Contest #619


Cartoon

619

The winning captions

These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.

  1. “At least you didn't get the axe.”
  2. “No, not the sword. The test is to pull out the middle drawer.”
  3. “Arthur, if you can get it out by noon, that'd be great.”


Name Value
Submission deadline 2018-06-10T18:42:00.000Z
Voting started -
Voting ended 2018-06-24T19:07:00.000Z
Finalists announced 2018-06-18T18:42:00.000Z
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued June 25th, 2018
Number of captions 9719
Number of responses 867527
Number of participants -


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 It was a very hostile takeover. 2.0433 0.00980 6029 1622 2524 1883
1 It was a very hostile takeover. 2.0429 0.00841 8348 2290 3410 2648
2 The pen is mightier, but that looks awesome. 2.0233 0.01386 2998 829 1270 899
3 If you can remove it... it means your heart is pure. But you can no longer work in sales. 1.9940 0.01007 6040 1867 2342 1831
4 I think there's been a mistake. I asked management to give him the axe. 1.9766 0.01702 2139 688 813 638
5 I thought 'willing to work knights' was just a typo. 1.9606 0.01224 4215 1416 1549 1250
6 Now we are at the last task of your interview. 1.9516 0.01170 4442 1462 1733 1247
7 Also, if you can pull the stuck page out of the copier you become the rightful Head of Finance. 1.9320 0.01124 4867 1673 1852 1342
8 No, not the sword. The test is to pull out the middle drawer. 1.9057 0.01229 4105 1484 1524 1097
9 You can have Damocles' old desk. 1.8829 0.01487 2810 1057 1025 728
10 The pen is taking it pretty hard. 1.8541 0.01172 4702 1912 1564 1226
11 Legend says only someone with a true heart will be able to remove the sword. Unfortunately, we're a law firm. 1.8368 0.01484 2948 1236 957 755
12 At least you didn't get the axe. 1.8237 0.01024 5735 2318 2110 1307
13 Oh, it slides right out. But it's a real confidence booster for the new CEO. 1.8055 0.01173 4278 1755 1600 923
14 It's definitely the sharpest thing to occupy this desk in years. 1.7998 0.01592 2373 998 852 523
15 I see my wife stopped by. 1.7684 0.01423 3087 1405 992 690
16 I preferred when they used pink slips. 1.7643 0.01154 4171 1766 1622 783
17 Thousands have tried and only one succeeded, but he didn't pass the background check. 1.7373 0.01383 3011 1366 1070 575
18 Legend has it that whoever pulls it out gets a desk with a hole in it. 1.7273 0.01366 3256 1554 1036 666
19 ... and now for the final part of your interview ... 1.7252 0.01104 4432 1974 1702 756
20 This was Arthur’s office 1.7234 0.01339 3134 1434 1133 567
21 No, YOU look under the desk. 1.7167 0.01315 3283 1529 1155 599
22 If you think his letter opener is over the top, you should see his staple remover. 1.7152 0.01644 2124 998 733 393
23 Contrary to conventional wisdom, we find it mightier than the pen. 1.7140 0.01523 2322 1052 882 388
24 the vacancy ad read"must be executive calibre" not Excalibur. 1.7131 0.01402 2998 1437 984 577
25 It must have been left here by the knight shift. 1.7049 0.01288 3504 1687 1164 653
26 Nothing here is set in stone... 1.7033 0.01567 2359 1137 785 437
27 It seems as valid a process as the electoral college. 1.6997 0.01704 2008 977 657 374
28 Yet another challenge for which you will discover your MBA is inadequate. 1.6997 0.01838 1625 763 587 275
29 Well, I guess that explains the round table in the board room. 1.6977 0.04731 258 125 86 47
30 It was a hostile takeover 1.6914 0.01883 1552 740 551 261
31 You’ll be fine, Bill. Just don’t cross your legs. 1.6879 0.03044 628 311 202 115
32 And he put a big-ass round table in the conference room. 1.6795 0.01792 1763 872 584 307
33 At Camelot Industries, we don't believe in a complicated job application process. 1.6727 0.02361 999 495 336 168
34 Well, this explains the new massive round table in the boardroom 1.6690 0.01374 2719 1297 1025 397
35 Call Arthur in maintenance. 1.6677 0.01671 2010 1009 660 341
36 If I can’t pull it out after 3 tries does it lock me out of the system? 1.6662 0.02901 683 348 215 120
37 Don't touch it--if you pull it out, they make you director of Human Resources. 1.6582 0.01312 3180 1599 1069 512
38 Unfortunately, the benefit plan is a myth as well. 1.6227 0.01676 1911 1009 614 288
39 We've installed Excel, Explorer and Excalibur for you. 1.6215 0.01834 1585 836 513 236
40 It really streamlines the interview process 1.6073 0.01914 1416 754 464 198
41 A corded telephone? This workplace is so medieval. 1.5992 0.01782 1699 935 510 254
42 Just one more step to delete your Facebook account. 1.5928 0.02296 1078 615 287 176
43 One last little thing ... and the job is yours. 1.5912 0.01682 1700 898 599 203
44 The shredder is a bit retro I'm afraid, but you don't have to plug it in. 1.5910 0.02865 621 337 201 83
45 I pulled it out, but returned it after the indictments. 1.5908 0.01756 1723 954 520 249
46 He works the knight shift. 1.5895 0.01822 1671 947 463 261
47 Make yourself at home, Arthur. 1.5894 0.02893 565 297 203 65
48 He was the knight manager. 1.5874 0.05102 206 115 61 30
49 We've simplified our new CEO search criteria. 1.5830 0.01754 1525 808 545 172
50 Don't try it. There's a substantial penalty for early withdrawal. 1.5797 0.02313 1004 569 288 147
51 We affectionately call it Deskalibur. 1.5795 0.01859 1472 814 463 195
52 When he asks you to try, just pretend like you can't get it out. 1.5683 0.01970 1251 690 411 150
53 Uh oh, Lance -- the boss knows about you and Guinevere... 1.5634 0.02194 1081 620 313 148
54 Go on, Arthur, let’s find out if you’re the guy we’re looking for 1.5624 0.02104 1145 650 346 149
55 This is the last stage of the interview, Arthur. I've got a good feeling about you. 1.5560 0.02263 1054 622 278 154
56 We've been hacked. 1.5541 0.02993 610 363 156 91
57 It’s easier than going through all those resumes. 1.5481 0.02292 925 528 287 110
58 You should see his pen. 1.5455 0.02407 913 543 242 128
59 If you can pull it out the office is yours. Plus a horse. 1.5443 0.02364 891 517 263 111
60 No one knows the password. 1.5440 0.02282 897 507 292 98
61 I liked Lance, sir. A lot. 1.5428 0.02304 877 496 286 95
62 He lived by the sword. But he died by the window. 1.5381 0.03664 394 237 102 55
63 Beats the hell out of the Myers-Briggs. 1.5366 0.02483 820 485 230 105
64 You know what? I think I'll work from home today. 1.5356 0.02340 814 458 276 80
65 Yeah, I mean they said any honest lawyer could pull it free. But... you know. 1.5353 0.02470 807 473 236 98
66 Looks like she got your email. 1.5338 0.02572 770 459 211 100
67 We'll have to get Arthur from personnel to remove it. 1.5332 0.02369 782 439 269 74
68 He's going really old school in choosing a successor. 1.5293 0.02393 752 422 262 68
69 Whosoever draws this sword from this desk shall receive a designated parking spot near the entrance. 1.5279 0.02455 735 418 246 71
70 That's Exchequer. Whoever pulls it out rules Accounting. 1.5277 0.02485 741 427 237 77
71 The new guy is asking for a round table. 1.5237 0.02617 716 427 203 86
72 There’s just one final step in your interview process... 1.5229 0.02631 700 416 202 82
73 The CEO job is as good as yours Arthur. 1.5184 0.02617 652 378 210 64
74 It's not like him to leave his laptop open. 1.5175 0.02802 659 406 165 88
75 Arthur, if you can get it out by noon, that'd be great. 1.5168 0.02639 654 383 204 67
76 Of course you get the job if you pull it out. But if you want benefits you'll need to slay a dragon, and don't even ask what you have to do to join the pension. 1.5168 0.02802 654 402 166 86
77 I personally think the laptop is mightier, but its up to you. 1.5155 0.02668 644 379 198 67
78 Well, that's about everyone. Should we let the women try? 1.5114 0.03938 350 222 77 51
79 This has 'OSHA violation' written all over it. 1.5063 0.02874 559 335 165 59
80 Call that kid Arthur in Shipping and see if he can pull it out 1.5060 0.02827 581 349 170 62
81 The job goeth to whoso pulleth out this sword, and whoso also passeth a routine drug test. 1.5052 0.02845 576 347 167 62
82 Another bad quarter and he'll get the axe. 1.5026 0.03015 567 357 135 75
83 Whosoever pulls the sword, shall control the thermostat. 1.5018 0.02875 556 335 163 58
84 It comes right out. Nobody wants the job. 1.5018 0.02966 558 345 146 67
85 Which one of the 4 items don't belong 1.5018 0.02915 560 342 155 63
86 No, it's easy to pull out. But if you do, the WiFi signal sucks. 1.4991 0.02951 545 334 150 61
87 Hey, you know Arthur who works in accounting?" "Get him up here. 1.4990 0.03055 523 324 137 62
88 We've not found a worthy occupant of this office since Arthur quit the firm. 1.4981 0.02837 538 319 170 49
89 You can come out now, Mr. President. Melania has left the building. 1.4962 0.03057 528 330 134 64
90 Tell Merlin in Personnel we may need him. 1.4960 0.02927 502 298 159 45
91 Call Arthur from accounting, it's happened again. 1.4952 0.02974 525 321 148 56
92 He didn't get the ax, but, same thing. 1.4942 0.02978 518 316 148 54
93 Sure, it’s not a stone but this is a junior position. 1.4942 0.02999 516 316 145 55
94 And if he asks you, just agree that it's mightier than a pen. 1.4942 0.03036 516 319 139 58
95 It's actually pretty easy. It's just that no-one wants the job. 1.4920 0.02846 498 291 169 38
96 I guess the meeting is cancelled. 1.4897 0.03042 435 255 147 33
97 We have a rather unique succession plan. 1.4888 0.02808 493 286 173 34
98 Yup, if not for his pen he would have been a goner. 1.4888 0.03133 489 306 127 56
99 It's the restroom key. 1.4887 0.03258 485 312 109 64
100 We're trying out new ideas for succession. This one was mentioned at our round table discussion. 1.4853 0.03054 476 291 139 46
101 Our two-factor authentication protocol is legendary. 1.4852 0.03087 472 290 135 47
102 Our screening process is legendary. 1.4839 0.03111 467 288 132 47
103 The company legend is that only the greatest backstabber will be able to remove it. 1.4826 0.03130 460 284 130 46
104 First you pull it out. Then you stick it in the backs of your employees. 1.4825 0.03303 458 294 107 57
105 If you pull it out you become CEO... but your best friend will sleep with your wife and Mordred in HR will want to see you. 1.4814 0.03160 457 284 126 47
106 Mightier in what way? 1.4813 0.03216 455 286 119 50
107 And this will be your office, once we get everything sworded out. 1.4798 0.03216 446 279 120 47
108 Sir, your wife left a note. 1.4786 0.03326 443 284 106 53
109 I know what you’re thinking. Yes, the landline is a bit old-fashioned. 1.4772 0.03161 438 270 127 41
110 We have a very thorough vetting process. 1.4771 0.02870 415 236 160 19
111 No, the guillotine is in our Paris office. 1.4770 0.03470 434 286 89 59
112 Strange, I thought he got axed. 1.4758 0.03448 414 267 97 50
113 No, I haven't tried. I don't really want to rule as King of accounts receivable. 1.4753 0.03589 324 197 100 27
114 We're having a lot of trouble filling this position. 1.4742 0.03207 426 264 122 40
115 We have a pretty simple hiring process here... 1.4731 0.03336 427 273 106 48
116 Corporate culture's a bit medieval here 1.4726 0.03211 402 245 124 33
117 This is the office for those who free-lance-a-lot. 1.4726 0.03471 402 259 96 47
118 Seriously, a memo would have sufficed. 1.4722 0.03361 396 248 109 39
119 It's our test for the corner office. 1.4713 0.02911 401 230 153 18
120 Sure the pen is mightier, but it looks way less badass. 1.4710 0.03497 414 272 89 53
121 And here we have the final step in your interview. Good luck. 1.4710 0.03344 414 263 107 44
122 Only a person without an abusive temperament, one who never covered up a corporate crime or suborned a politician, can wrench the sword free. When that person appears, trumpets will blare and security will usher him or her out of the building. 1.4709 0.03510 412 271 88 53
123 He says it's a letter opener, but I'm staying on his good side all the same. 1.4690 0.03262 403 250 117 36
124 So you really think you're the right man for the job? 1.4688 0.03117 401 241 132 28
125 We keep it here in case there is a time you need to fall on it. 1.4674 0.03362 383 239 109 35
126 Everyone else has tried, Arthur. 1.4639 0.03389 388 246 104 38
127 Well, Art, the promotion is certainly within your grasp. 1.4636 0.03638 343 219 89 35
128 We recently started casualty Friday. 1.4619 0.03667 381 255 76 50
129 We let Arthur go last year, but we're still trying to send him his things. 1.4619 0.03474 381 245 96 40
130 We have a new two-step verification system. 1.4613 0.03705 349 228 81 40
131 They say the pen is mightier, but trust me they are wrong. 1.4607 0.03450 356 223 102 31
132 I thought he was going to get the axe. 1.4563 0.03479 355 225 98 32
133 Actually, anyone could pull it out, but no one wants the position. 1.4553 0.03719 358 239 75 44
134 He'll be mythed. 1.4509 0.04849 224 154 39 31
135 I just don't see the point. 1.4509 0.03703 346 229 78 39
136 If you can pull it out you'll also get dental. 1.4506 0.03483 344 218 97 29
137 Never, never hide underneath the desk. 1.4497 0.03600 338 218 88 32
138 You'll be in accounts and pillages. 1.4497 0.03348 338 208 108 22
139 Configuring your voicemail will be way harder. 1.4493 0.03500 345 220 95 30
140 IT said to pull it out, and then push it back in. 1.4481 0.03959 308 206 66 36
141 She pulled the sword out okay but then she asked for a raise... 1.4472 0.03779 322 212 76 34
142 This is the final stage of your interview Mr Arthur 1.4452 0.03803 310 203 76 31
143 I guess you could say it was a hostile takeover. 1.4452 0.03748 310 201 80 29
144 Once a week Jared comes in to give it a tug. 1.4448 0.03843 326 219 69 38
145 ...then there's a knot in the VP's office you'll need to take care of. 1.4438 0.03566 329 211 90 28
146 The job is yours if you can pull it out. 1.4438 0.03768 329 219 74 36
147 Turns out the sword is mightier than the pen. 1.4431 0.03701 325 213 80 32
148 A simple resignation letter would have done the trick. 1.4431 0.03701 325 213 80 32
149 Yeah, the lamp needs to go. 1.4418 0.03942 292 193 69 30
150 It seemed like a good idea at the time, but it turns out it's really difficult to find a CEO that's pure of heart. 1.4412 0.04267 238 155 61 22
151 Hmm... I guess the sword IS mightier than the pen! 1.4409 0.03464 313 195 98 20
152 True, it’s not traditional Feng Shui, but it does focus the room’s energy. 1.4394 0.03999 264 171 70 23
153 Poor Donald. But please tell me that Pence is under there too. 1.4391 0.03995 312 214 59 39
154 Art must have just received his ancestry.com results. 1.4377 0.03746 313 206 77 30
155 ... and then the drug test and background check. 1.4367 0.03593 300 190 89 21
156 The easy part is drawing the sword, but then you must come up with a password that's at least eight characters long, includes a number and a symbol, and that you haven't used in the past six months. 1.4361 0.03872 305 204 69 32
157 My boss hasn't been the same since he went to that Renaissance fair upstate. 1.4361 0.03642 305 196 85 24
158 We’re generally a pretty easy-going firm, but some things are set in stone. 1.4351 0.04039 285 192 62 31
159 One more thing and the job is yours! 1.4333 0.03653 300 193 84 23
160 Last update I got from him about the report was that he'd taken a stab at it. 1.4317 0.03817 278 180 76 22
161 I think he said he needed a round table. 1.4310 0.03738 297 194 78 25
162 Legend says that if you pull it out, you get Ron’s parking spot. 1.4307 0.03924 274 180 70 24
163 You're lucky - mine's a plowshare. 1.4305 0.03786 295 194 75 26
164 I thought you said you got the axe. 1.4305 0.03847 295 196 71 28
165 No one can pull it out. But that has less to do with destiny and more to do with solid mahogany. 1.4301 0.03768 272 174 79 19
166 If you pull this off, you'll be a legend. 1.4286 0.03828 287 189 73 25
167 Gives new meaning to the word 'severance'. 1.4281 0.03973 285 192 64 29
168 Legend has it that one day a just, wise, and equitable CEO will come to pull out the sword. So of course nobody has even bothered to try. 1.4276 0.03962 283 190 65 28
169 On the plus side, we’ve been without a CEO for ages 1.4271 0.03754 288 188 77 23
170 We used to engage executive search firms, but this is a lot cheaper and works just as well. 1.4266 0.03739 286 186 78 22
171 Ignore that, it's just part of the severence package. 1.4266 0.03931 286 192 66 28
172 Let's wait. He usually only steps out for one brief shining moment. 1.4266 0.03931 286 192 66 28
173 Oh, we can find someone to pull out the sword. What we need is a CEO that can keep his hands to himself. 1.4266 0.03993 286 194 62 30
174 The associates are calling it Deskalibur. 1.4259 0.04031 270 181 63 26
175 But if she succeeds when we let her try, then what? 1.4249 0.04622 193 127 50 16
176 Having slain the unicorn, this is your next task. 1.4245 0.03812 278 182 74 22
177 He thinks he's a great manager of people but he can't figure out why his drawer won't open. 1.4239 0.04224 276 193 49 34
178 YOU try !! I got a hernia !! 1.4239 0.04065 276 188 59 29
179 At least that's not hanging over his head any more. 1.4229 0.03869 279 185 70 24
180 It's not what you think. He gets really big letters. 1.4229 0.04189 279 195 50 34
181 Looks like we've been hacked again. 1.4201 0.03933 269 179 67 23
182 Merlin & Co is running our CEO search. 1.4189 0.03974 265 177 65 23
183 We've got a super simple promotion process, actually 1.4189 0.04081 265 180 59 26
184 It’s actually quite easy to remove - nobody wants the job! 1.4189 0.03790 265 172 75 18
185 Beats getting it in the back 1.4189 0.03938 265 176 67 22
186 This was Damocles' office. 1.4185 0.03957 270 181 65 24
187 HR says this will eliminate the need for a search committee. 1.4179 0.03870 268 177 70 21
188 You'll be in Damocles' old office. 1.4157 0.03915 267 178 67 22
189 Not only could he not remove the sword, but he had issues with the dagger in his back. 1.4153 0.04164 248 168 57 23
190 It comes right out, actually. But always tell the client how impressed you are. 1.4147 0.04047 258 174 61 23
191 It's a subtle reminder not to write captions for the New Yorker on company time. 1.4141 0.04107 256 174 58 24
192 You'll be working the knight shift. 1.4134 0.03937 254 168 67 19
193 They say that whoever pulls the sword from the desk will be Trump's next cabinet appointee, so everyone's been avoiding it. 1.4134 0.04130 254 173 57 24
194 Well, rumour has it the last person to pull it out fell on it at the end of the next quarter. 1.4134 0.04015 254 170 63 21
195 Now you can live by the sword, die by the sword, email by the sword, make calls by the sword and enjoy the view by the sword. 1.4134 0.04167 254 174 55 25
196 The legend is that whoever releases the Sword of Mar-a-Lago from its mahogany prison shall be freed from all accountability forever. 1.4134 0.04167 254 174 55 25
197 This is why you have security escort them out. 1.4134 0.04054 254 171 61 22
198 It's a test from Corporate. Don't pull it out; just push it in further. 1.4134 0.04054 254 171 61 22
199 We've found it to be more effective than sexual harassment training. 1.4134 0.04204 254 175 53 26
200 Well, this is awkward. I meant to give you the axe. 1.4134 0.04054 254 171 61 22
201 No Arthur, this is Deskaliber. 1.4134 0.04204 254 175 53 26
202 We need a wizard to turn this company around. 1.4118 0.04003 255 171 63 21
203 Pulling it out is only the beginning: you must also stab your partners in the back. 1.4104 0.03967 251 167 65 19
204 I'm not sure our anger management course is working. 1.4089 0.03969 247 164 65 18
205 Still beats the electoral college 1.4074 0.04259 243 168 51 24
206 Well at least we now know the sword is mightier than a particle board desk. 1.4074 0.03927 243 160 67 16
207 At the tip is the key to the executive washroom 1.4074 0.04096 243 164 59 20
208 For a CEO position, it's a very short interview process. 1.4074 0.03883 243 159 69 15
209 He lived by the sword but was axed by the board. 1.4074 0.04219 243 167 53 23
210 We used to use Myers-Briggs; this test has a better track record. 1.4074 0.04137 243 165 57 21
211 The Lady of the Lake will be out of the office till Tuesday. 1.4073 0.03956 248 165 65 18
212 The pen is mightier, but this is way more dramatic. 1.4073 0.03997 248 166 63 19
213 This is your new office. The last guy got the axe. 1.4073 0.04157 248 170 55 23
214 ...and so Arthur, for your final test... 1.4073 0.04196 248 171 53 24
215 Arthur doesn’t believe in passwords. 1.4073 0.04157 248 170 55 23
216 IT’S EXCALIBUR ?? THAT’S hard to swallow. 1.4073 0.04235 248 172 51 25
217 Do you have a pen? 1.4066 0.04161 241 164 56 21
218 Only the one true CEO can lead King Arthur Flour. 1.4066 0.04243 241 166 52 23
219 So, this is Damocles' old office? 1.4050 0.04188 242 166 54 22
220 Well, I hope you weren't exaggerating in your resume. 1.4050 0.04229 242 167 52 23
221 Many have tried and many have failed. I’d recommend hand sanitizer. 1.4050 0.04064 242 163 60 19
222 A Post-It would’ve sufficed. 1.4050 0.04349 242 170 46 26
223 And he who removes the sword brings donuts on Tuesdays. 1.4050 0.04064 242 163 60 19
224 This is strange, I never noticed the flag on that building before. 1.4050 0.04188 242 166 54 22
225 And here’s your office. The sword is built in, for when you need to fall on it. 1.4008 0.04120 237 161 57 19
226 Arthur, Arthur and Arthur will always be a family run law firm. 1.4008 0.04205 237 163 53 21
227 They say if you can pull it out you can win the New Yorker cartoon caption contest. 1.4008 0.04372 237 167 45 25
228 We’ve given up on finding a decent CEO. We’re looking for a king now. 1.4008 0.04248 237 164 51 22
229 Looks like it's come down to whoever has the most pull. 1.4008 0.03942 237 157 65 15
230 You'll be on the knight shift. 1.4008 0.04205 237 163 53 21
231 He was a great boss, but never quite had what it took to be legendary. 1.4000 0.04022 230 153 62 15
232 This is in lieu of an interview. Give it a try. 1.3991 0.04078 233 157 59 17
233 Actually, ANYONE can pull it out. The challenge is to remove the inventory control tag without setting off the detector. 1.3991 0.03939 233 154 65 14
234 Our headhunters wanted to try a more classical recruiting approach. 1.3991 0.04045 228 152 61 15
235 Phew. I thought the board would hire a hatchet man. 1.3991 0.04322 228 158 49 21
236 You could say it was a hostile takeover. 1.3991 0.04045 228 152 61 15
237 We said we were looking to hire high caliber people, Johnson, not Excalibur people. 1.3991 0.04454 228 161 43 24
238 I prefer the pen. 1.3991 0.04045 228 152 61 15
239 We tried to tell him it wasn’t set in stone. 1.3991 0.04277 228 157 51 20
240 He just painted his face blue, yelled "freedom," and walked out. 1.3991 0.04411 228 160 45 23
241 We thought so, too, but pulling on it just makes the building fart. 1.3991 0.04454 228 161 43 24
242 You have to have a lot of pull to get this office... 1.3991 0.04322 228 158 49 21
243 No one remembers the password. 1.3991 0.04367 228 159 47 22
244 There's just one remaining step in the interview process. 1.3991 0.04391 213 146 49 18
245 Beats me. Let's ask Arthur. 1.3974 0.04217 229 157 53 19
246 It’s not a job it’s a calling. 1.3974 0.04078 229 154 59 16
247 Behold, Deskalibur! 1.3927 0.04347 219 152 48 19
248 They say it takes the strength of 1,500 average-salary employees to remove it. 1.3919 0.04535 222 159 39 24
249 You said you were born for this job, now prove it. 1.3919 0.04061 222 149 59 14
250 Legend says he who removes it shall reign over all of New England Regional Marketing and Sales. 1.3919 0.03907 222 146 65 11
251 Suddenly, the round table in the conference room makes a little more sense. 1.3915 0.04346 212 146 49 17
252 Don't tell me. The conference room has a round table. 1.3915 0.04189 212 143 55 14
253 Let the intern handle it. 1.3915 0.04242 212 144 53 15
254 Makes as much sense as the Electoral College 1.3909 0.04426 220 155 44 21
255 They say only the true Vice President of Marketing Communications can remove it. 1.3909 0.04085 220 148 58 14
256 HR says it'll eliminate the need for background checks. 1.3907 0.04252 215 147 52 16
257 I don’t care about being king or CEO or whatever, I just want that letter opener. 1.3907 0.03988 215 142 62 11
258 No... it's just a letter opener. 1.3897 0.04011 213 141 61 11
259 Welch couldn’t. Fiorina choked. Musk and Bezos failed. Get real, Artie. You work in the mail room. 1.3897 0.04278 213 146 51 16
260 If you move it the other way it locks the door. 1.3897 0.04066 213 142 59 12
261 It can only be picked up by a Republican with moral character ... it has been there since the end of the Reagan presidency ... 1.3897 0.04481 213 150 43 20
262 Bought the letter opener online, it looked smaller. 1.3897 0.04120 213 143 57 13
263 I know the pen is mightier, but this makes a better point. 1.3895 0.04452 190 129 48 13
264 It makes a strong statement, but it's terrible ergonomically. 1.3889 0.04236 216 148 52 16
265 We've streamlined our pre employment screening. 1.3889 0.04133 216 146 56 14
266 Cake in the break room. 1.3881 0.04437 219 155 43 21
267 It’s just the best letter opener I’ve ever used. And it never gets lost! 1.3879 0.04414 214 150 45 19
268 Maybe we should just go with a recruiter. 1.3879 0.04262 214 147 51 16
269 Just don't stick your neck out for anybody. 1.3879 0.04313 214 148 49 17
270 Many men have tried and failed to remove the sword from the desk. They each received generous severance packages. 1.3879 0.04210 214 146 53 15
271 Wouldn't it be easier for him to just leave the business to his son? 1.3879 0.04313 214 148 49 17
272 Honestly, anything is better than the Electoral College. 1.3868 0.04443 212 149 44 19
273 Deskcalibur. 1.3868 0.04443 212 149 44 19
274 I was actually stunned to find these desk accessories at IKEA. 1.3868 0.04392 212 148 46 18
275 HR thought it up. 1.3868 0.04183 212 144 54 14
276 Ugh, I barely made it up the beanstalk in the last interview. 1.3868 0.04289 212 146 50 16
277 And this is our cutting edge department 1.3868 0.04443 212 149 44 19
278 I see your request for a new desk was denied. 1.3868 0.03964 212 140 62 10
279 I’ve asked him to take a stab at new office decor. 1.3868 0.04289 212 146 50 16
280 Can we conclude he was wrong about being able to pardon himself? 1.3865 0.04414 207 144 46 17
281 The pen didn't stand a chance. 1.3840 0.05540 125 86 30 9
282 I told him the pen was mightier, but he still wanted the sword. 1.3839 0.04299 211 146 49 16
283 We haven’t had a CEO for a thousand years. 1.3824 0.04345 204 141 48 15
284 No, its a just a handle that opens and closes the drapes. 1.3793 0.04731 203 148 33 22
285 Who even uses landlines anymore? 1.3793 0.04731 203 148 33 22
286 The last guy fell on it. 1.3793 0.04356 203 141 47 15
287 We've been hacked. 1.3793 0.04574 203 145 39 19
288 We’re Farmers, and we covered it. 1.3793 0.04520 203 144 41 18
289 The lady of the water cooler told me to check this out. 1.3793 0.04356 203 141 47 15
290 Unfortunately, he didn’t have enough pull. 1.3793 0.04066 203 136 57 10
291 Melania must have been looking for Donald 1.3793 0.04783 203 149 31 23
292 The last guy who had this office was a legend. 1.3793 0.04574 203 145 39 19
293 Seems the sword is mightier after all. 1.3769 0.04413 199 139 45 15
294 Whoever can pull it out will make 400 times what one of our workers makes. 1.3763 0.04550 194 137 41 16
295 Wait till you see his pen. 1.3756 0.04725 197 143 34 20
296 At least he didn't get the ax. 1.3756 0.04384 197 137 46 14
297 Pull it out and the job is yours. 1.3756 0.04939 197 147 26 24
298 On the plus side, we’ve been without a CEO for ages 1.3756 0.04442 197 138 44 15
299 HR has really streamlined the hiring process. 1.3756 0.04078 197 132 56 9
300 I specifically requested a round table. 1.3756 0.04725 197 143 34 20
301 He's downstairs leading a round-table discussion with some marketing wizards. 1.3744 0.04814 195 143 31 21
302 I mean, yeah, I knew he was mad, but sword-in-the-desk mad?? 1.3737 0.04302 190 130 49 11
303 Here at Camelot Industries our interview process is a simple one. 1.3731 0.04320 193 133 48 12
304 It's a rigged test: There's no such thing as a CEO with a pure heart. 1.3731 0.04443 193 135 44 14
305 The culture here is somewhat passive-aggressive. 1.3731 0.04382 193 134 46 13
306 Type in your username, pull the sword, and you're logged on. 1.3731 0.04793 193 141 32 20
307 Our interview process is pretty simple, actually. 1.3717 0.04411 191 133 45 13
308 This explains the round table in the break room. 1.3717 0.04713 191 138 35 18
309 You can come out now sir ... he's gone. 1.3717 0.04348 191 132 47 12
310 He works the knight shift. 1.3717 0.04534 191 135 41 15
311 The pen lost. 1.3717 0.04654 191 137 37 17
312 Clearly it's still here, but if anyone asks, we're supposed to say, "it was the most tremendous thing, the only person to pull it out, very tremendous." 1.3717 0.04595 191 136 39 16
313 He won't be hiding under his desk anymore. 1.3717 0.04154 191 129 53 9
314 We were really excited when we saw “known for persistence and problem solving” listed on your resume. 1.3717 0.04348 191 132 47 12
315 It's Warren Buffet's succession plan 1.3717 0.04771 191 139 33 19
316 Actually, Artie, I have a good feeling about your chances. 1.3717 0.04087 191 128 55 8
317 Our ideal candidate is creative, driven, and a rightful leader. 1.3717 0.04284 191 131 49 11
318 We’re going to need a rounder table. 1.3717 0.04219 191 130 51 10
319 It's been like this ever since his genetic testing results came back. 1.3717 0.04473 191 134 43 14
320 The job posting says you're supposed to be good at leading round table discussions as well. 1.3717 0.04534 191 135 41 15
321 We're looking for someone of a high calibur. 1.3717 0.04595 191 136 39 16
322 Again?! Get Arthur. 1.3717 0.04473 191 134 43 14
323 Little Arthur, the messenger boy, is the only one who hasn't tried yet. 1.3717 0.04284 191 131 49 11
324 He gave his fortnight notice. 1.3717 0.04473 191 134 43 14
325 One day, a middle manager will come. 1.3717 0.04595 191 136 39 16
326 Like I told you in the interview, we work knights. 1.3717 0.04713 191 138 35 18
327 It's not as difficult as mastering Excel. 1.3717 0.04473 191 134 43 14
328 I knew buying that round table for the boardroom was a mistake. 1.3717 0.04284 191 131 49 11
329 If we’d ordered the regular size letter openers, this never would have happened. 1.3717 0.04219 191 130 51 10
330 They said only the chosen one can remove the sword and become CEO. Rumor has it, the janitor pulled it out last night, but HR put it back and will not speak of the matter. 1.3711 0.04543 194 138 40 16
331 I thought he got the axe? 1.3704 0.04377 189 131 46 12
332 They call it "Deskcalibur." 1.3704 0.04566 189 134 40 15
333 It's just a formality, really. 1.3704 0.04504 189 133 42 14
334 The board is interviewing Arthur somebody for CEO. British, I believe. 1.3704 0.04377 189 131 46 12
335 I don't think he understood when I said "leave a message." 1.3690 0.04842 187 137 31 19
336 Drop it off at HR if you are the true VP of operations. 1.3690 0.04341 187 129 47 11
337 The culture here is a bit medieval. 1.3690 0.04471 187 131 43 13
338 Our CEO selection process is legendary. 1.3690 0.04067 187 125 55 7
339 You should see the corner office challenge. 1.3690 0.04471 187 131 43 13
340 I mean you can have a go, but frankly, the office next door is nicer. 1.3684 0.03956 190 126 58 6
341 And as for this job, we have unfortunately been having trouble finding someone of just the right Excalibur. 1.3656 0.04915 186 138 28 20
342 That's the thing about working for Merlin, he's kind of old school... 1.3656 0.04547 186 132 40 14
343 You just missed him, he's in a round table meeting till 10. 1.3656 0.04417 186 130 44 12
344 We have really big envelopes here. 1.3656 0.04417 186 130 44 12
345 They must be looking for someone of a certain caliber. 1.3656 0.04483 186 131 42 13
346 HR has taken this new ‘roundtable’ initiative a little too far. 1.3656 0.04796 186 136 32 18
347 I found a guy who can do it, but he wants a round table. 1.3611 0.04712 180 130 35 15
348 He'll be out for a while. Hernia surgery. 1.3596 0.04747 178 129 34 15
349 Arthur took exception with the concept that the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.3596 0.04747 178 129 34 15
350 Three factor authentication sucks. 1.3596 0.04813 178 130 32 16
351 Just one more task and your promotion will be finalized. 1.3596 0.04813 178 130 32 16
352 Yes, I know it is rife with symbolism. Nontheless, I still think it's bad design. 1.3596 0.04611 178 127 38 13
353 I see no CEO replacement has met the recruitment requirements 1.3563 0.04386 174 121 44 9
354 You have to admit, it's better than our current election process. 1.3563 0.04750 174 126 34 14
355 I told you it would be a hostile takeover. 1.3563 0.04461 174 122 42 10
356 He didn't say a word. Just showed everybody his winning lotto ticket, stuck that thing in his desk, and walked out the door! 1.3563 0.04955 174 129 28 17
357 And here is where the magic happens. 1.3563 0.04679 174 125 36 13
358 Arthur always has the coolest paperweights 1.3563 0.04750 174 126 34 14
359 He usually forgets his keys. 1.3533 0.04501 167 117 41 9
360 This part of the interview will be a little more hands-on. 1.3529 0.04676 170 122 36 12
361 Corporate raiders, by the look of things. 1.3529 0.04525 170 120 40 10
362 Congratulations, you’ve reached the final stage in our interview process! 1.3529 0.04823 170 124 32 14
363 Legend has it the True Leader of the Free World will pluck the sword free once the swamp is drained 1.3515 0.04614 165 117 38 10
364 Our algorithm stripped the interview process down to the essentials. 1.3512 0.04635 168 120 37 11
365 I won't miss the drama. 1.3512 0.04558 168 119 39 10
366 Well, I guess it's down to the two of us, Artie. 1.3512 0.04479 168 118 41 9
367 This is the skill test for women candidates. 1.3512 0.05076 168 126 25 17
368 This is our CEO’s idea of a succession plan. 1.3512 0.04787 168 122 33 13
369 Oh gosh no. That just turns on the computer. 1.3512 0.04558 168 119 39 10
370 I think I've found Arthur's letter opener. 1.3512 0.05005 168 125 27 16
371 If ye can initiate a three-party conference call using that phone on the first try, the job shall be yours forever more. 1.3512 0.05005 168 125 27 16
372 Actually, it's just the light switch. 1.3494 0.04973 166 123 28 15
373 The good news is that the spider is definitely dead... 1.3494 0.04748 166 120 34 12
374 Did you see the 15 century gap in his resume? He said he was 'finding himself'. 1.3494 0.04748 166 120 34 12
375 Go ahead, Art. Give it a try. 1.3494 0.04175 166 113 48 5
376 Get Merlin from accounting. He'll get rid of this. 1.3494 0.05188 166 126 22 18
377 Notice there is no pen. 1.3494 0.04591 166 118 38 10
378 An MBA from Harvard is not enough to become CEO any more. 1.3494 0.04670 166 119 36 11
379 He left for more noble pursuits. 1.3494 0.04748 166 120 34 12
380 Legend has it that the one who removes it gets 300 times more pay, a penthouse apartment, and a new desk. 1.3494 0.04824 166 121 32 13
381 We don't give the corner office to just anybody. 1.3494 0.04748 166 120 34 12
382 And of course the Lady of the Lake would be your administrative assistant. 1.3494 0.04748 166 120 34 12
383 and I thought he got the axe. 1.3494 0.04899 166 122 30 14
384 Unfortunately, no, it isn't a metaphor. 1.3494 0.04511 166 117 40 9
385 No Pressure. 1.3481 0.04745 158 113 35 10
386 Call IT. We’ve been hacked. 1.3476 0.04625 164 117 37 10
387 It comes out easily, actually, but nobody wants the job. 1.3476 0.04938 164 121 29 14
388 Looks like Arthur is getting the promotion. 1.3476 0.04625 164 117 37 10
389 Arthur said he had a new idea for choosing the next vice president. 1.3476 0.04938 164 121 29 14
390 Now do you understand the shape of the table in the board room? 1.3476 0.04376 164 114 43 7
391 There's just one last interview question... 1.3476 0.04202 164 112 47 5
392 They say only Robert Mueller can pull it out. 1.3476 0.04938 164 121 29 14
393 I knew Medieval Mondays was a bad idea... 1.3457 0.04660 162 116 36 10
394 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk . . . is still an exhausted and defeated middle-manager with little hope for real success or even appreciation. 1.3457 0.05055 162 121 26 15
395 We take the headhunting business seriously. 1.3457 0.04660 162 116 36 10
396 He thought it was a step up from ‘the buck stops here’. 1.3457 0.04493 162 114 40 8
397 The standards for promotion here are pretty competitive... 1.3457 0.04742 162 117 34 11
398 The search committee came up with another requirement. 1.3457 0.04406 162 113 42 7
399 Do you think you have what it takes to work at Excalibur Investments? 1.3457 0.04742 162 117 34 11
400 No no no...HIGH caliber. I said I hope our new manager is HIGH caliber. 1.3439 0.04671 157 112 36 9
401 If you succeed, your next challenge will be pulling the cell phone from the intern’s hand. 1.3418 0.04816 158 115 32 11
402 No need for interviews—we’re looking for just the right person to run the King Arthur Flour Company. 1.3418 0.04646 158 113 36 9
403 Just try to leverage it. 1.3418 0.04469 158 111 40 7
404 I take it the Exit Interview did not go well 1.3418 0.04646 158 113 36 9
405 This isn't what I had in mind when I told you to stick it to the man 1.3418 0.04899 158 116 30 12
406 Don't worry, I have a pen. 1.3418 0.04981 158 117 28 13
407 This IS the interview. 1.3418 0.04646 158 113 36 9
408 He always said the pen was mightier than the sword. 1.3418 0.04899 158 116 30 12
409 It's double-edged. Tough on hiring, but makes for quick work on exit interviews. 1.3397 0.04855 156 114 31 11
410 Looks like Mr. Zorro has stepped out for a sandwich. 1.3397 0.04769 156 113 33 10
411 It would appear the CEO position is still open. 1.3397 0.04855 156 114 31 11
412 I guess they finally pierced the corporate veil. 1.3397 0.04855 156 114 31 11
413 We've had five applicants, and so far, five hernias. 1.3397 0.04769 156 113 33 10
414 So Arthur, this will be your new office. 1.3397 0.05022 156 116 27 13
415 Granted, it's a bit medieval, but selecting a CEO based on integrity hasn't exactly worked out. 1.3397 0.04855 156 114 31 11
416 Whoever pulls the sword from this desk also gets reserved parking. 1.3397 0.04681 156 112 35 9
417 Actually, it's the dimmer for the lamp. 1.3397 0.04681 156 112 35 9
418 A job of mythic proportions. 1.3377 0.04894 154 113 30 11
419 Was that there when we left? 1.3377 0.04894 154 113 30 11
420 ...I said we want higher CALIBER employees 1.3377 0.05148 154 116 24 14
421 The day he quit was legendary. 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
422 Is there any way this is good news? 1.3356 0.04427 149 104 40 5
423 It's a bit archaic, but it's a proven method 1.3356 0.04427 149 104 40 5
424 Let's try some WD-40. 1.3355 0.04845 152 111 31 10
425 you're lucky; most people don't have a phone. 1.3355 0.05108 152 114 25 13
426 We had to find a way for the male executives to have a dick measuring contest without literally having a dick measuring contest. 1.3355 0.04755 152 110 33 9
427 Is this his way of telling us he wants a round table? 1.3355 0.04935 152 112 29 11
428 Bet you it still goes to the boss's kid. 1.3355 0.05358 152 117 19 16
429 Bob, is this meeting set in stone? 1.3355 0.04755 152 110 33 9
430 Finish this last part of the interview, and the job is yours. 1.3355 0.04935 152 112 29 11
431 I heard they were making cuts at the top. 1.3333 0.04698 150 108 34 8
432 It's password protected. 1.3333 0.04885 150 110 30 10
433 A hernia took out the last CEO candidate. 1.3333 0.04663 147 105 35 7
434 Or bring in the head of Medusa and you can have the corner office. 1.3333 0.05152 150 113 24 13
435 We never needed the pure-of-heart before. 1.3333 0.04976 150 111 28 11
436 He always leaves his desk so neat. 1.3333 0.04562 147 104 37 6
437 You know it's going to be a woman who pulls it out. Right? 1.3333 0.04885 150 110 30 10
438 For now, you’ll be in Mr. Damocles’ old office. 1.3333 0.05152 150 113 24 13
439 Whoso pulleth out this sword gets a key to the executive washroom. 1.3333 0.04403 150 105 40 5
440 Can I assume the conference room has a round table? 1.3333 0.04885 150 110 30 10
441 She doesn't believe that nonsense about the pen. 1.3333 0.05065 150 112 26 12
442 I guess Arthur quit. 1.3333 0.05065 150 112 26 12
443 It's pretty much what you think. 1.3333 0.04504 150 106 38 6
444 This brings us to the final part of our interview. 1.3333 0.04698 150 108 34 8
445 The last person behind this desk was a real legend. 1.3311 0.04735 148 107 33 8
446 I heard the job is up for grabs. 1.3311 0.04925 148 109 29 10
447 No, you pull it. 1.3311 0.04637 148 106 35 7
448 Since Dodd-Frank, we’ve been taking a fresh approach to executive promotions. 1.3311 0.05018 148 110 27 11
449 And this is the HR department. 1.3311 0.04831 148 108 31 9
450 Were thinking it makes as much sense as the Electoral College. 1.3311 0.05109 148 111 25 12
451 At least we aren't getting the ax. 1.3311 0.04537 148 105 37 6
452 At least I won't have that hanging over my head anymore. 1.3311 0.04637 148 106 35 7
453 ...so did you get the spider? 1.3311 0.04925 148 109 29 10
454 Yes, you could say that the corporate takeover was hostile. 1.3311 0.04735 148 107 33 8
455 If you can pull it out, you won't have to work here anymore. 1.3311 0.05109 148 111 25 12
456 It’s the new Excalibur mouse 1.3311 0.05018 148 110 27 11
457 You go ahead, my hernia's acting up. 1.3311 0.04831 148 108 31 9
458 Even after a year President Trump still can't manage to budge it 1.3311 0.05109 148 111 25 12
459 In lieu of interviews, we're taking a different approach with all our job candidates. 1.3311 0.04925 148 109 29 10
460 We find this is a much faster hiring process 1.3304 0.05051 115 81 30 4
461 I would try, but this isn't the kingdom I imagined. 1.3288 0.05061 146 109 26 11
462 Yes, Arthur was forced to resign, but he had a damn good sense of humor. 1.3288 0.04570 146 104 36 6
463 This explains the round table in the conference room. 1.3288 0.04967 146 108 28 10
464 Your new office, where you'll be in charge of cost cutting. 1.3288 0.04967 146 108 28 10
465 Don’t get too excited. We just need you to fix the desk. 1.3288 0.04773 146 106 32 8
466 And he was afraid he'd get the axe.... 1.3288 0.04967 146 108 28 10
467 Yeah, so now the sword is mightier. 1.3288 0.04967 146 108 28 10
468 Apparently there's been a hostile takeover. 1.3288 0.04871 146 107 30 9
469 You must be better liked, the previous general manager was stabbed in the back. 1.3288 0.04673 146 105 34 7
470 The round table arrives next week. 1.3288 0.04871 146 107 30 9
471 At least they didn´t give him the axe 1.3288 0.05061 146 109 26 11
472 Believe it or not, it was a paper-cut that finally got him. 1.3288 0.05061 146 109 26 11
473 The CEO proposed it to the Board as his succession plan. 1.3288 0.04871 146 107 30 9
474 Wait, wrong office. 1.3288 0.05061 146 109 26 11
475 This is why my wife tells me I can't work from home. 1.3288 0.05061 146 109 26 11
476 We can have our maintenance guy Arthur remove it for you. 1.3288 0.05244 146 111 22 13
477 I guess he had more than an axe to grind. 1.3288 0.04967 146 108 28 10
478 We've simplified our vetting process... 1.3264 0.04709 144 104 33 7
479 Huge upset. The pen lost. 1.3264 0.05199 144 109 23 12
480 ...and worse yet, he's starting calling me Sancho. 1.3264 0.05105 144 108 25 11
481 We're still waiting for the one true boss to appear. 1.3264 0.05009 144 107 27 10
482 The story of this company is the story of its dyslexic founder, Arthur King. 1.3264 0.05009 144 107 27 10
483 After Brexit, no one has even tried pulling it out because no one wants to rule Britain. 1.3264 0.05383 144 111 19 14
484 No, Ed, I said let’s bury the hatchet! 1.3262 0.04667 141 101 34 6
485 We’re still waiting for the rightful heir to the company. 1.3239 0.04952 142 105 28 9
486 That’s weird. The boss still has a land line on his desk. 1.3239 0.05150 142 107 24 11
487 It's a letter opener, or it makes you King, not sure which. 1.3239 0.04850 142 104 30 8
488 The last guy got quite the severance 1.3239 0.05052 142 106 26 10
489 Well, at least he didn't get the axe. 1.3239 0.05052 142 106 26 10
490 It hasn't been the same since the hostile takeover. 1.3239 0.05246 142 108 22 12
491 Call Arthur, in accounting. 1.3239 0.04640 142 102 34 6
492 I see I need to have a talk with the person who prepared your office. I clearly said you were a lefty. 1.3239 0.04850 142 104 30 8
493 We do our hiring the old fashioned way 1.3239 0.04640 142 102 34 6
494 And now for the final portion of your interview. 1.3239 0.05150 142 107 24 11
495 Our last CEO was a legend. 1.3239 0.04952 142 105 28 9
496 Yes, you can stand on the desk... 1.3239 0.05052 142 106 26 10
497 He said something about meeting up with Guinevere for spin class and left. 1.3239 0.04952 142 105 28 9
498 There was no chance for upward nobility. 1.3239 0.04746 142 103 32 7
499 We have one more test before we can make you a job offer. 1.3239 0.05052 142 106 26 10
500 When I said take a stab at it I was speaking figuratively 1.3239 0.05052 142 106 26 10
501 And then he got all medieval on me. 1.3239 0.04952 142 105 28 9
502 I'm sick of the riddles. Did I get the promotion or not? 1.3237 0.04476 139 98 37 4
503 People kept stealing the letter opener. 1.3214 0.04784 140 102 31 7
504 He always said he really would have preferred a round desk. 1.3214 0.05294 140 107 21 12
505 Maybe the sword is mightier than the pen... 1.3214 0.05294 140 107 21 12
506 You have until the end of the day, then tomorrow you have to go and find the Golden Fleece. 1.3214 0.05096 140 105 25 10
507 Our hiring procedure is old school. 1.3214 0.04450 140 99 37 4
508 "Pendragon's old school. He said the once and future head of HR will reveal himself". 1.3214 0.05096 140 105 25 10
509 And here's the office of the once and future CEO. 1.3214 0.04890 140 103 29 8
510 It's entry level, but you have to be the chosen one. 1.3214 0.04675 140 101 33 6
511 Can you call Arthur from the mail room to get rid of that? 1.3214 0.04675 140 101 33 6
512 You'll be taking Mr. Damocles old office. 1.3214 0.05096 140 105 25 10
513 This gives new meaning to "severance pay," doesn't it? 1.3214 0.04890 140 103 29 8
514 And with your promotion, the excutive letter opener. 1.3214 0.05096 140 105 25 10
515 I’m guessing it was a hostile takeover. 1.3214 0.04675 140 101 33 6
516 And now, for the final part of the interview 1.3214 0.04890 140 103 29 8
517 Now I understand why there's a round table in the conference room. 1.3214 0.04994 140 104 27 9
518 Should I look under the desk, or do you want to? 1.3214 0.04450 140 99 37 4
519 I hope this isn't what he meant by cutting edge... 1.3214 0.04994 140 104 27 9
520 HR is really having a tough time finding Arthur’s replacement 1.3214 0.04890 140 103 29 8
521 This was Damocles' office. 1.3214 0.05390 140 108 19 13
522 He must get some very big envelopes. 1.3214 0.04784 140 102 31 7
523 No. You do not get to be CEO if you pull it out. Just the head of security. 1.3214 0.04890 140 103 29 8
524 Behold: the key to the executive bathroom. 1.3214 0.04890 140 103 29 8
525 Legend says that whoever pulls it out is the rightful CEO 1.3214 0.04564 140 100 35 5
526 See? And they won't let me have a plant in my office. 1.3214 0.05294 140 107 21 12
527 My pen fails to set the same tone. 1.3214 0.04994 140 104 27 9
528 Art took the day off to look for a round desk. 1.3214 0.04994 140 104 27 9
529 He was legendary. 1.3214 0.04994 140 104 27 9
530 I just know that it's a message, and it's not a good one. 1.3214 0.04784 140 102 31 7
531 The boss is obviously not about to fall on it any time soon. 1.3214 0.04890 140 103 29 8
532 It doesn't matter. He won the Electoral College. 1.3214 0.05294 140 107 21 12
533 The prophecy speaks of the One True MBA. 1.3214 0.05196 140 106 23 11
534 And I was scared we’d get the axe. 1.3214 0.04784 140 102 31 7
535 …and that’s when this gigantic turtle with a fucking bandana around its eyes, I shit you not, dropped from the ceiling and stabbed my desk. I seriously don’t even know how to begin filing the Facilities department work order. 1.3203 0.05426 128 97 21 10
536 He wants you to take care of this first and then make that Russia nonsense go away. 1.3188 0.05243 138 105 22 11
537 Get the sword out of the desk and the job is yours, no questions asked. 1.3188 0.04823 138 101 30 7
538 Letter opener? Who send letters? 1.3188 0.04482 138 98 36 4
539 I always thought the E stood for Executive. 1.3188 0.04931 138 102 28 8
540 In lieu of an interview, you get one pull. 1.3188 0.05441 138 107 18 13
541 Er, we practice 'lore' here, not law. 1.3188 0.05343 138 106 20 12
542 It appears that 'the pen is mightier than the sword' was also fake news. 1.3188 0.05141 138 104 24 10
543 One last thing before you’re hired. 1.3188 0.04823 138 101 30 7
544 He needed it to open the letter from North Korea. 1.3188 0.05141 138 104 24 10
545 Apparently special counsel Mueller stuck it there and no one in the Administration has been able to pull it out! 1.3188 0.04823 138 101 30 7
546 I had no idea they were filming the Apprentice here. 1.3188 0.05343 138 106 20 12
547 And you thought the drug test was hard! 1.3188 0.05037 138 103 26 9
548 Apparently he was last seen falling on his pen 1.3188 0.05037 138 103 26 9
549 Quick get a pen! 1.3188 0.05037 138 103 26 9
550 Anyone could be our next CEO--it's not set in stone. 1.3188 0.05243 138 105 22 11
551 The position comes with a title. 1.3188 0.04598 138 99 34 5
552 Huh. I thought he was getting axed. 1.3188 0.05141 138 104 24 10
553 It’s all yours if you can pull it off. 1.3188 0.04823 138 101 30 7
554 ...and that hero will finally unite Accounts Payable and Accounts Receivable. 1.3188 0.05141 138 104 24 10
555 ...because everyone has a degree now, we had to come up with a more creative recruiting technique. 1.3188 0.05037 138 103 26 9
556 I guess asking for a raise is out of the question now. 1.3188 0.05243 138 105 22 11
557 Yes. This is Arthur's office. Lancelot is in the next room. They share the same secretary. Her name is Guinevere. 1.3188 0.05243 138 105 22 11
558 I was expecting a pen. 1.3188 0.05343 138 106 20 12
559 We never imagined that it would take so long to find a successor to Warren Buffett. 1.3185 0.04778 135 98 31 6
560 So anyway, that's why the conference room table is round. 1.3185 0.04291 135 94 39 2
561 This is where we interview for the knight shift. 1.3185 0.04893 135 99 29 7
562 Pulling that out is one thing, pulling us out of our second quarter tailspin is another. 1.3185 0.04893 135 99 29 7
563 Our CEO Arthur King. Dyslexic, not ironic. 1.3185 0.04661 135 97 33 5
564 "It's the President's letter opener. We've convinced him it's his hands that are tiny". 1.3185 0.05428 135 104 19 12
565 And they all said it was a waste of time to major in English. 1.3185 0.04893 135 99 29 7
566 …and the legends say whosoever pulls the sword from the desk shall be compensated with a long-term incentive plan, access to the company jet, untold restricted stock, and a buttload of cash. 1.3185 0.05004 135 100 27 8
567 ... and all our conference rooms have round tables. 1.3185 0.04661 135 97 33 5
568 Sorry, Arthur called dibs on this desk 1.3185 0.04893 135 99 29 7
569 Oh, I thought he had been axed... 1.3185 0.04893 135 99 29 7
570 No, this is the office of Rex Caliber, why? 1.3185 0.04291 135 94 39 2
571 Poor Bill, he honestly thought that the pen was mightier than the sword 1.3185 0.04893 135 99 29 7
572 No, I don't think anyone's tried WD-40 yet. 1.3185 0.05114 135 101 25 9
573 Six month ago, he slid the sword back in, said something about Merlin and a bucket list, and hasn't been seen since. 1.3185 0.04778 135 98 31 6
574 I guess the Barbarians got past the gate. 1.3185 0.05004 135 100 27 8
575 It speeds up the interview process 1.3185 0.05114 135 101 25 9
576 This beats an expensive CEO interview process. 1.3185 0.04778 135 98 31 6
577 I don't see the point. 1.3185 0.04893 135 99 29 7
578 And this is Meghan Markle's old desk. 1.3185 0.05221 135 102 23 10
579 I wouldn't have bothered with an MBA if I knew this was how they picked new CEOs. 1.3185 0.05529 135 105 17 13
580 Sure, but how did they get a desk made of solid stone to the 61st floor? 1.3185 0.04893 135 99 29 7
581 Not to be petty, but the sword in my desk is bigger. 1.3185 0.05004 135 100 27 8
582 Here in the Oval Office it means he is not the sharpest “blade” in the drawer, doesn’t have a “handle” on what he does, has lost his “edge” completely and lies to the “hilt”. 1.3185 0.05114 135 101 25 9
583 Your wife stopped by while you were at lunch with your secretary. 1.3185 0.05221 135 102 23 10
584 This is Arthur King's office. 1.3185 0.05004 135 100 27 8
585 We're promoting you to medieval management. 1.3185 0.05114 135 101 25 9
586 Consider yourself lucky. It used to be a stone. 1.3185 0.04778 135 98 31 6
587 Not sure what it means, but I'll take a stab at it. 1.3185 0.04893 135 99 29 7
588 Whoever can pull it out gets the platinum health care plan. 1.3182 0.05081 132 98 26 8
589 At least it's not hanging over my head anymore 1.3165 0.05006 139 104 26 9
590 It’s been like that since the Camelot merger 1.3162 0.05081 136 102 25 9
591 Can you believe it? He gets his 23andMe back and all the sudden he thinks he's King Arthur. 1.3162 0.05081 136 102 25 9
592 His letter opener was legendary. 1.3162 0.04862 136 100 29 7
593 It's true that this is how the company selects its CEO, but we also use it for birthday cake. 1.3162 0.05081 136 102 25 9
594 Pendragon made sure that taking his place as CEO wasn't going to be easy. 1.3162 0.04973 136 101 27 8
595 We'd meant it as a metaphor. 1.3162 0.04633 136 98 33 5
596 With all the budget cuts, they cant afford an axe anymore. 1.3162 0.04973 136 101 27 8
597 Forever vacant. This is the office of the Vice President for Corporate Ethics. 1.3162 0.04973 136 101 27 8
598 I know its a little unorthodox, but you would be amazed how much search firms are charging. 1.3162 0.04749 136 99 31 6
599 And now for the final step in your CEO interview process. 1.3162 0.05081 136 102 25 9
600 Damocles must be on a coffee break. 1.3162 0.05081 136 102 25 9
601 We’re still adjusting to the hostile takeover. 1.3158 0.04318 133 93 38 2
602 They say who ever can pull the sword from the desk, gets to die rich and miserable. 1.3139 0.05359 137 106 19 12
603 Pull it out and you're hired. 1.3139 0.05049 137 103 25 9
604 HR doesn't like it but we find it really weeds out the losers. 1.3139 0.04832 137 101 29 7
605 Just wait till they see how big your pen is. 1.3139 0.05258 137 105 21 11
606 At least we're not getting the axe. 1.3139 0.04365 137 97 37 3
607 Your predecessor was a fool for mixed metaphors. 1.3134 0.04903 134 99 28 7
608 No, YOU look underneath. 1.3134 0.04903 134 99 28 7
609 Well, it was bound to happen. He fell by the sword. 1.3134 0.05126 134 101 24 9
610 Legend has it that he who removes the sword from the desk, will achieve modest growth in the fourth quarter using a combined strategy of targeted investmentent and fiscal restraint. 1.3134 0.05235 134 102 22 10
611 If you can pull that out, Arthur, you won't need stock options. 1.3134 0.05235 134 102 22 10
612 So, there's just one last thing in our CEO interview process... 1.3134 0.04903 134 99 28 7
613 You asked: 'What must one do around here to get the corner office?' 1.3134 0.05235 134 102 22 10
614 It's tough to replace a man of that Excalibur. 1.3134 0.05341 134 103 20 11
615 ... and for nights, we use a round table. 1.3106 0.05392 132 102 19 11
616 Looks like the C.E.O. position is still open. 1.3106 0.05283 132 101 21 10
617 It's to open mail from North Korea. 1.3106 0.05283 132 101 21 10
618 ...I didn’t even mean to click Reply All. 1.3106 0.05283 132 101 21 10
619 Have it off my desk by end of day. 1.3106 0.04451 132 94 35 3
620 Legend says whoever pulls the sword ends up holding a sword. 1.3106 0.05392 132 102 19 11
621 This is what happens when you try to engage in a round table discussion. 1.3106 0.05283 132 101 21 10
622 Push pins aren’t macho! 1.3106 0.05283 132 101 21 10
623 Obviously, the meeting didn't go well. 1.3106 0.04704 132 96 31 5
624 Hostile takeover indeed. 1.3095 0.05098 126 94 25 7
625 We have a unique severance package... 1.3088 0.05168 136 104 22 10
626 I thought you asked if I handle excel 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
627 It was supposed to be a letter opener, but the Selection Committee got carried away. 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
628 You know what to do, Arthur. 1.3071 0.05421 127 98 19 10
629 Go get Arthur. 1.3071 0.04938 127 94 27 6
630 You're welcome to try, but it's a lateral move 1.3066 0.04811 137 102 28 7
631 He ran out hollering for his horse... 1.3053 0.05185 131 100 22 9
632 Your resume means nothing. 1.3053 0.04833 131 97 28 6
633 Pulling it out's easy. Walking up Broadway with it is the hard part. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
634 He’s hoping someone will pull it out, so he can retire. 1.3047 0.04648 128 93 31 4
635 Sometimes a surgeon should stay a surgeon. 1.3047 0.04905 128 95 27 6
636 Looks like Marketing has thrown down the gauntlet to Finance! 1.3047 0.05029 128 96 25 7
637 Our interviews are a little...old-fashioned. 1.3047 0.04514 128 92 33 3
638 Filling this position has been a nightmare for HR. 1.3047 0.04514 128 92 33 3
639 The search criteria is medieval, but the comp package is fit for a king. 1.3043 0.05683 115 89 17 9
640 In lieu of an interview, we have developed a pracitcum. 1.3040 0.04980 125 93 26 6
641 I suppose I should have warned him that Melania was dropping in. 1.3040 0.05355 125 96 20 9
642 At least it’s not set in stone 1.3040 0.05233 125 95 22 8
643 No one uses a pen anymore. 1.3040 0.05474 125 97 18 10
644 Trump thinks it's rigged. 1.3040 0.05233 125 95 22 8
645 If you think that's impressive, you should see his pen. 1.3040 0.05474 125 97 18 10
646 We're convinced the new CEO will come in our lifetime. The office pool is up to $436. 1.3040 0.05591 125 98 16 11
647 The last guy who had this office was pretty legendary. 1.3040 0.04849 125 92 28 5
648 He did that after his request for a round table got denied. 1.3040 0.04284 125 88 36 1
649 Since Tillerson left no one’s even bothered to try. 1.3040 0.04714 125 91 30 4
650 No one has pulled it out yet, but we've had four worker's comp claims from people who tried. 1.3040 0.05233 125 95 22 8
651 Yeah, Mick just scribbled a sharpie all over the office, including the bottom of the door for God knows what reason, called it shading and insisted he was a good enough artist to be published in The New Yorker. This city will mess you up. 1.3016 0.05073 126 95 24 7
652 They'll never find another man of his excalibur. 1.3016 0.04947 126 94 26 6
653 I was wondering if we have a smaller letter opener in the supply room. 1.3016 0.04947 126 94 26 6
654 He wasn’t really cut out for a desk jab. 1.3016 0.04947 126 94 26 6
655 Well, the ex CEO just wasn't the right caliber. 1.3016 0.05197 126 96 22 8
656 A regular letter opener would be fine. 1.3016 0.04683 126 92 30 4
657 I get it...i'm difficult... 1.3016 0.05073 126 95 24 7
658 If you can pull it out you'll be able to slide that laptop over. 1.3016 0.05318 126 97 20 9
659 Be careful...the last guy that applied for the job threw his back out. 1.3008 0.05155 123 93 23 7
660 We're looking for someone who can cut through the red tape. 1.3008 0.05024 123 92 25 6
661 I was going to take a stab at that promotion. Looks like the other guy beat me to it! 1.3008 0.05155 123 93 23 7
662 It glows when politicians and lobbyists are nearby. 1.3008 0.05282 123 94 21 8
663 here we believe that the sword is much mightier than the pen 1.3008 0.05155 123 93 23 7
664 Funny story. The last guy would fire people by email and then hide under his desk. 1.3008 0.05529 123 96 17 10
665 Last time I saw him he was mumbling something about a lady and a lake. 1.3000 0.05239 120 91 22 7
666 We don't ask much here at Galahad, Arthur and Merlin. 1.3000 0.04674 120 87 30 3
667 The Lady in the Lake is our largest shareholder. 1.2984 0.05245 124 95 21 8
668 It's not our fault women just don't have the upper body strength to be CEO. 1.2984 0.04989 124 93 25 6
669 Late 14th century, probably Teutonic, not original to the desk. 1.2984 0.05119 124 94 23 7
670 Okay, well that explains why he ordered a round table for the boardroom. 1.2984 0.05119 124 94 23 7
671 I think he misunderstood me when I said we need to execute the contract. 1.2984 0.05119 124 94 23 7
672 There's only one interview question, but it's a tough one. 1.2984 0.05489 124 97 17 10
673 References, smeferences; removeth this sword and the job is yours. 1.2984 0.04989 124 93 25 6
674 The rest of my team got the axe. 1.2984 0.05119 124 94 23 7
675 The only one who's been able to lift it is the cleaning lady. 1.2984 0.05608 124 98 15 11
676 There are some risks with the job. 1.2984 0.04856 124 92 27 5
677 Whatever you do, don't pull it out before the Boss does. 1.2984 0.05608 124 98 15 11
678 That letter opener was given to him by his great grandfather. 1.2984 0.04989 124 93 25 6
679 The moment Bob realized he had been promoted beyond his level of competence. 1.2984 0.05119 124 94 23 7
680 Another day, another hostile take over. 1.2984 0.04989 124 93 25 6
681 The pen lost this one. 1.2984 0.04856 124 92 27 5
682 The hard part is keeping it out of your back. 1.2984 0.05119 124 94 23 7
683 He never loses a memo. 1.2984 0.05369 124 96 19 9
684 You will need to be explicit when discussing severance. 1.2984 0.05119 124 94 23 7
685 They call it Executive Caliber 1.2984 0.05119 124 94 23 7
686 He must be serious; I thought the gauntlet thing was just a joke 1.2984 0.05369 124 96 19 9
687 We’re still in the Middle Ages when it comes to succession planning. 1.2984 0.05245 124 95 21 8
688 We use it to vet cpas. If you can slay a dragon, you can cook the books. 1.2984 0.05489 124 97 17 10
689 We couldn't pull it out, so we just built the office around it. 1.2984 0.05369 124 96 19 9
690 So that’s why we got a round table in the conference room. 1.2984 0.04989 124 93 25 6
691 I'd like to see a pen do that... 1.2984 0.05369 124 96 19 9
692 It's not that metaphysical. You just push it forward, and the drawer opens. 1.2975 0.05333 121 93 20 8
693 Monday. 1.2975 0.05333 121 93 20 8
694 She tends to work the knight shift. 1.2975 0.05707 121 96 14 11
695 I told you to give him the ax. 1.2975 0.05333 121 93 20 8
696 Whoever pulls it out gets the corner office.... 1.2975 0.04930 121 90 26 5
697 The hard part was getting it out of the VP's back. 1.2975 0.05333 121 93 20 8
698 It's better than being stabbed in the back. 1.2975 0.04642 121 88 30 3
699 The meeting must be in the war room. 1.2975 0.04335 121 86 34 1
700 I say we leave it. 1.2975 0.05333 121 93 20 8
701 Wasn't your computer tech guy working under there? 1.2975 0.05460 121 94 18 9
702 The assertiveness training needs to be turned down an notch. 1.2975 0.04788 121 89 28 4
703 Honestly, I clicked “Upgrade Excel” not “Upgrade Excalibur” 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
704 I think somebody wants my job. 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
705 Guess what ? We have to slash the budget again! 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
706 I liked it better when he just drew a line in the sand. 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
707 As the legend goes, only someone with honor, decency, and inner strength can remove the sword and be crowned CEO...... but we only recruit MBAs. 1.2975 0.04930 121 90 26 5
708 Bob is out with a stabbing headache. 1.2975 0.05585 121 95 16 10
709 We need somebody with some real pull. 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
710 Whoever can remove it gets to rule all of the Research Division. It's called Excalibrator. 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
711 I told you this would happen- the guy is a level twelve D&D warlock. His name is Mind Flayer for God's sake and you parked in his spot. 1.2975 0.05460 121 94 18 9
712 Just checking...you did ask them install 'Word' on my desktop? 1.2975 0.05068 121 91 24 6
713 The ironic thing is it's a bulletproof desk. 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
714 Forget it, Artie. The CEO and a dozen executive vice presidents have already tried to pull it out. That thing isn't going anywhere. 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
715 Well that explains why the conference table is round 1.2975 0.05460 121 94 18 9
716 Better watch your knees. 1.2975 0.04788 121 89 28 4
717 Apparently, he who lives by the sword gets fired by the sword. 1.2975 0.05460 121 94 18 9
718 You go first. 1.2975 0.05460 121 94 18 9
719 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is right wise upper-management born. 1.2975 0.05202 121 92 22 7
720 They fired Arthur last week, so you'll just have to work around it. 1.2975 0.04930 121 90 26 5
721 The last step in our interview process is...unconventional. 1.2975 0.04788 121 89 28 4
722 Whoever pulls the sword from the desk becomes CEO of Enron. 1.2966 0.05150 118 89 23 6
723 Camelot or Spam-a-lot , choose wisely ! 1.2960 0.04547 125 91 31 3
724 And wait till you see the letter they expect you to open. 1.2951 0.04895 122 91 26 5
725 We shall answer our readers the day the letter opener is finally pulled... 1.2951 0.04895 122 91 26 5
726 Possibly a little better than getting axed. 1.2951 0.05032 122 92 24 6
727 Guess he's binge watching Game Of Thrones again. 1.2951 0.05294 122 94 20 8
728 I'll be candid. We've had some trouble filling this position. 1.2951 0.05032 122 92 24 6
729 Whoever pulls it out is the new CEO 1.2941 0.05250 119 91 21 7
730 Many have failed, Mr. Arthur, but to become CEO ... 1.2941 0.05113 119 90 23 6
731 This time its electrified. 1.2941 0.05113 119 90 23 6
732 So few people aspire to middle management. 1.2941 0.04971 119 89 25 5
733 Arthur, it's worth a try. 1.2941 0.05250 119 91 21 7
734 I remember when we just used to send pink slips. 1.2941 0.05250 119 91 21 7
735 Don't trust him, he's a deskstabber. 1.2941 0.04826 119 88 27 4
736 Your desk includes a letter opener. 1.2941 0.04971 119 89 25 5
737 That's nothing. You should see Google's employment test. 1.2941 0.04971 119 89 25 5
738 I hope you don't mind working knights. 1.2941 0.05515 119 93 17 9
739 It's a fake. That desk isn't stone. 1.2941 0.05250 119 91 21 7
740 Your new office comes with cutting edge technology. 1.2941 0.05642 119 94 15 10
741 Well, Art, you can probably guess why we came directly to you. 1.2941 0.04971 119 89 25 5
742 We're hoping to get an editor a bit more grounded in the Classics. 1.2941 0.05250 119 91 21 7
743 In my day you got the axe. Those millennials just can't leave well enough alone. 1.2941 0.05113 119 90 23 6
744 I am out of the office and will have limited access to chain mail. 1.2941 0.05113 119 90 23 6
745 Looks like a definite no on that caption you submitted to the New Yorker. 1.2941 0.05384 119 92 19 8
746 We should probably call Arthur from Maintenance... 1.2931 0.04900 116 86 26 4
747 They say whoever pulls it out gets promoted to CEO. 1.2931 0.05613 116 91 16 9
748 The competition begins for the next CEO of King Arthur Flour. 1.2927 0.05504 123 97 16 10
749 Your tests and interviews went well, but the physical will be decisive. 1.2927 0.04997 123 93 24 6
750 Well, Art, this is your chance to rule all of accounting. 1.2927 0.05382 123 96 18 9
751 Legend has it that HR got tired of evaluating resumes. 1.2927 0.05257 123 95 20 8
752 Mr. Klemp is unavailable due to a hernia strain. 1.2927 0.04579 123 90 30 3
753 This IS the interview. 1.2927 0.04861 123 92 26 5
754 The partnership track at this firm is positively medieval. 1.2917 0.04644 120 88 29 3
755 Not again... 1.2917 0.04792 120 89 27 4
756 We've had the hardest time finding qualified candidates. 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
757 Technology is always a double edged sword. 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
758 We had to cut him. 1.2906 0.05702 117 93 14 10
759 Even if you can only get it a little way out you still might get an internship. 1.2906 0.05300 117 90 20 7
760 It's this way, Arthur. Our CEOs are selected on the basis of divine right? 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
761 This used to be Damocles' office. 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
762 I guess Arthur retired. 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
763 They missed 1.2906 0.05014 117 88 24 5
764 We only have one interview question... 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
765 The sword? Oh, that's the easy part. If you want the job, you also have to clear out the inbox and voicemail. 1.2906 0.04711 117 86 28 3
766 We do offer a fast track to upper management. 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
767 alas, a mixed metaphor written in stone 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
768 It's as good a method as any for choosing the new CEO... 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
769 Get Arthur in here. 1.2906 0.05300 117 90 20 7
770 It certainly has discouraged people from asking for raises, but I can’t open my middle drawer any more. 1.2906 0.05571 117 92 16 9
771 Looks like a double edged sword to me. 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
772 A takeovers will require leverage. 1.2906 0.05300 117 90 20 7
773 It's cheap and equally as effective as our prior recruitment methods. 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
774 On second thought, maybe we should just ask the applicants about their strengths and weaknesses. 1.2906 0.05300 117 90 20 7
775 HR doesn't approve. 1.2906 0.05300 117 90 20 7
776 It's not the holy grail, but you can work your way up. 1.2906 0.04711 117 86 28 3
777 Whosoever pulls the sword from the desk gets to be CEO, explain our last quarterly results, overcome the shareholder hordes at our upcoming annual meeting, and fight off the circling private equity vultures. 1.2906 0.05014 117 88 24 5
778 Mankoff’s old office. He left this, and a note ‘How about sever? Does sever work for you?’ 1.2906 0.05300 117 90 20 7
779 It's a great position, but we haven't found anyone who qualifies. 1.2906 0.04552 117 85 30 2
780 I wasn't awarded my own realm or anything, so I put it back. 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
781 It’s for when you have to work knights. 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
782 You've successfully made it through a dozen interviews. Now things get real. 1.2906 0.05571 117 92 16 9
783 Actually, the round table is in the conference room... 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
784 Sadly, his pen was not mightier. 1.2906 0.04865 117 87 26 4
785 Here's the office of our once and future CEO. 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
786 Excalibur? No, just an ostentatious letter opener. 1.2906 0.05014 117 88 24 5
787 Don't complain. My Secret Santa gift was a kitty cat coffee mug... 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
788 Most people leave a business card. 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
789 I love it, but I think the placement is all wrong. 1.2906 0.04865 117 87 26 4
790 That’s going to leave a mark. 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
791 This cuts down on the interview process 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
792 What would you think of a round desk with a few more chairs? 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
793 The legend says whoever can pull out the sword is the one true Regional Sales VP - Midwest Division. 1.2903 0.04828 124 93 26 5
794 Unfortunately, Arthur's skill set was narrower than we had anticipated. 1.2903 0.04548 124 91 30 3
795 It's tough. You have to pull out the sword AND figure out his password. 1.2903 0.05465 124 98 16 10
796 That's the lever that sets the thermostat for the entire floor. 1.2903 0.05343 124 97 18 9
797 Hostile takeover. 1.2903 0.04402 124 90 32 2
798 Holy Grail no. A view of Central Park, yes. 1.2903 0.05583 124 99 14 11
799 It's an exact replica of the one Obama left in the Oval office. 1.2903 0.05092 124 95 22 7
800 Yours leans a little to the left too, huh? 1.2903 0.05465 124 98 16 10
801 Looks like more cuts are coming. 1.2903 0.05219 124 96 20 8
802 I called the British Embassy, but they don't know how to get it out either 1.2903 0.05343 124 97 18 9
803 Probably not the best day to ask him for a raise. 1.2897 0.05635 107 83 17 7
804 The president has a rather exalted view of his position 1.2893 0.05040 121 92 23 6
805 HR is trying out a new selection process. 1.2883 0.05181 111 84 22 5
806 Couldn't even fall on his own sword. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
807 This is going to be one tough interview. 1.2870 0.05762 115 92 13 10
808 Remember when I told you that the job comes with challenges? 1.2870 0.05491 115 90 17 8
809 Surprisingly it was the PowerPoint that killed him. 1.2870 0.05491 115 90 17 8
810 The letter opener comes from Texas. 1.2870 0.05762 115 92 13 10
811 You asked if this firm is “old school”? I would say, “Medieval!” 1.2870 0.04904 115 86 25 4
812 That's for opening letters from Kim Jong-Un. 1.2870 0.05628 115 91 15 9
813 Legend has it that whoever can remove the sword can pardon himself for all past and future crimes. 1.2870 0.05057 115 87 23 5
814 Remove the sword and this corner office with a view is yours, Partner! 1.2870 0.05206 115 88 21 6
815 The last guy said it was a letter opener. 1.2870 0.04904 115 86 25 4
816 After the Mueller Report, the Special Prosecutor’s office was returned to its original condition. 1.2870 0.05491 115 90 17 8
817 You need an MBA too. 1.2870 0.05206 115 88 21 6
818 It's to open his paycheck. 1.2870 0.05762 115 92 13 10
819 Arthur has a unique password system. 1.2870 0.05350 115 89 19 7
820 This is the toughest part of the interview. 1.2870 0.05206 115 88 21 6
821 I told you he didn't get the ax. 1.2870 0.05350 115 89 19 7
822 Pull the sword and you never have to deal with another email about privacy policy. 1.2870 0.05491 115 90 17 8
823 Just one more test, Art, and the window office is yours. 1.2870 0.04746 115 85 27 3
824 Our succession plan is legendary. 1.2870 0.05350 115 89 19 7
825 I'd hate to see what his pen looks like. 1.2870 0.05350 115 89 19 7
826 The top drawer sticks 1.2870 0.05057 115 87 23 5
827 Before we promote you to department head Arthur, you will need to successfully complete one final task ... 1.2870 0.05350 115 89 19 7
828 Whoever can remove it will rule H.R. 1.2870 0.04904 115 86 25 4
829 No, you don’t get to rule Britain, but you will be able to use the desk. 1.2870 0.05057 115 87 23 5
830 Turns out you don't have to be worthy or even qualified. Welcome to D.C. 1.2870 0.05350 115 89 19 7
831 It started off as a joke, but no one thought it was funny. Now it's just stuck in there. 1.2870 0.05206 115 88 21 6
832 Merlin in Human Resources suggested we skip the job interview 1.2870 0.05350 115 89 19 7
833 At least he took a stab at it. 1.2870 0.05350 115 89 19 7
834 The Request was for a letter opener 1.2870 0.05350 115 89 19 7
835 So Arthur, welcome to the job interview. 1.2870 0.05762 115 92 13 10
836 Pulling it out is the easy part. Cutting the red tape with it is another matter. 1.2870 0.05057 115 87 23 5
837 This is what you need to slay the wolf of wall street. 1.2870 0.05206 115 88 21 6
838 I really don’t see the point. 1.2870 0.05491 115 90 17 8
839 We’ve upgraded our method for screening hires 1.2870 0.05057 115 87 23 5
840 Our CEO search committee may need some new blood. 1.2870 0.05057 115 87 23 5
841 His alternative was to fall on it. 1.2870 0.05491 115 90 17 8
842 And the round table is in the conference room. 1.2870 0.05206 115 88 21 6
843 Your other option is the office with a smart phone. 1.2857 0.04472 112 81 30 1
844 Your interview’s gone well today, Artie. There’s just one last thing ... 1.2857 0.04472 112 81 30 1
845 See Gary, I told you the new boss was incredibly sharp. 1.2845 0.04550 116 85 29 2
846 It's almost as if no one wants to be in charge of our sexual harassment training. 1.2845 0.05449 116 91 17 8
847 Just another side effect of working knights. 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
848 What did you expect from the King Arthur Flour Company for prospective CEO's ? 1.2844 0.04716 109 80 27 2
849 No, it slides right out, but then you're immediately under indictment. 1.2832 0.05102 113 86 22 5
850 Next time you might try a fly swatter. 1.2832 0.05402 113 88 18 7
851 I thought the pen was mightier. 1.2832 0.05547 113 89 16 8
852 We paid McKinsey a million dollars for a succession strategy. This was their suggestion. 1.2832 0.05254 113 87 20 6
853 It’s really not hard to pull out, but the company is in receivership. 1.2832 0.05254 113 87 20 6
854 The company declined his request for a standing desk. 1.2832 0.05547 113 89 16 8
855 It's going to be hard to find someone of his Excalibur! 1.2832 0.05402 113 88 18 7
856 This might be why James manspreads in the conference room. 1.2832 0.05825 113 91 12 10
857 Merlin, down in HR, thought we should give it a try. 1.2832 0.04944 113 85 24 4
858 Told you they'd never axe him. 1.2832 0.05402 113 88 18 7
859 Damocles works from home on Wednesdays. 1.2832 0.05102 113 86 22 5
860 So, Arthur, tell me why you think you'd be a good fit to lead our company. 1.2832 0.04944 113 85 24 4
861 He called it a 'Texas letter opener". 1.2832 0.04782 113 84 26 3
862 THERE’s my letter opener! 1.2832 0.05102 113 86 22 5
863 I believe it's his way of saying "I quit." 1.2832 0.05254 113 87 20 6
864 Sorry, no, this doesn't count as password protected. 1.2832 0.05547 113 89 16 8
865 Go on, give it a stab. 1.2832 0.05402 113 88 18 7
866 They’re still looking for someone of the right caliber... 1.2832 0.05547 113 89 16 8
867 ...and if you can remove THAT you'll get a key to the executive washroom! 1.2832 0.04944 113 85 24 4
868 Our corporate culture has always taken a dim view of backstabbing. 1.2832 0.05102 113 86 22 5
869 This is the final part of the application process. 1.2832 0.05102 113 86 22 5
870 Whoso pulleth the sword shall middle-manageth the Human Resources. 1.2832 0.05402 113 88 18 7
871 Arthur? Guinevere? 1.2832 0.05102 113 86 22 5
872 It’s how we will know the one true HR manager. 1.2832 0.05402 113 88 18 7
873 Yeah, except whoever pulls it out has to fix the desk. 1.2832 0.05687 113 90 14 9
874 Makes a change from being stabbed in the back 1.2832 0.05402 113 88 18 7
875 Arthur thought this new job might not be set in stone. 1.2832 0.05402 113 88 18 7
876 Interesting power point. 1.2832 0.05402 113 88 18 7
877 The pen may be mightier but this one has wifi controls and an app. 1.2832 0.05254 113 87 20 6
878 The Once and Future C.E.O. 1.2832 0.05402 113 88 18 7
879 Yes, that's correct. Then we hang it above your chair by a thread. 1.2832 0.05547 113 89 16 8
880 Mr. Buffet said it has something to do with who his successor will be. 1.2832 0.04782 113 84 26 3
881 This is how we do succession planning. 1.2818 0.04499 110 80 29 1
882 It’s to open the letter Trump got from Kim Jung Un. 1.2818 0.05500 110 86 17 7
883 I told you they'd give Arthur this office. 1.2818 0.05500 110 86 17 7
884 The axe must be out for sharpening 1.2818 0.05187 110 84 21 5
885 Christ, what an asshole. 1.2818 0.05649 110 87 15 8
886 This is what happens when you binge watch Suits and Game of Thrones in the same weekend. 1.2818 0.05024 110 83 23 4
887 You should see the suit he wears to work. 1.2818 0.05500 110 86 17 7
888 We had to do that after the last guy fell on his. 1.2818 0.05187 110 84 21 5
889 I don't know, but do you think maybe your wife knows your cheating on her? 1.2818 0.05346 110 85 19 6
890 You'll be working very late knights here. 1.2818 0.05187 110 84 21 5
891 This looks like a classic desk job. 1.2818 0.05649 110 87 15 8
892 This is where we negotiate contracts with our teachers 1.2818 0.05187 110 84 21 5
893 He either has a King Arthur complex or that’s one hell of a letter opener. 1.2818 0.05500 110 86 17 7
894 Looks like I didn't get the ax, but I'm not sure what this means 1.2818 0.05500 110 86 17 7
895 It's a family company, and the old man REALLY doesn't want to retire. 1.2818 0.05500 110 86 17 7
896 So, you’ve been having issues with your desktop wizard? 1.2818 0.05500 110 86 17 7
897 So it really is true that The New Yorker has preserved E. B. White's desk. 1.2818 0.05187 110 84 21 5
898 Wow, a sword? You're quite lucky. The last two guys got the axe! 1.2818 0.05187 110 84 21 5
899 They say whoever pulls the sword out is the rightful owner to the unclaimed lunch in the corporate fridge. 1.2816 0.04862 103 76 25 2
900 This is a cutthroat industry! 1.2807 0.05361 114 89 18 7
901 Whosoever can remove the sword shall receive a defined benefit pension plan 1.2807 0.05361 114 89 18 7
902 I think he was expecting a round table. 1.2793 0.05147 111 85 21 5
903 Whoever can pull it out will become the next President. It's a two-edged sword. 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
904 The short version is that he expressed that pen being mightier crap once too often. 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
905 Fred, we're giving you Damocles' office. He won't be back. 1.2793 0.05748 111 89 13 9
906 ...but the downside is, your wife will cheat on you with Lance from mergers & acquisitions. 1.2793 0.04985 111 84 23 4
907 Note to self: Don’t hide under desk. 1.2793 0.05604 111 88 15 8
908 King Arthur contemplates the usefulness of his MBA. 1.2793 0.05303 111 86 19 6
909 Now show me if you have exec caliber. 1.2793 0.05147 111 85 21 5
910 It's the best the search committee could come up with. 1.2793 0.05303 111 86 19 6
911 Actually no one has tried. The job really sucks. 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
912 So, Mr. Damocles finally retired after all these years. 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
913 We got tired of reading resumes and scheduling interviews. 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
914 .”..and you’ve met Guinevere in accounting?” 1.2793 0.05147 111 85 21 5
915 Have you tried pulling it out and putting it back in again? 1.2793 0.05604 111 88 15 8
916 If you can pull it out, you get health and dental. 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
917 Oh that thing. It was put there by the Lady of the Lake Placid Branch and no one can get it out. 1.2793 0.05748 111 89 13 9
918 That's how you sign a resignation letter. 1.2793 0.05147 111 85 21 5
919 If you can pull it out, we make you CEO until someone stabs you in the back with it. 1.2793 0.04465 111 81 29 1
920 If you can remove the sword, the job is yours. 1.2793 0.05748 111 89 13 9
921 Yeah, Arthur decided to go on a sabbatical. They haven’t found a good replacement yet. 1.2793 0.05303 111 86 19 6
922 I told you they were changing the password recovery protocol. 1.2793 0.05748 111 89 13 9
923 We’re fairly certain this isn’t Russian collusion, but the British may be involved. 1.2793 0.05604 111 88 15 8
924 The last guy was a bit of a legend. 1.2793 0.04985 111 84 23 4
925 Yes, I have to agree, the sword is mightier than the laptop. 1.2793 0.05604 111 88 15 8
926 Just pull it out and you’re CEO. 1.2793 0.05889 111 90 11 10
927 I told him that casual weapons day was a bad idea. 1.2793 0.05303 111 86 19 6
928 We're still on a quest to find a qualified applicant. 1.2793 0.04818 111 83 25 3
929 They say this executive recruiter is a wizard. 1.2793 0.05303 111 86 19 6
930 If you do get it out, your work-life balance is pretty much shot. 1.2793 0.05303 111 86 19 6
931 In addition, there are the standard dragons to slay, princesses to awaken, plus amortized capital depreciations to calculate. 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
932 Nuh-uh, Damocles, not Arthur. The crew will reset the sword before you move in. 1.2793 0.04818 111 83 25 3
933 Of course the monarchy doesn't have any real power anymore, but you would get a nice corner office. 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
934 The last guy couldn't cut it. 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
935 So, you said your name was Arthur? 1.2793 0.05147 111 85 21 5
936 I think Arthur may be taking his new job a little too seriously 1.2793 0.04985 111 84 23 4
937 Remove it, Arthur, and you get my job…although, it's not set in stone. 1.2793 0.04818 111 83 25 3
938 Whoso pulleth out this sword from the desk is rightwise managing partner. 1.2793 0.05604 111 88 15 8
939 I guess we were wrong all along. The sword is mightier than the pen. 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
940 Listen up, Art. I knew Arthur, and you're no Arthur. 1.2793 0.05748 111 89 13 9
941 It was the CEO Search Committee's idea. 1.2793 0.05303 111 86 19 6
942 Yes, our boardroom table is round. Why do you ask? 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
943 The interview process has really gotten tougher. 1.2793 0.05303 111 86 19 6
944 Actually, the sword is mightier than the pen! 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
945 Subtle 1.2793 0.05456 111 87 17 7
946 Why don’t you give it a try, son, while Arthur is getting the coffee? 1.2793 0.04985 111 84 23 4
947 Pulling out the sword is easy. Guessing the password is the real test. 1.2793 0.05303 111 86 19 6
948 This really simplifies the hiring process. 1.2793 0.05147 111 85 21 5
949 I hear you have pull. Show me. 1.2793 0.05147 111 85 21 5
950 I think the promotion has gone to Arthur’s head. 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
951 I still think Pink Slips work just as well. 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
952 Succession plan. 1.2783 0.05319 115 90 18 7
953 I thought the pen was mightier than the sword. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
954 He wasn't even planning on having a vasectomy. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
955 Our succession plan is legendary. 1.2778 0.04713 108 80 26 2
956 We're looking for a candidate with legendary problem solving skills. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
957 We can't make Arthur king, but here's his chance to be CEO! 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
958 It’s going to be hard to replace Arthur. 1.2778 0.04893 108 81 24 3
959 Stop dreaming, Arthur. You'll never run this company. 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
960 First office bris I've seen. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
961 Apparently the anger management course he took didn't help much. 1.2778 0.04893 108 81 24 3
962 They say his name was Damocles 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
963 Ah yes, the sword. Nobody knows how it got there, but it's Friday, so nobody really cares either. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
964 ...but if you want a corner office, you should really talk to the Lady of the Water Cooler. 1.2778 0.05859 108 87 12 9
965 Yesterday it was a dead fish. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
966 I guess the meeting is cancelled. 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
967 That old trick. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
968 Behold, the "Excaliburstorpen" desk from Ikea 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
969 It’s got to be better than the Electoral College 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
970 Looks like Arthur's trying to make a point again. 1.2778 0.04893 108 81 24 3
971 The sword's irrelevant; he already thinks he's king. 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
972 You should see where he keeps his pen. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
973 It’s much cheaper than hiring a search firm. 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
974 Only someone with a pure heart can pull it out. No one has even tried since the Internet was invented. 1.2778 0.05859 108 87 12 9
975 Other execs just throw in the towel. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
976 Remove it and you have a desk. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
977 He was encouraged to resign. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
978 I think that new guy Arthur may have a shot at it. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
979 It's connected to a live 220 socket. He likes to see people jump. 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
980 I guess Merlin quit again. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
981 This is the performance task part of the interview. 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
982 This is a bad sign for our bonuses 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
983 We're expecting big things from you, Arthur. 1.2778 0.06005 108 88 10 10
984 King would be a lateral move at best. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
985 Arthur must have scheduled another roundtable in the conference room. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
986 If you can pull it out you get the key to the executive bathroom. 1.2778 0.04713 108 80 26 2
987 It wasn't exactly the severance package he expected. 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
988 I thought the new boss was a hatchet man, but I guess this’ll work... 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
989 Here at Goldstein Circumcisions our motto is: "Think Big!" 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
990 I thought he got the axe? 1.2778 0.04893 108 81 24 3
991 It's even worse than being axed. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
992 You can't do that with a pen! 1.2778 0.04893 108 81 24 3
993 Here's your office Arthur. Good luck getting that out. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
994 It’s Trump’s new citizenship requirement. 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
995 Ready to become a legend? 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
996 Our new selection process is backed by a strong body of literature. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
997 ... And this room is where we manage headcount. 1.2778 0.06147 108 89 8 11
998 They say that whoever pulls the sword gets one extra personal day this year. 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
999 Either we pull it or there goes another $31,000 to replace Ben Carson's desk. 1.2768 0.05262 112 87 19 6
1000 Every new hire thinks they are the next Lancelot. 1.2762 0.04588 105 77 27 1
1001 What do we put in the job posting? 1.2762 0.04972 105 79 23 3
1002 His business motto is the art of the steel. 1.2762 0.04384 105 76 29 0
1003 Removing the sword entitles you to a parking space in the building. 1.2755 0.05762 98 77 15 6
1004 Live by the sword, die by the mid-year headcount rationalization 1.2755 0.05385 98 75 19 4
1005 Just as I suspected--somebody's been opening my mail. 1.2752 0.05027 109 83 22 4
1006 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is rightwise awarded the key to the Executive Washroom. 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1007 Looks like Mr. Damocles is still out. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1008 Pick your myth: Arthurian or Damoclean? 1.2736 0.05771 106 85 13 8
1009 Try yanking it out and see what happens. 1.2736 0.04746 106 79 25 2
1010 I guess the sword is mightier than the pen 1.2736 0.04746 106 79 25 2
1011 Tough situation. Would you like to take a stab at it? 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1012 I’ll try Arthur in IT. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1013 We find it takes the guesswork out of selecting a new CEO. 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1014 Wow. I thought "they're gonna get medieval on your ass" was metaphorical. 1.2736 0.05771 106 85 13 8
1015 Prophecy tells of a young Wharton graduate. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1016 This is Arthur's office, he's been slaying it. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1017 The knight shift isn't for everyone. 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1018 I only wish we could choose our U.S. President this way. 1.2736 0.05771 106 85 13 8
1019 Our CEO vetting process is somewhat dated. 1.2736 0.04931 106 80 23 3
1020 But you cannot stand on the desk. 1.2736 0.04931 106 80 23 3
1021 Do you think it's too subtle? 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1022 And here's where we separate the job applicants from the qualified employees. 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1023 We wait for a hero who will slay bureaucracy. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1024 I was wondering where I'd left my sword. 1.2736 0.05771 106 85 13 8
1025 We here at Excalibur LLC like to hold on to our traditions 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1026 Our CEO has begun succession planning. 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1027 Any concerns, just let me know. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1028 He vowed to fall on his sword if the company went bankrupt but then he grabbed his golden parachute and has not been seen since. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1029 He Never Saw it Coming. 1.2736 0.04931 106 80 23 3
1030 Actually, he got the ax. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1031 This position has some unique requirements. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1032 I critiqued his first draft and he said he'd take another stab at it... 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1033 I know the pen is mightier, but I needed to make a point. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1034 He said no one else could use his letter opener. 1.2736 0.04931 106 80 23 3
1035 Actually, it was placed by his wife while he was having sex on the desk. 1.2736 0.05771 106 85 13 8
1036 The last person to pull it out stuck it back in and left after just 4 days. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1037 I never thought I’d say this, but I guess it’s a good thing he’s never at his desk. 1.2736 0.04931 106 80 23 3
1038 Arthur always had a flare for the dramatic. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1039 Hilt to the left means he’s getting coffee. 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1040 Somehow, "The Sword in the Desk" doesn't have that mythic ring. 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
1041 We should have gotten him the round table. 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
1042 You go first. 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
1043 So far no one has been able to replace him. 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
1044 Pulling it out is the easy part. Cutting the red tape with it is something else again! 1.2718 0.05012 103 78 22 3
1045 Thank you for coming in. We've been trying to fill this position for ages. 1.2718 0.05012 103 78 22 3
1046 I'm not sure Myers Briggs captures her personality type. 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
1047 We decided that strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a corporate structure. 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
1048 You called him 'Garfield' 1.2718 0.05721 103 82 14 7
1049 The IT guys call it “rightful heir recognition technology.” 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
1050 That's not a round table. 1.2718 0.04818 103 77 24 2
1051 The next candidate will arrive shortly. His name is King. Arthur King. He claims he's good with swords. 1.2718 0.04616 103 76 26 1
1052 That's the key to the executive washroom. 1.2718 0.05012 103 78 22 3
1053 Not me. You pull it. 1.2718 0.05885 103 83 12 8
1054 I guess the rumors of a hostile takeover are true. 1.2718 0.05721 103 82 14 7
1055 The consolation prize is full medical for your hernia 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
1056 You know Arthur, sometimes The Sword In The Desk is just a sword in a desk. 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
1057 Buy on myth, sell on rumor 1.2718 0.05721 103 82 14 7
1058 It looks like Mr. Damacle’s position just opened up... 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
1059 It’s his way of ending budget debates. 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
1060 Its what he uses to stop the buck. 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
1061 It's just as difficult, but here the rewards are less legendary. 1.2718 0.05721 103 82 14 7
1062 Bummer, I really thought he was the one. 1.2718 0.04818 103 77 24 2
1063 You should see her with a pen in her hand. 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
1064 Deskcalibur. 1.2718 0.05552 103 81 16 6
1065 looks like it's going to be a rough day. 1.2718 0.05552 103 81 16 6
1066 Its our succession plan 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
1067 This is the final stop on our tour of the MOMA 1.2718 0.05885 103 83 12 8
1068 We call it the king maker. 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
1069 Remove the sword and you will be King of Accounts Receivable. 1.2718 0.05885 103 83 12 8
1070 I suppose it beats getting axed. 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
1071 He bet me I couldn't cut his dick off while he was behind his desk. What would you have done? 1.2718 0.05885 103 83 12 8
1072 Believe me, it’s easier than trying to remember your password. 1.2718 0.05378 103 80 18 5
1073 You think he made his point before he quit. 1.2718 0.05012 103 78 22 3
1074 It seems the sword is mightier than the pen. 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
1075 You show me. ARE you worthy of a corner office? 1.2716 0.06576 81 65 10 6
1076 Well, I see Arthur is out of the office. 1.2710 0.05722 107 86 13 8
1077 It is written, "She who pulleth out this sword of this desk, will make some serious changes around here." 1.2708 0.05635 96 75 16 5
1078 This is Arthur's desk 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1079 Whoever could remove it would become CEO, but no one has tried due to work-comp rules. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1080 But I don't want to be the next Secretary of Veterans Affairs. 1.2692 0.05834 104 84 12 8
1081 Saves time in having to review resumes. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1082 So you'll be using Arthur's office for now.... 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1083 Maybe we'd be better off without a king. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1084 This isn't even the half of it. Thursdays he shows up in a full suit of armor. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1085 Our interview process is a bit unconventional. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1086 Wouldn’t it make more sense to use a search firm? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1087 Unfortunately our policy with respect to medieval weapons was quite vague. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1088 Arthur's thoughts on succession were very clear. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1089 Mr. Arthur had several unsubstantiated claims on his resume. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1090 He's on leave at present. Hernia operation. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1091 It’s a sad and sworded story. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1092 We all chipped-in for the letter opener. 1.2692 0.04779 104 78 24 2
1093 Is this how we're doing succession planning now? 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1094 As I said, Arthur's leadership skills are quite unconventional, yet they are direct, cutting edge, and get right to the point! 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1095 The cleaning lady put it there." 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1096 I know it's somewhat unbelievable but last person who held this job was a woman. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1097 Maybe he couldn't find a pen. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1098 And it is said that one day a champion will rise to become CEO of the Britons... 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1099 That's one hell of a letter opener. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1100 That puts the "Ex" in "Calibur." 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1101 Bob isn't taking the cuts to our benefits well. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1102 It’s just a formality. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1103 You and I don’t need to worry. This is only for the diverse employees and the women. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1104 Go get Arthur from accounting. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1105 I wonder how his exit interview went. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1106 Legend has it that if you can pull the sword out from the desk, all your sexual harassment suits will be settled before going to court with no press. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1107 We're going back to basics to choose the next CEO. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1108 The window office doesn't come easy. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1109 If Human Resources doesn't find King Arthur soon, we will run out of desks. 1.2692 0.04371 104 76 28 0
1110 It’s an unconventional way of choosing a CEO but give it a try. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1111 That’s odd. I heard Bob got the ax. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1112 Legend says, 'Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise king of the window office.' 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1113 'So you see, we've updated our selection process for the internship.' 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1114 It's the new hiring process. Pull it out and you can skip the next three interviews. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1115 I understand that the Executive Search Committee has decided to simplify the process 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1116 He who can free the blade gets comprehensive health and ten vacation days. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1117 Does this mean I can have your old letter opener 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1118 This is nothing. Previously the CEO candidates had to perform the Twelve Labours of Hercules. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1119 whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise CEO born of the Company 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1120 So King Arthur just gave his two weeks notice 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1121 It was weird enough when our last boss ordered a stone desk. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1122 We're not allowed to try until Health and Safety gives the all clear. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1123 I told him never to hide under the desk! 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1124 You can come out now, Harold. You did NOT get the axe. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1125 Dave From Accounting and His Nights at the Square Table 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1126 You only get to be CEO. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1127 If you can remove it, you will unite the accounting department, and lead us to a strong fourth quarter. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1128 And this used to be Merlin’s office. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1129 The letter opener actually works. 1.2692 0.04779 104 78 24 2
1130 Is that an invitation to a quest or a hint of what’s to come? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1131 He who removeth it shall... Ah to hell with it. You want the job or not? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1132 They say the first person to remove the sword from the desk will wield unlimited inter-departmental power. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1133 Whosoever pulleth Excalibur from this desk shall be rightly named the next Regional Manager for Northeast Ohio. 1.2692 0.05834 104 84 12 8
1134 Even if you pull it out, you still have to get approved by the board of directors. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1135 Don't look under the desk. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1136 It's not the executive search process I'd have picked either, but the Lady of the Lake is on the board. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1137 This is why we tell you to turn on spell check. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1138 The way it usually goes around here is the someone who pulls it out uses it to stab someone else in the back. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1139 Last time he hides under his desk! 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1140 Seems like a lot of effort for a better parking space. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1141 Oh My. And I thought ‘...,Die by the sword,’ was just metaphorical. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1142 The Board has decided to choose the new CEO by using the Merlin method. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1143 King Arthur abdicated once he realized there was more money in investment banking. 1.2692 0.04779 104 78 24 2
1144 And he was worried about getting the axe. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1145 Seems like only yesterday she was a letter opener. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1146 You can't beat the view but that letter opener is so pre-email... 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1147 It's actual easy to remove, but nobody wants the job. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1148 The old man always had a flare for the dramatic. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1149 I thought the pen was mightier. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1150 A round table would be more compelling. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1151 Leaders today prefer the shield of limited liability. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1152 HR's new approach to eliminate all those tedious rounds of interviews. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1153 Well, that explains his bandaged pelvis. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1154 I liked it better when it was just a 'dog eat dog' world. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1155 So now I know why the job's been open so long. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1156 Wow...what happened to the old "pink slip"? 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1157 The boss caught him hiding under his desk again. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1158 Jim, I thought we’ve gone over this. It’s the pen that’s mightier. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1159 At least he took a stab at middle management. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1160 I keep taking it out, but Art keeps putting it back. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1161 I look high and low for my letter opener, and - bam - there it is. 1.2692 0.04579 104 77 26 1
1162 This Disney merger has really been magical. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1163 Ah man, I told him he needed to get his desk SORTED. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1164 The lady from Lake Office Supplies stopped by. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1165 Sure, you could pull it out, but then you'd have to be the new VP of Marketing AND King of England. 1.2692 0.04779 104 78 24 2
1166 No, it's not a challenge for new hires. The former CEO is under the desk. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1167 big envelopes 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1168 My kingdom for some WD-40! 1.2692 0.04779 104 78 24 2
1169 It's for opening your really big envelopes. 1.2692 0.05834 104 84 12 8
1170 Behold Excalibur! The sword of power! Forged when copiers and staplers and sticky notes were One with Man, and PowerPoint was but a dream! 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1171 This is the office of one of our retired partners. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1172 There it is, Floyd... draw the sword and we’ll finally vanquish the poor and defenseless. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1173 Think of it as management's quest to avoid poring over a stack of resumes. 1.2692 0.04779 104 78 24 2
1174 Many have tried for the corner office, Mr. Arthur ... 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1175 Well, we have our answer. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1176 We're looking for some one with an Ivy League MBA who is well versed in Arthurian legend. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1177 I'm just glad it wasn't a typo after all - he honestly meant to threaten to leave a large sword on my desk and not a large "s-word." 1.2692 0.05834 104 84 12 8
1178 Don't get excited. It's just a tease. So far, everyone in middle-management has pulled it out. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1179 We have a very competitive severance package. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1180 Merlin,can you join us in here? 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1181 Still, I kinda miss nepotism. 1.2667 0.05624 105 84 14 7
1182 "See, commas as important. H.R. had him listed as King, Arthur --not King Arthur! 1.2667 0.05784 105 85 12 8
1183 At least he left us with a succession plan. 1.2667 0.05288 105 82 18 5
1184 Who so pulleth out this sword from this desk is right wise regional director of sales for the greater Toledo area. 1.2667 0.05288 105 82 18 5
1185 The pen has been trumped by the sword! 1.2667 0.05940 105 86 10 9
1186 And your armor is being delivered to the mail room. 1.2667 0.04929 105 80 22 3
1187 Did you call IT? 1.2667 0.05784 105 85 12 8
1188 I thought they usually used an axe. 1.2667 0.05288 105 82 18 5
1189 I think they should go back to pink slips. 1.2667 0.05458 105 83 16 6
1190 Okay...this is the final step in our interview process. 1.2667 0.04929 105 80 22 3
1191 Police say he misread the memo as, “casualty friday.” 1.2667 0.05940 105 86 10 9
1192 We haven’t had a secretary in over 600 years. 1.2667 0.05458 105 83 16 6
1193 Looks like the best democratic candidate in 2020 is a sword. 1.2667 0.05458 105 83 16 6
1194 Apparently, "he who removes the sword", gets the corner office, with a view. 1.2667 0.05288 105 82 18 5
1195 This is the final part of your interview. 1.2667 0.05624 105 84 14 7
1196 That's cute, Gary, but I'm still going to need to see your references. 1.2667 0.05784 105 85 12 8
1197 I guess it is quite mighty after all. 1.2667 0.04929 105 80 22 3
1198 Yah, just like the movie. Except instead of a king, you'll be mid-management. 1.2667 0.05288 105 82 18 5
1199 Arthur’s family must be in town again. 1.2647 0.05561 102 81 15 6
1200 Come out from under the desk Arthur. We know you're here. 1.2647 0.05383 102 80 17 5
1201 It looks like H.R. is going old-school. 1.2647 0.05200 102 79 19 4
1202 Hostile takeover. 1.2647 0.05200 102 79 19 4
1203 Nobody expected the Spanish Inquisition. 1.2647 0.05561 102 81 15 6
1204 I did say that I was looking for a challenge. 1.2647 0.05383 102 80 17 5
1205 Oh no, not again... 1.2647 0.05732 102 82 13 7
1206 Arthur is never in before 4pm. He works the knight shift. 1.2647 0.05561 102 81 15 6
1207 He came, he worked, and i guess he conquered. 1.2647 0.05561 102 81 15 6
1208 Looks like he complained about the sushi again 1.2647 0.05899 102 83 11 8
1209 At King Arthur Flour we have a unique process for selecting a CEO. 1.2647 0.05200 102 79 19 4
1210 I was just hoping for the accounting position 1.2647 0.05200 102 79 19 4
1211 Only the true president can remove the sword. We used to do electoral colleges, but the sword is more accurate. 1.2626 0.05292 99 77 18 4
1212 What requirements we do have for this office are not set in stone 1.2626 0.04671 99 74 24 1
1213 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise heir of this occupation... plus full benefits and two weeks paid vacation. 1.2621 0.04772 103 78 23 2
1214 Oil mogul, Excaliburton. 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1215 HR is having trouble finding the right person for the job. So they're giving this a whirl. 1.2604 0.04503 96 71 25 0
1216 Take your time, but remember that evidence of a Google search will automatically disqualify you. 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1217 The search firm recommended it. 1.2604 0.04503 96 71 25 0
1218 Our IT guys think it might be Russian. 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1219 It was easy. It's an IKEA desk. 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1220 All he said was 'I'm sick of this desk, I want a round table' 1.2604 0.05389 96 75 17 4
1221 The desk isn’t even round. 1.2604 0.04966 96 73 21 2
1222 So Conan got laid off. 1.2600 0.04632 100 75 24 1
1223 I guess the barbarians made it past the gate... 1.2600 0.05245 100 78 18 4
1224 At least he took a stab at the desk job. 1.2600 0.05245 100 78 18 4
1225 It's time for him to switch to a fly swatter. 1.2584 0.05426 89 69 17 3
1226 He's just having a hard fortnight. 1.2581 0.05492 93 73 16 4
1227 Once again. She missed the point. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1228 I don't see the point. 1.2577 0.04922 97 74 21 2
1229 Mr Damocles, it's time. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1230 This interview round is going to have a practical component. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1231 ...and they say he who pulls the sword will solve the production problems of the model 3 1.2577 0.05913 97 79 11 7
1232 The boss is a legend in his own mind. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1233 Carl really needs to stop watching Game of Thrones 1.2577 0.05135 97 75 19 3
1234 THAT’s one resignation note that’s clear. 1.2577 0.05135 97 75 19 3
1235 …plus, a key to the executive bathroom, reserved parking space, golf club membership, dominion over all you survey, and a crown. 1.2577 0.05728 97 78 13 6
1236 Seriously, if you can get it out, it’s all yours. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1237 The desk is yours if you think you can cut it 1.2577 0.05135 97 75 19 3
1238 Art re-living his glory days again. 1.2577 0.05135 97 75 19 3
1239 He who pulls the sword from the desk shall be bestowed dental coverage. 1.2577 0.04922 97 74 21 2
1240 And I’ve only got one week to come up with a caption for it. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1241 The beheadings will continue until morale improves. 1.2577 0.05538 97 77 15 5
1242 Whoso pulleth this sword of this desk is rightwise majority shareholder of the shell company that owns the shell company that owns the copyright to the crown of England. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1243 He who lives by the desk, shall die by the desk. 1.2577 0.05728 97 78 13 6
1244 You would think that with only one requirement it wouldn't take that long to fill the position. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1245 So, as I was saying, before you can finish your probationary period in upper management, you'll have to meet some new benchmarks. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
1246 The last one to pull it out was Kennedy. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
1247 He won't retire until his replacement proves himself. 1.2553 0.04522 94 70 24 0
1248 They say whoever pulls it out, will be fired. 1.2553 0.05002 94 72 20 2
1249 Leave it as a sundial. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
1250 Whoever takes a stab at that job had better be of the highest executive caliber. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
1251 They called him Office Maximus. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
1252 Looks like the top job is up for grabs. 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1253 Millenials. Go figure. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1254 You have a better chance getting the sword out, than winning the New Yorker Caption Contest 1.2551 0.04658 98 74 23 1
1255 I already called building maintenance, they're sending up that new guy, Artie 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1256 Then, once it is yours, emulate those who preceded you and stab others in the back. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1257 Here at Trump, Inc., we believe the sword is mightier than then pen. 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1258 Lance called in sick today. 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1259 He was supposed to fall on it. 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
1260 This time, the pen lost. 1.2551 0.04658 98 74 23 1
1261 I knew I should have worked from home today. 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1262 Guess we're hiring. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1263 Things just haven't been the same around here since Billy was found sleeping under his desk. 1.2551 0.06035 98 81 9 8
1264 Yeah, but where's Damocles? 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1265 He did say he would take a stab at it. 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1266 He always seemed like the type to fall on his sword 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1267 His letter-opener matched his ego. 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1268 As the prophecy states, ‘He who removes the sword shall be crowned the Deputy Assistant Vice President of Regional Development Operations’ 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
1269 I wonder if that new guy, Arthur, knows about this. 1.2551 0.04878 98 75 21 2
1270 Looks like HR has posted another job opening. 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1271 What makes you so sure the takeover will be hostile? 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1272 We call it Excelcalibur 1.2551 0.05858 98 80 11 7
1273 It's been there since the Kennedy administration. 1.2551 0.06035 98 81 9 8
1274 Our succession plan is a bit medieval. 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1275 Yeah, it’s solid. It was imported from China just in time. 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
1276 Have you considered just hitting "forgot password"? 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1277 Let me guess. This was Arthur's old office? 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1278 So are you ready to try this, Randolph? I can remember when you came in on the ground floor and made short work of the Augean Stables. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1279 Looks like the hostile takeover won. 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1280 Actually, legal says we can’t call it Excalibur, so Pointy McPointface, it is. 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
1281 Who keeps a letter opener in their desk anymore? 1.2551 0.04878 98 75 21 2
1282 Arthur is out to lunch. 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1283 This isn't a job interview per se. 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1284 It doesn't mean a thing, just the usual office politics around here. 1.2551 0.04658 98 74 23 1
1285 Last guy walked out the door yelling "FREEDOM." 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1286 No. He couldn't pull it out either. Now he's having an identity crisis. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1287 He only works knights. 1.2551 0.04878 98 75 21 2
1288 I guess Mitch is attending his anger management class today. 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1289 we get the point 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1290 This isn't what I meant when I said to leave honest feedback on my desk 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1291 I know it's worked before, but isn't there a better way to find our next CEO. 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
1292 His wife has terrible temper. 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1293 We had to design around it. Is it obvious? 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1294 Is your greed pure enough? 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1295 Just be careful where you put your knees. 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1296 Leave it for the knight crew. 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
1297 If you don't get the sword, you get the axe instead. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1298 You should see his pen. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1299 He fired Damocles. 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1300 The new FBI Director will have special powers. 1.2551 0.04878 98 75 21 2
1301 All of our promotions are merit based. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1302 Looks like the position is still open. 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1303 Oh, he was pretty good. But a legend? No. Not quite a legend. 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1304 Damocles had this office before you. 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
1305 Wait till you see the executive washroom. 1.2551 0.04878 98 75 21 2
1306 Last week, Jerry got the ax. 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
1307 Welcome aboard, Arthur, and be glad your name's not Damocles. 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1308 The latest and best letter opener. 1.2551 0.04658 98 74 23 1
1309 Unlike a pink slip, you can use this over and over again. 1.2551 0.05089 98 76 19 3
1310 It’s Trump’s latest ‘Apprentice’ challenge. Whoever can remove it gets to be the new White House Chief of Staff. 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1311 Call Arthur in Security. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1312 You're saying if I pull the sword from that desk, I get my own toilet? 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1313 The last letter he opened made him angry" 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
1314 I’m impressed. That’s a granite countertop. 1.2551 0.04878 98 75 21 2
1315 The legend lives on. 1.2551 0.04878 98 75 21 2
1316 I thought it was a metaphor . 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1317 Man, these password security challenges are getting really tough. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1318 It looks like the pen is taking a back seat in this one. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1319 We prefer a different approach to interviewing here at King Arthur Flour. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1320 I guess Arthur wasn’t ready for such a big career change 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1321 Good thing that Damocles called in sick today. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1322 Have Human Resources lower the bar or we won't fill this spot in our lifetime. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1323 So, it looks like the rumors about downsizing are true. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1324 It simplifies the vetting process. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1325 Pull to the right to make the chair go up. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1326 The janitor takes it out every night when she cleans, and then puts it back, but they still won't give her the position. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1327 Well, the sword is definitely mightier than the desk. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1328 Whomsoever removes the sword becomes accounts receivable. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1329 Feeling mythical, Lance? 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1330 Finding a new CEO is taking longer than we anticipated. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1331 I miss when you could just apply online. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1332 Legend has it that whoever pulls it out gets to be CEO. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1333 I still say the pen is mightier. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1334 And the irony is it’s bulletproof. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1335 These new login password requirements are getting ridiculous. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1336 That's the last time I do happy hour at Medieval Times. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1337 Our founder had some issues regarding his succession. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1338 As you can see, it was a hostile takeover. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1339 This is the last step in the selection process. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1340 You know, I appreciate the imagery, but whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise assistant manager of all human resources just doesn't have the same ring to it. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1341 Arthur will be back soon to pull it out. He's in Mueller's office answering a few questions. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1342 I thought he got axed. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1343 Yesterday they said it was the Russians, today who knows. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1344 Promotions here are merit based, but rare. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1345 He cuts a mean deal. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1346 Imported Camelot Marble. It was a Groupon. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1347 This is the place where legends are made 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1348 It's, like, I get it, we make swords. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1349 Remove it and the office is yours. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1350 HR has taken the interview process to a whole new level. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1351 And this is where we keep the Executive Letter Opener. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1352 Clearly #metoo again. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1353 I think Arthur is taking the CEO selection far too seriously. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1354 It’s not even a round table. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1355 These Google interviews are getting more and more ridiculous 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1356 Pull this off, and the corner office is yours. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1357 Ah. I see he's been served. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1358 If the job was any good, they would have put it in a stone. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1359 Next, I’ll show you where we keep the three-hole punch. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1360 Must be at home, falling on his pen..... 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1361 Someone named Arthur called and said he can remove it with no problem. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1362 The career path here depends on skill with e-mail and the s-word. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1363 You should see his tweets. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1364 Clearly a message from the higher-ups. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1365 Don't scoot in too far. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1366 That's some resignation! 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1367 It's said whomever pulls out the sword gets a free desk with slight damage. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1368 We will expect you to stay late and work knights. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1369 Samurai resignation letter ? 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1370 It's been there for ages. Apparently 'pure of heart' and 'CEO' are mutually exclusive. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1371 You are correct sir. That is an odd place for a flag. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1372 Paperless business solutions, are never dull. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1373 I think this is Arthur's resignation. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1374 the desk had it coming. 1.2526 0.06165 95 79 8 8
1375 Reportedly, Mr. Sessions thought he saw a Dreamer crawl under his desk. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1376 I guess it's worth a try. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1377 Last time he was here, he left a silver bullet. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1378 So here is the last step in your job interview. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1379 Try doing THAT with a pen! 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1380 Only the once and future CEO can yield Excalibur. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1381 Well how do YOU think we should choose a CEO? 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1382 Not so mighty. The last guy left a pen 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1383 If you can pull it out, the job is yours, Arty. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1384 They didn’t tell us the new installment would be THIS cutting-edge... 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1385 Before we discuss salary, there is one more step in the interview process. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1386 I think you’re a great fit, but the final say is out of my hands. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1387 Did you call Arthur from I.T.? 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1388 If only Perkins had stayed with us in the cubicles... he could have fallen on his sword for us all. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1389 Do we dare to look under the desk? 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1390 That had to hurt. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1391 Needless to say, our conference room table is round. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1392 If you succeed, you shall rule Accounts Receivable with the world’s largest letter opener. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1393 Harry's analysis was to invest in plowshares. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1394 And that’s the last time anyone hid beneath her desk. 1.2526 0.04725 95 72 22 1
1395 Arthur has such a ridiculous letter opener. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1396 The pen lost. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1397 I guess the pen isn't always mightier... 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1398 Lance, I like you a lot, but don't get any ideas. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1399 this makes hiring the next CEO a little more interesting. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1400 We asked Arthur to clean his desk when he retired, but he said "not my job anymore." 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1401 Legend tells of a wise CEO. Still waiting. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1402 Do you think he is upset for being fired. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1403 He was right. It does stop here. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1404 I’ll take that as his resignation letter. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1405 The boss warned him not nap under his desk 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1406 Once upon a time all a person needed was an MBA. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1407 What a week for Arthur to go on vacation. 1.2526 0.04482 95 71 24 0
1408 This used to be Mitt Romney‘s office. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1409 I think we need to update our succession plan. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1410 I own a fifty one percent stake and it still won’t budge! 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1411 With any luck he's under the desk. 1.2526 0.04482 95 71 24 0
1412 Maybe this would be a better way to choose a President? 1.2526 0.04482 95 71 24 0
1413 As you can see, the board is still holding out for the 'One True CEO'. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1414 It seems he used the words 'watery bint' one time too many. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1415 We at Camelot Inc. believe in upholding tradition throughout the hiring process. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1416 You think the letter opener is big ? Wait 'til you meet your new secretary. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1417 But if you fail, you're transformed into an Uber driver. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1418 'Me Too' strikes again. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1419 That's his letter opener from Kim Jong Un... 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1420 No, he was very specific- if it comes out, the job is yours. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1421 We could ship it to England, but they would charge us 25% tariff for the steel . 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1422 They say this is how Arthur Anderson was founded. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1423 You do realize Arthur, this new position requires you to work knightly. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1424 I'll get Art the janitor to remove that. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1425 We still need to clean out the previous occupant’s effects..er..stuff. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1426 And, now we come to the final stage of the interview process. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1427 It was Pam, from accounting, with the sword in the board room. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1428 Jeffries was a casualty of a VERY hostile takeover. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1429 His LinkedIn profile said 'sharp and incisive'. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1430 My pen is still mightier!!! 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1431 If she can do it, it breaks the glass ceiling. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1432 He dared to ask for a raise 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1433 The sword in the desk just doesn't have the same ring to it. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1434 It's easy to remove the sword. It's just that nobody wants to be king of Sears. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1435 There's also a note titled 'to the guy who's replacing me' 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1436 The only risk is whoever succeeds could be an unqualified, inexperienced lunatic. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1437 She's downtown, waiting for the prints to arrive. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1438 I suspect Viviane from personnel put it there. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1439 Tell Arthur we are running out of time. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1440 When they offered me the position, I said I'd take a stab at it. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1441 Well Arthur it appears the job is yours 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1442 They're making it harder and harder to get a promotion these days. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1443 Here it is, that hostile takeover bid we know would come. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1444 That's what everyone thinks, but actually he was just really pissed off. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1445 Only a woman can save us now. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1446 To be fair, he was always telling us to work to the hilt. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1447 You'll get used to it. This is actually a pretty normal Tuesday. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1448 I know he didn't like the desk, but did he have to kill it? 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1449 We work knights around here. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1450 Honestly, he tries every day. Now, he blames IT. 1.2526 0.04725 95 72 22 1
