Contest #575


Cartoon

575


Name Value
Submission deadline -
Voting started 2017-07-03
Voting ended -
Finalists announced -
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued 2017-07-16 (estimated)
Number of captions 5059
Number of responses 593171
Number of participants 23833


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Let's pick up the pace. They're billing by the hour. 2.1645 0.00841 8330 1879 3202 3249
1 Apparently they're experts in hostile takeovers. 2.1298 0.01161 4100 902 1764 1434
2 We sue at dawn. 2.1245 0.00848 8955 2398 3044 3513
3 This time they'll know we mean business. 2.1147 0.01173 4281 1043 1704 1534
4 Well, on the other hand, there is no fee unless we win. 2.0705 0.01161 4157 1028 1808 1321
5 Pillaging lasts a day, these guys will screw them for years! 2.0610 0.03084 688 205 236 247
6 We may have lost the battle, but we'll win the appeal. 2.0352 0.00879 7535 2065 3140 2330
7 The field will soon be littered with habeas corpuses. 2.0346 0.00884 8215 2498 2935 2782
8 ...so I told the genie I wanted a hoard of the most ruthless and feared men from throughout history... 2.0286 0.01698 2130 624 821 685
9 You just had to say "Run it by the lawyers", didn't you? 2.0062 0.01176 4211 1214 1757 1240
10 You better be right about the pen being mightier than the sword. 2.0032 0.00930 7185 2220 2722 2243
11 So, it's a legal battle they want? 1.9811 0.01189 4084 1218 1725 1141
12 Hostile takeovers ain’t what they used to be. 1.9679 0.00852 9148 3190 3062 2896
13 The streets will run red with tape 1.9594 0.00988 6622 2282 2327 2013
14 You realize we're only gonna get a third of the plunder... 1.9503 0.00985 6033 1922 2489 1622
15 I liked it better when we settled disputes out of court. 1.9228 0.01217 3784 1217 1642 925
16 Don't worry, these guys know how to charge. 1.9191 0.00998 6121 2133 2350 1638
17 You think it's overkill, because you've never been through a divorce. 1.9140 0.01004 6271 2273 2264 1734
18 Explain to me again this idea of pillageable hours. 1.9016 0.01370 3242 1161 1239 842
19 Trust me, nothing crushes the enemy's spirit like long-term financial planning. 1.8940 0.01272 3812 1399 1418 995
20 That's the last time I let you occupy Wall Street 1.8856 0.01320 3574 1341 1301 932
21 I hate legal battles. 1.8763 0.01021 6121 2376 2126 1619
22 First we'll hit the castle with code violations. 1.8612 0.01144 4481 1668 1767 1046
23 Nobody ever expects the Spanish Deposition. 1.8235 0.01589 2567 1098 824 645
24 I said, 'Suits of armor,' not 'Armani suits.' 1.8201 0.01397 3257 1381 1081 795
25 Now that we've captured these lawyers, let's threaten to release one every hour until our ransom demands are met. 1.8179 0.01297 3948 1735 1197 1016
26 I call it "shock and audit." 1.8059 0.01534 2576 1079 918 579
27 This time we mean business. 1.7933 0.01067 5124 2133 1917 1074
28 Instead of sacking their castle, we'll offer a reverse mortgage. 1.7896 0.01436 2885 1225 1042 618
29 You're the one who wanted to negotiate. 1.7871 0.01099 4561 1844 1844 873
30 It's not war that's hell, it's the paperwork. 1.7852 0.01127 4423 1819 1735 869
31 I wanted “a counting of our troops.” Not “accountants for our troops!” 1.7823 0.02024 1470 637 516 317
32 There is no way she is getting the beach house. 1.7762 0.01514 2721 1221 888 612
33 For once corporate seems to have our backs. 1.7701 0.01230 3536 1446 1457 633
34 I texted headquarters to send us 10,000 new “insurgents.” Their spellchecker changed it to “insurance agents.” 1.7668 0.01283 4099 1973 1109 1017
35 I'm beginning to think we should have settled out of court. 1.7666 0.01197 3908 1656 1508 744
36 Who said anything about invasion? I'm preparing for evasion. 1.7621 0.02689 803 351 292 160
37 The ad said they specialize in assault and battery. 1.7577 0.01579 2332 1029 839 464
38 There's an ambulance up ahead. Maybe we can lose them there. 1.7548 0.01478 2941 1393 876 672
39 First we rape and pillage then we audit the hell out if them 1.7522 0.02115 1380 639 444 297
40 Trust me, nobody plunders like these guys. 1.7427 0.01703 1978 887 713 378
41 remember when we used to conquer without having to run it through legal? 1.7342 0.01489 2603 1189 917 497
42 I should have read the Magna Carta before I signed it. 1.7333 0.01866 1672 769 580 323
43 Obviously we have two very different interpretations of "hostile takeover" 1.7202 0.02338 972 432 380 160
44 They shall learn to fear the name of Zorrak the Litigious ! 1.7172 0.03028 647 309 212 126
45 'So sue me,' he says. 1.7163 0.01518 2552 1215 846 491
46 I'm already regretting this merger 1.7069 0.01233 3613 1677 1318 618
47 We may lose this battle, but we'll have them tied up in court for years. 1.7057 0.01379 2691 1201 1081 409
48 I guess he wasn't kidding. He does have an army of lawyers. 1.7032 0.01342 3063 1434 1104 525
49 They're docile now, but just wait until they lose cell reception. 1.6982 0.01529 2508 1228 809 471
50 Their résumés all said 'headhunter' 1.6980 0.01551 2447 1201 784 462
51 Remember, we're not here to negotiate. 1.6711 0.01830 1490 697 586 207
52 The pen had damn well BETTER be mightier than the sword! 1.6694 0.01427 2792 1408 899 485
53 I told you to order armored suits, not Armani suits! 1.6652 0.01518 2581 1344 757 480
54 Let's see if he refuses to release his tax returns now. 1.6625 0.02448 1037 556 275 206
55 I brought sticks and stones just in case. 1.6542 0.02260 1099 564 351 184
56 Let's gallop, just for fun. 1.6542 0.01983 1524 811 429 284
57 We'll attack when the defense rests. 1.6507 0.01762 1772 905 581 286
58 My lawyer? Lemming & Lemming....why do you ask? 1.6462 0.02013 1371 709 438 224
59 These corporate raids just don't have the same vibe. 1.6430 0.02089 1182 591 422 169
60 Hostile takeovers ain’t what they used to be. 1.6390 0.01639 2449 1407 519 523
61 I will never surrender my tax returns. 1.6375 0.03192 538 280 173 85
62 I'm not losing a battle on a technicality ever again. 1.6370 0.01738 1730 880 598 252
63 I don't care if Barney's had a sale. Next time I'll pick the uniforms myself. 1.6367 0.02236 1145 611 339 195
64 I realize it seems cruel. But the King's subjects must be made to understand that The Black Death is in fact a disqualifying pre-existing condition under the terms of the policy. 1.6329 0.02655 760 394 251 115
65 I miss the old days when everything wasn't litigated to death. 1.6283 0.01948 1345 686 473 186
66 Well, at least we'll know whether the pen really is mightier than the sword. 1.6234 0.02743 693 360 234 99
67 In a few miles, we should water the horses and cocktail the lawyers. 1.6232 0.02167 1096 566 377 153
68 Just explain it to me one more time....the difference between an Inquisition and an audit is what again? 1.6156 0.01603 2120 1141 653 326
69 Do they know that CHARGE is an order and not a transaction? 1.6136 0.02146 1087 563 381 143
70 Now that we've drained the swamp, what are we supposed to do with them? 1.6112 0.02188 1209 676 327 206
71 Wait'll they find out the king never pays his lawyers. 1.5996 0.02245 1039 563 329 147
72 How much further is the cliff? 1.5966 0.02129 1242 701 341 200
73 I kept telling you to claim all your looting as income. 1.5958 0.01829 1425 744 513 168
74 Sometimes you have to go to war with the army you have not the army you want. 1.5957 0.02272 1024 561 316 147
75 I used to love being a barbarian. Now I just feel dirty. 1.5956 0.02262 1098 620 302 176
76 I'm expecting a legal battle 1.5883 0.01688 1778 967 576 235
77 If any dare to resist us, their streets will run red with tape. 1.5849 0.03837 371 210 105 56
78 Wars kill. Litigation destroys!!! 1.5824 0.02809 649 358 204 87
79 I take it this is a civil war. 1.5787 0.02093 1175 654 362 159
80 I have my doubts about these new Homeland Security hires. 1.5769 0.01905 1919 1246 239 434
81 Well, at least we'll now see if the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.5751 0.02312 899 488 305 106
82 I remember when the legal department was just Hrothgar, the rack, and a thumbscrew. 1.5728 0.02240 1058 603 304 151
83 So you're sure he said game of torts? 1.5706 0.04097 326 189 88 49
84 Attacking our enemies with an army of lawyers seems needlessly cruel. 1.5672 0.01919 1377 776 421 180
85 Sorry, but I still see a difference between raping and pillaging and just screwing people out of health insurance. 1.5655 0.02721 771 460 186 125
86 Let's quicken the pace, they're billing by tenths of an hour. 1.5586 0.01923 1373 785 409 179
87 They call me Erik The Litigious. 1.5585 0.02056 1162 655 365 142
88 We're adventure capitalists. 1.5577 0.02873 615 352 183 80
89 I miss the old days, when we could pillage without worrying about the legal consequences. 1.5548 0.01979 1260 716 389 155
90 We'll either defeat them in battle or a legion of lawyers will be killed. It's win-win. 1.5524 0.02342 992 591 254 147
91 Yes, but if we win, they have to pay our fees. 1.5507 0.01916 1311 742 416 153
92 So your idea is to bore them to death? 1.5482 0.02849 633 370 179 84
93 Not the 'hostile takeover' I'm used to leading. 1.5416 0.01983 1237 714 376 147
94 Because you're younger with only one hat-point. 1.5390 0.02187 1256 800 235 221
95 You think the paper trail will give us away? 1.5389 0.02866 566 322 183 61
96 As it turns out, castrations, scalps and gold teeth all qualify as gross income. 1.5366 0.02328 1092 693 212 187
97 ambulant chasers ! 1.5366 0.02185 1215 764 250 201
98 . . . and then we turn the lawyers loose, so the real pillaging can begin. 1.5350 0.03218 471 275 140 56
99 So, how did you get into mergers and acquisitions? 1.5337 0.02114 1025 585 333 107
100 I don't really mind the battles; It's the regulatory compliance that's a drag. 1.5330 0.02181 1030 605 301 124
101 They are conditioned to following horse's asses. 1.5270 0.02633 814 513 173 128
102 We need to stop soon. The horses need water and the lawyers may need to adjust their briefs. 1.5216 0.02340 926 562 245 119
103 I know winter is coming, but so is April 15th. 1.5205 0.02500 682 387 235 60
104 Onward to the (com)promised land !!! 1.5184 0.02428 1003 654 178 171
105 Do you think we're leaving an audit trail? 1.5182 0.02525 743 441 219 83
106 This time, there will be no doubt that we mean business! 1.5147 0.03107 511 310 139 62
107 Four centuries of plunder, and now they ask for receipts. 1.5140 0.02668 714 439 183 92
108 Remember when the rules of engagement were simpler? 1.5137 0.03015 512 304 153 55
109 Attila wanted the cruelest mercenaries, I'm bringing him Congress! 1.5113 0.02722 708 443 168 97
110 We're off to sue the wizard. 1.5111 0.03183 495 304 129 62
111 Frankly, this idea seems even worse than the "Send in the Clowns" offensive. 1.5106 0.02880 613 379 155 79
112 We came, we saw, we audited. 1.5082 0.02328 858 514 252 92
113 Well, you did ask for a band of cutthroats. 1.5078 0.02399 829 502 233 94
114 I came, I sued, I conquered. 1.5057 0.02497 791 487 208 96
115 Having an acquisition army is more profitable, but I do miss hands-on plundering. 1.5036 0.03259 417 247 130 40
116 We Came, We Sued, We Conquered. 1.5030 0.02730 664 411 172 81
117 I'm telling you, Bob, he said "pursue the enemy," not "sue the enemy." 1.5026 0.02545 774 482 195 97
118 I say we put 'em all in a giant horse and leave it outside the city gate. 1.5014 0.02642 702 434 184 84
119 If you can't beat them, audit them. 1.4943 0.02325 791 470 251 70
120 Are they still back there? 1.4941 0.03068 506 313 136 57
121 Next time, click the "I AGREE" button. 1.4890 0.02662 681 427 175 79
122 I liked it better when we won with shock and awe instead of fear and loathing. 1.4889 0.02653 722 462 167 93
123 I could swear he said we'd lead the battle for 'gold and sex', not 'Goldman Sachs'. 1.4839 0.02787 651 419 149 83
124 We should have brought our boxers instead of briefs! 1.4816 0.02967 571 368 131 72
125 They're from the firm of Genghis and Khan. 1.4815 0.02844 596 378 149 69
126 I keep telling them. I don't need life insurance. 1.4813 0.02705 669 427 162 80
127 We will gain untold riches, less thirty percent of course. 1.4813 0.04695 187 112 60 15
128 I didn't sign up for this level of barbarism. 1.4809 0.02590 680 423 187 70
129 Next time, read the Terms of service. 1.4787 0.02670 658 415 171 72
130 If you say whatever suits you one more time......! 1.4767 0.02793 602 381 155 66
131 If it's a battle of wits, our guys are only half-armed. 1.4745 0.02975 628 426 106 96
132 No way they can withstand the billable hours... 1.4724 0.02566 616 373 195 48
133 They are from Goldman Saxons 1.4723 0.03369 451 297 95 59
134 His Majesty wants us to either win the battle or tie it up in the courts for years! 1.4721 0.02736 610 385 162 63
135 At the edge of the cliff, you go left, I go right. 1.4716 0.02897 564 361 140 63
136 The streets will run red with ink 1.4707 0.02868 563 358 145 60
137 Oh, they will feel the mighty wrath of Smith, Hogarth and Cheney! 1.4684 0.03422 380 239 104 37
138 At dawn, we file an injunction. 1.4683 0.02742 583 365 163 55
139 Shock and law. 1.4674 0.02851 582 375 142 65
140 Billing rate of $500 per hour... and they call us the Barbarians? 1.4673 0.03138 490 318 115 57
141 Remember when looting and pillaging was an honorable profession? 1.4673 0.02860 565 361 144 60
142 Covfefe! 1.4649 0.03411 456 308 84 64
143 I miss the days when we could raid and plunder without having to run it by the lawyers first. 1.4618 0.02764 550 343 160 47
144 It only took 200 billable hours to sack Constantinople. 1.4615 0.02802 546 343 154 49
145 Is this their first corporate retreat? 1.4597 0.02960 533 346 129 58
146 I told the King not to involve H.R. 1.4597 0.02838 533 336 149 48
147 Wait until they find out we only need two of them. 1.4507 0.03131 426 270 120 36
148 We mean business. 1.4481 0.02961 482 308 132 42
149 They have taken all the fun out of pillaging. 1.4466 0.02915 468 294 139 35
150 Legal says do NOT call it a "Crusade." 1.4461 0.02878 473 296 143 34
151 In a hostile takeover, you can never have enough lawyers. 1.4444 0.03033 459 295 124 40
152 Just once, I'd like to do a hostile takeover the old-fashioned way. 1.4385 0.03253 431 287 99 45
153 We can still loot and pillage, but we need to fill out 1099's. 1.4384 0.03490 349 227 91 31
154 Do you have ANY IDEA what this is costing us? 1.4351 0.03140 416 269 113 34
155 We Came, We Sued, We Conquered. 1.4351 0.03389 416 283 85 48
156 Didn't I tell you that the Republicans would follow me? 1.4324 0.03225 407 267 104 36
157 The idea is to bore the enemy to death. 1.4324 0.03168 414 270 109 35
158 Sir, I regret to inform you that news of the battle was leaked to the personal injury lawyers. 1.4320 0.03234 412 272 102 38
159 This time we'll settle accounts once and for all 1.4307 0.03298 404 269 96 39
160 Whaddaya mean the worst is behind us? 1.4293 0.03364 396 266 90 40
161 We should win this battle. We have the law on our side. 1.4293 0.03188 396 257 108 31
162 I miss the old days when we could just rape and pillage. 1.4289 0.03260 394 259 101 34
163 Nothing is more terrifying than an army of lawyers. 1.4267 0.03288 389 257 98 34
164 So then I say, "Barbarian? That's libel." And then HE says, 'Oh yeah, what you gonna do about it?" 1.4262 0.04057 305 214 52 39
165 It's going to be an extremely hostile takeover, mark my words! 1.4249 0.03116 386 247 114 25
166 It could be worse--I heard Kevin got stuck with the Children's Crusade. 1.4248 0.03410 379 255 87 37
167 Well ...when Khan described it, attorney general sounded so cool! 1.4225 0.03442 374 253 84 37
168 Maybe we shouldn't have sacked Washington. 1.4205 0.03418 371 250 86 35
169 No army can beat the Spanish Deposition. 1.4203 0.03573 364 251 73 40
170 I thought today was Casual Friday. 1.4201 0.03344 369 245 93 31
171 These corporate retreats get weirder every year. 1.4199 0.03566 362 249 74 39
172 This new generation of looters and pillagers... 1.4174 0.03557 357 245 75 37
173 I prefer the old way of pillaging. 1.4148 0.03083 352 222 114 16
174 You were right - we never should have conquered Wall Street. 1.4148 0.03615 352 244 70 38
175 You go to war with the army you have. 1.4135 0.03484 341 229 83 29
176 As I've always said, you don't bring a knife to a proxy fight. 1.4133 0.06869 75 48 23 4
177 Pillaging? Not so much. But, trust me, they're great at looting! 1.4132 0.03808 288 194 69 25
178 We appeal at dawn. 1.4119 0.03633 318 215 75 28
179 If we're going to sue for peace, I want to do it right. 1.4118 0.03311 340 222 96 22
180 This is going to be an audit they'll never forget 1.4118 0.03539 340 231 78 31
181 Something tells me writing the peace treaty will take longer than the war. 1.4107 0.03363 336 221 92 23
182 There may be only two of us left but we will bury them in paperwork! 1.4084 0.03435 333 222 86 25
183 I kind of miss the old horde. 1.4079 0.03655 331 229 69 33
184 It's less a crusade than a hostile takeover. 1.4079 0.03396 331 219 89 23
185 Next time be more specific when you order a thousand mercenaries." 1.4077 0.04129 260 180 54 26
186 I really thought 'army of lawyers' was just a figure of speech. 1.4070 0.04151 258 179 53 26
187 This time we mean business. 1.4068 0.03487 322 215 83 24
188 The strategy is to wear them down with discovery and subpoenas. 1.4067 0.03196 327 209 103 15
189 The princess wants an airtight prenup. 1.4044 0.03646 319 219 71 29
190 Because it turns out, there were some things a barbarian wouldn't do 1.4044 0.03673 319 220 69 30
191 Because there were no ambulances for them to chase. 1.4038 0.03689 317 219 68 30
192 Thank god we were able to find some mercenaries. 1.4032 0.03678 315 217 69 29
193 "Where is this Mar-a-Lago? 1.4032 0.04045 315 231 41 43
194 I heard it with my own ears. They fear a tax from the north. 1.4026 0.03638 313 214 72 27
195 After the pillaging comes the paperwork. 1.4026 0.03495 313 209 82 22
196 Frankly, I hope we lose. 1.4026 0.03910 313 224 52 37
197 Not at all what I expected when they appointed me Attorney General. 1.4000 0.03801 310 218 60 32
198 I like your idea about putting the associates over the wall with catapults. 1.3994 0.03846 308 218 57 33
199 Looting and pillaging just isn't the same since Dodd-Frank. 1.3987 0.03780 306 214 62 30
200 And you're sure he didn't mean Sioux? 1.3980 0.03769 304 212 63 29
201 International law has soooo ruined the crusades. 1.3974 0.03608 302 205 74 23
202 This will show Atilla that we mean business! 1.3967 0.03530 300 201 79 20
203 Please tell me these guys are on contingency 1.3966 0.03790 295 205 63 27
204 It’s 9 now. At least you know the fighting will stop at 5. 1.3966 0.03667 295 201 71 23
205 We may get slaughtered, but the hourly rate we negotiated will make us legends. 1.3960 0.03609 298 202 74 22
206 OK so how 'bout pillaging. Can we still pillage? 1.3953 0.03593 296 200 75 21
207 I think tomorrow is causal Friday 1.3953 0.03625 296 201 73 22
208 I thought you were speaking metaphorically when you said we'd need an army of lawyers. 1.3938 0.03658 292 199 71 22
209 I don't know about Brooks Brothers sponsoring the crusade. 1.3908 0.03793 284 197 63 24
210 New strategy. Follow the money. 1.3908 0.03485 284 188 81 15
211 We've drained the swamp, now what do we do with them? 1.3901 0.03778 282 195 64 23
212 First, sow confusion. 1.3885 0.03780 278 192 64 22
213 Now we get the same results, but without all the property damage. 1.3869 0.05884 137 100 21 16
214 When they answer the door, tell them it's just a routine audit. 1.3869 0.03526 274 182 78 14
215 Don’t turn around but that one with the mustache is freaking me out. 1.3820 0.03918 267 188 56 23
216 Sack one village and the paperwork will just kill you. 1.3820 0.03846 267 186 60 21
217 We'll win. We've got all their lawyers. 1.3811 0.03974 265 188 53 24
218 It's gonna take an army of lawyers to get that hateful ignorant lying greedy narcissistic dirtbag out of power. 1.3803 0.04307 234 168 43 23
219 Is it just me, or has pillaging lost its magic? 1.3784 0.03962 259 183 54 22
220 Did you read the script? 1.3784 0.03886 259 181 58 20
221 You fed our horses beans ? 1.3783 0.04446 230 168 37 25
222 No, Ambu, lance chasers! 1.3779 0.03854 262 183 59 20
223 Well, you did say to suit up. 1.3774 0.03867 257 179 59 19
224 The Huns decided to settle. 1.3765 0.03807 255 176 62 17
225 No matter what they ask, say "I don't specifically recall". 1.3765 0.03847 255 177 60 18
226 I said an army for all eternity. Not for all attorneys. 1.3750 0.03835 256 178 60 18
227 I had more fun at the gay pride parade 1.3745 0.04087 251 180 48 23
228 We'll have a contract drawn and quartered. 1.3745 0.03719 251 171 66 14
229 Surprisingly, I have not heard one objection. 1.3745 0.03845 243 167 61 15
230 I warned him about that 'See you in court!' tweet. 1.3735 0.03948 249 175 55 19
231 I hate income tax invasions! 1.3732 0.05530 142 103 25 14
232 I preferred the old days when we sacked instead of sued. 1.3725 0.03969 247 174 54 19
233 I can't believe they think we can get their money back from Trump University . 1.3719 0.04685 199 145 34 20
234 We're going to attack their capital. 1.3714 0.07385 70 49 16 5
235 It's Tennyson redux: "Into the valley of death March the Forbes 500." 1.3714 0.03991 245 173 53 19
236 We enjoyed this much more when we could go out to invade, subjugate, and pillage without getting an OK from legal. 1.3710 0.04196 248 181 42 25
237 Relax, we're too big to fail. 1.3704 0.04096 243 174 48 21
238 Mediation just wasn't possible. 1.3699 0.03488 246 163 75 8
239 Who knew this is where a law degree would take me? 1.3693 0.04034 241 171 51 19
240 They don't call me Attila the Litigator for nothing. 1.3689 0.03870 244 170 58 16
241 Now that you mention it, our conquered foes did seem almost happy to give us these slaves, didn't they? 1.3688 0.05641 141 104 22 15
242 Lose just one bag of pillage and it's audit, audit, audit. 1.3682 0.03788 239 164 62 13
243 Ixnay on the lawyer jokes. 1.3682 0.03741 239 163 64 12
244 For the record: this is not what I meant by hostile takeover. 1.3682 0.03788 239 164 62 13
245 Do not underestimate the element of surprise. 1.3682 0.04100 239 171 48 20
246 He did say an army of lawyers, right? 1.3678 0.03801 242 167 61 14
247 So the guy's lawyer says to me "Yeah, you and who else's army?" 1.3671 0.04035 237 168 51 18
248 All I'm saying is those filthy swine better have their receipts in order. 1.3671 0.04123 237 170 47 20
249 Not such a bad deal - only twelve thousand lawyers for our two spies. 1.3660 0.04012 235 166 52 17
250 This is the worst Crusade yet. 1.3660 0.04057 235 167 50 18
251 It just seems excessively barbaric. 1.3660 0.04146 235 169 46 20
252 My father sacked Rome without a single lawyer. 1.3654 0.04905 156 110 35 11
253 Sure, the catapults will soften them up, but the fusillade of paper will bury them. 1.3648 0.03942 233 163 55 15
254 Carying that thing is just a lawsuit waiting to happen 1.3648 0.04214 233 169 43 21
255 The second that first ambulance siren sounds, it's on. 1.3648 0.03749 233 159 63 11
256 Ignore them, they're personal injury lawyers. 1.3636 0.04010 231 163 52 16
257 Don't worry. We've got the law on our side. 1.3636 0.03963 231 162 54 15
258 This morning's Tweet said this is the last of the Justice Department group 1.3628 0.04070 226 160 50 16
259 I miss the days when all we did was rape and pillage. 1.3624 0.04033 229 162 51 16
260 I miss the old horde! 1.3616 0.03944 224 156 55 13
261 I told you my Ted Talk would be inspiring. 1.3604 0.03966 222 155 54 13
262 Let's hope the pen really is mightier than the sword. 1.3591 0.04240 220 159 43 18
263 No one knows the Magna Carta like Weinstein MacDougall & Strauss. 1.3578 0.04166 218 156 46 16
264 Will we ever get back to raping and pillage? 1.3578 0.04166 218 156 46 16
265 I know, but they'll do anything to win. 1.3578 0.04011 218 153 52 13
266 Just so you know, I beheaded a guy for wearing a blazer and khakies. 1.3578 0.04554 218 164 30 24
267 I knew we shouldn't have have accepted their LinkedIn invitation. 1.3565 0.04086 216 153 49 14
268 Trust me- they're expecting arrows and swords. They'll never see the audit coming. 1.3565 0.04086 216 153 49 14
269 We're bringing our lawyers. They're bringing their accountants. It should get ugly! 1.3551 0.04057 214 151 50 13
270 I hate corporate retreats. 1.3538 0.04345 212 155 39 18
271 We'll soon know how many lawyers it takes to screw in a light bulb. 1.3538 0.04595 212 160 29 23
272 If they’re so confident about the pen theory, why are we in front? 1.3538 0.04188 212 152 45 15
273 Are you sure it's "Shock and audit"? 1.3510 0.04184 208 149 45 14
274 I called ONE lender for quote on a new mortgage.... 1.3500 0.04469 200 147 36 17
275 We'll charge first. They'll charge by the hour. 1.3495 0.04153 206 147 46 13
276 It' a lot easier this way. The peasants don't fight. They just flee. 1.3493 0.04167 209 150 45 14
277 So, first we kill all the lawyers, what's next? 1.3480 0.04178 204 146 45 13
278 I guess we are going to tax them to death. 1.3465 0.04085 202 143 48 11
279 Genghis Cohen will be quite pleased with our conquest. 1.3465 0.04376 202 148 38 16
280 I thought this was casual Friday. 1.3465 0.04085 202 143 48 11
281 If an army of lawyers doesn't scare them, I don't know what will. 1.3465 0.03900 202 140 54 8
282 This is the final onslaught, if it fails, we will be forced to launch the impeachment hearings. 1.3463 0.04439 205 152 35 18
283 Listen, at least you have a prenup. 1.3463 0.03737 205 140 59 6
284 I've no problem with normal raping and pillaging but isn't using lawyers barbaric? 1.3463 0.04103 205 146 47 12
285 I claimed pillaging as a deductible business expense. 1.3448 0.04128 203 145 46 12
286 The road to Hell is paved with good exemptions. 1.3433 0.04031 201 142 49 10
287 They've been following me every since I got rearended by a chariot. 1.3433 0.04328 201 147 39 15
288 I pity the enemy when the auditors get through with them. 1.3433 0.04212 201 145 43 13
289 I love fighting for a good clause. 1.3433 0.04328 201 147 39 15
290 We're gonna stipulate them to death. 1.3433 0.04031 201 142 49 10
291 Should we tell them we are lost? 1.3427 0.04649 178 131 33 14
292 The crusade of the ambulance chasers 1.3420 0.04266 193 139 42 12
293 I know they all went to college, but do they actually have any real skills? 1.3420 0.04202 193 138 44 11
294 Why would I ask you to get the men "suits of Armani" for the battle? 1.3420 0.04688 193 146 28 19
295 Let's gallop and see what happens 1.3418 0.04403 196 144 37 15
296 An team of male, white billionaires led by medieval, Machiavellian swagger--how could we possibly lose this battle? 1.3418 0.04520 196 146 33 17
297 The pen better be mightier than the sword. 1.3417 0.04116 199 142 46 11
298 Next year I'm doing estimated taxes to avoid all this. 1.3403 0.04028 191 134 49 8
299 Remember, the lawyers go into battle first. That way we'll be popular whether we win or lose. 1.3403 0.04836 191 147 23 21
300 I almost hope we lose. 1.3403 0.04419 191 140 37 14
301 Ever since we switched from Vikings to lawyers, no one wants to take us on. 1.3402 0.04371 194 142 38 14
302 That's the last time we pillage the 5:14 to Stamford! 1.3402 0.04371 194 142 38 14
303 We used to be savage, now we're ruthless. 1.3402 0.04247 194 140 42 12
304 To sue your rivals. See them driven to bankruptcy. Hear the lamentations of their shareholders. 1.3401 0.04325 197 144 39 14
305 The troops are looking forward to Casual Friday. 1.3401 0.04325 197 144 39 14
306 You can tell them that the librarians are at the gates. 1.3386 0.04695 189 143 28 18
307 If you're gonna pillage, you gotta lawyer up. 1.3385 0.04291 195 142 40 13
308 It's going to be a hostile takeover. 1.3371 0.04282 178 127 42 9
309 I miss being above the law. 1.3351 0.04377 185 135 38 12
310 They say all of those purses are filled with fearsome weapons called "subpoenas." 1.3351 0.04171 185 132 44 9
311 I can't go any slower! Why don't they just pass us ?? 1.3351 0.04638 185 139 30 16
312 Pillaging was much more fun before legal got involved. 1.3351 0.03954 185 129 50 6
313 The hardest thing to get right in battle is the liability waiver. 1.3351 0.04241 185 133 42 10
314 And I thought our uniforms were bad. 1.3333 0.04197 183 131 43 9
315 Well, scorched earth leads to a lot of litigation. 1.3333 0.04406 183 134 37 12
316 An early example of ambulance chasing. 1.3333 0.04424 186 137 36 13
317 Let's see them break through my legal defense. 1.3315 0.04249 184 133 41 10
318 They heard that there will be an ambulance on site. 1.3315 0.04223 181 130 42 9
319 You heard the orders, "No more working from home! Round 'em up and bring 'em in!" 1.3315 0.04366 181 132 38 11
320 This will be a brief battle. 1.3297 0.04617 182 137 30 15
321 Why do personal injury lawyers always follow us? 1.3297 0.04484 182 135 34 13
322 I always get uncomfortable when the ambulance chasers follow us into battle. 1.3296 0.04466 179 132 35 12
323 Are you sure you told that consultant that we wanted to "liquidate" our enemies, and not "litigate" them? 1.3296 0.04466 179 132 35 12
324 Who knew? An army of lawyers gets me so much more than weapons ever did. 1.3296 0.04323 179 130 39 10
325 If you can't beat 'em, sue 'em. 1.3296 0.04323 179 130 39 10
326 Couldn't we have just signed a waiver? 1.3296 0.04323 179 130 39 10
327 There'd damn well better be a fortune in beans to count. 1.3296 0.04395 179 131 37 11
328 They'll do things slaves won't do and the King isn't all that attached to them. 1.3282 0.05573 131 100 19 12
329 You destroy ONE tiny village and all of a sudden you've got 1000 insurance claims on your hands... 1.3278 0.04303 180 131 39 10
330 I sure hope both sides got the same memo. 1.3278 0.04445 180 133 35 12
331 Veni, vidi, sued the bastards. 1.3277 0.04425 177 130 36 11
332 I understand that in the future they will be referred to as Ambulance Chasers. 1.3277 0.04277 177 128 40 9
333 It's the sequel: Game of Drones 1.3277 0.04568 177 132 32 13
334 First we pillage, then we sue. 1.3277 0.04637 177 133 30 14
335 Why do we always get stuck with the corporate raiders? 1.3277 0.04352 177 129 38 10
336 Remember when they were ambulance chasers? 1.3277 0.04568 177 132 32 13
337 I was okay with the flaming arrows. I even understood the plague-infected rats. All I'm saying is that sending in lawyers seems a bit over the top. 1.3276 0.04326 174 126 39 9
338 A gig's a gig, but I do think this is going to be the worst 'Hobbit' movie yet. 1.3276 0.04902 174 134 23 17
339 ...then, at the first signs of their surrender, we send in our closers. 1.3276 0.04248 174 125 41 8
340 Remember, You turn left and I'll turn right... and they will continue over the cliff. 1.3276 0.04477 174 128 35 11
341 When I asked for an army that meant business, this isn't what I had in mind. 1.3257 0.04877 175 135 23 17
342 I really hate these post plunder audits. 1.3257 0.04741 175 133 27 15
343 Weekend warriors my ass. 1.3257 0.04528 175 130 33 12
344 I thought we'd try boring the enemy to death! 1.3256 0.04508 172 127 34 11
345 Game of drones. Season one. 1.3256 0.04354 172 125 38 9
346 You would be surprised how much damage and destruction economists can cause. 1.3256 0.04656 172 129 30 13
347 If you can't beat them in battle, bill them by the hour. 1.3256 0.04432 172 126 36 10
348 Another banner day for G.Khan and Associates. 1.3256 0.04800 172 131 26 15
349 Surrender, or be audited! 1.3256 0.04508 172 127 34 11
350 Do they really still think this is a corporate retreat? 1.3239 0.04717 176 134 27 15
351 I got to wondering why use force to expand the empire when we can just do it via mergers and acquisitions? 1.3235 0.04616 170 127 31 12
352 Of course they don't fear hell. They're FROM hell! 1.3214 0.04493 168 124 34 10
353 They’re here to help us monetize the barbaric, 1.3214 0.04725 168 127 28 13
354 I bet when we said we'd bring an army of lawyers they thought we were being figurative. 1.3214 0.04946 168 130 22 16
355 So the King said, 'I'll hire a lawyer.' And the Queen replied, "I can hire more lawyers than you can.' 1.3195 0.04626 169 127 30 12
356 They say the streets are paved with loopholes. 1.3195 0.04228 169 122 40 7
357 Lawyers are expensive and not great warriors but I like their total lack of mercy. 1.3195 0.04626 169 127 30 12
358 It will be the greatest bureaucratic empire the world has ever known. 1.3195 0.04228 169 122 40 7
359 Did he say 'kill all the lawyers or all the accountants'?? 1.3195 0.04228 169 122 40 7
360 Just so you know, I had a guy flogged for wearing a blazer and khakies. 1.3195 0.04626 169 127 30 12
361 Look at that! All walking in step behind the horses ass. Must be republicans. 1.3193 0.05058 166 130 19 17
362 They don't look stout-hearted to me. 1.3174 0.04502 167 124 33 10
363 Leading these pilgrimages to Silicon Valley every year pays for my horse, my armor, and my iPhone. 1.3174 0.04659 167 126 29 12
364 They must think we're an accident waiting to happen. 1.3174 0.04255 167 121 39 7
365 He said, first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers." 1.3174 0.04736 167 127 27 13
366 You're a little young to remember, but battles were fought outside of the courtroom. 1.3174 0.04338 167 122 37 8
367 First we kill all their lawyers. 1.3174 0.04659 167 126 29 12
368 I'm expecting a legal battle 1.3171 0.04557 164 122 32 10
369 I'll give you ten to one odds this case will settle. 1.3168 0.04529 161 119 33 9
370 ... and 140 characters later I had complete control of the Republican Party. 1.3168 0.04939 161 124 23 14
371 We'll bury them in lawsuits. 1.3168 0.05094 161 126 19 16
372 I know there's no hope on the battlefield, but my plan is to lure him into court. 1.3168 0.04172 161 115 41 5
373 On my command, let the auditing begin. 1.3168 0.04354 161 117 37 7
374 Didn’t they tell you … this is going to be a legal battle! 1.3168 0.04264 161 116 39 6
375 I'd rather have huns too, but attorneys were the only expendable troops we could get. 1.3152 0.04533 165 123 32 10
376 They only march from 9 to 5. 1.3148 0.04420 162 119 35 8
377 I know we wanted a brief battle, but this is ridiculous. 1.3148 0.04505 162 120 33 9
378 Supposedly they're great at pillaging. 1.3145 0.04733 159 120 28 11
379 God I miss the fight. Now it's just lawyer them to death. 1.3145 0.04384 159 116 36 7
380 It's the perfect Supreme Court decision for a post-industrial and globalized capitalism that emphasizes making money off of political power plays and exploitation of public resources rather than the competitive production of goods and services. 1.3145 0.05213 159 126 16 17
381 I hate legal battles. 1.3145 0.04474 159 117 34 8
382 "First, kill all the lawyers," sounds good, but who knew it would require so much paperwork? 1.3145 0.05058 159 124 20 15
383 Rape and pillage are fine as far as they go, but nothing drops them to their knees like an audit. 1.3129 0.04397 163 120 35 8
384 But what if we're not an accident waiting to happen? 1.3129 0.04130 163 117 41 5
385 Blood, boils, locusts, frogs, pestilence...how could things possibly get any worse? 1.3097 0.04718 155 117 28 10
386 War's a lot less fun than it used to be. 1.3097 0.04806 155 118 26 11
387 I'll teach Hammurabi a thing or two about codes. 1.3097 0.05143 155 122 18 15
388 I miss the old days. 1.3097 0.04718 155 117 28 10
389 You should see them wield subpoenas. 1.3077 0.04603 156 117 30 9
390 I don't think that they're well suited for this job. 1.3077 0.04512 156 116 32 8
391 I plan to dethrone him using the emoluments clause. 1.3072 0.04932 153 118 23 12
392 Don't forget that Rome wasn't audited in a day. 1.3072 0.04475 153 113 33 7
393 I told them they'd be hearing from my lawyers. 1.3072 0.04754 153 116 27 10
394 Do you have any idea why these men are following us? 1.3072 0.04754 153 116 27 10
395 So I hear the Queen has asked for a divorce. 1.3072 0.04570 153 114 31 8
396 No one can say we don't mean business. 1.3072 0.04475 153 113 33 7
397 The king called for full court press. 1.3067 0.04329 150 109 36 5
