Contest #591


Cartoon

591


Name Value
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Voting started -
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Number of captions
Number of responses
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Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 My methods are Jungian. Sometimes a bar of soap *is* just a bar of soap, you know... 2.0037 0.00367 273 0 272 1
1 Some of my patients find the loofah less threatening. 2.0036 0.00251 562 0 560 2
2 It'll keep you Jung. 2.0000 0.00155 645 0 645 0
3 I hope you don't mind. My couch is brand new. 2.0000 0.00251 563 1 561 1
4 Immersion therapy washes away the guilt ... and exfoliates as it cleans. 1.9984 0.00159 629 1 628 0
5 I know, but you had to spend twenty minutes filling the tub. 1.9952 0.00480 209 1 208 0
6 Come out John! Are you afraid of this brush and soap? 1.0625 0.06455 16 15 1 0
7 We'll start with cleansing and transition to meditation. 1.0625 0.06455 16 15 1 0
8 I'm confirming your coworkers' diagnosis of psychosocial skill disorder and that it can be cured with this therapy. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
9 First, we start with a clean slate... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
10 Do you want to be cleansed of the dirty thoughts you hold? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
11 To overcome your phallophobia, the first step is to clean your penis with this brush. Please take it, and the bar of soap, and then rate your level of anxiety between 0 and 10... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
12 Normally I'd apply a Freudian approach to address problems of self-control, but in your case I prefer to see you wash your mouth out with soap. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
13 I found the cure to your funk. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
14 The little fish eat away all your excess baggage. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
15 First we will do a complete scrubbing. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
16 Given the (ahem) intensity of today's abreaction session, I suggest concluding the cathartic bathing ritual with a thorough scrubbing of the pre-scrotal cortex. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
17 I'm telling you, my therapist has a habit of always brushing away my most intimate thoughts and fears. I think I need to find someone else. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
18 Now scrub away the shame. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
19 I hope you like our new feature, "Pumpkin Spice Mud Bath" 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
20 You didn't specify which treatment you wanted. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
21 Now it is time to come clean. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
22 Womb therapy is au courant on the upper west side. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
23 I sense there's a lot more below the surface. 1.0000 0.00021 4861 4861 0 0
24 You have insecure dyslexia, and no your tub does not look big. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
25 Tell me again about how much you loofah your mother. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
26 Careful, it gets Freudian slippery. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
27 You're going to come clean, one way or another! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
28 Now that you've overcome your fear of drowning we can work on your fear of large toothbrushes. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
29 Now you have to wash that girl right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
30 Aromatherapy is in both of our interests. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
31 All you need is a good back scrub. Unfortunately, our time is up. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
32 'About there you should be getting hints of cinnamon punctuating the notes of oak' 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
33 This should help you to think back. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
34 We can go over time, but it'll cost scrub-a-dub-double my usual rate. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
35 The treatment generally takes just ten sessions to wash away your fears. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
36 Remember, it's very important to come clean. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
37 Don't get into a lather, brush it off. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
38 Excessive shrinkage can be a normal variant. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
39 Dear Sir, do you finally feel ready to work the scabies? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
40 Let's get this done! I have other patients waiting... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
41 According to the ancients, you can wash away your fins. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
42 Expunging memories? Sorry, showers just won't work. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
43 Now that you're in hot water, you can try washing away those sins. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
44 I told you not to look at you're dog's facebook. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
45 Help me to understand how I remind you of your mother. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
46 Vot shall vee touch on virst? Ze Oedipal? Ze Cain? Or zose pesky flaps above your thize? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
47 Could help to brush clean the bottom of your brain, too... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
48 Oh, cement boots so out of date now. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
49 Just do whatever you'd normally do. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
50 Tell me more about your lather. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
51 It's called extreme role-playing for a reason, Carl. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
52 Well, yes, I'll grant you that in this case the term 'shrinkage' is uniquely ironic. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
53 So you see the brush coming between you and the soap? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
54 Look, I know immersion therapy hasn't worked for you in the past. But now that we've moved beyond the metaphorical, I think you will see some real results. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
55 Doctor, it was the couch that smelled and not me. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
56 A telemarketer finds another way around the Do Not Call registry. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
57 C'mon, Mom said to scrub. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
58 Yes, Duckie is gone... but he'd never have wanted you to give up bathing. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
59 Your mother sent these over. We can talk more about Rubber Duckie when you finish your bath. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
60 Frankly after a hard day,I'd rather have a cocktail with my man-butler, than have him participate in my bath activity. A guy could get hurt! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
61 Let us take it one step at a time. You hold the soap. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
62 We can rule out free-floating anxiety. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
63 Therapy here relies upon your coming clean. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
64 I will scrub you with this soothing soap and all of your mental symptoms will disappear. Your anxious thoughts will go down the drain and never return. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
65 Your bath fetish needs a purpose. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
66 With our psychic cleansing package, the soap is extra. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
67 The bathtub time machine will help take us back to your childhood. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
68 Shuds up! My hydro-sessions only last 50 minutes. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
69 The mean never feel clean 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
70 And on the count of three you will awake and feel clean. One, two.... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
71 Bruce, I know it's bath sex Wednesday but I have to work tonight. How do you think we can afford all those bath balls? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
72 Wash away your iniquity. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
73 I read somewhere that all of life's problems can be solved with a hot bath. It was on some super basic chick's Instagram, but I mean, whatever, worth a shot. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
74 I'm not sure that water treatment is right for your condition. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
75 Many patients are unhappy about being soaked, but it's an essential step in self cleansing therapy. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
76 So, I think we may need to do this more than once a week... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
77 You're right. I don't feel dirty anymore. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
78 you're sleeping on your side of the family tree tonight 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
79 It's the latest thing. We're calling it hydro-psychotherapy! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
80 no problem, we'll clean up your act. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
81 Yes, I said let’s go back to the beginning and you thought ‘amoeba’. Ok, let’s go with that... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
82 You're in hot water already so you might as well come clean. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
83 Does this remind you of your first experience? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
84 Tell me about your exfoliant. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
85 This isn't what I had in mind when I told you to " relax " 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
86 Just hold still and I'll scrub all your problems away 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
87 It’s just that the couch is brand new. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
88 It's time to let go... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
89 I minored in theology, so yes you can wash away your sins. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
90 Remember to floss tonight 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
91 How many times must I tell you? No chewing on the furniture! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
92 Build it yourself, I don't give a dam. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
93 Birch, not elm. Birch is the color of our home. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
94 Frankly, my dear ... 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
95 NO, Thats for the wall for the Mexican border. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
96 Don't bring your work home! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
97 Okay pal, just drop it! ... don't make me dam you with feint ways. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
98 One tree? Is that what you call busy? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
99 I've always hated you, Harold. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
100 You know they're taking down dams now, don'tcha? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
101 That branch doesn't conform to my wife's aesthetic ideals. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
102 Why do you need one that big? You only have two teeth. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
103 I'd fight you for it if my dental insurance didn't just lapse. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
104 Dam it yourself, Edgar! Can't we ever just have a relaxing afternoon? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
105 I said I wanted a modern branch, not old growth! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
106 or the CO2 volume agreed with the Ranger the dam should reach 150 meters, it seems to me that you are using bushes rather than trunks. Get rid of oaks and fir trees. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
107 Better to live one day and be dammed than a thousand years as a tree! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
108 My house is not your house. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
109 I told you. No renovations! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
110 Forget the dam, the money's in the wall. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
111 Again with the stick? I asked for a pizza. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
112 When you invited me out to dinner, I didn't know I'd be going out on a limb. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
113 Eight hours and that's all you have to show for it!? What's her name, Hal? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
114 Well I'll be dammed. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
115 What are you trying to prove, Chuck? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
116 I'm the new neighbor. I thought I'd bring you something along. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
117 I told you we are going with tile flooring! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
118 You can't just floss. You have to brush too! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
119 That's the last time I'm leaving it to you. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
120 Put it down. I called dibs on that branch. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
121 Cut that out, mister, or your teeth are gonna stay that way!! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
122 Frankly, my dear, I don't...um...no...wait. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
123 With the lumber industry fighting NAFTA and subsequent duties, we can ill afford to take it across the border for our beaver hut. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
124 Okay, we can agree to disagree, but we are still NOT donating half of our living room to that wall! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
125 I sawed her first. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
126 Global warming...dam it! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
127 It's easier if you put some grit into it. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
128 All this to make one toothpick? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
129 I'm afraid we're out of time—we'll have to get to the loofah in our next session 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
130 When I told you to branch out, I didn't mean mine! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
131 See what happens when you don’t floss? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
132 Johnson and Johnson, Masters and Johnson: they all say use soap. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
133 Leaving the warmth, comfort, and security of your mother's womb is the first step in personal growth. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
134 I hope this will bring you some warmth. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
135 How does losing your rubber ducky in the divorce settlement make you feel? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
136 No, no, no. It's aspen for the dam kitchen, not birch. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
137 Just relax, you’re getting soapy, very soapy … now, you’re feeling lonely,very lonely. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
138 I can tell you this, after 40-some years working as a Psychotherapist, people completely live in separate fantasies in their head. Soap? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
139 Soul cleansing is included but ego brushing is extra 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
140 One of Freud's early therapy failures. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
141 I'm ready! Show me the guilt. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
142 Actually, you are scheduled for a fifty minute shower. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
143 Can I interest you in agressive hydro-therapy? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
144 Go on. Pretend I'm your mommy for a moment and let it all out. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
145 ready for a scrub.... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
146 I'll get your back again...when you tell me a little more about the break up. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
147 I don't really believe you're the kind of dirty that can't wash off. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
148 This was not what Clyde had in mind when his wife made an appointment for spa therapy. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
149 This is a safe space to come clean. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
150 Dam, Daniel! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
151 Sure I serve the great unwashed. I just want them to wash first. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
152 Stop! This is a stick-up! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
153 If you wanted a branch, you should have ordered one. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
154 "I'm telling you, 'size matters'"! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
155 Here's the toothpick that you wanted. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
156 Where are you going with the dam branch? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
157 I overlook you taking my morning paper, but you have crossed the line. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
158 It should make a great lintel. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
159 Dam good choice,dear! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
160 Dam it, you gnawty gnawty boy~~!! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
161 You're missing the point. It's not how much "could" you chuck, it's how much "would" you chuck? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
162 He’s way ahead of his time. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
163 What about the infrastructure? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
164 We're obviously beavers, but somehow need to make sure our log-jamming dialogue isn't just filled with single entendre pussy humor? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
165 I just can't see it 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
166 Impressive but can he help us save on car insurance? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
167 Think it's Bansky? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
168 YOU tell him his line work's sloppy. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
169 I think she's a creationist. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
170 It only feels like regular water. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
171 The doctor warned you about snacking between meals! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
172 C'mon now, lets wash those blues away! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
173 Next, we’ll see how deeply you want me to help you clean things up. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
174 I said damn it all, not dam it all. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
175 Measure twice , chew once . 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
176 I'm looking for a place to stay. Do you give a dam? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
177 The bark's worse when you bite. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
178 My dental floss is missing! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
179 Hey, Beav, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
180 So you think that being a beaver is easy, if you're hungry you just eat a part of your home. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
181 Put that back! We're not building a wall! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
182 When this dam collapses and it will, they'll all sarcastically think 'leave it to beaver'! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
183 should he be indicted for all the species he has harassed. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
184 You are so romantic. Is this what they call "jumping the broom"? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
185 I have a gnawing question. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
186 Dam it, damn it! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
187 As the saying goes, a bush in the mouth is worth two in the bird. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
188 You're making us house poor. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
189 I told you "oak", that's birch, take it back. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
190 Now put the dam thing down, we need to talk! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
191 Dam it, I told you not to bite off more than you can chew! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
192 That is not part of the divorce agreement. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
193 Are you going to eat all that? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
194 Give me my dam branch back now! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
195 Hey, buddy, where do you think you’re going with my living room? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
196 Just because you cut it down doesn't make it yours. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
197 Robert, I thought we had agreed on porcelain for the bathroom! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
198 Hey, we are using only recycled wood now. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
199 The problem, Frank, is your work ethic. You just don't seem to give a dam. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
200 Isn't this the one that said "You've got something stuck in your teeth"? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
201 Take that down to the river, dammit... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
202 I'm tellin' ya, put it back right now 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
203 Leave it to beavers. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
204 Mind your own dam business. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
205 No! We said tax reform first, then infrastructure. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
206 hey Beav, shouln't you ask dad before you give that to Edddie Haskell? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
207 You gonna waste that piece on Trump's wall too? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
208 And you speak softly, too. I like that. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
209 The Judge said I get half of everything. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
210 I thought I told you, Arnold. Measure twice, cut once. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
211 Prenup clearly states 'branches gnawed before termination event in no circumstances are quasi-community property.' 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
212 Get your buckteeth out of my dam log 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
213 Hold on, You’ve got something stuck between your teeth. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
214 We will have more trees if NAFTA is cancelled. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
215 Be sure to make it strong enough to withstand climate change. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
216 Incessant chewing, this is a preexisting condition. Claim rejected. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
217 You see, I thought the bath would calm you down. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
218 I had no idea depth psychotherapy involved getting soaked! 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
219 the hour is up, pull the drain, scrub the conversation. next week, we'll build a bridge over your troubled waters 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
220 Now that you are comfortable, let's talk about your childhood. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
221 Sooo...can I scrub your back?" "Are you sure this is a common treatment method for anxiety attacks?" "Of course, trust me! Didn't you see all my degrees on the wall!? 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
222 You chew like a squirrel on steroids. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
223 Go dam'it Beaver 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
224 I'm a germaphobe, too. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
225 Listen Son. Don't you think it would be easier if you bathed at home from now on? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
226 Here. Wake up. You seem pretty immersed in that wet dream. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
227 Sir...., doctors always scrub in!! 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
228 I call it "Immersive Therapy", why? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
229 Don't worry, I'm a doctor 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
230 Donald, you need to start pulling your weight around here. Puerto Rico needs a new power dam. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
231 You can stop chucking. It was a rhetorical question. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
232 Take it from me, kit, the one lesson I've learned is that being eager isn't worth a damn! 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
233 Neglecting the importance of life in the uterus and cleanliness, has limited the effectivness of psychoanalysis. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
234 Now we are going to scrub those insecurities away. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
235 But don’t you see – if the bat had hit the ball this way, it would have gone foul and ba-ding - Mets win. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
236 Can I suggest a larger glass of wine to go with the menu? 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
237 Is this emotionally warming? 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
238 You call this the "start-up" you have been working on?! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
239 Put down the log son, or I'll confiscate your entire 'Leave it to Beaver' DVD collection. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
240 Hey, I think you've chucked enough wood for one day! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
241 Lift with your legs, not your back! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
242 A little sharper point this time 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
243 Just the branches stupid! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
244 Enough with the busy work. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
245 Producing that inconsequential portion thereof does not constitute "giving a dam," counsel! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
246 Melvin, put that down, you don't need anymore fiber in your diet. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
247 Frankly, my dear ... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
248 Dam it! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
249 Build your own dam wall! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
250 I wonder if this dude gives drawing lessons. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
251 Let him finish; then we'll take credit. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
252 Unlike other publications, we don't make mistakes. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
253 Fake news. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
254 I told you not to go beyond "sit" and "stay"! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
255 Primitive Art 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
256 Wood you please pass that over? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
257 Calling yourself a vegan only counts if you are not a herbivore to begin with. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
258 This way you don't have to dream about drowning. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
259 Dr. Lechter, I think this water is too hot. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
260 getting warmer ... but you also must floss 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
261 Today, let’s try to scratch a bit below the surface. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
262 This bathtub is my psychiatrist's assistant. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
263 I'll grab you two towels for the hot dog treatment and then a cold shower with meatballs. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
264 The truth will come out if I rub it in. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
265 Fight your programming...just give me the stick for safekeeping. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
266 2 For 1 Rinse your body, while we clean your soul 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
267 We've done all that can be done with your mind. Now we must scrub the other parts of your body. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
268 There are no dirty thoughts. Just dirty old men. Start scrubbing. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
269 I concur - you are in hot water. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
270 It's either this or the tiny washcloth. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
271 Tell me again about your favorite bath toys. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
272 Imagine you're going through the birth tunnel. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
273 I'm afraid our time is up. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
274 The bar of soap represents renewal... the son supplants his father. The brush, well, sometimes a brush is just a brush. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
275 At least the blood wont literally be on your hands anymore. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
276 First hot olive oil exfoliation, then herbal deep colon irrigation. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
277 I charge $200 an hour plus the towel fee. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
278 Two hundred dollars an hour to ‘soak my troubles’ away? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
279 Don't forget to wash between your ears. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
280 Sometimes a bathtub is just a bathtub. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
281 You think this is hard, wait till you have to brush your teeth! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
282 I'm on standby in case your glasses fog up. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
283 The couch is coming Thursday. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
284 You appear to exhibit an excessive amount of juices to stew in. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
285 I have found it to be the most effective method for letting off steam. Shelley Rodgers, Alexandria, VA 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
286 I think I'm starting to reevaluate my therapist kink. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
287 Now that you've reached your safe place in the initial stage we can move on to the next step. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
288 I try to give all my patients a clean start 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
289 Ok Dr., now that you've scratched my back, I'll start yours. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
290 It's a process. You have to do the work. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
291 This will help wash away your neurotic guilty pleasures. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
292 OK, you wanted to experience submersion therapy. Can we do it my way now? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
293 We start gently like this. We keep Waterboarding just for those issues that are seriously hard to talk about 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
294 Sorry, zee rubber ducky called to cancel. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
295 Two more men will join you soon... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
296 Rub a dub dub, here comes the scrub. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
297 And when I gave you the blow-up pillow, how did that make you feel? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
298 No sir, this is not a brainwashing... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
299 Just imagine, you're in the ocean. Don't fight it. You can swim if you try. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
300 And, what would mommy say? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
301 Tell me about the temperature. How does it make you feel? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
302 Were there any significant loofah in your childhood? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
303 Now, I want you to gently descrub your feelings for me. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
304 Sometimes a vash brush is just a vash brush. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
305 I believe I’m in the best position to know when you are ready for a bubble bath. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
306 You've got my back Doc? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
307 To love others you must first wash yourself 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
308 I think it's time that you come clean about what's really bothering you, Bill 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
309 Can you add some bubbles first? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
310 Consider my office your home away from home. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
311 We need to review your expectations for this session. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
312 This really isn't what I had in mind when I said you needed to relax during our sessions... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
313 After this we will work on your potty issues. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
314 Sorry for the late start, my last session ran a little over. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
315 Now repeat after me: "I cannot boil the ocean." 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
316 Don't you worry about this brainwashing I'm giving you. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
317 Ze ''Superego'' iz complazent. We wash ze ''id'' with ze long brush and uze zoap for ze private partz. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
318 I can't believe bubble bath is twenty bucks extra. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
319 No amount of bathing can scrub away the results from last November. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
320 You need to make a “clean” break with these troubling issues. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
321 Crazy bath 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
322 Let's not allow this session to get too heated 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
323 We're going to clean up your act, Mr. Driscoll. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
324 Sometimes a bath is just a bath 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
325 Although I'm your therapist, don't blame me for shrinkage. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
326 I think I have the tools to help you bring that to the surface. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
327 A bubble bath is after next weeks therapy. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
328 This bath will be very therapeutic for your Oedipus complexion. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
329 Frankly your take on full immersion therapy is all wet I'm afraid, Doctor! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
330 I told her I didn't want to go but this is ridiculous! 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
331 I'm fully certified in Rational-Immersion Therapy. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
332 Super man off duty 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
333 This is what happens when you skip your regular session. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
334 Now, let's vash avay da memories... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
335 An OCD house call, okay; but for brushing you, call a pet groomer. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
336 Might as well keep the parts they envy nice and clean 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
337 Fifty minutes, or until you're pruney. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
338 I like my clients clean before I bleed them. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
339 In my brand of analysis, you need to come clean about every part of yourself 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
340 Your wife called. You're in hot water with her, too. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
341 I know I'm up to my neck in hot water, why do you think I'm here??? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
342 You're in hot water, but you have a chance to come clean. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
343 Let's dive deeper. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
344 It's not about the bark...everything doesn't have to be about bark! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
345 I thought you were aspen-free. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
346 I told you birch, I'm allergic to willow. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
347 You always manage to get the bigger piece--you're very a-gnaw-ing. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
348 You know I put Crazy Glue on there, right? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
349 Still working on that dam project, I suppose? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
350 'Spare me the toothy grin, Larry. That log has my miter saw carved all over it.' 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
351 Move that over there 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
352 The irony of this situation may be hard for you to comprehend. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
353 You better not leave that to Beaver! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
354 You got something stuck in your teeth. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
355 I don't give a dam! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
356 Try it with arugula--best pond to table. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
357 We’re not going to anlebto build a wall on our southern border that way. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
358 We haven’t got all day , hurry up dammit 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
359 Stop! You're building a wall on the wrong border. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
360 No I will NOT speak softly, Theodore... And put down that big stick! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
361 Look, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say you're barking up the wrong tree. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
362 Don’t worry our descendants will still give us credit. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
363 Give me that log. Don't you know it's knot poplar? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
364 Don't bite off more than you can chew. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
365 We will not pay for your dam. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
366 You and your dam excuses! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
367 The "reclaimed wood" motif is over, baby! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
368 You're eating us out of house and home! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
369 I keep forgetting why we do this. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
370 Work, work, work. Same dam thing day after day. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
371 Now chuck it! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
372 I gnawed it down. I should get the first bite. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
373 That's my shtick 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
374 This may take forever . . . that bark is bigger than your bite! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
375 I don't give a dam about your excuses! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
376 Take that back, you know pine doesn't match my decor of oak and willow! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
377 Stop making ripples on my side of the pond! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
378 Drop it! I'm EPA. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
379 Excuse me! I'm trying to watch Stranger Things. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
380 You think those things grow on trees or something? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
381 Can you please chew with your mouth closed? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
382 According to the city we need a permit for that branches 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
383 Four out of five dentists surveyed recommend a different branch. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
384 Careful. It's not gluten-free. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
385 I asked you to Dam It.... Not God 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
386 You could of least told me that you were having another litter! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
387 I can't deal with your obsessive compulsive disorder of rearranging the dam any longer 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
388 Build that damn wall! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
389 Harvey, I think it's best we don't use couches anymore. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
390 Today, we're going to try something new! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
391 Here. Use these for those hard-to-reach happy places. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
392 Don't be so uptight. Marat didn't have an analyst or a pillow. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
393 Our time's ip, Mr. Peterson. Next week we'l try adding the rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
394 Careful getting out so you don't make a Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
395 It's the latest in cogni-tub therapy. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
396 I usually have 3 men in tub on scrubbing sessions. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
397 Okay, are we ready to wash those demons right of your hair? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
398 I realize you find me at times abrasive. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
399 ''Dry off. your hour is up." 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
400 Don't throw the baby steps out with the bathwater. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
401 Are you ready for a good analogy? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
402 Many of my clients says this helps the problems wash away. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
403 What if we try to cleanse them away before drowning them? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
404 I understand this is called somatic-work. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
405 Now, tell me about your fear of water. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
406 Relax and visualize not losing the soap in the water. You can do this. I'm right here. The brush is optional. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
407 I was told to see the branch manager, would that be you? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
408 The superego at 117 degrees Fahrenheit, like the ravenous heat-sensitive bedbug it is, bites the big one. So again, what is it you were saying about your father? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
409 I've always wanted to be a figure drawing model...but I'm feeling a little vulnerable. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
410 Out on a limb" dummy, not "chew off a limb. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
411 I've had enough of your dam excuses. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
412 You've got something in your teeth. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
413 Is that all you can carry, you wimp? You'll be my first tweet tomorrow. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
414 The dam's the other way . . . you smarmy capitalist. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
415 Hold it mister, you said I could have Formica in the kitchen. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
416 No, I will not be dammed. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
417 You know I hate knotty pine paneling. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
418 To be honest, today I just don't give a damn! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
419 Alright, wiseguy, where is the rest of the tree? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
420 So I says to the river "You're dammed if you do, and you're dammed if you don't!" 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
421 There a border dispute,they want to down south for a wall. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
422 Is that gluten-free? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
423 Gnaw! Let me show you how. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
424 DAM it! I "saw" that log first! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
425 He says he wants feedback, but he's not as thick skinned as you'd think. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
426 She thinks the smartest should be on top of the evolutionary pyramid. But we can take care of that. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
427 The bath is $75 an hour. But Soap’s $25 and the brush is $50. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
428 When I asked if you were going to eat that you said 'naw'! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
429 Soap is the cure for stench. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
430 First, we'll have to scrub away the shame and guilt in order to get inside to the real you. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
431 Just let it all soak in, Mr. Gacy. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
432 If I bath you, I have to bring in my nurse, and then, you'll have to pay her to. Your choice 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
433 A good first step would be stop calling that water you're wallowing in your "self-pity." 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
434 Build that damn wall! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
435 I Was Dreaming I Was Swimming. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
436 Hmmph! Put down that branch! You know that Trump is opposed to a "big stick" policy! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
437 So this is Immersion therapy. How do you feel about it? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
438 Sorry, Dr. Freud won't be back til next week. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
439 Well, I think we’ve entered the transference phase of your treatment for compulsive cleanliness... 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
440 Now, let’s scrub that psyche. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
441 We’re going to scrub a dub dub all those negative self image voices away. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
442 Can I scrub out some information now? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
443 Now I will scrub you clean of all your dirty memories. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
444 You're not so hot. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
445 Dream on dirty boy and do tell the dirtiest 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
446 Heavy water therapy--it's the new, clear option. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
447 Now vee may perhaps to begin. Yes? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
448 I've actually only passed the Bar exam. For the Brush you'll need to see a specialist. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
449 Diagnosis: you're all wet! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
450 As waters break, you slide deeper and deeper towards the bristles .... 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
451 Soakanalysis 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
452 And how does that make you feel, with 1 being slightly shriveled and 10 being downright pruney? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
453 Now, let's take you back to the scene where you met H. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
454 Ok, that's the hydro covered now let's start on the therapy. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
455 Your fear of commitment will be a thing of the past with this new phobia-replacement treatment... 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
456 I've told you, in order for this therapy to work, you've got to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
457 Yes, you must relive the filth of your origin and then we will wash away your sins and you will be reborn in perfection. By the way, did you leave a credit card with the receptionist. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
458 Reality therapy cleanses the whole person! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
459 Self-esteem sponge or a schizophrenic scrub? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
460 It's the latest version of hydrotherapy. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
461 Just a few more minutes before we get to work. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
462 Do you still mourn for the duck? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
463 If I only listened to Dr. Noah 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
464 And how does that feel? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
465 Freud, Shmoid. Vee find zat der inhibitions are erased mit a gut bath. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
466 You are a fine broth of a lad. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
467 Your psychotherapy will only work if you come clean with me. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
468 You may have taken a bath on that deal, but with your other earnings it should all come out in the wash. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
469 Now, let's turn that frown upside down. I say if when you're emotionally underwater is a perfect time for a little spiritual cleansing! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
470 So tell me about your compulsive hand washing. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
471 what does this tepid bath and scrub brush make you feel? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
472 Care for soap and a luffa while we explore the cesspool that is your life? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
473 Cleanse the body, then cleanse the mind -- Psych 101. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
474 Rub-a-dub-dub therapy has proven effective as now you are down to one. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
475 Are you ready to confront your privacy issue with the brush I had with your insurance company after they accused me of giving you a soaking. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
476 You can just pee in there, I change the water for every patient. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
477 there's no point just stewing about it 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
478 (Singing) "I decided long ago, never to die anyone's bathtub..." 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
479 Professional detachment is necessary for treatment Mr. Jones. But, I am not a loofah. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
480 Welcome to your first quid pro quo session. Let's get started" 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
481 You can add the bubbles once you've reached enlightenment. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
482 Not to put too fine a point on it, but get your chompers off my log! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
483 Its "Office Bathing", stress reduction, the city version of Forest Bathing.... 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
484 My new soap and scrub technique is designed to rid you of those nasty memories. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
485 It's called spachology. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
486 And what did your mother do to you when the bar of Ivory sank? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
487 Clean mind...Clean body...Take your pick. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
488 Frankly my dear I don't give a damn for your dam. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
489 Tell me more about these three men in the tub with you going “rubs dub dub.” 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
490 Scrub away your superego. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
491 "Tell me what you did with the little ruby ducks and then I'll scrub your back". 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
492 To scrub, or not to scrub? When did you first have these feelings? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
493 Now do you understand why I only take cash? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
494 Its time to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
495 I didn't think you would be so literal when I said I want to wash away my sins 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
496 Donald, you CAN bathe without your rubber ducky, but you have to WANT to bathe without your rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
497 This hydrotherapy comes with a cleaning! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
498 You're too eager! Dam it! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
499 We've done a lot of therapy now it's time for some brainwashing 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
500 Do you really want me to rub in your fears? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
501 No, Sigmund Freud has never spoke about salts bath or Jacuzzi 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
502 ...and so that's why I call this type of hydrotherapy "the Mueller". 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
503 Me say, "we learn more words would make more sense," not "wood make more tents". 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
504 Next time, you speak softly, and I'll carry the big stick. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
505 It's at this point in the thereputic process that I recommend that you go soak your head. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
506 You sure that want your rubber ducky? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
507 Think back. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
508 Today, we’re going to purify your thoughts...literally. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
509 Now remember, there is nothing wrong for a man giving another man a rubdown. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
510 Tell me more about the dream you had with the two other men. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
511 This is not how I imagine a spa therapy to be like... 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
512 I think you made your point. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
513 You young whippersnappers don't know nothin' about work. Took you all morning to get that pathetic little twig off'a the tree. For Pete's sake. Ya gotta put some tooth into it. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
514 Have you washed your conscience clean yet? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
515 Now that your conscious is clean, let's get behind the ears. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
516 My contract with your behavioral health provider has just added a mandatory personal hygiene rider. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
517 This isn't what I had in mind when I decided to "cleanse my soul". 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
518 Just remember, when you're up to your neck in it, I've got your back. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
519 We've found this to be more effective than The Hot Seat 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
520 Perhaps it's time for a clean break. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
521 I'd say you are in pretty hot water.... 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
522 You can leave if you want, but that stays 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
523 Tell me about your wet dreams and then we'll clean you up. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
524 Tell me all of your dirty little secrets. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
525 Many of my patients get a soaking for this kind of therapy. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
526 Five minutes left. Time to wash out your mouth. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
527 I'm sorry, we're out of time. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
528 Psychotherapy? I'm sorry, you misheard. I got my doctorate in Spa Therapy. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
529 My bath therapy usually drowns all your problems. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
530 No permit, no building. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
531 It's not brain wash. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
532 PSYCHOHYDROTHERAPY 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
533 After fifteen minutes, you forget everything. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
534 I got your back, just let it out. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
535 Und now for zis year vee try zee soap..yah? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
536 Sorry, but this session should help you with your fear of not being able to swim! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
537 In today's session I would like to explore your darkest recesses. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
538 And when Rubber Ducky left because you were too high maintenance, how did that make you feel? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
539 Scrub, scrub, scrub your brain gently down the drain.... 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
540 Maybe we should try something new today. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
541 The water couch has a leak. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
542 At your parent's age, it is wonderful they still have an active sex life! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
543 Spill your feelings. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
544 And, of course, Psyche Wash is on my website. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
545 Would you not agree, Brian? It is a rather small and insignificant loofah. Now, slowly...take it from my hand... 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
546 Inside The Actor's Bathroom: I'm your host, James Lipton. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
547 Not much I can do to help you out of the hot water you're in. But maybe this soap and brush can clean things up a bit. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
548 It helped Archimedes discover water displacement, it can help you get through your marital troubles 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
549 Scrub those inhibitions. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
550 If my medical water doesn't dissolve your dirty thoughts, I can apply these therapeutic aids. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
551 Come clean about your childhood problems. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
552 Are we in hot water again Sir? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
553 If you are coming to a psychiatrist, you must come clean. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
554 Sorry, the rubber duck drowned last week. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
555 As my dearly beloved mother used to say. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
556 Trust me, I am the father of "Apothecary" therapy. I'am sure you will find it cleansing for the soul. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
557 I did not spend all those years in school for this! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
558 The rubber ducky is not part of the session. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
559 I know you're awash in misery. Help begins with scrubbing your own back. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
560 I know you were expecting a loofah, but I promise the soap is fancy enough for us to make some real progress. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
561 Sure, that's great for the incisors, but you still gotta floss for the sawdust under the gums. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
562 This is a National Forest, you know! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
563 I just keep thinking, there must be a better way to make a pencil. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
564 We are not obstructionists! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
565 What did you think I meant by 'brainwashing'? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
566 Stop bringing work home with you. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
567 You have something in your teeth! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
568 You’ve been gerrymandering this river. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
569 You can keep the river property, but I get the dam house. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
570 Aha, another snack between meals. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
571 If the Executive branch won't stop you, then ledges later, damn it! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
572 I told you, I have a coupon for the building center! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
573 I think we're ready to go deep. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
574 Hey! I saw that room partition first! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
575 I feel uncomfortable with this, Mr. Weinstein. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
576 I don’t know Doc...should I drown myself in my sorrows? Or can you help me brush them off? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
577 While you undergo this new kind of hydrotherapy I will be cleansing your soul... and your back. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
578 This is a new treatment. Back in the womb therapy. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
579 I think the ink blots will scrub right off. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
580 Now you try walking on water. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
581 It's time to wash those blues away. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
582 Hydrotherapy for my passive-aggressive patients. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
583 At this point, I'm honestly not sure who is crazier. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
584 After I scrub your back we’ll proceed with the shock treatment. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
585 We'll be dammed if you do and damned if you don't. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
586 Wake up little one, time for Mommie to scrub you clean. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
587 Be careful you don't slip. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
588 I still feel dirty. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
589 Now wash your mom right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
590 It’s not alternative therapy. You’re just dirty. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
591 It’s a prelude to brain-washing 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
592 " I liked working with dead bodies so much in Mortician school I went right into private practice Spa-Therapy"! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
593 So, in your dream you were Jean-Paul Marat? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
594 Don’t even think about it, Harvey. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
595 Trust me, no one can see you Tub Wetting... 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
596 HEY, clean up your thoughts so we can continue our water therapy 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
597 19 years of therapy; sometimes I think you're trying soak me! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
598 Well my wall is going to be HUGE and beautiful and you will never going to be able to past it. Oh, and you are going to pay for it. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
599 So, let's continue our role-play. You'll be Vladimir Putin, and I'll be Donald Trump. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
600 When I said I wanted you to be comfortable, Dave, this wasn’t exactly what I had in mind. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
601 Now don't make it a habit 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
602 Ok, I've scrubbed the negative reviews, so you don't need to pull the plug, 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
603 IS THIS WHY YOU TELL EVERYONE THAT YOUR GOOSE IS COOKED?? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
604 And you'll want to scrub especially carefully around your sensitive ego... 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
605 Now we'll see who gets to call who “shrink". 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
606 Now, Herr Schmidt, you're going to vash zhat man right out of your hair! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
607 These are here for your use. I'm going to step out for a few moments and will knock before I reenter. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
608 I draw the line at washing your back. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
609 You won't miss the rubber ducky after a few more sessions. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
610 Before we begin, I want you to wash away any negative feelings from your past 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
611 No, this is not part of the analysis. You just really smell. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
612 Yes, I did attend Bath Spa University. Why do you ask? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
613 Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
614 It's the new psychobubble treatment. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
615 Your id needs a scrub. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
616 While a hot bath may soothe the anxious Ego, a hard back scrub will elicit the Id. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
617 Life is so much better when we talk 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
618 "We do not need to scrub your body, we need to scrub your filthy mind." Joe Pitts, Washington, DC 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
619 Don't splash. This carpet is $100 a yard. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
620 And now, I want you to wash your cares away. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
621 Bubbles aren't covered by your insurance." 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
622 I'm not actually a shrink. But I can still wash your back. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
623 Look what you made me do. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
624 You're getting pruney. You're getting verrrrry pruney. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
625 Try not to get soap phobia 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
626 I will now scrub your back to relieve the last of your anxieties 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
627 If you close your eyes, I'm certain it will feel more like mommy's womb. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
628 I really only wanted to cleanse my mind. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
629 Sometimes a full body wash by a man is just a full body wash by a man. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
630 I think you'll find my spa treatments very therapeutic. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
631 You can't get 'em clean without a brush and soap no matter what your mother said. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
632 At $350 an hour you could at least include bubbles. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
633 The tiramisu serves a hundred. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
634 So, you're still accused of being all wet. Huh? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
635 You can clean up what you say. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
636 Sometimes a bath brush is just a bath brush. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
637 Remember acceptance? You weren't transported to the womb, but you still get a nice bath. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
638 Zis is submersion therapy. Now I will procced with cleansing you of all troubles. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
639 It's about time you came clean 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
640 I think we should discuss your interpretation of the concept "immersion therapy." 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
641 Now recall your childhood and your mouth being washed out with soap. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
642 I feel I need to clarify that it's still a 50-minute hour. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
643 You seem steamed 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
644 It's cheaper than the Ritz. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
645 Why water-emersion psychotherapy? His problems started after his wife’s water birth. Apparently the placenta stayed in his hands & the baby sank... If this doesn’t work, I have a brush to give him a spanking ..... 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
646 Let the bath water be your self pity and these your festering resentments. See you next Tuesday. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
647 What did you think I meant when I said: "Cleanse your mind of dirty thoughts?" 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
648 It's a new technique to boost self-esteem, you know: cleanliness is next to godliness. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
649 RUB-A-DUB-DUB. MY TURN IN THE TUB 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
650 No, home tub phobia is quite common. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
651 Now let's continue from our last session. Tell me more about your feelings of inadequacy. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
652 And how long have you had the feeling of being all washed up? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
653 Try these for getting your father's controlling narcissism off your back. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
654 Now tell daddy you’re not too big to wash in the sink. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
655 Please stop focusing on what you've done in the past. This is a more authentic approach to immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
