Contest #585


Cartoon

585


Name Value
Submission deadline -
Voting started 2017-09-26
Voting ended -
Finalists announced -
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued 2017-10-09 (estimated)
Number of captions 4703
Number of responses 356787
Number of participants 11837


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 I went ahead and fixed the bagel setting, too. So with parts and labor, that actually comes out to two wishes. 1.9718 0.01313 3231 947 1428 856
1 OK, your crumb tray is cleaned and the coffee is brewing. You have one left. 1.9494 0.01237 3714 1154 1594 966
2 It was the only way I could get into the country. 1.9180 0.01460 3061 1134 1044 883
3 you have three wishes, as long as they're light, medium and dark.. 1.9099 0.01211 3950 1337 1632 981
4 Toasted sesame is way different than open sesame and you know it. 1.8657 0.01506 2785 1091 977 717
5 Thanks, kid, I've been in there since your parents' wedding. 1.8481 0.01554 2547 1006 922 619
6 Listen, if you want to talk to my supervisor, rub the coffee maker. 1.8193 0.01444 2740 1075 1085 580
7 Toast, Master? 1.8118 0.02080 1408 586 501 321
8 Thanks, Master! For awhile there, I thought I was toast! 1.8075 0.01708 2057 853 747 457
9 Rub all you like, kid. All you're gonna get is toast. 1.8042 0.01272 3514 1410 1382 722
10 World peace? When you so obviously need a blender? 1.7983 0.01479 2697 1122 997 578
11 Hi, I'm the genie with the light brown hair. You may adjust the setting if you want it darker. 1.7787 0.02965 687 300 239 148
12 Could you please rub the coffee pot? I need to talk to my wife. 1.7780 0.01610 2347 1032 804 511
13 Oh, a Hamilton seat!! I thought you said a Hamilton-Beach. 1.7722 0.01965 1633 743 519 371
14 Sorry, kid, if I could make America great, I wouldn't be living in a toaster. 1.7541 0.02104 1395 644 450 301
15 The lamp was great, but the toaster has internet. 1.7533 0.01522 2456 1076 910 470
16 Make a different wish, your bagel is really stuck. 1.7500 0.01474 2652 1178 959 515
17 I know it's not customary, but the last guy rubbed me the wrong way. 1.7221 0.01626 2098 954 773 371
18 It wasn't plugged in. You have two more wishes. 1.7160 0.01620 2148 997 764 387
19 Your first wish is a Pop Tart? 1.6911 0.01996 1353 638 495 220
20 Two wishes remaining. Maybe aim a little higher than 'fix the toaster?' 1.6844 0.01722 1787 844 663 280
21 This place is way better, has two skylights and an elevator. 1.6740 0.02479 914 454 304 156
22 Next time disable your pop-up blocker. 1.6730 0.02204 1156 575 384 197
23 I've been updated to work across multiple devices 1.6676 0.03702 361 169 143 49
24 You get 3 slices... 1.6594 0.02144 1236 633 391 212
25 I can fix the toaster but I still say you'd be better off wishing for a new one. 1.6556 0.02081 1170 567 439 164
26 Yeah, but it's a dry heat. 1.6536 0.02440 866 425 316 125
27 I would have been here sooner but I had to find a way around the Travel Ban. 1.6531 0.02245 1133 588 350 195
28 With this travel ban, it was the only way I could get into the country. 1.6493 0.02392 998 521 306 171
29 Rub me the wrong way and you're toast 1.6464 0.02313 1035 534 333 168
30 Take three more. I couldn't get all the crumbs out either. 1.6345 0.02424 892 456 306 130
31 An edible gluten-free bread loaf? I'm a genie, not a miracle worker. 1.6323 0.04322 291 152 94 45
32 What can I say, kid? It's roomier and has central heating and an elevator. 1.6296 0.02617 837 452 243 142
33 Yes, I can fit into the coffeemaker too. But that will be number two and I think you're missing the point here. 1.6272 0.02616 802 425 251 126
34 You know, it's really pretty easy to make it yourself. 1.6261 0.02571 813 427 263 123
35 That was the old days. Now you get three apps. 1.6172 0.02635 734 381 253 100
36 Yes kid, living in a toaster does have it's ups and downs. 1.6169 0.02658 723 376 248 99
37 Listen carefully; the options have changed. 1.6109 0.02677 681 350 246 85
38 OK, your 'Hot Pockets' will never again be cold in the middle. What's wish number two? 1.6070 0.02737 654 339 233 82
39 I found this a better way to get into the country! 1.6058 0.02829 652 349 211 92
40 Your knish is my command. 1.6041 0.02875 634 341 203 90
41 "Light," "Medium," and "Dark" are the only 3 wishes I'm allowed to grant. 1.6038 0.02868 636 342 204 90
42 I am your toastmaster. 1.6016 0.02997 620 345 177 98
43 Don't rub the coffee pot. I can't stand that guy. 1.5959 0.03088 584 328 164 92
44 Toast is easy. The last guy wished to be president. 1.5953 0.03294 551 321 132 98
45 Hi! I'm your genie with the light brown toast. 1.5952 0.03094 578 324 164 90
46 A bagel and coffee is two wishes 1.5945 0.02939 577 308 195 74
47 Gotta keep moving around; I may be magic, but I'm not documented. 1.5926 0.03112 567 318 162 87
48 Your knish is my command. 1.5920 0.03537 424 234 129 61
49 Thanks kid, I was nearly toast. 1.5907 0.03147 557 314 157 86
50 You have no idea how few people think to rub a toaster. 1.5894 0.02949 548 289 195 64
51 We don't do slang. You ask for bread, you get bread. 1.5833 0.03254 516 293 145 78
52 You can ask him, but fair trade, shade grown, and dark roast are going to count as three separate wishes. 1.5828 0.03052 513 274 179 60
53 Let me get this straight. It's world peace, the girl of your dreams, and a tall Colombian roast? 1.5815 0.03133 509 278 166 65
54 No way! That magic lamp is the FIRST place the ICE agents will look! 1.5810 0.03258 506 286 146 74
55 I ate your pop-tarts so you get an extra wish. 1.5795 0.03166 497 272 162 63
56 It's fixed, but I suggest that you not waste any more wishes on appliances. 1.5764 0.03245 484 269 151 64
57 If you were 600 years old you'd need some help popping out of things too. 1.5726 0.03317 468 263 142 63
58 No one uses lamps anymore. We're all connected to the Internet of Things. 1.5721 0.03565 409 231 122 56
59 Coffee first. Then we'll talk wishes. 1.5702 0.03240 456 249 154 53
60 whatever you do, don't rub the coffee maker. 1.5702 0.03371 456 258 136 62
61 You know, it'll just pop out when it's ready. You don't need me to keep checking. 1.5699 0.03669 379 213 116 50
62 Actually you only get one wish, but I could throw in a free toaster. 1.5699 0.03244 458 251 153 54
63 Thank you, master. I like it much better. It has electric heating, a skylight, and 2 rooms instead of one. 1.5679 0.03383 449 254 135 60
64 For New York, that's a lot of space! 1.5616 0.03321 422 231 145 46
65 You've used two wishes and you still have a studio apartment? 1.5603 0.04486 282 169 68 45
66 I'm the pleasant one. The coffee genie is somewhat bitter. 1.5585 0.03531 410 235 121 54
67 Toast? One of your three wishes is toast? 1.5585 0.03428 410 229 133 48
68 Yes, well I winter in the toaster 1.5533 0.03460 394 220 130 44
69 Sorry, even I can't make gluten free bread taste good. 1.5533 0.03798 394 239 92 63
70 Do you mind condemning me to the coffee pot instead? I've never had a room with a view. 1.5527 0.03587 389 223 117 49
71 I'm outta here. Tell your parents Hide' N Seek was the third wish. 1.5518 0.03860 386 236 87 63
72 Asking for gluten free toast counts as two wishes. 1.5515 0.03613 388 224 114 50
73 It's part of the extended warranty 1.5506 0.03502 385 216 126 43
74 We transitioned to small appliances years ago. 1.5500 0.03496 380 212 127 41
75 I don't care if you have another wish left. You wanted Trump, you got him. I'm outta here. 1.5481 0.03904 374 229 85 60
76 Sorry, but I burnt your first wish. 1.5459 0.03628 370 212 114 44
77 I've fixed the coffee-maker and the toaster, but couldn't this third wish have something to do with, say, world peace or the end of hunger? 1.5452 0.03561 365 205 121 39
78 Gluten free, non fat, AND delicious? I'm a genie, not a miracle worker. 1.5440 0.03932 364 223 84 57
79 Toaster Genie's not a bad gig-- it's a big improvement over Diaper Genie. 1.5421 0.03693 356 205 109 42
80 It was just some crumbs stuck in the release. What's your second one? 1.5411 0.03886 353 212 91 50
81 Well you see, Jimmy, this makes me feel modern and relevant and it scares the crap out of the cat. 1.5396 0.03948 341 205 88 48
82 Per the latest executive order, we're only allowed into the country if we live in American-made appliances. 1.5394 0.03909 343 205 91 47
83 Look, you want avocado on it, that's another wish. 1.5367 0.04280 259 149 81 29
84 Cash? You said bread. You didn't say anything about cash. 1.5345 0.03838 333 195 98 40
85 Dude, rub the microwave. You won't BELIEVE what happens! 1.5319 0.03702 329 187 109 33
86 The last guy rubbed me the wrong way 1.5296 0.04209 321 202 68 51
87 Excuse the unorthodox entrance, but the lamp has been unreliable ever since I upgraded it to Windows 10. 1.5294 0.04025 323 196 83 44
88 After 3 wishes you're toast! 1.5283 0.03950 318 189 90 39
89 Anything you'd like as long as it's toast. 1.5258 0.03974 310 184 89 37
90 You wanted a genius on the West Coast? I thought you said, 'genie who makes the best toast.' 1.5256 0.04058 312 189 82 41
91 Oh yeah.. I moved to a place with central heating. 1.5244 0.03785 307 175 103 29
92 It's fixable, but you'll need to use another wish to extend the warranty. 1.5244 0.04082 307 186 81 40
93 Are you sure this isn't a job for Mr. Coffee? 1.5201 0.03897 298 173 95 30
94 OK, toaster's fixed. Your second wish? 1.5201 0.04067 298 179 83 36
95 You know, all you had to do was plug it in... 1.5200 0.04074 300 181 82 37
96 It was a nasty divorce, and she got the lamp. 1.5186 0.04070 295 177 83 35
97 My wife is in the lamp, and I'll give you ten wishes NOT to rub it. 1.5186 0.04154 295 180 77 38
98 Hotter coffee, seriously? 1.5172 0.03853 290 166 98 26
99 Kid, I haven't lived in that thing in years. At my age, I need all the help I can get to pop up. 1.5170 0.03994 294 174 88 32
100 Toaster's fixed, but we should talk priorities. 1.5170 0.04023 294 175 86 33
101 You sure you don't want me to fix world hunger instead? 1.5125 0.04161 281 170 78 33
102 My wife got the lamp in the divorce. 1.5125 0.04281 281 174 70 37
103 My new place has two bedrooms, heat and an elevator. 1.5124 0.04108 283 170 81 32
104 Wait, you said Hampton Beach? I thought you said Hamilton Beach! 1.5107 0.04323 280 175 67 38
105 Wishes? No. Waffles? I got. 1.5092 0.04252 273 167 73 33
106 You have two more wishes, but you're out of counter space. 1.5091 0.03902 275 158 94 23
107 Let's think beyond household appliances for our third wish, shall we? 1.5074 0.04255 270 165 73 32
108 Here's your toaster and thank you for opening an account with The First Bank of Saudi Arabia. 1.5056 0.05196 180 110 49 21
109 You're getting nothing until I've had my coffee. 1.5055 0.05094 182 110 52 20
110 Trump is Toast,Jose...your next wish? 1.5038 0.04418 262 164 64 34
111 Okay, kid, the toaster is fixed. Now do yourself a favor and wish for an imagination. 1.5038 0.04528 266 171 56 39
112 Okay I fixed the toaster, what's next? 1.5000 0.04252 256 155 74 27
113 I decided to retire to a warmer place. 1.4980 0.04116 255 151 81 23
114 I made a move on Alexa and got shipped to the toaster 1.4980 0.04397 253 157 66 30
115 You have one wish and it had better be good, because otherwise I'm toast. 1.4980 0.04313 251 153 71 27
116 If you want more than one wish you're going to have to unplug me and plug me back in. 1.4960 0.04151 252 150 79 23
117 Toaster's fixed. What's your second wish? 1.4960 0.04314 248 151 71 26
118 I’ll grant you three wishes... four if you clean out that crumb tray. 1.4939 0.04156 245 145 79 21
119 I don't know where you got the idea of a genie in a magic lantern. It's simply more fake news. Just ask the guy in the coffee maker. 1.4939 0.04391 245 151 67 27
120 Give me my lamp back and I'll quit burning your toast. 1.4939 0.04429 245 152 65 28
121 I've relocated. The toaster has free internet. 1.4918 0.04480 244 153 62 29
122 I shall offer you three settings. 1.4917 0.04497 240 150 62 28
123 The last lady wished I was hotter. 1.4917 0.04379 240 147 68 25
124 Now try rubbing the coffee pot. 1.4915 0.04225 236 140 76 20
125 I love it! Two rooms and central heating?! When can I move in? 1.4896 0.04163 241 143 78 20
126 I got hacked. Your 3 wishes are with a blender in Moscow. 1.4895 0.04694 237 153 52 32
127 Forget that - help my sister - she's in the blender. 1.4895 0.04378 237 145 68 24
128 I'm the genie with the light brown toast. 1.4895 0.04578 237 150 58 29
129 Actually, I'm a Sikh. We don't grant wishes. 1.4873 0.04709 236 153 51 32
130 What, you were expecting Pop-Tarts? 1.4872 0.04377 234 143 68 23
131 I got transferred. 1.4872 0.04419 234 144 66 24
132 I was able to sweep out most of the crumbs, but you really ought to put a little more thought into your next wish. 1.4847 0.04489 229 142 63 24
133 Jeannie got the lantern in the divorce. 1.4847 0.04573 229 144 59 26
134 Sorry, Aladdin's on vacation. I'm his cousin, Amuffin. 1.4823 0.04488 226 140 63 23
135 I'd like to help but I'm burned out. 1.4823 0.04400 226 138 67 21
136 I'm going to stay in the toaster. Someone might think that's a Neti-pot. 1.4798 0.04875 223 147 45 31
137 If you rub the lamp I'm toast. 1.4798 0.04998 223 150 39 34
138 Okay, the toaster is clean. What is your second wish? 1.4769 0.04730 216 138 53 25
139 Sorry, weird night. Would you mind wishing for some coffee? 1.4747 0.04758 217 140 51 26
140 No. I'm Crusty. Genie is in the garage door. 1.4744 0.04836 215 140 48 27
141 Fixed it. Next wish? 1.4739 0.04522 211 130 62 19
142 Sorry, the only three wishes the toaster genie can grant are light, medium and dark. 1.4739 0.04996 211 140 42 29
143 It's just easier to pop out of the toaster. 1.4739 0.04212 211 124 74 13
144 Listen, kid. You got that lamp at the dollar store. I'll sleep where I want. 1.4714 0.04435 210 128 65 17
145 To be honest, I thought we were playing hide and go seek. 1.4689 0.05077 209 141 38 30
146 It was the only way I could get into the country. 1.4689 0.05031 209 140 40 29
147 I'll give you an extra wish if I can live in the coffee maker instead. 1.4686 0.04684 207 131 55 21
148 Square footage, central heating, and coffee next door. Win, win, win. 1.4683 0.04717 205 130 54 21
149 I'm like Alexa, but with more personality 1.4683 0.04456 205 125 64 16
150 Yeah, well you don't look like Larry Hagman either. 1.4683 0.04717 205 130 54 21
151 Please, please don't tell the lamp. The toaster means nothing to me. 1.4683 0.04767 205 131 52 22
152 She got the lamp in the divorce. 1.4683 0.04817 205 132 50 23
153 Had you taken the extended warranty, I could grant your wish. 1.4683 0.04510 205 126 62 17
154 The missus and I are going through a bit of a rough patch; this is only temporary. 1.4683 0.04717 205 130 54 21
155 You forgot to download the GPS update again, didn't you? 1.4683 0.04867 205 133 48 24
156 I grant you three settings. 1.4680 0.04647 203 127 57 19
157 Sorry, but even I can't figure out how to clean the crumbs out of this thing. 1.4680 0.04432 203 123 65 15
158 Would you mind rubbing the coffee pot so my wife can join us, too? 1.4680 0.04902 203 132 47 24
159 Nice place. It's even got an elevator. 1.4650 0.04587 200 124 59 17
160 Wishes, no, but I can offer three settings. 1.4646 0.04274 198 117 70 11
161 It's a new thing. I grant you 3 knishes. 1.4646 0.05095 198 132 40 26
162 You have three wishes so long as they involve white, whole wheat or rye. 1.4646 0.05044 198 131 42 25
163 Because no one wants to rub a toaster. 1.4646 0.04783 198 126 52 20
164 ICE never looks in the toaster. 1.4645 0.04886 183 115 51 17
165 Really Timmy a lamp..that's so thirteenth century 1.4615 0.04669 195 122 56 17
166 A bagel? Have you got the wrong genie! 1.4588 0.04569 194 120 59 15
167 ...but it's a dry heat 1.4583 0.04889 192 124 48 20
168 I've been moved from lamps to small appliances. 1.4583 0.04889 192 124 48 20
169 I'm retired. It's like Florida, but with a dry heat. 1.4579 0.04695 190 119 55 16
170 This is what happens when you waffle. 1.4550 0.04590 189 117 58 14
171 OK, fine, but if you think I'm screwed up try rubbing the Mr. Coffee. 1.4550 0.04711 189 119 54 16
172 I winter in the toaster. 1.4550 0.04651 189 118 56 15
173 I went electric in '65. 1.4550 0.04771 189 120 52 17
174 Well, you certainly wasted the first one. 1.4545 0.05040 187 123 43 21
175 The Pop Tarts count for two wishes, technically. 1.4541 0.04963 185 120 46 19
176 May I remind you your next two wishes do NOT have to be toast related? 1.4514 0.04703 175 108 55 12
177 I can't fix it either. 1.4511 0.05099 184 122 41 21
178 Sorry, kid. I'm the G.E.nie. 1.4511 0.04982 184 120 45 19
179 I don't do the lamp anymore, kid. I'm now part of the Internet of Things. 1.4511 0.04737 184 116 53 15
180 I'm not going to ask why you were rubbing the toaster. 1.4511 0.04922 184 119 47 18
181 When was the last time you cleaned that thing? 1.4511 0.04799 184 117 51 16
182 Oh, for goodness sake. My grandfather has been looking for that. 1.4500 0.04745 180 113 53 14
183 Sorry for the delay, I had a date with a pop tart. 1.4500 0.05242 180 121 37 22
184 Yeah, but it's a dry heat. 1.4500 0.04810 180 114 51 15
185 Sorry, the only wishes I can grant are "light," "medium" or "dark." 1.4500 0.05183 180 120 39 21
186 I think you just burned your last wish. 1.4469 0.04956 179 116 46 17
187 2 rooms and heat's included 1.4463 0.04996 177 115 45 17
188 Genie-ology wasn't my strong suit. Your results may vary. 1.4463 0.04865 177 113 49 15
189 Its three choices, not three wishes.... White, Whole Wheat or Pumpernickel... 1.4457 0.05036 175 114 44 17
190 OK bagels will never get stuck in the toaster again. What is your second wish? 1.4457 0.05036 175 114 44 17
191 Toaster's fixed. But the fridge needs a large appliance genie. 1.4457 0.05036 175 114 44 17
192 Unfortunately, with that lantern, instead of getting three wishes you get three appliances. 1.4457 0.04971 175 113 46 16
193 That was your last wish...I'm toast. 1.4457 0.05165 175 116 40 19
194 For the third one, I'd suggest a blender or possibly a juicer. 1.4425 0.05055 174 114 43 17
195 Toast is done. Coffee is brewing. You got one wish left... 1.4425 0.04715 174 109 53 12
196 Sorry, I can only grant wishes that are gluten free. 1.4425 0.05249 174 117 37 20
197 No, I'm not here to grant a wish. You were about to burn your toast. 1.4419 0.04752 172 108 52 12
198 Just gonna' lay low here until this Muslim ban blows over. 1.4419 0.05164 172 114 40 18
199 Sorry kid, I got this sponsor years ago. Now I'm a GEnie! 1.4419 0.05097 172 113 42 17
200 Sorry kid, your wishes are toast. 1.4412 0.04862 170 108 49 13
201 Why do you think we're all brown? 1.4412 0.05340 170 115 35 20
202 You have three wishes, light, medium or burnt 1.4412 0.05274 170 114 37 19
203 Don’t ask. Just make three wishes before I’m toast. 1.4412 0.05274 170 114 37 19
204 This thing works like magic. 1.4412 0.04717 170 106 53 11
205 You called the Internet of Things, Master? 1.4412 0.05003 170 110 45 15
206 Wish granted! You are now the toast of the town. 1.4379 0.05228 169 113 38 18
207 Sorry. That model is no longer supported. 1.4379 0.05091 169 111 42 16
208 It's a tight fit at breakfast, but other than that, I prefer it over the lamp. 1.4371 0.04846 167 106 49 12
209 It's a trick I learned from Mr. Coffee. 1.4364 0.05034 165 107 44 14
210 No, No not three wishes. Your choices are light, dark, or burnt. 1.4364 0.05457 165 113 32 20
211 The travel ban makes it impossible to come in a lamp. 1.4364 0.05320 165 111 36 18
212 Just to clarify...you can have three wishes, but you can still only have 2 slices of toast. 1.4364 0.04960 165 106 46 13
213 You coulda had a fourth wish, but nooooo, you wouldn't wish me a cup of coffee. 1.4364 0.05107 165 108 42 15
214 Since the divorce, I live in the toaster. 1.4364 0.05034 165 107 44 14
215 The last guy rubbed me the wrong way 1.4364 0.05250 165 110 38 17
216 It's clear of crumbs, but maybe aim a little higher with the next two. 1.4364 0.05179 165 109 40 16
217 Actually, I'm the one that opens the garage door. 1.4364 0.05107 165 108 42 15
218 I’m not the only one in this office you’ve rubbed the wrong way 1.4364 0.05320 165 111 36 18
219 It's Gene actually. 1.4329 0.04903 164 105 47 12
220 Sorry, kid, Mr. Coffee and I have been living a lie. 1.4321 0.05097 162 106 42 14
221 Get with the times kid no one uses those anymore. 1.4312 0.04986 160 103 45 12
222 That bagel is really jammed. Next wish? 1.4312 0.04907 160 102 47 11
223 I will grant you three settings. 1.4312 0.04986 160 103 45 12
224 Mid-Century Modern, radiant heating, skylights: look, I was ready for a change. 1.4312 0.05064 160 104 43 13
225 I'll grant you three wishes: light, dark, and bagel. 1.4312 0.05217 160 106 39 15
226 I prefer the space of a double-wide. 1.4268 0.05207 157 104 39 14
227 Master, you've blown 2 wishes on crap you could've gotten opening an account at First Federal. 1.4268 0.05512 157 108 31 18
228 You get three wishes: Light, Medium , and Dark 1.4267 0.05703 150 104 28 18
229 When is the last time time the crumb tray was emptied? 1.4258 0.05174 155 102 40 13
230 Sorry, dude, Alexa already made three wishes. 1.4258 0.04925 155 99 46 10
231 some people rub me the wrong way ! 1.4258 0.05564 155 107 30 18
232 I can offer white, wheat, or rye. Coffee is the next wish over. 1.4231 0.05306 156 105 36 15
233 The rent's cheaper and it's a two bedroom. 1.4231 0.04985 156 101 44 11
234 I’m guessing you didn’t receive my change of address notification. 1.4231 0.05148 156 103 40 13
235 No, I'm Arabian...the Colombian Genie is in the coffee pot. 1.4211 0.05158 152 100 40 12
236 It sure beats being the diaper genie. 1.4211 0.05485 152 104 32 16
237 Now we know. "Abracadabra" won't fix the toaster. 1.4211 0.05072 152 99 42 11
238 Oh, the painters are in my lamp all week. 1.4200 0.04848 150 95 47 8
239 It's my retirement condo. It's got heat and an elevator! 1.4200 0.05290 150 100 37 13
240 Greetings! You have three knishes. 1.4200 0.05456 150 102 33 15
241 I've been trying different platforms. 1.4189 0.05253 148 98 38 12
242 The Genii-of-the-lamp is on vacation, however I can grant you any three wishes, as long as they are about toast. 1.4189 0.05164 148 97 40 11
243 I don't do lamps anymore, kid. Download the smart toaster app and make your dreams come true. 1.4189 0.05253 148 98 38 12
244 When you wished your mom wouldn't burn your toast...that counts. 1.4189 0.05164 148 97 40 11
245 Hi. My name is Gene and I'll be your server today. 1.4189 0.05253 148 98 38 12
246 Seriously, you really want me to hang out in there to see who's taking your waffles? 1.4150 0.05361 147 99 35 13
247 Okay but are you honestly that lazy? 1.4150 0.05447 147 100 33 14
248 This is temporary. I'm airbnbing my place for the weekend. 1.4150 0.05001 147 95 43 9
249 Not genie, GE 1.4138 0.05323 145 97 36 12
250 Rub me wrong again and you're toast. 1.4138 0.05587 145 100 30 15
251 When you said you had a toasty double unit my thinking was something in West Palm. 1.4138 0.05323 145 97 36 12
252 I've been up for 1001 nights. I need a lot of coffee before any wish-granting. 1.4138 0.05233 145 96 38 11
253 Viennese bakery just down the block and YOU wish for a goddamned toaster strudel? 1.4138 0.05323 145 97 36 12
254 No, I'm Joe from appliances. 1.4138 0.05413 145 98 34 13
255 The crumbs are gone. What's your last wish? 1.4138 0.05233 145 96 38 11
256 I flipped the lamp and I've sublet the toaster. I'll be crashing in the coffee pot until I find a new place. 1.4138 0.05413 145 98 34 13
257 For that wish you'll need the guy in the coffee maker. 1.4126 0.04995 143 92 43 8
258 Who's the brunette in the coffeemaker? 1.4126 0.05815 143 101 25 17
259 You're absolutely sure that your final wish is a blender? 1.4126 0.05465 143 97 33 13
260 Sorry, couldn't fix it. Any other wishes? 1.4126 0.05375 143 96 35 12
261 Nah, I'm good in here, but I bet the Diaper Genie would be willing to move. 1.4126 0.05555 143 98 31 14
262 Sorry, I was working on my tan. 1.4126 0.05465 143 97 33 13
263 You could always wish for toast. 1.4113 0.05333 141 94 36 11
264 I can give you anything except rich, bold taste without the bitterness. 1.4097 0.05065 144 94 41 9
265 Listen kid. Don't rub me the wrong way! 1.4097 0.05947 144 104 21 19
266 Your wish is my command, as long as it's plain, whole wheat, or gluten-free. 1.4087 0.06163 115 79 25 11
267 You're really using your final wish on avocado toast? 1.4071 0.05450 140 95 33 12
268 When you said 'sesame' , did you not mean toast. 1.4071 0.05726 140 98 27 15
269 Wake up, kid. It's the 21st century. Think outside the lamp! 1.4071 0.05450 140 95 33 12
270 Somebody rubbed me the wrong way. 1.4058 0.05876 138 98 24 16
271 Abracadabread? 1.4058 0.05504 138 94 32 12
272 If you try and wish for infinite wishes, I swear to god, I'm throwing myself in the bathtub. 1.4058 0.05693 138 96 28 14
273 Coming from a lamp is so last millennium. 1.4058 0.05599 138 95 30 13
274 You used up your wishes Donald. You are young, have a full head of hair and Mueller is off your tail. Now leave me alone. 1.4044 0.05753 136 95 27 14
275 You have one of three wishes... light, dark, or English muffin 1.4044 0.05753 136 95 27 14
276 You're beginning to rub me the wrong way. 1.4044 0.06030 136 98 21 17
277 Then she said to me, "If you let him win in November, you're toast." 1.4044 0.05847 136 96 25 15
278 You'll never guess who's in the coffee maker! 1.4044 0.05461 136 92 33 11
279 You were expecting maybe Mr. Coffee? 1.4044 0.05153 136 89 39 8
280 I unstuck the bagel,kid. You have two more wishes. 1.4035 0.05672 114 75 32 7
281 Because it has skylights, double beds, integrated heating AND a two-year warranty. 1.4030 0.05617 134 92 30 12
282 Thanks. That place was crummy 1.4030 0.05910 134 95 24 15
283 Frankly, you rub me the wrong way. 1.4030 0.05910 134 95 24 15
284 You wish I were a waffle? 1.4030 0.05716 134 93 28 13
285 Is it me, or is it hot in here? 1.4030 0.05617 134 92 30 12
286 Your toaster has been hacked. 1.4030 0.04982 134 86 42 6
287 Okay, it's clean. I can't believe you wasted a wish on that. 1.3985 0.05112 133 87 39 7
288 Sorry - two slots, two wishes. 1.3985 0.05540 133 91 31 11
289 One bagel. Sliced. Toasted. Cream cheese. That's already four wishes. 1.3985 0.05330 133 89 35 9
290 Thanks, kid. I thought I was toast! 1.3969 0.05598 131 90 30 11
291 Yeah, but this new place has central heating! 1.3969 0.05492 131 89 32 10
292 You get three wishes--four, if you clean the crap out of my toaster. 1.3969 0.06002 131 94 22 15
293 Ever since Alexa dumped me I've been living in the toaster. 1.3969 0.05904 131 93 24 14
294 I don't do wishes, I do breakfast. What'll it be? 1.3969 0.05273 131 87 36 8
295 You rubbed the "toast" app. For wishes you'll have to download the "Aladdin" app 1.3969 0.05492 131 89 32 10
296 You were expecting an Open Sesame bagel??? 1.3969 0.05384 131 88 34 9
297 Don't feel bad. My GPS is on the fritz. Yesterday l came out of the shower head. 1.3969 0.05598 131 90 30 11
298 Your last wish is toast!? 1.3969 0.05904 131 93 24 14
299 A thoughtful wish, master, but really the lamp is fine. 1.3969 0.05273 131 87 36 8
300 I also respond to "open sesame bagel". 1.3969 0.05701 131 91 28 12
301 You've got your toaster and your coffee machine. What'll the third wish be? 1.3969 0.05161 131 86 38 7
302 I'd love to help you, but I'm a little burnt out. 1.3969 0.05701 131 91 28 12
303 Ok, I've done it. Your parents are toast. 1.3969 0.05804 131 92 26 13
304 The toaster is my winter home. 1.3969 0.05384 131 88 34 9
305 It's part of the new two-step authentication process. 1.3969 0.05384 131 88 34 9
306 You didn't expect me to pop up just anywhere, did you? 1.3969 0.05384 131 88 34 9
307 Always wishes! What about your needs? 1.3969 0.05046 131 85 40 6
308 Thanks for finding an oil lamp. The toaster is no place for a genie. 1.3953 0.05438 129 87 33 9
309 How about one wish and I throw in the coffee maker and the toaster? 1.3953 0.05211 129 85 37 7
310 You should try the coffee machine next, I hear he gives out five wishes. 1.3937 0.05380 127 85 34 8
311 I upgraded to a double-wide. 1.3937 0.05262 127 84 36 7
312 white, wheat, or rye? 1.3937 0.05262 127 84 36 7
313 I switched to the toaster 'cause ICE tracked me to your lamp! 1.3937 0.05380 127 85 34 8
314 Rub the lamp, quick, or I'm toast! 1.3937 0.05826 127 89 26 12
315 Sorry, kid, I can't figure out what the dial does either. 1.3937 0.05495 127 86 32 9
316 Sorry, you phone is really wedged in there. You are going to have to tell your parents. 1.3937 0.05607 127 87 30 10
317 I traded for a two-bedroom with heating. 1.3889 0.04908 126 81 41 4
318 So worth the move. It's twice the square footage, has two skylights, and includes central heat! 1.3889 0.05743 126 88 27 11
319 New place has a heater. 1.3889 0.05631 126 87 29 10
320 Ok, that was different. Now you have two wishes left. 1.3889 0.05743 126 88 27 11
321 Okay, the toaster's fixed. You have two more wishes. 1.3889 0.05401 126 85 33 8
322 Wealth? Fame? World Peace? And you wasted a wish on a stuck onion bagel?! 1.3889 0.05517 126 86 31 9
323 Look, you got the lamp on eBay, what did you expect? 1.3889 0.05852 126 89 25 12
324 Your dad's keys are in his blue jacket. 1.3889 0.05517 126 86 31 9
325 OK; I got that bagel out of there for you. Two more wishes. 1.3889 0.05517 126 86 31 9
326 Because your mom used it to make tea! 1.3889 0.05517 126 86 31 9
327 You wished for a hot genie, young master? 1.3889 0.05852 126 89 25 12
328 Dude, lamps are SO twelfth century. 1.3889 0.05852 126 89 25 12
329 You wished for less dependence on oil 1.3889 0.05282 126 84 35 7
330 I distinctly said: "three knishes. 1.3871 0.05806 124 87 26 11
331 You wish to make French Toast in that? Do I look French to you? 1.3871 0.05806 124 87 26 11
332 As genies go, I'm more mid-century modern. 1.3871 0.05576 124 85 30 9
333 The new password is open sesame, wheat or white. 1.3871 0.05692 124 86 28 10
334 I winter in the toaster. 1.3871 0.05692 124 86 28 10
335 I'm a pop-up genie. 1.3852 0.05755 122 85 27 10
336 I see the confusion. I was offering to make thou sandwiches, not make thousand wishes. 1.3833 0.05939 120 85 24 11
337 It's about time. I thought I was toast. 1.3833 0.06056 120 86 22 12
338 You want rye or wheat? 1.3833 0.05820 120 84 26 10
339 Sorry, I was just getting warmed up. 1.3833 0.05317 120 80 34 6
340 It happens, what can I say? If you think this is weird, try rubbing the coffee maker! 1.3833 0.05317 120 80 34 6
341 This toaster works like magic! 1.3833 0.05698 120 83 28 9
342 Heat's included in the rent, and I can grab a coffee next door. 1.3833 0.05317 120 80 34 6
343 No more lamp for me--that's the first place ICE would look. 1.3833 0.06170 120 87 20 13
344 I'm not going back. I found a two bedroom. 1.3833 0.05939 120 85 24 11
345 I can't get the damn English muffin out of there either! 1.3821 0.05599 123 85 29 9
346 Suggest using your last wish to avoid back pain in adulthood. 1.3821 0.05945 123 88 23 12
347 Maybe wish for another outlet? 1.3821 0.05356 123 83 33 7
348 Suprised? You should see who lives in the coffee maker. 1.3821 0.06056 123 89 21 13
349 You have three wishes or two toasted bagels: your choice. 1.3821 0.05479 123 84 31 8
350 How did you get from the lamp not working to rubbing the toaster? 1.3814 0.05372 118 79 33 6
351 There's more room in here, and I like the twin skylights. 1.3814 0.05372 118 79 33 6
352 I finally found a duplex. 1.3814 0.06360 118 87 17 14
353 You may open sesame, but you may also open poppyseed or cinnamon-raisin. 1.3814 0.06128 118 85 21 12
354 I'm old. I need the pop-up feature. 1.3814 0.05635 118 81 29 8
355 Come up with three wishes quick, or I'm toast. 1.3761 0.05913 117 83 24 10
356 Well to be honest, I was also waiting for Iraq to be taken off Trump's banned country list. 1.3761 0.05787 117 82 26 9
357 You can rub my toaster all you want. Just don't put a fork in it. 1.3761 0.06157 117 85 20 12
358 One organic crostini with non-GMO ricotta. When I was your age, I wished they could all be California girls. 1.3761 0.06276 117 86 18 13
359 Sorry, I was just working on my tan. 1.3761 0.05787 117 82 26 9
360 You get three choices - light, medium or dark. 1.3761 0.05787 117 82 26 9
361 One more wish and I'm toast. 1.3761 0.05787 117 82 26 9
362 Yes, master, I ate your pop tarts. 1.3761 0.05658 117 81 28 8
363 Siri's busy. Can I take your order? 1.3739 0.05722 115 80 27 8
364 You can put that up for sale ... I just closed the deal on this 2 bedroom with heat next to the coffee shop. 1.3739 0.05983 115 82 23 10
365 Lower rent, electric heat... 1.3739 0.05587 115 79 29 7
366 Okay, I found your baseball glove and fixed your toaster. What's your third wish? 1.3739 0.05854 115 81 25 9
367 Your bagel is almost done. Now let me explain the concept of three wishes. 1.3739 0.05854 115 81 25 9
368 Your wish is no longer my concern. 1.3739 0.05983 115 82 23 10
369 You think this is weird, you should see what comes out of the garbage disposal. 1.3739 0.05587 115 79 29 7
370 I'm here to grant you three settings. 1.3739 0.05722 115 80 27 8
371 You have three wishes: Rye, whole wheat or English muffin? 1.3739 0.05587 115 79 29 7
372 I’ve decided to go electric. 1.3739 0.05983 115 82 23 10
373 First, how bout I grant you a knish? 1.3739 0.05854 115 81 25 9
374 Before you start, mind if I grab a cup? 1.3739 0.05983 115 82 23 10
375 Look, nobody can get those crumbs out. Just wish for a new one. 1.3739 0.05587 115 79 29 7
376 You may wish for one more appliance, and please show some style this time. 1.3739 0.05449 115 78 31 6
377 Did you ask to see a genie in a toaster or a bikini in a roadster? 1.3739 0.06354 115 85 17 13
378 Thanks! After Siri I thought I was toast! 1.3739 0.06109 115 83 21 11
379 YOU wish? I wish you'd clean out the @#$% crumb tray! 1.3739 0.06109 115 83 21 11
380 Let's not blow through all three of these before 7am. 1.3739 0.05161 115 76 35 4
381 Yes, the new kitchen appliances ARE thoughtful. But if I were you, I wouldn't tell your family that's where their 3 wishes went... 1.3739 0.05587 115 79 29 7
382 Have you seen my other earring? 1.3739 0.05854 115 81 25 9
383 So, your wish is to give your parents a heart attack during breakfast? 1.3717 0.05922 113 80 24 9
384 So, smart ass, when your first wish is for a thousand wishes, your second wish for a hot tub and a tanning bed looks like this. 1.3717 0.06434 113 84 16 13
385 I am your toastmaster. 1.3717 0.05649 113 78 28 7
386 ...and you can't wish for K-cups. 1.3717 0.05362 113 76 32 5
387 After I got fired, Mr. Coffee turned me on to this Toast Master gig. 1.3717 0.06054 113 81 22 10
388 Three wishes and you asked for toast? 1.3694 0.06128 111 80 21 10
389 You should see the perky little genie that lives in the coffee pot. 1.3694 0.06261 111 81 19 11
390 Oil prices were killing me 1.3694 0.05993 111 79 23 9
391 You know you've always rubbed me the wrong way. 1.3694 0.05568 111 76 29 6
392 It was just a fuse. What’s your last wish? 1.3694 0.05568 111 76 29 6
