Contest #610


Cartoon

610


Name Value
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Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 'Bad news. They found the proof in the pudding.' 1.9792 0.01190 4762 1657 1547 1558
1 You can keep calling it "flambé," but out here it's felony arson. 1.9462 0.01033 6026 2107 2136 1783
2 They're asking if you prefer gas or electric... 1.9325 0.01064 6045 2284 1885 1876
3 Beat until stiff meant the eggs. 1.9290 0.01012 6328 2290 2197 1841
4 The good news is they're letting you prepare your last meal. 1.9009 0.01134 4915 1820 1762 1333
5 Cooking meth doesn't make you a chef, Steve. 1.8947 0.01083 5669 2215 1836 1618
6 For heaven's sake give them the recipe! 1.8828 0.01113 5188 2005 1786 1397
7 On the bright side, he'll never give you a bad review again. 1.8809 0.01011 6170 2358 2189 1623
8 Prepare to serve ten to twenty. 1.8783 0.01013 6047 2287 2209 1551
9 On the bright side, your "Death by Chocolate" exceeded expectations. 1.8724 0.01085 5472 2156 1858 1458
10 When you said you were going to grill the witness I had no idea. 1.8714 0.01040 5988 2374 2010 1604
11 As White House chef, you must have been expecting this. 1.8674 0.01050 6148 2546 1871 1731
12 Good news. I found an attorney specializing in torte law. 1.8511 0.01019 5964 2355 2142 1467
13 As the White House Chef, half the world is hailing you as a hero for at least attempting it. 1.8491 0.01075 6042 2632 1690 1720
14 No. I told you “poisson.” 1.8483 0.01132 4918 1979 1706 1233
15 Evidently, the jury found it hard to swallow, too. 1.8469 0.00978 6095 2313 2402 1380
16 No one cares that the knife came out clean. 1.8411 0.01036 5904 2412 2018 1474
17 It doesn't look good. The butcher and the candlestick maker both took a plea. 1.8314 0.01052 5648 2322 1956 1370
18 You didn’t find it suspicious that they were selling oregano by the ounce? 1.8250 0.01056 5361 2154 1991 1216
19 They're making you out to be some kind of a butcher. 1.8246 0.01012 5786 2310 2181 1295
20 I guess the Times' restaurant critic has more clout than we realized. 1.8183 0.01068 5398 2242 1895 1261
21 We're rebranding. "Killer Chef" is out. "Serving Thyme" is in. 1.8179 0.01352 3251 1316 1211 724
22 You wouldn't be here if it wasn't for that little tart! 1.8178 0.01126 4869 2027 1702 1140
23 So who's the chef at Mar-a-lago now? 1.8111 0.01103 5468 2434 1633 1401
24 On the positive side, you're the reason the prison cafeteria now has a Michelin rating. 1.8067 0.01025 5489 2214 2122 1153
25 For 30 years at home you never cooked. After two weeks in prison you're the chef? 1.8065 0.01127 4956 2131 1653 1172
26 Everyone else got 12 years, for some reason you got 13. 1.7965 0.01123 5209 2347 1575 1287
27 You and I both know salt is the real killer. 1.7960 0.01072 5368 2315 1833 1220
28 Honey, just tell them where you stashed the dough. 1.7822 0.01389 2961 1238 1130 593
29 When someone orders their steak well done, you have to learn to just let it go. 1.7773 0.01385 3035 1297 1117 621
30 Oh honey, 'shank' means something very different on the inside. 1.7719 0.01150 4406 1901 1609 896
31 See if you can join the gang Martha Stewart was in 1.7715 0.01169 4332 1891 1540 901
32 Have you decided...gas or electric? 1.7693 0.01170 4591 2095 1460 1036
33 Next time - just bake the gay wedding cake. 1.7687 0.01179 4660 2173 1392 1095
34 I distinctly said poisson! 1.7612 0.01174 4435 2011 1472 952
35 The good news is you get to prepare your last meal. 1.7586 0.01202 4197 1901 1408 888
36 You're looking at 20 years, 15 if you use convection. 1.7572 0.01244 3942 1797 1305 840
37 I couldn’t raise the dough. 1.7552 0.01233 3970 1803 1336 831
38 He said to tell you not to worry. Not only will you be pardoned, but you're going to be the new head of the FDA. 1.7483 0.01291 3925 1901 1111 913
39 Let me make this simple, Simon. I've met a pie man. 1.7323 0.01249 3934 1874 1239 821
40 How much thyme? 1.7291 0.01228 3847 1778 1333 736
41 I've found a good torte lawyer. 1.7254 0.01110 4672 2163 1629 880
42 They wanted to give you the electric chair, but I told them you'd prefer gas. 1.7249 0.01128 4663 2202 1542 919
43 Don't lecture me about using a cake mix. Do you want the damn file or not? 1.7226 0.01326 3486 1686 1081 719
44 So how's the food? 1.7180 0.01320 3454 1664 1100 690
45 The good news is they've reduced your sentence to 45 minutes; the bad news is it's at 325 degrees 1.7115 0.01413 3109 1542 922 645
46 Death by Chocolate was clearly stated on the menu. The judge is going to dismiss the charges. 1.7097 0.01658 2043 956 724 363
47 It's show about you and they're calling it "Baking Bad". 1.7093 0.01462 2707 1291 912 504
48 Seriously....you cooked the books? 1.6928 0.01831 1748 863 559 326
49 Remember when i said I’d kill for 3 Michelin stars? 1.6896 0.01694 1962 951 669 342
50 You should have let him put ketchup on his steak. 1.6872 0.01336 3203 1573 1059 571
51 eHarmony said that you were a responsible professional in a secure environment. 1.6868 0.01511 2644 1341 790 513
52 What do you want me to do with the ah, meat in the garage freezer? 1.6851 0.01316 3379 1688 1067 624
53 Organic, locally-sourced cocaine is still cocaine, dear. 1.6847 0.01312 3435 1727 1064 644
54 I hope that tart was worth it. 1.6759 0.01351 3249 1660 982 607
55 They say you'll be out in 20, but will have to cool for another 10. 1.6668 0.01507 2386 1176 829 381
56 The butcher and the candlestick maker? They both have alibis. 1.6664 0.01534 2296 1131 800 365
57 I told you it was a recipe for disaster. 1.6661 0.01383 2914 1461 965 488
58 l told you not to take the White House chef job. 1.6628 0.01615 2358 1256 641 461
59 It's about your goose. It's cooked. 1.6573 0.01703 1967 1013 615 339
60 I warned you not to cook the books. 1.6546 0.01376 2889 1461 965 463
61 Well you are in Cook County Jail. 1.6543 0.01561 2337 1209 727 401
62 The good news is I've lost twenty pounds 1.6525 0.01467 2472 1236 859 377
63 No Maurice. What you did to that soufflé was criminal. 1.6429 0.01814 1686 876 536 274
64 I want to believe you, dear, but the victim was battered. 1.6388 0.01601 2085 1069 700 316
65 No, I’m not your attorney. I’m Edith Mandlebaum and I’m here about my grandson’s bar mitzvah. 1.6339 0.02268 1128 609 323 196
66 When the judge said you had to serve 8 to 10, he meant years not guests. 1.6338 0.01543 2305 1209 731 365
67 I know I said I'd wait for you, but I got really hungry. 1.6323 0.01520 2328 1211 762 355
68 We've renamed it "Four Guys". 1.6289 0.02166 1183 629 364 190
69 How’s the food? 1.6250 0.01518 2488 1354 713 421
70 Bad news. Forensics found traces of gluten. 1.6245 0.01734 1819 967 568 284
71 I miss your buns. 1.6227 0.01772 1773 954 534 285
72 I told you not to accept the White House Chef Position. 1.6225 0.01588 2408 1357 603 448
73 Well, at least now you know the difference between price fixing and prix fixe. 1.6221 0.01921 1466 778 464 224
74 LIMERICK: There once was a chef named Al Dente...Who had trouble paying the rente...So with each order to go, he started skimming some dough...And for embezzlement, to the prison he was sente. 1.6217 0.01963 1438 773 436 229
75 So you’re saying the proof is in the pudding? 1.6187 0.01551 2287 1231 697 359
76 Remember, the first thing you need to do is find the biggest guy in the place, and make him lasagna 1.6161 0.02303 1068 586 306 176
77 I agree Jules, gluten should not be a crime, but here we are. 1.6160 0.01896 1414 735 487 192
78 So let me get this straight, they're making you cook your own last meal? 1.6148 0.01617 2183 1205 614 364
79 I knew that tart would get you in trouble. 1.6132 0.01604 2107 1136 650 321
80 Nevertheless, the murder-mystery dinner was complete hit. 1.6115 0.01774 1758 960 521 277
81 The judge ruled the evidence inadmissible, but delicious. 1.6089 0.01655 1928 1033 616 279
82 You promised to stop poaching. 1.6078 0.01721 1790 963 566 261
83 Just give me the recipe and I’ll drop the charges. 1.6076 0.01717 1878 1033 549 296
84 They've got you on prix fixing. 1.6052 0.01748 1821 1008 524 289
85 I...I have a microwave now. 1.6035 0.01817 1667 920 488 259
86 I believe you when you say the butcher killed the candlestick maker. What I don’t understand is why you three were in the tub together in the first place. 1.6023 0.01891 1637 934 420 283
87 I heard the butcher and the candlestick maker are turning state’s evidence. 1.5988 0.01798 1680 928 498 254
88 ....and where did you stash the dough? 1.5977 0.01831 1648 920 471 257
89 They’ll knock off six months if you tell them where you hid the dough. 1.5959 0.01800 1611 877 508 226
90 Maybe you should rethink that "Death by Chocolate" recipe. 1.5947 0.01826 1574 861 490 223
91 You and your half-baked schemes! 1.5944 0.01831 1536 833 493 210
92 I think you need to tell Mueller how you really got the chicken Kiev recipe. 1.5943 0.02386 1018 585 261 172
93 While similar, "poisson" is actually the French word for fish. 1.5938 0.01867 1556 866 456 234
94 On the plus side, THAT guy is not going to criticize your food anymore. 1.5931 0.01888 1536 860 441 235
95 What you're calling avant-garde, they're calling cannibalism. 1.5917 0.01995 1489 869 359 261
96 Well, look on the bright side. Maybe they'll give you a choice between gas and electric? 1.5895 0.01989 1452 837 374 241
97 The butcher lawyered up, but I think the candlestick maker is talking. 1.5863 0.02033 1339 762 369 208
98 'Death by chocolate' is just an expression. 1.5848 0.01968 1351 750 412 189
99 How was I supposed to know the proof was in the pudding? 1.5846 0.02015 1353 769 377 207
100 How’s the food? 1.5810 0.02089 1284 741 340 203
101 Where'd you put the dough? 1.5808 0.02081 1231 694 359 178
102 Bad news...the Butcher and Candlestick Maker both turned state's evidence. 1.5786 0.02146 1234 720 314 200
103 Didn't I warn you it was a recipe for disaster? 1.5780 0.02061 1230 690 369 171
104 So listen. I talked to Shelly's husband who is a branding guy, and he thinks "prison-to-table" really has legs. 1.5779 0.02054 1220 680 375 165
105 In Wisconsin, margarine Is a crime. 1.5775 0.03135 542 307 157 78
106 See you next week at 3:50 for 25-30 minutes. 1.5770 0.02058 1220 682 372 166
107 Your fingers were in too many pies. 1.5753 0.02075 1182 658 368 156
108 I thought you should know that you left a bun in the oven. 1.5746 0.02139 1173 670 332 171
109 Look at the bright side, our wine collection will be peaking when you get out. 1.5740 0.03240 493 277 149 67
110 It's over. I've bought a microwave. 1.5738 0.02113 1152 646 351 155
111 'The charge is baking and entering.' 1.5722 0.02190 1087 615 322 150
112 Really?! You used LARD! In California? 1.5718 0.02202 1128 653 305 170
113 Gas or electric? 1.5717 0.02245 1123 661 282 180
114 This sounds like yet another one of your half baked ideas. 1.5711 0.02523 767 422 252 93
115 Maybe now you'll remember the difference between 'poison' and 'poisson'. 1.5707 0.02164 1104 624 330 150
116 I know, you kneaded the dough. 1.5686 0.02247 1078 626 291 161
117 I was a little confused when you told me you were in the Cook County Jail. 1.5672 0.02244 1056 608 297 151
118 The judge wants to know how long to put you in for. 1.5665 0.02197 1045 588 322 135
119 Well, Don't cry to me. You're the one who wanted to be the White House chef. 1.5665 0.02331 1045 621 256 168
120 Apparently you mentioned your Cherry Bombe to someone in line at the airport ticket counter. 1.5649 0.02330 1025 605 261 159
121 When you say you'll be out in a dozen months, is that 12 or 13? 1.5646 0.02315 1022 599 269 154
122 The butcher and the candlestick maker are taking a plea bargain. 1.5635 0.02315 1008 588 272 148
123 'Dessert to die for' was supposed to be a metaphor. 1.5596 0.02399 956 566 245 145
124 Of course I don't believe adding cilantro is criminal...but that's not how the jury felt. 1.5589 0.02384 950 558 253 139
125 I gotta be honest, it's not looking good. The Butcher and the Candlestick Maker have already rolled over. 1.5575 0.02364 931 539 265 127
126 The butcher is standing strong but the candlestick maker is turning state witness. 1.5564 0.02321 922 524 283 115
127 Honey, I can't find a torte lawyer. 1.5536 0.02380 887 509 265 113
128 ...but the detective said the proof is in the pudding. 1.5534 0.02339 889 503 280 106
129 The appeal failed. You're going to fry. 1.5528 0.02398 881 508 259 114
130 The lawyers are saying there was no proof in the pudding. 1.5513 0.02466 867 510 236 121
131 The Feds flipped the butcher and the candlestick maker. It's not looking good! 1.5513 0.02471 867 511 234 122
132 So, when you said "capers," you weren't talking condiments? 1.5504 0.02411 854 490 258 106
133 It was me. I spilled the beans. 1.5486 0.02486 833 487 235 111
134 I think you are getting your just desserts. 1.5477 0.02615 734 425 216 93
135 On the bright side, thanks to your incarceration, the prison just got its first Michelin star. 1.5476 0.02460 829 480 244 105
136 Even served cold, revenge gets you 10 to life. 1.5473 0.02453 824 475 247 102
137 Just give them the recipe and end this madness. 1.5473 0.02513 824 485 227 112
138 You should have just let him have ketchup on his steak. 1.5452 0.02589 807 485 204 118
139 They know about the gluten. 1.5450 0.02589 800 479 206 115
140 I do think it will hurt your chances for a third star. 1.5449 0.02416 802 453 261 88
141 So - long story short - you're being held by the Central Intelligence Agency, not the Culinary Institute of America. 1.5445 0.02578 797 475 210 112
142 They wouldn't have gotten suspicious if you hadn't capitalized the C in " roast Chuck ". 1.5445 0.02633 797 484 192 121
143 The good news is that baking and entering isn’t a serious offense. 1.5431 0.02506 788 457 234 97
144 I'm calling to cancel my reservation. 1.5430 0.02592 779 463 209 107
145 Asking for ketchup with his Beef Wellington! Of course, you should have shot him. 1.5424 0.02608 778 465 204 109
146 So where did you hide the dough? 1.5411 0.02643 767 462 195 110
147 The judge says you're gonna fry. 1.5411 0.02538 767 446 227 94
148 Don’t be upset, Paul, but I need your wedding cake recipe. 1.5411 0.02630 767 460 199 108
149 Couldn’t resist cooking the books, could you? 1.5397 0.02580 756 444 216 96
150 Poisson! Two “S”’s. Autocorrect is not a defense. 1.5397 0.02666 756 457 190 109
151 Hate to be the one to tell you but the butcher and candlestick maker have accepted plea agreements. 1.5397 0.02653 756 455 194 107
152 They said you're going to fry 1.5382 0.02583 747 438 216 93
153 So... there are two S's in poisson... 1.5378 0.02650 740 442 198 100
154 Couldn't you see that it was a recipe for disaster? 1.5377 0.02637 742 442 201 99
155 No. I dont remember the recipe for your tunnel cake. 1.5377 0.02753 716 436 175 105
156 Reportedly, the butcher and candlestick maker have already flipped. 1.5365 0.02707 727 440 184 103
157 So that's why they call it the Cook County Jail. 1.5355 0.02687 719 431 191 97
158 The proof was in the pudding. 1.5354 0.02675 721 431 194 96
159 Unfortunately, the judge agrees that your chocolate mousse soufflé was to die for. 1.5350 0.02658 714 423 200 91
160 ....and where did you stash the dough? 1.5333 0.02661 705 417 200 88
161 I've started seeing other menus. 1.5324 0.02651 695 408 204 83
162 Sorry, dear, but I think your goose is cooked. 1.5324 0.02698 695 414 192 89
163 Turns out, we had too many crooks in the kitchen 1.5318 0.02588 692 398 220 74
164 They said they're gonna leave you in for 25 to 30, or until you appear done. 1.5307 0.02691 684 405 195 84
165 Truth be told, darling, I think you finally got your just deserts. 1.5307 0.02777 684 416 173 95
166 What do you mean, you were cooking the books? 1.5303 0.02712 677 402 191 84
167 No Steve, I don't want to know what a "tossed salad" means in prison. 1.5291 0.02803 671 409 169 93
168 It’s not looking good. The butcher and candlestick maker talked. 1.5291 0.02858 671 416 155 100
169 Your kale pasta is being treated as a hate crime. 1.5284 0.02836 668 411 161 96
170 Fred, will you be home for the Hollandaise? 1.5284 0.02764 668 402 179 87
171 I tried to warn you, it was a recipe for disaster. 1.5279 0.02680 663 388 200 75
172 It was the sous-chef who reported you for a salt-and-battering. 1.5269 0.02777 651 390 179 82
173 They've definitely got you on salt and battering. 1.5269 0.02827 651 396 167 88
174 But darling, revenge is better served cold. 1.5262 0.02754 650 387 184 79
175 They will hear your case at the food court 1.5262 0.02763 650 388 182 80
176 This isn't even the worst of it, you should see what they're saying on Yelp! 1.5262 0.02694 650 380 198 72
177 I’m guessing you believe expiration dates now? 1.5262 0.02685 650 379 200 71
178 They said you were cooking the books. 1.5262 0.02780 650 390 178 82
179 Sooo - how's the food? 1.5257 0.02846 643 392 164 87
180 The Free Range chickens were wearing a wire. 1.5251 0.02863 638 390 161 87
181 Michelin wants its star back. 1.5249 0.02806 642 387 173 82
182 They said you're gonna fry. 1.5249 0.02824 642 389 169 84
183 Tommy spilled the beans. 1.5245 0.02729 633 371 192 70
184 You shouldn't have smothered the onions 1.5231 0.02778 629 374 181 74
185 I’m having trouble raising the dough. 1.5213 0.02843 610 366 170 74
186 I'd say your goose is cooked. 1.5212 0.02855 612 369 167 76
187 People take organic very seriously. 1.5212 0.02724 614 357 194 63
188 Nice try, but Trump recovered. 1.5206 0.03047 607 386 126 95
189 When You said You where making killer brownies , I had no idea ! 1.5205 0.02740 609 355 191 63
190 Table Nine is still unhappy and say they’ll wait. 1.5199 0.02893 604 367 160 77
191 It all seems to be a misunderstanding about the spelling of 'poisson.' 1.5199 0.02874 604 365 164 75
192 The butcher and the candlestick maker are blaming it all on you. 1.5199 0.02968 604 375 144 85
193 Remember when you said MY cooking was criminal? 1.5192 0.02892 599 363 161 75
194 I warned you being White House Chef was risky. 1.5191 0.02913 601 367 156 78
195 Why not just say "I am not a cook!" 1.5185 0.02941 596 366 151 79
196 Yes, I’ll check to see if you left the oven on. 1.5182 0.04438 247 148 70 29
197 Well, the girls are both pregnant and Buddy got picked up for dealing weed but the worst...I hate to tell you...your sourdough starter died. 1.5178 0.02960 591 364 148 79
198 I'm sorry, John, I just can't go on like this. I've . . . I've started to go to other restaurants. 1.5170 0.02728 588 339 194 55
199 If it contains a file, who cares if it's moist? 1.5163 0.02891 583 351 163 69
200 The difference between baking bread and breaking bad is about 20 years. 1.5148 0.02939 573 348 155 70
201 Danny, please. Cooking meth doesn't make you a chef! 1.5133 0.02892 563 336 165 62
202 I've been telling the kids you're doing thyme. 1.5133 0.02938 565 342 156 67
203 Well, it did help Martha Stewart’s career. 1.5125 0.02904 560 335 163 62
204 Serving 10 to 12? 1.5117 0.02878 555 329 168 58
205 Yes, cooking the books is a crime! 1.5117 0.02937 557 336 157 64
206 Unfortunately, it looks like the butcher and the candlestick-maker have air-tight alibis. 1.5117 0.03013 557 343 143 71
207 I heard you're going to fry. 1.5117 0.03066 557 348 133 76
208 The feds didn’t believe it was four pounds of oregano. 1.5117 0.02859 557 329 171 57
209 Tell me where you hid the dough. 1.5117 0.02992 557 341 147 69
210 I warned you, dear. The President gets TWO scoops of ice cream. 1.5107 0.03012 560 346 142 72
211 It's Air Force One, you don't 'try something new.' 1.5101 0.03019 545 334 144 67
212 I told you not to take that job at the White House. 1.5101 0.03214 545 352 108 85
213 When the restaurant critic said your foie gras was to die for, he was being ironic. 1.5084 0.02853 537 314 173 50
214 You wouldn't believe what I had to go through to get seated. 1.5084 0.03075 537 333 135 69
215 Well, it's just that I thought you meant something different when you said that you were a 'killer' chef... 1.5075 0.03097 532 331 132 69
216 They say it'll be gas or electric. 1.5075 0.03120 532 333 128 71
217 I have a bun in the oven and it isn’t yours. 1.5057 0.03095 522 323 134 65
218 Your parole has been denied. The warden loves your bouillabaisse 1.5057 0.03083 522 322 136 64
219 You are not home; so yes, I put the knives in the dishwasher. 1.5057 0.03083 522 322 136 64
220 They say the proof was in the pudding 1.5048 0.03156 519 326 124 69
221 Yes, apparently, I shouldn't have used the words 'to die for' when describing your bisque to the detectives. I see that now. 1.5044 0.03326 454 282 115 57
222 The butcher and the candlestick maker made bail. 1.5020 0.02999 504 302 151 51
223 Please just give the Judge's wife the recipe. 1.5000 0.03115 504 312 132 60
224 This is what you get for cooking the books. 1.5000 0.03096 494 302 137 55
225 Just tell me where you hid the dough 1.5000 0.03157 484 298 130 56
226 Non monsieur, poisson! Poisson! Non poison. 1.4990 0.03083 491 299 139 53
227 They say you'll fry for this 1.4979 0.03134 486 299 132 55
228 I'm afraid I ate your alibi. 1.4979 0.03251 484 306 115 63
229 "Baking chicken with herbs for the warden does not count as 'thyme served' ". 1.4969 0.03103 481 293 137 51
230 They said you’re looking at 15 to 20, or until golden brown. 1.4969 0.03239 481 303 117 61
231 You're toast. 1.4958 0.03265 476 301 114 61
232 ...the judge has granted a change of menu. 1.4958 0.03216 472 294 122 56
233 We’re making do. Ordering in most nights. 1.4947 0.03151 471 289 131 51
234 I miss your buns. 1.4947 0.03207 471 293 123 55
235 A salt and buttery charge again? 1.4946 0.03326 467 298 107 62
236 So what's it like being the White House chef? 1.4936 0.03427 466 305 92 69
237 Yes, I know you're trying for a reduction. 1.4936 0.03131 466 284 134 48
238 Quit saying 'I am not a cook.' No one believes you. 1.4936 0.03219 466 290 122 54
239 I told you not to take that White House job! 1.4935 0.03450 462 303 90 69
240 Have you thought about what you'd like for your last meal? 1.4924 0.03302 461 292 111 58
241 How much thyme are you serving? 1.4924 0.03259 461 289 117 55
242 I’m sorry. They said you were serving thyme. 1.4924 0.03171 461 283 129 49
243 Bad news... I couldn't raise the dough. 1.4923 0.03423 457 297 95 65
244 Electric or gas? 1.4912 0.03381 452 290 102 60
245 You're not allowed to kill people for putting ketchup on your steaks. 1.4900 0.03268 451 282 117 52
246 How'd they pick you out of the lineup?! 1.4899 0.03259 447 278 119 50
247 Did you know it was Stollen? 1.4899 0.03243 447 277 121 49
248 I said, "make a confection," not confession! 1.4899 0.03212 447 275 125 47
249 Tell me where you hid the dough. 1.4899 0.03316 445 280 112 53
250 They found the dough. 1.4899 0.03316 445 280 112 53
251 Your appeal has been put on the back burner. 1.4886 0.03136 440 265 135 40
252 How much thyme did you get? 1.4862 0.03394 434 277 103 54
253 Well done. 1.4861 0.03293 432 269 116 47
254 Don't you remember revenge is a dish best served cold? 1.4860 0.03369 430 272 107 51
255 Spare me another one of your half-baked alibis. 1.4860 0.03271 430 266 119 45
256 Really? Now you start cooking? 1.4860 0.03557 430 284 83 63
257 Don't worry. I hid the dough. 1.4860 0.03496 430 280 91 59
258 I'd like our marriage over easy. 1.4860 0.03433 430 276 99 55
259 I don't care if he asked for ketchup, he's the President of the United States! 1.4848 0.03455 429 277 96 56
260 Warden Jones likes you because nobody can fit through the vent ducts anymore. 1.4848 0.03375 429 272 106 51
261 I'm tired of your half-baked excuses. 1.4847 0.03431 425 272 100 53
262 When you said you made killer napoleons, I did not take that literally. 1.4847 0.03231 425 260 124 41
263 You may call it "foie gras" but I call it "your goose is cooked". 1.4835 0.03388 424 269 105 50
264 They want to know where you hid the dough. 1.4835 0.03453 424 273 97 54
265 So, we try to pin it on the candlestick maker. 1.4835 0.03501 424 276 91 57
266 I thought you were being facetious when you said you'd kill for that recipe. 1.4835 0.03271 424 262 119 43
267 I had to sell all the saffron to pay your lawyer. 1.4835 0.03405 424 270 103 51
268 I couldn't find a file, so I brought a zester. 1.4833 0.03311 420 261 115 44
269 It's not looking good. The lobsters have obtained counsel. 1.4833 0.03362 420 264 109 47
270 Michelin took away all three stars. They called the murders "erratic and uninspired." 1.4821 0.03333 419 262 112 45
271 I told you that food critic was tough. 1.4819 0.03322 415 258 114 43
272 For God's sake, your boss is a clown and it's just a hamburger. Tell them the formula for the secret sauce. 1.4819 0.03493 415 268 94 53
273 They say you’ll be out in 12 to 14 minutes. 1.4819 0.03305 415 257 116 42
274 Dear, I told you: in Italy you can't put pineapple on pizza. 1.4819 0.03426 415 264 102 49
275 Your case is on the back burner. 1.4819 0.03287 415 256 118 41
276 They're transferring you to Leavenworth. 1.4819 0.03575 415 273 84 58
277 You're a bread man walking. 1.4818 0.03522 413 268 91 54
278 Great news! They'll let you cook your own last meal! 1.4818 0.03455 413 264 99 50
279 Hi, I know you're tied up at the moment but I was wondering if I could change my April 10th reservations to April 14? 1.4804 0.03469 408 261 98 49
280 Just tell me. Where did you hide the dough 1.4804 0.03469 408 261 98 49
281 I told you it was a recipe for disaster. 1.4804 0.03273 408 250 120 38
282 It turns out Cajun/Polish fusion IS a crime. 1.4804 0.03572 408 267 86 55
283 It's harder than you'd think to find a culinary lawyer. 1.4804 0.03345 408 254 112 42
284 So I guess it is a crime to serve a red wine with fish... 1.4792 0.03285 409 252 118 39
285 You should have thought of that before you cooked the books. 1.4790 0.03435 405 257 102 46
286 Sorry, but the sign clearly stated: EMPLOYEES MUST WASH HANDS BEFORE RETURNING TO WORK. 1.4790 0.03453 405 258 100 47
287 I said use Granny Smith apples in the pie. Apples! 1.4790 0.03471 405 259 98 48
288 The lawyer said your the first chef to be convicted of prix fixing. 1.4789 0.03448 403 256 101 46
289 Your lawyer says she can get the charges reduced to salt and buttery. 1.4776 0.03490 402 258 96 48
290 Last week laundry detail and now this. You are going to be the perfect husband when you get out! 1.4776 0.03400 402 253 106 43
291 I know you're getting out in twenty, but I'll come back and check on you in fifteen. 1.4775 0.03338 400 248 113 39
292 you should not have told that customs officer that making a bombe was your speciality. 1.4774 0.03331 398 246 114 38
293 They want you to simplify your last meal. 1.4774 0.03498 398 255 96 47
294 They say they can get your sentence reduced for thyme served... 1.4774 0.03369 398 248 110 40
295 Don't worry. We just need one person on the jury to agree there were too many of you in that kitchen. 1.4772 0.03393 394 246 108 40
296 Yes, it's great you are learning a new skill, but your prison sentence was up 3 months ago. 1.4758 0.03322 393 242 115 36
297 Yes, I’m SURE you turned off the oven. 1.4758 0.03361 393 244 111 38
298 Did your soufflé really fall, or did you push it? 1.4758 0.03437 393 248 103 42
299 Turns out three of the five herbs in your special sauce are illegal. 1.4757 0.03450 391 247 102 42
300 How could you? Me with three kids and another in the oven? 1.4757 0.03431 391 246 104 41
301 I'm afraid it's worse than you realize. One of the diners who survived was the food critic. 1.4756 0.03386 389 242 109 38
302 Poaching? 1.4745 0.03462 392 249 100 43
303 Look on the bright side. In France you would have gotten life. 1.4744 0.03399 390 244 107 39
304 Honey, for the sake of the kids, tell them where you hid the dough! 1.4742 0.03352 388 240 112 36
305 So he sent the steak back three times, so what? 1.4741 0.03365 386 239 111 36
306 The police found evidence of croutons in your gluten-free salad. I'm afraid you're toast. 1.4726 0.03580 383 248 89 46
307 I've started seeing the candlestick maker. 1.4726 0.03560 383 247 91 45
308 I know it was you. In the kitchen. With the candlestick. 1.4724 0.03396 381 237 108 36
309 Relax...you'll be out in 20-25 minutes. 1.4723 0.03470 379 239 101 39
310 The prosecutor says the proof was in the pudding. 1.4723 0.03608 379 246 87 46
311 They said you'd be out in 25-30. Or 15-20 at 450º. 1.4723 0.03429 379 237 105 37
312 They say the proof was in the pudding 1.4706 0.03523 374 238 96 40
313 Your alibi was thin and tasteless, while your statement to the court was stale and lukewarm. 1.4706 0.03482 374 236 100 38
314 The butcher and the candlestick maker have already pleaded guilty. 1.4690 0.03523 371 236 96 39
315 It’s all over. The butcher and the candlestick maker cut a deal with the DA. 1.4690 0.03605 371 240 88 43
316 The only thing you'll be serving now is life. 1.4688 0.03537 369 235 95 39
317 When they told me I could find you in the cooler, I didn't think it would be here. 1.4688 0.03431 369 230 105 34
318 Your lawyer said you're done. 1.4685 0.03480 365 229 101 35
319 I warned you. No one likes cilantro. 1.4672 0.03516 366 232 97 37
320 I'll leave the oven light on for you. 1.4670 0.03443 364 227 104 33
321 Will do... but is it O.K. if I use a mix? 1.4670 0.03376 364 224 110 30
322 I'm renaming the shop Just Desserts. 1.4669 0.03671 362 236 83 43
323 I told you the Trump-Putin wedding cake was a bad idea. 1.4669 0.03733 362 239 77 46
324 I understand, 5 to 7 years, but at what temperature? 1.4652 0.03543 359 228 95 36
325 The D.A. says you're gonna fry for this... 1.4652 0.03476 359 225 101 33
326 Attica just got 3 stars... 1.4652 0.03608 359 231 89 39
327 I told you "cooking the books" was risky. But nooooooo.... 1.4650 0.03623 357 230 88 39
328 I set the timer on the stove for 5 years. 1.4650 0.03579 357 228 92 37
329 I warned you not to take the job as White House executive chef. 1.4650 0.03730 357 235 78 44
330 The jury didn't swallow it. 1.4650 0.03468 357 223 102 32
331 Red wine with fish, what did you expect: a slap on the wrist! 1.4648 0.03660 355 230 85 40
332 How long do you want me to set the timer for? 1.4631 0.03548 352 223 95 34
333 Don't worry. I ate the evidence. 1.4631 0.03593 352 225 91 36
334 They want to fry you, but your lawyer can plea down to poaching. 1.4631 0.03660 352 228 85 39
335 I'm taking you to food court! 1.4629 0.03698 350 228 82 40
336 I hear the butcher and the candlestick maker are still at large. 1.4629 0.03720 350 229 80 41
337 Where did you hide the dough. 1.4629 0.03698 350 228 82 40
338 It's a work-farm-to-table concept. 1.4629 0.03539 350 221 96 33
339 I guess it really was a killer dessert. 1.4629 0.03653 350 226 86 38
340 Well done. 1.4613 0.03660 349 226 85 38
341 I warned you about poaching. 1.4611 0.03630 347 223 88 36
342 when the judge said you were going to serve 10 to 20 he didn't mean dinner. 1.4611 0.03607 347 222 90 35
343 The butcher and the candlestick maker set me up 1.4609 0.03714 345 225 81 39
344 They keep asking me where you hid the dough. 1.4609 0.03480 345 215 101 29
345 You told the teller you knead lots of dough? 1.4609 0.03737 345 226 79 40
346 We're having trouble raising the dough 1.4588 0.03731 340 222 80 38
347 You're too old for capers. 1.4586 0.03817 338 224 73 41
348 Yes—your goose is cooked. 1.4586 0.03747 338 221 79 38
349 They just flipped the Butcher. And, the Candlestick Maker says he'll sing for a deal." 1.4586 0.03747 338 221 79 38
350 I'm leaving, Gerard. You're sweet, but too unsavory. 1.4586 0.03555 338 213 95 30
351 I hope you learned your lesson about cooking the books. 1.4586 0.03555 338 213 95 30
352 Bad news...the butcher and the candelstick maker copped a plea and are singing like canaries. 1.4586 0.03840 338 225 71 42
353 Chef Boyardee in the can, I presume? 1.4586 0.03862 338 226 69 43
354 They're asking me how the dough doubled overnight. 1.4586 0.03723 338 220 81 37
355 Unfortunately, the Butcher and the Candlestick Maker have turned state's evidence against you. 1.4586 0.03723 338 220 81 37
356 They're saying you cooked the books. 1.4586 0.03555 338 213 95 30
357 I have a bun in the oven. It's yours. 1.4586 0.03676 338 218 85 35
358 Where did you put the spatula? 1.4583 0.03716 336 218 82 36
359 Tell me the secret ingredient or you can forget about the alibi. 1.4567 0.03699 335 217 83 35
360 You just had to go and whisk it all, didn't you? 1.4567 0.03723 335 218 81 36
361 Just tell the police where you hid the dough. 1.4565 0.03715 333 216 82 35