656 I don't want to talk about my mother 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
657 Freudian therapy, before the discovery of the sub-conscious. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
658 I think I left the iron on. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
659 It's all-inclusive. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
660 I love the innovativeness of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
661 Once your delusion is over, I hope you can see yourself in some dry clothes. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
662 We'll start the hard work once you're pruney. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
663 . . . and vhen vee scrub de mind sufficiently . . . 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
664 Brainwashed 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
665 There's something you need to get off your chest. I'll take care of your back. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
666 I hope that's water in there. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
667 ...and what did your mother do now? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
668 And you still think you smell like your ex-wife? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
669 Finally, a way to hypnotize that works! 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
670 Would you mind if I loosened my tie now? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
671 You will feed better when you come clean. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
672 Let’s try to begin. House calls are extra. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
673 First, we discuss excessive multi-tasking .... then you get these back. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
674 As a student, Dr. Stein didn't think he needed to read the chapter on immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
675 First you scrub off all the filthy germs, then we'll talk about your OCD. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
676 Beavers create ecosystems. We do not build walls. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
677 Just gnaw it. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
678 I like to interpret an eddy in the stream of consciousness as a time for reflection and deep cleaning 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
679 Now, we're going to scrub out all those dark crevices of your mind, 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
680 To begin with, therapy is a cleansing process . . . 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
681 It's time to come clean. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
682 Think of it as your id 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
683 What did you think I meant by immersion therapy? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
684 How should I couch this ? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
685 This should put a stop to your fear of drowning dreams. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
686 You know, there are limits to my accommodating your narcissistic sense of entitlement. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
687 so you are afraid the new tax may create a "soak the rich movement?" 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
688 So, how's that working for you? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
689 My advice is to cleanse away those drowning thoughts 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
690 So, just how long have you been wetting your pants? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
691 Your O.C.D. is clearly just in your head Mr. Wilkins. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
692 Okay. How about just the soap? You can still hold it with one hand. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
693 It's time to take your immersion therapy to the next step. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
694 Listen, if doctors can do house visits, so can therapists, Carl. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
695 Sometimes a warm bath is just a warm bath. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
696 I am trying the frog in boiling water approach. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
697 Not sure how much I'm helping, but let me know if you'd like me to do your back. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
698 Agreed. This beats last week's session on the toilet. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
699 It’s your decision whether you want your back scrubbed or to play with your toy boat. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
700 So many tears - I'm worried about my carpet 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
701 Yes, I understand. You are no longer part of his team. Here, scrub and tell me all about it... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
702 In fourteen days you will no longer fear water. Eighteen max. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
703 This is the real reason we’re called shrinks. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
704 It is my professional opinion that you only require the "aroma therapy " package. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
705 Now, sing a few bars of , "Always look on the bright side of life" as you scrub away all that negativity. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
706 You just need to wash that guy right outta' your hair! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
707 We've now come to the essence of bathtub-choice therapy: Do you want the hard scrub, or the soft soap? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
708 How's that workin' for ya? You want me to add some epsom salts? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
709 It's a new form of therapy. I call it 'Washy Washy, Why Do You Hate Your Mother?'. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
710 Now let's go back to your dream in which I have a bathtub in my office. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
711 I'm feeling pretty, pretty, pretty clean. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
712 Do you feel anything bubbling up to the surface? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
713 "No worries. You will NOT be thrown out with the bathwater again !". 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
714 Trust me, it wasn't one of your delusions; it was a real skunk. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
715 Yes, I said come clean. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
716 How do you feel about someone you don't know scrubbing your back? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
717 Yes, Id shrinks. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
718 You only pay for the brush, the soap is free in water therapy! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
719 I can see your problems are behind you. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
720 Even earlier Freud: "I put the soap under your foot when you try to stand up and then you say the first thing that pops into your head." 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
721 You'll have to scrub your own back. I'm a few credits short of that certification. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
722 I told you that hydrotherapy would keep you quite all right 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
723 When you get out of tub, I'll take off my clothes and give you a massage. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
724 Now, about your rubber ducky dream.... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
725 Mr. Therapist, is this really necessary? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
726 Any last words? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
727 Since you haven't been telling me the whole truth, Mr. Miller, I'm offering you a chance to come clean. And your mother said to pay special attention to your back. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
728 I guess I shouldn't have said we could "literally' wash away your guilt. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
729 I like to call it a Freudian Soap 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
730 My turn. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
731 Cold water? That's why they call me a shrink. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
732 Ready to face your dirt? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
733 And how does that warm water make you feel? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
734 Sometimes a bar of soap is just a bar a soap. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
735 We'll talk about it when you cool off. How does that make you feel ? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
736 To clear your mind , we must first cleanse the body! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
737 Due to a pre existing condition, John was in a pool of his own 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
738 it get's easier with practice 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
739 Man in Bathtub. Waterboarding guilt therapy session. waterboarding guilt therapy session. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
740 Sometimes a loofah is just a loofah. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
741 Fear of heights? ... Oh, I thought you had a fear of water. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
742 Pass the soap? No soap, radio! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
743 Hmm. So you forgot to bring a towel. I wonder what that means... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
744 Mental hygiene starts at session two. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
745 I call it washing away your fears. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
746 That's the thing about therapy, you gotta come clean. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
747 Go ahead, but we're still not paying for it. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
748 Today, you regress to the womb. Next week: further back. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
749 Referenced from the chapter “Recovery of the Sex Dream” in The Psychoanalyst's Guide to Quick Fixes. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
750 Trust me. This will jump start the transference/counter-transference dynamics in a big way. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
751 There is a certain amount of self-help involved with my therapies. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
752 Okay. After a scrubbing-down, I’m going to provide you with some snorkeling equipment that – 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
753 Go get your own treats and leave the Dam alone. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
754 Yes, it is less awkward with the couch, but the multitasking potential has me sold. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
755 Harvey, when you said you wanted me to help you clean up your act, this isn't exactly what I had in mind... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
756 Sometimes a bath is only a bath. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
757 Congratultions, chicken soup immersion therapy is not for everyone. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
758 Show me a dirty man and I will cure him for you 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
759 Today we will regress to the Eocene Epoch to see if we can reach the source of your compulsive rock scrubbing. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
760 Have we gotten to the bottom of it yet? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
761 For $40 extra, your psychohydro cleanse becomes a spa day. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
762 You said you wanted to clean your concience. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
763 Would you like I should massage your ego? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
764 Don't you know it's preferable to floss? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
765 Didn't I tell you Mr. Klein, "either change your ways or you'll wind up in hot water"? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
766 Here, maybe this flat rock and over-sized toothbrush will help. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
767 I can't tell you what's in the bath or the soap, but I guarantee this will eliminate the skunk smell. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
768 Rub a dub dub, scrub away your guilt! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
769 It’s either me, or him. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
770 Did you remember to check the elastic modulus? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
771 I told you I wanted birch, go back and don't forget the bread and eggs either. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
772 Anyway, this whole area will be under water in 20 years. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
773 Turn around mister and put that back on my dam exactly where you found it! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
774 I think it will be worth more if the artist is dead 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
775 No, remember: I'm the brains. You're the brawn. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
776 Hey pal, I think you got a little something stuck between your teeth. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
777 One more log and YOU keep it clean. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
778 I had that for lunch. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
779 Go back and do it again, and this time you better look more eager. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
780 If they're all this small, we'll never finish that damn dam. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
781 I will build a great dam, and salmon will pay for it. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
782 Bark tastes worse when you bite. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
783 Another notch cast in stone. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
784 Not so eager! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
785 Secretary Zinke said he will pay us for every tree we can gnaw down in the National Parks. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
786 Damn, damn damn!!! I am NOT paying for another pair of braces for you!! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
787 You can have your hunch back, I have my own. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
788 It clearly states in the divorce papers that I get the last branch! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
789 An American's perspective of Canadians. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
790 I warned you about branching out on your own. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
791 For once can you stop being so damn Canadian! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
792 You seem a little too eager. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
793 I said damn you, not dam it! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
794 Take it back. I can smell that GMO from here. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
795 It lacks a human element. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
796 You have something between your teeth. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
797 No, I said Damn it! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
798 Don't be a tree hogger. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
799 Don't you ever get tired of Branch for Brunch? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
800 Hey! I wanted that for the teepee. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
801 This is not a substitute for flossing! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
802 Didn't anyone ever tell you that you shouldn't give a woman something practical for her birthday? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
803 We’re calling a contractor this time! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
804 We call it mental hygiene 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
805 No, this is not where we floss. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
806 You still have to floss! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
807 That branch has my tooth marks on it. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
808 How many times have I asked you not to bring work home with you? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
809 I don't care if it's a famous tongue-twister, it's offensive to woodchucks! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
810 The orthodontist said that's a no-no. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
811 This new format helps you wash it all away. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
812 Can't you see how wrong it is to ask me to do that, Mr. Weinstein? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
813 We’ve found this therapy most effective for people suffering from the last election. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
814 When the moment is right, tell me how it feels to come clean. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
815 Either come clean or its waterboarding 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
816 Take this chicken bouillon and loofah—you feel the stress just melt away. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
817 Maybe now I can help you to come clean 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
818 I'm here to assist you in the cleansing process. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
819 Less self-absorbed, you won't feel so wet. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
820 A clean body nurtures a clean soul. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
821 Why? Everything isn't all about you, you narcissist. I'm germaphobe, bro. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
822 Pretend I'm your mom. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
823 I’ll give you a rub while we wait for the other two. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
824 I can't absolve you until I know you're clean. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
825 I sadly am a Shrink. Not a Sink. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
826 All this education and I'm suppose to scrub your back? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
827 This is just a precaution since you said you had wounds that weren’t healing. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
828 I don't need a scrubbing I want my rubber duckie 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
829 I shall have to go deep below the surface to address your oedipal complex. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
830 Lesson number one - never, ever trust a bubble. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
831 You're gonna need a bigger tub, Chief Brady. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
832 Oh my...he's recording our existence! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
833 If he thinks this is gonna stop us from eating him, he’s got another thing coming. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
834 One year of art school and he thinks he's the next famous graffiti artist. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
835 His work is ok, but I he doesn't seem to be evolving. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
836 A thousand years from now we’ll get the credit 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
837 Maybe cleaning yourself of filth will help. 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
838 That branch was on my property line and I know it! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
839 “I don’t know about you but I particulary enjoy his bold use of color and the inherent power in his brushstrokes 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
840 What's in it for me if I scratch your back? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
841 Well I'll be damned undammed, if I let you get away with this! 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
842 The aroma therapy is for me. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
843 Considering that the next step is shock therapy, if I were you, I would see if soaping up and brushing away might work. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
844 Trust me, I’m a doctor 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
845 We’ve had some complaints that our hot tub therapy sessions are too intimate. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
846 We’re going to try an alternative to your rubber duck for this week’s immersion therapy session. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
847 Nope won't be any Freudian slips here. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
848 Do I find what you've told me distasteful? Why do you ask?". 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
849 See? Your life is not slipping down the drain. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
850 I've found this works better than the couch for the germaphobe. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
851 We’ve still got some time remaining—may I get in and scrub your back? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
852 This wasn't exactly what I had in mind when you asked for "water therapy" 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
853 Listen, we're not here to talk about my fetish, we're here to talk about yours. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
854 One branch? You don't look very busy to me. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
855 I don't like the color. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
856 Keep your dam hands off my dam branch. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
857 And when you’ve finished flossing your teeth, you can get on with the dam 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
858 Fine, don't build a wall! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
859 The archaeologists will never figure out why the creatures got top billing. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
860 Why the obsession with sharing pictures of their meals in this new media? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
861 Why aren't they using our numbering system? It's so much easier to paint by numbers. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
862 Now then, let's see if we can soak that pesky psychosis away. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
863 What about that comment makes you feel in hot water? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
864 You're under arrest for dismantling the border wall prototype. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
865 You've got a-- actually, you know what? It doesn't matter. We're beavers. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
866 You have something stuck between your teeth 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
867 Dam(n) it, it’s my turn! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
868 Your time is up, so we will bring out the rubber duckies next time 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
869 After the primal steam therapy, I'll try brushing your mouth out with soap and water. 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
870 You’ve changed your mind ... and now want a couch? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
871 " Hey you!...young fellow, stop chewing that thing, any chance have you seen nearby my beautiful old tree? Coulda sworn...! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
872 C'mon,it's my turn 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
873 Don't forget to floss tonight! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
874 taste's like chicken 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
875 If I hear you say 'Leave it to beaver' one more time... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
876 Forget about infrastructure - what we need is a corporate tax cut. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
877 You're barking up the wrong tree. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
878 Make your dam like your mother said or I'll you a new one! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
879 Your wall won't keep me out! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
880 He's just expressing his First Amendment rights. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
881 You're gonna need to get those front ones capped 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
882 Your bite is bigger than that bark. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
883 I'm not going to tell you again; Chew With Your Mouth Closed 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
884 I don’t care if we are large semiaquatic rodents; I’m not living in any more flooded lodges. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
885 I think you're just trying to LOOK busy! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
886 Don't grind your teeth, gnaw. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
887 I work all day and come home to the same slap dash quickie dinner again. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
888 This is a stickup! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
889 'Give me that dam stick!' 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
890 If that's our idea of a peace pipe, go fish! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
891 You're a dam joke. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
892 I'll be dammed if you do! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
893 You want to get busy? Let's get busy. 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
894 “No, I said “pale" birch! 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
895 I am going to count from 1 to 10, and at 10, you will be wide awake and no longer have a dirty mind. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
896 You expect me to give a dam just because you're the branch manager? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
897 Relax! I've got your back. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
898 I always fantasized that I was in hot water . . . 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
899 Your mother was right about one thing. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
900 Your almost done! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
901 You don't always need to be such an eager beaver. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
902 This isn't what I imagined "going deep" meant. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
903 You have a very dirty mind. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
904 You've got to clean up your act Harvey 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
905 And another thing, you better finish that dam if you expect to get out of the doghouse. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
906 It’s Hydroanalysis. I supply the tools, but you still have to commit to the work. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
907 I'm not a shrink, I'm a pucker. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
908 Clean body, clean mind, clean, clean, clean. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
909 Deep breath, and, "cleansing thoughts." 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
910 You don't give a dam do you? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
911 Yes your disorder is indeed unique. I have never had a patient who could only be social while bathing 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
912 In my right hand is a bar of soap, that’s your ego, in my left hand is a brush and that is, well, that is a brush. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
913 The only thing left to wash now is your brain. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
914 We're going to wash that man right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
915 A towel? Unfortunately we are out of time. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
916 That’s never going to fill the hole your father left, you know. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
917 Before psychoanalysis, Sigmund Freud tried the much less successful, scrub-a-dub-dub analysis. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
918 You'll enjoy it more when you get a lefty scrubbing you. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
919 Oct 30 issue. I know it's too late, but: " I told you he was precocious". 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
920 Today I will help you remember what it felt like when rubber ducky said good-bye. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
921 We'll begin by addressing the repressed desires buried underneath those dirty fingernails. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
922 I'm not sure I signed up for this 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
923 It's safe to pass you the soap now that you can't Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
924 These are yours if you show me your hands. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
925 Oh, you were at work? I called the dam, they said you didn't show up today. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
926 Sigmund's "sometimes a cigar is just a cigar" comment depended on whether it was clean or dirty, Sid. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
927 Those are implants, right? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
928 I doubt if this method is covered by your insurance. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
929 "Please be careful getting out of the tub. My insurance doesn't cover Freudian slips". 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
930 So what part don't you get? I said the soap is your neurosis, but the brush is just a brush. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
931 ~A warm bath may help you feel less lonely, but a good scrubbing with soap and brush might do as well.~ 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
932 No - it's not a symbolic cleansing of your super-ego. It's your body odor 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
933 I'm thinking you might have misread the recipe-- "simmer in a warm broth" was meant for the chicken, not you! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
934 Would you like me to wash behind your worries? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
935 You're always bringing your work with you. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
936 Get off my log. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
937 Don’t be so dam eager! That one is mine! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
938 Go ahead. You could use the fiber. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
939 I was hoping you would come clean. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
940 I'm pretty certain this is not what was done to Marat. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
941 I find it derivative and reductive. Yea, let’s hit it with our clubs. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
942 I hope this hydrotherapy helps me get over my always getting the brushoff. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
943 You'll feel better about yourself if you come clean. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
944 I feel that the conversation is finally heating up. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
945 Harvey, please, I'm not going to scrub your back. Now please take the brush back. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
946 Some say it's outdated, but I still believe in Calgon Therapy. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
947 Be careful, getting out, of the Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
948 Tell me more about your brush with death. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
949 Now, Homer .... show me how your Mommie told you to clean your 'winkie'. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
950 And now I cleanse you with your tears. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
951 Is this the type of wet dreams you have been having? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
952 If you expect me to help you, you're really going to have to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
953 Mmm, interesting...tell me about your luffa... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
954 Sorry doc, not remembering the womb... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
955 I will cancel your 2 o'clock and tell them you are submerged at the moment. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
956 It's time to get over your fear of sodium. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
957 It's a new method, but I think you'll find it soaks in far more efficiently than others. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
958 This is not what i meant by brain washing 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
959 First, we cleanse! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
960 Sometimes in life we just have to buy a new Ducky. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
961 There, admit it. Isn't that better. Nothing a little soap and water won't remedy. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
962 And now let's give your soul a good scrubbing. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
963 Other than 'dirty' how did it make you feel? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
964 'When I said you needed to extend an olive branch, that's not what I meant!' 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
965 Since you're in hot water, I'll scratch your back and you scratch mine. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
966 What do YOU think it means? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
967 It's unconventional yes. But all of my degrees on the wall can't be wrong. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
968 And now you will please perform the final part of the exam testing your normalcy. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
969 Sigmund’s Soakology 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
970 It's a new form of therapy I call psycho-spanalysis. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
971 So how long have you had this desire to hear me say "our bath time is up, I think we've made great progress"? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
972 Can we talk about your uncontrollable swearing? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
973 When you asked if I wanted to play doctor, this isn't what I had in mind. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
974 This helps unlock the earliest memories. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
975 If it surfaces, wash it. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
976 This is the most effective treatment for a filthy mind 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
977 You chewed that branch off my family tree! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
978 When this goes out of style it's going to be a bear to clean up. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
979 Now if your desire to harass employees has not abated, I can wash your mouth out with soap so you can come clean about your dalliances. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
980 It's not necessarily a bad thing when your ego tells your id to wash behind the ears. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
981 I wish I could do more for you, but your HMO will only pay for a wash and dry. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
982 And then I'll just wash away your dirty mind. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
983 All limb; no lodge. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
984 well Mr. Johnson, after 5 years of intense therapy, i am happy to tell you a good scrubbing is all you really needed. here you go. and hurry, your time is almost up. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
985 Our time is nearly up. Let all that tension drain-away, and we'll continue next week. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
986 Did your mother ever beat you with a toothbrush? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
987 It's the latest cure for sex addiction. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
988 You'll float, too. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
989 You're being a little mellow-dramatic, don't you think? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
990 All you really need is a good guilt scrub. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
991 Now we strip away your inhibitions. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
992 Don't bristle, it's called immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
993 Now, I just want you to relax... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
994 Your bark is worse than your bite! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
995 You have something between your teeth. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
996 You don't give a damn about the damn dam. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
997 Don’t talk with your mouth full. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
998 With immersion therapy you don’t want to go too deep at the start... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
999 How can you expect to be scrubbed without first scrubbing yourself? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1000 You have a dirty mind. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1001 This is the new normal. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1002 Now let that sink in. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1003 Now will you tell me about your dreams? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1004 Complimentary back scrub? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1005 You think you're taking a bath now? Wait 'til you get my bill. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1006 Sublimation Therapy 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1007 I believe we are making progress. I finally sea anemone. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1008 To be clean is . . . to be clean. That will be two-hundred dollars. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1009 Will the butcher and baker be joining our session today? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1010 I told you not to get those dam implants. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1011 Has anybody ever told you that you have an old soul? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1012 You're awash in guilt. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1013 Think of the soap as the love your father never gave you, and the brush, your mother’s promiscuity. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1014 Back to the womb therapy is working, but what about reinforcing it with this... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1015 Sure you’re busy. Everyone’s busy. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1016 Seriously! My couch feels like a bathtub to you? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1017 I sense resistance in getting at the dirt in the nooks and crannies of your subconscious. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1018 It's the new therapy to cleanse you of indecent impules. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1019 I'm here to help with those"hard to reach" places. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1020 Everyone’s shrinks, get over it! 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
1021 I can see you're trying to stay afloat but my constant chatter makes you feel like I am brushing you off. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1022 Don't forget to floss after you eat that 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1023 Yes, I'm serious. Global warming is a planetary crisis. Think of the polar bears. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1024 It's a special this month to rid yourself of those dirty thoughts. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1025 So, it all starts when your Dad sank all your boats? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1026 And that's what happened to my last patient... 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1027 Now we’ll do it as a round: “Row row your boat...(gently down the golden stream.) 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1028 therapeutic bath 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1029 You're the filthiest client I've ever had. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1030 We need to get to the issues that have been submerged for so long. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1031 Won't solidify for another hour—confess crimes, let me analyze, and see if there's another way. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1032 The Godfather thinks that a cement bath in your own home is more compassionate. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1033 In this exercise we will cleanse your subconscious of bad memories and beliefs. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1034 Now tell me about the wet dreams you have been having. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1035 You're being paranoid again, I assure you I soak all my patients equally. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1036 You said you wanted to clean up your act, didn't you? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1037 Join in! We're gonna wash that man right out of our hair... 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1038 Friendship can be a bit more than a funny handshake. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1039 This is a new therapy for treating germophobia. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1040 Freudian soaks help to understand your subconscious 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1041 At this point doctor I think I’m all washed up. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1042 slow brew 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1043 Don't worry I studied under Dr. Bronner. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1044 I'm tellin' you man if Kevin Spacey is auditioning you, you better use this brush to get to those hard to reach areas." 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1045 It's psychobubble not psychobabble... 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1046 All this ritual because you're afraid to be circumcized? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1047 This is a whole another meaning to SOAP note. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1048 C'mon, Arnie! You know ya' gotta come clean before I let you go home. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1049 We're gonna wash that man right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1050 Just relax Mr. Weinstein, this will help you cleanse those inner feelings. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1051 Soap and water, water and soap....that's all there is. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1052 And sometimes a rubber duck is just a rubber duck. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1053 ...and when I snap my fingers you have a good scrub. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1054 Why don't we stop there and begin with the back next visit? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1055 Welcome to video game therapy. Let's calibrate with some object recognition. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1056 Get in there real deep like, boy. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1057 I think the problem in, wherever you step out of you "bed", you get completely dirty. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1058 No thank you. That last time was not helpful. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1059 Doctor, how does this therapy help my anxiety? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1060 So....did you put in the cumin and the chicken stock? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1061 Would you rather have a rubber ducky ? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1062 Brain washing doesn't have to be a painful experience.... 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1063 So tell me, did your mother like these? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1064 To each according to his ability. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1065 There are only two type of men: those that feel the heat and those that feel the collusion. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1066 Remember: you're a groundhog, not a beaver - we only work one day a year. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1067 Fake news. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1068 It seems like its bark is bigger than your bite. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1069 I warned you gum tree would stick to your dentures. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1070 Put that dam thing back where you found it. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1071 'The beaver who mistook his wife for a branch: and other clinical tales' by Oliver Sacks 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1072 Of two evils, choose the lesser but alas they are birds of a feather flock together. Both they are abuse to one's heart's content each other. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1073 Don't give me that toothache crap. Get back to work! 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1074 I told the boss, sure we can make it 30 feet high, but we aren't going to pay for the dam thing. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1075 Hold it right there! I felled it. It's mine to put where I see fit! 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1076 Is that gluten-free? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1077 Drop it! I just finished paying your orthodontist! 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1078 You’re biting off ore than you can chew! 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1079 Would you like to see our dinner menu? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1080 I'm not looking for active. I'm looking for busy. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1081 Forget about infrastructure - what we need are corporate tax cuts. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1082 Yes, Carol. That stick does make your butt look big. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1083 Repeat after me, "Rub-a-dub-dub Wash my neuroses Off in the tub!" 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1084 Very good. Now scrub-a-dub, and away go troubles down the drain. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1085 Back scrub is free of charge for the first session. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1086 Yes, as a matter of fact, that is pea soup. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1087 I have to clean up your body before I can clean up your mind, 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1088 I think you are in the fetal stage. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1089 We can try to scrub away your troubles. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1090 Obviously you see me as a surrogate for your father who did throw you out with the bath water. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1091 Little does it know that those are its last words. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1092 ‘We’ve gone from birth trauma up to assisted living. Next session we’ll try dementia. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1093 Sit up and I'll scrub your back while you tell me about how your mother emasculated you. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1094 Clean mind...Clean body...Take your pick. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1095 It's your very own "Rub-A-Dub" tubby It's your very own Rub-A-Dub tubby 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1096 Now, when I hand you the soap, I want you to think about the last time you really washed behind those ears. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1097 That's the best dam log I've seen in a while! 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1098 I see you are ready to take the next step in my patented BATHE-rapy. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1099 OK, it comes down to this, loofa or brush? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1100 You know we're building only with reclaimed wood this year, right? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1101 Yes, I have read EVERY book on sexual scandals, too... 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1102 No, perhaps it would be better if you would tell me why you are soaking in a tub. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1103 Now we will replace your need to bath with Beverly Sills with brush and soap. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1104 Apparently, you forgot to scrub between your ears. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1105 Why don't we start where we left off last week -- can you describe for me, again, the crummy filth of your sexual fantasies? 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1106 Patience, Mr. W. This is a particularly severe case of tar and feathers. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1107 Interesting. Let's just let that soak in for a moment. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1108 Did you file an environmental impact statement? 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
1109 Stop thinking about pulling the plug - I've scrubbed the data. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1110 Imagine you are on a horse riding through the frozen tundra. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1111 Have you cleaned behind your ears? 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1112 Keeping a chair by the bathtub is a bad idea because the water and humidity will damage the leather. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1113 I am not a Quack. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1114 Today, we are going to be dealing with total cleansing. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1115 Next week we'll work on getting sober. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1116 I'm sorry, but we can't just "Leave It to... You!" 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1117 Now is the time when you need to step up and do something for yourself. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1118 I have a memory from childhood when my mother used to say I looked like an animal when I was in the bath...a little bare. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1119 For your thoughts, we need actual cleansing. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1120 By time this bar of soap is consumed you will no longer be galeophobic." We will see "Jaws" together next month. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1121 How long have you been thinking that you are a bathtub? 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1122 OK, now slowly hand me the rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1123 I can't help you if you don't want to feel clean. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1124 We often prescribe hydrotherapy for dirty thoughts.... 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1125 You know I'm here to help you, but I don't think you came for the therapy. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
1126 Look, this is the only treatment for Sean Hannity overload. Start scrubbing. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1127 Hmm. You still seem tense. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
1128 I find that my "tub-couch" promotes relaxation and stimulates self disclosure. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
1129 Your mommy made me do this. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
1130 I tell you, this soap and brush are just soap and a brush . . . so you'll come clean with me! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1131 It’s not OCD—you really are dirty. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1132 I think I preferred the couch, Doctor Freud. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1133 No, you're not drowning in debt, but I'll see to it that you do. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1134 Stick to your own damn dam. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1135 Oak? All our other furniture is maple! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1136 mother chucker, you stole my wood! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1137 Stop playing with that dam thing! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1138 I'm going to ask how much he would charge to do me in oil. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1139 That bark is worse than your bite. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
1140 Buck off! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1141 Aspen? You do realize that that will clash with our Cedar theme. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
1142 I'm already reduced to nothing. Please, may I log out? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
1143 We can't be sure if the angst is caused by the underarm odor or vice versa. But let's start with a hot bath and see what happens. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
1144 So, have always tried to be a multi-tasked? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
1145 "Hi Mom!" ... Really?!? 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
1146 Does this make you think of your mother? 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
1147 Times up. We will get to soap and brush next week. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1148 First, on a random dock and now this. I'm going to switch you to Viagra. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1149 It's because you hate your mother. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1150 So glad you were able to get this off your back, Mr. Smith. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1151 Here. Take the soap. Make a clean breast of it. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1152 It's our fourth anniversary, you dolt! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1153 Is this your best dam idea of a birthday gift? 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1154 Relax and allow the chicken soup to soak into your psyche. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1155 How about we use that to dam the river? 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1156 No thanks. I'm still a carnivore. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1157 You know that’s a carb! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1158 You're always bringing your dam work home! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1159 I told you your teeth would get stuck 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1160 So you went out on a limb and got the oak piece knowing it would totally clash with our cherry! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1161 Those things are loaded with insoluble cellulose. You're better off with probiotics. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1162 Those dinosaurs are so smart! All my drawings look like stick figures! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1163 I belong to the school of thought that rejects the loofah. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1164 Tell me more about this sinking feeling that you have. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1165 The soap will cleanse your soul. The brush will revitalize your life. seize the moment. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1166 Doctor, let’s not pull the plug on this idea yet. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1167 Blather. Rinse. Repeat. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1168 Calling that loofah a "falafel' is giving me flashbacks to when I hosted "The Factor." 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1169 J'ai dit froid, pas Freud! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1170 Can I see your neck? 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1171 I know what I am doing. Everyone of my degrees was obtained by washing someone's back. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1172 It’s the newest two in one “come clean” therapy 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1173 At least your conscience is clean. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1174 Scrub away your neuroses? Of course, you realize we only have 5o minutes. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1175 I have a radical approach to spa therapy 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1176 Your mother said she loves you and "Wash your peepee" 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1177 We just thought it would save time to cleanse your pores at the same time as your guilt 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1178 It may seem unorthodox, but trust me, it works. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1179 You might be willing Bucky...but you ain't eager. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1180 I told you to stay away from the comments section. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1181 WATER you upset about now? 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1182 See if you can sink a bit deeper into the feelings that come up. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1183 This is just for cleaning. Wait'll you see my root canal. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1184 Just wash it off. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1185 Unlike the devil, the 'Soap Wizard Co.' doesn't need to be thought of to appear. We are 'God Scent'. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1186 How many times did I tell you not to swing the damn stick? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1187 Is it feeling oceanic yet? 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1188 While we're at it, lets address your foul language. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1189 This should help relieve your Titanic guilt! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
1190 That's not worth a damn... 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1191 No, I don't have a toothpick. Just chew more slowly. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1192 Hey, no inbetween meals saplings! 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1193 Trust me, your superego needs some scrubbing 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1194 I recall last time you felt as a fish out of water. Is this setting any better? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1195 You know frogs will just stay there until they die from the heat. What's your reason? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1196 Not quite what folks envision when the concept of 'clearing the conscience' is discussed... 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1197 Your mother would agree. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1198 This new therapy cleanses you inside and out. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1199 Hi, I'm Kevin Spacey... 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1200 Alright, tell me... exactly when did your aquaphobia start? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1201 You were hard on this old beaver last night. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1202 It’s the newest of the cleansing techniques out there. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1203 It help me to establish trust and rapport. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1204 That’s a tall order! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1205 No rubber ducky...but this bar of soap really floats! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1206 Either way, you can say you saw a shrink. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1207 How long have you felt you were turning into a prune? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1208 Relax. Pretty soon you'll be all set. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1209 If the waters cold, I’m afraid our time is up 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1210 Sometimes a loofah is just a loofah. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1211 Maslow's failed hierarchy of cleanliness 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1212 Don't look down on yourself, ANYTHING can be cleaned. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1213 Good progress! Now if you'll quit kicking, we'll begin tackling your fear of suds. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1214 What are you thinking about being in hot water? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1215 You’ll need a lot of scrubbing to clean up Your character! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1216 And how did that make you peel? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1217 Why do YOU think you’re in there? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1218 Now I'd like to try a little free exfoliation... 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1219 It's a new technique, called a Freudian Dip. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1220 The best way to cure aquaphobia is described is my new book: Heat, Play, Scrub. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1221 Now scrub those thoughts from your mind. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1222 We call this CBT aka Comfy Bathtub Therapy. Care for soap and a brush? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1223 You're barking up the wrong tree, mister. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1224 My practice focuses more on your filthy body, your filthy mind not so much... 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1225 Sorry, but I don't use a rubber ducky due to a patient's possible unconscious ideas of quackery. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1226 Dis your mother scrub you down? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1227 Do you feel dirty now? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1228 Help me help you. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1229 Aw dammit! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1230 There is nothing like a mother's scrub, but let's see what we can do 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1231 Now, I'm scrubbing you to see if you're a good fit for this role. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1232 Let's wash that man right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1233 After a good soak, I'll scrub your inner child. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1234 Have you considered a less conventional career? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1235 Are you ready for your brainwashing session? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1236 Unfortunately, I only shrink when I wash. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1237 There are simply no words for this session. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1238 Measure twice, chew once, idiot. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1239 You’ll have to scrub your own back. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1240 Tell me about your water. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1241 Stay on your side then! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1242 We obviously have much to discuss 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1243 Don't talk crazy, you knew soap and brush would be extra. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1244 It's going to do wonders for your self-esteam! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1245 After today, you'll never even want to look at cheap wine again. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1246 I brush your back, you brush mine. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1247 Time's up! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1248 It's important that you come clean with me. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1249 You soak in here for about 10 minutes,then I'll scrub all the badness out of you 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1250 Soaked! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1251 It's experimental: We thought we'd start on the outside and work inwards. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1252 I have a theory as to why you've been feeling dirty. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1253 For an extra ten bucks I'll let you blow bubbles. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1254 Sometimes a brush is just a brush! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1255 The aroma! The therapy! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1256 It was a fantastic couch, but nobody would come completely clean with me. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1257 Now try to imagine that are soaking wet. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1258 Hurry up - it's my turn now. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1259 OK. Soap up, push, and slide out, then tell me what you can remember about your birth. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1260 vater therapy or vaterboarding, vich is it to be? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1261 Next time you ask for a 'hairy scrubber', be more specific! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1262 sorry, but brush and sponge are not covered by your insurance.... 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1263 Could you just jump out for a second? Carla's ready for me to rub her back now. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1264 Do I also have to wash your mouth out with soap? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1265 It may be a bit unorthodox but I think we've cured your Hydrophobia. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1266 I’m afraid we’re just about out of epsom salt. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1267 Let's not drown our sorrows, let's wash away the blues! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1268 What, no bubbles? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1269 How long have you had this sinking feeling? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1270 Once you are clean we can continue your psychoanalytic therapy. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1271 No, you get the rubber ducky *after* you scrubba dubba. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1272 "We call this immersive therapy. I will be your father. I will rub the soap on the loofah and wash your back. How does that sound?" Dr. Scwartz asked. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1273 I just wanted you to know I can shrink more than your head. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1274 Talk to me about your lather.. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1275 That's taken from my lodge and you know it, dam it! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1276 Regressive? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1277 This was not at all what I had in mind when you said you needed 'a fresh start' ... 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1278 We can talk or we can wash, but we can't do both. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1279 Once you're cleaned up you I'll let you on my brand new couch. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1280 What does 'rub-a-dub-dub' suggest to you? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1281 I'm not going to shrink it, I'm just going to wash it. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1282 This simple purification technique with my patented Catharsis bath beads is proven to be as effective as talk therapy, but scrub hard, Harvey. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1283 You are experiencing an episode of temporary submersion. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1284 I was skeptical at first about your clinic. My friend said it was a wash. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1285 I'm afraid your insurance doesn't cover our aroma therapy sessions. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1286 Ah, but you have to really want to wash away your troubles. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1287 I'm ready to polish you when you are ready. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1288 Now show me exectly how your muzza used ze brush und zoap on you. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1289 But my mom just bathed me! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1290 I'm a shrink. All I scrub is the top of your head. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1291 Okay, as long as you aren't transferring paternal feelings. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1292 Listen, I know you're steamed at this interactive therapy session, but we're trying to prune away your negative behavior. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1293 Fred's therapist was a bit of a germaphobe... 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1294 Now to cleanse the outer self. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1295 To make this work, you'll have to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1296 If I'm a quack, where are the rubber ducks? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1297 Without water, nothing grows. Without soap, we can't wash away our past. Mr. Brushy has been with me since I was four and a half. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1298 Our time is almost up. Can I get you a towel? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1299 Diligent, yes, but acting over-eager is why they mock us. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1300 Lodge members only beyond this point 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1301 Now Sonny remember - too much fiber will dam up your system. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1302 Dam-it, Henry! 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1303 That stick looks awfully familiar, Ted. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1304 No, you're not going to build a man cave. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1305 Gnaw, it's mine. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1306 Dam, you're good! 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1307 It's her shopping list for this week's meals. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1308 Once you wake up I won't be here to assist. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
