Contest #602


Cartoon

602


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Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 The operation went well—you’re one tough cookie. 2.0291 0.01583 2405 690 955 760
1 We ran a few tests and all the toothpicks came back clean 2.0094 0.01133 4982 1570 1795 1617
2 In our opinion, you won't make it past the holidays. 2.0057 0.02069 1403 417 561 425
3 Have you tried icing it? 1.9982 0.01200 4390 1391 1616 1383
4 I'm afraid the confection has spread. 1.9874 0.01271 3813 1198 1465 1150
5 It's not a ginger fracture. It's worse. It's a ginger snap. 1.9860 0.01474 2854 905 1084 865
6 I'm not going to sugarcoat this. 1.9839 0.01051 5399 1653 2180 1566
7 I'm afraid, sir, since you were on the floor for more than five seconds, there's nothing we can do for you. 1.9747 0.01134 5171 1786 1730 1655
8 He's only known to us as John Dough. 1.9717 0.01107 5196 1730 1883 1583
9 Good news: it's just a yeast infection. 1.9695 0.01719 2129 703 788 638
10 The results of your biopsy were delicious. 1.9647 0.01377 3423 1173 1198 1052
11 We have good news and bad news: You'll be home for Christmas. 1.9620 0.01281 3871 1306 1406 1159
12 Eyes still look glazed. 1.9616 0.01254 3620 1103 1553 964
13 You're fine, but they couldn't save the house. 1.9573 0.01525 2647 873 1014 760
14 I’m afraid that IS the way it crumbles, sir. 1.9456 0.01278 3711 1231 1451 1029
15 Time to meet your baker. 1.9398 0.01132 5065 1806 1758 1501
16 You’re lucky. They usually bite the head off first. 1.9373 0.01607 2504 893 875 736
17 Your color is good, but your sugar level is high. 1.9373 0.02170 1275 425 505 345
18 Were you battered as a child? 1.9359 0.01570 2652 957 908 787
19 So the good news is we finally got your temperature down from 350 degrees. 1.9357 0.01504 2568 833 1067 668
20 Go home. Rest. Put some icing on it. 1.9272 0.01163 4410 1488 1755 1167
21 Have you tried icing it? 1.9252 0.01578 2488 870 934 684
22 I'm here to take a tissue sample...actually, we'd all like samples. 1.9198 0.01580 2455 858 936 661
23 Yes, thanks to a generous raisin donor, you can see again. 1.9158 0.01295 3694 1313 1379 1002
24 Good news. The Pillsbury Dough Boy is a match. 1.9147 0.01343 3412 1207 1289 916
25 The fact that you survived the holidays is a good sign 1.9139 0.01173 4054 1320 1763 971
26 We'd like to keep you here for further tasting. 1.9055 0.01123 4796 1698 1853 1245
27 Look, there's just no way to sugar-coat this... 1.8969 0.01201 4140 1471 1625 1044
28 You are a lucky man, considering that you had a temperature of 350 degrees for eight to ten minutes. 1.8948 0.01338 3403 1234 1293 876
29 It's obviously gingervitis. 1.8764 0.01683 2177 822 802 553
30 Unfortunately, all of our wheelchairs are in use. We do have a dessert cart. 1.8748 0.01384 3266 1252 1171 843
31 I'm afraid he's going to die of consumption. 1.8737 0.01432 3261 1322 1029 910
32 In case the surgery goes south, we're hoping that you consent to donating your body to the nurses break room. 1.8716 0.01800 1900 722 700 478
33 The procedure will cost you an arm and a leg. 1.8683 0.01668 2171 817 823 531
34 Prepare to meet your baker. 1.8602 0.01747 2096 837 715 544
35 Sir, you are one tough cookie. 1.8583 0.01312 3466 1314 1329 823
36 It's a miracle that you survived. Your house was totally devoured. 1.8412 0.01299 3603 1426 1323 854
37 We're discharging you. I suggest that you run, run, as fast as you can. 1.8404 0.01838 1823 730 654 439
38 Your cholesterol and sugar levels are a little high, but you color's good and you smell delicious. 1.8346 0.01330 3435 1375 1253 807
39 Your sugar is too high, your fats are elevated, and , quite frankly, you’re a day too old. 1.8265 0.01475 2790 1130 1014 646
40 The good news is we have a cure. The bad news is it'll cost you an arm and a leg. 1.8256 0.01420 2907 1149 1116 642
41 Actually, you're right. Everyone does want a piece of you. 1.8231 0.01472 2662 1045 1043 574
42 The patient won't tell us his name, so for the moment he's just John Dough. 1.8220 0.01518 2674 1104 942 628
43 And tomorrow when you wake up, you'll be a gingerbread woman. 1.8091 0.01912 1828 818 541 469
44 We're here to serve you. 1.7993 0.01633 2297 980 798 519
45 On a scale of 1 to 10, how crummy do you feel? 1.7987 0.01762 1883 778 706 399
46 Welcome to the Culinary Care Unit. 1.7953 0.01709 1988 822 751 415
47 This is the team that put Humpty Dumpty back together again. 1.7932 0.01852 1741 737 627 377
48 We were wondering if we could take a few more samples. 1.7926 0.01785 1784 730 694 360
49 Congratulations. You're now transginger. 1.7898 0.01593 2597 1186 771 640
50 "I'm sorry, did you just say bite me?". 1.7878 0.01667 2276 1012 735 529
51 You are one sick cookie. 1.7877 0.01588 2492 1103 815 574
52 It's a miracle you lasted through the holidays. 1.7868 0.01515 2425 988 966 471
53 I'm not going to sugarcoat this. 1.7824 0.01450 2767 1171 1027 569
54 You'll be able to walk again, but only gingerly. 1.7824 0.02478 956 407 350 199
55 Despite our best efforts, the confection is spreading. 1.7787 0.01637 2205 949 795 461
56 You’d have the option to donate your body to science or to the bake sale. 1.7784 0.01804 1823 787 653 383
57 They're here to take samples. 1.7740 0.01520 2412 1006 945 461
58 So. What's eating you? 1.7723 0.01666 2161 950 753 458
59 On the bright side, none of us thought you'd make it through Christmas. 1.7646 0.01656 2060 881 783 396
60 We've decided to keep you here for another 20 minutes at 350 degrees. 1.7601 0.01611 2218 968 814 436
61 You are one tough cookie. 1.7580 0.01477 2661 1172 961 528
62 I've done all I can do. It's time to meet your baker. 1.7575 0.01561 2532 1162 822 548
63 We're moving you to the cafeteria. 1.7575 0.01541 2577 1177 848 552
64 We had to remove your raisins. 1.7537 0.02035 1417 633 500 284
65 Good news: Your toothpick test came out clear. 1.7485 0.01940 1527 679 553 295
66 You were running a temperature of 350°, but we brought it down with some icing. 1.7477 0.02520 872 379 334 159
67 We need to transfer you to the cafeteria. 1.7464 0.02130 1246 550 462 234
68 He doesn't have Medicare or Medicaid, but he is covered by KitchenAid. 1.7445 0.02166 1311 613 420 278
69 The good news is, you're out of the burn unit. 1.7396 0.01797 1782 805 636 341
70 The whole procedure should take about an hour, at 350 degrees. 1.7373 0.01550 2391 1083 853 455
71 Not to worry—it's a convection oven, so you should be in and out in no time. 1.7325 0.02538 845 373 325 147
72 Apparently, these are the only specialists covered by your insurance. 1.7323 0.02537 904 416 314 174
73 Unfortunately, there's no way to sugarcoat this. 1.7314 0.01714 1940 883 695 362
74 He was admitted under the name of “John Dough.” 1.7291 0.01817 1798 843 599 356
75 There's a Do Not Reheat order. 1.7284 0.01853 1701 790 583 328
76 We have found a donor and he's gluten free. 1.7263 0.02057 1352 622 478 252
77 Fear of being eaten is normal for someone in your condition. 1.7260 0.02524 876 397 322 157
78 Insurance is not an issue here. He’s rolling in dough. 1.7241 0.01864 1638 754 582 302
79 Your molasses is too low; your cinnamon is too high, and your clove is off the charts. 1.7212 0.02112 1302 610 445 247
80 We have one question: “Do you know the muffin man?” 1.7188 0.02302 1152 559 358 235
81 Your transginger procedure will involve adding gumdrops and removing your nutmeg. 1.7176 0.04103 386 195 105 86
82 It seems that you have a yeast infection from that pop tart you, um, picked up. 1.7151 0.02456 1046 521 302 223
83 My colleagues suggest icing your leg. 1.7149 0.01707 1957 916 683 358
84 We didn't think you'd make it past Christmas 1.7142 0.01644 2040 937 749 354
85 Tell us how the hospital can best serve you. 1.7135 0.01966 1553 752 494 307
86 I’ll say this…  you’re one tough cookie. 1.7122 0.01799 1772 836 610 326
87 The patient is male, 10-12 minutes of age, presents with fever of 350 degrees, and is considered a flight risk. 1.7067 0.02133 1289 622 423 244
88 Great news. Your biopsy was delicious. 1.7064 0.01907 1679 831 510 338
89 We’re going to try icing it. 1.7052 0.02092 1262 589 456 217
90 And if none of that works, try icing it 1.7052 0.01773 1886 919 604 363
91 We’re going to keep you in for some tastes. I mean...tests. 1.7051 0.02119 1231 575 444 212
92 We're going to move you down to the cafeteria. 1.7032 0.01817 1708 810 595 303
93 You’re doing well considering that you were beaten and battered. 1.7008 0.02085 1307 625 448 234
94 Unfortunately what you have may lead to consumption. 1.7002 0.01913 1591 773 522 296
95 Would you like to donate your body to the Girl Scouts? 1.6997 0.01968 1525 748 487 290
96 Just a few degrees more and he would've been toast. 1.6977 0.04007 354 170 121 63
97 We'll need some samples 1.6973 0.02195 1130 530 412 188
98 We're surprised you lasted through the holidays. 1.6959 0.01809 1618 749 612 257
99 We'll know more after the taste test. 1.6956 0.01830 1623 763 591 269
100 It will be a one time procedure for 12 minutes at 350 degrees. 1.6944 0.02188 1129 530 414 185
101 The patient will be referred to as John Dough 1.6926 0.02039 1425 708 447 270
102 Another 15 minutes at 350 and you'll be up and running again. 1.6890 0.02158 1151 543 423 185
103 Good news! We found a donor, it'll be a piece of cake! 1.6879 0.02022 1400 687 463 250
104 Bad news. You're going to make it home for Christmas. 1.6852 0.02459 861 402 328 131
105 Your surgery will take 10 to 12 minutes at 350 degrees. 1.6852 0.01948 1401 662 518 221
106 Good news. Tests indicate that you are not paranoid. Everyone DOES want a piece you. 1.6820 0.02050 1305 631 458 216
107 He came in with a temperature of 350°. 1.6820 0.02088 1330 664 425 241
108 I won't sugarcoat it, we're looking at a massive confection. 1.6807 0.02131 1306 662 399 245
109 I'm afraid you only have until Christmas. 1.6807 0.02205 1143 558 392 193
110 We've identified the problem; you're half-baked 1.6800 0.02265 1097 540 368 189
111 We believe you have an Edible Complex. 1.6800 0.02176 1200 594 396 210
112 The good news is that it is just a yeast infection. 1.6780 0.02399 1031 525 313 193
113 You're done. 1.6768 0.02838 727 368 226 133
114 You have until Christmas. 1.6765 0.02279 1116 562 353 201
115 What on Earth makes you think we practice cookie-cutter medicine? 1.6756 0.02425 974 488 314 172
116 With your insurance, the procedure would cost you an arm and a leg. 1.6754 0.02189 1217 616 380 221
117 My colleagues recommend icing to bring down the fever. 1.6739 0.02108 1193 574 434 185
118 It was touch and go there, for a while, but it turns out you're one tough cookie. 1.6721 0.02142 1168 567 417 184
119 I'm afraid there's no way to sugarcoat this. 1.6703 0.02244 1089 537 374 178
120 Lastly, do you know the muffin man? 1.6696 0.02287 1120 574 342 204
121 You'll be fine but your house is a total loss. 1.6673 0.02303 1058 531 348 179
122 "Gender" reassignment? We thought you said "ginger". 1.6641 0.02460 1042 562 268 212
123 This time tomorrow, you'll be the Gingerbread Woman! 1.6620 0.02467 1006 535 276 195
124 We believe you are suffering from a yeast infection. 1.6618 0.02398 1029 537 303 189
125 You have 350 degree burns all over your body. 1.6616 0.02404 981 500 313 168
126 We can fix you up, but it'll take a lot of dough. 1.6607 0.02328 1008 504 342 162
127 They tell me another 5 minutes at 350 and you’ll be ready to go home 1.6587 0.02341 964 475 343 146
128 You've got gingervitis. 1.6580 0.02487 965 509 277 179
129 If you don't make it through surgery, would you be willing to donate your body to a kid's birthday party in Brooklyn? 1.6574 0.02473 931 479 292 160
130 I'm afraid our first diagnosis was half-baked. 1.6558 0.03026 523 246 211 66
131 We found a potential donor and ran some tests. Unfortunately, he was delicious. 1.6521 0.02554 894 470 265 159
132 I'm sorry to tell you this, but everyone wants another biopsy. 1.6494 0.02605 830 430 261 139
133 What seems to be eating you? 1.6491 0.02554 835 425 278 132
134 I’d like you to meet your makers. 1.6486 0.02554 851 438 274 139
135 You are going to be OK, but the first responders ate your house. 1.6484 0.02573 859 448 265 146
136 How long have you felt that the spice has gone out of your life? 1.6479 0.02602 818 421 264 133
137 You'll be discharged at noon but only if the results of your toothpick test comes back clean. 1.6467 0.02544 835 425 280 130
138 Could you show us exactly where you were bitten? 1.6460 0.02524 839 425 286 128
139 We're just trying to determine what's eating you. 1.6450 0.02538 814 409 285 120
140 This is the worst case of gingervitis I have ever seen 1.6450 0.02660 783 405 251 127
141 I’m afraid the stiffness will only get worse. 1.6444 0.02678 717 357 258 102
142 Don't worry, we won't bite. 1.6423 0.02696 766 399 242 125
143 Sore knee, huh...did you try icing it? 1.6406 0.02754 768 411 222 135
144 You can get a second opinion, but we think 15 minutes at 350 degrees was the right call. 1.6405 0.02588 776 391 273 112
145 We recommend complete bed rest and another 10 minutes at 350 degrees. 1.6404 0.02583 773 388 275 110
146 I've brought in a team of specialists to run some tastes. 1.6397 0.02565 780 391 279 110
147 You want to show us where you were bitten 1.6397 0.02628 766 390 262 114
148 Good news. Turns out you don't even have a prostate. 1.6386 0.02943 653 345 199 109
149 They'll have you flat on your back again in no time at all. 1.6370 0.02703 730 375 245 110
150 Don't worry, we're baking you a new one. 1.6367 0.02696 735 378 246 111
151 Well, yes - you are half-baked. 1.6345 0.02597 725 358 274 93
152 The specialists agree with me. You're done. 1.6339 0.02664 691 342 260 89
153 So far, we have been able to fight off consumption. 1.6329 0.02745 700 360 237 103
154 It's time to meet your makers 1.6328 0.02745 719 375 233 111
155 So, can you show us where she bit you. 1.6325 0.02987 615 323 195 97
156 Your sugar level is off the charts 1.6317 0.02814 676 351 223 102
157 The doctors here can't figure out what's wrong with you so we've brought in some specialists. 1.6294 0.03019 591 309 192 90
158 The biggest risk with the dunk procedure, of course, is loss of limb. 1.6291 0.02814 674 351 222 101
159 We couldn't save the house. 1.6287 0.03171 571 309 165 97
160 Your test results are back. All inserted toothpicks came out clean. 1.6276 0.02834 666 348 218 100
161 We all agree that there's nothing to worry about. It's just a simple yeast infection. 1.6276 0.02870 674 359 207 108
162 Don't focus on their hats -- these people are here to serve you. 1.6271 0.02887 641 335 210 96
163 I'm sorry to inform you that your sugar level is dangerously high. 1.6267 0.02842 659 344 217 98
164 A classic case of gingervitis. 1.6265 0.02852 656 343 215 98
165 Just a teaspoon of baking powder and it will rise again 1.6261 0.02894 658 350 204 104
166 We’ll have you up and eaten in no time. 1.6260 0.02848 655 342 216 97
167 Welcome to Cook County Hospital. 1.6256 0.02998 649 356 180 113
168 As slow as you're moving, they feel it has to be the molasses. 1.6252 0.02820 651 336 223 92
169 Don't worry: Nobody's gonna bite your head off. 1.6228 0.02880 639 335 210 94
170 Well Mr. Ginger, you say you heard something snap? 1.6226 0.02988 628 339 187 102
171 We're moving you to the cafeteria. 1.6224 0.02888 617 319 212 86
172 The test results are in, your sugar levels are way too high. 1.6196 0.02868 623 323 214 86
173 After you ran as fast as you could, what happened? 1.6195 0.03005 615 332 185 98
174 We'll have you up and edible in no time. 1.6188 0.03060 585 314 180 91
175 After the surgery, you'll walk with a candy cane. 1.6188 0.03012 585 309 190 86
176 You are one tough cookie. 1.6188 0.03022 585 310 188 87
177 Results are in, you have gingervitis. 1.6187 0.03152 577 317 163 97
178 Have you decided whether you'd prefer to pay with an arm or a leg? 1.6172 0.03131 593 329 162 102
179 The bad news: we have to amputate. The good news: coffee's brewing. 1.6171 0.02972 598 316 195 87
180 He's complaining of joint pain and says that icing doesn't help. 1.6163 0.02948 602 317 199 86
181 What we have here is one sick cookie! 1.6162 0.03154 568 311 164 93
182 Well, there's no sugar coating this... 1.6162 0.02950 594 311 200 83
183 I'm afraid I can't sugar coat this... 1.6159 0.02973 565 291 200 74
184 I'm afraid it's a yeast infection. 1.6153 0.03080 590 322 173 95
185 Bad news. It's gingervitis. 1.6121 0.03214 544 299 157 88
186 You've got two weeks left. Maybe four, if we freeze you. 1.6103 0.03110 526 276 179 71
187 Your tests results are in and you need 15 more minutes at 350. 1.6101 0.03107 554 298 174 82
188 We've determined that you have a yeast infection. 1.6097 0.03140 556 303 167 86
189 We're trying to find a donor made from the same recipe. 1.6091 0.03061 550 291 183 76
190 Don't worry. It's just a simple yeast infection. 1.6089 0.03103 560 303 173 84
191 You know you're going to have to inform all your previous partners. Do you know the Muffin Man? 1.6081 0.03176 546 299 162 85
192 I'll tell you what: you're one tough cookie. 1.6077 0.03243 543 303 150 90
193 You have a yeast infection. 1.6056 0.03300 540 307 139 94
194 We are pleased to report that your gumdrops came back benign. 1.6042 0.03209 523 285 160 78
195 I know what you mean. I feel like everyone wants a piece of me too. 1.6034 0.03121 522 277 175 70
196 We’ll treat your condition as gingerly as possible. 1.6028 0.03159 501 264 172 65
197 In your condition, we'll have to treat you gingerly. 1.6027 0.03052 516 267 187 62
198 I don't think he'll make it past the holidays. 1.6023 0.03176 513 275 167 71
199 My colleagues and I are debating how best to serve you. 1.6020 0.03154 510 271 171 68
200 We’ve ruled out a yeast infection. 1.6016 0.03132 512 271 174 67
201 Still feeling crummy? 1.6015 0.03193 517 280 163 74
202 Fortunately, no one can catch it. You're the gingerbread man. 1.6012 0.03326 509 285 142 82
203 Good news. Your insurance covers frosting. 1.6000 0.03238 475 251 163 61
204 Don't worry, we won't bite. 1.5996 0.03269 487 263 156 68
205 Your blood sugar is through the roof. 1.5996 0.03308 487 266 150 71
206 We're amazed you made it through the holidays. 1.5988 0.03221 481 255 164 62
207 There's no way to sugar coat this... 1.5980 0.03254 500 273 155 72
208 Prepare to meet your baker. 1.5978 0.03403 465 256 140 69
209 Now, about your house... 1.5976 0.03194 497 266 165 66
210 Your sugar is high. 1.5974 0.03351 467 254 147 66
211 The good news is you're fine. The bad news is these aren't doctors. 1.5971 0.03435 489 279 128 82
212 Tests confirm a severe case of gingervitis. 1.5963 0.03344 483 267 144 72
213 Exactly at what time and temperature did you wake up to that burning sensation? 1.5963 0.03062 483 246 186 51
214 We had to take a raisin, but we saved all your frosting. 1.5962 0.03238 478 255 161 62
215 We don't mind the term "cookie cutter", but we prefer "confectionery surgeon". 1.5962 0.03486 478 274 123 81
216 He came in complaining of 'feeling crumby'." 1.5959 0.03165 490 259 170 61
217 The lab results are back, and you're going to be okay. You are one tough cookie. 1.5954 0.03311 482 264 149 69
218 Your test results came back. Unfortunately, they're delicious. 1.5945 0.03422 476 268 133 75
219 We think it's a yeast infection. 1.5937 0.03402 475 266 136 73
220 You're feeling crumby. Could you be more specific? 1.5936 0.03350 470 258 145 67
221 Don’t worry, we’ll have you running away fast as you can in no time. 1.5932 0.03230 472 251 162 59
222 The good and bad news is that we've upgraded your status to "delicious". 1.5928 0.03232 469 249 162 58
223 We have bad news, you tested positive for gluten. 1.5924 0.03305 471 256 151 64
224 Well, I'm not gonna sugar-coat it... 1.5921 0.03294 478 261 151 66
225 It’s normal to feel warm for a while. 1.5914 0.03220 443 229 166 48
226 I'm afraid he's not going to make it past Christmas. 1.5913 0.03280 460 246 156 58
227 More tastes – I mean tests – are necessary. 1.5912 0.03394 455 250 141 64
228 I'm afraid the surgery will cost an arm and a leg. 1.5908 0.03439 457 255 134 68
229 He has that glazed over look. 1.5900 0.03347 461 252 146 63
230 This procedure may cost you an arm and a leg. 1.5886 0.03341 457 249 147 61
231 Bad news, I'm afraid. Prepare to meet your Bakers. 1.5884 0.03486 430 237 133 60
232 Don't worry, it's a straightforward cookie cutter procedure. 1.5884 0.03608 430 245 117 68
233 I'm afraid it's going to be, "Walk, walk, as fast as you can," from now on, Mr. Gingerbread Man. 1.5874 0.03390 446 244 142 60
234 I'm afraid fixing you up is going to take a lot of dough. 1.5874 0.03345 446 241 148 57
235 We’re going to need to take a biopsy. And depending how it tastes, we may need to amputate. 1.5869 0.03496 426 235 132 59
236 When did you notice the burning feeling? 1.5865 0.03260 445 235 159 51
237 Can you be more specific about feeling "half baked"? 1.5845 0.03439 438 242 136 60
238 The operation was a complete success: you are now gluten-free! 1.5843 0.03328 433 231 151 51
239 For the second opinion your requested, I've brought in experts from Pillsbury, Pepperidge Farm and Betty Crocker. 1.5823 0.04586 237 129 78 30
240 His hope is to avoid consumption. 1.5820 0.03414 445 247 137 61
241 There's no easy way to put this, at best you're looking at a 1-2 week shelf life. Maybe 3 if we use preservatives. 1.5818 0.03342 428 229 149 50
242 It seems he has a bad case of gingervitis. 1.5818 0.03486 428 238 131 59
243 I'm afraid to tell you it's time to meet your makers. 1.5803 0.03541 417 233 126 58
244 The results were fine, but we're concerned about your sugar. 1.5803 0.03541 417 233 126 58
245 And as for exercise, I recommend you run, run as fast as you can. 1.5803 0.03476 417 229 134 54
246 Just keep icing it and you’ll be fine 1.5802 0.03725 393 224 110 59
247 You'll need a combination of rest and icing. 1.5789 0.03580 380 206 128 46
248 We're just going to run a few taste tests. 1.5789 0.03578 399 221 125 53
249 We're sorry but it doesn't look like you'll make it past Christmas. 1.5787 0.03612 394 219 122 53
250 You'll need to walk gingerly at first. 1.5774 0.03490 407 223 133 51
251 Your temperature's 350. You're free to go. 1.5771 0.03582 428 246 117 65
252 The Lab tests indicate a yeast infection 1.5768 0.03765 397 231 103 63
253 Just as we feared: You're half-baked. 1.5754 0.03656 398 226 115 57
254 No worries, it's just a yeast infection. 1.5754 0.03604 398 223 121 54
255 He's one sick cookie 1.5752 0.03691 412 240 107 65
256 Frankly, I'm stumped, so I've brought in some specialists. 1.5747 0.03499 395 215 133 47
257 We are happy to report you are now gluten free. 1.5737 0.03791 380 219 104 57
258 Your sugar levels are off the charts. 1.5729 0.03564 391 216 126 49
259 I'm afraid it's time to meet your makers. 1.5718 0.03677 383 216 115 52
260 We successfully gave you some nuts. 1.5714 0.03964 385 234 82 69
261 I'm afraid it's time to meet your makers. 1.5714 0.04047 371 226 78 67
262 The team agrees. It's gingervitis. 1.5714 0.03753 385 222 106 57
263 The police think this attack might have been personal, Mr. Ginger....Do you know the muffin man? 1.5714 0.03699 385 219 112 54
264 I don't know how to tell you this, but your stool samples...were delicious! 1.5703 0.03961 377 227 85 65
265 We can help, but without insurance, it will cost you an arm and a leg. 1.5702 0.03948 342 196 97 49
266 We recommend icing. 1.5699 0.03474 379 203 136 40
267 So tell us, what's eating you? 1.5699 0.03631 379 211 120 48
268 We checked with ancestry.com and you're only 5% ginger. 1.5691 0.03843 376 220 98 58
269 So you say you’ve been feeling crumby all week? 1.5684 0.03719 380 217 110 53
270 You’re not paranoid. Everyone really is out to eat you. 1.5678 0.03783 354 199 109 46
271 The good news is, the operation was a success. The bad news is, we're hungry. 1.5673 0.03709 379 216 111 52
272 It's a simple operation that lasts only twenty-five minutes at 325 degrees. 1.5670 0.03752 358 201 111 46
273 I've brought some experts in to discuss your sugar levels. 1.5664 0.03607 369 203 123 43
274 My colleagues all agree: You're done. 1.5664 0.03667 369 206 117 46
275 Your sugar levels are too high. 1.5664 0.03545 369 200 129 40
276 Remember us, we worked on your house? 1.5664 0.03545 369 200 129 40
277 Now this is one tough cookie 1.5649 0.03779 370 213 105 52
278 Your blood sugar's a little high. 1.5647 0.03754 363 206 109 48
279 It seems you will no longer be able to run, run, as fast as you can. 1.5647 0.03714 363 204 113 46
280 I don't know what you've been up to lately, but your nutmeg levels are off the charts again. 1.5639 0.03590 360 196 125 39
281 So you say you had a fever of 375 degrees? 1.5630 0.03824 357 205 103 49
282 They are here to serve you. 1.5625 0.03825 336 188 107 41
283 We think you'll be better with a glass of milk. 1.5621 0.03974 322 183 97 42
284 The "operation" was a success. You are now a transginger. 1.5613 0.03862 367 216 96 55
285 Frankly, I was hoping this case would be a piece of cake. 1.5613 0.03746 351 197 111 43
286 I brought in a team of specialists, your confection seems to be spreading. 1.5600 0.03755 350 197 110 43
287 The treatment worked really well for Fruit Cake. He lasted forever. 1.5598 0.03879 343 197 100 46
288 We must admit, we didn't think you'd make it past December 1.5598 0.03790 343 193 108 42
289 I think we can rule out low blood sugar. 1.5596 0.03929 327 186 99 42
290 So do high sugar levels run in your family? 1.5583 0.03891 326 184 102 40
291 We're gonna have to cut out your nuts. 1.5581 0.04084 344 208 80 56
292 And here we have a classic case of extreme Gingervitis 1.5581 0.03827 344 196 104 44
293 The good news is you’re still edible. 1.5579 0.03849 328 184 105 39
294 I'm sorry, we had no choice but to remove your jelly bean. 1.5575 0.03848 339 193 103 43
295 Strangely, butter seems to make you better. 1.5572 0.03740 341 190 112 39
296 You were in cardamom arrest. 1.5572 0.03808 341 193 106 42
297 They want me to release you before dinner. 1.5572 0.03785 341 192 108 41
298 High sugar and cholesterol, burns over half of his body, survived a fox attack. That’s one tough cookie. 1.5572 0.03964 341 200 92 49
299 Surgery is out of the question, so we're going to dunk you in milk until something falls off. 1.5566 0.03907 327 186 100 41
300 We recommend icing. 1.5562 0.03971 320 183 96 41
301 Don't worry. The operation will be a piece of cake. 1.5562 0.03996 320 184 94 42
302 You're in good hands. They put Humpty Dumpty together again. 1.5562 0.03922 320 181 100 39
303 Cookie. Age indeterminate. Morbid gingervitis with with early onset crumbling. Runaway fantasies. 1.5562 0.03924 338 196 96 46
304 Fortunately, your condition is not serious. We recommend icing. 1.5562 0.03788 338 190 108 40
305 It will be an honor to serve you. 1.5562 0.03718 338 187 114 37
306 I don't want any more of your half-baked opinions. 1.5559 0.03655 340 186 119 35
307 Well, to start, your sugar levels are a touch high. 1.5556 0.03755 342 192 110 40
308 Amazing! No one thought he’d make it past the holidays. 1.5552 0.03814 335 189 106 40
309 Unfortunately, we can't use the cookie cutter approach this time. 1.5552 0.03925 317 179 100 38
310 I think you have gingervitis. 1.5552 0.03925 317 179 100 38
311 I tend to agree with them that you're half-baked. 1.5545 0.03881 330 188 101 41
312 After the surgery her name will be Ginger. 1.5542 0.04158 332 202 76 54
313 Our initial medical evaluation indicates the first known case of a male being made of sugar and spice and everything nice. 1.5542 0.03979 332 194 92 46
314 Still low sugar, but your ginger levels look fine. 1.5532 0.03720 329 181 114 34
315 He's going to make it, he's a tough cookie. 1.5523 0.04031 306 175 93 38
316 We've called in the specialists. We'll start your tasting, uh, I mean testing, this afternoon. 1.5521 0.03511 326 171 130 25
317 The amputation is scheduled for 15 minutes prior to coffee break. 1.5521 0.03989 326 190 92 44
318 My team here all agree that the best thing for that elbow is a little icing. 1.5521 0.03795 326 182 108 36
319 The lab results are in, and you're delicious. 1.5519 0.04116 308 180 86 42
320 Looks like a bad case of gingervitis. 1.5512 0.04322 303 184 71 48
321 The biopsy came back delicious. 1.5511 0.03796 323 180 108 35
322 We heard you're feeling crummy. 1.5510 0.04056 314 183 89 42
323 Don't worry, no one wants to bite your head off. 1.5500 0.03797 320 178 108 34
324 This is an experimental treatment; so far we've only tried it on snickerdoodles. 1.5500 0.03899 320 182 100 38
325 The good news is, you're healthy. The bad news is, you're delicious. 1.5497 0.04123 322 193 81 48
326 You were almost toast, but you're one tough cookie. 1.5497 0.03955 322 186 95 41
327 However, should the unforeseen occur, would you consider donating your body to the cafeteria? 1.5497 0.04146 322 194 79 49
328 The good news is your tumors are raisins. 1.5497 0.03881 322 183 101 38
329 The sample came back delicious and we'd like to run a few more tests. 1.5490 0.04006 306 175 94 37
330 Treat him gingerly. 1.5489 0.03978 317 183 94 40
331 It appears you're half baked. 1.5485 0.04158 299 175 84 40
332 We were able to save your leg, but you'll want to stay away from milk for at least two weeks. 1.5475 0.04063 316 186 87 43
333 our next patient has had a temperature of 350 for about 20 minutes 1.5463 0.03991 313 181 93 39
334 He was found half baked. 1.5461 0.04054 293 167 92 34
335 Your sugar's a little too high. 1.5461 0.03967 293 164 98 31
336 The operation was a success! You are now gluten-free! 1.5461 0.04306 293 176 74 43
337 Unfortunately your HMO will only pay for 1/4 tsp of sugar. 1.5455 0.04092 308 181 86 41
338 It's your knees. They want to try icing them. 1.5455 0.04040 308 179 90 39
339 The main thing is to avoid being eaten at least four hours before surgery. 1.5452 0.03942 310 177 97 36
340 In your case, it will literally cost an arm and a leg. 1.5448 0.04229 290 171 80 39
341 We're just here to take some samples. 1.5446 0.04064 303 176 89 38
342 The patient complained that he was experiencing temperatures of 350 degrees for 20 minutes. 1.5439 0.04053 296 170 91 35
343 We cant give you a new heart, but we can give you sprinkles. 1.5439 0.03925 285 157 101 27
344 We recommend that you run, run just as fast as you can. 1.5438 0.04796 217 126 64 27
345 I'm happy to report that your gumdrops are entirely benign. 1.5433 0.04095 300 175 87 38
346 ... and your glucose levels are off the chart. 1.5430 0.04048 302 175 90 37
347 A transplant is available, but it's from a Graham cracker. 1.5430 0.03993 302 173 94 35
348 I'd like to introduce you to the team here in the Burn Unit. 1.5428 0.04055 304 177 89 38
349 Treat him gingerly. 1.5428 0.03946 304 173 97 34
350 Good news! You’re gluten-free. Bad news. You’re still delicious. 1.5422 0.05309 166 94 54 18
351 He arrived half-baked. 1.5418 0.04133 299 176 84 39
352 The first thing we need to do is take a sample. 1.5414 0.04231 290 172 79 39
353 We'd like you to cut back on your sugar, but add a touch of cinnamon. 1.5414 0.04116 290 168 87 35
354 Hmm, how do I put this gingerly? 1.5413 0.04275 303 185 72 46
355 It's the worst case of gingervitus we've seen. 1.5410 0.04202 305 184 77 44
356 I'm sorry son, but the prognosis is grim. I'm afraid... it's time to meet your makers. 1.5392 0.04085 293 170 88 35
357 The earlier tests were inconclusive, so we're going to need seconds. 1.5385 0.04101 286 165 88 33
358 He'll have a large scar, but that can be covered with icing. 1.5376 0.04269 279 165 78 36
359 Got milk? Just kidding! 1.5372 0.03941 296 168 97 31
360 They're here to grease your bedpan. 1.5368 0.04414 272 164 70 38
361 I need to break this to you gingerly. 1.5366 0.04150 287 168 84 35
362 Would it put your mind at ease if I said they're medical students? 1.5364 0.04077 302 178 86 38
363 You may be walking gingerly the next couple of days. 1.5356 0.04066 295 172 88 35
364 We’re going to need a large glass of milk, stat! 1.5352 0.04032 284 162 92 30
365 Well, your test results are back, and I'm happy to say you're gluten free. 1.5352 0.04153 284 166 84 34
