These captions are chosen by The New Yorker.
Name | Value |
---|---|
Submission deadline | 2018-05-20T18:49:00.000Z |
Voting started | - |
Voting ended | 2018-06-10T19:05:00.000Z |
Finalists announced | 2018-05-28T18:49:00.000Z |
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued | June 4th & 11th, 2018 |
Number of captions | 8154 |
Number of responses | 895011 |
Number of participants | - |
In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.
Rank | Caption | Mean | Precision | Total votes | "Unfunny" votes | "Somewhat funny" votes | "Funny" votes |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
0 | But before we head down... a short fire-safety video... | 1.9780 | 0.01260 | 4097 | 1379 | 1429 | 1289 |
1 | No, this is Purgatory. Hell has FOX 24/7. | 1.9548 | 0.01183 | 5025 | 1884 | 1484 | 1657 |
2 | I wonder if he moved that pitchfork a little left would we get better reception? | 1.9031 | 0.01121 | 4832 | 1723 | 1854 | 1255 |
3 | No, purgatory. In hell, it's Fox News 24/7. | 1.8910 | 0.01235 | 4522 | 1832 | 1351 | 1339 |
4 | It gets worse. The commercials are for air conditioning. | 1.8807 | 0.01174 | 4368 | 1607 | 1675 | 1086 |
5 | It's either this or the PBS pledge drive. | 1.8729 | 0.01161 | 4768 | 1873 | 1628 | 1267 |
6 | I didn’t know there would be an orientation video. | 1.8625 | 0.01598 | 2299 | 854 | 907 | 538 |
7 | It's not really eternal - if you watch closely it's a forty-five minute loop. | 1.8586 | 0.01535 | 2454 | 907 | 987 | 560 |
8 | I hear the 1% get real fire... | 1.8513 | 0.01190 | 4540 | 1846 | 1523 | 1171 |
9 | This is boring as hell. | 1.8421 | 0.01358 | 3369 | 1355 | 1191 | 823 |
10 | No, only the Catholics have real flames. We’re all Episcopalians. | 1.8412 | 0.01134 | 4793 | 1917 | 1720 | 1156 |
11 | Is it wrong to say you look hot? | 1.8350 | 0.01583 | 2503 | 1025 | 866 | 612 |
12 | He wants to make Hell great again. | 1.8328 | 0.02652 | 909 | 379 | 303 | 227 |
13 | Good news! If this were hell, they'd be showing Fox News. | 1.8326 | 0.01674 | 2264 | 939 | 765 | 560 |
14 | This is it? Well, I'll be damned! | 1.8287 | 0.01334 | 3491 | 1434 | 1221 | 836 |
15 | I guess it didn't really matter if I had on clean underwear after all. | 1.8278 | 0.01203 | 4379 | 1830 | 1473 | 1076 |
16 | No, you ask him to change the channel. | 1.8203 | 0.01165 | 4379 | 1766 | 1634 | 979 |
17 | They've been making due with this ever since the place froze over in 2016. | 1.8164 | 0.01286 | 4117 | 1849 | 1175 | 1093 |
18 | One channel, one show, no remote, welcome to hell! | 1.8090 | 0.01366 | 3262 | 1364 | 1157 | 741 |
19 | So this is ironic... last week I was standing next to a fire and watching naked people on TV. | 1.8082 | 0.01196 | 4415 | 1898 | 1466 | 1051 |
20 | It's a live feed from the White House. | 1.7947 | 0.01697 | 2314 | 1057 | 675 | 582 |
21 | It gets worse. In February they start showing reruns of The Apprentice. | 1.7853 | 0.01459 | 2879 | 1257 | 983 | 639 |
22 | Sometimes he changes the channel to Hannity | 1.7832 | 0.02414 | 1033 | 447 | 363 | 223 |
23 | We only get two stations. Fire and Brimstone. | 1.7765 | 0.01225 | 3982 | 1734 | 1404 | 844 |
24 | Did you give to the Trump campaign, too? | 1.7760 | 0.01507 | 2821 | 1290 | 873 | 658 |
25 | We're all Congressional staff. White House is two circles down. | 1.7720 | 0.01281 | 3825 | 1735 | 1227 | 863 |
26 | The last thing I remember was accepting a White House appointment. | 1.7680 | 0.01306 | 3689 | 1687 | 1171 | 831 |
27 | 666 channels and nothing is on. | 1.7604 | 0.02333 | 1156 | 535 | 363 | 258 |
28 | So this is hell - a 15-inch screen, rabbit ears and no clicker! | 1.7463 | 0.01607 | 2235 | 1000 | 802 | 433 |
29 | The cable guy said he'd be here between now and eternity. | 1.7452 | 0.01428 | 3010 | 1405 | 967 | 638 |
30 | Well the ride in the hand basket was fun | 1.7410 | 0.01342 | 3402 | 1597 | 1089 | 716 |
31 | In heaven they have flat screens. | 1.7361 | 0.02105 | 1296 | 588 | 462 | 246 |
32 | Wow, turns out stealing cable IS a big deal. | 1.7323 | 0.01679 | 2021 | 918 | 726 | 377 |
33 | I can never tell the news from the weather. | 1.7265 | 0.01481 | 2581 | 1180 | 927 | 474 |
34 | ...and then, when he said, 'You have a choice: It's either the flames of hell, or Fox News', well, that was a no-brainer. | 1.7258 | 0.01352 | 3479 | 1714 | 1005 | 760 |
35 | Hell hath no cable. | 1.7202 | 0.02321 | 1090 | 515 | 365 | 210 |
36 | Wish I hadn't pulled the tag off our mattress. | 1.7125 | 0.01519 | 2619 | 1276 | 820 | 523 |
37 | In heaven they have flat screens. | 1.7021 | 0.01584 | 2189 | 1024 | 793 | 372 |
38 | The irony is that I'm here for stealing cable. | 1.6938 | 0.01322 | 3246 | 1569 | 1102 | 575 |
39 | And after this, we have to watch 14 seasons of The Apprentice. | 1.6872 | 0.01395 | 3130 | 1595 | 919 | 616 |
40 | So, you're a lawyer too? | 1.6869 | 0.01391 | 3005 | 1491 | 964 | 550 |
41 | There sure are a lot of white people down here! | 1.6843 | 0.01731 | 2027 | 1036 | 595 | 396 |
42 | 666 channels and nothing to watch. | 1.6819 | 0.01393 | 2968 | 1476 | 960 | 532 |
43 | The Bible made this sound a lot worse. | 1.6749 | 0.01547 | 2227 | 1073 | 805 | 349 |
44 | When I first got here, we could only listen to the fire on the radio. | 1.6737 | 0.01548 | 2409 | 1216 | 763 | 430 |
45 | I really hate it when they give everything away in the previews. | 1.6711 | 0.06204 | 149 | 75 | 48 | 26 |
46 | At least it's a dry heat. | 1.6709 | 0.02463 | 951 | 482 | 300 | 169 |
47 | This is purgatory. Down there, they show reruns of The Apprentice. | 1.6701 | 0.01824 | 1767 | 907 | 536 | 324 |
48 | It's either this or the PBS pledge drive. | 1.6700 | 0.01458 | 2706 | 1372 | 855 | 479 |
49 | Nine circles of hell, and we get stuck in the one without cable. | 1.6606 | 0.01578 | 2201 | 1103 | 742 | 356 |
50 | Yes, but its a dry heat. | 1.6588 | 0.01549 | 2339 | 1191 | 755 | 393 |
51 | Do we really need a 24 hour weather station down here? | 1.6507 | 0.01588 | 2276 | 1189 | 693 | 394 |
52 | If one more person says, “At least it’s not FOX.”.... | 1.6428 | 0.01787 | 1786 | 942 | 540 | 304 |
53 | This training video is taking an eternity. | 1.6403 | 0.01770 | 1793 | 942 | 554 | 297 |
54 | The Devil Wears Nada. | 1.6399 | 0.02070 | 1430 | 788 | 369 | 273 |
55 | I'd sell my soul for Netflix right now....oh wait.... | 1.6344 | 0.02143 | 1231 | 655 | 371 | 205 |
56 | "And it only plays Fox news". | 1.6342 | 0.02311 | 1110 | 606 | 304 | 200 |
57 | Hey, at least it's not Hannity. | 1.6284 | 0.02461 | 923 | 493 | 280 | 150 |
58 | Do you believe he can make Hell great again? | 1.6240 | 0.02009 | 1476 | 821 | 389 | 266 |
59 | He makes us watch this fire safety video once a year. | 1.6215 | 0.01986 | 1424 | 771 | 421 | 232 |
60 | No, we're in Purgatory. This is just a trailer. | 1.6212 | 0.01951 | 1407 | 744 | 452 | 211 |
61 | Cool! They have Hell-To-Pay-Per-View. | 1.6193 | 0.02613 | 830 | 453 | 240 | 137 |
62 | Yes, but its a dry heat. | 1.6182 | 0.02031 | 1349 | 731 | 402 | 216 |
63 | Back in the old days we had real fire. | 1.6174 | 0.02496 | 839 | 441 | 278 | 120 |
64 | This orientation video is taking forever. | 1.6172 | 0.02065 | 1335 | 733 | 380 | 222 |
65 | I've seen this episode before. It doesn't end well. | 1.6143 | 0.02586 | 783 | 414 | 257 | 112 |
66 | Yes, I'm sure we're in hell--black and white, no cable, one channel, and no remote. | 1.6141 | 0.02120 | 1275 | 706 | 355 | 214 |
67 | It becomes hell when they switch to Trump's press conference. | 1.6133 | 0.02135 | 1262 | 701 | 348 | 213 |
68 | On the plus side, there's no ads. | 1.6124 | 0.02420 | 841 | 433 | 301 | 107 |
69 | I'd kill again for a recliner. | 1.6123 | 0.02146 | 1189 | 645 | 360 | 184 |
70 | In the 9th circle, I hear it's just "Hannity" on a loop. | 1.6106 | 0.02232 | 1207 | 689 | 299 | 219 |
71 | It's the weather report. | 1.6087 | 0.02191 | 1168 | 645 | 335 | 188 |
72 | There's only one channel, but liberals see Fox, and conservatives see MSNBC. | 1.6083 | 0.02240 | 1177 | 668 | 302 | 207 |
73 | I don't understand...all I did was vote for Donald Trump. | 1.6078 | 0.02286 | 1160 | 668 | 279 | 213 |
74 | Yeah, it's hot, but I've heard the second season is even hotter. | 1.6076 | 0.02100 | 1157 | 611 | 389 | 157 |
75 | It’s pretty much just this and Hannity. | 1.6076 | 0.02271 | 1157 | 661 | 289 | 207 |
76 | He's trying to reduce his carbon footprint. | 1.6055 | 0.02823 | 697 | 385 | 202 | 110 |
77 | I think the only way to get through this is to imagine everybody with their clothes on. | 1.6040 | 0.02164 | 1106 | 592 | 360 | 154 |
78 | False idols. And you? | 1.6015 | 0.02211 | 1064 | 573 | 342 | 149 |
79 | One channel and no remote? This is really Hell. | 1.6002 | 0.02266 | 1053 | 579 | 316 | 158 |
80 | At least it's not Fox News. | 1.5992 | 0.02380 | 1033 | 592 | 263 | 178 |
81 | So television really is the tool of the devil | 1.5960 | 0.02397 | 990 | 562 | 266 | 162 |
82 | These timeshares are always a scam. | 1.5937 | 0.03270 | 507 | 282 | 149 | 76 |
83 | The only programming we get down here is Fox News and the eternal fire. We leave it on the fire. | 1.5928 | 0.02482 | 948 | 548 | 238 | 162 |
84 | If I’d known that this is all it amounts to, I would’ve killed your mother right off the bat. | 1.5919 | 0.02506 | 941 | 548 | 229 | 164 |
85 | I knew we shouldn't have removed the mattress tag. | 1.5916 | 0.02459 | 928 | 527 | 253 | 148 |
86 | Is this it or are we in the waiting room? | 1.5908 | 0.02556 | 782 | 425 | 252 | 105 |
87 | Well, what do you know. It turns out that Hell was fake news! | 1.5905 | 0.02469 | 928 | 530 | 248 | 150 |
88 | Well, I'll be damned! | 1.5905 | 0.02489 | 923 | 530 | 241 | 152 |
89 | Do you dare me to tell him we’ll get better reception if he raises that pitchfork a bit? | 1.5879 | 0.02482 | 859 | 477 | 259 | 123 |
90 | They use to show us FOX News, but even they thought that was cruel and unusual punishment. | 1.5876 | 0.02563 | 890 | 519 | 219 | 152 |
91 | It's hotter in HD. | 1.5855 | 0.02480 | 825 | 451 | 265 | 109 |
92 | Dante would be so embarrassed. | 1.5840 | 0.02551 | 851 | 486 | 233 | 132 |
93 | We've done it this way since it froze over. | 1.5828 | 0.02585 | 839 | 483 | 223 | 133 |
94 | What’s the point of a fire-safety video? | 1.5822 | 0.02572 | 833 | 476 | 229 | 128 |
95 | Boy I hate these workplace training videos. | 1.5806 | 0.02583 | 763 | 421 | 241 | 101 |
96 | Of course, everyone has the option to upgrade to Premium Hell. | 1.5801 | 0.02542 | 805 | 449 | 245 | 111 |
97 | Typical. 9 Circles of Hell and nothing on. | 1.5771 | 0.02592 | 785 | 443 | 231 | 111 |
98 | The Devil Wears Nada. | 1.5750 | 0.02784 | 767 | 460 | 173 | 134 |
99 | We’re waiting for Sarah Huckabee Sanders to take the podium. | 1.5733 | 0.02765 | 750 | 443 | 184 | 123 |
100 | This is just the weather channel. If you complain, they send you down to watch political coverage. | 1.5722 | 0.02805 | 741 | 442 | 174 | 125 |
101 | Orientation videos are a waste of time. | 1.5682 | 0.02685 | 704 | 396 | 216 | 92 |
102 | I hate being the devil's advocate, but I am kind of chilly. | 1.5667 | 0.02628 | 697 | 384 | 231 | 82 |
103 | Is that Morgan Freeman's voice? | 1.5665 | 0.02796 | 692 | 402 | 188 | 102 |
104 | You expected real flames? There are way too many lawyers down here for that kind of liability! | 1.5653 | 0.02770 | 681 | 390 | 197 | 94 |
105 | We only get local stations | 1.5647 | 0.02789 | 680 | 392 | 192 | 96 |
106 | I’ll be damned. Hell really is having 500 channels with nothing worth watching. | 1.5618 | 0.02814 | 655 | 376 | 190 | 89 |
107 | With all the Comcast employees down here, you'd think we'd get better reception. | 1.5594 | 0.02916 | 640 | 377 | 168 | 95 |
108 | I understand this is just until the boiler gets fixed. | 1.5594 | 0.02770 | 640 | 360 | 202 | 78 |
109 | Another scorcher tomorrow. | 1.5565 | 0.02901 | 620 | 360 | 175 | 85 |
110 | On the bright side, half the people here are from the cable company. | 1.5559 | 0.02992 | 617 | 368 | 155 | 94 |
111 | They said we’d only need to listen to the talk for an hour before we had full access to the resort. | 1.5548 | 0.02934 | 611 | 357 | 169 | 85 |
112 | When they really want to punish us, they switch it to White House press conferences. | 1.5539 | 0.02992 | 603 | 357 | 158 | 88 |
113 | Before we get started please observe a short video which will help you discover that there is no nearest exit. | 1.5539 | 0.02927 | 603 | 350 | 172 | 81 |
114 | I don't know about you, but standing naked with a bunch of strangers while watching the news go up in flames is not my worst day. | 1.5537 | 0.02824 | 605 | 341 | 193 | 71 |
115 | I guess the Devil wears nada. | 1.5532 | 0.03042 | 602 | 362 | 147 | 93 |
116 | I knew if we voted for him we'd all go to hell. | 1.5522 | 0.03101 | 603 | 370 | 133 | 100 |
117 | The Meet Up Group read, 'hot, nude, adult entertainment.' I think I had something else in mind. | 1.5522 | 0.02932 | 594 | 344 | 172 | 78 |
118 | The picture looks like hell. | 1.5518 | 0.03057 | 589 | 353 | 147 | 89 |
119 | We're literally in virtual hell. | 1.5513 | 0.02986 | 575 | 334 | 165 | 76 |
120 | These welcome videos take an eternity. | 1.5504 | 0.02957 | 585 | 340 | 168 | 77 |
121 | I can’t believe we all used to work at the White House. | 1.5500 | 0.03056 | 580 | 346 | 149 | 85 |
122 | This is just a commercial. Hannity's next. | 1.5485 | 0.03130 | 567 | 343 | 137 | 87 |
123 | I always took it as hyperbole when customers used to say there is a certain place in hell for people who run cable companies. | 1.5483 | 0.03072 | 569 | 339 | 148 | 82 |
124 | The only other channel is brimstone. | 1.5477 | 0.03002 | 566 | 330 | 162 | 74 |
125 | Ever the optimist, Carl pointed out that they were dressed perfectly for the climate. | 1.5471 | 0.02961 | 563 | 324 | 170 | 69 |
126 | At least it’s not the Kardashians. | 1.5464 | 0.03048 | 560 | 330 | 154 | 76 |
127 | He keeps it tuned to world news to show us how good we have it down here. | 1.5464 | 0.03048 | 560 | 330 | 154 | 76 |
128 | Break’s over. Ten years of Fox News coming up. | 1.5459 | 0.03254 | 555 | 346 | 115 | 94 |
129 | Get ready everybody, He’s on his way to make Hell great again. | 1.5459 | 0.03204 | 555 | 341 | 125 | 89 |
130 | It only plays Fox News. | 1.5453 | 0.03278 | 552 | 346 | 111 | 95 |
131 | Hell! Another rerun! | 1.5441 | 0.03084 | 544 | 321 | 150 | 73 |
132 | I knew it would be bad, but I never dared imagine rabbit ears. | 1.5440 | 0.02975 | 546 | 313 | 169 | 64 |
133 | It's still better than Fox news | 1.5428 | 0.03144 | 538 | 322 | 140 | 76 |
134 | Ironically, I’m here for watching videos of naked people. | 1.5421 | 0.03113 | 535 | 317 | 146 | 72 |
135 | Cheer up. One level below us all they have to watch is Hannity. | 1.5414 | 0.03237 | 532 | 326 | 124 | 82 |
136 | I hear heaven has a flat-screen. | 1.5414 | 0.03126 | 532 | 316 | 144 | 72 |
137 | Apparently it's better for the environment. | 1.5395 | 0.03079 | 519 | 302 | 154 | 63 |
138 | Is this your first Trump rally? | 1.5395 | 0.03423 | 519 | 332 | 94 | 93 |
139 | I bet they have a flat screen in heaven. | 1.5393 | 0.03118 | 521 | 307 | 147 | 67 |
140 | Jerry Falwell was wrong about a lot if things. | 1.5388 | 0.03177 | 516 | 308 | 138 | 70 |
141 | Turns out, there is a special place for all who ignored the final PBS pledge drive. | 1.5388 | 0.03247 | 516 | 314 | 126 | 76 |
142 | A crowd gathers to watch the ever-popular "Face The dam-Nation." | 1.5373 | 0.03194 | 510 | 305 | 136 | 69 |
143 | Maybe if he turned his trident a skosh to the left? | 1.5373 | 0.03170 | 510 | 303 | 140 | 67 |
144 | That's why they call it Hell. We only get Fox News here. | 1.5373 | 0.03289 | 510 | 313 | 120 | 77 |
145 | I'd sell my soul for the remote. Again. | 1.5368 | 0.03153 | 503 | 296 | 144 | 63 |
146 | It only plays Fox News. | 1.5365 | 0.03280 | 507 | 310 | 122 | 75 |
147 | This orientation is taking an eternity. | 1.5346 | 0.03128 | 492 | 286 | 149 | 57 |
148 | The other channel is Fox News. | 1.5344 | 0.03408 | 494 | 310 | 104 | 80 |
149 | One day you're working for Fox News and then suddenly.... | 1.5343 | 0.03349 | 496 | 307 | 113 | 76 |
150 | It's all fake news since hell froze over. | 1.5328 | 0.03490 | 488 | 312 | 92 | 84 |
151 | I’m really not supposed to be here, I’m an agnostic. | 1.5320 | 0.03216 | 485 | 288 | 136 | 61 |
152 | There's no remote. What else do you need to know about Hell? | 1.5312 | 0.03255 | 480 | 287 | 131 | 62 |
153 | At least there are no pledge drives... | 1.5312 | 0.03187 | 480 | 282 | 141 | 57 |
154 | These overflow rooms never really capture the mood. | 1.5304 | 0.03243 | 477 | 284 | 133 | 60 |
155 | What did I miss? | 1.5304 | 0.03270 | 477 | 286 | 129 | 62 |
156 | Somehow, it never seems real until you see it on TV. | 1.5298 | 0.03299 | 453 | 268 | 130 | 55 |
157 | Not so bad. I thought we’d have to watch Fox. | 1.5289 | 0.03405 | 467 | 288 | 111 | 68 |
158 | At least it's not tuned to Fox News. | 1.5280 | 0.03326 | 464 | 280 | 123 | 61 |
159 | Didn't think I would be staring at a screen all day down here too. | 1.5280 | 0.03284 | 464 | 277 | 129 | 58 |
160 | Guess who owns the media. | 1.5272 | 0.03311 | 459 | 275 | 126 | 58 |
161 | I expected fire and brimstone, but never fake news. | 1.5253 | 0.03245 | 455 | 268 | 135 | 52 |
162 | Fox News: Giving hope to the damned since 2016. | 1.5237 | 0.03446 | 443 | 272 | 110 | 61 |
163 | At least he doesn't make us watch Sean Hannity. | 1.5237 | 0.03505 | 443 | 276 | 102 | 65 |
164 | He's trying to reduce his carbon footprint. | 1.5236 | 0.03536 | 445 | 280 | 97 | 68 |
165 | I hate orientation. | 1.5235 | 0.03257 | 447 | 263 | 134 | 50 |
166 | If this is really hell they'd be showing 'Apprentice' reruns. | 1.5235 | 0.03495 | 447 | 279 | 102 | 66 |
167 | It's just not the same as being there. | 1.5235 | 0.03408 | 447 | 273 | 114 | 60 |
168 | Yep, every channel. | 1.5226 | 0.03331 | 442 | 264 | 125 | 53 |
169 | You'd think with the corporate tax cuts they could afford a flat screen down here. | 1.5206 | 0.03458 | 436 | 268 | 109 | 59 |
170 | So far, it's just been 4,000 years of waiting for the cable guy. | 1.5198 | 0.03517 | 429 | 266 | 103 | 60 |
171 | Oh look, FOX news. | 1.5197 | 0.03625 | 431 | 275 | 88 | 68 |
172 | If I’m being honest, this is actually one of the better orientation videos I’ve seen. But then again ... being honest isnt really my thing. | 1.5197 | 0.03363 | 431 | 258 | 122 | 51 |
173 | I suppose this means we're not going to get internet down here either. | 1.5189 | 0.03321 | 424 | 250 | 128 | 46 |
174 | Well, the training video seems relatively straightforward. | 1.5188 | 0.03360 | 426 | 254 | 123 | 49 |
175 | We’re singe watching. | 1.5177 | 0.03524 | 423 | 262 | 103 | 58 |
176 | Nothing's ever on, but I hear we're getting Cosby soon. | 1.5177 | 0.03410 | 423 | 255 | 117 | 51 |
177 | That reminds me - did you turn off the stove? | 1.5177 | 0.03377 | 423 | 253 | 121 | 49 |
178 | Great, another time share presentation that will last an eternity. | 1.5172 | 0.03356 | 435 | 262 | 121 | 52 |
179 | I thought there’d be more tattoos. | 1.5167 | 0.03491 | 418 | 256 | 108 | 54 |
180 | I didn’t think there’d be an orientation. | 1.5167 | 0.03424 | 418 | 252 | 116 | 50 |
181 | Showing a safety video before we enter seems like overkill. | 1.5157 | 0.03443 | 415 | 251 | 114 | 50 |
182 | We get 187 channels. But they're all Fox News. | 1.5157 | 0.03672 | 415 | 265 | 86 | 64 |
183 | Fox 24-7 and no remote. | 1.5157 | 0.03624 | 415 | 262 | 92 | 61 |
184 | It could be worse - at least we're not on the phone with the cable company. | 1.5157 | 0.03322 | 415 | 244 | 128 | 43 |
185 | It's just like everything else these days - instead of actually burning in hell, you experience it on reality T.V. | 1.5157 | 0.03322 | 415 | 244 | 128 | 43 |
186 | Season five seems like it goes on for eternity. | 1.5147 | 0.03487 | 408 | 248 | 110 | 50 |
187 | The guy with the pitchfork has the remote, but try getting it from him. | 1.5146 | 0.03352 | 410 | 242 | 125 | 43 |
188 | Have you noticed that no one here has a tattoo? | 1.5146 | 0.03508 | 410 | 251 | 107 | 52 |
189 | Before the cutbacks the flames were real. | 1.5135 | 0.03579 | 407 | 253 | 99 | 55 |
190 | Well, I was right. Hell IS watching Fox News. | 1.5125 | 0.03712 | 400 | 255 | 85 | 60 |
191 | I'm more bothered than I am hot. | 1.5124 | 0.03383 | 402 | 238 | 122 | 42 |
192 | Is this your first Trump rally? | 1.5113 | 0.03685 | 399 | 253 | 88 | 58 |
193 | Eternal damnation I can handle, but no cable is just plain cruel. | 1.5113 | 0.03546 | 399 | 245 | 104 | 50 |
194 | Oh No. Not the pledge drive again. | 1.5102 | 0.03701 | 392 | 248 | 88 | 56 |
195 | God IS merciful! I thought I was going to have to watch Trump. | 1.5102 | 0.03719 | 392 | 249 | 86 | 57 |
196 | I was the president's former press secretary. What are you in here for? | 1.5090 | 0.03666 | 387 | 242 | 93 | 52 |
197 | If I knew there was no cable, I would have led a better life. | 1.5090 | 0.03573 | 387 | 237 | 103 | 47 |
198 | I used to make orientation videos like this. Now I see why I'm down here. | 1.5090 | 0.03615 | 389 | 241 | 98 | 50 |
199 | We only get the weather channel. | 1.5090 | 0.03527 | 391 | 238 | 107 | 46 |
200 | It’s what we get for watching Fox. | 1.5078 | 0.03727 | 386 | 245 | 86 | 55 |
201 | If this is all they've got, we might as well get back to sinning. | 1.5065 | 0.03601 | 383 | 236 | 100 | 47 |
202 | Apparently, that’s the forecast for the rest of eternity. | 1.5065 | 0.03466 | 383 | 229 | 114 | 40 |
203 | Brimstone is on after this | 1.5065 | 0.03620 | 383 | 237 | 98 | 48 |
204 | First time at Burning Man? | 1.5065 | 0.03620 | 383 | 237 | 98 | 48 |
205 | How ironic. Lots of nudity, but no cable. | 1.5053 | 0.03709 | 376 | 236 | 90 | 50 |
206 | When the sponsor break is over, it goes back to Fox News. | 1.5053 | 0.03785 | 376 | 240 | 82 | 54 |
207 | I know, it really feels like you're there. | 1.5053 | 0.03559 | 378 | 230 | 105 | 43 |
208 | You think this is bad, wait until he switches to the news. | 1.5053 | 0.03637 | 378 | 234 | 97 | 47 |
209 | I told you it was one of those timeshare scams. | 1.5040 | 0.03629 | 371 | 228 | 99 | 44 |
210 | It's not the same as being there. | 1.5040 | 0.03713 | 373 | 234 | 90 | 49 |
211 | No, it's not the orientation video...This IS Hell... | 1.5040 | 0.03520 | 375 | 226 | 109 | 40 |
212 | It’s the fork! Perfect picture everytime he stands there. | 1.5040 | 0.03830 | 375 | 242 | 77 | 56 |
213 | I guess we all thought hot singles in your area meant something very different. | 1.5040 | 0.03625 | 377 | 233 | 98 | 46 |
214 | I'm actually good with this. You know upstairs they are watching Sean Hannity. | 1.5027 | 0.03766 | 366 | 231 | 86 | 49 |
215 | Great, another "fireside chat." | 1.5014 | 0.03647 | 363 | 223 | 98 | 42 |
216 | This is the 8th circle. In the 9th circle you have to deal with the cable company. | 1.5014 | 0.03750 | 363 | 228 | 88 | 47 |
217 | No remote, no cable, and just one local station? I'll be damned. | 1.5014 | 0.03911 | 365 | 238 | 71 | 56 |
218 | So you voted for him too huh... | 1.5014 | 0.03892 | 365 | 237 | 73 | 55 |
219 | According to the orientation video, it’s a dry heat. | 1.5000 | 0.03533 | 358 | 214 | 109 | 35 |
220 | I bet you never thought you'd miss your cable company. | 1.5000 | 0.03438 | 362 | 213 | 117 | 32 |
221 | I know we lied, but setting our pants on fire seems petty. | 1.4986 | 0.03692 | 357 | 221 | 94 | 42 |
222 | Looks like another day of record temperatures. | 1.4986 | 0.03649 | 357 | 219 | 98 | 40 |
223 | This or Fox News, your choice. | 1.4986 | 0.03892 | 353 | 227 | 76 | 50 |
224 | Brimstone comes on after this. | 1.4972 | 0.03779 | 354 | 223 | 86 | 45 |
225 | At least we're not watching the Kardashians for eternity. | 1.4972 | 0.03838 | 352 | 224 | 81 | 47 |
226 | Everyone's relieved when they first arrive, but after it a while it gets to be as boring as hell. | 1.4972 | 0.03731 | 352 | 219 | 91 | 42 |
227 | I bet the One Percenters get to burn in HD. | 1.4972 | 0.03817 | 352 | 223 | 83 | 46 |
228 | The hottest places in Hell are now reserved for Congress, so it's standing room only in the waiting lounge. | 1.4972 | 0.03709 | 352 | 218 | 93 | 41 |
229 | Is anyone else a little cold? | 1.4957 | 0.03733 | 349 | 217 | 91 | 41 |
230 | And next month it's 'The Apprentice'. | 1.4957 | 0.03777 | 349 | 219 | 87 | 43 |
231 | This really isn't my idea of "Making Hell Great Again". | 1.4957 | 0.03682 | 347 | 213 | 96 | 38 |
232 | I don’t know why we even bother. The 7-day forecast has not changed in forever. | 1.4957 | 0.03771 | 347 | 217 | 88 | 42 |
233 | Great, another one of his crappy home movies... | 1.4942 | 0.03796 | 344 | 216 | 86 | 42 |
234 | Spoiler alert. | 1.4942 | 0.03862 | 344 | 219 | 80 | 45 |
235 | Here, we only get flames. For Fox News, you need to go down more levels. | 1.4942 | 0.04096 | 344 | 230 | 58 | 56 |
236 | This is a commercial. Otherwise it's Fox News, 24 /7. | 1.4941 | 0.03760 | 340 | 211 | 90 | 39 |
237 | With all the billionaires down here, you'd think they'd spring for a plasma. | 1.4941 | 0.03760 | 340 | 211 | 90 | 39 |
238 | No, the TRULY damned are in the real hell. We're VIRTUALLY damned. | 1.4941 | 0.03919 | 340 | 218 | 76 | 46 |
239 | The regular guy is out sick, so we're just watching a video today. | 1.4926 | 0.03698 | 339 | 208 | 95 | 36 |
240 | It's a repeat. | 1.4925 | 0.03963 | 335 | 216 | 73 | 46 |
241 | I’ve seen this one. Everyone dies in the end. | 1.4910 | 0.03857 | 334 | 211 | 82 | 41 |
242 | Better reception than I expected. | 1.4910 | 0.03607 | 332 | 199 | 103 | 30 |
243 | It will be a cold day in hell before we get cable down here. | 1.4910 | 0.03779 | 332 | 206 | 89 | 37 |
244 | Who the hell voted for the weather channel? | 1.4909 | 0.03747 | 330 | 203 | 92 | 35 |
245 | It could be worse, I hear in the next Circle down they have to watch Fox News! | 1.4894 | 0.03812 | 331 | 207 | 86 | 38 |
246 | This is just the preview for us new arrivals. In real Hell he makes you watch Fox News. | 1.4894 | 0.04022 | 331 | 216 | 68 | 47 |
247 | That's it? I should have had more fun. | 1.4894 | 0.03883 | 331 | 210 | 80 | 41 |
248 | I expected fire and brimstone, but “FOX and Friends” is overkill. | 1.4893 | 0.03966 | 327 | 210 | 74 | 43 |
249 | Don’t you think we can skip the instructional video? We all know why we are here. | 1.4877 | 0.03705 | 326 | 199 | 95 | 32 |
250 | The only other option was Fox News. | 1.4877 | 0.03952 | 326 | 209 | 75 | 42 |
251 | Look on the bright side—it's not PowerPoint. | 1.4877 | 0.03830 | 326 | 204 | 85 | 37 |
252 | I think the book is better. | 1.4877 | 0.03904 | 326 | 207 | 79 | 40 |
253 | These cooking shows are all the same. | 1.4877 | 0.03806 | 326 | 203 | 87 | 36 |
254 | No, it's just the orientation video. | 1.4877 | 0.03855 | 326 | 205 | 83 | 38 |
255 | Could be worse. Could be FOX News. | 1.4877 | 0.04089 | 324 | 213 | 64 | 47 |
256 | There are certain advantages to being in the overflow section. | 1.4876 | 0.03764 | 322 | 198 | 91 | 33 |
257 | They usually just make us watch Fox News. | 1.4876 | 0.04224 | 322 | 217 | 53 | 52 |
258 | I hear in Heaven they get Netflix. | 1.4858 | 0.03961 | 317 | 202 | 76 | 39 |
259 | Purgatory isn’t that bad, in Hell they have commercials. | 1.4858 | 0.03911 | 317 | 200 | 80 | 37 |
260 | He’s reducing his carbon footprint. | 1.4842 | 0.03868 | 316 | 198 | 83 | 35 |
261 | It used to be a loop of Trump's inauguration. | 1.4842 | 0.03945 | 316 | 201 | 77 | 38 |
262 | Make Hell Great Again | 1.4842 | 0.04021 | 316 | 204 | 71 | 41 |
263 | The real torture is that they hide the batteries for the remote | 1.4842 | 0.03627 | 316 | 189 | 101 | 26 |
264 | I think you're hot. | 1.4840 | 0.03851 | 312 | 194 | 85 | 33 |
265 | "You're fired" takes on a whole new meaning here, huh? | 1.4821 | 0.03951 | 307 | 194 | 78 | 35 |
266 | The cable guy's supposed to be here sometime between 8am and eternity. | 1.4821 | 0.04084 | 307 | 199 | 68 | 40 |
267 | That’s the point; there is no remote. | 1.4821 | 0.03924 | 307 | 193 | 80 | 34 |
268 | If the Bible had said there would be no remote for the TV, I'd have been in church every Sunday. | 1.4821 | 0.03701 | 307 | 185 | 96 | 26 |
269 | We've been ordered to watch re-runs of "The Apprentice". | 1.4803 | 0.03841 | 304 | 188 | 86 | 30 |
270 | I hate these timeshare presentations. | 1.4785 | 0.04070 | 303 | 196 | 69 | 38 |
271 | The First Circle gets cable. | 1.4785 | 0.03878 | 303 | 189 | 83 | 31 |
272 | Fox canceled it, but Hell picked it up for another season. | 1.4785 | 0.03906 | 303 | 190 | 81 | 32 |
273 | I thought the devil wore Prada. | 1.4785 | 0.04097 | 303 | 197 | 67 | 39 |
274 | Who has the remote? | 1.4784 | 0.04064 | 301 | 194 | 70 | 37 |
275 | Do you find the laugh track a little creepy? | 1.4784 | 0.03953 | 301 | 190 | 78 | 33 |
276 | The channel changer is in heaven. | 1.4765 | 0.04230 | 298 | 198 | 58 | 42 |
277 | One channel? This IS hell. | 1.4765 | 0.04010 | 298 | 190 | 74 | 34 |
278 | Could be worse. In the next circle they have to watch Fox News. | 1.4762 | 0.04191 | 294 | 193 | 62 | 39 |
279 | Its a shame fox is the only channel down here | 1.4762 | 0.04301 | 294 | 197 | 54 | 43 |
280 | I could have done without the orientation video. | 1.4762 | 0.03934 | 294 | 184 | 80 | 30 |
281 | If we're good, they let us watch the White House Press briefing. | 1.4762 | 0.03993 | 294 | 186 | 76 | 32 |
282 | It’s been a century, would it kill him to change it to the smoldering ember channel? | 1.4762 | 0.04022 | 294 | 187 | 74 | 33 |
283 | This is the orientation video. | 1.4762 | 0.04022 | 294 | 187 | 74 | 33 |
284 | For good intentions. You? | 1.4746 | 0.04097 | 295 | 191 | 68 | 36 |
285 | I thought the book was scarier. | 1.4744 | 0.03914 | 293 | 183 | 81 | 29 |
286 | You're lucky, he used to do a PowerPoint. | 1.4744 | 0.04060 | 293 | 188 | 71 | 34 |
287 | At least it won’t carry ads for erectile disfunction. | 1.4744 | 0.04118 | 293 | 190 | 67 | 36 |
288 | If you wanted cable, you should have led a better life. | 1.4744 | 0.03914 | 293 | 183 | 81 | 29 |
289 | I never thought I'd find myself praying for commercial breaks. | 1.4740 | 0.03892 | 289 | 179 | 83 | 27 |
290 | It's amazing we still get Fox News down here. | 1.4740 | 0.04102 | 289 | 186 | 69 | 34 |
291 | And that's the weather forecast forever. | 1.4740 | 0.04102 | 289 | 186 | 69 | 34 |
292 | I'm actually relieved. I thought we’d be watching cable news. | 1.4740 | 0.03953 | 289 | 181 | 79 | 29 |
293 | I saw this one before. It does not end well. | 1.4740 | 0.03861 | 289 | 178 | 85 | 26 |
294 | You can tell it's Fake Hell. If it were Real Hell, Fox News would be on tv. | 1.4740 | 0.04302 | 289 | 193 | 55 | 41 |
295 | Before the budget cuts we used to have real flames. | 1.4722 | 0.04112 | 288 | 186 | 68 | 34 |
296 | Told you they wouldn't have cable. | 1.4718 | 0.03972 | 284 | 178 | 78 | 28 |
297 | Black and white? This really is damnation. | 1.4718 | 0.03844 | 284 | 174 | 86 | 24 |
298 | The actual fire just made everyone uncomfortable. | 1.4718 | 0.04034 | 284 | 180 | 74 | 30 |
299 | I bet heaven gets cable. | 1.4718 | 0.04125 | 284 | 183 | 68 | 33 |
300 | He's worried about his carbon footprint | 1.4700 | 0.04284 | 283 | 188 | 57 | 38 |
301 | This is just the commercial. Fox News will be back in a minute. | 1.4700 | 0.04075 | 283 | 181 | 71 | 31 |
302 | If you think this fire safety video is out of date just wait until you see the sexual harassment orientation | 1.4700 | 0.03981 | 283 | 178 | 77 | 28 |
303 | If you wanted high def, you should have been a better person. | 1.4700 | 0.03918 | 283 | 176 | 81 | 26 |
304 | What kind of sin do you have to commit to get a real fire? | 1.4700 | 0.03981 | 283 | 178 | 77 | 28 |
305 | I’m amazed at the reception we get down here. | 1.4700 | 0.04044 | 283 | 180 | 73 | 30 |
306 | With so many lawyers here, HR insist on these health and safety videos. | 1.4698 | 0.04188 | 281 | 183 | 64 | 34 |
307 | You think this is hell? Wait until the pledge breaks every ten minutes. | 1.4698 | 0.04157 | 281 | 182 | 66 | 33 |
308 | Is it hot in here, or is it just you? | 1.4698 | 0.04157 | 281 | 182 | 66 | 33 |
309 | At least the Weather Channel is more accurate down here. | 1.4695 | 0.03990 | 279 | 175 | 77 | 27 |
310 | He's really been working on lowering his carbon footprint. | 1.4674 | 0.04044 | 261 | 162 | 76 | 23 |
311 | At least it's a break from Fox News. | 1.4674 | 0.04118 | 276 | 177 | 69 | 30 |
312 | The brochure promised it would be someplace really warm with clothing optional. | 1.4672 | 0.03941 | 274 | 170 | 80 | 24 |
313 | One channel and only a 27 inch screen? This is Hell! | 1.4672 | 0.04108 | 274 | 175 | 70 | 29 |
314 | It's a nice break from Fox News. | 1.4672 | 0.04451 | 274 | 186 | 48 | 40 |
315 | The only thing worse than Hell is watching re-runs of Hell. | 1.4672 | 0.04042 | 274 | 173 | 74 | 27 |
316 | You can ask, but I think this is the only channel they get. | 1.4669 | 0.04227 | 272 | 177 | 63 | 32 |
317 | Look on the bright side - at least its not the golf channel. | 1.4669 | 0.04227 | 272 | 177 | 63 | 32 |
318 | It’s an effort to reduce greenhouse gases... | 1.4661 | 0.06100 | 118 | 74 | 33 | 11 |
319 | Even Dante couldn't have imagined this circle of hell: no digital, no remote, and a single channel. | 1.4649 | 0.04040 | 271 | 171 | 74 | 26 |
320 | We're toast! | 1.4647 | 0.04196 | 269 | 174 | 65 | 30 |
321 | At Christmas, they put a yule log on. | 1.4647 | 0.04229 | 269 | 175 | 63 | 31 |
322 | I should have been suspicious when he promised I’d even get to spend eternity with an old flame. | 1.4647 | 0.04261 | 269 | 176 | 61 | 32 |
323 | So who is going to ask if we can change the channel? | 1.4644 | 0.04014 | 267 | 167 | 76 | 24 |
324 | This can't be Hell, there's no commercials. | 1.4644 | 0.03943 | 267 | 165 | 80 | 22 |
325 | This would be hell, but for the nudity. | 1.4627 | 0.04273 | 268 | 176 | 60 | 32 |
326 | Who the Hell's got the remote? | 1.4624 | 0.04128 | 266 | 170 | 69 | 27 |
327 | I agree, checking the weather before getting dressed makes sense. | 1.4624 | 0.03988 | 266 | 166 | 77 | 23 |
328 | I wish we could watch something besides the weather channel | 1.4624 | 0.04059 | 266 | 168 | 73 | 25 |
329 | The 'Shopping Network' comes on at 5. That's when the torture really begins. | 1.4621 | 0.04116 | 264 | 168 | 70 | 26 |
330 | Rumor has it the ninth circle is watching Trump on FOX twenty-four seven. | 1.4618 | 0.04345 | 262 | 173 | 57 | 32 |
331 | It froze over after the election. | 1.4618 | 0.04345 | 262 | 173 | 57 | 32 |
332 | It's just the opening graphics. Bill O'Reilly will be on in 60 seconds. | 1.4618 | 0.04312 | 262 | 172 | 59 | 31 |
333 | Welcome to the White House! | 1.4618 | 0.04345 | 262 | 173 | 57 | 32 |
334 | You're hot. | 1.4612 | 0.04345 | 245 | 158 | 61 | 26 |
335 | Wish they would hurry up with the orientation, I’m freezing out here. | 1.4609 | 0.04245 | 256 | 165 | 64 | 27 |
336 | I'm not sure this orientation video is necessary. | 1.4598 | 0.04289 | 261 | 171 | 60 | 30 |
337 | It's the same forecast everyday---hotter than hell. | 1.4595 | 0.04279 | 259 | 169 | 61 | 29 |
338 | It’s true, we only get FOX down here. | 1.4595 | 0.04416 | 259 | 173 | 53 | 33 |
339 | It's the Trump Channel, welcome to Hell. | 1.4595 | 0.04313 | 259 | 170 | 59 | 30 |
340 | The new fall line-up looks really hot. | 1.4595 | 0.03797 | 259 | 156 | 87 | 16 |
341 | I thought virtual hell was just an expression. | 1.4595 | 0.04136 | 259 | 165 | 69 | 25 |