398 A thousand years from tomorrow's victory all they will remember are the billable hours. 1.3067 0.04432 150 110 34 6
399 If we don’t win we don’t pay. 1.3067 0.04629 150 112 30 8
400 A hostile takeover ain't what it used to be. 1.3067 0.04629 150 112 30 8
401 We will strike mild irritation into their hearts! 1.3067 0.04725 150 113 28 9
402 We came, we saw, we sued. 1.3067 0.04629 150 112 30 8
403 I don't think this orgy is going to be as much fun as the last one. 1.3052 0.04727 154 117 27 10
404 I said I wanted suits of mail, not males in suits. 1.3052 0.04904 154 119 23 12
405 As soon as they start in with the catapults, we'll hit them with attempted manslaughter. 1.3052 0.04544 154 115 31 8
406 We'll see who discovered America first. 1.3046 0.04791 151 115 26 10
407 I'm confident we can mount a vigorous defense. 1.3046 0.04603 151 113 30 8
408 This may actually be considered a war crime. 1.3041 0.04564 148 110 31 7
409 Their type will always follow a horse's arse anywhere. 1.3041 0.05042 148 115 21 12
410 I never thought I'd be rooting for the other side. 1.3041 0.04761 148 112 27 9
411 I just always assumed that an army of lawyers was a figure of speech. 1.3041 0.04564 148 110 31 7
412 They all have MBAs. They have no more idea where they’re going than we do 1.3041 0.04664 148 111 29 8
413 The Saracens will rue the day they took on Barstow, Wiggins, Fenucci & Clarke. 1.3041 0.04857 148 113 25 10
414 We’re merciless? Wait until you see their hourly fees. 1.3041 0.04761 148 112 27 9
415 How we going to get them back by five? 1.3041 0.04761 148 112 27 9
416 We're bringing the lawyers, but somebody better be bringing the guns and money. 1.3041 0.04761 148 112 27 9
417 We got a deal on them – used to work for the EPA. 1.3041 0.04857 148 113 25 10
418 Brexit my Ass! 1.3041 0.04857 148 113 25 10
419 Every one of them thinks he'll make partner. 1.3026 0.04577 152 114 30 8
420 If they think we're ruthless, wait to they get a load of our lawyers. 1.3026 0.05030 152 119 20 13
421 I sure hope the pen is mightier than the sword 1.3026 0.05116 152 120 18 14
422 If an army of lawyers doesn't scare them, nothing will. 1.3026 0.04671 152 115 28 9
423 We need to hurry up, they charge by the hour. 1.3020 0.04733 149 113 27 9
424 I love the smell of leather briefcases before a battle. 1.2986 0.04735 144 109 27 8
425 Now we'll see who refuses to pay their taxes. 1.2986 0.05033 144 112 21 11
426 What do you mean, 'nobody likes me?' I have over a million followers. 1.2986 0.04735 144 109 27 8
427 The king said he wanted men who could insure a victory. 1.2966 0.04807 145 111 25 9
428 When I told them it was a class action, the lawyers were all in. 1.2966 0.04807 145 111 25 9
429 So this is how suing for peace works? 1.2966 0.04807 145 111 25 9
430 Nothing stops a revolution faster than an injunction. 1.2955 0.04898 132 100 25 7
431 I got them cheap after they were dumped by the Oscars. 1.2950 0.05152 139 109 19 11
432 It's Game of Drones - the final season. 1.2950 0.04729 139 105 27 7
433 If this battle doesn't kill us the legal fees will. 1.2950 0.04618 139 104 29 6
434 We evolved into this? 1.2950 0.04729 139 105 27 7
435 Now do you believe your war cry sounds like an ambulance? 1.2950 0.04838 139 106 25 8
436 There will be blood. And if I happen to slip and fall... 1.2950 0.05049 139 108 21 10
437 Only the long arc of history will tell how the Great Anti-Trust War of 1457 will be remembered 1.2937 0.05044 143 112 20 11
438 They're here to value the spoils of war. 1.2937 0.04637 143 108 28 7
439 Never mind pillage and plunder, we're going to sue the pants off them. 1.2937 0.05044 143 112 20 11
440 I asked for Satan's Army and this is what they sent me. 1.2937 0.05141 143 113 18 12
441 An attack of this kind will be unprecedented 1.2937 0.04742 143 109 26 8
442 Do you ever feel like they're running out of ideas for the corporate retreat? 1.2929 0.05412 140 113 13 14
443 Boss says we only have to get the first guy off the cliff. 1.2929 0.04808 140 107 25 8
444 The command was to lawyer up. 1.2929 0.04808 140 107 25 8
445 I think they are verifying our mileage. 1.2929 0.04914 140 108 23 9
446 You better hope they're not billing by the hour. 1.2908 0.04562 141 106 29 6
447 You go to war with the army you got. 1.2908 0.04562 141 106 29 6
448 I said 'suits of mail', Kensworth: not 'male suits'. 1.2908 0.04884 141 109 23 9
449 I told Attila to do a prenup, but he was in love. 1.2908 0.04449 141 105 31 5
450 I've come to love that combination of dread and excitement I get as we prepare for litigation. 1.2899 0.04736 138 105 26 7
451 We're hoping to challenge the stereotype of the lawless horde. 1.2889 0.05028 135 105 21 9
452 At least we pay nothing if we don't win 1.2889 0.04687 135 102 27 6
453 Crusades are getting so over-regulated. 1.2889 0.04803 135 103 25 7
454 I don't know... I just put out a bowl of food and now they won't go away. 1.2889 0.04917 135 104 23 8
455 That was war. This is business. 1.2889 0.04917 135 104 23 8
456 Do you think these guys have any idea of what they're getting into by joining the white house legal team? 1.2889 0.05137 135 106 19 10
457 Well, that got out of hand pretty quickly, didn't it? 1.2889 0.04803 135 103 25 7
458 Caesar said using auditors was too brutal, but I disagree. 1.2870 0.05432 108 83 19 6
459 Thy Rod and my Staff--they comfort me. 1.2868 0.04657 136 103 27 6
460 I came, I saw, I settled. 1.2868 0.05103 136 107 19 10
461 This time I thought we'd sue them back to the stone age. 1.2868 0.04772 136 104 25 7
462 I think thay're taking this "pen is mightier than the sword" thing too literally! 1.2868 0.04538 136 102 29 5
463 Lawyer up. It's the new siege mentality. 1.2868 0.04772 136 104 25 7
464 Let the enemy come with their spears and arrows, for they shall feel the might of our sternly worded letters! 1.2868 0.04885 136 105 23 8
465 They're calling it "The Mother of all Audits." 1.2868 0.04772 136 104 25 7
466 Are we overdressed or underdressed? 1.2868 0.04772 136 104 25 7
467 I got them cheap from Enron. 1.2857 0.04600 133 100 28 5
468 The ambulance chasers are getting worse. 1.2836 0.04691 134 102 26 6
469 Call me old fashioned, but conquering on appeal isn't nearly as much fun. 1.2836 0.05037 134 105 20 9
470 Worst of all, the performance reviews take forever. 1.2836 0.04809 134 103 24 7
471 Actually, given what we just did, the number of lawyers is appropriate. 1.2836 0.05037 134 105 20 9
472 Seriously ! You think you might have to make a personal injury claim ? 1.2836 0.04925 134 104 22 8
473 I still say a bloody inquisition is a lot more exciting than a friendly acquisition. 1.2836 0.04925 134 104 22 8
474 They can't fight, but they make great hostages. 1.2836 0.04691 134 102 26 6
475 My head says merge and consolidate assets, but my heart says pillage. 1.2836 0.04809 134 103 24 7
476 I just love a good hostile takeover! 1.2836 0.04809 134 103 24 7
477 It's all in the numbers, Vlad. All in the numbers. 1.2836 0.04925 134 104 22 8
478 Why Mexico would swap day-laborers for day-traders is beyond me. 1.2836 0.04925 134 104 22 8
479 Do we really need this many PETA reps to film this scene? 1.2836 0.04809 134 103 24 7
480 Auditing is okay, but I miss the raping and pillaging. 1.2836 0.05037 134 105 20 9
481 As soon as marketing commits itself, release the accountants! 1.2836 0.04570 134 101 28 5
482 The lawyers are expendable, but make sure the accountants get air support. 1.2836 0.04691 134 102 26 6
483 Somehow this was a lot more fun before OSHA got involved. 1.2836 0.04925 134 104 22 8
484 These audits are really getting out of control. 1.2836 0.04809 134 103 24 7
485 They've all been hired to represent each of His Majesty's tweets. 1.2836 0.05148 134 106 18 10
486 It's just not the same since we lawyer'ed up. 1.2836 0.04809 134 103 24 7
487 I miss the days when we could pillage and plunder without legal representation. 1.2824 0.04758 131 100 25 6
488 Tell your men to get ready. At first light, we subpoena. 1.2824 0.04758 131 100 25 6
489 Well, let's hope the pen really is mightier... 1.2812 0.04565 128 96 28 4
490 They'll rue the day they crossed the Liti-goths! 1.2812 0.04827 128 98 24 6
491 I never read the damned agreements before I maraud, do you? 1.2812 0.04953 128 99 22 7
492 The enemy will soon learn that the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.2812 0.04953 128 99 22 7
493 I knew those paternity suits would catch up with me. 1.2803 0.05193 132 105 17 10
494 We will sue them back into the Middle Ages. 1.2803 0.04847 132 102 23 7
495 We're going to settle this one once and for all. 1.2803 0.05080 132 104 19 9
496 You were there with me... I distinctly asked for 'more warriors'. 1.2803 0.04602 132 100 27 5
497 Yeah, you're right, this is a lot less exciting, but I feel safer here in the legal department. 1.2791 0.05389 129 104 14 11
498 It's a well-regulated militia. 1.2791 0.05041 129 101 20 8
499 They're mercenaries. 1.2791 0.04919 129 100 22 7
500 Soon, all the world shall tremble in boredom! 1.2791 0.04794 129 99 24 6
501 Just be careful. They're waiting for a 'slip and fall'. 1.2791 0.04794 129 99 24 6
502 Once more unto the breach of contract, my friend. 1.2791 0.04399 129 96 30 3
503 I say we march them right into the sea and be done with it. 1.2791 0.04919 129 100 22 7
504 Sacrificing of goat to Bahumat at 8:30, lecture on human resources at 9:15, coffee and danishes at 10. 1.2791 0.04666 129 98 26 5
505 And when you tell them they have to eat the enemy's heart, they are all like "Ewww! Ewww!". 1.2791 0.04794 129 99 24 6
506 Call me old fashioned but raping, pillaging, and lawyering up just doesn't have the same ring to it. 1.2791 0.05159 129 102 18 9
507 It took just one call to the personal injury help line! 1.2791 0.04919 129 100 22 7
508 I try not to think about the events that have led me to this exact point in my life. 1.2791 0.05041 129 101 20 8
509 It was that simple, I put an ad in the WSJ: Road Warriors Wanted 1.2791 0.05389 129 104 14 11
510 Sure they beat us last time, but now we've got Goldman Sachs behind us. 1.2791 0.04794 129 99 24 6
511 Remember when rape and pillage was respectable? 1.2791 0.05159 129 102 18 9
512 Careful, Waze says there is a vehicle stopped on shoulder. 1.2791 0.05275 129 103 16 10
513 I have seen the future and it is finance. 1.2778 0.04733 126 96 25 5
514 I fought the law and the law won 1.2778 0.05119 126 99 19 8
515 These audit trails get longer every year. 1.2764 0.04939 123 95 22 6
516 I hate these corporate takeovers 1.2764 0.04661 123 93 26 4
517 They don't seem to mind being led by barbarians. 1.2764 0.05328 123 98 16 9
518 It's the only way to take land from someone these days 1.2764 0.04210 123 90 32 1
519 Dammit, it says Recalculating! 1.2764 0.04802 123 94 24 5
520 Mediation? Back in my day we plundered and pillaged at will. 1.2764 0.05072 123 96 20 7
521 They might not open the drawbridge for the troops – but they're obliged to admit the auditors. 1.2764 0.04802 123 94 24 5
522 Between you and me, this Shakespeare guy better be right... 1.2764 0.04939 123 95 22 6
523 I don't know about you, but hostile takeovers just aren't the fun they used to be. 1.2764 0.05202 123 97 18 8
524 We're bound to win; hardly any of the enemy has passed the bar exam. 1.2764 0.05072 123 96 20 7
525 I specifically told you NOT to return that postcard inquiring about insurance. 1.2764 0.04939 123 95 22 6
526 Let's start a gentle trot and see how they do. 1.2764 0.04939 123 95 22 6
527 The king wants a tourney; I'm bringing 4,200 of 'em! 1.2764 0.05202 123 97 18 8
528 I was all prima facie. And he was all quid pro quo. 1.2764 0.05573 123 100 12 11
529 We'll make camp at the Holiday Inn Express. 1.2764 0.05072 123 96 20 7
530 Maybe we should move that big, round table into the conference room 1.2764 0.05452 123 99 14 10
531 Our lawyers are behind us. 1.2764 0.05328 123 98 16 9
532 Ah, for the good ol' days when one could rape and pillage without liability concerns. 1.2764 0.05072 123 96 20 7
533 By Herodotus, they've become much easier to lead. 1.2756 0.05554 127 104 11 12
534 Well, we DO commit a lot of HR violations ... 1.2756 0.04959 127 99 21 7
535 No, I did NOT ask for corporate raiders. 1.2756 0.05084 127 100 19 8
536 I'm lawyering up in case someone accuses us of colluding with the Russians. 1.2756 0.05084 127 100 19 8
537 When the Ex-Lax I mixed with the oats kicks in...it's going to be classic. 1.2756 0.05205 127 101 17 9
538 Damn Amulet Chasers! 1.2756 0.04427 127 95 29 3
539 I love the smell of tort claims in the morning. 1.2756 0.05084 127 100 19 8
540 So then I says,"But Ghengis, how can we possibly invade Wall Street?" And he says... 1.2756 0.04959 127 99 21 7
541 Don't look now, but we're being followed by a bunch of lance chasers... 1.2756 0.04832 127 98 23 6
542 Are we getting billed for this? 1.2756 0.04566 127 96 27 4
543 Stop complaining. You go to war with the army you have, not the army you want. 1.2756 0.04959 127 99 21 7
544 Send out a memo, we will stop soon and camp for the night. 1.2756 0.04566 127 96 27 4
545 These corporate retreats have really gotten out of hand. 1.2756 0.04832 127 98 23 6
546 In this day and age, you can't move aggressively without your legal team behind you. 1.2756 0.04832 127 98 23 6
547 I'm not sure how they will do building pyramids, but they will ROCK at building pyramid schemes. 1.2742 0.05164 124 98 18 8
548 When should we tell them the meeting was cancelled? 1.2742 0.05164 124 98 18 8
549 Put the lawyers up front. 1.2742 0.05290 124 99 16 9
550 That one with the little mustache gives me the creeps 1.2742 0.05036 124 97 20 7
551 They told me it's another attempt to ram through Trumpcare. 1.2742 0.05290 124 99 16 9
552 She may have dragons, but we have lawyers. 1.2742 0.04336 124 92 30 2
553 For someone who claims to be innocent, His Majesty is certainly lawyering up. 1.2742 0.05164 124 98 18 8
554 I say we keep calling them hostile takeovers 1.2742 0.04336 124 92 30 2
555 ...so I said "can't we just gut and flay them like we used to?" but management told me that what these lawyers can do is far worse. 1.2742 0.05164 124 98 18 8
556 Game of Loans 1.2742 0.04904 124 96 22 6
557 I miss the old days when we didn't have to lawyer up for every little pillage. 1.2742 0.04904 124 96 22 6
558 They will fear an army of accountants led by a warrior; they will not fear an army of warriors led by an accountant. 1.2735 0.05239 117 92 18 7
559 I guess the plan is to talk them to death. 1.2720 0.04454 125 94 28 3
560 These crusades are becoming so litigious... 1.2720 0.05128 125 99 18 8
561 This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I ran the ad for '10,000 men who enjoy plundering'... 1.2720 0.05252 125 100 16 9
562 The looting hardly seems worth it these days. 1.2720 0.04597 125 95 26 4
563 Frankly, I liked the way we used to collect taxes better. 1.2720 0.04735 125 96 24 5
564 We may steal and pillage but at least we don't bill by the hour 1.2720 0.04735 125 96 24 5
565 How long have you been a tour guide? 1.2720 0.05373 125 101 14 10
566 Now remember, when the arbitrage begins you follow my orders. 1.2720 0.04735 125 96 24 5
567 Our new battle cry will be "Death *and* taxes!" 1.2720 0.05128 125 99 18 8
568 She could just let me keep the condo on 80th and SHE get the East Hampton place, but NOOO!! 1.2720 0.04454 125 94 28 3
569 Before we can pillage, they'll need to sign a release. 1.2720 0.04597 125 95 26 4
570 What catapults? We just wear them down with endless litigation. 1.2720 0.04597 125 95 26 4
571 We'll tax them to death. 1.2689 0.05297 119 95 16 8
572 Sure, Hannibal might have elephants, but did he keep the receipts? 1.2689 0.04877 119 92 22 5
573 It's still a holy war. But now we call it a hostile takeover. 1.2689 0.05021 119 93 20 6
574 Never forget: we march for paragraph 3, subsection 8, lines 5-9! 1.2689 0.04877 119 92 22 5
575 The king says the answer is more suits on the ground. 1.2667 0.04694 120 92 24 4
576 This gift of lawyers will ravage our enemy more quickly than any plague. 1.2667 0.04543 120 91 26 3
577 I hate working security for those "leadership conferences." 1.2667 0.05257 120 96 16 8
578 I had them at "plunder". 1.2667 0.04841 120 93 22 5
579 You'd think we could do this just once without the lawyers. 1.2650 0.04763 117 90 23 4
580 I guess I should have specified suits of armor. 1.2650 0.04915 117 91 21 5
581 Not the most terrifying horde you've ever assembled, Gregor. 1.2650 0.04915 117 91 21 5
582 Don't look, but are they still there? 1.2650 0.04915 117 91 21 5
583 Should I tell them what hacking our enemies really means? 1.2650 0.05206 117 93 17 7
584 When the Great Khan says "Lawyer up!" we lawyer up! 1.2632 0.04671 114 87 24 3
585 I could have sworn the emperor said "lethal army". 1.2632 0.05145 114 90 18 6
586 The king wants to try negotiating first. 1.2632 0.04834 114 88 22 4
587 And then we sue them into submission. 1.2632 0.04671 114 87 24 3
588 Did you read Art of War or Art of the Deal? 1.2632 0.04671 114 87 24 3
589 If you are not the lead horse, the view is always the same. 1.2632 0.04992 114 89 20 5
590 Couldn't this have been an email? 1.2632 0.04992 114 89 20 5
591 First we negotiate the movie rights, then we lay siege. 1.2627 0.05305 118 95 15 8
592 We will lead you to the Prophet Margin! 1.2627 0.05305 118 95 15 8
593 Dodd-Frank doesn't stand a chance. 1.2627 0.04878 118 92 21 5
594 Give the order to Commence Billable Hours! 1.2627 0.05440 118 96 13 9
595 Yes, I miss the old ways of resolving conflict too. 1.2627 0.04728 118 91 23 4
596 What's not to like? Our army is bigger and pro bono! 1.2627 0.04572 118 90 25 3
597 The job isn't complete until the paperwork's done. 1.2609 0.04797 115 89 22 4
598 Do you think they know we're literally headhunters? 1.2609 0.05106 115 91 18 6
599 The good news is I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance. 1.2609 0.05396 115 93 14 8
600 And my mother STILL thinks I should have gone to law school. 1.2609 0.04797 115 89 22 4
601 They're still there, aren't they? 1.2609 0.05106 115 91 18 6
602 We'll overwhelm them with minutiae. 1.2609 0.04797 115 89 22 4
603 You know Gary, the lawyers have taken all of the fun out of Hostile Takeovers. 1.2609 0.04954 115 90 20 5
604 I can’t wait for the return of casual Fridays. 1.2589 0.05033 112 88 19 5
605 Yes, Tharg, we are also representing Jared Kushner. 1.2566 0.05591 113 93 11 9
606 Lawyer up!" just doesn't sound the same as "Charge! 1.2566 0.04666 113 87 23 3
607 I'm tired of hostile takeovers. 1.2566 0.04666 113 87 23 3
608 How far back do these conservatives want us to take them? 1.2566 0.05448 113 92 13 8
609 I still say that using accountants to invade other countries is barbaric. Not as cruel as the bankers we were using, but still... 1.2566 0.04833 113 88 21 4
610 You have but one question to answer: how shall this team-building day end? 1.2566 0.04993 113 89 19 5
611 We're about to launch the mother of all tax audits. 1.2566 0.05149 113 90 17 6
612 Bean counters! Will no one rid me of these bean counters? 1.2566 0.04993 113 89 19 5
613 Everyone is always going on about Attila and his cavalry. But I'll tell you what, nothing strikes fear into the hearts of men like a horde of forensic accountants coming over the horizon. 1.2566 0.05149 113 90 17 6
614 "You'll need an army of lawyers", he said. 1.2566 0.04993 113 89 19 5
615 Zack, remember in the old days it was the sword our enemy feared, but today, just the mere threat of litigation conquers all. 1.2566 0.05730 113 94 9 10
616 The attorneys go marching two by two: Hurrah, Hurrah ... 1.2566 0.04666 113 87 23 3
617 Pick up the pace. I've been told travel times are billable hours. 1.2545 0.05074 110 87 18 5
618 I miss the old days when we could pillage and plunder without fear of silly lawsuits 1.2545 0.04907 110 86 20 4
619 Stop acting like you don't even notice, they are like right behind us. 1.2545 0.05074 110 87 18 5
620 Last crusade I slipped and fell on wet cobblestones and was laid up a month. 1.2545 0.05236 110 88 16 6
621 They ordered us to seize and desist. 1.2523 0.05327 107 86 15 6
622 So, this is the first annual Covfefe Pride Parade. 1.2523 0.05159 107 85 17 5
623 So our competitor's CEO quipped, 'You don't have the guts to make a dramatic personnel move!' I said, 'Hold my beer.' 1.2523 0.05159 107 85 17 5
624 Your TED Talk went over a little too well. 1.2523 0.05159 107 85 17 5
625 We will defeat anyone, as long as it’s between 9-5 on weekdays. 1.2523 0.04618 107 82 23 2
626 We regulate the enemy into submission. 1.2523 0.05490 107 87 13 7
627 If you ask me, they should've never let Genghis watch "The Verdict." 1.2523 0.05802 107 89 9 9
628 Not sure why, but I've never been so scared. 1.2523 0.05159 107 85 17 5
629 She can have the Land of Ur, but I'll be damned if she's getting the Hummels. 1.2523 0.04985 107 84 19 4
630 On the count of three let's go into a gallop. 1.2523 0.05327 107 86 15 6
631 'Goldman Saxon' 1.2523 0.05327 107 86 15 6
632 He'll wish he'd never said, "So sue me." 1.2523 0.05952 107 90 7 10
633 I cant believe its been 9 years since Lehman Brothers failed and they're still following us 1.2523 0.05194 111 89 16 6
634 I wonder where they think we're going? 1.2523 0.05500 111 91 12 8
635 Arbiter chasers! 1.2523 0.04697 111 86 22 3
636 Just wait until they find out that they're not suited for this type of work. 1.2523 0.05034 111 88 18 5
637 All I know is, laying siege was a lot easier before the lawyers got involved. 1.2523 0.05194 111 89 16 6
638 Do you think they realize this isn't actually a lunch and learn? 1.2523 0.05194 111 89 16 6
639 The things I do to improve our brand. 1.2523 0.04697 111 86 22 3
640 How can we rape, pillage and plunder with all these ambulance chasers following us? 1.2523 0.05194 111 89 16 6
641 I thought YOU brought them. 1.2523 0.05194 111 89 16 6
642 It's just my opinion, but I don't think an army of CPAs is going to threaten the Visigoths. 1.2523 0.05647 111 92 10 9
643 We came, We saw, We lawyered up. 1.2523 0.05194 111 89 16 6
644 I sure miss the days of asking forgiveness instead of permission 1.2523 0.04697 111 86 22 3
645 I'm itching for a litigation. 1.2523 0.04868 111 87 20 4
646 Let's wait until we're closer before we mention the sacrifice part. 1.2523 0.04697 111 86 22 3
647 'Make Camelot great again,' he said. 1.2523 0.04697 111 86 22 3
648 Sooner or later they’ll figure out we don’t really have cookies. 1.2523 0.05034 111 88 18 5
649 I warned them not to litigate. 1.2523 0.05034 111 88 18 5
650 Does anyone else feel overdressed? 1.2523 0.05349 111 90 14 7
651 You know, lawyers make the best barbarians. 1.2500 0.04766 108 84 21 3
652 Wow, that "Lawyer on a Stick" really keeps them in line. 1.2500 0.05116 108 86 17 5
653 Nah, most of 'em found me on LinkedIn 1.2500 0.05116 108 86 17 5
654 We'll have the tactical advantage if this thing ends up going to arbitration. 1.2500 0.04766 108 84 21 3
655 The emperor is going to love his new credit score. 1.2500 0.05601 108 89 11 8
656 Well, you did tell them to suit up. 1.2476 0.05544 105 86 12 7
657 We're gonna hit them with shock and law. 1.2476 0.05203 105 84 16 5
658 Don't release the paperwork until you see the whites of their eyes. 1.2476 0.05376 105 85 14 6
659 I wonder if they know that the emperor only pays interns in "experience." 1.2453 0.05496 106 87 12 7
660 They don't look very fearsome now but wait until we enter the courthouse. 1.2453 0.05159 106 85 16 5
661 I think it was our new mission statement: 'Maximum Harm, Minimum Risk!' 1.2453 0.05330 106 86 14 6
662 So we won the war of words. What now? 1.2453 0.05159 106 85 16 5
663 Do you mind if I stop at the ATM? 1.2453 0.04798 106 83 20 3
664 "We first try this 'mergers and acquisitions' thing; then we pillage". 1.2453 0.05330 106 86 14 6
665 I'm telling you, lawyers pillage better than anyone. 1.2453 0.04982 106 84 18 4
666 We'll see if the pen is mightier than the sword when we come over that next ridge. 1.2453 0.04982 106 84 18 4
667 We'll bury them in red tape. 1.2453 0.04982 106 84 18 4
668 All I said was, we're headed for that white house over there... 1.2453 0.04607 106 82 22 2
669 Are you sure it's the right flash mob? 1.2453 0.04408 106 81 24 1
670 The advance unit builds the wall and we make the enemy pay for it. 1.2453 0.04982 106 84 18 4
671 Many say siege; I say sue. 1.2453 0.04798 106 83 20 3
672 We can still loot and pillage, but we need to sign non-disclosure agreements. 1.2453 0.05159 106 85 16 5
673 Apparently it's a war of words this time. 1.2453 0.04798 106 83 20 3
674 War is hell, but the lawsuits were killing us. 1.2453 0.05159 106 85 16 5
675 This is going to be one hell of a class action. 1.2453 0.04982 106 84 18 4
676 Once more unto the breach of contract... 1.2453 0.05496 106 87 12 7
677 Please stop promising to keep their resumes on file. 1.2453 0.05159 106 85 16 5
678 Remember: subpoena first, pillage second. 1.2453 0.04607 106 82 22 2
679 We file the briefs at dawn. 1.2451 0.05107 102 81 17 4
680 It's called branding. 1.2451 0.04501 102 78 23 1
681 You go right up the middle with the actuaries and I will do an end around with the accountants. 1.2451 0.05649 102 84 11 7
682 Here's the plan. Accountants in the front, doctors in the middle, and lawyers at the rear. When I yell "charge!" We'll bankrupt the enemy on the first day! 1.2451 0.05649 102 84 11 7
683 I'm calling this death march "The End of the Three Martini Lunch." 1.2451 0.05474 102 83 13 6
684 Now let's go get those tax returns. 1.2451 0.05474 102 83 13 6
685 Didn't you tell them about Casual Friday? 1.2451 0.05474 102 83 13 6
686 This mercenary army promised a brief battle. 1.2451 0.05294 102 82 15 5
687 I wonder what HR thought when I said that we need troops who know how to charge 1.2451 0.05107 102 81 17 4
688 It's not over until the paperwork is done. 1.2451 0.05107 102 81 17 4
689 I asked for a legion of Sioux. 1.2451 0.05294 102 82 15 5
690 Trust me, you never take "my kingdom for a horse" as a handshake deal 1.2427 0.05248 103 83 15 5
691 I know it's not quite as romantic as it used to be, but this is what modern warfare looks like. 1.2427 0.05063 103 82 17 4
692 How do we convince these guys we don't need life insurance 1.2427 0.05426 103 84 13 6
693 They're the knights who say "fee." 1.2427 0.05248 103 83 15 5
694 You go into battle with the army you have, not the one you wish for. 1.2427 0.05248 103 83 15 5
695 Junior partners are not entitled to a horse. 1.2427 0.05063 103 82 17 4
696 Then His Majesty's counsel called their counsel , and they replied - " Yeah... you and WHAT ARMY ?! 1.2427 0.05426 103 84 13 6
697 And if this threat of an audit fails? Then what? 1.2427 0.05248 103 83 15 5
698 How much more of that Kool-Aid do we have left? 1.2427 0.05599 103 85 11 7
699 Litigation is coming. 1.2427 0.04672 103 80 21 2
700 This is not the hostile takeover I had in mind... 1.2427 0.04672 103 80 21 2
701 Depositions are hell. 1.2427 0.04672 103 80 21 2
702 I could keep track of the sacking just fine, but there was no accounting for the pillaging. 1.2427 0.04871 103 81 19 3
703 What's a "motion to quash"? 1.2427 0.04672 103 80 21 2
704 The pied piper never had this following. 1.2427 0.04672 103 80 21 2
705 I said, break new reinforcements out of jail, not Yale. 1.2427 0.05063 103 82 17 4
706 Are they billing by the hour? 1.2427 0.04672 103 80 21 2
707 One look at us and they'll sue for peace. 1.2400 0.05341 100 81 14 5
708 These corporate takeovers are getting ridiculous... 1.2400 0.04948 100 79 18 3
709 I said sack... not briefcase. 1.2400 0.05707 100 83 10 7
710 We're great Khan artists, aren't we?! 1.2400 0.05707 100 83 10 7
711 Kinda takes the fun out of raping and pillaging when these guys just follow us around and represent our victims. 1.2400 0.05527 100 82 12 6
712 1,000 lawyers. Rome won't last a week. 1.2400 0.04740 100 78 20 2
713 Rape, pillage, recapitalize, repeat. 1.2400 0.04522 100 77 22 1
714 What do we do? I'll tell you what we do. We tell the Emperor that these ARE the Barbarians. Period. And for God's sake, do not mention Rotarians. The last thing we need is another plumber / plunder incident. 1.2400 0.04948 100 79 18 3
715 Flatulence chasers. 1.2400 0.04522 100 77 22 1
716 Wait till we attack them with our economic sanctions. 1.2400 0.05527 100 82 12 6
717 That's the last time I let Conan the Librarian train the troops. 1.2400 0.05707 100 83 10 7
718 Just my legal team? Ha! Have you seen them fight? They're vicious, heartless and never admit defeat. 1.2400 0.04948 100 79 18 3
719 This time, we'll show them we mean business. 1.2400 0.05527 100 82 12 6
720 Our enemies won't expect such a sneaky legal maneuver. 1.2400 0.05148 100 80 16 4
721 I liked it better when we could battle it out without all the lawyers 1.2400 0.05707 100 83 10 7
722 They haven’t fought yet, but they all took the on-line seminar 1.2400 0.05148 100 80 16 4
723 I just mentioned that there might be oil in the ground. 1.2400 0.05148 100 80 16 4
724 Trust me, we'll be able to bring any empire to their knees. 1.2400 0.04522 100 77 22 1
725 This time we are going to try to talk them into submission. 1.2400 0.04740 100 78 20 2
726 Apparently central casting misunderstood the term 'white walkers.' 1.2400 0.05707 100 83 10 7
727 So what's the plan if the negotiations fail? 1.2400 0.05341 100 81 14 5
728 Wait until the king sees all the 'hostile takeover' specialists we brought in. 1.2400 0.04740 100 78 20 2
729 I still say, it's not a "hostile takeover" without blood, rape, and pillage. 1.2400 0.05341 100 81 14 5
730 The last lot could fight, but this company plunders like no other 1.2400 0.04522 100 77 22 1
731 I've seen hostile corporate takeovers before but this is excessive. 1.2376 0.05477 101 83 12 6
732 Ever since we went public, we can't pillage like we used to. 1.2376 0.05293 101 82 14 5
733 Surely some of these captives will agree to work in the Trump Administration! 1.2376 0.05103 101 81 16 4
734 If we survive, I am to make partner. 1.2376 0.04699 101 79 20 2
735 All I know is they hired me to lead a work retreat. 1.2376 0.05103 101 81 16 4
736 Brace yourselves! Second quarter is coming. 1.2376 0.05293 101 82 14 5
737 The Pied Piper did the rats. We did the lawyers. No difference. 1.2376 0.04905 101 80 18 3
738 Our king's refusal to submit his tax returns is about to be resolved! 1.2376 0.04905 101 80 18 3
739 They say that in Europe it was a piper who used to do this. 1.2376 0.04699 101 79 20 2
740 He is a cunning enemy and I fear he may countersue. 1.2376 0.05827 101 85 8 8
741 We can always use them to sow chaos. 1.2376 0.04699 101 79 20 2
742 Getting revenge was lots more fun before lawyers. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
743 You really think Genghis is afraid of being audited? 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
744 . . . . And then you just had to say, 'Of course we can audit the plunder, Sire. . . .' 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
745 I hate these hostile takeovers. 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
746 That man with the moustache must feel pretty awkward right about now. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
747 They were really eager to join us in battle, once I explained Valhalla's universal healthcare coverage. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
748 They're best suited for battle. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
749 We gave them their marching orders. Now what? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
750 It's called a "corporate raid". 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
751 All I said was I was THINKING of getting a term insurance policy! 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
752 It's a simple concept, show them the approaching cost of litigation and they run like rabbits. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
753 Just a reminder, I was willing to settle out of court. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
754 Are you sure the White House ordered this many lawyers? 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
755 Let's hope they're open to negotiations. 1.2371 0.04582 97 75 21 1
756 At sunrise we storm the castle and open an H&R Block 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
757 Guess they weren't kidding when they said the new healthcare bill would be medieval... 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
758 This time will be different; this time, we paper them to death! 1.2347 0.04983 98 78 17 3
759 Hostile takeovers have really changed. 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
760 The trouble is, the only territory they have ever occupied is Wall Street! 1.2347 0.04983 98 78 17 3
761 I thought they were kidding about the army of lawyers. 1.2347 0.05389 98 80 13 5
762 They say an army marches on its billables. 1.2347 0.04767 98 77 19 2
763 I'm just saying that we have differing views of risk management. 1.2347 0.04983 98 78 17 3
764 Do you think he meant "corporate" raiders? 1.2347 0.04767 98 77 19 2
765 What's the second thing we do after killing all the lawyers? 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
766 Accountants vincit omnia! 1.2347 0.04541 98 76 21 1
767 When do you think they'll realize our startup is BS? 1.2347 0.05580 98 81 11 6
768 We will habeas the hell out of their corpus! 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
769 Oh, and remind me to get my battle cry approved by Compliance 1.2347 0.04983 98 78 17 3
770 I wish they had downsized legal rather than operations. 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
771 I really don't think that this new strategy of "suing the enemy" will be as effective as pillaging and plundering. 1.2347 0.05389 98 80 13 5
772 I see the ocean up ahead. At least this will be a good start. 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
773 Pick up the pace. The cliff's still twenty miles away. 1.2347 0.05766 98 82 9 7
774 Which Trump hotel are we looking for? 1.2347 0.05580 98 81 11 6
775 Just let the tax guys do the pillaging. 1.2316 0.05065 95 76 16 3
776 "If I have to escort these bozos to one more sales meeting,I'm joining the Crusades". 1.2316 0.05065 95 76 16 3
777 They call us barbarians. Wait ’til they see our legal team. 1.2316 0.05281 95 77 14 4
778 If they thought the elephants were bad, wait until they see this! 1.2316 0.04838 95 75 18 2
779 Want to bet we get there and the Wi-Fi's down? 1.2316 0.05281 95 77 14 4
780 Plundering isn't as much fun since we got funded. 1.2292 0.05635 96 80 10 6
781 What do we do when we get there? 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
782 This is the most corporate Pride parade I've ever been in. 1.2292 0.05635 96 80 10 6
783 Before killing them all, we have to round them up. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
784 Life insurance--resistance is futile. 1.2292 0.05826 96 81 8 7
785 I've been told it's important to plan for the occupation. 1.2292 0.05826 96 81 8 7
786 I believe that Thrune the Mighty said a legion that's accountable 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
787 They're really getting creative with these corporate retreats. 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
788 Who would have thought our raiding skills would be applicable in business? 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
789 We have the lawyers. 1.2292 0.05826 96 81 8 7
790 Not exactly what I was expecting when Attila told me I'd be leading a company. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
791 I'm sorry, but I just don't get the same old thrill from a surprise audit. 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
792 Mercenaries! 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
793 So this is what the CEO meant by keeping our people in line? 1.2292 0.05635 96 80 10 6
794 I don't see what you're so worried about. Nobody sued Attila the Hun. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
