 40 13
1499 Can we go by car? TSA is an issue. 1.3815 0.04446 173 116 48 9
1500 What’s wrong with a knight on the town? 1.3815 0.04667 173 119 42 12
1501 Okay, but this is the last time: "Prithee, m'lord, I am but a country lass..." 1.3815 0.04809 173 121 38 14
1502 All right, I get it. For you, this is just a one knight stand. 1.3815 0.04947 173 123 34 16
1503 Do you use protection Arthur? 1.3814 0.04616 194 137 40 17
1504 This could be my worst date Knight ever 1.3813 0.04681 160 108 43 9
1505 You want to stop seeing me? Shirley, you joust! 1.3813 0.05006 160 112 35 13
1506 I'm not much of a talker either. 1.3813 0.04510 160 106 47 7
1507 Just admit you were cavalier with the waiter. 1.3813 0.05006 160 112 35 13
1508 Forgive my attire. I report forCNN and I'm on my way to a Trump rally. 1.3812 0.04456 181 123 47 11
1509 After my last relationship ended, I'll admit I'm a little guarded. 1.3810 0.04762 189 135 36 18
1510 Do we have to do this on a knightly basis? 1.3810 0.04836 168 117 38 13
1511 I'm afraid that this is not going to work, Phil. I just can't get through to you. 1.3810 0.04581 189 132 42 15
1512 I said bring your suit and ardor. 1.3810 0.04532 168 113 46 9
1513 I really wish you'd open up a little. 1.3810 0.05138 147 102 34 11
1514 So... you think you're the first to use a line like "Tonight's the Knight"? 1.3810 0.05260 168 123 26 19
1515 This is getting ridiculous, no body from Yale is going to recognize you 36 years later 1.3807 0.04681 176 122 41 13
1516 As your aide, Senator McConnell, I'd advise against eating out anymore, period. 1.3807 0.04750 176 123 39 14
1517 I like your suit too... Ann Taylor? 1.3806 0.05036 155 108 35 12
1518 No, really, I'm glad you wore your best suit. 1.3806 0.05119 155 109 33 13
1519 So much for thinking that "middle ages" in your profile was an autocorrect for "middle aged" 1.3806 0.05280 155 111 29 15
1520 Why so defensive? 1.3806 0.05036 155 108 35 12
1521 I heard you have an emotional support horse. 1.3806 0.05280 155 111 29 15
1522 Mister, I'm not interested in any one knight stands. 1.3804 0.04731 184 130 38 16
1523 I don't think this is going to work. You just seem too guarded. 1.3804 0.04539 184 127 44 13
1524 Let's just agree that you are only a metaphor and call it a day. 1.3804 0.04539 184 127 44 13
1525 Well, your profile did say you were old-fashioned. 1.3804 0.04282 163 106 52 5
1526 Nice try, George, but chivalry is still dead. 1.3804 0.04939 163 114 36 13
1527 I'm a big fan of safe sex. 1.3804 0.04622 163 110 44 9
1528 I don't think this'll work out. You're too defensive. 1.3804 0.04862 163 113 38 12
1529 I have to say, from your profile picture I was expecting you to be taller. 1.3803 0.05070 142 97 36 9
1530 I was just wondering how things are going with you...no need to get so defensive. 1.3803 0.05263 142 99 32 11
1531 Let us skip the small talk and get straight to the rescue. 1.3801 0.04703 171 118 41 12
1532 Late middle age is when I found my true calling. 1.3801 0.04987 171 122 33 16
1533 Congrats, you finally got your round table. 1.3801 0.04987 171 122 33 16
1534 What’s wrong? You seem a thousand years away. 1.3801 0.04478 171 115 47 9
1535 Would you be embarrassed if I asked for a straw? 1.3801 0.04847 171 120 37 14
1536 This is not what I had in mind when I asked for a night out on the town. 1.3799 0.04889 179 128 34 17
1537 ...then ask for a straw! 1.3799 0.04557 179 123 44 12
1538 So, do you joust around here? 1.3799 0.04557 179 123 44 12
1539 Just another knight to forget. 1.3797 0.04968 158 110 36 12
1540 I appreciate the dinner but I'm still not certain that I'm ready for a one knight stand! 1.3797 0.05048 158 111 34 13
1541 Martha, Sometimes a suit of armour is just a suit of armour. 1.3797 0.04803 158 108 40 10
1542 It's the standard uniform for cabinet members when dining out these days. 1.3797 0.04614 187 131 41 15
1543 Let's skip the drinks... I can't wait to get you out of that suit! 1.3796 0.05296 137 95 32 10
1544 Oh, you're Jewish? I wondered why this knight was different from all other knights," 1.3795 0.05022 166 118 33 15
1545 You look exactly like your picture . 1.3795 0.05166 166 120 29 17
1546 Yeah? Well I think that underneath that cold, hard exterior lies a cold, hard interior. 1.3795 0.05095 166 119 31 16
1547 I wanted you to feel like a princess. 1.3795 0.04403 166 110 49 7
1548 Well, you dropped your shield, but I still feel that I don't know you. 1.3793 0.05277 145 102 31 12
1549 When you said, "a night out," I had something different in mind. 1.3793 0.04426 174 117 48 9
1550 When you’re part of this administration, you have to remain incognito at restaurants.” 1.3793 0.04855 174 123 36 15
1551 Frustrating yes, but more effective than A.A. 1.3791 0.04637 182 127 41 14
1552 Darn autocorrect...I meant to type "Date Night" 1.3791 0.04702 182 128 39 15
1553 I just can’t get through to you anymore, Lance 1.3791 0.05246 153 109 30 14
1554 What makes you say I have vulnerability issues? 1.3791 0.05487 153 112 24 17
1555 It's been ages since my last date too. 1.3791 0.05164 153 108 32 13
1556 My other suit is at the cleaners. 1.3789 0.04310 190 129 50 11
1557 Can I get a straw? 1.3789 0.04622 190 134 40 16
1558 The dating service never mentioned a one-knight stand. 1.3789 0.04980 161 113 35 13
1559 Arthur, Arthur, Arthur. Why isn't it ever Lancelot? 1.3789 0.05057 161 114 33 14
1560 I usually avoid blind dates, but my therapist says I need to let down my guard. 1.3789 0.04980 161 113 35 13
1561 Well, this is not the knight I expected. 1.3787 0.04957 169 120 34 15
1562 So…how was the tournament? 1.3787 0.04739 169 117 40 12
1563 Thanks, but I slay my own dragons. 1.3786 0.05409 140 99 29 12
1564 I am guessing that your previous experiences with online dating have not been positive. 1.3785 0.04375 177 119 49 9
1565 I also believe in safe sex but this is going a bit too far. 1.3785 0.04590 177 122 43 12
1566 I said EMOTIONAL armor. 1.3785 0.04520 177 121 45 11
1567 Your profile said you were looking for amour 1.3782 0.04327 193 132 49 12
1568 You're a lot shinier in person. 1.3782 0.04327 193 132 49 12
1569 I have a drinking problem. 1.3782 0.05252 156 112 29 15
1570 I hate it when you get so defensive. 1.3782 0.05172 156 111 31 14
1571 You probably wonder what I do. 1.3780 0.05064 164 117 32 15
1572 I think you’ll need a straw. 1.3780 0.04600 164 111 44 9
1573 I thought the protection you were bringing would be more flexible 1.3780 0.04990 164 116 34 14
1574 It's been ages since my last relationship. 1.3779 0.04457 172 116 47 9
1575 I'm also emotionally guarded 1.3779 0.04457 172 116 47 9
1576 Your profile mentioned you were a little rusty at this... 1.3779 0.04963 172 123 33 16
1577 Another Knight to forget. 1.3779 0.04824 172 121 37 14
1578 Are you still errant or in town for a while? 1.3778 0.04737 180 127 38 15
1579 I understand you're into heavy metal. 1.3778 0.04671 180 126 40 14
1580 Knight takes Queen 1.3778 0.04605 180 125 42 13
1581 You need to learn to be less defensive. 1.3777 0.04716 188 134 37 17
1582 This was not the knight I had in mind. 1.3775 0.04338 204 142 47 15
1583 You said on Tinder that you came with a horse. 1.3771 0.04624 175 121 42 12
1584 Sorry if I seem a little defensive ... 1.3771 0.04254 175 116 52 7
1585 This isn't the first time I've had a memorable night at a round table. 1.3771 0.04553 175 120 44 11
1586 I don't think it'll work out for us ... Not that I don't appreciate a guy who uses protection, though! 1.3771 0.04764 175 123 38 14
1587 I know we said we’d take it slow, but I wish you’d make an effort to open up to me. 1.3770 0.04417 183 125 47 11
1588 I think you need to update your profile picture. 1.3770 0.04617 183 128 41 14
1589 No, nothing in my profile is “just an expression.” 1.3770 0.04485 183 126 45 12
1590 So you weren't just being cute when you called yourself a knight in shining armor on your dating profile? 1.3768 0.04401 207 146 44 17
1591 Oh, I thought you said Cruise. I have not been on a Crusade. 1.3768 0.05060 138 94 36 8
1592 I really only wanted a man to pull out my chair for me. 1.3766 0.04794 154 105 40 9
1593 ...and our prenup will have to be ironclad. 1.3766 0.04705 154 104 42 8
1594 It just feels like we are from different eras. 1.3765 0.04798 162 112 39 11
1595 I’m not sure why, but I’ve been told that I should let down my guard more. 1.3765 0.04798 162 112 39 11
1596 Now I see why you wanted me to reserve a round table. 1.3765 0.04716 170 118 40 12
1597 It says in your bio you like horses? 1.3765 0.04489 170 115 46 9
1598 You have your emotional armour, and I’ve got mine 1.3765 0.04489 170 115 46 9
1599 Not what I had in mind when I said I wanted a night out. 1.3765 0.04642 170 117 42 11
1600 I should have asked for details when you said you enjoyed the "nightlife". 1.3764 0.04773 178 126 37 15
1601 I presume that you're a virgin. 1.3763 0.04563 186 130 42 14
1602 This is the last time I post, “Looking for my knight in shining armor”. 1.3763 0.04689 186 132 38 16
1603 So tell me, why is this knight different from all other knights? 1.3758 0.05427 149 108 26 15
1604 I didn't fully appreciate what this place meant by 'Date Knight' 1.3758 0.04984 157 110 35 12
1605 Henry, do you have to do this every time we go to Round Table Pizza...and quit calling me Guinevere. 1.3758 0.04814 165 115 38 12
1606 You call that "shining?" 1.3758 0.05039 165 118 32 15
1607 In these times, one has to develop a tough exterior. 1.3758 0.04814 165 115 38 12
1608 I wish you would open up to me someday. 1.3758 0.04814 165 115 38 12
1609 I knew Galahad. Galahad was my friend. You,sir, are no Galahad. 1.3758 0.04814 165 115 38 12
1610 I'm sorry if I misled you, but I'm looking to be joust friends. 1.3758 0.04814 165 115 38 12
1611 Susan realized too late that she severely misunderstood "Speed Dating Knights" 1.3758 0.04965 165 117 34 14
1612 So, you agree, you have put up some barriers to intimacy. 1.3757 0.04586 173 119 43 11
1613 My social skills are a little rusty. 1.3757 0.04844 181 130 34 17
1614 I brought protection 1.3757 0.04716 181 128 38 15
1615 So, do you take the armor off before, during, or after? 1.3757 0.04650 181 127 40 14
1616 Do you have to insist on the round table every time? 1.3750 0.05114 168 122 29 17
1617 Why do you always request a round table? 1.3750 0.04742 176 124 38 14
1618 You seem a little defensive tonight 1.3750 0.04827 168 118 37 13
1619 You seem really guarded this evening. 1.3750 0.04465 184 127 45 12
1620 So, tell me your feelings about protected sex. 1.3750 0.04660 184 130 39 15
1621 I haven't dated in years so, yes, you're going to encounter some rust here and there. 1.3750 0.04834 152 104 39 9
1622 It’s been a while since I’ve been out with anyone. I might be a bit rusty. 1.3750 0.05296 144 102 30 12
1623 It’s just so hard to get people to let their guard down these days. 1.3750 0.04459 176 120 46 10
1624 If you think this is bad, wait until you see my emotional armor. 1.3750 0.04754 160 110 40 10
1625 How about a knight cap? 1.3750 0.05044 168 121 31 16
1626 Well, I did promise you a knight to remember. 1.3750 0.05182 152 108 31 13
1627 Father did always say to wear protection. 1.3750 0.04753 168 117 39 12
1628 You might need a straw 1.3750 0.04400 192 133 46 13
1629 This is not what I meant when I said I want a night out! 1.3750 0.04996 160 113 34 13
1630 I meant figuratively, not literally. 1.3744 0.04353 195 135 47 13
1631 Oh...your profile meant verbal jousting...that makes more sense. 1.3743 0.04790 187 135 34 18
1632 I didn't mention it in my profile because people are so quick to judge. 1.3743 0.04790 187 135 34 18
1633 It's a very scary time for young men. 1.3743 0.04543 187 131 42 14
1634 Really? All of this just for a "Sir Loin" joke? 1.3743 0.04685 179 126 39 14
1635 There are other ways to quit drinking. 1.3743 0.04620 171 118 42 11
1636 Is that your lance? 1.3743 0.04694 171 119 40 12
1637 ... and that then led to a regional manager position at Medieval Times. 1.3743 0.04694 171 119 40 12
1638 You're the one being defensive! 1.3743 0.04620 171 118 42 11
1639 I should have said I wanted a "day" out on the town. 1.3743 0.04767 171 120 38 13
1640 What? You asked for a knight out. 1.3743 0.04545 171 117 44 10
1641 I can’t bear to get hurt again. 1.3742 0.04852 163 114 37 12
1642 I think you greatly misunderstood your sex education teacher. 1.3742 0.05109 155 110 32 13
1643 I thought you worked FOR Under Armour 1.3742 0.05026 155 109 34 12
1644 I just feel like everyone has their guard up on first dates. 1.3741 0.04549 147 97 45 5
1645 Why should I think that this night is different from all other nights? 1.3741 0.04942 147 101 37 9
1646 Call me old fashioned, but I think a guy should dress up for a first date. 1.3741 0.04942 147 101 37 9
1647 I'm sensing that you're a bit defensive 1.3738 0.04412 206 146 43 17
1648 I was the Op-Ed Writer. 1.3737 0.04366 198 138 46 14
1649 This is the only suit I own 1.3736 0.04428 182 125 46 11
1650 Ha ha. Let me guess. Date knight? 1.3736 0.04759 182 130 36 16
1651 I thought 'Take a nice knight out.' was a typo. 1.3736 0.04563 182 127 42 13
1652 Did you just say, "Oil can" 1.3736 0.05048 174 127 29 18
1653 I meant that we should talk about your emotional armor. 1.3736 0.04491 174 119 45 10
1654 Your bio said I am in for a knight I will never forget." 1.3735 0.04556 166 113 44 9
1655 I asked for more Chianti, not Quixote. 1.3735 0.04866 166 117 36 13
1656 M'thinks we need to see other people... 1.3734 0.04792 158 109 39 10
1657 You really need to open up, Bob. 1.3734 0.04958 158 111 35 12
1658 This week has felt like an absolute battle. 1.3734 0.04958 158 111 35 12
1659 Are you going to put the visor down every time I start talking? 1.3734 0.05118 158 113 31 14
1660 If you want this to go anywhere, you're going to have to drop your guard. 1.3734 0.04792 158 109 39 10
1661 "I hate the plume." 1.3734 0.04876 158 110 37 11
1662 You don't need to be so defensive all the time. 1.3734 0.04958 158 111 35 12
1663 Nice try, but I can see right through you.... 1.3733 0.05054 150 105 34 11
1664 Another boring knight out. 1.3733 0.05054 150 105 34 11
1665 Who does your rivets? 1.3731 0.04062 193 129 56 8
1666 Chivalry schivalry, we're splitting the check. 1.3729 0.04720 177 125 38 14
1667 You need a straw? 1.3728 0.04876 169 120 35 14
1668 Well Brett, your backstory seems ironclad. 1.3728 0.04876 169 120 35 14
1669 Are you going to open up or shall I ask for a straw? 1.3728 0.04948 169 121 33 15
1670 Well I think it has a metallic aftertaste. 1.3728 0.05157 169 124 27 18
1671 When you said you were looking for a lady with polish ... 1.3727 0.05199 161 117 28 16
1672 So this is how men are protecting themselves against Me Too? 1.3727 0.05124 161 116 30 15
1673 You're probably used to a round table. 1.3727 0.04648 161 110 42 9
1674 So, I’m guessing safe sex isn’t an issue with you. 1.3727 0.04730 161 111 40 10
1675 Your voice message said you wanted a fun knight out on the town! 1.3727 0.04970 161 114 34 13
1676 Well, it's better than last Halloween when you went as a corpse. 1.3725 0.04808 153 105 39 9
1677 I hear the dragon is excellent! 1.3725 0.04897 153 106 37 10
1678 It’s just that I thought you were referring to ‘emotional armor’ in your dating profile. 1.3724 0.04888 145 99 38 8
1679 Well, you don’t exactly look like your profile picture either. 1.3723 0.04523 188 132 42 14
1680 I got hurt pretty bad when my last relationship ended. 1.3720 0.04750 164 114 39 11
1681 Enjoying date knight? 1.3720 0.04750 164 114 39 11
1682 My last date said I was a little too guarded. 1.3720 0.04590 164 112 43 9
1683 First knight jitters? 1.3720 0.04828 164 115 37 12
1684 I'm sorry, it's just that this isn't what I was expecting when you said you were a little "old fashioned." 1.3718 0.04916 156 109 36 11
1685 I must say, this isn't quite what I imagined when your dating profile described you as a renaissance man" 1.3716 0.05276 148 106 29 13
1686 So, um ... who does your plume? 1.3714 0.04543 175 121 43 11
1687 OK, I'm ready. Tell me what you thought of my play. 1.3713 0.04186 202 139 51 12
1688 It's my favorite kind of table too. 1.3713 0.04534 167 114 44 9
1689 Kudos on your thoughtfulness, but I think you missed the nuance in 'I expect you to wear protection.' 1.3713 0.04915 167 119 34 14
1690 I guess the dating site takes your requests pretty literally. 1.3713 0.05060 167 121 30 16
1691 I thought you'd be younger. 1.3713 0.04915 167 119 34 14
1692 I think we should see other people. It's been fun, but we've never seen eye-to-eye. 1.3713 0.04453 167 113 46 8
1693 Would it kill them to bring me a straw? 1.3713 0.05201 167 123 26 18
1694 When you said you worked in court I didn't picture this. 1.3713 0.04690 167 116 40 11
1695 When I asked “do you use protection”... 1.3711 0.05091 159 114 31 14
1696 That ridiculous suit of armor doesn't prove chivalry isn't dead, but it does prove that you're an idiot. 1.3711 0.05168 159 115 29 15
1697 Honestly Harold, I didn't mean that suit. 1.3711 0.05091 159 114 31 14
1698 This dump again? Of all the knights in the kingdom I had to pick Sir Tightwad. 1.3710 0.04619 186 132 39 15
1699 Enjoyed your ad, though I assumed ''knight'' was a typo. 1.3709 0.05027 151 106 34 11
1700 Darling,would you please ask the waiter for a straw. 1.3709 0.04938 151 105 36 10
1701 I’m just used to much larger round table.” 1.3708 0.04490 178 123 44 11
1702 No, you smile first. 1.3708 0.04490 178 123 44 11
1703 You could ask for a straw. 1.3708 0.04630 178 125 40 13
1704 Chivalry is not dead, just tired 1.3708 0.04490 178 123 44 11
1705 So tell me-- how long have you had the nickname "Rusty"? 1.3706 0.05221 143 101 31 11
1706 No, honey, I said date NIGHT. 1.3706 0.05063 170 124 29 17
1707 Is this going to be a good knight or a bad knight? 1.3706 0.04480 170 116 45 9
1708 As my profile says, I'm into heavy metal. 1.3706 0.04707 170 119 39 12
1709 I know you prefer round tables, but I'd prefer a booth. 1.3706 0.04632 170 118 41 11
1710 Your logic is ironclad. 1.3706 0.04321 170 114 49 7
1711 So, do you like jousting? 1.3704 0.05022 162 116 32 14
1712 Seriously? 1.3704 0.04441 189 132 44 13
1713 I know my profile said "seeking knight in shinning armor" but I was hoping for a little more shine and a little less armor. 1.3704 0.04945 162 115 34 13
1714 You don't look like your profile pic. 1.3701 0.04957 154 108 35 11
1715 After my divorce, my friends say I've been a bit guarded. 1.3701 0.04871 154 107 37 10
1716 Don’t you think your “anonymous reviewer” disguise is going too far? 1.3699 0.05065 173 127 28 18
1717 Check, mate. 1.3699 0.04792 173 123 36 14
1718 My ad said I enjoy verbal jousting. 1.3699 0.04721 173 122 38 13
1719 Your armor isn’t as shiny as your profile pic. 1.3699 0.05052 146 102 34 10
1720 Must the table always be round? 1.3699 0.05144 146 103 32 11
1721 Well, this certainly makes it harder to determine if you’re really 45. 1.3698 0.04330 192 133 47 12
1722 I'll show you what’s under mine if you show me what ’s under yours, 1.3697 0.04648 165 114 41 10
1723 You do realize, that when I said in my profile I wanted to meet my knight in shining armor, that was just a figure of speech, don't you? 1.3697 0.04880 165 117 35 13
1724 Marcie considered the empty flea market suit of armor quietly rusting across the table from her and concluded that this was neither the best blind date nor the worst. 1.3697 0.04804 165 116 37 12
1725 Yes, I DID have to reserve a round table. 1.3697 0.04403 165 111 47 7
1726 Right…so you ARE a knight and this IS a round table.” 1.3697 0.04403 165 111 47 7
1727 My profile clearly says I tend to be a little protective. 1.3696 0.04181 184 124 52 8
1728 Really Ted, there’s no need to be so defensive. 1.3696 0.05641 138 101 23 14
1729 Do we have to sit at a round table? 1.3694 0.04973 157 111 34 12
1730 I know love is a battlefield, but was this really necessary? 1.3694 0.04806 157 109 38 10
1731 My Mama said there'd be knights like this. 1.3694 0.05055 157 112 32 13
1732 Long walks on the beach are actually a bit difficult, but I do like piña coladas. 1.3694 0.04720 157 108 40 9
1733 Pillage here often? 1.3694 0.04890 157 110 36 11
1734 Well you're the one who said I should be more armorous! 1.3693 0.04522 176 122 43 11
1735 Our problem is that I'm a morning person and you're a knight person. 1.3693 0.04664 176 124 39 13
1736 Date knight? So you're a professional pun? 1.3693 0.04868 176 127 33 16
1737 Thank goodness! You look just like your picture! 1.3693 0.04377 176 120 47 9
1738 You're not very open are you? 1.3690 0.04818 168 119 36 13
1739 You looked shinier in your pictures. 1.3690 0.04818 168 119 36 13
1740 The dating site DID promise a night to remember." 1.3690 0.04432 168 114 46 8
1741 I suppose this is a knight I'll never forget. 1.3690 0.04743 168 118 38 12
1742 I appreciate this Jerry, but what would you have done if I'd asked you to be my Rock? 1.3690 0.04667 168 117 40 11
1743 I never go on a date without protection. 1.3690 0.04667 168 117 40 11
1744 I detect metallic notes. 1.3690 0.04471 187 131 43 13
1745 I thought you promised me a “night” I wouldn’t forget. 1.3690 0.04471 187 131 43 13
1746 Is this your idea of a date knight? 1.3687 0.04826 160 112 37 11
1747 Well, at least there won't be any awkward good night kiss business. 1.3687 0.04660 160 110 41 9
1748 When I said I wanted a night out on the town, this wasn't what I had in mind. 1.3687 0.04907 160 113 35 12
1749 I've been told I'm emotionally guarded. 1.3687 0.04254 179 121 50 8
1750 You’re acting very defensive tonight. 1.3687 0.04540 179 125 42 12
1751 I get the feeling you’re still not ready to commit. 1.3687 0.04743 179 128 36 15
1752 With a disapproving glance, Roy's date let him know he'd chosen the wrong suit for the evening. 1.3687 0.04608 179 126 40 13
1753 I have a bigger round table back at my place. 1.3687 0.04299 198 138 47 13
1754 Sorry I'm late, I came straight from my knight class. 1.3684 0.04302 171 115 49 7
1755 Not your idea of a knight out? 1.3684 0.04912 152 106 36 10
1756 Lately you seem so closed off. 1.3684 0.04999 152 107 34 11
1757 I am NOT defensive! 1.3684 0.04381 171 116 47 8
1758 I’m going as an accountant. You? 1.3684 0.04684 171 120 39 12
1759 My ex-husband called me a battle ax, so yes, I think we are made for each other. 1.3681 0.04555 182 128 41 13
1760 My psychologist says it's a defense mechanism. 1.3681 0.03986 182 120 57 5
1761 You say you are a Supreme Court nominee? 1.3681 0.05219 163 120 26 17
1762 I don't care if the "knight is young" but I'd rather go home now. 1.3681 0.04763 163 114 38 11
1763 Because you told me to wear my best suit. 1.3681 0.05097 144 101 33 10
1764 Let me guess. This isn't your first online date! 1.3681 0.05375 144 104 27 13
1765 "Lest this first date be also the last I wouldst now see thee raise thy glass and too thy visor, buddy boy." 1.3681 0.05553 144 106 23 15
1766 Are you on guard with all women or just now that you are on the Supreme Court? 1.3681 0.05375 144 104 27 13
1767 Arthur, I think calling me defensive is your projection. 1.3679 0.04495 193 137 41 15
1768 I admit that when I read your profile, I thought it was just an expression when you said you were a crusader. 1.3678 0.04555 174 121 42 11
1769 It’s harder now that bars have stopped offering straws. 1.3678 0.04628 174 122 40 12
1770 Why couldn't we just get a square table like everyone else? 1.3678 0.04699 174 123 38 13
1771 Who says that chivalry is dead? 1.3678 0.04482 174 120 44 10
1772 I wouldn’t have gone out with you if I’d known you were so defensive. 1.3678 0.04838 174 125 34 15
1773 They don't have straws here anymore. 1.3677 0.05098 155 111 31 13
1774 Great time to ban straws... 1.3677 0.04758 155 107 39 9
1775 I'll keep drinking until you're shining. 1.3677 0.05015 155 110 33 12
1776 See, Mildred, chivalry is NOT dead! 1.3677 0.04669 155 106 41 8
1777 If you see the waiter again, ask for a straw? 1.3677 0.05098 155 111 31 13
1778 No need to be so defensive. 1.3677 0.04845 155 108 37 10
1779 So ask the damn waiter for a straw! 1.3677 0.05015 155 110 33 12
1780 Don't give me that look. You said you needed a knight out. 1.3676 0.04502 185 130 42 13
1781 I thought you’d be shinier. 1.3675 0.04930 166 119 33 14
1782 I'm always a little cautious on a first date." 1.3675 0.05004 166 120 31 15
1783 You're not what I had in mind when I said I wanted a good night out. 1.3675 0.04856 166 118 35 13
1784 Some people say I am a bit defensive. 1.3675 0.04780 166 117 37 12
1785 I think we ought to call it a knight. 1.3673 0.05206 147 105 30 12
1786 Shirley was beginning to regret agreeing to date knight. 1.3673 0.05206 147 105 30 12
1787 At that moment, she knew that metaphor was not her friend. 1.3673 0.05382 147 107 26 14
1788 The dating scene these days is a real battlefield. 1.3672 0.04642 177 125 39 13
1789 You look just like your picture 1.3672 0.04711 177 126 37 14
1790 Yes, it comes in High Shine and also in Matte finish. 1.3672 0.04572 177 124 41 12
1791 “Je t'aime mon armor” 1.3671 0.05107 158 114 30 14
1792 Shut your face! 1.3671 0.05028 158 113 32 13
1793 Your armor isn't as shiny as it is in your profile. 1.3671 0.04865 158 111 36 11
1794 My profile clearly stated that I’m looking for amour ... NOT ARMOR! 1.3671 0.04947 158 112 34 12
1795 Chivalry might not be dead, but this date is. 1.3670 0.04761 188 137 33 18
1796 Doris always preferred a quiet date knight. 1.3670 0.04515 188 133 41 14
1797 After this glass of wine, maybe we can go back to my place for a knight cap. 1.3669 0.05079 169 124 28 17
1798 You seem very guarded! 1.3669 0.04794 169 120 36 13
1799 People often tell me I’m too guarded on first dates. 1.3669 0.04568 169 117 42 10
1800 Nice suit, but ties are required. 1.3669 0.04491 169 116 44 9
1801 No, Harold, we're not getting a warhorse. 1.3667 0.04786 180 130 34 16
1802 Well you don't look anything like your picture either" 1.3667 0.04380 180 124 46 10
1803 Where I come from, it's not considered presumptuous to bring protection on a first date. 1.3667 0.04953 150 105 35 10
1804 Is this what you meant by knightcap? 1.3667 0.05131 150 107 31 12
1805 I said I wanted a night in Ann Arbor! 1.3667 0.04654 180 128 38 14
1806 It has notes of apricot and fig, with just a hint of tin and zinc" 1.3665 0.04465 191 135 42 14
1807 Wow, we're both into 17th century British poetry! 1.3663 0.04514 172 119 43 10
1808 Your profile said the armour would be shining. 1.3663 0.04806 172 123 35 14
1809 Honestly, from your profile I expected a bit more luster. 1.3661 0.04534 183 129 41 13
1810 Dr. Weintraub said I needed better psychological armor. But we settled for this. 1.3660 0.04796 153 106 38 9
1811 What? It's my best suit! 1.3660 0.04885 153 107 36 10
1812 Maybe I do say "literally" too often. 1.3660 0.04973 153 108 34 11
1813 You're late. 1.3660 0.04476 194 138 41 15
1814 I feel safer in it since that whole Kavanaugh thing. 1.3659 0.05119 164 120 28 16
1815 One can not be too careful when ordering steak flambe. 1.3659 0.04413 164 111 46 7
1816 It was supposed to be a metaphor. 1.3659 0.04740 164 115 38 11
1817 First date in a long while? 1.3659 0.04971 164 118 32 14
1818 I hate date knight. 1.3659 0.05119 164 120 28 16
1819 So if you're up on your tetanus shots, I was thinking we could head back to my place... 1.3659 0.04660 164 114 40 10
1820 Damned auto-correct - my Tinder post was for an exciting night 1.3657 0.04606 175 123 40 12
1821 I understand from your profile that you're a little shy. 1.3657 0.04534 175 122 42 11
1822 You say "armor," I say "amore." 1.3656 0.04483 186 131 42 13
1823 What do you say we take this to my place for a Knight-cap 1.3656 0.04483 186 131 42 13
1824 I haven't been out in ages. Sorry if I'm a bit rusty. 1.3654 0.04905 156 110 35 11
1825 Do we have to joust over the bill again?! 1.3654 0.04555 156 106 43 7
1826 Damn spellcheck. Next time I will say "evening" preferred. 1.3654 0.04905 156 110 35 11
1827 If you say, "Mmpphhht uffa gishhes" one more time, I'm going to scream 1.3653 0.05051 167 122 29 16
1828 Well, my guard is up too, buddy. 1.3653 0.04906 167 120 33 14
1829 I am wondering about your concept of safe sex. 1.3653 0.04906 167 120 33 14
1830 Awfully defensive, aren’t you? 1.3652 0.04621 178 126 39 13
1831 Don't think that after one glass of wine we'll be having a one-knight stand. 1.3652 0.04689 178 127 37 14
1832 Why do we always have to dine at a round table? 1.3652 0.04756 178 128 35 15
1833 I'm leaving you for someone shinier. 1.3652 0.04621 178 126 39 13
1834 I assume you will be expecting a “good knight” kiss? 1.3652 0.04481 178 124 43 11
1835 You might want to update your profile picture 1.3652 0.04410 178 123 45 10
1836 Hope you didn't mind the long wait, but I only sit at round tables. 1.3651 0.04432 189 133 43 13
1837 So, what do you do when you're not jousting? 1.3651 0.05475 126 89 28 9
1838 I hear you, but I still feel this is something of an overreaction to the #MeToo movement. 1.3649 0.05436 148 109 24 15
1839 Marge decided then that this would be her last knight out. 1.3648 0.04840 159 112 36 11
1840 Do we always have to sit at this round table? 1.3648 0.05002 159 114 32 13
1841 You don't look like your profile picture. 1.3647 0.04697 170 120 38 12
1842 Tannins? What tannins? I get subtle hints of face mask. 1.3647 0.04771 170 121 36 13
1843 Sorry. I never joust on the first date. 1.3646 0.04633 181 129 38 14
1844 You know, this isn't the first round table I've sat around. 1.3646 0.04430 181 126 44 11
1845 No Frank, I am looking for "le grand amour"... 1.3643 0.05664 140 104 21 15
1846 Frank, I said date NIGHT, not date knight. 1.3642 0.04926 151 106 35 10
1847 Well I think you're being a little defensive. 1.3642 0.05012 162 117 31 14
1848 Shall I ask the sommelier to bring you a straw? 1.3642 0.04696 162 113 39 10
1849 This isn't what I pictured when you said "Date Knight" 1.3642 0.05012 162 117 31 14
1850 Next time the dating app tells me "you've got mail" I'll take it more seriously. 1.3642 0.04856 162 115 35 12
1851 I was hoping you would let your guard down this evening 1.3642 0.04640 173 122 39 12
1852 Here's hoping for a knight to remember. 1.3642 0.04852 173 125 33 15
1853 Am I correct? You majored in medieval history. 1.3642 0.04640 173 122 39 12
1854 I just like to hear you say ,'Good Night' and mean it. 1.3642 0.04782 173 124 35 14
1855 It's my response to the #MeToo movement. 1.3642 0.04712 173 123 37 13
1856 You never shine it like you used to. 1.3641 0.04770 184 134 33 17
1857 This isn't what I meant when I asked for a date night 1.3636 0.04946 154 109 34 11
1858 What makes you think I need rescuing? 1.3636 0.04655 176 125 38 13
1859 I don’t feel like being feudal tonight, Marty 1.3636 0.04590 187 134 38 15
1860 Spell-check got it wrong. I wanted a unique night out 1.3636 0.05436 154 115 22 17
1861 I have some battle scars from my last relationship. 1.3636 0.04681 154 106 40 8
1862 Would a straw help? 1.3636 0.04398 187 131 44 12
1863 Actually, when you called and asked, 'How about a knight on the town?', I misunderstood. 1.3636 0.05165 165 122 26 17
1864 What makes you say I'm guarded? 1.3636 0.04870 165 118 34 13
1865 My friend told me I should wear some protection. 1.3636 0.04655 176 125 38 13
1866 So you just sit at any round table you see? 1.3636 0.05113 143 101 32 10
1867 I just feel like there's this barrier between us... 1.3636 0.04513 176 123 42 11
1868 Are you going to open up, or should I order you a straw? 1.3636 0.04716 165 116 38 11
1869 When is the food coming? We‘ve been waiting for centuries. 1.3636 0.04870 165 118 34 13
1870 I'm not wearing underpants. 1.3632 0.04659 190 138 35 17
1871 It’s not me, it’s you. 1.3631 0.04530 179 126 41 12
1872 I’m just saying, a real knight in shining armor would’ve asked if I preferred the Chardonnay. 1.3631 0.04461 179 125 43 11
1873 Well, people use to say I was too thin-skinned. 1.3631 0.04461 179 125 43 11
1874 I'm squeaking. Order something oily. 1.3631 0.04599 179 127 39 13
1875 I thought you said you liked old-fashioned guys 1.3631 0.04461 179 125 43 11
1876 I want a divorce. 1.3631 0.04657 168 118 39 11
1877 I wish you’d let your guard down. 1.3631 0.04733 168 119 37 12
1878 Mama told me to use protection when I started dating." 1.3631 0.04580 168 117 41 10
1879 I'm not sure this is working out, Rupert. I sense a little defensiveness. 1.3631 0.04795 157 110 37 10
1880 The 80's called, Karen. They want their shoulder pads back. 1.3631 0.05203 157 115 27 15
1881 So basically, you’ll get chivalry back, and I’ll get to own all the land and tax everyone. 1.3626 0.04546 182 129 40 13
1882 Alice said that it’d be a knight to remember. I wish that she’d said it in writing. 1.3626 0.04677 182 131 36 15
1883 Margaret, I wish you could just see past my defenses. 1.3626 0.04478 182 128 42 12
1884 I think I'm taking a shine to you 1.3626 0.04341 182 126 46 10
1885 Rook to queen bishop 4, unless you have other moves in mind. 1.3626 0.04612 182 130 38 14
1886 Well you are wearing something different from your online profile picture, too. 1.3626 0.04478 182 128 42 12
1887 What do you think of heavy metal? 1.3626 0.04341 182 126 46 10
1888 I’m just not ready to commit to a relationship that includes a horse. 1.3626 0.04410 182 127 44 11
1889 I should have asked for a straw. 1.3626 0.04890 171 124 32 15
1890 My name is Galahad but my friends call me Rusty. 1.3626 0.04600 171 120 40 11
1891 A knight cap - I know what you’re thinking. 1.3625 0.04975 160 115 32 13
1892 I mean, no one’s dating profile is perfectly accurate. 1.3624 0.04686 149 102 40 7
1893 I know you have a problem with showing your true self but I thought you meant emotionally... 1.3624 0.04876 149 104 36 9
1894 If you don't want to be seen with me, there are other ways. 1.3624 0.04876 149 104 36 9
1895 You know, if this relationship is ever going to work, you need to let your guard down. 1.3624 0.04968 149 105 34 10
1896 Chivalry is not dead. It's being re-enacted. 1.3622 0.04319 196 138 45 13
1897 I've dated guys with emotional walls but, this is ridiculous. 1.3622 0.04428 185 130 43 12
1898 No , not really. You don't seem all that unhinged to me. 1.3621 0.04689 174 124 37 13
1899 Sorry Martha, I cheated on you! 1.3621 0.04829 174 126 33 15
1900 Some people reminisce about the days of yore. I do something about it. 1.3620 0.04753 163 115 37 11
1901 I used to be much more guarded. 1.3620 0.04672 163 114 39 10
1902 Go ahead, ask the sommelier. I’m telling you 1297AD was NOT a very good year. 1.3618 0.05243 152 111 27 14
1903 Every time I bring this up you get so defensive. 1.3617 0.04313 188 131 46 11
1904 When I said I was interested in the Renaissance I really just meant the art. 1.3616 0.04633 177 126 38 13
1905 And I thought chivalry was dead. 1.3616 0.04633 177 126 38 13
1906 Not that kind of crusade. 1.3616 0.04633 177 126 38 13
1907 So… I can remove it on the 3rd date? 1.3616 0.04633 177 126 38 13
1908 something tells me this is going to be a one knight stand. 1.3614 0.05067 166 122 28 16
1909 It’s nothing personal. It’s just that my ISO ad was for a Renaissance man. 1.3614 0.04614 166 116 40 10
1910 Sticks and stones my ass. 1.3614 0.04846 166 119 34 13
1911 It's hard for me to catch the waiters' eye, could you ask for a straw? 1.3614 0.04846 166 119 34 13
1912 I don't normally brag, but I'm kind of a Rennaisance man. 1.3614 0.04614 166 116 40 10
1913 Frankly, you looked shinier on Tinder. 1.3614 0.04614 166 116 40 10
1914 It's fine. You're just less shining than your photo. 1.3614 0.04614 166 116 40 10
1915 I told you they wouldn't have straws here. 1.3614 0.04614 166 116 40 10
1916 Where I come from, this is business casual 1.3613 0.04834 155 109 36 10
1917 Keep the lance down,Trevor. 1.3613 0.05004 155 111 32 12
1918 Nobody ever remembers my face but they always remember my name.. 1.3613 0.04657 155 107 40 8
1919 M'lady, what, pray, is a "Medieval Dickweed"? 1.3613 0.05087 155 112 30 13
1920 auto correct changed 'where's your email' to 'wear your mail?' 1.3611 0.04777 180 131 33 16
1921 Long thought dead, Chivalry returns to the dating scene. 1.3611 0.05084 144 102 32 10
1922 Bad hair day again Edna 1.3611 0.04789 144 99 38 7
1923 This isn't what I was expecting when I read that you liked heavy metal in your profile. 1.3609 0.04784 169 121 35 13
1924 So when your profile said "man of steel" you weren't kidding. 1.3609 0.04784 169 121 35 13
1925 Your armor was shinier in your profile picture. 1.3609 0.04238 169 114 49 6
1926 My profile did promise a knight to remember. 1.3608 0.05097 158 115 29 14
1927 This isn't my first one knight stand 1.3608 0.04854 158 112 35 11
1928 When will you come out? 1.3608 0.05097 158 115 29 14
1929 “Besides Dungeons and Dragons what else do you do for fun?” 1.3608 0.04598 158 109 41 8
1930 You're afraid they'll recognize you from what incident? 1.3608 0.04770 158 111 37 10
1931 Do yoou need a straw? 1.3607 0.04458 183 129 42 12
1932 I was hoping you'd agree to a one-knight stand with me ... 1.3605 0.05103 147 105 31 11
1933 No, really. I want to hear about YOUR day. 1.3605 0.05194 147 106 29 12
1934 Are you still seeing Lance?" 1.3605 0.04866 172 125 32 15
1935 See? They DID have a round table! 1.3605 0.04578 172 121 40 11
1936 It's just been so long since I had a knight out 1.3605 0.04350 172 118 46 8
1937 So then King Arthur says, “how many knights does it take to change a light bulb?” 1.3605 0.04866 172 125 32 15
1938 I'm afraid I have a hard time letting my guard down. 1.3605 0.04725 172 123 36 13
1939 I said I was looking for Mr. RIGHT. 1.3605 0.04503 172 120 42 10
1940 You tweeted for a knight to remember. 1.3605 0.04725 172 123 36 13
1941 I'm weating a chastity belt in the same color 1.3605 0.04866 172 125 32 15
1942 Should I order a straw for you? 1.3605 0.04427 172 119 44 9
1943 Not bad, but I prefer the blood of my enemies 1.3605 0.04503 172 120 42 10
1944 It’s a dangerous time to be a young male in America. 1.3602 0.05027 161 117 30 14
1945 which personal pronoun do you prefer? 1.3602 0.04342 186 130 45 11
1946 And, as for me, I can be somewhat defensive. 1.3602 0.04538 186 133 39 14
1947 Your profile said you were taller. 1.3600 0.04667 175 125 37 13
1948 To be honest, when I posted on TINDR for a Knight in Shining Armor, I had Jon Hamm in mind. 1.3600 0.05119 150 108 30 12
1949 Of all the things to ban, it had to be straws. 1.3600 0.04737 175 126 35 14
1950 I'm guessing you've been wounded by past speed-dating experiences. 1.3600 0.05205 150 109 28 13
1951 Didn't you say you wanted a knight out? 1.3600 0.04849 150 105 36 9
1952 Jeff Flake at dinner. 1.3598 0.04649 164 115 39 10
1953 How long has it been since you've had a knight out? 1.3598 0.04649 164 115 39 10
1954 I thought you'd be on a horse. 1.3598 0.04807 164 117 35 12
1955 We'll do a gender reveal when the check comes. 1.3598 0.04960 164 119 31 14
1956 Sorry, when it comes to blind dates, I'm a little rusty. 1.3598 0.04807 164 117 35 12
1957 So then-you’re not gonna believe this-the kid actually pulls the sword out of the stone! 1.3598 0.04729 164 116 37 11
1958 Sorry, I can already tell this won’t be a knight to remember. 1.3596 0.04747 178 129 34 15
1959 #metoo really got you spooked, huh? 1.3596 0.04471 178 125 42 11
1960 Chivalry IS dead. I'm just cosplaying. 1.3596 0.04253 178 122 48 8
1961 Damn auto-correct for a romantic knight with protection." 1.3596 0.04879 178 131 30 17
1962 Sorry... I left my wallet in my other armor 1.3596 0.04327 178 123 46 9
1963 Can you wait just a minute while I slip into something more comfortable? 1.3595 0.04961 153 109 33 11
1964 Too much? 1.3595 0.04693 153 106 39 8
1965 YOU can ask the waiter for a straw! 1.3595 0.05296 153 113 25 15
1966 Online dating always feels so feudal to me. 1.3595 0.04784 153 107 37 9
1967 It’s been six years, Marvin. The ‘I’m your knight in shining armor’ thing is getting old.” 1.3593 0.04591 167 117 40 10
1968 Rita suddenly realizes her fairy godmother has taken her wish literally. 1.3593 0.04746 167 119 36 12
1969 I never said it'd be THE Round Table. 1.3591 0.04279 181 125 47 9
1970 My date next week? A scarecrow apparently. 1.3591 0.04624 181 130 37 14
1971 I was expecting more than one knight at the round table... 1.3591 0.04420 181 127 43 11
1972 Your argument that chivalry isn’t dead is oddly compelling. 1.3590 0.04357 156 105 46 5
1973 I'm so glad they could give us a round table 1.3590 0.04893 156 111 34 11
1974 When you said you would have to show up in your work clothes, I wasn't expecting this. 1.3590 0.04808 156 110 36 10
1975 Just because you're A knight in shining armor doesn't make you MY knight in shining armor. 1.3588 0.04833 170 123 33 14
1976 No. I don’t believe it’s a “scary time” for men. Check please! 1.3588 0.04905 170 124 31 15
1977 First, I'd like to hear about the knightly specials. 1.3588 0.04761 170 122 35 13
1978 Defensive? What makes you think I'm defensive? 1.3587 0.04505 184 131 40 13
1979 Tonight's the Knight 1.3587 0.04505 184 131 40 13
1980 Did you know that the Middle Ages were really called the Dark Ages because there were too many knights? 1.3586 0.05421 145 107 24 14
1981 My last Crusade also went poorly. 1.3585 0.04574 159 110 41 8
1982 Now I know why your nickname is Rusty. 1.3585 0.04745 159 112 37 10
1983 I can see you took my dating profile quite literally. 1.3584 0.04630 173 123 38 12
1984 Are you jousting me? 1.3583 0.04389 187 132 43 12
1985 So.......joust much? 1.3581 0.04890 148 104 35 9
1986 So you seem to be a little rusty at this speed dating thing. 1.3581 0.05164 148 107 29 12
1987 I've been craving a nice knight out on the town. 1.3581 0.05252 148 108 27 13
1988 I’m just working on my knight moves. 1.3581 0.05074 148 106 31 11
1989 It’s a dangerous time to be a young man. 1.3580 0.04845 162 116 34 12
1990 I bet you're one of those guys who feels weird about taking their socks off too. 1.3580 0.04766 162 115 36 11
1991 Wow, Scott, you take #ThrowBackThursdays to a whole new level. 1.3580 0.04845 162 116 34 12
1992 The dress code here is casual, not chivalrous. 1.3580 0.04766 162 115 36 11
1993 You always get so guarded when we talk about your childhood 1.3580 0.04924 162 117 32 13
1994 Must you clank with each sip? 1.3580 0.04430 176 123 43 10
1995 Your were shinier on Tinder 1.3580 0.04574 176 125 39 12
1996 You haven't touched your wine. 1.3580 0.04503 176 124 41 11
1997 Well, I did wish for a memorable night. 1.3580 0.04430 176 123 43 10
1998 Note to self, remove "attracted to men in suits" from my profile. 1.3580 0.04574 176 125 39 12
1999 But Brett, you could have ordered beer. As you say, ‘Everybody likes beer,’ and no one will recognize you in that get-up. 1.3580 0.04982 176 131 27 18
2000 So what happened after you and the Lady of the Lake broke up? 1.3579 0.04144 190 131 50 9
2001 I didn't know Brooks Bros. had a blacksmith's shop. 1.3576 0.04705 165 117 37 11
2002 Do you mind if I finish your wine? 1.3575 0.04658 179 129 36 14
2003 Mom, there’s something you should know about me. 1.3575 0.04658 179 129 36 14
2004 I still think make-up would cover that birthmark. 1.3571 0.04536 182 130 39 13
2005 When I asked you to bring protection I was referring to condoms! 1.3571 0.05176 140 100 30 10
2006 You're my first date knight ever. 1.3571 0.04847 154 109 35 10
2007 Maybe my profile put a little too much emphasis on chivalry. 1.3571 0.05019 154 111 31 12
2008 Thank you again for requesting a round table. 1.3571 0.04603 182 131 37 14
2009 What do you mean, "I'm emotionally unavailable"? 1.3571 0.04187 196 137 48 11
2010 I dub thee Sir Merlot-a-lot. 1.3568 0.04549 185 133 38 14
2011 Well, you said you wanted a knight to remember. 1.3568 0.04549 185 133 38 14
2012 Love is a battlefield. 1.3567 0.04664 171 122 37 12
2013 I think I've been taking too many iron supplements. 1.3567 0.04809 171 124 33 14
2014 I know. I know. The round table was so much bigger back then. 1.3567 0.04664 171 122 37 12
2015 How do you feel about long walks on the beach? 1.3567 0.04590 171 121 39 11
2016 Sorry, but I 'm thinking this may only be a one-knight stand. 1.3567 0.04737 171 123 35 13
2017 This is my first knight out in a long time. 1.3567 0.04590 171 121 39 11
2018 My doctor told me to always use protection 1.3567 0.04590 171 121 39 11
2019 Sorry, I know I can be a little guarded on a first date. 1.3567 0.04867 157 112 34 11
2020 oil can oil can oil can 1.3567 0.04697 157 110 38 9
2021 You look nothing like your profile picture 1.3567 0.04609 157 109 40 8
2022 So, Lance, just exactly, how long have you and this... this Guinevere person been seeing each other? 1.3567 0.04867 157 112 34 11
2023 So, are you having a good 'knight' so far? Ha ha ha.....sorry, joust joking! 1.3567 0.04867 157 112 34 11
2024 I, on the other hand, am feeling rather vulnerable. 1.3564 0.04304 188 132 45 11
2025 I never bring a can opener on the first date. 1.3563 0.04750 174 126 34 14
2026 Your profile said you were guarded, but... 1.3563 0.04461 174 122 42 10
2027 Nothing will get through to you. 1.3563 0.04461 174 122 42 10
2028 You got yourself into that mesh, you can get yourself out. 1.3563 0.04461 174 122 42 10
2029 I thought Sir Lancelot was just your screen name 1.3562 0.04803 160 114 35 11
2030 When I said I was looking for a knight in shining armor, I meant it metaphorically. 1.3562 0.04803 160 114 35 11
2031 All I can think of is that the tin man didn't have a heart. 1.3562 0.04931 146 103 34 9
2032 Just so we're clear, there will be no castling queenside. 1.3562 0.04835 146 102 36 8
2033 But it's vintage WD-40. 1.3562 0.05119 146 105 30 11
2034 You look a lot different in person, actually. 1.3560 0.04630 191 140 34 17
2035 I enjoy long walks on the beach at sunset, candlelit dinners, and jousting. 1.3559 0.04336 177 123 45 9
2036 This is not what I meant when I asked you to be more chivalrous. 1.3559 0.04336 177 123 45 9
2037 Would it be wrong for me to admit that I'm imagining you naked? 1.3559 0.04827 177 130 31 16
2038 I get lubricated about once a week.... 1.3559 0.04262 177 122 47 8
2039 Let me explain what I meant by "date night." 1.3559 0.04623 177 127 37 13
2040 I am a bit old-fashioned. 1.3558 0.04898 163 118 32 13
2041 I'm glad we went with the round table. 1.3557 0.05393 149 111 23 15
2042 Think of me as being a lot like a lobster dinner... 1.3557 0.04474 149 101 43 5
2043 So, you want to get medieval tonight? 1.3557 0.04276 194 137 45 12
2044 Glad you picked an Italian place--I only eat spaghetti. 1.3557 0.04459 194 140 39 15
2045 Have you had difficult first dates before? 1.3556 0.05201 135 96 30 9
2046 Is that proposal iron-clad? 1.3556 0.04636 180 130 36 14
2047 The K is silent 1.3554 0.04274 166 113 47 6
2048 In hindsight, it may have been a bad idea to schedule this date on laundry day. 1.3554 0.04523 166 116 41 9
2049 It's always so hard to let your guard down on first dates. 1.3554 0.04099 166 111 51 4
2050 Does it chafe? 1.3554 0.04759 166 119 35 12
2051 I’m too old for you, Jill. 1.3554 0.04523 166 116 41 9
2052 What I’m really looking for is someone who’s emotionally available. You? 1.3553 0.04797 152 107 36 9
2053 All right, so why are we feeling vulnerable this time? 1.3552 0.04449 183 130 41 12
2054 I can see myself in you. 1.3552 0.04311 183 128 45 10
2055 That thing I said on my dating profile was just a figure of speach. 1.3552 0.04449 183 130 41 12
2056 You can wear that for the rest of your life, but I'm still not watching Game of Thrones with you! 1.3552 0.04647 183 133 35 15
2057 So you're a knight of the round table and still live with your parents? 1.3552 0.04516 183 131 39 13
2058 I said night cap. 1.3551 0.05018 138 97 33 8
2059 Well do you have any interest in verbal jousting? 1.3550 0.04547 169 119 40 10
2060 Perhaps a little jousting could break the ice. 1.3550 0.04308 169 116 46 7
2061 Well, this hasn't exactly been a night to remember for me, either. 1.3550 0.04774 169 122 34 13
2062 I hope you’re not drinking and jousting! 1.3550 0.04547 169 119 40 10
2063 Wow, this is a first—you look the same in person as you did on Tinder. 1.3550 0.04699 169 121 36 12
2064 Date knights just aren't what they used to be. 1.3550 0.04774 169 122 34 13
2065 My Knight in dining armor! 1.3548 0.04907 155 111 33 11
2066 When was the last time you got a shine? 1.3548 0.04553 155 107 41 7
2067 And even dressed like that Trump still grabbed you by the p_ _ _y? 1.3548 0.04464 186 133 40 13
2068 After years of online dating, Norma figured anything was better than another knight home alone. 1.3548 0.04992 155 112 31 12
2069 It's just..." "I know." "I mean...on the phone..." "Yes, I know." "I mean, when you said Knight School I assumed... 1.3548 0.04779 186 138 30 18
2070 Can you hear me now? 1.3548 0.04821 155 110 35 10
2071 Would you like me to ask the waiter for a bendy straw? 1.3547 0.04568 172 122 39 11
2072 Your profile said, "Damsel in distress seeks her knight in shining armor...? 1.3547 0.04786 172 125 33 14
2073 I'm pretty sure that in your dating profile, you spelled 'night-owl' without the 'k'. 1.3547 0.04856 172 126 31 15
2074 I thought you said it was date knight! 1.3547 0.04493 172 121 41 10
2075 Oh? So look who's calling me defensive! 1.3546 0.04945 141 99 34 8
2076 So, this is your idea of a knight cap. 1.3544 0.05085 158 116 28 14
2077 I can't help but feeling you have your guard up since your divorce. 1.3544 0.04924 158 114 32 12
2078 You asked for a date knight. 1.3544 0.04842 158 113 34 11
2079 No. I'm not in distress and, no, you can't join me. 1.3544 0.04672 158 111 38 9
2080 I know I asked for a "date knight", but ... 1.3544 0.04758 158 112 36 10
2081 Let's just leave it at 'knight and day', you aren't the one. 1.3543 0.04727 175 127 34 14
2082 I was hoping you'd order the Sir Loin. 1.3543 0.04586 175 125 38 12
2083 I'm into safe sex. 1.3543 0.04864 175 129 30 16
2084 I said I wanted a night with amour ... 1.3540 0.04938 161 117 31 13
2085 Well...this will be the last time I use checkmate.com... 1.3540 0.04613 161 113 39 9
2086 You must be from the rust belt, right? 1.3540 0.04613 161 113 39 9
2087 Ar you always this defensive? 1.3540 0.04697 161 114 37 10
2088 I thought you said you wanted to meet someone with mettle. 1.3540 0.04938 161 117 31 13
2089 So you don't recommend the sword fish ? 1.3539 0.04242 178 123 47 8
2090 Sorry, sorry. Your profile did say, 'A Knight in Shining Armour,' I - well - I just didn't take it that literally that's all. 1.3537 0.04998 147 105 32 10
2091 So what brings you to the middle-age mixer? 1.3537 0.04808 147 103 36 8
2092 You’re so guarded. I just really don’t know how to get through to you. 1.3537 0.04796 164 118 34 12
2093 I take safe sex very seriously! 1.3537 0.04637 164 116 38 10
2094 I like jousting, shining my armor and killing small animals with my sword. And you? 1.3537 0.04556 164 115 40 9
2095 I'm assuming the waitress will come back with a straw... 1.3537 0.04473 164 114 42 8
2096 It's bullet-proof, arrow-proof, cannon ball-proof, water-proof, snake proof, AND I can use either men's or women's bathroom. 1.3536 0.04410 181 128 42 11
2097 I can tell what you're thinking--my armor was shinier in the profile picture. 1.3533 0.04743 150 105 37 8
2098 I think the “shining armor” thing is a metaphor 1.3533 0.04501 167 117 41 9
2099 I find the wine has a metallic finish. 1.3533 0.04658 167 119 37 11
2100 I think you're afraid of letting your guard down 1.3533 0.04152 184 127 49 8
2101 It was amour at first sight. 1.3532 0.04288 201 144 43 14
2102 I told you, chivalry isn't dead. 1.3526 0.04201 190 133 47 10
2103 I warned you that I have a pretty exciting knight life. 1.3526 0.04471 173 122 41 10
2104 Doesn't matter, I'm going to hurt you with my words 1.3526 0.04763 173 126 33 14
2105 I'm getting metallic notes. 1.3526 0.04546 173 123 39 11
2106 Fiscal liberal, social conservative 1.3526 0.04709 156 110 37 9
2107 Welcome to the Supreme Court secretarial staff. You'll need to get your grope-free armor before you start on Monday. 1.3526 0.05129 156 115 27 14
2108 Too bad they phased out straws. 1.3526 0.04965 156 113 31 12
2109 Thanks for agreeing to meet me right after work. 1.3526 0.04796 156 111 35 10
2110 I have to be honest, when it comes to dating I tend to put my guard up. 1.3526 0.04796 156 111 35 10
2111 Anything happen at work today ? You seem rather guarded. 1.3523 0.04345 176 123 44 9
2112 My divorce was brutal. 1.3523 0.04420 176 124 42 10
2113 Every anniversary I feel deeper regret that we got married on Halloween. 1.3521 0.05582 142 107 20 15
2114 It's a scary time to be a man today. 1.3520 0.04421 196 142 39 15
2115 Now I understand why your profile says you are a knight person. 1.3520 0.04648 179 130 35 14
2116 Just my luck, I've got mail. 1.3519 0.04990 162 119 29 14
2117 You're the one who wanted the round table! 1.3519 0.04913 162 118 31 13
2118 I’ll see if they can get you a straw. 1.3519 0.04834 162 117 33 12
2119 What a knight. 1.3518 0.04196 199 141 46 12
2120 I just got off work and didn't have time to change. 1.3518 0.04315 199 143 42 14
2121 I don't care, I'm asking for a straw. 1.3517 0.05228 145 106 27 12
2122 I really miss straws. 1.3516 0.04659 182 133 34 15
2123 Do you notice a strong metallic aftertaste? 1.3515 0.04694 165 118 36 11
2124 If you see the waiter, can you ask him to bring me a straw? 1.3515 0.04772 165 119 34 12
2125 Early into the small talk Julie sensed this was going to be an awkward kinght 1.3514 0.05151 148 108 28 12
2126 It's only a pimple. 1.3514 0.04475 185 133 39 13
2127 I use protection 1.3514 0.04475 185 133 39 13
2128 You look different from your profile picture. 1.3514 0.04342 185 131 43 11
2129 I thought your online, 'Knight in Shining Armor' shtick was a come on. 1.3512 0.04712 168 121 35 12
2130 Round Table for two. 1.3512 0.04787 168 122 33 13
2131 Is it awkward in here or is it me? 1.3512 0.04787 168 122 33 13
2132 A straw? Really, Harold? 1.3512 0.04712 168 121 35 12
2133 I'll tell the waiter 'check, mate.' 1.3512 0.05005 168 125 27 16
2134 Why are you being so guarded? 1.3511 0.04294 188 133 44 11
2135 Apologies, m’lady, I’m a little rusty. 1.3510 0.04990 151 109 31 11
2136 Now, tell me, are you a dark and stormy knight? 1.3509 0.04940 171 127 28 16
2137 You know I meant "knight in shining armor" figuratively, right? 1.3509 0.05009 171 128 26 17
2138 I thought you were looking for a Renaissance man. 1.3509 0.04503 171 121 40 10
2139 You have a beautiful smile. 1.3509 0.04799 171 125 32 14
2140 I’ve always preferred the metaphor. 1.3509 0.04727 171 124 34 13
2141 No, my mighty stallion wasn't a metaphor. 1.3506 0.05091 154 113 28 13
2142 You look shinier in person than on Tinder. 1.3506 0.05007 154 112 30 12
2143 I'm glad we don't have to use chopsticks. 1.3506 0.04563 154 107 40 7
2144 What, not shining enough for you? 1.3506 0.04563 154 107 40 7
2145 Why so defensive Bill? 1.3506 0.04597 174 125 37 12
2146 There will be no jousting tonight. 1.3506 0.04597 174 125 37 12
2147 the dog's dead; the scarecrow had a stroke, the lion's still a wimp, and you've hidden my oil can again. I think it's time we called it quits. 1.3506 0.04524 174 124 39 11
2148 I think you misunderstood when I said I wanted a night out. 1.3505 0.04451 194 141 38 15
2149 You know knight in shining armor is just a metaphor, right? 1.3503 0.04770 157 112 35 10
2150 I always thought of Middle Age as a state of mind... 1.3503 0.04399 177 125 42 10
2151 Finally, a quiet knight out. 1.3500 0.04626 180 131 35 14
2152 It's a dangerous time to be a man. 1.3500 0.04538 160 112 40 8
2153 Why do you say I always keep my guard up? 1.3500 0.04451 160 111 42 7
2154 You could always ask the waitress for a straw 1.3500 0.04420 180 128 41 11
2155 Chivalry may be dead, but I still find the attire surprisingly comfortable. 1.3500 0.04708 160 114 36 10
2156 Does my handsome knight in shining armor need a straw? 1.3500 0.04538 160 112 40 8
2157 Did you lie about your age on Match.com? 1.3500 0.04538 160 112 40 8
2158 Same way as when nature calls. Why do you ask? 1.3500 0.04558 180 130 37 13
2159 I always bring protection on dates... just in case. 1.3500 0.04708 160 114 36 10
2160 When my friend said you worked at a museum, I thought maybe you were a tour guide. 1.3497 0.04159 183 127 48 8
2161 I find your attitude quite cavalier. 1.3497 0.04086 183 126 50 7
2162 It was much shinier in your Profile Photo. 1.3497 0.04572 183 133 36 14
2163 Maybe the bartender has a straw.” 1.3497 0.04730 163 117 35 11
2164 Day off at the museum? 1.3497 0.04567 163 115 39 9
2165 I was hoping for a little more "Shining" and a little less "Armor." 1.3497 0.04398 163 113 43 7
2166 Personally, I believe your story, but I can only rescue damsels who have a corroborating witness. 1.3495 0.04646 186 137 33 16
2167 Maybe it was a mistake to take our Role-playing public. 1.3495 0.04519 186 135 37 14
2168 A straw would be nice. 1.3494 0.04429 166 116 42 8
2169 I guess this wasn’t the night either of us had in mind. 1.3494 0.04670 166 119 36 11
2170 I am generally cautious on my first dates. 1.3494 0.04429 166 116 42 8
2171 I have to confess, I wasn't completely honest in my profile pic. 1.3494 0.04511 166 117 40 9
2172 Don't be so defensive. 1.3494 0.04591 166 118 38 10
2173 Just so you know, I don't want to have kids. 1.3493 0.04917 146 104 33 9
2174 Well this won't be a knight to remember. 1.3492 0.04469 189 137 38 14
2175 I'm vulnerable. 1.3491 0.04836 169 124 31 14
2176 But I don't care about the difference in our ages. 1.3491 0.04688 169 122 35 12
2177 Back to your castle for a knight-cap? I don't think so. 1.3491 0.04457 169 119 41 9
2178 Why are you so defensive? 1.3491 0.04535 169 120 39 10
2179 It was hard to find a women's helmet that allowed my pony tail through 1.3490 0.05033 149 108 30 11
2180 Run out of clean clothes? 1.3490 0.05210 149 110 26 13
2181 First Knight out? 1.3490 0.04481 192 140 37 15
2182 Middle Age 1.3490 0.04294 192 137 43 12
2183 I thought it was misspelling when it read, ".....for a knight to remember." 1.3488 0.04557 172 123 38 11
2184 Be careful of what you wish for. 1.3488 0.04775 172 126 32 14
2185 You don't happen to have a straw, do you? 1.3488 0.04557 172 123 38 11
2186 I thought chivalry was dead. 1.3486 0.04575 175 126 37 12
2187 So they're telling me chivalry is dead. 1.3486 0.04575 175 126 37 12
2188 It's not your opinion on the divine rights of kings that's the dealbreaker. It's your take on the usefulness of heavy cavalry in the age of the machine gun that is really hurtful. 1.3486 0.04278 175 122 45 8
2189 I think I'm gonna need a straw. 1.3486 0.04646 175 127 35 13
2190 Lance, I know it's a round table, but really... 1.3486 0.04646 175 127 35 13
2191 So...when ya from? 1.3486 0.04646 175 127 35 13
2192 Another awkward first date at the Holy Bar & Grail 1.3486 0.04503 175 125 39 11
2193 My ex wasn't of the highest calibur. 1.3486 0.04716 175 128 33 14
2194 No offence but my date match description said I enjoyed a good NIGHT with a glass of wine. 1.3484 0.04980 155 113 30 12
2195 So, do you ever sit at square table? 1.3484 0.04631 155 109 38 8
2196 I thought you said this was dress casual. 1.3484 0.05145 155 115 26 14
2197 This is nice. I haven't had a knight out in quite a while! 1.3483 0.04591 178 129 36 13
2198 Well, my profile did say ‘Renaissance Man’. 1.3483 0.04379 178 126 42 10
2199 Is this your first date with another woman? 1.3481 0.05185 135 97 29 9
2200 Do you think he forgot my straw? 1.3481 0.04994 158 116 29 13
2201 I prefer it over the house arrest. 1.3481 0.04659 158 112 37 9
2202 Sorry, I'm a little rusty at this 1.3481 0.04745 158 113 35 10
2203 It's a round table. 1.3481 0.04659 158 112 37 9
2204 I'm not getting you a straw 1.3481 0.04469 181 130 39 12
2205 And here I thought 'respond to my emaille address' was just a typo. 1.3478 0.04847 161 117 32 12
2206 My profile's ideal man? I was using an analogy. 1.3478 0.04684 161 115 36 10
2207 Your Silver Singles profile mentioned nothing about liking heavy metal. 1.3478 0.04351 184 131 42 11
2208 I asked the Genie for a knight in shining armor who turns into a stallion in the bedroom. Shall we order some sugar cubes ? 1.3478 0.05082 161 120 26 15
2209 I was hoping to catch you off guard. 1.3478 0.05310 138 101 26 11
2210 If it's alright with you, let's start the role play after dinner. 1.3476 0.04290 164 113 45 6
2211 I just have always been more of a knight person. 1.3476 0.04784 164 119 33 12
2212 I am keen to get out there and really open up to someone. 1.3476 0.04784 164 119 33 12
2213 I guess my ordering a rusty nail wasn't funny 1.3476 0.05013 164 122 27 15
2214 You did reserve the round table, right? 1.3476 0.04862 164 120 31 13
2215 And I was so hoping to break the cycle of dating guarded men 1.3476 0.04461 164 115 41 8
2216 Would you say you're more of a Lance-a-lot or a Lance-a-little? 1.3476 0.05087 164 123 25 16
2217 Most of my friends thought that just a condom would be fine but I thought I might need to take it to the next level. 1.3475 0.05131 141 102 29 10
2218 I'm not calling you sir. 1.3474 0.04124 190 133 48 9
2219 This is taking 'wear protection on the first date' a little too far! 1.3473 0.04799 167 122 32 13
2220 It's just not... shining. 1.3473 0.04724 167 121 34 12
2221 I'm just a little surprised because you weren't wearing a helmet in your profile picture. 1.3473 0.04568 167 119 38 10
2222 Didst thy ad not sayeth 'Woman Seeking Renaissance Man'? 1.3473 0.04799 167 122 32 13
2223 I'm just out here, looking for my damsel in distress. 1.3473 0.04241 167 115 46 6
2224 If you don't want a kiss, just say so! 1.3472 0.05056 144 104 30 10
2225 I expected something different from "a night on the town." 1.3471 0.05024 170 128 25 17
2226 You won't need all that protection. I have a chastity belt. 1.3471 0.04954 170 127 27 16
2227 After my divorce, friends said I should get right back up on that horse. What's your story? 1.3471 0.04356 170 119 43 8
2228 I'm waiting for the right woman to let my guard down. 1.3471 0.04194 170 117 47 6
2229 Thank you, but I'm no longer in distress. 1.3471 0.04513 170 121 39 10
2230 Dammit Bill, just because it's a round table doesn't mean you to have dress up. 1.3471 0.04513 170 121 39 10
2231 It's my defense mechanism. 1.3471 0.04436 170 120 41 9
2232 You really should learn to let your guard down 1.3471 0.04356 170 119 43 8
2233 Is it me, or does this wine have a metallic aftertaste? 1.3469 0.04168 196 139 46 11
2234 My chastity belt is in the shop. 1.3469 0.04595 147 102 39 6
2235 Chivalry is still dead. 1.3468 0.04460 173 123 40 10
2236 So, this is the big deal round table you've been bragging about! 1.3468 0.04608 173 125 36 12
2237 I'm sorry, but I was speaking metaphorically in my ad. 1.3468 0.04608 173 125 36 12
2238 Brett, you've been confirmed. I think you can relax now. 1.3468 0.04752 173 127 32 14
2239 My profile was supposed to read that I enjoyed "nights" along with a glass of wine. 1.3467 0.04365 199 145 39 15
2240 Guess who’s going commando? 1.3466 0.04762 176 130 31 15
2241 Maybe next time we could go somewhere less formal. 1.3466 0.04408 176 125 41 10
2242 Gladys was determined to have a good knight. 1.3466 0.04694 176 129 33 14
2243 My friends were right, they told me this wasn’t going to be my knight. 1.3466 0.04963 176 133 25 18
2244 Nasty divorce? Something tells me you're not ready to start dating again. 1.3466 0.04481 176 126 39 11
2245 So this is your idea of a night to remember? 1.3464 0.04666 153 108 37 8
2246 I have a problem with trust. 1.3464 0.04758 153 109 35 9
2247 I don't know about the damsel part, but you do seem in distress." 1.3464 0.04500 179 129 38 12
2248 But your ad said, "Wanted, knight in shining armor..." 1.3464 0.04705 179 132 32 15
2249 You said there'd be dragons. 1.3464 0.04358 179 127 42 10
2250 So, you say your hobbies are archery and bird watching? Surely you joust! 1.3464 0.04705 179 132 32 15
2251 This is not what I meant by wining and dining with a night on the town. 1.3462 0.05197 156 117 24 15
2252 Mainly, I wear it to save on dry cleaning. 1.3462 0.04606 156 110 38 8
2253 You looked younger online. 1.3462 0.04953 156 114 30 12
2254 It was worth the wait, to get this round table. 1.3462 0.04516 182 132 37 13
2255 Ohh, that type of Renaissance man. 1.3459 0.04465 185 134 38 13
2256 Well, at least you don’t pretend to be open and available. 1.3459 0.04331 185 132 42 11
2257 ... maybe you should open up more? 1.3459 0.04193 185 130 46 9
2258 It's time that we open up to one another. 1.3459 0.04193 185 130 46 9
2259 It's not your shielding, Herm, it' your emptiness. 1.3459 0.04331 185 132 42 11
2260 Did you specifically ask for a round table" 1.3459 0.04886 159 116 31 12
2261 You seem a little too guarded, even for a first date. 1.3459 0.04720 159 114 35 10
2262 This was your idea. Don’t you dare ask for a straw. 1.3457 0.04350 188 135 41 12
2263 I'm always a little shy on first​ dates too. 1.3457 0.04577 162 115 38 9
2264 No, I'm not going to ask them for a straw. 1.3457 0.04493 162 114 40 8
2265 In a couple of weeks, Senator Cruz, this #MeToo thing will all blow over. 1.3455 0.04837 165 121 31 13
2266 But your online profile said you liked hard bodies! 1.3455 0.04913 165 122 29 14
2267 This explains the part in your profile about an interest in Heavy Metal. 1.3455 0.04521 165 117 39 9
2268 I take it this is your way of telling me you're afraid of commitment. 1.3455 0.04760 165 120 33 12
2269 Well, hash tag Sir Lancelot, you certainly fooled me. 1.3455 0.04760 165 120 33 12
2270 The last time I let down my walls? They stormed the castle. 1.3455 0.04521 165 117 39 9
2271 It seems like I haven't dated since the dark ages... I have to admit I'm a bit rusty. 1.3455 0.04521 165 117 39 9
2272 Darling, now we can talk about your mother! 1.3455 0.04913 165 122 29 14
2273 No problem, I never kiss on the first date anyway. 1.3454 0.04130 194 137 47 10
2274 Sorry, it’s not going to work. You’re tarnished. 1.3452 0.04546 168 120 38 10
2275 You'll have to excuse the echo. 1.3452 0.04467 168 119 40 9
2276 I find it hard to let my guard down on a first date 1.3452 0.04546 168 120 38 10
2277 I know I SAID I was searching for my knight in shining armor! 1.3452 0.04700 168 122 34 12
2278 And I thought my ex had emotional armor. 1.3451 0.04901 142 101 33 8
2279 Marvin, he has no idea what “fercula dant meliora“ means. Just ask to see the menu. 1.3451 0.05002 142 102 31 9
2280 Well, the part of your profile about the shining armor was right. 1.3450 0.04567 171 123 37 11
2281 I was hoping this knight would be special. 1.3450 0.04414 171 121 41 9
2282 You don't have to be so defensive ! 1.3450 0.04491 171 122 39 10
2283 Check, please. 1.3448 0.04729 174 128 32 14
2284 Your overt display of chivalry has been duly noted. 1.3448 0.04363 174 123 42 9
2285 joust a gigolo! 1.3448 0.04832 145 103 34 8
2286 You look a lot older than on your Tinder profile. 1.3448 0.04732 145 102 36 7
2287 I did the chain mail thing, but that was before I really knew myself. 1.3448 0.04439 174 124 40 10
2288 I've always thought that "clothes make the man." 1.3448 0.04513 174 125 38 11
2289 I'm a bit of a germophobe. 1.3446 0.04532 177 128 37 12
2290 Actually I thought you said amour not armor... 1.3446 0.04671 177 130 33 14
2291 No problem, I'll just drink it for you. 1.3446 0.04460 177 127 39 11
2292 Am I not your knight in dining armor? 1.3446 0.04807 177 132 29 16
2293 So... what do you do for work? 1.3446 0.04163 177 123 47 7
2294 It’s important for me to feel safe on a first date. 1.3446 0.04862 148 106 33 9
2295 I could ask the waiter for a straw for you! 1.3446 0.04862 148 106 33 9
2296 I must warn you. I'm feeling a little chivalrous tonight. 1.3444 0.04193 180 126 46 8
2297 "In your profile picture, your armor was shining. 1.3444 0.04748 180 134 30 16
2298 This is not what I meant by a night to remember. 1.3444 0.04887 151 109 32 10
2299 I though you said you worked the night shift. 1.3444 0.04976 151 110 30 11
2300 This is not quite what I meant when I said I needed a night out. 1.3444 0.04976 151 110 30 11
2301 No, I said I wanted a night out. 1.3443 0.04496 183 133 37 13
2302 I dunno Arthur, I guess I just need some me time. 1.3443 0.04291 183 130 43 10
2303 So,I guess in your dating profile, "S.W.M" meant " surrounded with metal"? 1.3443 0.04220 183 129 45 9
2304 Yes, I know it's not shining, but I can change. 1.3442 0.04641 154 109 37 8
2305 When I said men were stuck in the Middle Ages when it came to women’s rights, I didn’t mean literally. 1.3442 0.04994 154 113 29 12
2306 Your cross-dressing I've patiently lived with George... but this? 1.3439 0.04926 157 115 30 12
2307 It's not my fault, you're the one who told me to bring protection. 1.3439 0.04757 157 113 34 10
2308 You know, you're not the first woman to tell me I have intimacy issues. 1.3439 0.04307 157 108 44 5
2309 You're taking the 'wear protection' advice very seriously. 1.3439 0.04671 157 112 36 9
2310 As long as your house really is a castle, I'm good. 1.3438 0.04779 160 116 33 11
2311 Ok, but no lube jobs til the 3rd date. 1.3438 0.04611 160 114 37 9
2312 Well, I did suggest a Knight-cap 1.3438 0.04696 160 115 35 10
2313 Drink up. You're due back at the museum. 1.3438 0.04220 192 137 44 11
2314 The ad said "Speed Dating Saturday Knight" ...I thought it was a typo 1.3436 0.05028 163 122 26 15
2315 Looks like you've been watching a lot of Fox News lately... 1.3436 0.04875 163 120 30 13
2316 They always keep the round table open just for me. 1.3436 0.04554 163 116 38 9
2317 I'm not taking any chances this flu season. 1.3436 0.04636 163 117 36 10
2318 Frankly, I think the 1795 Lafite Rothschild has a better finish. 1.3436 0.04384 163 114 42 7
2319 Well,you did ask for a knight out" 1.3436 0.04797 163 119 32 12
2320 Would you stop being so defensive, Lionel! 1.3436 0.04717 163 118 34 11
2321 I thought Sharon said "a date night" not "date a knight." 1.3436 0.04636 163 117 36 10
2322 We’re breaking up? Your text said you wanted to be joust friends. You need to get a handle on your autocorrect, Linda. 1.3436 0.04875 163 120 30 13
2323 I promised you a knight out. 1.3434 0.04658 166 120 35 11
2324 My profile specifically said I’m not into one Knight stands... 1.3434 0.04736 166 121 33 12
2325 Your profile said you were looking for someone with a tough exterior. 1.3434 0.04812 166 122 31 13
2326 I guess I misunderstood what you meant by date night 1.3434 0.04498 166 118 39 9
2327 When I asked for a night out on the town, I had something else in mind. 1.3434 0.04962 166 124 27 15
2328 C’mon. I was just jousting. 1.3434 0.04333 166 116 43 7
2329 No, chivalry isn't dead, just hungry 1.3434 0.04658 166 120 35 11