366 Do you know the muffin man ? 1.5350 0.04306 286 173 73 40
367 Don't worry. We'll have you up and running in no time. 1.5347 0.04140 288 169 84 35
368 Good news, sir...you're done. 1.5341 0.04116 279 161 87 31
369 "I'm sorry sir. You won't make it past Christmas." -Stella Panarelli, age 10 1.5341 0.04300 279 167 75 37
370 Nothing to worry about, just a routine taste test. 1.5338 0.04126 281 163 86 32
371 You’ll be happy to know your biopsy got rave reviews. 1.5337 0.04814 208 121 63 24
372 You're now a gingerbread woman. We hope you're happy. 1.5324 0.04342 278 168 72 38
373 Your expiration date was two months ago. Your health insurance company has declined your claim. 1.5324 0.04312 278 167 74 37
374 I’m afraid milk’s set in — we can’t save the leg. 1.5321 0.04243 265 154 81 30
375 Sir, it's time for you to meet your makers. 1.5319 0.04206 282 167 80 35
376 Turns out, it was just a yeast infection. 1.5315 0.04250 286 172 76 38
377 The surgery will cost you an arm and a leg. 1.5312 0.04319 256 149 78 29
378 Looking on the bright side, you outlived the sell by date. 1.5311 0.04216 273 160 81 32
379 Unfortunately, the insurance only covered 5 minutes in the oven. 1.5311 0.04311 273 163 75 35
380 Your glucose is off the chart. 1.5311 0.04279 273 162 77 34
381 We'll be moving you to a lightly floured surface. 1.5305 0.04314 262 154 77 31
382 We’ll need more than “I feel crumby.” 1.5296 0.04153 270 156 85 29
383 Don't worry. The procedure is a snap. 1.5296 0.04052 270 153 91 26
384 We’ve got to treat him gingerly. 1.5294 0.04163 272 158 84 30
385 when I suggested ginger he just snapped 1.5294 0.04385 272 165 70 37
386 He made it out safely, but unfortunately we were unable to save the house. 1.5287 0.04258 261 152 80 29
387 He’s not contagious - you can’t catch the gingerbread man. 1.5281 0.04417 267 162 69 36
388 The bad news is...we're hungry. 1.5281 0.04320 267 159 75 33
389 Seems to be a yeast infection. 1.5281 0.04417 267 162 69 36
390 We'll need to take some samples. 1.5277 0.04240 271 160 79 32
391 We brought milk. You won't feel a thing. 1.5267 0.04315 262 155 76 31
392 The bad news is that your sugar and cholesterol levels are very high. The good news is you are well done. 1.5267 0.04349 262 156 74 32
393 So, are you still feeling crummy? 1.5265 0.04189 264 153 83 28
394 We are concerned that your sugar levcl is very high.. 1.5265 0.04084 264 150 89 25
395 They say you're one tough cookie. 1.5265 0.04291 264 156 77 31
396 He is a tough cookie. He will be fine. 1.5263 0.04166 266 154 84 28
397 Our team has determined you have acute gingervitis. 1.5261 0.04405 268 163 69 36
398 The good news is that you're delicious. 1.5261 0.04308 268 160 75 33
399 It looks like gumdrop enlargements would not be covered by your insurance. 1.5261 0.04341 268 161 73 34
400 My team's most recent success was freeing four-and-twenty blackbirds that were somehow baked in a pie. 1.5259 0.04486 232 135 72 25
401 I'm sorry to tell you this, but the icing appears to have spread. 1.5253 0.04201 257 148 83 26
402 I called in some leading spatulists. 1.5250 0.05009 200 120 55 25
403 Thank you for donating your body to culinary science. 1.5249 0.04259 261 153 79 29
404 The kitchen staff will prepare you for the operation 1.5249 0.04118 261 149 87 25
405 Are you ready to meet your makers? 1.5245 0.04378 265 160 71 34
406 The entire team wants to apologize for forgetting your nose 1.5245 0.04074 265 151 89 25
407 The good news is you'll still technically be able to run as fast you can. 1.5245 0.04279 265 157 77 31
408 I am sorry. Your expiration date is Tuesday. There is nothing we can do. 1.5234 0.04356 256 152 74 30
409 He says he always felt like a gingerbreadwoman. 1.5233 0.04400 258 155 71 32
410 You’ll be ready to go home, once my colleagues bake you a house. 1.5231 0.04166 260 150 84 26
411 They were wondering if you'd like them to bake you some visitors. 1.5231 0.04374 260 156 72 32
412 You’ll have to move ginger...ah...carefully until the stitches come out. 1.5231 0.04021 260 146 92 22
413 We've narrowed it down to a few different spices. 1.5231 0.04237 260 152 80 28
414 You are ready to go home, but unfortunately we ate it. 1.5221 0.04447 249 149 70 30
415 We did not expect you to rise. 1.5217 0.04286 253 148 78 27
416 Well, we’re split - two say you’re underdone, two say you’re overdone, and one just wants to see if you have a penis. 1.5216 0.04610 255 159 59 37
417 Your sugar is a bit high but otherwise you're fine. 1.5211 0.04225 261 153 80 28
418 The problem is your circulation -- it's as slow as molasses. 1.5209 0.04337 263 158 73 32
419 We're going to proceed gingerly. 1.5200 0.04361 250 148 74 28
420 It appears all your running has finally caught up with you. 1.5198 0.04299 252 148 77 27
421 And we recommend icing to keep down the inflammation. 1.5198 0.04262 252 147 79 26
422 Have you considered donating your body to the hospital cafeteria? 1.5198 0.04372 252 150 73 29
423 I'm afraid we could't stop the spread of confection. 1.5197 0.04311 254 150 76 28
424 Sorry, your insurance doesn't cover frosting. 1.5194 0.04226 258 151 80 27
425 We're here to serve you. 1.5193 0.04555 233 139 67 27
426 Ten minutes at 350 degrees and he'll be fine. 1.5188 0.04625 239 146 62 31
427 So you say you’re feeling crummy? 1.5172 0.04611 232 140 64 28
428 Our specialists have determined you have a yeast infection. 1.5164 0.04403 244 145 72 27
429 I'm sorry, sir, there's only one person who can perform your surgery. He lives on Drury Lane, up in Mulberry County. Do you know him? Do you know the muffin man? 1.5164 0.04325 244 143 76 25
430 I'm afraid your sugars are low. 1.5164 0.04286 244 142 78 24
431 The bad news is you're going to be delicious. 1.5164 0.04325 244 143 76 25
432 They say you weren't cut out for this. 1.5164 0.04403 244 145 72 27
433 We've decided to do a few taste tests. 1.5163 0.04489 246 149 67 30
434 You'll snap out of it. 1.5163 0.04562 246 151 63 32
435 It's a sraightfoward gender reassignment. We simply scrape off the blue icing and apply the pink. 1.5163 0.04376 246 146 73 27
436 Good news. The re-assignment baking was successful. You are now officially a Ginger Bread Man. 1.5163 0.04562 246 151 63 32
437 You’re lucky to be in one piece. 1.5145 0.04521 241 146 66 29
438 I won't be performing the transplant myself, but my staff here assures me it's a piece of cake. 1.5145 0.04482 241 145 68 28
439 Bed rest and icing should help. 1.5145 0.04404 241 143 72 26
440 Relax, they need just a couple of samples. 1.5143 0.04235 245 142 80 23
441 We're just going to hold you overnight for tasting. 1.5129 0.04362 232 135 75 22
442 The good news is you're fine. The bad news is you're delicious. 1.5127 0.04747 236 148 55 33
443 We'll know more after the taste test. 1.5127 0.04747 236 148 55 33
444 Contrary to my original diagnosis, my colleagues feel more sugar and butter would actually be good for you. 1.5126 0.04365 238 140 74 24
445 Yeast infection. 1.5126 0.04754 238 150 54 34
446 the team concurs that you're one sick cookie 1.5126 0.04524 238 144 66 28
447 You have nothing to worry about; our surgeons are all Zagat rated. 1.5126 0.04405 238 141 72 25
448 "He was found floating in a glass of milk. 1.5126 0.04445 238 142 70 26
449 We need to handle this one gingerly. 1.5125 0.04457 240 144 69 27
450 Well sir, it appears your diagnosis is 'too many cooks'. 1.5125 0.04418 240 143 71 26
451 We're sorry to inform you that you're only half baked. 1.5125 0.04611 240 148 61 31
452 I was afraid he wouldn't make it,but he's one tough cookie 1.5125 0.04496 240 145 67 28
453 You’ve been in a sugar induced coma for the last eight days. 1.5106 0.04447 235 140 70 25
454 We think if we give him 50cc of baking powder we can get him to rise up. 1.5106 0.04447 235 140 70 25
455 There's a lot to digest here. 1.5105 0.04212 237 136 81 20
456 He has gingervitis. 1.5086 0.04963 232 151 44 37
457 Your taste test came back positive. 1.5086 0.04447 232 138 70 24
458 We're going to have to run a few more taste tests. 1.5086 0.04447 232 138 70 24
459 It's serious, but don't worry folks, he's one tough cookie. 1.5086 0.04571 232 141 64 27
460 In this case you apply heat first, then you ice it. 1.5086 0.04447 232 138 70 24
461 We'll run those tests as fast as we can. 1.5086 0.04771 232 146 54 32
462 A nurse will be in shortly to transfer you to a plate. 1.5086 0.04732 232 145 56 31
463 Looking better today. You were half baked yesterday 1.5085 0.04378 234 138 73 23
464 The surgery will cost you an arm and a leg. 1.5085 0.04419 234 139 71 24
465 Looks like a bad case of gingervitis. 1.5085 0.04553 236 144 64 28
466 The procedure should only take an hour but we'll have to flip you over half way through. 1.5066 0.04342 227 132 75 20
467 Looks like a yeast infection. 1.5066 0.04646 227 139 61 27
468 We think you'll find that a microwave is no more invasive than an x-ray. 1.5066 0.04387 227 133 73 21
469 After much deliberation, we have decided to call your condition "Gingervitis"". 1.5066 0.04360 229 134 74 21
470 I'm sorry, but you have a terminal yeast infection. 1.5066 0.04779 229 144 54 31
471 Good news. We found an icing donor. 1.5066 0.04403 229 135 72 22
472 Call me if you have a confection lasting over four hours. 1.5066 0.04532 229 138 66 25
473 While the knee operation was a success, you'll have to use a candy cane. 1.5065 0.04708 231 144 57 30
474 Do you remember what you were doing when you snapped? 1.5063 0.04379 237 141 72 24
475 All he remembers is running as fast as he could. 1.5062 0.04326 241 143 74 24
476 Can you tell us what ingredients you've been taking? 1.5049 0.04636 204 120 65 19
477 Can you tell us your sell by date? 1.5047 0.04480 214 125 70 19
478 He's been feeling crummy. 1.5042 0.04514 236 144 65 27
479 The good news is you're not going to be a vegetable for the rest of your life. 1.5024 0.04568 205 120 67 18
480 Your sugar is off the charts. 1.5024 0.04837 207 127 56 24
481 You are in Cook County Hospital. 1.5023 0.04688 213 129 61 23
482 'Traces of nuts' should be the least of your concerns. 1.5023 0.04697 221 136 59 26
483 The bad news is they couldn't save your house. 1.5023 0.04426 221 130 71 20
484 Bad news. The INS is here. You're being sent back to Candyland. 1.5022 0.04835 223 141 52 30
485 Your road to recovery will be a snap. 1.5022 0.04489 223 133 68 22
486 The results are in. I'm afraid you have an Edible Complex. 1.5022 0.04548 225 136 65 24
487 The tests are in and I'm sorry. You're delicious. 1.5022 0.04634 225 138 61 26
488 Of course you can donate your body to science, but have you considered our cafeteria? 1.5022 0.04719 225 140 57 28
489 We must approach this gingerly. 1.5022 0.04278 225 130 77 18
490 We're all here to serve you. 1.5000 0.04579 220 133 64 23
491 Your blood sugar levels are troubling. 1.5000 0.04469 218 129 69 20
492 You should prepare to meet your baker. 1.5000 0.04533 220 132 66 22
493 It's just as we suspected, you're half baked. 1.5000 0.04487 220 131 68 21
494 Treatment will be over in a snap. 1.5000 0.04422 218 128 71 19
495 They're rebuilding your house as we speak. 1.5000 0.04393 220 129 72 19
496 It was a success, but your recovery will be slow as molasses. 1.5000 0.04637 222 136 61 25
497 I brought in some specialists. 1.4978 0.04761 225 142 54 29
498 My work is done here. The cafeteria staff will take over from here. 1.4977 0.04518 221 133 66 22
499 I'm sorry, but today is your expiration date. 1.4977 0.04484 217 129 68 20
500 It could be a yeast infection. 1.4977 0.04828 213 133 54 26
501 Sorry, but your friends didn’t make it past Christmas. 1.4977 0.04544 213 127 66 20
502 Christmas is over. You can stop faking now. 1.4976 0.04862 211 132 53 26
503 I’m afraid that you have a yeast infection. 1.4976 0.04933 207 130 51 26
504 Our recommendation is to stay away from milk. 1.4974 0.04844 195 118 57 20
505 We’re going to do some testing to see if you’re done. 1.4955 0.04519 224 136 65 23
506 His brown edges look normal. We'll let him cool here for 30 minutes before we release him to an air-tight container. He should be fine for up to five days. 1.4955 0.04533 220 133 65 22
507 I think you'll agree we don't need to sugarcoat this diagnosis. 1.4954 0.04777 216 135 55 26
508 We need to run a few taste tests. 1.4954 0.04777 216 135 55 26
509 This is what your policy covers for a pre-existing confection. 1.4953 0.04529 214 128 66 20
510 What are you talking about? Of course they're doctors, they're wearing white coats. 1.4953 0.04625 214 130 62 22
511 We're just here to take some samples. 1.4953 0.04765 214 133 56 25
512 I suggest that we try icing it 1.4953 0.04845 212 133 53 26
513 This is the team that also worked on Humpty Dumpty. 1.4952 0.04737 210 129 58 23
514 Get me 300cc of milk, stat. 1.4952 0.04926 210 133 50 27
515 The good news is that your family made it out of the oven just in time. 1.4952 0.04737 210 129 58 23
516 I’m afraid you have high blood sugar. 1.4952 0.04737 210 129 58 23
517 The good news is that the operation went well. The bad news is that we ate your house. 1.4952 0.04785 210 130 56 24
518 Your blood pressure and cholesterol are fine. It's your sugar we're worried about. 1.4952 0.04689 210 128 60 22
519 Your levels of fat and sugar are high, and that's where we want them to stay. 1.4952 0.04832 210 131 54 25
520 I see dozens of these cases. 1.4952 0.04689 210 128 60 22
521 I'm afraid your prognosis is Grimm. 1.4952 0.04879 210 132 52 26
522 It's time to meet your makers 1.4950 0.05209 200 130 41 29
523 Obviously we'll need to chew on this one for awhile. 1.4943 0.05222 176 109 47 20
524 His temperature is right at 350 degrees. 1.4932 0.04652 221 137 59 25
525 We believe the problem is a yeast infection. 1.4929 0.04954 211 135 48 28
526 We need to speak with you about your expiration date. 1.4929 0.04525 211 126 66 19
527 We are recommending a cardiac stress test. You'll have to run, run, run as fast as you can. 1.4929 0.04624 211 128 62 21
528 We think your sugar a little high. 1.4928 0.04705 209 128 59 22
529 I'll give it to you straight, it's a yeast infection. 1.4928 0.04897 209 132 51 26
530 I'd like you to meet our team of specialists. They're from the cafeteria. 1.4928 0.04705 209 128 59 22
531 In my professional opinion. Run run as fast as you can. 1.4928 0.04990 209 134 47 28
532 After reviewing your recipe, we've concluded you have a yeast infection. 1.4928 0.04980 207 132 48 27
533 I think we can just scrape off the burned parts. 1.4928 0.04689 207 126 60 21
534 Obviously you didn't run fast enough. 1.4910 0.04681 222 139 57 26
535 Let's see what we can do about getting that temperature down from 375 degrees. 1.4906 0.04936 212 136 48 28
536 It isn't every day we can eat our mistakes. 1.4902 0.04938 204 129 50 25
537 Great news! You will make a full recovery. Unfortunately the house was entirely devoured. 1.4901 0.04507 202 119 67 16
538 The good news is you're not diabetic. The bad news is neither are we. 1.4901 0.05169 202 132 41 29
539 The patient is complaining of feeling crumby 1.4901 0.04668 202 122 61 19
540 Great news! We have a donor. He’s a ginger snap, but it’s a match. 1.4901 0.04615 202 121 63 18
541 His temperature's down. For 10 minutes he was at 350°. 1.4900 0.04702 200 121 60 19
542 I'm afraid you're suffering from Seasonal Confection Disorder. 1.4894 0.04916 188 115 54 19
543 Considering his initial temperature was 350 degrees, I think he looks quite well. 1.4878 0.05063 205 133 44 28
544 We'll, his temp is down from 350 but his sugar's still high. 1.4877 0.04806 203 126 55 22
545 Vital signs are good, but he's looking a little pastry. 1.4877 0.04491 203 120 67 16
546 Our diagnosis is that you're half-baked. 1.4877 0.04755 203 125 57 21
547 Your test results came back. Your sugar levels are extremely high. 1.4877 0.04651 203 123 61 19
548 Congratulations, it's a madeleine. 1.4877 0.05101 203 132 43 28
549 Only he survived, the others were burnt to a crisp! 1.4877 0.04857 203 127 53 23
550 You'll be fine. Your temperature's back to 350 degrees. 1.4874 0.04554 199 118 65 16
551 We can save you but it's going to cost you a lot of dough. 1.4874 0.04718 199 121 59 19
552 We have diagnosed your condition as half-baked. 1.4874 0.04929 199 125 51 23
553 I’ve never seen such a bad case of gingervitis. 1.4874 0.04929 199 125 51 23
554 This won't take long. We're just waiting on an oven. 1.4848 0.04626 198 119 62 17
555 The kitchen staff hopes you'll reconsider signing your donor card. 1.4848 0.04895 198 124 52 22
556 After we add the green food coloring, your transformation to Gumby will be complete and irreversible. 1.4848 0.04895 198 124 52 22
557 Our team of bakers agrees you are fortunate to have survived the holidays with all your body parts intact. 1.4847 0.04659 196 118 61 17
558 Anesthetist? No, we're waiting for the milk man. 1.4847 0.04878 196 122 53 21
559 Sorry, we think you're done. 1.4847 0.04824 196 121 55 20
560 If he bends in the middle like that, he's not done. 1.4847 0.04715 196 119 59 18
561 Any food allergies? 1.4847 0.04824 196 121 55 20
562 I'm sorry, sir, but without treatment, the icing will spread. 1.4847 0.04824 196 121 55 20
563 Patient describes having acute fear of being eaten. 1.4847 0.04878 196 122 53 21
564 Ginger has significant health benefits but you might want to cut back on the butter and brown sugar. 1.4847 0.04487 196 115 67 14
565 By the time this procedure is done, you’ll be a gingerbread woman. 1.4847 0.05339 196 131 35 30
566 Unfortunately, there is no cookie-cutter treatment available. 1.4845 0.04969 194 122 50 22
567 Physical exam complete. Let's move on to the taste test. 1.4845 0.04749 194 118 58 18
568 The good news is, it’s not a break. You’ve just crumbled. 1.4845 0.04635 194 116 62 16
569 I'm afraid it's Gingervitis 1.4833 0.05012 180 111 51 18
570 We felt sure you'd crumble, but it turns out you are one tough cookie. 1.4833 0.05074 180 112 49 19
571 Unless you cough up some dough, we can't treat you. 1.4833 0.05135 180 113 47 20
572 So let me get this straight. You ran away from a little old woman, a little old man, a cow and a horse and it was after that when you felt the chest pain? 1.4821 0.04950 195 123 50 22
573 Your new heart is ready, we're just waiting for it to cool. 1.4821 0.04618 195 117 62 16
574 You'll be okay but, I'm sorry, your house didn't make it. 1.4821 0.05056 195 125 46 24
575 And one last question. Do you know the Muffin Man? 1.4819 0.05353 193 129 35 29
576 Increasing your milk intake will make you feel less crummy. 1.4817 0.04744 191 116 58 17
577 The procedure will only take about 12 minutes at 350 degrees Fahrenheit. 1.4817 0.04744 191 116 58 17
578 We were able to save you but your house is a goner. 1.4817 0.05081 191 122 46 23
579 Today we're moving you from ICU to the cafeteria! 1.4817 0.04686 191 115 60 16
580 In order to operate we’ll need more dough. 1.4817 0.05026 191 121 48 22
581 I would say, bake for another 10 minutes, then, call me in the morning. 1.4817 0.04916 191 119 52 20
582 As you can see, he is suffering from gingervitis. 1.4815 0.04721 189 114 59 16
583 …and I agree with them. Your sugar’s way too high. 1.4796 0.04823 196 122 54 20
584 Viagra is one idea, but for you the better treatment is yeast. 1.4794 0.04859 194 121 53 20
585 Your insurance doesn't cover a cooling rack. 1.4794 0.04859 194 121 53 20
586 Ginger Bed Man 1.4792 0.05114 192 124 44 24
587 As you can see, the patient has been severely battered. 1.4789 0.04583 190 113 63 14
588 ... And this, ladies and gentlemen, is how the cookie crumbles. 1.4789 0.04583 190 113 63 14
589 We're going to need to run a few more taste tests. 1.4789 0.05045 190 121 47 22
590 Your parents are here to see you. 1.4787 0.04915 188 117 52 19
591 Turns out we can catch him. 1.4787 0.04797 188 115 56 17
592 As of today, you're gluten free. 1.4787 0.04797 188 115 56 17
593 How about a coffee with us? 1.4787 0.04677 188 113 60 15
594 Bring us six glasses of milk—STAT! 1.4787 0.04738 188 114 58 16
595 We're baffled -- we followed package directions to the letter. 1.4787 0.04554 188 111 64 13
596 We couldn't get a perfect match, so we gave you a kidney from an animal cracker. 1.4778 0.05011 180 112 50 18
597 You were the only survivor, all the others crumbled. 1.4778 0.05073 180 113 48 19
598 I know this may be hard to hear, sir... but all of us have to one day meet our baker. 1.4778 0.05011 180 112 50 18
599 The good news is, you survived the holidays. 1.4773 0.04964 176 108 52 16
600 when you were admitted you were running a temperature of 350 degrees 1.4769 0.05002 195 125 47 23
601 He appears to be half baked. 1.4769 0.04841 195 122 53 20
602 I'm afraid it's time for you to meet your makers. 1.4764 0.05080 191 123 45 23
603 He's toast. 1.4762 0.04779 189 116 56 17
604 The good news is, you're delicious. 1.4762 0.05403 168 108 40 20
605 It says here your emergency contact is a Mister... Muffin Man? 1.4762 0.04837 189 117 54 18
606 There’s no way to sugarcoat this, it’s time to meet your makers. 1.4759 0.04933 187 117 51 19
607 I always start with the head. 1.4759 0.04815 187 115 55 17
608 We’re confident we got it all. You’re gluten-free. 1.4754 0.05188 183 118 43 22
609 He wants to be a ginger bread woman. 1.4751 0.05052 181 114 48 19
610 It's not serious. Just needs icing. 1.4734 0.04855 188 117 53 18
611 Your blood pressure is fine, but your molasses is through the roof. 1.4728 0.05108 184 118 45 21
612 We have a theory as to what's wrong but it's not fully baked yet. 1.4728 0.04991 184 116 49 19
613 He requested that his remains be taken with milk. 1.4728 0.04809 184 113 55 16
614 We only amputate when it's absolutely delicious...er, I mean necessary. 1.4725 0.04846 182 112 54 16
615 A 500 ml molasses drip and a weeks worth of tetracycline should bring him around, then we bake him at 350 degrees for 20 minutes. 1.4725 0.04719 182 110 58 14
616 The diagnosis is Gingervitis. 1.4725 0.05030 182 115 48 19
617 Tell us what happened after the oven door closed. 1.4722 0.05252 180 117 41 22
618 You’re going to have to cough up more dough if you want the procedure. 1.4722 0.05132 180 115 45 20
619 They've come to apologize for the first degree burns. 1.4722 0.05010 180 113 49 18
620 You'll be fine. Jenkins called the Five Second Rule. 1.4709 0.05063 189 122 45 22
621 If you die would you leave your body to catering? 1.4706 0.04631 187 113 60 14
622 What other symptoms do you have besides feeling crummy? 1.4706 0.04873 187 117 52 18
623 Does anyone recognize John Dough? 1.4706 0.04931 187 118 50 19
624 We believe the raisins can be safely removed. 1.4706 0.04813 187 116 54 17
625 It's seasonal 1.4703 0.05201 185 121 41 23
626 You have 3 weeks to live, or until the staff holiday party, whichever comes first. 1.4702 0.05200 168 106 45 17
627 Well....from the looks of him this should be a snap. 1.4702 0.04695 168 99 59 10
628 We did the best we could, considering what we had to work with. You might want to stay away from milk. 1.4699 0.04764 183 112 56 15
629 They forgot to set the timer. We had to admit you to the burn unit. 1.4699 0.05175 166 104 46 16
630 Stop complaining; we didn't give you fingers either. 1.4696 0.05110 181 116 45 20
631 He's well enough to eat. 1.4696 0.05287 181 119 39 23
632 His temperature last night was 325 degrees 1.4693 0.04707 179 108 58 13
633 The residents missed breakfast...we're going to have to amputate. 1.4686 0.05112 175 111 46 18
634 I’m afraid your prognosis is consumption. 1.4686 0.05424 175 116 36 23
635 You'll run again but never as fast as you can. 1.4686 0.05424 175 116 36 23
636 The consensus is: you're done. 1.4686 0.04916 175 108 52 15
637 Your lab results are a recipe for disaster. 1.4686 0.05544 175 118 32 25
638 Congratulations! you are now a gingerbread lady. 1.4674 0.05107 184 119 44 21
639 Your biopsy results were delicious. 1.4667 0.05130 180 116 44 20
640 The operation was a success! You are now gluten-free! 1.4663 0.05173 178 115 43 20
641 You have a severe burn and we have decided to start icing treatment. 1.4663 0.04790 178 109 55 14
642 The best we can do is ice the area and send you home. 1.4663 0.04856 178 110 53 15
643 Good news! The treatment was a success. You are gluten-free. 1.4655 0.05067 174 110 47 17
644 We can fix it, but it will take a lot of dough. 1.4655 0.05323 174 114 39 21
645 We can rule out a yeast infection. 1.4651 0.04765 172 104 56 12
646 Order an anti-depressant, he says all the spice is gone from his life. 1.4651 0.04765 172 104 56 12
647 I'm afraid we'll have to remove your gluten. 1.4651 0.05043 172 108 48 16
648 He's also presenting as soft and chewy on the inside, crispy on the outside. Anyone? 1.4651 0.04975 172 107 50 15
649 A little confectioners sugar and food coloring, and you’ll be a new man. 1.4651 0.04906 172 106 52 14
650 It's probably nothing, but we won't know for sure until we break off your arm and eat it. 1.4651 0.05241 172 111 42 19
651 I’m afraid you have a severe yeast infection. 1.4647 0.05153 170 108 45 17
652 We'll get you up and running in no time! 1.4647 0.04581 170 100 61 9
653 We're hoping you'll donate your body to culinary science. 1.4647 0.04946 170 105 51 14
654 Now, son, I'm not gonna sugar coat it... 1.4647 0.04875 170 104 53 13
655 Good news. The test results are back and you are completely gluten free. 1.4647 0.05286 170 110 41 19
656 We’ve brought in a team of specialists to flip you over to see if you’re done. 1.4647 0.04730 170 102 57 11
657 They're here to take samples. 1.4647 0.05220 170 109 43 18
658 This is one of those rare moments when being one tough cookie is actually a good thing. 1.4637 0.04771 179 110 55 14
659 Do you want to be rescessitated if you start to crumble? 1.4636 0.05380 151 95 42 14
660 Have you had any thoughts about donating your body for dessert? 1.4636 0.05851 151 101 30 20
661 And here we have an example of running a temperature of 375 f for 35 minutes. 1.4629 0.05045 175 111 47 17
662 It appears your temperature is 375 degrees. 1.4629 0.04913 175 109 51 15
663 The girl scouts send their best wishes. 1.4620 0.05130 171 109 45 17
664 At least he's not as nutty as that fruitcake in the other bed. 1.4615 0.05504 169 113 34 22
665 I'm afraid your prognosis is Grimm. 1.4615 0.05333 156 99 42 15
666 We are sorry Mr. Man but the days of running just as fast as you can are over. 1.4615 0.04894 169 104 52 13
667 I want you to meet your surgical team. 1.4611 0.04943 180 114 49 17
668 Whatever this is, he's convinced we can't catch it. 1.4611 0.05287 167 108 41 18
669 As you can see, he's suffering from a severe case of gingervitis. 1.4611 0.05422 167 110 37 20
670 They're concerned that your sugar's too high. 1.4611 0.04934 167 103 51 13
671 We’re recommending icing it. 1.4611 0.05149 167 106 45 16
672 I keep dreaming that I'm being eaten alive. 1.4611 0.05219 167 107 43 17
673 So you say you’re feeling crummy? 1.4611 0.04934 167 103 51 13
674 Your temperature was 350. 1.4611 0.05287 167 108 41 18
675 Was any part of your home produced in a facility that also handles wheat, milk, nuts, eggs, or soy? 1.4611 0.05007 167 104 49 14
676 Remember, when you are discharged you will need to sit on the counter and cool for 15 mins. 1.4611 0.04934 167 103 51 13
677 He seems to be crumbling. 1.4611 0.05287 167 108 41 18
678 Your prognosis is dim, but...that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.4610 0.05303 154 97 43 14
679 His blood sugar level is off the charts, but he is one tough cookie. 1.4610 0.05461 154 99 39 16
680 So. What's eating you? 1.4610 0.05538 154 100 37 17
681 The test results are conclusive. You're yummy. 1.4610 0.04887 154 92 53 9
682 Good news. We've found a donor with your icing type. 1.4610 0.05303 154 97 43 14
683 ...and this patient was the victim of a half-baked scheme 1.4610 0.05383 154 98 41 15
684 I hope you have your affairs in order, Mr. Mann. It's time to meet your baker. 1.4602 0.05276 176 116 39 21
685 You are now a gingerbread woman 1.4593 0.05430 172 115 35 22
686 I'm afraid there's no other way to say this: you're stale. 1.4589 0.05155 146 89 47 10
687 Can we get you some milk?? 1.4588 0.05150 170 109 44 17
688 It looks like a terminal case of gingervitis. 1.4583 0.05195 168 108 43 17
689 I can take the news Doc. No need to sugar coat it. 1.4583 0.05527 168 113 33 22
690 The team feels it’s your sugar level. 1.4583 0.05195 168 108 43 17
691 The good news is we were able to reattach your left leg. The bad news is you are now part pumpernickel. 1.4583 0.05056 168 106 47 15
692 Your formerly conjoined twin is also doing well. 1.4581 0.05277 155 98 43 14
693 You won’t feel a thing once the milk arrives. 1.4578 0.05027 166 104 48 14
694 Don't worry - we'll handle you very gingerly, man. 1.4576 0.04738 177 109 55 13
695 Would you mind showing us where you were dunked? 1.4573 0.05286 164 106 41 17
696 We have found a donor, but it turns out to be a house. 1.4573 0.05143 164 104 45 15
697 No more running as fast as you can 1.4573 0.05070 164 103 47 14
698 Your biopsy results indicate that you’re delicious. 1.4570 0.05617 151 99 35 17
699 We're trying to determine what caused your low sugar levels. 1.4570 0.05210 151 94 45 12
700 We think it's gingervitis 1.4570 0.05376 151 96 41 14
701 First-degree burn. Cookie-cutter case. 1.4570 0.05124 151 93 47 11
702 Examine him gingerly, he may snap. 1.4570 0.05458 151 97 39 15
703 Maybe gluten-free wasn't such a good idea. 1.4570 0.05458 151 97 39 15
704 We wish the news was better, but that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.4570 0.05210 151 94 45 12
705 No, they are not from the lab, but they still would like a sample. 1.4564 0.05083 149 91 48 10
706 He was admitted with a temperature of 450 degrees. 1.4563 0.05455 160 105 37 18
707 We used some extra strength frosting and were able to reattach it. 1.4561 0.04991 171 108 48 15
708 He suffered frosting bite on his lower extremities. 1.4561 0.04922 171 107 50 14
709 We won't know for sure until the taste tests are finished. 1.4545 0.04883 154 93 52 9
710 The good news is, you're not a vegetable. 1.4540 0.05586 163 110 32 21
711 The consensus is that, although you may think you are a tough cookie, you are merely half-baked. 1.4540 0.04861 163 100 52 11
712 We hear you're feeling pretty crummy. 1.4540 0.04861 163 100 52 11
713 We think it's gingervitis 1.4540 0.05586 163 110 32 21
714 We have decided to treat you gingerly. 1.4540 0.05449 163 108 36 19
715 The results are in: You're positively scrumptious. 1.4539 0.05557 141 90 38 13
716 Congratulations! You can see your new baby in 7-10 minutes. 1.4535 0.05104 172 111 44 17
717 Your baby was okay...in fact, delicious. 1.4534 0.05569 161 108 33 20
718 The good news is your tumors are raisins. 1.4534 0.05209 161 103 43 15
719 My professional opinion is that he will snap out of it. 1.4534 0.05134 161 102 45 14
720 It is the most advanced case of Hansel and Gretel syndrome that I have ever seen. 1.4533 0.05400 150 96 40 14
721 I'm afraid your sugar is a little high. 1.4533 0.05145 150 93 46 11
722 We are having trouble with your coverage, Cookie. Warm and chewy is a preexisting condition. 1.4533 0.05232 150 94 44 12
723 We can't complete the procedure without some more dough. 1.4533 0.05482 150 97 38 15
724 We have several theories, but they’re all half-baked. 1.4533 0.05232 150 94 44 12
725 It seems he can't rise. 1.4528 0.05180 159 101 44 14
726 You'll be up running as fast as you can in no time 1.4528 0.05102 159 100 46 13
727 My colleagues and I think it's a very aggressive form of Gingervitis. 1.4528 0.05331 159 103 40 16
728 the bad news is your glucose level is off the chart. 1.4528 0.05023 159 99 48 12
729 We only need a small crumb sample. 1.4528 0.05180 159 101 44 14
730 And you say no one has shown you a mirror since your procedure? 1.4528 0.05405 159 104 38 17
731 Your candy heart transplant will be much cheaper after February 14. 1.4528 0.05331 159 103 40 16
732 Actually in this case a temperature of 350° is perfectly normal. 1.4528 0.05102 159 100 46 13
733 On the bright side, your burns may keep you from being eaten. 1.4528 0.05102 159 100 46 13