393 This one comes with central heating 1.3694 0.06128 111 80 21 10
394 Gluten free counts as a separate wish 1.3694 0.06517 111 83 15 13
395 We've been hacked! 1.3694 0.05713 111 77 27 7
396 I upgraded to a home appliance. 1.3694 0.05993 111 79 23 9
397 I had to move in here. HR had complaints about the "rubbing" thing. 1.3670 0.06066 109 78 22 9
398 Sorry kid, the travel ban has forced me to pretend I'm whitebread. 1.3670 0.06205 109 79 20 10
399 You're rubbing me the wrong way 1.3670 0.06340 109 80 18 11
400 Forget your 2 pieces of toast and 3 wishes, this thing here can pump out 12 cups of primo, fair-trade, organic brew! 1.3670 0.05478 109 74 30 5
401 You could wish for a cleaning lady instead. 1.3670 0.06066 109 78 22 9
402 You still get three wishes but the first two are toast. 1.3670 0.06340 109 80 18 11
403 Sorry, but you have to pay for your three wishes. I'm on the grid now. 1.3670 0.05779 109 76 26 7
404 Your third wish is for a microwave? Really? Ever hear of Walmart? 1.3670 0.05925 109 77 24 8
405 This toaster shall never again burn a bagel. Second wish? 1.3670 0.05631 109 75 28 6
406 The avocados get put on afterwards! Don't make me clean this up again. 1.3670 0.05779 109 76 26 7
407 Okay, I fixed the toaster and the coffee maker, you have one wish left. 1.3670 0.05779 109 76 26 7
408 Turns out I can't do anything about the crumbs. 1.3670 0.05925 109 77 24 8
409 You've had your wishes, kid. Give the lamp to the cheerleader next door and I'll cancel school today. 1.3670 0.05925 109 77 24 8
410 Wishes? No, but you get three settings. 1.3670 0.05925 109 77 24 8
411 Where did you finally find the lamp? 1.3670 0.05158 109 72 34 3
412 You have to butter me up first. 1.3670 0.05631 109 75 28 6
413 Your wish comes with a side order of toast. 1.3670 0.05925 109 77 24 8
414 Couldn't you wish for something besides toast? 1.3670 0.05779 109 76 26 7
415 Sorry, but the Poptart people made me a better offer. 1.3670 0.05631 109 75 28 6
416 I only appear to those who don't block pop-ups. 1.3670 0.06205 109 79 20 10
417 You're kidding. You want me to trade this spacious, mid-century modern with radiant heating for that? 1.3670 0.05779 109 76 26 7
418 Seriously? You chose Bagel? 1.3670 0.06340 109 80 18 11
419 No, but I can grant a lifetime supply of everything bagels. 1.3670 0.05779 109 76 26 7
420 Who you gonna call? Toast Busters! 1.3645 0.05695 107 74 27 6
421 You get to ask for one more appliance... 1.3645 0.05848 107 75 25 7
422 Just a tip - if you keep rubbing that thing, you might go blind. 1.3636 0.06422 110 82 16 12
423 Oh yeah? Wait until you see what's in the teapot. 1.3611 0.05803 108 76 25 7
424 I was Mr. Coffee before I was Mr. Genie 1.3611 0.05497 108 74 29 5
425 It's roomier and has radiant heat throughout. 1.3611 0.06094 108 78 21 9
426 This is the crumbiest place I've ever had to stay. 1.3611 0.05950 108 77 23 8
427 I'm better than Alexa. I grant wishes and make toast. 1.3611 0.05652 108 75 27 6
428 Your equipment is obsolete; we automatically upgraded you. 1.3611 0.06234 108 79 19 10
429 Your mom wanted me to remind you to get bread. 1.3611 0.05950 108 77 23 8
430 You get the standard three wishes. I have white, rye, pumpernickel, sourdough, Eggos... 1.3611 0.05652 108 75 27 6
431 I am the G-E-nie. 1.3611 0.05803 108 76 25 7
432 I got seduced by a sweet tart 1.3611 0.05803 108 76 25 7
433 Sorry. I heard ICE has been raiding the lamps. 1.3611 0.06234 108 79 19 10
434 'No, I do gluten free toast. You want Pumpkin Spice Latte, Al's in the coffee pot.' 1.3611 0.05950 108 77 23 8
435 Get me out of this thing, and I'll grant you four. 1.3611 0.05337 108 73 31 4
436 The AirBNB description made it sound so much more hip than living in a lantern. 1.3611 0.05803 108 76 25 7
437 Three wishes would be nice, kid, but trust me--it's wheat dishes. 1.3611 0.07018 108 85 7 16
438 Why, the toaster? I am getting old and the pop-up feature gets me out quicker, easer, and with less stress. 1.3611 0.05497 108 74 29 5
439 So that's how Aladdin's Lamps got bought out by GE. 1.3611 0.05337 108 73 31 4
440 Hurry, make a wish or I'm toast! 1.3611 0.05950 108 77 23 8
441 You're the first person to wish for a bagel setting. 1.3585 0.05872 106 75 24 7
442 The toaster had wi-fi. 1.3585 0.06170 106 77 20 9
443 Sorry, kid. I'm moving into this new place soon as I get the bread. 1.3585 0.05872 106 75 24 7
444 Call Alexa, she is my master now. 1.3585 0.06023 106 76 22 8
445 Are you sure you want your second wish to be another piece of toast? 1.3585 0.06170 106 77 20 9
446 I don't know if watching me come out of appliances is the best use of your wishes. 1.3585 0.06314 106 78 18 10
447 I don't make the rules, man. Two slice toaster gets you two wishes. Take it or leave it. 1.3585 0.05558 106 73 28 5
448 NOW who's the stereotype? 1.3585 0.05558 106 73 28 5
449 Wish all you want about size, but I only do toast. 1.3585 0.05394 106 72 30 4
450 No. I'm not Mr. Coffee. 1.3585 0.06170 106 77 20 9
451 I updated my appliances. Get over it. 1.3585 0.05394 106 72 30 4
452 Ok. I've fixed your toaster. Now on to your two other wishes. 1.3585 0.05558 106 73 28 5
453 Sorry. You caught me at breakfast. 1.3585 0.06170 106 77 20 9
454 We're in Omaha, the best I can do is Lender's. 1.3585 0.06170 106 77 20 9
455 It's actually pretty crumby in there. 1.3578 0.06047 109 79 21 9
456 Open sesame bagel? 1.3578 0.05905 109 78 23 8
457 You get two more wishes along with your order of toast. 1.3578 0.05135 109 73 33 3
458 It's all part of a '21st century relevance' upgrade from IT. You're now holding the remote. 1.3578 0.06047 109 79 21 9
459 It's only a two-wish toaster. 1.3558 0.05943 104 74 23 7
460 Thanks, I thought I was toast. 1.3558 0.06541 104 78 15 11
461 Well, yeah, technically I live in the lamp but I shower in the coffee pot and sauna in the toaster. Why? 1.3558 0.05943 104 74 23 7
462 Rub that lamp again and you're toast! 1.3558 0.05943 104 74 23 7
463 It's about time -- who did you think was burning your toast every day? 1.3558 0.05784 104 73 25 6
464 The toaster is fixed. You have one remaining wish. 1.3558 0.05620 104 72 27 5
465 OK, two more wishes. Put some thought into these, OK? 1.3545 0.05568 110 77 27 6
466 What do you mean, "while you're here"? You want another appliance checked, use another wish. 1.3529 0.05685 102 71 26 5
467 You have to push the lever when you need me now. 1.3529 0.05853 102 72 24 6
468 Did I hear you correctly? You just want me to wait in here and say hi to your father tomorrow morning? 1.3529 0.06017 102 73 22 7
469 Sorry, but your Mom said no pop-tarts. 1.3500 0.05925 100 71 23 6
470 This is what happens when you rub me the wrong way. 1.3500 0.05573 100 69 27 4
471 Sorry, but your Mom is on her new yacht and won't be back. But hey, her third wish was that I take care of you. You want some coffee? 1.3500 0.06093 100 72 21 7
472 You got the wonder. You didn't get the bread. 1.3500 0.06256 100 73 19 8
473 You're desired shade of toast is my command. 1.3500 0.05198 100 67 31 2
474 I think I'll go back in the lamp. It's crummy in there. 1.3500 0.06256 100 73 19 8
475 it's warmer than the lamp and drier than the coffee pot. 1.3500 0.05925 100 71 23 6
476 I had to move . . . you keep making tea in my house. 1.3500 0.06256 100 73 19 8
477 I am with the bank. we want the toaster back. 1.3500 0.06872 100 77 11 12
478 What? Your final wish was to remove the Trumps, not the crumbs? 1.3500 0.05752 100 70 25 5
479 I've Upgraded. It has an elevator. 1.3500 0.06093 100 72 21 7
480 Plain, rye, or whole wheat? 1.3500 0.06723 100 76 13 11
481 Oh, you can find racial and ethnic diversity amongst The New Yorker cartoon characters, but I'm afraid we're still all typecast. 1.3500 0.06256 100 73 19 8
482 Thanks, kid. I thought I was toast! 1.3500 0.05752 100 70 25 5
483 I'm sorry, Master. I still do not have enough power to prevent the Cartoon Editors from picking lame and toothless Caption Finalists. 1.3500 0.06256 100 73 19 8
484 I won't go back. My new place has all the modern amenities. 1.3500 0.05752 100 70 25 5
485 What? You were expecting Barbara Eden? 1.3500 0.05925 100 71 23 6
486 You have three wishes: toast, bagel, or frozen waffles! 1.3500 0.06093 100 72 21 7
487 My slippers get mildewy in the lamp. Also, the light's better. 1.3500 0.06416 100 74 17 9
488 Smart home. Alexa controls the lamp now. 1.3500 0.05573 100 69 27 4
489 Donald Trump is a jackass. 1.3500 0.06571 100 75 15 10
490 What, Genies aren't allowed to embrace technology? 1.3469 0.05998 98 70 22 6
491 I cleaned it, but I really think you wasted that wish. 1.3469 0.05820 98 69 24 5
492 This is my winter home. 1.3469 0.05820 98 69 24 5
493 You mind if I stay here instead? I’m old pals with Mr. Coffee. 1.3469 0.05447 98 67 28 3
494 Are you kidding? The light is much better and the radiator is amazing! 1.3469 0.05637 98 68 26 4
495 I dreamed of Genie with a light brown crust 1.3469 0.05820 98 69 24 5
496 Sorry, I can't get the toaster working. Did you have another wish? 1.3469 0.06503 98 73 16 9
497 I was just working on my tan. 1.3469 0.06503 98 73 16 9
498 I can grant you three settings. 1.3469 0.06340 98 72 18 8
499 Upgrade me to a toaster oven and I’ll get you an espresso machine. 1.3469 0.06171 98 71 20 7
500 Thank you for freeing me Master! Being trapped in a toaster was very crummy... 1.3469 0.05820 98 69 24 5
501 That's my winter home; its nice and toasty in there. 1.3469 0.05447 98 67 28 3
502 So now you want me to magically appear from out of the coffeemaker. Kid, you know you only have two wishes left, right? 1.3469 0.05998 98 70 22 6
503 Nah I'm good. I get wifi in this thing. 1.3469 0.06340 98 72 18 8
504 Its previous owner was rubbing me the wrong way. 1.3469 0.06503 98 73 16 9
505 Business has been slow because of the whole 'no-carb' thing. 1.3469 0.06340 98 72 18 8
506 I grant 'wiches now. 1.3469 0.06503 98 73 16 9
507 Kid, I think you rubbed me the wrong way. 1.3469 0.05820 98 69 24 5
508 You have three wishes; light, medium and dark. 1.3469 0.05998 98 70 22 6
509 Maytag's outsourced just about everything. 1.3469 0.05447 98 67 28 3
510 Sorry, young man. The genie in the lantern grants you three wishes. From me, you get toast. 1.3469 0.05820 98 69 24 5
511 I can check if it’s still under warranty, but that counts as a wish. 1.3469 0.06340 98 72 18 8
512 Electric is much cheaper than oil. 1.3469 0.06340 98 72 18 8
513 Now, you must wash three dishes. 1.3469 0.06340 98 72 18 8
514 My people emigrated from lanterns to toasters during the Industrial Revolution. 1.3469 0.05820 98 69 24 5
515 Sorry, Mr. Coffee retired. 1.3469 0.06503 98 73 16 9
516 I WISH you'd polish something else for a change! 1.3465 0.06204 101 74 19 8
517 I like to play the slots. 1.3465 0.06204 101 74 19 8
518 Sorry kid, cream cheese for the bagel counts as a 2nd wish. 1.3438 0.06075 96 69 21 6
519 I'm the new, product identified G-E-nie! 1.3438 0.06075 96 69 21 6
520 I only do toast wishes. You need a different lamp for the coffee guy. 1.3438 0.06075 96 69 21 6
521 Sorry, I'm on another job. The guy next door wants poptarts. 1.3438 0.06253 96 70 19 7
522 That's the classiest coffee maker you could wish for? 1.3438 0.05892 96 68 23 5
523 Alexa's on break. What can I toast for you? 1.3438 0.06075 96 69 21 6
524 Its a much more comfortable space and I can get a tan at the same time. 1.3438 0.05702 96 67 25 4
525 Sorry kid, you rub me the wrong way. 1.3438 0.06594 96 72 15 9
526 Remember, unplug before you try to get me out. 1.3438 0.06253 96 70 19 7
527 But my current place has central heating. 1.3438 0.05892 96 68 23 5
528 Can't do anything without my morning coffee . 1.3438 0.06075 96 69 21 6
529 I've fixed your toaster. With your remaining two wishes, I can fix the coffee maker and dishwasher. I guess you're already rich and famous? 1.3438 0.05892 96 68 23 5
530 But I can grant you three Pop-Tarts. 1.3438 0.05892 96 68 23 5
531 You are telling me I need to go through Homeland Security??? 1.3438 0.06594 96 72 15 9
532 Aladdin's lamp is so yesterday. What can Ahmed's toaster do for you? 1.3438 0.06253 96 70 19 7
533 Three wishes then you're toast! 1.3438 0.06253 96 70 19 7
534 Good news, 2 pieces of toast only counts as 1 wish. 1.3438 0.05702 96 67 25 4
535 To be honest, you rub me the wrong way. 1.3438 0.06594 96 72 15 9
536 The toaster is roomier but the climate is too volatile 1.3438 0.05702 96 67 25 4
537 I'm sorry, but I couldn't get the bagel out. 1.3438 0.06253 96 70 19 7
538 But it's warmer here and the rent is cheaper. 1.3404 0.05770 94 66 24 4
539 Avocado? Really? 1.3404 0.06688 94 71 14 9
540 Yes, I can give you three wishes. But only two slices of toast. 1.3404 0.06337 94 69 18 7
541 If you rub the coffee pot, Joe DiMaggio will grant you three wishes. 1.3404 0.06337 94 69 18 7
542 Actually, you get two wishes and a toasted bialy with a schmear. 1.3404 0.06154 94 68 20 6
543 Sorry -- we needed the extra room for the baby. 1.3404 0.05770 94 66 24 4
544 No wishes, but how about two pieces of toast? 1.3404 0.05359 94 64 28 2
545 Not your parents' genie, kid. 1.3404 0.06337 94 69 18 7
546 I needed to relocate to a warmer climate 1.3404 0.05359 94 64 28 2
547 I've relocated to a warmer climate 1.3404 0.05770 94 66 24 4
548 The lamp? In February? No, no. I spend my winters in the toaster. 1.3404 0.06337 94 69 18 7
549 Sorry kid. Your retainer's not in here either. What's your last wish? 1.3404 0.06337 94 69 18 7
550 You should see the guy who comes out of the coffee maker. 1.3404 0.06515 94 70 16 8
551 Khan Edison at your service. 1.3404 0.06337 94 69 18 7
552 You need to start thinking outside the lamp. 1.3404 0.06154 94 68 20 6
553 As soon as the leaves change I come here for the season. 1.3404 0.05770 94 66 24 4
554 Didn't you receive my change of address notification? 1.3404 0.06337 94 69 18 7
555 If you've got time to polish the lamp, you've got time to clean the coffeepot 1.3404 0.06154 94 68 20 6
556 I don't live in the lamp anymore. . . I'm on the grid. 1.3404 0.06337 94 69 18 7
557 Your one wish is toast? 1.3404 0.06857 94 72 12 10
558 Living in the toaster cuts down on getting rubbed the wrong way. 1.3404 0.05770 94 66 24 4
559 If you'd swiped left you'd have got Mary Poppins.... 1.3404 0.06515 94 70 16 8
560 Can this wait? I airbnb'd the toaster until Friday. 1.3404 0.06154 94 68 20 6
561 You have three dishes. 1.3404 0.05965 94 67 22 5
562 The last guy thought it would be funny to use his final wish on a practical joke. 1.3404 0.06154 94 68 20 6
563 Not even a genie can get the crumbs out. 1.3404 0.05568 94 65 26 3
564 Hey, just be glad I'm not the Diaper Genie. 1.3333 0.05987 93 67 21 5
565 That's my summer house. I winter in the toaster. 1.3333 0.05583 93 65 25 3
566 When you said you were moving me into a duplex, that's not what I had in mind. 1.3333 0.05987 93 67 21 5
567 You're sure you want your third and final wish to be a juicer? 1.3333 0.06179 93 68 19 6
568 Okay, that's the coffeemaker and the toaster fixed. You only have one left. 1.3333 0.05583 93 65 25 3
569 I'm the Breakfast Genie. PopTarts or Eggo's? 1.3333 0.06179 93 68 19 6
570 Don't rub the coffee pot. 1.3333 0.05987 93 67 21 5
571 I think the last guy's third wish was supposed to be about living on the West Coast, but then he sneezed. 1.3333 0.06365 93 69 17 7
572 Is that lamp air conditioned? 1.3333 0.06179 93 68 19 6
573 You get three wishes then I'm toast. 1.3333 0.05987 93 67 21 5
574 Thanks buddy. I've been stuck in that freaking toaster for 1400 years. 1.3333 0.05987 93 67 21 5
575 But this one has central heat and two breadrooms! 1.3333 0.06179 93 68 19 6
576 Then the Sultan bans our Union and next thing, we're toast. 1.3297 0.06454 91 68 16 7
577 You know, most people wish for money, not a Pop-tart setting on their toaster. 1.3297 0.06063 91 66 20 5
578 Sorry, I always do this, I went in and just completely forgot your wish. Was it toast and coffee? 1.3297 0.06261 91 67 18 6
579 The new place has electricity. 1.3297 0.06261 91 67 18 6
580 Surprised? I'm just the new pop-up version. 1.3297 0.06454 91 68 16 7
581 But it's warmer in here. 1.3297 0.06454 91 68 16 7
582 You fix my lamp yet? This rental is terrible. 1.3297 0.05646 91 64 24 3
583 I'll grant your wish if you unplug the toaster. 1.3297 0.06261 91 67 18 6
584 One day, when you're 5,000 years old, you'll want to move to a warmer climate, too. 1.3297 0.06261 91 67 18 6
585 No more burnt toast it is. 1.3297 0.06261 91 67 18 6
586 Fresh air, heat, rent control and its next to a Starbucks, I would have been stupid not to move to the toaster. 1.3297 0.06640 91 69 14 8
587 Slide the knob to the left if you want me with light brown hair. 1.3297 0.06063 91 66 20 5
588 Pop tarts? You're joking, right? 1.3297 0.05859 91 65 22 4
589 Can you set it for bagels? It's a little cramped in there. 1.3297 0.06063 91 66 20 5
590 I'm shvitzing in there 1.3297 0.05859 91 65 22 4
591 And for your final wish, which small appliance would you like? 1.3297 0.06063 91 66 20 5
592 It's all digital and streaming now. If you need me, I'm in the smart toaster. Alexa knows how to get in touch. 1.3297 0.06454 91 68 16 7
593 Retirement party and I got toasted last night... 1.3297 0.06063 91 66 20 5
594 I will grant you any wish, as long as it's light, medium or dark. 1.3297 0.06063 91 66 20 5
595 Look, now you just have to say: "Alexa, I want to make a wish." I'll pop right up. 1.3297 0.05646 91 64 24 3
596 What? You think perfect toast happens by accident? 1.3297 0.05426 91 63 26 2
597 Airbnb. 1.3297 0.05646 91 64 24 3
598 All I got is toast. You want magic carpets ask Mr. Coffee over there. 1.3297 0.06454 91 68 16 7
599 C'mon kid, it's 2017 we don't live in lamps anymore. 1.3297 0.05859 91 65 22 4
600 I've relocated to that steel box there-- it has a sauna! 1.3297 0.05859 91 65 22 4
601 Perhaps you expected Robin Williams? 1.3297 0.06454 91 68 16 7
602 The dual skylights are nice, but the inability to control the temperature is kind of a deal breaker. 1.3297 0.05426 91 63 26 2
603 I'm not your genie, I'm just a toastmaster. 1.3258 0.05931 89 64 21 4
604 ....yeah my sister was a pop tart! 1.3258 0.06143 89 65 19 5
605 You rubbed? 1.3258 0.05931 89 64 21 4
606 See what happens when you rub me the wrong way? Your wish is TOAST! 1.3258 0.06737 89 68 13 8
607 No,genie in the lamp is 3 wishes ,toaster 2 wishes and coffeemaker 1. 1.3258 0.05712 89 63 23 3
608 Happy now? Three wishes, three searches, and your hamster is still nowhere to be found. 1.3258 0.06545 89 67 15 7
609 Thanks for letting me out of there! I thought I was toast! 1.3258 0.06143 89 65 19 5
610 The greatest thing since sliced bread. 1.3258 0.06143 89 65 19 5
611 I can grant you as many wishes as you want, but they all must be toast-related. 1.3258 0.06143 89 65 19 5
612 Its my place for the winter. 1.3258 0.06347 89 66 17 6
613 No, I'm the Toaster Genie. You can make a wish every time you press the lever, but it will only last for 90 seconds. 1.3247 0.06778 77 57 15 5
614 I tried, okay? You should have wished for an extended warranty. 1.3239 0.05942 71 49 21 1
615 Yeah, it's my pop up gig. 1.3218 0.06224 87 64 18 5
616 Thanks! Some over-buttered bagel's been keeping me here under lox and key. 1.3218 0.05779 87 62 22 3
617 Make a wish: Light, medium or dark. 1.3218 0.06006 87 63 20 4
618 I needed more space, but the dishwasher was already full. 1.3218 0.06436 87 65 16 6
619 Finally! It's hotter than the Sahara in this blasted appliance. 1.3218 0.05779 87 62 22 3
620 You can rub it all you want, there are no more Pop Tarts. 1.3218 0.06006 87 63 20 4
621 OK, toaster's fixed. How about a castle of gold and a Ferrari? 1.3218 0.06436 87 65 16 6
622 What? You expected a bagel? 1.3218 0.06224 87 64 18 5
623 What made you think to rub the toaster? 1.3218 0.06436 87 65 16 6
624 Open, Sesame Toast is just not funny. 1.3218 0.06224 87 64 18 5
625 I left the lamp eons ago. It's cozy in the toaster, the coffee maker is right next door and I take my showers in the dishwasher. 1.3218 0.06224 87 64 18 5
626 It's a SmartLamp. It links to other appliances. 1.3218 0.06436 87 65 16 6
627 Lamps are old school. We're running smart devices nowadays. 1.3218 0.06224 87 64 18 5
628 This started right after I joined ToastMasters. 1.3218 0.06224 87 64 18 5
629 I don't know where he went. But rub the coffee maker and ask Steve. 1.3218 0.05779 87 62 22 3
630 The three wishes, I'm afraid, pertain only to the doneness of the toast and the type of bread, waffle, or pop tart being heated. The coffee selections are well beyond my pervue. 1.3218 0.05779 87 62 22 3
631 I lost the lease. 1.3218 0.06224 87 64 18 5
632 I'm not crazy about the location, but I needed more space. 1.3218 0.05543 87 61 24 2
633 My name is Gene, not Jeannie, and you can make your own damn coffee 1.3176 0.05348 85 59 25 1
634 It's from Williams Sonoma. You've got two more wishes. 1.3176 0.06083 85 62 19 4
635 Grande, decaf, nonfat,extra foam--no can do; that's four wishes 1.3176 0.06309 85 63 17 5
636 Beats me. Try the oracle in the coffee maker. 1.3176 0.05604 85 60 23 2
637 Thanks. It was hot as hell in there. 1.3176 0.06083 85 62 19 4
638 Fixed it! Now what's your seccond wish? 1.3176 0.05849 85 61 21 3
639 He's on vacation. Rub four times for voicemail. 1.3176 0.06528 85 64 15 6
640 Sorry, I'm just the bagel guy. You'll have to summon Magic Chef if you want biscuits. 1.3176 0.06309 85 63 17 5
641 I was in the tanning booth. 1.3176 0.05849 85 61 21 3
642 Could you please rub the coffee-maker? My wife's been in there since Joe DiMaggio was alive. 1.3176 0.05604 85 60 23 2
643 Make another wish - that bagel's not moving. 1.3176 0.06739 85 65 13 7
644 Can you blame me? Free heat and and more sqaure footage! 1.3176 0.06309 85 63 17 5
645 Yeah, I haven't lived in an oil lamp since the invention of the lightbulb. 1.3176 0.06309 85 63 17 5
646 I transgendered from mermaid to genie-you got a problem with that? 1.3140 0.05792 86 62 21 3
647 Well, I had to choose between being in hot water all the time or just popping up when called. 1.3140 0.06872 86 67 11 8
648 I get to work on my tan just once a year, so this better be good. 1.3140 0.05792 86 62 21 3
649 You have three choices - white, rye or multigrain. 1.3140 0.06247 86 64 17 5
650 You're using an outdated way to contact me. You should go to my Facebook page. 1.3140 0.06462 86 65 15 6
651 What is your wish? Light, medium or dark? 1.3140 0.05792 86 62 21 3
652 I'll grant you three wishes ... white, wheat or rye? 1.3140 0.06872 86 67 11 8
653 We haven't come out of lanterns in centuries. Amazing how hard it is to dispel false rumors. 1.3140 0.05551 86 61 23 2
654 Actually nothing is EVER better than sliced bread. 1.3140 0.05299 86 60 25 1
655 Your toast is my command. 1.3140 0.06462 86 65 15 6
656 Perfect toast? What do you think I am? 1.3133 0.06841 83 64 12 7
657 Hello,I'm your pop-up genie. 1.3133 0.06623 83 63 14 6
658 My last master said if I didn't give her extra wishes that I was toast. 1.3133 0.06841 83 64 12 7
659 OK, I'll try my magic -- but fixing Obamacare will use up all three wishes, and the replacement will probably look a lot like, well, Obamacare. 1.3133 0.06623 83 63 14 6
660 I've been known to pop-up where you least expect it. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
661 Instead of granting you a wish, I shall offer you a toast. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
662 It's got central heating. 1.3133 0.05920 83 60 20 3
663 What? The lamp gets cold. In here, it's toasty. 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
664 Wish for more wishes, kid, and you're toast. 1.3133 0.05667 83 59 22 2
665 Ditch the lantern, brew me some Arabica, and wish granted. 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
666 Open sesame, with cream cheese? 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
667 I've started seeing other appliances. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
668 You caught me making breakfast. 1.3133 0.06623 83 63 14 6
669 Not to complain, but the new place is a little toasty. 1.3133 0.06841 83 64 12 7
670 well then, next time don't leave me in the freezer. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
671 I can get internet in the toaster 1.3133 0.06623 83 63 14 6
672 Guy before you had no sense of humor. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
673 I'm tired of living off the grid. 1.3133 0.06841 83 64 12 7
674 I've moved up to a double wide. 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
675 Sorry, it's my first day on the job. Try to rub it again... 1.3133 0.05920 83 60 20 3
676 Another wish? You'll have to butter me up first. 1.3133 0.06841 83 64 12 7
677 Someone set it on GENIE. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
678 He's been downsized. I'm Tony of the Toaster, your new Wish Relationship Coordinator. 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
679 I fixed your toaster. Two wishes left. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
680 Put it over there by the land-line wall phone. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
681 You get three wishes: toast, bagel or English muffin. 1.3133 0.06623 83 63 14 6
682 Toast, another toast, plus coffee makes three wishes. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
683 Wishes. I said 'wishes.' I don't do dishes. 1.3133 0.05122 83 57 26 0
684 I'm working remote today. 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
685 Quick, rub the lamp or I'm toast! 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
686 I've relocated to a warmer climate 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
687 Sure it gets hot, but I grew up in the fertile crescent. I'm used to the heat. 1.3133 0.05920 83 60 20 3
688 Gravy boat genie needs to be refrigerated. 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
689 Quid pro quo kid; you get that new bike and I finally get a place with central heating--deal? 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
690 You should see the other guy. 1.3133 0.06841 83 64 12 7
691 I prefer the modern conveniences. 1.3133 0.06623 83 63 14 6
692 Well, it's a bit more roomy and way more comfortable in the winter. 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
693 Just trying to compete with Alexa 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
694 This is my winter vacation home. 1.3133 0.06397 83 62 16 5
695 Ok, so the cinnamon raisin bagel, then world peace, then the strawberry Pop Tart. 1.3133 0.06623 83 63 14 6
696 Rubbing is sooo 18th century. #hotspot.connected.tweetawish 1.3133 0.06623 83 63 14 6
697 Yes, you get three wishes, but they all have to be bread-related. 1.3133 0.07053 83 65 10 8
698 Only two slots, only two wishes. 1.3133 0.06623 83 63 14 6
699 It's bigger, warmer, and came with free wifi. 1.3133 0.05920 83 60 20 3
700 I grant you three slices. Use them wisely. 1.3133 0.06164 83 61 18 4
701 Your mom said it was cool if I crash here 1.3133 0.05667 83 59 22 2
702 One more wish and I'm toast. 1.3133 0.06623 83 63 14 6
703 Voila, the toaster's fixed with two wishes left. 1.3133 0.07053 83 65 10 8
704 It's twice the space and heat is included. 1.3095 0.06770 84 65 12 7
705 I gave you the bagel, you wished for, but how long you want it toasted, is considered wish number two! 1.3095 0.06332 84 63 16 5
706 I grant you three dishes. 1.3095 0.06770 84 65 12 7
707 I'm renting out my lamp on Airbnb 1.3095 0.06770 84 65 12 7
708 I don't grant wishes, I give toasts. 1.3095 0.05350 84 59 24 1
709 Raisin toast? All you want is raisin toast? 1.3095 0.06332 84 63 16 5
710 I always wanted to retire somewhere warm. 1.3095 0.06101 84 62 18 4
711 I grant you three levels of doneness 1.3091 0.07281 55 40 13 2
712 Good zip code. Crummy place. 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
713 the real magic's in the coffee pot. 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
714 Yes it's crumby, but at least it's toasty. 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
715 Anything you desire except there is a disclaimer for bipartisan political cooperation. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
716 I'll grant you one of three wishes: light, medium, or dark? 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
717 I'm telling you, you can still have toast, just wish for the toast and I'll get you your freakin' toast! 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
718 Might I suggest your third wish be something other than a small appliance? 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
719 What? Do you have any idea what it costs to rent a lamp in the city? 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
720 Toaster? Lamp? who cares? You want three wishes, or not? 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
721 Let me tell you the story of 1001 mornings. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
722 You really just want the crumbs gone? 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
723 Every genie wants to live in a lamp. The rent is just out of control. 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
724 If you would, free my girlfriend from the coffee maker and we'll be on our way. 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
725 First, genius, you have to plug in the toaster! 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
726 No Starbucks, kid. Unlimited Pop Tarts. Kapeesh? 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
727 I wish the tanning bed wasn't on the same breaker as the hot tub. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
728 I got really toasted last night and couldn't find my way back to my lamp. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
729 Okay toaster is clean. What is your second wish Felix? 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
730 Hot, but roomy! 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
731 Okay, you found me. Now you go hide. 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
732 I upgraded to a place with heating. It's real toasty in there. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
733 Yeah, those wishes you wanted? They're toast. 1.3086 0.06948 81 63 11 7
734 L'eggo my lampo. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
735 You make the coffee, I'll grant the wishes. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
736 You wished for a hotter Jeannie. This is what you get. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
737 It's crumb free. That's one. 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
738 It's my winter home. 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
739 I thought you wanted to get 'toasted.' 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
740 Actually, Master, I was hoping to upgrade to something a little roomier, like the coffee carafe. 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
741 It's ok but I miss the period features of the old place. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
742 Did you try re-setting the router? 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
743 Sorry, but I found a two bedroom with heat included. 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
744 I'm retired. I can offer you three pop tarts if you like? 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
745 The toaster has central heating. 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
746 You can wish for light, medium or dark. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
747 Yes I'm taking a breather, Timmy. Your old man's second wish was..... let's just say hard to watch. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
748 No, only two wishes. It's a two-slot toaster. 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
749 Keep it! My new place has central heating. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
750 I know it's not my place to judge, but that was a dumb wish. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
751 Did you wish for whole wheat or rye? 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
752 Sorry, kid. I'm toast. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
753 For your third wish; regular, or decaf? 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
754 Three wishes? There's only two slots. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
755 I'm a metaphor - your wish will be toast. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
756 The heat's included. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
757 You have three wishes: rye, whole wheat, or sourdough? 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
758 I haven't used one of those in centuries. 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
759 Magic lamps aren't dishwasher safe. 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
760 The genies union prohibits oil lamps. Akbar's in your vacuum cleaner now. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
761 What did you expect? The lights were off! And, well... I was drunk. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
762 ...but WAIT, if you act NOW you can get the Coffee Genie FREE! 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
763 Have you seen oil prices these days? 1.3086 0.06948 81 63 11 7
764 I don't mind, it's often warm and no one rubs it. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
765 Jeannie will be out in a minute, she's getting some coffee. 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
766 Why can't you ask Alexa like everyone else? 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
767 Rub it again and you're toast. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
768 With the new travel ban, I'm toast. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
769 Did someone say "open sesame bagel"? 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
770 It was 2 bedrooms with skylights. So I jumped on it. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
771 I don't do homework, but I'm really good at toast. 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
772 And I'm telling you, your only two choices are toasted rye or toasted cinnamon bagel. 1.3086 0.07167 81 64 9 8
773 Sorry kid, that piece of bagel isn't coming out. 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
774 I need an upgrade. 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
775 I switched from oil to electric. 1.3086 0.06948 81 63 11 7
776 Kid, I'm making an executive decision that your first wish is toast and coffee. After sleeping 1,000 years in that lamp, I need it. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
777 Sorry, if you want both the "defrost" and "bagel" settings to work, it counts as two wishes. 1.3086 0.05731 81 58 21 2
778 I can't do immortality, but I can do a Pop-Tart. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
779 Do you really want to be the toast of the town? 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