2330 I know I wrote "treat me like a Queen" on my Tinder profile but this is ridiculous. 1.3432 0.04677 169 123 34 12
2331 Dianne, you are seriously underdressed. 1.3432 0.04445 169 120 40 9
2332 I just gave up on make-up. 1.3431 0.04169 204 147 44 13
2333 If the Tinman could get a heart, so can you. 1.3429 0.04418 175 125 40 10
2334 A round table at the Olive Garden. My my. And they said chivalry was dead. 1.3429 0.04343 175 124 42 9
2335 I think this is a nonstarter. 1.3427 0.04144 178 124 47 7
2336 I just find it difficult to really reach you 1.3427 0.04294 178 126 43 9
2337 When I said I'd like a night out on the town... 1.3427 0.04580 178 130 35 13
2338 I’m in transition. 1.3425 0.04660 181 134 32 15
2339 Let's skip the romance and find out what's under that hard exterior shell. 1.3425 0.04319 181 129 42 10
2340 I thought you said your therapist was getting you to shed your armor. 1.3425 0.04247 181 128 44 9
2341 I'd like to think that I project a strong exterior. 1.3424 0.04201 184 130 45 9
2342 I remember the middle ages differently. 1.3424 0.04271 184 131 43 10
2343 Defensive? How so? 1.3423 0.04740 149 106 35 8
2344 So that makes you the lady of the knight. 1.3422 0.04087 187 131 48 8
2345 You looked a lot younger in your picture 1.3422 0.04425 187 136 38 13
2346 You told me to wear my suit. 1.3422 0.04616 187 139 32 16
2347 Knight out at the round table. 1.3422 0.04359 187 135 40 12
2348 I'm not the old Gwen; give it up, Arty. 1.3421 0.04860 152 110 32 10
2349 Perhaps you misread my online profile, I promised a great knight. 1.3421 0.04312 190 137 41 12
2350 Karen thought her dinner date was being overly defensive. 1.3421 0.04769 152 109 34 9
2351 Is this your first time steed dating? 1.3417 0.04297 199 145 40 14
2352 So, you work in government? 1.3416 0.04502 161 114 39 8
2353 The MeToo movement has me feeling a little guarded. 1.3416 0.04587 161 115 37 9
2354 A brunch in shining armor is just stupid. 1.3416 0.04587 161 115 37 9
2355 Unless there's a woman under there, you're outta luck! 1.3416 0.04587 161 115 37 9
2356 Is this going to be a knightly thing? 1.3416 0.04502 161 114 39 8
2357 You know, they've stopped serving straws. 1.3416 0.04914 161 119 29 13
2358 Sit still. I'll go get you a straw 1.3416 0.03953 202 142 51 9
2359 Are you going to take off your helmet or should I ask the waiter for a straw? 1.3415 0.04531 164 117 38 9
2360 I don't know the meaning of the word 'Ni!' 1.3415 0.04926 164 122 28 14
2361 Ironically, I am more of a morning person. 1.3415 0.04613 164 118 36 10
2362 Not what I meant by a night out. 1.3415 0.04276 164 114 44 6
2363 What makes you say that I'm looking for a fight? 1.3415 0.04613 164 118 36 10
2364 No, not shining. But it is armour. 1.3415 0.04363 164 115 42 7
2365 Okay, so now are you ready to talk about the kids? 1.3413 0.03878 208 146 53 9
2366 I thought you asked for a good knight out. 1.3413 0.04556 167 120 37 10
2367 You don’t look anything like your photo. 1.3413 0.04635 167 121 35 11
2368 It's the only suit I own. 1.3413 0.04395 167 118 41 8
2369 I'll take off my glasses if you take off your head. 1.3413 0.04635 167 121 35 11
2370 You meant literally 1.3413 0.04556 167 120 37 10
2371 This isn't what I had in mind when I said I wanted a night out. 1.3412 0.04423 170 121 40 9
2372 I didn't think it was going to be this kind of night. 1.3412 0.04501 170 122 38 10
2373 No problem. I brought the WD-40. 1.3410 0.04669 173 127 33 13
2374 At least you're not another Neanderthal... 1.3410 0.04811 173 129 29 15
2375 I am sorry to learn you've been hurt before. 1.3410 0.04741 173 128 31 14
2376 You're taking this #Me Too thing to seriously, Bernie. 1.3410 0.04597 173 126 35 12
2377 The waiter said he'd bring a straw. 1.3410 0.04295 173 122 43 8
2378 I really needed a knight out on the town. 1.3410 0.04135 173 120 47 6
2379 I love the chivalry, but I wish you could be more vulnerable. 1.3409 0.04613 176 129 34 13
2380 So, how do you know Linda? 1.3409 0.04542 176 128 36 12
2381 If you're so worried about stains, don't order red wine. 1.3408 0.04489 179 130 37 12
2382 Another date knight who won’t let his guard down. 1.3407 0.04369 182 131 40 11
2383 Would I undercut my whole chivalry thing if I asked to cleave the bill in two? 1.3407 0.04299 182 130 42 10
2384 I see you also like to wear suits. 1.3406 0.04656 138 96 37 5
2385 Want me to ask the waiter for a straw? 1.3405 0.04252 185 132 43 10
2386 Perhaps you misunderstood my request for' a night out on the town' . 1.3405 0.04711 185 139 29 17
2387 How is this knight different from all other nights? 1.3405 0.04388 185 134 39 12
2388 I didn’t have time to change after work. 1.3403 0.04163 191 136 45 10
2389 Chivalry is dead. Let’s split the check. 1.3403 0.04481 191 141 35 15
2390 I think it's overkill... I'm sure Maxine Waters doesn't even know you dine here Senator! 1.3403 0.05136 144 106 27 11
2391 You may need to get a straw. 1.3401 0.04874 147 106 32 9
2392 It's a shame you can't get a straw anymore. 1.3400 0.04900 150 109 31 10
2393 You do realize it echoes when you cut the cheese? 1.3400 0.05167 150 112 25 13
2394 I requested a round table. 1.3397 0.04592 156 111 37 8
2395 Methinks, too. 1.3397 0.04501 156 110 39 7
2396 Can we skip the pleasantries and get on to the jousting? 1.3397 0.04769 156 113 33 10
2397 “So what other chivalric acts do you perform when you’re not asking for separate checks?” 1.3396 0.04707 159 115 34 10
2398 This being the third date, and getting positive signals from Alice, Wally thought it best to wear protection. 1.3396 0.04707 159 115 34 10
2399 Emotionally available I see. 1.3396 0.04707 159 115 34 10
2400 Perhaps you missed the metaphor in my online profile. 1.3396 0.04622 159 114 36 9
2401 I think a flu shot would be more practical. 1.3395 0.04888 162 120 29 13
2402 You're very chivalrous, but I'm still not going back to your castle. 1.3395 0.04564 162 116 37 9
2403 WHO hurt you so bad? 1.3395 0.04729 162 118 33 11
2404 Why so stiff? 1.3395 0.04647 162 117 35 10
2405 Your dating profile noted that you are looking for a man of steel 1.3394 0.04669 165 120 34 11
2406 I have to be honest. You look nothing like your profile picture. 1.3394 0.04669 165 120 34 11
2407 The wine has metallic notes. 1.3394 0.04589 165 119 36 10
2408 These first date rituals are simply medieval. 1.3394 0.04425 165 117 40 8
2409 Well, yes, I will admit that this blind date has given me a knight I will always remember. 1.3394 0.04589 165 119 36 10
2410 Well, your Tinder profile didn't mention glasses. So... 1.3393 0.04611 168 122 35 11
2411 I'm not happy either that they stopped serving straws. 1.3393 0.04838 168 125 29 14
2412 I don't care if you are a knight in shining armor. If you voted for Trump, I'm out of here. 1.3393 0.04688 168 123 33 12
2413 My voice message was that I wanted a "good night" drink. 1.3393 0.04373 168 119 41 8
2414 Okay, so now I realize what you meant by a "knight on the town." 1.3393 0.04688 168 123 33 12
2415 Geez, it's our third date. I think you can let your guard down now. 1.3392 0.04479 171 123 38 10
2416 I’m not looking for just one knight. 1.3392 0.04704 171 126 32 13
2417 Let's just try to enjoy the knight 1.3392 0.04555 171 124 36 11
2418 Oh, I thought your profile said you were looking for armor. 1.3392 0.04704 171 126 32 13
2419 Straw? 1.3392 0.04848 171 128 28 15
2420 I’m not looking for a one night stand. 1.3392 0.04479 171 123 38 10
2421 Sometimes I think I was better off with the dragon. 1.3392 0.04777 171 127 30 14
2422 You said your favorite movie was "You've Got Mail." 1.3392 0.04323 171 121 42 8
2423 We need to talk about your defensiveness. 1.3391 0.04351 174 124 41 9
2424 I would say that it has hints of dungeon mold, a bouquet of stagnant mote, and a rusty chain mail finish. Quite lovely, really. 1.3391 0.04647 174 128 33 13
2425 I wish you would be a little more open about things 1.3391 0.04351 174 124 41 9
2426 She did promise me it would be a "knight to remember" 1.3390 0.04150 177 124 46 7
2427 Ugh,sure. It'll be a knight to remember. 1.3390 0.04302 177 126 42 9
2428 Sorry Guen, but according to our pre-nup, my position is iron-clad: I get to keep the castle. 1.3390 0.04660 177 131 32 14
2429 I guess I thought your armor would be... shinier 1.3390 0.04521 177 129 36 12
2430 Oil can. 1.3389 0.04468 180 131 37 12
2431 #me too. You can't be too careful nowadays. 1.3389 0.04468 180 131 37 12
2432 That's quite a riveting story. 1.3389 0.04468 180 131 37 12
2433 Wine is fine, but I like beer. I REALLY like beer. Do you like beer? 1.3388 0.04617 183 136 32 15
2434 So Lancelot, where you from? 1.3388 0.04349 183 132 40 11
2435 As if your emotional armour isn’t bad enough. 1.3386 0.04188 189 135 44 10
2436 Let's drink until knightfall. 1.3384 0.03997 198 140 49 9
2437 Buddy, this is not what I had in mind for a one night stand. 1.3380 0.05372 142 107 22 13
2438 Did you not ask for a knight on the town? 1.3379 0.04817 145 104 33 8
2439 Yes, it may seem excessive. But I, not you, am the woman who has to interview the new Supreme Court Justice. 1.3379 0.05380 145 110 21 14
2440 Are you sure you don't want a straw? 1.3379 0.05290 145 109 23 13
2441 It’s just...well frankly you looked a little shinier in your online profile. 1.3378 0.04941 148 108 30 10
2442 You were shining more in the photo. 1.3378 0.04653 148 105 36 7
2443 Nah mom, this is pretty standard law clerk dress code in DC these days 1.3378 0.04847 148 107 32 9
2444 Would it be awkward if I used a straw? 1.3377 0.04781 151 109 33 9
2445 This is the best Knight out I've had in a long time. 1.3377 0.04781 151 109 33 9
2446 I told my husband I had a night meeting but he’s suspicious... 1.3377 0.04627 154 110 36 8
2447 I just wish you would make yourself a little more vulnerable with me." 1.3377 0.04807 154 112 32 10
2448 If you don't stop calling me Guinevere, this date is over. 1.3376 0.04657 157 113 35 9
2449 I'm tired of the verbal jousting. 1.3376 0.04568 157 112 37 8
2450 A drinking problem? Why do you ask? 1.3376 0.04657 157 113 35 9
2451 I want to see more of you, Claudia. But first I have to figure out how to open this visor. 1.3376 0.04195 157 108 45 4
2452 I can see where the emojis confused things... 1.3375 0.04847 160 118 30 12
2453 Of course the environment is important but I think they would understand if you asked for a straw. 1.3375 0.04847 160 118 30 12
2454 Classical and metal. What’s your favorite music? 1.3375 0.04682 160 116 34 10
2455 I'm sorry, this is not exactly what I had in mind when I requested a round table. 1.3374 0.04456 163 116 39 8
2456 You got the 'knight in shining armor' part right, but how is 'walking barefoot on the beach' going to work 1.3374 0.04784 163 120 31 12
2457 Ok, now I am ready to tell you how I honestly feel about our relationship. 1.3373 0.04486 166 119 38 9
2458 Sorry to hear you are suffering from metal fatigue 1.3373 0.04320 166 117 42 7
2459 Fine, I’ll stay for one drink... but it’s just not cool to post an old profile pic. It’s obvious you’re Middle Aged. 1.3373 0.04645 166 121 34 11
2460 I think you'll find that I'm way more chivalrous than most guys. 1.3373 0.04403 166 118 40 8
2461 Sorry I was late, my horse ran out of grass on the way here. 1.3373 0.04723 166 122 32 12
2462 I loved your profile's emphasis on chivalry and old fashioned values. 1.3373 0.04566 166 120 36 10
2463 I've got to find a more up-to-date dating service. 1.3373 0.04432 169 121 39 9
2464 I want to tell you who I'm voting for. 1.3372 0.04894 172 130 26 16
2465 Shall we try a 13th century Cabernet? 1.3372 0.04533 172 125 36 11
2466 My defenses are up. 1.3372 0.04458 172 124 38 10
2467 I'm going to need you to let your guard down. 1.3372 0.04381 172 123 40 9
2468 I thought you meant knight cap! 1.3372 0.04681 172 127 32 13
2469 Stain resistant, never needs dry cleaning, small caliber bullet proof - what's not to like? 1.3372 0.04381 172 123 40 9
2470 Since the nomination, they are flying off the rack. 1.3372 0.04141 172 120 46 6
2471 I did say no sex without protection, but isn't this a little extreme? 1.3371 0.04832 175 132 27 16
2472 I don’t like to reveal my gender until the secon date. 1.3371 0.04480 175 127 37 11
2473 That I hide my feelings? Why do you say that? 1.3371 0.04428 178 129 38 11
2474 Cynthia considers options to avoid a goodnight kiss. 1.3371 0.04428 178 129 38 11
2475 I hate that they don’t give you straws anymore. 1.3371 0.04638 178 132 32 14
2476 It's just that I thought you would have been shinier. 1.3371 0.04569 178 131 34 13
2477 Is the ponytail too much? 1.3371 0.04499 178 130 36 12
2478 You know I don't like round tables, Diana. I retired for a reason. 1.3371 0.04569 178 131 34 13
2479 You said formal attire. 1.3371 0.04054 178 124 48 6
2480 Madame, there will be no need for your chastity belt tonight. 1.3370 0.04447 181 132 37 12
2481 If we're going to sleep together, I think I should wear protection. 1.3370 0.04378 181 131 39 11
2482 When I said I wanted a night out, this isn't what I meant... 1.3370 0.04118 184 130 46 8
2483 I thought you meant date knight! 1.3370 0.04723 184 139 28 17
2484 I'll say one thing for you, you are a knight in shining armor, the agency got that right 1.3369 0.04479 187 138 35 14
2485 Knight time is the right time, get it? 1.3368 0.04429 190 140 36 14
2486 What I said was, "Looking for a good night", but lets see where this goes. 1.3368 0.04502 193 144 33 16
2487 Well, Kyle, if I knew you’d wear it on every anniversary, I’m not sure I would’ve said ‘yes’. 1.3367 0.04211 196 142 42 12
2488 Oh, it helps me stick to my diet......... 1.3366 0.03966 205 146 49 10
2489 I'm sensing a hint of blackberries with metallic overtones. 1.3359 0.05465 128 95 23 10
2490 This is a first—you look the same as you did on Tinder. 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
2491 You were the one who asked for a date knight. 1.3357 0.05130 140 103 27 10
2492 The wine is just all right, the food is overpriced, but, Hey, a round table! 1.3357 0.04957 143 104 30 9
2493 Sure, I'm a knight in shining armor. But nobody ever asks who I'm looking for. 1.3357 0.04856 143 103 32 8
2494 _Maybe, we are taking this Knightcap thing a little too far 1.3356 0.04820 149 108 32 9
2495 So long story short you're looking for someone who will shine the armor. 1.3356 0.04724 149 107 34 8
2496 I guess chivalry isn't dead. 1.3356 0.04820 149 108 32 9
2497 Sorry, using straws is against the law. 1.3355 0.04568 152 108 37 7
2498 You do know "Knight in Shining Armor" is just an expression? 1.3355 0.04755 152 110 33 9
2499 I'm trying not to be so defensive. 1.3355 0.04373 152 106 41 5
2500 You did ask for something full-bodied. 1.3355 0.05022 152 113 27 12
2501 I suppose you've heard every 'fun knight out' joke there is. 1.3355 0.04692 155 112 34 9
2502 Well,at least the table is round. 1.3355 0.04416 155 109 40 6
2503 It has a nice forward body, but the finish is a little metallic. 1.3355 0.05200 155 118 22 15
2504 Why do you always seem to be on the defensive? 1.3355 0.04602 155 111 36 8
2505 Opening the door for me was enough. 1.3355 0.04510 155 110 38 7
2506 I'm not looking for anything longterm so I hope you're okay with a one knight stand. 1.3355 0.04692 155 112 34 9
2507 I heard there is a high probability of golf ball size hail later tonight. 1.3355 0.04953 155 115 28 12
2508 No, not particularly thin-skinned. Why do you ask? 1.3355 0.04868 155 114 30 11
2509 Well, I said I was ready for a one night stand. 1.3355 0.05037 155 116 26 13
2510 So when's your knight off? 1.3354 0.04803 158 116 31 11
2511 Well, I wanted a night out on the town, and you ARE a knight out on the town. 1.3354 0.04455 158 112 39 7
2512 How long have you been on knights only dot com? 1.3354 0.04544 158 113 37 8
2513 I'm a little behind on my credit card payments, but no, I wouldn't say I'm in distress. 1.3354 0.04718 158 115 33 10
2514 'Knight in shining armor' is a euphemism, Scott. 1.3354 0.05206 158 121 21 16
2515 I can't wait to see you try to drink that. 1.3354 0.04455 158 112 39 7
2516 On our first date, I never expected a Knight like this. 1.3354 0.04632 158 114 35 9
2517 Other women would kill to sit at the round table. 1.3354 0.05057 161 122 24 15
2518 I sense you're feeling a bit defensive. 1.3354 0.04658 161 117 34 10
2519 Well, aaaaactually, it's not a ponytail. It's called a "plume". 1.3354 0.04759 164 121 31 12
2520 People tell me I'm a little closed off. 1.3354 0.04349 164 116 41 7
2521 It's like they say. Dress for the job you want. 1.3354 0.04837 164 122 29 13
2522 I'm through with "knights in shining armor." I'm moving on to "wealthy soulmates with Ferraris." 1.3354 0.04600 164 119 35 10
2523 What? I thought you wanted a roundtable discussion, Linda 1.3354 0.04837 164 122 29 13
2524 Your armor seemed shinier in your profile picture. 1.3353 0.04776 167 124 30 13
2525 This doesn't even crack my top ten for weirdness. 1.3353 0.04776 167 124 30 13
2526 I think I misunderstood you when you said Knight Club. 1.3353 0.04622 167 122 34 11
2527 I can see it's a round table, but ... 1.3353 0.04298 167 118 42 7
2528 I'm sorry, I just don't feel any magnetism. 1.3353 0.04641 170 125 33 12
2529 You looked shinier in your profile portrait. 1.3353 0.04411 170 122 39 9
2530 Can I get you a straw? 1.3353 0.04489 170 123 37 10
2531 Wouldst thou like a straw? 1.3353 0.04411 170 122 39 9
2532 A real knight never takes off his helmet until the third date. 1.3353 0.04360 173 124 40 9
2533 So good to see the Age of Chivalry isn't dead. 1.3353 0.04436 173 125 38 10
2534 It's okay, you're not the first women to realize I'm not *actually* what she's been waiting for all her life. 1.3353 0.04800 173 130 28 15
2535 That sounds like a tough breakup, but I think you're being too guarded now. 1.3353 0.04658 173 128 32 13
2536 Don't take this the wrong way, but you look a little rusty. 1.3353 0.04729 173 129 30 14
2537 And when is your coming out party? 1.3353 0.04436 173 125 38 10
2538 Do you think they can get me a straw for this? 1.3353 0.04436 173 125 38 10
2539 You wouldn't have a straw would you? 1.3352 0.04385 176 127 39 10
2540 Oh don’t worry, the size of your lance does not matter, it is how you wield it. 1.3352 0.04385 176 127 39 10
2541 I was given the option on the job application form to not reveal my gender, race and sexuality. I assume this option still applies for the interviews. 1.3352 0.04741 176 132 29 15
2542 This wasn’t exactly what I meant when I asked to be treated like a princess. 1.3352 0.04385 176 127 39 10
2543 You make me feel so damned middle-aged. 1.3352 0.04741 176 132 29 15
2544 Mine doesn't have that metallic aftertaste. 1.3352 0.04531 176 129 35 12
2545 You look so much better than your photo. 1.3352 0.04683 179 134 30 15
2546 I hope you feel like you're in a safer space now. 1.3352 0.03957 179 124 50 5
2547 I was hoping for a night of shining amour. 1.3352 0.04495 182 134 35 13
2548 I’m torn between the swordfish and a nice piece of cod. 1.3352 0.04495 182 134 35 13
2549 Well, Carol promised me a knight to remember. 1.3351 0.04100 185 131 46 8
2550 I would love to see you again, but I just get the feeling you are shutting me out. 1.3351 0.04241 185 133 42 10
2551 You go ahead....I'll wait for a straw 1.3351 0.04574 185 138 32 15
2552 Is it just me, or are you somewhat shy? 1.3351 0.04085 191 136 46 9
2553 Your choice of attire seems a bit defensive. But then again you men are having a rough time right now. 1.3333 0.04716 162 119 32 11
2554 So, do you have many lonely knights? 1.3333 0.04441 168 121 38 9
2555 Raise the visor or our marriage is over 1.3333 0.04692 171 127 31 13
2556 I agree that it's a very scary time in America for young men, but don't worry, I'm wearing my chastity belt. 1.3333 0.04059 219 161 43 15
2557 My name's Bill. But I'm changing it to Lance. 1.3333 0.04841 156 115 30 11
2558 Tina, people wouldn't have wondered about two women dining alone. 1.3333 0.04437 177 129 37 11
2559 Mi amor” does not mean “my armor”.. 1.3333 0.04229 171 121 43 7
2560 Not what I really dreamed about. It was just a metaphor. 1.3333 0.04907 153 113 29 11
2561 My hands are a disaster. Who does your mailles? 1.3333 0.04437 177 129 37 11
2562 Well, I promised you a knight on the town. 1.3333 0.04017 180 126 48 6
2563 I think you’re taking this knight in shining armor thing too far. 1.3333 0.04954 147 108 29 10
2564 Red wine with chicken? Surely you joust! 1.3333 0.04676 168 124 32 12
2565 No, this is hardly my idea of the perfect knight out. 1.3333 0.04693 159 116 33 10
2566 I don't know what I ever saw in you. 1.3333 0.04378 162 115 40 7
2567 I hope you approve. There was a wait list for a round table. 1.3333 0.05138 147 110 25 12
2568 Wine makes me rust. 1.3333 0.04608 159 115 35 9
2569 I thought Knight of the Round Table was just a cute line in your profile. 1.3333 0.04125 183 130 45 8
2570 No, asking for a straw would seem weird. 1.3333 0.04812 165 123 29 13
2571 Let me get this straight -- that wasn't a typo in your profile, AND you aren't a night person? 1.3333 0.04599 168 123 34 11
2572 You said you had a drinking problem on your profile, but this isn't what I was expecting. 1.3333 0.04777 159 117 31 11
2573 Well, yes, but I meant it figuratively. 1.3333 0.04103 174 122 46 6
2574 Is this your first date on joust.com? 1.3333 0.04543 171 125 35 11
2575 So, what kind of Knight am I in for? 1.3333 0.04543 171 125 35 11
2576 I wasn't told dating nights in my middle ages would be like this. 1.3333 0.04685 189 144 27 18
2577 I though that 'Sir' was just your Nickname ... 1.3333 0.04360 168 120 40 8
2578 They have Sir Loin here? Haven't seen him in ages." 1.3333 0.04509 177 130 35 12
2579 Was told you wanted a date knight. 1.3333 0.04907 171 130 25 16
2580 The pinot is nice, but I ordered the mead. 1.3333 0.04215 177 126 43 8
2581 So, your name is Lance? 1.3333 0.04576 165 120 35 10
2582 I'm not like those other princesses. 1.3333 0.05198 141 105 25 11
2583 It's not you. It's me. 1.3333 0.04606 183 137 31 15
2584 Your online dating profile said a “night “ to remember 1.3333 0.04899 168 127 26 15
2585 Shinier in what way? 1.3333 0.04103 174 122 46 6
2586 I think it's time we moved beyond heavy polishing. 1.3333 0.04339 174 125 40 9
2587 I sense that your response is rather guarded. 1.3333 0.04663 147 105 35 7
2588 I read in your bio that you like round tables. 1.3333 0.04457 180 132 36 12
2589 Hey, it’s your fantasy. You shine it. 1.3333 0.04467 171 124 37 10
2590 And here I thought that "Knight in Shining Armor" was just your username. 1.3333 0.04796 162 120 30 12
2591 Well, don't go getting all up in arms about it! 1.3333 0.04667 156 113 34 9
2592 Should we ask for straw? 1.3333 0.04467 171 124 37 10
2593 Nice romantic spot...See much of the Lion and Scarecrow these day? 1.3333 0.04706 174 130 30 14
2594 The ban on straws is a real bummer for you, isn't it? 1.3333 0.04580 177 131 33 13
2595 I'm sorry to tell you. Chivalry is dead 1.3333 0.04431 159 113 39 7
2596 You look nothing like your pictures. 1.3333 0.04290 177 127 41 9
2597 There would be fewer notes of tin and leather if you put up your visor. 1.3333 0.04926 156 116 28 12
2598 I'm guessing the whole 'knight in shining armor thing' was just a metaphor, right? 1.3316 0.04324 196 145 37 14
2599 My armor’s called a “pantsuit.” 1.3316 0.04245 193 141 40 12
2600 This isn't my first knight at a round table. 1.3316 0.04181 193 140 42 11
2601 We could go play chess at my place. 1.3316 0.04355 190 140 37 13
2602 I'm afraid my conversation skills are a little rusty. 1.3316 0.04091 190 136 45 9
2603 "Renaissance man? I'm thinking Medieval." 1.3316 0.04403 187 138 36 13
2604 I'm guessing coming back to my place is out of the question? 1.3315 0.04318 184 134 39 11
2605 When your attorney said "there would be some jousting over the house," well, I just presumed............ 1.3315 0.04295 181 131 40 10
2606 Do you think this Beaujolais Nouveau has a metallic aftertaste? 1.3315 0.04150 181 129 44 8
2607 I like your pony tail. 1.3315 0.04150 181 129 44 8
2608 All right, perhaps I shouldn't have said in my posting that I still go wild for Heavy Metal. 1.3315 0.04344 178 129 39 10
2609 Call me old fashioned, but I never raise my visor on a first date. 1.3315 0.04344 178 129 39 10
2610 You said you wanted a knight in shining armor on your dating profile, what else were you expecting Sharon? 1.3315 0.04416 178 130 37 11
2611 I asked for a quite NIGHT out. 1.3315 0.04627 178 133 31 14
2612 Just in case things go well I want you to know I'm protected. 1.3315 0.04119 178 126 45 7
2613 We have to stop meading like this. 1.3315 0.04487 178 131 35 12
2614 I said, show me a great night*... 1.3314 0.04612 175 130 32 13
2615 You don't really look like your profile picture. 1.3314 0.04612 175 130 32 13
2616 My anger management is going well, thank you. 1.3314 0.04163 175 124 44 7
2617 So how do you get through metal detectors 1.3314 0.04445 172 125 37 10
2618 Sorry I'm defensive. 1.3314 0.04595 172 127 33 12
2619 I'm NOT too defensive! 1.3314 0.04368 172 124 39 9
2620 I always get the knightly special. 1.3314 0.04368 172 124 39 9
2621 Truth be told, Roger, the lighting here makes you look medieval. 1.3314 0.04445 172 125 37 10
2622 The friend that set up this blind date said it would be a night to remember...another spell check failure 1.3314 0.04669 172 128 31 13
2623 I’m getting notes of rust with a steely finish.” 1.3314 0.04368 172 124 39 9
2624 You can drop your guard now. 1.3314 0.04257 169 120 42 7
2625 It’s called wine. They haven’t served mead here in years. 1.3314 0.04498 169 123 36 10
2626 This is not what I meant by one night stand. 1.3314 0.04576 169 124 34 11
2627 I try and try and my captions never win! 1.3313 0.04787 166 124 29 13
2628 It really isn't as difficult as you may think, if you help me down onto the floor I will be able to drink most of it. 1.3313 0.04711 166 123 31 12
2629 I know it's a blind date, but you can uncover yourself now. 1.3313 0.04390 166 119 39 8
2630 So I guess your profile was honest. You are an old fashioned gentleman in a modern world. 1.3313 0.04553 166 121 35 10
2631 Why don’t you ever take me to Camelot? 1.3313 0.04553 166 121 35 10
2632 Ignore them. They only stare because they‘re envious. 1.3313 0.04632 166 122 33 11
2633 I guess you weren’t lying in your profilewhen you said you were chivalrous. 1.3313 0.04527 163 118 36 9
2634 Is that the new Over Armour brand you are wearing? 1.3313 0.04691 163 120 32 11
2635 Actually, I'm a morning person. 1.3313 0.04771 163 121 30 12
2636 I see you still won't let your guard down. 1.3313 0.04691 163 120 32 11
2637 Just ask the waiter for a straw. 1.3313 0.04442 163 117 38 8
2638 'When I said I wanted a quiet night, this isn't exactly what I had in mind" 1.3313 0.04583 160 116 35 9
2639 Some how when you said the strong, silent type, I had another impression. 1.3313 0.04409 160 114 39 7
2640 I've decided to run for President of the United States. 1.3313 0.04834 160 119 29 12
2641 Wouldn't it be easier to use hand sanitizer? 1.3313 0.04583 160 116 35 9
2642 Something tells me you used a fake profile picture 1.3312 0.04729 157 115 32 10
2643 You said you wanted a knight out. 1.3312 0.04981 157 118 26 13
2644 And you say chivalry is dead... 1.3312 0.04463 157 112 38 7
2645 My friends told me that you were an old soul. 1.3312 0.04729 157 115 32 10
2646 Have a sip. I’ll help you open up. 1.3312 0.04553 157 113 36 8
2647 I wanted a night off,not a knight out. 1.3312 0.04553 157 113 36 8
2648 You look different than your picture on Match.com 1.3312 0.04703 154 112 33 9
2649 Will we be jousting at my place or yours? 1.3312 0.04966 154 115 27 12
2650 You're my first knight. 1.3312 0.04966 154 115 27 12
2651 No worries. I like older men. 1.3311 0.04766 151 110 32 9
2652 It's hard to feel close to you, Joan. 1.3311 0.04925 148 109 29 10
2653 Where do you think the valet will put your horse? 1.3310 0.04969 142 104 29 9
2654 I can’t even look at you anymore. 1.3300 0.03853 203 144 51 8
2655 I didn't expect '...in shining armor' to be taken literally 1.3299 0.04033 194 139 46 9
2656 When you described yourself as a “knight in shining armor,” I thought you were speaking metaphorically. 1.3298 0.04448 188 140 34 14
2657 I suppose I could have clarified what I meant by "looking for a traditional relationship." 1.3298 0.04318 188 138 38 12
2658 My Job? I’m currently on a quest, but the occasional pillage is rather lucrative 1.3298 0.04318 188 138 38 12
2659 I get it. Date knight. Droll. 1.3297 0.04229 185 134 41 10
2660 I thought it was date night, not date knight. 1.3297 0.04433 185 137 35 13
2661 No, it's alright, I just didn't think this was what you meant by 'a night out on the town' 1.3296 0.04395 179 131 37 11
2662 No, I'm not a damsel, and no, I'm not in distress... 1.3296 0.04323 179 130 39 10
2663 Tinder is the knight 1.3296 0.04323 179 130 39 10
2664 Well mom, there's a good reason Ed calls you a battleax. 1.3295 0.04221 176 126 42 8
2665 I really think you've been touring with "Spam-a-lot" a bit too long. 1.3295 0.04221 176 126 42 8
2666 Sorry. This is California. No straws. 1.3295 0.04446 176 129 36 11
2667 I wasn't trying to start a fight, I just prefer a roundtable. 1.3295 0.04065 176 124 46 6
2668 Hard day at work? 1.3295 0.04065 176 124 46 6
2669 I wanted to talk about our sex life. 1.3295 0.04298 176 127 40 9
2670 Just my luck! I choose a “Man of Steel”, they send a “Knight in Rusty Armor!” 1.3295 0.04221 176 126 42 8
2671 They forgot the bendy straw 1.3295 0.04298 176 127 40 9
2672 I've hidden your oil can. 1.3295 0.04499 173 127 35 11
2673 A Knight to Forget 1.3295 0.04269 173 124 41 8
2674 Don't worry, I don't unsheathe on the first date. 1.3295 0.04499 173 127 35 11
2675 Back off, Sir Handsalot! 1.3295 0.04269 173 124 41 8
2676 When I requested a round table I was expecting something a little grander. 1.3295 0.04189 173 123 43 7
2677 Not exactly my idea of a knight out on the town 1.3294 0.04397 170 123 38 9
2678 Should I ask for a square table for a change of pace? 1.3294 0.04397 170 123 38 9
2679 I thought I mentioned my hobbies... 1.3294 0.04068 170 119 46 5
2680 Well, you were right! Mail enhancement has significantly improved my strength and confidence. 1.3293 0.04763 167 125 29 13
2681 I don't feel like I'm getting through to you half the time. 1.3293 0.04450 167 121 37 9
2682 Your profile picture must have been taken at a different angle. 1.3293 0.04368 167 120 39 8
2683 Truthfully, I checked the online​ dating box for steel blue eyes. 1.3293 0.04450 167 121 37 9
2684 This is what I get for joining TheeHarmony. 1.3293 0.04686 167 124 31 12
2685 You can imagine what it's like having a name like Brett. 1.3293 0.04824 164 123 28 13
2686 This isn't the knight cap I had in mind. 1.3293 0.04746 164 122 30 12
2687 Your profile said you like chivalrous men. 1.3293 0.04667 164 121 32 11
2688 You look vulnerable. 1.3293 0.04824 164 123 28 13
2689 I've gotten a little rusty when it comes to dating. 1.3293 0.04746 164 122 30 12
2690 Actually, it filters the wine perfectly 1.3293 0.04746 164 122 30 12
2691 You wanted a round table, I got you a round table. 1.3292 0.04386 161 115 39 7
2692 Sorry, I still don't understand the whole "smart-casual" thing. 1.3292 0.04644 161 118 33 10
2693 I know you wanted our first date to be old-fashioned, but this is a little extreme. 1.3292 0.04727 161 119 31 11
2694 I just get the sense that you have your defenses up. 1.3292 0.04560 161 117 35 9
2695 It's just that you take everything so literally. 1.3291 0.04789 158 117 30 11
2696 This isn’t what I meant when I said I wanted a night out on the town 1.3291 0.04348 158 112 40 6
2697 I only drink antioxidants. 1.3291 0.04704 158 116 32 10
2698 I said date night, not date knight. 1.3291 0.04789 158 117 30 11
2699 Sure, the table's round. But these aren't goblets and your armor barely shines. 1.3291 0.04617 158 115 34 9
2700 Prithee, of what is this Tinder pic that you do speak of? 1.3291 0.04439 158 113 38 7
2701 Hand sanitizer, might be a better way to go. 1.3290 0.04587 155 112 35 8
2702 And here I thought chivalry was dead. 1.3290 0.04495 155 111 37 7
2703 Tell me about your divorce. 1.3290 0.04853 155 115 29 11
2704 Does the wine have a slight metallic taste to you? 1.3290 0.04853 155 115 29 11
2705 Thine Tinder hadst moved me 1.3289 0.04739 152 111 32 9
2706 I hope you brought your sword because we're splitting the check. 1.3289 0.04708 149 108 33 8
2707 I know they are frowned on, but I think you should try a straw. 1.3287 0.04940 143 105 29 9
2708 Maybe a straw would help? 1.3283 0.04165 198 145 41 12
2709 Pepper spray works for me. 1.3280 0.04166 189 137 42 10
2710 Do you think it would be bad form to ask for a straw? 1.3280 0.04299 189 139 38 12
2711 When I said “shut your face,” I didn’t mean for you to take it literally . 1.3280 0.04299 189 139 38 12
2712 My horoscope said this would be a knight to remember. 1.3280 0.03924 186 131 49 6
2713 This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I said I wanted a night out on the town. 1.3279 0.04463 183 136 34 13
2714 Are you sure I can't get you a straw? 1.3278 0.04081 180 128 45 7
2715 Agincourt? You don't say. I served two tours in Afghanistan! 1.3278 0.03926 180 126 49 5
2716 I think you should open up more, don't be so guarded 1.3277 0.04202 177 127 42 8
2717 I thought you were being literal 1.3277 0.04202 177 127 42 8
2718 So, Jane, how do you feel about Kavanaugh's confirmation to the Supreme Court? 1.3277 0.04568 177 132 32 13
2719 I feel like you’re not opening up. 1.3277 0.04425 177 130 36 11
2720 Shall I call you "dame" or "wench?" 1.3277 0.04352 177 129 38 10
2721 Perhaps I should have been more specific in my profile when I said I was looking for someone with 'old fashioned' sensibilities... 1.3277 0.04352 177 129 38 10
2722 [incredibly loud farting noise amplified by metallic ass plate] 1.3277 0.04706 177 134 28 15
2723 You seem closed up tonight. 1.3277 0.04568 177 132 32 13
2724 Wouldn't say a lot. More like lance a little. 1.3276 0.04326 174 126 39 9
2725 The dating service was awfully literal. 1.3276 0.04550 174 129 33 12
2726 I can still throw wine in your face. 1.3275 0.04606 171 127 32 12
2727 You don't look like your picture. 1.3275 0.04530 171 126 34 11
2728 Sheila realizes, she needs to be more specific when visualizing a night to remember. 1.3275 0.04376 171 124 38 9
2729 I'll be honest, this wasn't the knight I was expecting... 1.3274 0.04179 168 119 43 6
2730 I’m taking the subway home tonight and I like to be prepared. 1.3274 0.04346 168 121 39 8
2731 Oops, I forgot to ask for a straw.. 1.3274 0.04663 168 125 31 12
2732 I wouldn't call it "shining armor." It's more of a "brushed nickel." 1.3273 0.04481 165 120 36 9
2733 I thought they’d have straws. 1.3273 0.04643 165 122 32 11
2734 Whaddaya mean, "defensive"? 1.3273 0.04562 165 121 34 10
2735 When my friend said this was going to be a ‘nice knight,’ this wasn’t what I expected.” 1.3272 0.04940 162 123 25 14
2736 As the years wore on, the princess had long ago resigned herself to the fact that even “happily ever after” is not without it’s embarrassing moments. 1.3272 0.04783 162 121 29 12
2737 How was I supposed to know you meant a NIGHT club, Sharon? 1.3272 0.04702 162 120 31 11
2738 Happy Date Knight. 1.3272 0.04620 162 119 33 10
2739 This is such a treat. It isn’t everyday I get to sit at a round table” 1.3272 0.04783 162 121 29 12
2740 Can we get the bill? My horse is double parked. 1.3270 0.04679 159 117 32 10
2741 I'm seeing no one else. 1.3270 0.04505 159 115 36 8
2742 So should we ask for a straw? 1.3270 0.04505 159 115 36 8
2743 So ,what was your first wife like? 1.3270 0.04763 159 118 30 11
2744 once a knight is too much. 1.3270 0.04763 159 118 30 11
2745 I've pretty much stopped drinking since the new straw restrictions 1.3270 0.04679 159 117 32 10
2746 Not a fan of the coat check system? 1.3270 0.04505 159 115 36 8
2747 This is a knight that you will never forget. 1.3270 0.04846 159 119 28 12
2748 I told Siri I wanted a night of dining and amore, not knight in shining armor! 1.3270 0.04846 159 119 28 12
2749 Do you want a straw? 1.3270 0.05008 159 121 24 14
2750 You don’t look like your picture on eHarmony. 1.3269 0.04562 156 113 35 8
2751 I just assumed "'Knight' of the Round Table" was a misprint. 1.3269 0.04471 156 112 37 7
2752 Safe Sex. 1.3269 0.04377 156 111 39 6
2753 'Please Carl, you're being way too defensive about this' 1.3269 0.04740 156 115 31 10
2754 I'm sorry, Roger. When I wrote I was looking for my knight in shining armor, I was being figurative. 1.3269 0.04562 156 113 35 8
2755 I made it from an old DeLorean. 1.3269 0.04740 156 115 31 10
2756 I always look forward to date knight. 1.3268 0.04804 153 113 30 10
2757 "You are talking through your hat as usual" 1.3268 0.04713 153 112 32 9
2758 I'm always a little defensive on first dates. 1.3268 0.04333 153 108 40 5
2759 Maybe if we tried a restaurant outside the D.C. area..... 1.3268 0.04804 153 113 30 10
2760 I'm ready to answer your question now. Yes, I am a Kavanaugh supporter. 1.3268 0.04713 153 112 32 9
2761 I know you wanted a booth, but I never get to sit at the Round Table anymore. 1.3267 0.04682 150 109 33 8
2762 Is the suit too much? 1.3267 0.04869 150 111 29 10
2763 Oh, my profile? Sorry. That's an old tapestry of me 1.3265 0.03998 196 141 46 9
2764 I understand being emotionally guarded but really 1.3263 0.04147 190 138 42 10
2765 She said I need to work on being more vulnerable. 1.3262 0.04191 187 136 41 10
2766 I realized I was actually just interested in the shining armor. 1.3261 0.04374 184 136 36 12
2767 At that moment Linda could not decide whether it was auto-correct or Jeff she disliked more. Either way, date night would never be the same. 1.3260 0.04561 181 136 31 14
2768 I'm calling it a knight. 1.3260 0.04211 181 131 41 9
2769 You may want a straw. 1.3260 0.03986 181 128 47 6
2770 Would you be embarrassed if I asked them for a straw? 1.3260 0.04283 181 132 39 10
2771 Well, this is a knight I'll always remember. 1.3258 0.04475 178 132 34 12
2772 So you weren't just trying to be cute on your dating profile... 1.3258 0.04331 178 130 38 10
2773 When I was promised a knight of passion,I wasn't expecting this. 1.3258 0.04182 178 128 42 8
2774 I'm sensing that you're more into verbal jousting. 1.3257 0.04228 175 126 41 8
2775 I've had better knights on the town.... 1.3257 0.04305 175 127 39 9
2776 A knight I will purposely forget. 1.3257 0.04455 175 129 35 11
2777 Is something wrong? You seem to have a hard time opening up to me. 1.3257 0.04528 175 130 33 12
2778 What? 1.3257 0.04600 175 131 31 13
2779 So you think getting well oiled will really help? 1.3257 0.04528 175 130 33 12
2780 And, I was first in my class at Yale. 1.3256 0.04096 215 160 40 15
2781 I was afraid you wouldn’t look anything like your picture. 1.3256 0.04656 172 129 30 13
2782 I'll be okay as long as they have straws. 1.3256 0.04508 172 127 34 11
2783 This isn't exactly what I had in mind when you said chivalry's not dead. 1.3256 0.04195 172 123 42 7
2784 What do you mean 'defensive?' 1.3256 0.04432 172 126 36 10
2785 My dad told me never to go out on a date without protection. 1.3254 0.04639 169 126 31 12
2786 We need to talk... 1.3254 0.04325 169 122 39 8
2787 Oh, ok, I thought you just meant you were chivalrous. 1.3254 0.04242 169 121 41 7
2788 And what are your hobbies? 1.3254 0.04562 169 125 33 11
2789 It's a living! 1.3254 0.04242 169 121 41 7
2790 So what are you going to be for Halloween? 1.3254 0.04325 169 122 39 8
2791 It's WD-40 with a twist. Do you like it? 1.3253 0.04619 166 123 32 11
2792 Well, your profile says “Be my Knight in shining armour” 1.3253 0.04458 166 121 36 9
2793 I was hoping to have a better knight 1.3253 0.04619 166 123 32 11
2794 You look different than your profile picture 1.3253 0.04539 166 122 34 10
2795 Shining? In this light, maybe. 1.3253 0.04375 166 120 38 8
2796 It's just a blind date, you don't have to be so guarded. 1.3253 0.04697 166 124 30 12
2797 Yes, by all means, show me your sword. 1.3252 0.04512 163 119 35 9
2798 It's just that sometimes it feels like there's something between us preventing us from connecting" 1.3252 0.04428 163 118 37 8
2799 This is not going to work if you keep your guard up. 1.3252 0.04428 163 118 37 8
2800 Do you want me to ask for a straw? 1.3252 0.04428 163 118 37 8
2801 No, I'm just surprised that you ordered chicken after rescuing me from that dragon is all. 1.3252 0.04677 163 121 31 11
2802 I wouldn’t say I take advantage of my knights and weekends... 1.3252 0.04677 163 121 31 11
2803 Your profile picture doesn’t do you justice. 1.3252 0.04428 163 118 37 8
2804 I know what you mean. I get that chain mail as well. 1.3252 0.04677 163 121 31 11
2805 Don't look at me like that. I used the metal cleaner you gave me. 1.3252 0.04512 163 119 35 9
2806 You looked younger in your photo. 1.3250 0.04482 160 116 36 8
2807 No way, I'm not wearing white satin. 1.3250 0.04482 160 116 36 8
2808 Who doesn’t love a blind date? 1.3250 0.04116 160 112 44 4
2809 The haircut really isn't that bad. 1.3250 0.04393 160 115 38 7
2810 Do you want to ditch this joing and move to White Castle? 1.3250 0.04738 160 119 30 11
2811 I am surprised, you left out that you are wearing glasses in your profile. 1.3250 0.04738 160 119 30 11
2812 You look exactly like your profile photo. 1.3250 0.04482 160 116 36 8
2813 I've always been a sucker for a steely gaze. 1.3250 0.04738 160 119 30 11
2814 Dammit, Nick, this is not what I meant when I said 'chivalry is dead.' 1.3250 0.04901 160 121 26 13
2815 My place to Netflix and joust afterwards? 1.3250 0.04482 160 116 36 8
2816 Yes, you certainly appear to be a Renaissance Man. 1.3248 0.04538 157 114 35 8
2817 Actually, I meant something different in my ad when I wrote 'willing to go medieval'. 1.3248 0.04800 157 117 29 11
2818 They serve a nice pig on a spit. 1.3248 0.04354 157 112 39 6
2819 Will you be emotionally available on Friday? 1.3247 0.04777 154 114 30 10
2820 Could I get a straw? 1.3247 0.04777 154 114 30 10
2821 Is this your idea of a night out? 1.3247 0.04951 154 116 26 12
2822 You said Under Armour would be too casual for this place. 1.3247 0.05036 154 117 24 13
2823 Its not you Lance; a lot of it is me. 1.3246 0.04450 191 144 32 15
2824 The difference between "Middle Aged" and "Middle Ages" on an eHarmony profile. 1.3245 0.05021 151 114 25 12
2825 When you said “meet me at the round table” I had no idea..... 1.3245 0.04842 151 112 29 10
2826 This is not what I expected when I used the Camelot dating app 1.3245 0.04656 151 110 33 8
2827 My Old English is a bit rusty. 1.3245 0.04372 188 140 35 13
2828 Did you remember to bring the WD-40? 1.3245 0.04173 188 137 41 10
2829 Well how shiny were you expecting? 1.3243 0.04147 185 134 42 9
2830 I see that my reputation precedes me. 1.3243 0.04620 148 107 34 7
2831 Well, you're a step up from the toad I was matched with last week. 1.3243 0.04217 185 135 40 10
2832 Helen, when I said I need to get oiled, I didn’t mean this. 1.3242 0.04334 182 134 37 11
2833 No first date magnetic attraction, huh? 1.3242 0.04191 182 132 41 9
2834 Join me for a knight cap? 1.3242 0.04191 182 132 41 9
2835 Since chivalry is dead, do you mind going Dutch? 1.3242 0.04191 182 132 41 9
2836 I thought you meant emotional armor 1.3242 0.04403 182 135 35 12
2837 My therapist says I’m having issues being vulnerable. 1.3241 0.05074 145 109 25 11
2838 At least your wife's friends will not be able to recognize you. 1.3240 0.04383 179 132 36 11
2839 You got to be kidding me! That's not your LANCE? 1.3239 0.04506 176 131 33 12
2840 I know I said you might need protection... 1.3239 0.04360 176 129 37 10
2841 Not quite my knight in shining armor 1.3239 0.03970 176 124 47 5
2842 My heart's desire, my knight in dining armor. 1.3239 0.04433 176 130 35 11
2843 Chivalry is dead .... and uncomfortable. 1.3239 0.04853 176 136 23 17
2844 You really don’t look anything like your Tinder profile. 1.3239 0.04130 176 126 43 7
2845 I amazed at how specialized dating apps have become. 1.3237 0.05025 139 103 27 9
2846 I'll put down my defences when you put down yours 1.3237 0.04175 173 124 42 7
2847 Dorothy, we have really aged since the yellow brick road! 1.3235 0.04616 170 127 31 12
2848 Well of course it has a metalic aftertaste. 1.3235 0.04222 170 122 41 7
2849 The Crusades are NEVER over. 1.3235 0.04540 170 126 33 11
2850 I get the feeling you don’t really like blind dates. 1.3234 0.04435 167 122 36 9
2851 I don't listen to heavy metal. 1.3234 0.04353 167 121 38 8
2852 Honestly Eddie, a square table, a round table, it doesn't really matter. You're still boring. 1.3232 0.04335 198 149 34 15
2853 Jen regretted asking for a knight in shining armor in her profile. 1.3232 0.04319 164 118 39 7
2854 Can you get me a straw? 1.3232 0.04489 164 120 35 9
2855 A little defensive? well...maybe. 1.3232 0.04489 164 120 35 9
2856 I just have a hard time coming out of my shell, you know? 1.3232 0.04572 164 121 33 10
2857 I hope you don't think I'm the type of girl that will make out on the first knight. 1.3232 0.04811 164 124 27 13
2858 I ‘ve been hurt too many times 1.3232 0.04572 164 121 33 10
2859 Once a night is enough for me. 1.3230 0.04545 161 118 34 9
2860 So that makes sense. Its’s “E-Armor-y” not “E-Harmony” 1.3230 0.04371 161 116 38 7
2861 Pen mightier than the sword, eh? Surely you joust! 1.3230 0.04629 161 119 32 10
2862 I've heard you can be quite defensive. 1.3229 0.04044 192 139 44 9
2863 Well, your profile isn't exactly true either... 1.3228 0.04774 158 118 29 11
2864 Why no, I’ve never considered being a literal person as a relationship handicap. Why do you ask? 1.3228 0.04602 158 116 33 9
2865 Do you happen to have a straw? 1.3228 0.04858 158 119 27 12
2866 Just another knight 1.3228 0.04514 158 115 35 8
2867 I'm waiting for the wine to breathe, and for a straw. 1.3228 0.04423 158 114 37 7
2868 My first husband was emotionally distant, but I could tell right away that you’re different. 1.3226 0.04571 155 113 34 8
2869 My therapist tells me I have rust issues. 1.3226 0.04571 155 113 34 8
2870 Consider me a damsel in distrust. 1.3226 0.04334 186 138 36 12
2871 She could see this was going to be a hard night 1.3226 0.04751 155 115 30 10
2872 Blind tasting has gotten so out of hand. 1.3226 0.04662 155 114 32 9
2873 I joust don't think this is going to work. 1.3226 0.04662 155 114 32 9
2874 It's a shame our offices don't have casual Fridays. 1.3226 0.04384 155 111 38 6
2875 This is the best knight club in town. 1.3224 0.04314 183 135 37 11
2876 Would you still find me attractive if you weren't drunk and looking through a visor? 1.3224 0.04244 183 134 39 10
2877 Well you responded to my profile picture!! 1.3224 0.04244 183 134 39 10
2878 They say a knightly glass of wine is good for your heart. 1.3224 0.04172 183 133 41 9
2879 A dry red with medieval undertones.. 1.3224 0.04904 152 114 27 11
2880 I assume this means that mediation is out of the question. 1.3224 0.05079 152 116 23 13
2881 I thought that ‘Knight in shining armor’ was just a metaphor when I read your ad. 1.3224 0.04723 152 112 31 9
2882 Let's get this straight. I ain't gonna wear no chastity belt when you're off at the Crusades reenactment festival. 1.3224 0.04630 152 111 33 8
2883 I'm sorry, this isn't going to work. I just can't see myself with a vegan. 1.3224 0.04992 152 115 25 12
2884 This is not what I meant by “A night on the town.” 1.3222 0.04068 180 129 44 7
2885 Not quite as romantic as you expected, is it? 1.3222 0.04290 180 132 38 10
2886 You know John, the wine isn’t the only thing that won’t open up. 1.3222 0.04638 180 137 28 15
2887 But your profile said White Satin. 1.3222 0.04502 180 135 32 13
2888 Well, it's not a "raise the visor" kind of an evening, is it? 1.3221 0.04881 149 111 28 10
2889 You looked younger in your profile picture 1.3221 0.04973 149 112 26 11
2890 It’s fine. I’ll ask for a straw. 1.3221 0.04494 149 107 36 6
2891 Just when I was convinced that chivalry was dead. 1.3220 0.04188 177 128 41 8
2892 Are you the victimized American white male? 1.3220 0.04412 177 131 35 11
2893 And they say chivalry is dead. 1.3220 0.04264 177 129 39 9
2894 What, exactly, did you mean when you said, 'Let's go play Storm the Castle'? 1.3219 0.04950 146 109 27 10
2895 I have to be more careful, what I wish for 1.3218 0.04312 174 127 38 9
2896 When I wrote ‘Will you be my knight in shining armour?’ I didn’t mean literally.” 1.3218 0.04538 174 130 32 12
2897 I originally booked the round table, but it was too expensive. 1.3218 0.04538 174 130 32 12
2898 Lately my search for the perfect Bordeaux has been turning into something of a crusade. 1.3218 0.04235 174 126 40 8
2899 I’m no longer a damsel but I’m still in distress. 1.3218 0.04389 174 128 36 10
2900 You need oil more than you need wine! 1.3218 0.04312 174 127 38 9
2901 Yes, you did. But I thought you meant you are a “night person” 1.3218 0.04389 174 128 36 10
2902 No, really, it's me. It's hard for me to open up. 1.3218 0.04235 174 126 40 8
2903 I'm your knight in dining armor. Why don't you think that is funny? 1.3218 0.04682 174 132 28 14
2904 I have been waiting all my life for a Knight in Shining Armor, but now that you are finally here I am underwhelmed. 1.3218 0.04389 174 128 36 10
2905 So how do I do this Fairy Princess thing? 1.3217 0.05119 143 108 24 11
2906 I guess you took that knight in shining armor thing a little too literally. 1.3217 0.04821 143 105 30 8
2907 OK, this is not what I imagined when you asked me if I'd like a night out. 1.3217 0.04821 143 105 30 8
2908 I misinterpreted you when you said "a night out." 1.3216 0.04517 171 127 33 11
2909 Met security never noticed I was wearing it out of the building. 1.3216 0.04517 171 127 33 11
2910 Brett, you do seem a little defensive. 1.3216 0.04362 171 125 37 9
2911 When you said a ‘night out on the town’, this wasn’t really what I had in mind. 1.3214 0.04249 168 121 40 7
2912 Yes Bob, I think the waiter got your "fortified wine" joke. 1.3214 0.04332 168 122 38 8
2913 Mmmm...My online dating description did say I needed a knight in shining armor. 1.3214 0.04077 168 119 44 5
2914 Well at least you have finally quit smoking. 1.3214 0.04649 168 126 30 12
2915 Believe me, I'm just a teddy bear once you get past the hard exterior. 1.3214 0.04572 168 125 32 11
2916 I’m not disappointed, but I will admit you looked shinier on Tinder. 1.3214 0.04413 168 123 36 9
2917 Sir Drinkalot, I presume? 1.3214 0.04249 168 121 40 7
2918 So Marvin...still a bit edgy since our last argument? 1.3212 0.04093 193 141 42 10
2919 Honestly Fred, how long is this gluten avoidance phase going to last? 1.3212 0.04410 193 146 32 15
2920 I thought role play was supposed to spice things up. 1.3212 0.04297 165 119 39 7
2921 I'm just now realizing you meant you wanted a "night out"... 1.3212 0.04297 165 119 39 7
2922 I really prefer it when the waiter calls me "sir." 1.3212 0.04629 165 123 31 11
2923 This way we are both protected 1.3212 0.04548 165 122 33 10
2924 The ban on straws is really making me reevaluate things. 1.3212 0.05276 137 104 22 11
2925 I forgot to ask for a straw. 1.3211 0.04202 190 140 39 11
2926 It was your distress that intrigued me. 1.3211 0.04068 190 138 43 9
2927 How bout we go back to mine and joust. 1.3211 0.04136 190 139 41 10
2928 You wouldn't believe the barriers people put up to keep others at a distance... 1.3210 0.04168 162 115 42 5
2929 Do you think they validate parking for my steed? 1.3210 0.04605 162 120 32 10
2930 I never remove my armor on a first date. 1.3210 0.04435 162 118 36 8
2931 I read on your dating profile that you were looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.3209 0.04381 187 140 34 13
2932 I don't kiss on the first date either 1.3209 0.04247 187 138 38 11
2933 Yes, I suppose the Late Mediaeval Period was also a scary time for young men. 1.3209 0.04247 187 138 38 11
2934 Well I didn’t ask for a straw Richard because I don’t need a straw. 1.3208 0.04831 159 120 27 12
2935 I thought you said you wanted a nice knight out? 1.3205 0.04725 156 116 30 10
2936 Not quite the iron-clad solution to abstinence that I had in mind! 1.3205 0.04725 156 116 30 10
2937 It's hard to be a young man these days in America. 1.3205 0.04811 156 117 28 11
2938 This round table is far more intimate than the one I'm used to. 1.3205 0.04636 156 115 32 9
2939 I hear the Dragon Roll here is delicious! 1.3205 0.04454 156 113 36 7
2940 According to your bio, it was supposed to be shining. 1.3204 0.04270 181 133 38 10
2941 Try sticks and stones. See where that gets you. 1.3204 0.04198 181 132 40 9
2942 It’s not ideal but my burka is at the dry cleaners. 1.3203 0.04697 153 113 31 9
2943 Don't you tell me how to cope with middle age! 1.3203 0.04697 153 113 31 9
2944 Did I tell you my take on "safe sex"? 1.3203 0.04877 153 115 27 11
2945 You’re not as shiny as your picture. 1.3203 0.04964 153 116 25 12
2946 Does this mean I’ll never see you again? 1.3203 0.04414 153 110 37 6
2947 You seem wonderful, but to be honest, I'm kind of a morning person. 1.3200 0.04515 175 131 32 12
2948 It's not chivalry that I wish were dead. 1.3200 0.04515 175 131 32 12
2949 You clank, I snore...this could be the break we’re looking for! 1.3200 0.04442 175 130 34 11
2950 The counselor said you should open up with me. 1.3200 0.04853 150 112 28 10
2951 I thought you were kidding when your profile said you were a knight in shining armor. 1.3200 0.04469 150 108 36 6
2952 Did you pick up the mail? 1.3200 0.04136 175 126 42 7
2953 I appreciate safe sex, but don't you think this is a bit much? 1.3200 0.04214 175 127 40 8
2954 I thought you said a NIGHT on the town. 1.3200 0.04760 150 111 30 9
2955 It's not what I meant when I said I wanted a night out. 1.3200 0.04665 150 110 32 8
2956 When the dating site said that I'd have a "good knight," I was thinking a "good night". 1.3198 0.04341 172 126 37 9
2957 I wasn't lying on my profile when I said I had "Buns of Steel". 1.3198 0.04643 172 130 29 13
2958 My therapist calls it a defense mechanism. 1.3198 0.04569 172 129 31 12
2959 ...a bit of metallic taste? 1.3198 0.04015 172 122 45 5
2960 They no longer have straws. 1.3197 0.05015 147 111 25 11
2961 Are you my knight in shining armor or just someone with intimacy issues? 1.3197 0.04825 147 109 29 9
2962 What do you mean my profile was misleading? 1.3197 0.04728 147 108 31 8
2963 I appreciate the shining armor, but box wine? 1.3195 0.04626 169 127 30 12
2964 Fruity? Tasted netallic to me. 1.3195 0.04310 169 123 38 8
2965 Ralph, my fantasy was a night in sublime ardor. 1.3195 0.04626 169 127 30 12
2966 I don't raise the visor until the second date, but I can assure you I am Prince Charming. 1.3194 0.04479 144 103 36 5
2967 That’s not what I meant on the dating website when I said I loved “heavy metal.” 1.3194 0.04893 144 107 28 9
2968 My friends used to love this restaurant. We came-a-lot. 1.3193 0.04761 166 126 27 13
2969 I think she said business attire, not ambitious squire. 1.3193 0.04605 166 124 31 11
2970 Why do I think you are about to ask me for a divorce? 1.3193 0.04360 166 121 37 8
2971 It's ancient history now. 1.3193 0.04525 166 123 33 10
2972 Let me slip into something more comfortable. 1.3193 0.04360 166 121 37 8
2973 You look different from your online dating profile. 1.3193 0.04525 166 123 33 10
2974 OK— I give: Just what DOES a 'Night on the Town' mean to you? 1.3193 0.04443 166 122 35 9
2975 You look so different in person. 1.3193 0.04276 166 120 39 7
2976 I said I thought we could both benefit from a night of amour 1.3193 0.04761 166 126 27 13
2977 This isn’t what I meant by ‘date night’. 1.3193 0.04525 166 123 33 10
2978 You stopped shining a long time ago, honey 1.3193 0.04683 166 125 29 12
2979 I thought you were inviting me for a "night" out. 1.3193 0.04360 166 121 37 8
2980 Could I ask you a personal question? 1.3191 0.04160 188 138 40 10
2981 I said I wanted a night out, you idiot. N I G H T, as in opposite of DAY! 1.3191 0.04295 188 140 36 12
2982 You walk in the rain, don’t bring any oil and bitch because I don’t have a straw. 1.3190 0.04663 163 122 30 11
2983 I thought I was getting a night on the town. 1.3190 0.04497 163 120 34 9
2984 Not actually the roundtable I had imagined. 1.3190 0.04326 163 118 38 7
2985 Your acne scars really aren't that bad. 1.3190 0.04497 163 120 34 9
2986 '"I haven't done laundry since 1985." 1.3190 0.04743 163 123 28 12
2987 I’m tired of being accused of intimacy issues. 1.3190 0.04412 163 119 36 8
2988 I've decided that courtly love isn't all that it's cracked up to be. 1.3190 0.04497 163 120 34 9
2989 Not the grail you were hoping for huh? 1.3190 0.04147 163 116 42 5
2990 We're drinking Two Buck Charlemagne. 1.3190 0.04497 163 120 34 9
2991 This is one knight I’d like to forget! 1.3189 0.04205 185 136 39 10
2992 I just wanted to relive the old days. You always have to go too far. 1.3188 0.04723 160 120 29 11
2993 Empty suit to shining armor in half a glass. 1.3188 0.04639 160 119 31 10
2994 I thought you meant "Let's have a Knight Out"! 1.3188 0.04639 160 119 31 10
2995 You'll have to figure something else out. Straws have been banned from this restaurant. 1.3188 0.04966 160 123 23 14
2996 Sorry, but I usually don't go jousting on the first date. 1.3188 0.04466 160 117 35 8
2997 I promised you a knight to remember, not a night. It's not my fault you thought my autocorrect was acting up 1.3187 0.04251 182 134 38 10
2998 You don't look anything like your profile pic, either 1.3187 0.04391 182 136 34 12
2999 What did it cost you to take Uber from Camelot? 1.3187 0.04251 182 134 38 10
3000 I'm as hard as iron right now. 1.3185 0.04870 157 119 26 12
3001 I'm not sure. Your armor just isn't that shiny. 1.3185 0.04337 157 113 38 6
3002 Dancing, I said dinner and Dancing 1.3185 0.04611 157 116 32 9
3003 I work freelance too 1.3185 0.04699 157 117 30 10
3004 Oh I thought that your profile meant you were not a day time person. 1.3184 0.04370 179 133 35 11
3005 I would like a second glass but I know once a knight is enough. 1.3182 0.04565 176 133 30 13
3006 I’m worried the valet is going to ding my horse. 1.3182 0.04671 154 114 31 9
3007 Can we start making our knightly dinner more of a weekly thing? 1.3182 0.04565 176 133 30 13
3008 Is this your first experience with findyourknight.com? 1.3182 0.04486 154 112 35 7
3009 I've been hurt before-I'm not taking any chances this time. 1.3182 0.04671 154 114 31 9
3010 You did say knight in shining armor. 1.3182 0.04346 176 130 36 10
3011 I see you took my 'knight in shining armor' thing a bit too literally. 1.3182 0.04565 176 133 30 13
3012 You're not as shiny as you were in your picture. 1.3179 0.04310 195 147 34 14
3013 I only take off my helmet on the second date. 1.3179 0.04319 173 127 37 9
3014 What I’d give to have one night without a goddam dragon story. 1.3179 0.04472 173 129 33 11
3015 Let me propose a toast to a great knight 1.3179 0.04396 173 128 35 10
3016 To be honest, I meant to swipe left. 1.3179 0.04547 173 130 31 12
3017 Well, I promised you a knight to remember. 1.3179 0.03996 173 123 45 5
3018 And I thought that chivalry was dead. 1.3179 0.04396 173 128 35 10
3019 Don't you think it's time to say "good knight"? 1.3179 0.04396 173 128 35 10
3020 This gives "a blind date" a whole new meaning. 1.3179 0.04639 151 111 32 8
3021 Can I have a straw? 1.3179 0.04639 151 111 32 8
3022 No my dear, chivalry isn't dead 1.3179 0.04444 151 109 36 6
3023 We can't afford children until the steel tariffs are lowered. 1.3179 0.04543 151 110 34 7
3024 I just don't feel like we're happy ever-aftering any more. 1.3177 0.04165 192 142 39 11
3025 Actually? I thought you'd be a bit more shining. 1.3176 0.04602 170 128 30 12
3026 This isn't tinfoil. And I'm not being defensive. 1.3176 0.04289 170 124 38 8
3027 You need a knight out, they said. It will be fun, they said. 1.3176 0.04677 170 129 28 13
3028 You can rescue me from student loan debt. 1.3176 0.04369 170 125 36 9
3029 So, would you say you're a day person or a knight person? 1.3176 0.04448 170 126 34 10
3030 Want to spend the knight? 1.3176 0.04207 170 123 40 7
3031 Do you listen to heavy metal? 1.3176 0.04798 148 110 29 9
3032 Do you want me to get a funnel? 1.3176 0.04398 148 106 37 5
3033 Beyond jousting, what are your other interests? 1.3176 0.04701 148 109 31 8
3034 Clearly, you meant to select STEED dating. 1.3174 0.04659 167 126 29 12
3035 I guess your outfit is one way to avoid another #MeToo moment 1.3174 0.04502 167 124 33 10
3036 So! Exactly what did my sister tell you about me? 1.3174 0.04736 167 127 27 13
3037 Not tonight honey. 1.3172 0.04962 145 109 26 10
3038 I've enjoyed our conversation, but I think it's time to call it a knight. 1.3172 0.04864 145 108 28 9
3039 You know, those online profiles aren't meant to be taken literally. 1.3172 0.04255 186 138 37 11
3040 Okay, Sir Lancelot, you've got your Round Table. 1.3172 0.03898 186 133 47 6
3041 I dunno, maybe a straw? 1.3172 0.04519 186 142 29 15
3042 My ex said I was overprotective. 1.3171 0.03924 205 150 45 10
3043 I'm your knight in shining armor. Be careful what you wish for. 1.3171 0.04557 164 122 32 10
3044 I appreciate the effort, but it was more like a metaphor I was using in the "What I'm Looking For" section. 1.3171 0.04216 164 118 40 6
3045 You got your first wish so don't complain! 1.3171 0.04304 164 119 38 7
3046 Would you please ask the somelier to send the plumber. 1.3171 0.04304 164 119 38 7
3047 Oh so "wild Knight" was a typo huh... 1.3168 0.04084 202 150 40 12
3048 I'm very good at protecting myself from criticism. 1.3168 0.04443 161 118 35 8
3049 Why, yes, it DOES have a metallic after-taste. 1.3168 0.04529 161 119 33 9
3050 I hear the dragon burger is locally sourced. 1.3168 0.04443 161 118 35 8
3051 Now I know when my girlfriend txt'd me that dinner with you would be a knight to remember it wasn't a spell check glitch. 1.3168 0.04443 161 118 35 8
3052 So? This is a Blind Date, isn't it? 1.3168 0.04172 161 115 41 5
3053 OK, I'll give you that, it is a round table" 1.3168 0.04354 161 117 37 7
3054 Cuts down on the snacking. 1.3168 0.04172 161 115 41 5
3055 So why do you always call me defensive? 1.3168 0.04443 161 118 35 8
3056 We don't use plastic straws any more. 1.3165 0.04407 158 115 36 7
3057 it's just a figure of speech 1.3165 0.04407 158 115 36 7
3058 I’m still going to call it a night” 1.3165 0.04673 158 118 30 10
3059 Errant indeed. 1.3165 0.04315 158 114 38 6
3060 You looked more like a damsel in distress in your photos. 1.3165 0.04586 158 117 32 9
3061 You're even more impenetrable than the wine list. 1.3164 0.04543 177 134 30 13
3062 You said in your profile that you were looking for your knight in shining armor. 1.3164 0.04174 177 129 40 8
3063 I know I said I wanted a knight in shining armor, but for once can’t you listen to me rather than trying to immediately solve my problem. 1.3164 0.04251 177 130 38 9
3064 Are you gonna squeak again when you shake the salt? 1.3164 0.04251 177 130 38 9
3065 Like this Bordeaux, you've aged well. 1.3163 0.04104 196 145 40 11
3066 This is why I hate dating near Halloween. 1.3161 0.04366 155 112 37 6
3067 My mom said no solo dates without the armor until this who MeToo thing blows over. 1.3161 0.04908 155 118 25 12
3068 I could use a straw. 1.3161 0.04735 155 116 29 10
3069 Your profile stated that you were looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.3161 0.04993 155 119 23 13
3070 Well at least I'll be able to use the word "literally" correctly 1.3161 0.04554 155 114 33 8
3071 You look nothing like your profile. 1.3161 0.04375 174 129 35 10
3072 Closed and musty, with tinny overtones. 1.3161 0.04141 174 126 41 7
3073 It's been a long time since I've had such a nice knight out. 1.3161 0.04375 174 129 35 10
3074 Hey, you were the one who asked for a date knight. 1.3161 0.04524 174 131 31 12
3075 I have a feeling you are hard to get close to. 1.3161 0.04141 174 126 41 7
3076 Well the dating service said you wanted to have a fun knight. 1.3161 0.04375 174 129 35 10
3077 My interests include: long walks on the beach, stabbing people in the heart, and a nice glass of Merlot. 1.3161 0.04220 174 127 39 8
3078 I was hoping for a 'fun night', but let's see where this goes. 1.3158 0.04420 152 110 36 6
3079 I feel safe,but it's hard to text. 1.3158 0.04190 190 141 38 11
3080 Look, you didn't say what kind of suit I had to wear for this restaurant 1.3158 0.04190 190 141 38 11
3081 Well, you DID say on Tinder that you were an armored car driver. 1.3155 0.04235 187 139 37 11
3082 You should know I'm not a sword-in-the-stone-on-a-first-date kind of girl. 1.3155 0.04712 168 128 27 13
3083 Ever since Trump declared it was a scary time for men, you've had your guard up! 1.3155 0.04712 168 128 27 13
3084 A straw, maybe? 1.3155 0.04635 168 127 29 12
3085 I want true amor, not armor. 1.3154 0.04576 149 109 33 7
3086 Don't worry, my codpiece is welded shut. 1.3154 0.04576 149 109 33 7
3087 The best rust proofing spray is on Amazon. 1.3154 0.04864 149 112 27 10
3088 This wasn't the kind of knight I was expecting... 1.3152 0.04140 184 135 40 9
3089 Sorry, but I don't think I really see myself as a damsel in distress 1.3152 0.04694 165 125 28 12
3090 Why are you so defensive all the time? 1.3152 0.04533 165 123 32 10
3091 Well, you’re always complaining I chew with my mouth open. 1.3152 0.04614 165 124 30 11
3092 I know you're exited about your new costume Harold. But Halloween is in two weeks. You'll be rusty by then. 1.3152 0.04451 165 122 34 9
3093 When you said I was going to have a special night, I wasn't picturing this. 1.3152 0.04451 165 122 34 9
3094 I can't settle for anything less than an iron-clad pre-nup, Sally. Take it or leave it. 1.3149 0.04111 181 132 41 8
3095 No I am NOT going to help you in the bathroom. 1.3149 0.04035 181 131 43 7
3096 So, the suit of armor on display picture was actually you? 1.3149 0.04111 181 132 41 8
3097 Aren't you taking the "fear" of the Me-Too Movement a little far... 1.3148 0.04834 162 124 25 13
3098 I know this is only our third date Phyllis but I thought I'd bring protection 1.3148 0.04505 162 120 33 9
3099 You can't be too careful on a first internet date. 1.3148 0.04332 162 118 37 7
3100 I was looking for a different kind of wild night. 1.3148 0.04505 162 120 33 9
3101 Just my luck with that no straw thing. 1.3148 0.04505 162 120 33 9
3102 I kinda like the Knight in Shining Armor bit, but the hair-piece is way over the top." 1.3148 0.04420 162 119 35 8
3103 It’s not shining. 1.3148 0.04505 162 120 33 9
3104 I suppose I could order you a straw, but that's frowned upon. 1.3147 0.04485 143 103 35 5
3105 This was not my idea of date knight 1.3146 0.04378 178 133 34 11
3106 I sense a vulnerability concern .. 1.3146 0.04305 178 132 36 10
3107 Oh, it’s fine. I’m just relieved it really WAS your javelin. 1.3146 0.04793 178 139 22 17
3108 Chivalry aside, you lack a likeness to your profile photo. 1.3146 0.03999 178 128 44 6
3109 Don't tell me; it was that or a shirt with a collar. 1.3146 0.04305 178 132 36 10
3110 'I swiped right for a good night, not a good knight...' 1.3145 0.04562 159 118 32 9
3111 Not quite what I had in mind when I mentioned a night of amour. 1.3145 0.04898 159 122 24 13
3112 "Wine, check. Chivalry, check. Wearing protection, checkmate. 1.3143 0.04121 175 127 41 7
3113 I thought you meant dinner and armour. 1.3143 0.04277 175 129 37 9
3114 So, what was it about me that made you "Swipe Right?" 1.3143 0.04871 140 104 28 8
3115 You do realize you can wear regular clothes to Medieval Times? 1.3141 0.04237 191 143 36 12
3116 Apparently Tinder spellchecked ‘sense of humor’ to ‘suit of armor’ 1.3141 0.03968 191 139 44 8
3117 Sorry, but I'm not feeling maidenly tonight. 1.3141 0.04881 156 119 25 12
3118 I'm thinking a sip or two should open up a few things. 1.3140 0.04481 172 129 32 11
3119 What? Am I not shining enough? 1.3140 0.04404 172 128 34 10
3120 It's date n-i-g-h-t. 1.3140 0.03999 172 123 44 5
3121 Gentle on the tongue but a truncheon finish. 1.3140 0.04404 172 128 34 10
3122 A.A. is easier. 1.3140 0.04404 172 128 34 10
3123 I know straws are environmentally unfriendly but I could really use one. 1.3140 0.04915 172 135 20 17
3124 You probably don't remember this, but we were in high school together. 1.3140 0.04084 172 124 42 6
3125 To be honest, I lied about may age on the dating site. 1.3140 0.04404 172 128 34 10
3126 So, I would have to polish it once a week? 1.3140 0.04481 172 129 32 11
3127 I'm on the thirteenth step—my visor is welded shut. 1.3139 0.04720 137 100 31 6
3128 I firmly believe that chivalry is not dead. 1.3138 0.03636 188 132 53 3
3129 Who says chivalry is dead? 1.3137 0.04771 153 115 28 10
3130 Yeah, I know I said that I wanted a night out. 1.3137 0.04587 153 113 32 8
3131 Lady’s Knight. 1.3137 0.04771 153 115 28 10
3132 You are taking Date Knight too seriously. 1.3136 0.04835 169 131 23 15
3133 I snuck in a straw for you. 1.3136 0.04376 169 125 35 9
3134 I thought it was just some silly cliche women put in their dating profiles. 1.3136 0.04612 169 128 29 12
3135 Yes, I've been in distress for years. 1.3136 0.04376 169 125 35 9
3136 Well. You're online bio did say that I would have 'a knight to remember'. 1.3136 0.04534 169 127 31 11
3137 Honestly, Bob, you'd think we're in the Dark Ages... 1.3136 0.04212 169 123 39 7
3138 Now I see what they meant by a blind date. 1.3135 0.04192 185 137 38 10
3139 Well, I read 'your knight in shining armor' on your profile, but I didn't expect this! 1.3135 0.04121 185 136 40 9
3140 Would it be gauche of me to ask for a straw? 1.3134 0.03839 201 146 47 8
3141 I'm new to the dating game and I don't want to get hurt. 1.3133 0.04349 150 108 37 5
3142 I thought you might be more comfortable at this cafe since the tables are round. 1.3133 0.04647 150 111 31 8
3143 In my defense, you said on eharmony that you wanted "a knight in shining armor." 1.3133 0.04345 166 122 36 8
3144 Is this your first blind date, too? 1.3133 0.04747 166 127 26 13
3145 My fantasy was just metaphorical I hope you know 1.3133 0.04345 166 122 36 8
3146 You just seem... so guarded... so defensive. 1.3133 0.04345 166 122 36 8
3147 My profile said knight in shining armor, didn’t it? 1.3133 0.04428 166 123 34 9
3148 I like to maintain boundaries 1.3132 0.04378 182 137 33 12
3149 Are you going to keep you guard up all night? 1.3129 0.04507 147 107 34 6
3150 My table at work is way bigger 1.3129 0.04904 147 111 26 10
3151 Women I date say I'm defensive. I just don't see it. 1.3129 0.04648 163 123 29 11