734 I'm afraid it's seasonal. 1.4528 0.05023 159 99 48 12
735 He seems to have lost his spice for life. 1.4528 0.05023 159 99 48 12
736 The procedure was a success. You're completely gluten-free. 1.4528 0.05256 159 102 42 15
737 He says he doesn't identify as a gingerbread man anymore. 1.4528 0.05023 159 99 48 12
738 I'm sorry. You're healthcare plan excludes frosting. 1.4528 0.05331 159 103 40 16
739 I'm prescribing 3 tablespoons of baking soda daily, until you rise. 1.4528 0.05180 159 101 44 14
740 I'm recommending a culinary bypass. 1.4528 0.05331 159 103 40 16
741 We're concerned about your sugar levels. 1.4528 0.05331 159 103 40 16
742 I hate to the be the bearer of bad news, but this is the worst case of gingervitis we've ever seen. 1.4528 0.05762 159 109 28 22
743 I'm afraid your recovery will be as slow as molasses. 1.4528 0.04862 159 97 52 10
744 You're done. 1.4524 0.04981 168 106 48 14
745 Unfortunately, "surgery" was autcorrected to "sugary." 1.4522 0.05603 157 105 33 19
746 You look like you haven't been eaten in weeks. 1.4522 0.05380 157 102 39 16
747 Looks like gingervitis caught you. 1.4521 0.05591 146 95 36 15
748 We've consulted with each other but are reluctant to give you a cookie-cutter diagnosis. 1.4521 0.05505 146 94 38 14
749 They advise icing the fracture 1.4521 0.05331 146 92 42 12
750 We've applied heat, now it's time for icing. 1.4521 0.05058 146 89 48 9
751 You're getting much too old to run, run, as fast as you can. 1.4518 0.05095 166 106 45 15
752 Let me introduce Doctors Baker, Baker, Baker, Baker and Baker. 1.4518 0.05237 166 108 41 17
753 Our nutionists want to know if you are an organ donor 1.4512 0.04992 164 103 48 13
754 Shouldn't hurt at all. Just a routine taste test. 1.4512 0.05283 164 107 40 17
755 As your physician and staff, we want to assure you that your temperature of 350 is normal. Second: For God's sakes, Bob, your sugar levels are off the chart! 1.4506 0.05472 162 108 35 19
756 We're sorry to tell you your glucose levels are too high and you'll be gone by Christmas. 1.4503 0.05120 151 94 46 11
757 Unfortunately, the only transplant we have available is from an animal cracker. 1.4500 0.05155 160 102 44 14
758 Sir, it seems you have a severe case of gingervitis. 1.4487 0.05006 156 97 48 11
759 I'm putting you on complete bread rest. 1.4487 0.05088 156 98 46 12
760 This is my preliminary assessment, but I'm fairly certain that leaping from the oven was a contributing factor. 1.4487 0.05006 156 97 48 11
761 Well, they DID catch you. 1.4481 0.05296 154 99 41 14
762 We're worried about your sugar levels. 1.4481 0.05133 154 97 45 12
763 We can't find anything wrong with you. In fact, you're delicious! 1.4481 0.05375 154 100 39 15
764 Would you like to donate your organs to lunch - I mean science? 1.4481 0.05375 154 100 39 15
765 No, Sir, I’m afraid the Muffin Man is still unaccounted for. 1.4481 0.05531 154 102 35 17
766 To tell you the truth, I don't know how you lasted this long. 1.4481 0.05215 154 98 43 13
767 We can operate, but we'll need more dough 1.4481 0.05215 154 98 43 13
768 Good news, they've come up with an ingredient to extend your expiration date. 1.4481 0.05375 154 100 39 15
769 The bakers have said all you really need is 20 minutes at 325 and you'll be fine. 1.4481 0.05454 154 101 37 16
770 We advise that you don't run as fast as you can. 1.4481 0.05133 154 97 45 12
771 You are about to meet your maker. 1.4481 0.05296 154 99 41 14
772 For your transition to Chocolate Chip, we've called in these specialists in cosmetic bakery. 1.4481 0.05375 154 100 39 15
773 Our tests show you feel flat due to a lack of sodium bicarbonate. 1.4481 0.04879 154 94 51 9
774 ...and finally for the hair transplant, you've got two options: Sprinkles or strawberry laces? 1.4481 0.05375 154 100 39 15
775 If you like your baker, you can keep your baker. 1.4481 0.04965 154 95 49 10
776 Your temperature had spiked rather high for a while sir, but now that you've cooled down to room temperature, you're good to go. 1.4481 0.05296 154 99 41 14
777 This is not just some cookie cutter operation. 1.4481 0.04879 154 94 51 9
778 On the bright side, you're a cookie now 1.4481 0.05375 154 100 39 15
779 They're not interested in your symptoms, just your ingredients. 1.4481 0.04965 154 95 49 10
780 Now don't bite my head off, but these experts think your sugar level is too high. 1.4481 0.05296 154 99 41 14
781 Don't worry sir, it's just a routine procedure. And at 350 degrees it should only take 10 to 15 minutes. 1.4481 0.05133 154 97 45 12
782 You have a life expectancy of December 1.4481 0.05215 154 98 43 13
783 I think we’ve found the appropriate specialists for your condition. 1.4481 0.04965 154 95 49 10
784 We're going to try another 12 minutes at 375. 1.4479 0.04779 163 100 53 10
785 Sorry, but it looks like you only have until Christmas to live. 1.4476 0.05126 143 88 46 9
786 Since you're uninsured, treatment is going to cost you an arm and a leg. 1.4468 0.05367 141 89 41 11
787 Looks like a yeast infection. 1.4468 0.05271 141 88 43 10
788 His temperature is well over 350 degrees 1.4467 0.05141 150 94 45 11
789 And remember, no more run, run, as fast as you can for the next 10 to 12 weeks. 1.4467 0.05227 150 95 43 12
790 I hope you set aside some dough. 1.4467 0.05312 150 96 41 13
791 Here we have a John Dough. He can't remember who he is but was found running away from the White House. 1.4467 0.05396 150 97 39 14
792 Surprisingly it's not a yeast infection. 1.4467 0.05312 150 96 41 13
793 So you ran away fast. Is that the last thing you remember? 1.4465 0.05547 159 107 33 19
794 I don't want you to run, run as fast as you can for at least a month. 1.4465 0.05327 159 104 39 16
795 Well Hello Mr. G. What has been eating you? 1.4459 0.05143 157 100 44 13
796 Your sugar is way too high. 1.4459 0.05526 157 105 34 18
797 The good news is we caught you just in time. 1.4459 0.05222 157 101 42 14
798 Congratulations! We were able to scrap off the burned bits. 1.4459 0.04899 157 97 50 10
799 Worst case of gingervitis I've ever seen 1.4452 0.05653 155 105 31 19
800 I'm sorry to say, but he's been diagnosed with gingervitus 1.4452 0.05270 155 100 41 14
801 We're very relieved that you made it through the Holiday. 1.4452 0.05270 155 100 41 14
802 Apparently, running as fast as you can...wasn't fast enough. 1.4451 0.05488 164 111 33 20
803 We understand you're feeling crumby. 1.4444 0.05630 135 87 36 12
804 Great news. In just 25-40 min, we’ll frost you the gender you feel you were baked to be. 1.4437 0.05530 151 100 35 16
805 Are you prepared to meet your Makers? 1.4430 0.05424 158 105 36 17
806 Your sugar levels are low and we'd like to apply frosting. 1.4430 0.05118 158 101 44 13
807 I'm afraid you'll never run, run, as fast as you can again. 1.4430 0.05349 158 104 38 16
808 He's had a temperature of 350 degrees for the last ten minutes. 1.4430 0.05584 149 99 34 16
809 I knew he would pull through He's a tough cookie 1.4430 0.05419 149 97 38 14
810 ...and I’d suggest you stay away from milk... 1.4430 0.04798 149 90 52 7
811 We're just waiting for your temperature to come down. 1.4430 0.05249 149 95 42 12
812 We're going to handle your case gingerly. 1.4430 0.05335 149 96 40 13
813 We’re not sure. He just snapped. 1.4430 0.05584 149 99 34 16
814 I'm sorry. This is a gluten free hospital 1.4430 0.05162 149 94 44 11
815 They're here to take some ... uh ... samples. 1.4430 0.05335 149 96 40 13
816 I've brought in a team of specialists from the Keebler Institute. 1.4430 0.04983 149 92 48 9
817 They all agree: you’re half-baked. 1.4430 0.05335 149 96 40 13
818 I am sorry but your insurance ran out of dough. 1.4430 0.05744 149 101 30 18
819 Your legs will be sore for a while. Try icing them. 1.4430 0.05744 149 101 30 18
820 Since you can't feel your legs anyway we're going to give the children's wing a treat! 1.4430 0.05502 149 98 36 15
821 You've got a pretty nasty yeast infection. 1.4430 0.05419 149 97 38 14
822 Do you recognize your batterer? 1.4430 0.05162 149 94 44 11
823 Are these the "too many cooks" you were referring to? 1.4429 0.05669 140 92 34 14
824 Looks like sore feet. Have you tried icing them? 1.4422 0.05386 147 95 39 13
825 The test results are back— we may need to do some sugar coating. 1.4416 0.05450 154 102 36 16
826 No, you can't catch it. He's the gingerbread man. 1.4414 0.05612 145 96 34 15
827 Sorry to break the bad news, but you can no longer run as fast as you can! 1.4414 0.05349 145 93 40 12
828 I believe that your days of running, running as fast as you can have finally caught up with you. 1.4414 0.05259 145 92 42 11
829 This will cost you an arm and a leg. 1.4408 0.05341 152 99 39 14
830 We operate gingerly. 1.4408 0.05341 152 99 39 14
831 You’re getting stale and there is nothing we can do for you. 1.4400 0.05391 150 98 38 14
832 The good news is that my consultants and I have diagnosed you as being just a big gingerbread man. The bad news is that you are being transferred from the ER to the hospital cafeteria. 1.4400 0.05944 150 105 24 21
833 You have a nutmeg deficiency. 1.4400 0.05391 150 98 38 14
834 Our experts think it's a severe yeast infection. 1.4400 0.05391 150 98 38 14
835 The procedure should only take 15-20 minutes...at 325. 1.4400 0.05223 150 96 42 12
836 He slipped in the icing. 1.4400 0.05048 150 94 46 10
837 I’m afraid you only have until the end of December. 1.4400 0.05391 150 98 38 14
838 The prognosis looks Grimm. 1.4392 0.05358 148 96 39 13
839 Your sugar and fat levels are high, but we think you'll be able to run, run as fast you can. 1.4392 0.05691 148 100 31 17
840 You have a yeast infection. 1.4392 0.05609 148 99 33 16
841 You're the lone survivor. The others were dismembered and eaten alive. 1.4384 0.05496 146 96 36 14
842 We’d like you to consider donating your body to culinary science... 1.4384 0.05232 146 93 42 11
843 Treatment will cost an arm and a leg. 1.4384 0.05581 146 97 34 15
844 Chances are good that you'll be eaten before it becomes a problem. 1.4384 0.05048 146 91 46 9
845 Sorry, but that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.4379 0.05394 153 101 37 15
846 Prognosis is good -- he made it through the holidays 1.4379 0.05149 153 98 43 12
847 I regret to inform you that your sugar levels are too high 1.4379 0.05149 153 98 43 12
848 We have studied your case, and we'll need to approach it gingerly. 1.4379 0.05394 153 101 37 15
849 We’ve got to treat him gingerly. 1.4375 0.05637 144 96 33 15
850 Without insurance coverage, we’re afraid this is going to cost a lot of dough. 1.4375 0.05281 144 92 41 11
851 He keeps repeating, "Please don't bite my head off." 1.4375 0.05094 144 90 45 9
852 All we have is a half-baked theory. 1.4375 0.05807 144 98 29 17
853 Good news: we've found an exact icing donor match. 1.4375 0.04998 144 89 47 8
854 We know something's eating at you. That's the point. 1.4375 0.05462 144 94 37 13
855 I tasted his feet. He seems okay. 1.4375 0.05462 144 94 37 13
856 It’s our first known case of Gingervitis. 1.4375 0.05723 144 97 31 16
857 The gumdrop was benign. And delicious. 1.4375 0.05281 144 92 41 11
858 We promise to treat you gingerly. 1.4375 0.05281 144 92 41 11
859 I'm not going to sugarcoat it for you...your test results came back, delicious. 1.4371 0.05445 151 100 36 15
860 I'm afraid we couldn't save your house. 1.4362 0.05244 149 96 41 12
861 Turns out, it was just a yeast infection. 1.4362 0.05579 149 100 33 16
862 I'm afraid they've detected some blood in your sugar. 1.4362 0.05497 149 99 35 15
863 Your test results are back. It turns out you’re delicious. 1.4361 0.05582 133 86 36 11
864 We'd like to run a few taste tests. 1.4357 0.04884 140 85 49 6
865 Say, do you know the muffin man? 1.4357 0.05288 140 89 41 10
866 Two units of molasses STAT! 1.4357 0.05288 140 89 41 10
867 I've brought in the team that knows you best. 1.4354 0.05634 147 99 32 16
868 Professor Leary, I’m afraid you may have ingested a very powerful hallucinogenic. 1.4354 0.05634 147 99 32 16
869 Fortunately for you, these folks scraped together enough dough to get you well again. 1.4345 0.05606 145 97 33 15
870 The doctor will eat you now. 1.4345 0.05857 145 100 27 18
871 I'd like you to meet the transplant team. 1.4345 0.05162 145 92 43 10
872 It's a standard procedure sir. Totally cookie-cutter. 1.4342 0.05575 152 103 32 17
873 Never, ever run, run as fast as you can again. 1.4338 0.05291 136 86 41 9
874 The good news is you're perfectly fine. The bad news is that it's lunch. 1.4336 0.05663 143 96 32 15
875 Your test results indicate that you suffer from hypoglycemia, too much gluten, and your cholesterol levels are off the chart. I'm afraid there is nothing I can do, however, my colleagues think you're an excellent candidate for their program. 1.4336 0.05834 143 98 28 17
876 You still have a bit of a fever, but you smell delicious. 1.4328 0.05130 134 83 44 7
877 We're sorry---you're half-baked. 1.4326 0.05809 141 96 29 16
878 He's made a remarkable recovery. We thought he was toast. 1.4326 0.05541 141 93 35 13
879 Your blood-sugar level is off the charts. 1.4326 0.05355 141 91 39 11
880 They'll be advising me throughout the operation." 1.4326 0.05541 141 93 35 13
881 On second thought, let's examine this patient after lunch. 1.4326 0.05541 141 93 35 13
882 I'm afraid your running days are over, but if our treatment is successful, you could expect to have a normal shelf life. 1.4326 0.05809 141 96 29 16
883 We need to run some tastes, I mean tests. 1.4324 0.05604 148 100 32 16
884 Your ginger reassignment surgery was a success. 1.4324 0.05437 148 98 36 14
885 Well, the bad news is that you've past your best-before date. The good news is that no one wants to eat you now. 1.4317 0.05212 139 88 42 9
886 I’m afraid your condition is delicious. 1.4317 0.05504 139 91 36 12
887 What's he doing in the Burn Unit? 1.4317 0.05311 139 89 40 10
888 Sir, we’re going to have to move you, you’re making the other patients hungry. 1.4317 0.05690 139 93 32 14
889 I'll put this to you gingerly... 1.4317 0.05597 139 92 34 13
890 Too much ginger. You're lucky to be alive. 1.4317 0.05690 139 93 32 14
891 And these are the heroes who rebuilt your home after the accident 1.4317 0.05597 139 92 34 13
892 All our tests indicate that first you should be dunked gently into warm coffee... 1.4317 0.05597 139 92 34 13
893 Unfortunately the overexposure to milk did extensive damage to your lower half. 1.4317 0.05408 139 90 38 11
894 If the soreness continues just try icing it. 1.4317 0.05597 139 92 34 13
895 You’re gonna make it, Mr. Man. You’re one tough cookie. 1.4317 0.05690 139 93 32 14
896 After 10 minutes at 350 degrees, you're going to feel like a new man. 1.4317 0.05408 139 90 38 11
897 The good news is you aren’t sick. The bad news is you are large and delicious. 1.4317 0.05870 139 95 28 16
898 I’m sorry. You have to give us more to work with than “I’m feeling crummy”. 1.4317 0.05408 139 90 38 11
899 We believe your preliminary diagnosis was half-baked 1.4317 0.05008 139 86 46 7
900 A clear case of acute gingervitus 1.4317 0.05690 139 93 32 14
901 We've ruled out gingivitis. 1.4317 0.05212 139 88 42 9
902 You've been diagnosed as half-baked. 1.4317 0.05597 139 92 34 13
903 The fresh-baked smell will wear off in a few hours. 1.4317 0.05311 139 89 40 10
904 Don't worry, it's just a yeast infection 1.4317 0.05781 139 94 30 15
905 In this case, I think a cookie cutter approach is best. 1.4317 0.05504 139 91 36 12
906 We're here for a taste test. 1.4308 0.05975 130 88 28 14
907 Let me introduce your transplant team. 1.4286 0.05657 140 94 32 14
908 Mr. President, you are without a doubt the healthiest individual ever to serve in this office! 1.4286 0.05566 140 93 34 13
909 They found a cure, but it's going to cost you some dough. 1.4286 0.06113 126 86 26 14
910 Well, sir, these ARE the specialists. 1.4276 0.05164 152 99 41 12
911 Good news. The procedure was a success. You're now gluten free. 1.4275 0.05716 138 93 31 14
912 I'm sorry for the bad news but, that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.4275 0.05233 138 88 41 9
913 I regret to say that it is time to meet your creators 1.4265 0.05681 136 91 32 13
914 Can anyone suggest what's wrong with this patient? - and if I hear anyone say "gingervitis", I will ask them to leave. 1.4265 0.05585 136 90 34 12
915 I'm afraid your sugar levels are dangerously high 1.4265 0.05180 136 86 42 8
916 I'm afraid you have until Christmas. 1.4255 0.05348 141 92 38 11
917 He was admitted with a temperature of 450 degrees. 1.4254 0.05643 134 89 33 12
918 Sir, you've had a sugar rush. 1.4254 0.05643 134 89 33 12
919 Your gender reassignment was a success. You're now a gingerbread man. 1.4254 0.05934 134 92 27 15
920 You must stop asking the nurses to lick your icing. 1.4254 0.05441 134 87 37 10
921 I'm afraid we are going to have to amputate, we are getting hungry. 1.4254 0.05441 134 87 37 10
922 In seven weeks you will be able to run run as fast as you can. 1.4254 0.05230 134 85 41 8
923 You're looking much yummier today. 1.4254 0.05336 134 86 39 9
924 This is just my opinion, but you're only half-baked. 1.4254 0.05742 134 90 31 13
925 I have finished all my tests, but they just want to insert a needle to see if it comes out dry. 1.4254 0.05230 134 85 41 8
926 Ladies and gentlemen, we have here a case of extreme gingervitis. 1.4254 0.05839 134 91 29 14
927 Happy to say our team of specialists has more than doubled your shelf life. 1.4254 0.04782 134 81 49 4
928 It's unanimous it's a yeast infection! 1.4245 0.05683 139 94 31 14
929 Remember, its a fine line between pleasantly crisp and burn victim. 1.4234 0.05151 137 87 42 8
930 Good news is you've passed all of your medical tests. Bad news is we still need a taste test. 1.4228 0.06429 123 87 20 16
931 You've got to be careful even with a low-grade confection. 1.4222 0.05511 135 89 35 11
932 Guess they actually could catch you, gingerbread man. 1.4222 0.05511 135 89 35 11
933 Your insurance doesn't cover icing. 1.4222 0.05708 135 91 31 13
934 My colleagues were wondering if you would be willing to donate your organs a tad early. 1.4211 0.06058 133 93 24 16
935 I'm afraid we're going to have bite off that leg. 1.4206 0.05785 126 84 31 11
936 The results are in... You're delicious. 1.4203 0.05521 138 92 34 12
937 He looks half baked. I’d recommend another 30 minutes at 350. 1.4203 0.05709 138 94 30 14
938 Good news! We can fix you. According to our experts, you are only half baked. 1.4203 0.05019 138 87 44 7
939 They each had a hand in your creation, but you can only choose two to be on your birth certificate. 1.4198 0.05831 131 89 29 13
940 We're going to need to take a few samples... 1.4198 0.05730 131 88 31 12
941 We thought you were cooked but you snapped out of it. 1.4198 0.05626 131 87 33 11
942 These specialist all agree with me, you’re done. 1.4198 0.05626 131 87 33 11
943 I would recommend a course of sprinkles. 1.4198 0.05521 131 86 35 10
944 ...In layman's terms, he's going stale. 1.4198 0.04961 131 81 45 5
945 The procedure will be a snap. 1.4198 0.05521 131 86 35 10
946 I'd recommend another taste test--just as a precaution. 1.4198 0.05626 131 87 33 11
947 The hospital staff feels this team is better qualified to handle your sex change request. 1.4198 0.06126 131 92 23 16
948 Give it to me straight, doctor, do not sugar-coat it. 1.4198 0.05626 131 87 33 11
949 Tomorrow, with our help, you will no longer be a Gingerbread Woman trapped inside a Gingerbread Man's body. 1.4198 0.05626 131 87 33 11
950 He's got a severe case of candy corns and ginger-vitis 1.4198 0.05521 131 86 35 10
951 We're just going to run a few taste tests. 1.4198 0.05414 131 85 37 9
952 Bad news. You're tonight's dessert. 1.4198 0.05521 131 86 35 10
953 Don't worry, I'm making sure they all eat before the operation. 1.4198 0.05831 131 89 29 13
954 Our initial diagnosis is that you're quite yummy. 1.4198 0.05831 131 89 29 13
955 Despite the overcooking, your vitals are good and your frosting is intact. 1.4196 0.05003 143 91 44 8
956 His condition has deteriorated. He used to look good enough to eat. 1.4186 0.05687 129 86 32 11
957 We’re going to have to remove your gluten. 1.4186 0.05792 129 87 30 12
958 We all agree, if you don't get your stress under control, you're gonna snap. 1.4186 0.05469 129 84 36 9
959 We'll do the nose job, Mrs. Jones, but realistically you'll never be considered a hot cookie again. 1.4186 0.05792 129 87 30 12
960 Let me guess. Another yeast infection. 1.4186 0.05579 129 85 34 10
961 A little more 'self-raising' flour and you'll be up and about in no time. 1.4186 0.05687 129 86 32 11
962 He's using his own dough to settle the bill. 1.4186 0.05469 129 84 36 9
963 For how long have you been unable to run, run as fast as you can? 1.4186 0.05358 129 83 38 8
964 Damn it, Jim, I’m a doctor not a pastry chef! 1.4186 0.05896 129 88 28 13
965 If the operation isn't successful, would you consider donating your body to culinary science? 1.4186 0.05687 129 86 32 11
966 The surgery was a success. Your recovery time will be around 10 to 15 minutes at 350 degrees. 1.4186 0.05687 129 86 32 11
967 Please take note of Patient G, yet another dangerous case of mistaking baking powder for baking soda. 1.4186 0.05469 129 84 36 9
968 We'll have you up and running as fast as you can in no time. 1.4186 0.05896 129 88 28 13
969 Initial testing indicates a yeast infection and high sugar levels. 1.4186 0.05792 129 87 30 12
970 You're very lucky! All your buddies suffered major burns. 1.4186 0.05579 129 85 34 10
971 Graham and his team are here to consult on your sugar level. 1.4186 0.05358 129 83 38 8
972 Our tests show you have high levels of sugar and spice and everything nice. 1.4186 0.05792 129 87 30 12
973 Looks like 350 was just about perfect. 1.4186 0.05358 129 83 38 8
974 If you don't mind, they'll practice checking your doneness and texture. 1.4186 0.05579 129 85 34 10
975 Symptoms? "I just feel crumby." 1.4186 0.05579 129 85 34 10
976 You're lucky we caught you in time. 1.4179 0.05927 134 93 26 15
977 You suffer from insufficient baking soda. You'll never rise. 1.4173 0.05527 127 83 35 9
978 Good news! We found a donor with your frosting type. 1.4173 0.05296 127 81 39 7
979 Your blood sugar levels are far too high. 1.4173 0.05296 127 81 39 7
980 Your biopsy was delicious. 1.4173 0.05856 127 86 29 12
981 My team has concluded that you have a yeast infection. 1.4173 0.05583 139 94 32 13
982 Don't worry, the consensus opinion is that you are just dehydrogenated. 1.4173 0.05197 139 90 40 9
983 We’ll start with the head and work our way down. 1.4173 0.05489 139 93 34 12
984 I have heartening news: the Food Network is interested in your case. 1.4167 0.05488 132 87 35 10
985 We’ve narrowed it down to gluten. 1.4167 0.05796 132 90 29 13
986 Luckily, you ended up in a teaching bakery. 1.4167 0.05695 132 89 31 12
987 The entire medical team wanted to congratulate you on your successful reassignment surgery. You're no longer a ladyfinger. 1.4167 0.05796 132 90 29 13
988 Your nutmeg, cinnamon, ginger, ... they're all normal. But I'm afraid you have a serious clove deficiency. 1.4167 0.05162 132 84 41 7
989 Any other half-baked ideas? 1.4167 0.05488 132 87 35 10
990 Got milk? 1.4167 0.06182 132 94 21 17
991 We'll know if this is the Gingerbread Man once we lift this sheet. 1.4167 0.06088 132 93 23 16
992 We'd like to run some test on you, based on a half-baked theory. 1.4167 0.05695 132 89 31 12
993 Your plan would only cover the Keebler treatment. 1.4167 0.05796 132 90 29 13
994 You broke your leg? You should try ICING it. 1.4161 0.05348 137 90 37 10
995 Let this be a lesson; you didn't run as fast as you can 1.4154 0.05859 130 89 28 13
996 We won't know for sure until we run some taste tests. 1.4154 0.05652 130 87 32 11
997 Due to an unfortunate “incident”, the patient is here for a total foot replacement. 1.4154 0.05437 130 85 36 9
998 My advice is to run, run away as fast as you can. 1.4146 0.06101 123 85 25 13
999 Your test results came back delicious. 1.4143 0.05551 140 95 32 13
1000 So it's not D-O-E, but D-O-U-G-H? 1.4141 0.05820 128 87 29 12
1001 Preliminary test results indicate a yeast infection. 1.4141 0.05924 128 88 27 13
1002 Why don't we try icing it? 1.4141 0.05924 128 88 27 13
1003 The taste results show that your sugar levels are too high 1.4141 0.05493 128 84 35 9
1004 I'm afraid he's got a systemic yeast infection. 1.4141 0.05924 128 88 27 13
1005 The operation was a success--you are now 100% gluten free. 1.4135 0.05661 133 90 31 12
1006 The surgical team feels that adding a nose would make you appear cosmetically cluttered. 1.4135 0.05456 133 88 35 10
1007 Now that you mention it, I don't think we've tried icing it! 1.4135 0.05350 133 87 37 9
1008 My colleagues have conferred and recommend 350 degrees for another 5 minutes 1.4135 0.05456 133 88 35 10
1009 You have a temperature of 350 degrees. 1.4135 0.05661 133 90 31 12
1010 “Did you hear it snap?” He asked gingerly. 1.4127 0.05776 126 85 30 11
1011 The good news is, you've been deemed unfit for human consumption. 1.4127 0.05551 126 83 34 9
1012 He hasn't been the same since his wife went gluten-free 1.4127 0.05885 126 86 28 12
1013 Good news, you're not stale and in three bites you'll be out of here. 1.4127 0.05436 126 82 36 8
1014 They are specialists who will help me diagnose your confection. 1.4127 0.05551 126 83 34 9
1015 Don't worry. You'll be up and running in no time. 1.4127 0.05318 126 81 38 7
1016 His sugar is too high and he has no detectable pulse. 1.4127 0.05776 126 85 30 11
1017 The results are inconclusive. We're gonna need to run a few more taste tests. 1.4127 0.05551 126 83 34 9
1018 The tests show that you have a severe sugar imbalance. 1.4127 0.05776 126 85 30 11
1019 I'll come right out with it, you've got about 24 hours before you're stale. 1.4127 0.05436 126 82 36 8
1020 With your preservative content, you have nothing to worry about. 1.4127 0.05665 126 84 32 10
1021 I’m afraid you’ve been artificially sweetened. 1.4127 0.05551 126 83 34 9
1022 Well, run, run as fast as you can, You can't escape having no health care plan. 1.4127 0.05551 126 83 34 9
1023 You'll be able to run run run in no time. 1.4127 0.05992 126 87 26 13
1024 You're one sick cookie, I'm sorry to tell you. 1.4127 0.05992 126 87 26 13
1025 I'd stay away from dairy products if I were you. 1.4127 0.05665 126 84 32 10
1026 We are hopeful that a frosting match will be found for you. 1.4122 0.05618 131 88 32 11
1027 Don't sugar coat it; give it to me straight, Doc. 1.4122 0.05721 131 89 30 12
1028 We think you have gingivitis 1.4113 0.06168 124 87 23 14
1029 Your sugar is too high 1.4113 0.06061 124 86 25 13
1030 I'm sorry to tell you but there isn't enough dough left to finish the job. 1.4113 0.05493 124 81 35 8
1031 My colleagues agree, you're suffering from a severe case of gingervitis. 1.4113 0.06168 124 87 23 14
1032 In your case, a spoonful of sugar IS the medicine. 1.4113 0.05727 124 83 31 10
1033 Take a good look. Less than 2% of the population are natural gingers. 1.4113 0.05373 124 80 37 7
1034 Prepare to meet thy baker... 1.4113 0.05493 124 81 35 8
1035 And when you wake up you'll be Mrs. Gingerbread Man. 1.4113 0.05727 124 83 31 10
1036 The bad news is we ate your house. 1.4113 0.06168 124 87 23 14
1037 I am sorry to inform you that you will be stale in three days. 1.4113 0.05611 124 82 33 9
1038 So you feel crumby? 1.4113 0.05249 124 79 39 6
1039 We'll need to do some additional tasting in order to better diagnose what is wrong with you. 1.4109 0.05989 129 90 25 14
1040 Would you like to consider donating your organs to the cafeteria? 1.4109 0.06285 129 93 19 17
1041 We are sending you for some taste tests. 1.4109 0.05989 129 90 25 14
1042 They're here to make you batter. 1.4109 0.05570 129 86 33 10
1043 How about a nice cold glass of milk? 1.4109 0.05887 129 89 27 13
1044 He has a ‘do not recusitate’ order on file. I get dibs on the head. 1.4098 0.05303 122 78 38 6
1045 You only sustained minor injuries, but I'm afraid. . . BUUUURPPP. . . that your wife didn't make it. 1.4098 0.05429 122 79 36 7
1046 It says here that you've decided to donate your body for dessert. 1.4098 0.05907 122 83 28 11
1047 He presented with crispy edges, burnt lips and a temperature of 450 degrees. We will be admitting him to the burn ward. 1.4098 0.05673 122 81 32 9
1048 The good news is that this should't affect your taste. 1.4098 0.06021 122 84 26 12
1049 No more excuses. You are perfectly fine, and it's time to be glazed. 1.4098 0.05673 122 81 32 9
1050 You'll be out of here and edible in no time 1.4098 0.05907 122 83 28 11
1051 You say the stiffness started after being taken out of the jar? 1.4098 0.05673 122 81 32 9
1052 The CAT scan shows that you are only half baked. 1.4098 0.05791 122 82 30 10
1053 We haven't been able to get him to rise. 1.4098 0.05552 122 80 34 8
1054 The results are in... You're delicious. 1.4098 0.05429 122 79 36 7
1055 We're very sorry, but our mistake is going to cost you an arm and a leg. 1.4098 0.05791 122 82 30 10
1056 You should be up and about in 8 to 10 minutes. 1.4098 0.05552 122 80 34 8
1057 Well, yes, I did pledge to do no harm. Unfortunately, the kitchen staff did not. 1.4098 0.05552 122 80 34 8
1058 We’ll know more after the next round of taste tests. 1.4094 0.05629 127 85 32 10
1059 Well, the good news is that you’re 100% gluten-free... 1.4094 0.05953 127 88 26 13
1060 I'm sorry, Fred, Ginger didn't make it. 1.4094 0.05953 127 88 26 13
1061 Your levels of sugar and spice and everything nice are a little high. 1.4094 0.05953 127 88 26 13
1062 When we found him he was running a fever of 350°. 1.4080 0.05913 125 86 27 12
1063 The surgery was successful ... you'll be up and running again in no time! 1.4080 0.05576 125 83 33 9
1064 'Once your new leg cools, you'll be good as new." 1.4080 0.06021 125 87 25 13
1065 And no one ever told you you were allergic to brown sugar? 1.4078 0.05924 103 67 30 6
1066 Five more minutes in the oven and you were a goner 1.4077 0.05536 130 87 33 10
1067 I know you requested cinnamon drops, but your insurance would only cover frosting 1.4077 0.05951 130 91 25 14
1068 There’s no good way to say this, it’s turmeric! 1.4071 0.06488 113 80 20 13
1069 Good news, you're gluten free. 1.4065 0.05754 123 83 30 10
1070 We are ready to make you a penis, that is of course, provided you have the dough. 1.4065 0.06411 123 89 18 16
1071 Your medical history reads like a fairy tale. 1.4065 0.05637 123 82 32 9
1072 It's really a very simple procedure; we have a cookie cutter that's shaped like a woman. 1.4065 0.05868 123 84 28 11
1073 I'd like to discuss organ donation...you could help feed a family for months. 1.4065 0.05637 123 82 32 9
1074 Several of our staff would like tissue samples. 1.4065 0.05754 123 83 30 10
1075 We'd like to run a few taste tests. 1.4065 0.05868 123 84 28 11
1076 You'll not only walk again, you'll run as fast as you can. 1.4065 0.06411 123 89 18 16
1077 I'm afraid the sugar has spread. 1.4062 0.06119 128 91 22 15
1078 I understand your concern, but the pool of applicants who have attended both medical and culinary school is exceedingly white. 1.4062 0.05810 128 88 28 12
1079 It was touch and go for a while but turn out he’s really one tough cookie. 1.4054 0.06188 111 76 25 10
1080 These culinary students will be observing your procedure. 1.4050 0.05577 121 80 33 8
1081 The consultants suggest 350 degrees for 20 minutes. 1.4050 0.05818 121 82 29 10
1082 Well it appears you are allergic to Gluten 1.4050 0.05699 121 81 31 9
1083 Your blood sugar is out of control. 1.4050 0.06274 121 86 21 14
1084 It's a yeast infection. 1.4050 0.05699 121 81 31 9
1085 You'll be walking a little gingerly for a few weeks. 1.4050 0.05699 121 81 31 9
1086 You have a bad case of the sprinkles. 1.4035 0.05939 114 77 28 9
1087 You've been running a temperature of 350 degrees for 20 minutes. We're going to put you on a wire rack to cool you down. 1.4034 0.06351 119 85 20 14
1088 Another 10mins in that heat, and he would have been done. 1.4034 0.05638 119 79 32 8