1451 He's going to interview at King Arthur Flour. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1452 It's an old-fashioned hostile takeover. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1453 I think it got him in the . . . . the particulars. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1454 No one has been able to pull it out, so it looks like we'll have to hire an executive serach firm after all. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1455 A rather aggressive form of hacking, no? 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1456 And finally the office of the Once and Future CEO 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1457 'I was kinda expecting a note of some sort.' 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1458 I’m just glad it’s not a pen. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1459 Me? Gosh no. I've never tried. I'm afraid of failure. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1460 His tenure was one brief, shining moment. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1461 Poor Bob. He kept saying a Sword of Damocles hanging over him, but no one took it seriously. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1462 Do you have what it takes to be the Once and Future Accountant? 1.2526 0.06165 95 79 8 8
1463 Looks like the corporate pirates made a visit. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1464 It's mightier than the pen, AND the table. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1465 According to Merlin, it's our only hope of finding someone capable of leading us through Brexit. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1466 I see his ex wife was here. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1467 It's just a pen. But you must admit the metaphor is rather compelling. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1468 Reserved for whosoever can worketh our Merlin database. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1469 It’s cheaper and more effective than a motivational speaker. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1470 Should we leave a note? 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1471 I've told you before, actors just aren't meant for the corporate world. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1472 He was always en garde. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1473 So much for a letter of resignation. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1474 It's said that the employee who can remove the sword from the desk will own the company, yet the guy who put it there got fired. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1475 Looks like he received an answer to his harassment complaint. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1476 Hackers. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1477 I meant I wanted a tribute to Dr. King, Arthur. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1478 Do it and you'll be treated like a king around here. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1479 Alex said it wasn't even fit to be tied. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1480 The employee who can remove it gets full benifits. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1481 Go ahead, Art. Give it a try. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1482 And now to the final stage of your interview. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1483 The caption writes itself. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1484 So much for hiding safely under the desk! 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1485 He uses it as a letter opener. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1486 Let’s just say it was a forced retirement. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1487 I told them not to lay off Arthur. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1488 If anyone can get the sword out of the desk, then we will not have to buy another desk. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1489 Legend? No, one of the interns got drunk at Bill's retirement party and now we can't get it out 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1490 I guess the rumor about a hostile takeover is true! 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1491 I heard his stress ball broke 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1492 Oh, and try not to hit the chair's 'raise' lever. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1493 He leaves it like that when he goes to the men's room. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1494 Whoso pulleth the sword must repaireth the hole in the desk. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1495 He told me to take a stab at the problem - so I did. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1496 I guess this explains why he didn't set an out out office reply. 1.2526 0.06165 95 79 8 8
1497 He seemed to go from high caliber to Excalibur over night. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1498 This company's mortgaged to the hilt. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1499 Whomever can pull the sword from the desk will be the next CEO 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1500 Whoever can pull this out gets the Santa Barbara office. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1501 Many men have tried, and failed, to claim the corner office, MacMillen. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1502 He'll get it out. He's been doing pilates. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1503 Last time he drew a line. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1504 There is a legend about the sword and our glorious future leader, but truth is we bought it at a sale with a messy divorce settlement. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1505 If you can pull it out, the whole company is yours. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1506 If you can pull it out, the place is yours. 1.2526 0.04725 95 72 22 1
1507 Your predecessor thought it was a letter opener. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1508 Rudy had a eureka moment; he said this will prove the legitimacy of the current leadership. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1509 Someone mentioned succession planning. The next day this appeared. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1510 One more little HR formality, Artie, and the job is yours. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1511 We’re only accepting applicants named Arthur 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1512 He's a bit old school in that he still thinks the sword is mightier than the pen 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1513 It's an archaic way to choose our sales manager, Arthur, but we've been able to completely eliminate the Personnel Department. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1514 Dangit, he left his desk light on again. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1515 It's not a clever metaphor. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1516 If you can pull out the sword the job is yours. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1517 That old guy Merlin from maintenance told me to come up here and give it a pull. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1518 The search committee has apparently reached a dead end. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1519 You try it. I dont want the job. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1520 I feel like my MBA was a wasted effort. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1521 Did you say your name was Arthur? 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1522 Legend says whoever can lift it will be crowned Senior Vice President of New England Operations. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1523 It's not what you think. It's for manila envelopes. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1524 Well, Arthur...you really have your work cut out for you. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1525 So Arthur, think you've got what it takes to become Vice President - Assistant -Administrative Services 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1526 In this case, I think the sword is mightier than the pen. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1527 Ugh... I hate when I forget my password. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1528 No its not a symbol nor a test of any kind. My secretary actually tried to kill me. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1529 This is the third time we’re replacing Arthur’s desk. 1.2526 0.05593 95 76 14 5
1530 I am not buying the Ambien defense. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1531 We've had some trouble filling this position. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1532 HR isn't completely on board with this new hiring strategy. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1533 His parting words were that he was having an ‘Ambien moment’. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1534 I've really had it... 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1535 It was one my more difficult exit interviews. 1.2500 0.05705 92 74 13 5
1536 We discourage napping. 1.2500 0.05339 96 76 16 4
1537 Pull it out and they say they'll overlook your time in the Trump Administration. 1.2500 0.05923 96 79 10 7
1538 For this position, we will ignore the conventional job interview process. 1.2500 0.05038 92 71 19 2
1539 First place gets the sword, second place,... the ax. 1.2500 0.05541 96 77 14 5
1540 He was not too happy about being asked to retire. 1.2500 0.05270 92 72 17 3
1541 Remove the sword and claim old Art's office or go back to your cubicle. 1.2500 0.05339 96 76 16 4
1542 The pen is indeed mightier, but this adds negotiating flair! 1.2500 0.05130 96 75 18 3
1543 Arthur, you just need to do one thing and the CEO position is yours. 1.2500 0.05923 96 79 10 7
1544 Looks like he finally got the point. 1.2500 0.05735 96 78 12 6
1545 I trust you'll find your new office has everything you need, Arthur. 1.2500 0.04911 96 74 20 2
1546 I guess he's really upset by the Russian question. 1.2500 0.04911 96 74 20 2
1547 How will the ploughshareholders feel about this? 1.2500 0.05492 92 73 15 4
1548 Damocles quit, citing a hostile work environment. 1.2500 0.04911 96 74 20 2
1549 The selection committee just couldn't reach a consensus on a new CEO, so this is plan "B". 1.2500 0.05339 96 76 16 4
1550 It's from our executive search company. 1.2500 0.05923 96 79 10 7
1551 Take it, Arthur, and the corner office is yours. 1.2500 0.05130 96 75 18 3
1552 Pull that thing out of there, Arthur, and Merlin in procurement will get you a round table! 1.2500 0.05038 92 71 19 2
1553 Our executive vetting process is somewhat antiquated. 1.2500 0.05130 96 75 18 3
1554 We just can’t get George to finish that Thrones book. 1.2500 0.05492 92 73 15 4
1555 Arthur always had a flare for the dramatic. 1.2500 0.05911 92 75 11 6
1556 Wow, I didnt know the boss left early to return to Camelot. He is really sticking it to us! 1.2500 0.05339 96 76 16 4
1557 He just could not make the cut. 1.2500 0.05541 96 77 14 5
1558 She didn't name a successor. 1.2500 0.05923 96 79 10 7
1559 No, this is Wll Street. You have to stick in to the hilt. 1.2500 0.05541 96 77 14 5
1560 His pen wasn't mightier. 1.2500 0.05735 96 78 12 6
1561 He who pulls the sword from the desk is rightwise king of the corner office. 1.2500 0.05541 96 77 14 5
1562 He fell under his sword. 1.2475 0.05523 101 82 13 6
1563 Well, it looks like Arthur’s been rewatching Game of Thrones at the office again... 1.2474 0.04642 97 74 22 1
1564 Once the prophecy unfolds, he or she will micromanage all that they can see. 1.2474 0.04867 97 75 20 2
1565 He could have ruled this company, if he hadn't been napping under his desk at the time. 1.2474 0.04867 97 75 20 2
1566 We'd like you to take a stab at the final interview challenge. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1567 It's our new interview process! 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1568 Only the rightful C.F.O. can pull the sword from the desk, but we're looking for someone with an M.B.A. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1569 As you can see, we've decided to simplify our interviewing process. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1570 After the interviews, we will be contacting your references and assessing your divine right to the position. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1571 I am clueless. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1572 Remember, Art - If you don't pull it out , you go back to the mailroom! 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1573 Who should we contact first: the S.E.C, H.R., or Merlin? 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1574 He's inside and safe. I saw this trick once at Las Vegas. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1575 Personally it wouldn't be my first choice as a letter opener. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1576 Give it a try, but you should know a dragon ate our last three CEOs. 1.2473 0.06049 93 77 9 7
1577 It's a Sicilian message... It means don't even think about a signing bonus. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1578 Someone needs to call Merlin in HR. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1579 This was easier than having an HR department 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1580 If you can pull it out, you're CEO. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1581 When he left, he said there could be only one man capable of replacing him. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1582 Is it just me, or has our company become a little too passive-aggressive? 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1583 I know it's a medieval way of doing things, but it avoids any need for an electoral college. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1584 So you want to run this place someday, huh? 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1585 It's always been a point of pride to him that flattery never got Damocles a window office. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1586 As yet, no one has accepted his challenge. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1587 Don't touch it. We prefer to let him believe he's the only one who can wield it. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1588 It's called Deskcalibur. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1589 It's part of a company-wide initiative to encourage standing. 1.2473 0.04751 93 71 21 1
1590 And here is the legendary key to the executive washroom. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1591 If you can get that sword out of my desk I'll give you an extra week off and a corner office. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1592 Can your pen do that. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1593 it's just temporary while he gets his rock refinished 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1594 The trick is paying minimum wage employees to pull it out, then taking all the credit and the promotion. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1595 The bonus hurdles are getting ridiculous around here. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1596 I told you you'd be forced to make severe cuts. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1597 At least he died with a sword in his foot. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1598 And here's the guy who makes all the tough calls. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1599 They pick CEO’s a little differently here. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1600 Employee turnover has skyrocketed since we introduced Fight Cub Fridays. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1601 We have a strict “no sleeping under the desk” policy. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1602 Harold this may be your opportunity to win over Guinevere from accounting. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1603 So this is how Arthur became our CEO. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1604 Someday Arthur, all this will be yours. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1605 I hope someone manages to pull it out soon. We're tanking without a CEO. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1606 Another desk job ! 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1607 That's one way to get axed... 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1608 It's not to late to opt out and participate in the Trust Fall. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1609 It must have been a crazy knight 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1610 It's HR's new aptitude test. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1611 HR has devised this final test to see how you'll fit into our team. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1612 If you can't remove it, they remove you. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1613 Well, looks like he went through with pardoning himself. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1614 It also doubles as a key to the executive washroom 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1615 Can someone call Artie on the custodial staff to take care of this? 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1616 but we just ate Arthur... 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1617 We've narrowed the number of candidates down to you and one other applicant. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1618 This promotion is epic. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1619 That's the letter opener. You don't even want to see the pen and pencil set. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1620 This is the CEOs succession plan. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1621 The newest cutting-edge technology, they said. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1622 I still think it's a silly way to select a CEO. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1623 Have you tried turning it off and turning it on again? 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1624 Some people just can't take a joke. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1625 She could have just quit with a note! 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1626 We were all out of axes, so he got the sword. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1627 Somehow his wife knew exactly where his assistant was. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1628 This is our pen mightiness test laboratory. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1629 Only the blue collar workers get the axe. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1630 Only the purest of heart will be able to pull the sword from the desk and become White House Chief of staff...and then fall upo the sword, too. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1631 If you get it out, we can give you the Wi-Fi password. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1632 Whoever pulls the sword out of the desk will be the next CEO. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1633 Our symbology dept is still working out whether it’s a threat or an honour. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1634 HR said it has to be more gender neutral. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1635 Would someone get Damocles in here? 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1636 After the third requests for a round table, Facilities left this... 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1637 You're allowed one phone call to a wizard. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1638 Do you think we should check for him under the desk? 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1639 This is the Mel Gibson desk I bought at auction. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1640 Go see if there's any WD-40 in the janitor's closet. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1641 I guess someone should tell Damocles that it’s safe to come back in. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1642 Well, Arthur, maybe you are in line for a promotion after all. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1643 That's the problem when your CEO is named Arthur King. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1644 Meanwhile, we still await our Burger King. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1645 I think Lehman tried something like this in 2007. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1646 It shortens the interview process 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1647 Whoever removes it gets a lifetime of paperwork 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1648 Wiggins, your work over the last ten years has been exemplary. Just one last task on your road to senior partner. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1649 Budget cuts. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1650 Standard letter openers have a way of disappearing in this office. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1651 Lookin' real sharp boss. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1652 Go get Galahad and Lancelot from maintenance. The boss is at it again. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1653 Remember how I said the higher-ups have some old-fashioned ways of making decisions? 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1654 Your resume is top-notch, but here's where our interview process gets interesting. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1655 She makes a strong point. 1.2473 0.04751 93 71 21 1
1656 Removing the sword is the easy part. The new CEO will have to stop the bleeding. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1657 Pull it out Arthur, and the CEO position is yours. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1658 He’s very old school. He prefers that to algorithms when he slices salaries. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1659 We're still looking for the one true CEO. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1660 He's on the knight shift. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1661 It was one my more difficult exit interviews. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1662 So I guess the pen is really not mightier than the sword. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1663 This was Arthur's office, he couldn't handle the knight shifts. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1664 Well Ivanhoe said he wanted a shredder. 1.2473 0.06049 93 77 9 7
1665 He left his laptop on. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1666 The legend is, whoever can remove that sword is our rightful CEO. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1667 He really knew how to slash a budget 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1668 First, he circumcizes all new applicants. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1669 Let's go ahead and eliminate all candidates not named Arthur 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1670 And this is where she killed her husband’s intern 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1671 No symbolism. Your predecessor tried to steal the desk. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1672 I never can remember the past tense of smite. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1673 It's the latest innovation in buget cuts. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1674 And here, Mr. Arthur, is the final exam in our interview process. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1675 We'll of course have that removed before you start work. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1676 Well, that seems like an arbitrary method for electing a CEO... 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1677 Arthur's desk. He's our legendary leader. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1678 That's the second thing I wanna yank on today. 1.2473 0.06049 93 77 9 7
1679 `…or if a black woman pulls it out she'll get our sincere thanks and a gift bag.' 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1680 Okay, Arthur. Give it a try. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1681 I'll see you in the meeting room with the big round table. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1682 I don't like long shots, but you're our only intern named Arthur. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1683 Corner offices don't come easy here. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1684 Mr. Merlin's way of selecting the next CEO. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1685 There is really only one way to the top here at Medieval Times Restaurant Group. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1686 This is the best succession plan I have ever seen. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1687 I went to Wharton for this? 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1688 Your résumé is great, and the interview went well - now let's see if you get the job. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1689 The boss doesn’t believe in traditional succession planning. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1690 Whoops. Somebody left a sword in the desk. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1691 “Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise 2nd Assistant Vice President of Human Resources. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1692 We're looking for someone who can fix Brexit. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1693 That explains the round conference table! 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1694 At least it's equal opportunity. 1.2473 0.04751 93 71 21 1
1695 Pull it out and the chair is yours. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1696 Alright, Arthur, you want that promotion? 1.2473 0.06049 93 77 9 7
1697 The prize is a country. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1698 Hard to believe it’s all IKEA, isn’t it? 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1699 You should see the letter. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1700 Some see this as a glass ceiling -- I like to think of it as a storied tradition 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1701 We expect you to work knights. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1702 I think this qualifies as security overkill. 1.2473 0.04751 93 71 21 1
1703 Our CEO succession plan is somewhat old school. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1704 The pen was too mighty, so we opted for this instead. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1705 I can say that signing on to the laptop is the harder of the two required tasks. 1.2473 0.06240 93 78 7 8
1706 Don’t worry, no one else can do it either. You have to have integrity. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1707 You’ll be using Ryan’s office while he’s away at anger management training. Just try not to get distracted by the view. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1708 Our search for a new CEO is unconventional, but not unprecedented. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1709 They say that whoever pulls it out is the true head of marketing. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1710 The last guy wasn't cut out for this job, so his position was slashed. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1711 It's a multi-stage interview process. This is the last.... 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1712 Works better than a paper weight. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1713 Every company needs a succession plan. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1714 It is easier than remembering the WiFi password 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1715 No, Trump won't pull it out - he put it there! 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1716 We should have gone with the round table. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1717 His succession planning was legendary. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1718 So Art, what makes you so sure you’ll be the next CEO? 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1719 ....and whomever pulls the sword out will be granted a golden parachute. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1720 The Board trusts this method more than their judgment these days. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1721 They say whoever can remove it will become the Director of HR... You first. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1722 When Joe said he was going to 'take a stab' at the problem we were having, I never thought he meant THIS! 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1723 He mentioned the office didn't have left-handed scissors. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1724 The boss has a thing for medieval times. Also for hernias. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1725 Turns out the pen is only mightier figuratively. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1726 We call this Excalibureaucracy. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1727 Pull it out and you get a round conference table. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1728 It was HR’s idea of equal opportunity. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1729 I guess the sword proved mightier than the pen set. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1730 I have to warn you, the average reign in marketing is about a year and a half. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1731 Great, another team building exercise. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1732 Wouldn't it be easier if the Board just voted? 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1733 ...and this is Sarah's office, she works knights. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1734 Most people do kill for this corner office. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1735 The performance review is pretty self-explanatory. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1736 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise regional district manager. 1.2473 0.04498 93 70 23 0
1737 Let the girl try! 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1738 I'm guessing he went to the gym. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1739 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this pedestal desk is rightwise born regional manager, inside sales, of all Iowa, Minnesota, fair Wisconsin, and the U.P. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1740 Whoever pulls it out gets to delete the president's Twitter account. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1741 Oh, boy, Abramowitz wants to play Vikings again. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1742 I may never be king, but I still like to come up here and just stare at it. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1743 It's just as he left it! 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1744 I'll just assume no one is in charge. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1745 Pull out the sword, and you'll be the Once and Future President! 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1746 Who pulls the sword from the desk gets the blame for the hole. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1747 And here's the corner office. As you can see, promotions around here are determined somewhat arbitrarily. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1748 That’s how you become the CEO. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1749 The pro-gun crowd is going to have a field day with this one. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1750 Tech support says it's a hardware issue. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1751 We expect you will be of higher calibur than your predecessor. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1752 To say we are expecting great things from you is an understatement. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1753 There's also a lovely lake nearby the secretaries take their lunch at. 1.2473 0.04751 93 71 21 1
1754 Arthur didn’t like getting his pink slip. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1755 Whosoever removes the sword shall get the window office. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1756 It's a set from the movie "The Sword and the Desk." 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1757 The ultimate test for pens. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1758 Gladys hates it when I work weekends. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1759 Actually, there's a choice: you can try the sword--or take a 15-page copy-editing test. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1760 He said he'd take a stab at it. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1761 Whoso pulleth the sword receives the executive parking space. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1762 The board interview is much more legendary. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1763 So it's true! Excalibur Corporation is looking for a new CEO. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1764 Go get Arthur in the Mail Room. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1765 He who can removes the sword is he who locks the door from his desk 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1766 You try it. I dont want the job. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1767 I'd love to pull it out, but I have a feeling it comes with extra responsibility... 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1768 The board was split between that and the sword of Damocles. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1769 Don't worry. He's out to lunch. He wanted a letter opener as powerful as he is. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1770 And this is Arthur's office. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1771 I don't think we need King Arthur for this, just call Bob in maintenance. 1.2473 0.06049 93 77 9 7
1772 Call me old fashioned, but I am still happier with psychometric testing. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1773 He who pulleth out this sword shall rule all of Accounts Payable. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1774 Rock, paper, scissors to pull the sword? 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1775 The guys in accounting sure are competitive! 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1776 If I can pull it out, I'll be the next CEO. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1777 We usually use nameplates, but Arthur insisted on this. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1778 Tradition has it that whoever can pull the sword out will be the next Federal Reserve Chair. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1779 Merlin's back 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1780 Trump set it up, apparently he wants to prove he's the only one who can remove it 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1781 Guinevere, hold my calls. 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1782 Our CEO doesn’t need no stinkin’ rock. 1.2473 0.06240 93 78 7 8
1783 He lived by the sword, but got run over in a crosswalk by an Uber while texting. Poor schmuck. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1784 Ambien. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1785 There's a Gordian knot for the corner office 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1786 Somebody call The New Yorker. 1.2473 0.06049 93 77 9 7
1787 It is our new final requirement for CEO. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1788 I suppose this is all we have after he left with the golden fleece... 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1789 Another week of this and his boss will give him the axe. 1.2473 0.05853 93 76 11 6
1790 I'm telling you, Arthur, it won't budge! It's all because I told Aubrey my letter opener was getting dull... 1.2473 0.04991 93 72 19 2
1791 Missed Me...na, na! 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1792 I am beginning to question our CEO search process. 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1793 And to think a middle manager was dispatched on that very desk only yesterday. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1794 And not a pen in sight. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1795 Now John, this is the final step in your interview process. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
1796 That’s Arthur’s desk. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
1797 So this is where the corporate ladder ends. 1.2472 0.04599 89 67 22 0
1798 Our company offers generous, fate-based opportunities for advancement you won't find most other places. 1.2472 0.04868 89 68 20 1
1799 The third round interviews are a little tougher for this one. 1.2472 0.04599 89 67 22 0
1800 You'll be using Pendragon's old office 1.2447 0.05991 94 78 9 7
1801 "Looks like H R is going medieval on us. 1.2447 0.04944 94 73 19 2
1802 Does "fruit cake" have a hyphen? 1.2447 0.05596 94 76 13 5
1803 I guess we'll see who really is destined for middle management. 1.2447 0.05171 94 74 17 3
1804 This job isn't brain surgery. 1.2447 0.05596 94 76 13 5
1805 This certainly complicates our corporate succession planning. 1.2447 0.05387 94 75 15 4
1806 I told Damocles it was a bad idea. 1.2447 0.05171 94 74 17 3
1807 Someone found out where he napped. 1.2447 0.05991 94 78 9 7
1808 We find that the test is more reliable than a CEO interview. 1.2447 0.05596 94 76 13 5
1809 It's better than receiving the ax 1.2447 0.05171 94 74 17 3
1810 We're just lucky we didn't give him a pen. 1.2447 0.05387 94 75 15 4
1811 The company's approach to CEO selection is legendary. 1.2444 0.05314 90 71 16 3
1812 Merlin in HR thought this was the best way to find a new CEO. 1.2444 0.05544 90 72 14 4
1813 Artie, my boy, this looks like your big chance! 1.2444 0.04822 90 69 20 1
1814 Is that the desk from Caption Contest #498?! 1.2418 0.05263 91 72 16 3
1815 I see someone has already claimed the office 1.2418 0.05708 91 74 12 5
1816 Donald's acting like he actually pulled it out...... 1.2418 0.05263 91 72 16 3
1817 The POTUS has the Resolute Desk. Our CEO has the Retribution Desk. 1.2418 0.05708 91 74 12 5
1818 Pull it out and you're the new CEO. 1.2418 0.05490 91 73 14 4
1819 Our corporate culture provides few opportunities for advancement, but emphasizes transparency in the selection process. Claire from accounting said she could feel it wiggle a bit, but that’s the closest anyone’s come. 1.2418 0.05490 91 73 14 4
1820 Looks like he ate at his desk. 1.2414 0.05161 87 68 17 2
1821 You know it started with "pull my finger". Now this - who knows where it ends. 1.2391 0.05436 92 74 14 4
1822 This process for selecting a new CEO is positively medieval. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1823 Executives who pull it out get what they deserve. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1824 What do you think it means, Artie? 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1825 We still haven't filled the position...HR is looking for the holy grail. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1826 I think his point was to resign. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1827 I told you the Board of Directors was looking for the Holy Grail. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1828 Our leadership succession plan is legendary. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1829 Our last CEO wasn't of the highest caliber. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1830 It started with a sewer safari for alligators and now it's this Holy Grail thing. I'm telling you these testosterone supplements are dangerous. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1831 He who successfully pulls the sword, leads the round table of middle-management. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1832 No one has wanted to try removing it. The last CEO is serving a 15-month sentence. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1833 It's the perfect office for working knights and weekends. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1834 It looks like the pen is taking a back seat in this one. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1835 Most people just use a paper weight. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1836 I keep trying to get him to update his software, but he says he's comfortable with Excalibur. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1837 Look — it’s a family company, the boss’ kid is named Arthur, and it’s just a whole big thing. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1838 Even the sword makes double our salaries 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1839 Behold, Exec-Caliber! 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1840 I guess we ought to rethink the might of the pen. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1841 I told you he wasn’t axed 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1842 The things we have to do around here to get a promotion. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1843 Could been worse - last guy got axed. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1844 So...don't hide under your desk. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1845 Seems like a medieval way of choosing the next CEO. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1846 we've saved a lot on executive searches. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1847 Ahh and this brings us the desk of the Excelibur... 1.2386 0.06259 88 74 7 7
1848 Have at it, but the title doesn't come with a pay raise. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1849 He who can pull the sword from the desk is destined to receive a slightly damaged desk. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1850 And the legend sayeth, ‘He that pulls the sword from the desk shall have bestowed upon him this corner office and be rewarded the key to the Executive Washroom.’ 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1851 Don't we have an Arthur King in the mail room? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1852 Perhaps we should transfer him to the knight shift. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1853 Bob gets a little melodramatic during Game of Thrones season. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1854 And if you can pull the sword from the desk, the Knight account is yours. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
1855 This our head hunter's response to our request for a high caliber executive. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1856 I hear it’s the company’s new way to select senior partners. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1857 Maybe we should have just given him a paper weight. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1858 Is Arthur still in accounting? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1859 So that's probably the last time we'll do Bring Your Aggression to Work Day. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1860 The legend goes anyone that anyone that can pull it out gets this office, a promotion, keys to the executive lounge, and a gold crown. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1861 Arthur was the best, but nothing's set in stone. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1862 Looks like King Arthur prefers round tables. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1863 ... and now for the final part of your interview ... 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1864 He was high caliber, but now he's excalibur. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1865 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this stone and anvil, is rightwise regional office manager from nine to five 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1866 It'll be ages till we find a replacement for Sir Bob in accounting. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1867 I am having serious doubts whether the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1868 and all I did was miss a deadline. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1869 So,, the rumors are true—we’ve been acquired. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1870 Has HR advertised the job? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1871 He couldn't pull the sword so he got the axe! 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1872 Since Art died, we haven't found anyone who can replace him. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1873 It's the last remnant of the hostile takeover. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1874 Pull it out and you got the job. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1875 So, we are going this route instead of ziprecruiter? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1876 No one likes the knight shift. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1877 "Wart," you say? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1878 Somc days he's King Arthur, other days King Lear 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1879 I'm telling you, this promotion is a double-edged sword. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1880 There’s a message here. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1881 She hates red tape 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1882 It beats cleaning out the stables again. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1883 It's his line in the desk. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1884 The secret is to jiggle it. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1885 Her leadership style is positively medieval. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1886 This is where the recent corporate cuts all started! 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1887 The hardest part was getting the license. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1888 Merlin in I.T. says it has biometric ID, so we shouldn't even try to remove it. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1889 Somebody go find Arthur in accounting 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1890 It's been an HR nightmare. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1891 When he said he would have to cut one of us, I didn’t think he meant literally. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1892 We haven't had a CEO since Arthur died. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1893 Keep it to yourself, I did pull the sword out, but when I learned the reward, I put it back. 1.2386 0.06259 88 74 7 7
1894 Well....the Electorial College didn't work.... 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1895 This new instant messaging system really gets your attention 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1896 Now do you believe me about the size of his letter opener? 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1897 The voicemail said we’ll find the Brexit tax plan on his desk. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1898 It's a new interviewing trend; it was started by the same guy behind the whole round table thing. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1899 He ran through too many assistants. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1900 For the last time, my name is Artie not Arthur. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1901 Whoever pulls it out gets to go back in time and unsend any email. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1902 So far, withdrawals have been impossible. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1903 And this is Arthur's office. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1904 he's off on one of his crusades again 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1905 And this is where we keep our glass ceiling. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1906 Well it's better than the electoral college. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1907 Artie in accounting was able to do it, but then I fired him. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1908 Hey, Arthur? Can you come in here, please? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1909 We find that asking candidates for their accomplishments, education, and processing background checks is inferior to the Excalibur challenge. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1910 Phew. I thought he was axed. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1911 Arthur was upset this wasn't a round table. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1912 Well, we were hoping for a different sort of tax cut. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1913 He said a guy named Arthur would come by to pick it up. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1914 Where is King Arthur when we need him? 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1915 The Knights of the Conference Table have all tried and failed. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1916 I heard it even comes with dental. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1917 Just one more thing then you'll be the new CEO of King Arthur Flour. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1918 So, here is our newest pitch for replacing the Electoral College. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1919 Pull out the sword and we'll put you in charge of our division of weird stuff. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1920 In the interest of full disclosure, I should tell you there's a strong internal candidate. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
1921 Well, what do we do now? All the white guys have tried! 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1922 Only now will we see if you are the true heir to the sales region. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1923 Our board decided on a new CEO selection process. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
1924 I guess it's safe to say he didn't get axed. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1925 I don't think I want the job. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1926 Arthur must be out today. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1927 So this would be your office as the once and future comptroller. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1928 A bit of a twist: whoever can push it in gets to retire. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1929 Rumor is a man dressed in armor barged into the office and said, "A Lannister always pays his debt." That's when Manafort ran out screaming like a baby. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1930 Welcome to medieval management, Baxter. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1931 Honestly, King of the Britons is a step down from CEO. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1932 A word of advice. Forget about the legend thing. Just be careful of your knees. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1933 But what if i dont want to work for Scott Pruitt ?? 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1934 The available corner office comes with the Gordian Knot, you can take your pick. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
1935 I miss the old IT guy 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1936 It’s just a formality. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1937 At least his reign will only be four years, eight at the most. 1.2386 0.06259 88 74 7 7
1938 I heard the new CEOs name is Arthur. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1939 "If you can pull it out, what you get is to keep the sword". 1.2386 0.04570 88 67 21 0
1940 Let's not and say we did. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1941 Legend has it the one who pulls it out becomes head of HR. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1942 It turns out the sword is mightier than the laptop. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1943 Looks like the pen isn't mightier than the sword 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1944 It's important to get to know the legend of the Sword and the Phone. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1945 I know you just finished the internship, but we think you're ready to be "executive letter opener." 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1946 He left his mark on the company. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1947 Our office supplies are rather spartan. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1948 Whoso pulleth out this sword makes partner. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1949 Just as I feared— he’s swiping left. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1950 It's been there forever - legend has it that only an intern who is pure of heart can pull it out. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1951 I see they haven't hired a new CEO. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1952 Get me Pendragon, from Accounting. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1953 Just one last test before we make our final decision, 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1954 He always thought he was better than everyone else. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1955 Well, it beats getting axed. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1956 A Post-it Note would have sufficed. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1957 I'm not gonna kid ya, Roger, you weren't our first hire for this job. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1958 And the best part is, no more bloody Linked In messages. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1959 Get me somebody who doesnt believe in trickle down economics and kmows Arthuroian legend. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1960 This hasn't been an easy position to fill, as you might imagine. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1961 They kept saying winter was coming, but this is ridiculous. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1962 At least we don't have to pull his finger. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1963 They say if you successfully pull the sword, you get a $5 gift card to Arby’s. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1964 Quick, pull it out before Trump gets here. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1965 Our new CEO selection process is epic. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1966 Art doesn't like it when people nap down there. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1967 Your resume said "proficient in M-Sword?" 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1968 Well at least it’s not in your back 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1969 The HR department has really gone downhill since Margaret left. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1970 Which one of you is Arthur? 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1971 As you can see, Camelot.com is looking for a new CEO 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1972 This is your new office. The last guy had some problems . We attempted to bury the hatchet but he apparently was confused. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1973 Budget cuts were especially brutal this year. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1974 Pen conquers sword; sword conquers desk. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1975 Final test ... and the job is yours. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1976 His note said WWKAD? (what would King Arthur do) 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1977 Ya'know I have a feeling we're in the wrong office. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1978 Guinevere, in housekeeping, is taking care of it. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1979 And this USED to be Arthur's desk... 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1980 We're looking for "Exec-caliber" 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1981 If you can remove the sword, you get health insurance. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1982 Pull it out, Artie, and the chair is yours. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1983 It’s more important that we find the right person rather than just filling a desk. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1984 We call her Faxcalibur. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
1985 I told you not to reheat fish in the office microwave 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1986 Even the restroom is a challenge. How are your arcane riddle skills, Dale? 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1987 The job posting says there’s a preferred candidate. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1988 Our interview process is a bit unconventional. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
1989 Trust me, if someone pulls it out, it's no Camelot. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1990 This is a job for a woman 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1991 Arthur's coming back, right? 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1992 ya we need a union 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1993 That reminds me. I have tickets to Spamalot next week. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1994 Talk about killing the messenger. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1995 After a few months here, Amazon is going to seem cushy. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1996 The cutbacks around here are quite...literal. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1997 Well on the bright side, it could have been the $45,000 dining room table. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1998 Sir, there was a spider. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1999 I guess drawing the sword from the desk means your skilled enough to stab someone in the back 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2000 Looks like the boss is at his roundtable. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2001 Too heavy-handed for my taste. Do you have something in a light saber? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2002 Arthur, he does as he pleases. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2003 No one name's their kid Arthur anymore... 1.2386 0.04570 88 67 21 0
2004 Do you know how many pencil sharpeners end up in the ocean every year? 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2005 If you can get it out you’ll get to be the new CEO. Otherwise try not to cut the cord when you answer the phone. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2006 Your predecessor had no pull, here. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2007 They said it was "slightly used." 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2008 Behold, the mighty sword Deskalibur. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2009 We have a different approach when selecting a CEO. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2010 No Mr President, I don't think Mr Obama is living under your desk. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2011 Pull this sword from thy desk and the sword shall be thine - and we'll replace the desk. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2012 Should we call Arthur in accounting? 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2013 Did you try just pulling it out? 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2014 So do I get a promotion if I pull it out or what? 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2015 Even getting axed is classier in the c-suite. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2016 Excalibur Industries takes it leadership role seriously. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2017 Arthur, this is why I brought you. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2018 The position’s been empty for a while. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2019 And this office only is used for the knight shift. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2020 This office is Arthur's, the once-and-future accountant. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2021 Bring that intern Arthur in here. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2022 I told you the Lady in the Lake was the wrong token female to put on the Board. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2023 If that thing gets in your way, just pull it out, Art. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2024 Apparently, he was upset because his desk was supposed to be round 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2025 Legend has it, whoever pulls it out is CEO. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2026 His career has been legendary. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2027 I wish they'd just let the Board choose a CEO. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2028 Let the women try. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2029 My name is Arthur. I got this! 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2030 Computer: "You missed!" 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2031 The professor did say he wanted mahogany. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2032 If you can pull the sword out of the desk, the job is yours. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2033 Well it is cheaper than paying severance 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2034 Our hiring qualifications are a bit... unusal. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2035 So far, none of the candidates were able to remove the sword. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2036 Forget about the sword. If you can get Trump out of the Russia mess, you're hired. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2037 We're making some cuts around the office. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2038 So apparently, whoever pulls it out gets Steve's old job in accounting. Not sure why I bothered updating my resume. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2039 I guess this means we can take the day off. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2040 I'd call this a hostile takeover. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2041 And if you can pull that out, you can move the desk up to an office on six. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2042 It's a new idea from Merlin in Human Resources. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2043 He left a note saying he had gone long on plow shares, made a killing, and was quitting. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2044 - Donald 's such a show-off, look at the size of his letter opener - Yeah, Inferiority complex ! - Have you seen my new watch ? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2045 Well yes, here at King Arthur Flour promotions are handled in a rather old fashioned way. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2046 It's written that whoever removes the sword becomes the next CEO. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2047 That’s nothing. Just wait until the second round of interviews. 1.2386 0.04570 88 67 21 0
2048 I take it the Old Man didn't name a successor. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2049 We have finally settled on a plan for CEO succession. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2050 Remove the sword and the job is yours. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2051 In the off-season, she slays dragons and corporate raiders. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2052 He who can remove the sword shall rule the Accounting Department. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2053 I told you this was the beginning of a hostile takeover. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2054 We had a new recruit in last week but she declined to use this office. Opted for full dental coverage instead. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2055 You try, I'm happy in accounting. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2056 And this is our once and future CEO office ... 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2057 They say it´s for the new guy. I think his name is Arthur. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2058 Sure, I could have just sent a boring department email about the budget cuts, but where's the fun in that? 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2059 We prefer a more old-school interview approach. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2060 It's the board's idea of a succession plan... 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2061 The office safety video implies that we should bend our knees when lifting the sword. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2062 We’re looking for someone with a certain je ne sais quoi. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2063 When our rightful CEO pulls out the sword, our stock will rise like the sun and splendor will be restored to the Company. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2064 Sword 1 Pen 0 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2065 Johnson always seems a little insecure. That's his letter opener. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2066 And then I told HR that my name is Arthur King and they sent me up here. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2067 Must have been a big envelope. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2068 Legend has it that it can only be pulled out by the one true CEO... 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2069 This is why we have a strict "no eating at your desk" policy. Lacerated his inner thigh trying to butter a croissant. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2070 Looks like Conan has already gone to lunch. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2071 So what you’re saying is that if I pull the sword from the desk, I’ll become the CEO of this law firm? 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2072 Arthur has left the building. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2073 Our board is legendary. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2074 And if you can push it in, you get a great severance package. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2075 Mr. Morgenstien is more of a, "sword mightier than the pen" type of guy. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2076 It is prophesied that whomever can remove the sword from the desk will be our Regional Senior Associate of Infrastructure Configuration Solutions. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2077 When we say hostile takeover, we mean it. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2078 I suppose it's better than getting the ax. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2079 We're still looking for the right person to head up the Excalibur project. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2080 He never was very tactful. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2081 Et tu, IT guy. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2082 I think Arthur is obsessed with Game of Thrones. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2083 Now to the second phase of the interview. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2084 I don't know, but it can't be good 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2085 Apparently, the pen is mightier than the sword is fake news. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2086 Well, Arthur, everyone in the office seems to think you have a good chance. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2087 The story is that the Lady of the Lake held aloft that very sword and... yeah, I rolled my eyes when I heard it too. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2088 This was Arthur King's desk. He took it a little too far. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2089 Arthur, before you try to remove it I have to ask you something. Are you married? 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2090 So this is what the Brittish headhunter came up with? 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2091 Now let me show you the fax machine. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2092 Should we call Arthur? 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2093 Palmquist, if there's one thing I can't stand it's historical metaphors. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2094 This was Damocles' office... We should probably move on. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2095 It's a period piece. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2096 Congratulations Mr. Arthur. Merlin, Lefey, Morgana and Associates are happy to have you aboard 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2097 Believe it or not, your contact allows the board to fire you for 'cause' if you can't do it. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2098 ‘Twas a sworded end, indeed! 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2099 Come on, how can you still think the pen is mightier? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2100 We’ve decided to simplify our interview process. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2101 It's a much easier hiring process. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2102 Arthur is on medical leave. You can use his office for now. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2103 You should see the boardroom table... 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2104 Who moved the desk? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2105 Whoever can pull it out becomes CEO. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2106 When he got too frustrated he became president instead. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2107 AI,crap, just pull out the damn sword. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2108 It's a corner office, but the letter opener is a bit of a challenge. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2109 Damocles was here a few minutes ago. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2110 See! The sword is mightier than the pen 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2111 That new search firm we hired, Excalibur, insists that this is the best way to select a new CEO. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2112 And that's just his letter opener! 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2113 AND THIS IS THE HUMAN SERVICES OFFICE AT AVALON ENTERPRISES. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2114 Boss says whoever pulls it out is next in line to be CEO 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2115 I know a woman who could totally deal with this, but they’re holding out for a certain kind of guy. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2116 Need I remind you not to touch his stuff?! 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2117 I hope George dosen't still take his afternoon naps under his desk. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2118 Our last manager had some strongly held opinions on the pen being mightier than the sword. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2119 OK Lance, let's see what you can do with Deskalibur. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2120 You meet the new head of IT? I hear it's some guy named Merlin. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2121 The executive search committee is old school. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2122 He read about it in "CEO for Dummies". 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2123 Maybe we shouldn't have said he couldn't cut it. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2124 If you can get it out, the job is yours. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2125 Before the board votes on your idea of switching to a round conference table, there's something they need you to do... 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2126 No, I asked if you don't mind working "KNIGHTS." 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2127 And here's where we're trying a little experiment to select our next CEO. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2128 What? He didn't get the "pen is mightier than the sword" memo? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2129 We should schedule a round table discussion to address this. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2130 If we only we had a name for it. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2131 It's part of the screening process for new hires. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2132 I guess we can assume that the severance package was acceptable. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2133 He's no King Arthur. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2134 The Board is really taking this 'kingmaker' thing too far. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2135 Can I get curtains if I pull the sword out? 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2136 Our accounting division is epic. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2137 My understanding is that he got the idea from his succession planner. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2138 how deep are the cuts again? 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2139 That's a huge letter opener. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2140 Just their way of saying you’ll have to work nights. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2141 Whoever pulls it out gets a $117 million severance package. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2142 We don't do golden parachutes -- we're old school. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2143 HR said its the fairest way 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2144 Unconventional vetting? Maybe, but solidly myth-based 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2145 So consequently we haven't had a CEO now for nearly 10 years 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2146 So, if you pull that bad boy out, does that make you CEO? 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2147 With it comes unimaginable power...and an indictment. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2148 ...these days the pen is not always mightier 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2149 There's plenty of room for upward nobility. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2150 Go ahead give it a try. The board want somebody with mythical powers to replace the last CEO. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2151 I ordered a calendar not Excalibur! 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2152 Well, Damocles, now that it's fallen she's all yours. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2153 If you can pull it out, the job's yours. But any repairs will have to come out of your budget. 1.2386 0.04847 88 68 19 1
2154 Of course I can, but why would I want to? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2155 That’s funny. Wednesdays are sword days. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2156 One of is could be President. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2157 Maybe if Merlin appears, I'll find out why I didn't get that promotion 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2158 This is how the Lady of the Steno Pool picks the next CEO. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2159 They missed 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2160 Sir, you can come out from under the desk now, she went back to her apartment. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2161 Is that a thing? Hyperbole you can see? 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2162 Learn from my mistake and skip the "Deskalibur" joke. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2163 The quants say this is the best way to choose the next manager of our Roundtable Fund. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2164 Like I told you, he said the sword stops here. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2165 We couldn't find a stone. And now we can't get it out. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2166 I guess the anger management classes aren’ t helping. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2167 It's really a cutthroat industry. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2168 They misunderstood when I said I was a night person. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2169 Yes, it is a fairytale office. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2170 He only works knights. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2171 Delusions of grandeur are not uncommon among CEOs. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2172 Boss said if I can remove it I become CEO, but he also said not to touch it... 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2173 Yeah, you could probably muscle it out of there, but do you really WANT that job? 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2174 Whoa Bob, love how you've redecorated. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2175 Don't worry, Merlin knows a guy 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2176 A simple memo greenlighting the "Sword and the Stone" remake would have been sufficient. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2177 And one more word of advice, never fall asleep at your desk. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2178 This was going to be Jared's office. 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
2179 We decided to switch things up a bit and change casual Friday's into Camelot Friday's 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2180 The owner's son just pretends the sword isn't there. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2181 If Arthur wants his old office back, he’s going to have to really earn it this time!” 1.2386 0.04570 88 67 21 0
2182 Whoever pulls the sword is allowed to skip the Christmas party. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2183 Now I understand why he insisted on a round table in the conference room. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2184 After being forced to remove the glass ceilings, we had to get creative. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2185 The job's more or less yours but out of formality... 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2186 Will he be in tomorrow do you think? 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2187 Man #1: "You pull it" Man #2: "No, no you pull it" Man #1: "No, you pull it, I don't want the responsibility" 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2188 Last week it was a gauntlet- and now this. 1.2386 0.06046 88 73 9 6
2189 Latest HR interview protocol...cutting edge....go on give it a pull. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2190 We may need Arthur to get this removed, again. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2191 If you can pull it out, the corner office is yours. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
2192 And I thought getting the axe would have been rough. 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
2193 So that's the new way to hold a election in this Country. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2194 They seem to be getting mightier lately 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
2195 He said, "Sic semper tyrannis", buried the sword in the desk and jumped out the window. 1.2375 0.05409 80 63 15 2
2196 I guess management is serious about no more personal calls. 1.2375 0.05694 80 64 13 3
2197 I heard he's British. Sir Something-or-other, I think. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2198 I see Conan didn't take being laid off too well. 1.2360 0.05059 89 70 17 2
2199 Oh, you meant KNIGHT manager... 1.2360 0.06397 89 76 5 8
2200 Welcome to our fast-track summer internship. 1.2360 0.05767 89 73 11 5
2201 You should see the couch. 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2202 I guess its obvious that he's right handed. 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2203 These desk jobs can be murder. 1.2360 0.05767 89 73 11 5
2204 We recruited our last CEO from a Medieval Times dinner theater. 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2205 We have got to stop watching Game of Thrones in the break room 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2206 It looks like he got tired of waiting for the final season of "Game of Thrones." 1.2360 0.05059 89 70 17 2
2207 Surprise visit from the wife . . . she went for his secretary . . . 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2208 I see “The Lady of the Lake” has been here again! Third time this week... 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2209 ...He did say that he was going to fire the weakest employees 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2210 Quite a response to your PowerPoint. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2211 We use a one-step hiring process. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2212 But on the other hand it is a beautiful granite desk. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2213 If you can pull it out, you get to sit at the round table. 1.2360 0.05767 89 73 11 5
2214 You seem perfect for the job, Artie... 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2215 HR have been testing out new ways of finding the right person for the job. 1.2360 0.05059 89 70 17 2
2216 I guess the sword is mightier than the pen in a paperless office. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2217 CEO? No, two extra personal days. 1.2360 0.05059 89 70 17 2
2218 No on “We’re still not sure how his ex- knew that he’d be hiding under his desk. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2219 Bob’s aesthetics were just too medieval for the company. 1.2360 0.05059 89 70 17 2
2220 Mr. Mueller will be here shortly to give it a try. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2221 Your predecessor left that. He was an accounting wizard. 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2222 Come out, Bill- if you can't pull it, you sure can't push it. 1.2360 0.05059 89 70 17 2
2223 Freddie. I think we need to postpone this morning’s staff meeting. 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2224 That reminds me- how 'bout fish for dinner tonight? 1.2360 0.04800 89 69 19 1
2225 They did say it wasn’t shown to scale. I just expected a letter opener to be on the small side. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2226 I say leave it there. Our tech wizard, Merlin, is the one with all the real power anyway. 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2227 He was never one to mince swords. 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2228 Seems like the pen is not always mightier than the sword, eh?! 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2229 So that's where the letter opener's been all this time. 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2230 They say that the one who removes it will be able to understand all spreadsheets. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2231 The board fired the last guy who pulled it out. Nice severance, though. 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2232 The corporate charter is a bit dated with respect to succession planning. 1.2360 0.05059 89 70 17 2
2233 That pink slip we gave Arthur may have been a mistake. 1.2360 0.05059 89 70 17 2
2234 How well do you know history? 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2235 I know it was you 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2236 I asked for help sorting my desktop 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
2237 Our H.R. director says this qualifies as affirmative action. 1.2360 0.04800 89 69 19 1
2238 So how many Arthurs have we tried here? 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2239 This seems like a job for Arthur, the intern. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2240 Like they say, 'Hell hath no fury. . .' 1.2360 0.05984 89 74 9 6
2241 As the new CEO, you should know that Merlin is on the board of directors. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2242 Darn, I missed his back! 1.2360 0.05984 89 74 9 6
2243 Legend has it that it’s the only way to ensure the rightful heir takes over the company. 1.2360 0.05767 89 73 11 5
2244 And we have a unique early retirement plan. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2245 So this is what she meant by "cutting edge." 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2246 I heard she is a direct descendant of Joan of Arc. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2247 - This is how Millennials quit jobs these days. - I thought they preferred nerfs. - This one likes Games of Thrones. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2248 AI !! Been arguing for hours. 1.2326 0.06336 86 73 6 7
2249 The job interview is actually quite simple.... 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2250 You have two minutes to complete this portion of the job interview. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2251 If you fail, you can still work in the chain mail room. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2252 They say Justice is blind, but she knows who grabbed her butt. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2253 That's been in there since the indictment. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2254 Instead of an interview, we give this mini-mental test to all applicants: "Which one does not belong with the others?" 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2255 Why the drama? He could have just posted an out-of-office reply. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2256 Only she who is fit to rule could pull this from its wooden sheath. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2257 Only he who is fit to rule human resources can pull the sword from the desk. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2258 Looks like the sword was mightier than the pen after all. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2259 Ok, you know who is our boss now. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2260 In actuality of course the board votes for the next chairman. But if you pull the sword out a mechanism dispenses a little piece of gum. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2261 Arthur may be a terrible boss, but I really appreciate his sense of humor. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2262 I'm guessing he's drawing up an Excalibur re-brand. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2263 I tried to tell you that he insisted on a round desk! 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2264 You know, I already pulled it out but I don’t really want the job. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2265 We've gone paperless, do you really even need a letter opener? 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2266 He wants it replaced with a round table. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2267 I thought the pen was supposed to win! 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2268 Looks like we need a Minion. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2269 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise ruler of the company. . . Give it yank, Arthur. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2270 I see Arthur got the job. 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
2271 I should have seen the signs; but on some level I wanted to believe it was a paperweight. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2272 It was either this or the sword of Damocles. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2273 Yes, Senator. It’s all in my proposed Constitutional Amendment. I strongly suggest we try this method in 2020. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2274 Legend has it if you can pull her out you get dental 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
2275 I'm starting to regret that I named the company Camelot Ltd. 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
2276 The new head of H.R. was an English major at Columbia. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2277 We find it works even better than the glass ceiling. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2278 I hear only bald white men can wield its power 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2279 The stone didn't fit. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2280 It helps to establish a safeword. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2281 I was expecting a round table. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2282 If you push it one way, a little hand comes out and pulls it back 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2283 Looks like Arthur put in his two weeks. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2284 All the bathroom keys are in the pencil drawer. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2285 Action that, Artie! 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2286 The corner office is nice, but the company car does tend to breath fire. That’s a factor to consider. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2287 Thor's off his meds again. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2288 No, if you pull it out I become the CEO, but it would definitely help your chances of becoming an unpaid intern here. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2289 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk gets an office with a window. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2290 They say whoever can pull it out gets to be the new Assistant Regional Director. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2291 Nope not yet. Let the boy try! 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
2292 I need my desk. Get Arthur back in here. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2293 And so it was that Donald became King of the United States. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2294 I called her a secretary. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2295 Talk about a hard deadline. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2296 Our white knight is away from his desk at the moment. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2297 Nobody knew the boss was under the desk! 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2298 I told him the bullet-proof desk was just going to give him a false sense of security. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2299 Looks like Pendragon took the parachute. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2300 Remember, son: exhibit humility, determination, and don’t let the board see you push the little button I showed you. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2301 I was certain that HR told me his name was Arthur King?! 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2302 Behold the desk of disillusionment. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2303 It's a tough hiring process, but then you get to rule with impunity. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2304 I hear it's a great job, but they're looking for a very specific candidate. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2305 Only the one true IT specialist can recover the file from that laptop. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2306 Is that a giant light switch in the corner? 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2307 Still no change since the morning of the inauguration. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2308 Gun Free Zone 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2309 Well if that isn't a power play, I'm not sure what is. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2310 It bears a strange inscription, "rotucesorP laicepS" 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2311 You'd have thought they'd make him prove he could really pull the thing out before giving him the corner office. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2312 The budget cuts were brutal. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2313 I got tired of calling references. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2314 Merlin, from HR, has convinced me to try a new interview technique --- works like a charm! 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2315 Yeah, Damocles gave his two weeks notice. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2316 Ms Lake left it in the desk. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2317 Halloween gets a little crazy around here. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2318 We're looking at external candidates because all of our VPs have double hernias. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2319 They tell me it's reclaimed wood from King Arthur's round table 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2320 I would have said pen as well. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2321 Our boss has ensured a fair hiring process, but it's obvious his son will pull the sword out in the end. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2322 We think creatively about 'skills and qualifications,' Tim. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2323 You'll work a lot of nights in shining armor. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2324 This application process is a bit archaic, don't you think? 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2325 Yes, it's our little tradition here at Excalibur Corp.--pull the sword from the desk and the job's yours. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2326 Or you could just request a stapler. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2327 Its really only the key to the executive wash room. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2328 Go get Arthur from accounting. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2329 The knight shift always leave the place in a right mess. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2330 He mumbled something about being the 'King of the North' and left. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2331 I hear they’re interviewing for Arthur’s job. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2332 Before the take-over they'd just send you a pink slip 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2333 Alternatively, feel free to submit a résumé. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2334 As advertised, we are seeking a “can-do” CEO. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2335 Psst, I'm pinned down under the desk. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2336 Pull it out and you're the CEO. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2337 It looks like the pen wasn't as mighty as we thought. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2338 It beats using the Electoral College system. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2339 They said the latest cuts will be to the bone. . . 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2340 We might be needing a round conference table. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2341 What a trooper. Bob still managed to fall on his sword right through the desk. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2342 Unlike his predecessor Arthur, Jennings simply was not of the same caliber. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2343 His secretary will only say "#metoo". 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2344 As I was saying, we are a legendary Corporation. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2345 I'd pull it out, but I hear the hours suck. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2346 I don't know -- Arthur of the Rectangular Table doesn't quite feel right! 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2347 I appreciate the effort, but you were supposed to fall on the pointy end. 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
2348 They say if you're able to remove it you become CEO. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2349 Well on second thought didn't you want to be boss? 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2350 Here's the IPO. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2351 Well, Arthur ... 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2352 Apparently, it’s impossible to hack. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2353 Well, at least he didn't get the axe. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2354 None of them have been able to pull it out during the probationary period. 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
2355 I hardly see the point. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2356 And this is our regional sales manager, Pierce. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2357 Better call Arty in maintenance. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2358 He was sure he was going to get the ax. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2359 Like I said, this one's fit for a king 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2360 We're gonna need a bigger scabbard 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2361 You could say he was sword of stoned when he did that. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2362 A pink slip works just as well and with a lot less drama 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2363 If you can pull the sword from the desk, the job's yours. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2364 Only the rightful CEO can remove it. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2365 Let's just wait for the maintenance staff. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2366 Look on the bright side: you get a desk and a sword. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2367 Oh great. They expect us to work knights. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2368 These office politics are getting medieval. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2369 All interns are given the opportunity to become a permanent employee. You might be the chosen one. You have three minutes; Go! 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2370 He loves roundtable discussions. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2371 It's hard to find employees of his Excaliber 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2372 What do you have to do for a corner office? 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2373 It's less litigious than the old hiring process. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2374 I never fully considered the down-side of a granite desktop. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2375 Means Trump rejects your facts. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2376 Your wife's divorce lawyer left a message. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2377 I hear the stockholders are looking for someone special. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2378 . . . and this is King Arthur's office. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2379 It started out as a letter opener. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2380 I know it’s old-fashioned, but hopefully this way we can find a CEO who hasn’t sexually harassed anyone. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2381 Don't talk nonsense Arthur, you're not ready for the corner office 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2382 Should we call Arthur? 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2383 Extract the sword, you're the true CEO. Or maybe you just get free parking, I can't remember. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2384 It's part of the vetting process. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2385 I suppose now is a good time to tell you about our 'two men enter, one man leaves' policy. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2386 CEO candidates get to this final step and it's then that we lose them. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2387 The key to longevity in this company is being as close to the sword as possible without actually being the one to pull it from the desk 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2388 I thought you said she'd been axed. 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
2389 Only the most worthy may remove the sword from the desk. Then place your memo over the hole, and re-insert the sword. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2390 And this is Arthur's desk. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2391 Don’t worry about pulling out the sword, just promise you won’t tweet! 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2392 Whoever pulls it out becomes editor. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2393 See you, Bro. I'm meeting Stormy Daniels at the Chez Gay. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2394 Now that they have computers, they don't need a letter opener anymore. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2395 Our hiring policy is fairly straightforward. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2396 Whoever draweth the sword is head of accounting. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2397 Okay, Art, let's keep this interview short and sweet. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2398 We like to keep things simple. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2399 What caliber? 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2400 New millennium Excalibur. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2401 You should have seen the size of the envelope. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2402 Next thing you know, he'll be installing a round table. Just sayin'. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2403 That's the one he fell on. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2404 This office belongs to Arthur, CEO of the Britons. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2405 We’re just waiting for the right candidate for CEO. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2406 Anyone who pulls the sword from the desk gets the corner office. 1.2326 0.06117 86 72 8 6
2407 I guess it's true. Damocles did quit. 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
2408 He always said he couldn't get a handle on the job. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2409 That’s pretty mighty, but I have a pen. 1.2326 0.06336 86 73 6 7
2410 It's a bit too large for a letter opener, but it gets the job done. 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
2411 Just one final test, and the job is yours. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2412 He needed more pull. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2413 Don't waste your time trying to pull it out. Just try to do your work without getting jabbed. 1.2326 0.05652 86 70 12 4
2414 Well, Bob, you're next to try for the corner office. 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2415 I miss the days when we were lobbying for gun control! 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2416 It's what human resources calls 'strike two.' 1.2317 0.04999 82 64 17 1
2417 They said cuts would start from the top down 1.2299 0.05092 87 69 16 2
2418 Apparently, the legend is that, if you can pull the sword out, you can’t get indicted for insider trading. 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2419 New boss. Not the same as the old boss. 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2420 He tries it every morning. 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2421 Good Knight! 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2422 Even though the point is under, it still gets across. 1.2299 0.05092 87 69 16 2
2423 It's my fantasy job. 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2424 #metoo? 1.2262 0.05179 84 67 15 2
2425 I don't know, it's hard enough to find someone who can pass the piss test. 1.2262 0.05706 84 69 11 4
2426 I’m still your boss if you pull it out. 1.2262 0.05706 84 69 11 4
2427 Apparently if you free it you get promoted to King. My bet's on Arthur 'cause he works a lot of knights. 1.2262 0.05179 84 67 15 2
2428 We are an equal opportunity employer. 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2429 We decided to simplify our intern selection process. 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2430 He also insisted the conference table be round. 1.2262 0.05706 84 69 11 4
2431 Have you tried restarting it? 1.2262 0.05706 84 69 11 4
2432 Guess what his password is? 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2433 You'll get a modest salary increase, box seats for the Yankees, and full dental benefits for a year. 1.2262 0.05706 84 69 11 4
2434 We've found two new VPs this way. And the best part is, no emails from bloody LinkedIn. 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2435 Legend has it you need two forms of I.D. to pull the sword 1.2262 0.04895 84 66 17 1
2436 The ex-CEO wasn't up to calibur. 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2437 According to legend, we've never had an accountant. 1.2250 0.05024 80 63 16 1
2438 It comes with the desk. Pull it out, and you get to sit in the chair. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2439 The prophesy is just to cover up race discrimination. 1.2250 0.05893 80 66 10 4
2440 He's on chivalry leave. 1.2247 0.05707 89 74 10 5
2441 So that's why they had PE at Harvard Business School. 1.2237 0.05493 76 61 13 2
2442 I'll flip you for who pushes it through. He's under the desk. 1.2237 0.05803 76 62 11 3
2443 Apparently the office furniture is having a #metoo moment. 1.2235 0.05888 85 71 9 5
2444 Our former Chairman, Arthur, left it for his successor. 1.2235 0.05391 85 69 13 3
2445 You say Mueller's on the way? 1.2222 0.05270 81 65 14 2
2446 You're going to have to work around some cuts. 1.2222 0.05270 81 65 14 2
2447 Office Depot Item #FJ734: Excalibur. 1.2222 0.04969 81 64 16 1
2448 This proves him wrong: The pen is not mightier than the sword, especially when you hide underneath your desk. 1.2222 0.05270 81 65 14 2
2449 ...And this is our succession plan 1.2222 0.04969 81 64 16 1
2450 Well- it could be just a suggestion. 1.2222 0.05827 81 67 10 4
2451 Yeah Roger is trying to delay the IPO again 1.2209 0.05072 86 69 15 2
2452 Inform the search firm that there is another requirement to add to the list. 1.2208 0.04758 77 60 17 0
2453 Caliburn industries is an equal opportunity employer Mr. Pendragon 1.2208 0.05104 77 61 15 1
2454 Unlike us, he is a frontstabber 1.2208 0.05735 77 63 11 3
2455 The first person who knows how to use a pen becomes CEO. 1.2195 0.05762 82 68 10 4
2456 The board is trying a less divisive hiring approach. 1.2195 0.04916 82 65 16 1
2457 Sword of Democracy. Pull it and you are President. 1.2195 0.05494 82 67 12 3
2458 Please don't say it. We know. 1.2179 0.05366 78 63 13 2
2459 So I guess we’re looking for a guy called Arthur.. 1.2179 0.05954 78 65 9 4
2460 He should never have hidden under his desk. 1.2179 0.05046 78 62 15 1
2461 King Arthur’s out of office message. 1.2179 0.06228 78 66 7 5
2462 I can't remember the password for either of them. 1.2179 0.06228 78 66 7 5
2463 Um...what did you say this meeting was about? 1.2179 0.05954 78 65 9 4
2464 It takes a special type of person to work here st Camelot Industries. 1.2179 0.05668 78 64 11 3
2465 Now that's what I call a sharply-worded memo! 1.2179 0.05668 78 64 11 3
2466 Is there anyone in the firm named Arthur? 1.2179 0.05954 78 65 9 4
2467 I hope you don't mind people putting their feet on your desk. 1.2179 0.05668 78 64 11 3
2468 Some of us would just quit, but Harry........... 1.2179 0.05668 78 64 11 3
2469 CEO? Just a little tug'll do it. 1.2179 0.05366 78 63 13 2
2470 Alternatively, we could look at your resume... 1.2179 0.05668 78 64 11 3
2471 No one has been able to pull it out so the CEO job remains empty. 1.2179 0.05954 78 65 9 4
2472 And we save thousands in headhunter fees alone! 1.2179 0.05366 78 63 13 2
2473 If you are truly the new Director of Marketing, you will be able to remove the laptop from the desk. 1.2179 0.05954 78 65 9 4
2474 SuperExcaliburifragilisticexpialidocious! 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2475 Maybe this hostile takeover talk was more than just rumors. 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2476 Bagged it on a safari in Disneyland. 1.2169 0.05698 83 69 10 4
2477 I’m looking forward to ‘Bring Your Child to Work Day’ this year. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2478 It's a big boy letter opener. 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2479 Hard to tell if we’ll ever get another boss with such a sharp edge... 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2480 You don't want to know where the shield ended up. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2481 Unlike your predecessor, we expect you to make your revenue numbers. 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2482 This may be a difficult transition. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2483 Whomsoever shall pull the Sword from this Desk, he shall be granted the Key to the Supply Room. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2484 Impressive, but his twitter finger is mightier. 1.2169 0.04863 83 66 16 1
2485 Johnson's sales tactics are the stuff of legend. 1.2169 0.05698 83 69 10 4
2486 Looks like we’re about to sever ties. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2487 That's what happens when you think the pen is mightier than the sword! 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2488 Arthur doesn’t believe in a 4 digit P.I.N. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2489 Well, no, obviously we *don't* use pink slips here in Sicily. 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2490 And of course you'll need to be familiar with MS Sword 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2491 Legend says if you get it out you become Senior Intern. 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2492 He said to hold all his calls; now we know why. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2493 Desk jobs are a killer. 1.2169 0.04863 83 66 16 1
2494 that's nothing; his pen went through the floor 1.2169 0.05698 83 69 10 4
2495 Looks like the barbarians are back at the gate again. 1.2169 0.05950 83 70 8 5
2496 No one even wants to try and be king, these days. 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2497 I knew the granite desk was a mistake. 1.2169 0.04551 83 65 18 0
2498 And if you pull the sword out you still start in the mailroom. 1.2169 0.05698 83 69 10 4
2499 Do you think the takeover was a bit too hostile? 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2500 I think he went out to get some WD-40. 1.2169 0.05950 83 70 8 5
2501 The HR wizard said,"Only the true heir can reclaim it." 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2502 Maybe Trump's fixer Michael Cohen thought this was Mueller's desk. 1.2152 0.06155 79 67 7 5
2503 We are still looking for someone that can turn the company around. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2504 See, your letter opener is on your desk like I said. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2505 Cripes! I prepared for an interview. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2506 It is written, “he who rends this sword shall the rightful CEO become”. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2507 No, it’s actually quite loose, but nobody will touch it. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2508 The previous employee failed to pass the last test for promotion. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2509 There's one round table version but that's in the oval office. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2510 We're not sure who put it there, but no one is able to pull it out. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2511 He tried to set the bar high for his successor, but instead he took off his left kneecap." 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2512 Everyone lies on their resume. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2513 Some guy named Wotan left it. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2514 ...oh, and don't forget to dial 9 first. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2515 I feel like I really dodged a sword today at the office. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2516 He took his pen. This must be serious. 1.2152 0.06413 79 68 5 6
2517 "After the interview, I heard a guy named Galahad got the job". 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2518 What did you say was mightier than the sword? 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2519 Working in H.R. is not for everyone. 1.2152 0.06155 79 67 7 5
2520 The CEO must not only be able to remove Excalibur from the granite top desk, but the sword also doubles as the sole Executive Wash Room key. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2521 Boss said whoever can pull out the sword is the new CEO 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2522 Maybe we should give women a shot. 1.2152 0.06155 79 67 7 5
2523 He who pulls the sword shall be the assistant to the executive vice president of the Northeastern marketing branch. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2524 ...for whosoever pulleth the sword, least share price rise less than 30 points by Q3, so shall he fall upon it. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2525 How was I supposed to know she had a husband? 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2526 The old way to choose the president just didn't work out well. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2527 Hurry, go get Arthur in accounting 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2528 We've all tried, Arthur, but it appears to be stuck. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2529 Either you pull the sword from the desk or figure out how to link subscriptions to the app... I’d try the sword first. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2530 The computer is more powerful than the sword but only if you can pull the password out of the desk. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2531 We do things a little differently here at Excalibur. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2532 Arthur thought it would be a novel way to choose his successor. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2533 Stevens is the CEO. You don't want to mess with him. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2534 If you cant pull the sword, or guess the password, you can call and ask a friend. 1.2152 0.06155 79 67 7 5
2535 I think I'd feel more comfortable if he took a seat. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2536 We're still searching for a CEO who can pull the sword out of the ironwood desk. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2537 Here's you new V.P. office. Congratulations, and may you aspire to further greatness. 1.2152 0.04653 79 62 17 0
2538 You have to admit he knew how to drive his point home. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2539 Well, Sir, our Founders placed it there to remind our leaders of the importance of authenticity. You know: Truth, Justice, and--whatever. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2540 So whoever can get that out is the next boss? 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2541 It may be a while to fine the next CEO 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2542 I guess he took it as a sign and left early today. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2543 Guess Arthur decided to pursue bigger things. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2544 Not just proven executive material. We need legendary. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2545 I told you Arthur's letter opener was over the top. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2546 He who lives by the sword, dies under his desk. 1.2152 0.06155 79 67 7 5
2547 I guess he couldn't find a pen. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2548 Do we have an employee named Arthur? 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2549 See? Only the biggest fan gets a life-sized, life-threatening letter opener like that. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2550 Let's get Lancelot in here. 1.2152 0.06155 79 67 7 5
2551 For the "once and future king" of Manhattan 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2552 We needed assorted desks, but thanks to auto correct we have this. 1.2152 0.06413 79 68 5 6
2553 It stays there until Game of Thrones returns. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2554 Our interview process is fairly straightforward. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2555 It was revenge for eating Arthur’s last pudding in the work fridge. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2556 Pull it out and you get to be head of the accounting department. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2557 Yes, you would think OSHA would have a problem with this. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2558 We'll be saved once Mueller pulls it out. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2559 We used to use some farcical aquatic ceremony to determine succession, but we've found this modern method to be much more efficient. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2560 Let's hope that will cut the crap! 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2561 Can you ask Arthur to step in here for a moment. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2562 We're being taken over by Adventure Capitalists. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2563 Well, Art, are you up to the job? 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2564 HR had it installed to cut down on the duration of job interviews. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2565 Let's call it a knight. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2566 A round table would have been more in order. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2567 He wants to hold more round-tables too. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2568 We play epic Rock, Paper, Scissors in this office. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2569 Got you working the knight shift, huh? 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2570 It's Arthur's performance piece, "The Sword in the Desk." 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2571 The board asked him for a succession strategy. This one’s magic! 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2572 I think 'disgruntled' might be putting it mildly. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2573 Tell Damocles down in H.R. we've found his sword. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2574 We may not need an executive recruiter to replace the old bastard after all. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2575 No actually we use it to hire janitors. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2576 It's a new form of stress relief. Those squishy things just don't do it for me. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2577 we've all tried Artie....its impossible 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2578 This is just one reason why I prefer a standing desk. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2579 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise CEO. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2580 If you can pull it out you become CEO 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2581 Congratulations on winning the job. Now there is one more thing... 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2582 The one who draws the sword shall lead meetings at a large round table. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2583 Merlin is up to his old tricks. Alas, the Donald is no Arthur. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2584 You'd better call the knight manager. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2585 The board thought our last CEO was ex caliber 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2586 Hiding under your desk is not an viable work avoidance option here. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2587 This is Stan's office. The lawyers have an inflated view of what they bring to the company. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2588 Well, now we know why this office is still unoccupied. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2589 I see that he went to Camelot. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2590 Pull it out of the desk and the company is all yours. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2591 He gets a lot of oversized mail. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2592 We've been telling Arthur to pull it out for years 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2593 We're traditionalists when it comes to middle-management recruiting. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2594 He who can remove the sword is destined to receive an additional bonus when the company goes under. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2595 And then he said, "May Heaven strike me down if I misled a single investor." 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2596 So this is what he meant by a late knight. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2597 Our firm's idea of a succession plan. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2598 I think it makes a bold, muscular statement, but your color palette needs tweaking . 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2599 Let's make sure he's not under the desk. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2600 I guess the pen isn’t mightier after all. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2601 It means he needs to get a round table ASAP. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2602 This is the last part of the interview. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2603 Succeed and you shall be hailed Arthur, Head of Human Resouces. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2604 Interesting succession plan... 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
2605 Mr. Arthur, the office is yours after we remove Mr. Excalibur's stuff. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2606 Here at King Arthur Inc., we have a different take on performance reviews. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2607 They gave Bob a square desk, but he's holding out for a round table. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2608 Well, he did say to stick a knife in this job. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2609 That'll make succession planning a challenge 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2610 The new CEO sure has us on the cutting edge. 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
2611 Legends say that the person who finally pulls it out will become the new C.E.O. 1.2125 0.05817 80 67 9 4
2612 This will simplify succession planning. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2613 LIMERICK: "Greetings and welcome aboard...Here's your office, your desk, and your sword...Meetings start at nine...Be sure you're on time...And refer to Mr. Zinke as "my lord"." 1.2125 0.06338 80 69 5 6
2614 It's HR reminding me what might happen if I skip the sexual harassment training. 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
2615 Whoever can pull it out gets this corner office. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2616 The Lady was not amused. 1.2125 0.05817 80 67 9 4
2617 Whosoever draws this forth shall become the POTUS 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2618 We use it for succession planning. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2619 Back in the day we drew a line in the sand 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2620 And here is where the Chief Excalibur Officer sits. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2621 Hiding under the desk did him no good at all. 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
2622 Tis said, he who draws the sword t'will be CEO. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2623 Damn O'Cles! 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2624 Apparently just submitting a resume is no longer enough. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2625 The CFO is trying something new: the employee who draws the sword from this desk gets to keep his pension. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2626 They say the pen is mightier than the sword. But, frankly, Jones, I've always had my doubts. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2627 Otherwise it is a rather neat desk. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2628 ``... and whosoever pulleth out this letter-opener from this desk is the rightful CEO of Round Table Holdings Inc." 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2629 How will I know if I am right for the position? 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2630 After a week of trying to yank it out he gave up—joined the NRA and bought an AR-15. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2631 In the old days you got the axe. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2632 ...it's just the best predictor of success HR ever found. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2633 Apparently, the shareholders think this will help us find "the true CEO." 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2634 A succession plan of a sort I guess. 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
2635 Artie, it's your turn to try. 1.2125 0.04602 80 63 17 0
2636 The note says,'Pull me out, win this seat!' 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2637 If Arthur wanted a standing desk he could've just asked. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2638 Ikea calls this desk, 'Arthur Modern.' Hope you like it. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2639 Well, I did use Merlin to get the job interview.... 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2640 When you're done here Mr. Damocles would like to see you. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2641 Looks like Arthur isn't in right now. 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
2642 New boss starts his day as King Arthur. Head of R&D thinks he's Merlin. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2643 He's got an extreme taste in executive stress toys. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2644 There's simply not a more congenial spot for happily-ever-aftering than here at Excaliber, Inc. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2645 The desk is made of granite. I have no idea what the sword thing is all about. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2646 Well, he sure made his point. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2647 I don't really know what the Excalibur account is, but Aurthur said he would pull it out after his webinar with Merlin. 1.2125 0.05817 80 67 9 4
2648 We're streaming the hostile takeover. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2649 You know the old saying, "Live by the Sword"..... 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2650 Whoever draws the sword from the desk, they shall have this office, for only then can the desk drawer be opened. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2651 This is the office of our CEO, Arthur. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2652 I assume this means we're looking for a new CEO. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2653 We have a good feeling about this, Mr. Whoso. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2654 So once you get settled into your new office, we have a meeting in the round table conference room. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2655 I warned him, you keep eating other people's lunches, and this is what happens. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2656 Unfortunately, it means he only brought his pen to the duel. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2657 At least it's better than nepotism. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2658 It's supposed to represent Excalibur, but mostly we use it as a paper cutter. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2659 Mueller left without it ? 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2660 The sword's still there, yet they let him be president." 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2661 There was no heir apparent. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2662 Again? 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2663 This might be a hostile takeover. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2664 Apparently that’s what a CV is 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2665 Did I mention that the fate of the civilized world depends on you? 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2666 While you were out. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2667 Guess Art decided to try another career. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2668 They’re gone, Sir. Your feint worked! 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2669 The culture is killed or be killed. I'm guessing you can figure out what happened to the last guy. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2670 Good ol’ nepotism is just easier on the furniture 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2671 Rod Serling's voice over familar music, " new hire Arthur King sees his office for the first time at Camelot technology". 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2672 This your chance to be CEO. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2673 Wow, she's really upset about having to chip in for coffee. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2674 We have a 'sword in the stone' based promotion system here. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2675 For some reason, we've had a hard time finding the right person for the job. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2676 This will be the first phase of the interview process. 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2677 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise the new CEO 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2678 We are trying to help Robert kick the habit of sleeping under his desk all day. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2679 Welcome to Camelot, Sir! 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2680 Where did you get that loan from again? 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2681 I told you it was mightier than the pen. 1.2105 0.04708 76 60 16 0
2682 Nancy, would you ask Merlin to come up from H.R.? 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2683 Dammit Dave, it’s supossed to be a round table. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2684 Missed the point. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2685 Excuse me Mr. Excalibur, this is Steve... he just started today. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2686 We only have one applicant so far. Some kid named Arthur. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2687 The board recommended jousting to choose the CEO. We thought this might be better. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2688 When I told him to take a good stab at his new job, I didn’t think he would take it literally! 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2689 It must have been her ex. 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2690 Okay, Arthur, your promotion comes down to this. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2691 How long has the CEO position been open? 12 years now. They say the only way to get the position is to pull the sword from Rick's old desk. Working for White Castle is wierd, yeah? 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2692 the pen may not be mightier after all. 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2693 Hey Art, can you give me a hand with this? 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2694 Better call Arthur 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2695 It’s actually quite easy to pull out, but no one wants to work in the chain mail room. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2696 WOW! THIS IS NOT HOW I ENVISIONED THE ROUNDTABLE! 1.2105 0.06574 76 66 4 6