362 Bad news honey, your appeal was denied. They still can't believe it's not butter. 1.4565 0.03740 333 217 80 36
363 Well, dear, it was almost a perfect recipe for murder. 1.4565 0.03715 333 216 82 35
364 I told you “put herbs aside” not “herbicide”. 1.4562 0.03805 331 218 75 38
365 You're being transferred from medium security to well-done. 1.4559 0.03623 329 209 90 30
366 I’m only asking as your lawyer, did you beat the eggs? 1.4545 0.03589 330 209 92 29
367 The butcher’s dead. The candlestick-maker’s still on the lam. 1.4543 0.03950 328 222 63 43
368 Ok...so we re-name it "Prison Chef" and drop the location shooting. 1.4543 0.03630 328 209 89 30
369 They just arrested the Butcher and the Candlestick Maker. 1.4543 0.03878 328 219 69 40
370 At least they’re letting you cook your own last meal. 1.4543 0.03756 328 214 79 35
371 Just tell them where you hid the dough, Harold. 1.4543 0.03830 328 217 73 38
372 Cooked the books again, didn't you? 1.4543 0.03805 328 216 75 37
373 Thats a half-baked excuse if I ever heard one! 1.4543 0.03526 328 205 97 26
374 Your lawyer says your goose is cooked. 1.4543 0.03681 328 211 85 32
375 Yes, I know your pastries are to die for, but the State has to prove that. 1.4540 0.03432 326 200 104 22
376 The butcher and the candlestick maker ratted you out. 1.4540 0.03798 326 214 76 36
377 You only got ten days. It'll be over easy. 1.4540 0.03514 326 203 98 25
378 Ditch the uniform, Charlie. You're serving time, not dinner. 1.4537 0.03688 324 208 85 31
379 They've caught the gingerbread man and he's talking. 1.4537 0.03790 324 212 77 35
380 I'm sorry. I just can't raise the dough. 1.4537 0.03582 324 204 93 27
381 I don't think they mean that kind of shank. 1.4537 0.03713 324 209 83 32
382 I've found someone nouvelle. 1.4537 0.03609 324 205 91 28
383 They can make all the jokes they want about you being in the can, Im still Mrs. Boyardee! 1.4523 0.03574 325 205 93 27
384 They know about you not using real butter. 1.4517 0.03551 321 201 95 25
385 You'll need to do better than "I thought it was flour". 1.4517 0.03738 321 208 81 32
386 I knew you would end up in Unleavenworth. 1.4512 0.03680 328 212 84 32
387 The parole board can seat you ten years from Tuesday at either 4:30 or 10:45. 1.4511 0.03850 317 209 73 35
388 You thought it was ten kilos of oregano? 1.4511 0.03718 317 204 83 30
389 “Food to die for” is a figure of speech, Francois. 1.4490 0.03797 314 205 77 32
390 It will be another three years and 25 minutes 1.4490 0.03903 314 209 69 36
391 Don’t be discouraged, honey, just ask yourself: “What would Martha do?” 1.4490 0.03876 314 208 71 35
392 They wanna know where the dough is. 1.4487 0.03868 312 206 72 34
393 The lawyer thinks he can get you 25 to 30 minutes at 350° 1.4484 0.03832 310 203 75 32
394 Plead culinary insanity. 1.4481 0.03850 308 202 74 32
395 Everyone knew you were guilty. The proof was in your pudding. 1.4463 0.03803 307 200 77 30
396 You need to tell me where you hid the dough. 1.4463 0.03859 307 202 73 32
397 Either challenge the toughest guy in there to a bake-off or become somebody's sous chef. 1.4463 0.03803 307 200 77 30
398 You cooked the books? 1.4463 0.03886 307 203 71 33
399 They say you are going to fry 1.4463 0.03803 307 200 77 30
400 They just found the candlestick-maker washed ashore on Long Island. 1.4463 0.03803 307 200 77 30
401 So, "Food Critic Gets What's Coming To Him" is trending. 1.4463 0.03747 307 198 81 28
402 What did I tell you?!? This is what happens when you tell Russians that you work for the CIA, and don't clarify that you mean the Culinary Institute of America. 1.4459 0.03792 305 198 78 29
403 Of course the food here stinks !! You’re not really a chef. 1.4459 0.03877 305 201 72 32
404 I know this is hard to hear, but I've started going to a different restaurant. 1.4459 0.03706 305 195 84 26
405 The governor will grant a pardon in exchange for your recipe for Béarnaise sauce. 1.4459 0.03677 305 194 86 25
406 Fifteen years of marriage and NOW you learn to cook !? 1.4452 0.03998 301 202 64 35
407 ...and the butcher and candlestick maker have the dough. 1.4452 0.03970 301 201 66 34
408 Well, I still say she shouldn’t have ordered Death By Chocolate in the first place. 1.4452 0.04080 301 205 58 38
409 So apparently serving red wine with fish IS a crime. 1.4452 0.03799 301 195 78 28
410 So, where’s the dough ? 1.4452 0.03914 301 199 70 32
411 What can I say? You shouldn't have cooked the books. 1.4430 0.03971 298 199 66 33
412 Well at least you have your knife skills 1.4430 0.03826 298 194 76 28
413 They’re saying 25 to 30 or until you’re a golden brown. 1.4430 0.03942 298 198 68 32
414 I think you've carried walking in Martha Stewart's footsteps too far. 1.4426 0.04047 296 200 61 35
415 So you really meant it about that death by chocolate thing? 1.4426 0.03990 296 198 65 33
416 I put the file in. You don't have to critique the cake. 1.4426 0.03814 296 192 77 27
417 Your sous-chef ratatouilled you out. 1.4422 0.03892 294 193 72 29
418 Let's face it, Jules, you knew it was a recipe for disaster. 1.4422 0.03922 294 194 70 30
419 Judge, jury, everyone's a food critic. 1.4422 0.03892 294 193 72 29
420 He says you're the first one to ask for more thyme at sentencing. 1.4403 0.04048 293 198 61 34
421 Calling it Death by Chocolate is being seen as a confession. 1.4403 0.04048 293 198 61 34
422 Well Francois, I think we just tell the truth. The man you strangled was putting ketchup on Penne Arrabiata and drinking white wine. I'm hoping the judge is French. 1.4403 0.03810 293 190 77 26
423 "I'm not a cook" didn't work for Nixon either. 1.4399 0.03829 291 189 76 26
424 I told you that cooking the books was a recipe for disaster! 1.4399 0.03890 291 191 72 28
425 I warned you that the rules regarding French cuisine are very strict. 1.4399 0.03797 291 188 78 25
426 That's right, poaching. 1.4399 0.03671 291 184 86 21
427 So...where’d ya hide the dough? 1.4399 0.04069 291 197 60 34
428 I told you not to steal the Colonel's secret recipe. 1.4399 0.03797 291 188 78 25
429 I told you I would turn you in if you said "fusion" one more time. 1.4394 0.03970 289 192 67 30
430 They say you may get death by chocolate 1.4394 0.03878 289 189 73 27
431 The warden wishes to know if you'd like to cook your own last meal. 1.4394 0.04000 289 193 65 31
432 Bad news. The butcher and candlestick maker are singing like canaries. 1.4394 0.04060 289 195 61 33
433 The recipe for Death by Chocolate was meant to be whimsical. 1.4394 0.04089 289 196 59 34
434 On the bright side, maybe they'll let you prepare your own last meal. 1.4394 0.03752 289 185 81 23
435 You of all people should have known it was a half-baked idea. 1.4394 0.03847 289 188 75 26
436 So wait, I need butter, sugar, flour, and a file to bake a cake? 1.4390 0.03770 287 184 80 23
437 How much thyme do you have left? 1.4390 0.03738 287 183 82 22
438 As your attorney, I strongly advise you to spill the beans. 1.4390 0.03834 287 186 76 25
439 For you, of all people, to be caught with your hand in the cookie jar... 1.4390 0.03897 287 188 72 27
440 So it turns out the vegan police are real. 1.4390 0.03738 287 183 82 22
441 What does your attorney say now that the butcher and candlestick maker turned State’s evidence? 1.4390 0.04021 287 192 64 31
442 How were you to know there was someone inside the cake? 1.4390 0.04140 287 196 56 35
443 Was this the first time someone asked for ketchup? 1.4390 0.03990 287 191 66 30
444 l’ve set the timer for when you get out. 1.4390 0.03866 287 187 74 26
445 Apparently the proof wasn't just in the pudding. 1.4384 0.03910 292 193 70 29
446 Fine. The cake wasn't moist and fluffy. Next time, smuggle in your own file. 1.4366 0.03957 284 188 68 28
447 They found your fingerprints on all the knives. 1.4366 0.03957 284 188 68 28
448 I still don't understand why the judge sentenced you to thirteen years when the other guys only got twelve. 1.4366 0.04020 284 190 64 30
449 They tell me you'll be out in 45 minutes, then you'll have to rest covered in foil for 20 minutes 1.4366 0.04020 284 190 64 30
450 It’s not my fault the Butcher and the Candlestick Maker took plea deals... 1.4366 0.04172 284 195 54 35
451 The butcher and the candlestick maker wash up dead on shore; of course you’re the number one suspect. 1.4366 0.04201 284 196 52 36
452 If THIS president insists on his steak well done with ketchup, then that's what you give him! 1.4362 0.04009 282 188 65 29
453 They said you’re looking at 86,000 hours at 73 degrees. 1.4362 0.03977 282 187 67 28
454 They’ll probably leave you alone if you take off that hat. 1.4362 0.03945 282 186 69 27
455 How long had you known about the peas touching the carrots? 1.4362 0.03848 282 183 75 24
456 Bad news. Your goose is cooked! 1.4362 0.04040 282 189 63 30
457 The press is calling it a searing indictment. 1.4362 0.03782 282 181 79 22
458 They said you have to cook your own last meal. 1.4362 0.03945 282 186 69 27
459 I know I said I'd wait for you but I'm just going to order a pizza. 1.4362 0.03977 282 187 67 28
460 Arson charges aside, I felt the Bananas Foster was a bold choice. 1.4362 0.03913 282 185 71 26
461 Interesting, I thought most inmates turn to religion. 1.4362 0.03782 282 181 79 22
462 I always knew you were cooking the books. 1.4362 0.04009 282 188 65 29
463 They offer you 6 months for poaching. 1.4362 0.03945 282 186 69 27
464 The lawyer says the "Must have been something they ate" defense won't work. 1.4362 0.04009 282 188 65 29
465 I bought a microwave. And I like it. 1.4362 0.03848 282 183 75 24
466 'Hey, you try being Mrs. Boyardee out here in the world, sweetie!" 1.4359 0.04072 273 182 63 28
467 Tell me again, how do I set the clock on the microwave? 1.4357 0.03998 280 186 66 28
468 They're still searching for the butcher and the candlestickmaker. 1.4353 0.03887 278 181 73 24
469 We'd like to get you out but we're having trouble raising the dough. 1.4353 0.03819 278 179 77 22
470 I think I see now why you were transferred to Leavenworth. 1.4353 0.03920 278 182 71 25
471 No updates from the lawyer. I just came to get your coq au vin recipe. 1.4353 0.03853 278 180 75 23
472 You robbed a bank with a croissant, Harold. They're charging you for assault with a breadly weapon. 1.4353 0.04050 278 186 63 29
473 Next time don’t cook the books. 1.4353 0.03920 278 182 71 25
474 What am I supposed to do for dinner? 1.4353 0.03853 278 180 75 23
475 I did tell them it's spelled S T O L L E N. 1.4353 0.03920 278 182 71 25
476 We're trying to get your sentence reduced to thyme served. 1.4353 0.03785 278 178 79 21
477 The proof was in the pudding. 1.4353 0.03853 278 180 75 23
478 I'm new at this speed dating thing. Can I get fries with that? 1.4342 0.03857 281 183 74 24
479 If only you hadn't wanted your cake and Edith, too. 1.4337 0.04071 279 188 61 30
480 You've made your cake, now eat it! I told you, you should have been a butcher or a candlestick maker! 1.4332 0.04028 277 185 64 28
481 The file is inside the jaune d’oeuf just tiede, sur une fueille de blette, pommes mitraille mitonees au jus de boutons cremeux, croustille de topinambour, bouilon a l’infusion de Comte’ de la famille Badoz 1.4327 0.04081 275 185 61 29
482 The butcher and the candlestick maker ratted you out. 1.4327 0.04241 275 190 51 34
483 As long as there is a file in it, you really shouldn't care what kind of cake I am baking for you. 1.4327 0.03847 275 178 75 22
484 When you said you were going to the cooler, this was not what I had in mind. 1.4327 0.03915 275 180 71 24
485 Why didn’t you just let him have his cake and eat it too? 1.4327 0.04049 275 184 63 28
486 And they found your stash of gluten. 1.4327 0.03915 275 180 71 24
487 No, dear, the proof wasn't in that pudding. 1.4327 0.04146 275 187 57 31
488 Perhaps we should remove “A Pot Roast to Die For” from the menu. 1.4327 0.03881 275 179 73 23
489 So it really IS a crime to serve a steak well done. 1.4327 0.03742 275 175 81 19
490 The lawyer said yes, serving the wrong wine with a meal in Manhattan is a crime. 1.4327 0.03915 275 180 71 24
491 The plan was to steal bullion, not bouillon. 1.4327 0.03777 275 176 79 20
492 Your sous chef has been standing in for you around the house. The kids prefer his fresh approach and nonconventional style. 1.4327 0.03949 275 181 69 25
493 They’re charging you with a salted batter. 1.4317 0.04024 271 180 65 26
494 What do you mean when you say you're in for 10-15 at 425° ? 1.4317 0.03886 271 176 73 22
495 So how's the food here? 1.4317 0.03990 271 179 67 25
496 You were right. It was a recipe for disaster. 1.4317 0.04125 271 183 59 29
497 You're not worried people will think you're being ironic if we put the cage-free chicken on the menu? 1.4302 0.04054 265 176 64 25
498 What proof? I ate the pudding. 1.4296 0.03965 270 178 68 24
499 I was hoping they'e make you take off the stupid hat 1.4291 0.03915 268 175 71 22
500 The boys want to know where you hid the dough. 1.4291 0.03985 268 177 67 24
501 The surviving guests thought the 'Chef's Surprise' was quite innovative. 1.4291 0.03947 275 182 68 25
502 The lawyer said that maybe he can prove his head was already in the oven. 1.4286 0.03862 266 172 74 20
503 How will I know when you’re done? 1.4280 0.03992 264 174 67 23
504 I'm having trouble raising dough for your bail. 1.4280 0.03955 264 173 69 22
505 I told you to take death by chocolate off the menu. 1.4280 0.04063 264 176 63 25
506 So you cooked the books, too? 1.4280 0.04099 264 177 61 26
507 It was one Yelp review, Gerald. 1.4280 0.04028 264 175 65 24
508 Find the biggest, meanest-looking guy and bake him a soufflé. 1.4280 0.03955 264 173 69 22
509 The lawyer says your books are cooked and so is your goose. 1.4280 0.03992 264 174 67 23
510 The butcher and the candlestick maker are cooperating with the D.A. 1.4280 0.04063 264 176 63 25
511 Leavenworth 1.4280 0.04028 264 175 65 24
512 No, I can't bring you your knives. 1.4280 0.04063 264 176 63 25
513 Just labeling the soup Deathcap Mushroom is apparently not enough of a disclaimer. 1.4280 0.03807 264 169 77 18
514 Where'd you hide the dough? 1.4280 0.04168 264 179 57 28
515 I begged you not to take the White House chef job! 1.4280 0.04468 264 188 39 37
516 If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere. 1.4280 0.03992 264 174 67 23
517 The bad news: they denied your appeal. The good news: they loved your souffle and they say you've got a job ... for life. 1.4280 0.03992 264 174 67 23
518 I told you poaching was a crime. 1.4280 0.03992 264 174 67 23
519 I warned you about cooking the books. 1.4280 0.03992 264 174 67 23
520 I'm pretty sure that, in here, 'hot buns' is just a single entendre. 1.4280 0.04099 264 177 61 26
521 So unfortunately you're going to have to prepare you own last meal. 1.4275 0.04226 262 179 54 29
522 So far they can't find the one-armed Gingerbread Man 1.4269 0.04035 260 172 65 23
523 Look on the bright side. You always said that cooking was a lifelong commitment. 1.4253 0.04059 261 174 63 24
524 I told you you should have left the White House when the Mooch did... 1.4253 0.04131 261 176 59 26
525 They're charging you with 350 degree muder. 1.4253 0.04095 261 175 61 25
526 They claim you knew the arugula wasn't locally sourced. 1.4253 0.04202 261 178 55 28
527 The President says you can have a pardon, but only if you agree to be Secretary of State. 1.4247 0.04189 259 176 56 27
528 The butcher and the candlestick maker got off scot-free. 1.4247 0.04081 259 173 62 24
529 In 25 years you didn't bake me a cake, now you expect me to bake you one? 1.4247 0.04007 259 171 66 22
530 Yes, it is a crime to put ketchup on pastrami and rye. 1.4247 0.04044 259 172 64 23
531 Since you left, the Michelin Guide gave us another star. 1.4247 0.04081 259 173 62 24
532 Oh Tony, 'poisson' is spelled with 2 ss. 1.4247 0.04154 259 175 58 26
533 The judge says your goose is cooked. 1.4247 0.04117 259 174 60 25
534 I'm the one who called them, Pierre. You weren't washing your hands. 1.4247 0.04154 259 175 58 26
535 You should never have accepted a job as White House chef in the Trump administration. 1.4247 0.04081 259 173 62 24
536 I need your meatloaf recipe. 1.4241 0.04177 257 174 57 26
537 It WAS a killer recipe. 1.4235 0.04088 255 170 62 23
538 What? Aggravated salt...and buttery? 1.4235 0.04380 255 178 46 31
539 I'm sorry dear,,,no more conjugal visits. Last time you gave me a yeast infection. 1.4235 0.04088 255 170 62 23
540 Sounds like another recipe for disaster. 1.4235 0.04050 255 169 64 22
541 I've found someone else to toss my salad. 1.4235 0.04200 255 173 56 26
542 I think we might be able get the sentence down to thyme served 1.4235 0.04050 255 169 64 22
543 Bad news, the butcher and candlestick maker turned states evidence. 1.4235 0.04200 255 173 56 26
544 Don't feel bad. Prisoners aren't supposed to like the food. 1.4235 0.03934 255 166 70 19
545 That's right. I am now with the Muffin Man. 1.4235 0.03895 255 165 72 18
546 How many times did I tell you, go to McDonalds and pick up cheeseburgers. The president doesn't like real food. 1.4235 0.04200 255 173 56 26
547 I knew they'd give you thyme after all those capers on the lamb. 1.4235 0.04345 255 177 48 30
548 We both knew it was only a matter of time before your half-baked schemes would land you here. 1.4229 0.04334 253 175 49 29
549 The lawyer says you have to come up with more dough. 1.4229 0.03916 253 164 71 18
550 The newspapers say you're going to fry. 1.4223 0.04095 251 167 62 22
551 Your appeal was denied. Too many negative reviews on Yelp. 1.4223 0.03936 251 163 70 18
552 No dear, I ‘m positive I told you to leave the gun, and take the cannoli . 1.4206 0.03964 252 165 68 19
553 Well now your goose is really cooked. 1.4206 0.04159 252 170 58 24
554 Not pesticide you nitwit. I wanted pesto on the side. 1.4206 0.04159 252 170 58 24
555 It's not like I'm asking for your password. I just want your meatloaf recipe. 1.4206 0.04043 252 167 64 21
556 It turns out there IS a law against putting mayonnaise in guacamole. 1.4206 0.04159 252 170 58 24
557 Well, it's not as if you don't have time to make it from scratch. 1.4206 0.04159 252 170 58 24
558 Are you still serving thyme? 1.4200 0.04105 250 167 61 22
559 ...so it's 3 cups of flour, 2 cups sugar, 1 hacksaw, 4 eggs, and 2 tablespoons of baking powder 1.4200 0.04105 250 167 61 22
560 Yes, yes. It was a killer souffle. 1.4200 0.03945 250 163 69 18
561 And yesterday Junior announced he is gluten free. 1.4200 0.03986 250 164 67 19
562 Unfortunately the judge had eaten in your restaurant. 1.4200 0.04066 250 166 63 21
563 Your best chance is to pick out the biggest one and absolutely make him your sous chef. 1.4200 0.04026 250 165 65 20
564 When you told me you 'beat Bobby Flay", I totally misunderstood you. 1.4200 0.04105 250 167 61 22
565 Bad news. The chicken agreed to testify. 1.4200 0.03945 250 163 69 18
566 The DA will knock it down to a misdemeanor if you testify against the butcher and the candlestick maker. 1.4200 0.04144 250 168 59 23
567 It looks really bad. The butcher and the candlestick maker rolled over on you. 1.4200 0.04443 250 176 43 31
568 I told you 'Death by Chocolate' was a bad idea. 1.4200 0.04183 250 169 57 24
569 The D.A. wants to see you fry. 1.4200 0.04221 250 170 55 25
570 Oh Hector, I thought ‘cooking the books’ was just an expression! 1.4200 0.04333 250 173 49 28
571 You knew that potato was loaded, didn't you?!! 1.4194 0.04245 248 169 54 25
572 I'm sorry sir, but it looks like the butcher and the candlestick maker have turned state's evidence. 1.4194 0.04433 248 174 44 30
573 Is the money still in the hat? 1.4187 0.03862 246 158 73 15
574 'I've taken 'Death By Chocolate' off the menu." 1.4187 0.04270 246 168 53 25
575 They say you’re gonna fry for this! 1.4187 0.04270 246 168 53 25
576 "I think the recipe actually said to "muddle the herbs", not "murder Herb". 1.4187 0.04071 246 163 63 20
577 And then you said, "What's somebody going to do - call the Napoletana Pizza Police on me?" 1.4187 0.04151 246 165 59 22
578 The police found the victim boneless, skinless and stuffed in a freezer. 1.4187 0.04191 246 166 57 23
579 How many times did he send the shrimp scampi back before you hit him? 1.4180 0.04135 244 163 60 21
580 You should know, I’ve made risotto with your brother. 1.4174 0.04240 242 164 55 23
581 Good news. They've reduced your charges to assault with a deadly capon. 1.4156 0.04306 243 167 51 25
582 The good news is that the judge will allow you to cook your own last meal 1.4156 0.04384 243 169 47 27
583 The four and twenty blackbirds were an endangered species. 1.4156 0.04145 243 163 59 21
584 They are taking health inspections pretty seriously these days 1.4156 0.03891 243 157 71 15
585 I warned you against cooking the books... 1.4156 0.04306 243 167 51 25
586 So when is too much butter a crime? 1.4149 0.04210 241 163 56 22
587 You probably shouldn't tell your inmates you were the Cupcake King. 1.4149 0.03912 241 156 70 15
588 There wasn't a scintilla of evidence against you, until you started cooking the books. 1.4149 0.04371 241 167 48 26
589 The turkey was pardoned, you weren't. 1.4149 0.04085 241 160 62 19
590 Enough about capers, where's the dough? 1.4149 0.04042 241 159 64 18
591 Is is true you were cooking the books? 1.4149 0.04169 241 162 58 21
592 That's not what they meant by 'Beat Bobby Flay.' 1.4149 0.04449 241 169 44 28
593 Yes. I made sure your goose is cooked. 1.4149 0.04449 241 169 44 28
594 Accept it --- Your vichyssoise really WAS criminal. 1.4149 0.04251 241 164 54 23
595 The butcher and the candlestick maker have already confessed to what happened in that tub. 1.4149 0.04127 241 161 60 20
596 they still want to know where you stashed the dough! 1.4149 0.04169 241 162 58 21
597 I’m afraid your goose is cooked. 1.4149 0.04251 241 164 54 23
598 Apparently, serving Manhattan clam chowder in New England is now a felony. 1.4149 0.04127 241 161 60 20
599 I warned you that those four and twenty blackbirds would sing. 1.4149 0.04331 241 166 50 25
600 The good news is you'll only be in for another two and a half hours. The bad news is the temperature is being set at 375 degrees. 1.4149 0.04127 241 161 60 20
601 I'm sorry. Your goose is cooked. 1.4149 0.04127 241 161 60 20
602 When the reviewer said your food was " to die for", I thought it was a compliment. 1.4149 0.04169 241 162 58 21
603 Who'd have thought, 5-10 years for cooking the books. 1.4149 0.04210 241 163 56 22
604 How much thyme do you have left? 1.4149 0.04210 241 163 56 22
605 The Butcher and the Candlestick Maker are pinning it on you. 1.4149 0.04410 241 168 46 27
606 Apparently, they saw your fruit cake and they think it's stollen. 1.4149 0.04169 241 162 58 21
607 Your fingerprints were all over the dough. 1.4149 0.04251 241 164 54 23
608 'Did you really cook the books?' 1.4149 0.04291 241 165 52 24
609 So...they let you keep the hat. 1.4149 0.04085 241 160 62 19
610 Jacques, please don't send another Chocolate Bombe to the Parole Commission. Not helpful. 1.4149 0.04127 241 161 60 20
611 Bad news -- the butcher and the candlestick maker both deny that you were with them. 1.4149 0.04526 241 171 40 30
612 Your goose is cooked! They’re going to grill you until they get a half-baked confession, then you’re gonna fry! 1.4149 0.04210 241 163 56 22
613 I’m sorry Paul, but I’m leaving you for Jacques. He’s a cage-free chef. 1.4149 0.04371 241 167 48 26
614 I assured the lawyer that you can raise the dough. 1.4149 0.03999 241 158 66 17
615 How's the cuisine in there? Haute? Or not so haute? 1.4142 0.04021 239 157 65 17
616 They’re convinced that you’re the one who cooked up the scheme. 1.4142 0.04193 239 161 57 21
617 Nice try, but Trump survived. 1.4135 0.04544 237 168 40 29
618 Quite ironic, don’t you think, that in 10 years you’ll be the one coming out of the can. 1.4128 0.04199 235 158 57 20
619 It's not called "free range" in court. It's called "bail". 1.4128 0.04285 235 160 53 22
620 They say you also cooked the books. 1.4120 0.04479 233 163 44 26
621 You seriously want me to smuggle you a lemon zester hidden in a cake? 1.4120 0.04479 233 163 44 26
622 How much thyme are they giving you? 1.4120 0.04090 233 154 62 17
623 They claim you're the one who spoiled the broth. 1.4120 0.04268 233 158 54 21
624 Bad news. The parole board said you didn’t serve enough thyme. 1.4120 0.04311 233 159 52 22
625 Look on the bright side, it was a killer dinner. 1.4120 0.03999 233 152 66 15
626 Does the gun go in before or after the butter? 1.4120 0.04268 233 158 54 21
627 You're being charged with baking and entering. 1.4120 0.04353 233 160 50 23
628 The kids are fine. They're happy they can pronounce the names of their dinners now. 1.4120 0.04224 233 157 56 20
629 I don't care that your cellmates call you "fun" names like Chef Boyardee and the Barefoot Confessa. Your sentence ends tomorrow and I expect you to come home. 1.4118 0.04118 238 159 60 19
630 Alright, where did you put the dough? 1.4107 0.04343 224 152 52 20
631 Sorry, honey. I couldn't raise the dough. 1.4095 0.04235 232 157 55 20
632 Honey, it's an innocent mistake--poisson, not poison. 1.4095 0.04235 232 157 55 20
633 No William, I will not press my buns against the window. 1.4095 0.04491 232 163 43 26
634 Well, maybe they’ll let you out for thyme served. 1.4095 0.04322 232 159 51 22
635 I wasn't being literal when I asked you to make my mother a souffle. 1.4095 0.04365 232 160 49 23
636 The good and bad news is that your goose is cooked. 1.4095 0.04235 232 157 55 20
637 They're saying you did it in the kitchen with a spatula. 1.4089 0.04373 225 154 50 21
638 So what's the food like. 1.4087 0.04170 230 154 58 18
639 No I haven’t told them where you stashed the dough! 1.4087 0.04348 230 158 50 22
640 Do I add the file before or after the butter and eggs? 1.4087 0.04078 230 152 62 16
641 Under the circumstances, naming your dessert 'Death by Chocolate' was probably not the smartest idea 1.4087 0.04392 230 159 48 23
642 I tried to tell you “The Great American Bake Off” competition wasn’t to the death, but you wouldn’t listen! 1.4087 0.04124 230 153 60 17
643 You have to tell me where you hid the dough. 1.4087 0.04392 230 159 48 23
644 Yes, Death by Chocolate did sound delicious. 1.4087 0.04170 230 154 58 18
645 Look, I had the same soup you gave the judge and I'd say you got off easy. 1.4087 0.04078 230 152 62 16
646 I'm the sous-public defender. 1.4087 0.04260 230 156 54 20
647 We’re trying to buy you more thyme. 1.4087 0.04170 230 154 58 18
648 I told you it was a crime to charge that much for a slice of toast with mashed avocado. 1.4081 0.04116 223 147 61 15
649 I always said ‘cage-free’ only. Now, look at you. 1.4081 0.04261 223 150 55 18
650 Say, have you heard the latest one about you? People are saying if you make your own last meal, the execution will take care of itself. 1.4079 0.04419 228 158 47 23
651 You're going to be featured on 'Diners, Drive-byes, and Dives'. 1.4079 0.04375 228 157 49 22
652 You’re telling me the butler did it? 1.4079 0.04102 228 151 61 16
653 They say you're a cereal offender 1.4071 0.04312 226 154 52 20
654 The only way you're going to survive in there is by becoming someone's sous bitch. 1.4062 0.04475 224 156 45 23
655 I know at 350, but for how long? 1.4062 0.04385 224 154 49 21
656 So, did you spill the beans, or not? 1.4062 0.04430 224 155 47 22
657 What you did to that steak IS a crime and the jury agreed with me. 1.4062 0.04430 224 155 47 22
658 I miss your wiener. 1.4062 0.04519 224 157 43 24
659 Honey, for the kids sake, please just admit you know the Muffin Man! 1.4062 0.04385 224 154 49 21
660 Who knew it was an actual crime to serve ketchup with filet mignon? 1.4062 0.04198 224 150 57 17
661 I've been seeing someone. On the side. 1.4062 0.03952 224 145 67 12
662 The parole board passed you up, but they did give you a Michelin star. 1.4062 0.04292 224 152 53 19
663 I told you not to get involved with the Butcher and Candlestick Maker. 1.4062 0.04292 224 152 53 19
664 You won't get a reduction for thyme served. 1.4062 0.04198 224 150 57 17
665 I told you, honey, there's no such thing as the perfect crème. 1.4062 0.04339 224 153 51 20
666 I’ve found another restaurant. 1.4062 0.04339 224 153 51 20
667 I warned you that all those capers would bring nothing but trouble 1.4062 0.04339 224 153 51 20
668 How the hell am I going to get you coriander! 1.4062 0.04292 224 152 53 19
669 I'm leaving you for the Dumb Waiter. 1.4062 0.04385 224 154 49 21
670 Do you know your Marinara rights? 1.4062 0.04519 224 157 43 24
671 I have a bun in the oven. 1.4054 0.04271 222 150 54 18
672 But darling, revenge is better served cold. 1.4054 0.04175 222 148 58 16
673 I'm sorry you had to find out like this, but since you've been in, I've been ordering takeout. 1.4054 0.04458 222 154 46 22
674 You don’t think bringing a cake to a baker will look suspicious? 1.4054 0.04504 222 155 44 23
675 Those critics don't mess around. 1.4054 0.04076 222 146 62 14
676 I should have paid closer attention when you told me you really kneaded the dough. 1.4054 0.04076 222 146 62 14
677 Prison food IS the punisment! 1.4054 0.04126 222 147 60 15
678 Ron, look, you couldn't have known about his nut allergy....right? ....Ron? 1.4054 0.04319 222 151 52 19
679 The good news is you only got three years. Bad news is you lost a Michelin Star. 1.4054 0.04126 222 147 60 15
680 On the bright side, the police couldn't believe I got a hacksaw in a croissant. 1.4054 0.04319 222 151 52 19
681 He insulted your risotto; of course he deserved to die! 1.4054 0.04458 222 154 46 22
682 It's no good, Dear. They're still insisting that you cooked the books. 1.4054 0.04366 222 152 50 20
683 Bad news: the judge rejected our request for thyme served. 1.4054 0.04458 222 154 46 22
684 Red wine with fish?!... what were you thinking? 1.4054 0.04366 222 152 50 20
685 No, I DO NOT have a reservation. 1.4054 0.04271 222 150 54 18
686 I thought you meant the other CIA... 1.4054 0.04412 222 153 48 21
687 I thought by now you'd realize, there ain't no way to hide your lyonnaise. 1.4054 0.04458 222 154 46 22
688 I told you a blowfish restaurant was a terrible idea. 1.4027 0.04282 221 150 53 18
689 I think I joined the wrong CIA. 1.4027 0.04330 221 151 51 19
690 You were right. Your soufflé was to die for. 1.4027 0.04234 221 149 55 17
691 Yes, I suppose a file would ruin the cake, but I think you're missing the point. 1.4027 0.04282 221 150 53 18
692 They said you're looking at ten to a baker's dozen. 1.4027 0.04330 221 151 51 19
693 Bad news. Your lawyer ran off with all the dough. 1.4027 0.04377 221 152 49 20
694 The DA says you’ve had your fingers in one too many pies. 1.4027 0.04424 221 153 47 21
695 Sorry... they're saying life without the possibility of profiterole. 1.4027 0.04516 221 155 43 23
696 Look at the bright side- the review said the food was to die for. 1.4027 0.04330 221 151 51 19
697 The Prosecutor says you're going to fry. 1.4027 0.04424 221 153 47 21
698 I will bake your cake with a file in it but I refuse to use fondant. 1.4027 0.04234 221 149 55 17
699 Don't worry dear, you should be out in 45-60 minutes. 1.4027 0.04086 221 146 61 14
700 I've been seeing other menus. 1.4027 0.04282 221 150 53 18
701 I said Chef Maurice's souffle was to die for, not to kill for. 1.4027 0.04377 221 152 49 20
702 Well it looked like flour to me! 1.4027 0.04377 221 152 49 20
703 They say you went off half baked 1.4027 0.04330 221 151 51 19
704 If you plead guilty to impersonating a chef they'll give you back your hot dog cart. 1.4027 0.04470 221 154 45 22
705 The Appeals Court held that you got your just desserts. 1.4027 0.04282 221 150 53 18
706 You look done to me. 1.4027 0.04282 221 150 53 18
707 If you confess to the whipping, they'll dismiss the beating. 1.4027 0.04185 221 148 57 16
708 So, do I add the sugar before or after chisel? 1.4027 0.04377 221 152 49 20
709 Sorry dear, but a bad review doesn't make it 'justifiable homicide'. 1.4027 0.03984 221 144 65 12
710 I don't think I can raise that kind of dough. 1.4019 0.04329 214 145 52 17
711 The public exposure charge is your fault. I swear I said masticate 1.4018 0.04309 219 149 52 18
712 They turned down your parole application. The warden likes your souffles. 1.4018 0.04499 219 153 44 22
713 I’m sorry, but they say you’re gonna fry. 1.4009 0.04236 217 146 55 16