1309 Just like that. Sweat it, my friend. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1310 For Mensa minds: "No doc, I said I have a fear of Popeye's antagonist, not of washing" 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1311 It's a warm-fuzzy version of hydrotherapy. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1312 It's a soak in every sense of that word. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1313 Sorry,but your tub time is over 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1314 Now then, shall we start with your ablutophobia or your back? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1315 It's not like we just make this stuff up. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1316 Just say the first word that comes to mind. Let's begin - 'rub-a-dub-dub'. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1317 Did you say it all started with your mum bathing you? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1318 We could expand our understanding of your "shrinkage" issue if you would just stop calling me an oxymoron. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1319 Well look at it this way: If the psychotherapy doesn't work, at least you'll walk out of here smelling better. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1320 Why do you think I won’t issue your duck? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1321 What shall we sanitize first, your body or your mind? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1322 Trust me, it's easier to scrub the dirt after you're fully soaked. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1323 Well a hot bath is very therapeutic and I get to charge an extra $175.00, soap and brush not included. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1324 Perhaps you could find some information on periscope. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1325 Your Oedipus complex is as transparent as this bath water. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1326 Our session today will focus on cleansing to release your repressed anger. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1327 Yes, you feel drowned by your mother's guilt, but now you're projecting. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1328 Stop lying. It's time to come clean. So don't be a dope. You gotta use soap. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1329 Let's discuss this dream in our next session. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1330 Now, tell me about how your mother scrubbed you as a child. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1331 One personal scrubber for only $1,182. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1332 Carry a big stick. Would that be like Trump or TR? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1333 Let that soak in for a moment. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1334 I was told my sessions were a little cold. How does the water feel now? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1335 The bath is included in the session, the soap and brush are extra. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1336 I majored in Psychology but I minored in Loofah. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1337 Your insurance plan will cover our psychotherapy session at 80%. Unfortunately, the bath is not recognized as medically indicated by your plan. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1338 Let's clean your mind 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1339 You may want to consider a therapy duck. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1340 Let's start with your fight or flight or scrub response then, shall we? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1341 I assure you Mr. Steinberg these degrees in Backrub are real. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1342 We can always throw out the bathwater. The baby is more complicated. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1343 Ever since the election, these extra services really give me a leg up on my competition. Need more soap John? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1344 And the dominating mommy wouldn't let you be a plumber. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1345 I thought it was the bar of soap I grabbed the first time. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1346 We've only scratched the surface; we have to go deeper. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1347 "Now you won't have to offer to Scrub anyone's Back or ASK anyone to Scrub your Back ever again." Joel realized there was a language barrier when 'the favor' wasn't what he was expecting. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1348 Just wash that girl right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1349 The blank diplomas should have been my first sign of trouble. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1350 Very telling! You chose not to use the bubble bath. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1351 Well, it looks like I'm not the only "shrink" in the room. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1352 You know, you could have just had the couch exterminated. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1353 I think in your case ... mental hygiene will have to wait. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1354 Hop you are not thin skinned. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1355 It's time to come clean. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1356 Do you ever dream that you're back in the womb? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1357 Once I find a reasonably priced plumber, we'll use water, instead of sand. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1358 I'd rather not look outside, I'll just drown all my concerns." "You might need a little help for that. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1359 No matter what I do, I just can't seem to get clean. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
1360 These might give you that sense of purpose you say you're missing. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
1361 So are you ready to wash away your worries? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
1362 You say you feel like you are 'in the soup.' Tell me more about how that feels. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
1363 And now comes the interesting part of this new therapy...head under. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1364 You'll have to do it yourself. I've already been hashtagged. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1365 I've been thinking you might benefit from my men's shampoo group. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1366 If you like how it makes you feel, you can purchase more of this from my receptionist. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1367 This is before I take your checking account to the cleaners. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1368 Chuck you! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1369 It seems to have started with your mother washing behind your ears. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1370 My new soap will make you smell happy. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1371 Although his aquaphobia and insomnia are cured he probably won't want to resume using the couch. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1372 If you like this, IKEA also has a Livi¨ngrøomthêrapist set that might suit you. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1373 I will now scrub away your sins 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1374 Ve bring out ze feminine side . . . 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1375 David Duchovny: Sometimes I think that the dream is reality and life is the simulacrum. Dr. Katz: It certainly is. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1376 ‘Everywhere I go I find that a poet has been there before me … until now!’ 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1377 Mr. Spacey, scrub harder and use soap. That is what I told Mr. Weinstein. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1378 No, really, you’ll feel cleansed. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1379 Enabling USED to be a good thing. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1380 Why must I play Marat Sade? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1381 You'll feel better after a good brushing! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1382 Tell me about your fear of drowning. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1383 Why now obsess over 85 DOLLARS AN HOUR and a LOST HAWAII ? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1384 First, we'll scrub away those nasty memories... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1385 You've got something between your teeth. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1386 How about a good ol’ mind scrubbing for your troubles? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1387 It's part of our new Hollywood director "Clean Thoughts" therapy... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1388 People never believe me when I say "I'm just kidding". 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1389 Do you have a logging permit for that? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1390 Put it back. They said ALL low-income housing is being defunded. That means you, too, Wally. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1391 That is your fantasy. Here is your reality and next session you get the rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1392 Stop playing with your nautilus. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1393 It could use a few more degrees. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1394 When you're ready you can show me on the rubber ducky where he touched you. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1395 We have enough dams. What we need is some decent furniture. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1396 On second thought, I would feel more comfortable with the blinds open. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1397 It's a primal scream, not a primordial one - but since you're there just be sure to scrub off the last of the ooze. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1398 I could be projecting here, but its seems as if you're stewing on something.... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1399 Now repeat...rub a dub one man in the tub, rub a dub now there’s two men in the tub. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1400 Trust me, this natural water birth simulation will help you understand your wife. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1401 Us fruitcakes, we gotta stick together. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1402 Obviously I was misinformed on the duties of a "Back Scratcher" ! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1403 Shall I start or do you want to go first? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1404 How often do you dream you are drawing? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1405 I think we're out of time. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1406 There is nothing either good or bad but a good bath makes it so. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1407 I know you wanted me to face my fears when I said 'I'm drowning in emotions' but this is ridiculous. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1408 Too many degrees. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1409 You can have these, but the bath salts make you crazy. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1410 A new theory of mine. I call it "wash your troubles away". 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1411 So when did you begin having trouble with personal space? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1412 Don't you think acclimating to your fear of climate change is worth a little pruning, Noah? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1413 Time to move on from your exfoliant. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1414 I'm beginning to think your tendency towards compulsive cleanliness might not be completely worked through. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1415 Unfortunately, a clean conscience is the only therapy for your condition. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1416 In this session I'll scrub you of your repressed childhood traumas, and also I'll scrub you. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1417 Immersion therapy only works if you wash behind your ears. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1418 “Rub-a-dub-dub, Three men in a tub, And who do you think they be? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1419 I'm in hot water, aren't I? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1420 Now, show me where the outdoors touched you. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1421 All these years you never washed behind your ears? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1422 Yes, you're a dirty, dirty boy. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1423 "Now soap your eyeglasses and try to recall what you saw in your dream of drowning. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1424 Mr. Chadwick, as a reality check, repeat after me, 'My ego is an illusion, my body needs a scrub.' 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1425 Cleanliness is next to godliness you know... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1426 Therapy can be very cleansing. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1427 Mothra will never find you here...... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1428 You just have to be the only guy who chews off more than he can bite. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1429 Ah, my new treatment...Freud's personal care "fuller brush" since 1906. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1430 Where did you get those implants done?...... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1431 Now I can take the home office deduction. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1432 This is my invention: psychotherapy inspired by waterboarding. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1433 This sure beats laying on that couch!! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1434 A clean body is a happy body. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1435 Remember the last visit, doc? I told you yuor advice would land me in hot water. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1436 You can't handle the tooth!!! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1437 I can understand your disappointment, but since you still don't have scales you might as well give that human skin of yours a good scrub. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1438 I have some issues of my own. Next time shower in advance and we'll sit in the other room. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1439 I'm sorry, Mr. Smith, but for your hydro-therapy to work, you'll have to come clean about your issues. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1440 This is when you cleanse the soul. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1441 Let's go back. Way back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1442 Yes, you can. 5 cent psychiatric opinion is so over. (And no,happiness is not a warm blanket either.) 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1443 Now that he's no longer on FOX, I think it's time to take your therapy to the next level. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1444 Cleanse the body and the mind will follow. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1445 In old country, everybody take bath at therapist. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1446 Any particular sin you'd like to wash away? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1447 Come ON, Nolan. Just let the clam chowder work its magic. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1448 You got custody, I get the house. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1449 Good. Today no rubber duckie. Next week's session perhaps you will detach from these. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1450 Now that you're relaxed, I hope you'll feel free to open up to me. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1451 I told you before,,,,you're all washed up. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1452 If rubber ducky was here, what would you want to say to it? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1453 Perhaps we are here together like this because of the baths your mother gave you as a young boy . 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1454 It was mm mom's saying --"stroke that ego, but soak your id." 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1455 As your psychiatrist, I recommend we throw the baby out with the bathwater. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1456 And when you are soaked by your psychiatrist, how does that make you feel? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1457 Congratulations, you have made a great breakthrough. Unfortunately, you still stink. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1458 Oh, I'm so sorry, it's my next appointment that has a fear of water. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1459 I meant an arm or leg if you don't pay me! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1460 "Don't worry. Now I scrub your back, your way back. It's for healing. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
1461 Promise you'll do my beard afterwards? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1462 We have enough dam trees. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1463 sure it's a studio, but come on right in the heart of chelsea! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1464 Yea, your hydrotherapy comes with a free loofa. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1465 The solution is simple, really. But you have to WANT to bath. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1466 You are both anal retentive and have an oral fixation. These should help with both. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1467 Is there something in particular that made you reminded you of being in hot water? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1468 We scrubbed away all the bad memories. Now lie back and submerge yourself in happy thoughts. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1469 Sometimes, re-enacting early bathtub trauma can lead to significant breakthroughs 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1470 Somnambulism is often preceded by years of poor sleep hygiene. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1471 So, you're dreaming of a warm bath. And then you JUMP out of bed. And then, what? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1472 I'm paying $200 a session to scrub your back? Are you sure you're a real shrink? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1473 Sometimes you need a brush to get to the bottom of depressions. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1474 Let's dive down deep and surface just why it is that you always feel like you're in hot water, Dave. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1475 You have soaked long enough. Time to scrub the rust off or I will pull the plug. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1476 This may be the best way to clean your concious 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1477 Soap. No radio. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1478 Without this polished, denuded Mallomar this dream could not possibly make any sense. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1479 Okay, now this is the difficult part of your therapy. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1480 Can't you pretend that I'm your mother while I wash your back? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1481 You're conflicted about your estranged father? May I suggest a floral scented bath bomb? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1482 Are you ready to begin your therapy session? I hope you are comfortable and at ease. So, what is going on in your life? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1483 No, I won’t marry you. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1484 Think Tom Brady... think Super Bowl. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1485 So tell me again why you think you are all washed up? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1486 Let's cleanse your body as well as your mind. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1487 It's an outside-in approach to cleanse away the past 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1488 New age psychotherapy---first, you clean your body, and then I clean your mind. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1489 “Brainwash, body wash——apples, oranges. One person’s junk, another’s treasure. That’ll be $500 without soap, $750 with, and when I’m done if nothing else, you’ll understand when I tell ‘I cleaned up with you’. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1490 You see? Stewing in it helps. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1491 Is that soap paraben free? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1492 do it before this hardens 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1493 Is this why they call it "shrinkage"? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1494 I'll close my eyes! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1495 I suppose you've heard of the 'frog in a bowl' experiment 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1496 You're still not comfortable talking about it? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1497 I told you to be careful, your in the soup now. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1498 Aquatherapy is still in its infant stages. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1499 You can help yourself by coming clean. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1500 Tell me about your in utero. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1501 We will pull the plug for a re-staging of the birth trauma 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1502 I guarantee that my new therapy will wash away your worries. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1503 Might a rubber ducky help? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1504 Brush it all off. Same time next week? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1505 How do you feel about your mom moving out? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1506 Take it easy, I've got your back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1507 I understand that your dreams make you feel dirty, but im not sure how this helps. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1508 All I did was I booked an appointment at a foot doctor in a trendy neighborhood. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1509 Now wash your tachat. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1510 You can use soap and brush , without remorse of course . 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1511 We will now address your suppressed childhood fear of cleanliness. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1512 On second thought, drain the guilt tub. You should be ashamed of yourself. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1513 Troubled waters. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
1514 Now, let's scrub the spot he touched you. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1515 That's all the time we have... here's some soap to wash off, it's not chlorinated and my clients always depart feeling "relieved" 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1516 you’ll feel better once you’re come clean 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1517 I have to wash your back; it's a key part of regression therapy. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1518 Are you sure you’ve done this before? It’s the first I’ve heard of submersion therapy. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1519 Time's up. Since you're a new patient, I'm only charging you for today's spa fee. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1520 It may not be such a good idea to wash your original sin. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1521 You're gonna wash that girl right outa your hair. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1522 We're at 48 minutes, I suggest you stand up now or youll have to leave covered in pork and beans 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1523 It's our last shot at getting "No Scrubs" out of your head. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
1524 Don't care if you're Jean-Paul Marat or the Marquis de Sade, I , Dr Charles Corday, will cure your shingles permanently!! heh, heh !! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1525 Sorry, Clause # 345b-101c, 2nd paragraph, third line states: "No back wash." 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1526 Not the wiggly bits. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1527 I've changed your fee schedule to charge you by the ounce. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1528 Remember, I've got your back 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1529 I do not want to brush you off , but I would prefer a wet and see attitude... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1530 Let's wash away that dirty little secret. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1531 The hot bed of liberalism has steamed up. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1532 I was mad when I said "Yes" to this house call! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1533 The most important factor in overcoming your depression is your willingness to wash between your toes. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1534 After our last session, I thought we should spend some time scrubbing your subconscious. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1535 We don't want it prefabbed 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1536 So in this nightmare of yours, what do I do next? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1537 Not so. This is your dream not mine. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1538 This is nice...but it’s not exactly what I meant when I said I had free floating anxiety. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1539 Now as the water cools, tell me your innermost thoughts 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1540 Come clean. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1541 No, the name is IGOR. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1542 Time to clean-up your act. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1543 Only by accepting the soap, can you learn to accept yourself. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1544 just breathe very deep. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1545 My old shrink had a walk in tub. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1546 You just want to barely keep your head above water 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1547 Does this hike the hourly rate? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1548 You have to admit it beats being on the hot seat Congressman. Shall we scrub the records? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1549 This type of full immersion therapy lets you scrub away everything that is bothering you. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1550 Rubba dub dub, how about two men in the tub? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1551 You'll never guess where the idea for this therapy came to me. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1552 Now, as you were saying...you needed help, getting things off your back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1553 What brings in you in today Mr. Coleridge?" 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1554 Rub a tub, tub 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1555 I know that you want to be comfortable, but I'm going to have to draw the line at adding bubbles. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1556 After reading the newspaper, this might help. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1557 How are your thoughts now? Any better? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1558 I wrote a book..... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1559 I prefer his early work 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1560 Do you ever get a sinking feeling? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1561 Let me guess. You're too busy to talk about the kids. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1562 You weren't clear about what type of suit. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1563 But my receptionist insists you asked for the mind and body cleanse special. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1564 It's your very own "Rub-A-Dub" tubby. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1565 No bubbles? I don't want to count sheep! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1566 Mr. Manafort, please repeat after me. 'There was no collusion. There was no collusion. The Russians were busy that day'. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1567 Let's wash that man right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1568 Have you ever thought about your carbon footprint? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1569 We are going to wash your mind out with soap. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1570 Don't forget to floss. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1571 Well Paul, I hear you. It IS tough to get your ducks in a row. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1572 Hydrotherapy works for the "Trumpster" why not you? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1573 I’m telling you we can’t continue building in a flood plain and expect to get insurance. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1574 I'd do it myself, but then I'd have to admit that sometimes a cigar is more than just a cigar. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1575 And while you were soaking in the water, what was your mother yelling in the background? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1576 How does that make you feel? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1577 You said you wanted to make a clean breast of it, Mr. Johnson. Now please take the soap. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1578 Rub a dub, dub let's give that ego a scrub. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1579 When life puts you in hot water, bathe, 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1580 Now let's get to the bottom of your vote for Trump. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1581 You'll feel better after you come clean. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1582 How does that make you feel? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1583 Now, the easy way? Or the hard way? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1584 Have you ever had thoughts about a toaster? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1585 I think it's going swimmingly... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1586 Sir, are you ready to talk now? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1587 Give me twenty seconds and I'll tell you how your father caused this one. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1588 Now ya made it too cold! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1589 You are svimming vit the sharks. You are able to do dis. Is vorking, right? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1590 I have soap and a brush. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1591 Do you think you would like to wash your back? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1592 Just scrub with this Freud soap and you’ll feel better by the end of your bath. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1593 Working in the swamp, this cleanse will help. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1594 Exfoliation is next to godliness, Brian. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1595 Shall we finish washing away your guilt? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1596 I suggest more bubbles. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1597 Now this is a couch you can really sink into. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1598 I swear this is normal procedure - now would you like some bubble bath with the scrub? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1599 Bathtub dysphoria syndrome is actually quite common. When did you first feel you were more bathtub than a man? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1600 Do you realize how much CO2 that sapling was capturing annually? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1601 now before we begin, I would like to know if you have had any traumatic experiences involving water in your past. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1602 I strongly believe this will help you get over your brother Jonah. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1603 Well, you said you didn't like the couch was too uncomfortable. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1604 I love when the skin is clean. Just the way I like it. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1605 Did I ever actually say I had a license? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1606 I ordered Birch 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1607 Well, it would appear that "no tears" refers to your hair, not your eyes 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1608 Looks like you've bitten off more than you can chew again. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1609 Sometimes a mud bath is just a mud bath. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1610 Tense every muscle in your body. Now say "relax" as I bring the soap and brush into your field of vision. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1611 Let's get back to your mother pouring ice water on your crotch every morning. . . . 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1612 Let's take a break. Cheeseburger? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1613 Not in my dam neighborhood. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1614 ...because I once mentioned that my patients "literally come clean" and Dr Vey tried to call me on semantics. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1615 It's just that I like my patients to smell nice... 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1616 Frankly, I'm not sure taking a hot bath is going to cleanse your soul from having committed adultery. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1617 The head is covered; shrinking the rest is out-of-pocket. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1618 Why do you feel you're being played for a soaker? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1619 So, describe to me your fetish about being soaped up and scrubbed down in a bathtub…oh sorry, that's my fetish… 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1620 I vant to vash zat man right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1621 I don't care if you drown in there, you piece of shit. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1622 I don't think cockroach is an option. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1623 Yes, this service is out-of-network, but I assure you Todd, self-care is much more effective when done by a clinical physician. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1624 Don’t rub me the wrong way, Doctor! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1625 Shimmy down a little more and we will wash your brain out. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1626 Your flatulant bubbles are an insult to these fragrent bath tools and indicative of your uncontrolled sociopathic smell syndrome. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1627 As you remove yourself from the womb bath I want you to clean the oedipus ring. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1628 Well, we've tried everything else! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1629 You seek the womb 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1630 I'm just following the new evidence-based guidelines. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1631 Need anything else to help you relax? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1632 Yes...therapy did reveal you're trapped in the "Anal Stage." Still, you're on your own. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1633 Is this your first ever scrub-a-dub-dub primal therapy session? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1634 If all is off your chest now, these may help you get things off your back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1635 Yes, I realize that replacing the couch has made a Freudian slip more consequential ... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1636 You still have some things to get off my chest. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1637 I like to tell my new patients to come clean one step at a time. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1638 These awards behind me and because of my sudsy methods. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1639 No doubt you're in hot water, but at least the tub is half full 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1640 Why waste time with a headshrinker; I will shrink all of you, and even throw in a back scrub. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1641 I know we normally do this with an empty chair, but I’m still going to role play as your mother. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1642 It’s about the mind / body connection. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1643 ...and then she told me I smelt bad. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1644 You have to get over your Titanic complex. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1645 You've made a lot of progress this session. Well, you're cleaner. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1646 Rub-a dub-dub a real nut in the tub. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1647 You'll need these, too, if you want to come clean. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1648 How does my AirBnB make you feel [italics]? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1649 Do you love the skin you're in yet? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1650 Tell me more about your little rubber ducky and your mother. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1651 I brainwash old school. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1652 So now imagine you're a lobster and you're getting sleepy....... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1653 Welcome to my spa and dental clinic. Soap up and then we'll brush your teeth. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1654 Would it help to bring that memory into sharper focus if I just slipped in there beside you? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1655 Dewey pondered his need to come clean about his desire for a new therapist. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1656 First, you must feel the need to change and be clean. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1657 Time to Die 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1658 Just loofah that trauma right off. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1659 Hurry up! The three little fishies are waiting to swim over the dam. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1660 We can clean up your life by starting with your back. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1661 Look at that stick, Jerry. Does that stick speak to the look we're going for down at the lodge? What's next, knotty pine? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1662 Let's talk about uranus 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1663 Do you need more relaxation? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1664 Now let's talk about the soap. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1665 Dammed if you do and damned if you don't. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1666 Talk therapy is so 1990...just come clean and watch your anxieties float away! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1667 Rub-a-dub-dub.......you're psychotic! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1668 It's aromatherapy. For me. You smell awful. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1669 Be prepared good sir to have your demons washed away. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1670 A clean body is a great first step to a healthy mind! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1671 You’re a gnawing. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1672 Let's get back to your Dalton Trumbo fixation...while I do your back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1673 This oatmeal submerge therapy will not help your neurosis, but your skin will be soft. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1674 I get some of my best ideas in the hot tub at night. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1675 Maybe if you switched over to a white sauce and less garlic you'd feel better. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1676 It's new treatment WASH YOUR MANIAS DOWN THE DRAIN. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1677 It's now time to scrub clean your conscience. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1678 Maybe a cleanse wasn’t a good idea after all. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1679 I'm afraid your fifty minutes are up. Next week we will do a bubble bath. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1680 Drain the bathtub. I’m drowning. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1681 You have to go pee? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1682 Vhy vould you zink I recommended bass therapy? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1683 Rub-a-dub-dub / my mother gave me no luv 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1684 Trust me, together we will cure you of your foul body language. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1685 A new therapy. It's called Primal Clean. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1686 Now, just relax and make a bubble. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1687 How does lemon verbena soap make you feel? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1688 There's no towel, just the ringer. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1689 Yes, the couch is gone. The sofa? I though you said "loofa." 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1690 I told you they could stand on their hind legs. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1691 If you have a mommy complex, my wife will do the scrubbing. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1692 The little ducky will be part of next week's session. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1693 O.K., water-phobia cured. Now for that chronic B.O. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1694 I'm just trying to help you clean up some misperceptions. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1695 The couch is being reupholstered; besides, Freud swore by tub-o-therapy. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1696 That's none of your dam business. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1697 Grope? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1698 No radio. Soap. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1699 You’re getting warmer Jared ... we’ve almost reached the tipping point now ... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1700 Brainwashing will 'cleanse' your mind of all the bad memories, causing you to speak well of govermental propaganda. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1701 First a soak,then a scrub,your troubles will be gone when we drain the tub!! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1702 While I appreciate the desire to cleanse your innermost self, may I remind you that my fee does not include the cost of a towel. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1703 Trust me, thus is not my first case of germophobia 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1704 This procedure helps you recondite my fees for your treatment. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1705 Brush a little higher, please... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1706 You only make an appointment when you are in hot water! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1707 Let's suppose each of us has our little things ... 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1708 Even as a Freudian I have to admit this is a little much. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1709 Joe.... with some scrubbing it will all become clear. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1710 'Mens clara in corpore claro', I always say. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1711 This will work very well for the regression to the womb, especially if you use the soap, then we can start talking about the hyperhidrosis problem. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1712 Don't worry the couch will be back next week,it's being reupholstered. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1713 Without that brush and soap, doctor, I'll be just like everyone else. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1714 I miss my rubber duckie!~ 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1715 S&M-wise, we now move to Soap & Massage! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1716 We will begin with a clean body. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1717 So you see, your life isn't in the toilet - it is in a tub... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1718 No. You can pull the plug out yourself. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1719 When did they first try to drain you? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1720 This water is like DEBT I'm up to my neck in it 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1721 I think for your condition, Zest is best. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1722 When you say "unconventional therapy", you're really not kidding. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1723 Now, when you feel comfortable, let your mother surface. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1724 They greatly help scrubbing off dark thoughts. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1725 But why would your ducky have an inflated sense of self? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1726 Conscience cleaning and scrubbing is available at an extra charge… 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1727 It's not my job to provide the happy ending. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1728 Cartesian dualism is wrong. The mind and body are one and that's why my new treatment is simple and works so well. First you tub it, then scrub it, and finally drub it. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1729 We have to be cautious, but it looks like Mr. Rubber Ducky has finally lost his hold on you. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1730 Now is your time to come clean. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1731 For a fixation at the amniotic-fluid stage, there is no other cure. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1732 Tell me more about these fantasies. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1733 Trumperary Deprivation? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1734 Can I lend you my services? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1735 Shall I get the stress ducky? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1736 Take that back. I said to bring me a dam tree, not a damn tree. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1737 Third Wave Insurance - $20 co-pay for this and not one cent for Viagra. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1738 Well, now that we've identified your issues, I'm suggesting you clean up your act. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1739 The towel is an additional 50 dollars. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1740 "Mens sana in corpore sano." Let's start with that body. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1741 I thought it might help you to come clean about your affair. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1742 Exfoliate your cares away. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1743 I found traditional waterboarding to be ineffective. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1744 I don't usually make house calls. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1745 Let's try some word-association; 'Rub-a-dub-dub...' 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1746 You see the song was wrong, Psychopaths do take bathes. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1747 Proper hygiene is a prerequisite for the 'Rub-a-Dub-Dub-in-the-Tub Therapy'. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1748 So, between driving for Uber, these home visits, and a some unlicensed baking, I get by. Macaroon? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1749 Now Mr. Trvmp, I vantage you to let all the vitriol and hate to vash off of you. Let it soak avay. Oh vait, you may need this scrubber brush and soap. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1750 You really needed this long time ago! Don’t you think 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1751 Scrub therapy is all the rage. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1752 So what you're saying is, 'You feel like you're drowning...' 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1753 This treatment breakthrough came to me during my hot yoga class 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1754 My mother always said 'Clean body, clean mind!' 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1755 Take these, no more sessions until you decide to come clean 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1756 I'm feeling ripples in my id. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1757 Relaxed? Good. Now it's time to come clean. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1758 For just $39.99, we offer the hot tub bubble bath upgrade.. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1759 It's called the cathartic method. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1760 Now, let's talk about your wet dreams. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1761 Go ahead, Doc. throw in those fancy, therapy bubbles, I've met my deductible! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1762 If this goes well, next time we will try Mental Floss. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1763 That is tubbling. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1764 A rubber duck will cost extra. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1765 Feel free to interrupt me at any time. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1766 relax,your eyes are heavy and your and you will be getting soapy 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1767 And when Mr. Ducky left because you were too high maintenance, how did that make you feel? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1768 You're not worried about shrinkage? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1769 Rub a dub dub, one man in a tub Scrub scrub scrub, clean clean clean pay pay pay my fee fee fee 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1770 Use this brush and loofah as part of the new cleanse, to heal you from years of cold parenting. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1771 Which of these reminds you of your father, and which of your mother? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1772 The brush is for your private parts. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1773 Relax, this is the 'scrub your problems away' therapy method. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1774 Excellent. Now -- could you just make a few inkblots with this soap? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1775 Now that we've finished the mental scrub, we'll begin with the feet. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1776 I don't do ear wax 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1777 Well ... one of the primary indicators of this technique is that your therapist should not be able to tell that you're in the building before you get to his office. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1778 Do you really want me to do your back? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1779 Now before we rub-a-dub-dub, do you see that there are not three men in the tub... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1780 Just relax. You aren't going to shrink. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1781 Lather. Free associate. Rinse. Repeat. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1782 I thought I had explained my holistic approach. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1783 Now confront your feelings about taking a bath in non-digital assets. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
1784 Time to give your backstory a clean slate. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1785 Tell me about your scrubber. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1786 I know it’s just locker room talk but it still makes me uncomfortable. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1787 Okay. Now, scrub all the Super-Ego off your Id. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1788 Hold that thought, while I dictate a S.O.A.P. note. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1789 Relax, the water is eight degrees so I know what I'm doing. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1790 Yes on the soap. No on fresh towels. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1791 "Freudian dip" was a Freudian slip? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1792 Dam the dam lets eat this one. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1793 Mental hygiene is a terrible thing to waste. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1794 Now here comes Mr. Brush and Mr. Soap. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1795 Look down. You forgot to log off again. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1796 This is what I meant by 'soaking you.' My fees are actually quite reasonable. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1797 See if this one floats, doctor. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1798 I practice a unique form of immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1799 But all of these certificates are for back-scrubbing. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1800 It's the latest therapy from Bed, Bath, and Beyond the Pleasure Principle. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1801 So, lets start with when you started to feel this sadness. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1802 I'm a clean freak. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1803 Let me be honest. Barring a watershed moment of self-realization, the years you've spent here are likely going down the drain. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1804 Forgot your towel again...Sir 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1805 So you said something foul to your wife. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1806 Tell me when your mother broke her water. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1807 Now tell me something about when you were a diver. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1808 A clean body is the portal to murky thoughts. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1809 Just let yourself sink into your tubconscious mind 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1810 Symbolicly, you are wallowing in self-pity! You must make a choice to get well! Now, bar or brush? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1811 Wash away the gay. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1812 Of course you can have some soap. But first, tell me long you have hated your father. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1813 You said you wanted to finally come clean with me. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1814 Don't push it; birth sounds are extra. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1815 Okay, Fidel, you can try but you're still gonna be dead. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1816 'Go soak your head is easy for you to say!' 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1817 Sometimes a bath is only a bath. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1818 You're going to have to really scrub. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1819 My little loofah will make wet dream all better. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1820 I want some toys before we start scrubbing. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1821 And I used to just soak you on fees. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1822 Are you sure you don't want some? Clean as a whistle! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1823 Say ahhhh. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1824 Tell me more about your fears of intimacy as I scrub your back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1825 Sorry, my last session came right from work. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1826 Is this really what Freud had in mind? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1827 There are no towels and it is cold in here! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1828 I found the couch a little dry. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1829 Let's see what we can do about those dirty thoughts you've been having. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1830 Start with your feet. We'll work our way up to your head. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1831 I realize it's not Saturday. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1832 Now let that sink in. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1833 Believe me, Charlie. I must free you from the concrete before they will cremate you. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1834 Its a new type of psychological bathbomb therapy. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1835 I told you. Effective full immersion therapy begins with clean underwear. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1836 As your Life Editor, I will now remove your past relationships. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1837 Don't try this at home. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1838 The cure for feeling all washed up is to literally be all washed up. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1839 So I guess you're one of those who liked "The Giving Tree". 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1840 That's enough! I'm going to wash out your filthy mouth. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1841 So what's bubbling up? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1842 Here, now cleanse out those problem areas lurking beneath the surface. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1843 Holistic Psychiatry 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1844 It'll take more than soap and a scrub brush to clean that filthy mind of yours. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1845 The rest of the group therapy patients should be here any minute. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1846 Next session we’ll try therapeutic tooth brushing 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1847 Yep, you're dying. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1848 This is my special Psyche brush I let my only a few patients use. After five minutes use, you'll forget how you voted. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1849 "You won't need these after that cement hardens". 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1850 It all began the day I lost my rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1851 Just go with the flow, Mr. Jones. Immersion therapy can work wonders. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1852 Archimedes, please try to remind! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1853 Have no fear ! While I used to shrink heads for a living, now as a psychiatrist, I haven't shrunk a patient yet. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1854 The good news is that your condition is very treatable as it only manifests immediately before election day. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1855 Ice filled bathtubs, EST, you kids today just don't appreciate how far psychotherapy has come To get the rubber duckie you need a second DSM diagnosis 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1856 This obsession with wetwork is the root of the problem. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1857 So how did your mother do it? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1858 Your dreams are beyond disgusting! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1859 It’s filled with the tears of your disappointed parents. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1860 I'll scrub your back if you'll give me your whine. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1861 And then what would your mother do? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1862 No, not until you release rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1863 It's time to drain. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1864 How does it make you feel that our session is over and you haven’t washed and my appointment book is under water? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1865 If you still can't remember the fall, your amnesia is likely the result of a severe Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1866 If you lie, your mouth is washed out with soap. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1867 How do you think your fear of contamination relates to the Loch Ness Monster dream? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1868 Now that your temporal lobe has been thoroughly cleaned of dirty memories, you will only need to come back once a month for short sponge wash sessions. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1869 But,...if you do wash away ALL of your sins you may no longer be able to see me. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1870 It's a new form of "trust" therapy. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1871 Is this your version of mental hygiene? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1872 I'll wash your back if you'll wash mine. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1873 I thought this would help since last week you got all lathered up! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1874 This soap works like magic. Trust me, I wash dirty minds for a living. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1875 In order for us to get to the source of your problem, Mr. Samuels, you have to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1876 Sorry, my Freudian slip or yours? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1877 It's all the rage in Prague. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1878 No, I can't. You have to wash yourself. But I WILL warn you. It may take a long time, and you have to want to scrub. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1879 Trust me. This therapy will rid you of your inner and outer demons. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1880 For this session , I want you to come clean about what's really bothering you. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1881 You have feelings of abandonment, because you are only one man in a tub. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1882 Theraputic Memories 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1883 -"Doc! Are you sure your New method works?" - "Yeah! I've been inspired by so many great faces. BTW, this method has a name: The Weinstein-Bush-Toback-Hoffman-Spacey-Affleck-Sir Fallon method! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1884 Let's clean up your head! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1885 I'll prescribe you a bar of soap and a hairbrush for your acute hygienic disorder. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1886 Your libido needs some cleaning. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1887 Tell me how his Tweets make you feel 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1888 While it’s all in the mind, these props are proven to wash off your sins 27% faster. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1889 Cleansing your mind was the easy part 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1890 Now, my role here is simply to arm you with the tools you'll need for coping with this feeling. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1891 Those spots you see before your eyes are flakes of dandruff. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1892 Can I scratch your head? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1893 Frogs usually boil. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1894 ...On the other hand, you could come clean right now. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1895 soaking your troubles away 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1896 I have this sinking feeling... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1897 Excellent, your anxiety has abated. Next session we’ll try adding the rubber duck. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1898 you're so tense the water can't flow out of the tub 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1899 So, yes, this will fall under the privacy part of the non-disclosure agreement. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1900 Yes, in this way we will cleanse your mind of its troublesome thoughts. Please do as I suggest. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1901 And I make my own soap on the side. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1902 Okay Mr. Smith, Where would you like to begin today? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1903 We must scrub away those dirty thoughts off in order for these wet dreams of yours to go away. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1904 I really need to invest in bubbles. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1905 I have many degrees but according to goop the path to self-discovery is gentle exfoliation. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1906 So your mother treats you like a child... and took your rubber duckie away. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1907 Now, let’s scrub away all of those dirty thoughts you’ve been having! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1908 My partner doesn't know I've gone back to work. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1909 I agree, multi-tasking is problematic for you. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1910 And now do you feel like a prune? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1911 I called earlier and your wife told me that you were in hot water so I rushed right over. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1912 Not sure this is what I meant by washing troubles away 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1913 No, I won't judge you if you pick the loofah. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1914 Imagine yourself tense. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1915 Sorry. You'll have to do this part yourself. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1916 Is this another one of your dam ideas? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1917 The bath is a bit too hot for me, Mr. Potter 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1918 To adapt to the new landscape, we've recently bought out the main competition. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1919 I recommend an antiperspirant. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1920 Yes, it’s Freudian, but with a twist. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1921 good work; can you let that soak in now? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1922 My role is not to tell you what to do. You have to find out for yourself. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1923 I think you are ready to take it up a notch! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1924 Doctor, there's always going to be a part of me that's sloppy and dirty. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1925 Now don’t pout Mr. Bladderstock; I simply don’t have any rubber duckies. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1926 May I wash the Houston scum off of you, Mr. Kershaw? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1927 Washing your mouth out with soap is not going to bring back your body.... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1928 That was my apple tree! 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1929 And you can take that to the bank. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1930 We should have a safe word. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1931 I'm puzzled...Why do you prefer water-boarding instead of a regular couch? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1932 Washing the pain away 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1933 Please scrub up, Jeremy. For your mother figure? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1934 Now let's scrub away those emotional sore spots! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1935 And how does *that* make you feel? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1936 So, do you REALLY want to clean up your act? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1937 “You may feel you’re in the soup, but I’ve always got your back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1938 You can't just wash it away! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1939 What should I scrub? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1940 '"Lean Forward,' Does not mean you should watch MSNBC." 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1941 I get it. You're vegan. We're all vegan! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1942 Now, let's metaphorically scrub off that tramp stamp and all its associated trauma. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1943 Maybe wet dream therapy isn't such a great idea. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1944 Once you get behind your ears we can tackle all that mommy issue stuff. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1945 All I can say is, 'This better work!' Last time I tried this it took months to grow all my hair back. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1946 This is why you don't find roommates online 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1947 Rub-a-Dub-Dub. Three Men In a Tub. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1948 Read everything but my lips. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1949 If you're in hot water, don't lose soap. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1950 You can't keep calling me whenever you need something pulled out of your ass. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1951 This hydro therapy is doing nothing for my guilty conscience. Let's try the old soap-and-brush method. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1952 Is this plugged in? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1953 I want to be sure we get behind your limbic system 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1954 We are making progress. Now... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1955 Ready for your primal scrub? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1956 Really! Stewing isn't gonna solve anything. Let me wash your back. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1957 Simply close your eyes and think of rub-a-dub dub... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1958 Of course I sympathize. Which dilemma is it this week--sex, money or time? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1959 Immersion Therampy 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1960 And you call this soak-o-therapy? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1961 This is $5000 Dollar Shave Clubs Tub side service!!! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1962 All you need is some peace and quiet. You want me to get your back? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1963 I don't like bubbles. Lost my house to the last one. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1964 Disregard your dirty fantasy...this is the only threesome i would suggest! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1965 Rub-a-dub-tub. Your psyche needs a scrub. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