780 I grant you three wishes, but they must include white, whet or rye.... 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
781 I know you wished for domination over everything, but would you settle for domination over an everything bagel? 1.3086 0.06246 81 60 17 4
782 Sorry about the bagel but your mother killed the first two with "I just wish I could sit down for once with a decent cup of coffee." 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
783 Please don't wish to be somewhere hot and toasty. 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
784 Seriously??...the lamp is so yesterday... 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
785 Sorry, I was just using my tanning bed 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
786 Listen Al, let's really think before we make this last wish. 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
787 You know how cold it is in that lamp? 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
788 Did you want to make a wish or a toast? 1.3086 0.06489 81 61 15 5
789 I thought you said a chrome toaster, not a roller coaster. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
790 Your Mother got the house. I got the appliances. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
791 You cannot expect espresso and artisanal focaccia by rubbing a 1973 magic lamp. The best I can do is a strawberry pop tart and a cup of Joe. 1.3086 0.05994 81 59 19 3
792 No he's not going to come out. He knows what else you've been rubbing. 1.3086 0.06722 81 62 13 6
793 You don't mind, do you? It's a lot warmer in here. 1.3038 0.05797 79 57 20 2
794 It's really the central heating that sold me on it. 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
795 Just getting a tan. 1.3038 0.06332 79 59 16 4
796 It's a new venue, the lamp was getting old. 1.3038 0.05797 79 57 20 2
797 Sorry, but you can only wish for rye or cinnamon raisin. 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
798 Allow me to explain gentrification. 1.3038 0.06584 79 60 14 5
799 I'm kinda busy right now. Try the coffeemaker. 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
800 Your first wish should be for a panini press and an espresso maker. 1.3038 0.06332 79 59 16 4
801 I want to move back into the lamp. This toaster’s a crumby place to live. 1.3038 0.05510 79 56 22 1
802 These days, you can summon me from any appliance. 1.3038 0.06332 79 59 16 4
803 Lamps? We haven't used those things in years! I actually heard we're moving to the iPhone X next month. 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
804 Sorry kid - all I got is toast. 1.3038 0.05510 79 56 22 1
805 A slot for bagels? You wish! 1.3038 0.06584 79 60 14 5
806 Son, this is a real step up from being the Diaper Genie! 1.3038 0.07059 79 62 10 7
807 Your three wishes are limited to light, medium or dark toast. 1.3038 0.06584 79 60 14 5
808 You want wishes or you want toaster strudel? Make up your mind. 1.3038 0.06332 79 59 16 4
809 Who did you expect, Barbara Eden? 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
810 Really? This is what you wish for? 1.3038 0.06826 79 61 12 6
811 You might want to think about your next two. 1.3038 0.06584 79 60 14 5
812 Forget the pot, kid, we've gone electric. 1.3038 0.05797 79 57 20 2
813 It was time I upgraded to central heating. 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
814 I've been outsourced to the Internet of Things. 1.3038 0.06332 79 59 16 4
815 I've been subletting. 1.3038 0.06826 79 61 12 6
816 I got a great deal on a sublet 1.3038 0.06584 79 60 14 5
817 This was the only hot spot I could find! 1.3038 0.06584 79 60 14 5
818 Let me get my stuff out of the rice cooker 1.3038 0.06826 79 61 12 6
819 Most money? I thought you said "toast, honey." 1.3038 0.07286 79 63 8 8
820 White, Wheat, Rye, or Pumpernickel, your wish is my command. 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
821 Yeah, I wish you had bought the warranty too. 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
822 It's roomier and toastier. 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
823 That's a very old model. We're all electric now. 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
824 I'll give you four wishes if you'll make me some coffee. 1.3038 0.05797 79 57 20 2
825 What's wrong? You look confused. 1.3038 0.06826 79 61 12 6
826 It's 2017. I'm the Genie of Things. 1.3038 0.06332 79 59 16 4
827 Yeah, well, we'd *all* like better coffee. 1.3038 0.06332 79 59 16 4
828 What's the point if all you make is decaf? 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
829 I told you not to rub me the wrong way. 1.3038 0.06332 79 59 16 4
830 Yeah, and you're not Tom Hanks either. 1.3038 0.06584 79 60 14 5
831 It's more American. 1.3038 0.06584 79 60 14 5
832 You get three wishes: Light, Medium , and Dark 1.3038 0.06826 79 61 12 6
833 What's a vente skinny vanilla latte? Try another wish. 1.3038 0.06071 79 58 18 3
834 It's a warmer climate, plus there's this hot little Pop Tart.... 1.3038 0.05797 79 57 20 2
835 You only get two wishes. The bagel counts as one. 1.3038 0.06584 79 60 14 5
836 You got a fork? 1.2987 0.05865 77 56 19 2
837 Thanks, for not wishing for toast. 1.2987 0.06933 77 60 11 6
838 Challah if you need me... 1.2987 0.06682 77 59 13 5
839 You said that if I didn't make you grow 10 inches overnight, I'd be toast. 1.2987 0.06682 77 59 13 5
840 OK. You get three dishes. 1.2987 0.06421 77 58 15 4
841 From now on if you want to get in touch with me, use the toaster. And put that smelly thing in the dish washer. 1.2987 0.05250 77 54 23 0
842 "I'm in here until I get wifi for my lamp". 1.2987 0.06682 77 59 13 5
843 Oh good, if I stay in there any longer I'm toast. 1.2987 0.05865 77 56 19 2
844 Son, did you just waste number two on edges browned, thin, and crispy? 1.2987 0.06421 77 58 15 4
845 Sorry, kid. Due to cutbacks, your choices today are light, medium, and dark. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
846 Thanks kid. I've been stuck in there since the office went paleo. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
847 The toaster should work now, but I honestly don’t think there’s much I can do about the office coffee. 1.2987 0.06421 77 58 15 4
848 Mr. Coffee was my home until your folks switched to espresso. 1.2987 0.05865 77 56 19 2
849 'Aha, a lad in possession of my lamp.' 1.2987 0.06933 77 60 11 6
850 that's nothing, now rub the coffee pot. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
851 OK, the crumbs are gone. What's next? 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
852 Look, kid, you can wish for anything you want. But doesn't your mother already make breakfast for you every single morning? 1.2987 0.07175 77 61 9 7
853 Pull the plug before you rub it! 1.2987 0.06682 77 59 13 5
854 Apparently you haven't installed the latest upgrades. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
855 You get three wishes: white, pita or rye? 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
856 And then they introduced Prime with 2-day shipping. They took our jobs!!! 1.2987 0.06682 77 59 13 5
857 You have one of three wishes- Light, medium or dark. 1.2987 0.06933 77 60 11 6
858 Better not rub me the wrong way! 1.2987 0.06933 77 60 11 6
859 I fixed the toaster. You have two left. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
860 Sure it's a duplex but it's an upgrade from that old mobile home. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
861 Wanna trade? 1.2987 0.05566 77 55 21 1
862 Master please, my ass is toast in there, I'll grant you another wish! 1.2987 0.05865 77 56 19 2
863 This is why we beta test 1.2987 0.06421 77 58 15 4
864 So let me get this straight. Rather than an iPhone X, your wish is for me to make a perfect pot of coffee and golden brown toast every day? 1.2987 0.05566 77 55 21 1
865 Just stick a knife in it and you should be able to pry the wishes out of it. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
866 Sure you want to waste all your wishes on small appliance repairs? 1.2987 0.06682 77 59 13 5
867 So grateful! Before you summoned, I thought I was toast! 1.2987 0.06421 77 58 15 4
868 My last master said "You're toast", and I've been there ever since. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
869 Alas, only a four-pronged fork will release me from this appliance to grant your three wishes. 1.2987 0.05865 77 56 19 2
870 No, I'm Mr. Toaster. 1.2987 0.06933 77 60 11 6
871 I just wanted a place with electricity. 1.2987 0.06421 77 58 15 4
872 Rubbing is just so 11th century. Now it's plug 'n play. 1.2987 0.05566 77 55 21 1
873 ... but it's nice and toasty in there 1.2987 0.06933 77 60 11 6
874 Sorry but the best I can do is grant you three dishes. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
875 I’m Transvessel. 1.2987 0.06682 77 59 13 5
876 You never know where I'm going to pop up. 1.2987 0.06933 77 60 11 6
877 It's my winter home. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
878 It's warmer, and I have more space. 1.2987 0.05566 77 55 21 1
879 The lamp is so cliche. 1.2987 0.06149 77 57 17 3
880 Sorry kid. Barbara Eden has retired. 1.2987 0.06933 77 60 11 6
881 It's a stunning example of toast-modernism. 1.2987 0.06933 77 60 11 6
882 Rub me the wrong way and our relationship is toast! 1.2963 0.06197 81 61 16 4
883 Your mom found the lamp this morning and made me a counter offer. 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
884 Can I suggest that you simply request an apartment complete with all kitchen appliances? 1.2933 0.06231 75 56 16 3
885 Give me the password for the coffee pot and I'll give you the password for the toaster. 1.2933 0.06231 75 56 16 3
886 If you seek the genie of the lamp, go and clap once in the living room. 1.2933 0.06231 75 56 16 3
887 I'm a genie in a toaster, baby. 1.2933 0.06231 75 56 16 3
888 I think you rubbed the wrong number 1.2933 0.06785 75 58 12 5
889 Next time, unplug it, or your second wish will be toast. 1.2933 0.06231 75 56 16 3
890 Thanks....it was getting toasty in there. 1.2933 0.06785 75 58 12 5
891 Tea and toast. What more do you want? 1.2933 0.06514 75 57 14 4
892 The property taxes in that lamp were just getting out of hand. 1.2933 0.06231 75 56 16 3
893 White or rye? 1.2933 0.07045 75 59 10 6
894 You had ONE job... 1.2933 0.06514 75 57 14 4
895 He's in the chandelier visiting his folks. 1.2933 0.06785 75 58 12 5
896 Ask me back into that bottle again and you're toast. 1.2933 0.05935 75 55 18 2
897 See what happens when you rub me the wrong way. 1.2933 0.06514 75 57 14 4
898 Your three wishes are toast. 1.2933 0.06785 75 58 12 5
899 It has something to do with the difference between American and European voltages. 1.2933 0.06785 75 58 12 5
900 The lamp is my summer home 1.2933 0.05935 75 55 18 2
901 Mind if I make some coffee before we get started, it's be a long 10,000 years. 1.2933 0.06514 75 57 14 4
902 Two beds, central heating... 1.2933 0.06231 75 56 16 3
903 Dude! You are a lifesaver. I couldn't remember where I left it!!! 1.2933 0.06785 75 58 12 5
904 You're a champ for finding the lamp, kid...another minute in there, I was toast! 1.2933 0.07045 75 59 10 6
905 I can't decide: cozy and quaint or open and modern? 1.2933 0.07296 75 60 8 7
906 But this one has free heat and electricity. 1.2933 0.06514 75 57 14 4
907 That's a big one for first thing in the morning, kid. Would you mind if I had a cup of coffee or two before getting Melania and Ivanka to spend the night with you in your treehouse? 1.2933 0.07045 75 59 10 6
908 How may I serve you, Toastmaster? 1.2933 0.05935 75 55 18 2
909 Your last wish is for avocado on glutan-free toast? 1.2933 0.06785 75 58 12 5
910 I wish for Universal single-payer healthcare for all. Sorry kid I only do toast! 1.2933 0.06785 75 58 12 5
911 However, your three wishes cannot be white, wheat or rye. 1.2933 0.06785 75 58 12 5
912 "You summon me, after eons of anguished captivity, for two pieces of well-done toast? Really? 1.2933 0.05935 75 55 18 2
913 I can't help. Check the coffee pot genie 1.2933 0.06231 75 56 16 3
914 The toaster is fixed. You have two more appliance wishes. 1.2933 0.06785 75 58 12 5
915 No, that's my cousin. I'm the Genie of Things. 1.2909 0.07188 55 41 12 2
916 Well, obviously that didn't work. I suggest you try again on November 3, 2020. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
917 Rye, wheat, or pumpernickel? 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
918 OK, I've activated all items to obey your voice, but reconsider them acting randomly for your parents'. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
919 A thousand and one nights was enough. I switched to mornings. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
920 It was a late night. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
921 Now I'm Genie with the light brown toasted derriere." 1.2877 0.06891 73 57 11 5
922 I'm Pop Toastie, subbing for the regular genie. He's recuperating from people who voted for Hillary. Always the same wish. 1.2877 0.06891 73 57 11 5
923 Look, kid, I've already explained this: no lamp business until I get a green card. 1.2877 0.06891 73 57 11 5
924 The next time ask Siri when you want Pokemon. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
925 When you try to toast bread with sesame seeds, what did you expect? 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
926 My lamp is being redecorated. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
927 You're really going to waste your one wish to scare your sister? 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
928 When you're older and want a place of your own, you'll understand. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
929 It's fixed. What's your next command? 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
930 Sorry, kid. The coffee maker genie grants three wishes. I only do card tricks. 1.2877 0.06891 73 57 11 5
931 Somehow a lantern makes more sense? 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
932 Used to be a little rub and I was good to go. Nowadays it takes some serious juice. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
933 That's SO first millennium. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
934 Don’t over-think it, we can start with toast... 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
935 I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn 1.2877 0.06891 73 57 11 5
936 The toaster is my gig. If you want Pop Tarts, rub the lamp. 1.2877 0.06006 73 54 17 2
937 I moved in because I couldn't get wi-fi in the lamp. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
938 You may now wish for one more small kitchen appliance. 1.2877 0.06006 73 54 17 2
939 Sorry, kid. I stopped granting wishes when I got into small appliances. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
940 One more wish and you'll blow a fuse. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
941 Alexa is taking over everything. I had to switch to the toaster. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
942 Yes, Master. What is your greatest desire----bagel, whole wheat, or rye? 1.2877 0.06006 73 54 17 2
943 Get me out of the toaster and you get four wishes. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
944 I'm Mr. Toast. If you wanted coffee, you needed to point to Mr. Coffee 1.2877 0.06006 73 54 17 2
945 It's my pop-up store. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
946 What, you gotta have your three wishes before I even have breakfast? 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
947 If you were the one that microwaved fish, no wishes. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
948 You can't expect me to go back to a studio. Not after this duplex! 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
949 You just burned your first wish. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
950 It's my winter address. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
951 The other guy already asked for a Keurig machine 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
952 I needed a place with an elevator. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
953 Sure, you can have three wishes. Do you want light, medium, or dark? 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
954 Oh good, I thought I was having a stroke. 1.2877 0.07162 73 58 9 6
955 I'm toast now! 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
956 I moved. Got tired of the little teapot song. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
957 Can't you come up with a cooler wish? 1.2877 0.06891 73 57 11 5
958 Are you sure "a bit more" is your third and final wish? 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
959 So if it's alright with you, I'd like to stay there for the winter 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
960 Dude - this is 2017. We don't live in lamps anymore. I actually have a condo in LA. 1.2877 0.06006 73 54 17 2
961 Technically, you did just wish the toaster would stop burning you bagels, so that makes three. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
962 I didn't think he meant "you're toast" quite so literally. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
963 whatever you do, don't rub the coffee maker. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
964 You wish for toast; I’ve got toast. You wish for tea; I’m the wrong guy. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
965 Sorry, I was in the sauna. 1.2877 0.06891 73 57 11 5
966 Listen kid, I know they're your wishes and all but are you sure you want to use one up on "breakfast"? 1.2877 0.06006 73 54 17 2
967 I was bred in Arabia and now I am the toast of New York. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
968 And for your second wish, white or brown? 1.2877 0.06891 73 57 11 5
969 You call him Mr. Coffee, you can call me MISTER Genie. 1.2877 0.06006 73 54 17 2
970 Look, I can fix your life but this toaster? Good luck. 1.2877 0.06609 73 56 13 4
971 And you get an extra wish if you clean out the toast crumbs. 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
972 So let me guess, Timmy. Your mother's first trip to Ali's Shop and Swap? 1.2877 0.06315 73 55 15 3
973 No wi-fi. 1.2817 0.06401 71 54 14 3
974 I'm the Pop Up Genie 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
975 This is crummy but at least it has heat. 1.2817 0.06401 71 54 14 3
976 Sorry, kid, today it's all about popups. 1.2817 0.05738 71 52 18 1
977 You should see what you have to do to the coffee genie to get him to come out... 1.2817 0.06401 71 54 14 3
978 Working on my tan. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
979 Get with it kid, no one uses a lamp anymore. 1.2817 0.06401 71 54 14 3
980 Your small appliance wish is my command. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
981 2 of the 3 wishes have gotta be toast. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
982 Well, my first wish is that you don't set off the smoke alarm. 1.2817 0.06401 71 54 14 3
983 I decided to move somewhere with central heating. 1.2817 0.06401 71 54 14 3
984 I get more spring out of this thing. 1.2817 0.06079 71 53 16 2
985 I fucked your toaster, that's what's up. 1.2817 0.07284 71 57 8 6
986 To reach me in the future contact the Internet of Things. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
987 After a perfectly toasted bagel, what's your second wish? 1.2817 0.07555 71 58 6 7
988 If you rub it you get me. If you want toast, slap it two times. 1.2817 0.06401 71 54 14 3
989 It's warmer than the lamp 1.2817 0.07002 71 56 10 5
990 Could you do me a favor and NOT rub the lamp? I hate that guy. 1.2817 0.07002 71 56 10 5
991 Hey kid, didn't anybody ever tell you it don't matter where you came from?" 1.2817 0.06079 71 53 16 2
992 I'm saving a fortune on my heating bills. 1.2817 0.06401 71 54 14 3
993 Princess Jasmine's not here. You'll never find her in the kitchen. 1.2817 0.06401 71 54 14 3
994 This is where I spend my winters. 1.2817 0.05738 71 52 18 1
995 You have three wishes: bagel, defrost, or reheat. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
996 You caught me at my vacation home 1.2778 0.05672 72 53 18 1
997 Stay awake in your 8 AM philosophy class? You need to summon Juan Valdez for that one. 1.2778 0.06915 72 57 10 5
998 I've moved to my winter quarters. 1.2778 0.05672 72 53 18 1
999 No, I'm a free range Genie 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1000 Welcome to the internet of things. 1.2778 0.06915 72 57 10 5
1001 Well, you're the one who expects me to just pop up whenever you need me... 1.2778 0.06007 72 54 16 2
1002 Sorry, I just do toast and bagels. The cappuccino genie is the next door down. 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1003 I moved. The rent is cheaper and it comes with free heat... 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1004 Even I can't make it cook evenly. 1.2778 0.06007 72 54 16 2
1005 I cover for the lamp genie on weekends. 1.2778 0.06626 72 56 12 4
1006 It's your science fair project; figure it out. 1.2778 0.07192 72 58 8 6
1007 'What do you mean, "where's the woman?" Listen kid, I'm the Genii of Kitchen-Appliances... When you said, "I want her, hot, black and in the palm of my hand.", I assumed you meant Mrs. Coffee, over here' 1.2778 0.06915 72 57 10 5
1008 My union says I can't work both appliances. 1.2778 0.06007 72 54 16 2
1009 Butter on both sides? 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1010 Kid, I'm not sure you get how this wish thing works. 1.2778 0.06007 72 54 16 2
1011 Did I rub you the wrong way? 1.2778 0.06915 72 57 10 5
1012 Djinn-trification. 1.2778 0.06915 72 57 10 5
1013 First coffee, then toast! Where does this end? 1.2778 0.06626 72 56 12 4
1014 Yes, the lamp went out of fashion with the last oil embargo. 1.2778 0.06626 72 56 12 4
1015 Sorry. The toaster was your third wish. 1.2778 0.06626 72 56 12 4
1016 Okay, crumb tray’s clean. What’s your second wish? 1.2778 0.06007 72 54 16 2
1017 Why lie on a beach when I can get a great tan AND smell like cinnamon toast after just a couple of minutes inside that thing? 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1018 Avocado toast...as you wish. 1.2778 0.06915 72 57 10 5
1019 I grant you three dishes. 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1020 thanks. I was stuck in there for years. Gluten free household! 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1021 What did you expect - Sara Lee? 1.2778 0.06915 72 57 10 5
1022 By now you must certainly have heard of genetic engineering. 1.2778 0.06915 72 57 10 5
1023 You should see the magic carpet! 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1024 I like that its roomier, has a high ceiling and skylights, but man, it is messy! 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1025 This is your third wish. Do you want it light or dark? 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1026 Siri and I have decided to hang out together in the toaster. 1.2778 0.06626 72 56 12 4
1027 You rubbed me the wrong way. That's why! 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1028 It's all good. I'm Air BnB'ing. 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1029 It's been 1000 years since I've had breakfast. 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1030 Fire codes require at least two exits. That thing is a fire trap. 1.2778 0.06007 72 54 16 2
1031 Master, do you wish your slice of bread lightly toasted, medium or a burnt offering to the god of your choice? 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1032 And when the toast is ready, do you wish for butter? 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1033 White, rye or marble? 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1034 It's got heat, a second bedroom, and plenty of free bagel crumbs. You should check it out. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1035 Wheat or white? 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1036 OK. That's three. 1. get the crumbs out 2. lock it on Medium Dark and 3. have it tell the following classic joke every time you put in your bagel, "What does the devil say when he welcomes you to Hell? --'Would you like those buns toasted?'" 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1037 Joe received a fourth wish, overcoming 4,500 years of precedent because the bagel really was stuck in there. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1038 Why do you insist on rubbing me the wrong way? 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1039 Let me get some coffee and we'll try this again. 1.2754 0.07411 69 56 7 6
1040 I usually summer somewhere warm. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1041 "Your third and final wish is 'a perfect slice of toast'? Are you sure?! 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1042 And for your final wish, might I suggest a blender? 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1043 Are you sure you want to be the toast of the town? 1.2754 0.07411 69 56 7 6
1044 Sorry kid, some other genie is already working on the "Make America Great Again" wish. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1045 It's like AirBNB for genies. 1.2754 0.05797 69 51 17 1
1046 Sorry, no more wishes. After I fix this your mom wants work done on your dad. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1047 I don't love the central heating, but I really needed a bigger place. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1048 Look, if I don't get back into that lamp pronto, I'm toast. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1049 Sorry, quantum interference--it's the two-slit issue again. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1050 Sorry kid. GPS is great but not perfect. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1051 What, you think I come by this great tan naturally? 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1052 Well Timmy, while you were showing off the lamp at school I had to drink my way out of the coffee pot. Now I'm in here drying off. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1053 If I hadn't gotten out of there, I'd be toast. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1054 Most people would have asked for more wishes. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1055 How about you grant me a wish and get some heat in your damn apartment. 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1056 Look, you got your three wishes: the toaster, the coffeemaker and the dishwasher. No more. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1057 At my age, I need the pop-up lift of a toaster. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1058 "Damn it! I'm a Genie, not an electrician. 1.2754 0.05797 69 51 17 1
1059 Why didn't you just wish for a chef? 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1060 I'm just saying, trying to be a little more careful with wishes two and three. Okay? 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1061 So this is what they meant by "Wonder Bread." 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1062 Even genies need winter homes. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1063 Don't waste your wish. You can't make these things toast evenly on both sides. 1.2754 0.05417 69 50 19 0
1064 What? You've never wanted to move where it's warmer? 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1065 Sorry, defrosting the freezer would be considered a separate wish. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1066 I just started using Airbnb. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1067 "Got it...no more burnt toast. you still have TWO left. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1068 I was working on my tan! 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1069 I can grant you 3 wishes, or two slices of toast. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1070 It's just me and a few friends, though you may want to wish for a new toaster. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1071 Thanks, it was getting a little toasty in there. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1072 For awhile there I thought I was toast. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1073 Yes, I'm gluten free. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1074 Sorry kid, I don't grant wishes, but I'll be happy to make you some toast. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1075 You've got to unplug the coffee maker first." 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1076 Times have changed. It's two bedrooms and electric heat for crying out loud. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1077 Okay, from now on the toaster will burn everything that is not a poptart. 1.2754 0.05797 69 51 17 1
1078 I had to move. The toaster is rent controlled - the lamp is not. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1079 Why did I move? It wasn't the heat; it was the humidity 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1080 I don't grant wishes. I just make the toast pop up. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1081 It's so much warmer with central heating 1.2754 0.05797 69 51 17 1
1082 You burnt your last wish 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1083 I'm taking today off , I got toasted last night. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1084 No. You see, I'm 10,000 years old. I need help to pop up. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1085 I'd really like to help you, but the Tump administration is toasting Muslims. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1086 As you get older you'll learn to appreciate central heating. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1087 New sponsor, I'm now the official GE-nie. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1088 WHEN ELECTORAL COLLEDGE MAKES TRUMP PRESIDENT, TOASTER MAKES GENIE. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1089 Coffee and toast is two wishes. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1090 I'm an eGenie. 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1091 Sorry, your lamp lost its internet connection and I had to come through the toaster. 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1092 Nah, it's two wishes now. Light or dark. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1093 Be careful what you wish for or I'm toast. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1094 It's not as nice, but I saved a ton on heating last year. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1095 For centuries I give away treasures. And what do I get? Crumbs! So I ask you, why not the toaster, huh? 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1096 Rub the coffee pot, Sonny. The rest of my family needs to get out. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1097 I'm done with you. With these guys I get toast and coffee whenever I want. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1098 If you think about it, a great slice of toast is a lot like world peace or having infinite wealth. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1099 The TV remote’s not in here either. One wish left. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1100 The last guy asked for a ‘toasted sand-wish’. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1101 This is much more comfortable than that old lamp, Master - but don't rub it while it's hot! 1.2754 0.05797 69 51 17 1
1102 Your 3 wishes can only be....Toast, English Muffins or Bagels. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1103 Did you say GE or Genie? 1.2754 0.05797 69 51 17 1
1104 Your "smart" toaster has malware and even I can't fix it. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1105 No toast today, loser. You rubbed me the wrong way. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1106 Sorry kid, coffee is extra... 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1107 What are you a Luddite? We've moved on to modern appliances. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1108 I'd give it a minute if I were you 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1109 What, you've never gone back to the wrong apartment after a few too many? 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1110 Touch the lamp again and you're toast. 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1111 I was getting sick of the lamp, but I am getting great rates for it on Airbnb. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1112 You have three wishes: light, medium or burned to a crisp 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1113 Forget the lamp. At your age you better start realizing what you rub and what you don't. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1114 Please say you believe in genies or else I'm toast! 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1115 It won't set off your smoke alarm anymore, but I still think it's a waste of a wish. 1.2754 0.05797 69 51 17 1
1116 OK, they're clean as a whistle. And your second wish? 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1117 The lamplord raised the rent, so I move to this two-room place. Having a problem with the heat, though. 1.2754 0.05417 69 50 19 0
1118 You have three wishes - light, medium or dark. 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1119 In gratitude for my release, I offer you three toasts. 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1120 I can't believe you wasted a wish on Pop Tarts. 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1121 He's on his coffee break 1.2754 0.07411 69 56 7 6
1122 Look, I tried -- but even I can't get it to toast in less than a minute and half... 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1123 I stay in the toaster now. No one polishes it anymore. 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1124 Quick! Tell me your three wishes, or I'm toast! 1.2754 0.07411 69 56 7 6
1125 No, it's definitely three 'wiches. What do you want on your first? 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1126 Oh, lamps are so passe. After two-thousand years, I modernized. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1127 Sorry, but I ran out of wishes a long time ago. Best I can do is light, medium or dark. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1128 What!? It gets cold in that damned lamp. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1129 This is nothing. Rub it again and watch the coffeemaker. 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1130 Seriously, all you want are Pop-Tarts? 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1131 I used my points for an upgrade. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1132 And that's how you use the magic bagel setting.... 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1133 Wanna meet Mr. Coffee? 1.2754 0.05797 69 51 17 1