1089 He’s one tough cookie. 1.4034 0.05763 119 80 30 9
1090 It appears you have contracted Gingervitis. 1.4034 0.05763 119 80 30 9
1091 What we have here is an example of severe Gingervitis. 1.4034 0.05763 119 80 30 9
1092 We've reviewed your tests and we agree that it's a sugar problem. 1.4034 0.05763 119 80 30 9
1093 I told them to touch you gingerly! 1.4034 0.05885 119 81 28 10
1094 I'm allowing your parents to take you home while you're still warm. 1.4034 0.05246 119 76 38 5
1095 Your results are good so far. Now for the taste test. 1.4034 0.05380 119 77 36 6
1096 Okay, you're scheduled for icing at 9 am, but you have to promise not to run away again. 1.4034 0.05510 119 78 34 7
1097 you're going to pull through although your back will always be on the dark side. 1.4034 0.05885 119 81 28 10
1098 Unfortunately, your stay will cost an arm and a leg. 1.4034 0.05638 119 79 32 8
1099 I regret to inform you, but it appears that you are half-baked. 1.4034 0.05763 119 80 30 9
1100 Cut to the chase. And no rhyming this time. 1.4034 0.06123 119 83 24 12
1101 We were wondering if you would willing to leave your body to us - I mean to science! 1.4034 0.05763 119 80 30 9
1102 I'm afraid you'll never run as fast as you can again. 1.4034 0.06005 119 82 26 11
1103 We've all decided you need a little more time in the oven. 1.4034 0.05380 119 77 36 6
1104 Our team of experts needs to take some samples from you. 1.4034 0.05380 119 77 36 6
1105 Tell them I can’t testify. I don’t know where my dough came from. 1.4034 0.06005 119 82 26 11
1106 I pronounce you gluten free 1.4034 0.05638 119 79 32 8
1107 You know, Humpty had it worse. 1.4034 0.05108 119 75 40 4
1108 Your prognosis is delicious. 1.4034 0.05380 119 77 36 6
1109 I’m afraid we’re going to have to sugarcoat this... 1.4034 0.05510 119 78 34 7
1110 Your have elevated glucose levels. 1.4034 0.05885 119 81 28 10
1111 You're very lucky, we weren't sure after Humpty Dumpty 1.4034 0.05380 119 77 36 6
1112 The good news is that you should be out of here by Christmas... 1.4034 0.05380 119 77 36 6
1113 Good news! The consensus is that you're just under baked. 1.4034 0.05638 119 79 32 8
1114 The term we like to use is"half baked." 1.4034 0.05380 119 77 36 6
1115 How long have you had the runs? 1.4034 0.05885 119 81 28 10
1116 I'm afraid you only have 12-15 minutes. 1.4034 0.05638 119 79 32 8
1117 The good news is that you're baked to perfection. . . 1.4034 0.05380 119 77 36 6
1118 Of course we'll do everything we can to save you -- why would you possibly think otherwise? 1.4034 0.06123 119 83 24 12
1119 We know you are a man, but a penis just wouldn’t be appropriate. 1.4034 0.05638 119 79 32 8
1120 He was beaten up by a ginger snap. 1.4034 0.05763 119 80 30 9
1121 You’ll be cooling for the next 10-20 minutes. 1.4034 0.05763 119 80 30 9
1122 Let’s try upping his spice. 1.4034 0.05638 119 79 32 8
1123 They feel you should walk now, but gingerly...... 1.4032 0.05830 124 85 28 11
1124 Totally routine. Just 8-10 minutes at 350°. 1.4017 0.05954 117 80 27 10
1125 You’re overweight so the fox drowned. But ... 1.4017 0.06656 117 86 15 16
1126 So, since that's all cleared up, these folks are going to move you into the cafeteria. 1.4017 0.05702 117 78 31 8
1127 we're afraid you may never run, run, as fast as you can again 1.4017 0.06315 117 83 21 13
1128 It's time for your taste test. 1.4017 0.06197 117 82 23 12
1129 He had a ginger ail 1.4017 0.05829 117 79 29 9
1130 This isn't my area of expertise, so I brought in a few specialists. 1.4017 0.06197 117 82 23 12
1131 He showed up in the ER half baked with elevated glucose levels 1.4017 0.05829 117 79 29 9
1132 They're here to check your temperature. 1.4017 0.05571 117 77 33 7
1133 It worked, Mr. Thompson. You're completely gluten free. 1.4017 0.05829 117 79 29 9
1134 I'm not going to sugar-coat your diagnosis. 1.4017 0.05829 117 79 29 9
1135 Yeast infection. 1.4017 0.05571 117 77 33 7
1136 You have worst yeast infection that we have seen in years. 1.4017 0.05954 117 80 27 10
1137 We may never catch you, but you have clearly caught something. 1.4017 0.06197 117 82 23 12
1138 I’ve ordered some taste tests. You look a bit underdone. 1.4017 0.05437 117 76 35 6
1139 I brought in some specialists. 1.4017 0.06077 117 81 25 11
1140 We'd like to use this as a teaching moment. A delicious teaching moment. 1.4017 0.05702 117 78 31 8
1141 Before we begin, are you willing to be a doughner? 1.4017 0.06077 117 81 25 11
1142 Test results indicate high levels of glucose. 1.4017 0.06077 117 81 25 11
1143 We all agree baking at 425° for 30 minutes should take care of things. Questions? 1.4016 0.05662 122 82 31 9
1144 We've located your original recipe---so your new heart won't be rejected. 1.4000 0.05964 120 83 26 11
1145 Don't worry. We'll have you up and running in no time. 1.4000 0.05496 115 75 34 6
1146 As we suspected, the sugar in your knee had molasstasized. We had to amputate and bake you a new leg. You can go home when you've cooled to room temperature. 1.4000 0.06195 120 85 22 13
1147 I’m afraid it’s a severe case of gingervitis. 1.4000 0.06483 110 78 20 12
1148 It doesn't look good—I'm afraid we'll have to masticate. 1.4000 0.06026 115 79 26 10
1149 He came in with some half-baked story about the injury occurring when he jumped out of an oven. 1.4000 0.05355 115 74 36 5
1150 They recommend fighting the urge to dunk yourself in milk. 1.4000 0.05902 125 87 26 12
1151 Fortunately we got him out of the oven just in time. 1.4000 0.05633 115 76 32 7
1152 We don't see this often, so I've decided to refer your case to a team of specialists. 1.4000 0.05076 120 76 40 4
1153 Your lab results arrived this morning and we all agree, they taste delicious. 1.4000 0.06081 120 84 24 12
1154 Our cafeteria staff is here to thank you for donating your body. 1.4000 0.05475 120 79 34 7
1155 Mr. Gingerbread Man, you have quite a bit of swelling in your right leg. These bakers are going to try icing it for you. 1.4000 0.05355 115 74 36 5
1156 Ready for your culinoscopy? 1.3984 0.05625 123 83 31 9
1157 I've called in a team of gastronomists. 1.3983 0.05534 118 78 33 7
1158 Unfortunately, that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3983 0.06035 118 82 25 11
1159 Your ginger levels are actually fine, but your nutmeg's a bit high. 1.3983 0.05914 118 81 27 10
1160 We have some bad news. Likely your head will go first. 1.3983 0.05914 118 81 27 10
1161 You have a temperature of 350 degrees. 1.3983 0.05790 118 80 29 9
1162 Our experts concur - you're terminally delicious. 1.3983 0.05914 118 81 27 10
1163 Do you wish to donate any body parts? 1.3981 0.06162 108 74 25 9
1164 Your condition requires we proceed somewhat gingerly. 1.3981 0.06666 103 73 19 11
1165 I’m afraid you have a temperature of 350 degrees. 1.3967 0.06263 121 87 20 14
1166 You've been cleared to go back into the oven. 1.3966 0.05595 116 77 32 7
1167 This ginger snapped. 1.3966 0.06465 116 84 18 14
1168 Can you share when you noticed you were allergic to ginger? 1.3966 0.05459 116 76 34 6
1169 We think you have a yeast infection. 1.3966 0.05983 116 80 26 10
1170 He says he’s just feeling crumby. 1.3966 0.05459 116 76 34 6
1171 We're here to do the taste tests. 1.3966 0.05983 116 80 26 10
1172 Nothing an enormous glass of milk can't cure. 1.3966 0.05320 116 75 36 5
1173 We knead more dough for your surgery. 1.3966 0.05983 116 80 26 10
1174 I'm sorry, but the outlook is crumby. 1.3966 0.05983 116 80 26 10
1175 The experts all agree - looks like gingervitis. 1.3966 0.06107 116 81 24 11
1176 Patient complains of feeling ‘slow as molasses.’ Chef Henderson, any thoughts? 1.3966 0.05595 116 77 32 7
1177 We'll have you up and running again in no time. 1.3966 0.05857 116 79 28 9
1178 Unfortunately, the prognosis is not good. I felt it was time for you to meet your makers. 1.3966 0.06107 116 81 24 11
1179 It doesn't look good fellas, his expiration date is next week 1.3966 0.05459 116 76 34 6
1180 The next stage of diagnosis is called the taste test. 1.3966 0.05857 116 79 28 9
1181 Consult recommends heavy icing. 1.3966 0.05595 116 77 32 7
1182 I had to call in some Specialists. 1.3966 0.05727 116 78 30 8
1183 I call dibs on the head. 1.3966 0.05983 116 80 26 10
1184 Apparently, he says he’s been feeling a bit crummy. 1.3966 0.05320 116 75 36 5
1185 It's acute gingervitis. 1.3966 0.05983 116 80 26 10
1186 They'll be taking small samples. 1.3966 0.05459 116 76 34 6
1187 This may come as a surprise but you are glucose intolerant. 1.3966 0.05727 116 78 30 8
1188 We've assembled our best chef residents to help treat your case of gingervitis 1.3966 0.05983 116 80 26 10
1189 It appears we caught you just in time. 1.3966 0.06107 116 81 24 11
1190 Mr. Ginger Bread is hypoglycemic. 1.3966 0.05459 116 76 34 6
1191 Word got around that you're an organ donor. 1.3966 0.05459 116 76 34 6
1192 So, you have a sore knee? Have you tried icing it? 1.3966 0.05727 116 78 30 8
1193 Since this is a teaching hospital, you can rest assured your surgery won’t cost both an arm and a leg. 1.3962 0.05947 106 71 28 7
1194 We're hoping we need to amputate. 1.3962 0.06096 106 72 26 8
1195 We all agree. Your problem is that you're half-baked. 1.3947 0.05793 114 77 29 8
1196 Here we have a case of "you are what you eat." 1.3947 0.06182 114 80 23 11
1197 We have good news. It was benign and delicious. 1.3947 0.06182 114 80 23 11
1198 You're quite lucky. Most rotations only see a couch potato or vegetable, but this is a rare case indeed. 1.3947 0.06182 114 80 23 11
1199 The good news is you ran as fast as you could. 1.3947 0.05658 114 76 31 7
1200 Here in the medical marijuana wing, our best patients are "Totally Baked". 1.3947 0.05793 114 77 29 8
1201 Do you have any questions about today's vanilla icing transplant? 1.3945 0.05684 109 72 31 6
1202 Nothing that a little vanilla icing can't fix 1.3932 0.05557 117 78 32 7
1203 Despite our best efforts, I'm afraid you only have a few days before you go stale. 1.3932 0.05816 117 80 28 9
1204 "A little baking powder and you should be up in no time". 1.3932 0.05942 117 81 26 10
1205 We need your expertise. This patient is one tough cookie. 1.3932 0.05688 117 79 30 8
1206 He’s one tough cookie. 1.3932 0.05942 117 81 26 10
1207 The bad news is that your sugar overdose may damage your pancreas. The good news is that you don't have a pancreas. 1.3932 0.05423 117 77 34 6
1208 I've assembled this team to give you a cinnamonoscopy. 1.3932 0.05816 117 80 28 9
1209 Are you a gumdrop donor? 1.3932 0.06185 117 83 22 12
1210 This is going to hurt alot less than that cookie cutter. 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1211 We're just hoping he can make it through Christmas. 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1212 When your temperature reaches 225 degrees you will begin to rise. 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1213 The operation was a success--you are now 100% gluten free. 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1214 On the upside, we were able to successfully bake your legs back on, unfortunately, on the downside, we've been informed that someone has apparently eaten your home. 1.3929 0.05723 112 75 30 7
1215 They do great reconstruction surgery with fondant these days. 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1216 In my opinion, he's done. 1.3929 0.05434 112 73 34 5
1217 I've called in some specialists who'd like to take a few samples. 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1218 I think i heard something snap. 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1219 We just need to make sure your temperature stays at 350 for the next 10-12 minutes. 1.3929 0.05723 112 75 30 7
1220 Your cholesterol's fine, but your sugar levels are too high; we'll have to remove those "buttons" tomorrow. 1.3929 0.06260 112 79 22 11
1221 You’re finally gluten-free. 1.3929 0.05580 112 74 32 6
1222 We can rebuild him, we have the flour. 1.3929 0.05723 112 75 30 7
1223 If I were you, I'd run, run, as fast as I can. 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1224 We think he snapped. 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1225 We'd like to run the giant glass of milk test. 1.3929 0.06260 112 79 22 11
1226 Mister Kookie, it seems you have a severe case of ginger-vitis. 1.3929 0.05580 112 74 32 6
1227 Looks like 300 degree burns. 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1228 My colleagues here are going to conduct some taste tests. 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1229 We have to repeat your procedure--they forgot to preheat. 1.3929 0.05580 112 74 32 6
1230 For your doctor-assisted suicide do you want regular or decaf? 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1231 We just need to run a few more tastes. 1.3929 0.05723 112 75 30 7
1232 It’s nothing a little frosting won’t fix. 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1233 You have the worst case of gingervitis we've ever seen 1.3929 0.06260 112 79 22 11
1234 We'd like to run some tastes. 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1235 I needed to bring in some consultants for your case. 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1236 It’s a quick, routine procedure, Mr. Man - 10 minutes at 350º. 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1237 We tested his reflexes and he is slow as molasses. 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1238 I recommend more icing. 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1239 Now, let's discuss why you are feeling crumby. 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1240 Your trans-ginger operation isn't covered by insurance." 1.3929 0.06260 112 79 22 11
1241 Not likely to make it past Christmas 1.3929 0.05284 112 72 36 4
1242 Unfortunately, all these years of running as fast as you can have taken their toll. 1.3929 0.06634 112 82 16 14
1243 You need to cut back on the sugar. 1.3929 0.05723 112 75 30 7
1244 I assure you, a temperature of 350 is quite normal. 1.3929 0.05580 112 74 32 6
1245 As you can see---the patient is doing much better than Mr. Dumpty in 312!! 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1246 We need to take some samples, um, I mean biopsies. 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1247 Good news, Mr Jones. The Specialists are here to pat you and prick you and mark you with a B. 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1248 More icing and less salt and you will be fine. 1.3929 0.05434 112 73 34 5
1249 I've never seen a case like this before, so I brought in a team of experts. 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1250 It is our considered opinion; that you're halfbaked. 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1251 But you identify as a gingerbread woman? 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1252 "Let's just say that after today, you shouldn't taunt anyone with 'You can't catch me!'". 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1253 Mr. Gingerbread — it’s not your heart we’re concerned about. It’s your nutmeg deficiency. 1.3929 0.05723 112 75 30 7
1254 I'm sorry to say this but you have a yeast infection. 1.3929 0.06260 112 79 22 11
1255 We caught you just in time. 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1256 You're suffering from a rare—and delicious—from of Gingervitis. 1.3929 0.05723 112 75 30 7
1257 It's been two days. Time for you to rise. 1.3929 0.05434 112 73 34 5
1258 We are all anxious to find out if you are leaving your body to science. 1.3929 0.06260 112 79 22 11
1259 The good news is that your condition is delicious. 1.3929 0.05434 112 73 34 5
1260 We think it was the cloves. 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1261 I wish I had better news about those bites. 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1262 You are medically cleared to run as fast as you can! 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1263 Our specialists feel your prognosis is... let me put this gingerly... 1.3929 0.05723 112 75 30 7
1264 I’m sorry, that’s just the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3929 0.06512 112 81 18 13
1265 They're from Doctors Without Larders. 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1266 He took too much medical marijuana and now he's fully baked. 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1267 The tests indicate that this is worse than a simple batter infection. 1.3929 0.06260 112 79 22 11
1268 Still feeling crummy? 1.3929 0.05997 112 77 26 9
1269 He's past his expiration date and severely dehydrated. 1.3929 0.05580 112 74 32 6
1270 I like to start with the head. 1.3929 0.05284 112 72 36 4
1271 His temperature was 350 degrees for 12 minutes. 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1272 I'm sorry to say the tests came back positive. You have gluten. 1.3929 0.06260 112 79 22 11
1273 I'm sorry but your insurance coverage expired on December 25th. 1.3929 0.05723 112 75 30 7
1274 We're just here to say, " Well done!" 1.3929 0.06130 112 78 24 10
1275 You're still running a temperature. We're going to put you back on a wire rack. 1.3929 0.05862 112 76 28 8
1276 He doesn't seem to remember anything after being placed on parchment. 1.3917 0.05833 120 83 27 10
1277 Don't worry the good news is we can bake you a new leg 1.3917 0.05332 120 79 35 6
1278 Test results indicate he is only half-baked. 1.3913 0.06382 115 83 19 13
1279 You can't catch it - he's the gingerbread man. 1.3909 0.05932 110 75 27 8
1280 You're in the Julia Child Wing of the hospital. 1.3909 0.06071 110 76 25 9
1281 This time tomorrow you'll be gluten-free! 1.3909 0.05932 110 75 27 8
1282 We got your results, and they're delicious. 1.3909 0.06071 110 76 25 9
1283 I can't figure out what's eating him. 1.3909 0.05644 110 73 31 6
1284 You're in good hands. Earlier today, they brought a collapsed soufflé back to life. 1.3909 0.05790 110 74 29 7
1285 I'm so sorry to deliver the bad news, but you're only half-baked. 1.3909 0.06470 110 79 19 12
1286 He came in running a fever of 375 degrees for 7 to 10 minutes. 1.3909 0.05790 110 74 29 7
1287 They're going to run a taste test. 1.3909 0.05790 110 74 29 7
1288 And here we have a cute case of gingervitis... 1.3909 0.06207 110 77 23 10
1289 I am sorry to say, you just can't run away from this. 1.3909 0.06340 110 78 21 11
1290 He suddenly just snapped. 1.3909 0.05790 110 74 29 7
1291 The patient reports remembering nothing before the holidays. 1.3909 0.05494 110 72 33 5
1292 I am sorry but our tests show you may contain nuts. 1.3909 0.05932 110 75 27 8
1293 My mistake, but they said they're the ones who made you, so I assumed they were family. 1.3909 0.06207 110 77 23 10
1294 So you feel crumby? 1.3909 0.05932 110 75 27 8
1295 We're pleased with your progress so far, but we need to treat you gingerly. 1.3909 0.05790 110 74 29 7
1296 You will once again be able to run, run, as fast as you can. 1.3909 0.05790 110 74 29 7
1297 I would run if I were you. 1.3909 0.06207 110 77 23 10
1298 Mayo Clinic deferred to this team of experts from Frosting Clinic. 1.3909 0.06207 110 77 23 10
1299 I'm afraid you have to cut out sugar and starch. 1.3909 0.06071 110 76 25 9
1300 The good news, your sugar levels are back to normal. The bad news... 1.3909 0.06340 110 78 21 11
1301 I'm afraid your heart rate is slower than molasses. 1.3909 0.05644 110 73 31 6
1302 Congratulations, you're gluten free! 1.3909 0.05644 110 73 31 6
1303 You're tests are back. Good news. No diabetes. Just a spoonful of sugar. 1.3909 0.06071 110 76 25 9
1304 The good news is we've found a surgical team for your gender reassignment... 1.3909 0.05932 110 75 27 8
1305 The good news is that we were able to reattach your leg with icing; the bad news is that you will no longer be able to run, run as fast as you can. 1.3898 0.05387 118 78 34 6
1306 Mr. Ginger, it's time to meet your makers. 1.3898 0.06141 118 84 22 12
1307 They think your story is half-baked. 1.3898 0.05520 118 79 32 7
1308 My colleagues and I are prescribing 15 minutes at 300 degrees. 1.3894 0.05683 113 76 30 7
1309 Lipids stable, sugar slightly elevated, otherwise you're delicious. 1.3894 0.05683 113 76 30 7
1310 You should have seen his house! 1.3894 0.05542 113 75 32 6
1311 My colleagues are interested in your stance concerning organ donation. 1.3894 0.05683 113 76 30 7
1312 Your tests show trace amounts of nutmeg. I'm afraid you're savory. 1.3894 0.05820 113 77 28 8
1313 I understand your concerns, but we really need these taste tests to be sure. 1.3894 0.05683 113 76 30 7
1314 he says he feels crummy 1.3889 0.06422 108 77 20 11
1315 In some ways, yes, very similar to organ donation 1.3889 0.06422 108 77 20 11
1316 We can extend your shelf life, but you might find the side effects distasteful. 1.3889 0.05556 108 71 32 5
1317 The bad news is you're allergic to dairy and flour. 1.3889 0.06005 108 74 26 8
1318 Am I correct that your remains are to be cremated at 375 degrees for 10-12 minutes? 1.3889 0.06147 108 75 24 9
1319 They’re here to remove your gluten. 1.3884 0.05551 121 82 31 8
1320 Your problem is you're just half-baked. 1.3884 0.05794 121 84 27 10
1321 We’re sorry to bring bad news, but that’s just the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3883 0.06206 103 71 24 8
1322 The biopsy indicates you're overcooked. 1.3879 0.05713 116 79 29 8
1323 Get me a glass of milk and I'll be ready to begin testing. 1.3874 0.05748 111 75 29 7
1324 I assure you this isn’t some half-baked new procedure. 1.3874 0.05889 111 76 27 8
1325 He said he was feeling crummy. 1.3874 0.05889 111 76 27 8
1326 We won't be using a gurney, but we do have an oversized cookie sheet. 1.3874 0.05748 111 75 29 7
1327 Unfortunately, we do not know the Muffin Man. 1.3868 0.05930 106 72 27 7
1328 Your left knee is a little chewed up, but that can be treated with a bit of icing. 1.3866 0.05860 119 83 26 10
1329 Frankly, it's a miracle you survived the season. 1.3866 0.06098 119 85 22 12
1330 Oh them? They all volunteered to test your samples. 1.3861 0.05965 101 68 27 6
1331 Well, if you roll it and pat it and mark it with a ‘B’ as often as you do, of course it’s going to get infected. 1.3860 0.06293 114 82 20 12
1332 You have run away from a little old woman. You have run away from a little old man. But you can’t run away from this. You need a hip replacement. 1.3853 0.05516 109 72 32 5
1333 It's like he's crumbling right before our eyes. 1.3853 0.06239 109 77 22 10
1334 I’m sorry, but we were unable to remove all of the gluten. 1.3853 0.06505 109 79 18 12
1335 We have you scheduled for coffee break tomorrow morning. 1.3853 0.05816 109 74 28 7
1336 As we suspected, the tests confirm you have gingerbitis. 1.3853 0.06101 109 76 24 9
1337 We removed the tumor. It was delicious. 1.3853 0.05516 109 72 32 5
1338 Good news is you responded well to 350° for 10 minutes. Bad news is we can now put you on Saturdays dessert menu. 1.3853 0.06101 109 76 24 9
1339 We project you'll lose your left arm and right leg - unfortunately that's the way the cookie crumbles 1.3853 0.05960 109 75 26 8
1340 You may have a yeast infection. Do you mind if my colleagues take some samples? 1.3853 0.05960 109 75 26 8
1341 Now this is a good example of a half-baked treatment. 1.3846 0.06158 104 72 24 8
1342 This man is a medical mystery. He’s been beaten, whisked, egged, flattened, plopped, pressed, rolled, cut, wrapped in plastic, cooled, and even heated to extreme temperatures. And we can’t find a thing wrong with him. 1.3839 0.06115 112 79 23 10
1343 His brown sugar levels are too high. 1.3839 0.05982 112 78 25 9
1344 My colleagues want to run some taste tests. 1.3838 0.06374 99 69 22 8
1345 We're concerned about your blood sugar levels. 1.3838 0.06042 99 67 26 6
1346 So if you don't make it, would you be willing to donate your body to Nabisco? 1.3833 0.05574 120 82 30 8
1347 Run, run, fast as you can, yes, but next year, get a flu shot. 1.3832 0.06178 107 75 23 9
1348 We've got the lab results. Your outlook is crummy. 1.3832 0.05578 107 71 31 5
1349 And we added in a free rhinoplasty... call it icing off the cake. 1.3832 0.05886 107 73 27 7
1350 They assure me your blood sugar level actually should be off the charts. 1.3832 0.05252 107 69 35 3
1351 Let’s ice it for now 1.3832 0.05578 107 71 31 5
1352 We need more tastes, I mean tests. 1.3832 0.06319 107 76 21 10
1353 The bad news is, you've suffered second-degree burns over 90 percent of your body. The good news is, it's nothing our specialists can't fix with a little icing. 1.3832 0.05886 107 73 27 7
1354 Do you know the muffin man ? 1.3832 0.06034 107 74 25 8
1355 The only thing your insurance will cover is icing it. 1.3832 0.05578 107 71 31 5
1356 His vital signs are stable but his caloric count is a recipe for disaster. 1.3830 0.06782 94 67 18 9
1357 Gingivitis 1.3830 0.06611 94 66 20 8
1358 It's just a sprain. A little icing and you'll be good as new. 1.3824 0.06080 102 70 25 7
1359 You had a 350 degree fever, but you're all better now. 1.3818 0.06325 110 79 20 11
1360 Well, we caught him. Now what? 1.3810 0.05958 105 72 26 7
1361 I can assure you this is the best vanilla extract team in the country. 1.3810 0.06258 105 74 22 9
1362 During the procedure we'll just be taking a little bite. 1.3810 0.06110 105 73 24 8
1363 We wholeheartedly recommend you stay away from milk. 1.3810 0.06402 105 75 20 10
1364 A few more minutes and he would have been too crisp to sit upright. 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1365 The procedure was a success. You're now gluten-free. 1.3810 0.05642 105 70 30 5
1366 The good news is you're gluten free. The bad news is you're allergic to ginger. 1.3810 0.05958 105 72 26 7
1367 I'm afraid an amputation will be necessary. Who wants the first bite? 1.3810 0.06402 105 75 20 10
1368 The team here at Baker's Memorial admit no liability regarding your gender neutral baking outcome. 1.3810 0.06258 105 74 22 9
1369 There were some complications during the icing process ... 1.3810 0.05642 105 70 30 5
1370 It is our consensus that you are under baked. 1.3810 0.05477 105 69 32 4
1371 Great news! We found a donor with your buttercream type. 1.3810 0.05642 105 70 30 5
1372 Well, a yeast infection seems out of the question. 1.3810 0.05958 105 72 26 7
1373 Unfortunately, the house was not built to code. 1.3810 0.06258 105 74 22 9
1374 So, how much ginger did you eat? 1.3810 0.05477 105 69 32 4
1375 My colleagues are going to bake you a cake as fast as they can. 1.3810 0.06258 105 74 22 9
1376 The tests indicate that your sugar level is too high. 1.3810 0.05958 105 72 26 7
1377 The patient can be difficult, but deep down he's really sweet. 1.3810 0.05308 105 68 34 3
1378 Well, now that we've baked in a new knee, you will be back to running in no time. 1.3810 0.05642 105 70 30 5
1379 In a few moments, we will begin preheating the exam room. 1.3810 0.05958 105 72 26 7
1380 We’ve identified the source of the problem: too many cooks in the kitchen. 1.3810 0.06402 105 75 20 10
1381 You've got a bun in the oven. 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1382 Acute burning sensations are pretty normal for a man like you. 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1383 Stiff joints are pretty common after coming out of tupperware. 1.3810 0.05958 105 72 26 7
1384 And here, my dear colleagues, is an extreme case of Gingervitis... 1.3810 0.06402 105 75 20 10
1385 Welcome to Cordon Bleu Cross Bleu Shield Hospital. 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1386 As you can see here on the X-Ray, that's the way the cookie crumbled 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1387 Your brown sugar count was low. 1.3810 0.06110 105 73 24 8
1388 Well done. 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1389 Family history please. When was your mother eaten? 1.3810 0.05642 105 70 30 5
1390 It's the worst case of ginger-vitis we've ever seen. 1.3810 0.06682 105 77 16 12
1391 We were wrong, you're not toast 1.3810 0.06110 105 73 24 8
1392 I regret to tell you that your insurance coverage stopped after 20 minutes at 350 degrees. 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1393 Oh, snap! 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1394 You've got a bun in the oven. 1.3810 0.05958 105 72 26 7
1395 I've assembled a team from the finest kitchens in the world and they assure me this case should be a snap. 1.3810 0.05958 105 72 26 7
1396 We're handing your case over to the kitchen staff. 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1397 We plan to treat him gingerly. 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1398 Sir, I've brought in some specialists to help with the diagnosis 1.3810 0.06402 105 75 20 10
1399 Your brown sugar levels are through the roof. 1.3810 0.06258 105 74 22 9
1400 350 degrees for 10 minutes with a glass of milk, and you'll be perfect. 1.3810 0.05958 105 72 26 7
1401 The test results show that you are hypertensive. And delicious! 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1402 First of all, it is never appropriate to refer to a patient as “Cookie." 1.3810 0.05642 105 70 30 5
1403 The procedure was successful, you can now bend at the waist. 1.3810 0.06110 105 73 24 8
1404 You had an intense 375 degree fever for 15 minutes but we were able to bring your temperature down. 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1405 You had a temperature of 400°. It should have been 350°. 1.3810 0.05477 105 69 32 4
1406 Unfortunately, with your insurance, the best we can do is a microwave. 1.3810 0.05642 105 70 30 5
1407 They all claim to be your father or mother. 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1408 We've brought in a team of specialists ... 1.3810 0.05802 105 71 28 6
1409 Great news. You're gluten-free! 1.3796 0.06131 108 76 23 9
1410 This is going to be hard to hear. Your recipe didn't call for ears. 1.3796 0.06270 108 77 21 10
1411 This is the most aggressive case of gingivitis I’ve ever seen. 1.3796 0.06672 108 80 15 13
1412 It's pretty much a cookie-cutter operation. 1.3796 0.06270 108 77 21 10
1413 Our diagnosis will require some further tasting ... oops, testing. 1.3786 0.06489 103 74 19 10
1414 "You're here because your ginger snapped." Shelley Rodgers Alexandria, VA 1.3786 0.06340 103 73 21 9
1415 Your Blood Pressure is fine but Sugar Count is really elevated. 1.3786 0.05873 103 70 27 6
1416 In your case I decided to consult with a few specialists. 1.3786 0.05873 103 70 27 6
1417 Your medical team is stumped on the diagnosis, so we've called in our kitchen staff to give it a try. 1.3786 0.06188 103 72 23 8
1418 We'll start the amputations with your left foot. 1.3786 0.05184 103 66 35 2
1419 Transgender? I thought you said that you were trans-ginger. 1.3786 0.06340 103 73 21 9
1420 The tests indicate a yeast infection. Rise and go. 1.3786 0.06340 103 73 21 9
1421 We may have bitten off more than we can chew. 1.3786 0.06188 103 72 23 8
1422 It appears you had really high sugar. 1.3786 0.06188 103 72 23 8
1423 We'll need a sample. Would you prefer left arm or right arm? 1.3786 0.06033 103 71 25 7
1424 Well for one, your gluten levels are off the charts! 1.3786 0.05873 103 70 27 6
1425 Sorry for referring to you on your chart as “some cookie”. 1.3786 0.06033 103 71 25 7
1426 Treat gingerly and plenty of bread rest before he can rise. 1.3786 0.05873 103 70 27 6
1427 Well, we've ruled out a yeast injection... 1.3786 0.06033 103 71 25 7
1428 We find no cookie cutter answer for your condition. 1.3786 0.05873 103 70 27 6
1429 Sorry Sir, but your insurance won't give us the dough to cover the procedure. 1.3786 0.06033 103 71 25 7
1430 I'm afraid the diagnosis is that you are half-baked. 1.3786 0.06033 103 71 25 7
1431 Surgery was successful. You are now gluten free. 1.3786 0.06188 103 72 23 8
1432 Now, in these types of dissections, I generally begin by removing a hand or foot, but when I was a much younger surgeon, I would start by aggressively taking off the whole head. 1.3786 0.05539 103 68 31 4
1433 We’re pleased to report that the operation was successful and you are now a Gingerbread Woman! 1.3786 0.05708 103 69 29 5