342 | No cable, no flat screen ... this is hell. | 1.4595 | 0.04279 | 259 | 169 | 61 | 29 |
343 | The weather channel again? | 1.4595 | 0.04172 | 259 | 166 | 67 | 26 |
344 | I can't believe they're making us sit through previews for an eternity | 1.4595 | 0.04172 | 259 | 166 | 67 | 26 |
345 | It looks like freezing over is off the table. | 1.4595 | 0.04243 | 259 | 168 | 63 | 28 |
346 | How long have you been on the Republican campaign? | 1.4595 | 0.04243 | 259 | 168 | 63 | 28 |
347 | I told you Hell would be watching Fox all day. | 1.4591 | 0.04510 | 257 | 174 | 48 | 35 |
348 | Thank you for coming to hell. We hope you enjoy this informative preview of eternity. | 1.4591 | 0.04338 | 257 | 169 | 58 | 30 |
349 | I swear to God, if he shows us one more home movie— | 1.4591 | 0.04373 | 257 | 170 | 56 | 31 |
350 | I hear the next circle down watches "Hannity." | 1.4574 | 0.04462 | 258 | 174 | 50 | 34 |
351 | Personally, I'm in heaven right now. The reception here is way better than in my old apartment. | 1.4570 | 0.03905 | 256 | 157 | 81 | 18 |
352 | Of course there's only one channel--it's hell. | 1.4570 | 0.04279 | 256 | 167 | 61 | 28 |
353 | The brilliant part is that we each still get a cable bill. | 1.4570 | 0.04243 | 256 | 166 | 63 | 27 |
354 | He's in a good mood today. Usually, we have to watch C-SPAN. | 1.4570 | 0.04315 | 256 | 168 | 59 | 29 |
355 | The Democrats in the catacomb next door have to watch Fox News. | 1.4570 | 0.04350 | 256 | 169 | 57 | 30 |
356 | On Christmas we get to watch the yule log. | 1.4567 | 0.04340 | 254 | 167 | 58 | 29 |
357 | The repair guy gave us a window of noon to eternity. | 1.4563 | 0.04292 | 252 | 164 | 61 | 27 |
358 | The other channel runs political ads. | 1.4563 | 0.04437 | 252 | 168 | 53 | 31 |
359 | Art imitates afterlife. | 1.4563 | 0.04365 | 252 | 166 | 57 | 29 |
360 | When lunch break is over they turn it back to Fox News. | 1.4563 | 0.04543 | 252 | 171 | 47 | 34 |
361 | If we smack it on the side, do you think could get snow? | 1.4563 | 0.04255 | 252 | 163 | 63 | 26 |
362 | 666 channels, and still nothing good on. | 1.4563 | 0.04543 | 252 | 171 | 47 | 34 |
363 | For a guy, not having the remote is really the most painful part... | 1.4563 | 0.04255 | 252 | 163 | 63 | 26 |
364 | This is hell, there is no remote. | 1.4542 | 0.04229 | 251 | 162 | 64 | 25 |
365 | Thank god they changed the channel, I really needed a break from all the bad news. | 1.4542 | 0.04266 | 251 | 163 | 62 | 26 |
366 | Maybe if we all peed at once.., | 1.4542 | 0.04485 | 251 | 169 | 50 | 32 |
367 | Hell of a show. | 1.4542 | 0.04377 | 251 | 166 | 56 | 29 |
368 | After the on-boarding video, I hear it's a continuous loop of Sean Hannity. | 1.4538 | 0.04440 | 249 | 166 | 53 | 30 |
369 | You think this is bad. Wait 'til he switches to "Hannity." | 1.4538 | 0.04476 | 249 | 167 | 51 | 31 |
370 | Did you work for Comcast too? | 1.4538 | 0.04476 | 249 | 167 | 51 | 31 |
371 | This reminds me of your 50th birthday, most of your friends are here too. | 1.4534 | 0.04041 | 247 | 154 | 74 | 19 |
372 | Wanna cool off? I've got a picture of water back at my place. | 1.4534 | 0.04041 | 247 | 154 | 74 | 19 |
373 | Oh, I've seen this inferno thousands of times; it goes on and on for, like, ever. | 1.4534 | 0.04121 | 247 | 156 | 70 | 21 |
374 | They call it Hell-a-vision. | 1.4534 | 0.04392 | 247 | 163 | 56 | 28 |
375 | What in Hell are we watching? | 1.4534 | 0.04429 | 247 | 164 | 54 | 29 |
376 | Fox & Friends will return after a brief word from our sponsor. | 1.4534 | 0.04647 | 247 | 170 | 42 | 35 |
377 | Sure, it's hot. But it's a dry heat. | 1.4531 | 0.04342 | 245 | 160 | 59 | 26 |
378 | I always figured hell’s cable would be set to Fox News | 1.4531 | 0.04380 | 245 | 161 | 57 | 27 |
379 | It's black and white and only three channels. Channel 6 FIRE, 66 BRIMSTONE, 666 FOX NEWS | 1.4531 | 0.04640 | 245 | 168 | 43 | 34 |
380 | At least we don't have to watch Fox and Friends. | 1.4531 | 0.04419 | 245 | 162 | 55 | 28 |
381 | If you think this is painful, wait until you see the commercials. | 1.4508 | 0.04276 | 244 | 158 | 62 | 24 |
382 | So what brings you here? | 1.4508 | 0.04276 | 244 | 158 | 62 | 24 |
383 | They call it Fox & Friends. | 1.4508 | 0.04506 | 244 | 164 | 50 | 30 |
384 | Trust me, just keep pretending you are really hot. It beats the alternative. | 1.4505 | 0.06493 | 91 | 56 | 29 | 6 |
385 | Thank God I remembered my glasses. | 1.4504 | 0.04341 | 242 | 158 | 59 | 25 |
386 | It’s either this or FOX. | 1.4504 | 0.04496 | 242 | 162 | 51 | 29 |
387 | I feel naked without my iPhone. | 1.4504 | 0.04380 | 242 | 159 | 57 | 26 |
388 | Shhh... The President is about to welcome us to Trump University Post Graduate School. | 1.4504 | 0.04458 | 242 | 161 | 53 | 28 |
389 | I hear in Purgatory they get cable. | 1.4504 | 0.04221 | 242 | 155 | 65 | 22 |
390 | Sorry, this is the only place that would host the 2020 Republican Convention. | 1.4504 | 0.04609 | 242 | 165 | 45 | 32 |
391 | One TV, no cable - this really is hell | 1.4504 | 0.04180 | 242 | 154 | 67 | 21 |
392 | I knew it, 'hell' is watching reality TV. | 1.4504 | 0.04496 | 242 | 162 | 51 | 29 |
393 | I had a feeling watching Fox News would be mandatory here. | 1.4504 | 0.04646 | 242 | 166 | 43 | 33 |
394 | I don't get too close because the radiation from those old TV sets can kill you. | 1.4504 | 0.04341 | 242 | 158 | 59 | 25 |
395 | It could be worse; the next circle down is the all Kardashian channel | 1.4500 | 0.04446 | 240 | 159 | 54 | 27 |
396 | The lawyers in the next room say a real fire is too much liability. | 1.4500 | 0.04287 | 240 | 155 | 62 | 23 |
397 | It’s the Christmas music that really gets to me. | 1.4493 | 0.04592 | 227 | 151 | 50 | 26 |
398 | He says we'll get a flat screen when heaven freezes over. | 1.4481 | 0.04313 | 241 | 157 | 60 | 24 |
399 | It only gets two channels ... this and Fox News. | 1.4477 | 0.04459 | 239 | 159 | 53 | 27 |
400 | I so hate orientation videos. | 1.4477 | 0.04216 | 239 | 153 | 65 | 21 |
401 | I hear season 2 is even hotter | 1.4477 | 0.04498 | 239 | 160 | 51 | 28 |
402 | I hear that he's out of brimstone, too. | 1.4477 | 0.04298 | 239 | 155 | 61 | 23 |
403 | The worst part is we still have to pay for the bundled phone service. | 1.4477 | 0.04216 | 239 | 153 | 65 | 21 |
404 | I know you're all disappointed, but we're making the switch to a more sustainable method of eternal damnation. | 1.4477 | 0.04379 | 239 | 157 | 57 | 25 |
405 | He just hasn't been the same since hell froze over. | 1.4477 | 0.04379 | 239 | 157 | 57 | 25 |
406 | Quit complaining, at least its not Fox News | 1.4468 | 0.04555 | 235 | 158 | 49 | 28 |
407 | And now, back to 'The Apprentice' | 1.4468 | 0.04595 | 235 | 159 | 47 | 29 |
408 | This is the part where he says, “You’re fired” | 1.4468 | 0.04595 | 235 | 159 | 47 | 29 |
409 | Yeah, it's been like this since we ran out of fossil fuels for the brimstone. | 1.4468 | 0.04515 | 235 | 157 | 51 | 27 |
410 | Ironically, it's the Yule Log. | 1.4468 | 0.04474 | 235 | 156 | 53 | 26 |
411 | You think this is bad? This time last week I was at Mar-a-Lago. | 1.4464 | 0.04461 | 233 | 154 | 54 | 25 |
412 | So, this is Trump TV. | 1.4464 | 0.04584 | 233 | 157 | 48 | 28 |
413 | We got naked for this? | 1.4464 | 0.04419 | 233 | 153 | 56 | 24 |
414 | Do you have any plans after the show? | 1.4464 | 0.04461 | 233 | 154 | 54 | 25 |
415 | I always hate the coming attractions. | 1.4464 | 0.04335 | 233 | 151 | 60 | 22 |
416 | I thought it would be a little more hands on. | 1.4464 | 0.04205 | 233 | 148 | 66 | 19 |
417 | I voted for Jill Stein in Michigan. Why are you here? | 1.4440 | 0.04597 | 232 | 157 | 47 | 28 |
418 | Hell, I hate reality TV. | 1.4440 | 0.04474 | 232 | 154 | 53 | 25 |
419 | Welcome to the United States Immigration Process. | 1.4435 | 0.04460 | 230 | 152 | 54 | 24 |
420 | “Naked and Afraid” is quite popular here. | 1.4435 | 0.04330 | 230 | 149 | 60 | 21 |
421 | " Has to be better than a Sarah Huckleberry Sanders News / Press Conference". | 1.4435 | 0.04627 | 230 | 156 | 46 | 28 |
422 | Spoiler Alert: It doesn't get better. | 1.4435 | 0.04460 | 230 | 152 | 54 | 24 |
423 | So, probably no wifi either... | 1.4430 | 0.04313 | 228 | 147 | 61 | 20 |
424 | I would’ve been more diligent if I’d known eternity was without cable. | 1.4430 | 0.04313 | 228 | 147 | 61 | 20 |
425 | We’ll have a real one when Trump gets here. | 1.4430 | 0.04820 | 228 | 159 | 37 | 32 |
426 | It's not the worst timeshare presentation I've been to. | 1.4430 | 0.04445 | 228 | 150 | 55 | 23 |
427 | Are all the TVs tuned to Fox? | 1.4409 | 0.04826 | 220 | 152 | 39 | 29 |
428 | I'm going to get some popcorn and forbidden fruit juice, you want anything? | 1.4405 | 0.04279 | 227 | 146 | 62 | 19 |
429 | He's had to give up using fossil fuels. | 1.4405 | 0.04544 | 227 | 152 | 50 | 25 |
430 | The only channel we can get is Fox. | 1.4405 | 0.04754 | 227 | 157 | 40 | 30 |
431 | This is just the warm up. | 1.4405 | 0.04369 | 227 | 148 | 58 | 21 |
432 | I'm just relieved that it's not Fox News | 1.4405 | 0.04458 | 227 | 150 | 54 | 23 |
433 | Great. We finally get a TV down here and he leaves it set on the Yule log channel. | 1.4405 | 0.04629 | 227 | 154 | 46 | 27 |
434 | C'mon, rabbit ears? I really am in Hell. | 1.4405 | 0.04501 | 227 | 151 | 52 | 24 |
435 | Oh, Hell. Eternal reruns. | 1.4405 | 0.04671 | 227 | 155 | 44 | 28 |
436 | a nice fire, enjoying it in the nude----this must be heaven. | 1.4405 | 0.04458 | 227 | 150 | 54 | 23 |
437 | I hate when the previews give everything away. | 1.4405 | 0.04234 | 227 | 145 | 64 | 18 |
438 | At least it's not a White House press briefing. | 1.4405 | 0.04544 | 227 | 152 | 50 | 25 |
439 | When we get to the next layer, they read us his tweets. | 1.4405 | 0.04587 | 227 | 153 | 48 | 26 |
440 | What! No cable! Oh hell! | 1.4405 | 0.04458 | 227 | 150 | 54 | 23 |
441 | Wait til the millennials get here and don't know what horizontal hold is. | 1.4400 | 0.04530 | 225 | 150 | 51 | 24 |
442 | Heeeyyy ... the women have breasts but none of the men have penises! This MUST be Hell! | 1.4400 | 0.04530 | 225 | 150 | 51 | 24 |
443 | Well, at least it's not "Roseanne". | 1.4395 | 0.04734 | 223 | 153 | 42 | 28 |
444 | "I'm going to Korea" he said. "What could go wrong" he said... | 1.4395 | 0.04560 | 223 | 149 | 50 | 24 |
445 | This does seem pretty severe for using my neighbors Netflix account. | 1.4395 | 0.04470 | 223 | 147 | 54 | 22 |
446 | Why do we even bother watching the weather channel? | 1.4395 | 0.04515 | 223 | 148 | 52 | 23 |
447 | This orientation video is so boring. I wish they'd just let us in. | 1.4389 | 0.04590 | 221 | 148 | 49 | 24 |
448 | He calls it reality TV. | 1.4389 | 0.04590 | 221 | 148 | 49 | 24 |
449 | Considering where we are, I would have expected Fox and Friends. | 1.4389 | 0.04766 | 221 | 152 | 41 | 28 |
450 | 666 channels and nothin' on. | 1.4389 | 0.04407 | 221 | 144 | 57 | 20 |
451 | What’d I miss. | 1.4389 | 0.04499 | 221 | 146 | 53 | 22 |
452 | Coming attractions. | 1.4364 | 0.04420 | 220 | 144 | 56 | 20 |
453 | If I had known there was no cable, I would have been a better person. | 1.4364 | 0.04558 | 220 | 147 | 50 | 23 |
454 | And we still have to pay $149 a month for it. | 1.4364 | 0.04420 | 220 | 144 | 56 | 20 |
455 | What are you doing after orientation? | 1.4358 | 0.04400 | 218 | 142 | 57 | 19 |
456 | Hannity's up next! | 1.4358 | 0.04680 | 218 | 148 | 45 | 25 |
457 | Six hundred and sixty-six channels and nothing on | 1.4358 | 0.04769 | 218 | 150 | 41 | 27 |
458 | If I knew this was it, I would have cheated on my wife and my taxes. | 1.4358 | 0.04589 | 218 | 146 | 49 | 23 |
459 | The damned today are so detached from perdition. Back in the day, we had to stand IN the flames. | 1.4358 | 0.04634 | 218 | 147 | 47 | 24 |
460 | Apparently new regulations force them to show us this instructional video before they get to the actual burning. | 1.4358 | 0.04448 | 218 | 143 | 55 | 20 |
461 | I hear the Fifth Circle has a flat screen. | 1.4352 | 0.04666 | 216 | 146 | 46 | 24 |
462 | Has anyone tried changing the channel? | 1.4352 | 0.04380 | 216 | 140 | 58 | 18 |
463 | Wow. Looks like we left Earth just in time. | 1.4352 | 0.04619 | 216 | 145 | 48 | 23 |
464 | We're in hell's the remote? | 1.4352 | 0.04666 | 216 | 146 | 46 | 24 |
465 | I heard that in the seventh circle, they have it tuned to Fox News. | 1.4352 | 0.04757 | 216 | 148 | 42 | 26 |
466 | No cable and it’s black and white. This place is worse than I thought. | 1.4352 | 0.04477 | 216 | 142 | 54 | 20 |
467 | I heard the people upstairs have Netflix. | 1.4352 | 0.04572 | 216 | 144 | 50 | 22 |
468 | I honestly thought it would be warmer. | 1.4352 | 0.04525 | 216 | 143 | 52 | 21 |
469 | And you said there was no way in hell anybody could cancel Comcast. | 1.4352 | 0.04666 | 216 | 146 | 46 | 24 |
470 | I hate reality shows. | 1.4352 | 0.04525 | 216 | 143 | 52 | 21 |
471 | You think this is torture? It's just the screensaver before Fox News comes on. | 1.4352 | 0.04666 | 216 | 146 | 46 | 24 |
472 | You'd think the the first circle would have better reception. | 1.4352 | 0.04331 | 216 | 139 | 60 | 17 |
473 | I expected no hope, not no cable. | 1.4346 | 0.04836 | 214 | 148 | 39 | 27 |
474 | Whoa! I didn't know The New Yorker could show boobs. | 1.4346 | 0.04790 | 214 | 147 | 41 | 26 |
475 | Hot and naked? I think I've died and gone to heaven. | 1.4346 | 0.04507 | 214 | 141 | 53 | 20 |
476 | Since they outsourced hell, the punishment hasn't been the same. | 1.4346 | 0.04603 | 214 | 143 | 49 | 22 |
477 | At least it's a dry heat. | 1.4346 | 0.04507 | 214 | 141 | 53 | 20 |
478 | Safety video. Oh he's good. | 1.4346 | 0.04555 | 214 | 142 | 51 | 21 |
479 | I was worried it would be tuned to Fox News. | 1.4346 | 0.04790 | 214 | 147 | 41 | 26 |
480 | This is it? No clothes. No cable. | 1.4346 | 0.04507 | 214 | 141 | 53 | 20 |
481 | You would think the Prince of Darkness could afford a flat screen. | 1.4338 | 0.04617 | 219 | 148 | 47 | 24 |
482 | It's a prequel to Dante. | 1.4319 | 0.04520 | 213 | 141 | 52 | 20 |
483 | I would have lived a better life if I knew there was no cable | 1.4319 | 0.04759 | 213 | 146 | 42 | 25 |
484 | I guess in this case ending up in the overflow room isn't so bad. | 1.4319 | 0.04421 | 213 | 139 | 56 | 18 |
485 | Is it just me, or does it seem like this show lasts for an eternity? | 1.4319 | 0.04520 | 213 | 141 | 52 | 20 |
486 | He won't get cable—something about Comcast being too evil. | 1.4319 | 0.04805 | 213 | 147 | 40 | 26 |
487 | 'No cable? Yes, we are in hell' | 1.4319 | 0.04520 | 213 | 141 | 52 | 20 |
488 | I should have guessed the first abomination of hell would be an orientation video. | 1.4319 | 0.04805 | 213 | 147 | 40 | 26 |
489 | I was dying to see this show. Now I’m not so sure. | 1.4319 | 0.04520 | 213 | 141 | 52 | 20 |
490 | I like it better on screen than in person... | 1.4319 | 0.04569 | 213 | 142 | 50 | 21 |
491 | I'm just thankful this is my last orientation meeting ever. | 1.4313 | 0.04600 | 211 | 141 | 49 | 21 |
492 | The rules for these White House press briefings have become humiliating. | 1.4313 | 0.05022 | 211 | 150 | 31 | 30 |
493 | Yes, we’ve been waiting forever for the cable guy to get here. | 1.4313 | 0.04885 | 211 | 147 | 37 | 27 |
494 | I knew I’d run into some old flames down here but this is ridiculous. | 1.4313 | 0.04450 | 211 | 138 | 55 | 18 |
495 | I hear heaven has HD and flat screens. | 1.4313 | 0.04600 | 211 | 141 | 49 | 21 |
496 | He says this is the largest audience, period. | 1.4313 | 0.04551 | 211 | 140 | 51 | 20 |
497 | Welcome to Heck. | 1.4313 | 0.04649 | 211 | 142 | 47 | 22 |
498 | ...and every day from 6 to 9 he makes us stand here and watch Fox News. | 1.4313 | 0.04600 | 211 | 141 | 49 | 21 |
499 | Forecast calls for flame. | 1.4313 | 0.04450 | 211 | 138 | 55 | 18 |
500 | I didn’t see seasons one through six-thousand, but it’s surprisingly easy to follow. | 1.4313 | 0.04697 | 211 | 143 | 45 | 23 |
501 | We're reducing our carbon footprint. | 1.4306 | 0.04581 | 209 | 139 | 50 | 20 |
502 | It froze over. | 1.4306 | 0.04826 | 209 | 144 | 40 | 25 |
503 | A black and white portable with rabbit ears! Welcome to hell. | 1.4306 | 0.04826 | 209 | 144 | 40 | 25 |
504 | It's a closed circuit feed. The main room is full. Not that I'm complaining. | 1.4306 | 0.04581 | 209 | 139 | 50 | 20 |
505 | For real? The Weather Channel. | 1.4306 | 0.04480 | 209 | 137 | 54 | 18 |
506 | Breaking News: Global warming is not fake news. | 1.4306 | 0.04873 | 209 | 145 | 38 | 26 |
507 | Coincidentally, I think I'm here because of a night a lot like this one. | 1.4300 | 0.04812 | 207 | 142 | 41 | 24 |
508 | The book's better. | 1.4300 | 0.04562 | 207 | 137 | 51 | 19 |
509 | All they play down here is election coverage. | 1.4300 | 0.04458 | 207 | 135 | 55 | 17 |
510 | Whatever you do, don't fart. | 1.4300 | 0.04613 | 207 | 138 | 49 | 20 |
511 | It was this or The 700 Club. | 1.4286 | 0.04947 | 210 | 148 | 34 | 28 |
512 | Welcome to orientation. | 1.4286 | 0.04712 | 210 | 143 | 44 | 23 |
513 | I hear in the 7th circle of hell they put the flames to accordion music. | 1.4272 | 0.04827 | 206 | 142 | 40 | 24 |
514 | I thought there'd be more gays. | 1.4272 | 0.04575 | 206 | 137 | 50 | 19 |
515 | I dare you to change it to the Snow Channel | 1.4272 | 0.04728 | 206 | 140 | 44 | 22 |
516 | Casual Fryday. | 1.4270 | 0.04764 | 185 | 122 | 47 | 16 |
517 | It really doesn't compare to experiencing it live. | 1.4265 | 0.04762 | 204 | 139 | 43 | 22 |
518 | It feels like we’ve had to watch this for an eternity. | 1.4265 | 0.04659 | 204 | 137 | 47 | 20 |
519 | I’ve heard the 2nd season sucks. | 1.4265 | 0.04812 | 204 | 140 | 41 | 23 |
520 | Rabbit ears, really?!?! You'd think there'd be at least one cable installer down here. | 1.4265 | 0.04711 | 204 | 138 | 45 | 21 |
521 | In Life, I had 100s of channels to watch and no friends. Now, I have one and I'm surrounded by naked people. Despite eternal damnation, I consider this a win." | 1.4265 | 0.04762 | 204 | 139 | 43 | 22 |
522 | The real punishment is that there's no remote. | 1.4265 | 0.04812 | 204 | 140 | 41 | 23 |
523 | What did I miss? | 1.4265 | 0.04607 | 204 | 136 | 49 | 19 |
524 | The reception down here is surprisingly good. | 1.4265 | 0.04607 | 204 | 136 | 49 | 19 |
525 | He said it might not be the hell we want but it's the hell we all deserve | 1.4257 | 0.04586 | 202 | 134 | 50 | 18 |
526 | Too bad we can't clear this place out by yelling 'fire'. | 1.4257 | 0.04477 | 202 | 132 | 54 | 16 |
527 | I should have had WAY more fun up there. | 1.4257 | 0.04796 | 202 | 138 | 42 | 22 |
528 | Maybe Hell is not being able to change the channel. | 1.4257 | 0.04639 | 202 | 135 | 48 | 19 |
529 | I asked him to change the channel but all he said was “Hell, no!” | 1.4250 | 0.04672 | 200 | 134 | 47 | 19 |
530 | Oh no, he's making us watch another one of his crappy home videos. | 1.4250 | 0.04508 | 200 | 131 | 53 | 16 |
531 | Wow, I wish I'd known we were only in for virtual hell. | 1.4250 | 0.04452 | 200 | 130 | 55 | 15 |
532 | It only picks up local programming. | 1.4249 | 0.04850 | 193 | 131 | 42 | 20 |
533 | Who knew that the cable companies were owned and operated by Satan. | 1.4221 | 0.04632 | 199 | 133 | 48 | 18 |
534 | Rabbit ears! The Time Warner merger must have gone through. | 1.4221 | 0.04521 | 199 | 131 | 52 | 16 |
535 | You want HDTV? Where the Hell do yo think you are? | 1.4221 | 0.04687 | 199 | 134 | 46 | 19 |
536 | Is this supposed to be actual or virtual Hell? | 1.4221 | 0.04740 | 199 | 135 | 44 | 20 |
537 | For how much longer do you think Satan is going to make us watch this Trump press conference? | 1.4221 | 0.04846 | 199 | 137 | 40 | 22 |
538 | Oh I’ve seen it before, it’s the re-run from Hell. | 1.4221 | 0.04687 | 199 | 134 | 46 | 19 |
539 | Why did we have to get naked for this? | 1.4221 | 0.04577 | 199 | 132 | 50 | 17 |
540 | It's a decent adaptation but I thought the book was better. | 1.4221 | 0.04465 | 199 | 130 | 54 | 15 |
541 | It's just the coming attractions. | 1.4221 | 0.04521 | 199 | 131 | 52 | 16 |
542 | They're trying to lower their carbon footprint. | 1.4221 | 0.04794 | 199 | 136 | 42 | 21 |
543 | This is the waiting room. He thinks it's funny. | 1.4221 | 0.04577 | 199 | 132 | 50 | 17 |
544 | I hate this episode. | 1.4221 | 0.04794 | 199 | 136 | 42 | 21 |
545 | Trust me, it's better than live. | 1.4213 | 0.04775 | 197 | 134 | 43 | 20 |
546 | The Fox and Friends Marathon is next! | 1.4213 | 0.05191 | 197 | 142 | 27 | 28 |
547 | We used to wanna watch Fox News. Now we have to. | 1.4213 | 0.05039 | 197 | 139 | 33 | 25 |
548 | It will really be hell if they start showing Roseanne re-runs. | 1.4213 | 0.05039 | 197 | 139 | 33 | 25 |
549 | Orientation video | 1.4213 | 0.04720 | 197 | 133 | 45 | 19 |
550 | Hell Inc. has been ordered to reduce it's carbon footprint. | 1.4213 | 0.04553 | 197 | 130 | 51 | 16 |
551 | I heard this is just the warm-up--we watch Fox News for the rest of eternity. | 1.4213 | 0.05090 | 197 | 140 | 31 | 26 |
552 | We get to watch this whenever this place ‘freezes over. | 1.4213 | 0.04665 | 197 | 132 | 47 | 18 |
553 | My favorite flame is coming up next! It has a little tinge of green to it. | 1.4213 | 0.04495 | 197 | 129 | 53 | 15 |
554 | That's just the coming attraction. | 1.4213 | 0.04553 | 197 | 130 | 51 | 16 |
555 | There are a lot more white people here than I was expecting. | 1.4205 | 0.04972 | 195 | 136 | 36 | 23 |
556 | If I had known how backwards the TV programming and technology are down here, I would have thought twice about coveting you. | 1.4205 | 0.04348 | 195 | 125 | 58 | 12 |
557 | Do we have to stand through the entire orientation? | 1.4205 | 0.04810 | 195 | 133 | 42 | 20 |
558 | And, he's got the remote for eternity! | 1.4205 | 0.04865 | 176 | 117 | 44 | 15 |
559 | No, it's too late to say you believe in global warming now. | 1.4200 | 0.04559 | 200 | 133 | 50 | 17 |
560 | At first, Fox News was on, but then the Devil thought it was too much for him. | 1.4197 | 0.04956 | 193 | 134 | 37 | 22 |
561 | Honestly? Not the worst house warming party I’ve been to... | 1.4197 | 0.04439 | 193 | 125 | 55 | 13 |
562 | I thought I was safe. I voted for Hilary. | 1.4197 | 0.04790 | 193 | 131 | 43 | 19 |
563 | It'll be a cold day in hell before we get cable. | 1.4197 | 0.04901 | 193 | 133 | 39 | 21 |
564 | There's a special place in Hell for hogging the remote. | 1.4192 | 0.04701 | 198 | 134 | 45 | 19 |
565 | It's nice to have a break from the brimstone channel. | 1.4192 | 0.04591 | 198 | 132 | 49 | 17 |
566 | Zenith. How ironic. | 1.4167 | 0.04748 | 192 | 130 | 44 | 18 |
567 | Don't tell me how it ends. | 1.4167 | 0.04632 | 192 | 128 | 48 | 16 |
568 | It was either this or reruns of The Apprentice. | 1.4167 | 0.04805 | 192 | 131 | 42 | 19 |
569 | I knew it! All RERUNS! | 1.4167 | 0.04861 | 192 | 132 | 40 | 20 |
570 | So listen up! All that "fire and brimstone" stuff -- fake news. | 1.4167 | 0.04972 | 192 | 134 | 36 | 22 |
571 | Because real flames are a fire hazard. | 1.4167 | 0.04690 | 192 | 129 | 46 | 17 |
572 | The word is we're getting cable when hell freezes over. | 1.4167 | 0.04632 | 192 | 128 | 48 | 16 |
573 | Remember when you said......"it would be a cold day in hell. | 1.4167 | 0.04632 | 192 | 128 | 48 | 16 |
574 | Next time let ME pick the resort. | 1.4161 | 0.05311 | 149 | 100 | 36 | 13 |
575 | The other channel is brimstone. | 1.4158 | 0.04955 | 190 | 132 | 37 | 21 |
576 | I hear that in the Ninth Circle it's Fox and Friends 24-7 | 1.4158 | 0.05228 | 190 | 137 | 27 | 26 |
577 | I brought the marshmallows. Just need to borrow his fork. | 1.4158 | 0.04841 | 190 | 130 | 41 | 19 |
578 | Hell froze over a while back and the reception has been terrible ever since. | 1.4158 | 0.04841 | 190 | 130 | 41 | 19 |
579 | Brimstone comes on next. | 1.4149 | 0.04638 | 188 | 125 | 48 | 15 |
580 | It gets worse. This is just orientation. | 1.4149 | 0.04577 | 188 | 124 | 50 | 14 |
581 | I didn't expect an orientation video. | 1.4149 | 0.04819 | 188 | 128 | 42 | 18 |
582 | I heard the price of real fire and brimstone has gone through the roof. | 1.4149 | 0.04759 | 188 | 127 | 44 | 17 |
583 | Well, at least Hannity's not on. | 1.4149 | 0.04759 | 188 | 127 | 44 | 17 |
584 | It's only heaven if you were Norwegian. | 1.4140 | 0.04915 | 186 | 128 | 39 | 19 |
585 | At least it's not Fox & Friends. | 1.4140 | 0.04734 | 186 | 125 | 45 | 16 |
586 | These orientation videos are always so predictable. | 1.4140 | 0.04417 | 186 | 120 | 55 | 11 |
587 | Where's Donald? | 1.4140 | 0.05032 | 186 | 130 | 35 | 21 |
588 | Trump decided all the TVs have to play Fox News. | 1.4140 | 0.04974 | 186 | 129 | 37 | 20 |
589 | At Christmastime there's a log on the fire. | 1.4140 | 0.04610 | 186 | 123 | 49 | 14 |
590 | I know it's just an orientation video, but I pictured things being much more hellish. | 1.4140 | 0.04734 | 186 | 125 | 45 | 16 |
591 | In heaven, they have flat screen tvs and cable. | 1.4140 | 0.04855 | 186 | 127 | 41 | 18 |
592 | Do you think God knows that Satan is using His Netflix account? | 1.4122 | 0.05585 | 148 | 103 | 29 | 16 |
593 | At least they let me keep my Glasses... | 1.4118 | 0.04689 | 170 | 111 | 48 | 11 |
594 | Isn't this Scandinavian heaven? | 1.4109 | 0.05887 | 129 | 89 | 27 | 13 |
595 | Whaddya say we skip the orientation and just go straight in? | 1.4108 | 0.04687 | 185 | 124 | 46 | 15 |
596 | Should I ask him to change the damned channel? | 1.4108 | 0.04624 | 185 | 123 | 48 | 14 |
597 | We got naked to watch this? | 1.4108 | 0.04991 | 185 | 129 | 36 | 20 |
598 | Don’t forget the camera adds 400 degrees. | 1.4108 | 0.04811 | 185 | 126 | 42 | 17 |
599 | I'm so glad that we can get Fox News down here. | 1.4108 | 0.05049 | 185 | 130 | 34 | 21 |
600 | I liked the book better. | 1.4108 | 0.04871 | 185 | 127 | 40 | 18 |
601 | Isn't that our old Zenith? | 1.4108 | 0.04811 | 185 | 126 | 42 | 17 |
602 | Don’t worry, these orientation videos always make things out to be way worse than they really are. | 1.4108 | 0.04560 | 185 | 122 | 50 | 13 |
603 | You come here often? | 1.4108 | 0.04495 | 185 | 121 | 52 | 12 |
604 | Even in Hell you can't escape the news from the White House. | 1.4108 | 0.04991 | 185 | 129 | 36 | 20 |
605 | The cable repair window is between 8 am and eternity. | 1.4108 | 0.04811 | 185 | 126 | 42 | 17 |
606 | Wait until you see the Brimstone channel! | 1.4108 | 0.04931 | 185 | 128 | 38 | 19 |
607 | Is it hot down here, or is it you? | 1.4104 | 0.05115 | 173 | 120 | 35 | 18 |
608 | Really? Virtual Hell? | 1.4098 | 0.04847 | 183 | 125 | 41 | 17 |
609 | It's Fox News 24-7. | 1.4098 | 0.05320 | 183 | 133 | 25 | 25 |
610 | Everybody naked and watching tv instead of an orgy? What kind of hell is this? | 1.4098 | 0.04847 | 183 | 125 | 41 | 17 |
611 | Seriously ? A review of fire safety regs for new arrivals ! | 1.4098 | 0.04722 | 183 | 123 | 45 | 15 |
612 | Oh, really? I worked for Fox News too! | 1.4098 | 0.04722 | 183 | 123 | 45 | 15 |
613 | The cable guy is scheduled to arrive between 9 a.m. and eternity. Until then, we only get public access channels. | 1.4098 | 0.05030 | 183 | 128 | 35 | 20 |
614 | Wait...you worked at Fox too? | 1.4098 | 0.04909 | 183 | 126 | 39 | 18 |
615 | Only one channel, this really is hell. | 1.4098 | 0.04847 | 183 | 125 | 41 | 17 |
616 | How can the heat wave be 'breaking news' every day? | 1.4098 | 0.04722 | 183 | 123 | 45 | 15 |
617 | Things sure have changed since Roger Ailes arrived. | 1.4098 | 0.04460 | 183 | 119 | 53 | 11 |
618 | Just our luck, a hemorrhoid commercial on a loop for all eternity. | 1.4098 | 0.04722 | 183 | 123 | 45 | 15 |
619 | I hate these mandatory HR trainings. | 1.4098 | 0.04722 | 183 | 123 | 45 | 15 |
620 | Welcome to the "Hell For Dummies" workshop. | 1.4098 | 0.04785 | 183 | 124 | 43 | 16 |
621 | I heard it's been renewed for another ten million seasons. | 1.4098 | 0.04722 | 183 | 123 | 45 | 15 |
622 | It could be worse.... in the 3rd Circle, they make them watch Fox News 24/7! | 1.4098 | 0.04970 | 183 | 127 | 37 | 19 |
623 | No! I did NOT touch your ass! | 1.4088 | 0.04947 | 181 | 125 | 38 | 18 |
624 | And then the Brimstones are on at 8. | 1.4088 | 0.04885 | 181 | 124 | 40 | 17 |
625 | He said reruns of "The Apprentice" start in half an hour. | 1.4088 | 0.04947 | 181 | 125 | 38 | 18 |
626 | It's a sting. The invitation said "swingers" weekend. | 1.4088 | 0.05070 | 181 | 127 | 34 | 20 |
627 | I dare you to change the channel | 1.4088 | 0.04758 | 181 | 122 | 44 | 15 |
628 | It's really hell when you don't have cable. | 1.4088 | 0.04693 | 181 | 121 | 46 | 14 |
629 | Heaven has cable. | 1.4088 | 0.04947 | 181 | 125 | 38 | 18 |
630 | I'll be damned, I always thought this is where Fox News was born. | 1.4088 | 0.04885 | 181 | 124 | 40 | 17 |
631 | I can't believe it's only Monday--feels like an eternity. | 1.4088 | 0.04822 | 181 | 123 | 42 | 16 |
632 | Be grateful; I hear in the ninth circle they make them watch THE NEWS. | 1.4088 | 0.05009 | 181 | 126 | 36 | 19 |
633 | Damned right this is hell. That's a Sony Trinitron from 1996. | 1.4088 | 0.04758 | 181 | 122 | 44 | 15 |
634 | Including my last marriage, this is my second virtual hell. | 1.4088 | 0.04693 | 181 | 121 | 46 | 14 |
635 | Hey, we're lucky. It's usually Fox & Friends. | 1.4088 | 0.04885 | 181 | 124 | 40 | 17 |
636 | I really like his devil-may-care attitude. | 1.4088 | 0.04822 | 181 | 123 | 42 | 16 |
637 | Analogue?! Now I know it’s hell. | 1.4080 | 0.05091 | 174 | 121 | 35 | 18 |
638 | He calls it singe-watching. | 1.4078 | 0.04859 | 179 | 122 | 41 | 16 |
639 | Analog TV and no remote? I guess you're right, we are in hell. | 1.4078 | 0.04987 | 179 | 124 | 37 | 18 |
640 | Reality TV...? This really is hell. | 1.4078 | 0.04923 | 179 | 123 | 39 | 17 |
641 | It wouldn't be hell without reruns. | 1.4078 | 0.05049 | 179 | 125 | 35 | 19 |
642 | I hear they have premium cable in Heaven. | 1.4078 | 0.04923 | 179 | 123 | 39 | 17 |
643 | My definition of hell has always been losing the remote | 1.4078 | 0.04987 | 179 | 124 | 37 | 18 |
644 | Welcome to Phoenix. Where are you from? | 1.4078 | 0.05232 | 179 | 128 | 29 | 22 |
645 | After orientation, do you want to get a drink? | 1.4078 | 0.05172 | 179 | 127 | 31 | 21 |
646 | 'Serves us right for answering that "free vacation" robo call.' | 1.4078 | 0.04661 | 179 | 119 | 47 | 13 |
647 | This must be hell, I've seen this episode like a hundred times. | 1.4068 | 0.04764 | 177 | 119 | 44 | 14 |
648 | There's nothing but reality TV down here. | 1.4068 | 0.04696 | 177 | 118 | 46 | 13 |
649 | Orientation is always so awkward | 1.4068 | 0.04558 | 177 | 116 | 50 | 11 |
650 | ...and, thanks to relaxed EPA regulations, BRIMSTONE IS BACK! | 1.4068 | 0.05027 | 177 | 123 | 36 | 18 |
651 | Somehow I thought watching TV with our clothes off would be more fun. | 1.4068 | 0.04962 | 177 | 122 | 38 | 17 |
652 | Im hoping its fake news | 1.4068 | 0.05027 | 177 | 123 | 36 | 18 |
653 | Well, I always did think that whole "flames of hell" thing was allegorical. | 1.4068 | 0.04897 | 177 | 121 | 40 | 16 |
654 | I TOLD you not to vote for him! Welcome to hell! | 1.4068 | 0.05027 | 177 | 123 | 36 | 18 |
655 | You expected more than one channel? | 1.4068 | 0.04831 | 177 | 120 | 42 | 15 |
656 | Last week they made us watch the news. | 1.4068 | 0.04696 | 177 | 118 | 46 | 13 |
657 | No high-def? What the hell? | 1.4068 | 0.04897 | 177 | 121 | 40 | 16 |
658 | He has the remote, but God has the batteries. | 1.4068 | 0.05027 | 177 | 123 | 36 | 18 |
659 | Who knew they'd make you watch a video tutorial on how to suffer eternal damnation? | 1.4068 | 0.04831 | 177 | 120 | 42 | 15 |
660 | So, you're into fashion and high-definition cable TV. Welcome to hell. | 1.4034 | 0.04779 | 176 | 119 | 43 | 14 |
661 | Tomorrow's weather forecast. | 1.4034 | 0.04642 | 176 | 117 | 47 | 12 |
662 | Black and white. No remote. No cable. This is going to be hell. | 1.4034 | 0.04847 | 176 | 120 | 41 | 15 |
663 | Thank Heavens we still get the Weather Channel down here. | 1.4034 | 0.04779 | 176 | 119 | 43 | 14 |
664 | Welcome to a kindler, gentler Hell. | 1.4034 | 0.04571 | 176 | 116 | 49 | 11 |
665 | Well, we know where the remote ISN'T… | 1.4034 | 0.04779 | 176 | 119 | 43 | 14 |
666 | Amazing how far Trump's budget cuts are reaching. | 1.4034 | 0.05108 | 176 | 124 | 33 | 19 |
667 | I always thought the flames of Hell would be painful, but painfully boring might be worse. | 1.4034 | 0.04642 | 176 | 117 | 47 | 12 |
668 | He's getting soft ... it is usually Fox News. | 1.4034 | 0.04847 | 176 | 120 | 41 | 15 |
669 | It's not working. I still feel cold. | 1.4034 | 0.04500 | 176 | 115 | 51 | 10 |
670 | At least we don't have to watch slides from his vacation. | 1.4034 | 0.04642 | 176 | 117 | 47 | 12 |
671 | After seeing the Sistine chapel, this is not at all what I was expecting. | 1.4034 | 0.04979 | 176 | 122 | 37 | 17 |
672 | Hopefully this video will answer all your burning questions. | 1.4034 | 0.05233 | 176 | 126 | 29 | 21 |
673 | But in high def, you think you can feel the heat. | 1.4034 | 0.04711 | 176 | 118 | 45 | 13 |
674 | I feel like we’ve been watching the same show for an eternity. | 1.4034 | 0.05044 | 176 | 123 | 35 | 18 |
675 | The only other channel they get down here is Fox News. | 1.4034 | 0.05171 | 176 | 125 | 31 | 20 |
676 | Come here often ? | 1.4034 | 0.04779 | 176 | 119 | 43 | 14 |
677 | You're right. It is worse in Washington. | 1.4034 | 0.04979 | 176 | 122 | 37 | 17 |
678 | Remember how we used to see snow when the signal was bad... | 1.4034 | 0.04278 | 176 | 112 | 57 | 7 |
679 | I've seen this show before, believe me it doesn't end well. | 1.4034 | 0.04847 | 176 | 120 | 41 | 15 |
680 | Sean Hannity must be on vacation. | 1.4034 | 0.05171 | 176 | 125 | 31 | 20 |
681 | It's his new show 'As the World Burns'. It's the hottest thing on Hellavision. | 1.4023 | 0.04817 | 174 | 118 | 42 | 14 |
682 | Do you think this was shot on location? | 1.4023 | 0.04885 | 174 | 119 | 40 | 15 |
683 | These old TVs, they only get local stations. | 1.4023 | 0.04953 | 174 | 120 | 38 | 16 |
684 | At least we don’t have to hear about Trump’s tweets anymore | 1.4023 | 0.05085 | 174 | 122 | 34 | 18 |
685 | It's a repeat. | 1.4023 | 0.05019 | 174 | 121 | 36 | 17 |
686 | Ugh, another time share presentation. | 1.4023 | 0.04953 | 174 | 120 | 38 | 16 |
687 | I hope the torture isn’t as medieval as the technology. | 1.4015 | 0.05623 | 137 | 95 | 29 | 13 |
688 | At least it’s not Hannity. | 1.4012 | 0.05127 | 172 | 121 | 33 | 18 |
689 | Christmas he changes it to the Yule Log Show. | 1.4012 | 0.04855 | 172 | 117 | 41 | 14 |
690 | A black and white Zenith with rabbit ears and no remote! What more hell can we endure? | 1.4012 | 0.05060 | 172 | 120 | 35 | 17 |
691 | The Devil does not wear Prada - welcome to reality TV | 1.4012 | 0.04993 | 172 | 119 | 37 | 16 |
692 | I hear the coffee's still room temperature | 1.4012 | 0.04491 | 172 | 112 | 51 | 9 |
693 | Spoiler alert: it gets worse | 1.4012 | 0.04855 | 172 | 117 | 41 | 14 |
694 | This show seems like an eternity. | 1.4012 | 0.04784 | 172 | 116 | 43 | 13 |
695 | Don't worry. It is fake news! | 1.4012 | 0.04924 | 172 | 118 | 39 | 15 |
696 | Have you seen the remote? | 1.4012 | 0.04993 | 172 | 119 | 37 | 16 |
697 | You would think he could afford cable. | 1.4012 | 0.04640 | 172 | 114 | 47 | 11 |
698 | The first class assholes get rooms with real fire. | 1.4012 | 0.04993 | 172 | 119 | 37 | 16 |