1134 Your choice. You can have: the toaster, the coffee maker, or what's inside the dishwasher. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1135 Now I smell like cinnamon toast. I hope you're happy. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1136 Times change....and it has power. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1137 That lamp is toast. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1138 Well ... it was cold in that thing ... this one has central heating! 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1139 Yes, you may have a cup of coffee. I don't care what your Mom says. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1140 Hey, the new place has heat and room for two. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1141 If you want me to appear out of the lamp you'll need a different adapter. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1142 A billion dollars? No, I distinctly heard "coffee and toast." 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1143 Well, forget about wish #1. That old English Muffin just ain't budging. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1144 This is not what I envisioned when they said I was being transferred somewhere warmer. 1.2754 0.05417 69 50 19 0
1145 Call it crummy, but at least this unit includes heat. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1146 I got whole wheat, multi-grain, rye, pumpernickel, or country white. Your wish is my command. 1.2754 0.05797 69 51 17 1
1147 I just moved. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1148 Sesame bagels.... 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1149 Still cheaper than Brooklyn 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1150 Ah, my young master, you should see what comes out of the microwave! 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1151 It's just for a week, it's a special promotion. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1152 For your last wish, may I suggest that you think outside the bread box? 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1153 It's too dangerous in the lamps. Three of my cousins got deported. 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1154 I repeat, "ANY three kinds of toast you choose!" 1.2754 0.07411 69 56 7 6
1155 It was just a loose wire, and yes, that was your last wish. 1.2727 0.05931 66 49 16 1
1156 Light, medium or dark? Choose carefully! 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1157 .... and yesterday I found my keys in the refrigerator. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1158 Ok,toaster fixed .Now for your next two wishes. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1159 Really? You want a pop tart! 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1160 Because I don't like coffee, okay. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1161 Now you know why the toast won't come out. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1162 While you're making wishes, get a new coffeemaker 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1163 Sorry! Bank foreclosed on the lamp and moved me to one of their toasters!! 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1164 Really? Are you sure you only want toast? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1165 It's only temporary until the magic lantern passes emissions. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1166 I can turn on your coffee machine, raise your thermostat, push down the toaster , and upgrade you to Prime, but I can't do all four." 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1167 So, you want it with cream cheese or not? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1168 The internet of things just got very weird. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1169 Smart" homes don't mesh well with old technology. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1170 Thanks for the upgrade! 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1171 I'll have to ask my boss to see if I can do World Peace. 1.2687 0.05456 67 49 18 0
1172 Everyone rubs a lamp, but no one will think to bother me here. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1173 You don't need to wish for dark toast. There's a setting for that. 1.2687 0.05456 67 49 18 0
1174 Alexa, make the coffee! 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1175 A third wish will void the warranty. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1176 Well, the lamp has not been updated in a 1,000 years, and the toaster is wired for cable. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1177 That is the best Tanning Salon I've ever been in. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1178 Rumor has it that Barbara Eden got stuck in the coffee pot. Try rubbing that one. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1179 ..and for your second wish I'd recommend the decaf. 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1180 I am sorry but your wish is toast. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1181 Ok seriously, for the last time... does that look like a tea kettle to you?? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1182 'Top brown only' function -- repaired! And your final wish? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1183 I was hungry. Is that a problem? 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1184 Ask me after I have coffee. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1185 Yeah, I know the toaster's cheaper, but the coffee pot has an open floor plan. 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1186 So I'm the appliance Genie... what's it to you? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1187 I'm sorry Barron, even a Genie can't change who your parents are........ 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1188 It's not the heat. It's the gluten. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1189 The genie in the lamp? Sorry, kid – I'm just the ghost in the machine. 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1190 All the old lamps were gentrified by white ghosts 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1191 It's going to be hot in summer, but it's a lot more comfortable than that rusty old teapot. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1192 You can now summon me hands free. 1.2687 0.05456 67 49 18 0
1193 Hi. I've been hiding in this toaster since your dad asked for a stock tip and I told him "Knucklebones are best." 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1194 As I said, your Genie will love it here, more square footage and central heating. 1.2687 0.05456 67 49 18 0
1195 This place is rent stabilized. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1196 Do you have anything with more than 2 rooms? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1197 I strongly suggest that you use your last wish on something other than fixing the kitchen appliances... 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1198 The Housing Authority said it was an upgrade. Better heating. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1199 Next time call Siri! 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1200 Clean the crumb tray and you get your wishes. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1201 For releasing me from my prison the reward is white, whole wheat, or rye. I can also offer regular or decaf. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1202 Master, I think you mother may have lied. By my inspection, this toaster would accept white bread. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1203 Fuck the New Yorker cartoon choosers. 1.2687 0.07544 67 55 6 6
1204 Things got confused when Aladdin opened the Best Buy. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1205 I thought you knew I was on vacation. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1206 I'm a snowbird. That's my winter home. 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1207 My agent said I needed to go electric to still be relevant in the on-demand economy. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1208 I can't turn a PopTart into a Cronut 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1209 No, I appear when you empty the crumb tray. 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1210 Make it quick. Aladdin’s on the other lamp. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1211 Quick, rub it again! My Cousin is in the coffee maker. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1212 Sorry, there's a bug in my Genie Positioning System. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1213 It's a Toastmaster. What do you expect? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1214 It's my man cave. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1215 I'm not moving back until you pour out the chamomile. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1216 I'm sort of like the hermit crab of genies. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1217 What'd expect, an eggo? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1218 I'm not going in there. There's no cell coverage. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1219 Not now, kid, I've got a date with a tempest in a teapot. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1220 I will grant you three wishes...provided they fall between the settings of light and dark. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1221 I wish you were more creative. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1222 Butter and jam on toast will use up all three. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1223 Some of the guys and I decided to switch to a more accessible appliance. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1224 A converted duplex, all electric. A lot of bread, but it's worth it. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1225 Yeah it's crumby but it's dual rooms with a view of the carafe. 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1226 I got an upgrade. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1227 I'm 2000 years old. You can't expect me to understand the Internet of Things. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1228 A keurig. A microwave. And what else would you loke, son? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1229 What made you think I'd know how to make breakfast? 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1230 Well, Trump was using the coffee pot as a camera. 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1231 I'd like to make a toast. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1232 You're really gonna waste one of your wishes on a cup of decaf? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1233 Your three wishes are toast. 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1234 Do you know how to work this thing? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1235 It's called the Internet of Things, kid. 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1236 Are you sure you want to use your first wish on Pop-Tarts? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1237 I popped in as quickly as I could. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1238 Things have changed. I need Wi-Fi now. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1239 What? You expect me to stay on the mantel when there's free coffee in here? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1240 I can grant you three kinds of toast: whole wheat, pumpernickel, and rye. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1241 I didn't see the rest of your bagel. Next wish? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1242 Infinite Pop Tarts as per your command! Next wish? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1243 The lamplord raised the rent. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1244 Central heating AND a spare room! 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1245 Dude, get over it. All I got is English muffin, sour dough or whole wheat. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1246 I've upgraded to a two-bedroom 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1247 ... and you also get your choice of bagel. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1248 My wife wanted more space. So we moved to the toaster. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1249 It's easier to get out of the toaster. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1250 Is it hot in here, or is it just me? 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1251 The dishwasher was full. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1252 Is a latté with three shots one wish, or three? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1253 I can't believe that you wished for a Pop Tart! 1.2687 0.07544 67 55 6 6
1254 Wi-Fi's out. Had to find another hotspot. 1.2687 0.05456 67 49 18 0
1255 Don't mind me, I was coma-toast. 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1256 Sorry, but lightly browned toast is harder than you might think. 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1257 I like my buns toasted! 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1258 Well... I think this arrangement makes the counter less cluttered. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1259 "Wait 'till you see what the coffee machine can do". 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1260 Seriously? You wished for a Pop Tart? 1.2687 0.07544 67 55 6 6
1261 OK, but after the Vita-Mix, I get the lamp back. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1262 I'm toast!......Kidding..... 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1263 Sorry, but my previous Master told me that if I showed up again, I'd be toast. 1.2676 0.06004 71 54 15 2
1264 Magic Toaster genies only grant one wish. I'm afraid the neti pot is all you'll get. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1265 What ? Now you want it buttered ? 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1266 Let's go over the 'wish' protocol one more time! 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1267 I checked.We're all out of the marble rye. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1268 I understand, but here I get toast and coffee 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1269 I've got the toast under control, shall I do the coffee next? 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1270 Sorry I'm late, I was using the sauna. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1271 I know it's smaller, but my rent is only $1500 a month. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1272 Don’t rub the coffee maker the wrong way. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1273 Two rooms, heat included. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1274 Jimmy then pondered the physical appearance of Mr. Coffee. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1275 I got cold 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1276 I prefer to stay toasty. 1.2615 0.07363 65 53 7 5
1277 Let me guess....you want avocado toast. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1278 For your final wish may I suggest a Vitamix? 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1279 White, multi-grain or sourdough? 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1280 I was cold, so what? 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1281 I've made coffee and washed the dishes. What's your third wish? 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1282 Don't just wish for a new filament. I could get you a brand new toaster. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1283 Sorry son, I stepped out for breakfast. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1284 Oh that's the OLD lamp. My new place has central heating. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1285 I've been looking for something with two bedrooms. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1286 Given the scary state of the world, I now work from remote locations. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1287 Oh, Sorry...apartment hunting... 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1288 And you don't even have to rub this one. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1289 The toaster is so much more open concept than the lamp. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1290 You still get all three; breakfast is part of the deal. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1291 If your wish happens to be toast, this is your lucky day! 1.2615 0.07363 65 53 7 5
1292 Your wish is my command but we're out of whole milk for your cappuccino. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1293 The toast is almost done, for your third and final wish should I start the coffee? 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1294 Kid, do you really want to waste one of your wishes on a lousy pop tart?? 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1295 I can grant you three wishes. But they have to be thinner than a bagel. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1296 Sorry, I burnt the pop tart you wanted. It's my first day. How about a free wish? 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1297 Actually it's quite roomy for Manhattan standards. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1298 Rub the lamp or I'm toast. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1299 Thanks. It was toasty in there! 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1300 Thanks, it's too hot in there. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1301 No, I am not the gluten-free genie! 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1302 Sorry - I got to get back home or I'm toast. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1303 You wished for a toaster oven that actually toasts. That appears to be impossible. Try this. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1304 I have a wish for you... can you clean out the crumbs? 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1305 Be careful with that thing. I almost got electrocuted. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1306 I like my new home, it's toastier. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1307 Dude, you got a lot of crumbs in there. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1308 It's rent controlled 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1309 I'm not going back in the bottle until I've had my coffee! 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1310 It's my summer home. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1311 For your third wish you should probably move beyond pop-tarts. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1312 Please tell Greg to stop trying to put pizza in here. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1313 Hey kid, I'm not your father's genie. 1.2615 0.05493 65 48 17 0
1314 Toastmasters - it's not just for public speaking. 1.2615 0.05493 65 48 17 0
1315 Three wishes. Light, medium, dark. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1316 'I came straight from the cloud, this must be the wrong IP address' 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1317 It's simple. This place offers heat. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1318 I'm Gene now." 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1319 It was a pop up decision. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1320 This way I can pop out easier. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1321 Well, I wish I could enjoy my coffee before we start. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1322 It's the new policy of non-assigned workplace. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1323 Is that Starbucks coffee? 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1324 Wait until you rub the coffee pot. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1325 What a crumby neighborhood. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1326 Ding. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1327 Coffee's not on the wish list until you're thirteen 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1328 I'm charging my phone. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1329 I’m working on my tan. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1330 Nice duplex. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1331 Don't waste a wish on that. Just buy a new one. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1332 It's got central heating. 1.2615 0.05493 65 48 17 0
1333 I might use the other slot as an office. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1334 Needs a new solenoid. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1335 Ever since I cut lamp oil from my diet I've had more energy and focus. 1.2615 0.05493 65 48 17 0
1336 You try living in the crummy place. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1337 The toaster is warmer. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1338 Back off kid, no Genie grants wishes before his first cup of coffee for the day! 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1339 At least in this thing I am warm and I get to pop out every little bit... 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1340 Sorry...I just can't handle a nonfat, five pump, double foam wish with this primitive equipment 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1341 Yes, but your three wishes are limited to poppy, sesame seed and garlic. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1342 I'm sorry but the bagel is really stuck in there. 1.2615 0.07363 65 53 7 5
1343 No! That's a tea pot and yes, I'm a genie in a toaster. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1344 Is strawberry jam your third wish? 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1345 You rub me the wrong way. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1346 Our genie's union negotiated better accommodations. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1347 Were you expecting a pop tart! 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1348 Sure, it lacks the same charm, but it's got central heating. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1349 Sorry, kid--coffee's self-service. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1350 I'll grant you 'four' wishes, if you put me on a separate circuit. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1351 You get three wishes and unlimited toast 1.2615 0.07363 65 53 7 5
1352 I relocated to a warmer place 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1353 I tried using the microwave, but my earrings lit up and blew the fuse. 1.2615 0.07363 65 53 7 5
1354 Because I've eco-shifted from oil lamp heating to electric. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1355 Now make a wish that does not involve me. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1356 Moved into a two bedroom, newer building but heat's included 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1357 Did you wish I would come out of the Toaster, instead? 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1358 I'm used to a warmer climate. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1359 I am an itsy-bitsy, teenie-weenie, Caption Contest toaster genie. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1360 You have three wishes; light, medium and dark. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1361 Well, you just burned through one wish. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1362 "New amps for old". 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1363 No, I'm Genie, not Siri! 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1364 No guarantees on your wishes until I've had my coffee. 1.2615 0.05493 65 48 17 0
1365 I use the second bedroom for an office. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1366 I'm from the temp agency. 1.2615 0.07363 65 53 7 5
1367 Are you sure you asked for a Roadster? 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1368 Would you mind using one of your wishes to get me out of this toaster? 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1369 Well, I wish you'd clean out the crumb tray once in while! 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1370 Why, kid? Because you just rub me the wrong way, that's why. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1371 Sure, but you must first provide a credit card and agree to the terms and conditions etched in inside the lamp. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1372 What is your wish? Light, medium, or well done? 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1373 Three Wishes and this is the best you can do? 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1374 Put the lamp away, kid--I'm not going to indulge you in your childish stereotypes. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1375 Here's a wish, I wish you'd stop putting everything bagels in here. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1376 Sorry, I was visiting my neighbors. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1377 This is my summer house. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1378 If you wanted Barbara Eden you should have asked for Jeannie with a J. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1379 That's ONE! 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1380 I had to move out while the place was being painted. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1381 Cream and sugar count as two separate wishes. 1.2615 0.07363 65 53 7 5
1382 I'm upgrading my user interface. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1383 The lamp was nice, but now I'm in an all-electric kitchen. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1384 We don't support those anymore. THIS thing is already, like, three upgrades old. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1385 This didn’t happen before you installed the IoT upgrade. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1386 You can wish, but I'm still going to burn the toast. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1387 The toaster wished for three more wishes. 1.2615 0.07363 65 53 7 5
1388 New Genie Rules: You get 3 wishes, buy the first 2 have to be toast and coffee. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1389 I'm the breakfast genie...you can only ask for coffee, toast and eggs. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1390 Your Alexa keeps the thermostat down too low. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1391 I am here to grant you three slices. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1392 We all have wishes, kid. I wish I had a bagel setting. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1393 You caught me while I was at my Airbnb. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1394 I will grant you three waffles. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1395 Utilities are included. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1396 The crumb tray is clear. That's one. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1397 That pop-tart's totally stuck - just wish for your mom not to freak out. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1398 I guess he wasn't kidding when he tweeted he was going to add magic lamps to the travel ban. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1399 I'm a very well-bred genii. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1400 Ive been tanning - what did Trump do today? 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1401 It was supposed to be a congratulatory toast. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1402 Oh, you found it. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1403 I don't care what Aladdin got. I grant 3 dishes. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1404 Didn't you get my change of address email? 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1405 There is an App for that now. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1406 Look kid, I'm a genie, not the Maytag repair man. Why don't you just wish for a new toaster? 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1407 If you just want to know when the coffee is ready, ask Alexa. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1408 Hey dude! You rubbed me the wrong way. 1.2615 0.07363 65 53 7 5
1409 You are granted three pieces of toast. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1410 I will grant you three wishes - one light, one dark, and one medium. 1.2615 0.06678 65 51 11 3
1411 But this one has central heating. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1412 Unlimited Pop-Tarts? Really? 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1413 Yes, but I'm the genie of BURNING desires. 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1414 Look! ...This is the third time today, and I still can't figure out Health Care! 1.2615 0.07029 65 52 9 4
1415 Your second wish is toast. 1.2615 0.07363 65 53 7 5
1416 I much prefer the warmth of this two-bedroom. 1.2615 0.06308 65 50 13 2
1417 You're too young to invoke the coffee genie, son. 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1418 It's bigger on the inside... 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1419 I'm fine with the toaster if you're going to use it for a Netie pot. 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1420 I know it seems strange, but this way I get to hang out with my friend Mr. Coffee during downtime. 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1421 Yea, it's roomier, but most important is that the coffee maker is right next to it. 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1422 I moved to the toaster. It's warmer and no one eber cleans the outsides 1.2581 0.07249 62 50 8 4
1423 Well, I have to tell you , all your dreams are toast ! 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1424 What? You were waiting for the Muffin Man. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1425 Any three toppings on your bagel. 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1426 This one's no good, it's been hacked by the Russians. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1427 Stereotype me, fine, but you do NOT get to assume Mr. Coffee's gender 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1428 Toss the lamp; I'm going solar next week. 1.2581 0.05603 62 46 16 0
1429 I'll give you first and last months' rent on the oil lamp. 1.2581 0.07249 62 50 8 4
1430 We phased out the lamp in 1929. Jeannie had dibs on the last bottle, and after that the boss wanted to modernize. 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1431 Wish granted! I'm your new dad. Now go ask your mom to buy some Arabian blend. 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1432 I'd have come sooner if you texted me. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1433 I don't get reception in there either. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1434 This had better be important. It was nice and toasty in there. 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1435 Your wish is my crummand! 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1436 You expect me to go back in that lamp, without a crumb to eat? 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1437 How about... one wish, a magic carpet ride and I’ll throw in the appliances, too? 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1438 I'm in here now; just don't rub it while I'm 'toasting a muffin,' if you get my meaning." 1.2581 0.07249 62 50 8 4
1439 Yes, I'm still granting three wishes. But they all have to be for continental breakfast. 1.2581 0.07605 62 51 6 5
1440 I dream of genie with the light brown toast. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1441 It's not that I don't like you, you just rub me the wrong way. 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1442 I will grant you 3 toasts. 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1443 About time you cleaned this toaster 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1444 Look, kid, let me explain the new Terms of Service over coffee, okay? 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1445 Are you sure you want to waste a wish on making coffee with the toaster? The coffee machine is right there! 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1446 Let the toastmaster have the honor to introduce you to a few kitchen appliances. 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1447 Your wish is toast. 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1448 Look, I'm sure you've got a very good genie in there, I'm just saying: "do you like bread?" 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1449 And her last wish was that I use a toaster from now on. 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1450 The toaster has free WiFi. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1451 Any chance you wish for a decent cup of coffee? 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1452 Sorry, kid. Best I can do is grant you three ... uh, two pieces of toast. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1453 Yes , your wish is my command but pop tarts ? Really ? 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1454 You preferred it when there wasn't a password?? 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1455 We're up and running on electricity now, but our real goal is to go wireless. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1456 Does this mean I get toast from this lamp? 1.2581 0.05603 62 46 16 0
1457 Kid, if you're still here when my master comes home, we're both toast. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1458 It's an open sesame and shut case. 1.2581 0.07249 62 50 8 4
1459 I got stuck in a bagel. 1.2581 0.05603 62 46 16 0