1966 It's natural that you feel guilty, but a little water clears us of this deed. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1967 Your wife thought the spa-psychoanalysis might help you relax. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1968 And don't be afraid to let things just bubble up. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1969 I am not quite sure bathing in hurricane waterv will prepare you for the next one, but let’s give it a try 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1970 Scrub Ego, drain SuperEgo, and we'll examine Id at next session. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1971 #soporific 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1972 I call this the Freudian Dip. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1973 Yes, I am going to wash your mouth out with soap. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1974 Let me guess...it all began with a rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1975 Just come clean with me. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1976 Your insurance won't cover the soap and exfoliating brush. How does that make you feel? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
1977 I assure you, this is the only cure for 'rubber-ducky' syndrome. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1978 What'll it be, last time I did your back? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1979 This will help you clean your conscience. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
1980 This is my newest principle, clean body, clean mind. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
1981 We can continue to meet like this while you work on our bladder control. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1982 Once you find the soap I have your toothbrush 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1983 The same dream, Doc, and yellow ducky was still here. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1984 Stop dwelling on how it makes you feel. Think about how it will make your skin look to others. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1985 Your getting younger... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1986 What did you expect from hydrotherapy? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1987 It wasn't your aura. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1988 You sure you know what you're doing, Doc? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1989 Be careful of the soap it has a slippery id... 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1990 I suggest we begin by working on your'e irrational fear of Psychiatrists. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1991 ok Harvey. now we are going to learn how to scrub our own back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1992 ...and now for your potty mouth 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
1993 Nothing that a little soap and water can't cure 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1994 Well, the ad clearly stated that bubbles are extra. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1995 Gwyneth swears by this. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1996 Analysis Pacific "I'm gonna wash neurosis outta your head." 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1997 You have a dirty mind, so under you go. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
1998 Are you okay with being named as Patient 6 in my new book? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1999 Hydro is just like psycho, but with lavender water. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2000 I can’t help you if you’re not willing to come clean! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2001 Step one in dealing with your feelings about what you did to get him elected is to try to feel clean on the outside. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2002 This is the neo-Bath theory allegedly stolen from a Jungian shrink. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2003 What do you think it means that your rubber duck sank? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2004 The lice is all in your head. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2005 The epoxy feels just like water before it hardens. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2006 That'll be $5 for the co-pay and $37.50 for the detailing. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2007 I'm gonna wash that man right outta your hair. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2008 A giant toothbrush or a giant aspirin, pick the right one and win a towel. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2009 Think ten... 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2010 Give yourself a few minutes to let it soak in. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2011 Next time let’s try teletherapy. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2012 I call this scrubbing-down-the-psyche therapy. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2013 It was all well and fine for Freud but he didn't have to deal with feature creep. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2014 Hmmm. It seems that scrubbing memories from the brain does have some dampening side effects. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2015 Tell me more about your mother’s rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2016 It's time to come clean Andrew. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2017 Instead of sitting in that chair, could you please get up and adjust neck support. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2018 The cleaner your body, the cleaner your mind... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2019 I'm giving you a sample of Dr. Bronner's soap. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2020 It must be hard working for the President. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2021 Scrub-a-dub-dub two men in a tub? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2022 -It won't take away your problems but you may feel a little bit better about yourself at some point in the session. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2023 It's time for you to come clean. This is what immersion therapy is all about. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2024 Try as we might. We cannot just brush this under the rug, you embezzled Thousands of Dollars from the I.R.S. ...you can make light of it but you really are up to your neck in Hot Water 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2025 Rub-a-Dub-Dub. Where are the other two guys? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2026 It’s almost time for your scrub a dub dub. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2027 As your psychiatrist, it is unethical to reach for the soap. However, I will wash you back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2028 This is no answer for my problem. I think you're just trying to give me a brush-off. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2029 I find this the best way to avoid Freudian slips. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2030 I explained in our initial consult that psoakology is about washing away one's neuroses. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2031 I've combined my practice with Airbnb since your last visit. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2032 You dreamed we were beavers? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2033 I wonder if he'll get the hint.. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2034 Drop it, you dam thief! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2035 Next time you ask your friends if they know a "Hot Therapist, you should be a little more clear! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2036 We're going to franchise. We're looking for a good name. Something better than Clean and Shrink. Got anything? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2037 Let me scrub you “back” to the beginning... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2038 This is the last time I ever make a bet with you. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2039 But if you're just my hallucination, who's the soap for? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2040 Put that dam thing down! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2041 With you it's one dam thing after another. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2042 You do get that the globe is warming, right? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2043 This is not sustainable, Benny! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2044 Your log or your life. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2045 Is it certified non-GMO sourced? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2046 I told you and told you, gluten-free, dammit! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2047 No, I said you don’t give a damn. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2048 Dam it, you're biting off more than you can chew! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2049 I told you opposable thumbs were going to become a "thing." 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2050 Yes, my mother suggested that I use a plastic bag, but paper is more environmentally friendly. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2051 How does he stay up on his hind legs so long? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2052 Shhhh. Don’t bother him, we’ll come back and copy his stuff and sell it. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2053 How am I supposed to write a caption in the absence of a drawing? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2054 Let him draw. When he goes extinct this stuff will be priceless! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2055 Let's address your fear of raising your hand. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2056 It'll be worth more when he's extinct. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2057 It's just one dam thing after another with you... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2058 Even his drawings are going in the wrong direction. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2059 Frankly, I don't give a dam. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2060 And I say unless you can turn that into a drone, we're toast. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2061 Give me back my dam stick! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2062 Why do you look at the speck in your brother's buck tooth... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2063 You think I give a dam? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2064 Not so eager! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2065 If that's not locally sourced, organic material, keep it out of my dam house! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2066 Hey, I chipped my tooth back there; I didn't say dam it! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2067 I said elm, not pine. Can't you do a dam thing right? 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
2068 There you go again, biting off more than you can chew. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2069 I told you, anything but birch. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2070 Don't ask me any more damn questions. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2071 That one's bark IS worse than our bite.... 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2072 Frankly, my dear, I don't give a dam. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2073 I say we club him and take credit for the art. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2074 You're gonna get AIDS 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2075 Is this your idea of a happy family social unit? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2076 I know about cutting down on carbs, but this is getting ridiculous. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2077 Turns out, I'm still not getting enough fiber. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2078 You're going out on a limb by saying that the branch is yours. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2079 How many times, Norman, do you have to be told you can't fit a round peg into a square hole!? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2080 Once she's done with this, well let her work on the other lady with the enigmatic smile 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2081 Let's get to work on your tubconscious mind. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2082 Gnaw faster, dammit! 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2083 and another thing, Chuck, I'm tired of your dam puns! 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2084 Nice toothpick 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2085 That better be organic! 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2086 Do you want fries with that? 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2087 Will no bath wash the guilt from my conscience-or super ego- by the way where's the soap???? 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2088 I can wash your back for an additional $50.00. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2089 The couch won’t work this time, you need a real mental cleanse! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2090 Do you want me to give your negative thoughts the brush off? 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2091 Let's get behind that ego. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2092 Rock 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2093 It is a specialized type of psychotherapy I call spa treatment. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2094 Cuban Sonic massage. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2095 The removal of toe jam always relieves tension. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2096 So, where do you want to start? 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2097 test 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2098 Relax and throw that baby Id out with the bathwater 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2099 And how did that make you peel? 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2100 For the Tom Cheney cartoon: Cave man #1: First, we exterminate him and all of his artsy fartsy friends. Then, we claim intellectual property rights. Cave man #2: Gosh, what is it with you and your obsession about 'going down in history'? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2101 Let's brush away the tartar and go straight to your relationship with your mother...your dental and mental health insurance combined only covers 3 sessions! 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2102 I think we've tapped into something. 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2103 So, do you think we could save them as JPEGS? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2104 I've seen the future and it isn't us. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2105 Who told you he was vegan? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2106 Why does he always make me look fat? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2107 Yes, he might be an illegal, but he's a very good decorator, and only needs some meat to keep him happy. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2108 I say we club him to death, and then tell everyone we did it. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2109 No one in 35,000 years will believe this... 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2110 No, you tell him he didn’t receive the NEA grant. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2111 That's where the wild things are. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2112 It looks like the writing is on the wall. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2113 Let’s stick it to the man! 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
2114 we are offering massages with our pedicures. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
2115 And you look much better too! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
2116 I am joining you in the tub with a scrub. 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2117 Don'e be so aloofa! 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2118 I'm out of Rorschachs. See if you can interpret this drawing. 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2119 Every man must find out for himself in what particular fashion he can be bathed. 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2120 Well Doc...I can't get rid of the feeling that I'm drowning. 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
2121 That's my dam branch! 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2122 A real leader wouldn’t be so biting towards the other branches. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2123 " You need to cut it up, this is piece work.'' 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2124 You're gonna get chewed out for replacing that with plastic. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2125 Put it back in the river, dam it. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2126 Good job, but don't be so eager. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2127 Just leave it to beaver. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2128 I say it's poplar and I say to hell with it. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2129 It's just one dam thing after another with you, isn't it? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2130 We've been through this already, pal. You didn't get approval for that dam add-on. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2131 Did you plant another tree in its place? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2132 Hey, what's the dam idea? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2133 This limb isn't big enough for the both of us! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2134 And if we were woodchucks, I could chuck more wood than you! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2135 Well, you sure are a busy beaver, aren't you? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2136 It'll take another twenty of those for my daughter's paw. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2137 [ just trying to update my contact information ] 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2138 Eagerness does not become you! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2139 You have something stuck between your teeth 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2140 Dam! I'm sick of s'mores. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2141 The Sierra Club is definitely going to hear about this! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2142 Whittle me this, what wood it take for you to share? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2143 No, I said Damn it! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2144 This is you giving a dam?! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2145 You chewed it up! Ah, dam you! God dam you all to hell! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2146 Chew on that for awhile. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2147 Frankly, my dear, I don't build a dam. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
2148 I don't care who heads the EPA. You're not building this dam without an Environmental Impact Report! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2149 I'm sick and tired of telling you, dam it! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2150 You'll have to buy 5 carbon credits to off set that! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2151 I won't speak softly unless you give me the big stick. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2152 How can you collect unemployment when you are obviously working at a branch office! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2153 For the last time, I'M the branch manager! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2154 You know what they say. Location, location, location. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2155 'Get that dam stick out of your mouth!' 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2156 Spit that out or you're sleeping on the dam couch tonight. You know how birch makes you gassy. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2157 I get this gnawing sensation every time I think of trunk. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2158 After I've cooked all day, .....you go and spoil your appetite on a lousy piece of log?!!! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2159 You just reminded me. There's something about you that's been gnawing at me. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2160 I'm not paying for your dam wall. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2161 I said I wanted STEAK for dinner, not stick!!! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2162 Your shoelace is untied. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2163 Don't use your teeth! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2164 Sorry. Are you busy? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2165 We were watching Dumb and Dumber and I told you..."now don't go licking some frozen limb" 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2166 Hands off! That's my dam tree! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2167 That's the same dam thing you gave me for my birthday last year! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2168 You're trespassing on my damn dam. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2169 How many times do I have to tell you not to bite off more than you can chew? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2170 Have you ever heard the expression 'Burning the candle at both ends'? 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2171 This is the last time we let you pick out the Christmas tree. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2172 Leave it to you. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2173 and to think we're breaking up over a toothpick 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2174 Dude. You consume fake wood? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2175 There's a sublime hint of maple, and a mere soupçon of sarsaparilla. Divine. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2176 IF a woodchuck could chuck wood! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2177 Save some toothpicks for the appetizers. You forgot last time. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2178 You call that busy? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2179 That was a misunderstanding; The president is not grabbing us. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2180 Leave it to you. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2181 Okay, dam! I'll leave. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2182 A good builder always measures twice and gnaws once. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2183 Don't you remember what I told you: Measure Twice, Cut Once. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2184 Son, you're dammed if you do, and dammed if you don't. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2185 You know, I'm really getting sick of this whole Paleo Diet thing. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2186 Have you tried flossing? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2187 " TELL ME IF I'M WRONG DO YOU TASTE CHICKEN " ! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2188 Quit sticking your nose where it doesn't belong. Mind your own damn business! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2189 Now you just work on the dam and leave that poor Cleaver family alone! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2190 I told you not to cut down another dam tree! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2191 Did you get an environmental impact statement before felling that tree? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2192 I’m not living in trees and branches anymore! Condo, Carl! I want a condo! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2193 Gnaw. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2194 Are you more interested in the dam or me? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2195 Even with all those diplomas, you’re SURE this is still the best way to make the bad thoughts go away? 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2196 Why, I Otter… 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2197 I don't give a damn where you got that, we're only used recycled materials for this build. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2198 The EPA is on to you. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2199 Do you know how many Weight Watchers points one bite is? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2200 ENTRY FROM MARKLKBETYA@CFL.RR.COM: The software got away from me and it still had my brother's caption, but then it woulodn't let me enter my own. Please ignore my previous entry and please use: I can't believe he's not using a dropcloth. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2201 I’m pretty impressed with your ‘bend-and-snap’ technique. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2202 Next time, drop the stick before you turn and look behind you. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2203 I will build a great, great dam on our southern border, and I will make the Alligators' pay for that dam. Mark my words. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2204 Who's gonna pay for the dam? Mexico? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2205 I said birch not aspen. Take it back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2206 Mr. Robinson before I can proceed to cleansing your mind, I must first cleanse your body. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2207 I am sure that you are not responsible for what happened to your grandfather in Glamis and Cawdor, but we are going to try to wash that guilt off, just the same, Jimmy. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2208 I specialize in waterboarding therapy followed by a good tooth brush up your ass. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2209 You're snacking on too much sugar maple! That's bad for your teeth. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2210 If you ask me, his work is a bit derivative. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2211 What were you saying about small hands? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2212 First, cleanse. Then we'll talk about how it made you feel when mommie hid your rubber duckie. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2213 Right, personal care is nothing to joke about. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2214 We're number one, you know. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2215 Freud worked with the id, ego, and superego but failed to explore the hyper-hygienic structure of the human mind. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2216 Think of it as immersion therapy with benefits. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2217 How else can I help? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2218 So, what brings you to soak-o-therapy? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2219 Now tell me how that feels 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2220 The Epsom salts are not working, let's go for the exfoliation, you appear to be losing consciousness. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2221 This is what we call a full body baptism with a brush and a hamburger. Enjoy!! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2222 I call it, "soaking your psyche." 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2223 It’s my new and improved therapy couch.. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2224 When I said we should revisit your childhood, this isn't exactly what I meant. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2225 And now, for your brain 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2226 You've got a stick stuck. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2227 Well, sir, I think now you need some real brain scrubbing. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2228 A beaver who can’t pull his own weight should get out of the dam service. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2229 You need more fiber in your diet. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2230 No. Not unless this one has a breakfast nook. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2231 Damn you. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2232 Remember, now we need some bricks. We have too many trees. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2233 If you can drag that dam branch over to the creek , I think we are finished. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2234 You got some food stuck between your teeth. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2235 Seriously? You got that for inside the lodge? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2236 No, you're assistant to the branch manager! 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2237 you're not gonna pass the inspection! 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2238 In Limbo, you go under the stick. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2239 No, no - I told you to bring me Trump, not a Trunk. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2240 That better be your dam log! 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2241 I know where we can get some ketchup. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2242 Leave it, beaver. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2243 It all started with a small twig like this. Now we have a flood on the first floor. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2244 Whoever gnaws it down gets first dibs. So, back off! 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2245 Before we start lets get flood insurance 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2246 Dam it. How many times do I have to tell you? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2247 I think you're taking this "Make America Great Again" thing too literally. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2248 It's either frippy Freud or the rubadubdub. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2249 Now add three bags of cement and all your troubles will be over. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2250 Scrub a-dub dub I'm coming in the tub. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2251 I said I could scrub your memories, but this isn't what I had in mind. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2252 It's not that nobody likes you -- we really did run out of bubble bath. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2253 I think immersion therapy is starting to work. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2254 Our time is up. We'll get to your back next time. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2255 Well, suppose you just sit there and think and we'll talk about the first thing that comes up. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2256 Now, imagine yourself sitting in your imaginary family living room in San Juan. ... Are you feeling any empathy yet? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2257 So, now that we've scrubbed away your defenses, what is your earliest memory? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2258 I'm listening. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2259 You'll feel better when you get your sea legs back, Mr. Nemo. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2260 You’ve GOT to come completely clean with me this time! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2261 How does that water make you feel? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2262 My new therapy. I call it "Soap and water for the disorder". 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2263 We’re going to scrub that man right out of your hair! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2264 Don't worry, I'll let you know when to get out, so your fingers won't get pruney. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2265 That’s my wood! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2266 It's not enough to cleanse your mind! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2267 Aquaman was my favorite super hero as a child. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2268 Let's face that demonic smell before we get to the demons, shall we? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2269 Mr Weinstein you must clean up you act! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2270 This is a competitive business. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2271 Warm water and a touch of Calgon, so therapeutic. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2272 Our spa takes a very therapeutic approach to healing. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2273 Do you think your back is clean? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2274 I usually start my patients with a weekly soaking. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2275 Despite me going a little heavy on the lavender this time, you are in a safe place 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2276 Underwater therapy, I was classmates with Dr. Leboyer years ago. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2277 I’m sorry your rubber ducky keeps sinking. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2278 Trust me, you'll feel better once your toesies are clean. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2279 Clean up your act and stop wallowing in your own shit! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2280 Is that sustainably sourced wood certified to FSC® standards? I have to wonder. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2281 Please make yourself comfortable. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2282 I'm here to help you wash away your troubles. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2283 Physical cleansing will prepare you for emotional cleansing. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2284 So next you put the soap on the brush... 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2285 No, this doesn’t qualify as “branching out” your diet. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2286 I know I am your shrink, but your 45 minutes is up. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2287 Can you expand on what’s misleading about “shrink”? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2288 But, four-letter words are so efficient! 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2289 pay your bill , I will wash your back 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2290 Yes, Mr. Svenson, you could have avoided therapy if your wife would do your back. But you're here now, so relax and I'll do that itchy spot. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2291 Are you busy? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2292 You can't control every branch of government, damn it! Ledges later, Larry! 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2293 You were never this busy when we were married. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2294 You said at some point I'll stop feeling self-conscious? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2295 Head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2296 Primal scene trauma is out, original sin scrubbing is in. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2297 Ach..der id must be ver shcrubbed 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2298 Let's re-live that painful encounter, shall we? Read? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2299 Now imagine you're on a boat. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2300 Before I give you the soap and brush, I want you to tell me how you feel about drowning your rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2301 First we'll get the outside squared away---then we'll advance into the head. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2302 Budgeting between therapy and a spa day, this could be seen as a keen compromise. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2303 It's called the Hollywood Method. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2304 Just let the feeling wash over you. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2305 20 years of talk therapy didn't work, so lets try deep scrub therapy. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2306 OK, what's your choice: body or brain? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2307 A nun has hope in her soul. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2308 simmer for twenty minutes, skim hair and drink the concentrate. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2309 Row, row, row, emote. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2310 What happened to all of those little boats you wanted washed? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2311 Not your germophobia, MY germophobia 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2312 Just lean forward and tell me how does this make you feel? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2313 This is new therapy. We're going to wash your troubles away. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2314 It's called a "diet". You log in everything you eat. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2315 Of course this is the way I started. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2316 Caught you building a lodge for that other woman! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2317 Don't you know that no beaver likes dead wood? 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2318 Derivative. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2319 Son! Measure twice, cut once! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2320 Leave room for dessert. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2321 What ever happened to our open concept ? 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2322 No means no! Fuck you! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2323 Leave it to Cleaver, Beaver!! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2324 Sassafras? Nice try, eager beaver. I smell a muskrat! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2325 Should I tell my nephew to bring his chain saw. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2326 I'll speak softly if you let me carry the big stick." 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2327 For crying out loud, Joe, stop obsessing about the feng shui and just get the lumber to the worksite! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2328 I said I wanna see your shtik. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2329 Don't even thing you're bringing that dam thing into our home! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2330 The beginning: You've got something stuck between your teeth. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2331 The dentist said grab by the limb, not the trunk! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2332 When I said we were going to scrub you down to your essentials, I should have mentioned it was meant literally. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2333 Relax. I'm sure we'll find your rubber duckie. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2334 Soaking will help, but in my experience you'll need these to completely scrub off your mother-in-law's disapproval. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2335 As the water drains, close your eyes and look for the light at the end of the tunnel 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2336 Visualizing my new pool helps put up with your incessant whining. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2337 ...or you could just wash, wash, wash all your troubles away. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2338 I call it... Plagarism! 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2339 I only try psychosomatic scalding with my most hot-headed patients. Simmer down, Timothy. Simmer down. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2340 Relax, immersion therapy is perfect for facing your aquaphobia! 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2341 Tell me about that trauma you had in the bath. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2342 My friend, we're going to clean in places your mother dared to go. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2343 Show me how your mother loofah'd. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2344 You're blocking. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2345 I don't resolve your childhood issues, I replace them with new ones. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2346 I’m afraid you’re mistaken, Monsieur Marat, I perform “head shrinking” not “brain washing” 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2347 Here, "Scrub your own damned back!" 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2348 Let me role play as your mother 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2349 I've course I'm brainwashing you. Would you prefer a headshrinker? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2350 I must state very clearly that this "Wash thoroughly therapy" does NOT satisfy my Freudian need for human contact. Sexual, or otherwise. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2351 I told you at our first meeting I was a Freudian and maternal. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2352 Lets break out of it. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2353 I can also cook a marvellous bouillabaisse, sing like Patsy line and they say that my carpentry work is sublime... 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2354 Bath therapy works on most of my patients. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2355 As soon as you start owning up to your own BO, we'll go back to the couch. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2356 It all started in a cast iron tub in Peoria, Doc. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2357 This time I'll brush you off instead. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2358 I can get your back, but, youll have to scrub that man out of your hair and send him on his way yourself. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2359 I find it is easier to recall repressed thoughts of your childhood this way. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2360 This is going to be easier if you open up. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2361 To paraphrase Freud, "Time spent with a bath is never wasted!" 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2362 Now we call it retro washing. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2363 Yes, one might say that multitasking can be a form of OCD. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2364 No, I don't have a hair dryer... Why don't we turn the conversation away from grooming, and back towards your issues with depression? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2365 So why is that you think that only your mother can scrub your back? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2366 Wait, where are my clothes? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2367 Sir, I heard that this 'toad' method of soaking is quite painless. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2368 I know, but the couch cost twice as much. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2369 Use this to make fort what is da. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2370 As you can plainly see, there never was a ducky. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2371 Well, you have to admit, coping and soaping sound pretty similar. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2372 Tell me more about your mother. A clean start might have meant a variety of other things. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2373 When I said I would have your back, you clearly misunderstood. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2374 You're going to have to pay extra. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2375 My fee does not include the time it takes to fill the bathtub, but it does come with a back scrub. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2376 I call it washing away your sorrows. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
2377 Now that I know you can chuck wood, How much could you chuck? 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2378 I said bring me a TREAT! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2379 Dammit, Clyde, you left your browser open to that beaver page again. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2380 I said NO MORE BIRCH! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2381 Don't forget to floss and brush when you're finished. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2382 Your home improvement campaign is making the rest of us look bad. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2383 My trees are not building YOUR wall! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2384 Wrong tree! Look first, then gnaw! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2385 You can’t fool me with that poplar, I can smell the lilac! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2386 Take the house but I get the dam pool. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2387 I know, Louis! Even A Branch Wants To Be Something. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2388 Must you insist on speaking softly? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2389 Water you doing out so early? We build the dam wall at night! 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2390 Our house is already underwater and you want an addition? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2391 Damn it! I wanted that stick! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2392 I had a gnawing suspicion that you were behind all of this... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2393 That's not your wood Chuck. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2394 No, Measure twice, chew once. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2395 Fine! Go and build your dam! But I am telling you right now, I’m not paying for a new retainer!! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2396 Leave some knot for me. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2397 You can't log in here without a password. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
2398 Stop eating the Birch, its bad your teeth 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2399 I knew it! Put it back. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2400 You've always been a show-off, Justin Beaver 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2401 Do not gnaw on my side of the river, Terry. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2402 You know the dam rules....only oak trees, no maple. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2403 It's just one dam thing after another with you, isn't it? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2404 The habitat is that way! Your benightedness incenses me well-nigh abasing myself with trite scatalogics! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2405 You broke it again? It's about time you realize retainers don't grow on trees. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2406 We don't need your dam help. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2407 The creek is back that way. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2408 Olive Branch? That doesn't excuse you chasing around in the Lily Pond. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2409 Ernie... don't try to convince us that you're still Vegan- I accidentally saw you gnawing on a live two-year old Poplar Thursday night while we were watching "Riverdale" and "Dynasty"- 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2410 I wanted birch, not maple! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2411 Since when have you been a vegan. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2412 You're going to keep building that wall and you are going to scavenge for it. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2413 You said you were going green. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2414 Enough with the snacks; dam it. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2415 You're eating us out of house and home! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2416 Go find your own dam branch! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2417 We're beavers, not woodchucks! Beavers beav, Warren, we beav! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2418 No, not the hard woods. You'll get the humans mad at us again. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2419 You can drop that. They've projected this'll be ocean by 2020. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2420 He doesn't create. He duplicates. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2421 Bacon, dammit, BACON! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2422 Lips that touch linden shall never touch mine. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2423 I knew you'd bite off more than you could chew. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2424 Look around, you do realize you are in the desert. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2425 That tree isn't worth a dam. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2426 I told you 10 times, I want a one room place, 3 feet by 3 feet so bringing the entire tree makes no sense. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2427 There’s nothing like a project you can really sink your teeth into 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2428 You know, I've always wondered how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2429 Is it home grown organic? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2430 If you think that's going over the mantle, guess again. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2431 “You know you should be eating berries not wood” ‘The time before beavers ate wood’ 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2432 Hey, that looks like Russian Larch to me, you've been colluding with that hussy Putin again haven't you! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2433 I asked you to use your paw - it will leave a teeth-stain. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2434 Don't be so eager! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2435 Damn it Jim! Just kidding, funny huh? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2436 Excuse me. Move-ins are only on the weekend. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2437 Did you check the expiration date? 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2438 I don't care if you're walking softly or not. Drop the dam stick! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2439 Dam it, damn it! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2440 I'm done with the big stick policy. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2441 Like they say, 'Leave it to the Beaver" 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2442 Didn’t I just say we’re going with brick? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2443 I don’t want ‘the solution’—I need you to LISTEN. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2444 We build dams here! Hemp is a gateway tree! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2445 I said I needed a shorter piece for the kitchen counter, you never listen to me!! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2446 Repent--before you're dammed! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2447 You just picked this up from the street? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2448 You know there are environmental implications to what you're doing! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2449 Its fake news. Don't believe it. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2450 Make dam sure the bark is better than the bite. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2451 As his boss yelled at him Chuck thought, "Damned if I do, damned if I don't." 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2452 That's the Executive Branch—I wanted the Judicial Branch. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2453 Is that locally-sourced organic? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2454 I told you no more dam improvement projects! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2455 More than that. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2456 Chuck! Really? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2457 No sugar maple till you've finished your birch! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2458 I thought we said no eating between meals. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2459 Is it me, or are we contributing to excessive erosion due to deforestation. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2460 I'm getting a sinking feeling that you are oceans away. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2461 Today, we're building a fuc. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2462 I'll be damned if you're going to bring that back to the house! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2463 So when did it first wash over you to clean up your act. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2464 The only shame in bathing is the shame of not doing it well. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2465 Can you let me know when the Carrots & Potatoes are tender? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
2466 I don't think this is going to wash away my sins. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2467 I believe you may have OCD. Maybe. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2468 at first I didn't even know what Twitter was. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2469 I would, but our time is up. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2470 Just relax, you will attain 'nirvana' at the end. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2471 test 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2472 Do you have a permit to build in a wetland? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2473 ‘This salt bath may help you release some of those toxic emotions.’ 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2474 Harvey, I thought you only insisted on bathing during during meetings with hot actresses. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2475 You! You're on the Canadian nickel! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2476 Yes, yes, the water makes everything look smaller. The real question here is the luffa or the scrub brush! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2477 I'm sorry, but there's no way to maintain a clean couch for patients without a few bath-time rules. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2478 All right. Which one does the rubber duckie want first? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2479 Thant's good! Now tell me if this mother figure scratched anywhere other than your back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2480 A bar is a more typical venue for drowning your sorrows. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2481 I don't know why you have waves in your tub- try some soap. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2482 Great water therapy. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2483 I know the issues you had with your mother. I won't scrub your back. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2484 This is a new therapy for writer's block. Want to try it? 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2485 yor being there will minimize the mess 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2486 Softsoap and bristle. Softsoap and bristle. Trust me, it works on everyone eventually. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2487 While I'm checking for OCD, don't splash water on my new shoes. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2488 Yes, psychoanalysis is out (again) and hydrotherapy is back in! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2489 Mom's chicken soup'l fix you right-up ! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2490 Epson salts with your burger? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2491 They say, Split peas are a whole lot better for your skin than goat's milk, Leonard. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2492 I want you to use the soap like it's your childhood, and the brush like it's how you wanted your childhood to be. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2493 Clean thoughts, Mr. Simpson. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2494 Although this state-of-the-art mud bath may not cure you, it will ensure silky skin in your coffin. Not covered by medicare, but worth it! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2495 ... now you must learn to walk softly. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2496 Our first session prepares you for my fees. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2497 Spa therapy actually goes back to Roman times. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2498 Mr. Mueller it’s time to wash that man right outta your hair. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2499 Hydrotherapy again this week? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2500 Where's my froggy? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2501 If you awake feeling like a prune we will know this treatment is working. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2502 It's your mind that's the issue. Get your head under. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2503 How much can you chuck? A lot of people have been asking. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2504 It starts with a clean confession 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2505 Have you considered deodorant? 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2506 No...I won't be your valentine! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2507 Sorry, but playing 'Find the Rubber Ducky' would compromise my reputation as a licensed hydrotherapist. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2508 'I said that I feel hopeless.' 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2509 Sorry, my last session ran a little over. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2510 Also, the couch was infested with lice. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2511 I thought you were cutting down. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2512 Don't bother, I'm done! It's dammed if you do; dammed if you don't! 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2513 Now, Mr. Weinstein, I want you to think back to your earliest memory of these occurrences. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2514 One more log, Junior, and your off to the dentist! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2515 I Don't really think saying "Calgon take me away" over and over is helping your situation.. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2516 There's too much busy work in this dam outfit! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2517 Hey, I told you to stay away from that family tree! You just started another turf war! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2518 Rub-a-dub-dub. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2519 You better have a permit to cut down that log. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2520 Aquaman's ill-fated attempt to seek therapy. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2521 Your character armor could use a good scrub. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2522 Throw your anxiety out with the bathwater. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2523 I am going to help you come clean with all the details of your past 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2524 Sometimes a bath is just a bath 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2525 What part of “Dam it all” do you not understand? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2526 [self-hygiene therapy session] "Now imagine your floating with your arms up and feeling the sensation of clean armpits." 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2527 Sometimes your rubber duckie is just your rubber duckie. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2528 Analysis California-style, with scented soap. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2529 Dam it, I expect better form my branch Manager. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2530 You can't use that, you know I'm allergic to aspen! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2531 The doctor said no trunk food! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2532 You the feller they call Saturday Night Beaver? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2533 Dam it, I expect better form my branch Manager. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2534 That's our new dental floss. What do you think of it? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2535 Shall we start with your back? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2536 Just submerge yourself... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2537 Are you sure gum tree doesn't cause cavities? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2538 'Sorry I don't have any ships for you to command.' 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2539 "WAIT ONE MINUTE BUDDY! Now put that carrot back and stay out of my Garden! 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2540 How do you feel now about the Platinum Health Care option? 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2541 We're ready to start the session...Where is the Butcher and the Candlestick maker? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2542 Forget the dam. We just won a contract to do a prototype for the wall. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2543 Now close your eyes while I Freudian Slip into something more comfortable 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2544 Your HMO doesn't cover towels. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2545 It's poplar, Jack. It's bad for your cholesterol. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2546 That's the wrong size. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2547 How many times do I have to tell you? Beavers don't play Fetch! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2548 Are you SURE it's organic? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2549 You know, that looks exactly like one of the sticks from the dam I just built 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2550 I think you have some of it stuck in your teeth. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2551 Watch it buster, or you'll become gloves. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2552 Those must be his victims. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2553 You'll have to get all the permits first. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2554 Hold it right there! This is a stick stick-up! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2555 Hey buster, that’s my tooth pick! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2556 No coverage if you break a tooth on that hardwood. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2557 Would you plesae follow the vet's diet advice? She saidto take two aspen and call her in the morning. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2558 Chew faster, Dame it! 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2559 I told you, we are NOT remodeling the kitchen! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2560 Chew faster, Dame it! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2561 You know that's human property. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2562 The wall won't build itself! How else will we keep out the woodchucks from the other side of the boarder? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2563 Hard working? Beavering away? Five kids and me stuck in the lodge and that's it for an eight hour shift? You're nothing but a hat waiting to happen. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2564 Sonny. You're chewing like you don't give a dam. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2565 I said no snacking, you're going to spoil your appetite! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2566 Yeah.?. Let me tell you where else you can put it. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2567 I prefer to invest in timber futures and leverage the whole forest. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2568 Is that sustainable? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2569 Are you Loonie? We can't build a wall here, we're Canadian! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2570 Got floss? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2571 That’s a very incisor observation. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2572 Pardon me, is that the Trump stick? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2573 Too bad you can't chuck it. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2574 Bring home the bacon, I said. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2575 You call that a balanced meal? 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2576 You said you wouldn't, but then you wood. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2577 Do I have to tell you again, we're BEAVERS, not woodchucks! 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2578 Quit using my floss! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2579 I don't give a damn either!!! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2580 How many times have I told you not to bite off more than I can chew? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2581 Let him be, George. He's finally stsying within the lines... 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2582 The limbo for beavers 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2583 You build, I’ll criticize. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2584 Must you pick your teeth in front of me? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2585 Harold, I'll be dammed if I let you bring one more stick into our house. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2586 Whoa need that for a 1950's raft rebuilding. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2587 If Bucky wants to borrow it, tell him you don't give a dam. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2588 Finish your dinner. There are millions of starving beavers in Eurasia. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2589 You're better than this, Chuck. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2590 You are starting to NAW me! 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2591 You're a dam thief, you know that Carl? 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
2592 That came from my Dame. You home wrecker. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2593 I thought we agreed I'd order the maple and you'd order the oak. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