795 I knew you didn't pay taxes on that thing! 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
796 Litigation is coming. 1.2292 0.04559 96 75 20 1
797 I remember -- before the accountants and lawyers -- when invading a country was so simple. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
798 And when we finish litigating we'll have our way with their women. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
799 They've been following us since Cleveland. I thought you knew why. 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
800 This will forever be known as the War of Words. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
801 I don't mind telling you, hearing people scream "Here comes Mongol Horde, LLC!" just sucks the joy out of it for me. I am going to retire as soon as I am fully vested. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
802 I still think that was a typo, why would the gods want 10,000 Virgils? 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
803 Hostile takeovers used to be fun. 1.2292 0.05635 96 80 10 6
804 It was Risk Management's idea. 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
805 Now we can legally storm the gates. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
806 Yeah, but they work on contingency. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
807 I know they don't look the part, but Thor says bankers make the best plunderers. 1.2283 0.05804 92 77 9 6
808 Pillaging just hasn’t been the same since Legal got involved. 1.2283 0.04663 92 72 19 1
809 Call someone in Continuity. 1.2283 0.04400 92 71 21 0
810 First we surround the enemy, then they bore them to death. 1.2283 0.05150 92 74 15 3
811 Whatever you do, don't stop short or we'll have a 100 whiplash cases to deal with. 1.2283 0.05377 92 75 13 4
812 I bought one hair brush two years ago and now they won't leave me alone. 1.2283 0.05804 92 77 9 6
813 See the ashes of his underwriters, and hear the wailing of his legal department! 1.2283 0.05150 92 74 15 3
814 This isn't the type of crusade I had in mind. 1.2283 0.04913 92 73 17 2
815 "I love the smell of attache cases in the morning"! 1.2283 0.05595 92 76 11 5
816 We can't afford to let this one drag on. 1.2283 0.05150 92 74 15 3
817 They don't have a chance. We'll bury 'em in paperwork. 1.2283 0.04913 92 73 17 2
818 Tell me again what a lawyer does. 1.2283 0.05377 92 75 13 4
819 A round of "The Ants Go Marching Two by Two" could improve the pace. 1.2283 0.05595 92 76 11 5
820 Lord Drago said there was no accounting for what we're about to do. I say let's prove him wrong. 1.2283 0.04913 92 73 17 2
821 Feels like just yesterday that *we* were summer interns 1.2283 0.05804 92 77 9 6
822 Trust me, Octavius. The old bricks and mortar model is dead. 1.2283 0.05377 92 75 13 4
823 No, that was Tchaikovsky; this is Bizet! 1.2283 0.05804 92 77 9 6
824 Let me get this straight. Your plan is to threaten to tie them up in court? 1.2283 0.05150 92 74 15 3
825 These MBA boot camps are a royal pain. 1.2258 0.05100 93 75 15 3
826 We're going to litigate them back to the Stone Age. 1.2258 0.04619 93 73 19 1
827 "I told you not to file that Workman's Compensation claim". 1.2258 0.04866 93 74 17 2
828 ...I forgot to call the caterer. 1.2258 0.05540 93 77 11 5
829 It's true that they have heavier weapons, but we can tie them up with paperwork. 1.2258 0.05325 93 76 13 4
830 I worry that we have become too litigious 1.2258 0.05100 93 75 15 3
831 You know they'll all break and run when the first Louis Vuitton shield gets nicked, right? 1.2258 0.05540 93 77 11 5
832 You go to war with the army you have -- not the army you might want or wish to have at a later time. 1.2258 0.05100 93 75 15 3
833 When this is over, we need to talk. 1.2258 0.05325 93 76 13 4
834 Another round of 100,000 bottles of beer on the wall? 1.2258 0.05540 93 77 11 5
835 Say what you want, my money is on the sword 1.2258 0.04866 93 74 17 2
836 I tell ya Lars, I never thought I would live to see the day when a group of lawyers were scarier than a raiding party of Vikings... 1.2258 0.05540 93 77 11 5
837 First we pillage, then we litigate! 1.2258 0.04866 93 74 17 2
838 We'll defeat our enemies with overwhelming logic and misdireacttion. 1.2258 0.05100 93 75 15 3
839 'Litigate to militate' is my battle-cry. 1.2222 0.05423 90 74 12 4
840 white man in a suit. world's deadliest weapon 1.2222 0.05648 90 75 10 5
841 Exoduses aren't what they used to be. 1.2222 0.05188 90 73 14 3
842 Are you sure he said an army of accountants? 1.2222 0.05648 90 75 10 5
843 I can never remember. Is it 10,000 powers of attorney or 10,000 power of attorneys? 1.2222 0.05423 90 74 12 4
844 What happened to first kill all the lawyers? 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
845 In my opinion, the laws of armed conflict have become overly complex... 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
846 Trust me, the Visigoths will have also lawyered up by now." 1.2222 0.05188 90 73 14 3
847 You'll see. In time, all hostile takeovers will happen like this. 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
848 Let's make this audit painful. 1.2222 0.05423 90 74 12 4
849 I think we should make a rest stop. These guys want to do their business 1.2222 0.04682 90 71 18 1
850 Do you ever get the feeling we're being followed? 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
851 With all our booty, we should have known the auditors would catch up with us. 1.2222 0.05188 90 73 14 3
852 This'll be the mother of all hostile takeovers! 1.2206 0.06231 68 56 9 3
853 First we kill all their lawyers. 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
854 Sir, are you sure they're suited for battle? 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
855 The informant said the guy in the suit carrying a briefcase was Spartacus 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
856 I said we needed earls and barons and counts. Counts! 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
857 I think we're being followed 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
858 Promise me you will never wear that perfume again . 1.2198 0.05806 91 77 8 6
859 I came, I saw, I negotiated. 1.2198 0.05591 91 76 10 5
860 Welcome to Corporate America! 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
861 I said "maraud it" not "audit", you idiot. 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
862 Audit is the new plunder. 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
863 Change that sign to read- Attila et all. 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
864 We do 401k matching, but it's not so bad when you realize how few of them make it to retirement 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
865 J. Crewsades 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
866 I meant suits of armor. 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
867 Okay, then here's another one: Shareholder Value or Death! 1.2198 0.04636 91 72 18 1
868 When I audit . . . 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
869 Remember when our crusades meant something? Now I think we're just going through the motions. 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
870 Are you sure he said "a thousand more suits on the ground?" 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
871 What did the general mean by "make haste, we are being charged by the hour"? 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
872 I always forget how much paperwork war is. 1.2198 0.04893 91 73 16 2
873 I really don't think he literally meant an army of lawyers. 1.2198 0.05591 91 76 10 5
874 The cliff is just ahead. 1.2198 0.05591 91 76 10 5
875 Never pillage without your legal team. 1.2198 0.05806 91 77 8 6
876 Let's kick it up to a cantor; they're billing us by the hour. 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
877 Don't sweat it. We'll bury them with paperwork. 1.2198 0.04893 91 73 16 2
878 Just in case it's a tie... 1.2184 0.04746 87 69 17 1
879 Are you sure you told the King "Lethal Battle"? 1.2184 0.05279 87 71 13 3
880 I don't see why we have to escort them to Capital Hill. 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
881 You're sure the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
882 Look - I don't like it either but we're legit now. 1.2184 0.05279 87 71 13 3
883 Remember this, son, before you go into battle, you lawyer up. 1.2184 0.05763 87 73 9 5
884 Attila the Hun! Now, there was a guy who put the hostile in hostile takeovers. 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
885 I told headquarters we needed archers, but they sent auditors instead. 1.2184 0.05763 87 73 9 5
886 I love the smell of lawyers in the morning. 1.2184 0.05763 87 73 9 5
887 We usually lose the first battle, but we always win the appeal. 1.2184 0.05279 87 71 13 3
888 Are you sure this is the best way to attack Goldman-Sachs 1.2184 0.05019 87 70 15 2
889 I especially hate cocktail hour. 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
890 I hope we brought enough water coolers. 1.2179 0.05954 78 65 9 4
891 Hostile takeovers sure ain't what they used to be. 1.2159 0.05469 88 73 11 4
892 I liked raiding better before we went corporate. 1.2159 0.05469 88 73 11 4
893 We're doomed. I hear the other army uses Turbotax. 1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
894 It's the new gig economy. 1.2159 0.05225 88 72 13 3
895 That's the last time we pillage at Brooks Brothers. 1.2159 0.05225 88 72 13 3
896 I told them that it was a 9 to 5 work day with full health insurance. 1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
897 You'd be amazed how much more booty we get this way. 1.2159 0.05469 88 73 11 4
898 Did we get enough to defend Trump? 1.2159 0.05469 88 73 11 4
899 We've come to rape, conquer, and examine their banks. 1.2159 0.05225 88 72 13 3
900 I still don't think this is what he meant by "depose the enemy." 1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
901 You should have never mentioned we were uninsured. 1.2159 0.04411 88 69 19 0
902 Can you believe it? All I did was tell them we were headed to the land of LinkedIn. 1.2159 0.05703 88 74 9 5
903 The King said he wants to be lied to by experts. 1.2159 0.05225 88 72 13 3
904 This will be a hell of a charge. 1.2121 0.07002 66 57 4 5
905 They'll never expect our Trojan Class-Action Lawsuit 1.2118 0.05047 85 69 14 2
906 They're not just raiders. They're corporate raiders. 1.2118 0.04762 85 68 16 1
907 Tort reform! That's all I'm saying. 1.2118 0.05575 85 71 10 4
908 I want a suit and briefcase too 1.2118 0.05317 85 70 12 3
909 There is discovery, pre-trial motions, subpoenas, witness questioning, jury selection... and then we get to the slaying and smoting 1.2118 0.05047 85 69 14 2
910 Our subpoenas will block out the sun! 1.2118 0.05575 85 71 10 4
911 I miss the days when a hostile takeover didn't require a phalanx of lawyers. 1.2118 0.05047 85 69 14 2
912 Their ad said "hired guns." 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
913 I asked headquarters for gladiators, not glad auditors. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
914 I miss the days when we could do a good pillage without having to lawyer up. 1.2093 0.05758 86 73 8 5
915 They may be an army of lawyers, but don't let that fool you. Those briefcases are full of swords, knives and instruments of torture. 1.2093 0.05758 86 73 8 5
916 That piper in Hamlin's got nothin' on me. 1.2093 0.04712 86 69 16 1
917 Apparently, it's a different kind of hostile takeover than we're used to. 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
918 Hurry, the special investigators are gaining on us. 1.2093 0.05758 86 73 8 5
919 I don't care what you say, you can't sue Gengus Kahn. 1.2093 0.05515 86 72 10 4
920 So I see to the mayor, "Give me two million and I'll rid your city of lawyers. Works every time. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
921 Not sure what it is. All I know for sure is it atracts Republicans. 1.2093 0.05515 86 72 10 4
922 Honestly, it takes an army of lawyers to be a conqueror now. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
923 No need for whips, just whisper the words restructuring or downturn and they'll do just about anything. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
924 Civilized conflict resolution sucks! 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
925 April 15 is coming. 1.2093 0.04412 86 68 18 0
926 There's just something unsettling about the whole thing...I mean, what's in the briefcases? 1.2093 0.05990 86 74 6 6
927 If that thing about the pen being mightier than the sword is true, we're seriously kicking some ass. 1.2093 0.05758 86 73 8 5
928 We call it Game of Clones. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
929 I'm so tired of these corporate takeovers. 1.2093 0.04712 86 69 16 1
930 Were you into raping and pillaging before you got into auditing? 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
931 I still say the king wanted all the best REGAL advisers we could find. 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
932 First, we strike terror into their hearts. 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
933 I really think our future is behind us! 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
934 Why bring a lawyer when you can bring an army of them? 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
935 Apparently we only pay them if we win. 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
936 Let's see them try to sue for peace now! 1.2093 0.05515 86 72 10 4
937 I clearly told personnel I needed a hundred marauders not auditors. 1.2093 0.05515 86 72 10 4
938 Because the Visgoths had scruples, that's why! 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
939 This is the last time I discuss wardrobe with you 1.2093 0.05758 86 73 8 5
940 I long for the days when hostile takeovers didn't require an army of lawyers 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
941 Corporate raiding just doesn't feel the same ... 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
942 They move faster on Casual Friday. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
943 I just asked, 'Who wants to work remotely?' 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
944 I was told they are all armed with a new weapon that is supposedly mightier than the sword. 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
945 When they said John Waters was directing, I said what the hell. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
946 Remember, on my signal, initiate a class-action on their left flank! 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
947 They're supposed to pick up after the horses. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
948 Your turn to pick a cause for these nitwits to support! 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
949 It never ends, more plunder more bean counters 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
950 I still think Genghis's way was more interesting 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
951 Jousting at court ain't what it used to be. 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
952 I doubt he meant 'an army of lawyers' literally. 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
953 Dragons are easier to feed, but lawyers are more deadly. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
954 Death marches build trust. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
955 K-a-h-n men. Not c-o-n men. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
956 When we meet the enemy, we'll see if the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
957 The kingdoms of our enemies will crumble when infected with our economists. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
958 Well, lead and the meek shall follow 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
959 The names Fitzgerald, Cohen, and Rappaport will be feared throughout the land. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
960 Our legal dream team insures we can rape, pillage and kill with impunity. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
961 I hope they're mostly Christian, because the lions are picky. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
962 Tell the troops that whoever captures the enemy prince will make partner. 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
963 Only one more mile to cubicle city 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
964 At least we won't get to the gate looking like barbarians. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
965 Trust me, my ROI for the average pillage and plunder has gone through the roof since I hooked up with these guys. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
966 I swear I was told to wear "business casual." 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
967 Khan said recruit to pillage and loot, so we got us some real scorched-earth sociopaths: sub-prime lenders, payday lenders, corporate raiders, student loan collectors... 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
968 Takeovers sure aren't like they used to be. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
969 They look docile now but they are barbarians at the gates. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
970 They sure don't make mercenaries like they used to. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
971 I never should have Lawyered up. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
972 When they swarm, they're more destructive than the locusts. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
973 In our day, we would never walk directly behind horses. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
974 The new king believes pens are mightier than swords. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
975 I know he wants to be lawyered up, but jeez . . . 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
976 Uh oh. My horses stomach is making rumbling noises. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
977 Rather embarrassing we captured so few. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
978 I should NEVER have said 'The pen is mightier than the sword.' We are so screwed. 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
979 I promised them 33% of anything they can seize or confiscate. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
980 First we'll fix health care, then we move on to tax reform. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
981 I told you not to shoot down that big bird. Now what do we do with all these prisoners? 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
982 Now that we've put the legal stuff behind us... 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
983 Just say ‘halt’ if you want to see a game of human corporate dominoes. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
984 Any of these damn immigrants think they're gonna take my job, they've got another think coming. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
985 For every man of ours they slay, we’ll bring 10 cases of wrongful death 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
986 I didn't think this was what they meant by 'an army of lawyers'. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
987 I got a feeling these are not our guys. 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
988 We found them wandering around the desert. They call themselves 'The People of the Books'. 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
989 Pillaging just isn't what it used to be. 1.2073 0.04504 82 65 17 0
990 War has lost its appeal. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
991 Yes, I'm on my way to an IRS audit. How could you tell? 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
992 I suppose, if I am being honest, that a thousand pens is probably mightier than one sword. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
993 They need water and Wi-Fi. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
994 I'm telling you, arbitrage, it's the wave of the future! 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
995 I like that they're stepping in it every so often. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
996 The March of the Condemned Accountants 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
997 They take the fun out of plundering. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
998 When he told us to go get lawyers, guns, and money, why couldn't you have found the guns or the money? 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
999 So I heard the King saying, The best offense is a good defense. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
1000 I was told we need to "give them the business." 1.2073 0.04504 82 65 17 0
1001 They're here to ensure I don't sign no stinkin' Magna Carta. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1002 It's mostly a Norman invasion, but we've sprinkled in a few Eugenes and Arnold's for variety. 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
1003 First the snakes, now the lawyers. What will Patrick think of next? 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
1004 Ever worry about Western influences? 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
1005 All in all, raping and pillaging with lawyers just isn't the same. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
1006 Do you think this is what the king meant by 'hostile takeover'? 1.2073 0.04504 82 65 17 0
1007 It's a new world. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
1008 Tax men? I distinctly heard "100 axe men." 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
1009 When we get a look at their books, it's all over. 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
1010 I have a gut feeling that something is wrong. These capitalist tribes surrendered too easily. 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
1011 Nobody messes with Morelock, Gunderson, Fishbein and Hemple. Nobody. 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
1012 I selected these men because each one has an MBA. I want to make certain that the enemy understands that we mean business. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
1013 Is this your first corporate retreat? 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1014 When he said to bring "military attaches" he was referring to a job title, not a briefcase. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1015 Trust me, these guys come highly recommended and specialize in hostile takeovers. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
1016 We don't plunder, we litigate. 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
1017 I remember when the Pride parade was a lot less corporate. ... 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
1018 When they told me I'd been picked to lead a legal crusade... 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
1019 I swear that this is my last Crusade. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
1020 This army is all plea and no pillage. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1021 We will sue them into submission 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
1022 On the bright side, we'll be ready to file an appeal. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1023 Their "army of doctors" will be no match for us. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
1024 "Better than the Children's Crusade," he said. "It'll be great," he said. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
1025 I never go into battle without my legal team. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
1026 It’s almost too easy now, isn’t it? 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1027 And so began the Age of the Hostile Takeover. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1028 I said "Golden Horde," not "Goldman Horde." 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
1029 Call me old-fashioned, but "We will win the day or choke their rivers with affidavits and depositions" just doesn't have the same oomph. 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
1030 I really thought that 'an army of lawyers' was just a figure of speech. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1031 Let's hope that pen and sword thing is right. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
1032 I said bring a suit. 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
1033 When they see we're an army of aggressive life insurance agents they'll give up and run. 1.2073 0.05945 82 70 7 5
1034 The first wave of auditors will surround the city at sunrise. Then the actuaries will approach from the hinterlands with underwriting agreements. 1.2048 0.05878 83 71 7 5
1035 They really know how to follow suit. 1.2048 0.05623 83 70 9 4
1036 I feel like corporate's been breathing down my neck lately. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
1037 Geneva convention says we must give them water. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
1038 Into the valley of death litigated the 600 hundred. 1.2048 0.04775 83 67 15 1
1039 We devastate, pillage and plunder. But at least we bring our own insurance adjusters. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
1040 Damn IRS audit. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
1041 We're going to bury them in paperwork 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
1042 The archers failed. The calvary and the Janissaries failed. Now it is all up to the accountants. 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
1043 So what's our plan if this "cease and desist" thing doesn't work out? 1.2048 0.04457 83 66 17 0
1044 We really need to talk to our recruiters, Oleg. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
1045 I knew this would happen when we accepted that V.C. investment. 1.2048 0.04775 83 67 15 1
1046 You have to wonder what they use their right hands for. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
1047 These are the ones that barbecued their briefcases a week ago. 1.2048 0.05878 83 71 7 5
1048 ..and they can help us plan for retirement, too.. 1.2048 0.04775 83 67 15 1
1049 ok, first we fill the moat with subpoenas.... 1.2048 0.04775 83 67 15 1
1050 You think this might be about our raping and pillaging incident? 1.2048 0.05623 83 70 9 4
1051 I distinctly asked for suits of grey armor not grey flannel. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
1052 These team building exercises are getting out of control. 1.2048 0.05878 83 71 7 5
1053 I don't know. Judy from HR just told me to march the accounting department to Hastings. 1.2048 0.06123 83 72 5 6
1054 We've got a good bunch of recruits, but the best young vandals in the Ivy League still go straight to Wall Street. 1.2048 0.04457 83 66 17 0
1055 They're here to help us reach a settlement. 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
1056 Did you make sure their pencils were sharp? 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
1057 Methinks His Majesty is overly concerned with liability. 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
1058 Don't look back, it will only encourage them. 1.2000 0.06006 80 69 6 5
1059 Attorneys, always more attorneys. I liked it better when we could simply pillage and plunder. 1.2000 0.06006 80 69 6 5
1060 I said we were going to liquidate, not litigate ! 1.1970 0.06190 66 56 7 3
1061 The Saxons have no clue how barbaric we can be. 1.1948 0.05558 77 65 9 3
1062 Now remember,...we're only trying to force a settlement! 1.1948 0.04543 77 62 15 0
1063 Our legal team will keep them tied up for years. 1.1948 0.04905 77 63 13 1
1064 I get the feeling they signed up for the wrong 'Leadership Training'. 1.1948 0.05242 77 64 11 2
1065 I believe in the accountability of our military budget, but this is ridiculous! 1.1948 0.05242 77 64 11 2
1066 You'd think an army of lawyers would have transportation 1.1948 0.05857 77 66 7 4
1067 If their algorithm is correct, we shall win this battle. 1.1948 0.04543 77 62 15 0
1068 This is Plan B. Shock and Awe didn't work. 1.1935 0.05557 62 51 10 1
1069 Sarge, you have one month to turn this batch of maggots into Berserkers. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1070 If you ask me, They're taking this "Barbarians at the gate" thing a little too seriously. 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1071 But will they continue to follow us when they find out we're women? 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1072 I miss the old days before detente when we could maim and ravage. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1073 We're trying a new temp agency. Don't ask. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1074 You know, when I said I wanted to be a corporate raider, this is not what meant... 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1075 Business as usual? 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1076 Their strength is questionable, but their manner of fighting for money is legendary. 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1077 Then I told him - look, I've got an army of lawyers. 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1078 So sue me! 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1079 Hostile takeover. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1080 So instead of beware the slaughtering hordes it's beware the auditing boards? 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1081 Noah will have a difficult time picking two. 1.1923 0.06068 78 68 5 5
1082 I hate working at Medieval Times when the personal injury lawyer convention is in town. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1083 The crusades as a tax write-off? Brilliant but flawed. 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1084 They have their drones. Now we have ours. 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1085 Sure our benefits got better, but I just miss the pillaging. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1086 Maybe we can sue them into submission... 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1087 We really should've talked him out of writing that stupid war book 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1088 The takeover was less hostile than I had anticipated. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1089 They're working on a few of my paternity suits. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1090 I smell victory, they're not expecting a surprise audit! 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1091 This is war without mercy I tell you. 1.1923 0.04491 78 63 15 0
1092 I'm telling you, we should have made a left at the Shell station 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1093 Is that a Starbucks up ahead? 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1094 . . . because the subpoena is mightier than the sword! 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1095 They're not so tough without their poison pills and golden parachutes. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1096 I've always dreamed about leading an army of lawyers into battle. 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1097 There's protection - then there's "Protection". 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1098 He has gotta stop this tweeting! 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1099 It's the first "class action" crusade. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1100 They say they missed their train. What's a "train?" 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1101 The new emperor wants us to focus on mergers and acquisitions. 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1102 Pillaging was more fun without the paperwork. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1103 We'll see how great their Great Wall is when we slap this injunction on them. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1104 Dunno....I heard they are carrying the King's tax return 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1105 If you capture them young, they can be trained. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1106 I realize we need to be careful, but we're lawyering this thing to death. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1107 If eminent domain fails, we’ll bore the masses into submission. 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1108 I learned this from Sun Tzu's 'The Art of Risk Management.' 1.1923 0.04491 78 63 15 0
1109 Are they still there? 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1110 I wouldn't call it exciting, but mergers and acquisitions is steady work. 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1111 All their suits are the same, but their underarmour is colorfully individualized. 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1112 Looks like our podcast on “How to Pillage” created a following. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1113 They're sure we'll need to secure clear title to this Grail thing. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1114 This will show them we mean business! 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1115 Do you get the feeling we're being followed? 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1116 When I said let's get down to business, I didn't think they would take it literally. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1117 You sure we got enough General Tso's spicey chicken to feed them all? 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1118 When we yell, 'Charge!' are they just going to start billing us by the hour? 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1119 Make sure we have them back by April 15th 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1120 We will sue for peace. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1121 Damn the negotiators. I say we fight. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1122 Truly there's no defense against an army of lawyers. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1123 At least our accounting books are up to date. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1124 Were you able to make a reservation for us? 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1125 I didn't think they'll take the command, "Suit up!" so literally... 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1126 This time our hostile takeover won't be stopped by an injunction. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
1127 We may not win this battle, but we'll clean up suing over our personal injuries. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
1128 This time we don't lose on a technicality 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1129 Ever since I finished business school my approach to hostile takeovers has changed. 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
1130 I just don't understand why we're not getting more women to apply. 1.1923 0.05787 78 67 7 4
1131 This is what I call an office retreat. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
1132 So your plan then, Guilford, is to bore the infidels into submission?' 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
1133 It's gotten so that a Vandal just can't have some spontaneous fun anymore 1.1905 0.05476 63 52 10 1
1134 All of this pillaging creates a mountain of paperwork. 1.1905 0.05925 63 53 8 2
1135 I am so sick of these corporate retreats. 1.1892 0.05667 74 63 8 3
1136 For the moment, they still think this is an investment trip. 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