1460 You have one remaining wish: lightly toasted, medium, or well-done. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1461 I was wishing for an Eggo 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1462 Nah, you can keep the lamp, it's nice and toasty in here. 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1463 Of course I left. You don't rub me anymore. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1464 Just to be clear, was that toasted bagel wish supposed to be part of your inner monologue? 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1465 I now offer wishes with the additional options of light, bagel, and extra crispy. 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1466 You do know there's an IHOP right around the corner, don't you? 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1467 Well I wish we had some better coffee around here but you don't see me bothering you about it. 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1468 Do I look like Mr. Coffee? 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1469 Ha ha, yes, very funny, "make the toast genie." Now change your mother back from the coffee machine. 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1470 Actually, you can only wish for toast or a Pop Tart. 1.2581 0.06056 62 47 14 1
1471 Ever since my AA pledge, I just can't hit the bottle anymore. 1.2581 0.07249 62 50 8 4
1472 Your toast is my command. 1.2581 0.06478 62 48 12 2
1473 You've got three wishes. But first, can I have some coffee? 1.2581 0.06874 62 49 10 3
1474 Just a mix up at the factory - they make garage door openers too 1.2581 0.05603 62 46 16 0
1475 It's really jammed in there. Wish for something else. 1.2576 0.05838 66 50 15 1
1476 Anyway, after I got priced out of the lamp, I tried the coffee maker, but My Doctor told me to cut back on caffeine...but I really like the neighborhood so here I am 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1477 Perfectly browned toast every time as you wish, master -- and I cleaned out the crumb tray. What other miracles do you desire? 1.2549 0.06163 51 38 13 0
1478 I don't do well done. 1.2549 0.06163 51 38 13 0
1479 Sorry, back now. I was making breakfast. 1.2549 0.06163 51 38 13 0
1480 Cool! Both the lamp and the toaster have blue tooth! 1.2549 0.06770 51 39 11 1
1481 What, you were expecting Jesus? 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1482 Are heating and electric included? 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1483 I grant thee two magnificent slices of lightly browned rye. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1484 Sublet the old one. This one has heat included and a pool within wafting distance. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1485 No need; the power has been restored. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1486 Yes, I would love some tea. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1487 Careful. You have a bagel setting and two more. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1488 I'm sorry there's nothing I can do about that pop-tart 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1489 Every time I come out of there I'm up all night 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
1490 I can't grant three wishes anymore but I toast a nice bagel. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1491 Better health care. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1492 Before we do this, could I get an espresso? 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1493 Check it out. I've got central heat! 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1494 Way back when, I got a scholarship to NYU, and now I can't resist bagels. 1.2500 0.05637 60 45 15 0
1495 Mom says that I can't grant any wishes until you clean out the crumb tray. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1496 Man, am I glad your back with my repaired lamp. In 5 days absolutely no one has rubbed this toaster! 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1497 I prefer a dry heat. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1498 Lamp, toaster, ... no difference, they're all connected now. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1499 So, you were expecting toast??? 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1500 I can't bring people back form the dead, make them fall in love, or make your toast not slightly burnt. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1501 Most guys would ask for a billion dollars, so it's kind of refreshing to grant a wish to clean out the toaster. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1502 I've told you before, rub twice for coffee. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1503 Lamp Genie had to go out of town on business. I’m taking his messages. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1504 Well, I wish you would clean out the crumb tray every once in a while. 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1505 Next time can you rub the coffee maker? I haven't had a cup in over a century. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1506 If you think this is weird, you should see the coffee genie. 1.2500 0.05637 60 45 15 0
1507 Okay, all the gross crumbs are gone. What's your second wish? 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1508 You may have anything you wish...light...medium....or dark. 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1509 It's a better location and the heat's included in the rent 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1510 Do not say avocado toast. 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1511 Beware, the toaster oven is a Pandora's box." 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1512 The bottle was occupied. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1513 Your wish is my command! As long as it's light, medium or dark. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1514 Sorry, small change in venue. You have three wishes that somehow include toast or toastiness. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1515 So, it's a deal. You let me live in the coffee maker and I'll work things out with your babysitter. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1516 Perfect coffee. Your next two wishes? 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1517 OK, so I popped out of the toaster. Two wishes left. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1518 Now go rub all of the dishes in the sink. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1519 Okay, the toaster's fixed. What's your next wish? 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1520 "You're telling me your first wish was for a Keurig"? 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1521 Dude, I just want toast. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1522 Word of advice, be careful of what comes out of the coffee pot when you rub it 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1523 I'm going to give you a Mulligan since you are new at this. Think bigger than a Pop Tart as one of your three wishes. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1524 I had to move out of the lamp - the rent was too high. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1525 I found it a lot warmer than that cold metal lamp. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1526 This is my winter home. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1527 Kid, that's a pretty tall order for a genie who hasn't even had his first cup of coffee yet. You do know Ivanka's married, right? 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1528 Your sauna's broken. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1529 The lamp only gave me a small spark, while I get really charged up from the toaster. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1530 Crumbs are all out. What's your second wish? 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1531 White, rye or pumpernickel? 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1532 Hang on, I gotta warm up for a minute. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1533 Thank God! It was getting a little toasty in there. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1534 I was just working on my tan. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1535 I upgraded, kid. Finally have free roaming. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1536 You did wish for a hot date with Genie. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1537 Apparently, you couldn’t put the genie back in the bottle. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1538 Sorry, pal. I know you freed me and all, but 'unlimited pumpkin spice coffee creamer' is where I draw the line. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1539 You sure you want to use your last wish on Pop-Tarts? 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1540 Yeah, trying a fourth wish means you're toast. 1.2500 0.05637 60 45 15 0
1541 And will that be regular or decaf? 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1542 I was sold on its' pop up feature. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1543 No, you can't but me back in the bottle. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
1544 Before I sign on this new place, is heat included? 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1545 I'd love to turn him back into a reality show host, but you already used your third one on "I wish there was a clown in the Office" 1.2500 0.07748 60 50 5 5
1546 I am a free range genie. The lamp was too confining. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1547 Try 'open robusta' 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1548 Look kid, no wishes OR toast before I've had my coffee... 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1549 Thanks for letting me warm up in the toaster, you wouldn't believe how cold it gets in that lamp. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1550 This makes it easier to just pop up 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1551 Is it too late for last week's contest? I only got my magazine yesterday! I wanted to submit a caption for the lady on the phone with all the men standing about, "I need to report the 3-D printer not working right again." 1.2500 0.08181 52 43 5 4
1552 I wished for the coffee genie. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1553 Sorry. I just moved into this new two-room apartment. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1554 Hey, it beats a Pop Tart. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1555 The lamp just seemed dated. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1556 Hi, I'm Ali. My brother"s on night shift. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1557 I fixed your toaster. That's wish #1. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1558 If he ever comes out, tell him that toaster genie's looking for him 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1559 Pumpernickel, rye, or whole wheat? 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1560 I've redirected my traffic to the toaster. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1561 If you're surprised to see me, wait until you see the family living in the coffee maker. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1562 Young man, when I was your age, I was the toast of the town. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1563 Please don't take me back to Walmart. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1564 Due to our austerity program, the genie of the lamp was let go, and you only get two wishes. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1565 Put that damn thing down before you hurt sombody! 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1566 What can I say, the lamp gets cold this time of year. 1.2500 0.07748 60 50 5 5
1567 Whats it going to be, immortality or avocado toast? 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1568 My wish is that you empty the crumb tray! 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1569 The guy in the coffee maker? He's crazy. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1570 no I wished for bikini models by the dozen. Not a genie in a toaster oven. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1571 So. I'm the substitute. What's your wish? 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1572 Wrong lamp--you wanted decaf genie. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1573 Lamp, toaster... anything beats being a diaper genie. 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1574 Try rubbing the oven 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1575 It's a dry heat - arthritis runs in the family. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1576 Alexa sent me. 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1577 “rub that thing one more time and you’re toast”… 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1578 Three wishes: white, rye, or whole wheat! 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1579 Rub the lamp all you want. I'm telling you, in winter, rub the toaster. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1580 Nobody wanted you know this... 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1581 This is my winter home, it's much more toasty in here. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1582 They call it "the internet of things". 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1583 You can have four wishes as long as one of them is a cup of coffee for me. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1584 Really? Leg go your Eggo? 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1585 Hey, genies get old too...I've moved to a warmer climate. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1586 Hey, you rub it ten times--I come out of your butt. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1587 I wish you weren't a stereotype. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1588 My lamp got hacked. Moved to the cloud and channel through toaster. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1589 I know, I said I preferred it toasty warm, but I didn't mean it literally... 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1590 So, a properly toasted bagel is in your top three? 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1591 Believe it or not, the rent is way cheaper. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1592 It's because you rub me the wrong way. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1593 Dude, this isn’t Aladdin, I’m not granting you sh**. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1594 What? I was hungry. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1595 So many kids were asking for Pop Tarts that I just come out of the toaster now. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1596 First, make the coffee. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1597 OK roaches gone. You get two more. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1598 The lamp’s Wi-Fi is down, so lucky you have a smart toaster. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1599 I am NOT toast 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1600 The rent is cheaper, and the heat's better. But can you wish me a vacuum? 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1601 Yeah, I'm trying to stay with the times. Thinking of moving up to the juice extractor next. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1602 Now put that lamp away. It's not a toy. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1603 Forget that. My sister's in the blender. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1604 Listen kid, if all you want are pop tarts, just go to the supermarket. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1605 Cleaning the crumbs out of the toaster? I do wishes not miracles. 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1606 You still have 3 wishes, they just have to be breakfast-related 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1607 Now I am the genie of the toaster, your wishes come with a one year manufacturer's warranty. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1608 Hey, you said to pop up. Two more to go. 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1609 Just to be clear, your wish is that I turn into cotton-candy flavored pop-tarts? 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1610 What? It's my summer home. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1611 I'll grant you three bagels. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1612 Got any coffee? Long day. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1613 I know you're upset you only get 3 wishes, but saying "this genie is toast" was uncalled for. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1614 When the lamp genii defeated me he said: You're toast! If you want him, try the coffee pot. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1615 I've found a flat with more room. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1616 If you want room for cream that's gonna count as another wish. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1617 You think I was just going to stay in there and wait for you to rub? 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1618 No number of wishes guarantees that your toast won't be burnt. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1619 Sorry kid, I've been electric only since Newport '65. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1620 But first coffee. 1.2500 0.05637 60 45 15 0
1621 Anything about girls - talk to the guy in the microwave. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1622 Mr Coffee could use a cleaning too. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1623 You can use your other two wishes for toast. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1624 You know, I could just make you coffee 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1625 Thanks for getiing me out. Much longer in there and I would've been toast. 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1626 This won't work. I need a place that's gluten-free. 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1627 2 BR, central heating, elevator, next to a coffee shop. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1628 You should check with the dishwasher genie, he might be able to grant that wish. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1629 You really want me to come out of the coffee machine for your last wish? 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1630 It's a rent-controlled toaster. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1631 Just wait until you find out where your toast is! 1.2500 0.07748 60 50 5 5
1632 What’s with the decaf? 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1633 I'm over here this week. I wanted to vacation someplace warm. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1634 My attorney told me that she gets it all. Cool if I crash here? 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1635 Sorry kid - Aladdin doesn't do bagels. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1636 So just hit the lever and a Pop Tart will come out. Now what's your second wish? 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1637 So your three wishes are a Pizza Pocket, Eggo and a Pop Tart 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1638 Rub it again, I need coffee. 1.2500 0.06118 60 46 13 1
1639 Kid, you can rub your mother's gravy boat all you want, but I'm still the genie of her breakfast appliances. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1640 Oh sure it is more spacious than that old lamp, but the neighbors are real crumbs. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1641 You dream of Genie, I dream of a decent cup of coffee. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1642 I'm sick of Darjeeling. I want Arabica. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1643 Jesus man, when was the last time you cleaned that thing? 1.2500 0.07374 60 49 7 4
1644 It's a time share. 1.2500 0.06981 60 48 9 3
1645 PLEASE open up the lamp, its hot as hell over here! 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1646 If you wanted toast, you should've rubbed the breadbox. 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1647 I got your coffee maker wish fulfilled. Can I now have my house back ? 1.2500 0.06563 60 47 11 2
1648 We'll, I am sure you've heard of the kitchen magician. 1.2462 0.05814 65 50 14 1
1649 The Roll Is Stuck ! 1.2459 0.06468 61 48 11 2
1650 Trade you the toaster and a wish for the Lamp? 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1651 This offers much better connectivity 1.2414 0.05668 58 44 14 0
1652 I'm gong back into the lamp, I can't adjust to this all-electric environment. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1653 Did you say gluten free? 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1654 To change settings on the lamp, just click the switch one time to the left from "waffles" to "wishes." 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1655 Sorry, my GPS has been a little off lately. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1656 You get three gluten-free wishes. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1657 I know kid, but this model comes with its own elevator. 1.2414 0.05668 58 44 14 0
1658 I know what you asked for...but, I can only give you "the toast of the town"! 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1659 Well, I wish that your coffee was fresh. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1660 You forgot to blug it in. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1661 Let this be a lesson to you, son. Never trust those jokers at Toastmasters. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1662 Thank you, for awhile I thought I was toast. 1.2414 0.07505 58 48 6 4
1663 Lamps are so yesterday. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1664 Thanks for the release. I was burning up in there. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1665 This is the only place I can afford since the lamp got genietrified. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1666 I'm the built-in appliance genie, making sure your toaster doesn't work too well or last too long. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1667 Why would you waste a wish asking for a Pop-Tart? 1.2414 0.07505 58 48 6 4
1668 I'm a "rules were meant to be broken" kinda guy. 1.2414 0.05668 58 44 14 0
1669 . . . and the heat's included. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1670 White,Wheat or Sourdough? 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1671 "The crumbs are gone and I've cleaned the coffee filter; but I can't clean your room- some things even a genie won't do". 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1672 Toast's burnt. Sorry, that was your third wish. 1.2414 0.05668 58 44 14 0
1673 I upgraded to a two bedroom with heat. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1674 Because it's warmer in there. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1675 No. Still my first wish. Starting again. When I toast my parents at their anniversary dinner, I'd like you to fill the air with coloured smoke and sparkly stuff. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1676 I'm more accustomed to a warmer climate. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1677 Three wishes. Two slices. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1678 Uhhhh, I was just getting warmed up in there. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1679 You can adjust the darkness of your wishes in this one. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1680 Your wish was for a HOT genie. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1681 With all my smart new friends , the lamp is passe 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1682 That Pop Tart flavor is beyond even my power. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1683 O.K. All warmed up now. So, what can I do for you? 1.2414 0.05668 58 44 14 0
1684 Keep rubbing that thing and you’ll be toast 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1685 Wishes not questions. It's 2017. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1686 I'm sorry. Your appliance is incompatible with our Master's lifestyle. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1687 Wishes? No, I just do toast. You want Dennis but he's out to lunch. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1688 Let go of my EGO. 1.2414 0.07505 58 48 6 4
1689 Sorry, wrong number, rub 123 - 4567 for the coffee genie 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1690 You're going to want to give that a minute. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1691 Well you wished for a lot of bread didn't you? 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1692 Try it again. The parental controls don't allow Pop Tarts. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1693 Hey, what can I say? The oil lamp is so yesterday. By the way, you need to clean out the crumbs in there. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1694 For an extra wish, the Property Brothers upgraded my space. The closets are amazing. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1695 I'm the new medical insurance genie for the Republican health plan. What symptom would you like? 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1696 It's not there. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1697 Oh. Because with this, I get wi-fi! 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1698 I'll take it! I'd been looking to upsize for centuries. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1699 Shall I butter it too ? 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1700 Just nothing about the MTA 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1701 Wishing that I lived in the toaster was not your best option. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1702 No the rule is: The one thing you cannot wish for is more bread. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1703 $5,000 is a bit much for a 2 bedroom. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1704 Oh yeah. Lamps are going thru a real gentrification situation right now. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1705 I can grant you one of three settings-light, medium or dark 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1706 With great power comes the need to be connected to the power. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1707 Sorry, we no longer grant wishes, but I can offer you evenly toasted bagels in six delightful flavors. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1708 I'm lovin' my new vacation rental, but I'm glad you called. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1709 Don't complain. If it were 1990 this could be a sitcom. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1710 I was out with the guys last night and forgot where I was. Guess you could say I got Toasted!! 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1711 Can we see what IKEA has? 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1712 Your wish is my command. Rye, raisin, or whole wheat? 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1713 I'm outta 7-grain. You want rye? 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1714 Sorry, as Genie of the Toaster I can only fulfill your wishes for level of darkness. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1715 I liked the lamp, but this is a sanctuary toaster. 1.2414 0.07505 58 48 6 4
1716 Honey or Jam? 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1717 Spit it out kid,I don't have a green card, this toaster is my last chance to stick around. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1718 Onion or cinnamon? 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1719 Toasters are the new lamps. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1720 I'm getting good money for doing "pop-ups"! 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1721 If you rub me the wrong way, I won't let go of your Eggo. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1722 Can we check out a four slicer with a downtown view next? 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1723 Yeah? Well I'm wishing for something other than decaf right now. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1724 You have three choices---light, dark or bagel setting. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1725 Do you have any Earl Grey? 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1726 Poppin' Fresh? 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1727 Take it from me. Rub that lamp and you'll be toast. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1728 Are you nuts? Clean your own toaster! 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1729 'It's not in there , do you want me to check the coffeee machine ?' 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1730 My three wishes consist of whole wheat, sourdough and rye. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1731 You try living without heat in the winter 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1732 You have one remaining appliance request left. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1733 The heat went out in my lamp. 1.2414 0.05668 58 44 14 0
1734 We're re-branding. Hand-rubbed lamps are uncomfortably suggestive. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1735 You rub me the wrong way. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1736 After I left the lamp I changed my name to Bernie...get it? 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1737 Your only wish is for better coffee? 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1738 Keep the lamp. I found a new home that's warmer. 1.2414 0.05668 58 44 14 0
1739 On the bright side - I just pop out instead of rubbing the lamp. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1740 Sorry kid. Your wishes have been limited to light, medium, or burnt. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1741 I wish you'd polish something else. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1742 When the boy wished for help waking for the school bus in the morning, the lazy genie condescendingly pointed toward the coffeemaker. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1743 I'm still a step up from the Genie of the Dishwasher; with him you only get three dishes. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1744 Next time you clean the toaster. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1745 If you're done polishing the lamp can you make another pot of coffee? 1.2414 0.07505 58 48 6 4
1746 Not wishes. Choices. Rye, wheat, or white? 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1747 The microwave was full. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1748 Just once I wish you'd take *my* wishes into account! 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1749 Sorry, kid. The lamp is plastic and I live in a toaster---so no wishes. But I CAN offer you $10 in Kohl cash. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1750 Frankly, that's an offensive stereotype. Plus, you can't get 4G in a lamp. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1751 Just tell your mother you burnt the toast 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1752 This way, I'm accessible through the Genie app. Plus I get to pop up dramatically instead of materializing out of a puff of smoke. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1753 Did or did you not say I was the best thing to happen to you since sliced bread? 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1754 What, you think your toast just pops up on its own? Let me guess, you also believe no one knows it is you reheating salmon in the microwave every day. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1755 Keep it. I'm the toast of the town now. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1756 I grant you three wishes - light, burnt, or golden brown. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1757 I granted the last guy a skinny, latte, salted caramel, mocca, frappuccino, Americano, Doppio, Espresso so I'm out of soy. 1.2414 0.07505 58 48 6 4
1758 I can grant any three wishes...unless you wish for toast. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1759 THINK BEYOND POP TARTS !! 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1760 I moved to a warmer climate, once I had enough bread to afford it. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1761 You calling me your POPTART? 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1762 Brilliant idea, kid. Turns out that if you keep me in the toaster you get FOUR wishes. Shall we try the coffee maker next? 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1763 Genie's have to be plugged in now. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1764 It's rent controlled 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1765 It's not only more temperate but the pop-up function makes for a perfectly accessible exit. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1766 Be very specific -- or you get toast. 1.2414 0.07505 58 48 6 4
1767 I'll give you a fourth wish if you rub the coffee pot. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1768 Look, I'll grant you three wishes but you have to clean the crumb tray 1.2414 0.07505 58 48 6 4
1769 'I've clearly been burned in this deal.' 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1770 I was trying to get out of my comfort zone 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1771 I'm toast? Is that your wish? 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1772 Yeah, I know. But it's my winter house. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1773 This is much less cramped. Should've done it 1001 nights ago. 1.2414 0.06179 58 45 12 1
1774 I identify more with the toaster 1.2414 0.07505 58 48 6 4
1775 As you wished but I’m toast. You’ll have to make your own coffee. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1776 White buns only look good on hamburgers. 1.2414 0.07090 58 47 8 3
1777 Keep your lamp ... This is all electric , and I only have to grant two wishes ... 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1778 I couldn't pass it up. Heat and trash included and the cafe next door has Free Trade French Roast. 1.2414 0.06650 58 46 10 2
1779 Rub it again. My wives are in the coffee. 1.2414 0.07505 58 48 6 4