2594 Measure twice, cut once! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2595 The 'dam it' joke wasn't funny the first five times, either! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2596 Welcome to the Flat-Tail Society. Is that the next arm for the International Space Station? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2597 Well if it isn't the new regional branch manager. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2598 Oh, gnaw you don't. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2599 Well, YOU won't be giving any orders with that dam stick in your mouth. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2600 Wait a dam minute. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2601 Are you going to eat that? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2602 Is that Kobe wood worth the extra price? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2603 Eddy, we're out of toothpaste again. Stop eating it right out of the tube! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2604 Are we having tree again tonight. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2605 You should start using recycled materials instead of living trees - this is the 21st century you know! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2606 Every dam thing contributes to deforestation. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2607 No, no you're doing it all wrong! You pick your teeth with the stick. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2608 Over there, Damn it! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2609 I know my own teethmarks. Get your own dam wood. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2610 We beavers will be in trouble if Trump dumps Canada out of NAFTA 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2611 Can you add a patio this time? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2612 In February, you go back to your main job of weather forecasting. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2613 I'd like to speak to the branch manager. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2614 Dammit, stop trees passing on my pond. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2615 I knew it! Your an ignorant limb supporter! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2616 Dam straight! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2617 You call that busy? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2618 If you don't have a subscription to the New Yorker, you'll never get chosen as a finalist. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2619 If that's the executive branch, bite twice as hard. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2620 You just don't give a dam 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2621 But the agreement is that i'm suppose to get the house! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2622 leftovers again? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2623 How many times do I have to tell you: Lift from the knees! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2624 Oh please, you don't think you have an oral fixation? Clearly, you are on the shores of deNile. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2625 Put it back, that one is on the endangered list. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2626 You gnaw you way, I'll gnaw mine! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2627 Gnaw. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2628 Would've should've could'chuck! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2629 It's just a branch, dammit! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2630 . . . and remember, it has to be owner-occupied. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2631 Just so you know, stranger, stick-thievin's a hangin' offense in these here parts. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2632 You should really be using a knife and fork, you'll ruin your teeth that way. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2633 One stick a day tells me you don't give a dam. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2634 You're always biting off more than you can chew! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2635 You don’t lift another log until I see your mission statement. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2636 I think you'd better log off and come to dinner, young man! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2637 For the last time, "Fetch" is a dog's game. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2638 That was MY wood to chuck, as a woodchuck that could chuck wood! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2639 I'm warning you, my bite is worse than your bark! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2640 I’ll be damned. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2641 Idiot! I told you to spiralize it! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2642 Have you considered the environmental implications of what you about to do? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2643 You call that "busy," do you? 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2644 Housing Authority! Need to see your carpenter's license. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2645 You need to look more eager. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2646 I said naw, not gnaw 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2647 I'm sorry but before I can help you I need to know if that is organic, non-GMO, and has no traces of gluten, dairy, soy, or peanuts. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2648 I told you, no birch trees. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2649 Where the heck have you been? And you better have a dam good excuse! 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2650 If you don't have a union card, you ain't building this dam 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2651 That's my dam shtick! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2652 I told them our infrastructure plan could pay for their tax breaks. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2653 Behold two beavers about to throw down over a nice, long, juicy, stick. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2654 One day into Whole 30 and you’re cheating already? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2655 Smell the oakey flavor with a hint of squirrel essence. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2656 DON'T "WHADDEVER" ME, you half-buck-toothed little rodent....I'm askin' you: Did anyone hear it fall or not? And don't claim it wasn't in the woods.... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2657 You know you're gonna have to pay for the dam too, right? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2658 How dare you say I don't give a dam! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2659 I heard you were from Gnawlins. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2660 This does not make you, looking at other beavers, OK! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2661 You're a lumberjack, not a tree trimmer. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2662 get out you're treepassing! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2663 I've told you time and again, don't bite off more than you can chew. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2664 We agreed on Victorian Revival, yet you keep bringing shaggy chic. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2665 I chop 'em down, YOU build the damn? What, we union now? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2666 Don't bite off more than you can chew. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2667 Dam it all. That's the last stick of gum isn't it, Harold. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2668 C'mon now, don't be such an eager beaver. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2669 You know Earl, with all this beavering away we've been doing sometimes I wish I was born a sloth. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2670 Do you really think I'm impressed by your little 12 inch twig? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2671 Arthur's! Arthur! Maple is so last year. I can't invite friends to a den made of that! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2672 I told you the neighbors are coming over. That won’t be enough. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2673 I said "bacon" 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2674 I'll tell you where you can chuck that wood. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2675 Do I see lipstick on those gnaw marks? 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2676 Is that Paleo? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2677 Stop bring your work home! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2678 I said dam, not road block. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2679 Hurry up, dam it! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2680 The bark is worse at first bite. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2681 That dam thing is too damn big! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2682 I'm a beaver, dammit! How should I know how much wood a woodchuck chucks…? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2683 Are you kidding me! Your jumbled big house is wasteful of resources and THAT is NOT from sustainable growth. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2684 We don't cotton to no tree rustlers around here. Now git! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2685 You knew we didn’t need that branch. You did it on purpose. I have had it up to here with the triplets, it’s your turn now! 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2686 Snetop playing with that dam branch and get to work! 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2687 Damn it Fred, this time build the dam then the lodge. We're beavers and there are rules. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
2688 Hey Buddy, stick to your own stick and leave mine alone! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2689 Snetop playing with that dam branch and get to work! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2690 No, really, it’s just a bathtub. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2691 I already told you, we're not paying for that dam wall! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2692 When I was your age I brought home branches twice that size, swimming up stream, both ways. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2693 Damn it, just Leave it...Eddie... 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2694 Its about time you did some dam work around here! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2695 You better not be thinking of building that wall again, Donnie. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2696 Spare a twig? No? God bless you. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2697 There's a good boy! Now roll over and play dead. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2698 I already told you we aren't adding open beam ceilings! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2699 You shouldn't be doing this. Remember we don't have dental coverage in our insurance plan anymore. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2700 Beats me, but, he’s popular with the ladies. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2701 How come nobody ever asks 'How much wood could a beaver chuck?' 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2702 That looks suspiciously like a drawing of one I harvested last week. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2703 We'll build a dam, and the otters will pay for it! 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2704 We voted to strike, Cedric, so if you're gonna scab, we're gonna have a problem, see? 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0
2705 Frankly, I don't give a dam. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2706 Splash-Cam video will prove that I downed that tree. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
2707 You think you are so smart having buck teeth don't you Bucky. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
2708 I’m not chewing any @&%#ing Merlot!!! 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2709 That's mine! I recognize it anywhere! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2710 I knew from the cut of your gib that you live in the sticks! 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2711 I really love your incisors. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2712 Justin, you're biting off more than you can chew again. 1.0000 0.08704 12 12 0 0
2713 He said Mexicans are building the wall, not Canadians. 1.0000 0.07412 14 14 0 0
2714 Now, Chucky, take that right to the nursery - I'm pregers ya know. 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
2715 Wait till you try the other branch, it has a deeper, woodier taste. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
2716 You must have a great dental plan. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2717 Let's do it. It will be worth more if he's dead. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
2718 Your insurance should cover it under immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2719 Gonna wash that man right out of your hair? 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2720 Do you ever miss our old role-playing, when we just pretended to be strangers meeting in a bar? 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2721 After a good scrub, the childhood neglect will wash away and we can begin working on your PTSD. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2722 " No need for angst. I'm going to 'put you under' is merely a figure of speech used in hypnosis". 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2723 Sir, I said you should accept that you’re in “denial” not “The Nile”. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2724 The hot wax and simonizing therapy is extra. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2725 Two tub therapy is reserved for my erectile dysfunction clients. You're just filthy. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2726 The real issue often lies below the surface. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2727 I may be Freudian, but you can still wash that yourself. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2728 The first step is WANTING to scrub your own back. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2729 Where's the itch? 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
2730 Let's start at the womb. 1.0000 0.01379 73 73 0 0
2731 Freud's Bathtub. 1.0000 0.01379 73 73 0 0
2732 Is the self-pity too hot? 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
2733 No, it's not OK 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
2734 Full Service Alternative Therapy 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
2735 The brain must be scrubbed before it can be washed. 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2736 Just a bit more behind the ears and you can say goodbye to those feelings of guilt. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2737 Time to come clean. 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2738 I just want to see if that thing you said about dropping the soap was a Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2739 For your therapy to be most effective, we need to get below the surface. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2740 A high-fiber diet is highly overrated. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
2741 Well, now you've gotten yourself into hot water. 1.0000 0.01600 63 63 0 0
2742 I think we’re about to get to some hard to reach places. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
2743 Dread not, admiral, sometimes a bar of soap is just a bar of soap. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
2744 You made a wise choice. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy wouldn't get you quite as clean. 1.0000 0.01439 70 70 0 0
2745 Let me help you clean your freudian ship! 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
2746 Yes, it still hurts that your duckie is with another patient, but it's time to move on. 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2747 So you are always in hot water with your mother and now you're always in hot water with your wife. I'm seeing a pattern here 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2748 You feel like you’re underwater? Let’s unpack that. 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2749 I think pretending that I'm making a home visit has really made a difference in your progress, don't you? 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2750 It's called milk of amnesia therapy. 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2751 Your mother called; don't forget to do your back. 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2752 If you want bubbles, may I suggest an earlier appointment? 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2753 So, where do we begin? 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2754 Just throw the damn toaster in, already. 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2755 Full service aromatherapy 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2756 Time to scrub those demons out 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2757 Now let's give that subconscious a good scrub. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2758 Now do you feel comfortable enough to come clean about what is bothering you? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
2759 I'll pay YOU $100, if you keep coming up with dreams like that! 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2760 Hold these. I'll join you in a minute. 1.0000 0.01439 70 70 0 0
2761 I told you..leave your logs outside and wipe your beaver.. 1.0000 0.01439 70 70 0 0
2762 With just 10% more destruction, you could be a real contender to replace that platypus appointed to protect this place. 1.0000 0.01439 70 70 0 0
2763 And we'll have next week's session at the barber shop. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2764 Tabula washa? 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2765 Doc, fact is that I am in a lot of hot water. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
2766 How does it make you feel when I say rub a dub dub three men in a tub? 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
2767 I have the solution for all of your problems; just add toaster. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
2768 Does it feel like water or concrete? 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
2769 Mind you don't Freudian slip getting out. 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
2770 Let's start by cleaning your body, it's easier than your neurotic behavior. 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
2771 These won't remove your guilt, but they'll help you smell better. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
2772 The soap and the brush are complementary. 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
2773 I told you that you would be in hot water if you did'nt brush and floss. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2774 And that's why you chose a Kohler Bath? 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2775 Next week I’d like to try the shower. 1.0000 0.01379 73 73 0 0
2776 With the budget conscious therapy option, you simply wash your troubles away. 1.0000 0.01379 73 73 0 0
2777 Now submerge your head and your fear of water will be all gone. 1.0000 0.01439 70 70 0 0
2778 The blinds are open a crack for a reason. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2779 I thought this might help trigger your childhood memories. 1.0000 0.01439 70 70 0 0
2780 Just slide under and we can scrub your subconscious. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
2781 Next week I will bring you a towel. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2782 This will help get it off your chest. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2783 I can't help you unless you come clean with me. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2784 But you really have to WANT to be exfoliated. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2785 No- medicaid doesn't cover this. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2786 And you miss your ducky? 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2787 Welcome Mr. Jones, I'll be your mental hygienist today 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2788 But how does the loofa make you FEEL? 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2789 We'll try washing out some your inhibitions. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
2790 Mr Brush is a licensed hydrotherapist. You can tell him anything. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
2791 Maybe some simple hygiene can save your marriage. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
2792 Trust me, your anxieties will bubble up to the surface in no time. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
2793 Freud had a dirty mind, but I like to keep it clean. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2794 Think of it as a Freudian splish splash. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2795 I'm sure this will cure all of your boundary issues. 1.0000 0.01600 63 63 0 0
2796 I understand that as a child you only took showers, but work with me here. 1.0000 0.01399 72 72 0 0
2797 I know it's a bit unconventional, but I had to throw out the couch after the dog peed on it. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
2798 The dream where you're having a bath in your analyst's office, how does it make you feel? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
2799 I think I'm beginning to see the issue here. Next, show me how you scrub your back. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2800 You have to want to get out of the tub. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2801 Now... try to reach out for the soap without screaming "Eureka!" 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
2802 My theory is that some demons are water soluble. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2803 Why do I think you're anally fixated? I haven't seen Mr Rubber Duckie for the last 25 minutes 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
2804 After this the cardiologist will see you for a pedicure 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
2805 Doc, the real trouble is I feel like I can barely keep my head above water. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
2806 Mr. Manafort although I find it a bit unorthodox to provide a therapy session while you are soaking in a portable Russian bath, I strongly recommend you make good use of all this hot water and come clean. Oh, here's some Valdai clay soap 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
2807 Next comes the agitation cycle. 1.0000 0.01439 70 70 0 0
2808 If a tree falls in the forest, try chewing with your mouth closed! 1.0000 0.01482 68 68 0 0
2809 It's like regular immersion therapy, but with towels. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2810 The difference is your mother didn’t have a degree in psychoanalysis. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2811 I wash your back... you pay me $200 an hour. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2812 OK. The bath water isn't drawn very well. Let's move on. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2813 Just let that sink in. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2814 Are you ready to come clean? 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
2815 Talk filth like that about your mother and this is the treatment you'll get. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2816 Most of my patient do not believe in washing away their sins, unfortunately. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2817 The butcher and baker are going to be late for our group therapy , would you like to start without them ? 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2818 The meditation this week is, "Rub-a-dub-dub, leave your blues in the tub." 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2819 Are we relaxed yet? 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2820 Well, It's your session. Are you going to talk or just sit there and stew? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
2821 I want you to feel extremely comfortable when you are in my office. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2822 Now. Which of these do you dream about most? 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2823 Canadian lumber? 1.0000 0.01600 63 63 0 0
2824 It has nothing to do with color, it’s his “Blue Period” due to his imminent extinction. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2825 Go ahead, I've got your back. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2826 So? How do you like my version of hyrdrotherapy? 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2827 I want you to make a clean breast of it. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2828 Soakanalysis 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2829 Morrie Rose had to admit that, while it wasn't what he'd paid for, he did feel slightly better. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2830 Sorry, the couch is in the shop for repair. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2831 In due time we'll cleanse those Sigmund Freud delusions. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2832 As Freud liked to say, hogging the armrest is a slippery slope 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2833 What do you think makes you feel that life is strange? 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2834 I have many other patients, Mr. Hotchkiss. You should be flattered to be in my recurring dream. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2835 In one hour you vill vake up feeling very violated..and surprisingly clean 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2836 You just never know with the bed bugs in this city. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2837 Yes the water's hot. That's why I'm called a shrink. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2838 Come und zay along with me -- "Rub a dub dub, psycho in das tub." 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2839 You said you wanted to come clean about your feelings towards your mother. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2840 But you requested full immersion therapy! 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
2841 Yes, this isn't traditional Psychiatry. Our motto, clean back, clear thinking. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2842 Hot Water!! Learn to Deal with It. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2843 So is this helping with your aqua phobia at all? 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2844 Next session, just TRY and leave the tub home. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2845 It's the best way to come clean about your past. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2846 And you call me a shrink? 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
2847 Now let's go back to the beginning...you're in the primordial soup. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
2848 When your fingers are wrinkly, our session is up. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
2849 And were you enjoying my sponge bath in your dream? 1.0000 0.01504 67 67 0 0
2850 When you're ready. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2851 Just relax. I've got your back. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
2852 So this is bathos and the toothbrush is hyperbole - is it still all Greek? 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2853 Now, tell me again why you feel like you're in hot water. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2854 Avant-garde therapy puts you in touch with the essential, pre-birth YOU. 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
2855 I've found it the quickest way to resolve trust issues. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2856 But it's not as habit forming as Xanax. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
2857 Tell me more about your plumber. 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
2858 My challenge to NewYorker.com: I'll pay for a subscription if you allow online comments from readers in reply to Borowitz & your other columns. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
2859 Let's just give brainwashing a chance. 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
2860 Okay Mr. Figby, now that you have conquered your fear of bathing, might I interest you in some soap and and a brush - please?! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
2861 And of course, mind scrubbing is an integral part of immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
2862 this will help us to explore your feelings while you were in your mother's womb 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
2863 Take these and our first step to help you meet girls will commence. 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
2864 When did you first realize you had an unhealthy attachment to your rubber duckie? 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
2865 Here. Make a clean breast of it all. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2866 Can you feel the cleansing of your soul yet? 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2867 To me, "Rub-a-dub-dub" is not the answer, Doctor! 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2868 ...so what you are saying is that you didn't know that 'CBT' stands for 'Cold Bath Tub'...is that right? 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2869 You will not make progress until I am allowed to scratch beneath the surface. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2870 mermanic depression is more common than most merfolk realize. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
2871 Ok, let's get through this today without another periscope incident. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2872 Drown your sorrows... 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2873 And exactly what did that rubber ducky mean to you? 1.0000 0.01379 73 73 0 0
2874 So, Mr. Emerson, how do you feel about Immersion Therapy? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
2875 Look, you are not out of the woods yet! 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2876 First we tackle the B.O., THEN we move on to Aroma Therapy! 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2877 If you are going to stew in your own beer, you may as well exfoliate. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2878 I think we can rule out the "thrown out with the bathwater" syndrome. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2879 I tell you Fred, Trump will save our hides only if we vote for him. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2880 This damn is on your back. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
2881 This has nothing to do with your mother. You really do need to scrub behind your ears. 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
2882 Now gently scrub your id. 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
2883 Next week, we shrink your mind. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
2884 I'm going to scrub the problems right out of your head! 1.0000 0.01379 73 73 0 0
2885 We’ve scrubbed your psyche. Now it’s time to work on that b.o. 1.0000 0.01379 73 73 0 0
2886 Perhaps it's time to embrace the idea that you're all washed up. 1.0000 0.01258 80 80 0 0
2887 The only way I can help you is for you to come clean. 1.0000 0.01183 85 85 0 0
2888 Now we wash your mouth out with soap! 1.0000 0.01143 88 88 0 0
2889 Frankly, my dear, I don't give a dam. 1.0000 0.01143 88 88 0 0
2890 Please, tell me more about this hot water you're in. 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
2891 Yes, it's possible some of your issues could return in a more normal setting. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
2892 Try not to get the pillow wet, Mr. Jenkins. 1.0000 0.01105 91 91 0 0
2893 Just let your neurosis float to the top. 1.0000 0.01325 76 76 0 0
2894 Now, young man, unless you stop making bubbles, Mummy will just have to open the window and pull the plug. 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
2895 I'm just here to help you blow off steam, and maybe scrub out that troubled brain of yours. 1.0000 0.01070 94 94 0 0
2896 My new therapy. I call it "wash all your cares away." 1.0000 0.01130 89 89 0 0
2897 This way, I can treat both the rash and the guilt at the same time 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
2898 The mini-mikvah is easy. Be happy they didn't require the mini-briss. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
2899 You seem to have been in a stew for a while now... 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
2900 I'm pretty sure that immersion therapy generally doesn't require bath salts, a loofah, and Turkish towels, but you're the Doctor.... 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
2901 I’ve got your back. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
2902 My Medicare patients don't get this treatment. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
2903 Did your mother scrub your back before or after she massacred the rose garden? 1.0000 0.01058 95 95 0 0
2904 Just pretend I’m a toilet. 1.0000 0.01117 90 90 0 0
2905 You see, sometimes a soap and brush is just a soap and brush. 1.0000 0.01117 90 90 0 0
2906 Are you still upset about being shrinkproof? 1.0000 0.01117 90 90 0 0
2907 It's not brainwashing, it's headshrinking. 1.0000 0.01156 87 87 0 0
2908 So, you still have that sinking feeling. 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
2909 It's either the pet skunk or the girlfriend. You can't have both. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
2910 I guess I'm just not not feeling as hot as I used to be. 1.0000 0.01212 83 83 0 0
2911 The drain will auto-open when your time is up. 1.0000 0.01212 83 83 0 0
2912 I need to probe some sensitive areas. 1.0000 0.01081 93 93 0 0
2913 What makes you think I want to wash your back? 1.0000 0.01242 81 81 0 0
2914 Self administered treatment, I only provide the tools 1.0000 0.01170 86 86 0 0
2915 Might I suggest, that we finally get to those 'hard-to-get-to' places. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
2916 Look at it as Freud fast-tracked - clean body, clean mind. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
2917 No judgement; it's normal. It's why I'm called a shrink. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
2918 Nope not therapeutic. Sometimes a bath is just a bath 1.0000 0.01361 74 74 0 0
2919 So, to clarify, you're saying that my washing your back makes you feel...uncomfortable? 1.0000 0.01198 84 84 0 0
2920 ...and let all of those Trump tweets wash away. 1.0000 0.01130 89 89 0 0
2921 Before we can discuss your P.T.S.D., we need to deal with your O.D.O.R. 1.0000 0.01130 89 89 0 0
2922 ...and what would you want to say to Rubber Ducky if he were still here? 1.0000 0.01504 67 67 0 0
2923 You wanna wash my mouth out with soap - you must be nuts! 1.0000 0.01399 72 72 0 0
2924 I've got to come clean- Rubber Ducky's gone, and he's not coming back. 1.0000 0.01156 87 87 0 0
2925 And how does this make you feel? 1.0000 0.01156 87 87 0 0
2926 And how do those erectile dysfunction ads make you feel? 1.0000 0.01117 90 90 0 0
2927 I'm in hot water 1.0000 0.01117 90 90 0 0
2928 I find these spachiatry sessions to be very cleansing experiences for my patients. 1.0000 0.01117 90 90 0 0
2929 Don't forget to wash between the ears. 1.0000 0.01070 94 94 0 0
2930 'What are you doing, Bob? Just building a wall to keep the otters out! 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
2931 I'm going to wash that pain right out of your hair 1.0000 0.01242 81 81 0 0
2932 You're not going to go all "Kevin Spacey" on me, right? 1.0000 0.01036 97 97 0 0
2933 We've given up on brain-washing. 1.0000 0.01036 97 97 0 0
2934 The theory is we wash your troubles away, symbolically speaking. 1.0000 0.01036 97 97 0 0
2935 Scrub a dub dub...Ego, Id and Superego in a tub. 1.0000 0.01036 97 97 0 0
2936 Scrub Therapy cleans all the psychic grime and lingering traces of trauma. Plus it leaves you smelling minty fresh. 1.0000 0.01036 97 97 0 0
2937 I said we need a schtick, not a stick. 1.0000 0.01036 97 97 0 0
2938 And at your next session we'll discuss the trauma caused by this session. 1.0000 0.01093 92 92 0 0
2939 What kind of 'spa therapy' were you expecting? 1.0000 0.01005 100 100 0 0
2940 Yes, I got my degree in Vienna, but I did my residency in Baden Baden. 1.0000 0.01274 79 79 0 0
2941 Now is the time to get rid of those dirty little secrets. 1.0000 0.00995 101 101 0 0
2942 Which of these makes you feel more vulnerable? 1.0000 0.00995 101 101 0 0
2943 It's called a psychobabble bath. 1.0000 0.01399 72 72 0 0
2944 This fear of loofah ends today. 1.0000 0.01143 88 88 0 0
2945 Listen, Donald, you can't just grab them by the bush and walk off with a woody. 1.0000 0.01015 99 99 0 0
2946 Only when your body is clean can we begin work on your dirty mind. 1.0000 0.01070 94 94 0 0
2947 I'm here to help you wash away your stress 1.0000 0.01070 94 94 0 0
2948 Some of my patients find this more relaxing than the couch. 1.0000 0.01070 94 94 0 0
2949 Its called “Primal Cream” therapy. 1.0000 0.01070 94 94 0 0
2950 Tell me more about your brush with soap. 1.0000 0.01117 90 90 0 0
2951 It's immersion therapy. What did you expect? 1.0000 0.01117 90 90 0 0
2952 Since you are unable to recall memories of being in utero, you might as well make good use of your time... 1.0000 0.01117 90 90 0 0
2953 Now say any bad word that comes to your mind. 1.0000 0.01183 85 85 0 0
2954 If you don't come clean with me, I can't help you. 1.0000 0.01183 85 85 0 0
2955 Shrink session in progress. 1.0000 0.01026 98 98 0 0
2956 This is the best I can do for only $55 per session. 1.0000 0.01258 80 80 0 0
2957 Your wife engaged me to clean up your act! 1.0000 0.01081 93 93 0 0
2958 And now for the brainwashing. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
2959 No offense, but as your therapist, I don't think I'll join you...but thanks for asking. 1.0000 0.01081 93 93 0 0
2960 The rubber ducky flew south. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
2961 How long have you had these floating anxiety dreams? 1.0000 0.01081 93 93 0 0
2962 I must confess that I had something entirely different in mind when in our last session you mentioned your wet dreams. 1.0000 0.01143 88 88 0 0
2963 I'm afraid if you go back any further in your birth story, Irwin, we may have to shoot you out of a cannon. 1.0000 0.01143 88 88 0 0
2964 It's perfectly normal to feel that others are cleaner and more ready for bedtime than you. 1.0000 0.01439 70 70 0 0
2965 Let's go with your gut and see what bubbles up. 1.0000 0.01212 83 83 0 0
2966 Of course you’re dreaming, and yes, I still charge by the hour. 1.0000 0.01047 96 96 0 0
2967 Now stand up and scrub your obstacles. 1.0000 0.01379 73 73 0 0
2968 I understand that you're uncomfortable, and this is a great place to explore why 1.0000 0.01081 93 93 0 0
2969 Now i'm going to wash out your dirty mind with soap! 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
2970 No sweat. It's neither a neurosis nor a psychosis. It's hidrosis. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
2971 Yes, I did write 'The Interpretation of Steams' 1.0000 0.01258 80 80 0 0
2972 Sorry, I can't help you...you're in too much hot water. 1.0000 0.01361 74 74 0 0
2973 You weren't supposed to be nude. 1.0000 0.01399 72 72 0 0
2974 Clearly, your mother never let you scrub between your ears. 1.0000 0.01274 79 79 0 0
2975 Next week you should try out my group therapy session. 1.0000 0.01274 79 79 0 0
2976 Are we at 9 months yet? 1.0000 0.01307 77 77 0 0
2977 I can't help you if you don't come clean with me. 1.0000 0.01439 70 70 0 0
2978 You're not relaxing. 1.0000 0.01307 77 77 0 0
2979 It's you who must to want to exfoliate. 1.0000 0.01307 77 77 0 0
2980 I am an only child. My mother was a hygienist and my father a psychiatrist. 1.0000 0.01307 77 77 0 0
2981 Is Ivory okay? 1.0000 0.01307 77 77 0 0
2982 So glad you decided to finally clean up your life, but some day you’ll need to ween yourself from your tub! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
2983 Your thoughts are 99.44% impure. 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
2984 No, I said: "Show me your shtick." 1.0000 0.01307 77 77 0 0
2985 I think you're finally ready for this Savon de Marseilles 1.0000 0.01227 82 82 0 0
2986 We find immersion therapy to be a successful cure for ablutophobia. 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
2987 Don't forget to scrub your subconscious. 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
2988 Which of these beat represents your feelings about your mother? 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
2989 I feel your pain. I've tried to read Joyce's Ulysses, too. 1.0000 0.01361 74 74 0 0
2990 We take Sewer-cide attempts very seriously. 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
2991 You feel dirty, don't you? How can Mommy help? 1.0000 0.01361 74 74 0 0
2992 Your insurance doesn't cover duckies. 1.0000 0.01361 74 74 0 0
2993 And when I count to three, you are going to ask me for a towel. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
2994 When the Id comes to the surface, you may clean it with these..." 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
2995 This should help you come clean about your real feeling towards your mother. 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
2996 The soap is your mother. 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
2997 I'm ready for the cucumber slices. 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
2998 I can't help you if you don't come clean with me. 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
2999 I think we should start with the death of your rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
3000 So you feel like you're always being watched? 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
3001 We have ways to make you talk 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
3002 Just soak it all in, and then brush it off. 1.0000 0.01418 71 71 0 0
3003 We're gonna wash that man right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
3004 I know the dentist told you to floss more, but this is ridiculous. 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
3005 Technically, there's no rubber ducky so I can't be a quack. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
3006 Leave it, beaver. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
3007 Your insurance covers the extra accessories 1.0000 0.01325 76 76 0 0
3008 Now then. Let's see if we can wash that neuroses right out of your head. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
3009 There was a mix up on my order for a new couch. 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3010 We hope this will help cleanse your psyche. 1.0000 0.01361 74 74 0 0
3011 Let’s end today’s session here, before you get pruney. 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
3012 Let's try this again. This time don't stand up. 1.0000 0.01258 80 80 0 0
3013 Some of the perks of Gestalt. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
3014 I call it "Submersion therapy." 1.0000 0.01274 79 79 0 0
3015 You seem especially bubbly today. 1.0000 0.01274 79 79 0 0
3016 Can't you just get your one of your multiple-personalities to wash your back? 1.0000 0.01274 79 79 0 0
3017 I agree. You're really in hot water. 1.0000 0.01274 79 79 0 0
3018 This is to wash away your past. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
3019 We're going to try something new today... 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3020 I know you made a few mistakes, but that doesn’t mean you’ll be in hot water. 1.0000 0.01198 84 84 0 0
3021 Don’t worry, Mueller. We’ll get to the bottom of this. 1.0000 0.01198 84 84 0 0
3022 Next week, we'll confront your other childhood fear: Aunt Louise's green bean casserole. 1.0000 0.01307 77 77 0 0
3023 Wishy washy psychiatry. 1.0000 0.01227 82 82 0 0
3024 From the archives of the DSM, the early days of mental hygiene. 1.0000 0.01227 82 82 0 0
3025 I am sorry your insurance will cover tub therapy but no bubble bath. 1.0000 0.01227 82 82 0 0
3026 How long have you been afraid of electrical appliances? 1.0000 0.01439 70 70 0 0
3027 The water is only a metaphor. 1.0000 0.01156 87 87 0 0
3028 I'm afraid I'm all out of ducks. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
3029 Let’s start at the beginning. Tell me about your first spa experience. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
3030 It was a Natural Birth, get over it! 1.0000 0.01258 80 80 0 0
3031 I beleave you have mother issues. Now get behind your ears. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
3032 Crazy no more as I scrub off the bat shit. 1.0000 0.01170 86 86 0 0
3033 Now since we've made such nice progress I thought I'd give you some new material for your next therapist. 1.0000 0.01170 86 86 0 0
3034 I know this must seem peculiar, we must keep this experiment quiet. You scrub my back and I'll scrub yours. 1.0000 0.01242 81 81 0 0
3035 My methods may seem orthodox. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
3036 Well, this isn't your typical wet dream. 1.0000 0.01093 92 92 0 0
3037 Such a dirty mind. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
3038 Because she told me to clean up my act. 1.0000 0.01183 85 85 0 0
3039 Now we can get in touch with your inner child. 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
3040 When did you start to feel you are "all washed up"? 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
3041 What happened next in your dream? 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
3042 squeaky clean 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
3043 Are you sure buoyant therapy works? 1.0000 0.01183 85 85 0 0
3044 Thats right. Keep thinking clean thoughts. 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
3045 Sorry but we have to stop. The brush will have to wait until next week. 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
3046 No, I don't have a rubber duck. Why do you ask? 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
3047 A dream rate? You are dreaming. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
3048 New couch so scrub good. 1.0000 0.01212 83 83 0 0
3049 I'm afraid you have to scrub yourself. The soap and brush are included in the fee. But you have to do the work. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
3050 Ah.. oh..there's a $35 co-pay for the mud. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
3051 And yesterday she was showing Bob how to build this thing called a wheel 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
3052 Tell me more about your dirty dreams. 1.0000 0.01242 81 81 0 0
3053 It's not water - it's tears. 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
3054 But it said hydrotherapy on my website. 1.0000 0.01342 75 75 0 0
3055 I call it Psychoanalysoak 1.0000 0.01600 63 63 0 0
3056 It's a lot to soak in, but my methods are spotless. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
3057 Relax, psychotherapy can be a very cleansing experience. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3058 Would you like me to clean your mind or your ass? 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3059 Now let's see if we can clean between your ears. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3060 This doesn't work unless the patient comes clean. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3061 No, brainwashing is very different. 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
3062 Oh, this isn't part of the therapy. I just like to give people baths. 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
3063 So you want to crawl back into the womb? 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
3064 Now tell me, what's worse -the problems you've just told me or the fact I didn't change that water in 6 months? 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
3065 This is getting a little boring, next time you need to take a bath by yourself. 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
3066 Now imagine how your loofah feels. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3067 Mind you, this is just until the new couch comes in! 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3068 This is a self cleaning session! 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3069 You left these behind yesterday. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3070 Your conditioner time is up. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3071 Now...close your eyes...become the noodle. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3072 Scrub hard and those nightmares will be washed away for good. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3073 Tell me, have you been having any dirty thoughts? 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3074 I think I should just scratch yours 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3075 This is where we wean you away from little yellow duckies. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3076 I have found that we make progress one degree at a time. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3077 Look, do you want a part in this movie or not? 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3078 When I said to start taking warm baths, I never meant to take them in my office. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3079 Bad news is that your insurer doesn't cover out-of-network mental health. The good news, is that the $150 cash price includes a free bath. Bad news is that the soap is $75. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
3080 Your hour is up. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
3081 Mens sana in corpore sano! 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3082 Let's go back to your throwing the baby out with the bath water dream. 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
3083 So Dootor are you comfortable ? 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3084 Now tell me about the time you were in hot water. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3085 Yes, you are a dirty, dirty, boy. Now scrub. And tell me why you hate your mother. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3086 I hope this does not rub you the wrong way... 1.0000 0.01835 55 55 0 0
3087 A mother’s loofah is hard to replace. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
3088 Put that dam thing back where you found it. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
3089 You are the most persuasive neurotic I have ever encountered. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
3090 Let me show you the scrubbing technique I learned from a Hollywood actor. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
3091 Next I will apply this Freudian soap to brush away thoughts of mother. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
3092 Make sure to wash behind your id 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3093 Always remember, I've got your back. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3094 Give it a try. It's 99% pure. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3095 Side effects may include some shrinkage. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3096 Bare with me; you'll feel better if you come clean. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3097 What did you expect? I'm in network. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3098 Soap or brush? It's always your choice, whatever you think about me. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3099 Make sure you clean behind your id. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3100 I can't tell you how to bath properly, I can only help you discover how to bath property. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3101 Please visualize the hot water you are in as a bath and your therapist as a back scratcher. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3102 Relax-sometimes a bath is just a bath. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3103 Oh, you thought this was therapy for *you*! 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3104 Now we shall wash your troubles away. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3105 Where do you think those dirty thoughts came from? 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3106 Actually, my undergraduate degree was in marine biology. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3107 So you were telling me how your mother threw out the bath water ... 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3108 You cheater! Those are Lois' teeth marks. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3109 I don't give a damn how much wood you can chuck. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3110 You were right .. no question .. cultural appropriation. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3111 Let my suggestion soak in. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3112 When did you first suspect that you might wind up in hot water?? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3113 I feel there is a lot simmering beneath the surface that we aren't really touching. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3114 Please explain why you don't believe you're on a couch? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3115 We can try, but i think you're going to need more a lot more than soap 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3116 It's my new total immersion method designed to develop trust in your therapist. Trust me yet? 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3117 Come on, you've come this far. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3118 No need to feel guilty about changing political parties. Just a quick scrub is all that's needed. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3119 In this American debacle the only known treatments are exile or vigorous scrubbing. Not covered by insurance but group soaks popular. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
3120 According to Ancestry.com i’m 23% Eurasian beaver! 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3121 Dam this, dam that, dam everything...Bucky this obstructionist legacy will surely lower our poll numbers below Congress. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3122 It's too late now. You're no George Washington ! 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3123 The warm water relaxes your body and mind in order to open your inner Id. The bath salts for scrubbing...well...I just like the smell of those. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3124 Relax. Let me the you back, way back, to your earliest childhood. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3125 You talk about your OCD as if it was a bad thing, Harold 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3126 So you feel that you're in hot water? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
3127 Now, Reverend Mister Wesley, when I count to three you will awaken fully rested with a sense of peace, tranquility, and godliness. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3128 Hafeez told me to tell you you have something between your teeth. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3129 Yes, the whole body, why do you ask? 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
3130 Your wife gave your plumber my address. Shall we begin? 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
3131 Relax! I've got your back. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
3132 Will you have issues if I rub you the wrong way? 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
3133 When you awaken, you will feel cleansed. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
3134 This will be just the statement piece we were looking for. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
3135 This is not the first time you have been in hot water. Before we go into deep analysis can you move forward a bit? 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
3136 Trust me, my specialty is in helping men who are in hot water with their wives. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
3137 Now don't worry - I've got your back. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
3138 Why do you think you don’t want the brush and soap? 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3139 Listen...that’s not what I meant by “I’ll rub your back...” 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3140 And then don't forget to floss. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3141 As your bath butler I feel it's only fair to warn you that you may be risking electrocution by Beyoncé. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
3142 Ok, but if I'm going to role-play your mother, you'll have to wash your own back. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3143 You can’t still believe that Mexico is going to pay for the dam. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3144 I see your medication has made the germaphobia worse 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
3145 It's not your fault. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3146 Say it after me, "I have a dirty id." 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
3147 Your biggest issues should bubble to the surface any minute now. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
3148 All our records are electronic now except this 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
3149 If this doesn't clean up your id, nothing will. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
3150 You want to really regress ... you have to come clean.... 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
3151 You seem awfully fond of Rubber Duckie. Do you think he might be the one? 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
3152 And now we loofah the subconscious. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3153 I needed a procedure to enhance revenue. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3154 I don’t mind you using my office during your lunch, but you need to finish before my patient arrives. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3155 I mean literally, come clean about your past. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3156 Here's the perfect scrub brush for your dirty mind. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3157 We can reverse the cause of your childhood trauma if we recreate the incident. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3158 Doc! You can’t just brush me off when I’m in hot water like this! 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
3159 Mr. Anderson, do you know what the word "puckered" means? 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3160 And you say this Rubber Duckie was the one? 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
3161 When was the last time you exfoliated? 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
3162 No, I said I did my clinical work at the University of THE Bath. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
3163 Have you ever dreamt of simultaneously drowning, being beaten to death with a brush, and having Dial soap crammed down your throat? Dial soap: Healthier Skin, Healthier You! 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
3164 Now that we've dealt with your mental hygiene, it's time to turn our attention to externals. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
3165 Shall I start with the toes, or with the teeth? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
3166 You can get it cheaper at Home Depot. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
3167 If the bath doesn't shrink you, I will. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
3168 I like to start out by scrubbing the slate clean. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
3169 Your mother wants you to use the soap with the brush. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
3170 I'm not sure what this has to do with a clean bill of mental health?" -" lean forward lemme get your back. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
3171 So...can I take your suit off now and get back to my bath? 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3172 Today, perhaps we should discuss this compulsion to multi-task. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3173 I think you will find Immersion therapy cleansing and very relaxing. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3174 Being in deep doodoo isn’t necessarily a bad thing. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3175 In this 'prison-to-society re-entry' program, we will help you get over your fear of shower stalls. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3176 I suppose it's my fault for suggesting role play. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3177 Good soap, bad brush? Is that even a thing? 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3178 Doctor, I feel like I'm short-circuiting. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3179 Actually I do my best thinking on planes, but to each his own. 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
3180 Forget the psychoanalysis, can you just scratch my forehead? 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3181 Now that your Id is submerged, we’ll scrub out some superego for the perfect cleanse of your psyche. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3182 ..and you say your mother never scratched your back...? 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3183 Is the water hot enough. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3184 If you thought you needed therapy before... 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3185 You wouldn't feel cold if you had as many degrees as me. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3186 A frog, if placed in hot water will jump out... However, if you slowly raise the temperature, it will not. BTW your "Trump-all-in-one-healthcare-treatment" has now reached 165 degrees F.... 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3187 At least there were no toilet training issues. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3188 The reality-principle says - you stink 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3189 After your armpits, give your conscience a good scrubbing. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3190 I totally understand your confusion, but during our next 'scrub away our daily problems and frustrations' therapy session, I'd prefer you change into a swimming suit first. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3191 Let me get that hard-to-reach corner of your memory. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3192 You'll finally get rid of those dirty thoughts and start with a clean slate. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3193 I'm sorry. Rubber Ducky is being used by Dr. Stein. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3194 This new therapy is to help you relax. It's not to imply that your washed up. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3195 Just to be clear, the back scrub isn't covered by the hourly fee. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3196 I feel that it's time to move on from your fear of sofas and talk about your fear of soap. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3197 Water you doing? 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3198 I zink you need a good scrubbing, no? 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3199 Try flossing Fred,it's a lot easier 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3200 Nein, nein, nein. You must vant to clean yourselv. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3201 I find that scrubbing away your first layer of denial works best. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3202 And if this doesn't work, we'll try aromatherapy. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3203 I call it "Submersion therapy." 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3204 If you expect me to help you, you need to come clean first! 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3205 I'm really in hot water this time. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3206 Explain what goes through your mind when you think about the baby. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3207 You need to tell me where to scrub. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3208 Make the decision, back brush or soap - you can't have both. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3209 Wash Away Your Worries: new aqua-therapy developed by Dr. Ned Levin, M.D. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3210 Let me know when you're ready for me to scrub your memories. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3211 This will scrub your neuroses away. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3212 What makes you think your body is dirty? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3213 Soon you'll sing, "Away go troubles down the drain." 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3214 I'll tell you when your done. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3215 This is the last time I make a house call... 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3216 Frankly, I don't find you that eager. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3217 I feel that you have not been entirely honest with me in our sessions. So, I believe that it is time for you to come clean. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3218 Don't sit there drowning in your sorrows. If you really want to die, just pull the plug! 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3219 ...and as you scrub, mindfully clean out your dirty little mind. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3220 It is time Donald for you to come clean. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3221 You're right, it's not conventional immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3222 I believe therapy is about shedding your outer layer. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3223 Today we will wash away the Mommy issues 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3224 i said imagine your happy place, not get it. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3225 Now that you are comfortable, let's talk about your childhood. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3226 You're already in hot water. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3227 In the words of our beloved Siggy, "Either you cheer the hell up or I scrub that scowl right off your whining little face!" 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3228 Not washing your cares away? Let’s move to a more intensive metaphorical treatment. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3229 Yes, and now for the mouth. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3230 Trust me. This is totally what Freud's patients did. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3231 Something's not right -- your shadow's going the wrong way. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3232 I think we are getting warmer. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3233 Now it is time to come clean. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3234 Make sure you get between your ears. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3235 "You've got a dirty mind!' 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3236 I can cure the poseidepus complex wth increasingly smaller domains. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3237 Now! Come Clean!! 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3238 I'm always in hot water over something." -- "Why do you think that?" -- "Because I'm always in hot water over something. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3239 Tell me about your ducky. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3240 Your insurance only covers the bath and a half hour of therapy. If you want your back scrubbed, you'll have to do it yourself. 1.0000 0.01835 55 55 0 0
3241 This is the way we wash our fears, wash our fears, wash our fears... 1.0000 0.01835 55 55 0 0
3242 What did you think immersion therapy meant? 1.0000 0.01835 55 55 0 0
3243 I don't think you are unstable. But, this is a home showroom and I'm a salesman. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3244 Sir, it is still my professional opinion that this is not an effective way to rid yourself of white privilege. 1.0000 0.01835 55 55 0 0
3245 I must be your mommy, now. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3246 I’m sorry, but we’re out of time. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3247 You're damed if you do, damned if you don't. 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
3248 Instead of truth bombs, I'm trying bath bombs! 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
3249 Try to go a little deeper. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
3250 Deep-seated feelings of guilt can only be released, before the concrete sets, with the most vigorous facial agitation. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
3251 I think of it as a solution. 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
3252 Did you check to see if that is FEMA approved? 1.0000 0.01653 61 61 0 0
3253 This gives new meaning to "scrubs" Doctor. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
3254 Hypnotherapy? I thought you asked for hydrotherapy. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
3255 First we'll deal with the crap your mother did to you. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
3256 Great, now watch me shower and you can be in my next movie. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
3257 Times up. Next week we’ll talk exfoliation. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
3258 Immerssion therapy will only work if you stop fighting it. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
3259 hmmm, the only thing that seems to surface is my mother and Herman Melville, Dr Freud 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3260 The bar of soap is your self-worth and the brush, your mother's lack of attention. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3261 You can only move forward if you let these revelations soak in 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3262 Now, would you please elaborate about your aqua phobia? 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3263 If you feel dirty I'm afraid it's the only known treatment. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3264 You did not come clean 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3265 Now that you're relaxed, let's brush away those anxieties. 1.0000 0.01835 55 55 0 0
3266 Trust me, Senator. Plausible deniability requires a well-scrubbed persona. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3267 And how does that make you peal? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3268 I’m concerned by your obsession with my credentials. 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3269 So tell me, what else gets you steamed? 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3270 Warning: may wash when shrinked 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3271 Whaddya mean it’s the wrong color? 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3272 Don't worry, I've seen everything. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3273 Your time is up, so we will bring out the rubber duckies next time 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3274 Is there room in there for me? We can bond better. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3275 My place, my rules. You get this brush and some soap. No rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3276 Well, this is easier than being in charge of the Cuban government. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3277 You know, I had to spend over a $100,000.00 in education to validate this therapy. I'm so glad it works. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3278 Just relax, but please, no bubbles! 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3279 My words can't help your filthy mind, but at least this will address your epidermis. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3280 My wife makes the soap. It's organic. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
3281 Don't worry, we'll get to your dirty laundry next week. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3282 Yes, the tub is equipped with no-Freudian-slip pads. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3283 It's best to start with a clean conscience. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3284 So, you still have that sinking feeling. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
3285 When I said "You yourself will need to find the plug," it wasn't a metaphor. 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3286 Und zo, zis veek vee take a different approach - yah? 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3287 How did it make you feel to have your mother still wash you after you became a man? Tell me or I'll have to wash you. 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3288 Switching the patient back and forth between psychotherapy and hydrotherapy works wonders for bipolar disorder. 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3289 We're here to scrub away at those dirty little secrets 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
3290 I'm trying to draw a link between the subconscious and exfoliation. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3291 And why is it you still feel dirty? 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
3292 So... what are you sinking about? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
3293 I always got your back 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
3294 This is more than just about those dirty thoughts. 1.0000 0.01527 66 66 0 0
3295 We can cleanse what's between the ears only after we cleanse what's behind them. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
3296 Your id is still just filthy. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
3297 It's about dam time. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3298 Are you warming up to the idea yet? 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
3299 You know, it is quite normal after a breakup to bathe in your own self-pity. May I join you? 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
3300 Sometimes a brush and soap is just a brush and soap. 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
3301 My branch of Psychology is Schadenfreude. 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
3302 Let’s get that blood cleaned up before you start in on how wrong I was. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
3303 Your mind is very dirty. 20 minutes more. 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3304 And how did you feel when they took the rubber ducky? 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3305 Sorry for the inconvenience. I’m getting my couch reupholstered. 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3306 Can we talk about your urge to multitask? 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3307 I'm going to scrub your back now. Tell me how that makes you feel. 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
3308 I'm thinking another degree or two? 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
3309 And I don't make fun of your dental occlusion. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
3310 I think you bit off more than you can chew. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3311 That branch is no dam good. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3312 I thought you said “aversion” therapy. 1.0000 0.01835 55 55 0 0
3313 I'm trying out submersion therapy. 1.0000 0.01835 55 55 0 0
3314 Sometimes it feels good to just wallow in it. 1.0000 0.01835 55 55 0 0
3315 The hot soak is covered in my fee, but the soapy scrub is extra. 1.0000 0.01835 55 55 0 0
3316 No amount of soap and scrubbing will remove that Trump stank. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3317 ...and before we revisit your traumatic exit from the womb, you might consider a little rub-a-dub-dub. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3318 They call me Dr. Feelgood. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3319 Sometimes you're irritatingly eager. 1.0000 0.01770 57 57 0 0
3320 You see, in sufficient quantities coffee can be quite relaxing. 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
3321 Today, if you prefer, we could try the loofah therapy. 1.0000 0.01550 65 65 0 0
