Contest #552


Cartoon

552


Name Value
Submission deadline -
Voting started 2017-01-09
Voting ended -
Finalists announced -
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued 2017-01-22 (estimated)
Number of captions 5437
Number of responses 519548
Number of participants 16935


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Long time no sea. 1.9681 0.02172 1410 492 471 447
1 Long time no sea. 1.9124 0.02757 913 360 273 280
2 Noah, trust me. Its over. 1.6852 0.04711 305 166 69 70
3 Do I LOOK like I have any Grey Poupon? 1.6581 0.04485 313 170 80 63
4 I'm losing confidence in Google Maps too. 1.6526 0.04263 308 158 99 51
5 No thanks; I get seasick. 1.6445 0.04477 301 163 82 56
6 Thanks, but I get sea sick. 1.6254 0.04425 283 151 87 45
7 Have you seen two guys and a drum majorette? 1.6223 0.04879 278 164 55 59
8 You may not think so, but we're in the same boat. 1.6154 0.04443 273 146 86 41
9 Thanks, but I'd just slow you down. 1.6148 0.04358 270 141 92 37
10 Well, you do have to admit he was one heck of a salesman. 1.6105 0.04368 267 140 91 36
11 Are you nuts? I'm not getting in that thing without a life vest! 1.6054 0.04800 261 150 64 47
12 I see you're still denying climate change. 1.6054 0.04891 261 153 58 50
13 Michael, you have completely misinterpreted the lyrics. 1.5991 0.05309 217 127 50 40
14 Actually, we're in the same boat. 1.5936 0.04631 251 139 75 37
15 The next time a genie offers us a wish, let me do the talking, O.K.? 1.5922 0.04741 255 146 67 42
16 Working on your heat stroke? 1.5904 0.04765 249 142 67 40
17 Actually, I do think you're in the same boat that I'm in. 1.5870 0.04798 247 142 65 40
18 Thanks, but we're already in the same boat. 1.5870 0.04764 247 141 67 39
19 On your mark, get set... 1.5837 0.04866 245 143 61 41
20 Do you believe in climate change NOW?! 1.5826 0.04737 242 137 69 36
21 I don't think a dry run was a good idea. 1.5826 0.04700 242 136 71 35
22 You're not from around here, are you? 1.5774 0.04599 239 132 76 31
23 You're ashore, already Michael, you're ashore. 1.5738 0.05002 237 142 54 41
24 Yeah, so water gets drawn out in a tsunami. So what? 1.5738 0.05178 237 147 44 46
25 I've had enough of your dry humor. 1.5696 0.04672 237 134 71 32
26 Let's consider this a dry run 1.5672 0.04504 238 131 79 28
27 This is what happens when you drain the swamp. 1.5671 0.05073 231 140 51 40
28 I thought it was just going to be a problem for like, polar bears. 1.5671 0.04998 231 138 55 38
29 No, I didn't call for an Uber. 1.5600 0.04786 225 129 66 30
30 Now hallucinate some water. 1.5600 0.04949 225 133 58 34
31 You do realize that throwing me overboard does not change our situation? 1.5541 0.05045 222 134 53 35
32 'We should go off season' you said. 'It's half the price and there's no crowds.' 1.5520 0.04814 221 128 64 29
33 After my dune buggy flipped, I never thought I'd be rescued. 1.5463 0.04722 216 123 68 25
34 I hope you realize you're completely neglecting your lower body. 1.5421 0.04893 214 126 60 28
35 It's not as deep as I thought 1.5377 0.04884 212 125 60 27
36 Michael, you've already rowed the boat ashore. 1.5359 0.05120 209 128 50 31
37 It's not as deep as it looks. 1.5359 0.04748 209 120 66 23
38 I said to get us an off road vehicle, not an oft rowed one! 1.5314 0.05115 207 127 50 30
39 Stop saying "on your left." 1.5291 0.04946 206 123 57 26
40 For God's sake, please stop yelling 'man overboard!'. 1.5291 0.05088 206 126 51 29
41 It's a lot warmer once you get in. 1.5248 0.05308 202 128 42 32
42 If you let me in the boat we can use the HOV lane. 1.5243 0.04851 206 122 60 24
43 No, YOU'RE a mirage 1.5227 0.05580 176 110 40 26
44 One of us is in the wrong cartoon. 1.5217 0.05117 207 129 48 30
45 You have the whole desert...did you have to row right where I'm swimming? 1.5156 0.05115 192 117 51 24
46 You say "But it's a dry heat" one more time... 1.5150 0.05256 200 127 43 30
47 I don't tell you how to row so stop telling me how to swim. 1.5128 0.04951 195 117 56 22
48 You know we're in the same boat, figuratively speaking. 1.5128 0.05004 195 118 54 23
49 I am pretty sure the shark problem is behind us. 1.5127 0.04860 197 117 59 21
50 You don't throw your navigator out for one little mistake! 1.5126 0.05325 199 128 40 31
51 I find your optimism disturbing. 1.5115 0.05452 174 108 43 23
52 I think this is a case of either oar 1.5103 0.05180 194 121 47 26
53 One of us is in the wrong cartoon. 1.5103 0.05282 194 123 43 28
54 Maybe we shouldn't have drained the swamp. 1.5103 0.05129 194 120 49 25
55 On your left! 1.5077 0.05312 195 125 41 29
56 I'm here to tell you an inconvenient truth. 1.5054 0.05185 186 115 48 23
57 Don't blame me, I voted for Al Gore. 1.5052 0.05427 192 125 37 30
58 We're duned. 1.5052 0.05181 194 122 46 26
59 I was hoping for a better hallucination. 1.5052 0.04750 194 114 62 18
60 The guy in the kayak is about two hours ahead of you. 1.5026 0.04688 191 111 64 16
61 Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily my ass. 1.5026 0.05549 191 127 32 32
62 No, YOU'RE a mirage 1.5000 0.05264 190 121 43 26
63 You can stop rowing, Michael. We're ashore. 1.5000 0.05253 188 119 44 25
64 I followed Siri. What's your excuse? 1.5000 0.05143 188 117 48 23
65 Next time you have a choice, pick the camels. 1.5000 0.05232 194 124 43 27
66 Thank you for coming to rescue me 1.5000 0.05253 188 119 44 25
67 Are you just going to leave me here to drown!? 1.5000 0.05103 190 118 49 23
68 Merrily, merrily my ass! 1.5000 0.05157 190 119 47 24
69 Aw, man, right through my sand castle. 1.5000 0.05031 188 115 52 21
70 You're up a paddle without a creek. 1.5000 0.05433 194 128 35 31
71 One more Merrily, Merrily and you're a dead man. 1.4973 0.05108 187 116 49 22
72 Thank goodness you showed up. I've been treading water all day. 1.4973 0.05328 187 120 41 26
73 Do I LOOK like I have any Grey Poupon? 1.4973 0.05164 187 117 47 23
74 Watch your wake, buddy! 1.4945 0.05094 182 112 50 20
75 I still think a gym membership would've been better. 1.4892 0.05240 186 119 43 24
76 I don't care what Google Maps says! 1.4892 0.05184 186 118 45 23
77 I told you a camel would be a better investment! 1.4892 0.04896 186 113 55 18
78 Seriously, you're my Uber? 1.4891 0.05283 184 118 42 24
79 I told you that was a stupid third wish. 1.4890 0.05550 182 121 33 28
80 I don't believe in global warming either. 1.4890 0.04850 182 109 57 16
81 So this is what you meant about a dry run. 1.4890 0.05094 182 113 49 20
82 We are not going anywhere until I find that lens. 1.4890 0.05212 182 115 45 22
83 What do you mean, there's a weight limit? 1.4862 0.05114 181 113 48 20
84 I didn't think he would really drain the swamp. 1.4862 0.05349 181 117 40 24
85 I can't. I get seasick. 1.4862 0.04993 181 111 52 18
86 Give it up, Michael. You are ashore. 1.4833 0.05429 180 118 37 25
87 I know you said it was a dry run. 1.4804 0.05094 179 112 48 19
88 Well, we drained the Swamp... 1.4804 0.05393 179 117 38 24
89 You aren't from around here are you? 1.4804 0.05451 179 118 36 25
90 Have you seen a majorette leading a marching band? 1.4804 0.05451 179 118 36 25
91 Can’t you see we’re in the same boat? 1.4804 0.05155 179 113 46 20
92 But it's a dry heat. 1.4804 0.05216 179 114 44 21
93 No, no. You've got it backward. I'M supposed to wander here for forty years. YOU'RE supposed to wait until it rains for forty days and forty nights. 1.4778 0.05134 180 114 46 20
94 I'm telling you Pete, we were going faster when I was in the boat making motor noises 1.4775 0.05052 178 111 49 18
95 Yeah, I think I see land, too. 1.4773 0.05342 176 114 40 22
96 No! You come in on 'Merrily, merrily!' 1.4773 0.05220 176 112 44 20
97 Make that row versus wade joke one more time and you'll be sorry! 1.4773 0.05403 176 115 38 23
98 Michael, you've rowed your boat ashore. You can stop now. 1.4743 0.05303 175 113 41 21
99 Who drained the swamp? 1.4743 0.05426 175 115 37 23
100 Permission to come aboard? 1.4743 0.05049 175 109 49 17
101 Say "merrily" one more time. I dare you. 1.4743 0.05365 175 114 39 22
102 If it weren't for global warming, I would have drowned! 1.4743 0.04984 175 108 51 16
103 No. We're not all in the same boat! 1.4713 0.05262 174 112 42 20
104 Is that a sun stroke? 1.4713 0.05387 174 114 38 22
105 Maybe it's time to admit that we're lost. 1.4713 0.05262 174 112 42 20
106 Thanks for the offer, but I get seasick. 1.4686 0.05047 175 110 48 17
107 At least it's a dry heat. 1.4686 0.04711 175 105 58 12
108 I can't find your stupid contact lens! Can I get back in the boat now! 1.4655 0.05197 174 112 43 19
109 Merrily, merrily, merrily, my ass. 1.4651 0.05369 172 113 38 21
110 "Would you stop humming the music to Jaws for God's sake! 1.4651 0.04975 172 107 50 15
111 Michael, you've rowed your boat ashore. 1.4647 0.05480 170 113 35 22
112 I hate to break it to you, but the 'ship of the desert' is a camel. 1.4647 0.04946 170 105 51 14
113 Thanks, but I'm makin' pretty good time. 1.4647 0.04946 170 105 51 14
114 He sure drained the swamp fast. 1.4647 0.05606 170 115 31 24
115 You think you're hallucinating? I'm drowning here! 1.4620 0.05518 171 115 33 23
116 This is nothing. In the 70's I traveled through this area on a horse with no name. 1.4615 0.05308 169 110 40 19
117 No life vest? Are you crazy? 1.4615 0.05105 169 107 46 16
118 It took you long enough to get here. 1.4615 0.05439 169 112 36 21
119 Save yourself Jimmy, it's too late for me. 1.4615 0.05241 169 109 42 18
120 No. We're not all in the same boat! 1.4615 0.05439 169 112 36 21
121 It's just a song, Michael. 1.4615 0.05241 169 109 42 18
122 Didn't you hear me yell "man over board"? 1.4615 0.05504 169 113 34 22
123 For the last time, I refuse to get on a boat without a life jacket! 1.4588 0.05604 170 116 30 24
124 Which way to Burning Man? 1.4588 0.05013 170 107 48 15
125 It looks like we are both using the same GPS. 1.4588 0.05218 170 110 42 18
126 Even though you say we're in the same boat, we're really not. 1.4588 0.05349 170 112 38 20
127 If you say, 'at least we have a paddle' one more time, I'm going to capsize you. 1.4583 0.05330 168 110 39 19
128 I warned you about draining the swamp. 1.4583 0.05717 168 116 27 25
129 “The third leg of this triathlon is a killer”. 1.4583 0.05263 168 109 41 18
130 Merrily my ass 1.4583 0.05397 168 111 37 20
131 Oh sure, just leave me here to drown. 1.4583 0.05527 168 113 33 22
132 Stay in your lane, buddy! 1.4583 0.05195 168 108 43 17
133 What took you so long? 1.4578 0.05099 166 105 46 15
134 I think we're in the same boat 1.4551 0.04931 167 104 50 13
135 Thanks, but I always get seasick. 1.4551 0.05284 167 109 40 18
136 We're duned. 1.4524 0.05327 168 111 38 19
137 Michael, I didn't mean this far ashore. 1.4524 0.05652 168 116 28 24
138 So, tell me again. Why did you choose the boat over the camel? 1.4518 0.05509 166 112 33 21
139 What do you mean you don't pick up hitchhikers? 1.4518 0.05442 166 111 35 20
140 I think we could both use some water 1.4512 0.05283 164 107 40 17
141 Where were you when I was in the desert island cartoon? 1.4512 0.05757 164 114 26 24
142 Face it Larry, you're up the creek without a creek. 1.4512 0.05491 164 110 34 20
143 Rough dunes today. 1.4512 0.05066 164 104 46 14
144 And where does your brilliant GPS tell us to go now? 1.4512 0.05559 164 111 32 21
145 On your mark, get set... 1.4512 0.05626 164 112 30 22
146 No thanks; I get seasick. 1.4479 0.05160 163 105 43 15
147 If you say, ' Long time no sea' one more time, I'll leave you on the first island we come to. 1.4479 0.05583 163 111 31 21
148 Thanks for the offer, but I get seasick. 1.4479 0.05305 163 107 39 17
149 You climate change deniers just don't give up, do you? 1.4479 0.05376 163 108 37 18
150 Don't just sit there, throw me a line! 1.4479 0.05233 163 106 41 16
151 No thanks, I have a tendency to get seasick. 1.4479 0.05376 163 108 37 18
152 Yes, Michael. You rowed the boat ashore. Hallelujah. 1.4479 0.05515 163 110 33 20
153 If you let me back in I promise not to criticize your navigation skills. 1.4479 0.05376 163 108 37 18
154 No thanks, I'd rather swim. 1.4479 0.05446 163 109 35 19
155 Michael, your boat is already ashore. 1.4479 0.05376 163 108 37 18
156 You have a very dry sense of humor. 1.4451 0.05208 164 107 41 16
157 You climate change deniers will never give up. 1.4451 0.05488 164 111 33 20
158 Post-truth world notwithstanding, there is no stream, you're not rowing gently, and I really take issue with "merrily"! 1.4444 0.05327 162 107 38 17
159 I'm sick and tired of always having to play the shark! 1.4444 0.05327 162 107 38 17
160 I'll never vote to drain the swamp again. 1.4444 0.05469 162 109 34 19
161 No, I Do Not have any Grey Poupon? 1.4444 0.05675 162 112 28 22
162 Practicing your heat stroke? 1.4410 0.05126 161 104 43 14
163 Welcome to death row. 1.4410 0.05421 161 108 35 18
164 Remember, when the tide comes in we switch. 1.4410 0.05275 161 106 39 16
165 Permission to come aboard? 1.4410 0.05201 161 105 41 15
166 Your choice; row verses wade 1.4410 0.05421 161 108 35 18
167 Why don't you just 'merrily' kiss my ass? 1.4410 0.05562 161 110 31 20
168 All I'm saying is that the science isn't necessarily conclusive. 1.4403 0.05397 159 106 36 17
169 So I guess that flood thing was just fake news? 1.4403 0.05471 159 107 34 18
170 Kenny, your "man overboard" thing isn't funny anymore. 1.4403 0.05397 159 106 36 17
171 I think we lost that Drum Majorette 1.4383 0.05671 162 113 27 22
172 No thanks, boats make me seasick. 1.4383 0.04792 162 101 51 10
173 Are you just gonna leave me here to drown? 1.4375 0.05297 160 106 38 16
174 Heat! Stroke! Heat! Stroke! 1.4375 0.05297 160 106 38 16
175 Hey, watch your wake I'm crawling here. 1.4367 0.05639 158 109 29 20
176 No thanks, I'll swim from here. 1.4367 0.05269 158 104 39 15
177 You took forever. Does that mean my pizza is free? 1.4367 0.05420 158 106 35 17
178 You plugged DEAD SEA into the GPS? 1.4367 0.05567 158 108 31 19
179 You're still bending your elbows early. 1.4367 0.05192 158 103 41 14
180 I don't care if you don't know how to swim; it's my turn to row. 1.4367 0.05192 158 103 41 14
181 No thanks. I have to get in my 10,000 steps. 1.4340 0.05089 159 103 43 13
182 Just going to leave me here to drown? 1.4331 0.05290 157 104 38 15
183 Do you have any Grey Poupon? 1.4331 0.05290 157 104 38 15
184 I've heard of a dry run but this is insane! 1.4331 0.05213 157 103 40 14
185 For the hundredth time, I am not getting in that thing without a life jacket. 1.4331 0.05806 157 111 24 22
186 Can you give me a lift to the next mirage? 1.4331 0.05134 157 102 42 13
187 Go on ahead. I'll catch up. 1.4331 0.05213 157 103 40 14
188 You, again? 1.4331 0.05663 157 109 28 20
189 Still think 'life is but a dream'? 1.4331 0.05290 157 104 38 15
190 Well if you think rowing in this is hard, try swimming in it! 1.4331 0.05367 157 105 36 16
191 Enough with the "cry me a river" already. 1.4304 0.05187 158 104 40 14
192 Stop splashing me!!! 1.4295 0.05154 156 102 41 13
193 They elected who?! 1.4295 0.05688 156 109 27 20
194 Let's call it a tie. 1.4295 0.05312 156 104 37 15
195 Which one of us is imagining the other? 1.4295 0.05389 156 105 35 16
196 Spoiler alert: Land, ho! 1.4295 0.05688 156 109 27 20
197 How come I always have to be the shark? 1.4295 0.05233 156 103 39 14
198 Let me say it one more time. "Man overboard!" 1.4295 0.05389 156 105 35 16
199 Hey, watch your wake! 1.4295 0.05465 156 106 33 17
200 Are you insane, man? Where's your life jacket? 1.4295 0.05073 156 101 43 12
201 You have perfected the heat stroke. 1.4286 0.05517 154 105 32 17
202 Are you the mirage or am I? 1.4286 0.05593 154 106 30 18
203 Third climate change denier I've met today. 1.4286 0.05743 154 108 26 20
204 Mine capsized. 1.4286 0.05034 154 99 44 11
205 Man, you Uber guys are everywhere! 1.4286 0.05593 154 106 30 18
206 Wow. And I thought my GPS sucked. 1.4286 0.05200 154 101 40 13
207 I thought it was metaphor for something else when he said he was going to "drain the swamp..." 1.4286 0.05361 154 103 36 15
208 I'll wait for the next mirage. 1.4286 0.05439 154 104 34 16
209 Mine capsized last week. 1.4286 0.05361 154 103 36 15
210 At least it's a dry heat. 1.4286 0.05281 154 102 38 14
211 Well, at least it's a dry heat. 1.4286 0.05281 154 102 38 14
212 This is what we get for following that majorette! 1.4277 0.05675 159 112 26 21
213 Are you any closer to accepting that the GPS might be wrong? 1.4248 0.05302 153 102 37 14
214 I'll wait for the camel. 1.4248 0.05617 153 106 29 18
215 Can we finally admit the climate has changed? 1.4248 0.05302 153 102 37 14
216 Did Moses say WHEN the sea was returning? 1.4248 0.05617 153 106 29 18
217 I'm not the mirage - you're the mirage! 1.4248 0.05138 153 100 41 12
218 "Didn't you hear me yell "man overboard" six miles ago? 1.4248 0.05302 153 102 37 14
219 I'm just not a boat person. 1.4248 0.05383 153 103 35 15
220 You're scaring the fish away! 1.4221 0.05511 154 106 31 17
221 Don't leave me! The next boat isn't due for hours. 1.4221 0.05434 154 105 33 16
222 The lake was more fun before climate change. 1.4221 0.05275 154 103 37 14
223 What the hell took so long? 1.4221 0.05434 154 105 33 16
224 Frankly, I'd rather be following that majorette from a couple weeks ago! 1.4211 0.05485 152 104 32 16
225 Quit complaining, you can't sink and I can't drown. 1.4211 0.05072 152 99 42 11
226 How far are you going? 1.4211 0.05642 152 106 28 18
227 We're ALREADY in the same boat, so stop telling me to get in! 1.4211 0.05324 152 102 36 14
228 Haven't you heard someone yelling 'man overboard' for the past four miles?!? 1.4211 0.05405 152 103 34 15
229 Hey! Quit splashing! 1.4211 0.05241 152 101 38 13
230 I said, "Man Overboard!" 1.4211 0.05564 152 105 30 17
231 It's my turn in the mirage 1.4211 0.04986 152 98 44 10
232 When I called for a ship of the desert, I was expecting a camel. 1.4211 0.05241 152 101 38 13
233 No, we are most certainly not in the same boat! 1.4211 0.05324 152 102 36 14
234 Final offer, I have two tickets to 'Hamilton'. 1.4211 0.05642 152 106 28 18
235 No! I will not just "get on board". 1.4172 0.05177 151 100 39 12
236 That’s right, just row away and leave me here to drown! 1.4172 0.05508 151 104 31 16
237 One of us is hallucinating. 1.4172 0.05262 151 101 37 13
238 Are you just going to sit there or are you going to help me find my contact lens? 1.4172 0.05345 151 102 35 14
239 I think I see land! 1.4172 0.05666 151 106 27 18
240 Yeah. The tide's out. 1.4172 0.05177 151 100 39 12
241 So what part of "MAN OVERBOARD" don't you understand? 1.4172 0.05508 151 104 31 16
242 I've come to rescue you. 1.4172 0.05345 151 102 35 14
243 Doesn't anyone pick up hitch-hikers any more? 1.4161 0.05311 149 100 36 13
244 Pardon Me, Do You Have Any Grey Poupon? 1.4161 0.05311 149 100 36 13
245 Now do you believe in climate change? 1.4161 0.05561 149 103 30 16
246 See what happens when they drain the swamp? 1.4161 0.05878 149 107 22 20
247 The next time Moses says he can part the Red Sea, just take his word for it. 1.4161 0.05479 149 102 32 15
248 It's your turn to play the shark. 1.4161 0.05561 149 103 30 16
249 For the umpteenth time...man overboard! 1.4161 0.05642 149 104 28 17
250 Have I seen land?!?! 1.4161 0.05479 149 102 32 15
251 If I admit to global warming can I get back in the boat? 1.4161 0.05311 149 100 36 13
252 I yell for help and you row right past me! 1.4161 0.05396 149 101 34 14
253 You're just going to let me drown here? 1.4150 0.05274 147 98 37 12
254 I may be thirsty, but at least I'm not delusional! 1.4133 0.05111 150 99 40 11
255 It looked different in the brochure. 1.4133 0.05022 150 98 42 10
256 Whatever floats your boat, I guess. 1.4133 0.05111 150 99 40 11
257 Believe it or not pal, we're both in the same boat.... 1.4133 0.05769 150 107 24 19
258 'Let's book off-season.' you said. 'It will be half the price and no crowds.' you said. Are you happy now? 1.4133 0.05197 150 100 38 12
259 It's a dry run. 1.4122 0.05332 148 100 35 13
260 Steve, Moses parted the sea like two weeks ago. Just admit that we're lost! 1.4122 0.05418 148 101 33 14
261 Permission to come aboard? Sir 1.4122 0.05332 148 100 35 13
262 Wait...you're not going to leave me here to drown? 1.4122 0.05667 148 104 27 17
263 Shit creek it is, but you've got a paddle. 1.4122 0.05418 148 101 33 14
264 Thank God you're here! Can you take me to one of those tiny islands with a single palm tree? 1.4122 0.05245 148 99 37 12
265 No thanks, I get sandsick. 1.4122 0.05418 148 101 33 14
266 Stop rowing, you're scaring away the fish. 1.4122 0.05585 148 103 29 16
267 Uh, Michael, you're ashore already. 1.4122 0.05502 148 102 31 15
268 Moron! Watch where you're going! 1.4122 0.05827 148 106 23 19
269 I think we're dealing with something a little worse than low tide. 1.4122 0.05502 148 102 31 15
270 It wouldn't kill you to say 'passing on the left.' 1.4122 0.05502 148 102 31 15
271 You've taken the song a bit too seriously, Michael." 1.4097 0.05435 144 98 33 13
272 On your left! 1.4094 0.05388 149 102 33 14
273 For the last time -- we're not in the same boat! 1.4094 0.05472 149 103 31 15
274 Let me guess--you must be Michael. 1.4094 0.05304 149 101 35 13
275 In order to make sure you are not a mirage I'll need to ask you a few security questions. 1.4094 0.05217 149 100 37 12
276 This " secret fishing spot " had better be worth it ! 1.4094 0.05715 149 106 25 18
277 Do you have any idea how LONG I'd been working on that sand castle? 1.4082 0.05177 147 98 38 11
278 Recalculating! 1.4082 0.05266 147 99 36 12
279 And how much for my luggage? 1.4082 0.05354 147 100 34 13
280 Don't you just hate G.P.S.? 1.4082 0.05691 147 104 26 17
281 Trust me, don't drink the sand–it will only make you thirstier. 1.4082 0.05354 147 100 34 13
282 Why don't you go rescue the people stranded on desert islands in all those other New Yorker cartoons? 1.4082 0.05525 147 102 30 15
283 Could you at least throw me a life jacket? 1.4082 0.05354 147 100 34 13
284 You can stop, Michael. 1.4082 0.05932 147 107 20 20
285 Didn't you hear he drained the swamp! 1.4082 0.05691 147 104 26 17
286 Could you please drop the 'Merrily, Merrily' bit 1.4082 0.05525 147 102 30 15
287 I refuse to get in there without a life vest. 1.4067 0.05275 150 102 35 13
288 Will you ever stop reminding me that you rowed at Harvard? 1.4067 0.05442 150 104 31 15
289 Do I LOOK like I know the way to San Jose? 1.4067 0.05683 150 107 25 18
290 Let me try the water skis again. 1.4054 0.05659 148 105 26 17
291 I'd walk a mile for a camel 1.4041 0.05196 146 98 37 11
292 Are you my Uber? 1.4041 0.05798 146 105 23 18
293 I'd get in but this kind of humor is too dry for me. 1.4041 0.05286 146 99 35 12
294 Well, he said he would drain the swamp! 1.4041 0.05548 146 102 29 15
295 Oh yeah?! Well you should try swimming in it! 1.4041 0.05011 146 96 41 9
296 Hey! I'm swimming here! 1.4041 0.05286 146 99 35 12
297 That genie screwed us again. 1.4041 0.05462 146 101 31 14
298 You just had to go back and water the plants? 1.4041 0.06037 146 108 17 21
299 Welcome to death row. 1.4041 0.05798 146 105 23 18
300 Don’t pretend you didn’t hear me yell “Man overboard!” three days ago. 1.4041 0.05632 146 103 27 16
301 I used google map, you? 1.4028 0.05515 144 100 30 14
302 I think this is the definition of "lose - lose" 1.4028 0.05689 144 102 26 16
303 Dude, you just ran over my sandcastle. 1.4028 0.05603 144 101 28 15
304 That's far enough ashore, Michael! 1.4028 0.05603 144 101 28 15
305 Must you do everything merrily? 1.4028 0.05245 144 97 36 11
306 Thanks, but I'll crawl from here. I get sea sick. 1.4028 0.05427 144 99 32 13
307 For God's sake, Michael, enough already! 1.4028 0.05773 144 103 24 17
308 No thanks! I get terribly sea sick. 1.4028 0.05427 144 99 32 13
309 He drained the wrong dang swamp! 1.4028 0.05245 144 97 36 11
310 Are you my Uber? 1.4028 0.05515 144 100 30 14
311 It wasn't complicated. I swim the Channel, you watch the compass. 1.4028 0.05515 144 100 30 14
312 Enough, Lenny -- it's your turn to be the mermaid. 1.3986 0.05448 143 99 31 13
313 You, again? 1.3986 0.05799 143 103 23 17
314 You said draining the swamp was a good idea. 1.3986 0.05357 143 98 33 12
315 It's not the heat, it's the stupidity. 1.3986 0.05538 143 100 29 14
316 Stop this nonsense about how climate change might be real. Let's just enjoy our day out on the lake. 1.3986 0.05448 143 99 31 13
317 So it's the journey that counts and not the destination, huh? 1.3955 0.05900 134 96 23 15
318 No thanks - my Uber is on the way. 1.3944 0.05378 142 98 32 12
319 Are you the mirage or am I? 1.3944 0.05470 142 99 30 13
320 I thought I called an Uber. 1.3944 0.05650 142 101 26 15
321 What are you waiting for? Throw me a life preserver. 1.3944 0.05378 142 98 32 12
322 Passing on the starboard side. 1.3944 0.05470 142 99 30 13
323 Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon? 1.3944 0.05824 142 103 22 17
324 You just had to save 10 bucks on the boat instead of the camel. 1.3944 0.05470 142 99 30 13
325 Go ahead...say merrily again! 1.3944 0.05561 142 100 28 14
326 Michael, you've rowed your boat more than ashore. 1.3944 0.05909 142 104 20 18
327 Pardon me, but would you have any Grey Poupon? 1.3944 0.05824 142 103 22 17
328 Row v. Wade appears to be a tie 1.3944 0.05650 142 101 26 15