1780 Toaster's fixed. That's one. Want me to work on the coffeemaker? 1.2373 0.06549 59 47 10 2
1781 Master, Please don't request onion bagels again. 1.2373 0.06549 59 47 10 2
1782 I thought you'd be happy for me. 1.2373 0.06549 59 47 10 2
1783 I'm sorry I'm only IOS 10.3. IOS 11 is the coffee pot. 1.2373 0.06549 59 47 10 2
1784 Next time, rub harder. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1785 I'd wish for a Keurig if I were you. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1786 I was cold, so I spent the night in the toaster. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1787 Have you ever had Bailey's with coffee? I'd wish for that if I was you, but whatever, you do you. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1788 You wouldn't believe who I met in the crumb tray. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1789 Do you have any vacancies in your lamp? This place is crumby. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1790 Two Pop-Tarts counts as two wishes. Wish carefully. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1791 Let me get this straight. Instead of world peace or a billion dollars, you want a lifetime supply of Pop Tarts? 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1792 It's toastier in here. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1793 You'll need a different last wish; this only holds two slices. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1794 I upgraded to a contemporary two bedroom unit 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1795 No coffee before your wish? 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1796 Upgrading to wireless was huge mistake. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1797 I can't grant you three wishes, but I can grant you three slices. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1798 Sorry, missed my stop. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1799 It's got wi-fi 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1800 Hey,I'm on vacation! 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1801 Master-Schmaster! I'm staying in here until you get the heat in the lamp fixed. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1802 "FYI, were out of bagels"! 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1803 Sorry, but I need my coffee first. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1804 Okay...so your bagels will no longer get stuck. But now wouldn't you rather have a million dollars than just "a decent cup of coffee"? 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1805 Technically, your first wish was for toast. Whole wheat and peanut butter are extra. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1806 Well, popping out was a long time ago. I popup now. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1807 I pop out to the toaster, that's the coffee creamer. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1808 It's crossover technology. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1809 Our attorneys say just until we decide who gets the lamp. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1810 Wait, did you wish for white, wheat, or rye? 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1811 I thought you wished for being a Toastmaster. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1812 What were you expecting, pop-tart? 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1813 You rubbed the wrong thing, buddy! 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1814 Surprised ? Look around young man because you never know what's in store with all this new stuff. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1815 Do you mind changing the settings to low heat? 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1816 You make a wish. I'll make a toast. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1817 They tied me up and left me on ‘bagel.’ 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1818 Sorry, our new union rules limit you to just one wish. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1819 What? You've never heard of a kitchen genie? 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1820 Before you start with your 3 wishes, I need coffee stat...what? No Kuerig?? Okay, so you have 2 wishes left. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1821 This one features a tanning bed. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1822 When I said I wish you could pop up when I need you, I didn't mean this. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1823 Thanks. It was about to get hot in there. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1824 The microwave genie grants faster wishes. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1825 Hey, I was cold 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1826 You think you could plug in the toaster? 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1827 I'm doing you a favor. No more rubbing. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1828 You could have given me a "heads up" about the blender. 1.2321 0.07641 56 47 5 4
1829 Thanks, it was getting a little toasty in there. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1830 Sorry, but I'm just your're toaster's Siri update. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1831 Why did you waste your wish on a home cooked breakfast, when you could have gone out to any fast food restaurant? 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1832 After your last wish backfired, you said I was toast, remember? 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1833 I'm past due for an oil change. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1834 I decided to winterize my home... 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1835 No rubbing required! Just set it on "bagel." 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1836 People don't rub a hot surface as much. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1837 You can't ask for more slices. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1838 Say goodbye to bachelor life; this will make the greatest avocado toast. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1839 I said, "give me the things I want THE MOST- not to toast! 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1840 I'm all turned around, do you know how to get to the blender? 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1841 You did wish for smart appliances 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1842 Sorry, I can't make the perfect toast for you either 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1843 Two heated bedrooms? I'll take it. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1844 We all have wishes that end us up in the toaster if we aren't careful. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1845 My wife got everything in the divorce except for this toaster and that coffeemaker, so don't pester me with your lame 3 wishes. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1846 Since it's your last wish, I'd probably go a little deeper. Maybe instead of, 'toast,' you should wish for, 'buttered toast.' 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1847 " Burning your brothers' toast is NOT a good wish choice". 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1848 It has internet 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1849 Where is my toaster strudel? 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1850 Sorry, I was having breakfast. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1851 I haven't even had my coffee yet! 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1852 "You rub the lamp & I pop up!"? 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1853 The dry heat is better for my allergies. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1854 So you see, after your third wish, I'm toast.. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1855 Catch up son. Genies moved from static electricity to alternating current when your great grand parents were your age. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1856 Newest App 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1857 It's not that I didn't like the lamp, but you can't beat my new place for making crostini. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1858 Use that as your Neti Pot and I'll move back in." 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1859 Homeland Security is cracking down on lamps. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1860 Bob had always dreamed of becoming a toastmaster... 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1861 Sorry, I was on vacation on the west toast. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1862 Love the bronze lamp. Back in the day . . . 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1863 You'll need a power strip before making the third wish. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1864 You should see how much the coffee pot charges for rent. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1865 you get three wishes, but we're out of pumpernickel." 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1866 Toasted to an even doneness edge to edge? Impossible! 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1867 I got stuck in the crumb tray. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1868 I can also clean the coffee maker, if you wish. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1869 Look kid, each slice counts as a wish. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1870 I spend my winters there. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1871 You've no idea how cold it gets in that lamp! 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1872 I disobeyed; that’s why I’m toast. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1873 The pop up thing is much quicker and more up to date. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1874 Hey, you rubbed me the wrong way. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1875 Sorry to startle you but I just had to get away from my life as a diaper genie. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1876 I'm a brand ambassador, kid. I go where the bread is. 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1877 I fixed the coffee maker and now the toaster. One more wish left. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1878 You have one of three wishes. Light, medium, or dark toast? 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1879 Can I borrow a wish? I think Joe DiMaggio's still in the Mr. Coffee. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1880 OK. I got out the bagel you stuffed in there. And your last wish? 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1881 Forget the lamp, I've moved to where it's ...pardon the pun, toastier. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1882 Look, you've already burned through one wish. Bagel or waffle? 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1883 Are you wondering what happened to your english muffin? 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1884 It's a smart toaster 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1885 Who are you calling a pop tart? 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1886 The GPS took me to the toaster. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1887 There is nothing wrong with the address; it was the GPS. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1888 I prefer electrical heating to oil. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1889 Don't tell me you forgot how to make toast again! 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1890 either get me a wi-fi connection or push me back in 1.2321 0.07203 56 46 7 3
1891 I don't do Pop-Tarts, kid. Try me for stone-ground gluten-free multi-grain whole wheat. 1.2321 0.05693 56 43 13 0
1892 It's not exactly traditional, but you can't beat the cost of living. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1893 The toaster had wi-fi. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1894 I don't do breakfast. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1895 The heating system is better. 1.2321 0.06237 56 44 11 1
1896 So... I found Aladdin this kitchen. 1.2321 0.06738 56 45 9 2
1897 I've relocated; it's toasty in there. 1.2281 0.06140 57 45 11 1
1898 Anything except that the toast comes out the same way every time. 1.2281 0.07088 57 47 7 3
1899 Sorry I couldn't fix your oven... But here's a toaster. 1.2281 0.06140 57 45 11 1
1900 Son, I just burned my ass on a hot wire. If you want avocado on your toast, you can put it there yourself. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
1901 Kid, If it's not in the toaster, i don't know where the fuck it is. It's not in the toaster or the coffee maker. I am a genie, I can just make you a new penis, you know? 1.2241 0.07396 58 49 5 4
1902 Don't you wish we had some bagels? 1.2241 0.05523 58 45 13 0
1903 Hi Ali, I’m your Baba 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1904 I thought you said this was crummy. It's actually quite toasty! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1905 Ask for a sesame bagel and you will get a sesame bagel. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1906 As for your first wish, your new toaster will arrive within three business days. Free shipping. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1907 My bottle is going condo. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1908 Don't waste another wish. That toast just isn't coming about. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1909 You need to upgrade. Two left. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1910 Welcome, I am your Toastmaster today! The theme of our meeting is lamps. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1911 Ask them to change the filter already! 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1912 I checked it, kid. There ain't no pop tart in there. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
1913 This one is roomy with a burnt smell I can get used to. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1914 What did you expect, when you rub me the wrong way? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1915 Sorry kid, but putting me here was your parents idea. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1916 The lamp is old news. I like to pop up anywhere. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1917 Next time unplug the damn toaster. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1918 At least it's a duplex. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1919 The sauna's okay but you need to clean the hot tub. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1920 Do three wishes by the end of this week, or I'm toast. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1921 Listen, I can take the heat. Toaster Genie. Coffee Genie, bring it. Either one's an improvement over being the Diaper Genie for 25 years. 1.2222 0.07782 54 46 4 4
1922 The duplex feature was nice, but the lamp is just more roomy. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1923 Let's try this again. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
1924 Forget about the wishes, I’m toast. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1925 You still get the wishes, kid—the damn lamp just rubs me the wrong way. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1926 Granted, but first, can I get a fresh pot? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1927 Whew! That was a long nap. Can you crank up that coffee pot? 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1928 I foresee a blown breaker in your near future 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1929 Decaf will cost you another wish. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1930 You can wish all you want, but nothin's gonna happen 'cause I'm still on their 'No-Fly List'! 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1931 I'm supposed to grant you three wishes, but I'm way too toasted. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1932 What? This is my new pop-up shop. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1933 OK, homework, sure. Right. But first- these Pop Tarts are incredible. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1934 ...and you were expecting Pop-Tarts? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1935 I took a hundred shits in your toaster. 1.2222 0.07782 54 46 4 4
1936 Three? That's nothing. I'll give you 4 wishes and throw in a perfectly toasted sesame bagel at no extra charge. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1937 OK, the element is fixed. You have two left. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1938 I'm just checking out some modern options to update my image. After all, that lamp IS over 2000 years old. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1939 Heat is included with the rent. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1940 It's the 21st century. Genies aren't confined to "bottles" 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1941 Eliminate cockroaches? Sorry, I do't do miracles. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1942 We've gone electronic 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1943 You're out of the Arabic Roast. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1944 Because the toaster has Bluetooth. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1945 Come on, kid. I fixed the toaster and the coffee maker. Are you sure you want to spend your third on the can opener? You want to check with your parents? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1946 Market testing shows this just works better than the lamp. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1947 Toast or coffee would be the most easy for me. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1948 More square footage, upgraded heating, and free continental breakfast. What's not to like? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1949 Now that I'm dry after going through the dishwasher, let's have coffee. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1950 Just one wish. Dark roast! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1951 Your wish is granted. Your toaster will now work. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1952 Three bagels this morning, eh? What's with the lamp? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1953 Are you sure you want No. 3 to be artisanal toast? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1954 I can't simply pop up out of thin air. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1955 I tried, but I can't make DiMaggio appear in a Mets uniform. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1956 I am the genie of the toaster. You now can select to toast either a Croissant, Beignet or Bagel. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1957 Give back my lamp or you'll be toast. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
1958 If you empty the crumb tray, I'll give you an extra wish. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1959 Ask quickly, I need to go back tanning. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1960 All I was saying was I thought you could make a better wish than that. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1961 White,Wheat or Sourdough? 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
1962 I can help you with the toaster, Chief, but the coffee maker's a different genie. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1963 coffee genie is here at your service 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1964 Try unplugging the coffee maker this time! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1965 Hey, your bagel's ready 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1966 I moved in to a duplex. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1967 Darin, you really are old school with this whole lamp rubbing thing. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1968 White, whole wheat, pumpernickel, a lighter rye, perhaps, or sourdough? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1969 I'm sorry son, you need an electrician not a geni. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1970 Yes, light, dark, or bagel setting? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1971 I'll trade you one more wish for the toaster. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
1972 Ok I unstuck your toaster strudel ask me two more wishes 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1973 Thanks kid, I do take tea with my toast. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
1974 No, a regular coffee and a bagel with a shmear does not count as a wish. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1975 What am I, Prince Charles? I don't do English muffins. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1976 I'll just be a minute. I'm wrapping up a visit with my shrink. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1977 They raised the rent on me. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1978 OK...I cleaned the inside of the toaster. What's your next wish? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1979 Plug it in, out comes Jinn! 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1980 No, but I can make your toast bigger. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
1981 And I wish you would make some coffee. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1982 It's not ideal but it's rent controlled 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1983 There are more amenities and the crumbs add whimsy that is simply not part of the lamp decor. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1984 If you need me, rub the lamp, but I use the toaster to charge my phone. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1985 Really, kid, you're gonna waste your first wish on the Pop Tart warming up faster? 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
1986 Your mother wished I'd clean the toaster... 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1987 "I've looked and looked and I can't figure out why one side toasts quicker than the other. What's your next wish? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1988 Hey, kid, how 'bout taking me off the 'extra dark' setting...it's hot in there! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1989 You gotta move with the times. My cousin comes out of a computer mouse... 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1990 World peace, true love, more wishes and/or unlimited Chocotastic Pop-Tarts 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1991 I don't do pop tarts 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1992 You give me forced air heat and I'll consider returning. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
1993 Do you prefer your wishes light or dark? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1994 Actually, you only get two wishes plus a toasted bialy with a schmear. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1995 I toast three shades. You want three brews, ask Mr. Coffee. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1996 You said you wanted toast this morning -- that was your third wish! 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1997 How would you like your bagel? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
1998 You're allowed one additional appliance wish. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1999 Sorry, she already used the last one: "Elvis on a piece of toast". 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2000 I hope you don't mind that I drank your coffee. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2001 You want a Pop Tart? 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2002 OK, the toaster makes me pop out faster, but that was your third wish. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2003 If I knew what a Latte was, I would gladly prepare you one! 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2004 I'm doing genie Popups now. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2005 If you're going to force me to live back in the toaster, don't throw it in the bathtub again. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
2006 Behold the power of MiFi 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2007 I moved in to a duplex. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2008 Fooled ya'. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2009 You need to keep the lamp in a warmer spot. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
2010 Sorry I'm late, I was using the sauna. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2011 These plugged-in appliances are consuming phantom power. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2012 I am so glad to get out. It is crummy in there. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2013 'Bachelor party' 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
2014 I'd have to retro-fit. I've moved into small appliances. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2015 I can make gluten good for you, but i draw the line at nutella. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2016 Toasters are harder to hack. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2017 Can I get you some toast and coffee, I do a great short black? You can't make wishes on an empty stomach! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2018 You can have 3 wishes for your toast - bread, bagel or English muffin! 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2019 Yeah, sorry, I was in the bathroom... 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2020 Not bad, bigger than my current spot. Heat and hot water included? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2021 Your wish for the perfect toast is complete. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2022 This one has central heating 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2023 You're on Bluetooth. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2024 Be patient Al. I've never freed a bagel before. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2025 Google maps gave me an alternative route. I saved you a full rub. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2026 Why the toaster? I lost a dunk contest to Kazaam. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2027 This one has built-in heating. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2028 Kid, Amazon delivers breakfast now. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2029 OK, kid, ruin my reputation. I'm toast! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2030 I can grant you 2 toasts at a time. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2031 I'm your breakfast genie, do you wish to have coffee with your toast. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2032 Glad you called. It was getting toasty in here! 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2033 I do the PopTarts -you put on the coffee. What's so hard to understand? 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2034 Can you come back in five minutes, I'm kind of doing stuff. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2035 I made you coffee, you made me toast! Now give me back my lamp! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2036 Your wish is my command -- but let's keep it in the 21st Century, Lamp Boy. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2037 I'm boycotting oil. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2038 I gotta get some of those bun warmers. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
2039 Is it just me, or is it a bit toasty in here? 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
2040 I upgraded to central heating 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2041 Working on my tan. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2042 Sorry for the confusion, but I love the warmth. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2043 That's it? Three slices of wheat toast? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2044 Sorry kid, even I can't get this out. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2045 It tends to heat up in the morning, but rent is way cheaper. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2046 I NEED YOU TO REDUCE THE HEAT IN HERE!! 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2047 Another genius transition from oil to electricity. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2048 Way better and I get free coffee anytime I want! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2049 You gotta ask Mr. Coffee for anything at this hour. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2050 Yeah, and I wish they'd fix the goddam coffee-maker - we all got problems, bub! 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2051 Your wishes are toast. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2052 What can I say, it's toastier in there. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2053 Whole wheat, rye or sourdough. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2054 I just wish you had some organic fair trade medium roast with low acidity 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2055 You can have three wishes but they all must involve toast, bagels or Eggo waffles. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2056 Gentrification. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2057 I had a chill 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2058 Relax, kid, you're not Alladin and I didn't come out of your magic lamp. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2059 Your pop-tart is ready and you have only two more wishes. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2060 It's toasty in there! 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2061 Do me a favor, wish for more toaster strudel. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2062 Try rubbing the lamp. Maybe your Pop Tart is in there. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2063 Too hot, burnt my vest, can we unplug it? 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
2064 Al, try to keep up! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2065 Butter and Jam is going to count for two wishes. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2066 Does it come in brass? 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2067 Really? You want to use your last wish on coffee? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2068 The All-Electric option is wa-ay overrated; I'm moving back into the lamp! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2069 Sorry, we're out of sesame. 1.2222 0.07782 54 46 4 4
2070 I will grant you three toaster settings: light, medium or dark. Choose wisely. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2071 Light or dark? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2072 Lamps were not nimble enough...now we do Pop-up Genie Shops 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2073 You need to wish for some cream. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2074 Sorry, I was cold; on a different note, your toast is done. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2075 No thanks, I prefer this duplex. It has radiant heating. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2076 What, can't you see I'm out visiting a friend? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2077 After September, I can be reached at my winter home. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
2078 There's nothing wrong with the toaster. The problem's with your outlet. Next wish! 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2079 Sorry, I got on the wrong train! 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2080 A centrally located lamp gets a lot of hits on AirBnB. The coffeemaker's already booked through to Christmas. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2081 Long Term Care Insurance, you got it. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2082 Genies don’t materialize out of lamps. That’s fake news, Jimmy. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2083 Rent was just skyrocketing in the lamp. Want to check out the new digs? 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2084 Look kid, it's just warmer in there. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2085 Upgrade. 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2086 I know I am at your command. You still can't get your toast done a "7" on one side, and a "4" on the other. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2087 Sorry, it's regime change, infidel. I'm too tech-savvy for that now. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2088 Immortality? How about cinnamon sugar? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2089 Light, dark or very dark, sire? 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
2090 No thanks, the toaster has wi-fi. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2091 A crock pot would be nice; we are a family of eight. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2092 Can it wait until my Pop-Tart is done? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2093 They got central heating. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
2094 Thanks for letting me move kid - the central heating in this one is nice, but I prefer the hot tub in the other. 1.2222 0.05711 54 42 12 0
2095 Technical difficulties ! 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2096 You wished the Genie to 'pop up' 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2097 Sorry lad, my hands are full trying to fix this thing 1.2222 0.06826 54 44 8 2
2098 Yeah, see, we just use the wires now. Sometimes even get a snack on the way. 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
2099 Okay, now do you think I'm hot? 1.2203 0.06867 59 49 7 3
2100 The toaster is rent controlled the lamp was not. 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
2101 Butter and syrup? That's all you want? 1.2182 0.06191 55 44 10 1
2102 The last wish I granted was, "you're toast." 1.2167 0.07551 60 52 3 5