2697 Found it! 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2698 The search for the new VP is taking longer than we thought. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2699 The final test is if you remove the sword you get the job as CEO 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2700 I see that Jeff Bezos just up and quit. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2701 We’re not backstabbers here. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2702 Our last CEO was literally legendary. 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2703 Who put that phone on my desk? 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2704 I guess they really did cut his position. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2705 The desk had so many enemies, any one of us could have done it. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2706 He said, "The hell with it, I'm leaving. Let some kid take the job." 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2707 They said Merlin quit, but I had to see it to believe it. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2708 I thought it'd be bigger. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2709 The President thinks this is a better approach than asking for Senate confirmation. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2710 We asked the President to stop hiding under his desk. 1.2105 0.04708 76 60 16 0
2711 And I thought the joke was: "pull my finger." 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2712 Another headcount reduction. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2713 I don’t know, man...the last guy who pulled it out lost his job. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2714 I know it's a foregone conclusion that Arthur will become CEO when his dad retires, but I think the board might want something more official. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2715 And that's how I stay interim CEO forever. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2716 Perhaps we shouldn't have laid off Arthur... 1.2105 0.06574 76 66 4 6
2717 ExcaliBoss! 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2718 If you are able to pull it out, you'll be crowned King of Disposable middle men. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2719 This is our new succession plan. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2720 Welcome aboard the failing Medieval Times 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2721 The CEO before him was axed. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2722 The board's trying everything to find our next CEO. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2723 Nobody's been able to use the desk since Arthur left 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2724 We've tried voting, but we found this method works better for everyone. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2725 I couldn't pull it out. Why don't you give it a try, Arthur? 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2726 What a final statement. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2727 Call in the next candidate. Poor guy, it's getting harder and harder to get tenure. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2728 Subject to Board approval, of course. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2729 The sword of Damocles got him even hiding under his desk. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2730 You’re from the mailroom? Good luck with that. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2731 Five executive recruiters and we still can't find the one who is supposed to pull the damn thing out. 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2732 Dont do it,that little guy Art, from the mailroom got fired for that 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2733 So, Artie, you think a lowly night clerk can pull the letter opener from the stone-top desk? Go ahead, but I warn you: many have tried and all have failed. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2734 ... and here's your new office, Arthur. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2735 Legend has it that whosoever is able to remove that letter opener from the desk gets the job..... 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2736 It's a knightime activity. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2737 It’s another way of Trump not being able to say “You’re fired.” 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2738 In your job description, this falls under 'Other duties as assigned.' 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2739 Since the scandal nobody is trying to pull it out. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2740 Well, Jenkins, just one more hurdle and that key to the executive washroom is all yours. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2741 Be my guest. I don't want the job. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2742 And that’s Arthur's desk... OK. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2743 I'm told that if you can pull it out, you are named the new CEO. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2744 Send for the Princes. We've got to settle this Charles or William thing. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2745 When you asked for feedback, how did you phrase it? 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2746 Merlin favors a very old-fashioned approach to hiring 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2747 Can't we just move the desk? 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2748 It's tough becoming president of Medieval Times. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2749 I see we are invoking the succession plan for CEO. Care to give it a whirl? 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2750 The search committee is getting a bit frustrated. 1.2105 0.04708 76 60 16 0
2751 Nobody can hack our authentication protocol. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2752 It's 30x60 and solid as a rock. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2753 Merlin says never mind about soliciting resumes. 1.2105 0.04708 76 60 16 0
2754 Pull it and become CEO, or does the desk just fart? 1.2105 0.04708 76 60 16 0
2755 Just one last thing before you can sign you on... 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2756 The board wants a strong charismatic leader. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2757 Congratulations on being a finalist. You have one minute. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2758 This is why you're here. We sent the last guy to anger management. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2759 That wizard seemed to think that this would be a tough position to staff. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2760 I'm not touching that! 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2761 It’s safe to say our board of directors has a somehwat dated process for choosing CEOs. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2762 We let Donald into this room when he wants bomb a country 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2763 At least you didn't get the axe. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2764 You won't become CEO if you pull the sword out, if that's what you're thinking. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2765 We’ve had some vacancies recently. It turns out not everyone is willing to take the loyalty oath and fall on their sword. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2766 I always wondered about Arthur's management style. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2767 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise CEO of all employees. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2768 Makes choosing the next Chairman pretty straight forward. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2769 HR determine it wasn't personal, so working from home is not an option. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2770 We all told Arthur a nameplate would be more practical. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2771 I hear it’s an alternative credentialing system. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2772 I admire your creativity, I’m just concerned HR may take issue with how you’re awarding promotions. 1.2105 0.04708 76 60 16 0
2773 It only gets in the way when signing multiple Executive Orders. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2774 The company is yours if you do just one thing. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2775 If you can pull it out, you're divinely appointed to cut salaries. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2776 And that's why Pendragon, Morganstern and Smith still doesn't have a Managing Partner. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2777 The legend says the one person to remove the sword from this desk gets the corner office! 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2778 This method of attaining a promotion is positively medieval. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2779 And this is what you have to do to get a promotion around here. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2780 It's not perfect but it eliminated that whole interview and reference check rigamarole. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2781 Excaliber is at it again. Call Arthur in maintenance. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2782 I'd really like to know whether it's Arthur's or Damocles'. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2783 The 2016 election revealed the need for new criteria for becoming President. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2784 Here at Excalibur Inc., we select our leaders the old fashion way 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2785 With our financial situation, the problem is no one actually wants to pull the sword from the desk. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2786 "You pull it out. I don't want to be Trump! 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2787 I guess that's why he got the stone bench top 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2788 I suppose we should get Arthur. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2789 Welcome! I believe you understand our expectations? 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2790 I think the Lady of the Lake just made a big mistake. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2791 In short, there's simply not a more congenial spot. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2792 Thank god! I was afraid he wasn't going to leave us a succession plan. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2793 I'd sooner write a winning caption. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2794 They say the previous guy was a financial wizard. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2795 And now to the final stage of your interview. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2796 you go get that sord out of the desk and I'll get some coffee 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2797 After extensive deliberation the Board of Directors voted unanimously to select our new CEO the old-fashioned way. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2798 Sometimes the sword is mightier than the Pendragon. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2799 Performance reviews get more archaic every year. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2800 Well, Arthur? Can you help me? 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2801 The job is your if you can pull the sword out. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2802 Is this a dagger I see before me--the handle towards my hand? 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2803 If you can pull it out, you become the new U.S. Attorney for the Southern District. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2804 They say whoever can pull it out gets to be the next CEO. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2805 I didn't know Jeff Sessions is a fencer! 1.2105 0.06301 76 65 6 5
2806 I guess that ends the "there are no bad ideas" policy. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2807 Who can lead the Knights of the square desk? 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2808 Can someone tell Arthur to clean up after himself. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2809 As you know, the job has been vacant for some time, but we’re looking to hire on the spot. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2810 And this is Art Pendragon's office. He's at a Round Table discussion this afternoon. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2811 The consultant said our hiring process may be too selective. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2812 Yup, it's excalibur. I'd try, but it comes with ownership of Britain. Not fun, what with Brexit, y'now? 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2813 We're having trouble filling this position. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2814 The decorator said the style was Arthur deco . 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2815 Legend says that whoever removes the sword shall be Assistant Regional Manager 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2816 Looks like a Remington .45 Excaliber. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2817 Sir, we need a pen! 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2818 Human resources is trying to simplify the hiring process. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2819 No pens allowed 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2820 So all I have to do is remove the Sword, and I get the job? 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2821 He lost out to a real corporate warrior. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2822 Looks like he was on the wrong side of the "pen is mightier than the sword" debate. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2823 The Selection Committee takes a traditional approach . . . 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2824 It's a different approach to hiring upper management. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2825 Time was when the pen was mightier than the sword. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2826 Even when he's outside DC, it's always about him. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2827 I know it is unusual, but we are looking for the right candidate. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2828 Alright Arthur, you're up. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2829 The sword has gotten rusty because no one wants the job. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2830 The winning candidate for CEO has to pull it out successfully. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2831 When Arthur burst in, the boss hid under his desk. He chose ... poorly. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2832 Whosoever draws the sword from the desk shall be king... of the seventh floor. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2833 Don’t worry. The last guy wasn’t born for this either. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2834 No men on the board will touch it and they daren't let any women in the room. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2835 Whoever can draw the sword out, is the true and eternal leader of this corporation provided the Board and the Bankruptcy court approve. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2836 The CEO chair has been empty for a decade. It's yours if you can remove that damn sword. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2837 Come on Arthur, don’t you think it’s time you finally applied yourself? 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2838 Whoever can pull it out gets Friday off. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2839 Requests for pay increases have really dropped off. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2840 I predict it will be a young nerd with an app. 1.2099 0.05187 81 66 13 2
2841 Now then, on to the matter of your severance package... 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2842 We'll start with the leadership test and then we'll move on to the math quiz 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2843 You're an editor now, son!. Just pull it out and remove the body beneath. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2844 Good luck Arthur! You pull that out, you are the next CEO. 1.2078 0.04654 77 61 16 0
2845 Looks like a sword but it's the ax 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2846 Seems Brad had a poetic side. Who knew? 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2847 I guess they found out I'm a duel citizen. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2848 This desk job was killing me. So I killed it. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2849 They say only a true accountant can remove it. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2850 I know that you want to pull it out; but he said, push it to the right, to close the shade. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2851 Well Arthur, I guess we're about to find out if all that pull you claim to have around the office is just a myth 1.2078 0.06494 77 67 4 6
2852 And the challenge, should you accept it, starts here. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2853 The Board figured this couldn't be any worse than the last five CEO's they hired. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2854 We just can't seem to find any qualified candidates 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2855 Well Arthur, why don’t you give it a go? 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2856 How would you like to move out of the mailroom, Art? 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2857 Goddamnit Jeff- I asked for an Excel calendar, not the Excalibur. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2858 " Hate to disappoint her, but tell that dyslexic lady Guinevere her new boss is Arthur King ". 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2859 Does someone named Arthur work here? 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2860 Now that’s lousy succession planning. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2861 "He stuck it in the desk and quickly packed up his boxes. Thought I heard him say, "good luck filling the position"..... 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2862 I'd rather pull your finger. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2863 I guess he took Sun Tzu to literally, this time. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2864 He tweeted he will be crowned king once he pulls it out. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2865 Is the pen mightier than the sword? 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2866 I think the office cleaning crew want a pay increase. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2867 This is the part they don't teach you at Harvard Business School. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2868 Remember Art, heavy is the head that wears the crown. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2869 I asked my assistant for a letter opener, and this is what he brought me. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2870 He who can draw the sword from the particle board desk will be the king of all mid-Atlantic distribution. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2871 We are still waiting for the next CEO of Camelot Incorporated. You're welcome to try! 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2872 Looks like the new CEO is going to need more than an MBA. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2873 There’s just one last thing before we walk down to HR. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2874 My secretary put it there as a reminder. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2875 "The boss isn't happy he has to wait until next year for "Game of Thrones". 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2876 The legend in the prospectus holds that, "He who pulls the sword from the CEO desk earns 275 times that of the average worker." 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2877 Whosoever draws the sword from the desk become the new CEO... 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2878 Whoso pullest our this sword from this desk and workstation, shall be rightwise senior comptroller, born of all accounting. 1.2078 0.06494 77 67 4 6
2879 I could give it a try, but doI really want to be President? 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2880 The Human Resources department has gone Game of Thrones on us. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2881 We've streamlined our interview process. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2882 I can’t remember the password to get it out. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2883 We take equal opportunity seriously. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2884 It's the only way to get a promotion. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2885 Why don't you give it a shot, Arthur? 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2886 They set the bar pretty high for THIS job. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2887 It's the new CEO succession plan. Just pull out the sword and the job is yours. 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2888 I think you'll be a good fit here, Arthur 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2889 HR can't find anyone pure of heart. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2890 I wonder if he would have been happier with a round table. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2891 It’s not really Excalibur, but it keeps the summer interns motivated. 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2892 It's been 13 weeks now. Maybe we should reconsider our vetting process. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2893 The standard paperweght was simply inadequate. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2894 So do you think you can help me out, Arthur? 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2895 All you have to do is pull that sword out and the job is yours.We call it Excalibrate. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2896 A six figure salary and the use of a company car sounds nice, but can I keep the sword too? 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2897 Our succession planning is positively medieval. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2898 I'm OK with whoever can withdraw the sword becoming our next CEO, its Merlin that I worry about. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2899 Personnel says that whomever can remove it gets a key to the executive washroom. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2900 Don't get your hopes up- it's just a letter opener. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2901 I was sort of hoping for Guenivere. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2902 According to legend, he who removes it gets keycard access to the executive washroom. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2903 We're still looking. So far no one is qualified for the job. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2904 It's ever harder finding somebody who'll put up with my near-constant sexual harassment. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2905 Wonder what she does when she looses a case. 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2906 Turns out some skills don't translate. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2907 He was known for his penetrating insights. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2908 Your hiring process is medieval 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2909 oh, you haven't heard? Grimes is dating Elon Musk. 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2910 Obviously we've had a lot of turnover for this position 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2911 You've aced the first 10 interviews. There's just one more thing before the desk is yours. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2912 Live by the sword, die by the sword! Can I have his office? 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2913 Our recruitment process is somewhat medieval. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2914 They say whoever can pull it out is the rightful born head of Accounting. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2915 Interesting password protector! 1.2078 0.04654 77 61 16 0
2916 The one who pulls it out becomes CEO. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2917 He must be with Merlin. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2918 The last guy had a round table, but we can get you any shape you want. 1.2078 0.04654 77 61 16 0
2919 And to think, this used to be a meritocracy. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2920 Your interview is going to be interactive. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2921 Looks like you might have the edge, Artie. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2922 Legal said we needed an unbiased way to select the CEO. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2923 All Arthur ever wanted was to be remembered 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2924 You see Bill, whoever pulls it out gets to be work for Trump. Nobody had tried yet 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2925 I'll miss his work ethic. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2926 looks like Arthur didn't get his promotion. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2927 Most of us prefer to keep a lower profile. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2928 It’s your deskiny. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2929 Why didn't you throw it when he was at his desk? 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2930 Oh, the sword slides right out. The truth is, it's an impossible job, and the pay stinks. HR thought this would convince someone they were born to it. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2931 This is the part that's been a problem for the other applicants. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2932 As you can see, the search committee has streamlined its process. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2933 Quick, get that new intern from marketing. They call him "Wart" or "Art" or something like that. 1.2078 0.04654 77 61 16 0
2934 I guess they were wrong! 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2935 I'll call Art from Maintenance. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2936 Legend has it that he who can draw the sword gets an allocated parking space. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2937 You will find we have traditional opportunities for advancement. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2938 Before giving it a shot, Arthur, you need to know that there's a LOT more to being the head of Human Resources than just pulling a sword out of a desk. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2939 I think the CEO selection committee is getting a little carried away. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2940 Oh, that's just Merlin our IT guy's way of welcoming you to the office. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2941 He who draws the sword from the desk will be the new Account Manager. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2942 We've experienced a lot of difficulty filling Arthur's position. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2943 McKinsey's idea. Seems we need a very special person at the top. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2944 The last CEO put it there. Pull it out, and the job is all yours. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2945 The board must be getting serious about accountability 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2946 That must have been some huge olive. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2947 Hey, it beats 'Pull my finger'. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2948 He thinks "King" sounds better than "CEO". 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2949 It keeps my grand kids quiet. 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2950 Legend has it that whoever pulls the sword from the desk becomes VP of sales. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2951 He couldn’t get the sword out of the stone, so he bought the stone from the Abbey. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2952 "Pure of heart" probably wasn't the most logical choice for a necessary CEO skill. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2953 Excalibur Interior Decorators did my office. They cut the best deal. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2954 I see it as more of a double-edged sword. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2955 Looks like he needed a bigger letter opener 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2956 He'd forget his armor if it weren't fastened on. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2957 A plowshare, might send a different message 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2958 My money's on Arthur in customer service. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2959 Our CEO is rather old-fashioned when it comes to succession planning. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2960 That's quite a letter opener you've got there, Arthur. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2961 The last employee to have a performance review had some strong feeling. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2962 If it feels like it's coming out, I'll take over. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2963 In truth, 'tis a rather swordid tale... 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2964 The note said if you can pull the sword out of your desk, you can keep your job. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2965 ICE did it. They took Damocles away. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2966 Ledgend has it, at one time it was used to open things called “Letters”. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2967 Whoever pulls it out gets the laptop and his wife 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2968 Oh good, they sorted it out. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2969 As you can see, this job requires more than just a master's degree. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2970 If only he had had a pen. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2971 Old school...yet effective! 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2972 Looks like the counter offer from Pendragon, LLC came in. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2973 This CEO of legend thing isn't working out 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2974 I would call it unpassive aggression message. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2975 Dame Edith found out about the corporate retreat. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2976 Whoever pulls it out becomes CEO. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2977 Has any one seen Costanza? 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2978 Promotions don't come easy. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2979 Hiding under the table won't save you from getting stabbed. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2980 Sure it's the legendary way to pick the new CEO, but I think guessing the correct internet password would be more more relevant today. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2981 And we thought he left without a succession plan. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2982 He fancies himself a King McArthur Fellow. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2983 Whoso pulleth out the sword from the desk, taketh desk apart, and reassemble it, using only the sword as a tool, is right wise King born of all IKEA. 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2984 So, you think you can be CEO of Excalibur Corporation? 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2985 HR decided to dispense with the interviews. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2986 I told HR my name was Arthur, but I did not expect this. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2987 We weren't kidding, it takes a lot to get promoted to the corner office. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2988 The Board decided to acutely narrow the qualifications for the next CEO. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2989 So, THAT'S why the conference room table is round. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2990 So let's talk about that raise... 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2991 It's an upsell at Ikea. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2992 It looks to me like he took off with the coin and the crown. 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2993 Sir, the only person who hasn't tried is the young woman in the mailroom. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2994 The Oracle of Omaha devises an ingenious new way to choose his successor. 1.2078 0.06225 77 66 6 5
2995 According to the company bylaws, whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise entitled to their own parking space. 1.2055 0.04762 73 58 15 0
2996 He also wants us to start calling him Your Highness 1.2055 0.05503 73 60 11 2
2997 So far, the 'Sexcalibur" sword keeps latent misogynists from gaining power. 1.2055 0.04762 73 58 15 0
2998 Forget the symbolism, it's just a big letter opener. 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
2999 Hillary thought the desk was assigned to her, but... 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
3000 The time has come... 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
3001 J wonder, if I pull it out do I get to take over as C.E.O. of Camelot, Inc.? 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
3002 No, there's no king, but there is an opening in Finance. 1.2051 0.04950 78 63 14 1
3003 Well, he has certainly thrown down the gauntlet. 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
3004 He’s currently on a retreat with the Middle Managers of the Round Table. 1.2051 0.05873 78 66 8 4
3005 Since he named himself Emperor, he needed something dramatic that would play to his base. 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
3006 Would you rather read a stack of resumes? 1.2051 0.05873 78 66 8 4
3007 Whosoever is the intern who pulls the sword from my desk will sit at my desk and guard my desk during my lunch hour. 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
3008 Do you notice anything out of place? 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3009 Our promotion policy is fairly medieval. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3010 It's an old hiring process 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3011 I think the new guys name is Arthur 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3012 I guess he didn't read the terms & conditions 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3013 The resume approach was not working so.....who ever pulls out the sword gets to be the CEO. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3014 We knew he was quitting, but this is a bit dramatic. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3015 A specific skill set is required for an office with a window. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3016 A security cam shows who tries to pull it out to become CEO. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3017 Every time Arthur doesn't like the quarterly numbers, he says he's done and puts it back... 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3018 They're acting like I knew I was downloading a virus. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3019 He's out getting his knees bandaged up. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3020 "Nothing legendary here. Just playing magician with the intern when something went terribly wrong". 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3021 When I heard the staff referring to the new CEO as king Arthur, I thought they meant his supercilious, condescending and pedantic attitude. 1.2027 0.06376 74 64 5 5
3022 He didn't get as many likes as he thought he deserved. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3023 I tried to get it out but pulled a hamstring. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3024 We used to do a panel interview. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3025 Apparently, it glows blue if you're about to get laid off. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3026 It's part of the CEO hiring process. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3027 HR never was subtle. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3028 It’s for the next time the court jester wins the Electoral College. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3029 I guess the sword really is stronger than the pen. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3030 . . . he who would be King . . . . 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3031 And this is how we weed out the unworthy applicants. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3032 I guess he'll never hide under his desk again. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3033 Thank heavens, he took the dragon! 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3034 Whoso puellth out the sword of this desk becomes the righteous king of accounts payable. 1.2027 0.06376 74 64 5 5
3035 They call it exec-caliber. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3036 I heard management was making cuts but I didn't know they were using swords. 1.2027 0.06376 74 64 5 5
3037 "It's only simulated granite, but pulling it out is still pretty hard". 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3038 The last guy fell on the sword. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3039 Whoso pulls out this sword gets the office with the view. 1.2027 0.04705 74 59 15 0
3040 It didn’t protect him from the board. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3041 It is said that he who draws the sword from the desk becomes CEO 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3042 As Assistant to the Vice President for Finance, your job will center on maintaining his calendar and slaying rivals. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3043 So much for asking for a raise. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3044 Looks like a real desk job, Detective. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3045 He always had a penchant for drama. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3046 "If you can pull it out, the desk plays 'Camelot'. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3047 Not falling for it, Merlin. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3048 Word around the office is he didn't leave a resignation letter. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3049 Arthur! Arthur! 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3050 Whomsoever pulls it out is in charge of strategic alignment. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3051 Magical thinking can sometimes work in this position. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3052 "They've decided it's the only way we're going to get a new CEO". 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3053 Well Arthur, I guess now's your excalibur moment. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3054 He's gone for a Big Mac before he tries to pull it out. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3055 Okay Arthur, just one last interview question 1.2027 0.06376 74 64 5 5
3056 Round, rectangular, does it really matter, Arthur? You're still the 'King' of the company. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3057 We've gotten a few strong resumés but you can never tell until the interview. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3058 Hostile takeovers never end well. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3059 We encourage office drama. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3060 Looks like Arthur is working the knight shift again. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3061 We believe the sword is mightier than the pen. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3062 Unfortunately, the last five CEOs couldn't pull it out either, but that still got one heck of severance package. 1.2027 0.06376 74 64 5 5
3063 The envelope is in our warehouse. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3064 Legend has it that whosoever frees the sovereign's sword from his desk will be granted two weeks vacation. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3065 He couldn’t find a round table. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3066 Noone has ever been promoted. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3067 Never let them see you sleeping under your desk. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3068 We're looking for the next leader of the IT Dept. Give it a tug. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3069 It's his new magic trick,sword swallowing under the desk! 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3070 He forgot to email the corporate dragon. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3071 It was priced As Is 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3072 I love the view. I have mixed feelings on the decor. 1.2027 0.04705 74 59 15 0
3073 None of the VPs can budge it. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3074 Drat! Looks like Arthur is off on another one of his crusades. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3075 We think you’re the best candidate. Just one last thing and the job’s yours. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3076 Impressive, but for this application I still think the pen is mightier 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3077 Unfortunately Donald Trump couldn't pull it out, so he decided to become president instead. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3078 Whosoever can draw the sword shall be the one true CEO. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3079 Your resume only get you so far, Arthur. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3080 Secretary Damocles? Haven’t seen him since this morning’s Twitter feed. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3081 "Excalibur" is the the new operating system for the office computers now. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3082 Didn't give Dirk those vacation hours, did ya? 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3083 Are you feeling lucky, punk? 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3084 He didn’t quit soon enough. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3085 Let’s just burn the desk. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3086 We are moving away from assigned seating. Some people still cling to the past. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3087 There it is... The Excelcalibur. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3088 We misssed him. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3089 We're currently looking for a new Knight manager. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3090 We're hoping the next CEO can find the "Holy Grail of Economy." 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3091 Whoever pulls it out gets the bonus 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3092 They say if you can pull it free you become the new CEO 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3093 HR says women get to try, too. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3094 It's sword of a reminder 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3095 Arthur, we have a job for you! 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3096 He likes to get to the point. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3097 You may have to work knights. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3098 This may have something to do with the new succession plan. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3099 My boss doesn’t believe in pencil sharpeners 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3100 Calibrate that! 1.2027 0.04705 74 59 15 0
3101 EEO/AA compliant. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3102 The recruiter did not mention this... 1.2027 0.04705 74 59 15 0
3103 For gods sake, not again" "Who was it this time? Thor?" "No, Arthur." "I call it in. 1.2027 0.06660 74 65 3 6
3104 No, it comes out easily. The catch is, he just denies it. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3105 I hope you know how to fence, unlike the last person who had this office. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3106 I didn’t argue that the sword makes an impression, I simply mentioned I’d have prioritized it lower on the list of necessary office supplies. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3107 The last round of cutbacks was pretty severe. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3108 The next test is in stone. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3109 Costanza, are you sleeping? 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3110 He flies in once a month and acts like he's king or something. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3111 The last guy who pulled it out invented sliced bread. It's been stuck there ever since. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3112 Interesting paperweight. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3113 Very simply, Arthur, if you get the sword, you get the U.K. accounts. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3114 It's the only system the board could agree on after McKinsey determined the lady-or-the-tiger process was sexist. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3115 There's simply not a more congenial spot for happily ever aftering than here in middle management 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3116 And this is our newest office setup, from the Excalibur line. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3117 He actually did recuse himself. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
3118 This explains the new Round Table in the Boardroom. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
3119 This is your new office. Mr. Damocles is no longer with us. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3120 We wait for the rightful CEO. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3121 There can be only one. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
3122 Let’s see you do THAT with a pen. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
3123 He was spending too much. We had to cut him off. 1.2025 0.05215 79 65 12 2
3124 They say only the one worthy of the WiFi password will be able to pull it out. 1.2025 0.05215 79 65 12 2
3125 At this point, it's just a publicity stunt. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3126 If you can pull the sword out, the job is yours. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3127 Yeah, the new CEO is really into Game of Thrones. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3128 Another Spell Checker lost to automation. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3129 I'll promote you to Assistant Manager of Interns if you pull that sword out and hand it to me before anyone else gets here. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3130 It's the last part of the CEO selection process 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3131 Pull it out and you get a corner office. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3132 Call Arthur in accounting. Tell him there's an opportunity for career advancement here. 1.2000 0.06296 75 65 5 5
3133 The last guy got angry and left that here. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3134 As long as he filled out the correct 'out of office' request form, I don't have any concerns... 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3135 "Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise CEO." Or, we can just call a headhunter. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3136 Gone are the days of the pink slip. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3137 There can only be one. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3138 Careful with the height-adjustable lever. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3139 He thought he was going to be axed. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3140 The first one to pull it from the desk never has to meet with Human Resources ever! 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3141 Okay, Arthur, it's your turn. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3142 They call this sword Executor: 'Whoso pulleth out this sword of this fiberboard desk is rightwise relegated to a lifetime of unappreciated drudgery.' 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3143 There it is. Right where she left it. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3144 He no longer had the calibur for the job. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3145 This job has unique prerequisites.... 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3146 He wasn't kidding, he went through with it. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3147 "Do you feel worthy?: 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3148 Whoso pulleth out this sword, is rightwise the occupant of the corner office. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3149 The boss thinks that the sword is mightier than the pen. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3150 Our recruiter in the Salem branch says this method is outdated and we should simply see if candidates float. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3151 I think we really need a round desk. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3152 Tell Arthur he left his phone 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3153 Legend has it that we won't have a C.E.O. -- ever. 1.2000 0.06576 75 66 3 6
3154 Huh. Mr Damocles never goes home early. I hope he’s ok. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3155 Look, Arthur. You can become King Arthur Andersen. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3156 Give it a go, Wart. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3157 Things certainly have changed since that Merlin fellow took over in HR... 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3158 Another position slashed. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3159 Call Arthur in the mailroom to clean up this mess! 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3160 The board has directed us to find a white knight. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3161 A sign of the trade wars: "Made in China" printed on hilt. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3162 ...and he shall liberate us from Aloha Fridays. 1.2000 0.04650 75 60 15 0
3163 This method is Russian-proof! 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3164 There was a lot of mythology about our old bossz 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3165 And this one is Don Jr.’s Wall. You have got to see his dad’s. 1.2000 0.06296 75 65 5 5
3166 He's so cutting edge. 1.2000 0.06279 65 55 7 3
3167 Whosoever can de-synergize this cutting-edge technology will be crowned the next CEO. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3168 You get the job if you can pull the sword out. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3169 "Arthurs's been posted to Britain"... 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3170 It's a test for executive security 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3171 That was just his letter opener. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3172 Go get Art in Accounts again. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3173 So far, no one has even come as close to running GE as Sir Jack. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3174 I thought he'd get the axe, not the sword. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3175 Welcome to your job interview. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3176 Whosoever pulleth the sword from the desk shall be made CEO. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3177 Her name is “the destroyer of red tape”. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3178 His last words were: "You, true CEO, shall pull sword from my desk." 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3179 Guess he gave up on searching for the Holy Grail. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3180 That's the last time I ever order from FedEx-calibur. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3181 That is Arthur’s callsign he is celebrating the new account at Excalibur’s! 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3182 I'll also need a copy of your resume. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3183 They're looking for an X-calibre candidate. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3184 He's gone to look for Merlin. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3185 Knights of the Round Table cosplay starts at 3 pm. We're expecting you'll have the sword pulled by then. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3186 ...He's at it again. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3187 Maybe we should ask Arthur in accounting to give it a shot. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3188 Take a stab at it. 1.2000 0.04650 75 60 15 0
3189 Yeah, the whole election thing wasn't really working anymore. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3190 The ideal applicant has management experience and is able to remove Excalibur. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3191 The penis mightier. 1.2000 0.06296 75 65 5 5
3192 this job is a killer 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3193 We do not have staff stab each other in the back anymore since Arthur left. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3194 He's a lot sharper than the last guy. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3195 The other end is a toe-nail clipper. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3196 Look at it this way, you posture will improve. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3197 So this is how we choose the next CEO. 1.2000 0.06296 75 65 5 5
3198 It's indictment Excalibur. Whoever can't remove the sword has to take the fall. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3199 It's uncanny. He was just about to finish writing the last episode of "Game of Thrones," and this happened. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3200 Call King Arthur in Accounting. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3201 This explains his new Mustang. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3202 There may be some lingering resentment. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3203 His mistress was under the desk? Told you he was a backstabber. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3204 I know it’s a little old school, but HR says it’s still a hiring best practice. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3205 Oh fuck, they finally got him. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3206 Arthur couldn't do it either. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3207 The one who pulls it out will be CEO. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3208 Ex Officio 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3209 Don't even try. Just keep your head down. 1.1972 0.05537 71 59 10 2
3210 King of what exactly? 1.1972 0.05537 71 59 10 2
3211 Well, since he left no one's actually tried to pull Excalibur out. It's doubled-edged, you see. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3212 Waiting for someone pure of heart to claim the role. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3213 He's out getting a Holy Grail of coffee. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3214 All this just for a corner office? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3215 We were glad to see you describe yourself as “a born leader”. If you could just draw the sword from the desk, we will fill out your contract right away. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3216 A Hyperbolic larping quagmire, indeed 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3217 I take it there's a big rock under the desk. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3218 Wow, talk about an opportunity for promotion. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3219 Keep that kid from the mail room away from it! 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3220 Whoever shall pull forth the sword of justice gets first dibs at the stationary cupboard. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3221 First we figure out if that’s an Excalibur or a Damocles sword stuck in your desk. 1.1944 0.06452 72 63 4 5
3222 Mid-Millennium Modern 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3223 this is where the breadcrumbs lead us 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3224 It’s refurbished. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3225 I’m guessing you use that to open your mail? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3226 The leg-room's compromised, but it was a bargain. I sit farther to one side. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3227 It was hardly worth the effort. But the Feedback Booth was fun. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3228 He who pulls the sword from the desk escapes an enternity of middle management. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3229 Take a stab at it. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3230 Legend says if you pull it out you then have to slay the IT help guy. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3231 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this wood is rightwise Director of Human Resources born. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3232 He was our most dedicated Reenacting VP. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3233 ... it's a fast way to select a CEO, but you always end up with and English guy named Arthur. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3234 Arty is kind of a legend in the marketing department. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3235 No, really, it's not a problem. I'm fine with the minimalist artwork. I just wish the view out my window had more detail than an Etch A Sketch drawing. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3236 Ugh, will these confidence building exercises never end? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3237 "He's Updating 'The Sword in the Stone."' 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3238 Well, I guess we'll just have to call the head hunter and tell her we need to add another job requirement. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3239 It's a letter opener, but it never gets old when new employees yank it out. I give the shocked face while saying in hushed tones, "Wow! No one has ever been able to pull that out before." 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3240 I think Arthur's janitorial days are over. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3241 The boss went out to look for a smaller letter opener. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3242 She doesn't trust the adhesive on post-it-notes. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3243 The Search Committee is moving in a new direction. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3244 I didn't think I had a position of power. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3245 The Sherwood IKEA gave us a deal. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3246 Pull it out and do better than be king; you’ll get the golden parachute. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3247 That's either a promotion or you're fired. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3248 With any luck he’s hiding underneath his desk again ... 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3249 We call it, "Arthur".. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3250 Well that sword was mightier than the pen! 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3251 I guess that old saying is wrong. The sword IS mightier than the pen. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3252 The opportunities for upward mobility at the company seemed slightly exaggerated. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3253 Literalism is the new black. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3254 And this is your office Arthur. Of course if you prefer a round table, we can arrange that 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3255 It's the President's new pen. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3256 You know, you're not the first intern to ask. Your reward is the experience. My reward is this office. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3257 The Board has some questions about your succession plans. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3258 He’s still mad he’s the last one on the floor to receive a stand-up desk. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3259 They say only the ultimate hard-ass can pull it out. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3260 I'll need you to have this off my desk before 5 so I can fight my way home through traffic. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3261 I'll be honest, so far no one has shown they have what it takes for this job. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3262 It’s an ancient headhunting maneuver. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3263 Can I take a stab at it? 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3264 This is how we'll be interviewing for the new CEO position. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3265 We still haven't found a CEO. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3266 We will soon see if you are upper management material. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3267 YOU pull it out. Damned if I want to run this company. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3268 If you pull it out, you get the office and a partnership. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3269 It just went in. I didn't know he was under there. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3270 Quick call Hillary, this appears to be the chance she has been waiting for. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3271 Legend says, if you can pull it out you get the desk. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3272 His sarcasm was so thick you could cut it with a knife. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3273 You have to be more subtle these days if you're looking to hire a CEO with toxic masculinity. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3274 I asked for Excel to be installed on my desktop... but our new tech wizard, Merlin, tells me this is much better. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3275 Excalibur Industries has recently automated the Human Resources Department. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3276 Seems a little unfair to tie this to my severance package. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3277 I thought you said he was looking for somebody authoritarian? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3278 Pull it out and you get the round table 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3279 Maybe it’s time to put a minimum vesting period on our Golden Parachute option. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3280 "Pull it out and the office is yours". 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3281 I told him he wasn't executive-caliber. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3282 Looks like it was a hostile takeover. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3283 Only the most worthy can have this corner office; but beware, if you fail, eternal middle management awaits you... 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3284 The first person who pulls it out gets to be CEO. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3285 Oh, they'll always claim we have a glass ceiling. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3286 It’s really an all or nothing interview. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3287 This looks like a job for Artie in accounting.... 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3288 So this is what they meant by the 'old boys club' 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3289 He thinks he King Arthur. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3290 Whoso pulleth out this sword of chipboard and formica, is rightwise granted a second interview. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3291 Looks like the sword was mightier than the pen. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3292 And now one last test before we hire you 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3293 If you can remove it, you are the chosen one. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3294 I have a text out to Merlin. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3295 Our only problem has been the turnover. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3296 It's something Merlin in the Search Committee came-up with for selecting our next CEO. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3297 He was always a high-caliber worker. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3298 The plans for the new CEO are set in stone. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3299 He said he wouldn't be back until the company got him a desk that was round 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3300 If you would like another office, this one is not set in stone. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3301 Artie, let’s think outside the box. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3302 last guy who pulled it out put it back and left, no one has touched it since. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3303 Our HR person is on maternity leave. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3304 your turn. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3305 They say only the true CEO can remove it. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3306 That was his final statement! 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3307 Quite the office drama . . . 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3308 There was talk of cutting personnel... 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3309 It's our board-approved succession plan. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3310 The new succession process has been announced by HR 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3311 I thought it was supposed to be round. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3312 A little putty and it'll be like new. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3313 I know we asked you to recruit our new CEO, but are you sure this will work? 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3314 It’s easier than using that little desk key. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3315 Why can’t we just go back to using Monster.com? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3316 Weird, I know, but HR insists it's equal opportunity. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3317 He's taken his Crossfit obsession to a whole new level 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3318 Looks like Smithers won the office Deadpool. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3319 Your qualifications are outstanding. Now just one last test before we hire you. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3320 Dad said I can't be CEO until I can pull the damn thing out. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3321 Looks like it's not all quite set in stone after all. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3322 He who removeth the sword shalt be crowned CEO. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3323 I told my late wife we had a unicorn in our garden. She said I was crazy and tried to have me committed. But I convinced the shrinks I'd never said any such thing and it was she who got locked up. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3324 The company never hit its pre-IPO valuation, but investors did get some unusual swag. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3325 I heard they are promoting whoever pulls it out to CEO 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3326 Turnover rates are pretty high I'm afraid. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3327 We always thought his shouting, "heads are going to roll!" was just hooey, until... 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3328 Unearthly orientation process! 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3329 I've been told it's a pretty tough hiring interview. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3330 HR assured us it was reliable. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3331 These days, with all the competing distractions, you gotta strike while the iron's hot. This way I can teach an adult convert the torah and circumcise him in a single sitting. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3332 Too dramatic! HR should just go back to using pink slips. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3333 The Board was deadlocked on a new CEO, so they decided to go old school. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3334 Looks like Arthur already claimed his office, 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3335 Arthur will be right back, he's just gone to use the restroom. 1.1944 0.06452 72 63 4 5
3336 Seems a bit dramatic for a company-sponsored sabbatical. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3337 Have you met the new guy? Name's Arthur. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3338 They say whosoever retrieves the sword is anointed CEO. 1.1944 0.06452 72 63 4 5
3339 You'll be splitting your time between marketing and accounting. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3340 Ye who removes the sword rules the realm of middle management! 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3341 Don't we have an Arthur King in the mail room? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3342 It was either this, or have her kill the Kraken ... 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3343 We'll never know if they had the knives out for each other or just decided to bury the hatchet! thanks 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3344 That's what they call a double edge sword. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3345 It's a heck of a way to find the next CEO! 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3346 And this is Mr. Damocles' office. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3347 We used to hire a headhunter, but this is much cheaper and more effective. And it makes a great letter opener, too. 1.1944 0.06452 72 63 4 5
3348 The job is yours if you think you can pull us out of this. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3349 Did he give any notice at least? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3350 If you can remove it, we’ll crown you CEO. If not, you lose your benefits. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3351 That’s not a knife 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3352 And so whosoever shall remove the sword from the desk will be given the key to the executive washroom. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3353 It’s a good plan, but dressing up as a medieval peasant might be a bit much. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3354 As an autonomous collective our hands were tied. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3355 Shit happens. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3356 ...and the legend says, if you pull it out of the escritoire you’ll be the next true CEO 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3357 Now that’s a succession plan 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3358 Would the boss mind if I borrowed his letter opener? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3359 Legend has it that he who can pull the sword from the desk can pardon himself. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3360 No one will try to pull it out, as they all think a paternity test is easier. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3361 Replacing the pen with a sword made it a lot harder to fill this position. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3362 This is going to be long and drawn out. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3363 Excelibur® 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3364 Looks like Art didn't make the cut 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3365 I like to reminisce about his gentleness 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3366 Your corporate horse is in the garage. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3367 Impressive, but I still say the pen is mightier 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3368 So that’s what Mr. Arthur meant by “new interview process.” 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3369 He's the only manager who doesn't need a password to log in. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3370 It's said the one that pulls out the sword becomes the new CEO. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3371 It would appear that Brutus isn't back yet from his meeting with Cassius. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3372 "His last act of contrition really appalled us". 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3373 It would have been easier to have issued voting stock. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3374 King Arthur of officelot. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3375 If you can enter the password you become director of HR. So far no one has tried. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3376 I knew we should have bought a Round Table. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3377 He doesn't believe in round tables. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3378 Welcome to King Arthur Flour. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3379 Only an ideal man of destiny can ever hope to claim the throne of the Midwestern Regional Assistant Vice President of Domestic Marketing. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3380 Some say the pen is mightier. I disagree. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3381 We're looking for a new CEO. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3382 Budget cuts. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3383 Dibs on the sword! 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3384 This guy failed to execute the office of president. But he did successfully execute the office. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3385 Here's the deal; pull out the sword and you get to be President. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3386 I understand your predecessor tweeted a sexist comment about Wonder Woman. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3387 Our long-term incentive plan is limited...and very selective. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3388 After he did this, we gave him the axe. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3389 Arthur, are you under the desk trying to push the sword out from underneath? That's cheating. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3390 They said there'd be cuts. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3391 Guess it is better than hearing about him falling on it again... 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3392 Apparently we won that account. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3393 I know my CV claimed I had leadership skills but that was just to get my foot in the door. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3394 To be honest, I always had my doubts about the pen. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3395 The last three CEOs were absconders, so we are reverting to traditional hiring practices. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3396 Legend has it that he who can remove it from the desk gets to use the executive bathroom. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3397 I think he forgot his laptop. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3398 Saves a lot of time doing those tedious interviews. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3399 Looks like they've done the interviews and passed to selection. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3400 When I become King, things are going to be different around here. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3401 Just humor them. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3402 Our new succession plan. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3403 Facilities is sending Arthur up 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3404 I can't stop looking at the flag in the background. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3405 He always bragged how he answered to no one. Got that wrong. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3406 Pulling a sword from a stone is no basis for choosing a leader. But it doesn't give you a Donald Trump. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3407 It's my guess that whoever can pull it out becomes the once and future kingpin around here. 1.1944 0.06452 72 63 4 5
3408 It comes with the job, Art. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3409 In the end, Arthur was just a regular guy. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3410 Seems the executive search committee is going old-school 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3411 Kudos to Damocles for deciding to work virtually. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3412 The Board wanted a new CEO who was special. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3413 HR says to be patient. The search for the once and future CEO has only been underway for a month. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3414 'No, pulling the sword out doesn't entitle you to head the company or anything like that. It just means you can sit down without slicing the hell out of your legs.' 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3415 Dan must have switched to knight shift. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3416 In effect, it should streamline our screening process while maintaining the same stringency. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3417 It looks like the Chief Excalibur Officer has stepped out of the office for the moment. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3418 So that’s what he meant when he said he had his work cut out for him. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3419 He felt a little under the table. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3420 On the downside, it's not the most ergonomic. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3421 Succession planning has always been a bit different here. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3422 Well, Arthur, now you don't have to claw your way to the top. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3423 Is he telling me I'm fired? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3424 I suppose you thought this was to be an interview. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3425 I have a funny feeling some budget cuts may be coming... 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3426 What else would you expect at King Arthur Flour? 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3427 I'm still not convinced this Excalibur challenge is our best shot at finding a new CEO. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3428 As you can see, it was a hostile takeover. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3429 See! The sword is mightier than the pen 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3430 Yes, Arthur Kaplotnik does have rather regal pretensions. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3431 Well, at least we have a succession plan now. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3432 I guess it's not a game!? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3433 I'll pass. Who'd want to be king of this dump? 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3434 Whoeth pull the sword from the desk, geteh the view. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3435 I understand that it's their top of the line "King Arthur" model. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3436 Me thinks a tough act to follow. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3437 Yeah, Bill left after the hostile takeover. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3438 End of the day here it's just more responsibility, same pay. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3439 Geez. Wonder what the flag is for? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3440 He who removes it is the next David Remnick. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3441 Looks like he really did have a fail-safe succession plan in mind. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3442 Poor Stan... Damn You Novelty Letter Opener! 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3443 HR won't even let us try. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3444 Fuck this shit. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3445 He must be on the Throne. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3446 Looks like we need a system upgrade. Better call Arthur. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3447 Alas, here lies Lady Barr, hoisted by her own petard. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3448 Legend has it that whoever removes it must complete all TPS reports by Thursday. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3449 Just yesterday, it was dangling above his head. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3450 He rearranged things after he realized Kings don't have any power anymore. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3451 I think he got the memo. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3452 Plainly, we've yet to have a C.E.O. of executive caliber. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3453 Before you try, ask yourself, "What kind of white-collar job requires fencing skills?" 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3454 The Corporate Sword of infinite power and overwhelming responsibility. No one has been brave enough to try. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3455 He always was a drama queen. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3456 The last two who extracted it were gone in a month. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3457 Two kids. Lance and Gwen. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3458 'We're going to have to push the tables in the boardroom into a circle again, aren't we?' 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3459 No one has been able to remove it since Arthur left. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3460 As you can see, the keyboard is not mightier. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3461 We're still figuring out where to put the shield 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3462 Of course, if working your way up the corporate hierarchy seems daunting, there is an alternative. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3463 And then he said, "Screw you! I ain't falling on this sucker", stuck it in the desk and stormed out. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3464 Since the downsizing "Who So Pulleth" only gets an extra sick day and a $20 Amazon gift card 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3465 [This cartoon does not need a caption!!!!] 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3466 Your secretary filed sexual harassment charges. Be careful sitting down. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3467 Magic is not only accepted here, but encouraged. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3468 I said I wanted Swordfish for lunch. We have got to hire better interns. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3469 Like I said, you were the only Arthur who applied. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3470 The legend goes that, he who removes the sword from the desk, becomes CEO, and goes to prison for insider trading. No ones touched it. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3471 It seems no one wants the job. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3472 Man, Human Resources has really stepped up their in-office hiring policies 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3473 Our company really needs an anti-nepotism policy. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3474 Larry said if I can pull it out, they'd make me partner. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3475 I would tell you you've got your work cut out for you, but your predecessor didn't finish that before he left. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3476 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise executive-level born. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3477 Making partner generally requires 20 years of brown-nosing and back-stabbing. That, or pull out this sword 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3478 You could try to remove the sword, or go back to the mail room. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3479 Think the new CEO will be of our ex's caliber? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3480 How are we going to spin this? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3481 They turned down his request for a round desk. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3482 Whoever removes the sword from that desk is rightwise our CEO born. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3483 Giving up is not a choice, it's a thought. Maybe we shall think again. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3484 If you can draw the sword, the corner office is yours. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3485 'No-action' was the SEC's response to our hiring practises. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3486 If you can pull the sword out, you've got the job. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3487 As it turns out, supreme executive power derives from a farcical bureaucratic ceremony. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3488 I get to try first. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3489 This method will replace the electoral college. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3490 It's tempting, but my wife wants to be closer to our families in Sheboygan. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3491 Sorry about your new desk. Somebody at the office furniture store confused 'executive' with 'Excaliber' again. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3492 We built this desk around the stone. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3493 Time to find out whose Q4 earnings projections are ‘the chosen one’. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3494 It's yours for the taking. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3495 ...and the job is yours. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3496 A little medieval but you get the picture 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3497 I heard if you pull the sword out of the desk, you still won't get overtime. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3498 I thought the pen was supposed to be mightier than the sword. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3499 Let's try again tomorrow. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3500 It does look like Excalibur! Funny...you're the first one who ever pointed that out. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3501 Whosoever pulleth this sword of this desk can use the executive bathroom for a week 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3502 Man, corporate has stopped caring altogether. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3503 So maybe this Viking thing wasn't a delusion after all. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3504 He considers himself of extraordinarily executive caliber. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3505 Fortunately, she missed. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3506 It appears our razor ad campaign was a miss. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3507 I think it's safe to say the new boss doesn't mince words. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3508 She doesn’t like the new office. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3509 The sword is our boss now. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3510 Uh, what fresh hell is this? 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3511 He did say this job would be the death of him. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3512 We've streamlined vetting. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3513 The pay is good but the job is impossible. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3514 So much for pink slips. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3515 Believe me, this place is no Camelot. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3516 He only threatened the hammer was coming down. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3517 I knew he was no Arthur! 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3518 Michael Cohen intended to fall on the sword for Trump but he failed like so many things he has undertaken. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3519 Apparently, only the most corrupt amongst us can remove it 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3520 We'll need a round table in the boardroom. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3521 In the video the paper cutter worked really well. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3522 This is where I kill people. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3523 Damn, O'Klees... what does it mean? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3524 The legend says "He who pulls the sword from the desk shall possess a sword, and a desk with a gash in it." 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3525 If you can adjust the office chair up, you'll get the promotion. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3526 It sets the mood for terminations. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3527 Don't let it put you off. Mr. Arthur has a thing for unusual letter openers. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3528 Geez, this isn’t even a corner office. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3529 You could pull it out, but you'll still need 11 votes from the Board. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3530 He said it was his rendition of dropping the mike. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3531 I've heard their executive management program is old-school, but... 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3532 Are you familiar with Game of Thrones? 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3533 We were lucky to find a boss of that calibur. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3534 I thought he was fired for using 's' words. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3535 If you are true of heart, then you can have this view of Fifth Avenue. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3536 Disney take-overs can be a bit much. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3537 Legend has it, whosoever pulleth the sword from this desk is the right, wealthy CEO of this corporation 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3538 I've pulled it out lots of times, but I'm still not CEO 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3539 Sword of damnit’sclean 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3540 The lady of the lake quit. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3541 I'm sorry sir, he said it would help him drive his point home. I assumed figuratively... 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3542 So you think Compliance is your destiny? 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3543 Maybe this shouldn't be part of the interviewing process. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3544 It’s just this, the W4, and you’re hired. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3545 Guess that "pen is mightier" thing didn't fly with the editorial staff. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3546 The one in the middle I bagged at the NRA Convention at Disney. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3547 I have a call in to Merlin. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3548 It ensures fair hiring. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3549 If you pull out that sword, you'll have to run the company. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3550 For 2020, we're seeking candidates of Executive Calibur. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3551 One last test and the job’s yours. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3552 It’s actually the reason I stopped meeting with individual shareholders. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3553 Whosoever pulls the sword from the desk gets to keep the office. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3554 It was Arthur's last request. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3555 And now for your final assessment... 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3556 Arthur really feels the need to mark his territory every time he goes on holidays. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3557 Please wait here while we get the dragon 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3558 He said he'd take a stab at it. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3559 Whoever can successfully sue the sword maker will be our new chief legal officer. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3560 You have to see him joust with the Board. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3561 ...and this is where George Costanza met his fateful end. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3562 To start this project might be a bit more difficult than we thought. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3563 I know the board is demanding a succession plan, but there is just no way this is what they had in mind. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3564 maybe you will get lucky and it won't come out 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3565 You think IT has the password for that?! 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3566 The last guy who had the office ran out in a hurry. Something about a grail. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3567 Are you sure HR signed off on this? 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3568 Oh no it just pulls out, but it make the new CEO feel king like. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3569 Is it just me, or does it kinda look like there's a sword sticking out of that desk? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3570 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is our next CEO, but in the meantime, we've fallen into ruin. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3571 The person that's able to pull it out becomes the next CEO. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3572 Did you get that on Skymall? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3573 Only one who is pure of heart may draw this sword from this desk. So, yes, we're still looking for a new CEO. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3574 Warren Buffett has one simple requirement to become his successor. 1.1944 0.06452 72 63 4 5
3575 I presume this means that your services are no longer needed. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3576 It came with the invisibility cloak on ebay. If you can pull it out of my desk it's yours. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3577 "He chose not to fall on his sword, so he hid under the desk". 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3578 Can you imagine whose at the bottom of that sword? 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3579 This is the final stage of your job interview, Martin. We call it the "Leadership Potential Test." 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3580 Well, this and he has to have CEO hair. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3581 He couldn't leave without trying the old girl-in-the-desk trick one more time. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3582 Until then, we've been using it to open envelopes. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3583 What can I say? My ex came into the office while I was at the sales conference. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3584 Behold, Deskalibur! 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3585 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk and chair, is rightwise CEO. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3586 Merlin’s a somewhat unorthodox HR director. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3587 Sometimes it's a veto. Sometimes it's a pardon. That's a veto. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3588 Remove it and the job is yours. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3589 If this is their strategy for keeping me here forever...well played. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3590 He who can remove the sword becomes CEO 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3591 Those who live by the desk, die by the desk 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3592 We need to find someone who can interpret symbolism. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3593 Corner Suite- not bad having flunked out of knight school 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3594 Looks like Arthur may be getting the better view. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3595 Monday. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3596 The man who can pull Excalibur from the heart of stone in this swamp will become an Arthurian legend. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3597 It was a hostile takeover, why do you ask? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3598 Damocles called to apologize. Apparently the mark was slippery. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3599 The final challenge, Arthur. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3600 Sure, it saved us a lot of committee time but it’s still a heroic take on succession planning. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3601 We used to have the Board pick the CEO, but this way is more mythic. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3602 ...And this is the "unique competencies" part of the job interview. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3603 No sense in applying, I'd say Arthur has this one in the bag. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3604 These corporate raiders are old school. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3605 Only the new boss can pull it out, and he wants to rename the company Camelot. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3606 "Well played," I said to the bastard. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3607 Used to, a good resume was enough to land this job. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3608 Yes, this is still an an unpaid internship. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3609 This was Arthur’s office 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3610 It can only be removed by the one true Senior Vice President of Marketing. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3611 The corner office goes to whoever can remove the sword from the desk. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3612 No, any idiot can pull it out. Have a seat and you’ll understand the challenge. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3613 If you can pull it out, you get a shot at his daughter. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3614 I thought you said Johnson got he axe? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3615 It's the cutting edge of executive searching these days. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3616 I'm happy being just Assistant Manager 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3617 I’ll stick with getting my options granted. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3618 Cedar sword?I drove the desk to do it. It overheard me ordering a new desk yesterday. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3619 He can be a little combative. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3620 Go for it, Art 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3621 We had to let Arthur go after he slayed some of our German clients. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3622 He's out for an executive power lunch and might be back around 3:30. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3623 He never could extract the sword from the stone, so he ran for election. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3624 I see Harold left us a message before he walked out the door with only $8.5 mil. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3625 Mr. Erlin explains to Art from the mailroom..."Whoso pulleth out this sword from this escritoire, is right wise CEO". 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3626 Oh, I wanted this office too -- but apparently it's been retained for our once and future CEO 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3627 Whoever pulls it out has to rescue the company. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3628 He was aiming for the phone. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3629 I've gotta admit, nobody can say that the old man didn't have a succession plan. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3630 You gotta have pull to get to the top 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3631 Impressive resume, but we do need to verify your employment history before extending an offer. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3632 It's really more for intimidation. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3633 ...and this is where we put all the folks who wrote “Bestselling Arthur!” on their applications. Good luck. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3634 Yep, definitely particle board. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3635 So far, nobody has even tried. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3636 In this case the sword is indeed mightier than the desk. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3637 Is'nt it supposed to be a round desk? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3638 If the desk bleeds, you win. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3639 So if I can pull it out, I get the job? 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3640 I'm sure you'll do just fine here. Or not. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3641 Does it smell like something has died in this room to you? 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3642 This Arthur dude is supposed to help us get it out. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3643 He said he wanted to go back to just being a member of the staff, and then there was a "thud". 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3644 Put in a call to Merlin ASAP! 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3645 We’re using a new executive search firm. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3646 Oh, it pulls out easy enough. But nowadays kings earn way less than us derivatives traders so nobody bothers. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3647 Our succession planning is pretty intense here. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3648 I heard that Damocles went back to the mail room 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3649 Well, we've tried the usual interviews but this rapidly narrows down the search for a new CEO 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3650 Joe was always neat. Precise, too: the angle matches the decline in the Company's wealth. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3651 Ok. It appears he'll be back at 11. 1.1944 0.06141 72 62 6 4
3652 And that's Valhalla off in the distance, Siegmund! 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3653 All new hires have to give it a go since our last CEO died. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3654 He did mention cutting-edge technology. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3655 Artie, you can retire when you get that dang thing outta here! 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3656 He must have forgotten his cloak. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3657 For cripe's sake! We're middle managers, not magicians. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3658 Oh, is Artie on vacation this week? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3659 Closest we could get to a lake, I'm afraid 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3660 Just one more thing to take care of Arthur and then the job is yours. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3661 Whoso pulleth out this sword chooseth the theme for the potluck. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3662 Seeking truth is never easy. 1.1918 0.05740 73 62 8 3
3663 He who removes the sword from the desk becomes the CEO. It simplifies the selection process. 1.1918 0.05740 73 62 8 3
3664 Give it a try Arthur. If you can pull it out, the place is yours. 1.1918 0.05740 73 62 8 3
3665 They really went medieval with the letter openers this year. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
3666 HR is not sold on this yet as part of the interview process for the new CEO. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
3667 Hey Arthur - can you give me a hand with this? 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
3668 The story of the 'sword and the desk' dates back to the Trump business legend. 1.1918 0.06062 73 63 6 4
3669 And his final words were “the pin is NOT mightier than the sword!” 1.1918 0.05740 73 62 8 3
3670 Exec-alibur 1.1918 0.05740 73 62 8 3
3671 This imuseum piece is called : “Hodw The Donald came to power” 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
3672 Do you have King Arthur's contact information? 1.1912 0.05241 68 56 11 1
3673 He was about to pull it out and then just decided to go to Starbucks instead. 1.1912 0.04804 68 55 13 0
3674 If thou can so pulleth it out, the corner office is yours. 1.1892 0.05667 74 63 8 3
3675 ...and shall remain empty until the divinely appointed CEO pulls the sword from the desk and plants in the back of the present divinely appointed CEO. 1.1884 0.05939 69 59 7 3
3676 You get that out of here, I'll give you a raise. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3677 Apparently it's their way of choosing his successor. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3678 Honestly I don't know how he got it through security. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
3679 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise CEO! 1.1884 0.04742 69 56 13 0
3680 I trust you're not aichmophobic, Bill. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
3681 Your predecessor had a lot of pull. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
3682 They've really thrown down the gauntlet this time 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3683 This is it, Carl. Your big chance to be the Once and Future CEO. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
3684 Mr. Damocles, this is Steve from accounting. He'll be working under you until we figure out what happened to Bernard. 1.1884 0.05939 69 59 7 3
3685 Interest in being King of the Britons has really dropped off since Brexit. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
3686 I think it is a warning to that moron Jelani Cobb. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3687 I don’t think I want to be King of accounting. 1.1884 0.05939 69 59 7 3
3688 This is the last phase of our aptitude test, Artie. 1.1884 0.05939 69 59 7 3
3689 This is the last test for your promotion 1.1884 0.04742 69 56 13 0
3690 I don't know about you, but I've never been that mad at a desk before! 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3691 I suggest you soften the tone of her yearly review. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3692 Yes Fred, the boss does want you to choose your weapon 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
3693 You can have this office on one condition 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3694 I just don't think the boss is taking this succession planning thing seriously... 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3695 Legend has it that if you pull out the sword, you don't need to reply to emails on weekends. 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
3696 Give a pull to see if you'll be our new CEO. 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
3697 His knights of the rectangle desk schtick is making me sick. 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
3698 Arthur didn't even try. We ARE in trouble. 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
3699 Behold, Excaliboard-chair. 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
3700 I don't care who put it there, don't pull it out 'til Q4! 1.1842 0.05528 76 65 8 3
3701 Artie, your the mailroom clerk. Do you really think you have a chance? 1.1833 0.06056 60 51 7 2
3702 If you can pull it out, you become The King of Wall Street. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
3703 Artie in Accounting always has first dibs on this hot desk 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
3704 Dammit!..I told Uber-Eats, Swordfish!.... 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3705 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk shall be rightful CEO of this whole company. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3706 Whoever claims Excel-ibur will henceforth reign as king of all accountants. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3707 They say he led by the sword. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3708 Now you must prove you're ready to lead Medieval Times Dinner Theater. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3709 ... and he who draws it forth shall become Ex Officio... 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3710 I didn’t know it was Jewish, either! 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3711 They said whoever pulls it out gets the office. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3712 Pull out the sword and the job is yours. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3713 ...and then he said that he wants me to be his Lancelot. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3714 Look and see if there is any salami in the top drawer on the right. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3715 ... and that's the legend of the once and future CEO 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3716 If I pull it out, will I become President of the company? 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
3717 I could pull it out and get the office, but the view does not inspire me. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3718 Legend has it that the sword can only be removed by a special being who beats Q3 target projections while also slashing overhead allowing for significant stock buybacks resulting in increased value for shareholders. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
3719 Know any executive material named Arthur? 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3720 If you can pull it out, Artie, the Corporation is yours... but watch out for your brother. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3721 You're a lucky man, Mr. Damocles. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
3722 Your predecessor descended from samurai with Impostor Syndrome. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3723 You could say that it's character # 140 in his final tweet! 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3724 Arthur is out to lunch. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
3725 In the end, Executive Recruitment is pretty simple. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3726 I wonder who threw down the gauntlet? 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3727 That's one serious letter opener. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3728 Arthur, I think you might be the one for this job. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3729 Art from Human Resources says he'll be down to pull it out. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3730 The last accountant named it Excelibur. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3731 After since old Mr. Arthur died, nobody can yank the damned thing out. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
3732 He pulled it out of the last CEO’s back. 1.1831 0.06121 71 62 5 4
3733 I GUESS KING ARTHUR COULDN'T DO IT. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
3734 This is going to be one hell of a tough job interview. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3735 "I don't think he's coming back"! 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3736 So the Excalibur Company began its quest for a new CEO. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3737 I thought he told Stormy he’s great at pulling out. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3738 Here's the deal: If you can pull out the sword you can be CEO, but you'll also be under indictment. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3739 I knew we shouldn't rebrand as Excalibur Strategies. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3740 Poor old Larry Damocles just never knew when it was time to quit. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
3741 No one since Brady has ever forgotten, that the boss likes a DOUBLE shot of expresso in his morning coffee. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3742 They only use it when their cutting staff. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3743 Right before he left he said whoever can pull out the sword gets to be the new CEO. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3744 His last words were, 'Give them a sword and people will find their own way.' 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
3745 Our new CEO believes the sword IS mightier than the pen . 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3746 I think this means the budget was finalized for 2019. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3747 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise CEO. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
3748 Yup, that's what you have to do to get an office with a window. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
3749 HR really is getting picky. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3750 It's been pretty effective since we went paperless and got rid of all our pens. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3751 You could say our interview process is a little Medieval. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3752 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise CEO born of all synergy. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3753 So the pen is not mightier than then sword 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3754 We've had a lot of trouble filling this position. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3755 So I say, ‘The activist shareholders are 'literally' pirates? I think you mean figuratively…’. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3756 You pull it. No, you pull it. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3757 Oh no! He's been sword in. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3758 Look what happens behind my back! I could be in Macbeth. I could be a King! 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3759 I gave it a tug yesterday and immediately got an email from HR asking for my shoe size. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3760 Who broke in this time? 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3761 I hear it's rigged so only a Harvard MBA can pull it out. 1.1818 0.06072 66 57 6 3
3762 For some reason, this position has really high turnover. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3763 The engraving on the handle says, "Make America Wait, Again", but I still say send the office kid up. 1.1818 0.06072 66 57 6 3
3764 It's cheaper than a search firm. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3765 It's been there for months... no one wants to try 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3766 At least you can see the park. 1.1818 0.06072 66 57 6 3
3767 She must have lost her letter opener again. 1.1818 0.04784 66 54 12 0
3768 We’ve decided to simplify the hiring process. 1.1818 0.04784 66 54 12 0
3769 It's as good a way to choose our next CEO as the way we did before. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3770 He who pulls out the sword will make Mexico pay for the desk. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3771 I see the sword but where the heck is Damocles? 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3772 I knew I shouldn’t have skipped Arthurian Ascension 101. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3773 I have an exceptional resume and high quality references, isn't that enough to qualify for the job? 1.1818 0.06072 66 57 6 3
3774 When Wilson said “chivalry isn’t dead,” I naturally assumed he meant just holding doors open for people. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3775 I knew you shouldn't have let him read "Death of a Salesman" 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3776 It's imported. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3777 Barbarians at the gate. 1.1818 0.06072 66 57 6 3
3778 I guess Damocles changed his mind. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3779 Never mind 'King of the Britons' - we're talking stock options! 1.1818 0.04784 66 54 12 0
3780 Call the exterminator, there just has to be a better way. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3781 Arthur has gone off the rails again. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3782 I heard he was getting axed. Now I'm just confused. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3783 And if a temp has been chosen, a temp shall open letters. 1.1818 0.04784 66 54 12 0
3784 Also you'll have to be confirmed by the Senate 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3785 If you can pull the sword out, you can assume the director's chair. 1.1818 0.06072 66 57 6 3
3786 It's leftover from an earlier HR era. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3787 "whoever pulls it out is the new CEO", the note said. 1.1818 0.06072 66 57 6 3
3788 Don't get me wrong, you nailed the interviews -- but Human Resources here is old-school." 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3789 I asked you to cut the cord and move to the cloud. I don't think you quite understood what I meant. 1.1818 0.06072 66 57 6 3
3790 We gave him a name plate. But he wanted something more expressive than ARTHUR, KING 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3791 Yeah, they fired him. King wasn't even his real name. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3792 The CEO Search Committee has a new streamlined hiring process. 1.1818 0.06072 66 57 6 3
3793 So this is how you get to be CEO. 1.1818 0.04784 66 54 12 0
3794 The Executive Committee wants to make sure there are no doubts about our next CEO. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3795 Jeez, another deskicide. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3796 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise head of Marketing & Communications 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3797 The CEO likes people to think he's into Arthurian legend. It sets them up for the big reveal that he's actually into decapitation. 1.1818 0.05675 66 56 8 2
3798 And this is just one of the ways our the morning starts off here. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
3799 They warned me he was a difficult man to call on. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3800 Hmm, thought his desk would be round... 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3801 Maybe he is under the desk? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3802 Came in handy in a cutthroat deal 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3803 I didn't realize it was that kind of knight job. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3804 If you need to know what that's about, you can forget about becoming CEO of this corporation. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3805 He’s a little overzealous with the exclamation points, too. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3806 Yeah, not having a CEO can be hard. But just think--when we do, it'll be magical. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3807 Where is the pen when you need one. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
3808 After this is the panel interview. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3809 we're still using sit down desks, we all still wear suits, why would anyone want to be signified as being the rightful leader of this dinosaur? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3810 He said whoever can get this out is the new CEO. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3811 "sigh" the saying is the PEN is mightier than the SWORD... 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3812 So now he is bringing his re-enactment hobby into the office. I just wanted to bring my dog in on a Tuesday. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3813 Whoever pulls the sword from the desk shall be promoted from within. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3814 You can do the exit interview. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3815 If you start in the mail room and you want to get ahead, be sure you have a good letter opener. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3816 You've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel lucky?" 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3817 We call this the Excalibureau. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3818 You'll find we cling desperately to our phallic legends here. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3819 It was occupied by an apprentice. I'll always remember his happy face. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3820 Nobody, but NOBODY, harasses her. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3821 My wife did this once 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3822 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this stone and workstation... 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3823 Look at it this way. He's more quiet than "Chainsaw Al." 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3824 I guess the sword was mightier than the pen after all 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3825 His negotiating techniques are medieval. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3826 I told him not to hide under his desk! 1.1791 0.06700 67 60 2 5
3827 Leave it there! I can't take it in my damn carry-on anyhow. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3828 Life goes easier on Damocles these days 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3829 It's the ultimate in computer logins. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3830 See i told you, 'Hired by the sword, Fired by the sword'. Nice knowing you Frank, I'll help you clear your desk. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3831 I think my predecessor might be saying, "this job isn't all it's stacked up to be." 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3832 That means we are going to have a pot luck dinner at our next board meeting. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3833 Whoever pulls it out gets to be CEO. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3834 The rules have changed. If you get the computer up and running, you’re the new CEO. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3835 If you can pull it out I guess you got the job. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3836 Who engraved "Caliburn" on the letter opener? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3837 It's part of our regional manager test. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3838 Damocles, . . . no. Just Trump's fly swatter. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3839 It's the only way to restore faith in our elections. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3840 I don’t think they covered that in the new employee orientation. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3841 This is the new chief's answer to our request for a raise. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3842 Pull it out and your computer will be virus free forever. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3843 Whosoever draws the sword from the desk is rightful CEO of the Wilkinson Corporation. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3844 This is not what I pictured when the boss said he had a new challenge for us. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3845 So far no candidate has passed the test. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3846 Lance, get Merlin from accounting and that maintenance kid, Arthur. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3847 Trump fell on it and now we can’t get it out 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3848 Go get Arthur, that new temp in the mailroom. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3849 It's mentioned briefly in the non-performance clause of your employment contract. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3850 The boss said that there'd be cuts. I never thought it would come to this. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3851 I really didn't think they'd check the lies I put on my resume 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3852 He’s leaving us to become a magician’s assistant 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3853 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise Manager born of all accounting. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3854 They say it's hard to find qualified candidates these days 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3855 The perp’s victimology is evolving 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3856 Our leader has been performing too many magic acts in addition to telling too many lies! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3857 That's where Kronos used to sit. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
3858 This is the part of the interview that the other candidates have failed- So, good luck. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3859 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise appointed Regional Vice President of Operations. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3860 Legend says that only the son of the owner will be able to pull the sword from the desk. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3861 Long story short, we learned a "handy" lesson in 2016. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3862 The board decided whoever can remove it will be our new CEO 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
3863 And for our last stop on the interview, let's just make sure you can actually remove the sword. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3864 The new HR guy is a swashbuckler. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3865 Yes, we've ordered a round table for the executive dining room. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3866 Arthur said we he wanted the Excalibur model 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
3867 And that is the Letter Opener of Damocles. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3868 I guess he took a leave of absence to practice his sword play. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3869 Pull out the sword, get the job. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3870 And the last step in this interview is to see if you can pull out the sword. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3871 That's when she shouted: "The penis NOT mightier than the sword." 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3872 That explains the shape of the new conference table. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3873 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this stone shall deal with all of our harassment scandals. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3874 I mean, sure, I'm strong enough...but do I really want the responsibility? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3875 This will be your final King Arthur Flour Company interview challenge. Good luck. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3876 I see the new letter opener is here. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3877 Looks like the laptop has prevailed over the desktop. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3878 Why, thank you, Arthur. I quite like it myself. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3879 They're not making CEOs the way they used too. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3880 I can give you a hint: the Grail is under the desk. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3881 It's the last step in the corporation's interview process for a new CEO. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3882 The boss said whoever can pull the sword out of the desk will be crowned Assistant Vice President. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3883 Looks like the time machine is working again. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3884 Whoever pulls it out, legend tells, will have a long sit-down with HR. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3885 You could say I've carved out a niche for myself here. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3886 I thought he would just drop the mike! 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3887 When I wanted to be CEO, the desk was made of stone, 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3888 There can be only one true king, but he usually works from home. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3889 His ex-wife claims his body is in there. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3890 Hey Arty, you give it a pull. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3891 I know he occasionally napped under his desk. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3892 You see Bill, the pen used to be mightier than the sword, but then I started watching Game of Thrones" 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3893 Dare you! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3894 Executive search must've run into a dead end. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3895 Well, thanks anyway for trying, Art. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3896 It was Arthur's. He got mad a quit yesterday and we can't get it out. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3897 It turns out the sword is mightier. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3898 I guess this explains the round table in the conference room. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3899 Let's find a new executive search firm. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3900 All I jokingly said to him was, "I just saw your naked wife and Peter from Payroll down in the parking garage making out in the back seat of your new Plymouth Voyager." 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