329 Whoa buddy! This is a no wake zone. 1.3944 0.05650 142 101 26 15
330 I should have eaten you when I had the chance. 1.3944 0.05561 142 100 28 14
331 Dammit! Man Overboard! 1.3944 0.05378 142 98 32 12
332 Taking the road less traveled, are you? 1.3944 0.05470 142 99 30 13
333 I'm starting to get sandsick. 1.3944 0.05092 142 95 38 9
334 You're outta your element, pal. 1.3916 0.05255 143 98 34 11
335 I assume you're the new Secretary of Transportation! 1.3913 0.05767 138 99 24 15
336 Enough with the "Merrily, merrily." 1.3901 0.05492 141 99 29 13
337 Hey, it's a No Wake Zone. 1.3901 0.05208 141 96 35 10
338 You sprung a what? 1.3901 0.05674 141 101 25 15
339 Michael! Stop rowing! You're already ashore! 1.3901 0.05674 141 101 25 15
340 It stopped being funny 10 miles back. 1.3901 0.05492 141 99 29 13
341 Man overboard! 1.3901 0.05584 141 100 27 14
342 Now do you believe in global warming? 1.3901 0.05762 141 102 23 16
343 Any idea how you say 'un-part' in Hebrew? 1.3901 0.05850 141 103 21 17
344 You mean I could have been riding this whole time? 1.3901 0.05674 141 101 25 15
345 Hey, watch your wake! 1.3901 0.05399 141 98 31 12
346 If you let me hop in, we can use the high-occupancy lane. 1.3885 0.05356 139 96 32 11
347 Im just worried it may tip over with an extra person. 1.3885 0.05547 139 98 28 13
348 I never thought he would succeed in draining the swamp. 1.3885 0.05732 139 100 24 15
349 This is the rowed to nowhere. 1.3885 0.05547 139 98 28 13
350 Are you that Uber I called? 1.3885 0.05356 139 96 32 11
351 Damn it, Über, I ordered a camel! 1.3885 0.05547 139 98 28 13
352 This desert cruise looked so different on the website. 1.3885 0.05640 139 99 26 14
353 Your optimism is infectious. Throw me a life jacket. 1.3885 0.05547 139 98 28 13
354 The heat is making you a little dingy. 1.3885 0.05356 139 96 32 11
355 Still on the fence about climate change? 1.3885 0.05055 139 93 38 8
356 Are you a mirage...or just stupid? 1.3857 0.05698 140 101 24 15
357 Of course I need help! I just fell out of the damn boat! 1.3857 0.05420 140 98 30 12
358 I'm crawlin here! 1.3846 0.05337 143 100 31 12
359 Hey! This is a no wake zone. 1.3841 0.05376 138 96 31 11
360 When do we get to the part where life is but a dream?! 1.3841 0.05569 138 98 27 13
361 Stop with the "Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily" 1.3841 0.05376 138 96 31 11
362 Will you hurry up and throw me a rescue buoy. 1.3841 0.05756 138 100 23 15
363 Michael??? 1.3841 0.05664 138 99 25 14
364 If this is a sand bar, I'll have a dry martini. 1.3841 0.05474 138 97 29 12
365 Be careful, you're taking on sand! 1.3841 0.05664 138 99 25 14
366 No thank you - small boats make me seasick ... 1.3841 0.05376 138 96 31 11
367 I have to say, I admire your optimism. 1.3841 0.05072 138 93 37 8
368 Mind your wake ! 1.3841 0.05176 138 94 35 9
369 Thanks anyway––I'll catch THE NEXT hallucination. 1.3841 0.05376 138 96 31 11
370 Now will you admit that climate change is real? 1.3841 0.05176 138 94 35 9
371 I'm starting to rethink the whole Crossfit thing. 1.3841 0.05756 138 100 23 15
372 The next dune has the cleanest rest stop 1.3841 0.05072 138 93 37 8
373 Thanks anyway, but I already called Uber. 1.3841 0.05376 138 96 31 11
374 Still thinking it's a sandbar? 1.3841 0.05176 138 94 35 9
375 Best case scenario is that you’re taking on water. 1.3813 0.05989 139 104 17 18
376 Sing it again and I'll kill you. 1.3813 0.05441 139 98 29 12
377 You were right, it is too shallow to swim. 1.3813 0.05246 139 96 33 10
378 Wait till you see the rapids! 1.3813 0.05441 139 98 29 12
379 You have to row faster or I can't stay up on the skis 1.3813 0.05246 139 96 33 10
380 At least I'm working all the muscle groups. 1.3813 0.05146 139 95 35 9
381 For the last time, stay in your own lane! 1.3813 0.05536 139 99 27 13
382 Thank goodness you rowed by. I've been swimming out here all day. 1.3813 0.05043 139 94 37 8
383 You idiot. A camel is the ship of the desert. 1.3796 0.05397 137 96 30 11
384 Michael, you can stop rowing now. 1.3796 0.05592 137 98 26 13
385 For the last time, the water is a mirage. 1.3796 0.05296 137 95 32 10
386 Um, man overboard, idiot. 1.3796 0.05495 137 97 28 12
387 There's no merrily about it! 1.3796 0.05592 137 98 26 13
388 Pedestrians have the right of way! 1.3796 0.05296 137 95 32 10
389 Would it kill you to swim for awhile! 1.3796 0.05495 137 97 28 12
390 No, I'm looking for my contact. 1.3796 0.05296 137 95 32 10
391 Keep an eye out for sand sharks. 1.3796 0.05592 137 98 26 13
392 If you reach land, send water. 1.3796 0.05495 137 97 28 12
393 I told you we should have rented the camel but, oh no, you had to save a few dinars 1.3796 0.05781 137 100 22 15
394 Uber? 1.3796 0.05592 137 98 26 13
395 When I said 'ship of the desert' I meant a camel you idiot! 1.3796 0.05296 137 95 32 10
396 Nautical or statute miles? 1.3796 0.05296 137 95 32 10
397 Don't tell me that "We're basically in the same boat!" 1.3796 0.05296 137 95 32 10
398 That's right! Just let me drown out here. 1.3796 0.05296 137 95 32 10
399 No thanks. You know how I get sandsick. 1.3788 0.05643 132 94 26 12
400 So you've been seeing water too? 1.3778 0.05551 135 96 27 12
401 Whatever floats your boat. 1.3778 0.05137 135 92 35 8
402 Michael, we're ashore already! 1.3778 0.05243 135 93 33 9
403 Well, at least we'll come in ahead of that girl on the pogo stick! 1.3778 0.05936 135 100 19 16
404 Man Overboard, - Really? 1.3778 0.05243 135 93 33 9
405 Michael, you've rowed your boat ashore. 1.3778 0.05746 135 98 23 14
406 Do you believe in global warming now? 1.3778 0.05348 135 94 31 10
407 I thought camels were the ships of the desert! 1.3778 0.05450 135 95 29 11
408 Man overboard! 1.3778 0.05649 135 97 25 13
409 If you let me back in, I won't talk about Climate Change. 1.3778 0.05551 135 96 27 12
410 But I can't swim 1.3778 0.05551 135 96 27 12
411 Let me in the boat. I'm tired of swimming. 1.3778 0.05746 135 98 23 14
412 Good heavens man! Please tell me you're not my Uber driver! 1.3778 0.05936 135 100 19 16
413 Michael, you can stop rowing now. 1.3750 0.05517 136 97 27 12
414 What do you mean you're afraid if I try to get in I'll tip the boat over? 1.3750 0.05898 136 101 19 16
415 I hate low tide. 1.3750 0.04999 136 92 37 7
416 Whaddya mean 'I think I can see land.'? 1.3731 0.05672 134 97 24 13
417 Pass on the right, dammit 1.3731 0.05770 134 98 22 14
418 It's my damn mirage and I tell you you're supposed to be a mermaid ! 1.3731 0.05573 134 96 26 12
419 You're the 3rd climate change denier I've met today. 1.3731 0.05770 134 98 22 14
420 Slow down, damnit! 1.3731 0.05672 134 97 24 13
421 We are not in the same boat! 1.3731 0.05573 134 96 26 12
422 Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon? 1.3731 0.05367 134 94 30 10
423 Yeah! Well, I can walk on water. 1.3731 0.05471 134 95 28 11
424 I'm still doing my pushups, I'll switch over to the rowing machine later. 1.3731 0.05262 134 93 32 9
425 I'm telling you this is not a low tide problem. 1.3731 0.05471 134 95 28 11
426 Does it look like I have any extra sunscreen? 1.3731 0.05867 134 99 20 15
427 Prepare to be boarded! 1.3731 0.05044 134 91 36 7
428 Do you have any Grey Poupon? 1.3731 0.05471 134 95 28 11
429 You just had to save a few bucks on the GPS. 1.3731 0.05367 134 94 30 10
430 Enough of the crawl. I'm switching to the butterfly! 1.3731 0.05367 134 94 30 10
431 Now that you've rowed the damn boat ashore, what now Michael? 1.3704 0.05637 135 98 24 13
432 No thanks, I get sandsick. 1.3692 0.05583 130 93 26 11
433 Hey! Watch the wake! 1.3684 0.05387 133 94 29 10
434 At least it's not raining. 1.3684 0.05492 133 95 27 11
435 Once we make it to the ocean, we'll switch 1.3684 0.05171 133 92 33 8
436 I didn't say "go" yet! 1.3684 0.05387 133 94 29 10
437 Great, even my mirage needs water. 1.3684 0.05795 133 98 21 14
438 " Help me. Please, help me! I can't swim". 1.3684 0.05594 133 96 25 12
439 You had ONE job 1.3684 0.05594 133 96 25 12
440 They called this "California." 1.3684 0.05492 133 95 27 11
441 How do I know it won't sink? 1.3684 0.05060 133 91 35 7
442 I don't think your crew is the only thing that's abandoned you. 1.3684 0.05280 133 93 31 9
443 Enough with the "merrily, merrily, merrily". Life is NOT a dream. 1.3684 0.05695 133 97 23 13
444 Do I look like I know where the water is? 1.3684 0.05594 133 96 25 12
445 It's not the heat, it's the humility. 1.3684 0.05492 133 95 27 11
446 Are you going to just let me drown? 1.3684 0.05280 133 93 31 9
447 Come on and cry me a river. 1.3684 0.05594 133 96 25 12
448 Heat stroke is a noun, not a verb, moron. 1.3684 0.05695 133 97 23 13
449 At what point can we just walk?! 1.3684 0.05795 133 98 21 14
450 Now do you believe in global warming? 1.3684 0.05988 133 100 17 16
451 It's your turn to swim. 1.3684 0.05171 133 92 33 8
452 You're going to leave me here to not drown? 1.3684 0.05280 133 93 31 9
453 Let me guess...another climate change denier. 1.3664 0.05441 131 93 28 10
454 I am sorry! If you let me back on the boat, I will not say another word about your sense of direction. 1.3664 0.05653 131 95 24 12
455 And what exactly is Uber Surge Pricing? 1.3664 0.05755 131 96 22 13
456 That's quite a dry sense of humor you've got there. 1.3664 0.05548 131 94 26 11
457 NOW do you think life is but a dream? 1.3664 0.05755 131 96 22 13
458 You did promise we'd take turns. 1.3664 0.05441 131 93 28 10
459 Man overboard, damn you! 1.3664 0.05548 131 94 26 11
460 Uber, I presume? 1.3664 0.05653 131 95 24 12
461 "What about 'Land Ho!' don't you understand!!? 1.3664 0.05441 131 93 28 10
462 Do you think you could stop splashing me? 1.3664 0.05755 131 96 22 13
463 can you share some of your imaginary water 1.3664 0.05548 131 94 26 11
464 Stop complaining! At least sharks are no longer a threat. 1.3664 0.05220 131 91 32 8
465 Michael, you've rowed the damned boat waaaay too far ashore. 1.3664 0.05653 131 95 24 12
466 On the bright side, we're in no danger of drowning. 1.3664 0.05107 131 90 34 7
467 Will you be needing a coxswain? 1.3664 0.05107 131 90 34 7
468 At least we're not stuck behind an imaginary majorette. 1.3664 0.05857 131 97 20 14
469 Okay, you win. Life is a beach. 1.3664 0.05755 131 96 22 13
470 Oh, stop complaining. At least you get to work on your core. 1.3664 0.04871 131 88 38 5
471 Oh no thank you. I suffer from seasickness. 1.3664 0.05857 131 97 20 14
472 I told you this was going to be a hard road to row. 1.3664 0.05220 131 91 32 8
473 One more "Row, row, row your boat" and you're dead! 1.3664 0.05441 131 93 28 10
474 I'll do it once more but then I'm done making motorboat sounds. 1.3664 0.05548 131 94 26 11
475 Hey, buddy! Stay in your lane. 1.3664 0.04990 131 89 36 6
476 You're splashing sand in my face. 1.3664 0.05548 131 94 26 11
477 Uber? 1.3664 0.05548 131 94 26 11
478 I know you're not real, but could I have a ride anyway? 1.3664 0.05755 131 96 22 13
479 Are you crazy? Not without a life vest. 1.3664 0.05332 131 92 30 9
480 I think I'd rather be up a creek without a paddle. 1.3664 0.05548 131 94 26 11
481 I hope you sink. 1.3664 0.05653 131 95 24 12
482 Trust me, I didn't say "get your ship together." 1.3664 0.05755 131 96 22 13
483 Do you have to splash me? 1.3664 0.05548 131 94 26 11
484 Let's call it a tie. 1.3664 0.05332 131 92 30 9
485 How about an "On your left."? 1.3664 0.06150 131 100 14 17
486 Okay! Fine! Star Wars is better than Star Trek...now can I get back in? 1.3664 0.05755 131 96 22 13
487 Would ya quit with the merrily, merrily. This is not a dream. 1.3664 0.05653 131 95 24 12
488 What I wouldn't give to be up a creek without a paddle! 1.3664 0.05548 131 94 26 11
489 Man, looks like you need water more than I do. 1.3664 0.05441 131 93 28 10
490 Your technique is not the issue. 1.3657 0.05248 134 94 31 9
491 No, I Do Not have any Grey Poupon? 1.3636 0.05917 132 99 18 15
492 Don't splash! 1.3636 0.05512 132 95 26 11
493 For the love of god, I can't swim 1.3615 0.05881 130 97 19 14
494 Okay, so what if I say you were right about climate change? 1.3615 0.05350 130 92 29 9
495 Well Michael, you rowed the boat ashore alright! 1.3615 0.05881 130 97 19 14
496 I promise I won't get seasick. 1.3615 0.05005 130 89 35 6
497 Your mirage is obviously grander than mine. 1.3615 0.05238 130 91 31 8
498 Okay Michael, we're ashore now. Hallelujah. 1.3615 0.05675 130 95 23 12
499 Are you just going to leave me here to drown!? 1.3615 0.05350 130 92 29 9
500 Thanks for offering to let me in, but I get seasick. 1.3615 0.05675 130 95 23 12
501 Did it ever occur to you to throw me a life line? 1.3615 0.05123 130 90 33 7
502 I know you're in a hurry, but could you help me look for my contact lens? 1.3615 0.05461 130 93 27 10
503 Why do I always have to swim? 1.3615 0.05569 130 94 25 11
504 Let me back in the boat Irv, you know I'm terrified of sand sharks. 1.3615 0.05461 130 93 27 10
505 Ready... Set... Go ! 1.3615 0.05675 130 95 23 12
506 I get it Michael, you've rowed the boat ashore. 1.3615 0.05982 130 98 17 15
507 I admire your optimism, but positive thinking will only take you so far. 1.3615 0.05461 130 93 27 10
508 Don't expect a good Uber rating. 1.3615 0.05675 130 95 23 12
509 Come on in, the sand's fine. 1.3615 0.05461 130 93 27 10
510 I see you're still denying climate change. 1.3615 0.05238 130 91 31 8
511 I think I'm ready for the Dubai Olympics. 1.3615 0.05779 130 96 21 13
512 How many bars do you have? My GPS still says "rerouting." 1.3615 0.05123 130 90 33 7
513 No thanks. I'll wait for the mirage with the land rover. 1.3615 0.05569 130 94 25 11
514 It's my turn to hallucinate. 1.3615 0.05123 130 90 33 7
515 You're delusional if you think I can swim. 1.3615 0.06081 130 99 15 16
516 Give it up, the tide has changed. 1.3615 0.05461 130 93 27 10
517 Now are you convinced climate change is real? 1.3615 0.05569 130 94 25 11
518 Are you just going to let me drown?! 1.3615 0.05123 130 90 33 7
519 You sir, do not have both oars in the water. 1.3615 0.05238 130 91 31 8
520 What happened to my regular Uber driver? 1.3615 0.05779 130 96 21 13
521 And they called me a climate change denier. 1.3615 0.05569 130 94 25 11
522 Yes, unfortunately, we are still in the same boat. 1.3615 0.05461 130 93 27 10
523 Hey! Watch where you're going! 1.3615 0.05569 130 94 25 11
524 No thanks, I'll just keep on swimming. 1.3615 0.05569 130 94 25 11
525 Why am I doing all the swimming? 1.3615 0.05461 130 93 27 10
526 For god's sake..throw me a line. 1.3615 0.05238 130 91 31 8
527 Don't just sit there, throw me a line! 1.3588 0.05638 131 96 23 12
528 Please, I can't swim! 1.3588 0.05741 131 97 21 13
529 Stop splashing me, will ya! 1.3588 0.05638 131 96 23 12
530 You couldn't have used your third wish for a Range Rover?! 1.3588 0.05638 131 96 23 12
531 No thanks. I get seasick just looking at boats. 1.3588 0.04974 131 90 35 6
532 One of us is lost. 1.3588 0.05533 131 95 25 11
533 It's my mirage. I should at least get to row. 1.3588 0.05091 131 91 33 7
534 When's it my turn to row? I'm tired of swimming. 1.3588 0.05426 131 94 27 10
535 Are you here to rescue me? 1.3566 0.05803 129 96 20 13
536 I'm looking for water. You? 1.3566 0.05697 129 95 22 12
537 Stop telling me you can't swim! 1.3566 0.05481 129 93 26 10
538 Help, I'm metaphorically drowning! 1.3566 0.05590 129 94 24 11
539 Face it Jake, you're washed up. 1.3566 0.05481 129 93 26 10
540 BOTH contacts? 1.3566 0.05697 129 95 22 12
541 When exactly did the tide go out? 1.3566 0.05019 129 89 34 6
542 If you think the rowing segment is hard, wait until you try to get out of the gym contract. 1.3566 0.05481 129 93 26 10
543 Visualize your goal? Really, that's the best you got? 1.3566 0.05369 129 92 28 9
544 Will you please stop shouting Land Ahoy? 1.3566 0.05481 129 93 26 10
545 They never should've drained the swamp. 1.3566 0.05590 129 94 24 11
546 We landed three miles ago, idiot 1.3566 0.06008 129 98 16 15
547 Stop telling me that it is closer in nautical miles. 1.3566 0.05019 129 89 34 6
548 No thanks, I prefer to swim. 1.3566 0.05369 129 92 28 9
549 It's my turn to row now. 1.3561 0.05283 132 94 29 9
550 So denial isn't just a river in Egypt. 1.3538 0.05764 130 97 20 13
551 OK, the bottom is sanded so now we have to paint it. 1.3538 0.05445 130 94 26 10
552 Stop singing that song, Michael. 1.3538 0.05660 130 96 22 12
553 I feel like I'm in a New Yorker cartoon. 1.3538 0.05660 130 96 22 12
554 How many more of these desert cartoons do we have to endure? 1.3516 0.05611 128 94 23 11
555 I thought you said the swamp wouldn't be drained until February!!! 1.3516 0.05720 128 95 21 12
556 I've tried the breast stroke, back stroke, and crawl stroke. Now I'm ready for the heat stroke. 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
557 Thanks, but I'm afraid we'd capsize. 1.3516 0.05154 128 90 31 7
558 Drain the swamp?" You said "DRAIN THE SWAMP???!!! 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
559 Hold on there sailor. This is a no-wake zone. 1.3516 0.05154 128 90 31 7
560 Deserting me? 1.3516 0.05500 128 93 25 10
561 And bring back a pizza, 6 cheeseburgers, a sack of tortilla chips, ice cream and a Chapstick. 1.3516 0.05611 128 94 23 11
562 What happened to the majorette? 1.3516 0.05500 128 93 25 10
563 Yeah, well at least I'm keeping it real. 1.3516 0.05720 128 95 21 12
564 No, for the thousandth time, I do not want to be the first mate. 1.3516 0.05720 128 95 21 12
565 I believe I have the right of way in this situation. 1.3516 0.05272 128 91 29 8
566 When they said get a ship of the desert they meant a camel! 1.3516 0.05154 128 90 31 7
567 Noah, how clearly did you hear that voice? 1.3516 0.05931 128 97 17 14
568 I Still Think Bernie Can Win. 1.3516 0.06034 128 98 15 15
569 For the thousandth time – you come in on 'Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily.' 1.3516 0.05387 128 92 27 9
570 Are you sure we only hit a sandbar? 1.3511 0.05518 131 96 24 11
571 Hey, you're taking on sand! 1.3511 0.05518 131 96 24 11
572 Yell "Land Ho!" one more time and I'll clobber you. 1.3511 0.05518 131 96 24 11
573 'Sand Ho! 1.3511 0.05828 131 99 18 14
574 God isn't going to flood the place until you can fit WAY more animals. 1.3511 0.05301 131 94 28 9
575 Pal, you're lost in more ways than one. 1.3511 0.05189 131 93 30 8
576 Why can't you just admit you made a wrong turn? 1.3511 0.05301 131 94 28 9
577 You can have your rowing machine, I'll stick to push ups. 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
578 Michael! You've long since rowed the boat ashore! 1.3492 0.05890 126 95 18 13
579 What do you mean it beats crawling ? 1.3492 0.05441 126 91 26 9
580 The good news is we have the paddles; the bad news is no creek. 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
581 For God's sake, throw me a life jacket! 1.3492 0.05441 126 91 26 9
582 Let me guess--your're from the government and here to help me. 1.3492 0.05670 126 93 22 11
583 Do you believe in global warming now? 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
584 Sing one more note and I'm going to merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily punch you in the face. 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
585 You call it optimism. I call it denial. 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
586 Yeah, yeah---for the millionth time--your biceps are looking bigger. 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
587 You know I don't know how to swim! 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
588 What, you're gonna let me drown out here? 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
589 Really? "Life is but a dream?" 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
590 Michael??? 1.3492 0.05890 126 95 18 13
591 It seemed easier before they drained the swamp. 1.3492 0.05890 126 95 18 13
592 I don't mean to make waves but...they would be nice! 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
593 I think you might be even more lost than I am. 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
594 Please, I can't swim! 1.3492 0.05670 126 93 22 11
595 We're pretty far up this creek, but at least you have two paddles! 1.3492 0.05203 126 89 30 7
596 Let me guess... you're one of those 'glass is half full' kinda guys? 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
597 Look, I don't mind all the rowing, but that "gently down the stream" crap has got to stop. 1.3492 0.05781 126 94 20 12
598 The least you could do is throw me a life vest! 1.3492 0.05441 126 91 26 9
599 Frankly, I'm surprised Uber works all the way out here. 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
600 Wow, that global warming thing just kinda sneaks up on ya, doesn't it? 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
601 Metaphorically, we're in the same boat! Will you quit correcting me? 1.3492 0.05441 126 91 26 9
602 Is this my mirage or yours? 1.3492 0.05997 126 96 16 14
603 Now, it's your turn to be Moby. 1.3492 0.05781 126 94 20 12
604 One of us is delirious. 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
605 I tell you having a coxswain would make all the difference. 1.3492 0.05670 126 93 22 11
606 Permission to come aboard? Sir 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
607 You're taking denial to a new level. 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
608 How come it's always your turn going downhill? 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
609 Yes, I did call for an Uber. What took so long? 1.3492 0.05781 126 94 20 12
610 Watch your wake, Pal! 1.3492 0.05203 126 89 30 7
611 This is the first time ever I gave an Uber driver one star. 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
612 I have an idea--Why don't we both just walk? 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
613 Stop making waves! 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
614 Do you still deny that climate change is real? 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
615 Keep rowing! It's just past the lighthouse. You can't miss it. 1.3492 0.05890 126 95 18 13
616 have you seen two guys crawling behing a batoon twirler? 1.3492 0.06102 126 97 14 15
617 All this way and you forgot the fishing rods?? 1.3492 0.05670 126 93 22 11
618 Michael you've done it, hallelujah! 1.3492 0.05781 126 94 20 12
619 Are you going to just let me drown? 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
620 One of us is delirious. 1.3492 0.05441 126 91 26 9
621 What do you mean you're not my Uber? 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
622 Return the GPS. 1.3492 0.05557 126 92 24 10
623 Michael, STOP rowing your boat ashore! 1.3492 0.05890 126 95 18 13
624 Do you believe in climate science now? 1.3492 0.05781 126 94 20 12
625 Do you still think life is but a dream? 1.3492 0.05441 126 91 26 9
626 If life is but a dream, why can't we merrily get the hell out of here? 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
627 I would help you row. but I get seasick. 1.3492 0.05997 126 96 16 14
628 What's your big hurry? 1.3492 0.05323 126 90 28 8
629 For the last time, the "ship of the desert" is a CAMEL! THAT'S what I thought you were bringing! 1.3492 0.05781 126 94 20 12
630 Do I have any Gray Poupon? That's hilarious, Frank... 1.3488 0.05238 129 92 29 8
631 What happened to the majorette? 1.3488 0.05993 129 99 15 15
632 No, I don't want to take a turn rowing! 1.3488 0.05682 129 96 21 12
633 When did you say the tide was coming in? 1.3465 0.05169 127 90 30 7
634 Excuse me, do you have any Grey Poupon? 1.3465 0.05405 127 92 26 9
635 For the millionth time: I get seasick! 1.3465 0.05405 127 92 26 9
636 Pull! You're almost to the other end of the mirage! 1.3465 0.05047 127 89 32 6
637 The heat is making you a little dingy. 1.3465 0.05520 127 93 24 10
638 I knew Uber would get here 1.3465 0.05632 127 94 22 11
639 You climate change sceptics drive me crazy. 1.3465 0.05520 127 93 24 10
640 Don't make waves. 1.3465 0.05289 127 91 28 8
641 Has 'Man Overboard!' lost all meaning to you? 1.3465 0.05405 127 92 26 9
642 Slow down, I can't swim that fast! 1.3465 0.05405 127 92 26 9
643 OK - I think it's your turn to play the shark. 1.3465 0.05289 127 91 28 8
644 One more chorus of "row, row, row your boat," and you're a dead man. 1.3465 0.05520 127 93 24 10
645 Race you to the mirage? 1.3465 0.05632 127 94 22 11
646 Are you in my mirage, or am I in yours? 1.3465 0.04921 127 88 34 5
647 I get that Michael rowed his boat ashore, but your name's Barry. 1.3465 0.05850 127 96 18 13
648 I refuse to sing the word merrily one more time. 1.3465 0.05742 127 95 20 12
649 Michael, you can stop rowing, your boat's ashore! 1.3465 0.05289 127 91 28 8
650 Are you talking to me? 1.3465 0.05289 127 91 28 8
651 If you are such a good mirage, throw me a rope. 1.3465 0.05405 127 92 26 9
652 What do you mean, the sun's making ME crazy? You're the one who didn't bring life jackets. 1.3440 0.05691 125 93 21 11
653 A 'passing on your left' would have been nice. 1.3440 0.05577 125 92 23 10
654 Are you my mirage or am I yours? 1.3440 0.05093 125 88 31 6
655 Well, aren't you one big mixed metaphor. 1.3440 0.05577 125 92 23 10
656 I know I prayed for a ship of the desert, but I meant a camel. 1.3440 0.05341 125 90 27 8
657 Are you having the mirage or am I? 1.3440 0.05093 125 88 31 6