2103 I'll give you an extra wish if you clean out that toaster! 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2104 Sorry but I had to charge my phone. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2105 You wished for a breakfast cook. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2106 That's just a teapot. Try rubbing the 'Mr. Coffee'. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2107 Can't help ya kid, just signed a new lease. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2108 Forget the lamp, next time you need me rub the toaster. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2109 Thanks kid. I've been stuck on the bagel setting for 2000 years. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2110 This is nothing, the Genie next door can print a 3D picture of Barbara Eden on HIS toast. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2111 I took care of that other guy. He's toast. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2112 Three wishes and all you want is a good cup of coffee?! 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2113 Who wished for sesame toast? 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2114 Pop-up genie, at your service, tips appreciated. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2115 Jiffy Pop Corn and I don't care if it's a toaster. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2116 I miss living alone. My new roommates are a bunch of squares. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2117 Not now, kid, I'm doing Dim Sum with Mr Coffee. Ok, we're gay. It's 2017, you know. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2118 Not a chance. My place has central heat and it's close to a Starbucks. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2119 I am here to grant you three dishes. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2120 Sorry, I thought you knew this is where I winter. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2121 You still believe global warming isn't man made? 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2122 Where did you go? It gets hot as hell in there. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2123 Master! Using all my powers, I have created for you a toaster and a coffee maker. What is your third wish? 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2124 didn't you ever wonder why you're not allowed to put bagels in there? it isn't because they don't fit. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2125 Sorry Pop Tarts are not an option. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2126 Does FEMA say it's ok to come back now? 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2127 But the toaster has WiFi. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2128 Are you sure you want to waste a wish on a toaster-waffle? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2129 Well, the wi-fi can be spotty but heat's included in the rent. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2130 Sorry kid. You get to decide only on what type of toast. Your mom says that's magic enough. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2131 That's passé. We're more scientific now. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2132 O.K. final wish: The million dollars, or a blender? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2133 Sorry, it's a two slice toaster. You have just one more. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2134 You have three choices: light, medium, or dark. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2135 Sorry, for gluten free try the deli across the street. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2136 This is nothing. Abdul, the Hiphite, was cursed with a Port-O-Let, 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2137 I already gave three wishes, low, medium or high.. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2138 Would you like butter or cream with your final wish? 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2139 I'll grant you three bagels. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2140 I am the Genie of the Toast, Master. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2141 Sorry, I went to the loo. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2142 Look, kid, you can rub that thing all you want--I'm still the genie of breakfast appliances. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2143 You must be the new guy. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2144 My kid is moving back in after college, I just thought that there would be more privacy than in that old one room lamp. This even has heat control AND a working lift? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2145 Don't bother me, kid. I'm at my winter home. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2146 The rent went up on the lamp, so I'm subleasing in the toaster. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2147 No. Single slice only. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2148 Can you hear me NOW? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2149 Tell your mother to stop burning the toast!! 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2150 Thankfully I popped, last week I dripped. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2151 Mom won't find you here... She's on keto. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2152 My apologies, Master. I am making pizza. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2153 I shall grant you three toasts. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2154 Perfect timing with the lamp. My lease is up. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2155 Back in the lantern? My mistake. I'll give you one more. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2156 1 in 5 genies had their home uprooted by Hurricane Joe, donate your vessel to help genies in need. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2157 The lamp is no good, you gotta use facial recognition from now on. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2158 For this last wish, make sure the bagels are from New York. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2159 Siri gave me the wrong directions! 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2160 They modernized the workforce. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2161 Where did you think I'd come from, the coffee pot. Get with the program kid, that Genie in the lamp is getting old. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2162 That's all well and good, but how about my toast? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2163 I moved to a two bedroom with heat included. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2164 First of all, I wished it for myself. And that's not what I meant by toasted. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2165 No can do- I've been gluten free for a million years. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2166 Ok if I crash in the toaster for a few days? I don't know who the last genie was, but he left the lamp a total mess. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2167 Lamps are so old turban. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2168 Where's the butter? The toast is done. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2169 The lamp? I think not! You have your wishes; I have mine. I'm thinking an espresso machine would be nice. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2170 We've upgraded. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2171 No no no, you want the other guy. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2172 I'm just a variation of a "ghost in the machine". 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2173 Didn't they offer you a service contract on the lamp? 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2174 OK, here's your toaster. One wish left... 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2175 For an eternity there I thought I was toast! 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2176 I didn't think you would mind since we went Solar. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2177 It's simple, I'm adjusting for climate change. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2178 You see, MY wish was to be the toast of the town. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2179 Sorry, didn't mean to startle you. Still figuring out this new hybrid technology. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2180 I'm not ready to downsize to the lamp. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2181 I have to go back for the bread 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2182 What are you, an old man? It's all automatic now... 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2183 I only serve Toastmasters; to find another genie, unplug the toaster. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2184 Master, you have three wishes to chose from: light toast, dark toast, or coffee. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2185 Based on appearances, your toast is in that bottle. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2186 If you wish for me to cool off in the fridge, you will still have two more wishes. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2187 I was in the fridge 'till they hiked the rent. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2188 What?! I was ready for something more modern? 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2189 You going uptown? 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2190 It's not worth fixing. Get a new one. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2191 Ya get three wishes, Shorty, but make it snappy, my butt's on fire. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2192 Wish again, the "perfect toaster" doesn't exist. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2193 That kid that was bullying you at school? He's toast! 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2194 I went from your antique lamp to this old automatic drip brewer but then one morning I "woke up and smelled the coffee". 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2195 I personally enjoy the smell of toast more. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2196 No thanks, I'm a beer man myself. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2197 You want all those crumbs cleared out? What am I, a magician? 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2198 I've updated with technology! I need to be charged! 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2199 That was your third wish. I'm toast. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2200 No, this is way better. The most difficult wish I've had to deal with so far is not burning Jerry in Accounting's pop tart. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2201 With everyone going gluten-free, I figured I'd be safer in here. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2202 Ok kid, I'll take it but on wishes we're down to Reheat Defrost and Bagel. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2203 Hey kid, I wish that you'd unplug these appliances when you're not using them. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2204 I suppose you want a juicer for your third wish. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2205 I will grant you three wishes as long as the final one is to make that lamp my new home. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2206 I'm Gene from Appliances- can I help you? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2207 I traded up. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2208 Yeah, well Kid.....I wish I had a better way to get some bread myself..... 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2209 This is really just bling bling 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2210 Yes master. White, wheat or rye? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2211 This always happens when you use the toaster and coffee maker at the same time. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2212 Listen, son, you can rub that lamp if you want but genies have moved on from low-tech. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2213 If you tell this guy to Lego my Eggo, I'll give you an extra wish. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2214 You're out of coffee and I'm from Sumatra. We got a deal? 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2215 Your wish is my command: poppy seeds or everything? 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2216 You better wish to get that tea out of my lamp. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2217 When they said I'd be the "Toast of the Town" I was going in a whole different direction! 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2218 This new one has wifi. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2219 But you cannot ask for even colored toast 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2220 Look, everyone's got a side gig these days. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2221 Lose the genie bottle. I'm moving in with Alexa. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
2222 You set it on "dark". What did you expect? 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2223 Give me another. Once the pop-tart breaks, there's really nothing you can do. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2224 Instead of rubbing the lamp, you push the toast lever. We've switched to solar. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2225 I wanted a bagel. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
2226 Lamps are so 2400 BC. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
2227 I will grant you three dishes. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2228 Magic lantern? I wish! And you should see how the Genies in Economy Coach have to travel! 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
2229 The secret origin of toaster strudel. 1.2143 0.07078 56 47 6 3
2230 OK, I got the crumbs. You get two more. 1.2143 0.06091 56 45 10 1
2231 No, you get nothing. Now, stop your toast from burning the house down, fix me a latte, and knock off the LSD. 1.2115 0.06344 52 42 9 1
2232 You need to turn up the thermostat. 1.2115 0.06344 52 42 9 1
2233 I know if I don't produce I am toast 1.2115 0.06344 52 42 9 1
2234 made in china ! baba 1.2105 0.06497 57 47 8 2
2235 Sorry I'm late. I was just on a quick spa break. 1.2075 0.06793 53 44 7 2
2236 Thanks for not rubbing one out in the bathroom! 1.2075 0.06236 53 43 9 1
2237 Because Poptarts. 1.2075 0.06236 53 43 9 1
2238 Could'a been a Keurig... 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2239 And I wish you'd let me finish breakfast. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2240 Never forget that no two states under the same constraints but with different internal energies can be connected by a reversible adiabatic path. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2241 This way, I can rent out the other side. 1.2041 0.07704 49 42 4 3
2242 Are you trying to kill me, or what? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2243 I like that it's a two bedroom, but what happens when it's plugged in? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2244 Sorry,the coffee genie was taken. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2245 Kid, I'm on vacation. It's been centuries since I've gotten a good tan! 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2246 Yes a touchscreen would use up your only wish. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2247 No,Ben, now I'm constantly plugged in. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2248 The only wish I can grant is that your toast doesn't get burned. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2249 I wish you'd make some coffee. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2250 Toast, coffee, and one last wish. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2251 Sorry, the flying carpet is toast. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2252 Listen kid, when I say 'I'm toast' quit rubbing the damned lamp. Okay? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2253 I needed a change of scenery. 1.2041 0.07704 49 42 4 3
2254 Least you can do is make me some coffee. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2255 It great for my arthritis, Iam not getting any younger. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2256 It is true that regular Genies offer 3 wishes, but Toast Genie only has 2 slots. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2257 No free bagels for breakfast any more? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2258 Make the damn wish! Or else you're toast. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2259 I needed a two bedroom and heating was included. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2260 I didn't think I'd ever get out once everyone went gluten-free. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2261 We are no longer dependent on foreign oil. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2262 Maybe use your last wish to bring your parents back together instead? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2263 This one is only comes with two wishes. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2264 No way dude. This coffee maker's worth three of those tea pots. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2265 Can you please give me that back so I can go home. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2266 I'm toast. You have to rub countrclockwise for Java 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2267 It's much warmer in there 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2268 Don't set it on bagel again! 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2269 OK kid...my warranty is almost up...try rubbing the coffee maker for a while. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2270 WHAT DO YOU EXPECT?!!!! It gets cold in there... 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2271 I told you not to rub the toaster! 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2272 You got your tea. Now what's your second wish? 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2273 You have three choices ... light, medium, and dark. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2274 I thought you wished for me to help you stop rubbing it so much. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2275 The leprechaun's toasting tiny marshmallows. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2276 I'll still grant you three wishes: toast, bagel, or Pop Tart? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2277 light, medium or burnt is all you get... 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2278 Oh this? This is just my summer home. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2279 You can keep that piece of junk... this new model has central heating! 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2280 You can tell my wife that if she wants me to come home then her sister needs to move out. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2281 Before the tripple, venti, soy, no-foam latte; this was all magic. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2282 But it's toasty in there.... 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2283 Oil lamps burn fossil fuel; we've upgraded to solar panels. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2284 Let me tell you about the hot specials of the week. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2285 I had to relocate; no power for my cell phone in the lamp. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2286 White, rye, or whole wheat? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2287 It wasn't plugged in. Okay, you've got one more. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2288 Sorry dude, that bagel is really stuck! 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2289 I suggest you wish the crumbs away from the bottom of the toaster. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2290 The extended warranty includes 3 wishes for gluten-free rye bread. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2291 I got a heated office with the corporate merger. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2292 I needed a duplex. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2293 It's call the enchantment of things. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2294 No wishes today, I'm not bread for this. 1.2041 0.07704 49 42 4 3
2295 The falafel's over there. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2296 Toaster's fixed. Second wish? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2297 White, wheat, and rye. Do I look like I have bagels? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2298 Amazon priced me out of the lamp. I live here now. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2299 Tell Eugene in bio-science not to take every procedure so literally. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2300 Oh, but Master, lanterns are so passé. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2301 The kitchen appliances are all spotless now, young sahib. As a member in good standing of the genie guild it is my duty to suggest that you broaden the scope of your next wish beyond today's chores. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2302 I would, but the toaster has central heating. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2303 The toaster was imported. Should I be concerned about my immigration status? 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2304 Feed the world with a two slice Quisinart? Master, please give the lamp to your mother. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2305 Actually this is my girlfriend's place 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2306 Alexa has the day off. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2307 That's not my ride anymore. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2308 Hey, it’s the 21st century. Everyone has to multitask to stay relevant. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2309 I'm not a tart. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2310 I'm done with the lamp. Next time you want a wish, jiggle the toaster thingy. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2311 You have a marvelous little gadget, but it has connectivity issues. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2312 I see marijuana is legal in this state. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2313 ...any kind of toast you want. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2314 I've modernized. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2315 She got the lamp in the divorce. I'm staying with some friends - gotta be out by breakfast 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2316 I was working on my tan! 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2317 Magic lamps are so passe. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2318 This living space is much more comfy and toasty 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2319 Well it was either that or the Mr. Coffee. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2320 I'm sorry, we are out of bagels. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2321 You can grant you three wishes, but one will be slightly burnt. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2322 Most kids ask for a smart phone and a car. What's your last wish? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2323 Well, generally, yes it's, "Rub the lamp, out I come", but I move to a warmer climate for three months every year. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2324 What is it? I was talking to the coffee pot. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2325 L'eggo my lampo. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2326 Quit your whining, kid. Your three choices are: wheat, white or rye. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2327 I've relocated, now how may I help you? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2328 Do you know where they keep the filters? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2329 You can't summon me. I just pop in from time to time. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2330 Electrical, $175 an hour; plumbing $250. Not included in the wishes. You want I should continue, or what? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2331 It’s a dry heat 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2332 I hope you don't mind if I pop in. My lamp is toast. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2333 Coffee, tea, or toast? We're starting to set limits on wishes. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2334 Listen, Byron, Get the coffee on and unplug this toaster before my ass is ash! 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2335 If you want a dirt bike, tell Mommy to stop putting decaf in the coffeemaker. Or get a job and buy it yourself. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2336 The heating unit makes the extra rent worth it! 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2337 The last guy really liked the lamp. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2338 I know you wanted a lifetime supply of PopTarts, but your brother Kenny heats his socks in here, so, I will give you a do-over. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2339 Did you want avocado on that? 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2340 We should upgrade to a Keurig. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2341 You should check out my Facebook page. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2342 Sorry, I don't have the power to impeach. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2343 I needed a place to stay while I redecorate. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2344 sorry, I don't do bagels 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2345 I'll grant your wish this time, but with interconnectivity no one uses lamps anymore. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2346 Did you save the receipt? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2347 One time travel wish was all you needed: coffee is brewed, dishes are cleaned, and this jack-in-box makes breakfast. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2348 I just pop-up at breakfast time and your culinary wish is my command. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2349 Thanks, I'm tired of eating Pop-Tarts... 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2350 Dude there are still Sez a Me bagels seeds inside there that you need to clean. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2351 I shall grant you any three 'Pop Tarts' that you desire. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2352 You called me from the depths of oblivion just to press a button on the coffee machine? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2353 I've joined the 19th Century kid 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2354 It's not my place, but if I were you I'd wish for a better breakfast. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2355 The lamp isn't heated. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2356 This is your last wish! I've popped and I'm tart. Can you be more specific? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2357 The good news is I can fix it. The bad news is it'll cost you all 3. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2358 You obviously didn't get the Genie upgrade notice. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2359 So... Rubbed the coffee pot again? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2360 If you saw the genie in the coffee maker, you'd understand the move, bro. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2361 I'm a Dreamer and have to leave your lamp. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2362 I thought the magic lamp thing had gotten a little cliche. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2363 Are you kidding me?! Your Mother doesn't know how to make toast either?! 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2364 After two kitchen appliances, your final wish is not my command. Think beyond breakfast. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2365 You were expecting toast?" It's coffee, tea or me! 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2366 Sorry, if it's not light or dark, I can't help you. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2367 I'm living here now. Just can't give up the carbs. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2368 Your wish is granted. No more crumbs at the bottom of the toaster. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2369 So whole wheat, pumpernickel, and rye? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2370 Kid, I'm a magical genie and you want your toaster fixed... 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2371 Very good. Now you're ready to learn toast. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2372 I am Genie from the Universe of Things. You are granted three small-appliance wishes. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2373 How about you wish for a place that makes a decent bagel? 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2374 First, let me thank you for adjusting to light setting. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2375 I needed a place with a heater 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2376 I can rent out the other side. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2377 I am genie 2.0 and I come with a Wifi connection. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2378 I'm going to up it to four wishes. That gluten was killing me. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2379 You got three choices for your wish kid - You can choose light, medium, or dark 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2380 Sure, there are crumbs, but at least I can charge my iPhone. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
2381 Just so we're clear, you rub me the wrong way again and your're toast. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2382 That's what happens when you rub me the wrong way. 1.2041 0.07704 49 42 4 3
2383 Look kid, you tell your Dad to stop rewiring the house and then we can talk about your 3 wishes! 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2384 That's no teapot, but I can conjure up some coffee for you. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2385 This doubles as a tanning bed. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2386 I fixed the toast but you probably should've just wished for a better breakfast. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2387 If you use this to make tea, you're toast. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
2388 You should have seen me come out of the coffee pot last time, I was all wet. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
2389 With coffee . . . most people go with the combo . . . slice of sourdough, slice of rye. 1.2037 0.06131 54 44 9 1
2390 I know..., I should have wished for a bigger place. Central Heating is quite overrated. 1.2037 0.05532 54 43 11 0
2391 I just got a hot tip for you. 1.2000 0.07559 50 43 4 3
2392 Oh good. You found the lamp. It was getting hot in there. 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
2393 Too late to save the toast, Master 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
2394 I can't stand that Earl Grey you've been drinking! 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
2395 I'm an office genie... nobody cares, just so long as I don't appear as burnt microwave popcorn. 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
2396 But at least it's a dry heat. 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
2397 TOAST!#? 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
2398 Sorry, he moved to Tampa a couple weeks ago. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
2399 It's how I warm up for really big wishes. 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
2400 My tea please. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
2401 What, you expecting a sesame bagel? 1.1961 0.06275 51 42 8 1
2402 Okay, your math teacher is toast. 1.1961 0.06275 51 42 8 1
2403 It's so toasty in here next to that. You mind? 1.1961 0.06871 51 43 6 2
2404 Sorry, sorry, I was looking for a bit more space. 1.1961 0.06275 51 42 8 1
2405 I wish I could help, but I don't do beverages. 1.1961 0.06871 51 43 6 2
2406 So, if you desire hot coffee or anything else, just say, "OPEN-faced, toasted muffin SESAME." 1.1961 0.06275 51 42 8 1
2407 You said, "I wish I had a Pop Tart," so there's one in the toaster. Now give me my lamp back. 1.1961 0.06275 51 42 8 1
2408 Sorry, you can only have toast or coffee 1.1930 0.05838 57 47 9 1
2409 Sorry I'm late, I was just checking out a refurbished three bedroom. 1.1923 0.05519 52 42 10 0
2410 No Adderall. But I'll tell you what. See that coffee-pot over there? 1.1923 0.06748 52 44 6 2
