Rank |
Caption |
Mean |
Precision |
Total votes |
"Unfunny" votes |
"Somewhat funny" votes |
"Funny" votes |
0 |
I dreamt last night that some day judges might just require a small plastic bracelet |
2.0328 |
0.02299 |
61 |
0 |
59 |
2 |
1 |
They’re known for their unconditional love. |
2.0278 |
0.01950 |
72 |
0 |
70 |
2 |
2 |
It's called a "pet." |
2.0134 |
0.00946 |
149 |
0 |
147 |
2 |
3 |
I know he's extinct. Try telling him that. |
2.0116 |
0.00820 |
172 |
0 |
170 |
2 |
4 |
Do you guys remember the code for the alarm? |
2.0102 |
0.00720 |
196 |
0 |
194 |
2 |
5 |
I'm considered a flight risk. |
2.0094 |
0.00948 |
106 |
0 |
105 |
1 |
6 |
Cave arrest isn't as comfy as I thought it would be |
2.0091 |
0.00641 |
220 |
0 |
218 |
2 |
7 |
I don't think this "pet" thing will ever catch on. |
2.0089 |
0.00630 |
224 |
0 |
222 |
2 |
8 |
Sure it hurts, but that’s fashion. |
2.0061 |
0.00615 |
163 |
0 |
162 |
1 |
9 |
I was hoping for more of an emotional attachment. |
2.0051 |
0.00509 |
197 |
0 |
196 |
1 |
10 |
Only if I think about it. |
2.0046 |
0.00462 |
217 |
0 |
216 |
1 |
11 |
I parked in a toe-away zone. |
2.0043 |
0.00436 |
230 |
0 |
229 |
1 |
12 |
He's very clingy. |
2.0042 |
0.00423 |
237 |
0 |
236 |
1 |
13 |
He's very attached. |
2.0042 |
0.00421 |
238 |
0 |
237 |
1 |
14 |
we all seem to have one eye |
2.0000 |
0.00434 |
231 |
0 |
231 |
0 |
15 |
My security system has a few glitches. |
2.0000 |
0.00749 |
134 |
0 |
134 |
0 |
16 |
I couldn't afford a fitbit. |
2.0000 |
0.00554 |
181 |
0 |
181 |
0 |
17 |
Mental note. Don’t say “bite me”to a literalsaurus. |
2.0000 |
0.00583 |
172 |
0 |
172 |
0 |
18 |
My wife got a matching bracelet. |
2.0000 |
0.01067 |
133 |
1 |
131 |
1 |
19 |
Frankly he hasn't grasped the concept of 'heel' yet. |
1.9960 |
0.00402 |
249 |
1 |
248 |
0 |
20 |
I can't wait until they invent a leash. |
1.9958 |
0.00418 |
240 |
1 |
239 |
0 |
21 |
He's still teething. He'll evolve out of it. |
1.9958 |
0.00418 |
240 |
1 |
239 |
0 |
22 |
These new ankle monitors are barely noticeable |
1.9955 |
0.00451 |
222 |
1 |
221 |
0 |
23 |
Some extictions can't come soon enough. |
1.9951 |
0.00491 |
204 |
1 |
203 |
0 |
24 |
Nothing much, what's up with you two? |
1.9921 |
0.00791 |
127 |
1 |
126 |
0 |
25 |
He's been extinct for 65 million years so I'm just as surprised to see him as you are. |
1.9908 |
0.00647 |
218 |
2 |
216 |
0 |
26 |
The wife wanted a dog, but those won’t be domesticated for another 3,000 years. |
1.9907 |
0.00656 |
215 |
2 |
213 |
0 |
27 |
No, go without me I shouldn't ignore this gnawing feeling. |
1.9900 |
0.01005 |
100 |
1 |
99 |
0 |
28 |
The teething is killing me. |
1.9897 |
0.00727 |
194 |
2 |
192 |
0 |
29 |
I brought him home to eat, but I think he misunderstood. |
1.9861 |
0.00979 |
144 |
2 |
142 |
0 |
30 |
It was a lot cuter as a puppy |
1.9854 |
0.01028 |
137 |
2 |
135 |
0 |
31 |
He's been clingy ever since that asteroid last week. |
1.9706 |
0.02985 |
34 |
1 |
33 |
0 |
32 |
The fines don’t even cover feeding the ankle monitor... |
1.9706 |
0.02985 |
34 |
1 |
33 |
0 |
33 |
I didn't mind so much when he was smaller. |
1.9649 |
0.02459 |
57 |
2 |
55 |
0 |
34 |
Right now we're both trying the Paleo thing. |
1.9565 |
0.03040 |
46 |
2 |
44 |
0 |
35 |
It's my fault. I told him never to bite strangers. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
36 |
An anachronism would be better than a dog, I thought. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
37 |
He gets so clingy during hibernation season. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
38 |
I'm under house arrest! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
39 |
This cave could have cost me an arm and a leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
40 |
Don't worry, he doesn't really use his teeth. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
41 |
Judge says I have to wear it for six months and can’t leave the cave. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
42 |
He does get a bit nippy at times. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
43 |
The tax collector is starting to really clamp down. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
44 |
That's my personal ball and chain. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
45 |
It's the latest in house arrest homing devices for offenders who need to get a grip. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
46 |
Acupuncture. It's the latest healing trend. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
47 |
Thank goodness he's a leg guy. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
48 |
Meteor showers make Dino so insecure. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
49 |
Well, that's one less mouth to feed. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
50 |
I do wish he'd make up his mind. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
51 |
Didn’t you guys read the invite? It’s formal only. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
52 |
I'm still working on the concept, but I want to call it an anklet. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
53 |
What do you mean don't worry? What do you mean "bark"? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
54 |
He gets really attached when I have guests over! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
55 |
We're Creationists. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
56 |
A herbivore, the hell he is. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
57 |
I ran out of Iguanadon biscuits. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
58 |
Sorry, I can't hunt and gather with you today. This ankle monitor does't come off until next week. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
59 |
I’d be in jail now if it weren’t for my ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
60 |
I'm under house arrest and this is my ankle monitor, Gronk. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
61 |
I wonder what they're putting in pet food these days... |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
62 |
Imprinting? I have a different word for it! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
63 |
Love goes where my Rosemary goes |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
64 |
Yes, it’s a rare form of Reactive Attachment Disorder. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
65 |
I found him down by the river. Actually, he found me. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
66 |
I don't think we are in Arkansas anymore. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
67 |
I see your pet has developed a taste for me. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
68 |
Hunting with a conscience takes a personal commitment. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
69 |
This is a new liberated prisoner monitoring device that we are trying out. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
70 |
He is way more affectionate now compared to when I first picked him out at the pound. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
71 |
He loves my ankles |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
72 |
As you might have surmised, not the answer to life. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
73 |
Enlightenment is two peaks over. This is posture. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
74 |
At least I didn't get real jail time. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
75 |
Me have idea for bear trap. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
76 |
It looks worse than it is m. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
77 |
Yeah, but the judge says I can stay out of jail if I wear it until the trial starts. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
78 |
The car's totaled, and jaws of life my ass. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
79 |
My husband is such a control freak. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
80 |
Steggie has separation issues. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
81 |
He's still evolving as a watchdog. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
82 |
My husband likes to play fetch with us. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
83 |
I would really like to go out but, I'm dragging. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
84 |
I should buy more prosthetic legs on Black Friday! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
85 |
I've eaten muffins and lasagna every day of my life, and I feel terrible. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
86 |
House arrest still beats prison. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
87 |
I swear she's box trained |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
88 |
Will he draw me on the wall? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
89 |
The previous owner suffered from paranoia. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
90 |
He’s causing my anxiety of not becoming separated! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
91 |
Ouch! Ouch? It's a new word but an appropirate one. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
92 |
Is this Codependents Anonymous? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
93 |
In these times, core stability is bliss. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
94 |
The shelter says he has separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.02667 |
38 |
38 |
0 |
0 |
95 |
the first person to become a Leg end |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
96 |
I'd love to join you, but Trixie hates to be left home alone. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
97 |
I'd never recommend adopting a Attachosaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
98 |
Don't worry, Mom. I've got an extra one. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
99 |
It is totally domesticated. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
100 |
My lawyer said it’s this or go to prison |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
101 |
He followed me home. Let's eat him. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
102 |
It's an Anklebracelodon. The judge ordered me to wear him during my parole. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
103 |
he's still cutting his teeth |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
104 |
You should try it. It’s very exfoliating. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
105 |
He always tells me we are inseparable |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
106 |
I told you he ate my homework. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
107 |
Got pulled over on the mammoth for a DWI |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
108 |
What lizard? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
109 |
I still prefer cave-arrest to the alternative. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
110 |
I like my ankle bracelet, but looking forward to the trial. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
111 |
I guess I should a Stegosautus whisperer before he grows up. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
112 |
I should’ve tried to domesticate a bird first. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
113 |
Amazing. Just last week he was a vegetarian. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
114 |
My experience suggests that house arrest is not as preferable as it sounds. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
115 |
ever since I killed his mother to have her for my family’s dinner last week, he has latched on to me & won’t let go. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
116 |
Who is your home security company? One of a few that offer services with some teeth to it. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
117 |
3 weeks house arrest is not bad for underage clubbing. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
118 |
"Shake a leg, Erma; let's get going!: |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
119 |
I just got an idea about how to trap that big furry animal. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
120 |
He has attachment issue |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
121 |
He gets bored when I come home late. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
122 |
Thanks for coming over. Harry's a beast when he's sick; I just couldn't get away. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
123 |
So, how's the pet training going? |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
124 |
Ths will be my last rescue dragon... |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
125 |
It's better than Rikers. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
126 |
It’s the newest model of home confinement ankle bracelets. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
127 |
This is rather uncomfortable, it would be dashing if one of you chaps can help with the amelioration of my predicament. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
128 |
He tried going vegan for a week. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
129 |
...he followed me all the way home from school! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
130 |
yes, he's cute, good company, the kids like him but overall I would't recommend getting one. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
131 |
And I call this invention the ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
132 |
You should try to catch up. It's the latest in house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
133 |
He'll sit and watch Hannibal Lector movies for hours. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
134 |
Believe me now or hear me later, girls: cave arrest sucks. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
135 |
I am under house arrest and I have wear this ankle monitor the whole time. It really bites. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
136 |
Cave arrest, just til my foot falls off. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
137 |
Would someone hurry up and invent the ball already? |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
138 |
Don't worry, it's just the way she shows her affection. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
139 |
It's an ankle monitor. The judge gave me three months of house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
140 |
It's called an anklet... |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
141 |
Sorry guys, the wife’s got me under house arrest again. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
142 |
I was told this would cure my warts. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
143 |
My initial aim was to make boots |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
144 |
They call him "cave arrest." |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
145 |
I'm under house arrest, this is my ankle Monitor Lizard. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
146 |
He's not very bright, but at least he doesn't shed. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
147 |
Well, this won’t feel good in the morning. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
148 |
i know, the wife still has me under house arrest! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
149 |
She‘s such a footie. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
150 |
He's angry because he found out he is our main course for our holiday dinner! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
151 |
The Judge got mad and order I wear an ankle bracelet |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
152 |
It's not the best mouser I've ever had. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
153 |
It’s what everybody’s wearing. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
154 |
The good news is I got my parole. I just have to wear this ankle monitor for the next three months! |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
155 |
If he goes, I go. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
156 |
He was only a foster, but we grew so attached. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
157 |
Yes, he’s been vaccinated. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
158 |
But you only said that I couldn't get a tattoo on my ankle. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
159 |
Inventing fire seemed much easier than domesticating pets. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
160 |
I've raised him since he chewed his way out of my roommate's chest. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
161 |
It’s an Ankle-iSaw |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
162 |
The vet said it’s separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
163 |
Sorry, I can't go out, my ankle monitor will go off |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
164 |
It's part of my probation restrictions. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
165 |
I got it at the artisanal butcher. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
166 |
Now, Janet from HR will see you |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
167 |
It's a condition of my probation. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
168 |
My new invention, I call it the Denver boot. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
169 |
But he was a rescue and already cave trained. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
170 |
Not fake news, not fake news...You are my witness. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
171 |
I was trying to teach it to kneel |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
172 |
It's a chair for me and a toy for the goats, I love Amazon. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
173 |
I just wish he would switch legs once in a while. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
174 |
He must smell my Triceratops. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
175 |
It's the goddamn mortgage lender. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
176 |
House arrest 101 |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
177 |
His obedience trainer says his behavior will evolve over time. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
178 |
It's not what you think... I dragged him here. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
179 |
See what happens when you feed her table scraps? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
180 |
He likes me. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
181 |
Can you bring me the stegosaurus treats, please? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
182 |
He just followed me home - can we keep him? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
183 |
We knew our marriage would raise eyebrows but who knew she'd be so possessive. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
184 |
I'll tell you ladies in a few years these "Ankle Biters" will be all the rage! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
185 |
Cup of tea? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
186 |
He's my therapy reptile. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
187 |
And to think, just last week the cat had his tongue. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
188 |
I need to invent another way to say “mind me.” |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
189 |
perhaps if you guys try scratching his back ! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
190 |
He finds my independence threatening. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
191 |
I think I forgot to feed him today. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
192 |
On the bright side, he's stopped chewing on the stalagmites. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
193 |
He's just started Obedience School. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
194 |
They make all the pledges do it mom, don't worry. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
195 |
It didn't like the look in my eye. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
196 |
I have something to tell you... |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
197 |
As I understand it, if she drags me back to her cave, she'll claim me as her man. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
198 |
House arrest really isn't as bad as I thought it would be. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
199 |
We haven’t had him long but he’s aleady so attached to me. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
200 |
If I leave the cave, it alerts my parole officer. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
201 |
It has to go out in order to be cave trained |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
202 |
She can't seem to let go of me. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
203 |
I'll this one "Leggosaurus" |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
204 |
when I tried ti leave the all/night bar, someting snapped. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
205 |
When does his species goes extinct? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
206 |
It's OK, I'm attached to him. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
207 |
Someone call 911 |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
208 |
I couldn’t post enough rocks for bail so they made me wear an ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
209 |
I tell ya, cave arrest isn’t really all that bad. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
210 |
It is what it is. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
211 |
From beyond the grave, Winston Churchill is screaming at the two bystanders, "An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last." |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
212 |
Unsuccesful early Poodle prototypes. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
213 |
They were out of alligator shoes. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
214 |
Call me Ishmael! |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
215 |
are you sure he's not pulling your leg? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
216 |
You guys wanna try too? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
217 |
We’re sticking with Dog |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
218 |
He's really very friendly and nice to have around |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
219 |
Oh yeah, it's way cool. Got it on E-Bay. Amazon was sold out |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
220 |
I wish I could go. But I'm on house arrest until criminal justice reform becomes a thing. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
221 |
I chose the ankle monitor over being dragged and clubbed. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
222 |
I'm hoping it will evolve into something soft and cuddly. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
223 |
I forgot the password to our alarm system. The third time this week this has happened. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
224 |
Housebroken. Guards cave. Give you cheap. Did I say housebroken? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
225 |
Yeah right, your T-rex doesn't bite, that's what they all say until it does. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
226 |
I’m on cave arrest for two months. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
227 |
It's only his deep seated letting go issues. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
228 |
I told him to heel but I think he heard meal |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
229 |
This is only a prototype; I'm convinced there's a market for a smaller anklet. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
230 |
There are still some bugs to work out of this 'alligator shoes' idea. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
231 |
The pet store said he was a herbivore. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
232 |
You'll hardly notice him after a while." |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
233 |
Harold suffers from separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
234 |
A little aggravation now, a lot of meat for the winter later. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
235 |
Once he evolves, he’ll be more chicken |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
236 |
He just wants my undivided attention. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
237 |
The pet experts say that whether it's poop on the floor or an amputated leg, its your fault not the bloodosuarus's. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
238 |
It's part of my plea agreement; If I go any further than twenty feet from my cave opening, he'll eat me. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
239 |
This is the thanks I get for being Vegan. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
240 |
House arrest isn't so bad. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
241 |
It's ok. It's his way of showing affection. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
242 |
It bit me so hard I'm seeing single. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
243 |
It's just a phase, he'll evolve out of it soon. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
244 |
Sorry, but we're dino-ing in tonight. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
245 |
His psychoanalyst suggested avoiding eye contact. Could you please avert your eyes? |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
246 |
"I can't wait until they invent dino kindergarten". |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
247 |
I think we need to invent WD40, he squeaks. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
248 |
I'm attempting to come-up with a demeaning and very biased Trump cartoon. Seems there is one or two in every 'New Yorker'. Give it a rest! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
249 |
He's robotic. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
250 |
Yeah, six months house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
251 |
Can I get you a drink or should we just have a bite? |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
252 |
He's a rescue animal. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
253 |
Claims he's been to the future and that this move will evolve into something called a bear trap. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
254 |
Looks like they put me on house arrest again. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
255 |
All the kids are doing it. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
256 |
How come it took you two so long to get here? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
257 |
Don't mind him. He's just feeling a little insecure. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
258 |
My man says it's called "Denver boot." When I asked for leather boots for Winter Solstice, I was expecting something else. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
259 |
Come in, he is very friendly -- he's just acting up to impress you. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
260 |
Don't worry, the ambulance will be here in a couple of millennia |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
261 |
In a hundred and fifty thousand years this will all make sense |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
262 |
It is cave man style. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
263 |
Sorry, guys. Ankle bracelet for 90 days. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
264 |
My attorney says I’ll only have to wear it til my appeal |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
265 |
He says he will let go when he becomes extinct, not before. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
266 |
Damned if I do a cave painting of him! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
267 |
Until today everyone thought it was extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
268 |
If it wasn't an anachronism, I'd give him a chew toy. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
269 |
Have you considered a slip collar? |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
270 |
Luckily, the ankle monitor comes off next week. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
271 |
Son, there's something wrong with your girlfriend. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
272 |
He just learned that dinosaurs are extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
273 |
Ever since I got bitten by the neighbor’s T-Rex, he doesn’t want me to leave. First world problems, right? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
274 |
He's only two! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
275 |
It's her way of relating. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
276 |
We were told he would be a great door stop, whatever that is. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
277 |
We have to find a better way of getting food. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
278 |
It's an expression of endearment. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
279 |
I'm going to take Rex out for his evening limp. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
280 |
I get this ankle monitor lizard off in three months for good behavior. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
281 |
Guess we caught our meal of the day |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
282 |
No worries Norm. He will go extinct soon. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
283 |
When he asked to be my pet I said he must be pulling my leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
284 |
The Humane Society and police are experimenting with a new ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
285 |
"He's a rescue dinosaur". |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
286 |
I can't complain, we won't be going on walks for a while. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
287 |
He finally latched on. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
288 |
I just know that someday the police will develop a better ankle bracelet.. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
289 |
I chose house arrest over incarceration. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
290 |
We’re still negotiating the roommate agreement. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
291 |
I'm so over this 'pets' craze. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
292 |
I followed him home -- can he keep me? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
293 |
We got the little fella at the petting zoo, really cheap! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
294 |
I don't mind. It soothes her anxiety! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
295 |
And he just graduated from Ceasar’s Training school! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
296 |
No, it is not a friendly dinopet. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
297 |
It's not so bad, ... you get used to him and besides I'm losing weight just dragging him around. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
298 |
When I asked for the ankle bracelet monitoring option I had no idea how much harder it would be. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
299 |
I asked to see something in an alligator boot, but this is the only thing they had. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
300 |
My doctor said my condition was 'the heartbreak of psoriasisaurus' and that with the right creams, it should go away in a couple of days. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
301 |
Legadillo? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
302 |
The council put me on house arrest for poaching. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
303 |
As you can see, this scissor is defective... |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
304 |
I’m never stepping foot in his man cave again. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
305 |
He gets upset when I walk upright. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
306 |
I'm telling you...I really think crocodile will be "in" this season. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
307 |
He's still got some problems, but at least he's house-broken. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
308 |
They'll be easier to remove after they've involved into ticks. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
309 |
He doesn't break my skin. He loves me so much he won't let go. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
310 |
Did you bring the ham ? I've got the green egg. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
311 |
Cave arrest for rock market manipulation... |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
312 |
I still think it's better than fire. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
313 |
Oh, he's teething - hurts him more than me. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
314 |
Apparently “caveman’s best friend” is the best evolution can do so far. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
315 |
It's my court ordered cave confinement device. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
316 |
That's rover. Don't mind him, he's just going thru his 'teething' stage. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
317 |
Why didn't you just get a dog? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
318 |
Sorry i’m late , I was booted in one of those new “no clubbing zones” |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
319 |
Yeah, house arrest for another week. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
320 |
You know what a new pet is like. It chews on everything. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
321 |
You'll have to be careful, we've got a couple little ankle-biters running around the house |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
322 |
I see now he wants to be adopted but coming here, thought he was pulling my leg. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
323 |
He's like an ankle bracelet, but I still can't leave the cave. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
324 |
There just has to be a better way to catch them. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
325 |
Can't join you, I have to wear this monitor lizard until my house arrest is up. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
326 |
I can't go walking with you today, I have a sore ankle. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
327 |
Cave confinement. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
328 |
I know you said no returns, could we make a deal? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
329 |
I'm under house arrest, that's why. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
330 |
Only one more week of this house arrest! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
331 |
How well it matches your outfit! It's definitely THE accessory this season |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
332 |
Eureka! Let's create a ball and chain! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
333 |
It has nothing to do with the meaning of life. It's just more comfortable than sitting on rocks. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
334 |
As soon as veterinary science is invented, he's going for a checkup. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
335 |
they're finally making these ankle monitors a lot smaller |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
336 |
We had a minor disagreement over house training. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
337 |
You two take positions on each side of the road, and act natural. Dino and I will take care of the rest. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
338 |
I have to wear it. I'm under Cave-Arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
339 |
Chompers replaced the bouncers. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
340 |
So far, he's bitten off more than he can chew. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
341 |
Cave arrest never gets lonely with the ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
342 |
The judge put an ankle monitor lizard on me until my trial. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
343 |
He's really friendly. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
344 |
We are still training him. He's a rescue dinosaur. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
345 |
He might just be teasing. He either winked or blinked. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
346 |
It saves buying a razor, but it's not quite as smooth. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
347 |
Well, at least he's had his incantations. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
348 |
Chief said I must have this attached for 3 moons, due to the "fish incident". |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
349 |
It's how he let's me know that he is hungry. I don't have much time. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
350 |
I hope you brought something to eat. I think he's hungry. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
351 |
I better stay in, Steggie needs me today. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
352 |
You have to suffer for your art. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
353 |
Honey, don't you think its time to get that looked at |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