3901 ….and this is the EXecutive promotions suite 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3902 Also, no hiding under the desk. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3903 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise to the executive washroom born. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3904 I guess we need to put a “No Smiting” sign in here. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3905 He who pullets out the sword getteth the corner office 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3906 He who pulleth out the sword will be the rightful heir to this corner office. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3907 Legend says it can only be removed by an associate vice president. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3908 Time to select an new CEO. Tell Arthur. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3909 If only he hadn't hidden under the desk. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3910 Gwenn said he stepped out for some WD-40....now it all makes sense. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3911 In his case the sword is mightier than the pen. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3912 Remove it, and a corner office will be yours! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3913 Hire a lady they said. There was NO warning about a lady of the lake. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3914 It's part of the new appointment system. Anyone who pulls it out gets to be Secretary of State. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3915 OK, Art, you want that promotion? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3916 She's been trying to cut her workload to equal her 82 cents earned for every dollar earned by her male inferiors. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3917 We still have an opening for a financial wizard. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3918 Is Arthur in today? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3919 Unfortunately, Arthur was fired last week. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3920 Our last CEO negotiated the terms of his replacement’s job offer . . . that was 13 years ago. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3921 I'd pull it out, but considering the Hollywood culture I'm not so sure I want to be CEO of a movie studio. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3922 Lucky you to draw Damocles's old office. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3923 My hunting is kind of hit or myth. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3924 Well Arthur, the board feels that if you are truly meant to be CEO, you should have no trouble whatsoever removing it. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3925 Technically yes, but there's still the SEC and Elizabeth Warren 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3926 You know if you pull it out he’ll pop up and say ‘dilly dilly’. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3927 Conan in Accounting keeps hinting that he wants my office. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3928 Mmm, did my secretary quit? 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3929 Seems to me my education should count for SOMEthing. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3930 Yes, your first day will be a little demanding 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3931 I think it's a trap... 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3932 Not sure it's what I'm cut out for. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3933 Apparently the guy leading the search for our next CEO is a big fan of English legends. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3934 Well, he was on steroids for years. Maybe it's his letter opener 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3935 Looks like they have reopened the search for new CEO 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3936 after receiving it as paperweight, he has gone after the only papers he deems worthy of it: the commandments tablets 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3937 It's now called the hernia maker 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3938 Poor ol’ Art. They didn’t even let him clean out his desk. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3939 We got tired of interviewing for the position. I’ll wait outside. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3940 You see a lot of that in Sales. We're more Merlins in Accounting. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3941 This test is for lower management , to be CEO you have to climb a big beanstalk, steal a bag of gold, a magic goose, a singing harp and then kill a Giant. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
3942 I think Arthur’s taking these cutbacks a bit literally. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3943 He's doing everything he can to be perceived as a legend. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3944 Remove it, and access to the Executive Bathroom is yours. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3945 Looks like Arthur is out of the office again. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3946 It's in the handbook - We live and die by it. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3947 Too bad we lost Siegfried in the recent merger. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3948 You know how the story goes and the way this company is going - no one has been in this room for years. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3949 I think Bill got confused when he was told to spearhead the initiative. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3950 I guess Bob didn't get that raise. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3951 He said if you can pull it out you can keep it. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3952 Whomever pulleth the sword from this desk of teak is the rightful ruler of the Floor 6, and wielder of a thousand memos. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3953 O....k let's run it again, but with Steve. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3954 This is the final step in the company's new succession planning process. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3955 Arthur saw the sword but fear turned him into stone. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3956 It's our new executive search tool: If you pull it out, you're the boss! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3957 So we’re still waiting on Mr Arthur for his 12:45 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3958 I thought you said you worked for Canon. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3959 Merlin's beard! Arthur really took that movie to heart! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3960 It looks like more Knights of The Rectangular Table. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3961 I told you Arthur would get the promotion. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3962 This is what he does before declaring his lunch break. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3963 You should see his LinkedIn profile. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3964 He said he wanted a round desk? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3965 Saves time on job interviews. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3966 We built a desk over the stone, but still can't get anyone to take the office. The last two occupants suffered delusions claiming they saw an old guy in a funny robe with a long, white beard waiting in the corridor and tapping his watch. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3967 Close, but no cigar! 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3968 It actually just rings a bell to summon his secretary. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3969 Some day, the once and future CEO will come and pull it out, and our share price will skyrocket.. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
3970 Huh, are you thinking what I'm thinking? Freeeeeeedooooooom! 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3971 Jim, I guess you won’t be getting that promotiion. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3972 Not exactly the sword in the stone, but it's a nice try. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3973 There are worse ways to pick a CEO 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3974 In this company, you earn your perks via less orthodox ways. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3975 You're right, the placement of that laptop is very curious! 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3976 Arthur is into horsemanship and hacktivism in his spare time. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3977 It IS the key to the executive washroom. They decided to skip a step in the process. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3978 Trump will be back after they stitch up his hands. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3979 Call the Round Table ~ see if they can spare Arthur for just a minute. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3980 Watch some corporate hotshot pull it out like it’s nothing. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3981 As you can see, we aren't looking for a "Y" caliber or "Z" caliber type of employee. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3982 It is written: whoever withdraws the sword will gain a massive low-bid janitorial contract. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3983 HR’s going back to tradition to fill this spot. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3984 If he loses the election, I expect the transition to be difficult. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3985 I now feel unprepared for this year's performance review. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
3986 The succession committee is at wits' end. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3987 Man, living out our sexual and feudal fantasies really cost us. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3988 After the latest deadhead CEO, the board decides on a radical new recruitment method. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3989 Mr. Arthur has a bit of a temper. He did THIS just before storming out of the office shouting "I told them it should be round. ROUND! 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3990 Someone pulled an all-knighter. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3991 The recruitment company say it has always worked in the past. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3992 How soon can you start? 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3993 Whoever becomes CEO of Camelot Enterprises will get this office. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
3994 According to the legend, whoever pulls it out gets to be CEO. That's what Jeff says, any way. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3995 Here's your new office, as I mentioned the job is pretty straight forward and rewarding... any questions? 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3996 At least the sword's in the desk and not in CEO Stone. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3997 It's rare for people of that caliber to just disappear. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3998 The boss can be a bit of a prick if you get on the wrong side of him. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3999 He who pulleth the sword from the desk shall receive the corner office. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4000 If you remove the sword from my desk I'll put in a good word with the boss" "Only if I get to call you the Lady of the Lake too 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4001 They decided to return all robocalls via Skype. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4002 He was never one to fall on the sword. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4003 The boss always had difficulty with sayings. Many times he said die by the sword live by the sword. How sad. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4004 That weird consultant with the pointy hat stuck that there and said we should appoint whoever could pull it out to be the CEO. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4005 He always hated that desk. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4006 I guess her meeting with HR is done! 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4007 Here at Great America Inc. we know for sure that in fact the Sword is mightier than the Pen. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4008 It's an old Anglo-Saxon message. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4009 The board ordered the search committee to come up with a flawless process for finding a once and future CEO. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4010 Succession planning has never been our strong suit. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4011 There are easier ways to get rid of woodworm Arthur. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4012 No, it's actually a metaphysical statement about the angst of living in the current world 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4013 We loved your resume Arthur; I just need to ask you to do one small task, to see if you are destined to be the boss. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4014 Ok, so final stage of this interview is to slay our CEO 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4015 Pull out the sword and it's all yours. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4016 The CEO doesn't have a daughter, but you'd get to keep the sword. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4017 Arthur, to get this job, remove the spyware. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4018 And if you’re promoted, you get a round desk 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4019 Our chairman hates executives who just hide under their desks. Leaving it there was the search committee's idea. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4020 Whosoever unleashes the Mighty Excalibur shall lead this company to four quarters of sustained growth. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4021 Now that I think about it, all he said was '12:30 sharp.' 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4022 Pull it out and you’ll be CEO 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4023 We need you to write an extraction app. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4024 Barely scratched his knee. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4025 Remember when he said he wasn't feeling well during Friday's round table staff meeting? 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4026 When you remove the sword, be ready to staunch the flow of soul-crushing boredom. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4027 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise senior executive born. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4028 Round tables weren't in the budget. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4029 British knife crime is worse than we thought 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4030 It doubles as a letter opener 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4031 Think this is weird, you should see the new boardroom table. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4032 Finding the virgin was the hard part. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4033 McKinsey implemented a new matrix structure that derives from Arthurian lore. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4034 Did you see what he did with his stapler last week? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4035 He was certain he'd be safe under the desk. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4036 Anyone under consideration to run this company will have to put forth the required effort. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4037 Light colored carpet! Seems Fascinato is a confident magician. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4038 It's not worth it after Brexit. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4039 And this is how we found out that the sword is indeed mightier than the pen… and Greg. Thanks for being able to replace him so quickly. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4040 You have to admit it's a novel approach to right-sizing. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4041 Merlin says that whoever can pull this out becomes a knight of the oval table. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4042 New CEO hiring directive from Ms. Lake at corporate. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4043 Your login credentials have been upgraded. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4044 Just pull it out and the job is yours. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4045 you’re the 4th one to try for it this week 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4046 He didn't get fired for using the sword, he got fired because he didn't use the pen. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4047 It's not going to be easy replacing Mr. Damocles. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4048 If you can pull it out, the promotion is yours. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4049 Hey Artie, if you really think you deserve the corner office... 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4050 Does he know we have letter openers in the supply room? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4051 Did it nick her head or yours? 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4052 I see cuts coming. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4053 But do you think the NRA will support the new line? 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4054 I don't understand , why would anybody want to kill a desk? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4055 Don't worry, it's childproof. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4056 Pending full board and shareholder approval of course. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4057 The intern who can withdraw this sword will be generously rewarded with a template referral letter for his or her next unpaid internship. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4058 yeah...me neither. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4059 No one wants to removes it from the desk, they might inherit the company. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4060 So far, no one has wanted this office.The reward for removing that thing is an all expense paid trip to the White House to meet the president. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4061 It's almost impossible these days to get a corner office. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4062 One of these days Schlossberg is going to go too far. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4063 The CEO's name is Merlin. He thinks it's funny. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4064 It's a trap. Last guy removed it is emptying chamber pots in England 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4065 Looks like the Search Committee's at a real impasse! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4066 Oh, that's right. We've started a Medieval hazing. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4067 This is really going to affect our turnover rate. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4068 Many have tried to pull the Sword from the Desk, all have failed. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4069 I missed 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4070 He said he was taking the day off. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4071 They say whom ever pulls it out shall become the CEO but I think its a trap 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4072 Arthur, if you can remove it, you are our President. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4073 Whoever pulls the sword out of the desk is the CEO. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4074 ... and according to your CV, you shouldn't have a problem pulling the sword. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4075 And this is where they filmed the last episode of the “Apprentice” 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4076 Our company believes work is the holy grail. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4077 Artie quit. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4078 We’ve got pretty rigorous hiring standards these days. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4079 They take letter opening seriously in the c-suite. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4080 It looks like Arthur got the job. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4081 I'm guessing the anger management class isn't working. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4082 And you thought the round conference table was odd. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4083 Judging by the size of that letter opener, do you think he might be overcompensating...? 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4084 The Board also decided to go with a round table for its annual meeting. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4085 Sorry Bill, but I think it's safe to say he spiked the project. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4086 It looks like Arthur is ready to let someone else have a crack at his job..! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4087 I assume this is in lieu of the exit interview 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4088 If there was a harbor view, I’d consider it. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4089 ...and this is our Succession Planning office. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4090 Isn't the pen mightier? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4091 If you pulled it out, you'd just put it back in once you saw the latest quarterly report. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4092 No one really wants the responsibility that comes after pulling it out. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4093 And this is the Once and Future Assistant Manager's office. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4094 It's your turn to see if you're King Arthur Andersen. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4095 Only the most immoral of our associates will be able to remove it from the desk. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4096 I don't know which one I'd prefer - 22 caliber or Excalibur? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4097 I warned you this would happen. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4098 I bet she never saw it coming for her. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4099 I told her to keep a pen on the desk. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4100 Everyone knew I was in line for his job...up until he saw that damned, revival of 'Camelot'! 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4101 Go ahead Artie, I dare you. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4102 You have a choice of this or the epee. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4103 Whomsoever removeth this sword is by rights the CEO of this company. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4104 Ya, he was way more intense before the White House... 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4105 He couldn't pull it out so he decided to build around it. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4106 After its top drawer wouldn't open, it did the honorable thing 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4107 Not that our former CEO had a high expectations for his successor... 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4108 Scamalot!! 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4109 Why did we name the company Excalibur? I'll tell you why we named the company Excalibur. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4110 Mr. Pence? Sir? He said "ON YOUR SWORD"....Sir? Sir? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4111 We take hiring very seriously here at Camelot. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4112 He used to be a magician. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4113 It's called Camelot Industries. What did you expect? 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4114 We at Everything Archaic take our hiring process very serious. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4115 Remember: It's just a job. Don't try to be a hero. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4116 They say whoever can remove the letter opener may have already won a free vacation. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4117 I told you it was the Holy Grail of corner offices. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4118 I guess Damocles is out to lunch. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4119 I knew the boss was "old school" when it came to succession planning, but this is unexpected. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4120 If you are able to draw the sword from the desk, you shall be the true heir to the reserved parking spot. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4121 If you can pull it out you become CEO 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4122 Looks like someone lost D&D 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4123 You should see the other guy. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4124 Only a hero can save this company now. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4125 Our CEO loves King Arthur. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4126 This should simplify the ceo interview process. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4127 Yeah, I would have thought so too...but a stone desk was not in Arthur's budget. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4128 They say he just keeps it for emergencies 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4129 The boss still thinks it is the Excalibur because he can't pull it out of his desk. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4130 Seems like a lot of effort just to run the accounting department. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4131 A bit twelfth century, if you ask me, but he uses it to adjust the angle of his laptop. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4132 They're looking for a new Marketing VP. The last guy ran off with the lady in the lake. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4133 So what’s his point? 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4134 Only Trump can remove it. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4135 Is that a warning? 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4136 Either the sword of Damocles has finally fallen or that's the biggest letter opener I've ever seen. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4137 Behold - EXCELIBUR! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4138 Your final interview question. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4139 Now he’s featuring the Excalibur sword and calling it King Donald’s Court! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4140 Whoever pulls out the Sword of the Desk is the rightful Apprentice and shall inherit a corner office with a glass ceiling and a golden urinal. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4141 Pull it out, you get the job. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4142 Careful, it's actually pretty loose. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4143 Our CEO is a King Arthur geek. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4144 Icahn was here. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4145 "Holy moly, it's Excalibur. Fred's gone to seek the Holy Grail". 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4146 He must have gotten a bad annual review. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4147 Our consultants said that it worked well when they used it to find Medieval Manor a new CEO. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4148 Whoever pulls the sword from the desk will be Arthur king of accounting. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4149 But I told him that he had to fall on his sword 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4150 I guess we have our answer on that new advertising campaign for the vikings. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4151 He says it gives him presence. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4152 So... Johnson is out. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4153 They say whoever pulls the sword from the desk will run the company forever, or at least until the next stockholders' meeting. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4154 When they told us to expect staff slashes like nothing we'd ever seen before, they really meant it. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4155 This company is our Camelot, he likes to say. And guess what that makes him. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4156 Only the true CEO will be able to pull it out. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4157 They say the person who can remove the sword gets to be a condescending jerk to everyone else. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4158 He who manages to pull the Sword out, gets the corner office 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4159 Arthur, I like your chances! 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4160 He said, "whoever can guess my password will be CEO." That's just there as a distraction. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4161 Behold Excaliburdensome! 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4162 There can be only one. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4163 R. Janvier del Valle writes some amazing special effects! 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4164 And our final exhibition is a performance piece called: "The Sword of Damocles." 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4165 @Whitehouse tweeted that only @POTUS can remove it. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4166 The obvious choice would be "Excalibur," but we try to avoid cliche. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4167 If only C Level hiring was as easy. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4168 A bunch of us tried -- wouldn't budge. Anyway, this is your office, Artie. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4169 No, it's just about investor confidence. A trained chimp can pull it out. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4170 Don't get too excited, Art. It's just a novelty letter opener. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4171 He must be out getting the mail. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4172 We're saving oodles on the executive search firm. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4173 Where did Mr. Davidson go?” “He wanted to answer that age old question about a sword and a pen. I guess he’s celebrating his win.” “I’m calling security 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4174 So the rumor is true! The Boss does have a King Arthur complex. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4175 I'm really starting to get that glass ceiling thing Janice was talking about. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4176 The party decided that it was the only way to find the best candidate to defeat Trump! 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4177 I guess the board has started its search for the next CEO. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4178 Somehow I always thought the table should be round. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4179 Our CEO is an ardent Arthur fan. If you can remove the Excalibur in one pull the job is yours. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4180 The HR staff here is cutting edge. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4181 Oh, damn. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4182 I think this idea was taken right out of the final Enron Corporate Board Meeting. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4183 It's still in there but the severance payout was a King's ransom. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4184 Whoever can pull it out is our new CEO. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4185 No, we're not dressing up this time-but please indulge HR and give it a try. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4186 Whosoever wields Excel-ibur is the one true king of Accounting. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4187 We've found this is by far the most rational way to select a CEO. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4188 Whoever pulls it out is CEO. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4189 And, verily, whosoever draws Excel-ibur becomes Head of Accounts. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4190 You may find our interview process a little unusual. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4191 God's word is stronger than a double edged sword. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4192 I told you he was in a foul mood. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4193 It must be Staff Appreciation Day again. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4194 No, there won't be any knights. But you will be working most weekends. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4195 He survived the knifing attempt, but then we got him with a poisoned chalice. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4196 Well Harry, looks like we're really cutting costs this quarter... 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4197 Now let’s start the first phase of your interview. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4198 If you can remove it, the job is yours. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4199 Corporate's benefits and advancement policies are stuck in the Dark Ages. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4200 Bill wasn't lying about the garnish. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4201 All the previous CEO candidates failed this part of the interview process. Good luck, Arthur. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4202 Everyone thinks it's Excalibur but it turns out Damocles just had poor aim. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4203 If you can remove the sword, the office is yours. It's the only one with a view. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4204 Whoever pulls it out gets all the blame. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4205 Only he who lifts the sword from the...” “Or she. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4206 Not too many likes on his blog. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4207 Here at Excalibur,Inc. our promotion system is somewhat different. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4208 We expect a high ex-caliber of work from all our employees. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4209 This was the office of Mr. Damocles. He had joined the President’s legal team. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4210 You know what I'm thinking, Jeff?" "No, what? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4211 Welcome to the company Bob. It looks like your first assignment is a doozy. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4212 The activist shareholders have demanded a new CEO willing to make deep cuts. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4213 My suggestion for you is to get a stand up desk. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4214 The man is a genius. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4215 The last guy wanted the desk to be round. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4216 Now that is diversity! 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4217 Yes, I bagged the one in the middle in the summer of 1968...whilst on an LCD trip! 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4218 They call the sword Deskalibur. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4219 We’re still waiting for the right CEO 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4220 That means he's in the bathroom. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4221 Online searches haven't worked; so we thought we'd try this. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4222 It's our new "cut to the chase" applicant interview technique. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4223 You'd be wise to look under the desk. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4224 The boss might have slightly misinterpreted HR´s Round Table analogy. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4225 Why is there a sword in the desk 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4226 Speak no evil, do no evil, and tweet no evil. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4227 He hasn't quite mastered "Let it go, let it go" 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4228 I'm no King Arthur, but I'll give it a try. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4229 Only he who draws the sword is worthy of the corner office. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4230 What's the big deal? If you can't pull it out, get a new desk. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4231 The one who draws the sword will be crowned once and future chief accountant 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4232 Pull it out and the job is yours. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4233 No pens. Pens are mighty dangerous. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4234 Either a coffee break or poor corporate earnings. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4235 They say whomever can lift it will get a promotion 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4236 Whoever pulls the sword from the desk gets the window office. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4237 This is Arthur’s office. He’ll challenge you to remove the sword from the desk, but don’t fall for it - that’s his speciality. You can prove Project Management virtuosity other ways. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4238 The memo said "medieval cuts," but I thought they meant "midlevel." 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4239 Whoever pulls it out gets to be the new national security advisor. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4240 . . . and this is King Arthur's office. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4241 I've got a meeting with King Arthur in ten. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4242 Then I said: "Why should I apply? Everybody knows they want Arthur to be the new CEO." 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4243 We’ve streamlined the hiring process. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4244 We're going 'old school' for our next hire. If you can pull it out of the desk, you become the new CEO. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4245 Ah, yeah, he's staged another challenge. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4246 Looks like our accountant is ready for the upcoming budget cuts. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4247 This is what happened when Arthur changed to the rectangular table. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4248 It’s our new one-step hiring process. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4249 If the board doesn’t name a successor soon, we all might be working for Arthur the Intern. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4250 President Arthur just didn't have the same ring to it. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4251 yeah man, it just barely missed my enormous dick 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4252 He who pulls the sword from the desk shall take the chair. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4253 I think Arthur already went out to lunch. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4254 Now we just need to decide if we make this part or the first or second interview. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4255 The most important step of our interview process is usually quite brief. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4256 The Trump boys say they bagged it 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4257 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this wood and desk, is rightwise king of corporate America born. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4258 If you can remove it, the Publisher will make you the next King Author. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4259 Whosoever with one mighty tug removeth the sword shall reign as CEO. It's in the bylaws. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4260 It sure beats paying headhunter fees. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4261 We hear that’s why he ran for President... 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4262 He lets gentleness be his strong enforcement, but he doesn't entirely hide his sword. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4263 Only the rightful CEO is able to pull it out. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4264 And we replaced aptitude testing for this year's interns. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4265 This is what happens when you won't pull his finger. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4266 I'm going to guess that's a no for Bill Wallace on the severance package. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4267 We thought about a search firm, but our consultant told us this is the new thing in filling the CEO spot. It’s called “Sword Sourcing.” 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4268 I understand if youcan pull it out,you become President For Life. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4269 Can you tell Arthur we need him in here ASAP? 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4270 Exec-alibur 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4271 Experience and an MBA is all very well but you can't beat the appointment of an anointed one able to withdraw the 'Sword in the Desk'. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4272 Sorry, I thought King Arthur was down the hall 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4273 Susan likes to put the "severe" back in "severence package" 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4274 It's just a guess but I think job cuts are coming. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4275 Now to see the HR Lady of the Lake. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4276 ex calibur, ex smalibur; ex-job I think 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4277 Yours to blow, Art. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4278 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is rightwise king, born of Wall. Street. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4279 This is a helluva eviction notice. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4280 To become CEO, have to pull it out while singing "Camelot" 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4281 “Death of a Salesman” is required reading for all new employees. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4282 The CEO wants his son to feel like he deserves the promotion. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4283 And this is Mr. Knight's office. Arthur's in the hospital, but we're all pulling for him. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4284 It's an old HR trick. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4285 The letter opener is over kill 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4286 "I don't think he's coming back"! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4287 The next standard for identity authentication: Excalibur! 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4288 "NSFW". 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4289 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise King of the Corner Office. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4290 I'm guessing this last one is for Muller. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4291 The Round Table is in the corner suite. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4292 We're still trying to fill the once and future CFO position. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4293 Are you sure this is where he wants us to build a lake? 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4294 If only your timing was as sharp as your desk 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4295 Just pull it out and you get the CEO spot, the salary, options, bonus, and the "Golden Parachute" for when we get rid of you next year. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4296 "Pull it out and the office is yours". 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4297 ok! Arthur, pull it out then you'll get the job! 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4298 The kimono on casual Fridays...it all fits. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4299 Arthur has left the building. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4300 Legend says if you can remove it from the desk you are deemed the true CEO 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4301 This takes corporate backstabbing to a whole new level. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4302 Arthur says he'll take care of it when he's back from vacation. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4303 Admittedly the key to the executive washroom isn't the sovereignty of Britain, but still.. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4304 Careful, the guy before him got the axe! 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4305 This always happens when Arthur skips the round tables 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4306 The ex wasn't the right caliber. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4307 " On the other hand, this could be a bad omen ". 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4308 In this business, every day is a sword fight. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4309 I don’t remember ordering a desk that had a sword stuck in it... 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4310 He only gets email so he retired his letter opener. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4311 Your interview is actually an interactive test. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4312 Only the most truthful executive can remove the sword and ascend the throne to be CEO. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4313 Yup. I thought it might be Arthur’s. But no, definitely Damolcles. The head’s under the desk. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4314 I'll pass. You pull that and you're the laptop king till you drop, 80 hours a week minimum. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4315 It’s a really old desk. Predates the mighty pen... 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4316 The D and D chat room was the final straw. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4317 Braveheart was his favorite movie so I guess this is his form of retirement resignation. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4318 I've often felt that way about my desk, too. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4319 Walter’s pretty old school when it comes to letter openers. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4320 It looks like Damocles finally did get transfered to a district office. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4321 You may be the true king, Arthur, but any damages will be deducted from your office furnishings allowance. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4322 Arthur had very specific requirements for his successor. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4323 So, do you think you have what it takes to work at Pendragon Inc.? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4324 Well I suppose we're spending Saturday in an HR sensitivity training for poetic-rage management. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4325 Boss couldn't get the sword out of the stone so he just built the office around it. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4326 You should see his pen jar. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4327 Did her write a resignation letter? 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4328 It's Camelot somewhere. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4329 I told you it was particle board 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4330 I couldn't find a plastic knife. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4331 Personally I prefer the old CEO selection process. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4332 There she is: Excelibur. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4333 Whoever can pull out the sword is the new oval office replacement. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4334 Our boardroom has a round table. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4335 I think Ragnar, my new secretary just gave notice. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4336 Greg's taken cutthroat competition to a whole new level. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4337 No interview, just draw the sword from the desk and meet me at the round table in the board room. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4338 Arthur left the job after only two weeks. He said something about not being able to "handle the decor." 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4339 And who so ever shall pull this sword from out this desk, he shall be the true next vice president of marketing 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4340 Second thoughts about Pence? 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4341 Well you don't get to be king, but you do get some dandy stock options. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4342 It’s not Camelot, but you could rule accounting. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4343 Only one true born accountant can removeth Excel-ibur. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4344 So much for the Art of the Deal. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4345 Whoever pulls the sword out gets this office. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4346 Okay, Arthur, you're next. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4347 There not Receptionists anymore, their Executive Assistants. Get it right next time. That was close. 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4348 A nice pen would have been enough 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4349 Excalibur- You remove the sword and the office is yours. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4350 We should invest in a round table, David. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4351 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise CEO of, awh, who am I kidding, you'll just get yourself fired. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4352 No, I didn't try to pull it out. I don't need confirmation I'm not the hero. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4353 Damn Ocles - he's a showoff 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4354 O.K., no more role playing games during office hours. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4355 And, whomever shall pull-eth this sword from its embedding will have domain prominence in the executive washroom and an assigned parking spot. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4356 PULL IT OUT, GUESS THE PASSWORD, AND THE JOB IS YOURS! 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4357 Only the true CEO of the Camelot Company can remove the sword from the desk. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4358 When you called the new headhunter a 'wizard,' I thought you meant it figuratively. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4359 It's an earthquake, right? Quick, under the desk, right? Why Jenkins mounted that sword on the ceiling is still the big question. Anyway, the office is yours if you want it. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4360 The pen may be mightier but that is quite the statement. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4361 It must be that it's the sword that's mightier than the pen. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4362 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise mailroom king born. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4363 Merlin or Gotti? Do you pull it out or run for your life? 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4364 The Lady of the Lake says she is the rightful CEO since Arthur gave Excalibur back to her. She also wants a lake in her office. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4365 Not everyone on the Board is convinced this is the right criterion for selecting the next CEO. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4366 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise Deputy Project Coordinator for the Cleveland Branch born 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4367 Okay, Houdini, now I understand your disappearing act! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4368 HR is piloting a new process for succession planning 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4369 The buck stopped there. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4370 There are no 'do overs' at our level. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4371 Evidently it's the latest in password protection 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4372 The poor guy always said there was a sword of Damocles hanging over his job. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4373 If you pull out the sword, this window office is yours. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4374 And this is the succession plan… 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4375 He's off on a quest. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4376 ...but then we received an offer we couldn't refuse. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4377 Pull it out" he says, "Pull it out! Sounds like my wife. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4378 He who draws the sword works knights. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4379 This is Arthur's desk, he has a high eqo 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4380 No you don't become King, you just keep the job. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4381 When you meet him, make sure you compliment his "Game of Thrones" mouse. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4382 For the final job-applicant challenge, I'll leave you alone to prove your worth. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4383 She said anyone who can remove it will not have to go to the company retreat. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4384 Go ahead, try and remove the sword! 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4385 Well Arthur, this is your office. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4386 We've come up with a cutting-edge, rock-solid succession plan... 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4387 I double dare you. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4388 Legend says the desk is made of stone 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4389 Well, if you REALLY want to be CEO, go for it. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4390 Legend says that whomsoever doth pull the sword from the desk gets a key to the executive washroom. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4391 This is the last item on the aptitude test. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4392 But his out-of-office reply just says “gone fishin.” 1.1791 0.06354 67 59 4 4
4393 "Don't worry, it's made of balsa. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4394 Damocles will find you, even if you hide under your desk. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4395 I bet it was that witch in HR. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4396 Sorry I didn’t warn you; the stapler packs quite a punch. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4397 Actually, it's 'Caliburn.' The Excalibur was obtained later from a river nymph... Oh, never mind. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4398 It’s old school, but we’ll save a ton on headhunter fees. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4399 First one to pull the sword out of the desk gets the knight shift 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4400 I guess it's not a panel interview. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4401 Deb from HR thought it lent a Mists of Avalon element to the job recruitment strategy. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4402 If I were you I'd just leave it where it is. You're not exactly CEO material. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4403 We haven't been able to move it since Arthur was let go... 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4404 He felt it was the only humane thing to do when he went into retirement. 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4405 Huh, Excalibur! Whoever removes that sword will be CEO 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4406 Whichever one of us can pull the sword out of the desk gets this office. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4407 Not sure I want to be king anymore. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4408 Yes, your bonus is performance based. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4409 This is the Excaliber office...It's bullshit. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4410 Pull it our and you are the next Ceo of Excalibur Inc. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4411 The boss only comes in at Knight. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4412 (In the future) They finally beat the NRA and got rid of the guns. I guess it’s time to work on the National Sword Association. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4413 Glory is yours for the taking! Glory, and the executive washroom. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4414 Galahad called in sick today. 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
4415 I see King Arthur is out 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4416 Whoso pulleth our this sword from this desk, is right wise supervisor of Human Resources. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4417 First we heard thunder, then a flash of lightning, and suddenly the stone turned into a desk. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4418 Sessions is out just as soon as someone shows up at a press conference with the sword. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4419 Cool, I thought that option only came with the "round table". 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4420 Whom ever pulls the sword from the desk will be named CEO 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4421 A stage magician sold it to me for bail money. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4422 He’s toast — couldn’t hack it. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
4423 Arthur, would you do the honors? 1.1791 0.04720 67 55 12 0
4424 Okay, you get the job if you can pull that thing out. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
4425 Even the samurai miss sometime. 1.1781 0.04509 73 60 13 0
4426 It may be awhile until we find out who the new CEO will be. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
4427 I think Mel Gibson really wants to make Braveheart 2. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
4428 Seems Dudley Moore is our new CEO. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
4429 The Lady of the Lake said only someone brave, pure and noble could pull it out. I think we better move it out of the oval office. 1.1765 0.05904 68 59 6 3
4430 Becoming chairman is a challenge. 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
4431 What happened to the cloak? 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
4432 Legend has it, whoever can extract the sword will be the next Vice President of East Coast Marketing... 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
4433 All I know is she said the person who can pull it out can take over. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
4434 I think he's exaggerating in his role as executive producer of Excalibur. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
4435 This is not some Harry Potter bullshit. Please read another book. 1.1765 0.05904 68 59 6 3
4436 Wouldn't budge for me. Let's try the guy in the mail room. 1.1746 0.04821 63 52 11 0
4437 When is Arthur's vacation over? We need the sword for the ribbon cutting next week. 1.1739 0.05824 69 60 6 3
4438 Believe me, Frank, it's exactly as sharp as it looks. 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
4439 He was he master of Half truths! 1.1739 0.05824 69 60 6 3
4440 Your new office. Remember : we are serious about deadlines here. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4441 Arthur insisted this be the final-round interview for his replacement. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4442 Here in the UK branch of Global Thermometer, you are never fired. You're ex-calibrated. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4443 No, it's not symbolic, he just uses it to slice his bagels. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4444 The guy who used to be in here is on disability for really bad carpal tunnel. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4445 I’m not sure if I agree with our new corporate succession plan. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4446 It's just a letter opener, but he calls is "Excalibur" 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4447 The letter was delivered by Royal Mail - I thought it appropriate. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4448 But who really wants to be king of the accounting department? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4449 This is the next phase of the interview, any questions? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4450 Saying that the pen is mightier than the sword is an oversimplification. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4451 I don't know how Gold or Pillsbury does it, but here we follow tradition. 1.1719 0.06514 64 57 3 4
4452 His barbarism didn’t fit with our company culture, so we had to let Conan go. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4453 Legend has it that the one who removes this sword will have their vacation request approved by Management 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4454 They say it was placed here by the Lady of the Lake.... you know Helen in accounting. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4455 She said she wouldn't return to work until Jon Snow arrives to free up her desk, or the last novel is complete. Whichever comes first. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4456 You see, we're a meritocracy 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4457 I just spoke with a guy named Arthur, and he said he'd see what he could do. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4458 Whoever can pull it out becomes the new deputy assistant accounting manager. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4459 If you can remove it without a hostile work environment complaint, the job is yours. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4460 And here's your last interview. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4461 Everyone knows the pull-out method has a 100% success rate. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4462 Remove it and it's yours. The sword, that is. No one's insane enough to give you this job. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4463 Everyone knows that Joe lost his edge. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4464 And this is, according to legend, where we will discover who will be our next CEO. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4465 He's getting ready to downsize again! 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4466 We're waiting for Arthur 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4467 No, this is not related to cavalry. The CEO was under the table during the hostile takeover 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4468 There's the reason this position is now open. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4469 Pull it out and you can be CEO. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4470 Good luck, although you'd probably find it easier to pull the stick out of his butt. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4471 Do you think it's set in stone or there'll be another version? 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4472 If you want this promotion, Wilkins, you know what needs to happen. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4473 It found out it's being replaced by a standing desk. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4474 I wouldn't worry. He took his pen. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4475 Good thing your name is Arthur. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4476 Sometimes an expensive pen just doesn't hack it. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4477 Legend has it that he who retrieves the Sword from the Desk will become the rightful sovereign of the Great Corner Office with a view. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4478 Negotiate the extraction of this sword, and the CEO you shall become. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4479 This is exactly why we need a dispute resolution clause! 1.1719 0.06514 64 57 3 4
4480 I think we should page Lancelot 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4481 Tell the press! Siegfried finally pulled out the sword and it's our turn! 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4482 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise the new Attorney General, and shall keep the the sword in case she, also, can no longer recuseth herself. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4483 Should've worn more garlic before taking a nap. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4484 Hell of a way to pick a new CEO. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4485 Should we go get Arthur from accounting? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4486 And this is our office of succession planning. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4487 We call this the Sword ExChairman. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4488 The one who pulls it out becomes king of all he surveys. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4489 It's all in the wrist 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4490 We haven't found a good fit for this job, yet. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4491 You could see it coming when Mrs. Damocles got the business in the divorce. 1.1719 0.06514 64 57 3 4
4492 We tried to limit the search for a new CEO to applicants named 'Arthur', but legal nixed it. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4493 Frankly Donald....This does not look or feel like fake news. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4494 If he gets a round desk, I quit. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4495 Arthur’s in charge of budget cuts. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4496 The board is happy to have you as our new CEO, Arthur...if you can pass one final test. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4497 Whoever pulls it out will inherit this corner office. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4498 Jim needed to take a longer lunch today after his last appointment. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4499 It was a knight to remember. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4500 This is how we pick our CEO 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4501 I told him not to downsize the Samurai Warrior Department. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4502 Looks like he finally got the point. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4503 You know, he often treats us like serfs. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4504 It turned back into a desk after I stabbed it. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4505 Head hunting is now "self-performed". 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4506 The last person that freed the sword got the axe. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4507 Not a good day to ask for a raise. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4508 Get Arthur, quick. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4509 Well, looks like Arthur left the office. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4510 Maybe I shouldn't have told H.R. that this job would be cutthroat. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4511 It can't be removed until Trump is removed, or water turns to wine. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4512 You won't become king, but we'll give you some extra vacation days. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4513 His inbox is a little unusual. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4514 It's mid-millenium modern. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4515 We updated our privacy policy. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4516 Looks like an inside job. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4517 And so starts the legend of the sword in the credenza. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4518 Do you think he has a golden parachute? 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4519 Not sure what happened here but it doesn't look good. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4520 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise CEO of all Divisions. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4521 It is said that whomever removeth the sword can have his laptop square-on instead of at that awful neck-crinking angle. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4522 Double the stock shares if you can do it. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4523 The discussion was ended abruptly. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4524 At least he didn't tweet about you. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4525 We're waiting for our Machiavellian prince to show up. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4526 This was Arthur's office. He had angle issues. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4527 Slowly back out of the office and pull anything that looks like an alarm. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4528 I guess it's really the purse that mightier than the sword. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4529 So, Artie, pull it out and the VP for Regional Sales Management position is yours. After you sign the employee arbitration agreement and undergo our standard background check, of course. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4530 Actually, it is not a bad logo for a company that treats hemorrhoids. Applying our ointment is like freeing the sword and becoming King. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4531 We're still waiting on the right candidate 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4532 He who can pull it out gets a workspace. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4533 Where's King Arthur when you need him? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4534 Your predecessor was transferred to the crusades division. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4535 I still think the keyboard is mightier than the sword 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4536 Call Arthur from H.R. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4537 The price you pay for a corner office 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4538 We haven't quite cleared your new office. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4539 Excalibur LIVES ! My proof that this is MY DESK ! 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4540 He never liked that desk — called it a monster! 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4541 Well, it looks like Arthur finally resigned. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4542 The new boss believes in setting high expectations. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4543 Arthur King quit last week 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4544 His final words were,”It’s either me or the sword.” 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4545 Better go ask Arthur to come in here 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4546 At Facebook, we don’t just weaponize your private data. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4547 You sure this is where the 3:15 round table meeting is taking place? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4548 Vivianne took it pretty badly when he refused her that vacation time up at the lake. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4549 It looks like Damocles snuck out for an early lunch again. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4550 Call HR. Is Artie still in the mailroom? 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4551 This turnaround is going to take a legendary CEO. So first... 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4552 The CEO has decided. Arthur gets this office. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4553 He puts a lot of pressure on himself 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4554 I think the Lady in The Typing Pool put it there. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4555 Two-edged sword boomerangs. 'Live by the sword die by the sword' not drinking the cool-aid? 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4556 Conan has a very clear 'leave work at work' policy. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4557 There's only one job requirement. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4558 No one has occupied this position since King Arthur. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4559 The Board has one more requirement. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4560 Well, this is not England, my name's not Arthur, and my desk's not made of stone! 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4561 Turn the stock price around, you earn a $20 million bonus. If you don't, well... 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4562 The boss didn’t answer Katniss Everdeen’s question fast enough. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4563 Your mythical achievements precede you, Arthur. You pull the sword out of the desk, not only is the job yours, but interest rates will rise 10-15%, tops. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4564 He must be gone for the knight. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4565 The last guy said he couldn't get it out, I would just work around it 'til Arthur from facilities can take a look. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4566 It's been foretold that whoever pulls the sword from the desk is the rightful CEO. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4567 That's one way to get your point across. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4568 It is a new approach for selecting a new CEO. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4569 Too bad he is gone - he had great penmanship. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4570 I told you they were going to fire Conan. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4571 They call it merit based promotions. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4572 Typically concise. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4573 I asked for a high caliber desk. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4574 If you ask me, the Board has set their CEO search standards way too high. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4575 Lancelot came by but he was more interested in our receptionist. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4576 It still comes under my freedom of expression right? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4577 Looks like we'll find him at the jousting gym 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4578 How bad do you wan this job? 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4579 The competition got the Lady, AND the Lake. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4580 Don't believe all the myths about working here. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4581 Your predecessor just didn't have executive caliber. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4582 Well Arthur, if you want to become the new CEO... 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4583 And here's Art's desk. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4584 I wouldn’t touch it until after the S.E.C. fraud ruling comes down. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4585 We’ve eliminated performance evaluations. All you need to do is pull out the sword. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4586 The consultants on succession planning recommended this. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4587 I'm so nervous, pull my finger. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4588 It's a tough choice. If I pull it out, Rudy will put me on the President's defense team. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4589 Well this will sure change the shape of the candidate pool. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4590 I told you something swordid would happen to Frank eventually. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4591 A word to the wise, don’t broach the subject of a corner office. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4592 Donald and Hillary will be here at 4. Finally, our country should be able to move on. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4593 Pull it out of the desk and you get to be CEO. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4594 I thought we were an autonomous collective! 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4595 I think the new boss is trying to make point. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4596 You try it! I don’t want to be CEO. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4597 I worry its not aware of the impact of implicit biases 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4598 Bryan: “Woah, that is one big sword” Hector: “That’s what she said...” 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4599 I understand if you can pull out the sword, it becomes your desk. Maybe... 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4600 They have a generous encouraged-retirement plan. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4601 It gets harder and harder to get a corner office. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4602 Your name's Arthur, right? 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4603 Of course, since I live backwards in time, as soon as you pull that out I'm shorting the stock. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4604 Succession is an age-old custom here; see if you can pull the sword out of the desk. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4605 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise middle manager of all lower managers. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4606 Your new corner office. If you get bored, you can try to pull that sword thingie from the desk, but so far no one but Ferguson's kid has done it. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4607 You won't be king, you'll be CEO. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4608 Its either a message from the Board, or a challenge for the next CEO. Or both. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4609 Here at Excalibur Inc., we ask every employee to pull the sword from the hooker hiding under our leader's desk 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4610 Legend has it there's a millenial out there who can pull it to become our next CEO... so we don't let any of them up here. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4611 I wish he would have just named a successor. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4612 That seat's been vacant for years. Our board of directors is insisting on a candidate who can pull the sword out of the desk. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4613 Seems to me Arthur is taking his position as department head way overboard. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4614 Tantrums are so annoying. I'll call Maintenance. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4615 What do you think about our new CEO selection process? 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4616 I took a stab at it 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4617 Please don't cross the office manager, Damocles, a second time. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4618 It's actually a lever to open his trap door down to the dungeon 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4619 I'm not sure what the truth is about his sudden departure but I suspect it's terrible and swift. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4620 Mr. Excalibur is on lunch break. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4621 He just got back from Tintagel. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4622 H.R. is getting desperate to fill this position. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4623 Why does Arthur always do this to his desk? 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4624 Won’t need that vasectomy now! 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4625 The first one who can pull it out is CEO. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4626 ...so, we're experimenting with a new hiring policy... 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4627 The search committee's tactics seem a bit antiquated. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4628 And the last step in the onboarding process here at Are You Worthy Industries... 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4629 A hatchet-job we could deal with... 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4630 We used to have to jump through hoops for a raise. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4631 You should see what he does with his pen. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4632 When I heard that you and our young intern were "larping" in the office, this isn't what I imagined. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4633 It’s being considered for a #metoo still life. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4634 He must have left early for the Renaissance Weekend Festival, so I guess the meeting's cancelled. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4635 Want to get out of here. 1.1719 0.06514 64 57 3 4
4636 He has been acting a little defiant lately! 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4637 I heard the desk put up quite a fight. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4638 Where's the note? He usually leaves a note. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4639 The management can be a bit medieval but they give out raises if you can pull out the sword 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4640 I'm afraid to find out that my wife is cheating on me with Lance from accounting. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4641 In which Art prepares to pull the sword from the desk and prove himself worthy to rule to HR 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4642 How about you ask boss. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4643 I told you- death of the sitting desk is a thing! 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4644 They say if you can pull it out you get your very own dedicated assistant. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4645 This is Sarah's office. Her motto is the sword is mightier than the pen. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4646 Remove the sword and the job is yours. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4647 Looks like Art's a shoo-in for head of marketing. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4648 Pull it out and you get the knight shift. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4649 If you can pull that thing out, the job's yours. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4650 In light of some bad hiring calls, we've resorted to the 'Excalibur' method 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4651 You won’t find a pen in here. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4652 If I pull it out, do I get the job? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4653 And this could be all yours,Arthur. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4654 It's an envelope opener. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4655 Only the true ruler will be able to pull the sword from the spruce. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4656 I've never seen that before, have you Arthur? 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4657 The one who can pull the sword from the desk becomes the next CEO 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4658 Don’t worry, we’ve hidden all the pens. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4659 Is anybody else getting mixed messages, or is it just me? 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4660 Your desk and key to the executive bathroom. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4661 I said ‘let’s wordplay’ 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4662 R.I.P Boss 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4663 I bought on e-bay. It cost four Brit-coins." 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4664 Game of Thrones is keeping anyone from trying to pull out Excalibur. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4665 Looks like Kanye's "creating" again. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4666 He who pulls the sword from the desk is be king of the corner office 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4667 I thought he was getting the ax! 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4668 4CHAN's clues for the day: Do you think he's one of us? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4669 We were wrong. The computer isn't mightier than the sword. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4670 Oh, good. I was wondering where I left it. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4671 Arthur always did have a flare for the dramatic 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4672 There is just one last aspect to the application process. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4673 Congratulations, you've made the cut in this cutthroat business! 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4674 They say that if you can pull it out, you can tell the other executives where to get off. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4675 We have a particular quality we are looking for. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4676 He who pulls the sword from the desk is the true and rightful VP of Brand Strategy and Development. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4677 I see they're using Lady of the Lake executive recruiter service now. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4678 This is the fourth candidate this week. Bob, don’t you think this practice is a little outdated? 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4679 If a new CEO can't make it this way, there's the goddess-in-the-lake method for backup. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4680 Messy, but better than training. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4681 I guess the sword was mightier than the man... 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4682 The inscription reads "Never shall man take me hence but only he by whose side I ought to hang; and he shall be the best middle manager of the world." 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4683 Arthur's promotion seems to getting to his head. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4684 Go get Artie from facilities, he'll know what to do. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4685 It's time to visit Merlin in Legal Affairs. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4686 You'll be taking over for Bob. He was handling payroll for the Game of Thrones cast and crew when a totally unexpected tragedy occurred. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4687 So, all these interviews have been pretty brief. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4688 Good news, you now own a rare Napoleon era sword. Bad news, I'm guessing someone is onto your shenanigans. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4689 For your final part of the interview, attempt to remove the sword. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4690 She's got a slash career. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4691 Didn't you mention your cousin Arthur would be interested in the role? 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4692 The board is looking for a new CEO. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4693 Is the computer included? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4694 He literally meant "I'll be here be here all knight". Not a typo. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4695 The first interview is kind of tough. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4696 Legend has it, whoever removes it becomes King of Bathroom Code. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4697 LinkedIn, schmlinkedin...our hiring process for top talent is the stuff of legend. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4698 If you get the cultural reference you know what to do.... 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4699 The last executive in this office was the opposite of high caliber. You might say he was Excalibur. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4700 What is management trying to tell me? 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4701 They're trying a new hiring method to find a replacement for Weinsein. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4702 We really have to replace our knightly cleaning staff... 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4703 Succession planning designed by Merlin Inc. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4704 Wanna know how to make partner around here? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4705 The challenges of being HR Director at Excalibur Lance & Sword. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4706 You only need to pass this one test to get the job. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4707 Looks like he didn't get the raise. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4708 So that's how succession will be determined. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4709 And if you can pull this out, you can start immediately in the mail room. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4710 Only the one who can remove the sword is worthy of the promotion. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4711 It's the CEO's new test to see who is worthy of being her assistant. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4712 It scares the hell out of his subordinates! 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4713 Do you think they'll promote from within? 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4714 Yes, we upped the ante on passwords some time ago. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4715 This is just step one in the interview process. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4716 Now for the "mythic strength" part of the interview. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4717 Not it! 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4718 The latest tweet was the last straw. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4719 Whomever pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise a middle manager born 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4720 I’m glad I brought my pen. 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4721 He said to the pen, "Say it one more time..." 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4722 It's been there for a year-and-a-half -- ever since they decided they didn't want to pay for a headhunter . . . 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4723 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is the right wise CEO born of all Goldman Sachs. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4724 I always said you were his favorite, Arthur. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4725 He's been irreplaceable." 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4726 Here is your office...with a little reminder if you don’t perform well. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4727 They say that whomsoever shall draw the sword shall also sand and re-varnish the finish of the desk. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4728 I take it that Mr. Lancelot approves of our corporate price slashing proposal. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4729 Legend has’t he who free-eth the sw’rd ist granted an extra three full days after the close of each accounting period to submit his billable hours. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4730 No, you pull it out. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4731 England is safe. I superglued it. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4732 The CEO search committee's latest effort. 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4733 That's a killer wallpaper. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4734 I don't think this is the succession plan the board expected. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4735 he claimed he had a brave heart for business 1.1692 0.06032 65 57 5 3
4736 It was a close call for Stevens but his secretary wasn't as lucky. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4737 "It's for the search for the new CEO." Shelley Rodgers Alexandria, VA 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4738 The boss was very, very old school. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4739 Wait in here Arthur, the boss will be around in a minute to see you. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4740 Bob got the Excalibur contract. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4741 Those hedge fund guys play rough! 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
4742 He did say he’d take a stab at it. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4743 This ressolves the padded resume issue. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4744 Do you think he confused The Power of the Sword and Excalibur? 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4745 I'm not sure Edwards, Trump just left with a scowl on his face. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4746 You should see what he can do with a pen! 1.1692 0.06032 65 57 5 3
4747 Of course, Mr. Dodge, your résumé is quite strong. . . . But how are you with actual feats of strength? 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4748 Take that, Moses. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4749 Missed Again 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4750 Finally, before we send your paperwork down to HR, you'll have to remove the sword from the desk, just to make sure you're "the one". 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4751 Our search for a new CEO has taken a strange turn. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4752 Legend has it whoever pulls the sword from the desk becomes the next CEO. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4753 The board felt that we should be more selective in choosing our executives. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4754 Beats me. The last thing I heard him say was something about "plowshares." I thought he that was talking about one of those new hedge fund derivatives until I saw this. 1.1692 0.06032 65 57 5 3
4755 This will be your office, and of course meetings are held at a round table. 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
4756 It's a trap. They'll promote you to middle management. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4757 This could be good; or this could be bad. 1.1692 0.06032 65 57 5 3
4758 The job is yours if you can get rid of the old paper cutter. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4759 So Arthur, our numbers stink and we’ll probably be bankrupt within the year. But if you can pull out this sword, Camelot Industrial is all yours! 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4760 Succession planning. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4761 His stand up desk arrives tomorrow. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4762 He said he wants to test the strength of the company. 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
4763 Apparently, the board insists the next CEO orders a round table. 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
4764 Yeah, it is pricey, but I'd still splurge for the dismemberment policy. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4765 Think of it as your best shot to go from intern to employee. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4766 Guess Howard wants us to know he stuck to the job until the end. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4767 I felt surprisingly unrepentant about shooting that one. 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4768 This desk goes. Our new owners are shipping one over with a Samurai sword. 1.1692 0.06032 65 57 5 3
4769 We're holding out of the right candidate. 1.1692 0.06032 65 57 5 3
4770 I think the boss is trying to tell you something. 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
4771 I mean, I did tell him to make his new office "legendary". 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4772 I won’t tell if you don’t. 1.1692 0.06032 65 57 5 3
4773 not what you think- they've already picked the new CEO 1.1692 0.06032 65 57 5 3
4774 Forget the benefits package. If I pull it out, do I get to keep it? 1.1692 0.05174 65 55 9 1
4775 It's a phallic symbol, what do you think it is? 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4776 Arthur felt that he was worthy for the position, and yet.... 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4777 Tell the defense team "pull out my sword" was literal. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4778 We're looking for a CEO who is a real miracle worker. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4779 He is here to trim the budget 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4780 Mr. Pendragon, HR is never going to approve this as our new interview process. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4781 It's a message from his wife. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4782 This office has been vacant ever since Arthur was fired 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4783 Does that mean he is at lunch? 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4784 What do you say we try to settle this case. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4785 Interesting Deskchop. 1.1667 0.06326 66 59 3 4
4786 So how did that raise request go? 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4787 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is, unfortunately, right wise a presidential Cabinet member born of all the United States, or at least 46.1%. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4788 I understand he's look for his successor. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4789 ... and then the job is yours. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4790 Welcome to the rest of your life, here are your essentials. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4791 Samson was using paper plates again, get Arthur over here. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4792 Naturally, Arthur thinks its for him. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4793 It cuts down on the time it takes to open the snail mail. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4794 Remove it and the job is yours, Stevens. And yes, WD40 would be cheating. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4795 The board just had their retreat at Medieval Times-pull it out and you are the new CEO. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4796 I'm changing the corporate governance. It's going to be a monarchy. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4797 It's a manual paper shredder and 'Do Not Disturb" enforcer. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4798 My Secret Santa came by 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4799 Did I mention some of our competitors think we are still in the Dark Ages? 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4800 Removing the sword maybe not the best way to chose a CEO, but go ahead give it a try. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4801 He plans on making some serious cuts. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4802 He drove the point in really well. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4803 Uh, Ned, looks like you got mail 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4804 The new headhunter’s old-school. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4805 The last guy who had this office was a prince. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4806 Where's Arthur? We need him now! 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4807 Pull it out and you can cancel Brexit. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4808 so the performance appraisals are in 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4809 They gave her one of those new-fangled pencil sharpeners, I see. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4810 Where was the knight watchman? 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4811 Only he who is destined to pull the sword will be crowned regional manager. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4812 He thinks we should call him King Arthur. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4813 Is that the new Excalibur? 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4814 There is a manual for how to remove it, but it's written in a strange language. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4815 Artie said to wait here for him. He has some kind of new executive leadership test for us. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4816 The desk is for Ms. Arthur from #MeToo. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4817 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise promotion born. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4818 Legend has it that whosoever can draw the sword from the desk will rule this floor and all who toil here. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4819 Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords may not be a viable basis for a system of government, but given our current situation, a trip to the pond might be worth our while. 1.1667 0.06326 66 59 3 4
4820 Here is where we select Knights of the Rectangular Table. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4821 The boss is obsessed with disproving adages. He tried the same antic last week with a pen. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4822 He left abruptly. Claimed he was late for a meeting in Nottingham. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4823 Whoever can pull that out of the desk will be our Once and Future CEO! 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4824 Lance, can you please see if Mr. Pendragon or Mr. Galahad are in today? 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4825 So, if I pull it out that means I get to be the boss, right? 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4826 Does it come with a secretary? 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4827 Promotion time already? 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4828 He's a weekend warrior. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4829 On second thought, let's go ahead and approve that personal day Sir Joey requested. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4830 So what is this supposed to be? The excalibur of middle management? 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4831 Mr. Arthur wanted to be sure his replacement is worthy of the position. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4832 For that effort, they'd have to give me a corner office. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4833 Free the sword, all all of our corporate debt shall be yours. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4834 I guess the pen IS the sword here, huh? 1.1667 0.06326 66 59 3 4
4835 We’re trying to attract a better pool of candidates. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4836 Wonder Woman can no doubt deal with that 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4837 Let's see what Donald does with this! 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4838 I liked Lance a lot, but he was never Excalibur material like Arty. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4839 Sorry sir, I thought it was hardwood 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4840 I think the boss is trying to motivate you Art. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4841 I heard Arthur was out today. You know they call him the king of the corporate world. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4842 The tax man must have come again 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4843 She calls it "Excel-ibur" 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4844 I've heard that our new boss is a strict arthuritarian. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4845 Well...if you can remove it, this office is yours. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4846 He always does this when the Met puts on a new production of the Ring cycle. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4847 Sure, “Whoever pulleth this sword from the desk is crowned CEO...” but it comes with 35 counts of fraud and insider trading. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4848 THIS is our transition plan? 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4849 If we can _ever_ get HR’s approval there is going to be a big reward for anyone who can remove it. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4850 Something is a myth. 1.1667 0.05403 60 51 8 1
4851 That’s asking a lot from interviewees. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4852 It's been a challenge, finding a replacement for Benson. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4853 Strange way to announce a bankruptcy. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4854 He wasn't of the right calibre. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4855 Lancelot would never give up, not even with a white flag of surrender on the horizon and a storm cloud over his chair. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4856 Sad really, Charles was successful but the hernia killed him. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4857 The next time Mueller rings, take that call! 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4858 This is our Employee Complaints Manager’s office... 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4859 ‘You are our last great hope Arty.’ 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4860 Great, another remake with a modern spin. how original. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4861 I realize this is Trump Tower, but even this won’t make him king. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4862 And this, this the office of The Metaphor, who has the overall say on strategic direction. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4863 Barb, get me the Lady of the Lake on the phone. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4864 Isn't it about time we change our CEO succession policy? It's been 30 years. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4865 We couldn’t save Monica Lewinsky 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4866 Management position open: by divine appointment only. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4867 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this stone top desk is rightwise CEO 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4868 He left for a more congenial spot. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4869 I told him DiCaprio was blonde. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4870 It’s there waiting for the next great cost-cutter to come along. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4871 Our process takes longer than a traditional executive search, but you’ll find the results are nothing less than exceptional. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4872 But first ask yourself, "Do I really want to be CEO?" 1.1667 0.04852 60 50 10 0
4873 We conceded the corner office but apparently he was pretty serious about the round table. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4874 I'll pay to have it removed. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4875 I believe the new man is "Arthur"... 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4876 Ok, so the weapon is here, but where's the final boss we have to defeat? 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4877 There’s neither a lake nor a lady. 1.1667 0.06326 66 59 3 4
4878 Kathy took a few precautions when she started maternity leave... 1.1667 0.05903 60 52 6 2
4879 The round table is no match for the corner office. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4880 And he ordered a round table for the conference room. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4881 I guess Arthur was a little tiffed about the new digs. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4882 I have this uneasy feeling the kid from the mailroom is going to be our next CEO. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4883 "....and then I'll know if I get the promotion? 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4884 But my back was there last night ? 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4885 If this doesn't get Prince Harry to run our company, nothing will 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4886 No, our CEO is literally a double edged sword. 1.1667 0.06326 66 59 3 4
4887 I admire Dr. Swordsley’s work, but who even uses a land line anymore? 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4888 Oh... In the email I thought Arthur was having us come in Saturday to deal with the 's'-word on his desk 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4889 Whosoever shall draw yon sword from yon desk doth get the $25 million CEO package. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4890 The first one who can remove it from the desk..... yada, yada, yada. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4891 ...and this is the final test. If you can pull the sword, the job is yours. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4892 Then you have to pull it from the rock...I mean desk. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4893 She said her leadership style is a new approach based on West World. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4894 The path to promotion here is a little too Arthurian. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4895 They did said Arthur would have to earn CEO the traditional way... 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4896 Good thing some people are bad at backstabbing. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4897 You're right, the bobblehead was better. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4898 'He who draws the sword in fear, Hastens death, which is near.' I just thought of that. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4899 Apparently if you can pull it out, you become the Southeast Lower District Assistant Synergy Manager 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4900 Arthur sure goes out to lunch with Lance a lot. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4901 But we'll be meeting in the new Knights of the Round Table-themed conference room. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4902 Looks like the board has gone Arthurian to select a new CEO. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4903 It’s simple, Lancelot. Remove the sword from the desk and you get this as your office. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4904 I heard they were cutting middle-management next. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4905 Its either a test for the next company president or IT trying out a new cyber security program. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4906 Before I can give the okay to hire you, remove the sword from this desk. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4907 The old mahogany is the new stone. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4908 Can someone please tell King Arthur this is pure nepotism. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4909 But I thought Arthur had a pretty good quarter 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4910 It was HR’s idea! 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4911 Arthur just couldn't hack it anymore 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4912 I knew letting Bob watch the holy grail last night was a mistake. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4913 O'Leary didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition, but he got it anyway. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4914 Whomever pulls this out gets free parking for a month. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4915 Other people got the axe when we right-sized, but Fenster was special. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4916 The new guy insists we call him Merlin. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4917 In five years, it vests into plowshares. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4918 Better get Arthur of Facilities in here 1.1667 0.06326 66 59 3 4
4919 He decided to join the Knights Templar. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4920 I'm regretting using that "Aruthurian" search process for our next CEO. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4921 He takes the game playing to a whole new level. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4922 Trust me, you won't see another one of these anywhere. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4923 Depends on how many vacation days a king gets 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4924 The Gods have finally spoken! 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4925 Coming upon the magic sword Excalibur, not knowing the new HR policy, Arthur becomes the new CEO. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4926 Finally, Arthur realized his destiny. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4927 Our board of directors is very selective. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4928 You might say it's a double-edged sword. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4929 Where is Merlin when you need him? 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4930 We figured this was the safer way to elect our next president. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4931 The only alternative is an apprenticeship. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4932 Our bylaws say if you can pull out the sword, you’re destined to lead us through bankruptcy. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4933 Somehow I thought the Board would be making the final decision. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4934 Yes, Artie- you might be the company's next CEO. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4935 We're creative & original here at CEO Corporation. So many companies give people the axe, its become trite. Our marketing department wanted to differentiate us from the pack. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4936 Well, go ahead. Let’s see if you’re the one meant for the job as our new CFO. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4937 Whosoever pulleth this sword from this desk, shall become CEO of Trump Towers. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4938 The computer, the lamp, and the chair all think the sword did it. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4939 It is said that he who can remove the sword from the desk shall become the next Head of Human Relations. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4940 He didn't have a pen. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4941 I know it looks weird, but they say Merlin's the best executive search results in the industry. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4942 I quit. ha ha fake news. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4943 Arthur always meets at the round table in the conference room. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4944 This is a new way to stop office backstabbing 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4945 I told him Viking investors was a bad idea. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4946 He's no knight in shining armor! 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4947 The one who can pull the sword from this desk is destined to do great things in this business. If you can't, please have the secretary show you the way out. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4948 Let's get that kid from the mailroom.... think I saw him reading Camelot. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4949 Medieval Times won't have a CEO until the Chosen One pulls it out. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4950 We're not allowed to call it a 'broadsword' anymore. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4951 I lured her in with my magic flute. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4952 How did you know he was hiding under the desk? 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4953 Pretty much anybody can pull it out. The trick is using it successfully to fend off Carl Icahn. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4954 That’s going to leave a mark. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4955 I call it Excalibureau. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4956 I heard whoever can remove it becomes head of Accounts Payable. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4957 It looks like this desk has been claimed. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4958 I guess Quimby failed the new performance appraisal. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4959 How do you think Sarah Huckabee Sanders will spin the tale of how" he fell on his sword"? 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4960 You now guys, the unicorn was the Black Swan of the Middle Ages. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4961 Zounds! 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4962 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise Director of Supply Chain Management. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4963 They say whoever can remove it will become the king of middle management. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4964 Always testing us.” 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4965 The boss agrees that 'the pen is mightier', but he's also a fan of underdogs 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4966 When I asked the building manager to rid me of this terrible desk I assumed it would go into storage. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4967 We've streamlined our interview process. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4968 Your resume indicated leadership as one of your skills… 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4969 Friday is Sword and Sandals Casual. 1.1667 0.05403 60 51 8 1
4970 This one doesn't come with a wizard, but a crafty tax attorney. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4971 I'll go get Arthur from HR. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4972 The successful candidate also receives the poisoned chalice. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4973 He wants us to play Game of Thrones again. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4974 You're correct. That's an original Seth Thomas Tambour. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4975 I am now thinking steak for lunch. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4976 Get that intern Arthur in here to clean this up. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4977 He thinks of objects as people. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4978 Legend has it that he who can remove the sword, will be CEO. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4979 This is a test of willpower, which you've listed here on your resumé... 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4980 It overheard them talking about replacing him with a more ergonomically correct desk. 1.1667 0.06326 66 59 3 4
4981 Who will be the true heir of Jack's office? 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4982 Alright, Artie, whoever draws the sword from the desk gets the corner office. Good luck. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4983 The president will kill us when he gets back from his golf trip. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4984 According to the legend, he who pulled the sword from the stone was the one and true king. But this was just a drunken tantrum. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4985 Perhaps our interview process is too tough. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4986 I think the new union steward is one to reckon with. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4987 The rumors of disharmony in this administration are fake news. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4988 Umm...last time I tried to pull something on your recommendation it was your finger, and you farted. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4989 He'll be hard to replace. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4990 They say his contract was written in stone. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4991 We're inclined to believe that the Director has tendencies related to a market crash, but we do not know if it's for him or us. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4992 We're still looking for someone who knows Quickbooks and is the rightful heir to Britain. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4993 We seem to be having difficulty finding a new CEO. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4994 I don't know about this. The last time Andy had me pull his finger, it didn't go well. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4995 Don't bother, Arthur... after 13 years in the mailroom you're not destined to lead the company 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4996 The I.R.S. has finally gone paperless. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
4997 We really need to get better at succession planning. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4998 On your desk are all the tools you'll need for a successful career here at the hedge fund. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4999 The Lady of the Lake is hiding under the desk. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5000 When President Trump said he needed help pulling his sword out. We never expected this. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5001 Our HR department is a bit too literal... and underfunded. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
5002 I have the feeling he won't be getting that Assistant Manager position. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5003 Sword in desk. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
5004 Legend says whoever can pull the sword from the desk gets to fire Bill. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5005 This is the final step in the interview process. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5006 A bit overboard if you ask me. If he didn't want people using his desk he could have just sent out a company wide memo. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5007 It's the stage set for our new reality show, "Excalibur", a contest to find out who is the most qualified to be the President. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5008 So are we to assume that this is the work of Mueller's team? 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
5009 The hiring process here get tougher every year. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5010 Legend has it that only the true Associate VP of Human Resources can remove it. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5011 Not much gets done when he goes on vacation. 1.1667 0.06326 66 59 3 4
5012 Oval office 2020 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5013 I've heard of burying the hatchet ......and drawing the line ........ they must be confused with how to use a paperweight ...... 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
5014 It says on the blade , 'Whosoever pulleth out this sword out of the desk shall be rightwise CEO born of all Uber. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5015 I warned him "Jones, don't practice that Champagne Sabering technique at the office." But would he listen...noooo! 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5016 I think we should get a different letter opener. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5017 And if you don't feel mighty enough with that, there are pens in the top drawer. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5018 He has officially taken manifesting too far. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5019 Ah. The meeting is over. So. The pillaging must have begun. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5020 Sorry. Looks like he’s done for the day. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5021 He had to cut and run 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5022 We've been waiting for three years for someone to be worthy of being CEO. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5023 I wish picking a new CEO were easier, but this is what HR insisted on. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5024 ...”apparently the knight called it a day” 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
5025 Looks like the meeting with H.R. didn't go very well. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
5026 Final step in the interview process Mr. Jones 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5027 It's new...just get under the desk for the self-stabbing-in-the-back . 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5028 Since when do they make desks out of stone? 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5029 So far, our CEO search hasn't been successful. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
5030 Pull out Excalibur and you can jump out the window too. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5031 New research suggests that the sword may, in fact, be mightier. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5032 It is said that only the one who lifts the sword shall give work efficiency reports to their subordinates. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5033 Remove the Sword; you become CEO. Can't? You become the janitor. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
5034 We’re going for a more traditional type of CEO selection process. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5035 I’m not sure how to take this ...... 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
5036 Art's not in his chair now, but he's certain to be back. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5037 The last guy gave it a good stab 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5038 He definitely wants the shaving company to go back to a single blade. 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
5039 Here at Pendragon, it's a motivational tool. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5040 Arthur's the man for that job. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5041 It's quid pro quo for our glass ceiling. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5042 Yes, the new method of choosing our president is a bit odd but we all think it will be a huge improvement. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5043 He’s been taking these roundtables pretty seriously. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5044 That’s Siegfried’s desk, it’s 100% reclaimed ash from Nibelheim. 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
5045 So much for tha "pen is mightier than the sword" thing! 1.1667 0.05946 66 58 5 3
5046 I saw this coming... 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
5047 Smythe was fired for playing Dungeons & Dragons on company time. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5048 We're still looking for a new CEO. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5049 Been that way since we moved in. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5050 Our CEO was a magician who settled for a desk job. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5051 The Chief apparently disagrees with the Board's funding of Project Plowshares 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5052 No successful applicants in years...I think we need to modify the qualifications for the job... 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5053 You can only get tech support for the computer if you’re worthy and successfully remove the sword from the desk. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5054 Tell Siegmund to get up here ASAP for Nothung. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5055 Okay, Arthur, here's your shot at Regional Sales Manager. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5056 The CEO selection process is very intense this year. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5057 Who knew succession planning could be so retro? 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5058 If you can pull it out, you're out new leader. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5059 I've decided that whoever can pull out the sword will inherit the company. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5060 HE"S VERY POSSESSIVE OF HIS DESK. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5061 Bet you the boss had a sleepless knight. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5062 Promotions are hard to come by here. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5063 "Bob, you know the old adage that hard work and a little luck gets to you the top of the corporate ladder? Well, in our company it's a little different". 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5064 tough vetting process 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5065 This part of the interview process is short and self explanatory, let me know when you're done. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5066 Arthur really doesn't like anyone touching his desk. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5067 Hmmmm. OK where is O.J 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5068 Max is a true weekend warrior 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5069 Well, there you have it. 'Super' calls this fragile Excalibur myth really quite atrocious! 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5070 LeBron's been here 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5071 It's said that whomever can get the sword out will become CEO. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5072 Slight imperfection? Does that look like a slight inperfection to you? 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5073 The boss is obsessed with King Arthur; in lieu of submitting a resume, you can try to remove the sword. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5074 I told Russell not to sharpen the sword. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5075 I know, it's an odd way to take over as CEO of a flour company, but you have to pull out the sword before you can assume the job. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5076 Not my idea of an informational interview. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5077 Excalibur, who first? 1.1639 0.06264 61 54 4 3
5078 He who draws the sword from the desk, he shall be executive. 1.1639 0.06264 61 54 4 3
5079 We're still looking for the right man. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5080 Well, either an MBA or this. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5081 It was hard when we had to tell him we couldn't bury him here. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5082 Alert Charles. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5083 Only the one true manager can pull the sword from the corner office. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5084 Don’t mind him, he’s not the sharpest knife. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5085 Looks like Mr. Highlander is out for lunch 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5086 The note says he has gone Wagner. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5087 Sexual harassment is not tolerated here. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5088 It takes a special person to occupy this office. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5089 You've got a killer imagination. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5090 I hope he appreciates how we've monetized Camelot. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5091 This is Sir Arthur's desk. We do not dare. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5092 There was no stone, so now he is king of the U.S. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5093 Whoever pulls it will be are next CEO. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5094 If anybody asks, just say your name is Arthur, okay? 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5095 He just said "Excalibur" right before he left. It has been tough ever since. 1.1639 0.06264 61 54 4 3