3322 Can I ask you a personal question? 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3323 This hydrotherapy will be a benefit for both of us. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3324 Relax, shrinkage falls under medical confidentiality. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3325 "In collage I made ten bucks an hour for this job". 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3326 Personal hygiene before mental 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3327 And so, the resulting bathtub ring will represent a final washing away and reconciliation with your past. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3328 No, I won't help. Do your own dam work. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3329 Good luck taking the subway home. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3330 I said dammit, not dam it" 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3331 I said rub you down, not rub you out; looks like we’re going to have to work on your paranoia too. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3332 And did you like it when mommy did that? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3333 Well, I see we need to stop now. Your fingers are getting wrinkly. I think it best we continue from here at our next session. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3334 Look at it this way. . .you're not completely under water. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3335 It may be time to admit... Rubber Ducky is not the one. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3336 What do you mean you're not relaxed? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3337 Now that your outside is 'clean' let's work on that inner child, shall we? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3338 Your dirty thoughts have met their match. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3339 I can't help if you won't come clean. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3340 Are you ready to talk about your fear of showers? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3341 My specialty is spin, not getting you out of hot water. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3342 So when were you first aware of being deadly afraid of desserts? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3343 'A clean body is a clean mind.' I always say. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3344 I'm still sensing some tension. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3345 The safety of the womb? No, it's because you stink. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3346 Just let me stew for a minute. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3347 Would you feel more comfortable with a rubber ducky? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3348 It is not my place to judge but you have a very dirty mind. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3349 So, you wanted a clean start? 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
3350 Now that you have reached a sense of tranquility, it troubles me to tell you that we are out of towels. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3351 Tell me how you feel now that your behavior got you in hot water. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3352 What ever you did in Vegas did'nt stay in Vegas. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
3353 You still feel drained? 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3354 Do any of your Wet Dreams involve another person? 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3355 I want you to come clean. 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
3356 Tell me about your childhood bath toys. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3357 It's true. It shrinks. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
3358 Let's talk about your Dalton Trumbo obsession. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3359 So how did you feel when you saw your rubber duckie sink? 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
3360 Here, we work from the outside in. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3361 Your HMO won’t cover a rubber duck. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3362 While you're wallowing in self pity, can I scrub your back? 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3363 The way you talk about your mother is even making me feel dirty. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
3364 Good, good - you drowned the duckie -- let's get to the root of your anger! 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
3365 In the end, it's best if you come clean. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3366 Now, would you say your dreams have been very clean, moderately clean or not clean at all? 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3367 This is a standard treatment for people up to their necks in hot water. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3368 I'm a strong believer in immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3369 That's not good enough--not by a dam site! 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3370 After next week's swimming pool session I'm sure we'll conquer your fear of drowning once and for all! 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3371 This will only work if you want to get clean. 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
3372 Yes, Thomas - this is Mr. Weinstein’s old office. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3373 See ,the rubber ducky was crutch. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3374 it's a new alternative to traditional therapy that seems to be getting surprisingly good results. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3375 Mr. Vey let’s just say your Witzelsucht has progressed beyond the couch. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3376 It's not about you, it's about me. I listen better if you don't stink. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3377 How long have you had these wet dreams? 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3378 I know the Cialis commercials can be confusing. But I'm pretty sure they're not implying that warm baths will cure your erectile dysfunction. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3379 So, what I hear you saying is you're ready to pull the plug. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3380 Would this brush get the dirty out? 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3381 I think you either need to get used to being called Tubby, or do something about it. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3382 I distinctly told you Maple for the Living Room, don't you ever listen. 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3383 If you are to have a breakthrough, Mr. Jones, you will need to come clean 1.0000 0.01681 60 60 0 0
3384 Submersion therapy. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3385 Please, Mr. Bubbles was my father. Call me Dr. Bubbles. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
3386 You're already in hot water. Why not come clean? 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
3387 I can't help you if you don't come clean. 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3388 Only you Americans need psychoanalysis and baths every day. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3389 First the body, then the mind... 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3390 I think it's more relaxing that a couch, don't you? 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3391 On second thought, don't tell me about your mother. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3392 If you come clean I will testify for you in court. 1.0000 0.01802 56 56 0 0
3393 How can you expect me to help you if you don't come clean in our sessions? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
3394 So, are you feeling relaxed enough to hear my hourly rate? 1.0000 0.01170 86 86 0 0
3395 When did you first feel dirty? 1.0000 0.01036 97 97 0 0
3396 You said you finally wanted to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.00101 986 986 0 0
3397 There are no accidents ... why do YOU think you forgot your rubber duckie? 1.0000 0.00121 826 826 0 0
3398 Our time is up. Rinse now, and we’ll repeat next week. 1.0000 0.00106 944 944 0 0
3399 I think we're ready to start working on your fear of showers 1.0000 0.00104 962 962 0 0
3400 Today, we really need to get to the bottom of your fear of toasters. 1.0000 0.00117 856 856 0 0
3401 So what brought you to see an aromatherapist? 1.0000 0.00180 555 555 0 0
3402 Consider this a womb with a view. 1.0000 0.00172 582 582 0 0
3403 " Now close your eyes...and imagine you are lying on a couch' 1.0000 0.00135 739 739 0 0
3404 It's about time you came clean 1.0000 0.00132 756 756 0 0
3405 I was just losing too much business to Day Spas. 1.0000 0.00873 115 115 0 0
3406 So do I get the role Mr. Weinstein? 1.0000 0.00830 121 121 0 0
3407 I got rid of it because of the bedbug problem. 1.0000 0.00288 348 348 0 0
3408 The couch got to be something of a cliché. 1.0000 0.00120 831 831 0 0
3409 It worked on my dog... it's just tomato juice! 1.0000 0.00192 521 521 0 0
3410 Hand above the Water, please. 1.0000 0.00105 950 950 0 0
3411 Incidentally, there’s no need to mention this dream at our next session. 1.0000 0.00133 750 750 0 0
3412 My couch is being reupholstered. 1.0000 0.00104 961 961 0 0
3413 Displacement...Archimedes or Freud. Sometimes a bath is just a bath. 1.0000 0.00222 450 450 0 0
3414 And later, I'll massage your ego. 1.0000 0.00104 961 961 0 0
3415 Let's just dive right in. 1.0000 0.00134 744 744 0 0
3416 Is it worth $100/hr now? 1.0000 0.00150 667 667 0 0
3417 Don't forget to wash behind your fears, I mean ears. 1.0000 0.00151 662 662 0 0
3418 My therapy or my fees. . .either way, you get a good soaking. 1.0000 0.00150 665 665 0 0
3419 So, tell me why it bothers you that I don't change the water between patients. 1.0000 0.00531 189 189 0 0
3420 I think it's time you come clean with me. 1.0000 0.00118 849 849 0 0
3421 now let’s talk about self and steam 1.0000 0.00155 647 647 0 0
3422 I'll be frank with you, it's time to come clean. 1.0000 0.00138 724 724 0 0
3423 What did you think 'get clean' meant? 1.0000 0.00137 728 728 0 0
3424 Sure, I'm Abe Lincoln. Let's go with that. 1.0000 0.00141 712 712 0 0
3425 It's Dr Bubbles, nor Mr. Bubbles. 1.0000 0.00154 651 651 0 0
3426 Be careful getting out. You might Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.00121 828 828 0 0
3427 How long have you had these dirty thoughts ?? 1.0000 0.00143 698 698 0 0
3428 We've tried everything else. 1.0000 0.00179 559 559 0 0
3429 Remember, the alternative was the kale diet. 1.0000 0.00155 645 645 0 0
3430 It's either this or I drop in the toaster. 1.0000 0.00147 680 680 0 0
3431 Don't forget to get behind your id. 1.0000 0.00342 293 293 0 0
3432 For an extra fifty bucks I could enhance this experience with a lovely loofah and mood-elevating spearmint lather. 1.0000 0.00327 306 306 0 0
3433 Let's explore this irrational fear of getting bathed by a therapist. 1.0000 0.00314 319 319 0 0
3434 I see why they call you guys shrinks. 1.0000 0.00110 908 908 0 0
3435 Is it safe to say we haven't cured your germophobia? 1.0000 0.00189 531 531 0 0
3436 I have an ivory league degree. 1.0000 0.00183 548 548 0 0
3437 This is actually the minimum recommended treatment for former Trump employees. 1.0000 0.00111 899 899 0 0
3438 True, a therapy shower would use less water. Unfortunately our insurance doesn't cover Freudian slips. 1.0000 0.00092 1089 1089 0 0
3439 Trust me, this has a 98% cure rate for iPhone addiction. 1.0000 0.00114 877 877 0 0
3440 I warned you about attending White House press briefings. 1.0000 0.00100 1004 1004 0 0
3441 Because it's important that you come clean with me. 1.0000 0.00105 955 955 0 0
3442 If you think you're uncomfortable now, keep in mind we have a group bath tub session next week. You'll love Otis. He's a hugger. 1.0000 0.00118 849 849 0 0
3443 In retrospect, I should have gone with the couch. 1.0000 0.00093 1078 1078 0 0
3444 I know its cold water, but please no more 'shrink' jokes. 1.0000 0.00219 457 457 0 0
3445 Are you ready to come clean, or are you just going to wallow in it? 1.0000 0.00085 1171 1171 0 0
3446 Do you want me to just scratch the surface or probe deeper? 1.0000 0.00088 1131 1131 0 0
3447 So we agree that in three months you'll be able to take a shower by yourself. 1.0000 0.00099 1009 1009 0 0
3448 See, life is like bath water. It gets progressively worse the longer you stay in. 1.0000 0.00085 1173 1173 0 0
3449 Tell me more about those sinking feelings. 1.0000 0.00100 996 996 0 0
3450 Okay, close your eyes. You're in your mother's womb, safe, protected. And then you heard her say she was hoping for a girl? 1.0000 0.00132 760 760 0 0
3451 I understand, but right now it's the only effective treatment we have for Cialis abuse. 1.0000 0.00160 627 627 0 0
3452 I just want you to be totally relaxed before I tell you I’m sleeping with your wife. 1.0000 0.00099 1012 1012 0 0
3453 Perhaps your fondness for skunks is at odds with your desire for greater social acceptance. 1.0000 0.00113 885 885 0 0
3454 I hope you don't mind. The couch is being reupholstered. 1.0000 0.00101 989 989 0 0
3455 When the water is cold your time is up. 1.0000 0.00109 919 919 0 0
3456 Next time you can take your clothes off first. 1.0000 0.01325 76 76 0 0
3457 Now, show me where your mother refused to scrub you. 1.0000 0.00108 927 927 0 0
3458 This is not what I meant by 'immersion therapy,' but I'm glad it's helping. 1.0000 0.00108 925 925 0 0
3459 Now when did you first start having wet dreams? 1.0000 0.00124 809 809 0 0
3460 The door was open, I let myself in 1.0000 0.00165 606 606 0 0
3461 These aren't covered by your insurance...would you like them anyway? 1.0000 0.00100 1000 1000 0 0
3462 Don’t let all the diplomas fool you. 1.0000 0.00149 672 672 0 0
3463 For today's session, you be you, and I'll be that hated nanny. 1.0000 0.00120 837 837 0 0
3464 I'm afraid our time is up, you're starting to prune. 1.0000 0.00115 873 873 0 0
3465 I know you're the therapist, but shouldn’t I be in the tub? 1.0000 0.00297 337 337 0 0
3466 This is to test how much crap you'll take from an authority figure. 1.0000 0.00142 707 707 0 0
3467 I can give you the means, but you have to want to come clean. 1.0000 0.00109 920 920 0 0
3468 I meant it when I said I was a shrink. 1.0000 0.00098 1021 1021 0 0
3469 I'm trying to get at what's beneath the surface. 1.0000 0.00105 957 957 0 0
3470 Hmmm. How long have you worried about making waves? 1.0000 0.00133 752 752 0 0
3471 Your priest will wash away your sins. I’ve got your back. 1.0000 0.00098 1019 1019 0 0
3472 And when we're done, I'll take you to the cleaners. 1.0000 0.00090 1116 1116 0 0
3473 Be sure you scrub under your id. 1.0000 0.00115 869 869 0 0
3474 Before we confront your inner demons, we must first confront your outer stench. 1.0000 0.00128 784 784 0 0
3475 Why do YOU think I want to scrub your back? 1.0000 0.00096 1046 1046 0 0
3476 So tell me why you believe you are in in hot water. 1.0000 0.00088 1138 1138 0 0
3477 Yes. I trained at Colgate. Why do you ask? 1.0000 0.00205 488 488 0 0
3478 Just how long have you felt like you're in hot water? 1.0000 0.00147 680 680 0 0
3479 Submersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00117 853 853 0 0
3480 Please don't stand up. 1.0000 0.00259 386 386 0 0
3481 So, I see once again you're in hot water. 1.0000 0.00194 516 516 0 0
3482 Now, visualize those dirty thoughts going out with the bathwater. 1.0000 0.00255 392 392 0 0
3483 Exploring the psyche can be a dirty business. 1.0000 0.00219 458 458 0 0
3484 If this doesn't work we can move up to waterboarding. 1.0000 0.00230 436 436 0 0
3485 I call this “stew-in-your-own-juices” therapy. 1.0000 0.00224 446 446 0 0
3486 Some critics think I'm too literal, but my immersion therapy is actually quite effective. 1.0000 0.00208 482 482 0 0
3487 Doug, I can hand you the soap, hand you a brush. But it's your back, and only you can scrub it. 1.0000 0.00198 506 506 0 0
3488 Why yes, I did go to medical school. Why do you ask? 1.0000 0.00228 439 439 0 0
3489 Before dealing with your past issues you need to start with a clean slate. 1.0000 0.00281 356 356 0 0
3490 So who am I speaking with today? The Butcher, The Baker, or The Candlestick Maker? 1.0000 0.00312 321 321 0 0
3491 I hear you saying you feel like you're up to your neck in hot water. Why do you think you're having these feelings? 1.0000 0.00196 510 510 0 0
3492 This is our new immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00185 542 542 0 0
3493 Sounds like you've gotten yourself into some hot water 1.0000 0.00216 464 464 0 0
3494 I had the drowning dream again. 1.0000 0.00220 455 455 0 0
3495 Now we are getting through some of the real dirt. 1.0000 0.00219 458 458 0 0
3496 I sense you really do want to come clean. 1.0000 0.00223 448 448 0 0
3497 So, Mr. Schwermer, in your nightmare, how did it make you feel when the 'man who looked a lot like me' dropped the soap in the tub and began to fish around for it with his hands? 1.0000 0.00240 418 418 0 0
3498 Did I mention that I got my degree from the University of Bath? 1.0000 0.00213 469 469 0 0
3499 Now the the soap and brush is a metaphor. Nothing can actually wash away your decision to vote for a 3rd party candidate. 1.0000 0.00208 482 482 0 0
3500 Psychotherapy is a competitive business. A nice couch just doesn't cut it anymore. 1.0000 0.00210 477 477 0 0
3501 Thanks for taking your session in here. My Kleptomania group took my couch. 1.0000 0.00995 101 101 0 0
3502 I’m gonna need the ducky back. 1.0000 0.00217 461 461 0 0
3503 Which personality needs his back scrubbed? 1.0000 0.00244 411 411 0 0
3504 We're gonna wash those troubles away 1.0000 0.00323 310 310 0 0
3505 Should we start with your toes or your daddy issues? 1.0000 0.00252 397 397 0 0
3506 I just feel like I'm always in hot water. 1.0000 0.00242 413 413 0 0
3507 I’ve got a feeling you’re going to come clean this session. 1.0000 0.00252 398 398 0 0
3508 No, Mr. Spacey. The immersion therapy doesn't have a happy ending. 1.0000 0.00257 389 389 0 0
3509 So you were saying that sometimes you feel like you're in over your head. 1.0000 0.00245 409 409 0 0
3510 It works as well as the old method of analysis, but now I also get to bill you for hot water and, if nothing else, you leave clean. 1.0000 0.00664 151 151 0 0
3511 Now let's explore those hard to reach memories 1.0000 0.00215 466 466 0 0
3512 This represents the mother; this the father. 1.0000 0.00232 432 432 0 0
3513 I wish you had waited for my other patient to leave 1.0000 0.00267 375 375 0 0
3514 Tell me about your relationship with your plumber. 1.0000 0.00240 417 417 0 0
3515 Duckies cost extra. 1.0000 0.01460 69 69 0 0
3516 You're in hot water again. Why not make the best of it. 1.0000 0.00226 443 443 0 0
3517 And why do you think your life is going down the drain? 1.0000 0.00232 432 432 0 0
3518 And remember, you must learn to loofah yourself before you can ever loofah others. 1.0000 0.00262 382 382 0 0
3519 I don't know, Doc. I just always feel so dirty. 1.0000 0.00224 446 446 0 0
3520 When did this "sinking feeling" start? 1.0000 0.00179 560 560 0 0
3521 Tell me again why you feel like your always getting yourself in hot water. 1.0000 0.00205 489 489 0 0
3522 Apparently we had different objectives when I recommended "immersion" therapy 1.0000 0.00156 640 640 0 0
3523 You have to come clean, you know. 1.0000 0.00173 578 578 0 0
3524 I thought we would try a little submersion therapy today 1.0000 0.00189 530 530 0 0
3525 And now, just ahead, is the birthing canal. 1.0000 0.00158 633 633 0 0
3526 This is not what I meant when I said, "I need a clean start." 1.0000 0.00173 577 577 0 0
3527 We'll work on mental hygiene next time. 1.0000 0.00149 670 670 0 0
3528 Let me know when you start to prune. That means our times up. 1.0000 0.00178 563 563 0 0
3529 I don't think this is what Mr. Mueller meant when he said, "Come clean." 1.0000 0.00289 346 346 0 0
3530 I charge $250 an hour, but the soap is free. 1.0000 0.00412 243 243 0 0
3531 At this stage, it’s quite normal to feel a little exposed. 1.0000 0.00208 481 481 0 0
3532 I need you to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.00141 710 710 0 0
3533 Alrighty, we can continue now that the Jello has set! 1.0000 0.00145 691 691 0 0
3534 I call it 'brain washing.' 1.0000 0.00378 265 265 0 0
3535 I'm sorry Beckwith, but I don't believe even a full body wash will make you feel Jung again. 1.0000 0.00165 608 608 0 0
3536 So last time we met, you said you felt like you'd written a unique caption but then it would turn out 300 people had also written the exact same unique caption? 1.0000 0.00177 564 564 0 0
3537 I may be a Freudian but I'm still going to wash your mouth out for what you said about your mother. 1.0000 0.00177 564 564 0 0
3538 Now then, let’s proceed with your back story. 1.0000 0.00150 667 667 0 0
3539 Yes, Peter, I know you're neck deep in hot water. But how does that make you *feel*? 1.0000 0.00164 612 612 0 0
3540 Now I know why they call them a shrink , 1.0000 0.00170 589 589 0 0
3541 And now we're gonna wash that man right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.00187 534 534 0 0
3542 Not to worry, sometimes a scrub brush is just a scrub brush. 1.0000 0.00142 706 706 0 0
3543 I think you’ll have to get to the bottom of it yourself. 1.0000 0.00210 477 477 0 0
3544 I've always soaked my clients. Now, I don't feel guilty about it. 1.0000 0.00223 449 449 0 0
3545 Stan wasn’t certain his therapist really understood immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00985 102 102 0 0
3546 It's okay, I put a non-Freudian slip mat on the bottom. 1.0000 0.00197 509 509 0 0
3547 Get used to it, shrinkage happens. 1.0000 0.00180 555 555 0 0
3548 To the contrary, you’re anything but washed up. 1.0000 0.00203 494 494 0 0
3549 It's feel good therapy, though of course you're being soaked. 1.0000 0.00191 523 523 0 0
3550 I recommend six fifty-gallon sessions. 1.0000 0.00206 487 487 0 0
3551 So, when did you first feel exfoliated? 1.0000 0.00143 702 702 0 0
3552 You'll feel much better if you allow yourself to come clean. Just give that thought a couple of moments to soak in. 1.0000 0.00160 626 626 0 0
3553 You do realize this will not remove those dirty thoughts. 1.0000 0.00173 577 577 0 0
3554 I love this new immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00186 539 539 0 0
3555 For this to work, you have to call me mommy. 1.0000 0.00225 445 445 0 0
3556 Ok. Now I'm going to slowly hand you the soap and brush. 1.0000 0.00220 455 455 0 0
3557 As your psychiatrist I must congratulate you on finally deciding to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.00177 567 567 0 0
3558 Because I'm a germaphobe. Why do you ask? 1.0000 0.00190 527 527 0 0
3559 Tell me about your first wet dream. 1.0000 0.00147 679 679 0 0
3560 now wash away the guilt 1.0000 0.00248 403 403 0 0
3561 Sometimes a bathtub is just a bathtub, but not always. 1.0000 0.00192 522 522 0 0
3562 It's best to come clean in therapy. 1.0000 0.00157 637 637 0 0
3563 When my friends said “He’s gonna soak you for that first visit,” well, I guess I thought they meant something completely different. 1.0000 0.00091 1101 1101 0 0
3564 Your time is almost up. I can do your back now or we can save it for next Tuesday, when we can delve into your fear of awkward social situations. 1.0000 0.00086 1168 1168 0 0
3565 We can rule out aquaphobia. 1.0000 0.00066 1506 1506 0 0
3566 It’s called immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00041 2414 2414 0 0
3567 You said you wanted to come clean. 1.0000 0.00031 3276 3276 0 0
3568 These two men in your dream, do they say anything besides "rub a dub dub"? 1.0000 0.00033 3008 3008 0 0
3569 First, bed. Now, bath. Then we'll get to the beyond. 1.0000 0.00046 2180 2180 0 0
3570 I'm more of a "shrivel" than a "shrink". 1.0000 0.00038 2642 2642 0 0
3571 Well, of course they're wet dreams... 1.0000 0.00032 3117 3117 0 0
3572 Why do YOU think you didn’t bring your rubber duckie? 1.0000 0.00040 2473 2473 0 0
3573 I’ve got your back. 1.0000 0.00040 2499 2499 0 0
3574 The couch was becoming a cliché. 1.0000 0.00033 3062 3062 0 0
3575 When most of my patients say they're in hot water, they usually mean it as metaphor. 1.0000 0.00037 2679 2679 0 0
3576 At least your life isn't in the toilet! 1.0000 0.00034 2934 2934 0 0
3577 Do you mind if my 4 o'clock joins you? 1.0000 0.00030 3303 3303 0 0
3578 And why did you feel drained at the end of the last session? 1.0000 0.00036 2783 2783 0 0
3579 The water represents your feelings of helplessness. The soap represents your desire to wash away past failures. The back scrubber is from Walmart. 1.0000 0.00055 1820 1820 0 0
3580 So, tell me...is your tub half full or half empty? 1.0000 0.00029 3411 3411 0 0
3581 I see our bathtime is up... 1.0000 0.00029 3493 3493 0 0
3582 Ok, it’s time for you to come clean.... 1.0000 0.00042 2354 2354 0 0
3583 Why, what did you think "Total Immersion Therapy" was like? 1.0000 0.00026 3795 3795 0 0
3584 Go on. We're interested in what's below the surface. 1.0000 0.00043 2313 2313 0 0
3585 I know it's a lot to absorb. 1.0000 0.00043 2342 2342 0 0
3586 Perhaps it's time to start talking about life AFTER you were born. 1.0000 0.00045 2246 2246 0 0
3587 And after we'll talk about godliness. 1.0000 0.00049 2039 2039 0 0
3588 You wait until now to tell me you were speaking metaphorically? 1.0000 0.00035 2876 2876 0 0
3589 Scrub you like your mommy did? Now we’re getting somewhere. 1.0000 0.00041 2413 2413 0 0
3590 I'm pretty sure one of us is dreaming 1.0000 0.00045 2217 2217 0 0
3591 You think you’re getting soaked now? Wait until you see my bill. 1.0000 0.00038 2638 2638 0 0
3592 I can give you the tools, but you have to do the work yourself. 1.0000 0.00039 2580 2580 0 0
3593 When did you first believe you were in a bath tub? 1.0000 0.00040 2503 2503 0 0
3594 No, it's not just symbolic. You actually need a bath. 1.0000 0.00043 2315 2315 0 0
3595 Where exactly are the dirty thoughts? 1.0000 0.00226 443 443 0 0
3596 Still having those dirty thoughts? 1.0000 0.00055 1810 1810 0 0
3597 All I can do is give you the tools... 1.0000 0.00056 1795 1795 0 0
3598 Just relax. I've got your back. 1.0000 0.00037 2708 2708 0 0
3599 Now that the cement has set we can talk fees.. 1.0000 0.00042 2354 2354 0 0
3600 You are beginning to feel soapy, very, very soapy. 1.0000 0.00045 2225 2225 0 0
3601 So, what makes you think people don't respect your boundaries? 1.0000 0.00040 2482 2482 0 0
3602 You know, sometimes a bar of soap is just a bar of soap. 1.0000 0.00048 2078 2078 0 0
3603 Yes, but other than wet, how does that make you feel? 1.0000 0.00036 2775 2775 0 0
3604 I deal in psycho-bubble... 1.0000 0.00052 1920 1920 0 0
3605 Let me know if this starts to feel inappropriate. 1.0000 0.00030 3354 3354 0 0
3606 How can you and Margaret do the reciprocal scrubbing exercise if you won't let her up for air? 1.0000 0.00030 3388 3388 0 0
3607 Do you need a duckie, or do you want a duckie? 1.0000 0.00023 4436 4436 0 0
3608 I’m a marine psychologist. 1.0000 0.00020 4950 4950 0 0
3609 Go deeper. 1.0000 0.00024 4120 4120 0 0
3610 This is how we came to be called, "shrinks." 1.0000 0.00022 4538 4538 0 0
3611 It’s called immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00021 4814 4814 0 0
3612 Of course it's cold - you're my 4th patient today! 1.0000 0.00020 4915 4915 0 0
3613 No, you’ll still be conflicted but you’ll smell better. 1.0000 0.00021 4817 4817 0 0
3614 Now, here is where the treatment becomes a bit... controversial. 1.0000 0.00020 5020 5020 0 0
3615 Later, as trust grows and inhibitions lessen, you'll remove your clothes and shoes. 1.0000 0.00053 1905 1905 0 0
3616 I prefer to call it hydrotherapy, not "soaking my patients". 1.0000 0.00020 4939 4939 0 0
3617 Just let that thought soak in. 1.0000 0.00063 1595 1595 0 0
3618 So, a wife, three daughters, and one bathroom at home. Go on. 1.0000 0.00040 2527 2527 0 0
3619 The last person I treated stayed clean for 4 years. 1.0000 0.00020 5011 5011 0 0
3620 As it turns out, you actually are a dirty old man. 1.0000 0.00021 4859 4859 0 0
3621 I can't make you scrub. You have to want to scrub. 1.0000 0.00021 4734 4734 0 0
3622 If I see any more bubbles, this session is over. 1.0000 0.00024 4142 4142 0 0
3623 I see you've moved beyond compulsive hand washing. 1.0000 0.00024 4242 4242 0 0
3624 No, electroshock therapy would be a really bad idea right now. 1.0000 0.00068 1470 1470 0 0
3625 The next step is godliness. 1.0000 0.00070 1434 1434 0 0
3626 I can't help you if you don't come clean. 1.0000 0.00029 3434 3434 0 0
3627 Our time is up. We'll do your back next week. 1.0000 0.00021 4701 4701 0 0
3628 You're getting soapy...very soapy... 1.0000 0.00027 3711 3711 0 0
3629 You may have noticed I am from the Jacuzzian school of thought. 1.0000 0.00029 3503 3503 0 0
3630 Just let that thought soak in. 1.0000 0.00026 3859 3859 0 0
3631 You think I'm soaking you now, wait until you get my bill. 1.0000 0.00026 3847 3847 0 0
3632 Well you seem to be keeping your head above water. 1.0000 0.00026 3884 3884 0 0
3633 Now, I want you to imagine you are lying on a couch. 1.0000 0.00033 3038 3038 0 0
3634 If you want a loofah you'll need to see a Jungian. 1.0000 0.00027 3731 3731 0 0
3635 No, the soap is your mother. The brush is Uncle Murray. 1.0000 0.00024 4162 4162 0 0
3636 I'm not going to lie, this is going to get weird. 1.0000 0.00079 1259 1259 0 0
3637 Don't forget to wash behind your fears. 1.0000 0.00030 3341 3341 0 0
3638 Sometimes a bar of soap is just a bar a soap. 1.0000 0.00029 3434 3434 0 0
3639 Just be careful when you get out. You don't want to Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.00025 3940 3940 0 0
3640 After a few more sessions let's try adding a small boat. 1.0000 0.00029 3495 3495 0 0
3641 It's immersion therapy. What did you expect? 1.0000 0.00028 3580 3580 0 0
3642 If you say, 'Up periscope' again, I'll hit it with this. 1.0000 0.00025 4013 4013 0 0
3643 Therapy? no. But it should help with your "no one wants to be near me" problem. 1.0000 0.00028 3531 3531 0 0
3644 No, that's not why we're called "shrinks". 1.0000 0.00027 3751 3751 0 0
3645 Today we will be analyzing your wet dreams. 1.0000 0.00025 3933 3933 0 0
3646 I think there are some areas that you are having trouble reaching. 1.0000 0.00081 1242 1242 0 0
3647 So how long have you been clean? 1.0000 0.00213 471 471 0 0
3648 We call it a psychobath. 1.0000 0.00041 2432 2432 0 0
3649 Your new insurance doesn’t cover towels. 1.0000 0.00171 586 586 0 0
3650 It's really important that you come clean with me. 1.0000 0.00079 1271 1271 0 0
3651 And then I realised, my plumber is making more money than I am. 1.0000 0.00089 1130 1130 0 0
3652 Always remember, I've got your back. 1.0000 0.00084 1188 1188 0 0
3653 Tell me why you're in hot water. 1.0000 0.00077 1299 1299 0 0
3654 First I will scrape off some surface insecurities, then we will clean out those deep seated anxieties. 1.0000 0.00086 1170 1170 0 0
3655 Shrink or swim? 1.0000 0.00062 1623 1623 0 0
3656 Now Phil, what would you like to say to Mr. Soap, and Mrs. Brush? 1.0000 0.00090 1110 1110 0 0
3657 No, it won't open up your subconscious. But it will open up your pores. 1.0000 0.00092 1091 1091 0 0
3658 Look, I'm a shrink. You have to expect a little shrinkage. 1.0000 0.00058 1737 1737 0 0
3659 I can hand you the tools, but only You can do the work. 1.0000 0.00066 1526 1526 0 0
3660 Trump-care will pay for your psycho-bath only if you use Ivanka soap and the DT Junior brush. 1.0000 0.00069 1444 1444 0 0
3661 No, you just really need a bath. 1.0000 0.00082 1223 1223 0 0
3662 Welcome to immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00067 1483 1483 0 0
3663 Let that soak in 1.0000 0.00068 1468 1468 0 0
3664 Yes: you can pee. 1.0000 0.00076 1308 1308 0 0
3665 Maybe it just feels like you're up to your neck in hot water. 1.0000 0.00062 1603 1603 0 0
3666 Ninety-eight percent of my patients report feeling more relaxed, and smelling nice. 1.0000 0.00071 1416 1416 0 0
3667 I'm not sure you understand immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00064 1566 1566 0 0
3668 Are you moisturizing between visits? I can't help you if you're not going to help yourself. 1.0000 0.00075 1340 1340 0 0
3669 "It's best if you don't question my methods". 1.0000 0.00084 1197 1197 0 0
3670 Relax. You're not my only patient in hot water. 1.0000 0.00073 1376 1376 0 0
3671 Now scrub away the guilt from voting for him. 1.0000 0.00096 1041 1041 0 0
3672 Well, yes, your wallet is also taking a bath. 1.0000 0.00103 970 970 0 0
3673 If you won't come clean, I can't help you! 1.0000 0.00086 1160 1160 0 0
3674 How did you feel when Rubber Duckie left? 1.0000 0.00080 1248 1248 0 0
3675 Just try to keep your head above water. 1.0000 0.00090 1112 1112 0 0
3676 Lather, rinse, recall repressed emotions, repeat. 1.0000 0.00099 1006 1006 0 0
3677 Guilt? Your soaking in it. 1.0000 0.00075 1329 1329 0 0
3678 I'm sorry, but it looks like we're about to run over. Same time next week? 1.0000 0.00077 1296 1296 0 0
3679 It's strictly a last resort, but I've had some success with brainwashing. 1.0000 0.00069 1452 1452 0 0
3680 What do you mean I soak you every time you have an appointment? 1.0000 0.00267 375 375 0 0
3681 I deal in psycho-bubble, not babble. 1.0000 0.00071 1407 1407 0 0
3682 Let's go deeper. 1.0000 0.00064 1551 1551 0 0
3683 OK, so let's blame this one on MY mother. 1.0000 0.01015 99 99 0 0
3684 I know you'd like to continue your long hot soak in self-pity and discontent but our hour is up. 1.0000 0.00085 1183 1183 0 0
3685 You're getting soapy, veeeery soapy. 1.0000 0.00085 1177 1177 0 0
3686 This won't work if you don't let me get in. 1.0000 0.00451 222 222 0 0
3687 No, please, don’t get up. 1.0000 0.00085 1182 1182 0 0
3688 Today I'm soaking you for five hundred. 1.0000 0.00083 1201 1201 0 0
3689 So why do you think you NEED a towel, Frank? 1.0000 0.00065 1547 1547 0 0
3690 In my expert opinion, you’re bathological. 1.0000 0.00061 1648 1648 0 0
3691 Sometimes a rubber ducky is just a rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.00056 1776 1776 0 0
3692 Honestly doc, it’s just hard to keep my head above water. 1.0000 0.00155 644 644 0 0
3693 I can tell a lot about a person by what part they scrub first. 1.0000 0.00058 1712 1712 0 0
3694 I'm having the chaise reupholstered. I hope you don't mind. 1.0000 0.00051 1974 1974 0 0
3695 My method derives from a combination of Freud, Jung, and of course, Seinfeld. 1.0000 0.00064 1565 1565 0 0
3696 Look, I promised to help you get a clean start. 1.0000 0.00055 1813 1813 0 0
3697 It's the latest in immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00055 1830 1830 0 0
3698 I don't think you are ready for bubbles. 1.0000 0.00048 2072 2072 0 0
3699 Before we go any further, I want to see both of your hands. 1.0000 0.00062 1601 1601 0 0
3700 Don't forget to wash behind your id 1.0000 0.00058 1723 1723 0 0
3701 Yes, it's unorthodox, but we seem to get more Freudian slips in the tub. 1.0000 0.00058 1733 1733 0 0
3702 I came up with this therapeutic technique just before they revoked my license. 1.0000 0.00062 1615 1615 0 0
3703 May I offer you a rubber duckie, or would you think I’m some kind of quack? 1.0000 0.00049 2056 2056 0 0
3704 We've been over this, warm water is for patients who pay on time 1.0000 0.00148 674 674 0 0
3705 I call it “Head, Bath & Beyond”. 1.0000 0.00041 2443 2443 0 0
3706 And now for some brain-washing. 1.0000 0.00051 1957 1957 0 0
3707 So, tell me about this "sinking feeling". 1.0000 0.00046 2160 2160 0 0
3708 Your session is done Mr. Wellsly. Time for you to pull the plug. 1.0000 0.00078 1275 1275 0 0
3709 Time to come clean. 1.0000 0.00057 1770 1770 0 0
3710 When I snap my fingers you will awaken and have no recollection of my being in the tub with you. 1.0000 0.00054 1860 1860 0 0
3711 Well, what did you imagine immersion therapy would entail? 1.0000 0.00116 862 862 0 0
3712 In this session, let's throw out the inner child with the bath water. 1.0000 0.00076 1320 1320 0 0
3713 Electroshock therapy might not be the best place to start. 1.0000 0.00068 1465 1465 0 0
3714 I’m sorry. You thought it was a metaphor? 1.0000 0.00066 1512 1512 0 0
3715 Relax. It's covered. 1.0000 0.00067 1489 1489 0 0
3716 Now I want you to let it all soak in. 1.0000 0.00101 989 989 0 0
3717 I limit all appointments to 15 minutes so you don't go all pruney. 1.0000 0.00181 554 554 0 0
3718 How long have you had the feeling that you were the subject of a caption competition? 1.0000 0.00102 978 978 0 0
3719 Scrubbing off Trump stink is kind of tough isn't it Mr. Speaker. 1.0000 0.00135 741 741 0 0
3720 If this goes well, we'll give the brainwashing a try. 1.0000 0.00068 1474 1474 0 0
3721 This tub was in the office and I thought, "There are no coincidences." 1.0000 0.00059 1700 1700 0 0
3722 So you got yourself in hot water again. Tell me about it. 1.0000 0.00058 1721 1721 0 0
3723 No rubber ducky. I see that as progress. 1.0000 0.00064 1562 1562 0 0
3724 Now you understand why they call me a shrink. 1.0000 0.00053 1878 1878 0 0
3725 Psychiatrist? I'm a podiatrist. 1.0000 0.00076 1313 1313 0 0
3726 Explain to me why you think you're in hot water. 1.0000 0.00068 1464 1464 0 0
3727 Now when you tell me the water is too cold, which parent comes to mind? 1.0000 0.00064 1567 1567 0 0
3728 How would you feel about going a little deeper? 1.0000 0.00051 1943 1943 0 0
3729 Well, I wouldn't say you're all washed up, but you're close. 1.0000 0.00062 1604 1604 0 0
3730 Since this is our second session , let's introduce soap. 1.0000 0.00064 1556 1556 0 0
3731 “Rub-a-dub-dub, three men in a tub...” you do know that two of them aren’t real, right? 1.0000 0.00190 528 528 0 0
3732 Now show me where the soap touched you. 1.0000 0.01290 78 78 0 0
3733 If it helps you to relax, think of me as a mental hygienist. 1.0000 0.00226 443 443 0 0
3734 I’m here to provide you the tools to deal with those feelings. Which do you prefer, loofah or brush? 1.0000 0.00573 175 175 0 0
3735 Sponge baths are extra. 1.0000 0.00717 140 140 0 0
3736 I can offer you this brush or fragrant sponge, but you still have to be done by 2:55. 1.0000 0.00717 140 140 0 0
3737 OK, Mr. O'Reilly, now that we've re-established the details of scene, are you ready to face the loofah? 1.0000 0.00733 137 137 0 0
3738 Let's return to your memories of the womb 1.0000 0.00712 141 141 0 0
3739 Rub-a-dub-dub, therapy in the tub. 1.0000 0.00707 142 142 0 0
3740 When I snap my fingers you will be clean. 1.0000 0.00707 142 142 0 0
3741 My goal is to have you leave with a clean conscience. 1.0000 0.00939 107 107 0 0
3742 Some of my younger patients felt the couch was a bit passé. 1.0000 0.00687 146 146 0 0
3743 Holistic mind-body therapy means you can spare us both your angst and just scrub the parts that feel dirty. 1.0000 0.00702 143 143 0 0
3744 I’m trained in both psycho and hydro therapy methodologies. 1.0000 0.00702 143 143 0 0
3745 It's time to clean your conscience. 1.0000 0.00643 156 156 0 0
3746 Our session time is up. Please be careful not to have a Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.00733 137 137 0 0
3747 There are many people your age without a rubber ducky to play with in the bathtub. 1.0000 0.00683 147 147 0 0
3748 ...when I count up from 1 to 5, you will awaken feeling cleansed in mind & body 1.0000 0.00697 144 144 0 0
3749 You are making great progress! Soon we can start working with the jacuzzi. 1.0000 0.00697 144 144 0 0
3750 Bubbles are for my higher paying patients. 1.0000 0.00697 144 144 0 0
3751 I don't believe you're ready for group therapy. 1.0000 0.00697 144 144 0 0
3752 I think we're ready for the Calgon method. 1.0000 0.00810 124 124 0 0
3753 Yes, go on....you were telling me about your years in the submarine corps. 1.0000 0.00697 144 144 0 0
3754 Instead of stewing about your past, why not exfoliate? 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3755 Can I stop holding your soap now? 1.0000 0.00738 136 136 0 0
3756 I can only offer you the soap and the brush. If you want your back washed, you'll need to decide to wash it yourself. 1.0000 0.00810 124 124 0 0
3757 ...and away go troubles down the drain. 1.0000 0.01081 93 93 0 0
3758 Are you going to come clean now or do we have to schedule a booster session? 1.0000 0.00749 134 134 0 0
3759 Now you’ll want that id squeaky clean before you start casting again. 1.0000 0.00749 134 134 0 0
3760 I think we're zeroing in on why you feel like you're always in hot water. 1.0000 0.00766 131 131 0 0
3761 "And does that still make you sad when I refuse to wash your feet and spank you with this brush"? 1.0000 0.00766 131 131 0 0
3762 Do you ever feel drained after one of our sessions? 1.0000 0.00766 131 131 0 0
3763 And how does this make you feel? 1.0000 0.00766 131 131 0 0
3764 He kept grabbing at me with those tiny tiny hands. You never saw such tiny hands... 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
3765 This is not going to solve your money laundering issues. 1.0000 0.00823 122 122 0 0
3766 Yes, I believe that Donald Trump also misses HIS rubber duckie. 1.0000 0.00712 141 141 0 0
3767 Obviously I disagree. Sometimes it is good to stew in your own juices. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
3768 So, all right already: it's close to Godliness, true; but money laundering, that's another story. 1.0000 0.00707 142 142 0 0
3769 Just relax Mr Trump, its quick drying cement. 1.0000 0.00722 139 139 0 0
3770 Now, if you'll just stand up, let's try to get to the real you. 1.0000 0.00722 139 139 0 0
3771 Tell me about your conditioner. 1.0000 0.00738 136 136 0 0
3772 Want me to get your back? 1.0000 0.00738 136 136 0 0
3773 Ja, the very cold bath will definitely shrink something...but it will not be your big ego. 1.0000 0.00738 136 136 0 0
3774 Now which of these reminds you of your mother, and which of your father? 1.0000 0.00772 130 130 0 0
3775 Intensive massage therapy first requires understanding from where the tension is coming. 1.0000 0.00766 131 131 0 0
3776 Follow my loofah with your eyes...you are getting very soapy. 1.0000 0.00664 151 151 0 0
3777 Bobby, you do know if you stepped out of the tub, put your feet on the floor, wrapped the towel around you, and opened the door, you might discover there's a party going on. 1.0000 0.00697 144 144 0 0
3778 As he dozed in his bath, Morton dreamed that a strange, learned man appeared, urging him to do more. 1.0000 0.00635 158 158 0 0
3779 ....and why do you think you're Jimmy Hoffa? 1.0000 0.00631 159 159 0 0
3780 Do clean behind your fears. 1.0000 0.00615 163 163 0 0
3781 Wow, you're really taking to visualization therapy. 1.0000 0.00627 160 160 0 0
3782 I know. I need to work on my bathside manner 1.0000 0.00612 164 164 0 0
3783 Let’s see if we can get at that hard-to-reach Id. 1.0000 0.00697 144 144 0 0
3784 Sorry, my last session ran a little over. 1.0000 0.00604 166 166 0 0
3785 Other options exhausted, prompts were added to encourage Barry to come clean. 1.0000 0.00576 174 174 0 0
3786 People usually prefer to sit on a couch and talk, but I guess this is cool, too. 1.0000 0.00601 167 167 0 0
3787 Try to imagine you're not taking a bath. 1.0000 0.00601 167 167 0 0
3788 With this method, reaching back can be a simple affair. 1.0000 0.00601 167 167 0 0
3789 To you, in your current state of mind, it may seem experimental . . . 1.0000 0.00580 173 173 0 0
3790 Now that we seem to have resolved your fear of water, it's time to work on your fear of soap and scrub brushes. 1.0000 0.00554 181 181 0 0
3791 After four Napoleons I enjoy a Marat. 1.0000 0.00576 174 174 0 0
3792 There's one last step in submersion psychoanalysis. Please take this soap. 1.0000 0.00576 174 174 0 0
3793 Let that soak in until our next session 1.0000 0.00727 138 138 0 0
3794 You're doing it wrong. 1.0000 0.00639 157 157 0 0
3795 Sure, I can get your back. But what makes you doubt your ability to do it yourself? 1.0000 0.00784 128 128 0 0
3796 You've got something between your teeth. 1.0000 0.00643 156 156 0 0
3797 If you use this soap you may Freudian slip... 1.0000 0.00631 159 159 0 0
3798 Another possibility is that you really did see a rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.00678 148 148 0 0
3799 Now that we've washed behind your ears, tell me about your mother. 1.0000 0.00678 148 148 0 0
3800 How does that third ripple from the right remind you of Buster Davis, bully of the sixth grade? 1.0000 0.00678 148 148 0 0
3801 You missed a spot. 1.0000 0.00678 148 148 0 0
3802 You've got something in your teeth. 1.0000 0.00692 145 145 0 0
3803 Now that we've washed your worries away, let's soak away up your sorrows. 1.0000 0.00707 142 142 0 0
3804 Sponge baths aren't covered by insurance. 1.0000 0.00673 149 149 0 0
3805 You think you're being soaked now?.... Wait till you get the bill! 1.0000 0.00673 149 149 0 0
3806 Now, let's pretend the brush is your mother and the soap your father, where would you like to start? 1.0000 0.00687 146 146 0 0
3807 Your fantasy is getting in the way of my phobia. 1.0000 0.00656 153 153 0 0
3808 Ve can help you replace your dirty thoughts viss clean vuns. 1.0000 0.00669 150 150 0 0
3809 Now just rub in the Prozac soap. 1.0000 0.00664 151 151 0 0
3810 You may choose one, but choose wisely. 1.0000 0.00905 111 111 0 0
3811 I don't care how you feel about your mother—she was right! Take these, and shut up! 1.0000 0.00660 152 152 0 0
3812 Let's start by asking your imaginary duck to stop saying 'quack'. 1.0000 0.01026 98 98 0 0
3813 What did you expect to get for the Groupon rate? 1.0000 0.01026 98 98 0 0
3814 The beginnings of “Bedside, Bath, and Beyond” 1.0000 0.00631 159 159 0 0
3815 And how does it make you feel to be stewing in your own juices? 1.0000 0.00722 139 139 0 0
3816 Let's work on those boundary issues, shall we? 1.0000 0.00772 130 130 0 0
3817 Your trouble is you stink. 1.0000 0.00755 133 133 0 0
3818 A mind as dirty as yours calls for a more holistic approach. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
3819 Are those soap bubbles, or are you just happy to see me? 1.0000 0.00889 113 113 0 0
3820 All I'm suggesting is that she said "bad B-O", not "bad E-GO". 1.0000 0.01105 91 91 0 0
3821 Tell me about your rubber duckie. 1.0000 0.00930 108 108 0 0
3822 I call my Theory of the Tubconscious Mind. 1.0000 0.01399 72 72 0 0
3823 Are you relaxed yet or would you like me to scrub your back? 1.0000 0.00905 111 111 0 0
3824 I'm your shrink, don't pretend I'm your loofah-boy. 1.0000 0.00948 106 106 0 0
3825 You must get beyond zee fact that your vife ran away with Abdul Loofah. 1.0000 0.00948 106 106 0 0
3826 The rubber duck was your responsibility. 1.0000 0.00922 109 109 0 0
3827 You've made great strikes this week, you dirty, dirty boy. 1.0000 0.00897 112 112 0 0
3828 Rub a Dub Dub...how many voices in that tub?! 1.0000 0.01156 87 87 0 0
3829 sometimes when you feel your in hot water, you are 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
3830 That is correct, $300 per hour. Now take the soap. 1.0000 0.00913 110 110 0 0
3831 And where would this "Calgon" take you? 1.0000 0.00913 110 110 0 0
3832 You are making great strides with your aquaphobia complex!!! 1.0000 0.00985 102 102 0 0
3833 If I didn’t mean it that way I wouldn’t have used the word ‘literally.’ 1.0000 0.00930 108 108 0 0
3834 Next week we'll move on to your fear of snakes. 1.0000 0.00905 111 111 0 0
3835 I'm afraid you misunderstood what I meant by "immersion therapy." 1.0000 0.01307 77 77 0 0
3836 Achieving "shrinkage" is not quite what we're going for here. 1.0000 0.00913 110 110 0 0
3837 Mind if I join you? 1.0000 0.00873 115 115 0 0
3838 I feel like I’m swimming in my troubles, Doc. 1.0000 0.00913 110 110 0 0
3839 You're making wonderful progress. Next week I'll let you have a rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.00939 107 107 0 0
3840 You'll know our time is up when the water fully drains. 1.0000 0.01626 62 62 0 0
3841 You can't think of anything funny for this one, huh? Neither can I. 1.0000 0.01130 89 89 0 0
3842 What was it that you had to get off your chest? 1.0000 0.01869 54 54 0 0
3843 Let's get in touch with your inner child. 1.0000 0.01005 100 100 0 0
3844 I say "When up to your neck in hot water, make the most of it.". 1.0000 0.01005 100 100 0 0
3845 Tell me, why the sudden fixation on bubbles? 1.0000 0.01005 100 100 0 0
3846 I thought we agreed that your therapy has progressed beyond playing with the rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.01005 100 100 0 0
3847 Four hundred square feet of space in this room and they needed to install the claw-foot right in front of the window. 1.0000 0.00976 103 103 0 0
3848 You've heard of soap on a rope, well I'm from Sufa with a loofah 1.0000 0.00976 103 103 0 0
3849 Tell me about your time as an altar boy. 1.0000 0.00948 106 106 0 0
3850 No, there is no wrong way to rub you. 1.0000 0.01156 87 87 0 0
3851 "Don't worry, I have a degree in this". 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
3852 It's called rub-a-dub-dub therapy. 1.0000 0.00922 109 109 0 0
3853 I cannot cleanse you but you can cleanse yourself. 1.0000 0.00995 101 101 0 0
3854 Careful not to Freudian slip as you get out. 1.0000 0.00995 101 101 0 0
3855 It's a immersion therapy with a nice superficial scrub! 1.0000 0.00995 101 101 0 0
3856 Well, you should have looked up 'balneotherapy' prior to making your appointment. 1.0000 0.00966 104 104 0 0
3857 Scrub up first. Then we'll talk about your rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
3858 This will bring back childhood memories and possibly some from the Jacuzzi as well. 1.0000 0.00873 115 115 0 0
3859 New relaxing therapy? No, my couch is being reupholstered. 1.0000 0.01058 95 95 0 0
3860 It started with a hand washing compulsion... 1.0000 0.00995 101 101 0 0
3861 We're getting closer to finding your inner child. 1.0000 0.00784 128 128 0 0
3862 I'm having this reoccurring dream that I'm wetting the bed. 1.0000 0.00797 126 126 0 0
3863 Just remember, I had given up, recommended another therapist, and you still wanted to try this crap. It's your money.... 1.0000 0.00778 129 129 0 0
3864 And how does this make you feel, because, frankly, it's weirding me out a little bit. 1.0000 0.00816 123 123 0 0
3865 Doc, are you sure this is immersion therapy? 1.0000 0.00881 114 114 0 0
3866 Now that we got rid of your rubber ducky, let’s talk about your mother..... 1.0000 0.00772 130 130 0 0
3867 "Washing away your troubles" may sound trite, but for people with limited insurance coverage, or none, we find the once-a-month cleansing a viable alternative to semi-weekly "How do you feel about that?" therapy. 1.0000 0.00791 127 127 0 0
3868 The first class upgrade at Dave's therapist's office was well worth it. 1.0000 0.00810 124 124 0 0
3869 You don't seem to mind we're in yet another - cartoon! 1.0000 0.00810 124 124 0 0
3870 My apologies, the chaise-lounge is on bath-order 1.0000 0.00897 112 112 0 0
3871 My approach is to wash the unpleasant memories away. 1.0000 0.00784 128 128 0 0
3872 So your mother was a clean freak.... 1.0000 0.00784 128 128 0 0
3873 It's that sinking feeling I dread. 1.0000 0.00784 128 128 0 0
3874 Cleaning your conscience isn't covered by this plan. 1.0000 0.00784 128 128 0 0
3875 Today I'm going to prove to you that washing behind your ears will not make you sterile 1.0000 0.00784 128 128 0 0
3876 And these will deal with those impure thoughts 1.0000 0.00778 129 129 0 0
3877 Lithium salts. Why? 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
3878 Sometimes a bath is just a bath, ja? 1.0000 0.00913 110 110 0 0
3879 "I will furnish you with the tools to explore those hard to reach areas"! 1.0000 0.01361 74 74 0 0
3880 Ja, ve vill regress you. Da vater ist da same temperature as da womb. Den ve vill wash away all dose bad psychic problems, and dey go down da drain. Ja? 1.0000 0.00830 121 121 0 0
3881 As you can see, we try to make sure you so soak everything in. 1.0000 0.00830 121 121 0 0
3882 Some have accused me of brainwashing. 1.0000 0.00966 104 104 0 0
3883 Hey! Your mother made the appointment, and she told me just what to do. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
3884 This goes beyond my training, but for an extra 20 bucks, - I'll be happy to scrub your back. 1.0000 0.00889 113 113 0 0
3885 Did it sink in yet? 1.0000 0.00866 116 116 0 0
3886 I read about this in Goop. 1.0000 0.00866 116 116 0 0
3887 Hold these while I check to see if there's a rubber ducky in my desk drawer. 1.0000 0.00866 116 116 0 0
3888 I say it did make a sound. 1.0000 0.00803 125 125 0 0
3889 This has nothing to do with your depression, bipolar condition, schizophrenia or obsessive compulsion disorder - it's because you stink. 1.0000 0.00930 108 108 0 0
3890 I'm going to scrub your scrotum like it's 1939... . 1.0000 0.00563 178 178 0 0
3891 You need to relax while I scrub away the crazy. 1.0000 0.00858 117 117 0 0
3892 ...Now, I want you to visualize a rubber ducky... 1.0000 0.00816 123 123 0 0
3893 Five more minutes ! 1.0000 0.01105 91 91 0 0
3894 You will soon have an abnormally clean bill of health. 1.0000 0.01005 100 100 0 0
3895 I'll let you know as soon as I get the pictures of the ring. 1.0000 0.00851 118 118 0 0
3896 I call it Freudian soap therapy. 1.0000 0.00851 118 118 0 0
3897 Why would you bring up your mother at a time like this? 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
3898 Before we begin, cleanse your mind of any distractions. 1.0000 0.00830 121 121 0 0
3899 Have you ever had a Freudian Slip in a bathtub? 1.0000 0.00830 121 121 0 0
3900 A Freudian dip 1.0000 0.00858 117 117 0 0
3901 See? This is fun. You don't need that toaster. 1.0000 0.00612 164 164 0 0
3902 I now shall implement the 'I'm-gonna-wash-that-man-right-out-of-my-hair' therapy. 1.0000 0.00573 175 175 0 0
3903 Freud said it was Oedipus, but Jung says it's Epsom Salts. 1.0000 0.00687 146 146 0 0
3904 It's a new therapy - you wash away all your guilt." 1.0000 0.00323 310 310 0 0
3905 I want you totally relaxed before you see my bill. 1.0000 0.00311 322 322 0 0
3906 So, you feel like you are always in hot water...? 1.0000 0.00314 319 319 0 0
3907 I only resorted to this because you just would NOT come clean. 1.0000 0.00308 325 325 0 0
3908 It doesn't have to be a dirty little secret. 1.0000 0.00313 320 320 0 0
3909 So... this is all the treatment the experts of your insurance company approved. 1.0000 0.00313 320 320 0 0
3910 Your health plan provides for the soap and brush but it’s up to you. 1.0000 0.00311 322 322 0 0
3911 Don't forget to scrub behind your prefrontal cortex. 1.0000 0.00316 317 317 0 0
3912 You can expect shrinkage during the next 50 minutes. 1.0000 0.00349 287 287 0 0
3913 and what do you MEAN when you say you're in hot water 1.0000 0.00303 331 331 0 0
3914 When I saw an advertisement in the paper for a cleansing therapist, I didn't take it literally... 1.0000 0.00360 278 278 0 0
3915 Let's start by getting rid of those dirty thoughts 1.0000 0.00301 333 333 0 0
3916 Be careful when you get out not to Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.00298 336 336 0 0
3917 We agreed, Bob, that you would end the session with a clean conscience. 1.0000 0.00336 298 298 0 0
3918 No sailboat until you wash 1.0000 0.00312 321 321 0 0
3919 Of course I am a psychiatrist, but this pays the bills. 1.0000 0.00345 290 290 0 0
3920 Trust me, you’ll shrink faster in hot water. 1.0000 0.00284 352 352 0 0
3921 This isn't what I thought you meant by a "clean bill of health." 1.0000 0.00318 315 315 0 0
3922 So, you say your parents overused the expression "throw the baby out with the bathwater"? 1.0000 0.00358 280 280 0 0
3923 Will you tell me about your childhood if I get the rubber duckie? 1.0000 0.00319 314 314 0 0
3924 Of course some might label my therapy as brain washing. 1.0000 0.00326 307 307 0 0
3925 Doctor, I said I have agoraphobia not acqaphobia. 1.0000 0.00360 278 278 0 0
3926 Doc, I can't help but feel like I'm drowning. 1.0000 0.00354 283 283 0 0
3927 I still can't access the memory. Do you have any rubber ducks? 1.0000 0.00354 283 283 0 0
3928 First we clean the body, THEN we clean the mind. 1.0000 0.00350 286 286 0 0
3929 How long have you thought that you are a rubber duckie? 1.0000 0.00349 287 287 0 0
3930 Let's make a clean start. 1.0000 0.00348 288 288 0 0
3931 If this does not work the toaster is next. 1.0000 0.00345 290 290 0 0
3932 The rubber duck is busy today, maybe next session. 1.0000 0.00343 292 292 0 0
3933 Perhaps there's something you'd like to get off your chest? 1.0000 0.00412 243 243 0 0
3934 You should notice an abatement in your urge to wash your hands. 1.0000 0.00347 289 289 0 0
3935 here’s something to keep your hands busy. 1.0000 0.00334 300 300 0 0
3936 It's a metaphor. 1.0000 0.01258 80 80 0 0
3937 I have found that immersion therapy is most effective when used in conjunction with lather and exfoliation therapies. 1.0000 0.00332 302 302 0 0
3938 No problem a little soap and water won't cure. 1.0000 0.00331 303 303 0 0
3939 You're not aging too fast, you've just been sitting in the tub for too long. 1.0000 0.00319 314 314 0 0
3940 This session is about your phobias, not mine. Now, here, wash up before we begin. 1.0000 0.00323 310 310 0 0
3941 Sorry, there's just no way I can get the smell of 2017 off of you. 1.0000 0.00426 235 235 0 0
3942 Are we in hot water again? 1.0000 0.00315 318 318 0 0
3943 Congratulations. I'm giving you a clean bill of health. 1.0000 0.00282 355 355 0 0
3944 To get better, you really must come clean about everything. 1.0000 0.00315 318 318 0 0
3945 Tell me about your ducky. 1.0000 0.00274 365 365 0 0
3946 (Singing): And away goes trouble down the drain 1.0000 0.00281 356 356 0 0
3947 Sometimes a soap bar is just a soap bar. 1.0000 0.00260 385 385 0 0
3948 I didn't know why they called you a shrink, but then you started running the cold water. 1.0000 0.00253 396 396 0 0
3949 I think your lost yellow duckie is the least of your problems. 1.0000 0.00241 415 415 0 0
3950 It's time to discuss your dirty secrets 1.0000 0.00274 365 365 0 0
3951 For years I practiced psychoanalysis--now I prefer aloe-lavender soap. 1.0000 0.00280 358 358 0 0
3952 Since you’re already immersed in guilt, here’s a brush and some pumice to cleanse your sole. 1.0000 0.00277 362 362 0 0
3953 Rubber ducks are not covered by insurance. 1.0000 0.00257 390 390 0 0
3954 Come clean now or we move onto to total immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00255 393 393 0 0
3955 Now we are going to reach for the really dirty parts. 1.0000 0.00270 371 371 0 0
3956 Can you tell me now exactly what your parents did with the bath water? 1.0000 0.00225 444 444 0 0
3957 Shall we start off with a brainwash! 1.0000 0.00262 382 382 0 0
3958 No, going to a shrink does not get rid of belly fat. 1.0000 0.00227 442 442 0 0
3959 You sure this is immersion therapy? 1.0000 0.00223 449 449 0 0
3960 Curing sea-sickness takes time. It'll be a while before you're ready for open water 1.0000 0.00289 347 347 0 0
3961 Give me all your dirt. 1.0000 0.00210 476 476 0 0
3962 Maybe just let that sink in for a moment. 1.0000 0.00253 395 395 0 0
3963 We've got to get those dirty thoughts out of your system. 1.0000 0.00262 382 382 0 0
3964 And now, the Total Brain Cleanse, taking you back to Nov. 8, 2016. 1.0000 0.00499 201 201 0 0
3965 I am afraid sir that you are in a lot of hot water. 1.0000 0.00235 426 426 0 0
3966 Before we go further I must inform you, I bill by the gallon. 1.0000 0.00268 373 373 0 0
3967 Just relax and try to speak in a stream of consciousness. 1.0000 0.00294 341 341 0 0
3968 we'll Tim, I've found Himalayan salt scrubs to be just as effective as prozac. 1.0000 0.00321 312 312 0 0
3969 Doctor, I said I have agoraphobia not acqaphobia. 1.0000 0.00300 334 334 0 0
3970 Now try to remember what happened to your little ducky. 1.0000 0.00284 353 353 0 0
3971 Now you do me. 1.0000 0.00309 324 324 0 0
3972 I'm washed up, doc... 1.0000 0.00341 294 294 0 0
3973 It can get more awkward. 1.0000 0.00366 274 274 0 0
3974 Only the crazy Jungians use bubble bath. 1.0000 0.00286 350 350 0 0
3975 A clean conscience starts behind the ears. 1.0000 0.00355 282 282 0 0
3976 Remember, the soap's more scared of you than you are of it. 1.0000 0.00284 352 352 0 0
3977 Your tantrum damage to my office should be repaired this week. 1.0000 0.00234 427 427 0 0
3978 O.K., so you're in a tub of womb temperature pablum. Now let's begin with your early childhood. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
3979 This treatment is designed to cure Psycho-bathic Personality Disorder. 1.0000 0.00265 378 378 0 0
3980 Shout Hallelujah, come on, get happy, I'm gonna wash all your cares away! 1.0000 0.00284 352 352 0 0
3981 Are you ready for the second step of your immersion therapy? 1.0000 0.00274 366 366 0 0
3982 The brush and soap are free. The towel and the video will be $200. 1.0000 0.00303 330 330 0 0
3983 Would it surprise you that I'm also wildly overpriced? 1.0000 0.00291 344 344 0 0
3984 And what do you think you really mean when you say you want some privacy? 1.0000 0.00295 339 339 0 0
3985 You're perfectly sane. The only thing holding you back is body odor. 1.0000 0.00300 334 334 0 0
3986 You'll find it's a healthier alternative to licking yourself like a cat. 1.0000 0.00261 384 384 0 0
3987 I am not a germophobe, this just a precaution! 1.0000 0.00362 277 277 0 0
3988 I see you're a little steamed. Let's explore that. 1.0000 0.00375 267 267 0 0
3989 Well, as long as you feel like you are in hot water, let's try to look on this as an opportunity. 1.0000 0.00506 198 198 0 0
3990 Look buddy, I can only help you so much with your germaphobia. 1.0000 0.00506 198 198 0 0
3991 Let me scrub your nuts and we'll talk about whatever pops up. 1.0000 0.00506 198 198 0 0
3992 Admitting you're wet behind the ears is the first step. 1.0000 0.00499 201 201 0 0
3993 It was never about screaming - it’s “Primal Clean” therapy. 1.0000 0.00487 206 206 0 0
3994 Perhaps it’s time to explore some of your hidden parts. 1.0000 0.00548 183 183 0 0
3995 Cleansing thoughts. 1.0000 0.00484 207 207 0 0
3996 Don't forget to scrub behind your high school years. 1.0000 0.00482 208 208 0 0
3997 I've expanded my business model to include spa therapy. 1.0000 0.00473 212 212 0 0
3998 Most people bathe naked. Let's talk about your mother. 1.0000 0.00477 210 210 0 0
3999 ...and away go troubles down the drain. 1.0000 0.00727 138 138 0 0
4000 The New Yorker screwed up its damn caption contest again! 1.0000 0.00464 216 216 0 0
4001 "So why do you feel you're constantly getting into hot water? 1.0000 0.00473 212 212 0 0
4002 Furst ve clean ze outside an zen ve clean ze inside 1.0000 0.00462 217 217 0 0
4003 Boats would just keep you from focusing on the real problem, don't you think? 1.0000 0.01170 86 86 0 0
4004 You have to WANT to scrub. 1.0000 0.00612 164 164 0 0
4005 the soap breaks up and removes oil and dirt molecules, allowing the water to carry them away. the sponge removes dead or dying skin, leaving you smooth and fresh. the sponge's handle? no one knows. at least, that's the latest in Bath Theory 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4006 Let me be clear, I have no intention of soft-soaping you. 1.0000 0.00506 198 198 0 0
4007 Let's begin with a brain washing. 1.0000 0.00460 218 218 0 0
4008 Medicare covers the womb regression, but you're responsible for cleaning the ring. 1.0000 0.00489 205 205 0 0
4009 Before we begin, you may want to use this to wash away any illusions. 1.0000 0.00522 192 192 0 0
4010 And how does that make you feel?" "Wet. 1.0000 0.00651 154 154 0 0
4011 Do you ever have dreams about being naked in public? 1.0000 0.00651 154 154 0 0
4012 Relax, just let go of your inhibitions. Next week we'll try it with your clothes off. 1.0000 0.00557 180 180 0 0
4013 Take the Lava, Bradley, and wash your step-mother right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.00619 162 162 0 0
4014 Where would you like to start? 1.0000 0.01709 59 59 0 0
4015 First use these, then you can have the rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.00554 181 181 0 0
4016 It's important for you to come clean. 1.0000 0.00548 183 183 0 0
4017 Imagine yourself relaxing in a tub of hot water as I offer you a bar of soap and a brush. 1.0000 0.00707 142 142 0 0
4018 I scrub your back, Freud scrubs your mind. 1.0000 0.00536 187 187 0 0
4019 And when did you first realize your warm feelings towards rubber ducky? 1.0000 0.00536 187 187 0 0
4020 I'm just happy I found you as my therapist and not some quack! 1.0000 0.00536 187 187 0 0
4021 Take 3 more baths and call me in the morning. 1.0000 0.00545 184 184 0 0
4022 Let's now explore your TUB-conscious. 1.0000 0.00533 188 188 0 0
4023 The root of your issues is your problematic relationship with your father. Now let that soak in before you respond. 1.0000 0.00517 194 194 0 0
4024 OK, let's get to the bottom of this. 1.0000 0.00597 168 168 0 0
4025 Be careful when you get off, er, come out, I mean, leave, not to Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.00525 191 191 0 0
4026 I shouldn't judge but, yes, you are really dirty. 1.0000 0.00522 192 192 0 0
4027 I'm going to give you a minute to wash your mouth out with this soap, then you can continue with your dream about the First Lady. 1.0000 0.00519 193 193 0 0
4028 Tell me about your rubber duckie. 1.0000 0.00539 186 186 0 0
4029 I prefer to couch it a different way. 1.0000 0.00445 225 225 0 0
4030 If were going to continue this session you must come clean. 1.0000 0.00454 221 221 0 0
4031 I call it hydrocology; it encourages my patients to spill, cleanse, and drain. 1.0000 0.00471 213 213 0 0
4032 Well, yes, bubbles are extra...does that disappoint you? 1.0000 0.00387 259 259 0 0
4033 Now? We exfoliate. 1.0000 0.00372 269 269 0 0
4034 Let’s explore that part of you you’ve been ignoring. 1.0000 0.00385 260 260 0 0
4035 The couch is gone. Bed bug infestation. I'm not sure from who. Here, soap and a brush, now tell me about your mother. 1.0000 0.00458 219 219 0 0
4036 Now, about those dirty thoughts. 1.0000 0.00381 263 263 0 0
4037 I must say that I can't promise id will be washed off. 1.0000 0.00374 268 268 0 0
4038 Sometimes...it just feels like I'm drowning... 1.0000 0.00460 218 218 0 0
4039 Do you feel like we've given it enough time to soak in? 1.0000 0.00378 265 265 0 0
4040 This is a very vivid memory Mr. Bubble. What else can you recall? 1.0000 0.00378 265 265 0 0
4041 When you wake up, you'll feel like coming clean. 1.0000 0.00378 265 265 0 0
4042 You seem to be stewing on something. 1.0000 0.00371 270 270 0 0
4043 When you are finished with this regimen you will have a clean body, a clean mind and a clean wallet. 1.0000 0.00430 233 233 0 0
4044 We're going to wash that man right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.00370 271 271 0 0
4045 Well, we had a few complaints about the 50-minute shower. 1.0000 0.00367 273 273 0 0
4046 But enough with the navel gazing, let's address your fear of soap. 1.0000 0.00380 264 264 0 0
4047 Right, now we are going to wash that man right out of your hair! 1.0000 0.00391 256 256 0 0
4048 So will you finally admit you've landed in hot water... 1.0000 0.00396 253 253 0 0
4049 Now that we've cleansed your psyche, how about we get those tootsies? 1.0000 0.00419 239 239 0 0
4050 immersion therapy still requires some degree of work 1.0000 0.00398 252 252 0 0
4051 My one o'clock probably left these. Feel around for my two o'clock's wedding ring. 1.0000 0.00391 256 256 0 0
4052 I hear what you are saying, now it's time to exfoliate your thought process. 1.0000 0.00440 228 228 0 0
4053 Tell me about your water. 1.0000 0.00473 212 212 0 0
4054 Do YOU think your little ducky will come back? 1.0000 0.00438 229 229 0 0
4055 Time to come clean Mr. Rogers! 1.0000 0.00428 234 234 0 0
4056 Tell me more about your loofah. 1.0000 0.00570 176 176 0 0
4057 But your mind will always be dirty. 1.0000 0.00536 187 187 0 0
4058 Now, describe your earliest loofa experience... 1.0000 0.00548 183 183 0 0
4059 Trust me. It's an extremely effective form of immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.00460 218 218 0 0
4060 You can have your rubber ducky after you tell me about your father. 1.0000 0.00438 229 229 0 0
4061 This is a twofer: it'll scratch both your id AND my libido. 1.0000 0.00460 218 218 0 0
4062 How long have you had this fear of dirt? 1.0000 0.00449 223 223 0 0
4063 Thanks for letting me have my office in your bathroom... 1.0000 0.00414 242 242 0 0
4064 I call this stage "Aquasition". 1.0000 0.00542 185 185 0 0
4065 Just to warn you: the soap is in-network, but the back scrubber bills as an independent contractor. 1.0000 0.00473 212 212 0 0
4066 This week we're going to really clean out that subconscious. 1.0000 0.00473 212 212 0 0
4067 By the way, your insurance definitely doesn't cover this. 1.0000 0.00501 200 200 0 0
4068 And how does it make you feel that the butcher and the baker decided to get their own tubs? 1.0000 0.00401 250 250 0 0
4069 Yes , but Bubbles are extra. 1.0000 0.00423 237 237 0 0
4070 Let's recreate the origin of your trauma. But please understand your policy won't cover the towel. 1.0000 0.00639 157 157 0 0
4071 Are you serious? You must be color-blind. 1.0000 0.04880 21 21 0 0
4072 Now lets act out 'rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
4073 Frankly my dear, I don't want to make a dam. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4074 Sometimes a back brush is only a back brush. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4075 Use the pumice and brush, then tell me again how your mom used to make you feel when you’d come home dirty and smelly after practice. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4076 I know this is not what you expected when I suggested immersion therapy, but this technique is going to let your deepest and innermost feelings float right up to the surface. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4077 It's this or 20 years of Talk Therapy. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4078 Don't think of this as a watered-down therapy session. Think of it as swim or sink in ideas. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4079 What makes you think I'm trying to brainwash you? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
4080 Apparently Freud used a loofah but often they slip. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4081 I will wash your mouth out with soap for saying that! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4082 As a doctor I implore you---I cannot simply scrub away your mommy issues. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4083 you’ll feel better once you’re come clean 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4084 Where, exactly, are we going with this? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4085 After you finish with the loofah, I will go get the harpoon for the soul-cleansing ritual. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
4086 Mr. Weinstein, I'm here to discuss your exhibitionism 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4087 Hmmm didn’t know there was this much hot water left in DC. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4088 If you shrink in there, I’ve earned my nickname. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4089 I’m sorry. Your health insurance coverage does not include soap. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4090 Sorry, in this bathtub dream you've inserted me into, I do what with the brush? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
4091 Of course I'm soaking you. Why else would I have all the diplomas? 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
4092 New wave therapy. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
4093 A Valium, or a rubber ducky. That is the question. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4094 You know my version of this exchange will differ from yours? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4095 You said if I would provide this you would open up! 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4096 You should try my recipe for log jam. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4097 Do I see lipstick is on those gnaw marks! 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4098 Whoa, that's my dam tree! 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4099 Not only are you going to build it, but you're going to pay for it too. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4100 We don't need another stick at home. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4101 Just remember when we are finishe that bath therapy is double my regular fee. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4102 I wanted reclaimed wood, not new wood! 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4103 Being in hot water doesn't have to feel so bad. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4104 Here, these will help you wash your troubles away. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4105 You'll feel quite dirty after we've discussed your Oedipus Complex. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4106 Its oatmeal with a little butter. Tasty? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4107 What did you THINK Rub-a-Dub-Dub Therapy was going to be? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4108 Okay, now say whatever comes to mind. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4109 Think what you want, but there is a lot of value in literally cleansing one’s conscience. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
4110 Let’s really scrub your inner child. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4111 Let's start with your earliest childhood memories. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4112 I thought up this therapy while watching a Calgon commercial. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