699 | This isn't so bad. I'm actually kind of glad I killed my mother-in-law now. | 1.4012 | 0.05060 | 172 | 120 | 35 | 17 |
700 | TV is fine, but it doesn't really capture the live experience, does it? | 1.4012 | 0.04784 | 172 | 116 | 43 | 13 |
701 | Rabbit ears. We really are damned. | 1.4012 | 0.05193 | 172 | 122 | 31 | 19 |
702 | It's not eternal... it's just a loop. | 1.4012 | 0.04491 | 172 | 112 | 51 | 9 |
703 | And he lets us stay up as late as we want. | 1.4000 | 0.04675 | 170 | 113 | 46 | 11 |
704 | Eh, the book was better | 1.4000 | 0.04675 | 170 | 113 | 46 | 11 |
705 | Glad we made it out of the US... | 1.4000 | 0.05102 | 170 | 119 | 34 | 17 |
706 | It doesn't have quite the same effect, but I hear he's saving a fortune on gas. | 1.4000 | 0.04749 | 170 | 114 | 44 | 12 |
707 | I love this scene. | 1.4000 | 0.04822 | 170 | 115 | 42 | 13 |
708 | I TOLD you Fox news was going to burn in hell. | 1.4000 | 0.05237 | 170 | 121 | 30 | 19 |
709 | Black and white! Tube! Rabbit ears! Is there no end to their cruelty? | 1.3988 | 0.04969 | 173 | 120 | 37 | 16 |
710 | Rabbit ears and analog. We really ARE in Hell! | 1.3988 | 0.04933 | 168 | 115 | 39 | 14 |
711 | Don't blame me. I voted for Hillary. | 1.3988 | 0.05349 | 168 | 121 | 27 | 20 |
712 | Ive seen this one. | 1.3988 | 0.05076 | 168 | 117 | 35 | 16 |
713 | All we ever get is the Fireplace Channel. | 1.3988 | 0.05214 | 168 | 119 | 31 | 18 |
714 | We must be in the overflow room. | 1.3988 | 0.05005 | 168 | 116 | 37 | 15 |
715 | Turns out the only actual burning down here is the chlamydia. | 1.3964 | 0.05051 | 169 | 118 | 35 | 16 |
716 | I would have been a better person if I knew I’d be stuck watching standard definition for eternity. | 1.3952 | 0.04876 | 167 | 114 | 40 | 13 |
717 | Another orientation video? You've got to be kidding me. | 1.3952 | 0.04726 | 167 | 112 | 44 | 11 |
718 | It’s still better than ‘Keeping Up With The Karashians’. | 1.3952 | 0.05302 | 167 | 120 | 28 | 19 |
719 | I guess we're all about to feel the burn. | 1.3952 | 0.04876 | 167 | 114 | 40 | 13 |
720 | The only other channel is Fox News. | 1.3952 | 0.05164 | 167 | 118 | 32 | 17 |
721 | I never thought I would miss ads for hemorrhoid cream. | 1.3952 | 0.05164 | 167 | 118 | 32 | 17 |
722 | Don't worry. The camera adds 100 degrees. | 1.3952 | 0.04950 | 167 | 115 | 38 | 14 |
723 | I love movie night. | 1.3952 | 0.05164 | 167 | 118 | 32 | 17 |
724 | It was either this or reruns of The Apprentice. | 1.3952 | 0.05302 | 167 | 120 | 28 | 19 |
725 | Hey, turns out there really is a special place in hell for people who spoil movies! | 1.3952 | 0.05022 | 167 | 116 | 36 | 15 |
726 | I can’t believe we have to watch a safety video first. | 1.3952 | 0.05022 | 167 | 116 | 36 | 15 |
727 | The devil just said, "What you see on the screen is virtual hell. The real hell is other people." | 1.3952 | 0.05093 | 167 | 117 | 34 | 16 |
728 | I guess they were right. There is a special place in Hell for TV Satellite executives. | 1.3952 | 0.05022 | 167 | 116 | 36 | 15 |
729 | At the risk of sounding ungrateful, I'm a little disappointed. | 1.3952 | 0.04726 | 167 | 112 | 44 | 11 |
730 | What's puzzling me is the nature of his game. | 1.3952 | 0.05093 | 167 | 117 | 34 | 16 |
731 | Damn it! I've seen this one. | 1.3952 | 0.04571 | 167 | 110 | 48 | 9 |
732 | Welcome, contestants, to the final season of "Survivor'. | 1.3952 | 0.05093 | 167 | 117 | 34 | 16 |
733 | Why does he always get to choose the channel? | 1.3952 | 0.04802 | 167 | 113 | 42 | 12 |
734 | I knew Hell would be a timeshare presentation. | 1.3952 | 0.05502 | 167 | 123 | 22 | 22 |
735 | Seriously, the overflow room? The old TV, the crowding. It's all going in my Yelp review. | 1.3952 | 0.05022 | 167 | 116 | 36 | 15 |
736 | And the phones are rotary. | 1.3952 | 0.04802 | 167 | 113 | 42 | 12 |
737 | No cable, no high-definition, no big screen, no remote. This is hell. | 1.3952 | 0.05302 | 167 | 120 | 28 | 19 |
738 | Fancy seeing an old flame here. | 1.3952 | 0.05093 | 167 | 117 | 34 | 16 |
739 | Watching the fireplace channel for eternity may be hell, but it sure beats watching Trump. | 1.3952 | 0.04876 | 167 | 114 | 40 | 13 |
740 | I know his art films seem bad, but trust me, his poetry is the real torture. | 1.3952 | 0.04726 | 167 | 112 | 44 | 11 |
741 | The first season was better. | 1.3952 | 0.04876 | 167 | 114 | 40 | 13 |
742 | Wait, everyone here was a Nielsen family? Small world, isn't it! | 1.3952 | 0.05164 | 167 | 118 | 32 | 17 |
743 | Could be worse. I heard Circle Nine only gets Fox News. | 1.3939 | 0.05348 | 165 | 119 | 27 | 19 |
744 | It kinda takes the fun out of all of us being naked. | 1.3939 | 0.05348 | 165 | 119 | 27 | 19 |
745 | It’s okay, I guess. I just wish it was more like the book. | 1.3939 | 0.04840 | 165 | 112 | 41 | 12 |
746 | Isn't this a rerun? | 1.3939 | 0.04991 | 165 | 114 | 37 | 14 |
747 | Rabbit ear antenna, we must be in Hell! | 1.3939 | 0.04991 | 165 | 114 | 37 | 14 |
748 | Network TV and Rabbit Ears! This Is Hell! | 1.3939 | 0.05208 | 165 | 117 | 31 | 17 |
749 | I hate reality TV. | 1.3939 | 0.05278 | 165 | 118 | 29 | 18 |
750 | Only one channel? This is Hell! | 1.3939 | 0.05136 | 165 | 116 | 33 | 16 |
751 | Shortest orientation I've ever seen | 1.3935 | 0.05298 | 155 | 109 | 31 | 15 |
752 | I didn't think hell would be so... ironic. | 1.3926 | 0.05181 | 163 | 115 | 32 | 16 |
753 | The program is okay but nobody can act to save their soul. | 1.3926 | 0.05181 | 163 | 115 | 32 | 16 |
754 | This is a rerun, the real fire went out centuries ago. | 1.3926 | 0.05107 | 163 | 114 | 34 | 15 |
755 | No wonder this Airbnb was so cheap. | 1.3926 | 0.05253 | 163 | 116 | 30 | 17 |
756 | It may cost me an eternity, but I still say, "The book was better". | 1.3926 | 0.05107 | 163 | 114 | 34 | 15 |
757 | Well I’ll be damned... Rabbit Ears! | 1.3926 | 0.05253 | 163 | 116 | 30 | 17 |
758 | I think it's a rerun. | 1.3926 | 0.04722 | 163 | 109 | 44 | 10 |
759 | Looks like they have Comcast down here, too. | 1.3926 | 0.05181 | 163 | 115 | 32 | 16 |
760 | It's worse than I imagined! No color, no sound, no cable. | 1.3926 | 0.05107 | 163 | 114 | 34 | 15 |
761 | It's fake news — that's all we get down here. | 1.3926 | 0.05107 | 163 | 114 | 34 | 15 |
762 | Hi, I'm Phil. I like to think of myself as a devil may care sort of guy. | 1.3926 | 0.04879 | 163 | 111 | 40 | 12 |
763 | I murdered my entire family for this? | 1.3926 | 0.05253 | 163 | 116 | 30 | 17 |
764 | I can take the heat, but these White House press conferences are murder. | 1.3926 | 0.05395 | 163 | 118 | 26 | 19 |
765 | I agree, pledge week is torture. | 1.3926 | 0.04879 | 163 | 111 | 40 | 12 |
766 | I got burned on a similar time-share two years ago. | 1.3916 | 0.04892 | 166 | 114 | 39 | 13 |
767 | On Tuesdays we get reruns of 'Here Comes Honey Boo Boo'. | 1.3913 | 0.05226 | 161 | 114 | 31 | 16 |
768 | I sure hope that’s just a TV Yule log !! | 1.3913 | 0.05585 | 161 | 119 | 21 | 21 |
769 | This is not how I pictured it. | 1.3913 | 0.04759 | 161 | 108 | 43 | 10 |
770 | So, it really is just other people. | 1.3913 | 0.05300 | 161 | 115 | 29 | 17 |
771 | Travelogs always make the place look way better then it is. | 1.3913 | 0.05075 | 161 | 112 | 35 | 14 |
772 | We're okay. You can tell this is only Purgatory. No advertisements. | 1.3913 | 0.05151 | 161 | 113 | 33 | 15 |
773 | Due to budget cuts you must watch Hell instead of living in it | 1.3913 | 0.04920 | 161 | 110 | 39 | 12 |
774 | When I said those fireplace videos were my version of Hell I didn't think anyone was listening. | 1.3913 | 0.04920 | 161 | 110 | 39 | 12 |
775 | It's The Sean Hannity Show. 24/7 for Eternity. | 1.3913 | 0.05444 | 161 | 117 | 25 | 19 |
776 | Brimstone is not nearly as frightening in black-and-white. | 1.3913 | 0.04920 | 161 | 110 | 39 | 12 |
777 | I missed last week’s episode; what happened? | 1.3913 | 0.05075 | 161 | 112 | 35 | 14 |
778 | we're in analog hell... | 1.3913 | 0.05372 | 161 | 116 | 27 | 18 |
779 | This is the hellfire...Hannity's on at 9:00 for the brimstone. | 1.3913 | 0.04840 | 161 | 109 | 41 | 11 |
780 | That damn pitchfork is screwing up the reception | 1.3913 | 0.04759 | 161 | 108 | 43 | 10 |
781 | Limited channels, but excellent reception. | 1.3913 | 0.04998 | 161 | 111 | 37 | 13 |
782 | To be fair it’s his first film, but I agree it’s a little obvious. | 1.3913 | 0.04920 | 161 | 110 | 39 | 12 |
783 | What do you say we slip out for a cold one? | 1.3913 | 0.04998 | 161 | 111 | 37 | 13 |
784 | At least in purgatory we had high definition. | 1.3902 | 0.04454 | 164 | 107 | 50 | 7 |
785 | Well, I'll be damned --- the cooking channel! | 1.3899 | 0.04961 | 159 | 109 | 38 | 12 |
786 | Yes, in fact I did play the devil's advocate...I was an attorney for Donald Trump. | 1.3899 | 0.05040 | 159 | 110 | 36 | 13 |
787 | They say this is the birthplace of reality TV. | 1.3899 | 0.05347 | 159 | 114 | 28 | 17 |
788 | The screen-saver from Hell | 1.3899 | 0.05196 | 159 | 112 | 32 | 15 |
789 | Rabbit ears and a CRT? What kind of a hell-hole is this anyways? | 1.3899 | 0.04961 | 159 | 109 | 38 | 12 |
790 | Damn. Another infernal commercial. | 1.3899 | 0.05196 | 159 | 112 | 32 | 15 |
791 | You were a co-host of 'Fox and Friends,' too? | 1.3899 | 0.05347 | 159 | 114 | 28 | 17 |
792 | For $19.95 a month, you get 666 channels. | 1.3899 | 0.05040 | 159 | 110 | 36 | 13 |
793 | I guess this is the origin of that fireplace log video. | 1.3899 | 0.05040 | 159 | 110 | 36 | 13 |
794 | The Weather Report says it will be hot as hell tomorrow | 1.3899 | 0.05196 | 159 | 112 | 32 | 15 |
795 | It's pretty much the same forecast every day. | 1.3899 | 0.04629 | 159 | 105 | 46 | 8 |
796 | They say the camera adds 10 degrees | 1.3899 | 0.05040 | 159 | 110 | 36 | 13 |
797 | You must be new here, we haven't had real fire since 2013. Now we just stream Netflix and and chill. | 1.3899 | 0.04961 | 159 | 109 | 38 | 12 |
798 | I hear in heaven they're watching The Ten Commandments. | 1.3899 | 0.05272 | 159 | 113 | 30 | 16 |
799 | I know this is important, but I wonder if you're busy later. | 1.3899 | 0.04798 | 159 | 107 | 42 | 10 |
800 | They’ve lost some of the ambiance, but it’s much better for air quality. | 1.3893 | 0.05793 | 131 | 93 | 25 | 13 |
801 | They do switch to Hannity at 10. | 1.3885 | 0.04921 | 157 | 107 | 39 | 11 |
802 | I'm sorry. That really was my hand. | 1.3885 | 0.05242 | 157 | 111 | 31 | 15 |
803 | Look on the bright side, it could be Fox News. | 1.3885 | 0.04921 | 157 | 107 | 39 | 11 |
804 | I gotta say the reception down here is better than I expected... | 1.3885 | 0.04752 | 157 | 105 | 43 | 9 |
805 | If you wanted cable, you would have had to lead a much better life. | 1.3885 | 0.04921 | 157 | 107 | 39 | 11 |
806 | Cutbacks. | 1.3885 | 0.04921 | 157 | 107 | 39 | 11 |
807 | I heard that, in the 5th circle, they let you watch the flames from an app on your phone. | 1.3885 | 0.04921 | 157 | 107 | 39 | 11 |
808 | I don't want a timeshare either, but we don't get the buffet tickets until after the presentation. | 1.3885 | 0.05084 | 157 | 109 | 35 | 13 |
809 | ..I thought this would be a more immersive experience. | 1.3875 | 0.04855 | 160 | 109 | 40 | 11 |
810 | At least the news is the same down here. | 1.3875 | 0.04855 | 160 | 109 | 40 | 11 |
811 | I get the whole eternal damnation thing, but does Satan really need to hog the remote? | 1.3865 | 0.05173 | 163 | 116 | 31 | 16 |
812 | It's hell when he controls the remote | 1.3861 | 0.05057 | 158 | 110 | 35 | 13 |
813 | How did I know that they would only get FOX news? | 1.3861 | 0.05515 | 158 | 116 | 23 | 19 |
814 | I hate reality programming. | 1.3853 | 0.06101 | 109 | 76 | 24 | 9 |
815 | The real torture? He keeps repeating that "hell-evision" joke. | 1.3851 | 0.05066 | 161 | 113 | 34 | 14 |
816 | It’s better than watching Fox. | 1.3846 | 0.05339 | 156 | 112 | 28 | 16 |
817 | Since Hell froze over on November 8, 2016, there are only fake flames. | 1.3846 | 0.05492 | 156 | 114 | 24 | 18 |
818 | Now that it's frozen over, do you think they'll give us coats? | 1.3846 | 0.04678 | 156 | 104 | 44 | 8 |
819 | I bet in heaven it's a flat screen. | 1.3846 | 0.05182 | 156 | 110 | 32 | 14 |
820 | I love movie night. | 1.3846 | 0.04936 | 156 | 107 | 38 | 11 |
821 | An analog TV and only one channel? These guys are damned good at this Hell thing. | 1.3846 | 0.05182 | 156 | 110 | 32 | 14 |
822 | Rabbit ears? This MUST be Hell. | 1.3846 | 0.05182 | 156 | 110 | 32 | 14 |
823 | Apparently the only other channel is Fox News. | 1.3846 | 0.05339 | 156 | 112 | 28 | 16 |
824 | I'm going to ask him if we can put the game on, just this once. | 1.3846 | 0.05101 | 156 | 109 | 34 | 13 |
825 | I didn't sin as much as I did just to end up watching shitty tv. | 1.3846 | 0.05101 | 156 | 109 | 34 | 13 |
826 | Welcome to hell for millenials! | 1.3846 | 0.05339 | 156 | 112 | 28 | 16 |
827 | Thank God. We are finally free of all the Religious nut jobs. | 1.3846 | 0.05182 | 156 | 110 | 32 | 14 |
828 | At least there are no commercials. | 1.3846 | 0.05020 | 156 | 108 | 36 | 12 |
829 | At least now I know why they let me keep my glasses. | 1.3846 | 0.05020 | 156 | 108 | 36 | 12 |
830 | At least it's commercial-free. | 1.3846 | 0.05020 | 156 | 108 | 36 | 12 |
831 | Having to watch Sarah Huckabee Sanders and Kellyanne Conway for Eternity....Why do you think they call this HELL | 1.3846 | 0.05416 | 156 | 113 | 26 | 17 |
832 | On Tuesdays we get to watch paint dry. | 1.3846 | 0.04852 | 156 | 106 | 40 | 10 |
833 | That concludes the orientation. Please exit on the left into the flames, and remember: don't swim in the lake of fire after eating. | 1.3841 | 0.05277 | 138 | 95 | 33 | 10 |
834 | I heard the book's better | 1.3831 | 0.05388 | 154 | 111 | 27 | 16 |
835 | I bet they have a flat screen in heaven. | 1.3831 | 0.05228 | 154 | 109 | 31 | 14 |
836 | You know what's worse? The remote's missing. | 1.3831 | 0.04978 | 154 | 106 | 37 | 11 |
837 | Well, at least it's not reruns of "The Apprentice" | 1.3831 | 0.04978 | 154 | 106 | 37 | 11 |
838 | This is hell - analog tv with no remote! | 1.3831 | 0.05228 | 154 | 109 | 31 | 14 |
839 | Have I missed anything? | 1.3831 | 0.05063 | 154 | 107 | 35 | 12 |
840 | Due to funding cuts, eternal torment has been outsourced to Capita. | 1.3831 | 0.04716 | 154 | 103 | 43 | 8 |
841 | I hate documentaries. | 1.3831 | 0.05228 | 154 | 109 | 31 | 14 |
842 | It's just a preview of coming attractions. | 1.3831 | 0.04805 | 154 | 104 | 41 | 9 |
843 | Why are waiting room televisions always tuned to Fox News? | 1.3831 | 0.05466 | 154 | 112 | 25 | 17 |
844 | Hell is apparently now on earth, so they are providing us with video. | 1.3831 | 0.04892 | 154 | 105 | 39 | 10 |
845 | Hannity's coming on. | 1.3831 | 0.05228 | 154 | 109 | 31 | 14 |
846 | Doesn't he know this would be more evil on Facebook live-stream? | 1.3831 | 0.05063 | 154 | 107 | 35 | 12 |
847 | The commercials are worse. | 1.3831 | 0.05146 | 154 | 108 | 33 | 13 |
848 | It appears we're in Hell's green room | 1.3831 | 0.04892 | 154 | 105 | 39 | 10 |
849 | Yes, it's PBS. But, it could have been reruns of The Apprentice! | 1.3831 | 0.04978 | 154 | 106 | 37 | 11 |
850 | Ugh, I've seen this safety video a thousand times. | 1.3822 | 0.04742 | 157 | 106 | 42 | 9 |
851 | It’s either this or FOX. | 1.3822 | 0.05075 | 157 | 110 | 34 | 13 |
852 | I thought the Trump Channel was only on cable. | 1.3816 | 0.05107 | 152 | 106 | 34 | 12 |
853 | Talk about the orientation from hell. | 1.3816 | 0.05192 | 152 | 107 | 32 | 13 |
854 | Uh-oh, it's a cooking show. | 1.3816 | 0.05021 | 152 | 105 | 36 | 11 |
855 | Do you still think watching the promotional video for a free stay was a good idea? | 1.3816 | 0.05107 | 152 | 106 | 34 | 12 |
856 | I know I shouldn't complain, but I was expecting something more interactive. | 1.3816 | 0.04934 | 152 | 104 | 38 | 10 |
857 | Yes, this is hell. Heaven has a flat screen with 600 channels of cable. | 1.3816 | 0.05438 | 152 | 110 | 26 | 16 |
858 | I found this tour on Groupon. | 1.3816 | 0.05275 | 152 | 108 | 30 | 14 |
859 | I knew this was going to be avant-garde, but Jerry, give me one good reason why we're naked. | 1.3816 | 0.04934 | 152 | 104 | 38 | 10 |
860 | I heard he's trying to lower his carbon footprint. | 1.3803 | 0.05167 | 142 | 98 | 34 | 10 |
861 | Black and white TV? Now I know we're in hell! | 1.3800 | 0.05324 | 150 | 107 | 29 | 14 |
862 | I heard the previews last forever. | 1.3800 | 0.05239 | 150 | 106 | 31 | 13 |
863 | It’s perpetually Episode 1 Season 1. Get used to it. | 1.3800 | 0.04976 | 150 | 103 | 37 | 10 |
864 | Did I miss anything? | 1.3800 | 0.05239 | 150 | 106 | 31 | 13 |
865 | It's either this or Fox News. | 1.3800 | 0.05153 | 150 | 105 | 33 | 12 |
866 | Apparently hell means no diversity. | 1.3800 | 0.05153 | 150 | 105 | 33 | 12 |
867 | The first circle is just black and white. | 1.3800 | 0.05324 | 150 | 107 | 29 | 14 |
868 | The Weather Channel is monotonous here. | 1.3800 | 0.05239 | 150 | 106 | 31 | 13 |
869 | It's not so much the heat as the humidity | 1.3800 | 0.05065 | 150 | 104 | 35 | 11 |
870 | If I'd known this was all it was going to be, I'd have killed a LOT more people. | 1.3800 | 0.05324 | 150 | 107 | 29 | 14 |
871 | I assume he doesn't realize that this is less torturous than 24 hours of Fox News. | 1.3800 | 0.05570 | 150 | 110 | 23 | 17 |
872 | Please watch this safety video before we proceed to the river Styx. | 1.3800 | 0.05324 | 150 | 107 | 29 | 14 |
873 | It's nice, but I miss the searing heat. | 1.3800 | 0.05324 | 150 | 107 | 29 | 14 |
874 | It's nice to get some news from the world above. | 1.3800 | 0.05324 | 150 | 107 | 29 | 14 |
875 | It's the Weather Channel. | 1.3800 | 0.05407 | 150 | 108 | 27 | 15 |
876 | There's a 30 minute orientation on fire and brimstone followed by a hot lunch. | 1.3800 | 0.04885 | 150 | 102 | 39 | 9 |
877 | We're "virtually" burning in hell... | 1.3800 | 0.05065 | 150 | 104 | 35 | 11 |
878 | He signed on to the Paris Climate Accord. | 1.3800 | 0.05407 | 150 | 108 | 27 | 15 |
879 | It's true . . . I always hated those fake fireplaces | 1.3800 | 0.05407 | 150 | 108 | 27 | 15 |
880 | It'll be an eternity until they upgrade to cable. | 1.3800 | 0.04976 | 150 | 103 | 37 | 10 |
881 | I don’t know about you, but I was expecting real flames | 1.3800 | 0.05153 | 150 | 105 | 33 | 12 |
882 | I hear they have cable upstairs. | 1.3800 | 0.04793 | 150 | 101 | 41 | 8 |
883 | I saw this one in the theaters. You don't see the end coming. | 1.3800 | 0.05324 | 150 | 107 | 29 | 14 |
884 | It's Lucifer's remake of the classic "Some Like It Hot" | 1.3800 | 0.04976 | 150 | 103 | 37 | 10 |
885 | 12” screen, rabbit ears and only 1 channel; this really is hell! | 1.3796 | 0.05873 | 137 | 101 | 20 | 16 |
886 | You could say we are comfortably dressed for the occasion. | 1.3791 | 0.04819 | 153 | 104 | 40 | 9 |
887 | Things have gotten much better down here since we went virtual. | 1.3786 | 0.04911 | 140 | 94 | 39 | 7 |
888 | I've never been a fan of Reality TV. | 1.3784 | 0.05110 | 148 | 103 | 34 | 11 |
889 | Hey, turns out there really is a special place in hell for people who spoil the ending! | 1.3784 | 0.05542 | 148 | 108 | 24 | 16 |
890 | This is just the warm-up. Next is "Keeping Up with the Kardashians." | 1.3784 | 0.05199 | 148 | 104 | 32 | 12 |
891 | I think it would look better in color --- just sayin. | 1.3784 | 0.05199 | 148 | 104 | 32 | 12 |
892 | After the safety video, I’ll need you to sign the liability waiver. | 1.3784 | 0.05542 | 148 | 108 | 24 | 16 |
893 | I was expecting fire and brimstone, not "Fox and Friends." | 1.3784 | 0.05110 | 148 | 103 | 34 | 11 |
894 | Hannity'll be on after the informercial | 1.3784 | 0.05287 | 148 | 105 | 30 | 13 |
895 | I found the book to be a lot more compelling. | 1.3784 | 0.04927 | 148 | 101 | 38 | 9 |
896 | Don't worry, these presentations exaggerate everything. I used to sell timeshares. | 1.3784 | 0.05287 | 148 | 105 | 30 | 13 |
897 | I love previews! | 1.3784 | 0.05287 | 148 | 105 | 30 | 13 |
898 | Rabbit ears? In 2018? Really? | 1.3784 | 0.05458 | 148 | 107 | 26 | 15 |
899 | I miss fake news. | 1.3784 | 0.05019 | 148 | 102 | 36 | 10 |
900 | Reruns. | 1.3784 | 0.05110 | 148 | 103 | 34 | 11 |
901 | "This is hell, it's stuck on the local weather channel". | 1.3784 | 0.05019 | 148 | 102 | 36 | 10 |
902 | You gotta give the devil his due. It is more environmentally friendly. | 1.3784 | 0.05110 | 148 | 103 | 34 | 11 |
903 | And I thought daytime TV was hell. | 1.3784 | 0.05110 | 148 | 103 | 34 | 11 |
904 | I guess we're not freezing over anytime soon. | 1.3784 | 0.05373 | 148 | 106 | 28 | 14 |
905 | Ah...to set the mood, I guess... | 1.3768 | 0.05060 | 138 | 94 | 36 | 8 |
906 | I hear we have to watch all the ads down here, too. | 1.3767 | 0.05064 | 146 | 101 | 35 | 10 |
907 | I'm so tired of reality TV | 1.3767 | 0.05510 | 146 | 106 | 25 | 15 |
908 | Who would have believed the Scientologists were right? | 1.3767 | 0.05424 | 146 | 105 | 27 | 14 |
909 | AND there is no remote control | 1.3767 | 0.04776 | 146 | 98 | 41 | 7 |
910 | He waits until we're late into each episode before he spoils the ending. | 1.3767 | 0.05064 | 146 | 101 | 35 | 10 |
911 | Last season was way better | 1.3767 | 0.04969 | 146 | 100 | 37 | 9 |
912 | It's either this or reruns of Sean Hannity. | 1.3767 | 0.05424 | 146 | 105 | 27 | 14 |
913 | Yes, I heard this happens when you try to get out of your cable contract. | 1.3767 | 0.05064 | 146 | 101 | 35 | 10 |
914 | My cousin on the level below says they're showing season two of "The Jersey Shore" | 1.3767 | 0.05247 | 146 | 103 | 31 | 12 |
915 | The news doesn't look any different down here. | 1.3767 | 0.05336 | 146 | 104 | 29 | 13 |
916 | Who knew my punishment in hell would be watching the burning log channel for eternity? | 1.3767 | 0.05247 | 146 | 103 | 31 | 12 |
917 | Oh great, I've seen this one. | 1.3767 | 0.05510 | 146 | 106 | 25 | 15 |
918 | I heard next week we start getting "Cosby Show" reruns. | 1.3767 | 0.05336 | 146 | 104 | 29 | 13 |
919 | At least they have FOX News down here.... | 1.3767 | 0.05510 | 146 | 106 | 25 | 15 |
920 | You were in entertainment litigation? So was I! | 1.3767 | 0.05156 | 146 | 102 | 33 | 11 |
921 | Damned if I know. | 1.3767 | 0.05247 | 146 | 103 | 31 | 12 |
922 | I wonder what it did to end up down here | 1.3767 | 0.05247 | 146 | 103 | 31 | 12 |
923 | This year's Burning Man is on a whole other level | 1.3767 | 0.05156 | 146 | 102 | 33 | 11 |
924 | I heard in Purgatory they get Dish TV and HBO. | 1.3767 | 0.05336 | 146 | 104 | 29 | 13 |
925 | Can we switch to the airconditioning channel? | 1.3767 | 0.05156 | 146 | 102 | 33 | 11 |
926 | Steve's cock is smaller than I'd pictured. | 1.3767 | 0.05510 | 146 | 106 | 25 | 15 |
927 | This really is hell. We liberals get only Fox New forever while the conservatives get all of PBS. | 1.3767 | 0.05510 | 146 | 106 | 25 | 15 |
928 | The hellfire is just virtual? Wow, if I'd known that, I would have done a whole lot more sinning. | 1.3767 | 0.05064 | 146 | 101 | 35 | 10 |
929 | When does the State of the Union address start? | 1.3767 | 0.05336 | 146 | 104 | 29 | 13 |
930 | Rabbit ears?!? I knew there was a special place in hell reserved for those! | 1.3767 | 0.05247 | 146 | 103 | 31 | 12 |
931 | No cable and no flatscreens. Well... I guess we’re really here. | 1.3758 | 0.05257 | 149 | 106 | 30 | 13 |
932 | It's called HELLevision! | 1.3741 | 0.05127 | 147 | 103 | 33 | 11 |
933 | Thank goodness we still get Fox News | 1.3741 | 0.05306 | 147 | 105 | 29 | 13 |
934 | It's one of their original series. | 1.3741 | 0.05127 | 147 | 103 | 33 | 11 |
935 | Oh, hey Susan. | 1.3741 | 0.05710 | 139 | 102 | 22 | 15 |
936 | I haven’t seen rabbit ears for eternity. | 1.3724 | 0.05174 | 145 | 102 | 32 | 11 |
937 | And you thought reality TV was hell before we died. | 1.3724 | 0.05174 | 145 | 102 | 32 | 11 |
938 | I don't mind the overflow room. | 1.3724 | 0.05174 | 145 | 102 | 32 | 11 |
939 | Coming Attractions! Isn't that a little over the top? | 1.3724 | 0.05080 | 145 | 101 | 34 | 10 |
940 | Don't you miss marshmallows? | 1.3724 | 0.04985 | 145 | 100 | 36 | 9 |
941 | Let's offer him our souls in exchange for cable. | 1.3724 | 0.05265 | 145 | 103 | 30 | 12 |
942 | This is the tenth circle of Hell - political junkies. We are condemned to watch local C-SPAN for eternity. | 1.3724 | 0.05265 | 145 | 103 | 30 | 12 |
943 | Orientations are Hell. | 1.3724 | 0.05080 | 145 | 101 | 34 | 10 |
944 | It's just a preview of coming attractions. | 1.3724 | 0.04888 | 145 | 99 | 38 | 8 |
945 | Only the big sinners get to be there in person. | 1.3724 | 0.05174 | 145 | 102 | 32 | 11 |
946 | Worst.Timeshare.Promo.Ever. | 1.3724 | 0.05444 | 145 | 105 | 26 | 14 |
947 | The commentator said the definition of hell is nudity over forty. | 1.3724 | 0.05356 | 145 | 104 | 28 | 13 |
948 | No remote.... | 1.3724 | 0.05080 | 145 | 101 | 34 | 10 |
949 | Oh good. We can see "Fox and Friends" | 1.3724 | 0.05265 | 145 | 103 | 30 | 12 |
950 | Reception is good here. | 1.3724 | 0.05080 | 145 | 101 | 34 | 10 |
951 | The nudity is a surprise, but it's still hell without a remote. | 1.3724 | 0.05080 | 145 | 101 | 34 | 10 |
952 | It was this or Fox and Friends. | 1.3724 | 0.05618 | 145 | 107 | 22 | 16 |
953 | A cathode ray TV, of course this is Hell. | 1.3724 | 0.05174 | 145 | 102 | 32 | 11 |
954 | If you think this is hell, just wait for the infomercial! | 1.3724 | 0.04985 | 145 | 100 | 36 | 9 |
955 | Welcome to Hell. After you finish watching the informative video, you will have a chance to use the sauna. | 1.3724 | 0.05356 | 145 | 104 | 28 | 13 |
956 | Finally. He promised he'd be here to install it in 1956. | 1.3724 | 0.05265 | 145 | 103 | 30 | 12 |
957 | Well, at least there are no commercials. | 1.3724 | 0.05080 | 145 | 101 | 34 | 10 |
958 | Roseanne is on next. | 1.3724 | 0.05532 | 145 | 106 | 24 | 15 |
959 | Orientation is so boring. Let's get started already. Right? | 1.3724 | 0.04985 | 145 | 100 | 36 | 9 |
960 | Didn’t I see you at the innaugaration? | 1.3724 | 0.05444 | 145 | 105 | 26 | 14 |
961 | I hear there's a hot tub in every room. | 1.3723 | 0.05181 | 137 | 95 | 33 | 9 |
962 | We get real fire only when Hell starts to freeze over. Otherwise, it's just reruns. | 1.3706 | 0.05126 | 143 | 100 | 33 | 10 |
963 | God warned Eve not to get an Apple TV but she just had to get one, didn't she? | 1.3706 | 0.05586 | 143 | 105 | 23 | 15 |
964 | We got him off coal but going solar is gonna be an uphill battle. | 1.3706 | 0.05126 | 143 | 100 | 33 | 10 |
965 | 24-hour Fox News. Who knew. | 1.3706 | 0.05673 | 143 | 106 | 21 | 16 |
966 | They say TV adds 10 degrees. | 1.3706 | 0.05315 | 143 | 102 | 29 | 12 |
967 | It's not the heat -- it's the morbidity. | 1.3699 | 0.05235 | 146 | 104 | 30 | 12 |
968 | Whaaat? Black and white? This is hell! | 1.3688 | 0.05173 | 141 | 99 | 32 | 10 |
969 | In heaven you get to change the channel. | 1.3688 | 0.05270 | 141 | 100 | 30 | 11 |
970 | Can we move closer? I'm still cold. | 1.3688 | 0.04870 | 141 | 96 | 38 | 7 |
971 | I’ve never been a fan of the coming attractions. | 1.3688 | 0.05074 | 141 | 98 | 34 | 9 |
972 | Thank Satan we don't have to watch any more cat videos. | 1.3688 | 0.04765 | 141 | 95 | 40 | 6 |
973 | It could be worse. They could be showing 'Hannity'. | 1.3688 | 0.05459 | 141 | 102 | 26 | 13 |
974 | They were right it did go to hell. | 1.3688 | 0.05173 | 141 | 99 | 32 | 10 |
975 | Do you think it would be rude if I asked to change the channel? | 1.3688 | 0.05459 | 141 | 102 | 26 | 13 |
976 | Fox News is all they can get here | 1.3688 | 0.05551 | 141 | 103 | 24 | 14 |
977 | Yes, we are in the real Hell, rabbit ears reception on a Black and White TV | 1.3688 | 0.05459 | 141 | 102 | 26 | 13 |
978 | Another orientation meeting? Boy, this place really is Hell | 1.3688 | 0.05459 | 141 | 102 | 26 | 13 |
979 | The only other two channels are a burning fireplace and Billy Graham. | 1.3688 | 0.05551 | 141 | 103 | 24 | 14 |
980 | Rabbit ears? We’re in heaven...Hell has 800 cable channels but nothing’s on.... | 1.3688 | 0.05459 | 141 | 102 | 26 | 13 |
981 | This may sound stupid, but I can't help but feel disappointed. | 1.3688 | 0.05173 | 141 | 99 | 32 | 10 |
982 | Who here thinks this is fake news? | 1.3688 | 0.05459 | 141 | 102 | 26 | 13 |
983 | So ... are you here for eternity ... or ... | 1.3688 | 0.05551 | 141 | 103 | 24 | 14 |
984 | Hey, turns out there really is a special place in hell for people who spoil movies! | 1.3688 | 0.05365 | 141 | 101 | 28 | 12 |
985 | 0h, no --another Oval Office meltdown! | 1.3688 | 0.05365 | 141 | 101 | 28 | 12 |
986 | I dare you to change the channel | 1.3688 | 0.05173 | 141 | 99 | 32 | 10 |
987 | This is pure hell. It's the same on every channel. | 1.3688 | 0.05551 | 141 | 103 | 24 | 14 |
988 | The only thing worse than Hell is this orientation video. | 1.3688 | 0.05365 | 141 | 101 | 28 | 12 |
989 | I heard if Satan doesn't show up in the first 15 minutes you can leave. | 1.3688 | 0.05270 | 141 | 100 | 30 | 11 |
990 | The road to hell is paved with fake news. | 1.3688 | 0.05173 | 141 | 99 | 32 | 10 |
991 | Black and White with rabbit ears, this must be hell | 1.3688 | 0.04973 | 141 | 97 | 36 | 8 |
992 | My ministry swindled enough people of their life savings to afford this upgrade. And you? | 1.3688 | 0.05173 | 141 | 99 | 32 | 10 |
993 | So the Devil does NOT wear Prada? | 1.3688 | 0.04973 | 141 | 97 | 36 | 8 |
994 | There's no chance we'll get a snowy picture. | 1.3688 | 0.05173 | 141 | 99 | 32 | 10 |
995 | There was a much better selection of channels in purgatory. | 1.3688 | 0.05270 | 141 | 100 | 30 | 11 |
996 | It’s Purgatory ... with benefits. | 1.3669 | 0.05698 | 139 | 103 | 21 | 15 |
997 | It's the 13495738293584635th season and they will never cancel it. | 1.3669 | 0.05417 | 139 | 100 | 27 | 12 |
998 | (Sigh) So it’s true. All they have down here is the Hallmark channel. | 1.3669 | 0.05221 | 139 | 98 | 31 | 10 |
999 | Looks like McLuhan was right - the medium is the message. | 1.3669 | 0.04912 | 139 | 95 | 37 | 7 |
1000 | So it's going to be an eternity of watching the Yule Log channel? | 1.3669 | 0.05221 | 139 | 98 | 31 | 10 |
1001 | Spoiler alert. | 1.3669 | 0.05698 | 139 | 103 | 21 | 15 |
1002 | Last season was better... | 1.3669 | 0.05320 | 139 | 99 | 29 | 11 |
1003 | Firefox. How ironic. | 1.3662 | 0.05608 | 142 | 105 | 22 | 15 |
1004 | But it's a dry heat. | 1.3662 | 0.05239 | 142 | 101 | 30 | 11 |
1005 | It's the preview of what's next. | 1.3662 | 0.05239 | 142 | 101 | 30 | 11 |
1006 | Just to let you know, the weather reports here are totally predictable. | 1.3662 | 0.05239 | 142 | 101 | 30 | 11 |
1007 | Notice how they're showing more boobs in The New Yorker? | 1.3650 | 0.05371 | 137 | 98 | 28 | 11 |
1008 | It’s hell. Only reality TV. | 1.3650 | 0.05270 | 137 | 97 | 30 | 10 |
1009 | This is a rerun. | 1.3650 | 0.05470 | 137 | 99 | 26 | 12 |
1010 | I knew it. Eternal Fox news. | 1.3650 | 0.05470 | 137 | 99 | 26 | 12 |
1011 | Worse yet, it's reruns. | 1.3650 | 0.05470 | 137 | 99 | 26 | 12 |
1012 | And now for a brief message from our sponsor. | 1.3650 | 0.05567 | 137 | 100 | 24 | 13 |
1013 | It's not what I would call 'binge-worthy.' | 1.3650 | 0.05270 | 137 | 97 | 30 | 10 |
1014 | This is the hottest show on tv. | 1.3650 | 0.05371 | 137 | 98 | 28 | 11 |
1015 | ”It looks so much hotter in the ad”. | 1.3650 | 0.05063 | 137 | 95 | 34 | 8 |
1016 | I had no idea hell meant I'd have to watch fox news forever. | 1.3650 | 0.05941 | 137 | 104 | 16 | 17 |
1017 | It's either this or re-runs of "The Apprentice". | 1.3650 | 0.05167 | 137 | 96 | 32 | 9 |
1018 | We're toast! | 1.3650 | 0.05567 | 137 | 100 | 24 | 13 |
1019 | The cable installer said he would come when hell freezes over. | 1.3650 | 0.05470 | 137 | 99 | 26 | 12 |
1020 | The worst part is there’s no remote. | 1.3650 | 0.05270 | 137 | 97 | 30 | 10 |
1021 | Reality TV producer? Me, too! | 1.3650 | 0.05567 | 137 | 100 | 24 | 13 |
1022 | Must be a preview of coming attractions. | 1.3650 | 0.04955 | 137 | 94 | 36 | 7 |
1023 | If money is the root of all evil you'd think they could afford HDTV. | 1.3650 | 0.05371 | 137 | 98 | 28 | 11 |
1024 | Turns out, the road to hell was paved with bad reality TV. | 1.3650 | 0.05063 | 137 | 95 | 34 | 8 |
1025 | It's more fuel efficient. | 1.3650 | 0.05567 | 137 | 100 | 24 | 13 |
1026 | Here comes the safety video | 1.3650 | 0.05063 | 137 | 95 | 34 | 8 |
1027 | No cable or satellite. This really is hell! | 1.3650 | 0.05371 | 137 | 98 | 28 | 11 |
1028 | Now first, we're going to watch a short video about our sexual harassment policies here. | 1.3650 | 0.05663 | 137 | 101 | 22 | 14 |
1029 | The only show we get is the Hawaiian lava flow. | 1.3650 | 0.05371 | 137 | 98 | 28 | 11 |
1030 | This is Dante's sixth level of hell. They make us watch FOX News. | 1.3650 | 0.05470 | 137 | 99 | 26 | 12 |
1031 | You all said "over hell or high water" you'd support the president, well, guess what? | 1.3650 | 0.05371 | 137 | 98 | 28 | 11 |
1032 | They're working on getting a live feed from the White House. | 1.3650 | 0.05270 | 137 | 97 | 30 | 10 |
1033 | First level: black and white. Next level, no remote. Third, remotes for each of us. | 1.3650 | 0.05270 | 137 | 97 | 30 | 10 |
1034 | We're lucky, I heard that if you were really bad they make you watch "The View". | 1.3650 | 0.05167 | 137 | 96 | 32 | 9 |
1035 | Let's hope this Inferno thing is just one season. | 1.3650 | 0.05270 | 137 | 97 | 30 | 10 |
1036 | It feels like we’ve been waiting an eternity for the cable guy to show up. | 1.3650 | 0.05371 | 137 | 98 | 28 | 11 |
1037 | I can deal with the heat. Having to watch Hannity on an endless loop is the real torture. | 1.3650 | 0.05470 | 137 | 99 | 26 | 12 |
1038 | Who knew that the ads would still be the worst part. | 1.3650 | 0.05371 | 137 | 98 | 28 | 11 |
1039 | This focus group sucks. | 1.3650 | 0.05371 | 137 | 98 | 28 | 11 |
1040 | ‘That’s the power of prayer for you,Fox News went to Hell.’ | 1.3650 | 0.05470 | 137 | 99 | 26 | 12 |
1041 | I remember White House press briefings a bit differently. | 1.3650 | 0.05167 | 137 | 96 | 32 | 9 |
1042 | Brimstone shortage. It's all digital now. | 1.3650 | 0.05371 | 137 | 98 | 28 | 11 |
1043 | This isn't the worse part. Wait until you see the commercials. | 1.3630 | 0.05216 | 135 | 95 | 31 | 9 |
1044 | When I said I wanted to heat things up in the bedroom, this isn't what I had in mind. | 1.3630 | 0.05216 | 135 | 95 | 31 | 9 |
1045 | I wonder if they have flat screens in heaven. | 1.3630 | 0.05525 | 135 | 98 | 25 | 12 |
1046 | Fox and Friends has gone to hell lately. | 1.3630 | 0.05721 | 135 | 100 | 21 | 14 |
1047 | Better reception than I expected. | 1.3630 | 0.05624 | 135 | 99 | 23 | 13 |
1048 | An analog TV? What kind of hell is this? | 1.3630 | 0.05525 | 135 | 98 | 25 | 12 |
1049 | Are you sure this is the right Burning Man? | 1.3630 | 0.05424 | 135 | 97 | 27 | 11 |
1050 | An eternity of watching the Yule Log on an old Philco. Who knew? | 1.3630 | 0.05525 | 135 | 98 | 25 | 12 |
1051 | It lowers our carbon footprint. | 1.3630 | 0.05109 | 135 | 94 | 33 | 8 |
1052 | At least there's no commercials. | 1.3630 | 0.05525 | 135 | 98 | 25 | 12 |
1053 | Rumor is that it streams live on all 666 channels. | 1.3630 | 0.05109 | 135 | 94 | 33 | 8 |
1054 | Looks like we only get the Hellmark Channel down here. | 1.3630 | 0.05321 | 135 | 96 | 29 | 10 |