1434 We’re not sure how, but it appears his ginger snapped. 1.3786 0.06489 103 74 19 10
1435 You can’t catch measles. You’re the gingerbread man. 1.3786 0.06188 103 72 23 8
1436 We'll have you up and running away as fast as you can in no time. 1.3786 0.05873 103 70 27 6
1437 Let's start with when you were just a piece of dough. 1.3786 0.06188 103 72 23 8
1438 The bakers are here to make you anatomically correct 1.3786 0.06033 103 71 25 7
1439 Sure, he smells great. But two minutes more, and we'd all be looking at him in the burn victims unit. 1.3786 0.05708 103 69 29 5
1440 You OD'd on baking soda. 1.3786 0.06188 103 72 23 8
1441 All scans and workups so far remain inconclusive, so I brought in a new team to try a taste test. 1.3786 0.05708 103 69 29 5
1442 Can too catch you. 1.3784 0.06010 111 78 24 9
1443 While somewhat unorthodox, I've asked a number of local bakers to consult on your condition. 1.3776 0.06570 98 70 19 9
1444 How did you feel when you came out of the oven? 1.3774 0.05912 106 73 26 7
1445 Our diagnosis is that you're delicious. 1.3774 0.06062 106 74 24 8
1446 It's clear that we need to get your temperature back up to 350 degrees. 1.3774 0.05758 106 72 28 6
1447 We'll begin the taste test as soon as he goes under. 1.3774 0.05600 106 71 30 5
1448 Mr. Cookie, your insurance refused to cover treatment for your high blood sugar level -- a pre-existing condition. 1.3774 0.05758 106 72 28 6
1449 The good news is, you're delicious. 1.3774 0.05437 106 70 32 4
1450 Looks like a case of edible complex. 1.3774 0.06209 106 75 22 9
1451 You should stop running as fast as you can. 1.3774 0.06209 106 75 22 9
1452 I know, I know. You run, run as fast as you can. But with all that sugar and cholesterol in your system you were bound to end up here.” 1.3774 0.05758 106 72 28 6
1453 Like many residents of Candyland, it seems that you've developed diabetes. 1.3763 0.06099 93 63 25 5
1454 Diabetes finally caught him. 1.3762 0.05946 101 69 26 6
1455 Initial test results indicate that he is not running as fast as he can. 1.3762 0.06110 101 70 24 7
1456 We suggest you move about very gingerly at first. 1.3761 0.06084 109 77 23 9
1457 We're sure you'll be happy to know that your gluten is in remission. 1.3761 0.05798 109 75 27 7
1458 I'm afraid I can't sugar coat this... 1.3761 0.05798 109 75 27 7
1459 They want you iced. 1.3761 0.05650 109 74 29 6
1460 We've all concurred, and are quite sure you have a yeast infection. 1.3761 0.05650 109 74 29 6
1461 I'm afraid even you can't outrun diabetes. 1.3761 0.05498 109 73 31 5
1462 The patient is male, approximately 45 minutes old, and presents with a fear of people trying to catch him. 1.3750 0.05985 104 72 25 7
1463 His sugar levels are way too high. 1.3750 0.06436 104 75 19 10
1464 My colleagues all agree: orange skin - check; gooey eyes - check; cherry button tie - check. But smarter than a fox? I’m sorry Mr President… 1.3750 0.06290 104 74 21 9
1465 “We hear you are thinking about becoming transgingered”. 1.3750 0.06139 104 73 23 8
1466 This is not your typical "cookie cutter" case. 1.3750 0.06290 104 74 21 9
1467 No, it won’t be as hot and painful as when you were born. 1.3750 0.05665 104 70 29 5
1468 The good news is you're gluten-free! 1.3750 0.05985 104 72 25 7
1469 This team of the world's leading experts on your condition has offered their unanimous recommendation of a 350-degree oven for 12 to 18 minutes. 1.3750 0.05498 104 69 31 4
1470 Your scans reveal a soft center, crisp edges, and a high amount of spice. 1.3750 0.05325 104 68 33 3
1471 This is not your basic cookie cutter operation - we'll treat this one more gingerly. 1.3750 0.06436 104 75 19 10
1472 You have to cut down on your carbs. 1.3750 0.06290 104 74 21 9
1473 We’re sorry...the icing was not a match. 1.3750 0.06290 104 74 21 9
1474 He's in to get his gluten removed. 1.3750 0.05985 104 72 25 7
1475 Interesting case. We never thought he'd make it past Christmas... 1.3750 0.05827 104 71 27 6
1476 The paternity test results came back--definitely the Pillsbury doughboy. 1.3750 0.06290 104 74 21 9
1477 The good news: you're no longer gender specific AND you're now gluten free. 1.3750 0.05985 104 72 25 7
1478 Patient is an edible man and presents with a soft center, crisp on the edges, perfectly spiced. 1.3750 0.06139 104 73 23 8
1479 The paramedics found him in a 575 degree oven on an ungreased sheet. 1.3750 0.06139 104 73 23 8
1480 Unfortunately, you will no longer be able to run as fast as you can. 1.3750 0.06139 104 73 23 8
1481 Go easy on the ginger and you'll be fine. 1.3750 0.05827 104 71 27 6
1482 Yes, it's a sore knee! We'll try icing it for a few days! 1.3738 0.06161 107 76 22 9
1483 He’s looking awfully pastry. 1.3737 0.06354 99 70 21 8
1484 This is the worst case of gingivitis we have ever seen. 1.3727 0.06038 110 78 23 9
1485 Surprisingly, we cannot take the cookie-cutter approach to your case. 1.3727 0.05756 110 76 27 7
1486 Your new liver should be done in around 45 minutes. 1.3727 0.06038 110 78 23 9
1487 First, we'll be preheating the operating room to 350 degrees. 1.3725 0.05899 102 70 26 6
1488 We recommend another two minutes at 350 degrees, but it's up to you. 1.3725 0.05560 102 68 30 4
1489 I recommend rest--and icing. 1.3725 0.05899 102 70 26 6
1490 Don’t worry Mr. Brown, the Candyman can. 1.3725 0.06061 102 71 24 7
1491 Mind if we take an x-ray? Seems my spatula has gone missing after your surgery. 1.3725 0.06219 102 72 22 8
1492 Well the oven didn’t bring his color back. Let’s try the microwave 1.3725 0.06373 102 73 20 9
1493 They've ruled out measles but recommend a biopsy--actually, five biopsies. 1.3725 0.06524 102 74 18 10
1494 They are all experts in Culinary Medicine. 1.3725 0.06219 102 72 22 8
1495 He says he wants to be a Spice Girl 1.3725 0.06219 102 72 22 8
1496 And now about that yeast infection. 1.3725 0.05560 102 68 30 4
1497 We promise to treat you gingerly. 1.3725 0.05899 102 70 26 6
1498 His only symptom is that he's as slow as molasses. 1.3725 0.05560 102 68 30 4
1499 I assure you the operation will be a piece of cake. 1.3725 0.05732 102 69 28 5
1500 DO YOU HAVE ANY RECOLLECTION AT ALL OF BEING THROWN INTO A HOT OVEN? 1.3725 0.05732 102 69 28 5
1501 We need to treat him very gingerly... 1.3725 0.06219 102 72 22 8
1502 Your results are in. There's nothing to worry about. You are perfectly edible. 1.3725 0.06373 102 73 20 9
1503 You need to understand that some of your patients will be burn victims. 1.3725 0.05382 102 67 32 3
1504 Of course, all of this could have been avoided, had you not been so averse to taking preservatives. 1.3725 0.05382 102 67 32 3
1505 The operation should be done in 7 to 10 minutes. 1.3725 0.06219 102 72 22 8
1506 Before surgery, I want to remind you the donor form is completely voluntary. 1.3725 0.05560 102 68 30 4
1507 Don't worry, we're not going to bite your head off! Just a few tests... 1.3725 0.06061 102 71 24 7
1508 There are some things you just can't outrun. 1.3725 0.06061 102 71 24 7
1509 I'm afraid it's a yeast infection. 1.3725 0.06061 102 71 24 7
1510 Congratulations! Your lab results show you’re 100% gluten-free. 1.3725 0.06061 102 71 24 7
1511 The taste tests all came back “delicious”! 1.3725 0.06219 102 72 22 8
1512 The results are in, and we're happy to report that you are gluten free. 1.3725 0.06061 102 71 24 7
1513 The good news is that you are recovering nicely from the assault by Mr. Fox. Unfortunately, with P.S. 128’s third grade class coming to tour the hospital, your life expectancy is roughly 87 minutes. 1.3725 0.06373 102 73 20 9
1514 The surgery was a success! You're officially Trans-ginger. 1.3725 0.06671 102 75 16 11
1515 Admittedly, our first diagnosis was a little half-baked. 1.3725 0.05560 102 68 30 4
1516 When we find a matching milk donor, we can proceed. 1.3725 0.05382 102 67 32 3
1517 But if anything should go wrong, we ask that you consider leaving your body to culinary science. 1.3725 0.06373 102 73 20 9
1518 You should see what we did to the Nutcracker. 1.3725 0.06219 102 72 22 8
1519 You're going to be 'OK.' They say the fire started when a candle got too close to the gum drop chimney. 1.3725 0.05899 102 70 26 6
1520 Here we have a typical case of a high sugar diet. 1.3725 0.05899 102 70 26 6
1521 With any luck, when you wake up your feet will be facing sideways. 1.3725 0.05899 102 70 26 6
1522 As suspected, its gingivitis. 1.3725 0.05899 102 70 26 6
1523 You passed the cognitive test but don’t be surprised if the press wants to bite your head off. 1.3725 0.05732 102 69 28 5
1524 His chart says he self identifies as a "Pumpkin Spice" man, and his pronouns are he, his and him. Yes, she's a transginger. 1.3725 0.06373 102 73 20 9
1525 Too much ginger. Not enough snap. 1.3725 0.06219 102 72 22 8
1526 No doubt about it, the Pillsbury Dough Boy gave him a yeast infection. 1.3725 0.06373 102 73 20 9
1527 It's simple really; a cookie cutter operation. 1.3725 0.05899 102 70 26 6
1528 He's running a temperature of 350 degrees. 1.3725 0.06219 102 72 22 8
1529 Turns out it is dyslexia. Chef Otto read "Bake 375 minutes at 10 degrees". 1.3725 0.06219 102 72 22 8
1530 3rd degree burns from a holiday bake-off. 1.3723 0.06047 94 64 25 5
1531 Once you recover from knee surgery, you can run, run as fast as you can! 1.3714 0.06240 105 75 21 9
1532 His tests show he's low on cinnamon 1.3714 0.05783 105 72 27 6
1533 Patient is presenting with a yeast infection and fatigue upon rising. 1.3714 0.06527 105 77 17 11
1534 Sorry, but that’s how the cookie crumbles. 1.3714 0.05939 105 73 25 7
1535 They'd like to know if you'll consent to be a donor. 1.3714 0.06091 105 74 23 8
1536 We have no idea why you taste like ravioli. 1.3714 0.06091 105 74 23 8
1537 We've received your test results, and four out of five chefs agree that you look delicious. 1.3714 0.05622 105 71 29 5
1538 We are sorry to inform you but our tests indicate you are stale. 1.3700 0.05972 100 69 25 6
1539 This is one sick cookie! 1.3700 0.06460 100 72 19 9
1540 Okay, we’ll run, run the tests as fast as we can. 1.3700 0.05972 100 69 25 6
1541 Our tests indicate you'll rise soon. 1.3700 0.05972 100 69 25 6
1542 We stand by our diagnosis. You’re half baked. 1.3700 0.06139 100 70 23 7
1543 We are going to administer a milk IV... and then come back and check on you about lunchtime. 1.3690 0.06938 84 60 17 7
1544 Good news- we got the tumor. Bad news- we left in a spatula. 1.3689 0.06470 103 75 18 10
1545 Sorry to wake you, Mr. Ginger, but we’ll need you to provide a few more samples. 1.3689 0.06321 103 74 20 9
1546 The butchers and candlestick makers send their regards. 1.3689 0.06321 103 74 20 9
1547 Your baking soda level seems high. 1.3689 0.05852 103 71 26 6
1548 His blood sugar is off the chart. 1.3689 0.06169 103 73 22 8
1549 Your MRI results reveal you're yummy. 1.3689 0.05852 103 71 26 6
1550 Twenty more minutes at 400 F and you will be fine. 1.3689 0.06013 103 72 24 7
1551 Their theory is that an injection of yeast can get a rise out of you. 1.3689 0.06470 103 75 18 10
1552 Your blood sugar levels are delicious. 1.3689 0.06013 103 72 24 7
1553 So the insurance provider said, "No coverage." I'm afraid that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3689 0.05852 103 71 26 6
1554 Well, we've ruled out a yeast injection... 1.3679 0.06190 106 76 21 9
1555 They believe the reason you're so lethargic is that they put in a bit too much molasses. 1.3679 0.05893 106 74 25 7
1556 Now that the holidays are over, his life-expectancy has increased dramatically. 1.3679 0.05738 106 73 27 6
1557 Good news -- we've found a suitable raisin transplant. The bad news is we have to get your sugar level under control first. 1.3673 0.06220 98 69 22 7
1558 According to our hospital's standard of care, we normally remove the legs first, then the arms. 1.3673 0.06220 98 69 22 7
1559 Good news, no one's going to eat you. Bad news, you're critically stale. 1.3673 0.06220 98 69 22 7
1560 Don't worry, we have the best raisin transplant team in the nation. 1.3673 0.05690 98 66 28 4
1561 This is typical of graham positive infection. 1.3673 0.06387 98 70 20 8
1562 Cut back on the sweets, and run, run as fast as you can. 1.3673 0.05690 98 66 28 4
1563 Actually, I wish we had more patients like you. 1.3673 0.05872 98 67 26 5
1564 Do you have a family history of baking powder abuse? 1.3673 0.06708 98 72 16 10
1565 It's a simple case of old age. It's February and not only are you out of season but your stale and chewy. 1.3673 0.05872 98 67 26 5
1566 OK. We want you to get up and run, run as fast as you can. 1.3673 0.06048 98 68 24 6
1567 We're going to have to run a series of taste tests. 1.3673 0.05872 98 67 26 5
1568 Avoid running as fast as you can and call us in the morning. 1.3673 0.06387 98 70 20 8
1569 The good news is the operation was a success. The bad news is they sent you to catering instead of surgery. 1.3673 0.05872 98 67 26 5
1570 I'm afraid we'll have to remove your gluten. 1.3667 0.06601 90 64 19 7
1571 We'll have to treat him gingerly 1.3663 0.05924 101 70 25 6
1572 I'm not going to sugar coat it. Your prognosis is crummy, so we're going to be moving you to the dessert cart. 1.3663 0.05580 101 68 29 4
1573 Your sugar levels are high and you'll need a button bypass. 1.3663 0.05924 101 70 25 6
1574 Good news with a little physical therapy you should again be able to run, run as fast as you can. 1.3663 0.06089 101 71 23 7
1575 My colleagues and I agree that your cinnamon levels are much to high. 1.3663 0.05755 101 69 27 5
1576 The bad news is you have ginger deficiency. The good news is you can donate your crumbs to save dozens of desserts. 1.3663 0.06406 101 73 19 9
1577 We're going to have to postpone your addadicktome surgery. Somebody bit off more than they could chew! 1.3656 0.06074 93 64 24 5
1578 We think you're going to like what we did with your private parts! 1.3656 0.06074 93 64 24 5
1579 Don't worry, they're just gonna take a few samples. 1.3654 0.06120 104 74 22 8
1580 I recommend a molasses drip, stat. 1.3646 0.05946 96 66 25 5
1581 This patient has been diagnosed with a severe case of gingervitis. 1.3646 0.06127 96 67 23 6
1582 He has a temperature of 350 degrees! 1.3646 0.06127 96 67 23 6
1583 Our team of specialists agrees that 8 more minutes at 350 degrees will cure what ails you. 1.3646 0.06475 96 69 19 8
1584 Run away, run away, as fast as you can. 1.3646 0.05946 96 66 25 5
1585 Sorry but you have no medical coverage. Betty Crocker and Duncan Hines have both dropped out of healthcare.gov 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1586 So far, all of our solutions to your gluten allergy are half-baked. 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1587 Looks like a third degree burn, but only on the bottom. 1.3646 0.06475 96 69 19 8
1588 The consensus is, you need to go back in the oven for a few more minutes. 1.3646 0.06475 96 69 19 8
1589 The good news is that you are not diabetic--we found no blood in your sugar 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1590 He's presenting with a severe case of gingervitis. 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1591 Indications are that you can now lead a normal life, just avoid your friends when they're hungry. 1.3646 0.05946 96 66 25 5
1592 The experts agree. Your sugar levels are off the charts! 1.3646 0.05946 96 66 25 5
1593 Our Specialists agree that you will probably snap out of it 1.3646 0.06642 96 70 17 9
1594 "I'll discharge you if you insist, but I must advise you not to run as fast as you can for at least a couple of weeks. 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1595 The tests came back and we’re happy to say you’re gluten-free! 1.3646 0.05946 96 66 25 5
1596 We realize you are only half baked, Mr. Gingerbread, but your insurance plan does not cover the complete baking procedure. 1.3646 0.06642 96 70 17 9
1597 There's nothing we can do for him. He's done. 1.3646 0.05946 96 66 25 5
1598 The X-ray confirms it's a bite. 1.3646 0.06806 96 71 15 10
1599 Congratulations the Re-bake went well your officially a Gingerbread women. 1.3646 0.06475 96 69 19 8
1600 Um, guys, his chart says GENDER reassignment. 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1601 It's not a glandular problem. There were just too many cooks. 1.3646 0.06475 96 69 19 8
1602 Running too fast has caught up with you. 1.3646 0.05946 96 66 25 5
1603 And if you don't follow these recommendations, well, that's how the cookie crumbles. 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1604 Are you a donor? 1.3646 0.05758 96 65 27 4
1605 The time has come for you to meet your maker. 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1606 His sugar level is off the charts! 1.3646 0.06127 96 67 23 6
1607 I am very sorry Mr. Breadman but it wasn't clear in your notes that "Becoming Ginger Breadman" meant a gender confirmation procedure. 1.3646 0.06642 96 70 17 9
1608 Yes, that's right, we'll need to take a bite to check your blood sugar. 1.3646 0.05758 96 65 27 4
1609 We’re going to try icing the injury. 1.3646 0.06127 96 67 23 6
1610 And, how long has this yeast infection been bothering you? 1.3646 0.06127 96 67 23 6
1611 I have consulted with my colleagues. Looks like we need to remove your gluten. 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1612 Now here's a serious yeast infection. 1.3646 0.06127 96 67 23 6
1613 You're going to be fine. The rest of your family, I'm afraid, were delicious. 1.3646 0.05946 96 66 25 5
1614 He wants to be Ginger Rogers. 1.3646 0.06642 96 70 17 9
1615 Sorry, the news is not good. There were just too many cooks in the kitchen. 1.3646 0.06475 96 69 19 8
1616 By this time tomorrow you will have a big smile on your face and will no longer be referred to as the Gingerbread Man! 1.3646 0.06127 96 67 23 6
1617 Congratulations! You've been upgraded from junk food to health bar. 1.3646 0.05758 96 65 27 4
1618 Your temperature is 325. 1.3646 0.06127 96 67 23 6
1619 After extensive testing, we have reached a half baked diagnosis. 1.3646 0.06806 96 71 15 10
1620 Rather, I would say fat, sugar, and running after years of inactivity finally caught you. 1.3646 0.05946 96 66 25 5
1621 For diagnostic purposes, we need your permission to take some samples. 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1622 I've bought a few colleagues to ta.., er, examine you. 1.3646 0.05946 96 66 25 5
1623 The good news, you're a culinary marvel. The bad news, immigration is outside, and they skipped their lunch. 1.3646 0.06304 96 68 21 7
1624 I'm afraid he is just one of a bigger batch that was admitted last night. 1.3636 0.06333 99 71 20 8
1625 I advise that we proceed most gingerly . . . . 1.3636 0.05824 99 68 26 5
1626 Well done. 1.3636 0.05824 99 68 26 5
1627 Your sugar is a little high. 1.3636 0.06804 99 74 14 11
1628 He’ll survive. He’s one tough cookie. 1.3636 0.06168 99 70 22 7
1629 'I'm afraid the only possible donor is your house' 1.3636 0.06333 99 71 20 8
1630 We think you're missing an ingredient 1.3636 0.05644 99 67 28 4
1631 The results of your DNA test were delicious, but inconclusive, so we’d like to run a tasting panel. 1.3636 0.05824 99 68 26 5
1632 Sugar's a bit low, but at least you're not in the burn unit. 1.3626 0.07249 91 69 11 11
1633 We've run some tests, and your blood sugar level is 3/4 a cup. 1.3619 0.06071 105 75 22 8
1634 Your insurance doesn't cover transginger surgery. 1.3617 0.06391 94 67 20 7
1635 That's how the cookie crumbles. 1.3617 0.06022 94 65 24 5
1636 I thought I told you to avoid gluten. 1.3617 0.06209 94 66 22 6
1637 Our team of specialists are confident we can get those blood sugar numbers down 1.3617 0.06022 94 65 24 5
1638 Oh, and there's a Mr. Fox wishing to see you. 1.3617 0.06907 94 70 14 10
1639 Your temperature is 350 f, that's perfectly normal 1.3617 0.05829 94 64 26 4
1640 Your cookie transition surgery was a success - good luck , Ginger. 1.3617 0.06022 94 65 24 5
1641 We've discovered a history of gluten in your family. 1.3617 0.06209 94 66 22 6
1642 THE FIRST GINGERBREAD WOMAN "You have nothing to worry about, it's just a different shape cutter". 1.3617 0.05629 94 63 28 3
1643 Good news! We found a compatible doughner! 1.3617 0.06022 94 65 24 5
1644 We hear you'd like to discuss ginger reassignment surgery? 1.3617 0.06391 94 67 20 7
1645 The good thing is, it's just a gluten allergy. The bad news... 1.3617 0.06391 94 67 20 7
1646 The specialists all agree ... you look crummy! 1.3617 0.05829 94 64 26 4
1647 They were listed as your emergency contacts under "parents". 1.3617 0.05829 94 64 26 4
1648 He's stale from the gum drop down... We will have to amputate. 1.3617 0.06391 94 67 20 7
1649 Your genetics test confirmed that you are 50% butter. 1.3617 0.05829 94 64 26 4
1650 You were stuck to the pan for nine hours. We were able to remove most of you, but we lost the icing. 1.3617 0.06022 94 65 24 5
1651 Oh yeah, he's done. 1.3617 0.05829 94 64 26 4
1652 It's nothing to worry about. He's just a little overdone. 1.3617 0.05829 94 64 26 4
1653 I'll try to give the news as gingerly as possible. 1.3614 0.07187 83 61 14 8
1654 Martha Stewart is in surgery with a premature Baked Alaska. But I've brought in America's Test Kitchen. 1.3614 0.06080 83 56 24 3
1655 This is a sad case of the cookie crumbling. 1.3614 0.06545 83 58 20 5
1656 Sorry to have to tell you this, but our considered opinion is that you're cooked. 1.3608 0.06419 97 70 19 8
1657 First the good news, Mr. Fetterman -- you smell delicious. 1.3608 0.06584 97 71 17 9
1658 I’m afraid you’ve exceeded your expiration date. 1.3608 0.05520 97 65 29 3
1659 The good news is, the milk didn’t soak above your hips. 1.3608 0.06250 97 69 21 7
1660 Good news. You're now gluten free. 1.3608 0.06075 97 68 23 6
1661 It's time for our afternoon sna... I mean, your biopsy. 1.3608 0.05711 97 66 27 4
1662 For a definitive diagnosis,we must eat your head. 1.3608 0.06250 97 69 21 7
1663 No I don't think icing it will fix your problem. 1.3608 0.05711 97 66 27 4
1664 The physical exam indicates he is full of sugar and spice, and everything nice. 1.3608 0.05711 97 66 27 4
1665 Are you prepared to meet your Makers? 1.3608 0.06584 97 71 17 9
1666 To complete the change from Gingerbread Man to Gingerbread Woman, we will remove the buttons and use the icing to create breasts. 1.3608 0.06075 97 68 23 6
1667 We want to run more taste tests. 1.3608 0.06250 97 69 21 7
1668 He suffers from tremendous guilt. His friends have lost all their limbs. 1.3608 0.05896 97 67 25 5
1669 It should be a routine procedure but I called for a consult from Culinary just in case. 1.3608 0.06250 97 69 21 7
1670 Should the surgery not go well, would you consider donating your body to culinary science? 1.3600 0.05777 100 69 26 5
1671 It looks like you're just half baked! 1.3600 0.06280 100 72 20 8
1672 I am sorry. Your blood sugar is too high. 1.3600 0.06439 100 73 18 9
1673 You wouldn’t believe your cholesterol levels. 1.3596 0.06240 89 62 22 5
1674 I really don’t know how you got Diabetes— it must be what you’re made of... 1.3587 0.05482 92 61 29 2
1675 Apparently we're recommending a milk bath. 1.3587 0.06101 92 64 23 5
1676 We hate to tell you this, but you have gingervitis. 1.3587 0.06839 92 68 15 9
1677 After extensive testing, we've decided that you should go gluten free. 1.3587 0.05696 92 62 27 3
1678 We think you've come down with a bad case of ginger-vitus. 1.3587 0.06481 92 66 19 7
1679 That's what happens when you run, run, run as fast as you can. 1.3579 0.06509 95 69 18 8
1680 Our unanimous opinion: You have an extreme case of "ginger-vitis" 1.3579 0.05970 95 66 24 5
1681 Your blood sugar is off the charts. 1.3579 0.06679 95 70 16 9
1682 I'm sorry sir, but it seems it's too late to add the salt. 1.3579 0.05970 95 66 24 5
1683 He's stable enough to be eaten. 1.3579 0.06155 95 67 22 6
1684 He appears to be suffering from fear of human consumption. 1.3579 0.05970 95 66 24 5
1685 We were able to remove all of the gluten. 1.3579 0.06155 95 67 22 6
1686 Soon we expect him to be good enough to eat. 1.3579 0.06334 95 68 20 7
1687 You're in good hands here at Sara Lee Memorial, ginger intolerance is not as rare as one might think. 1.3579 0.05583 95 64 28 3
1688 We're here to do the frosting. 1.3579 0.05780 95 65 26 4
1689 I really don't know why you don't have fingers, why don't you ask these guys? 1.3579 0.05970 95 66 24 5
1690 And that, students, is the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3579 0.06155 95 67 22 6
1691 It's serious...but we'll catch it if we can. 1.3579 0.06155 95 67 22 6
1692 If the medicine doesn't make you feel better, meet us in the cafeteria around lunchtime. 1.3579 0.06334 95 68 20 7
1693 We lost his brother to a bake sale, but I think he’s going to make it. 1.3563 0.06327 87 61 21 5
1694 The baking staff informs me you're not done yet. 1.3556 0.05978 90 62 24 4
1695 This is a classic case of ginger-vitis... 1.3556 0.06574 90 65 18 7
1696 We've examined your stool sample. It was delicious. 1.3556 0.06762 90 66 16 8
1697 Seems the kitchen has made a little error. We're going to have to move you to a gluten-free ward. 1.3548 0.05851 93 64 25 4
1698 After consultation, we think it's a ginger deficiency. 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1699 They found you on the kitchen floor. Apparently you were pretty baked. 1.3548 0.05648 93 63 27 3
1700 No, my recommendation was, fast if you can. 1.3548 0.06422 93 67 19 7
1701 I'm happy to report that you are officially gluten free. 1.3548 0.06422 93 67 19 7
1702 I'd like you to meet the team that will be assisting me in your hip reconstruction. 1.3548 0.05851 93 64 25 4
1703 The good news is, you can't catch it. 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1704 If you were covered, we could treat you. 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1705 Your test results are in, you have a yeast infection. 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1706 With your presentation we don”t typically Diagnose a yeast infection, but this new information indicates we can’t rule it out. 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1707 We got a quick rise out of you, didn't we? 1.3548 0.05851 93 64 25 4
1708 Gingivitis 1.3548 0.06777 93 69 15 9
1709 He is too sick to eat. 1.3548 0.06602 93 68 17 8
1710 Test results do indeed suggest a lack of self-raising flour, thus explaining your wife's disappointment. 1.3548 0.06947 93 70 13 10
1711 This one slipped on the icing. 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1712 Congratulations! You're well on your way to being irresistibly soft and delicious. 1.3548 0.06602 93 68 17 8
1713 Here we have what can happen when you apply a cookie cutter diagnosis 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1714 The good news is your temperature is no longer 350° and your sugar levels are outstanding! 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1715 I will not accept a cookie cutter diagnosis on this patient. 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1716 We're sorry but that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3548 0.06777 93 69 15 9
1717 The good news is, it's benign. Unfortunately for you, it's also delicious. 1.3548 0.06422 93 67 19 7
1718 This patient is one tough cookie. 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1719 I'm afraid a taste test is in order. 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1720 Your glucose level is very high! 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1721 I'd like to do a few tests--and also bite your head off. 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1722 To complete the sex change operation, simply remove the bottom button and align the upper two buttons. 1.3548 0.06777 93 69 15 9
1723 While the baking procedure itself was a success, I’m afraid we are missing a spatula... 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1724 Congratulation, your post-op test results show that you are now gluten free. 1.3548 0.06777 93 69 15 9
1725 Your sugar levels are very high! 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1726 It's thanks to them that you no longer feel crumby. 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1727 Your running days are over 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1728 We have you scheduled for a battery of tasting. 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1729 Let's handled him gingerly! 1.3548 0.06422 93 67 19 7
1730 You've lost a lot of raisins, but the good news is you're still edible. 1.3548 0.05648 93 63 27 3
1731 ...and is your emergency contact still a Mr. Muffin on Drury lane? 1.3548 0.05851 93 64 25 4
1732 We've gotta do something to lower your blood sugar, Jim 1.3548 0.05437 93 62 29 2
1733 We are trying to find out if you are still edible 1.3548 0.05851 93 64 25 4
1734 The bad news is that the burns are permanent. The good news? No one will eat you:) 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1735 I'm afraid "Gingerbread Person" is now the politically correct term. Accordingly, we had to remove some icing. Sorry. 1.3548 0.07113 93 71 11 11
1736 I see here your last request is you want to live with a cinnamon girl, correct? 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1737 Now, who can name the most delicious part of our patient? 1.3548 0.06422 93 67 19 7
1738 The patisserie department has done all they can but that's the way the cookie crumbles 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1739 I'm afraid I've got some crummy news. 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1740 Sir, I don’t think you understand what getting “baked” means. 1.3548 0.06602 93 68 17 8
1741 Your sugar is too high, we need to remove 5 tbsp of your right leg. 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1742 Good news: you're still edible. 1.3548 0.06238 93 66 21 6
1743 Your cholesterol is still a little high, but otherwise your response to the ginger supplements has been amazing. 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1744 Your test results are back...you've got a yeast infection. 1.3548 0.06422 93 67 19 7
1745 We have to operate right away. When were you last eaten? 1.3548 0.06602 93 68 17 8
1746 Well, the test results are in and, just as I suspected, it's a yeast infection. 1.3548 0.06422 93 67 19 7
1747 We're here to transfer you to a cookie sheet in the ICU 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1748 We had to call in a team of specialists. 1.3548 0.06047 93 65 23 5
1749 In your case, having a little one "in the oven" is not just an expression. 1.3544 0.06251 79 54 22 3
1750 Sir, we regret to inform you that our hospital is now gluten-free." 1.3542 0.06619 96 71 16 9
1751 As soon as you cool down a bit, we'll begin the... weight loss procedure 1.3542 0.05731 96 66 26 4
1752 Our psychological analysis would indicate he is only half baked. 1.3542 0.06279 96 69 20 7
1753 Worst case of gingervitis I've ever seen 1.3542 0.06619 96 71 16 9
1754 Good new. It's not the measles, they just had an excess of chocolate chips. 1.3542 0.05920 96 67 24 5
1755 We need to run a few taste tests. 1.3542 0.05537 96 65 28 3
1756 A classic case. Baking powder, not baking soda! 1.3542 0.06279 96 69 20 7
1757 Sorry for the terminal diagnosis, but that’s the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3542 0.06279 96 69 20 7
1758 I’m afraid staleness is a progressive condition, and there is no cure. It would be best if we ate you as soon as possible. 1.3542 0.06451 96 70 18 8
1759 Your glucose levels are off the charts . 1.3542 0.05920 96 67 24 5
1760 This patient has a severe case of Gingervitis. 1.3542 0.06451 96 70 18 8
1761 We had to remove your ginger root. 1.3542 0.06619 96 71 16 9
1762 I'm sorry but I'm afraid it's time you meet your maker. 1.3542 0.06279 96 69 20 7
1763 This patient took the cinnamon challenge. 1.3542 0.06279 96 69 20 7
1764 Good news, we where able to stop the crumbling. 1.3542 0.06451 96 70 18 8
1765 This is why we don’t play with our food 1.3535 0.06310 99 72 19 8