714 Will you stop putting pineapple on pizza when you are released? 1.4000 0.04263 215 145 54 16
715 They want to call it "Prison Chef". Kind of a Birdman of Alcatraz meets Martha Stewart. 1.4000 0.04211 215 144 56 15
716 Please stop. I didn't come to listen to your problems. I'm having the Rothman's over and need the recipe to your mushroom barley soup. 1.3991 0.04341 213 145 51 17
717 And you thought that death by chocolate would be a perfect crime. 1.3991 0.04491 213 148 45 20
718 You’re the one who cooked the books. 1.3991 0.04491 213 148 45 20
719 Didn't I warn you about cooking the books? 1.3991 0.04442 213 147 47 19
720 Oh, for Pete's sake, swallow your pride and use the "Twinkie defense." 1.3991 0.04442 213 147 47 19
721 Sorry, I told the police you were the bombe expert. 1.3991 0.04589 213 150 41 22
722 You've got to tell me where you hid the rest of the dough. 1.3991 0.04442 213 147 47 19
723 How's the food dear? 1.3991 0.04442 213 147 47 19
724 I understand that on fridays you get to wear whatever you like but Phil... you’re a dentist. 1.3991 0.04391 213 146 49 18
725 I'm leaving you and taking all the recipes. 1.3991 0.04132 213 141 59 13
726 The butcher’s not talking, and the candlestick maker’s on the lam. 1.3991 0.04185 213 142 57 14
727 But when did using Cream of Mushroom soup in a recipe become a crime? 1.3991 0.04237 213 143 55 15
728 I'm leaving you for the candlestick maker 1.3991 0.04237 213 143 55 15
729 Where's the dough? 1.3991 0.04341 213 145 51 17
730 When were you taken into custardy? 1.3991 0.04391 213 146 49 18
731 I begged you not to cook the books. 1.3991 0.04391 213 146 49 18
732 Are they asking you to make your own last meal? 1.3991 0.04341 213 145 51 17
733 The lawyer says your goose is cooked.' 1.3991 0.04637 213 151 39 23
734 So, where do they have you working? 1.3991 0.04237 213 143 55 15
735 Let's clarify. 1.3981 0.04368 211 144 50 17
736 You are being charged with obstruction of arteries. 1.3981 0.04211 211 141 56 14
737 Seriously, a serrated knife? 1.3981 0.04211 211 141 56 14
738 So how long do I bake it after I put the file in? 1.3981 0.04264 211 142 54 15
739 Well what did you expect Jack? The proof was in the pudding. 1.3981 0.04620 211 149 40 22
740 The next time a customer wants to talk to the chef, leave your knife in the kitchen. 1.3981 0.04420 211 145 48 18
741 Don't worry. I set the timer. 1.3981 0.04264 211 142 54 15
742 I'm leaving you for Boyardee 1.3981 0.04317 211 143 52 16
743 The President said he would consider a pardon if you agreed with his menu suggestions. 1.3981 0.04211 211 141 56 14
744 They're charging you with 350 degree muder. 1.3961 0.04426 207 142 48 17
745 We didn't realize you literally meant the chocolate mousse recipe was to die for 1.3952 0.04380 210 144 49 17
746 The jury has food poisoning. 1.3952 0.04730 210 151 35 24
747 I'm sorry, but literally every prospective juror we've interviewed is on a gluten-free diet. 1.3952 0.04328 210 143 51 16
748 I'd bake a cake and conceal a file, but you'd complain it lacks "moistness and texture." 1.3952 0.04328 210 143 51 16
749 You finally got your just desserts. 1.3952 0.04221 210 141 55 14
750 Dark web, Bitcoin, foie gras...who are you, Pierre? 1.3952 0.04778 210 152 33 25
751 Have you considered what your last meal should be? 1.3952 0.04483 210 146 45 19
752 He said you can’t rub your meat in public anymore. 1.3952 0.04328 210 143 51 16
753 Look inside the cake. 1.3952 0.04380 210 144 49 17
754 You're a baker, not a butcher. 1.3952 0.04328 210 143 51 16
755 Will they at least let you prepare your last meal? 1.3952 0.04432 210 145 47 18
756 We've been playing with a number of names for it. How does "Crime Brulee" grab you? 1.3942 0.04192 208 139 56 13
757 I just don't get it, Stefan... how could they accuse you of cooking the books?!? 1.3942 0.04355 208 142 50 16
758 I guess it really was to die for 1.3942 0.04355 208 142 50 16
759 Please tell me you used real mayonnaise. 1.3942 0.04512 208 145 44 19
760 "Beat Bobby Flay" was just a metaphor. 1.3942 0.04408 208 143 48 17
761 I took your Killer Calamari off the menu. 1.3942 0.04302 208 141 52 15
762 You might want to reconsider how you dress for trial—you’re being charged with cannibalism. 1.3942 0.04664 208 148 38 22
763 The goose has a very good lawyer. 1.3942 0.04564 208 146 42 20
764 How many will you be serving? 1.3942 0.04355 208 142 50 16
765 Is it true what people are saying, Harry? Were you cooking the books? 1.3942 0.04192 208 139 56 13
766 You want a file so bad, bake your own lousy cake. 1.3942 0.04461 208 144 46 18
767 Wouldn't a cake be a little obvious? 1.3942 0.04192 208 139 56 13
768 Bad new - Both the butcher and the candlestick maker stuck deals with the prosecutor. 1.3942 0.04763 208 150 34 24
769 I'm tired of being battered. 1.3942 0.04302 208 141 52 15
770 Grandma says she forgives you for stealing her brisket recipe but the DA won't budge. 1.3942 0.04247 208 140 54 14
771 Serving red wine with fish IS a crime! 1.3942 0.04614 208 147 40 21
772 Do you have any prior confections? 1.3942 0.04302 208 141 52 15
773 No, I didn't bring your French double-slotted spoon! 1.3942 0.04512 208 145 44 19
774 You can beat this...or at least whisk it. 1.3942 0.04408 208 143 48 17
775 You knew he had a nut allergy? 1.3942 0.04408 208 143 48 17
776 The victim’s family said they hope you bake in hell. 1.3942 0.04137 208 138 58 12
777 The reviews said you killed it. 1.3942 0.04512 208 145 44 19
778 Didn't I tell you? The president ALWAYS gets two scoops, not just one. You KNEW that. 1.3942 0.04512 208 145 44 19
779 Yes... I think this will definitely have an impact on our Yelp reviews. 1.3942 0.04247 208 140 54 14
780 They're saying you cooked the books. 1.3942 0.04512 208 145 44 19
781 So how's the food? 1.3942 0.04408 208 143 48 17
782 Everybody has been raving about the restaurant recently. 1.3932 0.04490 206 143 45 18
783 Nice try, but my mother is recovering. 1.3930 0.04460 201 138 47 16
784 It’s pretty incriminating, Tommy. They found the rolling pin in the glove compartment…with your floury fingerprints all over it. 1.3923 0.04065 209 138 60 11
785 You were right, your Boeuf Bourguignon was to die for. 1.3922 0.04521 204 142 44 18
786 Can't take the heat? 1.3922 0.04521 204 142 44 18
787 I warned you that people take the Times review seriously. 1.3913 0.04202 207 139 55 13
788 Looks like your goose is cooked, Henri. 1.3911 0.04386 202 138 49 15
789 Great! Now all we need are the Butcher and the Candlestick Maker to come clean... 1.3911 0.04658 202 143 39 20
790 Ok but do I put the knife in before or after I bake the cake. 1.3911 0.04442 202 139 47 16
791 They said I was resisting a roast 1.3911 0.04442 202 139 47 16
792 They'll grant you parole if you just admit that you used high fructose corn syrup. 1.3911 0.04551 202 141 43 18
793 Make this easier on everyone and tell them the secret to the sauce. 1.3911 0.04386 202 138 49 15
794 Idiot! I WARNED you that you’d end up in Cook County Jail! 1.3911 0.04442 202 139 47 16
795 Just tell me where you stashed the dough! 1.3911 0.04965 202 149 27 26
796 You still have four years left on your timer. 1.3900 0.04415 200 137 48 15
797 "Take the cake' is just an expression, George 1.3900 0.04527 200 139 44 17
798 Liver, fava beans, and chianti are strictly circumstantial, what else do they have? 1.3900 0.04527 200 139 44 17
799 So you took the gun and left the cannoli? 1.3900 0.04691 200 142 38 20
800 When you said you'd come up with a way to make a lot of dough I thought -- 1.3900 0.04415 200 137 48 15
801 Don't worry. At least nine other people have also confessed to murdering Gordon Ramsay. 1.3900 0.04415 200 137 48 15
802 I left the gun. I ate the cannoli. 1.3900 0.04691 200 142 38 20
803 They said you were cooking the books. 1.3900 0.04797 200 144 34 22
804 No, of course they won't let you have your knife set. 1.3900 0.04415 200 137 48 15
805 Death by chocolate was meant to be a euphemism. 1.3900 0.04691 200 142 38 20
806 Does the file go in before or after the eggs? 1.3900 0.04527 200 139 44 17
807 Gordon Ramsay is on the jury... 1.3900 0.04472 200 138 46 16
808 'Cooking the books isn't really a defense...' 1.3900 0.04241 200 134 54 12
809 Serving thyme? 1.3889 0.04724 198 141 37 20
810 As White House chef, you actually thought it would be funny if Hillary popped out? 1.3889 0.04832 198 143 33 22
811 At least the jury all agreed that you make a killer souffle. 1.3889 0.04614 198 139 41 18
812 Your lawyer says you might get time off for gourmet behavior. 1.3889 0.04502 198 137 45 16
813 Sorry baby, I couldn’t raise the dough. 1.3889 0.04670 198 140 39 19
814 They want to know where you hid the dough. 1.3889 0.04614 198 139 41 18
815 Upshot is, you knew the lobster was alive... 1.3889 0.04445 198 136 47 15
816 I don't think we can get you off. "Death By Chocolate" was on the menu. 1.3889 0.04445 198 136 47 15
817 I'm afraid the warden said I can't bring your knife set. You'll just have to find another hobby. 1.3889 0.04445 198 136 47 15
818 You were right about the bisque--it did kill the competition. 1.3881 0.04618 201 142 40 19
819 We all have our problems, and yours is getting that cake to my house by 2:00 Saturday! 1.3878 0.04356 196 133 50 13
820 They're trying to reduce the charge to aggravated salting and buttering. 1.3878 0.04475 196 135 46 15
821 The good news: Your book is a best seller! 1.3878 0.04416 196 134 48 14
822 They have you making pizzas instead of license plates? 1.3878 0.04296 196 132 52 12
823 I guess the proof was in the pudding 1.3878 0.04647 196 138 40 18
824 I agree with the Times, your blanquette de veau was criminal. 1.3878 0.04475 196 135 46 15
825 California law requires 10 years per ounce of gluten, but we're trying to get it reduced. 1.3878 0.04234 196 131 54 11
826 I said you didn't knead the dough. 1.3858 0.04738 197 141 36 20
827 The kids want me to ask for your recipe for those brownies you make. 1.3858 0.04514 197 137 44 16
828 I told you the mystery meat would be a problem some day. 1.3858 0.04217 197 132 54 11
829 Table 9 is still waiting for their appetizer... 1.3858 0.04398 197 135 48 14
830 Looks like you'll have to stay in for another 5 or 10. 1.3846 0.04660 195 138 39 18
831 I told you the gluten-free people were serious. 1.3846 0.04487 195 135 45 15
832 What are you making for your last meal? 1.3846 0.04660 195 138 39 18
833 You’re looking at 30 years and losing one star 1.3846 0.04545 195 136 43 16
834 Yes, we have one in the oven. 1.3846 0.04487 195 135 45 15
835 Your lawyer thinks that your goose is cooked. 1.3846 0.04660 195 138 39 18
836 I guess this explains why your flour shipments always came in at 2AM. 1.3846 0.04487 195 135 45 15
837 Cheer up. I noticed 5 star Yelp reviews for the prison cafeteria since you've been here. 1.3846 0.04487 195 135 45 15
838 Got it... flour, eggs, saw, 350 degrees, one hour 1.3846 0.04367 195 133 49 13
839 I have the file, of course--but I figured that you would handle the cake. 1.3846 0.04772 195 140 35 20
840 I have reservations. 1.3846 0.04545 195 136 43 16
841 You just had to reveal all eleven of the secret herbs and spices, didn't you Jonathan? I told you there would be repercussions, but would you listen to your wife? Nooooo. 1.3846 0.04427 195 134 47 14
842 Did you have to tell the cops your Bouillabaise was "to die for"? 1.3846 0.04827 195 141 33 21
843 The chickens have gotten a lawyer. 1.3846 0.04487 195 135 45 15
844 Never mind that it was from a mix! Did you get the hacksaw? 1.3846 0.04545 195 136 43 16
845 So you’re saying the cake won’t be finished before the wedding 1.3846 0.04545 195 136 43 16
846 "They have a critic on the inside". 1.3846 0.04660 195 138 39 18
847 Our marriage is down to one star. 1.3846 0.04603 195 137 41 17
848 I begged you to leave the White House last year! 1.3846 0.04936 195 143 29 23
849 You cooked your own goose this time. 1.3846 0.04827 195 141 33 21
850 You're gonna fry for this 1.3846 0.04660 195 138 39 18
851 Well, what you did to that roast WAS a crime. 1.3846 0.04660 195 138 39 18
852 Margarine! What were you thinking?! 1.3842 0.04253 190 127 53 10
853 I told you not to serve your Death by Chocolate. 1.3822 0.04609 191 134 41 16
854 I have bad news. It seems like your goose is cooked. 1.3822 0.04488 191 132 45 14
855 I'm sorry honey, but it appears that your goose is cooked 1.3822 0.04899 191 139 31 21
856 The false advertising charge is bogus---it really was a "Dessert To Die For." 1.3822 0.04488 191 132 45 14
857 It's not looking good, honey. They found the rolling pin. 1.3822 0.04235 191 128 53 10
858 Well, it was your idea to cook the books. 1.3822 0.04426 191 131 47 13
859 The prosecutor is recommending 15 to 20 at 425. 1.3822 0.04669 191 135 39 17
860 Visitation at Cook County Jail 1.3822 0.04426 191 131 47 13
861 You had your fingers in too many pies. 1.3822 0.04669 191 135 39 17
862 I've brought the shank you asked for, you said lamb right? 1.3822 0.04549 191 133 43 15
863 So, putting pineapple on pizza really is criminal? 1.3822 0.04549 191 133 43 15
864 Guess that killer recipe of yours caught up with you. 1.3822 0.04549 191 133 43 15
865 I told you your goose was cooked. 1.3822 0.04609 191 134 41 16
866 You kneaded dough that bad? 1.3822 0.04609 191 134 41 16
867 As your attorney I advise you to simply do your thyme. 1.3822 0.04899 191 139 31 21
868 So how much thyme they givin’ you? 1.3822 0.04843 191 138 33 20
869 To be fair, who puts ketchup on a prime rib? 1.3822 0.04364 191 130 49 12
870 Bad news - the butcher and the candlestick maker confessed. 1.3822 0.04609 191 134 41 16
871 Maybe at least they'll let you cook your own last meal. 1.3822 0.04549 191 133 43 15
872 I still maintain that cooking a steak medium-well is not a crime. 1.3810 0.04642 189 133 40 16
873 Well, when the jury got food poisoning, it should have been your first clue. 1.3810 0.04581 189 132 42 15
874 Is it true what they said? That you were beating the eggs and whipping the cream? 1.3810 0.04519 189 131 44 14
875 But, honey, ‘Your food is to die for’ is just a figure of speech. 1.3810 0.04519 189 131 44 14
876 I’m still confused: are you serving time or serving food? 1.3810 0.04263 189 127 52 10
877 Truth be told, your better-than-sex cake is really only better-than-sex-with-you cake. 1.3810 0.04328 189 128 50 11
878 Let's keep the slicing and dicing to vegetables next time. 1.3804 0.04473 184 126 46 12
879 Where'd you put the dough? 1.3802 0.04707 192 137 37 18
880 We're OK...Billy thinks you're spending time on Top Chef. 1.3797 0.04551 187 130 43 14
881 You're scheduled to fry a week from today at midnight. 1.3797 0.04551 187 130 43 14
882 Honey it was not hyperbole. Your lasagna actually killed. 1.3797 0.04614 187 131 41 15
883 Your Tinder bio said you were an Iron Chef, but I didn't realize it meant you were behind bars. 1.3797 0.04737 187 133 37 17
884 I see your still in culinary confinement. 1.3797 0.04551 187 130 43 14
885 Evidently, you weren’t even good at cooking the books. 1.3797 0.04551 187 130 43 14
886 Oh — I thought you said to make a cake with *phyllo* inside. 1.3797 0.04291 187 126 51 10
887 Well Dear, you gave a new meaning to hell’s kitchen. 1.3797 0.04614 187 131 41 15
888 It seems the jury for your appeal is entirely vegan Mr. Boyardee. 1.3797 0.04676 187 132 39 16
889 Don't cry. We'll sous. 1.3797 0.04487 187 129 45 13
890 You served what with fava beans and a nice Chianti? 1.3797 0.04487 187 129 45 13
891 I told you not to refuse that wedding cake to those Republicans 1.3797 0.04676 187 132 39 16
892 You might have gotten away with it if you hadn't julienned the body. 1.3797 0.04551 187 130 43 14
893 Yes, but Martha didn't shoot her assistant for overcooking the flan. 1.3797 0.04614 187 131 41 15
894 Listen, they know it was you who spoiled the broth. 1.3784 0.04710 185 131 38 16
895 Evidently you can't have your cake and eat it too. 1.3784 0.04453 185 127 46 12
896 You've been sentenced to the electric stove 1.3784 0.04772 185 132 36 17
897 I know two critics who will swear your goose is not cooked. 1.3784 0.04320 185 125 50 10
898 So they are letting you cook your last meal? 1.3784 0.04519 185 128 44 13
899 The prosecution intends to contend that the crème brûlée wasn’t to die for 1.3784 0.04647 185 130 40 15
900 For the last time, Philippe, they arrested you for beating the sous chef, not the eggs. 1.3784 0.04320 185 125 50 10
901 Got it. The file is the key ingredient. 1.3784 0.04453 185 127 46 12
902 I said, 'Leave the gun. Take the canolli,' not the other way around. 1.3784 0.04772 185 132 36 17
903 Sorry, honey...they got to me before I could cook the books 1.3784 0.04647 185 130 40 15
904 It’s another one of your half-baked ideas that got you in here. 1.3770 0.04681 183 129 39 15
905 Herbert! Listen to me! That is not what they mean when they say "Beat Bobby Flay." 1.3770 0.04992 183 134 29 20
906 Our lawyer says that you're going to fry. 1.3770 0.04349 183 124 49 10
907 Truffles again? Why don’t you ask me to smuggle files inside a cake, like a normal prisoner would? 1.3770 0.04745 183 130 37 16
908 It's funny that in 2018, these things still have cords. 1.3770 0.04681 183 129 39 15
909 But did you have to cook the books, too? 1.3770 0.04681 183 129 39 15
910 Russian Intelligence wants to know the recipe of your tomato sauce. 1.3770 0.04417 183 125 47 11
911 You got your just desserts. 1.3770 0.04228 191 129 52 10
912 We'll have you out in short order. 1.3770 0.03744 191 122 66 3
913 Still think the “use by date” is just a scam? 1.3764 0.04569 178 123 43 12
914 They told me to tell you your goose is cooked. 1.3763 0.04563 186 130 42 14
915 Red with meat and white with fish is a stricter law than I thought. 1.3757 0.04584 181 126 42 13
916 How long do I need to set the timer for this time? 1.3757 0.04844 181 130 34 17
917 Your lawyer told me that your goose is cooked. 1.3757 0.04516 181 125 44 12
918 I sold Trump Towers, and the kids and I are leaving. How's cooking class? 1.3757 0.04844 181 130 34 17
919 I found your hidden truffles. 1.3757 0.04716 181 128 38 15
920 Well you did cook the books! 1.3757 0.04516 181 125 44 12
921 You took your Death by Chocolate Cake too far. 1.3757 0.04780 181 129 36 16
922 I asked if they would take me instead but they said no substitutions. 1.3757 0.04650 181 127 40 14
923 So, when you phoned to say you were “on the lamb”... 1.3757 0.04163 181 120 54 7
924 You didn't think to clean the frosting off the knife first? 1.3757 0.04780 181 129 36 16
925 Since when is serving white wine with roast beef a crime? 1.3757 0.04516 181 125 44 12
926 Well, it was to die for. 1.3757 0.04716 181 128 38 15
927 No, tort reform won’t help you. 1.3757 0.04308 181 122 50 9
928 I warned you about taking the Death by Chocolate Cake recipe too far. 1.3757 0.04780 181 129 36 16
929 Well-done steak may be a crime against humanity, but lucky for you a presidential pardon is coming your way. 1.3757 0.04650 181 127 40 14
930 File? It looked like you wrote filo. 1.3757 0.04716 181 128 38 15
931 Can't you cook up a better alibi? 1.3757 0.04584 181 126 42 13
932 Don't cry to me--it was your idea to cook the books. 1.3757 0.04584 181 126 42 13
933 You should know a pinch is not tolerated in today’s political climate. 1.3757 0.05031 181 133 28 20
934 If you were going to rob a bank you should have worn something a little less conspicuous. 1.3757 0.04716 181 128 38 15
935 They say the butcher and the candlestick maker flipped. 1.3757 0.04650 181 127 40 14
936 I tried to tell the police it was Colonel Mustard in the kitchen with the knife, but they wouldn't listen! 1.3757 0.04516 181 125 44 12
937 Your lawyer's going with a funny farm-to-table defense. 1.3757 0.04308 181 122 50 9
938 Are you holding up alright? How's the food? 1.3757 0.04308 181 122 50 9
939 The butcher and the candlestick maker want to know where you hid the money. 1.3757 0.04844 181 130 34 17
940 I'm sorry, but I just think $25 for a hamburger is a crime. 1.3757 0.04716 181 128 38 15
941 If you knew I was coming? Really? 1.3757 0.04448 181 124 46 11
942 Things have really changed at Cook County Jail. 1.3757 0.04584 181 126 42 13
943 Don't they have a change of clothes in there for chrissake? 1.3757 0.04584 181 126 42 13
944 “Jeffrey, you do overcook your Wellington. I’ve never felt safe telling you before now. 1.3757 0.04584 181 126 42 13
945 Well it is hard to believe that you heard grilled cheese as kill Louise 1.3757 0.04650 181 127 40 14
946 The prison staff loved the lobster, sauteed asparagus, and cherry tarts! Oh, and your parole was denied. 1.3757 0.04448 181 124 46 11
947 Still no sign of the dish or spoon. Are you sure they just 'ran away'? 1.3757 0.04716 181 128 38 15
948 No lasagna recipe, no conjugal visit. 1.3757 0.04716 181 128 38 15
949 Spoke with the lawyer. You're toast. 1.3757 0.04780 181 129 36 16
950 Watch your back in the exercise yard. The Butcher and the Candlestick Maker already got rub-a-dub-dubbed out. 1.3757 0.04448 181 124 46 11
951 You have to quit saying "...or you're toast" to people. 1.3757 0.04780 181 129 36 16
952 I can see why they might not let you have your knives in there 1.3757 0.04650 181 127 40 14
953 Et voila...your goose is cooked. 1.3757 0.04448 181 124 46 11
954 Your meals are so good they don't want to grant parole. 1.3757 0.04584 181 126 42 13
955 The story running in all of the papers is that you took all of the dough. 1.3757 0.04516 181 125 44 12
956 Don't you 'moi?' me, Pierre! 1.3757 0.04907 181 131 32 18
957 You wouldn’t listen to me when I said revenge is best served cold. 1.3757 0.04650 181 127 40 14
958 I can't afford your bail. The fee is gastronomical! 1.3757 0.04584 181 126 42 13
959 Who, exactly, is going to bake the cake in which I will be hiding the file? 1.3757 0.04780 181 129 36 16
960 You shouldn't have cooked the books. 1.3757 0.05031 181 133 28 20
961 Apparently this is the lowest rating Michelin has ever awarded. 1.3757 0.04780 181 129 36 16
962 Actually, I did only love you for your crepes. 1.3757 0.05031 181 133 28 20
963 Your lawyer called. He said your goose is cooked. 1.3757 0.04780 181 129 36 16
964 You can tell me. Did it really contain gluten? 1.3757 0.04650 181 127 40 14
965 3 to 5 years at 300 degrees? 1.3757 0.04716 181 128 38 15
966 ... and don't you dare call me cupcake 1.3757 0.04716 181 128 38 15
967 White wine with pork? Oh, Jeremy, how could you! 1.3750 0.04596 184 129 41 14
968 I said “cumin”, not “kill him.” 1.3750 0.04908 184 134 31 19
969 Just serve your thyme and come home. 1.3750 0.04786 184 132 35 17
970 The State has rejected your offer of foie gras terrine to dismiss the charge. You're going to have to put more on the table. 1.3750 0.04531 184 128 43 13
971 What do you mean you "cooked the books?!" 1.3750 0.04786 184 132 35 17
972 Your lawyer says sautéeing the books is just as bad. 1.3743 0.04617 179 125 41 13
973 Well, you cooked your own goose this time buddy 1.3743 0.04685 179 126 39 14
974 Be smart, Marcel, take the plea deal. Forty-five minutes at 350 and you're back on the street. 1.3743 0.04617 179 125 41 13
975 Really. Was putting ketchup on his steak such a big deal? 1.3743 0.04408 179 122 47 10
976 Seriously, you were cooking the books? 1.3743 0.04945 179 130 31 18
977 I've started ordering take-out. 1.3743 0.04617 179 125 41 13
978 Listen closely: I "knead" the "dough." 1.3743 0.04751 179 127 37 15
979 If it's any consolation, the critics are calling this the 'hottest spot in town' since you got locked up. 1.3743 0.04751 179 127 37 15
980 There is some good news, The New Yorker finally picked one of your stupid captions. 1.3743 0.04751 179 127 37 15
981 Apparently they didn’t really want you to beat Bobby Flay. 1.3743 0.04479 179 123 45 11
982 The file is easy, but I feel like you're going to judge me on the cake. 1.3743 0.04685 179 126 39 14
983 At least they're letting you cook your last meal. 1.3743 0.04617 179 125 41 13
984 You should've known you'd end up here, David. He was known as the "sue" chef for a reason! 1.3743 0.04337 179 121 49 9
985 I couldn't find a file, so I substituted an emery board. You won't be able to taste the difference. 1.3743 0.04881 179 129 33 17
986 Uh, you said it was a “killer recipe”, I thought you were kidding 1.3743 0.04549 179 124 43 12
987 I've got it, gently fold in the egg whites, then add the file. 1.3743 0.04617 179 125 41 13
988 They're asking where you stashed the dough. 1.3743 0.04617 179 125 41 13
989 I’m sorry Gaston, but your pâte feuilletée was criminal. 1.3743 0.04549 179 124 43 12
990 They're going to fry you on the chair for 10 minutes at 450 degrees. 1.3743 0.04685 179 126 39 14
991 Your attorney says you'll need to come up with a lot more bread before he represents you. 1.3743 0.04685 179 126 39 14
992 They say you cooked the books 1.3743 0.04685 179 126 39 14
993 Presidential power has gone too far. All you did was overcook his hamburger 1.3743 0.04945 179 130 31 18
994 Well Harrold, when he asked for something “Gluten free, dairy free, nut free, vegetarian, and vegan”, a “knuckle sandwich” technically has meat in it. 1.3743 0.04751 179 127 37 15
995 It does seem a little unfair they rounded your sentence up to 13 from 12. 1.3743 0.04617 179 125 41 13
996 Honestly, I think you took her order for ‘Death by Chocolate’ far too seriously. 1.3743 0.04685 179 126 39 14
997 No, the butcher got away, but the candlestick maker is on death row. 1.3743 0.04881 179 129 33 17
998 On the bright side, the cafeteria's Yelp rating has never been higher. 1.3736 0.04428 182 125 46 11
999 Well, the food out here isn’t great either. 1.3736 0.04694 182 129 38 15
1000 I should've listened when you said your desserts were to die for. 1.3722 0.04528 180 125 43 12
1001 You should have known it was a Ponzi cream. 1.3714 0.04686 175 123 39 13
1002 Your lawyer says you’re toast. 1.3708 0.04561 178 124 42 12
1003 Did you really knead the dough that badly? 1.3708 0.04630 178 125 40 13
1004 He was drinking Riesling with your Boudin Noir Aux Pommes? I guess I would have killed him, too. 1.3708 0.04831 178 128 34 16
1005 Your free-range days are over: they found the stollen dough. 1.3708 0.04698 178 126 38 14
1006 Well, your restaurant always advertised 'food to die for' and a jury agreed with you. 1.3708 0.04698 178 126 38 14
1007 So, somewhere the Murder Mystery Dinner took a wrong turn. 1.3708 0.04630 178 125 40 13
1008 She had a peanut allergy, Stan. You knew that. 1.3708 0.04698 178 126 38 14
1009 And I bought you new whites for your parole hearing. 1.3708 0.04419 178 122 46 10
1010 The butcher and the candlestick maker said to say hi. 1.3708 0.04831 178 128 34 16
1011 Maybe revenge is a dish best served room temperature. 1.3708 0.04630 178 125 40 13
1012 Ya, they will let you out if you stop it with the Kale. 1.3708 0.04698 178 126 38 14
1013 You must understand, Death by Chocolate is a dessert, it's not meant to be taken literally. 1.3708 0.04561 178 124 42 12
1014 My mother was right - you couldn't even cook the books properly. 1.3708 0.04765 178 127 36 15
1015 I'm guessing that Take Out is no longer on the menu. 1.3708 0.04490 178 123 44 11
1016 Be nice. They let you keep the hat. 1.3708 0.04490 178 123 44 11
1017 'Of course the kids miss you, especially your meat loaf.' 1.3708 0.04347 178 121 48 9
1018 What the hell kind of gang did you join in there? 1.3708 0.04961 178 130 30 18
1019 I said your pastry was 'to die for' not 'to kill for.' 1.3708 0.04561 178 124 42 12
1020 I had no idea lousy Yelp reviews could be this serious. 1.3708 0.04698 178 126 38 14
1021 I've almost raised the dough you need. 1.3708 0.04831 178 128 34 16
1022 I told you that was recipe for disaster. 1.3708 0.04490 178 123 44 11
1023 The bank took the Restaurant, the house and the car. Michelin took the stars. 1.3708 0.04490 178 123 44 11
1024 Remember the four and twenty blackbirds you baked in a pie? Well, now they’re singing! 1.3708 0.04698 178 126 38 14
1025 Now, I'm not going to sugarcoat this... 1.3708 0.04490 178 123 44 11
1026 It's as we feared. Your goose is cooked. 1.3708 0.04765 178 127 36 15
1027 I warned you not to hire Martha Stewart’s lawyer 1.3708 0.04630 178 125 40 13
1028 You're looking at four and twenty counts of animal cruelty. 1.3708 0.04831 178 128 34 16
1029 Let's hope like your cuisine, the execution is flawless. 1.3708 0.04630 178 125 40 13
1030 You can't just SAY they're free-range and heirloom... 1.3708 0.04831 178 128 34 16
1031 I just can't go through another one of your half-baked schemes. 1.3708 0.04419 178 122 46 10
1032 The warden says consommé visits depend on time served. 1.3708 0.04698 178 126 38 14
1033 Honey, I told you not to mess with the vegans. 1.3708 0.04698 178 126 38 14
1034 Yes, this order is to go. 1.3708 0.04561 178 124 42 12
1035 Why did you have to cook the books? 1.3708 0.04630 178 125 40 13
1036 So tell me again...I put the water in a pot, put the pot on the stove...then what? 1.3708 0.04561 178 124 42 12
1037 They said you were charged with resisting a roast. 1.3708 0.04698 178 126 38 14
1038 I want to bail you out, but I ran out of dough. 1.3708 0.04630 178 125 40 13
1039 They're receptive to your idea for a cooking show, but they don't care for 'Bake No Prisoners' as a title. 1.3699 0.04649 173 121 40 12
1040 You beat the eggs and whipped the cream. What did you expect? 1.3699 0.04577 173 120 42 11
1041 None of us thought you literally meant it was "to die for." 1.3693 0.04934 176 128 31 17
1042 You need me to raise HOW much dough?!? 1.3678 0.04906 174 126 32 16
1043 You shouldn't have made mincemeat of him. 1.3678 0.04407 174 119 46 9
1044 But darling, I don't know how to raise the dough. 1.3678 0.04699 174 123 38 13
1045 You were supposed to write a cookbook, not cook the books. 1.3678 0.04838 174 125 34 15
1046 They claim you killed Colonel Mustard in the Kitchen with the Candlestick. 1.3678 0.04906 174 126 32 16
1047 Don't worry, this farm-to-table-to prison concept is destined to be a fad. 1.3678 0.04555 174 121 42 11
1048 Didn’t you know “To die for” is just an expression? 1.3678 0.04555 174 121 42 11
1049 Is it true? Did you beat those eggs? 1.3678 0.04555 174 121 42 11
1050 That's not what I meant when I said, "Cook the books!" 1.3678 0.04838 174 125 34 15
1051 I told you not to work for Donald Trump. 1.3678 0.04838 174 125 34 15
1052 At least the other guests said the execution was perfect. 1.3678 0.04838 174 125 34 15
1053 The lab confirmed that your wild petrale sole is indeed farmed tilapia. 1.3678 0.04555 174 121 42 11
1054 It was the kale. 1.3678 0.04628 174 122 40 12
1055 Yes, the twinkie defense was a real thing. An eclair is something completely different. 1.3678 0.04906 174 126 32 16
1056 It's in my purse. But I just assumed you would bake the cake. 1.3678 0.04482 174 120 44 10
1057 I’d like to help you out, Philippe, but I can’t seem to raise the dough. 1.3678 0.04769 174 124 36 14
1058 Let's put it this way: Apparently most diners are allergic to arsenic. 1.3678 0.04699 174 123 38 13
1059 No, dear. You are in the Department of Corrections, not Confections. 1.3678 0.04906 174 126 32 16
1060 What did you think would happen - calling it your "killer recipe" at the White House!? 1.3672 0.04711 177 126 37 14
1061 This is what happens when you try to carry your bombe onto a plane. 1.3669 0.04491 169 116 44 9
1062 I told you not to use kale. 1.3663 0.04806 172 123 35 14
1063 The judge said your sentence is 3-5 years, or until golden brown and fragrant. 1.3663 0.04588 172 120 41 11
1064 They've searched the house and confiscated the dough. 1.3663 0.04662 172 121 39 12
1065 When my husband said he would die for your recipe, you may have taken him too literally. 1.3663 0.04876 172 124 33 15
1066 The police say it was a crime of gastronomic proportion. 1.3663 0.04806 172 123 35 14
1067 So now you're a pastry chef. When's it gonna end, Louie, when's it gonna end? 1.3663 0.04514 172 119 43 10
1068 so after I checked the oven, I then realized your lawyer was only speaking figuratively about your goose. 1.3663 0.04734 172 122 37 13
1069 I told you it was a crime to serve red wine with fish. 1.3663 0.04734 172 122 37 13
1070 On the other hand, this prison cafeteria's online star rating has gone up since people heard you were convicted... 1.3663 0.04438 172 118 45 9