1055 | It’s the only way he can get Baby Boomers to pay attention. | 1.3630 | 0.05424 | 135 | 97 | 27 | 11 |
1056 | Looks like Trump stiffed the cable company again. | 1.3630 | 0.05817 | 135 | 101 | 19 | 15 |
1057 | I know it's hell, but still...rabbit ears?? | 1.3630 | 0.05424 | 135 | 97 | 27 | 11 |
1058 | It gets worse, the only other channel is Fox News. | 1.3630 | 0.05424 | 135 | 97 | 27 | 11 |
1059 | This is Naked and Afraid. Truth or Consequences is in studio B. | 1.3630 | 0.05424 | 135 | 97 | 27 | 11 |
1060 | Previews of coming attractions | 1.3630 | 0.05216 | 135 | 95 | 31 | 9 |
1061 | My wife told me I'd end up here if I kept watching porn videos. Guess I got the last laugh. | 1.3630 | 0.05216 | 135 | 95 | 31 | 9 |
1062 | One tv station was always my vision of hell. | 1.3630 | 0.05321 | 135 | 96 | 29 | 10 |
1063 | Art really does imitate life. | 1.3630 | 0.05525 | 135 | 98 | 25 | 12 |
1064 | Is this Channel 666? | 1.3630 | 0.05424 | 135 | 97 | 27 | 11 |
1065 | What the hell? Does he ever let anyone else choose what to watch? | 1.3630 | 0.05321 | 135 | 96 | 29 | 10 |
1066 | They call this hell?!? I used to be in charge of Trump's tweets! | 1.3630 | 0.05624 | 135 | 99 | 23 | 13 |
1067 | At least down here the weather report is accurate. | 1.3630 | 0.04888 | 135 | 92 | 37 | 6 |
1068 | I never pay attention to orientation videos | 1.3630 | 0.05424 | 135 | 97 | 27 | 11 |
1069 | Well, at least the news is better. | 1.3630 | 0.05216 | 135 | 95 | 31 | 9 |
1070 | Fake news. | 1.3630 | 0.05525 | 135 | 98 | 25 | 12 |
1071 | I hate reality shows. | 1.3630 | 0.05624 | 135 | 99 | 23 | 13 |
1072 | I'm late to the orientation - did they already give out the wi-fi password? | 1.3623 | 0.05137 | 138 | 97 | 32 | 9 |
1073 | He knew about global warming centuries ago. | 1.3623 | 0.05137 | 138 | 97 | 32 | 9 |
1074 | When I said those fireplace videos were my vision of Hell I didn't think anybody was listening. | 1.3609 | 0.05266 | 133 | 94 | 30 | 9 |
1075 | And now, your Local on the 8s. Chance of hellfire 100% | 1.3609 | 0.05266 | 133 | 94 | 30 | 9 |
1076 | These orientation videos bore the hell out of me | 1.3609 | 0.05373 | 133 | 95 | 28 | 10 |
1077 | Press Briefing. | 1.3609 | 0.05045 | 133 | 92 | 34 | 7 |
1078 | Only C-SPAN? We really are in hell. | 1.3609 | 0.05373 | 133 | 95 | 28 | 10 |
1079 | Oh, great--an eternity of black & white TV | 1.3609 | 0.05266 | 133 | 94 | 30 | 9 |
1080 | Damn! I would have been a better person if Revelation had warned about an eternity of Reality TV instead of just the whole 'fiery lake of burning sulfur' thing. | 1.3609 | 0.05156 | 133 | 93 | 32 | 8 |
1081 | Frankly, I'm getting tired of reality TV. | 1.3609 | 0.05478 | 133 | 96 | 26 | 11 |
1082 | No cable, no remote- this really IS Hell. | 1.3609 | 0.05879 | 133 | 100 | 18 | 15 |
1083 | He’s very pleased. Nothing but Kilauea on every channel. | 1.3609 | 0.05373 | 133 | 95 | 28 | 10 |
1084 | He said to watch closely. The devil is in the details | 1.3609 | 0.05156 | 133 | 93 | 32 | 8 |
1085 | We're spillover in Hades2. The 1% are getting actual fire and brimstone. | 1.3609 | 0.04930 | 133 | 91 | 36 | 6 |
1086 | It's in SD -- slow damnation. | 1.3609 | 0.05156 | 133 | 93 | 32 | 8 |
1087 | Fake News. Let’s go to the beach. | 1.3609 | 0.05045 | 133 | 92 | 34 | 7 |
1088 | And if we sign up today, we get one free week at any Trump property worldwide. | 1.3609 | 0.05266 | 133 | 94 | 30 | 9 |
1089 | I wish I'd never invented reality TV. | 1.3609 | 0.05581 | 133 | 97 | 24 | 12 |
1090 | According to the weather report, it will be hot like hell for the foreseeable future. | 1.3609 | 0.05373 | 133 | 95 | 28 | 10 |
1091 | I expected Fox News. | 1.3609 | 0.05682 | 133 | 98 | 22 | 13 |
1092 | What time does Hannity start? | 1.3609 | 0.05266 | 133 | 94 | 30 | 9 |
1093 | Welcome to hell, where your only news source for all eternity is Fox News! Muahahaha! | 1.3609 | 0.05682 | 133 | 98 | 22 | 13 |
1094 | That’s right, no flatscreens for you sinners. | 1.3609 | 0.05156 | 133 | 93 | 32 | 8 |
1095 | I usually skip orientation. | 1.3609 | 0.05478 | 133 | 96 | 26 | 11 |
1096 | No remote, no hi-def , no flat screen : I’m starting to get it. | 1.3609 | 0.05581 | 133 | 97 | 24 | 12 |
1097 | No cable, no flat screen ... this is hell. | 1.3609 | 0.05682 | 133 | 98 | 22 | 13 |
1098 | The whole fire and brimstone thing loses its effect when you are watching the live feed here in the overflow room | 1.3609 | 0.05373 | 133 | 95 | 28 | 10 |
1099 | I can't believe this show got picked up for a 74,853th season. | 1.3609 | 0.05581 | 133 | 97 | 24 | 12 |
1100 | It's the sequel to Liar Liar. It's called Pants on Fire. | 1.3609 | 0.05478 | 133 | 96 | 26 | 11 |
1101 | After age 40, nudity is hell. | 1.3609 | 0.05581 | 133 | 97 | 24 | 12 |
1102 | They say it's just a preview of what's to come. | 1.3609 | 0.05373 | 133 | 95 | 28 | 10 |
1103 | The only problem is, it’s either this, Fox News, or the Home Shopping Network.” | 1.3609 | 0.05682 | 133 | 98 | 22 | 13 |
1104 | Wow, Great to see you here. | 1.3609 | 0.04930 | 133 | 91 | 36 | 6 |
1105 | Sure, it’s not bad so far but I think this is just the orientation video | 1.3609 | 0.05156 | 133 | 93 | 32 | 8 |
1106 | It could be worse, it could be reality T.V. | 1.3603 | 0.04970 | 136 | 94 | 35 | 7 |
1107 | I knew it wasn't going to be plush, but seriously, no cable? | 1.3603 | 0.05078 | 136 | 95 | 33 | 8 |
1108 | The good news is you can watch as much TV as you want... | 1.3603 | 0.04745 | 136 | 92 | 39 | 5 |
1109 | Apparently the energy costs were just killing them. | 1.3603 | 0.05390 | 136 | 98 | 27 | 11 |
1110 | 20 minutes of previews and it already seems like an eternity. | 1.3603 | 0.05288 | 136 | 97 | 29 | 10 |
1111 | Wait. Fox News comes on next. | 1.3603 | 0.05288 | 136 | 97 | 29 | 10 |
1112 | Due to recent budget constraints, we will only be offering simulated hellfire for the next quarter. | 1.3603 | 0.05078 | 136 | 95 | 33 | 8 |
1113 | Wow... It feels so real. | 1.3603 | 0.05390 | 136 | 98 | 27 | 11 |
1114 | "You said you'd only see me again when Hell freezes over". | 1.3603 | 0.05390 | 136 | 98 | 27 | 11 |
1115 | 24/7 reality TV?! This is going to be hell alright. | 1.3603 | 0.05490 | 136 | 99 | 25 | 12 |
1116 | I still think things would have turned out worse if Hillary had won. | 1.3588 | 0.05843 | 131 | 98 | 19 | 14 |
1117 | Last year we had a flat screen LED. Everything’s just going to hell. | 1.3588 | 0.05091 | 131 | 91 | 33 | 7 |
1118 | No flatscreen TV? Well, this is hell. | 1.3588 | 0.05426 | 131 | 94 | 27 | 10 |
1119 | Gosh, GOP really DOES have 'a Special Place in Hell'! | 1.3588 | 0.05942 | 131 | 99 | 17 | 15 |
1120 | At least we're not watching golf. | 1.3588 | 0.05426 | 131 | 94 | 27 | 10 |
1121 | Never thought I’d spend eternity reliving the 60’s. | 1.3588 | 0.05317 | 131 | 93 | 29 | 9 |
1122 | I know it feels fine, but Fox News says it's scorching hot down here, so it must be true. | 1.3588 | 0.05426 | 131 | 94 | 27 | 10 |
1123 | Hi, what's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this ? | 1.3588 | 0.05638 | 131 | 96 | 23 | 12 |
1124 | Did you remember to turn off the stove? | 1.3588 | 0.05091 | 131 | 91 | 33 | 7 |
1125 | You know, the camera adds a few degrees. | 1.3588 | 0.04855 | 131 | 89 | 37 | 5 |
1126 | We’re being forced to watch ‘Apprentice’ reruns for all eternity. | 1.3588 | 0.05205 | 131 | 92 | 31 | 8 |
1127 | It’s still better than ‘Keeping Up With The Karashians’. | 1.3588 | 0.05426 | 131 | 94 | 27 | 10 |
1128 | Trailers these days always seem to give away the ending. | 1.3588 | 0.05317 | 131 | 93 | 29 | 9 |
1129 | The first person to complain about not having cable reincarnates as White House Press Secretary. | 1.3588 | 0.05741 | 131 | 97 | 21 | 13 |
1130 | At least it's less of a disaster than the White House. | 1.3588 | 0.05426 | 131 | 94 | 27 | 10 |
1131 | In purgatory, they're still waiting for the cable guy. | 1.3588 | 0.05533 | 131 | 95 | 25 | 11 |
1132 | Every time I see this show, it's always the same episode. It's like being in Limbo or something. | 1.3588 | 0.05843 | 131 | 98 | 19 | 14 |
1133 | At least it's not the Big Bang Theory again... | 1.3588 | 0.05205 | 131 | 92 | 31 | 8 |
1134 | For these folks, hell is the endless reoccurring epiphany of discovering that Fox News is actually broadcast from hell. | 1.3588 | 0.05533 | 131 | 95 | 25 | 11 |
1135 | What are you doing after orientation? | 1.3588 | 0.04974 | 131 | 90 | 35 | 6 |
1136 | The ad said “Hot Weather- Great Reception” so who knew ? | 1.3588 | 0.05533 | 131 | 95 | 25 | 11 |
1137 | So, got any plans after the show? | 1.3588 | 0.04974 | 131 | 90 | 35 | 6 |
1138 | Fire and brimstone on a large screen would be bad enough, but having to watch it for eternity on that thing is really hell! | 1.3588 | 0.05205 | 131 | 92 | 31 | 8 |
1139 | Orientation videos are the worst, right? | 1.3588 | 0.05317 | 131 | 93 | 29 | 9 |
1140 | The eternal fire was just too expensive. | 1.3588 | 0.05533 | 131 | 95 | 25 | 11 |
1141 | Let's find a cool place to make out after this video is over. | 1.3588 | 0.05426 | 131 | 94 | 27 | 10 |
1142 | If I knew there was no HBO, I would have been a lot nicer up there. | 1.3582 | 0.04785 | 134 | 91 | 38 | 5 |
1143 | Must be election season again. | 1.3582 | 0.05545 | 134 | 98 | 24 | 12 |
1144 | You come here often? | 1.3561 | 0.05392 | 132 | 95 | 27 | 10 |
1145 | Thank Satan they finally turned off the Royal Wedding! | 1.3538 | 0.05445 | 130 | 94 | 26 | 10 |
1146 | Somehow, I expected it would be "live." | 1.3538 | 0.05764 | 130 | 97 | 20 | 13 |
1147 | There is only one station and it's Hell. | 1.3538 | 0.05554 | 130 | 95 | 24 | 11 |
1148 | It could be worse - we could be watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians. | 1.3538 | 0.05222 | 130 | 92 | 30 | 8 |
1149 | I’ve seen this one before. But then I have been here for two hundred years. | 1.3538 | 0.04988 | 130 | 90 | 34 | 6 |
1150 | You just knew it would be reality tv. | 1.3538 | 0.05554 | 130 | 95 | 24 | 11 |
1151 | In the next scene hell freezes over. | 1.3538 | 0.04988 | 130 | 90 | 34 | 6 |
1152 | Let’s start screaming in agony—we don’t want them catching on that we’re really just fine without HDTV. | 1.3538 | 0.05335 | 130 | 93 | 28 | 9 |
1153 | He said ‘to hell with cable !’ | 1.3538 | 0.05222 | 130 | 92 | 30 | 8 |
1154 | Oh hell, Rabbit Ears, really? | 1.3538 | 0.05445 | 130 | 94 | 26 | 10 |
1155 | Well what did you expect, HBO? | 1.3538 | 0.05554 | 130 | 95 | 24 | 11 |
1156 | It's a state-run network. | 1.3538 | 0.05554 | 130 | 95 | 24 | 11 |
1157 | What's worse is still having to pay for all those other channels... | 1.3538 | 0.05554 | 130 | 95 | 24 | 11 |
1158 | So, is this your first time visiting Florida? | 1.3538 | 0.05554 | 130 | 95 | 24 | 11 |
1159 | Could be worse. On the level below us all they get is C-SPAN. | 1.3538 | 0.05335 | 130 | 93 | 28 | 9 |
1160 | No Netflix? This is going to be hell. | 1.3538 | 0.05660 | 130 | 96 | 22 | 12 |
1161 | 'He likes to begin with a short travelogue.' | 1.3538 | 0.05445 | 130 | 94 | 26 | 10 |
1162 | Good thing we died and got out of America just in time. | 1.3538 | 0.05660 | 130 | 96 | 22 | 12 |
1163 | White Supremacist Convention. | 1.3538 | 0.05968 | 130 | 99 | 16 | 15 |
1164 | And he only lets us watch the Weather Channel. | 1.3538 | 0.05335 | 130 | 93 | 28 | 9 |
1165 | I thought hellfire would be bad, but it's the endless safety videos that really get you. | 1.3538 | 0.05222 | 130 | 92 | 30 | 8 |
1166 | I guess he's really going to make us watch the royal wedding from beginning to end. | 1.3538 | 0.05660 | 130 | 96 | 22 | 12 |
1167 | These welcome to newcomers videos are so lame. | 1.3538 | 0.05222 | 130 | 92 | 30 | 8 |
1168 | Somehow, this is even worse. | 1.3538 | 0.05554 | 130 | 95 | 24 | 11 |
1169 | I'm not really interested in a timeshare. I just wanted the free trip. | 1.3538 | 0.05660 | 130 | 96 | 22 | 12 |
1170 | This is the easy part. The live Trump rally coverage airs in five minutes. | 1.3538 | 0.05445 | 130 | 94 | 26 | 10 |
1171 | Somehow I'm not surprised that the only channel we get here is reality T.V. | 1.3538 | 0.05335 | 130 | 93 | 28 | 9 |
1172 | Finally! True news. Who thought we'd get it here? | 1.3538 | 0.05445 | 130 | 94 | 26 | 10 |
1173 | Waiting for Hannity. | 1.3538 | 0.05222 | 130 | 92 | 30 | 8 |
1174 | I thought Hell would be to watch the Kardashians over and over again | 1.3538 | 0.05660 | 130 | 96 | 22 | 12 |
1175 | When do you think people will catch on that they are watching 'fake hell'. | 1.3538 | 0.05335 | 130 | 93 | 28 | 9 |
1176 | Is this your first Burning Man vacation tour? | 1.3538 | 0.05335 | 130 | 93 | 28 | 9 |
1177 | Which season are we on? | 1.3538 | 0.05335 | 130 | 93 | 28 | 9 |
1178 | It's either this or C-SPAN. | 1.3538 | 0.05445 | 130 | 94 | 26 | 10 |
1179 | Could've been worse, Florence. I mean, at least it's not Fox News. | 1.3538 | 0.05445 | 130 | 94 | 26 | 10 |
1180 | Should I ask to use his trident to see if we can pick up a few more channels? | 1.3538 | 0.05222 | 130 | 92 | 30 | 8 |
1181 | Not even a flatscreen TV. We really are in hell. | 1.3538 | 0.05445 | 130 | 94 | 26 | 10 |
1182 | Looks like another scorcher to day. | 1.3538 | 0.05222 | 130 | 92 | 30 | 8 |
1183 | You can't trust everything you see on TV anymore... I heard hell froze over last year. | 1.3538 | 0.05335 | 130 | 93 | 28 | 9 |
1184 | Don't complain or he will switch it to coverage of Trump. | 1.3538 | 0.05660 | 130 | 96 | 22 | 12 |
1185 | Well, no worries about our clothes catching fire! | 1.3538 | 0.05660 | 130 | 96 | 22 | 12 |
1186 | I hear the seventh circle has high-def. | 1.3534 | 0.05358 | 133 | 96 | 27 | 10 |
1187 | The sub always makes us watch a video of our damnation. It's just lazy tormenting. | 1.3516 | 0.05826 | 128 | 96 | 19 | 13 |
1188 | Hell is freezing over. What did you expect? | 1.3516 | 0.05033 | 128 | 89 | 33 | 6 |
1189 | What in hell is that supposed to mean? | 1.3516 | 0.05611 | 128 | 94 | 23 | 11 |
1190 | It's better than looking at Facebook all day... | 1.3516 | 0.05611 | 128 | 94 | 23 | 11 |
1191 | I so hate orientation videos. | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
1192 | Can you believe it over 500 channels and that's all the hell that's on. | 1.3516 | 0.05387 | 128 | 92 | 27 | 9 |
1193 | It's worse than I thought. No cable. | 1.3516 | 0.05387 | 128 | 92 | 27 | 9 |
1194 | I’m surprised they get any reception down here. | 1.3516 | 0.05387 | 128 | 92 | 27 | 9 |
1195 | I just heard it's going to be replaced by Hannity's show. | 1.3516 | 0.05826 | 128 | 96 | 19 | 13 |
1196 | I bet Heaven has HD. | 1.3516 | 0.05500 | 128 | 93 | 25 | 10 |
1197 | On the next level down they have Facebook. | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1198 | Hey, at least it isn't Fox News. | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
1199 | At least it’s better than the room where you spend eternity waiting for the cable technician. | 1.3516 | 0.05387 | 128 | 92 | 27 | 9 |
1200 | It's hell all right--no A.C. and you only get one channel. | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1201 | Remember back when there was more than one channel? | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
1202 | Guess it's not really a surprise that Satan has Comcast. | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1203 | Where’s the remote? | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1204 | Winter is not coming. | 1.3516 | 0.05720 | 128 | 95 | 21 | 12 |
1205 | Could be worse. Remember the Yule log? | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
1206 | If you think this is bad, you should have seen last year's pledge drive. | 1.3516 | 0.05387 | 128 | 92 | 27 | 9 |
1207 | You know, I hear in Heaven they got 200 more channels than we do. | 1.3516 | 0.05500 | 128 | 93 | 25 | 10 |
1208 | Wow, they get great reception down here. | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
1209 | Look around, this special place in Hell is for the White House press corps. | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1210 | Not watching in high definition is the first eternal torment. | 1.3516 | 0.05387 | 128 | 92 | 27 | 9 |
1211 | Before the budget cuts, they at least used actual fire. | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
1212 | If they really wanted to punish us, they would've put on cable news. | 1.3516 | 0.05033 | 128 | 89 | 33 | 6 |
1213 | Apparently, Keeping Up With the Kardashians was considered inhumane. | 1.3516 | 0.05387 | 128 | 92 | 27 | 9 |
1214 | And I thought watching the yule log channel at Christmas on my big screen was hell.... | 1.3516 | 0.05720 | 128 | 95 | 21 | 12 |
1215 | What’s a women like you doing in a place like this? | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
1216 | I should have done more sins | 1.3516 | 0.05611 | 128 | 94 | 23 | 11 |
1217 | I love our mandatory Fox News breaks. | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
1218 | 666 channels and there's still never anything good on. | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1219 | I dare you to start caroling. | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1220 | I was a producer for reality TV. How about you? | 1.3516 | 0.05500 | 128 | 93 | 25 | 10 |
1221 | I just *knew* The Inferno was fake news. | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1222 | He told me no judicial experience was necessary for the appointment....you too? | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1223 | Hmmm, never mind the TV; I always thought he'd be bigger, you know, down there. | 1.3516 | 0.05387 | 128 | 92 | 27 | 9 |
1224 | Watching television via antennae? Even hell doesn't force us to use Comcast. | 1.3516 | 0.05500 | 128 | 93 | 25 | 10 |
1225 | American education IS dead, if he needs a video to explain who he is. | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
1226 | Analog TV, local channels only and no remote, now this is Hell! | 1.3516 | 0.05611 | 128 | 94 | 23 | 11 |
1227 | Alright kids, Mr. Lucifer has jury duty, so we'll be watching a movie today. | 1.3516 | 0.05387 | 128 | 92 | 27 | 9 |
1228 | The orientation video doesn't do it justice. | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1229 | Cathode ray and rabbit ears - this place is worse than I'd thought. | 1.3516 | 0.05033 | 128 | 89 | 33 | 6 |
1230 | This is the most interesting orientation I've been to. Mostly because of the nudity. | 1.3516 | 0.05154 | 128 | 90 | 31 | 7 |
1231 | Season 4,643,342 was better | 1.3516 | 0.05272 | 128 | 91 | 29 | 8 |
1232 | Everyday, it's either this or Fox News. | 1.3511 | 0.05928 | 131 | 100 | 16 | 15 |
1233 | The fire is fake, but the cattle prod is real. | 1.3492 | 0.05323 | 126 | 90 | 28 | 8 |
1234 | Everything looks worse in black and white. | 1.3492 | 0.05441 | 126 | 91 | 26 | 9 |
1235 | It's a very short orientation video | 1.3492 | 0.05557 | 126 | 92 | 24 | 10 |
1236 | At least it’s not Fox...! | 1.3488 | 0.05574 | 129 | 95 | 23 | 11 |
1237 | Oh, hell. I hear the Infernomercial takes forever. | 1.3468 | 0.05497 | 124 | 90 | 25 | 9 |
1238 | Joke’s on him. I love reality TV. | 1.3468 | 0.05253 | 124 | 88 | 29 | 7 |
1239 | There's just no escaping workplace safety videos. | 1.3468 | 0.05497 | 124 | 90 | 25 | 9 |
1240 | I'm telling you, it's got to be just a bad dream, the devil has a bellybutton. | 1.3468 | 0.05377 | 124 | 89 | 27 | 8 |
1241 | Fox News 24/7. This is Hell! | 1.3468 | 0.05731 | 124 | 92 | 21 | 11 |
1242 | An old black and white tube set with built in rabbit ears and one channel...yup...we’re in Hell. | 1.3468 | 0.05615 | 124 | 91 | 23 | 10 |
1243 | I would have thought for sure they'd have Fox News here. | 1.3468 | 0.05731 | 124 | 92 | 21 | 11 |
1244 | Like everything else, hell isn't what it used to be. | 1.3468 | 0.05127 | 124 | 87 | 31 | 6 |
1245 | We never had TV until Trump arrived. | 1.3468 | 0.05497 | 124 | 90 | 25 | 9 |
1246 | Things changed after Comcast bought them out. | 1.3468 | 0.05377 | 124 | 89 | 27 | 8 |
1247 | You think the commercials are bad? Wait 'til 'One Million Years of Fox and Friends" comes on! | 1.3468 | 0.05731 | 124 | 92 | 21 | 11 |
1248 | An eternity of terrible reception. | 1.3468 | 0.05377 | 124 | 89 | 27 | 8 |
1249 | Thanks God it's not The Bachelor. | 1.3468 | 0.05377 | 124 | 89 | 27 | 8 |
1250 | I think this is a rerun. | 1.3468 | 0.05253 | 124 | 88 | 29 | 7 |
1251 | It's not the reception I was expecting. | 1.3468 | 0.04997 | 124 | 86 | 33 | 5 |
1252 | If I knew this is what they meant by burning in hell, I would've committed more crimes. | 1.3468 | 0.05253 | 124 | 88 | 29 | 7 |
1253 | So, hell is the Yule log for eternity. | 1.3468 | 0.05731 | 124 | 92 | 21 | 11 |
1254 | Still beats Comcast. | 1.3468 | 0.05253 | 124 | 88 | 29 | 7 |
1255 | He's seriously reducing the carbon footprint of this place | 1.3468 | 0.05731 | 124 | 92 | 21 | 11 |
1256 | Actually, its better than most of the network shows last season. | 1.3468 | 0.05377 | 124 | 89 | 27 | 8 |
1257 | It's the only show we get here and it was just renewed for an eternity of seasons. | 1.3468 | 0.05615 | 124 | 91 | 23 | 10 |
1258 | 24/7 Fox News | 1.3468 | 0.05615 | 124 | 91 | 23 | 10 |
1259 | It's just the previews. | 1.3468 | 0.05253 | 124 | 88 | 29 | 7 |
1260 | No High Def. Told you this was Hell. | 1.3468 | 0.05253 | 124 | 88 | 29 | 7 |
1261 | You would think the King of Darkness could afford satellite. | 1.3468 | 0.05377 | 124 | 89 | 27 | 8 |
1262 | At least it's not "The View." | 1.3468 | 0.05615 | 124 | 91 | 23 | 10 |
1263 | Do you ever wish for clothes captioning? | 1.3468 | 0.05253 | 124 | 88 | 29 | 7 |
1264 | Yeah, maybe we shouldn’t have voted yes for net neutrality. | 1.3468 | 0.05497 | 124 | 90 | 25 | 9 |
1265 | All the shows are sindicated. | 1.3468 | 0.05615 | 124 | 91 | 23 | 10 |
1266 | No cable, one channel, this must be Hell. | 1.3468 | 0.05377 | 124 | 89 | 27 | 8 |
1267 | Last episode, Sisyphus was voted off. | 1.3468 | 0.05615 | 124 | 91 | 23 | 10 |
1268 | Is this because I told my cable company to go to hell? | 1.3468 | 0.05377 | 124 | 89 | 27 | 8 |
1269 | What's with the rabbit ears? I'd swear my cable bundle included hell in the package. | 1.3468 | 0.05731 | 124 | 92 | 21 | 11 |
1270 | I see what you mean by 'cult classic.' | 1.3468 | 0.05497 | 124 | 90 | 25 | 9 |
1271 | This must be hell - there’s no remote. | 1.3468 | 0.05497 | 124 | 90 | 25 | 9 |
1272 | Normally we watch dumpster fires, but this white house press briefing is pretty hot | 1.3468 | 0.05497 | 124 | 90 | 25 | 9 |
1273 | At least it isn't a bunch of stupid cat videos. | 1.3468 | 0.05127 | 124 | 87 | 31 | 6 |
1274 | I love this part! | 1.3468 | 0.05731 | 124 | 92 | 21 | 11 |
1275 | Hey, I've already seen this 10000 times! | 1.3468 | 0.05497 | 124 | 90 | 25 | 9 |
1276 | We hope this brief training video has been helpful. And now, on behalf of Satan -- Welcome to Hell! | 1.3468 | 0.05253 | 124 | 88 | 29 | 7 |
1277 | This is the first time I've felt lucky to be in the overflow room. | 1.3468 | 0.05497 | 124 | 90 | 25 | 9 |
1278 | So, someone put on Fox News and lost the remote. And now we're here. | 1.3465 | 0.05169 | 127 | 90 | 30 | 7 |
1279 | Nice rack. | 1.3443 | 0.06022 | 122 | 93 | 16 | 13 |
1280 | This is a rerun. They think of everything. | 1.3443 | 0.05431 | 122 | 88 | 26 | 8 |
1281 | Lacks the warmth of the original. | 1.3443 | 0.05675 | 122 | 90 | 22 | 10 |
1282 | You'd think the Ruler of the Underworld would have a flat-screen. | 1.3443 | 0.05431 | 122 | 88 | 26 | 8 |
1283 | Don't worry.They change the channel every thousand years or so. | 1.3443 | 0.05305 | 122 | 87 | 28 | 7 |
1284 | Yep. We just wait for the cable guy. | 1.3443 | 0.05675 | 122 | 90 | 22 | 10 |
1285 | HR says we can't use real fire anymore. | 1.3443 | 0.05554 | 122 | 89 | 24 | 9 |
1286 | It's sweeps week for the Dante Channel. | 1.3443 | 0.05675 | 122 | 90 | 22 | 10 |
1287 | 60” flat screen back at my place. You want to get outta here? | 1.3443 | 0.05431 | 122 | 88 | 26 | 8 |
1288 | Two thousand channels, and nothing's on. | 1.3443 | 0.05909 | 122 | 92 | 18 | 12 |
1289 | What the Hell? | 1.3443 | 0.05305 | 122 | 87 | 28 | 7 |
1290 | I expected a more immersive experience from this evangelical theme park. | 1.3443 | 0.05431 | 122 | 88 | 26 | 8 |
1291 | They finally put it down here where it belongs. | 1.3443 | 0.05175 | 122 | 86 | 30 | 6 |
1292 | Frankly, I'm underwhelmed by the orientation so far. | 1.3443 | 0.05431 | 122 | 88 | 26 | 8 |
1293 | Using real fire was killing our budget. | 1.3443 | 0.05554 | 122 | 89 | 24 | 9 |
1294 | I think they just want us to get warmed up. | 1.3443 | 0.05305 | 122 | 87 | 28 | 7 |
1295 | It’s hell trying to get a signal down here | 1.3443 | 0.05175 | 122 | 86 | 30 | 6 |
1296 | Watching Having to watch the Yuletide Log burn forever is bad enough. But the perpetual Christmas music is sheer hell. | 1.3443 | 0.05793 | 122 | 91 | 20 | 11 |
1297 | No commercials, that’s a positive... | 1.3443 | 0.05554 | 122 | 89 | 24 | 9 |
1298 | I refuse to believe we’re in hell until they change the channel to Dr. Phil. | 1.3443 | 0.05793 | 122 | 91 | 20 | 11 |
1299 | I think it’s the Weather Channel... | 1.3443 | 0.05675 | 122 | 90 | 22 | 10 |
1300 | It could be worse. In heaven they have to watch reruns of "Touched by an Angel". | 1.3443 | 0.05793 | 122 | 91 | 20 | 11 |
1301 | In hell, you still have to get up to adjust the antenna. | 1.3443 | 0.05043 | 122 | 85 | 32 | 5 |
1302 | We used to get HBO, but this place has really gone to, well, you know. | 1.3443 | 0.05675 | 122 | 90 | 22 | 10 |
1303 | I knew hell would be awful, but I never dreamed that we would have to watch reality TV for eternity. | 1.3443 | 0.05554 | 122 | 89 | 24 | 9 |
1304 | First Fake News...Now Fake Flames. | 1.3443 | 0.06022 | 122 | 93 | 16 | 13 |
1305 | It's either this or brimstone. | 1.3443 | 0.05043 | 122 | 85 | 32 | 5 |
1306 | This is the hottest show on tv. | 1.3443 | 0.05175 | 122 | 86 | 30 | 6 |
1307 | Look on the bright side, they could have streamed Fox News. | 1.3443 | 0.05909 | 122 | 92 | 18 | 12 |
1308 | I heard that in the First Circle, they get to watch something other than Fox News. | 1.3443 | 0.05431 | 122 | 88 | 26 | 8 |
1309 | Could be worse. | 1.3443 | 0.05043 | 122 | 85 | 32 | 5 |
1310 | It's part of a new carbon neutral initiative. | 1.3443 | 0.05793 | 122 | 91 | 20 | 11 |
1311 | Great- another local interest story. | 1.3443 | 0.05305 | 122 | 87 | 28 | 7 |
1312 | This is virtual Hell! | 1.3443 | 0.05675 | 122 | 90 | 22 | 10 |
1313 | 7,500 degrees again today? And you believe Dopler Radar? | 1.3417 | 0.05358 | 120 | 86 | 27 | 7 |
1314 | So far, I've only abandoned all hope that we'll get to watch the playoffs. | 1.3417 | 0.05358 | 120 | 86 | 27 | 7 |
1315 | On the bright side it looks like they have their own cable news channel. | 1.3417 | 0.05090 | 120 | 84 | 31 | 5 |
1316 | Is there a remote chance in Hell of getting a better reception? | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1317 | It's a warm-up video. | 1.3417 | 0.05358 | 120 | 86 | 27 | 7 |
1318 | Only one screen for all of us and no cable?! What kind of place is this?! | 1.3417 | 0.05487 | 120 | 87 | 25 | 8 |
1319 | Right as the couple announces which house they'll choose he switches to this channel. | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1320 | That's the live stream from 666 Fifth Avenue. | 1.3417 | 0.06092 | 120 | 92 | 15 | 13 |
1321 | It’s either this or the Kardashians. | 1.3417 | 0.05487 | 120 | 87 | 25 | 8 |
1322 | Get used to it, there's only one channel down here. | 1.3417 | 0.05090 | 120 | 84 | 31 | 5 |
1323 | I've got a corner suite down in the 4th circle with two pals from Wharton. You have any plans for later? | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1324 | Orientation is always Hell. | 1.3417 | 0.05857 | 120 | 90 | 19 | 11 |
1325 | I'm so relieved! I always thought it was going to be Fox News. | 1.3417 | 0.05857 | 120 | 90 | 19 | 11 |
1326 | He’s making us watch his home videos again. | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1327 | It's not the heat I miss so much, it's the humidity. | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1328 | Who knew there would be hell to pay for cutting the cable.? | 1.3417 | 0.05225 | 120 | 85 | 29 | 6 |
1329 | Would a fake log be too much to ask? | 1.3417 | 0.05487 | 120 | 87 | 25 | 8 |
1330 | Trust me this is much better than when we just had radio. | 1.3417 | 0.04950 | 120 | 83 | 33 | 4 |
1331 | I guess oil prices are effecting everyone | 1.3417 | 0.05487 | 120 | 87 | 25 | 8 |
1332 | Next level down, it's Here Comes Honey Boo Boo in VR. | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1333 | My parents had that TV in the '80s... it was torture to watch then too. | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1334 | Oh No, just the FOX NEWS Channel down here! | 1.3417 | 0.05976 | 120 | 91 | 17 | 12 |
1335 | It's a touch ironic since I never believed in literal fire and brimstone. | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1336 | Get used to it kids... Still think global warming is a myth? | 1.3417 | 0.05736 | 120 | 89 | 21 | 10 |
1337 | This is much more pleasant than the focus group on torture. | 1.3417 | 0.05090 | 120 | 84 | 31 | 5 |
1338 | At least it's not C-Span. | 1.3417 | 0.05487 | 120 | 87 | 25 | 8 |
1339 | A box tv? This really is Hell. | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1340 | I didn't expect they would have Fox News here. | 1.3417 | 0.05736 | 120 | 89 | 21 | 10 |
1341 | I’m surprised they get reception down here. | 1.3417 | 0.05487 | 120 | 87 | 25 | 8 |
1342 | Orientation videos are always the worst. | 1.3417 | 0.05487 | 120 | 87 | 25 | 8 |
1343 | Glad we’re in the overflow room. | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1344 | Honestly, I prefer it to watching Fox News. | 1.3417 | 0.05857 | 120 | 90 | 19 | 11 |
1345 | At least it's not snow. | 1.3417 | 0.05613 | 120 | 88 | 23 | 9 |
1346 | Is it me, or does this episode seem to be lasting forever? | 1.3417 | 0.05976 | 120 | 91 | 17 | 12 |
1347 | Let me guess. Hot as Hell with a chance of Fire & Brimstone. Surprise, surprise. | 1.3415 | 0.05636 | 123 | 91 | 22 | 10 |
1348 | At least there are no commercials. | 1.3415 | 0.05516 | 123 | 90 | 24 | 9 |
1349 | In heaven it's clouds and a flat-screen. | 1.3415 | 0.05516 | 123 | 90 | 24 | 9 |
1350 | This is the floor for Everyone Who Ever Made Fun Of The Yule Log. If you're looking for Taking Forever To Order At Starbucks, that's on six. | 1.3415 | 0.05867 | 123 | 93 | 18 | 12 |
1351 | No streaming? This IS Hell. | 1.3394 | 0.06004 | 109 | 81 | 19 | 9 |
1352 | Down here we call it "singe-watching." | 1.3390 | 0.05412 | 118 | 85 | 26 | 7 |
1353 | I thought at least we would be able to wear our "Make America Great Again" hats. | 1.3390 | 0.05674 | 118 | 87 | 22 | 9 |
1354 | I liked Season 1 better. | 1.3390 | 0.05674 | 118 | 87 | 22 | 9 |
1355 | This is one hell of an orientation video. | 1.3390 | 0.05544 | 118 | 86 | 24 | 8 |
1356 | Hey, so... do you come here often? | 1.3390 | 0.05277 | 118 | 84 | 28 | 6 |
1357 | It's almost like they named it Tinder as a warning. | 1.3390 | 0.05674 | 118 | 87 | 22 | 9 |
1358 | It's a slight improvement from Fox & Friends. | 1.3390 | 0.05674 | 118 | 87 | 22 | 9 |
1359 | No Netflix?!? Christ, this IS Hell! | 1.3390 | 0.05544 | 118 | 86 | 24 | 8 |
1360 | Oh we could change it - we just can’t find the remote. | 1.3390 | 0.05412 | 118 | 85 | 26 | 7 |
1361 | The budget cuts must've hit his department the hardest | 1.3390 | 0.05138 | 118 | 83 | 30 | 5 |
1362 | Well, at least it's a dry heat. | 1.3390 | 0.05800 | 118 | 88 | 20 | 10 |
1363 | These instructional videos are always so dated. | 1.3390 | 0.05544 | 118 | 86 | 24 | 8 |
1364 | I’m just going to stay up until they give the forecast for the weekend... | 1.3390 | 0.05674 | 118 | 87 | 22 | 9 |
1365 | Somehow I suspect it’s not going to be quite the same kind of ‘fireside chat’ our grandparents got from President Roosevelt. | 1.3390 | 0.05544 | 118 | 86 | 24 | 8 |
1366 | Don't worry - TV cameras add like 10 degrees. | 1.3390 | 0.05544 | 118 | 86 | 24 | 8 |
1367 | I used to think reality TV was torture. | 1.3390 | 0.05412 | 118 | 85 | 26 | 7 |
1368 | Did you read the book? | 1.3390 | 0.05674 | 118 | 87 | 22 | 9 |
1369 | Ironic don't you think--all this is heaven for an arsonist. | 1.3390 | 0.05800 | 118 | 88 | 20 | 10 |
1370 | I recognize that guy from the DMV. | 1.3390 | 0.05674 | 118 | 87 | 22 | 9 |
1371 | Heaven has a big screen with cable. | 1.3390 | 0.05674 | 118 | 87 | 22 | 9 |
1372 | Glad I'm down here and not a White House staffer! | 1.3390 | 0.05544 | 118 | 86 | 24 | 8 |
1373 | Somehow the heat is lost in the translation! | 1.3390 | 0.06044 | 118 | 90 | 16 | 12 |
1374 | Sure, it'll get picked up for next season. It always gets picked up for next season. | 1.3390 | 0.05544 | 118 | 86 | 24 | 8 |
1375 | Streaming hell is cheaper these days | 1.3388 | 0.05574 | 121 | 89 | 23 | 9 |
1376 | That women in front is pretty hot. | 1.3388 | 0.05574 | 121 | 89 | 23 | 9 |
1377 | Wow, no flat screens. This really is hell. | 1.3388 | 0.05190 | 121 | 86 | 29 | 6 |
1378 | These are just the previews. | 1.3364 | 0.05133 | 107 | 74 | 30 | 3 |
1379 | This must be hell. There’s no cable. | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1380 | It finally froze over. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1381 | And they still need more evidence for global warming!! | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1382 | I won't spoil it for you, but I know how this ends. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1383 | I hear the place upstairs has a real fireplace. | 1.3362 | 0.05468 | 116 | 84 | 25 | 7 |
1384 | I don't think the trailer does it justice. | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1385 | This just means that when I wake up, Hannity will still be raving. | 1.3362 | 0.05865 | 116 | 87 | 19 | 10 |
1386 | We should've thought about this before we started working for Trump. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1387 | I always thought there would be hell to pay for cutting cable. | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1388 | These commercials are hell. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1389 | The circle under this only has radio. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1390 | Figures he would have us watch an intro to hell on an analog tv | 1.3362 | 0.05468 | 116 | 84 | 25 | 7 |
1391 | So this is hell-no cable TV. | 1.3362 | 0.05865 | 116 | 87 | 19 | 10 |
1392 | I've seen this one already. | 1.3362 | 0.05040 | 116 | 81 | 31 | 4 |
1393 | Somehow I thought we'd be wearing Prada. | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1394 | what the hell is this? | 1.3362 | 0.05865 | 116 | 87 | 19 | 10 |
1395 | The medium is the message. | 1.3362 | 0.05468 | 116 | 84 | 25 | 7 |
1396 | Where in the hell is the remote? | 1.3362 | 0.05468 | 116 | 84 | 25 | 7 |
1397 | Same ol' forecast: "Mostly hot with a chance of fire and brimstone." | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1398 | I've always hated reality TV. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1399 | The laugh track is a bit over the top. | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1400 | That's the weather channel. The usual foercast. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1401 | At least it's not cable news. | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1402 | Just a quick one. What are they going to do--punish us? | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1403 | Hell is other white people. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1404 | The “Woman Scorned” symposium was WAY scarier. | 1.3362 | 0.05991 | 116 | 88 | 17 | 11 |