658 (in reference to winning caption, Jan 2) Have you seen two guys following a majorette? 1.3440 0.05914 125 95 17 13
659 Watch your wake, buddy! 1.3440 0.05341 125 90 27 8
660 Michael, I told you to stop once you rowed the boat ashore! 1.3440 0.05577 125 92 23 10
661 Of course it's slow going. You're rowing against the current. 1.3440 0.05093 125 88 31 6
662 Not so merrily, now, are we? 1.3440 0.05460 125 91 25 9
663 Need a coxswain? 1.3440 0.05093 125 88 31 6
664 Thanks anyway, but I'll wait for the camel. 1.3440 0.05460 125 91 25 9
665 I suppose you're looking for water too. 1.3440 0.05341 125 90 27 8
666 No, I don't think we're almost there. 1.3440 0.05460 125 91 25 9
667 Are you still denying global warming? 1.3440 0.05218 125 89 29 7
668 If it was you who dropped the contact lens, I'd be down here helping you look! 1.3440 0.05691 125 93 21 11
669 Local or express? 1.3440 0.05691 125 93 21 11
670 Whaddaya mean life is but a dream? 1.3440 0.05093 125 88 31 6
671 Come on in, the sand's fine. 1.3387 0.05233 124 89 28 7
672 One of us is wrong 1.3387 0.05597 124 92 22 10
673 Michael, enough already! You’ve been ashore for hours. 1.3387 0.05233 124 89 28 7
674 Don't give up the ship? Really? 1.3387 0.05357 124 90 26 8
675 Watch it there, Buddy! I'm looking for a contact lens here! 1.3387 0.04564 124 84 38 2
676 Why do you always get to row? 1.3387 0.04977 124 87 32 5
677 Cut it out, Jerry! Would you help me find my contact? 1.3387 0.05478 124 91 24 9
678 Why don't you crawl for a while, and I'll row. 1.3387 0.05597 124 92 22 10
679 I think we've both gone overboard. 1.3387 0.05826 124 94 18 12
680 If you don't stop whistling "Raindrops Keep Fallin' on My Head", I'll kill you. 1.3387 0.05826 124 94 18 12
681 Watch the wake, buddy! 1.3387 0.05713 124 93 20 11
682 Michael, you did it! 1.3387 0.05938 124 95 16 13
683 Have you any Grey Poupon? 1.3387 0.05713 124 93 20 11
684 I just need a lift to my next mirage. 1.3387 0.05233 124 89 28 7
685 Are you sure the instructions were "One is by sea, two is by sand"? 1.3387 0.05597 124 92 22 10
686 Which one of us is hallucinating? 1.3387 0.05597 124 92 22 10
687 So what? I can't swim either! 1.3387 0.05107 124 88 30 6
688 What? No life jacket? 1.3361 0.05021 122 86 31 5
689 Yes, I think it is safe to say our marine GPS system has malfunctioned. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
690 Race you to the next dune! 1.3361 0.05891 122 93 17 12
691 Still a climate change denier? 1.3361 0.06226 122 96 11 15
692 Help me. I can't swim. 1.3361 0.05891 122 93 17 12
693 I'm guessing you don't have any water? 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
694 We're in big trouble if I can't find my contact. 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
695 You and your 'short-cut'! 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
696 YOUR arms are tired?!Try doing the breast stroke for 900 miles! 1.3361 0.05774 122 92 19 11
697 Do I have some water for your Dramamine? Seriously? 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
698 You still think the science on global warming is 'unsettled'? 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
699 You promised I could row today. 1.3361 0.05774 122 92 19 11
700 Thats the last time I let you set the GPS. 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
701 Whaddaya think? Of course I'm the one who called for an Uber. 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
702 Sure, a ride would be great. You got a spare life jacket in there? 1.3361 0.05021 122 86 31 5
703 Are you seriously going to make me swim the entire way!? 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
704 OK I made a mistake, now can I get back in the boat? 1.3361 0.05284 122 88 27 7
705 Stop splashing me!!! 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
706 I'm already hallucinating, so stop making waves. 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
707 Have you seen the great white camel? 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
708 I'm resigning as your personal trainer. 1.3361 0.05021 122 86 31 5
709 Hey! Quit splashing! 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
710 I said I'm sorry. Let me back in. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
711 Two if by sea you idiot! 1.3361 0.06004 122 94 15 13
712 No, I DON'T think we should stop and ask for directions. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
713 Nah, I prefer to swim. 1.3361 0.04885 122 85 33 4
714 Worst fishing trip ever, Paul. 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
715 You're gonna wish your life was but a dream. 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
716 I tell you, one of us is getting their mirages mixed up. 1.3361 0.05774 122 92 19 11
717 "Merrily, Merrily." Really? Really? 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
718 I'm swimming here! 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
719 It's just a guess, but I don't think that waiting for high tide is really going to help 1.3361 0.04885 122 85 33 4
720 No no no! YOU start singing on the ROW! 1.3361 0.04885 122 85 33 4
721 Michael, for God's sake, please stop rowing ashore! 1.3361 0.05774 122 92 19 11
722 Get a grip, Frank. It was just a mirage. 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
723 Denial ain't just a river in Egypt. 1.3361 0.05656 122 91 21 10
724 Frankly, you need water more than I do. 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
725 Rising sea levels are not our main problem here 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
726 Look, our story just doesn't hold water. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
727 Still a climate denier? 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
728 My boat sank two days ago. 1.3361 0.05155 122 87 29 6
729 No wake zone! NO WAKE ZONE!!" 1.3361 0.05411 122 89 25 8
730 I think I'll wait for an Uber. 1.3361 0.05535 122 90 23 9
731 I don’t like making waves. 1.3361 0.05891 122 93 17 12
732 I'm warning you - go ahead say life's a beach just one more time 1.3361 0.05284 122 88 27 7
733 How should I know which one of us is a hallucination? 1.3360 0.05441 125 92 24 9
734 Enough with the dry runs, Howard! 1.3360 0.05321 125 91 26 8
735 Well Barry, when it's your turn to swim you can make all the dolphin noises you want. 1.3360 0.05786 125 95 18 12
736 There hasn't been an ocean here since 2020. 1.3333 0.05496 123 91 23 9
737 I'll believe in climate change when hell freezes over! 1.3333 0.05962 123 95 15 13
738 It gets harder at low tide. 1.3333 0.05248 123 89 27 7
739 Michael, you HAVE rowed the boat ashore; Hallelujah, already. 1.3333 0.05616 123 92 21 10
740 No, thank you. I like the water. 1.3306 0.05808 124 95 17 12
741 Ok , ok, if I promise to stop quoting Nietzsche can I get back in the boat? 1.3306 0.05033 121 86 30 5
742 It's a metaphor. 1.3306 0.05428 121 89 24 8
743 I was crawling before you learned to row. 1.3306 0.05299 121 88 26 7
744 Hit me with that fuckin' oar again and I'll fuckin' drown you. 1.3306 0.06029 121 94 14 13
745 Help me. I can't swim. 1.3306 0.05033 121 86 30 5
746 No, I don't have any suntan lotion. Do you have any water? 1.3306 0.05168 121 87 28 6
747 At least you get to sit down. 1.3306 0.05033 121 86 30 5
748 Sure, take the easy way out. 1.3306 0.05168 121 87 28 6
749 It's a hard road to row. 1.3306 0.05428 121 89 24 8
750 Help, ..., man overboard! 1.3306 0.05428 121 89 24 8
751 Looks like he drained more than the swamp. 1.3306 0.05553 121 90 22 9
752 Michael, enough ! 1.3306 0.05796 121 92 18 11
753 What time is the next one? 1.3306 0.05299 121 88 26 7
754 What do you mean your GPS is recalculating!! 1.3306 0.05299 121 88 26 7
755 Yes, Michael, you've rowed the boat ashore. 1.3306 0.05299 121 88 26 7
756 Now do you believe in global warming, Bob? 1.3306 0.05299 121 88 26 7
757 They said global warming would take longer than this. 1.3306 0.05299 121 88 26 7
758 Michael your boat "IS" ashore ! 1.3306 0.05676 121 91 20 10
759 I'll never book a discount cruise again 1.3306 0.06029 121 94 14 13
760 Get your boat out of my mirage. 1.3306 0.05676 121 91 20 10
761 Hey! I'm swimming here! 1.3306 0.05299 121 88 26 7
762 Well, of course it's easy for you—you don't get seasick. 1.3306 0.05553 121 90 22 9
763 Hey buddy, next time warn people before passing! 1.3306 0.05299 121 88 26 7
764 This is the last time we use Siri for directions. 1.3306 0.05553 121 90 22 9
765 Who drained the swamp? 1.3306 0.05428 121 89 24 8
766 And you doubted global warming. 1.3306 0.05676 121 91 20 10
767 You can stop now, Michael. 1.3306 0.05796 121 92 18 11
768 I'll get back in the boat when you stop yelling 'Land ho!' 1.3306 0.05428 121 89 24 8
769 "You think I'm the mirage? 1.3306 0.05796 121 92 18 11
770 Hey! Watch it, pal! I'm crawling here! 1.3306 0.05428 121 89 24 8
771 Turn back. You're in the wrong cartoon! 1.3306 0.05676 121 91 20 10
772 Pardon me....but do you have any gray poupon? 1.3306 0.05676 121 91 20 10
773 NOW, can we call an Uber? 1.3306 0.05553 121 90 22 9
774 No, I will NOT join you for a round of "Row, Row, Row Your Boat." 1.3306 0.05428 121 89 24 8
775 A little less merrily! 1.3250 0.05696 120 91 19 10
776 Hey, that's my boat. 1.3250 0.05314 120 88 25 7
777 Any sight of land? 1.3250 0.05571 120 90 21 9
778 Stop screaming, "Land ho!" 1.3250 0.05444 120 89 23 8
779 See, it is you who was high, not the tide. 1.3250 0.05571 120 90 21 9
780 Which one of us is the hallucination of the other? 1.3250 0.05571 120 90 21 9
781 Maybe you're stuck on a sand bar ? 1.3250 0.05571 120 90 21 9
782 Pardon Me, Do You Have Any Grey Poupon? 1.3250 0.06053 120 94 13 13
783 Are you kidding me ... women and children first? 1.3250 0.05044 120 86 29 5
784 How many times do I have to say "Land Ho" before you stop rowing!? 1.3250 0.05181 120 87 27 6
785 But I had to be Wilson yesterday! 1.3250 0.05444 120 89 23 8
786 If you hit me with the oar one more time, I'm getting back in the boat. 1.3250 0.05571 120 90 21 9
787 You're in my lane. 1.3250 0.05314 120 88 25 7
788 Request permission to come aboard, Captain. 1.3250 0.05696 120 91 19 10
789 No thanks. I just called a cab. 1.3250 0.04903 120 85 31 4
790 Stop singing that damn song! 1.3250 0.05314 120 88 25 7
791 No, the tide is not going to come in any minute. 1.3250 0.05571 120 90 21 9
792 When is it my turn with the mirage? 1.3250 0.05444 120 89 23 8
793 For pete's sake, the boat will NOT tip over if you let me climb in! 1.3250 0.05571 120 90 21 9
794 Some triathlon! Next you'll have to bicycle across a lake. 1.3250 0.05314 120 88 25 7
795 Do you still think life is but a dream? 1.3250 0.05314 120 88 25 7
796 Your other boat has a motor? 1.3250 0.05314 120 88 25 7
797 The brochure said "isolated beach." 1.3220 0.05500 118 88 22 8
798 Saved!! I came so close to giving up. 1.3220 0.05500 118 88 22 8
799 "Great flood," my ass. 1.3220 0.05757 118 90 18 10
800 Everyone else calls you a mirage; I say you're an idiot. 1.3220 0.05757 118 90 18 10
801 #DrainTheSwamp 1.3220 0.05757 118 90 18 10
802 You threw me out to lighten the boat? 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
803 No thanks, I'd rather swim. 1.3220 0.05500 118 88 22 8
804 I'm guessing another 3 hours to high tide. 1.3220 0.04945 118 84 30 4
805 Can't a man get a halfway-decent mirage? 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
806 but you know I can't swim' 1.3220 0.05090 118 85 28 5
807 Showoff! 1.3220 0.05500 118 88 22 8
808 The scientists never mentioned global evaporation. 1.3220 0.05230 118 86 26 6
809 Hey, you got sand on me. 1.3220 0.05630 118 89 20 9
810 You're going the wrong way! 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
811 I will not get back in the boat until you admit it's a mirage! 1.3220 0.05630 118 89 20 9
812 So this is what "draining the swamp" is like. 1.3220 0.05090 118 85 28 5
813 On your way to the mirage? 1.3220 0.05230 118 86 26 6
814 You need to update that GPS 1.3220 0.05500 118 88 22 8
815 You can stop rowing now, Michael. 1.3220 0.06123 118 93 12 13
816 WAIT! Will you also pick up some milk? 1.3220 0.05500 118 88 22 8
817 This is a no wake zone! 1.3220 0.05230 118 86 26 6
818 I take it you're the camel designed by the committee. 1.3220 0.05500 118 88 22 8
819 By chance, have you seen a lost shaker of salt? 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
820 You call that rowing! I could swim faster! 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
821 Enough with the 'Land Ho's! 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
822 I think we can safely say we've beached by now! 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
823 Enough with the merrily, already. 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
824 Denial only gets you so far. 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
825 Trump drained the swamp all right! 1.3220 0.05630 118 89 20 9
826 Hey, mind your wake! 1.3220 0.04945 118 84 30 4
827 What took you so long? I left that message in a bottle weeks ago! 1.3220 0.05630 118 89 20 9
828 "There's a marina at the next mirage". 1.3220 0.05882 118 91 16 11
829 Michael, you rowed the boat ashore! 1.3220 0.05630 118 89 20 9
830 Excuse me, sir, do you have any Grey Poupon? 1.3220 0.05500 118 88 22 8
831 It's 'gently down the stream' you imbicile. 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
832 My hope of rescue has also evaporated. 1.3220 0.05367 118 87 24 7
833 Excuse me, but I have the right-of-way 1.3193 0.05193 119 87 26 6
834 Can you at least stop singing that stupid song? 1.3193 0.05715 119 91 18 10
835 Why couldn't you hallucinate a helicopter? 1.3193 0.05193 119 87 26 6
836 Are you going anywhere near Secaucus? 1.3193 0.05328 119 88 24 7
837 What do you mean? - "I'll be back later". 1.3193 0.05328 119 88 24 7
838 WHAT?! The mermaid's a MIRAGE?! 1.3193 0.05715 119 91 18 10
839 Can we PLEASE ask for directions? 1.3193 0.05959 119 93 14 12
840 You here for the timeshare presentation, too? 1.3193 0.05589 119 90 20 9
841 George, I'm telling you it IS land! 1.3193 0.05589 119 90 20 9
842 That "merrily, merrily, merrily" line could be revised. 1.3193 0.05328 119 88 24 7
843 It's your turn to swim. 1.3193 0.05054 119 86 28 5
844 The STREAM, you idiot. Down the STREAM. 1.3193 0.05589 119 90 20 9
845 According to Waze, this is the fastest route. 1.3193 0.05959 119 93 14 12
846 Hey, I'm swimming here. Go find your own mirage. 1.3193 0.05328 119 88 24 7
847 Loser buys drinks, right? 1.3193 0.05460 119 89 22 8
848 The name 'Sisyphean Adventures' should have sounded an alarm bell 1.3193 0.05589 119 90 20 9
849 No, I do not think a sailboat would have been faster. 1.3193 0.05589 119 90 20 9
850 Row all you want, but we're in the same boat. 1.3193 0.05328 119 88 24 7
851 Always showboating. 1.3193 0.05328 119 88 24 7
852 One more verse of "Michael, Row the Boat Ashore," and I'll kill you. 1.3193 0.05460 119 89 22 8
853 Again - You start singing after I've sung - 'Row-Row-Row your BOAT!' Why is this so difficult?! 1.3167 0.05421 120 90 22 8
854 It's not about the destination, it's about the journey. 1.3162 0.05381 117 87 23 7
855 Hey, watch the wake! Can't you see I'm swimming here? 1.3162 0.05648 117 89 19 9
856 Hey, you wrecked my sandcastle! 1.3162 0.05648 117 89 19 9
857 I'm looking for my contact lens. 1.3162 0.05516 117 88 21 8
858 I noticed you slowed down; everything okay? 1.3162 0.05100 117 85 27 5
859 I'll get back in later. I just want to swim for a while. 1.3162 0.05381 117 87 23 7
860 My father crawled through this desert. My grandfather crawled through this desert. What makes you think you can just row on in here. 1.3162 0.05516 117 88 21 8
861 Bill, maybe the tide's just out. 1.3162 0.04953 117 84 29 4
862 Yelling 'stroke' won't get us anywhere 1.3162 0.05648 117 89 19 9
863 Yes, I CAN believe that Arizona is a cheaper than Nantucket in the summer. 1.3162 0.05777 117 90 17 10
864 Hey, man, are you just gonna let me drown? 1.3162 0.05381 117 87 23 7
865 Slow down! You know I don't swim that well! 1.3162 0.05381 117 87 23 7
866 You haven't happened to see a contact lens around here have you? 1.3162 0.05100 117 85 27 5
867 Can you throw me a life jacket? I've been treading sand for days. 1.3162 0.05648 117 89 19 9
868 Global warming my ass. 1.3162 0.05777 117 90 17 10
869 Do you mind buddy? You just rowed over my sand castle! 1.3162 0.05516 117 88 21 8
870 I've perfected my crawl. 1.3162 0.05777 117 90 17 10
871 Don't you think you're going a little overboard? 1.3162 0.06027 117 92 13 12
872 "How come you always get to row"? 1.3162 0.05100 117 85 27 5
873 Can't we wait until the tide comes in? 1.3162 0.04953 117 84 29 4
874 You started before I said, 'GO'! 1.3162 0.05381 117 87 23 7
875 Quick, toss me a life jacket! 1.3162 0.05777 117 90 17 10
876 Looks like we're both in the same boat. 1.3162 0.05242 117 86 25 6
877 Grandpa said they privatized the EPA to finance some big wall project 1.3162 0.05903 117 91 15 11
878 'Gently down the stream,' my ass. 1.3162 0.05648 117 89 19 9
879 Thanks man. Now I'll never find my contact. 1.3162 0.05777 117 90 17 10
880 Uber for Sam? 1.3162 0.05777 117 90 17 10
881 Well, I call it glass half empty. 1.3162 0.05648 117 89 19 9
882 I know we're not in the same boat, but I do feel we are fellow travelers. 1.3162 0.04953 117 84 29 4
883 Are you...Michael? 1.3162 0.05648 117 89 19 9
884 Next time, yell, 'on your left.' 1.3162 0.04802 117 83 31 3
885 If you say 'land ho' one more time I'll capsize you. 1.3162 0.05777 117 90 17 10
886 When you get to the oasis, order me a dry martini. 1.3162 0.05777 117 90 17 10
887 When you reach shore, please send help. 1.3136 0.05476 118 89 21 8
888 I hallucinate therefore I am. 1.3136 0.05205 118 87 25 6
889 Either you're a mirage or I'm a mirage. I'm hoping I'm the mirage. 1.3136 0.05342 118 88 23 7
890 Quit making waves! 1.3136 0.05476 118 89 21 8
891 I still say climate change is a hoax. 1.3130 0.05435 115 86 22 7
892 For the last time, it doesn't go, "I've been to the desert with the oars with no name." 1.3130 0.05709 115 88 18 9
893 Watch it! I'm hallucinating here! 1.3130 0.05293 115 85 24 6
894 When will you global warming deniers admit you are wrong? 1.3130 0.05435 115 86 22 7
895 You STILL think global warming is a hoax? 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
896 It's one thing to be tenacious, it's another to be stupid. 1.3130 0.05970 115 90 14 11
897 Come on in the sand is great 1.3130 0.05293 115 85 24 6
898 Hey watch it, I'm crawling here. 1.3130 0.05147 115 84 26 5
899 At least Trump wasn't lying when he said he was going to "drain the swamp". 1.3130 0.05147 115 84 26 5
900 Gently? Gently down the stream....really? 1.3130 0.05293 115 85 24 6
901 Mine sank in a sand storm! 1.3130 0.05435 115 86 22 7
902 Mirage or not, I'm coming aboard. 1.3130 0.05293 115 85 24 6
903 Mine developed a leak. 1.3130 0.04997 115 83 28 4
904 Excuse me, when is high tide? 1.3130 0.05293 115 85 24 6
905 Hey, stay in your lane; you're drifting into my hallucination. 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
906 Let me guess – your mirage has water. 1.3130 0.05147 115 84 26 5
907 Dammit, I spent all morning on that sand castle! 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
908 Are we there yet? 1.3130 0.05147 115 84 26 5
909 I promise I won't be so negative. Can I please get back in the boat? 1.3130 0.05435 115 86 22 7
910 As dry humor, this just doesn't cut it. 1.3130 0.05709 115 88 18 9
911 I will not go get two of every animal 1.3130 0.05293 115 85 24 6
912 Michael, I think you have taken this "Row Your Boat Ashore" a bit too far. 1.3130 0.05147 115 84 26 5
913 Say 'man overboard' one more time. 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
914 Is that what they call "death row"? 1.3130 0.05970 115 90 14 11
915 The future of Row v. Wade. 1.3130 0.05841 115 89 16 10
916 I told you, we're not rowing one more inch until I find my contact lens! 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
917 Let me guess, you're out of water. 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
918 Not if I have to bail. 1.3130 0.05435 115 86 22 7
919 Hey, watch it -- I just lost a contact. 1.3130 0.05147 115 84 26 5
920 No Brian, for the thousandth time, crawling is MUCH better cardio. 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
921 I don’t care that it used to be an ocean! 1.3130 0.05293 115 85 24 6
922 Please let me in the boat, I can't swim! 1.3130 0.05147 115 84 26 5
923 No, I'm NOT concerned about the tide coming back in. 1.3130 0.04842 115 82 30 3
924 There are limits to positive thinking, Philip. 1.3130 0.05435 115 86 22 7
925 Let's face it Bill. Your GPS must be off. 1.3130 0.05435 115 86 22 7
926 Do you mind? I'm crawling here! 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
927 Nope, just a mirage. Let's keep rowing. 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
928 Let's switch, I'm getting tired. 1.3130 0.05293 115 85 24 6
929 Yeah, it’s my new boat and I thought I’d give it a dry run. 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
930 Shouting "overboard!" isn't funny anymore, Terry. 1.3130 0.05709 115 88 18 9
931 "What do you mean we're not in the same boat? 1.3130 0.05147 115 84 26 5
932 When do you think they will refill the swamp? 1.3130 0.05709 115 88 18 9
933 Thanks, dumb ass! You just rowed over my lobster traps. 1.3130 0.05709 115 88 18 9
934 Didn't I see you in a New Yorker cartoon last week? 1.3130 0.05709 115 88 18 9
935 Because I don't have as good an imagination as you, Larry; THAT'S why! 1.3130 0.05293 115 85 24 6
936 Look on the bright side - at least you're not up the creek without a paddle! 1.3130 0.04842 115 82 30 3
937 You want the 'desert island' cartoon, different page. 1.3130 0.05709 115 88 18 9
938 Still beat a day at the office? 1.3130 0.05435 115 86 22 7
939 Watch it, pal! This is a no wake zone! 1.3130 0.05147 115 84 26 5
940 Have you ever trained a fighter before? 1.3130 0.05970 115 90 14 11
941 Do you realize that you don't have both oars in the water? 1.3130 0.05574 115 87 20 8
942 You want me to get into the boat when you do not have any life jackets? 1.3109 0.05303 119 89 23 7
943 I take it this is your first Regatta. 1.3109 0.05566 119 91 19 9
944 I shouldn't have pulled the plug. 1.3103 0.05797 116 90 16 10
945 Stay in your lane! 1.3077 0.05216 117 87 24 6
946 Can we switch? I am tired of treading sand! 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
947 Dang it, Michael. You just don't know when to quit. Do you? 1.3070 0.05157 114 84 25 5
948 Let's switch, I want to cross train. 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
949 Whoa buddy! This is a no wake zone. 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
950 So global warming is a hoax! 1.3070 0.05727 114 88 17 9
951 Hey, thats the HOV lane! 1.3070 0.05157 114 84 25 5
952 Can I be Captain Ahab and you be Moby Dick now? 1.3070 0.05449 114 86 21 7
953 took you long enough. 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
954 Okay right after I spit underneath the paddle, you row! 1.3070 0.05861 114 89 15 10
955 Let's switch. You swim. I'll row. 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
956 Does this look like gently down the stream to you? 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
957 Maybe for you it's all smooth sailing, but for me life's a beach! 1.3070 0.05449 114 86 21 7
958 I hate Apple Maps. 1.3070 0.05449 114 86 21 7
959 Watch out for the rapids! 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
960 There's a desert island straight ahead. 1.3070 0.05727 114 88 17 9
961 I told you to bring the damn sail! 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
962 Mike, please. You can stop rowing your boat ashore. 1.3070 0.05727 114 88 17 9
963 We haven't passed water for days! 1.3070 0.05861 114 89 15 10
964 Quit showboating, Dave. 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
965 Which way you heading? 1.3070 0.05449 114 86 21 7
966 No, thanks. I think I'll crawl. 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
967 Stop splashing sand in my face! 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
968 I'm on the starboard tack. I've clearly got the right of way. 1.3070 0.05449 114 86 21 7
969 Did you find my bottle with a note in it? 1.3070 0.05449 114 86 21 7
970 Can you please stop yelling "stroke?" 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
971 No, the irony DOESN'T delight me. 1.3070 0.05449 114 86 21 7
972 Hey ! ! ! Watch your wake ! ! ! 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
973 Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily my ass. 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
974 So what if I’m NOT the first man to swim across the Oklahoma Panhandle? 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
975 You said I could row at the last dune. 1.3070 0.04846 114 82 29 3
976 No thanks, there's an Uber on the way 1.3070 0.05157 114 84 25 5
977 Climate change denier? 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
978 Permission to climb aboard, Captain? 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
979 It's time to admit it. A boat is NOT better than nothing. 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