1071 My mother thinks you intended that dish for me instead of my sister. 1.3663 0.04876 172 124 33 15
1072 Legally, you can't have your cake and eat it, too. 1.3663 0.04662 172 121 39 12
1073 I said “le poisson”- not “with poison”! 1.3663 0.04438 172 118 45 9
1074 When I suggested making our own bread, I didn’t mean counterfeiting. 1.3663 0.04662 172 121 39 12
1075 They found your knife in the kitchen, you idiot, but they still think it was Colonel Mustard in the conservatory. 1.3663 0.04806 172 123 35 14
1076 Stick a fork in it, Fred. 1.3663 0.04588 172 120 41 11
1077 Yes, it was a mistake to brag about your bombes at the airport. 1.3663 0.04806 172 123 35 14
1078 And what exactly does Top Chef mean in there? 1.3663 0.04588 172 120 41 11
1079 So when you told them you cooked the books, they assigned you to kitchen duty? 1.3663 0.04876 172 124 33 15
1080 You must have known that beating, whipping, and carving your way through life would have dire consequences." 1.3663 0.04806 172 123 35 14
1081 Is your goose cooked yet? 1.3663 0.04734 172 122 37 13
1082 The police think your alibi is half-baked 1.3663 0.04588 172 120 41 11
1083 The Butcher and the Candlestick Maker send their regards. 1.3663 0.05081 172 127 27 18
1084 The cops found the dough. 1.3663 0.04876 172 124 33 15
1085 You're never getting out. The warden's a gourmet. 1.3663 0.04662 172 121 39 12
1086 I told you that head chef at Mar-a-Lago would lead to trouble. 1.3663 0.05213 172 129 23 20
1087 They say you cooked the books 1.3663 0.04806 172 123 35 14
1088 Honestly, Armand, I warned you that you would end up here if you kept on with those half baked schemes. 1.3663 0.04662 172 121 39 12
1089 Wow! You were right when you claimed that your creme brulee was killer! 1.3663 0.04734 172 122 37 13
1090 Come on Jacque, where’s the dough? 1.3663 0.04876 172 124 33 15
1091 I'm sorry, but cooking the books does not make you a chef. 1.3663 0.04945 172 125 31 16
1092 They're offering 13 years. But for you, they'll make it a dozen. 1.3663 0.04734 172 122 37 13
1093 I've decided on my book title: "They Booked the Cook Who Cooked the Books." 1.3663 0.04806 172 123 35 14
1094 I'm still cooking everything just the way you did. Except the books, of course. 1.3663 0.04876 172 124 33 15
1095 Margarine ... really? 1.3663 0.04588 172 120 41 11
1096 They’re saying it was death by chocolate. 1.3663 0.04588 172 120 41 11
1097 I told you your goose was cooked. 1.3663 0.04662 172 121 39 12
1098 Actually, what I said was that you would be less conspicuous if you dressed like a higher-class crook. 1.3647 0.04771 170 121 36 13
1099 I hid the dough in a safe place. It'll be waiting for you when you get out. 1.3647 0.04697 170 120 38 12
1100 The butcher took a plea but the candlestick maker plans to take his chances in court. 1.3647 0.04697 170 120 38 12
1101 Didn't I tell you this was a recipe for disaster? 1.3647 0.04771 170 121 36 13
1102 But you never cooked when you lived at home? 1.3647 0.04547 170 118 42 10
1103 Is white the new orange? 1.3647 0.04914 170 123 32 15
1104 ‘Stop asking for your knives, it’s not going to happen’ 1.3647 0.04622 170 119 40 11
1105 Make that to go please 1.3647 0.04697 170 120 38 12
1106 Keep in mind that you cooked your own goose. 1.3647 0.04469 170 117 44 9
1107 They tell me they still want to know where the dough is. 1.3647 0.04914 170 123 32 15
1108 When your dating profile said you were a Killer Chef, I did not think you meant literally! 1.3647 0.04469 170 117 44 9
1109 So it wasn’t gluten free. Is that such a crime? 1.3647 0.04771 170 121 36 13
1110 The blueberry/lemon recipe - Did you ever write it down? 1.3647 0.04914 170 123 32 15
1111 They say you pinched the salt. 1.3647 0.04697 170 120 38 12
1112 The butcher and the candlestick maker are going to testify it was your idea to take the tub out to sea. 1.3647 0.04771 170 121 36 13
1113 Where did you leave the recipe for the cake with a file in it? 1.3647 0.04391 170 116 46 8
1114 I don't blame you. I would've done the same thing to that Yelp reviewer. 1.3647 0.04622 170 119 40 11
1115 We're trying to get you Martha Stewart's old place. 1.3647 0.04985 170 124 30 16
1116 Your lawyer says it's all in the presentation. 1.3647 0.04469 170 117 44 9
1117 As you requested, I've hidden the file in a Grand Soufflé made with a base of bouille that was baked at 400 degrees and is served with a drizzle of Marnier Sauce. 1.3647 0.05054 170 125 28 17
1118 I told you, no one likes kale anymore. 1.3647 0.04843 170 122 34 14
1119 You're sticking with it was Colonel Mustard, in the kitchen, with the butter? 1.3647 0.04914 170 123 32 15
1120 I know I should provide an alibi but I'd really like your secret sauce recipe first. 1.3631 0.05096 168 124 27 17
1121 As your counsel, I swear I will not rest until you get your just desserts. 1.3631 0.04808 168 120 35 13
1122 There were too many of you in the kitchen. 1.3631 0.04881 168 121 33 14
1123 So now you discover your love of cooking? 1.3631 0.04808 168 120 35 13
1124 Did you explain that there's another CIA? 1.3631 0.04808 168 120 35 13
1125 You invented avocado toast. A full confession is your only hope. 1.3631 0.04808 168 120 35 13
1126 Cannabis cannolis--no wonder! 1.3631 0.04808 168 120 35 13
1127 The good news is, your soufflé was to die for. 1.3631 0.04881 168 121 33 14
1128 If you do the crime, you do the thyme. 1.3631 0.04808 168 120 35 13
1129 When you said your souffle was to die for, I didn't think you were serious. 1.3631 0.04733 168 119 37 12
1130 Dear, nobody cares that Sweeney Todd did it first. 1.3631 0.05165 168 125 25 18
1131 We're down to a one star rating. They say it tastes like prison food. 1.3631 0.04808 168 120 35 13
1132 Not much happening on the outside except your Michelin rating was reduced to a flat tire 1.3631 0.05025 168 123 29 16
1133 Does this mean you won't be home in time to fix dinner? 1.3631 0.04808 168 120 35 13
1134 They still haven’t caught the Gingerbread Man. 1.3631 0.04881 168 121 33 14
1135 Yes, yes. I took the gun and left the cannoli. 1.3631 0.04881 168 121 33 14
1136 The candlestick maker was given immunity in return for his testimony against you. 1.3631 0.04501 168 116 43 9
1137 Harry, you are facing 1 year for each of the 4 and 20 blackbirds you backed into that pie. 1.3626 0.04819 171 123 34 14
1138 You murdered that steak - don't deny it. 1.3614 0.04693 166 117 38 11
1139 They’re charging you with a haute crime. 1.3614 0.04770 166 118 36 12
1140 Remind me, how much thyme have you served? 1.3614 0.04920 166 120 32 14
1141 The saw won't fit into the cake. 1.3614 0.04994 166 121 30 15
1142 Vladimir is trying to get you a pardon and a job in the kitchen at Mar A Lago. 1.3614 0.04920 166 120 32 14
1143 So, I guess meat is murder. 1.3614 0.05138 166 123 26 17
1144 The Candlestick maker will be my witness. He'll swear it too: I'm not the Butcher! 1.3614 0.04920 166 120 32 14
1145 You never should have advertised your pizza place as the best place in town to find “Food To Die For” 1.3614 0.04846 166 119 34 13
1146 So none of it was gluten-free? None of it? 1.3614 0.04534 166 115 42 9
1147 Seriously? That’s what you thought “Beating Bobby Flay” meant? 1.3614 0.05067 166 122 28 16
1148 Resisting a roast is a serious offense. 1.3614 0.04920 166 120 32 14
1149 I need the cake recipe 1.3614 0.04693 166 117 38 11
1150 I have told you time and time again. You cannot make Chorizo out of just anyone 1.3614 0.04770 166 118 36 12
1151 ... I don't care about your palate. The key is coming in a plain pound cake and that's that. 1.3614 0.04534 166 115 42 9
1152 Of course they traced it back to you. Yours was the only one-star review he ever wrote. 1.3614 0.04693 166 117 38 11
1153 I heard you're going to fry. 1.3614 0.04920 166 120 32 14
1154 I told you the food was to die for. 1.3614 0.04614 166 116 40 10
1155 Before I forget, when should I take the roast out of the oven? 1.3614 0.04534 166 115 42 9
1156 I thought “killer recipe” was just an expression. 1.3614 0.04994 166 121 30 15
1157 I said "no salt", not "assault" 1.3614 0.04994 166 121 30 15
1158 They're telling me your goose is cooked. 1.3614 0.04770 166 118 36 12
1159 For the hundredth time, you should have got your hearing checked. She didn't ask for her ex, beaten. 1.3614 0.04846 166 119 34 13
1160 Well at least it's a 4 star prison. 1.3614 0.04453 166 114 44 8
1161 I'd like to speak with the manager. 1.3614 0.04846 166 119 34 13
1162 The judge said he wanted to see you fry. 1.3614 0.04846 166 119 34 13
1163 That's what you get for stealing mother's recipes. 1.3614 0.04693 166 117 38 11
1164 "I'm sorry, but it IS a crime to add milk to an omelette". 1.3614 0.04693 166 117 38 11
1165 I don't have enough dough. 1.3614 0.04994 166 121 30 15
1166 Your goose is cooked. It was delicious. 1.3614 0.05067 166 122 28 16
1167 He said he'll delete his negative Yelp review of your Duck a l'Orange just as soon as you tell the police where you're hiding his parents. 1.3614 0.04846 166 119 34 13
1168 I didn't know that cooking the books was a crime. 1.3614 0.04770 166 118 36 12
1169 They're saying you're gonna fry. 1.3614 0.04920 166 120 32 14
1170 The lawyer says he wants more dough. 1.3614 0.04846 166 119 34 13
1171 I was hoping for a confectional visit. 1.3614 0.04770 166 118 36 12
1172 They're not so keen on getting you out but they really want your recipe for duck l'orange. 1.3614 0.04920 166 120 32 14
1173 I'm sorry I put the jar of cannabis next to the thyme. 1.3614 0.04534 166 115 42 9
1174 Apparently, filleting a food critic is not considered a public service by everyone. 1.3614 0.04920 166 120 32 14
1175 It doesn’t look good….all evidence points to Death by Chocolate 1.3609 0.04710 169 120 37 12
1176 You should have left the gun and taken the cannoli. 1.3598 0.04729 164 116 37 11
1177 Looks like your goose is cooked. 1.3598 0.04884 164 118 33 13
1178 I told you not to try to take that bombe on the plane. 1.3598 0.04649 164 115 39 10
1179 I have good news and bad news. The bad: your parole was denied. The good: Michelin just awarded the commissary four stars. 1.3598 0.05182 164 122 25 17
1180 I told you cooking for Donald Trump wasn't worth the risk. 1.3598 0.04884 164 118 33 13
1181 Frankly, ignorance of the “Employees must wash hands” sign is no excuse. 1.3598 0.04649 164 115 39 10
1182 I told you white wine with beef was criminal. 1.3598 0.04485 164 113 43 8
1183 I hate to tell you this, but the new chef is better. 1.3598 0.04729 164 116 37 11
1184 I told you arsenic wasn't a spice. 1.3598 0.05035 164 120 29 15
1185 Bad news. They found the recipe. 1.3598 0.04807 164 117 35 12
1186 I'm prego. 1.3598 0.04884 164 118 33 13
1187 The fingerprints on the knife match the ones on the ladle, spoon, and spatula. 1.3598 0.04485 164 113 43 8
1188 I spoke with the bondsman. We're going to knead more dough. 1.3598 0.04884 164 118 33 13
1189 So, you'll be done in 30 but I have to turn you over after 15? 1.3598 0.04649 164 115 39 10
1190 The Governor said no. Looks like you're going to fry. 1.3598 0.04568 164 114 41 9
1191 They're saying that calling it "Death by Chocolate" counts as a confession. 1.3598 0.04960 164 119 31 14
1192 Listen carefully, the proof is in the pudding. 1.3598 0.04884 164 118 33 13
1193 They said you're going to fry 1.3598 0.04960 164 119 31 14
1194 The lawyer said that your goose is cooked. 1.3598 0.05182 164 122 25 17
1195 You shouldn't have cooked the books. 1.3598 0.04729 164 116 37 11
1196 Their lawyer says you’re gonna fry. 1.3598 0.04884 164 118 33 13
1197 They didn’t want you to literally beat Bobby Flay. 1.3580 0.05001 162 118 30 14
1198 To put this in terms you'll understand, for this crime you could be in jail for 6 months to a year, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. 1.3580 0.04602 162 113 40 9
1199 I’m really sorry, but they said you’re not allowed to cook your own last meal. 1.3580 0.04684 162 114 38 10
1200 “I thought murder by chocolate was just an expression”. 1.3580 0.04845 162 116 34 12
1201 I'm putting ketchup on it, and you can't stop me. 1.3580 0.04684 162 114 38 10
1202 What do you mean, you were cooking the books? 1.3580 0.05077 162 119 28 15
1203 I'm afraid we both knew what would come of your half-baked ideas. 1.3580 0.04432 162 111 44 7
1204 After being grilled for an hour, I confessed. 1.3580 0.04845 162 116 34 12
1205 Well, you knew it was a secret recipe. 1.3580 0.05077 162 119 28 15
1206 Budget cuts--you have to make your final meal yourself. 1.3580 0.05001 162 118 30 14
1207 Did you use the wrong kind of poisson? 1.3580 0.04924 162 117 32 13
1208 You stabbed him because he asked for ketchup? 1.3580 0.04766 162 115 36 11
1209 How much do you knead? 1.3580 0.04684 162 114 38 10
1210 Do I add the file before or after baking? 1.3580 0.04766 162 115 36 11
1211 I don't have enough dough to bail you out. 1.3580 0.04924 162 117 32 13
1212 What did you expect? You got your just desserts. 1.3580 0.04845 162 116 34 12
1213 Bad news: the jury is all lobsters. 1.3580 0.05226 162 121 24 17
1214 I couldn’t help myself, I kneaded the dough. 1.3580 0.05001 162 118 30 14
1215 What do you think about free-range chickens now? 1.3580 0.04684 162 114 38 10
1216 To be fair, it was a crime to pair the Bordeaux with the mussels. 1.3580 0.05001 162 118 30 14
1217 Wouldn't putting it in a cake be obvious? 1.3580 0.04684 162 114 38 10
1218 I promise I'll wait for you, but please just tell me where you put the dough. 1.3580 0.05152 162 120 26 16
1219 They got me for cooking the books. 1.3580 0.04924 162 117 32 13
1220 Unfortunately, Zagat has a policy against reviewing prisons. 1.3580 0.04766 162 115 36 11
1221 Did you really think they'd allow you to get away with putting pineapple on pizza?? 1.3580 0.05001 162 118 30 14
1222 You left the oven on. 1.3580 0.04924 162 117 32 13
1223 Really? Bake a cake and put a file in it? That's your big idea? 1.3580 0.04845 162 116 34 12
1224 I told you that cooking the books was a half-baked idea. 1.3580 0.04345 162 110 46 6
1225 After that meal you’re lucky you’re not on death row. 1.3580 0.05152 162 120 26 16
1226 No one can dispute that it was a meal to die for. 1.3580 0.05077 162 119 28 15
1227 A wise sage knew you’d end up serving thyme! 1.3580 0.04924 162 117 32 13
1228 Don’t worry. I have it on a slow simmer. 1.3580 0.04766 162 115 36 11
1229 Well what did you expect when you substituted butter for olive oil in that vegan dish? 1.3580 0.04766 162 115 36 11
1230 When I asked you to fry the chicken, I was NOT referring to my husband! 1.3580 0.05152 162 120 26 16
1231 He didn't mean the meal was literally to die for. 1.3580 0.05152 162 120 26 16
1232 You went one toque over the line, sweet Jesús. 1.3580 0.04924 162 117 32 13
1233 How many times did I tell you to stop cooking the books. 1.3580 0.05001 162 118 30 14
1234 I’ll see if I can get you some cage free eggs! 1.3580 0.04602 162 113 40 9
1235 I’m sure the whole “death by chocolate” thing will be cleared up. 1.3580 0.04602 162 113 40 9
1236 Are you cooking up an escape plan again? 1.3580 0.05001 162 118 30 14
1237 I’m asking again: Where’d you stash the dough? 1.3580 0.04845 162 116 34 12
1238 Evidently the jury concluded that your Waffle Crab Surprise was a form of assault. 1.3580 0.04924 162 117 32 13
1239 And Michelin took away another star. 1.3580 0.04924 162 117 32 13
1240 Looks like your goose is cooked. 1.3580 0.04845 162 116 34 12
1241 He said your goose was ready, or done, or something like that. 1.3580 0.04766 162 115 36 11
1242 For the last time, punching a customer in the face is an 'assault' not an 'amuse-bouche'. 1.3580 0.04766 162 115 36 11
1243 I bake you a cake with a file in it and all you can say is my icing is too sweet? 1.3580 0.04845 162 116 34 12
1244 Are you serving thyme? 1.3576 0.04860 165 119 33 13
1245 Well, you knew serving red wine with fish is a crime. 1.3576 0.04705 165 117 37 11
1246 It looks bad for you, official verdict was death by chocolate... 1.3576 0.04705 165 117 37 11
1247 Dammit Jeff, why'd you have to put the proof in the pudding? 1.3562 0.05043 160 117 29 14
1248 The jury has requested an amuse-bouche. 1.3562 0.04964 160 116 31 13
1249 No, all mushrooms are not the same. 1.3562 0.04637 160 112 39 9
1250 You've inspired me to write a book: LambShank Redemption. 1.3562 0.04721 160 113 37 10
1251 I told you not to change the menu, the President likes his fast food. 1.3562 0.04964 160 116 31 13
1252 I know lots of chefs use bouillon cubes Howard, but you got caught. 1.3562 0.04803 160 114 35 11
1253 The D.A. offered 12 years, but you'll have to serve 13. 1.3562 0.05120 160 118 27 15
1254 How's the food in there? 1.3562 0.04884 160 115 33 12
1255 What did I tell yo about cooking the books? 1.3562 0.05120 160 118 27 15
1256 I KNOW you prefer gas over electric, but I don't think that's an option for the chair... 1.3562 0.05043 160 117 29 14
1257 You did warn them that it was killer chili. 1.3562 0.04721 160 113 37 10
1258 I did try to tell you that it was a bad idea to cook the books. 1.3562 0.04964 160 116 31 13
1259 The airport is never the right place to share a bombe recipe 1.3562 0.04551 160 111 41 8
1260 I told you not to try a french recipe. The word was POISSON, stupid!!! 1.3562 0.04884 160 115 33 12
1261 They're saying nine of the jurors are Yelpers... 1.3562 0.04551 160 111 41 8
1262 It's okay, you're only in custardy. 1.3562 0.05120 160 118 27 15
1263 The heat is on, they know you cooked the books and stole the dough. 1.3562 0.04884 160 115 33 12
1264 One last time, where did you hide the dough? 1.3562 0.04964 160 116 31 13
1265 There's simply no accounting for taste. 1.3562 0.04375 160 109 45 6
1266 I'm sure your meatloaf didn't start the riot. 1.3562 0.04884 160 115 33 12
1267 Cook anyway you want; you have a captive audience here! 1.3562 0.04721 160 113 37 10
1268 I'm afraid they found traces of msg on the wok. 1.3562 0.04803 160 114 35 11
1269 I told you to study up on tort law. 1.3562 0.04884 160 115 33 12
1270 You couldn’t resist adding a dash of gluten, could you? 1.3562 0.04721 160 113 37 10
1271 And then I fold the file in, but making sure not to disturb the egg whites. 1.3562 0.04637 160 112 39 9
1272 Stop complaining. This joint got five stars in "The Complete Guide to Prison Dining." 1.3562 0.04803 160 114 35 11
1273 They say you’re facing six to a baker’s dozen. 1.3562 0.05043 160 117 29 14
1274 What are you serving? 1.3562 0.04964 160 116 31 13
1275 Your lawyer says you're looking at 20 to 25 years at 350 degrees. 1.3562 0.04884 160 115 33 12
1276 My compliments. 1.3558 0.04821 163 117 34 12
1277 I can get you the dough tomorrow. 1.3558 0.04975 163 119 30 14
1278 I know he giggled, but you can't go around poking boys in the belly anymore. 1.3558 0.04821 163 117 34 12
1279 I should tell you, I've started seeing the Muffin Man. 1.3558 0.04821 163 117 34 12
1280 I told you Decorated Petit Fours called Trump's Penis was not a good idea 1.3558 0.04975 163 119 30 14
1281 I told you it wasn't a good idea to cook the books. 1.3544 0.05085 158 116 28 14
1282 I can't wait; I'm dating the muffin man. 1.3544 0.04758 158 112 36 10
1283 The lawyer says asking for ketchup doesn't justify murder. 1.3544 0.05006 158 115 30 13
1284 "Yes, I brought a file. But I don't know how to bake a cake". 1.3544 0.04672 158 111 38 9
1285 Looks like you're the scapegoat for the new torte reforms. 1.3544 0.04924 158 114 32 12
1286 It's just not the same from the can. 1.3544 0.04585 158 110 40 8
1287 I told you he'd send you to Guantanamo if you didn't cook the steak well-done and put ketchup on top. 1.3544 0.05242 158 118 24 16
1288 My tastes have changed. 1.3544 0.05085 158 116 28 14
1289 No, I can't bring you your knives. 1.3544 0.04496 158 109 42 7
1290 You probably should have just baked that cake for Adam and Steve. 1.3544 0.04842 158 113 34 11
1291 So, you did use margarine. I knew it! 1.3540 0.04697 161 114 37 10
1292 Why couldn't you just hand over the dough? 1.3540 0.04528 161 112 41 8
1293 You weren't supposed to cook the books. 1.3540 0.05093 161 119 27 15
1294 When you said "killer recipe," I thought you meant something else. 1.3537 0.04717 164 117 36 11
1295 They found pictures of you in the tub with the Butcher and the Candlestick Maker on your hard drive. 1.3529 0.04680 153 107 38 8
1296 The police misunderstood me when I said that you kneaded the dough and it was stollen. 1.3526 0.04881 156 112 33 11
1297 Then, after the grilling, the judge clarified ordering a reduction would be fruitless. 1.3526 0.04965 156 113 31 12
1298 Think positive! It’s only 20 years and it’s not like you’ve lost a star. 1.3526 0.04530 156 108 41 7
1299 They’re saying you beat the eggs. 1.3526 0.04881 156 112 33 11
1300 File? Not filé ? 1.3526 0.04965 156 113 31 12
1301 I've brought the shank you wanted, you said lamb right? 1.3526 0.04796 156 111 35 10
1302 Have you spoken to your lawyer? I am concerned that your goose is cooked. 1.3526 0.04530 156 108 41 7
1303 I'm innocent! The proof is in the pudding. 1.3526 0.04965 156 113 31 12
1304 I’ve been eating out every night. 1.3526 0.04881 156 112 33 11
1305 I told you your plan was half baked. 1.3526 0.04437 156 107 43 6
1306 Your appeal collapsed faster than your souffles. 1.3526 0.04709 156 110 37 9
1307 Is this about your killer chocolate cake? 1.3526 0.04709 156 110 37 9
1308 I warned you not to put your Spotted Dick on the dessert tray 1.3526 0.05129 156 115 27 14
1309 The judge didn't find your "No soup for you" comment very funny, it seems. 1.3526 0.04796 156 111 35 10
1310 Good news! It was just taken off the endangered species list! 1.3526 0.04620 156 109 39 8
1311 I told you not not to cook the books. 1.3526 0.04965 156 113 31 12
1312 Please listen carefully as our menu items have recently changed. 1.3526 0.04965 156 113 31 12
1313 It's okay, they're only holding you in custardy. 1.3526 0.04881 156 112 33 11
1314 Can we not talk about frying? 1.3526 0.05129 156 115 27 14
1315 It wasn't me. It was DiGiorno 1.3522 0.04816 159 114 34 11
1316 No, that's not what I meant when I said "killer meatloaf." 1.3510 0.04526 151 104 41 6
1317 That half-star review was unfair, Andre. But don't you think you overreacted? 1.3506 0.05007 154 112 30 12
1318 I always knew you'd serve thyme. 1.3506 0.04921 154 111 32 11
1319 It doesn't matter. Four and twenty or 24, its a lot of black birds and the Health Dept. won't allow it. 1.3506 0.04655 154 108 38 8
1320 Just because he was a food critic, doesn't mean he was asking for it. 1.3506 0.05091 154 113 28 13
1321 It was a crime what you did to those steaks. 1.3506 0.05091 154 113 28 13
1322 They suspected from the start that it was you who cooked the books. 1.3506 0.04563 154 107 40 7
1323 Now you know how your "freshly caught" lobsters feel. 1.3506 0.05091 154 113 28 13
1324 Are the butcher and candlestick maker also in custody? 1.3506 0.04834 154 110 34 10
1325 They say they're going to see that you fry. 1.3506 0.04834 154 110 34 10
1326 I don't care if you prefer limousin clafoutis, the file is going in a plain pound cake with vanilla icing and that's that! 1.3506 0.04834 154 110 34 10
1327 I told you this would happen if you continued cooking the books. 1.3506 0.05255 154 115 24 15
1328 When you said you'd kill for a decent bearnaise sauce I didn't think you meant it literally. 1.3506 0.04655 154 108 38 8
1329 You are looking at 30 days for beating the eggs, and another 30 days for whipping the cream. I just hope they don't find out you are also cooking the books. 1.3506 0.04921 154 111 32 11
1330 When are you getting out, I have a dinner party Saturday night. 1.3506 0.04746 154 109 36 9
1331 You're toast. 1.3506 0.04746 154 109 36 9
1332 So you were caught cooking the books. 1.3506 0.04746 154 109 36 9
1333 I don't blame them---guacamole on white bread? 1.3506 0.05007 154 112 30 12
1334 So what's a good substitution for the death cap mushroom? 1.3506 0.04921 154 111 32 11
1335 I tried to tell you, people think Death By Chocolate is hyperbole 1.3506 0.04921 154 111 32 11
1336 I knew you couldn't handle the heat. 1.3506 0.04563 154 107 40 7
1337 The Judge said he was considering 7 to 10 years at 350F. 1.3506 0.04834 154 110 34 10
1338 Chef Boy R. Dershowitz has agreed to defend you. 1.3506 0.05091 154 113 28 13
1339 Are you rooming with a cereal killer? 1.3506 0.05091 154 113 28 13
1340 Were you one toque over the line again? 1.3506 0.04834 154 110 34 10
1341 I told you to quit squeezing those dough boys 1.3503 0.05259 157 118 23 16
1342 Well, what did you expect, using margarine as a substitute? 1.3503 0.04596 157 110 39 8
1343 So how did they find out you cooked the books? 1.3503 0.04855 157 113 33 11
1344 But seriously, death by chocolate? 1.3503 0.05101 157 116 27 14
1345 And while you're in here, the real Muffin Man is still at large! 1.3503 0.04938 157 114 31 12
1346 The Parole Board stuck a fork in you, and you're not done yet. 1.3487 0.04692 152 107 37 8
1347 It was that food-to-die-for ad that lead them to you 1.3487 0.05219 152 113 25 14
1348 You steal one little recipe from Martha Stewart's play book and this is what happens. 1.3487 0.04874 152 109 33 10
1349 You didn't really think you could get away with substituting margarine for butter, did you? 1.3487 0.04692 152 107 37 8
1350 Of course I want it to go. 1.3487 0.04784 152 108 35 9
1351 I'm moving in with the candlestick maker. 1.3487 0.04784 152 108 35 9
1352 I warned you about that "Death by Chocolate" dessert. I told you it would be considered premeditation one day. 1.3487 0.04692 152 107 37 8
1353 You're the chef - why would I bake a cake? 1.3487 0.04962 152 110 31 11
1354 Just tell them where you get the foie gras from! 1.3487 0.05135 152 112 27 13
1355 On the plus side, the commissary got a Michelin star. 1.3487 0.04874 152 109 33 10
1356 That isn’t what I meant when I said take-out! 1.3487 0.04598 152 106 39 7
1357 Apparently the minimum security block already has a very good sous chef. 1.3487 0.04502 152 105 41 6
1358 Look. If you want me to spatchcock the chicken, you have to tell me where you hid the cleaver. 1.3487 0.04692 152 107 37 8
1359 My buns are the only ones that should matter to you. 1.3487 0.04784 152 108 35 9
1360 Hello, is this the Cook County Jail? 1.3487 0.05135 152 112 27 13
1361 I told you it was a half-baked scheme 1.3487 0.04692 152 107 37 8
1362 They say with good behavior and great croissants I"ll be out in a year. 1.3487 0.04962 152 110 31 11
1363 Did you get the job in the prison kitchen? 1.3487 0.05135 152 112 27 13
1364 Honey, it's not your fault there was gluten in it. 1.3487 0.05302 152 114 23 15
1365 "so...cordon bleu is the new black? 1.3487 0.04874 152 109 33 10
1366 They found the dough. 1.3487 0.05135 152 112 27 13
1367 Was that a 1/4 tsp of Pink Himalayan Salt from the Khewra Salt Mine near Punjab, Pakistan or the Fossil River Gourmet River Flavored Salt Flakes Gently Combined with Rose Petals, Rosemary and Wine? 1.3487 0.05135 152 112 27 13
1368 They're charging you with "death by chocolate." 1.3487 0.04962 152 110 31 11
1369 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Life without parole. Got it. Now, how do I reset the clock on the oven? 1.3487 0.04962 152 110 31 11
1370 Where's the dough? 1.3487 0.04962 152 110 31 11
1371 Your death by chocolate recipe is going viral. 1.3487 0.05049 152 111 29 12
1372 Your first mistake was relying on a cookbook titled ‘To Serve Man’. 1.3487 0.05135 152 112 27 13
1373 I’m sorry about what I said on Yelp. 1.3487 0.04962 152 110 31 11
1374 You got grilled on the stand! 1.3487 0.04692 152 107 37 8
1375 The good news is that the restaurant has turned around. 1.3487 0.04962 152 110 31 11
1376 I guess it's not so bad. They let you keep your hat. 1.3487 0.04502 152 105 41 6
1377 So where did you hide the dough? 1.3487 0.04784 152 108 35 9
1378 It seems the file baked in a cake wasn't an original idea after all. 1.3487 0.04874 152 109 33 10
1379 The lawyer says your goose is cooked.' 1.3487 0.04598 152 106 39 7
1380 The irony is you did use caged eggs. 1.3487 0.04598 152 106 39 7
1381 I told you cooking the books was a bad idea 1.3487 0.04784 152 108 35 9
1382 So now you're Iron Chef. Was it worth it? 1.3487 0.04962 152 110 31 11
1383 I'm sorry I doubted how killer your risotto is. 1.3487 0.04784 152 108 35 9
1384 You're cooked. 1.3487 0.04962 152 110 31 11
1385 I’m sorry, but I can’t simmer for 20 years. 1.3487 0.04692 152 107 37 8
1386 I told you to follow the recipe. 1.3487 0.04784 152 108 35 9
1387 The battering has to stop. 1.3487 0.04874 152 109 33 10
1388 I thought you said convection 1.3469 0.04695 147 103 37 7
1389 Got it - 2 sticks butter, 3 cups flour, 4 eggs, 1 large file, pinch of salt... 1.3469 0.04889 147 105 33 9
1390 You can’t whisk your way out of this one. 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1391 I'd bail you out, but we just don't have the dough. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1392 Next time wait until after Passover before baking the file into the bread. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1393 Just be honest with me. Did you cook the books? 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1394 But darling, you cooked the books. 1.3467 0.05180 150 111 26 13
1395 But you said the Butler did it! 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1396 Well, I'm a celebrity chef in here. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1397 I see you've taken 'stir-crazy' to a new level. 1.3467 0.04436 150 103 42 5
1398 To think I could have married the butcher, or maybe even the candlestick maker. 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1399 well it should be a comfort anyway that the Coq au Vin really was to die for. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1400 Thirteen?! I thought you said you’d be out in a dozen! 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1401 They say you drowned the butcher and candle stick maker 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1402 And the DA says your broccoli soufflé was even more criminal. 1.3467 0.04633 150 105 38 7
1403 I'm not really waiting for you—I'm waiting for your beignets. 1.3467 0.04633 150 105 38 7
1404 They say you are going to fry 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1405 I know it'll change the flavor, but the file must go INSIDE the cake. 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1406 They all said your duck confit was to die for. Then they all did. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1407 How do you turn on the microwave? 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1408 I'm leaving you for the butcher. 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1409 Your lawyer told me to tell you your 'goose is cooked.' 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1410 The heat is on. 1.3467 0.04633 150 105 38 7
1411 They say you could get a Michelin Star for good behavior. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1412 The children are hungry, but doing ok. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1413 I'm pretty sure they did say you would get "time off for good flavor." 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1414 You’re the chef.... make your own last meal! 1.3467 0.05350 150 113 22 15
1415 Michelin isn’t coming. 1.3467 0.05350 150 113 22 15
1416 They think you cooked up your alibi. 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1417 It doesn't look good. The butcher and the candlestick maker didn't corroborate that you were in the tub with them. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1418 Why don't you arrange a prison bake? 1.3467 0.04436 150 103 42 5
1419 Where did you bury the recipe box? 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1420 They are building their case around the fact your food was to die for. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1421 Don’t take this the wrong way, but your goose is cooked. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1422 Just be grateful you have good knife skills 1.3467 0.04633 150 105 38 7
1423 Now do you believe me? Over seasoning IS a crime. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1424 It was difficult in the beginning, but then I found frozen pizza. 1.3467 0.04535 150 104 40 6
1425 Are they feeding you well? 1.3467 0.04729 150 106 36 8