354 |
after 2017 i'll fucking take it :/ |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
355 |
Don’t worry. My companion dinosaur likes visitors. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
356 |
This house arrest thing really sucks. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
357 |
He has separation anxiety complex. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
358 |
Don't worry... He won't bite. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
359 |
I call it Lassie. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
360 |
I'm teaching him to "Heel" by successive approximation. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
361 |
So sorry, honestly, this is the first time, he’s always great with strangers. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
362 |
Since it's in season I thought why not prepare it with my own infusion. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
363 |
You say goodbye, I say hello |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
364 |
My bad, I knew I shouldn’t have read him a story about cave men. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
365 |
The Cave Lizard Whisperer says its okay to let him nibble. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
366 |
He still has trouble with the 'fetch' command. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
367 |
Check out my electronic tagosaurus! |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
368 |
I call it a dinodoodle. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
369 |
I said "needs to be domesticated...not Domesticathesaurus". |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
370 |
Prehistoric house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
371 |
Sorry, I can't go out. I'm on strict house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
372 |
Can't leave cave for three suns. Too much fire water and wheel rolling. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
373 |
Our new alarm system just passed its test. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
374 |
At least I don't have to remember where I parked it. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
375 |
I didn't think the first step to domestication would be quite this painful |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
376 |
He has severe separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
377 |
At my age it's just nice to be wanted. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
378 |
House arrest is such a drag. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
379 |
We're finding he's only somewhat domesticated for a designer blend...they called him a "Raptor Stega-doodle." |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
380 |
My insurance doesn't cover prehistoric conditions. |
1.0000 |
0.00026 |
3829 |
3829 |
0 |
0 |
381 |
I'm not avoiding you, it just that these house arrest ankle bracelets make it difficult to get around. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
382 |
OH! You stepped in one of those self gnawing traps!? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
383 |
He’s just showin’ his love. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
384 |
Ladies, I've invented the alligator shoe. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
385 |
. . . and then I jumped on a TRex to try to escape but the cops had me cornered. Dude! You do not want to drink too much of that fermented purple liquid stuff! |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
386 |
I can't come, I'm under court ordered cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
387 |
He likes me. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
388 |
Can you lend me a leg to stand on. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
389 |
I told her we needed to start seeing other people. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
390 |
He thinks the drawing makes him look fat. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
391 |
Don’t worry its a herbivore |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
392 |
Do you think I need to buy an extra seat in coach? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
393 |
It might release me if you give it a leg of lamb. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
394 |
I have to wear this until my bail hearing. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
395 |
They generally make good pets, but I think he’s evolving into a carnivore. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
396 |
Calm assertive energy is the energy you project to show your pet you are the Pack Leader. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
397 |
One good thing about these parasites is that they’re very detectable. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
398 |
We're having a problem coëxisting. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
399 |
WebMD said it's callled Gout. I just don't know. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
400 |
I told him the Jurassic was over, but he just wouldn't let go! |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
401 |
They told me he was housebroken. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
402 |
Fine. So I'm a little attached to her. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
403 |
We're having a bit of lockjaw. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
404 |
He suffers from separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
405 |
I'm a yogi, not a guru. Google it. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
406 |
I'm on house trained arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
407 |
... rodents of unusual size. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
408 |
I'd say something funny but he ate my caption. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
409 |
Hey, thanks for visiting me while I'm on probation. I can't leave the cave since I got this ankle monitor, and yeah, it's been pretty lonely. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
410 |
The leeches didn't seem to be working for me. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
411 |
His favorite treat is Legos. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
412 |
I told you getting a pet from the shelter wasn't a good idea. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
413 |
Dinner's going to be a bit longer than I said. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
414 |
Hey, no one said looking good was easy |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
415 |
He wants to know if I can come over for dinner. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
416 |
I hate this darn ankle monitor. Let me into the cave, I think he eats bats. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
417 |
On a whim, I thought I'd teach him how to "follow." |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
418 |
I never should have listened to you about the Dino Whisperer |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
419 |
It's not as bad as it looks. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
420 |
Don’t mind him; he’s just mad I took away his T-Rex bone. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
421 |
She just loves chewing my leg, but it's just one of those friendly gestures between us girls. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
422 |
Don't worry he won't bite you... hard. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
423 |
He really wants me to stay home tonight. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
424 |
Don't wait for me ! I need to fix my cave alarm. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
425 |
Rover doesn't like his petroglyphs. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
426 |
I’m about to invent a word, OUCH! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
427 |
Unfortunately the dinopoodle won't be domesticated for a few centuries. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
428 |
The training is going well - so far he's learned 'heel.' |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
429 |
Ever since the election he won't let me go out. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
430 |
He's a rescue pup so I'm not sure I should train. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
431 |
Oh for the days of a ball and chain |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
432 |
I've been sandaled for my unpaid tickets. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
433 |
I had enough. We should buy a real pacifier for our baby pet. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
434 |
I'm selling Cutco cutlery while working toward my Anthropology Masters Degree. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
435 |
Sorry, I’ll have to cancel movie night ... separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
436 |
I thought I'd shed some light on my "failure to launch." |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
437 |
He needs chewables other than me. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
438 |
This is just his way of telling us he wants his dinner. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
439 |
I taught him to heal. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
440 |
I'm afraid I'll have to call a sub for today's bridge game |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
441 |
My parole officer says I wear it for all six months of house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
442 |
Thats it?! All you need is a green ball?!!!! |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
443 |
There was no warning on the label. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
444 |
He's not fully trained yet. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
445 |
Cave canem. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
446 |
He's court-ordered for a year, but you get used to it pretty quick. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
447 |
My vegetarianism is not reciprocated. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
448 |
Good news.......it's not extinct! |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
449 |
There may be some lingering resentment. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
450 |
He says his owner is some guy named Sanders. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
451 |
I call it a sock gator. Next, I will invent socks. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
452 |
He's really helpful with late night munchies. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
453 |
He does this when he's hungry |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
454 |
"Oh, it's just a mild personality disorder". |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
455 |
Got a grant for a new study I call Domestication - it's my first day! |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
456 |
He’s a rescue. He came this way. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
457 |
If we all close our eyes will this not be real? |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
458 |
He has separation anxiety and food aggression. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
459 |
It’s the latest GPS tracking device! |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
460 |
Pity...the rabies vaccine won't be available for centuries |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
461 |
I now regret inventing the anklet. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
462 |
But he purrs so sweetly! |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
463 |
Can you imagine a society where each person chips in a little bit so that everyone is covered when this happens? |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
464 |
I was told alligator was "in" this season. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
465 |
I hope you have health insurance |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
466 |
After awhile you get used to it. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
467 |
Unfortunately the vicious reptile jaw extractor tool has not yet been invented. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
468 |
I delivered the mail to his cave at 10:00 AM and had to drag him the whole rest of my route. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
469 |
It was a double dinosaur dare. What else was I supposed to do? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
470 |
I thought that he was with you? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
471 |
He's only completed the intermediate obedience class. We have the advanced class next week. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
472 |
It's new. I call it "petulant." Pet, for short. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
473 |
Isn't he cute?! We're really attached below the hip! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
474 |
Mom, Dad, may keep him - he's really attached to me? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
475 |
The shelter said its separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
476 |
I met someone this morning during my daily swim at the club. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
477 |
Yup, the ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
478 |
No jail time but I have six more months with the ankle monitor lizard |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
479 |
You've got a great game concept here, but next time try throwing a stick instead. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
480 |
He isn't yet cave-broken. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
481 |
What would Fred Flintstone have done? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
482 |
We're still hoping he'll evolve into a cat. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
483 |
These new lizard shoes are uncomfortable at first but very stylish. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
484 |
Her coach is working with her on her separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
485 |
It’s so I don’t skip bail. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
486 |
Tribunal order. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
487 |
It’s a monitor for my house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
488 |
The upside is that he leaves my shoes alone. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
489 |
He's anxious whenever I leave the cave... |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
490 |
He followed me home from school. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
491 |
I said it's 'crunch time' - Shake a leg, will ya?! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
492 |
It’s a little awkward, but at-home monitoring sure beats the alternative. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
493 |
I don't think I'm in real danger until did I don't think I'm in real danger until it digests Marvin. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
494 |
It was this or Rikers. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
495 |
I'm trying out a new symbiotic relationship. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
496 |
You wouldn't believe how cute it used to be. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
497 |
The judge gave me 30 days cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
498 |
So, sourpuss...what's biting you? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
499 |
Your messenger got a hold of us but we have to kill him. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
500 |
The Elders put this thing on me until the council meeting next week. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
501 |
He self identifies as canine. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
502 |
He means well. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
503 |
Alice’s separation anxiety was beginning to show. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
504 |
This is what we call ‘disorganized attachment’. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
505 |
Now that your Buffy and Muffy have died off, my Tuffy is getting clingy. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
506 |
Being under "cave arrest" was not as easy as I thought it would be. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
507 |
I'm under house arrest. I get to eat my ankle bracelet when I'm released. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
508 |
He is hinting he wants to be fed |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
509 |
He assures me this will be a breakthrough paleontological discovery in the millenia to come. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
510 |
I can’t seem to shake this tingling sensation in my leg. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
511 |
It was this or six months in prison. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
512 |
Trixie has a touch of stranger anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
513 |
All i said was 'hey presto'. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
514 |
Only 9 months and 17 days till my probation ends -- and not a day too soon. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
515 |
I’m just thankful I don’t have to go through this alone. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
516 |
Porcupineded. Future will know it as 'cuckolded' or ball and chain. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
517 |
They call it attachment parenting. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
518 |
"Sorry I can't go out tonight, I've got to look after the ankle-biter". |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
519 |
Do you think I'll need to have it surgically removed? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
520 |
Have we invented time yet? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
521 |
Socrates didn't warn me about this. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
522 |
I had considered going out with you ladies, but then, I caved! |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
523 |
It's called "cave arrest" mom, and believe me, it's a thousand times better than doing time at the Rock. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
524 |
It's a lot cheaper than a leash. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
525 |
Don't worry, it just separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
526 |
Komodo, and I’ve been draggin’ him around all day. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
527 |
It's a condition of bail. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
528 |
You were right. I should have gotten married. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
529 |
He's really very friendly. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
530 |
Parole's going okay, and next Tuesday I will be able to leave the encampment. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
531 |
We've been working on distraction training. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
532 |
It's an evolving relationship. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
533 |
He does this since Marge left. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
534 |
Okay, I'm sorry I said my ankle-biter is cuter than any in your brood. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
535 |
I'm on house arrest until T. Rex decides what to do with me. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
536 |
Sorry I can't make it out. The old lady has been gnawing at me lately. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
537 |
Welp, I guess I'm stuck here for another year! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
538 |
Sorry, I'm under house arrest and I can't leave my cave |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
539 |
Sorry, he gets possessive around Neanderthals. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
540 |
It was Bound to happen |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
541 |
Yah, years of inbreeding is a problem, but he almost has 'heel' down. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
542 |
It's not Weejuns, but he is very comfortable once you get past the vice grip. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
543 |
And I thought the yapping was gonna get to me! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
544 |
Wait till you see her when she's hungry. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
545 |
This is his idea of a chastity belt. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
546 |
Spike's separation anxiety is a bit challenging! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
547 |
He's a republican... |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
548 |
I've been placed under cave arrest with an ankle monitor that detects tampering. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
549 |
Maybe I won't be able to solve it in my lifetime but I know there's a connection. And if not me, then my son, or another Darwin somewhere down the line, will figure it out... |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
550 |
You said your pet doesn't bite!" "He's not our pet. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
551 |
It still needs to be cooked. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
552 |
Let’s try that wolf we saw at our garbage dump. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
553 |
He's the ankle monitor for my house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
554 |
My mother always said she didn’t like the way he looked at me. But did I listen? I was so flattered that he always complimented me for my beautiful legs. Now I know that he just sees me as a piece of meat. Men can be such beasts! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
555 |
He doesn’t realize that the Paleo diet is just a fad. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
556 |
Thanks for the visit. Being under Cave Arrest is a real pain. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
557 |
I can’t find my leash. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
558 |
It's nothing serious, he just wants a walk |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
559 |
I'm rooting for the meteor. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
560 |
Yeah, he imprinted with me when he was born but now we have a failure to launch! |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
561 |
We got a new security system and we're still trying to figure out how to work it. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
562 |
Oh, don't worry. It's just a nip... |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
563 |
Sorry guys I cant leave, I got six months cave arrest |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
564 |
He's just acting out. His mother was last night's entree. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
565 |
"He's a clinger, but he's house broken". He's a clinger, but he's house broken'. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
566 |
Sorry, I can't today, I'm still on house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
567 |
And he's so playful and cute and I just love him and his name is Phineas. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
568 |
My parole officer is sensitive to social stigma, so he lobbied hard to get me the slim model. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
569 |
What happened to my dog! |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
570 |
He ran out of pterodactyl wings so I guess he's settling for legs now. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
571 |
Ankle biter? No, she has higher aspirations than that. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
572 |
It's my latest invention, the bear trap. Now I just need to invent the bear! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
573 |
This motherhood thing is tough. Little Dino has entered the separation anxiety phase and he's turned me into his permanent object. But it is really nice that you two dropped by to see me. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
574 |
It's only a prototype. I haven't developed an effective release yet. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
575 |
I can't partner with you, I'm already bound by a thorny contract with a binding clause. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
576 |
He’s having difficulty sticking to the Paleo diet. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
577 |
It's supposed to stop me from stealing. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
578 |
It’s just separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
579 |
Oh, don’t mind Buster. He is just in his oral phase. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
580 |
I get the ankle tether off next week. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
581 |
she is a bit possessive |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
582 |
It's ok. He's been chomping at the bit to go outside. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
583 |
It's something new called "House Arrest". |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
584 |
I told him he was extinct! |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
585 |
Yeh ! apparently it's a new law enforcement development, tagging they said. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
586 |
I call him my chief strategist. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
587 |
I'm under house arrest for blowing smoke. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
588 |
He hates it when I go to play Mahjong. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
589 |
Mom and Dad, I promise I'll feed him and rub his scales every day! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
590 |
Sorry I can't join your dinosaur roast...I'm under cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
591 |
You're still not in compliance with the leash law! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
592 |
Just remember that as we head into 2018 our job is still to 'Resist" even if annoying obstacles are encountered from time to time. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
593 |
He's been very attached to me ever since he was weaned. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
594 |
Judge Og gave me three weeks of cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
595 |
We.....well me more than him.....would like to know how to remove an animal whose clamped on to a leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
596 |
My ankylosaurus is teething.” |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
597 |
Her bark is worse than her bite. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
598 |
Honest, he followed me home. Can I keep him? |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
599 |
His bite is much worse than his bark. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
600 |
His has already cost me an arm and a leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
601 |
He's afraid I will leave him alone. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
602 |
In their culture, it's an engagement deposit. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
603 |
Well, at least he's not chewing on the new stone couch anymore. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
604 |
The judge gave me 30 days cave incarceration. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
605 |
He's cave trained well, but won't let me go near the spear. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
606 |
...ankylosaurus monitor, 3 days of parole left. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
607 |
So I avoided jail time, but I gotta be on house arrest for the next 6 months. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
608 |
Don't yell at him, whatever you do. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
609 |
I promised I'd be more tolerant but now I'm not so sure. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
610 |
Next question stupid! |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
611 |
And he calls me a ball and chain! And he calls me a ball and chain! TimothySmith |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
612 |
I don't think Lenny is a herbivore. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
613 |
I haven't been able to take a walk in ages. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
614 |
Just watch: I will train my stegosaurus to behave better than the great leader. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
615 |
And at least we don't have any furniture. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
616 |
I went to Court today and they let me out with an Ankle Bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
617 |
I wanted to leave him at home, but he has attachment issues. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
618 |
I finally got the spot right in front of my cave. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
619 |
He no longer jumps and tries to lick my face. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
620 |
It's in-cave detentiion |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
621 |
They've just invented plastic so your new ankle monitor will probably be more comfortable. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
622 |
He keeps smearing my pictures, but my calves look great. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
623 |
Sometimes we get a little too close to our pets, don't we? |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
624 |
He’s toilet trained, but I haven’t invented a muzzle for him yet. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
625 |
that's a real leg snapper!! |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
626 |
Judge Ogg placed me under cave-detention until the trial. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
627 |
It's OK, I wasn't going anywhere anyway. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
628 |
I thought you said your stegosaurus didn't bite. Oh, it's not your stegosaurus? |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
629 |
and this is my ball and chain..... |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
630 |
Whose turn was it to feed Fido? |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
631 |
The judge said it'll come off in six months if I don't start any more fires. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
632 |
It's my wallet. Just needs a little design work. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
633 |
He just hates it when Mama has to go shopping. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
634 |
Turns out "evolution" is a bit of a hot button. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
635 |
Yeah, he’s still teething, but he’s cave-broken. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
636 |
I'm really hoping the vet was right and he grows out of his teething stage soon |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
637 |
It's called "home detention". |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
638 |
30 years in and he's still in the oral phase... |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
639 |
I can't leave home without him. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
640 |
Honey, please call the exterminator. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
641 |
Look what I found swimming in the holy water. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
642 |
You get used to it, unlike the food in prison. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
643 |
He's a rescue from the past. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
644 |
I thought I had him trained to snare rabbits and foxes but I think he has trouble with species identification. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
645 |
It's my new ankle bracelet |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
646 |
He has seperation anxiety issues. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
647 |
You were the one who taught him fetch bones. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
648 |
I told you not to try petting him! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
649 |
But Mom, you've always told me I'd understand better when I grew up and got my own little ankle-biter. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
650 |
They say it's because of the way I dress. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
651 |
I’ve been assured by the pet monster experts that it’s only a phase. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
652 |
He's housebroken but we have a call in to the dinosaur whisperer. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
653 |
Released under your supervision, Ma. Have to wear this new ankle bracelet... |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
654 |
Wearing this ankle bracelet is a real pain.. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
655 |
They need to teethe when they're infants. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
656 |
They're really cute when they're little. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
657 |
The first known incident of biting commentary. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
658 |
Bought him under the premise this was a mutualistic relationship. So far he's yet to pull his weight. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
659 |
There are two ungrateful dogs I packed. Both are messy, full of feces, love to spew, smell and eat their own excrement. It is time to get them back home at the White House. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
660 |
I believe this cave is occupied. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
661 |
It's called 'house arrest.' |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
662 |
I haven't worked out all the kinks in the domestication-made-easy course I'm taking but they assure me I am headed in the right direction. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
663 |
I just got him yesterday, but he has already become quite attached. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
664 |
Well yes, I do have a problem. Now Gert if you Will hold his lower jaw and Kayla, you grab his snout firmly... |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
665 |
Actually his screech is much worse than his bite |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
666 |
He's a rescue, but really he rescued me. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
667 |
Don't just stand there. Draw something! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
668 |
Well, now I need a rabies shot |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
669 |
She makes me weak in the knees |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
670 |
He reports my movements to the authorities. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
671 |
He’s just an obligate carnivore. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
672 |
The last of her unkind. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
673 |
Mom and Dad, I think I found your sex toy. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
674 |
It's just my court ordered ankle monitor. I'm on parole. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
675 |
Sorry son, we live in a cave, this is the only way to ground you. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
676 |
How did we not survive? Every time I catch one of these tasty things, a couple more of them show up. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
677 |
Fake open-house |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
678 |
We call him our discomfort pet. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
679 |
We met in Jersey. She's very all that and a side of potato salad. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
680 |
We’re aril working on ‘heel’. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
681 |
Please stop telling him to go fetch! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
682 |
When he asked me about Darwin, I answered: "Bite me!" He didn't take it well! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
683 |
They call it “house arrest”. Why don’t they just put us all in the same cave so I can have some company? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
684 |
It's the latest fashion trend. I call it an anklet. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
685 |
The judge said it's this or go to jail. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
686 |
She's very needy. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
687 |
It's fine, I got it bitten by a stegosaurus yesterday. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
688 |
I was “loitering”, apparently it’s called a Sterkfontein Boot. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
689 |
He's a pup, I am hoping he evolves out of his chewing stage. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
690 |
She wants to go out. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
691 |
I was assured he’s an herbivore. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
692 |
We told you to never feed a stray. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
693 |
He has really bad separation anxiety and doesn't want me to leave the cave today. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
694 |