1405 | Hard to tell but it looks like a rerun | 1.3362 | 0.05040 | 116 | 81 | 31 | 4 |
1406 | It gets worse -- at night they run nothing but informercials. | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1407 | "It's a training film for those who never experienced hell on earth". | 1.3362 | 0.05468 | 116 | 84 | 25 | 7 |
1408 | I just watch for the commercials. | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1409 | Which Fox News show did you say you worked on? | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1410 | The seventh circle is currently under construction. Please stand by. | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1411 | Hey, at least it's not Hannity. | 1.3362 | 0.06237 | 116 | 90 | 13 | 13 |
1412 | The picture quality is so lifelike...it's the damnedest thing. | 1.3362 | 0.05468 | 116 | 84 | 25 | 7 |
1413 | Nothing but Fox interrupted only by the Cars for Kids jingle. for eternity. | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1414 | I hear heaven has a big screen with Netflix. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1415 | I was talking to Ed down on Level 3 and he said they get to have real fire. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1416 | ... and then Trump said "You're Fired". | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1417 | We've been praying to find the remote for ages | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1418 | The weather channel again? | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1419 | Nuts! It’s a rerun. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1420 | I heard St. Peter bought a 65 inch 4K Ultra HD for the upstairs rec room | 1.3362 | 0.05468 | 116 | 84 | 25 | 7 |
1421 | The flames look better in HD. | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1422 | The "hell" part is that you can't change the damned channel. | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1423 | I am the Pearly Gates when somebody asked if I'd like to get naked and watch something hot and here I am. What about you? | 1.3362 | 0.05865 | 116 | 87 | 19 | 10 |
1424 | I can't believe they picked this up for another season. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1425 | I knew there'd be infomercials in Hell. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1426 | When I sold my soul for the hottest channels on TV, this isn't what I expected! | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1427 | This is the weirdest Groupon ever. | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1428 | " Fox and Friends " is on in fifteen minutes! | 1.3362 | 0.05468 | 116 | 84 | 25 | 7 |
1429 | Do you have any plans for later? | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1430 | I'm actually relieved-no more pharma commercials. | 1.3362 | 0.05468 | 116 | 84 | 25 | 7 |
1431 | You know, I think it's great the White House is bringing back fireside chats. | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1432 | It's the Trump White House, on an endless loop. It makes me think we're better off here. | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1433 | He is doing what he can to reduce his carbon footprint. | 1.3362 | 0.05865 | 116 | 87 | 19 | 10 |
1434 | ...and I thought Keeping Up with the Kardashians was Hell. | 1.3362 | 0.06237 | 116 | 90 | 13 | 13 |
1435 | They only have this and Fox News | 1.3362 | 0.05991 | 116 | 88 | 17 | 11 |
1436 | ADULTERERS Anonymous ?? Confidential as AA ?? Obviously, NOT !!! | 1.3362 | 0.06356 | 116 | 91 | 11 | 14 |
1437 | Typical news it's all fire and brimstone. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1438 | Don't fret over the remote, the real torment sets in when you realize we only get one channel. | 1.3362 | 0.05468 | 116 | 84 | 25 | 7 |
1439 | It's an EPA thing. | 1.3362 | 0.05187 | 116 | 82 | 29 | 5 |
1440 | there used to be an actual fire but, you know...budget cuts are hell. | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1441 | Like hell, isn't it? | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1442 | The devil is always in the details with these cable packages. | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1443 | It's apparently a live transmission of the opening of the US Embassy in Jerusalem. | 1.3362 | 0.05991 | 116 | 88 | 17 | 11 |
1444 | Really? I got naked for this? | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1445 | They're trying to reduce their carbon footprint. | 1.3362 | 0.05604 | 116 | 85 | 23 | 8 |
1446 | It's the same Trump speech over and over again. | 1.3362 | 0.05736 | 116 | 86 | 21 | 9 |
1447 | Apparently Norwegians in heaven also watch this show for all eternity | 1.3362 | 0.05187 | 116 | 82 | 29 | 5 |
1448 | It’s the only reality TV show they have down here. | 1.3362 | 0.05329 | 116 | 83 | 27 | 6 |
1449 | What the devil is going on? | 1.3361 | 0.05880 | 119 | 90 | 18 | 11 |
1450 | It’s probably more breaking news. | 1.3333 | 0.05237 | 114 | 81 | 28 | 5 |
1451 | Long range forecast, expect no break from the heat and humidity. | 1.3333 | 0.06126 | 102 | 76 | 18 | 8 |
1452 | A CRT with rabbit ears? This is hell. | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1453 | Well, I'll be damned! | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1454 | They add two years to eternity if you switch channels | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1455 | Well that answers the question...an eternity of the Channel 9 Yule Log. | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1456 | No spoilers please. I haven't seen this episode yet. | 1.3333 | 0.05237 | 114 | 81 | 28 | 5 |
1457 | To hell with it! | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1458 | Rabbit ears on black-and-white TV set with only one Channel and no cable ..... we really are in Hell. | 1.3333 | 0.05694 | 117 | 87 | 21 | 9 |
1459 | Hell of a party, isn’t it? | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1460 | In hell there is one community tv with one channel to watch & the devil is the only one who gets the tv remote; in heaven everybody gets their own tv with unlimited cable & a personalized tv remote with your initials engraved on it. | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1461 | It's hell not having cable. | 1.3333 | 0.05800 | 114 | 85 | 20 | 9 |
1462 | Yes! Finally no political commercials. | 1.3333 | 0.06062 | 114 | 87 | 16 | 11 |
1463 | No cable down here. So it's either this or PBS. | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1464 | Turn up the volume, we're freezing here! | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1465 | We're trying to be more fuel efficient. | 1.3333 | 0.06062 | 114 | 87 | 16 | 11 |
1466 | I always figured hell would involve a lot more Hannity. | 1.3333 | 0.05800 | 114 | 85 | 20 | 9 |
1467 | Do you know if this Orientation covers the dress code? | 1.3333 | 0.05429 | 117 | 85 | 25 | 7 |
1468 | THIS is CNN.... | 1.3333 | 0.05800 | 114 | 85 | 20 | 9 |
1469 | That TSA Screener was right! This pre-boarding process is absolute Hell! | 1.3333 | 0.05800 | 114 | 85 | 20 | 9 |
1470 | I've seen this show before, spoiler alert. | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1471 | Eco-friendly, renewable, sustainable - call it what you will; it's freezing down here. | 1.3333 | 0.05383 | 114 | 82 | 26 | 6 |
1472 | I heard everyone in heaven gets an iPad | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1473 | I can't believe that we have to watch this in black and white. | 1.3333 | 0.05383 | 114 | 82 | 26 | 6 |
1474 | Isn't this the same news we heard yesterday? | 1.3333 | 0.04772 | 114 | 78 | 34 | 2 |
1475 | It just hasn't been the same since the budget cuts | 1.3333 | 0.05383 | 114 | 82 | 26 | 6 |
1476 | You think this is hell, wait till he changes the channel to reality TV. | 1.3333 | 0.05800 | 114 | 85 | 20 | 9 |
1477 | The Yule Log isn't so bad; the 24-hour Christmas music is the real torture. | 1.3333 | 0.05932 | 114 | 86 | 18 | 10 |
1478 | Trump's America and hell look pretty similar, don't you think? | 1.3333 | 0.05932 | 114 | 86 | 18 | 10 |
1479 | The remote doesn't work. This is the real torture. | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1480 | Fake Hell ! | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1481 | You'd think we'd at least get to get FOX News down here. | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1482 | Lousy reception,no Hi Def, nowhere to sit , and no AC.This really is HELL. | 1.3333 | 0.05429 | 117 | 85 | 25 | 7 |
1483 | Actual flames are too much of a safety risk. | 1.3333 | 0.05383 | 114 | 82 | 26 | 6 |
1484 | Look at the TV. Rabbit ear antennae, no remote, VHF and UHF dials, no color, and one channel. OMG THIS IS HELL!!! | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1485 | It’s hell without cable. | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1486 | Honestly, I'm just glad they're not making us read a book. | 1.3333 | 0.05800 | 114 | 85 | 20 | 9 |
1487 | It's better for the environment but boring as hell. | 1.3333 | 0.05800 | 114 | 85 | 20 | 9 |
1488 | Twenty-four seven local news coverage. That's the hell of it. | 1.3333 | 0.05383 | 114 | 82 | 26 | 6 |
1489 | Where in the hell is the remote? | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1490 | This is it. One channel. | 1.3333 | 0.05932 | 114 | 86 | 18 | 10 |
1491 | Looks like Fox News has dropped all pretense. | 1.3333 | 0.05694 | 117 | 87 | 21 | 9 |
1492 | So ... which Hollywood executive did you represent? | 1.3333 | 0.05429 | 117 | 85 | 25 | 7 |
1493 | Well, that looks like the hell fire. I wonder if the damnation is also virtual? | 1.3333 | 0.05237 | 114 | 81 | 28 | 5 |
1494 | I'd sell another soul for a flat screen | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1495 | ... but first, a brief "Welcome to Hell" orientation video. | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1496 | As if we didn't already know that hell is basic cable. | 1.3333 | 0.05800 | 114 | 85 | 20 | 9 |
1497 | I heard the next season is a lot darker. | 1.3333 | 0.05291 | 117 | 84 | 27 | 6 |
1498 | This infomercial continues until Hell freezes over. | 1.3333 | 0.06188 | 114 | 88 | 14 | 12 |
1499 | You haven't missed anything, it's just the trailer. | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1500 | I’ve seen it a million times and it still makes me laugh. | 1.3333 | 0.06188 | 114 | 88 | 14 | 12 |
1501 | What the Hell?" "Another political rally" "This is torture! | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1502 | If they show any more Hannity, I may ask to go back to the pit of flame. | 1.3333 | 0.05800 | 114 | 85 | 20 | 9 |
1503 | Anybody seen the remote? | 1.3333 | 0.05822 | 117 | 88 | 19 | 10 |
1504 | And you still get ads, even after you upgrade. | 1.3333 | 0.05932 | 114 | 86 | 18 | 10 |
1505 | It's better than a lot of shows we watched when alive. | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1506 | Don't worry this is just one of those dreams where u appear naked in public | 1.3333 | 0.05237 | 114 | 81 | 28 | 5 |
1507 | I always said adjusting those rabbit ears was hell. | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1508 | The previews are starting. | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1509 | Paying the extra for the virtual hell experience was a good choice... | 1.3333 | 0.05526 | 114 | 83 | 24 | 7 |
1510 | I told you it was worse in DC. | 1.3333 | 0.06062 | 114 | 87 | 16 | 11 |
1511 | You think we adulterers have it bad--the murderers have to watch Full House. | 1.3333 | 0.05664 | 114 | 84 | 22 | 8 |
1512 | It's going to be hell without cable. | 1.3304 | 0.05485 | 115 | 84 | 24 | 7 |
1513 | Summer reruns. | 1.3304 | 0.05888 | 115 | 87 | 18 | 10 |
1514 | So glad Fox News is on down here. | 1.3304 | 0.05888 | 115 | 87 | 18 | 10 |
1515 | It wouldn't be half as bad down here if I hadn't left the remote in my pocket. | 1.3304 | 0.05622 | 115 | 85 | 22 | 8 |
1516 | No cable? This IS hell! | 1.3304 | 0.05622 | 115 | 85 | 22 | 8 |
1517 | The next circle only has dial-up. | 1.3304 | 0.05344 | 115 | 83 | 26 | 6 |
1518 | This is what I call virtual hell. | 1.3304 | 0.05757 | 115 | 86 | 20 | 9 |
1519 | What does it tell you about our president when even the devil is working on reducing is carbon footprint? | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1520 | The book's better. | 1.3304 | 0.05585 | 112 | 82 | 23 | 7 |
1521 | So, Hell is waiting eternity for the cable installer? | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1522 | It was either the weather forecast or Fox & Friends ... the one time he actually gave us what we asked for. | 1.3304 | 0.05866 | 112 | 84 | 19 | 9 |
1523 | The new screensaver for Fox News viewers. | 1.3304 | 0.06001 | 112 | 85 | 17 | 10 |
1524 | Do we get clothes if Hell freezes over? | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1525 | I should have known we'd all have to share the same tv, but seriously, the Weather Channel? | 1.3304 | 0.05585 | 112 | 82 | 23 | 7 |
1526 | Wanna get something to eat before the last circle? | 1.3304 | 0.05439 | 112 | 81 | 25 | 6 |
1527 | Oh, there is no actual ride. We just stand in line forever. | 1.3304 | 0.06134 | 112 | 86 | 15 | 11 |
1528 | C’mon, no cable!?! That’s just inhumane! | 1.3304 | 0.05585 | 112 | 82 | 23 | 7 |
1529 | In ten minutes we get reruns of 'The PTL Club'. Then the real Hell begins. | 1.3304 | 0.05585 | 112 | 82 | 23 | 7 |
1530 | I guess this means we’re in Purgatory. | 1.3304 | 0.06001 | 112 | 85 | 17 | 10 |
1531 | I sold mine for a bitcoin, what'd you sell yours for? | 1.3304 | 0.06134 | 112 | 86 | 15 | 11 |
1532 | An eternity of watching television... this really is hell. | 1.3304 | 0.05135 | 112 | 79 | 29 | 4 |
1533 | When the cable's out we watch the Yule Log... and the cable's always out. | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1534 | I’m skeptical this global warming protest will have any impact. | 1.3304 | 0.05866 | 112 | 84 | 19 | 9 |
1535 | I've seen this one already. | 1.3304 | 0.06001 | 112 | 85 | 17 | 10 |
1536 | It's the yule log from hell. | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1537 | I've heard it gets better after the third season. | 1.3304 | 0.05439 | 112 | 81 | 25 | 6 |
1538 | Count yourself lucky we got purgatory; I hear hell has nothing but 24/7 cable news. | 1.3304 | 0.06001 | 112 | 85 | 17 | 10 |
1539 | Not sure whether this is the reward--or the punishment. | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1540 | There's only one channel, one show, one episode, and it's all repeats. | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1541 | My feet are cold. | 1.3304 | 0.05866 | 112 | 84 | 19 | 9 |
1542 | I've never been to a cable company corporate retreat before. | 1.3304 | 0.05585 | 112 | 82 | 23 | 7 |
1543 | I bet Heaven has HD. | 1.3304 | 0.05585 | 112 | 82 | 23 | 7 |
1544 | Could be worse, I heard the ninth circle only shows the news. | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1545 | Only the worst sinners have to spend eternity without cable. | 1.3304 | 0.05866 | 112 | 84 | 19 | 9 |
1546 | It's not much different than cable news, but the sick part is that you miss the commercials. | 1.3304 | 0.05289 | 112 | 80 | 27 | 5 |
1547 | I'm just here for the free set of golf clubs you get for sitting through the presentation. | 1.3304 | 0.05585 | 112 | 82 | 23 | 7 |
1548 | Welcome to Dante's placebo. | 1.3304 | 0.05439 | 112 | 81 | 25 | 6 |
1549 | I've seen this one before. | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1550 | Want me to tell you how it ends? | 1.3304 | 0.05585 | 112 | 82 | 23 | 7 |
1551 | Apparently, "fire and fury like the world has never seen" plays well down here - it's on every channel. | 1.3304 | 0.05135 | 112 | 79 | 29 | 4 |
1552 | I really thought they'd have cable. | 1.3304 | 0.05866 | 112 | 84 | 19 | 9 |
1553 | I'm not sure about you, but these team building retreats are getting stranger and stranger... | 1.3304 | 0.05439 | 112 | 81 | 25 | 6 |
1554 | This freshmen orientation is making me a bit nervous. | 1.3304 | 0.05439 | 112 | 81 | 25 | 6 |
1555 | Everything is old school down here, but considering where we are the reception is fantastic. | 1.3304 | 0.05585 | 112 | 82 | 23 | 7 |
1556 | It's a perpetual weather channel. | 1.3304 | 0.05135 | 112 | 79 | 29 | 4 |
1557 | It's Trump's State of the Union address. | 1.3304 | 0.06001 | 112 | 85 | 17 | 10 |
1558 | Heaven is a 60” 4K flatscreen. | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1559 | They've really lost their touch lately, but just wait 'till Gina Haspel gets down here. Then we'll see some torture. | 1.3304 | 0.05727 | 112 | 83 | 21 | 8 |
1560 | Welcome to FOX AND FRIENDS! | 1.3304 | 0.06638 | 112 | 90 | 7 | 15 |
1561 | It's a made for TV version of Dante's Inferno. | 1.3304 | 0.05135 | 112 | 79 | 29 | 4 |
1562 | It's eternal reruns of the Yule log. | 1.3304 | 0.06134 | 112 | 86 | 15 | 11 |
1563 | I’m so glad I remembered my glasses. | 1.3304 | 0.05135 | 112 | 79 | 29 | 4 |
1564 | Purgatory was so much more interesting. | 1.3304 | 0.05585 | 112 | 82 | 23 | 7 |
1565 | It picks up after the first season. | 1.3304 | 0.05439 | 112 | 81 | 25 | 6 |
1566 | It's the televangelists again | 1.3304 | 0.05439 | 112 | 81 | 25 | 6 |
1567 | Are you enjoying the reception? | 1.3301 | 0.05234 | 103 | 72 | 28 | 3 |
1568 | Orientation is taking forever. | 1.3274 | 0.05097 | 113 | 80 | 29 | 4 |
1569 | Rabbit ears and a CRT. This really is hell. | 1.3274 | 0.05097 | 113 | 80 | 29 | 4 |
1570 | This is Hell! No remote and rabbit ears! | 1.3274 | 0.05821 | 113 | 85 | 19 | 9 |
1571 | The dammed take a quick break to watch coverage of the Trump administration... | 1.3274 | 0.05821 | 113 | 85 | 19 | 9 |
1572 | This isn't so bad! I thought for orientation you had to sit through some godawful long poem. | 1.3274 | 0.05543 | 113 | 83 | 23 | 7 |
1573 | I never would've guessed that Hell would have a weather channel. | 1.3274 | 0.05684 | 113 | 84 | 21 | 8 |
1574 | Now, where in the hell did I put the remote?! | 1.3273 | 0.05792 | 110 | 82 | 20 | 8 |
1575 | If you want to see the corrupt politicians dunked in boiling tar, you have to subscribe to Netflix. | 1.3273 | 0.05792 | 110 | 82 | 20 | 8 |
1576 | It's actually the power of suggestion that makes it so hot down here. | 1.3273 | 0.05342 | 110 | 79 | 26 | 5 |
1577 | At least we've moved on from fake news to the naked truth! | 1.3273 | 0.05934 | 110 | 83 | 18 | 9 |
1578 | I'm new here. When does the screaming part begin? | 1.3273 | 0.06073 | 110 | 84 | 16 | 10 |
1579 | Of course this is hell ... that's an analog TV! | 1.3273 | 0.06073 | 110 | 84 | 16 | 10 |
1580 | I hate when they show you everything in the previews. | 1.3273 | 0.05646 | 110 | 81 | 22 | 7 |
1581 | Thank God those flames aren't real. | 1.3273 | 0.06073 | 110 | 84 | 16 | 10 |
1582 | Evidently the televangelists were wrong about the Rapture. | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1583 | Wow - no cable, satellite, or streaming; and no remote. We are in Hell! | 1.3273 | 0.06342 | 110 | 86 | 12 | 12 |
1584 | No high definition? This really is Hell. | 1.3273 | 0.05646 | 110 | 81 | 22 | 7 |
1585 | It’s not so much the heat as it is poor picture resolution that gets to you. | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1586 | Hell has been outsourced to Fox News | 1.3273 | 0.06342 | 110 | 86 | 12 | 12 |
1587 | I think I've already seen this episode | 1.3273 | 0.05792 | 110 | 82 | 20 | 8 |
1588 | I guess he followed through on the whole “fire and fury” thing. | 1.3273 | 0.06073 | 110 | 84 | 16 | 10 |
1589 | It's not so bad, it's like the Yule Log, but for the unforgiven. | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1590 | At least it's not the fire place log again. | 1.3273 | 0.05020 | 110 | 77 | 30 | 3 |
1591 | Just reruns again. | 1.3273 | 0.05934 | 110 | 83 | 18 | 9 |
1592 | Every time a flame leaps a devil gets its horns. | 1.3273 | 0.05934 | 110 | 83 | 18 | 9 |
1593 | Man, it feels like we've been watching the same orientation video for 1000 years. | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1594 | There...right after that third crackle...that's where the tape resets. | 1.3273 | 0.05646 | 110 | 81 | 22 | 7 |
1595 | Hey, no spoilers! I'm new here. | 1.3273 | 0.05342 | 110 | 79 | 26 | 5 |
1596 | ...still, it's nice that we're watching all together. | 1.3273 | 0.05342 | 110 | 79 | 26 | 5 |
1597 | This is going to be hell, no internet! | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1598 | The demonic iconography would indicate this is a Catholic image, yet our genitals are angled away from the frame in a sop to Puritanical Protestant sensibilities. Also, why does this devil have a trident rather than the traditional pitchfork? | 1.3273 | 0.05342 | 110 | 79 | 26 | 5 |
1599 | It really makes you appreciate a real fire. | 1.3273 | 0.05184 | 110 | 78 | 28 | 4 |
1600 | They only get Fox News down here. | 1.3273 | 0.05934 | 110 | 83 | 18 | 9 |
1601 | It's the extended forecast on The Weather Channel. | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1602 | The worst part is the poor image quality. | 1.3273 | 0.05646 | 110 | 81 | 22 | 7 |
1603 | It's hell with no cable. | 1.3273 | 0.05342 | 110 | 79 | 26 | 5 |
1604 | Frankly, I expected worse. | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1605 | The only remote is upstairs. | 1.3273 | 0.05934 | 110 | 83 | 18 | 9 |
1606 | We used to get some televangelists, but they're all down here now. | 1.3273 | 0.06073 | 110 | 84 | 16 | 10 |
1607 | It's either this or Fox News. | 1.3273 | 0.05792 | 110 | 82 | 20 | 8 |
1608 | This is the only reality show where you want to be the first one voted off the island. | 1.3273 | 0.05792 | 110 | 82 | 20 | 8 |
1609 | I can’t believe it isn’t set to FOX NEWS. | 1.3273 | 0.05934 | 110 | 83 | 18 | 9 |
1610 | New here? It's not so bad, now. They used to make us watch Maury. | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1611 | Do you suppose he tapes Colbert? | 1.3273 | 0.05646 | 110 | 81 | 22 | 7 |
1612 | The frackers pumped out all the gas... | 1.3273 | 0.05792 | 110 | 82 | 20 | 8 |
1613 | I wonder what they're watching upstairs. | 1.3273 | 0.05646 | 110 | 81 | 22 | 7 |
1614 | Do you feel a draft..? I feel a draft. | 1.3273 | 0.05342 | 110 | 79 | 26 | 5 |
1615 | You think we can fast-forward? | 1.3273 | 0.05184 | 110 | 78 | 28 | 4 |
1616 | And you’ll all be issued utterly useless remotes. | 1.3273 | 0.05934 | 110 | 83 | 18 | 9 |
1617 | Remind me again, whats the difference between a Religion and a Cult? | 1.3273 | 0.05496 | 110 | 80 | 24 | 6 |
1618 | God, orientation week is such a bore! | 1.3273 | 0.05342 | 110 | 79 | 26 | 5 |
1619 | This is the audition for ' Naked and Afraid', right? | 1.3273 | 0.05792 | 110 | 82 | 20 | 8 |
1620 | I know a guy who can get us cable down here, but he's a real sleazeball. | 1.3273 | 0.05792 | 110 | 82 | 20 | 8 |
1621 | As soon as I saw the rabbit ears and the crummy reception, I knew I was in Hell. | 1.3273 | 0.05934 | 110 | 83 | 18 | 9 |
1622 | Do you feel a draft? | 1.3273 | 0.05646 | 110 | 81 | 22 | 7 |
1623 | It's all about reducing carbon dioxide emissions—the devil is in the details. | 1.3273 | 0.05646 | 110 | 81 | 22 | 7 |
1624 | I think we have to bare our soul as well. | 1.3248 | 0.05126 | 117 | 84 | 28 | 5 |
1625 | Wanna get out of here? | 1.3243 | 0.05302 | 111 | 80 | 26 | 5 |
1626 | Budget cuts. We used to get the real thing. | 1.3243 | 0.05145 | 111 | 79 | 28 | 4 |
1627 | Now he's claiming he reinvented fire. Another stunning inroad into his Make Hell Great Again blah de blah. | 1.3243 | 0.05747 | 111 | 83 | 20 | 8 |
1628 | Marshall McLuhan was right - the medium is the message. | 1.3243 | 0.05602 | 111 | 82 | 22 | 7 |
1629 | The weather report is always the same! | 1.3243 | 0.05302 | 111 | 80 | 26 | 5 |
1630 | I always wondered what they'd do with a masochist in Hell. | 1.3241 | 0.05555 | 108 | 79 | 23 | 6 |
1631 | This is something of a reprieve. I left a woman scorned. | 1.3241 | 0.05066 | 108 | 76 | 29 | 3 |
1632 | All this punishment because of a stupid fig leaf ? | 1.3241 | 0.05397 | 108 | 78 | 25 | 5 |
1633 | I guess there's a special place in hell for couch potatoes! | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1634 | Apparently, cable and flatscreen are only for the 1% | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1635 | Where am I supposed to pin my orientation name tag? | 1.3241 | 0.05234 | 108 | 77 | 27 | 4 |
1636 | Cheer up! The previews only last 1000 years. | 1.3241 | 0.05555 | 108 | 79 | 23 | 6 |
1637 | I prefer the U.K. version. | 1.3241 | 0.05234 | 108 | 77 | 27 | 4 |
1638 | TV for eternity, that's the punishment. | 1.3241 | 0.05858 | 108 | 81 | 19 | 8 |
1639 | I always did hate reality TV. | 1.3241 | 0.05234 | 108 | 77 | 27 | 4 |
1640 | I bet Scott Pruitt will be shocked when he finds out Hades has gone carbon neutral. | 1.3241 | 0.04892 | 108 | 75 | 31 | 2 |
1641 | I hate these previews of upcoming events! | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1642 | Perhaps they have brimstone on another channel. | 1.3241 | 0.06146 | 108 | 83 | 15 | 10 |
1643 | No, we have 665 other channels, but all they show are “Real Housewives” marathons. | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1644 | No, really! That's the whole difference, up there they have flat screen. | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1645 | At first I was skeptical. But this timeshare presentation has me thinking. | 1.3241 | 0.06004 | 108 | 82 | 17 | 9 |
1646 | AND no WiFi. | 1.3241 | 0.05397 | 108 | 78 | 25 | 5 |
1647 | Do you think he could turn it up? | 1.3241 | 0.05066 | 108 | 76 | 29 | 3 |
1648 | You were expecting a flat-screen TV in Hell? | 1.3241 | 0.05555 | 108 | 79 | 23 | 6 |
1649 | I love the Yule Log channel. | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1650 | It's either this or The Bachelor. | 1.3241 | 0.06146 | 108 | 83 | 15 | 10 |
1651 | ...masochists get only the televised version... | 1.3241 | 0.06004 | 108 | 82 | 17 | 9 |
1652 | And you thought I was cheap. | 1.3241 | 0.05555 | 108 | 79 | 23 | 6 |
1653 | Glasses are useless ‘cause they keep fogging up. | 1.3241 | 0.06146 | 108 | 83 | 15 | 10 |
1654 | Thank God the State of the Union address is only once a year. | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1655 | At least we don’t have to watch “The Apprentice” for eternity. | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1656 | Welcome to the logical conclusion of reality television evolution. | 1.3241 | 0.05858 | 108 | 81 | 19 | 8 |
1657 | Have you seen the remote control? | 1.3241 | 0.05555 | 108 | 79 | 23 | 6 |
1658 | Looks like its going to be another scorcher. | 1.3241 | 0.05234 | 108 | 77 | 27 | 4 |
1659 | We only get the first season down here. | 1.3241 | 0.05555 | 108 | 79 | 23 | 6 |
1660 | So Burning in Hell for Eternity is just another reality tv show? | 1.3241 | 0.05397 | 108 | 78 | 25 | 5 |
1661 | I knew it! No cable. | 1.3241 | 0.05234 | 108 | 77 | 27 | 4 |
1662 | I'll always think you're hot. | 1.3241 | 0.05555 | 108 | 79 | 23 | 6 |
1663 | I guess we all have to play our part in curbing global warming. | 1.3241 | 0.05066 | 108 | 76 | 29 | 3 |
1664 | No, I don't have the remote in my pocket! | 1.3241 | 0.06004 | 108 | 82 | 17 | 9 |
1665 | An old tube TV? That settles it. We're in hell. | 1.3241 | 0.05397 | 108 | 78 | 25 | 5 |
1666 | Coming up next...Dante’s Inferno...stay tuned | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1667 | If you think it’s so bad here keep it up and I’ll send you to the White House! | 1.3241 | 0.05858 | 108 | 81 | 19 | 8 |
1668 | We're about to head to the open bar, but first this short presentation about an exciting real estate opportunity! | 1.3241 | 0.05397 | 108 | 78 | 25 | 5 |
1669 | At least the weather forcast is always accurate..! | 1.3241 | 0.05397 | 108 | 78 | 25 | 5 |
1670 | When we were first dating you used to take me to live shows. | 1.3241 | 0.06004 | 108 | 82 | 17 | 9 |
1671 | Look on the bright side - we won't be fighting over the remote. | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1672 | Damn! Looks like the evangelicals were right. | 1.3241 | 0.05555 | 108 | 79 | 23 | 6 |
1673 | The reception is hell on these old sets. | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1674 | No, Honey I don't think that's the Yule log! | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1675 | Here comes the timeshare pitch. | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1676 | It 's not as hot as it looks | 1.3241 | 0.05234 | 108 | 77 | 27 | 4 |
1677 | I just figured we’d be watching “Keeping up with the Kardashian’s” forever. | 1.3241 | 0.05555 | 108 | 79 | 23 | 6 |
1678 | That's right, no cable, no remote control, and you have to use the dog ears for reception. Welcome to hell. | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1679 | No cable, no color. This really is hell. | 1.3241 | 0.06004 | 108 | 82 | 17 | 9 |
1680 | Reruns are hell. | 1.3241 | 0.05858 | 108 | 81 | 19 | 8 |
1681 | If anyone changes the channel they put the Donald on for eternity. | 1.3241 | 0.06004 | 108 | 82 | 17 | 9 |
1682 | These old tube sets have warmer tones, don't they? | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1683 | What's a good girl like you doing here? | 1.3241 | 0.06004 | 108 | 82 | 17 | 9 |
1684 | It still beats watching Fox News with my parents in Omaha. | 1.3241 | 0.05858 | 108 | 81 | 19 | 8 |
1685 | Good morning everyone, and welcome to orientation! | 1.3241 | 0.05858 | 108 | 81 | 19 | 8 |
1686 | Satan's decided to go green. Saving a bundle on fuel. | 1.3241 | 0.05397 | 108 | 78 | 25 | 5 |
1687 | Horrible reception. | 1.3241 | 0.05234 | 108 | 77 | 27 | 4 |
1688 | Does anyone know how to change the channel? | 1.3241 | 0.05708 | 108 | 80 | 21 | 7 |
1689 | This is my first time doing performance art. | 1.3241 | 0.05555 | 108 | 79 | 23 | 6 |
1690 | Fake news! They’re just warming us up. | 1.3241 | 0.06004 | 108 | 82 | 17 | 9 |
1691 | I'm not surprised that eternal punishment begins with an employee onboarding video. | 1.3241 | 0.06004 | 108 | 82 | 17 | 9 |
1692 | It's a virtual Hell here! | 1.3235 | 0.05243 | 102 | 72 | 27 | 3 |
1693 | Apparently Hell is carbon neutral now. | 1.3235 | 0.05938 | 102 | 76 | 19 | 7 |
1694 | White House daily press briefing. | 1.3222 | 0.06482 | 90 | 68 | 15 | 7 |
1695 | You know, I think the reception is better down here. | 1.3211 | 0.05355 | 109 | 79 | 25 | 5 |
1696 | Mind if I change channels? | 1.3211 | 0.05512 | 109 | 80 | 23 | 6 |
1697 | The Seventh Circle has cable, but there's nothing on. | 1.3211 | 0.05664 | 109 | 81 | 21 | 7 |
1698 | I hear they're running out of room. | 1.3211 | 0.05512 | 109 | 80 | 23 | 6 |
1699 | Last year's "State of Etenal Damnation Address" took 600 hours. | 1.3211 | 0.05512 | 109 | 80 | 23 | 6 |
1700 | It’s got the viewing audience of the super bowl, plus you can’t wait for the commercials | 1.3211 | 0.05512 | 109 | 80 | 23 | 6 |
1701 | Usually I avoid watching the trailers, I like to be surprised. | 1.3211 | 0.05355 | 109 | 79 | 25 | 5 |
1702 | And you will not be permitted to pause, rewind or fast forward. | 1.3211 | 0.05355 | 109 | 79 | 25 | 5 |
1703 | Apparently the fuel bill to run the old fire pit was costing him an arm and a cloven hoof ! | 1.3211 | 0.05194 | 109 | 78 | 27 | 4 |
1704 | It’s either this or Hell’s newest hit show, Chicago Sanitation. | 1.3211 | 0.05512 | 109 | 80 | 23 | 6 |
1705 | This is worse than Hell! We have to watch Fox! | 1.3211 | 0.05512 | 109 | 80 | 23 | 6 |
1706 | This is why it's called Limbo! | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1707 | It’s hell without cable. | 1.3208 | 0.05927 | 106 | 80 | 18 | 8 |
1708 | Coming attractions. | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1709 | The carbon tax here must be hell. | 1.3208 | 0.05453 | 106 | 77 | 24 | 5 |
1710 | Who needs to watch "Naked & Afraid" when you can be naked and afraid. | 1.3208 | 0.05927 | 106 | 80 | 18 | 8 |
1711 | It's this or Fox News. | 1.3208 | 0.06076 | 106 | 81 | 16 | 9 |
1712 | Must be a cooking channel. | 1.3208 | 0.05773 | 106 | 79 | 20 | 7 |
1713 | Typical, we only get the Fireplace Channel. | 1.3208 | 0.05773 | 106 | 79 | 20 | 7 |
1714 | Lucky we're not in Hawaii. | 1.3208 | 0.06076 | 106 | 81 | 16 | 9 |
1715 | Season 1 was better. | 1.3208 | 0.05453 | 106 | 77 | 24 | 5 |
1716 | funny how I used to hate pledge week and now I miss it | 1.3208 | 0.05453 | 106 | 77 | 24 | 5 |
1717 | No one's made it to the end so there's no spoilers! | 1.3208 | 0.05286 | 106 | 76 | 26 | 4 |
1718 | The first circle of hell is just fire safety training videos. | 1.3208 | 0.05927 | 106 | 80 | 18 | 8 |
1719 | We knew it would be bad, but, for the love of GOD we don't even get cable? | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1720 | Glad I was able to squeeze into this orientation session. What'd I miss? | 1.3208 | 0.05773 | 106 | 79 | 20 | 7 |
1721 | The other place has HD, cable, and a remote that works. | 1.3208 | 0.06076 | 106 | 81 | 16 | 9 |
1722 | Showing 'The Naked and The Dead' every night does not mean he's witty. | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1723 | He keeps promising us a bathroom break at the next commercial. | 1.3208 | 0.05453 | 106 | 77 | 24 | 5 |
1724 | Pretty good reception down here. | 1.3208 | 0.05453 | 106 | 77 | 24 | 5 |
1725 | The torture is that there's no remote. | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1726 | For what I did, I don't deserve to be in the overflow room. | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1727 | They don't even have cable. It really *is* hell. | 1.3208 | 0.05927 | 106 | 80 | 18 | 8 |
1728 | His Dad set these parental controls after the Fall. | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1729 | This is white collar Hell. | 1.3208 | 0.05286 | 106 | 76 | 26 | 4 |
1730 | Orientation. | 1.3208 | 0.05286 | 106 | 76 | 26 | 4 |
1731 | No cable and only ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN & FOX... this really IS Hell. | 1.3208 | 0.05453 | 106 | 77 | 24 | 5 |
1732 | He's gone carbon neutral. | 1.3208 | 0.05773 | 106 | 79 | 20 | 7 |
1733 | Unfortunately, it's not fake news. | 1.3208 | 0.05927 | 106 | 80 | 18 | 8 |
1734 | During orientation you will learn it is not so much the heat as it is the humidity. | 1.3208 | 0.05773 | 106 | 79 | 20 | 7 |
1735 | You will now be divided into four groups as follows. Rare, medium rare, medium and well done. | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1736 | I swear to God touch me one more time and I'll call him over! | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1737 | We only get one channel, it's Hillary's burning emails. | 1.3208 | 0.05773 | 106 | 79 | 20 | 7 |
1738 | Eh, the book was better | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1739 | No more actual brimstone; blame legal. | 1.3208 | 0.05773 | 106 | 79 | 20 | 7 |