1426 Just because you have kitchen duty, it doesn't make you a chef. 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1427 I told you the ponzu scheme was a bad idea. 1.3467 0.04729 150 106 36 8
1428 You'll be done in 35-40 minutes. 1.3467 0.04633 150 105 38 7
1429 They know you cooked the books. 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1430 Found someone else to butter my buns... 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1431 I hope you're better at this than you were cooking the books. 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1432 I’m done. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1433 Yes. I'm sure you'll lose at least one star. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1434 You won't be able to toque your way out of this one. 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1435 I told you that cooking meth was not a good idea 1.3467 0.05180 150 111 26 13
1436 What? They're giving you 13 years instead of 12? 1.3467 0.05350 150 113 22 15
1437 Bad news: ‘Let him simmer,’ the judge said. 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1438 The butcher and the candlestick maker refuse to corroborate your alibi. 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1439 How much thyme did you get? 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1440 Bail is set at five hundred loaves, I just don't have that kind of dough... 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1441 When your friends called you a killer of a cook, I had no idea. 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1442 Your attorney says he doesn’t think you can beat the wrap. 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1443 Well, I just don’t think that’s what they meant by “Beat Bobby Flay.” 1.3467 0.05266 150 112 24 14
1444 Well you're getting the chair for sure, but at least you have five stars on yelp. 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1445 Well obviously, I called it in because I believe overcooking Kobe beef IS criminal. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1446 I told you putting pineapple on pizza was a crime. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1447 This is what you get for cooking the books. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1448 I don't think that's what he meant when he said your peach cobbler was to die for. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1449 I’d like to put in an order for the evening of April 7, 2048. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1450 They’re holding me in contempt for not revealing my sauces. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1451 Oh, yes, and for the death by chocolate cake, Elaine wants your recipe. 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1452 It's not your fault. You did warn him that the spaghetti was to die for. 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1453 I thought it was oregano! 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1454 Michelin came. The news is surprisingly good. 1.3467 0.04633 150 105 38 7
1455 Yeah, I can get you a file. Is it all right if I use a mix? 1.3467 0.04729 150 106 36 8
1456 It’s just that I wish we had known that food critics could make citizens arrests. 1.3467 0.05004 150 109 30 11
1457 I told you not to wear that hat in court. 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1458 Ok fine, I'll post bail. But only because I haven't eaten since you've been in here. 1.3467 0.04914 150 108 32 10
1459 Now we’re getting complaints from the inmates too. 1.3467 0.04535 150 104 40 6
1460 Why didn't you just leave the gun and take the cannoli? 1.3467 0.05350 150 113 22 15
1461 On the bright side, we see each more often now. 1.3467 0.04822 150 107 34 9
1462 How much dough do I need to bail you out? 1.3467 0.05093 150 110 28 12
1463 Didn't I tell you to take the red herring off the menu? 1.3464 0.04758 153 109 35 9
1464 I am your lawyer and they have no case for paddy cake being inappropriate touching. 1.3464 0.04847 153 110 33 10
1465 We're starving. 1.3446 0.05226 148 110 25 13
1466 Oh... so that's what the secret ingredient was... 1.3446 0.05047 148 108 29 11
1467 Ok, flour, eggs, sugar and a file. Bake at 350.... 1.3446 0.04766 148 105 35 8
1468 Is it possible that you overreacted to the 'no substitutions' policy? 1.3446 0.04766 148 105 35 8
1469 Cooking the books doesn’t make you a chef. 1.3446 0.04955 148 107 31 10
1470 You promised me you would stop cooking the books. 1.3446 0.04955 148 107 31 10
1471 Bad news. Chef Boyardee flipped on you. 1.3446 0.04669 148 104 37 7
1472 This is goodbye, Henri. I found where you hid the stolen truffles. Your sous chef and I are moving to Paris. 1.3446 0.04862 148 106 33 9
1473 What do you mean, you 'reduced' the Saucier? 1.3446 0.05226 148 110 25 13
1474 So are you you a top chef or a bottom chef? 1.3446 0.05226 148 110 25 13
1475 I told you it was a half baked plan. 1.3446 0.04955 148 107 31 10
1476 Don't you think they'll find a cake rather suspicious? 1.3446 0.04862 148 106 33 9
1477 The judge says the assault charges can be dropped, but your béchamel is unforgivable. 1.3446 0.04862 148 106 33 9
1478 The DA it's now claiming that you, the butcher, and the candle maker conspired together in some kind of "rub-a-dub-dub" con game. 1.3446 0.05138 148 109 27 12
1479 You want me to bring you a cake? Wouldn’t that look suspicious? 1.3446 0.04669 148 104 37 7
1480 If no one respects you get rid of that hat 1.3446 0.04955 148 107 31 10
1481 They say it was you who left the cake out in the rain, annoying millions. 1.3446 0.04955 148 107 31 10
1482 The judge denied your request for kale. 1.3446 0.04669 148 104 37 7
1483 The only things you know how to cook are the books. 1.3446 0.04569 148 103 39 6
1484 Two stars and time served. 1.3446 0.04862 148 106 33 9
1485 You fought the Loire and the Loire won. 1.3446 0.04862 148 106 33 9
1486 I warned you not to stir the pot 1.3446 0.05047 148 108 29 11
1487 To be fair, the bisque was criminally underseasoned. 1.3446 0.04766 148 105 35 8
1488 All he did was ask for ketchup. 1.3446 0.05138 148 109 27 12
1489 This is what happens when you cook the books... 1.3446 0.04955 148 107 31 10
1490 If I knew you were coming, I'd of baked a cake. 1.3446 0.05314 148 111 23 14
1491 They said 15 to 20 or until you have a nice golden brown crust. 1.3446 0.04669 148 104 37 7
1492 They know you cooked the books. 1.3446 0.05047 148 108 29 11
1493 I told you not to call it ‘death by chocolate.’ 1.3446 0.04766 148 105 35 8
1494 Don’t worry I tossed the ratatouille in the river. 1.3446 0.04669 148 104 37 7
1495 You’ll be eligible for parole after dessert. 1.3446 0.04569 148 103 39 6
1496 So out of the pot and into the fryin pan eh? 1.3446 0.04669 148 104 37 7
1497 Can you go over the specials again? 1.3446 0.04766 148 105 35 8
1498 It was your Creme Brulee that was the killer. 1.3425 0.04805 146 104 34 8
1499 Yes, I moved your roast to the slow cooker. 1.3425 0.04604 146 102 38 6
1500 The real crime is what you’ve done to my hips. 1.3425 0.04805 146 104 34 8
1501 Well, Dear, I did warn you not to cook the books. 1.3425 0.04805 146 104 34 8
1502 No, I don't think the cake thing will work. 1.3425 0.04902 146 105 32 9
1503 The soufflé didn't make it. 1.3425 0.05091 146 107 28 11
1504 They're pushing for death by lethal confection. 1.3425 0.04902 146 105 32 9
1505 Honey, I told you not to e-mail that recipe to the Russians. 1.3425 0.05274 146 109 24 13
1506 I think he’ll sous 1.3425 0.04706 146 103 36 7
1507 Our butcher and candlestick maker miss you. 1.3425 0.04902 146 105 32 9
1508 Vladimir didn’t care for the dessert. 1.3425 0.05091 146 107 28 11
1509 Loving you was a recipe for disaster. 1.3425 0.04805 146 104 34 8
1510 Mr. Corleone said, "The heat was on and he needed a patsy crook," not a pastry cook! 1.3425 0.05091 146 107 28 11
1511 I told you not to buy meat from that barber. 1.3425 0.05091 146 107 28 11
1512 They said you need another five to ten. 1.3425 0.04998 146 106 30 10
1513 I am truly sorry. My cell phone autocorrected my text. I wanted you to find an excellent Stollen recipe. 1.3425 0.04706 146 103 36 7
1514 The lawyer says he's going to knead more dough. 1.3425 0.04394 146 100 42 4
1515 " Anyway, we changed the chef's special to "Thyme and a half ". 1.3425 0.04998 146 106 30 10
1516 We’ve been over this: when you pay for a dozen, you don’t take thirteen! 1.3425 0.04706 146 103 36 7
1517 Bad news, I think you're cooked. 1.3425 0.05183 146 108 26 12
1518 I’ve purchased the file. All I need now is your recipe for the cake. 1.3425 0.04706 146 103 36 7
1519 About that bun in the oven... 1.3425 0.04706 146 103 36 7
1520 How's playing dress-up working out for you in there? 1.3425 0.05091 146 107 28 11
1521 I told you they had a zero-tolerance policy when it comes to gluten. 1.3425 0.04500 146 101 40 5
1522 Look, after that disaster in the Hamptons this is the only gig I could get you! 1.3425 0.04805 146 104 34 8
1523 Nothing available on Friday, but I can see you again Saturday at 5:30, 6:15 or 9:00pm. 1.3425 0.04805 146 104 34 8
1524 You never should have cooked the books... 1.3425 0.04805 146 104 34 8
1525 The good news is you were just awarded your second Michelin Star... 1.3425 0.04902 146 105 32 9
1526 I’ve already lost ten pounds. 1.3425 0.04604 146 102 38 6
1527 Honey, that's not what he meant when he said your soufflé was to die for. 1.3425 0.04706 146 103 36 7
1528 Well honey, at least you can look forward to a delicious final meal. 1.3423 0.04545 149 104 39 6
1529 I have the file, but you have to tell me how to bake the cake. 1.3423 0.04835 149 107 33 9
1530 Anything you knead? 1.3423 0.04444 149 103 41 5
1531 Cooking the books, huh? 1.3423 0.04740 149 106 35 8
1532 Dessert, desert ... Poisson - 1.3404 0.05016 141 102 30 9
1533 This was not the way to go to prove to the food critic you have a recipe to die for. 1.3404 0.04914 141 101 32 8
1534 So I told the nice detective that you saved your special Oil de Hemlock for dishes you made for very select customers who came in after hours to settle up, what ever that means. Was that OK, honey? 1.3404 0.04809 141 100 34 7
1535 I told you that dough was dirty. 1.3404 0.04250 141 95 44 2
1536 They've got you for murder -- turns out gluten intolerance is a real thing. 1.3403 0.05136 144 106 27 11
1537 I'm leaving you for the candlestick maker 1.3403 0.05041 144 105 29 10
1538 Yes...one cup flour, half cup sugar...good...one teaspoon vanilla, a half teaspoon cyanide....OK, now that's where I think you went wrong. 1.3401 0.04969 147 107 30 10
1539 If it's any consolation, they told me you will fry in hell. 1.3380 0.04568 142 99 38 5
1540 It's not good - they found sauce everywhere. 1.3380 0.05182 142 105 26 11
1541 I suppose the goose is cooked. 1.3380 0.04781 142 101 34 7
1542 Can't you just knead the Fifth? 1.3380 0.05182 142 105 26 11
1543 I was cooking the books and there was a rat in the kitchen. 1.3380 0.05085 142 104 28 10
1544 And you’re sure they’re all out of jumpsuits? 1.3380 0.05085 142 104 28 10
1545 Do they know you stole Aunt Mary's recipes too? 1.3380 0.04676 142 100 36 6
1546 I told you not to make Russian Dressing for the Inaugural dinner. 1.3380 0.04885 142 102 32 8
1547 I thought that declining a Michelin star wasn´t a crime. 1.3380 0.04676 142 100 36 6
1548 Whatever you do, don’t tell the other inmates you love butter! 1.3380 0.05085 142 104 28 10
1549 When the Times said your puttanesca was criminal, I never thought they’d go this far. 1.3380 0.05182 142 105 26 11
1550 I thought you were kidding! But I still get two more wishes, right? 1.3380 0.04885 142 102 32 8
1551 Our phone sex is getting a little awkward these days. 1.3380 0.04986 142 103 30 9
1552 I think you need to dial back the Death by Chocolate recipe. 1.3380 0.04885 142 102 32 8
1553 Don’t you think youcould have chosen a better alias than Chef Boyardee? 1.3380 0.04885 142 102 32 8
1554 What you did to the broccoli rabe was a crime. 1.3380 0.05372 142 107 22 13
1555 Clyde, I'm sorry to tell you this but I've decided to go gluten free while you're in here. 1.3380 0.05085 142 104 28 10
1556 The timer still has ten years on it. 1.3380 0.05085 142 104 28 10
1557 It might be "Farm to Table" but it's still illegal in this State. 1.3380 0.04781 142 101 34 7
1558 Did you cook the books? 1.3380 0.04986 142 103 30 9
1559 You'll serve 8 to 10 courses, with no possibility of profiteroles. 1.3380 0.04986 142 103 30 9
1560 Tell me it's not true Pierre! Tell me you didn't cook the books! 1.3380 0.05372 142 107 22 13
1561 Then stop wearing the hat if the guards are making fun of you! 1.3380 0.04986 142 103 30 9
1562 I told you that "chopped" is metaphorical. 1.3380 0.04781 142 101 34 7
1563 They did not really mean death by chocolate. 1.3380 0.04885 142 102 32 8
1564 I couldn’t find a gluten free saw in the hardware aisle. 1.3380 0.05278 142 106 24 12
1565 From now on, I'm calling you Chef Boy RU Dumb. 1.3380 0.05372 142 107 22 13
1566 So you finally got caught with your hand in the cookie jar. 1.3380 0.04885 142 102 32 8
1567 The kids keep asking me, "When is dinner going to be ready?" 1.3380 0.04781 142 101 34 7
1568 Two counts fraud, one count embezzlement – and just a pinch of assault. 1.3380 0.05182 142 105 26 11
1569 When your involuntary manslaughter sentence is up, I'd like you to cater a birthday party for my mother-in-law. 1.3358 0.04999 137 99 30 8
1570 Who would've thought that Special Counsel Mueller's ever-expanding investigation would eventually ensnare the White House Chef? 1.3357 0.04926 140 101 31 8
1571 Your lawyer is still working on the mix-up that you worked for the Culinary Institute of America -- not the Central Intelligence Agency. 1.3357 0.05423 140 106 21 13
1572 You had your cake. Then you had to go and eat it.. 1.3357 0.04713 140 99 35 6
1573 If someone asks to frost your cupcake, just say no. 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1574 What's the recipe, Kenneth? 1.3357 0.05609 140 108 17 15
1575 It's nice they're keeping you busy. 1.3357 0.05327 140 105 23 12
1576 Fugu, smugu,”you said. “ It’s only a fish. 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1577 All she wanted was the dressing on the side. 1.3357 0.04926 140 101 31 8
1578 The chickens ask how it feels to live in a cage? 1.3357 0.04713 140 99 35 6
1579 I know Gordon Ramsay was asking for it, but all the same.... 1.3357 0.05230 140 104 25 11
1580 I told you not to do the crime if you couldn't handle the thyme. 1.3357 0.05230 140 104 25 11
1581 I didn't mean to write such a punishing review. 1.3357 0.05327 140 105 23 12
1582 On the bright side, how many people can say they beat Bobby Flay? 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1583 I'd like to place a to go order… 1.3357 0.04926 140 101 31 8
1584 One more time, how many parts flour to hacksaw? 1.3357 0.04713 140 99 35 6
1585 You must have known the food blogs would never let you get away with it. Cabernet and Cod, my god. 1.3357 0.05230 140 104 25 11
1586 Remember what Julia said: never apologize. 1.3357 0.04713 140 99 35 6
1587 The reviews were not great. 1.3357 0.04821 140 100 33 7
1588 Sweetheart — death by chocolate is a metaphor. 1.3357 0.04926 140 101 31 8
1589 I followed your instructions, but I still couldn't raise the dough. 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1590 Simple. Cook the book, and they book the cook. 1.3357 0.05517 140 107 19 14
1591 I have just one question, why didn't you blame it on the butler? 1.3357 0.04713 140 99 35 6
1592 You should know that I’ve been having fast food. 1.3357 0.05230 140 104 25 11
1593 They want to know where you've hidden the dough. 1.3357 0.05230 140 104 25 11
1594 Can I get something to go? 1.3357 0.05517 140 107 19 14
1595 Do I even want to ask how the food is? 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1596 I’m sorry honey but, as good as your food is, your prices really are a crime 1.3357 0.05130 140 103 27 10
1597 In America, 'to die for' is just an expression. He was trying to compliment your beef bourguignon. 1.3357 0.05130 140 103 27 10
1598 First of all, your final appeal has been denied. And even more disappointing, you cannot prepare your last meal. 1.3357 0.05130 140 103 27 10
1599 Yes, I know the cake is cliche, but it's simply impossible to hide a file in an amuse-bouche. 1.3357 0.04821 140 100 33 7
1600 Look, I'm sorry honey, but when you put the peas in the guacamole I had to report you. 1.3357 0.05130 140 103 27 10
1601 Both the butcher and candlestick maker deny you were in the tub... 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1602 How do I boil an egg? 1.3357 0.05230 140 104 25 11
1603 I'm guessing you're in for cooking the books. 1.3357 0.04373 140 96 41 3
1604 It's more flattering than the stripes. 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1605 So what did the Butcher and the Candlestick Maker get, 1 to 3 years with time off for good behavior? Did the jury even look at those guys? 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1606 What do you mean, there are all vegans in here? 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1607 You left the oven on. 1.3357 0.05517 140 107 19 14
1608 I'm sorry, your lawyer is better in bed and he is home by 6. 1.3357 0.05327 140 105 23 12
1609 Sorry, they say your goose is cooked and you're going to fry. 1.3357 0.05327 140 105 23 12
1610 He stole the cookie from the cookie jar? That's it? 1.3357 0.05130 140 103 27 10
1611 The food is to die for" is merely an expression. 1.3357 0.04713 140 99 35 6
1612 Yes, but besides the file, did you like the cake? 1.3357 0.05130 140 103 27 10
1613 Good, you got the costume. I hid the jail blueprints in the hat. 1.3357 0.05230 140 104 25 11
1614 I knew it. You WERE cooking the books. 1.3357 0.05327 140 105 23 12
1615 What do you mean you forgot to bake the key in? 1.3357 0.05029 140 102 29 9
1616 The Gingerbread Man's family doesn't blame you for what happened. 1.3357 0.04754 143 102 34 7
1617 I'm here to whisk you away... Get it? 1.3357 0.04957 143 104 30 9
1618 I told you to let me cook the books. 1.3357 0.05055 143 105 28 10
1619 I told you not to spill the beans! 1.3333 0.05278 138 103 24 11
1620 So...they let you keep the hat. 1.3333 0.04751 138 98 34 6
1621 I desserting you. 1.3333 0.05177 138 102 26 10
1622 I can smuggle in a zester, but that’s it! 1.3333 0.04522 138 96 38 4
1623 About the flour. . .do I sift before measuring or measure before sifting? 1.3333 0.04897 141 102 31 8
1624 I've been served. 1.3333 0.04638 138 97 36 5
1625 Cocktail weenies in barbecue sauce for a first course? Honestly, you have only yourself to blame. 1.3333 0.04751 138 98 34 6
1626 I need your cake recipe. 1.3333 0.05177 138 102 26 10
1627 Just tell me, where's all the dough? 1.3333 0.04818 135 96 33 6
1628 you really think you're going to get a rise out of me? 1.3333 0.05074 138 101 28 9
1629 But Maurice, you spatchcocked the sous chef! 1.3333 0.04968 138 100 30 8
1630 A pea bargain is your best shot. 1.3333 0.05475 138 105 20 13
1631 Your lawyer says you're going to flambé. 1.3333 0.05177 138 102 26 10
1632 I told you not to do it. Pineapple? On pizza? 1.3333 0.05074 138 101 28 9
1633 No! Really? You think the butler did it? 1.3333 0.04861 138 99 32 7
1634 The real crime was dessert 1.3333 0.05177 138 102 26 10
1635 So do you think you'll be home in time to fix supper? 1.3333 0.04968 138 100 30 8
1636 "Don't look at me. I told you it was a recipe for disaster. 1.3333 0.05278 138 103 24 11
1637 I'm dating the assistant manager at McDonalds. 1.3333 0.05278 138 103 24 11
1638 No, I didn't realize impersonating a chef was a crime either. 1.3333 0.04861 138 99 32 7
1639 I told you it was a crime serving caviar on Triscuits 1.3333 0.04792 141 101 33 7
1640 You were chasing a gingerbread man through TSA? 1.3333 0.05294 141 106 23 12
1641 They say white is the new orange. 1.3333 0.04638 138 97 36 5
1642 I've been charged with death by chocolate -- tell my lawyer that a plain vanilla defense simply will not suffice. 1.3333 0.04751 138 98 34 6
1643 Honey, I swear I thought it was oregano! 1.3333 0.04861 138 99 32 7
1644 I want all my meals to be like it was my last. 1.3333 0.04751 138 98 34 6
1645 A cake 'to die for' is just an expression, Dear. 1.3333 0.05177 138 102 26 10
1646 I'm leaving you Marcel. Mother was right. You ARE a bad egg. 1.3333 0.05074 138 101 28 9
1647 I told you they take the secret sauce very seriously. 1.3333 0.04861 138 99 32 7
1648 They found traces of truffle on the blade. 1.3333 0.05278 138 103 24 11
1649 When I said you have to kill the cow first, I didn't mean my mother! 1.3333 0.05278 138 103 24 11
1650 Sorry Charles, I spilled the beans. 1.3333 0.04968 138 100 30 8
1651 I hear you have flipped for the Special Counsel. 1.3333 0.04861 138 99 32 7
1652 First, the good news. Oklahoma called. They want that recipe for a lethal cocktail. 1.3333 0.05377 138 104 22 12
1653 I'm sorry that this is the way the cookie crumbled. 1.3333 0.04751 138 98 34 6
1654 I wouldn't this personally...He's getting rid of just about everybody in the W.H. these days. 1.3333 0.05475 138 105 20 13
1655 I guess that appointment as "Official Chef to the President" didn't work out. 1.3333 0.04968 138 100 30 8
1656 The lawyer says that for "death by chocolate" you might get five-to-ten. 1.3333 0.05074 138 101 28 9
1657 Ted, he said he wanted his STEAK bloody. 1.3333 0.04751 138 98 34 6
1658 You'll get early release if you tell them where you've stashed the dough. 1.3333 0.04861 138 99 32 7
1659 Remember how I told you the prices you charge are criminal? 1.3333 0.04861 138 99 32 7
1660 Hey there, What´s cookin´! 1.3333 0.05278 138 103 24 11
1661 You obviously misunderstood your boss when he told you to cook the books. 1.3309 0.04831 139 100 32 7
1662 It doesn't matter that you dressed up like a chef; microwaving fish in the office break room is still a felony. 1.3309 0.05145 139 103 26 10
1663 Apparently, overcooking pasta in Italy really IS a crime 1.3309 0.04938 139 101 30 8
1664 I suppose it’s better than being a jailhouse lawyer. 1.3309 0.04902 136 98 31 7
1665 Not sure why. I just have this strange feeling that your goose is cooked. 1.3309 0.04902 136 98 31 7
1666 Vito wants to know where you stashed the dough. 1.3309 0.05328 136 102 23 11
1667 Honey , your lawyer just said your goose is cooked. 1.3309 0.05224 136 101 25 10
1668 I told you that making a giant sandwich and putting it on the subway tracks was a bad idea! 1.3309 0.05224 136 101 25 10
1669 Ready to reveal your killer secret ingredient now? 1.3309 0.05224 136 101 25 10
1670 You and your Death by Chocolate recipe! 1.3309 0.05224 136 101 25 10
1671 They found the gluten. 1.3309 0.05328 136 102 23 11
1672 The verdict said, "Let sit 3-5 years, then fry." 1.3309 0.04902 136 98 31 7
1673 Let me get this straight -- 3 cups of flour, cocoa butter, nutmeg and a hacksaw blade. 1.3309 0.05119 136 100 27 9
1674 "I just need to know why you left the cake out in the rain". 1.3309 0.05328 136 102 23 11
1675 You were still using trans fats? 1.3309 0.04902 136 98 31 7
1676 They seized everything, even the sourdough starter. 1.3309 0.05011 136 99 29 8
1677 Take the plea bargain or they could drop you to one star. 1.3309 0.04902 136 98 31 7
1678 I have the hacksaw all ready... when can you smuggle out the cake? 1.3309 0.05429 136 103 21 12
1679 If I told you once I told you a thousand times, Arsnic is not a spice! 1.3309 0.05429 136 103 21 12
1680 I told you the "Kiss the Cook" apron wouldn't fly in the #metoo era. 1.3309 0.05011 136 99 29 8
1681 Seems a bit extreme for a fallen souffle...... 1.3309 0.05119 136 100 27 9
1682 The lawyer said you will serve 10 years, rotate and then serve 5 more years or until you are old and gray. 1.3309 0.04902 136 98 31 7
1683 Carl, I’ve heard of joining gangs in prison to protect yourself, but couldn’t you have picked one with a more intimidating uniform? 1.3309 0.05224 136 101 25 10
1684 Hope you fry! 1.3309 0.05328 136 102 23 11
1685 I told you that mixing red wine with fish was a crime, but you wouldn't listen. 1.3309 0.05011 136 99 29 8
1686 Tell me, Louie, what did you do with the dough? 1.3309 0.05224 136 101 25 10
1687 I need your cake recipe. 1.3309 0.05119 136 100 27 9
1688 When they said they wanted a souffle to die for, it was just a figure of speech. 1.3309 0.05429 136 103 21 12
1689 Bad news, I'm afraid your goose is cooked. 1.3309 0.04674 136 96 35 5
1690 No. 'Glu-ten'. Not 'Putin.' 1.3309 0.05011 136 99 29 8
1691 Honey, that souffle WAS a crime. 1.3309 0.05429 136 103 21 12
1692 I can't believe that they figured out that you were an impasta the whole time! 1.3309 0.05011 136 99 29 8
1693 For God's sake, your boss is a clown and it's just a hamburger. Tell them the formula for the secret sauce. 1.3309 0.05119 136 100 27 9
1694 Listen, Maurice, I need some more dough. 1.3309 0.05328 136 102 23 11
1695 Turns out your eclairs really were to die for. 1.3309 0.05328 136 102 23 11
1696 He will think twice asking for Ketchup again. 1.3309 0.04789 136 97 33 6
1697 I told you that using Velvetta in that dish was a crime. 1.3309 0.04902 136 98 31 7
1698 It's a little late to debate whether "well done" is or is not criminal. 1.3309 0.05119 136 100 27 9
1699 Your goose is cooked. They're going to allow the blackbirds' wives and kids to testify. 1.3308 0.04859 133 95 32 6
1700 I told you not to steal the dough. 1.3285 0.05192 137 102 25 10
1701 I’m afraid the Judge found that you cooked the books—and that your alibi was half-baked. 1.3285 0.05087 137 101 27 9
1702 You do realize that "to die for" is just an expression. 1.3285 0.05192 137 102 25 10
1703 The prosecutor says the cake was to die for. 1.3285 0.04760 137 98 33 6
1704 The judge said you needed a little more seasoning. 1.3284 0.05273 134 100 24 10
1705 Sooner or later, I sure you'll get used to margarine. 1.3284 0.05056 134 98 28 8
1706 The lawyer is working on your change of menu request. 1.3284 0.04711 134 95 34 5
1707 Your insanity plea qualifies you for the head-chef position. 1.3284 0.05378 134 101 22 11
1708 As it turns out, your bœuf Bourguignon actually WAS to die for. 1.3284 0.04943 134 97 30 7
1709 Actually, your goose is cooked is the bad news. 1.3284 0.05165 134 99 26 9
1710 Oh Alfred, how many times have I told you not to pick your own mushrooms! 1.3284 0.05165 134 99 26 9
1711 You got the dough? 1.3284 0.05273 134 100 24 10
1712 The uniforms were different in women's prison. 1.3284 0.05165 134 99 26 9
1713 did you say takeout or breakout? 1.3284 0.05165 134 99 26 9
1714 All they had to do was follow the bread crumbs 1.3284 0.05056 134 98 28 8
1715 Tell them where the dough is, dear, and I'm sure they'll let you out. 1.3284 0.05482 134 102 20 12
1716 I'm think your goose is cooked. 1.3284 0.05273 134 100 24 10
1717 Could I get something to go? 1.3284 0.05056 134 98 28 8
1718 No! The plan was for ME to take the fall and YOU were going to bake the cake with the file in it! 1.3284 0.05165 134 99 26 9
1719 There's some good news! You won't lose any Michelin stars. 1.3259 0.05344 135 102 22 11
1720 There wasn't enough dough to bribe the jury. 1.3259 0.05646 135 105 16 14
1721 When those critics said your food was a crime against humanity, I didn't think they'd actually charge you! 1.3259 0.05239 135 101 24 10
1722 Exactly how many truffles does one have to steal to get 20 years in prison? 1.3259 0.05024 135 99 28 8
1723 The White House believes you're the leak about the president's preference for fast foods. 1.3258 0.05323 132 99 23 10
1724 You've bitten off more than you can chew this time. 1.3258 0.04986 132 96 29 7
1725 The proof is in the pudding? But we ate it last night. 1.3258 0.05213 132 98 25 9
1726 Just tell the jury that you couldn't create an omelette without breaking some legs. 1.3258 0.05101 132 97 27 8
1727 I told you somebody would notice the difference between "un plat de poisson" and "un plat de poison". 1.3258 0.05213 132 98 25 9
1728 Cut the confession Phil. I only care if my cake will be ready Thursday. 1.3258 0.05213 132 98 25 9
1729 You’ll be gluten free in 5 years with good behavior. 1.3258 0.05213 132 98 25 9
1730 Why did you do it, sweetheart? We had plenty of dough. 1.3258 0.04986 132 96 29 7
1731 The chicken's family is suing. 1.3258 0.05430 132 100 21 11
1732 So cooking a filet mignon well-done is literally a crime? 1.3258 0.04749 132 94 33 5
1733 A cup of sugar, two eggs, a soupçon of nutmeg and then the file? 1.3258 0.04869 132 95 31 6
1734 The lawyer said you're looking at a baker's dozen... 1.3258 0.04869 132 95 31 6
1735 I told you, a ‘Trump in the Dump’ cake was a bad idea. 1.3258 0.05639 132 102 17 13
1736 Well, the lawyer says you'll be in long enough to make this place a Michelin 3-star. 1.3258 0.04869 132 95 31 6
1737 I warned you not to mess with vegans! 1.3258 0.05101 132 97 27 8
1738 When you first told me you worked at a high volume eatery, I pictured something different. 1.3258 0.04869 132 95 31 6
1739 They found evidence that you colluded with Russians on your borscht. 1.3258 0.04986 132 96 29 7
1740 "Mrs. Candlestick maker" just has a better ring to it given the circumstances 1.3258 0.05213 132 98 25 9
1741 Who knew "Oysters a la Trump" was a food crime in Manhattan? 1.3258 0.05101 132 97 27 8
1742 Let's face it. You were 'Chopped'. 1.3258 0.05101 132 97 27 8
1743 After you cooked the books you could have flamed them. 1.3258 0.05101 132 97 27 8
1744 I've got one in the oven. 1.3258 0.05323 132 99 23 10
1745 I'm working on your bail -- but they want the bouillabaisse recipe as collateral. 1.3258 0.05323 132 99 23 10
1746 The DA says your story is half-baked at best. 1.3258 0.04749 132 94 33 5
1747 I swear I didn't tell them anything, but they found the kimchi you buried in the yard. 1.3258 0.04749 132 94 33 5
1748 Read your tweets! The White House has doubled down, accusing you of using 'fake recipes'! and what do you know about a non-disclosure with Betty Crocker? 1.3258 0.05213 132 98 25 9
1749 You knew chablis with beef was a crime, but you still did it anyway. 1.3258 0.04498 132 92 37 3
1750 Yes, I'm sure the food in there does suck. 1.3258 0.04625 132 93 35 4
1751 Oh, one more thing...the dish ran away with the spoon. 1.3258 0.05536 132 101 19 12
1752 I don't like it either, but if Big Cletus says you look sexy in it, you'd better not take it off. 1.3258 0.04986 132 96 29 7
1753 Honey, 'to die for' is just an expression. 1.3258 0.05323 132 99 23 10
1754 And I'll need that to go. 1.3258 0.04869 132 95 31 6
1755 Hello, I'm your sue chef. 1.3258 0.05213 132 98 25 9
1756 Don't worry. I'm cooking up a scheme to get you out. 1.3258 0.04986 132 96 29 7
1757 The proof was in the pudding? Really, Bob? 1.3258 0.05536 132 101 19 12
1758 I warned you about cooking the books. 1.3258 0.05101 132 97 27 8
1759 He wasn't being literal when he said he'd die for your tiramisu. 1.3258 0.04749 132 94 33 5
1760 I'm sorry, but I just can't keep my oven pre-heated for you. 1.3258 0.05101 132 97 27 8
1761 They're calling you the Behind Iron Bars Chef. 1.3258 0.04625 132 93 35 4
1762 I’m hearing the candlestick-maker has turned state’s witness. 1.3258 0.04869 132 95 31 6
1763 Just be honest, did you cook the books or not? 1.3258 0.05101 132 97 27 8
1764 You must've known that family thought 'Death by Chocolate' was the name of the cake. 1.3258 0.05430 132 100 21 11
1765 Pierre, just give them the recipe and this will all go away. 1.3258 0.05536 132 101 19 12
1766 We really need to know what’s in that secret sauce. 1.3258 0.05101 132 97 27 8
1767 The soufflé was to die for. 1.3258 0.05101 132 97 27 8
1768 This will teach you to check the expiration date. 1.3258 0.05213 132 98 25 9
1769 Your avocado toast killed again. Only you can make it stop. 1.3258 0.05323 132 99 23 10
1770 You should know, I've started dating again. You might know them -- the butcher and candlestick maker? 1.3237 0.05228 139 105 23 11
1771 Just tell me, did I eat your victims? 1.3233 0.05395 133 101 21 11
1772 By the way, honey...your goose is cooked. 1.3233 0.04471 133 93 37 3
1773 When they said you could get one to three I don’t think they meant Michelin stars. 1.3233 0.04838 133 96 31 6
1774 Your fingerprints were all over the knives. 1.3233 0.04719 133 95 33 5
1775 I told you not to work in the White House. 1.3231 0.05484 130 99 20 11