3152 Not what I had in mind when I suggested we have a date night. 1.3129 0.04130 163 117 41 5
3153 And you say your name is Lance? 1.3129 0.04310 163 119 37 7
3154 I just got back from the Levant. I trust you're still wearing your chastity belt. 1.3129 0.04566 163 122 31 10
3155 The waiter forgot my straw. 1.3129 0.04566 163 122 31 10
3156 ”””” “Well, I guess there’s no penetrating your armor, is there? 1.3129 0.04482 163 121 33 9
3157 So, how long have you been on eHarmony? 1.3128 0.04210 179 132 38 9
3158 This is the best knight out, I have ever had. 1.3128 0.04428 179 135 32 12
3159 I know I said it was OK if you went to night school. 1.3128 0.03980 179 129 44 6
3160 Maybe you should ask for a straw. 1.3128 0.04499 179 136 30 13
3161 I love Taco Tuesday and Throwback Thursday. Not at all sure about Medieval Monday. 1.3128 0.04135 179 131 40 8
3162 Yes, well...I'm more of a *verbal* jouster... 1.3128 0.04135 179 131 40 8
3163 And then there's too much chivalry. 1.3128 0.04110 195 145 39 11
3164 I know it's our first date, but you could open up a little 1.3125 0.04022 176 127 43 6
3165 When I said I was looking for a knight in shining armor, I did not mean that literally. 1.3125 0.04623 160 120 30 10
3166 This is not my idea of a night on the town 1.3125 0.04480 176 133 31 12
3167 Is this not what you meant when you said you wanted a knight out? 1.3125 0.04590 192 150 24 18
3168 Knight in shining armor was only a cliche for me. 1.3125 0.04081 160 114 42 4
3169 So, when did speed dating get painful for you? 1.3125 0.04459 144 104 35 5
3170 Was I supposed to wear a chastity belt? 1.3125 0.04282 192 145 34 13
3171 Fetch me a straw my lady 1.3122 0.03991 189 138 43 8
3172 When I said "night-cap", that's not exactly what I had in mind. 1.3122 0.03991 189 138 43 8
3173 I warm up the crowds at presidential rallies. You? 1.3121 0.04305 173 128 36 9
3174 I might not be the great night out you were expecting, Carla, but at least I know how to spell. 1.3121 0.04607 173 132 28 13
3175 Will you ask the waiter if I could get a straw for my wine? 1.3121 0.03980 173 124 44 5
3176 Yes but what's your day job? 1.3121 0.04146 173 126 40 7
3177 I thought your profile said you liked romantic date knights. 1.3121 0.04146 173 126 40 7
3178 I think we should see other people... 1.3121 0.04382 173 129 34 10
3179 I don’t know David it still seems like you’re a little defensive. 1.3121 0.04595 157 117 31 9
3180 Actually, I'm more transparent than I appear. 1.3121 0.04595 157 117 31 9
3181 I know your dating profile says you consider yourself old-fashioned and chivalrous, but I think you're taking it a bit too far.... 1.3121 0.04505 157 116 33 8
3182 Would you mind if I ask for a straw? 1.3121 0.04505 157 116 33 8
3183 In your profile pic, your armor is much younger... 1.3118 0.04242 186 139 36 11
3184 I think I'm at the wrong round table... 1.3118 0.04173 186 138 38 10
3185 This is nice. I have not had a nice dinner in ages. 1.3118 0.04173 186 138 38 10
3186 What do you mean, "knight in shining armor" is a figure of speech? 1.3118 0.04274 170 125 37 8
3187 I'm a cabinet member. I have to dress like this when I dine out. 1.3118 0.04663 170 130 27 13
3188 SWF seeking KISA 1.3118 0.04434 170 127 33 10
3189 Please believe me, Dorothy. I really have changed. 1.3118 0.04663 170 130 27 13
3190 Please, once a knight is enough! 1.3118 0.04274 170 125 37 8
3191 You're getting a bit rusty with this romance stuff 1.3118 0.04354 170 126 35 9
3192 I've had a hard time allowing myself to be vulnerable since my last relationship ended. 1.3117 0.04745 154 116 28 10
3193 I took a chastity pledge. 1.3117 0.04468 154 113 34 7
3194 My lawyer told me this will help prevent sexual harrassment claims against me. 1.3117 0.04833 154 117 26 11
3195 E-armory!! 1.3117 0.04562 154 114 32 8
3196 Are you gonna drink that? 1.3116 0.03989 199 147 42 10
3197 It takes care of the sticks and stones part. 1.3115 0.03923 183 132 45 6
3198 Yeah- blah,blah, blah, your life is tough. Try drinking wine through a helmet. 1.3115 0.04218 183 136 37 10
3199 You, My Lady, are not what I expected. 1.3115 0.04426 183 139 31 13
3200 Dad, I can appreciate you trying to look "European" but the present administration doesn't like immigrants of ANY kind. . . 1.3115 0.04358 183 138 33 12
3201 You didn't wonder why on my personal ad I said your name had to be 'Guinevere '? 1.3115 0.04218 183 136 37 10
3202 As their conversation became more stilted, Marjorie realized that this would not be a knight to remember. 1.3114 0.04798 167 129 24 14
3203 This is not what I meant when I said we should have a night out. 1.3114 0.04487 167 125 32 10
3204 My therapist says it’ll help me conquer my fear of dating. 1.3114 0.04406 167 124 34 9
3205 I told you, they stopped offering straws. 1.3114 0.04645 167 127 28 12
3206 Did my dating app profile not make clear I'm a literal knight in shining armor? 1.3114 0.04645 167 127 28 12
3207 Darn spellcheck. I meant to text, "Mon Amour" 1.3113 0.04525 151 111 33 7
3208 You should know, that suit seemed much shiner on your Tinder profile. 1.3113 0.04525 151 111 33 7
3209 My apologies, Good Lady - I appear to have taken your online dating profile too literally. 1.3112 0.04218 196 148 35 13
3210 I'll ask for a straw. 1.3111 0.04116 180 132 40 8
3211 The caveman diet didn't work for me so now I'm trying the iron man diet. 1.3111 0.04477 180 137 30 13
3212 Would it look strange if I used a straw? 1.3111 0.04264 180 134 36 10
3213 It's been 20 minutes since we ordered a funnel. 1.3110 0.04199 164 119 39 6
3214 And you said chivalry was dead. 1.3110 0.04374 164 121 35 8
3215 Shall I ask for a straw for you? 1.3110 0.04542 164 123 31 10
3216 It’s Halloween Karen, give me a break. 1.3110 0.04374 164 121 35 8
3217 You've been a great friend, through good, bad, and medieval times. 1.3110 0.04374 164 121 35 8
3218 Your knight is about to get a whole lot better. 1.3109 0.04199 193 145 36 12
3219 What do you mean I should let my guard down? 1.3108 0.04482 148 108 34 6
3220 This is not my idea of a "knight to remember". 1.3107 0.04529 177 135 29 13
3221 Sorry, I misinterpreted you when you said you wanted a date night. 1.3107 0.04236 177 131 37 9
3222 I thought you said a "night" out. 1.3107 0.04312 177 132 35 10
3223 Actually I was hoping for a night out. 1.3107 0.04385 177 133 33 11
3224 Your online profile said, "in shining armor"... 1.3107 0.04312 177 132 35 10
3225 Trust me, chivalry is not dead. 1.3107 0.04160 177 130 39 8
3226 I know last year’s flu vaccine was only forty percent effective, but aren’t you overcompensating? 1.3107 0.04669 177 137 25 15
3227 Quite frankly, I'm a day person." 1.3106 0.04338 161 118 36 7
3228 Wow, you weren't kidding when you said you were old-fashioned. 1.3106 0.04513 161 120 32 9
3229 So, your favorite brand of clothing is Under Armour? 1.3106 0.04598 161 121 30 10
3230 You know, there's more to chivalry than getting us seated at a round table. 1.3106 0.04426 161 119 34 8
3231 Your privilege is still showing. 1.3106 0.04247 161 117 38 6
3232 Whoa, you're not going to get all medieval on me, are you? 1.3106 0.04247 161 117 38 6
3233 Your online profile said that you were "looking for a knight in shining armour." 1.3106 0.04513 161 120 32 9
3234 Do you have a straw I can use? 1.3106 0.04426 161 119 34 8
3235 You looked far less defensive in your profile picture on Tinder 1.3103 0.04584 174 133 28 13
3236 I sometimes have bad days too, but I usually just stay home 1.3103 0.04644 145 107 31 7
3237 Wait, you came here ON your mustang? 1.3103 0.04361 174 130 34 10
3238 When I asked for a night out on the town, this wasn’t what I was expecting. 1.3103 0.04746 145 108 29 8
3239 When I said I was looking for my knight in shining armor I was speaking metaphorically. 1.3102 0.04084 187 138 40 9
3240 Don’t tell me to get that look off my face 1.3101 0.04570 158 118 31 9
3241 Mosquitoes don't bite me anymore. 1.3101 0.04481 158 117 33 8
3242 I think I’m more of a morning person 1.3101 0.04481 158 117 33 8
3243 So...now...tell me about the last "damsel in distress" 1.3101 0.04297 158 115 37 6
3244 It's a mead market out there. 1.3101 0.04390 158 116 35 7
3245 I want you to wear it honey. It's a very scary time for young men in America. 1.3101 0.04910 158 122 23 13
3246 Don't you think you're taking this Knights of Columbus thing a little too far? 1.3099 0.04489 171 129 31 11
3247 It's called Over Armor honey, we're going to make a fortune ! 1.3099 0.04411 171 128 33 10
3248 Distress? Not really. Why do you ask? 1.3099 0.04411 171 128 33 10
3249 Just don't claim those gloves will stop you from picking up the check. 1.3099 0.04411 171 128 33 10
3250 Yes, I'm disappointed. I thought you said you liked foreplay not swordplay. 1.3099 0.05016 142 108 24 10
3251 Literally and figuratively, Rusty 1.3098 0.04198 184 137 37 10
3252 Once a king, always a king but once a night is enough. 1.3098 0.03905 184 133 45 6
3253 An uneasy silence descended over the first date after Carol realized her Medieval Jousting knowledge was lacking. 1.3097 0.04251 155 112 38 5
3254 Not quite what I meant when I asked for a night out. 1.3097 0.04718 155 117 28 10
3255 Maybe it's the light, but your armor isn't shining. 1.3097 0.04444 155 114 34 7
3256 Maybe you should buy some more casual suits. 1.3095 0.04383 168 125 34 9
3257 I think the problem is we both have hard exteriors. 1.3095 0.04383 168 125 34 9
3258 Getting served here is like getting a sword from a stone! 1.3095 0.04621 168 128 28 12
3259 It's been hellish since they stopped giving out straws 1.3095 0.04464 168 126 32 10
3260 I guess this means "no" 1.3095 0.03845 210 155 45 10
3261 When the waiter comes back I’ll ask him for a straw. 1.3095 0.04218 168 123 38 7
3262 I don't think we're supposed to ask for straws anymore. 1.3095 0.04543 168 127 30 11
3263 You're not as shiny as your profile picture. 1.3095 0.04383 168 125 34 9
3264 The sliced cheese platter I ordered pairs nicely with the wine and the slits in my helmet 1.3095 0.04697 168 129 26 13
3265 Lance, we need to talk... 1.3095 0.04301 168 124 36 8
3266 I didn't mean a knight in shining armor literally... 1.3094 0.04244 181 135 36 10
3267 Did you even notice my new plume before I mentioned it? 1.3094 0.03785 181 129 48 4
3268 Chivalry only goes so far, Henry. We’re not going to grow, unless you let your defenses down. 1.3094 0.05191 139 107 21 11
3269 I thought your username 'knight@night41' just meant you were a romantic. 1.3092 0.04499 152 112 33 7
3270 I guess I’m your knight in shining armor might be one you’ve heard before. 1.3092 0.04402 152 111 35 6
3271 I think a straw would work. 1.3092 0.04689 152 114 29 9
3272 When you called, I thought you said, 'night of amour' " 1.3092 0.04689 152 114 29 9
3273 Truth be known, I need a straw but I’m always embarrassed to ask. 1.3092 0.03758 207 151 48 8
3274 OK, but I'm drawing the line at painting the floors checkerboard. 1.3091 0.04757 165 127 25 13
3275 When I accepted your date invitation, I didn’t realize you were literally a knight in shining armor. 1.3091 0.04351 165 122 35 8
3276 Your armor’s not as shiny as you let on. 1.3091 0.04266 165 121 37 7
3277 I’m not a princess. So you can stop with the M’lady. 1.3091 0.04351 165 122 35 8
3278 Your profile described you as a woman with old-fashioned values. 1.3091 0.04351 165 122 35 8
3279 I’m not making small talk because most of my questions have been answered just by your appearance. 1.3090 0.04507 178 136 29 13
3280 Your armor was shinier on Facebook. 1.3090 0.04364 178 134 33 11
3281 Yo Launcelot, your turn to open up. 1.3090 0.03903 178 128 45 5
3282 We're collegial when we're not crusading. 1.3090 0.04216 178 132 37 9
3283 I like to protect myself on first dates. 1.3089 0.04159 191 143 37 11
3284 You're very serious about safe sex 1.3089 0.04024 191 141 41 9
3285 Coming out should be easy once you get a blow torch. 1.3089 0.04092 191 142 39 10
3286 Now that we're alone,I think you can let down your guard. 1.3087 0.04557 149 110 32 7
3287 Sorry, you're not quite shiny enough. 1.3086 0.04315 162 119 36 7
3288 I never leave the house without protection. 1.3086 0.04225 162 118 38 6
3289 You’re more metallic than I expected. 1.3086 0.04489 162 121 32 9
3290 “It’s stainless. I didn’t think you’d like cheap chivalry” 1.3086 0.04489 162 121 32 9
3291 Reality somehow paled in comparison to her imagination when Edna actually won the "Live Your Favorite Harlequin Romance!" sweepstakes... 1.3086 0.04819 162 125 24 13
3292 You're always on the defensive. 1.3086 0.04574 162 122 30 10
3293 I did say I was looking for my knight in shining armor, but I'm also looking for a man willing to be a bit more vulnerable. 1.3086 0.04574 162 122 30 10
3294 The first cut was the deepest. 1.3086 0.04403 162 120 34 8
3295 I promised you a knight on the town. 1.3086 0.04574 162 122 30 10
3296 'I know it's a blind date, but this is ridiculous!' 1.3086 0.04134 162 117 40 5
3297 Our corporate office advises we not even flirt with our eyes. 1.3086 0.04489 162 121 32 9
3298 Your armour looked a lot more shiny in your profile picture. 1.3086 0.04403 162 120 34 8
3299 You said you wanted more chivalry. 1.3086 0.03859 175 125 46 4
3300 The app is literally called "Date Knight." You were expecting a noble? 1.3086 0.04263 175 130 36 9
3301 This isn't exactly what I had in mind when you called to ask if I was interested in a night on the town. 1.3086 0.04414 175 132 32 11
3302 I am not amused, Arthur, and I'm no damn fairy princess. 1.3086 0.04263 175 130 36 9
3303 The aluminum-foil hat made me look like a nut. 1.3085 0.04529 188 146 26 16
3304 Down deep I'm a sensitive guy but I've been hurt too many times. 1.3085 0.04203 188 141 36 11
3305 A straw? You should be more concerned about a zipper ! 1.3085 0.04336 188 143 32 13
3306 Chivalry may not be dead, but this relationship is. 1.3085 0.04270 188 142 34 12
3307 You know you spelled night wrong when you invited me to one I'd never forget. 1.3082 0.04914 146 111 25 10
3308 Now you get off your high horse. 1.3082 0.04367 159 117 35 7
3309 If you hear a little ping coming from my armor, you will then know this date is going well. 1.3082 0.04545 159 119 31 9
3310 Judith, I'm not who you think I am; but then, I'm not who I think I am either. 1.3082 0.04717 159 121 27 11
3311 How was work? Let's just say it's been a hard day's kni- You know what? Forget it. 1.3081 0.04232 172 127 37 8
3312 Not quite what I had in mind when you suggested a quiet night out on the town... 1.3081 0.04068 172 125 41 6
3313 Am I of the same caliber as your ex? 1.3081 0.04389 172 129 33 10
3314 You and my ex are as different as knight and day 1.3081 0.04389 172 129 33 10
3315 I understand, you just don't want to get hurt again." 1.3081 0.04108 185 137 39 9
3316 Is this your idea of a romantic knight 1.3081 0.04179 185 138 37 10
3317 George asked me to tell you he doesn't want to see you anymore. 1.3077 0.04361 169 126 34 9
3318 No, a straw would not be couth. 1.3077 0.04325 156 114 36 6
3319 Darn that autocorrect! I typed 'amore'. 1.3077 0.04569 182 141 26 15
3320 There wasn’t any rust in your profile photo. 1.3077 0.04441 169 127 32 10
3321 It's my knight out 1.3077 0.04196 169 124 38 7
3322 When you told me you'd be a night to remember, I had no idea . . . 1.3077 0.04002 182 133 42 7
3323 Yep, the dragon's dead. Now tell me about your libido. 1.3077 0.04441 169 127 32 10
3324 I like how we still go out, even now we've reached our middle ages. 1.3077 0.04434 182 139 30 13
3325 Would you think me less a gentleman if I requested a straw? 1.3077 0.04361 169 126 34 9
3326 Mama called it chivalry but I just call it dress up. 1.3077 0.04597 169 129 28 12
3327 Cheval Blanc St-Emilion '47 through a plastic straw? Surely, you joust. 1.3073 0.04206 192 145 35 12
3328 I see you didn't get the metaphor. 1.3073 0.04343 179 135 33 11
3329 I wish I could pierce your armor. 1.3073 0.04121 179 132 39 8
3330 So when you say good night, you mean what exactly? 1.3073 0.04343 179 135 33 11
3331 At my age, I have to get iron anywhere I can. 1.3073 0.04415 179 136 31 12
3332 I taste oak and fruit, with just a hint of metal. 1.3073 0.04485 179 137 29 13
3333 Full bodied, with a hint of rust. 1.3073 0.04343 179 135 33 11
3334 Honey, not all men behave like Supreme Court justices. 1.3073 0.04044 179 131 41 7
3335 When you said you’re a night person on your profile, you weren’t kidding. 1.3073 0.04343 179 135 33 11
3336 So when you said, dinner and tournament, you were serious? 1.3073 0.04485 179 137 29 13
3337 Oh, yeah? Well, your personality isn't exactly shining, either. 1.3072 0.03977 166 119 43 4
3338 Well, why did you think the app was called DateKnight? 1.3072 0.04157 166 121 39 6
3339 Well, I must admit Sir Galahad, you don’t look much like your profile picture. 1.3072 0.04068 166 120 41 5
3340 I know it's not the all knight diner you were hoping for, but you could finally get Sir Loin. 1.3072 0.04413 166 124 33 9
3341 Sorry, but I don't know if I'm really enjoying my knight out on the town. 1.3072 0.04495 166 125 31 10
3342 Well, I thought silver singles meant something else... 1.3072 0.04495 166 125 31 10
3343 Well, I wouldn’t say I’m in distress. I just have some misgivings about choices I’ve made. 1.3072 0.04570 153 114 31 8
3344 I get it, already: you're chivalrous. 1.3072 0.04475 153 113 33 7
3345 I know you hate Italian but it’s the only place left that hasn’t banned straws. 1.3072 0.04570 153 114 31 8
3346 Best knight out I've had in months. 1.3072 0.04475 153 113 33 7
3347 All that talk on Tinder about a 'knight in shining armor' was only meant to be metaphorical, you know. 1.3071 0.05058 140 107 23 10
3348 Adelsheim, it's our 4th date, when will you let your guard down? 1.3069 0.04047 189 140 40 9
3349 Sorry, straws have been banned. 1.3069 0.04445 189 146 28 15
3350 It's been 15 years,Brad. The "I'm your knight-in-shining armor" shtick is getting old. 1.3068 0.04318 176 132 34 10
3351 Actually, the posting said "a night in shining amour." 1.3068 0.04393 176 133 32 11
3352 I'm not a feminist; I just don't think the waiter deserved to die because I didn't like the wine he suggested. 1.3068 0.04393 176 133 32 11
3353 No. I'm Steely DON. 1.3067 0.04466 163 122 32 9
3354 Stop Frowning. All I asked for is a straw. 1.3067 0.04380 163 121 34 8
3355 Well, I have been compared to a battleaxe before. 1.3067 0.04204 163 119 38 6
3356 This wasn't exactly what I meant when I said I wanted a nice night out. 1.3067 0.04466 163 122 32 9
3357 I realized it's best to get the 'night-in-shining-armor' fantasy over with on the first date. 1.3067 0.04632 163 124 28 11
3358 No, I don't have any straws. 1.3067 0.04113 163 118 40 5
3359 The War of the Roses was a much scarier time for men. 1.3067 0.04550 163 123 30 10
3360 I know I said I was looking for a knight in shining armor, but I meant it metaphorically. 1.3067 0.04380 163 121 34 8
3361 I propose a toast to buns of steel. 1.3067 0.05090 150 117 20 13
3362 I can't tell if you're a man afraid of your past, or a woman afraid of the future. 1.3067 0.05001 150 116 22 12
3363 You said to wear your best suit. 1.3067 0.04432 150 110 34 6
3364 I recently switched to red wine, I heard its good for the joints. 1.3067 0.04725 150 113 28 9
3365 John, you’re taking this ‘Battle of the Sexes’ thing way too serious! 1.3065 0.03912 199 147 43 9
3366 Can you ask for a straw? 1.3065 0.04017 186 137 41 8
3367 Sorry for the armor, but I'm told it's not safe for young men these days. 1.3064 0.04665 173 134 25 14
3368 Are you getting notes of rust in this wine. 1.3064 0.04368 173 130 33 10
3369 “No no...I’m not the Frog Prince” 1.3064 0.04444 173 131 31 11
3370 So, is this how women working at the Supreme Court dress these days? I start on Monday 1.3064 0.04444 173 131 31 11
3371 Are you worried about comittment? 1.3061 0.04885 147 112 25 10
3372 What color horse do you ride? 1.3060 0.04344 183 139 32 12
3373 You hate it, don't you? It was my best try for a vintage look." 1.3060 0.04881 134 100 27 7
3374 I said, “I’d like to spend a NIGHT With you.” 1.3059 0.04419 170 128 32 10
3375 When I said date night, this isn't what I meant. 1.3059 0.04339 170 127 34 9
3376 When I said you were my Knight in Shining Armor, I didn't mean you should take it literally. 1.3059 0.04419 170 128 32 10
3377 This is not exactly what I meant by 'a night to remember'. 1.3059 0.04339 170 127 34 9
3378 I'm tough on the outside, but hollow on the inside 1.3059 0.04573 170 130 28 12
3379 I have been hurt so often. 1.3057 0.04488 157 117 32 8
3380 I'm no longer a vulnerable male 1.3057 0.04302 157 115 36 6
3381 I was really just looking for Mr. Goodbar. 1.3057 0.04578 157 118 30 9
3382 You ready for a Knightcap? 1.3057 0.04187 193 146 35 12
3383 Has anyone ever told you that you look like Lancelot? 1.3057 0.04056 193 144 39 10
3384 I feel like I'm not getting through to you. 1.3057 0.03921 193 142 43 8
3385 Don't ask me to dance again. 1.3056 0.04250 180 135 35 10
3386 I really think once a knight is enough. 1.3056 0.04176 180 134 37 9
3387 Dragons no, but i can slay your monthly cable bill. 1.3056 0.04176 180 134 37 9
3388 And to think ... my therapist said I shouldn't wait around for someone like you. 1.3056 0.04601 180 140 25 15
3389 On second thought, a knight in shining armor isn’t what I’m looking for, Roger. 1.3056 0.04025 180 132 41 7
3390 Something grilled, perhaps? 1.3056 0.04438 144 105 34 5
3391 You know, true chivalry isn't really about picking up the tab. 1.3056 0.03947 180 131 43 6
3392 All my dates just seem to get older and older. 1.3054 0.04390 167 125 33 9
3393 Date N-I-G-H-T. I meant N-I-G-H-T! 1.3054 0.04471 167 126 31 10
3394 So the "Knight in Shinning Armor" in your personal ad was just a figure of speech? 1.3054 0.04707 167 129 25 13
3395 Actually, I might buy the whole "shining armor" thing if it hadn't been for watching you try to drink that pinot noir and seeing it dribble down your breastplate. 1.3054 0.04048 167 121 41 5
3396 Well, my ad did say "I will be your knight in shining armor". 1.3054 0.03866 167 119 45 3
3397 Yes, you have beautiful manners, but you do seem a bit defensive. 1.3053 0.04231 190 144 34 12
3398 Sorry, Lancelot, but tonight is not your night. 1.3052 0.04544 154 115 31 8
3399 Ok. Next youre going you ask me if I have any WD40 on me.. 1.3052 0.04637 154 116 29 9
3400 I feel like you're listening, but you aren't really hearing. 1.3052 0.04450 154 114 33 7
3401 I'm not up for a one night stand. 1.3051 0.04145 177 131 38 8
3402 My therapist said I should be carful what I wish for 1.3051 0.04145 177 131 38 8
3403 Oh. I thought you meant it literally. 1.3051 0.04067 177 130 40 7
3404 I promise that after a few drinks, l ‘ll loosen up and come out of my shell. 1.3051 0.03906 177 128 44 5
3405 What are you drinking... W1040? 1.3051 0.04656 177 138 24 15
3406 You’re open. I’m closed. 1.3051 0.03823 177 127 46 4
3407 I feel like you’re very guarded. 1.3051 0.04222 177 132 36 9
3408 Thou doth not resemble thine dating portrait. 1.3050 0.05027 141 108 23 10
3409 Yeah, I know what my profile said. But seriously...you've never heard of a metaphor? 1.3050 0.05127 141 109 21 11
3410 Let me guess, you couldn't get valet parking for horse? 1.3050 0.04821 141 106 27 8
3411 Well, to be honest it does not shine like your profile led me to believe. 1.3049 0.04442 164 123 32 9
3412 Yeah that's what a girl wants, but to literally wear the armor? 1.3049 0.04526 164 124 30 10
3413 Your profile clearly stated "for a good night out." 1.3049 0.04271 164 121 36 7
3414 I'm rethinking that 'knight in shining armor' thing. 1.3049 0.04442 164 123 32 9
3415 To be completely honest, you don't look a thing like your profile photo. 1.3049 0.04357 164 122 34 8
3416 Wasted daze and wasted knights. 1.3046 0.04791 151 115 26 10
3417 This is not my idea of a "knight" out. 1.3046 0.04506 151 112 32 7
3418 So, leaving the sword in the stone made a difference? 1.3046 0.04506 151 112 32 7
3419 Unfortunately, there are limited opportunities for jousting. 1.3046 0.04791 151 115 26 10
3420 You look a lot older in person.... 1.3046 0.04110 174 128 39 7
3421 Does your Provider consider that a joint replacement? 1.3043 0.04321 161 119 35 7
3422 In the Tinder sphere, the context of wearing protection has a slightly different meaning. 1.3043 0.04230 161 118 37 6
3423 say what you want, it's definitely cut down the amount of wine you've been drinking. 1.3043 0.04040 184 136 40 8
3424 Don’t expect a good knight kiss. 1.3043 0.04255 184 139 34 11
3425 On Tinder the armor was intriguing. Now, it is just weird. 1.3043 0.04321 161 119 35 7
3426 I had to run the gauntlet for the new website, fend off a secretarial beheading, and deal with angry interns who wanted to storm the battlements. How was your week?" 1.3043 0.04410 161 120 33 8
3427 I know I said I wanted a knight in shining armor, but now you’re just being sarcastic. 1.3043 0.04497 161 121 31 9
3428 Now I understand why your profile said 'squeaky clean'. 1.3043 0.04321 161 119 35 7
3429 Do you think they serve straws here? 1.3043 0.04582 161 122 29 10
3430 Therapy isn’t going like I thought 1.3043 0.04137 161 117 39 5
3431 Yes, I did notice that the table is round Randy. 1.3041 0.03972 194 144 41 9
3432 Sale at Forever 21 A.D.? 1.3041 0.04396 171 129 32 10
3433 So Hillary, you are thinking of running for political office again. 1.3041 0.04474 171 130 30 11
3434 Well at least I know you didn't take a Viagra before the date. 1.3041 0.04474 171 130 30 11
3435 It just seems like you're being a little defensive. 1.3041 0.04396 171 129 32 10
3436 Frankly, I was expecting someone with shinier armor! 1.3041 0.04317 171 128 34 9
3437 When your profile said "I'll be the Knight in Shining Armor" I was thinking it would be more figurative. 1.3041 0.04550 171 131 28 12
3438 My shrink says I'm too defensive. 1.3041 0.04474 171 130 30 11
3439 This isn't quite what I meant by 'a night on the town'. 1.3041 0.04664 148 111 29 8
3440 Your dating profile did say "knight in shining armor" 1.3039 0.04302 181 137 33 11
3441 My Mother said I should never date a man in Uniform. 1.3039 0.04006 181 133 41 7
3442 That is not what “one night stand” means. 1.3039 0.04230 181 136 35 10
3443 When I heard “date night” I had something else mind 1.3038 0.04279 158 116 36 6
3444 It was hard enough to valet the stallion 1.3038 0.04372 158 117 34 7
3445 I told you to wear your BLUE suit, Harold. 1.3038 0.04553 158 119 30 9
3446 So, this online dating service is called “Joust Lunch”? 1.3037 0.04011 191 142 40 9
3447 I'm working with my therapist to let go of my armor 1.3037 0.03871 191 140 44 7
3448 For a knight in shining armor, you're not much of a conversationalist. 1.3036 0.04201 168 124 37 7
3449 So.. do you joust on the 1st date? 1.3036 0.04368 168 126 33 9
3450 i am playing hard to get 1.3034 0.04202 178 133 36 9
3451 Lance, what’s up? You appear a bit guarded tonight. 1.3034 0.04202 178 133 36 9
3452 I just couldn't have my defenses up all the time, the way you do. 1.3034 0.04125 178 132 38 8
3453 To be honest, I've had better knights, and that suit could use a shine. 1.3032 0.04611 155 117 29 9
3454 Your profile said that you’re a “bit withdrawn.” 1.3032 0.04232 155 113 37 5
3455 You said you wanted a fun knight out, right? 1.3032 0.04701 155 118 27 10
3456 So how’s the refrigerator magnet business going? 1.3032 0.04519 155 116 31 8
3457 It has been a very good year , But there is a metalic taste... 1.3032 0.04232 155 113 37 5
3458 Before this goes anywhere I need to tell you something- I've been hurt a lot in the past. 1.3030 0.04249 165 122 36 7
3459 I'd raise a glass, but I hear you're a little rusty... 1.3030 0.04502 165 125 30 10
3460 I think we should start hating other people. 1.3030 0.04502 165 125 30 10
3461 So....you're from Vegas. 1.3030 0.04502 165 125 30 10
3462 So are you planning to spend the night in shining armour? 1.3030 0.04502 165 125 30 10
3463 This isn’t the Knight I thought I would have 1.3030 0.04583 165 126 28 11
3464 How do you plan to manage the straw ban? 1.3030 0.04502 165 125 30 10
3465 Yeah, I’m a night person too. 1.3030 0.03645 198 143 50 5
3466 Now I get why, when you called, you sounded like you were down in a sewer. 1.3030 0.04819 165 129 22 14
3467 When you promised me a night I would never forget, this wasn't what I expected. 1.3029 0.04474 175 134 29 12
3468 I just wanted a NIGHT out. 1.3029 0.04474 175 134 29 12
3469 You're taking MeToo too far. 1.3029 0.04400 175 133 31 11
3470 Trust me. You’re going to have a night to remember. 1.3029 0.04248 175 131 35 9
3471 You BETTER keep your trap shut. 1.3029 0.04400 175 133 31 11
3472 Maybe we should go back to just 'regular' date night. 1.3027 0.04371 185 142 30 13
3473 I'm a metallurgist. You can't fool me with that polished facade. 1.3027 0.04304 185 141 32 12
3474 Well, I'm somebody’s knight in shining armor. 1.3027 0.04094 185 138 38 9
3475 Just because it was made in 1050 doesn’t make it mid-century modern. 1.3026 0.04671 152 115 28 9
3476 Well this has been an interesting knight. 1.3026 0.04671 152 115 28 9
3477 I told you to bring your straw. 1.3026 0.04577 152 114 30 8
3478 Civilized and mysterious is a potent combo. 1.3026 0.04382 152 112 34 6
3479 Do you like the knight life? Do you bogie? 1.3025 0.04558 162 123 29 10
3480 You said to dress up for a night on the town, but I must have misunderstood. 1.3025 0.04116 162 118 39 5
3481 What do you mean 'This isn't what I had in mind'? You said you wanted a date knight. 1.3025 0.04641 162 124 27 11
3482 Sorry, but if you read my profile closely, it says that I'm looking for a night with shining amour. 1.3025 0.04473 162 122 31 9
3483 If you are, please stop looking at me like that. 1.3025 0.04473 162 122 31 9
3484 I think it is very presumptuous of you to think you needed to bring that kind of protection to our first date! 1.3025 0.04473 162 122 31 9
3485 I said in my profile that I didn’t want to date anyone who’s into heavy metal. 1.3025 0.04641 162 124 27 11
3486 I’m not quite sure why I ordered wine. 1.3025 0.04961 162 128 19 15
3487 What I really said was, "I'd enjoy a night out on the town." 1.3023 0.04374 172 130 32 10
3488 I detect a metallic flavor...do you, dear? 1.3023 0.04135 172 127 38 7
3489 The food was mediocre, the wine not that great, however this knight I'll long remember 1.3023 0.04216 172 128 36 8
3490 What if we'd gotten a square table?" 1.3023 0.04296 172 129 34 9
3491 Meeting my knight in shining armor isn't all it's cracked up to be. 1.3022 0.04210 182 137 35 10
3492 You are so guarded. I don’t know how to penetrate your armor. 1.3022 0.04281 182 138 33 11
3493 You really are serious about this role play thing aren't you 1.3022 0.04352 182 139 31 12
3494 I know your profile said a knight in shining armor, but... 1.3022 0.04966 139 106 24 9
3495 This isn't exactly what I meant by a night on the town 1.3020 0.04538 149 111 31 7
3496 Tilda had suspicions that this may be just another one night stand. 1.3020 0.04733 149 113 27 9
3497 It's a "figure of speech" in common use. Google it. 1.3019 0.04867 159 124 22 13
3498 You've Got Mail." Can we stop the charades now 1.3018 0.04426 169 128 31 10
3499 I only get wined and dined when you want to buy another new lance" 1.3018 0.04264 169 126 35 8
3500 You seem...what is it exactly? Defensive? 1.3018 0.04345 169 127 33 9
3501 I know you said you were my Knight in shining armor but I didn’t kmow you meant literally. 1.3018 0.04264 169 126 35 8
3502 When I posted that I was looking for my knight in shining armor, i meant it metaphorically. 1.3018 0.04264 169 126 35 8
3503 They say that red wine prevents rust. 1.3018 0.04180 169 125 37 7
3504 So the 'Ye Olde Dating Site' isn't really for mature adults as it turns out? 1.3018 0.04505 169 129 29 11
3505 Great Tinder fails 1.3017 0.04181 179 134 36 9
3506 I’m hoping to diversify into dragon-slaying 1.3017 0.04181 179 134 36 9
3507 Well my holy grail is another Merlot. 1.3017 0.04256 179 135 34 10
3508 I wanted a round table! 1.3017 0.04029 179 132 40 7
3509 Well...if you'll promise to charge down the aisle on a white horse I'll say, 'Yes!' 1.3017 0.04106 179 133 38 8
3510 The evening had gone well so far, and Kevin was increasingly hopeful about getting a good knight kiss. 1.3016 0.04304 189 145 31 13
3511 This was not the knight I was promised. 1.3015 0.03899 199 148 42 9
3512 Let's drink to a good knight. 1.3014 0.04493 146 108 32 6
3513 Did you ride in on a white Uber? 1.3013 0.04585 156 118 29 9
3514 Most women can still recognize you in disguise, Brett,- with or without displaying your trump card! 1.3013 0.04933 156 122 21 13
3515 And it's not exactly shining now is it? 1.3013 0.04110 156 113 39 4
3516 So you like to joust. 1.3012 0.04479 166 126 30 10
3517 This is a 5 star restaurant. You could of least wore something different than your work clothes. 1.3012 0.04396 166 125 32 9
3518 You said you wanted a blind date with a knight in shining armor. 1.3012 0.04479 166 126 30 10
3519 I thought you were going to take the knight off.... 1.3012 0.04559 166 127 28 11
3520 No I didn't bring a can opener. 1.3011 0.03990 176 129 41 6
3521 Your online profile did say you were looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.3011 0.04378 176 134 31 11
3522 No. Awkward is when you fail to save the princess. 1.3011 0.04303 176 133 33 10
3523 I bet you never had a knight out like this one. 1.3011 0.04417 186 144 28 14
3524 Why is this night different from all our other nights? 1.3011 0.04146 186 140 36 10
3525 Is the part where you try to convince me that chivalry isn’t dead or you believe in safe sex? 1.3011 0.04215 186 141 34 11
3526 My therapist said we needed a date knight. 1.3011 0.03930 186 137 42 7
3527 What I asked for was one night out. 1.3010 0.04256 196 151 31 14
3528 Everyone is so unbearably literal. 1.3007 0.04552 143 106 31 6
3529 You aren't as shiny as your profile pic 1.3007 0.04865 143 109 25 9
3530 'Well, you're right, my profile DID state that I love the night life.' 1.3007 0.04358 153 113 34 6
3531 I feel that you don’t fully respect my vulnerability. 1.3007 0.04645 153 116 28 9
3532 I'm guarded. 1.3006 0.04276 163 121 35 7
3533 No kidding. Myself, I identify as a day person. 1.3006 0.04363 163 122 33 8
3534 I can see why your new diet is working so well. 1.3006 0.03905 163 117 43 3
3535 I thought you said Wine Knight. 1.3006 0.04449 163 123 31 9
3536 It’s my emotional armor 1.3006 0.04533 163 124 29 10
3537 Sorry Ellen, my first date skills are a little rusty. 1.3006 0.04352 173 131 32 10
3538 Oh, yes it’s lady’s Knight 1.3006 0.04275 173 130 34 9
3539 Your armor was shining more in your profile pic. 1.3006 0.04275 173 130 34 9
3540 I'm no Guinevere, but you're no Lancelot, either. 1.3006 0.04114 173 128 38 7
3541 Oh really? Yale Law? 1.3006 0.04352 173 131 32 10
3542 I promised you a knight to remember 1.3000 0.04481 170 130 29 11
3543 My profile did say that I was a knight person. 1.3000 0.04323 170 128 33 9
3544 This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I said I was looking forward to a night out. 1.3000 0.04481 170 130 29 11
3545 I am not having a middle-age crisis. 1.3000 0.04610 150 113 29 8
3546 Why didn't you tell me it's jacket and tie? 1.3000 0.04234 160 118 36 6
3547 The check is in the maille! 1.3000 0.04159 170 126 37 7
3548 I'm gonna work the knight shift after this. 1.3000 0.04481 170 130 29 11
3549 I didn't literally mean knight in shining armor 1.3000 0.04403 170 129 31 10
3550 I'm sure this will be a knight to remember. 1.3000 0.04323 170 128 33 9
3551 I'm sorry, this isn't the night I was expecting. 1.3000 0.04403 170 129 31 10
3552 I don't lance a lot on the first date . . .these days you've got to be careful . . .. 1.3000 0.04558 170 131 27 12
3553 I'll need to see your lance first. 1.3000 0.04706 150 114 27 9
3554 Does this wine taste metallic to you too darling? 1.3000 0.03874 190 140 43 7
3555 It’s a clever disguise, Brett. 1.3000 0.04610 150 113 29 8
3556 You looked different in the chain mail order catalog. 1.2995 0.04127 187 141 36 10
3557 I hope you got it on sale. 1.2994 0.04130 177 132 37 8
3558 I was expecting a "night" out 1.2994 0.04357 177 135 31 11
3559 I'll have my usual, consommé and a straw. 1.2994 0.04207 177 133 35 9
3560 This plastic straw ban has certainly put a crimp in my social life. 1.2994 0.04502 177 137 27 13
3561 I have to admit, I truly thought you Photoshopped your profile picture. 1.2994 0.04290 167 125 34 8
3562 And the extra virgin olive oil is great for the hinge joints. 1.2994 0.04374 167 126 32 9
3563 If you wanted mead you should’ve said so. 1.2994 0.04119 167 123 38 6
3564 I’m really glad you stayed for the Knight. 1.2994 0.04206 167 124 36 7
3565 Oh, you meant that kind of nightclub. 1.2994 0.04206 167 124 36 7
3566 This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I said, I wanted to take a night out. 1.2994 0.04455 167 127 30 10
3567 Charles, stop complaining, I'm tired of cleaning the wine spills off your clothes! 1.2994 0.04614 167 129 26 12
3568 My therapist described you as “well defended” 1.2994 0.04455 167 127 30 10
3569 I understand you were hurt from your last relationship,but this seems like a bit much. 1.2994 0.04560 157 119 29 9
3570 How was date knight? 1.2994 0.04470 157 118 31 8
3571 And I thought I was too old for online dating. 1.2994 0.04283 157 116 35 6
3572 You were less rusty in your profile picture. 1.2994 0.04560 157 119 29 9
3573 I get the armor part. Shining? Not so much. 1.2993 0.04770 147 112 26 9
3574 This is not exactly what I had in mind when I said "date night." 1.2993 0.04570 147 110 30 7
3575 You check off a lot of boxes but I'm still gonna need to run a background check. 1.2993 0.04900 137 104 25 8
3576 When I said you needed more iron... 1.2990 0.04219 194 149 32 13
3577 Why yes, my favorite movie is The Dark Knight. Why do you ask? 1.2989 0.03875 184 135 43 6
3578 is that Machine Oil No. 9? 1.2989 0.04025 184 137 39 8
3579 I'm out of prophylactics. 1.2989 0.04253 174 131 34 9
3580 you don,t look anything like your picture. 1.2989 0.04407 174 133 30 11
3581 You seem to like this round table. 1.2989 0.04175 174 130 36 8
3582 I was kind of thinking of psychological armor. 1.2989 0.04094 174 129 38 7
3583 So what do you hear from Attila? 1.2989 0.04331 174 132 32 10
3584 I can't be your damsel in distress. 1.2988 0.04164 164 121 37 6
3585 So according to your Tinder, you're a 'Medieval Enthusiast'? 1.2988 0.04426 164 124 31 9
3586 You told me come protected tonight. 1.2988 0.04253 164 122 35 7
3587 So is this what young people refer to as knight-life? 1.2988 0.04164 164 121 37 6
3588 What makes you say I must have been burned before by dating apps? 1.2988 0.03981 164 119 41 4
3589 You may be a knight in shining armor, but your conversation's a little rusty. 1.2988 0.04340 164 123 33 8
3590 Did you listen to my voicemail or did you just read your phone’s transcription? 1.2988 0.04426 164 124 31 9
3591 Any hobbies other than jousting? 1.2988 0.04340 164 123 33 8
3592 So was I an accidental right swipe? 1.2988 0.04164 164 121 37 6
3593 Will you be able to get on your horse after we’re done here? 1.2988 0.04426 164 124 31 9
3594 That genie thinks he's soooo clever. 1.2988 0.04509 164 125 29 10
3595 You thought it said It’s Joust Lunch? 1.2988 0.04592 164 126 27 11
3596 What kind of student loan do you get for knight school? 1.2988 0.04340 164 123 33 8
3597 This is not what I meant when I said "I wanted to have a nice night" 1.2988 0.04752 164 128 23 13
3598 To be honest, this really isn't the knight for this. 1.2987 0.04431 154 115 32 7
3599 I'll cut you some slack since this is our first date, but please stop calling me Guinevere. 1.2987 0.04334 154 114 34 6
3600 If you need to use the little squires' room you should just go. 1.2987 0.04526 154 116 30 8
3601 What makes you say I can't relax? 1.2987 0.04334 154 114 34 6
3602 So, uh... I know people normally ask each other to go on a date, but I was wondering if you wanted to start a crusade? You know... Deus vult and all. 1.2986 0.04525 144 107 31 6
3603 This has been a great knight out, but I have to go. 1.2986 0.04416 144 106 33 5
3604 Yes, it is a round table. Very round. 1.2986 0.04836 144 110 25 9
3605 I like what you did with the ruffle 1.2984 0.04066 191 144 37 10
3606 Damn, I forgot they no longer have straws here. 1.2984 0.04133 191 145 35 11
3607 When you said knight in shining armor on your profile, you weren’t kidding. 1.2983 0.04215 181 137 34 10
3608 Notes of apricot, a taste of tamarind and a touch of cold steel. 1.2982 0.04221 171 128 35 8
3609 I was hoping for more of a left-leaning knight in shining armor. 1.2982 0.04381 171 130 31 10
3610 This could set speed dating back500 years 1.2982 0.04459 171 131 29 11
3611 What else did you hear about me? 1.2982 0.04459 171 131 29 11
3612 Well then, what would a risk taking actuary wear to bed? 1.2982 0.03969 171 125 41 5
3613 Can we save the role play for later please? 1.2982 0.04381 171 130 31 10
3614 On our first date you seemed a bit guarded but this is taking things to a whole new level. 1.2981 0.04479 161 122 30 9
3615 It's LGBQTIA neutral and SPF 9000 1.2981 0.04479 161 122 30 9
3616 Yes I did say in my profile that I appreciate chivalry but... 1.2981 0.04303 161 120 34 7
3617 So you're saying that chivalry isn't dead? 1.2981 0.04118 161 118 38 5
3618 It all seems so long ago...the lake...sword.... 1.2981 0.04650 161 124 26 11
3619 On second thought, the burka looked better. 1.2981 0.04392 161 121 32 8
3620 I know it's going to be difficult but a straw will ruin your image! 1.2980 0.04584 151 114 29 8
3621 You better get some steel wool if you want to use that line. 1.2980 0.04387 151 112 33 6
3622 That wine is just going to sit there until you let your defenses down 1.2979 0.03669 188 136 48 4
3623 Does this wine hav a metallic taste ? 1.2979 0.04905 141 108 24 9
3624 Chivalry is dead--so we're splitting the check. 1.2979 0.04694 141 106 28 7
3625 Drat! I thought your internet posting said you were LIKE a knight in shining armor. 1.2978 0.03952 178 131 41 6
3626 What a knight to remember 1.2978 0.04335 178 136 31 11
3627 This is why I never accept blind dates. 1.2978 0.04479 178 138 27 13
3628 Actually Sheryl, I'm not a huge fan of Game of Thrones. It's too violent for me. 1.2978 0.04186 178 134 35 9
3629 I’m really quite shy underneath all this armor. 1.2978 0.04186 178 134 35 9
3630 But you must admit that 'eat incognito' and 'eat a burrito' sound a lot alike. 1.2978 0.04262 178 135 33 10
3631 Has the #MeToo movement affected you much? 1.2976 0.04432 168 128 30 10
3632 I'm sure you are a nice person, but as a Knight in Shining Armor, I was expecting a Princess. 1.2976 0.04351 168 127 32 9
3633 Yeah my profile said so, but knight in shining armor was a metaphor. 1.2976 0.04432 168 128 30 10
3634 Your armor looked shinier online. 1.2976 0.04184 168 125 36 7
3635 Hurt before? Why m'lady, what makes you say that? 1.2976 0.04098 168 124 38 6
3636 This is not the night out I had in mind. 1.2976 0.04512 168 129 28 11
3637 Now you claim it was a typo, but your posting for someone in their Middle Ages was perfectly clear on the match.com website! 1.2975 0.04535 158 120 29 9
3638 You know you can open up with me. 1.2975 0.04623 158 121 27 10
3639 Is outrageous what a Republican has to do these days to eat peacefully. 1.2975 0.04354 158 118 33 7
3640 Wine me. Dine me. But if you try to joust me, I'm calling HR 1.2975 0.04260 158 117 35 6
3641 This armor's nothing. You should see my chastity belt. 1.2975 0.04623 158 121 27 10
3642 So that's what you meant by "a Renaissance Man" in your profile! 1.2974 0.03941 195 146 40 9
3643 Thanks. I really needed a girl's knight out. 1.2973 0.04079 185 139 37 9
3644 I've never been on a half blind date, either. 1.2973 0.03933 185 137 41 7
3645 I thought I wanted a knight in shining armor, but... 1.2973 0.04544 148 111 30 7
3646 When you suggested a nightcap, this isn’t what I had in mind. 1.2971 0.04385 175 134 30 11
3647 Rapunzel couldn't make it. She's washing her hair. 1.2971 0.04233 175 132 34 9
3648 Why didn't you mention this on the dating site? 1.2971 0.04532 175 136 26 13
3649 Well, this wasn’t what I thought you meant by a knight out. 1.2971 0.04385 175 134 30 11
3650 Yes, I do have a magnetic personality. Please pass the straws. 1.2971 0.04154 175 131 36 8
3651 my therapist says I'm really guarded too... 1.2971 0.03910 175 128 42 5
3652 I agree, definitely oak and black cherry, but a bit metallic, don't you think? 1.2971 0.04233 175 132 34 9
3653 I'm going to need a can opener to get into his pants. 1.2971 0.04459 175 135 28 12
3654 I mean, I’ve heard of being chaste, but don’t you think this is a little much? 1.2971 0.03910 175 128 42 5
3655 Roleplaying was your idea. If you don't want to be a damsel, how about a dragon? 1.2970 0.04053 165 121 39 5
3656 Well, your profile did indicate that you were looking for a Renaissance Man. 1.2970 0.04403 165 125 31 9
3657 So, when you said you wanted to be my 'knight in shining armor' you meant it literally. 1.2970 0.04318 165 124 33 8
3658 Do you think the auto body shop will be able to get you out of that thing before our bridge game on Saturday? " 1.2970 0.04567 165 127 27 11
3659 "...And you had to order the lobster." 1.2970 0.04403 165 125 31 9
3660 When the counselor talked about being vulnerable and letting your guard down, you obviously weren’t listening. 1.2970 0.04318 165 124 33 8
3661 I find it's best to let your guard down on first dates. 1.2969 0.03840 192 142 43 7
3662 perhaps a straw might help 1.2968 0.04501 155 117 30 8
3663 Actually, Carol, I do understand. After Kavanaugh, we all feel a greater need to protect ourselves in public. 1.2968 0.04772 155 120 24 11
3664 I thought your profile said you "went" to Duke. 1.2968 0.04212 155 114 36 5
3665 I don't think it is overly critical of me to suggest that your armor isn't shining. 1.2968 0.04593 155 118 28 9
3666 I said “a night out,” but obviously I should have spelled “night.” 1.2968 0.04501 155 117 30 8
3667 You read my mind, Harold, but it's what's under the armor I was dreaming about. 1.2967 0.04048 182 136 38 8
3668 Oh. You thought my last name was Knight. 1.2967 0.03816 182 133 44 5
3669 You're very literal, aren't you? 1.2967 0.04267 182 139 32 11
3670 It's just been issued for senators--it is the only we can eat safely in public these days. 1.2967 0.04122 182 137 36 9
3671 What do you mean "Chivalry is dead"? 1.2967 0.03972 182 135 40 7
3672 As you know I've dropped the restraining order. 1.2966 0.04280 145 106 35 4
3673 I feel like I can truly let my guard down with you. 1.2965 0.04359 172 131 31 10
3674 Let's get one thing straight. I do not intend to end up as a "Knight's Tale" 1.2965 0.04587 172 134 25 13
3675 Yes, I did say that in my profile but I didn't mean it literally. 1.2965 0.04512 172 133 27 12
3676 Is this what you call taking a knight out? 1.2965 0.04035 172 127 39 6
3677 Chivalry is not dead 1.2965 0.04118 172 128 37 7
3678 The posting did say that I would be your knight in shining armor. 1.2965 0.04280 172 130 33 9
3679 You say you’re proud of being the first female knight and that’s why you always wear your armor when we go out, but I think you’re embarrassed by me and our relationship. 1.2965 0.04015 199 151 37 11
3680 I like beer. 1.2963 0.03877 189 140 42 7
3681 A Knight Out 1.2963 0.04097 162 119 38 5
3682 This is our first date and I think its rude to ask me if I am wearing a chastity belt. 1.2963 0.04541 162 124 28 10
3683 Yes, this is a round table, but I refuse to call you King Arthur. 1.2963 0.04456 162 123 30 9
3684 You know the old saying? Once a King always a King... But once a Knight is enough! 1.2963 0.04624 162 125 26 11
3685 You said that you were taking me to a night club! 1.2963 0.04456 162 123 30 9
3686 you don't look anything like your profile picture. 1.2961 0.04596 179 141 23 15
3687 I liked our 7th, when you came as a carpet. 1.2961 0.04090 179 134 37 8
3688 Get it?! I'm a knight...at a round table... 1.2961 0.03934 179 132 41 6
3689 No, I will not get you a straw. 1.2961 0.04241 179 136 33 10
3690 Seems a tad metallic on the finish. 1.2961 0.04090 179 134 37 8
3691 Ok Mr kavanaugh. We're in session. Today we'll try a little bit of wine. But remember, No still means No. If you do well today, we can have the next session without the safety outfit. 1.2961 0.05013 152 120 19 13
3692 Let's agree to disagree about the straw ban. 1.2961 0.05013 152 120 19 13
3693 Heavy metal is a problem. 1.2961 0.04461 152 114 31 7
3694 Once a knight is enough! 1.2961 0.04652 152 116 27 9
3695 Your armor looked a lot shinier on the app. 1.2961 0.04362 152 113 33 6
3696 Why are you so defensive tonight? 1.2959 0.04329 169 128 32 9
3697 Don’t tell Rapunzel 1.2959 0.04410 169 129 30 10
3698 Have you heard the one about when the cliche meets the metaphor? 1.2959 0.04489 169 130 28 11
3699 You say it's haute couture. I say it's morbid paranoia. 1.2959 0.04410 169 129 30 10
3700 Good knight, sweetheart. It's time to go. 1.2959 0.03990 169 124 40 5
3701 I thought the wine would loosen you up. 1.2959 0.04163 169 126 36 7
3702 I wish you'd just finally let your guard down. 1.2959 0.04163 169 126 36 7
3703 I've heard about you men of steel. 1.2959 0.04078 169 125 38 6
3704 Acne. 1.2959 0.04410 169 129 30 10
3705 Interests?...Sous vide cooking...um...Italian contemporary art...um...Oh, and jousting. I love jousting! 1.2959 0.04247 169 127 34 8
3706 I like my wine red, like the blood of my enemies. 1.2958 0.04875 142 109 24 9
3707 Waiter, one straw please 1.2958 0.04332 142 104 34 4
3708 You look younger in your profile pic. 1.2958 0.04665 142 107 28 7
3709 I’ll order a can opener so you can drink your wine. 1.2957 0.04132 186 141 35 10
3710 This is not what I had in mind when I said I wanted a romantic night. 1.2957 0.04061 186 140 37 9
3711 So how long have you been using the Damsel app? 1.2957 0.04201 186 142 33 11
3712 Should we ask the waiter to bring you a straw? 1.2957 0.03988 186 139 39 8
3713 This is my first night cap with a capped knight, however, I once did a night caper with a caped knight. 1.2957 0.03988 186 139 39 8
3714 Why? Well, to be honest, because my therapist said I need to do a better job protecting my boundaries. 1.2956 0.04142 159 117 37 5
3715 I should have thought this all the way through. 1.2956 0.04421 159 120 31 8
3716 What epidemic did you say it was? 1.2956 0.03945 159 115 41 3
3717 Would it help if I pledged my troth? 1.2956 0.04510 159 121 29 9
3718 You don't look like your Facebook profile. 1.2956 0.04421 159 120 31 8
3719 Well, I'm joust about ready to call it a knight. 1.2956 0.04510 159 121 29 9
3720 I think you need more than a straw. 1.2956 0.04598 159 122 27 10
3721 Your secret's safe with me, Justice. 1.2956 0.04684 159 123 25 11
3722 This must be why my daughter says it’s safer to just swipe left. 1.2955 0.03974 176 130 40 6
3723 You’re such a great listener. 1.2955 0.04134 176 132 36 8
3724 That's nothing. I used to date Oedipus. 1.2955 0.04288 176 134 32 10
3725 It's nice to know that chivalry isn't dead. 1.2955 0.04363 176 135 30 11
3726 Why so defensive? All I asked was are you having an affair. 1.2955 0.04134 176 132 36 8
3727 Yes Steven, this role play makes me uncomfortable... 1.2955 0.04212 176 133 34 9
3728 How long have you been working the Knight shift? 1.2953 0.03962 193 145 39 9
3729 To me it has something of a metallic taste. 1.2953 0.04096 193 147 35 11
3730 Botox didn't work out for you? 1.2953 0.03962 193 145 39 9
3731 Honey...I think you are being overly defensive. 1.2953 0.04029 193 146 37 10
3732 I know I can be picky, but your armor could be a tiny bit shinier. 1.2953 0.04206 149 109 36 4
3733 My therapist is right. It’s time to develop more realistic expectations about my relationships. 1.2952 0.04462 166 127 29 10
3734 Is it your first time at the Olive Garden? 1.2952 0.04380 166 126 31 9
3735 This is not what I meant when I said I wanted a “date night.” 1.2952 0.04380 166 126 31 9
3736 Sure you wouldn't like a straw? 1.2952 0.04032 166 122 39 5
3737 It's just a conversation about our future. 1.2952 0.04380 166 126 31 9
3738 You did say 'seeking knight in shining armor' Ma'am. 1.2952 0.04295 166 125 33 8
3739 I’ve told you a million times, Harry. You can’t expect a valet driver to know how to park a steed. 1.2952 0.04543 166 128 27 11
3740 For heaven's sakes, Jeanette, it's time to come out! 1.2952 0.04462 166 127 29 10
3741 It was just a messy breakup; my ex really threw down the gauntlet. 1.2952 0.04462 166 127 29 10
3742 Took you a while to get into speed dating? 1.2952 0.04122 166 123 37 6
3743 It’s no harder than snaps on a bra...I’ll show you how if you’ll show me. 1.2952 0.04210 166 124 35 7
3744 You will have to lift it enentually. 1.2952 0.04380 166 126 31 9
3745 Yes, I know, everyone thinks it is a sexual harassment thing, but really, I just like the feel of metal against my skin. 1.2952 0.04295 166 125 33 8
3746 I’m afraid you’re going to have to raise your visor. Plastic straws have been banned. 1.2951 0.04386 183 142 28 13
3747 Okay Sir Lancelot, let's see how you drink that wine! 1.2951 0.04029 183 137 38 8
3748 Want a straw? 1.2951 0.04175 183 139 34 10
3749 It’s not working John. You’re always ready for a fight then you shut me out 1.2951 0.04175 183 139 34 10
3750 You wanted to have a talk? 1.2951 0.03954 183 136 40 7
3751 But your profile said you were looking for me. 1.2951 0.04103 183 138 36 9
3752 I take it this is part of your 'me too' prevention plan. 1.2950 0.04945 139 107 23 9
3753 Please, 'Sir' is my father's name. Cal me Aeduuin. 1.2949 0.04476 156 118 30 8
3754 All I wanted was a really good night. 1.2949 0.04657 156 120 26 10
3755 Yes, I did wish for my very own knight in shining armor, but that was only figurative. 1.2949 0.04287 156 116 34 6
3756 whats your problem? Didn't you say you wanted a romantic knight out.. 1.2948 0.04259 173 131 33 9
3757 So, on our anniversary, you have to brag that you still fit into your wedding armor? 1.2948 0.04337 173 132 31 10
3758 So this is what you use for protection? 1.2948 0.03930 173 127 41 5
3759 My dating profile said, “I’m attracted to mid-level manager types. Not Midevel.” But you do get points for the suit. 1.2948 0.03930 173 127 41 5
3760 I’m sorry, Mr. Vice-President, this is ridiculous! 1.2948 0.04337 173 132 31 10
3761 You looked different on your Tinder picture 1.2948 0.04636 173 136 23 14
3762 Where did you park your horse? 1.2948 0.04179 173 130 35 8
3763 So far, so good. Now, what do you do for a living 1.2948 0.04015 173 128 39 6
3764 So, if I understand you correctly, senator, making America great again involves you getting medieval on my ass? 1.2945 0.04876 146 113 23 10
3765 For a third date, this might be a step backward. 1.2945 0.04576 146 110 29 7
3766 To be fair, my personal ad did say, "Are you ready for a knight on the town?" 1.2945 0.04778 146 112 25 9
3767 Not exactly what I expected when you suggested a night out. 1.2945 0.04600 163 126 26 11
3768 I'm still not clear about how to survive these Dark Ages. 1.2945 0.04432 163 124 30 9
3769 Yeah, sure, I've kept my landline...what exactly are you getting at? 1.2945 0.04681 163 127 24 12
3770 Dating in the "me too" era is a lot different 1.2945 0.04517 163 125 28 10
3771 I guess tonight is the Knight. 1.2945 0.04168 163 121 36 6
3772 So, you've had a few #MeToo Accusers? 1.2945 0.04346 163 123 32 8
3773 I thought you said you wanted a good Knight 1.2945 0.04168 163 121 36 6
3774 Oh, I misunderstood...VERBAL jousting 1.2944 0.04146 180 136 35 9
3775 I think that's enough about Arthur for one night, hon. 1.2944 0.04071 180 135 37 8
3776 Gladys has second thoughts about her "night to remember". 1.2941 0.04057 170 126 38 6
3777 Sorry to hear plastic straws are outlawed here. 1.2941 0.04718 153 118 25 10
3778 I guess you haven't heard about the straw ban? 1.2941 0.04387 170 130 30 10
3779 May I give you a Good Knight Kiss? 1.2941 0.04225 170 128 34 8
3780 Let's not get physical. 1.2941 0.04307 170 129 32 9
3781 Aside from killing dragons and rescuing damsels, I mean. 1.2941 0.03882 170 124 42 4
3782 Dang! When I finally do get to meet a knight in shining armor, he is still wearing it! 1.2941 0.04307 170 129 32 9
3783 I thought the "knight in shining armor" line in your profile was just an attempt to convey your character traits. 1.2941 0.04135 153 112 37 4
3784 Doris had something else in mind when she asked her husband for a night on the town. 1.2941 0.04142 170 127 36 7
3785 I'll have the waiter bring you a straw. 1.2941 0.04042 187 141 37 9
3786 I find that it enhances the experience of drinking a spectacular 15th Century wine. 1.2941 0.04532 153 116 29 8
3787 We can go to Medieval Times for your birthday. This is my night. 1.2941 0.04626 153 117 27 9
3788 Here, this will help you to open up 1.2938 0.03944 194 146 39 9
3789 If my pet dragon doesn't like you, it probably won't work out. 1.2938 0.03944 194 146 39 9
3790 You don't have to be worried about tonight, I don't go out without protection. 1.2938 0.04191 177 134 34 9
3791 I didn’t hear the “k” 1.2938 0.04267 177 135 32 10
3792 We don't run in the same social stratum, not even in the same historical period. 1.2938 0.04191 177 134 34 9
3793 Midlife crisis, I thought it was medieval crisis! 1.2937 0.04307 160 120 33 7
3794 I ordered a straw. Where's my straw? 1.2937 0.04573 160 123 27 10
3795 Still in your nighties I see.. 1.2937 0.04486 160 122 29 9
3796 Your last name is Day? Huh. What are the chances? 1.2937 0.04397 160 121 31 8
3797 I wish you were more clear about Date Knight—I would have never hired a sitter. 1.2937 0.04215 160 119 35 6
3798 You look a lot different in your profile pictures Janice 1.2937 0.04486 160 122 29 9
3799 Well, your profile did say you'd be chivalrous... 1.2937 0.04121 160 118 37 5
3800 I think we need to work through some trust issues. 1.2935 0.03788 201 150 43 8
3801 Besides that, your armor isn't shining. 1.2935 0.03702 184 134 46 4
3802 I'm a social justice warrior. 1.2935 0.04296 184 142 30 12
3803 Oh, I wasn’t in costume at the Renaissance Fair. 1.2934 0.04101 167 124 37 6
3804 So, how was Burning Man this year? 1.2934 0.04188 167 125 35 7
3805 Suzie, stop. You're letting the Kavanaugh thing get to you. 1.2934 0.04676 167 131 23 13
3806 I think I'll just call an Uber, I can't do horses. 1.2934 0.04101 167 124 37 6
3807 I'm working on coming out of my shell. You? 1.2934 0.04273 167 126 33 8
3808 Brett, I know it's but a rough week, but is the suit really necessary? 1.2933 0.04687 150 115 26 9
3809 You looked different in your profile photo 1.2933 0.04492 150 113 30 7
3810 Well, yes, this is a bit of a surprise. I was expecting Robin Hood. 1.2933 0.04182 150 110 36 4
3811 Yes, it IS a very scary time for young men, Sir Bone Spurs. 1.2933 0.04687 150 115 26 9
3812 I didn’t know that dating in the Middle Ages would be so tough. 1.2931 0.04466 174 135 27 12
3813 When you offered to be my knight in shining armor, I thought you meant something else. 1.2931 0.04158 174 131 35 8
3814 Just thick skin won't do to survive my family's Thanksgiving dinner... 1.2931 0.03995 174 129 39 6
3815 I was expecting a bit more shine. And a horse. 1.2931 0.04315 174 133 31 10
3816 You’re right. It does seem more like Camelot this way. 1.2931 0.04237 174 132 33 9
3817 Have you thought of getting contacts? 1.2931 0.04613 174 137 23 14
3818 ...and on weekends I’m part of The Hundred Years’ War Reenactment Society. 1.2930 0.04542 157 120 28 9
3819 Well, my profile does say I love the nightlife. 1.2930 0.04542 157 120 28 9
3820 I don’t understand why you’re always so guarded. 1.2929 0.03545 198 144 50 4
3821 Winston, you'll always be my knight in shining armor. 1.2928 0.04273 181 139 31 11
3822 Yeah, I work the knight shift. 1.2928 0.03975 181 135 39 7
3823 Oh, I get it...a "Knight Cap". 1.2928 0.04052 181 136 37 8
3824 "Blind dates are usually so awkward. I guess I don't have to ask how you feel about 'protection'?" 1.2928 0.03736 181 132 45 4
3825 You have to ask for a straw. 1.2927 0.04323 164 124 32 8
3826 I know your dating profile says "Your knight in shining armour" but... 1.2927 0.04055 164 121 38 5
3827 You’re sure you wouldn’t be more comfortable at a round table? 1.2927 0.04408 164 125 30 9
3828 Your profile said you liked date nights. 1.2927 0.04235 164 123 34 7
3829 I know, I know, I don't look anything like my profile picture. 1.2927 0.04146 164 122 36 6
3830 I think I'll ask for a straw. 1.2927 0.04235 164 123 34 7
3831 Do you find first dates a little clunky? 1.2927 0.04146 164 122 36 6
3832 Your footsie game is, quite simply, too loud. 1.2927 0.04235 164 123 34 7
3833 Well, it isn’t as shiny as in your profile picture. 1.2927 0.04408 164 125 30 9
3834 It’s a very scary time for young men in America. . . . This is a very difficult time 1.2926 0.04093 188 143 35 10
3835 Pence is my hero 1.2926 0.04162 188 144 33 11
3836 I couldn’t remember if you said formal or not. 1.2926 0.03952 188 141 39 8
3837 Swipe knight. 1.2926 0.04162 188 144 33 11
3838 I've had some rough 1st dates, so I am a bit defensive. 1.2925 0.04446 147 110 31 6
3839 A bit too metallic, if you ask me. 1.2925 0.04446 147 110 31 6
3840 I detect strong notes of sweat and rust. 1.2925 0.04549 147 111 29 7
3841 Drink it. It's rust proof. 1.2924 0.04121 171 128 36 7
3842 Is this going to be a knight to remember? 1.2924 0.04121 171 128 36 7
3843 I knew I should have been more specific when I told Cathy to set me up with a "chivalrous man." 1.2924 0.03951 171 126 40 5
3844 I hate blind dates! 1.2924 0.04204 171 129 34 8
3845 My knight in shining armor wouldn't need a straw. 1.2924 0.04204 171 129 34 8
3846 Shining or not, you still have trouble letting people in. 1.2922 0.04314 154 115 33 6
3847 Im waiting for a straw. 1.2922 0.04781 154 120 23 11
3848 I am glad you're conquering your fear of the public. 1.2922 0.04314 154 115 33 6
3849 Is it red or white with roasted wart hog? 1.2922 0.04600 154 118 27 9
3850 No, I do not want spend the evening arguing but you've been on the defensive since I walked in. 1.2922 0.04600 154 118 27 9
3851 Touché 1.2921 0.04016 178 133 38 7
3852 Yes that was on my profile. But, do you know what figurative means? 1.2921 0.04094 178 134 36 8
3853 Your bio specified "shining." 1.2921 0.04094 178 134 36 8
3854 You thought I was kidding about being a knight in shining armor. 1.2920 0.04652 137 103 28 6
3855 Do you need a straw? I don’t think they have those anymore. 1.2919 0.04099 161 119 37 5
3856 Darn this straw ban. 1.2919 0.04632 161 125 25 11
3857 You look different than your Match picture. 1.2919 0.04193 161 120 35 6
3858 We'll save a few bucks; the radio said, "Lady's knight drinks are free." 1.2919 0.04065 185 140 36 9
3859 That’s the last time I swipe ‘Knight’ on Tinder. 1.2919 0.03992 185 139 38 8
3860 So this is a blind date? 1.2919 0.04065 185 140 36 9
3861 So, you guys don’t have ‘Casual Fridays’? 1.2919 0.03842 185 137 42 6
3862 My ex said I was "too closed off." Do I seem that way to you? 1.2919 0.03917 185 138 40 7
3863 I hope you don’t mind my saying, but you seem a little older in person. 1.2917 0.03902 168 123 41 4
3864 I know he said ‘it’s a very scary time for young men in America’, but really! 1.2917 0.04334 168 128 31 9
3865 As a straight, white male, I feel like I need to protect myself in these trying times. 1.2917 0.04167 192 148 32 12
3866 I could’ve sworn I swiped left... 1.2915 0.03807 199 149 42 8
3867 When I agreed to a blind date I thought 'knight in shining armor' was just an expression. 1.2914 0.04138 175 132 35 8
3868 I've never dated a Lance before. 1.2914 0.04058 175 131 37 7
3869 When your post described yourself as a knight in shining armor I guess you really meant it. 1.2914 0.04294 175 134 31 10
3870 Yes, you’ve mentioned that it tastes metallic. 1.2914 0.04370 175 135 29 11
3871 So Joyce, have you seen a decrease in those unwanted advances? 1.2914 0.04753 151 117 24 10
3872 I think it’s because you are always so, so defensive. 1.2914 0.04264 151 112 34 5
3873 I feel like you have a guard up. 1.2912 0.03800 182 134 43 5
3874 Apparently chivalry isn't dead 1.2912 0.04180 182 139 33 10
3875 I’m not a maiden in distress but you’re giving me second thoughts. 1.2912 0.04107 182 138 35 9
3876 Look me in the eye and tell me that you will stop fighting. 1.2912 0.04032 182 137 37 8
3877 You do know that when I asked for a night out, this isn't what I meant. 1.2911 0.04517 158 121 28 9
3878 On Eharmony all you said was that you used to work for Under Armour. 1.2911 0.04427 158 120 30 8
3879 I love what you did to your hair. 1.2910 0.04277 189 147 29 13
3880 You said you wanted a knight out on the town. 1.2910 0.04143 189 145 33 11
3881 Are you letting your guard down again? 1.2910 0.03788 189 140 43 6
3882 Yeah, yeah, you're a regular knight in shining armor. 1.2909 0.04385 165 126 30 9
3883 I've been pulling an all knighter. 1.2909 0.04710 165 130 22 13
3884 I prefer days over knights. 1.2909 0.04469 165 127 28 10
3885 When I asked for a night at the round table this is not what I expected! 1.2909 0.04469 165 127 28 10
3886 Do you think this sweater makes me look middle-aged? 1.2909 0.04213 165 124 34 7
3887 You demanded vintage. 1.2909 0.04034 165 122 38 5
3888 Let's not make this whole evening about the Black Knight, again. Please? 1.2909 0.04300 165 125 32 8
3889 This wine has a metallic taste to it. 1.2909 0.04385 165 126 30 9
3890 The answer is still, " No"! 1.2909 0.04469 165 127 28 10
3891 I hope they serve the dragon filet medium. 1.2908 0.04779 141 108 25 8
3892 I never wear a sword on the first date. I don’t like to be too showy. 1.2908 0.04779 141 108 25 8
3893 Oh, you meant date NIGHT? 1.2907 0.04017 172 128 38 6
3894 And that’s how I got my MBA 1.2907 0.04420 172 133 28 11
3895 Not a knight dear, I have a headache 1.2907 0.04343 172 132 30 10
3896 So, as a knight errant, do you tend to travel a lot for work? 1.2907 0.04017 172 128 38 6
3897 This wine has aged well in the last 600 years! 1.2907 0.04343 172 132 30 10
3898 The reports of chivalry's death have been greatly exaggerated. 1.2907 0.03932 172 127 40 5
3899 If you make that "She wanted a 'knight' out" joke one time I will get medieval on you. 1.2907 0.04101 172 129 36 7
3900 Expectation once again trumps reality. 1.2905 0.04623 148 113 27 8
3901 It's just that our date knights feel so cliché. 1.2905 0.04523 148 112 29 7
3902 Oh, boy...., I should never have said I hoped to meet my knight in shining armor... 1.2905 0.03917 179 133 40 6
3903 Would it be weird if I asked for a straw? 1.2905 0.04372 179 139 28 12
3904 It looks like I’m going to need to use a can opener to really get to know you 1.2905 0.04151 179 136 34 9
3905 Lancelot always removed his helmet at dinner. 1.2905 0.03917 179 133 40 6
3906 Oh just fuck off 1.2905 0.04372 179 139 28 12
3907 When I said I wanted a knight in shining armor, I didn’t expect to be taken literally. 1.2903 0.04191 155 115 35 5
3908 You must come out of your shell, Henry, if we're to keep seeing one another. 1.2903 0.04191 155 115 35 5
3909 I did say I preferred an old fashioned date..... 1.2903 0.04290 155 116 33 6
3910 I was wrong. This will be a knight to remember! 1.2903 0.03824 186 138 42 6
3911 Hey, your profile said you were looking for a fun night. 1.2903 0.03973 186 140 38 8
3912 I forgot to tell the genie "adjustable visor." 1.2903 0.04841 155 122 21 12
3913 I had expected a bit more shine. 1.2903 0.03899 186 139 40 7
3914 When I said in my dating profile I was looking for a night person this was not what I had in mind. 1.2902 0.03809 193 144 42 7
3915 Since I’m over 65, I’m taking precautions until I get my flu shot next week. 1.2901 0.04170 162 121 35 6
3916 This is quite a reversion from chastity belts. 1.2901 0.04261 162 122 33 7
3917 If you need a straw then ask for one. 1.2901 0.04261 162 122 33 7
3918 Back when we got married I thought I wanted a knight in shining armor, but now I have regrets. 1.2901 0.04261 162 122 33 7
3919 Oil can what? 1.2901 0.04523 162 125 27 10
3920 I never liked history . 1.2901 0.04350 162 123 31 8
3921 So, this is what you call a night out? 1.2901 0.04350 162 123 31 8
3922 I'm really more of a white knight. 1.2901 0.04261 162 122 33 7
3923 I'm trying to open up. 1.2901 0.04438 162 124 29 9
3924 Would you like a straw with that ? 1.2899 0.04230 169 128 33 8
3925 I know it’s a first date, but you could let your guard down a notch. 1.2899 0.04312 169 129 31 9
3926 Knight in shinning armor was just a metaphor 1.2899 0.04146 169 127 35 7
3927 Yes, I know I said I was looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.2899 0.04312 169 129 31 9
3928 So this is a 'knight to remember'! 1.2899 0.04627 169 133 23 13
3929 So how do you feel about pet dragons? 1.2899 0.04230 169 128 33 8
3930 This is not what I expected when my sister said she knew this blind date was going to be my knight in shining armor. 1.2899 0.04393 169 130 29 10
3931 Your hair looks nice, too. 1.2899 0.04393 169 130 29 10
3932 Don’t worry, I’m wearing the Chastity Belt tonight. 1.2899 0.04846 138 106 24 8
3933 I think I might need a straw. 1.2899 0.04266 138 101 34 3
3934 I don’t think this will work. I won’t convert from cotton to chastity belt. 1.2899 0.04623 138 104 28 6
3935 I like white wines too, but they make me rust. 1.2898 0.04196 176 134 33 9
3936 Fine time to give up straws 1.2898 0.04422 176 137 27 12
3937 I liked you better in blue jeans 1.2898 0.03874 176 130 41 5
3938 So, how are you enjoying your knight out? 1.2898 0.04196 176 134 33 9
3939 It's not that I don't like you Betsy. You're just too guarded for me. 1.2898 0.04196 176 134 33 9
3940 I'm not getting a haircut...okay Mommy! I'm not...I'm not... okay?...I'm not... 1.2898 0.04348 176 136 29 11
3941 Great, another special date knight. 1.2896 0.04014 183 138 37 8
3942 When my profile said "Looking for my knight in shining armor," I didn't mean it literally. 1.2896 0.04160 183 140 33 10
3943 so you voted for trump ? 1.2895 0.04633 152 117 26 9
3944 Sure, I'll call you 'Sir.' If you call me 'Your Majesty.' 1.2895 0.04191 190 147 31 12
3945 This is my 13th step. 1.2893 0.04212 197 154 29 14
3946 No, it's exactly as shining as in my profile pic. 1.2893 0.04580 159 123 26 10
3947 During the Beatle Years, "Sir Paul" took his knighthood rather seriously. 1.2893 0.04492 159 122 28 9
3948 You are the most chivalrous blind date I have ever met. 1.2893 0.04492 159 122 28 9