House arrest isn't so bad, but the security bracelet gets in the way sometimes. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
695 |
My doctor says it can come off next week. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
696 |
Usually he's very good but Trump has gotten to him. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
697 |
He was such a cute baby. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
698 |
I call it a "burglar alarm". |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
699 |
"I'm not a Guru, people send me things, apparently I'm an Influencer". |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
700 |
"He wants me to pet him". |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
701 |
I was expecting a floral delivery....Isn't this snapdragon...No?...oh no..... |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
702 |
croc skin anklet sounded smaller |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
703 |
I'm under cave arrest. It was either that, or jail time. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
704 |
how many times do we have to tell you to stop bringing people home. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
705 |
You can call him ugly, but don't ever call him stupid. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
706 |
My lawyer plea bargained me cave arrest for a year in lieu of a stint on Rikers Island. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
707 |
It was either this or cleaning dino doo-doo in Central Park. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
708 |
The court said I have to wear this ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
709 |
I'm sorry...I can't go. He gets painfully jealous if I'm out and about. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
710 |
I thought you said your dog doesn't bite ? |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
711 |
Home confinement, ug. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
712 |
Animal domestication is not what it is cracked up to be! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
713 |
It is something I'm working on..."Alligator shoes" |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
714 |
He's adopting to being adopted! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
715 |
It’s not what it looks like, I’m just into vore now. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
716 |
Unfortunately I come with some past baggage |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
717 |
He follow me home. I can keep? |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
718 |
My trainer says, 'There are no bad dinosaurs, just bad owners.' |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
719 |
Sorry, he has some extinction issues. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
720 |
Sorry guys, still under cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
721 |
Og put it on after my third jaywalking ticket. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
722 |
'House arrest would be so much better with a ankle monitor.' |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
723 |
I'm just relieved he doesn't love my leg anymore. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
724 |
Mommy, Daddy?!? I’ll feed it myself!! Can I keep it? Puleeeze!! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
725 |
I can't go with you now. He wants me to paint his picture on the wall. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
726 |
I guess you will do |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
727 |
We didn't train him to heel correctly. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
728 |
...And if Lulu gives you any trouble while I’m away, just crush her skull with a big rock. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
729 |
I know, but it's gonna be extinguished soon. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
730 |
It will probably take a few more thousand years before I'd really consider him 'domesticated.' |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
731 |
I didn't think she would be so clingy. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
732 |
It’s the old ball and chain... |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
733 |
No - I said my Leg-is-sore-us. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
734 |
Ouch. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
735 |
It's his way of conveying that his separation anxiety is leg-itimate. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
736 |
Bork said no worries, all breeds harmless. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
737 |
You can go get help or we can wait for an asteroid impact. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
738 |
I mentioned my clutch purse and he went berserk! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
739 |
I’ve got him on the Paleo diet. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
740 |
You tell me. All I said was "I need something for my feet from Foot Locker' and up he popped. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
741 |
You said his Jurassic bark was worse than his Jurassic bite! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
742 |
I only got him yesterday, but he is already very attached to me! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
743 |
Don't worry, Lizzie still only has her hatching teeth. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
744 |
Just a couple more weeks of house arrest |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
745 |
I think he loves me. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
746 |
She loves children. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
747 |
If you can make one of these out of iron, I got the name for it. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
748 |
I can't come, I'm under court ordered cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
749 |
What are you looking at? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
750 |
Please tell me that you're pulling my leg... |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
751 |
The judge put me under cave arrest. It has orders to eat me if I try to leave. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
752 |
I can't go tonight, the Court ordered me to 60 days home detention. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
753 |
Has anyone seen my other shoe? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
754 |
He says he won't twist if I just let him stay here for a few days. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
755 |
Mom and Dad, please let me keep him. I promise to feed him everyday. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
756 |
You never know, you should see what John has done with his wolf. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
757 |
Paleolithic House Arrest |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
758 |
We're still working on that 'man's best friend' thing. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
759 |
She makes me wear him so I won't forget our anniversary again. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
760 |
It's an ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
761 |
A prehistoric form of House Arrest |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
762 |
Living with you was no picnic either. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
763 |
He doesn’t want me to leave |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
764 |
When I said I wouldn’t mind having a little ankle-biter around, this isn’t exactly what I had in mind. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
765 |
Finally got him to stop humping my leg, but his codependency still needs some work. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
766 |
He was a rescue Pitbullasaurus |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
767 |
Larry makes me wear it while he's at work cuz he thinks I'll fool around with the new guy two caves down. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
768 |
And I said ‘No, I’m a Male, man.’ |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
769 |
If you guys would’ve alteady invented the leash this could have been avoided. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
770 |
Guess, I should introduce ya to the old' gnaw and chain. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
771 |
Neither the doctor nor the nurse knew a cure for this rare form of foot-and-mouth disease. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
772 |
My wife wanted one of the new security systems that doesn’t have wires all over the cave. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
773 |
Yes. They get a little attached to you. Why do you ask? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
774 |
Bail was reasonable, though. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
775 |
I have to wear this ankle bracelet until the trial |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
776 |
The Judge says I have to wear it for 3 months, but the worst part is remembering to feed it. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
777 |
It’s called up house arrest |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
778 |
Please let me keep her? She has no home, and she's very attached. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
779 |
We are going to need some extra ketchup. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
780 |
I've only had him a week but I've really become attached. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
781 |
The house arrest devices they’re using these days are positively prehistoric. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
782 |
I stole Bolkitchunk's beaver pelts, and now I am in "cave arrest" until we replace them. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
783 |
I'd offer you a seat, but we're having our furniture reupholstered. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
784 |
She's got a bad case of separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
785 |
Come back tomorrow when I'm off house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
786 |
A bit needy, but can I keep him? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
787 |
Just tell my kids not to go into paleontology. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
788 |
You’ve reached the top of the corporate ladder. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
789 |
I know it sounds crazy, but he's the one that rescued me! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
790 |
Something tells me its dinner time.... |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
791 |
Don't worry...he's young and still in the teething stage. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
792 |
They have me under cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
793 |
With a little education, he'll know he's extinct and stop it. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
794 |
For a recent rescue, he’s surprisingly attached to me. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
795 |
Get real, Madge. This ain't Bedrock. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
796 |
It's an ankle monitor. A new thing that they just invented. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
797 |
He bites when he's nervous - he's a rescue. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
798 |
I'm inventing the "pet" concept. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
799 |
So as a hedge trimmer, it still has a few glitches to iron out. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
800 |
Perhaps alligator boots would be more comfortable. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
801 |
Your security system is so primitive. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
802 |
I don't mind being under cave-arrest except for the ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
803 |
I've been placed under house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
804 |
No, really, his bark is worse than his bite |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
805 |
We got him at a shelter but based on the nipping, I think he is part Labrador. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
806 |
No one told me house arrest would be this painful. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
807 |
Home arrest ankle monitor, circa 2000 B.C. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
808 |
I knew the breeder was lying when he said she was a micro-crocodile. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
809 |
It's a velcrosaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
810 |
Fortunately, he's hypoallergenic. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
811 |
I think this means he said yes to the dress. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
812 |
Sorry ladies. I've been under house arrest since our last ladies night out. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
813 |
The poor thing thinks I'm its mother, who it ate. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
814 |
They told me he was a Vegan. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
815 |
Perhaps I should have used the shock collar. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
816 |
The training has been a bit rough. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
817 |
No problem. He is just teething. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
818 |
I sent him to an obedience training school, but he ate the teachers. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
819 |
He either doesn't understand the concept, or he's telling me never again to ask him to play fetch. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
820 |
It's two against one. You barely have a leg to stand on. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
821 |
He already got an eye and an arm from us, this was inevitable. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
822 |
Yes, but do you realize how much a pre-nup would have cost? |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
823 |
What breed? He's a Stego'sore'us. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
824 |
We got him for our daughter, but he follows me everywhere. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
825 |
Rescue pets often have over-attachment issues. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
826 |
The bracelet will be coming off in a month and I'll be off house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
827 |
The vet said we had to change his food. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
828 |
No one will ever need more than 640 kilo-bites. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
829 |
Chief sentenced me to six moons of Cave Confinement. This ankle monitor hurts like hell! |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
830 |
Try yanking his tail. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
831 |
It's better than your alligator shoes! |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
832 |
We should rethink the stegosaurus trap. |
1.0000 |
0.02469 |
41 |
41 |
0 |
0 |
833 |
It's an all-consuming relationship. |
1.0000 |
0.02469 |
41 |
41 |
0 |
0 |
834 |
I have to wear this until the trial. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
835 |
Someday cave pets will only try to bite unwanted guests. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
836 |
Well, house arrest beats jail any day. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
837 |
He was my husband's idea. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
838 |
He's so adorable; I call him my little anklet. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
839 |
I'm only on house arrest for another couple weeks |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
840 |
He’s a rescue and we are working on his separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
841 |
Sorry I cant make it. The old lady's got me in a vise. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
842 |
Sorry, my mom grounded me. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
843 |
I though he was housebroken. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
844 |
Turns out he's more of a hunter, for gatherers. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
845 |
I wanted a new pet ... and it cost me an arm and leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
846 |
Could be worse. Used to twerk. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
847 |
No, we can't just put him in the pot ! |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
848 |
I've become quite attached to her. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
849 |
Yes, he really gets under my skin. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
850 |
My parole officer said I'll get the ankle monitor off soon. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
851 |
My New Year's Resolution was to keep my friends close and my enemies closer. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
852 |
how do you like my new ankle piercing? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
853 |
They put me on house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
854 |
It's okay. He's an herbivore. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
855 |
The judge ruled I'm a flight risk. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
856 |
Where did we put that book on domestication of animals? |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
857 |
This one thinks he's an ankle monitor lizard. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
858 |
I can't hunt triceratops with you fellas…I'm on house arrest! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
859 |
I thought you said your stegosaurus does not bite. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
860 |
What are you knuckleheads looking at? Get him off already! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
861 |
I'll have to join you guys next time. I've got this one ankle-biter holding me... |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
862 |
Go on without me, the ankle is still saur. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
863 |
Alligator shoes - they are the latest thing! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
864 |
Well, its’s not exactly like in “The Shape of Water. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
865 |
Looks like it’s the four of us having coffee this morning. Ever since his retirement, Larry’s developed a severe case of separation anxiety. I can never leave home without him. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
866 |
I deserved the house arrest. But the new ankle bracelet is giving me a gnawing feeling. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
867 |
He’s grown out of the amputation phase |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
868 |
It’s not so bad — just a few months of cave arrest for insider raiding. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
869 |
He's better home protection than our dog. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
870 |
I clearly misunderstood when you invited me to dinner and asked if I was a white meat or dark meat kind of guy. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
871 |
I’d love to go but, house arrest really bites. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
872 |
"What 'tiny Stegosaurus'"? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
873 |
My cousin is visiting. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
874 |
So this is where "break a leg" came from... hmm. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
875 |
Do you know anybody who lost a pet? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
876 |
He worries about abandonment |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
877 |
Not to worry. The pet shop said he’s an herbivore. |
1.0000 |
0.02740 |
37 |
37 |
0 |
0 |
878 |
I'd say the latest insect repellent is a bust! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
879 |
what you are seeing is love at first bite! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
880 |
I’m sorry. I cannot go. I’m under house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
881 |
First she ate my dear Lisa, then she followed me home. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
882 |
We were fooled by his very small paws. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
883 |
Sorry, can't go. House arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
884 |
Fortunately he‘s not as savage as the saber-tooth cat we used to have. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
885 |
Yeah, he got very emotional when listened “I’ll follow him” for the first time! |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
886 |
Do you think my Jurassic ankle bracelet is too much? |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
887 |
I taught him to fetch, but forgot we haven't invented the ball yet. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
888 |
It’s my house arrest bracelet |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
889 |
Looks like we'll be dining in tonight. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
890 |
Either he goes extinct or I do. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
891 |
He has separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
892 |
This "pet thing" is a bad idea. He's back to being dinner tonight. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
893 |
He's not cave trained yet. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
894 |
I’m under cave arrest – thus, the ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
895 |
Sorry, I'm under house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
896 |
Don't worry, he's all bite. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
897 |
It’ll cost an arm and a leg to keep him. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
898 |
I think with a little patience our descendants will have a house pet. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
899 |
It’s the latest in bone therapy |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
900 |
We've grown quite attached to one another. |
1.0000 |
0.02740 |
37 |
37 |
0 |
0 |
901 |
No, our stegapoo didn’t eat your terrierdactyl. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
902 |
We can't find a chewy toy. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
903 |
I'm re-thinking my 'Domesticated Animal' concept. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
904 |
Do not worry! He knows his survival depends on mine!! |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
905 |
Wanna come for a bite? |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
906 |
Two more weeks of house arrest and the ankle bracelet come off. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
907 |
Oh, just a little ankle bracelet I picked up on the Amazon. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
908 |
I can't go right now. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
909 |
Maybe it's time to see a doctor about this pain in my leg. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
910 |
See, he’s not vicious, just clingy. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
911 |
He voted for Trump and still claims he has no regrets! |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
912 |
This is my tax lien. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
913 |
He is an Ankylosaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
914 |
I know. But the vet said just 2 cans a day 'til he's eight feet. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
915 |
The judge called it a monitor lizzard. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
916 |
It's a real crap shoot when you adopt a rescue egg. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
917 |
So the judge said I can't leave my cave or remove the ankle bracelet! |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
918 |
He never barked. I doubt it's worse than his bite |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
919 |
The mayor is getting serious about parking. How much to get this boot off. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
920 |
I’m bored to tears with this house arrest and don’t even get me started on the ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
921 |
At least he doesn't eat much. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
922 |
It was either this ankle bracelet or jail. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
923 |
It's the next big thing in ankle bracelets. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
924 |
Don't worry he doesn't bite? |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
925 |
I was trying to teach him to "heel." |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
926 |
We adopted him from the local no-kill shelter. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
927 |
They believe the aggressiveness is an result of improbably remote genetic combinations. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
928 |
I really like your new place, but you might want to do something about the giant lizards. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
929 |
I can't leave the house, but at least I don't have to go to prison. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
930 |
I call it an ankle bracelet. You think it will catch on? |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
931 |
But he followed me home........ |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
932 |
I just told him I was bringing him home for dinner. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
933 |
The theoretical consensus is that they are extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
934 |
It's time to kill all these dinosaurs, once and for all. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
935 |
It's not what you think. It's not the proverbial ball and chain. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
936 |
He has a funny way of telling me it's time to eat. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
937 |
He's eaten all the furniture. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
938 |
The Vet says it's only separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
939 |
He does this every time guests ring the cave bell |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
940 |
Do you have any salt? |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
941 |
So yeah, I've got house arrest for 7 months. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
942 |
He's doing well at obedience school. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
943 |
He's very possessive. If I can just get him to let go of my leg, I think he'll make a great cave-pet! |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
944 |
He's part-terrier, part-tyrannosaur. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
945 |
I forgot to disengage the security system again. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
946 |
I'm on home monitoring. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
947 |
But his species IS predisposed to domestication, genetically speaking. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
948 |
Me call it 'domastication.' |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
949 |
He came with the cave, and sufferes from separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
950 |
Sure, house arrest sounds great but the ankle bracelet really bites. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
951 |
It takes him a little while to loosen up. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
952 |
And that's the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth! |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
953 |
Mom. Dad. Only time will tell if Chloe and I were meant to be. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
954 |
Do you know of a good Dinosaur Whisperer? |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
955 |
They said they're sending thoughts and prayers. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
956 |
I screamed 'asteroid' three times, but it didn't flinch. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
957 |
Mom, dad can I keep him? |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
958 |
I appreciate the lighter sentence, but this ankle monitor is quite restrictive |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
959 |
FUCKIN OW |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
960 |
I'm on cave arrest for a DWI (Dinnosauring While Intoxicated). |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
961 |
Yeah, they let me out until my trial. All I have to do is stay home with this monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
962 |
This new thing called house arrest is not as nice as you might think. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
963 |
Sorry I can't make it. I'm under cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
964 |
One date and he won't let me go anywhere alone.... |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
965 |
I can take it off as soon as I'm acquitted. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
966 |
he's having separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
967 |
I'm having the Beast Whisperer come by to work with him. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
968 |
I can't go anywhere without the old ball and chain. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
969 |
Yeah, he's my best friend till some new species comes along. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
970 |
It's called a "shoe". It hurts like hell, but I think it looks great! |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
971 |
Don't worry. He doesn't bark. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
972 |
They placed me on cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
973 |
According to my parole officer, they’re beta testing an electronic version linked to GPS. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
974 |
Ankle bracelets are the new thing. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
975 |
Hi guys, sorry I wish I could go. I'm under cave arrest. If I leave my bracasaur has me for dinner. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
976 |
I avoided jail time, but have to be monitored 24 hours a day. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
977 |
I'm training him to be a service dinosaur. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
978 |
The doctor says that if I apply a little ointment, it should go away. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
979 |
I didn't hear a bark, but it can't be worse than the bite. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
980 |
He's all-American and wants to make us great again. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
981 |
He followed me home: clan we keep him if he doesn’t eat me? |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
982 |
My parole hearing is next week. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
983 |
These new GOP tax liens have teeth. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
984 |
You should hear the racket it makes if I try to leave the cave. It'll come off after the trial. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
985 |
She loves children. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
986 |
When he gets bigger, I'll probably feed him the River People. |
1.0000 |
0.02469 |
41 |
41 |
0 |
0 |
987 |
Justin Timberlake wears the same exact kind. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
988 |
They let me out but I have to wear this until the trial. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
989 |
Can I keep her? |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
990 |
The Origin of Attachment Theory |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
991 |
Believe it or not, it does offer a new perspective to your basic question. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
992 |
Choose the right size, my son. I'm not the first guru on this mountain. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
993 |
I've simply GOT to invent the chew toy. |
1.0000 |
0.02532 |
40 |
40 |
0 |
0 |
994 |
I'm still working on his separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
995 |
I guess I shouldn't have stroked her back. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
996 |
This still beats the bedbugs I got from that online short-term vacation rental. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
997 |
Wife say, "Make good pet." I say, "Ow." |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
998 |
They took my passport away too. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
999 |
As long as I don't cross the county line he's quiet as a mouse. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1000 |
It's ok he's friendly. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1001 |
He hasn't evolved to sniffing yet. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1002 |
I would absolutely love to go out to dinner as we planned, but I've just invented the zero, discovered fire, and perfected the axle, and now THIS! |
1.0000 |
0.02667 |
38 |
38 |
0 |
0 |
1003 |
Thought it would be cute to teach it some idioms, but maybe I shouldn't have started with "break a leg". |
1.0000 |
0.02667 |
38 |
38 |
0 |
0 |
1004 |
I got house arrest with an ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.02667 |
38 |
38 |
0 |
0 |
1005 |
It's a little painful, but I'm teaching him to heel. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1006 |
He’s developed an attachment. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1007 |
Afraid I’m currently detained |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1008 |
The evolution of depth perception took a major step forward today. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1009 |
Yabba Dabba Don't! |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1010 |
If he let's go, I'll bleed to death, so I tied him to my leg. It's what I'm calling Existentialism. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1011 |
Good thing this happened while you are still on our insurance. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1012 |
Yes, sometimes there is a glitch in the robovac. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1013 |
We had the "It's not you - it's me" conversation. But he just won't let go. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1014 |
It's something new the judge is trying called "house arrest." |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1015 |
It's so I can't leave the cave. My probation officer insisted on it. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1016 |
It looks worse than it feels. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1017 |
He's a Minidoodle - Rex. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1018 |
I preferred elctronic monitoring, but the judge wouldn't go for it... |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1019 |
Its called a boot. I picked it up in Denver. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1020 |
Yeah, I tried to schedule an appointment with the doctor but it'll be another couple millennia before he exists. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1021 |
you guys gotta get me the fuck out of here |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1022 |
Steggie has a bad case of separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1023 |
He's grown attached to me. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1024 |
Apparently these are not herbivores. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1025 |
It's hard to find a baby sitter on such short notice |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1026 |
You wouldn't understand. It's a man cave thing. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1027 |
Them judge let me go home, but I have to wear this for 90 days. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1028 |
It's the last time I'll sass him with the expression, 'Bite me.' |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1029 |
My therapist says he has attachment issues. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1030 |
Live ankle bracelets are the thing now. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1031 |
He's a loyal pet, but the separation anxiety is painful. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1032 |
Our vet says it is separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1033 |
I think the home we entered have leg piece loving beings! |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1034 |
This new ankle monitors are a drag ... |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1035 |
This Ankylosaurus bracelet's clasp is a real pain. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1036 |
Thanks for coming over, I’m on cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1037 |
You should see the mailman. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1038 |
Yet, I feel supported and free from anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1039 |
It is a bit uncomfortable, but it looks great! |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1040 |
They'll take it off when I get out of cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1041 |