1776 half-baked excuses Tony 1.3231 0.05147 130 96 26 8
1777 The jury was willing to overlook the burnt shish kabob, but not the skewered sous chef 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1778 Are you sure you didn't add gluten? 1.3231 0.04787 130 93 32 5
1779 Your parole officer says to keep you in at 78 degrees for 7 years. 1.3231 0.04787 130 93 32 5
1780 I know you didn't cook the books. Just tell them where to find the dough. 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1781 OK, One more time, do I chill the file before I fold it into the egg whites or not? 1.3231 0.05030 130 95 28 7
1782 How could you have done that, Howard? Ketchup? Really?! 1.3231 0.05374 130 98 22 10
1783 Your attorney says your goose is cooked 1.3231 0.05484 130 99 20 11
1784 Well what did you expect, Charles? You served them kale... 1.3231 0.04787 130 93 32 5
1785 350 degrees for 5 to 10 years. Got it. 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1786 The cops found the dough. 1.3231 0.05147 130 96 26 8
1787 Don’t worry about the dough. 1.3231 0.05030 130 95 28 7
1788 That really was a killer soufflé 1.3231 0.05374 130 98 22 10
1789 I guess it really was a killer recipe 1.3231 0.05484 130 99 20 11
1790 So what did you put in the Chef's Surprise this time? 1.3231 0.05030 130 95 28 7
1791 Honestly, I didn't think your souffle was that bad. 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1792 I hope you cook up a better scheme next time. 1.3231 0.05147 130 96 26 8
1793 I'm leaving you for my butcher. I only wanted you for your dough anyway. 1.3231 0.05591 130 100 18 12
1794 I can get you some dough if you think you'll knead it. 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1795 Celebrity Chefs Behind Bars called - you're featured in next month's show. 1.3231 0.05147 130 96 26 8
1796 At home I couldn't even get you to boil water. 1.3231 0.05030 130 95 28 7
1797 You serve liver Jello and expected no consequences? 1.3231 0.05030 130 95 28 7
1798 Cutthroat Kitchen is just a name! 1.3231 0.05030 130 95 28 7
1799 Give 'em the secret sauce recipe and you'll be out in less than six months 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1800 You're in for cooking the books, that doesn't make you a cook. 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1801 But you didn’t have to cook the books. 1.3231 0.05484 130 99 20 11
1802 I know you're innocent dear, but they pulled six of your knives out of Gordon Ramsay. 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1803 So, should we change the menu in five years? 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1804 I know you like to please your customers, darling, but the order was for "Three filet mignons," not "Three filleted minions." 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1805 If you plead guilty to beating the eggs, the D.A. will let you slide on the salt charge. 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1806 I miss your muffins... 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1807 You can’t keep decking people who say their favorite restaurant is Olive Garden. This is my last visit. 1.3231 0.05147 130 96 26 8
1808 The Sous Chef plans to sue, Chef. 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1809 Remember to shiv the biggest guy in the yard and let 'em know you ain't anybody's sous chef. 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1810 The kitchen had a rat. 1.3231 0.05147 130 96 26 8
1811 Grated parmesan on seafood risotto? Criminal. 1.3231 0.04531 130 91 36 3
1812 I know was a horrible review, honey, but the meat cleaver was probably not the best way to respond. 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1813 Don't worry, I hid the money among your recipes. No one will ever look there. 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1814 I wanted you to know I am leaving you and I am taking the Le Creuset with me. 1.3231 0.04787 130 93 32 5
1815 Just tell me where you hid the dough 1.3231 0.05484 130 99 20 11
1816 Look at the bright side, you're finally head chef of somewhere. 1.3231 0.05374 130 98 22 10
1817 They say the shoe print in the ketchup matches yours. 1.3231 0.05147 130 96 26 8
1818 Fifteen to life and you're worried about the mise en place? 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1819 I'll never forget you, Boyardee. 1.3231 0.04787 130 93 32 5
1820 The DA is offering a life sentence or death by chocolate. 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1821 Sorry, we don’t have the bread to make your bail!! 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1822 Martha Stewart says, 'Stay away from the meatloaf.' 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1823 The eggs are pressing charges.... 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1824 I told you he only eats fast foods; it's his way of making America great- hates French anything! 1.3231 0.05147 130 96 26 8
1825 So what if she thought it needed salt? 1.3231 0.05147 130 96 26 8
1826 You didn't leave me enough dough to pay your bail. 1.3231 0.04787 130 93 32 5
1827 So that bank job wasn't a piece of cake after all? 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
1828 So you really did create a killer menu for restaurant reviewers. 1.3231 0.05147 130 96 26 8
1829 I know, Honey. It's not your fault the President didn't like your Tarte Flambe´. 1.3231 0.05591 130 100 18 12
1830 When they said “Death By Chocolate” they didn’t mean it literally. 1.3231 0.04787 130 93 32 5
1831 Yes, Salmon Creme Brulee is a crime, son. 1.3231 0.05030 130 95 28 7
1832 The judge said your defense was half-baked. 1.3231 0.04910 130 94 30 6
1833 So what half-baked scheme did you get into now? 1.3228 0.04165 127 86 41 0
1834 Okay I'll do it, but if you ask me it sounds like a recipe for disaster. 1.3228 0.04985 127 92 29 6
1835 I TOLD you to stop bragging about your 'killer' chili. 1.3209 0.04923 134 98 29 7
1836 I told you that your food was so good that it should be illegal. 1.3206 0.05338 131 99 22 10
1837 Who eats a meal that is literally worth dying for? 1.3206 0.05447 131 100 20 11
1838 Now that you've cooked the books, the least I can do is to send you the file. 1.3206 0.05227 131 98 24 9
1839 It may have been Michelin Five Star to you, but they’re still all dead. 1.3206 0.05227 131 98 24 9
1840 I have bad news ... it appears those brownies really were to die for. 1.3206 0.05227 131 98 24 9
1841 We're going to need some more dough. 1.3206 0.04879 131 95 30 6
1842 This time your goose is cooked. 1.3206 0.04757 131 94 32 5
1843 Yes Franco, I know he said your risotto was to die for, but honestly... 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1844 I don’t quite know how to break this to you - but your goose is cooked... 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1845 Okay! you win. You make a "killer chili." 1.3203 0.04826 128 92 31 5
1846 Hand over the cobbler recipe and your name gets cleared. 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1847 You know I didn’t literally mean “Death by Chocolate “, right? 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1848 And, since you've been here, the dish ran away with the spoon. 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1849 We know, we know ... your Cassoulet is to die for. No one ever took you seriously. 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1850 Forensics found a DNA match on last Thursday's Meat Pie Special. 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1851 I told the staff at the restaurant to put everything in the SLOW cooker 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1852 They're calling it the, "French Confection." 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1853 Of course we needed the dough. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1854 I told you to keep your hands out of the cookie jar! 1.3203 0.05426 128 97 21 10
1855 I warned you the prix fixe was robbery. 1.3203 0.04697 128 91 33 4
1856 When they said ' You are going to fry for this', I don't think this is what they meant. 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1857 I guess you won't put tomatoes in clam chowder again. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1858 I think the officer meant "parole," not "profiterole." 1.3203 0.04697 128 91 33 4
1859 Forensics just analyzed the secret sauce. 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1860 We're going for an insanitary plea. 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1861 I COULD have married a butcher. Or a candlestick maker. But, NO.... 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1862 All I said was that you had the dough! 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1863 I don't care what the recipe said; you should have never cooked the books. 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1864 Your lawyer thinks that you've got a half-baked alibi. 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1865 Just talked to your lawyer. You're cooked. 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1866 They would've voted to acquit if you hadn't used the kale. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1867 When they said out in thirty, they weren't talking about the souffle. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1868 I'm afraid someone's left your cake out in the rain. 1.3203 0.05649 128 99 17 12
1869 And just how do you propose I smuggle in the saffron and cardamom? 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1870 You can be the leg-iron chef. 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1871 I told you your mother's recipes were deadly. 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1872 But Kevin, of course they can order just desserts. 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1873 Yes, it is a crime to serve a well done filet. 1.3203 0.05426 128 97 21 10
1874 Honey, the bail is either $2,000 or two servings of your quenelles of pike with lobster sauce. 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1875 I didn't think you were going literally 'skewer' the critics. 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1876 I need to know, did it really taste like chicken? 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1877 Marcel, How could you not be sure of those mushrooms! 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1878 Is take-out at all possible? 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1879 As your lawyer, I must warn you that no jury will believe your half-baked alibi and so your goose is cooked. 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1880 Do I add the file before or after the eggs? 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1881 Well, I agree with the president, the entree was appalling, even by Mar-a-Lago standards. 1.3203 0.05649 128 99 17 12
1882 They know you hid the dough. 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1883 I told you already. The proof is in the pudding. 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1884 I'm sorry, I asked for thyme served. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1885 I warned you not to read the Yelp reviews! 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1886 They're saying life with no chance of escarole. 1.3203 0.05426 128 97 21 10
1887 Was it worth it, Steven? Was winning Hell's Kitchen worth it? 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1888 You left a bun in the oven... 1.3203 0.05426 128 97 21 10
1889 You don't know me, but I was in your restaurant last week, loved the tilapia. Can you give me the recipe? 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1890 How much dough did you steal? 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1891 No, I said I wanted the recipe to serve twenty! 1.3203 0.04826 128 92 31 5
1892 I understand you're serving time for cooking the books. 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1893 The children have started calling him 'Daddy Boyardee.' 1.3203 0.04826 128 92 31 5
1894 Don't worry, we'll get you out of here. Just tell me where you hid the dough. 1.3203 0.05539 128 98 19 11
1895 Sorry, he pasta way, so we cannoli do so much. Lettuce get together on a court strategy or you’ll just be a pizza history. 1.3203 0.05426 128 97 21 10
1896 The whole COUNTRY thanks you, Fritz! 1.3203 0.05756 128 100 15 13
1897 They say with good behavior they'll let you out al dente. 1.3203 0.04826 128 92 31 5
1898 So I guess that wasn't tomato sauce after all. 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1899 ...and you have a guest shot on CSI: Iron Chef. 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1900 So, I take it she didn't much enjoy the soup. 1.3203 0.04697 128 91 33 4
1901 Next time don’t cook the books. 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1902 I knew your half baked schemes would land you here 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1903 Let me guess. Another one sent the food back. 1.3203 0.04826 128 92 31 5
1904 You're going to fry, Harry, in clarified butter covered in panko crumbs. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1905 The reviewer said your Foie Gras was a crime against humanity. 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1906 You should have known President Trump likes his Steaks Well-Done! 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1907 Oh, a file in a cake! I thought you wanted a filet. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1908 I told you calling it a 'killer recipe' was a mistake. 1.3203 0.05426 128 97 21 10
1909 For the hundredth time, Gaston -- no fondant., no glazed butter creme pecans , no grappa-infused maraschinos. Just a simple one. With a file. 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1910 I told you it was a crime to use margarine in your pastry. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1911 Why-ever did you have to cook the books! 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1912 When you said your food was to die for, I didn't think you meant it literally. 1.3203 0.05426 128 97 21 10
1913 That’s what you get for joking that you are a cereal killer! 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1914 The lawyer said that your goose is cooked. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1915 I need some more dough. 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1916 Sticky fingers is NOT a defense. 1.3203 0.04826 128 92 31 5
1917 Why couldn't the Michelin people have just taken away a star? 1.3203 0.04697 128 91 33 4
1918 Why wouldn't you want to cook your own last meal? 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1919 I told you the twinkie defense wouldn't work. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1920 I'm sorry, mon cheri, but your coq au vin IS a crime. 1.3203 0.05312 128 96 23 9
1921 I thought Edgar was kidding when he said you were whipping up a criminally decedent dessert. 1.3203 0.04952 128 93 29 6
1922 There's no excuse for robbing that bakery -- No matter how much you kneaded the dough 1.3203 0.05195 128 95 25 8
1923 The alfredo dream again? 1.3203 0.05075 128 94 27 7
1924 Did you really divulge the secret eleven herbs and spices? 1.3203 0.04826 128 92 31 5
1925 Actually, $18 for a cup of soup IS criminal! 1.3185 0.05428 135 104 19 12
1926 Beating people up is illegal, putting ketchup on food is not. 1.3178 0.05160 129 96 25 8
1927 They stuck your whisk where? 1.3178 0.05276 129 97 23 9
1928 Honey, tell uncle Vinnie I need more dough 1.3178 0.05276 129 97 23 9
1929 I'm sorry, I'm leaving you for Chef Boyardee. 1.3178 0.05160 129 96 25 8
1930 I don't think Michelin will be coming back after this. 1.3178 0.04920 129 94 29 6
1931 When you said the spinach puffs were 'to die for' I didn't think you meant literally. 1.3178 0.05276 129 97 23 9
1932 Let me guess . . . Ten years at 350? 1.3178 0.05160 129 96 25 8
1933 Your hash browns tested positive. 1.3178 0.05160 129 96 25 8
1934 told you not to cook the books ! 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1935 It's the candle stick maker, isn't it? 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1936 I suppose I'm to do the dishes then, am I? 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1937 I bet you can cook up some way to get out of this joint. 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1938 They're charging you with bulgary. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1939 Sit tight......I was able to raise some dough. 1.3175 0.04598 126 89 34 3
1940 They'll drop the charges if you bake the cake AND stop asking which one is the bride. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1941 Honey, I don't think calling it 'Chez Big' on your resume is going to help things. 1.3175 0.05363 126 95 22 9
1942 Your story inspired a podcast called ‘Cereal’. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1943 Food to die for? I had no idea! 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1944 I told you the lobster price was criminal. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1945 The cow, fish, chicken and lamb have entered a class action lawsuit. 1.3175 0.05363 126 95 22 9
1946 In the white house no job is safe!!! 1.3175 0.05707 126 98 16 12
1947 I told you he was an impasta. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1948 Do I put the file in the cake before baking or after? 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1949 Just tell me where you stashed the dough! 1.3175 0.05480 126 96 20 10
1950 The clams talked. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1951 So you cooked them a meal to die for? 1.3175 0.04867 126 91 30 5
1952 You’ll get a baker’s dozen to life. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1953 Try not to drop the pastry brush in the shower. 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1954 They said no to the knives but yes to the whisk. 1.3175 0.04867 126 91 30 5
1955 I told you, if you can’t stand the heat... 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1956 What about the dough? 1.3175 0.05363 126 95 22 9
1957 It may be tradition but the judge doesn't think the law entitles you to a 13 person jury. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1958 Good news dear. I convinced the warden to room you with a chap called "the butcher." 1.3175 0.05595 126 97 18 11
1959 I think you've been chopped. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1960 You know that's not what I meant when I said you could "Beat Bobby Flay." 1.3175 0.05480 126 96 20 10
1961 I don’t know if you can lose a Michelin star for cooking the books 1.3175 0.04867 126 91 30 5
1962 Cod wasn’t enough. You just had to try the pufferfish recipe. 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1963 Are you blaming it on the butcher or the candlestick maker this time? 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1964 Where did you plant the dough? 1.3175 0.05595 126 97 18 11
1965 On a positive note, your lawyer thinks you'll get time off for good pesto. 1.3175 0.04867 126 91 30 5
1966 Maybe next time you'll think twice about whipping the cream and beating the eggs. 1.3175 0.05363 126 95 22 9
1967 You should have been more subtle about cooking the books! 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1968 I knew it was a bad sign that the job as White House chef required you to know how to make Borscht. 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1969 I always told you pineapple on pizza was criminal. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1970 Not to worry we found a new chef who is amazing. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1971 You make think this gets you out of making dinner, but you are sadly mistaken. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1972 I should have known when they said your food was to die for. 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1973 I posted bail. They'll remove you in 30 to 45 minutes. 1.3175 0.05480 126 96 20 10
1974 You did warn him that the dessert was 'to die for.' 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1975 Where'd you hide the dough? 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1976 So now you have to bake cakes for rapists, murderers and politicians? 1.3175 0.05363 126 95 22 9
1977 I tried fencing your chili, but it's too hot. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1978 I was going to make you a cake with a file in it, but you never did like my cooking. 1.3175 0.04867 126 91 30 5
1979 I told you... you can't put avacado on everything. 1.3175 0.05480 126 96 20 10
1980 Fold the egg whites and cream of tartar into the soufflé dish. Gently press the hacksaw into the base. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1981 Marinating time: 3-5 years. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1982 The yeast is in the bag, Norm, but this is the last time. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1983 How's the food dear? 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1984 Yes, brought the file. Where’s the cake? 1.3175 0.05363 126 95 22 9
1985 I warned you not to cook the books. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1986 We warned you, but you had to eat your cake too. 1.3175 0.04458 126 88 36 2
1987 "Death by Chocolate" was just a figure of speech, darling. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1988 We get 13 minutes instead of 12. 1.3175 0.05595 126 97 18 11
1989 I never realized stealing a recipe was crime. 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1990 The guards will get suspicious of me bringing YOU a cake. Got any other ideas? 1.3175 0.04734 126 90 32 4
1991 Do you add the file before or after the flour? 1.3175 0.04734 126 90 32 4
1992 Well, I liked your killer salsa. 1.3175 0.05480 126 96 20 10
1993 I thought you said the butler did it. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1994 I told you the plan you cooked up wouldn't work. 1.3175 0.04734 126 90 32 4
1995 I love you, but I can't go that long without bread. 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
1996 Soylent green was never suppose to be a real food. 1.3175 0.05595 126 97 18 11
1997 So here's why I think your 'I am not a cook' defense backfired... 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
1998 I see they let you keep the hat. 1.3175 0.05121 126 93 26 7
1999 What do you mean The devils food cake made you do it? 1.3175 0.05243 126 94 24 8
2000 Seriously, did you even LOOK for the file in that cake? 1.3175 0.05363 126 95 22 9
2001 No, your lima bean preserves recipe is still safe. 1.3175 0.04313 126 87 38 1
2002 Are you still serving? 1.3171 0.05204 123 91 25 7
2003 Toque to me, honey 1.3167 0.05019 120 87 28 5
2004 I told you to stop stealing recipes! 1.3158 0.05160 133 100 24 9
2005 I can’t save your bacon this time. 1.3154 0.04638 130 93 33 4
2006 Your plan always felt a little half-baked. 1.3154 0.04638 130 93 33 4
2007 This time you really cooked the goose. 1.3150 0.05208 127 95 24 8
2008 No file and no cake. The reason you're in here is because of your half-baked ideas. 1.3150 0.05327 127 96 22 9
2009 Since you wont be out for 10 to 20, tell me where you hid the dough. 1.3150 0.05208 127 95 24 8
2010 Consider yourself lucky. For most people, having to cook your own last meal would be cruel and unusual punishment. 1.3150 0.05087 127 94 26 7
2011 At least you are no longer cooking the books. 1.3150 0.05208 127 95 24 8
2012 I've got it: Three cups flour, two eggs and one hack saw blade 1.3150 0.05327 127 96 22 9
2013 You may have gotten away with it if you only poached the books. 1.3150 0.04962 127 93 28 6
2014 I told you NOT to say "The salmon is to die for!" 1.3150 0.04962 127 93 28 6
2015 Yes, I'm sure. Our oven timer doesn't have a setting for "three to five years". 1.3150 0.04962 127 93 28 6
2016 No, no. Listen. I bake the hacksaw into YOUR cake. 1.3150 0.04962 127 93 28 6
2017 And you thought bragging about your “killer creme brûlée” was a good idea? 1.3150 0.04835 127 92 30 5
2018 Mississippi seems to regard nouvelle cuisine as a crime. 1.3150 0.04704 127 91 32 4
2019 They said you'd be here for 20 to life or until your skin looked golden brown. 1.3150 0.04835 127 92 30 5
2020 Now we know --- there is taste police. 1.3150 0.04962 127 93 28 6
2021 Turns out your cake really was to die for. 1.3150 0.05087 127 94 26 7
2022 Try and think of it as a "baker's dozen" years. 1.3150 0.05208 127 95 24 8
2023 Does the file come before or after the paprika? 1.3145 0.05039 124 91 27 6
2024 No, I can't bring you a file with a cake in it. 1.3145 0.05039 124 91 27 6
2025 ...because he LIKES it "well done" -- he thinks it's a compliment. And he's the PRESIDENT. That's why. 1.3145 0.05168 124 92 25 7
2026 I have a bun in the oven. It's yours. 1.3145 0.05168 124 92 25 7
2027 When I said to make a killer pasta, that's not what I meant. 1.3145 0.05416 124 94 21 9
2028 Oh, now you want me to bake a cake 1.3145 0.05039 124 91 27 6
2029 Take that hat off Walter, you aren't fooling anyone. They know exactly what kind of cook you are. 1.3145 0.05535 124 95 19 10
2030 The warden informed me you are going to do some serious thyme. 1.3145 0.04772 124 89 31 4
2031 Looks like they charged you with cooking the books. 1.3145 0.05535 124 95 19 10
2032 I told you not to beat the eggs. 1.3145 0.05416 124 94 21 9
2033 10-20 years? At 350 degrees? 1.3145 0.05039 124 91 27 6
2034 Stick a fork in it, you're done. 1.3145 0.05168 124 92 25 7
2035 I tried to tell you, but you refused to listen. 'It's a metaphor,' I said. 'Your Chocolate Mousse is to die for' is just a metaphor. 1.3145 0.05039 124 91 27 6
2036 But there is some good news. Hannibal Lecter has endorsed your cookbook. 1.3145 0.05416 124 94 21 9
2037 Michelin is taking away one of your stars. The pointy one you killed Charles with. 1.3145 0.04772 124 89 31 4
2038 I'll admit that the heist was a half-baked idea from the start, Gladys. 1.3145 0.05039 124 91 27 6
2039 I'm surviving, but I'm afraid I can't say the same for the sourdough starter. 1.3120 0.05257 125 94 23 8
2040 You're doing serious thyme in there. 1.3120 0.05005 125 92 27 6
2041 Turns out it was a typo. It was supposed to say kale. 1.3120 0.05257 125 94 23 8
2042 Try telling them you’re a chef instead of you knead the dough 1.3120 0.05133 125 93 25 7
2043 Darling, it’s pheasant under glass. Not peasant. 1.3115 0.05470 122 93 20 9
2044 Honey, just answer their question - where’s the beef? 1.3115 0.04668 122 87 32 3
2045 They’re now saying it had gluten AND peanuts in it. 1.3115 0.05592 122 94 18 10
2046 I told you not to let that Gordon Ramsay get under your skin! 1.3115 0.04668 122 87 32 3
2047 As your lawyer, I must warn you that no jury will believe your half-baked alibi and so you’re probably going to fry. 1.3115 0.05085 122 90 26 6
2048 Does the size of the file affect the temperature setting? 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
2049 So all of a sudden you CAN cook. 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
2050 Life at home is a nightmare! There are a dozen jars that I can't get opened. 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
2051 I can get you out in 27-32 minutes. 1.3115 0.05592 122 94 18 10
2052 I told you to keep your hands out of the dough! 1.3115 0.05592 122 94 18 10
2053 Again, I put the file in after the cake is baked--not into the batter? 1.3115 0.04668 122 87 32 3
2054 If I knew it would come to this, I never would have left that Yelp review. 1.3115 0.04520 122 86 34 2
2055 Beat, batter and a salt 1.3115 0.05712 122 95 16 11
2056 The parole board said you have to serve the full baker's dozen. 1.3115 0.04811 122 88 30 4
2057 I am so sorry to be the bearer of bad news but Pluto is no longer a planet 1.3115 0.05470 122 93 20 9
2058 So, where’s the dough ? 1.3115 0.05712 122 95 16 11
2059 If there is a next time, maybe you'll read the damn recipe. 1.3115 0.05592 122 94 18 10
2060 I was afraid this would happen. I knew you'd go stir crazy in there. 1.3115 0.04950 122 89 28 5
2061 I think your recipe for "Death By Chocolate" worked a little too well... 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
2062 Ok, I'll try—but you do know how hard it is to hide a chisel in a mille feuille. 1.3115 0.04950 122 89 28 5
2063 Sorry about my testimony, but would you remind me about the recipe for mushroom risotto? 1.3115 0.05712 122 95 16 11
2064 I hope you've learned, Maurice, that even if it's not a felony you can still be jailed for a torte. 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
2065 Oh Gordon, why did you have to do it? All he asked was for a well-done steak. 1.3115 0.05592 122 94 18 10
2066 When I asked you to make your killer T-bones, I wasn't being literal. 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
2067 I know you're innocent but you have to admit it's exciting to have a Michelin-starred prison in town now. 1.3115 0.05470 122 93 20 9
2068 Suggesting the Pinot Gris with the Beef Bourguignon was just criminal! 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
2069 Well, you did say you came up with a killer dish. 1.3115 0.05470 122 93 20 9
2070 It doesn't work if you smuggle a cake Out. 1.3115 0.05085 122 90 26 6
2071 And you thought you wouldn't get caught using cream of mushroom soup in your sauce? 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
2072 You went too far with the Sleeping with the fishes Menu! 1.3115 0.04811 122 88 30 4
2073 I know this is all my fault, and I'm so sorry you're in here, but to be fair the creme brulee really was 'so good it should be illegal.' 1.3115 0.05470 122 93 20 9
2074 Yes. I labeled the cyanide bottle as cinnamon. It's so much easier to spell! 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
2075 You told me it was oregano. 1.3115 0.05085 122 90 26 6
2076 What made you serve red wine with fish? 1.3115 0.05085 122 90 26 6
2077 I told you that the President would not eat crow. 1.3115 0.05470 122 93 20 9
2078 Bad news. The prosecutor has two witnesses who say it was not organic, free-range chicken. 1.3115 0.05592 122 94 18 10
2079 On the bright side, I get big laughs when I tell people you're in stir. 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
2080 The lobster is willing to testify that you put him the pot on purpose. 1.3115 0.04811 122 88 30 4
2081 Your lawyer says the idea for your appeal is half-baked. 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
2082 They found the Turducken 1.3115 0.05085 122 90 26 6
2083 It's better than making license plates. 1.3115 0.04950 122 89 28 5
2084 Well you did cook the books! 1.3115 0.05085 122 90 26 6
2085 This a half baked conversation. 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
2086 The man I married would have baked his own cake with a file in it. 1.3115 0.04950 122 89 28 5
2087 I buried the carrots. They'll never find them. 1.3115 0.05470 122 93 20 9
2088 Oh Francois, when Edna said your soufflé was to die for, she was speaking metaphorically. 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
2089 We were never after you, Jean Luc--it's the sommelier. Rat him out and you walk. And just so you don't end up like the busboy, we'll toss in witness protection. 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
2090 It seems that Mr. Trump did not like your 'Chef's Surprise' after all. 1.3115 0.05470 122 93 20 9
2091 They said your chocolate soufflé was so good it should be illegal. 1.3115 0.04811 122 88 30 4
2092 You can take the hat off. You're in the cooler now. 1.3115 0.05592 122 94 18 10
2093 Please tell me you didn’t serve Pinot Gris with beef. 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
2094 What kind of a cool villain name is "The Chef". It's no wonder the other villains make fun of you. 1.3115 0.05085 122 90 26 6
2095 "I said "knead the dough,' not 'need the dough.'' 1.3115 0.05592 122 94 18 10
2096 In retrospect, it probably wasn't such a good idea to spike the White House dinner lasagna with laxatives. 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
2097 So, are you somebody's sous chef in there? 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