980 An optimist would see the boat half full. 1.3070 0.05861 114 89 15 10
981 Hey! No wake zone! 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
982 You know darn well it's my turn to row. 1.3070 0.05727 114 88 17 9
983 Can we talk about something other than your boat for once? 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
984 Really? Life is STILL a dream? 1.3070 0.05157 114 84 25 5
985 This can't be happening; I don't believe in global warming. 1.3070 0.05861 114 89 15 10
986 I resent everything about your mirage. 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
987 You didn't think I could swim, did you? 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
988 You should’ve stopped rowing when you hit the beach! 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
989 "Recalculate! Damn you. Recalculate! 1.3070 0.05449 114 86 21 7
990 Wait! Don't leave me! 1.3070 0.05305 114 85 23 6
991 Of course I'm upstream without a paddle ! 1.3070 0.05590 114 87 19 8
992 I still say climate change is a hoax. 1.3043 0.05946 115 91 13 11
993 Stop rowing so I can get in. 1.3043 0.05408 115 87 21 7
994 It's called "the crawl." What's your stroke? 1.3043 0.05119 115 85 25 5
995 Hallelujah Michael, you DID get the boat ashore 1.3043 0.05816 115 90 15 10
996 Of course, you're not tired, you're in the boat! 1.3043 0.05408 115 87 21 7
997 Don't drink the sand. It will only make you more thirsty. 1.3043 0.05548 115 88 19 8
998 What do you mean 'I don't do transfers' 1.3043 0.05265 115 86 23 6
999 My turn to row. 1.3043 0.05119 115 85 25 5
1000 You're too late. This hasn't been an ocean for 10,000 years. 1.3043 0.05548 115 88 19 8
1001 Row, row, row all you want. Just, for God's sake, stop singing. 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1002 Watch your wake 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1003 Is this the way to the Climate Accord? 1.3009 0.05166 113 84 24 5
1004 I can't believe you passed me. 1.3009 0.05316 113 85 22 6
1005 Don't you know any other songs? 1.3009 0.05316 113 85 22 6
1006 Pass on the right! 1.3009 0.05166 113 84 24 5
1007 For the last time, I'm not going to drown! 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1008 And I thought I was lost. 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1009 Can I get a lift to the next mirage? 1.3009 0.04850 113 82 28 3
1010 You know I can't swim ... throw me the life preserver! 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1011 I feel like you DO need directions. 1.3009 0.05316 113 85 22 6
1012 One more 'merrily' and you're capsized! 1.3009 0.05606 113 87 18 8
1013 I'm HAVING a stroke! 1.3009 0.05316 113 85 22 6
1014 Actually, why don't we both get up and walk? 1.3009 0.05010 113 83 26 4
1015 I think the least you could do is share your mirage with me. 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1016 You didn't read the reviews before booking, did you? 1.3009 0.05166 113 84 24 5
1017 I'll get back in if you promise to quit singing 'Row, Row, Row Your Boat.' 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1018 I thought you said we were going for dessert. 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1019 Just add water. 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1020 Do you know the way to San Jose? 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1021 You just couldn't pull over and ask for directions? 1.3009 0.04850 113 82 28 3
1022 Are you Row? I'm Wade. 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1023 Wanna race? 1.3009 0.05745 113 88 16 9
1024 Can I get a ride? I can't swim. 1.3009 0.05745 113 88 16 9
1025 Man overboard! Captain! Man overboard! 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1026 Merrily? Dream? Really? 1.3009 0.05606 113 87 18 8
1027 If you come across two guys following a prancing Majorette, tell 'em I took a wrong turn at the last mirage. 1.3009 0.05316 113 85 22 6
1028 How come you always get to row and I have to swim? 1.3009 0.04850 113 82 28 3
1029 Please help me, I can't swim. 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1030 Jesus, Marvin! Just admit you were wrong about global warming! 1.3009 0.05316 113 85 22 6
1031 We should’ve stopped when we reached land. 1.3009 0.05745 113 88 16 9
1032 "Dissolve the EPA," you said! "What's the worst that could happen?" you said! 1.3009 0.05606 113 87 18 8
1033 Which one of us is the mirage. 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1034 I may be thirsty but I'm not crazy. 1.3009 0.05606 113 87 18 8
1035 Help! I'm drowning. 1.3009 0.05606 113 87 18 8
1036 Watch it man I'm swimming here 1.3009 0.05745 113 88 16 9
1037 Okay, it's your turn to push... 1.3009 0.05606 113 87 18 8
1038 You can lead a man to drink but you can't make him water 1.3009 0.05316 113 85 22 6
1039 No wonder the Aral Sea getaway package was so cheap 1.3009 0.06144 113 91 10 12
1040 I don't care how much of a bargain it was, leave it! 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1041 Stop splashing sand on me! 1.3009 0.05606 113 87 18 8
1042 Would you PLEASE stop singing 'Row, Row, Row Your Boat'! 1.3009 0.05463 113 86 20 7
1043 What part of "no wake" don't you understand? 1.3000 0.05500 120 93 18 9
1044 I'm not leaving without my contact lense. 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
1045 I'll start rowing again, as soon as I can find my contact lense. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
1046 You smack sand in my face with that oar one more time, I'll sink your damn boat! 1.2982 0.05700 114 89 16 9
1047 I think the tide is turning. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
1048 Don't row so fast! 1.2982 0.05563 114 88 18 8
1049 My turn to row, your turn to swim. 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
1050 Get the hell off my lawn. 1.2982 0.05563 114 88 18 8
1051 I've been yelling, "Man overboard" for an hour! Are you going to jump in and save me or what?! 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
1052 The Nile? Turn left at the first pyramid. 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
1053 You just ruined my castle. 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
1054 Damn it, Noah! You said there would be a flood. Do you know how ridiculous we look? 1.2982 0.05127 114 85 24 5
1055 Would it kill you to let me row for a while? 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
1056 Hey, slow down. This is a no wake zone 1.2982 0.05276 114 86 22 6
1057 I told you we should have taken the Jeep. 1.2982 0.05563 114 88 18 8
1058 your Uber profile promised air conditioning! 1.2982 0.05421 114 87 20 7
1059 It's been an hour, it's my turn! 1.2982 0.04650 114 82 30 2
1060 I'm sorry, I can only pick up at an oasis. 1.2973 0.05665 111 86 17 8
1061 Damn it Michael. Quit it already. It is just a song! 1.2973 0.05808 111 87 15 9
1062 Hey, you. I've got the right-of-way. 1.2973 0.05214 111 83 23 5
1063 I fail to see how this floats your boat. 1.2973 0.05665 111 86 17 8
1064 No, it's a 5K crawlathon. Rowathon's next week. 1.2973 0.05054 111 82 25 4
1065 Next vacation let's go up a creek without a paddle. 1.2973 0.05519 111 85 19 7
1066 And I say it was abandoned for good reason! 1.2973 0.05214 111 83 23 5
1067 So pissed I forgot my fitbit. 1.2973 0.05519 111 85 19 7
1068 Climate change is real, Donald! 1.2973 0.05947 111 88 13 10
1069 Man overboard? - Very funny. 1.2973 0.05054 111 82 25 4
1070 You pledging a fraternity too? 1.2973 0.05665 111 86 17 8
1071 You can't leave me here. I'll drown! 1.2973 0.05368 111 84 21 6
1072 How many times must we hear "recalculating" before you get that you should have turned left at the beach? 1.2973 0.05665 111 86 17 8
1073 Your mirage might have water but mine doesn't 1.2973 0.05368 111 84 21 6
1074 Have you seen Wilson? 1.2973 0.05947 111 88 13 10
1075 If I wasn't such a masochist, you'd be a naked woman mirage. 1.2973 0.05808 111 87 15 9
1076 Are you 100% sure about this google map thingy? 1.2973 0.05665 111 86 17 8
1077 It's a nursery rhyme, Bill. Not a survival technique. 1.2973 0.05665 111 86 17 8
1078 Goddamn, Google maps. 1.2973 0.05808 111 87 15 9
1079 I'll get in when the flood starts and not a minute before. 1.2973 0.05368 111 84 21 6
1080 Thank God! Is your name Michael? 1.2973 0.05214 111 83 23 5
1081 Oh sure, ask me to paddle now that we are approaching a dune! 1.2973 0.05214 111 83 23 5
1082 We shoulda listened to Al Gore. 1.2973 0.05368 111 84 21 6
1083 Could you give me a ride to the next mirage? 1.2973 0.05054 111 82 25 4
1084 Hallelujah! Michael rowed the boat ashore! 1.2973 0.05519 111 85 19 7
1085 It’s not funny anymore, Moses. Put the water back. 1.2973 0.05519 111 85 19 7
1086 Can't you just skip the damn 'life is but a dream' part? 1.2973 0.05368 111 84 21 6
1087 Put a life jacket on, you fool. 1.2973 0.05214 111 83 23 5
1088 I like your mirage better than mine! 1.2973 0.05519 111 85 19 7
1089 Wha'd'ya' mean there's another one behind you? 1.2973 0.05054 111 82 25 4
1090 No, I haven't seen the lake. 1.2973 0.05519 111 85 19 7
1091 What d'ya mean, you're 'out of water'?! 1.2973 0.05519 111 85 19 7
1092 No, I haven't seen the great white camel. 1.2973 0.05519 111 85 19 7
1093 IS life but a dream? 1.2973 0.05368 111 84 21 6
1094 Mind if I draft? 1.2973 0.05368 111 84 21 6
1095 Hey Michael, It's just a song! 1.2973 0.05808 111 87 15 9
1096 I miss the good old days on our tiny island with the one palm tree. 1.2973 0.05665 111 86 17 8
1097 For the last time I am still going to call it Global Warming! 1.2973 0.05947 111 88 13 10
1098 One of us has got this wrong. 1.2973 0.05519 111 85 19 7
1099 You fool! High tide won't be for another eight years! 1.2973 0.05368 111 84 21 6
1100 Do you still think climate change isn't real? 1.2973 0.05368 111 84 21 6
1101 Wait 'till the tide comes back in. 1.2973 0.05214 111 83 23 5
1102 This was a lake when I started... Damn global warming. 1.2946 0.05621 112 87 17 8
1103 Slow Down! 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
1104 I know you're a mirage because there's cold beer in your boat. 1.2946 0.05762 112 88 15 9
1105 Maybe we'll find a desert island. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
1106 You rowed the boat ashore three days ago, Michael. 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
1107 Hey! You know common courtesy calls for you saying "passing on your left" 1.2946 0.05016 112 83 25 4
1108 I can't swim 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
1109 Race you back? 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
1110 For the last time, put on your life jacket! 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
1111 Sorry, I'm just following my GPS too! 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
1112 I didn't think this was what he meant when he said he'd drain the swamp. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
1113 Stop flicking sand in my face! 1.2946 0.05621 112 87 17 8
1114 Hey, buddy...I'm drowning here! 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
1115 That's weird, I didn't hear anything about a small craft advisory. 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
1116 Really wish you'd stop singing that damn song. 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
1117 When does the tide come in? 1.2946 0.05476 112 86 19 7
1118 Aren't you worried without a life jacket? 1.2946 0.05174 112 84 23 5
1119 Yeah, my GPS gave me this alternate route too. 1.2946 0.05327 112 85 21 6
1120 One of us is losing it. 1.2946 0.05621 112 87 17 8
1121 Ha! Ha! You fool, I punched a hole in the bottom of the boat, just in case you left without me. You won't get far. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1122 Don't give up now! Every beach ends at water! 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1123 No I'll be fine thanks. You don't get many sharks this far south. 1.2909 0.05826 110 87 14 9
1124 If you won't let me get in the boat, you could at least throw me a life jacket. 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
1125 I know a shortcut but you're going to have to help me carry the boat across a river. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1126 No fair -- you rode the tsunami in. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1127 What did you do to the albatross? 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1128 How about a lift to the next sand dune. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1129 You idiot, you forgot the life jackets. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1130 Shut-up and row! It was your idea to leave the country if he won! 1.2909 0.05967 110 88 12 10
1131 I think it´s my turn to row. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1132 Hey, you should be wearing your life jacket! 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
1133 I should be doing the rowing,you know I can't swim! 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1134 At least you could throw me a life jacket. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1135 Please, no wake. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1136 Only a fool would take on the Sahara without a coxswain 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1137 O.K., I'll say it, you are the world's most dedicated lifeguard. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1138 I see you got the leak fixed. Good job! 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1139 I ordered a black car. 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
1140 It's your turn to crawl! 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1141 I knew we should have asked for directions at that oasis! 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
1142 Stop singing 'This Sand Is Your Sand' and let me on your boat. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1143 I get to row at the next mirage 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
1144 I've been swimming for an hour. Its time to switch. 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
1145 You optimists tick me off! 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1146 Dude you gotta relax, it is not a race! 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1147 We could solve both of our problems with a little water. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1148 Can't you see I'm drowning here. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1149 I can't believe you threw me overboard. You know i can't walk. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1150 Just wait for high tide and then we will make some real time. 1.2909 0.04892 110 81 26 3
1151 You're trespassing on my mirage. 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1152 You could have wished for two seats. 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
1153 Michael, STOP rowing your boat ashore! 1.2909 0.05826 110 87 14 9
1154 This is ridiculous, I'm quitting CrossFit. 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
1155 I was joking. Let me back in the boat! 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1156 Get the hell out of my mirage! 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
1157 Could you at least have said "on your left?" 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1158 For god's sake, man, can't you see we're in the wrong cartoon? 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1159 I still remember when slow wi-fi was my biggest problem. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1160 I know you are a mirage because I can't swim. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1161 How come I have to swim? 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1162 I think I'm dying of heat stroke, stroke, stroke! 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1163 Come back! You know I can't crawl! 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1164 Don't blame me, I voted for Her. 1.2909 0.06105 110 89 10 11
1165 One of us is an illusion. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1166 I've been treading sand this whole time, and you have a boat!? 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
1167 Next mirage, I get to row! 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
1168 You got your wish. He parted the whole sea. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1169 GPS ain't what it used to be 1.2909 0.05059 110 82 24 4
1170 Please tell me it's not my turn to row. 1.2909 0.05967 110 88 12 10
1171 Want a coxswain? 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1172 I can't find your contact anywhere! 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1173 You're complaining? You're the one in the boat! 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1174 I hope you remember where we parked the car. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1175 Hey!! I'm crawlin' here! I'm crawlin' here! 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1176 You're asking me for a glass of water? 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1177 You know I can't swim! 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1178 Remember when life was but a dream? 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
1179 Don't give me that Merrily Merrily Life is But a Dream crap. 1.2909 0.05379 110 84 20 6
1180 Sisyphus had it relatively easy 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
1181 At this point I officially declare that - THE TIDE IS OUT! 1.2909 0.05532 110 85 18 7
1182 "Would you PLEASE quit singing "Row, row , row your boat"? 1.2909 0.05967 110 88 12 10
1183 What desert isle! You're in the wrong cartoon. 1.2909 0.05222 110 83 22 5
1184 You know, that's a two-stroke penalty for grounding your club in the sand. 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1185 When I was your age, we didn't have fancy boats. We CRAWLED to where we needed to be. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1186 And you call yourself a mirage? 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1187 I didn't know we were allowed to actually use our mirages. 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1188 Could you slow down? My skis slipped off. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1189 What took you so long? 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1190 It would be easier if we agreed on compatible hallucinations! 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1191 You don't seem to have a lot of room. I'm going to wait for the next one. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1192 This is a "No Wake" zone, you jerk! 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1193 It's my turn in the mirage 1.2883 0.05635 111 87 16 8
1194 Michael, I said, "DON'T row the boat ashore!" 1.2883 0.05779 111 88 14 9
1195 You think you know where you're going, but you're in De-Nile. 1.2883 0.05337 111 85 20 6
1196 That's the last time we sign up for a DIY cruise! 1.2844 0.04893 109 81 25 3
1197 Shouldn't you be wearing a life preserver? 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1198 My turn to row. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1199 What do you mean you can't swim.... 1.2844 0.04893 109 81 25 3
1200 Tell me when you want to take a break. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1201 OK, I'll help bail if you let me back in. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1202 Thanks, I'll wait for the next dune buggy. 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1203 I hate to break it to you brother, but you're no better off than I am. 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1204 Face it, we're both deserted. 1.2844 0.05842 109 87 13 9
1205 Would you stop rowing for just a minute and help me find my contact lens?! 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1206 So much for 'life is but a dream,' Harold. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1207 Just looking for my contact lens. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1208 Let's row to the Bermuda Triangle he says... it'll be fun he says... 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1209 This row versus wade debate is exhausting! 1.2844 0.05842 109 87 13 9
1210 You said 'sun and sand', Jeremy. You did NOT mention water. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1211 Michael your boat was ashore 4 days ago! 1.2844 0.04893 109 81 25 3
1212 Can I catch a ride in your mirage? 1.2844 0.04893 109 81 25 3
1213 The least you could do is throw me a life preserver. 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1214 Look, I still can't find your contact lens! Let's just keep going. 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1215 Would you perchance be in need of a coxswain? 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1216 I'll get in the boat after I find my contact lens. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1217 We reached the shore miles ago. I'm done proving it. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1218 Grey Poupon? 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1219 And still, you deny climate change? 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1220 When you find yourself running aground, the first rule is: Stop rowing! 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1221 Have you seen a golf ball? 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1222 Of course, that's a great chest and arms workout,but I'm getting total body fitness! 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1223 This gym is clearly overcharging. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1224 You forgot the fishing poles?! 1.2844 0.05842 109 87 13 9
1225 Remind me again, what are we training for? 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1226 Have you seen a white whale? 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1227 Please! No more "row, row, row your boat"! 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1228 How could you forget the life preserver? 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1229 You seen my keys? 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1230 Will you please stop rowing, I'm trying to find my contact. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1231 Isn't it my turn yet? 1.2844 0.05842 109 87 13 9
1232 'Life is but a dream.' Yeah, right. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1233 It's my turn now. 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1234 I think you're in the wrong mirage. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1235 Get out of my mirage. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1236 Believe me yet? I told you not to vote for him! 1.2844 0.05986 109 88 11 10
1237 Come on, I'm drowning here! 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1238 No, it's not the Australian crawl, it's just the crawl. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1239 Use your core, man! It's all about the core! 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1240 Does it look like I have an extra sextant? 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1241 Hey, my sandcastle! 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1242 Your technique is not the problem! 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1243 Well, you don't have to do it so merrily! 1.2844 0.05842 109 87 13 9
1244 What happened to yesterday's mirage with the motor?! 1.2844 0.04893 109 81 25 3
1245 Alright, maybe global warming wasn't invented by the Chinese. 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1246 At least one of us is lost. 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1247 Quit splashing me! 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1248 I don't suppose you've got a spare life jacket. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1249 Don't be ridiculous. Of course global warming is a hoax 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1250 Life is but a dream, eh! 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1251 No! I have right of way. 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1252 You're in the crawl lane, a**hole! 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1253 So you had to say, 'Come Hell or high water?' 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1254 I hope your boat sinks! 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1255 You must be Michael. 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1256 Oil the damn oarlocks, they're driving me crazy! 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1257 High tide be damned, I think we can rest now. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1258 I could help you row, and we'll get there faster. 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1259 Stop with the gently down the stream ok? 1.2844 0.04893 109 81 25 3
1260 Yeah, I missed the boat. So what? 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1261 This is the last time I accept a "free" trip anywhere! 1.2844 0.04893 109 81 25 3
1262 Race you!! 1.2844 0.05986 109 88 11 10