1137 Leif, do you really think the threat of a tax audit will cause them to lay down their arms? 1.1892 0.05667 74 63 8 3
1138 There's just no fun in conquering villages of 'Yes' men. 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
1139 Before this I thought “army of lawyers” was just an expression. 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
1140 They out-lawyer us five to one so it comes down to the element of surprise. 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
1141 Rule of law, he said. We'll see. 1.1892 0.05667 74 63 8 3
1142 The legal department has taken all the fun out of pillaging. 1.1892 0.04584 74 60 14 0
1143 Something needs to be done about this migrant accountant crisis. 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
1144 'Hard to believe we're all extras on the same film. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1145 Well, now it’s Khan & Son and Associates. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1146 This isn't what I had in mind when you proposed a Norman conquest. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1147 We're only equipped for a brief encounter. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1148 Party in the front, business in the back. That's why they're the infantry. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1149 Now this is what you call ruthless conquest 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1150 I just wish we thought through conquering the middle class. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1151 Actuarians at the Gate. 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1152 No more corporate takeovers. 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1153 Then he appointed me attorney general. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1154 These days you can't have too many lawyers. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1155 I miss when we had squires. 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1156 Sometimes I feel like their hearts aren't in it. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1157 The king wants to hold these terrorists accountable. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1158 Trump sent us to renegotiate. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1159 I knew if we had enough lawyers we could settle this without another war. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1160 We no longer 'rape' and 'pillage.' Henceforth, we 'covfefe.' 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1161 Did you remember to have them surrender their calculators? 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1162 I did not request an army to "bore" the enemy. I'm sure I said "gore". 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1163 I used to think these guys had no imagination, but here we are. 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1164 So how many personal injury lawyers did you hire? 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1165 First we soften them up with discovery then we bomb them with subpoenas and finish them off with lawsuits. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1166 Relax, no matter what happens, we've got an army of lawyers behind us. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1167 If they think this application process is tough, they can forget about Goldman Sachs. 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
1168 Trust me, nothing strikes fear in the hearts of your enemies like lawyers. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1169 The future of barbarism ain't what it used to be 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1170 Wow! These yes men were an easy plunder 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1171 They're going to know we mean business. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1172 We came, we saw, we audited. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1173 I don't fear a poison pill. It's the boiling oil that keeps me up at night. And the archers. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1174 All I know is that the executive order said "get rid of the regulators" 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1175 Why do we need five bureaucrats for every soldier? 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1176 If we do find the Grail, we'll need all the lawyers we can get. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1177 I remember when collecting taxes for the king was less boring. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1178 Wanted: 'SOLDIERS' of Fortune, not 'readers.' Next time, let me place the ad. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1179 Remember when we had commuter trains. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1180 And I always thought that "army of lawyers" was just a phrase. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1181 We're trying a new type of hostile takeover. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1182 ...and so I asked myself- where can I get a horde of villains, thugs, and cut-throats? The ABA, of course! 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1183 Where is this Great Wall of Street, again? 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1184 And I still say he said “bring an army AND the lawyers.” 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1185 Hostile takeovers just aren't' what they used to be. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1186 Mandatory Medieval Monday Meeting 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1187 Why do they keep asking how far it is to the next swamp? 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1188 ...and if we win they pay our attorney fees. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1189 In the good old days, we had to shackle the slaves. Now they just fall into line. 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
1190 Remember, pillage and plunder, and then litigation. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1191 Bet you weren't expecting this from a craigslist add that asked for 'herding experience' 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1192 I figure 3 subpoenas, 5 affidavits, and motion to dismiss will leave them right where we want them! 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1193 I meant the OTHER kind of hostile takeover! 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1194 They call me 'Lawrence of Oilrabia'. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1195 Nothing beats an army of yes men if you want to rule the world. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1196 Trust me. They will surrender before getting audited. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1197 Did you say something about a hostile takeover? 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1198 It hasn't been the same since His Majesty declared war against mainstream media. 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1199 I'll let the money follow me this time. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1200 Audit is coming. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1201 Don't look now, but I think we're being monitored by the IRS. 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
1202 I bet the other Amazon box has the Whole Foods stuff. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1203 They may not look dangerous, but they are ruthless negotiators! 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1204 They may not look formidable-- but I've seen this army of lawyers decimate a corporate empire 1.1867 0.06208 75 66 4 5
1205 These suits are made for walkin' and that's just what they'll do. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1206 They claim they can build pyramids faster than Egyptian slaves, but I think it's a scheme. 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
1207 But will they fight by the hour? 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1208 New plan -- we're going to charge the castle with an astronomical billable rate. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1209 You know, back in the day we used to just CONQUER. Nowadays...EVERYBODY has an attorney! 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1210 This will become known as "the king's defense" hundred's of years from now. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1211 Yes, we need a lance - but did you have to bring the ambulance? 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
1212 Over-regulation has taken all the spontaneity out of raping and pillaging. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1213 He’s going to regret that injunction. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1214 Never been so ready if we sue for peace. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1215 I know "Atilla the Litigator" doesn't roll off the tongue as nicely but I promise you it's the direction this business of raping and pillaging is going. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1216 But Jim, I said we needed an actual army, not an army of actuaries. 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1217 Just remember we're knights of the conference table. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1218 Did you remember to stock the castle with LaCroix? 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1219 I hope this is what they meant by a "show of strength from our sales force" 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1220 Supposedly, we’ll quash the rebellion with shock-and-awe litigation. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1221 You know a conference call would have worked just as well. 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
1222 It's the billable hours that really kills them. 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1223 I remember the good old days when you could rape and pillage without hiring an army of lawyers. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1224 Remember the good ole days when we settled our disputes with swords and spears? 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1225 I'm telling you Erik, you can never be too lawyered up. 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1226 Are you sure this is the right line? 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1227 Sure they are tough. I bet half of them are packing a letter opener. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1228 Yeah, but what happens AFTER the element of surprise? 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1229 Well at least tomorrow is Friday. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1230 Why can't our best lawyer just fight their best lawyer? 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1231 Maybe we should change it to 'Knights of the Long Table. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1232 I told you this would happen if they reinstated the draft! 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1233 The I.R.S. better listen to what I have to say this time. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1234 We should have stopped in Greenland 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
1235 I think my wife is seeing another man. 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1236 Why do we offer corporate retreats again?? 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1237 we should have specified for a swift campaign not for a brief campaign 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1238 Winter is coming. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
1239 Feeding an army is bad enough, but the billable hours are just killing us. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
1240 Onward business soldiers 1.1867 0.04530 75 61 14 0
1241 We'll have to pillage at least five more villages to pay their bill. 1.1867 0.05910 75 65 6 4
1242 Have you done the math on the billable hours? 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
1243 Now we'll have the advantage during the peace treaty negotiations. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1244 I like the new dress code. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1245 Suits on the ground is the only way to fight leadership. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1246 Keep it coming,boys.We'll shred EVERTHING at the end. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1247 J. Crewsades 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1248 I said suits of armor! Not Armani! 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1249 So, just how will we explain this to Ghengis Khan? 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1250 Do you feel comfortable with our weapon of choice? 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1251 It's unclear which one of them has the envelope for best picture. They said they’d just work it out with the presenters on stage. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1252 Saddle up, Lawyer up. Who knew? I barely speak their language 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1253 I was advised to lawyer up before testifying. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
1254 The king said to sue for peace. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1255 What do you call 10,000 lawyers in Outer Mongolia? 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1256 Do you still think a class action was the right strategy? 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1257 I remember the good old days when you could have a good joust without an army of lawyers. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
1258 Well their gates are impenetrable, but I'll be damned if their 'No Soliciting' sign stays up any longer. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1259 Lawyers make the best galley slaves. The hours are the same. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1260 You failed to mention that this was a corporate raid. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1261 They may take away our lives, but they'll never take our pension funds! 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1262 You were right. We have them believing that we will make America great again. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1263 I think we need more legal ammunition. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1264 Whilst they do the Hun's taxes. We'll pillage the castle. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1265 I'm really getting bored with these hostile takeovers. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1266 There are more horses' asses than there are horses! 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1267 I warned them we'd hold them to account! 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1268 Nothing strikes terror in the hearts of politicians like a horde of lawyers. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1269 I understand, but this is what the Trump protocol required. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1270 Once they see our legal team, they'll settle! 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1271 So much for casual Friday. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1272 Nothing more terrifying than a tax audit. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1273 How can I distinguish my 2997 followers from bots? 1.1831 0.06121 71 62 5 4
1274 Escape the corporate world you said; work for ourselves you said. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1275 Pharaoh constructs the Great Pyramid Scheme. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
1276 Our army means business. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1277 I know I was the bad guy on the last raid, but something about this batch makes me want to be the bad guy again. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1278 ...a good start! 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1279 It's only smart to lawyer up. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1280 When we began these crusades, I never thought our battle cry would end up being "See you in court.' 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1281 I can't believe we are the only ones that actually participated in "Mongolian Warlord Fridays" at this office! 1.1831 0.06121 71 62 5 4
1282 If you can't conquer 'em, sue 'em! 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1283 I do hope you're right that the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1284 The " Ghengis Kahn" executive training is our biggest moneymaker. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1285 Remember , Moses, the pied piper, all had a similar beginning. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1286 I know, I know, but Attila swears they will wreak terror. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1287 Explain to me again how a mercenary can work for a contingent fee? 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1288 I still say body cameras would be easier... 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1289 God only knows what they were doing in the desert but I heard an Amalakite at the gym tell his buddy that what these guys were able to do with the Pharaoh's books was nothing short of a miracle. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1290 I miss the good old days, too 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1291 Can you believe Attila wants to take Persia with a gang audit? 1.1831 0.06121 71 62 5 4
1292 These hostile takeovers just aren't what they used to be. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1293 It was your job to read the fine print. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1294 Ours sales force is unstoppable. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1295 His majesty wants to tweak the pre nup. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1296 Look on the bright side. We have all the summer interns we need. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
1297 What's with the hour lunch break? 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1298 I think we have enough human sacrifice for the next couple years. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1299 You know, I miss the good old days when you could just pillage without fear of litigation. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
1300 I know they're good at charging. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
1301 The general wants to show we mean business. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1302 What did you think he meant by "give them their marching orders?" 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
1303 I tell you their knees will quiver when they behold our massed forces of negotiation. 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
1304 I hope I remembered to lock the front door. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1305 Sometimes I feel like office politics may be getting out of hand. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1306 I STILL SAY THAT WE SHOULD HAVE TURNED LEFT AT THE RIVER! 1.1831 0.06121 71 62 5 4
1307 Where's the glory in leading a rat race? 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1308 I don't know, maybe we could start a call center. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1309 This time we're going to pillage the intellectual property. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1310 Lemmings, LLC. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1311 Next stop, paperwork mountain. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1312 Death and taxes, ready or not! 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1313 So I say to the Sultan, 'My lawyers can beat up your lawyers . . . .' 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
1314 I just don't think secular humanism is worth fighting for. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1315 You're right. Once we hacked their computers, they surrendered. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1316 I hate negotiating. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1317 Victory will be ours -- and attorney costs, too! 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1318 We're in trouble—the Dumpty family just filed a wrongful death suit. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1319 For me, the most important part of any hostile takeover is the hostility. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1320 Not even our fiercest enemy will withstand an army of insurance agents 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1321 He actually shot somebody in the middle of Fifth Avenue? 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
1322 Now we'll close that Johnson account. 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1323 The naked love slaves were more fun than this lot. 1.1831 0.06121 71 62 5 4
1324 I just held up the $ sign. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
1325 I hate negotiating first! 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
1326 Well then why are they following us? Either you filed our Rape and Pillage Taxes after April 15th, or you failed to report earnings from the sack on Carthage... 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
1327 I don't think this is the best defense we can get... 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1328 This is the last time we answer an ad on Craig's List 1.1806 0.04565 72 59 13 0
1329 Why am I beginning to think the 6 train shutdown isn't temporary? 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
1330 I love the smell of lawyers burning at dawn. 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
1331 I guess the plan is to bore them to death 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1332 One-third of the plunder is the best contingency rate you can get in today's market. 1.1806 0.06041 72 63 5 4
1333 We should reach the courthouse by nightfall. 1.1806 0.04565 72 59 13 0
1334 Because apparently, a successful "Hostile Takeover" requires suits on the ground. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
1335 This is the first time I have lead a band of marauding lawyers. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1336 Call me old-fashioned but I just don't get this 'bury them with paperwork' strategy. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1337 That symbol on your staff means 'I need insurance'. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1338 Ok, how about if we yell 'We have more fearsome arbitrators than you!' No, um, how's 'Fear our Suits!'. Jeez, I miss the old days. 1.1806 0.06041 72 63 5 4
1339 We will, we will sue you! 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
1340 I’m not sure about this new ‘shock and bore’ strategy. 1.1806 0.04565 72 59 13 0
1341 I just made sure each of their administrative assistants wrote "long march" into their calendars 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
1342 We're gonna sue them into the Middle Ages! 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1343 We came, we saw, we subpoenaed. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1344 So he asks me where I see myself in five years and I says that I would like to be a leader in a corporate environment. And that was only three years ago. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
1345 I don't get this new rage for gray flannel. I say, give me leather and sheepskin any day. 1.1806 0.06041 72 63 5 4
1346 We bring 10,000 lawyers and they beg to surrender. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1347 The retainer fees alone will kill 'em. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
1348 They'll never know what hit 'em. 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
1349 Trust me. They can pillage more with those strange satchels than an army of barbarians, and they'll take 33% without slitting our throats. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1350 I know the pointy helmets are a liability, but sheesh... 1.1806 0.04565 72 59 13 0
1351 You asked for guys with a siege mentality. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1352 I can feel the future creeping up on me.... 1.1806 0.04565 72 59 13 0
1353 Trump said that you can fool a lot of the people enough of the time. 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
1354 I think you checked off the wrong requisition box! 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
1355 I miss the good old days before binding arbitration. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1356 Fine--in addition to bathing in the blood of our enemies we will allow working from home on Fridays. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
1357 You go to war with the army you have, not the one you wish you had. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1358 Are you _sure_ the pen is mightier than the sword? 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
1359 It's retaliation: They kill one of ours, we kill 20 of theirs. They sue us for tax loopholes, we slow them down in so much discovery paperwork they won't know what hit 'em 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1360 I don't know but I've been told...CEOs can all be sold... 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
1361 I miss the days when you could burn and pillage without an army of lawyers. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1362 How many lawyers does it take? Too many. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1363 Somehow an army of lawyers seemed like the right decision... 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
1364 The Queen is getting lawyered up. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1365 You rape, I'll pillage, and the rest of them can audit their taxes. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
1366 Next time use a real head hunter. 1.1774 0.05405 62 52 9 1
1367 I'm not sure if this IS enough lawyers to get us through the current administration. 1.1765 0.05904 68 59 6 3
1368 My saga is truly never ending. 1.1765 0.05904 68 59 6 3
1369 Lance-chasers. 1.1746 0.05326 63 53 9 1
1370 Medieval Knievel can NOT clear this many. 1.1746 0.06613 63 56 3 4
1371 I told Genghis that paternity suits were a possibility, but he wouldn't listen! 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
1372 Their army is weak, but they are litigious. 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
1373 'Suiting up for battle' ain't what it used to be. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
1374 CNN will never know what hit them. 1.1667 0.05403 60 51 8 1
1375 It's not the battle I'm concerned about. It's the billable hours. 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
1376 More swords would have been pretty mighty too. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
1377 The law is mightier than the sword, you say? 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1378 Because Genghis Khan ordered us to lawyer up. That's why. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1379 They won’t even know what hit them. 1.1642 0.05862 67 59 5 3
1380 You better pray "the pen is mightier than the sword", or else we're doomed! 1.1642 0.05862 67 59 5 3
1381 I think they mentioned something about a 'hostile take-over'. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1382 It's not like the old days. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1383 And apparently we were still over budget. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1384 First we try it my way... 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1385 I was expecting less paperwork. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1386 You know the war cry 'Generally Accepted Accounting Principles--Fuck, Yeah'? I did that one. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1387 They're not dangerous. They only have sandwiches in their satchels. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1388 Clearly their presence has discouraged lawsuits. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1389 These corporate retreats are exhaustin. 1.1642 0.05862 67 59 5 3
1390 And they say management isn't a fullfilling career choice. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1391 I think Trump's Cabinet meetings have gone too far 1.1642 0.05862 67 59 5 3
1392 They have words ... the best words. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1393 The White House is dead ahead. 1.1642 0.05862 67 59 5 3
1394 This will be a wasted trip if they plead the Fifth. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
1395 Every 1000 years someone wants a Crusade to bring jobs back. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1396 Remember when war was just war. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
1397 I don't know why he just doesn't say he's not going to release his return. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1398 Ever since we started to supply a lawyer to every citizen of the villages we plunder so they can offer a debriefing and a notarized statement on who we are and what is about to transpire, we've had little to no resistance 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1399 They should surrender once they see the money behind us 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1400 Tell me again why it was better to bring them in house? 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
1401 And then she had the nerve to say I'm a very litigious man ... 1.1642 0.05862 67 59 5 3
1402 Speak legalese and carry a big stick. 1.1642 0.05862 67 59 5 3
1403 It's a tactic called 'Shock and Law.' 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1404 You know the ancient Pharaohs used multi-level marketing, too. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1405 History will remember the March of Homo Erectus cum Ties et Briefcasus. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1406 It always seems like we lose momentum when we get lawyers involved. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1407 I hear there's another restructuring coming 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
1408 If I wanted to stare at a horse's ass all day, I would have walked behind Gerry. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1409 Let's make this quick. These soldiers charge by the hour. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
1410 I keep saying, lawyers don't kill people, people kill people. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1411 These corporate team-building activities are getting a little ridiculous. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
1412 Ever since the King went with the flat tax, the recruiters have been flooded with accountants. 1.1642 0.06236 67 60 3 4
1413 Hostile takeovers aren't as fun as they used to be. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1414 I still like my work, but I haven't got used to the name "mergers and acquisitions". 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1415 I asked you to assemble the army, not the Armani. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1416 Res ipsa loquitur, Sir John! 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
1417 I take it you intend to negotiate a settlement? 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1418 This will be the mother of all lawsuits. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
1419 Sure, but their billable hours are frightening. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1420 The emperor has promised untold riches to any senator willing to sell the new healthcare bill. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1421 There are no real standouts. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
1422 The mercenary agencies assured me they have raiding experience. 1.1642 0.05862 67 59 5 3
1423 First, let's kill all the lawyers. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
1424 No, I don't think it's possible to be too well-prepped for a deposition. 1.1639 0.04779 61 51 10 0
1425 Yes, I told you to raise an army for a takeover, but this isn't what I meant. 1.1636 0.05664 55 47 7 1
1426 Onward Christian Dior soldiers. 1.1636 0.05664 55 47 7 1
1427 Second row, mustache, didn't even graduate. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
1428 They'll surrender as soon as we get there. The fortress hasn't been built that can withstand this many lawyers. 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
1429 The lawsuits should give us a century of breathing room. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
1430 I thought when they said "army of lawyers" they were being metaphorical. 1.1613 0.05241 62 53 8 1
1431 When the king said bring them back alive, did he mean on the inside too? 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
1432 Well, I miss the days when you could see a hostile takeover coming. 1.1579 0.04873 57 48 9 0
1433 Be sure to say "literally" the next time you call for headhunters. 1.1579 0.06023 57 50 5 2
1434 Who would've thought we would have so many converts from Conservatism to Odinism, this quickly??? 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1435 I warned her I was hiring an army of lawyers. 1.1562 0.05984 64 57 4 3
1436 I told you, we should've used the wooden horse idea. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1437 Forget about pillagers. It's these auditors that really scare people. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1438 I miss rape and pillage. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1439 How much do you think it costs Genghis to keep them on retainer? 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1440 We will reign our subpoenas down on them until it darkens the sky. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1441 Admit it, you had no idea what corporate raiding meant either. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1442 Live Action Role-Playing used to be so much fun, until we started including the "Terms of Service." 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1443 Look, this plundering with lawyers is totally effective, but I miss the romance. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1444 I tell you, it doesn't matter who wins the battle. With an army of lawyers we will always come out on top. 1.1562 0.05984 64 57 4 3
1445 I didn't realize how easy it would be to get the G.O.P. to follow a little inconsequential twerp. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1446 This job would be easier if we had lemmings. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1447 ....two are accountants and the others are all attorneys. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1448 Probe with the auditors. Then hit em with tax law on the right flank, contract law on the left. 1.1562 0.05984 64 57 4 3
1449 Plunder, then pillage, then litigate. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1450 Where's the Pied Piper when ya need him? 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1451 When do we tell them we actually can't pay their bill? 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1452 Yes I know, but lawyers are savage fighters and they don't take prisoners! 1.1562 0.05984 64 57 4 3