3949 For a knight in shining armor, you sure don't know how to pick the wine. 1.2893 0.04403 159 121 30 8
3950 You may think this wine has a slight metallic finish; I think it's joust about right. 1.2893 0.04403 159 121 30 8
3951 Knight: What do you mean, "I didn't mean literally." 1.2893 0.04311 159 120 32 7
3952 ... but damsel seeks her knight WAS a metaphor... 1.2893 0.04122 159 118 36 5
3953 It was then that Karen realized the knight in shining armor might need more than a little WD-40 to open up. 1.2893 0.04492 159 122 28 9
3954 It was only a joust. 1.2892 0.03740 204 153 43 8
3955 First blind date. Second Round Table. 1.2892 0.04191 166 125 34 7
3956 He took my line, ‘Looking for my knight in shining armor,’ to a whole new level. 1.2892 0.04362 166 127 30 9
3957 I might be overdressed 1.2892 0.03921 166 122 40 4
3958 No, not another one knghter. 1.2890 0.04321 173 133 30 10
3959 Well, this isn't a knight to remember! 1.2890 0.03997 173 129 38 6
3960 The act of disrobing is just a little squeaky. 1.2890 0.04081 173 130 36 7
3961 You seemed taller on the website 1.2890 0.04081 173 130 36 7
3962 It’ll make more sense when you see me joust later. 1.2890 0.03912 173 128 40 5
3963 Well, yes, I asked for a knight in shining armor. I might add that I think this dating service is too damn literal. 1.2890 0.03997 173 129 38 6
3964 I feel it is important to create an external manifestation of my emotional availability at the beginning of every Tinder date. 1.2889 0.04205 180 138 32 10
3965 I'm really not all that into metallica. 1.2889 0.04055 180 136 36 8
3966 Yes, my profile did say that I was looking for my knight in shining armor, but I think you might have taken that too literally. 1.2889 0.04278 180 139 30 11
3967 Are you repeating yourself or is there an echo in there? 1.2889 0.04055 180 136 36 8
3968 I can't see you again. You're dating your self. 1.2889 0.04055 180 136 36 8
3969 Forget I ever mentioned marriage. 1.2888 0.04167 187 144 32 11
3970 It's only our second date and already you're ashamed to be seen with me? 1.2887 0.04064 194 149 34 11
3971 Red? Really? 1.2886 0.04290 149 111 33 5
3972 I suppose you did say you wanted our meeting to be just like old times. 1.2885 0.04363 156 118 31 7
3973 Should I ask if they have straws? 1.2883 0.04414 163 125 29 9
3974 Virgin or not, your mother's not going to dictate what you wear forever. 1.2883 0.04414 163 125 29 9
3975 'Just Lunch' usually means ,casual. 1.2883 0.04239 163 123 33 7
3976 When you said you were an "iron man" I had a different picture in mind. 1.2883 0.04499 163 126 27 10
3977 Wow, I didn't even know there was a season for dragons. 1.2883 0.04056 163 121 37 5
3978 I mistakenly assumed a knight of role play was a typo. 1.2883 0.04499 163 126 27 10
3979 I'm really into heavy metal. 1.2883 0.04239 163 123 33 7
3980 What do you mean it's joust lunch? 1.2883 0.04327 163 124 31 8
3981 ...so then they told me modern knighthoods were mostly ceremonial. 1.2883 0.04327 163 124 31 8
3982 Amanda had hoped for a night to remember! 1.2882 0.04449 170 132 27 11
3983 I hear you were hurt when your last relationship broke up 1.2882 0.04039 170 127 37 6
3984 It was a metaphor 1.2882 0.04039 170 127 37 6
3985 Well lets have a Knight Cap!!! 1.2881 0.04326 177 137 29 11
3986 Well, pardon me for trying to add a dash of gallantry to date night. 1.2881 0.04175 177 135 33 9
3987 You’re not as shiney as you said you were. 1.2881 0.04018 177 133 37 7
3988 It’s a process. Last month I sold my steed and ditched my weapons. 1.2881 0.04175 177 135 33 9
3989 It said - Jackets Required . . . You didn't need a Suit 1.2881 0.04175 177 135 33 9
3990 The Cabernet Sauvignon, the ambience—none of it matters. You are as inscrutable as ever. 1.2881 0.04326 177 137 29 11
3991 No, I can't drink it. I just watch it age. 1.2881 0.03938 177 132 39 6
3992 Would you like a straw with your drink ? 1.2881 0.03771 177 130 43 4
3993 Is it just me, or does this red have a slight metallic taste to it? 1.2881 0.04175 177 135 33 9
3994 Everyone exaggerates on their profile. Who knew? 1.2881 0.04098 177 134 35 8
3995 It's the mouthpiece, Marge - do you have a Phillips with you? 1.2881 0.04175 177 135 33 9
3996 Well, I'm in pest control. 1.2881 0.04175 177 135 33 9
3997 I'm in knight school at night school. You? 1.2880 0.04212 184 142 31 11
3998 We can go back to my place and Lance-a-lot. 1.2880 0.03969 191 145 37 9
3999 That's not what I meant when I said let's play it safe. 1.2880 0.03755 191 142 43 6
4000 It's too bad they don't offer straws anymore. 1.2880 0.04172 191 148 31 12
4001 It’s time to call it a night.” 1.2880 0.03969 191 145 37 9
4002 At least you made an effort. 1.2879 0.04629 132 99 28 5
4003 First dates are always so awkward... 1.2877 0.03706 212 160 43 9
4004 Not until you lift the visor! 1.2877 0.04450 146 110 30 6
4005 You look exactly like the picture you posted on Tinder. 1.2876 0.04606 153 118 26 9
4006 I think you might have taken my dating profile a little too literally. 1.2876 0.04606 153 118 26 9
4007 This wasn't the night I was hoping for 1.2876 0.04317 153 115 32 6
4008 What's the matter? My profile says I'm a knight in shining armor." 1.2875 0.04724 160 126 22 12
4009 Well, are you going to drink that glass of wine or not? 1.2875 0.04100 160 119 36 5
4010 Actually, I'm looking for Mr. Right, ​not Knight 1.2875 0.04195 160 120 34 6
4011 Where are the rest of the knights for this round table? 1.2875 0.04288 160 121 32 7
4012 are you goin’ to drink that? 1.2875 0.04468 160 123 28 9
4013 Yes, something is wrong. Wine usually opens me up. 1.2875 0.04195 160 120 34 6
4014 Not exactly what I meant when I said I wanted a night out. 1.2874 0.04170 167 126 34 7
4015 I’m leaving it on until the renaissance 1.2874 0.04503 167 130 26 11
4016 - So, your profile said you live by the Cloisters? 1.2874 0.04170 167 126 34 7
4017 You're going to need a straw with that. 1.2874 0.04082 167 125 36 6
4018 Sorry, the knight time is definitely not the right time. 1.2874 0.04061 174 131 36 7
4019 Ya know,You looked better in your profile picture 1.2874 0.04061 174 131 36 7
4020 Wow, you really do look exactly like your picture on the Internet. 1.2874 0.04598 174 138 22 14
4021 So when you promised a night to remember, I didn't know you meant #AKnightToRemember 1.2874 0.04376 174 135 28 11
4022 I thought I’d loosen up after a few glasses. 1.2873 0.03719 181 133 44 4
4023 The firm dropped my life insurance policy. 1.2873 0.04111 181 138 34 9
4024 I told you I worked undercover for the CIA....is this going to be a problem? 1.2873 0.04111 181 138 34 9
4025 Yes, I do own several cats. Why do you ask? 1.2873 0.03959 181 136 38 7
4026 On second thought, it probably was not a good idea for me to include the "I'm looking for my knight is shining armor'"metaphor in my online dating profile. 1.2872 0.04110 195 151 32 12
4027 I thought my knight in shining armor would order a better Merlot. 1.2871 0.03823 202 153 40 9
4028 I prefer the word goblet. 1.2868 0.04657 136 103 27 6
4029 I’m confused, I thought you said Charming, not Valient . 1.2867 0.04396 143 107 31 5
4030 Oh, no....it is very liberating. I no longer need to worry about makeup in the least! 1.2867 0.04570 150 115 27 8
4031 For a knight in shining armor, the conversation is rather dull 1.2866 0.04432 157 120 29 8
4032 Why do they always sit us at the roundtable? 1.2866 0.04786 157 124 21 12
4033 My dating profile wasn't supposed to be taken so literally. 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
4034 You do realize that “A Knight In Shining Armor” was a metaphor. 1.2866 0.04432 157 120 29 8
4035 I AM open to taking a risk. I ordered a merlot with fish! 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
4036 His online profile said he was a professor. It turns out it was for knight school. 1.2866 0.04432 157 120 29 8
4037 Here’s to a knight you’ll never forget. 1.2866 0.04523 157 121 27 9
4038 What do you mean you're having a bad Knight? 1.2866 0.04700 157 123 23 11
4039 A man's home is not his castle, dear. 1.2866 0.04612 157 122 25 10
4040 So if we dress up at this renaissance restaurant we get 10% off? 1.2866 0.04243 157 118 33 6
4041 I’m being standoff-ish? 1.2866 0.04391 164 126 29 9
4042 It's the hairstyle I am struggling with -- so 1950's 1.2866 0.04217 164 124 33 7
4043 For the record, madam, I think it is you who did not appropriately dress for the occasion. 1.2866 0.04304 164 125 31 8
4044 I didn't realize that's what my friend meant when she said you had broad shoulders and were into chivalry. 1.2866 0.04127 164 123 35 6
4045 Really...how old are you? 1.2866 0.04217 164 124 33 7
4046 So, you said wanted to talk to me? 1.2866 0.04217 164 124 33 7
4047 When you asked me to join you at the round table, I had something different in mind 1.2865 0.03933 171 127 39 5
4048 My transition is nearly complete... then I’ll be Sir Marion. 1.2865 0.04187 171 130 33 8
4049 I've been waiting centuries for this date 1.2865 0.04104 171 129 35 7
4050 You're right, I did say on my profile I was looking for my knight in shining armor" 1.2865 0.04268 171 131 31 9
4051 I'm a Dame, not a Damsel. 1.2865 0.04268 171 131 31 9
4052 Your dating profile asked for a knight in shining armor. 1.2865 0.04268 171 131 31 9
4053 The 'knight is shining armor ' was just a suggestion really . . . 1.2865 0.03933 171 127 39 5
4054 Yes I guess I did say I was looking for a knight in shining armor 1.2865 0.04426 171 133 27 11
4055 Your ad said you were a rather private person. 1.2865 0.04078 178 135 35 8
4056 You won't need a can opener. 1.2865 0.03837 178 132 41 5
4057 I thought I was invited for a night out. 1.2865 0.03999 178 134 37 7
4058 I'm just not ready to be your liege. It's me, it's not you. 1.2865 0.03976 185 140 37 8
4059 I didn't think my dream coming true would be so literal. 1.2865 0.04049 185 141 35 9
4060 Okay, so you're from another century. I'm from another planet. 1.2865 0.04121 185 142 33 10
4061 I've dated men who were closed up before, but you'll be my greatest challenge yet. 1.2865 0.03664 192 142 45 5
4062 Do I have something in my teeth? 1.2857 0.04234 168 128 32 8
4063 Why don’t you ask the waiter for a straw? 1.2857 0.04277 175 135 30 10
4064 I'm looking for a man who DRIVES a Mustang. 1.2857 0.04698 161 127 22 12
4065 If you had swiped up, my faceplate would be off. 1.2857 0.04200 175 134 32 9
4066 OK. Fine. You’re my knight in shining armor. But do you have anything else to bring to the table? 1.2857 0.04447 182 144 24 14
4067 Hardly a recent photo, was it, Mr.Hot4TrueLove? 1.2857 0.04091 182 139 34 9
4068 Now I'm wondering why I ever thought that what I really wanted was a knight in shining armor. 1.2857 0.04173 161 121 34 6
4069 Honesty, I'm more into fashion from the 1980's than the 980's. 1.2857 0.03862 182 136 40 6
4070 Your profile said 'shining'.... 1.2857 0.03875 175 130 40 5
4071 I didn’t mean to offend you, a butt is a medieval measurement of wine. 1.2857 0.04237 182 141 30 11
4072 You misread my dating profile. All I wanted was a simple date night. 1.2857 0.04317 168 129 30 9
4073 Gwen, let's go find a can opener. 1.2857 0.04265 161 122 32 7
4074 I have a tendency to be fairly guarded on first dates 1.2857 0.03973 168 125 38 5
4075 I guess that your therapy to open up did not work 1.2857 0.04265 161 122 32 7
4076 Since when should I not take you literally?" 1.2857 0.04265 161 122 32 7
4077 So, your profile said you were looking for your knight in shining armor? 1.2857 0.04149 168 127 34 7
4078 Your bio said you're into metal. 1.2857 0.04016 182 138 36 8
4079 I see that you have clad yourself in more than just emotional armor. 1.2857 0.04528 147 112 28 7
4080 I get it. You men can never be too safe. 1.2857 0.04528 147 112 28 7
4081 I may have been a little too specific on my profile. 1.2857 0.04121 175 133 34 8
4082 Why do I always feel you are so emotionally closed off? 1.2857 0.04391 154 117 30 7
4083 We may need to rethink this Date Knight thing! 1.2857 0.04234 168 128 32 8
4084 Can I expect Camelot later” 1.2857 0.04355 161 123 30 8
4085 No really, who said chivalry is dead? 1.2857 0.04355 161 123 30 8
4086 I had something else in mind for a good night. 1.2857 0.03958 175 131 38 6
4087 Will you need a straw? 1.2857 0.04200 175 134 32 9
4088 I'm sorry. I was told this restaurant had a Smoting Section. 1.2857 0.04121 175 133 34 8
4089 Well, you said you wanted to meet your knight in shining armour. Now what about me? I said I wanted a fairy princess. 1.2857 0.04060 189 145 34 10
4090 So... chivalry isn't dead 1.2857 0.04121 175 133 34 8
4091 I'm not really in distress, and quit calling me a damsel. 1.2857 0.04237 182 141 30 11
4092 Well, this will certainly be a knight to remember. 1.2857 0.04615 161 126 24 11
4093 I suppose I did say I am in search of my knight in shining armor in my profile. 1.2857 0.04234 168 128 32 8
4094 It's a profile metaphor, Stanley. I don't literally want a 'Knight in Shining Armor'. 1.2849 0.04210 179 138 31 10
4095 You may be a knight in shining armor, but playing footsies with you just broke my toe! 1.2849 0.04210 179 138 31 10
4096 It seems my dating app wish list was taken too literally... 1.2849 0.04326 172 133 29 10
4097 Check, mate, my queen? 1.2849 0.04247 172 132 31 9
4098 I guess you could say I Lance. A. Lot. Ha ha ha hA hA HA HA HA!!! ... where are you going!? 1.2848 0.04015 165 123 37 5
4099 But it was your vulnerability that attracted me to you in the first place! 1.2848 0.04614 165 130 23 12
4100 I love what you've done with your face shield. 1.2848 0.04587 158 123 25 10
4101 Wanna cut our losses? This date has been a Knightmare. 1.2848 0.04498 158 122 27 9
4102 I'm tired of fighting ,let's just have a nice quiet dinner 1.2848 0.04498 158 122 27 9
4103 This gives new meaning to a Blind Date. 1.2848 0.04826 151 119 21 11
4104 I used the term "knight in shining armor" as a metaphor. 1.2847 0.04794 144 112 23 9
4105 Did you bring a shrubbery? 1.2842 0.04177 190 148 30 12
4106 You do look just like your profile picture. 1.2842 0.04217 183 142 30 11
4107 Just come out and say it,you don't like the wine. 1.2842 0.03922 183 138 38 7
4108 You look exactly like your Facebook photo! 1.2842 0.04072 183 140 34 9
4109 So I guess you've heard about 'Me Too'? 1.2842 0.04217 183 142 30 11
4110 Yes, dear, I can honestly say you’re my knight in dining armor. 1.2842 0.04072 183 140 34 9
4111 I always imagined my first one night stand being quite different. 1.2842 0.04072 183 140 34 9
4112 You want me to get you a straw? 1.2842 0.03922 183 138 38 7
4113 Your Match.com profile did say you're 'looking for my knight in shining armor', did it not? 1.2841 0.04101 176 134 34 8
4114 If you don't mind, I'll just ask for a straw 1.2840 0.04041 169 127 36 6
4115 Cute Keira but hardly subtle. They’re going to find out about us eventually. 1.2840 0.03953 169 126 38 5
4116 Admittedly I fall a little short of being a true Renaissance man. 1.2840 0.04127 169 128 34 7
4117 I adore our date nights at the round table. 1.2840 0.04041 169 127 36 6
4118 It's so rare to meet someone who looks exactly like their online dating profile 1.2840 0.04456 169 132 26 11
4119 Harold, I find you difficult to be with because you are so inflexible. 1.2840 0.03771 169 124 42 3
4120 This is not what I meant when I suggested we have a date night. 1.2840 0.04041 169 127 36 6
4121 Honey I don't mind the outfit but must we really take Uber Steed? 1.2840 0.03953 169 126 38 5
4122 So, you don’t think I’m hot? 1.2840 0.04332 162 124 30 8
4123 So....you say you don't get many second dates? I can't imagine why. 1.2840 0.04151 162 122 34 6
4124 You say you're a little wary of involvement after your divorce? 1.2840 0.04419 162 125 28 9
4125 Where’s my damn straw? 1.2840 0.04242 162 123 32 7
4126 My ex really did a number on me, but I thought it was time I put myself out there. 1.2840 0.04419 162 125 28 9
4127 It's just been so hard to get through to men lately. 1.2840 0.04242 162 123 32 7
4128 When you said you said you’d give me a night to remember, I had no idea ... 1.2840 0.04242 162 123 32 7
4129 I hardly recognize you from your online dating profile. 1.2840 0.03962 162 120 38 4
4130 My friend warned me you’d show me one hell of a Knight. 1.2839 0.04645 155 121 24 10
4131 I have this ironclad proposal for you. 1.2839 0.04461 155 119 28 8
4132 See? This is why they shouldn’t outlaw straws. 1.2839 0.04170 155 116 34 5
4133 Sure, the cherry notes are nice. I wouldn't storm a castle for another bottle, though. 1.2839 0.04366 155 118 30 7
4134 I'm getting a little tired of requesting straws. 1.2839 0.04366 155 118 30 7
4135 Do you always take the wording in personal ads so literally? 1.2839 0.04461 155 119 28 8
4136 For the last time, Sally, I’m not a spit bucket. 1.2838 0.04501 148 113 28 7
4137 Shall I call you "Sir"? 1.2837 0.05066 141 112 18 11
4138 I should have taken your description on the dating site literally. 1.2837 0.04756 141 109 24 8
4139 A "middle-aged shut-in", eh? 1.2836 0.04570 134 101 28 5
4140 No, I meant a night alone. 1.2834 0.03866 187 141 39 7
4141 The lighting is a bit dim in here, isn't it? 1.2833 0.03718 180 133 43 4
4142 When you asked if I wanted to meet some night, this isn’t what I had in mind. 1.2833 0.04039 180 137 35 8
4143 You look nothing like your online photo! 1.2833 0.04115 180 138 33 9
4144 Ok, let me hear your ironclad accuse for forgetting our anniversary. 1.2832 0.04225 173 133 31 9
4145 I told you it was Ladies Night, not Ladies “Knight”. 1.2832 0.03979 173 130 37 6
4146 I suspected my dating app was archaic, - but, really. 1.2832 0.04145 173 132 33 8
4147 I'm not sure that the "knight in shinning armor" comment on the online dating application should be taken quite so literally. 1.2832 0.04304 173 134 29 10
4148 I guess this is what I get asking for a date "night". 1.2832 0.03979 173 130 37 6
4149 Is this your first date? You seem a bit “guarded.” 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
4150 I think I would have preferred a quiet night in. 1.2831 0.04259 166 127 31 8
4151 Sorry I'm late. It was hell parking my horse. 1.2831 0.04259 166 127 31 8
4152 My ex-wife told me chivalry was dead. 1.2831 0.04173 166 126 33 7
4153 I didn't realize you were speaking metaphorically. 1.2831 0.04173 166 126 33 7
4154 I still care for you too, Lance, but we both know the distress went long ago and, frankly, I've always felt uncomfortable with the term 'damsel'. 1.2831 0.04344 166 128 29 9
4155 I guess you meant it when your profile said “night in shining armor” 1.2830 0.04291 159 121 31 7
4156 So, who's your plume stylist? 1.2830 0.04561 159 124 25 10
4157 So, you said in your tinder bio that you have a pet dragon? 1.2830 0.04291 159 121 31 7
4158 Don't want to hurt your feelings, Sir, but when I posted information, I said I can only date "at night," not I can only date "a knight." 1.2830 0.04816 159 127 19 13
4159 Not my knight tonight. 1.2829 0.04420 152 116 29 7
4160 I really thought you'd hold the door open. 1.2829 0.04218 152 114 33 5
4161 If I’m being honest, this is for emotional wounds as much as the swordplay. 1.2829 0.04218 152 114 33 5
4162 Everyone wants a knight in shining armor, but what about my needs? 1.2828 0.04864 145 114 21 10
4163 I know your dating profile said you were guarded about future relationships, but this is ridiculous. 1.2827 0.04023 191 147 34 10
4164 Really? This is what you think "Wear a suit" means? Just wait until you drag me to another one of your mother's brunches. I'm gonna put on a dress like you have never seen my love. 1.2826 0.04239 138 102 33 3
4165 I didn't literally mean a Knight in Shining in Armour. 1.2826 0.04482 138 104 29 5
4166 I guess you're technically right. My profile did say I was a "night" person. 1.2826 0.04053 184 141 34 9
4167 I feel your withdrawing from me. 1.2826 0.04125 184 142 32 10
4168 Your profile requested 'a one knight stan.' And my name really is Stanley, Stan to my friends. 1.2826 0.04197 184 143 30 11
4169 Strangers in the Knight? How many guys you got in there with you? 1.2825 0.04528 177 141 22 14
4170 Well, you said you didn't want a physical involvement. 1.2825 0.04235 177 137 30 10
4171 No, I do not wish to leave with you on your steed. 1.2825 0.03753 177 131 42 4
4172 What did you expect on girl's knight out? 1.2825 0.04001 177 134 36 7
4173 The metaphorical is a bit sexier than the literal embodiment. 1.2825 0.04001 177 134 36 7
4174 I don't own a horse, but I can get you a straw. 1.2824 0.04504 131 98 29 4
4175 Are you looking for another knight out? 1.2824 0.04353 170 132 28 10
4176 Of course rust is always a problem..... 1.2824 0.04353 170 132 28 10
4177 Our kingdom is looking for legal guidance, Cheryl, not life advice. 1.2824 0.04021 170 128 36 6
4178 Another alternative to prevent stains from wine spills would be to use a napkin. 1.2824 0.03933 170 127 38 5
4179 When I asked for a night on the town, this isn’t what I meant. 1.2824 0.04353 170 132 28 10
4180 Can't you just let go for a minute? 1.2824 0.04106 170 129 34 7
4181 So, what kind of night are you looking for? 1.2824 0.04021 170 128 36 6
4182 You're always so closed off. 1.2822 0.04129 163 123 34 6
4183 I used to be able to identify the vintage, but I have become a bit rusty. 1.2822 0.04647 163 129 22 12
4184 Hey, this isn't my idea of the perfect date either. 1.2822 0.04220 163 124 32 7
4185 Well your bio did say you enjoyed the Middle Ages. 1.2822 0.04396 163 126 28 9
4186 It's gotta be bittersweet - sacking a city and then finding out they banned straws. 1.2822 0.04129 163 123 34 6
4187 You never mentioned heraldry in your profile. 1.2822 0.04396 163 126 28 9
4188 And besides, I just don’t think you have the mettle I’m looking for. 1.2822 0.04129 163 123 34 6
4189 I just wanted flowers every now and then. 1.2821 0.04436 156 120 28 8
4190 Your profile said you're looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.2821 0.04246 156 118 32 6
4191 Well...in your profile you did lament the death of chivalry. 1.2821 0.04342 156 119 30 7
4192 Well they let me in, didn't they? 1.2821 0.04436 156 120 28 8
4193 Susan Collins looked up and realized that her only drinking buddy, her bodyguard, was like all her recent policies: antiquated. 1.2821 0.04097 195 152 31 12
4194 I’m a fighter, not a lover. 1.2821 0.04529 156 121 26 9
4195 Do you think that this restaurant has any straws? 1.2819 0.04268 149 112 32 5
4196 So, your profile said you wanted a man who would be your night in shining armour... 1.2819 0.04575 149 115 26 8
4197 For the millionth time, I did not bring the can opener. Just go in your suit. 1.2819 0.04673 149 116 24 9
4198 You seem nice. But when I said I was looking for my knight in shining armor, I actually meant it metaphorically. 1.2819 0.04575 149 115 26 8
4199 Shall I have the valet bring my steed around? 1.2818 0.03783 181 135 41 5
4200 The armor, everything, you look exactly like your dating profile. I appreciate that. 1.2818 0.03942 181 137 37 7
4201 To be honest, your armour is just not that shiny. 1.2818 0.04019 181 138 35 8
4202 Look - I know I'm not exactly "shining" but at least I'm here 1.2817 0.04727 142 110 24 8
4203 I'd like to add you to my LinkedIn network 1.2816 0.04435 174 137 25 12
4204 I assumed you meant to type “middle aged,” but here you are: a Middle Ages hunk looking to mingle. 1.2816 0.03960 174 131 37 6
4205 I just find in relationships, that my defense mechanisms get in the way.. 1.2816 0.03875 174 130 39 5
4206 I said go out on a date, not outdated. 1.2814 0.04322 167 129 29 9
4207 I see chivalry is not dead 1.2814 0.03882 167 124 39 4
4208 A "Dark and Stormy" , yes? 1.2814 0.03882 167 124 39 4
4209 So, wine isn't the lubricant you were looking for? 1.2814 0.04322 167 129 29 9
4210 My friends heard stories and told me to wear protection. 1.2814 0.04063 167 126 35 6
4211 So what took you so long? 1.2814 0.04151 167 127 33 7
4212 If you use a plastic straw, I'm going to throw this drink in your face. 1.2814 0.04565 167 132 23 12
4213 Thought I mentioned in my profile that I'm not a night person 1.2814 0.04565 167 132 23 12
4214 Somehow, I misunderstood when you asked me out for a nightcap. 1.2814 0.04038 199 155 32 12
4215 Just who do you think you are, Don Quixote? 1.2812 0.04072 192 149 32 11
4216 Maybe we should joust be friends. 1.2812 0.04268 160 122 31 7
4217 The work is challenging. 1.2812 0.04449 160 124 27 9
4218 Your ad did say that chivalry is not dead. 1.2812 0.03722 192 144 42 6
4219 Defense mechanisms? No, I'm more of a people person. 1.2812 0.03982 160 119 37 4
4220 You looked taller at the joust. 1.2811 0.04034 185 142 34 9
4221 You sing, “Good knight, Irene” one more time and I’ll have you welded in! 1.2810 0.04491 153 118 27 8
4222 You look different from your profile photos 1.2810 0.04491 153 118 27 8
4223 I'm not in distress, but yes, your armor is nice and shiny. 1.2810 0.04395 153 117 29 7
4224 I'm taking my #MeToo Defense to a whole new level. 1.2810 0.04194 153 115 33 5
4225 The wine is bold and assertive But I don’t think it will attack you. 1.2810 0.04296 153 116 31 6
4226 I get that this is the blood of your enemies, but is it a vintage year? 1.2810 0.04770 153 121 21 11
4227 Clearly one of us has too much wine to drink. 1.2809 0.03901 178 134 38 6
4228 I'm sometimes accused of taking things too literally. 1.2809 0.03901 178 134 38 6
4229 I appreciate your chivalry, but I think it’s time to let your armour down, honey. 1.2809 0.03982 178 135 36 7
4230 Just because I said on Tinder I wanted a "knight in shining armor" doesn't mean I want a knight in shining armor. 1.2809 0.04138 178 137 32 9
4231 When I said I was looking for a knight in shining armor I was speaking figuratively. 1.2809 0.03735 178 132 42 4
4232 I'm really not much of a knight person myself. 1.2807 0.04001 171 129 36 6
4233 They promised me it would be a knight to remember. 1.2807 0.04086 171 130 34 7
4234 This is a dangerous time for all boys in America. I must protect myself! 1.2807 0.04487 171 135 24 12
4235 If you ask for a straw, I am out of here! 1.2807 0.04410 171 134 26 11
4236 I think you misheard me when I said "Wine Night" 1.2807 0.04563 171 136 22 13
4237 And you want me to wear a chastity belt! 1.2807 0.04251 171 132 30 9
4238 Personally, I think the movement has gone a bit too far. 1.2807 0.04331 171 133 28 10
4239 Cheap wine ruins everything. 1.2807 0.04251 171 132 30 9
4240 This isn’t the night I expected. 1.2805 0.04197 164 125 32 7
4241 This'll be a knight to remember. 1.2805 0.04107 164 124 34 6
4242 You *said* you wanted one romantic knight 1.2805 0.04457 164 128 26 10
4243 When I told you to put on a suit for dinner, I didn.t mean armor! 1.2805 0.04197 164 125 32 7
4244 I think you're my knight in shining armor. 1.2805 0.04286 164 126 30 8
4245 Steeling Herself for an Armourous Evening 1.2805 0.04540 164 129 24 11
4246 You don't look anything like your Tinder photo! 1.2805 0.04372 164 127 28 9
4247 My dream is to run for the Supreme Court someday 1.2803 0.04318 157 120 30 7
4248 I'm sorry you've had such bad experiences with blind dates. 1.2803 0.04318 157 120 30 7
4249 No, you’re too defensive! 1.2803 0.04503 157 122 26 9
4250 I found it in the MeToo department for Halloween. 1.2803 0.04318 157 120 30 7
4251 One other thing, What happened to the foil tie the kids made for you? 1.2802 0.04000 182 139 35 8
4252 Your armor was shinier on Tinder. 1.2802 0.04222 182 142 29 11
4253 Sooo..do you enjoy your work at the Medieval Times? 1.2800 0.04023 175 133 35 7
4254 So this is what you call an iron clad defense? 1.2800 0.04104 175 134 33 8
4255 You're really nice, Frank, but I'm not looking for a knight in shining armor at the moment. 1.2800 0.04337 175 137 27 11
4256 Straws are banned here. You have to open that thing. 1.2800 0.03856 175 131 39 5
4257 '"Well, on Tinder you said you valued chivalry." 1.2800 0.03770 175 130 41 4
4258 I meant it literally. 1.2800 0.04104 175 134 33 8
4259 Not exactly shining, I know, but I think you'll find that what I lack in shine, I make up for with intellect, my dear." 1.2800 0.04243 150 113 32 5
4260 I said meet me for a NIGHT cap! 1.2800 0.04023 175 133 35 7
4261 Yes, I would give you gallant. 1.2800 0.03856 175 131 39 5
4262 Well, on the dating site did say I have an active knight life. No, it wasn't a typo. 1.2798 0.04462 168 132 25 11
4263 I was really excited when you said "tonight's the night" on the phone. 1.2798 0.04462 168 132 25 11
4264 I think you over read the personal ad that I was looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.2798 0.04130 168 128 33 7
4265 If I promise to see a dentist, can I take the helmet off? 1.2798 0.04215 168 129 31 8
4266 It's not you. It's the shining armour. 1.2798 0.04215 168 129 31 8
4267 What makes you think I'm NOT your knight in shining armor? 1.2798 0.03862 168 125 39 4
4268 I would offer you a straw but I have stopped using plastic. 1.2798 0.04215 168 129 31 8
4269 Stalemate 1.2796 0.03634 211 160 43 8
4270 How do feel about visiting my family in Camelot this year? 1.2796 0.04015 186 143 34 9
4271 Actually...I think we should see other people. 1.2796 0.03942 186 142 36 8
4272 It’s our second date but I am not ready to let my guard down yet 1.2796 0.03554 186 137 46 3
4273 I don't know, Galahad - you just seem so closed off these days. 1.2795 0.04058 161 121 35 5
4274 I just assumed NISA meant ‘not into sexual adventure’ 1.2795 0.04424 161 125 27 9
4275 Well,I can't say this is the most disarming blind date I've ever had." 1.2795 0.04511 161 126 25 10
4276 They told me it was a night on the town. 1.2793 0.04041 179 137 34 8
4277 I have to say, you do clean up good, with a little steel wool. 1.2793 0.04268 179 140 28 11
4278 When I said on my profile “knight in shining armour”, This is not what I expected. 1.2793 0.03883 179 135 38 6
4279 I assume you're using the term "joust" metaphorically. 1.2793 0.03883 179 135 38 6
4280 Amore ---- it's amore!!! 1.2793 0.04041 179 137 34 8
4281 This is not what I expected when you said this would be the best night of my life... 1.2793 0.04194 179 139 30 10
4282 No, the patriarchy is now a bad thing. 1.2793 0.03963 179 136 36 7
4283 Whence shall I start? 1.2793 0.04118 179 138 32 9
4284 It's a shame they don't have straws anymore. 1.2792 0.04370 154 118 29 7
4285 Yes, it’s permanent. Why do you ask? 1.2792 0.03796 197 150 39 8
4286 I meant a 'night out' not a 'knight out', darn that spellcheck 1.2791 0.04229 172 133 30 9
4287 You look a little different on your profile. 1.2791 0.03894 172 129 38 5
4288 I do feel safe with you Norm, but - #MeToo, #SchmeTo - there are also nights when Mama just wants some giddyup. 1.2791 0.04148 172 132 32 8
4289 Even for a knight in shining armor, your verbal jousting is a bit much. 1.2791 0.04148 172 132 32 8
4290 I was looking for a special night, but this isn't what I had in mind. 1.2791 0.04065 172 131 34 7
4291 I'm sorry but you look nothing like your profile picture. 1.2789 0.04026 190 147 33 10
4292 You're carrying your attempt at Irony too far! 1.2789 0.04608 147 114 25 8
4293 I'm just saying your armor doesn't shine anymore. 1.2788 0.04263 165 127 30 8
4294 Well you aren't all that shining, and I think you're being defensive! 1.2788 0.03994 165 124 36 5
4295 Here's to a cultural reset embracing courtly love. 1.2788 0.04263 165 127 30 8
4296 When I said it I meant, treat me like a real lady: take me places I’d like to go, open the door every once in a while, sweep me off my feet. But this is fine… I guess. 1.2788 0.03805 165 122 40 3
4297 Well I did say I was waiting for my knight in shining armor 1.2788 0.04433 165 129 26 10
4298 It's only til you're sure you want me to kiss you. 1.2788 0.04175 165 126 32 7
4299 You do realize a knight in shining armor is an idiom? 1.2788 0.04433 165 129 26 10
4300 I guess you could call this a "knight" on the town! Okay, I'll stop. 1.2788 0.04263 165 127 30 8
4301 You literally have to ask for a straw, these days. 1.2787 0.04056 183 141 33 9
4302 Are you saying your turn-ons were “nights” and “shiny armoires” this whole time? 1.2787 0.03981 183 140 35 8
4303 I don’t care that it came with the suit. I am not wearing any chastity belt!” 1.2786 0.04064 201 158 30 13
4304 Yes, I did hear they were predicting hail. 1.2785 0.04478 158 123 26 9
4305 I didn't say I needed rescuing. I said I needed to get laid. 1.2785 0.04741 158 126 20 12
4306 and that’s shining armor, right? 1.2785 0.04478 158 123 26 9
4307 It’s just that you looked taller on Tinder. 1.2785 0.04294 158 121 30 7
4308 I'm just saying, it looked a lot more 'shining' on your profile pic. 1.2785 0.04294 158 121 30 7
4309 Just a quick knight cap! 1.2784 0.03838 176 132 39 5
4310 Not to be too personal, but you seem a little tarnished around the edges. 1.2784 0.04083 176 135 33 8
4311 The night is still young. 1.2784 0.03838 176 132 39 5
4312 As I said on my online dating profile, I take chivalry very seriously. 1.2784 0.04083 176 135 33 8
4313 What? Is there something on my face? 1.2784 0.03921 176 133 37 6
4314 You've been defensive and on guard all evening. Please tell me what's on your mind. 1.2784 0.04083 176 135 33 8
4315 Well, you're the one who wanted a Knight out. 1.2784 0.03832 194 148 38 8
4316 You're no knight and I'm no gentle lady; just taste the wine. 1.2781 0.04113 151 113 34 4
4317 I get that you think it’s manly to not show your feelings in public, but this might be taking it too far. 1.2781 0.04194 169 130 31 8
4318 I never thought I’d meet my knight in shining armor speed dating. 1.2781 0.04277 169 131 29 9
4319 Yes, you are my first date from the Chivalry Isn't Dead dating site. 1.2781 0.04358 169 132 27 10
4320 When I said knight in shining armor, I meant it as a metaphor. 1.2781 0.04277 169 131 29 9
4321 I tend to keep my guard up during the first couple of dates. 1.2781 0.04022 169 128 35 6
4322 So you say you have a night job. 1.2781 0.03933 169 127 37 5
4323 Care for a straw with that? 1.2781 0.03618 187 139 44 4
4324 My armor may have tarnished over the years, but have you looked in the mirror lately?" 1.2781 0.04206 187 147 28 12
4325 I'll let you guess my gender before I raise my visor 1.2781 0.03849 187 142 38 7
4326 The Dating Website said it's a good idea to wear something interesting to break the ice 1.2778 0.03864 180 136 38 6
4327 My dry cleaners gave me the wrong clothes. 1.2778 0.03913 198 153 35 10
4328 Drink up, Prince Charming, I forgot to bring my can opener. 1.2778 0.04131 162 123 33 6
4329 Arthur is running late. His horse is stuck in traffic. 1.2778 0.04022 180 138 34 8
4330 When I requested an older vintage, I was referring to the wine. 1.2778 0.04487 162 127 25 10
4331 Oh, so you meant “Knight” out on the town. 1.2778 0.04022 180 138 34 8
4332 I thought the Chastity belt requirement was only a joke. 1.2778 0.04312 162 125 29 8
4333 Yes, but I identify as a Day... 1.2778 0.04669 144 112 24 8
4334 And as the conversation lagged: "Been a while since I last dated. Feelin' a little rusty, I must admit." 1.2778 0.04131 162 123 33 6
4335 When I said I'd like a night out for a change, this isn't what I meant. 1.2778 0.04487 162 127 25 10
4336 I don't understand, my Tinder profile says "White Knight Type" right at the top. 1.2778 0.03978 198 154 33 11
4337 I guess the dating site did say something about you wanting to come out of your shell... 1.2778 0.04312 162 125 29 8
4338 Oh..... , It's going to be one of those nights, is it? 1.2778 0.04222 162 124 31 7
4339 Well, I dont know why you thought I speaking figuratively. 1.2778 0.04222 162 124 31 7
4340 It was a speed-dating metaphor. 1.2778 0.04131 162 123 33 6
4341 You are not the Knight in Shining Armor I expected. 1.2778 0.04487 162 127 25 10
4342 Online when you said, "your knight in shining armor" I thought you were joking. 1.2775 0.04008 191 148 33 10
4343 Maybe they'll have a straw. 1.2775 0.04209 191 151 27 13
4344 And I'm gonna wear it until women are believed. 1.2775 0.04045 173 132 34 7
4345 True, my profile did say I’m looking for my knight in shining armour. 1.2775 0.04208 173 134 30 9
4346 So I checked the box on the profile that said, 'Champion seeking damsel.' Does that distress you? 1.2775 0.04127 173 133 32 8
4347 Maybe mother is right that we have nothing in common. 1.2775 0.04045 173 132 34 7
4348 Trust me, I look just like my profile picture, only more... chivalrous. 1.2775 0.04045 173 132 34 7
4349 Full disclosure: I'm much better at rescuing than listening. 1.2775 0.04287 173 135 28 10
4350 Thanks for not bringing your lance 1.2775 0.04208 173 134 30 9
4351 You look just like your pictures on Tinder. 1.2775 0.04287 173 135 28 10
4352 Vulnerability might be the key to emotional honesty, but invulnerability is the key to winning. 1.2774 0.03941 155 115 37 3
4353 Used to be, we only needed pepper spray... 1.2774 0.03833 155 114 39 2
4354 Let’s make a toast to conquering our vulnerability issues. 1.2774 0.04148 155 117 33 5
4355 Sure, there’s a lot of standing but they offer a good dental plan. 1.2774 0.04534 155 121 25 9
4356 No, for real, Elizabeth, Arthur had a round table just like this. 1.2774 0.04248 155 118 31 6
4357 I know, people always say I don't look like my profile. 1.2772 0.03887 184 140 37 7
4358 I don't know Lance, I just don't see myself in three years moving out of the city to a castle surrounded by a moat, waiting all day for you to come home from slaying dragons. 1.2771 0.04065 166 126 34 6
4359 Cool armor. And, I'm wearing a merkin! 1.2771 0.04154 166 127 32 7
4360 Want me to ask for a straw? 1.2771 0.04154 166 127 32 7
4361 No shield for the second date? 1.2771 0.04326 166 129 28 9
4362 It's okay to be out these days. 1.2771 0.03786 166 123 40 3
4363 I suppose you don't think much of the sipping straw ban. 1.2770 0.04680 148 116 23 9
4364 I thought you'd feel more comfortable at a table than at the bar. 1.2770 0.04580 148 115 25 8
4365 One more mead and maybe you'll open up a little 1.2768 0.03819 177 133 39 5
4366 It's not exactly shining, is it? 1.2768 0.04063 177 136 33 8
4367 I don't kiss on the first date. 1.2768 0.04063 177 136 33 8
4368 Okay, so maybe I took your personal ad a little too literally... 1.2768 0.04218 177 138 29 10
4369 I haven't been on a date in two years so it didn't matter if it was going out for a night or with a knight 1.2768 0.04142 177 137 31 9
4370 OK! I am ready to talk about your feelings. 1.2768 0.03902 177 134 37 6
4371 This will be a night to remember. 1.2767 0.04177 159 121 32 6
4372 My analyst says I wrap myself in armor! I just don't see it! 1.2767 0.04363 159 123 28 8
4373 I'm gonna get the check. This was better as a metaphor. 1.2767 0.04363 159 123 28 8
4374 IT HAS A STRONG TINNEY AFTER TASTE 1.2766 0.04513 141 108 27 6
4375 Another Bad Night at the Round Table 1.2765 0.04255 170 132 29 9
4376 Really, Judy, still think the chastity belt would have been sufficient. 1.2765 0.04415 170 134 25 11
4377 Mind if I use a straw? 1.2765 0.04002 170 129 35 6
4378 This isn’t what I meant by ‘I want a date night’’ 1.2765 0.04336 170 133 27 10
4379 It's just not working out.... I guess I always expected the armor to be a bit shinier. 1.2765 0.04415 170 134 25 11
4380 Yes, I get what you meant by referring to yourself as "chivalrous" in your profile. 1.2765 0.04172 170 131 31 8
4381 Seriously, I’ve had my flu shot! 1.2765 0.04088 170 130 33 7
4382 I said wine *night*, William. 1.2764 0.03960 199 155 33 11
4383 Yes, I guess I did mention the round tables. 1.2764 0.03695 199 151 41 7
4384 And there'll be no 'jousting' on this date,either. 1.2763 0.04195 152 115 32 5
4385 Sorry, but I'm not looking for my knight in shining armor. 1.2762 0.03925 181 138 36 7
4386 You look just like your picture on eharmony. 1.2762 0.04226 181 142 28 11
4387 This is not what I expected when you said you were bringing back chivalry. 1.2762 0.03925 181 138 36 7
4388 And you say I'm the vulnerable one. 1.2761 0.04289 134 100 31 3
4389 I thought you wanted me to be more chivalrous. 1.2761 0.04015 163 123 35 5
4390 This is the only way I've found to quit drinking that actually works. 1.2761 0.04015 163 123 35 5
4391 Somehow I was expecting shinier armor. 1.2761 0.03822 163 121 39 3
4392 It had been awhile since Rosy was out on a blind date. 1.2761 0.04200 163 125 31 7
4393 Yeah, it's a little awkward, but it cuts down on the catcalls. 1.2761 0.04462 163 128 25 10
4394 The Kavanaugh hearing has sure taken the fun out of blind dates. 1.2761 0.04289 163 126 29 8
4395 I'm gluten-free can you handle that? 1.2761 0.04109 163 124 33 6
4396 That "knight in shining armor" thing set the bar way too high. 1.2761 0.04200 163 125 31 7
4397 You're not at all like your online profile. 1.2761 0.04109 163 124 33 6
4398 Don't be so hard headed... 1.2760 0.04057 192 150 31 11
4399 You should have seen the look on the valet attendant. 1.2759 0.03856 174 131 38 5
4400 This is more than a week end fetish. 1.2759 0.03941 174 132 36 6
4401 I'm sorry -- is it not shining enough for you? 1.2759 0.04536 145 112 26 7
4402 Well sir, I always bring mace on blind dates too. 1.2759 0.04106 174 134 32 8
4403 I'm sure you understand, but us, white men, have been under quite the attack lately. 1.2759 0.04106 174 134 32 8
4404 You're just too defensive. 1.2757 0.04017 185 143 33 9
4405 Do you ever watch "Game of Thrones"? 1.2757 0.03868 185 141 37 7
4406 There's no need for you to get so defensive! 1.2757 0.04017 185 143 33 9
4407 So, Ginger, you don't find the breast plate confining? 1.2757 0.03944 185 142 35 8
4408 A little extra protection is always worth it for the new dating sites. 1.2756 0.04224 156 119 31 6
4409 Aren’t you hot? 1.2756 0.04508 156 122 25 9
4410 Bathroom. Sorry, but I forgot the can opener. 1.2756 0.04224 156 119 31 6
4411 It's easier than having a female chaperone at all of my meetings with women. 1.2756 0.04508 156 122 25 9
4412 'When I said I wanted to meet my knight in shining armor, I didn't mean it literally.' 1.2756 0.04508 156 122 25 9
4413 These days a senator can’t be too careful.” 1.2754 0.04132 167 128 32 7
4414 Sorry, I thought you wanted to see my lance. 1.2754 0.04218 167 129 30 8
4415 What? I'm having a bad hair day. 1.2754 0.04044 167 127 34 6
4416 It's not P.C., but you should use a straw... 1.2754 0.04044 167 127 34 6
4417 I could have sworn you said 'medieval times', and not 'merlot wines' 1.2753 0.03883 178 135 37 6
4418 Not quite what I had in mind when I mentioned that I was looking for my knight in shining armor on the dating site.. 1.2753 0.04043 178 137 33 8
4419 Why yes, I believe the tablecloth is indeed white satin 1.2752 0.04748 149 118 21 10
4420 I don't think we can see eye-to-eye anymore. 1.2751 0.03887 189 145 36 8
4421 I'm guessing varietal WD-40, notes of CLR, Terroir - Jiffy Lube. 1.2751 0.04030 189 147 32 10
4422 I'm all into role-playing, but how am I supposed to drink this? 1.2751 0.03887 189 145 36 8
4423 This is your idea of a night out? 1.2751 0.04030 189 147 32 10
4424 Would it be unchivalrous to ask for a straw? 1.2750 0.04248 160 123 30 7
4425 Yes, virtual reality has changed since your day. 1.2750 0.04339 160 124 28 8
4426 So your recommending the beef au joust again I see. 1.2750 0.03960 160 120 36 4
4427 Um, when I wrote in my profile that I was looking for my knight in shining armor, it was only metaphorical! 1.2750 0.04429 160 125 26 9
4428 I always thought "the Reveal" was an exciting part of the date! 1.2750 0.04154 160 122 32 6
4429 So you're not one of those men who feels liberated by the "me too" movement? 1.2750 0.04517 160 126 24 10
4430 I'm not quite picking up on the metallic aftertaste. 1.2750 0.04154 160 122 32 6
4431 You’re telling me you’re a financially stable, post-fertility, heterosexual female who’s looking for a healthy relationship? Fairytales do come true. 1.2750 0.04154 160 122 32 6
4432 Are you wearing your chastity belt? 1.2750 0.04248 160 123 30 7
4433 I sense you are feeling vulnerable. 1.2750 0.04058 160 121 34 5
4434 You are consistently over-dressed! 1.2749 0.03805 171 128 39 4
4435 The armor in your profile picture looked shinier. 1.2749 0.04151 171 132 31 8
4436 But you're already my knight in shining armour. I just wanted you to open a door for me every once in a while, Sweetie. 1.2749 0.03894 171 129 37 5
4437 OK, let's talk.. 1.2749 0.03894 171 129 37 5
4438 A knight on the town. Why? 1.2747 0.03828 182 138 38 6
4439 So you see, chivalry is not dead! 1.2747 0.04277 182 144 26 12
4440 I think I'll hold out for shinier armor. 1.2746 0.03833 193 148 37 8
4441 When your Tinder profile is literally “knight in shining armor” 1.2745 0.04273 153 117 30 6
4442 How's the swordfish here? 1.2745 0.04172 153 116 32 5
4443 So this is your idea of a blind date? 1.2745 0.04373 153 118 28 7
4444 Your text said nightclub! 1.2745 0.04172 153 116 32 5
4445 Issues with trust? 1.2745 0.03960 153 114 36 3
4446 Like Trump says, it's a scary time for men. We have to protect ourselves from false accusations. 1.2745 0.04470 153 119 26 8
4447 It's not you. The visor's just so last year! 1.2745 0.04373 153 118 28 7
4448 I really misjudged your FaceBook photo. 1.2745 0.04273 153 117 30 6
4449 Not what I meant Harold 1.2744 0.04522 164 130 23 11
4450 I brought protection just in case this date goes somewhere. 1.2744 0.04178 164 126 31 7
4451 I get why you requested a table but I’d prefer a booth 1.2744 0.03994 164 124 35 5
4452 I swiped right because I admire your flexible nature and your potential over a bishop. 1.2744 0.04522 164 130 23 11
4453 Drink that through a straw and I'm leaving. 1.2743 0.04086 175 135 32 8
4454 I was told that you would put on a tough exterior, but this is ridiculous! 1.2743 0.03837 175 132 38 5
4455 I told you that I'm always a little guarded on a first blind date. 1.2743 0.03751 175 131 40 4
4456 Chivalry may not be dead, but this boxed wine is the pits. 1.2742 0.04141 186 146 29 11
4457 I was referring to a different kind of good old days. 1.2741 0.04867 135 106 21 8
4458 Should I ask for a straw? 1.2738 0.04280 168 131 28 9
4459 Finally! 1.2738 0.04111 168 129 32 7
4460 SPF 50? 1.2738 0.04363 168 132 26 10
4461 Well, I did ask the dating app for 'a knight in shining armor'..." 1.2738 0.04363 168 132 26 10
4462 Rats.. I hate that I have to ASK for a straw now. 1.2737 0.03783 179 135 39 5
4463 This isn't what I meant when I said I wanted a knight in shining armor. 1.2737 0.04101 179 139 31 9
4464 Look, Shannon, I thought you wanted me to be more reflective. 1.2737 0.04101 179 139 31 9
4465 Wish they would get here with the straw. 1.2737 0.04177 179 140 29 10
4466 I could be your knight to remember 1.2737 0.03783 179 135 39 5
4467 My therapist says all I need is a can opener. 1.2737 0.03865 179 136 37 6
4468 I'll remove it once I'm sure we never met in high school. 1.2737 0.03865 179 136 37 6
4469 Thanks for insisting on this table. 1.2737 0.03783 179 135 39 5
4470 I'm ready to tell my story. 1.2737 0.03797 190 145 38 7
4471 The finish seems a little metallic. 1.2737 0.04080 190 149 30 11
4472 Under the light, your armor is not so shiny. 1.2736 0.03595 201 152 43 6
4473 All the round tables were reserved. 1.2733 0.04112 150 113 33 4
4474 So you meant "your knight in shining armor" literally? 1.2733 0.04427 150 116 27 7
4475 3-In-One. Why do you ask? 1.2733 0.04427 150 116 27 7
4476 What do you wear when you're not coming right from jousting practice? 1.2733 0.04112 150 113 33 4
4477 No, I said I liked the NIGHTlife in this town 1.2733 0.04577 161 128 22 11
4478 Oh, this old thing? I actually bought it second hand. 1.2733 0.03939 161 121 36 4
4479 Sorry, I have a meeting with my ex afterward. 1.2733 0.04225 161 124 30 7
4480 You really find my name Guinevere to be romantic? 1.2733 0.04037 161 122 34 5
4481 Yes, well, thanks, but I think I'll take a pass on seeing your "undercoating". 1.2733 0.04132 161 123 32 6
4482 #metoo or #metoomuch ? 1.2733 0.03875 172 130 37 5
4483 Straw? What's a straw? 1.2733 0.04447 172 137 23 12
4484 So all you can offer me is a good night? 1.2732 0.03964 183 141 34 8
4485 ‘“I guess my ad asking for a knight in shining armor was too literal.” 1.2732 0.04086 194 153 29 12
4486 Sorry,but sometimes your anxieties are just too obvious. 1.2732 0.03747 205 158 38 9
4487 I told you it was casual Friday. 1.2727 0.04155 165 127 31 7
4488 You can't be too careful--my last blind date stalked me. 1.2727 0.03903 176 134 36 6
4489 We didn't seem to click. I think it was the 500 year age difference. 1.2727 0.03757 187 142 39 6
4490 I was being ironic when my profile mentioned meeting a knight in shining armor... 1.2727 0.03974 165 125 35 5
4491 If this is going to go anywhere, you’ve got to let your guard down. - Raquel Malmberg Brooklyn, NY 1.2727 0.03985 176 135 34 7
4492 This wasn't what I expected when you said "night out." 1.2727 0.03985 176 135 34 7
4493 Damn literal website. 1.2727 0.04347 143 109 29 5
4494 You white males are doing everything possible to protect yourselves! 1.2727 0.04222 176 138 28 10
4495 Well, YOU don't look like your picture too! 1.2727 0.04445 154 120 26 8
4496 Mom, I still love the hat you knitted for me, but, I needed something fiercer to express my current attitude." 1.2727 0.04243 165 128 29 8
4497 So after the vegan, self-driving car debacle, I started this virtual internet jousting company... 1.2727 0.04568 143 111 25 7
4498 I could have sworn it said swipe "right". 1.2727 0.04373 176 140 24 12
4499 No, my decision has nothing to do with your rust 'situation'. 1.2727 0.04066 165 126 33 6
4500 Tell me whether this Merlot makes you feel less defensive. 1.2727 0.03980 187 145 33 9
4501 I knew that I shouldn't have swiped knight. 1.2727 0.04066 165 126 33 6
4502 I thought it would be shining. 1.2727 0.04330 165 129 27 9
4503 Do I really spit that much when I talk? 1.2727 0.04347 143 109 29 5
4504 Well, in your profile you said you had an iron deficiency. 1.2727 0.04674 143 112 23 8
4505 Is a straw too much to ask? 1.2727 0.04249 154 118 30 6
4506 Oh come on, your profile pic can't have been that different. 1.2727 0.03732 176 132 40 4
4507 Jill and Steve have never missed a Two-for-one Knight 1.2727 0.04414 165 130 25 10
4508 You look exactly like your picture on Dating.com 1.2727 0.03974 165 125 35 5
4509 You didn't mention PTSD in your profile. 1.2723 0.03780 202 156 37 9
4510 The waiter said ," This is as close to mead as they can get." 1.2722 0.03765 180 136 39 5
4511 I can see why you might detect metallic overtones in your wine 1.2722 0.04089 169 130 32 7
4512 Sorry I'm late, I couldn't find horse parking. 1.2722 0.03913 169 128 36 5
4513 You look different on Grinder" 1.2722 0.04002 169 129 34 6
4514 Are you sure WD-40 is safe for human consumption? 1.2722 0.04175 169 131 30 8
4515 I was expecting a different "Iron Mike." 1.2722 0.04089 169 130 32 7
4516 I am trying to be vulnerable. I really am. 1.2722 0.04258 169 132 28 9
4517 Don't you just love the shape of this table? 1.2722 0.04002 169 129 34 6
4518 What?! You're posting said I should bring my own protection. 1.2722 0.04273 158 122 29 7
4519 You invited me here for a knightcap? 1.2722 0.04367 158 123 27 8
4520 When your profile said you wore your armor around new people, I thought you were being poetic. 1.2722 0.04273 158 122 29 7
4521 That's not quite what I meant by chivalrous. 1.2722 0.04178 158 121 31 6
4522 I’ve heard of chasity belts, but this is ridiculous.” 1.2722 0.04178 158 121 31 6
4523 I know you don't want to catch my cold but this is going to far. 1.2722 0.04273 158 122 29 7
4524 I do need rescuing, actually, from my current relationship. 1.2722 0.04178 158 121 31 6
4525 For the last time...it’s “Christian Crusader Mingle” not “Christian Mingle”. 1.2722 0.04273 158 122 29 7
4526 Your blazer seems a bit dated. 1.2721 0.04482 147 114 26 7
4527 No, my name is Maida Marion. Sorry for the confusion. 1.2721 0.04482 147 114 26 7
4528 This time, if you order a straw, I'm leaving. 1.2721 0.04485 136 104 27 5
4529 This goes way beyond 'incognito'" 1.2718 0.03657 195 148 41 6
4530 Well, I was tired of dating in my own timeline, so I figured I'd give it a shot." 1.2717 0.04093 184 144 30 10
4531 Is that the Crusader's answer to the hijab? 1.2717 0.04026 173 133 33 7
4532 I'm looking forward to a good knight. 1.2717 0.04347 173 137 25 11
4533 There’s no need to get defensive! 1.2717 0.04026 173 133 33 7
4534 Girls Knight Out 1.2717 0.04424 173 138 23 12
4535 Sorry, but I’m just looking for more than bravery, courtesy, courage, honor and great gallantry towards women 1.2717 0.04269 173 136 27 10
4536 I’m #metoo compliant. 1.2717 0.04026 173 133 33 7
4537 What was that tink? 1.2716 0.04292 162 126 28 8
4538 I DID ask for a knight in shining armor... 1.2716 0.04292 162 126 28 8
4539 Laura suddenly lost her affection to men in armor after that unfortunate incident under the table. 1.2716 0.04381 162 127 26 9
4540 Wine doesn't cause rust, like water does. 1.2716 0.04110 162 124 32 6
4541 You're gonna need a straw! 1.2716 0.04292 162 126 28 8
4542 What’s the matter? Your online profile indicated you were looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.2716 0.03919 162 122 36 4
4543 For the last time – it's not a live lobster. 1.2716 0.04202 162 125 30 7
4544 No. I will NOT ask the waiter for a straw! 1.2716 0.04202 162 125 30 7
4545 And the rust stains? 1.2715 0.04089 151 114 33 4
4546 No, you didn't tell me about your dungeon. 1.2715 0.04089 151 114 33 4
4547 My profile reference to Knight in Shining Armor was not literal. 1.2715 0.04401 151 117 27 7
4548 This is not what I envisioned for my knight out! 1.2715 0.04299 151 116 29 6
4549 But your dating profile indicated that you were looking for the knight of your life. 1.2714 0.04516 140 108 26 6
4550 When I said I wanted a night out, this isn’t what I had in mind. 1.2714 0.03881 199 155 34 10
4551 Is that your hand on my Ni!? 1.2712 0.04201 177 139 28 10
4552 This #METOO movement is getting out of hand. 1.2712 0.04124 177 138 30 9
4553 It is not anyone's fault they didn't have any straws. 1.2712 0.04124 177 138 30 9
4554 Queen moves d-eight to d-one...check and no mate. 1.2712 0.04045 177 137 32 8
4555 You know who else loved round tables? 1.2712 0.04201 177 139 28 10
4556 Who does your hair? 1.2712 0.04045 177 137 32 8
4557 You were the one who wanted to get well oiled. 1.2711 0.04044 166 127 33 6
4558 Will I see you again? 1.2711 0.04044 166 127 33 6
4559 You could have at least worn the shining armor. 1.2711 0.04044 166 127 33 6
4560 So, this is your idea of a night out! 1.2711 0.03953 166 126 35 5
4561 When your profile said you wanted to be some woman's knight in shining armor I thought it was more of an inner reference. 1.2710 0.04323 155 120 28 7
4562 Checkmate in three moves? Call me impressed. 1.2710 0.04419 155 121 26 8
4563 Did you know the straw was invented by the Knights of the Round Table? 1.2710 0.04323 155 120 28 7
4564 Speed-date Knight at the Round Table "So...what do you do for a living?" "I mainly lance a lot." 1.2710 0.04323 155 120 28 7
4565 This is why people stop needing to stop using the word literally in their descriptions of ideal partners on dating apps 1.2710 0.04225 155 119 30 6
4566 You’re right, I’ll be needing a straw. 1.2708 0.04749 144 114 21 9
4567 Is that wine or rust on your new suit? 1.2708 0.03834 192 148 36 8
4568 Sorry, I just always thought your armor would be shinier . . . . 1.2708 0.03905 192 149 34 9
4569 I suppose you’re going to tell me you’ve been cheating on me then. 1.2707 0.04136 181 142 29 10
4570 I thought your armor would be shinier." 1.2707 0.03907 181 139 35 7
4571 Actually, I ordered a night of shining amour 1.2706 0.03982 170 130 34 6
4572 And here I thought that “knight in shining armor” bit was just a metaphor. 1.2706 0.03803 170 128 38 4
4573 On my profile, I requested a knight in "shining" armor. 1.2706 0.03982 170 130 34 6
4574 Well, I’ve been hurt in the past, too, but my therapist has helped me understand that it’s okay to let my guard down once in a while. 1.2704 0.04058 159 121 33 5
4575 This is not what I meant by having a nice night out to dinner 1.2704 0.04609 159 127 21 11
4576 A bit metallic on the finish, don't you think? 1.2704 0.04522 159 126 23 10
4577 I understand the need for anonymity, but I feel like they're going to recognize you anyway. 1.2704 0.03959 159 120 35 4
4578 Yes , the recent push to ban straws does present a problem. 1.2704 0.04609 159 127 21 11
4579 If heavy metal isn't really your thing, I can restructure. 1.2704 0.04058 159 121 33 5
4580 I assume you read the part of my profile where it says I’m looking for my knight in shining armor... 1.2704 0.03918 196 153 33 10
4581 You can take that off--I won't bite! 1.2703 0.04244 148 113 30 5
4582 I thought " I'm your knight in shining armor" was just a figure of speech. 1.2703 0.03851 185 142 36 7
4583 A straw? Jim, this is the last straw. 1.2701 0.03922 174 133 35 6
4584 I decided to be my own knight in shining armor. 1.2701 0.04088 174 135 31 8
4585 I know my profile said I was seeking a knight in shining armor, but this is a bit much. 1.2701 0.04088 174 135 31 8
4586 All the window tables were square. 1.2701 0.04247 174 137 27 10
4587 You said you wanted a knight out together. 1.2701 0.03922 174 133 35 6
4588 A tart finish, maybe, but I wouldn’t say metallic. 1.2701 0.03836 174 132 37 5
4589 You know Mildred, I can’t recall the last time I’ve seen you without your armor. 1.2701 0.03922 174 133 35 6
4590 You never fight fair. 1.2701 0.03749 174 131 39 4
4591 Your profile says you’re into hostile takeovers. 1.2701 0.04168 174 136 29 9
4592 A knight out on the town 1.2699 0.04527 163 130 22 11
4593 When I said to be more chivalrous, I didn't mean this. 1.2699 0.03898 163 123 36 4
4594 I'm...feeling vulnerable lately... 1.2699 0.03994 163 124 34 5
4595 Honey’ I think you are overdressed for the occasion 1.2699 0.04088 163 125 32 6
4596 Just say good knight. 1.2698 0.03723 189 144 39 6
4597 Oh What an evening...What a knight! 1.2698 0.04083 189 149 29 11
4598 You say you feel this need to be protected? 1.2698 0.03943 189 147 33 9
4599 Oh, so THIS is what they meant by women’s knight out. 1.2698 0.03943 189 147 33 9
4600 Even like this, you're not my knight in shining armour 1.2697 0.04172 152 116 31 5
4601 So what time does your Mother's plane get in honey? 1.2697 0.04180 178 140 28 10
4602 I'm really looking forward to the Sir Loin of Beef. 1.2697 0.04026 178 138 32 8
4603 Welcome to the round table ! 1.2697 0.04180 178 140 28 10
4604 Sometimes I feel like I don't even know who you are—or even if you're the same person you were last time. 1.2697 0.04104 178 139 30 9
4605 If I'd known you were being literal, I'd have preferred a knight of the booth. 1.2697 0.04402 178 143 22 13
4606 Takes the incentive out of 'em groping you, huh? 1.2695 0.04374 141 108 28 5
4607 I'd say it has metallic undertones... 1.2695 0.04199 167 130 29 8
4608 Knight time is the right time. 1.2695 0.04023 167 128 33 6
4609 "I thought we agreed you'd take off your armor." 1.2695 0.04023 167 128 33 6
4610 Larry , I feel there's just too strong a barrier between us. 1.2692 0.03888 182 140 35 7
4611 Meeting me at the bar wasn’t enough for you to feel safe? 1.2692 0.03810 182 139 37 6
4612 This will never work. Your politics are simply medieval! 1.2692 0.04202 156 120 30 6
4613 I’m glad you decided to swipe knight. 1.2692 0.03966 182 141 33 8
4614 your profile had more gleam 1.2692 0.03888 182 140 35 7
4615 Hit me, Barbara. 1.2692 0.04299 156 121 28 7
4616 Is this a date or a joust? 1.2692 0.04102 156 119 32 5
4617 This isn't going to work...I need a straw. 1.2690 0.03900 197 154 33 10
4618 I think you should know up front Glenda, I identify as an "armor-sexual" 1.2690 0.04295 171 135 26 10
4619 I need protection from your grimaces. 1.2690 0.03874 171 130 36 5
4620 As a member of the Society of Historical Anachronism, Phillip's hobby has consumed all aspects of his life. 1.2690 0.04048 171 132 32 7
4621 It’s just an expression, Janet: “sartorial armour.” 1.2690 0.03874 171 130 36 5
4622 This is a double blind study. 1.2690 0.04048 171 132 32 7
4623 My friend told me that meeting someone at a wine bar was positively medieval. 1.2690 0.03962 171 131 34 6
4624 …and yet, that’s deceptive as the aromatics are endowed with incredible aromas of dried flowers, beef blood, smoked game, and sweaty but attractive saddle leather-like notes. 1.2690 0.04132 171 133 30 8
4625 I didn't literally mean I wanted a 'knight in shining armor"! 1.2690 0.04214 171 134 28 9
4626 You looked different on the dating site." 1.2690 0.03962 171 131 34 6
4627 This is not what I meant when I asked for a night out. 1.2688 0.03908 186 144 34 8
4628 I'm not what you'd call a damsel in distress. 1.2688 0.03833 186 143 36 7
4629 I take it it's not shiny enough? 1.2688 0.04036 160 122 33 5
4630 It was in Versace's Bargain Basement 1.2688 0.04226 160 124 29 7
4631 So you're and introvert. 1.2688 0.03836 160 120 37 3
4632 It’s not that I’m afraid of intimacy, it just that I’m being cautious. 1.2688 0.04226 160 124 29 7
4633 May I assume you took the subway? 1.2688 0.04036 160 122 33 5
4634 Well, your profile said: 'There's nothing I love like a knight on the town!' 1.2686 0.03986 175 135 33 7
4635 I find your masculinity to be toxic. 1.2686 0.03986 175 135 33 7
4636 You really need to shed some of your inhibitions. 1.2686 0.03731 175 132 39 4
4637 Why am I the one that always has to bring the lube? 1.2685 0.04429 149 116 26 7
4638 But your profile said you like men with protection. 1.2685 0.04429 149 116 26 7
4639 Okay, sir Klanksalot. 1.2685 0.04429 149 116 26 7
4640 On a first date I really like to shine. 1.2684 0.03853 190 147 35 8
4641 No, they don't have straws here. 1.2683 0.04066 164 126 32 6
4642 We'll toast as soon as the waiter brings me a paper straw! 1.2683 0.04157 164 127 30 7
4643 How much for the whole knight 1.2683 0.04503 164 131 22 11
4644 I know what you mean. I’m also sick and tired of people judging me based on my looks. 1.2682 0.04006 179 139 32 8
4645 this is a knightcap 1.2682 0.03846 179 137 36 6
4646 I'm leaving if you give me that steely look again . 1.2682 0.04083 179 140 30 9
4647 I'm doing some undercover work later on this evening. 1.2682 0.04160 179 141 28 10
4648 One more of these and I’m going to have to say good night. 1.2680 0.04544 153 121 23 9
4649 It’s just that.. your armor looked much shinier in your profile.” 1.2680 0.04448 153 120 25 8
4650 Wait, tonight isn't Renaissance night. 1.2680 0.04448 153 120 25 8
4651 All right, all right - you don't have to call me Sir. 1.2680 0.04148 153 117 31 5
4652 But You said 'Tonight's the knight', darling... 1.2680 0.04148 153 117 31 5
4653 Yes, I am happy to be your knight in shining armor, that said, I'd still like to split the check. 1.2679 0.04003 168 129 33 6
4654 Personally, I don't believe chivalry is dead. 1.2679 0.03912 168 128 35 5
4655 And another interesting fact, this visor thingy is actually called a beaver... 1.2679 0.04261 168 132 27 9
4656 A simple condem would have sufficed. 1.2678 0.04169 183 145 27 11
4657 Keira Knightley decided she was never going on a blind date again. 1.2678 0.04022 183 143 31 9
4658 And how’s the jousting working out for you? 1.2678 0.04022 183 143 31 9
4659 I don't see this going anywhere. 1.2678 0.03947 183 142 33 8
4660 I don't know George, sometimes it just seems like you don't have a heart. 1.2678 0.03792 183 140 37 6
4661 Yes, you did promise an exciting knight 1.2678 0.03870 183 141 35 7
4662 I sell auto insurance. 1.2678 0.03870 183 141 35 7
4663 Would it be rude to ask for an eco-friendly metal straw? 1.2675 0.04462 157 124 24 9
4664 Well, that's one way around the Pence Rule. 1.2675 0.04080 157 120 32 5
4665 Everyone says they are looking for their knight in shining armor, but I've found that people lie in their dating profiles. 1.2675 0.04370 157 123 26 8
4666 You look lovely to(k)night. 1.2675 0.03978 157 119 34 4
4667 Honey, I didn’t mean for you take my “date night” request literally. 1.2675 0.04179 157 121 30 6
4668 Wine helps me let my shield down 1.2674 0.03854 172 131 36 5
4669 I just want to be careful. Contraceptives aren't as reliable as you'd think! 1.2674 0.03942 172 132 34 6
4670 I’m leaving you for someone with less rust. 1.2674 0.04106 187 148 28 11
4671 You’ll have to give me your cleaning lady’s number...mine doesn’t do silver 1.2671 0.04485 146 114 25 7
4672 I see. Blacksmithing is your hobby AND your defense mechanism. 1.2671 0.04269 146 112 29 5
4673 Can you really sing Man of La Mancha with that armor on? 1.2671 0.04691 146 116 21 9
4674 I didn't mean it literally. 1.2671 0.04295 161 126 27 8
4675 May I ask how you deal with rust ? 1.2671 0.04203 161 125 29 7
4676 It is disappointing to discover that being a knight in shining armor isn't all that it's cracked up to be. 1.2671 0.04110 161 124 31 6
4677 When you accepted the invitation, I didn't expect you to come by mail. 1.2671 0.04203 161 125 29 7
4678 Let's face it, Mr. Cruz. You need to avoid public gatherings. 1.2670 0.04205 176 139 27 10
4679 I'm not Luke. You're not my father. And nobody thinks this is funny. 1.2670 0.04430 176 142 21 13
4680 Mildred finally met her shite in knighting armor. 1.2670 0.04356 176 141 23 12
4681 Oh please. You do know that everyone lies a little on their pictures. 1.2667 0.04403 150 117 26 7
4682 Emotionally accessible? Would you prefer a knight in tarnished armor? 1.2667 0.04213 180 143 26 11
4683 This is not what I meant when I said that I'm waiting for my knight in shining armor. 1.2667 0.04300 150 116 28 6
4684 Its been Middle Ages since I've had a date 1.2667 0.04045 165 127 32 6
4685 Do you get many nights out? 1.2667 0.04195 150 115 30 5
4686 Sorry I’m late. Just gotta out of Knight class. 1.2667 0.03858 165 125 36 4
4687 Well, it didn't say in your profile how chivalrous you were. 1.2667 0.03827 180 138 36 6
4688 Everyone says I look years younger! 1.2667 0.03986 180 140 32 8
4689 You looked a little more valiant in your Tinder profile. 1.2667 0.03827 180 138 36 6
4690 Your profile said you liked Medieval Literature, so I assumed you were a Professor” 1.2667 0.03745 180 137 38 5
4691 I ordered the swordfish in the stone. 1.2663 0.03852 184 142 35 7
4692 It's not you, really. I just thought the armor would be shinier. 1.2663 0.03852 184 142 35 7
4693 Wrong role-playing, Steve... 1.2663 0.03801 169 128 37 4
4694 I'm trying to strike a balance between appearing gallant and feeling safe around you. 1.2663 0.03982 169 130 33 6
4695 No, I'm not disappointed. It's just that I thought the armor would be 'shinier' 1.2663 0.04069 169 131 31 7
4696 It’s what you get when you use MedevilMatch.com 1.2663 0.03982 169 130 33 6
4697 YourTinder said "wine and amour" 1.2662 0.04226 154 119 29 6
4698 I just don't think we will ever be close. 1.2662 0.04326 154 120 27 7
4699 I don't care what you think, I am not a damsel in distress. 1.2662 0.04226 154 119 29 6
4700 What do you do for fun? 1.2662 0.04226 154 119 29 6
4701 I don’t think this is going to work. You’re so literal. 1.2660 0.03939 203 161 30 12
4702 Is this what you meant by a night out? 1.2660 0.03872 188 146 34 8
4703 Guess we should call it a night. 1.2660 0.03798 188 145 36 7
4704 Yes, my lance is long. But, it’s very thin. 1.2659 0.03922 173 133 34 6
4705 Well yes, I suppose I did write in my on-line profile that I was looking for a "Knight in Shining Armor." 1.2659 0.04171 173 136 28 9
4706 This is not what I meant by a night out on the town 1.2659 0.04329 173 138 24 11
4707 Well Hilda, you finally got yer knight out! 1.2659 0.03922 173 133 34 6
4708 this is a little too oaky for me... I prefer a more steely finish. 1.2658 0.04251 158 123 28 7
4709 I warned you about getting stuck in that outfit. 1.2658 0.04155 158 122 30 6
4710 Charles, this re-enactment thing is starting to interfere with our life. 1.2658 0.04345 158 124 26 8
4711 I love how you embrace your vulnerability. 1.2658 0.04251 158 123 28 7
4712 You are a “Knight to remember”, but not in a good way. 1.2658 0.04437 158 125 24 9
4713 We just don’t share the same circle of friends. 1.2658 0.04251 158 123 28 7
4714 The thing is, I didn't mean it literally 1.2658 0.04345 158 124 26 8
4715 But enough about me, what do you like to do? 1.2658 0.04251 158 123 28 7
4716 To me, it's a bit steely, with undercurrents of rustic heaviness. 1.2658 0.04057 158 121 32 5
4717 Lulu, you’ve been ‘out’ for twenty years, what’ going on? 1.2658 0.04345 158 124 26 8
4718 oh hell no 1.2657 0.04433 143 111 26 6
4719 I think renaissance man relates more to the intellect 1.2655 0.03864 177 136 35 6
4720 Whatever, your armor isn't even shining. 1.2655 0.03947 177 137 33 7
4721 Just to clarify: were you looking for a literal or figurative blind date? 1.2655 0.04183 177 140 27 10
4722 No, seriously: metal straws. They're going to be big. 1.2654 0.03694 162 121 39 2
4723 Yeah, when you asked if I had any protection I thought that might have been more likely but you can never be too careful these days. 1.2654 0.04181 162 126 29 7
4724 So who shines your armor? 1.2654 0.04271 162 127 27 8
4725 Sorry, when you said 'date night,' I thought you meant something else. 1.2654 0.03715 211 165 36 10
4726 It's part of my groping rehabilitation program 1.2653 0.04561 147 116 23 8
4727 I'd love to win the Lancelot Integrity Award, but my immediate goal is to get a straw. 1.2653 0.04561 147 116 23 8
4728 This isn't what I meant by a knight out 1.2653 0.04018 147 111 33 3
4729 This could only be more humiliating if you'd slipped out while I was in the ladies room. Jeffrey? 1.2653 0.04352 147 114 27 6
4730 So it didn't work out with the lip reader, eh? 1.2652 0.03728 181 138 38 5
4731 By chance do you have a straw, my lady? 1.2652 0.03967 181 141 32 8
4732 I'm a stickler for privacy. 1.2652 0.03967 181 141 32 8
4733 My Tinder guy last week rented the same suit. Took me all night to UN-screw him. 1.2652 0.04119 181 143 28 10
4734 But the dating site told you I'm shy. 1.2652 0.03889 181 140 34 7
4735 I don't think that's what our therapist meant by date night. 1.2652 0.03889 181 140 34 7
4736 I know your shy, but if we want this relationship to work, you need to come out of your shell. 1.2652 0.03728 181 138 38 5
4737 So you couldn't really face me." 1.2651 0.04023 166 128 32 6
4738 You misunderstood me. I didn't say I wanted to start having a date knight. 1.2651 0.04287 166 131 26 9
4739 Don't you think,just a rubber would be sufficient? 1.2651 0.04201 166 130 28 8
4740 As your agent, I must tell you that your routine isn't slaying anyone. 1.2649 0.04477 151 119 24 8
4741 You asked for a romantic knight 1.2649 0.04057 185 146 29 10