1766 We’d love to do your surgery sir, but you just don’t have enough dough to make that happen. 1.3523 0.07053 88 66 13 9
1767 That would surely explain the crumbs in the bed 1.3516 0.06698 91 67 16 8
1768 So much for your half-baked treatment 1.3516 0.06323 91 65 20 6
1769 The bad news: You’re Hyperglycemic. The good news: You’re delicious. 1.3516 0.06698 91 67 16 8
1770 A classic case of gingervitis. 1.3516 0.06698 91 67 16 8
1771 I'm going put this as gingerly as I possibly can... 1.3516 0.06127 91 64 22 5
1772 I'm afraid the prognosis is: That's how the cookie crumbles. 1.3516 0.06514 91 66 18 7
1773 Don't worry, you can't catch it. 1.3516 0.06127 91 64 22 5
1774 I promise my students will examine you gingerly 1.3516 0.06127 91 64 22 5
1775 Bad news - your glucose reading is off the chart. 1.3516 0.06514 91 66 18 7
1776 We think you may have low blood sugar, but just to be certain, one of us will take a bite. 1.3516 0.06127 91 64 22 5
1777 We're very pleased with your progress, and we think you'll be back on the table in no time. 1.3516 0.06127 91 64 22 5
1778 Yes, we treat all patients gingerly. 1.3516 0.05925 91 63 24 4
1779 We're looking at Consumption. 1.3516 0.06878 91 68 14 9
1780 We’ll have to treat this one gingerly. 1.3511 0.06365 94 68 19 7
1781 They're prescribing red and green icing. 1.3511 0.06183 94 67 21 6
1782 You're only half baked. That's your problem. 1.3511 0.06183 94 67 21 6
1783 Our team was able to reattach your leg with no complications. While we expect you to gain full use again, you may be walking gingerly for awhile. 1.3511 0.06183 94 67 21 6
1784 Don't worry, you can't catch it. 1.3511 0.06542 94 69 17 8
1785 Your sugar is too high. The plan is to remove your eyes and buttons and replace them with Brussel sprouts. 1.3511 0.06365 94 68 19 7
1786 We have bad news. You’re temperature is 350 degrees. 1.3511 0.05392 94 63 29 2
1787 They're here to assess your yeast infection. 1.3506 0.06605 77 54 19 4
1788 Let’s talk about surgical options. Leg first, arm first, or head first? 1.3505 0.06225 97 70 20 7
1789 A basic yeast antibiotic and you'll be up and running as fast as you can. 1.3505 0.05684 97 67 26 4
1790 Your stay should be shortening. 1.3494 0.06513 83 59 19 5
1791 And sometimes ... the cookie simply DOESN'T crumble... 1.3494 0.06283 83 58 21 4
1792 I'm afraid that at this point, all we can do is apply a fresh layer of frosting, that might prolong your shelf life for one, maybe two, weeks. 1.3488 0.06137 86 60 22 4
1793 And after consulting with my team of specialists, I'm happy to say you're now gluten free. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1794 Our tests indicate you have hardening of the icing. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1795 You are officially trans-ginger. 1.3483 0.06608 89 65 17 7
1796 You seem to have a gluten deficiency. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1797 You're getting old and stale. You just have to slow down. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1798 ...and the bad news is we're going to eat you. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1799 I don't like his sugar levels—he may lose that arm. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1800 Don't give us some half-baked story about why you didn't take your meds today. 1.3483 0.05079 89 58 31 0
1801 It wasn't easy, but we successfully removed your anise. 1.3483 0.06984 89 67 13 9
1802 No health insurance, but he's made of dough. 1.3483 0.06608 89 65 17 7
1803 We're going to need five taste tests...er, biopsies. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1804 So it says here you want to be a muffin man. 1.3483 0.06608 89 65 17 7
1805 Mr. Mann, I wish we could put this to you more gingerly, but you have a severe yeast infection. 1.3483 0.06608 89 65 17 7
1806 I just received a call from Betty Crocker suggesting we try 350 degrees for 45 minutes as our final attempt. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1807 We don't need lab results. Just a taste test will do. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1808 The specialists recommend you stay away from the cafeteria. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1809 We managed to reattach both legs, but your running days are over. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1810 We got the taste results back. 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1811 The team says a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1812 It’s the worst case of gingervitis I’ve ever seen. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1813 You're running a slight fever of 351 degrees. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1814 Good news! With just a light dusting of powdered sugar, you'll be good to go! 1.3483 0.06608 89 65 17 7
1815 Our expert bakers concur that you have a severe case of gingervitis 1.3483 0.06984 89 67 13 9
1816 We all concur… I’m afraid your run, run as fast as you can, you can't catch me, I'm the gingerbread man days are over. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1817 Your results are in. You’re gluten free. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1818 The prescription is exercise. Run, run, as fast as you can. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1819 We've brought you to the burn unit, sir. The chefs offer their apology. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1820 It's going to take a lot of dough to cure him! 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1821 The bad news is, it looks like a gluten allergy- 1.3483 0.06608 89 65 17 7
1822 We're still trying to figure out why the cookie crumbles. 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1823 Everything is back in place. Maybe you should find a girlfriend without a sweet tooth. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1824 1/4 tsp. ground cloves STAT! 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1825 We thought you were cooked, but we were able to pull you out. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1826 The bad news is that you need a raisin transplant. The good news is that we have just the team to do it. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1827 I'm afraid you'll need to move quite gingerly for the next few weeks. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1828 All your amputations will be done in good taste. 1.3483 0.05784 89 61 25 3
1829 Welcome Residents, to our Burn Unit. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1830 I brought in specialists to make sure, but they all say you are toast. 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1831 His initial diagnosis was gingivitis 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1832 As you all know by now, the patient must be treated gingerly. 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1833 This time tomorrow you'll be a muffin. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1834 I give you 8 to 10 minutes... at 350 degrees. 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1835 We know you'll pull through. You're one tough cookie. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1836 A member of my team is now ready to take a small sample. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1837 Don't worry, they just need to take a few samples from you. 1.3483 0.05784 89 61 25 3
1838 It's a third degree burn but the other ones are perfectly cooked. 1.3483 0.06608 89 65 17 7
1839 Good News! Your prognosis is delicious. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1840 The good news is that the bakers arrived before the sly fox had eaten much of you. The bad news is that you're not exactly the Gingerbread *Man* anymore. 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1841 Yes, you will be up and running as fast as you can in no time. 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1842 We need to run some more tastes. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1843 These chefs have informed me that's how the cookie crumbles 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1844 We're going to try icing. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1845 Thank you for signing the donor card. You'll make a lot of children very happy. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1846 Don't worry, we will treat you gingerly 1.3483 0.05784 89 61 25 3
1847 Yes, they've all been trained in sugar and spice and everything nice. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1848 I'm sorry sir, but we think it's a yeast infection 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1849 I'm sorry to report that your prognosis is: "Delicious" 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1850 I consulted with my team and we think colorful sprinkles may help. 1.3483 0.05784 89 61 25 3
1851 We’ve ordered six glasses of milk, stat. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1852 I assure you, their interest is purely academic. 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1853 This is the worst case of gingervitis I have ever seen 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1854 We believe it's a severe yeast infection. 1.3483 0.06412 89 64 19 6
1855 Thank you again for donating your body for gastronomical research 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1856 You're now gluten free. 1.3483 0.06608 89 65 17 7
1857 Your blood sugar needs to be addressed. 1.3483 0.06001 89 62 23 4
1858 I know the amputation is going to hurt, but relax, we’ll have cookies after. 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1859 This is what happens when you bake with Stevia instead of Demarrara sugar: a ginger snap right at the hips. 1.3483 0.05784 89 61 25 3
1860 I’m afraid you’re a little overdone, we’re going to have to move you to the burn ward. 1.3483 0.06210 89 63 21 5
1861 Your sugar blood levels are perfectly high. 1.3483 0.05784 89 61 25 3
1862 You are well and eligible to continue to be the President of the United States 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1863 I'm afraid you don't have much time. The ice cream just arrived. 1.3483 0.06799 89 66 15 8
1864 Are you feeling any batter? 1.3478 0.06636 92 68 16 8
1865 It all started with a rare case of Gingivitis. 1.3478 0.06072 92 65 22 5
1866 Unfortunately, pointy things get burned in the process and break off. On the bright side, they’re doing wonderful things with Twizzlers. 1.3478 0.06266 92 66 20 6
1867 Don't worry. We've handled dozens of cases like this. 1.3478 0.06072 92 65 22 5
1868 He was transferred from the burn unit where he presented as a battered husband. 1.3478 0.06814 92 69 14 9
1869 Can anyone guess which ingredient was over-administered to this patient? 1.3478 0.06266 92 66 20 6
1870 Well, I've got some crumby news, sir. We're afraid the confection is spreading to your gum drops. 1.3478 0.06636 92 68 16 8
1871 Good news, it's only a first degree burn. You'll be edible in no time. 1.3474 0.06128 95 68 21 6
1872 ...and the bad news is Donald Trump repealed Cookiecare. 1.3474 0.06308 95 69 19 7
1873 I defer your case to a more knowledgeable team. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1874 We're not sure what's wrong. All he keeps saying is "Catch me if you can." 1.3448 0.06903 87 65 14 8
1875 Her name is Ginger and she is one tough cookie. 1.3448 0.06903 87 65 14 8
1876 The lab tests confirm that your ginger count is very high. 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1877 My team and I feel you were battered at some point in your past. 1.3448 0.05856 87 60 24 3
1878 The test results are not so sweet. 1.3448 0.05856 87 60 24 3
1879 We're going to have to eat your leg. 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1880 There's no cookie cutter solution 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1881 This is the most advanced case of gingivitis we’ve seen 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1882 If you don't get eaten by Christmas, you could live forever. 1.3448 0.06707 87 64 16 7
1883 I’m sorry to have to tell you this, but you suffer from Irritable Batter Syndrome. 1.3448 0.06707 87 64 16 7
1884 They think ten more minutes at 350 and you can go home. 1.3448 0.06903 87 65 14 8
1885 You have a rare type of yeast so we can’t use a cookie-cutter approach. 1.3448 0.05856 87 60 24 3
1886 I know your treatment at the Keebler Clinic was a bit unorthodox, but the important thing is you can now look forward to a long and tasty life. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1887 I get the head 1.3448 0.07094 87 66 12 9
1888 We're here for the biopsies. 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1889 This, gentlemen, is the worst case of gingivitis I have ever seen! 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1890 We recommend treating you with whipped cream, but your insurance will only cover applesauce. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1891 We are going to need a few more samples for testing. 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1892 Congrats Mr. G.B. the chef is very pleased with the results of the operation: you are now gluten free! 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1893 Goodness...it appears you’re allergic to ginger! 1.3448 0.05856 87 60 24 3
1894 Lastly, we'll want a sample. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1895 The time has. come where we have to talk about your short shelf life. 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1896 We've decided to not sugar coat this. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1897 Fresh icing will make you more comfortable, but you are terminally stale. 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1898 I prescribed vanilla icing. You'll be back in the jar in no time. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1899 The good news, is the holidays are over... 1.3448 0.05856 87 60 24 3
1900 I can't operate on this cookie. He's my son. 1.3448 0.06707 87 64 16 7
1901 We're doing what we can to limit the spread of the confection. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1902 We’re going to have to order some tastes. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1903 After reviewing your chart, we decided you should meet your makers. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1904 We're waiting on the taste results, but you're running a fever and you've definitely caught something. 1.3448 0.05856 87 60 24 3
1905 We've developed a new treatment for resistant confections. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1906 And after removing your currants we will then perform the raisin replacement procedure. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1907 The tests indicate that you'll probably expire by Christmas. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1908 Sdly, a very low shelf-life expectancy runs in your family. 1.3448 0.06707 87 64 16 7
1909 It's for science. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1910 The operation was a complete success. You are now ginger neutral. 1.3448 0.06707 87 64 16 7
1911 It's a yeast infection. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1912 To avoid further damage you'll need to stretch before you run run as fast as you can. 1.3448 0.06707 87 64 16 7
1913 The fork test came back clean. You're done. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1914 Elective frosting's gonna cost you some dough. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1915 And when did you first notice your ginger allergy? 1.3448 0.06903 87 65 14 8
1916 We need your consent to have you for dessert. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1917 This operation should only take 10 minutes at 350 degrees. 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1918 It's our opinion you should never again run, run, as fast as you can. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1919 We've checked all your ingredients, you appear to be very edible. 1.3448 0.06707 87 64 16 7
1920 You'll be up and running in no time - it was just molasses slowing you down. 1.3448 0.06903 87 65 14 8
1921 His blood sugar is off the chart. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1922 As far as your swelling we decided to put some icing on it 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1923 Would you consider donating your body to the children's hospital? 1.3448 0.06903 87 65 14 8
1924 According to our tests, you have a severe gluten allergy. 1.3448 0.06707 87 64 16 7
1925 I’m afraid you’re colleague here has a bad case of the ‘You-Are-What-You-Eats.’ 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1926 Bob, it's time to stop running away from your problems. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1927 you'll be glad to know you only need 15 more minutes at 350 deg 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1928 We’re not sure what’s wrong. But we’ve come with this half-baked idea. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1929 This is a teaching facility, but I will be in the room to monitor preheat and icing. 1.3448 0.05623 87 59 26 2
1930 Our specialists believe it's a case of yeast infection. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1931 Our team of gingerbread men experts recommend you take up running, as fast as you can. 1.3448 0.06707 87 64 16 7
1932 Turns out it's a pretty bad yeast infection. 1.3448 0.07094 87 66 12 9
1933 The results are in, I'm sorry to say but it looks like you have a case of ginger-vitis 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1934 Yes, I’m afraid you’ve got a case of gingervitis. 1.3448 0.06903 87 65 14 8
1935 Dr. Biscotti and his team will be performing his popular 'procedure' with you. 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1936 Exactly when did you start feeling half baked? 1.3448 0.06080 87 61 22 4
1937 Could you please state your name, date of birth and oven temperature? 1.3448 0.06903 87 65 14 8
1938 We have found that a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down. 1.3448 0.05856 87 60 24 3
1939 We'd like to keep him overnight and perform a few more toothpick tests 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1940 I'm afraid we're going to have to remove your gluten. 1.3448 0.06504 87 63 18 6
1941 My diagnosis is that you had too many cooks. 1.3448 0.06296 87 62 20 5
1942 We used liposuction to remove the excess cream filling, but the collagen lip injections may have been a bit much. 1.3448 0.05623 87 59 26 2
1943 I wish there was something we could do, but that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3444 0.05510 90 61 27 2
1944 Sir, we understand what happened to your house was traumatizing, but you can't stay here. 1.3444 0.05946 90 63 23 4
1945 We're not here to draw blood. But could we break off a finger? 1.3444 0.05946 90 63 23 4
1946 The results of the biopsy are in. You’re Scrumptious. 1.3444 0.06352 90 65 19 6
1947 I got too baked last night. 1.3444 0.06546 90 66 17 7
1948 Our consensus is, you're done. 1.3444 0.05733 90 62 25 3
1949 We'll need to schedule a few more tastes. 1.3444 0.06352 90 65 19 6
1950 I think he said, "You want a piece of me?" 1.3444 0.06153 90 64 21 5
1951 We've decided that you can continue as president. You are only half-baked. 1.3444 0.06734 90 67 15 8
1952 We feel that you're ready for discharge, but we need a series of bite-size biopsies to be sure. 1.3444 0.06153 90 64 21 5
1953 Mr. Gingerbread, welcome to Americas test hospital. 1.3444 0.06734 90 67 15 8
1954 We're going to have to start by taking your leg off. 1.3444 0.06352 90 65 19 6
1955 Our surgical team, led by Dr. Fox, has recommended a series of amputations. 1.3444 0.06734 90 67 15 8
1956 We're sorry, but our final diagnosis is, "That's the way the cookie crumbles." 1.3444 0.06352 90 65 19 6
1957 Not quite as fun when we do catch you, is it? 1.3444 0.07269 90 70 9 11
1958 In truth, now that we've caught you, we're not sure what to do next. 1.3444 0.06546 90 66 17 7
1959 According to our tests, you're a Christmas recipe from Sarah Huckabee Sanders. 1.3444 0.06734 90 67 15 8
1960 He's feeling crumby today. 1.3444 0.06546 90 66 17 7
1961 He was accidentally overbaked and he says he feels crumby. 1.3444 0.06917 90 68 13 9
1962 We'll get you out of here as fast as we can. 1.3441 0.05821 93 65 24 4
1963 We regret to inform you, but we've gone gluten free. 1.3418 0.06951 79 58 15 6
1964 It may be a half baked theory, but I would say too much cinamon. 1.3418 0.06211 79 55 21 3
1965 It seems, I'm afraid, that men like you will always suffer a high rate of consumption. 1.3418 0.06211 79 55 21 3
1966 Boulanger, start the molasses drip. 1.3415 0.06543 82 59 18 5
1967 My advice is 'run-run-run'. 1.3415 0.06309 82 58 20 4
1968 Four more minutes at 350 and you should be fine. 1.3415 0.07201 82 62 12 8
1969 Did you really run as fast as you can? 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
1970 First, we need to know: Have you taken any leaveners? 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
1971 After consulting with my colleagues, we have determined your prognosis to be delicious. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
1972 I went to went to med school at Penn and did my internship at Pillsbury. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
1973 We have discussed your prognosis and we'd all like to take an additional sample to confirm our diagnosis, if you don't mind. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
1974 He says he wants his gluten removed. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
1975 Good news! Your test results for yeast infection were negative. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
1976 You'll be OK, you just got a little too baked. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
1977 It seems our course of action was half-baked. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
1978 Sure, he looks sweet but he's completely nutty 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
1979 You've been caught. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
1980 Sir, you understand by signing this document you are agreeing to donate your remains to our research team. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
1981 Does anyone have his recipe? 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
1982 We only amputate as a last resort, but sometimes it is irresistable. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
1983 He's having trouble controlling his sugar. 1.3412 0.05689 85 58 25 2
1984 We suggest you run run as fast as you can. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
1985 I've called in a team of specialists. 1.3412 0.06809 85 63 15 7
1986 It took five specialists to bake you back together. 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
1987 Snap out of it! 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
1988 I'm pleased to inform you that you are now gluten free 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
1989 I’ve consulted a few experts! 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
1990 We'll need 50 CCs of milk for this. 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
1991 Your prognosis is terminally delicious. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
1992 On the contrary, sir; they can and they did. 1.3412 0.07209 85 65 11 9
1993 They forgot the eggs. 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
1994 We all agree you are well enough now to return to the bakery. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
1995 Yes, there is some risk involved in this procedure, so before we get started, I wanted to give you a chance to meet your makers. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
1996 When did you first notice your batter wasn't rising. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
1997 His wife says his yeast won't rise. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
1998 Looks like a classic case of a molasses deficiency. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
1999 ...and when did you first suspect that everybody just wanted to eat you? 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2000 You seem a little flat today. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2001 Well, that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2002 Have you considered organdoughnation? 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2003 You know what they say....Once bitten... 1.3412 0.05689 85 58 25 2
2004 The consensus is that you lack sufficient icing. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2005 Students, I want you to see what a half-baked man looks like. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2006 He's feeling half-baked, so please treat him gingerly. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2007 We know,we know, your nose is on its way. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2008 In all my years in this business, I've never seen a ginger snap quite like this one folks. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2009 I'm worried about his high sugar level. It may account for his hyperactivity. 1.3412 0.05689 85 58 25 2
2010 His sugar spiked and he fainted. 1.3412 0.05689 85 58 25 2
2011 Before you go, we just need to do a taste test. 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
2012 All I can remember is, I was running... 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
2013 Your case is unusual but we have put together a team that will be able to serve you. 1.3412 0.06809 85 63 15 7
2014 The good news is nothing's broken. The bad news is you're expected for dessert. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2015 We're 99% certain it's a yeast infection. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2016 My team also recommends a dash of cinnamon, but that is not covered by your insurance. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2017 You should've run faster. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2018 "... and on a more eclectic note, Ginger Baker also says "Get Well Soon!". 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
2019 We think you have a yeast infection. 1.3412 0.07012 85 64 13 8
2020 It's cheaper to bake another one than to heal this one. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2021 Your brown sugar level is dangerously high. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2022 No firm diagnosis yet - just a few half-baked ideas. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2023 I’m pleased to inform you that the vanilla extraction was a success. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2024 The operation was a success. You'll be rolling in the dough again in no time. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2025 Your cinnamon levels are dangerously low. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2026 Your body fat is excellent, but I've called these specialists in on your case because your glucose levels are the highest I've ever seen. 1.3412 0.06809 85 63 15 7
2027 The operation was a success. You're officially gluten free. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2028 The creamotherapy is working. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2029 ...and you live on Drury Lane? 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2030 As your doctor, I would recommend that you run, run as fast as you can! 1.3412 0.06809 85 63 15 7
2031 They're telling me that a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2032 Given your maximum lifespan expectancy, we are just going to move you up to the kids ward. 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
2033 As you can see, this is a teaching hospital. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2034 Please examine him gingerly. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2035 Your sugar is through the roof. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2036 Roll over. We need to check you for doneness. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2037 "Test results are conclusive: I'm sorry, but you are still sweet enough to eat. 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
2038 “Classic Yeast Infection”... 1.3412 0.07012 85 64 13 8
2039 I'm afraid you only have three to six bites left. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2040 Where are you tender? 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2041 Multiple opinions indicate you're not done yet. 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
2042 I thought it best to bring in a team of specialists. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2043 You’re temperature is still 350 degrees, we’ll need you to cool over night. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2044 Tests show that ginger is the root of your problems. 1.3412 0.05689 85 58 25 2
2045 We’ve brought in specialists; you appear to have a yeast infection. 1.3412 0.06809 85 63 15 7
2046 His sugar is low. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2047 The good news is you'll be walking soon with the help of a candy cane. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2048 What kind of insurance do you have? 1.3412 0.06809 85 63 15 7
2049 Well the good news is the little old woman isn't going to press charges. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2050 You're gluten intolerant. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2051 He's riddled with gluten. 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
2052 It was too much nutmeg, right? 1.3412 0.05689 85 58 25 2
2053 Test results show zero fats, no sugar, and gluten free, resulting in a serious case of BLANDNESS. 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2054 His house burned, and he just snapped. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2055 Our team of specialists has determined that you are Delicious! 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2056 I count only three gumdrops. Where's the fourth? 1.3412 0.05437 85 57 27 1
2057 Your situation is delicate. We will need to handle your case gingerly. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2058 I’m feeling crummy. 1.3412 0.06600 85 62 17 6
2059 We have to operate. You're allergic to ginger. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2060 I’d like you to meet the team that made your transition possible. 1.3412 0.06161 85 60 21 4
2061 The surgery will not increase your life expectancy, but it will make you the first Gingerbread Woman." 1.3412 0.06385 85 61 19 5
2062 It's safe to say we can rule out gingivitis. 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
2063 lay off the molasses and you'll be back to running as fast as you can. 1.3412 0.05930 85 59 23 3
2064 The original prognosis was half baked. 1.3409 0.05802 88 61 24 3
2065 Looks like your running days are over, and it's time to meet your makers. 1.3409 0.06442 88 64 18 6
2066 We have all come to the conclusion that you are “half baked”. 1.3409 0.06023 88 62 22 4
2067 The operation was successful, the prognosis excellent. You're now gluten free. 1.3409 0.07024 88 67 12 9
2068 It may be how you feel, but you don’t look crumby! 1.3409 0.06442 88 64 18 6
2069 I'm afraid those aren't buttons. 1.3409 0.05802 88 61 24 3
2070 We brought in specialists... 1.3409 0.06442 88 64 18 6
2071 I'm afraid your insurance doesn't cover preheated conditions. 1.3409 0.06236 88 63 20 5
2072 They're here to harvest your ingredients, if things don't go well 1.3409 0.06236 88 63 20 5
2073 No, Mr. Smith, the cinnamon in your stool should not be cause for alarm. 1.3409 0.06442 88 64 18 6
2074 We’re going to prescribe you some marijuana so you can stay baked all day. 1.3409 0.06442 88 64 18 6
2075 Without preservatives there’s little hope. 1.3409 0.06236 88 63 20 5