1263 Rescue at last! My name is Donner. The rest of my party are unable to join us. 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1264 One of us is hallucinating and I'm hoping that it's you. 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1265 Is that you Michael? 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1266 No thanks; it doesn't look safe. 1.2844 0.04893 109 81 25 3
1267 So you're not even going to help me look for my contact? 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1268 Mr. Fancy--up shit creek, with TWO paddles! 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1269 For the last time, it's not a beach and I don't need a lifeguard. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1270 Sorry, I'm currently only accepting women and children. 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1271 Is it my turn to row yet? 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1272 Watch where you're going ! You just missed me. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1273 I'm telling you, without my contacts I can't see where we're headed! 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1274 I can't say I share your optimism. 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1275 Crawl was always my best stroke. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1276 What a moron, how could you not notice I fell overboard three days ago? 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1277 Great, now you're going all dinghy on me! 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1278 Any Grey Poupon? 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1279 Do you mind?! Your wake is slowing me down! 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1280 That's the last time I hire a safari guide through Craigslist. 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1281 I no longer care that this used to be an ocean! 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1282 If you ask me to say stroke one more time I am going to have one. 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1283 Nuts! I was sure climate change was a hoax! 1.2844 0.05695 109 86 15 8
1284 Stop! I just lost a contact lens. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1285 Hey! Why don't you look where you're going? 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1286 No, I didn't see a great white whale. 1.2818 0.05649 110 87 15 8
1287 I told you, I'd rather swim. 1.2818 0.05024 110 83 23 4
1288 Let's stop a while and see if we can catch some fish. 1.2818 0.05346 110 85 19 6
1289 No offense, but you are the worst mirage ever. 1.2818 0.05346 110 85 19 6
1290 So, what kinda mileage are you getting? 1.2804 0.05442 107 83 18 6
1291 OK, Michael, we've been ashore for hours. Now what? 1.2804 0.05108 107 81 22 4
1292 I don't know, why do you think the boat feels lighter? 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1293 Old Testament story cut by editor: Noah joins forces with Moses. 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1294 Really? You think you need four "merrily"s? 1.2804 0.05602 107 84 16 7
1295 Did the Groupon explicitly mention water was included? 1.2804 0.04560 107 78 28 1
1296 I hope you spring a leak. 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1297 I've been assured that life is but a dream. 1.2804 0.05442 107 83 18 6
1298 Because I'd rather burn my hands and feet than explaining you one more time what 'irony' is. 1.2804 0.05442 107 83 18 6
1299 You think you have it hard? At least you've got a boat! 1.2804 0.05602 107 84 16 7
1300 Yes, we're both tired, thirsty and hungry - but other than that, we're not really in the same boat. 1.2804 0.05442 107 83 18 6
1301 Are you my Uber ride? 1.2804 0.05108 107 81 22 4
1302 So, how is this dream about sex? 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1303 No, I don't know the way to San Jose. 1.2804 0.05108 107 81 22 4
1304 Ahoy Captain! Permission to call you an idiot! 1.2804 0.05442 107 83 18 6
1305 Hal-a-frickin'-looyah! Stop rowing, Michael!" 1.2804 0.05442 107 83 18 6
1306 So global warming is a hoax! 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1307 What I said was by land OR by sea. 1.2804 0.05757 107 85 14 8
1308 one of us is a mirage 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1309 You're rowing against the grains. 1.2804 0.05108 107 81 22 4
1310 I think we need a little less ebb and a lot more flow. 1.2804 0.05602 107 84 16 7
1311 Did I ever tell you just how much I detest your optimism?! 1.2804 0.05108 107 81 22 4
1312 Watch it, buddy. This is a no-wake zone. 1.2804 0.05108 107 81 22 4
1313 Will you quit with the "Merrily, Merrily, Merrily"! 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1314 Is that the only song you know?!? 1.2804 0.05602 107 84 16 7
1315 Throw me a life preserver! I can't swim. 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1316 Still think global warming fears are exaggerated? 1.2804 0.05757 107 85 14 8
1317 Would you happen to have some Grey Poupon? 1.2804 0.05602 107 84 16 7
1318 Oh yeah, now my ship has come in. 1.2804 0.05908 107 86 12 9
1319 I sing merrily, merrily and THEN you come in! 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1320 Thank God for Uberboat! 1.2804 0.05108 107 81 22 4
1321 For the last time, stop splashing me! 1.2804 0.05757 107 85 14 8
1322 It could be worse, it could be raining. 1.2804 0.04932 107 80 24 3
1323 No that's OK, I'll swim to shore. 1.2804 0.05442 107 83 18 6
1324 Your oar is in my lane, Buddy! 1.2804 0.04932 107 80 24 3
1325 Yes, I know how to swim, but what's your point? 1.2804 0.05108 107 81 22 4
1326 Call me Ishmael. What's your's? 1.2804 0.05602 107 84 16 7
1327 It was cute the first time you rowed the boat ashore, Michael, but now you're just showing off! 1.2804 0.05757 107 85 14 8
1328 What is wrong with you? A guy in a mirage should be driving a jeep! 1.2804 0.05602 107 84 16 7
1329 Hey!! I'm crawlin' here! I'm crawlin' here! 1.2804 0.05602 107 84 16 7
1330 I bet you didn't update your new GPS either. 1.2804 0.05442 107 83 18 6
1331 Stay in your lane! 1.2804 0.04932 107 80 24 3
1332 I told Uber to send a camel, not a metaphor! 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1333 Just wait 'til the tide turns. 1.2804 0.05908 107 86 12 9
1334 Well, hallelujah, Michael! 1.2804 0.05442 107 83 18 6
1335 Aw, come on, I can't swim. 1.2804 0.05757 107 85 14 8
1336 Get your own mirage 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1337 Global warming has a weird way of sneaking up on you. 1.2778 0.05067 108 82 22 4
1338 Why do you always get to row? 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1339 ...the bad news is, I think one of us still has to eat the other 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1340 Excuse me sir. I don't suppose you could spare a little water! 1.2778 0.05859 108 87 12 9
1341 Well, at least I'm one stage closer to 'acceptance' than you are! 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1342 Can I get a lift to the mirage? 1.2778 0.05398 108 84 18 6
1343 Worst mirage ever. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1344 So much for your prediction of rising ocean levels making this ideal beachfront property. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1345 WHO said it was a three hour tour? 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1346 Hey, your first meeting of Climate Deniers Anonymous too? 1.2778 0.05709 108 86 14 8
1347 Mom says to pick up some milk on your way back. 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1348 Beat it, pal! This is my mirage! 1.2736 0.04931 106 80 23 3
1349 What's this rising tide you keep yammering about? 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1350 You need a coxswain? 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1351 Fine then. I'll swim 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1352 Are we far enough away from Trump yet? 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1353 Life had better be but a dream. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1354 Would you please stop singing that damn song?!!? 1.2736 0.04931 106 80 23 3
1355 You'd better hurry up. The beach closes at sundown. 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1356 Enough training. I'm ready for the English Channel now. 1.2736 0.05771 106 85 13 8
1357 I admire your enthusiasm. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1358 You're just leaving me here to drown in your mirage? 1.2736 0.04931 106 80 23 3
1359 Oh no, they mixed the metaphors! 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1360 C'mon, let me in. I'm dying out here. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1361 For the love of Science, get out of the boat and admit global warming is real! 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1362 So life is but a dream, huh? 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1363 My turn to row now ... you swim! 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1364 Another mile and I'm switching to the butterfly. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1365 Move over sand rover. 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1366 Now they're saying no rain until Thursday. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1367 I texted for an Uber! 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1368 This is not what I expected when I wished for dry land. 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1369 at least you're up the creek with a paddle 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1370 But what do you do for your quads? 1.2736 0.04746 106 79 25 2
1371 Maybe with two of us rowing we could make it. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1372 I think we're stuck on a sandbar! 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1373 How about I row and you push? 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1374 The least you could do is throw me a life preserver. 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1375 I'm Sorry! Please, just let me get back in the boat! 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1376 But he said global warming wasn't real! 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1377 You know if you let me back in we could make better time . 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1378 No, thanks. I'll walk. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1379 Are you still a climate change skeptic? 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1380 Yes, but it is a really wet sand. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1381 You one percenters make me sick! 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1382 I always knew you didn't have all your oars in the water! 1.2736 0.05771 106 85 13 8
1383 How can I be sure it won't capsize? 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1384 If I had known this is what they meant by 'Uber Ultra Basic' I would have spent the extra 5 bucks! 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1385 I don't care if you can't swim-my turn 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1386 Hey! This is a no wake zone. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1387 Don't just stare; throw me a life preserver. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1388 Okay now try putting it in reverse. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1389 It would be a lot faster if you put up a sail. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1390 Let's just call for an Uber. 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1391 All we need is that rising tide. 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1392 When did you say the sea level would rise? 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1393 Michael, do you really think you can row your boat ashore? 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1394 Buy the rowboat, you said. It's nicer than the camel. 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1395 Can I borrow your sunscreen? 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1396 Dammit, feather your oars. 1.2736 0.05771 106 85 13 8
1397 Do you have any lip balm? 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1398 You came all this way and you didn't bring any water? 1.2736 0.05771 106 85 13 8
1399 Hey Mike, please stop rowing the boat ashore. 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1400 Enough is enough - download the Google Maps update! 1.2736 0.05771 106 85 13 8
1401 And life is NOT a dream 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1402 Michael, they were saying to row ashore, not onshore. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1403 So which one of us is seeing the mirage? 1.2736 0.04931 106 80 23 3
1404 Okay, Michael. Go on and row the boat ashore you asshole. 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1405 Can I borrow your phone charger? 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1406 For the hundredth time, it's not "gently down the seam." 1.2736 0.05283 106 82 19 5
1407 Slow Down! This is a low wake zone. 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1408 Never seen the tide so low. 1.2736 0.04746 106 79 25 2
1409 I don't care if getting there is half the fun, you look like an idiot! 1.2736 0.05613 106 84 15 7
1410 So you still think global warming's a hoax? 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1411 Help me find my car keys and we'll drive out. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1412 Sorry, last marina I saw was at the mirage about 30 miles back. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1413 Lucky you. My boat sprung a leak. 1.2736 0.05110 106 81 21 4
1414 Well it wasn't my idea to come to California! 1.2710 0.05240 107 83 19 5
1415 Quick, toss me a life jacket! 1.2710 0.05405 107 84 17 6
1416 Michael - enough already. Stop rowing! 1.2710 0.05240 107 83 19 5
1417 Do you happen to have a life vest? 1.2710 0.04892 107 81 23 3
1418 What do you mean your trying to find the dry dock? 1.2710 0.05240 107 83 19 5
1419 In retrospect I don't think I was the problem. 1.2710 0.05566 107 85 15 7
1420 Heat stroke, heat stroke, heat stroke... 1.2710 0.05405 107 84 17 6
1421 Gently down the STREAM, Ian, gently down the STREAM! 1.2710 0.05722 107 86 13 8
1422 So, do you still deny climate change? 1.2710 0.05069 107 82 21 4
1423 I'm doing the crawl. What are you doing? 1.2710 0.04892 107 81 23 3
1424 If you can row on sand, I can crawl on water! 1.2710 0.05069 107 82 21 4
1425 Why do you always get to ride in the boat? 1.2710 0.05069 107 82 21 4
1426 "I'll race ya". 1.2710 0.05405 107 84 17 6
1427 Hell and back, or one way? 1.2710 0.05722 107 86 13 8
1428 I should have updated the GPS. 1.2710 0.05566 107 85 15 7
1429 Say "sculling" one more time and I'll break your oars. 1.2710 0.05566 107 85 15 7
1430 Hey man, you're in the wrong cartoon. 1.2710 0.05566 107 85 15 7
1431 Michael, how long are you going to row your boat ashore? 1.2710 0.05240 107 83 19 5
1432 Next time I'm booking the cruise. 1.2710 0.04708 107 80 25 2
1433 Going my way? 1.2710 0.04708 107 80 25 2
1434 Are you ready to admit now that there's a reason the river less travelled by is less travelled by? 1.2710 0.05566 107 85 15 7
1435 Sorry, but I liked the majorette in my last desert ordeal. 1.2710 0.05722 107 86 13 8
1436 Can we switch yet? 1.2710 0.04708 107 80 25 2
1437 You're going the wrong way! 1.2710 0.05240 107 83 19 5
1438 Please! Please! There are sand sharks everywhere!!!.... 1.2710 0.05566 107 85 15 7
1439 I say we switch at the next rest stop. 1.2710 0.05240 107 83 19 5
1440 Apparently we've reached the Dry Tortugas. 1.2710 0.05722 107 86 13 8
1441 We both could use a little water. 1.2710 0.05240 107 83 19 5
1442 Do you mind? I can't swim with your oar in the way! 1.2710 0.05405 107 84 17 6
1443 Where does gently down the stream come in? 1.2708 0.05635 96 75 16 5
1444 ~No Wake, dammit, No Wake!~ 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1445 Pound sand. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1446 Sorry, the last Starbuck's I saw was at least 3 mirages south. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1447 'Let's rent a house at the beach,' she said. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1448 Ok, then you be the visionary and I'll be the team player. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1449 Yeah, life is but a dream alright. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1450 Why don't I row and you do the swimming? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1451 I've heard of "Rowe v. Wade", but never "Row v. Crawl." 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1452 I dunno, but it sure beats rowing upstream without a paddle. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1453 No, no! You come in BEFORE "gently down the stream!" 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1454 Caught anything? 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1455 You gonna toss me a line or what? 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1456 Feel sorry for the next bastard who tells me he doesn't believe in climate change. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1457 Hey buddy, man overboard! 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1458 Watch out, sand sharks up ahead! 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1459 The fraternity can kiss my ass! 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1460 Finally 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1461 Okay Mike, you rode the boat ashore. What's the next verse say? 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1462 You need a plus-one for the diamond lane, pal! 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1463 Wish they'd call off this climate change hoax! 1.2692 0.05834 104 84 12 8
1464 Row harder. We're the last 2 climate skeptics. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1465 Sand, sand everywhere and not a grain to eat 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1466 Heat stroke, heat stroke, heat stroke... 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1467 You need a coxswain? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1468 Hey, I'm crawlin' here! 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1469 Can't you help a drowning man? 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1470 Are you seriously going to drop me off here? 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1471 Your irony is interfering with my stereotype 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1472 Really, beachfront property? 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1473 This IS land, you idiot! 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1474 Do you have any idea of how annoying you are? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1475 This is pedestrians only. 1.2692 0.04579 104 77 26 1
1476 Where's your life jacket??! 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1477 Why is it you kids always have to look for the easy way out of doing everything? 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1478 I asked you to wait! 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1479 You realize you're taking climate change denial to a whole new level? 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1480 If you must know, I was a coxswain for 4 years at Harvard. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1481 Isn't it about time you global warming deniers gave up? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1482 The OTHER way, you idiot! 1.2692 0.06146 104 86 8 10
1483 Can I get a ride? I can't swim any longer. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1484 It's safe to get out of the boat now. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1485 I prayed for water, not Walter! 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1486 My God, just how large is this beach! 1.2692 0.06146 104 86 8 10
1487 That's your wish?! 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1488 Wait, is El Niño or La Niña the wet one? 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1489 Let's switch. I play Rose and you play Jack. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1490 Have you seen my surfboard? 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1491 Guess what! That boat's a mirage too! 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1492 The hardest day of my life was the day I sold my boat. 1.2692 0.04779 104 78 24 2
1493 Stroke of genius my ass! 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1494 It's dessert, not desert. Be careful what you wish for! 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1495 What part of global are you not getting? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1496 Okay, no more megaphone. 1.2692 0.05992 104 85 10 9
1497 You must be one of those global warming skeptics. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1498 Joe, lets go back to gym membership. Its only 20 bucks a month. 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1499 Come on, lemme back in. I promise not to criticize your rowing technique again. 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1500 Sing "row, row, row your boat" one more time and I swear, your life WILL be but a dream!! 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1501 "Slow down would you? Can't you see I'm trying to find my contact lens? 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1502 You're not leaving without me! 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1503 Why do you always get to row downhill? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1504 I told you climate change is real! 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1505 I thought you said we were going for dessert. 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1506 And you forgot the life-jackets?! 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1507 I can take the heat - I can even take being lost - but I just can't take that song anymore! 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1508 Hey! Pass on the starboard! 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1509 Have you seen my glasses? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1510 I said merrily, dammit! 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1511 wait! You need a coxswain! 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1512 Where's your life vest? 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1513 Watch it! I'm crawling here! 1.2692 0.04970 104 79 22 3
1514 For the last time, stop saying there's no more room in the boat! 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1515 Michael! Stop rowing the boat ashore! 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1516 Yes, this is the other Dead Sea. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1517 What do you mean, 'The other choice was a camel'? 1.2692 0.05333 104 81 18 5
1518 Life is but a dream, right. 1.2692 0.05672 104 83 14 7
1519 There's sand in my suit. 1.2685 0.05675 108 87 13 8
1520 Quick sand my ass. 1.2685 0.05675 108 87 13 8
1521 Still sure this was a shortcut? 1.2685 0.05197 108 84 19 5
1522 That's what you get for asking to be transferred to dry land 1.2685 0.05520 108 86 15 7
1523 Only now do I appreciate the fact that you named your boat after your wife, Sandy. 1.2685 0.04853 108 82 23 3
1524 Let's hope we're all part of a mirage 1.2685 0.04853 108 82 23 3
1525 I believe, Michael, that you've clearly rowed your boat ashore. 1.2685 0.05361 108 85 17 6
1526 Coach, OK to switch to the backstroke< the crawl is killing me? 1.2685 0.05675 108 87 13 8
1527 You can stop now; you've scraped off all the barnacles. 1.2685 0.05028 108 83 21 4
1528 Michael, you've rowed far enough! 1.2685 0.05361 108 85 17 6
1529 We got it, Michael. Now please stop rowing our boat ashore. 1.2685 0.05675 108 87 13 8
1530 Why don't you cry me a river? 1.2667 0.05458 105 83 16 6
1531 O.k, o.k. Global warning exists. Now throw me a life preserver. 1.2667 0.05112 105 81 20 4
1532 I promise I believe in climate change now. 1.2667 0.05288 105 82 18 5
1533 What say we drop man-overboard training 'til we get to the coast ? 1.2667 0.05458 105 83 16 6
1534 Excuse me, this is a no wake zone! 1.2667 0.04929 105 80 22 3
1535 And you said Al Gore was full of it! 1.2667 0.04929 105 80 22 3
1536 Did you happen to find a set of keys? 1.2667 0.05112 105 81 20 4
1537 I think you can safely let me in the boat now. 1.2667 0.05288 105 82 18 5
1538 Get it right this time, Herb. When I get to 'gently' you come in with ' row, row, row'. 1.2667 0.05624 105 84 14 7
1539 Are you SURE this is going to be an Olympic sport? 1.2667 0.04929 105 80 22 3
1540 Hi this is Ezekiel did you order an Uber? 1.2667 0.05784 105 85 12 8
1541 Careful, it's pretty shallow ahead of you. 1.2667 0.04740 105 79 24 2
1542 Still don't believe in global warming? 1.2667 0.05112 105 81 20 4