2098 I just hope that you are not cooking up another half-baked idea! 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
2099 I'm sorry honey, but I'm afraid ICE just doesn't understand why you are running a 'French' restaurant. 1.3115 0.05216 122 91 24 7
2100 Why did you have to stir up so much trouble? 1.3115 0.04950 122 89 28 5
2101 Your lawyer called. He said your goose is cooked. 1.3115 0.05344 122 92 22 8
2102 Not one bad Yelp review since you’ve been assigned to making their “last meal.” 1.3109 0.04884 119 86 29 4
2103 The butler is saying you did it. 1.3089 0.05307 123 93 22 8
2104 You deserve to be in there considering how much truffle oil you used. 1.3089 0.05049 123 91 26 6
2105 I TOLD you your Death By Chocolate would get you in trouble. 1.3089 0.04916 123 90 28 5
2106 I mailed 168 get well cards for you. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2107 The judge will reduce the charge to assault and bakery. 1.3083 0.04704 120 86 31 3
2108 Once they found the proof in the pudding, your goose was cooked. 1.3083 0.05650 120 93 17 10
2109 You should have taken the gun and left the cannoli! 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2110 No, they ordered the fillet medium well, what choice did you have? 1.3083 0.05650 120 93 17 10
2111 I don't have enough dough to bail you out. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2112 Don't worry, we'll get you off for thyme served. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2113 Sorry, but apparently you were one toque over the line. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2114 You thought you were being ironic but the police took 'Death by Chocolate' as a confession. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2115 I see you're blending right in. 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
2116 It doesn’t matter if the cake is store bought or home made. You can use the file anyway 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2117 Your Coq Au Vin is to die for wasn’t meant literally 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2118 Bad news -- the prosecution's figured out you're really Col. Mustard. 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
2119 Apparently 'Death by Chocolate' is not what you thought it was, dear. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2120 Keep things under your hat is just an expression, dear. That’s how you got into this mess. 1.3083 0.04850 120 87 29 4
2121 It was the butler in the pantry with the pickle . . . 1.3083 0.05525 120 92 19 9
2122 You've been charged with cooking the books. 1.3083 0.04850 120 87 29 4
2123 I warned you to use your knife skills for good. 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
2124 Your cellmate wants you to cook a candlelight dinner for the two of you? 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2125 Next time, can you bring me my knives? 1.3083 0.04233 120 83 37 0
2126 We're pretty hungry. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2127 NOW you tell me you're the Hamburglar?! 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2128 The laws around gluten-free are very strict in California. You are looking at life. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2129 I told you not to make those “killer meatballs,” didn’t I? 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2130 Well, you did steal Grandma’s Secret recipe. 1.3083 0.05525 120 92 19 9
2131 Prison farm to table? Tres boho, retro and eco. But be smart -- if someone wants to use ketchup, let them. And don't get into an argument over appropriate beverage pairings. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2132 I told you this would happen if you keep cooking the books. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2133 Do I add the file before or after the eggs? 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2134 At least you didn't lie about being a killer cook. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2135 . . . and your agent says he'll put your Recipe for Success on the back burner till you get out. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2136 I'm leaving you for a guy with more dough. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2137 Think you could get a dozen napoleons past the guards for bridge club Wednesday? 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2138 The file is in the soufflé ... 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2139 Good news, your new cellmate is a butcher. No wait, he’s called The Butcher. 1.3083 0.04850 120 87 29 4
2140 What do you mean you put pineapple on the pizza? 1.3083 0.04850 120 87 29 4
2141 That's not what bun in the oven means. 1.3083 0.04850 120 87 29 4
2142 Now I get why you’re recommending takeout 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2143 So it seems the police didn't appreciate the humor in putting Exlax in the donut glaze. 1.3083 0.04704 120 86 31 3
2144 I'm really sorry I mixed up the coke and the flour. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2145 I'm placing my order for the spring of 2028 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2146 I'm assuming you want me to place an order to go. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2147 Where did you leave the good scissors? 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2148 The jury wants your recipe for quiche Lorraine. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2149 They said your soufflé was to die for 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2150 I guess I misunderstood when you told me you worked for the C.I.A. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2151 On the bright side, chances are you will get time off for gouda behavior. 1.3083 0.04850 120 87 29 4
2152 I think you and your tarts know why I'm here. 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
2153 Yes, I did turn off the oven. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2154 You said you wanted to bake cakes... you never said anything about people. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2155 Apparently Chef Boyardee has an airtight alibi. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2156 You're going to say that Mr Mustard did it with the meat cleaver 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2157 To die for is just a saying 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
2158 You shouldn’t have held the judge’s request for ketchup in contempt. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2159 Maybe you shouldn't have called it "Killer" chocolate cake. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2160 I am having doubts that you are really "away" at culinary school. 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
2161 They’re saying five years...three for good soufflé. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2162 If you say gluten free, it needs to be gluten free. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2163 I'll try, but baking's not my thing. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2164 I see your unsavory behavior finally caught up with you 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2165 You've been Chopped. 1.3083 0.05525 120 92 19 9
2166 I'am afraid your goose is cooked Dominic. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2167 Things are not looking good--the butcher and candlestick maker got knavery in the first degree. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2168 I can't find the carving knife. 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
2169 Well, they're saying that cooking a well-done steak should be a crime. 1.3083 0.04704 120 86 31 3
2170 I just don't have the bread to get you out.. 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
2171 Because to him I'm "the special," not "the usual"--that's why! 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2172 Bake you a cake with a file in it? I married you because I couldn't cook! 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
2173 I thought "sue chef" was just a joke. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2174 The lawyer says you have a good shot if we can prove you framed by the butcher and the candlestick maker. 1.3083 0.04850 120 87 29 4
2175 I told you not to engrave your initials on your knives. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2176 I warned you, Bill. You don't put ketchup on a Chicago dog. 1.3083 0.05525 120 92 19 9
2177 We were so proud--we thought they said you'd become a mafia chief. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2178 Give me your recipe for coq au vin or I tell the Warden what’s in the chili. 1.3083 0.05525 120 92 19 9
2179 First couple of tries the gun exploded in the oven inside the cake ..... 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2180 First the mushrooms, then the blowfish, and now this. 1.3083 0.04992 120 88 27 5
2181 The warden wants you to cater the hostage standoff. 1.3083 0.05650 120 93 17 10
2182 I met someone, Alec, and he's not like you. He's a patissier. A real one. I'm afraid this is au revoir. 1.3083 0.05397 120 91 21 8
2183 Think of it as poetic justice: serving time instead of thyme. 1.3083 0.05131 120 89 25 6
2184 I’m sorry sweetie. The police came by and took all the dough. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2185 It was in the pudding. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
2186 They say you're going to be in here for 45 minutes to life. 1.3077 0.04616 117 83 32 2
2187 Wait, was that "file a tort" or "file in a torte"? 1.3077 0.05355 117 88 22 7
2188 Is the money still in the hat? 1.3077 0.05073 117 86 26 5
2189 You're toast. They found the recipe for your Crime Brulee. 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
2190 OK. But how's the food? 1.3058 0.05228 121 91 23 7
2191 You knew what you were getting into when you put pineapple on that pizza. 1.3058 0.05358 121 92 21 8
2192 I don’t bake and I don’t file. 1.3058 0.05095 121 90 25 6
2193 It doesn't look good-- the autopsy confirms it was Death by Chocolate. 1.3058 0.04958 121 89 27 5
2194 I told you a baker's dozen is thirteen not eleven. 1.3058 0.04958 121 89 27 5
2195 Your lawyer is withdrawing from the case. It didn’t agree with him. 1.3058 0.04817 121 88 29 4
2196 Well, you should have known it was your own goose. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2197 Sorry, you're not getting a rise outta me anymore 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2198 If you give up the secret recipe they'll let you go! 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
2199 i'm telling you what I told the judge, the dish ran away with the spoon. 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2200 I just said I find it ironic ... from Iron Chef to a chef in irons! 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2201 Of course I can put a hacksaw in the cake, but I can't make any promises about cardamom and lavender 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2202 I'm really trying to get you out but they don't cut any slack for egg beaters. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2203 You made a killer quiche 1.3051 0.05036 118 87 26 5
2204 The Police Said it Was Death by Chocolate 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
2205 Well, now you know what the 'Chef's Surprise' is. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
2206 You say the jury misunderstood your use of the word "stollen"? 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2207 You always said your food” was to die for.” But I never took you literally! 1.3051 0.04890 118 86 28 4
2208 I’ve had your Bolognese, and no it’s not worthy of a conjugal visit. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2209 What, the butler did it? 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2210 So, it turns out that well done filet really IS a crime. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2211 They let you wear that in jail? 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2212 Well all I can say is this is your just deserts... 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2213 Darling, I'm afraid your goose is cooked. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2214 Did the jury really need to know that your croquembouche is to die for? 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2215 Honey, I found the file, but cannot find the recipe to the darned cake. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2216 The lawyer says your case is cut and dry, like your steak. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2217 So your saying you simply cut the cheese. 1.3051 0.05836 118 93 14 11
2218 I'd like a reservation for Friday in 5 to 10 years. 1.3051 0.05582 118 91 18 9
2219 This marriage is over. You just don't cut the mustard anymore. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
2220 Cheer up. Michelein ignores harassment charges. 1.3051 0.04890 118 86 28 4
2221 This time you really cooked your goose. 1.3051 0.05036 118 87 26 5
2222 Just admit it - that soufflé was a crime. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
2223 I told you there was a rat in your kitchen 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2224 I warned you, Andre, about one toque over the line. 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2225 When I said you could cook anything you liked, I didn't mean you could cook the books. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2226 Just tell them where the dough is and you’ll be free to go. 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2227 Perhaps you shouldn't have taken 'murder by chocolate' quite so seriously. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
2228 I can tell by the look in your eye, you're upset I forgot it was Role-Play Tuesday 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2229 I'm not allowed to give you any dough. 1.3051 0.05036 118 87 26 5
2230 No, "Some chef you are, you couldn't even cook the books." 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2231 They said your Mexican-Scandinavian fusion was a crime. 1.3051 0.05036 118 87 26 5
2232 Lately just a lot of cereal, why? 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2233 The Food Network called. They turned down your "Cooking Without Knives" show idea. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
2234 I can plead it down to lambslaughter. 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2235 Mother wss actually poisoned by the fish at Chez Henri's, but I thought it would hurt your feelings if you knew she ate there. . 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2236 They found out your Black French truffles were actually cheap Chinese fakes. 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2237 I wasn’t able to raise the dough to make bail. 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2238 Michelin just gave you 1 to 3 stars. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2239 Well, Mr. Meyer, it appears they thought your testimony was baloney. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
2240 I'll let you get back to serving thyme. 1.3051 0.05036 118 87 26 5
2241 Stealing is stealing and that was MY snickerdoodle recipe! 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2242 C’mon, Leo — where’d you stash the dough? 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2243 I don't think a sous-chef can really help you now. 1.3051 0.05036 118 87 26 5
2244 Why do you let the Girl Scouts get to you? 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2245 Dear, I don't think you were supposed to take literally that recipe for Death By Chocolate Cake. 1.3051 0.05036 118 87 26 5
2246 So, yes, it turns out that even suggesting humble pie for a White House dinner is against the law. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2247 I can't wait; I'm going to Blue Apron. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
2248 Mom calls you "breadloser" 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2249 Don't ask me for help. I'm not the one who kneaded the dough! 1.3051 0.05582 118 91 18 9
2250 So, what's cookin'? 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2251 Did you really think you were going to get away with beating those eggs and whipping that cream!? 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2252 When you said you would "cook his goose" I thought you meant, for dinner.... 1.3051 0.05036 118 87 26 5
2253 So dull they won't cut butter. Well, I guess there might be a reason for that! 1.3051 0.05036 118 87 26 5
2254 Table five is still waiting for their appetizer. 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2255 I warned you to stop beating the egg whites. 1.3051 0.05178 118 88 24 6
2256 Geez, Pierre, I told you using that online class to learn how to serve Blowfish wasn't the best idea. 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
2257 I told you the flambe defense doesn't work for warehouses. 1.3043 0.05265 115 86 23 6
2258 What can I tell you? This is California. 1.3043 0.05548 115 88 19 8
2259 Am I suppose to place an order or are you? 1.3043 0.04967 115 84 27 4
2260 Guess you over-cooked the books huh? 1.3033 0.05059 122 91 25 6
2261 If you had just admitted you didn't know what gluten was 1.3025 0.05000 119 88 26 5
2262 They indicted your ham sandwich. 1.3025 0.05277 119 90 22 7
2263 I told you that the TSA would have no sense of humor about anything you said was stöllen in your bag. 1.3025 0.05141 119 89 24 6
2264 If you give the judge the tiramisu recipe he'll let you out. 1.3025 0.05141 119 89 24 6
2265 So, how’s the food in there? 1.3025 0.05141 119 89 24 6
2266 What's the charge? Death by chocolate? 1.3025 0.05541 119 92 18 9
2267 "Your book is headed to Broadway: 'Salmonella the Musical'". 1.3025 0.05141 119 89 24 6
2268 You just had to have those Japanese knives. 1.3025 0.05541 119 92 18 9
2269 You took "Death By Chocolate" dessert too literally. 1.3025 0.05000 119 88 26 5
2270 You must let the prosecution grill you, or your goose is cooked. So simmer down, and we'll beat this case. 1.3025 0.05277 119 90 22 7
2271 Bad news--your lawyer says your cooked. 1.3025 0.05792 119 94 14 11
2272 The bad news is the lobster decided to bring charges. The good news is he was delicious. 1.3025 0.05411 119 91 20 8
2273 Well, what you did to the sauce was criminal! 1.3025 0.05277 119 90 22 7
2274 The judge said that what you did to that fish was a crime. 1.3025 0.05411 119 91 20 8
2275 I've got the dough. 1.3025 0.05141 119 89 24 6
2276 They say no parole until I get the beshemel sauce right 1.3025 0.05277 119 90 22 7
2277 I think you took that idea of 'a meal to die for' just a tad too literally. 1.3025 0.04856 119 87 28 4
2278 My mother told me to never trust a skinny chef, but I didn't listen. 1.3025 0.05411 119 91 20 8
2279 Steak well done? With ketchup? What were you thinking? 1.3025 0.05277 119 90 22 7
2280 So.. after you separate the yolks from the egg whites, what's next?.. 1.3025 0.05277 119 90 22 7
2281 I said, "Wear a disguise", not a costume! 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2282 Guess you won't short me on the canapés next time, will you, Pierre? 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2283 Did you substitute margarine again? 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2284 So what hair-brained scheme are you cooking up now? 1.3017 0.04617 116 83 31 2
2285 It's a fair deal, just tell me where you hid my mother's recipes, and I'll testify on your behalf. 1.3017 0.04777 116 84 29 3
2286 You had to brag about the "killer chocolate cake"! 1.3017 0.04617 116 83 31 2
2287 Is that a zucchini in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me? 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2288 They’re never going to believe the soufflé just fell. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2289 Food poisoning, again? 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2290 Unfortunately, no one wanted to actually die for your soufflé. 1.3017 0.04617 116 83 31 2
2291 When I said "They should arrest the chef for this" I was joking 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2292 OK, so you are a chef. But your profile says you're 6'3" and slim. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2293 I warned you that cooking with all that butter was a death sentence 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2294 Well I miss you. I miss your smile, but mostly I miss your pecan pie. 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2295 Who knew that the statement “he makes a killer meatloaf” could have legal implications? 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2296 Your lawyer said you may get a reduced sentence to a bakers dozen. 1.3017 0.05640 116 90 17 9
2297 I told you putting mayonnaise on kale is criminal. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2298 That was your secret ingredient? 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2299 #thymesup 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2300 So there really were too many cooks IN the soup? 1.3017 0.05640 116 90 17 9
2301 When I said your idea to rob a bank was half-baked, it wasn't meant as a compliment. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2302 No, we don't have enough dough to make bail. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2303 They found your finger prints on the knife, and the cutting board, the whisk, and the saucepan. 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2304 Well, so much for your killer menu! 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2305 I’m happy to bake a file into the cake, but I don’t see the point of the bittersweet chocolate ganache. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2306 Don't worry, dear. The proof is in the pudding. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2307 Sorry honey. When I said you were a killer chef, they took me literally. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2308 Your lawyer doesn't think a jury will agree that it was a justifiable homicide because the victim asked for ketchup. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2309 Well I WARNED you that it's a crime to put ketchup on spaghetti. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2310 Sure, I kneaded the dough, but that does not prove anything. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2311 Can you request cage-free? 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2312 Really? You hid it in pudding? 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2313 "Just keep your head down, and do your thyme". 1.3017 0.04777 116 84 29 3
2314 I warned you not to serve Death by Chocolate. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2315 Sorry Bob - I have another bun in the oven 1.3017 0.04777 116 84 29 3
2316 I knew your creme brûlée would get you into trouble one day. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2317 I told you not to try and cook the books! 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2318 Your killer souffle' got you into trouble this time. 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2319 Wait till I buy the file. Then you can tell me how to bake a cake. 1.3017 0.04777 116 84 29 3
2320 The Cornish Game Hens have filed #MeToo charges. 1.3017 0.05640 116 90 17 9
2321 They say the soup was to die for, but that you murdered the steak. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2322 I said, “ ‘Please torch the Creme Brûlée’ not my mother.” 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2323 My son asked me to tell you that he really prefers his sandwiches lightly toasted with the crust trimmed off. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2324 Don't lie to me Herbert, I know you are cooking up something. 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2325 Puhleez! If you knew I were coming you'd have baked a cake? 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2326 You're a chef, Charlie. You cook the food not the books. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2327 They say you've been charged for a salt and battering 1.3017 0.05506 116 89 19 8
2328 I hid the knives like you asked. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2329 I told you it wasn't oregano,but you wouldn't listen. 1.3017 0.04777 116 84 29 3
2330 I couldn't raise the dough to bail you out. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2331 It's just the warden's idea of fun when you're in for 'Cooking the Books' 1.3017 0.05506 116 89 19 8
2332 Your lawyer wants you to plea Nolo Consomme'. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2333 It wasn't what I had in mind when I asked you to make a killer dessert! 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2334 Your lawyer says you're facing hard thyme. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2335 I told you not to cook the books . . . 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2336 Howard, you shouldn't get so upset when your soufflé doesn't rise. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2337 They say your goose is cooked. 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2338 When the getaway car was late, I knew we were toast. 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2339 On the bright side, your street cred's now up there with Bourdain. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2340 Did you explain that you’re a cook, not a crook? 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2341 But making your soufflé fall was still no reason to stab him. 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2342 I guess you were right when you said the heist would be a cake walk. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2343 If you return the star you'll get parole. Think of our children. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2344 Why do you need a saw to cut a cake? 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2345 The lawyer told me that you've cooked your goose. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2346 I told you that your cooking was a federal offense! 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2347 They found the dough you stole! 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2348 They confiscated the immersion blender, but they didn't find the whisk. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2349 Everyone knew he was dirty! You should never have admitted you knew the Muffin Man. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2350 I warned you about making the devil's food cake. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2351 Meat IS murder... 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2352 You were incarcerated for stealing the dough? 1.3017 0.05640 116 90 17 9
2353 I'm sorry Harold, that soufflé collapsed a long time ago. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2354 No, the food critic's review wasn't the kindest, but I guess you can chalk that up to the stomach pump thing. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2355 I told you here in Amerika you can’t poison your critics. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2356 In America, you serve the salad before the entrée. 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2357 ...Plus, they're also going to sous you. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2358 Did you tell them it was Colonel Mustard in the Library with the Candle Stick? 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2359 The cake wasn't moist enough to insert the file. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2360 It's spelled B-O-M-B-E 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2361 Cancel my order. I can't wait anymore. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2362 I just couldn't wait any longer Harry. You know how I am. I need someone who can peel my potatoes, steam my clams and warm my cockles. 1.3017 0.04777 116 84 29 3
2363 We're running out of dough, Fred ! 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2364 Our lawyer says you’re looking at eight to ten at four hundred degrees. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2365 Where did you hide the file-in-the-cake recipe? 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2366 I just want you to know, it was the best foie gras I ever had. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2367 Don't worry, I've scheduled an appearance for you in food court next week. 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2368 I thought your cooking was only sinful. 1.3017 0.04777 116 84 29 3
2369 Based on what your attorney is telling me, they’re definitely going to sous you. 1.3017 0.04777 116 84 29 3
2370 This could all be over if you would just tell them your secret blend of herbs and spices. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2371 So, how's the Iron Bars Chef doing? 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2372 Good News. Guinness confirms you're the only one with four stars and four years. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2373 All anyone wants is avocado toast. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2374 And........table six said the fish was overcooked 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2375 Sorry Fred, I've moved on to the Candlestick maker. 1.3017 0.05506 116 89 19 8
2376 I am sorry my love, but there is no greater crime than impersonating a chef in France. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2377 I'm leaving you for another flan. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2378 The kids won't eat anything that I make. 1.3017 0.04931 116 85 27 4
2379 Maybe next time don't suggest to the president that he should eat something other than garbage? 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2380 When the food critics said that your cooking was a crime, I thought they were just being sarcastic! 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2381 I warned you pineapple doesn't go on pizza 1.3017 0.05506 116 89 19 8
2382 You left a bun in the oven... 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2383 All this for beating an egg? 1.3017 0.05640 116 90 17 9
2384 What...you want me to bake a file in a lemon souffle with with orange zest? 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2385 From where I sit, Pierre, you're one toque over the line. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2386 I can't believe they put you on chef's row. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2387 I'm sure an edgy new restaurant would have interest in hiring a chef just released from the maximum security prison 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2388 I'm pregnant with your Julia child. 1.3017 0.05506 116 89 19 8
2389 Of course he died. But he said the sauce was delicious. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2390 Unfortunately, your food was to die __of. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2391 I told you all the food shows are taking recipes more seriously 1.3017 0.04777 116 84 29 3
2392 You're the pastry chef, tell them where you hid the dough. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2393 I swear I didn't cook the books! 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2394 I assumed 'sinful chocolate mousse' was a figure of speech. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2395 It’s also the last meal you’ll ever have to worry about. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2396 No more of your half baked excuses! 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2397 Sure, I brought the knife. I just assumed you’d bake the cake. 1.3017 0.05226 116 87 23 6
2398 Sorry, but I've taken up with nouvelle cuisine. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2399 But you did murder the soufflé. 1.3017 0.05772 116 91 15 10