2076 Your results came back with elevated sugar levels, so my colleagues are prescribing dipping you in milk. 1.3409 0.05333 88 59 28 1
2077 So, your primary symptom is that you believe you taste funny? 1.3409 0.05802 88 61 24 3
2078 I have invited a few specialists to help with your case. 1.3409 0.06442 88 64 18 6
2079 And here we see ginger ail. 1.3409 0.06642 88 65 16 7
2080 Our team of experts is ready to make you anatomically correct. 1.3407 0.06670 91 68 15 8
2081 They all agree. Too much sugar. 1.3407 0.06096 91 65 21 5
2082 Mr Smith, a tragic mistake has occurred between our kitchen and surgery staffs. 1.3373 0.06477 83 60 18 5
2083 It appears the nurse forgot to butter his bedpan. 1.3373 0.06916 83 62 14 7
2084 He was misdiagnosed, he's toast 1.3373 0.06700 83 61 16 6
2085 We've determined that you're stale 1.3373 0.06916 83 62 14 7
2086 There's just no way to share this with you gingerly. 1.3373 0.06006 83 58 22 3
2087 Your sugar level is dangerously high. We might have to eat one of your legs. 1.3373 0.06700 83 61 16 6
2088 Ironically, he is ginger intolerant. 1.3373 0.06916 83 62 14 7
2089 Stick a fork in him. 1.3373 0.06477 83 60 18 5
2090 You're beginning to crumble. 1.3373 0.06246 83 59 20 4
2091 The patient has chest pain from running as fast as he can. Icing it hasn’t helped. 1.3373 0.06477 83 60 18 5
2092 You're right that they can't catch you, but you definitely caught something. 1.3373 0.06916 83 62 14 7
2093 We’re going to run this by your insurance as fast as we can. 1.3373 0.06477 83 60 18 5
2094 Don`t worry, we will have you back in the oven in no time. 1.3373 0.05757 83 57 24 2
2095 Unfortunately, the mold is broken. 1.3372 0.06102 86 61 21 4
2096 Lucky for you the Fox was allergic to gluten 1.3372 0.06102 86 61 21 4
2097 Yes. it is time to meet your makers. 1.3372 0.06535 86 63 17 6
2098 Unfortunately your Trumpcare plan only covered chefs, not surgeons. 1.3372 0.06322 86 62 19 5
2099 It may be serious. They left out 1/4 teaspoon of baking soda. 1.3372 0.06535 86 63 17 6
2100 They are here to harvest your gum drop buttons. 1.3372 0.06741 86 64 15 7
2101 I'm afraid we'll have to amputate 1.3372 0.06322 86 62 19 5
2102 Good news! The test came back negative. You're a hundred percent gluten-free. 1.3372 0.06102 86 61 21 4
2103 I understand you filed a complaint about oven temperature. 1.3372 0.05388 86 58 27 1
2104 Whatever it is, I don’t think we can catch it. 1.3372 0.06322 86 62 19 5
2105 We all think you look really good. 1.3372 0.06741 86 64 15 7
2106 Just as we suspected...He's one sick cookie. 1.3372 0.06535 86 63 17 6
2107 It would appear that we can indeed catch you. 1.3372 0.06102 86 61 21 4
2108 We're from the Julia Child School. You need a butter transfusion. 1.3372 0.06322 86 62 19 5
2109 The staff and I believe you're ready to be discharged to the cafeteria 1.3372 0.06322 86 62 19 5
2110 His chest aches. So let’s try icing it. 1.3372 0.06322 86 62 19 5
2111 Unfortunately, you also have gingivitis. 1.3372 0.06322 86 62 19 5
2112 You know that expression, 'an arm and a leg'? Well, guess what? 1.3372 0.06535 86 63 17 6
2113 The good news is, the bite was small. The bad news is, you are absolutely delicious, and we've decided to eat you whole. 1.3372 0.06102 86 61 21 4
2114 Your gender reassignment was a success. 1.3372 0.06102 86 61 21 4
2115 Nothing is wrong with it. It's just gluten-free. 1.3372 0.06535 86 63 17 6
2116 Sorry. No more "Run, Run, Run, as fast as you can" for you for awhile. 1.3371 0.06177 89 64 20 5
2117 The only risk is that no one will want to eat you. 1.3371 0.05967 89 63 22 4
2118 Going gluten-free may have been a mistake. 1.3371 0.06769 89 67 14 8
2119 Don't worry, whatever he's got you won't be able to catch it. 1.3371 0.06177 89 64 20 5
2120 For this patient, however, I do think we should take the cookie-cutter approach. 1.3371 0.06177 89 64 20 5
2121 Royally iced, reacting slower than molasses, severe post-holiday depression, and claims his home was destroyed 1.3371 0.06955 89 68 12 9
2122 Well, the oven temperature was set a little too high, but you've recovered nicely. You'll be out and eaten very soon. 1.3371 0.06177 89 64 20 5
2123 Your blood sugar's a little high. 1.3371 0.06177 89 64 20 5
2124 We caught it as fast as we could, but the gingervitis is spreading. 1.3370 0.06424 92 68 17 7
2125 I'm going to have to figure out a way to get his sugar levels down 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2126 The course of treatment my team is recommending is 375 for 15 to 17 minutes. 1.3333 0.05827 81 56 23 2
2127 Your medical coverage has ceased because yesterday was your expiration date. 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2128 Our advice: run, run, run as fast as you can. 1.3333 0.06845 84 63 14 7
2129 We are sorry, sir. The diagnosis is gingervitis. 1.3333 0.06746 78 57 16 5
2130 Now Mr. Ginger, would you prefer that our female culinary residents step out for a moment while we examine the burns on your buns? 1.3333 0.06471 87 64 17 6
2131 Tell us what happened on Drury Lane 1.3333 0.06086 81 57 21 3
2132 My advice? Try not to get better. 1.3333 0.06334 81 58 19 4
2133 You are staying put, till your temperature gets back to 350 degrees. 1.3333 0.05948 84 59 22 3
2134 We're sorry, but you tested positive for gluten. 1.3333 0.05584 87 60 25 2
2135 I'm afraid you're allergic to ginger. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2136 We need to test your sugar levels one more time. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2137 The good news is we think you will be able to led a normal life. The bad news is we left out one of the ingredients. 1.3333 0.06185 84 60 20 4
2138 The operation was unsuccessful, but that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2139 I’m afraid we’re going to have to remove the leg, then the other leg, then the arms and then, we’ll, you can figure it out from there. 1.3333 0.07252 84 65 10 9
2140 A cookie cutter case for the most part, but proceed gingerly. 1.3333 0.06675 87 65 15 7
2141 We're not going to lie. Our optimism is crumbling. 1.3333 0.06086 81 57 21 3
2142 After further reviewing your condition, I have instructed the staff to treat you gingerly. 1.3333 0.06185 84 60 20 4
2143 That may be true sir, but you can catch IT. 1.3333 0.05948 84 59 22 3
2144 He's been here since Christmas -- his back was severely burnt. 1.3333 0.06804 81 60 15 6
2145 We've decided it must be something that's eating you. 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2146 The good news is you can still run but I'm afraid you're still edible. 1.3333 0.05819 87 61 23 3
2147 Your family is here to take you home. 1.3333 0.06086 81 57 21 3
2148 Before this everyone doubted their choice of a double major. 1.3333 0.06845 84 63 14 7
2149 It appears that he is baked out of his mind. 1.3333 0.07027 81 61 13 7
2150 They apologize for mixing up the baking soda with the baking powder. 1.3333 0.06845 84 63 14 7
2151 In the event the procedure fails, Mr. Breadman, please sign here to authorize us as your doughner recipients. 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2152 It's a bad sprain but some more icing should do the trick. 1.3333 0.06804 81 60 15 6
2153 Your spice reassignment surgery was a success, Garlicbread Man. 1.3333 0.06845 84 63 14 7
2154 We need you to sign the consent form before we put you in the oven. 1.3333 0.06632 84 62 16 6
2155 Not to worry, folks, he's just a little burned out! 1.3333 0.07027 81 61 13 7
2156 We are pleased to inform you that your transition was a complete success! 1.3333 0.07658 81 64 7 10
2157 Yes, you did run fast, but time catches us all. 1.3333 0.06334 81 58 19 4
2158 You've given birth to a fine dough boy! 1.3333 0.06515 90 67 16 7
2159 We think too much sugar -- and the expiration date. 1.3333 0.07027 81 61 13 7
2160 Your sugar is low... so I’ve brought in our frosting specialists. 1.3333 0.07450 78 60 10 8
2161 You're ginger count tested low. 1.3333 0.06086 81 57 21 3
2162 With this condition, the nose is the first thing to go. 1.3333 0.06334 81 58 19 4
2163 We think it's a yeast infection. But he's uninsured and doesn't have enough dough to pay. 1.3333 0.06632 84 62 16 6
2164 Yes Ginger, You are a Man! 1.3333 0.06185 84 60 20 4
2165 We’re with Bakers Without Borders and we have a few questions for you, 1.3333 0.06804 81 60 15 6
2166 Well, at least we cured the yeast infection. 1.3333 0.06086 81 57 21 3
2167 Physically there's no damage...he suffers from a recurring image of a giant glass of milk pursuing him 1.3333 0.05702 84 58 24 2
2168 We've decided to treat this one gingerly. 1.3333 0.06675 87 65 15 7
2169 This is the most severe case of Gingervitis we have ever encountered! 1.3333 0.06872 87 66 13 8
2170 We're gonna need to take 6 biopsies. 1.3333 0.06845 84 63 14 7
2171 Our plastic surgery team is quite confident, Mr. Gumby. 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2172 Congratulations. You're the world's first successful Transginger reassignment. 1.3333 0.07051 84 64 12 8
2173 Oh, do you know the muffin man, the muffin man, the muffin man? 1.3333 0.06044 87 62 21 4
2174 This patient presented with extremely high blood-glucose and third-degree burns over the entirety of his torso. We anticipate he'll be gone by snack time. 1.3333 0.06989 78 58 14 6
2175 We're sorry to inform you that your prognosis is poor – you've gone stale. 1.3333 0.05948 84 59 22 3
2176 It's certainly the most ironic case of diabetes I've ever seen. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2177 The good news is, you still have your head. 1.3333 0.06086 81 57 21 3
2178 I said baking sheet not bed sheet! 1.3333 0.06804 81 60 15 6
2179 I'm afraid it's Gingervitis 1.3333 0.06334 81 58 19 4
2180 Patient presents with stale skin, high blood sugar, two extra belly buttons, and a slight gingerbread odor 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2181 We'd like to take a few more tissue samples. 1.3333 0.06261 87 63 19 5
2182 Your sugar level is slightly elevated, but we'll try to get you out of here in one piece! 1.3333 0.06334 81 58 19 4
2183 We're sorry to be a little early, but the fruit cake next door is not quite ready. 1.3333 0.05948 84 59 22 3
2184 He looks pretty battered up. 1.3333 0.06261 87 63 19 5
2185 Obamacare does not cover allspice, what would you like to do? 1.3333 0.06845 84 63 14 7
2186 We have a batch of options. 1.3333 0.06632 84 62 16 6
2187 Turns out, you're healthier than you look. 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2188 I’m very sorry, but yes, you’ve tested positive for gluten. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2189 We have a few more tastes to perform on you before you're discharged. 1.3333 0.06086 81 57 21 3
2190 Your running days are over 1.3333 0.06261 87 63 19 5
2191 I'm really sorry but after taking a closer look at your batter, we did find some lumps. 1.3333 0.07051 84 64 12 8
2192 We're still not sure what caused it, but your sugar level is through the roof. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2193 It's not your appetite I'm worried about. 1.3333 0.06321 90 66 18 6
2194 Your labs show high levels of gluten. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2195 You passed out because your sugar was too low. 1.3333 0.06185 84 60 20 4
2196 I didn't say a battery of tests, I said they were going to test your batter. 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2197 We’re starved for ideas, so we’ll have to amputate. 1.3333 0.06804 81 60 15 6
2198 You'll never again be able to run as fast as you can. 1.3333 0.05948 84 59 22 3
2199 We're not surprised this happened. You were not cut out for the life you were leading. 1.3333 0.06632 84 62 16 6
2200 We will proceed with our examination as soon as Dr. Lebeuw arrives with the milk. 1.3333 0.06185 84 60 20 4
2201 All we know is he’s a John Doe, from Drury Lane. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2202 Then the children did WHAT to your house? 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2203 You didn't know ginger snaps? 1.3333 0.06804 81 60 15 6
2204 Rest assured that after rehab you’ll be flat on your back again, unable to sit up. 1.3333 0.06632 84 62 16 6
2205 I'm sorry, but you'll never run again. 1.3333 0.06804 81 60 15 6
2206 It took a team of specialists, but we've successfully completed your ginger reassignment surgery. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2207 It's just a yeast infection. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2208 Let’s try a Taste Test 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2209 I don’t know whether to treat him or eat him 1.3333 0.05819 87 61 23 3
2210 You're in good hands. My team never goes off half-baked or offers cookie-cutter diagnoses. 1.3333 0.06632 84 62 16 6
2211 We're not sure how to put this, but we fear you'll soon be a broken man. 1.3333 0.06932 75 55 15 5
2212 Congratulations! You're officially gluten-free. 1.3333 0.06185 84 60 20 4
2213 Thanks to these guy's we were able to reconstruct the leg, but the milk damage on the house is more extensive then we thought 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2214 We see this a lot in our gluten free patients. 1.3333 0.06632 84 62 16 6
2215 Unfortunately we can’t make you better. But you’re already delicious! 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2216 Your biopsy showed signs of deliciousness. 1.3333 0.06632 84 62 16 6
2217 He presented in the ER with dimidium cocta...he's half baked. 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2218 Unfortunately your health insurance expired December 26. 1.3333 0.06632 84 62 16 6
2219 Your blood sugar levels have stabilized, but we want to perform one more taste test. 1.3333 0.07027 81 61 13 7
2220 He keeps asking for the muffin man. Any suggestions? 1.3333 0.06185 84 60 20 4
2221 All that sugar did catch up with him. 1.3333 0.06086 81 57 21 3
2222 Blood sugar level's off the charts. 1.3333 0.07027 81 61 13 7
2223 Apparently you can out run everyone except the measles 1.3333 0.06573 81 59 17 5
2224 You have the worst case of gingervitis we've ever seen 1.3333 0.06471 87 64 17 6
2225 You've got severe burns, but your diagnosis is delicious. 1.3333 0.06845 84 63 14 7
2226 Our partnership with the School of Culinary Arts is a great success: You are now gluten-free. 1.3333 0.06185 84 60 20 4
2227 We think it’s too much sugar. 1.3333 0.06412 84 61 18 5
2228 Great news. All tests show you are gluten free. 1.3297 0.06261 91 67 18 6
2229 Our proposed treatment is better than your typical cookie-cutter solution. 1.3295 0.06409 88 65 17 6
2230 We can’t keep readmitting you every time you see a glass of milk. 1.3295 0.06201 88 64 19 5
2231 I’ll say this as gingerly as possible. 1.3295 0.06409 88 65 17 6
2232 We're cautiously optimistic that you can outrun this. 1.3294 0.05891 85 60 22 3
2233 We had a donor match for you, but he was unfortunately turned into pie crust on the way to the operating room. 1.3294 0.06124 85 61 20 4
2234 We have sent your bowl out to be licked. 1.3294 0.06565 85 63 16 6
2235 Unfortunately, the scan indicates you were pulled from the oven 3 minutes early. 1.3294 0.05891 85 60 22 3
2236 hi, I am the Chef resident .... 1.3294 0.06565 85 63 16 6
2237 We're still searching for a non-GMO donor. 1.3294 0.06348 85 62 18 5
2238 His ginger levels are fine, but his cinnamon count is really low. 1.3294 0.06124 85 61 20 4
2239 His condition is delicious. 1.3294 0.06565 85 63 16 6
2240 If we bake you a Gingerbread Woman, will you promise not to run away again? 1.3294 0.06348 85 62 18 5
2241 I’m afraid that your lifestyle has finally caught up with you. 1.3294 0.06565 85 63 16 6
2242 Good news is, you have a curable case of gingeRvitis. Bad news is, we all think that sounds absolutely delicious. 1.3293 0.06733 82 61 15 6
2243 You can't run away from your genetics. 1.3293 0.05770 82 57 23 2
2244 Fortunately, when we made you, we didn't break the mold. 1.3293 0.05770 82 57 23 2
2245 Don't worry sir, I've brought in the experts. 1.3293 0.06505 82 60 17 5
2246 We suggest you watch the sugar. 1.3293 0.06505 82 60 17 5
2247 We need to get a second opinion from the pastry chef. 1.3293 0.06505 82 60 17 5
2248 We're delighted to report that you're now fully edible, and you do look yummy! 1.3293 0.06270 82 59 19 4
2249 You seem rather stale. What can we do to perk you up? 1.3293 0.05770 82 57 23 2
2250 As your cardiologist, I recommend that you cut back on the butter. 1.3293 0.06505 82 60 17 5
2251 Does "out of the oven prematurely" count as a pre - existing condition? 1.3293 0.06025 82 58 21 3
2252 It's just a bad case of seasonal affective disorder 1.3293 0.06733 82 61 15 6
2253 We found a donor. 1.3293 0.06270 82 59 19 4
2254 How long have you had this burning sensation? 1.3293 0.06270 82 59 19 4
2255 I didn't want to sugarcoat this, but the specialists confirm that you are actually a snicker doodle. 1.3293 0.06505 82 60 17 5
2256 You have until Christmas to live. 1.3293 0.06270 82 59 19 4
2257 Your sugar level is a bit elevated. 1.3293 0.06505 82 60 17 5
2258 He’s been suffering from depression ever since his house was eaten over the holidays 1.3293 0.05770 82 57 23 2
2259 Your glucose is off the chart. 1.3293 0.06025 82 58 21 3
2260 Apparently you can catch the gingerbread man. 1.3293 0.06505 82 60 17 5
2261 We can't get him to rise. 1.3293 0.06505 82 60 17 5
2262 Good news! It’s only a yeast infection 1.3293 0.06733 82 61 15 6
2263 The hospital cafeteria staff agrees you can leave if you just fork over an arm and a leg. 1.3293 0.06733 82 61 15 6
2264 Well chefs, we've finally created some competition for the Pillsbury Doughboy. 1.3293 0.06025 82 58 21 3
2265 Looks like your sugar is out of control, but we'll run a few tastes on you just to be sure. 1.3291 0.06674 79 58 16 5
2266 Are you an organ donor? 1.3288 0.07313 73 55 12 6
2267 I summoned the bakers for a consult. I'm not happy with that nibbling sensation that you are feeling. 1.3256 0.06908 86 66 12 8
2268 We need more dough to pay for the surgery. 1.3256 0.06286 86 63 18 5
2269 Cremate or bake at 350 F.? 1.3253 0.06439 83 61 17 5
2270 We are thrilled to inform you that our first trans-ginger procedure was a complete success. 1.3253 0.06206 83 60 19 4
2271 Chefs concur you have a yeast infection. 1.3253 0.05713 83 58 23 2
2272 We have never seen such a severe case of yeast infection. 1.3253 0.06663 83 62 15 6
2273 He's been experiencing shortness of bread. 1.3253 0.06663 83 62 15 6
2274 Amazingly, he survived first degree burns over his entire body. 1.3253 0.06206 83 60 19 4
2275 So you say that you feel that everyone is trying to take a bite out of you? 1.3253 0.06663 83 62 15 6
2276 "It appears you were low on sugar". 1.3250 0.06358 80 58 18 4
2277 He’s got a bit of a sweet tooth. I’d say we have a classic case of ginger-vitis. 1.3250 0.06838 80 60 14 6
2278 Can you identify the person that flattened you? 1.3250 0.06602 80 59 16 5
2279 We're having trouble deciding where to start — head or feet. 1.3250 0.06838 80 60 14 6
2280 I'm not sure how to break this to you, so I think we're going to start with your legs. 1.3250 0.06602 80 59 16 5
2281 It says right here you plan to donate your body to culinary science. 1.3250 0.06104 80 57 20 3
2282 Good news, you’re baked to perfection. 1.3250 0.05839 80 56 22 2
2283 In cases like yours, we prefer to let the fever run, run, run its course as fast as it can. 1.3250 0.05839 80 56 22 2
2284 The prognosis is good - it's only a mild case of the crumbles. 1.3250 0.06602 80 59 16 5
2285 You're still suffering from amnesia. You are not Mr. Potato-Head. 1.3250 0.06104 80 57 20 3
2286 Thanks to the team, the tests show that you are now completely gluten free! 1.3250 0.06358 80 58 18 4
2287 Frankly, we didn't expect you to last this long. 1.3250 0.05839 80 56 22 2
2288 For 12 to 15 minutes, Mr. G Bread experienced an elevated temperature of almost 375 degrees! 1.3250 0.06358 80 58 18 4
2289 You are probably asking yourself - was I really cut out for this part? 1.3250 0.06104 80 57 20 3
2290 You're in luck. We specialize in just this sort of thing. 1.3250 0.06104 80 57 20 3
2291 About your sore knee- after consultation we've decided to try icing it. 1.3250 0.06838 80 60 14 6
2292 Your spice reassignment went perfectly, Cinnamonbread Man. 1.3250 0.07065 80 61 12 7
2293 we are afraid you are allergic to ginger. 1.3250 0.06104 80 57 20 3
2294 Obviously he's broken. Ginger bread does not bend once it sets. 1.3250 0.06838 80 60 14 6
2295 It’s the best outcome you could have hoped for considering your health insurance plan. 1.3250 0.07065 80 61 12 7
2296 Don't worry, the surgery to remove your appendix will be cookie cutter. 1.3250 0.06358 80 58 18 4
2297 The good news is that the recipe was a success. The bad news is that we're going to eat you now. 1.3250 0.06358 80 58 18 4
2298 We've never done ginger reassignment surgery. 1.3250 0.06838 80 60 14 6
2299 His temperature's still 350, his pulse is a little doughy, and there's a surprising lack of genitalia. 1.3250 0.07065 80 61 12 7
2300 Your vitals are good, but we need to run some taste tests to make sure. 1.3250 0.06602 80 59 16 5
2301 Thank you all for coming. I'm recommending a molasses drip, but would love to get your opinions, since that will have very slow results. 1.3247 0.06778 77 57 15 5
2302 We realize that your previous therapy was half-baked so we recommend 375 degrees for ten minutes 1.3247 0.06521 77 56 17 4
2303 The important thing we want you to remember is that therapy includes lots of icing. 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
2304 Bad news - your temperature is 350. 1.3243 0.06117 74 52 20 2
2305 I'm afraid you have a fatal case of ginger-vitis 1.3214 0.06595 84 63 15 6
2306 Nothing that a little extra time in the oven won't cure 1.3214 0.06374 84 62 17 5
2307 We're just here to run a few nibbles, er... tests. 1.3210 0.06292 81 59 18 4
2308 Be sure to handle him very gingerly. 1.3210 0.05781 81 57 22 2
2309 Take two gumdrops and call me in the morning. 1.3210 0.06292 81 59 18 4
2310 The good new is your tissue samples are delicious. 1.3210 0.06533 81 60 16 5
2311 You don't have the dough for our services 1.3210 0.06292 81 59 18 4
2312 Most recent episode happened when he ran, ran as fast as he can. 1.3210 0.06533 81 60 16 5
2313 Ok, you may each take a small bite before the surgeon gets here.... 1.3210 0.06292 81 59 18 4
2314 We have come to the conclusion that your suicide attempt was half-baked. 1.3210 0.06533 81 60 16 5
2315 They got the doughboy. He'll pay for this. 1.3210 0.06292 81 59 18 4
2316 We've brought in a team of specialists to explain your half-baked diagnosis. 1.3210 0.06042 81 58 20 3
2317 We have placed him on a diet of extra sugar and cinnamon, hoping this will sweeten his disposition. 1.3205 0.06187 78 56 19 3
2318 Next we just need to check the internal temperature. 1.3205 0.06187 78 56 19 3
2319 On further examination it appears that you're toast. 1.3205 0.06947 78 59 13 6
2320 We've come to a diagnosis: you're half-baked. 1.3205 0.06703 78 58 15 5
2321 They used to build houses. 1.3205 0.06703 78 58 15 5
2322 “We’ve decided to treat your condition gingerly”. 1.3205 0.06450 78 57 17 4
2323 Don't worry-It's nothing a little frosting can't cure. 1.3205 0.06187 78 56 19 3
2324 Good news. We found an icing donor. 1.3205 0.06187 78 56 19 3
2325 Technically, you are still a gingerbread man. 1.3205 0.06703 78 58 15 5
2326 We've dressed up your surgical team to help you feel at home. 1.3205 0.06450 78 57 17 4
2327 The tastes all came back negative. 1.3205 0.06947 78 59 13 6
2328 The prognosis is delicious. 1.3205 0.06947 78 59 13 6
2329 Admissions has you down for a Cafeteria Plan. 1.3205 0.06947 78 59 13 6
2330 The test results came back. I'm afraid you're store-bought. 1.3205 0.06187 78 56 19 3
2331 Don't be alarmed, we just call it the 'taste test.' 1.3205 0.06450 78 57 17 4
2332 We've determined that you were baked in a factory containing nuts. 1.3205 0.06450 78 57 17 4
2333 I've been stumped by your condition, so we brought in a team of specialists. 1.3205 0.06703 78 58 15 5
2334 We've successfully replaced your gum drop buttons with Cotton Candy balls. Your allergy rash should clear up soon. 1.3205 0.06947 78 59 13 6
2335 We'll have you up and running in no time. 1.3205 0.06703 78 58 15 5
2336 We are pretty sure it was too much butter. 1.3205 0.05911 78 55 21 2
2337 I'm terribly sorry. We weren't aware of your raisin allergy. 1.3205 0.05911 78 55 21 2
2338 You're just a little stale. 1.3205 0.05911 78 55 21 2
2339 Congratulations Sheila, your transginger operation was a success. 1.3205 0.07632 78 62 7 9
2340 Sorry, but your insurance doesn't cover baked goods. 1.3205 0.06450 78 57 17 4
2341 He gets the ginger from his mom's side of the family. 1.3205 0.06450 78 57 17 4
2342 I’m sorry to tell you, but you’re about to crumble. 1.3200 0.06051 75 53 20 2
2343 Sadly, the condition will eat him alive. 1.3194 0.07616 72 56 9 7
2344 One teaspoon of baking powder will get you up in no time. 1.3188 0.07297 69 52 12 5
2345 Your blood sugar is off the charts again. 1.3188 0.06688 69 50 16 3
2346 Could be a yeast infection. Our chefs would like to run some tests. 1.3176 0.06309 85 63 17 5
2347 The good news is, it’s December 26. 1.3171 0.06464 82 61 16 5
2348 We're going to have to take you back to the kitchen. There are no cookies allowed in bed. 1.3171 0.06693 82 62 14 6
2349 This patient is a victim of cookie cutter medicine 1.3165 0.05850 79 56 21 2
2350 We’re worried that even though you look fresh, you may have been sitting out too long. 1.3165 0.05850 79 56 21 2
2351 I'm not going to sugarcoat it, the results weren't good. 1.3165 0.06630 79 59 15 5
2352 On a positive note, your cinnamon levels have normalized. 1.3165 0.06630 79 59 15 5
2353 And at this time tomorrow you’ll be a gingerbread woman. 1.3165 0.07103 79 61 11 7
2354 Just making the rounds with my interns. Mind if they nibble? 1.3165 0.06121 79 57 19 3
2355 The toothpick came out clean and after a brief cooling you'll be ready to eat. 1.3165 0.06871 79 60 13 6
2356 Fortunately for you, the bacteria are only flesh-eating. 1.3165 0.06630 79 59 15 5
2357 Well, Mr. Gingerbread, our half-baked specialists will have you up and running in no time. 1.3165 0.06871 79 60 13 6
2358 We’d like to run an involved series of taste tests. 1.3165 0.06121 79 57 19 3
2359 Ginger, before you try to get up, the bakers who made you came to apologize. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2360 Four out of five pastry chefs agree — it's a severe case of gingervitis. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2361 You have no orthopedic surgeons in network, but I have some other options. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2362 We’re all pleased that your sex change surgery was successful. For all intents and purposes, you’ve become a Gingerbread Woman. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2363 He was admitted last night with dangerously low cinnamon and ginger levels 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2364 Your cinnamon panels came back normal. You can expect to live a normal life span of 2 to 3 days. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2365 With any luck, you'll be up on your feet and eaten within a week. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2366 He seems a little underdone to me. Do you all concur? 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2367 These pastry chefs are here to adjust your sugar so you’ll never be caught again. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2368 The problem is to many cooks. 1.3158 0.07305 76 59 10 7
2369 Don't worry! We brought a group of specialists. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2370 When you arrived, your temperature was 350 degrees. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2371 It's the brown sugar diabetes. We have to bite your leg off. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2372 We've got the scan. The good news is that those tumors were just raisins. The bad news is that there were fewer than we like to see. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2373 I'm so sorry, but you've got The Crumble. 1.3158 0.07771 76 61 6 9
2374 We just need you to sign this consent form before we administer the taste test. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2375 Once your molasses and cinnamon levels are in range, you’re ready. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2376 Food poisoning. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2377 We agree on the prognosis: warm and chewy. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2378 Your temperature is a perfect 375. You can be served, I mean, discharged now. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2379 We think another 30 minutes in the microwave should do it. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2380 Congratulations on your 'Ginger Re-assignment' Janet, you now have a candy cane. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2381 So currently you are feeling a little bit ginger? 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2382 So you think you're a Napolean? 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2383 The basic protocol is that we first remove the head. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2384 His symptoms are the result of half baked ideas. 1.3158 0.05367 76 52 24 0
2385 And who's half-baked idea was this?!! 1.3158 0.07305 76 59 10 7
2386 15 minutes at 350 degrees will fix you right up. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2387 The bakers want to know what qualities you'd appreciate in a wife. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2388 We’d like to stick you with a toothpick to see if you’re still half-baked. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2389 I'm sorry to have to inform you, sir, but it looks like you're going to need a gumdrop replacement. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2390 We regret you're not in the shape we’d hoped. Our policy is to eat our mistakes. 1.3158 0.07771 76 61 6 9
2391 Our diagnosis is that you overbaked. Sadly, because you've cooled, your condition is irreversible. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2392 We could add icing to lower your fever, but your blood sugar's too high. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2393 I'm afraid I've got some bad news. It's gluten." 1.3158 0.07305 76 59 10 7
2394 It's a severe case of ginger-vitis. We'll have you up and running as fast as we can. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2395 Other than the elevated glucose, everything appears to be in order for a cookie your age. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2396 My personal recommendation is, RUN, RUN, AS FAST AS YOU CAN !!! 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2397 The Baker's Guild has requested that you update your organ donor status. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2398 I've brought in our palliative care team to discuss your treatment plan. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2399 Your cinnamon levels are sky high! 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2400 A little icing here and there and he should be fine. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2401 The consensus is that your wound needs a bit more icing. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2402 It's not an eating disorder. The prescribed recipe just has to be gluten free. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2403 Let’s make a snap decision. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2404 Everyone, meet John Doe. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2405 This is the last one: a tasting test. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2406 While I’m on vacation, rest assured you will have the best of care under my new interns, Doctors Lagasse, Bourdain, De Laurentiis, Flay, and Deen. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2407 We have a new treatment, but you're going to need a lot more dough. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2408 Fever's gone. Not sure if it's the antibiotics or because we took him out of the oven. 1.3158 0.05685 76 53 22 1