1453 They've got the guns, but we've got the lawyers. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1454 Trust me, they'll recognize a Scourge Of God when they see one. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1455 The tax men cometh. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1456 Talk about your drone warfare! 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1457 They're Insider Traders. We're taken them to the Tower 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1458 When all else fails, sue them. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1459 They have announced the new tax code. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1460 I said "armor"—not "Armani." 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1461 The Decline and Fall of the Trumpian Empire 1.1562 0.05984 64 57 4 3
1462 I'd prefer to settle out of battlefield. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1463 We'll show those Pagans we mean business! 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1464 It's time to sue for peace. 1.1562 0.05984 64 57 4 3
1465 This time, the archbishop will know we mean business. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1466 I hope Thor didn't also get lawyered up, it would be nice to end this raid quickly. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1467 I told my boss I'd work from home today. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1468 We had to tell them wer'e crusading to remove taxes on capital gains. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1469 "I hope they all have their fountain pens loaded 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1470 Bloodbath, hell! It’s going to be an inkbath! 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1471 H.R. says we need more diversity. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1472 Well, the orders were to find the most ruthless in all the land, and I'm not turning around! 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1473 Pillaging was a lot more fun when it wasn't billed by the hour. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1474 Told you the new recruiting poster was off-brand. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1475 I'm not too confident in our rear flank. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1476 They do know it's not that type of hostile takeover, right? 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1477 First we send in the lawyers. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1478 You know you can't lead the horses' asses to water, right? 1.1562 0.05984 64 57 4 3
1479 We need more women in the workplace. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1480 And that's how I became Khan of the Goldman Horde. 1.1562 0.05984 64 57 4 3
1481 Did you call ahead for reservations? 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1482 When this story is told, they will be "rats", and we will be "the pied piper". 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1483 I asked for an army that's accountable, not accountants! 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1484 I miss the old days when the sword was mightier than pen. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1485 These insurance salesmen follow every lead!! 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1486 Like I said, you can never have enough lawyers 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1487 They're crusading against Casual Friday. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1488 Remember the good old days? When you could be a horde without a legion of lawyers. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1489 Forget the battle... our guys will talk them into surrender. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1490 It wasn't always accrual world. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1491 And you thought the lemmings were fun to watch! 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1492 Raping and pillaging is so much easier with an army of tax accountants. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1493 You did call ahead for reservations, right? 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1494 I'm told they're the best hostile takeover men around, but I'm skeptical. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1495 I'm just saying women are smarter, that's all. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1496 The 20% off combo at the Pied Piper is really paying off. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1497 I was out of ideas so I drew this 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1498 They're all bloodthirsty warriors from the courthouse steppes. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1499 So... this is gonna cost us 400 bucks an hour times how many? 1.1562 0.05984 64 57 4 3
1500 A 'War of Words' sure sounds better than it really is. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1501 So, it's settled then? 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1502 They say middle management has become obsolete. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1503 Even leading them to death, they still want us to pay taxes. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1504 These new rules of engagement are a bit much. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1505 If your cousin Genghis had these tax attorneys, we'd all be speaking Mongolian now 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1506 Whoever said, 'never work with animals or children', never worked with accountants. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1507 These corporate hostile takeovers are starting to get me down. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1508 When they sue for peace, we'll have them right where we want them. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1509 Maybe you should have asked a few more questions before you volunteered us to lead the People's Crusade? 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1510 I'm glad I got the job, but now I'm saddled with a ton more responsibility. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1511 They love his vision. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
1512 We'll know soon if the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1513 You can lead a business man to water... 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1514 They were already mercenaries. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1515 Somehow I don't think this grail is all that holy. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
1516 They're followers, not leaders. 1.1562 0.05554 64 56 6 2
1517 In the old days, you didn't even need lawyers when you went pillaging. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
1518 I know what we did was bad, but do we really need this many lawyers? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
1519 And I'm telling you, all these accountants will be our downfall! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
1520 The direct assault failed. Now we're looking for tax loopholes. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
1521 Let's go defend those loopholes 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
1522 Whose idea was it to bring insurance underwriters to our Crusade?? 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
1523 This sure is an odd way to start the trial! 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
1524 After the first wave of consultants, we'll hit 'em with our accountants! 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
1525 You know you can lead a lawyer to water, but he is going to charge you anyway. 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
1526 We'll crush them with litigation. 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
1527 Leading an army of lawyers, sad! 1.1525 0.05829 59 52 5 2
1528 Heh heh -- Whadya call a legion of lawyers marching into battle...? 1.1525 0.04721 59 50 9 0
1529 At least we're not slaves to fashion. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
1530 I know they dress funny, but they march perfectly in lockstep and will do anything to survive. 1.1500 0.04649 60 51 9 0
1531 I said Warrior, not Lawyer! 1.1500 0.04649 60 51 9 0
1532 We're trying something new. It's called a legal attack. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
1533 I don't know, Daniel, I was giving my typical spiel about absolutism and the ascendance of the deregulated state, and they just sort of started to get in line. 1.1500 0.04649 60 51 9 0
1534 What they lack in terror, they gain in accounting. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
1535 I told you letting them walk was a ploy to jack up their billable hours . 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
1536 They all want corner offices. Raping and pillaging isn't enough anymore. 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
1537 How sure are you that the pen is mightier than the sword? 1.1500 0.05737 60 53 5 2
1538 Well... we did say we wanted an army of drones... 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
1539 Look, I'm telling you for the last time, this is a legal battle! 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
1540 They want 25-33% of the pillage. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
1541 I asked for an army of warriors, not lawyers. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
1542 These guys can certainly follow the leader but their side-arms won't be much good in a battle. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
1543 I told all of them to suit up for the next crusade. Boy ... the times have changed... 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
1544 Puts a whole new twist on 'corporate raider', don't you think? 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1545 Well, how 'bout we sing 'Heigh-ho, Heigh-ho, It's Off To Work We Go.." 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1546 Since when did ransacked villagers all get so litigious? 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1547 when we get to the rest area, jump off and get to the rest room. I'll tell them to stand by while we check to make sure no enemy is hiding inside. if they won't wait, we'll have to change into our brown uniforms. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1548 Are you as bored as I am? Conquer and enslave. Enslave and conquer. Every day, the same old thing. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1549 First Hostile Corporate Take Over. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1550 These guys are dangerous, they can bring down any economy. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1551 I thought you said these guys specialize in hostile takeovers. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1552 They all watched too many episodes of Game of Thrones. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1553 This paper trail is ridiculous! 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1554 You call them unsullied, I call them corporate drones 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1555 I really don't like this version of the Pied Piper! 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1556 Who knew conquering could be so complicated? 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1557 Not one of them knows the secret handshake. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1558 We shall cross the Wall Street and pillage Nasdaq! 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1559 Good haul! Sell them whole or for parts? 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1560 Silk Road hell, they're wearing polyester. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1561 Remake of Spartacus 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1562 I don't get it, aren't they already prisoners? 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1563 The Academy doesn't want to take any chances next year. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1564 I love being a process server. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1565 We will be fully taxed in this battle; the CPAs will provide some relief. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1566 I really miss pillaging and raping with no legal liability. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1567 You know, we used to have fun on these battles until the personal-injury lawyers turned up. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1568 I advertised the best cardio workout ever – that's how. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1569 You are aware we just passed the office complex. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1570 Into the jaws of wealth 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1571 Does the Grey Flannel Horde do anything for you? Let's settle. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1572 This is the greatest army of corporate raiders the world has ever seen. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1573 Raping and pillaging just isn't the same since the Geneva Conventions. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1574 They follow like sheep if you promise them a Something called "a martini". 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1575 You said you wanted a hostile takeover. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1576 I guess this is what the King meant by us showing no mercy. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1577 I object to you leading the witnesses. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1578 Jimmy, ye think we got enough lawyers for Mr. T? - Shhh, Bob, they still think they're getting paid. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1579 Should we tell them the second prize is a set of steak knives ? 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1580 I did NOT sign up for an Accountants Crusade! 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1581 Frankly, I think we will need some time to adjust to this civilian control thing. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1582 Did you remember to feed the cat? 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1583 I said army of warriors not lawyers 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1584 This case is heating up. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1585 So then, 'The Goldman Horde'? 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1586 I'm hoping they just settle with us. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1587 We came, we saw, we sued. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1588 You better hope we reach the front line before happy hour. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1589 We never should have asked the recruiter for men who are all business. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1590 It's Michael Flynn's case. I think he's ready to flip. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1591 ...and they thought they were "Barbarians at the Gate"!!! 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1592 What have you fed these horses that drop such fetid dung? 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1593 We might not have enough men for the hostile takeover. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1594 "Lead hostile takeover" sounded a lot cooler in the ad. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1595 Memo to self: Shut down the recruitning office on Madison. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1596 You'll like the way we pillage; I guarantee it. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1597 I knew the land of Accountantos would be an easy victory. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1598 I found them through an online résumé search for "loyal foot soldiers". 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1599 And you said the Lemming Day parade wouldn't last beyond 428 AD!? 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1600 The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1601 This is the perfect spot for our corporate retreat. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1602 Are they still following us? 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1603 I just don't see ourselves as corporate raiders. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1604 I hate to bring work home, but I volunteered to do the debriefing. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1605 They're all hedge managers but there's no hedges around here. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1606 Pillage, plunder, evict. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1607 You wouldn't believe the paperwork if we lose the battle. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1608 Our leadership's no problem today. But wait until the stockholders meeting next month! 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1609 Not what I meant by "hostile takeover." 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1610 They save us a fortune in pooper scooper fines. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1611 They won't know what hit them; they'll be in court for years. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1612 Global domination was sure easier before Watchdog Groups. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1613 On second thought, let's not negotiate. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1614 This isn't what I meant by an army of lawyers. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1615 Relax. It's just a paper war. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1616 I don't trust them. Underneath that outward conservative attire, they are all lefties. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1617 The Western Armies will be no match for Emmett, Goldstein & Walsh 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1618 On the other hand, being an EMT can be rewarding. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1619 Not sure what they're after. It sounds like "corner office" but I can't be sure. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1620 I hate Viking To Work Day. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1621 Personally, I'd gone with a two-button. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1622 Millennials have no understanding of the power suit concept. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1623 Our battle strategy? We tie 'em up in court for years and then settle for massive spoils of war. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1624 Let's hope the pen is mightier than the sword! 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1625 Offering this merger idea is just stupid! Why can we plunder and rape them like we normally do?! 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1626 Our army is weak but litigious. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1627 I wonder if Cersei will be naked or not.... 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1628 The king with the most lawyers wins. But I miss the killing, raping and pillaging. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1629 Ever get that feeling you're being followed ? 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1630 He has good communication skills but he's light on pillaging. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1631 Once more into the briefcase, dear friend. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1632 I told you I had no idea how to lead an office. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1633 We should never have reinstated the draft. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1634 It's the boss's new strategy -- we paper them to death. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1635 Hostile takeovers always require an army of lawyers. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1636 Remember when we could pillage and plunder without a team of lawyers? 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1637 The guy in the second row has an awesome stash. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1638 "Capture all of his lawyers", he said. "How many can there be?" he said. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1639 They’re called lawyers, supposed to be able to talk an opposing army to death. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1640 I like to get Wall Street's help in takeovers. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1641 Not sure, Ragnar, but they say they're all from a place called Hamelin. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1642 Since when did the spoils of war include so many accountants? 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1643 Matching 401K contributions has really turned around our recruitment 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1644 What shall we pick: death or taxes? 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1645 Audits are fine...but I miss the raping and pillaging. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1646 I just love these corporate retreats. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1647 These IBM slaves are much more compliant than those quirky Apple helots we conquered last week. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1648 I don't believe this army is well suited. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1649 Way to go, Pied Piper. We could've been knee-deep in New Moscow Mules in the Rose Garden, but somebody had to go and volunteer us for Drain the Swamp duties. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1650 The battering ram is now so "yesterday". 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1651 At the gate? I thought he said Litigate... 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1652 So the Emperor gives me this line. 'Anybody can conquer kingdoms, gather beautiful concubines or capture treasure ships,' he says. 'But it takes a real man to bring back the necessary clerical support,' he says ... 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1653 These mergers get dicier each year 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1654 I said to capture the earnest and young! 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1655 Robert Mueller has them following the money trail. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1656 Would you be willing to trade all your days for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they’ll never get away with it in court!?! 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1657 Don't look now, but I think we're being followed. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1658 It used to be so simple and pure: kill, plunder, burn and move on. Then the suits screwed it all up. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1659 "An army of lawyers can never be conquered." Are you sure you got that right? 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1660 If we get the first one to jump, the rest will follow? 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1661 Litigation. Pffft. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1662 Legal hassles can take all the fun out of plundering. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1663 If you think Genghis Khan was ruthless, wait till these lawyers get done! 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1664 I don't think we've ever had such obedient slaves before. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1665 It's their longbow men against our middle management. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1666 Their Centurian keeps asking if we can stop at 'Starbucks' ... says our logos are similar, so we'd like the place. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1667 Because they're more bloodthirsty. 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1668 My advice? Always bring your legal team. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1669 The kids aren't going to want this for dinner. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1670 Remember when we used to lop people's heads off? I am SO tired of these legal battles. 1.1475 0.06112 61 55 3 3
1671 I think I'll call it, "The Lawyer Crusades." It has a nice ring to it. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1672 It's amazing what people will do for a tax break. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
1673 Do you know the words to "One Hundred Bottles of Beer on the Wall"? 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1674 Doesn't it seem to you that these pre-trial motions are becoming endless? 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1675 Sure, they're following us now, but wait until the oats kick in. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1676 Corporate is really taking it too far with these team building activities. 1.1475 0.05647 61 54 5 2
1677 And you thought your divorce was gonna be amicable! 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
1678 Someone should tell them that this is not one of the habits of highly successful people. 1.1429 0.05363 56 49 6 1
1679 To the land of silk ties and money. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1680 Think they are still behind us? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1681 She is NOT getting half of my kingdom in the divorce settlement! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1682 You wouldn't believe the amount of lawyers it takes to run an empire 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1683 They're called Republican senators. They voted against something called Trumpcare. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1684 these new Wall Street recruits are a pain in the ass 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1685 I didn't sign on for Game of Thrones for Drones. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1686 When I said the M&A army, I meant murder and arson. Who are these fellows? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1687 Seems like everyone is lawyering up these days. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1688 Maybe we shouldn't have raided their cubicles. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1689 I know times are changing, but I'd still rather lead an armed siege than a hostile takeover. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1690 Take no prisoners. Litigate them to death. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1691 I thought this was going to be a friendly takeover. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1692 I don't know where you picked up this 'All right, men, suit up!' command, but don't ever do it again. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1693 In case you haven't turned around...campaign managers can be replaced. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1694 Mueller is staffing up his investigation of collusion and King Herald agreed to help. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1695 I miss being able to vote on the finalists. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1696 The way I see it, the worst part of war is the insurance claims adjusters. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1697 See? I told you they would go for the deal if we wore these outfits! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1698 I want to sack Constantinople not audit it. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1699 And at dawn, we swoop down from the north and sue them into submission! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1700 Hey! The king said to give them the business. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1701 Corporate raiders on the march! Sound off, one, two... 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1702 I'm thinking now I'd rather be called Attila The Hun than Attila The Venture Capitalist 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1703 Mom was right. I should have gone to work for the company making briefcases. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1704 I don't like fighting with the army we have. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1705 It's a small world... after all. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1706 I warned you that excess plunder would create a tax problem! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1707 Our liege says they will help in a corporate takeover, whatever that is. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1708 If you can't join `em, sue `em. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1709 and we all go marching down to the ground, to get out of the rain.. BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
1710 At my signal, unleash the Ponzi scheme. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1711 Do you think the promise of unlimited billable hours convinced them? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1712 And you thought the subway was crowded! 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1713 "Can't we have one company barbecue without a "team building" excercise? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1714 What would Caesar do? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1715 These Cabinet meetings keep getting more elaborate. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1716 They're expecting a cyberattack. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1717 So you think instead of a large wooden horse, that free financial advice will get you in the door? 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1718 As you know, you go to war with the army you have, not the army you might want or wish to have at a later time. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1719 Ever heard of a 'Starbucks'? Their Centurian keeps asking if we can stop at one ... says our logos are similar, so we'd like the place. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1720 Because we need people to prepare our taxes, that's why! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1721 Who made TAX DAY a stinkin' pagan holiday?! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1722 On three we hit 'em hard with legal mumbo jumbo. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1723 Headquarters says it's the Abraham LinkedIn Brigade. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1724 If the FDA were doing its job it would not have approved this merger. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1725 I thought we were going to Starbucks. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1726 Taxes are coming 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1727 What if the horse shits? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1728 Thor will never suspect there're our warriors dressed in those grey flannel suits. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
1729 This gives a whole new meaning to a phalanx of lawyers. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1730 Somehow I didn't feel so dirty when we were just leading Vandals. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1731 The ad said, "If you need defenders call Attila and Associates." 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1732 With all of these lawyers, we must be in for one helluva fight. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1733 Where is the third horseman? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1734 Remember when we could just pillage and not have to lawyer up. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1735 Something about 're-occupy Wall Street', I think. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1736 I'm beginning to have second thoughts about our Casual Friday policy. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1737 I love the sound of marching accountants in the morning. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1738 ...So he says ,"You and what army?". We're going to sue the pants off that guy. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1739 Do think threatening to sue them might really work? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1740 I hate how we're in charge of the weekend crusaders 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1741 I just don't feel like they have our backs.. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1742 There was absolutely no collusion, but lawyering up is really the only prudent course. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1743 Who knew attorneys could be so much more intimidating marauding hoards. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1744 Genghis wouldn't be intimidated but the Donald might. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1745 Our struggles to queue up and march the "Road Warriors" has become easier than herding our coliseum lions 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1746 Can't we go back to trading the old way, without the investment advisors? 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1747 We're bringing them to the class on chivalry! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1748 Back in my day is all about pillaging and decapitation and less about litigation. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1749 Pillaging used to be a lot more fun when we didn't have to lawyer up first. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1750 Why? Because the boss' demand for unconditional loyalty always Trumps a pledge of honesty. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1751 I said bring axes, not execs. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1752 Can you imagine the fees! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1753 This batch could complete the audit so he can release his damn tax return. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1754 Look, her orders were clear: 'Cut down on the casual tees.' 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1755 I don't think this is what the Emperor meant when he said we would need an army of lawyers to beat him. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1756 You told the king you could raise an army with a brief case? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1757 Take heart, Gawain. His Majesty has assured me, they are supremely accomplished at raping and pillaging. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1758 Well, if they agree to try your PLUG idea, I'm dropping back a minimum 50 paces! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1759 The King said that we would lead a legion of predators. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1760 I hope their brains are sharper than their clothing. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1761 I prefer pillaging, but I suppose death-by-boredom is more humane. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1762 We come in peace to foreclose upon this land. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1763 This will take care of the enemy. We'll sue everyone in their country. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1764 Did they say 'battle' or 'banal?' 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1765 In hindsight it was an uneven merger. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1766 When we get back to the office, take care of the weakest ones. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1767 They're following the Russian collusion story to the lemmings cliff. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1768 We may lose the war but we'll win the peace treaty! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1769 So you're positively sure you haven't missed any payments on the horses. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1770 If they don' meet our terms, they shall taste my indemnification. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1771 ... like sheep being led to the slaughter. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1772 - It looks like the women knew where to lead us, at least, when they chucked us out. - I thought my wife was spending a lot of time outside with the lawnmower. When I looked at our garden, I just thought she didn't know how to work it properly. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1773 It's not a real crusade without an army of lawyers. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1774 I told them, if you want the job, you'll have to work knights. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1775 I get it, they crave adventure, but can they row? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1776 I said to invade with " mongul hoards " , not " mogul hoards " . 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1777 I am pretty sure production said 'armor suits', but somehow they got Armani suits, and we had to shoot this scene today. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1778 Nowadays we can plunder with just law suits. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1779 This is how you really drain the swamp. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1780 Yeah, those were the days when hostile takeovers didn't involve all these lawyers. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1781 They said there were Inhumane Resources. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1782 Remember, the attorneys will only be used if the boiling oil and catapults fail. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1783 With this army of lawyers we're invincible. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1784 When do we tell them we're fully insured? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1785 I totally forgot to get more coffee filters for the break room. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1786 "An anomaly in Schedule C" is how he phrased it. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