4113 The neurosis takes the flavor up to a higher plane 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4114 that just can't be sustainably harvested 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4115 The national Association of Dental hygienists say bark is good for you. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4116 It's much more complicated than just cleaning up the image you know. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4117 Hmm, did I tell you that I never change the water between the sessions? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4118 Does your insurance cover bubbles? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4119 OK, it is ineffective, but at least you're getting clean 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4120 Wherever I go I feel I'm being pelted with mud 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4121 Let me hold onto these. I don’t want you slipping on them either. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4122 C'mon! Are you going to help me, or do I have to do this alone? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4123 It's okay to cry. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4124 Let me know when you've reaccessed your earliest memory of being in hot water. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4125 Dan, I believe I've said all along that we'd be cleansing all aspects. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4126 It'a the latest hip thing from Portland. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4127 Now ask yourself, what is that I really need to have here -- the soap or the brush! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4128 The brush is telling the soap that you are getting very dangerously tired. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4129 Are your relationships with other people cold, tepid, or steamy? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4130 Deforestation, loss of habitat, co2 emissions, global footprint... Do you think about future generations when you DO stuff like THAT? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4131 So you’re basically defining me as a “ hot mess”? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4132 Cleanliness is next to Freudliness. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4133 Blather, wince, retreat. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4134 Pace yourself, remember that we're paid by the hour. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4135 Society expects order, cleanliness, and beauty. Which shall we analyze first? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4136 Spa therapy, not therapy spa, has facials 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4137 Sorry, but this isn't a substitute to flossing. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4138 Give me that damn tree branch ! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4139 Dam dam dam dam dam dam dammmmmmm, asshole. 1.0000 0.05717 18 18 0 0
4140 I'll trade you for 10 seedlings." 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4141 It's rodents like you that are causing climate change. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4142 We haven't decided how to litigate on it. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4143 You bet jurassic ichthyosaurs are good artists! 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4144 ....Next session we will continue with our aggressive therapy: rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4145 I want this to be a space for you to let off some steam. 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4146 Sure, we could try something other than cold water but your therapy would take longer. 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4147 I just got back from a convention for Emotionally Focused Therapeutics 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4148 No, the Rub A Dub Dub Three Men in a Tub therapy is passe! 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4149 How does that temperature make you feel? 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4150 I’m going to make you chew a whole crate of branches. 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4151 Dam it! 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4152 If I'm one of them, I don't want to be the one who dies. 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4153 You don’t seem rotund, why do they call you ‘Tubby’? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4154 I've switched from using toasters . . . . 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4155 Don't worry, it's still a therapeutic hour. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4156 Trust me, shrinkage therapy is the only effective treatment for narcissistic exhibitionists. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4157 So we agree it's time to stop stewing in your own juices? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4158 This isn't what I meant when I said you need a cleanse" 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4159 We have discussed this before, a ducky would be a distraction. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4160 You need to come clean. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4161 Now, just let that stew a bit. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4162 now, let,s brush up on your problem 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4163 Are you sure this is how to make a Clean Start? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4164 Danny, if you'll tell me about your mother I'll scrub your back again. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4165 Sometimes a scrub brush is only a scrub brush 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4166 In this session, we will cleanse the sins of a dirty mind. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4167 You keep dreaming your naked in public. Tell me more about that. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4168 Let me give your ego a scrub! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4169 After a hot bath, milk and cookies, you will feel much better, young man. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4170 Rub - a - dub - dub three men in a tub, which one are you today? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4171 I'm a firm believer in 'cleanse the body, cleanse the soul'." 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4172 I will scrub your back as you free associate. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4173 But if you had to choose one, which would it be? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4174 Thank you, Doctor. This role-reversal suggestion is really helping. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4175 It's the same temperature as last week! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4176 Now remember to dry off completely to avoid another Freudian slip as you leave the tub. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4177 I put all of my patients through climate change therapy. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4178 I call it hydrotherapy. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4179 Your womb fixation would end if you took showers instead. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4180 We'll now begin the additional therapy for this whole situation. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4181 Once again the butcher and the baker are no-shows. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4182 Let's wash that thought right out of your head. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4183 Some memories can be scrubbed but others are indelibly etched. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4184 My other new therapy is dancing to Taylor Swift's "Shake It Off." 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4185 Tell me about your loofah. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4186 Well, that's our time. Let's circle back next week. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4187 After identifying the "ego" and the "super-ego," Freud tried in vain to substantiate the existence of a "wet-ego." 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4188 Trust me. 5 minutes in my magic growing bath potion, and your teeth will be the right size for this toothbrush! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4189 Well Doc, if I can't sling it... 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4190 Why can’t he roll on Shabbos? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4191 Next, we’ll just scrub out those anxieties. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4192 Now you're in hot water. A little scrubbing can take care of most of the dirt, but at some point you'll have to come clean on the couch. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4193 It's called brainwashing. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4194 We need to scrub-a-dub-dub your phobias away! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4195 I want you to think back. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4196 This should help to get rid of all that Washington dirt. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4197 Now. Open your mind. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4198 I believe you really need to relax first and just let it all soak in. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4199 Hold the soap. I just like feeling that I'm back in the womb. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4200 Damn it, Carl! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4201 Hey, you gonna finish that? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4202 Herold we agreed no more take out! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4203 No, I said you don’t give a damn. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4204 It is NOT organic! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4205 You Millenials and your BRANCHES…! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4206 Hydrotherapy 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4207 You were supposed to get the short end of the stick. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4208 Didn't I tell you 'coal is the future'? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4209 With you it's one dam thing after another. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4210 Why are you so stuck in the past? We're using cement for the dams nowadays. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4211 Just one word...toothpaste. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4212 Next time a really straight one. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4213 Yes. Definitely. Cultural appropriation, for sure. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4214 We”ll get blamed for this 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4215 Don't feel too badly. Everyone has some dirt on them. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4216 I'm paying $450. You wash my back. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4217 We'll I'll be damned! I never thought you'd go out on a limb! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4218 Hey that’s pine...you know pine makes me gassy! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4219 Your doctor said to cut down "ON" your fiber, not to cut "DOWN" your fiber. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4220 Dammit. You do this every time I start yelling. Why? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4221 Doctor, what does this have to do with my childhood? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4222 Enough with the fiber, I'm getting takeout. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4223 When Sigmund treated the blues. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4224 I've included a tub mat to avoid any Freudian slips. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4225 We’ve got 50 minutes to get to the bottom of it. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4226 When did you first realize you weren’t a fish? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4227 Are you ready to cleanse your soul? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4228 You need therapy, Mr. Weinstein. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4229 Now do you understand where the bubbles come from? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4230 So when did you first feel that you were a rubber duck? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4231 So, how long have you been having these wet dreams? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4232 You are feeling soapy . . . 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4233 Okay, Hollywood, now it's time to clean up your act. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4234 What we're looking for here, is your inner rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4235 Do you know if those come in jalapeño? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4236 ...yes, the couch does seem to be less trouble, but with this new bath therapy I feel we can make a real breakthrough on your overwhelming feeling of rejection by others... 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4237 No, it wasn't a part of my Ph.D studies, I learned this from an Instagram Influencer. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4238 Now, let's try going back. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4239 It's my immersion and relaxation therapy combo. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4240 When my psychiatrist recommended I needed to take a hot bath, I never knew he would watch me take it! It got awkward. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4241 Now do you get why my catch phrase is 'whatever floats your boat'? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4242 Now, take the soap and brush and scrub away your neurosis. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4243 Now we can boil down to the root of your issues 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4244 If you're done sobbing, perhaps we can explore the drowning sensation you mentioned. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4245 Yup. You really are in hot water when you told your wife how she really looked in that dress. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4246 I BELIEVE WORKING FROM THE OUTSIDE IN 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4247 Relax in the soothing warm water. Next I'll use some herbal soap and the back-scrubbing brush. It may tickle, a bit. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4248 I forgot to tell you that Obamacare does not cover the hydrotherapy part of our sessions. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4249 Let’s start with a clean slate, shall we? First the body then the mind. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4250 You need to stop stewing about this. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4251 You're agnawying me now. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4252 NO MORE DIRTY THOUGHTS! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4253 Remember, you will be done in an hour, so talk quickly. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4254 I know it's hard, but you need to begin the cleansing process. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4255 That’s cloth ears explained, now let’s wash out your mouth with soap. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4256 It's not the right wood Chuck. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4257 I said the red oak, not red maple. Do I have to do everything myself?! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4258 You’re a Dam fool. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4259 Give me the wood chunk! My health insurance is too expensive and I can’t afford a nice dentist! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4260 I am your soap therapist; first we'll use the lavender to encourage inner peace and tranquility. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4261 Extinct?? Looks like they just evolved! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4262 Get your mind out of the gutter and share your clean thoughts. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4263 One of my patients said the chair was uncomfortable. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4264 Trust me. Dr Fraud will scrub away your lingering neuroses, and you will be left with no new traumatic issues. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4265 Patient: So where were you practicing before this? Therapist: Prison Patient: Oh!! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4266 Now, we can start dealing with your Germophobia? 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4267 Between patients, I'm working on my therapeutic soap formula. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4268 Freud is out and spas are in! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4269 I find this scrub a dub approach particularly effective in washing away your blues as well as opening up the door to drowning your sorrows. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4270 This wasn't exactly what I was thinking when I said, "Make yourself comfortable." 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4271 Please, Mr. Jenkins -- immersive hypnotherapy is not "brainwashing." 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4272 And doctor what is the recommended technique following immersion therapy? 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4273 I thought we could try a little immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4274 Now I will clean out every crevice of your psyche... literally. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4275 Yes Harvey, I understand it's not the same as a shower 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4276 Would Frankenstein feel more like himself if his bolts were scrubbed? 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4277 No, I do not think this is a solution to your bed-wetting problem. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4278 I'm glad you've finally decided to come clean about certain things. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4279 Womb or Tomb?? The choice is yours! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4280 "Wash away your sins"? Can I first go change into a different costume? 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4281 Loofah or disambiguation, your choice 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4282 What are we busy as? 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4283 Well, I don't give a dam. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4284 She's in her Palaeolithic Period. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4285 It just reflects the prices 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4286 A warm oatmeal bath helps release the inner child... 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4287 I can provide you with the tools, but you have to be willing to do the work 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4288 You scrub my back and then I'll scrub yours. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4289 This form of hydrotherapy is not pleasant, but you will feel better afterwards. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4290 Today we address your displacement issues 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4291 It’s an elephant toothbrush, but you can use it for your OCD. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4292 You need to make a clean break with the past. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4293 It's no-aroma therapy. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4294 That’s it!—no more fear of bathing. Now we shall work on your fear of death. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4295 The research indicates this is a very effective way to brainwash. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4296 In our last session I clearly suggested that you come clean. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4297 As your psychiatrist, I make no judgments, but someone with such a filthy mind just HAS to have a filthy body too. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4298 Jerome was having second thoughts about Immersion Therapy. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4299 I’m known for giving my patients a clean slate. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4300 Losing everything doesn't mean you're all washed up. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4301 A Freudian dip 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4302 Now, tell me again about the "ducky." 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4303 No, it won't wash the politics from your soul, but you've got to start somewhere. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4304 Let's try to focus on what's beneath the surface. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4305 I don't see why you're upset. You're the one who said you wanted to get clean. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4306 Not really, no. But your skin will feel much better. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
4307 What's your deepest thought? 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4308 You're my first patient. I was a plumber before I obtained my therapy license. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4309 You've chewed off more than you can bite. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4310 You have a dirty mind. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4311 Hey you got something stuck in your teeth. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4312 It started out to be metaphorical and turned into a ritual. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
4313 I will now show the difference between being dirty and feeling dirty 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
4314 Mr. Rubber Ducky is tired of your whining, Bob. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4315 I guess that ‘bathe in his presence’ review could have been taken literally. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
4316 You're a lousy woodchuck, Phil, but a spectacular groundhog. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
4317 This is going to take us weeks, and nobody gives a dam! 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
4318 I said dammit, not dam it" 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
4319 You're in hot water so come clean. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4320 Maybe we should scrub this session! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4321 It’s time for scrubbing therapy! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4322 How have you been steeping? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4323 Today we'll proceed without the rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4324 You really need to start flossing. 1.0000 0.04082 25 25 0 0
4325 Since you're already in hot water we might as well get you clean. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4326 Don’t worry, I got your back, you can drown your sorrows here. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4327 If this is going to work, you have to let me in. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4328 Let's concentrate on your childehood memories. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4329 The symbolism of "wash your cares away," is greatly enhanced with soap and a back brush. You can take a swing at me too if you want to.... 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4330 Time's up! We'll have to complete the scrubbing of your memories next time. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4331 How long have you had this sinking feeling? 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
4332 I can’t find your rubber ducky FOR you. You have to find it within yourself. 1.0000 0.04446 23 23 0 0
4333 Scrubbing away your demons sometimes refers to your exterior 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4334 I thought we might start with coming clean with your past. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4335 I feel like my life's going down the drain... 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
4336 when I finish counting to ten you will fall asleep, but wake up if you think you're drowning 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4337 Please wake up so I can hypnotize you to embrace soap scrubs. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4338 I don't know. What does the rubber duckie signify to you? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4339 And now its time to scrub away your sins.You want me to do it or you do it? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4340 Our sessions got to be too dry and dirty. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4341 Cleansing of the soul?! Hogwash!! 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4342 With dreams like that...let's switch places! 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4343 I'm happy you stayed a traditionalist. One of my new patients asked for bubbles! 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4344 At what age did you begin to enjoy having your mother wash out your mouth with soap? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4345 For our next session, I should probably brush up on some of those mysophobia treatment techniques. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4346 Tell me about your imaginary rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4347 I wondered what was behind all the hype for a lizard-free diet. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4348 Ugh! Tastes like chicken! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4349 Dr. Freud always holds the soap so the patient doesn't have a slip. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4350 I'm in hot water, doc. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4351 I have asked you not to bring your work home. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4352 That's my toothbrush. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4353 Hey, I asked how much? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4354 We’re not playing fetch you idiot. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4355 You're doing the Paleo Diet wrong. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4356 I was skeptical too, but now I prefer my water pic to saplings. Better results and EPA approved. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4357 A high fiber diet can get boring 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4358 I told you I'd do it, so drop that dam tree right now! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4359 Do you think we should get his work before the galleries discover him? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4360 ...and we finished this dam three days ago - but I guess you've been too "busy" again to notice." 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4361 I know it's vegan, but is it gluten free? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4362 You should also floss. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4363 Dam it, Chewy, that piece would ruin our shore appeal. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4364 I gnawed it first! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4365 I told you I didn't want takeout tonight!!! 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4366 You better be going somewhere with this. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
4367 Okay, I know -- $200 an hour. But I still have my limits. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4368 To alleviate anxieties, we no longer call it a bomb. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4369 Now then, let's just wash that man right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4370 Just let that sink in. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4371 Do you feel guilty about being in hot water? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4372 Hypnotherapy? No, your insurance only covers hydrotherapy. You want bubbles with that? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4373 Tell me about your mothership... 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4374 Scrub the first thing that comes to mind. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4375 This is not exactly what I meant when I said to clean up your act. But, let's give it a whirl. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4376 Repetio, no pago por este muro!! [translation: I'm not paying for this wall!!] 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4377 I told you I wanted oak, not pine. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4378 Normally we utilize a more metaphorical approach, but your check bounced. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4379 You must have sawdust in your ears. I said you should stop and pick up a "treat" on the way home. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4380 Drop it! You're under arrest. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4381 On behalf of the homeowners' association, I'd like to have a word with you. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4382 I thought we were going on a diet together! NOTE: My brother described a different drawing to me. If it's the bathtub one, then I'm submitting "Are you still having dirty thoughts?" 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4383 I like to take an "outside in" approach. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4384 Two years in the tub and your id still reeks. Now I want to see you scrub! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4385 Couldn't you just take a shower? 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4386 It's the latest therapy technique - Psycho-Exfoliation. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4387 You see, it is very simple. Take this soap in your teeth, and brush yourself 'down there.' 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4388 To really reach beneath the surface is going to take some courage. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4389 I'm starting to see why you keep dreaming of drowning. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4390 Clean body Clean mind 1.0000 0.06063 17 17 0 0
4391 Psychoanalysis involves more than simple relaxation. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4392 Those damned spots are so hard to get out nowadays. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4393 Unorthodox - sure. But the benefits of being clean behind the ears is underappreciated. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4394 Now for the final phase, I'll open the blinds, so passerbys may watch you scrub your anxieties away. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4395 When we left off last week, you were frustrated at how I renovated our bathroom. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4396 Rub a dub dub, one man in a tub! 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4397 Do you ever get a sinking feeling? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4398 Advanced psychotherapy has shown that after a hot tub and a back scrub, you'll open up like a gutted rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4399 I charge $100 an hour - a full body scrub and laundry is extra! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4400 I can't help you unless you come clean with me. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4401 First was immersion therapy, next is submersion therapy. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4402 So, what makes you think you're on a couch? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4403 The couch thing was getting old... 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4404 So sir how does the boiling hot water make you feel? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4405 Now, imagine scrubbing your mind of all that's happened in the last year. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4406 OK, now before we start today... get rid of all those unclean thoughts, take a deep breath, and if a piranha bites you today, we waive your Co-Pay. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4407 Talk therapy is so over. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4408 “For our next session, we will try hot water”. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4409 Yes, I am licensed to practice submersion therapy. Why do you ask? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4410 Once we work through my issues, then we'll get to yours. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4411 You can come clean with me. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4412 Due to his previous existing condition, John was in a pool of his own. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4413 Now clean your body..I mean clear your mind. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4414 Trust me. I have a degree in Rub-A-Dub-Dub from Scrub University. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4415 Difficult - yes, but we are going to open this session sans duck. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4416 I'm providing you with the tools you need to help yourself. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4417 Now, let's clean up those your wet dreams you've been having. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4418 To hell with the Freud's talking cure! 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
4419 Your wife dropped these off this morning. She says that you have too many hard edges. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4420 Now try and remember how you felt when you drowned your rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4421 Does this come close to the womb experience? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4422 Donald Trump is a jackass. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4423 Not until you explain what the brush signifies. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4424 You better not have lost your retainer again 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
4425 Mind your own dam business. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4426 Can I borrow a toothpick? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4427 We don't need another tower. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4428 All I said was that he was cave trained. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4429 But you can, you can, wash that man right out of your hair! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
4430 Rub-a-dub-dub. One man in a tub. And what issues do you think there are? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4431 I don’t want ‘the branch’—I need you to LISTEN. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
4432 The new therapy helps cleanse the mind. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4433 When I said 'How do you feel about that?' I wasn't asking about your hands. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4434 Next we try the autoclave. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4435 You know, Doc, your gravy-soak therapy is just not cutting it for me. I still hate Thanksgiving. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4436 let's discuss your recurring dream about a bearded stranger trying to scrub your back. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4437 If this doesn't work, we can always try shock therapy. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4438 And how did the loofah make you feel? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4439 So you want me to wash your back or what? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4440 Colin awoke to find the bath salts had not cured his fear of doctors. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
4441 As you see, we've determined that your problems are only skin deep. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4442 There's an extra charge if I bathe you. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4443 I see that you are in hot water again! 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
4444 Floss. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4445 If you're ever going to become emotionally close to a partner, we have to start by addressing why they may avoid becoming physically close 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4446 Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4447 I'm usually not an enabler... 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4448 Imagine, for a moment, that I'm your mother. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4449 Rub-a-dub-dub. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4450 So Mr. Weinstein, close your eyes and try to pretend I am a vulnerable starlet while I scrub your back. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
4451 Sorry, but the rubber ducky is out of the question. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4452 I usually recommend the "Subconscious Spill" bath bomb 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4453 I'm sensing you may need to loofah. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4454 Today we're going to discuss how sometimes a bath is just a bath. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4455 Another dam? You're such a stick-in-the-mud. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4456 Put that down! The divorce lawyer said I keep the den. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4457 That's mine ! I gnawed it first ! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4458 I’ve had enough of your dam hijinks. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4459 You really should get into software engineering. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4460 Dam it, Janet! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4461 Fine - now get some concrete and let's build a real dam! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4462 Dam it. I wanted flowers this time. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4463 Stop carrying that dam thing around everywhere you go! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4464 Dam you Chuck. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4465 another GRAFFITIAN dinosaur 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4466 What say we scrub away all that guilt? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4467 You made great progress today by coming clean on how you feel. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4468 Or perhaps you'd prefer a bubble bath? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4469 This is going to be the best part. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4470 Enough with dreamwork, the mud is your Unconscious! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4471 I loofa you 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4472 Please, just let me have a toaster! 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4473 We've had some funding cut recently on our hydrotherapy practice. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4474 How does it feel to stew in your own juices? 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4475 I tried scented oils and complimentary herbal tea in the waiting room. But the therapist across the street just started handing out plush blanket robes. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4476 "It's just a little thing of mine before we start your OCD therapy. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4477 I counter intuitively work from the outside in. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4478 I think you've taken this anal thing far enough. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4479 I like big tubs and I cannot lie 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4480 We will ignore your ID and EGO while I hand you the soap and brush. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4481 The more perfect a person is on the outside, the more demons they have on the inside. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4482 Now tell me more about your friends, the baker and the candlestick maker. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4483 Welcome to step one of your hazing for board certification, Dr. Bortz. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4484 If you scrub yourself hard enough, you'll let go of your laundering guilt. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4485 I'm helping you to cleanse the airwaves. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4486 Shout "Eureka!" Insights will follow. It's reverse psychology. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4487 I find that the loofah is essential for dealing with repressed memories. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4488 And what happened when you lost your rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4489 It's just water. Your health plan doesn't cover chicken soup. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4490 Now I regret not shelling out a few extra dollars to get to the real Baden Baden. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4491 Now tell me whatever floats your boat. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4492 Scrub a dub dub. OCD in a tub. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4493 We call this 'being taken to the cleaners.' How does it feel? 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4494 You can use my soap and brush if I can use the water after you. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4495 What do YOU think they meant by "an offer you can't refuse"? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4496 I don't know about sin but we can wash away dirt. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
4497 You said to make myself comfortable! 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4498 Being buried in sand may bring back your scary childhood ! 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4499 Metaphor Fail. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4500 Since aromatherapy didn't work . . . 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4501 Just sit and soak and let me cleanse your mind and brush you up on the facts of your current situation. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4502 I would say at least 25 more sessions until you wash away that vote. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4503 You looked stressed, so I scrubbed you up a bath 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4504 You didn't actually think I'd come to your house to cure you of your fear of bathing? 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4505 No, you're not my only client who complains that he's "always in hot water." 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4506 And since Rubber Ducky left you, how do you feel? 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4507 It might help you if you come clean. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4508 it's water therapy and a nap. Can't miss! 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4509 They say it lets off a little steam. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4510 I would if we went toe to head. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4511 This is our total immersion therapy. For an extra $100. you get your back washed and rubbed. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4512 I've heard of Freudian and Jungian but never Rub-A-Dub-Dub Therapy. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4513 A warm bath should do it. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4514 Once more, you've bitten off more than you can chew! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4515 It's hypnotizing. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4516 Stop being so dam eager 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4517 Drop my dam stick. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4518 He who gnaws he gnaws not is asking for it 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4519 So, how long have you been having these wet dreams? 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
4520 I think we can flip it. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4521 Scarlet, I’m not helping. I don’t give a Damn 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4522 You’re leaving me; you’re not taking our home. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4523 I bet I can make you laugh. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4524 You're missing the forest for the trees. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4525 Sigmund Freud will probably want to sign this. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4526 Your mother told me to remind you to wash behind your ears. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4527 Soon your deepest fears will bubble to the surface, then we can scrub them away. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4528 The point of hydrotherapy is to heal, not exfoliate. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4529 Trust me on this. It's a clean body, clean mind thing. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4530 Are you still dreaming of leading a revolution, Mr Marat? 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4531 You say you feel like a beached whale. Listen to me, Jonah; you’re not washed up. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4532 You're soaking in it 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4533 Of course it made noise and don't call me Wally. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4534 I understand you were a cabinet member. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4535 Quit building levees and get to work. Dam it! 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
4536 These home therapy sessions don't include exfoliation. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4537 Your problem is you're just not eager enough 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4538 We shall be using the primal steam method to get to the root of your problems. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4539 Your continuous gnawing is keeping me awake. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4540 When he learns how to sign his name, we're finished. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4541 Just back with some Wellfleet water - let's give this new scrub therapy a whirl 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4542 It's called 'wash, shrink, repeat.' 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4543 Alright, let's scrub away all memories of your ex wife. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
4544 we will get you out of your fear of drowning: just think that the brush is your body against the rocks and the soap a shark circling your head. This should keep you away from the sea 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4545 You're about to become a believer in mind body connections. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4546 I thought you inquired about "wash fulfillment." 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4547 In times like these, a deep wash is recommended. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4548 True or false, 'cleanliness is next to godliness.' 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4549 Next we will work on your thoughts 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4550 Self determinism recognizes one's need to make one's own choices. And so I repeat, luffa or brush? 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
4551 And does the subject of bubbly scrubdowns make you uncomfortable? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4552 Our basic loofa talk therapy doesn’ Include hot stones. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4553 And does this also remind you of your mother? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4554 I know you are aware that this is where we have been heading for all these years. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4555 And now you feel ready to come clean? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
4556 Two hundred more of those and you earn your 'Busy Beaver" badge. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4557 Damn you. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4558 You're going to get a virus if you keep trying to log on without a password. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4559 Only you can stop deforestation 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4560 Wake up, matey A wee scrubbing and you'll be ready for our next treatment. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4561 I call it "therapy for the great unwashed." 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4562 We are working through lunch today. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4563 Unfortunately this won't help with your dirty thoughts. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4564 ‘Splash splash I was taking a bath.’ Thanks, Jerry. I can cross singing, a therapy session in the bathtub, and you bathing me dressed as a therapist off my NY bucket list. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4565 An example of how my wife just doesn't listen to me? Well, I recently asked her to make me an appointment with her dental hygeniest, and I wind up at a mental hygeniest. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4566 I'm submerged in thought. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4567 7 out of 10 New York Phychiatrists prefer BLAZO soap and brush to any other brand. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4568 No, you won't find this therapy in my new book. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4569 "Repeat after me, it rubs the lotion on or else it get the wire brush and lye soap again"! 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4570 You're caught with damning evidence! 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4571 I thought we agreed, no clear cutting! 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4572 Something tells me you are not wearing your retainer. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4573 Not in my backyard. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4574 I've told you and told you, "Measure twice, cut one." But do you listen? No! 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4575 Dam it, Charles! That's far too large to be used as a toothpick. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4576 Is that the legislative, judicial, or executive branch that you're chewing on? 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4577 How many times have I told you to be careful with your veneers? 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4578 Flooding is an effective cure for a number of phobias. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4579 So you perpetually have the feeling that you're in hot water? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4580 Tell me about a time you felt naked and vulnerable. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4581 In your case, its not really symbolic 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4582 This is our new hydro-hypno therapy. You are getting clean, clean, very clean. Watch the scrubby brush. Cleaner, cleaner, very clean. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4583 How does it make you feel when you hear the words, "rub-a-dub-dub?" 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4584 My colleagues are all talking about mental hygiene. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4585 Don't come to a shrink if you can't handle the shrinkage. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4586 Next week we try the cold shower and soup therapy. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4587 You have finally moved past the rubber duckie phase to the scrub behind the ears phase. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4588 Usually, the first step is acknowledging that you're in a lot a hot water. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4589 OK, so now, tell me all about your rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4590 Ha... and you thought I was going to brainwash you. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4591 The Bastard thinks he's my super ego! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4592 "THIS took 3 days?? Eager you're all done at Dam Right, Inc. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4593 Now duck your head under and we can clean up your hard drive. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4594 Am I supposed to feel anything swimming around? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4595 I assure you that our sessions here are strictly confidential. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4596 Did you say aloof or a loofa? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4597 At some point, you might realize the necessity to apply yourself with the tools you have at hand before sinking any lower. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4598 Looks like your work in the White House calls for more your Valium prescription. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4599 Excellent! One more time- 'I'm gonna wash that crazy, alcoholic, verbally abusive Dad right out of my...' 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4600 They never told me waterboarding would be this easy. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4601 You can't do that! We're in a shoreline protection zone! 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4602 Did he have to make us look so . . . primitive? 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
4603 There's not a damn thing you can do about it 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4604 They hired us as the replacement team for “Fixer Upper,” and damn I do love Demo Day! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4605 If you'd just stop building a dam wall between us & listen. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4606 I hope you don't think that's going to get you back into the dam tonight. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4607 Next anniversary you better fetch me some bling! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4608 Very romantic, Wilbur. Happy Valentine's Day, my foot 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4609 If I leave it to you, nothing ever gets done! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4610 And you call that eager? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4611 That eager beaver thing you are doing is making us all look bad. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4612 Nelson, we need to speak, I'm from the Branch Office 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4613 Burning Man is so tight. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4614 She refused to settle with Miramax 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4615 Right, this hot bath costs you $100 per hour, soap and brush included. 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4616 Jimmy, it's time to clean up your womb. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
4617 There are no "dirty" thoughts and desires here, James. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
4618 Now scrub away this silly layer of guilt. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
4619 You've added your own substantial new wrinkle from my new couch 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
4620 It's all to help you come clean. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4621 You begin analysis as broth but by your third visit you're stew. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4622 Don't forget to scrub behind your Oedipus Complex. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4623 I'll give you the soap when you give me the dirt. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4624 Alright, shall we dive in? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4625 Think of this as a watershed moment. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4626 Would you prefer a shower? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4627 You have seven more sessions before the Super Bowl, if you still intend to join the office pool. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4628 I expect all my patients to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4629 Got room for another? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4630 Be careful not to Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4631 Well doc, it all started when my mother chose water birth. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4632 Mind and body are more strongly connected than we used to think 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4633 I don't think we have time to wash your feet this week. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4634 Their is another downside - can't use the tub again. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4635 It's important to know when you started to hate your mother during bath time. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4636 Damn you, stop eating the dam wood. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4637 Now, for two hundred and fifty bucks more........... 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4638 The soap works as a catalyst for Freudian slips. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4639 A bath a day keeps the unconscious desires to kill your father and sleep with your mother at bay. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4640 Are you feeling abandoned by Mr. Bubble? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4641 Just let the pain wash over you. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4642 Just let go, sir. It is quite a natural thing to do in a bath tub. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4643 Hydropsychotherapists call this next step the mind scrub... 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4644 How do you feel about my new hydrotherapy method? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4645 Let's get this 'wash-your-sins-away'-thing out of the way first, shall we? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4646 Let me know when you need the soap and brush. There's not much else I can do for anyone else in these days of Weltzschmerz. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4647 Now, tell me about your mother. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4648 You feel stuck because I put a bag of cement in the water. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4649 If I'm going to help you you must come clean. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4650 We are just going to scratch the surface 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4651 Would a loofa help your retrogression? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4652 Sometimes a back-scrub is just a back-scrub, 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4653 There's something in your teeth. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4654 I'm afraid that's all the time we have. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4655 May I offer some additional options for cleansing thoughts? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4656 Let’s go deeper into your subcutaneous. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4657 You'll love it. Prunes never experience guilt. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4658 Now we'll imagine all your fears as tiny piranhas. You'll need these to beat them off. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4659 As your therapist, I'll help you get out of hot water. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4660 Ja, if I slip the soap, then it is Freudian. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4661 This is a lot like how I fixed Brian Wilson. I used sand for him but it's the same kinda thing for you. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4662 You need to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4663 I could hand them to you but where’s the lesson in that? 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4664 I’m not THAT hairy. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
4665 You're a dam joke. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4666 You can never get enough fibre in your diet! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4667 I've been soaking clients for years. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4668 So now you've fulfilled your fantasy. Time for me to fulfill mine. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4669 Float therapy is over. One needs to be more...proactive about mental clutter. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4670 We'll scrub all your troubles away! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4671 Your insurance probably won't cover this session 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4672 The next time you try to stir up childhood memories, you’d do well to provide a little Mr. Bubble. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4673 My M.D. Wanted me to get hydrotherapy. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4674 You really need to come clean, or we do my soap-and-scrub brush therapy. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4675 ...and how does it feel when you get yourself into hot water? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4676 It is too hydrotherapy. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4677 Here--I think you can get it off your chest with this... 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4678 Actually, most of my patients prefer the couch, but they never seem to come out clean with their problems. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4679 Be careful not to slip when you get out! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4680 The couch is an antiquated concept. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4681 The bath salts are complimentary but unfortunately you insurance doesn't cover the soap or the scrubbing 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4682 You're the one who said you must come clean. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4683 Not till I get my rubber ducky 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4684 I’ve got your back here John. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4685 Next time, use cold water. Avoids a shrink in the wash. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4686 Your brain needs washing 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4687 This therapy will wash away all those guilty thoughts and inhabituations((:. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4688 Of course the hydro-therapy is cold, that's why they call me Dr. Froid. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4689 I thought for today's session we'd focus on your stink. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4690 First, the external . . . 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4691 It's best to start behind the ears. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4692 Thats nothing compared with the soaking you'll get with my bill 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4693 My technique is called the Bunkminster Fuller Brush approach. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4694 The Epsom salt, like the scrub brush, won't cost you anything. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4695 This will help you stop the dreams you're jumping off the Titanic. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4696 Now just lie back and tell me about your bubbles..... 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4697 Wool gathering during sessions will result in a hot bath to initiate shrinkage 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4698 No, I don't provide a towel. I'm not your mother. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4699 Would you prefer the couch? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4700 Afterward, for your fat-soluble neuroses, I will brush you with this lard cake. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4701 No, in fact, I don't know if insurance covers drinking your own bath water. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4702 So, you say that your father was a mudder... and your mother was ALSO a mudder...Do I have that right? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4703 You need to accept that mindful co-dependence is part of the therapeutic process. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4704 The womb must have been traumatic for you. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4705 I'm gonna wash that man right outta your hair. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4706 Now scrub away all that negativity... 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4707 It’s from Victorian Day Bed, Bath and Beyond. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4708 Sometimes a scrub brush is just a scrub brush. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4709 I told you we were going to clean up your act, remember? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4710 The full body crown will leave you with no cavaties, guaranteed. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4711 When you're comfortable, I'll help you with your shrinkage. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4712 Soap. Brush. Inner peace. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4713 When did you start to fear getting out of the tub? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4714 Since you feel like you're always in hot water, don't you think it's time to clean up your act?" 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4715 Your choice is to either let the water rise faster, or to have it come to a boiling point sooner. 'Both' is not an option. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4716 Now, clear your mind and think back to your dirtiest memories of childhood. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4717 Yes, Smedley, it’s therapy to wash your ego away. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4718 And then it snowed so much that I refused to leave my bathtub. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4719 Where you start scrubbing first will help me to determine your diagnosis. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4720 Don't use that kind of language with me young man,..., oh wait,.., never mind. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4721 This is a fine kettle of soup you're in now . 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4722 So you forgot your rubber ducky. How does that make you feel? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4723 Remember we're union. Don't be too eager to please. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4724 I'm eager too, but show some manners! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4725 You’re biting off ore than you can chew! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4726 Because mall rents are cheap, that’s why. Now talk. This place becomes a Lush in twenty minutes. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4727 The new Broadway smash hit, “Bert and Ernie the later years”. In this scene Ernie is in therapy after Bert moves out. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4728 I know it's a trifle viscous but it will harden soon! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4729 What did your Mother say when you told her that you thought you were a penguin? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4730 You can scrub a dub dub all you want Doctor, but I'm still very anxious and not relaxed at all in your tub. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4731 And now it's time to scrub, scrub, scrub, scrub those neuroses away! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4732 What do you think the rubber ducky really wanted? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4733 And the next part of your spa treatment is called the rock’n’roll brush. No screaming allowed. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4734 To have a clean psyche one must have a clean body 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4735 Yes it’s Freudian! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4736 Wow! My suggestion is: why don't you just turn over and breathe deeply. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4737 I want you to float with your unconscious, but you must scrub out your id first. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4738 Dam it, I said. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4739 So you can’t figure out why your iPhone no longer recognizes your thumbprint? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4740 Leaving a career in politics requires a complete reconstitution of your mental state, next take this scrub brush and soap. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4741 What do you think of my new bathtub therapy? Take this soap and brush while I book your next appointment! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4742 It’s a classic case of cleanness envy. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4743 Why do you think you always find yourself in hot water? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4744 It’s called Scrub-Away-the-Blues therapy 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4745 I can lead you to water, but I can't make you think. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4746 Your nobody until somebody scrubs you.. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4747 Once I start charging my clients for this service, I'll really clean up. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4748 We're going to go back now... 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4749 That's what I like about you, Larry. You're old school. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4750 It's crazy how rent in Manhattan has gone up . By having the office in a converted bathroom, I am able to keep your psychiatry rates down. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4751 For an additional $20.00 I do external cleansing as well. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4752 What? You think that's going to make up for your comment about my mother? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4753 I think that's enough for today. You're getting pruney. 1.0000 0.03922 26 26 0 0
4754 Since you’re taking a bath on this session, I thought I would make it realistic. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4755 It’s simple: When you’re in hot water, take a bath. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4756 I share your disappointment. But we both must face the fact that the baking soda submarine has a limited life span. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4757 The Cleansing Therapy starts on the outside and works deeply inward. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4758 It's called exposure therapy. In your next session we'll introduce the duck. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4759 So...I thought we'd try some immersion therapy today. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4760 I’m sorry, but even I am going to have to wash your mind out with soap. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4761 It's called "rub-a dub dub one man in a tub" therapy 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4762 The soap is free-floating and the brush is slip resistant. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4763 Soap and a brush won't be of much use if you're convinced you're in a bathtub full of oatmeal. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4764 All right, if that's the last of your mother issues I can start on your back. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4765 Now sing "I'm gonna wash that man right out of my hair". 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4766 Let's start with your head. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4767 I call it Spa Therapy. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4768 I hate to state the obvious, but you're in hot water Jim. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4769 Now don't get excited . . . 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4770 You were the one who insisted on Saturday night sessions 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4771 You’rrre ... getting ... soooooapyyy. 1.0000 0.05407 19 19 0 0