The pet shop said he mainly eats calves |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1042 |
I don't know what it is because we haven't invented dictionaries yet. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1043 |
I was busted with a third drinking-while-gathering and got slapped with this Jurassic monitoring device. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1044 |
The Neanderthals trained him to do this. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1045 |
He’s developed an unhealthy attachment. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1046 |
Does it look bad? |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1047 |
Everyone says it’ll be extinct in three years, so I ignore the pain. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1048 |
There's a WHAT? |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1049 |
Nobody knew that house arrest could be so complicated. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1050 |
We bounded at the pet store. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1051 |
technically I can leave the state, but who has the energy! |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1052 |
And then they towed away the car. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1053 |
I appreciate the invitation, but I’m still under house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1054 |
He's been a little clingy since his friends went extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1055 |
Please?! I promise I'll feed him. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1056 |
Don't worry, he goes extinct tomorrow. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1057 |
Prison's full, so they gave me one of these. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1058 |
Thankfully he's hypoallergenic. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1059 |
I'm under house arrest, can't leave the cave. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1060 |
Guilty but the judge cut me some slack. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1061 |
I'm under home confinement and still getting used to my ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1062 |
The best part is I don’t feel so alone anymore. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1063 |
Spot's bite is way worse than his bark. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1064 |
You're right. I should have read the lease's opt-out clause more carefully. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1065 |
He is so sticky, I would give a leg just to get rid of him |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1066 |
Yeah, house arrest blows. Oh, don't mind him; that's just my ankle monitor lizard. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1067 |
You can see my Fitbit is extremely possessive. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1068 |
The worst part is that it's not covered by Trumpcare. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1069 |
The vet told me she should grow out of this clingy stage when the mating season ends. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1070 |
I can't wait until that big asteroid hits. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1071 |
I am afraid that one day his separation anxiety will cost me a leg |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1072 |
He wants me to take him out for his daily drag |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1073 |
You're just in time for dinner! |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1074 |
Sorry I can't watch the meteor shower tonight. I'm on house arrest until further notice. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1075 |
I'I'm grounded until sundown. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1076 |
I chalk it up to separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1077 |
Emotion regulation skills are still a struggle. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1078 |
It's just a love bite." |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1079 |
New Year is off to a bad start. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1080 |
He has abandonment issues. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1081 |
I'm now his constant companion. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1082 |
I brought up politics and religion. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1083 |
Color balance is the key to happiness. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1084 |
It followed me home Ma , can we keep it ? |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1085 |
It will prove Darwin doesn't have a leg to stand on. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1086 |
There are advantages to Diabetic Neuropathy. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1087 |
Well you did say "go break a leg." |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1088 |
His new therapist says it's a reactive attachment disorder. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1089 |
I’ll be glad when I get off cave arrest. This ankle monitor is cramping my style. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1090 |
No, you can’t pet him. He bites. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1091 |
Not to worry. They say I will be off of house arrest soon. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1092 |
Stella was a carouser. So Iwent for clingy this time. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1093 |
I can't go out tonight. I'm on house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1094 |
Yes he's got very attached. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1095 |
Fortunately he's a herbivore-vegetarian. But I am starting to worry. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1096 |
yes, but at least she doesn't shed |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1097 |
Under cave arrest but wish it came with more fashionable accessories. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1098 |
How many of these new live-traps would you boys like to order? |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1099 |
He’s been like this ever since the volcano took his mother. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1100 |
This house arrest bracelet is archaic. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1101 |
Cave Badger don't care! |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1102 |
At least he doesn't shed. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1103 |
It's a mandatory requirement of home confinement sentencing. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1104 |
'She just can't let go and move on.' |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1105 |
I made bail but I am required to wear a GPS Ankle Bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1106 |
She's what you'd call high maintenance. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1107 |
Dont worry, he wouldn’t dare draw blood. He’s just a lobbyist. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1108 |
I was trying to teach him to "heel." |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1109 |
You know the type. He’s having a bad day, so now I’ve got to have a bad day. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1110 |
Would you two please sneer at him so he'll chase you and let go of my leg? |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1111 |
Therapy Pet 1.0 |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1112 |
It's called an ankle monitor, but I'm thinking jail might be better. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1113 |
You know how it goes....the stray animals chose their human. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1114 |
Sorry, I can't go to lunch, I'm still under house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1115 |
He doesn't eat much, I promise. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1116 |
separation anxiety. his therapist is pretty sure that he'll grow out of it |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1117 |
I don't know, he just called me terrific last night. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1118 |
Sure, there are a few drawbacks, but this new house arrest app is really fast. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1119 |
Could you tell me if this is your dinosaur, and could you tell me if law suits have been invented yet? |
1.0000 |
0.02667 |
38 |
38 |
0 |
0 |
1120 |
This Inter-Cave of Things needs a lot more work. |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1121 |
He wants to be domesticated. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1122 |
He's growing on me. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1123 |
Yeah, after the club incident I'm under cave arrest and forced to wear a trackasaurous. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1124 |
It's called house arrest, and it's very in. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1125 |
He's a wee bit attached. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1126 |
They were all out of chihuahuas. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1127 |
It's not your dinosaur? |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1128 |
Court ordered leg shackle |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1129 |
I'm still on parole. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1130 |
I’m a creationist |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1131 |
It's called home confinement prior to trial. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1132 |
Nothing worse than having a clingy dinosaur |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1133 |
The security system conveyed with the property. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1134 |
He keeps me civilized. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1135 |
Green sells. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1136 |
Have you tried reasoning with him? |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1137 |
Actually, it takes my mind off Trump! |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1138 |
Remember that stegosaurus we had for dinner last week? Bring me a couple of the bones. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1139 |
I was thinking of getting a saber tooth , but I'm allergic to cats. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1140 |
I think it’s time for Steve Bannon to go. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1141 |
I got him at the shelter |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1142 |
I think overprotective behavior is rather typical for the puppies. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1143 |
He has separation anxiety and the treatment is worse than the cure. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1144 |
He's really very lovable. He's just scratching a mosquito bite on my ankle! |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1145 |
Maybe marriage is between a man and a woman. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1146 |
Neither one of you gets me |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1147 |
He's so loving that until his recent training, we were attached at the hip. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1148 |
This separation anxiety thing is a bit of a bummer. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1149 |
The way I see it, my 2018 is all uphill from here. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1150 |
It’s a new alternative to incarceration. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1151 |
He is the best cave guard ever but he cost me an arm and a leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1152 |
It's part of my house arrest. If I leave, it automatically eats me. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1153 |
No worries Rodnick, Bobbi-Sue has already eaten, she's just giving you a "howdy" nibble. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1154 |
Usually, Fido is much more affectionate. You can take him with you when he lets go of my leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1155 |
This stays on until the trial. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1156 |
It is the first recorded case of separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1157 |
I wish I hadn’t started eat local. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1158 |
It time to take Thag for walk. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1159 |
He’s not perfect but he IS housebroken. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1160 |
"He does a good job of keeping the riff-raff out, but he is a little moody. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1161 |
He's a rescue with abandonment issues. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1162 |
This time he’s making sure I stay home |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1163 |
Haven't found its leash yet. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1164 |
It’s what Freud will call an attachment disorder. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1165 |
Don’t worry. He’s just flossing. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1166 |
As soon as the Joneses laid eyes on George’s pet dragon, they knew he wasn’t pulling their leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1167 |
Rescue animals really become attached to you. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1168 |
Do me a favor and tell Grok this is not the kind of ankle-biter I wanted from him. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1169 |
I realize now that separation anxiety wasn't so bad after all... |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1170 |
I’d say it’s like ‘A dog with a bone in its mouth,’ but contextually we’re not there yet. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1171 |
Seriously. Not having indoor plumbing sucks. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1172 |
The technology still has some kinks in it. This ankle monitor is barely cavebroken. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1173 |
Get this fucking thing off my goddamn leg good lord! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1174 |
My pet 'Tourniquet' hates to see me leave the cave. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1175 |
All he can do is fetch. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1176 |
We’re going to get married with or without your approval. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1177 |
Like the new apparel? ... It's genuine komodo dragon leather! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1178 |
Yeah, its court-ordered. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1179 |
Run! He has a sweet tooth and we're all one-eye candy. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1180 |
These crocs come only in this style. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1181 |
Only two more moons of house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1182 |
It wouldn’t be so bad if he hadn’t started with my left arm. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1183 |
The judge sentenced me to House Arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1184 |
I've invented scissors! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1185 |
Who knew? My ex kept warning me about being "mantagonistic" but my lawyer said restraining orders don't have any teeth. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1186 |
No enterprise can afford to lose an arm and a leg... |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1187 |
What could I do? He was the cutest one at the dragon shelter. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1188 |
I call him Fido |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1189 |
It's better than jail - but still cruel and unusual. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1190 |
Yeah, it's better than jail but this ankle monitor is a pain. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1191 |
This is our new dragon pup, Devon. He's still in training. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1192 |
Our new electronic tagging system has a few teething problems! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1193 |
She's grown increasingly attached to me. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1194 |
One foot in the door is a start. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1195 |
Quick! Fetch my pigments. I’m inspired! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1196 |
It was either this or jail until my trial date. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1197 |
But he is cave-broken. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1198 |
Ankle bracelets are really "in," but I'm not sure I want to keep mine... it really slows me down. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1199 |
Isn't it obvious, we're in love. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1200 |
He shows up every time I yell "Woooo Pig Sooie! Razorbacks!" |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1201 |
I call it a "pet." |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1202 |
But his parents already said he could keep me! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1203 |
But is she cave trained? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1204 |
Shes too clingy to allow a divorce, we need to go the extinction route! |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1205 |
I just wanted a friend and now we're attached. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1206 |
I'm glad I got a mini. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1207 |
I blame myself. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1208 |
#Indited schmindited! |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1209 |
She's been this way ever since the divorce. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1210 |
I need to teach it anger management. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1211 |
I thought I'd look more evolved with shaved legs. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1212 |
Yeah, sometimes life throws you a curve. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1213 |
Just Married |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1214 |
Pets nowadays cost an arm and a leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1215 |
I was put under house arrest for drawing on the walls. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1216 |
These ankle-biters really keep my feet warm. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1217 |
How much did we spend on obedience school? |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1218 |
Some day this will be known as the first parking boot |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1219 |
He says that conditions have deteriorated to the point where he feels totally marginalized and invalidated. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1220 |
Thanks for asking me over for dinner. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1221 |
I guess we’re gonna stay in the cave but you two have fun. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1222 |
It's my new invention called the vice. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1223 |
It’s a caustic relationship. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1224 |
No worry, he's just very possessive. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1225 |
Good news. We don't have to go out hunting for tonight's dinner. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1226 |
He doesn’t like to be left alone. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1227 |
Can we keep him? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1228 |
He usually likes to bite at least three people a day. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1229 |
I ordered a sandwich. |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1230 |
On the plus side, I'm going vegan. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1231 |
I'm still under house arrest. Due to budget cuts they hard to borrow the ankle monitor from Bedrock PD. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1232 |
He's really well-known, a leg end in his own time. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1233 |
I love it! Let's go get the alarm tag removed. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1234 |
Please tell me it's herbivorous. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1235 |
The poor dear has developed an extreme fear of abandonment. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1236 |
I swear I wasn’t trying to break in. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1237 |
House arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1238 |
I hear it will be a while before they evolve puppies. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1239 |
This is the first time I put my foot in a mouth other than my own! |
1.0000 |
0.02532 |
40 |
40 |
0 |
0 |
1240 |
"Get yourself one of these and say "Om" 20 minutes a day. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1241 |
It'a a green maraschino cherry and it's what I came up here to sit on. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1242 |
I watched it hatch, now this! |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1243 |
What was the name of that dinosaur whisperer again? |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1244 |
It's a love touch. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1245 |
He attacked me from my blind side. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1246 |
Somehow I pissed him off. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1247 |
He likes to keep a close eye on me. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1248 |
She's gotten smaller but more demanding since the last asteroid impact. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1249 |
Shake a leg! |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1250 |
On the upside, he keeps the pterodactyls from making off with the kids. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1251 |
Minor snag in the evolution of man's best friend. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1252 |
It's state-of-the-art in home security. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1253 |
We just rescued him. He has abandonment issues. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1254 |
It's called an "ankle bracelet"...I'm under house arrest for drawing animal pictures on Og's cave wall. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1255 |
I admit, we have a bit of a dino problem, but what cave doesn't? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1256 |
Onid has severe separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1257 |
This wasn't what I meant when I asked what's for dinner. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1258 |
Darwinian kickball... |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1259 |
Did I mention he's cavebroken? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1260 |
I know you said I should be pulling my own weight, but this doesn't seem right. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1261 |
Yes, it's a breakthrough hunting innovation. Now go gather firewood, quick. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1262 |
I am evolving too fast for him. He's angry. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1263 |
I don't care if it's an anachronism, it still hurts! |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1264 |
I got two weeks left of cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1265 |
I can't go. I'm a stay-at-home Mom. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1266 |
Which one of you nit-wits brought the torch? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1267 |
We bounded at the pet store. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1268 |
Have you met my pet, Darwin? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1269 |
I think it'll be four for dinner! |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1270 |
Yeah, house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1271 |
It uses my leg to clean its teeth. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1272 |
Cave Arrest |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1273 |
Extinct? Nope but he’s just pulling my leg! |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1274 |
Sorry guys I can't go out. I am under cave arrest. The cops put this lock on my ankle. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1275 |
Yeah it hurts but I won't cave in |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1276 |
You'll see; lizard leather shoes will become a thing. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1277 |
It's not so bad. His bark is worse. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1278 |
You guys go out hunting. This spottosaur has grown attached to me. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1279 |
Just wait till he finds out that leg is all bone and no meat. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1280 |
It’s called a razor! |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1281 |
The tribal elders have me on cave arrest after my last no collar crime. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1282 |
I call it the a-leg-eater |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1283 |
He is vegan so I’m not so worried... |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1284 |
He usually opens up by sunset. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1285 |
It's the latest in footwear. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1286 |
It's a parole bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1287 |
You guys have any floss? |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1288 |
I'm under house arrest for tagging caves in Lascaux. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1289 |
It's an affectionate bite. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1290 |
Steve... who’s your new friend? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1291 |
I got one month in-cave probation and this ankle monitor lizard. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1292 |
The ankle monitor isn't as bad as I thought it would be. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1293 |
No, you can't. Go down to the swamp and get your own. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1294 |
The worst part is I have to stay home with the kids. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1295 |
He’s teaching me to beg. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1296 |
I'm naming him "Crocs" |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1297 |
Can we keep him, Mom? Please? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1298 |
Help. Johnny bit me again. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1299 |
We adopted him from the premordial pond. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1300 |
His bark is worse than his bite. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1301 |
I'm under cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1302 |
Don't worry, he won't bite you. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1303 |
If we all had two eyes and better depth perception we’d see my predicament is just fake news. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1304 |
We just got her. She’s a mini ankylosaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1305 |
It’s in lieu of cash bail... |
1.0000 |
0.02667 |
38 |
38 |
0 |
0 |
1306 |
Hi Jenny, How is your little ankle biter? |
1.0000 |
0.02667 |
38 |
38 |
0 |
0 |
1307 |
I thought you said he was an herbivore? |
1.0000 |
0.02817 |
36 |
36 |
0 |
0 |
1308 |
early man under "house arrest" |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1309 |
The judge placed me on home confinement. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1310 |
I'm very attached to him, too. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1311 |
Finally! I heard the guy next door invented a 'leash' thingy. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1312 |
Sorry brahs, can’t go out tonight. I’m totes grounded. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1313 |
The box said nothing about this. I'm thinking class action! |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1314 |
Really? I feed him; give him love. Like any loyal pet, can't he wait till I'm dead before he tries to eat me? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1315 |
He followed me home, can I eat him? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1316 |
The ad said he was cave broken, but I'm beginning to have doubts. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1317 |
I fell asleep in a no-parking zone. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1318 |
My fault. I did bite him first. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1319 |
I'm under house pet arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1320 |
It was either this or remain in jail. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1321 |
It's an ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1322 |
No, our "dog" doesn't bite. Why do you ask? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1323 |
Sorry I can't I'am under house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1324 |
He's always been an ankle-biter. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1325 |
Dessert tonight is more of an aspiration than a course. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1326 |
I think I put my foot in his mouth. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1327 |
This has become a painful relationship. It is time for me to leave. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1328 |
Those are just his puppy teeth |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1329 |
I'm just happy he's not two feet taller! |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1330 |
Personally, I can't wait until dogs are domesticated. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1331 |
Yeah, it totally bites but it still beats juvie. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
1332 |
Really ? I thought it was a wart |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
1333 |
I'm waiting until he's extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1334 |
The judge says I have to stay within 3,000 ft. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1335 |
A sore butt will harm your decision making. Take it from me Son that's sage advice. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1336 |
Now that I caught him what do I do? |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1337 |
He’s still teething. But his mother’s skin made great sandals. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1338 |
He doesn't eat much! |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1339 |
Our new health routine. It strengthens my tibialis anterior and Dinah's mandible. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
1340 |
In retrospect, his Tinder bio did say he becomes "easily attached." |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1341 |
It's his protest against obedience school. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1342 |
He gets like this every time he sees a meteorite. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1343 |
He's really quite attached to me! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1344 |
The breeder didn't tell me he was an ankle biter. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1345 |
My ankle monitor comes off in 30 days. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1346 |
He's not into opera. He wants to netflix and chill jurassic park again. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1347 |
Oh, and pick up a new chew toy for Yogi. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1348 |
We met at a meat market. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1349 |
As it happens, I'm pretty familiar with the paleo diet. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1350 |
Fifi hasn't been herself since that silly asteroid hit Mexico. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1351 |
The judge says after 60 days I can remove it and leave my cave. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1352 |
So I hear this Farm to Table thing is all the rage... |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1353 |
The doctor says it's terminal but I refuse to let it define me. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1354 |
I'll join you after. I'm kind of in between things. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1355 |
It's the newest fashion trend. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1356 |
It's one of those boutique mini hybrids that is all the rage. It's called a legasaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1357 |
Before iPhones it was the family pet that was responsible for keeping track of teenagers. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1358 |
The doctor says it's going around, so take it easy and come in next week if I'm not feeling better. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1359 |
You said, “Get a pet.” |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1360 |
How cute! You got a puppy. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1361 |
My doctor says I got this rash by walking through the swamp......it's not contagious! |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1362 |
The housebreaking is a work in progress. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1363 |
A present from the old ball and chain. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1364 |
You do have to be patient with these rescue animals. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1365 |
Bedsaurs |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1366 |
I think it’s his way of telling me not to go out without him. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1367 |
Seems a bit late for a club, don’t you think? |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1368 |
It'll be good for dinner! |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1369 |
At first I thought our idea of a staycation this winter made a lot of sense. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1370 |
I wish I could go, but he chews my leg off if I leave the cave. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1371 |
Sometimes you eat the stegosaurus, and sometimes the stegosaurus eats you. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1372 |
It followed me home. Can I keep it? |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1373 |
Time to call the Stegosaurus Whisperer. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1374 |
"Open Sesame" did not work, should I try " Button" ? |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
1375 |
Grood got the cave in the divorce. I got the dog. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1376 |
It's just three months of house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1377 |
Yeah, but it sure beats the cost of chew toys... |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1378 |
Evolution called. They want this one back. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1379 |
The garbage disposal is on the fritz... |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1380 |
He’s had abandonment issues ever since the Cretaceous Period. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1381 |
The paleontologist says it's temporary. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1382 |
It helps my attachment disorder. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1383 |
Yes, I am on cave arrest. They ran out of ankle bracelets. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1384 |
Seemed easier than spearing him first before dragging him home. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1385 |
No really, it’s fine. This is just his way of showing affection. |
1.0000 |
0.02740 |
37 |
37 |
0 |
0 |
1386 |
I need to stay back -- she is having some separation anxiety issues right now. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1387 |
Yes, a second eye would be useful. |
1.0000 |
0.02740 |
37 |
37 |
0 |
0 |
1388 |
I may be in an unhealthy relationship. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1389 |
He thinks you're from the vet's office. I joked about getting him castrated. |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1390 |
He thinks I’m the mailman. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1391 |
Spot has a mild case of separation anxiety |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1392 |
He is so playful and cute. I just love him. His name is Phineas. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1393 |
...and once my cave arrest is completed, I'm considering keeping him as my emotional support animal. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1394 |
Guys, can I bring my Dino to the party tonight? She's not vicious at all! |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1395 |
These purebreds are a little high strung |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1396 |
SHE TELLS ME THERE WAS ABOUT A 1.5 M YEAR WAIT FOR A BIJON FRISE |
1.0000 |
0.02899 |
35 |
35 |
0 |
0 |
1397 |