1543 Can I get a lift? 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1544 I should try walking on the water? Now you tell me! 1.2621 0.06164 103 86 7 10
1545 I would give you a push but I am in the middle of Sun Salutation. 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1546 There still isn't a drop to drink. 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1547 What are you doing here in my mirage? 1.2621 0.04967 103 79 21 3
1548 No thanks; I'm waiting for an UberSelect. 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1549 For the last time, I don't need a life preserver! 1.2621 0.04967 103 79 21 3
1550 Global warming took all of the fun out of Lake Winnipesaukee. 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1551 So, do you still think that global warming is a hoax? 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1552 May the ocean rise to meet you. 1.2621 0.04967 103 79 21 3
1553 I saw it too, but at some point you have to admit it was just a mirage. 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1554 That "Land ahoy!" talk is getting to me, OK? 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1555 For the last time, it's my turn in the boat!! 1.2621 0.05682 103 83 13 7
1556 Different strokes for different folks. 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1557 I'm too much ballast? That's what you're most worried about? 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1558 No, I do NOT want to discuss Roe v Wade again! 1.2621 0.05682 103 83 13 7
1559 Who do you think you're calling a mirage? 1.2621 0.04967 103 79 21 3
1560 You're in the,wrong cartoon. 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1561 I'm really sorry to hear about the blisters on your hands. 1.2621 0.05682 103 83 13 7
1562 Can't you just toss me a life preserver? 1.2621 0.04568 103 77 25 1
1563 Admit it. We're lost! 1.2621 0.04967 103 79 21 3
1564 At least you've got a paddle. 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1565 How bout a ride to shore? 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1566 Keep rowing, Wikileaks said there was a beach here, the government is just hiding it from us. 1.2621 0.05847 103 84 11 8
1567 Caught anything? 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1568 Way to cut me off, buddy! 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1569 Row if you want to. I'm going to swim. 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1570 No, I nave NOT seen your camel! 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1571 Hey, Speed Racer! This is a no-wake zone! 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1572 Enough with the "Row, row, row your boat" already! 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1573 Well, are you going to just sit there and let me drown or pull me in? 1.2621 0.04355 103 76 27 0
1574 Drop anchor! I've lost my contact lens! 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1575 You told me we were going for dessert... 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1576 Stop! Can't you see I'm drowning here? 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1577 I feel like we left the stove on. 1.2621 0.05847 103 84 11 8
1578 No, dammit! You sing "row, row, row your boat" when I sing "gently down the stream!" 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1579 Stop yer splashin'! 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1580 I told you "Camels are the ships of the desert", but would you listen??? 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1581 Impressive rowing, but the camel is still the ship of the desert. 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1582 Don't feel bad. I could have sworn it was water, too! 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1583 Well now that you've lost the Professor and Marry Ann, it's down to us! 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1584 For the last time. It's a mirage 1.2621 0.04967 103 79 21 3
1585 Really, you're going to quote Donne to me? 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1586 Let’s call it a draw and just walk. 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1587 You're in denial. 1.2621 0.05847 103 84 11 8
1588 Another hour then it's my turn in the boat. 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1589 You were right - your way is faster. 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1590 This mirage ain't big enough for the two of us. 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1591 No, thanks, it's a nice day, I will swim. 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1592 When I was your age I'd crawl to school twenty miles each day in a sand storm uphill. 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1593 ... Life is but a dream. 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1594 Hey. No wake! 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1595 Trust me, if I can crawl on it... you can walk on it. 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1596 Save me! The place is teeming with sand sharks! 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1597 I'm crawlin' here! I'm crawlin' here! 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1598 I'd keep rowing. You're starting to look like a fried chicken sandwich. 1.2621 0.06008 103 85 9 9
1599 I assure you, it won't capsize if you stop and pull me in. 1.2621 0.04967 103 79 21 3
1600 You said it would be my turn soon...! 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1601 It's a marathon, not a sprint! 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1602 No, No, No!! You start row, row, row your boat, when I finish gently down the stream! 1.2621 0.05847 103 84 11 8
1603 Where's your life jacket??! 1.2621 0.05512 103 82 15 6
1604 You're a little dingy. 1.2621 0.05155 103 80 19 4
1605 Cross-training's a bitch, eh? 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1606 I thought tides were supposed to rise with global warming! 1.2621 0.04967 103 79 21 3
1607 You're not Uber! 1.2596 0.05465 104 83 15 6
1608 It's my turn to row now. 1.2596 0.05112 104 81 19 4
1609 "You should never, ever have questioned our guide's credentials". 1.2596 0.05633 104 84 13 7
1610 Front crawl, butterfly, breaststroke--sure. But I'm telling you, heatstroke is NOT a competitive event, Coach! 1.2596 0.05796 104 85 11 8
1611 Hey--that's not what "one if by land" means! 1.2596 0.05465 104 83 15 6
1612 Waze says it's clear sailing till we hit the 405. 1.2549 0.05692 102 83 12 7
1613 Do you take credit cards? 1.2549 0.04763 102 78 22 2
1614 We are in the same boat! 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1615 Hey, I'm walking here! 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1616 Why do you always get to steer? 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1617 What climate change? This is just cyclical! 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1618 Isn't climate change a bitch? 1.2549 0.04963 102 79 20 3
1619 This miracle lacks the wow factor, stick with walking on water. 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1620 Nice mirage, now can you conjure up some water to go with it?! 1.2549 0.04963 102 79 20 3
1621 Don't just sit there, I lost my contact lens! 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1622 Now will you turn on the GPS? 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
1623 Boat without water; you can't even do a mirage right! 1.2549 0.06023 102 85 8 9
1624 You keep forgetting that it is a dry heat. 1.2549 0.05692 102 83 12 7
1625 Are you sure that's a one-man dinghy? 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1626 Row v. whatever 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1627 You can stop singing that song now! 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1628 Yes, I've heard of sand sharks. 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1629 Stop hogging the rowing machine, it's my turn. 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1630 Row v. "Wait" 1.2549 0.05860 102 84 10 8
1631 I said merrily, merrily, merrily 1.2549 0.05692 102 83 12 7
1632 Hey, slow down. This is a no wake zone 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1633 This is not, 'just like crossfit.' 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1634 How many more miles until you admit it's a sea change? 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
1635 Thank God I found you. 1.2549 0.05692 102 83 12 7
1636 Are you running a local or express? 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1637 I think you are in total denial of our situation. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1638 Michael, you rowed your boat ashore, hallelujah! 1.2549 0.05692 102 83 12 7
1639 "For the last time Michael, row the boat ashore! 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1640 Whether it floats your boat is really not the point. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1641 Idiot! 1.2549 0.05692 102 83 12 7
1642 Do you honestly still think we might need the damn boat? 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
1643 exactly how did the ship sink? 1.2549 0.05860 102 84 10 8
1644 I know its my turn to row, but I get sea sick. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1645 You said it's my turn three dunes ago. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1646 No wake please! 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1647 You look like you need a coxswain. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1648 It's a reverse mirage. Keep paddling. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1649 Global warming? Nonsense! it's the media that's the problem! 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1650 Hey, I'm crawlin' here! 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1651 Your wake is disturbing my swim! 1.2549 0.04763 102 78 22 2
1652 What do you mean what am I doing! 1.2549 0.04963 102 79 20 3
1653 Why don't you get out and push? 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1654 Have you seen my contact lens by any chance? 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1655 My turn! 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1656 You just couldn't take directions from that camel could you! 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1657 Only 4 more years... 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
1658 I'm guessing you're one of those 'glass half-full' kind of guys. 1.2549 0.04963 102 79 20 3
1659 You're STILL denying climate science?!!! 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1660 Quit saying "Life is a beach", dammit! 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1661 Perception is reality? Give me a break, man. 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
1662 Let's see your mirage license. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1663 'Row, row, row your boat' got old when we hit land, Leonard. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1664 We're gonna need a bigger ocean. 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
1665 Remind me about how "climate warming" is bullshit and will have no effect whatsoever on our lives or leisure activities. 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
1666 Do I look like I know which way to water? 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1667 Michael, this is too far ashore. 1.2549 0.05692 102 83 12 7
1668 Whaddya mean, surge pricing? 1.2549 0.05860 102 84 10 8
1669 No! It is not my turn to row! 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1670 I would ask to get on board , but you don't have any life jackets . 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1671 Let me know when you want to switch places. 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1672 No... I'm not a @*<%ing mermaid! 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
1673 Still in denial? 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1674 Tomorrow, I get to row. 1.2549 0.04963 102 79 20 3
1675 If you think that's bad, try swimming. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1676 Pipe down with that "Merrily, Merrily" yammer, would you! 1.2549 0.04763 102 78 22 2
1677 That's what's wrong with rowing backwards. 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1678 Is this your idea of a watershed moment? 1.2549 0.04963 102 79 20 3
1679 You didn't happen to find one of my contacts back there, did you? 1.2549 0.04963 102 79 20 3
1680 You realize you've entered the swimming zone, don't you? 1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1681 It's alright for you in that rowboat - out here, life is anything but a dream. 1.2549 0.04963 102 79 20 3
1682 Slow down! I'm doing the crawl stroke. 1.2549 0.05692 102 83 12 7
1683 I thought you said it would rain, Noah! 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1684 And I thought I was the crazy one 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1685 Enough already just admit that Global Warming is real!! 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1686 You know something, it is a perfect way to get the barnacles off. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1687 I'm starting to re-think this whole "Global Warming is a scam" thing 1.2549 0.05518 102 82 14 6
1688 ONE OF US is seeing things! 1.2549 0.04763 102 78 22 2
1689 Yeah, that's right...I'm sick and tired of you always hogging the boat! 1.2549 0.05692 102 83 12 7
1690 I'm gonna win this race if it's the last thing I do. 1.2524 0.05470 103 83 14 6
1691 OK let's agree, you have your mirage and I have mine. 1.2524 0.05110 103 81 18 4
1692 Stroke! Stroke! Stroke! 1.2524 0.05641 103 84 12 7
1693 Hey, slow down!! 1.2500 0.05000 100 78 19 3
1694 Row on. Find your own cartoon! 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1695 Damn you! You told me you were going to "Make the Desert Great Again!" 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1696 For crying out loud! Today's legs, not upper body - get with the program! 1.2500 0.05000 100 78 19 3
1697 You're a lawyer too? Jeez, drain the swamp and bottom-feeders are the last to know! 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1698 This is a no wake zone! 1.2500 0.04794 100 77 21 2
1699 Boy,did you take a long time getting here. 1.2500 0.05752 100 82 11 7
1700 Couldn't you at least hallucinate something motorized? 1.2500 0.04578 100 76 23 1
1701 Hey...I had the right of way! 1.2500 0.05198 100 79 17 4
1702 One more 'merrily' and your life will be a nightmare! 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1703 It's "gently down the stream," you idiot. 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1704 And you said global warming was going to cause floods. Loser! 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1705 It's Michael row your boat ashore , not onshore. 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1706 You mirages really go all-out nowadays. 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1707 There is a ton of salt in this water. 1.2500 0.05752 100 82 11 7
1708 What do you mean, "Grab an oar?" 1.2500 0.05752 100 82 11 7
1709 It's about time you showed up. I was going under for the third time. 1.2500 0.05752 100 82 11 7
1710 How many times will you remind me that we're not in the same boat, Captain Obvious?!! 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1711 No, we swim this leg. 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1712 Is your name Michael? 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1713 A great white whale? Sure, one swam by a couple hours ago. 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1714 I get it, Chad, you rowed in college. 1.2500 0.05752 100 82 11 7
1715 You're in the,wrong cartoon. 1.2500 0.05000 100 78 19 3
1716 I'd help you row, but I lost my contacts. 1.2500 0.04794 100 77 21 2
1717 Do you have room for one more? 1.2500 0.05000 100 78 19 3
1718 If you yell stroke one more time I'm going to have one. 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1719 When is your turn to tread water? 1.2500 0.05198 100 79 17 4
1720 This is not what I envisioned when you said, you wanted to be the 1st to row around the world. 1.2500 0.05000 100 78 19 3
1721 Enough with the "life's is but a dream"!! 1.2500 0.05000 100 78 19 3
1722 I am not, singing another line of Row, Row, Row, your boat. 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1723 Wow, buddy, you're even more lost than I am. 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1724 Look where you're going! 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1725 Hallelujah! Is your name Michael? 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1726 NOW, can we call an Uber? 1.2500 0.05000 100 78 19 3
1727 A little sidestroke now and then for variety, but mostly crawl — why? 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1728 See, I told you not to drink this water. It makes you crazy. 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1729 I just realized, you can be of no help to me. 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1730 Did you bring a tide chart? 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1731 How's the fishing ? 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1732 It's my turn to row, damn it! 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1733 Yeah, dries out quick this time of year. 1.2500 0.04794 100 77 21 2
1734 You up for pulling a skier? 1.2500 0.05000 100 78 19 3
1735 Finding your contact seems like the least of our worries. 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1736 Did you happen to see a marching band come this way? 1.2500 0.05198 100 79 17 4
1737 You are ashore already Michael. 1.2500 0.05389 100 80 15 5
1738 At least you have two paddles. 1.2500 0.04794 100 77 21 2
1739 Hey, watch it pal, can't you see I'm crawlin' here! 1.2500 0.05198 100 79 17 4
1740 This just doesn't feel right.......I think that the coxswain is supposed to stay in the boat. 1.2500 0.05198 100 79 17 4
1741 What part of "No Wake Zone" don't you understand? 1.2500 0.04578 100 76 23 1
1742 Still believe global warming isn't real? 1.2475 0.05523 101 82 13 6
1743 No, you fool! I said, 'Get a water carafe,' not 'a watercraft.' 1.2475 0.05700 101 83 11 7
1744 How about a lift buddy? 1.2475 0.05341 101 81 15 5
1745 Pass on the right, @$$#*!! 1.2475 0.05341 101 81 15 5
1746 'Sand Ho! 1.2475 0.05152 101 80 17 4
1747 Race you!! 1.2475 0.05523 101 82 13 6
1748 I wish I was up a creek! 1.2475 0.05152 101 80 17 4
1749 I know a life preserver wouldn't do me any good, but you could have at least offered. 1.2475 0.04752 101 78 21 2
1750 I don't care what you think, Global Warming is still a hoax! 1.2475 0.05152 101 80 17 4
1751 This is MY hallucination! 1.2475 0.05341 101 81 15 5
1752 Haven't you heard of rideshare? 1.2475 0.05523 101 82 13 6
1753 Uber for Moses? 1.2475 0.05700 101 83 11 7
1754 Thanks for reducing your wake. 1.2475 0.04752 101 78 21 2
1755 Ok. Not a caption but suggestions for 2 cartoons, I cannot draw. First- Trump at desk piled high with money. "The buck stops here" sign on desk. Second- tourists in front of WH saying "it says it's available on air B&B". 1.2475 0.06037 101 85 7 9
1756 I think the artist forgot the water. 1.2475 0.05341 101 81 15 5
1757 Any update on climate change? 1.2475 0.05341 101 81 15 5
1758 What did you do with your life jacket?!? 1.2475 0.05523 101 82 13 6
1759 Fill my mouth with sand one more time and we're swapping places. 1.2475 0.04956 101 79 19 3
1760 No thanks, I'm terrified of drowning. 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1761 So you thought the sea would rise with global warming, eh? 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1762 You hit my sandcastle and didn't stop. 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1763 Each man to his own delusions! 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1764 First mate reporting for duty. 1.2424 0.04782 99 77 20 2
1765 If you MUST sing that song, can you skip the 'Life is but a dream' line? 1.2424 0.04561 99 76 22 1
1766 Why can't I row and you push? 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1767 Ahoy There my ass. 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1768 Can I get a lift to the next mirage? 1.2424 0.04782 99 77 20 2
1769 Oh, it's you, Mr. "women and children first!" 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1770 It's the other way to the ocean. 1.2424 0.05759 99 82 10 7
1771 What did I tell you about wearing your lifejacket? 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1772 Don't you just hate mixed metaphors? 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1773 What part of "gently down the stream" don't you understand? 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1774 Hey, get your own mirage! 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1775 You think you could talk to the Red Sea again? 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1776 For the last time, you come in after I sing "Gently down the stream"!! 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1777 So much for "Off-season rates - Sandy beach!" 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1778 Slow down. This stuff is not easy to swim in. 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1779 Michael, row the boat to a shore. 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1780 What do you mean I'm swimming in it? 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1781 "Hit me with that oar one more time and we're going to have a problem". 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1782 For God's sake man, don't leave me here to die! 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1783 It's a damn good thing we can't swim. 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1784 I specifically ordered an UberSUV! 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1785 I'd call you crazy if we weren't making the same amount of progress. 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1786 What do you mean "a rising tide lifts all boats"? 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1787 OK, you win. .. your mirage is better than mine. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1788 Apple Maps? 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1789 Next time I pick the route. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1790 I don't think the tide's coming in. 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1791 Watch where you're going! 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1792 That 'merrily' word. I don't think it means what you think it means. 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1793 So, my part comes in at "Gently Down the Stream?" 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1794 I told you high tide's not for another few hours 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1795 Dammit Joe, I said I'm sorry! 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1796 Do you want to rent the boat for another hour? 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1797 No oars in the bike lane, dude! 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1798 Permission to board, captain? 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1799 I asked God to send help but this is the wrong joke. 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1800 The imagination is admirable - it's the pretension I can't stand 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1801 Would you mind rowing in a straighter line. I'm trying to draft off your wake. 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1802 No. The sand isn't starting to feel wetter. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1803 'I'll pass on the ride, but thanks for the offer. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1804 Let me onboard! I'm drowning here! 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1805 See, I told you I'd still get seasick. 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1806 It was my turn to row two mirages ago. 1.2424 0.04782 99 77 20 2
1807 Well this fits right in with the melting clocks. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1808 So, what did you really wish for? 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1809 What happens on the boat, stays on the boat 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1810 Now do you realize why throwing me overboard was a futile punishment? 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1811 He also drained Lake Erie. 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1812 I told you I could find the drain!! 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1813 Why don't you watch where you're going? 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1814 So much for 'life is but a dream!' 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1815 Damn it man, I'm trying to take a drink here. 1.2424 0.05759 99 82 10 7
1816 For Pete's sake, if you sing "merrily, merrily, merrily" one more time ... 1.2424 0.04561 99 76 22 1