5096 I thought Art was happy with his promotion to VP. But, oh no, only being King Arthur will do. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5097 Mr. Damocles is now in the Federal Witness Protection Program. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5098 Ex-calibur! er... caliber. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5099 It’s gotta be a warning sign. Join his live action role playing or else. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5100 For true glory, remove the sword and slay the competition. Or just have a seat and collect your $15M CEO salary. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5101 I told him we didn't have any round desks. 1.1639 0.06264 61 54 4 3
5102 The last one pulled the sword all right, but was fired when the Grail got poor returns. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5103 If you can pull it out, the job is yours. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5104 This is how we fire someone at Excalibur. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
5105 Oh oh- they’re back! 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5106 Think of the money it will save us on headhunters. 1.1639 0.06264 61 54 4 3
5107 The successful candidate will extract the sword. 1.1639 0.06264 61 54 4 3
5108 He heard his name on TRMS; then he heard her say, "Stick a pin in this". 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5109 Mr. Damocles just stepped out for a moment. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5110 My kid, Arthur, could pull it out. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
5111 New company policy. Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise CEO. 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5112 There's a whetstone in the break room if you need it 1.1639 0.05811 61 53 6 2
5113 Hope you can pull it out-it’ll come in handy at tomorrow’s stockholders meeting... 1.1618 0.05780 68 60 5 3
5114 Whoever pulls the sword from the desk will be our CEO until we figure out a more effective screening process. 1.1618 0.05387 68 59 7 2
5115 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise Director of all HR. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5116 Whoever removith this sword shall be personal assistant to the vice president for facilities development. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5117 Apparently the search committee couldn't agree. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5118 Legend says that he who can remove the sword will have more room to stack file folders. 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5119 It wasn't even a question of sticking a fork in him... 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5120 Our board is legendary. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5121 I'm getting tired of all the knights at the office. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5122 Last sword fight he had was in the men's room. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5123 No one seems to be destined for this role. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5124 I was expecting a round table weren't you? 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5125 I think the Board has lost faith in the interview process. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5126 My boss finally got a feel for the meaning of a pain in the neck. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5127 At Excalibur, Inc. we're big on transparency. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5128 His sword is mightier than his laptop. 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5129 They said any intern who can pull it out of the desk gets a job when they graduate. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5130 He stows it there between backs. 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5131 We ran it past HR, there may be some issue with using upper body strength as a prerequisite for an executive position. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5132 Call HR. This might take a while. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5133 I think that he may be working remotely today. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5134 Mr. Arthur has never really been much of a talker. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5135 As you might imagine, Arthur's promotion created quite a bit of excitement around here. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5136 The furniture rental company is saying he won’t get his deposit back. 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5137 Occasionally, he goes Medieval on us. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5138 Arthur is taking his promotion way too seriously. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5139 Untangled phone cords are a symptom of ... do I smell tacos? 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5140 She took the new "Caliber" with her, and stuck her "Ex" right there! 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5141 I know the board usually picks the CEO, but we do things a little differently here. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5142 The one who can pull the sword out gets a promotion. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5143 Elon did say that he'd have a strong visual for the board. 1.1613 0.06582 62 56 2 4
5144 With the monster at the helm I've been hoping Galahad would show up. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5145 Trump owns the building, but still failed to pull it out. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5146 Gee I guess the new CEO was serious about more budget cuts. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5147 I told you a sword chandelier was a bad idea. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5148 And this is Arthur's office. He decided he didn't like the shape of his desk. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5149 Bob’s just going through “Game of Thrones” separation anxiety. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5150 Pen beats sword, but sword beats laptop 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5151 Is that a message? 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5152 This promotion seems increasingly unlikely. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5153 They say whoever can wield the Sword in the Desk is granted a golden parachute and complete judicial immunity. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5154 Who do think is under there, Harry or Kerry? 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5155 So the thread finally broke. I always knew that being a classics major would come in handy someday. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5156 I suppose his name is not Arthur. 1.1613 0.06582 62 56 2 4
5157 We changed vendors for office supplies. It's our new 'While You Were Out' memo holder. 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5158 Lancelot has left the building. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5159 Guess he's making cuts. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5160 I said the project was "dragging on", not "a dragon"!!! 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5161 It appears that Arthur has left the premises. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5162 If you can pull it out, Arthur, you're the new CEO. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5163 Our former CEO didn’t fully embrace the whole stone thing. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5164 You get three tries. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5165 They’re never going to find a new CEO if they only interview guys named Arthur. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5166 They say whoever pulls the sword from the desk is the true owner of Round Table Pizza. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5167 Anyone who can remove the sword gets to be CEO at a salary 666 times the median employee salary. 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5168 We're looking for a CEO who'll take some risks. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5169 Not only is the pen mightier than the sword, it's easier to swallow. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5170 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk shall be CEO. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5171 Looks like the Private Equity guys are here. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5172 What's next? Not being able to compliment female coworkers? Taking away our metal desk boners? 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5173 Up until then, it was my granddaughter's favorite birthday party. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5174 His parents didn't name him Beowulf for nothing. Looks like TheVikes lost another tough one. 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5175 Our corporate bylaws ordain that whosoever pulls the sword from this desk becomes CEO of King Arthur Flour. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5176 Looks like we're down to the last few interviewees. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5177 Just watch where you put your feet. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5178 Things people do when you're on vacation ... 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5179 It’s just an internship, but if you can pull this out, I'll see what I can do. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
5180 He thinks the sword and the word are equally mighty. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5181 Either someone stole your pen or we're ready to declare a winner. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5182 I pity the guy who stole his “You-don’t-have-to-be-crazy-to-work-here-but-it-helps’ sign. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5183 A guy named Merlin something came up with it. You wanna run a department? Give it a yank. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5184 Jim, I think you're taking this King Arthur stuff a little too far 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5185 It's as good a way to pick the next CEO as any other. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5186 Too bad Smith didn't know, but Maintenance has stem cell horse hairs that don't break as often. You should call for one after you get settled in. 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5187 Apparently, Arthur was a king before coming here 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5188 We've had cuts in Human Resources. 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5189 No worries. Plus an honors MBA from Harvard or Chicago. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5190 Extracting it to obtain the job is not the difficulty. Using it to maintain the position, that is where strength and bravery come in to play. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5191 We may not be Camelot, but then, no one has been able to pull that sword from this desk. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5192 Bob always took "corporate raiding" a little too literally. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5193 Who knew the CEO was a cosplayer....? 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5194 If I can pull it out, do I become C.E.O.? 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5195 Oh, Excalibur again. I thought that was all settled 1600 years ago. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
5196 Okay, Artie, the CEO job could be yours. Ready to give it a try? 1.1613 0.06168 62 55 4 3
5197 It certainly hasn't been the same around here since he lost the joust. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
5198 Our previous interview process was far too complicated. 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5199 But more importantly, if you pull it out, you get to become CEO. 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
5200 The company has added a new task to the pre-employment evaluation. 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
5201 "Mr. O'Brien, sincere apologies, but the network wasn't able to secure rights to Zena : Warrior Princess..." #SecretHistoryOfTheWalkerTexasRangerLever 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5202 It’s the desk left by President Kennedy. 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5203 Call Artie down in Maintenance -- maybe he can figure a way to get it out. 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
5204 The last "annointed one" only used it to open three envelopes. 1.1587 0.04641 63 53 10 0
5205 The new professor said his name was Arthur but then they found out he lied on his resume. 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
5206 Whosoever shall pull this sword from the Desk of Accounting shall rule over the Kingdom of Receivables. 1.1587 0.06074 63 56 4 3
5207 Truly impressive that you have 30 years of experience at 25, now just one last step. 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5208 It took a lot of blood, sweat and tears but she finally forged the deal. 1.1587 0.06482 63 57 2 4
5209 That's not the only way to hone your skills, Schmidlef! 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5210 Sorry, we're still swording out your office 1.1587 0.06074 63 56 4 3
5211 Better call Arthur. Once he pulled out one like this. 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5212 Have you tried lowercase "excalibur1"? 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
5213 It appears we've lost the Excalibur account. 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
5214 I hope you're prepared for the interviews strength assessment... 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
5215 I always knew he was a back stabber. 1.1587 0.06482 63 57 2 4
5216 Although he was not able to pull it out, Trump decided to be King anyway. 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5217 I just knew that would go to his head. 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5218 Whoever pulls it out gets the job. 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5219 I consider it an indirect demonstration that the pen is mightier than the desk. 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5220 I don't blame him for running 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5221 We used to call him Rexcalibur. 1.1587 0.06074 63 56 4 3
5222 Pull out the sword and the job is yours. 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
5223 I think this office was claimed. 1.1587 0.04641 63 53 10 0
5224 Just lean in. 1.1579 0.05478 57 49 7 1
5225 If you can pull it out, you get the office. 1.1579 0.04873 57 48 9 0
5226 He speaks softly!! 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
5227 You've got to hand it to him; he knows how to cut a deal! 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
5228 pull the sword from the desk and you become the CEO 1.1562 0.05984 64 57 4 3
5229 Legend has it, the next to pull it out is our new CEO 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
5230 Pull it from the desk and you can become the King of all of Acme office supply!! 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
5231 Let's Move. 1.1552 0.05390 58 50 7 1
5232 I thought this was supposed to be a round table. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5233 Our company picks its CEO differently from most. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5234 Well, there are worse ways to pick a CEO 1.1525 0.06758 59 54 1 4
5235 It’s a hologram. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5236 That’s the desk of Merlin, our executive recruiter. They say he’s a wizard at finding new leadership. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5237 So if Trump pulls it out he'll be king of America? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5238 They didn't mention this step at the leadership seminar. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5239 Gambling debts? His ex? Camelot? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5240 Barring a removal, next week it will be hot coals on the floor. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5241 When you finish here, meet me at the round table in the cafeteria. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5242 In order to be considered for this position you must have a unique skill set. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5243 Whoso pulleth out the sword from this desk is rightwise Vice President of Human Relations 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5244 This was his first lie. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5245 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk and corner office, is rightwise middle-management born. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5246 This is how we plan to choose the next communications director. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5247 Sadly, Jennings was looking for a paper clip and never knew what hit him. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5248 Just wait til you meet your direct reports. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5249 OK Jerry, let’s see if you are the true ruler of the office. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5250 Hmmm...I say we just give him the pink slip. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5251 The board suggested Arthur take a Sabbatical. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5252 It's the last test for control of our British sector. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5253 The in-house blacksmith reacted poorly to the new dress code. There's a section on aprons that he disagrees with. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5254 At least he wasn't fired. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5255 Worst Excalibur prize ever. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5256 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise king born of all middle management 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5257 He said he wanted a round table, then he left. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5258 So all I have to do is pull out the sword and I get the job? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5259 I guess payday came early 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5260 Pull it out and you're the new CEO, Arthur. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5261 Turns out his password was "Excalibur 1234". 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5262 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise middle-management born. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5263 It's an invitation to rule your very own bureaucracy. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5264 I'll call in the next one, then. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5265 Tough luck , Galahad. Gosh, I think the only guy left is Art in the mail room. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5266 He was just trying to make a point. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5267 Poor chap. He was well educated: Harvard and all that. He should have known that when the sword has your name on it, hiding under your desk is futile. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5268 My calendar showed the meeting with Lancelot was scheduled for next week. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5269 Instead of an employment interview we use this special test. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5270 ... and if you can pull it out, you become CEO of the company with a generous severance package. Next, I’ll show you the break room ... 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5271 The person that can pull it out is the next CEO. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5272 This next part of the interview is to determine leadership potential. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5273 I truly believed I wanted to win that parking space enough to pull it out. But it just wouldn't budge. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5274 Pull it out and you're the new CEO. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5275 Mr. Siegfried will be up shortly to take care of this. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5276 The VP that can pull it out is the next CEO. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5277 Woodward said, "The pen is mightier than the sword," one time too many. 1.1525 0.06758 59 54 1 4
5278 With our corporate name "Camelot," we have a challenge in finding the right CEO. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5279 that should cut our work in half 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5280 That's how he gave notice before he quit. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5281 Damocles has left the room...again 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5282 Next, I’ll show you where we do our round tables. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5283 Not your everyday tax wedge. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5284 Yeah, they always accept the challenge then opt for the golden parachute. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5285 Rumor has it that the trade negotiation meeting was not harmonious. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5286 I guess he cut work today 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5287 Perhaps Baron . . . 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5288 It is has been said that after the Brexit vote, he swiftly impaled his sword in the desk. Arthur then grabbed his coconuts and galloped out of building never to be seen again. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5289 Must have been a hostile takeover. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5290 Well, it's no Mjolnir. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5291 And if you can remove the sword, you will be given consideration for partnership. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5292 Whoever gets the sword out gets a gift certificate to Medieval Times 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5293 Trump has fired everyone who might try to free the sword. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5294 Are you worthy to run Excalibur Enterprises? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5295 Doesn’t this remind you of the game Which Thing Is Not Like The Others ? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5296 Do me a favor and go call Artie from the mail room. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5297 You Arthur. You are the one. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5298 My former wife likes to remind me that I am her 'EX'! 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5299 This could be MeToo! 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5300 And now for the final test to be CEO of King Arthur Flour. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5301 Remove it and you automatically become CEO. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5302 And this is William Wallace's office. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5303 Thanks for the offer, but really, I'm happy in the mail room. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5304 Let's have Myron give it a go. He has that gym membership. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5305 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is rightwise Regional Manager. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5306 I had a feeling he wasn't the one, true king. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5307 Wow. Excalibur! You've been given the opportunity to become King Arthur of the Corporate Board. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5308 At least they didn't give me the ax. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5309 The sword was magic, Merlin explained, and only one who was fit to be president could pull it from the stone. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5310 I know it's not a round table but we had short notice. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5311 He who pulleth yonder sword the one true vice president of sales be. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5312 The position is still open. We have yet to find the right candidate. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5313 The board thought I should have a succession plan. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5314 he constantly shows us our unworthiness 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5315 No one The king has left for vacation 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5316 It’s the latest idea for election reform. Whoever can pull the sword from the desk, gets to be president. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5317 It's enticing I just can't commit to a dragon duel until after my 4PM 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5318 This used to be Meghan's office 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5319 I'm afraid it's going to take some pull to get this office... 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5320 I hear the new CEO is from Camelot! 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5321 When you reach the C-suite, you get the One Ring. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5322 'I suppose the sword was mightier this time' 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5323 Do you know any crisis manager named Arthur? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5324 The last boss was a real backstabber. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5325 Whoever can take the sword out gets to be the new boss. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5326 This explains the new round table in the conference room. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5327 Wow, she sure made her point this time! 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5328 Who rules? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5329 ...and this is the office of our late founder, Mr. Damocles. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5330 Who soever pulleth the sword from my desk is fired. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5331 I mean do we really need mightier? 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5332 Guess that proves the sword IS mightier than the pen! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5333 Take it; the company's yours. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5334 So you want a raise? Well... 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5335 "The real question here is why is a flag with a kitschy springtime print flying out the window over at Yawkey Boothe Abernathy & Howe? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5336 Yank it if you want, but I don't like the long term numbers for this company. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5337 Arthur resigned. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5338 His anger management classes are taught by a viking.... 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5339 Guy 1: "Do you think that sword on the desk is the one he wanted us to get?" Guy 2: "I'm not sure? Possibly he said it shouldn't be too hard to find." Guy 1: "I'll give him a call just to make sure." Guy 2: "Good idea." 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5340 That looks like a heraldic reply to the latest Twitter storm 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5341 Trump keeps making it harder to find anyone with the caliber to fill these ambassador positions. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5342 Art, legend has it that he who draws the “Backstabber” sword is our rightful CEO. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5343 And this is the Excalibureau. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5344 Looks like Secretary Zinke will be visiting, today. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5345 He thought he was going to get the axe today. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5346 Obviously Joe has lost his edge. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5347 Whosoever pulleth that sword from that desk will become the new CEO. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5348 Excalibur Industries' succession planning meeting is about to begin 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5349 I think the messaging is abundantly clear -- but do you really think it will keep Bill in check? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5350 We give all of our interns one attempt. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5351 The art of the the steel. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5352 The next King will need to pull it out of the computer. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5353 A Masters in Business Analytics and I didn't get the job because I wasn't "worthy." 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5354 This final interview is gonna be a toughie. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5355 I told him to slash prices, not Price. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5356 The boss believes nothing gets negotiations going like a little sword play. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5357 It will take a real jerk to extract the blade and become the CEO. Hence , we are giving you first crack. But first, our lawyers want you to sign a waver holding us harmless if you might injure yourself. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5358 Sure you're ready for this Arthur? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5359 If thee is to pull thy sword from thy desk, thou shall be made CEO. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5360 It has been said that only the one true junior vice-president of HR has the power to wield it. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5361 Do you think our next CEO will be named Arthur? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5362 “It’s the modern version - Dame of the Desk”. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5363 Say hello to the boss 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5364 Yes, sir. Right away, Mr.Excalibur. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5365 It's the metaphor for Camelot Corporation's bottom line 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5366 Our next CEO will be the person who can pull this sword out and use it to trim labor costs. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5367 She's calling someone named Wart. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5368 This must be the new CEO succession plan. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5369 So whoever can pull the sword out from the desk becomes boss, right? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5370 It's my new letter opener, but I can't use it - it's stuck. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5371 ‘As I said, this is a temp job at minimum wage. But if you can get it out, the desk is yours.’ 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5372 The CEO said that the one that pulls it out leads next year's team building retreat. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5373 A chiropractor suggested it. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5374 It just easier to find the ideal candidate this way. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5375 Is that the new corporate mobile device? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5376 He says he dodged a bullet and refuses to come out! 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5377 Omerta or what? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5378 Hey boss I've got your coffe- 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5379 He who pulls the sword from the desk gets to be the boss. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5380 Here at Camelot Industries, we have a slightly different test for potential managers. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5381 Who so pulls out this sword from this desk becomes the true Assistant Vice President of Human Resources. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5382 I imagine this will appear on his résumé. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5383 Pull that thing out and you're the next CEO. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5384 Well, first of all, the feng-shui is completely destroyed. But worse, I cannot seem to get rid of all that treacle from Camelot from going around and around in my head. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5385 It is said that whoever pulls the sword from the desk gets one priority IT support call. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5386 Apparently, the pen is not mightier. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5387 Well, he WAS hired for the knight shift. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5388 The last person who tried was eaten by the advertising department. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5389 "R.S.V.P.?" John Curliano, Alameda, CA 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5390 I didn’t expect my job description to be so medieval. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5391 You can try but, I think this position is set in stone. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5392 Only the true CFO can release the sword. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5393 I'd give it a tug but my wife would never move to London. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5394 Arthur is always playing with us... 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5395 Not today. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5396 Rather that than slashing jobs. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5397 He tried it with a pen last week. The sword is mightier after all 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5398 See................. Definitely the right place. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5399 I swear I told him he could avoid the pain at his desk just by standing every so often. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5400 We ran out of staplers. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5401 If you can pull that sword out from the desk, you'll be crowned CEO. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5402 We all thought a paternity test would be quicker, but he insisted. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5403 They say that the one who can remove it gets dibs on the 12th floor conference room. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5404 Sometimes we need to simplify. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5405 Point made Arthur, but I believe you aren't getting the gist of the adage 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5406 Excalibur, you came back. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5407 Our search consultant said this was the best way to find the new CEO. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5408 This is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.... 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5409 Alrighty. Get up there, 'once and future' Craig. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5410 You wanted to see us Mr. Sword? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5411 It's not subtle, but at least management lets you know where you stand. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5412 I guess he took the hint 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5413 Arthur was a legend in hedge funds but couldn’t pull it off after Merlin became CEO. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5414 Noone has ever made partner. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5415 The designer of the desk claims it will promote both high caliber and Excalibur work. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5416 We await a new CEO. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5417 This might be a stab in the dark, but I'd say she resigned. 1.1525 0.06758 59 54 1 4
5418 Get the sword out of the desk and you are the boss 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5419 Corporate said who ever can pull it out gets to be the new manager 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5420 The last guy couldn’t cut it, so we had to let them go. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5421 That's an interesting looking pen. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5422 Legend has it that whoever pulls the sword from the desk, is destined to be "king of the corner office". 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5423 It’s the latest rage in succession planning. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5424 We use it for all kinds of cuts: staff, workload...... 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5425 He says to have your counter offer in by nightfall. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5426 Democles is here, Sir. You can come out now. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5427 Some guy called Merlin said the president has to pull the sword out out of the desk to validate his election. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5428 Morgan le Fay called Michael Avenatti 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5429 I’ve already tried. It’s not as easy as it looks. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5430 I guess cutthroat was really cutthroat. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5431 What's Latin for 'Freed from the mahogany?' 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5432 It doesn’t look good for the dividend. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5433 We haven't figured out how to free him from under the desk. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5434 Pull it out, and we can move to the round table in the boardroom. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5435 You’re wasting your time under there. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5436 Well, once again, 'the word' proved mightier. But we never expected the editor's desk to be the final resting place of the loser! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5437 Stop with the “fake news” accusations, the pen is just taking a little pause to regroup. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5438 Of course all swords will be plowed into individual shares, #MissedThatClass 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5439 It’s Office Depot’s newest desk, “The Sword in the Hon” 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5440 I think he's taking this King Arthur fable a bit far. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5441 The candidate who is able to withdraw the sword from the desk will get the position! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5442 I guess he left early! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5443 I knew we would find it on Arthur's table. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5444 So, this is the last part of your job interview. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5445 If you can pull that thing out, apparently you get a round table. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5446 He who can remove the sword gets five free terabytes on the cloud! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5447 Dave really wanted to prove the sword was mightier. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5448 They did say our new boss was cutting edge. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5449 ...And this is your office -- no pressure. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5450 You think that's scary? Wait till you see what they stuck in Mr. Weinstein's houseplants. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5451 Do you even WANT to pull it out? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5452 Well Mark, when your supervisor is a level 20 Conquest Paladin it's of the utmost importance that you have the expense reports on his desk by Monday. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5453 It is said that whoever pulls the sword from the desk is the One True CEO. Who will then use it to downsize our workforce by 30%. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5454 He couldn’t pull out so Stormy finished him off. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5455 Oh, oh, is this a new version of Jake's 'pull my finger' trick? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5456 Where's Arthur? We'll need him. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5457 “They say whoever pulls that sword out gets the office. I guess Arthur from accounting had this one locked up 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5458 As a kid, he used to scratch his name in school desks. I guess he graduated. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5459 But let's say you do it. You really want to be his chief of staff? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5460 This is where we last saw our boss, Arthur King. He's been missing since Thursday. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5461 Obviously, the board's vote was split. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5462 Maybe this isn’t a good time to ask. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5463 It's a shame he dropped his pen at just that moment. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5464 He's going to be hard act to follow. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5465 This couldn't be the return of King Arthur, his were knights of the round table. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5466 Only the impure of heart 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5467 This is our new hiring process; I'll leave you to it 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5468 Looks like Game of Thrones all over again! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5469 Whoever pulls it out becomes the next CEO. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5470 If you can do it, all in "Middle-Management" will be yours to rule. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5471 Draw the sword get the job. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5472 Yes, you'd be the new CEO, but you'd also be named first in all the indictments. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5473 It's a contest to become Secretary of Defense. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5474 If you can pull the sword from the desk, the job's yours. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5475 I'll bet Artie in accounting could do it. I hear he fences in his spare time. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5476 I guess he took a stab at it. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5477 Remove it, and you'll become the Once And Future Middle Manager. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5478 It would definitely put you on the fast track for a promotion. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5479 He who pulleth yonder sword shall rule the corporate empire. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5480 Qute simply, Arthur, pull Excalibur out, become CEO. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5481 Listen. Strange women sitting at a desk distributing swords is no basis for a system of hiring. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5482 I guess living by the sword is not working out.. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5483 Well, what do you know. All along I thought it had been stuck in a rock. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5484 Arthur doesn't work here any more. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5485 Smith is still fine-tuning his work-"live action role playing" life balance 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5486 Thus bespoke Excalibur 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5487 Where's Arthur? 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5488 The search committee got so tedious! 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5489 Sword, schmord ... I wield a mighty pen! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5490 I can’t find Arthur so it just has to stay there for now. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5491 The crookedness went over his head. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5492 We've been using it to slash costs. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5493 'It's hardly a throne but it's yours if you can pull it out." 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5494 Now, that’s a real ceo test 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5495 Yes,this is the one benefit of an education cut. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5496 The likelihood of us finding a Lancelot is higher than Trump giving up cheeseburgers. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5497 Who did this? It was that weird maintenance guy, Merlin. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5498 Security said he was ranting about his ex and some lady in a lake. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5499 They say whoever pulls it out is the next hedge fund manager. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5500 They've begun the competion for the new CEO 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5501 It's a metaphor, cut costs or else. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5502 A falling market is not an option for survival 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5503 Whoever pulls it out will be named CEO, and stockholders are expecting some immediate cuts. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5504 If you pull it out, all that you see will belong to thee. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5505 Oh don't worry about that, it's a reference. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5506 We better call office services. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5507 After our last 3 CEOs flamed out, the selection committee decided on more stringent standards. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5508 If you can pull it out, King Arthur's Corp is yours. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5509 So that's why I never reached "the desk of ...." 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5510 Whoever pulls it out will be king of the world. Trump says he's the only one who can do it. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5511 If you draw the sword HR will consider you for CEO. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5512 No offense to our Board of Directors, but this seemed the most promising gender-neutral CEO selection process. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5513 I heard he got stabbed in the back. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5514 Looks like the general finally resigned. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5515 The election system didn't sit well with our elderly voters, that's why we're taking a more "retro" approach. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5516 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise owner of this sweet corner office. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5517 They say anyone who can pull it out gets to help the CEO move. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5518 In case you get bored. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5519 The boss is going to be embarrassed when he realizes he forgot his sword at the office. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5520 Many men have tried but only the truly greedy succeed! 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5521 The search committee wants a warrior. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5522 How’s the new act coming Mr. Copperfield? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5523 Our former CEO was sartorially challenged... 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5524 Whoever can pull that gets to testify in front of Congress. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5525 The sword? A gift from some lady by the lake. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5526 Nobody has pulled this sword out in years, and no one has became the boss of the company in years. Get it now? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5527 Now we can open the Bifrost. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5528 I'd much prefer a test by pen. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5529 Pretty basic, Bob - I lured it with a bait of rainbow sprinkles and day old Fruit Loops. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5530 If you don't like it, try the golden handcuffs. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5531 You ever hear of the "Sword of Damocles"? Charles hadn't either before it did him in. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5532 Reviving "Camelot" won't make it all Harry and Meghan again, you know. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5533 Yep, it's the only way you can use your vacation time. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5534 I told you he's not here today. He went Lake fishing with his Lady. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5535 Boss said he was making a round table. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5536 If ye can pull “Exec-alibur” from the desk, then a corner office view shall ye have. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5537 Remember our motto, Arthur. The pen is mightier than the sword. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5538 If we pull the sword from the desk, does the lady if the lake come when you are the boss? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5539 If anything she looks more smug. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5540 Now that I finally got it, I find my life lacking something. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5541 This was Uther Pendragon's office. It's been vacant ever since he died. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5542 Whoever can get it out is the next regional manager. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5543 Is it your destiny to pull it out of the desk or mine 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5544 We're looking more for a King than a CEO. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5545 This isn’t so bad. You should have seen the place when he collected stamps. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5546 Whoso pulleth it out shall claim the office. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5547 The job entails a certain amount of responsibility. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5548 The selection committee is still deliberating. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5549 Turns out we were too big to impale. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5550 I hear the sword is the new ax. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5551 These executive job requirements have gotten out of hand. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5552 Say goodbye to the firm of Arthur, Merlin, and Caliburn. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5553 Sure, there are some location-specific quirks we had to work around, but this site had the cheapest rents in all of Camelot. Pay no attention to the sword, watch your knees on the stone. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5554 I think it adds character to the room, but you should have seen the looks I got on the subway bringing it here. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5555 For the sake of equal employment opportunity, whoever pulls that Excalibur gets the position. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5556 And finally, if you accept the job at this newspaper, don't believe that thing about the pen literally. 1.1525 0.06758 59 54 1 4
5557 If you can pull the sword out, you get a corner office. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5558 He got fired when he asked if his secretary to pull it out. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5559 What if I don't want to be CEO? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5560 That was always my fantasy job. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5561 And whosoever pulls out this sword... 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5562 He doesn't like books that come in over the transom. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5563 And whomever draws her free forthwith becomes ye Stupidvisor of Camicorp. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5564 Wanna get out of here? 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5565 And whosoever pulleth the sword from the desk shall be chairman of the board. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5566 Gee I wonder if his son will be able to remove it. They're getting more creative with their nepotism. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5567 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise executive born. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5568 Looks like Galahad quit 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5569 If you can pull this one out, the job is yours, Arthur. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5570 They say whoever removes it gets a key to the executive washroom... 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5571 Remove Excalibur and the job is yours! 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5572 Nah, you don’t have to pull it out to get the job. It is the latest in power desks, Arthur 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5573 It is written that the next CEO will be the one that can pull Excalibur from the desk. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5574 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is the rightwise Boeing Account Manager! 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5575 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise born inheritor of this prime office. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5576 I like to give the impression that I’m sharp and to the point. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5577 It's a self administered interview. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5578 Behold... Executive! 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5579 How ambitious do you feel today? 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5580 I wonder how many Excaliber jokes we'll get. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5581 Step forward, you might be our next prince. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5582 They say he’s a direct descendant. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5583 Technically that was part of his severance package. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5584 So this is your desk. Damn! I thought Dagger took everything when he left. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5585 Rumor has it a really shy sword swallower lives inside his desk. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5586 If you can draw it from the desk you become CEO. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5587 Maybe it should be a round desk. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5588 Hmm, I thought the Sword of Damocles was metaphorical. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5589 It's not your conventional succession planning, but the boss was a big fan of the romantics. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5590 Legend says that whomever pulls the sword from the desk will become the CEO. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5591 You just knew he wasn't the right guy to lead this corporation. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5592 Art's definitely going to be hard to replace! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5593 Remove it, young Steve, and take your rightful place in procurement! 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5594 It is a battle for the good office. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5595 So, Artie, in your resume you mentioned fencing in college. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5596 He who draws the sword gets five tickets to Hamilton. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5597 Looks like Mr Pendragon has jumped ship. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5598 He's hiding under the desk. I don't blame him. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5599 this was our solution to finding a CEO without utilizing a recruiting firm. Oh, and we have casual Fridays. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5600 Just don't look under the desk first or you may lose your nerve. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5601 OK Mr. Arthur... This is your final interview challenge. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5602 If we don't get a boss soon this place is going to get medieval. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5603 I was expecting a better severance package. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5604 He died trying. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5605 This is the Office of Roland! 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5606 Better get young Arthur in here... 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5607 The Mueller probe must be nearing its end. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5608 It's super easy to pull out, but nobody wants the promotion to middle management. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5609 The one who removes the sword wins the desk with a $50 coupon for Phil's Furniture Refinishing. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5610 HR wants us to pull together. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5611 Do you know anyone named Walt, per chance? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5612 There it is: deskalibur! 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5613 We decided on a more traditional method of selecting a new CEO. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5614 The legend says that whoever pulls out the sword gets the parking spot next to the EV charging station. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5615 The once and future boss. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5616 New guy. Takes everything literally. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5617 The cleaning crew never liked Jenkins either. Good luck in your new office. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5618 I heard if you pull it out you earn that chair over the trap door 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5619 Not many know it, but Arthur had quite the temper. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5620 Looks like someone killed his secretary 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5621 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise CEO born of all> (apologies to Thomas Mallory) 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5622 I liked it better when he just threw down the gauntlet. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5623 More like 'Sir Leaves-a-lot.' 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5624 Your resume only get you so far, Arthur. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5625 Remove the sword and you might get a corner office. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5626 Did you hear the latest? Damocles quit. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5627 So much for the pen! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5628 Then the judge issues a restraining order against me and warns me -- Oh look a cool sword! 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5629 Damned Damocles! I KNEW I was too happy. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5630 I’d rather be Lancelot than the next CEO 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5631 They did say this new desktop edition has more literal translations than last year’s. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5632 He mentioned something about receiving an offer he couldn't refuse. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5633 He was trying to make a point. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5634 Yeah, HR isn't happy about it, but Arthur insisted it be included in the succession plan. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5635 Who messed up my desk. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5636 This #metoo thing has forced HR to take some drastic measures. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5637 I guess we were right to be worried about a hostile takeover. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5638 the winner is the next cabinet member 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5639 "You go first. I'd rather be on the Board". 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5640 It happened the day Caliber's divorce was finalized. His 'ex' just stormed-in... and well, we haven't seen hide nor hair of the boss since. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5641 if you can yank that sucker free, legend has it you get to sexually harass anyone -- and i mean anyone -- with impunity. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5642 The President is out to take some fresh air. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5643 The next candidate for CEO is Kingston Arthur. I'm putting my money on him. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5644 You have to dial 9 first before you pull it out. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5645 They say whoever pulls the sword from the desk is declared the rightful boss. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5646 Next, we're gonna have one of our female executives try it. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5647 He always said, "Live by the sword, Die by the sword." --- I guess he's a man of his word. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5648 For a while there, Damocles was quite the rainmaker. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5649 Well, will you look at that. It is a singing sword. Guess I owe you a dollar. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5650 The way I remember it, the sword was supposed to be in the stone... 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5651 Now you know why we’re named The Excalibur Corporation. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5652 And is whoever removes it the next CEO? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5653 You get the corner office if you can pull the sword out. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5654 Who so ever pulleth this sword gets the corner office 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5655 He likes to think of himself as a legendary leader. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5656 Do you think we can get Duchess Meghan here? 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5657 He is damn serious about the deadline 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5658 Thanks, but no. I’ll stay in my Augean stable cubicle. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5659 If you can remove the sword, the job is yours. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5660 A very nice lady, who was soaking wet, told me that if I can get the sword out then I have a divine right to be CEO, share options and desk without a hole in it. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5661 F YOU CAN PULL THE SWORD OUT YOU GET TO BE CEO 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5662 I thought that Google chose its CEO in a different way. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5663 Made out of plywood. Very unstable. Killed itself. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5664 Whoever can pull it out gets to be Vice President of Mergers & Acquisitions 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5665 I don't think they liked our initial terms. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5666 Why can’t he just pick his successor? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5667 That's a strong goodby. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5668 I believe it speaks for itself. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5669 The new HR guy's name is Damocles 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5670 ...and we all thought he would put the hammer down. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5671 Like I said, we're looking for leaders. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5672 I think he's under there. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5673 The last acting CEO couldn’t get it out, either. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5674 And here is the final part of your job interview. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
5675 Legend has it that he, who pulls the sword shall become CEO of all the land. 1.1525 0.06310 59 53 3 3
5676 We had to let him go after the third try. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
5677 It was prophesied that the true head of accounting would be able to pull the sword from the commercial-grade laminate. 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
5678 He’s been like this ever since that weird corporate retreat. 1.1515 0.05395 66 58 6 2
5679 This is certainly more dramatic than the three envelopes... 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5680 In keeping with our theme, HR has streamlined the interview process. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5681 Ralph took one long, last look at the top day trader desk, before accepting Secretary of Treasury. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5682 It's nice, but I thought the desk would be more round. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5683 This may put a crimp in our search efforts. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5684 It’s an unconventional letter opener for sure, but the heart wants what the heart wants. 1.1500 0.04649 60 51 9 0
5685 We thought he was destined for greatness... 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5686 whosoever draws the sword from the desk shall receive 50,000 stock options 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5687 He said, if you think anyone else can do better, let 'em try. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5688 Looks like the sword he ordered on line finally came 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5689 So you think the pen is mightier than the sword, huh? We'll see about that... 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5690 Casual Fridays are getting out of hand. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5691 You ask a question at the end of a sales meeting, you get what’s comin’. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5692 I heard the desk on the next floor has a pen in it. 1.1500 0.04649 60 51 9 0
5693 After 30 years, a sword? 1.1500 0.04649 60 51 9 0
5694 Welcome to Sword in the Loan Financing, Arthur. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5695 Whosoever takes the sword from the desk, shall be the King of White Castle. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5696 Whoever pulls it out gets a "get out of jail free" card from the SEC. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5697 Sure, I could pull it out, but do I really want to be king of middle management? 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5698 Mr. Democles? Mr. Democles, are you here? 1.1500 0.06210 60 54 3 3
5699 Well he's sharper than the last boss. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5700 And here's the desk of our CEO, Mr. Gordon Knott. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5701 I expected a horse head , not Excalibur. They like me! 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5702 He who draws the sword from the desk is the One True CEO. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5703 As you can see, only the sharpest will make it through here. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5704 This office has been empty for 7 months. Apparently they’re looking for the perfect candidate. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5705 Looks like he left a message. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5706 Job's still open. Wanna apply? 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5707 ... and this is the pre-Camelot room. 1.1500 0.04649 60 51 9 0
5708 Where are my knights of the rectangular table ? 1.1500 0.04649 60 51 9 0
5709 That must have been quite a game of 5 Finger Fillet. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5710 Still no word on the pen’s whereabouts? 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5711 Clearly the new head-hunting firm has some retro ideas. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5712 We ran out of pens. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5713 According to legend, the one who pulls it out will make equity partner. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5714 Secretary from hell. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5715 A love of British folklore is his one redeeming quality. 1.1500 0.04649 60 51 9 0
5716 So, if you can pull that sucker out of there, the job is yours. 1.1500 0.06210 60 54 3 3
5717 He gave up already. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5718 Removing the sword is the most important part of your interview for the C-suite, Bill 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5719 Learned it in business school. The Genghis Kahn Maneuver puts a real exclamation point into a performance review. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5720 And then his body just crumbled away into dust. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
5721 Orange Propaganda won't even try. Rudy is looking for a place to hide it from that Crooked Lady and the whole world. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5722 Don't bother pulling it out. He was in the top desk drawer. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
5723 The creativity of the interviews nowadays is just mind-boggling! 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
5724 What d'ya say we call it a Knight! 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
5725 Many have tried, but taking Jenkins place is quite an ordeal. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
5726 Be wary of your overhead. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
5727 Whosoever shall pulleth the sword shall be king of accounts receivable. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
5728 ....and this is the executive suite. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
5729 Some guy from Music stuck that in Hund’s and he's not happy about it. They’re sending over Victor; they say he’s the only one who can pull it out. But I think there’s going to be trouble . . . Hund, Victor, and the sword. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
5730 He really is going to slash taxes. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
5731 I have doubts the sword will solve our leadership diversity problem after what happened with King Arthur. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
5732 Hiring a new CEO will not be easy. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
5733 Or we can skip the lengthy interview process right now 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
5734 His desk WAS his heart! 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
5735 We've added a new layer of cyber security. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
5736 It's a piece of cake. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
5737 Hatchet wasn't available? 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
5738 And the job is yours if you can pull the sword from the desk. 1.1452 0.05560 62 55 5 2
5739 The hard part is logging into the computer after you pull it out. 1.1452 0.04510 62 53 9 0
5740 What happened to resumes and interviews to select a new CEO? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5741 No, no, nothing like Excalibur. That's just where she always leaves here budgeting tools. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5742 A coup de grace for the sit down desk. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5743 Your first task is to defeat the dragon of Sales-Slump. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5744 Call Arthur Pendragon in Sales -see if he knows anything about this. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5745 We are a forward thinking company with an old fashioned hiring process 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5746 That's the problem with those new stone desks. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5747 This is what happens when King Arthur gets a desk job. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5748 Sorry about your desk; the last guy in this position was a real knightmare 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5749 It's been difficult finding the x-caliber of CEO that our business demands. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5750 It’s the boss’s new succession planning tool. He said he got the idea from some new leadership guru. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5751 He said he could pull it out better than anyone if the bone spurs hadn't migrated to his hands. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5752 Facilities management doesn't do metaphor, that's why it stays. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5753 Oddly enough his name is Arthur. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5754 Those big checks come in big envelopes. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5755 This is our meditate on poor decisions room. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5756 Looks like a lot of unwanted overtime to me. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5757 Mr. Arthur must be out to lunch. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5758 Endangered species? We didn't have that in my youth. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5759 I guess he was lying. His middle name wasn't Arthur after all. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5760 Oh no , we forgot the phone bill !!! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5761 "So this is what its like to be CEO of Excalibur Savings and Loan". 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5762 I guess this means no work on Monday. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5763 And he will die in a meeting only to return someday when the Company is nearly bankrupt. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5764 Brawn over brain. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5765 Arthur definately needs to get help. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5766 HR says it's the hot trend in succession management. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5767 We call it our equal-pay-for-women challenge. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5768 As you can see, this company has been without a leader for quite some time. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5769 Communication gap @ workplace - I just asked to arrange war room for project 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5770 It's as sound a strategy as any for picking his next communications director. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5771 The first person to remove the sword from the desk gets be his successor when he retires. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5772 Better have human resources call King Arthur again. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5773 He may have pushed the envelope a bit too far. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5774 He got tired of making cuts. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5775 Sword 1 Pen 0 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5776 if I can pull out that stone, I get to be CEO. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5777 According to corporate legend if someone with a billion dollars or more removes the sword they will become the new chairman of the board. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5778 Never thought I'd miss paper cuts. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5779 If you can retrieve Excaliber, the job is yours. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5780 The boss said whichever of us can pull the sword - gets the promotion. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5781 Don't tell Arthur. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5782 Check your job description, it's in there somewhere! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5783 Here at Camelot, Inc., the search process for a new C.E.O. is steeped in tradition. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5784 You pull it out, you get benefits 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5785 We're going to need a bigger pen. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5786 King Arthur just likes to tease us couch potatoes. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5787 While I was away from my desk the sword of Damocles finally fell! I feel such a sense of loss for all those years wasted waiting while it was hanging over me by a thread... 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5788 We find this more effective than the usual psychometric testing. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5789 We appreciate you taking the knight shift. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5790 He always asks for strengths and weaknesses. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5791 See! We can't even get a new manager because Arthur left his sword. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5792 Doesn't look like the next CEO will be a woman. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5793 We find this saves a lot of time reviewing resumes. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5794 The PENis is mightier than the sword XD 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5795 I guess they thought the sorting hat was too out spoken. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5796 Arthur just couldn't get it out. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5797 I told you Arthur hadn't cleared his desk. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5798 You know, the whole enterprise ended badly. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5799 Yeah, you get the throne, but you also take over the debt service. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5800 All this because he forgot his phone at home. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5801 Yeah, the board is kind of old school. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5802 Looks like the boss has finally agreed to bury the sword 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5803 It's the latest in executive search screening. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5804 Things have been handled a bit differently around here since Merlin was appointed to the board. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5805 Swallow this and you get your raise. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5806 I was aiming for her back. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5807 Whatever happened to "Write 3 letters"? 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5808 So whoever manages to pull it out gets the partnership. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5809 Arthur, look, but don't touch. It's a prop the NSA monitors. It slides out like a hot knife in butter. This how Trump has been getting his lawyers. Thanks, Merlin. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5810 Looks like Arthur’s the new CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5811 He was an Aurhurian. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5812 One more test, pull out the sword and you will be the rightful CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5813 Sure, whosoever wields the sword is the rightful CEO, but trying getting through airport security with that thing. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5814 Whoever pulls it out becomes Trump's new lawyer. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5815 I'd prefer a round table. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5816 He tried to hide, but I think they got him. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5817 Excalibur, protected by the second amendment! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5818 Give it a try - you'll could be the Junior Regional Strategic Risk & Compliance Analyst of lore. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5819 When Mr. Johnson gets like this, it’s best to stay away. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5820 We had a CEO, but this seems to be just as motivating. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5821 As I was saying, the board has come up with an old-school succession plan. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5822 I guess the Boss wants to see him. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5823 Upward mobility aside, this just seems barbaric. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5824 "He tried. He's not the one. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5825 I guess he's getting pretty serious about those cutbacks. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5826 Ok, let's see what he's made of; call The Donald. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5827 'We want someone who can help bring the team to a whole new level. Now, are you ready for the practical skills evaluation?' 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5828 It's our new pink slip. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5829 Trust me, that CEO is out there somewhere. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5830 Fine. If you're the rightful CEO, then go ahead and pull it out. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5831 My email said, "Cut to the quick"... 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5832 My guess is that he was trying to make his desk a coin bank, what do you think? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5833 You'd have to be a real magician to get this office. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5834 I personally prefer a Dungeons and Dragons themed office. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5835 The office was featured in a special pull-out section of Architectural Digest. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5836 Looks like Art's not here yet. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5837 Art must be out for lunch 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5838 Legend has it that the person who can type gun the right computer password becomes CEO. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5839 There goes another ex-collaborator. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5840 if you can get it out, we’ll replace your desk with a round one. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5841 You get that out, and you’ll get the job. And a Crown Vic. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5842 It's going to take a lot of pull to get that desk job! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5843 If you can pull it from the desk they make you CEO. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5844 Whosoever pulls this sword from this desk shall be CEO. With stock options. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5845 At least they didn´t give him the axe 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5846 He wanted a round table but settled for this. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5847 We don't need a glass ceiling at this company. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5848 This new line of King Arthur desks sure is the cutting edge. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5849 Whoso pulleth out this sword from the desk will win a round table! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5850 Well, Arthur, here's your chance to become real estate royalty. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5851 Where’s Damocles? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5852 There was no will. Whoever pulls it out becomes CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5853 Unfortunately, his executive caliber was never a good fit with our culture. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5854 Last part of your interview - pull on this to see if you will be president. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5855 Legend has it that whoever pulls the sword from the desk will be the next head of accounting. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5856 Removeth the sword and you shall lay claim to the corner office. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5857 We haven't been able to get it out since Artie was fired. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5858 Legend says whoever pulls Excelibur from the desk shall become the new accounting manager . . . Until then we're going by seniority. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5859 Again, what goes around, comes around! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5860 The secretaries have a pool going to see who can pull it out. But the board feels it's time to look outside the firm. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5861 Now, pull that out and then all of this can be yours. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5862 Do you want to take another stab, at doing the progress reports? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5863 You may have to work knights. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5864 No one has been able to remove so we decided no one would be in charge. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5865 He couldn't have quit at a better time. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5866 We've got two choices: (a) take a shot at ruling Britain or (b) slowly back out of the room. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5867 The new CEO will have his hands full 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5868 Now, what is Lancelot trying to prove? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5869 Congratulations on passing the first five case studies. We think you would be a great fit! There's just one final test, and the job is yours... 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5870 ... and the one who pulls it out shall be named CEO. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5871 Just as we thought. No one's leadingBlu2lili the kingdom. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5872 Where's Stone? 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5873 Recruiting for our next CEO has not gone well. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5874 I knew I shouldn't have skipped arm day. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5875 Legend says that whoever can pull out the sword will become our next overvalued and extremely overpaid CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5876 Sheesh! I thought you were supposed to fall ON the sword! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5877 You better call Arthur! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5878 See Rick, this is what happens when you hire the budget option staffing firm. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5879 Jeez, Merlin! You couldn't've just put it in a stone? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5880 Pull the sword and you'll get your choice of available corner offices 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5881 When Arthur took early retirement last week, he said that we'd have a difficult time finding his replacement. Do you want to give it a try? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5882 Whoso pulleth out this sword can access the Holy Email 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5883 The boss said this task may be a tough one. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5884 Video Interview - asking about applicant’s greatest weakness! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5885 Wasn't this Thomas Malory's office? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5886 It's the new Desk Decor for authoritarians. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5887 It gives the same message as a pink slip, but it's more eco-friendly. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5888 And we thought he was a higher excalibur person. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5889 Go get that kid Arthur in he mail room. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5890 Seems like performance reviews keep getting further and further away from the actual job duties. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5891 Whoever pulls it out is our next CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5892 And this is our C-Level Excalibur. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5893 King Arthur never had to deal with robocalls. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5894 Merlin will be the Secretary of State 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5895 And this is where we meet with the CFO to do the annual budget review. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5896 Whoever tried to kill him had bad aim and didn’t make a mess. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5897 He who pulleth out this sword from this stone, shall by bloodright be assistant manager of all H.R. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5898 He did encourage junior people to take a stab at leadership. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5899 Legend has it that the one who can remove the sword from the desk will be the next CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5900 Your not going to believe it when you look under that desk 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5901 Whoever pulls out the sword will become our next CEO. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5902 I wonder if that’s a Flying Dragon or Galactic Shogun? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5903 ‘Hmmm. We might need to lower our expectations.’ 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5904 First, the ax in the wall... now this. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5905 Pull out the sword. Then, we set you on a real task: deciding on an insurance provider. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5906 One last interview to see if you fit in here. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5907 The note said "Lotsa luck finding my replacement, suckers!" 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5908 Only he that draws the sword is the rightful next Deputy Director of Payroll and Legal. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5909 It's a better method than the electoral college 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5910 We decided this was the fairest way to choose the next CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5911 Our old CEO had some pretty archaic ideas about succession planning. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5912 Alright Jeff, pull out the sword and the job's yours. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5913 We think she's under the desk, but no one has the strength to find out 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5914 '...after which, the applicant travels to Nemea...' 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5915 Don Draper could do it. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5916 Well, this answers the question of how the next CEO will be selected........... 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5917 You can tell that he’s the true king because he’s already in lunch 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5918 1. He said he wanted to think out of the box. 2. Call the Magic Castle, quick. 3. We think it is Schrodinger's cat. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5919 If you can draw the sword from the desk without roiling the markets, the job is yours. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5920 No, then it would be just stone. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5921 He hopes it will help him rule the world. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5922 Rumor is that the boss did this many years ago when challenged by the board. Whoever pulls it out is CEO. He keeps the electronic remote to unlock it in his pocket. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5923 Looks like Microsoft Excelibur has been installed. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5924 I hope that new guy Lance can work around the sword. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5925 Historically, this hasn't worked out so well. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5926 It’s a new take on the job interview. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5927 I told him that he would get hacked if he left his computer on. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5928 The CEO left in such a hurry he forgot his sword. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5929 There is an email going around that if you can pull it out you get to be CEO. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5930 . . . and this is your office, Arthur, if you choose to accept it. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5931 He thought he was King Arthur but he ended up being more like Lancelot 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5932 Wow, that's weird. Use the force, Luke. Maybe you can get get it to move. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5933 Well, I guess Art wasn't up to the task after all. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5934 I'm glad he left amicably. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5935 I guess he got the point! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5936 Don't feel bad; so far we haven't found that attribute on any candidate's resumé. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5937 He who removes the sword becomes associate regional vice-president. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5938 It's tough to get a promotion around here. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5939 I told you that contracting a British firm for our executive recruitment was a bad idea. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5940 I will be right back 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5941 I see the new audit position still hasn’t been filled 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5942 He was always such a straight shooter. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5943 The boss doesn't mind, so long as I keep it in my desk. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5944 Just wiggle it from left to right 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5945 They say Art has high ambitions. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5946 Hey Siegfried, your grandfather was here! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5947 So this is the interview? He does this sometimes. Used to be in summer theatre, you know. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5948 Looks like the corporate raiders got here first. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5949 It has cut our HR budget in half and simplified our hiring process. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5950 Bud's at it again... He ran out of the office yelling "Dilly Dilly" 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5951 Apparently Arthur had to be escorted out after management settled on square tables. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5952 He slices the hero sandwiches at his desk most days... 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5953 Arthur's on a date. He swiped to the right. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5954 Promotions are based on the Arthurian model. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5955 We've simplified the job search. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5956 Sometimes in contract negotiations the sword is mightier than the pen. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5957 It's a clever recruiting tool, but it lacks a certain mythological authenticity. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5958 Sword of Damocles fell down while I was not in my office. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5959 Not sure how that happened, sir! I'll make sure your laptop gets closed next time. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5960 The review process is pretty straightforward around here. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5961 Perhaps we should come back after Trump leaves the White House. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5962 whoever can pull it out is the next CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5963 Let me guess. A subtle no-confidence message? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5964 Artie quit. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5965 Bite me. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5966 Legend has it whoever pulls it out gets a pension. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5967 Yeah, we got this recruitment consultant called Merlin. He says aptitude tests are the way to go. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5968 Huge Game of Thrones fan. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5969 There’s a rumor that Art is stoned under the desk. Are you bold enough to check, Lance? 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5970 OK. Good start. Give the desk a stone finish. Etch "Excalibur" on the toy sword, and we'll get Mr. Trump in for the photo shoot, just before the summit. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5971 They say only the real CEO can remove Descaliber. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5972 Must have been a heck of an envelope... 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5973 For whosoevereth shall pull this sword from this desk shall become CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5974 And that's how you become Knight of Direct Customer Sales for the North-East. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5975 He had a point about taking the day off. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5976 Call Arthur in here 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5977 Finally, a clear path to promotion! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5978 Remove Excalibur from this desk and get a roundtable in your conference room. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5979 Our Board has high expectations for the next C.E.O. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5980 I don't even remember setting a password. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5981 Hold my coffee. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5982 I mean... it's only VICE President of the International Sales Analytics Division 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5983 That was an executive decision 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5984 Hmm . . . Excalibur or Damocles? 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5985 Art better get on with this Excalibur hype. The stockholders want returns on the Holy Grail account while the peasants are still buying it! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5986 Human Resources had to let Art go. He was convinced he was on a mission from God. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5987 The true CEO would know to pull the sword out before he sat down. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
5988 So Nate, the promotion is yours, all you have to do is pull the sword from the desk...and agree to change your name to Arthur. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5989 Word to the wise: the boss is really tired of hearing the erroneous reference to "knights of the rectangular table". 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5990 Is the pen mightier than the sword? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5991 Looks like we're getting a successor the old fashioned way.... Well, the CEO's wife caught him cheating and let's just say she removed more than his gallstones. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5992 Our CEOs are self-selecting. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
5993 She must be doing yoga. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5994 Charlie, don't you think it be more direct and less painful to just hand in your resignation? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5995 I don't know, just heard a lot of grunting and something about that F#%@ing Merlin and he stormed out. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5996 We've gone back to basics in our executive search. You pull out the sword. You're our new CEO. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
5997 Has anyone asked Arthur in Accounting? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5998 I think it has something to do with Southern Cal's victory over Notre Dame in last Saturday"s football game. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
5999 Well, they did say they were going to slash some positions. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6000 If you can pull it out, you’ve got the job Arthur. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6001 You’re fired! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6002 I certainly hope that it wasn't meant for me! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6003 Well, Arthur ... 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6004 I took a stab at succession planning 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6005 This position has been vacant since the days of Kennedy administration. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6006 If you can pull out the sword, you become CEO. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6007 I've heard the saying, 'Live by the sword, die by the sword,' but it this case, I'd have thought it would be a pink slip. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6008 Our CEO of THE SWORD AND THE STONER is rarely present.... 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6009 This is the strangest job interview ever, but I can pull it off. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6010 We lose more swords that way... 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6011 OK...so now I undertand why Arty was so adamant about the new round conference table! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6012 No Arthur, not a CEO opportunity. It's standard issue for all new Execs. Think "arming teachers in classrooms". 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6013 Only the true CEO can pull that out 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6014 Since it’s your first day, let’s see if you’re corner office material. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6015 We're still waiting for him to come back. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6016 Yeah, I called I.T. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6017 Whoso pulleth this sword from this desk of wood is destined for middle management. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6018 Not surprised. My callback was a troll under the desk. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6019 We call him 'The Closer'. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6020 Is this his new motivational exercise? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6021 They weren't kidding when they said Wall Street was cutthroat. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6022 There’s just one last step in the application process to see if you are the true head of Human Resources. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6023 Look, I didn't write the charter, so just give it a pull and maybe I'll be reporting to you from now on. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6024 The new person may not be the same caliber as the ex-employee. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6025 Well, I guess Mr. Damocles hasn't returned from lunch. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6026 I think I'll get those TPS reports finished by the deadline. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6027 Arthur, this does not make you a legend in insurance sales. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6028 He who can withdraw the sword will become CEO! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6029 He who really did pulleth out this sword from this desk, was right wise Donald, Born Of All America. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6030 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is right wise in violation of our no weapons policy. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6031 Actually, pulling the sword from the stone desk isn’t the hardest part of the interview process. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6032 Whoever can take it out of the desk gets to be CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6033 Now all we need is a pauper of royal blood to draw from the desk "Executive." 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6034 It's rightful owner is the Once and Future CEO 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6035 That's a relief. When he became CEO it was pistols at dawn. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6036 Who so ever can draw this sword will be rightwise king of Wall Street. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6037 It's either the inaccurate sword of Damocles or an Excalibur knock-off. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6038 Now for the last part of your interview. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6039 I know it's a unconventional way to choose a C.E.O, but here at Pendragon industries we value tradition. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6040 Don't you think they'd look better if they didn't cut off their horns? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6041 You did great on your three interviews. Now there’s one more thing to do to get the job. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6042 I thought he said he wanted his successor to have caliber. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6043 It's HR's new employee evaluation. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6044 They say King Arthur’s sword lies on the bed rock of a mountain; a mountain of work! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6045 This goes to show how old weapons need more action. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6046 I couldn't find my iPad stylus so I went with plan B. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6047 The last one didn't work out. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6048 Do we call HR or Merlin?? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6049 It probably wouldn't come out, but why take a chance? 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6050 He said he'll be back at work once we can get it out. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6051 Legend has it that no sexual harassment complaints will be filed until a worthy HR rep comes along and pulls the sword out of the desk 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6052 For God's sake Plummet, don't look under the desk. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6053 I think it's biblical and I think we better get the hell out of here. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6054 Apparently falling on it was not an option . . . 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6055 But will you know what to do with it once you've pulled it out? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6056 CFO to whoever can pull it out. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6057 They say whoever pulls it out will be the King of all Wall Street. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6058 If you give me a chance I know I can pull the sword out. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6059 It's not the ideal way to hire a CEO, but since the watery tart quit it's what we're going with. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6060 I thought this was supposed to be a round table. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6061 Jiggle the router when the WiFi's down and the handle if you can't take it anymore. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6062 And here's your office, Arthur... 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6063 Pull it out of the desk and you'll be the King of Wall Street 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6064 This is part of the reason Lehman Brothers failed 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6065 I heard it's a fake to get someone to take Stevenson's old job. Bet you can lift that thing right out. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6066 This is where we sever problem employees. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6067 I wish he fancied himself Sir Workelot instead. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6068 Belonged to our samurai embezzler. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6069 That means she's out-of-office. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6070 A simpler way to find the right candidate than the interminable interviews. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6071 We're still waiting for him to finish his latest email. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6072 'This office connects to the Round Table Conference Room' 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6073 HR has concerns about gender bias, so we'll replace it with a disgustingly big bonus check. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6074 I guess the boss's pen was NOT mightier, after all. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6075 If you pull it out, they'll give you an orange jumpsuit and immunity. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6076 Pretty sure he was the last one. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6077 Using a button to lock the door is passive aggressive. I find this to be much more direct 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6078 So this is how you get a private office. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6079 No, I definitely said we needed a board of some caliber at the table. Your consultant contract for my new start-up is terminated. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6080 Now this is a hostile takeover. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6081 We've found it increases worker productivity. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6082 Looks like another round of staff cuts is coming. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6083 “Despite the Karmic debt I incurred, my granddaughter was thrilled”. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6084 He's the most hands-off boss I've ever had. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6085 Go ahead, Arthur. It's yours to secure. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6086 This is how we choose our next CEO 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6087 Only he who pulls the sword gets full dental coverage 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6088 He speaks to me... 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6089 They say he who lifts Excalibur will have the power of the corner office. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6090 It awaits the once and future Vice Dean of Accounts Payable. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6091 You weren't lying about the spartan decor. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6092 I.T. calls this Arthurian password protection. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6093 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise Regional Manager of all New England. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6094 Arthur, if you remove this sword from the desk, you will be promoted to the assistant manager position. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6095 It's a succession planning process that has given us a lot of good results over the years. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6096 HR might have a challenge filling this position. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6097 Mental note- never sleep under my desk. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6098 Arthur has some explaining to do 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6099 He just rushed out when he found out the Secretary Of State job was open again. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6100 I think Mr. Zorro just went to the restroom! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6101 He likes to be prepared for battle every morning. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6102 We use Jenkins on deals that might turn hostile. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6103 That's the Singing Sword. Mike used it, coped a plea, turned state's, and got 90 days. The CEO is doing 10 years 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6104 He resisted the hostile takeover ‘til the end! 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6105 This is our succession plan? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6106 New HR Policy 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6107 I hope that for your sake, you have good life insurance. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6108 When Arthur Schwartz became VP, it was only the start 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6109 I Told Him To Get The Round Table, Geesh 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6110 I'm not going to pull it out. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6111 Don't make the sword angry. Do you SEE where it's pointed? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6112 One CEO candidate could pull it out. She just didn't fit the company culture. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6113 We've gained a reputation for creating truly legendary methods of identifying talent. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6114 This is the last and final stage of your job interview. “ You will have 30 seconds to remove sword. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6115 Before we start the interview, let’s see if you can pull it out. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6116 Hence the name "Rudy's Knights of the Rectangular Desk LLC" 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6117 Three weeks additional P.T.O. if you can pull the sword out. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6118 Too bad...I thought the last interviewee was promising. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6119 Maybe take a break from Westworld, man. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6120 Unfortunately, he just couldn't cut it. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6121 As you can see, we have had trouble finding a qualified candidate for the position. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6122 My sales numbers alone should be enough for the promotion. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6123 Is Arthur around? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6124 I'm starting to think the coming of the one true bureaucrat is just a myth. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6125 If you pull it out you get to be U.S. Attorney General. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6126 It’s got nothing to do with the sword. It’s skill at deleting email that determines the next CEO. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6127 Looks like we've been raided. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6128 I'm on the fence about you taking this job, Arthur. Perhaps you can pull it off. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6129 Arthur is e-commuting from Tintagel this week. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6130 Damn that Dave Damocles. He's never in when you need him. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6131 Well, his last name is Excalibur 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6132 'His rise to the top wasn't a Cinderella story after all." 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6133 On eBay 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6134 Competition’s positively medieval here since adopting this British HR service. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6135 He thinks he is the modern day Arthur from The Sword in the Stone. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6136 I thereby prove myself to be the rightful mid-level manager, but it is just a release latch under the desk. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6137 We've simplified our job interviews. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6138 In our corporate culture backstabbing is a thing of the past. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6139 Go see Damoclese in HR. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6140 I've just ordered a round table for the boardroom, and Lance is checking out new HQ space in Camelot. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6141 I know it's a legendary way for picking a leader - but are we really going with Merlin's idea? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6142 I told you Arthur was irreplaceable, but now you went and fired him! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6143 This sword's for you. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6144 When he retired he said something about 'forging ahead'. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6145 I don't want to be chairman you pull it out. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6146 Whomever succeeds in pulling it out, gets to sell it on eBay. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6147 And here's the project he left to Eric. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6148 I know you think you're 'bound for greatness', Mr. President, but according to the Grand Wizard, this is the real test... 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6149 Mumblety-peg on steroids. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6150 This is our Excalibur corner office challenge. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6151 Usually I just get a pink slip... 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6152 Pull it out of the desk and all this is yours. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6153 Give it a try--but be wary--it is a 2-edged sword. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6154 Our last CEO's succession planning left much to be desired. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6155 The way things are going Human Resources will never fill this position. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6156 Someone's been Ambien tweeting. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6157 Knights of the Rectangular Desk 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6158 He just killed it every time. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6159 Artie mumbled something about red being his favorite color and POOF he was gone! 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6160 It does make a fine point. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6161 Your won the wager. It appears the sword was mightier. Let's celebrate. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6162 It looks like Arthur isn't here yet. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6163 But every time someone pulls it out, the original owner appears in full plate armor, grabs the sword, slices their head off, and says, "Over my dead body!" 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6164 He never knew what to do with put options. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6165 Remove the sword and you are the new CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6166 Madoff left it for his successor. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6167 Oh my God, he's finally off to the crusades. Do you know if his wife knows? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6168 Quick, Russia! Help me pull this sword out so I'll get to sit in the Oval Office! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6169 Care to try your luck? I nearly blew a disc trying to pull it out. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6170 The interview? Nah, this is how we choose our CEO 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6171 Let's excalibrate. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6172 Arthur, if you can pull the sword out of the desk, you can be CEO. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6173 Whoever pulls it will parameterize disruption of our leveraged synergies 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6174 No king-maker here. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6175 Unfortunately, my management experience only includes scimitars. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6176 Whosoever draweth this sword from this desk shall be the king, true born, of the land. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6177 There must be a better way to decide who gets a promotion around here. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6178 I thought I heard a piercing cry. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6179 Behold... the once and future Second Assistant Deputy Vice President. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6180 It's the dirk in the desk. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6181 Just don't turn around. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6182 Call Corporate. I’ll go find Arthur. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6183 One guy who used to work here would take naps under the desk, so the boss had an idea 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6184 Frankly, its less irritating than an automated out of office reply. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6185 Hey boss, am I in trouble? 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6186 And here is the interview room 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6187 Remember in the job description when we said, “LARPing is a plus”? 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6188 Was there a message? 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6189 Legend has it that only he who earns 500 times the median employee salary can pull the sword from the desk. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6190 Does the prophecy say anything about fixing our macho culture? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6191 This is Arthur King's office. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6192 The Board decided to go in a different direction to find our new CEO 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6193 I think if you can pull it out, you get an extra week of vacation. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6194 And there's free Wifi if you can remove it... 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6195 Someday, I suppose. In the meantime the workers comp costs are killing us. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6196 Pulling it out's the easy part. But how could we possibly fit the Round Table in here? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6197 Some political stunts have better optics than others. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6198 Finally, a raise. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6199 We've changed our interview process. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6200 And that desktop is pure marble. You tell me. . . 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6201 Whosoever pulleth this from its place shall rightwise become CEO. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6202 There is a sword in that desk. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6203 He certainly knows how two challenge a subordinate. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6204 I asked for a round desk, but they gave me this instead. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6205 Whoso pulleth out this sword shall rightwise be declared king of the minions. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6206 We only hire those who crawl under the desk with a toolbox before pulling on it. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6207 He has no qualifications for the job, but I hear Art has the inside track. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6208 We're hoping to eliminate false positives. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6209 It’s said the one who can remove it should offer the Congressional testimony. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6210 I guess Kevin didn't make partner after all. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6211 Now that you mention it, Hurley's office does seem a bit spartan. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6212 There's one more test after this - pulling a staple with your fingernails. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6213 This was the office of the CEO of a place called ENDRON. The meaning and significance have been lost through the mists of time. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6214 Remind me to expand the applicant drug screening protocol to cover steroids. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6215 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise the Assistant Regional Manager of Marketing 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6216 Bit of an odd paper weight. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6217 Whoever pulls it out gets the corner office.... 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6218 They told us to move fast and break things. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6219 They're considering Arthur from the third floor for the position, but I don't think he can pull it off. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6220 He said it was low tech. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6221 No one wants this desk because of the sword stuck in it. Well, I'll see you later, Eugene. I have to take my cat to the veterinarian. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6222 Oak. Not stone. Why, Arthur? 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6223 I think it's a 'Do Not Disturb' warning. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6224 I would think Arthur could handle this in his sleep. 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6225 And now, for the final step of onboarding... 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6226 Our corner office looks for something more than just an MBA. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6227 And below the hilt, in letters of gold: “Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is rightwise Chief Executive Officer. Though many tried for the sword with all their strength, none could move the sword. “ So this is why we lack strong leadership! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6228 The previous incumbent worked at this for six months. If you think you can pull this off, have at it... 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6229 We’ve been waiting for a true-born CEO for days. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6230 We've tried everything else in our search for a chief who can save the company. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6231 Not in the back! 1.1429 0.04718 56 48 8 0
6232 No golden parachute, but whomever gets a chain mail suit. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6233 This is our King Arthur desk. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6234 Merlin and Arthur left for an early lunch, so sure, you can try to pull it out. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6235 Annual reviews here are pass-fail. Well, so far, only fail. 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6236 It’s Excalibur, better call King Arthur! 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
6237 No-one's been able to pull it out. That's why we came up with the Electoral College system. 1.1429 0.06945 56 52 0 4
6238 According to legend, no one can remove the sword from the petrified wood but an executive born to slash jobs and wages. 1.1429 0.06461 56 51 2 3
6239 #metoo? 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6240 The Re-org was a close for comfort! 1.1429 0.05937 56 50 4 2