That settles it guys. Meet your new drummer. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
1398 |
It's your turn to feed Rufus. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1399 |
I popped in looking for my son's pet pterodactyl that's been missing since yesterday morning. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1400 |
"I wish I could join you, but I'm still on house arrest." Shelley Rodgers Alexandria, VA |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1401 |
Never mind the beast. He's just playful. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1402 |
I just didn't want to be rude. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1403 |
I don't know for sure, but I think he likes me.... |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1404 |
Oh don't worry, he's an herbivore! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1405 |
He’s territorial and he’s possessive but he doesn’t make me turn the heat up. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1406 |
He'll jump up and try to lick you, but don't worry, he doesn't bite. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1407 |
He is not too bad for a cave pet. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1408 |
He's very needy but he knows a lot of tricks. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1409 |
Don’t worry folks. There’s a witch doctor around the corner. Really, really wonderful. Besides, this bight is “fake news.” |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1410 |
You are under house arrest! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1411 |
It’s so I can’t leave the cave until my trial. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1412 |
It's okay, he's just excited |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1413 |
The breeder mentioned that he might be suffering from a Separation Anxiety Complex. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1414 |
It's my new court-ordered Global Prehistoric System cave-arrest device! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1415 |
The ankle monitor comes off tomorrow, but I'll still be on cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1416 |
It's the owner, not the prehistoric classification. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1417 |
You get used to the leg biting....and honestly he's cleaner than my ex. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1418 |
It’s only because of obedience school that I even have a leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1419 |
Yeah, yeah, yeah...I know that's how he got his name! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1420 |
When we picked him up at the Paleozoic Society for the Prevention of Cruelty To Animals told me he left alone a lot as a hatchling. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1421 |
I'm afraid it's gonna take a million years to train this guy |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1422 |
Before incarnation he was a alpha male. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1423 |
Whatever happened to 'two eyes are better than one?' |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1424 |
She'll grow out of it. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1425 |
Is this a trap? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1426 |
Me and Allie didn't think you'd be home until sunset! |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1427 |
It was knapping on the rock pile or home detention. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1428 |
Dinner plans have changed. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1429 |
You’d think that the end of society would have come with the end of home arrest... |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1430 |
He's attracted to me and won't leave me alone. That's more than I can say for my caveman. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1431 |
When was the last day to apply for Marketplace health insurance again? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1432 |
OK, now you can come in, he won't bte. Ok, now you can come in, he won't bite. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1433 |
He doesn't believe me when I tell him cave drawings put 10 pounds on you. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1434 |
"Sometimes there is a fine line between being playful an being hurtful". |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1435 |
We have to make one stop. He really wants to go to dino daycare. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1436 |
It also game in green. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1437 |
He wants to go for a walk. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1438 |
Are you sure the low temps will kill bed bugs ? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1439 |
You could have saved yourself the trip and downloaded my app. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1440 |
No, sorry, I'm The Dalai Lime-a. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1441 |
I mentioned his mama was also horny. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1442 |
Just a pet. He's getting used to us. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1443 |
This species can't be domesticated. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1444 |
House arrest hasn't been the same since they ran out of the normal anklets. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1445 |
“The chief said I need to do this for 90 days”. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1446 |
Oh Please. I will walk him. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1447 |
Also, I wasn't allowed to celebrate New Year's Eve! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1448 |
It was court ordered. It let's me stay under cave arrest instead of going to jail. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1449 |
I got 90 days cave arrest. If I step outside he snaps it off. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1450 |
THIS IS THE WAY I'm KEPT A STAY AT HOME MOM |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1451 |
We're working on Fluffy's homo sapien aversion. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1452 |
Neadrathal DNA proves more complex than scientists thought. Due to the small pool of potential mates. An alligator was a disappointing but realistic date to have to meet the parents. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1453 |
Yeah, it's my monitor lizard. I can't go out, I'm under cave arrest, again. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1454 |
I was caught stealing fire and now I have to wear this court mandated ankle monitor |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1455 |
She’s not a bad Pitosaurus. She just has a bad owner. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1456 |
I can’t go with you, I’m under dragon arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1457 |
2500 years from now they'll call this Reactive Attachment Disorder. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1458 |
I'm waiting on these ankle biters to evolve. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1459 |
She is so affectionate. Don't you just lover her? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1460 |
They call this a smart collar. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1461 |
How much loner are you on house arrest? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1462 |
I've decided to call this strange creature an albatross. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1463 |
That new coconut oil is working out great otherwise. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1464 |
Is there an app for this? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1465 |
You just can't club a woman, drag her back your cave anymore. #TimesUp |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1466 |
Fish pedicures are less effective |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1467 |
I think I'm OK for now. Thanks though. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1468 |
He followed |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1469 |
Yes, I have just invented this trick called 'heeling'. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1470 |
I can’t wait for someone to invent electronic monitoring for home detention. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1471 |
We're still evolving as hunter-gatherers. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1472 |
The judge called it an "ankle monitor". He said that if I try to flee before my trial, they just follow the blood trail. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1473 |
Can't wait 'til he goes extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1474 |
My pet lizard and I are on our way to Obedience School. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1475 |
It was only simple petting. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1476 |
Do you think he's too attached to me? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1477 |
What? Haven't you seen "Dino Instinct" |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1478 |
He's part pitbull. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1479 |
I'm under cave-arrest and cannot leave without setting off the ankle alarm. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1480 |
When winter takes a grip its hard to shake off |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1481 |
It’s an ankle weight for strong calves |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1482 |
It's called a legosaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1483 |
I'm not comfortable here. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1484 |
I should never have let him start licking the plates. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1485 |
He just wants to be walked out. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1486 |
Mom and Dad, my student loans for my spear making degree are making it hard to move out. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1487 |
He's a rescue. He's got a little separation anxiety. I think I'll call him Dave. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1488 |
You just have to jiggle it... |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1489 |
Pal's loyal, but possessive. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1490 |
So, is this doing the Crocodile Rock? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1491 |
I guess I'm really more of a two-eyed pet person. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1492 |
He’s never gotten over the fear of flying. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1493 |
He needs Dino Daycare. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1494 |
I talked the salesman down to just a leg. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1495 |
Whatever you do, don't show fear. The Mutilatasaurus only attacks if it senses fear... |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1496 |
He's almost cave broken. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1497 |
Don't worry, he won't bite you. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1498 |
His advice is generally good, but not so much his delivery. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1499 |
You had better hope an asteroid strikes earth and he becomes extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1500 |
Don't worry, he only bites me for some reason...isn't that right Buddy? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1501 |
I told him his skin would make a nice purse. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1502 |
I've weaned him from eyeballs. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1503 |
Are you are enjoying your house arrest Mr. Manafort? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1504 |
I tried to cross the road. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1505 |
Ouch, have they invented orthopedic doctors yet?????? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1506 |
I consider him my close friend. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1507 |
So far, I'm thinking the wolf makes a better pack animal. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1508 |
Ease your mind, your ass will follow. There ya go. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1509 |
The concept behind this 'boot' has great potential to disrupt future civilizations and their drivers. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1510 |
Believe me, it's an upgrade from my ex-ball-and-chain. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1511 |
No concern, This animal is extinct |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1512 |
It's the latest thing! Ankle bracelets! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1513 |
I should have taken the Bible more literally. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1514 |
I can’t believe this is still happening in America. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1515 |
The judge said three more months of house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1516 |
Guess we missed the lesson on "Leave it"! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1517 |
I wish I had depth perception. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1518 |
Never insult a dinosaur's political opinion. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1519 |
Are you pulling my leg |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1520 |
He has to be fed several times a day. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1521 |
Buster has strong feelings of anxiety separation and won't leave my side ever since I rescued him from a pack of wolves outside of the compound. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1522 |
I did try obedience training. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1523 |
I was looking for something with a bit more heal but this is what they are wearing in Europe this season |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1524 |
Yes, he's housebroken. He"ll let you know when he needs to go out. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1525 |
HHHHHHHH |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1526 |
It’s really the only socially responsible way to travel. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1527 |
I'm just here to tell you that you've made it and to wish you a good trip back down. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1528 |
Thanks Doc! I'm feeling better already. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1529 |
It's too bad you couldn't visit when we had furniture. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1530 |
Eye can’t move |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1531 |
He's getting old and grumpy and still mad for dressing him up like Santa at Christmas... |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1532 |
He's my new pet and we're hitting it off just fine: In fact he can't get enough of me. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1533 |
I think he loves me. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1534 |
I thought you said that your stegosaurus doesn't bite! |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1535 |
Here's here for the General Tsao's Chicken we ordered 15 minutes ago... |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1536 |
Half Pitbull , Half dinosaur. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1537 |
It actually turned out okay. The shaman gave me three weeks cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1538 |
Better me than the new furniture. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1539 |
Him new pet, named Spike. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1540 |
Lately, I'm feeling somewhat restricted in my movements. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1541 |
Find my parole officer. Named Flintstone. Offer him two pounds for my release. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1542 |
Cave Training the House Pet 7017 BC |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1543 |
Well, pets like this are good for civilian defense. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1544 |
But you’re wrong, he isn’t slimey at all! |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1545 |
I'm as surprised as you are, he looked friendly. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1546 |
He just bit my leg, didn't he? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1547 |
Where is that jaw opener I gave you for Christmas? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1548 |
"Oh, is there a tyrannosaurus-ankle-biteus latched to my leg? That's what that excruciating pain is in my ankle. Thank you so much for telling me that. I had no idea". Pre-historic sarcasm... |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1549 |
A new breed... a cross with a beagle. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1550 |
Call me ahab |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1551 |
I am feeding him, so I can feed on him! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1552 |
I was setting a trap for Godzilla and this thing was hiding under the leaves !! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1553 |
Ever since my wife went missing, the kids have been scared of him. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1554 |
She did not like the missionary position |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1555 |
He's still a bit wild, but I can tame him. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1556 |
Not to worry.It's not painful. He's only xenophobic. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1557 |
Don't worry, he's house-trained. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1558 |
When I googled "animals with scales" the reply said they were vegetarians |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1559 |
You've heard of chokers? This is a biter. And yes, it's made with real reptile! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1560 |
I promise, he’s house broken. We are just working on attachment issues. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1561 |
I think we burgled the wrong cave. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1562 |
I can't decide between tibiasuarus and fibulasaurus. He seems to like both. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1563 |
It said it was a "man cave." So I shouldn't be surprised this dinosaur tried to have his way with me. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1564 |
Alas, we may not be attached at the hip like you two, but as long as I don’t move a muscle, I say we make a fine pair. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1565 |
I’m what the reptiles call..consumptuous. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1566 |
He's just going through a teething phase. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1567 |
Relationships are all about connection. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1568 |
"House arrest" sounds like a vacation until it happens to you. Oh, and we live in caves. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1569 |
I think he'd make a great suitcase. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1570 |
Yeah, it hurts, but we sure don't get many door-to-door siding salesmen anymore. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1571 |
I call it ‘vaccination.’ Theoretically, I’m immune to dinosaurs. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1572 |
Oh, he's at that age where he doesn't want me to leave the cave. The pet therapist calls it separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1573 |
As you can see, I'm not a stegosaurus person. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1574 |
I thought if I had this alligator on my ankle I would be the subject of a cartoon caption contest in a couple thousand years. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1575 |
He’s a rescue velociraptor. Still a bit insecure. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1576 |
The often unobserved problem with an ankle-biter is that if you lie down he has access to your neck. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1577 |
Don't worry, it's my new Air Canada carry on luggage. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1578 |
The tribal leader ordered it so I won't leave the cave. If I do he eats me. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1579 |
You only have one eye so what’s one leg? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1580 |
Trade Ya My res and balloon for Your parachute |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1581 |
No I didn't steal your damn paintings. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1582 |
Sorry, I'm homestuck... |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1583 |
verdict: have to wear an ankle bracelet for 3 months |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1584 |
How do you like my new ankle monitor? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1585 |
I'm under CAVE Arrest with a tracing device that really means business. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1586 |
Until someone invites a leash, this is how we go for a walk. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1587 |
Well, I was into older chicks, and she didn't want to die a virgin... |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1588 |
It was either this or an ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1589 |
I traded in the old "ball and chain" for this? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1590 |
All the caves in this neighborhood have one, it's part of the charm! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1591 |
He's a pet. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1592 |
Does he bite? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1593 |
We’re aril working on ‘heel’. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1594 |
He's a cute pet, but sometimes he gets too frisky. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1595 |
There’s been an innovation in cave security I need to look into: it’s called the door. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1596 |
Eventually, she'll evolve to be my wife. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1597 |
He has become attach to me. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1598 |
My ankle is extremely Dino-sore. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1599 |
Would you like to hear my core beliefs? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1600 |
Welcome to the Afghanistan fitness club |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1601 |
I love him , but he's clingy . |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1602 |
It's always good manners to wipe your feet before entering. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1603 |
Home arrest isn't all that I thought it would be... |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1604 |
He must smell another amphibian on me. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1605 |
This ankle monitor bites. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1606 |
Just a neurosis I can't seem to shake. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1607 |
I can certainly give you some advice on your mucous problem. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1608 |
The top of the corporate ladder looks a lot like the bottom of it. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1609 |
It's called a prehistoric tether. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
1610 |
I told you not to bring your friends home! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1611 |
Call the dinosaur whisperer. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1612 |
It's a small price to pay for constant companionship. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1613 |
I told you it wasn't just us. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1614 |
It's just learning to heal. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1615 |
The judge was actually lenient. I need to wear it for only three months. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1616 |
What can I say, he's very attached to me. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1617 |
He holding on for dear life. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1618 |
I'm thinking of a change. Do you have any more of those dogs you raise as house pets? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1619 |
I can never remember, is it femur or fibula? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1620 |
It's not the saw I had in mind. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1621 |
Well, he's basically a good boy, but the separation anxiety is a work in progress. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1622 |
I'm under house arrest indefinitely. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1623 |
Of course this home is pest free, why do you ask? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1624 |
Too much of the big ball, not enough of the little ball. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
1625 |
Prehistoric house arrest ankle monitoring system. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1626 |
I have no idea...Totally bits me... |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1627 |
For reasons I don’t need to explain, I’m selling this cave. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1628 |
The courts have found him to be far more effective than a tether. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1629 |
I'm returning him to the dinosaur rescue people--I can't get him to behave. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1630 |
What do you mean, you can't dial 911? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1631 |
Better than the electric eals |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1632 |
"I think it's called comb envy. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1633 |
He hates when I mention fossil fuel. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1634 |
We better get a grip on the situation. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1635 |
He is so fond of me! He can not stay away even for a minute ... |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1636 |
I thought he was house trained. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1637 |
If I break parole he breaks my leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1638 |
I thought you said your dog didn't bite. . . . |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1639 |
Are you backbiting me? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1640 |
The ankle bracelet is to put some teeth into the pre-trial orders. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1641 |
My wife insisted we get a rescue... |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1642 |
He wasn't happy with my cave painting depiction. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1643 |
You go ahead; I'm going to get a bite first. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1644 |
Outrageous!! Dinosaurs never lived alongside humans. You must be ignoring the facts that go against your beliefs. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1645 |
It’s OK, I’ve got caveman’s comp. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1646 |
I still like my ankle biter better than yours. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1647 |
Oh, he does that |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1648 |
Your son? No. I haven't seen him. Have you checked the bowling alley? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1649 |
My leg stuck somewhere! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1650 |
Ankle bracelets are so passé. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1651 |
I just have to wait until it turns purple, becomes nostalgic, and lets go. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1652 |
I have ESA papers! He flies free,but its hard to get a doctor to state the passenger needs the emotional support of a toddler as an accommodation for air travel! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1653 |
We had a fight. He insists he is an ancestor! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1654 |
Emergency room visits are a $350 co-pay. I'm sure it will correct itself over time. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1655 |
Awww. Why can't I keep him? He won't eat much. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1656 |
Her mother told her that I'm her fiancé. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1657 |
IT'S JUST HIS WAY OF SHOWING ME AFFECTION!! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1658 |
I'm klingon-sitting for the neighbors. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1659 |
I just started him on dino-Prozac for the separation anxiety... |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1660 |
Impoundment regulations are getting swampier by the day. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1661 |
We're getting married. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1662 |
Men with beards |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1663 |
Sorry ladies, I couldn't get rid of the ball and chain. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1664 |
i just cannot get over Delta's new charges for first checked bag |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1665 |
I’m losing blood, but he has to eat at some point so I figured I’d just wait it out. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1666 |
In a couple thousand years they'll be man's best friend. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1667 |
Now that the judge imposed this ankle bracelet in lieu of cave confinement, I can get out of your way. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
1668 |
Ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1669 |
Until we invent the wheel this is all he knows how to do. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1670 |
You should say ow, Cyclops! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1671 |
It's just unrequited beastial love....no worries! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1672 |
I still have a leg up on the competition. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1673 |
Klonka said, "No pet, no sex." |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1674 |
Just separation anxiety -- they'd better hurry and invent Prozac. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1675 |
You know, you just gotta not let the anklebiters get to ya. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1676 |
Ow! Do you think there's an alternative universe where evolution's created a different 'man's best friend?' Ow! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1677 |
Yah, but ankle bracelets are SO "in" these days! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1678 |
I haven’t named him yet. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1679 |
He prefers it to a dog bone. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1680 |
Well Hera, it's sort of like being married! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1681 |
He won't let me go for walkies until he gets his bowl back. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1682 |
I get it now-- building a better roog trap means trap the roog, not the other way around. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1683 |
It seems a little excessive, but 7 months I can deal with ... |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1684 |
Sometimes pets can get too attached. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1685 |
I`m on home detention. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1686 |
They call it "house arrest." |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1687 |
My little Christmas toy joy. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1688 |
The Bronto Whisperer: I said 'heel.' Obviously we have a lot more work to do. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1689 |
Actually, the correct name is “scutellosaurus” |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1690 |
After he finishes breakfast, we'll be ready to go |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1691 |
He's hungry so it must be dinnertime. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1692 |
It's a trap! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1693 |
He came with a 30-day free trial. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1694 |
When is the nearest hospital? |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1695 |
This is how evolution works. I learn the hard way, but before I meet a gory end, we discuss what I could have done differently to ensure my survival. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1696 |
I have to wear this thing for a week because I started a fight with Grogg. If I go outside a 30 foot radius, he bites harder. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1697 |
It's called House Arrest, a new option that allows the Cave Man to protect my family against Brainwashing by those Matriarchal Evangelists. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1698 |
It's the pits. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1699 |
The original tether was born during the caveman era. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1700 |
No big deal: it's just his social consciousness venting. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1701 |
This is the latest type of ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1702 |
The real story of how a stagasaurus painted Lascaux. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1703 |
WHAT BITE |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1704 |
Yeah I have to wear him around my ankle in till I go before the tribal judges |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1705 |
A wee nip on the ankle. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1706 |
What, he's still under training. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1707 |
They gave me the tamper proof model this time. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1708 |
We're quite attached. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1709 |
I think it"s an Ankylosaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1710 |
Sorry fellas, can’t leave the cave tonight. The wife is being a bit clingy. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1711 |
So I told the judge I’d take cave arrest with an ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1712 |
Remember, you must always keep your eye on him, or else. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1713 |
I was just about to feed Spike. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1714 |
So, we meet in the trap. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1715 |
He's a high-strung breed |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1716 |
It's an ankle monitor. I'm under prehistoric house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1717 |
Well, it is progress; I believe we've gotten him over the hump. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1718 |
I parked my butt on the wrong rock so I have a boot until I pay my fine. They call it a “parking boot”. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1719 |
I was told it was 'family friendly' by the pet store owner. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1720 |
Hey guys, my advice is just live for today... I strongly suspect evolution is about to vote our one-eyed design off the island.. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1721 |
I worked from home today. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1722 |
It was buy one, get one half-off. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1723 |
He is with Homeland Security and wants to see my Voter ID. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1724 |
He doesn’t understand the word “fetch”. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1725 |
I told him we were setting him free. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1726 |
THE JUDGE SAID TWELVE TO EIGHTEEN MONTHS !! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1727 |
This never happened before Jurassic Park. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1728 |
Find My Friends App before it existed |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1729 |
Yeah, house arrest isn't that bad. They even give you a choice of ankle bracelets. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1730 |
Can you believe I have to wear an ankle monitor lizard until the next court date? |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1731 |
Puppies!!!! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1732 |
It's better than jail time. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1733 |
Yeah it’s kind of a pain, but I’m under “cave arrest” for 6 months. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1734 |
His training is on schedule, he will be ready to go home in a week! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1735 |
Have you ever wondered, why I’m here? |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1736 |