1740 | The reception is good but the content is hell. | 1.3208 | 0.06076 | 106 | 81 | 16 | 9 |
1741 | What in Hell are we watching? | 1.3208 | 0.06076 | 106 | 81 | 16 | 9 |
1742 | This isn't exactly the reception I expected.... | 1.3208 | 0.05286 | 106 | 76 | 26 | 4 |
1743 | No flat screen? Now I know we're in hell. | 1.3208 | 0.05927 | 106 | 80 | 18 | 8 |
1744 | Actually, you don't get the full experience without the smell of brimstone. | 1.3208 | 0.05286 | 106 | 76 | 26 | 4 |
1745 | I heard that this part of the orientation lasts 1000 years. | 1.3208 | 0.05453 | 106 | 77 | 24 | 5 |
1746 | Is this the prequel? | 1.3208 | 0.05453 | 106 | 77 | 24 | 5 |
1747 | The GOOD news is that you’ll have TV. The BAD news is that you’ll have TV. | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1748 | The Rapture will be televised. | 1.3208 | 0.05773 | 106 | 79 | 20 | 7 |
1749 | I hate it when he makes us watch the news | 1.3208 | 0.05615 | 106 | 78 | 22 | 6 |
1750 | This show is so hot right now. | 1.3208 | 0.05773 | 106 | 79 | 20 | 7 |
1751 | So this is where all the ratings are coming from. | 1.3208 | 0.05286 | 106 | 76 | 26 | 4 |
1752 | So is this today's weather or the forecast? | 1.3200 | 0.05840 | 100 | 74 | 20 | 6 |
1753 | The reception isn't great, but we also get Fox News down here. | 1.3182 | 0.05314 | 110 | 80 | 25 | 5 |
1754 | On Christmas they switch to the yule log! | 1.3182 | 0.05469 | 110 | 81 | 23 | 6 |
1755 | Good thing you’re not in that shithole | 1.3178 | 0.05727 | 107 | 80 | 20 | 7 |
1756 | Is it me, or has Satan been absolutely insufferable ever since he landed the deal with Netflix? | 1.3178 | 0.05245 | 107 | 77 | 26 | 4 |
1757 | Eternal Damnation Yule Log ... Priceless. | 1.3178 | 0.05727 | 107 | 80 | 20 | 7 |
1758 | This is just until they complete the natural gas installation. | 1.3178 | 0.06027 | 107 | 82 | 16 | 9 |
1759 | But there weren't enough of us to help him win the popular vote | 1.3178 | 0.06171 | 107 | 83 | 14 | 10 |
1760 | The real sin here is analog TV. | 1.3178 | 0.05410 | 107 | 78 | 24 | 5 |
1761 | Just when I thought it couldn't get worse, now we have to watch 'Reality TV in Hell'. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1762 | Note to Sartre: Hell is TV without cable. | 1.3173 | 0.05339 | 104 | 75 | 25 | 4 |
1763 | The worst part is there are no subtitles | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1764 | It's like the new museum but without the exit through the gift shop. | 1.3173 | 0.05339 | 104 | 75 | 25 | 4 |
1765 | I was a fixer for a major client. And you? | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1766 | Hannity isn't even trying anymore | 1.3173 | 0.05997 | 104 | 79 | 17 | 8 |
1767 | I thought this was a place for rich people. | 1.3173 | 0.05997 | 104 | 79 | 17 | 8 |
1768 | So what, they just alternate this and The Jersey Shore? | 1.3173 | 0.05997 | 104 | 79 | 17 | 8 |
1769 | Well it is better than the View. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1770 | Oh, great, more reruns. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1771 | I heard that this is just temporary...till the icecaps are melted | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1772 | The picture is great! It’s almost as if we are there. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1773 | At the commercial break we get to watch infomercials for 170 years. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1774 | The first season was so much better. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1775 | The only channel we get down here is FOX News. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1776 | You really do know this is hell. No cable, just rabbit ears and the same damn channel. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1777 | "...devilishly funny.." Peter Travers, Rolling Stone | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1778 | This place seems to be outdated. Wanna get the hell outta here? | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1779 | You know, I thought watching C-SPAN was painful enough. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1780 | Commercial free is not always a good thing. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1781 | The orientation IS hell. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1782 | Forget about the outdated television, I thought there'd be more be more Black people here. | 1.3173 | 0.06301 | 104 | 81 | 13 | 10 |
1783 | At least they don't get cable news down here. | 1.3173 | 0.05339 | 104 | 75 | 25 | 4 |
1784 | It doesn't really pack the same punch on the small screen. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1785 | Rabbit ears. Now there's your real hell. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1786 | From what I hear,viewer discretion is advised. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1787 | In Purgatory we just get the trailer. | 1.3173 | 0.04976 | 104 | 73 | 29 | 2 |
1788 | One channel and there's nothing to see. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1789 | It was either this or Fox & Friends. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1790 | This is only the 6th Level. The 7th makes you deal with cable. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1791 | I can't say much for their customer service, but it's a helluva improvement over Comcast's. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1792 | At least on the other channels you get snow. | 1.3173 | 0.06301 | 104 | 81 | 13 | 10 |
1793 | No matter what he says, don't pull his tail. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1794 | Ugh. Reality TV again tonight. | 1.3173 | 0.06151 | 104 | 80 | 15 | 9 |
1795 | Looks like our Amazon Fire account runs through eternity. | 1.3173 | 0.05997 | 104 | 79 | 17 | 8 |
1796 | So far so good--no long PowerPoints and no icebreaker games. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1797 | It's a commercial for your new home; it runs twenty-four seven. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1798 | I’m surprised how good the reception is down here. | 1.3173 | 0.05161 | 104 | 74 | 27 | 3 |
1799 | Oh this again, I've seen this a least thousand times. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1800 | Welcome to orientation. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1801 | He’s just trying to scare us. It’s only a movie on a crappy old TV. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1802 | You know, I directed this. | 1.3173 | 0.05339 | 104 | 75 | 25 | 4 |
1803 | Did I miss Judge Judy? | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1804 | Well, looks like Sartre got it all wrong ! | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1805 | Of course, no cable. | 1.3173 | 0.05997 | 104 | 79 | 17 | 8 |
1806 | Must be Christmas Eve. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1807 | I think I'm in the wrong orientation session. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1808 | Must be Purgatory. Hell would be Trump. | 1.3173 | 0.05997 | 104 | 79 | 17 | 8 |
1809 | I heard the new torture is having to watch & listen to a Sarah Huckabee Sanders press briefing...on a loop... | 1.3173 | 0.06301 | 104 | 81 | 13 | 10 |
1810 | And there's no way to "skip ad". | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1811 | It’s worse than I thought. 24 hours a day of Fox News. | 1.3173 | 0.06447 | 104 | 82 | 11 | 11 |
1812 | I just hope there are no ads. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1813 | Tomorrow we watch C-Span. | 1.3173 | 0.06301 | 104 | 81 | 13 | 10 |
1814 | Not one of us is really looking at the TV. | 1.3173 | 0.06151 | 104 | 80 | 15 | 9 |
1815 | I wish it was fake news. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1816 | I hear he's working on a syndication deal with Fox. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1817 | How did you end up in economy class? | 1.3173 | 0.06151 | 104 | 80 | 15 | 9 |
1818 | I hear heaven has cable. | 1.3173 | 0.06151 | 104 | 80 | 15 | 9 |
1819 | If it were heaven, that'd be a digital flat screen. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1820 | Isn't this a bit of overkill? | 1.3173 | 0.05997 | 104 | 79 | 17 | 8 |
1821 | When he's mad, he switches it to "Everybody Loves Raymond." | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1822 | I brought a doctor's note to Jury Duty, too, and they didn't make me stay for Orientation. Just saying... | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1823 | The naked truth ... this is virtual hell! | 1.3173 | 0.05339 | 104 | 75 | 25 | 4 |
1824 | I heard that in the 8th Circle, the only thing you get to watch are "The Apprentice" reruns. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1825 | He'd probably get more heat if he put a little tin foil on the antenna. | 1.3173 | 0.05339 | 104 | 75 | 25 | 4 |
1826 | To hell with Amazon Fire TV. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1827 | Standby for words from Donald F. Trump. | 1.3173 | 0.06301 | 104 | 81 | 13 | 10 |
1828 | What are you doing after the movie? | 1.3173 | 0.06151 | 104 | 80 | 15 | 9 |
1829 | I was prepared for the heat, but standard definition? | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1830 | I hate re-runs... | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1831 | We should have researched the timeshare before we took the free vacation. | 1.3173 | 0.05997 | 104 | 79 | 17 | 8 |
1832 | I've seen this one before, it's another re-heat. | 1.3173 | 0.05339 | 104 | 75 | 25 | 4 |
1833 | In Heaven they have a 60 inch flat screen | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1834 | TV helps me take my mind off of things. | 1.3173 | 0.05339 | 104 | 75 | 25 | 4 |
1835 | What the Hell? | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1836 | They switch it to the Yule Log once a year, but in July, just to mess with us. | 1.3173 | 0.06151 | 104 | 80 | 15 | 9 |
1837 | Could be a lot worse, like old Lawrence Welk shows. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1838 | Anybody seen the remote? | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1839 | It's more consuming than I expected. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1840 | The safety videos always bore me. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1841 | Thinking 'bout changing my church membership. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1842 | Think he'd turn on the ball game if I asked nicely? | 1.3173 | 0.06301 | 104 | 81 | 13 | 10 |
1843 | At least it's real news. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1844 | I'm not sure the network is ready for "Naked Apprentices". | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1845 | Apparently there's also a special place in hell for nudists. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1846 | You're a newbie? Well, we've just completed 400 years of 24/7 Gilligan's Island reruns. Next is The Apprentice. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1847 | It used to be a PowerPoint. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1848 | I know our EPA boss says we have to watch FOX, but did they have to take our clothes too? | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1849 | I've seen it before. It's not so hot. | 1.3173 | 0.05339 | 104 | 75 | 25 | 4 |
1850 | It's this or Fox. | 1.3173 | 0.06151 | 104 | 80 | 15 | 9 |
1851 | Even Hades accepts climate change as a reality. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1852 | The ultimate punishment...Reality TV! | 1.3173 | 0.05997 | 104 | 79 | 17 | 8 |
1853 | This may be a case where the movie is actually better than the book! | 1.3173 | 0.05339 | 104 | 75 | 25 | 4 |
1854 | And right when this orientation was looking promising. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1855 | If I knew we couldn't get cable I would have behaved better. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1856 | I always saw Lucifer as a Fox News kinda guy. | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1857 | No cable! What the hell? | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1858 | It only gets PBS | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1859 | Eternity is a long replay | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1860 | This next bit's my favorite. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1861 | Wait, and you are sure we are not in the White House? | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1862 | I was pretty confident we would be able to get Fox News down here. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1863 | I heard the orientation makes it seem worse than it is. | 1.3173 | 0.05840 | 104 | 78 | 19 | 7 |
1864 | I'm actually a fan of reality TV. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1865 | Next up: 30 continuous days of 'Keeping up with the Kardashians' | 1.3173 | 0.05511 | 104 | 76 | 23 | 5 |
1866 | It's not as bad as having to watch reruns of The Apprentice. | 1.3173 | 0.05677 | 104 | 77 | 21 | 6 |
1867 | I'm more confused than ever about this whole purgatory thing. | 1.3163 | 0.05542 | 98 | 71 | 23 | 4 |
1868 | No, I think the punishment here is that it's an old model tube television. | 1.3163 | 0.06255 | 98 | 75 | 15 | 8 |
1869 | Anything less than 3840 x 2160 pixels is hell for me. | 1.3153 | 0.05427 | 111 | 82 | 23 | 6 |
1870 | It's called "The Insurance Channel." | 1.3148 | 0.05978 | 108 | 83 | 16 | 9 |
1871 | I hear if you don't behave, they send you back. | 1.3148 | 0.05527 | 108 | 80 | 22 | 6 |
1872 | We’ll damn! The rumors about hell being owned by the cable companies are true! | 1.3148 | 0.05831 | 108 | 82 | 18 | 8 |
1873 | In Heaven, I hear it's fluffy clouds on HD Flat Screens. | 1.3148 | 0.05527 | 108 | 80 | 22 | 6 |
1874 | I am naked and afraid. | 1.3143 | 0.05792 | 105 | 79 | 19 | 7 |
1875 | Who says this is worse than trying to unsubscribe from Comcast? | 1.3143 | 0.05466 | 105 | 77 | 23 | 5 |
1876 | In an act of pure torture, the devil played fire and brimstone on TV instead of the royal wedding. | 1.3143 | 0.05792 | 105 | 79 | 19 | 7 |
1877 | The first season was so much better. | 1.3143 | 0.06248 | 105 | 82 | 13 | 10 |
1878 | I bet you I can flip this place in a week with an upgraded home theater system and central air install. | 1.3143 | 0.05792 | 105 | 79 | 19 | 7 |
1879 | Damn, another rerun. | 1.3143 | 0.05792 | 105 | 79 | 19 | 7 |
1880 | Reruns, again? It's like they want us to suffer. | 1.3143 | 0.05631 | 105 | 78 | 21 | 6 |
1881 | Hey, I love the Yule Log! | 1.3143 | 0.05792 | 105 | 79 | 19 | 7 |
1882 | For an orientation video, the production values aren't bad. | 1.3143 | 0.05792 | 105 | 79 | 19 | 7 |
1883 | Well, it's better than Fox. | 1.3143 | 0.05948 | 105 | 80 | 17 | 8 |
1884 | They said there was a special place for television show critics... | 1.3143 | 0.06100 | 105 | 81 | 15 | 9 |
1885 | I didn't realize pre-marital counseling was so intense. | 1.3143 | 0.05948 | 105 | 80 | 17 | 8 |
1886 | Actually, this isn’t the hellish part. Just wait for Fox News to begin. | 1.3143 | 0.05792 | 105 | 79 | 19 | 7 |
1887 | I hate reality TV. | 1.3143 | 0.06100 | 105 | 81 | 15 | 9 |
1888 | Last week it was reruns of "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" and "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo." | 1.3143 | 0.05948 | 105 | 80 | 17 | 8 |
1889 | I've been to worse orientations. | 1.3143 | 0.05631 | 105 | 78 | 21 | 6 |
1890 | Direct feed to Fox News...this is hell! | 1.3143 | 0.06100 | 105 | 81 | 15 | 9 |
1891 | You'll receive a certificate when you complete your orientation. | 1.3143 | 0.05948 | 105 | 80 | 17 | 8 |
1892 | I hate when people force you to watch their favorite TV show. | 1.3143 | 0.05296 | 105 | 76 | 25 | 4 |
1893 | To be honest, I never saw boobs on Earth. | 1.3137 | 0.05020 | 102 | 72 | 28 | 2 |
1894 | It's not even HD. Can it get any worse? | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1895 | God I'd kill to watch The Crown right now. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1896 | I didn't know that watching the world go up in flames would get such high ratings. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1897 | Heaven must have cable. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1898 | If that is all hell is, it was worth it. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1899 | Huh - more fake news. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1900 | It's an orientation video. I'm told it's narrated by the President. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1901 | In heaven they get flatscreens. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1902 | I guess the cable deal I sold my soul for expired when I died. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1903 | The recession sure is hitting Hell hard. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1904 | They’re trying to reduce global warming | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1905 | I don’t know what’s worse — being naked or having Spectrum as our cable provider. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1906 | Forced to stand and watch the Weather Channel forever... about what I expected. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1907 | It's like the holiday yule log video only with brimstone. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1908 | Well, where would you hide the remote? | 1.3137 | 0.05020 | 102 | 72 | 28 | 2 |
1909 | It's exactly like they pictured it on TV. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1910 | reality tv. | 1.3137 | 0.06228 | 102 | 79 | 14 | 9 |
1911 | The cable companies are in a different circle of Hell. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1912 | Their virtual reality isn't exactly cutting-edge, is it? | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1913 | Yes, you are dead, and this is hell, so, abandon all hope and uh yada yada yada. Shut up and watch the orientation program already! | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1914 | Are they serving lunch after the promotional video, or do we have to listen to him pitch the place as well? | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1915 | They're going to force us to watch "Towering Inferno" in black & white. | 1.3137 | 0.05210 | 102 | 73 | 26 | 3 |
1916 | We got a much better view than the folks who are going to be looking at the side of the TV for eternity. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1917 | Reality TV has gone to hell. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1918 | You have to watch the sales pitch to get the free vacation. | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1919 | Aw, hell, I think it’s a rerun! | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1920 | I got here late, but it think it's the "Coming Attractions". | 1.3137 | 0.05020 | 102 | 72 | 28 | 2 |
1921 | Don’t you hate it when the previews gives away the ending? | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1922 | On the plus side, it's commercial-free. | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1923 | It'll be much worse once they get HDTV... | 1.3137 | 0.06228 | 102 | 79 | 14 | 9 |
1924 | I hope he votes me off on tonight's episode. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1925 | Don't worry about the picture quality. ?Beelzebub announced that the cable installer would be here between 8 a.m. and eternity. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1926 | I don’t remember reading about this in the Terms and Conditions. | 1.3137 | 0.06382 | 102 | 80 | 12 | 10 |
1927 | Seriously? | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1928 | The smoke alarm kept going off. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1929 | In Heaven the streets are lined with 110 inch Ultra HD TV's and angels bring you buttered popcorn. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1930 | And I thought Satan ran the cable TV industry. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1931 | Makes me hot, how about you? | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1932 | It’s a documentary about the environment. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1933 | Nice of him to ease us into it. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1934 | I wrote GEICO ads when I was alive. You? | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1935 | These days they just make us watch the fireplace channel | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1936 | I can handle the heat, but having to watch Fox News is just the worst. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1937 | Orientation. I can see why they don't go to a lot of expense. It's a pretty easy concept to grasp. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1938 | Let's hope it's fake news. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1939 | No! No! It’s just a prelude to the White House press briefing. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1940 | The worst part is finding out that Hell hasn't gone digital yet. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1941 | Don't worry folks. IT'S DRY HEAT! | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1942 | Local news — always with such doom and gloom. | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1943 | All this plasma here and He can’t manage to scare up a flat screen tv? | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1944 | amazing reception for rabbit ears | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1945 | I have had enough of this reality TV! | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1946 | Spoiler Alert. It doesn’t end well. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1947 | I'm just glad it's not another 'Roseanne' rerun. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1948 | I heard they have all the cable channels in heaven. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1949 | It really doesn't live up to the hype. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1950 | I hear that in the seventh circle they have Netflix | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1951 | Something tells me this isn’t fake news. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1952 | The fire orientation is very retro, but I heard the brimstone orientation is a multimedia extravaganza! | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1953 | No, actually, this is Hellish. | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1954 | It's really not that different from home. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1955 | It's less painful than I had imagined, but more depressing. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1956 | They did say that the timeshare pitch would be for a hell of a trip to a hotspot destination. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1957 | I never knew how much I'd miss cable. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1958 | The cable is down, surprise | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1959 | I never imagined it would be this chilly here. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1960 | I don't think we really need a preview. | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1961 | Today's forecast: Hot with a 20% chance of brimstone | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1962 | This is kinda nice. The wife and I used to watch a Yule Log on TV around the holidays. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1963 | Hell is not having cable. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1964 | Don’t worry the pilot is always the worst episode | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1965 | This really is hell....no cable! | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1966 | I totally just saw where the loop started again. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1967 | It's definitely hell because there's no remote. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1968 | I heard heaven has a 52" flat panel. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1969 | I can't change it! Someone's stolen the remote. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1970 | I’m beginning to think this fire and brimstone talk is fake news | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1971 | The genius of this place is not having a remote. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1972 | You would think he could afford a flatscreen. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1973 | When I first got here I was relieved, but after a while it's as boring as hell. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1974 | You are hot. So am I. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1975 | Mind telling me what the hell is going on? | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1976 | These virtual tours are okay but they just don't capture the soul of eternal damnation. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1977 | It's just not the same experience when viewed online. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1978 | For every show, from Walking Dead to Game of Thrones, they cut the last ten minutes. I tell you, it's hell. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1979 | Hey, it could be worse. In the innermost circle they have to stand on stilettos and watch The Kardashians for eternity. | 1.3137 | 0.06382 | 102 | 80 | 12 | 10 |
1980 | Clothed captioning is only available on the upstairs TV. | 1.3137 | 0.06228 | 102 | 79 | 14 | 9 |
1981 | Do you think they get cable in heaven? | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1982 | Okay...the fight against global warming has gotten seriously out of hand! | 1.3137 | 0.05020 | 102 | 72 | 28 | 2 |
1983 | Every so often the antenna picks up brimstone. | 1.3137 | 0.05020 | 102 | 72 | 28 | 2 |
1984 | ¨Who keeps telling him not to change it?¨ | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1985 | I heard they have flat screens in heaven. I shouldn't have used the carpool lane alone... | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1986 | Turns out, the worst thing really is waiting for the cable guy. | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1987 | I hear you get an iPod in heaven. | 1.3137 | 0.06070 | 102 | 78 | 16 | 8 |
1988 | Welcome to Hell, it’s cable with only one channel! | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1989 | On Tuesday’s we watch Backdraft. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1990 | What the hell... no flat screen!? | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1991 | Don't say a word otherwise it's back to Fox News! | 1.3137 | 0.05908 | 102 | 77 | 18 | 7 |
1992 | It's called "Hell on Earth". It's our favorite show since Trump took office. | 1.3137 | 0.06228 | 102 | 79 | 14 | 9 |
1993 | This movie is making me hot! | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1994 | He's saving tons with this fire video since the price of oil went up. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1995 | 24/7 newstainment...this must be hell. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1996 | Coming up next: brimstone! | 1.3137 | 0.05393 | 102 | 74 | 24 | 4 |
1997 | It's mandatory viewing once every thousand years. Seems the people in HR just don't get it. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
1998 | I hear the other place has Hulu. | 1.3137 | 0.05742 | 102 | 76 | 20 | 6 |
1999 | Do we have to watch is vacation videos again? | 1.3137 | 0.05210 | 102 | 73 | 26 | 3 |
2000 | Don’t even think about changing the channel. | 1.3137 | 0.05570 | 102 | 75 | 22 | 5 |
2001 | Wow! Great reception for rabbit ears! | 1.3125 | 0.05795 | 96 | 71 | 20 | 5 |
2002 | Oh, we're in Hell alright; not only is that not a flat screen, it's the only channel. | 1.3113 | 0.05423 | 106 | 78 | 23 | 5 |
2003 | Sound is terrible, but it's a Hell of a picture! | 1.3111 | 0.06447 | 90 | 69 | 14 | 7 |
2004 | Fox News would have been hell. | 1.3107 | 0.05524 | 103 | 76 | 22 | 5 |
2005 | Beats watching the news. | 1.3107 | 0.05349 | 103 | 75 | 24 | 4 |
2006 | I never liked the Yule log much either | 1.3107 | 0.06019 | 103 | 79 | 16 | 8 |
2007 | These time-share presentations are hell! | 1.3107 | 0.05858 | 103 | 78 | 18 | 7 |
2008 | Down here you can't expect more than local programming. | 1.3107 | 0.06175 | 103 | 80 | 14 | 9 |
2009 | At least they let me keep my glasses for this. | 1.3107 | 0.05349 | 103 | 75 | 24 | 4 |
2010 | Actually, I would rather be cast into a real lake of fire. | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2011 | It's a lot cheaper than keeping those fires going constantly. | 1.3100 | 0.05631 | 100 | 74 | 21 | 5 |
2012 | A blatant violation of net neutrality. | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2013 | One person sues Hell one time, and now we all have to attend the annual safety presentation. | 1.3100 | 0.05449 | 100 | 73 | 23 | 4 |
2014 | It looks a lot less scary on a black and white TV. | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2015 | That's right. 66 episodes of Game of Thrones... we will never play the 67th. | 1.3100 | 0.06146 | 100 | 77 | 15 | 8 |
2016 | When Millenials said we Baby Boomers would go to Hell for what we did to the environment, they weren't kidding. | 1.3100 | 0.05631 | 100 | 74 | 21 | 5 |
2017 | We finally got it-nothing is real to us unless we see it on TV. | 1.3100 | 0.06146 | 100 | 77 | 15 | 8 |
2018 | Who'd a thought we'd be the one's to benefit from global warming?! | 1.3100 | 0.05449 | 100 | 73 | 23 | 4 |
2019 | No cable and a small vintage '50s TV. Yeah, it's hell. | 1.3100 | 0.05979 | 100 | 76 | 17 | 7 |
2020 | “Heat rises, so they get global warming up top and mark my words, we’ll start to freeze down here”. | 1.3100 | 0.05979 | 100 | 76 | 17 | 7 |
2021 | Anywhere else and all we'd get would be snow. | 1.3100 | 0.06146 | 100 | 77 | 15 | 8 |
2022 | McLuhan was obviously wrong, but I didn't think I'd learn it this way. | 1.3100 | 0.05979 | 100 | 76 | 17 | 7 |
2023 | It's Hell alright. Not even flat screen TV. | 1.3100 | 0.05260 | 100 | 72 | 25 | 3 |
2024 | This is the snowball episode. One of my favorites. | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2025 | ...ZERO plot development. | 1.3100 | 0.05979 | 100 | 76 | 17 | 7 |
2026 | See? Even hell signed the Paris Agreement. That was our Downfall. | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2027 | It could be worse - they could play Fox News. | 1.3100 | 0.06308 | 100 | 78 | 13 | 9 |
2028 | You know those old tube sets gave off a lot of heat. | 1.3100 | 0.04861 | 100 | 70 | 29 | 1 |
2029 | Of course it's Hell. They don't have cable. | 1.3100 | 0.06146 | 100 | 77 | 15 | 8 |
2030 | I'm not afraid and I'm available for infinity. | 1.3100 | 0.06146 | 100 | 77 | 15 | 8 |
2031 | I think this new format of "Fox and Friends" really sizzles. | 1.3100 | 0.05979 | 100 | 76 | 17 | 7 |
2032 | How is this different? | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2033 | Flat screens and cable would be heaven. | 1.3100 | 0.05260 | 100 | 72 | 25 | 3 |
2034 | Well this a let down. | 1.3100 | 0.05979 | 100 | 76 | 17 | 7 |
2035 | Nothing but white people and basic cable, clearly this is hell. | 1.3100 | 0.06146 | 100 | 77 | 15 | 8 |
2036 | After the introductory video , we pair off and resume sinning. | 1.3100 | 0.05979 | 100 | 76 | 17 | 7 |
2037 | I heard that people started complaining about the smoke so the board was forced to make changes. | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2038 | Enough Weather Channel already. | 1.3100 | 0.05979 | 100 | 76 | 17 | 7 |
2039 | Well, this is one benefit to the soaring price of oil. | 1.3100 | 0.05449 | 100 | 73 | 23 | 4 |
2040 | The forecast for tonight is extra crispy! | 1.3100 | 0.06146 | 100 | 77 | 15 | 8 |
2041 | So, THIS is hot sex. It's worse than I thought | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2042 | Rumor has it they’re watching Roseanne in heaven. | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2043 | The worst part is there is an ad every 5 minutes. | 1.3100 | 0.06146 | 100 | 77 | 15 | 8 |
2044 | At least it's commercial-free. | 1.3100 | 0.05631 | 100 | 74 | 21 | 5 |
2045 | "Naked and Afraid' is wickedly popular down here. | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2046 | If we want the Super Bowl we have to put up with the local ads. | 1.3100 | 0.05631 | 100 | 74 | 21 | 5 |
2047 | Last time we only had to throw our books in. | 1.3100 | 0.05449 | 100 | 73 | 23 | 4 |
2048 | You wanna Netflix and burn in hell tonight? | 1.3100 | 0.05631 | 100 | 74 | 21 | 5 |
2049 | I sold my soul to cable tv when I was 12. How about you? | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2050 | These YouTube instructional videos really are helpful | 1.3100 | 0.05808 | 100 | 75 | 19 | 6 |
2051 | The people of the United States gathering to watch Trump's State of the Union address | 1.3100 | 0.05631 | 100 | 74 | 21 | 5 |
2052 | This must be Hell. No cable! | 1.3100 | 0.05979 | 100 | 76 | 17 | 7 |
2053 | It's official. Trump is the only person anywhere not trying to reduce carbon emissions. | 1.3086 | 0.06722 | 81 | 62 | 13 | 6 |
2054 | That's why it's called Hell. There's only one channel and only one show. | 1.3085 | 0.05459 | 94 | 68 | 23 | 3 |
2055 | This IS Hell! --3 channels with nothing on. | 1.3085 | 0.06241 | 94 | 72 | 15 | 7 |
2056 | Just what I expected. All commercials. | 1.3077 | 0.05647 | 104 | 78 | 20 | 6 |
2057 | When the commercials come on, they try to sell you Kool-Aid | 1.3077 | 0.05810 | 104 | 79 | 18 | 7 |
2058 | Is Gordon Ramsay going to come out? | 1.3069 | 0.05758 | 101 | 76 | 19 | 6 |
2059 | It's like his soul's not in this anymore. | 1.3069 | 0.06253 | 101 | 79 | 13 | 9 |
2060 | It’s something called Honey Boo Boo. | 1.3069 | 0.05758 | 101 | 76 | 19 | 6 |
2061 | None of us read the fine print on that Amazon Fire stick. | 1.3069 | 0.05758 | 101 | 76 | 19 | 6 |
2062 | All their pants were on fire, and the news covered it. | 1.3069 | 0.05927 | 101 | 77 | 17 | 7 |
2063 | With all that fracking up top, they ran out of things to burn. | 1.3069 | 0.05403 | 101 | 74 | 23 | 4 |
2064 | I find the fake flames kind of tacky, but he says the gas bill was getting out of hand. | 1.3069 | 0.06092 | 101 | 78 | 15 | 8 |
2065 | Climate change, my ass! | 1.3069 | 0.06092 | 101 | 78 | 15 | 8 |
2066 | Reality tv for eternity - my personal hell. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2067 | Try thinking of it as a Yule log, 24/365. | 1.3061 | 0.05311 | 98 | 71 | 24 | 3 |
2068 | This is NOT what it looked like in the brochure... | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2069 | I've already seen this one | 1.3061 | 0.05311 | 98 | 71 | 24 | 3 |
2070 | Beelzebub said it’s to minimize our carbon footprint. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2071 | My lawyer says I'll be out in 3 months. | 1.3061 | 0.05311 | 98 | 71 | 24 | 3 |
2072 | 'You'll burn in hell,' " was a little overstated, wasn't it? | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2073 | Dang! I already saw this one! | 1.3061 | 0.05506 | 98 | 72 | 22 | 4 |