4742 Not exactly what I had in mind when I asked for a night out. 1.2647 0.04217 170 134 27 9
4743 Have you seen those new wine straws? 1.2647 0.04048 170 132 31 7
4744 The "knight in shining armor" from your profile makes sense now. 1.2645 0.04397 155 122 25 8
4745 Would you happen to have a straw? 1.2645 0.03998 155 118 33 4
4746 Men are utterly medieval these days. 1.2645 0.03998 155 118 33 4
4747 Yeah, I'm just getting back into dating and I might need to learn to let down my defenses a bit. 1.2645 0.04301 155 121 27 7
4748 I try not to kiss anyone on a first date 1.2645 0.03892 155 117 35 3
4749 This isn’t exactly the round table I had in mind. 1.2644 0.03987 174 135 32 7
4750 I am just protecting my feelings. 1.2644 0.03545 174 130 42 2
4751 You've taken blind dating a bit far. Would you like a straw? 1.2644 0.04069 174 136 30 8
4752 ...so this makes saying “milady” somehow less creepy? 1.2644 0.03902 174 134 34 6
4753 I think we should say good night 1.2644 0.03987 174 135 32 7
4754 Your claim that I touched you is categorically false! 1.2642 0.03729 193 149 37 7
4755 I said I was a knight of "A" round table. 1.2642 0.04035 159 122 32 5
4756 I'd recommend the pottage and cockles. 1.2642 0.04035 159 122 32 5
4757 If I get questioned some day, I can honestly say it was an unforgettable knight." 1.2642 0.04035 159 122 32 5
4758 my mother warned me about knights in shining armor. 1.2642 0.04228 159 124 28 7
4759 'Gesundheit!' 1.2642 0.04412 159 126 24 9
4760 I was told you would only go out with a knight in shining armour. 1.2642 0.04228 159 124 28 7
4761 This is the last time I let a millennial anywhere near my Tinder account without a spellchecker. 1.2642 0.04321 159 125 26 8
4762 It keeps me from drinking too much. 1.2640 0.03845 178 137 35 6
4763 Yes, normally it would look ridiculous to drink wine with a straw. 1.2640 0.03762 178 136 37 5
4764 You call that armor shining? 1.2640 0.03762 178 136 37 5
4765 Good you have an interior life! 1.2640 0.03927 178 138 33 7
4766 Not exactly what I meant by a suit and tie. 1.2638 0.04158 163 127 29 7
4767 I meant a man with with an iron will. 1.2638 0.04248 163 128 27 8
4768 This is not what I meant by I would like a night with a glass of wine, 1.2638 0.04158 163 127 29 7
4769 I was expecting your armor to be more shining. 1.2638 0.04336 163 129 25 9
4770 - How was work today? - Same old.....out there slaying the dragon 1.2638 0.03776 163 123 37 3
4771 On your profile you listed that you're seeking a knight in shining armor, and someone who will open up to you. That guy couldn't make it... hope you don't mind I came alone. 1.2638 0.03972 163 125 33 5
4772 You look nothing like the knight in shining armor I requested from the dating service. 1.2638 0.04158 163 127 29 7
4773 Rusty, we can't go on meeting like this 1.2637 0.04172 182 145 26 11
4774 Don't you dare ask for a straw. 1.2635 0.04534 148 117 23 8
4775 How's your Pennzoil? 1.2635 0.04091 167 130 30 7
4776 I believe I said I would like to have a good night at the round table. 1.2635 0.04264 167 132 26 9
4777 Tall, dark , handsome and shy? 1.2635 0.03911 167 128 34 5
4778 I was picturing, you know, more of the Robert Downey Jr. version. 1.2635 0.04179 167 131 28 8
4779 I'm afraid you're just not shiny enough for me. 1.2635 0.04348 167 133 24 10
4780 I get defensive when I drink wine... 1.2635 0.03911 167 128 34 5
4781 Your defensiveness is a red flag. 1.2634 0.03815 186 144 35 7
4782 The embarrassment Leopold felt when he realized Susie meant one "night" stand. 1.2634 0.04109 186 148 27 11
4783 But this is exactly what you said you wanted! 1.2634 0.04109 186 148 27 11
4784 Typically, I walk in for the rescue, but if you want more oomph, I can ride in on a white horse for an extra $500. 1.2632 0.04736 152 123 18 11
4785 I picked this restaurant because your profile said you could only eat at round tables. 1.2632 0.04028 171 133 31 7
4786 I can see you are my knight in shinning armor, but I just don't love you. 1.2632 0.04028 171 133 31 7
4787 Your profile said your armor was shining. 1.2632 0.04195 171 135 27 9
4788 When I said I wanted a night out not what I had in mind 1.2632 0.03941 171 132 33 6
4789 I wish you would let down your guard, be more vulnerable. 1.2632 0.04251 152 118 28 6
4790 So where is your white horse? 1.2632 0.03853 171 131 35 5
4791 No it's not really that tough for men these days. 1.2632 0.03853 171 131 35 5
4792 Maybe, a man with a sense of chilvalry isn't what I need at this stage in my life. 1.2632 0.04028 171 133 31 7
4793 I hope our waiter doesn't take me as literally as my dating app. I said I could eat a horse. 1.2629 0.03883 175 135 34 6
4794 I want you to find the man that murdered my son 1.2629 0.03797 175 134 36 5
4795 You're going to have a rough time eating lobster in that thing. 1.2629 0.03967 175 136 32 7
4796 It was shining more in your photo. 1.2629 0.04129 175 138 28 9
4797 Now you show up? After years of slaving away in the office, climbing corporate ladders, smashing glass ceilings, and surviving hostile takeovers, just call me a "dame under stress." 1.2629 0.03797 175 134 36 5
4798 When you mentioned a date night, this wasn't what I had in mind. 1.2628 0.04466 156 124 23 9
4799 you want me to ask for a straw honey? 1.2628 0.04179 156 121 29 6
4800 What I'm really looking for is a fairy tale romance with a good man. 1.2628 0.04079 156 120 31 5
4801 This date is not heading for a fairytale ending so don't get any ideas. 1.2628 0.04466 156 124 23 9
4802 This would never happen on Jdate... 1.2628 0.03976 156 119 33 4
4803 Take off those stupid glasses. 1.2628 0.03976 156 119 33 4
4804 So few places have kept a dress code beyond shoes and shirt. 1.2628 0.04179 156 121 29 6
4805 Will you get the check, mate? 1.2626 0.03801 198 155 34 9
4806 Just think of it as a different kind of blind date. 1.2626 0.03908 179 139 33 7
4807 This is not my strong suit ... I haven't been dating in middle ages. 1.2626 0.03827 179 138 35 6
4808 How did you find out that I went to Georgetown Prep? 1.2626 0.03908 179 139 33 7
4809 This is not what meant by a "night out" 1.2626 0.03827 179 138 35 6
4810 Well, you certainly are a Knight in Shining Armor. I'm just not sure you're my Knight in Shining Armor. 1.2625 0.04013 160 123 32 5
4811 It used to be you meet a damsel in distress, you rescue her, and it's happily ever after. Nowadays, you gals don't even seem distressed until after you've met me. 1.2625 0.04297 160 126 26 8
4812 Who said Chivalry was dead! 1.2624 0.03750 202 158 35 9
4813 I’ve just never been into the knight in shining armor thing. 1.2623 0.03852 183 142 34 7
4814 Damn, must have left the straws in my other suit. 1.2623 0.03692 183 140 38 5
4815 Not the night out I wished for... 1.2623 0.03852 183 142 34 7
4816 So, no straws, uh? Wasn't aware of that... 1.2623 0.04005 183 144 30 9
4817 the wine is nice 1.2623 0.04079 183 145 28 10
4818 You looked different in your photo. 1.2622 0.03951 164 126 33 5
4819 Your Tinder picture made you seem younger. 1.2622 0.04399 164 131 23 10
4820 No, a joust in the park would not hit the spot. 1.2622 0.03951 164 126 33 5
4821 Medieval England has its enchantments but, as you may have gathered, I fancy myself a renaissance…Wait, is anyone in there? 1.2622 0.03951 164 126 33 5
4822 If you find me defensive, Karen, then you're the one with the problem. 1.2619 0.04157 168 132 28 8
4823 Because, Eileen, the first cut is the deepest. 1.2619 0.04406 168 135 22 11
4824 So... how do you plan to drink that wine exactly? 1.2619 0.03982 168 130 32 6
4825 I've heard the waiters here are pretty aggressive. 1.2619 0.03703 168 127 38 3
4826 When you promised a Christmas celebration, I didn't expect a silent knight. 1.2619 0.04157 168 132 28 8
4827 Yes, I did say I was looking for my own knight in shining armor 1.2619 0.03982 168 130 32 6
4828 I can always tell a first knighter 1.2619 0.04406 168 135 22 11
4829 Aroma of citrus, hint of tobacco and overture of metal 1.2618 0.03671 191 147 38 6
4830 Please, could you ask the waiter for a can opener? 1.2618 0.03818 191 149 34 8
4831 I thought the ad said ‘steed’ dating. 1.2617 0.04301 149 116 27 6
4832 It's gauche, but let me order you a straw. 1.2617 0.04405 149 117 25 7
4833 So this is what you meant when you said that tonight’s the ‘night’... 1.2616 0.04007 172 134 31 7
4834 It's dinner knight! 1.2616 0.04091 172 135 29 8
4835 I think you've lost your shine. 1.2616 0.03834 172 132 35 5
4836 I'd say huile d'armor with notes of lance hickory and toe of frog. 1.2616 0.03744 172 131 37 4
4837 So, you said you were shy, but this is unexpected! 1.2616 0.03921 172 133 33 6
4838 It was really inconsiderate of you to order me my favorite merlot when you know I can’t take off my fucking mask in public, Sharon. 1.2616 0.04173 172 136 27 9
4839 I know we’ve just met Lancelot, but your views seem rather medieval. 1.2616 0.04254 172 137 25 10
4840 It is what your dating profile said you wanted. 1.2616 0.04007 172 134 31 7
4841 If this works out, you'll see I'm quite soft on the inside. 1.2614 0.04123 153 118 30 5
4842 ...but it turns out they meant get back on the horse FIGURATIVELY. 1.2614 0.04123 153 118 30 5
4843 Can we toast to a night on the town? 1.2614 0.03603 176 133 40 3
4844 I specifically wished for 'shining' armor. 1.2614 0.03947 176 137 32 7
4845 I think you took me literally when I said I wanted a good night. 1.2614 0.04263 176 141 24 11
4846 No, it won't help to get a white horse and shine your armor. 1.2614 0.03947 176 137 32 7
4847 No, I don't think they have any straws 1.2614 0.03947 176 137 32 7
4848 It's just another knight out. 1.2611 0.04440 157 125 23 9
4849 I said I don't have emotional armor. 1.2611 0.03889 180 140 33 7
4850 Camelot this is not. 1.2611 0.03968 180 141 31 8
4851 Will you be dining in or out? 1.2609 0.04363 161 128 24 9
4852 What is the vintage? 1.2609 0.04273 161 127 26 8
4853 It won't protect you from recent changes in Gmail. 1.2609 0.04132 184 147 26 11
4854 Ah ... could you get me a straw? 1.2609 0.04182 161 126 28 7
4855 Yes, it is shining and obviously you are as stated in your profile; it's just that.... 1.2609 0.03755 184 142 36 6
4856 Do you really not believe Dr. Christine Blasey Ford? 1.2609 0.04182 161 126 28 7
4857 Good knight to you too. 1.2609 0.03893 161 123 34 4
4858 So, chivalry won't get me everything. 1.2609 0.03893 161 123 34 4
4859 This is not what I had in mind for Date Night. 1.2609 0.04363 161 128 24 9
4860 To tell you the truth, it's been especially dreadful to open up since losing my wife to the plague 1.2609 0.04538 161 130 20 11
4861 I wasn’t sure about the knight in shining armor bit, but your sense of humor slays me. 1.2609 0.03755 184 142 36 6
4862 I'm sorry, Susan, I just feel like you're putting up some kind of armor. 1.2609 0.03992 161 124 32 5
4863 Don't you find this Chianti to have a metallic aftertaste? 1.2606 0.03780 188 146 35 7
4864 Thought your ad read, "Looking for a one night stand." Guess I missed the "K"! 1.2606 0.03780 188 146 35 7
4865 So in your Speed Dating profile this is what you meant when you said you were into chivalry 1.2606 0.03704 188 145 37 6
4866 Your constant excuses not to commit are getting rusty... 1.2606 0.03854 188 147 33 8
4867 A Knight's Tale my ass! 1.2606 0.04203 165 130 27 8
4868 Bold, with berries and a metallic hint. 1.2606 0.04290 165 131 25 9
4869 I believe you might need a straw. 1.2606 0.04203 165 130 27 8
4870 I read on your dating profile that being chivalrous was important to you. I wasn't expecting to this degree.... 1.2606 0.03930 165 127 33 5
4871 You just misunderstood. I said the theme of tonight’s dinner is “Meat is Evil. 1.2606 0.04375 165 132 23 10
4872 If you were going for my sword, I left it at coat check. 1.2606 0.04202 142 109 29 4
4873 Why yes, I do recall you indicated you have a guarded personality in your online profile. 1.2604 0.03728 192 149 36 7
4874 I wished for a night in Bar Harbor not a knight in shining armor!” Phyllis Lambert Sarasota, FL 1.2604 0.04302 169 135 24 10
4875 Turns out you’re not my knight in shining armor. 1.2604 0.03685 169 128 38 3
4876 It was then that Linda hoped chivalry was in fact dead. 1.2604 0.04135 169 133 28 8
4877 Well this could prove to be an interesting night. 1.2604 0.04135 169 133 28 8
4878 You’re not the knight in shining armor I had in mind. 1.2604 0.03871 169 130 34 5
4879 Either your ugly or have something else worth hiding. 1.2604 0.03871 169 130 34 5
4880 You call that shining armor?" 1.2604 0.03871 169 130 34 5
4881 Regrets? Yeah, our one-knight stand that turned me into a lady of the knight. 1.2604 0.04135 169 133 28 8
4882 Make sure the flexible straw isn't plastic. 1.2604 0.04135 169 133 28 8
4883 Pasta al dente all right with you? 1.2604 0.03961 169 131 32 6
4884 Look, Louise - we've all got our bets on you. Mount another horse and get out there. 1.2603 0.04460 146 115 24 7
4885 Linguine with extra oil 1.2603 0.04243 146 113 28 5
4886 So this is what you meant by "a knight out." 1.2602 0.03953 196 156 29 11
4887 So, you’re a knight in shining armor, how do you feel about white satin? 1.2601 0.03987 173 135 31 7
4888 Slings and arrows is a metaphor. 1.2601 0.04152 173 137 27 9
4889 I thought it would be a win win. You get a knight in shining armour and I protect myself as a man. 1.2601 0.03987 173 135 31 7
4890 Maybe this being rescued thing isn't such a good idea. 1.2601 0.03902 173 134 33 6
4891 So... is it your first time on Tinder? 1.2601 0.03987 173 135 31 7
4892 Before we go any further I'm gonna need a straw." 1.2599 0.03927 177 138 32 7
4893 The invitation specified Halloween costume party, are you dressed as Nancy Drew? 1.2599 0.04087 177 140 28 9
4894 Call me old fashioned, Sir Galahad, but I still feel the need to look into your eyes. 1.2597 0.04400 154 122 24 8
4895 You looked taller in your tinder photo. 1.2597 0.04400 154 122 24 8
4896 You looked different in your profile picture. 1.2597 0.04400 154 122 24 8
4897 Open Table indicated the dress requirement as heavy-metal casual. 1.2597 0.03870 181 141 33 7
4898 I'm the good knight of the round table. 1.2595 0.04229 158 124 27 7
4899 Setting the bar for failure? 1.2595 0.04229 158 124 27 7
4900 Not my idea of a night out on the town. 1.2595 0.04132 158 123 29 6
4901 You're dull. 1.2595 0.04323 158 125 25 8
4902 I thought we could work out our differences over a glass of wine,but you seem awfully defensive to me. 1.2595 0.03815 185 144 34 7
4903 I thought some wine might help you open a bit. 1.2595 0.04040 185 147 28 10
4904 I don't know why you're upset. I wore a suit just like you asked. 1.2595 0.03966 185 146 30 9
4905 I'm torn between the swordfish and steelhead trout. 1.2595 0.04455 185 153 16 16
4906 Oh waiter, would you bring me a straw? 1.2595 0.03966 185 146 30 9
4907 Well it’s an unusual diet technique but if it works for you.... 1.2595 0.03494 185 140 42 3
4908 I don't think filet of dragon is on the menu. 1.2595 0.03891 185 145 32 8
4909 Well, I do feel safer since you look just like your profile pic. 1.2593 0.04159 162 127 28 7
4910 You can understand why I am against the plastic straw ban. 1.2593 0.04066 162 126 30 6
4911 I know I said "looking for my knight in shining armor", but maybe you're taking this a little too far. 1.2593 0.03970 162 125 32 5
4912 Kiss on the first date? Why do you ask? 1.2593 0.03970 162 125 32 5
4913 Can we talk about the "Knight in Shining Armor" reference in your personal ad for a second? 1.2593 0.03762 189 147 35 7
4914 Don't frown, Marcella, it isn't appealing. 1.2593 0.03531 189 144 41 4
4915 They have me working the knight shift after this. 1.2593 0.04250 162 128 26 8
4916 Would you like a straw ? 1.2593 0.04339 162 129 24 9
4917 It was OK on our first date, but straws are illegal now. 1.2593 0.04427 162 130 22 10
4918 I firmly believe that relationships should always be open and transparent. 1.2591 0.03712 193 150 36 7
4919 I don't think this is what they mean by a Blind Date 1.2590 0.04092 166 130 29 7
4920 I'm on a quest to meet a nice woman 1.2590 0.03815 166 127 35 4
4921 Trust me, when the kingdom is under attack you'll wish you were wearing this! 1.2590 0.04267 166 132 25 9
4922 Next time, just take a shower. 1.2590 0.04092 166 130 29 7
4923 You look nothing like you photo online. 1.2590 0.04002 166 129 31 6
4924 Are you that embarrassed you ordered the cheap wine, or is your wife here?" 1.2590 0.04092 166 130 29 7
4925 Good night? 1.2590 0.03909 166 128 33 5
4926 I decided the best way to enjoy middle age was by experiencing the middle ages. 1.2590 0.04351 166 133 23 10
4927 Your horse just kicked valet to the curb. 1.2590 0.04373 139 108 26 5
4928 So they say chivalry is dead... 1.2588 0.03851 170 131 34 5
4929 You should have checked first if this is a no-straws restaurant before putting on this ridiculous outfit. 1.2588 0.04028 170 133 30 7
4930 If you're going to go public with your #MeToo story, that's the right outerwear for it. 1.2588 0.04197 170 135 26 9
4931 Really, Harold, I didn’t mean you to take the “shining armor” bit literally. 1.2588 0.03941 170 132 32 6
4932 .. well this time I'm not settling! I want nothing less than the knight in shining armor." Deborah Burnett, Jamaica, NY 1.2588 0.04028 170 133 30 7
4933 so much for online dating 1.2588 0.03941 170 132 32 6
4934 You looked younger in your profile painting 1.2588 0.04197 170 135 26 9
4935 When I said that I sought a knight in shining armour, I didn't mean it literally. 1.2587 0.04833 143 116 17 10
4936 You know Bob, you're right; I have been concealing my true self! 1.2587 0.04406 143 112 25 6
4937 When I said I liked silent nights, I didn't mean the ones in shining armor 1.2586 0.03707 174 133 37 4
4938 At this point I'm looking for someone who doesn't have a lot of armor. 1.2585 0.04106 147 113 30 4
4939 Yes, yes, I agree that chivalry is not dead, but perhaps we can move on to another topic. 1.2585 0.04218 147 114 28 5
4940 It's a flattering offer, but I'm already on too many boards. 1.2584 0.03656 178 136 38 4
4941 Louis C.K. tries his luck at speed dating.. 1.2584 0.04067 178 141 28 9
4942 I know you have a hard time with woman, but aren't you being a little defensive? 1.2584 0.03988 178 140 30 8
4943 Well, I was speaking figuratively, but, who knows? You might do. 1.2584 0.04067 178 141 28 9
4944 I was hoping for someone softer. 1.2584 0.03826 178 138 34 6
4945 Wow. This will surely be a knight to remember! 1.2584 0.03826 178 138 34 6
4946 Okay, so you can sip your wine through the face mask. What are your plans for when the steak dinners arrive? 1.2583 0.04038 151 116 31 4
4947 Even though it's our first date, you don't have to be so stiff. 1.2583 0.04353 151 119 25 7
4948 Yes I did wish for a "knight in shining armor" but it was only a figure of speech. 1.2582 0.03929 182 143 31 8
4949 Except for the shining armor, I think you are dreadfully dull! 1.2582 0.03607 182 139 39 4
4950 #metoo has alerted us to take extra precautions 1.2582 0.03929 182 143 31 8
4951 Mind if I ask how you swipe right? 1.2582 0.03851 182 142 33 7
4952 So your into History dating 1.2581 0.03641 186 143 38 5
4953 I’ve been trying to loosen up lately. 1.2581 0.03973 155 119 32 4
4954 This isn't what i thought you meant when you said you wanted a knight out. 1.2581 0.03720 186 144 36 6
4955 I'll have the soup! 1.2581 0.04179 155 121 28 6
4956 This wasn’t really what I had in mind when I said I was seeking my “knight in shining armor” 1.2581 0.04278 155 122 26 7
4957 EHarmony said you would be a knight in shining armor 1.2581 0.04278 155 122 26 7
4958 Nothing personal,but I think my dating site misinterpreted my meaning of sir galahad 1.2579 0.03962 190 151 29 10
4959 Too be fair, Janice's online dating bio did say she was looking for her knight in shining armor 1.2579 0.04391 159 127 23 9
4960 When you said this would be a night to remember, I had something else in mind. 1.2579 0.04205 159 125 27 7
4961 Chivalry isn't dead it just smells funny, these suits are hard to clean 1.2579 0.04205 159 125 27 7
4962 I’m pretty sure “the visor is the window to the soul” is not a thing. 1.2579 0.04299 159 126 25 8
4963 The Dragon Roll is to Die for.” 1.2579 0.04110 159 124 29 6
4964 So I take it you’re into jousting? 1.2577 0.03622 194 150 38 6
4965 A blind date with an errant knight. 1.2577 0.03949 163 126 32 5
4966 I find it has a rather metal finish. 1.2577 0.04044 163 127 30 6
4967 The dating service took me too literally. 1.2577 0.03949 163 126 32 5
4968 Your armor could be shinier. 1.2577 0.03752 163 124 36 3
4969 Are you on a night errand? 1.2577 0.04044 163 127 30 6
4970 I don't know why I'm suprised. You did write in your profile that you're an old-fashioned type of guy... 1.2577 0.03949 163 126 32 5
4971 I guess the profile description 'knight in shining armor' was too good to be believed. 1.2577 0.04227 163 129 26 8
4972 I'm looking for a damsel in distress, not a damsel under stress. 1.2577 0.04227 163 129 26 8
4973 Chocolate highlights, with a hint of stainless steel. 1.2576 0.04385 132 102 26 4
4974 Bart, wouldn’t a robe be more fitting on the bench? 1.2576 0.03852 198 157 31 10
4975 I did say I was looking for a knight in shining armour. 1.2575 0.03889 167 129 33 5
4976 I'm getting sour grapes with a hint of rust. 1.2575 0.04158 167 132 27 8
4977 I call it Kavanaugh allegation armor 1.2575 0.03795 167 128 35 4
4978 Yeah...she was a real chink in my armor...so to speak 1.2575 0.03889 167 129 33 5
4979 You need to learn the difference between chauvinist and chivalrous. 1.2575 0.04070 167 131 29 7
4980 We're married 10 years now and I still don't know what you look like. 1.2575 0.04244 167 133 25 9
4981 At least you could raise your visor! 1.2575 0.03600 167 126 39 2
4982 Shoulder pads went out in the Forties. 1.2575 0.03889 167 129 33 5
4983 I distinctly remember you saying you wanted a knight out on the town. 1.2575 0.04244 167 133 25 9
4984 This is what you meant when you said I deserved a night out? 1.2575 0.03889 167 129 33 5
4985 Good luck, quitting isn’t easy. 1.2573 0.03741 171 131 36 4
4986 Oh - you like armoires? 1.2573 0.04007 171 134 30 7
4987 So, why couldn't you come as the damsel? 1.2573 0.04175 171 136 26 9
4988 I’m sure this will be one knight to remember! 1.2573 0.03741 171 131 36 4
4989 I'll come out when you agree to be civil 1.2573 0.03832 171 132 34 5
4990 No, I don't polish armour! 1.2573 0.04337 171 138 22 11
4991 You can't pin anything on me 1.2573 0.03741 171 131 36 4
4992 Believe me, no one'll notice the straw! 1.2573 0.04092 171 135 28 8
4993 If I was looking for a knight in shining armor, I would have put that in my dating profile. 1.2573 0.03749 206 163 33 10
4994 My sister suggested I wear a suit on first dates. 1.2571 0.03947 175 137 31 7
4995 Oh, just another metaphor!! 1.2571 0.03598 175 133 39 3
4996 So you're out questing for Guinevere? Wrong table, Lance. 1.2571 0.03863 175 136 33 6
4997 It's a bit awkward, but fortunately, I brought my can opener. 1.2570 0.04047 179 142 28 9
4998 Mark, when you said you believed in chivalry, I thought you meant something else, entirely. 1.2570 0.04047 179 142 28 9
4999 And what would my little skurvy knave like for dinner? 1.2570 0.03724 179 138 36 5
5000 By 'battle,' I just meant to expect crowded shops. 1.2569 0.04489 144 114 23 7
5001 Ellen found the "interest in medieval era" listed on her online date's profile was in a much more literal sense than previously anticipated. 1.2569 0.04379 144 113 25 6
5002 Forsooth Sir, thy armor is not shining as displayed on thy website. 1.2568 0.03754 183 142 35 6
5003 You can't be too careful 1.2568 0.03754 183 142 35 6
5004 So you're fighting for this relationship! 1.2568 0.03590 183 140 39 4
5005 I did not touch you 36 years ago! 1.2568 0.03833 183 143 33 7
5006 And my occupation is the Shiny Object Trump pulls out whenever he wants to distract the world. 1.2568 0.04193 148 115 28 5
5007 I don't care if you are a knight-errant, you still have to spend the holidays with my family. 1.2567 0.03855 187 147 32 8
5008 I want to be a judge one day; I have to protect myself. 1.2566 0.04226 152 119 27 6
5009 Yeah, I swiped right because it looked like you're not always getting kidnapped, and you don't know any dragons. Fair maidens are so high-maintenance, you know? 1.2566 0.04226 152 119 27 6
5010 In the end I suppose the Crusades were just a convenient excuse. 1.2566 0.04226 152 119 27 6
5011 Your dating profile said you were a knight in shining armor, I don't know what I expected 1.2566 0.03791 152 115 35 2
5012 You don't share easily, do you? 1.2566 0.04428 152 121 23 8
5013 I'm sorry, Leonard, but your shining armor oxidated twenty years ago. 1.2566 0.04226 152 119 27 6
5014 I was talking figuratively 1.2565 0.04013 191 153 27 11
5015 I should be the one wearing that. 1.2564 0.04349 156 124 24 8
5016 No. I won’t get you a straw. 1.2564 0.03845 156 119 34 3
5017 Well, I suppose my mother always told me to find a knight in shining armor. 1.2564 0.03606 195 151 38 6
5018 Everyone just says “good night.” Never “good knight.” 1.2564 0.03951 156 120 32 4
5019 It’s freezing in here! 1.2564 0.03951 156 120 32 4
5020 Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, You're all the same ." " I mean, why is this knight different from all other knights. 1.2563 0.04366 160 128 23 9
5021 On the bright side, you don't need silverware. 1.2563 0.04182 160 126 27 7
5022 Do you always take personals ads so literally? 1.2563 0.04275 160 127 25 8
5023 I still don't feel safe, and it's hot in here. 1.2563 0.03890 160 123 33 4
5024 Not the knight I was expecting. 1.2563 0.04182 160 126 27 7
5025 You were right, the round table does fit the room well. 1.2561 0.03928 164 127 32 5
5026 Yes, my bio did say seeking male. 1.2561 0.04204 164 130 26 8
5027 My fashion sense isn't the only thing that's rusty 1.2561 0.04204 164 130 26 8
5028 Do you think they'd judge me if I asked for a straw? 1.2560 0.04221 168 134 25 9
5029 No, I wouldn’t quite describe it as a feeling of “distress.” 1.2560 0.03869 168 130 33 5
5030 He probably didn't mean my round table, but I'm glad for the company 1.2560 0.04221 168 134 25 9
5031 The problem with dating apps is that your request can be taken way too literally. 1.2560 0.03960 168 131 31 6
5032 We have to order quickly. I double parked my white horse. 1.2560 0.03776 168 129 35 4
5033 How was your day? 1.2560 0.03869 168 130 33 5
5034 This your first time arguing before the Kavanaugh court, Chrissy? 1.2560 0.04387 168 136 21 11
5035 When you said “date night,” I thought you had something else in mind. 1.2560 0.04136 168 133 27 8
5036 Well at least your finality showing your mettle 1.2558 0.04071 172 136 28 8
5037 I would've figured you for more of a Rusty Nail kind of guy. 1.2558 0.04235 172 138 24 10
5038 I apologize, this is not what I meant when I said I would do anything for a knight in shining armor. 1.2557 0.03927 176 138 31 7
5039 Will you get rusty if I spill my wine? 1.2557 0.04395 176 144 19 13
5040 I' thought everyone knew knights errant were celibate. 1.2557 0.04009 176 139 29 8
5041 What do you mean my online photo looked different? 1.2557 0.03927 176 138 31 7
5042 Do you find a rusty metal finish in the Merlot? 1.2557 0.03843 176 137 33 6
5043 What do you mean it wasn't a great year? 1.2557 0.03927 176 138 31 7
5044 I’m automatically attracted to beautiful women. It’s like a magnet. 1.2557 0.04009 176 139 29 8
5045 No,I didn't say,"I would joust. Love to meet you." 1.2554 0.03815 184 144 33 7
5046 I wrote on my profile that I wanted a knight in shining armor, but I I don't think we can ever get really close. 1.2554 0.03815 184 144 33 7
5047 This must be your first blind date! 1.2554 0.03655 184 142 37 5
5048 No, I don’t want to play footsy. 1.2554 0.03655 184 142 37 5
5049 I noticed your profile said 'Looking for my Knight in Shining Armor.' 1.2553 0.03607 188 145 38 5
5050 I've heard of blind dates, but this is ridiculous. 1.2553 0.03762 188 147 34 7
5051 I'm taking precautions against identity theft... 1.2552 0.03561 192 148 39 5
5052 Sally was offended by Brett’s off color references to jousting 1.2550 0.04168 149 116 28 5
5053 I said I wanted a glass of wine at night, not a knight with a glass of wine. 1.2550 0.04380 149 118 24 7
5054 I wouldn't worry about red wine stains. 1.2550 0.04058 149 115 30 4
5055 Shirley knew she had turned up late for their date, but she hadn't realised a whole period of history had passed! 1.2550 0.04275 149 117 26 6
5056 I appreciate your wanting to have safe sex but I find this idea quite abrasive. 1.2550 0.03883 200 160 29 11
5057 So.....Knight to bar 1..... 1.2549 0.04303 153 121 25 7
5058 George isnt it a bit early for halloween?? 1.2549 0.04202 153 120 27 6
5059 You do understand what a woman means when she says she's looking for a "Knight in Shining Armor"? 1.2549 0.04402 153 122 23 8
5060 Do you joust here very often? 1.2549 0.04202 153 120 27 6
5061 So... am I gonna joust dat ass or what? 1.2549 0.04498 153 123 21 9
5062 I was looking for someone unguarded. 1.2549 0.04202 153 120 27 6
5063 Not what I had in mind when your online profile said 'I promise you a great night' 1.2548 0.03824 157 120 34 3
5064 I know its only our second date, but at some point you're going to need to open up and be a little emotionally vulnerable with me. 1.2548 0.04229 157 124 26 7
5065 Well, you wanted the knight on the town! 1.2547 0.03418 212 164 42 6
5066 A simple diet would work just as well 1.2547 0.03869 161 124 33 4
5067 Did your profile not say you were looking for some chivalry? 1.2547 0.03968 161 125 31 5
5068 I should have listened when they told me to be careful of what you wish for. 1.2547 0.04065 161 126 29 6
5069 I just love vintage stuff. 1.2547 0.03663 161 122 37 2
5070 you wanted a round table conference to discuss the divorce settlement 1.2547 0.04159 161 127 27 7
5071 Is that your Mike Pence costume for Halloween? 1.2545 0.04092 165 130 28 7
5072 It's critical that we drop our masks in order to move forward 1.2545 0.04001 165 129 30 6
5073 Ok, use your straw, but I'm not visor-sizing your food again. 1.2545 0.04001 165 129 30 6
5074 Compared to my ex you don't seem guarded at all. 1.2544 0.03661 169 129 37 3
5075 Interesting. So, you feel your armor goes better with a pinot noir than say a cabernet? 1.2544 0.03939 169 132 31 6
5076 I suppose next you'll presume that I am your Guinevere. 1.2544 0.03661 169 129 37 3
5077 I can't hear you but let's see if I can read your lips! 1.2544 0.03939 169 132 31 6
5078 I thought the knight in shining armor role play would be a little more exciting. 1.2544 0.04028 169 133 29 7
5079 I wasn't being literal when I said Knight in shining armor in my ad. 1.2544 0.04028 169 133 29 7
5080 And I thought the profile pic was clicked in jest ! 1.2543 0.04050 173 137 28 8
5081 Sorry I'm late. Speed is not my forte. 1.2543 0.03966 173 136 30 7
5082 And yeah, then I stuck a lance in his gut. 1.2543 0.03966 173 136 30 7
5083 Armor or amour - your choice, sir" 1.2543 0.03793 173 134 34 5
5084 I should warn you, I recently ended a 40 day relationship with my ex-liege and I'm feeling pretty vulnerable. 1.2543 0.03703 173 133 36 4
5085 Patience, George. They've sent someone to the deli next door to get some straws. 1.2543 0.03793 173 134 34 5
5086 I had a therapist like your’s once too. 1.2542 0.03907 177 139 31 7
5087 My last date thought chivalry was dead 1.2542 0.04068 177 141 27 9
5088 Stop complaining.........I told you they outlawed plastic straws! 1.2542 0.03653 177 136 37 4
5089 I thought your "I will be your knight in shining armor" line in your profile was just a romantic allegory. 1.2542 0.03907 177 139 31 7
5090 I promised you a Knight out you’d never forget! 1.2542 0.03739 177 137 35 5
5091 Somehow I expected my knight to have shinier armor 1.2542 0.04068 177 141 27 9
5092 Tonight, the only thing I want to fight over is the check. 1.2542 0.03907 177 139 31 7
5093 You said to wear something appropriate for knight-time. 1.2542 0.03824 177 138 33 6
5094 You know, Lance, Gwen really gets around Ye Old Round Table if you know what I mean. 1.2542 0.04068 177 141 27 9
5095 The wine’s OK, but I wish I’d ordered a Chivalrous Regal. 1.2541 0.03770 181 141 34 6
5096 Do these pants make my ass look fat? 1.2541 0.04007 181 144 28 9
5097 I'm trying to prevent a #MeToo moment. 1.2541 0.04157 181 146 24 11
5098 Are you Japanese? Or did you really mean: "lusty'" ? 1.2541 0.04022 185 148 27 10
5099 How is this knight different from all other knights? On this knight we drink Cabernet. 1.2541 0.03638 185 143 37 5
5100 You're just pissed because for once, you're the one who's underdressed 1.2541 0.03638 185 143 37 5
5101 I feel like you are so emotionally distant. I wish you felt comfortable enough with me to take off your armour. 1.2541 0.03873 185 146 31 8
5102 So-you're asking me to pledge my troth? 1.2540 0.03819 189 149 32 8
5103 You seem rather well defended yourself. 1.2538 0.03574 197 153 38 6
5104 Jay, you really need to trust more. 1.2535 0.04406 142 112 24 6
5105 I'm probably going to drink more than you 1.2535 0.04627 142 114 20 8
5106 In your profile you mentioned you were looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.2534 0.04642 146 118 19 9
5107 Well, yes...I DO tend to be a little defensive on a first date...however did you guess?" 1.2534 0.04216 146 114 27 5
5108 But I need a straw. 1.2533 0.04250 150 118 26 6
5109 I don't trust a knight in shining armor because his metal has never been tested. 1.2532 0.04278 154 122 25 7
5110 It looked a lot more “shining” on Tindr. 1.2532 0.04178 154 121 27 6
5111 This is just between you and me, so keep your trap shut. 1.2532 0.04109 158 124 28 6
5112 I didn’t think this would be a literal blind date. 1.2532 0.04009 158 123 30 5
5113 When I said in my profile I wanted a knight in shining armor, this is NOT what I meant. 1.2531 0.03947 162 126 31 5
5114 Geez, Linda. I thought I was guarded. 1.2531 0.03643 162 123 37 2
5115 Tastes a bit metallic, don't you think? 1.2531 0.03947 162 126 31 5
5116 You're giving me a "knight " to remember! 1.2531 0.03947 162 126 31 5
5117 The merlo has a nice nutty flavor with a hint of tin 1.2531 0.04406 162 131 21 10
5118 You can't take chances with online dating. 1.2531 0.04043 162 127 29 6
5119 Don't judge the knight by his armor, judge the night by its amour. 1.2531 0.04318 162 130 23 9
5120 So the Samba is out. 1.2531 0.04043 162 127 29 6
5121 I'll need a straw but make sure it's not plastic. 1.2530 0.04159 166 132 26 8
5122 I used to be a pumpkin. 1.2530 0.04159 166 132 26 8
5123 I think it's a bit too metallic: how about you? 1.2530 0.04159 166 132 26 8
5124 No, you may not have a straw. 1.2530 0.03791 166 128 34 4
5125 Yeah, but what happens when we kiss? 1.2530 0.03979 166 130 30 6
5126 Really? That’s how you want my parents to meet you? 1.2529 0.03829 170 132 33 5
5127 I think sitting at a round table is a bit much. 1.2529 0.03919 170 133 31 6
5128 No, not that Kavanaugh, but I can’t be too careful these days. 1.2529 0.03919 170 133 31 6
5129 Do you resemble your mother or your father? 1.2529 0.03829 170 132 33 5
5130 I may be your knight in shining armor, but it's still separate checks, right? 1.2529 0.04007 170 134 29 7
5131 Sorry, I didn't know you were going to dress up. 1.2529 0.03919 170 133 31 6
5132 No dear, this in not what i meant about a date night. 1.2529 0.03594 174 133 38 3
5133 You look nothing like your Tinder photo. 1.2529 0.04191 174 140 24 10
5134 And then she told me my armour wasn't shiny enough. 1.2529 0.03946 174 137 30 7
5135 Can you believe the valet would not park my horse? 1.2529 0.03861 174 136 32 6
5136 Well,I suppose I am a little defensive after my last Tinder experience. 1.2528 0.03888 178 140 31 7
5137 Well, you didn't say you wanted an EVENING out, did you, Karen? 1.2528 0.03721 178 138 35 5
5138 When I said you are my knight in shining armor, I meant it as a metaphor. 1.2528 0.03805 178 139 33 6
5139 You are overly emphasizing the Knight in shining armor tonight. 1.2527 0.03752 182 142 34 6
5140 So you're saying chivalry is not dead? 1.2527 0.03832 182 143 32 7
5141 Tonight, we'll just have to be a knight and a mid-level sales executive at the round table. 1.2527 0.03752 182 142 34 6
5142 So basically, you’ll get chivalry back, and I’ll get to impale my enemies with a giant stick. 1.2527 0.03701 186 145 35 6
5143 I assumed it was just your “Tinder” look. 1.2526 0.03801 190 150 32 8
5144 Is this your version of a burka? 1.2526 0.04015 190 153 26 11
5145 When I said that I was in search of my knight in shining armor I was using a figure of speech 1.2526 0.04090 194 158 23 13
5146 Why do I think that suit protects you, not me? 1.2518 0.04462 139 110 23 6
5147 This wasn't exactly my idea of a night on the town ! 1.2517 0.04265 143 112 26 5
5148 You're going to say I am being silly, but I can't help feeling that you are shutting me out. 1.2517 0.04379 143 113 24 6
5149 How was your date last night Susan? Well the food was divine but the guy was so... guarded. 1.2517 0.04148 143 111 28 4
5150 Of course I believe women! 1.2517 0.04300 147 116 25 6
5151 I thought you said you wanted a knight out? 1.2517 0.03784 151 115 34 2
5152 This is not what I meant when I said 'chivalry is dead'! 1.2517 0.04429 151 121 22 8
5153 I think you're beginning to take this Crossfit stuff a little too far. 1.2516 0.04351 155 124 23 8
5154 Darling, I'm here to parley, not partay. 1.2516 0.04254 155 123 25 7
5155 Arthur, when I said we should dress up and have a night on the town, this isn't exactly what I had in mind. 1.2516 0.04154 155 122 27 6
5156 But your profile said "looking for a knight in shining armour" 1.2516 0.04154 155 122 27 6
5157 I told you, I’m not ordering the swordfish! 1.2516 0.04254 155 123 25 7
5158 That's a fine red wine and you want a straw? 1.2516 0.04446 155 125 21 9
5159 Nice try, Stormy, but you’ll never get Pence alone. 1.2516 0.04368 159 128 22 9
5160 I don't wan to be caught in the 'me too' movement of the future 1.2516 0.04086 159 125 28 6
5161 Amour??? 1.2516 0.04086 159 125 28 6
5162 So Mike, where's your wife? 1.2516 0.04368 159 128 22 9
5163 So because I asked you to pay for the Uber, now chivalry is dead again? 1.2516 0.04086 159 125 28 6
5164 My therapist says it's a practical response to the rough and tumble dating world." 1.2516 0.04086 159 125 28 6
5165 Is this outfit too revealing? 1.2516 0.04276 159 127 24 8
5166 Seems a little overly dramatic way to go on the wagon,Harry 1.2515 0.03925 163 127 31 5
5167 The invitation said, “Formal wear” – not Farberware! 1.2515 0.04021 163 128 29 6
5168 I have a feeling that I I may have overdressed... 1.2515 0.03925 163 127 31 5
5169 I've been waiting forever. I thought you were dead. 1.2515 0.04294 163 131 23 9
5170 Is yours prop wine too? 1.2515 0.04021 163 128 29 6
5171 This @MeToo stuff is playing havoc with my wardrobe 1.2515 0.04021 163 128 29 6
5172 I am in the mood for a haunch of stag. 1.2515 0.04021 163 128 29 6
5173 Your profile picture shows Gold Armor! You came wearing tin?" 1.2515 0.04048 167 132 28 7
5174 That’s the last time I use the “It’s too good to be true” dating app 1.2515 0.03958 167 131 30 6
5175 I thought you wanted a more exciting knightlife? 1.2515 0.04137 167 133 26 8
5176 Leave it to you to find a spot I missed. 1.2515 0.03958 167 131 30 6
5177 Tom had taken 'Don Amore' as a directive. 1.2515 0.04308 167 135 22 10
5178 It's the same vintage as you! 1.2515 0.03866 167 130 32 5
5179 Yes I wrote "looking for my knight in shining armor" on my profile but I didn't mean it literally! 1.2515 0.04137 167 133 26 8
5180 I just don't see the big fuss about 'Girl's Knight Out'! 1.2515 0.04071 171 136 27 8
5181 This should loosen you up! 1.2515 0.03624 171 131 37 3
5182 When I said I was looking for a Knight in shining armor I did not mean it literaly. 1.2515 0.03809 171 133 33 5
5183 Let’s take this back to your place — I’m going to get all medieval on you. 1.2515 0.03986 171 135 29 7
5184 Well, I suppose this is an adequate start on controlling your drinking. 1.2515 0.03718 171 132 35 4
5185 Don't you have a war somewhere that you're supposed to be fighting. 1.2515 0.04071 171 136 27 8
5186 No. No. No. I am not defensive tonight - you are. 1.2514 0.04009 175 139 28 8
5187 If you pull sword out to cut your steak, I am out of here. 1.2514 0.04090 175 140 26 9
5188 So this Knight in Shining Armor dating app is a real thing. 1.2514 0.03926 175 138 30 7
5189 I practice safe sex and I also practice safe intercourse. 1.2514 0.03926 175 138 30 7
5190 Oh this? Sorry, it’s jist that I recently got out of a really, really, really long relationship. 1.2514 0.03787 179 140 33 6
5191 I hope this place hasn't imposed a plastic straw ban. 1.2514 0.03653 183 142 36 5
5192 I wasn't being literal when I asked for a knight in shining armor 1.2514 0.03891 183 145 30 8
5193 When you suggested a night on the town, this isn't what I had in mind. 1.2514 0.03734 183 143 34 6
5194 I feel like there's a wall between us. 1.2514 0.03968 183 146 28 9
5195 The “Knight in Shining Armor” line was a metaphor. 1.2513 0.03836 187 148 31 8
5196 Haven't you heard? We don't need you anymore. 1.2513 0.03802 195 155 31 9
5197 An optional blind date was added to our tournament. 1.2500 0.04403 152 122 22 8
5198 If you never lift your visor on the first date, how are you gonna drink that wine? 1.2500 0.04133 172 138 25 9
5199 I should add some extra details on my online dating profile 1.2500 0.03762 160 123 34 3
5200 I like being up front on first dates" 1.2500 0.04115 168 134 26 8
5201 Her profile said she wanted to be treated like a princess, so I forced her to marry a complete stranger in order to make an alliance with Norway. 1.2500 0.04357 164 133 21 10
5202 I tried wiring my mouth shut, but that looks easier. 1.2500 0.04484 148 119 21 8
5203 Well, I did I say that I was your knight in shining armor. 1.2500 0.03846 168 131 32 5
5204 Sorry, it was the last suit I had left. 1.2500 0.03846 168 131 32 5
5205 Can I trust you to stay tight-lipped? 1.2500 0.04029 156 122 29 5
5206 That's not what I meant by 'date night'. 1.2500 0.03929 180 143 29 8
5207 Janet was relieved to realize they had both accidentally worn the same outfit two dates in a row. 1.2500 0.04501 152 123 20 9
5208 So you'll notice I held the door open for you when we walked in... 1.2500 0.04381 148 118 23 7
5209 I hope it's not me. This wine has a metallic taste. 1.2500 0.03511 172 131 39 2
5210 Oh, my. When Betsy offered to set me up with a guy who could be my knight in shining armor, I didn't think she was being literal. 1.2500 0.04284 168 136 22 10
5211 I'm really getting into my job at the Canterbury Tales theme park 1.2500 0.04023 184 148 26 10
5212 This is taking "my knight in shining armor" too far. 1.2500 0.04130 156 123 27 6
5213 You never talk when we dine out! 1.2500 0.04638 136 109 20 7
5214 I didn't literally mean you needed to be more chivalrous. 1.2500 0.03904 164 128 31 5
5215 Fine, then I'll ask for a straw 1.2500 0.03938 168 132 30 6
5216 When Denise asked if I wanted to meet my knight in shining armor I thought she meant it metaphorically. 1.2500 0.03716 184 144 34 6
5217 I thought this was supposed to be a blind date. 1.2500 0.03762 160 123 34 3
5218 Well this is certainly a knight to remember. 1.2500 0.03925 156 121 31 4
5219 "I have a beekeeper suit for Bumble dates." 1.2500 0.04433 140 111 23 6
5220 Well, I do admit, I am looking for a traditional man. 1.2500 0.03938 168 132 30 6
5221 When I said I was looking for my knight in shining armor, I didn’t think Match.com would take me so literally! 1.2500 0.03846 168 131 32 5
5222 I sense a certain lack of commitment. 1.2500 0.03846 168 131 32 5
5223 So tell me Mr. Knight in Shining Armor, Is this a Blind Date? Or can you actually see through that grating in front of your eyes? 1.2500 0.03873 184 146 30 8
5224 I wasn’t being literal about arriving in shining armor. 1.2500 0.04166 148 116 27 5
5225 I won't do it, order your own straw! 1.2500 0.04484 148 119 21 8
5226 I heard that men of privilege are being attacked these days so I thought I'd take some precautions. 1.2500 0.04029 156 122 29 5
5227 Silent Knight 1.2500 0.03999 164 129 29 6
5228 Wonderful weather we're having. 1.2500 0.03850 180 142 31 7
5229 Well, it was late December back in '63 1.2500 0.03766 192 152 32 8
5230 So YOU'RE my date knight? 1.2500 0.03879 172 135 31 6
5231 a Chivalrous blind date 1.2500 0.03649 176 136 36 4
5232 Your boardroom experience is impressive, but you should expect the politics at the Renaissance Faire to be just as cutthroat. 1.2500 0.04303 152 121 24 7
5233 James Covington is my alias. My real name is Sean Spicer. 1.2500 0.03965 172 136 29 7
5234 The nose is bit metallic,don't you think? 1.2500 0.04303 152 121 24 7
5235 I'm living proof chivalry isn't dead, m'lady. 1.2500 0.03965 160 125 30 5
5236 Chivalry is dead 1.2500 0.03571 196 153 37 6
5237 Gladys couldn't help but think that maybe knight-in-shining-armor-.com wasn't such a good idea. 1.2500 0.03795 184 145 32 7
5238 You're either very chivalrous or I'm being catfished again. 1.2500 0.03850 180 142 31 7
5239 That picture was pretty old. 1.2500 0.04063 160 126 28 6
5240 Not exactly what I was expecting when you invited me for a night out. 1.2500 0.04027 168 133 28 7
5241 Sometimes I see them as particles, sometimes as waves. 1.2500 0.04570 144 116 20 8
5242 Maybe I should have asked for a straw. 1.2500 0.04229 156 124 25 7
5243 You looked different in your OKCupid ad. 1.2500 0.03949 184 147 28 9
5244 Knowing his wife to be a wine snob, Bob was ready for "The War of the Rosés". 1.2500 0.04352 144 114 24 6
5245 Lets do the Cab now, and worry about the Dragon later, okay? 1.2500 0.04159 160 127 26 7
5246 Try having a real good night means whatever you want it to mean. 1.2488 0.03581 201 158 36 7
5247 Am I too offensive or too defensive? 1.2487 0.03768 197 157 31 9
5248 When your byline said "knight in shining armor" I just imagined something more conventional! 1.2487 0.03649 189 148 35 6
5249 Sorry, but since the divorce, I'm still a bit rusty at this dating thing. 1.2486 0.03618 185 144 36 5
5250 Another interesting evening with the Lady's knight out. 1.2486 0.03854 185 147 30 8
5251 I expected your armor to be shinier. 1.2486 0.03910 181 144 29 8
5252 Online dating has caused me to develop some pretty thick skin 1.2486 0.03910 181 144 29 8
5253 I don’t know...we just don’t have anything in common anymore. 1.2486 0.03750 181 142 33 6
5254 I guess this is just another night out. 1.2486 0.03831 181 143 31 7
5255 You could of thought of a less obvious way to break up 1.2486 0.03667 181 141 35 5
5256 Do the Knights of Columbus joust? 1.2486 0.04204 177 144 22 11
5257 "Me Too" has me afraid to let my guard down. 1.2486 0.03718 177 138 34 5
5258 Listen, i like you, but I’m like an onion. Ive got a lot of layers. 1.2486 0.04049 177 142 26 9
5259 True, it's both defensive and offensive 1.2486 0.03541 177 136 38 3
5260 '..well, this is turning out to be a good knight..' 1.2486 0.03859 173 136 31 6
5261 Would you be offended if I asked for a straw? 1.2486 0.03859 173 136 31 6
5262 Other than the press briefing, things went pretty well, I think. 1.2486 0.04112 173 139 25 9
5263 I just feel like we've been jousting a lot lately. 1.2486 0.03681 173 134 35 4
5264 #HimToo 1.2486 0.04029 173 138 27 8
5265 I'm a bachelor. My other clothes needed ironing. 1.2486 0.04112 173 139 25 9
5266 We're through. You're just too closed off. 1.2486 0.03771 173 135 33 5
5267 I said the food was Mediterranean, not Medieval. 1.2486 0.03771 173 135 33 5
5268 I just pour it through the grill in the front, and hope some gets into my mouth. 1.2486 0.03771 173 135 33 5
5269 I'm not a damsel in distress. 1.2485 0.03733 169 131 34 4
5270 I reasoned that one can’t be too careful in the #Me Too era! 1.2485 0.04006 169 134 28 7
5271 That lamp is embarrassingly outdated. 1.2485 0.03733 169 131 34 4
5272 First dates are awkward. A least this way I make a lasting impression. 1.2485 0.03826 169 132 32 5
5273 For the last time, no, you may not have a straw. 1.2485 0.03733 169 131 34 4
5274 I tend to really like old-fashioned women 1.2485 0.04006 169 134 28 7
5275 What makes you think I'm soooo guarded? 1.2485 0.03917 169 133 30 6
5276 Because it's a vin de garde, that's why. 1.2485 0.03733 169 131 34 4
5277 This isn't the knight we had planned. 1.2485 0.03787 165 128 33 4
5278 Just so you know, I am not a woman for one Knight 1.2485 0.04069 165 131 27 7
5279 I think the dating service is dated. 1.2485 0.03787 165 128 33 4
5280 Yes, Herb, it's called The Golden Dragon, I get it... 1.2485 0.03884 165 129 31 5
5281 Oooooh... I think I’m at the wrong table 1.2485 0.04069 165 131 27 7
5282 Honey, I love the way you look to knight 1.2484 0.03944 161 126 30 5
5283 My therapist told me to let my guard down. 1.2484 0.03844 161 125 32 4
5284 Knight in my dating profile was misspelled 1.2484 0.04041 161 127 28 6
5285 Charmed. But this really is no way to quit drinking! 1.2484 0.03844 161 125 32 4
5286 A chainmail response...and you? 1.2484 0.04006 157 123 29 5
5287 WELL, YOU CAN'T BE TOO CAREFUL ON A FIRST DATE------- 1.2484 0.04006 157 123 29 5
5288 No, it's vintage, but it's new to me. 1.2484 0.04006 157 123 29 5
5289 I'm glad it makes you feel gallant but we're still cancelling our subscription to Amazon Prime. 1.2484 0.04377 153 123 22 8
5290 Your profile mentioned you were germaphobic. 1.2484 0.04278 153 122 24 7
5291 Yes, my profile on Match did say that I'm a night person. 1.2484 0.03965 153 119 30 4
5292 Damn it! Note to self: Bars no longer supply straws. Bring straw with you. And/or find a new first date helmet. 1.2484 0.04377 153 123 22 8
5293 Let me guess. The maitre d' had a hard time finding a tie to match your suit. 1.2484 0.04570 153 125 18 10
5294 Your profile said this would be a night to remember. 1.2484 0.04072 153 120 28 5
5295 Since the last election,it’s been all about your manhood. 1.2484 0.04278 153 122 24 7
5296 And they said chivalry was dead. 1.2483 0.04354 149 119 23 7
5297 Ohhhh I get it "blind date". 1.2483 0.04030 149 116 29 4
5298 A bib would’ve been less intimidating. 1.2483 0.04325 145 115 24 6
5299 I said I would like a "night out",not a knight out 1.2483 0.04213 145 114 26 5
5300 So, what's your ensign? 1.2474 0.03226 190 144 45 1
5301 You never told me you have a bald spot! 1.2474 0.03708 190 150 33 7
5302 Thanks for meeting me here. I was horsing around and lost track of time. 1.2474 0.03632 190 149 35 6
5303 To be honest, we Knights of the Roundtable generally don’t drink cabernet franc. 1.2473 0.03836 186 148 30 8
5304 It does have a bit of metallic taste to it... 1.2473 0.03812 182 144 31 7
5305 Christine, don't get me wrong, even I know that Chivalry is dead. 1.2473 0.03812 182 144 31 7
5306 Well, Good Knight! 1.2473 0.04044 182 147 25 10
5307 Well, either you're my knight in shining armor or you just really, REALLY don't want to have sex on the first date. 1.2473 0.04044 182 147 25 10
5308 So when you messaged date knight you ment...ok time to go 1.2472 0.04028 178 143 26 9
5309 Another knight-night 1.2471 0.03752 174 136 33 5
5310 I wanted a night out. Not a knight in shining armor. 1.2471 0.04009 174 139 27 8
5311 Not exactly the date night I was planning. 1.2471 0.03839 174 137 31 6
5312 So Lance, how long have your been on Kdate? 1.2471 0.03806 170 133 32 5
5313 They're 5 and 3. Are you sure you can handle them? 1.2471 0.03985 170 135 28 7
5314 So, your profile said you've been... waiting for me? 1.2471 0.03985 170 135 28 7
5315 You said you were looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.2471 0.03897 170 134 30 6
5316 I said I was a 'night' person, not a morning person. 1.2471 0.03985 170 135 28 7
5317 Sorry, I thought the app was called Tinner. 1.2470 0.03956 166 131 29 6
5318 I don't know if you lied about your age but you match your photo exactly. 1.2470 0.03956 166 131 29 6
5319 I guess I was just hoping for slightly shinier armor... 1.2470 0.04048 166 132 27 7
5320 You really take that knight-in-shining-armor thing seriously, don't you? 1.2470 0.04048 166 132 27 7
5321 Honey, I know I call you, "My Knight in Shining Armour," but really - that's bedroom talk. 1.2469 0.04019 162 128 28 6
5322 I like to play it safe on first dates. 1.2469 0.04205 162 130 24 8
5323 When I said on my profile I was looking for a knight in shining armor I was speaking metaphorically. 1.2469 0.04113 162 129 26 7
5324 No, I’m not being defensive- I just believe in safe dating. 1.2469 0.03722 162 125 34 3
5325 Right. If they do not come up with a Pudding in a Cowcumber tonight, we are never coming back here. 1.2469 0.03722 162 125 34 3
5326 This is your idea of a night out? I'll have the dragon tail with the Bearnaise sauce 1.2469 0.03823 162 126 32 4
5327 I was hoping to have a good night. Let me get you a straw. 1.2469 0.03922 162 127 30 5
5328 This is not exactly what I meant by Knight in Shining Armour... 1.2469 0.04019 162 128 28 6
5329 It's one thing to not put your picture up on online dating, but ... 1.2469 0.04295 162 131 22 9
5330 I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised since the ad did say “be my knight in shining armor”. 1.2468 0.04084 158 125 27 6
5331 Is it true what they say about your lance? 1.2468 0.03984 158 124 29 5
5332 I think one of us just got a text 1.2468 0.03776 158 122 33 3
5333 Blind dates are always awkward. 1.2468 0.03882 158 123 31 4
5334 I absolutely adore these nights 'round the table with you 1.2468 0.04352 154 124 22 8
5335 Make my day. Drink that wine with your visor down. 1.2468 0.04543 154 126 18 10
5336 .I thought he said "amour", not "armor!" Probably from New England. 1.2467 0.04431 150 121 21 8
5337 Are you even a real knight? 1.2466 0.04073 146 114 28 4
5338 Have a night out!'" my boss said 1.2465 0.04021 142 110 29 3
5339 My profile did say "looking for a knight in shining armor" 1.2465 0.04021 142 110 29 3
5340 What you need, Sir Lancelot, is a straw, but not a plastic straw 1.2465 0.04262 142 112 25 5
5341 Not what you had in mind when you asked for a knight out? 1.2464 0.04217 138 108 26 4
5342 And this is what you call "shining"? 1.2464 0.04341 138 109 24 5
5343 Grail shmail. 1.2464 0.04090 138 107 28 3
5344 Your profile didn’t mention “well defended”. 1.2462 0.03494 195 152 38 5
5345 So sweetheart, tell me about what YOU remember from the medieval era? 1.2462 0.04511 130 103 22 5
5346 I thought you said "business casual." 1.2461 0.03460 191 148 39 4
5347 The last time I wore a chastity belt was lunch with Harvey Weinstein. 1.2461 0.03837 191 153 29 9
5348 Since Trump you have become so medieval. 1.2461 0.03765 191 152 31 8
5349 When you said a night on the town... 1.2460 0.03503 187 145 38 4
5350 Food court? I thought you said to wear something appropriate for Agincourt 1.2460 0.03664 187 147 34 6
5351 I could ask our waiter to bring you a straw. 1.2460 0.03741 187 148 32 7
5352 Did you have to take my personal ad so literally? 1.2460 0.03817 187 149 30 8
5353 You're neither shining or a knight. 1.2459 0.03872 183 146 29 8
5354 I’m not looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.2459 0.04098 183 149 23 11
5355 A bit too tinny for me. 1.2458 0.03848 179 142 30 7
5356 “You we’re right. We should have ordered the Grog.” 1.2458 0.03595 179 139 36 4
5357 It's been so long since the divorce that I'm finally feeling a little less guarded. 1.2457 0.03644 175 136 35 4
5358 I have to say... this is not what I expected when you said ‘let’s have a night out!’ 1.2457 0.03820 175 138 31 6
5359 I guess this makes me the damsell in distress. Yep, that sounds about right. 1.2457 0.03905 175 139 29 7
5360 Was Merlot the wrong choice?” 1.2457 0.03988 175 140 27 8
5361 I know your profile said you wore armor, but I thought it was the name of your favorite cologne 1.2457 0.03905 175 139 29 7
5362 Your knight in shining armor excuse is getting old. 1.2456 0.03964 171 136 28 7
5363 It seems like an age since I’ve seen you 1.2456 0.03787 171 134 32 5
5364 I plan to propose it as our official uniform at the next #himtoo rally. 1.2456 0.03876 171 135 30 6
5365 Well, yes, I did say I was looking for a knight in shining armor... 1.2456 0.04134 171 138 24 9
5366 You said you wanted a date knight." 1.2456 0.03876 171 135 30 6
5367 Yes, I can understand that it's not easy speed dating in that getup! 1.2456 0.03876 171 135 30 6
5368 I simply told the Dating App that I had a shiny exterior. 1.2456 0.04050 171 137 26 8
5369 My last wife said my loyalties were misplaced. 1.2456 0.03787 171 134 32 5
5370 She may have been middle aged, but this blind date struck her as positively medieval. 1.2456 0.04050 171 137 26 8
5371 I thought you wanted “ a Knight out”. 1.2455 0.03843 167 131 31 5
5372 They say chivalry's dead, but I honor it knightly. 1.2455 0.03935 167 132 29 6
5373 I understand, but I just don't think that most people expect Tinder posts to be quite so literal. 1.2455 0.03748 167 130 33 4
5374 You're not exactly what I prayed for, but apparently you're the answer. 1.2455 0.04026 167 133 27 7
5375 I can see from the look on your face that you were expecting my armor to be shinier. 1.2455 0.04201 167 135 23 9
5376 I just haven't felt quite myself since my last past-life regression therapy appointment. 1.2454 0.03997 163 129 28 6
5377 You can never be too careful. 1.2454 0.03997 163 129 28 6
5378 Sorry if I'm not a damsel in distress... 1.2454 0.03702 163 126 34 3
5379 Reenactment is fine,but I have outgrown,damsel in distress. 1.2454 0.03803 163 127 32 4
5380 Well, you're in distress, but I pictured a different sort of damsel." 1.2454 0.03803 163 127 32 4
5381 Yes Dear, I think Kavanaugh's confirmation was GREAT! 1.2453 0.04061 159 126 27 6
5382 You say mead, I say wine, let's call the whole thing off. 1.2453 0.03962 159 125 29 5
5383 Lately you've been taking 'not talking about your feelings' to an entirely new level ! 1.2453 0.04158 159 127 25 7
5384 I thought we had to dress-up at this restaurant! 1.2452 0.04026 155 122 28 5
5385 At least you'll be safe from the #Me Too movement 1.2450 0.03871 151 117 31 3
5386 I will not order the swordfish. I will not have Napoleon for dessert and I most certainly will not ask them to play Night and Day you are the one. 1.2450 0.03509 200 157 37 6
5387 You know, I didn't literally mean a knight in shining armor. Would you like a straw? 1.2449 0.04486 147 119 20 8
5388 Your non verbal reaction to the #MeToo movement may be overdone. 1.2448 0.03674 192 152 33 7
5389 You're not at all like your profile, Bernard. 1.2447 0.03568 188 147 36 5
5390 I'm disappointed. Your profile said you are a knight in SHINING armor. 1.2446 0.03853 184 147 29 8
5391 You were once, Gawain, but the shine is off the armour if you know what I mean. 1.2446 0.03532 184 143 37 4
5392 No, I can be a knight in shining armor but still want to split the tab. 1.2446 0.03775 184 146 31 7
5393 When you texted I'd know you because you'd be my knight in shining armor...well, this is awkard. 1.2444 0.03988 180 145 26 9
5394 Battling for an elected office again? 1.2444 0.03988 180 145 26 9
5395 I want to congratulate you on your new Supreme Court clerkship. Cute dress! 1.2444 0.03988 180 145 26 9
5396 Plastic straws are forbidden 1.2444 0.03909 180 144 28 8
5397 Lancelot? No, my name is Sy. 1.2443 0.03801 176 139 31 6
5398 I wasn't sure what to expect when my sister said "blind date". 1.2443 0.03885 176 140 29 7
5399 Honey, my dearest damsel, I'm prepared for your distress. 1.2443 0.03885 176 140 29 7
5400 I'm jousting with the #MeToo Movement on a few levels. 1.2442 0.03676 172 134 34 4
5401 Something about this night is wrong. 1.2442 0.04029 172 138 26 8
5402 Our divorce will be amicable, I promise! 1.2442 0.03676 172 134 34 4
5403 Drinking wine isn't the hardest thing we do in this outfit,but you wished for 'a knight in shinning armor! 1.2442 0.03767 172 135 32 5
5404 This is not what I meant when I said dress up night. 1.2442 0.03767 172 135 32 5
5405 Well, at least I don’t need to use fabric softener 1.2440 0.04005 168 134 27 7
5406 Oh, yes, it's a movement #NotMeAgain 1.2440 0.04093 168 135 25 8
5407 Sorry I’m late, ma’am. I lost track of time. 1.2440 0.03915 168 133 29 6
5408 Tonight, I’m the knight who says oui.” 1.2440 0.03823 168 132 31 5
5409 This isn't defense it's offense, girlfriend. 1.2439 0.03782 164 128 32 4
5410 Ever since that rainy weekend, I'm not sure I can't rust you again. 1.2439 0.04068 164 131 26 7
5411 You know, there are lots of dating sites for people without herpes. 1.2439 0.04159 164 132 24 8
5412 My friends call me Lance, more frequently that I like. 1.2439 0.03975 164 130 28 6
5413 You can just wipe away that sad face, this night is young. 1.2439 0.03880 164 129 30 5
5414 Men are under attack. I just wanted to play it safe. 1.2439 0.04068 164 131 26 7
5415 So that's how a sixteen-year-old avoids getting carded in a bar! 1.2439 0.03975 164 130 28 6
5416 When you told me you had a big night planned, I wasn’t thinking of this. 1.2437 0.04039 160 127 27 6
5417 Shall we make it an early knight? 1.2437 0.04039 160 127 27 6
5418 Guinevere_razzle_dazzle_69? 1.2437 0.04321 160 130 21 9
5419 Crisp, full-bodied, nice finish, the tannens are a wee bit aggressive, but with time it has the potential to go medieval on your ass. 1.2437 0.04039 160 127 27 6
5420 I thought I’d ordered an armored car. 1.2437 0.03735 160 124 33 3
5421 This is not what I expected, when I signed up for a night out. 1.2437 0.03839 160 125 31 4
5422 Dan was a little disappointed when she said he could just call her 'Gwen'. 1.2437 0.04039 160 127 27 6
5423 I get it but this is not what I had in mind for a blind date 1.2437 0.04135 160 128 25 7
5424 Joan was fed up with niche dating websites. 1.2436 0.04003 156 123 28 5
5425 Lancelot never asked for a straw. 1.2436 0.04105 156 124 26 6
5426 My ex always acted like such a helpless princess. 1.2436 0.04105 156 124 26 6
5427 It's a first date. I don't want you to judge me on my looks. 1.2436 0.04105 156 124 26 6
5428 After the knighting, I lost interest in people. 1.2436 0.04003 156 123 28 5
5429 You don't look like your photo on Tindr 1.2435 0.03506 193 151 37 5
5430 A knight out with his date. 1.2434 0.04277 152 122 23 7
5431 But your eHarmony request was for a knight in shining armor! 1.2434 0.04069 152 120 27 5
5432 When you suggested a night out, this isn’t what I was expecting 1.2434 0.04069 152 120 27 5
5433 You’ve got an impenetrable personality. May we just say “good night?” 1.2434 0.03960 152 119 29 4
5434 Did I take it to literally? 1.2434 0.03927 189 153 26 10
5435 Not exactly the nightcap I had in mind, but I can dig it. 1.2434 0.03855 189 152 28 9
5436 This isn't what I was thinking when I said I needed a date night... 1.2432 0.03515 185 144 37 4
5437 I am suspicious that you think that taking me to dinner is going to lead to a one knight stand. 1.2432 0.04247 148 118 24 6
5438 When I asked you to be my knight in shining armor, I didn't mean for you to take it literally. 1.2432 0.04247 148 118 24 6
5439 You're a tight-lipped one. 1.2432 0.03790 148 114 32 2
5440 As a Yale grad, I have to tell you I might go all medieval on you. 1.2432 0.04354 148 119 22 7
5441 OK, yes, I did say that I wanted to have a good night... 1.2432 0.03678 185 146 33 6
5442 Your profile said you had a sharp tongue . . . 1.2431 0.03646 181 142 34 5
5443 Don't even think about asking for a plastic straw. 1.2431 0.03729 181 143 32 6
5444 Your Murphy Brown costume sucks. 1.2431 0.03646 181 142 34 5
5445 Could we please pick the next restraunt for the food instead of the table shape? 1.2431 0.03729 181 143 32 6
5446 No, it's not rust. I used superglue. 1.2431 0.03890 181 145 28 8
5447 You want a child. I want to dress up like a child. I still don't see why that's not enough. 1.2431 0.03646 181 142 34 5
5448 This isn't working. I say day, you say knight. 1.2431 0.03890 181 145 28 8
5449 After the recent confirmation hearings I felt this was the safest way to go" 1.2431 0.04093 144 113 27 4
5450 Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned "knight in shining amor" in my profile. 1.2429 0.03948 177 142 27 8
5451 This is not what I meant when I said date night. 1.2429 0.04028 177 143 25 9
5452 I remember the days when you could take barbs. 1.2429 0.03608 177 138 35 4
5453 Thanks for the night out. 1.2429 0.03866 177 141 29 7
5454 I have a very vulnerable ego and easily get hurt. 1.2429 0.03608 177 138 35 4
5455 I know we belong to different political parties, but this is a bit extreme. 1.2428 0.04008 173 139 26 8
5456 Your profile said "shining armor." 1.2428 0.03923 173 138 28 7
5457 Darn app! I wanted to go out at night! Not with a knight! 1.2428 0.04008 173 139 26 8
5458 Well... Your Ad said you were looking for a Knight in Shining Armor. 1.2428 0.03923 173 138 28 7
5459 ...and then he forgot to pick up my dry cleaning today. These millennial squires are driving me to distraction. 1.2426 0.03803 169 133 31 5
5460 Well , at least I can see that I'm making a good reflection on you. 1.2426 0.03894 169 134 29 6
5461 You really want your reds to be served at dungeon temperature. 1.2426 0.03548 202 160 35 7
5462 Spencer was getting defensive again. 1.2424 0.03859 165 130 30 5
5463 I’m working on body positivity but I’m not there yet. 1.2424 0.03859 165 130 30 5
5464 Your ponytail is so in fashion these days. 1.2424 0.03762 165 129 32 4
5465 I thought you said you were," a mid level knight". 1.2424 0.03762 165 129 32 4
5466 Well, get it out of your system. 1.2424 0.03859 165 130 30 5
5467 "A fruity wine, yes, with a soft mouthfeel, but also inexplicatly metallic." 1.2424 0.03859 165 130 30 5
5468 Tonight to knight I need your love tonight 1.2424 0.03954 165 131 28 6
5469 In your online profile, your armor looked shinier. 1.2424 0.03954 165 131 28 6
5470 I thought you wanted a date knight? 1.2422 0.03818 161 126 31 4
5471 Guess I don't want any knight in shining armor after all. 1.2422 0.03918 161 127 29 5
5472 What's the catch. 1.2422 0.03918 161 127 29 5
5473 Gosh, it feels like ages since I've been here. 1.2421 0.03909 190 154 26 10
5474 Would you like a straw, Sir Lunchalot? 1.2420 0.03980 157 124 28 5
5475 Why can't you ever remember to bring a change of clothes for when we go to dinner after work? 1.2420 0.04371 157 128 20 9
5476 a knight to remember 1.2420 0.03980 157 124 28 5
5477 It was drip-dry. I’ll buy an oil can. 1.2420 0.04180 157 126 24 7
5478 I understand you’re going for chivalrous, but you’re taking things too far. 1.2419 0.03966 186 151 25 10
5479 I’m having a bad (k)night... 1.2419 0.03816 186 149 29 8
5480 Well...they said I'd meet a night in shining armor one day but I was expecting a white horse. 1.2419 0.03816 186 149 29 8
5481 No jousting on the first date? 1.2418 0.04150 153 122 25 6
5482 You know, when I said I wanted a knight in shining armor, this isn't quite what I had in mind... 1.2418 0.04252 153 123 23 7
5483 My former girlfriend broke up with me. She said that I was emotionally unavailable. 1.2418 0.03792 182 145 30 7
5484 It’s nice to see your dedication to being chivalrous. 1.2418 0.03792 182 145 30 7
5485 Don't be surprised if the Merlot tastes a little tinny. 1.2418 0.03628 182 143 34 5
5486 I am afraid of things like tomatoes and asparagus. 1.2418 0.03711 182 144 32 6
5487 It's like the valet had never seen a horse before. Anyhow, do you go on a lot of Tinder dates? 1.2418 0.03628 182 143 34 5
5488 I hope, Sir Knight, there's a chastity belt under that armor. 1.2418 0.03792 182 145 30 7
5489 When I said I wanted something “full bodied” I meant the wine. 1.2416 0.04222 149 119 24 6
5490 Yes, Arthur . . . the table is round and the grail appears to be holy. 1.2416 0.04113 149 118 26 5
5491 And you think I am being defensive? 1.2416 0.03768 149 115 32 2
5492 I don’t trust these guys. They fed me my horse. 1.2416 0.04001 149 117 28 4
5493 This is going to be a long night. 1.2416 0.03678 178 140 33 5
5494 Tinder didn't prepare me for this. 1.2414 0.03987 174 140 26 8
5495 I need to stop going on blind dates. 1.2414 0.03729 174 137 32 5
5496 IS THIS ROUND TABLE LARGE ENOUGH? 1.2414 0.03987 174 140 26 8
5497 It has more bling than a pussy hat 1.2414 0.03547 174 135 36 3
5498 Next time, I'd rather you suggest dinner on an evening that you don't have a jousting match afterward. 1.2412 0.03874 170 135 29 6
5499 I thought you said a night with amore. 1.2412 0.04135 170 138 23 9
5500 Call me 'my liege', like they did at Holton-Arms School. 1.2412 0.03874 170 135 29 6
5501 I wouldn't have guessed you're the old-fashioned, shy type. 1.2410 0.03319 195 151 41 3
5502 My memorable first dates? This certainly is not a knight to remember. 1.2410 0.03933 166 132 28 6
5503 Have straws been discontinued yet? 1.2410 0.03742 166 130 32 4
5504 What did you mean when you said this place was fit for a king? 1.2410 0.04024 166 133 26 7
5505 Silverware......?!!! 1.2410 0.04024 166 133 26 7
5506 You're no Princess- but I would like to see you again. 1.2410 0.03437 166 127 38 1
5507 They told me I'd be a date for the night! 1.2410 0.04202 166 135 22 9
5508 So what made you swipe knight? 1.2410 0.03933 166 132 28 6
5509 so what then, i'm the damsel in distress? 1.2410 0.03742 166 130 32 4
5510 This isnt the night on the town I had in mind... 1.2410 0.03933 166 132 28 6
5511 So the concept is Renaissance fare 1.2410 0.03839 166 131 30 5
5512 I should have specified that I'm more of a morning person on my Tinder profile... 1.2410 0.03933 166 132 28 6
5513 Eloise sat back, glum and uncertain. She was committed to dismantling the patriarchy and despised the limp progressives who posted their values but didn't live them. But Rodrick was a massive alpha and it'd been forever since she'd had the good dick. 1.2409 0.04807 137 113 15 9
5514 Well to be perfectly honest your armor is a little dull. 1.2408 0.03358 191 148 40 3
5515 I'm meeting with Kavanaugh and this is my protective gear. 1.2408 0.03672 191 152 32 7
5516 Lately our jousting has become a bit listless. 1.2407 0.03695 162 126 33 3
5517 Frankly,I'm tired of your knight in shining armor routine. 1.2407 0.03695 162 126 33 3
5518 When I said a night on the town might help our relationship, this is not what I had in mind.... 1.2407 0.03695 162 126 33 3
5519 Nice hat Sir Drinksalot. 1.2407 0.03994 162 129 27 6
5520 I don't have much time I left my horse in a no parking zone. 1.2406 0.03873 187 151 27 9
5521 Are you sure we haven't met before? 1.2406 0.03721 187 149 31 7
5522 Come to my place? I'd like to show you my can-openers collection. 1.2406 0.03798 187 150 29 8