1817 Here, I am trying to find my contact and you just go rowing right over it! 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1818 What part of "no wake" don't you understand? 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1819 Fine! Alex Trebeck really does know every answer. Now can I get back in? 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1820 Could you please stop rowing sand in my face! 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1821 If you sing "life is but a dream" one more time... 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1822 Take the shortcut, you said! 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1823 "I said, 'Let's find Moby, not the Gobi.' 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1824 Yeah, rowing is good but I find that I get better results with yoga. 1.2424 0.04782 99 77 20 2
1825 The next time you sign up for a river cruise, check the long range forecast. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1826 Hey!...How about "On your left!"? 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1827 Tomorrow, I row and you be on pearl duty! 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1828 You're the dumbest mirage I've ever seen! 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1829 Permission to come aboard Cap'n, I'm sick of swimming. 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1830 Keep rowing I can see land! 1.2424 0.05759 99 82 10 7
1831 It's my turn to row and your turn to ski. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1832 Something tells me you're not real. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1833 Captain? I thought you were supposed to go down with the ship. 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1834 I don't think you've grasped our dilemma. 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1835 Enough. already, with the "Michael Row Your Boat Ashore." 1.2424 0.05759 99 82 10 7
1836 How soon did you say the deluge was coming? 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1837 Michael, how many times do I have to tell you? It's just a song. 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1838 We need wine, women, and directions. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1839 Are you gonna toss me a life jacket or not?!! 1.2424 0.04782 99 77 20 2
1840 Okay, you win. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1841 Michael, why are you rowing the boat ashore? 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1842 There's a twenty-minute rule on the rowing machine. 1.2424 0.04782 99 77 20 2
1843 Thanks for the offer, but I get terribly sandsick. 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1844 There is no high tide! 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1845 I'm sorry. I was hoping for a ride that goes further than that. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1846 Row row row your boat, roughly through the sand, terribly terribly terribly terribly, you are on dry land. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1847 Aren't you a sight for sore thighs! 1.2424 0.05195 99 79 16 4
1848 Who says you can't get up shit creek without a paddle? 1.2424 0.05759 99 82 10 7
1849 Hey, you're in my lane. 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1850 Don't just sit there! Toss me a life jacket! 1.2424 0.04782 99 77 20 2
1851 Michael, stop rowing. You're ashore. Hallelujah! 1.2424 0.05759 99 82 10 7
1852 Dammit Ed, is it my turn to use the boat! 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1853 I'm tired of being the friendly dolphin -- let's switch! 1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1854 You knocked me off my paddleboard, man! 1.2424 0.05759 99 82 10 7
1855 'Life is but a dream' . . . my ass! 1.2400 0.05341 100 81 14 5
1856 Are you an allusion or a delusion? 1.2400 0.04740 100 78 20 2
1857 Right, no leak! Now can I get back in the boat? 1.2400 0.05341 100 81 14 5
1858 You're right - I can touch 1.2400 0.05527 100 82 12 6
1859 Are we there yet? 1.2400 0.05148 100 80 16 4
1860 Didn't the race end when we hit the beach? 1.2400 0.05341 100 81 14 5
1861 You call that a stroke? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1862 Thanks, but I'm only crawling as far as the next dune. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1863 This is not an either oar choice. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1864 You do know that a tsunami is coming! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1865 What part of "gently down the stream" do you not get? 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1866 Don't tell me you forgot the frigging life vests? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1867 How did you get over the wall? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1868 Waiting for high tide? 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1869 Slow down! You trying to drown me in your wake? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1870 Would you mind getting out of my mirage? 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1871 Your optimism is killing me! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1872 I thought the seas were rising. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1873 Did you happen across a Fitbit? 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1874 'I'm warning you, one more verse of, ''Row, row, row your boat,'' and things could get ugly.' 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1875 Give up the "merrily" already -- there's no stream! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1876 I'm starting to think that "ship of the desert" may have been a metaphor for something. 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1877 You are welcome to climb aboard as long as you don't bring up climate change. 1.2371 0.05820 97 81 9 7
1878 I'm sure you're a mirage But you're an absolutely useless one 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1879 How much longer till we switch places? 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1880 It's not quite the miracle you seem to think it is. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1881 Hey! Watch where you're going! 1.2371 0.05820 97 81 9 7
1882 I guess we're on an equal footing: You forgot the map, I lost my glasses. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1883 I'm thinking there must be a small island with a single palm tree nearby. 1.2371 0.05820 97 81 9 7
1884 Either I'm Jesus or you're an idiot. 1.2371 0.05820 97 81 9 7
1885 You rowed into the wrong cliche. 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1886 On the bright side, my personal trainer said that this is a much better workout. 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1887 I could do with a dry scotch. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1888 Michael. You've rowed your boat ashore and then some. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1889 Enough already, Michael. 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1890 Make this river great again! 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1891 I wish you wouldn't yell "Ahoy" to every cactus. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1892 Your wake is making this harder for me! 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1893 Now do you believe in climate change? 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1894 So this is what global warming has come to. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1895 For Christ's sake, will you slow down? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1896 I'm calling Uber next time. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1897 Why am I always the last to know? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1898 Life is not but a dream, ok?! 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1899 I heard there is a speed trap up ahead 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1900 If you let me in I'll help you raise the sail. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1901 I'll board as soon as my luggage arrives. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1902 Michael stopped when he got the boat ashore, Gerald. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1903 Can we go back to being adrift? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1904 It's all a hoax. Just keep rowing. 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1905 That's a tough row to row. 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1906 I think you can stop rowing now, Michael. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1907 The real problem with Trickle Down Economics is that some of us don't have a boat, you see... 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1908 Deserter! 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1909 You swim. My turn to row. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1910 I capsized a few miles back! I appreciate the offer but I'm not going through that again. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1911 Enough already, Michael, row your boat back to the water. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1912 For the last time, keep your back straight and drive with your legs! 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1913 It's my turn to row! 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1914 Did NASA mention how we are supposed to get home? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1915 Still in Da Nile? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1916 Your call means a great deal to us .... 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1917 If you say, "Well this is no pleasure cruise" one more time, so help me... 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1918 So, you still think climate change is nonsense? 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1919 Ironic, seems you're down a river with paddles. 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1920 The next time the robocaller gets you to stay on the line to win the free cruise, go ahead and buy the upgrade package OK? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1921 'Row, row, row your boat' - is that the only song you know? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1922 Hey, buster! Stay in your lane! 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1923 How can you see where you're going? 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1924 Don't jinx it, at least it's a dry heat. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1925 Hey, watch those oars! I'm swimming over here! 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1926 I would have appreciated a shout out saying you were going to pass. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1927 Can't you stop long enough to save a drowning man? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1928 Dude, I don't CARE that you rowed stroke at Princeton. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1929 So YOU'RE the oars with no name! 1.2371 0.06002 97 82 7 8
1930 Don't desert me, son. 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1931 Excuse me, do you have any water? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1932 Get out of the way. I'm in a hurry! 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1933 Michael, you idiot, must you keep rowing your boat ashore?! 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1934 You're doing it wrong. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1935 I don't know where you're going, but is there room for two? 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1936 You're doing it wrong. 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1937 If that sand goes in my face you'd better hope you're a mirage! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1938 The boss says you need to turn on your vacation alert. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1939 I see you still think global warming is a hoax. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1940 "Can I bum a ride?' 1.2371 0.06002 97 82 7 8
1941 For God's sake, throw me a life preserver." 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1942 Time to switch. You swim, I'll row." 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1943 The fishing here is terrible. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1944 You keep rowing, merrily, merrily, merrily, and I keep telling you, it's but a dream! 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1945 Of course there's room! 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1946 Don't just sit there, throw me a life preserver. 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1947 Can't you see I've lost my contact lens?! 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1948 Lost?! Of course you're lost, you idiot! 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1949 Apparently, you misunderstood Hemingway's book.... 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1950 Fred, you don't have to yell 'stroke' 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1951 Hey, how often do you get to pose for a Dali painting? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1952 How come YOU get to sit in the boat? 1.2371 0.04341 97 74 23 0
1953 If you build it, it still won't rain. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1954 Now, you think we should have asked for directions!! 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1955 $25 for a lift?! Thanks, I'll crawl. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1956 'One of the two of us is seeing things.' 1.2371 0.04582 97 75 21 1
1957 I told you we were beached way back there. 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1958 Yes, Michael, that's far enough. 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1959 I lost my contact lens. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1960 What do you mean 'Sorry, this is the express'? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1961 I had requested a camel from Uber 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1962 Is that an off road vehicle? 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1963 Your mother told you never to pick up strangers? 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1964 Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, not! 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1965 "Hey, can I get in the boat?" "No way, it's only built for one." Ella is 7, we know that is too young, but she REALLY wanted me to send her caption in. Thank you. 1.2371 0.05820 97 81 9 7
1966 Just slow down and let me in! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1967 This is my last die-athalon. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1968 Are you a mirage? Or am I? 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1969 I'm already through anger and at acceptance. Will you please get past the denial phase? 1.2371 0.04810 97 76 19 2
1970 'Easy for you to say. You've got a boat and oars!" 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1971 No, I'm not thankful that at least it's a dry heat. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1972 You took forever. I am cancelling my Amazon prime membership! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1973 We have already passed the oasis. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1974 You're getting us nowhere! Let me row for awhile. 1.2371 0.04582 97 75 21 1
1975 No, it's not any cooler here in the water. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1976 Don't worry, I've been assured Global Warming is a hoax. Keep rowing. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1977 Is it just me or do we not have both oars in the water? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1978 The boat's bad enough, but do you have to sing sea shanties too? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1979 I told you, we can switch at the next mirage. 1.2371 0.04582 97 75 21 1
1980 Do you ever get the feeling that this is all but a dream? 1.2371 0.04582 97 75 21 1
1981 Faster! We're missing Burning Man! 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1982 I was right in more than just one way to say you don't have both your oars in the water. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1983 Michael? We reached the shore quite a few miles back. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1984 I'll race you to the mirage! 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1985 Your form is all wrong. 1.2371 0.04582 97 75 21 1
1986 Watch your wake 1.2371 0.04582 97 75 21 1
1987 You're in the wrong story! 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1988 And here I was, up the creek without a paddle! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1989 No, it does NOT 'feel good to be on terra firma.' 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1990 You said I could row after that last wave. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1991 I would, but I don't want to get sand in the boat. 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1992 Your optimism is annoying me, Bill. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1993 For improved results you should probably try using something called water 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1994 No, Noah. The flood was last time. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1995 You misinterpreted what I meant by 'don't reinvent the wheel'. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
1996 No Wake Zone, jerk! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
1997 Damn it, Oscar, you know I can't swim! 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1998 I don't care any more if you get sand in your shoes. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1999 Can I hitch a ride to the mirage? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
2000 No Michael! I meant 'row the boat TO the shore'. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
2001 That's the NEXT stage of the triathlon. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
2002 This is the worst gym I've ever been to! 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
2003 It's red right returning, you idiot! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
2004 Quit splashing me! 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
2005 Your navigational skills suck! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
2006 All I can say is, if you hit a squall, don't come asking for help! 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
2007 Do I look like I'm overboard ? 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
2008 If you let me in, I'll tell you where the good fishing is. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
2009 Without my help, you'll never make it before the tide goes out! 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
2010 One more verse of "Row, Row, Row your boat" and I will drown you! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
2011 Thanks for the offer but I think that I'll wait for something with wheels." 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
2012 For the last time, you are going the wrong way! 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
2013 I refuse to be a pawn in your mirage. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
2014 Try crawling a mile in my shoes. 1.2371 0.04582 97 75 21 1
2015 No wake! 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
2016 You're gonna need a bigger boat. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
2017 I’m not getting back in until I find my lucky penny. 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
2018 That's carrying a mirage a little to far, Elliott! 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
2019 Help! I'm drowning. 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
2020 Did we forget anything? 1.2371 0.05238 97 78 15 4
2021 How much further do you expect me to swim? 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
2022 Have some compassion, man! Let me on board. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
2023 Merge already! 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
2024 Noah's Ark 2.0 - Global Warming Edition 1.2371 0.05633 97 80 11 6
2025 OK, but I get to sing the "Merrily, Merrily" part this time 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
2026 If you get to the mirage before me, save me a drink. 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
2027 I forgot my life jacket. 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
2028 For the last time--your strokes really need to be more fluid! 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
2029 I'm tired of walking. Let me row for a while. 1.2347 0.04983 98 78 17 3
2030 Come on in, the water's fine. 1.2347 0.04983 98 78 17 3
2031 Slow it down, buddy! This is a no-wake zone! 1.2347 0.04767 98 77 19 2
2032 Hey, shouldn't you be wearing a life jacket? 1.2347 0.04983 98 78 17 3
2033 How about getting out and letting me row for a while. 1.2347 0.04767 98 77 19 2
2034 Your sense of irony is killing me! 1.2347 0.05190 98 79 15 4
2035 If you feather your oars, you'll go a bit faster, mate. 1.2347 0.05389 98 80 13 5
2036 Which confused you more, "down the stream," or "gently?" 1.2347 0.05389 98 80 13 5
2037 That was a vulture which led you here, not an albatross. 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2038 Would you at least stop singing that blasted song?! 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2039 It took 4 years, but I told you he would "drain the swamp." 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2040 Hey, I think I found dry land. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2041 Why aren't you wearing life jacket?!! 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2042 We'll never be rescued in this drought! 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
2043 We've gone this far and now you're going to let me drown? 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2044 Get out of the boat. It's your turn to crawl. 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
2045 Long time, no sea. I thought the boat was rigged! 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2046 I'll NEVER find my contact now! 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2047 So, you're still certain that climate change is nonsense? 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2048 It's "...gently down the STREAM..."! 1.2292 0.05635 96 80 10 6
2049 For crying out loud, can't you ever stop being such an optimist? 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2050 Get out! It's my turn to row! 1.2292 0.04559 96 75 20 1
2051 Hallelujah, Michael! 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2052 Hey, it's my turn to row and you to swim. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2053 If you think you've got it bad, you should have seen the creek I was up last week. Without a paddle. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2054 Did you have to be so literal, Michael? 1.2292 0.06012 96 82 6 8
2055 All I'm saying is, absent the smell, the other creek wasn't so bad. 1.2292 0.05635 96 80 10 6
2056 Would you consider rowing for Uber? 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2057 What did you do, take the scenic route? 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2058 Maybe you're overthinking this. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2059 At least throw me a lifeline. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2060 Lazy. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2061 We escape from one cartoon cliche, only end up in another! 1.2292 0.04312 96 74 22 0
2062 Let's change places. I row and you swim. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2063 Hey! Stay out of my genre! 1.2292 0.05635 96 80 10 6
2064 You obviously don’t fully understand the concept of irony. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2065 I was scuba diving but the visibility is poor. 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2066 It's my turn to row the boat. 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
2067 I requested an Uber "Premium". What is the meaning of this? 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2068 Let's switch places at the next oasis 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2069 Sir, there you are. You forgot to sign your boat rental waiver 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2070 I guess insufferable low-flush toilets weren't the answer after all. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2071 OK, I promise to not say 'Land ahead Captian' again, just let me back in. 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