I find it helps to put on a dress and sandals and have a ball. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1737 |
I think something just bit me. Do you see anything? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1738 |
I know she is cute, but she needs training. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1739 |
I'm going to call it a leash. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1740 |
I’m trying to break him of his attachment phobia. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1741 |
What a day; first a crab attaches itself to my leg--now this! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1742 |
He's not quite domesticated. Other than that, he's really very gentle. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1743 |
I didn't see your sign "Beware of Dogasarus" |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1744 |
I'm trying to evolve. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1745 |
My wife thought we should start breeding for domestic traits. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1746 |
I know, I know they kept telling me this is a sellers market...but my wife asking me to deal with a demogorgon wrapped around my ankle so we can have a vaulted cave is a bit much. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1747 |
He came with the cave, he’s actually quite friendly. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1748 |
Next season, I'm sticking with earrings. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1749 |
He only does this when he's teething. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1750 |
If this is your playful puppy, I don't want to see his daddy! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1751 |
I sent for Cesar, but he's working with a brontosaur. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1752 |
She wants to turn everything blue. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1753 |
But I don't want to go for a walk. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1754 |
He doesn’t want me to go. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1755 |
It's an ankle bracelet--I'm under "cave arrest." |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1756 |
Seems like he's been teething since the turn of the first century. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1757 |
Mom, dad, please! It's the supermen! Just let me howl and plunder for ONE HOUR, and I promise I'll come straight home. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1758 |
He’s a great watching the cave while we’re out, but he does have some attachment issues. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1759 |
Your journey was difficult, yes. But the deal was Enlightenment for a RED yoga ball. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1760 |
His bite is worse than his growl. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1761 |
He's not cave trained yet. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1762 |
I let him do it because he's going to be extinct soon. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1763 |
If I try to leave, my ankle monitor activates. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1764 |
yabba dabba doo. we're the real modern Stone Age Family. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1765 |
I told you we needed more mosquito repellant. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1766 |
Where are your ankle biters? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1767 |
I guess you could say I'm having a bit of a Mesozoic Era aka "Middle-Life" Crisis. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1768 |
I guess I'd better expand the 'Don't bite the hand that feeds you' concept. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1769 |
In a few years, "Snapchat" will make sense. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1770 |
Just because I de-friended him online! |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1771 |
It’s my new Stegasoreus. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1772 |
He overheard our discussion about replacing him with a vacuum cleaner. |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1773 |
Does he think this is going to give him a leg up! |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1774 |
Apparently they mate for life fe |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1775 |
He's very insecure! |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1776 |
apparently I owe more than |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1777 |
Oh good! You're here! It's time for dinner. |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1778 |
You like? It beats the tacky ankle bracelet my husband gave me for my birthday. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1779 |
Welcome to Jurassic B&B. Your bed's the floor and Nibbles, here, will be your breakfast. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1780 |
At least under house arrest you can finally get around to painting the walls. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1781 |
He's on the second hand paleo diet |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1782 |
"I've been placed under 'Cave Arrest'". |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1783 |
Ma, Dad It's just a fad. I will be home by 11:00 "promise". |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1784 |
It could be huge in criminal justice, only what to call it? “Anklet” hardly captures the vibe. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1785 |
He's still just a puppy. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1786 |
My wife insists that I wear this tracking device if I want to go down to the local dinosaur pub. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1787 |
Lacoste? |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1788 |
I must taste like chicken. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1789 |
It's my fault for having such sculpted calves. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1790 |
If I can catch another one, I'm going to market them as bunny slippers |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1791 |
He thinks I'll attract more after I'm dead. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1792 |
Can we all agree the eye never lies. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1793 |
No kidding, this is how they play. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1794 |
Nope! Ankle-biting solicitors still not welcome! |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1795 |
You've heard of animal husbandry? |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1796 |
It was either wear this for a month or go to jail. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1797 |
Yeah, don’t know what I’m going to do with him. Last week he took my left arm. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1798 |
I got a new pet. It's a little Jealousarus. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1799 |
But you promised I could get a pet. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1800 |
We need to evolve our depth perception. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1801 |
This cave has a two hour limit and I already have 17 unpaid violations |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1802 |
It's cool; all the kids are doing it to prove their individualism. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1803 |
I didn't have time to go grocery shopping. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1804 |
...and it’s no longer occupied! |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1805 |
It's only a nip -- he's just a puppy! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1806 |
If it didn't hurt so much, I wouldn't think this was a real The New Yorker cartoon, either. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1807 |
OK. Either you're idiot paleantologists for saying dinosaurs are distinct, or you're genius studio executives for inventing TRULY 3-D cave drawings. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1808 |
Just you wait. Someday, someone will find us and name him after me. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1809 |
He didn’t look like this when I married him!j |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1810 |
relax, bill. It's only a shadow. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1811 |
He was a really cute baby though. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1812 |
The Palestinians manage the inside but the Israelis control who gets in; therefore the Jews pray at the wall but we control which Muslims get inside. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1813 |
He got too big for the cage. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1814 |
He won't let me go to BINGO today. He's afraid of his shadow. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1815 |
Frank assured me that he's really cuddly. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1816 |
The true story behind dinosaurs extinction! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1817 |
My leg is in its jaws and I can't walk. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1818 |
Oh, he's still a teething pupper. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1819 |
I promise I'll |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1820 |
He's housebroken. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1821 |
Then he said,'That's not my Stegosaurus.' |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1822 |
I don’t know why, but it has developed this great attachment to me! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1823 |
He is not house broken yet. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1824 |
They call it a "pet" and they say it's supposed to provide me with companionship. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1825 |
Mom, dad, please! It's the supermen! Just let me howl and plunder for ONE HOUR, and I promise I'll come straight home. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1826 |
He's a rescue from extinction with survivor's guilt. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1827 |
I'm on cave arrest and have to wear this ankle monitor." |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1828 |
I hope to return for next season. I was voted off. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1829 |
The standing desk wouldn’t fit in my cave. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1830 |
He’s endangered. Can I keep him? He will make a good lunch. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1831 |
OK maybe not now, but eventually we’ll make shoes out of them..! |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1832 |
Now you know who mangled my right arm! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1833 |
He said he prefers the old-fashioned way of biting back. |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1834 |
Really |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1835 |
this totally bites. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1836 |
I am going to contest this house arrest, but at least I got to come home awaiting trial. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1837 |
you want to move to Florida!? But I've never been south of Houston!!! |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1838 |
I think I got a dead leg, but it feels different this time |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1839 |
Crocodile anklets are, like, so last eon. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1840 |
This T*!*? Devil won't let go! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1841 |
I was thinking 'Jaws of Life' but that hasn't been invented yet. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1842 |
You paint, now. Cave art or not happen. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1843 |
I got it at one of those prehistoric reptile mills. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1844 |
He's on a diet |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1845 |
Yeah. I took the milk. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1846 |
I woke up this morning with this weird thing on my ankle, I'm seeing the doctor this afternoon. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1847 |
I’m kind of a little guy, but no one believes me. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1848 |
Think of it as dental floss being stuck in your teeth. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1849 |
I didn't know I had to walk my house arrest anklet. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1850 |
Dam camouflage, he suck up on me. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1851 |
Another cave caption who'd have thunk it ? |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1852 |
That’s absurd; you’re pulling my leg! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1853 |
We are progressive. But, dating dinosaurs is still frowned upon by other patrons... |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1854 |
It's my prototype for the wooley mammoth trap |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1855 |
He mistook me for an early hominin... |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1856 |
Me going to invent 'Yes Men' |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1857 |
If you let me keep him, I promise to keep him. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1858 |
You have to try cave physical therapy. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1859 |
Fancy a bite? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1860 |
I was looking for Margaret! |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1861 |
Opps ... I told him to shut up!! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1862 |
I have to stay here, he has Extinction Anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1863 |
The pet shop told me she was an herbivore, but she has proven otherwise. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1864 |
He is not yet cave trained |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1865 |
I've been bit by the acting bug. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1866 |
She got mad when I called her Asteroid. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1867 |
Surly he's covered in your cave owners policy. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1868 |
I mean, I used the funds I embezzled to buy this cave, and all I ended up getting was cave arrest, so it's a win win as far as I'm concerned |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1869 |
I warned him, 'Let go or be dragged!' |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1870 |
The shelter got hit by one of those flaming boulders last week, he’s got nowhere to stay |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1871 |
They really do take humanlike shits. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1872 |
You had the Supreme with extra fins and no anchovies. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1873 |
Fido has separation anxiety too, but she just pees on the fire and scratches the walls of our cave. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1874 |
His Jurassic bark is much worse than his bite. |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1875 |
He got my Achille's heel. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1876 |
I know that buying a watch Dino was a good investment. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1877 |
My cave mate does not me to leave. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1878 |
I know, man, but I got it on sale for a buck ninety-nine. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1879 |
I was going to Hawaii but... |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1880 |
Yes, but his online videos are adorable. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1881 |
I set it out to catch game. I came home one night, and of course, I forgot where I put it. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1882 |
Quit working on the wheel and invent some antibiotics, dammit! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1883 |
Don't worry.--He doesn't come with the property. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1884 |
No Madge, I wasn’t speaking metaphorically. Steve is my actual ball and change. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1885 |
It was free with my online subscription. Still trying to get used to sleeping with it on and getting all my steps in. Let's go. |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1886 |
He thinks I told him to sell all of his stocks 3 years ago. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1887 |
My pet aardvark is pulling my leg. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1888 |
Sure, but we'll have to get a sitter for this little ankle biter. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1889 |
It's the annoying ankle monitor I have to wear while I'm on cave arrest. What a drag, am I right? |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1890 |
It’s a dinosaur thing . . . ‘Jaws of Life’ in reverse. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1891 |
I'm a little bogged down right now. You guys go on without me. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1892 |
Maybe it's for the best that we were never able to have anklebiters of our own. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1893 |
Maybe we should try domesticating a cat? |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1894 |
I don’t know, Zina. I mean, I can see why you’re saying it looks like the zog has become attached to me, but my perspective remains as unclear as yours. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
1895 |
It's just one of the terms of my probation. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1896 |
Og invent ankle bracelet |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1897 |
It's a protoype for a new slipper |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1898 |
Hey doc, my leg hurts. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1899 |
Caveman rhyming slang: dumb albino—dino. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1900 |
"He's overly protective, but housebroken". |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1901 |
...and I can't eat rotten fruit while I'm on a boulder. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1902 |
How do you say 'ouch' in these pre-linguistic times? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1903 |
Bonkie bit Garp. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1904 |
Not sure about this whole "civilization" thing...First the wheel, now laws....I gotta wear this thing for 6 months for crashing my cart on New Year's Eve. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1905 |
He holding on for dear life. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1906 |
I can only take one of you, I have enough trouble already. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1907 |
"Eau de Prime Rib"...it's French. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1908 |
Keeping your pet in tow, before they invented the leash. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1909 |
It's a ransom for BITcoin. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1910 |
Down,boy! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1911 |
I don’t know guys, I just have this gnawing feeling! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1912 |
I sold the movie rights to Steven Spielberg! |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1913 |
Honest! All I said was ‘Let’s shake a leg’—I TOLD you not to get me a pre-owned Dino-vice! |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1914 |
IT'S JUST HIS WAY OF SHOWING ME AFFECTION!! |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1915 |
I told him he was underage, but he wouldn’t take no for an answer. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1916 |
Did you bring the bacon? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1917 |
It's sad. He has only me to teethe on. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1918 |
jerry for fuck s sake i told you we're not keeping that animal in the fucking house |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1919 |
Kitty hungry! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1920 |
It's the prehistoric mantrap. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1921 |
he's already getting help. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1922 |
Cave canem. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1923 |
"Couldn't you just chew his head off? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1924 |
Yes, Enlightened Core Power, starts at 530 |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1925 |
They call it cave incarceration. He is chomped on my ankle for the next thirty days so I can't leave this cave. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1926 |
It's what he thinks about our shirt contract. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1927 |
I had to bring him home he wouldn’t leave me alone. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1928 |
Fake news! |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1929 |
It's my new ankle monitor |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1930 |
He’s got me by the short hairs! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1931 |
Yes Virginia... it is an angel, but it doesn't have wings. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1932 |
My new anklet charm goes everywhere with me! |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1933 |
Could you pick up some Prozac for his separation anxiety? |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1934 |
He finds my artwork unflattering. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1935 |
Great to see you. I’ve been stuck in the cave all day and I’m bored |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1936 |
He's really friendly. |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1937 |
We're taking her car, and, yes, I will be home before 10. You didn't ask these questions when I was dating Cindy. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1938 |
My advice? Start a fad using a dead animal. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
1939 |
Wikipedia said he would be vegan!" "When I fell asleep he was swatting flies. |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
1940 |
Well everyone must bite the Panoplosaurus Brevis, or be bitten instead. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1941 |
An experiment in elementary courtesy gone bad. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1942 |
He wants seconds and thirds! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1943 |
It’s all the rage. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1944 |
Eat the intruders! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1945 |
He hates this weather. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1946 |
House arrest. Mueller. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1947 |
So--Your theory about the existence of the dinosaur may actually have some bite! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1948 |
I'm hoping we have something better to offer for dinner than me. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1949 |
Don't worry--Jessica's bite is worse than her bark! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1950 |
I got it for a dry skin commercial. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1951 |
it's court ordered |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1952 |
he wants me to date you |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1953 |
I'd remove it, but I hate the sight of blood. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1954 |
He likes me, I must taste like chicken. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1955 |
He's mad because I put him on a diet. No more wooly mammoths for him! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1956 |
Yes, I know you believe that in a matter of another few decades he and his kind will be wiped-out forever, but right now Jundji, your Mensa club's predictions are not helping me. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1957 |
They told me that a stegosaurus would the perfect pet because they're herbivores! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1958 |
I wish someone would invent pants! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1959 |
Was wondering if either of you have a crowbar I could use? This stray wondered in and attached himself to my lower leg. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1960 |
Don't worry, he only bites a little. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1961 |
Of all things, he's displeased with our discovery of the wheel. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1962 |
Sorry I don't fit your stereotype. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1963 |
Yes, the flat comes furnished … and I’ll throw in a portable inflator. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1964 |
no. Wrong Cave! I am not the wise old man sitting on a red ball |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
1965 |
We've ended the war on beautiful, green coal. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1966 |
To get ahead, you need the rub of the green. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
1967 |
I’ll show you how to become a high roller. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
1968 |
Sure, it's better than jail. I just wish the ankylosaurus bracelet wasn't so obvious. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1969 |
She was a shelter rescue from down south, and she still has a few attachment issues. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1970 |
Shanice got some kind of little thing around her finger when she got engaged. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1971 |
Love is not a many splendored thing. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
1972 |
My wife says it'll make for a great cave painting one day. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1973 |
I asked for a new boot for Xmas |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1974 |
Scratch between the fourth and fifth fin, should do it. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1975 |
Okay, almost domesticated. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1976 |
I told him we were still vegans, but he didn't believe me. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1977 |
Please let me keep it...he's just (argh) playing... |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1978 |
It’s the new leg-bait animal trap. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1979 |
No problem, they’re extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
1980 |
You could try too, he's fond of legs. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
1981 |
Ooh bark og oo-oo agh bite. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1982 |
I taste like a chicken finger. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1983 |
It's not a recognized breed, but it's still an ankle-biter! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
1984 |
# cartoon with suitcases Caption "Keep Calm and Carry On!" |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1985 |
Does this dress make my hips look big? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1986 |
good news, dinosaurs not dead |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1987 |
I think i just discovered the leg-oh-sore |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1988 |
We’ve become so attached since he followed me home the other day. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1989 |
but please, we are already attached! |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1990 |
No, I'm not in danger. It's an extreme form of separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1991 |
We like him, ever since he are the neighbor’s pitbull. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1992 |
Just one small step for man is--is-- |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1993 |
A T. rex ate our mailman, so.... |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1994 |
Of course we are just standing here- cameras haven’t been invented yet. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1995 |
Allow arf, arf rather than your friendly frog croak. It would make a more threatening sounding watch-amphibian. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1996 |
"He says, 'encroachment is in the mind of the beholden'... |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1997 |
Say what ya' want, I never see you bring anything for Thanksgiving |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1998 |
I’m not sure these ankle bracelets will catch on. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
1999 |
It's SO good to get away from them. They've been following me everywhere! |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2000 |
This guy is the best seller these days. I know, security used to be easier. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2001 |
I don’t know about you guys, but I plan to get legless. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2002 |
House arrest for dealing wheel. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2003 |
The truth you seek is in your core. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2004 |
They told me not to worry; a new one would just grow. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2005 |
The doctor says that unfortunately it's terminal. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2006 |
I just wanted to prove it was locally sourced. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2007 |
He's called a cave arrest bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2008 |
Some beach Somewhere |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2009 |
The judicial system was just invented yesterday, and I've already got an ankle brace. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2010 |
There once was a hermit named Saul. Who joked about his extra large ball. But in this day and age, even for a sage. That wouldn't be appropriate at all. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2011 |
Finders-Keepers !! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2012 |
They can be a bit aggressive, but I refuse to go back to pasteurized milk. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2013 |
Thanks for the heads-up, guys. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2014 |
No, he usually doesn't bite. Why do you ask? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2015 |
Don't worry. He's hypoallergenic. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2016 |
Thanks, but I've a gnawing feeling I'll be a home-body. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2017 |
My town hall is next week. This is my fundraiser. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2018 |
Yeah, it's community service and house arrest until I test negative for carbs. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2019 |
And this is my little ankle biter. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2020 |
What do you mean, Shake a leg? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2021 |
'She says she'll convert' |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2022 |
He never breaks the skin. In the future his bloodline will be known by the symbols A C D |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2023 |
Whatcha staring at? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2024 |
What do you think of my new ankle bracelet? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2025 |
Aside from the biting, they make good pets. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2026 |
My last roommate chased it around like it was toy ball. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2027 |
However, I do know the secret to everlasting peas. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2028 |
The judge told me I could live in the Big House if I didn’t like wearing him while I’m under house arrest. I just wish he didn’t clash with my décor. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2029 |
My wife won't be joining us. She's indisposed. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2030 |
He won best in show, but he's so young he hasn't yet learned Sit! Attack! |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2031 |
Hunting and gathering in one simple step. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2032 |
I got the idea from the gas station bathroom key. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2033 |
It was a one eyed one horned flying purple people eater. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2034 |
He's figured out how to spell T-Rex. |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
2035 |
I call him Albatross |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
2036 |
It's very att-AH-ched to me! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2037 |
I hear these things taste like a t-tex, but more tender. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2038 |
You should have seen him before I domesticated him. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2039 |
Fellow Thespians..This is how " Break -A- Leg " evolved. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2040 |
What's the matter? Legosarous got your leg? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2041 |
Good lawyer talk judge down to 6 moon cave arrest for insider gathering. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2042 |
Someday, this'll be the invention of Naugahyde. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2043 |
It's an anklebiterasaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2044 |
I thought Brother Joshua said all living things died in the apocalypse. Maybe we actually can walk out of this cave? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2045 |
I'm hoping for a quick case of foot and mouth disease. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2046 |
Yes but when it comes house arrest this one I can get off. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2047 |
He doesnt like it when I leave the cave without him. He doesn’t like it when I try to leave the cave without him. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2048 |
I think he found his supper! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2049 |
He told me to feed it while he was out hunter-gathering. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2050 |
her lawyer got a restraining order. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2051 |
He apparently has a foot fetish. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2052 |
Ow that hurts |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2053 |
He's a cave pet. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2054 |
He's checking if the shoes are geuine Tyrannosaurs or a knockoff |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2055 |
Hey, can I bum a cigarette? |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2056 |
gooble-de-gook gooble-de-gook ~ he's got teething |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2057 |
He needs a home. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2058 |
Have either of you heard about this new thing called a leash? |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2059 |
Last of the dinosaurs. Ain’t he cute. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2060 |
We've become very attracted. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2061 |
I think you should leave now. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2062 |
He answers to Donald Trump. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2063 |
Don't pet him. |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
2064 |
It lacks a human element. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2065 |
He was supposed to be sitting for his portrait. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2066 |
The judge just ordered me under house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2067 |
She doesn't have teeth. She's licking the salt off my gams. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2068 |
A wild, carnivorous beast on the loose -- those are just alLEGations |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2069 |
I've been pondering the expression"I'm rolling in green"(for the January 1 cartoon) |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2070 |
'' He's after mY iguanodon spare rib recipe." |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2071 |
Judge made it a condition of my bail. Fortunately, skinny jeans are no longer in fashion or I don't know what I'd do. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2072 |
He isn't worth a shit as a guard dog, but he can fetch the fuck out of slippers. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2073 |
It’s an innovative new form of rehabilitative justice called “house arrest”. Just think how persuasive it will be in deterring corruption in the centuries to come. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2074 |
I thought we were auditioning for the 'Allegory of the Cave'? |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2075 |