2074 | Apparently Hell doesn't have cable, either. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2075 | I heard they get basic cable in Limbo. | 1.3061 | 0.05311 | 98 | 71 | 24 | 3 |
2076 | My parents warned me there was only one channel down here. | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2077 | I know the guy that directed this. | 1.3061 | 0.05311 | 98 | 71 | 24 | 3 |
2078 | I’m glad we all get together to watch Flame Of Thrones. | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2079 | Hi, I'm Stu. I'm a sagittarius, love cats, and cultural immersion vacations. | 1.3061 | 0.05506 | 98 | 72 | 22 | 4 |
2080 | I really need a hearing aid- I thought she told me to go to Haiti... | 1.3061 | 0.06223 | 98 | 76 | 14 | 8 |
2081 | Grey's Anatomy has gotten ridiculous. | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2082 | The weather report is for continued hot. | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2083 | Hell is a TV with only one channel. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2084 | Rabbit ears! When was the last time you saw rabbit ears! | 1.3061 | 0.05506 | 98 | 72 | 22 | 4 |
2085 | I’ve been to better orientation sessions | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2086 | One channel for eternity? I should have been a better person. | 1.3061 | 0.06223 | 98 | 76 | 14 | 8 |
2087 | No Netflix. Figures. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2088 | Who the H..E.. double hockey sticks died and made this guy lord of the under world? | 1.3061 | 0.05506 | 98 | 72 | 22 | 4 |
2089 | It’s just a fireplace video he’s using while he switches to geothermal. | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2090 | Oh no. It’s that damned Yule log again. | 1.3061 | 0.05109 | 98 | 70 | 26 | 2 |
2091 | You know you're in Hell when you only get one channel on the box. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2092 | Orientation Day video. Ugh! This is gonna be hell. | 1.3061 | 0.04899 | 98 | 69 | 28 | 1 |
2093 | This OSHA safety video is supposed to be 15 minutes long, but it feels like an eternity! | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2094 | Once again, it's going to be a scorcher. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2095 | I'll be damned. It's the Yule Log. | 1.3061 | 0.06052 | 98 | 75 | 16 | 7 |
2096 | Just as I suspected, no remote. | 1.3061 | 0.06223 | 98 | 76 | 14 | 8 |
2097 | Of course I think you're hot...... | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2098 | Ever since the election it’s been too cold to go outside. | 1.3061 | 0.06223 | 98 | 76 | 14 | 8 |
2099 | If I new it was going to be like this I would have been a lot badder. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2100 | These public service announcements are always about fire safety. | 1.3061 | 0.05311 | 98 | 71 | 24 | 3 |
2101 | We call it "Netflix and Burn." | 1.3061 | 0.06052 | 98 | 75 | 16 | 7 |
2102 | It's worse than I imagined... No cable! | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2103 | Apparently they've got flat screens in the other place | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2104 | This program may contain some nudity. | 1.3061 | 0.05506 | 98 | 72 | 22 | 4 |
2105 | I guess this means that hell has finally frozen over, huh? | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2106 | I heard God let’s his souls watch Judge Judy | 1.3061 | 0.06390 | 98 | 77 | 12 | 9 |
2107 | These safety training videos always crack me up | 1.3061 | 0.06390 | 98 | 77 | 12 | 9 |
2108 | Bah...another reality show... | 1.3061 | 0.05506 | 98 | 72 | 22 | 4 |
2109 | Orientation videos - seen one, seen them all... | 1.3061 | 0.06223 | 98 | 76 | 14 | 8 |
2110 | This is where we came in | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2111 | It came down to paying the gas or the cable bill. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2112 | Hell is not having cable and all you get is reruns of the apocalypse. | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2113 | The accommodations are OK, but the reception is lousy. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2114 | And I found out about my eternal damnation via text message. | 1.3061 | 0.06553 | 98 | 78 | 10 | 10 |
2115 | Wow. They're using an Amazon fire stick. | 1.3061 | 0.06390 | 98 | 77 | 12 | 9 |
2116 | We can pick this or Roseanne. | 1.3061 | 0.06052 | 98 | 75 | 16 | 7 |
2117 | Oh cool, I love this show! | 1.3061 | 0.05311 | 98 | 71 | 24 | 3 |
2118 | I would have lived my life differently if I'd known there was no basic cable. | 1.3061 | 0.06223 | 98 | 76 | 14 | 8 |
2119 | OMG, it's worst than I feared, It's black and white only. | 1.3061 | 0.06052 | 98 | 75 | 16 | 7 |
2120 | It's horrid. And they won't let us see the first season. | 1.3061 | 0.05506 | 98 | 72 | 22 | 4 |
2121 | I hear they have cable in heaven. | 1.3061 | 0.06052 | 98 | 75 | 16 | 7 |
2122 | Analog? What kind of hellhole is this?! | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2123 | This must be Heaven... heh heh... boobs. | 1.3061 | 0.06052 | 98 | 75 | 16 | 7 |
2124 | I heard NBC picked up another eternity of this after it got cancelled. | 1.3061 | 0.05311 | 98 | 71 | 24 | 3 |
2125 | Things certainly have changed down here ever since the Cubs won the World Series. | 1.3061 | 0.06052 | 98 | 75 | 16 | 7 |
2126 | Well, at least there aren't any commercials on Hellovision... | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2127 | It reminds me of our honeymoon cruise and the only DVD they had was Titanic. | 1.3061 | 0.04899 | 98 | 69 | 28 | 1 |
2128 | It was on TLC, but we complained. | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2129 | I find his rallies very motivating - if he can get elected president, then any of us can. | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2130 | I love The Real Housewives of Hades | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2131 | Down here, they can only pick up three channels: Fox, Home Shopping Network, and the Yule Log. | 1.3061 | 0.05311 | 98 | 71 | 24 | 3 |
2132 | I'll play the devils advocate and say its the weather channel. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2133 | I still don't understand what this has to do with white privilege. | 1.3061 | 0.06223 | 98 | 76 | 14 | 8 |
2134 | I heard they're cutting down on heating costs | 1.3061 | 0.06390 | 98 | 77 | 12 | 9 |
2135 | These timeshare presentations really are hellish | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2136 | So, hell is having no cable. | 1.3061 | 0.05506 | 98 | 72 | 22 | 4 |
2137 | Hell gets 300 channels and it’s flames on every one of them! | 1.3061 | 0.06052 | 98 | 75 | 16 | 7 |
2138 | It's to reduce their carbon emissions. | 1.3061 | 0.05876 | 98 | 74 | 18 | 6 |
2139 | These timeshare promotions keep getting more intense. | 1.3061 | 0.06052 | 98 | 75 | 16 | 7 |
2140 | Well, at least it's better than watching Fox News | 1.3061 | 0.06553 | 98 | 78 | 10 | 10 |
2141 | Don’t tell him it’s a rerun. | 1.3061 | 0.05694 | 98 | 73 | 20 | 5 |
2142 | It's not as bad as I thought it would be, and yet, it's also kinda worse. | 1.3061 | 0.06223 | 98 | 76 | 14 | 8 |
2143 | I don't know about you, but the laugh track really takes me out of the moment. | 1.3039 | 0.05358 | 102 | 75 | 23 | 4 |
2144 | There are no flatscreens in hell. | 1.3030 | 0.05459 | 99 | 73 | 22 | 4 |
2145 | It is truly hell without cable. | 1.3030 | 0.05998 | 99 | 76 | 16 | 7 |
2146 | I mean, how cheap can you get? | 1.3030 | 0.06168 | 99 | 77 | 14 | 8 |
2147 | Hell is not having a remote. | 1.3030 | 0.05824 | 99 | 75 | 18 | 6 |
2148 | Yeah, but it's a hell of a channel! | 1.3030 | 0.05824 | 99 | 75 | 18 | 6 |
2149 | This is good. I was afraid Bill O’Reilly would be doing orientation. | 1.3030 | 0.05644 | 99 | 74 | 20 | 5 |
2150 | I guess we really are in Hell... they don't even have basic cable. | 1.3030 | 0.05824 | 99 | 75 | 18 | 6 |
2151 | And now,a word from our sponsor. | 1.3030 | 0.05644 | 99 | 74 | 20 | 5 |
2152 | They get 60" flat screens up in Purgatory. | 1.3030 | 0.05824 | 99 | 75 | 18 | 6 |
2153 | Budget Cuts | 1.3030 | 0.05459 | 99 | 73 | 22 | 4 |
2154 | Your AccuWeather forecast says it's going to be hotter than hell today. | 1.3030 | 0.05266 | 99 | 72 | 24 | 3 |
2155 | An "Introduction to Hell" video? What a thoughtful gesture toward us atheists! | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2156 | Now, we just have to watch this quick fire-safety video before we can start all of the fun. | 1.3021 | 0.05364 | 96 | 70 | 23 | 3 |
2157 | These timeshare videos are so boring. | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2158 | He's trying to cut down on CO2 emissions | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2159 | They can't get cable. | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2160 | It would look a lot worse in HD. | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2161 | And, on cable we get The Omen , and , one day per year , we get to watch the Yule Log. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2162 | Well, at least we have the Yule Log channel. | 1.3021 | 0.06304 | 96 | 75 | 13 | 8 |
2163 | Don't complain or he'll put on C-Span. | 1.3021 | 0.05565 | 96 | 71 | 21 | 4 |
2164 | OH HECK! | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2165 | Oh no! It's another Trump rally! | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2166 | This is the first circle. Second circle, Home Shopping Network. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2167 | I produced “Project Runway”. You? | 1.3021 | 0.06475 | 96 | 76 | 11 | 9 |
2168 | It kinda reminds me of the Yule Log we used to watch on Christmas Eve. | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2169 | He always shows his vacation videos at this time of year. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2170 | This is the special hell for baby boomers. | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
2171 | You think this is punishing? Wait until the car insurance commercials start. | 1.3021 | 0.05565 | 96 | 71 | 21 | 4 |
2172 | Next, they will tell us it is freezing over! | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
2173 | There's a lower level for advanced sinners. Down there they show non-stop commercials. | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2174 | It's not the heat, it's the humidity | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2175 | If I knew we wouldn't have HD, I would've paid more attention to those commandments... | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2176 | It's probably a lot more effective in the theater in IMAX with multi-channel sound and big subwoofers. | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
2177 | It's fake torment. | 1.3021 | 0.05364 | 96 | 70 | 23 | 3 |
2178 | We lucked out, channel 56 is showing penguins walking on their own excrement. | 1.3021 | 0.06304 | 96 | 75 | 13 | 8 |
2179 | At least we have VHF. | 1.3021 | 0.05364 | 96 | 70 | 23 | 3 |
2180 | 200 channels and nothing on. | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
2181 | It's a cost-cutting measure. The price of burning sulfur has gone thru the.. whatever they have here for a roof. | 1.3021 | 0.05565 | 96 | 71 | 21 | 4 |
2182 | This is a short preview of your ultimate destination. | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
2183 | “I hear they’re having trouble making a sequel because this one’s eternal. | 1.3021 | 0.06475 | 96 | 76 | 11 | 9 |
2184 | Of course, the worst part are the commercials. | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2185 | Damn, it's the Yule Log. | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
2186 | It's going to be hell down here without cable. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2187 | He’s calling this reality TV | 1.3021 | 0.05565 | 96 | 71 | 21 | 4 |
2188 | You'd think it would at least be in colour. | 1.3021 | 0.05565 | 96 | 71 | 21 | 4 |
2189 | No, it's just like heaven here, but without cable. | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2190 | This movie goes on forever. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2191 | You can literally feel the heat, can't you? | 1.3021 | 0.05565 | 96 | 71 | 21 | 4 |
2192 | It beats watching FOX. | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
2193 | I hope this first date isn't moving too fast for you. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2194 | Analog TV? We really ARE in hell! | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2195 | It's virtually hell | 1.3021 | 0.05364 | 96 | 70 | 23 | 3 |
2196 | I guess you know you're in hell when you realize you've avoided every opportunity to look good naked, and this is the result. That, and there's only one channel... | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2197 | Don't let the hot flames get to you, after midnight we get snow. | 1.3021 | 0.05565 | 96 | 71 | 21 | 4 |
2198 | It's not even in HD! Now I know what hell is! | 1.3021 | 0.05364 | 96 | 70 | 23 | 3 |
2199 | It's pledge week. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2200 | We thought it was going to be in color. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2201 | Looks like a lot of people went through hell to get into this program. | 1.3021 | 0.05364 | 96 | 70 | 23 | 3 |
2202 | Real Housewives of Hell is on next | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2203 | Relax, it’s a nudist colony. What the hell can go wrong? | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2204 | Same old hellfire, brimstone and eternal damnation. Nothing but reruns again. | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
2205 | Yes, but after we learned they only get C-SPAN in the other place, no one really complains here anymore. | 1.3021 | 0.05364 | 96 | 70 | 23 | 3 |
2206 | Welcome to Heck. | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
2207 | I bet heaven is just as over-hyped. | 1.3021 | 0.05364 | 96 | 70 | 23 | 3 |
2208 | At least, there are no commercials. That would be torture. | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2209 | I so hate it when the trailer reveals all the best scenes. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2210 | As a loyal viewer of Fox & Friends, how bad can it be? | 1.3021 | 0.05565 | 96 | 71 | 21 | 4 |
2211 | The real hell is watching the ads before the video starts. | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2212 | I would have been a better person if I'd known hell was an eternity without streaming and only one local channel to watch. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2213 | I can't believe we lost the remote | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2214 | No one here has ever paid for Netflix. | 1.3021 | 0.06127 | 96 | 74 | 15 | 7 |
2215 | You'd better wake up Donald. Fox & Friends is about to start. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2216 | Eternal flames I could take, but eternal re-runs? | 1.3021 | 0.05946 | 96 | 73 | 17 | 6 |
2217 | No 4K 80 inch flat screen? This really is Hell. | 1.3021 | 0.05758 | 96 | 72 | 19 | 5 |
2218 | What will burn our eyes is this old screen resolution. | 1.3021 | 0.05565 | 96 | 71 | 21 | 4 |
2219 | Break's over. Back to Fox News. | 1.3000 | 0.05795 | 90 | 67 | 19 | 4 |
2220 | You'd think he could afford an HDTV. | 1.2990 | 0.06072 | 97 | 75 | 15 | 7 |
2221 | Here we go with another episode of Satan’s Got Talent. | 1.2990 | 0.06072 | 97 | 75 | 15 | 7 |
2222 | Looks like we have the correct attire! | 1.2990 | 0.05516 | 97 | 72 | 21 | 4 |
2223 | I hope it warms up after orientation! | 1.2990 | 0.05707 | 97 | 73 | 19 | 5 |
2224 | Has anyone tried adjusting the brightness control? | 1.2990 | 0.05317 | 97 | 71 | 23 | 3 |
2225 | I can’t remember. Is it a virtual or literal hell in here? | 1.2990 | 0.05707 | 97 | 73 | 19 | 5 |
2226 | This isn't the Disco Inferno I was expecting. | 1.2990 | 0.05892 | 97 | 74 | 17 | 6 |
2227 | Is this virtual reality? | 1.2990 | 0.05707 | 97 | 73 | 19 | 5 |
2228 | Who knew the budget cuts would reach these depths? | 1.2990 | 0.05892 | 97 | 74 | 17 | 6 |
2229 | What? One channel...one program...!?! This IS pure hell! | 1.2990 | 0.05317 | 97 | 71 | 23 | 3 |
2230 | They said it would be just like we were there... | 1.2990 | 0.05516 | 97 | 72 | 21 | 4 |
2231 | I've heard it gets better in season two. | 1.2990 | 0.05516 | 97 | 72 | 21 | 4 |
2232 | Welcome to virtual hell. | 1.2990 | 0.05516 | 97 | 72 | 21 | 4 |
2233 | Hell of a show. | 1.2990 | 0.05516 | 97 | 72 | 21 | 4 |
2234 | Breaking news, my ass. | 1.2990 | 0.05892 | 97 | 74 | 17 | 6 |
2235 | This isn't even the worst part. They don't have free wifi. | 1.2990 | 0.05892 | 97 | 74 | 17 | 6 |
2236 | Fake news - they didn't get the climate change update - hell WILL be freezing over. | 1.2990 | 0.05892 | 97 | 74 | 17 | 6 |
2237 | I never thought I would say this, but let's get dressed and find cable. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2238 | You’d expect Lucifer to have cable. | 1.2979 | 0.05418 | 94 | 69 | 22 | 3 |
2239 | And yet no one cares the TSA has gone this far. | 1.2979 | 0.05418 | 94 | 69 | 22 | 3 |
2240 | I wish he would get to the brimstone channel already. | 1.2979 | 0.04978 | 94 | 67 | 26 | 1 |
2241 | When Amazon asked me to test its Fire TV, this isn't what I had in mind. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2242 | Trust me, this beats the Kardashians. | 1.2979 | 0.06387 | 94 | 74 | 12 | 8 |
2243 | This is what's waiting for Fox News. | 1.2979 | 0.06563 | 94 | 75 | 10 | 9 |
2244 | In Heaven they have flat screens and videos of clouds. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2245 | He’s obviously never been to Burning Man. | 1.2979 | 0.06205 | 94 | 73 | 14 | 7 |
2246 | And I thought cable was hell. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2247 | I wish I had known about the seven-hour orientation before I pulled the trigger. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2248 | Furnace went down so we’re forced to binge watch. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2249 | The TV reception is better than we had at the White House. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2250 | Actually, I'm not sure which is worse | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2251 | I was bad in a conventional sort of way, but if I had known that the whole fire and brimstone thing would be televised and not real, I think I would have pushed my badness factor way beyond conventional. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2252 | It’s an economy package, just Fox and the other local channels. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2253 | You think in hell we'd at least get a flat screen | 1.2979 | 0.06205 | 94 | 73 | 14 | 7 |
2254 | I’m just here for the free buffet. | 1.2979 | 0.06387 | 94 | 74 | 12 | 8 |
2255 | I'm sorta enjoying this. | 1.2979 | 0.05625 | 94 | 70 | 20 | 4 |
2256 | They were right about hell but embarrassingly wrong about the fire. | 1.2979 | 0.06387 | 94 | 74 | 12 | 8 |
2257 | Who knew budget cuts would have a plus side. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2258 | I always said 'hell is not being able to change the channel on a rerun.' | 1.2979 | 0.05202 | 94 | 68 | 24 | 2 |
2259 | He’s hitting all the targets now for reduced emissions. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2260 | Lacks verisimilitude. | 1.2979 | 0.05625 | 94 | 70 | 20 | 4 |
2261 | I was told we'd be watching "The Naked and the Dead." | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2262 | Great! I love coming attractions. | 1.2979 | 0.05418 | 94 | 69 | 22 | 3 |
2263 | And mom said,"Be sure to wear clean underwear!" | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2264 | Thank God that I don't see my parents - and that we get Fox News down here. | 1.2979 | 0.05625 | 94 | 70 | 20 | 4 |
2265 | It just hasn't been the same since the budget cuts | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2266 | The real hell is having to deal with rabbit ears again. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2267 | Slow tv, a homogenous crowd, liberal nudity? I swear, it used to be heavenly to be Danish. | 1.2979 | 0.06387 | 94 | 74 | 12 | 8 |
2268 | It's okay, but the book was better. | 1.2979 | 0.06205 | 94 | 73 | 14 | 7 |
2269 | What the hell are we watching tonight? | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2270 | This orientation video is kinda depressing. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2271 | I guess Satan is trying to reduce his carbon hoofprint. | 1.2979 | 0.05625 | 94 | 70 | 20 | 4 |
2272 | You don't realize how much you miss high-definition until you don't have it. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2273 | This is the part where fire burns for eternity. Spoiler alert. | 1.2979 | 0.05202 | 94 | 68 | 24 | 2 |
2274 | I told you they don't have cable. | 1.2979 | 0.06205 | 94 | 73 | 14 | 7 |
2275 | I'm not sure this orientation video is necessary. | 1.2979 | 0.05418 | 94 | 69 | 22 | 3 |
2276 | Like drinking hot tea in summer - it'll make you feel cooler. | 1.2979 | 0.04978 | 94 | 67 | 26 | 1 |
2277 | Baby Boomers don't need to experience the real thing -- they find that televised flames are just as effective. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2278 | This must be that cold day in hell that my wife kept talking about. | 1.2979 | 0.06205 | 94 | 73 | 14 | 7 |
2279 | He calls it reality TV. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2280 | It's like that classic Yule log fireplace program - only with more torture. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2281 | There's no choice. All programs are titled Burn in Hell. | 1.2979 | 0.06205 | 94 | 73 | 14 | 7 |
2282 | I understand they have HDTVs in heaven. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2283 | Who died and made him God? | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2284 | It minimizes our carbon footprint. | 1.2979 | 0.05418 | 94 | 69 | 22 | 3 |
2285 | I don't know why, but watching the evening news always depresses me. | 1.2979 | 0.06205 | 94 | 73 | 14 | 7 |
2286 | We are doomed to watch the Christmas log for eternity! | 1.2979 | 0.06563 | 94 | 75 | 10 | 9 |
2287 | Thank heavens, there are no commercials! | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2288 | We've been acquired by Sinclair. | 1.2979 | 0.06205 | 94 | 73 | 14 | 7 |
2289 | It's Sean Hannity's new graphic. | 1.2979 | 0.05418 | 94 | 69 | 22 | 3 |
2290 | Scary stuff, but Shark Week is coming in 2 days. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2291 | Broadcast? Non-HD? This IS Hell. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2292 | Rabbit ears? Seriously? | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2293 | Why do they bother? Does anyone actually watch TV in the waiting room? | 1.2979 | 0.05625 | 94 | 70 | 20 | 4 |
2294 | It's a rerun. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2295 | It was either this or The Disney Channel. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2296 | They start with the fire. Then the fury. But its all rather derivative. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2297 | I always seem to be in the overflow crowd. | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2298 | Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Fox News, and Trump's tweets...this is hell! | 1.2979 | 0.06018 | 94 | 72 | 16 | 6 |
2299 | World's on fire, let's watch TV | 1.2979 | 0.06205 | 94 | 73 | 14 | 7 |
2300 | Sure the last resort had cable, but this place seems more upfront about the costs. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2301 | That’s one hell of a show. | 1.2979 | 0.05825 | 94 | 71 | 18 | 5 |
2302 | Fox’s fake flames. | 1.2979 | 0.06205 | 94 | 73 | 14 | 7 |
2303 | Now what do we do for fun? The TV’s gone to hell! | 1.2959 | 0.05468 | 98 | 73 | 21 | 4 |
2304 | I wasn't expecting a full display of the nether regions. | 1.2959 | 0.06190 | 98 | 77 | 13 | 8 |
2305 | Next time we Netflix and chill. | 1.2949 | 0.07093 | 78 | 62 | 9 | 7 |
2306 | Who would ever think that eating one apple could cause all of this? | 1.2947 | 0.05574 | 95 | 71 | 20 | 4 |
2307 | This is where people go who complain about cable. | 1.2947 | 0.05370 | 95 | 70 | 22 | 3 |
2308 | Guessing we shouldn’t ask about broadband. | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
2309 | This must be Hell, they're making us watch on an analog TV. | 1.2947 | 0.05574 | 95 | 71 | 20 | 4 |
2310 | I believe he said we will have to watch Fox News all day. | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
2311 | Apparently all these fires were releasing a lot of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. | 1.2947 | 0.06147 | 95 | 74 | 14 | 7 |
2312 | After the video, want to get out of here and have a drink? | 1.2947 | 0.05772 | 95 | 72 | 18 | 5 |
2313 | Let's get the hell out of here | 1.2947 | 0.06147 | 95 | 74 | 14 | 7 |
2314 | I hear this show just got picked up for another eternity of seasons. | 1.2947 | 0.05962 | 95 | 73 | 16 | 6 |
2315 | Whenever Paul Ryan's on they call us up here to watch | 1.2947 | 0.06147 | 95 | 74 | 14 | 7 |
2316 | Who knew that eternity too was virtual? | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2317 | Is that it? | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2318 | When I said my idea of hell is not having a flat panel HDTV, I did not realize this would be taken so literally... | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2319 | It's the same on every channel. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2320 | Sure as hell he's not forking over for cable. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2321 | It should be cooler when we get there, they say that television adds 20 degrees. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2322 | I remember when there was fire everywhere and a Hershey's Bar only cost a nickel! | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2323 | A cost savings move by Corporate. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2324 | Agreed, its not much on ambiance but so much better for air quality. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2325 | See everyone wants to be a director,...don’t say anything but he’s no Hitchcock. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2326 | I still only hear 'Laurel.' | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2327 | When you live with millions of accountants, sooner or later you're going to make cuts. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2328 | We can't complain too much. At least they have an Amazon fire stick. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2329 | we are, after all, genetically programmed to gather round the fire. | 1.2935 | 0.05473 | 92 | 68 | 21 | 3 |
2330 | Looks like limbo isn't so bad at all. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2331 | That may be so, but wait until they realize it’s on an infinite loop. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2332 | I know he's famous for "YOU'RE FIRED", but I never thought he really meant "GO TO HELL." | 1.2935 | 0.06286 | 92 | 72 | 13 | 7 |
2333 | Eternal reruns of the Trump presidency, it's the new hell. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2334 | I’m really getting tired of porn. Let’s toast some marshmellows. | 1.2935 | 0.06286 | 92 | 72 | 13 | 7 |
2335 | Did they say what time the Yankee's game starts? | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2336 | I'm so tired of reality television | 1.2935 | 0.06286 | 92 | 72 | 13 | 7 |
2337 | These are vanity glasses. I can see just fine. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2338 | Orientation is hell. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2339 | Is it just me or is it warm in here? | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2340 | I told you, it's non-stop fake news. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2341 | Hard to believe rabbit ears work here. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2342 | I'd really like to twist those knobs one last time. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2343 | The power of suggestion is not working. I still feel chilled. | 1.2935 | 0.05473 | 92 | 68 | 21 | 3 |
2344 | Everlasting fire just became too resource-intensive. | 1.2935 | 0.06473 | 92 | 73 | 11 | 8 |
2345 | Funny thing is, it totally dominates its time slot. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2346 | For the holidays he throws in a Yule log. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2347 | If I knew it was going to be like this, my life on earth would have been a lot rowdier. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2348 | It’s okay in December, otherwise the Yule Log gets old fast. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2349 | It's his answer to the Yule log! | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2350 | The programming has really gone to hell. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2351 | It's endless and lacks passion, but as adaptations go, I've seen worse. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2352 | I hear the cable guy is going to hook us up between 'abandon hope' and 'never.' | 1.2935 | 0.05473 | 92 | 68 | 21 | 3 |
2353 | Looks like the Devil got the hell taxed out of him, too. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2354 | I've already seen this one on my hand-held. It goes on for an eternity! | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2355 | I always enjoy it when Lucifer explores his more conceptual side. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2356 | He loves sharing his holiday videos. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2357 | . . . and not enough eternal tormentors either. I don't think they were counting on the number of congressmen. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2358 | Only one channel? This really is torture! | 1.2935 | 0.05473 | 92 | 68 | 21 | 3 |
2359 | My dry cleaner and cable provider are already here. | 1.2935 | 0.06473 | 92 | 73 | 11 | 8 |
2360 | Can you believe those rabbit ears get a signal down here? | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2361 | I"m waiting to see what Fox News has to say about the temperature today. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2362 | I kind of like this virtual reality stuff. | 1.2935 | 0.05017 | 92 | 66 | 25 | 1 |
2363 | I expected the content to be a little more racy. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2364 | Don't worry its just a bad dream. There's no way in Hell they could get that good a picture with just rabbit ears. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2365 | It's hell not having a remote! | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2366 | Poor bastard put his fire and brimstone money into Bitcoin. | 1.2935 | 0.06286 | 92 | 72 | 13 | 7 |
2367 | This is Hell. No Wi-Fi. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2368 | It's my first time here so I'm actually going to find this video pretty informative. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2369 | This was absolutely state of the art a few decades before any of us were born. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2370 | We watch this for six months then they show Brimstone | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2371 | Hell of a timeshare pitch, eh? | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2372 | I guess we've made it to 'a kinder, gentler' level of Hell. | 1.2935 | 0.05473 | 92 | 68 | 21 | 3 |
2373 | This is so much better than the real thing. | 1.2935 | 0.06286 | 92 | 72 | 13 | 7 |
2374 | Seriously, do we all really think the weather for tomorrow will be any different? | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2375 | Apparently all performance artists end up in this place. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2376 | If you prefer reality TV to PBS, this is the place for you. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2377 | Frankly, I think the parties have declined with Hef gone | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2378 | ¨This reminds me of a bender of sorts I had in college¨ | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2379 | I think we picked the wrong door. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2380 | Don't you feel that this infomercial last an eternity? | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2381 | Actually, I'm not in that much of a rush to get into the main chamber. | 1.2935 | 0.05687 | 92 | 69 | 19 | 4 |
2382 | Do you come here often ? | 1.2935 | 0.06286 | 92 | 72 | 13 | 7 |
2383 | It may not be "fair and balanced" but at least it isn't fake news. | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2384 | Today’s temperature is heating up to a high of “Hot As Hell” | 1.2935 | 0.05473 | 92 | 68 | 21 | 3 |
2385 | And the worst is, they only show Fox News ! | 1.2935 | 0.06093 | 92 | 71 | 15 | 6 |
2386 | What made you decide to audition for 'Naked and Afraid' ? | 1.2935 | 0.06286 | 92 | 72 | 13 | 7 |
2387 | Not another episode of As the World Burns- can’t we at least have cable. | 1.2935 | 0.05893 | 92 | 70 | 17 | 5 |
2388 | Everything went to hell after they repealed net neutrality. | 1.2903 | 0.06035 | 93 | 72 | 15 | 6 |
2389 | Rumor has it in the 9th circle they get Fox News. | 1.2903 | 0.05634 | 93 | 70 | 19 | 4 |
2390 | I have no idea why he's using a 1950s video of a Yule Log instead of his usual real fire. You'll have to ask him about that. After all, the details are in the Devil. | 1.2903 | 0.06226 | 93 | 73 | 13 | 7 |
2391 | Oh, that... yeah, well they’re trying something new - televised flames are more energy efficient. | 1.2903 | 0.05838 | 93 | 71 | 17 | 5 |
2392 | I guess the building doesn't allow open flames anymore. | 1.2903 | 0.06035 | 93 | 72 | 15 | 6 |
2393 | It's the rerun from "Hell." | 1.2903 | 0.05838 | 93 | 71 | 17 | 5 |
2394 | EPA shut 'em down; excessive emissions | 1.2903 | 0.06226 | 93 | 73 | 13 | 7 |
2395 | Does he know this increases our chance of freezing over? | 1.2903 | 0.06035 | 93 | 72 | 15 | 6 |
2396 | I never thought global warming would lead to this. | 1.2903 | 0.05838 | 93 | 71 | 17 | 5 |
2397 | The State of the Union speech is on next. | 1.2903 | 0.05838 | 93 | 71 | 17 | 5 |
2398 | Quit complaining. At least it's not the Fox New Channel. | 1.2903 | 0.06411 | 93 | 74 | 11 | 8 |
2399 | Did you watch the Royal wedding? | 1.2903 | 0.05838 | 93 | 71 | 17 | 5 |
2400 | A virtual hellfire to cut down on carbon emissions - maybe this is environmentalist heaven. | 1.2903 | 0.06411 | 93 | 74 | 11 | 8 |
2401 | Orientation videos are always the real hell. | 1.2903 | 0.05634 | 93 | 70 | 19 | 4 |
2402 | what the hell is this? | 1.2903 | 0.06035 | 93 | 72 | 15 | 6 |
2403 | It's either this or brimstone. | 1.2903 | 0.06035 | 93 | 72 | 15 | 6 |
2404 | These budget cuts are getting out of hand. | 1.2903 | 0.06035 | 93 | 72 | 15 | 6 |
2405 | Welcome to the midterm elections! | 1.2903 | 0.05838 | 93 | 71 | 17 | 5 |