6241 Someone call King Arthur... 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6242 He must be part of the knight crew. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6243 We've had a hard time finding a new CEO. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6244 Looks like this is your desk, Arthur. or, Well, the company is called "Excalibur". 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6245 He said something about going off to become a knight... 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6246 The last person to hold this position did not have caliber. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6247 Management wants us to disrupt the old paradigm of pens being the mightiest. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6248 He must be looking for a successor. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6249 His pen was even mightier. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6250 Well, it beats a knife in the back. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6251 IT is having a hard time with the password. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6252 Remove the sword and you’ve made partner! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6253 We're using a head-hunter to help fill the position. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6254 Our interview process is pretty straightforward. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6255 I told you the Game of Thrones theme for the office party was a mistake. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6256 It’s what passes for a kingdom these days, and includes Accounts Receivable. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6257 Your next project assignment is not set in stone, Art, but I think you get the idea. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6258 The job includes meaningful work that can be done in eight hours a day, six weeks' paid leave, a corner office, and health insurance that includes dental. There is only one condition. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6259 This is how we cut upper management costs 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6260 Pull it out Arthur, I double dare you! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6261 Our leader fancies letter openers. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6262 H e always must make a sharp final statement. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6263 The new MacBook Sword looks so much cooler than the older version. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6264 Oh the Starks we’re here. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6265 The ultimate spam preventer! 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6266 HR will definitely go medieval on us if they hear about this. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6267 Where is Guinevere when you need her. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6268 Live by the sword, work by the sword 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6269 I guess the bipartisan approach was rejected. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6270 Now that the sword has fallen, will Damocles return to his desk? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6271 Well Arthur, this is the creation myth of the firm. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6272 It won't budge. Call King Arthur in accounting. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6273 Big policy shift, if the pen is not mightier than the sword. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6274 I really should start reading those “team building” emails more closely. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6275 The ex was not our caliber. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6276 Arthur left behind legendary shoes to fill. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6277 He was aWagnerian to the last. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6278 Well, they've certainly set a high standard to get this promotion. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6279 They call it ex- officio - calibur. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6280 From auditing to the presidency, just pull the sword! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6281 Just one more trivial HR task, and you're all set. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6282 Do you have any idea what's under the desk? 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6283 Just a reminder, Thompson: if it's not cutting edge, cut it out 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6284 And in here we have the succession plan he left us. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6285 Pass the paternity test, and the job is yours. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6286 Is that the Nextcalibur? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6287 I count 75 drawn lines here; do I deduct that from the 250 allowed characters? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6288 Pull it out and you're hired. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6289 The London office suggested this to the search committee. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6290 In his performance review, Jones mentioned he would stop cutting corners. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6291 Guess I should cancel his lunch order! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6292 Fortunately, Mr. Damocles left the building before this happened. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6293 Am I right, Arthur?.....Arthur...are you there? 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6294 And this, Arthur, could be your office. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6295 I told him he should have gone with the oak instead. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6296 If I had known this is how I get a promotion, I would have kept my gym membership. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6297 The one who removeth the sword shall be CEO 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6298 Our new CEO screening test. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6299 Oh, so he just HAD to call in today. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6300 Only if he can find the desk password. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6301 I guess the buck really does stop here! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6302 We kept warning him not to text and juggle. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6303 Looks like it's time for an outside hire. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6304 That's one way to make budget cuts 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6305 Do you think our HR process is a little dated? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6306 It’s caused me to question the safety of hiding under desks! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6307 Guinevere stopped by and he was gone! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6308 Evidently, his back-stabbing was fruitless. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6309 He's been diagnosed with a split personality. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6310 The windows won't open either. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6311 Mr. Pendragon, welcome to Excaliburton. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6312 Yes, your predecessor left that there for you. Best of luck. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6313 Want a promotion? Remove the sword. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6314 They say that whoever pulls the sword from the desk will never have to do a trust fall again. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6315 Simpson, for the last time, tell your ex this is not your office! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6316 Unfortunately, he happened to be sitting on his desk at the time. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6317 He led by intimidation. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6318 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise King of Middle Management. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6319 The sword from the stone is easy. That's an ironwood desk, and that stuff really grips. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6320 Dan: Remind me one more time, Dick, why you bet your corner office, that you could sell more life insurance policies than Ronny’s evil sword? Dick: Because of cocaine, Dan. Because of cocaine. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6321 Maybe he is at the round table? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6322 Whoever removes it will earn hundreds of times the salary of the average employee. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6323 Not exactly what I had in mind when I asked for a wizard CFO. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6324 Must be the art consultant’s new desk. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6325 Our writer fled. This time, the sword was mightier. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6326 Someday someone worthy will yanketh that sword from that desk and receive a raise that keeps up with inflation. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6327 I'll call HR - it is time the company terminates Art. This display of his royalty complex is beyond a quirky obsession. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6328 This job requires a special kind of magic 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6329 It says, "Whosoever pulleth this sword from this desk shall become the rightful Chairman of Viacom." 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6330 Either we need to speak to the cleaning crew, or the Cosmic Goddess is sending us a message. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6331 The final interview step. Pull it out. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6332 It's the only way to get a retirement pension with this company. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6333 The last guy use to cut himself every time he answered the phone. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6334 Obama couldn't pull it out. Vegas money is on Trump. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6335 Bagged it in Narnia 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6336 No thank you. I can't stand round tables. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6337 Coming from Sisyphus LTD, we think you'll find executive advancement much more obtainable at At Excalibur Industries. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6338 I must say, you have quite the ex, Cal. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6339 They're calling it a White Collar Macbeth. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6340 Unlike most New Yorkers, we don't stick it in, we pull it out. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6341 Funny, I never noticed his desk is stone. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6342 I'd hate to lose a man of your calibur. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6343 You think that's big, wait until you see the size of the envelopes! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6344 That is a very straight line you are taking there Sir 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6345 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise executive born, pending satisfactory references and a criminal record check. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6346 So I'm having trouble with tax cuts... 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6347 This is how you fill the accounts receivable position? 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6348 They say if you pull the sword from the desk, you get a golden parachute. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6349 "He said "He who possesseth the power to withdraw the sword may use the executive throne". 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6350 Whoever can pull it out gets that severance package. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6351 We got it wholesale at auction. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6352 I don’t know Arthur. Go ahead and give it a try! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6353 He told me to desk the sword. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6354 After the 2017 election, we revamped our interview process. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6355 There was also an app for that but Mr.Thethird wanted to keep the ritual. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6356 Boss is going to be upset and the worst is Arthur is on vacation. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6357 It wasn't easy. I had to beat out Donald Jr. to get it! 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6358 We're just waiting for the new CEO to arrive. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6359 Doesn't look good for the Excalibur deal, does it? 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6360 Legend has it that whoever can pull out the sword will become assistant vice-president of human resources. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6361 I missed 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6362 The boss asked for a granite top. I would have gone for quartz. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6363 We had to ditch the lady in the lake. HR says “downsizing” but I got wind of a harassment suit coming. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6364 Let’s just say, our expectations are legendary. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6365 If you can pull it out, you're our new CEO 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6366 And here's the Head Moyel's office. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6367 A gentle touch, and you'll become business executive. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6368 I guess no one could snatch the pebble from his hand. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6369 At least he hasn't given us the axe 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6370 He definitely was a crusader. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6371 He who pulls out the sword shall be the new office party coordinator. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6372 They said it should increase productivity. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6373 The old guy used to be good but now he's ex-caliber. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6374 HR wanted a stronger screening process. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6375 He's always said that a man of sword is better than a man of words. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
6376 Behold the desk of Uther Pendragon. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6377 It helps me get my point across. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6378 I bet Trump is in the bathroom! 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6379 Kevin is the worst emotional support counselor. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6380 It's the prototype for a new "Sign here" sticker. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6381 Whoever frees the sword will slay Dodd-Frank. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
6382 Frankly, we don't care _who_ pulls it out as long as it's soon. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6383 No one has ever earned the right to be CEO. Turns out, we didn't need one. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6384 He said he always wanted a NEW desk. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6385 And this used to be the office of Director Damocles.. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6386 No one knows where he went, but we know what he left. No one knows where he went, but we know what he left. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
6387 Seems like a fair way to select the CEO to me. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6388 As succession plans go, it does have style. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6389 You’re a pretty high caliber candidate, but are you worthy of Excalibur? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
6390 Beats me. His calendar shows something about loosing the fateful lightning. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6391 He said he wanted imported granite from England. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
6392 That does it, I'm pulling out. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6393 Ah darn... I prepared for a technical interview.... 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6394 George, could You forward me the letter went out last week to our employees about the new corporate “open desk” policy? We might need to re-formulate... 1.1379 0.06246 58 53 2 3
6395 Game of Thrones? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6396 If you pull it out, you’re the new CEO. If not, it’s still a handy letter opener. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6397 In the final interviews, all CEO candidates must try to pull this sword from the desk. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
6398 If you can pull it out, you get an adjustable desktop 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6399 Do you think you’re getting candid interviews? 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
6400 Your predecessor was missed. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
6401 We're pretty much on hold here until the new CEO comes and removes it, but the only thing we know at this point is that his name is Arthur something-or-other. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
6402 We take the strengths and weaknesses very seriously 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6403 And if you go around to the other side of the desk you'll see the last VP is on the other end of that sword. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
6404 Only he who can remove the sword from...I'm sorry, that's wrong. The last boss left in kind of a hurry. 1.1379 0.06246 58 53 2 3
6405 Looks like Arthur in the mail room is about to get a promotion 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6406 You might have heard he ran with a dangerous crowd. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6407 The examination for the next CEO is to pull the sword from the desk. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
6408 They say whoever can pull it out, will be the new CEO. 1.1379 0.06246 58 53 2 3
6409 It’s our alternative to seniority 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
6410 Art King's old office. Went over to the Camelot Group. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6411 He was doing so well. . .then his pen ran out of ink! 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
6412 are you interested? $10,000 a pull. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
6413 If you can pull it out the CEO job and this corner office is all yours. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
6414 If you don't work up to the hilt, you won't last long here. 1.1356 0.05648 59 53 4 2
6415 After repeated warnings it became clear that the boss was serious about a "No George Costanza" policy. 1.1356 0.05104 59 52 6 1
6416 If I can’t pull it out I’m fired 1.1356 0.04495 59 51 8 0
6417 He may be a wizard at finance, but I wish he'd use email. 1.1356 0.05648 59 53 4 2
6418 Pull out that sword and you'll be the next Steve Jobs. 1.1346 0.04779 52 45 7 0
6419 Don't be fooled. I swear it was a mimic. 1.1346 0.04779 52 45 7 0
6420 Why were pens able to win out and laptops cannot? 1.1333 0.04426 60 52 8 0
6421 Whoever pulls it out becomes the next king of accounts payable. 1.1311 0.05470 61 55 4 2
6422 I guess Guinevere dumped him. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6423 You wouldn’t listen! I told you your idea was half baked! 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6424 Your resume looks great but this position is by divine appointment only. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6425 Excalibur had a jeweled hilt. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6426 How do we explain this to Arthur ? 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6427 Merlin said that if Arthur can pull it out, they'll make him CEO 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6428 He did mention that he was playing King Arthur in a theater group. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6429 The prophecy says he'll support #metoo. But like, he'll really mean it. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6430 The last guy could not pull it off but this office is fit for a king if one is the right caliber. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6431 That's one way to guarantee job security. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6432 Pull it out, Arthur, and you'll be treated like a king here. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6433 The poor guy perished during a hostile takeover. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6434 I mean I get that he wants us to be embracing the Gladiator spirit in meetings but the second he starts dressing like Gerald Butler I’m out of this place...but do you think it’s a Gladius or a Spatha? 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6435 The one who can pull it from the desk will be CEO... and if you know the password. Good luck! 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6436 Guess my prayers for a resolution did not take into account God's aim being off. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6437 He doesn't like the desk. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6438 The new test for becoming CEO..... 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6439 Back in the day it was getting the axe, seems like all that new leadership training is making its mark. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6440 And the search for the new CEO continues. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6441 Oh for crying out loud! You really don't believe that Steve was just abducted by Prince Harry? 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6442 If you can pull it out you are the rightful heir to this office 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6443 That's sort of a retro way of staking a claim! 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6444 Perhaps whoever can get this out can reverse Brexit 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6445 I'm betting Artie will get the promotion. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6446 There must be another to announce that winter is coming 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6447 Security is reviewing its policies and training. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6448 Whoso shall pulleth out this sword shall be our new CEO. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6449 Ya gotta be careful because he's prone to lose his temper at times! 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6450 You think Merlin is trying to make a point? 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6451 It's just my wife telling me she doesn't like our bisexuality. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6452 I can smell your cunt! 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6453 We’re replacing chopping blocks with these. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6454 It's only pine. Of course, he can pull it out. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6455 Pull this out, Arty, and you'll be the next independent prosecutor 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6456 He was just here a minute ago. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6457 He’s probably out having a happy hour mead. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6458 Should we get Arthur in here? 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6459 Have you met the new boss? Name’s Pendragon, Arthur Pendragon. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6460 New employee contest--get the sword out of the desk and you are the new CEO. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6461 We warned him that Damocles would return. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6462 Do we dare to look under the desk? 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6463 "C.E.O......Chief Excaliber Officer' 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6464 I never did think Arthur was the caliber of officer we had hoped for 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6465 Well, I guess this means he didn't get the promotion. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6466 OK but if I do, can I have a round desk? 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6467 Next time let me take a stab at it. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6468 "Apparently ATS didn't cut it" - recruitment these days. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6469 Oh, I can do it. I just didn't want to be named rightwise king born of all Sunnyvale Business Park. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6470 Whomsoever pulleth it out is the new CEO 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6471 It’s been there for 10 years. We like not having a boss. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6472 Remove it and you get the job 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6473 If you ask me, the hunt for a new CEO has just morphed into the realm of myth and legend. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6474 Henderson was ill-suited to corporate life. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6475 The executive search firm's criteria for the new CEO seem somewhat medieval. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6476 This is where we do the background checks. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6477 That lever opens the coffin. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6478 That's right, she's out of the office today presenting a staff improvement session on 'soft skills'. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6479 It's not your typical desk job. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6480 My father says if I can pull that sword out of his desk, I can take over the reigns. I'm just gonna hang in accounting till he dies. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6481 She did say that she was going to battle over this next deal. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6482 I understand that if you can pull the sword out of the desk you will be made Chairman. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6483 This morning he tweeted that he doesn’t need to pull it out. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6484 test caption 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6485 Looks like the boss was serious when he was asked how business was and he said he was killing it. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6486 Yeah so, like I said, we'll just need you as the interim CEO until our rightful ruler can pull it out of the desk. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6487 Give it a try. The base salary is $2,000,000 a year. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6488 His latest claim as indisputable leader 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6489 Your predecessor was a terrific manager, but in the end, he just couldn't resist touching the Blade of Instant Disintegration. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6490 Arthur, didn't you lose Excalibur in England, not here in New England? 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6491 It's more effective than a pink slip. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6492 We should call King Arthur. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6493 Art from the mail room is the only one who can get that thing to budge. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6494 Art always had a sense of humor. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6495 And with this, my special place in hell is secure. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6496 Arthur’s not in, well try back later 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6497 Arthur, if you can pull that out, the chair is yours. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6498 HR says they can't find anyone, but I say what the heck, just give it a few more days. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6499 If you haven't seen "Excalibur" you should probably watch it before you interview with Helen. She's a bit of a fan. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6500 And we expect our executives to comport themselves in a way that is not only professional, but chivalrous. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6501 Damned, if I can pullit out. Why don’t you try, Arthur? 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6502 Thou that can pick up sword will be granted king of the spreadsheets! 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6503 And I thought it was just a glass ceiling. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6504 His swordid ways finally caught up with him! 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6505 She came to my door asking for justice, so I shot her. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6506 It's really been a huge cost savings for the HR department. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6507 Code "Excalibur" is running amok. We have the Excalibur sword to cut it to pieces, but we have no Arthur to pull it out. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6508 Even with gun control, there seems to be no end to workplace violence. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6509 The cut is impressive enough but wait till you see the thrust. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6510 Is this his idea of diversity? 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6511 Whoever pulls it out gets the throne. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6512 Nobody can get past the pitiful, moaning sound it makes. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6513 Not in his office either, let’s see if he’s in the rotunda. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6514 I think we better listen to the new boss. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6515 His caliber was found wanting, so they Xed him just this morning. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6516 HR says the Lady of the Lake Party placed it there. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6517 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise freed from drafting memos for a month 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6518 Mr. Stone will be upset if you try to pull the sword out, Arthur. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6519 No one would pull the boss's finger, so he's trying this. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6520 He who draws the sword can log in." OR "Obviously, someone tried to hack my computer. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6521 Whomever can remove the sword becomes CEO for a year, but then the sword turns against him. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6522 Or you could just call facilities. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6523 This desk belonged to an Ex-Collaborate. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6524 No one could remove the sword, it's legend was forgotten, which led to the great recession... 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6525 Go ahead, Arthur. Try it. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6526 Biggest damn letter opener I've ever seen! 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6527 Whoever becomes king will do so on live-streaming. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6528 Who lifteth sword from desk is CEO, and champions 'gainst the fire breathing Board. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6529 Oh yeah, the last season of Game of Thrones is starting 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6530 Perfect, we'll sort it out when they get back. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6531 Well - management said there wold be some serious cutbacks around here. 1.1296 0.06500 54 50 1 3
6532 I know your name is Arthur and all, but honestly you can just work around it. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6533 I'd say this is no basis for a system of management, but then neither of us expects a mandate from the masses? 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6534 Legend has it that if you pull it out, you have to work for IKEA. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6535 If you can push it through the Boss, who is under there harassing his sexytary, you will rule! 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6536 Damocles, are you there? 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6537 Mr. Musk left clear instructions for the successor CEO search. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6538 Looks like he took the cut personally! 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6539 On second thought, you can be the once and future CEO. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
6540 what just happened? 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6541 So it is written, who so pulleth out this sword from this desk will be named the rightful CEO of all this company. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6542 and it is written that whomsoever pulleth his sword from his stone is and ever shall be rightful born Assistant VP for Interdepartmental Communcations Management 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
6543 You took a stab at it. I hoped it wood work. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
6544 I told him the how-to online wouldn't help 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
6545 Do you want to take a stab at it? 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
6546 Maybe he was the sharpest sword in the desk after all! 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
6547 Who knew you could buy a desk made out of butter on Amazon? 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
6548 The Chief Excalibur Officer sits here. You'll be at a round table. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
6549 I did the State Farm jingles, my guess is that I caught them at the Renaissance Fair 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
6550 I’ll be honest with you, pulling the sword from the desk is easy. The real test is getting Human Resources to approve you for the job. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
6551 HR decided to cut costs by eliminating pink slips. 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
6552 Your predessessor took splitting hairs to a whole level. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
6553 The last guy had some anger issues. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
6554 Not being able to pull the sword out of his desk finally gave him the hint that he would not be CEO. 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
6555 Legend has it that the employee who extracts it will be CEO 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
6556 . . . shall be the right and true King of Smothers Plastic Baby Pants, Inc.! 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
6557 Tell me again about the mightiness of your pen? 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
6558 Apologize for that, Arthur should have cleaned his desk last week. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
6559 I don't want to run Facebook. You try to draw it out and I'll film it for the meme. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
6560 What a clever way to say he got the point we were making. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
6561 He had a unique succession plan 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
6562 Hiding under the desk didn't help him. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
6563 Should we see if Arthur can get it out? 1.1250 0.04459 56 49 7 0
6564 Whoso pulleth our this sword of this stone, is rightwise able to take a half day on Fridays this Summer! 1.1250 0.05136 56 50 5 1
6565 Until then, we use the office for temp help. 1.1228 0.05050 57 51 5 1
6566 No one has dared occupy this office since Mr. Thor stormed out. 1.1224 0.04731 49 43 6 0
6567 It simplifies recruitment for our next CEO. 1.1207 0.04315 58 51 7 0
6568 He says it is the sword that was used at his Knighting ceremony. 1.1186 0.05451 59 54 3 2
6569 Our client support is legendary. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6570 Our last CEO was also an escape artist. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6571 Just don’t sexually harass the Lady of the Lake. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6572 Arthur in accounting has to be the favorite for this job. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6573 He's lucky -- I thought he was gonna get the axe. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6574 HR says we’re no longer allowed to use to term “axed.” 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6575 It appears Arthur has gone a little overboard with his new office decor 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6576 HR’s hiring process is a bit medieval 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6577 Be careful, Walt pulled it out a couple of years ago and a junior V.P. stabbed him in the back with it. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6578 Whoever can pull it out will get the smoothest shave imaginable. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6579 This is the usual 1:00 meeting? Yup. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6580 He who removes the sword from the desk will be left with a gaping hole. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6581 You go first, Harry. If it comes out, you know the janitor shanked the desk. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6582 He wasn't able to meet his deliverables, so we had to let him go. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6583 No, you don't get to keep the sword, you only get to be CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6584 Just clear the desk the the office is yours. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6585 The company really needs to update its by-laws regarding replacing CEOs. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6586 Pull the sword out of the desk and you’ll become CEO. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6587 Avalon Industries is a good place to work, I tell you! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6588 I heard he got caught sleeping under his desk. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6589 I didn't realize things were that serious. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6590 We really do need a white knight! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6591 The legend says that whoever pulls the sword from the desk is the ordained Vice President of Creative Services 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6592 Investors were insisting on a succession plan. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6593 Company legend has it that the one who can remove the sword from this stone desk is the chosen one, the one who will be CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6594 So you think you're worthy of the corner office. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6595 I'm betting on that skinny kid in the mailroom. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6596 That's the CEO's way of saying, "cut to the chase!" 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6597 Pull that out and the job's yours. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6598 The board says I will be the next CEO to be fired if I cannot pull this one off... 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6599 Anyway, I think you’ll like working here, Art. If you’ll excuse me, I have to go see a lady about a lake. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6600 That sword is mightier than your pen is. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6601 That proves it is not safe to hide under your desk. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6602 I don't like the look of his executive toy 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6603 It's a tough job, but the benefits outweigh the risks! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6604 Not interested. King would be at best a lateral move. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6605 I remember him yelling at his secretary and demanding an old-fashioned letter opener. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6606 Not sure if that action is steel tariff related, but it's sure going to cost us more in office furniture. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6607 Don’t you think Arthur may be taking this Project Excalibur a bit too far. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6608 New company recruiter. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6609 I'm thinking Middle-Ages Crazy. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6610 that glue looks strong 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6611 No, it's not a kingmaker or a box opener. It keeps the desk in place during earthquakes. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6612 I don't know about you, Jerry, but that Artie guy they just hired in HR says he knows how to do this. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6613 And I thought he was going to get the axe. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6614 I’ve learned the hard way not to pull things out ar the office. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6615 No, no. Think less 'Excalibur' and more 'Bain Capital.' 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6616 Must not have gotten the memo 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6617 ''Mike, if you need to ask why Merlin left the office like this before he transferred to Accounts Receivable, you may not be the right man for this job." 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6618 Looks like the CEO search is still going on. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6619 Only a guess, but I'm thinking the deal fell through. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6620 It's only a Caliborn . 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6621 whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk gives the healthcare plan presentation 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6622 Does it mean he works at knight or is he out looking for red tape? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6623 You pull - -it trips a trap door you're standing on. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6624 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this executive desk is rightwise Regional Manager. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6625 He wasn’t joking about wanting a Round Table. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6626 It's the latest in hiring strategies: The Arthurian Challenge. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6627 The 'Excelsior' is the latest desk accessory. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6628 If you can pull out the sword, the position is yours. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6629 That's Excalibur 2.0. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6630 Whosoever pullet out the sword will slay the activist and become CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6631 Looks like Mr. Merlin's really mad this time. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6632 Our company policy on selecting executives is legendary. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6633 Whoso pulleth it out is the rightwise Chairman. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6634 Looks like the knives are back in. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6635 Our department can expect to see some big cuts. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6636 I understand your qualifications as a CPA, Mr. Hansen, but we can only hire you if you can pull the sword from the desk. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6637 I didn't know Bill had an assistant. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6638 Staff meeting's at 11:30. Conference rooms are right downstairs, there's a round table you can't miss it. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6639 They say the sword can only be pulled out by the rightwise king of the PowerPoint. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6640 No, not a dragon: the audit committee. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6641 He who pulls the sword from the desk shall obtain the job. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6642 He was never one to spare the sordid details. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6643 In some versions of your likely career, there are floods and a mouse with a broom. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6644 No, the job's yours already. But if you can pull it out, your salary goes from 300 times the average employee up to 500 times. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6645 Our union representative is a big fan of Arthurian legend. This is how we’re handling promotions. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6646 Looks like a typical case of cut and run. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6647 The message is clear. He hated his job. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6648 I preferred the round desk, myself. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6649 I think the Board's requirement for the new CEO will limit our candidate pool. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6650 Well, those people from the Damocles Corporation rally want us to accept their takeover offer!!! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6651 We found it to be the best way to find the true CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6652 Didn't you see Pendragon's memo, Wart? Some sort? of company shakeup. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6653 Pluck it and say goodbye to middle management. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6654 Get under the desk and hold on to the sword. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6655 Whomever can pull the sword from the desk will be the next CEO 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6656 Wow, a 5th Century glass ceiling. You don't see many of those these days. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6657 Now you must prove that you are the one true CEO of Roundtable Pizza. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6658 Whoever pulls out that sword can rape and plunder right from behind this desk. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6659 This office awaits the once and future director of vertical channel integration. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6660 It’s called the kingmaker. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6661 "Yes Arthur, I thought you might find this position intriguing. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6662 No special tools allowed but you can climb up on the desk. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6663 And you should see her pen. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6664 Ya think you got what it takes, Marty? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6665 Yes, Jones, you're right. That qualification is always a little hard to describe in the ad. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6666 I heard a thud and saw Damocles sprinting for the stairs. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6667 We're trying a new angle in corporate recruiting. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6668 Notify Mueller. It wasn't the Russians, it was Merlin. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6669 Granted, it’s not the most original succession plan... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6670 The legend is, who ever can remove the sword becomes the head of CBS. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6671 the pen is mightier than the sword but our tests are inconclusive regarding the keyboard 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6672 You must want Arthur in Accounting. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6673 I didn’t know this is what he meant when he said he wanted to take a stab at it. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6674 And as I said, you're joining a true meritocracy. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6675 The prophesy states that whoever can draw forth the sword will last at least six months. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6676 Let me remind you, finding the Once and Future Executive worked for Apple... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6677 legend has it that if you can pull the sword out, you become the new CFO 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6678 The boss used to just punch walls, but that was before Game of Thrones. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6679 Got the legal papers, thrust Excalibur, and took off. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6680 Pull it out and you're President! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6681 Whomever said that the pen is mightier than the sword surely never had to deal with this! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6682 Think of this office as Camelot and that is Excalibur. Go ahead try your luck. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6683 That's one way to get yourself fired. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6684 Eventually Hagar accepted the desk job, but missed the act of pillaging. Fortunately the office refrigerator was ripe with booty. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6685 I tried to tell him he didn't want a granite desk. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6686 Legend says whoever can pull the sword from the desk will be the one to unjam the copier machine 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6687 A classic case of 'Live by the sword, die by the sword.' 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6688 Anybody who can pull it out gets to be CEO 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6689 Arthur also ordered a round desk to seat twelve 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6690 Go ahead, Arthur, give it a shot. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6691 I rather prefer our old hiring process 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6692 I don't get this modern furniture at all. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6693 Under our Occupational Health and Safety Policy, we have to get a certified Knight of the Roundtable in to remove it. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6694 I'm thinking we might want to go with a round conference table for the next CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6695 I think it means something if you are King Arthur or one of his knights..... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6696 looks like the deep state have gone, but boy, are they mad! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6697 Visualize. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6698 This was Damocles' office. He quit without notice. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6699 looks like Damocles dissed our appointment. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6700 The Board kept thinking he was trying to pull something. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6701 Are you STILL trying to "friend" Uma Thurman? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6702 We’ve come to the last part of the interview. If you can pull it out, the job is yours. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6703 You get promoted if you can pull the sword out. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6704 Something tells me our new CEO will be Danny the copy clerk. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6705 What's the point? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6706 For whosoever pulleth the sword from the desk shall be our HR director. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6707 So, like I said, if you can remove the sword from the desk you are the rightful heir to become the next CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6708 Yeah, Art had this whole "Fate Awaits" schtick going on. Riding high. Then 2008 hits and he is selling extended warranties for GMC cars. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6709 And so we await the coming of the one, true CEO 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6710 Whomsoever removes the sword gets to use his private washroom. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6711 Whomsoever pulleth the sword from the desk shall inherit all the debt of this startup. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6712 whoever can pull it out is the next CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6713 'That's odd...HR usually gives you the axe.' 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6714 He said he was building up his courage for lunch at Benihana's. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6715 All the best tyrants have one these days. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6716 Hmm, I think he's saying you need to better edit your work. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6717 And this is our opportunity for advancement office 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6718 They thought he was fit for the job cause his name was Arthur...I guess we’ll have no CEO until the real Arthur appears... 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6719 Whosoever shall draw the sword from the desk shall be crowned CEO of Arthur Andersen. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6720 Oh, uh, Arthur was laid off last week. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6721 Oh good, the sword's still here so he's probably in the bathroom. If it were gone he'd be on his crusade to unify the country 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6722 Our search committee is VERY old fashioned. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6723 Looks like our King Arthur had second thoughts! 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6724 Whoever pulls the sword out gets the office. Lucky bastard...just look at that view. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6725 Arthur's out of the office? But he didn't put his "Out of Office" message on! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6726 Oh yes, everyone loves the 30-second interviews. But we didn't anticipate that everyone we make an offer to would feel so empowered to ask for an enormous signing bonus. And all the brandishing is a little much. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6727 Fetch me my pen, Watson! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6728 Keep your pen handy in case he comes back. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6729 I'm beginning to think hiring that executive search firm was a waste of money. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6730 Where the hell is David 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6731 One last thing before we consider you for the position: Do you know anything about sword fighting? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6732 I’m sure you’ve heard the legend of the sword in the C-suite. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6733 Yes, he fell on his own letter opener, or to put it more accurately, it fell on him! 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6734 Pull that out and accounting's yours. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6735 I now feel unprepared for this year's 360 peer review. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6736 It worked for Excalibur, but no one seems to want to take the throne of the toilet paper king of northeast Ohio 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6737 Welcome to Excalibur Enterprises. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6738 The Lady of the Lake is in. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6739 The person who pulls it out gets to be CEO 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6740 This all looks a bit sordid to me 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6741 Go get Arthur in Accounting. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6742 Yup, he’s taking this company back to the Dark Ages... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6743 I guess He couldn’t take it any more. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6744 You first Arthur 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6745 Everyone said he was a great swordsman. Who thought it would end this way? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6746 In many waysThe Black Watch has become a modern organisation that moves with the times, however... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6747 You have to wonder about the caliber of some of our ex-employees. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6748 Mr. Damocles certainly can be volatile! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6749 You can only imagine the letter opener he now uses in DC. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6750 He decided it would be easier just to win the electoral college. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6751 I would never name my child Damocles 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6752 Before he died, he was known as Caliber. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6753 I think we need to call Artie from Accounting. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6754 He said we’d regret it when we let Arthur go 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6755 This is standard equipment for most offices, but if you find that you'd prefer a light saber, just call Dr. Vader in our Tech Department and he'll bring one to you. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6756 The last guy who pulled it out ended up working for Enron. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6757 No, Arthur. This is not your moment. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6758 Ah, and here is Rupert Mudoch’s Office.... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6759 Your turn to take it out. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6760 The sword in the desk. He who pulls it out, gets to be chair. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6761 I'd like to see the resume of the person who gets that position 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6762 It was a graveyard smash. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6763 The sword works in mysterious ways. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6764 I know, it's a bit cliche', but we thought it would inspire you. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6765 Artie is semi-retired now and basically uses it to open his mail. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6766 My new manager Arthur is all about the team building exercises and motivational talks. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6767 Human resources is going medieval for a new CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6768 There was a memo from Merle N. in HR, apparently they’re trying to cut back on recruiting fees.. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6769 It's Excalibur! King Arthur must have been here! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6770 Don't worry. That's only for women applicants. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6771 The one who pulls the sword out gets to be CEO 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6772 I told Arthur about the pen, but he's sticking with the sword. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6773 The job is yours if you can figure out where this damn sword keeps coming from. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6774 The employee manual says that anyone who pulls out Excalibur gets to meet with The Lady of the Lake in some company netherworld. But I wouldn't count on it based on some of the things I've seen around here. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6775 Yeah, every office has its perks 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6776 I’m guessing Mr. Andrews read yet another book on how to motivate your staff. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6777 This used to be the office of Mr. Pendragon. He had a thing for round tables. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6778 The boss’s sword is mightier than his pen. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6779 Looks like we don't have a full-employment economy yet... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6780 Your name may have got you the position, Art, but good luck come performance review. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6781 The boss is still working on his leadership skills. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6782 I think he's gonna have trouble finding Arthur! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6783 I'm the new Communications Officer. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6784 Arthur, he does as he pleases. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6785 One more teensy little hurdle and the job is yours. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6786 His wife entered the office wielding that sword in an attempt to plunge it into his secretary's back 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6787 BUT I AM ONLY THE INTERN 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6788 I think the damage is confined to wood. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6789 ..and this our HR department. Whoever can pull that sword out gets to be CEO 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6790 Yeah, I found this in my back yard some people say its worth an infinite amount of money but its to late my boss fired me so - I stabbed it in my bosses foot - i thought... 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6791 I don't know why he thinks that skinny guy, Arthur in accounting, could pull it out if we couldn't do it. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6792 He who shall pulleth the sword from the desk shall be chief executive officer. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6793 The note said “for she who is worthy.” 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6794 I am generally fairly relaxed about receiving constructive feedback , but even I have a breaking point. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6795 I thought they called it “getting the axe” 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6796 This works great to control salary increases as long as your name isn't Arthur. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6797 We were lucky to get this desk imported from England before the tariffs kicked in. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6798 I'm thinking this is even more threatening than a poison pen letter. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6799 Who so ever pulls the sword from the desk is granted the golden parachute. I’m betting on Gladys from Collections 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6800 Surprising, the Trade War just started.. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6801 He liked to think of himself as an ExcelCEOr. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6802 He apparently lost it when he learned that this was considered to be a concealed weapon. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6803 Somewhere here is the key to “Network Admin Override”. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6804 He did schedule a meeting with me for never. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6805 I warned you about ordering a round table for the conference room. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6806 Will Shortz called it an "EPEE", but you know he's always trying to flaunt some lingo 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6807 Fail and I pulleth you from Director of Financial Affairs. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6808 Something tells me I’m not cut out for this job. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6809 Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical furnishing ceremony. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6810 At least their is no drug test. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6811 Our editor does not agree that the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6812 Final test: Draw the sword and persuade Myrtle to validate thy parking. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6813 Whoso pulleth out this Sword of this desk, is rightwise District Manager of All the New England Region. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6814 This is the last phase of our 12-step interview process. The job is yours if it's removed. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6815 Prophet of the Sword of Excalibur? I thought he said he was proficient with Word and Excel. That's the last time we outsource from the company's British branch. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6816 Ed was trying out his new jumbo toothpick. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6817 Excalibur Enterprises seeks to reverse trend. Applicants apply within. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6818 No, the job isn't necessarily yours if you pull our the sword. That's where our last CEO make his last stand. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6819 Whoso pulleth this sword from yonder desk is the rightwise VP of Northwest Distribution. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6820 He sets a very high standard. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6821 HR was told to be more creative with their promotions policy. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6822 Mr. Ringling will see you shortly. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6823 Do you think King Arthur had to brave Monday morning board meetings in Camelot? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6824 Pull the sword from the desk and you get a 10 dollar coupon for Olive Garden. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6825 Arthur's not getting the message about the clean desk policy is he... 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6826 Hmm he said he was on the cutting edge 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6827 The one who can pull it out will be the new CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6828 Looks like they're slashing upper management again. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6829 He believes in ABC. Always Be Cosplaying. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6830 Always remember Farnsworth, at Merlin Enterprises, we value ambition. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6831 CEO PENDRAGON IS GOING TO BE HARD TO REPLACE. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6832 Boss prefers The Round Table, we work a lot of knights together. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6833 Marvin will probably be right back. He’s always forgetting his storm shield. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6834 It comes in handy when Kim Jong Un sends me a letter. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6835 Camelot this ain't 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6836 They say the one who pulls it out will be known as the one, true 'New Greg.' 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6837 It's a requirement for promotion. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6838 It's actually man-made composite from Panama. Go figure. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6839 Nothing is in stone. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6840 He would not let himself change to fit the company style. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6841 The prophecy is, whoever pulls the sword out will be in charge of the office Christmas forever. That's why no one has ever tried. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6842 Looks like Howard is going to run. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6843 If you can remove it, the job is yours. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6844 I guess the SJW is out to lunch. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6845 yeah my big loud truck wasn't really selling how big my dick is to the female coworkers so I decided to get an upgrade 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6846 And only Greenspan can pull it out! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6847 Finally, thankfully, death to integrity! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6848 Vacation and health benefits are reserved for those who can pull the sword from the desk. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6849 Most direct route to the K-suite! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6850 THIS WAS THE OFFICE OF THE GENIUS BEHIND POST -IT NOTES 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6851 My money's on the ex-wife and not Excalibur. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6852 Looks sword fishy to me 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6853 This desk was Jeff Sessions’s, before the Single Orange Hair Broke 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6854 So, ya... it is not your Obama soft skill employment test. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6855 He’s gone Lancelot on us. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6856 You should see how they determine executive compensation. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6857 Oh, God, the Sword of Deskmesticles! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6858 Get that thing off my desk! I have my own ways of showing them who's in power! 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6859 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is right wise vice president of operations. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6860 I am not sure, but I think he is trying to tell us something. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6861 Oh, ...Trump finally fired King Arthur 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6862 The Board couldn't decide on a successor. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6863 Arthur will want to see this. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6864 The boss thinks the sword is mightier. Get it? Hahaha, you're gonna like working here. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6865 Your predecessor thought very highly of himself. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6866 Where's the Boss? He's lying under the table with a sword in his back. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6867 I think you're just about perfect for the job. If you could just show me one more thing.... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6868 Legend has it that only the true CEO can pull the sword from the desk. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6869 President Trump found a black jellybean in his bowl. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6870 I think your "book" has been rendered irrelevant. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6871 It looks like the new boss still hasn't decided if the sword is mightier than the keyboard. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6872 Ah yes...Well there is just one more thing. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6873 Yes, tradition rules here. Letter opening ritual demands fencing skills. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6874 I didn't even get the memo. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6875 Just follow the new polity on transparency. Keep the desk and post the job on "damocles.com" 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6876 I'll be backin 20 from H.R. to see if you're a fit for us. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6877 This morning, organizers sent a letter to the magazine’s editor, David Remnick, asking that the institution and its corporate owner, Condé Nast, voluntarily recognize their membership in the NewsGuild of New York. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6878 Interview? No need.Simply draw the sword and you're the new CEO. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6879 I guess Damocles is out to lunch. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6880 We're trying the Arthurian approach to picking our next CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6881 We need to work on that stationary budget. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6882 am not going to pull it, until i see the company balance sheet :) 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6883 He who draws the sword shall own the company and it's debt. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6884 Who wants to become boss? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6885 Briggs was the first to experience the new budget cuts. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6886 Yea, the "Me Too" people walked in here and cut them right off. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6887 I’m sorry, young man. Sometimes a good resume just isn’t enough. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6888 Hansen thrust and Perry dodged, spun and evacuated 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6889 The attacker should have used a pen instead. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6890 Welcome to your office 009, the budget has been cut so we can't afford security or surveillance equipment or housekeeping. However, we have decided to go ahead and run the program, "American-Style". 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6891 He who.... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6892 The new VP is really on edge. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6893 If you pull it out Arthur you get the office! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6894 The last occupant preferred a medieval theme, but you're not stuck with it. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6895 Actually, it's the result of not making full partnership in the firm. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6896 Does this looked staged to you? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6897 That does it! Better IM Parsifal ! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6898 You were right. This is Arthur's office 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6899 Art was trying to make a point but the teak got the best of him. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6900 I.T. gave up. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6901 Whoso pulleth out this sword haveth the job. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6902 What does it mean when it's pointing west, again? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6903 If you can bring Arthur Treacher's back to it's glory days this should be the easy part. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6904 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise CEO born. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6905 Whomever draws it forth shall lead the nights of round table discussions. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6906 ...and the CEO position will remain open until such times as one worthy is able to draw the sword. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6907 They say only he who pulls the sword out is fit to be vice president of accounting 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6908 Once the sword is removed, it will be back to business as usual." "You want to have a go at it? 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6909 I thought the interview would be based on the story of Abraham....I have to call my wife 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6910 This all started when the boss got into amine 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6911 The previous head of the Anger Management Department just couldn’t cut it. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6912 Art has job security locked down. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6913 Let’s hope he wasn’t hiding under that desk 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6914 Behold Ex-Cali-Fur. If you can pull it from the desk, you are our new Beverly Hills sales manager of used mink coats. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6915 And here's our executive search committee. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6916 As it is inscribed in our Articles of Incorporation: "He who from the desk can pull the sword clear, shall increase sales 35% year over year. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6917 Honestly, Jefferson, I think the money we are paying for Arthur's shrink is a huge waste of money. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6918 Whosoever withdraweth the sword from the desk shall be the next CEO. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6919 ...and whoever can pull it out of there,.... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6920 Steve Arthur wants to remind everyone that he was descended from King Arthur 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6921 Looks like Pendragon's unhappy with management again. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6922 Legend has it that if you are the one who can pull the sword from the desk you become the king of budget cuts. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6923 You'll need to remove that to become head of HR. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6924 I find the desktop model more comfortable than the laptop. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6925 Pull it out and the CEO job here at Excalibur is yours. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6926 So much for the cold war civil defense drill. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6927 Who’s the new CEO? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6928 You go first, I'm still working out my angle. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6929 The last guy recused himself. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6930 We prefer to find our CEO the way they did it in Merry Old England. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6931 Old-fashioned abduction is so wasteful. A stuck sword and a ruined desk every time. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6932 I pulled it out last week, but the option package was no good. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6933 Strange but true, his middle name was Damocles. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6934 A man of some caliber has left us. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6935 You see, when a sword and desk love each other very much... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6936 You know the drill, but think of how it ended for Arthur. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6937 "Et tu Bruce"? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6938 Arthur didn't take the news lightly 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6939 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise executive regional manager. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6940 Shouldn't Excalibur be in the Round table? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6941 I'm gratified to see his last wish was for Excalibur Industries stick to tradition. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6942 Only Arthur in IT can get it out. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6943 The legend says that whoever gets it out will never again get out by 5. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6944 Yeah, with those sales figures—he fell on his sword” 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6945 I took that one on safari at a local amusement park. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6946 There is no special treatment here, even for the boss's son. You'll use the same men's room key as the rest of us. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6947 All he said was, "I'm gonna take this job and shove it," but I think someone will want to pull it out anyway. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6948 I tried to tell you that our new CEO is a stickler for spelling, punctuation and grammar. Now do you believe me? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6949 It's a post it note to say he'll be back. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6950 None have succeeded, though many have tried. But, yes, you get this office if you can pull out the sword. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6951 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, shall become CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6952 Arthur is a jerk. No way he can pull it out. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6953 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise Vice President of all Marketing. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6954 He who is fit to rule the office could pull it from the desk. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6955 They say Art didn't have the caliber to pull it off. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6956 Our interview process is pretty basic. But if you do get the job, I do have to warn you that the office furniture stays. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6957 Whoso pulleth this sword from this desk of wood is truly destined for middle management. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6958 I told you we shouldn’t have the company party at Medeviel Times. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6959 We need to riposte for this position. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6960 The truth finally caught up to him. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6961 Sorry Johnson, but HR has banned us from any "pulling on the bosses sword" contests. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6962 This could be legendary. Or not. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6963 Whosoever shall remove the sword will be CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6964 They say whoever pulls the sword out of the desk is the new CEO! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6965 Know any MBA's named Arthur? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6966 He was always a little too over-dramatic! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6967 We still haven’t managed to get a CEO past this stage of the approval process. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6968 Legend says, he who frees the sword from the desk shall be CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6969 That's Schwarzenegger's way of telling us to get another 'Conan' sequel. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6970 Maybe we should call Arthur from I.T. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6971 We've decided on the Arthurian-esque prophecy approach to finding a new CEO. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6972 If you can pull out the sword the job is yours. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6973 This looks like it was drawn in 30 seconds and never fixed up. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6974 If King Arthur could do it, so can I 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6975 Only the true CEO can lift that letter opener. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6976 The interview is 5 minutes. When your time is up, go get the next in line, Arthur Pendragon. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6977 Siegfried is on at the Met! 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6978 Her new executive coach is very aggressive. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6979 This is going to be a long meeting. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6980 I'm annoyed they didn't just send a memo, but I'm just relieved the shareholders finally approved our Britain sovereignty acquisition. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6981 If you pull the sword out, you get the job. HR is in England, so, you know... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6982 That's one way to give your two weeks. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6983 If they think the position is their divine right, we won't have to pay them. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6984 Only he who can remove the sword gets the Goldfarb account 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6985 Hard to believe, I know, but Trump swears only He knows where to hunt these... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6986 Rainbow and arrow, one shot. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6987 The sword took exception to, 'The pen is mightier than the sword.' 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6988 Jim you work out right? Have at it. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6989 My grandkids think I picked it up in Neverland but the truth is that I put it together from a kit. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6990 We call it executivescalibur. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6991 Whosoever pulleth out the sword of this desk is rightwise CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6992 Her mother left her with almost enough to keep her occupied. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6993 The boss' parting words were, "Whoso pulleth out this sword of this wood, is rightwise CEO born of all this company." 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6994 I'm not sure I get the point...does this mean my stock doesn't vest? 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
6995 I guess Arthur punched out for the day. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6996 We are still looking for the right person. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
6997 We'd better call Art in maintenance. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6998 Clearly, Human Resources will struggle to ever find a CEO replacement for Arthur King! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
6999 On a comfortable queen-sized mattress. Why do you ask? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7000 Their right.... the old is new. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7001 Whosoever pulleth it out is rightwise King 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7002 Our IT guy, Merlin, has still to figure this out. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7003 Has the dragon been slayed? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7004 Damn! Old Clete is off today. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7005 The boss is an old fashion kind of guy. If you want a promotion, you have to remove the sword, slay a dragon and bring back its head. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7006 Jeff! Did you get the new Surface Pro? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7007 No man can lift the sword lest he is the rightful ruler of the window office. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7008 I think Glenn is taking this Game of Thrones piece too seriously 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7009 Legend has it that whomever removes the sword is responsible for next quarter's earnings. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7010 Slowly, on three, hand me your pen. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7011 They say if you can pull it out, you become the boss. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7012 Live in agony or die in agony. Whatever suits you best. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7013 Whoever can pull the sword out can be CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7014 I guess Mr. Lancealot had to make cutbacks. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7015 Obviously, there's no collusion. But we're looking for the Holy Grail. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7016 The Board has been deadlocked for months. Thankfully, this miracle appeared last week with the inscription, 'Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is rightwise born CEO.' 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7017 Where's Bill? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7018 He takes cutting through the red tape literally. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7019 They say whoever can pull it out is our rightful CEO. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7020 Of course, if you opt NOT to ‘Pass a Camel Through the Eye of a Needle’... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7021 Can you please check to see if Smith is in . 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7022 Dennis Galahad isn't happy about your promotion. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7023 Looks like someone is into King Arthur. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7024 Arthur clearly thinks he is the only one worthy of the corner office. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7025 and this is the room that no one uses 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7026 It's the only way to the top, Arthur... 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7027 Maybe Pence can pull it out. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7028 whosoever pulleth the sword from the desk getteth the window office. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7029 And since the re-org, it won't even get you a corner office. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7030 This tells me he's gone for lunch at King Arthur's Courtyard. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7031 Excalibur Inc takes pride in having never axed an employee. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7032 The HR department have outsourced the CEO position again. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7033 Arthur’s back from his vacation. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7034 You do the status update this time. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7035 If you get the sword out of the desk, the office is yours. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7036 OK--so, we've nicknamed this phase of the interview, "Excalibur. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7037 Legend has it whoever draws it shall be president. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7038 We're hopeful for the midterms... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7039 Looks like Arthur's out of a job 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7040 The HR manager suggested it and the chair's been empty ever since. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7041 i guess my boss is having a bad day........... 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7042 I thought Donald was under the desk having sex with his daughter. Late night TV seems to suggest that is occurring. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7043 If you can pull it out, a round table come with it. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7044 So you see Arthur, I’m positive you’re the right man for the job. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7045 There are no guarantees, but the last guy who pulled it out got massive stock options. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7046 Lance if you can pul it out a lot will come your way 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7047 This explains the new round table for the board of directors. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7048 He's sure taking these budget cuts seriously this year. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7049 The whole editorial department is counting on you to be mightier than your predecessor. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7050 I guess someone else is really god around here. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7051 So if you'll submit your cover letter and pull out the sword the promotion is yours. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7052 When it comes to selecting a new CEO, we find that a resume just doesn't tell the whole story. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7053 You wanted a round table. Show me what you got. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7054 Only the true CEO can pull the sword from the desk. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7055 Someone took his weapons basket away. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7056 The screen say something about the sword and the stone... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7057 Go ahead and pull out the sword, Art. You may not become a king, but you'll find it a lot easier to open the drawer. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7058 When the chairman offered to fall on his sword for the company, apparently, the Vice President took him seriously. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7059 Looks like the desk is also mightier than the sword. Let's try the computer next. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7060 I see the succession plan is in effect. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7061 Remember your training. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7062 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk shall be President and CEO 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7063 Excalibur Enterprises will be yours some day, Arthur, provided you can figure out how to give me more desk space. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7064 Poor Carl. I heard it got him right in the dickey. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7065 Only the one fit to rule over the Trump financial empire can pull the sword out of this desk. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7066 Is this why he jumped out the window? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7067 This is Arthur's office. Don't worry, though, he's mostly harmless. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7068 The last guy's back gave, so we're still looking... 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7069 See, it's a win-win situation... if a worker pulls out the sword, they get employee-of-the-month PLUS they have to buy me a new desk. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7070 How many years have we been waiting for a CEO now? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7071 Draw the sword, pass a credit check and you're the new CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7072 If you can remove it from the desk the job is yours, and you get to keep the sword. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7073 To answer your question, Arthur, the person who can pull that sword from the desk, will be our new President of Excalibur Steel. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7074 Archaeologists credit it to the Millennial /#me/too era. Who the hell knows what it means. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7075 Exofficechair! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7076 Aha, head of the dead letter office 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7077 The first cut is the deepest !!! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7078 Where is ol' “Office Maximus”? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7079 The legend of the 500 Fortunes says that "Whoso pulleth out this sword is fit to rule among the 1%" 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7080 We've had trouble filling this job 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7081 The consultants recommended first, we change the name to "The Grail Corporation" and second, "whoso pulleth out this sword of this stone and anvil, is rightwise CEO born." 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7082 My co-workers are so incompetent, they can't even stab me in the back the right way! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7083 Welcome to Accounts Medieval. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7084 Who so pulleth out this sword is rightwise CEO of Camelot Enterprises. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7085 many have died, many have tried pulling the sword from the desk. we do need a new CEO. wanna give it a try? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7086 After you have tried, you will meet our HR manager 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7087 They say the one who can pull it from the desk is the rightful Vice President of Client Operations, Northeast Division. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7088 We couldn't find a stone... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7089 I guess it was a composite after all, eh? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7090 The last CEO didn't fare too well... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7091 Did you hear about him and Guinevere from marketing? I think it was a first-date gift. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7092 Never mind 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7093 Legend has it that whosoever can remove the sword shall have dominion over the Enterprise Project Management Office. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7094 He who can remove this sword becomes the CEO 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7095 You ever seen The Sword in The Stone? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7096 Okay, you may turn out to be rightwise born to reign around here. But you're going to have to use it to slash dividends. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7097 Legend has it, that He will return from the White House, the moment someone pulls it from the desk. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7098 You must pull out the sword to become CEO. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7099 Great guy, impressive resume, but he couldn't get it out of the stone so we had to let him go. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7100 Every so often she likes to show her subordinates that she can exert a lot of strength. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7101 Just make sure you address him as “Mr. Thor”. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7102 As legend has it: ""Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise CEO". 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7103 I've heard of living and dying by the sword, but never calling out sick. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7104 "HR is sending up another applicant". 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7105 Excaliber? No, the boss is just a weirdo who likes swords. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7106 This time HR is making some deep cuts. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7107 If you can pull that out, getting us out of receivership should be a snap! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7108 It prevents the CEO from falling on her sword during the current hostile corporate takeover. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7109 Call it a broadsword and you'll be in HR before you know it. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7110 It's the final test. For $20,000,000 a year, our true CEO should be able to draw the sword out of the stone inside the desk. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7111 Whoever can pull the sword out of the desk is our next CEO 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7112 We're looking for a new CEO. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7113 The executive recruiter said this is the only way to be certain we hire the right candidate 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7114 Only The One Born to be CEO can remove it from the desk. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7115 He said, "en garde, I quit." And he walked out. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7116 So, this is what he meant when he said he'd 'sword out' matters. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7117 He was going for his nuts. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7118 Whoso pulleth out this letter opener from this desk is more patient than the last guy. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7119 A little bit of crazy-glue, and my interim CEO position became permanent. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7120 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise chief executive officer of Reliable Washing Machine Parts, Inc. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7121 Apparently Human Resources has a new way to test whether you are ready for a promotion 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7122 According to legend, the person who can draw this sword will receive a full bonus this year. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7123 The Board wasn't happy with the latest quarterly report 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7124 Whosoever pulleth out this sword will be CEO. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7125 Excelibur® 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7126 He tweeted something about some chick in a pond throwing it at him, and that he needed the name of Carson's furniture supplier. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7127 Camelot sure has changed...! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7128 I told you he was no good. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7129 The nigh-shift can be difficult alone. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7130 I'm no Sieglinde, but if you're Siegmund, and you know what to do with that sword, I'm all yours! 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7131 I guess there's no work today 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7132 ...and ye who pulls sword from yonder desk shall becometh CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7133 Besides us he blamed the desk. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7134 I'm under here.The boss back stabbed me again. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7135 And why, might I ask, are you requesting a round conference table for your office, Arthur? 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7136 Whoever can draw forth the sword will become king of conference room "B." 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7137 Whoever can pull the sword from the desk shall be the new CEO. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7138 If you pull the sword from the desk, the CEO seat is yours. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7139 paper rock scissors , to see who the new boss is 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7140 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise office king born. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7141 And then there's the office mumblety peg. How are your inseams? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7142 The pen may be mightier than the sword, but times are changing. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7143 I think that’s exactly where I left my pen. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7144 Whoever pulls it out is the new CEO 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7145 HR here has a flair for the dramatic. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7146 The Sword in the Blackstone. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7147 After the Michael Cohen fiasco, we figured we needed a different approach for identifying the rightful CEO. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7148 This is IBM's current strategy for selecting a new CEO. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7149 It’s like ‘The Sword in the Stone,’ but unfortunate that Mr. Stone was hiding under the desk 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7150 Let's hope the new boss adheres to the tried and true statement "the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7151 FINALLY 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7152 He thought it would be a mightier than the boss’s pen. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7153 So, we no longer have to listen to those lame statements about where they see themselves in five years. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7154 But my name's not Arthur..... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7155 Disappointing! He claimed he had removed it himself before he moved to the White House. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7156 The last guy said he was Arthur, but it turned out he was Damocles. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7157 Of course, you're welcome to take Mr. Damocles' office. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7158 “He firmly believes the sword is mightier than the Tweet”. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7159 And as you can see, our succession plan here at K. Arthur Industries will pretty much work itself out. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7160 Arthur wants everyone to consider him the heir apparent. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7161 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise CEO born of all Disney. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7162 Next, we'll have you meet with our development team. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7163 You don't need an MBA just pull the darn thing out and the job's yours. You don't need an MBA just pull the darn thing out of the desk and the job's yours. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
7164 It seems like it wants to answer the phone! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7165 For the millionth time Arthur, the sword goes UNDER the desk! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7166 I understand he went medival. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7167 Arthur is reliving his youth. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7168 And to the victor go the spoils ... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7169 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this stone bureau, is rightwise possessor born of the office with glorious uptown view. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7170 Mr. Merlin says you could really enhance your career if you just cleaned off your desk, Artie. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
7171 Go get Art in accounting. He can take care of this. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7172 He was on the cutting edge of the next big design prototype. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
7173 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is the true-born CEO. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7174 it is told that he who draws the sword from the desk is destined for the corner office. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7175 Whaddya mean, "Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise king"? We need a CEO, dammit! 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7176 I heard we were slashing employment. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7177 "The legend foretells that if you can pull the sword out, you become the new CFO". 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7178 Dammit, Damocles! 1.1154 0.05924 52 48 2 2
7179 It's called "The Whining Sword". The only known person able to extract it is Donald Trump. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7180 Maybe it's a letter opener. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7181 They say if you can pull the sword out you'll be the next CEO. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7182 Reorg'ed just in time. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7183 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise king born of all England, Inc. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7184 They say only the greediest night can pull the sword from the desk and be crowned as C.E.O. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7185 HR went with the Excalibur test when Justin Bieber karaoke proved too soul crushing. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7186 Can you believe it? There gonna let Arthur, that kid from the mailroom, try it. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7187 If you want the job, you must first pull out the sword. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7188 Heads will one day roll, Wilson. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7189 The moving guy got a little carried away. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7190 Believe me it comes out should you ask for a raise. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7191 Ralph Pendragon new he was the rightful heir to the throne. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7192 The Board told him to fall on his sword,but it got him first. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7193 Go on try to take it out, the boss just quit last week and we need to decide on a new one. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7194 That's deinitely going to leave a mark. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7195 The CEO position has been open for a long time. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7196 She came out of the Central Park Reservoir and just left it there. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7197 This is how we will elect our next President and King for life. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7198 H.R. recommended this as the only sure-fire way to select a CEO who is "pure of heart." 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7199 He thought that if he removed the sword he would be CEO, but if he tried and failed, he would be copy boy forever. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7200 You touch it... No, you touch it. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7201 He always thought he hadn't enough calibre for the job 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7202 Legend has it that he who can remove the sword will inherit the position of Chief Ribbon Cutter at every new store opening! 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7203 It can be withdrawn only by someone with perfect handwriting. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7204 They rushed her to the emergency room. The medics thought it was a rare case of female hernia. 1.1154 0.05924 52 48 2 2
7205 I didn't know he was under there.... 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7206 Uh, Merlin, perhaps an appropriate way to test employees in 1190AD, but.. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7207 King Arthur's Pest Control...only way to get rid of the damned things 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7208 HR is writing up 'swordplay guidelines' as we speak. 1.1154 0.05924 52 48 2 2
7209 I know you think you're 'bound for greatness', Mr. President, but according to the Grand Wizard, this is the real test... 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7210 There's a time for daring and there's a time for caution, a wise man understands this is a time for caution! 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7211 Extract it and you are the new head of employee reorganizations and terminations. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7212 This isn't really what I trained for. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7213 He's a true believer that the old technologies are best when it comes to choosing leaders. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7214 Arthur used to have this office. Good luck getting that thing out of there. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7215 Merlin fired him. Contact our recruiting service. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7216 We're looking for someone who's willing to share pens. The last guy was a real pen-dragon. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7217 You would think our sales department vp wouldn’t fall to intimidation. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7218 So, Todd’s been reading King Arthur again 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7219 You can have Arthur’s old office. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7220 HR calls it Excalibur. Short for executive caliber. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7221 If your heart is true and you can pull out the sword you've got the job 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7222 They say the one who closes the Rosenblatt account will remove the sword and become king. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7223 No one can slash the budget like Bob. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7224 Excalibur Trumps Trumpublicans! 1.1154 0.05924 52 48 2 2
7225 No, no blood, that's not the point. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7226 Want to give it a try? Whoever removes it gets a reserved parking space in the deck. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7227 A young guy named Arthur is interviewing next 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7228 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right to be the CEO 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7229 Unless someone's name is Arthur, I think we'll need a new desk. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7230 That's Arthur's favorite letter opener. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7231 Does this mean I have to call the new IT guy "Sir"? 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7232 The board wanted to take a new approach. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7233 I guess that contract has been "cut" 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7234 Laptop camera is on. Jerry must have just streamed another conspiracy video for his YouTube channel. 1.1154 0.05924 52 48 2 2
7235 Whoever gets it out wins a round desk. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7236 'Art was laid off last year. We can't seem to clear his desk.' 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7237 He on another quest again. Maybe we can reschedule you for 2:00 p.m. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7238 The last one able to use the president's "behind the scenes office" was Obama. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7239 Looks like our annual progress report is due. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7240 Don't tell HR. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7241 So the boss is 'he who draws the sword from the desk'? 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7242 It’s either that or somehow conjure up his password, 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7243 Well, Arthur, good luck. If you can pull it off, you get two weeks paid vacation. 1.1154 0.05924 52 48 2 2
7244 “No, no, that is the CEO of Are You Not Entertainment?’ 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7245 if someone pulls it out they get a corner window 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7246 I got the limited edition with Arthur's original sword. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7247 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise gets the promotion. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7248 Even if the pen IS mightier than the sword - the sword makes for an enhanced visual. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7249 I bagged the bookends on safari in the Serengeti. My 6 year old granddaughter gave me the other one. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7250 And this is Arthur Pendragon's desk. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7251 Do you think this strikes the right note of middle aged whimsy? 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7252 The table finally decided to commit suicide. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7253 The successful candidate will get some really royal benefits. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7254 Better warn the police, Shae’s ditching again. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7255 That job is undoable. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7256 You don't think calling our startup ExcelÜber seems a tad derivative? 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7257 King Arthur takes a shot at the corperate world. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7258 Exit interviews by video chat may have taken a turn for the worse today. I assume you will tell the boss? 1.1154 0.05924 52 48 2 2
7259 Sir Lancelot noticed that our flag was in another office building. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7260 Turns out the sword is indeed mightier than the pen! 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7261 These tests to pick Paul Ryan's successor are getting out of hand. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7262 He may be out, after all . . . 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7263 Whoso pulleth out this sword from the desk rightwise gets this ergonomic chair. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7264 They're looking for strength...it's an Excalibur interview. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7265 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise CEO born of all the company. He is not here that shall achieve the sword, but doubt not God will make him known. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7266 The boss has been on a crusade to cut costs. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7267 If you can pull it, you've got the job 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7268 Believe it or not, your contact allows the board to fire you for 'cause' if you can't do it. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7269 But how did he know she was hiding under the desk? 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7270 The designer misread the order as “Chief Excalibur Officer.” 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7271 Who says there's no magic bullet. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7272 pull it out and you will be the next king of England 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7273 You must pull the sword from the desk to prove yourself worthy of the legendary unpaid internship. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7274 You've been invited to join the round conference table. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7275 I don’t know if that is Excalibur or not, but I sure could use that CEO dough. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7276 He who can draw the sword from the desk shall be the CEO foretold by the ancient prophecy who will restore profitability in the third quarter. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7277 I think I misunderstood the "Excalibur Promotion" email... 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7278 I know Management said the company would be making cuts, but this seems excessive. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7279 No ones tried to pull it out yet. We hear if you do you are the Boss!!! 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7280 And it's said that whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is rightwise born king of this entire rental suite. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7281 This is a heck of a way to request a raise! 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7282 Don't worry, it's easier to pull out of than the 401k. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7283 Excalibur has sold out to the highest bidder. 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7284 'He said he wanted to speak truth to power. But it seems power fought back' 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
7285 The point is very sharp so watch your knees. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
7286 Subtlety was never one of Baldwin's strong points. 1.1132 0.05154 53 48 4 1
7287 And to think, he was so worried about getting the axe... 1.1132 0.04394 53 47 6 0
7288 And they say to love the sinner 1.1132 0.04394 53 47 6 0
7289 Alright, Dan, let's see if you get a bonus this year. 1.1132 0.04394 53 47 6 0
7290 We use the Camelot Executive Recruiting Agency. 1.1132 0.04394 53 47 6 0
7291 We’re hoping that Trump’s steel tariffs will prevent this kind of thing from happening again. 1.1132 0.05154 53 48 4 1
7292 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise offered the corner office. 1.1132 0.04394 53 47 6 0
7293 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this stone and anvil, will be rightwise vested 30%. 1.1132 0.05154 53 48 4 1
7294 If you pull it out, you get promoted to CEO. 1.1132 0.05154 53 48 4 1
7295 Mr. Pendragon prefers the phrase "Kingdom Executive" now. 1.1132 0.05154 53 48 4 1
7296 The interview is tough, but get the job and they treat you like royalty. 1.1132 0.04394 53 47 6 0
7297 He who can pull the sword of freedom from the desk of mega-bucks software employment drudgery shall have Life! Life! 1.1132 0.04394 53 47 6 0
7298 No, of course you don't have to pull it out. We'll reset it... Boot-lick. 1.1132 0.05815 53 49 2 2
7299 Wow, this new intern is a lot like that guy on the news, should we call somebody? 1.1132 0.05815 53 49 2 2
7300 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise company president. 1.1132 0.04394 53 47 6 0
7301 He quickly ran home when he heard it was 'Viking Week' on National Geographic Chanel. 1.1132 0.04394 53 47 6 0
7302 And lastly, remove the sword and the position is yours. 1.1132 0.05154 53 48 4 1
7303 And yet another Marvel project. Enough already! 1.1132 0.05154 53 48 4 1
7304 Arthur Freeman, our last CEO, he did it, he was a legion in his own mind. 1.1132 0.05815 53 49 2 2
7305 It sure is getting harder and harder to get promoted around here... 1.1111 0.05711 54 50 2 2
7306 Whosoever removeth it gets the corner office for life. 1.1111 0.05711 54 50 2 2
7307 As you can see, Excalibur won. 1.1111 0.05062 54 49 4 1