4772 ...And when you’re finished, I don’t want to hear about that dream ever again. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
4773 This works best if you get into a lather. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4774 Don't forget! I'm the branch manager. You're just the assistant branch manager. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4775 What the hell are you and your dam friends doing all night at the lodge? 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4776 Damn it, Carl! 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4777 Rock 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4778 I've got a twig to pick with you! 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4779 He wants to build a wall when what we need are dams. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4780 Your mother never ONCE took my side! 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4781 Sometimes a scrub brush and soap are just a scrub brush and soap. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
4782 It’s not Freudian. It’s not Jungian. It’s Mommyian. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
4783 Here, our time is almost up. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
4784 And now you'll have something to talk about next time. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
4785 So how was your week? 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
4786 I assure you this is the best treatment for germaphobia phobia. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
4787 Now that we have you nestled in the warm waters, like a womb, lets go back to the beginning. Your earliest memories of your mother, and go... 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
4788 Now, about that rubber ducky fixation... 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
4789 I call it Cognitive Bathtub Therapy. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
4790 Dr. Mordic hesitated before allowing Stan to borrow his personal set of tools for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
4791 Cleansing therapy is useless unless you use soap and a bath brush. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4792 Enjoy, before it disappears with Obamacare. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4793 And you thought you were washed up before you started seeing me. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4794 Tell me again about the time you were rubbed the wrong way 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4795 Before we further explore your boundary issues, would you like to create a safe word? 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4796 Your problem is that you have a dirty mind. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4797 So tell me, how does being in hot water make you feel? 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4798 No, it doesn’t help reduce your carbon footprint. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4799 I don’t give a dam, Stumpy - you’re not moving in next to me. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4800 Do you have a permit? 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4801 I have a gnawing feeling that no one gives a damn. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4802 "Cheer up, Zygmunt. Take these. Embrace your Liquid Modernity as a beginning; a cleansing ...". 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4803 In order for me to provide you with a meaningful diagnosis Mr. Morgan you'll have to stop lying to me and come clean. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4804 Sometimes a bath brush is just a bath brush. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4805 Exfoliation, not medication. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4806 I think it's time to come clean! 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4807 Soup to nuts, my patients open up more in the tub than on the couch. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4808 You do know, by taking the tree that fell in the forest, you ruined our experiment, right? 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4809 Do be careful not to throw the superego out with the bathwater. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
4810 Now that we've dealt with your fear of drowning in the bathtub, we can move on to spiders. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
4811 Splish Splash I was taking some Gestalt therapy, on about a Saturday night 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4812 And now, we scrub a dub dub our delusions away. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4813 How many times have I asked you not to bring your work home with you? 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4814 I find that confronting your fear of bathing, directly in session, works best. Now, do you prefer oatmeal almond or lavender vanilla? 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4815 True, I have been accused to take things too literally as a therapist, but enough about me: let's wash your troubles away. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4816 I'm going to wash that pain right out of your hair 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4817 No, that's not why they call us shrinks. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4818 It is time to wash that Dame right out of you hair. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4819 Freud recognized that Kohler makes bathroom products, pea soup AND toothbrushes. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4820 We will gradually introduce the rubber ducky into the next sessions 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4821 All the research said group therapy was an effective treatment. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4822 It's the only way the insurance company will reimburse me for today's session. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4823 Tell me about your scrubber. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4824 No, really. How does that make you feel? 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4825 First we address the body odor. Then we move on to your irrational fear that you stink. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4826 I meant with your EMOTIONS, when I asked you to come clean. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4827 It's standard Hollywood procedure 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4828 I call this session, "The Freudian Soup." 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4829 I think a clean start will solve most of your issues. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4830 And now when you enter the birth canal, go toward the light! 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4831 Your friends were right. Some shrinks do soak their patients. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4832 Mr. Weinstein, I've made you as comfortable as possible. I've assured you that what you tell me is covered by doctor-patient privilege. Come on now, what else must I do to get you to come clean? 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4833 Now, I hope this doesn't rub you the wrong way. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4834 Now I'm going to scrub your back and your teeth with this; your call on which happens first. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4835 Time spent in the bath is never wasted 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4836 When I said nothing could be done for your terminal case, this mud bath at least gets you used to the dirt. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4837 Your inner child forgot to wash behind the ears. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4838 I want you to come clean about what's really bothering you. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4839 #MeToo 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4840 Of course you can't have a "rubber duckie". What kind of therapy do you think I'm running here? 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4841 Feel the soap! Be the brush! 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4842 Think of this as the next phase of your reentry into society. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4843 Now close your eyes and tell me: are you still afraid of the deep end? 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4844 That's why they call it a sex drive. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4845 This will make the bad stuff surface so we can talk about it. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4846 Time's up. Next week we'll explore your feelings about loofahs. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4847 Oh that? The previous client just warmed it up a bit for you! 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4848 No extra charge for happy ending 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4849 With all due respect to our beloved Beatles I hold firm, my dear boy, that happiness is a warm bath. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4850 Yes, the doctor-patient privilege even covers this. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4851 I wasn't kidding when I said: 'Let your feelings wash over you.' 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4852 Now I'm afraid what happens next may seem uncomfortably Freudian. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4853 Mom always preferred Sigmund, but Psychotheraspa will change that! 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4854 I demand that my patients come clean. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4855 Ven I say a clean slate I mean a clean slate 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4856 What are you stewing about? 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4857 Freud, Schmoid. Just call me Siggy. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4858 Relax and tell me everything...do not fear a Freudian soap! 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4859 I’ve learned this therapy watching YouTub. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4860 You get started and I'll go grab the No More Fears shampoo. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4861 I treat germ phobia the old fashioned way. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4862 Now wash out your mouth. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4863 Be careful getting out. You might Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4864 I will now begin the first phase of Cognitive Bath Therapy with a gentle "soap "n Scrub". 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4865 Sometimes a hot bath is more than just a hot bath. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4866 My other couch is a tanning bed. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4867 Its a pioneering new treatment I call "aromapsychotherapy". 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4868 Please be sure to clean yourself and the tub. I have another scheduled immersion therapy in that water before lunch. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4869 This week is the Sampler of new alternative integrative options, if you go to your therapy dash board logon, in the upper left . . . under add ons. . . check the I accept and continue. . and then... 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4870 Nope... no rubber duckies. That would be silly. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4871 I'm gonna wash that mad right out of your hair! 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4872 Sometimes a scrub brush is just a scrub brush. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4873 If you're relaxed enough, we'll begin the brain washing. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4874 Now, just close your eyes and imagine that your are laying on a couch. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4875 Which would you like next your Freudian soap or your Freudian penis, um I mean brush? 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4876 Don't forget to scrub behind your fears. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4877 I'm gonna wash that psychosis outta your hair! 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4878 We talked about this, reenactment is very hard. Now go on; where was rubber ducky? 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4879 It's time you learn to let go. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4880 You've made so much progress . . . so how do feel about a little scrub-a-dub ? 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4881 Time to come clean, Mr Atherton. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4882 I told you I never wanted damn to come out of your mouth again! 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
4883 I dare you to have another one of those filthy wet dreams 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4884 Time to come clean with me. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4885 Getting wet is always the first step. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4886 There. Now let's go back to your mother's womb. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4887 I'm a dirty dirty boy! 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4888 What did you think we meant by "deep cleansing sessions?" 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4889 Oh geez, now what is that smell? 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4890 This session was a wash. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4891 The bad news is that your house is underwater too! 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4892 The certificates on the wall prove I am a board certified Backtologist! 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4893 Great! Now let's clean up the mess that's inside. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4894 Sometimes getting in how water helps motivate a clean up. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
4895 Ions in the water will positively charge your body. We'll discuss the brush when you're comfortable. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
4896 You call this therapy? I want my rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4897 How long have you had these dreams that you're drowning? 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
4898 Just remember if you help build that wall, neither of us has a green card! 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4899 Where the water goes is an existential question. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4900 Of course I understand what immersion therapy is. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4901 The therapy is fully covered, Mr. Glick, but towels are extra. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4902 We'll dive deeper next week. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4903 Now we have to work on those hard to reach places. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4904 ... and I agree the insurance-approved treatment for aquaphobia seems a bit antiquated! 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4905 I said you have an edifice complex. Not an Oedipus complex. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4906 So, did Harvey Weinstein give you a role in his nature documentary? 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4907 It's a simple choice, loofa or scrub-brush. After this we'll move on to those harder choices you've been struggling with. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
4908 You’ll find that my deluxe therapy will save time, but not money. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4909 Your problem seems to your fear of throwing out the baby with the bath water. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4910 Sure, he's good. But he's never had a gallery show. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4911 Have you considered that she may have left you because the Cialis made you forget the true purpose of a bathtub? 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4912 I think I'm ready to tell you about the bathtub story. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4913 Sometimes a rubber ducky is just a rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
4914 Exfoliation of the id is a crucial part of my therapy. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
4915 I miss Ernie 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4916 Sir “You stractch my back and I stractch your back” is a figure of speech! 1.0000 0.04652 22 22 0 0
4917 Now walk softly! 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
4918 Yes, ‘Superego’ is the more common translation. But I prefer ‘Soap Your Ego.’ 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
4919 I'm sorry, a sponge bath isn't covered by your insurance. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
4920 This will wash away your fears 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
4921 It’s mandated by Obamacare. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
4922 This sure is crazy, I never even make house call. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
4923 Today is the day I scrub your filthy unconscious. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
4924 Fair warning: I'll probably grab your cock. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
4925 Next we try some aromatherapy. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
4926 He offered but in his heart he knew, no amount of soap would change the fact this bath was not connected to the plumbing. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
4927 I’ll be damned. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
4928 Face it. You're damned if you do and damned if you don't. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
4929 Dam this river and the Devil take the hindmost. 1.0000 0.01575 64 64 0 0
4930 Now, let's hear more about this cleaning fetish you say your Mother had. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4931 I can’t scrub what I can’t see. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4932 'There is no ablution for the things I have done, is there, Doc?' 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4933 You'll feel better if you come clean. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4934 With your hydrotherapy, I throw in a back scrub. Your insurance won't cover a rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4935 Next week we'll move on to the loofah. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4936 While you're still in your comfort zone, I have a suggestion. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4937 It's called water therapy. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4938 I'm afraid your inner child is filthy. 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
4939 Do you consider using a brush to be moral, and the use of a loofah to be immoral? 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4940 Now slowly inhale through your nose and exhale through your head to release bad thoughts. Now 1.0000 0.02062 49 49 0 0
4941 If you need near-womb-like conditions in order to open up, this is the best I can do. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
4942 I find hydrotherapy is sometimes the only way. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4943 Yes, and your anger stems from your feelings of inferiority! Let’s just give a minute for that soak in. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4944 Don't worry it will all come out in the wash. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4945 Why yes, my specialty is hydrotherapy. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4946 "OK, now lets see how long both of you can hold your breath before another vigorous paddling"! 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4947 Don't be a dam fool, that will never fit! 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4948 I said I wanted teak flooring! 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4949 I can't guarantee the wood is organic. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4950 Did you notice the complete lack of perspective? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4951 Please make yourself comfortable. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4952 It's not your overbearing mother this time, it's me saying wash behind your ears. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4953 I am happy to let you bath for the next 20 minutes until our time runs out. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4954 It’s not all in your head. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4955 I'm gonna wash that mania right out of your head. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4956 Make sure to get under your frontal lobe. 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4957 Don't you think the great promise of this therapy is worth a little shrinkage? 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4958 Now focus. What is the scariest part? The water, the soap or the loofah? 1.0000 0.02151 47 47 0 0
4959 Part of your honesty therapy is to come clean. 1.0000 0.01739 58 58 0 0
4960 Blather up! 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4961 Use these to scrub away those hard to reach neuroses. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4962 Next, we scrub away those negative thoughts. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4963 Hey Bucky, where is my Ipana? 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4964 I don't give a dam! 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4965 I asked the furniture maker to build me the “chaise lounge equivalent” of a waterbed; he took some serious liberties, but it did come with a free bar of soap and a free back scrubber! 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4966 You have to WANT to get clean. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4967 This may seem like unorthodox therapy, but sometimes it is good to dive right into it. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4968 All right. Now what did your mother wash first? 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4969 Relaxed? Now slide your head under the water and hold it there and you'll be out of the mess you are in. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4970 I know you want a clean slate, but I need my hands to take notes. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4971 The couch was repossessed. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4972 Of course it's for the symbolism. Why else would we do this? 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4973 I can't help you unless you want to get clean. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4974 So the soap is your father, the loofah is your mother. What is it you want to tell them? 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4975 Now remember, you can't get to catharsis without a bit of exfoliation. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4976 And why do you feel you are drowning? 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4977 Relax.. lots of people have a Phelps fantasy. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4978 This is a step up from an Orgone Box 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4979 Let's finish this before your session runs over. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
4980 While I wash your back, tell me about your mother. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4981 Still stewing? 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4982 Seems to be the only type of therapy acceptable to millennials. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4983 Now do you understand 'displacement'? 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4984 You’ll get the soap when you get over your mommy issues. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4985 Your mother wishes you to use soap. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4986 It's not a fancy spa but it works. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4987 I'm hoping a hot bath and a good scrub will put some sense into your head. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4988 We treat all surface pathologies first. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4989 Now wash away your worries. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4990 You weren't pushing your loved ones away, it was the stench. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4991 I heard you were in hot water again Philip. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4992 I didn’t say Oak - I said Teak! Our first home has to be waterproof you dummy! 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
4993 No Mr. Weinstein, I don’t want to watch you take a bath either. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4994 When I said we'd be 'cleansing the vast depths' vut did you think I meant? 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4995 I'm not sure if I'm truly ready to come clean yet. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4996 You know it’s gonna come out in the wash. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4997 Did you drop the soap, or was that a Freudian slip? 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
4998 I'm afraid we're out of wine. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
4999 Specific therapy depends on whether you are channeling the butcher, the baker or the candlestick maker. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5000 Sometimes a brush is just a brush! 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5001 Wow. Your creative visualization isn't wanting. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5002 Tell me about your mother's womb. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5003 It’s a new kind of immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5004 And you say I'm holding a brush? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5005 Sometimes, Mr. Müller, a bar of soap is just a bar of soap. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5006 Rubber Duckie he's the one But grown men, they to shun Rubber Duckies who're way/way too fond of you.. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5007 I did tell you we'd be dipping into a new form of therapy this week. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5008 Tell me about your plumber. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5009 Exfoliate. You'll feel like a new person. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5010 How would it make you feel if the soap didn't float? 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5011 It’s a combination of Freud and Bed, Bath & Beyond. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5012 No,I can't see your hands. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5013 I think you forgot to wash between your ears. 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
5014 Gnawty boy!" 1.0000 0.01980 51 51 0 0
5015 Well, you're not the New Yorker you used to be - culturally, you stink. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5016 Today, we get a fresh start with your addiction. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5017 Tell me more about your kneidlach complex. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5018 How many times do I have to tell you: measure twice, gnaw once. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5019 Dr. Freud's prep for therapy once believed symbolic, was simply because some patients were too gross to use the couch. 1.0000 0.01905 53 53 0 0
5020 When they drained the swamp, it had to go somewhere. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
5021 Unfortunately, the rubber ducks weren't covered by your insurance. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
5022 Next time please bring your own towel. 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
5023 Just relax... and tell me what's bothering you? 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
5024 This is why we never get any dam work done! 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
5025 Normally, my patients don't 'bring their own chairs.' 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5026 Sorry. I couldn't afford a couch. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5027 I can help, only if you're willing to get your hair wet. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5028 I think it's time to come clean! 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5029 I know, Andrew. But everyone is afraid to step out of their comfort zone. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
5030 For this to work, you gotta come clean. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5031 I want you to expose yourself to me. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5032 So Frank, is this your first time seeing a bathologist? 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5033 In life, it’s important to keep your head above water. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5034 Oops, the hour's up. We'll pick it up right here next week. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5035 Would it help if I told you I am board certified by the American Society of Bath Tub Therapists? 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5036 Must we go through this before each session... 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5037 First you must come clean 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5038 Wanna come clean? 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5039 Now, we agreed, Mr. Dibley. First we scrub, THEN we get Ducky. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5040 talk about wet dreams..... 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5041 I can see you're stewing. You really need to learn how to brush things off. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5042 Well, I had to cover my lost ACA income with additional services. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5043 The couch is so yesterday 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
5044 I'll wash your back if you speak to me. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5045 You need to clean up your act 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5046 After you wash behind your ears we can discuss your attachment to the rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5047 Are you ready to think about your back? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
5048 It's not an inferiority complex. You really do stink! 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5049 And be sure to scrub your libido really well. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5050 To be honest, I can’t really concentrate on what you’re saying unless we add bubbles. LOTS of bubbles. 1.0000 0.03774 27 27 0 0
5051 This is not what I meant by getting in touch with your inner child. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5052 I'm sorry, but your grime is up 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5053 And now for Lady Macbeth guilt therapy. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5054 Would you like me to scrub your subconscious? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5055 Mr Weinstein this is an important part of your treatment. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5056 And how does tbe soap represent your mother? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5057 As we've discussed, I am not your mother - so you will need to scrub the dirty parts. THEN, perhaps, we can discuss any transference issues you might be harboring. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5058 Is this what you meant by needing water therapy? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5059 Z'good news is z'hand washing is gone... 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5060 You get a scrub with cash co-pay 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5061 I can't offer much solace. Psycho therapy requires a shower. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5062 OK, so you did not bury your head in the sand! You think Freud will be pleased? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5063 let's try it this time without the rubber ducky and see what happens. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5064 Are you sure the butcher and the baker deliberately abandoned you? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5065 Now close you eyes, and your imaginary rubber ducky will float your worries away 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5066 When you let go of the submarine I’ll give you the soap. 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5067 You are bathing in misery. 1.0000 0.01942 52 52 0 0
5068 You're going to pay for that Wall. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5069 Hold these so I'll know what you're doing with your hands. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
5070 Ok, and then what did Mr. Weinstein do? 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
5071 The long years are over, Mr. Walker. This is the last step in your treatment. Beyond Freud. Way beyond theory. A final make-you-whole application: Soap to wash your id. A brush to scrub your ego. A tub to soak your superego. 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
5072 You dam well better hope your measurments are right! 1.0000 0.02105 48 48 0 0
5073 It's high time you come clean with us, Paul. 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
5074 They are still using Charcoal. what a bunch of dinosaurs! 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
5075 Now, place this in your arm pit, close your eyes, and count backward from 100...tell me when you see your mother. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
5076 You have to come clean! 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
5077 Are you ready for the next step in your psychobabble bath? 1.0000 0.02247 45 45 0 0
5078 Sorry if you misunderstood, but I distinctly said primal STEAM therapy. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
5079 You're right, it's not self-cleaning. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
5080 I suggest you throw out your libido with the bathwater, Mr. Weinstein. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5081 We're going to wash that entitlement out of your hair. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5082 Coming clean at the psychiatrist's 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5083 Pull the plug, and air it all out. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5084 Where were we? 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5085 you can’t expect therapy to work if you don’t come clean. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5086 My new submersion therapy method isn't for your benefit. It's for mine. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5087 We may never get to your issues, but at least you're clean. 1.0000 0.02985 34 34 0 0
5088 You vant I should scrub your back? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5089 I’m afraid we’ll have to end it there. Try not to dry out too much before next week. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5090 How long have you identified closely with submarines? 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5091 Your wife suggested that this would solve over half of your intimacy issues. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
5092 For patients who feel dirty when talking about sexual issues, this approach can be very beneficial. 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
5093 Let the brainwashing begin. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5094 What, do you prefer the cold shower treatment? 1.0000 0.03175 32 32 0 0
5095 I have a couple add-ons I think you'll really enjoy. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5096 Literally and physically, you're in hot water. With sexual misconduct accusations reaching an all time high, it was just a matter of time. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
5097 These extra items are yours for only $19.99. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
5098 Let's talk about my water bill. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5099 So what if I don't have your rubber ducky! 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5100 You'll feel much better when we scrub away your neuroses. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5101 I told you, it's got to be ash. 1.0000 0.04256 24 24 0 0
5102 Now! Come Clean!! 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5103 That's my dam branch! 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5104 On the maiden voyage into the subconscious we will rub a dub dub. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5105 I'm soaking you literally, financially figuratively. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5106 What comes to your mind when you see my small hands? 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5107 Lather is the best medicine. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5108 Today we will be working on intimacy issues. 1.0000 0.06455 16 16 0 0
5109 Let's get in touch with your inner child. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5110 If we're not going to drain the swamp, we at least have to clean it up 1.0000 0.02198 46 46 0 0
5111 You just don't give a dam 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5112 That's none of your dam business. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5113 No. You need to be clean with yourself first. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5114 If we had developed language, I’d say, “You bonk him on the head, I’ll think of some ‘religious ritual’ stuff to leave here too.” 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5115 Wow, you really do have a problem with bedwetting! 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
5116 Wash away the blues! 1.0000 0.02469 41 41 0 0
5117 If you thought my theory of mind was interesting, you're going to be excited by my theory of body. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
5118 It's okay, I've got your back. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5119 Now, just close your eyes and let my your new realization soak in, Mr. Jones. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5120 No, Roy. The soap is Quint. I don't know where Dreyfus is. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5121 Actually, my specialty is MENTAL hygiene. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5122 No, there's no such thing as "shower envy." 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5123 Yes, I understand that you suffer from a chronic fear of bathing but I find it's best that I see my Ablutophobia patients in my office. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5124 Your id was especially dirty. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5125 You may feel safe, M. Marat, in a warm bath, it there are no really safe places to hide. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5126 I gnawed that down. You're a dam thief. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5127 Frankly, Scarlett, I won't give a dam! 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5128 You can't continue to have your tree and eat it too. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5129 Eat slowly dear. Let's enjoy it together. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5130 'Give me that dam stick!' 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5131 This should help you get off to a clean start. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5132 This therapy has me in hot water. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5133 and his art will be worth twice as much when he's extinct... 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5134 Ok...now. Just let that soak in. Then, we can talk about your mother. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
5135 Well you certainly have found yourself in a stew. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
5136 No really, I scratch your back, you scratch my back is a valid form of therapy. 1.0000 0.03509 29 29 0 0
5137 If you obstruct my view I'll sue, dam it. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5138 The new hot tub therapy brings you back to early bath times 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5139 Considering the Political and Social climate we a experiencing these days. Look at this form of therapy, as a way of washing the stench from your mind and body. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5140 Lets revisit a recent trauma, you taking a bath in the stock market. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5141 Don't sweat it! I've got your back 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5142 Freud would have started by asking you about your mother. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5143 Jüng, alas, and easily Freudened 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5144 There's only 10 minutes left of this session, would you like to scrub away what is troubling you? 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5145 I'm still annoyed with my wife, but these sessions really bring out the best in my skin. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5146 Don't suppress your feelings; submerge them. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5147 Just don't make a Freudian slip. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5148 I'm gonna wash that thought right outta your head. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5149 Hello from the otter side. 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5150 You were there. He specifically said to floss only after dinner. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5151 I want to make sure you're entirely comfortable, you dirty dirty boy. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5152 Co-pay Disputes at Aspen Dental. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5153 Don't worry, I'll find you a tooth pick. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5154 We're going to build a wall? 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5155 Come clean. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5156 We’re gonna wash that anger right out of your hair. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5157 My therapy requires a healthy mind in a clean body 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5158 Talk about doing anything for your patients. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5159 Now, where do we start? 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5160 Organic? Sure. Gluten-free? Obviously. But is it a GMO-free birch? Is it? Tell me! 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5161 We could try a couch next. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5162 You have a dirty habit, have no fears, remember to wash your ears. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5163 When you're ready, I'll kosher you. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5164 Ir takes a clean body to host a clean consciousness. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5165 Just so you know, your insurance doesn't cover scrubbing. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5166 By the amount of issues it was the only therapy I thought of starting 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5167 No longer do you need to look behind: You have someone to wash your back 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5168 Yes, it is concrete. That's why I charge by the hour. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5169 I have found it's a better way to release your "inner demons". 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5170 Huh! So this must be the cleanse I keep hearing about on Instagram 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5171 You're busy, but are you fulfilled? 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5172 Bucky...using your teeth like that is "Pulp Friction". 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5173 I hear this is the second time you’ve won the “I” m an asshole contest” 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5174 Something you said has been gnawing at me... 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5175 This is a good place to stop. Let's work on that spot between your shoulders next time. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5176 Now take me back to the day you almost drowned 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5177 In clinical studies the loofah was more effective than psychotherapy. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5178 I can't help you unless your willing to come clean. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5179 Let's try cleansing your soul this way 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5180 ?? I’m gonna wash, wash, wash that pain right out of your hair ?? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5181 I know it seems a bit unorthodox, but now I can write off my water bills. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5182 I favor the 'displacement' method in my psychoanalysis; as a bonus, you get a bath 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5183 Scrub away your anxieties. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5184 First we cleansed the mind...next we cleanse the body! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5185 So you talked about cleaning up your act... 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5186 Of course you feel a drain. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5187 Finally, our big break in the toothpick business. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5188 You are just being self indulgent now. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5189 You said you wanted a clean start! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5190 Our therapy? A hot bath and good book are the best cures for depression. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5191 I can only help you, if you come clean with me! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5192 We're going to try something different today. Instead of figuratively scrubbing away your latent anxieties . . . 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5193 Oh, soul, I thought you said 'soil'. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5194 The inspiration for Immersion Counseling was my mother. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5195 For the next therapy stage, we'll add the butcher and baker. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5196 You will not get your back scrubbed until you tell me about your tub soaking obsession. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5197 Webbed feet is a common fantasy. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5198 Quite frankly, no one gives a dam. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5199 This wasn't the type of water therapy he was expecting... 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5200 Total immersion should provide the cure. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5201 Here use this, it's like an exfoliant for your psyche. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5202 Your wife says your a little aloof-a 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5203 Do I get the part, Mr. Weinstein? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5204 I want you to come clean to me. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5205 Things really never get more clear than this 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5206 The longer we talk about it , the colder the waters going to get 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5207 This is as close as I can get you to your Mother's womb. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5208 Now remember, clean body, clean mind! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5209 Relax, go back to a time when you used to like taking a bath... 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5210 I said hydrotherapy, not psychotherapy. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5211 For $200 an hour, it's the least I can do. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5212 Doc, this is nice and all, but I really don't see how this is going to make me get over my fear of commitment. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5213 It’s ok. I’m a doctor 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5214 So... you feel like a bar of soap quietly melting to nothing? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5215 Back therapy 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5216 It's all about coming clean with yourself 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5217 I thought you where joking. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5218 You are in hot water now; psychotherapy will be of no help 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5219 If you want our sessions to be productive, you're going to have to come clean with me! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5220 No, the Phd on my diploma stands for "Plumbing Hardware Design" 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5221 You're wrong. The saying is "if you scratch my back, I'll scratch your back'. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5222 Perhaps you misunderstood what I meant by 'immersion therapy.'' 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5223 rebirth therapy--with a very strict and controlling mother 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5224 "In my office we do more than head shrinking". 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5225 Now, are you feeling relaxed enough to tell me how you got in hot water with your boss? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5226 Are you ready for ze loofa? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5227 We in the trade call it Cassatte Therapy 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5228 We need to renegotiate our storm clearance contract with FEMA. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5229 I saw it first!!! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5230 I bet you can't even chuck that wood 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5231 You're a little short in the tooth to be telling me how to build a dam. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5232 You clean up you're own dam mess. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5233 You know when people say 'Damn it,' that's not what they mean, right? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5234 We are making progress, but I’m not getting in again this week Dale. I can wash your back from here! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5235 Most of my patients don't just have dirty minds. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5236 So you say these two objects evoke memories of taking a bath... 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5237 Clean body Clean mind 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5238 Now, let's wash away those bad memories. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5239 These sessions have cleaned out your bank account; why not have them clean you? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5240 I'm sorry, our time is up for today, but for an extra $250 I'll scrub your back. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5241 Just give it a minute and the cement will harden. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5242 I see....And do huge tooth brushes make you feel? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5243 It's nothing to be ashamed of -- I have wet dreams, too. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5244 Ordinarily I would say there's no such thing as a dirty thought in therapy, but that one takes the prize. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5245 time to rub some of that neo-con off of ya 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5246 'Listen here Chuck,i've warned you about not wearing your safety googles." 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5247 I'm sorry, you only get bubbles with integrative psychotherapy. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5248 It's a traditional Danish practice I learned about last week in the New York Times. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5249 I liked it better, when we worked for the car wash. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5250 I guess I just always feel like I’m drowning 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5251 You're my third Presidential Press Secretary. Brush? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5252 Scrubbing is the latest technique in removing stress! 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5253 Are you feeling more comfortable yet? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5254 ...and does that make you feel dirty? 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5255 Just know that during our sessions, I've got your back. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5256 Now for the brainwashing part of our therapy. 1.0000 0.03077 33 33 0 0
5257 Did you get all your permits and HOA blessing to do that? 1.0000 0.02598 39 39 0 0
5258 Mind if I wash away your defense mechanisms? 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5259 Your current problems vill be as nothink vhen this soap-shaped blauentooth speaker joins you in dem vasser... 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5260 Before I do this you need to realize we are sharing the same bad Freudian dream. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5261 Cleanliness is next to godliness. And you could use some scrubbing. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5262 Now are you in your safe space? 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5263 Now do you feel I've got your back? 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5264 How would you feel about a little scrubby? 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5265 Your current situation really stinks. This should clean things up. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5266 But I scrub all my patients' ids. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5267 If you like, I could scratch that Idtch. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5268 Yea don't worry, nightmare reenactments have really helped some of my other patients. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5269 I understand you still feel dirty from the election, but can't we please go back to just talking? 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5270 You still need me to scrub your back. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5271 Your insurance just covers the immersion. The therapy add-on is extra. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5272 ...and next week we will deal with your fear of being burned alive. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5273 Take courage. We’re going to wash that man right out of your hair! 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5274 No, it's not a very large toothbrush. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5275 Before I scrub, I must tell you I charge more for Saturday baths. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5276 The next step is seeing if you can do this without your rubber ducky at home. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5277 And then what did your rubber ducky say to you? 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5278 There can be no progress without soap. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5279 Let that thought soak in ... 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5280 I don't mean to scrub but... time's up 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5281 It's like I've been telling you, you gotta stick it to the dam! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5282 You call THAT a big stick? I'm not intimidated. And, Everyone could hear you clomping around! Noisy Little-Stick guy.. Sad. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5283 You're a damned thief! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5284 You millennials hardly give a dam! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5285 DON'T say beaver! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5286 I think he makes you look good, Todd. I hope he remembers to Photoshop my stomach. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5287 I thought I smelled Birch on your breath! You know I only allow Maple in our lodge! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5288 Gnaw! gnaw,! gnaw! That's all that you ever do, and I'm getting tired of it. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5289 And now the illegal funding of the Trump dossier? Just how many Hillary Clinton scandals have to be revealed before you stop chewing that damned stick? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5290 Oh hey, I think you have something stuck in your teeth. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5291 Do not tell me you are off to that damn lodge again! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5292 Put that dam log with the others. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5293 Alright...that does it. Who is she? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5294 I told you we should have gone to IKEA. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5295 Now, vee exsouliate. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
5296 Technically, that means you do want at least one scrub. 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
5297 like on TV, this is a cure for erectile dysfunction, trust me.... 1.0000 0.03637 28 28 0 0
5298 your problem is not in your head, it's your body odor!! 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5299 If returning to the womb makes you feel unclean... 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5300 Let's turn that sinking feeling into a positive action. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5301 Be careful you don’t Freudian slip when you get out. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5302 Drowning in what? 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
5303 I told you: I don't LIKE camping. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
5304 Have you accounted for the tax burden of the externalities? 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5305 What's the first thing that pops into your head when you hear the word 'soap'? 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5306 And then what did your mother do? 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5307 You need to start standing up for yourself more, then we can use the shower. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5308 I think we have your Post Traumatic Skunk Disorder under control now 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5309 I'm glad you agree it's time for a clean break 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5310 I forgot to mention, there are five live eels in there. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5311 In just one session this treatment will get you out of hot water whilst washing away your sins. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5312 When they offered me these hydrotherapy sessions I pictured something different. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5313 You do it. I get $300 an hour. 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5314 You're building a what? A bridge to nowhere? 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5315 bite me 1.0000 0.02410 42 42 0 0
5316 Sometimes a back brush is just a back brush. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5317 I'm seeing a shrink. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5318 You said you wanted a clean bill of mental health. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5319 Only two more Lobster Bisque baths, and the Journal of Advanced Quackery confirms you'll be cured! 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5320 You know I always say, when you find yourself in hot water, make sure you scrub everywhere. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5321 I hear hydrotherapy is trending these days. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5322 It's more of a you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours sort of approach. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
5323 Couches are so Twentieth Century thinking 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5324 And now we complete your immersion therapy. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5325 When you suggested immersion therapy, I didn't take you literally. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5326 I really don't think that there's anything in there with you. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5327 Perhaps it is time you come clean with yourself, Mr. Brest. 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5328 Are you feeling the metaphor yet? 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5329 Dammit Carol, I thought you were taking care of the kids! 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5330 If you keep eating that stuff, you're going to need braces ! 1.0000 0.02667 38 38 0 0
5331 I though we agreed on repurposed wood? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5332 Freud used a loofa, but a brush will really get to the root of your problems. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5333 When they awaken, find themselves in mashed potatoes being lectured to by Ivan Karamzov with a brush and a bar of soap...the plot begins to make sense. sh 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5334 If you're happy with your chest, we'll start removing it from your lower back next week. 1.0000 0.02532 40 40 0 0
5335 I don't know Doc, I just don't feel like I'm solid ground anymore. 1.0000 0.06901 15 15 0 0
5336 Well, we can try. But I think 'wash that man right outta my hair' is a metaphor. 1.0000 0.02020 50 50 0 0
5337 We are trying something new today. 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
5338 You're drowning in your own fears 1.0000 0.03390 30 30 0 0
5339 Now, I would like you to think back to that first memory of all....zzzzzz. 1.0000 0.05130 20 20 0 0
5340 Before you start your rebirthing would you kindly remove the placental ring from the last patient? 1.0000 0.02899 35 35 0 0
5341 Your id will also need a pedicure. 1.0000 0.02353 43 43 0 0
5342 I regret not getting rid of the couch sooner. 1.0000 0.02740 37 37 0 0
5343 Hey man, do you mind chucking me that piece of wood? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5344 Tell me more about your rubber ducky 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5345 Good morning Mr Duckie. Or may I call you Robert? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5346 Our time is up. Be careful not to Freudian Slip on your way out. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5347 garfied movie on vhs 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5348 So, if we explore your first childhood trauma a bit more...wait, did you just pee in the bathtub? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5349 It's been ten sessions. You're ready to confront the loofah. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5350 I can't help you until you come clean with me. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5351 I find that having you in the bath relaxes me immensely. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5352 So, I think we're making good progress... But, tell me more about this 'baker'. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5353 It's scrubconscious therapy: you dish the dirt on yourself--I scrub! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5354 We call it "soap" therapy. It will clean your conscience. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5355 Sorry, you won't wash away your sins. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5356 Clean body, clean mind. Now we just need to put this in your mouth... 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5357 Mens lavata in corpore lavato 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5358 You can come clean here. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5359 Close your eyes and relax. Now, imagine yourself floating like a rubber ducky in a warm bath tub. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5360 You have your answers right there in your sweaty palms. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5361 What did I get myself into, anyway? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5362 Relax, I have got a few wishy-washy degrees." 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5363 How about a good rub after the analysis? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5364 And when we're done, I'll take you to the cleaners. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5365 Imagine now you are a giant tooth. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5366 Why must you always bite off more than you can chew? 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5367 A three year old iguana could have done that. 1.0000 0.02299 44 44 0 0
5368 The Loofah Technique comes from Freud's early writings 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
5369 Did that episode leave you feeling dirty? 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
5370 The final step is to cleanse your soul. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
5371 I'm sorry, Mr. Weinstein, this is where I draw the line. 1.0000 0.03279 31 31 0 0
5372 No, you can't just "wash that man right out of your hair". 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5373 And your next session will include a rubber ducky! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5374 They say this cleanses you of your past. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5375 Getting soaked by the psychiatrist. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5376 Your friends may not be speaking metaphorically — you really do stink! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5377 " Can you remember what age you were when for the first time the sight of a 'rubber duck' brought the fear of GOD in you?" , 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5378 I see that our time is up. As you're the last patient today, please drain the tub and remove any ring. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5379 If immersion therapy doesn't work, we'll try exposure. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5380 You mind is not the only thing in need of scrubbing 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5381 Now, in phase two of your exposure therapy, I keep reminding you about the one confused, insatiable piranha that's in there with you. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5382 It's all in your head. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5383 Sorry, a sponge bath session is extra. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5384 I'm sick and tired of your damn dam. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5385 I think you missed a spot 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5386 And now I'll try to scrub your brain. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5387 Well Doc, I've been in some hot water recently. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5388 This may help you get things off your chest. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5389 Next week we will discuss your relationship with your mother. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5390 So you see, on an all in basis, my hourly rate is not that bad. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5391 It's important that you come clean with me if you want this to work. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5392 now imagine your in quicksand up to your head! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5393 How long have you been laundering money? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5394 My fee goes up if the water level comes down. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5395 The couch is out and chicken soup is in. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5396 I'm not brushing you off, just floating an idea you can sink your teeth into. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5397 Its my idea for a water couch... 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5398 Hot water always does that. It's why they call me a shrink! 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5399 Would you like a little scrub? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5400 Do you have any thoughts about washing yourself? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5401 Your not neurotic ...You just miss your rubber ducky. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5402 Your deep seated emotions of always feeling dirty are easily solved. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5403 You see, we all yearn to be back in the womb. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5404 Sir, we are engaged in science here, not Scientology. I am NOT trying to brainwash you. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5405 Let's wash away all your fears. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5406 I believe in full immersion therapy 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5407 Mr. Mueller offers you one option. Come clean. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5408 For the last time, where are you hiding that rubber ducky? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5409 The last tenant was a serial killer who installed it to chemically dissolve bodies, yet the landlord refused to pay for the removal. I affectionately call it the Psychobath. Now, scrub your back and lets return to your anxiety issues. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5410 Is the water cool enough for you? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5411 First we'll soak your ID and then scrub up the EGO. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5412 So tell me, how do you feel about being up to your neck in hot water? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5413 What about me reminds you of your mother? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5414 Now is your self-as-steam issue imagined, or could it be more real? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5415 You see, the best cure for pathos is bathos. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5416 Exactly how much thought did you put into this valentine gift? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5417 The soap and brush can help you come clean. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5418 Apparently this wasn’t what you were expecting when your wife signed you up for a hydro-therapy session? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5419 Yes, my mother raised me in a strict Freudian environment. Why do you ask? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5420 Relax. I assume this is your first plunge into integrated therapy? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5421 Now tell me more about your morbid fear of minestrone... 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5422 I'd like to explore this further, but I see our tubby time is almost up. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5423 My analysis cleanses the soul, along with everything else. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5424 I think you've gotten TOO comfortable in our sessions. 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5425 Let me know if you need the soap! Now, tell me about your childhood? 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5426 Yes, your condition does call for immersion therapy 1.0000 0.02817 36 36 0 0
5427 I wasn't expecting "opening up" to be this literal. 1.0000 0.08006 13 13 0 0