2400 It's not about the cake; it's about the file. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2401 They don't even let you use creme fraiche? The inhumanity! 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2402 No, I can’t wait for you. Not this time. Three to five years without a decent meal is more than I can bear. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2403 What's for dinner? 1.3017 0.05506 116 89 19 8
2404 I'm leaving you for a dishwasher. He makes me happy. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2405 Both the Butcher and the Candlestick maker got 20 years to life. 1.3017 0.05506 116 89 19 8
2406 "Told you your cherry cheesecake was "criminally delicious". 1.3017 0.04452 116 82 33 1
2407 I'm sorry. I'm just a passionate Yelper. 1.3017 0.05368 116 88 21 7
2408 Turns out that it is a federal crime to put de lime in de coconut. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
2409 We're trying to run things without you, but the sous chef doesn't know where you hid the dough. 1.3008 0.05155 123 93 23 7
2410 Chocolate layers, buttercream icing, and don't forget the cordless angle grinder. 1.3000 0.05239 120 91 22 7
2411 So one more time: do I add the eggs before or after the milk? 1.3000 0.04364 120 85 34 1
2412 Bail was set at 12 hundred, so I gave them 13. 1.3000 0.05371 120 92 20 8
2413 Anthony, you're right, Bobby Flay probably hasn't cooked mash potatoes for 300 men... 1.3000 0.05500 120 93 18 9
2414 I'll give you the file, but you'll need to bake the cake. 1.2991 0.04896 117 86 27 4
2415 A fallen souffle carries a mandatory minimum sentence of 48 months. But I am more concerned with the enhancements for the ongoing overuse of Brussels sprouts and kale. 1.2991 0.05044 117 87 25 5
2416 Well Henry, as you always said, your veal was to die for. 1.2991 0.05188 117 88 23 6
2417 The lawyer says you could get 10 years on a Food Pyramid scheme conviction. 1.2991 0.05044 117 87 25 5
2418 The prosecutor wants 5 years at 350 degrees. 1.2991 0.05465 117 90 19 8
2419 I've got a file, but you'll need to give me the recipe for a cake. 1.2991 0.05328 117 89 21 7
2420 You fool! I told you that a dozen chili peppers would kill any one. 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2421 I think there were too many blackbirds on the jury 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2422 So all you said was that you're going to beat some eggs? 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2423 Are we going to have a conjugal or culinary visit? 1.2982 0.04814 114 83 28 3
2424 “That’s not what they meant by ‘cook the books.’ 1.2982 0.05563 114 88 18 8
2425 You and I might not think planked salmon minus the pinot noir is a crime, but society does. 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2426 Either you're responsible for serving 5 to 10 or for 5 to 10 servings. 1.2982 0.04650 114 82 30 2
2427 Well, hopefully, the next time somebody tells you they'd kill for a perfect filet mignon, you'll ignore them! 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2428 Turns out it really is 10 to 15 for killer Lasagna 1.2982 0.04973 114 84 26 4
2429 Ketchup on a Chicago Hot Dog? Really? 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2430 Mr. Battaglia can't come to the phone right now... but would you like to make a reservation? 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2431 It's one thing to cook the books, Lou, but most people would've skipped the flambéeing. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2432 One Big Mac and two large fries 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2433 Your attorney called. He said to tell you that your goose is cooked. 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2434 They think you cooked the books but I told them you only do flambé. 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2435 Bad need. The butcher and the candlestick maker cut a deal to testify against you. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2436 And you felt that it wasn't constructive criticism. 1.2982 0.04973 114 84 26 4
2437 Bugsy sez bustin' you out will be a piece of cake--if you have the dough. 1.2982 0.05563 114 88 18 8
2438 The jury was unanimous, it was a meal to die for. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2439 Well, meat is murder. 1.2982 0.05835 114 90 14 10
2440 They keep asking if I know where you kept the dough 1.2982 0.05700 114 89 16 9
2441 But all he wanted to do was order something off the menu. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2442 The free-range chickens are joining the march for your cause 1.2982 0.04650 114 82 30 2
2443 The restaurant's back in business, Glen--but they removed your "Grilled Whole Blowfish" from the seafood menu. ' special. 1.2982 0.04973 114 84 26 4
2444 I'm going to level with you, pairing fish with a Bordeaux isn't going to fly with a jury of your peers. 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2445 How were your tater tots today? 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2446 At least you are not guilty of fast food. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2447 Your lawyer's demanding another dozen chocolate macarons. 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2448 You should have thought twice before you beat that egg. 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2449 The jury voted 13-0 to convict, it was a baker’s dozen. 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2450 Do you have the time to make a Risotto? 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2451 I warned you about that pairing. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2452 I’m sorry Pierre, but I have to agree. That Creme Brûlée was criminal. 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2453 They’re offering a plea deal... And we’re out of shallots. 1.2982 0.04973 114 84 26 4
2454 You're charged with rigging the pastry challenge, so just plead down to simple baking and entering. 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2455 I've heard orange chiffon is the new black forest. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2456 Maybe the candlestick maker will understand me. 1.2982 0.05700 114 89 16 9
2457 Hand over that muffin recipe and I'll tell them I saw nothing. 1.2982 0.04814 114 83 28 3
2458 Eventually, they'll figure out it was the butler. 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2459 They'll drop the charges... If you admit , that there was a fly in the soup. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2460 I can't bail you out. You used up all the dough. 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2461 Whose recipe did you steal? Mrs.Trumps? 1.2982 0.05835 114 90 14 10
2462 But all you said was that eating with hands at the White House dinner table is uncouth. 1.2982 0.05563 114 88 18 8
2463 The judge says it's a baker's dozen. 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2464 Canned parmesan is a crime, but you shouldn't have hit him over the head with it. 1.2982 0.04973 114 84 26 4
2465 What did you expect to happen for cooking the books? 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2466 How long do I leave it in for? 1.2982 0.05563 114 88 18 8
2467 ZOf course they wanted you back! Have you seen what they’ve been eating since you paroled? 1.2982 0.04973 114 84 26 4
2468 I'm sorry it took so long for me to visit. I-I-I'm just not stroganoff to see you like this. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2469 Another sous chef was shanked today 1.2982 0.04480 114 81 32 1
2470 Now will you stop calling yourself cake boss? 1.2982 0.04814 114 83 28 3
2471 I don't think you get it. I bring the cake. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2472 I told you not to forage for mushrooms for your new omlette recipe. 1.2982 0.05700 114 89 16 9
2473 I agree that the sole was overcooked, but these Gordon Ramsay shows are really getting out of hand. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2474 Well, at least it's the Cooks County Jail. 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2475 I'd send you a cake with a file inside, but you'd probably just criticize the bake. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2476 So, did you turn the stove off? 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2477 They got me on a salt and batter possession. 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
2478 'Bad news Henry, they found your missing wife's DNA in the bone broth." 1.2982 0.05563 114 88 18 8
2479 No, you’re not coming out until you’re brown and crusty. 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2480 Just tell me you didn't know the prime rib was underaged? 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
2481 Maybe they'll reduce your sentence for good thyme. 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
2482 No, I’m not surprised that the cookbook section of the library is lacking. 1.2973 0.04719 111 80 29 2
2483 ''Don't worry... I heard they always respect the guy with the knife here.'' 1.2973 0.04719 111 80 29 2
2484 I warned you, if you do the crime you do the thyme. 1.2966 0.05424 118 91 19 8
2485 Should have let them have it well done Frank 1.2957 0.05089 115 86 24 5
2486 I thought your 'lamb shank redemption' lacked acidity. 1.2957 0.05380 115 88 20 7
2487 No, I'm sorry, we don't deliver. 1.2957 0.05089 115 86 24 5
2488 Well, you didn't have to stab the judges. 1.2957 0.05089 115 86 24 5
2489 I spoke to our lawyer. Apparently your cooking was in fact bad enough to be criminal. 1.2957 0.05520 115 89 18 8
2490 He’s saying that you pushed him off the wall after threatening to beat him and eleven of his friends. 1.2957 0.05657 115 90 16 9
2491 You were warned. White wine with seafood. 1.2957 0.05236 115 87 22 6
2492 I told you your Cross Buns were hot. 1.2957 0.05520 115 89 18 8
2493 That’s 3 cups of flour, 1 cup of sugar, and a hand file at 350 for 30 minutes. Was it baking powder or baking soda? 1.2957 0.05380 115 88 20 7
2494 They're charging you with salted and buttery. 1.2957 0.05236 115 87 22 6
2495 Do they at least pair the meatloaf with a nice Merlot? 1.2957 0.05236 115 87 22 6
2496 Didn't you know that Martha Stewart has a no tolerance policy about stealing her cookie recipes? 1.2957 0.04937 115 85 26 4
2497 The file made it in just fine. I'm upset because the cake was dry. 1.2957 0.05236 115 87 22 6
2498 I warned you about serving him that dish you always say is “to die for!” 1.2957 0.05236 115 87 22 6
2499 I told you cannabis soup would get you in trouble. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2500 When I said no peanuts, I meant no peanuts. 1.2946 0.04684 112 81 29 2
2501 I guess, Raul, that you could say that your appeal is on the backburner . . . 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2502 Now what did you cook up? 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
2503 I had hoped they would replace that ridiculous outfit with an orange jumpsuit. 1.2946 0.05016 112 83 25 4
2504 "So instead of a file in a cake, you want a whisk"? 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2505 Well, at least your hat is holding up nicely. 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2506 I brought you the shank like you asked. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2507 The Michelin people say this is a deal breaker. 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
2508 She said your goose was cooked. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2509 Do I add the file before or after I put the cake in the oven? 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2510 Actually, it was a banker’s dozen. 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2511 I guess your goose is cooked 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
2512 Your casserole hearing will be at 3:50 for about 20 minutes. 1.2946 0.05016 112 83 25 4
2513 Cookie jar again? 1.2946 0.05016 112 83 25 4
2514 I knew you seemed suspicious, just from all of the dough you were making. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2515 Well, can you ask Martha for her meringue recipe? 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2516 There was a typo...they think you’re the coke boss. 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
2517 I told you not to take Death By Chocolate literally. 1.2946 0.05621 112 87 17 8
2518 I didn't literally mean death by chocolate 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
2519 Yes, I did cook the books. 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2520 I’m sorry, but Chef Boyardee’s always been there for me. 1.2946 0.05016 112 83 25 4
2521 I warned you that your soufflé was a killer! 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
2522 They froze everything. 1.2946 0.05016 112 83 25 4
2523 They got me in here on a phony farm-to-table rap. 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2524 The food critic agreed not to press charges, but then added that he found your left hook “pedestrian.” 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2525 Whatever you do, don't be the little spoon. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2526 The butcher and the candlestick maker are wanting to cut ties 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2527 I've got the dough. 1.2946 0.05621 112 87 17 8
2528 For goodness sakes, so the customer liked ketchup on his steak!! 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2529 Medium, extra cheese, sausage and olives. I'll pick it up in 3 to 5 years. 1.2946 0.05016 112 83 25 4
2530 I'm sorry Elliot, you've been chopped. 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
2531 I need your recipe for cake with a file in it. 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2532 I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but your goose, as they say, is cooked. 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2533 Want to try Take Out? 1.2946 0.05762 112 88 15 9
2534 Don't worry. I'm cooking up a defense. 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
2535 Your meatloaf was criminal... 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
2536 I've been eating at McDonalds. 1.2946 0.05016 112 83 25 4
2537 Unfortunately, "Death by Chocolate" won't hold water as a homicide defense. 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
2538 Just filet the biggest guy in the lunch line and you'll be fine. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2539 Was that two tablespoons of shallots? 1.2946 0.05016 112 83 25 4
2540 This is New York. They don't need a 'last meals' chef. 1.2946 0.05621 112 87 17 8
2541 I told you they wouldn’t believe, “I am not a cook.” 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2542 I told him not to cook the books. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2543 How do you feel about a bun in the oven? 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2544 Even if it is an upscale Cafe in Midtown, letting a souffle fall should be at most a misdemeanor and not a felony. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
2545 They wouldn't let me bring in the cake. 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
2546 The real crime was your souffle 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
2547 Honey, I’m thrilled you’ve improved the prison’s tater tot recipe. I really am. But can we focus on the real issue here? 1.2920 0.04817 113 83 27 3
2548 Your ex's attorney wants to know where you hid the dough. 1.2920 0.05286 113 86 21 6
2549 Honey, I'm telling you I swear it was oregano. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2550 Remind the butcher and candlestick maker that their wives will be up next week. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2551 Hi. I brought you some flours. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2552 Let’s face it, honey, your popovers are indefensible. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2553 If this isn’t working for you, we can still try the cowboy-themed prison. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2554 The recipe said beat lightly, not lightly beat your wife. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2555 Did you try explaining to them that it was just flour? 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
2556 Why would I bring you a cake? 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2557 No, Soylent Green was not a documentary or a sustainable business plan 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2558 Between the Keebler Elves and the Pillsbury Dough Boy, I couldn't take any more. I just snapped. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2559 Well, now you know what I meant when I called to say that you goose is cooked. 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
2560 At least you got that Michelin Star 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2561 They're reducing your sauce. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2562 I told you this 'baker's dozen' racket was nothing but a Ponzi scheme. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2563 Got any ideas for dinner? 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2564 I think that oregano you used in the spaghetti sauce was actually Timmy's marijuana stash. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2565 But your angel food cake recipe said nothing about a file. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2566 It's probably not a good time to tell you this, but I'm leaving you for the Candlestick Maker. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2567 I'll wait. I don't give a crêpe. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2568 Clarisse, "Jean Claude, the candlestick maker has turned State's evidence." 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2569 I still can't believe you served a protein with two starches. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2570 Don't take the rap for the butcher and the candlestick maker. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2571 At least now we get to see more of each other. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2572 Everything's alright. The detectives loved the meat pies. See, no evidence... 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
2573 Was it the roadkill recipe? 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2574 They say you murdered the coq au vin. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2575 So to review: you bake the cake, and I'll bring the knife to hide in it. 1.2909 0.04718 110 80 28 2
2576 How's the food in there? 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
2577 Did someone ask for well-done again? 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2578 I guess your Pumpkin Surprise Treats didn't go over too well at the police picnic. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2579 I don't think dressing like a chef will get you a set of knives. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2580 Sorry chef, but you deserve this. I clearly specified 'over easy'. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2581 You idiot! I told you to add turmeric not arsenic! 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2582 I don’t think you can get time off for good baking. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2583 Does it really matter what type of cake it is? 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2584 Didn’t I tell you not to take the dough. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2585 I’m sorry, but I found a new baker while you were doughing thyme. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2586 The coroners report came back: Death by chocolate. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2587 why is it everyone but you knew the president thought, 'organic' & 'poisonous' were synonymous? 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
2588 You did cook the books, didn't you? 1.2909 0.04538 110 79 30 1
2589 If only you didn't take a request for a killer recipe so literally... 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2590 Unfortunately for you, a guilty plea gets you a baker's dozen. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2591 The judge said your Coquilles St.- Jacques is indefensible. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2592 I told you overcooking that coq au vin was practically criminal. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2593 Then who did steal the cookies from the cookie jar ? 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2594 So they really did die for your meringues? 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2595 The sous chefs are starting to forget what you look like. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2596 You got a cruel sentence ... a baker's dozen. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2597 OK, so let me make sure I have that cake recipe memorized--two cups of flour, three eggs, a teaspoon of vanilla, one file . . . 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
2598 If only you hadn't cooked the books! 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2599 Yes, your salmon was that bad! 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2600 Well, with you gone the food is terrible out here too. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2601 I understand you needed bread but you should never have stolen that dough 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2602 I'll serve a baker's dozen for cooking the books. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2603 Your lawyer said the D.A. is not finished grilling you. 1.2909 0.04718 110 80 28 2
2604 Serves you right for baking cupcakes while I was on a diet. 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
2605 You didn't realize serving non-organic toothpicks is a felony in San Francisco? 1.2909 0.05826 110 87 14 9
2606 They might shorten your time if you can get the Michelin rating up. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2607 I see Bubba has made you his baker. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2608 I think I left the oven on. 1.2909 0.05967 110 88 12 10
2609 I assume you don't deliver. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2610 I can't raise the dough. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2611 I told you to always wash your hands before returning to work! 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2612 So your souffle dropped at Mar-A-Lago. Is that a crime? 1.2909 0.05826 110 87 14 9
2613 Well, you know the saying, "One man's fish is another man's poison." 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2614 I'm living with your mom now. She's a better cook. 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
2615 I don't think that's what they had in mind when they said the cheesecake was to die for. 1.2909 0.04538 110 79 30 1
2616 I told you not to beat Bobby Flay. 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
2617 Before he died Bob said there just wasn’t enough thyme. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2618 So you made one little mistake with my husband, rest his soul, I still adore your cooking. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2619 Stealing kitchen equipment.......now do you think it was a whisk worth taking? 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2620 The judge hearing your case is a lobster. 1.2909 0.05967 110 88 12 10
2621 You took "Death by Chocolate" too literally. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2622 They say you're withholding information on why the dish ran away with the spoon... 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2623 I always suggested you WRITE cookbooks, not COOK books! 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2624 Where did you stash the dough? 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2625 The butcher, the baker, and the candle stick maker all turned State's evidence. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2626 Don't you think a file in the cake is a bit obvious? 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2627 Look on the bright side. The judge only gave you a baker’s dozen. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2628 I told you not to steal my mother’s cookie recipe! 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2629 I told you the wild mushrooms would get you in trouble. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2630 I hear with good behavior twenty five years can be reduced to a baker's dozen 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
2631 The lawyer says you’re looking at a dozen to life. 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
2632 Sorry I havent been here to visit since the trial but could you give me your recipe for beef bourguignon. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2633 I'm think your goose is cooked. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2634 Yes, they're going to grill you but it's not what you think! 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2635 Anybody can make bagels. Just tell them the damned recipe. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2636 I'm guessing a file baked into a gateau au chocolat fondant is going to raise suspicion. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2637 The butcher and the candlestick guy say hi. 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
2638 Oh, honey, they say your goose is cooked. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2639 You know he asked for al dente. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2640 The coroner's report said it was death by chocolate. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2641 What were you thinking putting Death by Chocolate on the menu? 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
2642 I brought flour, sugar, eggs, butter and a file -- you'll have to do the rest. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2643 How many times have I warned you about cooking the books? 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2644 You're cooked. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2645 It has nothing to do with you being in jail. I'm... gluten-intolerant. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2646 If it's a quarter teaspoon of vanilla for one muffin, just multiply that nine thousand inmates. 1.2909 0.05826 110 87 14 9
2647 My advice? Find the toughest guy in there and either kick his ass or become his sous chef. 1.2909 0.04718 110 80 28 2
2648 I always knew you'd step up from flipping burgers. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2649 The news that I'm deserting you must seem bittersweet. 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
2650 I told you it was to die for. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2651 Whats cooking? 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2652 I don't believe you're a criminal but your cooking certainly is. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2653 You’re French toast! 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2654 I’m afraid your being charged as the ‘chef conspirator’. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2655 I guess the souffle really was to die for. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2656 It worked for Martha so I thought I would give it a try. 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
2657 You have to admit, that souffle was a crime. 1.2909 0.04718 110 80 28 2
2658 I may have misunderstood when you kept referring to the cross buns as "hot." 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2659 I gave you a file. Can’t you make your own cake? 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2660 Bugsy says bake your own cake. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2661 It really was death by chocolate! 1.2909 0.05967 110 88 12 10
2662 I think the Hannibal Lecter Goulash was a dead giveaway. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2663 Your final appeal, like your baklava, was "to die for". 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
2664 But they said they wanted a meal to die for. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2665 You knew pairing that cabernet with caviar was criminal. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2666 There’s no way you’re getting out. The proof was in the pudding. 1.2909 0.05826 110 87 14 9
2667 They said they wanted a patsy Frank not a pastry 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2668 Calling catfish Tennessee Tuna? What did you think would happen? 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2669 Didn't I always say your half-baked ideas would come to no good? 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
2670 I meant that we should complain to the neighborhood association or something--not actually skewer them. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2671 And, yes. I checked with the Butchet and the Candlestick-Maker, again. They refuse to back up your silly alibi. 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
2672 They said they ran out of orange jumpsuits. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2673 I don't see how a bundt cake with vanilla glaze is relevant to the hacksaw. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2674 The jury just didn't like the way your lawyer plated you. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2675 Who knew when the reporter said the dinner was "so bad it should be illegal" was literal 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2676 'I realize it was a negative Yelp review, but you didn't have to kill him." 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
2677 You KNOW the judges don't like truffle oil! 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2678 Your food was to die for! 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2679 They said you cooked the books, but I don't believe it. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2680 Your defense is asking for medium rare but the prosecutors want well-done. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2681 I’m seeing a new saucier. He’s saucier. 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
2682 Today's special is the Lambshank Redemption, served al catraz, and that was sourced locally at the Green Mile. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2683 You just had to tell them the soup was vegan. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2684 No. They still won't let you have your knives. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2685 You don’t understand—they won’t even supply parsley for garnishing in here! 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2686 I've been seeing the muffin man that lives on Drury Lane. 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
2687 My lawyer says the "Death by Chocolate" defense won't fly. 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
2688 I told you not serve the blowfish 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
2689 I didn't think it was that bad. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
2690 Sorry, but when I'm with the candlestick maker, all the ingredients come together. 1.2906 0.05159 117 89 22 6
2691 Stealing my gravy recipe is an act to roux. 1.2895 0.05246 114 87 21 6
2692 Oh dear, are you getting enough to cook? 1.2895 0.05940 114 92 11 11
2693 I told you not to mess with the Secret Sauce. 1.2893 0.05306 121 94 19 8
2694 I warned you that butter substitutes are a crime. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
2695 We don’t have the dough for bail. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
2696 I'm sorry, your appeal was denied. You asked for the wrong kind of turnover. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
2697 You didn't say WHAT kind of mushroom! 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
2698 "Cooking the Books"as the house special? Really? 1.2870 0.05271 108