2409 I want to get your sugar levels down. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2410 The team is in agreement - you're just a little underdone. Five minutes in the oven will have you up and run-run-running again. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2411 He claims he's trans-ginger. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2412 We highly recommend that you please stop running as fast as you can. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2413 We'd like your permission to do a little frosting. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2414 Initial tests have been inconclusive, but one thing is for sure. Something's eating him. 1.3158 0.05685 76 53 22 1
2415 Feeling a bit snappish today, are we? 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2416 You need to take things more gingerly. 1.3158 0.05685 76 53 22 1
2417 Here we have an acute case of gingeritis 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2418 It's not good news. We are all here to eat you. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2419 I fear it's even worse than the Humpty Dumpty case. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2420 Good news. Your insurance allows us to put on candy sprinkles at no additional cost. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2421 Fortunately his insurance covers pre-existing confections. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2422 They've realized their mistake and want to remove the shoes. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2423 The bad news is we can't turn you back. The good news is we've nearly finished your house. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2424 You’ll be fine; you’re just half-baked. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2425 He has some half-baked ideas. Send him to psychiatry. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2426 I wouldn’t be too concerned about the sponge bath. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2427 If you don't stop taking in so much sugar, it will be a recipe for disaster. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2428 The specialists sadly concur, sir. You're one sick cookie. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2429 We have decided to treat you gingerly. 1.3158 0.07305 76 59 10 7
2430 The insurance company has rejected your claim for icing reassignment. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2431 ...and these fine folks from Habitat for Bakery Goods are going to build you a new house. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2432 I'm afraid your molasses level is quite low. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2433 I thinked he needs to be completely cooled on a baking sheet. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2434 Well, we caught you. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2435 He appears to have acute hardening of the molasses! 1.3158 0.07542 76 60 8 8
2436 These people are from ICEing. I'm afraid you've overstayed your welcome. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2437 Your blood sugar is off the charts, but we brought in help. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2438 It's all the molasses - slowin' you down." 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2439 We'll need to test your blood sugar. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2440 We don't usually see this at this time of the year. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2441 And here we have a patient suffering from “you are what you eat” syndrome. 1.3158 0.07305 76 59 10 7
2442 Caught Ya 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2443 I am afraid your gluten will have to be removed. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2444 My team is going to do exploratory surgery to see what you are made of. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2445 Sir my colleagues here assure me that in spite of some half baked policies, we can make Gingerbread great again! 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2446 You're in much better shape than your friend Humpty Dumpty. He's been scrambled. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2447 We think your sugar is low. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2448 It’s just a yeast infection. You will be rising in no time. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2449 It's not about us catching you, it's about what you caught. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2450 The test results are in.................you're done. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2451 Even your bakers think you look fried. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2452 At your age, it's time to stop running. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2453 Unfortunately, you have incurable gingeritis. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2454 Unfortunately, that's the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2455 You have elevated ginger levels in your blood. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2456 You apparently outwitted the Fox. These nice chefs want you to join them for dinner. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2457 Good news, you’ll recover soon. Bad news, you’ll be back in the oven and then eaten. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2458 The consensus is that there has been no overdose of ginger. However, you are seriously over baked. 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2459 This will be a cookie cutter operation. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2460 Since the merger, this is a teaching hospital AND a test kitchen. 1.3158 0.07061 76 58 12 6
2461 So far your tests show your sugar levels are very high. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2462 Well, we ran some tests in the kitchen and it appears to be no more than an extreme case of gingervitus. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2463 We're trying to figure out the reason for so much sugar in your urine. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2464 What's the post-operative treatment plan? Why, we eat you. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2465 It seems he was running as fast as he could when he suffered the heart attack. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2466 My best advice? If a fox offers to give you a ride across a river -- I'd decline. 1.3158 0.07542 76 60 8 8
2467 Nothing to worry about. Just a slight touch of gingervitis. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2468 Let's try icing first, then you should chill for at least two hours... 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2469 You'll be fine - I think you just got a little overheated. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2470 It turns out he's allergic to ginger 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2471 You were out for days so we had a little fun with the full body cast. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2472 We'll get you fixed as fast as we can, but your running days are over. 1.3158 0.05367 76 52 24 0
2473 My diagnosis is that you’re half baked. 1.3158 0.06808 76 57 14 5
2474 After serious consultation, we’ve concluded your half baked! 1.3158 0.06272 76 55 18 3
2475 He's still too warm to ice. 1.3158 0.05986 76 54 20 2
2476 You may choose to remain genderless as you were created, or we can attach a little "identity" if you wish. 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
2477 Fever's gone. We took you out of the oven just in time 1.3151 0.05475 73 50 23 0
2478 Once we get your temperature to a hot 375 degrees, you'll be just fine. 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
2479 Great news, Cookie; you'll soon be good enough to eat! 1.3143 0.07207 70 53 12 5
2480 Gluten intolerance--autoimmune, I'm afraid. 1.3134 0.06795 67 49 15 3
2481 And absolutely no snacking on the patient. 1.3133 0.05401 83 58 24 1
2482 Your test results indicate an acute case of Gingervitis 1.3125 0.06313 80 59 17 4
2483 Yes, we've put your child in the oven -- I mean the incubator. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2484 We're going to run, run some tests as fast as we can. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2485 Yes, I see they didn't catch you, but you certainly caught something. 1.3117 0.05313 77 53 24 0
2486 You have low blood sugar. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2487 We are going to have to treat this patient very gingerly 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2488 Just a few more days and you'll be able to run, run as fast as you can! 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2489 We're running tests fast, as fast as we can. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2490 ...and so we'll need to treat him gingerly for the next 48 hours. 1.3117 0.06732 77 58 14 5
2491 With a cooling rack, the procedure is safe and well tolerated. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2492 He slipped in the icing. 1.3117 0.06732 77 58 14 5
2493 Sadly, you are gluten intolerant. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2494 Your vanilla is dangerously low. 1.3117 0.05921 77 55 20 2
2495 This man has a gingersnap fracture. I recommend heat treatments for 20 minutes at 350 and we'll see how he tastes in the morning. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2496 Firstly, do not let our lab coats fool you: We are not doctors. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2497 Our goal is to have you up and run run running as fast as you can as soon soon soon as possible. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2498 Good news. You're sugar free. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2499 You pulled through quite well, though your sugar's a bit high. 1.3117 0.06732 77 58 14 5
2500 The patient reported feeling crumby. 1.3117 0.06732 77 58 14 5
2501 Anyway you slice it, the guy looks great. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2502 My diagnosis would be gingeritis. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2503 ...and he had a temperature of 350 degrees. 1.3117 0.06732 77 58 14 5
2504 The good news is you're still delicious. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2505 You scan shows numerous cracks. Unfortunately, you will have to be re-iced. 1.3117 0.05921 77 55 20 2
2506 We’ve concluded that your sugar is way too high. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2507 You have acute gingivitis 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2508 « After the procedure you will need to keep up a strict icing routine. » 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2509 It was a hit and run. Looks like it was the muffin man. 1.3117 0.05921 77 55 20 2
2510 I'm afraid your running days are over! 1.3117 0.05921 77 55 20 2
2511 I'll be performing the surgery, and this is the frosting team. They need to know your icing type. 1.3117 0.06981 77 59 12 6
2512 We'd like to run a few taste...I mean test. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2513 Take two teaspoons of baking powder and call me in the morning. 1.3117 0.05921 77 55 20 2
2514 Yes... I see... and how many of these bakers do you typically hallucinate at one time Mr. Gingerbread Man? 1.3117 0.06732 77 58 14 5
2515 Telling someone they were past their ‘best before date’ never got any easier. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2516 And that’s the way the cookie crumbles. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2517 Your temperature is down from 350.6 to normal. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2518 I've called in a team of specialists. 1.3117 0.06981 77 59 12 6
2519 Contrary to your belief, this will not be a piece of cake! 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2520 We did what we could but you only have sixty bites to live. 1.3117 0.05921 77 55 20 2
2521 You're gluten-free to go. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2522 One of our surgeons did a pastry fellowship in France, so this appendectomy will be a piece of cake. 1.3117 0.05626 77 54 22 1
2523 The good news is the operation will only cost an arm and a leg. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2524 Sir, we recommend a milk dunking to take the edge off. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2525 He'll be fine as long as he doesn't go near the kids. 1.3117 0.07222 77 60 10 7
2526 We thought we'd lost you; you were pretty baked when they brought you in. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2527 He gives a half-baked story of being unable to rise from bed. 1.3117 0.06473 77 57 16 4
2528 I'm afraid he's half baked. 1.3117 0.05626 77 54 22 1
2529 Our next patient has a half-baked clinical history so let's treat him gingerly. 1.3117 0.06981 77 59 12 6
2530 Thankfully, we caught you early. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2531 Your wife and children were eaten after the accident, but we are baking you a new family as we speak. 1.3117 0.06203 77 56 18 3
2532 Do you know the muffin man? I believe he lives on Drurery Lane 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2533 Do you consent to donate your organs to help feed the hungry? 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2534 My main concern: is that a temperature of 375 degrees is definitely too high. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2535 He's simply suffering from exhaustion, imagining that everyone's chasing him. 1.3108 0.05749 74 52 21 1
2536 No worries. Just snip snip and it's bye-bye little dough boys. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2537 Your chart indicates you're here because you feel crumby. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2538 We've run the test and it appears you're lactose intolerant 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2539 You have a yeast allergy. 1.3108 0.07180 74 57 11 6
2540 My team and I specialize in patients who may contain soy, dairy, wheat, tree nuts, shellfish, and eggs. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2541 On the bright side you will taste delicious. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2542 The surgery was a success. You are now officially uncatchable. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2543 It appears that you are cancer free, but, unfortunately, you are not gluten free. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2544 Now that we’ve finally caught you..... 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2545 It appears the consensus is that you donate your body to dessert. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2546 Gluten free for you may be a recipe for disaster... 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2547 It's your kidneys. It turns out they're, well... delicious. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2548 My team stands ready to work on your house next. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2549 For your condition, I brought in specialists. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2550 We're attributing the stiffness to being left out of the tupperware. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2551 And this is an example of too much butter. 1.3108 0.05749 74 52 21 1
2552 Don't fool yourselves. This is no "cookie-cutter" case. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2553 We think you have restless leg syndrome. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2554 When your condition reached 'mouthwatering,' the harvesting team assembled stat. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2555 You were saved by a last minute addition of 1/4 cup of molasses 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2556 They sincerely apologize for leaving the oven on too long! 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2557 Well, I couldn’t find anything wrong with you so I’ve brought in some specialists from the Catering Core. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2558 Good news! You passed the ginger test with flying calories. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2559 By all appearances you should soon be able to run, run, run, as fast as you can. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2560 If the treatment is unsuccessful, they’re hoping you’ll donate your body to the kitchen. 1.3108 0.07180 74 57 11 6
2561 I have good news: as far as we're concerned you're done. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2562 To confirm my half-baked diagnosis, my colleagues now need to break off and eat your hand. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2563 We all think your sugar's too low! 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2564 We're pleased you've decided to donate your body to science. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2565 Obviously, gluten free and vegan. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2566 You need to cut down on the sugar 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2567 You appear to be gluten intolerant. 1.3108 0.07180 74 57 11 6
2568 They want permission to make five dozen clones. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2569 These bakers have volunteered to make your house match your new body. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2570 Your dough is no good around here. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2571 The good news is you're not contagious, but we'd still like to do one more taste. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2572 Since you are a made man, St. Honoratus has brought on a special team to perform your phalloplasty. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2573 We performed a nutmeg transfusion and a trans fat transplant. You should be as scrumptious as the day you were baked. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2574 We are especially proud of this one, the first ever Oatmeal to Gingerbread transition. 1.3108 0.07180 74 57 11 6
2575 He jumped from the oven and pulled a hammy as he ran, ran, ran. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2576 The source of your paranoia may be due to watching Fox news. 1.3108 0.07679 74 59 7 8
2577 There's more of us behind the curtain. Now, what's the recipe? 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2578 Milk is his life's blood. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2579 My associates and I agree, your blood sugar is a little high. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2580 We won’t sugargar coat what the tests show— you have a ruptured raisin. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2581 Medically speaking, the flu ran as fast as it can. And it caught you. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2582 We understand you want to be gluten free. We are here for your re-assignment surgery. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2583 And this is Mr. G. Bread....His presenting complaint is that he got mixed up with gluten-free flour and now he feels like he’s falling apart. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2584 The cloning experiment-we call it a "recipe"-was a success! 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2585 The interns would like to take samples to taste...... er test. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2586 It’s relatively new, but you’re suffering from serious gluten deficiency. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2587 I'm sorry, we'll have to replace your gumdrops. This may take a while. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2588 Good news is we removed the gluten..bad news is you still taste awful 1.3108 0.07180 74 57 11 6
2589 What you see is the tragic result of substituting maple syrup for molasses! 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2590 We'd like to perform some medical tastes. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2591 We caught your condition as fast as we can. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2592 Gentlemen, we can re-bake him. We have the technology. Better than he was before. Tastier, spicier, cuter. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2593 Looks like Ginger ailing again. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2594 Let's order a big glass of milk. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2595 he says he feels crummy 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2596 Sorry, you will never be able to "run run as fast as you can" anymore. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2597 Remember when your mother told you that if you eat one more gingerbread cookie you ‘d turn into one... 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2598 And what are the side-effects of getting baked? 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2599 If anyone has a half-baked diagnosis keep it to yourself. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2600 How are you tasting, I mean feeling this morning? 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2601 Run, run, as fast as you can. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2602 We wanted you to be assured we will handle your procedure gingerly. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2603 Would a spoonful of sugar help the medicine go down? 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2604 We're going to have to eat you to find out what's really wrong. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2605 We want to run a few more taste tests. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2606 Your depression is normal after the holidays. 1.3108 0.05749 74 52 21 1
2607 I am so sorry sir but you have reached your expiration date, and if we did CPR you might snap! 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2608 You have what we call a baker’s cyst... 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2609 We'd send you home, but it's still being baked. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2610 It typically starts with the head. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2611 It turns out, Henry, that you're sugar and spice, And all that's nice; That's what little girls are made of. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2612 This is what happens when you run, run, as fast as you can from vaccinations. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2613 As this is a teaching bakery, I've asked a student to collect your sample. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2614 Unfortunately... saying "catch me if you can i'm the gingerbread man" doesnt work with real diseases. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2615 Thankfully, we caught you early. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
2616 We're all going to need multiple biopsies 1.3108 0.07180 74 57 11 6
2617 Regrettably we had to amputate both of your legs...but we assure you they were delicious. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2618 There appears to be nothing wrong with him other than his insistence of being called "The Gingerbed Man". 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2619 I have good news and bad: Your blood sugars are cholesterol are off the charts, but you did exceedingly well on the cognitive exam. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2620 Name; BreadMan, Ginger. Complaint; Half baked, Paranoid with delusions of being delicious. Diagnosis; Chocolate chip bumps, cinnamon pallor. Lips have glossy icing appearance. Prognosis; Good with milk for a week to ten days. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2621 The bad news is that your stem cell surgery went horribly awry. The good news is that you'll be in big demand during the holiday season. 1.3108 0.07180 74 57 11 6
2622 I decided to bring in more specialists. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2623 Life was short, but sweet 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2624 I can't help you, but I've brought in a crack team of pastry chefs. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2625 Avoid swimming in milk, and your legs should be just fine. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2626 Mike here has a running injury. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2627 vanilla extract stat! 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2628 The specialist agree. You're done 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2629 Good news. You've been upgraded to 'Yummy'. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2630 Now our staff will explain the organ donor program. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2631 The lab results are back, you need to be Gluten free now 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2632 With your insurance, this is the best we could do. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2633 . . . and the tasting team will check your sugar levels while you last. 1.3108 0.07434 74 58 9 7
2634 No, we don't use the spoon to take your temperature. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2635 I’m sorry. We don’t offer a gluten-free transfusion option. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2636 Another hit-and-run steamroller. 1.3108 0.06062 74 53 19 2
2637 Are we feeling batter this morning? 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2638 I understand you said you're ready to meet your maker? 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
2639 I'm afraid my colleagues tell me your running days are over. 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2640 What you need is more exercise, so run, run as fast as you can! 1.3108 0.06360 74 54 17 3
2641 These are our best surgeons. They will be in charge of icing the wound. 1.3099 0.06213 71 51 18 2
2642 Who wants first bite at this one? 1.3099 0.05880 71 50 20 1
2643 I'm not going to sugarcoat this. If you don't stay out of the oven, pretty soon you'll be toast. 1.3099 0.06830 71 53 14 4
2644 1. His symptoms are very cookie cutter. 2. Perhaps we added too much ginger. 3. He says he heard something snap. 4. He’s got a bad case of gingeritis. 1.3099 0.06830 71 53 14 4
2645 We're going to examine you ... very gingerly. 1.3088 0.06710 68 50 15 3
2646 You are extremely lucky that we got you before the frosting was applied. 1.3088 0.06375 68 49 17 2
2647 You have a gluten intolerance. 1.3088 0.06710 68 50 15 3
2648 I'm ordering blood sugar levels on this guy, stat! 1.3077 0.06657 78 59 14 5
2649 No, they will not make any jokes about 'How the Cookie Crumbles.' 1.3077 0.05859 78 56 20 2
2650 stiffness is a common side effect, milk usually helps. 1.3077 0.06136 78 57 18 3
2651 We are prepping the O.R. to 350 degrees. You should be in and out in 20 minutes. 1.3077 0.06657 78 59 14 5
2652 I’ve got muffin but good news. The surgery was a piece of cake. You’re eclair of cancer. 1.3077 0.06903 78 60 12 6
2653 Well, your sugar and chlosterol levels came back quite high. 1.3077 0.06402 78 58 16 4
2654 Tests indicate you have nutmeg deficiency. We'll have to rebake. 1.3077 0.06402 78 58 16 4
2655 Indeed, a chronic case of gingivitis. Can't be caught. 1.3077 0.06136 78 57 18 3
2656 Yes, I believe we have all the ingredients for success. 1.3077 0.06903 78 60 12 6
2657 His temperature is 350 degrees. We'll try icing him. 1.3077 0.06402 78 58 16 4
2658 Now just remember- no swimming, no foxes. 1.3077 0.06136 78 57 18 3
2659 The surgery was a success, but he's self identifying as a snickerdoodle. 1.3077 0.07140 78 61 10 7
2660 Looks like that fever really cooked you. 1.3077 0.06402 78 58 16 4
2661 We would recommend that you do not run and run as fast as you can this time. 1.3067 0.06569 75 56 15 4
2662 I've got good news. The specialists have determined that it's not a tumor. It's a yeast infection. 1.3067 0.07346 75 59 9 7
2663 We are going to have to put you on a gluten-free diet." 1.3067 0.06288 75 55 17 3
2664 Your condition began when you were subjected to a temperature of 375 degrees for 10-11 minutes. 1.3067 0.06288 75 55 17 3
2665 Well, should we treat him or eat him? 1.3067 0.06569 75 56 15 4
2666 I assured them I'd treat you gingerly. 1.3067 0.06569 75 56 15 4
2667 It appears that you have only been half baked 1.3067 0.06569 75 56 15 4
2668 They’re advising more icing. 1.3067 0.07096 75 58 11 6
2669 One last question before your surgery, sir: are you a willing organ donor? 1.3067 0.06288 75 55 17 3
2670 I'm afraid the prognosis is already baked in. 1.3067 0.06288 75 55 17 3
2671 It seems you have gluten. 1.3067 0.06569 75 56 15 4
2672 Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to bake a gingerbread house he can live in. 1.3067 0.05995 75 54 19 2
2673 Bake for 30 minutes at 350° and call me in the morning. 1.3067 0.05995 75 54 19 2
2674 I'm going to keep you in at 325 and refer you to a confectionist. 1.3067 0.06569 75 56 15 4
2675 Transginger. 1.3067 0.06288 75 55 17 3
2676 You might feel a slight pinch with the next procedure which entails biting off your head. 1.3067 0.07096 75 58 11 6
2677 Third degree burns over ninety eight percent of his body. Another two percent and he'll be perfect. 1.3067 0.06837 75 57 13 5
2678 we think it is a mild case of gingeritis. 1.3067 0.06288 75 55 17 3
2679 I have here the results of your glucose test. I’m afraid it doesn’t look good. 1.3067 0.06569 75 56 15 4
2680 The operation was a success, but there were some unintended consequences ... 1.3067 0.07346 75 59 9 7
2681 I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but my team insist that further samples are needed before they can arrive at a conclusive diagnosis. 1.3067 0.05995 75 54 19 2
2682 Sir, we assure you that the President's physical has been moved to another floor and all the milk in this hospital has been destroyed 1.3067 0.06837 75 57 13 5
2683 Are you gluten free? 1.3067 0.06837 75 57 13 5
2684 It's seasonal affective disorder. It will pass. 1.3067 0.06569 75 56 15 4
2685 We believe any further treatment would just leave you battered. 1.3067 0.06569 75 56 15 4
2686 I'm afraid your HMO doesn't cover sprinkles or icing , so it seems you'll have to run home as is. 1.3067 0.05995 75 54 19 2
2687 We may have treated you too gingerly. 1.3067 0.06837 75 57 13 5
2688 We think your sugar a little high. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
2689 We think after the procedure, not only should you be able to walk, you will be able to run, run as fast as you can. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
2690 We believe in sharing at this Hospital. 1.3056 0.06141 72 52 18 2
2691 It looks like your wife was right all along - you are half-baked. 1.3056 0.06141 72 52 18 2
2692 Its a miracle he survived after sustaining burns of 350 degrees Fahrenheit. 1.3056 0.06141 72 52 18 2
2693 Good news! I found some specialists for your gingervitis. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
2694 I said "run some tests", not "tastes". 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
2695 Ginger, good news, you're no longer the man you use to be. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
2696 Good news- it’s just a case of gingivitis. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
2697 Unfortunately your insurance policy only covers the gum drop buttons. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
2698