1787 We've been following this horse's ass for 168 days. Have you ever seen smaller hands on such a big dude? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1788 Yeah,it's the Magna Carta,but THIS many lawyers? 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1789 I don't get it either. My casting agent specifically said this movie was titled "Barbarians at the Gate". 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1790 We will annihilate their whole civilization with legalese. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1791 Apparently, it's to be an important audit. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1792 We're ready to accept your terms and conditions for surrender. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1793 Tell me again why they're calling this the "War of the Roses, Melmans and O'Connors, LLC"? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1794 Back to the old and polluting US factories. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1795 Well, the King did say he had an army of lawyers. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1796 I hope this 'subpoena power' you speak of is truly mighty, because they don't look fit enough to be water boys. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1797 These guys will do anything to make partner. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1798 Corporate America meet.....Russia. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1799 Now they'll see we mean business. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1800 I think we're relying too much on our legal staff. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1801 Yeah, we're going to need to see a receipt for that. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1802 Considering we haven't won yet, do you think we may have gotten a little ahead of ourselves with all the accountants? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1803 Yeah, an "army of lawyers". Well, wait til he sees our army of lawyers! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1804 It's a hostile takeover. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1805 I miss the days before the king's plunder tax 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1806 I still can't believe all we had to say was "Follow us to the land of a million audits". 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1807 What are the chances none of them have seen Ben Hur? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1808 Is the pen mightier than the sword? We're about to find out. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1809 Not what I expected when asked to lead the Trump University graduation procession. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1810 I miss the old days. We just took over a place and didn't have to bring all the damn lawyers. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1811 You know what they say...your best offense is a good defense. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1812 I don't think our good king understands 'lawyering up.' 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
1813 Once we get over the next hill we'll gallop like hell, lose these geeks and their slapping briefcases. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1814 The first thing we do, let's kill all the playwrights. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1815 IRS audits get worse every year. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1816 Hey man, how many people did you tell about our shortcut? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1817 Well, they do blindly follow our law. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1818 I'm positive the Emperor said, Victory is ours, “by all accounts,” not “buy all the accountants.” 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1819 I thought we were supposed to follow the money! 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1820 "This is will be a brutal contest with lots of ink being spilled. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1821 Twenty years ago we didn't even HAVE an HR department. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1822 Seeing it's only a rat race, I think they should have just called on the Pied Piper. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1823 I'm going to enjoy papering them to death. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1824 We built it, they are coming, but how are we going to feed them all? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1825 They are economists ... you should see how damage they can do. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1826 Yes, fighting with axes was great, but these attorneys draw even more blood. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1827 A man with a briefcase can pillage more money than any man with a sword 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1828 During the hostile takeover, make sure they stay in columns and rows. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1829 True, their battle garb and weapons need upgrades. But lock-step conformity wins holy wars. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1830 Suitcases and suits? Not sure about this new warfare strategy. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
1831 Are you sure they need this many lawyers for one lousy impeachment? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1832 War hasn't been the same since we hired all these MBAs 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1833 Their mission is to get the participant liability waivers signed. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1834 The chainmail and armor won't protect you from a well worded writ. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1835 Tax season is coming. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1836 We'll camp at Silicon Valley. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1837 When they asked, I said "brief," and that seemed to convince them. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1838 Here comes the lawyers. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1839 This takes "off-site corporate retreat" to a whole new level. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1840 the constant paternity suits are becoming a distraction. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1841 Because, lawyers cause more damage than flaming arrows 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1842 After a three day audit our enemies will lay down their arms. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1843 Let's just see if those mongrels can sustain this objection! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1844 We'll teach the bastards. Those who live by the injunction die by the injunction! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1845 Look, I'm going to ask that you pledge your loyalty to me. It would be a big mistake not to. Believe me. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1846 Harvard, Shmarvard. At Stanford B school, I hear they wear flip-flops. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1847 Are we there yet? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1848 With our army of overpaid lawyers, we will conquer anything! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1849 They say we are being "audited"? Also, what is a "horse receipt?" 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1850 Guess we will see if the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1851 I'm not sure this is how you sue for peace. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1852 We'll show the king we mean business! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1853 They claim to have experience in hostile acquisitions 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1854 Looting ain't what it used to be. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1855 Should I be worried about those deductions for raping and pillaging expenses? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1856 Do you think we may be overdoing this? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1857 It's "Carpool Tunnel Syndrome." Makes them real easy to capture. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1858 You can't despoil anything today without an army of lawyers. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1859 I said there was a slip-and-fall over at the Castle. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1860 I thought we could just settle our differences with a few decapitations, but my ex wants to get nasty. 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
1861 If I sue, you think I have a case? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1862 These corporate raiders are supposed to be ruthless. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1863 "They said to expect few women in positions of power but this is ridiculous". 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1864 Rape and pillage were more fun before management hired liability lawyers. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1865 This is not going to be pretty. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1866 "They'll be sorry they named their stove company Viking? 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1867 I love a good M&A crusade. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1868 Did you notice none of the women bought it? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1869 I thought the children's crusade would be our worst, but now I don't know. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1870 I had no idea it was going to be a legal battle, either! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1871 Not Vandals or Huns. Lawyers. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1872 The king is finalizing his divorce today. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1873 I thought this was the silk road, not the suit road! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1874 What if the other side has already lawyered-up, you bonehead! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1875 He asked for all the lawyers we could gather. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1876 When I told the quartermaster to fit them out in suits, this wasn't what I meant. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1877 You can lead a suit to water but you can't make em drink 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
1878 We also offer a leadership journey for women on Tuesdays. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1879 Looks like the casting department pulled a real doozy this time. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1880 You're nobody these days unless you're lawyered up. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1881 Lawyers have been talking about it since medieval? times and they will finally have the real thing thanks to our horses. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1882 I don't get it... no matter what we feed these horses, lawyers! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1883 The question seems not so much "Quo vadis?" as "Cui bono?" 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1884 Vlad, I'm telling you, an army of lawyers will win the day every time. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1885 Leave it to bureaucrats... we ask for a legion of 10,000 warriors, and we get 10,000 Norwegian lawyers! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1886 That People of the Steppes v. Khan ruling really takes the fun out of this. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1887 I hate it when the king gets audited. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1888 I get the feeling these guys haven't realized what kind of "work retreat" they're on yet. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1889 The lawyers sure have taken the fun out of raping and pillaging. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1890 I told them we're on a quest for class action plaintiffs. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1891 Tromp, tromp, Trump! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1892 We'll show those guys that we mean business. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1893 We're gonna show our enemies that this time we mean business. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1894 Brace yourselves. Lay-offs are coming. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1895 And here's the punch line. This guy says " I come from a long line of lawyers." 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1896 We send in these Goldman Sachs guys first and the whole kingdom collapses. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1897 Pillaging was way more fun before they bought in the accountants. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1898 Maybe our culture focused a bit too much on education. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1899 They're a compliant bunch. Let's send them in first. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1900 Hey, I know a song; we were looking for a rainbow, trying to find a sign...a place where we could harmonize. A place we almost found. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1901 All I had to say was "tax cut"! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1902 Brown nosers. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1903 Escorting The Crusades Life Insurance Agents to their convention is not my idea of waging war! 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1904 How long, you think, until they realize we're not actually going anywhere? 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1905 But what use are they without their smart phones? 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1906 Want to stop for a beer? 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1907 Their shoes do squeak. But saves the cost of chains, right? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1908 And so he says to me: 'I'm a firm believer in corporate punishment.' 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1909 So I said, "I'll give you corporate raiders!" 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1910 Sure, they may be followers. But I take stock in their bonds. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1911 Prepare for legal battle 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1912 my parents pushed for an M.B.A but I'm glad I stuck with textile design. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1913 God may be on their side, but the lawyers are the only one's that really win anymore. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1914 Are you sure the king's writ runneth this far? 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1915 I'll have my people talk to your people. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1916 I tell ya, there is more plunder with lawyers than with any other army. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1917 Trump's new legal team 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1918 Tell their people to get in touch with our people. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1919 It just seems that lately this crusade has become less about martyrdom and more about the billable hour. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1920 When I enlisted, I never thought that one day I'd have to lawyer up 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1921 Kushner is coming. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1922 Put 'em in suits and they'll automatically follow any jackass. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1923 Surrender or I'll unleash the lawyers! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1924 This brings 'lawyering-up' to a whole new level. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1925 We will drive our enemies before us, burn their villages, and sow their fields with subpoenas! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1926 Our tax collectors did much better when they carried swords and spears. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1927 I said "warriors" and he heard "lawyers" so now we have to sue them to death 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1928 This would've been much easier if you'd remembered to bring the E-Z Pass! 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1929 Tomorrow, we assault the Trump Tower 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1930 Are you sure these are all of "Trumps" lawyers!! 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1931 Our quest is to capture Trump's tax returns or die trying. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1932 Well...we tried Sticks & Stones last battle, so I am willing to try anything this time. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1933 It's called business class with one carry on. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1934 Ohhh, I just got it. They think Genghis Khan is a law firm. 1.1404 0.05838 57 51 4 2
1935 I would be a card carrying member- if I had pockets. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1936 This is a dumb way to advertise briefcases. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1937 We're going to build a Wall Street around this country. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1938 They better have something good in those little boxes 1.1404 0.06352 57 52 2 3
1939 The Crusades were more fun before the lawyers got involved. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1940 I think they're senate conservatives. 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1941 Why even have a deploy accountants button 1.1404 0.05274 57 50 6 1
1942 Honestly, the bureaucracy of conquest is really getting to me. 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1943 THE VANDALS SHALL FLEE FROM OUR LEGION OF PERSONAL INJURY LAWYERS! 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
1944 I'm starting to think Corporate Raider is more of a metaphor. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1945 Hit 'em in the wallet, that's the way to win! 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1946 I didn't realize there were so many lawyers interested in the collusion case against the King. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1947 They are the King's accountants: Lemmings and Lemmings 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1948 Victory is ours. We've got the numbers. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1949 I know it's probably too late, but I've been thinking that it's possible the king was speaking metaphorically about the relative mightiness of pens and swords. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1950 Our Legal Department has taken all the joy out of sacking and pillaging. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1951 I feel out of step with modern warfare. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1952 Sire, Republicans seem to follow you everywhere! 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1953 I prefer to bring my own lawyers. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1954 Lawyers eat barbarians. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1955 All I know is Trump said to round up and bring to him the Senate Republicans working on the health care bill. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1956 Don't worry, the oracle promised me total victory after a brief battle. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1957 They are the most hated and feared men in the world... lawyers. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1958 I finally saw The Lion King last week. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1959 Best Accountant Pride Day Parade yet. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1960 We will defeat them with miles of red tape. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1961 So Sir Cedric asked his majesty, "Who do people fear the most?" And from that simple question sprung the army of IRS lawyers. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1962 These commuter lanes really get backed up on Friday evenings. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1963 Remember, no hacking. It's just our suits against their suits. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1964 Pillaging isn't as much fun since the lawyers got involved. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1965 As I told you Olaf, you go to war with the accountants you have, not the accounts you wish you had." 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1966 What can I do? They like my tweets. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1967 Knowest thou why His Highness lawyereth up? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1968 These days you can't have too many lawyers. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1969 I have no confidence in this latest group of recruits. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1970 I heard the Emperor switched from jousting to arbitration. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1971 I hope their lawyers don't have swords 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1972 This is absolutely my last crusade! 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1973 The conditions in our new battle insurance policy bother me greatly! 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1974 I liked bludgeoning better than suing our enemies. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1975 Best. Robot. Army. Ever. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1976 Hi ho, hi ho, it's off to work we go! 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1977 Off the cliff is above my pay grade. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1978 Hey guys, where do you want to go for lunch? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1979 I hate the A.C.L.U. 1.1379 0.06246 58 53 2 3
1980 Company men. They will do anything. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1981 I hate these congressional oversight committees! 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1982 No, dummy. I said the SWORD is mightier than the pen. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1983 Maybe we're taking this whole corporate raider thing a little too far 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1984 An "army of accountants." Who knew he was serious? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1985 All I said was "Sure, who doesn't need more insurance?" 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1986 I hired an army of lawyers and frankly won't mind if the other side wins. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1987 It's the fear that kills 'em, once the audits start. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1988 They're good for taxes, of course, but can they take and hold territory? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1989 All the fun goes out of pillaging once bean counters get involved ! 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1990 I don't know that Knights of the Cubicle is quite as romantic. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1991 Every year the purge comes after tax season. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
1992 I never knew that the Special Prosecutor job would require so much of a following! 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1993 I don't mind these brief marches. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1994 Just wait till Attila the Hun meets Marvin the Litigator. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1995 I miss the blood and guts but on the other hand are the long lunches. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1996 We'll show them we mean business. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
1997 Not even one of them knew who Pikachu was. 1.1379 0.06246 58 53 2 3
1998 We are guarding against another Google takeover. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
1999 If I had known there was this much red tape to get through just for a raid I would have stayed home. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2000 Looting part is simple-- but keeping the loot safe takes an army of accountants! 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2001 I said "herd" not "nerd" 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2002 Now no enemy can withstand our oral argument. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2003 They'll beg for mercy when we cover them in paperwork. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2004 I know these corporate raids pay better, but it's just not the same as before. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2005 Just who told you that the pen is mightier than the sword? 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2006 Against my wife, I require the power of one thousand attorneys. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2007 They're wearing their best weapons - law suits. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2008 The peasants filed a class action. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2009 When are you going to tell them there was no accident. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2010 Why did you show the master Pokémon GO? 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2011 I wonder if they will give us partner status. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2012 I picked them up from the doo dah parade in Pasadena. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2013 I really miss criminal law. It was so much less contentious. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2014 Yes law is cut-throat, but marauding is also litigious. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2015 I had no idea the Renaissance Faire was so popular among Republicans. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2016 When we ravish and pillage these days our camp followers are lawyers. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2017 Corporate raiding just isn't as exciting as pillaging and plundering. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2018 We're calling this the 'Red Tape Wedding.' 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2019 Well, have you ever tried a cab in the rush hour? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2020 And now they all want gluten-free rations. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2021 After the last raid, I felt I should lawyer up. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2022 Don't ask me what it means, just keep carrying the damned thing. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2023 This seems frivolous and without merit. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2024 This season on Game of Drones....... 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2025 I'm having some real misgivings about the army's new drone program. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2026 Are they waiting for one of us to have an accident? 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2027 I heard the Crusades are over budget. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2028 I'm still trying to decide: Fixed fee or hourly rate? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2029 Let's send tax and M&A on the left flank, saving the litigators for a charge down the middle. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2030 Did anyone tell them that there are only five openings to be filled? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2031 Let's hope they don't mess up on best picture again. 1.1379 0.06246 58 53 2 3
2032 How far to Wall Street? 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2033 ...at least we'll win on appeal. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2034 In the old days no one spent more on lawyers to sign a peace treaty than they did on weapons. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2035 Not scared of an audit? Ha! They've never seen an audit like this! 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2036 You can take them out of the 21st Century but what can you do with them? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2037 Legally, we're covered. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2038 You sure this was in 'The Art of War'? 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2039 Do you think this is what Attila meant about taking executive action? 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2040 All I know is Guais put #mbalemmings in his tweet. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2041 Sure we're good at it, but rounding up legal immigrants just isn't fun anymore. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2042 None fear Thor's gavel. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2043 Mattis to McMasters... When he gave us control of the Military, I didn't know he meant his legal team. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2044 They won't get us on a writ of mandamus this time. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2045 Ya think they keep their skirts in those little bags? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2046 Yes there victor gets the spoils but you need an army of accountants to keep it 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2047 Fear not, Samuelsson - they specialize in headcount reduction. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2048 Going to court isn't what it used to be. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2049 They may take our lives, but they'll never take... our businessmen. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2050 Do they still think we are the ones taking them to the employee retreat? 1.1379 0.06246 58 53 2 3
2051 You promised me a simple annihilation, not a complex negotiation. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2052 We looked just like'em when we started and now we get to wear these cool skirts in a macho kind of way. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2053 I said I'd rather be working with sails, not SALES! 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2054 Harvard, Shmarvard. At Stanford B school, I hear they wear flip-flops. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2055 Wharton has no leadership classes. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2056 Did you get a flat rate, or do these guys bill by the hour? 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2057 Remember the days when we could rape and pillage without the lawyers getting involved? 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2058 God damn it! I told you to get chainmail suits, not a chain of males in suits! 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2059 Two hundred are looking for hearts, one is looking for a Visa. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2060 Of course we have lawyers! It's the Age of Discovery. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2061 We live in two different worlds. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2062 They know Valhalla is the other way, right? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2063 Crusading lawyers. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2064 The 15th of April is coming. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2065 The Crusades were a lot more fun. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2066 Good thing they're only billing half rate for travel. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2067 And does the Chairman of the Horde have a strategic plan? 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2068 All I had to say was 'Synergy' and they all got in line. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2069 Suddenly, I'm out of lawyer jokes. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2070 A good defense isn't what it used to be. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2071 Seems like an awful lot of account executives for one crusade. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2072 Boring them to death is cruel and unusual punishment. I liked your wooden horse idea at Troy, better. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2073 Should we tell them we are on Sabbatical? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2074 If we lose the battle, we'll just sue the hell out of them. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2075 We’re taking them the long way b’cause I know the boss ain’t gonna like this special prosecutor team snooping through his taxes. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2076 We've come to depose your king! 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2077 Next time when Igor says he'll trade elk for sheep, get him to clarify. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2078 And all I am saying is that if you cut back on the pillaging a bit we wouldn't need the lawyers 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2079 We'll attack them in their pocketbooks, where it really counts. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2080 I warned you...you feed them once, and they follow you home. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2081 Due diligence be damned, let's just overrun the place. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2082 THIS is how you answer a temporary restraining order. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2083 This Will be a brief conflict. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2084 What is best in life? To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the liquidation of their assets. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2085 My accountants accopany me wherever I rape, pillage, and plunder. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2086 Call me old fashioned, but I don't think the forensic audit division has the fear factor we're looking for here. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2087 After we defeat them we'll audit them. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2088 An army of lawyers can never be conquered! 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2089 Tell me you paid your taxes. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2090 When did personal injury lawyers start outnumbering our soldiers ? 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2091 I like to let the legal boys loose on it before I conquer ANYWHERE , these days ... 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2092 Death, famine, war, conquest...all fine by me. It's the paperwork that's the real pain. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2093 I don't know about you but I'm not buying this 'pen is mightier than the sword' nonsense. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2094 Pillaging just isn't as fun anymore, now that we have to check with our army of lawyers on every little thing... 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2095 Sure we've got the right recruits? I suspect the HR guy favores the opposition... 1.1379 0.06246 58 53 2 3