What are you talking about? Anklets are totally back in style. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2076 |
Og gave me 90 days on the tether. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2077 |
Ever heard of a Denver Boot? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2078 |
For New Years, I'm not going to "kick it" big like in previous years. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2079 |
let's try another pet. My husband would like a dog but I do not know and it's a good idea. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2080 |
I know I'm always hesitant to new fashion trends, but I don't think a Stegosaurus will make for comfortable footwear. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2081 |
She's waiting for a better apology for groping her in the 80s. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2082 |
How do you like my new leg weight? |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2083 |
Once you discover your core, you must work on it everyday. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2084 |
This situation reminds me of the internet story about Abraham Lincoln and the barking dog. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2085 |
With altitude the wind gets so strong you can blow up balloons like that? |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2086 |
They didn't have these when I was young. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2087 |
It's a big green ball, and I'm sorry, but you were only allowed one question. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2088 |
Wanna see my abs? |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2089 |
I’m skipping the middle man. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2090 |
Yes, I'm a yogi and it is BPA free. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2091 |
The secret to happiness is solitude, meditation, and ergonomic seating. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2092 |
I'll have to admit having this large lizard clamped on my ankle is a nuisance, but at least people no longer notice my large nose!! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2093 |
Can I keep him, PLEASE !!!!! |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2094 |
Grogg think first take skin off horrible biting log, THEN make shoes from skin, not other was around. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2095 |
And you wonder why I can't break through the glass ceiling. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2096 |
If I step one foot outside the cave, I lose the other one. |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2097 |
At least it's a herbivore. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2098 |
She doesn't like being separated from me |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2099 |
Meet my wife Linda... The original ball & chain... |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2100 |
Today I learned that the earth really is just 6000 years old. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2101 |
I don’t mind staying in the cave, it’s the ankle bracelet that bothers me about house arrest |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2102 |
If 'twas a Leprechaun you'd be looking for he vanished, he did! |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2103 |
Feeding him is easy, but the vet bills will kill you. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2104 |
Got too stoned last night, and they put me on house arrest. Sweet anklet, though, right? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2105 |
It's a home confinement dinosaur. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2106 |
It's my cave-arrest ankle bracelet |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2107 |
When you say something dumb and your subconscious realizes it. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2108 |
Now wait, it might be politically correct to remove my leg so he isn't traumatized, but come on!!!! |
1.0000 |
0.06063 |
17 |
17 |
0 |
0 |
2109 |
Obedience training starts next week. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2110 |
They told me her place was mantrap but I wasn't prepared for this. |
1.0000 |
0.06455 |
16 |
16 |
0 |
0 |
2111 |
Lovely visit, thanks - I promise I'll be by when I'm out of house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2112 |
It was this or a week of hard labor in the rock pit... |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2113 |
The village elders sentenced me to cave confinement for double dipping at the holiday gathering. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2114 |
This really hurts but I think I just invented the wheel clamp. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2115 |
It seemed like it was worth a try after the dog domestication thing turned out so well. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2116 |
My husband doesn't like my thick ankles, so I decided to get plastic surgery. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2117 |
It's my anti- kidnap plan! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2118 |
He cost an arm and a leg but the cave feels so much safer now |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2119 |
The vet calls it "separation angst." |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2120 |
Oh no no no...! This isn’t my breach. I told her I was attached to animals, WHAT??? Sorry. Not MY breach of promise! I told her about my attachment to animals. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2121 |
Honey, you forgot to wear your dinosaur repellent again. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2122 |
The alternative was jail ... |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2123 |
There’s something on your leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2124 |
It's called "home detention". |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2125 |
I have been having a bad day! First I misplaced my glasses and I have been having this mysterious pain in my ankle. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2126 |
Clouseau, you said your stegosaurus didn't bite. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2127 |
It beats Weight Watchers. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2128 |
And, my husband said he was friendly and housebroken. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2129 |
In three weeks I get a boot |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2130 |
They warned me he was a stage 4 clinger |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2131 |
I swore I said 'STEGosaurus' when ordering it... |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2132 |
I wouldn't let him pose for the new mural. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2133 |
Dino is a leg up on my last pet |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2134 |
Its a misdemeanor offense so I'm on herbivore house parole. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2135 |
I was out of milk-bones |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2136 |
He's not cave-trained . |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2137 |
I can't go out tonight. I'm on house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2138 |
I swear he doesn't normally do this. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2139 |
It has a snug fit. I suggest we make loafers out of it. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2140 |
I'm starting a fad. Two weeks and everybody will want one. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2141 |
Don't worry, he only eats Vegans. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2142 |
I assure you, sir. We do not have bedbugs. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2143 |
Don't worry, he's friendly. He's just a little needy. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2144 |
The prosecutor offered us 4-6 months or cave confinement with ankle bracelet. I think I need a new lawyer. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2145 |
It would be superfluous to say he is very attached to me |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2146 |
Santorum warned us ! I should have listened |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2147 |
The ankle monitor chafes a bit, but all in all being placed under cave arrest is much better than jail. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2148 |
Its all right, it lost its teeth mistaking small round boulders for dinosaur eggs. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2149 |
It's an anklosore. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2150 |
I'll catch up once they deliver the mastodon jerky. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2151 |
There's something on my leg-osaurus |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2152 |
We're still trying to decide if this species can be domesticated. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2153 |
The Police ran out of ankle bracelets. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2154 |
The fire was awesome. But I would push back this "wheel" thing, and move up a muzzle… Definitely, a muzzle. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2155 |
Thanks, but I think I need to stay home and start dealing with his separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2156 |
I can't wait till we evolve depth perception. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2157 |
Albatross? What albatross? |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2158 |
Doctor Urg says we've made real progress with his Disinhibited Social Engagement Disorder. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2159 |
He says that he likes me or maybe that he licks me |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2160 |
Synchronized naked dancing! Now! It's bound to distract him. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2161 |
He doesn't bite. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2162 |
My resolution? Shed some weight. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2163 |
Hmm. I'm not sure. Should we get another pair of eyes? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2164 |
All I did was give him the command, "Sit Trump, sit." |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2165 |
We feel it would be best if you would find a place of your own |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2166 |
Some sort of growth. Doc says I have to have an operation to remove it. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2167 |
Sometimes you eat the euoplocephalus and sometimes the euoplocephalus, well, he eats you. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2168 |
I have to wear it everywhere until I go to trial. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2169 |
I wish I had my club with me but I don't have a concealed carry permit. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2170 |
He's a fear-biter. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2171 |
Thor Thunderbach - The Father of Domestication |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2172 |
Perhaps domestication is not for another ion or more |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2173 |
We really got attached to each other! Can I keep him? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2174 |
No, I have not read Moby Dick, why do you ask? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2175 |
It's my wife's mother, she's just staying for the weekend |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2176 |
He goes with me wherever I go. He's attached to me. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2177 |
It's the newest thing - a dyno-doggie door. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2178 |
Well, just look on the bright side! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2179 |
He's here all right, but I had to drag him. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2180 |
I've been trying to send it back. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2181 |
I can't stand this ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2182 |
It’s not a breed problem! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2183 |
I thought leg hold traps were illegal. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2184 |
Can I keep him, Ma and Pa? Can I keep him? |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2185 |
He says he wants to be my pet |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2186 |
I have no idea what it is but Ralph brought it home from the dinosaur pound yesterday and he has been on my leg ever since! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2187 |
It's his punishment for eating my ankle monitor |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2188 |
It's starting to teethe. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2189 |
Well it is cuffing season... |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2190 |
You are right; I really do need to call the homo sapien rescue! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2191 |
I'm under house arrest until the arraignment. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2192 |
boo |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2193 |
If I had furniture, this wouldn't happen. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2194 |
It’s called a “pet.” Her name is Fluffy Truffy Fuzzball. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2195 |
House arrest. Leaving the cave risks instant pterodactyl attack. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2196 |
They want this to be much funnier than the last caveman cartoon. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2197 |
He also does the grass. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2198 |
I would love to go, but travel is such a drag. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2199 |
Unfortunately this is his forever home. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2200 |
He wants to be fed. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2201 |
There's no such thing as a free mattress. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2202 |
He thinks I’m his key to the Neolithic Age. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2203 |
I’ve tried to return him but the pound says he’s extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2204 |
You didn't say what kind of meat. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2205 |
Millie's cat is warming up to me... |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2206 |
He is afraid of becoming prehistoric! |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
2207 |
Actually, its "Haaar-RHEEEEEE-Yuh-Yuh-Yuh" is far worse than its bite. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
2208 |
It's more touchy feely than a leash. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
2209 |
I'm still on parole. Last week's saber tooth tiger was much worse. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
2210 |
I think I prefer a dog or a cat. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
2211 |
I’m getting an idea for footwear. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
2212 |
We thought he'd be easier to train. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
2213 |
We've conditioned him to re-direct his impulses. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
2214 |
How green was my valley? This is all that's left, son. |
1.0000 |
0.03637 |
28 |
28 |
0 |
0 |
2215 |
This dino ankle security bracelet allows me to move about okay and it is way better than being locked up in a cave. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2216 |
Although possessive, legosores can become great pets. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2217 |
Don't worry about Dino, his growl is worse than his bite |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2218 |
His name is Harry. He's got attachment disorder. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2219 |
fuckfuckshitfuckgoddammitfuckgoddammitmotherfuckershitshitfuckpissshitassdickfartfuckfuckshit. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2220 |
She's really very gentle. She only bites when she meets new people. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2221 |
It's a game of chicken. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2222 |
You wouldn’t call it a pearl of wisdom if you were two birds in the bush. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2223 |
I mean, sure, house arrest stinks, but the outside world is worse. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2224 |
It's a birthday gift from my husband called a Denver boot |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2225 |
Split levels. Great garage space. But really tough enforcement of mortgage payments. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2226 |
It’s a food desert in this neighborhood and Rocco only eats raw-organic. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2227 |
His brother is the nasty one. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2228 |
Yes, but my unsupervised cave leave is worth the inconvenience |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2229 |
He's better behaved than it looks like. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2230 |
We warned you a lockodillo costs an arm and a leg |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2231 |
At least he isn't writing on the walls. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
2232 |
I promise to walk him, and train him and feed him everyday! |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
2233 |
Ouch, my shin. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
2234 |
His owner will be back on Wednesday. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
2235 |
He claims copyrights on my Lacoste dress. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
2236 |
It's a security device. I call it a 'boot.' |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2237 |
No, not exactly a rescue... |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2238 |
It's my wife's and my first child - I read that they call this 'teething'. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2239 |
I'm sorry that I can't give you a leg up. |
1.0000 |
0.05407 |
19 |
19 |
0 |
0 |
2240 |
I didn’t imagine my cave arrest monitor would be so bitey. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
2241 |
He's actually an herbivore, so I worry what paleontologists will think if he doesn't let go. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2242 |
He said he's tired of me putting my foot in my mouth. |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2243 |
I have named him Al, Al Franken |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2244 |
The hunt did not go well and he no longer sees me as alpha. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2245 |
Judge Gronk's orders: house arrest and monitoring anklet. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2246 |
It's really more of a mutual relationship than it looks! |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2247 |
There goes 33% of humanity |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2248 |
It's the only way he'll go out to go potty. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2249 |
First one to blink dies. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2250 |
He's still too primitive for training. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2251 |
She loved her bath, so I thought I'd try to milk her. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2252 |
I'm more hurt that he won't condemn the Alt-bite. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2253 |
How do you like the New Tyranno Rex Leg Trap, stops them dead in their tracks |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2254 |
Full domestication is still a millennia or two away. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2255 |
My advice? Buy a good exercise ball. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2256 |
Look, she sees right through the crocodile tears. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2257 |
What can I say? He's a cavebody. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2258 |
I told you I was under house arrest! |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2259 |
This is what you get for having pets. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2260 |
Have you seen my other sockasaurus anywhere? |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2261 |
I don't think we should count on a speedy extinction. |
1.0000 |
0.03922 |
26 |
26 |
0 |
0 |
2262 |
For a docent, her knowledge goes really far back. Don't you think she deserves a tip? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2263 |
Aiming for "man's best friend" but it turns out breeding is a lot trickier than I thought. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2264 |
I told him my brother would make a much more tasty meal. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2265 |
I get two-day delivery on everything! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2266 |
I was thinking of calling him Cujosaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2267 |
He's outgrown my carry-on. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2268 |
We are emotionally and physically attached. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2269 |
He's giving me a leg's up. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2270 |
Mom, Dad... I want you to meet my new girlfriend. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2271 |
I’m telling you; bait prices have gone thru the roof |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2272 |
He ate the dog so of course we have to keep him. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2273 |
I think I forgot to feed it. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2274 |
He only bits me, not strangers! |
1.0000 |
0.05717 |
18 |
18 |
0 |
0 |
2275 |
Do you either of you have pet store alligator treat you could lend me ... right now? |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2276 |
Ugg Ugg OW! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2277 |
Blue passports man. We've got blue passports. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2278 |
The landscaper is a bit aggressive. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2279 |
Looks like Muckle wants her din-din. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
2280 |
It took some time for the concept of pets to sink in. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2281 |
he is just a puppy |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2282 |
Louise, I'm not leaving the prehistoric theme escape room with only one leg, I don't care how long we have to stay! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2283 |
I call her “New Yorker Humor” because she’s got no taste. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2284 |
Everyone warned me that Walter was codependent but this is a bit much |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2285 |
I don't know what it is. He liked your last boyfriend just fine. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2286 |
As soon as I pay the 12 stone penalty, I’ll get my wagon back |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2287 |
Just don't turn your back on my pet anklesauris |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2288 |
So why would I want to steal anything from your cave? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2289 |
I'm not certain but I think it's a Legissoreas Heck. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2290 |
We're in the process of cave-training her. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2291 |
You think this is a problem - the pterodactyl just learned to fly and is trying to poke my eye out! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2292 |
He hates being left behind; it shouldn't be more than a flesh wound. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2293 |
The sitter canceled so I brought the ankle biter. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2294 |
I would have swiped left. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2295 |
He doesn't want to 'Go Home.' |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2296 |
In the future this will be called and ankle monitor |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2297 |
Actually, when I asked, "if your ankleasorus bites?", ...I assumed that this was your ankleasorus. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2298 |
He says it's yummy. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2299 |
She gets jealous on poker night. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2300 |
You may have discovered fire but I discovered separation anxiety! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2301 |
I know I've bailed on dinner before, but this time I'm really caught up in something. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2302 |
We've signed him up for obedience school, but the class doesn't start until next Monday. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2303 |
I shouldn't have gotten a rescue, the separation anxiety is killer. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2304 |
I look like a treat. Man is it hard to house break this guy. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2305 |
We're going to hold up here for the Ice Age, you're welcome to join. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2306 |
Science is right, we can't co-exist |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2307 |
he says he wants to show me his secret blend of herbs and spices. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
2308 |
Plato said it was just a shadow, and I believed him. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2309 |
He's part of Betsy Devos' new loan repayment incentive program. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2310 |
I don't care if it takes me a million years, I'm going to domesticate something around here! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2311 |
He's a LabraSaurus Retriever |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2312 |
Stegosaurus Whisperer counsels owner to establish new alpha male of the house. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2313 |
I'd love to go with you guys, but I can't leave the cave 'til after the trial. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2314 |
Og says he’s just teething, but you know what a joker Og is... |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2315 |
Down by the swamp, these ankle bracelets are a dime a dozen. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2316 |
Can we keep him? Please? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2317 |
Separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2318 |
Roomba |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2319 |
Petfinder said he was herbivore. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2320 |
He stopped chewing the curtains. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2321 |
The rescue agency said he'll outgrow it. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2322 |
Fluffy needs some anger management but I'm sure she'll grow out of it with your love and affection. She's free ! ! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2323 |
I think we can now all agree that the ankle-lizards are NOT fake news. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2324 |
WE ARE TRYING TO BOND |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2325 |
He's over his eyeball phase and onto legs now. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2326 |
Welcome to my cave. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2327 |
I would whack it, kill it and eat it, but it’s the last one. |
1.0000 |
0.03175 |
32 |
32 |
0 |
0 |
2328 |
He's a rescue, but if anything he rescued me - except for my leg, which will need to be rescued. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2329 |
So you see, this is how the "bear trap" works. Now someone get this thing off my feet |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2330 |
Since I'm under cave arrest I need to wear the ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2331 |
It's not what it looks like. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2332 |
"They paroled me but I had to be dino-chipped." Jan Griffin, Long Beach, CA |
1.0000 |
0.02985 |
34 |
34 |
0 |
0 |
2333 |
It's painful, but they're vegans. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2334 |
Do I have this evolution thing correct? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2335 |
One minute I was petting him by the fire, and......... |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2336 |
My leg hold trap backfired. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2337 |
No problem...He's current on his Rabies shots! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2338 |
Think of it as a starter home that prepares you for having children. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2339 |
Like my new piercing? |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
2340 |
It hurts to grow apart. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
2341 |
He's not serious; he's always pulling my leg. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
2342 |
He's still a little confused about the fetching command. |
1.0000 |
0.03279 |
31 |
31 |
0 |
0 |
2343 |
He ran out of floss |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2344 |
I forgot the chicken password |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2345 |
I'm teaching him rough-and-tumble play. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2346 |
They put me on house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2347 |
He's easy to take care of but he suffers from separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2348 |
It's the latest craze - a dyno-doggie door. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
2349 |
He's a "leg up" up on me, but we co-exist |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
2350 |
Only way I can keep him from running away from home. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
2351 |
Yeah, he's sort of cute; but I can't wait for Stuffies to be invented. |
1.0000 |
0.03509 |
29 |
29 |
0 |
0 |
2352 |
I didn't realize I wasn't allowed to park here. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2353 |
Have you heard of the concept of the pet? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2354 |
Do you have gatorade? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2355 |
We are still negotiating this domesticity thing. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2356 |
I took him in, and he's been attached to me ever since. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2357 |
Sorry, I'm under house arrest at the moment. This ankle bracelet really chafes. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2358 |
He 's absolutely unaware it's a prosthesis. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2359 |
It was a requirement of house arrest |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2360 |
Well, Christmas is over and I may need to rehome this little guy. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2361 |
Just my luck. A monitor lizard for an ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2362 |
And security is included. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2363 |
It's okay, really - I'm sure she's just being friendly. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2364 |
The good news is he's a certified pure bred Stegasaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2365 |
He has a bit of separation anxiety whenever I get ready to leave. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2366 |
And if you act now, I'll throw in an aphorism for four easy payments of $19.99, plus shipping and handling. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2367 |
True. But we have a generous benefits package and can deduct state and local taxes |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2368 |
Your mom was right--success in life starts with good posture. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2369 |
I can’t afford to move, I’m living on my nest egg. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2370 |
My man cave still needs a few adjustments. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2371 |
This house arrest really bites! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2372 |
There is no need for concern because I am as meticulous with my pet’s dental hygiene as I am with my own. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2373 |
I've decided to include him in my drawings. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2374 |
Don’t worry he just has speration anxiety |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2375 |
Not to worry. He'll be prehistoric in million or so years. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2376 |
I've been thinking about switching to a standing desk. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2377 |
I was only standing for a minute waiting for my wife and the damned Department of Transportation snapped this boot on me. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2378 |
The vet said he has attachment anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2379 |
It's a "human trap". |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2380 |
It's kind of a symbiotic relationship. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2381 |
It's my ankle lock I'm under house arrest |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2382 |
They have me on house arrest until the trial. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2383 |
She's a bit clingy but I noticed we get less mice in the cave! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2384 |
You guys go. I don't want to be a drag. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2385 |
Not to worry, just a temporary tapir lock . |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2386 |
My lawyer told me house arrest was a good deal. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2387 |
I’m confined to 30 feet of freedom and then he bites! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2388 |
My resolution this year is to lose weight. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2389 |
I'll just wait until he becomes extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2390 |
Take me to the intensive cave unit! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2391 |
Shhhh.... The dog does not like surprises |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2392 |
My wife wants me to stay home tonight. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2393 |
As long as he doesn't make me come to all his stupid petroglyph exhibits, he's still a better roommate than Fred. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2394 |
Can’t wait invent they invent the balk and chain |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2395 |
I'm trying to ween him off the local dinosaurs. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2396 |
Me and my wife were playing with ways to spice up our love life. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2397 |
Ever hear of separation anxiety? Bella decided this was the best way to deal with hers. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2398 |
Only one more week of house arrest and I'm a free man. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2399 |
At least with Steggie, there are no attachment issues. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2400 |
I feel like a leg end in my own time. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2401 |
He ate the pitbull, my husband and the cleaning lady. He left the conoli's. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2402 |
They wanted to put some teeth into my ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2403 |
I'm on parole. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2404 |
He lost his rubber chicken. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2405 |
I’m on this thing called house arrest... |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2406 |
The parole officer said I can't leave my cave without it. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2407 |
Guess who's coming for dinner? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2408 |
Ouch. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2409 |
I just got an idea for a critter removal service. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2410 |
I can't go out tonight. I got a dinosaur on my leg. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2411 |
If you don't let him know you're the alpha male, he'll eat you for lunch. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2412 |
Attachment parenting |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2413 |
He is not entirely clear on the meaning of "Heel". |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2414 |
It’s really just a sign of affection. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2415 |
I've invented a "Cave Security System," but it still needs some adjustments. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2416 |