7308 I think our anti-malware strategy might need updating. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7309 No... He's not sending us a message.He does this every time he rents EXCALIBUR . 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7310 Trump left it when he moved to Washington. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7311 We generally try to keep this door locked. In recent years there have been a number of incidences where Prince Charles and more recently Hillary Clinton have been caught astride the desk tugging at the sword and screaming "Its my turn!" 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7312 We've found that we don't need to pay anyone to occupy this office. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7313 Whoso pulleth out this sword Excaliber from this desk is rightwise CEO of all the company. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7314 It is said that only the one who can pull the sword out of the desk is fit to be our Human Resources Director. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7315 The stone didn’t work with our optics. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7316 This will explain the round table in the board room. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7317 There was a misunderstanding when he told us we'd be working knights. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7318 HR thinks we can find a top notch candidate. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7319 A strong majority of CEOs agree it's the best to way to pick and judge our next CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7320 After his last job, the boss swore off nights and round tables. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7321 And, with your top floor view here at Arthur&Damocles, your predecessor’s seppuku letter opener 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7322 I think Arthur’s lost his mind. Why can’t he just choose between us? 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7323 and whoever can pull it out gets a promotion? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7324 If you can pull out that sword, you will be the new Regional Second Vice-President of Purchasing. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7325 Excalibur Consulting: pulling ahead of the rest. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7326 Percy's obsession with protohistory was one of his charms until we had to find a replacement. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7327 Go down to the pharmacy and see if you can't get some lubricant. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7328 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk and chair, is rightwise CEO born. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7329 Pull the sword out and the V.P. of Finance job is yours. Leave it and maybe one day protect yourself from angry shareholders. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7330 The Board seems to be serious about the old order changeth. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7331 First, a round table in the conference room - now this! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7332 We've called it Excelibur but it doesn't make balancing the budget any more fun. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7333 I see Charlie's been called in for Knight duty again. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7334 Merlin must have asked for a raise. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7335 Don't think about it. The last employee to pull it out was fired. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7336 If I can pull it out, do I get to be CEO? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7337 No doubt...he had HR issues. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7338 Art, pull the sword out of the desk and you will be king of sales. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7339 Family heirloom or not Brad, you're our Human Resources Manager and that sword is a problem. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7340 I tried to warn him about gravity. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7341 I told H.R. to get him the round one! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7342 Whoever pulls out the sword from that desk will be the new CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7343 He wanted to be King, but he couldn't pull it out. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7344 The board won't let anyone try to pull it out 'til the merger goes through. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7345 It was hard to remove the body without disturbing Excalibur. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7346 Whosoever canst remove the sword shall be CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7347 Many with aspirations of being CEO have tried to remove it, but all have failed. We glued it back in 2008. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7348 Whoever has the strength to pull the sword from the stone shall be granted a half day on Friday. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7349 I heard the board’ s only requirement now to be CEO is to not sexually harass your employees and the power is yours... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7350 Our offer’s on the table. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7351 They say only the true Junior HR Manager can remove it. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7352 The successful candidate gets the job and the boss's daughter. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7353 It’s the fairest way to decide who gets the desk with the swivelly chair. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7354 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise our new chief privacy officer 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7355 Well they did say the application process would involve leadership, strength, and nobility. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7356 Your ability to pull the sword from this desk is preferred, but not required. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7357 Mr. Damocles is out today. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7358 Memo says "He who pulls out this sword of this desk is the right wise king of the corner office". 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7359 His new industrial strength paperweight should cut the mustard.” “His new industrial strength paperweight should cut the mustard. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7360 Whoever can remove it is the true CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7361 Makes me wonder if Arthur in shipping will be our next CEO. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7362 Work on it from time to time, and if you can get it out -- fine. If not, that's OK too. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7363 Our record on minority hiring may not be stellar, but at least it's a simple test. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7364 And then Arthur said: "You'll miss me when I'm gone". 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7365 If I catch you looking at seppuku porn again, Phil, you’re fired. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7366 Now we see if you are destined to lead accounts receivable. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7367 There's only one thing you have to do to get this promotion. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7368 It's an invitation to rule your very own beaurucracy 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7369 Well, I'm glad I got hired before Artie took over. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7370 Whoever can pull it out becomes the new CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7371 They say the true CEO will pull it from the desk. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7372 As I said, I am holding a signed job offer letter, but you must come out and open it with that. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7373 ...so he just pretended to be King of New York during the campaign. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7374 But would you want it? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7375 Now the gods are starting to notice. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7376 He left everything but the blood. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7377 I think he’s under the desk… 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7378 The one who sits in that chair has to have pull 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7379 Well, it’s not exactly Camelot but it *is* a congenial spot... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7380 He couldn't remove it and he instantly disappeared from the C-suite. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7381 Whoso pulleth this sword from this desk is rightwise Clerk Typist III for a day. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7382 Like most of our full time positions, there’s a trial period. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7383 Possible budget slicing ? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7384 You have chosen poorly. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7385 Yup, those who live by the sword .... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7386 It's the last step to making partner. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7387 That's one hell of a letter opener. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7388 I know this is Stone's office .... but I don't get the symbolism. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7389 My secretary’s husband is the old school paranoid jealous type. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7390 If you can pull that sword out Shorty, you could make something of yourself! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7391 Whoever manages to pull the sword out of the desk will get the corner office. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7392 The boss is out until he can find a round table. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7393 Hope you ate your Wheaties. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7394 He handed in his cloak and hasn't returned 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7395 Whoever pulls it out gets the office and a seat at the round table in the break room. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7396 You'll really need to leverage your assets. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7397 In case your want to leave a message when he's out. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7398 I reckon he’s in the padded room. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7399 Some swords just defy convention. Their just mightier. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7400 Our plan of succession is very traditional. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7401 I've heard your new boss is a fan of grand gestures. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7402 We need a CEO who will be a very strong leader. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7403 It's the latest in desk excessories. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7404 Legend has it that if you free the sword from the desk, you get to run the company. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7405 Your new desk's from the wood of an oak in Sherwood Forest. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7406 I thought you said you wanted a knight watchman to be on duty after you left for the day. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7407 DO OR DIE 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7408 IT has instituted a more stringent internet security protocol. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7409 Saddle up partners! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7410 Legend has it that one who pulls it out becomes CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7411 It’s the only way we can take back the Presidency. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7412 It’s either a litmus test or a warning. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7413 When the "traditional" executive succession policy got written into the by-laws, it was widely regarded as a joke, but then Mr. Maxwell got gored by that unicorn, so here we are. Go ahead and try to pull it out of the desk -- I've tried and I can't. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7414 Looks like he is still on his lunch break........... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7415 So anyway, after the lawsuit we just decided to have it put back in. My advice is to try to ignore it. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7416 Have you seen the new table in the conference room? Round. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7417 Right. The office will be yours. But if you fail, you buy everyone coffee until the next new hire tries and fails. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7418 Ignore the sword. Last guy just couldn't. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7419 Careful, if you pull it out you become CEO and have to go before the Senate Committee's ongoing investigation. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7420 What does it mean? It means a messed-up promotion process, is what it means. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7421 Whosoever pulleth out this sword shall rightwise be know as assistant manager of internet sales! 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7422 That desk was just two days away from retirement. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7423 The last consultant that we hired was more traditional, but the 360 reviews didn't cut it. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7424 So this interview is a bit unusual. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7425 His sword fell upon him. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7426 I told him not to challenge Zorro. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7427 The boss left. Now the new boss will have to deal with Excalibur. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7428 So far, getting rid of the occupant of the office has proved simpler than pulling out the sword 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7429 The boss is as hard as a rock, but a sward in his desk is a bit much. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7430 Mr. Aurthur will see you know. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7431 HR is interviewing Arthurs tomorrow. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7432 Here's your last challenge to get the job: pull the sword and the desk will be yours. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7433 Donald’s office, Trump Tower: before he pulled out the sword. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7434 I guess she decided the iron fist wasn't cutting it. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7435 The job title is technically Chief Excalibur Officer. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7436 If you remove the sword, you may have to take over his job and sacrifice your wife. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7437 I see Artie's trying to top that Excalibur stunt again. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7438 It's the final test to become CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7439 Congrats on your promotion, Arthur. Let's hope the Board will use modern methods of demotion and dismissal. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7440 If you can pull it out, the job is yours. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7441 Even without the stone, he still disappeared. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7442 If you can't pull it out, it means you're being investigated by the feds in the Southern District of New York. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7443 Knights in the conference room next. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7444 Here is the final part of your interview. Now let's see if you can pull that sucker out of the desktop. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7445 Glad to see Art leaving his work at the office. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7446 I think Arthur is taking the promotion a little too seriously. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7447 This is how we are going to determine the 2020 Presidential Election - King Arthur Style. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7448 Whoever pulls it out gets to be CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7449 If he only had a pen... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7450 HR feels we don't need a head hunter 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7451 If you pull it out you get a key to the executive washroom. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7452 The first one to pull it out is CEO 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7453 As I mentioned, the boss is a "hip and thigh" guy. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7454 Apparently it was in the Whitehouse for decades. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7455 If you can’t pull it out... you get the job. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7456 Darn, where did I put the password for this thing again? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7457 So that's what he meant by "Only one will get this promotion" 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7458 Maybe we should call Arthur in IT... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7459 Pulleth out this sword and the promotion is yours... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7460 No one's been able to pull it out since Arthur got fired. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7461 Last step of your interview—-Legend has it that any applicant who can pull the sword from the desk will be the true CEO of the firm. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7462 Sarah Gilbert was really pissed at Roseanne!! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7463 He likes to tell people to meet him at his club. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7464 Arthur’s on sabbatical 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7465 The position is interim until destiny reveals the rightful CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7466 The last guy had a hell of time trying to use that fancy letter opener. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7467 Merlin was here. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7468 This symbolizes the time they decided to start cutting expenses from the top down. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7469 Well, it's no "strange women lying in ponds, distributing swords...", but it will have to do. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7470 And he who draweth the sword Excaliber from the CEO's desk shall, by the grace of God, become the next chairman of the Fed. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7471 Behold! The Sword of Power! Forged when LinkedIn was young! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7472 Only those who are worthy shall receive a promotion 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7473 We have what you call "Arthurian" promotions here... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7474 Mid-12th-century modern, I believe. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7475 Pull the sword and be automatically promoted from your seemingly endless internship. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7476 Be like a Ninja, leave no trace behind. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7477 The last applicant that tried to pull it out got a hell of a hernia_. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7478 Maybe hiding under the desk wasn't such a good idea. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7479 Did you see that coming? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7480 I warned him never to nap under his desk when the Renaissance Faire is in town. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7481 The building's only Authur failed last week 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7482 He uses that for a back scratcher. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7483 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise our next CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7484 It is said that whosoever draws it out shall become manager of the tri-state region. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7485 I heard whoever pulls it out gets early retirement... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7486 Who ever can pull it out becomes the new CEO of Lancelot Inc. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7487 This is the interview. Good luck, Sir. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7488 Chance to move up! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7489 Yeah, it’s an awesome sundial until you get your shadow in it... but sometimes I put the phone’s shadow in it like “stab, stab, stop ringing” 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7490 Oh, the old see-who-can-pull-Excaliber-out-of-the-desk trick to get a promotion 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7491 I think she will make a great CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7492 Well, it will save a lot of executive recruiting costs... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7493 tweet king Arthur. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7494 Looks like our Board of Directors really believes those King Arthur stories. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7495 Legend has it, if you can remove it, the corner office is yours. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7496 At night he moonlights on the set of "Once Upon a Time" 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7497 This is Excelibur, the Sword in the Grindstone. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7498 He may be king but not Arthur. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7499 I should have known it would not be easy getting a promotion with a company named Excaliber! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7500 We've been assured that whoever can pull the sword from the desk will be an absolutely legendary CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7501 If you pull it out of the desk you're the next CEO. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7502 He who pulleth the sword from the desk receives 30 years to life for securities fraud. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7503 Well, we know it’s not the sword of Gryffindor 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7504 He's no longer with us. Left late one Friday afternoon, mumbling something about a round table. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7505 Whoever removes the sword is given a place on the president's cabinet. So far, no takers. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7506 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this bland oak desk is rightwise CEO. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7507 He said it's for his online Shakespeare course. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7508 Be careful what you pull out, you may have to run it! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7509 Only the true CEO can remove the sword 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7510 Welcome to Camelot. HR said you were the right hire for the job. Time to prove it. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7511 The new corporate advancement requirements have and Olde Tyme feel. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7512 Will he be still in the risk-pool for our underwriting department? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7513 First, Brexit. Now, this... 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7514 I had thought they wanted us to come in here and SORT it out. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7515 Finalists interview with the Lady in the Lake. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7516 I know he thinks he’s Il Duce, but King Arthur too? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7517 'Because the Iron Fist was too heavy for the desk." 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7518 Its not just about pulling the sword out , Mr Harris ... You need to convince us you can prevent it falling if we offer you the job... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7519 I like the old way of letting the Board pick the next CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7520 Yeah, we’re pretty sure his successor won’t be from current management. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7521 They say the guy who put it there is a real marketing wizard. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7522 Whoever pulls the sword will be the head of the round table. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7523 I'll get the Law Offices of Arthur & Arthur on the phone. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7524 It's our new CEO selection process. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7525 They certainly dress up the stones these days. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7526 Now I know why we have a round table in the boardroom. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7527 I told you he was no Arthur. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7528 That's an interesting alternative to the Electoral College. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7529 The company wanted a Sir Galahad. We wound up instead with a Sir Hadagal. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7530 Legend has it that whoever pulls the sword from the desk is the true leader of this company 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7531 Just before he vanished I heard this deep voice : “I will smite thee with a swift sword”. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7532 He left behind a proud legacy, and also his sword, which no one has managed to dislodge from his desk. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7533 We’re on our third search committee for this one. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7534 I thought the Excaliber exhibit started next week? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7535 Welcome to Excalibur Enterprises. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7536 That is valyrian steel! The board is coming. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7537 Arthur got a kingdom, I'd settle for Governors Island. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7538 They'll consider this in your annual performance evaluation, you know. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7539 The 'burn' office isn't nearly as inviting. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7540 Whoso Pulleth Out the Sword of the Desk, is Rightwise Chairman and CEO of the Conpany and All Subsidiaries. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7541 Arthur, you were destined for this job. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7542 I call on your power, says Excalibur. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7543 Maybe it worked for kings, but it just doesn't seem like a great way to identify acumen in sales management. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7544 Merlin in accounting says this has something to do with who gets the promotion. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7545 It appears the threat of draconian budget cuts was literal. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7546 The board thought this would be the best way to determine who the next CEO should be. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7547 I asked the boss for some more challenging work. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7548 I don't know. It's probably just symbolic, but scooting in might be kind of dangerous. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7549 He said, to save the patriarchy just stroke the sword. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7550 We better go ahead a order a round conference table while we're waiting. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7551 Alright boy, let’s have the miracle 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7552 This is one of our more popular lines of distressed furniture for those accused of sexual assault. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7553 ...so you’re telling me this is the only tamper proof way to ensure only the worthy take office? and the damaged Resolute ? 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7554 It barely missed Damocles. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7555 Guess management was really serious about slashing prices. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7556 You'll be sharing office space with the knight shift. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7557 WHEN I SAID CONFIRM THAT EVERYONE HAS A TAX CUT, THAT DOES NOT MEAN I WANTED YOU TO BECOME A ABANDON THE CORPERATE BOSHIDO CODE TO BECOME A WANDERING SWORDSMAN AND CUT EVERYONES TAXES WITH A KATANA BLADE GEROLD !!! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7558 Seriously.Why bother? Even an AK-47 would be retro. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7559 A woman actually got it out, so back to the drawing board. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7560 Thank goodness we laid Damocles off. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7561 We're trying to simplify this CEO search. If can pull it out, the job is yours. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7562 Check out this cool desk, I think it was Bill Clinton's 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7563 Looks like his out of office. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7564 Though we didn't believe him, Arthur told us several times, 'this is what will happen if my kids have no interest in taking over the company.' 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7565 yup, and YOU'll lead the round table discussions. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7566 Perhaps he's gone to find Arthur 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7567 Is that a parking brake I see before me? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7568 Technically, legal no longer allows trail by combat, but this sword still entitles you to attractive stock options. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7569 How does he keep the desktop so clean and white in a world possessed by the human mind? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7570 And here yet we await the true ruler of Mergers and Acquisitions. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7571 Don in Marketing says if you pull out the sword, you won't get the ax. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7572 Legend says whomever pulleth is destined to provide Senate testimony. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7573 Does this mean the meeting was adjourned? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7574 Our CEO's son Arthur loves to play with swords so much. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7575 I've been trying to figure out how pull it out." "You have five kids, that much is obvious. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7576 It’s called Excalibur, and the person who can pull it out gets to be the next vice-president. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7577 And he was barely in England a week. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7578 I didn't say that The Arthur Company Executive Training Program would be easy. I said it was simple. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7579 Arthur, I think you should pull it. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7580 Does that mean we are about to sleep with the sword fishes? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7581 And then she flew up into the air, twirled around theee times, and vaporized. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7582 As you can see, it’s a great company but you will be expected to work some knights 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7583 Here we have the magicians assistant’s office 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7584 They say it can only be withdrawn by the rightful President. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7585 Beware Arthur, it's the boss's idea of weeding out anyone after his job. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7586 That's a really serious wrong number 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7587 We’re not just looking for CPAs, Brad – we’re looking for legends. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7588 When the old CEO retired, HR came up with a new succession plan... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7589 And here's Gene's office, um, that's for his King Arthur fetish, not S&M--or magic. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7590 I should have been more careful when I read the job description. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7591 I guess we still haven’t found the new IT guy. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7592 Yesterday he wanted a round table! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7593 We're never taking Bob to Medieval Times again. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7594 How do you feel about working the knight shift? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7595 Most people don’t know how budget cuts are really made. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7596 Do you still have King Arthur’s resume? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7597 There's Damacles' sword! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7598 They got him where it hurts this time. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7599 Apparently Arthur is late today ! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7600 I'm not sure I want to pull it out. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7601 Looks like Damocles’ promotion didn’t work out. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7602 Arthur's been lying to us all this time. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7603 I think the boss has a point. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7604 Your choice from the power trinity 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7605 Boss just finished 'The Once and Future King.' I'll go first. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7606 Well, it does reduce the interview process significantly. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7607 He thought it was a stapler. That was his downfall. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7608 Shouldn’t the desk be round? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7609 Your resumé is terrible, but HR insists that all candidates give this baby a tug. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7610 We've spent a fortune of desks since Damocles retired. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7611 Whoever can pull it out gets to host “The Apprentice.” 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7612 I’m surprised the ax he took to expenses included himself 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7613 Excaliburton 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7614 I hope Dennis wasn't sleeping under the desk again. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7615 Truth is... the sword's not in there very deep. It's just that nobody wants to pull it out anymore 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7616 Another kid is going to try this afternoon. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7617 Remove the sword and the office is yours 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7618 His son didn't want the job. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7619 I know it’s strange Arthur, but they say whoever can pull the sword out gets the job. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7620 Amidst all the scandal, the board was going to appoint a female executive. Ultimately, they decided the Camelot method was a more fair and impartial process. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7621 If you pull it out, they let you be CEO. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7622 Tell Art he's taking it too far... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7623 Been there since the Kennedy administration. Pull it out and the job is yours. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7624 According to HR whoever can remove the sword from the desk will be our next CEO 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7625 Word from upstairs is that this hiring freeze may last a while. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7626 Merlin Headhunting recommended this approach. Kind of old school, if you ask me. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7627 The promotion policy is a little unique. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7628 It was a literal downsizing. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7629 This is the final step in selecting a new CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7630 The guy who is able to pull it out is going to be the next CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7631 He who can remove this sword will be the new chairperson of the company 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7632 I forgot that Baxter isn't here. It's Free Scabbard Day at the ballpark. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7633 Anyone who can remove this sword from the desk will take their rightly place as our new leader! If anyone can remove this sword from the desk top they will take their righly place as or leader! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7634 So when he said he had a headhunter after him... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7635 Now about your promo... well I see the HR Department is at it again. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7636 It’s a simple test, really... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7637 Sword of Excalibur? I thought he said he had proficiency with Word and Excel. That's the last time we outsource from the company's British branch. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7638 You’ll be handling all the mail from North Korea. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7639 Pulling a sword from a desk is no way to choose a CEO, but it doesn't give you a Donald Trump 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7640 His way of saying, "fire me if you will." 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7641 This is where we house our medieval crimes division. Dan is out investigating a rouge knight right now. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7642 I know you've only been here a week Arthur but this was too good to pass up. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7643 I guess this explains why he came to work yesterday dressed as King Arthur. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7644 Arthur, why don't you give it a tug. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7645 The sword is called LexusNexuscaliber, and whoso pulleth it from the desk is rightwise born a fully indemnified senior partner. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7646 Yeah, whoever pulls the sword gets chairmanship but Lady of the Lake Corp has better stock options. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7647 Maybe the position wasn’t a good fit for him after all. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7648 Whoever pulls the sword out will restore Enron to its former glory. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7649 I see we have a new method of naming out CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7650 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise a paid intern. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7651 Just pull it out and a mind numbingly dull job with terrible benefits and absolutely no future is all yours. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7652 Your predecessor, Sir Licksalot, failed this simple test, and our Code of Conduct course. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7653 Looks like old Sam has staked out a new future. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7654 Get him to try something new and it always ends up being a literalism. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7655 Poor Art, looks like the Excalibur account isn't going well. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7656 Funny way to pick a new CEO. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7657 We're trying to phase-in standing desks. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7658 But are you worthy of promotion? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7659 If you pull it out, you get to take one sick day as a vacation day. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7660 Whoever gets it out of there gets a half day off. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7661 Arthur doesn’t buy into online trolling. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7662 Give it a try. Then after lunch we'll finish up the remaining six team interviews 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7663 This stand-up desk thing is getting out of hand. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7664 Everything in the office was revamped: new desk, new chair, new writing utensil. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7665 Stoned and bored , Arthur had too much time on his hands at work. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7666 You pull I'll watch. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7667 Oh, and that's a little challenge left by your predecessor 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7668 Our firm has its own test to determine who makes partner. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7669 We'll be sure to requisition a new desk for with minimum of four blades. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7670 Pull that out and you get to be CEO! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7671 Welcome to the office. The last man to hold you job was a real king. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7672 The CEO position is open to anyone who can pull the sword from the desk. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7673 David's gone... Whoso pulleth out this sword of this stone and anvil is right-wise head of the agile transformation 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7674 It cuts down on the expense of vetting CEO candidates. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7675 Well, George said he was going to stick it too them ... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7676 I think that's the boss's way of saying that our plan has a one in ten thousand chance of success. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7677 the new facts are the new Fax 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7678 Our CEO, our king: Arthur 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7679 If you ask me, HR's hiring procedures are getting kind of kooky. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7680 Pull this off and you're bound to be the new CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7681 If you can pull it out, you’re the Director of Marketing. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7682 A desk, thought to be from King Arthur's study. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7683 The one who is able to remove the blade can sit in that chair. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7684 Man, the new corporate recruiter really takes his job seriously. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7685 I heard of getting axed, but this is a bit ridiculous. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7686 If you can remove the sword from the desk, the company is all yours. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7687 Now that's a resolute desk! 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7688 Quick! The boss said to call King Richard's Fix-It Company. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7689 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise middle manager born of all New England corporate accounts. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7690 Just another day at the office 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7691 It's pretty simple. Once the all the sweating and straining and digging-in-of-heels is over, they get sent on their way with the very nice lunch, anyway. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7692 Before his anger management course, that would have been me 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7693 “Chainsaw? Acetylene torch? Maintenance? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7694 Suss Cunts, Summer Flake, Dianas, Scratch Match, Eat-Man at The Tote, Friday 8th June 2018 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7695 we believe in challenging job interviews. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7696 If that's what you had to do to get Jenkins away from his computer, that's what you had to do 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7697 Legend says, he who removes the sword gets the promotion. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7698 Yes, it's true. He who pulls the sword out of the stone will be hired. We're corporate but capricious. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7699 I see the White Knight left his out of office notice. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7700 We're finding that some previous employees are leaving more aggressive comments these days. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7701 PULL THE SWORD FROM THE DESK, AND THEY CROWN YOU C.E.O. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7702 They tried, but they couldn't get it into his heart. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7703 that's Arthur's desk, our oldest employee. he got mad when his round table was replaced and nobody has been able to lift the sword ever since. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7704 No, the position is still open. HR dept. is adamant. They insist that the qualifying candidate should be able to pull the sword out. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7705 Who will extract it will be the new Director. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7706 There was something about him I couldn't pin down. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7707 The poor guy dove under his desk when his pen went dry. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7708 The last guy just wasn't cut out for the job. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7709 Whosoever draweth forth this sword will be rightful king of Wall Street. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7710 Mr. Trump couldn't pull it out either... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7711 It's quite the entrance exam for a junior vice president position. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7712 Well, genius, do you still think a `non-compete clause' would seem harsh? 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7713 And that's why he is the boss 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7714 Whoever pulls it out gets to sit in the chair. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7715 It looks like Jim might have fallen on his own sword after all, but there is so little blood it makes me wonder. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7716 Tom recently got into genealogy; he thinks he’s some sort of decendant of a middeval king. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7717 Audiences and readers loved "Sword in the Stone," so we're hoping for another hit. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7718 I'm afraid this is your severance package 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7719 Not too many candidates trying for CEO since we announced sexual harassment background checks. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7720 Jeez, can't we just vote for a new CEO without all this drama? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7721 Do you think he is sending us a message? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7722 I've heard that our Board takes a dim view of our succession planning. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7723 But did he really have to hire a temp named Merlin just for this? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7724 Uh, hey Arthur, come check this out... 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7725 Might as well just wait for the lowly janitor's son. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7726 Mr Damocles, are you here? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7727 HR says only the true CEO will be able to remove it. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7728 Merlin our management consultant suggested this approach to find our next CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7729 It's more dramatic than a butter knife, don't you think? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7730 We'll have to write a new policy about sword juggling. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7731 Clean up the boss's desk, will you, Arthur? 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7732 He who draws the sword shall be our next Digital Prophet 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7733 What do you think -- are you executive caliber? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7734 He who can pull out the sword gets the promotion. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7735 It’s the last season, I think he’ll be back. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7736 Whoever can extract Excalibur from the desk will be King, CEO and an Avenger. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7737 Staff training is on Tuesdays, bring your own ink. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7738 This is the final test in the interview process, and if you can draw that sword from the desk then your chances of getting this job really go way, way up. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7739 On the upside, if you do pulleth it from the desk, you will be rightwise Head of Accounting. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7740 I'm not touching that thing. Let them use a headhunter like every other corporation 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7741 As our new corporate counsel, you'll find it useful for splitting hairs. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7742 I guess the buck stops there? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7743 We didn't want to ruin the veneer of this executive desk with a gaping hole. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7744 Our executive search tactics are positively medieval 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7745 Looks like the performance review has been delayed. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7746 The last guy walked out when we replaced his table. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7747 He must of hid under the table. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7748 Well, until King Arthur show up, just work around it. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7749 There's an Arthur Garfinkel working in the mail room. I'll see if he's available for tomorrow's board meeting. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7750 When is Arthur coming back? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7751 Only he who dost wrest the sword from the desk is the rightful heir to the corner office. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7752 Arthur was tired of Camelot, so he decided to give middle management a try. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7753 Pete, you should’ve stopped slashing prices while you were ahead. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7754 The next CEO is gonna slay. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7755 We’ve decided to simplify our interview process. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7756 Hit the gym, baby, because this is the only way you're getting this job, unless you have any better ideas. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7757 I tried pulling it out and nothing happened; you try. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7758 Please remove the sword to complete the final stage of the interview 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7759 Legend has it that whoever pulls the sword gets to be CEO for life. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7760 Either you pull it out or we're going with an outside hire. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7761 Who needs an executive when you've got Excalibur? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7762 Mr. Arthur, was it? Well as you can see you have your work cut out for you. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7763 I understand that the next CEO is anyone who can pull the sword out of the table. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7764 ... and he who removes it shall become CFO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7765 That would explain why this office has been vacant for so long. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7766 I think we should go get Arthur, he'll know what to do. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7767 This is our succession plan? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7768 Well, do you have a better idea of finding our next CEO? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7769 I'll joust you for it. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7770 Our Middle Ages Manager position has some great perks for the right candidate, including advancement potential to the Renaissance Department. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7771 Yes, Billy Jean, Don and Larry all had this office once. Why? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7772 All failed so fat General Kelly so lets allow Bernie a pull 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7773 Shareholders approved the Board’s prophesy proposal: “Pull Excalibur from the desk and one is named Chief Exec.” 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7774 He who pulls the sword is CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7775 Welcome aboard. Your ability to reach the help desk is predicated on your ability to remove the sword. Good luck. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7776 He would always hide under the desk during mandatory lice checks. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7777 You sure did slash that text. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7778 It'a extra calibur for you if you can pull it out. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7779 Only the one true King will get paid on time. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7780 Here's your new office Artie. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7781 Legend has it that only the true CEO of this midsized industrial cleaning products company will be able to pull the sword from the desk 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7782 We'll see if you're the right person for the job. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7783 Whomever draws this sword from the desk shall be the next White House Chief of Staff. There haven't been many takers lately. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7784 I know it’s a nice office Frank, but I advise you not to try. Gary who was in the cubicle next to me gave it a shot last Tuesday and now he works in the mail room. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7785 I hear whoever can pull it out gets the corner office. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7786 Is this the interview? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7787 This is getting predictable 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7788 Jim's in the Samaritan training program 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7789 He got sword and quit. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7790 He is one stone cold executive! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7791 Well, Arthur, you could be just the man to pull Excalibur from the stone cold heart of Capitalism, 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7792 He's gone to search the treasury for dragons again 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7793 The nigh-shift can be difficult alone. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7794 Phil decided that only the pure of heart may attend his Tuesday roundtable. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7795 He forgot it.." "Yes, yes he did.. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7796 This is your new office. As we discussed, you can expect heavy correspondence. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7797 This is how the Board of Directors chose to select the next CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7798 Niles is preparing himself to embrace change, take risks, and disrupt the company. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7799 I thought the meeting was at the round table. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7800 God will ordain our next Head of Accounting. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7801 He who pulleth the mighty sword Excalibur from the formica shall chooseth the place from whence we ordereth lunch. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7802 It looks like Arthur may have abdicated his leadership responsibilities just when we have to fight off this hostile takeover attempt from the Merlin Corporation . 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7803 If I knew the difference between smite and smote, I'd pull it out. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7804 If you can pull the sword out of the desk we will confirm you as our new CEO 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7805 Merlin, the General Manager, asked me to show you your new office. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7806 The chief couldn’t decide on a successor, so he left this behind. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7807 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise king of Human Resources. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7808 Our Type A+ performance appraisal system. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7809 He prefers to run the company in an Arthurian manner. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7810 The Board is trying something new for our executive search... 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7811 Maybe cutting the desk in half wasn’t a good way to resolve which one of us gets the job. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7812 Don’t worry, we all think you look a lot more like a bastard son of the CEO than the last guy. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7813 They say whoever can remove the sword, gets the promotion. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7814 Gotta love his rapier business style. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7815 Lots of people say they can defeat Trump...but we have a little test. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7816 Whoever can remove the sword gets a window view. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7817 I told you Arthur King won't leave quietly. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7818 King Arthur played by Prince Harry. The Lady of the Lake played by Meghan Markle. Virtual parley is the order of the day. The Roundtable is of no relevance anymore. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7819 Good thing we were standing over here and not on the middle of the desk. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7820 They say only the one true principal shareholder can pull the letter opener from the executive desk. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7821 I knew it was a mistake to float that "Anti-Sword Violence" legislation. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7822 Excalibur Inc needs to rethink it's brand. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7823 Who ever pulls it out gets to be KING ART.... Director 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7824 Can you page King Arthur for me? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7825 This isn't really what I meant by "creative destruction" 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7826 Whoso pulleth out this sword gets the office. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7827 If you can pull it out of the desk, you're the next CEO. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7828 It has been extremely difficult to fill this office's Sales position. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7829 Damocles! Not again! Go get Sigmund! Nothung’s back. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7830 When Accounting called me Exceliber, I assumed it was joke. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7831 I'm glad we got our jobs here before the new hiring criterion kicked in. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7832 I guess the CFO denied Arthur’s request for a round table. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7833 Your resume looked good Mr. Arthur, I just need you to give that a tug 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7834 I'm beginning to think Arthur isn't the rightful VP of Accounts Receivable. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7835 Wait, this bank has a substantial penalty for early withdrawal." 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7836 Oops. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7837 His ex must have unlocked level 9. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7838 Go ahead, give it a pull. I hear it comes with a beach house and a supoena. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7839 Arthur was fired yesterday, I guess he’s upset, but I understand. He was pretty stoned. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7840 Pull the sword out and you’re our new CEO. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7841 And, as you can see, we hired a very sharp sword to run our HR department. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7842 We have a Sword of Damocles just before the quarterly earnings report. Would it be insider trading if we dump all of our stock now? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7843 The new CEO is named Arthur. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7844 Here's the deal: you're CEO if you can pull it, but you'll also have to copulate with your sister. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7845 He said he wanted to quit with pride. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7846 It's the replacement Management Fad: 'Management By Slogan' was under-performing. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7847 And this will be your office, and you can see by the desk just what we expect from our employees. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7848 He came, he saw, he left. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7849 They say whoever can pull it out will be his next Chief of Staff. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7850 Nobody wants anvils anymore. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7851 First one who can remove the sword will be named CEO. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7852 She was originally commissioned for the Oval but Don was insecure about the pink and purple sparkly flowing mane. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7853 The last one to pull it out was Harvey Weistein 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7854 Not for our problems. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7855 The hunt of the old, white male. The evaluation of our souls. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7856 Instead of pushing for a promotion at this company, you have to pull. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7857 They say only the true head of mergers and acquisitions will be able to remove it 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7858 It’s the new multipurpose password! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7859 The excalibur will choose the executive. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7860 Yes, Arthur, he who pulls the sword Expenditure from this desk will found a great accounting firm that will someday be brought down by scandal. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7861 Yeah, we thought we were going to be able to fill the position with Arthur but he didn't pass the drug test. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7862 ...so yea, if you're able to draw the sword from the CEO's desk you'll qualify for a better healthcare plan. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7863 Pull out the sword and you become CEO 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7864 This performance based interviewing is getting rediculous. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7865 ... so we feel the ideal candidate should be the rightful heir to the Accounts Receivable kingdom. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7866 Our criterion for promotion is pretty straightforward. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7867 One day that sword will be withdrawn from that desk by the rightful CEO and there will be rejoicing throughout the cubicles. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7868 The CEO search committee is taking an old approach. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7869 He who pulleth the sword from the desk shall forever be CEO , so sayeth the company Oracle! 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7870 Whoever can pull it out gets to be the new CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7871 It is written that whoever can remove the sword from the desk gets the corner office. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7872 This is the final step in our CEO search 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7873 We can’t let Arthur come here. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7874 According to legend, only someone with the purest character and inner strength can pull the enchanted sword from the desk and claim the position of CEO 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7875 Many people don’t appreciate the environmental impacts of rainbow excrement ... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7876 It's an upload of the latest hacking device. Apparently, only our social engineer can activate it. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7877 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise Division Manager. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7878 Legend has it that whoever can remove the sword gets appointed District Manager. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7879 Her is your office, welcome to Damocles investments. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7880 ...And then he said 'look at me, I am the branch manager now.' 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7881 He is still stuck on the accomplishment's from the last quarter...millennial 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7882 Whoso pulleth out this sword, is destined to a 4% boost in workplace morale. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7883 Most employers only want high-caliber prospects. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7884 I heard that whoever pulls it out gets keys to the executive bathroom. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7885 CEO Merlin's last words were 'Take this sword and shove it.' 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7886 Mr. Bezos says whoever pulls it gets Amazon HQ2. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7887 No interview questions. Just pull out the sword and you get the job. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7888 The boss says whoso pulleth it out will win Salesman of the Month. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7889 If you can remove the sword from the desk, you'll be the new CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7890 They were all out of pens. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7891 Frank, I was just wondering if this new guy you hired named Lance is also called 'Sir'? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7892 Give it a try, the office goes to whoever can pull out the sword. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7893 He’s not qualified to be a CEO either. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7894 He just mythed making partner. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7895 Looks like a third rewrite for our Excalibur script. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7896 Welcome to Damocles, Excalibur, D'Artagnan, LLP 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7897 It will take a man of courage, virtue and maybe some WD-40. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7898 The one who can pull the sword out will be the next CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7899 The pen might be mightier than the sword... but the sword is definitely mightier than the desk. And look...all I have to do is turn the light off, and darkness is mightier than all of it. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7900 The Board requires one last task to prove you are truly worthy to lead us. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7901 Let’s put it this way, it’s not always what you know... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7902 If you don’t cut it,we do. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7903 Looks like Arthur is the next CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7904 L train. Canarsie. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7905 Arty left his resignation on the desk after learning the office wouldn't pay for a round table 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7906 May 28, 2018 Cartoon Caption "It's better up there than behind you..." 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7907 He's an "ideas" man 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7908 They say whoever pulls the sword out becomes the next boss. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7909 That painting was a gift from his mom. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7910 Well they always said the sword is mightier than the pen. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7911 We had it installed for our staff accountant, Morty D'Arthur. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7912 Wow! The desk did not even flinch. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7913 It's all that's left of Kennedy's Camelot. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7914 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise CEO born. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7915 He's been reading John Morris again.. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7916 Funny story: the IT guy couldn't read the first three letters of 'password' in our setup instructions. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7917 Amazing such a big opener. That is it you are getting too much mail. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7918 There is little doubt that improvement is necessary. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7919 Whoso pulleth out this sword is the rightwise CEO of Carpetland! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7920 We're very 'old-school' about leadership succession plans here. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7921 It came with the desk and he can't get it out. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7922 If you can pull it out, you move into this office 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7923 I’m afraid he’s gone nuts 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7924 Tell your broker to short Camelot Corporation. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7925 Everybody's tried. But we're anti-heroes around here. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7926 He was fired for excessive displays of masculinity. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7927 You're one step away from getting axed. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7928 I guess someone found a way around the desk sharing policy. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7929 This is the office of Stephen King, author. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7930 Apparently whosoever pulleth the sword out of this desk gets their 401(k) contributions matched at 100% and a dedicated parking space 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7931 Our succession system relies on a firm grasp of British historical tradition 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7932 Well, you said your name was Arthur. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7933 Well at least it landed on the front of his desk and not in the back. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7934 Our next CEO will be the one who pulls the sword from the desk. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7935 When they delivered the round conference table, they threw this in for free. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7936 "I specifically told the the contractor the desk had to be round." - King Arthur 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7937 The man who can successfully remove this sword from this desk, will become CEO of this corporation. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7938 Mr. President was sure that the leaker was under the desk. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7939 Whosoever removeth the sword shall occupy the seat of power. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7940 So whoever is able to withdraw the sword gets to be CEO? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7941 I should've went with the stainless steel model. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7942 If you can remove the sword, the office is yours... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7943 Pull it out on your first try and you become CEO! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7944 They say whoever pulls it out will be the next equity partner. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7945 I'm thinking round table for the conference room. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7946 The interview process includes the Lancelot. Only the right person gets the position. Good luck. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7947 There's plenty of room for upward nobility. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7948 True, the sword is mightier than the desk 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7949 This office belongs to our Holy Grail” 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7950 The tales they could tell if they could talk " "Our host must have spent a pretty penny to get to bag all these 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7951 I see why it's called the Siege Perilous! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7952 No impeachment means no impeachment! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7953 Interesting way of choosing a CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7954 According to the memo from the Board, the first candidate who can extract that sword will be our next CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7955 The King Arthur Method is all the rage in hiring CEOs these days. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7956 Unfortunately Simmons was engaging in some clandestine hanky panky at the time. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7957 It's easier for people to get past my height when I put my sword on display. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7958 Ya, I thought our last CEO could have just left you a note 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7959 ‚So what do you think Mike do you have an Arthur in you?‘ 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7960 We need to tell him that all these round table meetings are counter productive. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7961 Damocles is never here when you need him. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7962 Welcome Arthur to your new office. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7963 Pull it out and you get to lead a group from marketing in a quest for the Holy Sale. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7964 Whosoever shall draw forth the sword, we'll need the annual shareholder report by next Tuesday. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7965 HR is calling it 'Arthurian Action.' 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7966 "He who pulleth the sword Excalibur from the granite desk" ...blah blah blah, yadda-yadda....so...wanna give it a try? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7967 We are moving to an ex-caliber system. Aptitude and qualifications are no longer required to be President, you simply have to pull the sword from the desk. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7968 He"s at the gym ,working on his biceps. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7969 We told him this issue wasn’t worth falling on his sword. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7970 So his title is Chief Excalibur Officer? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7971 He has a meeting with the trustees of the round table. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7972 It's a new incentive program to retain female talent...whoever removes the sword from the desk gets 12 weeks paid maternity leave. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
7973 Whosoever shall draw the sword from the desktop, thereby logs in to the laptop. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7974 I don’t want to pull it out. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7975 Damn, I thought you said I had to pull it out of a rock not falling stock to be king 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7976 Will I really be CEO if I pull the sword out of the desk? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7977 As he left he said, "Forget hiring a headhunter." Then he thrust this sword through the top of his desk. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7978 Sorry, Excalidocious has no scabbard. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7979 OK. So where's Arthur? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7980 Looking for a round table. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7981 You think boss is hiding something? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7982 Mr. Pendragon left it for the new CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7983 Arthur refuses to let us upgrade his desk. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7984 I see Roseanne was here and left A calling Blade Chaps! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7985 Arthur from training if legend follows. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7986 Accepting the only way of getting a promotion, Jack agreed to give the infamous "sword in the desk" a tug. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7987 Weird. I was going to fall on it. What else can go wrong? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7988 Apparently, Zorro doesn't have the patience to run a bulk promotional item business. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7989 Dead Lesbian Syndrom Strikes Again 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7990 Whoever pulls the sword out gets to clean the port-a-potties for a week. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7991 And, if you can pull the sword out of the desk, you get the job. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7992 Is this a sign that we shouldn't have come to snoop in her office? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7993 Guess the new guy took a stab at the latest project. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7994 He whoeth remove the sword becomest the boss. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7995 Whoever can remove the sword from the desk, gets to be president. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
7996 He’ll be remembered as legendary 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7997 What can you do for us that other candidates can't? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7998 Your predecessor just couldn't pull it off. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
7999 If you can release it,all his Facebook accounts are yours 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8000 i got the desk for half price cuz there's a sword stuck in it 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8001 He never said that he'd die before he fired everyone else. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8002 The last guy didn’t take the firing so well... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8003 I just want any visiting Visigoths to feel at home. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8004 If you withdraw the sword, you will be our new CEO. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
8005 Our CEO succession plan is a true test of strength. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8006 If you can pull the sword out of the desk, you get to be CEO! 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
8007 The fork must have run away with the spoon 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8008 I wonder if Peters will get a 40 percent pay cut. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8009 Now we know why he ran for Prime Minister. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
8010 Your turn, Simpkins! Arthur’s next! 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
8011 Not sure why, but the name for King Author Flour was developed in this office. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8012 Get Arthur down in Accounting to remove it. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8013 Call Siegfried; tell him we need him right away. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8014 It looks like he wants to have swords with you. Perhaps a word with four letters. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8015 “The Ex CEO was high calibre. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8016 Fine, I guess I'll interview the next one. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
8017 This WeWork used to be a magic grotto. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8018 Behold ExHallibur...ton. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8019 You're actually our fourth choice, but one of the others who were up for the position have proven themselves worthy 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8020 I never saw that coming! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8021 Jon Snow hasn't fully adjusted to the corporate environment. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8022 So I pulled it out of the stone and the next thing I know it's here. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8023 Someone is taking this whole Royals thing too far! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8024 Bob's interviews are very short, but intimidating. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8025 I hear he used to work for RJR. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8026 HR isn’t crazy about this part of the interview, but we feel it’s essential 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8027 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise king of the failing New York Times 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8028 Writing the position description has been a challenge. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8029 I could've removed it easily, but I'm not a Teamster. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8030 According to company legend, he who can remove the sword shall convene the Knights of the Conference Table. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8031 We are waiting for the rightful heir to see if she can defend the company in a down market. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8032 If he didn’t like 'Hot Desking’ all he had to do was so say 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8033 Boromir quit after we upgraded to light-sabers. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8034 This is pretty much how promotions are determined here. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8035 His 95 management theses are beside the point. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8036 Is he under the desk? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8037 whosoever pulleth this sword from this desk is the rightful head of marketing 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8038 If they think that medieval method is gonna get them a great CEO, they're sadly mistaken. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8039 I can't help but wonder? What would Trump Do? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8040 We use it when we need to cut staff. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8041 Folklore has it that the last one to remove it was indicted and had to return as part of his plea deal. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8042 Just like King Arthur, whoever is able to withdraw the sword is the new CEO 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8043 OK tough guy, pull out the sword then. Anyway, what does it matter that you are the bastard child of the CEO? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8044 I agree, it is an interesting way to find a new CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8045 The high rate of CEO turnover has the board rethinking the skill set required for the job. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8046 "Okay, pulling out is not a manly thing to do, but c'mon George, it's good to be the King... give it a try". 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8047 Whoever pulls it out goes to the top of Standard & Poor’s 500 with options for stock 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8048 is this why they limited to applications to people named Arthur? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8049 Our CEO search process is depressingly medieval. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8050 Remove the sword, and be king! Of accounts payable. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8051 If you think that's silly, you should see what happens to the company scapegoat. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8052 Its not original, this vanishing act was perfected in 2008. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8053 It's a retro way to get a new CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8054 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this mahogany desk, is rightwise CEO. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
8055 I know it's a time-honored tradition for picking a leader - but do we really need to go with Merlin's idea? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8056 It's going to take more than a Board of Directors vote to replace him. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8057 I give you Execalibur. Best of luck with the new job. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8058 Some people think a pen is mightier than a sword, but I'm not so sure about that computer. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8059 I guess we are too late for a corporate buyout. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8060 And whoever pulls out the sword gets the corner window office. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8061 Would you believe it's his letter opener? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8062 He lost his pull around here. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8063 Every partner office comes with a letter opener... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8064 and for your last interview, we'd like you to walk on water. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8065 Lady of the Lake heads up HR. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8066 It doesn't take a wizard tell we need to call maintenance. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8067 Only he who pulleth out this sword is truly worthy of the corner office. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8068 Whosoever pulls it out shall be CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8069 Yup... ever since he stapled his thumb to the desk. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8070 He saw David Copperfield last night. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8071 He's been trying to get it out for years. He wants the corner office. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8072 Let's not fall for THAT crap, Marty... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8073 He's not Japanese but his desk is. Every time he feels ashamed he does Harakiri on the poor desk. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8074 This job is harder than we ever imagined. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8075 It's her way of reminding us that if we live by the sword, we'll die by the sword. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8076 I didn’t think he would be so hard to replace. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
8077 Until someone is able to pull it out we won’t have a CEO. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8078 Whosoever pulleth this sword from this desk shall be named Employee of the Month. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
8079 She said she'll be back 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8080 The outgoing CEO insists that each of the young associates have a go at pulling it out of the desk. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8081 Pull it. If it come out you get the job. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8082 It's said that whomsoever pulls the sword from the desk is the rightful president of the corporation. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
8083 Nail it, twitter-in-chief! You should know where the Constitution is. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8084 Pulling a sword within the last 5 years is also recommended. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8085 OK. I think we’ve got a name for our flour company – Excalibur Flour! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8086 Hey bob THAT is what you call a sword in a desk bobby yo bob 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8087 It’s the Board’s new idea for a succession plan. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8088 ...and that’s we’ve gone without a CEO since Arthur retired. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8089 If it looks like a sword & cuts like a sword,... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8090 This makes the search for a new CEO that much more difficult. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8091 If you can pull this sword out of the desk, you too, can become president. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8092 If you can pull it out and you become CEO. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8093 He always wanted a round table. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8094 He who pulls the sword out of the desk get the corner office. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
8095 If we pull that sword out of the desk, we can take turns being king. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8096 The real test is arranging the items ergonomically around the sword. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8097 I know this probably looks like one final test, but I should tell you that the last guy had a pirate thing. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8098 It's for the final interviews tomorrow. Jenkins thinks Cranford and Sloan needs more real men. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8099 You get used to it -- we were Damocles before Excalibur bought us out. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8100 Pull the sword out of the desk and the job is yours! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8101 It's been stuck like that since Dodd-Franks 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8102 Let's meet with Arthur, our next candidate. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8103 I didn't know he was out to lunch. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8104 We won't call you King Greg, but you can keep the sword. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8105 Better call Art in accounting. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8106 My guess is he wanted a scone, not a stone! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8107 I guess the pen isn't mightier than the sword. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8108 It’s the sword in Mr. Stone’s desk. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8109 The Lady of The Lake was having none of Arthur's crap today. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8110 And so, Arthur. There is only this one more test before you get the job of running the company. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8111 You first, Kay. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
8112 The guys at the canteen are overshooting 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
8113 Times have changed, Finch. To succeed now, all you have to do is just pull it out. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8114 Well, for one thing, you can't sit there anyway until you get it out. If you know what I mean... 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8115 When he said the solution had to do with Camelot, I thought it was his web-cam. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8116 I guess there were no clean folks in the lounge. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8117 They say that, if you pull the sword, you get to have a standing desk. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8118 England Inc. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8119 If you can pull it out, you get to be CEO. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8120 If you pull it out, you become CEO, 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8121 Wanna take a shot at being named our next CEO? 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8122 A bit more elegant than the axe. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8123 I don't care what you do with it, just don't take a sword in the bone. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8124 No ones been able to pull it out yet hence we have no CEO. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8125 At least this CEO succession process is easy to understand. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8126 'Peace Out' and he was out! 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8127 We are experiencing mid-12th-century Anglo interference in the election. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8128 Parker is done here at Anger Management Inc. I've had it with his sick jokes. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8129 Whoever can remove the sword gets to choose their own cubicle. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8130 His ex-wife is a true Legend! 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8131 I guess Arthur's gone home for the day 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8132 You've got some big shoes to fill. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8133 Looks like the work of some kind of hashmark graffiti artist,...but what’s with the sword? 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8134 We’re into voodoo hiring practices. Pull it out cleanly and you’ve got the job. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8135 Looks like another job for Good Sir Edwin from Facilities. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8136 It is told that, "Whosoever can move the lever of industry shall reign as CEO." 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8137 'Whoso pulleth this sword from this stone desk, gets the corner office.' 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8138 Our decor here is Pre-Camelotian. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8139 Once you get the job, it's useful for takeovers. The last pretender to CEO got hostile hernias. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8140 ...AND AT THAT POINT IN THE NEGOTIATION NORTH KOREA STOPPED ARGUING. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8141 The board wanted a CEO who could find the next 'holy grail', so this is what consultants came up with. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8142 You know, until just this second, I'd never really believed in the Peter Pan Principle. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8143 Remove it and become CEO. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8144 We are looking to hire a Royal A** Hole for this job. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8145 He joined a medieval reenactment group when he retired. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8146 He was hoping a White Knight would save him from the hostile takeover. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8147 If you pull it out, you will have to fall on it. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8148 Do I pull it out like King Arthur 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8149 Well, young Pendragon, Godspeed in your initial interview. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8150 He who pulls the sword from the desk shall be CEO. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8151 Only one will be worthy to be the new CEO. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8152 A clean and organized desk says a lot about a manager's style, don't you think? 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8153 They say whoso pulleth out this sword will rightwise become head of acquisitions and procurement. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8154 It’s not something I can just whip out in the office. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8155 Whosoever pulls out the sword is the rightful ruler of Accounting. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8156 Whoever removes it gets to be CEO. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8157 Yes, we've moved the furniture a bit since Damocles left. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8158 It looks like the Vegas Golden Knights have branched outside of Hockey.... 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8159 If you can’t pull it out... you get the job. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8160 Mr. Arthur said that if you pull out the sword, you'll get a pay raise. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8161 Jackson always took the "tranche desk" label too literally. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8162 Oh look, it's a sword in a desk. Better that than a gun I suppose. Man it's been a long week. Still, better than being at home. Do you like fishing? 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8163 Originally it was much bigger, round and could seat at least 12 comfortably. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8164 Get the office and it becomes the sword of Damocles. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8165 I ASSUME THIS MEANS HE WILL NOT BE BACK!! 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8166 Merlin from IT just set you up. Welcome aboard Arthur. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8167 Looks like Damocles was passed over again for promotion. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8168 You become CEO, but you also have to handle discrimination claims. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8169 That's Arthur King's nameplate. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8170 If you pull it out Merlin will make you CEO. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8171 Neither Willis Reed nor King Arthur is going to walk through that door. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8172 Damocles forgot that Fred takes lunch early on Fridays. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8173 It must have been suicide - didn't know he was so depressed . . . 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8174 And our board room has a round table. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8175 Are we electing a CEO or a King? 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8176 Whoever pulls it out gets promoted to "The True King." However--and HR was very clear about this--there's no pay raise. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8177 Wow, Jerry, the manager went on a expedition back to the 15th century, but I wonder where he is, huh, maybe back in the big bang. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8178 We just got so tired of buying pens. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8179 There's got to be a better way to hire a CFO 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8180 Perhaps you could be our once and future sales manager. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8181 As Norman and Dale came to see who got the promotion, Dale understood what had to be done. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8182 I guess there's only one way to find out who the next CEO will be 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8183 We decided to automate our HR process. Good candidates are hard to find... 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8184 Art’s gone Medieval. Call HR. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8185 Don’t try it. You’ll end up president of the United States. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8186 Someone thinks their Bonus didn't have enough zeros in it. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8187 ...and this is Cal'. Hardest working man in the company...no one has managed to yank him out of the office for drinks. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8188 If you can take it out, you've got the job. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8189 Pull it out and you become regional manager. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8190 The boss prefers to use medieval emojis 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8191 No, I will not "pull your hilt." 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8192 Isn't that the sword from our last ad campaign? 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8193 Arthur’s a bit of a show off but he’s one heck of a salesman. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8194 Arthur, I hope you like the office. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8195 I recommend that you work around it. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8196 Why did he stab the desk and not John, he stole my wings dammit 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8197 It worked for King Arthur 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8198 You think Theresa will mind if I pull it out? 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8199 He pulls the sword from the desk to remind us that he is the "right and truthful" President. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8200 Welcome to Deskcalibur. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8201 You were once a man of great caliber. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8202 For the final portion of the interview, Art, whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise junior account manager. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8203 He lived through us for far too long. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8204 Now there's a Chief Executed Officer. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8205 Nothing exalted. He just tried to committ suicide and missed. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8206 He'll be so sorry he took an early lunch! 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8207 naw - it looks more medieval to me... 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8208 HR says that whoever can pull the sword out of the desk gets to be CEO. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8209 I thought I told Arthur to get a round table! 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8210 Damocles won't be happy to pay for a new desk. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8211 Tell me Lance are you ready to be CEO? 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8212 Flip it left only if you want to destroy all files in the building. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8213 The board has decided it's the best way to select the4 new CEO. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8214 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is the right wise accountant of all of Green, Grubb & Associates. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8215 Looks like Arthur went home early. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8216 They say our new CTO is some sort of wunderkind 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8217 It's a legendary statement. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8218 Our headhunter is searching at Renaissance Fairs. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8219 Well, Arthur, now that Mr. Pendragon has retired will you apply to be CEO? 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8220 The legend says that the person who removes the sword will get an acceptable work-life balance. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8221 We don't have a gym, but you'll get plenty of exercise trying to pull it out. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8222 Pull it out and you will work 60 hours per week 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8223 The recruiter with the pointy hat put it there as part of the CEO search. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8224 He thought his desk was legendary, but I always told him it’s no light saber. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8225 Whoever can pull out this sword out of this desk, is the rightful CEO. Care to try? 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8226 Everyone thinks the place will fall apart once they’re fired. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8227 We'll know soon enough if you're the right man for the job. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8228 Seems about right. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8229 I warned him about hiring Thor who deeply into genealogy, but he wouldn't listen. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8230 I think he went to Under Armour. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8231 I know concrete is fashionable but I don't think that'll work. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8232 Mr. Pendragon's hiring process is unorthodox, but it's a far cry from the days before HR got involved, when he'd send applicants wading out into the harbor. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8233 Creative anachronism Friday’s. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8234 Did anyone get hurt? 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8235 I would say it means, "Don't ask for a raise and better working conditions." 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8236 So now the sword of Damocles is literal. Doggone reality TV has ruined everything... 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8237 I'm telling you, singing candlesticks are the toughest prey you'll ever meet. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8238 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise CEO of all the corporation. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8239 The Knights of the Round Table, say 'No DEAL!!!!!' 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8240 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this pressboard and desk, is rightwise internal communications liaison born. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8241 Gives a whole new meaning to desktop publishing. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8242 They say that whoever can pull it out gets to be CEO. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8243 Looks like Garys been practicing for that promotion. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8244 Pull this sword out and you will begin making 200x the average employee’s salary. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8245 I knew we shouldn’t have fired that knight. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8246 The boss was pretty serious about making me the new headhunter. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8247 I wonder how the merger went. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8248 The say the pen is mightier than the sword but poor George would not agree! 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8249 I wonder who our next true leader will be. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8250 It takes a magician to run the Camelot Division. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8251 I don't think the pen is mightier than the sword! 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8252 Thank goodness he's gone; he was incredibly vindictive. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8253 She's was always sword of angry about philanderers wanting her to arbitrate. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8254 . 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8255 The expectations are high. Unfortunately, so is the window. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8256 Hunting these days is so yesterday! 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8257 Yeah...no one's even tried 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8258 If you pull out the sword, you're the new king of only this office. Huzzah! 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8259 He put the Ex in Excalibur. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8260 The consultant considers our succession plan outdated. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8261 we still havent found a CEO strong enough to lead us 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8262 Whoever removes the sword will free the world of corporate greed. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8263 That reminds me, Alexa, please schedule my colonoscopy. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8264 Go for it, Art 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8265 When Peter Drucker told Arthur that the only true sign of success was successfully picking a successor, I had no idea Arthur would take him so seriously. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8266 Legend says that whoever can pull out the sword will become CEO. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8267 This should dramatically streamline our succession planning process. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8268 Whoever pulls out the sword, shall be the CEO. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8269 The desk is yours, if you can extract the sword. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8270 Our CEO fancies himself a king. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8271 This is the fina, This is the final stage of the interview 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8272 No wonder he invited Merlyn to join the Board 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8273 This corner office with a view can be yours if you can remove the sword from the desk. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8274 They say whoever pulls it out will be appointed our new CFO. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8275 High School English Literature. Mr. D, room 3. What was that punchline? 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8276 Spada nella scrivania - I guess it is as valid a succession plan as any. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8277 I can be CEO! I can be CEO! 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8278 I guess he's been cut loose. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8279 Whoever pulls it out becomes the new CEO of the firm. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8280 Beats that pen set I got him... Or DOES it? 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8281 Whoever is pure enough at heart to pull the sword out of the desk gets healthcare and a 401(k). 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8282 It happens when email no longer gets the message across. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8283 If we steal it we could go on Unemployment and do the Running of the Bulls. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8284 He had a King Arthur thing; the last test, pull out the sword and the presidency your's. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8285 Listen Artie, all ya gotta do is pull the sword outta the desk & you’re golden! 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8286 Where is Sir Lancelot when I need him? 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8287 Whoever can pull the sword out of the desk is automatically knighted & gets a seat at the round table in the company’s board room. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8288 Pull it out, and you'll become the rightwise King born of all England. Think you can handle it? 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8289 This is a downgrade from Arthur's Seat. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8290 He who extracts this sword will become the CEO and majority shareholder of the RAMJAC empire. Good luck. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8291 The search for a new CEO is not going well. 1.1020 0.06008 49 46 1 2
8292 Me? Nah. 'With great power comes great tax liability.' 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8293 Whoever gets the sword out of the desk becomes boss. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8294 They say whoever pulls the sword from the desk will become the rightful chairman of Lester, Lester & Sons 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8295 Don't pull the sword from the desk or you will have to reign over this furtive organization 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8296 Legend says: Only the one true branch manager has to report this to H.R. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8297 I think we're going to have to beef up the Positive Workplace training. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8298 It's been difficult recruiting a new CEO since the hanging sword of Damocles became Excalibur. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8299 If your can pull the sword out, you shall become King Murray. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8300 Dunno. We’re waiting for Merlin’s callback. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8301 Our boss is a sword. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8302 When they said "hostile takeover" I thought it was an aggressive stock purchase thing. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8303 Whoever pulls it out has to answer the phone and support Trump's tweets. It's been there over a year. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8304 Apparently he hid under the desk when Kim Jong-un entered the room. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8305 They say whoever the next "true" CEO is, will rise to the occasion by removing ExCalibur from the desk. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8306 Just like sword in the stone. Whoever pulls it out of the desk first gets to be boss. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8307 He got the point without electronics! 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8308 The pen may be mightier than the sword, but the sword appears to be mightier than the desk. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8309 I know you hate annual evaluations, Art, but let's just get this over. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8310 This used to be King Arthur Andersen’s office. 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8311 Ex Calib-her. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8312 Whoever removes the sword, becomes C.E.O. . 1.1020 0.05253 49 45 3 1
8313 Our CEO is always on the cutting edge. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8314 The board decided this was a better way to pick the next CEO. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8315 King Arthur got start-up. 1.1020 0.04369 49 44 5 0
8316 And this is where we do our succession planning. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8317 I'll take a stab at it, but common sense dictates that I revise my resume ASAP. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8318 The company recently had to make some cuts and lay off the hiring team. They say whoever takes the sword out of the desk is “the true regional manager”. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8319 She said she needed a vacation but this is an unexpected departure. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8320 H.R. is streamlining the interview process. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8321 Even allowing for the new round table in the board room, our executive search firm may have raised expectations too high. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8322 If you can extract the sword the job is yours. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8323 I suppose the merger is back on. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8324 Here at Excalibur Industries, the C-Suite is hard to fill. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8325 Your predecessor left grudgingly. Please requisition a smaller letter opener. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8326 It's good to be the King but tough to keep the crown.. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8327 No , ”Gihade” does not require fire arms... 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8328 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk and wood is rightwise manager of the entire office. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8329 We put our sharpest minds on it. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8330 Pull the sword out and the corner office is yours! 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8331 Well Merlin, here's your chance at being CEO. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8332 This is Arthur's office. He's a fuckin' dweeb that loves mythology. We fired his ass after he threw a tantrum for not getting a round table. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8333 Our company is in real trouble. This is the interview room for candidates to qualify to be the new CEO. 1.1000 0.05890 50 47 1 2
8334 "There's a bonus...if you can pull this off by 5p.m. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8335 I was told when I started here that whoso pulleth out that sword of that elegant mahogany executive desk is rightwise CEO of the company until an inevitable corporate merger replaces the reigning leadership structure in its entirety. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8336 Get that out and you’re the new CEO 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8337 The prophecy says ‘Let whomever may remove the sword become CEO’ 1.1000 0.05890 50 47 1 2
8338 He who pulleth the sword, gets a view of the park. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8339 Of course he can't pull it out. Look under the desk. He's stuck with his own sword. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8340 The Board voted that the candidate who removes the sword becomes our next CEO. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8341 Unless the X-ray lasers and nukes are hidden in the hilt, supply has made a classic boo-boo. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8342 That’s Arthur’s desk. He’s king of the ITs. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8343 I support the New Yorker union. 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8344 Don't even think about pulling it out. He's looking for a sales rep to go to Palestine. 1.1000 0.05890 50 47 1 2
8345 He always said the pen was mightier. The finance team thought otherwise. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8346 The boss is kind of a medievalist. If you can pull the sword, you get your promotion. 1.1000 0.05890 50 47 1 2
8347 I'm surprised at the low tech aspect of the message. 1.1000 0.05151 50 46 3 1
8348 I always told him don't sit on your desk 1.1000 0.04286 50 45 5 0
8349 That’s one way to do succession planning... 1.0980 0.05777 51 48 1 2
8350 Does this mean there won't be another season of GOT? 1.0980 0.05053 51 47 3 1
8351 Hell of a way to pick a new CEO. 1.0980 0.04205 51 46 5 0
8352 Well Arthur, have a go and see if it is your destiny to have the desk with a view. 1.0980 0.04205 51 46 5 0
8353 Now... That’s a new way to pick a CEO 1.0980 0.04205 51 46 5 0
8354 Until the true king comes by, I'd watch my legs. 1.0980 0.04205 51 46 5 0
8355 'We should have spell checked our Union contract. This "maternity cleave" policy is going to be an issue...' 1.0980 0.04205 51 46 5 0
8356 Just one more question and the job is yours. 1.0980 0.04205 51 46 5 0
8357 It’s called our Excalibur Model, but nobody likes it 1.0980 0.05053 51 47 3 1
8358 He who pulls the sword from the desk is the true head of accounting. 1.0980 0.05053 51 47 3 1
8359 Practicing my dragonslaying! 1.0980 0.05777 51 48 1 2
8360 Not an Episcopalian, the knife’s in the wrong place. 1.0962 0.04958 52 48 3 1
8361 One good pull and the corner office is yours, and you get Camilla Bowes, too. 1.0943 0.04053 53 48 5 0
8362 Medieval Times Hiring Event - Director of Operations: Please remove your shoes before applying 1.0943 0.04867 53 49 3 1
8363 And here is the final task in your quest to become Lord of Accounting. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8364 After the movie came out, being the King of New York became too clichéd for anyone to even want to try to pull it out. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8365 We used to leave it to a majority of the directors, but now we think we found a better way to choose a right-wise CEO. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8366 So for tax reasons this is our new CEO. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8367 Go ahead, Arthur from the mail room...No Ivy League applicant has been able to remove it. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8368 No one has tried yet because none of us want to be CEO 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8369 So, is this the end of Camelot? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8370 He Camelot and he left a lot. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8371 I'd state the obvious, but no one would believe me! 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8372 Arthur will be disappointed to see we gave him a rectangular table 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8373 Nobody can pull it out. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8374 He said 10 o’clock sharp. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8375 Memo from Zorro: We’re not paying for your wall. (Or “for no stinkin’ wall”) 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8376 I knew 'the sword stops here' metaphor would end badly. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8377 According to company legend, whoever removes it gets the corner office. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8378 Is he coming back to get his sword? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8379 Well, Arthur, do you want to be Chairman of the Board? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8380 More mismanagement - he was supposed to fall on it 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8381 I think he's planning to use it for his next inauguration. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8382 Whoever can outsource this is the rightful CEO. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8383 The message said, ‘Whoso pulleth out this sword from my desk will be the new CEO.’ 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8384 Intimidating I agree, but you should see what she can do with "the pen" 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8385 They never made his dad try to pull it out either when he got named CEO. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8386 It's Corporate's new effort to find a worthy chief executive." 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8387 He'll be back shortly. He went to get a pen. 1.0889 0.06214 45 43 0 2
8388 Roger worked late Monday, streamed the playoff pregame show, and -- well, let's just say that the IT people meant it when they said be careful with the new high-resolution monitors. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8389 I hope J.B. wasn't sleeping under his desk again. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8390 Whoever can pull it out gets to be CEO. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8391 We like you, but there is 1 more test to become our CEO. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8392 Bring in the intern. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8393 Damn! So that's why the C.E.O. named three sons Arthur and his daughter Guinevere. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8394 I tried to pull it out, but it really only works when the guy in the Merlin costume is here. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8395 Whoso pulleth out this letter opener is rightwise mailroom chief born . . . . or we could do your six-month review. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8396 I warned him about working too many “knights”. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8397 Not to worry, I have an app for that.......... 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8398 ...and this is the office of the VP of HR. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8399 I wish I could remember what happens to me if I pull it out. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8400 Pass this last step in the interview process, and you’ll be CEO of the King Arthur Flour company. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8401 I think he's trying to give Disney a hint. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8402 They say that's how they found Monica Lewinsky under the desk. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8403 So, all you have to do is pull it out and Bam! Middle management. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8404 Not bad for a first stab at an office job 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8405 Prophecy says that he who removes the sword will earn five hundred times as much as everyone else. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8406 This means he has an appointment. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8407 We have quite a bit of turnover in this office. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8408 Looks like Perkins got the shaft. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8409 I don't think Mr. Damocles is going to make the company party up in Syracuse tonight. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8410 Whoever pulls the sword from the desk, gets the job. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8411 I know it's not round, but you'll pull it out 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8412 Last guy turned it into a standing desk. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8413 If anybody pulls it out, we're going to have to get a round table for the conference room. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8414 This is the result of the $100,000 succession plan. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8415 Have you heard ... Arthur has asked for a round desk. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8416 Its in lieu of aptitude tests, interviews and such. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8417 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise Auditor born of Corporate Accounts, Northeast. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8418 The CEO search committee is trying something new this time around... 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8419 It's a test they give every CEO candidate. HR calls it "the King Maker" 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8420 The prophecy says that our next CEO will be found next fiscal quarter. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8421 A Rabbi Smaltz brisk was aways a splashy affair. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8422 You think the knife is large, you should see the big cheese.... 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8423 Rock, paper, scissors...to see who gives it a try first.... 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8424 It used to just be a paper note bound with a tack that read: "gone fishin'" ...Uneasy lies the head that wears a crown. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8425 I thought you might think that, but it's really just wear Jack puts his hat. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8426 You get the corner office Johnson,...IF you can pull that sword out of the desk. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8427 That is why we are called Excalibur Exporting. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8428 Jeremy doesn't get it. September 19 is talk like a pirate day, not treat your desk like a pirate would day. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8429 IS THAT THE PUD I'M SUPPOSED TO PULL? SHARP!!! 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8430 They say he who pulls it out is... Better check with HR. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8431 He probably watched "Solo" last night. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8432 So far only a naive cleaning guy pulled it out, but we decided he wasn't the one, so, the search goes on... 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8433 Bob certainly made his mark at the company. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8434 Ok, Arthur. Let’s see about that promotion. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8435 We tried ZipRecruiter. HR suggested this. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8436 If you can remove it its your job. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8437 Some may call our interview process medieval, but if you can pull the sword from the desk the position is yours. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8438 Arthur wanted to be sure an intern didn't take his desk. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8439 The kingdom just hasn't been the same since King Arthur went to that Six Sigma seminar. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8440 Nah! It's a new meme for "cash me ousside". 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8441 Then he said, 'Here's your damn succession plan,' and stormed out. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8442 Maybe Arthur in the mailroom has a higher destiny. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8443 The one who pulls the sword from the stone desk will become president. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8444 We all knew that the Cult of Constanza would end poorly. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8445 When you said your boss was a two-handed longsword, I thought you were joking. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8446 We're going to need more weight training in the career development program. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8447 He’s on sabbatical until the next season of “Game of Thrones.” 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8448 I just wanted to ask him how a pen could be dragging. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8449 President Trump and Leader Kim Jong Un for once worked together, putting an end to Japan's Prime Minister Shinzo Abe's national concern as Trump consider pulling troops out of the region. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8450 If you can pull it out you get the corner office with the round table 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8451 The boss really stuck it to him. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8452 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is rightwise King born of all pencil pushers. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8453 It's the new way to become a CEO- proves you're worthy of the job. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8454 Who knew it was a stone desk? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8455 I know what you're thinking, but he just likes to watch. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8456 It’s a test for the next round of CEO applicants. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8457 If you can draw it out the office is yours 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8458 The CEO Search Committee came up with it. Interviews start Monday. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8459 Looks like Viviane is in a meeting 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8460 The Board of Directors is sitting at the round table, trying to find a new CEO for Excaliber Corp. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8461 The one who removes it shall be CEO. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8462 After some difficult times, we are hoping that you are the one who can get us back on track. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8463 The job is your if you can pull the sword out. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8464 Whosoever draws the sword from the desk shall embrace their true destiny as the managing partner of Bronwyn, Hastings, and Long, LLP. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8465 Hmmmm...looks like we should have hung on to all those Bics! 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8466 They said whoever pulls it out gets to be CEO of Uber. So far nobody's even tried. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8467 The intern studied renaissance art. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8468 His son will be the successor; no one wants to remove the sword. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8469 I remember when HR just sent you a memo to remind you of your annual review. 1.0889 0.06214 45 43 0 2
8470 "Legendary leadership" can be more than management hyperbole, son. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8471 I really think you have a great shot at CFO 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8472 Do you happen to know how Art likes his coffee? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8473 The boss says that Excalibur is really really fantastic, but I think he's jealous that Camelot was already taken. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8474 My only complaint about this new cutting edge desk is that, if I'm not careful, I often get my right leg nicked. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8475 If you can pull it out, you win the boss's daughter. Joe in accounting did, but when he saw her, he stuck it back in and quit. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8476 HR says if you can pull the sword, you become EVP 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8477 After my sales presentation I was hiding under my desk. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8478 I think he’s telling us he’s taking a stab at this job. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8479 Whatever you do, don't pull the lever to the right. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8480 Should we let inside the firm try first? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8481 I told him not to hide under the desk but he never listened to me. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8482 A real bummer! At least Mr. Knight tried his best to pull it out! 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8483 Doozy of a help wanted ad we're looking here, Bob. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8484 Try it; the consequences arn't so dire." 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8485 Anyone who can pull it out will become CFO. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8486 Not it! 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8487 Yes, We have initiated a cutting-edge CEO candidate search. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8488 We're rebooting the "Arthur" franchise. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8489 Rumor has it that Mr. Merlin is looking for a CEO replacement up in Camelot. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8490 If Mr. and Mrs. King hadn’t named him Arthur, he wouldn’t be pulling these ploys. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8491 Just once. Smote your predecessor after addressing him as 'Artie'. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8492 The last guy left very very suddenly .......... 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8493 Yes, that's the first dollar he ever earned. But he's a sentimentalist, anyway. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8494 When even the Knight in Shinning Armour gives up! 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8495 Harry really pushed it too far this time...The Prince isn't going to find this funny. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8496 It's a trap! 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8497 He who removes the sword shall be be CEO 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8498 We're trying out a new method for picking our next CEO 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8499 Welcome to the final round of the interview. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8500 When did they hire King Arthur? And why isn't his desk round? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8501 I know it's ridiculous, but it's the only way to get to the C-Suite at this company 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8502 Arthur stopped by while you were at lunch. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8503 She decided to become a chef. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8504 It’ll take a special person for this position! 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8505 Ivy League, 4.0... That kid was perfect. Too bad he couldn't pull the sword out of the desk. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8506 Apparently, our CEO is tired of modern EQ tests for job interview. This is an old-fashioned EQ test. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8507 Said he would never leave in springtime. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8508 Someone is going to get it. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8509 That’s right...if you can pull it out and the promotion is yours. 1.0889 0.06214 45 43 0 2
8510 Looks like rain. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8511 So much as a wiggle and you're promoted. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8512 Well, here's another fine mess you've gotten us into. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8513 He who pulls the sword gets the corner office. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8514 Whoever pulls the sword out gets to be CEO 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8515 You think it's Excalibur, but it's really just used to cut the budget. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8516 He who pulls it receives compensation, Exec-calibur 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8517 To take it out requires being worthy of royalty and having the correct amortization schedules. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8518 Company name? Excalibur. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8519 And if you are interested, we do offer an early retirement plan. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8520 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise off this Friday 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8521 ?Whoso pulleth this sword... ahhh forget it... 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8522 Only the true CEO shall save us. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8523 That's how we decide your Christmas bonus. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8524 And a small test to check you fit the job. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8525 Legend has it whoso pulleth out the sword, is the rightful CEO. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8526 You call it a sword, I call it a hefty severance package 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8527 I've heard of "when the shoe drops" but....... 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8528 The last guy to take a stab at it couldn't budget. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8529 According to the trustees, only one who is pure of heart, strong in character, and unblemished by harassment scandal will be able remove the sword and lead our company. to victory. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8530 Oh,no! I guess we have to re-name the candy bar. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8531 Our expectations aren't set in stone but At least management's policies are not set in stone. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8532 After all the talk about glass cliffs, we realized we needed to make the competition a bit more appealing. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8533 Right, Well AFTER you try that about 10,000 times, they want you to answer the phone and take messages. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8534 Our Senior H.R. Director handles "staff reduction" the "old fashion" way. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8535 I wonder if Damocles wants references! His trademark says it all! 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8536 This requires an on-air pullout from five feet up. 1.0889 0.06214 45 43 0 2
8537 it is going to be our new interview style. we need to find some heroes for the sales department. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8538 He who pulls the sword from the desk can move to the corner office. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8539 Where's Arthur? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8540 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this stone, is right wise Head of Marketing for the North West Division. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8541 Sorry about the desk. Your predecessor didn't respect wood. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8542 They said he couldn't cut it. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8543 Betcha Arthur will be the next CEO. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8544 They say that only the legitimate CEO whose heart is fair and true can draw the sword and rule the desk. Fat chance, eh? 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8545 Ive been trying to get that job for years, just can't seem to pull it off. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8546 Ed always had a flair for being so sharp. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8547 Hiding under the desk didn't work for old Jim. Hiding under the desk didn't,t work this time. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8548 Give it a try, Art. If you can pull it out, the job's yours. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8549 I think Steve got a new pen. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8550 The lady said, "You drained my lake". This will have to do. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8551 Sure, it’s been a long search. But even the business school doesn’t teach the type of skill set we’re looking for. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8552 He quit rather melodramatically. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8553 Arthur, Schmarthur. If the boss is stuck underneath that thing I would call the medics first. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8554 The legend says that whomsoever can pull the sword from the desk becomes Supply Chain Manager. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8555 All that Camelot commemoration got to him. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8556 I wouldn’t object you being interim. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8557 If you can pull the sword from the desk you become CEO. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8558 His way of saying it’s time to sell off the ploughshares division. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8559 Who would do such a thing? 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8560 If you can find a caption for this, you are the true boss of the New Yorker offices. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8561 After typing in your password, you'll be walked through what to do next. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8562 I would'nt try if i were you. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8563 Worst transition plan ever. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8564 Our last candidate didn't even bring a pen, but I'm sure you'll do just fine. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8565 Harry Houdini's office clean out. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8566 Whomever draweth this sword, shall rule this downsizing accounting firm... 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8567 Before the Board can vote on you, we need to see if you are CEOcaliber 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8568 Looks like the boss is busy 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8569 He just "said . "Time to be bold" And fly like the "Eagles" 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8570 Our interview process at Camelot Industries may be a bit different than what you're used to. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8571 If you can pull the sword out of the desk you get an extra summer vacation day. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8572 It’s a classic but effective approach to merit-based raises. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8573 You try first. I've never sought that kind of paparazzi attention. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8574 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise middle-management born. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8575 Anyone who successfully draws it is going to be disappointed to find that the boardroom table is round. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8576 He was the last CEO to open his own mail. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8577 Actually, that's Excoffee. Pull that from the desk, and you get to be the CEO's personal assistant. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8578 I guess the boss forgot the wisdom of "Live by the sword, die by the sword" 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8579 They say if you can pull it out you'll win two tickets to a revival of "Camelot. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8580 that's his computer partner, Don,t mess with him! 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8581 Well Anderson, one of you is getting knighted and Arthur seems pretty confident. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8582 Whoso pulleth this sword of this desk shall have the red stapler. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8583 We are overjoyed to be hiring a chief excalibur officer. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8584 It’s the only way I can access my account. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8585 If you can extract it, you get the corner office. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8586 It’s our corporate succession plan. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8587 Merlin, are you sure he's my boss ? I'm pretty sure that's how CEOs get pay-cuts Arthur. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8588 The view belongs to the first person that can take out the sword. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8589 We admit it's an unorthodox way to elect a CEO. Just have it off your desk by five. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8590 We'll need someone of executive caliber for this position. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8591 Arthur the job is yours for the taking. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8592 The sword is for when he runs out of ink. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8593 The last boss just couldn't cut it. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8594 Yeah, there's actually even a round table in the conference room. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8595 I don't care what the board of directors says. Pull it out and you're our new CEO. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8596 The desk is not mightier than the sword. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8597 They say whoever pulls it out can skip 10 meetings of their choosing 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8598 They outsourced HR to some place in England. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8599 That the HR desk ... nobody tries to pull that sword. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8600 Now it is explained the boss' new look : that white long beard and the pointed hat. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8601 Where is King Arthur when we need him? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8602 The board is very serious about succession planning. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8603 He couldn't even fall on the right end. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8604 You were born for this! 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8605 Isn't there an Arthur from Accounting? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8606 Pull it out and you are destined to be a legendary trader. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8607 Only his 3rd day on the job, Gary from the mailroom was crowned CEO. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8608 So -- you want to try your shot at CEO? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8609 Rumor is that whoever can pull it out makes CEO. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8610 Now I know why my boss told me not to have Merlin train Arthur. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8611 He again was unable to remove the sword. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8612 Remember interviews before we switched to case questions? 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8613 It was backstabbing of him to hide his mistress under his desk anyway. 1.0889 0.06214 45 43 0 2