5523 On the bright side, our case will be heard by the Supreme Court. 1.2406 0.03873 187 151 27 9
5524 I'm 42, so yeah, I'm totally into full grown men who play video games. 1.2405 0.03958 158 125 28 5
5525 I try to limit myself to one of these a knight. 1.2405 0.04059 158 126 26 6
5526 What color are your eyes? 1.2405 0.03749 158 123 32 3
5527 I think I misunderstood the dating service when they said they wanted me to have a "good knight." 1.2404 0.04005 183 149 24 10
5528 ‘Our first date in months, and you couldn’t pick a place that didn’t remind me of work?” 1.2404 0.03773 183 146 30 7
5529 When I said I wanted a date night... 1.2403 0.03805 154 120 31 3
5530 When your dating profile said Knight in shining armour I thought you meant metaphorically. 1.2402 0.03908 179 144 27 8
5531 Lower your guard, Sid---I'm not that tough a feminist. 1.2402 0.03573 179 140 35 4
5532 I can understand having your guard up on a first date but did you really need to slaughter the valet? 1.2402 0.03988 179 145 25 9
5533 A few drinks help loosen me up. 1.2402 0.03660 179 141 33 5
5534 I think you over-prepared for pick-your-own-lobster. 1.2400 0.03883 175 140 28 7
5535 Another one with shining armor eh 1.2400 0.03798 175 139 30 6
5536 ...little different than the profile pic 1.2400 0.03621 175 137 34 4
5537 I'm more of a late afternoon in dull armor kind of guy. 1.2400 0.04049 175 142 24 9
5538 With STD these days, you can't be too careful... 1.2400 0.03529 175 136 36 3
5539 Didn't you tell me to iron my suit? 1.2400 0.03798 175 139 30 6
5540 Join me. We’ll be the knights of the round table. 1.2400 0.03710 175 138 32 5
5541 I like defensive. 1.2400 0.03798 175 139 30 6
5542 I couldn’t order wine in my burqa. 1.2400 0.03883 175 140 28 7
5543 You’ve grown on me, Gerald. You’re not as guarded as my other lovers. 1.2398 0.03942 171 137 27 7
5544 Your Match.com profile said you were"chivalrous" but this is ridiculous... 1.2398 0.03942 171 137 27 7
5545 A night at a round table? I thought you said a Knight of the Round Table. 1.2398 0.04195 171 140 21 10
5546 She’d hoped for more excitement having a knight out. 1.2398 0.03942 171 137 27 7
5547 I never imagined my knight in shining armor would drink merlot. 1.2397 0.03925 146 114 29 3
5548 You couldn't think of a more subtle way to show that chivalry isn't dead? 1.2397 0.03802 146 113 31 2
5549 Sorry, I'm used to a different kind of roundtable. 1.2396 0.03942 192 157 24 11
5550 If you think this is something, wait until you see me try to eat. 1.2396 0.03423 192 150 38 4
5551 Sorry...it's just not shiny enough. 1.2396 0.03579 192 152 34 6
5552 Dinner date? I guess chivalry's not dead after all. 1.2395 0.03818 167 132 30 5
5553 Does the shining armor ever come off? 1.2395 0.03723 167 131 32 4
5554 I'm feeling I'll suited for this relationship. 1.2395 0.03912 167 133 28 6
5555 It wasn’t such a nuisance before straws became so un-PC. 1.2395 0.04092 167 135 24 8
5556 I'm sorry, I didn't know this was a straw-free establishment. 1.2395 0.03912 167 133 28 6
5557 It matches my politics. 1.2395 0.03912 167 133 28 6
5558 I've got 3 kinds of lubes and 21 different oils, will any of them help loosen you up? 1.2395 0.03818 167 132 30 5
5559 Alas, the shining armor/'damsel thing isn't working either. 1.2395 0.03818 167 132 30 5
5560 Listen, your mother misunderstood when I said, "I wanted a good night out." 1.2394 0.04786 142 118 14 10
5561 Can you believe this is the only restaurant that serves roasted pheasant? 1.2394 0.03780 188 151 29 8
5562 It's Military Surplus. It's sure to be back in style soon. 1.2394 0.03704 188 150 31 7
5563 Is this your idea of a night out?" Deborah Blum, Beverly Hills, Ca 1.2393 0.04067 163 131 25 7
5564 With all the cuts to the FDA, you can’t be too careful. 1.2393 0.03777 163 128 31 4
5565 Is it just me or does this wine taste like metal? 1.2393 0.04067 163 131 25 7
5566 Sorry, Duane. I guess I didn't really consider the full implications of the shining armor. 1.2393 0.04159 163 132 23 8
5567 Nice night, huh? 1.2393 0.03675 163 127 33 3
5568 Aren't you taking this diet thing a little too far? 1.2393 0.03972 163 130 27 6
5569 That suit of the month club for the middle aged has gotten a bit literal dont you think? 1.2393 0.03777 163 128 31 4
5570 She did say she’d set me up with a night in shining armor 1.2393 0.03876 163 129 29 5
5571 Forget I said it. 1.2393 0.04067 163 131 25 7
5572 Not feeling it...could I see you joust a little bit? 1.2391 0.03675 184 146 32 6
5573 Yes Arthur..your profile did state that you were a Knight in shining armour. 1.2391 0.03510 184 144 36 4
5574 Your armour isn't shining. 1.2391 0.03675 184 146 32 6
5575 From the 1990s Archives: "Of course, I always wear protection." 1.2391 0.03833 184 148 28 8
5576 How could you forget the sword? 1.2391 0.03755 184 147 30 7
5577 A nice unassuming wine, with just a hint of rust. 1.2391 0.03755 184 147 30 7
5578 So...you come 'round this table often? 1.2391 0.03755 184 147 30 7
5579 Mmmmm....well...it’s just that I was expecting a little shinier, lighter, and frankly a little less vintage. 1.2391 0.04548 138 112 19 7
5580 I know this is called a "blind date," but isn't this taking it a little too far? 1.2390 0.03833 159 125 30 4
5581 Hold on. I'll ask the waiter to get you a straw. 1.2390 0.03508 159 122 36 1
5582 You look better in person than your Tinder pic. 1.2390 0.03936 159 126 28 5
5583 I understand your #MeToo pushback, but the horse ride home is just not happening.” 1.2390 0.03936 159 126 28 5
5584 I think they have paper straws. 1.2390 0.04322 159 130 20 9
5585 My attorney said, 'Think of it as a chastity belt for a man's reputation. 1.2390 0.03728 159 124 32 3
5586 This is our first date. Aren’t you being a little too cautious? 1.2390 0.03833 159 125 30 4
5587 Sorry, I don’t date literalists. 1.2390 0.03728 159 124 32 3
5588 When I said I was looking for a knight in shining armor, this isn't exactly what I meant. 1.2389 0.03968 180 146 25 9
5589 Does this protect you from me, too? 1.2389 0.03555 180 141 35 4
5590 Ah, not a night date a knight date! 1.2389 0.03808 180 144 29 7
5591 Sooo, you told the kids that I was abusive? 1.2389 0.03889 180 145 27 8
5592 This is a 1894 imperial burgundy from central France. 1.2388 0.03750 201 163 28 10
5593 You looked very different from your profile picture 1.2387 0.03893 155 122 29 4
5594 I do not consent to a good knight kiss. 1.2387 0.03893 155 122 29 4
5595 Gwen, you can call me Arthur, King Arthur. 1.2387 0.03783 155 121 31 3
5596 ‘“Maybe ‘the night is still young,’ but how can I know for sure unless you lift that visor?” 1.2387 0.03893 155 122 29 4
5597 How long? 1.2386 0.03779 176 140 30 6
5598 .. and the armour is not as shining as I'd hoped 1.2386 0.03511 176 137 36 3
5599 This wasn’t what Barbara meant when she said she wanted to be courted. 1.2386 0.03518 197 156 35 6
5600 Of course I suspected. You're the first "Lancelot" I've met on JDate. 1.2384 0.04276 151 122 22 7
5601 WHAT PART OF A NIGHT OUT DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND? 1.2384 0.04172 151 121 24 6
5602 TFW 23 and Me says you're 19% Saxo-Norman 1.2384 0.04172 151 121 24 6
5603 When you told me to get ready for a wild and crazy night, I was not expecting this. 1.2384 0.03834 172 137 29 6
5604 I'd say its either "steely" or "flinty" -- as usual. 1.2384 0.03744 172 136 31 5
5605 Don’t you dare play footsie with me! 1.2384 0.03834 172 137 29 6
5606 This Me Too movement has me on edge. 1.2384 0.03921 172 138 27 7
5607 Vintage or new? 1.2383 0.03711 193 155 30 8
5608 Dis your ex keep your coat of arms? 1.2381 0.03982 168 135 26 7
5609 Hold on, I forgot to ask the waiter for a straw 1.2381 0.03762 189 152 29 8
5610 A typical modern scene is disrupted by a single incongruous detail, to humorous effect! 1.2381 0.03891 168 134 28 6
5611 I think I can make a case for a straw." 1.2381 0.03798 168 133 30 5
5612 Armored Anonymous, eh? Not cute. 1.2381 0.03891 168 134 28 6
5613 Do you want me to ask the waiter for a straw? 1.2381 0.03982 168 135 26 7
5614 I do this every knight. 1.2381 0.04353 147 119 21 7
5615 I'm so sorry, but I just got a text that I'm needed at an emergency jousting. We should do this again sometime. 1.2381 0.04245 147 118 23 6
5616 I wat a more open relationship. 1.2378 0.03408 185 144 38 3
5617 Your profile said you are looking for your knight in shining armor, I thought you’d like this. 1.2378 0.03891 185 150 26 9
5618 You’re clearly upset. What did you think I meant by ‘The Man of Steel?’ 1.2378 0.03576 185 146 34 5
5619 It’s definitely better in virtual reality. 1.2378 0.03855 164 130 29 5
5620 You don't look a thing like your Facebook photo. 1.2378 0.04136 164 133 23 8
5621 Clever pun, Howard. 1.2378 0.04044 164 132 25 7
5622 I'm surprised they don't have flagons here, and no, I didn't wear this on my Match.com listing. But it's who I am. 1.2378 0.03656 164 128 33 3
5623 Frankly, your germaphobea is getting a little tiresome.. 1.2378 0.03757 164 129 31 4
5624 Now that you finally showed up, I think that I'd rather have you in shining spandex. 1.2378 0.04087 143 113 26 4
5625 Is it just me, or do you detect a hint of metal on the nose? 1.2378 0.04434 143 116 20 7
5626 You said that you wanted a night out. 1.2376 0.03789 181 145 29 7
5627 No, I am not looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.2376 0.03624 181 143 33 5
5628 Why don’t you try AA? 1.2376 0.03789 181 145 29 7
5629 Well, my profile did say that I will be your knight in shining armor." 1.2376 0.03624 181 143 33 5
5630 That isn't what I meant by well-dressed 'male'. 1.2375 0.04013 160 128 26 6
5631 I think you have a drinking problem. 1.2375 0.04110 160 129 24 7
5632 I can't really hear you in that thing. Please tell me you didn't just say that I put the "Damn" in "Damsel in Distress"? 1.2375 0.03812 160 126 30 4
5633 I see you have’nt updated your online profile. 1.2375 0.03812 160 126 30 4
5634 Like President Trump says: We young white men are the victims of the #MeToo Movement and have to protect ourselves when on dates. 1.2375 0.04013 160 128 26 6
5635 I'm being iron-ic. 1.2375 0.03914 160 127 28 5
5636 A true knight would allow me an entree. 1.2375 0.03812 160 126 30 4
5637 Peek a boo I see you! 1.2375 0.03812 160 126 30 4
5638 My friends say that once you break down my armor I am a nice guy. 1.2375 0.03812 160 126 30 4
5639 Really, honey. The square table is fine for tonight. 1.2375 0.03914 160 127 28 5
5640 Well, I'M on a crusade to shame moms on the internet. 1.2375 0.03600 160 124 34 2
5641 Even wine doesn't make the knights exciting around here.... 1.2375 0.03708 160 125 32 3
5642 I'm beginning to believe you're shunning my shining. 1.2373 0.03673 177 140 32 5
5643 My mother always told me to be careful and take protection on a blind date. 1.2373 0.03844 177 142 28 7
5644 Nobody'll ever pin anything on me! 1.2373 0.03673 177 140 32 5
5645 Protection from rich frats who like beer? 1.2373 0.03927 177 143 26 8
5646 Steel yourself; I’ve got some bad news. 1.2372 0.03871 156 123 29 4
5647 You took date night literally. 1.2372 0.04179 156 126 23 7
5648 I thought I told the dating service i want amore 1.2372 0.03762 156 122 31 3
5649 So what if you're the white knight, you can still drink red wine. 1.2372 0.03976 156 124 27 5
5650 I don't think your company, Outer Armour, has a chance. 1.2372 0.03871 156 123 29 4
5651 Glad you were able to fit me in before Comic Con. 1.2371 0.03470 194 153 36 5
5652 Now that I know why you said you like one-knight stands on your page, is Lancelot your real name?" 1.2370 0.03901 173 139 27 7
5653 I know you can talk. Now say something worthy of a New Yorker cartoon contest. 1.2370 0.03725 173 137 31 5
5654 Is your family very Orthodox? 1.2370 0.03986 173 140 25 8
5655 But your bio said you were looking for a knight in shining armor? 1.2370 0.03901 173 139 27 7
5656 Not every Knight has shiny armor you know! 1.2370 0.03901 173 139 27 7
5657 LADY, I'VE BEEN WAITING HERE 400 YEARS FOR THE WAITER TO BRING THE MENU. 1.2368 0.04352 152 124 20 8
5658 Wow, Guinevere! I wouldn’t have recognized you! 1.2368 0.03931 152 120 28 4
5659 I should have been more specific when I said I prefer night dates. 1.2368 0.04147 152 122 24 6
5660 This must be your knight out. 1.2368 0.04041 152 121 26 5
5661 He only makes me wear a chastity belt. 1.2368 0.04251 152 123 22 7
5662 "Should we get the check, mate?" 1.2368 0.03592 190 151 33 6
5663 When you billed yourself as a knight in shining armour, I didn't take you literally. 1.2368 0.04147 152 122 24 6
5664 What the fuck kind of shit is this? Seriously. Fuck. 1.2368 0.03961 190 156 23 11
5665 Whether or not the damsels were distressed, it sounds like you're not ready to commit." 1.2367 0.03870 169 135 28 6
5666 I guess you’re serious about no means No. 1.2367 0.03587 169 132 34 3
5667 You can call it your Halloween Practice Run all you want but you’re on your own when I finish this drink. 1.2367 0.04219 169 139 20 10
5668 We met at the Saratoga Renaissance Fair, what did you expect? 1.2367 0.04048 169 137 24 8
5669 I know your Personals ad said 'I'm a real knight person,' but I thought you were just being ironic. 1.2366 0.03872 186 151 26 9
5670 A great knight for wine. 1.2366 0.03477 186 146 36 4
5671 I've just been feeling so 'closed-in' lately. 1.2366 0.03477 186 146 36 4
5672 OK, so you still have the armor, but after 30 years it sure isn't shining anymore. 1.2365 0.04326 148 120 21 7
5673 Are you up for some verbal jousting? Or, maybe just a 'knight' out-on-the-town? 1.2365 0.04219 148 119 23 6
5674 What do you mean, "I was speaking metaphorically"? Alice, to be perfectly honest with you, I don't even know what a metaphor is. 1.2364 0.04022 165 133 25 7
5675 No! I told you I wasn't going to carry your straws any more! 1.2364 0.03929 165 132 27 6
5676 I hear the breastplate's awfully good. 1.2364 0.04022 165 133 25 7
5677 I hate Tinder dates. 1.2364 0.03636 165 129 33 3
5678 Tinder didn't do you justice. Shall I request a straw? 1.2364 0.03533 165 128 35 2
5679 You can't fool me, I see you checking out the waitress and wishing you could pinch her bottom. 1.2363 0.03771 182 146 29 7
5680 This is going to be quite a (k)night 1.2363 0.03689 182 145 31 6
5681 No, it’s not just a game- it’s a way of life. 1.2363 0.03771 182 146 29 7
5682 Armorsonly.com 1.2361 0.04180 144 115 24 5
5683 I still get notes of metal mostly. 1.2361 0.04062 144 114 26 4
5684 Oh, so YOU'RE afraid now? 1.2360 0.03991 161 129 26 6
5685 I should've known better than to swipe knight... 1.2360 0.04273 161 132 20 9
5686 Trust me, it has a delightful nose. 1.2360 0.03987 178 145 24 9
5687 You said 'date night', didn't you? 1.2360 0.03907 178 144 26 8
5688 What were the chances that my name is Gawain, I'm dressed like this, and we were seated at a round table? 1.2360 0.03655 178 141 32 5
5689 I know when you're just coming out of a prior relationship you tend to be very protective of yourself. 1.2360 0.03385 178 138 38 2
5690 He was just too shiny. 1.2360 0.03567 178 140 34 4
5691 What a waste of my time you are! All you do is clank! 1.2360 0.03907 178 144 26 8
5692 and another thing about superior western values 1.2360 0.03741 178 142 30 6
5693 You wouldn't happen to be a damsel in distress? 1.2360 0.03741 178 142 30 6
5694 I understand you have to be a bit wary on a first date. 1.2360 0.03741 178 142 30 6
5695 I''m sorry. I can't give you a straw. 1.2360 0.03655 178 141 32 5
5696 I know my Match.com profile said I wanted a "knight in shining armor" but didn't mean it literally. 1.2357 0.04132 140 111 25 4
5697 I told you, this place banned straws to save the environment. 1.2357 0.03953 157 125 27 5
5698 I never wanted to hurt you, but it's been hard not to see it as a challenge. 1.2357 0.03849 157 124 29 4
5699 Clearly your expectation of "we need to talk" is different than mine 1.2357 0.04055 157 126 25 6
5700 I thought the invitation said drinks "at night" not "with knight" 1.2357 0.03953 157 125 27 5
5701 This restaurant has an unusual dress code. 1.2356 0.03522 174 136 35 3
5702 Sorry, we turned all the straws into plowshares. 1.2356 0.04288 174 145 17 12
5703 I'd like to see that waiter treat us that way tonight. 1.2356 0.03881 174 140 27 7
5704 Sorry, I’m joust not that into you. 1.2356 0.03966 174 141 25 8
5705 When a renaissance man asked me out on a date,I never imagined it would end up like this! 1.2353 0.04326 153 125 20 8
5706 Actually, I was hoping you’d bring a little more "amour" tonight. 1.2353 0.04196 170 140 20 10
5707 Now I feel safe enough to drink with you again! 1.2353 0.03701 187 150 30 7
5708 My ad said “shining” armor. 1.2353 0.03376 187 146 38 3
5709 So you think that #MeToo isn't enough? 1.2353 0.03569 170 133 34 3
5710 I gave up the "shining" part a long time ago, so you're good. 1.2353 0.03850 170 136 28 6
5711 The dating site said that you were into "heavy metal"! Jeff Manly Toronto,On 1.2353 0.03850 170 136 28 6
5712 My profile DID say Knight in Shining Armor, after all. 1.2353 0.04123 153 123 24 6
5713 You know, it's so hard to get through to you ~ I never know what you're thinking or feeling, and sometimes I feel that's the way you want to keep it. 1.2353 0.04027 170 138 24 8
5714 Not the knight in shining armor Susan imagined. 1.2353 0.04112 170 139 22 9
5715 My humblest apologies, milady. Based on your Tinder profile, I reckoned you would rather fancy the Shiraz. 1.2353 0.03569 170 133 34 3
5716 To Sue’s dismay, he looked exactly like he did in his Tinder pictures 1.2353 0.03850 170 136 28 6
5717 I’ll be honest. This “knight in shining armour schtick” isn’t easy to pull off while sipping Chardonnay. 1.2350 0.03671 183 146 31 6
5718 I'm just not feeling truly seen. 1.2350 0.03752 183 147 29 7
5719 Liberal or conservative? 1.2350 0.03752 183 147 29 7
5720 This night ... of all nights 1.2350 0.03752 183 147 29 7
5721 You took me quite seriously when I told you I was looking for "a knight in shining armor." 1.2349 0.03617 166 130 33 3
5722 So...you gonna take me home to knight? 1.2349 0.03908 166 133 27 6
5723 I feel like you still keep your armor up with me. 1.2349 0.03515 166 129 35 2
5724 It's OK. Here all the waiters are unarmed. 1.2349 0.03717 166 131 31 4
5725 It's been a problem without straws. 1.2349 0.03814 166 132 29 5
5726 Yeah, well, you may still be my knight but the shine wore off long ago. 1.2349 0.04091 166 135 23 8
5727 Despite the wishful thinking, Ye Olde Dating App was exactly like what it seemed. 1.2349 0.03908 166 133 27 6
5728 A knight's night out. 1.2349 0.03908 166 133 27 6
5729 My knight in shining armor was a figure of speech.... 1.2349 0.03717 166 131 31 4
5730 How about this for a knight out? 1.2346 0.03806 179 144 28 7
5731 Mother, I became too exasperated by your wardrobe criticisms. 1.2346 0.03722 179 143 30 6
5732 Nope. I’m a Hazel in a red dress. Thanks, though. 1.2346 0.03722 179 143 30 6
5733 This is all I am having; can you ask for a straw? 1.2346 0.03722 179 143 30 6
5734 Margaret finally got her knight out! 1.2346 0.03967 179 146 24 9
5735 When the ad said “knight in shining armor” I had no idea................................ 1.2346 0.03871 162 129 28 5
5736 When I said that I wanted one night alone, this is not what I meant, Steve. 1.2346 0.03771 162 128 30 4
5737 Less aged chivalry and more aged Chianti, please. 1.2346 0.03668 162 127 32 3
5738 Um...this is awkward...but what it says I’m ‘looking for’ on my Tinder profile is meant figuratively not literally... 1.2346 0.04064 162 131 24 7
5739 Why should I be surprised? The dating service promised me that I would meet my knight in shining armor. 1.2346 0.04158 162 132 22 8
5740 You idiot, what I said was "don't forget to wear protection for desert at my place." 1.2346 0.04249 162 133 20 9
5741 I sure miss straws. 1.2346 0.03771 162 128 30 4
5742 I know, but when you put that thing on, you knew that straws were no longer allowed. 1.2345 0.04268 145 117 22 6
5743 The bottles are half off on ‘Knight’s Night.’ 1.2345 0.04037 145 115 26 4
5744 Look, give it a chance. My Match.com posting explicitly said, Knight in Shining Armor! 1.2345 0.04486 145 119 18 8
5745 I'm afraid your shine is already wearing thin. 1.2344 0.03559 192 153 33 6
5746 Sorry, it's the helmet. I thought you said 'mead, too'. 1.2343 0.03945 175 142 25 8
5747 Off with the costume already! 1.2343 0.03504 175 137 35 3
5748 My red isn't pairing well with your white knight syndrome. 1.2342 0.04322 158 130 19 9
5749 So this is what you meant when you said you were a knight in shining armor ... 1.2342 0.03827 158 125 29 4
5750 So uh, you looked younger online..maybe it's the glasses 1.2342 0.04228 158 129 21 8
5751 Im a once a knight kinda guy 1.2342 0.03827 158 125 29 4
5752 Honestly, I was expecting more dragon. 1.2341 0.03415 205 163 36 6
5753 I thought we could spend the knight together. 1.2340 0.03760 188 152 28 8
5754 And to think a fancy place like this doesn't even have straws 1.2339 0.03739 171 136 30 5
5755 To be honest with you Ralph, this is not my idea of a night out on the town. 1.2339 0.03452 171 133 36 2
5756 They don't have a round table and they're out of straws; it's just not your day. 1.2339 0.03830 171 137 28 6
5757 I forgot to bring the straws. 1.2338 0.03994 154 123 26 5
5758 She: You lied to me. You told me you were warm, loyal and brave. He: No, I told you I was a knight in shining armor. 1.2337 0.03734 184 148 29 7
5759 I can't believe you quit your Day job!” 1.2337 0.03654 184 147 31 6
5760 My ex used to say I was too vulnerable. 1.2337 0.03813 184 149 27 8
5761 Luckily, I just got the most beautiful stainless steel FDA-approved ultra long drinking straw on Amazon! 1.2337 0.03734 184 148 29 7
5762 Maybe a length of surgical tubing might work. 1.2335 0.03887 167 134 27 6
5763 Do you have a spare straw? 1.2335 0.03793 167 133 29 5
5764 Your online posting noted that you wanted someone with old-fashioned values and was be a good protector. 1.2335 0.03887 167 134 27 6
5765 So, do you enjoy frequent nights out? 1.2335 0.03887 167 134 27 6
5766 The moment she realized that "Plenty of Knights" was no better than "Plenty of Fish" 1.2335 0.03793 167 133 29 5
5767 You know, this taste more 14th century to me. 1.2335 0.04069 167 136 23 8
5768 Dating in Trump's America 1.2335 0.03979 167 135 25 7
5769 I notice a hint of iron on the front end. 1.2335 0.03424 197 156 36 5
5770 Sigh...this wasn't really what I meant by a night date. 1.2333 0.03787 180 145 28 7
5771 I too, sense a metal taste in the mouth! 1.2333 0.03948 150 119 27 4
5772 The shield in your avatar had more karats 1.2333 0.03619 180 143 32 5
5773 Nine and a half years of sobriety! What’s your secret, Sir Robert? 1.2333 0.04378 150 123 19 8
5774 It's so important to have friends like you to talk to, without the need to have my guard up. 1.2333 0.03787 180 145 28 7
5775 I will try the wine as soon as they bring me my straw. 1.2333 0.03787 180 145 28 7
5776 Literal much? 1.2333 0.03787 180 145 28 7
5777 I'm sorry, Gerald, but your armor has lost its shine. 1.2333 0.03443 180 141 36 3
5778 So sorry, they do not issue straws here." Joe Pitts, Washington, D 1.2331 0.03750 163 129 30 4
5779 I also said I was looking for a 'partner in crime.' 1.2331 0.03750 163 129 30 4
5780 A guilty conscience needs an armor. 1.2331 0.04135 163 133 22 8
5781 Fortnight is a video game, not a cosplay. 1.2331 0.03947 163 131 26 6
5782 You’ll have to open up to drink the wine. 1.2331 0.03850 163 130 28 5
5783 So, now my dating site does time travel as well? 1.2331 0.04225 163 134 20 9
5784 So - how was your day today? 1.2331 0.03850 163 130 28 5
5785 I wouldn't call it distress...angst, maybe? 1.2331 0.03947 163 131 26 6
5786 When filling out his dating profile, Arthur typed ‘night person.’ 1.2331 0.04135 163 133 22 8
5787 This isn't what I meant when I said one-night stand.." Cathy C, San Dieg 1.2330 0.03487 176 138 35 3
5788 Do I call you "sir"? 1.2329 0.04012 146 116 26 4
5789 Dear God, Gladys, I said RHETT Kavanaugh is joining is for a drink. 1.2328 0.03589 189 151 32 6
5790 Mid millennium modern clothing is in right now. 1.2327 0.04010 159 128 25 6
5791 In better light, this suit really shines. 1.2327 0.04010 159 128 25 6
5792 I know you said you were a bit defensive but perhaps you might have understated things 1.2327 0.03591 159 124 33 2
5793 I'm not really liking this. It's a little too much of a metallic taste for me. 1.2326 0.03627 172 136 32 4
5794 I hope you brought a metal straw, too. 1.2326 0.03985 172 140 24 8
5795 You asked for a Sir Galahad 1.2326 0.03532 172 135 34 3
5796 Straws are what, you say? 1.2326 0.03627 172 136 32 4
5797 I only hope there is a male within the mail. 1.2326 0.03627 172 136 32 4
5798 When I said girl's night out I didn't mean this.. 1.2326 0.03985 172 140 24 8
5799 I wasn't lying when I said shyness is the chink in my armor. 1.2326 0.03810 172 138 28 6
5800 Thanks,but what makes you say 'good knight?' 1.2326 0.03627 172 136 32 4
5801 You're not shining. I'll get the silver polish. 1.2324 0.03471 185 146 35 4
5802 Arthur, it's grate to see you. 1.2324 0.03794 185 150 27 8
5803 My dinner choice is usually pasta. 1.2324 0.03946 185 152 23 10
5804 Your sabatons are crushin' my mules. 1.2323 0.03697 198 161 28 9
5805 Yes, I suppose my Tinder photo was more from the Middle Ages. 1.2323 0.03971 155 124 26 5
5806 I'm sorry, you're a bit short. I'm used to long knights. 1.2323 0.04075 155 125 24 6
5807 You misunderstood my profile. I wanted a night out not a knight who is out of it. 1.2323 0.04276 155 127 20 8
5808 When I requested a lady of the night, I had something very different in mind. 1.2321 0.03867 168 135 27 6
5809 That's a lot of protection you've got on there. Is there anything you want to tell me? 1.2321 0.03958 168 136 25 7
5810 I said in the profile I"m a history buff. 1.2321 0.03579 168 132 33 3
5811 I think it's time for me to say, 'Thank you and good night.' 1.2321 0.03867 168 135 27 6
5812 Well, I certainly don't think knights in shining armor are supposed to suggest Dutch treat! 1.2321 0.03958 168 136 25 7
5813 It's too bad plastic straws have been outlawed 1.2321 0.03867 168 135 27 6
5814 Sorry, but I think we have different ideas about knights in shining armor. 1.2321 0.03678 168 133 31 4
5815 It's an organic blend,with a hint of Rustoleum,with a slightly impertinent corrugated iron finish. 1.2320 0.03768 181 146 28 7
5816 Do you joust here often? 1.2320 0.03515 181 143 34 4
5817 How did the hearing go today, honey? 1.2318 0.04036 151 121 25 5
5818 I don't htink that you should take rust so personally. 1.2318 0.04144 151 122 23 6
5819 I've finally met my knight in shining armor! 1.2318 0.03810 151 119 29 3
5820 Without my armor, I'm more the weak noisy type. 1.2317 0.04112 164 134 22 8
5821 I can't wait until this night is over. 1.2317 0.03730 164 130 30 4
5822 Aren't you carrying travelling in cognito a bit too far? 1.2317 0.04020 164 133 24 7
5823 Nope, I don't shine armor. 1.2317 0.03829 164 131 28 5
5824 What is the world does “dilly dilly” mean? 1.2317 0.03926 164 132 26 6
5825 Well, yes, I may have my defense mechanisms, but on the other hand I save a bundle on plastc surgery and dry cleaning 1.2317 0.04202 164 135 20 9
5826 I understand you need to request a straw now. 1.2317 0.03829 164 131 28 5
5827 This NOT what I meant when i suggested we have date night. 1.2316 0.03561 177 140 33 4
5828 When I asked you to be my knight in shinning armor I did not mean I wanted Prince Albert in a can! 1.2316 0.03737 177 142 29 6
5829 The chivalry is nice, but straws, really? 1.2316 0.03822 177 143 27 7
5830 You know Gerald, It seems as if your DNA research has gone a little too far. 1.2316 0.03650 177 141 31 5
5831 It’s kind of dark in here. Hard to tell if you’re really my Knight in Shining Armor. 1.2316 0.03650 177 141 31 5
5832 When I saw your profile picture, I was immediately drawn to your polished and gallent looks. 1.2316 0.03649 190 153 30 7
5833 I'm really not looking for a knight in shining armor type right now. 1.2313 0.04103 147 118 24 5
5834 So you heard' about 'A Knight on the Town' on what radio station? 1.2313 0.04324 147 120 20 7
5835 I can tell from the bouquet that I would like this wine. 1.2313 0.03988 147 117 26 4
5836 It's like Skype with the video off. 1.2313 0.03988 147 117 26 4
5837 With my ex is was really all about, "who ARE you, anyway?" 1.2312 0.04085 160 130 23 7
5838 I know someone put water in the wine because my helmet is rusted shut. 1.2312 0.03680 160 126 31 3
5839 So, will the sommelier be back to help with the visor? 1.2312 0.03785 160 127 29 4
5840 This was certainly not what I expected when we discussed a 'night on the town'" 1.2312 0.03609 173 137 32 4
5841 So, are you into retro now or is that just plain antique? 1.2312 0.03514 173 136 34 3
5842 What really happened. 1.2312 0.03619 186 149 31 6
5843 Hold it. You're looking for an affair de what? 1.2312 0.03393 199 158 36 5
5844 Well, this will be a night to remember. 1.2308 0.04052 156 126 24 6
5845 Would you rather have a Rob Roy? 1.2308 0.03842 156 124 28 4
5846 Chateau Lubricant" 1.2308 0.03658 169 134 31 4
5847 My place or yours?. My place has a can-opener and WD40. What do you have aside from a dungeon and lots of chains & whips? 1.2308 0.03908 182 149 24 9
5848 You've heard the rumors then? 1.2308 0.03356 195 154 37 4
5849 Small plates indeed. 1.2308 0.03320 182 142 38 2
5850 I suppose part of this is my fault, but I assumed you would know knight in shining armor is a euphemism, how are you going to eat? 1.2308 0.03842 156 124 28 4
5851 It has a “metallic flavor” you say? Gee, Arnie, I can’t imagine why. 1.2308 0.03461 169 132 35 2
5852 I have to say, you don’t look anything like your jdate picture. 1.2308 0.03842 156 124 28 4
5853 So, you think my safest sex outfit will damage your Kia? 1.2308 0.04025 169 138 23 8
5854 So if I ask for a straw it's because I hate turtles? I relate more to turtles than you'll ever know, Shannon. 1.2308 0.04025 169 138 23 8
5855 I should have known better than to go to a speed dating event that uses round tables. 1.2308 0.03829 182 148 26 8
5856 This is not what I expected when you invited me for a night out. 1.2308 0.04025 169 138 23 8
5857 Darn. I forgot my straw at the castle. 1.2308 0.03749 182 147 28 7
5858 I think you are worrying too much about spills. 1.2308 0.04174 143 115 23 5
5859 So your profile said medium build... 1.2308 0.03948 156 125 26 5
5860 When I said I wanted to go on a date with a chivalrous man, this is not what I meant 1.2303 0.03632 178 142 31 5
5861 I doubt this will fix your iron deficiency. 1.2303 0.04199 178 149 17 12
5862 I know you said you were a knight in shining armor, but really? 1.2303 0.03803 178 144 27 7
5863 Ought not Lancelot 1.2303 0.03543 178 141 33 4
5864 Mary, You said you wanted a knight in shining armor... And it shouldn't matter that my name is Becky... 1.2303 0.03885 178 145 25 8
5865 It's full-bodied with metallic notes, and pairs best with aged Gruyère. 1.2303 0.03803 178 144 27 7
5866 I'll just be straightforward about this. I use my lance a lot. 1.2303 0.03998 165 134 24 7
5867 It’s too bad you don’t like this table. It’s the only kind I can sit at. 1.2303 0.03710 165 131 30 4
5868 You've said some hurtful things, and I just felt self-protective. 1.2303 0.03710 165 131 30 4
5869 Because they say it's going to be an unusually bad Flu season. 1.2303 0.03998 165 134 24 7
5870 Come on! I didn't want my knight in shining armor to really be a knight in armor. 1.2303 0.04012 152 122 25 5
5871 Tricky Tinder 1.2303 0.04223 152 124 21 7
5872 It's corked, but I need you to tell them. 1.2303 0.04223 152 124 21 7
5873 Do you really need to be this defensive when I am mansplaining? 1.2299 0.03590 174 138 32 4
5874 Dracophobia is not a STD, in case you are wondering. 1.2299 0.03858 174 141 26 7
5875 I'd like to defend your honor. 1.2299 0.03590 174 138 32 4
5876 Clearly you are not my knight in shining armor. You can't drink. 1.2299 0.03400 174 136 36 2
5877 Yes, your plume is fluffy, but you may have taken your virginity oath a little too far. 1.2298 0.04156 161 132 21 8
5878 My helmet is an alternative to a wine aerator 1.2298 0.03764 161 128 29 4
5879 Your first time on WhiteKnightsOnly.com? 1.2298 0.03866 161 129 27 5
5880 That's a nice suit of armor. But I can still see your ankle bracelet, Sir Naughty. 1.2297 0.04298 148 121 20 7
5881 You take your night caps seriously. 1.2297 0.04190 148 120 22 6
5882 Can't say that I know Sir Loin of Beef Wellington, why do you ask? 1.2297 0.03964 148 118 26 4
5883 You really took your emotional armor to a new level this time... didn't you Albert? 1.2295 0.03650 183 147 30 6
5884 I don't want to embarrass you but do you mind if I ask for a straw? 1.2295 0.03965 183 151 22 10
5885 I know I said I was looking for a knight in shining armour but... 1.2295 0.03650 183 147 30 6
5886 If tonight goes well, tomorrow, I’ll introduce you to my dragon. 1.2294 0.03734 170 136 29 5
5887 It's nice, but it's not shiny enough. 1.2294 0.03443 170 133 35 2
5888 How do you feel about beer? 1.2294 0.03734 170 136 29 5
5889 Tinder said you'd be my knight in shinning armor, not a loser in tin foil. 1.2294 0.03916 170 138 25 7
5890 Well, what a knight this turned out to be. {Sigh} 1.2294 0.03734 170 136 29 5
5891 I’m sorry, but you’ve lost your shine. 1.2294 0.04004 170 139 23 8
5892 If you're not going to drink your wine, will you pass it over? 1.2293 0.04028 157 127 24 6
5893 This is an open and shut case. 1.2293 0.03820 157 125 28 4
5894 Sorry! Straws are no longer an option. 1.2293 0.04226 157 129 20 8
5895 I think it is too soon after your break up to start dating again. 1.2293 0.03820 157 125 28 4
5896 My profile did say I enjoyed going out as a knight, not at night. 1.2293 0.03926 157 126 26 5
5897 But enough about how perfect this table is. How do you feel about heraldry? 1.2292 0.03299 192 151 38 3
5898 I thought there was something odd about "Wine Knight" at this place. 1.2292 0.03215 192 150 40 2
5899 I feel like we're going two steps forward and then one step to the side. 1.2291 0.04025 179 148 21 10
5900 You must be the knight in shining armor I always dreamed for! 1.2291 0.03526 179 142 33 4
5901 Moira thought she was clear when suggesting they celebrate with a wine night out. 1.2291 0.03614 179 143 31 5
5902 Strictly speaking, women aren't allowed at the round table. 1.2291 0.03526 179 142 33 4
5903 When your profile said "time traveler" I thought it was a metaphor... 1.2291 0.03700 179 144 29 6
5904 Tell me about your latest dragon slaying. 1.2289 0.03788 166 133 28 5
5905 Adventurous and shy do fit your online profile. 1.2289 0.03976 166 135 24 7
5906 So.. how's the knight going? 1.2289 0.03590 166 131 32 3
5907 I'm a Supreme Court Candidate and want to cover my date behavior 20 years ago 1.2289 0.04243 166 138 18 10
5908 Lucille never mentioned you were part of “#himtoo...” 1.2289 0.03883 166 134 26 6
5909 What kind of credible story can you tell yourself about why we are together? 1.2289 0.03381 166 129 36 1
5910 Online dating in 2018. 1.2289 0.03715 201 165 26 10
5911 Wow, your armor looks older than your picture...how long have you been on KnightMatch.com? 1.2288 0.04198 153 125 21 7
5912 You look just like your Tinder photo. 1.2288 0.04095 153 124 23 6
5913 Fine - how would YOU define 'amicable'? 1.2288 0.03879 153 122 27 4
5914 Actions speak louder than words. 1.2287 0.03504 188 150 33 5
5915 Can't we have Date Night without a 'K,' like everyone else? 1.2286 0.03752 175 141 28 6
5916 Well...……….my friend did say that your were like a knight in shining armor. 1.2286 0.03663 175 140 30 5
5917 Gertrude wanted a night she will never forget, now she's not so sure. 1.2286 0.03752 175 141 28 6
5918 What's with the face? Your profile said you wanted chivalry. 1.2286 0.03923 175 143 24 8
5919 No, it’s a different nightly special. 1.2284 0.03844 162 130 27 5
5920 I'm going to explain what 'Live Crabs' means one more time. 1.2284 0.03533 162 127 33 2
5921 I thought a blind date might be different. 1.2284 0.03943 162 131 25 6
5922 All day long I felt it would be a knight to remember. 1.2284 0.03533 162 127 33 2
5923 The ad said "A night in shining amour" 1.2284 0.04039 162 132 23 7
5924 More like a knight in dull armour. 1.2283 0.03713 184 149 28 7
5925 Dorothy's date reminded her of an old friend 1.2282 0.04579 149 125 14 10
5926 As poetic as it sounds, I'm looking for something more than Friends with Courtly Love. 1.2282 0.04054 149 120 24 5
5927 Didn't you escape from a museum? 1.2282 0.04164 149 121 22 6
5928 I SHOULD HAVE BROUGHT MY SILVER POLISH 1.2282 0.03824 149 118 28 3
5929 I liked you better when you used to just clam up. 1.2281 0.03895 171 139 25 7
5930 Oh well, once more unto the breach. 1.2279 0.04299 136 110 21 5
5931 I like the chivalry you older guys are so good at. 1.2278 0.03903 158 127 26 5
5932 The Tin Man came down with a case of rust. 1.2278 0.03799 158 126 28 4
5933 It may not fit with your self-image but I still think a straw is the best solution. 1.2278 0.04105 158 129 22 7
5934 You’re supposed to ride in on a white horse, not hide your face. 1.2278 0.03580 158 124 32 2
5935 Really, Howard? This is what you thought I meant by date night? 1.2278 0.03903 158 127 26 5
5936 When I said I was looking for a "Knight in Shining Armor",I didn't mean literally... 1.2278 0.04202 158 130 20 8
5937 It’s all part of the swordfish special. 1.2278 0.03846 180 147 25 8
5938 They promised me a night on the town. This is not what I expected." -- Linda Stetson, Millis, M 1.2278 0.03926 180 148 23 9
5939 I'm your wish come true from your last birthday cake. 1.2278 0.03419 180 142 35 3
5940 Me too, Christine. Me too. 1.2275 0.03862 167 135 26 6
5941 Now, that's extreme willpower. 1.2275 0.03768 167 134 28 5
5942 This isn't exactly what I meant by a date night. 1.2275 0.03768 167 134 28 5
5943 You are doing important work, but I still think #Knight-Errant-MeToo is just too long. 1.2275 0.03469 167 131 34 2
5944 It's okay, Carlo. This bistro hasn't had a Mafia-hit in years. 1.2275 0.03955 167 136 24 7
5945 So, you've been here before? 1.2275 0.03768 167 134 28 5
5946 I don’t like rainy days. 1.2275 0.03768 167 134 28 5
5947 When I put in the ad that I was looking for a knight in shining armor, I was hoping for something a little less literal. 1.2275 0.03955 167 136 24 7
5948 Let's get out of here. I haven't Camelot in ages. 1.2275 0.03862 167 135 26 6
5949 This isn’t what I had in mind when I said I wanted a date night. 1.2275 0.03488 189 151 33 5
5950 I'm sorry. I thought your armor would be a bit more shiny. 1.2275 0.03488 189 151 33 5
5951 They did say black tie optional. 1.2273 0.03462 176 139 34 3
5952 So when is your next tournament? 1.2273 0.03965 154 124 25 5
5953 I just wish you had mentioned that we were going to a Halloween Party, after meeting for cocktails! 1.2273 0.04071 154 125 23 6
5954 I've heard of people putting on armor when they go on Internet dates, but this is ridiculous. 1.2273 0.03903 176 144 24 8
5955 I knew I'd like you when I saw your picture on Match.com. I love a man in uniform! 1.2273 0.03745 154 122 29 3
5956 Gladys, I am having a Spartacus moment. 1.2273 0.04174 154 126 21 7
5957 Let's agree that I get the house and car and you get the kids. 1.2273 0.03644 176 141 30 5
5958 Well, yes, I have been looking for my Knight in Shining Armor but .... 1.2273 0.04174 154 126 21 7
5959 I read on a blind-date advice-column that I should come prepared for anything. 1.2273 0.03168 176 136 40 0
5960 I suppose the chastity belt means we’ll keep it to this? 1.2273 0.03732 176 142 28 6
5961 It is a roundtable, but the similarity ends there Mr. Arthur. 1.2273 0.03554 176 140 32 4
5962 This isn't what I had in mind when I sent for a mail-order husband! 1.2273 0.04174 154 126 21 7
5963 You didn't say anything in your profile about leaving a dragon to bleed to death. 1.2273 0.03857 154 123 27 4
5964 So, Bedevere, what do you do? 1.2270 0.03773 185 151 26 8
5965 SMDH, The lengths I have to go to to find one chivalrous guy this city! 1.2270 0.03723 163 130 29 4
5966 Wink, wink! 1.2270 0.03823 163 131 27 5
5967 Don’t worry. Cupid won’t be able to get through that! 1.2270 0.03620 163 129 31 3
5968 I agree; this vintage definitely has a steely finish. 1.2270 0.03823 163 131 27 5
5969 I say, would you have some wd40 I might use? 1.2270 0.03921 163 132 25 6
5970 If you think this will protect you against my barbs, you’re wrong again. 1.2270 0.03816 141 111 28 2
5971 Um, I think you read my O.K. Cupid post too literally. 1.2270 0.04195 141 114 22 5
5972 Oenophiles of the round table - merlot convention. 1.2268 0.03506 194 156 32 6
5973 I use WD-40 as lube". 1.2267 0.03695 172 138 29 5
5974 My apologies, Fran. In the Yelp reviews, they said this restaurant served mead. 1.2267 0.03695 172 138 29 5
5975 I'm battling a sexual harassment problem." 1.2267 0.03602 172 137 31 4
5976 This was not what I pictured when you said you would be my knight in shining armor. 1.2267 0.03961 172 141 23 8
5977 No, I didn't mean it literally when I said I wished you'd to be my knight in shining armor. 1.2267 0.03786 172 139 27 6
5978 Wow this is quite the night 1.2265 0.03663 181 146 29 6
5979 Would you like some dessert, mon armour! 1.2265 0.03984 181 150 21 10
5980 I told you...I hoped chivalry would lead to something more intimate! 1.2264 0.03671 159 126 30 3
5981 Let’s face it, we’re too old for nightclubs. 1.2264 0.03882 159 128 26 5
5982 You call THIS a Renaissance Faire! 1.2264 0.03671 159 126 30 3
5983 You wanted a night to shine in your honor? 1.2264 0.04081 159 130 22 7
5984 You knew my mom. Late December, back in '63. 1.2264 0.03882 159 128 26 5
5985 Did you forget to order a straw again? 1.2264 0.03671 159 126 30 3
5986 When I said I wanted a night cap, I didn’t mean this 1.2263 0.03551 190 153 31 6
5987 Another night on the town. 1.2262 0.03651 168 134 30 4
5988 I'm sorry, Gail, but you're not quite what I'm looking for. 1.2262 0.03933 168 137 24 7
5989 I understand why you said your personality is challenging... 1.2260 0.03799 177 144 26 7
5990 Oh wow, my knight in rusting armor has arrived. 1.2260 0.03799 177 144 26 7
5991 They call me Gary the Weaselheart. 1.2260 0.03799 177 144 26 7
5992 Don't give me that look, I never said I was into role-playing 1.2260 0.03444 177 140 34 3
5993 I didn't mean that vintage. 1.2258 0.03346 186 147 36 3
5994 Do you always need to wear your costume for Halloween for the whole month of October? 1.2258 0.04535 155 131 13 11
5995 A bib just won't cut it for me. 1.2256 0.03255 195 154 38 3
5996 When I said I was looking for my 'knight in shining armor,' this isn't what I meant. 1.2256 0.03994 164 134 23 7
5997 You know ...I just don't think I'm quite ready for this. 1.2256 0.04087 164 135 21 8
5998 You look a little bit different in your Tinder profile 1.2256 0.03900 164 133 25 6
5999 I was expecting a nice night out. Why is this knight different from all other knights? Sorry but I just didn't have time to do the laundry this week. 1.2256 0.03994 164 134 23 7
6000 Doesn’t look so shiny to me! 1.2254 0.03766 173 140 27 6
6001 Sorry Ethel, I was just jousting! 1.2254 0.03854 173 141 25 7
6002 The dating service did say you likened yourself as a knight in shinning armor, but don't you think this is a bit much? 1.2254 0.03583 173 138 31 4
6003 I must say, you look different without your armor. 1.2254 0.03488 173 137 33 3
6004 Mother said I could have dinner with you if I wore this 1.2254 0.03766 173 140 27 6
6005 My relationships weren't working out so I decided to take the knight-in-shining-armour metaphor to the next level. 1.2254 0.03583 173 138 31 4
6006 I understand you're the same as all other knights but would like to be different. Let's get started. 1.2253 0.03474 182 145 33 4
6007 So you are my knight in wining armor? 1.2253 0.03808 182 149 25 8
6008 Fine, but I’m not into a one knight sit either. 1.2252 0.03894 151 121 26 4
6009 What a fine Knight we're having. 1.2252 0.04114 151 123 22 6
6010 Globbb blugrad bylad bjjedu! 1.2251 0.03904 191 159 21 11
6011 What a crumby joint. Everywhere else I get a straw 1.2251 0.03207 191 150 39 2
6012 Don't worry. Knights always carry straws. 1.2250 0.03757 160 128 28 4
6013 Of course, you realize that I have unrealistically high expectations. 1.2250 0.03757 160 128 28 4
6014 Actually no, I don't find it particularly metallic. 1.2250 0.03757 160 128 28 4
6015 Look, it's not that I'm not flattered. But the Maitre D' only complimented my necklace. You didn't have to gore him. 1.2250 0.03541 160 126 32 2
6016 When I asked for something aged from the Loire Valley, I didn't mean for company. 1.2250 0.03960 160 130 24 6
6017 Sorry, straws are bad for wildlife. 1.2249 0.03912 169 138 24 7
6018 You can't expect the armor to be "shining" on a civil servant's salary. 1.2249 0.03632 169 135 30 4
6019 How long does it take to get the results of your HIV test? 1.2249 0.03534 169 134 32 3
6020 Finally! drinking wine with my knight in shining armor!!! 1.2249 0.03728 169 136 28 5
6021 Your armor was looked much shinier on Tinder. 1.2249 0.04001 169 139 22 8
6022 Everybody always swipes knight. 1.2249 0.03632 169 135 30 4
6023 I was 33 when I came out of the closet. 1.2249 0.04001 169 139 22 8
6024 She took a nice knight out and had a nice night out. 1.2249 0.03821 169 137 26 6
6025 Last week it was the Pirate outfit. This week it’s the suit of armor. I just can’t take you anywhere! 1.2247 0.03863 178 146 24 8
6026 Thanks, I guess, but I didn’t need to be rescued. We were just frolicking in the autumn mist. 1.2247 0.04024 178 148 20 10
6027 No, you should not ask for a straw. 1.2247 0.03695 178 144 28 6
6028 Chivalry shall die if they don't bring me a straw. 1.2246 0.03498 187 150 32 5
6029 So the algorithm on the dating sight has a sense of humor or maybe I shouldn’t Have asked for my night in shining armor 1.2245 0.03398 196 157 34 5
6030 There's no such thing as a designated jouster. 1.2244 0.03813 156 125 27 4
6031 Shiny enough for you??? 1.2244 0.03589 156 123 31 2
6032 Well, I wouldn't describe the bouquet as "tinny." 1.2244 0.03813 156 125 27 4
6033 You know it's spelled with a 'K', right? 1.2242 0.03782 165 133 27 5
6034 Knights aren't safe anymore, milady. 1.2242 0.03782 165 133 27 5
6035 Would you like a straw with you wine? 1.2242 0.03476 165 130 33 2
6036 I find it hard not to bring my work home with me. 1.2242 0.03683 165 132 29 4
6037 I think we need to go over "dinner casual" again 1.2241 0.03747 174 141 27 6
6038 You're right - it is a Round Table. 1.2241 0.03565 174 139 31 4
6039 Yes, you said you'd have mail for me. 1.2241 0.03834 174 142 25 7
6040 I have a serious shellfish allergy. 1.2241 0.04004 174 144 21 9
6041 If you like my blonde pony, wait till ya see my white horse...” 1.2241 0.03471 174 138 33 3
6042 Let's get this straight, my name is not Guineviere. It's Gwendolyn!! 1.2241 0.03565 174 139 31 4
6043 I agree, I didn’t look like this in my online dating photo. 1.2241 0.03920 174 143 23 8
6044 Not the kind of romantic night I had imagined. 1.2241 0.03834 174 142 25 7
6045 I'm just not sure if I'm looking for shining armor right now. 1.2240 0.03867 183 151 23 9
6046 so what do you do for a living sir??? 1.2240 0.03789 183 150 25 8
6047 Sorry, Bud, but I have no desire to get medieval with you! 1.2239 0.04190 134 108 22 4
6048 Tinder: Destroying High Expectations since 2009. 1.2237 0.04090 152 124 22 6
6049 Have I ever given you any sarcastic remark about this ridiculous vintage retro lamp? Have I? 1.2237 0.04090 152 124 22 6
6050 Don Quixote? Or prepared for the MeToo mob? 1.2237 0.04090 152 124 22 6
6051 I am besotted by your shining armor. 1.2237 0.03871 152 122 26 4
6052 No, even if you are my boss, this will not convince me to refer to you as “sir.” 1.2236 0.04131 161 133 20 8
6053 A knight at night. Let's meet for breakfast next time.... 1.2236 0.03736 161 129 28 4
6054 Knights are forever without you. 1.2236 0.03838 161 130 26 5
6055 No, what I said was that I was looking forward to a date NIGHT. 1.2236 0.04035 161 132 22 7
6056 Ok,you are my knight in shining armour. Now will you take that off? 1.2235 0.04066 170 141 20 9
6057 Would You Prefer A Straw ? 1.2235 0.03891 170 139 24 7
6058 My battle horse takes up a lot of my time. 1.2235 0.03801 170 138 26 6
6059 Can chivalry just die already so I can go home and watch Queer Eye? 1.2235 0.03613 170 136 30 4
6060 I should have known that the Crusades would eventually make consensual relations problematic. 1.2235 0.03980 170 140 22 8
6061 To be honest, I'd prefer you open the car door for me. 1.2235 0.03708 170 137 28 5
6062 I always wanted a knight in shining armor, but... 1.2235 0.03590 179 144 30 5
6063 I know you are trying to be my night in shining armor, but really Lou, actually preferred the Tarzan get up! 1.2235 0.03676 179 145 28 6
6064 Could you try shining? 1.2235 0.03590 179 144 30 5
6065 No, I clearly recall saying "Nights in White Satin" was my favorite song. 1.2234 0.03719 188 154 26 8
6066 Hard times aside, this isn't what they mean by getting a thicker skin. 1.2234 0.03482 188 151 32 5
6067 Well, at least I'm enjoying our Knight out." 1.2230 0.03814 148 118 27 3
6068 It has a slightly metallic mouthfeel. 1.2229 0.04200 157 130 19 8
6069 So you’re a white knight? Republican or Democrat ? 1.2229 0.03897 157 127 25 5
6070 I know this is a blind date, but you're really going to far. 1.2229 0.04101 157 129 21 7
6071 My profile said I was looking for my knight in shinning armor, at best you’re sparkly. 1.2229 0.03897 157 127 25 5
6072 I'm glad the suit is acceptable without the tie. 1.2229 0.03897 157 127 25 5
6073 I'm beginning to feel I 'm on a lunch date with the Tin Man from Wizard of Oz. 1.2229 0.03857 166 135 25 6
6074 How can you be unhappy? You said you wanted a knight around town." 1.2229 0.03547 175 140 31 4
6075 Would it bother you if I ask for a straw? 1.2229 0.03900 175 144 23 8
6076 When they told me you were a militant lesbian 1.2229 0.03983 175 145 21 9
6077 Ironic humor is passé. But watching you struggle to drink wine is good classic slapstick that can’t fail to entertain. 1.2229 0.03638 175 141 29 5
6078 I’m from the 1700s I Live in a museum 1.2229 0.03728 175 142 27 6
6079 Yes, it's my first attempt at a one night stand, how about you? 1.2228 0.03441 184 147 33 4
6080 Here’s looking at you, kid? I can’t even see you through this damn thing. 1.2228 0.03526 184 148 31 5
6081 Trick or treat? 1.2228 0.03609 184 149 29 6
6082 A night with “A Knight in Shining Armor “ really? 1.2222 0.03715 162 130 28 4
6083 Are you Jousting anytime soon,or just rusting up? 1.2222 0.03817 162 131 26 5
6084 I send out unwanted messages to people. They call me, "SPAM in a can". 1.2222 0.03503 162 128 32 2
6085 Your profile says you want a chivalrous date. 1.2222 0.03689 171 138 28 5
6086 You worry too much! 1.2222 0.03871 171 140 24 7
6087 I'm sure you said "a night in shining armor" 1.2222 0.03624 189 154 28 7
6088 I thought you guys drank Bud Light. 1.2222 0.03658 180 146 28 6
6089 Yeah? Well, you also mentioned long walks in the rain, romantic Sundays cuddled by the fire, and 110% honesty. Was all that, as you put it, 'Just some crap people say'? 1.2222 0.03824 180 148 24 8
6090 For God's sake Henry, I thought you'd at least wear your white satin. 1.2222 0.03594 171 137 30 4
6091 I like a full bodied wine, a well rounded woman, and a well rounded table. 1.2222 0.03916 162 132 24 6
6092 When your profile said you’d be my knight in shining armor I didn’t think you meant it literally. 1.2222 0.03817 162 131 26 5
6093 I didn't know what else to do with the leftovers from my Go Fund Me campaign. 1.2222 0.04013 162 133 22 7
6094 Why did you ask me OUT if you're going to stay IN ? 1.2222 0.03735 153 122 28 3
6095 Don't tell me, Bernard - you're having a #HETOO moment. 1.2222 0.03996 144 116 24 4
6096 Yes....you did promise a good night! 1.2222 0.03503 162 128 32 2
6097 Silly me. I thought “Sexy Knights Dating Service” was just a typo. 1.2222 0.03689 171 138 28 5
6098 i am pretty sure this is not what i meant when i said i wanted a night out 1.2222 0.03959 153 124 24 5
6099 Sorry, this restaurant doesn't offer straws any more. 1.2222 0.03594 171 137 30 4
6100 Knight in shining armor? This wasn’t quite what I had in mind. 1.2222 0.03689 171 138 28 5
6101 That won't save you 1.2222 0.04233 144 118 20 6
6102 Listen Leon, after 23 years already it isn’t so shiney 1.2222 0.03781 171 139 26 6
6103 Thanks for the wine, but on second thought, I don’t need a knight in shining armor. 1.2216 0.03485 194 157 31 6
6104 Oh,did I say I was looking for a knight in shining armor? 1.2216 0.03407 194 156 33 5
6105 We're in a nice restaurant. Show some couth and take your hat off. 1.2216 0.03337 185 147 35 3
6106 The knight in shining armor fits your online profile, but, I asked for a Chardonnay." 1.2216 0.03620 176 142 29 5
6107 A little tinny for me. 1.2216 0.03795 176 144 25 7
6108 Shouldn't I be the one wearing the armor in this climate? 1.2216 0.03529 176 141 31 4
6109 I know you're concerned about STD's but aren't you over doing it a little. 1.2216 0.03836 167 136 25 6
6110 No, you’re not the first knight I’ve met on Tinder. 1.2216 0.03836 167 136 25 6
6111 You're the best, honey. You really know how to help me let my guard down. 1.2216 0.03836 167 136 25 6
6112 Date A Knight didn't infer you leave your armor on. 1.2215 0.03549 158 125 31 2
6113 So tell me. How did the iron chastity belt work out? 1.2215 0.03769 158 127 27 4
6114 No need to be so defensive dear 1.2215 0.04078 158 130 21 7
6115 Forgive my tears, but when you ordered the cobbler, I couldn't help picturing him squat on the floor, doubting my whereabouts, hammering away at those old shoes. 1.2215 0.04023 149 121 23 5
6116 But you said you wanted a knight in shiny armor. 1.2211 0.03683 190 156 26 8
6117 Did you really think I asked for a Wine Knight? 1.2210 0.03467 181 145 32 4
6118 After dinner sex is difficult while I'm Sir Lancelot! 1.2210 0.03467 181 145 32 4
6119 I get the feeling this is a rebound date. 1.2210 0.03554 181 146 30 5
6120 Yes, it's true. I once said, I wouldn't go out on a knight like this! 1.2210 0.03805 181 149 24 8
6121 I think you misunderstood it when I said "one night only date" 1.2210 0.03640 181 147 28 6
6122 You look nothing like your e-armory profile picture. 1.2210 0.03640 181 147 28 6
6123 I'm on call, and there's protestors everywhere. 1.2209 0.03761 172 140 26 6
6124 This wasn't what I had in mind when I said I wanted to meet my knight in shining armor. 1.2209 0.03670 172 139 28 5
6125 I had sex with your mother and sister. 1.2209 0.03938 172 142 22 8
6126 Yes, it keeps mosquitoes away, but also makes it difficult to enjoy your drink! 1.2209 0.03479 172 137 32 3
6127 Well, I agree, you do really know how to show a gal a knight out. 1.2209 0.03796 163 132 26 5
6128 Here's not looking at you,kid. 1.2209 0.03484 163 129 32 2
6129 So, in the cab, on my way to the restaurant tonight, I kept asking myself, how does one tell a knight in shining armor that he may not be, after all, the person one's been looking for. 1.2209 0.03591 163 130 30 3
6130 “It’s not resting bitch face; I just can’t penetrate your armor” 1.2209 0.03796 163 132 26 5
6131 So this is your idea of a night on the town! 1.2209 0.03796 163 132 26 5
6132 Be assured, my chivalry is unheralded! 1.2209 0.03796 163 132 26 5
6133 Drink to me only with thine eyes. 1.2208 0.04146 154 127 20 7
6134 When you emailed from the website that you would be my 'knight in shining armor,' I expected something else. 1.2208 0.03826 154 124 26 4
6135 Your helmet for me is a sign of our ongoing intimacy issues. 1.2207 0.04091 145 118 22 5
6136 It doesn't matter how you dress, you're still not it. 1.2205 0.03469 195 158 31 6
6137 You might want to try using this online dating site again using something other than Windows v.3.11 1.2204 0.03655 186 152 27 7
6138 When I asked for my knight in shining armour I didn’t mean this 1.2204 0.03492 186 150 31 5
6139 I said we would have a date knight and here I am! 1.2204 0.03810 186 154 23 9
6140 Do you need a metal straw for your wine? 1.2203 0.03602 177 143 29 5
6141 Do you know where I can get steel toe shoes that will match my suit ? 1.2203 0.03511 177 142 31 4
6142 Am not really much of a beach person... sand and rust wreck the suit. 1.2203 0.03860 177 146 23 8
6143 Oh. You meant Knight shift. 1.2202 0.03524 168 134 31 3
6144 Don't be so grumpy. This Bordeaux, with its hints of tempered steel and floral pepperiness, is a perfect foil for the squab. 1.2202 0.03624 168 135 29 4
6145 Late December back in '63 As I remember, what a nkight 1.2202 0.03624 168 135 29 4
6146 You said you wanted a night on the town. 1.2202 0.03624 168 135 29 4
6147 I don’t care what your profile page says - you’re not my knight in shining armor! 1.2202 0.03721 168 136 27 5
6148 Yes, your profile does say “Prince Charming”, but I wasn’t expecting the whole “Night in Shining Armor” thing. 1.2202 0.03422 168 133 33 2
6149 So, have you had a lot of luck meeting guys through Jousters Only? 1.2202 0.03908 168 138 23 7
6150 Get Downy fabric softener if you want a second date. 1.2201 0.03748 159 128 27 4
6151 Just don't try to kiss me good knight. 1.2201 0.03748 159 128 27 4
6152 What's all this you ask? Well, I'm sure you've heard--it's a dangerous time for men in America. Anyway, how do you like the wine? I prefer beer myself. 1.2201 0.04246 159 133 17 9
6153 Well that...and I have a plastic straw dependency. 1.2201 0.03853 159 129 25 5
6154 I know I said "Man up!", but aren't you taking this a bit too far? 1.2201 0.04054 159 131 21 7
6155 Your profile was forwarded to eChivalry.com 1.2201 0.03530 159 126 31 2
6156 So, OK, you got the Gehry suit at a steal. That doesn't make you any more magnetic. 1.2201 0.03748 159 128 27 4
6157 So, your ad meant the more literal meaning of ‘Guarded’? 1.2201 0.03955 159 130 23 6
6158 I must have misunderstood - I thought you were looking for your knight in shining armor. 1.2200 0.03768 150 120 27 3
6159 I get that you're non-binary, but you're still paying for the wine. 1.2200 0.03999 150 122 23 5
6160 Are you gonna take that thing off, or do I have to keep guessing who you are? 1.2200 0.04109 150 123 21 6
6161 What’s the matter? Isn’t my armor shiny enough? 1.2199 0.03512 191 155 30 6
6162 Not shiny enough" 1.2199 0.03512 191 155 30 6
6163 You better not have a white horse out in the parking lot 1.2198 0.03705 182 149 26 7
6164 You looked different in your Tinder photos. 1.2198 0.03450 182 146 32 4
6165 Think they have paper straws here? 1.2197 0.03741 173 141 26 6
6166 He could use some polish,” Peg thinks 1.2197 0.03363 173 137 34 2
6167 There must have been a mistake, I asked for a Knight in SHINING armor. 1.2197 0.03650 173 140 28 5
6168 I'm not that caustic. 1.2197 0.03461 173 138 32 3
6169 Hmph. Looks more dull than shining. 1.2197 0.03557 173 139 30 4
6170 It's a bit heavy for my liking. 1.2197 0.03650 173 140 28 5
6171 I could be your Guinevere. 1.2197 0.03741 173 141 26 6
6172 I know FEMA has its problems, but..... 1.2197 0.03741 173 141 26 6
6173 It seems I should change that whole “knight in shining armour” illusion to the new “fragile, paranoid sot” reality. 1.2195 0.04062 164 136 20 8
6174 This is my first experience on K-Date. 1.2195 0.04153 164 137 18 9
6175 Princess? You were supposed to be the dragon.” 1.2195 0.03968 164 135 22 7
6176 You’re right. Sometimes a night on the town can be SO disappointing! 1.2195 0.03675 164 132 28 4
6177 I’m more of a shiny Cadillac kind of girl. 1.2195 0.03571 164 131 30 3
6178 Your going to need a funnel if you intend to drink that wine. 1.2195 0.03873 164 134 24 6
6179 Your online profile said you worked nights! 1.2195 0.03873 164 134 24 6
6180 You said you wanted a date knight to remember 1.2195 0.03775 164 133 26 5
6181 When you said you would be my knight in shining armor I thought you were being figurative. 1.2194 0.03376 196 158 33 5
6182 They say plating is very important at classy restaurants like these. 1.2194 0.03601 196 161 27 8
6183 So, your last relationship was a bad breakup? 1.2194 0.03692 155 124 28 3
6184 Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can’t figure out what from. 1.2194 0.03804 155 125 26 4
6185 You’ve taken this “Knight on the town” a bit far Lancelot 1.2194 0.03913 155 126 24 5
6186 I thought your eHarmony entry for 'Profession' was a typo for 'ADvisor.' 1.2194 0.03913 155 126 24 5
6187 Ooooooo.... How far is your castle? 1.2194 0.03458 155 122 32 1
6188 I'm campaigning on a Medieval platform. 1.2194 0.03692 155 124 28 3
6189 I wouldn't drink that wine it can make you rust. 1.2193 0.03557 187 152 29 6
6190 Chivalry's not dead after all. 1.2191 0.03583 178 144 29 5
6191 Com'on, Margaret, is that the best Guinevere costume you could come up with for the ball? 1.2191 0.03671 178 145 27 6
6192 I thought you said a night of wine with a charmer. 1.2189 0.03506 169 135 31 3
6193 Yes my dear. I am your knight tonite 1.2189 0.03887 169 139 23 7
6194 Darling, I feel you as cold as iron 1.2189 0.03701 169 137 27 5
6195 I think you may be taking this whole “me too” thing too far. 1.2189 0.03795 169 138 25 6
6196 ...anyways, we really needed someone who could bring the left and the right together, but Henry VIII was just too divisive. So how are things in DC these days? 1.2188 0.03831 160 130 25 5
6197 Just because I don’t like the wine you chose doesn’t mean you have to go medieval on me. 1.2188 0.03496 192 156 30 6
6198 I've gotta start listening to Susan when she tells me not to go on blind dates. 1.2188 0.03727 160 129 27 4
6199 Well, are you going to say anything or do I just get to stare at your steely-eyed face? 1.2188 0.03727 160 129 27 4
6200 Are we just jousting back and forth here? 1.2188 0.03510 160 127 31 2
6201 Sorry, I think you are too metal for me. 1.2188 0.03417 192 155 32 5
6202 Just wanted to ensure that everything you’d say would bounce off me. 1.2188 0.03573 192 157 28 7
6203 Is this your idea of a night out on the town? 1.2185 0.04085 151 124 21 6
6204 One can't be too careful with all this *MeToo-ism going around. 1.2184 0.03810 174 143 24 7
6205 No, I don't own a horse. I'm just dressing for dangerous times. 1.2184 0.03539 174 140 30 4
6206 M'Lady, I'm told it has a nice nose, but alas, how would I know? 1.2183 0.03361 197 159 33 5
6207 Again, you've taken me too literally. 1.2182 0.03755 165 134 26 5
6208 Days of wine and neuroses. 1.2182 0.03655 165 133 28 4
6209 No thank you. I don't joust. 1.2181 0.03376 188 151 33 4
6210 I don't think that King Arthur had a blonde pony tail. 1.2179 0.03890 156 127 24 5
6211 This is the last time I ask for a date night.... 1.2179 0.03995 156 128 22 6
6212 When you asked me to join you for a 'Goodnight, Night Cap' I had something slightly different in mind. 1.2179 0.03476 179 144 31 4
6213 I don't know who you are, but your taste in wine is impeccable ! 1.2179 0.03820 179 148 23 8
6214 I'm finding middle age burdensome in ways I hadn't anticipated. 1.2177 0.03678 147 117 28 2
6215 "Give us a straw, Luv." 1.2176 0.03682 170 138 27 5
6216 Standard issue to Republicans inside the beltway. 1.2176 0.04042 170 142 19 9
6217 How can they expect me to drink this without a straw? Damn fools! 1.2176 0.03682 170 138 27 5
6218 You know, it should explode on your palate and not your body 1.2176 0.03682 170 138 27 5
6219 Order a daiquiri instead if you like-- or you could just ask for a straw. 1.2176 0.03775 170 139 25 6
6220 I've seen what Gordon Ramsey can do with shish kebab 1.2174 0.03328 184 147 34 3
6221 Well, now that you mention it, going out for a night on the town CAN be taken two ways. 1.2174 0.03491 161 128 31 2
6222 So I said to her, look, Eileen, you can cook your green beans to mush if you want. But I’m not going to eat them. 1.2171 0.03790 175 144 24 7
6223 I'm not going to spend the night. 1.2171 0.03426 175 140 32 3
6224 You know, Ashley Madison has privacy controls now... 1.2171 0.03426 175 140 32 3
6225 So, why do YOU want to be my knight in shining armor? 1.2171 0.03521 175 141 30 4
6226 ...not exactly a knight in shining armor! 1.2171 0.03724 152 122 27 3
6227 So, you literally are a Knight in shining armor!?! 1.2171 0.04166 152 126 19 7
6228 Well Cheryl, I'm either your knight in shining armor or excessively guarded. Tell me, are these glasses half empty or half full? 1.2171 0.03840 152 123 25 4
6229 Date Night... in shining armor 1.2171 0.03951 152 124 23 5
6230 Yea, well I totally thought the hair metal reference in your profile was about music. 1.2169 0.03533 166 133 30 3
6231 I'm worried about the valet. 1.2168 0.03987 143 116 23 4
6232 Sorry if you were expecting to meet a princess. I'm about the farthest thing from one and frankly, I don't need saving. Just more wine please. 1.2167 0.03459 180 145 31 4
6233 I propose a toast to a bodice-ripping good time.” 1.2167 0.03178 180 142 37 1
6234 I thought dinner with a knight in shining armor would be much more exciting. 1.2167 0.03634 180 147 27 6
6235 Linda, I love you but I'm not in love with you. 1.2167 0.03718 180 148 25 7
6236 Your profile said chivalry, not cosplay. 1.2166 0.03761 157 127 26 4
6237 Didn't you read my profile ? 1.2166 0.03868 157 128 24 5
6238 'Yes, and it's transgender, too." 1.2166 0.03868 157 128 24 5
6239 Not what I thought you meant when you said we would have a night on the town. 1.2166 0.03972 157 129 22 6
6240 Well, my mother said I was HER knight in shining armor... 1.2166 0.03868 157 128 24 5
6241 It's the only way I can get through dinner without attracting the angry mob. 1.2166 0.04073 157 130 20 7
6242 I’m on a diet. When this thing rattles, I’m done. 1.2164 0.03369 171 136 33 2
6243 ...I thought your profile said you were looking for A Knight in Shining Armour 1.2164 0.03755 171 140 25 6
6244 #TFW your blind date orders a bendy straw for his wine 1.2164 0.03567 171 138 29 4
6245 Sure, you talk a good game, but how am I supposed to know if you’re my knight in shining armor? 1.2162 0.03899 148 120 24 4
6246 What - you don’t think “suit” and “jacket and tie” are synonymous?!” 1.2162 0.03899 148 120 24 4
6247 I know haunting castles is your passion, but can we just not talk about work for one night? 1.2162 0.03899 148 120 24 4
6248 I guess “No” really means “Good luck trying!” 1.2162 0.04128 148 122 20 6
6249 Boomer Damsel in Distress. 1.2160 0.03986 162 134 21 7
6250 It doesn't compare well at all to your other 1694's. 1.2160 0.03889 162 133 23 6
6251 Honey, we have to rethink this marriage...the nights just aren't like they used to be .... 1.2160 0.03789 162 132 25 5
6252 I suppose you're not really looking for a 'partner in crime' either? 1.2159 0.03684 176 144 26 6
6253 J-Date? No, milady, I'm from K-Date. 1.2159 0.03312 176 140 34 2
6254 Sooooooo.....swiping right might have been a mistake! 1.2159 0.03312 176 140 34 2
6255 Do you THINK that I wear a condom? 1.2159 0.03503 176 142 30 4
6256 And when we leave, don’t even think about opening that door. 1.2159 0.03503 176 142 30 4
6257 You think he’s hard to find? I may not be as polished as most, but try meeting a sleeping beauty. 1.2159 0.03595 176 143 28 5
6258 But when I said "Je cherche l'amour..." 1.2158 0.03923 139 112 24 3
6259 So Sorry. I was using Match.com to find someone I might parry. 1.2158 0.04054 139 113 22 4
6260 You’re my knight in shining armor, but you don’t have to take it so literally. 1.2158 0.03426 190 154 31 5
6261 Alas, they have rejected my coins. 1.2158 0.03737 190 158 23 9
6262 The brochure said that my date would be from the future. 1.2157 0.03585 153 122 29 2
6263 'How the hell do I know if it will rust?' 1.2156 0.03714 167 136 26 5
6264 This seems like a bit of an extreme way to lose twenty pounds 1.2156 0.03714 167 136 26 5
6265 ‘’Yes, as a matter of fact I did vote to in favor of Kavanaugh’s confirmation. Why do you ask? Submitted by Mark Sappir - msappir@bellatlantic.net 1.2156 0.03810 167 137 24 6
6266 I know my dating profile said I was looking for my knight in shining armor...but how do I know I'm not being catfished? 1.2156 0.04084 167 140 18 9
6267 This is not what I mean by date night. 1.2156 0.03903 167 138 22 7
6268 I’ve switched to denim - it breathes better and shows my more vulnerable side. 1.2156 0.03616 167 135 28 4
6269 Are you wearing a chastity belt too? 1.2155 0.03530 181 147 29 5
6270 This is not what I meant by "late night drink". 1.2155 0.03700 181 149 25 7
6271 Just preparing for the Trump Effect 1.2155 0.03530 181 147 29 5
6272 Sticks and stones may not break my bones...but watch the sarcasm ok? 1.2154 0.03597 195 161 26 8
6273 No, no one EVER expects their 'Knight in shining armor', except of course, me. 1.2152 0.03846 158 129 24 5
6274 You come here often? 1.2152 0.03846 158 129 24 5
6275 We can Uber back to Camelot after dessert." 1.2152 0.03739 158 128 26 4
6276 When you told me you were knighted, this wasn’t exactly what I thought. 1.2151 0.03549 172 139 29 4
6277 I'm not just some dame to you, if that's what you're thinking. 1.2151 0.03643 172 140 27 5
6278 #notbyme 1.2151 0.03549 172 139 29 4
6279 I want to get close to you, but you won't let me in. It's like you have a shield up, metaphorically speaking. 1.2151 0.03643 172 140 27 5
6280 I think I’ll pass on a second date, your words have a hollow ring to them 1.2151 0.03735 172 141 25 6
6281 No, you can't have a straw. This is my dream! 1.2151 0.03549 172 139 29 4
6282 I always get nervous during these things, but my girlfriends say I should let my guard down and have fun. 1.2151 0.03643 172 140 27 5
6283 if you order a well-done steak with Ketchup , then your plan to go out incognito might just not work the way you hoped it would. 1.2151 0.03632 186 153 26 7
6284 Good Night! You really don’t look like your profile picture! 1.2148 0.03876 149 121 24 4
6285 Actually, I'm wary about the 'Me,Too' movement. 1.2148 0.03991 149 122 22 5
6286 'The problem is, there are no real men anymore." 1.2147 0.03561 163 131 29 3
6287 Oh, I thought you meant a night cap! 1.2147 0.03666 163 132 27 4
6288 I know this meal will cost you an armor a leg, but that's why I love you. 1.2147 0.03768 163 133 25 5
6289 The wine definitely has a bouquet of aged metal 1.2147 0.03768 163 133 25 5
6290 You bet your ass I'm afraid of the chef! 1.2147 0.03768 163 133 25 5
6291 So whoopy-do it’s a round table. I dub you Sir Cheapskate. 1.2147 0.03666 163 132 27 4
6292 I think you took "Wine Night" too literally 1.2147 0.03561 163 131 29 3
6293 I should have jousted left. 1.2147 0.03561 163 131 29 3