He followed me home. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2417 |
I feel a draft |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2418 |
This is what I meant by I couldn't go hunting. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2419 |
I really put my foot in his mouth when I decided to take him home. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2420 |
I stood in a NON RESTING zone. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2421 |
The jail ran out of ankle monitors. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2422 |
He's afraid I'll leave him. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2423 |
So, who’s hungry? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2424 |
The judge put me on house arrest |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2425 |
I'll be glad when boots are invented. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2426 |
This domestication thing is really starting to catch on. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2427 |
She’s mad because her root vegetables were under-cooked. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2428 |
I think I’ve invented an animal trap. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2429 |
This is the new house arrest bracelet |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2430 |
Krog wear ankle monitor lizard until trial. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2431 |
It's leg day |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2432 |
Dude, I can't believe they booted me just for jaywalking! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2433 |
I am optimistic things will improve with commercialization of ankle bracelets |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2434 |
It’s the beginning of a charm bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2435 |
You know, house arrest . . . |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2436 |
He's not quite cave-broken. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2437 |
This proves it! 60 seconds is enough time to move the rock in front of the door before security system activates! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2438 |
He just started teething. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
2439 |
No worries. He’s just got a craving for leg of human. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2440 |
I have to wear an ankle monitor. Someone gave me a tip on Stone Ax futures. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2441 |
When I told the shelter I wanted a rescue, this is not what I had in mind. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2442 |
He came with the cave. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2443 |
It's not an exercise ball, it's piles. You try sitting on cold rock for years on end! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2444 |
It is impossible to get down from here. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2445 |
You’re obviously not on the ball! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2446 |
I know, I know, I should put him on one of those long whatchamacallits. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2447 |
I’d love to go out with you guys but as you can see, Rover, suffers from separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
2448 |
My lawyer got me off with cave arrest with an ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2449 |
The pet store people told me he has been trained to clue me when he needs to go for a walk. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2450 |
I ran out of Dino treats. |
1.0000 |
0.03077 |
33 |
33 |
0 |
0 |
2451 |
He said it's an ankle bracelet. He said his other wives got used to it. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2452 |
I'm developing a new concept I call the Paleo Diet. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2453 |
I said I think I see a meteor. He didn't like that. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2454 |
It's my last week of house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2455 |
Mail? What the hell is "mail"? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2456 |
I think we need to invent even better ankle jewelry. |
1.0000 |
0.03390 |
30 |
30 |
0 |
0 |
2457 |
He’s almost domesticated. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2458 |
He used to just HUMP! |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2459 |
He's really very friendly once he gets to know you. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2460 |
Another one on my left foot will give me alligator shoes. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2461 |
Couldn't find a collar that would fit. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2462 |
its only a 30 day house arrest |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2463 |
His bark is worse than his... nope, I am quite wrong. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2464 |
I know what this looks like, and I want to be clear about one thing: I wasn't trying to get it to suck my dick. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2465 |
One more day with my home confinement bracelet until I am off restriction. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2466 |
Separate compartments on long flights has made all the difference |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2467 |
He thinks I am the Alpha Male. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2468 |
The judge says that if the jury acquits me, I can take this off. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2469 |
I tried to tell her that I had already paid off all those parking tickets. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2470 |
It won't let go of the past. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2471 |
You see it stops someone from going out and committing more crimes. I'm looking for investors. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2472 |
Moments in Evolutionary History: The Extinction of the two-legged Chicken. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2473 |
I think I found your lost Tyrannosaurus Fillmore! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2474 |
I hear they're working on an electronic version that's not so cumbersome. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2475 |
I dont think I can make it to the Troglodyte Dance, my parents are still mad I cant start a fire. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2476 |
He’s so attached to me, can we keep him? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2477 |
I can't go on the hunt with you today, I have a prior commitment. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2478 |
I didn't even know I was under investigation. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2479 |
His is separation anxiety is worse than his bite. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2480 |
From a discount rug store, why? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2481 |
Because I criticized Trump I have to wear this monitoring device; and feed it. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2482 |
Donald is giving him to Mr Wolff. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2483 |
House arrest isn't so bad. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2484 |
Sorry, man. You should have locked the cave. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2485 |
He's needy when extinction is near |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2486 |
Gernlurf, vacation's over. Time to me in school, right, Mom and Dad? I'll be home in summer. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2487 |
Hey, could you call security company, I think i'm going to be late again. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2488 |
He's become attached since 23andme showed our close ancestral past. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2489 |
Don’t mind him. The love-biting thing is just a passing phase for our little herbivore. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2490 |
I wouldn't mind so much if I had the right outfit to wear with it. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2491 |
Ever since he wondered in here we've been attached |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2492 |
Don't just stand there, go get your clubs!! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2493 |
I have no choice but to report this to the caveowners association. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2494 |
Yeah, my mother says it's a parasite, but we're in love. We're getting married next week in Vegas. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2495 |
It couldn't let go of me, so I decided to bring it back. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2496 |
It's my ankle bracelet for house arrest |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2497 |
His separation anxiety is getting out of hand! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2498 |
It's such a primitive way to track my movements. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2499 |
Oh, Sorry.......Don't worry.....he gets hungry when he meets new people. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2500 |
How did you guess he flunked obedience training? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2501 |
They swore he'd stop teething soon! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2502 |
Don't mind him, he's just my paligator |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2503 |
How do you like my new ankle accessory? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2504 |
I'm going to need help with dinner. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2505 |
He gets anxious with new dwellers. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2506 |
Can you change his litter box? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2507 |
This "freak" wonts my leg . Any one have a quick ideal that will "work." |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2508 |
I get a better sleep with an ankle monitor |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2509 |
I thought you said your dog didn't bite. . . . |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2510 |
It came from the drained swamp and Obamacare won't cover the surgical removal. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2511 |
The leash hasn't been invented yet. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2512 |
Our relationship needs to evolve, he is the primordial equivalent of a dog |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2513 |
I told her you’d bring meat. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2514 |
I thought we agreed to meet in Plato's alligator. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2515 |
I can't come along. I am under house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2516 |
He's jealous of the pterodactyl. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2517 |
I’m seeing an orthopedic surgeon this afternoon. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2518 |
He doesn't want to go to dino training. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2519 |
Guess what? We're food. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2520 |
I told you I am not an experienced child sitter. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2521 |
I'm under house arrest for another week. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2522 |
It's an ankle monitor. I'm a T-rex offender. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2523 |
It's Housewifery Rex, and he will never go extinct. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2524 |
He's yours if you want him -- he attaches easily. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2525 |
He's costing me an arm and a leg. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2526 |
Rover-saurus does not like to be left alone! |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2527 |
It is a new program, called "cave arrest." |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2528 |
It's an AlexAndAnisaur. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2529 |
It's all the rage in Pangea. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2530 |
Ankle therapy, it’s new. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2531 |
This house arrest is a drag. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2532 |
Oh no, lol. Of course this is not a ankle monitor. If it were, you'd be the first I'd tell. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2533 |
He isn't fully housebroken, yet. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2534 |
I thought you said your dog does not bite. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2535 |
It is a problem - I can never leave him alone. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2536 |
We've been having disagreements about the rent. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2537 |
It started as nagging knee pain, but it seems to be spreading |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2538 |
It started out as a rash. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2539 |
'I guess he loves me." |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2540 |
Train him? His brain’s the size of a walnut. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2541 |
No, I need a rescue. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2542 |
What's the price on this Yoga Ball?? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2543 |
Yes, it hurts. But according to Caesar, I’m supposed to be calm and assertive. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2544 |
The previous owner doesn’t want to give it up. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2545 |
Love bite. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2546 |
I'm on cave arrest till the equinox. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2547 |
I'd love to go out with you but I'm still under caver arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2548 |
Love bite. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2549 |
The doctor said to if it still hurts in a couple weeks I should come back and he’ll get an x-ray. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2550 |
Finn doesn't like it when friends come over. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2551 |
Turns out they come small as well, though you'd never know it from the two-eye media. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2552 |
Try all you'd like to make me stay. I'm leaving you 2 fossils. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2553 |
In another 80 million years it will make a great pet. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2554 |
He's learning "No Bite!" |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2555 |
Why, how did you tear your Achilles? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2556 |
I think your wife is taking that "ball and chain" remark from last week's dinner party too seriously, Jeff. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2557 |
I was trying to drag her back by her hair and she bit me. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2558 |
I guess I won't be playing bridge this afternoon unless you let him be our fourth. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2559 |
Don't worry, his bark is worse than his bite. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2560 |
I knew this might happen. It's the dreaded legadillo... |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2561 |
He’ll let go at dawn. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2562 |
He just gets a little nervous during meteor showers. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2563 |
It looks like your trap failed buddy, better luck next time! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2564 |
He disappointed Im back before sundown. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2565 |
He'a dragoning me but won't let go! |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2566 |
I swear a rock killed him. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2567 |
I think it's a painful case of right limb separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2568 |
I’m in cave confinement. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2569 |
I"m not hungry, I already had a bite. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2570 |
Sorry I cannot come over. My little friend wants me to stay home |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2571 |
I thought the Chief would shun me, but I just got cave detention. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2572 |
Wait til you see him roll over! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2573 |
Because green is my favorite color. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2574 |
Posture, my son, it's all about proper posture. |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2575 |
Hello, Sisyphus, thou Sissy-Face! So now, just roll this ball back on down, and keep on rolling! |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2576 |
If he could bark it probably wouldn't be worse than his bite. Owww. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2577 |
at least it's not a monkey on your back |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2578 |
In the old days, we had to use a hand axe. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2579 |
Ok, I’m undocumented, but they’ve got to come up with a more lightweight ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2580 |
I'd better say no for tonight--he's been acting out since I went back to work. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2581 |
Sorry guys, I’m still on house arrest for another two weeks. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2582 |
I wish I'd heeded your warning -- she IS a man-eater. She's chewed me up. I just hope she'll spit me out. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2583 |
A rescue hatchling. Quite rare since that last extinction event. Can you recommend a professional trainer? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2584 |
He's a bit clingy, but I feel wanted. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2585 |
He's just a little saur at me right now. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2586 |
I don't leave home without one. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2587 |
can you please help me get this leg out of my mouth? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2588 |
A perfect pet for us—fierce but knows when to stop. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2589 |
Find a pet somewhere else, I am all he has to hold onto |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2590 |
This is Harvey who is very attached to me and needs comforting since none of his friends wants to be around him anymore. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2591 |
He’s always had a leg up on us. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2592 |
Obama care had it's hold on us for years, now maybe we can move forward out of this cave. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2593 |
Am I setting a bad precedent by keeping an animal around? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2594 |
Since it was outside of the usual hunting hours, I can't put in for a Workers Comp claim. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2595 |
I'm letting him get used to trusting me. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2596 |
And they s |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2597 |
In our own ways, we both suffer from separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2598 |
... yada, yada, yada ... |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2599 |
I was just tickling him. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2600 |
I must say, this yoga ball are by far the best invention. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2601 |
Welcome, stranger. Linger and savor our organic retreat. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2602 |
When fecundity and mortality go wrong, this is what happens. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2603 |
This is much better. We used to be attached at the hip. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2604 |
I know the Air BnB listing said ‘No Pets’, but really she’s a sweat heart. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2605 |
The judge says I have to wear this ankle bracelet until the trial is over because I am a flight risk. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2606 |
No worries. Hs bark is worse than his bite. |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2607 |
Bootisaurus...this cave has a strict policy. Can you lend me some clams to get this thing off me? |
1.0000 |
0.04446 |
23 |
23 |
0 |
0 |
2608 |
I put it on eBay because we don’t go to the beach that often. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2609 |
Don't bother setting an extra place. He says he's not hungry. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2610 |
Since we have not invented shoes yet, he decided a bit of leg chewing was in order. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2611 |
...but we agree on what temperature to keep the cave. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2612 |
Don't you know striped animals? They hurt me. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2613 |
Made in the USA Shoe Manufacturing is rough out here these days. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2614 |
Steg, had a bone to pick about guard duty. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2615 |
We've grown attached. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2616 |
He may be an ankle-biter, but he's MY ankle-biter. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2617 |
His kind lived during the Mesozoic era, not the Stone Age. "I must be dreaming", I told him. "Pinch me". |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2618 |
It’s the latest innovation in hair removal. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2619 |
He holds me back. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2620 |
We stay home on vacations. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2621 |
Wow. Nice ankyloset. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2622 |
this is just temporary until the steel prison bars are ready. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2623 |
The house arrest bracelet comes off as soon as I agree to stop questioning authority. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2624 |
I get it off when I pay my jaywalker's fines. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2625 |
Sure, you did fire and you did the wheel. I just invented acupuncture. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2626 |
It's called house arrest. He let's go in a month if I don't drink. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2627 |
When Sylvia left him I told him should get a dog |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2628 |
I'd like to kill it, but it's an endangered species. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2629 |
Separation anxiety. Know any good Dino-trainers? |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2630 |
He has an attachment disorder. |
1.0000 |
0.04256 |
24 |
24 |
0 |
0 |
2631 |
Sounds fun guys, but the judge is keeping me on house arrest for another two weeks. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2632 |
My doctor thinks leeches are just a fad. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2633 |
This is my new ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2634 |
Can I keep him? He followed me home and for some reason I dont want to eat him. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2635 |
I do this when I can't get to Barre class. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2636 |
It’s an Ankylosaurus monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2637 |
Pretty, pretty, pretty ugly |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2638 |
You know, there are always some little things to put up with when you move into a new cave. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2639 |
I'll take care of him, Mom, I promise. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2640 |
Herdy, what the fu— You wouldn’t understand. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2641 |
He's very clingy and affectionate. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2642 |
It's a new weight loss thing. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2643 |
Sometimes it's just the price you pay for being a committed relationship. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2644 |
I'm still under cave-arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2645 |
Honestly, it doesn’t look that bad. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2646 |
He wasn’t drawn on the walls, so I thought I’d bring him back for a closer look. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2647 |
Dinner will be a little late. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2648 |
It's bad enough that his jaws are locked on my ankle, but what if he has tetanus!! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2649 |
Not fetch,....Fletch. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2650 |
Apparently, the Judge said I have to wear this ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2651 |
I just got an idea for a new line of leather hats and the material is free. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2652 |
I've had possessive pets in the past, but this is ridiculous. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2653 |
I’m calling it Footware. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2654 |
It’s he latest thing in house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2655 |
No worry, it's just the way they're taught to floss. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2656 |
Spikey’s training to be a carnivore. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2657 |
The doctor is experimenting with smaller aquatic bloodletting creatures as well, but for now he’s only prescribing what he knows will work. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2658 |
It seems like a technology we might want to copy! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2659 |
They told me that they just use a specially trained officer to monitor my activities. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2660 |
I didn’t say he was a perfect pet. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2661 |
At least this breed is dying out. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2662 |
Only losers try to domesticate wolves. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2663 |
He's a funny little guy. Always pulling my leg. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2664 |
It’s supposed to be great for getting rid of cankles. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2665 |
Shake a leg! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2666 |
ANYONE CAN SEE THAT MY WOLFF IS BIGGER THAN YOUR WOLF. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2667 |
I won't be able to join for dinner, unfortunately. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2668 |
Can't leave the cave because of the ankle monitor. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2669 |
A well behaved pet is a comfort. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2670 |
He gets nervous around people he doesn't know. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2671 |
Welcome, my Legmadillo just loves visitors. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2672 |
Being under "cave arrest" really BITES, dude! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2673 |
I’m a chewy. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2674 |
I'd really love to go but...house arrest, you know? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2675 |
Thank God I didn’t train him to go for the throat. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2676 |
No big deal. I have to wear it on my ankle while I'm under house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2677 |
I keep my word balloon empty. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2678 |
Lotus Shmotus |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2679 |
It's called an Arealasourus |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2680 |
Of course it qualifies as an Emotional Support Animal. |
1.0000 |
0.03774 |
27 |
27 |
0 |
0 |
2681 |
Glad you’re here to photograph the next cover of my magazine, “making the most of small dark spaces”. Hope you don’t mind I’m still under cave arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2682 |
It's just a stage. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2683 |
It's taken a while, but I think he's getting attached to me. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2684 |
Cave man's best friend! Isn't that what you said, Mom and Dad? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2685 |
Your hike has satisfied the commandment. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2686 |
....and then Fred says to me "I did say Dino doesn't bite. That's not Dino!" |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2687 |
Mom, dad, are flush toilets invented yet? |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2688 |
It's a cave arrest glonktite. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2689 |
...the Demerol will kick in before we board. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2690 |
See. My security system does work. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2691 |
We don't really get out much but have plans tonight. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2692 |
You know, I think he likes me |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2693 |
Yes, just now I'm in a pickle, but very soon it'll be in a stew. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2694 |
Think of him as a humane and lively leg trap. |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2695 |
Um. Fred, that isn't what we meant by get a "live trap." |
1.0000 |
0.05130 |
20 |
20 |
0 |
0 |
2696 |
I called pest control, but they said the asteroid should take care of this problem. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2697 |
He's very clingy, and has separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2698 |
Cave living...who knew? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2699 |
I was probably going to die of rabies anyway. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2700 |
It's his way of telling me he's hungry. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2701 |
The pet store just had Hilary or Donald. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2702 |
My doctor thinks it's gout. All I know is my foot's been dragon. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2703 |
Sorry, can't go. As you can see I'm encumbered by the housearrestosaurus. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2704 |
It won't let be get a leg up on civilization. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2705 |
I don’t know much about art, but I know what I like. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2706 |
OUCH! My alligator shoes don't hurt THIS much! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2707 |
The vet said he has separation anxiety. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2708 |
Those calcium pills are really working - I don't feel a thing! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2709 |
Chew toys haven't been invented yet, so I'm filling in. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2710 |
I let him in out of the cold and then he became attached to me. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2711 |
I told him to beg, but he gets the 'b' and the 'l' confused. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2712 |
No, I think it's the platysaurus that has the poisonous saliva. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2713 |
I came up with a new phrase: “Bad Dog!” |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2714 |
The best option is a jaw relaxant. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2715 |
He can wag his tail too! |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2716 |
It's not as painful as when that monkey was on my *back* |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2717 |
Did you bring an air pump? |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2718 |
Does your caveowner's liability policy cover pet bites? |
1.0000 |
0.04082 |
25 |
25 |
0 |
0 |
2719 |
I know, but dogs aren't invented yet. |
1.0000 |
0.04880 |
21 |
21 |
0 |
0 |
2720 |
Actually, here, it's a green-ball-shaped parasitic worm AND my best friend. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2721 |
I was teaching him to stay. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2722 |
This is what my husband gave me when I asked for dinosaur skin boots |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2723 |
Thank goodness he loses his baby teeth in a few days, I can't feel my toes.... |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2724 |
His training is not complete yet. He's supposed to protect the cave from strangers. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2725 |
I'm under house arrest because the judge thinks I'm a flight risk. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2726 |
Thank God my lawyer's a real T-Rex. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2727 |
Can I keep him?! Can I keep him?! Please, pleaee, please! |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2728 |
I know they don't allow pets but he's hard to let go. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2729 |
All he eats is chicken. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2730 |
This isn't so bad. When he sleepwalks, that's the problem. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2731 |
No prison time, but I did get 6 months home confinement and have to wear this ankle bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2732 |
I’m kinda over the locavore thing. Apparently he isn’t. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2733 |
Whatever you do, don't look at him. We're working with Caesar Milan. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2734 |
It's the latest Pandora anklet. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2735 |
He thinks I'm his Momma |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2736 |
It's my new Ankylosaurus bracelet. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2737 |
I can build a better mouse trap. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2738 |
Man's first eviction notice. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2739 |
Monitoring bracelet’s beginnings |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2740 |
Fluffy wants to go walkies. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2741 |
Don't keep him as an 'indoor pet'. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2742 |
I'm calling it a purse for now. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2743 |
You know I’d love to go, but tribal council has me under house arrest. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2744 |
It was house arrest for 30 days or work cleanup in the Mastodon quarry for a week. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2745 |
Some might say he gets very attached. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2746 |
I’ve been placed on house arrest . . . A mammoth mistake . . . |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2747 |
To be honest, I thought cave arrest would be a lot easier. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2748 |
He can’t find his chew toy |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2749 |
Only six months of home confinement, -which is way better than the public stoning I was facing. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2750 |
He's in the teething stage. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2751 |
He isn’t cave broken yet. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2752 |
I've come up with another word for leg: bait. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2753 |
The pet store insisted he was a plant eater. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2754 |
He has separation issues |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2755 |
I thought we had agreed to ban leg hold traps? |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2756 |
I named him Al, short for Albatross. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2757 |
I think it's called Foot In Mammoth Disease. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2758 |
There was a recall on the electronic ankle bracelets. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2759 |
I feel her pain. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2760 |
I didn't intend to skip the school today. See, Danny didn't want me to go to school. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2761 |
I've got a meat grinder malfunction. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |
0 |
0 |
2762 |
The Flintstones reboot proved more challenging than anyone had anticipated. |
1.0000 |
0.04652 |
22 |
22 |