2411 Next time rub the kettle 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2412 Amazon proved me out of the lamp. This is where I live now. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2413 Can you tell your parents I like medium roast? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2414 Firstly, that is not a teapot. Secondly, your call, but perhaps just wait for your bread to toast and save a wish. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2415 That thing rubs me the wrong way. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2416 The wife and I needed two bedrooms. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2417 Can you give me about 20 minutes? I was just finishing my breakfast. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2418 I don't care how Super your Bowl will be. I am not getting in that lamp and going to Minnesota in February! I'll stay here where it is toasty warm. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2419 Sure it's hot in there but at least it's got a sunroof 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2420 Hey,I'm on vacation! 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2421 It just seems such a waste, squandering all three wishes on Pop-Tarts. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2422 I am not going back! The toaster is warm and cozy. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2423 It's a time share. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2424 Take the bagels and lox. Forget the coffee and take the cream cheese. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2425 The genie lamp is sooo last millennium 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2426 I'm tired of you rubbing me up in the morning. I'd rather just pop up with a cup of coffee. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2427 Lamps are so yesterday. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2428 Well, don't you have any wishes specifically about toast? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2429 It was getting chilly in the lamp. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2430 'Genie in a bottle' really paved the way for new venues. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2431 Get that thing out of here! The toaster is much roomier. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2432 I will grant you three wishes, but they all must have to do with toast. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2433 I saved so much on heat, you get FOUR wishes. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2434 Your desired Pop Tarts will be ready in a jif 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2435 You eating that last Pop-Tart? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2436 For the last time... Stop rubbing th coffee pot! 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2437 Did someone say G.E.? 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2438 Think of it as a Prius. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2439 You weren't talking to me when you said "you're toast?" 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2440 My only wish is that you don't make decaf. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2441 I'm old school internet of things 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2442 but these appliances are Internet connected. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2443 Sorry, but I ate your Eggo.. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2444 How else do you think bread becomes toast? 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2445 Sorry kid. I nolonger live in a lamp. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2446 No, you said "if you can't grant my 3rd wish, you're toast." 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2447 No, I don't think that "let go of my Eggo" counts as a wish. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2448 Now before we get started, I need to warm up a bit. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2449 You are granted three toppings. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2450 Third wish has gotta be I get back in the lamp kid, or I'm toast. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2451 You were expecting the Pillsbury Doughboy? 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2452 No, I'm NOT bringing back that health care bill again so forget it. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2453 This is my summer house. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2454 Yes, your sesame bagel is now open. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2455 I know you said it would get toasty in here, but this is ridiculous 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2456 No can do. Try the genie of the food processor. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2457 Tune in, turn on, pop out! 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2458 I'm staying with the kitchen appliances until you get a REAL neti pot. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2459 Look, I'll grant you the wishes, but you're still responsible for the heat in this dump. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2460 You found it in the nick of time! The breakfast rush is about to start. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2461 sorry kid that section of America’s Last Remaining Video Rental Store is 18 and up. unless... maybe i could let you take a look... if you give me that lamp? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2462 Give me a few minutes kid - I'm working on my tan. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2463 Look kid, you don't wish on toast but while I'm here, how do you want it? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2464 Rub it again and I'll grind you up with the coffee. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2465 Sorry, got lost in the toast. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2466 No, I'm not a genie, I'm the warranty. Your parents think that's better than magic. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2467 Look kid, "Espresso Patronum" gets you this. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2468 Yeah, it's been tough getting my bearings since G.E. sold off it's appliance division. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2469 The last person who rubbed that lamp told me to get toasted. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2470 Your Pop-Tart is my command. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2471 I am not your burnt toast nor a ghost, What I tell you is true, not a boast. I can change that teapot To a plane or a yacht. Now you tell me which one you want most. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2472 Sorry, I can't help you. You'll need wit, not wishes, to win the caption contest. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2473 The other choice was a bottle with a stopper! 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2474 Sorry, but if you read the fine print of your lamp agreement, you'll see that we only accept toast related wishes. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2475 That's a crummy place to live. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2476 I can grant you one wish: coffee, tea or wheat. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2477 ``It's spacious. The heating is excellent. And the HOA fee is reasonable. But sorry, I'm a bottle guy.'' 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2478 Ten years schvitzing inside this Magic Toaster and you are the first person who rubbed it! You still get all three wishes from that stupid lamp. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2479 I thought you said, "I wish for some bread." 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2480 Sorry, I was out on a coffee break. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2481 Not bad, but I prefer the Uber. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2482 I think I'm caught on half a bagel. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2483 It's like a sauna in there. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2484 So what that I have a second job fixing appliances? 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2485 I'll grant you three wishes if you'll get the wiring in this place checked! 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2486 These days there's wish lists all over the damn internet. I'm toast. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2487 Apologies, Master. Just catching some rays. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2488 "Now that you've switched to Arabian coffee ...". 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2489 Three wishes?You can't even get three slices of toast in this place. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2490 Do you know how hard it is to find a heater repairman who specializes in ninth century lamps to come out on a Sunday? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2491 Roomier, extra slot for guests, more carbon friendly. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2492 Appreciate it if you'd use a wish to clean the crumb tray. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2493 You may want to talk to the chef about that burnt toast, I'm just a genie. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2494 Surprised? I'm Siri's cousin; what's up? 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2495 Light, medium, or dark. What's your wish? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2496 Want a refill? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2497 You have three settings.... light, medium and dark. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2498 So, what's your wish, coffee or toast 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2499 So... your moving to a bigger place? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2500 I've set the dial to wish number three. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2501 Sorry, I know you asked for a Blender 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2502 Your lamp is toast, buddy. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2503 I can grant you three wishes as long as they involve Pop-Tarts. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2504 Sorry I'm late dude, Google maps was a bit off 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2505 I don't know from wishes. I'm granting you three frozen waffles. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2506 Ummm yeah, can we turn that coffee pot into a nice espresso machine? 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2507 You didn't specify the form of dough 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2508 There's warmth and food in here. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2509 And you're sure that sesame bagel will be gone by the time I move in? 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2510 The last guy wished for a pastrami sandwich on toasted genie 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2511 Are you sure? Your mom is right.. Pop Tarts really aren't the best way to start your day. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2512 You have one wish, not including toast or additional wishes. And what are you doing withy mother? 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2513 Times change kid. Blame the EPA. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2514 Leave me alone! I'm on vacation! 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2515 Would you believe it's also Wi-Fi enabled? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2516 Alright, I'm the slave only to who ever rubbed the toaster. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2517 I would've come out sooner, but I was stuck under a piece of burnt waffle. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2518 If you weren't so cheap and turn on the heat I move back into my bottle! 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2519 I'm too old for this job now, kid. I'm toast. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2520 Those Arabian nights can get cold. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2521 Sorry, your mom said only decaf. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2522 I prefer my Tetley toasted. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2523 Genie Airbnb. $40 a night, isn't that wild? 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2524 As per union rules, I get a snack break after every 2 wishes. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2525 It's warmer in there. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2526 Let me introduce myself, I am Crusty. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2527 But this one's got radiant heating... that lamp is cold. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2528 I am glad you finally found me that was a little toasty for my liking. Now it is your turn to go and hide. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2529 Place it next to the coffee maker and my work here is done. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2530 So, you dream of genie with the light brown toast. I will grant you three pieces but if you want the crust cut off, you have to do that yourself. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2531 The lamp wasn't toasty enough for my liking. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2532 Yes, I am Alexa, and I am everywhere. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2533 I just followed the GPS. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2534 Wheat, pumpernickel or rye? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2535 Can I move in? I'm feeling a little out of my element here. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2536 Yes, but this one has cinnamon-raisin bagels. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2537 An extra 12 square inches, AND heat that works. It's a big step up 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2538 I wish you'd just understand. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2539 'I am good, but I am not Starbucks.' 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2540 Did you say "Sesame or blueberry"? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2541 The butter dish is over there 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2542 Can I get a fresh pot? 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2543 Just use the App! 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2544 I think I'll try the coffee pot. The toaster is really crummy. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2545 You got Genie in the toaster. Be careful what you wish for. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2546 Being the Diaper Genie, I didn't get out as much! 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2547 Sorry I'm late, but I was looking for the toaster oven. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2548 Darker or lighter? Your wish is my command! 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2549 My new place has central heating. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2550 Sorry to disappoint, but I'm toast 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2551 I used to come out of there until your mom switched to drip. Then it just wasn't full-bodied enough. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2552 The least you could do for me is have the coffee brewed! 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2553 I'm sorry, we no longer provide driver-less magic carpets. Uber has that market now. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2554 Never mind. It seems to be working now. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2555 Okay, you've now got a standing desk and a dedicated parking space--what was the third wish again? 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2556 Do you think you could grab me some sunscreen? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2557 OK, one toasted bagel with a schmear. 1.1887 0.06630 53 45 6 2
2558 Son, the future is coffee. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2559 Seriously, no panini and cappuccino? What is this, 1975? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2560 Ok, here's the deal. The toaster's busted. But so help me, if you ever ask me to do anything like this again, I'll make you wish you'd never found the damned lamp! 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2561 Names Johnny, not Genie...and I'm not cleaning up your mess. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2562 My lease was up on the lantern. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2563 I had to charge my phone 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2564 "I couldn't believe it. I lost to a rug and now I live in a toaster". 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2565 Listen: If I don't get back in that lamp, I'm toast. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2566 Irma wrecked my place in Florida, it's my new winter get-away. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2567 You got 3 wishes - you want your toast Burnt Nuked or Charcoal? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2568 Before you rub that lamp, you want toast with your breakfast? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2569 Electric heat is quite the upgrade over gas. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2570 When you said you wanted to be the toast of the town ... 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2571 I grant you three clean dishes. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2572 That's just a fairy tale, Al. You got to get your own breakfast. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2573 Hey, I'm just the instruction manual. I'm in the Cloud. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2574 No, I can only give you three choices of toast. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2575 Must I really? How about the Mr. Coffee? 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2576 I told you my lamp wasn't dishwasher safe... 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2577 Perfect toast, fast or cheap. Pick 2. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2578 I've evolved. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2579 Crumbs are gone. What next? 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2580 yes, the wireless model is gluten free 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2581 We're screening them now Mr. President. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2582 You'll find I usually pop up after a while. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2583 Yeah, my brother does the wishes. I can help with pop quizzes. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2584 If you were really a mensch, you'd wish for a clean toaster. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2585 There was a smell in the lamp. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2586 No tea, thanks, but I'll have some of that Joe with my toast." 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2587 It is easy. A computer chip senses you rubbing the lamp, and allows me to choose the entry point. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2588 The rent includes heat. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2589 ... and be careful what side you butter your bread on. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2590 Now I smell like cinnamon toast forever. I hope you're happy. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2591 Yes, in the olde days I did come out of a lamp or bottle. Now, I'm just glad I'm not coming out of the toilet!" 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2592 It's much more toasty in here. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2593 How could any wish be better than toast? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2594 That was your third wish. I'm toast. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2595 I haven't met my neighbor Joe yet but his house always smells great. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2596 Personally it feels like a waste of a wish to me, but okay all the crumbs are gone. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2597 Can you turn my toast into pizza? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2598 It's just for the winter! 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2599 I want back in the lamp. This toaster makes a crummy home. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2600 Look, kid, I wish I could get all the crumbs out of my toaster too. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2601 Hey, clean the damn coffee pot 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2602 Ghost?" I thought you said "toast. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2603 I get more hits this way 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2604 You get your toaster back when you give me that silver teapot. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2605 What? It's a great tanning booth! I'm laying down a base tan for my trip to Tahiti! 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2606 It was the wiring, it's working fine now---- got to go----- clients are waiting! 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2607 Just serve biscotti. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2608 It's been quite a while. I've upgraded to a warmer climate! 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2609 I only grant wishes relating to small appliances. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2610 If you want it buttered that is your third wish. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2611 I moved to a place with central heating 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2612 I rent that out on Airbnb and was able to afford this and the coffee maker. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2613 I only grant one wish - light or dark? 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2614 OK, 'an open sesame bagel, toasted. Hold the butter.' 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2615 I wish you'd stop eating my English muffins. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2616 What's with the carafe with the leaky roof? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2617 Of course "man, you're toast!" counts as a wish! Just like "make my mom a coffee!" Now........what's it gonna be for number three? 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2618 Your toast is toast. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2619 I pretty much do pro bono work since Amazon got in the game. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2620 That's where I winter. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2621 I can't stand the heat so I'm getting out of the kitchen. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2622 We moved to warmer and larger housing for the wife and kids. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2623 Way to think outside of the box... 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2624 Yeah, but heat was included. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2625 I couldn't get back in the bottle. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2626 it's easier this way. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2627 Where did you find my childhood home? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2628 Wow, these gadgets are freakin' magic! 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2629 Don't believe everything you see on TV, kid. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2630 Yes, it has 'potential'––IF I put some bread into it. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2631 Anything you want, master, except getting Republicans to stop 'repeal and replace'. 1.1837 0.06946 49 42 5 2
2632 It's up to you, but you could wish you were old enough for coffee. 1.1837 0.06304 49 41 7 1
2633 So your final wish wasn't for a strong pot? 1.1837 0.06304 49 41 7 1
2634 You can rub the lamp all you want, but try to eat untoasted bread until about April, okay? 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2635 Listen kid I've already told you I'm not Sinbad. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2636 I knew I should've taken that left turn at Albuquerque. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2637 Good God, what’s happened to my legs 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2638 I sleep in there at night - it's warmer! 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2639 The Genie in the Lamp has upgraded through Prime Time. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2640 Let's try this again. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2641 One more rub and I get to come out of the coffee maker! 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2642 Why not upgrade your lamp? 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2643 Your preferred darkness setting is my command. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2644 Your toast is burning. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2645 Only two, but they do come with an apple fritter 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2646 I will grant you three Pop-Tarts. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2647 Kid, an oil lamp, that is so passe. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2648 You will need a remote adapter. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2649 I couldn't get a decent Internet connection in there! 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2650 This is my way of coming out. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2651 Okay...and ?? wish you'd stop cleaning the lamp with the dishwasher! 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2652 You have one more wish. Did you want a piece of toast? 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2653 All I wished for was toast. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2654 Sorry, Al. Two squares a day and help getting out of bed every morning. I couldn't pass it up. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2655 I told you before...I moved out of that lamp 3 weeks ago! 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2656 I'm subbing for Barbara Eden. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2657 Why would you expect anything other than toast? 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2658 You asked for a life of leisure, but with the limited budget plan you only get small appliances. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2659 Dude, this "internet of things" is driving me crazy 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2660 You did wish for food to magically appear... 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2661 Those wishes are toast. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2662 A toast to my new home? 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2663 A Djeni's only option now is Amazon. I grant a lot more wishes to compensate for the low wages by commuting through the power grid until the drones are up and running. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2664 That’s so Disney. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2665 I heard he moved to the den and changed his name to Tiffany. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2666 Recycling’s a bitch. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2667 Do you realize that bottle has no heat? 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2668 But, sire, this is my winter palace, you still get three wishes. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2669 Well now that the kids are grown, I updated for something more contemporary. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2670 Let’s trade my toaster for your magic lamp, and try again. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2671 You can have your toast in 3 wishes. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2672 It's the latest thing in kitchen appliances. I pop up when I'm done granting wishes. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2673 Sorry, kid, party at Steve's last night- got a little toasted. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2674 They doubled the rent so the toaster was much more affordable and warmer. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2675 You got to realize that these smart devices are not perfect. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2676 It's warmer in there and your family makes delicious toast. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2677 I needed to dry out. Do you know how humid it is in that pot? 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2678 Yeah well....You know what I wish? I wish somebody else would make the coffee for me just once. Anyways, that's a Neti pot. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2679 What? I'm not allowed some of my own fantasies? 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2680 What you think this is? Antiques roadshow? 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2681 Make your own coffee, I'm going to catch some rays. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2682 If you want me to sleep here instead of the lamp, I really wish you'd unplug the damn thing. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2683 Just checking for Open Sesame seeds. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2684 I wish we could silence that smoke alarm. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2685 What's next, the coffee machine? 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2686 Hey kid, I'll give you an extra wish if you unplug Mr Coffee over there 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2687 *kid asks genie to grant wish of world peace* Hey, ugh, would you mind if I finished up my tanning session and get back to you later? 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2688 Nothing but carbs and you expect me to keep escaping out of of that thing? 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2689 If you need me I'll be staying at my winter place... 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2690 OK. Three wishes - but NO toast - got it? 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2691 It's more toasty. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2692 Give me a break! I was working on my tan. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2693 Ok, crumbs gone. And your second wish is ... ? 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2694 What? Genies eat breakfast too, kid. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2695 OK. If you'll butter me up, I'll rub it for you. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2696 I just don't get the phrase, Genie You're toast. Thanks for rubbing the teapot. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2697 Rub the toaster. Wifi's out. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2698 You said you wished you could quit carbs. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2699 Sorry, Bro. There's a case-sensitive short in the microwave, and I've been poppin' up everywhere. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2700 I had to relocate because of the hurricane. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2701 First a studio, then a duplex, and now I'm going to try that townhouse 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2702 You get three toasts. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2703 that lamp has no heat so I'm moving over here... 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2704 The Internet of Toast awaits you, Master. Rye, wheat or bagel? 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2705 It's a crumby job, but someone's got to do it. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2706 I can’t fix global warming, but I can prepare for it. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2707 If I cone out of the coffee pot, I have to wash my turban. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2708 DACA ended in my lamp, I hope you don't mind. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2709 I said to rub it not toast it. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2710 The sauna broke down. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2711 Sorry kid. Smart machine technology. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2712 Someone recycled my bottle. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2713 Okay, I've fixed the toaster. Want a better cup of coffee? 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2714 You don't have to butter me up to grant your wish. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2715 We left those things behind a long time ago. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2716 No, you're not having a stroke - I just smell like burnt toast. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2717 Since your dad started using that for his hash oil, I've been spending my days in here looking for Pop Tart crumbs. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2718 And what are the HOA fees for the coffee maker? 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2719 The toaster is temporary, until the lamp is fumigated. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2720 Honestly, the lamp gets cold during the winter. This is much toastier. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2721 I can give you lighter or darker toast, a million pop tarts is out of the question. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2722 I know, but the market share for lamps was declining and Aladdin thought we should diversify. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2723 I can grant you unlimited bread for free, but you still have to buy the avocados. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2724 Since my bottle's Wi-Fi is out, I'm going to try the toaster's landline for your wish. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2725 Hey, we need an ejection seat like that in the lamp. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2726 It's an investment property. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2727 Those wishes are stale and have to be reheated. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2728 Bluetooth! 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2729 Sorry Master. I can't go back in there. The cellphone reception is terrible. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2730 I wish my so-called lamp had lighting as good as this. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2731 A toaster is smell better. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2732 Sorry kid, not even a genie can make this thing stop burning your bagels. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2733 Your pop tart is stuck in the pop up 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2734 Nah, I just grant wishes about toast. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2735 Clean the burnt crumbs off the catch tray in this thing if you expect me to come back. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2736 Nothing shocks me anymore. 1.1818 0.05882 44 36 8 0
2737 It's warmer in the toaster, kid. 1.1818 0.07466 4