2406 | Sure, the reality TV is always hell to watch, but not ever having to deal with the cable company makes it seem like heaven. | 1.2903 | 0.06035 | 93 | 72 | 15 | 6 |
2407 | The heaven channel has a lot less screaming. | 1.2903 | 0.05634 | 93 | 70 | 19 | 4 |
2408 | It's time for 'What Not To Wear' | 1.2903 | 0.05838 | 93 | 71 | 17 | 5 |
2409 | I was really hoping for, ‘The Devil in Miss Jones.’ | 1.2903 | 0.06035 | 93 | 72 | 15 | 6 |
2410 | It just got picked up for another billion seasons. | 1.2903 | 0.05634 | 93 | 70 | 19 | 4 |
2411 | I think you're really hot, but then again, I guess we'll all be soon. | 1.2903 | 0.06035 | 93 | 72 | 15 | 6 |
2412 | Nah. No fires. Fake News. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2413 | Are you here for sexual assault too? | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2414 | Look on the bright side. At least it’s not the Sean Hannity Show. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2415 | I was a media mogul, so yes,... I take this personally. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2416 | It's still better than reading a book. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2417 | The suspense is killing me. Again. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2418 | During the holidays he plays a brightly burning but festive Yule log. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2419 | On the bright side, it is better to watch a virtual reality fire, than be in one for all of eternity. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2420 | It's turning into a really cold day in hell. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2421 | Lookit all the tits! I’m in heaven! | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2422 | What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this? | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2423 | I’m surprised the devil doesn’t have cable | 1.2889 | 0.05529 | 90 | 67 | 20 | 3 |
2424 | This isn’t so bad. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2425 | Nooooo! Not reality TV! | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2426 | No flat screen or cable bothers me more than being naked. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2427 | I'll watch the safety video, but I am not signing the release waiver. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2428 | Is someone going to tell him we won’t burn in hell this way? | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2429 | Kilauea. It's their favorite program down here. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2430 | The heating bills were out of control. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2431 | Netflix and brimstone? | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2432 | I think it is clear. You vote for some Democrat clown you burn in hell!! | 1.2889 | 0.06369 | 90 | 71 | 12 | 7 |
2433 | I appreciate the orientation. I hate surprises. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2434 | State media. | 1.2889 | 0.05529 | 90 | 67 | 20 | 3 |
2435 | Theoretically I understand why people think its demeaning, but a person only gets so many opportunities to work for the White House. Am I right? | 1.2889 | 0.06369 | 90 | 71 | 12 | 7 |
2436 | Since Pope Fancis came along, the fires of Hell just haven’t been the same. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2437 | The Weather report looks like another hot day. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2438 | I'm guessing there's only one channel. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2439 | I've always been more sensitive to cold compared to everyone else, that's all | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2440 | Hellfire, hellfire. Yada, yada, yada. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2441 | Somehow, I thought it would be a little more realistic. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2442 | Dante's 10th Circle for Millennials: 20th century TV with antenna | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2443 | At noon they turn on the Big Bang Theory. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2444 | I guess this is what we get for not reading our cable companies user agreement | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2445 | The worst timeshare pitch ever. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2446 | I always expected fire and brimstone to be a bit more scary and at least in HD | 1.2889 | 0.06749 | 90 | 73 | 8 | 9 |
2447 | Maybe the overflow room wasn't such a bad idea. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2448 | Hey, I thought you said we weren't going to have to stand though the timeshare pitch? | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2449 | This is only season 1, episode 1,283,426,735 | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2450 | Our new zero-emissions heating system | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2451 | These fake fires just don't have the feel of the real thing. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2452 | At least we're dressed properly. | 1.2889 | 0.06369 | 90 | 71 | 12 | 7 |
2453 | Don't you just hate being having to be exposed to these orientation videos? | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2454 | The punishment gets worse. It's soap operas in the afternoon. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2455 | I told you it was “Fox”. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2456 | God forbid he ever changes the channel. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2457 | It's supposed to be a brief presentation, then we can go tour the hot tub | 1.2889 | 0.05529 | 90 | 67 | 20 | 3 |
2458 | Well, I'd say it's kind of got a retro, 'Make Hell Malevolent Again', vibe going for it! | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2459 | Could be worse — over in the 9th ring they make them watch C-SPAN. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2460 | The last thing I was expecting was a health and safety video! | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2461 | That’s where our clothes went! | 1.2889 | 0.06369 | 90 | 71 | 12 | 7 |
2462 | Its his way of upgrading you to Satan Prime. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2463 | It’s hard to tell the fire from the brimstone in standard definition. | 1.2889 | 0.05299 | 90 | 66 | 22 | 2 |
2464 | '"You're fired!' really means something down here." | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2465 | I hear they have a flatscreen up in circle three. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2466 | Is it upside down? Or not? Take your time. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2467 | Could have been worse. We could have been forced to watch repeat episodes of Touched by an Angel. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2468 | We’ve been getting flack for our excesdive carbon footprint. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2469 | I'm glad we get Fox News down here. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2470 | He likes to torture us with reality tv. | 1.2889 | 0.06369 | 90 | 71 | 12 | 7 |
2471 | The scriptwriters have totally run out of ideas. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2472 | The fireplace channel is all that's available. It's Hell! | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2473 | I guess he's finally concerned about global warming | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2474 | This nudist retreat might have been a bad idea... | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2475 | No fires today- it's a spare the air day. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2476 | The true hell is the picture quality. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2477 | Quite! Our ruler... the Emperor With No Clothes. is speaking.... " Fire and Fury " | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2478 | I hear that in heaven they get to watch everything on a 60" flat screen! | 1.2889 | 0.05058 | 90 | 65 | 24 | 1 |
2479 | Rabbit ears and the Christmas fireplace; Hell is so dated! | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2480 | I think the timeshare in Orlando was a better deal. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2481 | I heard he got the idea from that 'Burning Yule Log' video. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2482 | Tits and TV.. you call this hell?! | 1.2889 | 0.06562 | 90 | 72 | 10 | 8 |
2483 | I don't know Martha, I've seen just as much of this show as you have | 1.2889 | 0.05529 | 90 | 67 | 20 | 3 |
2484 | I liked the holiday fireplace one better. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2485 | I miss the Winter Olympics | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2486 | I'm starting to think that Satan doesn't value us as customers. | 1.2889 | 0.05529 | 90 | 67 | 20 | 3 |
2487 | Don't know about you, but this bores the hell outta me. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2488 | I hate flying out of LaGuardia. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2489 | Every channel is Breaking News. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2490 | Another lie perpetuated by Fox News. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2491 | We do apologize for the inconvenience but are experiencing technical difficulties. Thank you for your patience. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2492 | This is Hell. Did you expect a flat-screen TV? | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2493 | I wish we got Sin-a-max. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2494 | The worst part is we have to wait a year for season two. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2495 | The next hour is going to be psoriasis treatment ads. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2496 | These orgies are getting a little too avant garde for my taste. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2497 | He puts it on every Christmas. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2498 | Were you expecting high-def? | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2499 | Don't go anywhere, Charlie's Fallen Angels is on at 8. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2500 | Just think of it as binge watching the Yule Log. Forever. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2501 | Do you ever take a moment and reflect on how you ended up here? | 1.2889 | 0.05529 | 90 | 67 | 20 | 3 |
2502 | eternal damnation without cable? | 1.2889 | 0.05529 | 90 | 67 | 20 | 3 |
2503 | I'm seeing a tremendous opportunity to modernize the tech down here. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2504 | I hear that Harvey Weinstein and Bill Cosby are the guests of honor at tonight's screening. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2505 | Live from New York, it's Saturday Night. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2506 | I guess I was wrong Sharon. It looks like climate change really does effect everyone after all. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2507 | I hate sweeps week! | 1.2889 | 0.05299 | 90 | 66 | 22 | 2 |
2508 | This is what we get for spreading fake nudes. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2509 | I liked it better in theaters. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2510 | Analog TV? This IS Hell... | 1.2889 | 0.06369 | 90 | 71 | 12 | 7 |
2511 | Wanna fuck? | 1.2889 | 0.06369 | 90 | 71 | 12 | 7 |
2512 | In heaven, it’s the oscillating fan. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2513 | It's only that damn hemerrhoid infomercial! | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2514 | They said that after we watch the intro video, we get a tour of the timeshare properties. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2515 | Is that a live feed from the 7th ring of hell? | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2516 | This is hell, no cable! | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2517 | When they asked, "Cloths or T.V.?", it was a no-brainer. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2518 | I'm not worried, if this were really hell, CNN would be on the TV. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2519 | This year's Burning Man is lame. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2520 | And I couldn't even get a signal in my basement. | 1.2889 | 0.06562 | 90 | 72 | 10 | 8 |
2521 | Thank God we're just in the overflow room. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2522 | It's never as nice as they show you in the previews. | 1.2889 | 0.05529 | 90 | 67 | 20 | 3 |
2523 | Let's hope no one tells him about virtual reality. | 1.2889 | 0.05964 | 90 | 69 | 16 | 5 |
2524 | Oh god, not another rerun! | 1.2889 | 0.05529 | 90 | 67 | 20 | 3 |
2525 | I told you the earth was warming. | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2526 | Imagine the fun we could have if we weren't dead. | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2527 | Production value here has really gone to hell. | 1.2889 | 0.05299 | 90 | 66 | 22 | 2 |
2528 | This reality television stuff is just killing me. | 1.2889 | 0.06369 | 90 | 71 | 12 | 7 |
2529 | It's a virtual Hell! | 1.2889 | 0.06170 | 90 | 70 | 14 | 6 |
2530 | Better than Fox or CNN... | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2531 | I know it's hell, but it's a dry heat!! | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2532 | This is the same training video that I saw at Trump University. | 1.2889 | 0.06369 | 90 | 71 | 12 | 7 |
2533 | Is this the casting call for Stormy Daniel's "Fire Down Below"? | 1.2889 | 0.05299 | 90 | 66 | 22 | 2 |
2534 | EP of Wife Swap. You? | 1.2889 | 0.05751 | 90 | 68 | 18 | 4 |
2535 | It doesn't look so scary when its not high definition. | 1.2872 | 0.05583 | 94 | 71 | 19 | 4 |
2536 | Nothing is more sinful than watching "Hell's got Talent" | 1.2872 | 0.05978 | 94 | 73 | 15 | 6 |
2537 | Sure, we got 500 channels, but they're all the same! | 1.2872 | 0.05978 | 94 | 73 | 15 | 6 |
2538 | Reception was better in the second ring. | 1.2872 | 0.06167 | 94 | 74 | 13 | 7 |
2539 | Hell is reality TV. | 1.2857 | 0.06306 | 91 | 72 | 12 | 7 |
2540 | Infernal contraption! | 1.2857 | 0.05906 | 91 | 70 | 16 | 5 |
2541 | If we're going to be here for all eternity, can we at least get a flat screen? | 1.2857 | 0.05906 | 91 | 70 | 16 | 5 |
2542 | Strangely overlooked in the classical literature, sexual harassment training takes place at the entrance to the Second Circle of Hell. | 1.2857 | 0.06497 | 91 | 73 | 10 | 8 |
2543 | Do you think this could possibly be fake news? | 1.2857 | 0.06110 | 91 | 71 | 14 | 6 |
2544 | Oh, Hell. Reruns again! | 1.2857 | 0.05250 | 91 | 67 | 22 | 2 |
2545 | The next season comes out in one hundred million years. | 1.2857 | 0.06306 | 91 | 72 | 12 | 7 |
2546 | In heaven, they watch the Yule log. | 1.2857 | 0.06110 | 91 | 71 | 14 | 6 |
2547 | Hell or daytime TV - tough choice! | 1.2857 | 0.05477 | 91 | 68 | 20 | 3 |
2548 | „Not being able to change channels has proven to be much more hellish than actual hellfire.“ | 1.2857 | 0.05696 | 91 | 69 | 18 | 4 |
2549 | The true Hell is that aspect ratio. | 1.2857 | 0.06110 | 91 | 71 | 14 | 6 |
2550 | I heard they serve burnt popcorn. | 1.2857 | 0.05906 | 91 | 70 | 16 | 5 |
2551 | I remember watching the pilot | 1.2857 | 0.05906 | 91 | 70 | 16 | 5 |
2552 | 'If you wanted to see the final episode, you should have gone to heaven!' | 1.2857 | 0.05477 | 91 | 68 | 20 | 3 |
2553 | So I guess WAS wrong to peddle all those subprime mortgages | 1.2842 | 0.05325 | 95 | 71 | 21 | 3 |
2554 | This must be alternative hell. | 1.2842 | 0.05731 | 95 | 73 | 17 | 5 |
2555 | Apparently, this cuts our CO2 emissions in half. | 1.2842 | 0.06290 | 95 | 76 | 11 | 8 |
2556 | So what network did you work for up there? | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2557 | I guess I should have read their early termination clause more closely. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2558 | Welcome to Millennial Hell | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2559 | This must be the "teaser." | 1.2841 | 0.05587 | 88 | 66 | 19 | 3 |
2560 | Jeez, I can't wait for the season finale." | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2561 | Did you remember to bring the sun block? | 1.2841 | 0.05587 | 88 | 66 | 19 | 3 |
2562 | It's like "The Sopranos" - nobody knows how it really ends! | 1.2841 | 0.05098 | 88 | 64 | 23 | 1 |
2563 | And this circle of hell is exclusively for people who lied on their Tinder profile. | 1.2841 | 0.05098 | 88 | 64 | 23 | 1 |
2564 | Safety orientation | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2565 | It's not even in HD. | 1.2841 | 0.05587 | 88 | 66 | 19 | 3 |
2566 | I hear it's a public service announcement about how the climate is changing down here too. | 1.2841 | 0.06455 | 88 | 70 | 11 | 7 |
2567 | Who knew the cable company would be this pissed when we cut the cord? | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2568 | New TSA procedures? At least we get to keep our shoes on. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2569 | Being stuck here with antenna TV sure is hell. | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2570 | You are doomed to an eternity of watching FOX NEWS! | 1.2841 | 0.06654 | 88 | 71 | 9 | 8 |
2571 | You are so hot. | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2572 | Always the Weather Channel with this guy. | 1.2841 | 0.05587 | 88 | 66 | 19 | 3 |
2573 | So this is it? | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2574 | There's only one bloody hell channel down here. | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2575 | Let's poke his eyes out with the antenna. We have nothing to lose. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2576 | Hell, no cable | 1.2841 | 0.05348 | 88 | 65 | 21 | 2 |
2577 | When they told me Hell was being forced to watch Bonanza reruns forever I didn't believe it." | 1.2841 | 0.05587 | 88 | 66 | 19 | 3 |
2578 | gone are the days when they had actual demons doing the induction to hell. | 1.2841 | 0.05348 | 88 | 65 | 21 | 2 |
2579 | I feel a bit more comfort that it is not high definition. | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2580 | It's the Irony Channel. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2581 | Watch and burn. | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2582 | At least our fire and brimstone won't be in high definition. | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2583 | Oh great, here comes the time share pitch. | 1.2841 | 0.06455 | 88 | 70 | 11 | 7 |
2584 | Somehow, when they promised us we could be on 'Roasting With The Stars' I was expecting something different. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2585 | The technology is old but the message is the same | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2586 | It's not quite what I expected. | 1.2841 | 0.05587 | 88 | 66 | 19 | 3 |
2587 | Can someone change that to Fox and Friends? | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2588 | This standing around really burns my ass. | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2589 | At least the television here is better. | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2590 | You’re new here. Spoiler alert . . . | 1.2841 | 0.05587 | 88 | 66 | 19 | 3 |
2591 | Actually, I find it less painful than commercial television. | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2592 | This is the strangest vacation pitch I have ever seen. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2593 | I used to be in corporate videos. Think that's how I got here. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2594 | A flatscreen would be heaven. | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2595 | In heaven, they have Mr. Roger's Neighborhood. | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2596 | Climate change is real. | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2597 | Yep. 7 days a week. 24 hour Trump station. | 1.2841 | 0.06654 | 88 | 71 | 9 | 8 |
2598 | No cable? You think he does that on purpose? | 1.2841 | 0.05348 | 88 | 65 | 21 | 2 |
2599 | first they make us watch 666 seasons of hell's kitchen on a Russian analog tv... | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2600 | This is hell, there is no remote. | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2601 | But as you'll see, it wasn't until my 666th appearance on Fox and Friends that I did my best work. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2602 | No cable in hell. | 1.2841 | 0.05348 | 88 | 65 | 21 | 2 |
2603 | Nobody calls it a "boob tube" anymore. | 1.2841 | 0.05587 | 88 | 66 | 19 | 3 |
2604 | We all wanted Reality-TV. Now I guess we get what we asked for. | 1.2841 | 0.06455 | 88 | 70 | 11 | 7 |
2605 | brimstone comes on at 10 | 1.2841 | 0.06654 | 88 | 71 | 9 | 8 |
2606 | You have to really check the reviews before you book one on these Groupon all inclusive getaway deals. Did you even look at the reviews Sharon? | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2607 | So everything really is black and white. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2608 | Hell, there’s no cable | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2609 | As orientation videos go, it's pretty ho-hum. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2610 | Of course it's hell—every time I try to adjust the picture, he pokes me! | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2611 | I think I’ve seen this show before. | 1.2841 | 0.05348 | 88 | 65 | 21 | 2 |
2612 | He's economizing! | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2613 | 'Just more re-runs of the Bill Cosby Show." | 1.2841 | 0.06455 | 88 | 70 | 11 | 7 |
2614 | Welcome to the premiere of "The Inconvenient Truth 5: The Devil Wears Nada" | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2615 | Big deal. I saw the original on Broadway. | 1.2841 | 0.06249 | 88 | 69 | 13 | 6 |
2616 | Is it too late to change my vote? America doesn't look that great after all. | 1.2841 | 0.06455 | 88 | 70 | 11 | 7 |
2617 | The other channel is Fox News. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2618 | They've been promising HD forever. Don't believe 'em. | 1.2841 | 0.06036 | 88 | 68 | 15 | 5 |
2619 | So this is where the old TVs went. | 1.2841 | 0.05816 | 88 | 67 | 17 | 4 |
2620 | Figures -- I saw this one already | 1.2840 | 0.05620 | 81 | 60 | 19 | 2 |
2621 | CNN? FOX? Isn't it just about choosing frying pan or fire? | 1.2840 | 0.06391 | 81 | 63 | 13 | 5 |
2622 | I never thought they would be worried about a fuel shortage down here. | 1.2826 | 0.05642 | 92 | 70 | 18 | 4 |
2623 | Broadcast TV? With a rabbit ears antenna. This IS Hell! | 1.2821 | 0.06294 | 78 | 60 | 14 | 4 |
2624 | The outdated technology is just torture. | 1.2821 | 0.06554 | 78 | 61 | 12 | 5 |
2625 | This is a rerun. | 1.2809 | 0.05533 | 89 | 67 | 19 | 3 |
2626 | At least nothing will shrink where we're going. | 1.2809 | 0.05759 | 89 | 68 | 17 | 4 |
2627 | It's going to be a loooong eternity | 1.2809 | 0.05533 | 89 | 67 | 19 | 3 |
2628 | You were a reality TV producer, too? Isn't that ironic? | 1.2809 | 0.05977 | 89 | 69 | 15 | 5 |
2629 | Due to budget cuts, you will need to use your imagination | 1.2809 | 0.05759 | 89 | 68 | 17 | 4 |
2630 | After having to watch FOX every day at our Federal offices, this channel is soothing. | 1.2809 | 0.05977 | 89 | 69 | 15 | 5 |
2631 | Not add a log....ANALOG | 1.2809 | 0.05759 | 89 | 68 | 17 | 4 |
2632 | Those are fake flames. | 1.2809 | 0.05977 | 89 | 69 | 15 | 5 |
2633 | At least we don’t have to watch Fox News! | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2634 | I really doubt his legal department requires the short intro video. I think he just like to show it. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2635 | Welcome to the ultimate red state where no one has any coverage. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2636 | From what I've heard this You Tube version sure beats the real thing! | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2637 | Just be grateful it's virtual reality! | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2638 | I’m not feeling the warmth. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2639 | Well, at least we're dressed for it . . . | 1.2791 | 0.05139 | 86 | 63 | 22 | 1 |
2640 | No HD, not even cable; this truely is Hell! | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2641 | Apparently, he’s had a dispute over cable fees after they found out nudity was involved. For now, it’a Rabbit ears... | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2642 | It beats The Apprentice. | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2643 | They say it's been picked up for another 13 weeks. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2644 | Is he using the fireplace app? | 1.2791 | 0.05139 | 86 | 63 | 22 | 1 |
2645 | I guess you could say the naked truth is Reality TV is literally going to hell. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2646 | When we talked about allying with People of Color, bright red with horns and a tail wasn’t the color I had in mind. | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2647 | These orientations seem to last for an eternity. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2648 | This is where they send you when you complain about your cable bill | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2649 | It's great here. Even get Fox News. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2650 | Dare we suggest to him aluminum foil for the rabbit ears? | 1.2791 | 0.06544 | 86 | 69 | 10 | 7 |
2651 | Guess where I put the remote | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2652 | Who did you vote for? | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2653 | We'll have to take off our fig leaves. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2654 | This used to be a Christmas tradition. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2655 | Let's hope the next election doesn't have the same results. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2656 | I have been told we can upgrade to cable but there will be hell to pay. | 1.2791 | 0.06544 | 86 | 69 | 10 | 7 |
2657 | I hate this show. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2658 | No flat screen, I guess this really is hell. | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2659 | I don't actually want the timeshare - just the free vacation. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2660 | I didn't know Netflix binging qualified as sloth. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2661 | I can't believe they only get one channel and it's the yule log. | 1.2791 | 0.06544 | 86 | 69 | 10 | 7 |
2662 | You know, the reception is much better than I was expecting. | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2663 | It's his favorite show. | 1.2791 | 0.05398 | 86 | 64 | 20 | 2 |
2664 | The experts all said we'd freeze over. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2665 | Rabbit ears. This must be the seventeenth circle of hell. | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2666 | I can’t wait to see the part that explains about brimstone! | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2667 | A five minute break for flames, then back to news. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2668 | Don't look now, but there's a naked guy at eleven o' clock. | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2669 | They need to show the safety video first. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2670 | Hell yes! I'm naked and afraid! | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2671 | But the fake news never mentions we have air conditioning. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2672 | It's not as bad as it looks. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2673 | I told you Heck was better than Hell. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2674 | No cable, no flat screen, no hi def, and all they get is Fox! | 1.2791 | 0.06544 | 86 | 69 | 10 | 7 |
2675 | Must be hell, it's all Three's Company reruns | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2676 | No cable. That’s the hell of it. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2677 | Not having a flatscreen is hell. | 1.2791 | 0.06750 | 86 | 70 | 8 | 8 |
2678 | This is virtual Hell! | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2679 | I thought hell was supposed to be other people. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2680 | The news is always so negative. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2681 | Just one boring channel -- for Eternity. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2682 | I can't stand it! Not only is it low def, but it's black & white! | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2683 | Welcome to the orientation program! | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2684 | Don't blame me for climate change, I drove a Prius. | 1.2791 | 0.05398 | 86 | 64 | 20 | 2 |
2685 | I'm all for safety training in case of a fire but this is ridiculous.... | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2686 | You know who I really feel bad for? The people looking at the back of the TV. | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2687 | Hell is losing its edge - could have been commercials. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2688 | Were doomed he has the remote! | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2689 | At least someone's trying to stop global warming. | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2690 | You'd think that with Satan's sinful materialism, he'd at least have a Flat Screen. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2691 | They get FOX News and CNN. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2692 | I'm not sure they needed a 20 minute orientation video. | 1.2791 | 0.05398 | 86 | 64 | 20 | 2 |
2693 | No remote?.... It's hell alright. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2694 | Reminds me of The Yule Log I used to watch | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2695 | I know how it ends. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2696 | He is sending us to Hawaii. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2697 | My kids were right. Living without modern technology IS Hell. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2698 | I never miss the previews. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2699 | I don't know. It does look like Hell, but the trident looks fake. | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2700 | Does he only get the Lava Channel? | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2701 | Is this a preview of what’s to come | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2702 | He comes to the colony every year, trying to sell us time shares. | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2703 | No flat screen? This is hell. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2704 | I'll bet it's fake news. | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2705 | Besides the humiliation of being naked, we can't change the channel. | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2706 | This show has a real cult following. | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2707 | I should have known that, if I supported Donald Trump's quest for power, it would come to this! | 1.2791 | 0.05883 | 86 | 66 | 16 | 4 |
2708 | Reminds me of my thermodynamics class in college, only way hotter. | 1.2791 | 0.06544 | 86 | 69 | 10 | 7 |
2709 | Is this the audition for,Naked and Afraid? | 1.2791 | 0.06331 | 86 | 68 | 12 | 6 |
2710 | Honestly, I am surprised they even have an orientation! | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2711 | No, I get the post-modern-techno-criticism of it. I'm just saying mine shrinks when it's cold, and that's why I wish it was a real fire. | 1.2791 | 0.05646 | 86 | 65 | 18 | 3 |
2712 | Oh, I know! You got a haircut! | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2713 | This is the casting call for 'Naked and Afraid: Dante's Inferno'. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2714 | It’s the same everyday; hot as hell again. | 1.2791 | 0.06111 | 86 | 67 | 14 | 5 |
2715 | Is he really trying to sell us on Hell? | 1.2771 | 0.05231 | 83 | 61 | 21 | 1 |
2716 | The trailers always oversell it. | 1.2759 | 0.05824 | 87 | 67 | 16 | 4 |
2717 | Hell is other people...and standard definition. | 1.2759 | 0.06266 | 87 | 69 | 12 | 6 |
2718 | Fake fire burns me up. | 1.2759 | 0.06266 | 87 | 69 | 12 | 6 |
2719 | The real torture is that every channel is the same. | 1.2738 | 0.05706 | 84 | 64 | 17 | 3 |
2720 | Can you believe it? Only one channel and it’s their version of the Yule log. | 1.2738 | 0.05706 | 84 | 64 | 17 | 3 |
2721 | It’s the same infomercial on every channel. | 1.2738 | 0.06189 | 84 | 66 | 13 | 5 |
2722 | No commericals, though. Amiright? | 1.2738 | 0.05952 | 84 | 65 | 15 | 4 |
2723 | I've been to a lot of timeshare sales pitches but this one's amazing. | 1.2738 | 0.05449 | 84 | 63 | 19 | 2 |
2724 | This level of technology will be a real turn off for millennials. | 1.2738 | 0.05952 | 84 | 65 | 15 | 4 |
2725 | it's only real when you see it on television. | 1.2738 | 0.05952 | 84 | 65 | 15 | 4 |
2726 | Yeah, I was a reality TV producer, too. | 1.2738 | 0.05952 | 84 | 65 | 15 | 4 |
2727 | If even these guys can do their part on global warming.... | 1.2738 | 0.06636 | 84 | 68 | 9 | 7 |
2728 | I heard we'll get real flames if enough of us donate to the Patreon | 1.2738 | 0.06189 | 84 | 66 | 13 | 5 |
2729 | It's always Christmas down here. That's the hell of it. | 1.2738 | 0.06636 | 84 | 68 | 9 | 7 |
2730 | No carbon OR microfibre pollution, good for him! | 1.2738 | 0.05952 | 84 | 65 | 15 | 4 |
2731 | It's the usual. There's a 90 minute presentation before you collect the prize. | 1.2738 | 0.06636 | 84 | 68 | 9 | 7 |
2732 | I think it got the idea from watching the Yule log. | 1.2738 | 0.06189 | 84 | 66 | 13 | 5 |
2733 | Welcome to Heaven, or as god likes to call it, “Hell”. | 1.2738 | 0.06416 | 84 | 67 | 11 | 6 |
2734 | Reality TV was hell on Earth, too. | 1.2738 | 0.06416 | 84 | 67 | 11 | 6 |
2735 | Of course it's not High Def. This is hell, you know. | 1.2738 | 0.05952 | 84 | 65 | 15 | 4 |
2736 | No digital high definition flames? This really IS Hell. | 1.2738 | 0.06189 | 84 | 66 | 13 | 5 |
2737 | And if anyone complains about what’s in hell-o-vision, we’ll put it on the Hallmark Channel. | 1.2738 | 0.05952 | 84 | 65 | 15 | 4 |
2738 | No, there's no WiFi. There's not even goddam basic cable! | 1.2738 | 0.06189 | 84 | 66 | 13 | 5 |
2739 | I love reality television. | 1.2738 | 0.05449 | 84 | 63 | 19 | 2 |
2740 | If those are not real flames, then are we fake nudes? | 1.2738 | 0.06189 | 84 | 66 | 13 | 5 |
2741 | Is this the show about the dangers of infernal warming? | 1.2738 | 0.05952 | 84 | 65 | 15 | 4 |