2096 I used to love a good hostile takeover. 1.1379 0.06246 58 53 2 3
2097 Sure, they're pretty, but can they litigate? 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2098 So, instead of fighting, you think we should sue for peace? 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2099 They will hail the private equity Goths!! 1.1379 0.06713 58 54 0 4
2100 At least this time we know how long the journey will last: 9 to 5. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2101 Yes, we're barbarians, but isn't invading with certified financial planners a little too barbaric? 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2102 We're going to need a lot more than legal protection. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2103 What happened? I thought we signed up to be in Aida. 1.1379 0.06246 58 53 2 3
2104 I didn't mean 'drown the enemy in paperwork' literally. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2105 The new generation doesn't understand conquest, much less pillage. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2106 Not all stockbrokers need safe passage. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2107 I asked for an army of riders. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2108 The rape and pillage business isn't like it was when i was young... 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2109 We are soon to find out whether the pen is mightier than the sword. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2110 It's the awful monotony of slight variation that gets to me. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2111 To keep our funding we need diversity. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2112 i`d say this years recruits are rather composed 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2113 I thought we told them not to walk right behind the horses. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2114 Don't worry, they'll surrender when they see the bill. 1.1379 0.05741 58 52 4 2
2115 Say what you will about it only being 34%, but they really are loyal! 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2116 Pilaging a village has gotten to be so beuracratic these days. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2117 The Crusades used to be a lot more fun before all the paperwork. 1.1379 0.05188 58 51 6 1
2118 From the fiery depths of the CBO office, to the gates of the Capitol, men journeyed thousands of steps to deliver the one score to rule them all. 1.1379 0.04567 58 50 8 0
2119 I said "giddyup", not "lawyer up." 1.1373 0.04867 51 44 7 0
2120 The Visigoths are doomed--each one's packing a PowerPoint. 1.1346 0.05512 52 46 5 1
2121 At least they are good followers 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
2122 I fancy the one with the nose 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
2123 They appear to be well suited for battle. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
2124 I'm just saying that hostile takeovers seem to have lost some of their pizzazz. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
2125 Those idiots, I told them to send the horde not the board. 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
2126 Tell them Make the Empire Great Again and they'll follow you anywhere! 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
2127 I say pillaging and plundering isn't the same since the lawyers got involved 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
2128 Game of Drones 1.1296 0.04614 54 47 7 0
2129 I heard they only will attack between 9 and 5. 1.1296 0.05318 54 48 5 1
2130 Do you really think they know where to find Trump's tax returns? 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
2131 I've seen it. They can do more damage than 1,000 knights. 1.1296 0.05938 54 49 3 2
2132 Litigation's taken all the fun out of looting and pillaging 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2133 I'm getting tired of these legal battles. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2134 Litigation is more profitable than battle. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2135 Sure, Larry, the army of lawyers is intimidating, but maybe next time we mix in a few archers or something? 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2136 If these lawyers of yours can tie up their cavalry in writs and litigation, I think we can win this thing. 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2137 I miss the old school hostile takeovers. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2138 May they succumb to the rhetorical wrath of our legal team. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2139 Not that it's any of your bloody business, but I am leading them into temptation now that I have delivered them from evil. 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2140 I told you we shouldn't have deducted those spearheads! 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2141 Sometimes you should be careful when you follow the masses. The M is silent. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2142 Pokemon battle standard, uniform changes for the infantry...what's gotten into the Great Khan? 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2143 If any of these city slickers complain the pork is too salty, I'm done. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2144 The pay is better than Medieval Times and I convinced one of them to draft a will for me. 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2145 "Lawyering up" duty again. 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2146 'They're ok, although I find their healthcare bill a tad barbaric." 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2147 What say we rape and pillage the next village--I'm pretty sure no one will have a clue it's us. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2148 Remember the sweet spontaneous plundering before we had these lawyers? 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2149 We'll bury them with so many lawsuits they won't know what hit em. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2150 It's the latest trend in pillaging. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2151 I preferred it when they wore suits of armor. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2152 We'll tax them to death. 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2153 War used to be fun until the bar association got involved. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2154 Well you asked how many businessmen it takes to change a light bulb. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2155 IFRS 900! 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2156 First it was the middle ages now it's middle management. But I think our jobs are safe... 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2157 Burning down the village used to be enough. Now we also have to sue the bastards. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2158 That Mercenaries R Us ad was misleading. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2159 I think there was a mixup at the temp agency 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2160 And over here are the coffee machines. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2161 What's a lawsuit anyway? 1.1273 0.06385 55 51 1 3
2162 Into the valley of deregulation marched the 500. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2163 I love it! They'll fall for anything! 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2164 How far is it to the edge of the cliff? 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2165 I can't believe how easy this was. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2166 This will be the first legal crusade! 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2167 Pillaging has become so litigious. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2168 The pen is mightier than the sword ! 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2169 They may be docile now, but wait till we provide them with helmets. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2170 These business retreats are getting out of hand. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2171 This teach 'em not to criticize you-know-who on Twitter 1.1273 0.06385 55 51 1 3
2172 And this group is going to storm the castle? Really? 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2173 Do you really think we're ready for trial? 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2174 'This is not quite the defense force I expected to lead..." 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2175 I hope the Tribute is large enough for our ruler. I'm not sure this qualifies as 'the biggest Tribute, the best Tribute, the most amazing Tribute.' I mean, they're middle management. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2176 Corporate raiders, suited for battle, have a attaché cases, and will plunder, break it on down, 1,2, 3,4... 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2177 Summer interns are all the same. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2178 All these men ... just to handle the King's divorce. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2179 In my opinion, "The Best and the Brightest" is a recruitment slogan that needs tweaking. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2180 When we come to a bridge, they have to break stride and shift their briefcases to the other hand. 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2181 Yes winter may be coming, but that just means tax season is around the corner 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2182 Look, all I'm sayin' is I don't wanna be the guy whose head ends up on a stick when the FTC nixes this merger. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2183 Onward to the briefing! 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2184 I wish we could carry out just one raid without all of Legal tagging along! 1.1273 0.06385 55 51 1 3
2185 Tax week 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2186 Remember, we don't sue until we see the whites of their eyes. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2187 I plan on talking them to death. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2188 All I'm saying is is just not what it used to be... 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2189 How long until the laxatives kick in? 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2190 You had better be right about suing them into submission. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2191 Pillaging hasn't been the same since they hired all the consultants . 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2192 We're in arrears. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2193 Wall Street 9th Legion! 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2194 They're worth their weight in jokes. 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2195 Methinks we're not the only ones suited up for battle! 1.1273 0.04535 55 48 7 0
2196 The circus parade has new costumes! 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2197 Automation may have killed the office job, but there will always be a demand for guys on horses. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2198 Why do our slaves keep trying to sell us insurance? 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2199 Each year it gets more difficult to train the interns. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2200 The Emperor wants us to take them out West to harvest crops and work in the slaughterhouses. 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2201 I miss the old days when we could slaughter without the rules of engagement. 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2202 They call us the knights of equity 1.1273 0.05834 55 50 3 2
2203 Walking behind a horse in an Armani suit is not as dangerous as you might think. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2204 I'm just worried our expansion is being held back by an overly-cautious horde of directors. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2205 I miss the days when we could invade Russia without lawyering up. 1.1273 0.05225 55 49 5 1
2206 I don't know but I've been told Trump commodes are made of gold Sound off, 1, 2 1.1250 0.05734 56 51 3 2
2207 The annual "First Among Equals" parade. 1.1200 0.06154 50 46 2 2
2208 Their Wall won't stop our army of patent attorneys! 1.1200 0.04642 50 44 6 0
2209 You know, I'm not sure that we've got the hang of this Gang Audit thing. 1.1200 0.04642 50 44 6 0
2210 I'm still not sure this is what the king meant by 'bore them to death.' 1.1200 0.05451 50 45 4 1
2211 By the blood of the sky good, she's not getting the house. 1.1200 0.05451 50 45 4 1
2212 They will learn the suit is mightier then the sword 1.1200 0.05451 50 45 4 1
2213 They weren't subservient enough for Trump. 1.1200 0.05451 50 45 4 1
2214 They've advised us to sell the horses. 1.1200 0.05451 50 45 4 1
2215 ..........so now they follow a horse's arse. 1.1200 0.06154 50 46 2 2
2216 ...and thats why I dont eat airplane food. 1.1200 0.05451 50 45 4 1
2217 Let's go over this one more time. You're sure our orders said, "The first thing we do, let's capture all the lawyers. 1.1200 0.06154 50 46 2 2
2218 Don't you think we are following a bit too close ? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2219 When we unleash our legal team on these bastards, they're going to feel so pillaged and plundered. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2220 We can't lead them to our affordable neighborhood 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2221 The Siege is the best way to sell term life insurance 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2222 They're highly disciplined 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2223 Just like Modred to put us in charge of the insurance brigade 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2224 As a last resort, we unleash hell. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2225 We're Norsemen, why are yes men following us? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2226 Invasions were more fun before the lawyers got involved. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2227 Remember our new battle cry ... foreclose! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2228 Merlin's lawyers-into-lemmings spell is even better than his water into wine. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2229 I expect to be knighted. The King loves flash mobs. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2230 This parading lobbyists to Mar a Lago is getting silly! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2231 Pillaging just isn't the same anymore! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2232 It won't be easy showing these former regulators how to build a wall. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2233 So...where is it we are leading these lemmings to again? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2234 They didn't put up much of a fight. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2235 Must be a big case in King Arthur's Court. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2236 I told you this lawsuit was going to be hard to win 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2237 Now this is what I call a hostile takeover 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2238 Next week I'm heading the entrance of a quinceañera. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2239 On my mark, we charge. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2240 It’s come to this: Nowadays wars can’t be won without a brigade of lawyers. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2241 These aren't the White Walkers I was referring to in the war against humanity. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2242 The Romans made looting and sacking an art form and were the first to use the term "hostile takeover". 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2243 hay-dee, hay-dee, hi-dee ho . . . 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2244 At least we've got the numbers. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2245 Remember, first we storm the castle. Then, we gang-audit them. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2246 It's the kings new Bottom Lyin' Plan. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2247 I didn't know there was this much gray flannel on Earth. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2248 It's our new strategy -- the Art of Bore. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2249 looks like we are prepared for the IRS Audit 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2250 Based on our armament it should be a brief war. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2251 They sent lawyers. I would have preferred guns and money. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2252 I say Attila's lost the old fire. These days he doesn't make a move without an army of lawyers and accountants. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2253 Let's see how smug they are when our horde of barristers are at the gate. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2254 Trust me, they are more important than the 10, 000 archers. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2255 SHOO!" didn't work. Let's try "Right face, forward, MARCH! 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2256 Remember when we used to be able to rescue fair maidens without an army of lawyers in tow? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2257 I miss the days when we could let slip the dogs of war without consulting Risk Management. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2258 This new conflict resolution workshop feels a little extreme. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2259 Where's the fun anymore in raping and pillaging – if you've gotta bring so many damn lawyers? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2260 Don't worry Stu, after your first frapuccino you'll see it was all worth it. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2261 Are you sure he said "restraining orders" and not re-training orders?" 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2262 I take it the boss found out we referred to him as Attila the Hun? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2263 I bet those trousers feel better than this damn skirt. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2264 Did you see their PE ratio? I told you this onsite was going to be feudal. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2265 It's been a family business since 1095 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2266 I love the smell of after-shave in the morning. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2267 The Compound Interest Crusade 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2268 Back in the old days, we wouldn't have dreamed of using lawyers to drive the muslims out. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2269 These prisoners are so accountable 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2270 I don't know which I hate more--the Mongels or these suits. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2271 Suits! I ask for warriors, they send me suits! 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2272 When you're low on guns and money, you bring every lawyer you've got. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2273 Wars are not won by carnage alone! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2274 I HOPE OUR KING DOESN'T FORGET THE SHREDDER ! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2275 At last, a hostile takeover! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2276 We're gone viral. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2277 First, we'll foreclose on Winterfell. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2278 It’s the law firm of King, Arthur, and Schultz. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2279 Trump said it would be easy, Norgaard but this is ridiculous. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2280 When they said "army of lawyers", you're sure they meant that literally? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2281 Should we update our mission statement? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2282 Who knew that going to battle would become so brutally complicated? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2283 Have some civility, Eric. Plundering their city doesn't mean they don't have the right to an attorney. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2284 How much longer till we get to the sacrificial volcano? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2285 I'm getting damn sick and tired of these loyalty pledge meetings. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2286 I should've asked about the details of this internship before I said "yes." 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2287 I think we're being used. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2288 Everyone a briefcase, not a single one brought lunch! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2289 I have a nagging feeling I forgot to file my taxes. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2290 The emperor says he's filing for divorce... for all 50 of his wives. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2291 This is the problem with casual Fridays. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2292 HA HA HA! now that we have the attorneys on our side nothing can stop us! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2293 I see you forgot Formal Friday too. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2294 No accounting for the quirks of accountants. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2295 They worship disruption. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2296 Lawyered up, ready to roll. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2297 Never underestimate the Ka-Ching Dynasty! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2298 Brutus, you haven't ticked off your wife Caesar's sister lately have you? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2299 ... So that's when the King's son-in-law said, 'I need you to form an army of the bravest and sleaziest lawyers in the land'. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2300 See, I told you Russian Hacker Roundup duty isn't so bad. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2301 Do you think the English will settle out of court? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2302 Lawyers will follow the promise of mass casualties no matter how far. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2303 They will be defenseless against our army of lawyers 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2304 Genghis insists they will either scare or bore our enemies to death. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2305 Being a Hun used to be a gas. Now it's nothing but lawsuits. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2306 I'd say it's rare. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2307 You know, there was a time when you could crush your enemies, drive them before you, and hear the lamentations of their women without any legal representation at all. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2308 Lots of interest in the King's Humpty Dumpty situation 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2309 Couldn't we just use a mobile app for this? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2310 This Trojan horse is perfect, no one wants to be a banker in this day and age. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2311 Who is this Joe Smith we are looking for? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2312 And this is only the 1 percent of our army. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2313 History may record this as the Great Company Man March; but mark my words, electronic devices are going to replace those brief cases. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2314 I'm guessing the media will refer to this as a "hostile takeover." 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2315 I think we can lose them during their next recess. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2316 I thought they said we'd have to work "nights" on occasion. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2317 At least no one is out of step. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2318 They think the people in our land pay no taxes. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2319 Did you hear about the new pillage and plunder tax? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2320 I understand "slash and burn." I don't get "finicky negotiation." 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2321 Do you really think that an army of lawyers is the right way to approach this? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2322 So sue me, he says laughing. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2323 I sure hope this really IS a brief crusade. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2324 I'm lawyering up prior to my testimony before the Roman senate. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2325 You think they heard "business man" when I asked for "battering ram"? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2326 We have five bureaucrats backing up every soldier! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2327 Bet ya 50 bucks I can beat you to the stable. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2328 Are you sure Attila said 'Bring me their corporate heads' and not 'corporal heads?' 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2329 These prisoners are useless. All they do is sue each other. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2330 And what's in it for us? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2331 Ok, I get it--time to defund the bureaucracy! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2332 No matter how long you cook it, dear, your work will never be well done... 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2333 The future is upon us. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2334 (blank) 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2335 This was a lot more enjoyable when we didn't care about liability. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2336 Litigation sure beats slaughtering and pillaging. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2337 We gotta come up with a better name than "The Gray Flannel Horde." 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2338 I think we drank the wrong Kool-Aid 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2339 "Wait till they find out we don't wear boxers, or briefs, in this outfit"! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2340 Litigation is not bloodless. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2341 You know, pillaging isn’t as much fun as it used to be since they let lawyers enlist. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2342 "Unaccountable", am I? Let's see how accountable they are! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2343 When do we let them know that this isn't an episode of "The Apprentice?" 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2344 This is what I get with a "suit up" command? 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2345 Collecting taxes isn't what it used to be.... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2346 With all that plundering and slaughter, it's no wonder we've got to respond to so many lawsuits. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2347 I never think of it as a "9 to 5" job. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2348 I bet they surrender at the first suggestion of an audit. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2349 I don't mean to anger the gods, but, in all honesty, I think three Spartans would kick our ass. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2350 Everyone is lawyering up. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2351 Boy, marathon attire sure has changed! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2352 Raiding Corporations! Excellent plunder at a low cost per employee. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2353 It tests their ability to deal with horseshit from a real horse's ass. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2354 They can't tell the difference between this and the NASDAQ. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2355 I just don't get why all the other Shephard's laughed at us. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2356 Middle management is too cut throat. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2357 With the 401K recruitment has gone off the charts. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2358 Do you ever get the feeling that someone is following you? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2359 I had no idea there were so many CPAs in the kingdom! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2360 You go to war with the army of lawyers you have, not the army of lawyers you want. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2361 I thought people said to learn from history, I guess not. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2362 The king requested their presence at his inauguration, to ensure it looked well attended. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2363 Eliot, is our corporate leadership getting weird, or it just me? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2364 We forgot to ask them who their tailor is. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2365 In the name of the army of Ernst & Young, I command thee to surrender! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2366 You know Milton, burn, rape and pillage seemed a lot more fun before the lawyers got involved. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2367 They'll never know what hit 'em. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2368 English majors looking for employment. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2369 Tell me again what's a corporate raid? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2370 They say battles will be fought in the boardrooms. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2371 House Bolton is no match for the firm of Silverman, Shapiro & Strauss 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2372 H&R Block really doesn't care what happens to them after April. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2373 They're the best but PR for Gengis is a tough gig 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2374 My son, the first rule of war is lawyer up. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2375 You should see the bunch my wife is bringing. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2376 They may not look formidable, but with their plundering skills we can rule the known world. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2377 I can't wait to see the look on their faces when all they'll have is weapons! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2378 I've been thinkin, Igor: If his highness needs this many lawyers, are we too in trouble? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2379 This ought to be interesting. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2380 'In this case, we should have told them to dress for the job they have' 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2381 Remember when that was us? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2382 The War on Coal is getting serious. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2383 The first thing we do, let's kill all the investment bankers. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2384 They thought I said "give me minions"!! 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2385 It’ll get interesting. Gave the horses a bucket of green apples. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2386 Why do they keep asking for a limo? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2387 Simon what did you say to them?" "All I said was...follow suit. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2388 That's what I like about working for HR: the pointless death marches. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2389 I just want to be prepared in case it turns into a legal battle 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2390 I gotta hand it to Jack from marketing. Re-branding the Imperialist Regime of Slavery as the IRS really gave us the "following" we deserve. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2391 And then all of a sudden I realized: who better for plundering than lawyers? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2392 I'm beginning to wonder if hearing the lamentations of their women is really worth all the paperwork 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2393 We're definitely being followed! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2394 They said to prepare for a legal battle. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2395 In my day, this would not have been considered a hostile takeover attempt! 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2396 I think that we've gone forward to the past. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2397 Just in case my tweets offend... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2398 Sure, the Great Khan told us to kill everyone in the city except beautiful maidens and fine craftsmen, but what does he want 7,000 attorneys for? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2399 Pillaging is not the same with the lawyers constantly looking over your shoulder. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2400 When we get to battle, yell 'Warren Buffet downgraded these guys!" & get outta the way. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2401 Our plan is to bore them to death. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2402 This expansion of The Auditing Empire is taking a lot longer than planned. Too much red tape. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2403 It's going to be the best sale of the year! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2404 We have a good chance if winning this battle, but don't expect the poets to sing your praises. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2405 Pillaging with in-house counsel might work better, but it just don't satisfy. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2406 They want to learn plundernomics! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2407 We are here to settle the dispute over our account. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2408 Make Mar-A-Lago great again 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2409 Do they have collapsible swords in those boxes they're carrying or what? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2410 I still think it was a mistake to recruit these weekend warriors to fight on a Wednesday. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2411 Just wait until Apple sees my Super Bowl ad. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2412 Wall Street, Dave. Where else would you lead 600,000 Bisrealites? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2413 The king says he wants to choose an accountant who comes from a long line of accountants. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2414 Are we there yet? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2415 OK, run it up the flagpole and see who salutes, wins. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2416 The modern hostile takeover? BORING! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2417 Othar, apparently you misunderstood me. I said I wanted an army of real MADmen, not ADmen. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2418 Well, you said you were the lead attorney. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2419 New recruitment tour 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2420 Where's that Hamelin guy when you need him? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2421 "Are they in for a surprise, I told them we're having 'S'moors' for dessert"! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2422 Because auditors are more terrifying than archers. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2423 Here we go. I see the red tape. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2424 The enemy ran in terror when they saw our army of lawyers. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2425 Maybe they'll win us a kingdom, but - and you can call me old fashioned - the click of a brief case will never stir my blood like the ring of clashing swords. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2426 This really is a long walk to the parking lot. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2427 Clearly there's a big difference between a march on Washington and a march from Washington. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2428 The game of clones 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2429 I'm still not sold on going into war with an 'army of lawyers'. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2430 So when the Orcs attack we simply unleash the red tape 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2431 I figure we can always use one more lawyer. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2432 I got my start organizing teen tours. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2433 I think we should turn off location services. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2434 It’s great to have the legal team with us. Maybe we’ll win one for a change 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2435 None of them has a bona fide tie to us 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2436 How is MY fault 'retain' and 'capture' are the same word in our language? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2437 Donald Trump has been doing it for decades, just litigate them to death! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2438 Did you see how the news reported us as white knights in the takeover? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2439 It turns out attorneys are great sacrificial victims. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2440 We'll destroy them with lawsuits! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2441 Who dressed the extras for this flick? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2442 I liked battle better when the suits were of armor and we hanged all the lawyers. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2443 Not what I meant by 'suit up'... 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2444 Do you think they're still following us? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2445 I think we've skirted the dress code. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2446 Well, you tell me! I made it in shop class. Spare parts, you know? By the time the bell rang, something activated ! 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2447 I long for the days when a hostile takeover didn't involve all these lawyers. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2448 They may be bored, but they haven't got saddle-sores. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2449 When I said mind your own business, this is not what I had in mind! 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2450 Did you job description also said "Lead army of warriors"? 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2451 It doesn't have a name - it's the only shape they could agree on. 1.1176 0.06037 51 47 2 2
2452 I knew that reinforcements would be necessary once they passed the new tax bill. 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2453 And they think we are berserk. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2454 Don't look Bannon but are the still behind us? 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2455 Well, I think we should call it 'Hadrian's Glass Ceiling.' 1.1176 0.05348 51 46 4 1
2456 Maybe. But I am not sure numerical superiority is everything. 1.1176 0.04556 51 45 6 0
2457 "Going Viking" for the 3,000,000 votes. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
2458 They say if it dosen't open, don't eat it 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
2459 Everyone stop!!!! I need to go to the bathroom. 1.1154 0.04474 52 46 6 0
2460 Reince, you're fired! 1.1154 0.05249 52 47 4 1
2461 They think they are getting the key to the Executive Washroom. 1.1087 0.04640 46 41 5 0
2462 Now days its all about the accountants. 1.1064 0.05470 47 43 3 1
2463 Nowadays it's not the size of your army that counts but the size of your law firm. 1.1064 0.05470 47 43 3 1
2464 War used to be action, not litigation. 1.1064 0.04546 47 42 5 0
2465 I told you not to sue. 1.1064 0.05470 47 43 3 1
2466 Hark! Ye are about to be hoisted on your own audit! 1.1064 0.05470 47 43 3 1
2467 Do you think he will build a wall to keep the auditors away? 1.1064 0.05470 47 43 3 1
2468 I'm still not completely sold on this "army of attorneys" strategy. 1.1064 0.05470 47 43 3 1
2469 Selling door-to-door has become a lot more dangerous this year! 1.1064 0.05470 47 43 3 1
2470 Genghis will not like the new uniforms 1.1064 0.04546 47 42 5 0
2471 I am Genghis and these are my Khan-men. 1.1064 0.05470 47 43 3 1
2472 We will sue them into submission 1.1064 0.04546 47 42 5 0
2473 Sure, Genghis does pretty well with his archers, but no one can match the weaponry of Litigious Khan. 1.1064 0.04546 47 42 5 0
2474 If the negotiators fail, be ready with my crossbow. 1.1064 0.05470 47 43 3 1
2475 They walk in pairs to fudge their numbers. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2476 THIS IS WHAT FEAR IS ALL ABOUT. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2477 Think of the gas savings! 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2478 Bear with me, we will finally learn the truth. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2479 Thought I'd better lawyer up. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2480 I understand that they steal with their pens, but how are you supposed to pillage with a briefcase? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2481 So much for your dumbass idea about Team Building: "We Khan do it! We Khan do it! We Khan do it!" 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2482 The slave trader told me these guys all have "killer instincts", but I just don't see it... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2483 Think this audit is gonna be tough. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2484 They prefer to walk. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2485 I am always amazed at how many lawyers it takes to negotiate an unconditional surrender! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2486 Tonight on Hannity..... "Trump keeps yet another promise by draining the swamp of those pesky fake scientists. See ya losers" 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2487 We're on a crusade to retake Wall Street. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2488 You just had to say "the pen is mightier than the sword" in front of our commander in chief who thinks war is "Capture the Flag"! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2489 It was your idea to advertise the crusade as a "great career move and a chance to obliterate your enemies" 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2490 Personally, I think tax collectors should carry maces. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2491 Another fine mess you've gotten us into Ollie. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2492 Didn't I tell you that Sun Tzu would pay off? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2493 First we rape. Then we pillage. Then we audit. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2494 Conquering the world on horseback is easy; it is dismounting and governing that is hard. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2495 Their hourly rates are going to kill us 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2496 King Trump's army is easy to lead, but I do miss the women.... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2497 I always like to 'lawyer-up' before I go into battle. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2498 Tell me again, what is a cyber war? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2499 Where should we stop for lunch? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2500 Do you think they'll be upset when they find we sold the rights to the Game of Thrones sequel? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2501 Mueller's subpoenas won't get to where these blabbermouths are going. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2502 That "terms and conditions" document doesn't stand a chance! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2503 I think we are ready for the audit. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2504 We are here just to get their attention. The boys will do the dirty work... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2505 Wait until they find out that there are no bonuses in the "standard" we bear. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2506 If the siege engines don't convince them to surrender, the lawyers will. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2507 I said WARRIORS but the king heard LARRIORS! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2508 They march well, but shout poorly. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2509 We came, we saw, we settled out of court. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2510 Although the Dothraki's have mounted calvary, we have the Suited Writs. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2511 I have my doubts about this nation-building mission. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2512 I told the recruiter we were hiring for a hostile takeover. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2513 Maybe Attilla wont show up 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2514 I guess he was serious about the whole "10,000 men" thing. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2515 Who would have ever guessed we would lead an army of hackers. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2516 Did they say accounts payable or accounts slayable? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2517 Well, I guess you can't be too picky when it comes to the draft. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2518 I've been planning this corporate hostile takeover for years 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2519 This turned into a litigious Kingdom. I can remember when pillaging and plundering were misdemeanors. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2520 They all think their unique. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2521 I asked for an army of warriors. How are these guys going to conquer the world? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2522 They won't be expecting us being this well lawyered up. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2523 Don't worry about it! It'll happen! The Eden Gates will open, and they can beat their briefcases into plowshares, and their cellphones into pruning hooks, and never again have to worry about losing their jobs or the cost of healthcare. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2524 We don't stand a chance, Otis, but we sure as hell will know how much it cost... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2525 A legion of lawyers is scarier than an army of soldiers. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2526 The King needs them to figure out his tax return. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2527 I told you that team-building at the Renaissance Festival wouldn't go over well. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2528 I had no idea this is what the MBA brochure meant when it said, "Pomp and Circumstance" at graduation. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2529 Yes, but replacing the Golden Horde with lawyers reduces our liability premiums by 15 percent. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2530 What are these guys supposed to do, insure them to death? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2531 Let's see the Huns crunch numbers with these guys! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2532 the suit crusade 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2533 First we kill, then we bury in paperwork. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2534 I just realized that I forgot the password! 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2535 They love you, these people really love you. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2536 Re-routing, re-routing, re-rout.... sorry, I don't understand where "American Dream" is. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2537 While they're more efficient than the old horde at laying waste to all in our path, I miss the singing. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2538 I gave them their marching orders. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2539 These merger meetings have gotten totally out of hand. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2540 Wow , these states' attorney generals are really on some kind of crusade to protect their voting data! 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2541 After the Children's Crusade, I wanted to experiment in more conceptual art. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2542 Wait till the Lannisters see us! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2543 Onward, corporate soldiers 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2544 I TOLD YOU WE'D BE GREAT AGAIN. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2545 In the North, those beleaguered few marched on in defense of the Wall. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2546 It's the litagaters who are fiercest at man-to-man battle. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2547 As strategic board retreats go, this one has been pretty quiet. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2548 I hate these trade wars. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2549 Once we reach the castle the twitter storm commences! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2550 Lawyering up just doesn't feel like the Hun's way. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2551 I don't think the new Head of Recruiting understands our globalization plan. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2552 They said they wanted new leadership... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2553 We'll infiltrate the CPAs the usual way, but I like the idea of getting the lawyers over the wall with catapults. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2554 They licensed the merchandising rights for the Crusades. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2555 Strategy and planning is one thing; but can they fight? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2556 Genghis Khan Steinberg and Manischewitz look to open their first office in Mongolia. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2557 Your doctor's credentials say he has an MD in IPA. Any idea what that means? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2558 I thought we were Saxons, not Goldman Sachs. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2559 My horoscope said I would lead a great army on a hostile takeover. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2560 Just promise them big jobs and they will follow you anywhere. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2561 You want to take over the world? You're going to need accountants... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2562 We brought specialists in both mergers and hostile takeovers. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2563 I thought they might come in handy on the off chance I can't pull the sword from the stone. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2564 When they see us coming they'll bail. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2565 They can't beat our army of lawyers. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2566 Dammit, I told you MBA does not stand for "Massive Battle Axe!" 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2567 Next time don't advertise for "road warriors." 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2568 Leading a crusade in the patent wars doesn't have the same feel. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2569 Why would the king be 'lawyering up' if he was't guilty? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2570 Are you sure 100,000 accountants can defeat the Huns? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2571 His tweet said they were the best plunderers. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2572 How much do their bitcoins weigh? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2573 When I told you to get me an army of vanquishers, I meant soldiers, not lawyers. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2574 Do you feel like we're being followed? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2575 When he sees these sorry looking warriors, Beowulf is going to rip our arms out. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2576 Now we are ready to pass the health care bill. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2577 Raiding was a lot more fun before the government got involved. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2578 The passing the bar faster than we can march them into the yearly "negotiation" with the Huns. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2579 Make way for the IRS 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2580 Spare no one an audit. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2581 Because nothing beats an army of lawyers. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2582 We'll need to massage some details when we write this up in Exodus. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2583 "History is written by the victors," right? So let's leave a few details out. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2584 If they'd let Cuomo strengthen his authority over the MTA, we might not be in this mess. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2585 Do you like your case rare? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2586 I love crucifying lawyers. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2587 These battles are getting too litigious to be any fun. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2588 This is our third crossing. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2589 I still can't believe we lost all our armour to lawsuits. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2590 What is this 'Tinder' thing you told them about? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2591 Make sure you get them into the new uniforms before we present them to Emperor Trump. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2592 Could you stop whistling that tune already? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2593 I think we have captured more than the Top 1 Percent... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2594 Why pillage and plunder when you can bill 'em by the hour? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2595 This siege is gonna be a doozy for the king to have us THIS lawyered up! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2596 I felt it's time to lawyer up. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2597 Couldn't his highness have just used H&R Block? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2598 the protection of the disenfranchised top 1% 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2599 Like lambs to the slaughter. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2600 We will march the lawyers until the filing, and then they bill. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2601 Not Found The requested URL /wp-content/uploads/2017/07/170703_contest-690.jpg was not found on this server. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2602 At my signal, unleash hell. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2603 They say, "The affidavit is mightier than the sword." 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2604 They think we're bad, wait 'til they meet our lawyers. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2605 I said more torture, not torts 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2606 Game of Drones 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2607 I didn't really understand the power of the "lawyer-up" marching formation. I feel quite safe, even in a hostile kingdom... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2608 Sure we captured a ton of them, but what can the Zombies do? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2609 Never fear men: the briefcase is mightier than the sword. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2610 I like our odds. No fortress can withstand an army of lawyers. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2611 I think the Pope is overdoing it with this Inquisition audit 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2612 I wonder why they call 'em lemmings? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2613 If we can't get them out, we'll overregulate them out. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2614 Apparently they're savage in battle. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2615 First, we take his tax forms. Then we release the troops. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2616 At least we filled the positions 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2617 "An army 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2618 When I told them to suit up this is not what I had in mind 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2619 I miss the days when just the sight of us made men weep. Now it takes an army of lawyers. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2620 Too bad we didn't retire a little sooner. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2621 Annexing territory isn't fun anymore with Mergers and Acquisitions tagging along! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2622 My ex got my castle with just one, we have enough to take a whole country. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2623 I miss the good old days when you could just pillage and plunder without all the suits. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2624 Okay, men, let us go rape, pillage, and LITIGATE! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2625 Are you sure we're supposed to handle white collar crimes? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2626 I forgot we're are we going? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2627 If nothing else, we have them outnumbered 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2628 Remember to hold your calculators until you see the whites of their eyes! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2629 The Corpathian Horde marches onward. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2630 Exactly who is going to tell all of them that around here, MBA means "Major Battle Activity"? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2631 We'll come in tough, and then sue'm for all they got. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2632 Attack them? We're gonna sue them. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2633 I thought this was the intersectionality march. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2634 You asked for an army of diplomats and you got an army of diplomats! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2635 A recent poll indicates that 90% of them want to wear outfits like ours! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2636 The two in front said something about passing the bar, so we're taking them to the tavern. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2637 I need all my lawyers. Have you ever negotiated a treaty with Atilla? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2638 I guess you were right, we can conquer the world with an army of lawyers. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2639 I miss the days before the lawyers turned our battles into legal battles... 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2640 Are you sure our orders were to organize a Deduction of the enemy's works? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2641 Remember, we want a 15-percent raise plus overtime pay. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2642 To the victor go the spoiled. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2643 Eat shit, you monster. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2644 We will bore our enemies to their death. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2645 Things never change. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2646 I believe they are marching in Steppes. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2647 The first thing we do, let's take all the lawyers as prisoners. Then we sue the Golden Horde for punitive damages! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2648 There's the cliff!..... you go left, I go right, and goodbye suits. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2649 I miss the good old days of takeovers. The looting and pillaging. I hate these corporate lawyers. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2650 Whose idea was it to "lawyer up", anyway? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2651 do we count every grain of sand? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2652 We came, we saw, we negotiated our surrender. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2653 So while the front line goes to mediation, I say we go find a beer. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2654 The emperor is furious, he is sending in the lawyers. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2655 I remember when you could go into battle without an army of lawyers. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2656 Are they suppose to cheer when we take their hostages? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2657 Worse than this, PwC won't let them use cellphones backstage anymore. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2658 Rush hour started getting worse around 1206. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2659 He told us to round up people who worked on Wall. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2660 They call themselves mid-century modern crusaders. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2661 Onward Christian accountants 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2662 After the "lawyering up" I guess we go back to parking cars at mar-a-lago. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2663 How the beasts groan! The herds of cattle wander aimlessly Because there is no pasture for them 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2664 Work harder, for lower pay - and you will get to heaven. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2665 One day the Litigious Legions of Trump will be legendary. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2666 Well at least it's a step up from 'cooking the books' 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2667 Audit is coming. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2668 No more mister nice guy. Here come the lawyers 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2669 The strategy is to shock and awe the enemy with bad lawyer jokes. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2670 I hate these legal battles! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2671 We're storming them with class action litigation. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2672 Remember when we used to just lead sheep to the slaughter. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2673 I hope we brought enough lawyers. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2674 I'd say this year's company retreat really reflects the boss' new management style. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2675 I'll teach them Dungeons and Dragons. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2676 This hoard of insurance salesman and attorneys will cause a panic and mass reteat of the enemy. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2677 Don't worry, an army of lawyers will scare any enemy. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2678 Ok. I agree.There are no toilets in this direction. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2679 I don't know what they want. They just said they wanted to follow a new leader 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2680 I expected more from companies called Centurion, Phalanx, and Vanguard. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2681 It's time to pin the back end sales projections for next quarter. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2682 What a bunch of tools. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2683 It's about time the king was audited. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2684 For the last time, Zevon's bringing the money, Phillip is bringing the guns and we're on the hook for the lawyers! 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2685 I don't know why you can't find full-time work in crisis cults. In my day, we didn't even have a treeless deathscape. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2686 We've got a lot of work to do... 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2687 Maybe we should ask them where they are going. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2688 I think we're being subpeonaed. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2689 I lawyered up, why do you ask? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2690 Holy sale, holy bail, holy grail...whatever 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2691 Time to fire up the PowerPoint! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2692 I'd like to see 'em beat us this time. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2693 I'm pretty sure we should be leading a horde of barbarians...not barristers! 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2694 Damn, the subway's out again. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2695 The Oscars? Whatever is that? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2696 Compliance...Ragnar...compliance! 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2697 These aren't my troops. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2698 I still enjoy the pillaging, but I miss the raping. 1.1042 0.06131 48 45 1 2
2699 They said they're looking for jobs, any job. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2700 How many divorces does this make? 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2701 Weekl what if they don't want to negotiate? Have you thought of that? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2702 I would say the hostile takeover was a resounding success. 1.1042 0.04456 48 43 5 0
2703 Give me the good old days without lawyers. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2704 What'll we do with 100,000 CPA's? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2705 I hope we get a reward for leading them back to their homeland of New York. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2706 It's really hard to conquer and pillage, these days, without racking up countless lawsuits. 1.1042 0.05359 48 44 3 1
2707 Remember, back in our youth, when we were convinced the cause we were leading was just? 1.1042 0.05359 48 44