6294 Do you do the Knight In Shining Armor schtick with all your Match.com dates? 1.2147 0.03453 163 130 31 2
6295 I could shine your armor with this swill. 1.2147 0.03751 177 146 24 7
6296 My mom insists I wear this old thing." 1.2147 0.03576 177 144 28 5
6297 I was asking for a little more male chivalry, but thanks for trying. 1.2147 0.03485 177 143 30 4
6298 Most people are only a "knight in shining armor" on their Tinder profile 1.2147 0.03751 177 146 24 7
6299 Boy, this'll be a night to remember. No more blind dates for me. 1.2147 0.03793 191 160 21 10
6300 I know my ad said I’m looking for my knight in shining armor, but this is ridiculous. 1.2143 0.03789 168 138 24 6
6301 " I can see, but are you rich, funny, engaging AND good looking" 1.2143 0.03513 182 148 29 5
6302 Now that they don't allow straws here, we will have to find another place to meet. 1.2143 0.03681 182 150 25 7
6303 I told you this was just lunch. 1.2143 0.03789 168 138 24 6
6304 No, mom, it's not for Halloween. It's my new party dress. 1.2143 0.03596 168 136 28 4
6305 I waf on crufade. Have you heard about our Lord and favior, Jefuf Chrift? 1.2143 0.04062 168 141 18 9
6306 For a starter, i’ll take Jerusalem 1.2143 0.03596 168 136 28 4
6307 I presumed a medieval vintage would be appropriate for the occasion... 1.2143 0.03392 168 134 32 2
6308 All I said was I wanted to talk . . . 1.2143 0.03789 168 138 24 6
6309 I think you misunderstood. I said I would go out....but just for one night. 1.2143 0.04117 154 128 19 7
6310 Straws pollute. Do you think this is still the 20th century? 1.2143 0.03596 168 136 28 4
6311 They knew we were going out to dinner, dear. Why didn't they give you a metal straw? 1.2143 0.03789 168 138 24 6
6312 Well, sure, you would be under attack, but times have changed. 1.2143 0.03335 182 146 33 3
6313 How about a night cap later. 1.2143 0.03392 168 134 32 2
6314 Feels more like a day of dull amor,than a knight of shining armor 1.2139 0.03192 187 149 36 2
6315 When do you think they're going to finish paintings those bricks on the wall? 1.2139 0.03693 187 155 24 8
6316 Your Match profile as the Knight in Shining Armor mentioned combat and chivalry, but no clue this all extended to your wardrobe. 1.2139 0.03893 173 144 21 8
6317 Thanks, but I'm not exactly looking for a 'knight in shining armor' type. 1.2139 0.03434 173 139 31 3
6318 This wasn't exactly my idea of a one night stand..." 1.2139 0.03624 173 141 27 5
6319 Oh, you wear that all the time? 1.2139 0.03232 173 137 35 1
6320 Yes, I’m your knight in shining armour. 1.2139 0.03716 173 142 25 6
6321 What vintage did you say this wine is? 1.2139 0.03434 173 139 31 3
6322 Why the sour expression? I thought this was a blind date. 1.2138 0.03609 159 128 28 3
6323 With a Burgundy, why did you order sardines? 1.2138 0.03824 159 130 24 5
6324 Nice meeting you but I'm leaving. Don't care if it's still raining. 1.2135 0.03473 192 157 29 6
6325 Your profile said that you were long for a night in shining armor... 1.2135 0.03473 192 157 29 6
6326 It is a bit awkward but I should be safe from the "Me too" movement. 1.2135 0.03468 178 144 30 4
6327 I said I was into rousting 1.2135 0.03646 178 146 26 6
6328 I'd like to take it to another level, but there's something shielding you. 1.2135 0.03646 178 146 26 6
6329 Knight - check. Armor - check. But you're just not *that* shiny. 1.2134 0.03646 164 133 27 4
6330 You like seafood ? The codpiece here is really special. 1.2134 0.03646 164 133 27 4
6331 I wear this armor on all first dates, because inside I'm a delicate flower. 1.2134 0.03845 164 135 23 6
6332 I never wear my beaver up on a first date. 1.2134 0.03542 164 132 29 3
6333 They don’t serve straws here. 1.2133 0.03613 150 120 28 2
6334 I see you prefer red wine 1.2133 0.04078 150 124 20 6
6335 You make the toast so I don't get rusty" 1.2133 0.03967 150 123 22 5
6336 I am too cliched to comment. 1.2132 0.03962 136 110 23 3
6337 My last relationship was with a real dragon. 1.2131 0.03408 183 148 31 4
6338 Very clever. You can eat 5 strands of spaghetti at once without getting red sauce on your dress shirt. 1.2131 0.03580 183 150 27 6
6339 All of our friends have children... 1.2130 0.03577 169 137 28 4
6340 So, you're my knight in shining armor? 1.2130 0.03674 169 138 26 5
6341 When I suggested we meet in secret - my idea was that you just stand by the door of the restaurant... 1.2130 0.03674 169 138 26 5
6342 It's bullet-proof. 1.2130 0.03477 169 136 30 3
6343 Ideally, I’m looking for a mate who appreciates a boilerplate pre-nup. 1.2129 0.03544 155 124 29 2
6344 The metallic undertone you say you taste has nothing to do with how this wine was aged. 1.2129 0.03989 155 128 21 6
6345 It's funny that you feel that way, I let the wine be my armor. 1.2129 0.03773 155 126 25 4
6346 Funny, I've never noticed glasses of oil on the menu here. 1.2128 0.03266 188 151 34 3
6347 I'm glad you won me in the tournament, but I didn't think you'd dine in your business suit. 1.2128 0.03435 188 153 30 5
6348 I’m assuming you’re going utensil free again? 1.2128 0.03177 188 150 36 2
6349 White Satin" was in the ad 1.2128 0.04592 141 120 12 9
6350 This dress code is so yesterday! 1.2126 0.03785 174 144 23 7
6351 Well, I wouldn't exactly say'shining' armor 1.2126 0.03606 174 142 27 5
6352 I just thought the armor would be more shiney. 1.2126 0.03416 174 140 31 3
6353 Oh, you said "Iron Clad Date" not deal. 1.2126 0.03512 174 141 29 4
6354 Hey—I see the Hendersons! What say we sneak up on them? 1.2126 0.03416 174 140 31 3
6355 I misread your profile and didn't realize that you were looking for someone to "dis-armor" you. 1.2125 0.04195 160 135 16 9
6356 Hey, Honey, will you ask our waiter for a straw? 1.2125 0.03478 160 128 30 2
6357 This wine shows nose notes of Toledo steel and a long finish of stone pressed oils. 1.2125 0.03802 160 131 24 5
6358 Nice nose -- I like the metallic finish. 1.2123 0.03540 179 146 28 5
6359 Nice bouquet. Slightly metallic aftertaste. Not sure it's bold enough for the chorizo. 1.2123 0.03628 179 147 26 6
6360 I'm glad you chose a nice, inconspicuous corner table. 1.2123 0.03540 179 146 28 5
6361 Sorry, new environmental laws just passed - no straws allowed" ! 1.2123 0.03628 179 147 26 6
6362 I hear this place has the best Mutton in town. 1.2123 0.03358 179 144 32 3
6363 Honey, this is not what I meant by date night. 1.2121 0.03626 165 134 27 4
6364 I think your daughter probably didn’t tell you to swipe knight. 1.2121 0.03522 165 133 29 3
6365 Damn this mouth grill. It taints this vintage Nuit St. George 1.2120 0.03392 184 149 31 4
6366 does this wine go well with the grill 1.2120 0.03478 184 150 29 5
6367 Now lift your visor and say you Love me. 1.2118 0.03558 170 138 28 4
6368 Not that I see one, but is it chink or kink? 1.2118 0.03749 170 140 24 6
6369 At a three-Michelin-star restaurant you'd think I wouldn't have to ask for a straw. 1.2118 0.03749 170 140 24 6
6370 So... how long have you been on K-Date? 1.2118 0.03841 170 141 22 7
6371 Don't tell me...your father didn't appreciate you? 1.2117 0.04070 137 112 21 4
6372 How's your grog? 1.2116 0.03419 189 154 30 5
6373 I you don't like what's on the menu, we can just go to my place and joust. 1.2116 0.03336 189 153 32 4
6374 I said I wanted a dark night.... not a dark Knight! 1.2116 0.03250 189 152 34 3
6375 You will have to ask for a straw. 1.2115 0.03965 156 129 21 6
6376 Since your name is Guinevere, I thought this outfit might be appropriate. 1.2114 0.03399 175 141 31 3
6377 Sir Lancelot, next time I'm going to request a square table. 1.2114 0.03766 175 145 23 7
6378 A straw? You don't need a straw. Man up! 1.2114 0.03852 175 146 21 8
6379 All I said was a night at Chez Louis would be nice. 1.2113 0.03363 194 158 31 5
6380 Well I suppose it is one way to prevent sexual assault... 1.2113 0.03363 194 158 31 5
6381 My Mother advised me to 1.2113 0.03717 142 114 26 2
6382 KnightErrantSingles.com - Chivalry is alive and well. 1.2112 0.03781 161 132 24 5
6383 About time, after waiting for you all these years. 1.2112 0.03569 161 130 28 3
6384 Do you need a straw to drink your wine? 1.2111 0.03247 180 144 34 2
6385 This wasn't what I intended for a night out. 1.2111 0.03433 180 146 30 4
6386 Well, yes, it is shining but I meant it figuratively. 1.2109 0.03642 147 118 27 2
6387 Trust me, these VR goggles let me see everything. 1.2108 0.03706 166 136 25 5
6388 Your new Trump produced chastity for men belt is overstated 1.2108 0.03991 166 139 19 8
6389 A blue wave Democrat, Frank. My costume is a blue wave Democrat. 1.2108 0.03706 166 136 25 5
6390 I hear the burgers are good here, and the fries come with plenty of 3-in 1 Oil. 1.2108 0.03991 166 139 19 8
6391 I'm being investigated by Mueller. I want to see what the wold looks like seen through bars. 1.2108 0.03473 204 169 27 8
6392 OK so let me get this right, in this “me too” climate you actually see me as a damsel in distress?! 1.2105 0.03807 152 124 24 4
6393 I swiped right,not righteous. 1.2105 0.03571 152 122 28 2
6394 I guess you’re my knight in shining armor. 1.2105 0.04136 152 127 18 7
6395 I always remain in character during filming. 1.2105 0.03635 171 140 26 5
6396 I'm on the short list to replace Nikki Haley at the U.N. Do you think the plume is too festive? 1.2105 0.03807 152 124 24 4
6397 I've been on SO many dates... apparently the whole "knight-in-shining-armor" thing is a myth... 1.2105 0.03540 171 139 28 4
6398 It's not my fault talk to text heard "Must like nights of amore" not knights of armor! 1.2103 0.03425 195 160 29 6
6399 Well at least you were honest on your profile! 1.2102 0.03746 176 146 23 7
6400 You looked less gray in your profile picture. 1.2102 0.03476 176 143 29 4
6401 I know it’s our anniversary, but does it have to be moat water? 1.2102 0.03504 157 126 29 2
6402 ...well, it’s an overseas assignment with the Office of Faith-based Initiatives... 1.2102 0.03837 157 129 23 5
6403 Every woman says they want a knight in shining armor, and yet here I am still single. 1.2102 0.03618 157 127 27 3
6404 Well, you've always prayed for a knight in shining armor, haven't you? 1.2099 0.03325 181 146 32 3
6405 Sorry, I was never into the whole knight in shining armor thing 1.2099 0.03860 162 134 22 6
6406 There were no available horses, carriages were on 2.5x surge and my homing pigeon was dying. 1.2099 0.03760 162 133 24 5
6407 Ugh-this is going to be a long knight. 1.2098 0.04309 143 120 16 7
6408 Spending a night at a round table was the best I could do because I couldn't lance a lot. 1.2097 0.03444 186 152 29 5
6409 I was hoping we could meet eye to eye tonight. 1.2097 0.03444 186 152 29 5
6410 I'm a little disappointed that you didn't show up on a white charger. 1.2097 0.03609 186 154 25 7
6411 I told Harold a 'date night' would be a nice anniversary surprise. 1.2097 0.03609 186 154 25 7
6412 I was thinking you meant something else for a girls' night out. 1.2096 0.03271 167 133 33 1
6413 Next time you might want to mention the armor thing on your Jdate profile! 1.2096 0.03587 167 136 27 4
6414 Sweetheart, I don't think i am going too far out on a limb here to ask if part of the problem might be that you are frigid. 1.2096 0.03587 167 136 27 4
6415 You don't look like you're hungry 1.2096 0.03877 167 139 21 7
6416 Earthy, full-bodied, intense and oaky, with a spicy finish. Safe for thee to lift thy visor and drink." 1.2096 0.03783 167 138 23 6
6417 First Date: NOT a Fairy Tale! 1.2096 0.03485 167 135 29 3
6418 No meal, Lance, but we do have a round table. 1.2096 0.03783 167 138 23 6
6419 I think you misunderstood what I meant by, 'Ladies Night.' 1.2096 0.03783 167 138 23 6
6420 Baby, I'm your knight in shining armor,a knight to remember, out for a knight on the town, but not a one knight stand 1.2096 0.03877 167 139 21 7
6421 When I saw your bio in It's Just Lunch saying you'd be my knight in shining armor, I never thought... 1.2096 0.03587 167 136 27 4
6422 The knight in shining armor meets his match. 1.2095 0.03745 148 120 25 3
6423 If you'd asked, I would have told you I have a costume party after this. 1.2094 0.03220 191 154 34 3
6424 This is not what I had in mind when I said I wanted a stiff drink. 1.2094 0.03304 191 155 32 4
6425 I could never be a morning person. 1.2094 0.03387 191 156 30 5
6426 You always wanted a Knight in Shining Armor, no? 1.2093 0.03322 172 138 32 2
6427 So, after this, do you want to play Fortknight? 1.2093 0.03521 172 140 28 4
6428 So... what are you doing to-knight? 1.2093 0.03322 172 138 32 2
6429 ...and I thought the last woman I dated was a prude. 1.2092 0.03669 153 124 26 3
6430 My profile actually reads, ‘my fantasy is a night across a table’. 1.2092 0.04005 153 127 20 6
6431 Face to face conversations are not possible. 1.2092 0.03896 153 126 22 5
6432 my favorite time of day is when you give me the knightly news. 1.2092 0.03669 153 124 26 3
6433 As the round table shrinks in size and meaning, Gulliver wonders what could have been... 1.2090 0.03459 177 144 29 4
6434 Your dating profile said that you dreamt of meeting your knight in shiny armor. 1.2090 0.03895 177 149 19 9
6435 Janice tells me you're on a different kind of grail quest Sir Drinksalot? 1.2090 0.03640 177 146 25 6
6436 I just feel like you really get me. 1.2090 0.03550 177 145 27 5
6437 I'm on a totally liquid diet...I just need a straw. 1.2090 0.03365 177 143 31 3
6438 'I sure hope this is going to be a good 'knight'...' 1.2090 0.03550 177 145 27 5
6439 Not fair! 1.2090 0.03550 177 145 27 5
6440 Mildred, I still want separate checks. 1.2090 0.03459 177 144 29 4
6441 I'm very sensitive about the tattoos I did while I was soused. 1.2090 0.03812 177 148 21 8
6442 No, not to night, Rodger. 1.2089 0.03815 158 130 23 5
6443 No offence, but I was expecting your armour to be shinier. 1.2089 0.03708 158 129 25 4
6444 I have lost weight since my Tinder pic. Is that it? 1.2089 0.03598 158 128 27 3
6445 I thought you meant a night out-no silent k. 1.2089 0.03815 158 130 23 5
6446 I'm a bit suspicious, when my knight in shining armor can't distinguish between a Cabernet 1.2089 0.03708 158 129 25 4
6447 Don't they all taste a little metalic? 1.2089 0.03708 158 129 25 4
6448 Well, at least you look like your "Match" photo. 1.2088 0.03740 182 152 22 8
6449 My profile DID say I love my nightly glass of wine. 1.2086 0.03309 163 130 32 1
6450 I’m looking for an afternoon date, sorry. 1.2086 0.03636 163 133 26 4
6451 Night, Knight! 1.2086 0.03421 163 131 30 2
6452 Do you know how I got here? 1.2086 0.04031 163 137 18 8
6453 Just like my dating profile said, I want to be your knight in shining armor! 1.2086 0.03739 163 134 24 5
6454 I didn’t realize Knights brought their work home with them... 1.2086 0.03636 163 133 26 4
6455 Date knight was going great until someone brought up politics. 1.2086 0.03592 187 155 25 7
6456 Knight is shining armor is a euphemism. 1.2086 0.03343 187 152 31 4
6457 I know it's supposed to be spooky, but the smoke machine in the helmet is a bit much. 1.2083 0.03762 168 139 23 6
6458 You do realize the renesance fair ended last week? 1.2083 0.03568 168 137 27 4
6459 I appreciate the chivalry, but I'm choosing the next bottle 1.2083 0.03254 168 134 33 1
6460 Just shut it, Arnold. I heard enough. 1.2083 0.03666 168 138 25 5
6461 Knight night at the bistro 1.2083 0.03666 168 138 25 5
6462 This is not what I meant by "night time". 1.2081 0.03690 173 143 24 6
6463 When you asked I'd like to join you in a night cap, I didn't realize you expected me to wear one. 1.2081 0.03780 173 144 22 7
6464 I like my men more open. You're too protected for me. 1.2081 0.03598 149 120 27 2
6465 At least I don't need to worry about sunburns... 1.2079 0.03252 178 143 33 2
6466 I feel if we are regressing historically, I might dress the part. 1.2079 0.03252 178 143 33 2
6467 The last time I drank a glass of wine my enemy's concubine slipped a sleeping potion into it." 1.2079 0.03708 178 148 23 7
6468 Come on? There is no such a thing as don’t drink and ride. 1.2078 0.03873 154 127 22 5
6469 I've been really getting into fortified wine recently 1.2078 0.03981 154 128 20 6
6470 This is not what I expected from Tin-der. 1.2078 0.04289 154 131 14 9
6471 he says chivalry isn’t dead 1.2078 0.03762 154 126 24 4
6472 OK, I've seen mommy issues before, but what kind of dragon was she really? 1.2078 0.03648 154 125 26 3
6473 I am testing a new step in the AA program! 1.2075 0.03577 159 129 27 3
6474 #MeToo asks, "Are you wearing that to protect me, or you?" 1.2075 0.03687 159 130 25 4
6475 You’ve taken Fortnite to a whole new level 1.2074 0.03327 188 153 31 4
6476 It makes sipping mead very difficult. 1.2073 0.03616 164 134 26 4
6477 Remember when they used to serve bread? 1.2073 0.03718 164 135 24 5
6478 Well, obviously, the worst part is now I have to bring my own straw. 1.2073 0.03817 164 136 22 6
6479 Knights to see you again. 1.2073 0.03718 164 135 24 5
6480 FYI - I'm freeballin' 1.2073 0.03817 164 136 22 6
6481 I didn't know Tinder was such a literal medium. 1.2073 0.03616 164 134 26 4
6482 My new suit is waterproof. 1.2073 0.03403 164 132 30 2
6483 My profile said I would prefer to date at night. 1.2071 0.03926 169 142 19 8
6484 Yes,I'm confused! Thought your message said meet for wine to night,not with a knight! 1.2071 0.03549 169 138 27 4
6485 No straws? That’s so medieval. 1.2071 0.03549 169 138 27 4
6486 Don’t expect too much; I’m kind of locked-up inside. 1.2071 0.03549 169 138 27 4
6487 My ex-husband preferred Bloody Marys 1.2071 0.03742 169 140 23 6
6488 Your profile didn't mention you'd be my knight in shining armor. 1.2071 0.03448 169 137 29 3
6489 Are you sure you belong on Jdate? 1.2071 0.03835 169 141 21 7
6490 Funny coincidence: I slaughtered the infidels who made this wine. Ah well... to your health! 1.2069 0.03777 145 118 24 3
6491 Please don't open a door for me ever again. 1.2069 0.04140 145 121 18 6
6492 Next time I promise we will go to a medieval theme restaurant. 1.2069 0.03579 174 143 26 5
6493 Sorry if you find my voice grating. 1.2069 0.03485 174 142 28 4
6494 You know, straws are no longer available for wine drinking. 1.2069 0.03579 174 143 26 5
6495 Your Tinder profile said you prefer White men, so I dressed up as a White Knight. 1.2069 0.03579 174 143 26 5
6496 So, Darth, could I give you some friendly advice regarding a uniform upgrade? 1.2069 0.03670 174 144 24 6
6497 The date went okay, I guess, he's just no knight in shining armor... 1.2069 0.03579 174 143 26 5
6498 Thanks for waiting, I didn’t have time to change out of my Uber Riding Suit. 1.2069 0.03760 174 145 22 7
6499 Sorry Mary, I am not crazy. I'm just hiding from the debt collectors. 1.2067 0.03424 179 146 29 4
6500 What is that necklece about? 1.2067 0.03689 179 149 23 7
6501 Dilly, dilly! 1.2067 0.03603 179 148 25 6
6502 It just makes drinking wine more interesting. 1.2067 0.03819 150 123 23 4
6503 This isn't what you meant when you said you like roll playing? 1.2065 0.03453 184 151 28 5
6504 Armour Amour.... 1.2063 0.03329 160 128 31 1
6505 I feel like Katherine Hepburn in On Golden Pond 1.2063 0.03666 160 131 25 4
6506 And how am I suppose to know for sure you are a male knight? That fuzzy whatcamacallit on your helmet could go a couple different ways, you know., 1.2063 0.03666 160 131 25 4
6507 Sorry, buddy, but I don't think I can date a libra. 1.2063 0.03875 160 133 21 6
6508 Seeing Princess in a profile puts my guard up. 1.2063 0.03772 160 132 23 5
6509 What the hell is wrong with you? 1.2063 0.03875 160 133 21 6
6510 Nice plume, but sorry, it looks to me like you have a drinking problem. 1.2062 0.03258 194 158 32 4
6511 I thought you said Girl's Night. 1.2061 0.03796 165 137 22 6
6512 Don't worry Mr Kavanagh, it's non alcoholic. And no, this is not how you need to dress to court now. 1.2061 0.03492 165 134 28 3
6513 At forty, I realized I was never going to find my knight in shining armor 1.2061 0.03796 165 137 22 6
6514 I thought a little wine would lessen your armored insecurity. 1.2061 0.03384 165 133 30 2
6515 Sorry this conversation is dull I should have polished up 1.2061 0.03492 165 134 28 3
6516 Oh! Good knight! You really need to get some help! 1.2059 0.03722 170 141 23 6
6517 So, you want proof that I'm a Knight? 1.2059 0.03722 170 141 23 6
6518 All I ask is that,next time,we get a square table for two. 1.2059 0.03530 170 139 27 4
6519 Gloria, while you try to figure out how to drink your wine, I'll try to figure out how to get through your defense mechanism 1.2059 0.03530 170 139 27 4
6520 Face it, Harry, your armor ain't shining no more! 1.2059 0.03627 170 140 25 5
6521 Does your new wife know you are meeting tonight with your ex? 1.2057 0.03651 175 145 24 6
6522 Thanks. I've been so busy at work and REALLY need a knight out. 1.2056 0.03497 180 148 27 5
6523 I thought I should warn you about the house red. 1.2056 0.03407 180 147 29 4
6524 If it's any consolation to you,only the Hippest restaurants stop using straws. 1.2055 0.04114 146 122 18 6
6525 I warned you, this wasn't going to be night you were expecting, Linda 1.2054 0.03350 185 151 30 4
6526 Would you mind giving me a signal when you started to rub your foot against my leg? 1.2054 0.03261 185 150 32 3
6527 Your army isn't so shiny in this lighting. 1.2054 0.03261 185 150 32 3
6528 Whew, it's been a one rough week." "I know Brett, but must you wear that suit? 1.2054 0.03350 185 151 30 4
6529 I agree education is everything, but the night school you recommended is very demanding. 1.2054 0.03521 185 153 26 6
6530 It seems as if you're hiding something. And another thing: how do you plan to get that wine past your visor? 1.2053 0.03556 151 122 27 2
6531 Well, social conscience is one thing, but if I'd known about the ban on straws I would have ordered this to go. 1.2051 0.03402 195 161 28 6
6532 Ever since the hack I have been extra careful with Ashley Madison. 1.2051 0.03554 195 163 24 8
6533 So you're a Roundtable Knight. 1.2051 0.03828 156 129 22 5
6534 Isn;t this going a bit far for our first 'no picture' dating App? 1.2051 0.03828 156 129 22 5
6535 Buying an empty suit of armor and some wine didn’t fill the emptiness in my heart. 1.2051 0.03606 156 127 26 3
6536 I know this was a blind date but REALLY 1.2051 0.03828 156 129 22 5
6537 No wonder his tinder username was roundtable123. 1.2051 0.03368 156 125 30 1
6538 Rescued from a knight in shining armor? 1.2050 0.03538 161 131 27 3
6539 I was told you were into "Goth" but ....... 1.2050 0.03311 161 129 31 1
6540 I assumed you could remove the shining armor. 1.2050 0.03853 161 134 21 6
6541 I know you described yourself as an old fashioned gentleman, but I am still surprised 1.2050 0.03538 161 131 27 3
6542 I'm surprised you ordered a Chardonnay. 1.2050 0.03538 161 131 27 3
6543 And to think that I almost swiped left on my knight in shining armor! 1.2048 0.03366 166 134 30 2
6544 It takes a bold man to eat the oysters. 1.2047 0.03608 171 141 25 5
6545 You're one of those "white knights" I read about, aren't you... 1.2047 0.03511 171 140 27 4
6546 But you said you've been feeling distressed...! 1.2047 0.03511 171 140 27 4
6547 I don't think romance with you would be fun. 1.2047 0.03794 171 143 21 7
6548 Frankly, I’ve been generally disappointed in Knights.com 1.2045 0.03632 176 146 24 6
6549 I like to think chivalry has not died, m'lady. 1.2045 0.03542 176 145 26 5
6550 You need to stop being hard headed and listen! 1.2045 0.03632 176 146 24 6
6551 Your armor is shiny and you are a knight, but I feel like I’ve been misled. 1.2044 0.03566 181 150 25 6
6552 WELL, HONEY, I THINK YOU'VE MANAGED TO COMBINE SOBER OCTOBER AND HALLOWEEN. 1.2044 0.03479 181 149 27 5
6553 You don't look at all like your profile picture. That knight was wearing an Armet, but this is clearly a Close Helm! 1.2043 0.03585 186 155 24 7
6554 I'm afraid there's been a mistake. I represent the Dreamy Nights dating service. 1.2042 0.03107 191 154 35 2
6555 Are you dating? 1.2042 0.03444 191 158 27 6
6556 Does Meade go with roast beast? 1.2041 0.03731 147 120 24 3
6557 Why not? Well for one, my profile said I'm looking for 'a night of amore with a sharp guy'." 1.2041 0.03309 196 161 30 5
6558 Your profile said you work in the High Castle? 1.2039 0.03656 152 124 25 3
6559 You said that all you wanted was a night out. 1.2039 0.03998 152 127 19 6
6560 You're my fourth online date this week with a knight in shining armour. Are you married?" 1.2039 0.03773 152 125 23 4
6561 I look lovely?, what the f**k does that mean, Jim? 1.2038 0.03912 157 131 20 6
6562 What the hell, Dimitri - The least you could do would be to Smile. 1.2038 0.03697 157 129 24 4
6563 I've figured out the perfect way to avoid homophobes. 1.2037 0.03407 162 131 29 2
6564 So,you really want to stick with blaming Siri for ruining another date night 1.2037 0.03625 162 133 25 4
6565 Do you happen to have a re-usable straw? 1.2037 0.03293 162 130 31 1
6566 Won't you be my Dulci-neighbor? 1.2036 0.03657 167 138 24 5
6567 I forgot my oil can, would you ask the waiter for a straw? 1.2036 0.03348 167 135 30 2
6568 Is that what they call fortified wine? 1.2036 0.03557 167 137 26 4
6569 This knight in shining armour thing doesn't seem to work well in the 21st century. 1.2036 0.03755 167 139 22 6
6570 Only above the waist. You? 1.2036 0.03239 167 134 32 1
6571 You misunderstood. I didn't say, "Joust dress well to Knight." 1.2035 0.03862 172 145 19 8
6572 My mother always told me, don't judge a knight by his armor. 1.2035 0.03394 172 140 29 3
6573 I just don't think #MeTuna will take off. 1.2035 0.03589 172 142 25 5
6574 Is Armor making a comeback or are you going as Kavanaugh for Halloween? 1.2035 0.03862 172 145 19 8
6575 I only wear this the first 3 dates 1.2034 0.03336 177 144 30 3
6576 Have you read IRON JOHN? 1.2034 0.03614 177 147 24 6
6577 Bet you never thought you’d meet your Knight in Shining Armor. 1.2034 0.03336 177 144 30 3
6578 I meant that I enjoyed the movie. 1.2034 0.03336 177 144 30 3
6579 Contrary to what you’ve heard, I don’t bite.” 1.2033 0.03462 182 150 27 5
6580 Shirley, you're transgender, not trans generation. 1.2033 0.03462 182 150 27 5
6581 I guess I thought your armor would have a nicer shine, but whatever. 1.2033 0.03548 182 151 25 6
6582 Why not just brush your teeth! And GARGLE! 1.2033 0.03373 182 149 29 4
6583 Uh-oh. This wine is running right through me. A little help? 1.2033 0.03633 182 152 23 7
6584 Do you drink only vintage wine? 1.2032 0.03403 187 154 28 5
6585 Did Harmony.com tell you I was being ironic when I said I was still looking for my knight in shining armor? 1.2027 0.03708 148 121 24 3
6586 I agree the wine is sharp but let's not go comparing it to a lance. 1.2026 0.03864 153 127 21 5
6587 So, you're a Vegas fan? 1.2025 0.03676 158 130 24 4
6588 There's something uncanny about you, that I rather like. Let's drink to that. 1.2025 0.03991 158 133 18 7
6589 No, Bennett, what I said was I would like us to get into Amaretto 1.2025 0.03676 158 130 24 4
6590 One scratch on the steed, and I'll have that valet's job. 1.2025 0.03605 163 134 25 4
6591 So, do you really consider yourself my knight in shining armor? 1.2025 0.03908 163 137 19 7
6592 Sir knight, you said you'd reveal yourself at our first meeting. 1.2025 0.03388 163 132 29 2
6593 I'm looking for my knight in shining armor; I'm joust not interested in a one knight stand. 1.2025 0.03809 163 136 21 6
6594 Nothing personal, but I prefer my sparkling dream to the corrosion of real life. 1.2024 0.04010 168 143 16 9
6595 I'm your knight in shining armor, but it's also protection against #MeToo 1.2024 0.03436 168 137 28 3
6596 Really? It only worked on our first date. 1.2024 0.03734 168 140 22 6
6597 I see you are already protection. I'm not that kind of....oh hell let me finish my merlot. 1.2024 0.03538 168 138 26 4
6598 The dating app said you would be might knight in shining armor, but I wasn't expecting a knight in shining armor! 1.2024 0.03734 168 140 22 6
6599 You said we need to have a talk? 1.2023 0.03753 173 145 21 7
6600 It's no good Charlie, I'll get you in the end, then our lawyers can litigate the sexual harassment element. 1.2023 0.03570 173 143 25 5
6601 I told you before this isn't a straw type of place. 1.2022 0.03682 178 149 22 7
6602 I probably shouldn't have used in metaphor in describing my ideal mate. 1.2022 0.03506 178 147 26 5
6603 You said you would be my knight in shining armor but this has gone to far. 1.2022 0.03414 178 146 28 4
6604 I know this table is round, but really? 1.2022 0.03320 178 145 30 3
6605 if you’d take that damn helmet off you could smell the exquisite nose! 1.2022 0.03682 178 149 22 7
6606 Plastic or paper? 1.2022 0.03320 178 145 30 3
6607 This way I am able to avoid all temptations! 1.2022 0.03266 183 149 31 3
6608 Would you please ask our waiter for a straw - I think he's trying to ignore me.... 1.2022 0.03172 183 148 33 2
6609 My contract specifies Bud Light. The King could have my head for this. 1.2022 0.03615 183 153 23 7
6610 Your chicken will pair nicely with this mead. 1.2021 0.03551 188 157 24 7
6611 I just needed to see what all the hype was about. 1.2014 0.03763 144 118 23 3
6612 Honey, you can't wear that to the prom. Your chastity belt will be enough. 1.2013 0.03924 149 124 20 5
6613 This moth-phobia is a bit extreme,in my opinion. 1.2013 0.03686 149 122 24 3
6614 Donald,please go back to the closet. NOW 1.2013 0.03841 154 128 21 5
6615 I feel like a knight at the 'intimate' roundtable. 1.2013 0.03841 154 128 21 5
6616 Well, it's not exactly about chivalry. 1.2013 0.03370 154 124 29 1
6617 Safety comes at a price 1.2013 0.03613 154 126 25 3
6618 I realize you're a lady's knight, but the feeling's not right. 1.2013 0.03312 159 128 30 1
6619 I've always wanted to play sports, but sometimes I'm afraid of looking clumsy. 1.2013 0.03544 159 130 26 3
6620 Bring It On 1.2013 0.03655 159 131 24 4
6621 The days of Knights are over. 1.2013 0.03762 159 132 22 5
6622 I think you'd enjoy the wine more If I got you a straw. 1.2013 0.03655 159 131 24 4
6623 Let me spell it out, GOOD NIGHT and that's without a K! 1.2012 0.03788 164 137 21 6
6624 I shined this armor just for you 1.2012 0.03788 164 137 21 6
6625 Speed dater #4, I can see that you have a passion for merlot. 1.2012 0.03479 164 134 27 3
6626 Which one do I have to wear to the Smiths' barbecue tomorrow? 1.2012 0.03479 164 134 27 3
6627 Knight Amour 1.2012 0.03585 164 135 25 4
6628 RENAISSANCE FAIR VIGNETTE 1.2012 0.03714 169 141 22 6
6629 So, you're not one of the Knights who owns Nike? 1.2012 0.03313 169 137 30 2
6630 Your acne was never that bad! 1.2012 0.03618 169 140 24 5
6631 I admit I’ve been pining for a Knight in shining armor...but this is a bit much. 1.2012 0.03714 169 141 22 6
6632 I'll just surrender to the Merlot. 1.2011 0.03551 174 144 25 5
6633 Is our relationship suffocating, or have you become close minded? 1.2011 0.03643 174 145 23 6
6634 Granted, but that doesn’t imply I prefer ‘one knight sits’ instead. 1.2011 0.03397 179 147 28 4
6635 It's not what you said; it's how you said it. 1.2011 0.03577 179 149 24 6
6636 I'm having a difficult time adjusting to these bifocals. 1.2011 0.03428 184 152 27 5
6637 Not exactly what I was expecting from your tinder profile... 1.2011 0.03428 184 152 27 5
6638 Let’s split the check. 1.2000 0.03645 180 151 22 7
6639 When your profile said 'knight in shining armor,' I thought you meant it figuratively. 1.2000 0.03598 170 141 24 5
6640 These new rules for dating are really confusing. Like, am I still allowed to shine or what? 1.2000 0.03664 150 123 24 3
6641 Can't wait for this big date knight. 1.2000 0.03664 150 123 24 3
6642 I like to think of myself as a sort of everyknight. 1.2000 0.03046 205 167 35 3
6643 So much for leaving online dating behind for the real world ... 1.2000 0.03945 160 135 18 7
6644 Think of something else. I would really embarrass me to be seen with someone drinking wine from a straw. 1.2000 0.04123 150 127 16 7
6645 It's not as difficult as you may think,if you will help me down on the floor,I can drink most of it. 1.2000 0.03270 190 156 30 4
6646 And I says, “Armor, I don’t even know her!” Not even a chuckle from the valet, he just keeps asking where the keys are. So I guess *he’s* the funny guy... 1.2000 0.03592 155 127 25 3
6647 I suggest a different outfit for our next wine tasting date 1.2000 0.03411 160 130 28 2
6648 This wasn’t what I was expecting when you asked if I wanted a dinner night. 1.2000 0.03671 190 161 20 9
6649 But your armor will get rusty from crossing my moat. 1.2000 0.03533 175 145 25 5
6650 So much for meeting my knight in shining armor. 1.2000 0.03470 180 149 26 5
6651 You said online that you were a knight-not a knight in armor. 1.2000 0.03399 170 139 28 3
6652 And thats why I didn't hold the door open. 1.2000 0.03234 185 151 31 3
6653 Not sure why, but I prefer a dark aged wine. 1.2000 0.03524 160 131 26 3
6654 Any Saracen exes I should know about? 1.2000 0.03240 165 133 31 1
6655 Watch out for maggots, oops I mean magnets! 1.2000 0.03380 180 148 28 4
6656 I think you're more than ready for the Ren-Fair tomorrow. 1.2000 0.03438 175 144 27 4
6657 Yes, my add did say "tough on the outside with a heart of gold" but surely you joust. 1.2000 0.03399 170 139 28 3
6658 Not my fault. I told you to buy the one with the built-in straw. 1.2000 0.04106 145 122 17 6
6659 What's your sign? 1.2000 0.03694 170 142 22 6
6660 The tinnin is too strong. 1.2000 0.03866 145 120 21 4
6661 You mean you're not picking up the check? 1.2000 0.03559 180 150 24 6
6662 Mebbe your place...my landlord would complain about the clanking noises! 1.2000 0.03500 170 140 26 4
6663 I just moved to town to help dig the new moat - funding for the wall dried up pretty fast. 1.2000 0.03460 165 135 27 3
6664 Are my verbal barbs getting to you? 1.2000 0.03707 155 128 23 4
6665 Dang! Knew that I should have worn my burqa 1.2000 0.03844 160 134 20 6
6666 I didn't have to ask for this table. 1.2000 0.03460 165 135 27 3
6667 ..and Sir Geoffrey leaned over from his warhorse and whispered" (ready?? giggle) "JOUST KIDDING!" Brahaha! I am dying in here! See the tears 1.2000 0.04013 150 126 18 6
6668 So, Father Flanagan, do ye really prefer hearing me confession in that there outfit rather than a confessional booth? 1.1990 0.03499 191 160 24 7
6669 I always wanted to have a night cap with a knight. 1.1989 0.03218 186 152 31 3
6670 To be clear, here's my expectations for my knight in shining armor. 1.1989 0.03606 176 147 23 6
6671 Been awhile since you've had a knight out? 1.1989 0.03694 176 148 21 7
6672 Trust me: Calories will always find a way." 1.1989 0.03514 176 146 25 5
6673 What really distresses me is the shining armor. 1.1989 0.03225 176 143 31 2
6674 Sorry. I thought tonight was Fetish Night. 1.1988 0.03857 171 145 18 8
6675 I'm curious: have you ever been to a night club? 1.1988 0.03381 171 140 28 3
6676 Before we go any further, you should know I've sworn my loyalty to another Lady. 1.1988 0.03482 171 141 26 4
6677 Linda had such high, romantic hopes for this blind date until he opened his trap...."Waiter, oh waiter! I needeth a tube that draweth the wine to my dry lips and parched throat! Hurry up man, before I throw thee into the dungeon!" 1.1988 0.03482 171 141 26 4
6678 Oh, I knew what you meant when you said you wanted to have a round table discussion about our relationship; the armor is just for my protection. 1.1988 0.03579 171 142 24 5
6679 Not much. And you? 1.1988 0.03674 171 143 22 6
6680 So happy to meet you! 1.1988 0.03579 171 142 24 5
6681 So, this is what you meant by a nightcap. 1.1988 0.03579 171 142 24 5
6682 ‘Just a guess,have you ever been on too many dates with self centered guys who never shut up about their cars? 1.1988 0.03746 166 139 21 6
6683 You take a blind date-knight out really seriously. 1.1988 0.03746 166 139 21 6
6684 I mean, the place is called Britannia Arms, I warned you to come in proper attire. 1.1988 0.03647 166 138 23 5
6685 As a supporter of gender equality, I am glad you believe chivalry isn't dead" 1.1988 0.03441 166 136 27 3
6686 'Let me guess. I'm your 'steed' again?' 1.1988 0.03647 166 138 23 5
6687 I was hoping for a bit more shine. 1.1988 0.03546 166 137 25 4
6688 This blind date's off the hook, wouldn't you agree? Everyone always says I have a magnetic personality. 1.1988 0.03505 161 132 26 3
6689 I’d love to return the favour but straws are really bad for the environment. 1.1988 0.03614 161 133 24 4
6690 I’m trying to up my game. How am I doing? 1.1988 0.03823 161 135 20 6
6691 Actually, "Wine Night" is just the name of this event. 1.1988 0.03505 161 132 26 3
6692 I’m rethinking my little girl dream, of a knight in shining armor. 1.1987 0.03796 156 130 21 5
6693 I really have never been here at night-time." 1.1987 0.03685 156 129 23 4
6694 Oh, When you said you needed to get a early start for a tournament I though you meant something else I 1.1986 0.04080 146 123 17 6
6695 One Republican. One Democrat. Two glasses of wine. No food. 1.1986 0.03660 141 115 24 2
6696 I'm sorry but your armor is just not shiny enough. 1.1978 0.03435 182 151 26 5
6697 I always wear this suit on the first date 1.1978 0.03346 182 150 28 4
6698 I’m not looking for something serious ... you’d just be part of my iron deficiency program ... 1.1978 0.03254 182 149 30 3
6699 I know my online profile said I was looking for a knight in shining armour.... 1.1978 0.03523 182 152 24 6
6700 I didn't think you meant litterally 1.1977 0.03403 177 146 27 4
6701 I'm losing the battle over plastic straws. 1.1977 0.03403 177 146 27 4
6702 You specifically wished for a knight in shining armour. You did not make any mention of Paul McCartney 1.1977 0.03560 172 143 24 5
6703 I think you are taking this Game of Thrones role play a little too seriously, Cersei. 1.1977 0.04009 172 148 14 10
6704 It’s too bad you’re not my knight in shining armor ! 1.1977 0.03463 172 142 26 4
6705 Since you've taken my online profile literally, let me say that I prefer to dine under florescent lighting. And forget the beach stuff. 1.1977 0.03560 172 143 24 5
6706 You were expecting shining nakedness? 1.1977 0.03654 172 144 22 6
6707 You're not a bad guy, Jeff. I'm just saying you're no knight in shining armour. 1.1977 0.03836 172 146 18 8
6708 Don't spill your drink. The suit might rust. 1.1977 0.03463 172 142 26 4
6709 Don't get your hopes up. I'm no knight in shining armor. 1.1976 0.03423 167 137 27 3
6710 Now this has to be your last charade. I'm guessing, "Girl's knight out." 1.1976 0.03628 167 139 23 5
6711 These dating apps can make you feel so vulnerable at times. 1.1976 0.03423 167 137 27 3
6712 When I described my ideal date on the website, I expecting to be taken literally. 1.1976 0.03527 167 138 25 4
6713 Soo... uhm.. I can see what you do for a living..... 1.1976 0.03527 167 138 25 4
6714 Damn! I keep forgetting it’s BYOS* these days. *Bring Your Own Straw 1.1975 0.03900 162 137 18 7
6715 Let's have another round at the table to knight 1.1975 0.03485 162 133 26 3
6716 I would prefer a night with shining arm hair. 1.1975 0.03984 157 133 17 7
6717 The whole “knight in shining armor” thing was merely a metaphor you say? 1.1975 0.03551 157 129 25 3
6718 This is my solution to problem of sexual assault and harassment 1.1975 0.03434 157 128 27 2
6719 You’re boring me. This Knight is over. 1.1975 0.03551 157 129 25 3
6720 By day I parade our company foci: helmets, steel, and wigs. 1.1975 0.03434 157 128 27 2
6721 I'm going to need a straw for the Château Lafite-Rothschild. 1.1974 0.03371 152 123 28 1
6722 . . . and just how do you expect to take a sip? 1.1974 0.03498 152 124 26 2
6723 And now it is all done electronically. 1.1973 0.03565 147 120 25 2
6724 You missed a spot 1.1973 0.03938 147 123 19 5
6725 Yeah, maybe I do take Pat Benatar too literally. 1.1969 0.03052 193 157 34 2
6726 This is a little more tannic than the 1091 A.D. vintage 1.1968 0.03275 188 155 29 4
6727 Ewe... this wine has an unpleasant metallic taste. 1.1967 0.03418 183 152 26 5
6728 You ordered a horsemeat steak? 1.1966 0.03386 178 147 27 4
6729 The rumors are a hoax. Can't you see that I am a knight in shining armor? 1.1965 0.03346 173 142 28 3
6730 I selected a round table to signify my everlasting devotion as well as equality in paying the innkeeper. 1.1964 0.03508 168 139 25 4
6731 You said you wanted chivalry, not a Weinstein. 1.1964 0.03800 168 142 19 7
6732 Is this your idea of Amour 1.1963 0.03355 163 133 28 2
6733 Ever heard of #me too Lance? Don’t let your blunted tip get you in trouble. 1.1963 0.03779 163 137 20 6
6734 I think you misunderstood when my profile said I was a fan of "Night Moves." 1.1963 0.03355 163 133 28 2
6735 I really wasn't secretly wishing you'd look like you did on Snapchat. 1.1963 0.03678 163 136 22 5
6736 Wait until I know you better before you become my knight in shining armor. 1.1963 0.03355 163 133 28 2
6737 Yes dear, I understand that chivalry is not the same thing as presence. 1.1962 0.03643 158 131 23 4
6738 I remember you: late December back in '63. It was a very special time for me. 1.1962 0.03643 158 131 23 4
6739 I wanted my outfit to remind you of your childhood- oh, sorry, have I misjudged your age? 1.1962 0.03858 158 133 19 6
6740 I don’t have a straw for your wine, you figure it out” 1.1962 0.03858 158 133 19 6
6741 Could you also possibly be A Shining Knight in Amor? 1.1961 0.03339 204 171 26 7
6742 I personally thought the movie Full Metal Jacket was way overdone. 1.1961 0.03599 153 126 24 3
6743 In 30 years, I might be a candidate for the Supreme Court. 1.1961 0.03941 153 129 18 6
6744 Tell me more about your six-pack of wine with pop-top cans idea! 1.1961 0.04049 153 130 16 7
6745 Do you call it a spear or a stick? 1.1959 0.03913 148 124 19 5
6746 Glad we could reschedule. I’m usually not available on knights. 1.1959 0.03794 148 123 21 4
6747 Blind dates are tough, but I'm a Prince of a guy 1.1959 0.04029 148 125 17 6
6748 I don’t usually date Libras, but you seem different than other women. 1.1958 0.03345 189 157 27 5
6749 Just to let you know I’m ordering the frog legs 1.1957 0.03313 184 152 28 4
6750 But if I sat closer and spilled it, you'd rust! 1.1957 0.03488 184 154 24 6
6751 Computer dating has been pretty rough, but I think of myself as open to a new relationship. 1.1957 0.03572 184 155 22 7
6752 Your profile pic was pretty spot-on 1.1957 0.03829 138 114 21 3
6753 My stylist is really into vintage looks. 1.1955 0.03550 179 150 23 6
6754 Another swipe ‘wrong’ on Ye Olde Tinder. 1.1955 0.03461 179 149 25 5
6755 I know this is an open-carry state but aren't you going a bit overboard? 1.1954 0.03329 174 143 28 3
6756 Your Tinder photo was far more interesting 1.1954 0.03523 174 145 24 5
6757 Don’t tell me you used up all the tinfoil. 1.1954 0.03427 174 144 26 4
6758 This is the first time that I have used the Knights and Ladies dating app. 1.1954 0.03227 174 142 30 2
6759 No, Mr. Judge, I have been abroad for several months. You were in the news you say? 1.1954 0.03707 174 147 20 7
6760 Your armor's dull. So much for truth in dating bios. 1.1954 0.03523 174 145 24 5
6761 when you can't find someone young enough to date you, you have to date a museum exhibit. 1.1954 0.03427 174 144 26 4
6762 Looking for my knight and shining armor. 1.1954 0.03523 174 145 24 5
6763 Sorry. Alexa still mumbles sometimes. I'd been expecting a Mighty Sighing Martyr. 1.1953 0.03489 169 140 25 4
6764 I’m glad you finally have off the knight shift. 1.1953 0.03281 169 138 29 2
6765 Where did you get this idea about a very scary time for young knights in shining armor. 1.1953 0.03386 169 139 27 3
6766 I wonder whether his kisses would have a metallic taste 1.1953 0.03489 169 140 25 4
6767 " Interesting... on Tin Der we slash right". 1.1951 0.03657 164 137 22 5
6768 Aren't you a little overdressed for a simple dinner out? 1.1951 0.03856 164 139 18 7
6769 I don't think so -- your armor isn't very shiny. 1.1951 0.03758 164 138 20 6
6770 Nancy, this is what I wear because my heart has been injured in the past and so I play it safe. 1.1951 0.03554 164 136 24 4
6771 Good night, sir! 1.1948 0.03807 154 129 20 5
6772 OK! You've covered all the bases!!! NOW... we can have sex! 1.1948 0.04230 154 133 12 9
6773 Can you see my straw? 1.1948 0.03694 154 128 22 4
6774 I'm quite open to being vulnerable; would you believe my ex felt that I was too emotionally guarded. 1.1948 0.03917 154 130 18 6
6775 Sure you enjoy noble wines; but seriously?" 1.1944 0.03852 144 120 20 4
6776 Really Harold.....the old Knight in shiny armor will get you nowhere. 1.1943 0.03409 175 145 26 4
6777 My last date complained that my outfit showed too much skin. 1.1943 0.03211 175 143 30 2
6778 I sneeze too damn much 1.1943 0.03409 175 145 26 4
6779 Enough with the "knight in shining armor" bit 1.1943 0.03504 175 146 24 5
6780 Indeed, Sir Varietal, it's a Riesling, but its Rust-Oleum nose is off-putting. 1.1941 0.03569 170 142 23 5
6781 Dear lady, I simply cannot join you in a toast until I find my chink. 1.1941 0.03368 170 140 27 3
6782 A blind date who is a man of steel? 1.1941 0.03368 170 140 27 3
6783 You don’t anything like your profile pic . 1.1941 0.03368 170 140 27 3
6784 Do you savour the essence or use a straw/ to sip/ 1.1941 0.03470 170 141 25 4
6785 yes, I 1.1941 0.03665 170 143 21 6
6786 Are you sure you look like the picture posted on your dating profile? 1.1941 0.03470 170 141 25 4
6787 On Match.com you mentioned that you were more of a Braveheart kind of guy. 1.1941 0.03263 170 139 29 2
6788 Is this what we have to wear to rule the world 1.1939 0.03534 165 137 24 4
6789 I’ve thought it over and your armor isn’t so shiny. 1.1939 0.03205 165 134 30 1
6790 You reocgnize me??!! 1.1939 0.03318 165 135 28 2
6791 That's some good wine. 1.1939 0.03261 196 163 28 5
6792 No, I do not want to be your squire. 1.1938 0.03915 160 136 17 7
6793 I'm beginning to understand how you were able to 'evolve beyond the need for defense mechanisms in relationships' 1.1935 0.03557 155 128 24 3
6794 I've reached the point where I am ready for my own Inquisition. 1.1935 0.03437 155 127 26 2
6795 You too? 1.1935 0.03672 155 129 22 4
6796 Let’s share some wings. 1.1935 0.03557 155 128 24 3
6797 The sommelier nailed it: this wine is noble, rich, piercing, and nutty. Just like you! 1.1934 0.03426 181 151 25 5
6798 Joust between you and me, this wine is weak. 1.1934 0.03426 181 151 25 5
6799 I think it's time for me to switch from knight-time dating to daytime dating. 1.1934 0.03426 181 151 25 5
6800 No, Harold, I would not describe it as mold-forward with ferric notes. 1.1933 0.03865 150 126 19 5
6801 I have just one thing to say "Good night" 1.1932 0.03295 176 145 28 3
6802 'Its loud in here!..... How's the wine?' 1.1932 0.03486 176 147 24 5
6803 Pardon the comment, my Knight, but your armor could use some shining. 1.1932 0.03195 176 144 30 2
6804 They always serve Friday knights at the round table. 1.1931 0.03701 145 120 22 3
6805 I take a hands off first date 1.1931 0.03118 202 167 31 4
6806 I know it's not funny, but it was leftover from another contest cartoon. 1.1930 0.03645 171 144 21 6
6807 I don’t appreciate you judging me for asking for a straw. 1.1930 0.03452 171 142 25 4
6808 I assume you do not eat, drink, or spit without a straw? 1.1930 0.03350 171 141 27 3
6809 Well, I suppose you’re chivalrous. 1.1929 0.03913 140 117 19 4
6810 You'll be fine.The nose,not the mouth,is the single most stage in wine tasting. 1.1929 0.03779 140 116 21 3
6811 Are you still looking for a knight in shining armor? 1.1928 0.03716 166 140 20 6
6812 You seem eager to joust over who’s to blame for our children’s failures. 1.1928 0.03188 166 135 30 1
6813 I feel that preventing my dates from identifying me adds to my mystery and allure. Now drink up. 1.1928 0.03813 166 141 18 7
6814 I'm in distress but let's lose the damsel if you want a second date 1.1928 0.03300 166 136 28 2
6815 Did you really think I wouldn't mind not seeing your eyes! 1.1928 0.03188 166 135 30 1
6816 I don't care how dense you think I am but I can see right through you! 1.1927 0.03379 192 161 25 6
6817 Janet loves me for me, why can't you see that? 1.1925 0.03688 161 135 21 5
6818 No, Harry. I said you’ve got bole weevils on your grass. 1.1925 0.03581 161 134 23 4
6819 Wow. This is quite the blind date. I should never trust technology these days. 1.1925 0.03581 161 134 23 4
6820 I'm sorry, could you repeat that? 1.1925 0.03471 161 133 25 3
6821 So, the hair gave me away? 1.1925 0.03352 187 156 26 5
6822 What I really want is a knight with a low carbon footprint. 1.1925 0.03083 187 153 32 2
6823 When you wrote on your Match profile that you wanted to be "your knight in shining armor" , I didn't think that you were being literal. 1.1923 0.03417 156 128 26 2
6824 I know I said steel on Tinder, but tin is kinda the same thing, you know? 1.1923 0.03651 156 130 22 4
6825 damn those literal gene's 1.1923 0.03651 156 130 22 4
6826 My night in shining armor only orders wine by the glass. 1.1923 0.03763 156 131 20 5
6827 It appears you were expecting a more demonstrative male. 1.1923 0.03798 130 107 21 2
6828 This is 92 point, 2014 Sonoma Merlot Oil. 1.1921 0.03278 177 146 28 3
6829 What is it you've heard about this neighborhood? 1.1921 0.03842 151 127 19 5
6830 Scenes from a Medieval Italian Restaurant 1.1921 0.03480 151 124 25 2
6831 Is this what the song meant by silent "knight"!! 1.1920 0.03885 125 103 20 2
6832 I know it is a blind date, but how about a wardrobe malfunction? 1.1919 0.03626 172 145 21 6
6833 Or, you could just not go out with him. 1.1918 0.03677 146 121 22 3
6834 Steve, you will never be my knight in shining armor. 1.1916 0.03597 167 140 22 5
6835 I know no one is out to get me, but just in case i'm wrong, I suited up." 1.1916 0.03597 167 140 22 5
6836 I don’t care what round table your’re from, I am still not calling you “Sir.” 1.1916 0.03597 167 140 22 5
6837 You"re a swashbuckler from a long line of swashbucklers 1.1916 0.03391 167 138 26 3
6838 Well Lance..I joust don't think this match will work. 1.1915 0.03737 188 162 16 10
6839 I took this precaution because I'm having an affair! 1.1915 0.03069 188 154 32 2
6840 Well, what'd you expect? Dinner at Medieval Times? 1.1914 0.03451 162 134 25 3
6841 Woman on blind date learns he is literally a knight in shining armor. 1.1914 0.03451 162 134 25 3
6842 "Join us for An Evening of Middle-aged Speed Dating" -- my ex-wife used to read the invitations and tell me what to wear. 1.1914 0.03667 162 136 21 5
6843 Thank you, I find you very attractive too. But please know I'm not a superficial man. 1.1913 0.03391 183 153 25 5
6844 Sooooo, when is the divorce settlement? 1.1912 0.04111 136 115 16 5
6845 Just make sure you tip the maitre’d this time.... 1.1911 0.03515 157 130 24 3
6846 What thinketh thou of the mead m' lady ? 1.1910 0.03261 178 147 28 3
6847 “Looks like a good time to open a can of words.” 1.1910 0.03162 178 146 30 2
6848 I still say it's easier to filter the wine as you pour it in the glass...... 1.1910 0.03541 178 150 22 6
6849 I guess I should have worded it differently on Craigslist for ' a romantic glass of wine with my knight in shinning armor!' 1.1910 0.03541 178 150 22 6
6850 Currently I with a political organization that promotes unity, new ideas, and transparency. 1.1910 0.03357 178 148 26 4
6851 I was initially against the intimacy coaching, but it's changed everything. 1.1910 0.03294 199 167 26 6
6852 Dating you has become positively medieval. 1.1910 0.03054 199 164 32 3
6853 If you don’t start drinking I’m going to leave! 1.1908 0.03819 152 128 19 5
6854 I'm not ready to talk under armor yet, my knight. 1.1908 0.03931 152 129 17 6
6855 Does happy hour include the blood of your enemies in HR? 1.1908 0.03583 152 126 23 3
6856 This "knight in shining armor" thing has really gone too far! 1.1908 0.03415 173 144 25 4
6857 You said on Tinder that you were looking for a knight in shining armor. 1.1908 0.03607 173 146 21 6
6858 I shall light thy day. 1.1908 0.03315 173 143 27 3
6859 Sorry. They seem to be all out of straws. 1.1908 0.03415 173 144 25 4
6860 How do you like my new conservative dining attire? 1.1908 0.03607 173 146 21 6
6861 I'm trying to cut down on drinking. 1.1907 0.03183 194 161 29 4
6862 So, will we have another knight out together? 1.1905 0.03525 147 121 24 2
6863 You've always had to steel yourself for the cocktail hour. 1.1905 0.03054 189 155 32 2
6864 I’m just not in a place to commit to a knight in shining armor. 1.1905 0.03372 168 139 26 3
6865 What makes you think I can get you out of that mess? 1.1905 0.03154 168 137 30 1
6866 Honestly, my germs are minimal, so enjoy 1.1905 0.03154 168 137 30 1
6867 I know I told you to get serious about date night, but this is a bit much. 1.1902 0.03374 184 154 25 5
6868 I’m not using straws anymore. 1.1902 0.03749 163 138 19 6
6869 It's like I always say—chivalry is red! 1.1902 0.03432 163 135 25 3
6870 I should've suspected something when your profile pic was a medieval tapestry. 1.1899 0.03340 179 149 26 4
6871 ‘I hate it when they look nothing like their picture...’ 1.1899 0.03146 179 147 30 2
6872 This armor oil is a particularly good vintage. 1.1899 0.03433 179 150 24 5
6873 Well... how’s the life of knight? 1.1899 0.03045 179 146 32 1
6874 It's not a great wine"It's not a great wine, but I think you will be amused by its pretensions. 1.1899 0.03340 179 149 26 4
6875 I’m really trying to move on from rescue dynamic relationships. 1.1899 0.03609 158 132 22 4
6876 Knights of the Roundtable For Two 1.1897 0.03397 174 145 25 4
6877 You really think the silent treatment is going to work on me? 1.1897 0.03298 174 144 27 3
6878 And you never considered any other career path . . . huh. 1.1895 0.03439 153 126 25 2
6879 That's not what I meant when I asked Match.com for a knight in shining armor. 1.1892 0.03877 148 125 18 5
6880 I didn’t think you’d be so literal ... I’m used to colorful euphemisms in online descriptions. 1.1892 0.03632 148 123 22 3
6881 I'm okay during the day, but it's those lonely knights... 1.1890 0.03826 164 140 17 7
6882 i told you if you wore that you would have trouble eating dinner 1.1890 0.03626 164 138 21 5
6883 How can you be someone's "knight in shining armor" if you only go dutch? 1.1890 0.03626 164 138 21 5
6884 Sure it's in the back. You wanted a round table. 1.1890 0.03413 164 136 25 3
6885 When I said that we should go someplace quiet to talk, I just had in mind planning our vacation. Why did you show up all defensive? 1.1890 0.04708 127 111 8 8
6886 This is not what I expected at Medievil Times! 1.1889 0.03323 180 150 26 4
6887 These first dates you get on the internet can be intimadating, don't you think? 1.1889 0.03228 180 149 28 3
6888 Good Knight honey! 1.1889 0.03323 180 150 26 4
6889 Sorry, Arthur. The web site clearly stated: "just for lunch". " 1.1889 0.03323 180 150 26 4
6890 No worries! Since straws were banned I find it easier not to drink too much. 1.1887 0.03697 159 134 20 5
6891 Well, no woman believes a men who describes himself as a "true cavalier" 1.1887 0.03475 159 132 24 3
6892 Don't give me your phony chivalry is dead routine. You suckered me into paying for the drinks since you don't have US dollars 1.1887 0.03697 159 134 20 5
6893 I told the Matchmaker Service that I'd like to meet a middle-age man to be my knight i shining armor but I never thought.. 1.1887 0.03238 159 130 28 1
6894 So, do you have any siblings? 1.1886 0.03074 175 143 31 1
6895 Are you jousting about your knowledge of fine aged wines? 1.1886 0.03380 175 146 25 4
6896 Foot wrestling. 1.1885 0.03202 191 159 28 4
6897 And a round table too. Can I leave now? 1.1884 0.03644 138 114 22 2
6898 "What gives with the getup, you said it was a safe place? 1.1883 0.03292 154 126 27 1
6899 Wouldn't it be easier to have him tailed by a private-eye? 1.1883 0.03541 154 128 23 3
6900 Do you think they offer reusable straws? 1.1882 0.03636 170 144 20 6
6901 I'd like to propose a toast - don't forget to lift your mask. 1.1882 0.03439 170 142 24 4
6902 Creative anachronism just my luck. And by the way straws have been banned. 1.1882 0.03230 170 140 28 2
6903 You look distressed, actually, that’s my fantasy, but not in that sort of way. 1.1882 0.03439 170 142 24 4
6904 The "Blind Date" site wasn't specific. 1.1882 0.03253 186 155 27 4
6905 Cheesy atmosphere and cheap wine make knights like this awful. 1.1882 0.03341 186 156 25 5
6906 One minute you’re their entryway novelty, the next you’re ordering off their menu! 1.1879 0.03284 165 136 27 2
6907 Knight of amour on the night of armour 1.1879 0.03284 165 136 27 2
6908 I said "Wouldn't it be fun to go out tonight" 1.1879 0.03605 165 139 21 5
6909 I just couldn't stand the sense of vulnerability any more. Be grateful I didn't get a Glock Agatha. 1.1879 0.03805 165 141 17 7
6910 I know women say they want a knight in shining armor, but this is ridiculous!" Nina Cameron, Belleville, Ontario, Canad 1.1878 0.03398 181 152 24 5
6911 Ok, ok, your just another dating site jerk, aren’t you? You seem older than your profile pic. 1.1878 0.03487 181 153 22 6
6912 so you are my knight in shining armor, but do you love me? 1.1875 0.03264 176 146 27 3
6913 Those left wing lunatics are not going to throw me out of this restaurant! 1.1875 0.03813 144 121 19 4
6914 I'm more of a red knight myself. 1.1875 0.03457 176 148 23 5
6915 The Renaissance Faire was last week! 1.1875 0.03100 192 159 30 3
6916 ...and that's why I'm wearing a suit of armor. 1.1875 0.03567 160 134 22 4
6917 Well at least you left your lance in the umbrella stand. 1.1875 0.03264 176 146 27 3
6918 So... this is what life is like in virtual reality. 1.1875 0.03340 160 132 26 2
6919 Wine on a Tuesday? This will be an eventful knight. 1.1875 0.03567 160 134 22 4
6920 Are you happy now? You finally got your Don Quixote fantasy!" 1.1875 0.03220 160 131 28 1
6921 The round table and the gladiator suit were cool but trying to sip the wine in the visor is a challenger. 1.1875 0.03163 176 145 29 2
6922 I had a bet with my friend that I would stay in a knight's costume for five years. I don't give up on a challenge. 1.1875 0.04178 144 124 13 7
6923 Lovely bouquet but the finish is a bit too flinty. 1.1871 0.03520 171 144 22 5
6924 It's difficult to remain undercover with you under surveillance. 1.1871 0.03637 155 130 21 4
6925 So, when did you first think you were a victim of the Me-Too Movement? 1.1869 0.03125 198 165 29 4
6926 Thanks, but I'm already vaccinated. 1.1868 0.03469 182 154 22 6
6927 What's left if this is not enough? 1.1868 0.03290 182 152 26 4
6928 So, your profile insists chivalry within the patriarchy isn’t dead? 1.1867 0.03482 166 139 23 4
6929 Sweetheart, stop overthinking your iron intake - wine would have been enough. 1.1867 0.03585 166 140 21 5
6930 I know I am bad with the silverware. 1.1867 0.03482 166 139 23 4
6931 I usually do coffee dates but Mother said take it up a notch and try a knight date...This is good right? 1.1867 0.03266 166 137 27 2
6932 You looked a lot younger in your OKCUPID picture. 1.1867 0.03686 166 141 19 6
6933 I think it's time to say good night 1.1867 0.03152 166 136 29 1
6934 Your armor will not protect you from outrageous fortune. 1.1867 0.03585 166 140 21 5
6935 It's the latest thing in dine-and-dash, 100% waiter proof for those sticky situations 1.1867 0.03829 150 127 18 5
6936 But... I thought you’d wear your Burka Niqab... 1.1867 0.03944 150 128 16 6
6937 Now I feel safe staying out late! 1.1865 0.03172 193 161 28 4
6938 Sure, it's a round table, but you never had a lot of a lance. 1.1864 0.03345 177 148 25 4
6939 Yes, I did mention that in my profile but... 1.1864 0.03147 177 146 29 2
6940 What? My armor isn't shiny enough? 1.1864 0.03439 177 149 23 5
6941 Do you think you might take the "my knight in shining armor" metaphor a little too seriously? Uh...cheers. 1.1863 0.03547 161 135 22 4
6942 ...If you let me finish, it's because CHIVALRY is how I honor you as a woman. 1.1863 0.03655 161 136 20 5
6943 Well if I did say ‘costume contest’, I probably should apologize. 1.1863 0.03655 161 136 20 5
6944 I’m guessing this is not King Arthur’s round table? 1.1860 0.03501 172 145 22 5
6945 I hope the chef doesn't find out that your horse is tethered out back. 1.1860 0.03501 172 145 22 5
6946 I wanted to dress for the occasion but my other suit was at the dry cleaner 1.1860 0.03301 172 143 26 3
6947 So you’re going to me that chivalry isn’t dead, right? 1.1860 0.03402 172 144 24 4
6948 Yeah like Mike Pence’s rule, unless I’m locked in this. 1.1859 0.03028 199 165 31 3
6949 my knight in shining armor shows up and he is a bore! 1.1859 0.03838 156 133 17 6
6950 Date Night no “K” George. 1.1859 0.03125 156 127 29 0
6951 Will you follow me on Facebook as I ride into battle? 1.1859 0.03616 156 131 21 4
6952 Would three steps in a row kill you? 1.1859 0.03499 156 130 23 3
6953 Dating over 35. 1.1859 0.03499 156 130 23 3
6954 But we're different as Knight and Gaye. 1.1859 0.03616 156 131 21 4
6955 Alcohol might be our worst enemy, but the bible says: love your enemy. 1.1858 0.03452 183 155 22 6
6956 She wonders how to say nicely, the knight shining armour trend is over, but good effort. 1.1856 0.03463 167 140 23 4
6957 I care. I’ve always cared. That is why I thought this Napa cab with a hint of tobacco might loosen you up. 1.1856 0.03566 167 141 21 5
6958 I know for sure you are my Knight and shining armour 1.1854 0.03440 151 125 24 2
6959 Ready for Halloween ? 1.1854 0.03806 151 128 18 5
6960 The waiter has assured me this mead is finely aged. 1.1854 0.03440 151 125 24 2
6961 I feel you. 1.1854 0.03421 178 150 23 5
6962 When you said you were a knight person in your profile, I took you seriously, not literally. 1.1854 0.02921 178 145 33 0
6963 A glass of wine will not kill you! 1.1854 0.03231 178 148 27 3
6964 I liked wine. I still like wine. 1.1852 0.03527 162 136 22 4
6965 It could provide a truly religious experience if it were served in that Holy Grail that you promised to bring back from your crusade. 1.1852 0.03839 162 139 16 7
6966 I liked the roleplaying better when you were the it. 1.1850 0.03384 173 145 24 4
6967 "I think I may have gotten it wrong..." 1.1850 0.03384 173 145 24 4
6968 First date, what's he come up with? Merlot in a wine bar. Such a cliche. 1.1850 0.03482 173 146 22 5
6969 You should probably order the gazpacho. 1.1848 0.02971 184 151 32 1
6970 This might be over the top,but I feel like my masculinity is under attack 1.1848 0.03257 184 154 26 4
6971 I know trash islands are bad, but sometimes you just need a straw! 1.1848 0.03347 184 155 24 5
6972 Who knew you would be so dull. 1.1848 0.03434 184 156 22 6
6973 Think about the turtles before ordering that straw! 1.1848 0.03347 184 155 24 5
6974 Earlier, on a Sunday evening in the Village, Adele commiserated with Lance on his being middle-aged. 1.1847 0.03479 157 131 23 3
6975 Your reputation as a nasty, violent drunk precedes you. 1.1847 0.03479 157 131 23 3
6976 Honey, Halloween isn’t until the end of the month! 1.1847 0.03594 157 132 21 4
6977 You may have misunderstood my request for a night out. 1.1846 0.04199 130 111 14 5
6978 Next time I’ll bring my own straw. 1.1845 0.03339 168 140 25 3
6979 MYSTERIOUS ENCOUNTER ( An eye for an eye, touth for touth ). Milady: "Who are you, mysterious knight in armor ?. Knight: " I am an old and honest politician. And you Milady ?. Milady: "I am an old prostitute. I am a virgin ".... 1.1845 0.04017 168 147 11 10
6980 Alice, you're probably wondering why I asked you to meet me here. 1.1845 0.03339 168 140 25 3
6981 You're cold as knight. 1.1845 0.03231 168 139 27 2
6982 I appreciate your sense of caution, but never on the first date. 1.1845 0.03444 168 141 23 4
6983 This isn't what I had in mind when you told me you'd show me a good night. 1.1845 0.03444 168 141 23 4
6984 Don't you think you're coming on a but strong? 1.1845 0.03339 168 140 25 3
6985 A metallic taste?d 1.1844 0.03310 179 150 25 4
6986 Blind date #28: "Have you seen 'Kate and Leopold'? 1.1844 0.03310 179 150 25 4
6987 Cheers to my knight in shining armor. 1.1842 0.03545 152 127 22 3
6988 I'm on a crusade. No #Mer lot. 1.1842 0.03102 190 158 29 3
6989 I’ve never dated a knight in shining armor. 1.1842 0.03666 152 128 20 4
6990 I thought this was "Wine Night". 1.1840 0.03397 163 136 24 3
6991 Are you sure you're my wife? My memory is a bit rusty. I think I'll wear a business suit for Halloween. You don't have to save every princess. Lancelot is your name not your nightly right. How could you lose the can opener? You 1.1840 0.03507 163 137 22 4
6992 Yes, dilly dilly, whatever you say. 1.1840 0.03507 163 137 22 4
6993 I always order Armour hot dogs. 1.1839 0.03266 174 145 26 3
6994 Are you on a diet? 1.1839 0.03163 174 144 28 2
6995 I don't date much, I usually work knights. Very punny. 1.1839 0.03366 174 146 24 4
6996 So, are you my knight in shining armor or just a kook who has a major identity problem? 1.1835 0.03340 158 131 25 2
6997 No! You can't have a straw! 1.1835 0.03340 158 131 25 2
6998 I clearly said get one vent or none, not two! 1.1835 0.03574 158 133 21 4
6999 Oh hell. I forgot to smuggle in straws. 1.1835 0.03459 158 132 23 3
7000 Jousting? Funny you should ask. 1.1834 0.03321 169 141 25 3
7001 Guess I can’t dispute your chivalrous claim on the websitez 1.1834 0.03425 169 142 23 4
7002 Well, how do like the wine?” “It’s joust okay” 1.1834 0.03425 169 142 23 4
7003 You may not be a Neanderthal but I'd say medieval is definitely in play. 1.1834 0.03102 169 139 29 1
7004 Its just an era-pic. 1.1834 0.03213 169 140 27 2
7005 You're my delusional knight in shining armor. 1.1833 0.03294 180 151 25 4
7006 THE HEAD GEAR CURBES MY APPETITE. 1.1833 0.03386 180 152 23 5
7007 Thank you for sharing your vintage wine. 1.1831 0.03821 142 120 18 4
7008 I say it's a medieval soup strainer, why do you ask? 1.1830 0.03644 153 129 20 4
7009 I’ll ask our server to bring you a straw. 1.1829 0.03378 164 137 24 3
7010 You have a great chance to win best costume at halloween or the booby hatch ! 1.1829 0.03487 164 138 22 4
7011 It’s got a wobbly leg but I must say, I quite like the shape. 1.1829 0.03378 164 137 24 3
7012 Really? I took a Beano. 1.1829 0.03696 164 140 18 6
7013 And how did he die..? 1.1829 0.03378 164 137 24 3
7014 This is not what I meant by 'girl's night out'. 1.1829 0.03040 175 144 30 1
7015 Dinner is on me, but don’t expect me to be your knight in shining armor. 1.1829 0.03540 175 149 20 6
7016 Regrets, forgot you were coming right from work... let's get you straw. 1.1829 0.03147 175 145 28 2
7017 It's just my mother... 1.1828 0.03133 186 155 28 3
7018 But I asked for a night of pining amour. 1.1824 0.03770 159 136 17 6
7019 I can’t take you sharp barbs anymore. 1.1824 0.03321 159 132 25 2
7020 Always a red with spaghetti. 1.1824 0.03439 159 133 23 3
7021 There's nothing that makes me prouder than being your sommelier in shining armor. 1.1824 0.03321 159 132 25 2
7022 I’m just the aroma guy. Our taster has chain-mail. 1.1824 0.03439 159 133 23 3
7023 So, your armor's not very shiny. 1.1824 0.03196 170 141 27 2
7024 Don’t think they had straws back in King Arthur’s time. 1.1824 0.03303 170 142 25 3
7025 oh,so your burka is sat the cleaners? 1.1824 0.03303 170 142 25 3
7026 "Mr. Knight in the literal sense, dating you is impossible," 1.1823 0.02983 181 149 31 1
7027 Well anyway it was knice to meet you, but I don’t think this is going to work out. 1.1823 0.03084 181 150 29 2
7028 Either you promise to not stab me or I’ll need to ask for a straw. 1.1823 0.03459 181 154 21 6
7029 Knights dining on white satin doesn't have the same ring to it as Nights on White Satin does. 1.1818 0.03622 154 130 20 4
7030 Why weren’t you at that party in 1982? 1.1818 0.03622 154 130 20 4
7031 I know my dating profile said I was older, but there’s the white horse thing, too. 1.1818 0.03360 165 138 24 3
7032 Are you sure you should be drinking on the job? These feet won't sweep themselves. 1.1818 0.03248 165 137 26 2
7033 What if a toast is better than sex? 1.1818 0.03248 165 137 26 2
7034 How do I know I can trust you? 1.1813 0.03489 171 145 21 5
7035 You should have ordered a straw for your wine! 1.1813 0.03389 171 144 23 4
7036 Stop judging. We got service, didn't we? 1.1813 0.03286 171 143 25 3
7037 I didn’t think my knight in shining armor would be so distant. 1.1813 0.03489 171 145 21 5
7038 Somehow I think you’ve defeated the concept of speed dating. 1.1813 0.03489 171 145 21 5
7039 I wanted to do the honorable thing. 1.1813 0.02955 171 140 31 0
7040 'Methinks Quaffing is not your Strong Suit" 1.1812 0.03302 160 133 25 2
7041 You went a little over the top with the honorary title 1.1812 0.03055 160 131 29 0
7042 I was having a bad day, looks like the knight is no better 1.1812 0.03570 149 125 21 3
7043 I’m quite the tin man as you know but I’m afraid tonight I shall need a straw. 1.1808 0.03114 177 147 28 2
7044 I begin to see windmills 1.1808 0.03216 177 148 26 3
7045 Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? 1.1808 0.03410 177 150 22 5
7046 Because your profile said you wanted a knight in shining armor... why did you swipe right? 1.1807 0.03341 166 139 24 3
7047 Fearful of victimhood, Lance prepared for anyone who might put a 'shiv' in 'chivalry.' 1.1807 0.03341 166 139 24 3
7048 Look, being gay isn't the Big Thing it used to be . 1.1807 0.03449 166 140 22 4
7049 Sorry, but your armor isn't shiny. 1.1807 0.03230 166 138 26 2
7050 I was hoping for a little more shine. 1.1806 0.03715 155 132 18 5
7051 When you ask for a knight and relized you spelt the wrong work on your online profile. 1.1806 0.03360 155 129 24 2
7052 You get so defensive when I mention that high school party! 1.1806 0.03600 155 131 20 4
7053 According to my friends and family, my baggage is at least as effective. 1.1806 0.04022 144 124 14 6
7054 So you think the only thing that shines now is my armour? 1.1806 0.03772 144 122 18 4
7055 Yes, you are a knight in armor, but its not shining! 1.1806 0.03641 144 121 20 3
7056 Let's see. Vegan, non-GMO, Glutin-free, wanna to hear more? 1.1804 0.03044 194 162 29 3
7057 Let's get our DNA tested. 1.1803 0.03335 183 155 23 5
7058 If they overcharge us, I'll joust them for the bill. 1.1803 0.02953 183 151 31 1
7059 You would not believe the negativity I have endured from others in waiting to meet you. 1.1803 0.03150 183 153 27 3
7060 With global warming, your armor will feel like the fire breathing dragon. 1.1802 0.03470 172 146 21 5