8614 hiring at $50 an hour 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8615 My liege, King Arthur of the Square Table, has yet to return from lunch. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8616 Me (us) trying to come up with a caption for this cartoon with hope that I will be a breakout comedic writer for The New Yorker. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8617 It looks like the king is out for the day. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8618 The interview consists of pulling out Excalibur 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8619 The stuff this kid pulls...it's like he's living in some fantasy world. 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8620 If you can pull it out, you get to be CEO. 1.0889 0.04290 45 41 4 0
8621 Does Arthur still work here, or did we fire him already? 1.0889 0.05339 45 42 2 1
8622 He finally decided on a succession plan. 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8623 Arthur, let me explain. Excalibur, no. ExOfficio, yes. 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8624 She must have rushed out. When I fired her, I left her a note to throw it in the lake where she found it for her replacement. 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8625 I guess that’s what we get for hiring Merlin to find our new CEO. 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8626 Whoever can pull Excalibur from the desk will get this office with a window. 1.0870 0.05225 46 43 2 1
8627 Mr. Arthur's time machine experiments are starting to get more accurate. 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8628 "If you can pull it out, the office is your's.".... 1.0870 0.05225 46 43 2 1
8629 Well Artie, since we let Lance go, the office is all yours. Hope you have better luck! 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8630 No, this isn’t Camelot. That isn’t Excalibur and there’s no blood because Tuesday is cleaning day. 1.0870 0.05225 46 43 2 1
8631 If you thought that fishy smell in the breakroom was tough to get out... 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8632 Oh no, he forgot to take it to the cost cutting meeting! 1.0870 0.05225 46 43 2 1
8633 Dibs, I get to look under the desk. 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8634 It's the new bosses way of telling you '' your not cutting the mustard "! 1.0870 0.05225 46 43 2 1
8635 Cross your heart and hope to die? 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8636 The final test. Pull the sword from the desk and the job is yours. 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8637 This is what I mean by waiting on King Arthur's reincarnation to lead the business. 1.0870 0.05225 46 43 2 1
8638 I should have exercised more for this interview. 1.0870 0.04200 46 42 4 0
8639 Damn, O'Cleeze, that thing barely missed you! 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8640 You're pulling my leg. 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8641 Whoever pulls it out can be the next CEO. It's not exactly the Sword in the Stone, but we did use super glue. 1.0851 0.05116 47 44 2 1
8642 I should have been tipped off by his nameplate: Arthur King 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8643 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise the CEO of Medieval Times Dinner Theater. 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8644 Ever since he started playing Skyrim, no one has seen him for weeks. 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8645 Mr. Jones?... Miss Penny?... Mrs. Jones! 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8646 This pen holder is why we don't do white elephant parties anymore. 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8647 Hmm... Must be on PTO sword fishing again. 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8648 It is said that whosoever pulls out the sword is the true regional accounts manager. 1.0851 0.05116 47 44 2 1
8649 Sure, there's the sword, but the position has great life insurance. 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8650 Now he's even LARPing in the office. 1.0851 0.05116 47 44 2 1
8651 We're in trouble... figured I might as well cut the budget in Human Resources while we look for a white knight. 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8652 It’s marketing’s idea. Whoever pulls it out will feel that they are the one that has won that thankless position. 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8653 2016 didn’t work out so well so the Dems are back to basics, leadership-choice wise. 1.0851 0.05116 47 44 2 1
8654 Only a Black, pregnant woman ever succeeded, but wasn’t boastful enough and didn’t get the job. 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8655 Just extract the sword and the position of CEO is yours, here at Arthurian Legends Incorporated. 1.0851 0.05116 47 44 2 1
8656 ''The only thing I know is that he ate a lot of sword fish." 1.0851 0.05116 47 44 2 1
8657 Well I guess it's better than training in the boss's son 1.0851 0.05116 47 44 2 1
8658 If you can remove the sword, you will become the true Digital Insights Influencer. 1.0851 0.04114 47 43 4 0
8659 Looks like another disappearing act. 1.0833 0.04031 48 44 4 0
8660 He must be hiding under the desk. 1.0816 0.04911 49 46 2 1
8661 It looks like William Wallace is out or lunch. 1.0750 0.04218 40 37 3 0
8662 If you can wrest it free, you get to be CEO. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8663 That new guy with the NRA badge did it this morning - wanted to show me it wasn’t the sword that wrecked my desk. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8664 It's been two years now without an accountant. This 'Dagger in the Desk' prophecy has really set us back. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8665 If you remove it, 99% of the office will hate you. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8666 He had to stop paying his secretary under the table 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8667 I know he's quick about it, I guess you're fired, Neil. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8668 I knew this company needed better leadership, but this seems a bit desperate. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8669 Not to worry - I have a pen. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8670 And we moved the round table down the hall. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8671 Only the true CEO will be able to pull it out. Assuming the board approves. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8672 He who removes the sword gets the unpaid internship 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8673 It's said that whomever removes this sword will achieve eternal success and 60-hour weeks. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8674 It happened last year. When Joe quit he threw down a challenge to management! 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8675 It's cheaper than hiring a recruiter. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8676 Part of our campaign to find the One True CEO 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8677 Apparently, it's the new way to set 'out of office' in outlook. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8678 I heard whoever pulls it out gets to be the one to apologize for human rights violations. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8679 I warned him that sharpening his computer skills online was maybe not the best approach. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8680 The board thought this would be simpler than a lengthy interview process. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8681 She's taking a page from The Donald motivational playbook. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8682 Your name isn’t Arthur by any chance? 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8683 Nobody understood what the sword had to do with the qualifications and requirements of becoming head of the legal department. HR insisted, however, that it was the least discriminatory hiring approach. They titled it “King and/or Queen Arthur”. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8684 Whoever pulls it out will mute the poor without spending a cent. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8685 And this was Damocles old office. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8686 When he found out he wouldn’t be working at a round table. He quit on the spot. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8687 We are waiting for Mueller to pull it out. No one else is trying. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8688 Lady Guinevere says it’s an HR issue. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8689 Taking it out declares war on Britain. "Who's the King now?" they call it. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8690 Pull out the sword and you become King! 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8691 They say whosoever pulls it from the desk will be the new CEO. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8692 We ought to give Pence a try first, don't you think? 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8693 Merlin has been telecommuting so we really have no idea. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8694 That's a first. Usually the gods throw thunderbolts.” 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8695 If you can pull it from marble desktop the office is rightfully yours. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8696 Arthur, this is he last test for the CEO position. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8697 I quit !!! 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8698 All of our VPs pulled their back trying to be the next CEO 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8699 Whomsoever can draw the sword from the desk will be anointed Chief Executioner Officer. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8700 The Game of Thrones potluck must be today? 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8701 It’s a good way to weed out the undecided. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8702 He never Pulled through with his: "Proficiency in Excel-ibur" 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8703 whoever pulls out the word is the new boss 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8704 It gives our CEO something to do 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8705 Alright Arthur, you really think you're ready for upper management? 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8706 This is his business version of the sword and the stone. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8707 Looks like my secretary has talked to Ronan Farrow. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8708 He who draws the sword from the desk shall be director of telemarketing. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8709 Said his name was Uther Pendragon. Isn’t that a character in “Harry Potter” 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8710 That was Mr. Excalibur to you soon. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8711 "On the optimistic side...maybe he's just making a giant piggy bank.' 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8712 Maybe we should start taking resumes now. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8713 Looks like he pulled an all-nighter. 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8714 We have not had a boss for centuries 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8715 It's serves as the Sword of Damocles to encourage VPs to leave... and Excalibur for their ambitious replacement. 1.0714 0.04022 42 39 3 0
8716 Do you think, if I can pull it out...? 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8717 Yeah, Lance just got rolled out of his office on a gurney after throwing his back out while pulling on that thing. How long do you think I should wait before I tell him that Art stuck it in there with superglue? 1.0714 0.05272 42 40 1 1
8718 Whosoever pulls the sword from the desk, shall rightful VP of Marketing be. 1.0698 0.03931 43 40 3 0
8719 He seemed like a high-caliber guy, but we had to let him go—he met his Excalibur. 1.0698 0.03931 43 40 3 0
8720 I was told that Zuckerberg pulled it out once back in '04, but he put it back after testifying before Congress last month. 1.0698 0.03931 43 40 3 0
8721 The search for our new CEO begins. 1.0698 0.03931 43 40 3 0
8722 this folks isn NOT fake news its the last word 1.0698 0.03931 43 40 3 0
8723 The last Vice President couldn't pull it out either, so we had to let him go. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8724 If you can pull it out, you receive a promotion. Unfortunately, the CEO will then insist that you call him 'Merlin.' 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8725 The new hire was adamant about having a round table for some reason. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8726 We find it much more efficient and cost effective than using a headhunter. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8727 Whoever pulls it out becomes the once and future CEO. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8728 You say the new boss’s name is Arthur? 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8729 Whoever pulls out the sword becomes the next CEO. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8730 I heard it’s how Warren Buffet’s Going to do it, too. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8731 King Arthur complex, but confusing harakiri & sudoku was problematic, new Oval Office legend. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8732 It's how we pick CEO's. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8733 So this is how the CEO Search Committee works! 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8734 I’m no Arthur and he’s no Merlin. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8735 We’re waiting for the one true CEO. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8736 He left in a huff. Said his contract calls for a round table. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8737 If you can pull that sword out of my desk I’ll keep you on. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8738 I think the new boss' name is Art. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8739 He couldn't pull it off, so they fired him. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8740 Forget about it. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8741 I guess for Ralph, hiding under his desk was a double-edged sword. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8742 Last CEO thought he was the Camelot Executive Officer 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8743 Mr. Prime Minister, here is our new cutting-edge World Leader desk. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8744 Said his name was Thorgood Marshall and I thought noting of it...until I saw this. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8745 Our readers continue to wonder if the pen is in fact mightier. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8746 He just wasn't cut out for the job. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8747 Stephen Spielberg ain't what he used to be. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8748 ... and this is HR. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8749 Legend holds that only Mueller may remove it - or one of his noble team steeped in the investigation of financial crimes 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8750 "Pull the sword, you get the job". 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8751 Mr. Arthur’s a little eccentric with his office decor, but at least there’s no button under the desk. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8752 He hasn't used that letter opener in years. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8753 I think the boss is telling us he's going to cut the staff. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8754 Maybe we better get Arthur in here so I can continue working. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8755 Yes, I could do it but does it come with stock options? 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8756 The idea is whoever pulls it out gets the job. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8757 It’s not a rock and he took a lot of stock. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8758 Looks like he did not want to split the profits down the middle. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8759 His sword is mightier than his pen. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8760 He must have been given the axe. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8761 As you can tell by the job's requirements, the boss is the old fashioned kind... 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8762 The origins are ancient, but in a nut shell the bird is dressed by aid of our CEO. We let our God pass between them. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8763 So now it's called the Sword and the Enterprise Zone, and if you pull it out you can be our CEO. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8764 The knave that pulleth out the sword, casts asunder the rule of antitrust doctrine 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8765 It’s part of our interview process. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8766 Welcome to 'Camelot's S & M Hideaway'. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8767 Apart from his other duties, he appears to be an illusionist as well 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8768 You’re right Arthur, it’s not a round table. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8769 In keeping with your selected office decor, we've provided you with a tablet PC over the traditional tower. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8770 You don’t see things like that too often. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8771 The Board set a high standard 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8772 ...And this is Arthur’s office. Only he was worthy to have this view. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8773 nope, that's all there is to it. pull it out of the desk and you get the job. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8774 Get Gwen in here... there is a sword tip under the desk that needs to get polished. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8775 Then we'll know if you are the man for the job 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8776 Lockhart's ordered a round table for the conference room just in case. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8777 No one wants to check to see if she's under the desk. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8778 Robert Half wasn't available. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8779 Humm, if you can pull it out. The kingdom's yours. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8780 I think Arthur didn’t make it, Lancelot. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8781 Pull that out, and you're the new head of Marvel Studios. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8782 Before he left, he muttered something about X Calib's bra. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8783 "He loved his desk job more than even his own life. He sacrificed it all. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8784 He really knows how to set the tone for a back stabbing culture. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8785 The nepotism in this company is a bit thick. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8786 I had it there in memory of Jon, but now it seems unnecessary. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8787 You get to be the next CEO if you can remove it and have the same last name as the current CEO. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8788 In case of emergency, you don't need to break glass. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8789 "What's your greatest weakness" just wasn't giving us the information we needed. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8790 Looks like Arthur is issuing another corporate challenge. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8791 His laptop says that it's called "Excalibur". 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8792 I knew the Camelot-themed executive training was a mistake. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8793 The boss is going all medieval on us. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8794 Whoever takes it out gets to be the new boss 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8795 At least Arthur is meeting with all the CEO candidates before he retires. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8796 He doesn't even get that much mail. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8797 The final qualification is, if you can pull out the sword the job is yours. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8798 We are disguising it as a desk until Arthur returns to save his people from warm beer, bad teeth, and roundabouts. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8799 Perhaps we had better lock the door. He might actually be able to do it. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8800 Maybe Arthur from Accounting can sword this one out. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8801 I guess the sword really was mightier. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8802 Oh great....feats of strength promotion day and I just pulled my back out yesterday. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8803 He is writing a new book: "The Sword in the Stone" A sure best seller!! 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8804 She had a piercing sense of humor 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8805 Well Mr. Arthur, I trust that you can now understand why we wanted you to start as soon as possible. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8806 I still don’t understand why his paychecks are delivered in envelopes that big.” “I’m sure he’s compensating for something else. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8807 That’s why he chuckled at the paper knife I gof him... 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8808 He left mumbling "just let Arthur take over!" 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8809 The interview for this job is pretty straight forward, so don’t waste a lot of time honing your spiel. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8810 Yeah, the headhunting thing just wasn’t doing it for the Board anymore 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8811 Wow, I guess Bill was serious about his renaissance excursion. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8812 Looks like Merlin's looking for a new CEO again. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8813 He was a great CEO, just got careless getting into that chair one day and sliced off his testicles. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8814 I don't mind that he quite, but did he have to ruin a perfectly fine desk? 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8815 Then, if you unsheathe Excaliber, you'll move higher on our qualified applicants list. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8816 Oh, I don't know, I believe his point was made perfectly clear, in his demonstration. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8817 Pull it out and you get to be ‘Senior’ Sales Associate. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8818 The CEO knows that the sword is mightier. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8819 It's not what you think. Ben Carson's wife wants a new desk. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8820 I guess this means war on Pillsbury 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8821 After Arthur, there's been a new succession plan. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8822 I'm do not posses the executive leadership skills to release the mighty weapon. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8823 If you can dislodge the sword, you get a ten percent raise and dental for life. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8824 So what that his first name was not Don, I told you no Quixote would stay long at this job. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8825 Someone told me he wanted a round one. Better Contact Merlin in HR. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8826 If you can pull that out of the desk, the job is yours. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8827 Only a guy named "Ulysses" was able to pull it out after the owner died.. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8828 I'm not pulling it out. It was found in his back. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8829 This is how we chose the next CEO 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8830 “As I see it, we only have 2 options”... 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8831 Didn't I say Sword Day is a bad idea? 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8832 Hey! I see you have a sword in your desk! What are you, King Arthur?!? 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8833 ...and now they make us have stupid safety training day every year 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8834 This is the part of the interview process where legends are born..... or not...... 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8835 King Arthur is taking a vacation day. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8836 I don't think this Excalibur remake will get a lot of traction. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8837 He tried to cut a big deal, but all he got was chopped liver 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8838 Is that one big letter opener, or mideveil shredder? 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8839 Trump said he'd relinquish his corporate interests under one condition 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8840 Turns out Gary couldn’t pull the sword from the stone desk, but he was smart enough to quit this place. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8841 When they asked for new desks I said 'Stick a pin in it!' 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8842 At least your new chair has a metal back 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8843 The manager told us to come to the office. I guess the sword is mightier than the pen. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8844 Whoso pulleth this sword of this desk is rightwise corner-office born. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8845 Sales are down. Our boss said he'd take a stab at improving them but the stabbing impaled him where it really hurts. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8846 The one who pulls the sword from the desk will be the next CEO. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8847 He who draws the sword from the desk, he shall be Managing Director 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8848 “Who pulls it is our next CEO,” said Arthur. “Really, I thought your admin was decorating for bosses day,” said Ector. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8849 After he researched his roots, he thinks he’s decended from Sir Arthur. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8850 I heard he demanded a round table 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8851 This guy in HR told me it’s all about fake news and reality tv. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8852 He crossed his T's and dotted his I's but forgot the X in excalibur. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8853 remove the sword, lead the company 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8854 I hear that if you pull it out, you make 400 times as much. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8855 He said whoever pulls it out gets a raise, but honestly I don't think that's good management. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8856 I know he was set on getting shorter memos, but this is going too far. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8857 And this is our disability compliant office for people with no left foot. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8858 So, you think you're executive material? Well. we do things a little differently here at Excalibur..." 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8859 No idea. Did you ask Arthur? 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8860 Yes, he’s gone. The sword in the new office offered more perks. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8861 That’s for hacking into computer servers. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8862 The path to power. Better do some more lifting, Frank. You're not ready yet. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8863 I've heard of downing tools but this is taking it a bit far! 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8864 Now I understand why the CEO search was restricted to men named Arthur. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8865 They were concerned. As their boss's body was usually under the sword. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8866 He'll be back from the roundtable this afternoon 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8867 Human Resources hopes this way of choosing the True Director General will work better than the last one. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8868 It's called Excelibur. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8869 White House communications director selection process gets a promising facelift. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8870 The point is through yet still across. I do believe I'll get those TPS reports done immediately. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8871 Well Arthur, this is what I've been talking about since you first started here at Caliburn. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8872 The sword is mightier than the pen. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8873 Our opportunities for advancement in this company are straight forward. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8874 Whoever can pull out the sword becomes the Chief Excalibur Officer 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8875 The legend goes that 'Whomsoever removeth Excalibur from the desk receiveth 'free Uber rides to Boonton Township' for life.' 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8876 It's how we determine the next CEO 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8877 . 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8878 A flag on the seventy-third floor? What the fuck? 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8879 Well, looks like we lost another one. Who's next in line for a promotion? 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8880 Hey Arthur do I become king if I can pull the sword out? 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8881 We work hard for the knight life. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8882 If you think that's impressive, just wait until you see what the pen can do. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8883 Hurry and pull it out--you're scheduled to lead the meeting at the Round Conference Table in five minutes. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8884 I wish it was Sunday. Because that's my fun-day. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8885 Google’s final applicant challenge...it’s job security for senior management 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8886 We found a better way to choose senior management. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8887 Legend has it that whoever pulls this sword gets all of the TPS reports. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8888 Looks like the boss will be conducting another interview. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8889 We are waiting for someone to release Excalibur and lead us to success. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8890 It is said that whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is right wise CEO born of all this corporation and its subsidiaries. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8891 Legend foretells that whosoever pulleth the sword from yon davenport, shall be the one true senior VP of brand acquisition and development. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8892 When did you say Arthur is back? 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8893 They say whomever pulls the sword from the desk gets a key to the executive bathroom. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8894 Whoever can dislodge it becomes CEO. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8895 He wanted to download a message from the cloud. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8896 You will also be taking over Atilla's protfolio. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8897 Good luck. It's really in there. I think I'm pretty happy in my current position anyway. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8898 Only He who can remove this sword, will become our next CEO. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8899 Arthur really needs to get a grip. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8900 We added a new clause to the release after the last winner thrust it back the next day. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8901 Legend has it that the stock option grant will double for the CEO who can pull it out. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8902 This is the real Camelot. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8903 One final screening test. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8904 You can move to the office with a window only if you can pull the sword from the desk. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8905 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk, is right wise inheritor of this corner office. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8906 he who pulleth the sword from the desk assumeth the chair. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8907 Well, what do you expect? Our boss's name is Arthur King. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8908 You'll be replacing Arthur. Guess he decided not to take his sword with him. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8909 Give it a yank, Art. Maybe you'll be the next CEO. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8910 He said something about a deep state media headline! 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8911 He was SO dedicated to the company, in death, as in life; he never even wanted to leave his desk. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8912 Not even EXCALIBUR will save them now! 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8913 I don't think we have to worry - between campaigning and golf, the president hasn't been at his desk for weeks.... 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8914 What a world! Now the sword is mightier than the pen! 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8915 Well, I could not find a decent rock in Central Park either and the table is now square. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8916 He promised me the job when he left. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8917 If you can pull the sword from the desk, you've got the job. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8918 So much for being Warren Buffett's heir apparent here at BH 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8919 I'm seeing a strong message to me there's a problem with our metal detector. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8920 If you can pull it out, you get to sit in the seat until someone puts it in your back. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8921 They told me his nerves just couldn't take anymore bad internet connections. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8922 Cutting back on his vacation days was a bad idea Bob... 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8923 Boss says whoever pulls it from the desk will be made partner 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8924 A street mime pulled the sword, but failed to crack the computer password. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8925 The board of directors are tired of going through resumes, so they decided to let the sword choose the next CEO. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8926 The last CEO that pulled out his sword in the office was fed to dragons... 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8927 The note read: 'He who draws the sword from the desk will become the next boss'...so far, no one has succeeded. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8928 Seems like a bit much just to choose a new marketing chief. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8929 The one who pulls it out inherits $64M in back taxes and an SEC investigation. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8930 I GUESS THAT'S A LEFT-HANDED COMPLIMENT! 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8931 Whosoever shall pull this sword from the desk is rightwise king born of all middle management. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8932 Hey Art, what's the big deal about pulling that out of the boss's desk? 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8933 We listen to staff feedback received formally through the employee engagement survey. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8934 I warned him that the Lady of the Lake wasn't going to tolerate his usual behavior. 1.0513 0.05128 39 38 0 1
8935 Who said the pen was mightier than the sword? 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8936 Why are they making a movie here Just back away slowly 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8937 Well, let's see if you have what it takes to be a VP. 1.0513 0.03578 39 37 2 0
8938 Oh dear! Mr. Wotan got lost. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
8939 They are waiting for King Arthur to save the company! 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
8940 The Chair escaped the assassination attempt. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8941 If you can pull it out, you’ll be the next C.E.O. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8942 You go, you're a Remainer. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8943 He wasn't just a piece of the rock, he WAS the rock. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8944 We should have had a better succession plan for our CEO than this sword in the desk thing 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
8945 They say who ever pulls the sword from the desk becomes the company's CEO 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8946 I always told him not to hide under the desk. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8947 C'mon, where going to Kevin's to watch Game Of Thr... 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8948 No doubt about it, Louie: She has some boyfriend issues. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8949 Did you say you were an author or an Arthur? 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8950 He mumbled something about Damocles and a rotten stockbroker. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8951 Whomever succeeds in removing it shall be considered agile and clever enough to explain to Congress why we’re too big to fail. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8952 Now all you have to do is pull it out and the job is yours. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8953 Seems Harold was the first to get the call from HR. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8954 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise divisional branch manager 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8955 They call it 12th-century modern, King Arthur Edition. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
8956 Our HR dept require I tell you “it’s a two way mirror.” 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
8957 He wants you to know that this is a family business! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8958 I'd advise that you never take your work home with you. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8959 It looks like William Wallace is out or lunch. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
8960 I knew granite surfaces were trendy, but this isn’t how imagined finding the Sword in the Stone 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
8961 He tried a pen, but they kept breaking. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8962 He just wasn't up for the challenge. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8963 Does this mean there's been a shift in our corporate culture? 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
8964 It's the boss's new 'pull my sword' initiation. It replaces his old 'pull my finger' initiation. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8965 I heard whoever can pull the sword out the desk gets Pendragon’s office... 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8966 Is this King Arthur's desk or Trumps? 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8967 If you can pull it out of the desk, then you will prove your claim to the desk. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8968 "Don't try. It farts and says you're fired."c 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8969 I see Thor wasn't happy with the reports. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8970 When I said I wanted a sharp desk, I didn't mean this! 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
8971 Arthur baby, this is your last chance. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8972 ExCaliber: it's short for Executive Caliber. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8973 The Vegas Golden Knights have moved past hockey... 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8974 Did you see that new round table in the conference room? 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8975 You might like this office. It has a unique window that allows you to Etch a Sketch your own view. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8976 Looks like Arthur finally gave up his knight job. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8977 If you can get it out of there I guess you are king. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8978 Last week it was the comics, now it's folklores, next week Arthur will be writing detective stories. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8979 He lived by the sword and I guess...... 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8980 It's a granite desktop but it is not without its drawbacks. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8981 He did say this quarter's earnings were sordid. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8982 Quit? I guess he wasn’t the right fit for handling customer complaints. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8983 We're looking for someone who with the skills to extract and enhance the former Caliber of our work. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8984 'He's thankful justice is blind." 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8985 The legend states “The one who can pull the sword from the desk shall be the CFO who leads us through our ICO.” 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8986 Too bad about Smedley. He left his pen at home this morning. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8987 Excalibur?...I barely know her 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8988 Wh "He "He who removeth the sword, shall keepeth this corner office. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8989 I've decided against accepting the position CEO. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8990 I’d better reorganize my agenda. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8991 We're looking for someone with at least 10 years of experience, and is preferably named Arthur" 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8992 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk and this Tower, that holdeth all power, is rightwise President born. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8993 He said he wants us to get him a round desk 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8994 I think he’s taking another vacation to join his friends on another crusade. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8995 Whosever holds this sword, if he be worthy, shall possess the power of middle management 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8996 Conan gave us his two weeks notice. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
8997 Your predecessor, Mr. Arthur, had a flair for the dramatic. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8998 This is the last step of our interview process for a new CEO. The first candidate who manages to pull it out gets the job. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
8999 The message read; ye who may pull the sword may pass judgement. Funny how Ruth G failed yet still sits atop the throne. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9000 The first one to pull out the sword is made CEO. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9001 Henry has his own ideas about the CEO search. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9002 WHEN HE SAID HE WAS GONG TO THROW THE GAUNTLET DOWN, I GUESS HE MEANT IT" !! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9003 So far no one has managed it...anyway let’s see Mr Pendragon can do...bring him in 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9004 I support the New Yorker union. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9005 They say only the one true middle manager can claim the corner office. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9006 We’ve gone paperless, leadership worries about pens. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9007 Looks like the sword may be mightier 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9008 Hey Don Jr., ya' think if I pull it out I can be king next? 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9009 He originally had asked for a round work station. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9010 Pulling out that sword you put in your desk won't make you King, Donald. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9011 They say that he who draws the sword from out this desk shall be rightwise CEO. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9012 He's a magician in his spare time. After attempting to saw her in half he pulled a disappearing act. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9013 This is all just part of his King Arthur fixation. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9014 Apparently Sir Wallace didn't like the new assignment. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9015 It happened after the regulations were rolled back 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9016 I’m sorry, but all passwords must contain one uppercase and one special character. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9017 He who pulleth shall rule the board of directors 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9018 I assume that today’s meeting has been cancelled! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9019 *&$% Caliburn is never at his desk. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9020 If you can yank it out the office is yours. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9021 One of the perks of the position is the title 'Sir Arthur'. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9022 It's our CEO selection process. It may be medieval, but it works! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9023 Despite the liability concerns its a lot quicker, cheaper and less labor intensive than the traditional CEO search. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9024 Good thing Phil already has children. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9025 Quick! Go call Sir Lancelot and tell him to come here right away. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9026 They say whoever removes the sword from that desk is the rightful owner of Harriot And Sons. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9027 I didn't understand the harmful effects of Celiac Disease until I brought bagels to the office this morning. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9028 Legal says it's an EEO lawsuit waiting to happen. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9029 He's off to the Renaissance Faire again. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9030 Nobody is sharper than our CEO, Clyde the Slackers' Bane 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9031 So that's the intern test! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9032 Sadly, the pen is no longer more mighty than the sword. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9033 It’s the new business model. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9034 whoever pulls that sword out easily will be our next CEO 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9035 Looks like we should open up the interviews to the ME- TOO movement! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9036 We might want to rethink our succession plan ... 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9037 Excalibur or Twitter. They each makes him above the law. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9038 Many have tried and failed, yet I believe I will live to see the company's once and future burger king. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9039 Mort is in getting fitted for his crown. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9040 It's quicker than impeachment in some countries! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9041 Whosoever pulleth out the sword will be head of Accounts Receivable. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9042 Our HR department is pretty The HR Department sort of runs itself. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9043 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this stone and anvil is rightwise king born of all Accounting. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9044 Ahh yes, our Braveheart has gone home with a migrane. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9045 Let me guess, you brought Don Quixote in again." "Yeah, poor guy thought the desk was a dragon. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9046 The coroner said he hid under the desk when he heard screams in the hallway. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9047 He who can pull out the sword can come on board! 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9048 Good. They turned his desk into his coffin. He deserved it! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9049 Pull it out and you’re president of the company. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9050 Arthur, the note said if you pull this Excalibar sword out of the desk, you will be the head of this company! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9051 Corporate's growth strategies seem a bit medieval. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9052 Looks like another sleepless knight. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9053 I think she was going for a Sword in the Stone reference. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9054 Its an old tradition. Whoever draws forth the sword becomes CEO. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9055 The laptop's an IBM Thinkpad, but if you'd prefer a mac, we're happy to switch it out for you. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9056 Seems he was not the true ruler after all. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9057 Is King a paygrade above or below CEO? 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9058 Our recruiter is steeped in King Arthur. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9059 The last three candidates couldn't pull it out. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9060 "Oh my god. It even has a watermark..." - Patrick Bateman 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9061 We’re trying to cut office expenses 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9062 It's said, whoso pulleth this sword from yon corner-office desk shall henceforth be Vice President of Accounts. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9063 Whoever can pull it out is our new CEO. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9064 Whoso pulleth out this sword is rightwise middle management material. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9065 No one so far, but Ivanka is the favorite. we 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9066 I would but it's just not a good fit right now - too much responsibility. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9067 „Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise owner of this corner office.“ 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9068 Bagged that one at Coney Island, riding the carousel. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9069 Correction for johnfloydcampbell's entry: (add question mark) I know it's worked before, but isn't there a better way to find our next CEO? 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9070 Does boss look a little different today? I think his new haircut makes him look sharper. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9071 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise CEO of this company! Give it a go, Arthur. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9072 The sword is mightier than the keyboard. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9073 You can always tell when he's been listening to Die Walkure. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9074 They said he had ex-CEO caliber. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9075 The last applicant was very strong 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9076 Burying the hatchet wasn't in his nature. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9077 The bylaws state that if you pull the sword from the desk, you’ll be crowned chief executive officer. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9078 Finding an imaginary taxidermist proved to be quite difficult. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9079 I think I can guess what they're asking of the successful candidate. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9080 Contrary to popular opinion, Mr. Willcott believes the sword is mightier. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9081 Apparently his pen ran dry. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9082 They said the new Head of Recruitment is Merlin-something. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9083 Bob always called this his 'fairy tale job'... 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9084 It was a hostile takeover 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9085 Higgin's, I think we will need King Arthur for this 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9086 Who pulls it out becomes the new CEO. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9087 “Whoso pulleth this sword of this desk is rightwise CEO of this company.” Well, I suppose it’s a succession plan. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9088 That's quite a letter opener! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9089 OH!; that's for candidates for Board of Directors … 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9090 They really stuck it to the last guy. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9091 it s a much easier system than hiring a headhunter. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9092 The search committee has set the qualifications very high. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9093 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this IKEA desk, is rightwise Assistant Manager of the Hartford branch. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9094 I thought you said the pen is mightier? 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9095 After seeing Kind Arthur, what makes you so sure the sword will solve our leadership diversity problem? 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9096 Our CEO keeps it there to remind himself that people may honestly, truly, truly need the key for the bathrooms. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9097 I told her Nova Scotia was the best but she insisted on lox. 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9098 Whoever can pull it out gets the top job. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9099 Whoever can pull the sword out of that desk gets free parking for a week. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9100 Looks like d'Artagnan was down-sized. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9101 I guess they didn’t order Jerry’s round table. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9102 Arthur badly wanted that round table 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9103 You should see what he can do with a pen! 1.0500 0.05000 40 39 0 1
9104 So, about that promotion you wanted... 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9105 The message is clear; Don'T mess with the boys in the basement. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9106 We're looking for a worthy successor here at Excalibur Insurance. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9107 The new succession plan - whom ever can yield the sword from the CEO’s desk will be the next to rule Camelot Enterprises, Inc. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9108 Who let Jerry in? Why did they let Jerry in? 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9109 Oddly enough, he DID take his stapler and paper clips. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9110 Let the new CEO stakes begin! 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9111 Remove it and the position of actuarial manager is yours. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9112 What the shit Greg? What the actual? SHit? what the Fuck? 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9113 Apparently in his case, the sword was mightier than the pen. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9114 Whoever can pull the sword out gets ten more minutes at lunch to stare at their phone. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9115 It's a Las Vegas Golden Knights ticket promotion. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9116 Inform the team; our next CEO will be named Arthur 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9117 They say whoever pulls it out will get a one-percent raise. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9118 Looks like the BIC never had a chance. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9119 Whoever can pull it out gets to be CEO. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9120 I thought he was just a tough darts kinda guy...guess not. 1.0500 0.03490 40 38 2 0
9121 If you pull it out you get to be U.S. Attorney General. 1.0488 0.03406 41 39 2 0
9122 If you can pull it out, you're our new CEO 1.0488 0.03406 41 39 2 0
9123 Poor Arthur, sorry to see him go. 1.0465 0.03249 43 41 2 0
9124 We superglued the sword inside the desk and told all the unpaid interns that a career awaits whomever can pull it out. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9125 Finding the best regional manager is harder than you'd think. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9126 And that’s the sword that killed George Costanza. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9127 Yea...something about only he who removeth thy sword is worthy of the keys to the executive washroom.... 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9128 Well ,Arthur ,I said it wouldn’t be easy. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9129 King Arthur says we can't have our CEO back until he gets his Round Table 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9130 We thought we knew what he meant but the intern pulled it out. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9131 And whoever pulls it out gets blamed for the next data breach. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9132 So, think you can rule Camelot? 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9133 This is how you become King "Author". 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9134 Thou who pulls the sword from the desk will be employee of the month. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9135 We are going to beat Ziprecruiter at its own game 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9136 We use the only most traditional techniques to select a new CEO. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9137 They say that when the sword is removed we'll finally have a CEO who know's what they're talking about. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9138 Any woman could do it in a heartbeat. That's why we can't let them try. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9139 Come on Arthur, give it a try! Maybe you are meant to be our boss 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9140 Well, if he can pull it out, the board might back him. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9141 They say that whoever can pull the sword from the desk is henceforth rightfully and truly entitled to an enormous compensation package. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9142 It's something Merlin in the Search Committee came-up with for selecting our next CEO. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9143 Your right....we should of got our furniture from Ikea rather than the Renaissance fair 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9144 That sword makes whoever pulls it out the CEO, but first they must go through a long and complicated election system. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9145 Still better than the one with the Lady of the Water Cooler. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9146 I heard the interviews at King Arthur Flour were tough, but I didn't prepare for this. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9147 i see the board is going old school this time. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9148 You should see the CEO's letter opener. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9149 They're getting rid of algorithms and hoping this might work out better for everyone, but it's hell on the mahogany and HR feels cut out of the loop. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9150 According to legend, only the once and future director of human resources can remove it. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9151 Enough, I've had it. I'm throwin' in the towel. (And the sword.) 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9152 No one wants to pull it out -- you become the next White House chief of staff. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9153 Lol tite it's like a motif, you know, like, if you're good enough at managing our investments portfolio, you can pull that sword out lmao 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9154 Legend has it that whoso pulleth this sword from this desk is right wise the next member of the cabinet. None careth to try. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9155 Robert couldn't pull the sword out and be the new King Arthur...so he quit! 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9156 If you pull it out you become CEO and get some stock options. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9157 The boss wanted a "calorie burn" but accidentally typed "Caliburn".... so now anyone has the chance to be CEO. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9158 Last thing I heard was 'Excaliber Be Damned!' but he should be back for a 3pm meeting. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9159 The true King will pull the sword, but the true CEO will pull the golden parachute. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9160 No one is sure how he got it in there, but looks like Trump decided to put it back. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9161 You know, it probably is just as effective as the interview process. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9162 Webster left a note, "Went to help Jon Snow." Is Snow a client? 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9163 He who removes the sword shall have the role of CEO. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9164 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is right wise manager of this branch 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9165 He wasn't a king, he just hated that desk. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9166 No, not at all boss, we don't think you look like a sword. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9167 I preferred it when he let the "cat" out of the bag. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9168 Today we had a robust luncheon with the shareholders. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9169 Yes, he took the redundancy package, eventually. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9170 The boss’ll try to remove that, too, if he finds out the guy before him put it there. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9171 I think he gave up, but he put the flag on the wrong building. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9172 Perhaps the desk's recyclable composite wood is more sustainable than quarried stone? 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9173 It's for the Trump Kim meeting. Whoever pulls the sword out wins. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9174 We haven't found anyone who can pull the sword from the desk. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9175 The one who pulls it out inherits Trump Industries and all related lawsuits. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9176 He said he had to ask his wife for permission, and we haven't seen him since! 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9177 We're looking for someone with experience in pulling magic swords. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9178 It's Bob Mankoff's idea of humor. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9179 It's so much more effective than a paperweight. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9180 And this is Steve, we thought he said ‘Ex Halliburton’ turns out he’s ‘Excalibur’ but now we can’t get rid of him. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9181 Whoever can pull it out will be named CEO. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9182 We used to use the Rorschach Inkblot test 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9183 1) The Excalibur of his work was problematic, so we had to let him go. 2) He had a sworded history, so we let him go. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9184 Damnit, Arthur! You're an information technology specialist, not a boy king! 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9185 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise boss of all of the office. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9186 The President's job takes a special kind of strength. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9187 Always found Arthur a bit daft, but he went really barmy when they didn't give him a round table 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9188 Merl in HR said whoever pulls out the sword, gets the corner office. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9189 He screamed something about Excalibur, my ass, it was my ex-wife! 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9190 As a retiring CEO, he has a flair for the dramatic. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9191 "Don't pull on sword unless you're guaranteed a humongous Golden Parachute - maybe even Titanium." Message on computer. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9192 Whoever pulls it out sets the bathroom policy. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9193 Has the board ever considered hiring a CEO based on a candidate's qualifications and experience instead? 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9194 So, I see you’ve met the new guy, Arthur of Camelot. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9195 We had to remove the head of Sales from the office. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9196 And here we have the legendary ‘corporate personhood sword in the desk.’ 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9197 The position will be filled by the one with the power to pull the sword from the desk 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9198 Here at Arthur Andersen, we handle succession the old-fashioned way. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9199 For whoever can pull the sword Execaliber from the Marble Desk shell be the new Chief Executive Officer and owner of the Corporation. Do you want to give it a shot Mr, Arthur? 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9200 If you can pull the sword out you get to run the staff morale committee. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9201 Is Artie back from vacation yet? 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9202 They say that whoever draws it out will be CEO of all the corporation forever 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9203 Legend has it that he who removes the sword from Arthur's desk shall be the next C.E.O. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9204 If you can pull it out you get the office and the job but they say that the charges for the damage to the desk will suck up all the financial gain. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9205 It is foretold that whoever removes the sword from the desk will become our next CEO. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9206 We're looking for a new CEO with guns. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9207 I'll talk to our cleaning team again. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9208 Because of budget cuts, we had to give him the ax, but because of further budget cuts, we could only afford to give him the sword. 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9209 They decided to remake Wall Street as part of the King Arthur Cinematic Universe 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9210 I didn't think much of the knife thrower - that's the closest he ever came to hit the boss even once 1.0278 0.02817 36 35 1 0
9211 I should warn you, Jim, we have a pretty strict ‘no hiding under desks’ policy. 1.0270 0.02740 37 36 1 0
9212 Great, that kid Artie from the mail center is going to be our next boss. 1.0270 0.02740 37 36 1 0
9213 Sir Galahad he ain't. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9214 No, it's not a statement. He uses it to carve roasts at the corporate picnic. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9215 I'm not going to try. You try. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9216 They who remove the sword is the rightful heir to this great view 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9217 You've passed all of the interviews. Now if you can pull it out, you'll be the next CEO of Burger King. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9218 It's our final step in CEO appointment. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9219 Who farted? 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9220 A novelty petition. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9221 Arthur wanted the office to know it was his desk. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9222 This is a different kind of temp agency. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9223 Does he think he's King Arthur? 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9224 Must've been some really hardcore porn. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9225 I just need something for Heather's ten-year sheet cake. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9226 ...and whoever pulls it out gets this corner office. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9227 The corporate trainer said to come to work with a sharp caliber, not excalibur 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9228 Legend says that whoever removes the sword will become powerful beyond measure. And totally racist. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9229 Whoever can pull it out becomes the new CEO. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9230 He was really unhappy with that desk! 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9231 You should see where he keeps his pen. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9232 Interesting; he did say he was going out last night for either sushi or a dinner theatre with a medieval theme. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9233 The rightful CEO will be able to free the sword. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9234 There's one more task before you host the daily roundtable meeting 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9235 First one to pull it out gets to sit there. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9236 And management wonders why we never let down our guard. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9237 Whomever can pull it from the desk gets to be CEO. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9238 The stone desks are nice. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9239 Withdraw the sword, and the whole office is yours. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9240 One final test and the job here at Merlin & Knight is yours. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9241 The worthy person who can pull the sword, Excalibur, out of the desk, shall become our Lord and CEO for life. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9242 "Your caliber's not important -- only Excalibur". 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9243 DNC Headquarters: We're just hoping the right person will come. So far, they've all been too short. 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9244 There I was......this THING coming straight at me.........I raised my gun....... 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9245 WOW - if you pull out that sword you get to be the next CEO! 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9246 He must’ve had the Caesar salad 1.0263 0.02667 38 37 1 0
9247 Only he who is exceedingly evil of heart and vile of spirit, can pull the sword from this desk, and be the one true head of Human Resources! 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9248 Arthur is out of the office right now, but he'll pull your sword on his return. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9249 Yes, Merlin said whosoever pulleth out this sword will be the new assistant manager. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9250 The King has arrived. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9251 Do we have anyone who can create an app for that? 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9252 Arthur asked for a ROUND table for his office. Threw a bit of a tantrum when he didn't get his way. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9253 Put in by new Owner Every desk hass one. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9254 It's the standard "Pull the sword from the desk and become CEO" agreement but in other ways we've kept up with the times: car, private jet, penthouse in the city, and we upgraded from the glass Excalibur with the new legislation. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9255 Told you he was sharp 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9256 It's the final test before becoming CEO. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9257 Whoever can pull it out will be the next king of H.R. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9258 Assume responsibility and you profit in the takeover. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9259 Is this one of those magic tricks where he's folded in half under the desk? 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9260 Requirements to get a job these days: pull out the Excalibur sword from an office desk 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9261 Don't say a word about this. It's Fake News. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9262 If you can pull the sword out of the desk, the job is yours. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9263 Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise Middle Management. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9264 I guess Elon must have stepped out 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9265 "If you can pull it out, the office is your's.".... 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9266 I told them , "I quit larping." 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9267 You don't pull it out. It's there in case we have another staff reduction. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9268 Do you think that's Excalibur? 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9269 Whoever can pull it out becomes president. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9270 It is prophesied that the new CEO will pull the sword from the desk. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9271 This is how they pick CEOs, if you can remove it from the desk - bingo. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9272 Not everyone can qualify for this position. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9273 I hear it has something to do with the board's succession planning process. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9274 He who pulleth out this sword shall be rightful manager of the Akron branch. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9275 Legend has it, "whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk is rightwise CEO. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9276 The graph indicates that his business went bankrupt and that he failed at killing himself. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9277 OMG, The Sword of Power. I dare say,promotions are becoming more difficult. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9278 The company has been dealing with an image problem for a long time. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9279 Maybe I can wait to be king. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9280 Whoever frees the sword gets to be CEO! 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9281 According to myth, it can only be removed by the kingdom's most creative accountant. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9282 Wait till you see rhe Riund Table. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9283 I guess Art wanted a round table. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9284 He who is able to pull this sword from this desk will become CEO of the company. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9285 Merlin's beard! The Trump sword! Why won't anyone even try to pull it from the party platform? 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9286 The last guy couldn't hack it, as you can see. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9287 Just think. One of us will pull it out and become president of the Damocles Company. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9288 We aren’t a normal ad agency here at Fambler & Woomstein. We know how to have fun. On Friday, we cut our dicks off with a Lord of the Rings replica sword. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9289 He really is a man of many talents but he’s taking this riddle thing way too far!!! 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9290 I wish Arthur would just use his letter opener. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9291 You’ll be on probation; how long is up to you. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9292 Well it beats a poke in the eye. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9293 Sure, it’s been a long search. But even the best business school doesn’t teach the type of skill set we’re looking for. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9294 You have seniority so I suggest you look under the desk. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9295 Yes, Arthur, if you can pull that sword out of the desk, the job of CEO is yours. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9296 No, actually it was 'free with Prime.' 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9297 Here's where most of the administrative activities take place. You won't be seeing much of it. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9298 Isn't it supposed to be round? 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9299 This could be interesting. I put a call into OSHA. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9300 He said he was going to slash the budget, but he lost control. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9301 King Arther must be out to lunch 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9302 The last CEO wasn't satisfied with his compensation package. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9303 Quick, call Arthur! 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9304 The last guy couldn't cut it. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9305 They said the AI would accomplish more than Arthur... 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9306 His name was Galahad but for the Board he was holier than grail. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9307 We at King Arthur Flour have a slightly different approach to selecting a CEO. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9308 Kay's out....we're waiting for Arthur 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9309 Alright Johnson, here's the last part of the interview. We need to see if you're the kind of excalibur 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9310 This is a police matter. This is a police matter. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9311 According to the new code, whoso pulleth out this sword, evadeth pass-through taxation 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9312 Yes, you heard right. It's the famous "Deskalibur". Remove the sword from the desk, and you become our new CEO. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9313 We are trying out a new CEO succession plan here at Wilson and Smith, LLC. If you can pull the sword out of the desk, the job is yours, Peterson. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9314 It's the letter opener for the really big personal letter from Kim Jong In. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9315 We really ought to call Arthur..I understand he's handled this kind of thing before. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9316 We're looking for the perfect fit. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9317 I am not font of these memos in Excalibur. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9318 Extricate Excalibur and that CEO position is yours 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9319 He who pulls the sword may replace the CFO. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9320 If only this applied towards creating a Twitter account... 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9321 Well, now. Harry’s only reachable on LinkedIn ... 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9322 If I can pull it out, will it mean I’m the reigning CEO? 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9323 Disgruntled former employee. 1.0256 0.02598 39 38 1 0
9324 IT YOUR TURN,GIVE IT YOUR BEST 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9325 I guess the sword is winning right now. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9326 HE'S SEEN "CAMELOT" TOO MANY TIMES. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9327 We told him not to deny Arthur his loan” “How long is that sword?” “Long enough to upset his wife 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9328 It's really just a drop in the bucket to him. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9329 We need be a better system for recouping company swords. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9330 I guess Arthur wasn’t our true CEO. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9331 If he can pull it out he makes it CEO. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9332 He insists on choosing his own replacement. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9333 Competition for that corner office is going to be Arthurian. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9334 The desk isn’t even round. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9335 Behold, the mark of the the outsourced termination consultant. Winter is coming. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9336 If I pull it out, I'm the CEO. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9337 Must be a secret passage of some sort. Or he got bored of working. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9338 Young man, remove the sword from the slightly battered steelcase before thee, and thou shalt be the lord of accounting! 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9339 HR says that whoever can pull it out is our next CEO. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9340 Mr. Stone -- he had to be the one who put the"squire" in "Esquire," didn't he? 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9341 Legend says whoever removes the sword shall get a 401(k) matching contribution. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9342 The shame of being his desk was too much to bear. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9343 Apparently, No-one wants to be President. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9344 Yes, old Art was always a stickler for tradition. 1.0250 0.02532 40 39 1 0
9345 Arthur's been out sick. 1.0238 0.02410 42 41 1 0
9346 The boss says that we're just going to wait and see what happens. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9347 Legend has it that Uther was fired for sexual harassment claims 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9348 He certainly left a deep mark on our company. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9349 They claim it's a meritocracy, but they only care about one thing. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9350 Time to get medieval on those quarterly reports. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9351 HR has raised its standards for the skill level of our employees. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9352 I don’t recall this being in our procedure manual. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9353 Whoso pulleth the sword from the desk shall forwardly be known as Metrics facilitator. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9354 Guess he went back to Camelot whence he came. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9355 When I told Tom to 'stab through his work,' I did not mean this. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9356 He who can pull it out will become CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9357 It's just a little formality that we run our CEO candidates through. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9358 Looks like the desk of Excalibur 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9359 I wonder who is heir to the throne? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9360 And if you pull the sword from the desk, you become the new CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9361 Give it a try - if you can pull it out you get the corner office and company shares. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9362 They don't make desks like they used to. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9363 I hear we are hiring an Arthur 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9364 Only the once and future CEO can save the company. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9365 His dying words were: 'The pen IS mightier!" 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9366 I heard he does really high excalibur work. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9367 Ever hear the legend of the "Once and Future CEO"? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9368 Legend has it that Wilson naps under his desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9369 HR takes sexual harassment very seriously. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9370 We still haven't found anyone who can pull it and prove themselves worthy of VP Marketing 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9371 I know it's an unconventional interview, but he won't speak to you unless you can pull it out. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9372 Whoever is able to remove the sword from the desk becomes our new Vice President of Human Resources. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9373 Don't let any unpaid interns in here; if one of them pulled it out the company would be screwed. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9374 PLEASE DON'T BRING YOUR KID NEXT TIME 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9375 I guess he thought it was his desk's fault ... 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9376 I TOLD you Damocles wouldn't get axed. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9377 Whoever can pull it out becomes CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9378 These days very directorship comes equipped for hari -kari. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9379 The boss is a believer in saber metrics. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9380 Is Tom still upset about us getting rid of butter in the breakroom? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9381 We can ask Gene. He had leg day yesterday. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9382 The C.E.O. doesn’t like competition 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9383 Get me Arthur from the mail room. Then order a round desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9384 Our company uses a traditional test to place management trainees. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9385 With our new simplified application process, we will know you are the right man for the job if you can remove the sword. Give it a go, Arthur. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9386 The board was deadlocked after the candidate interviews. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9387 How about that kid named Arthur in accounting? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9388 Word is whoever pulls it out is the new chairman. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9389 He believes he is King Arthur. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9390 In hindsight, medieval Mondays did not boost m 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9391 And that's when the Mountain made it very clear that he will not be returning for the next season of Game of Thrones. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9392 The most important things to remember are never wear shorts and make sure your tetanus shots are up to date. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9393 This is our accountant, Arthur’s office. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9394 Well Bill, if you pull it out of the desk, you get to be CEO. One chance. Then, I'm asking Arthur the intern 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9395 You've got the best shot at this job, Wart. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9396 A Rabbi Smaltz brisk was aways a splashy affair. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9397 i hope George isn't under the desk 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9398 We don’t want you to think of it as a “warning”, but we did write “Charlie’s Back” on that hilt. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9399 Barb isn't happy about your promotion. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9400 We think Arthur was worried about taking time off. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9401 Legend has it... 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9402 Do you think that sword on the desk is the one he wanted us to get? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9403 You'll be replacing the VP who bet against Damocles... 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9404 Whoever can pull the sword gets Friday off. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9405 That’s really all the Chief knows how to do. Everyday he comes in here and just brags for hours how great he is because he’s the one that did it. That’s it. Nothing else. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9406 I don’t think I can handle another re-org. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9407 Methinks our CEO, Arthur Pendragon, has been slain by #metoo 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9408 Only the anointed CEO can pull it out. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9409 No, Edger pulling Excalibur from the desk is the easy part. To become Camelot Corp CEO you must win ownership of this antiquity by vanquishing the British Museum and other claimants in pending litigation. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9410 The Sword in the Stone goes corporate. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9411 . . . and this is where we find our next CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9412 So, you can have the job if you can pull the sword out ... 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9413 it is curtains for us if Trump pulls this out 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9414 We've chosen to interview our next CEO by using the Excalibur method. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9415 Get ready for the 'Let me show you why I'm the boss.' 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9416 Our janitor, Myrddin, appears to be having a bit of fun. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9417 "Whoever removes the sword shall be the right-born H.R. Supervisor. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9418 Mr. Merlin must have watched "The Sword and the Stone" again last night. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9419 Merlin, there has to be a better way to decide. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9420 Whoever removes the sword will become the next chairman of the board. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9421 This was Uther Pendragon's office. It's been vacant ever since he died. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9422 Whosoever extracts the sword becomes CEO for posterity! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9423 He wanted a round table. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9424 The warranty says its sharpness is at least X-caliber. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9425 We use this mostly for a bit of entertainment. The sword goes down seven floors. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9426 You and Jones both said that this position belongs to you, so we found a compromise. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9427 ...And this is the office of our Quality Control Manager, Merlin. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9428 It's for the once and future vice president. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9429 I told you we shouldn't have let Artie go. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9430 And whomever manages to draw the sword from the desk becomes the new CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9431 Just show you can fix the problem first, then you get the job. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9432 Slumped .. thumped ! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9433 so, all you heard was "tag, your it" and this is what you found? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9434 I think he's angry it's not a roundtable. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9435 The legend follows the life of Donald in how it was prophesied that the true ruler of would be able to pull the sword from the Stone, amongst some locker room talk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9436 The mew Company CEO failed to pulleth out this sword of this desk and was banished to the mail room. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9437 They say that whoever can pull it out will be the new head of accounting 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9438 Arthur was upset the table isn't round, so he quit. I guess the job will go to whoever can pull the sword from the desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9439 At Monmouth and Arthur, the sword is mightier. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9440 They say that whoever pulls the sword from the desk shall have dominion over all HR. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9441 Didn't happen so she's cleaning closets instead. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9442 We’re programmers. I guess we’ll never have another CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9443 The client wasn't happy about yesterday's ruling in the Round Table lawsuit. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9444 If I pull that out...... do I get the company? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9445 Our president just loves fairy tales 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9446 ...and this is professor Merlin's office. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9447 We're still looking for a new CEO for Excalibur Corp. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9448 Our partner had a fit when his Golden Knights lost the Stanley Cup in Vegas. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9449 But we already elected a King! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9450 Excalibur 2018. the new CEO extracts the sword 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9451 The consultants again--executive search, simplified. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9452 Have you heard about the new succession plan? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9453 We should have given Arthur time to clear his desk before we let him go. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9454 Artie's ex is staying put right there until he gets back, trust me. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9455 Boss said, "whoever gets the sword out gets an extra vacation day." 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9456 You'll be in the cubicles unless you can lift this sword. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9457 So he’s not the heir to the British throne but he’s still our boss. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9458 This is the CEOs succession plan. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9459 I told you Billy was a Viking. Those people always leave swords just lying around everywhere. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9460 Well, it looks like Arthur's getting promoted. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9461 The boss is always saying he who passes the sentence swings the sword. Welcome to the company! He’ll be back for it this afternoon. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9462 Oh, no, but there is a bonus package associated 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9463 Does this guy really think he's Sir Galahad and the Holy Grail is his desk? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9464 He was working under cover. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9465 It was a really big salad. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9466 Legend says that whoever can pull the sword from the mahogany desk will become CEO for as long as the company remains profitable. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9467 Arthur always preferred a round table. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9468 Interesting interview technique for the next CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9469 Legend has it whoever pulls the sword from the desk gets a 3% bonus next quarter 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9470 Art wasn’t sure about this job interview. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9471 The CEO role at Excalibur, LLC has been vacant too long. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9472 Let's leave it for that new guy, Arthur. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9473 Whosoever pulleth it out will get their 401k contributions matched by the company. Otherwise, it works as a Bluetooth mouse, so that's pretty neat. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9474 The new sword in the stone 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9475 Tell Artie King there is a delivery for him. And it looks real sharp. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9476 Apparently, “whosoever removeth this sword is hereafter CEO.” 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9477 He pulls this with every new VP, he’s just down the hall taking a leak! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9478 “I see that the Board is using the Camelot group to select the new CFO”. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9479 CEO challenge 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9480 Looks like “Executive Time” is over. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9481 Per ancient legend shall I pull out the sword to see show I am indeed the true leader? Wait ... who needs This test, I am pretty I just dodge a death threat!!!! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9482 You killed yourself? The one time I wish it wasn't fake news. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9483 If your FICO score is high enough that desk is yours. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9484 I have a feeling he won the lottery. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9485 Arthur says he'll give the corner office to anyone who can pull the damn thing out of his desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9486 Do you think pulling is easier than pushing?" "Whatever way, he tried hard. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9487 This is your chance to prove yourself CEO worthy! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9488 I told Artie the job was his if he could remove it. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9489 I saw on your application, your middle name is Arthur. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9490 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this stone and anvil is duly born King of all burgers. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9491 I’m afraid the president has never contented himself with a figurative chopping block. Speaking of, I’m going to need a printed copy of the Iran deal by this afternoon. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9492 The pen fled the interview 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9493 Bill...Do you believe in destiny? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9494 The new HR guy is really old school. Ye who removeth the sword shall be new Assistant Marketing Director for Southern New Jersey. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9495 Guinevere cried, "Me too!" - and left in a hurry. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9496 They are only interviewing men called Arthur. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9497 So if we take out the sword do we get the job? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9498 In Steven's case, the sword was mightier. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9499 ...Thor? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9500 Pull it out and you get to use the round desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9501 The succession planning is in place...now we wait. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9502 Remove Excalibur and prove you are worthy to rule the rank and file 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9503 The carving on the desk said: "He who pulls the sword from the desk will become the real CEO of Trump Industries. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9504 Wow, Drake still hasn't shown back up to the office after Pusha T's lyrical slaying. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9505 As a symbolic gesture protesting our open office plan, it doesn't make any sense. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9506 We're waiting for the next one true Steve Jobs. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9507 Per Ms. Lake's rules, if you can pull the sword, you can lead the company. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9508 Now it's your turn to be CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9509 Instead of emailing, she made her statement crystal clear 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9510 Whoever can pull out the sword is the new CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9511 Conan took the exit offer? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9512 Am I the Chosen One? If I pull the sword out... then I will be the New King of the M&K Law Group… I’ll just let Bob do it. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9513 ...and this desk is used for swording documents. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9514 The first one to pull it out gets the bonus. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9515 You'll also be Chairperson of the Sword. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9516 Solidarity Forever! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9517 A flour company as old and prestigious as ours has to be very particular in choosing our next CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9518 That is a fine exhibit of a Caliber X sword! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9519 Whoever said 'the pen is mightier than the sword' definitely never worked here. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9520 And this is the office of J.P. Morgan la Fay. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9521 He took it very badly when he didn't get his knighthood. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9522 He's only Vice President, but he doesn't hide the fact that he has higher ambitions. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9523 Well, yeah you'd think someone would've pulled it out and won this office by now, but they keep getting distracted trying to win that building's entire 37th floor. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9524 The job is never boring. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9525 I thought the table was supposed to be round 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9526 And, this is our new performance review system 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9527 Sorry, but we're cutting back on severance. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9528 In DC don't hide under your desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9529 HR says we need to find a Sir Lancelot. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9530 HR has not been able to find anyone who may credibly state that "the sword has been passed to the next generation". 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9531 It awaits the true CEO. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
9532 ...so this is Merlin's office, but he's currently out to lunch with a new client, King Arthur... 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9533 He must have downsized the CEO position after abysmal quarterly earnings. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9534 It might not be constructive, but at least I got feedback — I think. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9535 Whoso pullets out this sword from this desk, is right wise star of The Apprentice. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9536 Many a CEO has tried, but none can pull out the sword. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9537 I mean she did say she had a surprise at the office for me... 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9538 So if he pulls the sword out , will he get to be King? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9539 The only real expense in finding a new CEO is replacing the desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9540 My granddaughter told me they were real, but I didn’t believe her until I bagged this one on my last trip to the Mystical Mountains. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9541 The person who pulls out the sword must sit at this desk for the rest of his life. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9542 They say if you pull it out, you can represent us at the next congressional hearing 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9543 Oh I forgot, Artie’s out of the office til Tuesday. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9544 They say whoever pulls it out gets to be middle-management. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9545 A radical concept from the share holders - adding a skill to the list of qualifications in the CEO selection process. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9546 GDPR says we need a data protection officer, so the board of directors set up a skills test. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9547 This is the Crisis Counselor's office. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9548 Didn't anyone tell the boss to use a pen instead? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9549 The glue should last long enough for the next poor sap to take the fall for us. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9550 He who can pull the Sword from the Desk shall run this company. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9551 It doesn’t look like anyone has qualified to be the new boss yet. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9552 We prefer our time tested approach to executive recruitment. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9553 Well, it's neither Herculean nor Kafkaesque 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9554 You will be taking over Mr. Jones office, in charge of anger management! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9555 I need to get that workspace on my desk back and they say only the one true executive assistant can remove the sword. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9556 It is rumored that he who can remove the sword shall hit his sales quota. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9557 One thing you can say for the boss. He made a clean break. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9558 I always appreciated the s-wordplay in his emails 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9559 It was the last cutting remark which sent him to prison. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9560 The lawyers said we had to do background checks. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9561 Bully for fly-by-knight leverage companies. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9562 We tried; let Arthur pull it out. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9563 We just can't find anyone worthy enough. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9564 As in the best companies, it's a hand job to the top. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9565 Arthur is on his way down from HR. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9566 ah, the old dagger-in-the-desk test. they say the person who can remove it cleanly gets the corner office. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9567 Until the sword is pulled from the desk, the position will remain open. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9568 This is Mr. Merlin's office. Mr. Merlin can be cranky. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9569 and someday, son, this office will be yours if.... 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9570 Welcome to your office...the previous ex pulled out his back and got stoned with opioid pain addiction meds. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9571 Legend has it that this office will be claimed by the one who can withdraw the sword. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9572 At this newspaper, forget the pen thing—profits matter. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9573 If you want this office, you're going to have to convince Art from accounting that you deserve it. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9574 The new janitor, Arthur I think he said, says he'll yank that eye sore out on Monday and the desk'll be good as new for the boss's kid. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9575 "King Arthur os on vacation this week.i 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9576 It's a beautiful office but people feel there's a stigma attached! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9577 So , where do you see yourself in this company in five years, Arthur? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9578 Arthur has a lot to live up to. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
9579 One could say HR enjoys their work a tad much 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
9580 It's like the olden days, you pull it out successfully you run the company 1.0000 0.01081 93 93 0 0
9581 Better call Artie from Accounting. 1.0000 0.01047 96 96 0 0
9582 HR said that the message was too personal to be delivered by email. 1.0000 0.00930 108 108 0 0
9583 Whoever removes Excaliber from the desk is the true CEO. 1.0000 0.00830 121 121 0 0
9584 It's the boss' new idea for a succession plan 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
9585 Uther Pen-Zuckerberg almost pulled it out. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
9586 Just raising the bar a bit for the next CEO. 1.0000 0.00810 124 124 0 0
9587 If I pull it out, will I be the next president? 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
9588 His replacement is still M.I.A 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
9589 Merlin in HR says if you pull out the sword you get the promotion, but you pay for the desk. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
9590 It seems Arthur was a bit miffed. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
9591 Whoever pulls it out gets three weeks paid vacation. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
9592 Whoever pulls out the sword becomes the CEO. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
9593 This is not what I meant when I said "you will be working nights at the roundtable." 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
9594 Remember to address him as 'Arthur.' 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
9595 The previous employee certainly left his mark in this company. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
9596 Job placement at the Excalibur Corporation 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
9597 I fear big budget cuts are looming 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
9598 old technology but still the sharpest. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
9599 there is a sword stuck in the bosses's desk Steve. 1.0000 0.01143 88 88 0 0
9600 I guess he just couldn't cut it any more. 1.0000 0.01143 88 88 0 0
9601 Welcome to Burger King. 1.0000 0.01170 86 86 0 0
9602 I guess this means that Arthur did not get the promotion that he was after! 1.0000 0.01170 86 86 0 0
9603 Whoso pulleth out this sword from this desk is right wise king of this office. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
9604 In cos play, you're always King Arthur. So get it out of there. 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
9605 They're bringing back the old "if you pull it out, you're the boss" hiring strategy. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
9606 The views are killer. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
9607 So that's why no one is officially in charge of accounts receivable. The next office is yours. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
9608 Progress from Cowardly Knight Sullivan; perhaps tonight he'll 'honor' us with a sallet peek. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
9609 The view from this office is epic. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
9610 And that, my friend, is the only way to become a CEO or a CE Anything around here. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
9611 The first person to remove the sword gets this office. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
9612 He Sword (aka Swore) it was just for show! 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
9613 If you can pull this sword out, you'll be king...of this office! 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
9614 I fear he's been reading Sir Walter Scott again. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
9615 He's been called away to avenge something our competition is doing. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
9616 No, the board isn’t looking for a specific ???????? of CEO. They’re looking for ?? specific executive. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
9617 The job is yours Arthur if you are the true master of Microsoft Excelibur. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
9618 According to legend whoever pulls it out is named Deputy District Implementation Supervisor. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
9619 Whoever can withdraw the sword is the next ceo. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9620 Your predecessor, Arthur, couldn't remove it, so he never got the keys to the executive washroom. 1.0000 0.01504 67 67 0 0
9621 Yes, Trump's desk tends to be less cluttered. When Obama was here the desk had a jar of organic Dove poo, some red sand and love notes from Assad and Khamenei, the Nobel Peace Prize, a pen and a phone, and a rusted train caboose. 1.0000 0.01325 76 76 0 0
9622 This will be your final test for the CEO position. 1.0000 0.01274 79 79 0 0
9623 So, the search for a new CEO begins. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
9624 If you can remove the sword, you'll becomes my executive personnel henchman and your first assignment will be cutting out my disingenuous staff. Consider it a test of loyalty and you'll need it to defend yourself. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9625 Looks like Arty is transferring back. Conditionally. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9626 We've moved on the from "The Lady in the Lake" recruiters. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9627 Only the one true Salesperson of the Year can wield it. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9628 So, Arthur, this is our initiation desk here at Excalibur. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9629 yea that possessed mixed race baby i stabbed through the desk dissappeared, i didnt know he had the power to turn into smoke, this is going to be a problem 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9630 Pull that out and the job's yours. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9631 That's a little too Arthurian, don't you think? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9632 I heard he was practicing the tai chi sword maneuvers. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9633 He or she who's able to pull it out, becomes our rightful CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9634 He's going to be hard to replace. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9635 Should we pull it out before Arthur gets back? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9636 Pull out Excaliber and the middle management job is yours. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9637 It'll take a Yank with pull. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9638 Our CEO couldn't even manage to fall on his sword the right way 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9639 Whoever gets the letter opener out of the desk gets the golden parachute. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9640 If you like this desk ornament you should see the headhunters. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9641 Arthur hated our rectangular office tables. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9642 Obviously, King Arthur is on vacation this week. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9643 Pull the sword and you’re the next CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9644 Merlin is trying his magic trick again. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9645 The theses were in an e-mail. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9646 He who can remove it will successfully decipher this administration's trade policy 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9647 Old Merl did not take his retirement lightly. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9648 Only the CEO can pull it out. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9649 and now my son...for your final task u must shove this up ur ass 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9650 She was calibrating her divorce figures when her ex walked in. The rest is history. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9651 Okay, give him the job! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9652 Should we look under the desk or wait for the janitor? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9653 The vorpal blade went snicker - snack. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9654 So this is your idea of how we're going to choose a new boss? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9655 Opportunities for advancement? ‘Whoso pulleth out this sword of this desk, is rightwise CEO born.’ 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9656 Whoever pulls this out gets to be Mayor! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9657 Whoever can pull it out of the desk becomes the next CEO and his wife will have an affair with the young hunk in Marketing. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9658 If you pull it out, do you become the C.E.O.? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9659 Pull it out and you will be the next Ceo of Excalibur Inc. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9660 It was his way of saying, “Take this job and shove it!” 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9661 You look under the desk! No you! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9662 They say that only one person is worthy of the chair. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9663 I was hoping to pull it out, but I guess I'll stick with my 401-K. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9664 Yes the Board voted for you, but there's one more test. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9665 Remove it and the job is yours. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9666 Pull that out and you can be president. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9667 I guess the Board is tired of reading C.V.s. Whoever can remove it is the next CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9668 She’ll appreciate our thoughtfulness 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9669 I heard Larry say if you can pull it out, you become CEO for life. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9670 Why did Arthur choose a used granite desk? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9671 I suspected that Smithers was a backstabber but, I didn’t think he was this inept. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9672 Legend has it that only the true Cost Accountant IV will be able to take the sword from the desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9673 If you can pull the sword out of the desk you will be king! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9674 Pull the sword from the desk and you get to lead Lehman Brothers back to life. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9675 Go on Arthur... pull it out; see if you get promoted. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9676 It's our new selection test for CEO 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9677 Merlin stuck it in. What would he charge to let me pull it out? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9678 Go on. Give it your best shot. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9679 You’ve cleared the drug screening, the resume auto-filter, 2 HR interviews, and the group interview. All that’s left is to pull the sword from the desk and be crowned the king of Organizational Efficiency. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9680 Looks like Arthur's going through that "delusions of grandeur" thing again. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9681 C'mon Arthur, if the summer interns can yank it out, so can you. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9682 This will determine who will be the resulting CEO after the merger. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9683 Human Resources shot down this idea for advancement a little too late. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9684 It’s their typical Friday afternoon request. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9685 Only the true CEO can pull this one off. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9686 If I pull it out will I be the king? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9687 If Alexander the Great took the first job offer 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9688 Ivanka, Junior, and um, Eric, if you tell the biggest lie, you can lift that sword right out of the desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9689 Merlin or merlot? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9690 His last message was "Excalibur". 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9691 It looks as if the budget cuts have eliminated funding in programs, services and staff. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9692 He did NOT fall on his sword.... 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9693 So if this is the promotion announcement, my reader is scary good. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9694 Apparently, only a real "bastard" can get it out of the desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9695 His next company is going to be the stuff of Arthurian legend. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9696 Much like his performance, Lowcaliber. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9697 I'm just worried about their liability shield. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9698 Yeah, it all started when we bought a round table for the conference room. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9699 They say if you pull it out you become the next CEO. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9700 Maybe we should get Arthur in accounting 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9701 I heard you get a corner office if successful. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9702 If you can remove it, the job and corner office are yours. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9703 in order to move up here, you have to put your time in under the desk 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9704 Clark has gone all Sir Galahad, but I assure you the damage to his desk will be deducted from his paycheck. His expense account also lists questionable charges for a cross dresser “Genevieve.” Didn’t I tell you he wasn’t meant for office work? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9705 I got passed over for promotion but Arthur's a shoe in. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9706 To be the next boss, all you need to do is pull the sword out of the desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9707 They say Garrett from accounting is going to try next. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9708 Just yesterday he told me that when the 2nd quarter results come in hide under my desk! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9709 The Mr. Murdock has implement a classic 6 century succession plan, very Brexit. But HR thinks the candidate pool will be somewhat limited. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9710 Whoops, looks like Bill left his laptop open. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9711 I've finally cut the cord. Farewell. King Arthur. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9712 The pen is mightier than the sword. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9713 Your new boss dressed as a superhero rabbi at out office Halloween party. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9714 i think he was always obsessed with star wars maybe his wish came true 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9715 Some special day the future king of CEO's will walk up to that sword and pull it clean away from ole Rock Murphys desk. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9716 The Sunken Sword, Moving Right Along 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9717 The budget cuts are becoming more visible 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
9718 Hey, man, if Trump can be president, why not give it a try? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0