7061 Ditch the ‘knight in shining armor’ approach. 1.1801 0.03512 161 136 21 4
7062 this is not a medieval restaurant FYI 1.1801 0.03400 161 135 23 3
7063 Looks like you could use a straw. Order one 8 inch rigatoni, raw. 1.1801 0.03621 161 137 19 5
7064 Actually I’m more of an early bird... 1.1801 0.03621 161 137 19 5
7065 Hiding” screams Medieval concept 1.1801 0.03284 161 134 25 2
7066 I thought you meant "girls' night out." 1.1801 0.03284 161 134 25 2
7067 I meant for you to take me seriously, not literally, that you are my knight in shiny armor! 1.1801 0.03512 161 136 21 4
7068 This is a lovely night out, but I could have sworn you said "knight joust". 1.1800 0.03548 150 126 21 3
7069 Entree? I thought you said En Garde. 1.1798 0.03297 178 150 24 4
7070 I miss the medieval grace of iron clothing. 1.1798 0.03199 178 149 26 3
7071 The last guy showed up cover in aluminum foil. Do you need a straw? 1.1798 0.03484 178 152 20 6
7072 So this is what the trade war has degenerated into? 1.1798 0.03098 178 148 28 2
7073 No, you are confusing me with someone else. I am the Original Knight Stalker, not to be confused with the Original Night Stalker. 1.1796 0.03213 167 139 26 2
7074 If you’re my knight in shining armor, prove it! 1.1796 0.03323 167 140 24 3
7075 Ever heard of #metoo? No, Gawain, I will not call you "Sir". 1.1795 0.03579 156 132 20 4
7076 Joust how Medieval are you? You ask the waiter for a straw. 1.1795 0.03579 156 132 20 4
7077 You have no idea how tight this suit felt before I let my ponytail roam free! 1.1793 0.03228 184 155 25 4
7078 What would you like Sir Loin? Some steak? 1.1793 0.03874 145 124 16 5
7079 Would you like some pretzels? 1.1793 0.03874 145 124 16 5
7080 I hope they don’t charge by the plate. 1.1792 0.03451 173 147 21 5
7081 Yeah, I guess I'm not cys-generational. 1.1792 0.02924 173 142 31 0
7082 Welcome to your knight sitting at this round table. 1.1792 0.03353 173 146 23 4
7083 Boy, this dinner was like trying to eat spaghetti through a picket fence! I hope to God they have a flexi-straw for my wine! 1.1792 0.03353 173 146 23 4
7084 As my attorney, can you assure me that they won't be able to pierce the veil? 1.1790 0.03146 162 134 27 1
7085 I wouldn't call it an 'issue,' but Merlot is not my favorite. 1.1789 0.03073 190 159 28 3
7086 Let's see, so your profile said you were concerned about STDs? 1.1789 0.03416 190 163 20 7
7087 Nice try but you’re not the knight in shinning armour that I’m looking for. 1.1789 0.03416 190 163 20 7
7088 I need your help shining my armor. 1.1788 0.03399 151 126 23 2
7089 Arthurian Romance" 1.1788 0.02979 179 148 30 1
7090 So you bought your college party clothes, Anne. 1.1788 0.03083 179 149 28 2
7091 It’s a nice knight out. Get it? 1.1788 0.02979 179 148 30 1
7092 George, you can let down your guard. After three hundred and sixty payments, I deposited the final alimony check this morning. You have earned back my trust and I want to see your face. It’s been 30 years! 1.1788 0.03183 179 150 26 3
7093 I've always prided myself on my boundaries, and they always need defending... 1.1788 0.03083 179 149 28 2
7094 So, you're really into cos-playing Barbara Walters. 1.1788 0.03280 179 151 24 4
7095 Stay in, you said. A night at home, you said... 1.1786 0.03101 196 165 27 4
7096 I know you wish to be called sir but, this is ridiculous. You are no night in shining armour. 1.1784 0.03023 185 154 29 2
7097 You're eyes are as fiery as the flames of a three-horned dragon. Also, I have no pocket for my wallet - can you buy dinner? 1.1783 0.03671 157 134 18 5
7098 Umm, no, my ad did not say Upper West World. 1.1783 0.03671 157 134 18 5
7099 Actually, I've never been hurt before. 1.1783 0.03558 157 133 20 4
7100 I heard the salmon here is good . 1.1782 0.03433 174 148 21 5
7101 First, is is knight" or "dame"? 1.1782 0.03234 174 146 25 3
7102 I was just waiting for my knight in shining armor. 1.1782 0.03234 174 146 25 3
7103 Would you like oil with your olive? 1.1781 0.03596 146 123 20 3
7104 Here we are again. 1.1779 0.03247 163 136 25 2
7105 My armour is my chastity, dear. 1.1779 0.03128 163 135 27 1
7106 Frankly, I. prefer the Japanese. I'm more stimulated. 1.1779 0.03362 163 137 23 3
7107 And they say chivalry is dead, this isn't what I expected when I called you for a 'date night' but I'm having a lovely time. 1.1779 0.03684 163 140 17 6
7108 Luv ya' pony tail, but your hairband is a bit much . . . 1.1778 0.03167 180 151 26 3
7109 It's an aged vintage 1.1775 0.03495 169 144 20 5
7110 Just came back from 1018, and Equal Pay was not an issue. 1.1775 0.03065 169 140 28 1
7111 ... I'm feeling like the barrier between us has become set in steel..." 1.1775 0.03178 169 141 26 2
7112 The knight - the lights went out in Georgia 1.1775 0.03287 169 142 24 3
7113 I always wear this when I drink wines from the Round Table Vineyards. 1.1775 0.03495 169 144 20 5
7114 Chivalry's cancelled. 1.1775 0.03392 169 143 22 4
7115 May I lift my visor and glass in a toast to you, Guinevere? 1.1775 0.03495 169 144 20 5
7116 I think you can do a better job of protecting your heart. 1.1775 0.03495 169 144 20 5
7117 I'm having the Merlot Rust-X blend 1.1775 0.03392 169 143 22 4
7118 That Taylor Swift post was the most eloquent thing I’ve read in ages. 1.1775 0.03495 169 144 20 5
7119 I am your knight in shining armor. 1.1774 0.03104 186 156 27 3
7120 I’d prefer ghosting. 1.1774 0.03104 186 156 27 3
7121 I wish they hadn't banned the burka..... 1.1773 0.03381 141 117 23 1
7122 Just because you're the boss at the New Yorker David, I still don't have to sleep with you #me too 1.1772 0.03301 158 132 24 2
7123 So, have you enjoyed your knight? 1.1772 0.03421 158 133 22 3
7124 Let me guess, you love their grilled ham. 1.1772 0.03421 158 133 22 3
7125 Want do you mean you have got to fly to Agincourt tonight... I thought we were going dancing. 1.1772 0.03301 158 132 24 2
7126 I don’t like my dates using straws, why do you ask? 1.1771 0.03217 175 147 25 3
7127 I'm trying to cut back on my wine intake. 1.1771 0.03132 192 162 26 4
7128 When you said you were chivalrous, I didn't know this was what you meant. 1.1771 0.03132 192 162 26 4
7129 No, I get it... you convinced yourself you were waiting for your 'knight in shining armor'... 1.1769 0.03945 147 127 14 6
7130 Henry, I don't mean to be rude, but how many times did you say you'd been married? 1.1769 0.03573 147 124 20 3
7131 When you want to eat dinner at night, but they misunderstood. 1.1768 0.03111 164 136 27 1
7132 My knight in shining armor. You're not. 1.1768 0.03431 181 155 20 6
7133 Would you prefer a straw? Paper or plastic? 1.1768 0.03247 181 153 24 4
7134 The salesman said my wife would love this suit. 1.1768 0.03151 181 152 26 3
7135 Is this the LARP Mixer? 1.1768 0.03247 181 153 24 4
7136 I’m making a rude hand gesture under the table. 1.1765 0.03374 170 144 22 4
7137 I was a handsome vampire last year. 1.1765 0.03049 170 141 28 1
7138 This is much better, thanks, but I can still smell your breath through the holes in your mask. 1.1765 0.03574 170 146 18 6
7139 The you said errant knight seeking LTR,you weren't kidding. 1.1765 0.03476 170 145 20 5
7140 Why, when we discuss certain subjects, do you seem so distant? 1.1765 0.03476 170 145 20 5
7141 No dear, surprise me -- you choose the nightclub and I will meet you there! 1.1765 0.03161 170 142 26 2
7142 Honey just because it’s halloween doesn’t mean you can wear your armor to dinner 1.1765 0.03228 153 127 25 1
7143 If her asks for a straw I'm leaving 1.1762 0.02939 193 161 30 2
7144 I appreciate the Knight in Shining Armour pitch but on a first date I would have preferred a cab rather than being spirited away on fiery steed. 1.1761 0.03397 176 150 21 5
7145 My lawyer recommended that I protect myself on the first couple dates. 1.1761 0.03402 159 134 22 3
7146 This knight out on the town isn't working as I thought it would. 1.1761 0.03736 159 137 16 6
7147 So we have different views as to what constitutes ‘shining’ armor. 1.1761 0.03283 159 133 24 2
7148 My jousting elbow hurts so bad - I can hardly lift the glass... 1.1758 0.03434 165 140 21 4
7149 So I guess you’re not dead 1.1758 0.03211 165 138 25 2
7150 I hope your steak is rare enough for you. 1.1757 0.03551 148 125 20 3
7151 I hate to keep meeting like this but my life as a spy, at the British embassy, for many years, and living at 221B Baker St. makes it very difficult. 1.1757 0.03801 148 127 16 5
7152 No, silly, you can't drink through a straw 1.1756 0.03672 131 110 19 2
7153 Yeh...I wish I'd dressed like you when I was partying in my youth... 1.1755 0.02979 188 157 29 2
7154 The new security levels might have a few chinks when it comes to amour. 1.1754 0.03356 171 145 22 4
7155 Why you trying to act like you were drinking sparking water before you came out here? 1.1754 0.03144 171 143 26 2
7156 Listen, I’ve really enjoyed our time together, but I have to protect my heart. 1.1753 0.03584 154 131 19 4
7157 Nothing's better for health and metal-bolism than a knightly glass of red wine 1.1753 0.03464 154 130 21 3
7158 Sorry, this is not steed dating 1.1751 0.03379 177 151 21 5
7159 You seem a little too hard headed for me. 1.1751 0.03379 177 151 21 5
7160 I've been seeing a furry. 1.1751 0.03379 177 151 21 5
7161 I was expecting dinner by candle LIGHT. 1.1750 0.03382 160 135 22 3
7162 No, really, now that #MeToo is a thing, I think you were already pretty safe. 1.1750 0.03264 160 134 24 2
7163 Damsel in distress? No I’m wearing pants 1.1749 0.03214 183 155 24 4
7164 I see Congress found you a nice intervention for the Supreme Court seat. 1.1747 0.03194 166 139 25 2
7165 Lovely night out isn't it? 1.1747 0.03077 166 138 27 1
7166 Don't worry, honey - the suit doesn't include a chastity belt. 1.1747 0.03520 166 142 19 5
7167 I see, like me, you’re not interested in a long term relationship. 1.1747 0.03077 166 138 27 1
7168 Wine is about history and culture, but don’t you think you’re taking this a step too far? 1.1745 0.03655 149 127 18 4
7169 I WOULD LOVE TO STAY ALL KNIGHT. 1.1745 0.03777 149 128 16 5
7170 comes earlier every year. 1.1744 0.03338 172 146 22 4
7171 Sure, building a wall is a medieval thing, but will all the border patrol have to dress like that? 1.1744 0.03172 195 166 24 5
7172 Hi, my name is Steve, I’m a Gemini and I can sense that your sign is in the second moon of I’m not getting you. 1.1742 0.03791 155 134 15 6
7173 Yes, I remember, before the meetoo movement we had armor. 1.1742 0.03319 155 130 23 2
7174 I like this place.They keep a monogrammed straw just for me. 1.1742 0.03167 178 150 25 3
7175 Between night and day? You are the one. 1.1739 0.03363 161 136 22 3
7176 This isn't exactly what I had in mind for date night. 1.1739 0.03123 161 134 26 1
7177 No you misunderstood me, I said “my ex is a witch.” 1.1739 0.03476 161 137 20 4
7178 I’m the knight of this round table. 1.1739 0.03104 184 155 26 3
7179 I think I need new glasses. 1.1739 0.03363 161 136 22 3
7180 I’d appreciate your opinion of this wine, but I understand your inability to respond 1.1737 0.03288 167 141 23 3
7181 Where's your lance? 1.1737 0.03060 167 139 27 1
7182 Does ‘portcullis’ rhyme with ‘Chablis’? 1.1737 0.03500 167 143 19 5
7183 Tupac, why do you always insist on wearing that every time we go out in public? 1.1734 0.03517 173 149 18 6
7184 My life has been nothing but a lot of hard knocks. 1.1733 0.03242 150 125 24 1
7185 I'm not so sure you're meant to be *my* knight in shining armor. 1.1733 0.03507 150 127 20 3
7186 Yes, my love. I know it seems medieval but if I an unmasked I might have to pay $500 mil in interest in back taxes. 1.1732 0.03249 179 152 23 4
7187 I told you to wear Under Armor to accentuate your Cross Fit physique not Over Armor my Amour. 1.1732 0.03344 179 153 21 5
7188 How accurate was your Tinder profile? 1.1732 0.03249 179 152 23 4
7189 So... do you have any brothers or sisters? 1.1732 0.03527 179 155 17 7
7190 Relax... I said I wasn't a lesbian... 1.1732 0.03151 179 151 25 3
7191 I'm a total extrovert. You, maybe not so much... 1.1731 0.03300 156 131 23 2
7192 I asked for a great night, not for a knight who can't even drink. 1.1731 0.03541 156 133 19 4
7193 'The dating service thinks you are just another hurt little boy.' 1.1730 0.03088 185 156 26 3
7194 So I asked my therapist, "Why does every woman I know accuse me of benevolent sexism? I'm just trying to help!" 1.1730 0.03182 185 157 24 4
7195 I know what you’re thinking, but MEDIEVAL does not mean EVIL. 1.1728 0.03227 162 136 24 2
7196 My tinder profile said I was into chains, not chainmail” 1.1728 0.03106 162 135 26 1
7197 I don't want just any straw, I want one of those Cray-Z straws. 1.1728 0.03344 162 137 22 3
7198 You.ve taken the metaphor way beyond my comfort zone." Barbara Druskoff Fallbrook,CA druskoff@att.ne 1.1728 0.03456 162 138 20 4
7199 You should smile more. I might have saved you earlier. 1.1728 0.03344 162 137 22 3
7200 ... 1.1728 0.03566 162 139 18 5
7201 Too much light makes me sneeze. 1.1728 0.03227 162 136 24 2
7202 As you saw on my Match.com profile — I consider myself a 21st century Knight" 1.1728 0.02937 191 160 29 2
7203 Who knew filibustering came in your size? 1.1726 0.03270 168 142 23 3
7204 Although most people don’t use a straw at a blind date wine tasting, that might be the chivalrous thing to do. 1.1724 0.03302 174 148 22 4
7205 I don't know why speed dating is working out for me. 1.1724 0.03200 174 147 24 3
7206 I never heard of a semi-blind taste test. 1.1724 0.03296 145 121 23 1
7207 Do you really think a cheap trick like this will work?? 1.1722 0.03034 180 151 27 2
7208 You get so sensitive when it comes to refreshing the room. 1.1722 0.03610 151 129 18 4
7209 Your picture on the Date Site was absent; however, I was taken in by your comments about your favorite activities and romantic evenings, such manly interests, yet a fan of sensitive moments. That said, off with the helmet Ivanhoe or I'm out of here! 1.1722 0.03847 151 131 14 6
7210 Look I'm sorry I don't thank you enough for holding the door open but this is just ridiculous 1.1720 0.03280 157 132 23 2
7211 Tell me about your work at the NRA in brand expansion.... 1.1719 0.03275 192 165 21 6
7212 Tom, you’re a wonderful knight in armor, it’s just not shiny enough for me. 1.1718 0.03325 163 138 22 3
7213 Darling, you had me at Q X N. 1.1718 0.03209 163 137 24 2
7214 Scrub Daddy. Why? 1.1718 0.03209 163 137 24 2
7215 Because you have a lot of iron in your diet really isn't that funny. 1.1718 0.03437 163 139 20 4
7216 No more for me, Sir Knight. I've had enough Lancers. 1.1716 0.03252 169 143 23 3
7217 This wine is oaked, but I prefer steel aging myself. 1.1716 0.03562 169 146 17 6
7218 I don’t mean to be picky, but I but your armor isn’t exactly shining. 1.1714 0.03285 175 149 22 4
7219 Sorry Lance, but this just isn't living up to the hype. 1.1714 0.03078 175 147 26 2
7220 Well, I'm your knight in armor ---- who can't drink. 1.1714 0.03183 175 148 24 3
7221 I love the Middle Ages. Just don't ask me to wear wool. 1.1714 0.03285 175 149 22 4
7222 Sorry, shiny armor does not give a free pass for not talking out the garbage. 1.1714 0.03285 175 149 22 4
7223 Well i guess the match gives you what you're wishing for! 1.1712 0.03553 146 124 19 3
7224 Before you ask, no I'm not "into metal." I much prefer Nightcore. 1.1712 0.03683 146 125 17 4
7225 But in your profile, you said you were looking for a man who can get hard 1.1711 0.02962 187 157 28 2
7226 I don’t know why you insist on ordering yourself a glass of wine which you can’t drink. 1.1711 0.03465 152 129 20 3
7227 Are you ready to become a knight of the round table? 1.1711 0.03465 152 129 20 3
7228 I was asking about this dress and not about being is in distress. 1.1711 0.03588 152 130 18 4
7229 You weren’t wearing the armor in your profile picture 1.1707 0.03417 164 140 20 4
7230 You know what, Sheila? I’m really tired of your ‘I told you so’ attitude! 1.1707 0.03525 164 141 18 5
7231 It only took till desert for Margery to realize that not all suits shined. 1.1707 0.03072 164 137 26 1
7232 The straws were plastic. 1.1707 0.03306 164 139 22 3
7233 I told you it was going to rain,now no food for you tonight. 1.1707 0.03830 164 144 12 8
7234 [How disappointing, she thought] My only "date-night" this week, and he's vegetarian. 1.1707 0.03132 205 176 23 6
7235 Well shut my mouth! 1.1706 0.03340 170 145 21 4
7236 You certainly went medieval on your outfit 1.1706 0.03125 170 143 25 2
7237 When I said I'd like to meet a knightly and chivalrous man, I was figuratively speaking... 1.1705 0.03167 176 149 24 3
7238 I booked through TripadVisor. 1.1703 0.03199 182 155 23 4
7239 NOT my idea of a romantic night. 1.1703 0.03199 182 155 23 4
7240 Shouldn't you use a straw? 1.1702 0.03623 141 120 18 3
7241 Looks to me like your armor could use a shine. 1.1702 0.03225 188 161 22 5
7242 I may be your white knight, but I prefer red wine. 1.1701 0.03256 147 123 23 1
7243 I think that you are being hypersensitive. On Passover, my father always asks, "Why is this night different from all other nights?" 1.1699 0.03567 153 131 18 4
7244 I see you're staring. It's true, I head up the green team at Medieval Times. 1.1698 0.03117 159 133 25 1
7245 Honey, I’m sure they will reauthorize the Violence Against Women act. 1.1698 0.03592 159 137 17 5
7246 Surely we can resolve our differences without the folderol. 1.1697 0.03173 165 139 24 2
7247 Sweetie, that's not what I meant when I said I was looking forward to a good night with you. 1.1697 0.03505 165 142 18 5
7248 I gave up on your type years ago, but I think I’ll keep your horse 1.1696 0.02878 171 142 29 0
7249 You said you were looking for a special Knight together! 1.1696 0.02995 171 143 27 1
7250 Through the Bevor, over the Chain Mail, watch out Tummy here it comes. 1.1696 0.03217 171 145 23 3
7251 ARE'NT YOU WORRIED THAT WINE MIGHT RUST YOU? 1.1696 0.03217 171 145 23 3
7252 Armored Vintner--it is all the rage. 1.1695 0.03251 177 151 22 4
7253 I'm thinking a nice glass of merlot might lower my defenses and enable me to engage with you. 1.1695 0.03150 177 150 24 3
7254 Madame, I can't go on like this, get me another straw ! 1.1695 0.03150 177 150 24 3
7255 Sorry, just got back from a high fantasy cartoon in Mad and didn’t have time to change. 1.1694 0.03087 183 155 25 3
7256 Thanks for the wine, but sometimes you joust know if it’s going to work or not. This is one of those times. 1.1693 0.03209 189 162 22 5
7257 This is my response to #MeToo and the screeching harpies. The M-1 Abrams is parked around the corner. 1.1688 0.03663 154 133 16 5
7258 Well, I guess I can delete my tinder account know. 1.1688 0.03166 154 129 24 1
7259 Would you remove you chastity belt. I am your knight in shining armor! 1.1687 0.03224 160 135 23 2
7260 I have to admit, I was expecting a vampire with all of the night talk. 1.1687 0.03344 160 136 21 3
7261 The retro look is in this season 1.1687 0.03379 166 142 20 4
7262 So, tomorrow I'll just do a steak. 1.1687 0.03269 166 141 22 3
7263 Hello I am your date tonight but can you guess who I am? 1.1686 0.03200 172 146 23 3
7264 I can see why you gave up on martinis. 1.1686 0.03200 172 146 23 3
7265 Yeah, sure, sure. 1.1685 0.03134 178 151 24 3
7266 "Any man that makes a pass at you now is probably gay." 1.1685 0.03072 184 156 25 3
7267 Rachel Maddow is brilliant and funny and would love my knight-on-the-town suit. 1.1684 0.03014 190 161 26 3
7268 Where is my straw? 1.1684 0.02958 196 166 27 3
7269 I've always said, "The nose is everything!" 1.1677 0.03403 155 132 20 3
7270 A costume doesn’t make it any less dead. 1.1677 0.03325 161 137 21 3
7271 I'm your knight in shining armor, so can I get a plastic straw already? 1.1677 0.03439 161 138 19 4
7272 ...to avoid the blush. 1.1677 0.02954 161 134 27 0
7273 I’ll be glad to drink your wine! 1.1677 0.03325 161 137 21 3
7274 Armor won’t be a valid defense 1.1677 0.03325 161 137 21 3
7275 You'll never have to worry about contracting viruses from me. 1.1677 0.03251 167 142 22 3
7276 You didn't say anything about my armor. Is it not shiny enough?” 1.1677 0.03569 167 145 16 6
7277 You know, this wasn't exactly what I expected when my husband suggested we have a date night 1.1677 0.03360 167 143 20 4
7278 You are now my knight tarnished armor 1.1677 0.03251 167 142 22 3
7279 It's all about work-life balance. 1.1677 0.03251 167 142 22 3
7280 Yes, I read your profile ... I just thought you like doing things after hours. 1.1677 0.03466 167 144 18 5
7281 Beth are you trying to make the point that there are no more "Knights in Shining Armor" 1.1676 0.02964 173 145 27 1
7282 You must really save on dry cleaning bills.” And 1.1676 0.03075 173 146 25 2
7283 A Knight in Shining Armour, I’m not. 1.1676 0.03015 179 151 26 2
7284 And then I said, Armour? I hardly know her!...anyways what’s your favorite type of trebuchet? 1.1676 0.03057 185 157 25 3
7285 If I'm not mistaken, I believe the waiter gave me your Malbec. 1.1675 0.03197 197 170 21 6
7286 I thought my friend was kidding about me having a "knight in shining armor" when she set up this blind date. 1.1667 0.03942 144 126 12 6
7287 When you told me you’d be “my knight in armor,” I didn’t expect you to mean it so literally. 1.1667 0.02948 174 146 27 1
7288 This is not exactly what I had in mind when I said I wanted somebody who was open about who he was. 1.1667 0.03166 174 148 23 3
7289 Honey, I'm a male mailman dressed in chain mail heading for a maelstrom delivery! 1.1667 0.03059 174 147 25 2
7290 I’ve always wondered how a knight drinks wine 1.1667 0.03465 150 128 19 3
7291 My speed dating preference was for SHINING armor and frankly this conversation has been rather dull. 1.1667 0.03817 144 125 14 5
7292 Always nice to meet another esquire 1.1667 0.03296 180 155 20 5
7293 Oh, now I know what you meant when you said you were old fashion on Tinder 1.1667 0.03166 174 148 23 3
7294 When I asked if you were free tonite, I didn't mean . . . 1.1667 0.03414 144 122 20 2
7295 First it's women in pants, and now body armor. What's next? 1.1667 0.03121 168 142 24 2
7296 Can't we split the bill for once? 1.1667 0.03447 168 145 18 5
7297 It will never work out. I'm a screwdriver and you're a rusty nail! 1.1667 0.03420 162 139 19 4
7298 And some say "chivalry is red". 1.1667 0.03102 180 153 24 3
7299 I just raised my arm to stretch, the gavel came down, and the rest is history. How's the mead? 1.1667 0.03233 168 143 22 3
7300 A mom spending time with her son 1.1667 0.03466 174 151 17 6
7301 Knight in shining armor forever? 1.1667 0.02948 174 146 27 1
7302 I assumed you knew what you were getting into using Mail-nder. 1.1667 0.03269 174 149 21 4
7303 It’s Plot Armor. 1.1667 0.03420 162 139 19 4
7304 Deep inside I prefer a double blind date 1.1667 0.03188 162 137 23 2
7305 I give this only an 89, which is still 10 points higher than your Halloween costume, Buster. 1.1667 0.03005 168 141 26 1
7306 So, Mr. Lance-a-Lot, I see you're really into heavy metal. I guess what they say is true - in vino veritas. 1.1667 0.03188 162 137 23 2
7307 No, I don't think your visor makes a very good sieve. Besides the wine was decanted without sediment and cork bits. 1.1667 0.03342 168 144 20 4
7308 Thou must not enjoy Halloween, eh? ... I don't think this is going to work. 1.1667 0.03227 186 160 21 5
7309 This is (a) great (K)night. 1.1667 0.03333 150 127 21 2
7310 It seems that you just want to mail this conversation in. 1.1658 0.02830 187 157 29 1
7311 It’s just another way to FEND off your attacks on me 1.1657 0.02985 181 153 26 2
7312 Knights in shining armor need a straw to drink their wine 1.1657 0.03279 181 156 20 5
7313 This is what I call a Real Knightcap. 1.1657 0.03252 175 150 21 4
7314 My biggest fault? I'm two knights. 1.1657 0.03149 175 149 23 3
7315 The knight progresses with shine. 1.1657 0.02989 169 142 26 1
7316 Your resume said you ot your start in "digital marketing." 1.1656 0.03170 163 138 23 2
7317 Why can't I ask to split the check? 1.1649 0.02770 194 163 30 1
7318 Sir Dinadan, I have to be going now and it was nice to meet you in armor. 1.1649 0.03283 188 163 19 6
7319 I really appreciate you going out of your way to be the perfect date, but your armor is a little too shiny. 1.1648 0.03070 182 155 24 3
7320 Just when I was ready to remove my shield. 1.1648 0.02970 182 154 26 2
7321 This is not how I imagined the romantic night out part. 1.1648 0.03168 182 156 22 4
7322 If think there's going to be French kissing, think again! 1.1648 0.03262 182 157 20 5
7323 I'm promoting #MeToo by actualizing an alternative. 1.1647 0.03198 170 145 22 3
7324 Really?! My knight in shining armor? You're positively Medieval! 1.1647 0.02973 170 143 26 1
7325 So when's the last time you called your Mother? 1.1647 0.03305 170 146 20 4
7326 So where should spend New Years, Westeros or Kings Landing? 1.1647 0.03198 170 145 22 3
7327 I know your profile said you still believed in chivalry but I just want to make sure it's you. 1.1646 0.03152 164 139 23 2
7328 You'll have to excuse me, I haven't been on an obscured vision date in a long time. 1.1646 0.03268 164 140 21 3
7329 I thought I was being invited out for a night at Round Table, not an evening at Pizza Hut. 1.1646 0.03687 158 138 14 6
7330 I'm glad our relationship doesn't make you feel vulnerable anymore. 1.1646 0.02959 158 132 26 0
7331 WHY DO I ALWAYS GET THE DULL ONES? 1.1645 0.03293 152 129 21 2
7332 I've found it very helpful in determining long-term compatibility. 1.1645 0.03548 152 131 17 4
7333 Sarah, you can’t expect me to believe you’re not getting a little tired of this. 1.1642 0.03058 201 173 23 5
7334 Are you my knight in shining armor? 1.1639 0.03055 183 156 24 3
7335 If you don't like merlot, we can always have a joust instead. 1.1638 0.03011 177 150 25 2
7336 I am the Roséwave Knight 1.1638 0.03116 177 151 23 3
7337 Really Justice Kavanaugh, I'm not like that tramp Christine Blasey Ford. I have no intention of accusing you of anything. 1.1637 0.03490 171 149 16 6
7338 It appears that you enjoy really old wines 1.1637 0.03181 171 146 22 3
7339 Must everyone know your salary when we go out? 1.1637 0.03490 171 149 16 6
7340 Looking forward to my date with my knight in shiny armor 1.1636 0.03134 165 140 23 2
7341 Sorry, this not working, my knight in shining armor needs more sparkle. 1.1636 0.03362 165 142 19 4
7342 I thought you meant a law suit against the Armour meat packing company. 1.1635 0.03555 159 138 16 5
7343 The suit helps me defend my emotional walls 1.1635 0.03555 159 138 16 5
7344 Is that get up really supposed to protect you and #metoo? 1.1635 0.03555 159 138 16 5
7345 I knew the King Arthur movie was a mistake 1.1634 0.03139 153 129 23 1
7346 Well I guess there isn't going to be a second date... 1.1634 0.03139 153 129 23 1
7347 Your friends? But the agency just said 'night date with Arthur'? 1.1633 0.03350 147 125 20 2
7348 It's corked." 1.1629 0.03100 178 152 23 3
7349 I meant an emotional one 1.1629 0.02888 178 150 27 1
7350 Let me guess, Trump said you should. 1.1629 0.03298 178 154 19 5
7351 I’m not certain you’re what I’m looking for. 1.1628 0.03055 172 146 24 2
7352 Thanks for meeting me during my break here at the castle... and the outfit means my wife's friends will never know it's me! 1.1628 0.03270 172 148 20 4
7353 I hope its OK I ordered red? 1.1628 0.03372 172 149 18 5
7354 This is not what I meant when I said let’s meet in the dead of night... 1.1628 0.03055 172 146 24 2
7355 My Knight in Shining Armor ? 1.1627 0.02997 166 140 25 1
7356 Reality Bites. 1.1627 0.03117 166 141 23 2
7357 Look, I did believe you when you said you were a knight of the round table! 1.1625 0.03057 160 135 24 1
7358 I wear this costume out of respect for your involvement in the MeToo movement 1.1625 0.03421 160 138 18 4
7359 Are you holding or folding? 1.1624 0.02824 197 167 28 2
7360 Have you seen Armor Amore? 1.1623 0.03120 154 130 23 1
7361 You forgot a straw? How are you going to drink your wine, then? 1.1623 0.03505 154 133 17 4
7362 Every Friday for the past 20 years, Sheila and Charming have eaten dinner in the same restaurant wearing the same clothes, but today they will let their guard down and take their armor off . 1.1623 0.03381 154 132 19 3
7363 Hey, my profile says gender fluid! 1.1622 0.03188 148 125 22 1
7364 Sometimes women tend to I'm being chauvinistic when they read my dating profile. 1.1622 0.03024 185 158 24 3
7365 Ever since the women's lib movement, knights in shinning armor have gone out of favor. 1.1620 0.02980 179 152 25 2
7366 Do you have a hard-on? 1.1620 0.03467 179 157 15 7
7367 I vowed to never again suffer a broken heart. 1.1618 0.03038 173 147 24 2
7368 How did you know it was mead? 1.1618 0.03147 173 148 22 3
7369 The night the knight wasn't all that bright. 1.1617 0.03100 167 142 23 2
7370 I feel pretty, oh, so pretty . . . 1.1617 0.03100 167 142 23 2
7371 As a matter of fact, I don't like talking politics on the first date. 1.1617 0.03214 167 143 21 3
7372 Cute, but I was looking for a whine night. 1.1615 0.03514 161 140 16 5
7373 I should have met you before dating with my hysband. 1.1615 0.03165 161 137 22 2
7374 The only way I can handle my alkohol problem. 1.1615 0.03133 192 166 21 5
7375 The free Bud Lite is great, but I’m more of a wine guy 1.1613 0.03286 186 162 18 6
7376 You're a knight now. Why are you out of uniform? 1.1611 0.03068 180 154 23 3
7377 No, not a fashion statement. Impulse insurance against overconsumption. 1.1611 0.02965 180 153 25 2
7378 I was told the the horse radish has a real kick to it. 1.1609 0.03130 174 149 22 3
7379 I've waited too long for my knight in shining armor to have to wait for this lasagne. 1.1609 0.03130 174 149 22 3
7380 Tonight you are my knight in shining armor 1.1609 0.03130 174 149 22 3
7381 My "Meet -A-Mate" online picture does me little justice. 1.1608 0.03530 143 123 17 3
7382 Sorry, I meant a holiday party, not a Halloween party. 1.1607 0.03196 168 144 21 3
7383 Shoot! The waiter shoud have brought a straw!!! How am I gonna get rid of him now? 1.1607 0.03083 168 143 23 2
7384 So, do they provide 401k benefits at Medieval Times? 1.1607 0.03615 168 148 13 7
7385 When they see me...they will know it's you. 1.1607 0.03196 168 144 21 3
7386 I didn't have time to shine my armor. Do I still stand a chance? 1.1605 0.03266 162 139 20 3
7387 You never know, the glass could fall and break! 1.1605 0.03266 162 139 20 3
7388 I'm sorry Sir Knight, this isn't your night!!! 1.1605 0.03382 162 140 18 4
7389 Is the bascinet too much? 1.1605 0.03382 162 140 18 4
7390 Get this, Betsy, we all thought you were a dying breed. 1.1605 0.03382 162 140 18 4
7391 Don’t worry, I’ve always had a heart, but still drink. 1.1605 0.03147 162 138 22 2
7392 So..., I guess it isn't dead after all? No,it is quite dead, I'm just afraid of the service here. 1.1600 0.03550 150 130 16 4
7393 Geoffrey, this is your idea of a nightcap? I think we need to talk. 1.1600 0.03217 175 151 20 4
7394 - Have you been medieval courting long? - No, this is actually my first date. 1.1600 0.03318 175 152 18 5
7395 Your profile said you're a night person, but what kind of music do you like? 1.1600 0.03114 175 150 22 3
7396 Drinking this wine with you has been a vintage strain. 1.1600 0.03288 150 128 20 2
7397 The new Kavanaugh line of dating apparel for men gets 50 votes thumbs up and 48 thumbs down. 1.1598 0.03288 169 146 19 4
7398 Next time keep your mouth shut ! 1.1598 0.03179 169 145 21 3
7399 I think they get an F for customer service: they'l at least offer me a straw. 1.1596 0.03074 188 162 22 4
7400 Yes, I know your Facebook profile did state an interest in medieval history 1.1595 0.03129 163 139 22 2
7401 Some women call this their knightly event. 1.1595 0.03248 163 140 20 3
7402 I hope the waiter comes back soon with that straw I asked for. 1.1595 0.03248 163 140 20 3
7403 Okay, my knight in shining armor. Let's see how you drink up. 1.1595 0.03129 163 139 22 2
7404 We can still be sexy. For example, I'll watch you undress. 1.1595 0.03362 163 141 18 4
7405 I'm just making sure that if this drink is drugged, you can't sexually assault me. 1.1593 0.03323 182 159 17 6
7406 Obviously the tariffs will make it more of an aspirational garment so we plan to market it as a Macy’s exclusive. 1.1592 0.03442 157 136 17 4
7407 I like the plume, but don't you think that's going a little too far? 1.1592 0.03196 157 134 21 2
7408 You won't be able to use your cell phone with that contraption 1.1592 0.02930 157 132 25 0
7409 I should have ordered a Bud Light. 1.1589 0.03268 151 129 20 2
7410 What can I say? The genie said ‘go for it.’ 1.1588 0.03161 170 146 21 3
7411 My Hinge photo is totally accurate. Promise. 1.1587 0.03058 189 163 22 4
7412 I can't figure out if this is date night or the Privileged White Male Protection Program?"--Ashley to Bret 1.1583 0.03718 139 121 14 4
7413 "I wanted a double date too. But my friend's horse was scheduled to race." 1.1582 0.03081 177 152 22 3
7414 Looking for: Elegant Knight. 1.1582 0.03183 177 153 20 4
7415 My ex told me I needed to let my guard down. It looks like she let you down herself. 1.1582 0.03073 196 170 21 5
7416 My profile said I was looking for a knight in shining armor, but I'm feeling a little Bordeaux. 1.1579 0.03144 171 147 21 3
7417 Do you like the wine? It's steel aged. 1.1579 0.02917 171 145 25 1
7418 Trust me, not only is the omelet fresh. The portion size is outrageous. 1.1579 0.03252 171 148 19 4
7419 i had a bad day, but this knight looks worse 1.1579 0.03134 190 165 20 5
7420 I'm sorry, but I only date Teutonic Knights. 1.1579 0.03506 152 132 16 4
7421 Chivalry, outdated? Where I'm from, it was invented just last week. 1.1579 0.02855 190 162 26 2
7422 When I said chivalry & protection were a plus, the emphasis was less chastity belt & more a safe bedside manner, as it were. 1.1576 0.03324 165 143 18 4
7423 The program has an iron clad guarantee.It says I won't gain weight.If. I do,I get a refund 1.1576 0.03324 165 143 18 4
7424 I’m afraid to say “cheers.” 1.1576 0.03094 165 141 22 2
7425 Thanks for keeping my request on Night Date site for a round table. 1.1575 0.03462 146 126 17 3
7426 This is the final coup de theatre scene, a dream truly realized. 1.1574 0.02884 197 169 25 3
7427 I do wish yuo’d Take that thing off. 1.1572 0.03402 159 138 17 4
7428 Don't you DARE ask for a straw. That would be so uncouth! 1.1572 0.03283 159 137 19 3
7429 The academic discipline, Florian! Not the dinner theatre. 1.1572 0.03283 159 137 19 3
7430 For Christ, Brett — no one cares that it’s not beer! 1.1572 0.03402 159 138 17 4
7431 Are you protected enough with its armour from cyber attack? 1.1572 0.03030 159 135 23 1
7432 you requested a knight in shining armor and I'm you date 1.1570 0.03234 172 149 19 4
7433 You've been watching too many Robocop movies 1.1570 0.03127 172 148 21 3
7434 Now really, Mike, next time just bring your chaperone. 1.1570 0.03337 172 150 17 5
7435 I've used dating services before, but girls would never answer my carrier pigeons so I decided to try Tinder. 1.1570 0.03016 172 147 23 2
7436 I’m trying out this first date attire before I meet Bob for dinner tomorrow – it’s Me Too approved. 1.1570 0.03234 172 149 19 4
7437 Why did you only ask for one straw? 1.1568 0.03088 185 160 21 4
7438 Don't you think you are taking the #Me To Movement a bit too far? 1.1564 0.03049 179 154 22 3
7439 This chardonnay isn't oaky! 1.1564 0.03049 179 154 22 3
7440 Bill's online dating proved to be a very literal description of himself 1.1564 0.02763 211 181 27 3
7441 would you rather have oil for that squeak? 1.1562 0.03141 160 137 21 2
7442 Margaret, simple Spanx and a blow-out would have been enough. 1.1561 0.03110 173 149 21 3
7443 No worries, they say drinking with a straw helps you get drunk faster! 1.1561 0.03217 173 150 19 4
7444 What attracts you? My armour or my armor? 1.1560 0.03669 141 123 14 4
7445 It's not me, it's you. You're not shiny enough 1.1558 0.03584 154 135 14 5
7446 Well, it's about time you showed up.That armor isn't so shiny anymore 1.1557 0.03060 167 143 22 2
7447 Arthur, your shining armor does not speak well for you in this dim bistro. 1.1557 0.03175 167 144 20 3
7448 No, Jim, "#MeToo" does NOT actually mean "my turn." 1.1556 0.02929 180 154 24 2
7449 WASP dates Ironman - not again. 1.1556 0.03231 180 157 18 5
7450 Then he said “Will the Honorable Ruth Ginsburg please stand up.” 1.1556 0.03326 180 158 16 6
7451 Apparently my armor doesn't shine. 1.1554 0.02908 193 166 24 3
7452 You want me to pay for dinner!? 1.1553 0.03123 161 138 21 2
7453 Funny, I sent my kid to school in the same thing. 1.1553 0.02863 161 136 25 0
7454 You are my knight in shining armor.! 1.1552 0.03094 174 150 21 3
7455 Back then we marched, protested, we didn’t burn bras—that’s a myth. Dear, I’m never getting grandchildren, am I? 1.1548 0.03442 155 135 16 4
7456 Lisa slowly began to realize the suit of armor was as hollow as the honor of the online dating service she 1.1548 0.03269 168 146 18 4
7457 The Knight of The Round Table takes a break 1.1547 0.02807 181 154 26 1
7458 Yeah, I have definite relationship boundaries . . . "en garde." 1.1544 0.03119 149 127 21 1
7459 ...and after this, we'll be riding off into the sunset. 1.1544 0.03528 149 130 15 4
7460 Are you trying to tell me Me Too? 1.1543 0.03226 162 140 19 3
7461 Look me in the eye and tell me you love me! 1.1543 0.02847 162 137 25 0
7462 How do you keep your outfit so shiny? 1.1543 0.03077 175 151 21 3
7463 Sorry, Sir Perceval, you’re just not what I’ve been looking for all my life. 1.1538 0.02682 182 154 28 0
7464 They say the wine will take away that heavy feeling you've been complaining about. 1.1538 0.03026 169 145 22 2
7465 I swear it's fake news; I'm only called Lancelot! 1.1538 0.03140 169 146 20 3
7466 Every woman dreams of a knight in shining armor, but this date on a rainy night isn’t working for me. I’ll order WD-40 to go. 1.1534 0.03207 163 141 19 3
7467 I’m not in the mood. 1.1529 0.03152 157 135 20 2
7468 I should of ordered takeout 1.1525 0.03149 177 154 19 4
7469 Do you think they sell mead here, I can’t drink like a king 1.1522 0.02972 184 159 22 3
7470 No, what I'd said was - I've been waiting for a mighty sign-in honor. 1.1522 0.03070 184 160 20 4
7471 Didn't get the knights and princess dressing up memo? 1.1520 0.02876 171 146 24 1
7472 My guarded opinion is that it is a 4 out of 10 1.1519 0.03002 158 135 22 1
7473 I’m sorry. You seem like a nice person but your armor isn’t shining. 1.1515 0.03396 165 145 15 5
7474 Any way you can get that to shine a little? 1.1514 0.02856 185 159 24 2
7475 You'll need more than that getup to make it through this dinner. 1.1514 0.02957 185 160 22 3
7476 I said I had gone to Rhea. 1.1513 0.03334 152 132 17 3
7477 When I swapped right I thought you meant a U.S Soldier. 1.1512 0.02977 172 148 22 2
7478 Well, you never know when a horse might gallop through here with a jouster aiming his lance right down my schnozzle. 1.1512 0.03089 172 149 20 3
7479 The least he could have done was draw me a full glass of wine... 1.1510 0.02794 192 165 25 2
7480 Well they said to go down third and then left, but I didn’t realize they meant the cafe. 1.1509 0.03240 159 138 18 3
7481 I guess it's just lucky that I didn't call you my ace in the hole. 1.1508 0.03116 179 156 19 4
7482 This si my new dieting strategy. 1.1507 0.03415 146 127 16 3
7483 Pick one: Politics or Politics? 1.1505 0.02942 186 161 22 3
7484 Alice in France. 1.1503 0.03182 153 132 19 2
7485 Honey, this doesn't make you my knight in shining armor" 1.1503 0.02780 193 166 25 2
7486 I told you, I'm not Sir Lancelot. My name is Sayer Lanslots. 1.1500 0.03097 160 138 20 2
7487 So... have I mentioned I can be your knight in shining armour? 1.1500 0.03341 160 140 16 4
7488 You never know when they're going to bring out the sharp cheese. 1.1500 0.03221 160 139 18 3
7489 Oh, no, it’s only for self-restraint. For identity protection I have beer from a vine glass. 1.1497 0.02927 187 162 22 3
7490 I didn't know the DateNight service had a time machine. 1.1497 0.03018 167 144 21 2
7491 I wish he were taller... 1.1497 0.03018 167 144 21 2
7492 It's a clever disguise for Salisbury. Want a straw? 1.1497 0.03018 167 144 21 2
7493 My profile said I was active in AARP, not LARP. 1.1497 0.03018 167 144 21 2
7494 Hey, it's the age of #MeToo and #TimesUp. If I want to be safe, I have to get medieval on my own ass. 1.1497 0.03783 147 131 10 6
7495 I will not talk to the armor, Raymond--Get out of the table" 1.1494 0.02945 174 150 22 2
7496 No, Patrick, that's not what I meant when you asked If I liked 'Game of Thrones and chill' " 1.1494 0.02830 174 149 24 1
7497 One moment while I remove my earbuds 1.1494 0.02945 174 150 22 2
7498 You said you wanted to have a heart to heart. 1.1494 0.03420 154 135 15 4
7499 Did you mistakenly use Armorall as a full body moisturizer? 1.1494 0.03420 154 135 15 4
7500 I'm looking for a damsel in distress with my new VR gear. 1.1494 0.03025 154 132 21 1
7501 Possibly your male friends think you need protection. This is not what they mean 1.1488 0.03339 168 148 15 5
7502 The Untouchables first date. 1.1488 0.02881 168 144 23 1
7503 Some say, I'm way too dating relationship damaged and freakishly on my guard. That gonna be an eHarmony problem here? 1.1488 0.03002 168 145 21 2
7504 jousting season is coming up actually - excellent time to be operating a horseshare app 1.1487 0.02939 195 170 21 4
7505 The service here is sort of slow, but their food is worth it. Well, not all food. Don't get anything vegetarian, they put way too much spice in it. Once the risotto was stale, so maybe not that either. Stick with the steak. So how was mom's funeral? 1.1486 0.03371 148 129 16 3
7506 Honest, I know it's a first date but I really won't bite! 1.1486 0.03505 148 130 14 4
7507 Blind Date indeed! If there's a man in their it is I that needs the armor! 1.1486 0.03371 148 129 16 3
7508 If I marry you, do I get to wear an armor suit too? 1.1486 0.02930 175 151 22 2
7509 I understand it's the latest in burqa styles, but it's your wine that threw me off. 1.1484 0.03143 155 134 19 2
7510 Why is this such a beautiful Night?​ 1.1484 0.02755 182 156 25 1
7511 Well, I wouldn't call this a great night spot. 1.1481 0.03184 162 141 18 3
7512 Ok. I'll call it one night with a night 1.1481 0.02933 162 139 22 1
7513 I’ve been waiting for the silver lining of online dating 1.1479 0.02985 169 146 21 2
7514 I didn't expect this with aged wine. 1.1477 0.02914 176 152 22 2
7515 Oh, you’re just an old tinhorn wine drinker. 1.1474 0.02989 156 134 21 1
7516 Are you sure that germs cannot penetrate your mask? 1.1471 0.03084 170 148 19 3
7517 I conquered the dragon lady from my childhood, only to be dating her." 1.1469 0.03008 177 154 20 3
7518 Roundtables permitting, I'm a huge advocate for space exploration. 1.1469 0.02668 177 151 26 0
7519 Rest assure. I won't be able to assault you. 1.1467 0.03329 150 131 16 3
7520 Guess you had a heavy day! 1.1465 0.03235 157 137 17 3
7521 So when you said on your profile that you were a Trojan, I didn't think...... 1.1465 0.03478 157 139 13 5
7522 Knight and Hawk 1.1465 0.02619 198 170 27 1
7523 I agree that should dress for success. It’s just that your dream of being knighted by the Queen seems a little far-fetched. 1.1463 0.03027 164 142 20 2
7524 She wasn't convinced he was her knight in shining armor. 1.1462 0.02953 171 148 21 2
7525 I wanted a night in Santa Monica's RESTAURANTE! 1.1461 0.03096 178 156 18 4
7526 Drink that, varlet! 1.1461 0.02884 178 154 22 2
7527 Mais oui, I might have said "let's spend together the night" 1.1461 0.02884 178 154 22 2
7528 You could say there's a suit of armour in my kink. 1.1459 0.03116 185 163 17 5
7529 I told the service I was searching for a knight, but this is ridiculous. 1.1459 0.02819 185 160 23 2
7530 Was Jane Mayer too deeply penetrating? 1.1457 0.03030 151 130 20 1
7531 ♫ Tonight, tonight, won't be just any knight ♪ - or - Shall I ask the maitre d' to bring a straw? - or - So, what do you do for a living? 1.1457 0.03309 151 132 16 3
7532 Don't worry, this will disappear once you get to know me better. 1.1456 0.03088 158 137 19 2
7533 Of course you're a feminist! Isn't everybody? 1.1453 0.02937 172 149 21 2
7534 I guess I should've expected this when I mentioned having a (k)night out. 1.1453 0.03266 172 152 15 5
7535 Gosh, that's an odd way of saying 'Good Night' 1.1453 0.03160 172 151 17 4
7536 Is that real? 1.1452 0.02805 186 161 23 2
7537 It's not you - it's me. I just don't see myself sallying-forth with someone who's got vertical stripes. 1.1446 0.02993 166 144 20 2
7538 I'm just sayin', it's not that I drink that much, but wine is a known antioxidant. 1.1444 0.02791 187 162 23 2
7539 You still don't like a wine with a metallic aftertaste? 1.1438 0.03134 153 133 18 2
7540 Usually, my knight in shining armor takes it off before our blind date. 1.1437 0.03095 167 146 18 3
7541 I'm wearing my Me -Too chastity belt 1.1437 0.03530 167 150 10 7
7542 That tin suit is no protection... I can still grab your neck! 1.1437 0.03017 174 152 19 3
7543 I thought you said you wanted an armoured knight" 1.1437 0.03017 174 152 19 3
7544 I hate to criticize, O Shining One, but your kisses hurt even more than Cupid's arrows. 1.1429 0.03034 161 140 19 2
7545 I like its notes of butterscotch and grass. -- suitable for a joust! 1.1429 0.03001 175 153 19 3
7546 I don't think this is a special knight. 1.1429 0.03115 154 134 18 2
7547 I felt the same way after I filed my income tax return. 1.1429 0.03109 175 154 17 4
7548 I didn't think this is what they meant when they said it would be a blind taste test! Peter J. Kahn, Bethesda, MD 1.1429 0.02864 189 165 21 3
7549 Sorry, it's not shiny enough to even consider a second date, let alone a lifetime." 1.1429 0.03034 161 140 19 2
7550 First comes the smell test. Then we drain the swamp. 1.1420 0.02759 176 152 23 1
7551 My fashion statements never go beyond the horse and buggy days. 1.1420 0.02874 176 153 21 2
7552 Do I have your permission to declare war on this light, ma'am? ​B.T.W my metal is from ancient times. 1.1420 0.03060 169 148 18 3
7553 Why did you insist on the round table?" "Because I have crippling depression. 1.1420 0.02751 162 139 23 0
7554 Let's call it a night. I feel a distress headache coming on. 1.1420 0.03141 162 142 17 3
7555 Knight in shining armor, at your service. 1.1419 0.03034 148 128 19 1
7556 Yes, I asked for a "knight in shining armor." No, there will be no dubbing tonight. 1.1412 0.02678 170 146 24 0
7557 Yes, I really should remodel the basement so the wine cellar is this side of the dragon's lair. 1.1411 0.03123 163 143 17 3
7558 Hmmmm. 1.1411 0.02999 163 142 19 2
7559 Can't you see? This is me, breaking out of my comfort zone. 1.1411 0.03468 163 146 11 6
7560 Tinwoman, at last! 1.1411 0.03242 163 144 15 4
7561 Mother-in-law takes me out to discuss “Family Values and the #MeToo Movement” over a glass over Sangria. 1.1410 0.03077 156 136 18 2
7562 More like Tannin Lafite, am I right? 1.1407 0.02762 199 174 22 3
7563 Like my online dating profile said Knight in Shining Armor Frank Buckley Andover, MA 1.1405 0.03083 185 164 16 5
7564 You can take of your helmet, Lindsay. They locked to door. 1.1404 0.03260 178 159 13 6
7565 I am just warming up for safe sex later on. Wine affects me that way. 1.1404 0.02911 171 149 20 2
7566 If I may ask,who's drinking who under the table? 1.1404 0.02911 171 149 20 2
7567 I agree the best vintage of the tasting is the 1216. 1.1404 0.02664 171 147 24 0
7568 Don't panic, the tomatoes here aren't poisonous. 1.1401 0.02779 157 135 22 0
7569 It all went smoothly between them until he found out that a visor is not a sipper. 1.1400 0.03142 150 131 17 2
7570 (knight) - I have been fighting and protecting for fortnight. (woman) - Protecting? My son has been addicted to that game for 2 weeks now! 1.1398 0.02871 186 163 20 3
7571 Not this. I meant the other kind. 1.1398 0.02871 186 163 20 3
7572 Thomas, What are you doing wearing my lying, stinky, dirty, old, white-mans Halloween costume !” I earned it 1.1397 0.03145 179 159 15 5
7573 Don't worry the lobsters are given some wine before serving. 1.1395 0.03121 172 152 16 4
7574 This wasn’t really her idea of a night out. 1.1395 0.03010 172 151 18 3
7575 Look, it’s the Me Too movement. You don’t comment on my beaver, and I won’t comment on yours. 1.1393 0.02548 201 174 26 1
7576 In restaurants, it's more than just eccentric, but in bed, it's flat out nuts! The tin suit's gotta go, or we're history! 1.1392 0.03295 158 140 14 4
7577 Yes he said it was a hard time 'out there' for young men, but maybe you've gone a bit too far, no? 1.1392 0.02795 194 170 21 3
7578 The suit won’t help if you’re blotto 1.1391 0.03122 151 132 17 2
7579 You really need to shine your armor more. 1.1389 0.02815 180 157 21 2
7580 OH, so you're a Libra. I myself am a Leo personally. 1.1389 0.03055 144 125 18 1
7581 I feel more comfortable viewing the world from behind my amor 1.1389 0.02815 180 157 21 2
7582 My parents named me Robert but my friends call me “Bobby the Knight.” 1.1387 0.02636 173 149 24 0
7583 I only like night "knight" dates. 1.1386 0.02822 166 144 21 1
7584 It's true that age is just a state of mind. I just wish my mind wasn't stuck in the medieval age. 1.1386 0.02822 166 144 21 1
7585 I go for the shy-type in men. 1.1384 0.02747 159 137 22 0
7586 I like how it gives my wine an after-taste 1.1384 0.02888 159 138 20 1
7587 You never listen to me. I told you to get it shined by this weekend 1.1382 0.03372 152 135 13 4
7588 This wasn't what I imagined when his restaurant advertised a night of wine. 1.1379 0.02864 174 152 20 2
7589 You said you wanted to eat at a round table! And, yes, I have an oil can with me! And, no, your ex-wife won't recognize you! I'd say chivalry is dead! 1.1379 0.02864 174 152 20 2
7590 It's not red, and I don't be 40. 1.1379 0.02711 203 178 22 3
7591 Your code of chivalry sounds sexy. 1.1379 0.03036 145 126 18 1
7592 My passion? My daughter introduced me to Dark Souls, and it changed my life. 1.1379 0.03190 145 127 16 2
7593 You're fetish wear is a tad bit too modest. 1.1379 0.03190 145 127 16 2
7594 Did you request this particular table? 1.1378 0.02572 196 170 25 1
7595 Knights in shining armor aren't known for small talk, so drincan and let's catch a trusty steed to my place. 1.1374 0.02893 182 160 19 3
7596 'My Knight in Shining Armor has always been Lee Harvey Oswald...' 1.1374 0.02559 182 157 25 0
7597 I need to see your face. How else can I evalualte you? ? 1.1371 0.02849 175 153 20 2
7598 You are not my knight in shining armor! 1.1371 0.02849 175 153 20 2
7599 So this is what you meant by "I'ma get medieval on your ass?" 1.1369 0.03262 168 150 13 5
7600 I recently pledged fealty to the president. Don't break up with me. 1.1369 0.03151 168 149 15 4
7601 Did you think I said, "Cab or neigh?" 1.1366 0.03115 161 142 16 3
7602 What is your Inner Child scared of? 1.1364 0.02833 176 154 20 2
7603 Yeah, I don't believe her testimony! What's you gonna do about it? 1.1364 0.03693 154 140 7 7
7604 I’m on my second drink. You don’t like the wine? 1.1364 0.03201 154 136 15 3
7605 You might try these because we've eliminated 'sexual assault' cases significantly. 1.1353 0.02884 170 149 19 2
7606 I was hoping your armor would be really, really shiny! 1.1351 0.02520 185 160 25 0
7607 This “Knight in Shining Armour” routine of yours is seriously getting in the road of good sex. 1.1350 0.02953 163 143 18 2
7608 this was not exactly what Faith had in mind when she agree to a night out 1.1350 0.03079 163 144 16 3
7609 It's not what I expected for date night. 1.1350 0.02953 163 143 18 2
7610 Is Mr. Right a knight in shining armor? 1.1348 0.02886 141 122 19 0
7611 Me trying to explain to my teacher the bell does dismiss us. 1.1346 0.02888 156 136 19 1
7612 I’m sorry, but I can’t date a man whose pony is bthan Ariana Grande’s. 1.1346 0.03162 156 138 15 3
7613 ...and now it's far more difficult to watch the kids... 1.1345 0.02745 171 149 21 1
7614 It was YOUR idea to meet up to knight. 1.1345 0.02985 171 151 17 3
7615 So I guess you weren’t talking about the basketball team. 1.1342 0.03252 149 132 14 3
7616 I forgot. How fast does an African swallow fly? 1.1338 0.02871 157 137 19 1
7617 He said I was a militant feminist. 1.1337 0.02969 172 152 17 3
7618 Knight in shining armor; where is the white horse then 1.1337 0.02495 187 162 25 0
7619 '' i promise to show you my face tonight"" 1.1333 0.03090 150 132 16 2
7620 No, it's the first time I've used the ArmRR app. 1.1333 0.03044 165 146 16 3
7621 Don't look at me like that! I may not be your white knight but I am your knight in Sauvignon Blanc. 1.1333 0.02774 180 158 20 2
7622 Why are you wearing a full suit of armor? I mean, you're an adult and can make these decisions but it's weird to be dressed as a knight in public at this restaurant, and on our first date no less. 1.1333 0.03021 195 175 14 6
7623 Nice... but it could be a little more shiny. 1.1333 0.02654 165 143 22 0
7624 You didn't change any bit since 17 years ago while starring in A Knight Tale, did you? 1.1329 0.02716 173 151 21 1
7625 Thanks for helping me with that difficult situation, ma'am. 1.1329 0.03064 173 154 15 4
7626 My lady. Your dating vignette indicated your fondness for the angelic sounds of minstrels. Tell me, do you fancy the one they call Sir-Mix-A-Lot? 1.1326 0.02869 181 160 18 3
7627 #MeWoo 1.1325 0.02903 166 146 18 2
7628 What, you said you were into? 1.1317 0.02887 167 147 18 2
7629 A date at night, with a knight. 1.1316 0.02876 190 169 17 4
7630 You're welcome, but I'm programmed to swipe right. 1.1313 0.02678 160 139 21 0
7631 I thought I was having a date night. 1.1311 0.02732 183 161 20 2
7632 Ahhh ...I see now that I still haven't met my match ---- I thought your headline said "whining" armor, not "shining" armor. 1.1311 0.02732 183 161 20 2
7633 Mayor Jones found her knight in shining armor over a glass of wine Saturday night. 1.1310 0.02871 168 148 18 2
7634 I can visualize a better cleavage in my mind this way. 1.1304 0.02662 161 140 21 0
7635 Well this is quite appropriate that we drink a red with impressive pedigree... 1.1302 0.02596 169 147 22 0
7636 Sorry, the guy who shines my armor was sick this week 1.1298 0.03494 131 117 11 3
7637 I thought you were a white knight. 1.1296 0.02788 162 142 19 1
7638 Didn't King Arthur tell you that everyone's equal around the round table? 1.1294 0.02713 170 149 20 1
7639 You know when I said we should get to know each other this isn't what I meant 1.1292 0.02874 178 158 17 3
7640 What? You said 'red'. 1.1292 0.02762 178 157 19 2
7641 This way, people on Twitter can't say it was my fault. 1.1290 0.02996 155 137 16 2
7642 So when you advertised “seeking my knight in shining armor,” I wasn’t sure how you’d feel about my gender reassignment campaign! 1.1288 0.02906 163 144 17 2
7643 I asked my last date if he had any chinks in his armor, and it sounded like 'racist pig', as he stormed out. 1.1286 0.03015 140 123 16 1
7644 You were my knight in shining armor until you tarnished your armor with that wine. Next time, lift your visor. 1.1285 0.02859 179 159 17 3
7645 I thought my date would be shinier...and I even have to drink his cheap wine! 1.1285 0.02747 179 158 19 2
7646 Yeah I love the shiny bit. Bit you really can't take it off in bed? 1.1282 0.02685 156 136 20 0
7647 Ever seen Mrs. Doubtfire? Yeah, it’s that kind of a situation. 1.1280 0.02617 164 143 21 0
7648 Sorry - no - that's my uncle. I'm the one in WINING armor. 1.1280 0.02756 164 144 19 1
7649 So sorry--all I have is red wine. 1.1279 0.02926 172 153 16 3
7650 Look at me like I'm the first ever catfish. 1.1276 0.02793 196 175 17 4
7651 Is this to be a toast to a joust? 1.1275 0.03200 149 133 13 3
7652 Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you were muslim, so I thought I'd make you feel comfortable by wearing a comperative Aryan tradition of ours of covering up ourselves so nobody can see us. 1.1274 0.03224 157 141 12 4
7653 Is this a freak in or a freak out? 1.1271 0.02718 181 160 19 2
7654 Is this allowed? Wtf? Is this allowed?! 1.1270 0.02542 189 166 22 1
7655 Might I suggest you not order it rare. 1.1267 0.02884 150 132 17 1
7656 World travel ain't what it used to be. 1.1266 0.02654 158 138 20 0
7657 Haters gonna hate...INCOME INEQUALITY!!!! 1.1265 0.02725 166 146 19 1
7658 For a night owl, early closings are a pain. 1.1265 0.02725 166 146 19 1
7659 Sir Render”? Lady Capitate. Buzz off 1.1265 0.02588 166 145 21 0
7660 It's a common cold--and a straw please 1.1264 0.02894 174 155 16 3
7661 Drink a small much as you want, I’ll ride you home. 1.1264 0.02920 182 163 15 4
7662 Actually, "wax on, wax off" is not really my thing. 1.1258 0.02866 151 133 17 1
7663 I don't get why everyone always wants a cramped little booth 1.1258 0.03159 151 135 13 3
7664 What? A night with wine and armor isn't good enough? 1.1258 0.02785 159 140 18 1
7665 I still think a Liebfrau Milch overlooking the moat would be better than a Caberknight Sauvignon at the Round Table. 1.1257 0.02710 167 147 19 1
7666 For heaven’s sake, it’s hard enough for knights in shining armor to to candlelight dinners. You can just forget about the 1.1257 0.02800 183 163 17 3
7667 So, before we begin this interview on the recovery of the rust-belt, are you sure you don't need a straw? 1.1250 0.03082 176 159 12 5
7668 The ticks can bring it. 1.1250 0.02695 168 148 19 1
7669 80 year old Judy travels back in time to have one last dinner with her knight and shining armor. 1.1250 0.03066 168 151 13 4
7670 I’ve never been on a blind date like the before. 1.1250 0.02747 176 156 18 2
7671 Come On, Try It, Have a Zip 1.1250 0.02907 160 142 16 2
7672 Please don't wine on this knight. 1.1243 0.02808 169 150 17 2
7673 Wining to my Knight in Shining Armor 1.1242 0.02608 161 141 20 0
7674 But can't you see, I really am your knight in shining armor. 1.1236 0.02599 178 157 20 1
7675 Let’s both stop ‘wining’, the “Me Too” movement has us Gallant Knights feeling quite vulnerable too. 1.1235 0.02531 170 149 21 0
7676 I only drink red wine at (k)night" 1.1235 0.02665 170 150 19 1
7677 aren't you a bit withholding? 1.1234 0.02814 154 136 17 1
7678 Brett, planning to celebrate with your Delta brothers? 1.1230 0.03041 187 170 11 6
7679 The Knight of the date. 1.1227 0.02856 163 145 16 2
7680 LIMERICK ADVICE TO EMMA AND COLIN:The new New Yorker consumer...The young hip millennial bloomer...Don't think of a limerick...As some kind of gimmick...But more as an artisan humor. 1.1227 0.02856 163 145 16 2
7681 I eat a Mediterranean diet as well! 1.1220 0.02563 164 144 20 0
7682 When your attempt to conceal your body language backfires and only serves to increase your magnetism. 1.1212 0.02824 165 147 16 2
7683 I've developed scar tissue, too. I just try to hide it. 1.1212 0.02824 165 147 16 2
7684 I"m sorry to keep bringing it up, but I just don't think a valet is a suitable substitute for a man-at-arms. 1.1210 0.02907 157 140 15 2
7685 Shall I order you some foie gras? 1.1203 0.02890 158 141 15 2
7686 You see a knight, but I see domestic violence being forestalled. 1.1203 0.02890 158 141 15 2
7687 This date is going to get a bad review on YELP 1.1200 0.02464 175 154 21 0
7688 I asked for a knight in shining armor but where is our dinner..and can you please take off the mask? I need a man that will look me in the eye! 1.1200 0.02825 150 133 16 1
7689 Sorry, but my profile said I was night in a shining armor” 1.1200 0.02717 175 156 17 2
7690 Don’t you need a straw to drink this wine? Or else get out of these soldier uniform. Otherwise you can’t tell what you are drinking. 1.1196 0.02519 184 163 20 1
7691 I used to just put on a fedora for classy places, but everyone online kept calling me a 'white knight.' 1.1195 0.02730 159 141 17 1
7692 The Liszt? I thought you said we were going to the lists. 1.1190 0.02776 168 150 16 2
7693 You call this speed dating 1.1186 0.02688 177 158 17 2
7694 So this is what you meant when you said you 1.1186 0.02566 177 157 19 1
7695 Why do you always have to be so dramatic Janet ? I only forgot to flush once ! 1.1186 0.02649 194 174 17 3
7696 You're twenty minutes late and two weeks early. 1.1183 0.02760 169 151 16 2
7697 You're probably wondering how I'm going to drink this here mead. Forsooth! If Lancelot could do it, should I not, too? Hear, hear. Get me a straw! 1.1183 0.02885 169 152 14 3
7698 Any interesting aperitifs in your times? 1.1183 0.02822 186 168 14 4
7699 (Well, he’s well defended) 1.1180 0.02552 178 158 19 1
7700 I wish you would have shined your armor. 1.1173 0.02822 162 145 15 2
7701 Knight: "Time flies, dors it not?" 1.1173 0.02955 162 146 13 3
7702 I guess I need to start digging a little deeper with this '"just lunch" dating service. 1.1167 0.02646 180 161 17 2
7703 I’m defensive. I’m not wearing lipstick or glasses to shield me. 1.1163 0.02451 172 152 20 0
7704 You are aware that straws need to be requested and then I will frown even more at you 1.1161 0.02739 155 138 16 1
7705 He's on the Court and he's married. Keep him away from beer and you'll be fine. 1.1159 0.02920 164 148 13 3
7706 You're in a suit of armor. 1.1159 0.02789 164 147 15 2
7707 And the Knight said,"just take it off for a little while". 1.1159 0.02789 164 147 15 2
7708 I don't really mind eating with a man with armor,but can you take that off? 1.1159 0.03046 164 149 11 4
7709 So, you finally turned bearish. 1.1159 0.02652 164 146 17 1
7710 I don't want to be a Me Too. 1.1152 0.02432 191 170 20 1
7711 Too much? What you wear to play hostess to a Republican victory party?! 1.1149 0.02558 174 155 18 1
7712 I was expecting someone with some shine. 1.1149 0.02685 174 156 16 2
7713 Call me again after you've used some white wine vinegar on the armor rust, Sir Knight. 1.1148 0.02486 183 163 19 1
7714 Too many places serve dainty tapas-style menus, so I started bringing my own heavy plate just in case. 1.1146 0.02853 157 141 14 2
7715 I misunderstood Gwynnie’s warning that their ancient stuffy “suit required” rule was only for night dining. 1.1146 0.02706 157 140 16 1
7716 On Match Online I suggested we start slow 1.1146 0.02706 157 140 16 1
7717 Did you bring the Vegan Starter Kit? 1.1143 0.02412 175 155 20 0
7718 Maybe you could get some big wine company to spounser your Jousting.” 1.1139 0.02690 158 141 16 1
7719 I'm on a liquid diet, too. It's what we gives me my drop dead looks. 1.1133 0.02597 150 133 17 0
7720 I mean, sure, I like fighting dragons as much as the next guy, but I really became a knight for the snap. 1.1132 0.02674 159 142 16 1
7721 You see, my dear, I was told the overhead lighting in this restaurant is sometimes explosive! 1.1131 0.02726 168 151 15 2
7722 ++I think you could be a bit more subtle before you hit the bank. 1.1131 0.02854 168 152 13 3
7723 May your spirits always rise in knightly fashion. 1.1127 0.02844 142 127 14 1
7724 Bottom sup! 1.1124 0.02504 178 159 18 1
7725 So, who asked you up here for a blind date? Your pal, Bert? I somehow get the feeling he mentioned the sledgehammer I always keep in my evening bag. 1.1117 0.02614 179 161 16 2
7726 Sticks and stones can’t break My bones, but watch 1.1105 0.02513 190 171 17 2
7727 Jenny set me up with a real beast last time - she didn’t even like red wine 1.1105 0.02790 172 156 13 3
7728 Your my knight in shining armor but where is your house? 1.1098 0.02737 164 148 14 2
7729 the white's a bit steely, don't you think? 1.1097 0.03113 155 142 9 4
7730 Don't look at me like that. No, you don't look at me like that. No, you don't look at Me like that. .... 1.1092 0.02637 174 157 15 2
7731 Chivalry may not be dead, but it is certainly retro, in a pre-post-modern, paternalistic sort of way... Or did you say, "Hillary?" 1.1090 0.02814 156 141 13 2
7732 I thought tonight I would finally meet someone who shines armor. 1.1086 0.02358 175 156 19 0
7733 I’ll You don 1.1084 0.02421 166 148 18 0
7734 You got your knight in shining armor, so stop complaining about the emell! If i showered, I would turn the color of this wine. 1.1083 0.02488 157 140 17 0
7735 - I'm ready. How fast you may undressed? 1.1083 0.02797 157 142 13 2
7736 I've picked up wine sniffing as a hobby in the last few centuries- this helmet has been stuck on my head since 1580. 1.1081 0.02414 185 166 18 1
7737 If I don't get some anal sex soon I'll just die. 1.1080 0.02846 176 161 11 4
7738 Bon Apetit to Our Hidden Apertif: "As they say grace, a windcheater shall remove the Cheat's Last Trace"... 1.1076 0.02631 158 142 15 1
7739 I am your knight in shining armor, coming to your emotional rescue. 1.1071 0.02393 168 150 18 0
7740 I'm not impressed by your suit with shinning nitre. 1.1069 0.02904 159 145 11 3
7741 If you d154-b6b1-4d57-ae55-1b4b6649ac7e%22%2C%22session_count%22:2%2C%22last_session_ts%22:1539451512960} 1.1067 0.02815 178 163 11 4
7742 I know I texted you about the knight on the first date but it's not even Halloween yet 1.1065 0.02380 169 151 18 0
7743 Man went too far when his date asked him to bring good wine. He only focused on the "aged" part. 1.1050 0.02539 181 164 15 2
7744 You're right, you won't be on any suspect list - the FBI instructions excluded investigating knights in shining armor. 1.1039 0.02790 154 140 12 2
7745 A suit of armor dos not hid your ftid soul Amy Sorkin. 1.1039 0.02938 154 141 10 3
7746 Not sure our waiter appreciated your allusion to the Red Knight from the "Fisher King". 1.1037 0.02683 164 149 13 2
7747 You were explaining this challenge you face to find intimacy with a certain cockroach... 1.1034 0.02891 145 132 11 2
7748 You know, when I saw you on the dating site, you were one ugly dude but after this fourth glass of top shelf red, you're lookin' good, dude! 1.1032 0.02617 155 140 14 1
7749 Are you Richard Colton who created " I love New York' and is trying to reach an editor at The New Yorker to tell the true story to? 1.1030 0.02525 165 149 15 1
7750 Mine doesn't have hints of metal and a long 1.1030 0.02374 165 148 17 0
7751 Actually no sword, just straws. 1.1030 0.02525 165 149 15 1
7752 The straw van isn’t going well for me. 1.1030 0.02525 165 149 15 1
7753 WITH FACE COVERED HOW WILL YOU DRINK WINE? 1.1027 0.02487 185 168 15 2
7754 This is perfect there is no wait 1.1023 0.02558 176 160 14 2
7755 I love your new hair colour. 1.1017 0.02278 177 159 18 0
7756 Well I usually use a crystal ball 1.1006 0.02554 159 144 14 1
7757 This knight ended up being solid 1.1006 0.02554 159 144 14 1
7758 Well it's Night, and you have shining armour, but, I'm not sure about the "My" part. For all I know, you may have some small night's. 1.1006 0.02468 169 153 15 1
7759 Alcohol turns me on like hellium tuns on the rocket. 1.1000 0.02967 160 148 8 4
7760 But it says in your online profile that your favorite song is 'Knights on Broadway.'" Dennis Kaplan, Avon, C 1.1000 0.02182 190 171 19 0
7761 What? You got something against my grillz? 1.0995 0.02295 191 173 17 1
7762 Listen, I did ask to meet a "Doctor" but you will do. 1.0994 0.02440 171 155 15 1
7763 No one will remember 30 years from now. I will remain unknown and protected by my suit of armor. Plus, doesn’t the wine make it consensual? 1.0994 0.02365 161 145 16 0
7764 Bob, you're sweet, but my was meant to be taken figuratively, not literally. 1.0983 0.02800 173 160 9 4
7765 Love how pendant lighting makes me think of how,um,pending things could be. 1.0982 0.02494 163 148 14 1
7766 I like red wine because it reminds me of my nemesis - The dark knight 1.0966 0.02754 176 163 9 4
7767 I couldn't be more excited. I've never seen Sheckie...in a club! 1.0963 0.02292 187 170 16 1
7768 It's the safest way to avoid accusations" "Uh huh, battle gear. Sure. 1.0957 0.02280 188 171 16 1
7769 Do not touch the glass till you 1.0949 0.02506 158 144 13 1
7770 So drink wine with a knight charges too? 1.0947 0.02410 169 154 14 1
7771 This is the smallest Round Table I've ever "It's the latest in winter wear." 1.0944 0.02323 180 164 15 1
7772 I...I...I'm sorry I forgot to take the chicken out of the freezer before work this morning. 1.0943 0.02792 159 147 9 3
7773 Which planet are you from? Do you have a jetlag? 1.0936 0.02782 171 159 8 4
7774 I hope my glass doesn't get stained! 1.0932 0.02461 161 147 13 1
7775 You'll win the election if you convince them that it's not really armor." 1.0932 0.02298 161 146 15 0
7776 The dating game is getting creatively interesting...errr...but you need to speak up as I cannot hear you clearly... 1.0927 0.02548 151 138 12 1
7777 Did you take my beans tiger, Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeee 1.0920 0.02432 163 149 13 1
7778 Do I dance? sing ? or just look "Stressed " out ? 1.0870 0.02396 161 148 12 1
7779 What am I missing? This is supposed to be a whine tasting! 1.0867 0.02305 150 137 13 0
7780 Do you fuck with the war? 1.0857 0.02272 175 161 13 1
7781 My stomach doesn't know chivalry. May I order a cheese plate? Carrots? A slice of bread, sir? 1.0805 0.02431 149 138 10 1
7782 Sorry, we cannot order two knights' special. Just whine, ironic, huh? 1.0783 0.02259 166 154 11 1
7783 Date knight. The women says,"You disgust me!" The knight says " but whyyyyyyyyyy!!" 1.0777 0.02067 193 179 13 1
7784 What did you expect? I said on the dating site that I liked being called "Sir." I also said that I wasn't a Dom. 1.0769 0.01913 195 180 15 0
7785 If we don't get our food soon, I'm going to drop a house on someone! 1.0753 0.02398 146 136 9 1
7786 Well duh - I'd never have guessed . . . 1.0736 0.02229 163 152 10 1
7787 I know it's not a flattering outfit for a first date, but he is white and very powerful. 1.0724 0.02306 152 142 9 1
7788 Honey, I am too old for you. The drinking age is 21, but you’re 18. Old enough to join the military. 1.0680 0.02672 147 140 4 3
7789 So, how's about I set you on my pacing steed, and nothing else see all day long? 1.0655 0.01914 168 157 11 0
7790 I know this is speed dating, but I still think you’re being presumptive. 1.0621 0.01908 161 151 10 0
7791 I should have known better. This was an awkward moment on the TV Show "Ed" and this is just as awkward. 1.0541 0.02097 148 141 6 1
7792 *a rhythmic, metallic clanging is heard* oh haha the squire? he's definitely not under the table, sucking my dick 1.0485 0.01885 165 158 6 1
7793 At least you were listening, to my knight in shining armor comment. 1.0000 0.00722 139 139 0 0