2072 Guess you did need a coxswain, huh? 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2073 You forgot the women and children 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2074 Hey! I just finished smoothing out this desert! 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2075 Ever since we reached land, I've wondered why you don't get out of the boat. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2076 You're being way too optimistic about this oasis. 1.2292 0.04559 96 75 20 1
2077 I'd seen a flash flood, but I've never even heard of a flash drought. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2078 Michael, you didn't have to take me literally. 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2079 Remind me again why you turned down the car? 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2080 Damn climate denier! 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2081 Hey pal, your messing with my mirage. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2082 Race you to the oasis! 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2083 Turn left at the next instersection. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2084 Showoff! 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2085 Cairo; yeah, I get it. Still not funny. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2086 I thought it was 'gently down a stream?' 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2087 Hey, man. Where's the fire? 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2088 Worst Vegas trip ever. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2089 I don't care is your name is Ishmael, you are lost. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2090 Can't a brother bum a ride to the next mirage? 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2091 Stop! Can't you see I'm drowning here? 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
2092 I walk only on water. 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2093 Worst mirage ever. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2094 Watch where you're going! 1.2292 0.05635 96 80 10 6
2095 Michael, is that you? 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2096 One of us is experiencing a mirage. 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2097 you're rowing too fast! 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2098 Front crawl and rowing are more challenging since the drought! 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2099 Where can I rent one of those? 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2100 You idiot! You're supposed to part the sea when you don't have a boat. 1.2292 0.05635 96 80 10 6
2101 Now you're just being a jerk! 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2102 Do you mind? 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2103 You're supposed to be following, not racing ahead and splashing me all the time! 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2104 "Can I bum a ride?' 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2105 You were always the dreamer. I am much more down to earth. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2106 Wanna race to the mirage? 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2107 This ain't no merrily merrily dream, and that ain't no stream. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2108 Find your own water, buddy. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2109 Well, at this point, I'd have to say the high water is not the obstacle. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2110 How's that mirage working out for you? 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2111 Come on in, the water is great! 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
2112 I'm usually not one to desert a sinking ship. 1.2268 0.05386 97 80 12 5
2113 Can you throw me a life preserver? 1.2268 0.04750 97 77 18 2
2114 Who do you think you're calling a mirage? 1.2268 0.04518 97 76 20 1
2115 For the last time, I am not racing you to any cactus. 1.2268 0.04750 97 77 18 2
2116 Hey, Jake, I'm beginning to think this lake is a mirage. 1.2268 0.04750 97 77 18 2
2117 I hope there is a rest room at the oasis. 1.2268 0.05582 97 81 10 6
2118 No, I DON'T need a fitness coach! 1.2268 0.05182 97 79 14 4
2119 They haven't updated the directions since Moses came through here! 1.2268 0.04750 97 77 18 2
2120 No, I don't want you to teach me how to fish! 1.2268 0.04971 97 78 16 3
2121 How about a ride to the next port? 1.2268 0.04274 97 75 22 0
2122 Row faster! I think I see land! 1.2268 0.04971 97 78 16 3
2123 Thanks a lot. Your mirage just hit me in the head with an oar. 1.2268 0.05582 97 81 10 6
2124 I ordered pastrami and got tsunami. 1.2268 0.05582 97 81 10 6
2125 I know what the song says Michael, but enough is enough. 1.2268 0.05386 97 80 12 5
2126 Four 'merrilys,' dammit! 1.2268 0.05182 97 79 14 4
2127 Hey Magellan, watch where you're rowing! 1.2268 0.04971 97 78 16 3
2128 This is the only Uber in all of Coachella? 1.2268 0.05182 97 79 14 4
2129 Can I hitch a ride to shore? 1.2268 0.05386 97 80 12 5
2130 Imagine how hard it would be if you weren't in a mirage! 1.2268 0.04750 97 77 18 2
2131 I'll give you this, George, you're an optimist. 1.2268 0.04750 97 77 18 2
2132 So, how much dryland coaching have you done? 1.2268 0.05386 97 80 12 5
2133 Well then, can I have a ride to the dry dock? 1.2268 0.04518 97 76 20 1
2134 No life jacket? No thanks. 1.2268 0.04971 97 78 16 3
2135 I miss saying, "moist." 1.2268 0.05182 97 79 14 4
2136 When will it be my turn to row the boat, Greg? 1.2268 0.05386 97 80 12 5
2137 I told you we should have made a left at that last mirage! 1.2268 0.05182 97 79 14 4
2138 It's a race to the death 1.2268 0.04971 97 78 16 3
2139 I tried to tell you. 1.2268 0.05182 97 79 14 4
2140 May I borrow that? 1.2245 0.04925 98 79 16 3
2141 Let me guess, your name is Michael, and you take the lyrics to folk songs entirely literally. 1.2245 0.05335 98 81 12 5
2142 It's the journey, not the destination. 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
2143 Did you think of trying a power sander? 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2144 I'm looking for Wilson. Have you seen him? 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2145 It's not fair. You always get the chance to row. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2146 How much longer til we reach the mirage? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2147 Are you sure this is Crossfit? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2148 Get off my desert! 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2149 I think we're both hallucinating. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2150 You headed for Palm Springs by any chance? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2151 Won't you stop and help your fellow man when he's drowning in irony!?! 1.2234 0.05691 94 79 9 6
2152 What do you mean your GPS said this way would be quicker? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2153 I'm drowning here! 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2154 OK, you're right. Same bet, no handicap? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2155 I said, it's my turn to row! 1.2234 0.04576 94 74 19 1
2156 I still maintain that global warming is a myth cooked up by the Chinese and I'll swim this damn English Channel even if it's the last thing I do! 1.2234 0.05691 94 79 9 6
2157 If you keep flicking sand in my face, I won't sing the rowing song! 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2158 Is the concept of water so difficult? 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2159 Can you throw me a life preserver? 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
2160 "Nah, I don't need Waze," you said. "I know exactly where I'm going," you said. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2161 You're obviously still mad about our last row. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2162 Hey, hey! I'm drowning here. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2163 If you let me back in, I promise not to sing any more 'Row, row your boat.' 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2164 Let's call it a draw 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2165 Are you certain Siri said to take a left back in Brooklyn? 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2166 The concept 'desert island' is indeed confusing. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2167 Did you call for an Uber? 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2168 Wanna race? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2169 Please let me come aboard. I can help if you start taking on sand. 1.2234 0.04576 94 74 19 1
2170 This is a sad excuse for a shortcut! 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2171 If I hear one more round of "Row, Row, Your Boat", I'm going to slap you silly. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2172 Request permission to come aboard, bastard. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2173 Rowing is nice, but I prefer hot yoga. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2174 So, you think you can walk on water... 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2175 Are you trying to make me look bad? 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
2176 Got any gum? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2177 Yes I know the way to dry land! 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
2178 Wow, that global warming turned out to be a lot worse than they said it would be. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2179 Get real. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2180 I'm distorting 'your' hallucination of reality? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2181 Harold, it was my turn a mile back! 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2182 Global warming has screwed us both. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2183 Oh no, you've sprung a leak . 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2184 Did you remember to lock the front door. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2185 Mum sent you, didn't she! Well, tell her I'm not going back with you or anyone! 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2186 And here I believed climate change was a hoax. 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
2187 Merrily Merrily Merrily Merrily life is but a dream 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2188 From now on I'm not pushing you up the hills. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2189 Watch the oars, buddy. You almost got sand in my eyes. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2190 Michael, it's just a song; it wasn't a request. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2191 Since climate change, is this the Atlantic or the Pacific? 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2192 Take your damn "merrily, merrily, merrily" somewhere else. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2193 I said camel, not canoe! 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2194 I yelled "man overboard." What's your problem? 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2195 Trust me Columbus, you found land 5 hours ago. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2196 My boat capsized. Can I hitch a ride with you? 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2197 Look, I'm not going to pretend to swim so we can both "feel better" about this! 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2198 A triathlon usually involves water. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2199 Why didn't we just stay on the Arc? 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2200 If I promise to help bail, will you let me in? 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2201 Is that the surge price or standard fare? 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2202 ...Merrilly, merrily, merrily, merrilly - just doesn't cut it for me anymore. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2203 Hey, can't you see I'm crawling, here? 1.2234 0.05691 94 79 9 6
2204 Stroke! 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2205 Watch out! You're making waves! 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2206 You went in a circle again?! 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2207 Do you have any water? 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
2208 Luckily I don't believe in climate change. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2209 Is the Styx always so low this time of year Charon? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2210 Still no sign of water? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2211 'I think I'll skip my turn." 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2212 I said we are in the same boat! I did not mean get one! 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2213 Michael, DON'T row the boat ashore. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2214 If you're not from Guinness World Records, get the hell off my casserole! 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2215 for the 100th time, it is just a mirage- Now let's cut our losses and leave the boat behind! 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2216 Well, I don't think you're making any better time than I am in that thing. 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
2217 You must be imagining things. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2218 When's it gonna be my turn to row? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2219 So that darned Moses has been through here? 1.2234 0.05691 94 79 9 6
2220 Hey, not fair, where can I get one of those? 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
2221 Per chance are you going my way? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2222 Keep going - you're making good time. But stop splashing sand in my face! 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2223 The sea level will be rising any minute now! 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2224 You said we were going to be heroes Noah 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2225 Canada or Mexico? 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2226 If you sing "Row your boat" one more time I will gently put that oar ... 1.2234 0.05691 94 79 9 6
2227 I told you, you couldn’t escape climate change. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2228 I still say there is no such thing as global warming! 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2229 Is that you George or am I hallucinating? 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2230 I lost my fins. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2231 This was easier before global warming. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2232 Oh good, I was hoping this was surreal experience. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2233 We are on land. Just call it right or left. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2234 I thought I was the greatest fool in the world, but then of course, I saw an oar out of the corner of my eye. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2235 Which one of us is the mirage. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2236 I guess pleading for water at this point might seem superfluous. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2237 Oh sure. Make me do all the crawling. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2238 You're the third person that's told me I was *their* mirage. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2239 Seventy percent of the earth's surface is covered with water. What, exactly, did you type into the Sat Nav this time? 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2240 I never realized I was such a good swimmer. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2241 Next time, just bring the camel. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2242 Aw, come on, I can't swim. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2243 Do you see land? 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2244 Row, Row, Row your Boat is no longer on my Playlist. 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
2245 Whadaya mean, you don't have a life preserver? 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2246 For Pete's sake, would you slow down and let me in! 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2247 You've overachieved again, Michael. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2248 I told you we should have stayed in the water. 1.2211 0.05433 95 79 11 5
2249 Have you no honor, man! It's women and children first. 1.2211 0.04775 95 76 17 2
2250 You're just going to leave me to the sand sharks? 1.2211 0.05004 95 77 15 3
2251 You see it too? 1.2211 0.04534 95 75 19 1
2252 Maybe we should have gone to starboard back there. 1.2211 0.05433 95 79 11 5
2253 Noah....listen, you're never going to need that boat. 1.2211 0.05004 95 77 15 3
2254 when is this fucking acid going to wear off? 1.2211 0.05635 95 80 9 6
2255 By Jove, I'll see thee hang for this ye mutinous swine! 1.2211 0.05004 95 77 15 3
2256 Merrily Merrily Merrily Merrily life is but a dream 1.2211 0.05223 95 78 13 4
2257 For the hundredth time, I don't see an oasis. 1.2211 0.05004 95 77 15 3
2258 Could you toss me a life jacket? 1.2211 0.05004 95 77 15 3
2259 And where do you think you're going without me? 1.2211 0.05433 95 79 11 5
2260 If you sing "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" one more time, I'll... 1.2211 0.05004 95 77 15 3
2261 I feel like this marathon training gets more intense every year. 1.2211 0.04775 95 76 17 2
2262 Got room for one more? 1.2211 0.05223 95 78 13 4
2263 No, the 'rowboat of the desert' is not actually a smaller 'ship of the desert'. 1.2211 0.05433 95 79 11 5
2264 And I thought I needed water! 1.2211 0.05004 95 77 15 3
2265 Which App are you using? 1.2211 0.04534 95 75 19 1
2266 Stop being selfish! It's my turn to row. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2267 Get that surprised look off your face - you know it's my turn to row 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2268 Can you spare any of your inaginary water? 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2269 What, no life preserver? 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2270 I just can't do another sea shanty, Fred 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2271 Hey, buddy! I have the right-of-way! 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2272 Don't you know that you're rowing upstream? 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2273 For the last time, it's just a mirage! 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2274 Stroke...stroke...I'm havin' a HEAT stroke! 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2275 You said we would take turns sitting in the boat?! 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2276 He was really serious about draining. 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2277 Hold on for a minute. My contacts lense is down here somewhere. 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2278 This Guinness Record thing has gone far enough! 1.2151 0.05690 93 79 8 6
2279 One of us is seeing a mirage and I don't think it's me. 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2280 Do you know the way to San Jose? 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2281 Will you quit throwing sand in my face! 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2282 If you're looking for the beach, just follow me. 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2283 I'm crawling as slowly as I can. If you can't keep up, row faster. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2284 Excuse me, but either I'm in your hallucination, or you're in mine. Any preference? 1.2151 0.04548 93 74 18 1
2285 See? I told you there were no sand sharks! 1.2151 0.04284 93 73 20 0
2286 Watch out! Danger ahead. Icebergs. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2287 Undrain the swamp. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2288 Unfortunately it gets tougher to row during low tide. 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2289 I was right, it's been sand the whole time. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2290 You got room for two? 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2291 Why is it always your turn to row when we're going downhill? 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2292 Get out and help me find my contact lens, or I'll show you what paddling means! 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2293 It's time to stop rowing your boat ashore, Michael! 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2294 Water, we need water. 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2295 We need to change the last verse to...Life is but a Nightmare! 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2296 Disappointing mirage, eh? 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2297 So how long have you been driving with Uber? 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2298 Is this my mirage or yours? 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2299 I'm making just as good progress swimming. 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2300 No, I don't have exact change !!! 1.2151 0.05690 93 79 8 6
2301 Next time, pray less allegorically. 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2302 No no, I don't know the words to row row row your boat. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2303 This is the last time I pick a global warming denier as a swimming coach! 1.2151 0.05690 93 79 8 6
2304 No thanks. I'll just wait for my Uber. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2305 There used to be a lake here. 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2306 Go back. It's a mirage. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2307 Caught any fish lately? 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2308 You have to admit my mirages are getting very creative. 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2309 Keep your eye out for sand sharks! 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2310 So what now Mister 'I'm-positive-it's-not-too-shallow.'? 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2311 I thought you said global warming was a myth 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2312 Seriously? Better safe than sorry?! 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2313 My turn! 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2314 This is not a "sea of troubles," and you're not Hamlet. 1.2151 0.04548 93 74 18 1
2315 Ok, I'm impressed, but did you bring water? 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2316 Tim, we're going the same speed. Get out of the damn boat. 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2317 Thank you,no! I would NOT like a life preserver! 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2318 That's NOT why we want water! 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2319 That was my contact lens thank you very much. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2320 Sorry for the wait. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2321 Your telling me you got the boat using points? And no blackout dates? 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2322 Any water on board? 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2323 Put your back into it! 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2324 Hey! Are you a mirage or just a moron? 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2325 So THAT'S why it took Moses forty years... 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2326 If I hear "Row,row,row your boat" one more time.... 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2327 So was it a mirage, or not? 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2328 This is a no wake desert 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2329 You know its a mirage, right? 1.2151 0.05690 93 79 8 6
2330 Oh great, you remembered to bring a boat - but not the water! 1.2151 0.05690 93 79 8 6
2331 Good News! We're the finalists in the climate skeptics games. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2332 If you're not a mirage, say something 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2333 You make a lousy mirage! 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2334 So who's for lunch? 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2335 I'd rather crawl than hear you sing "Row, row, row your boat" again... 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2336 No, I said let's get some dinner and dessert! 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2337 It's Michel row the boat ashore...not on shore. 1.2151 0.05481 93 78 10 5
2338 Because my shoes aren't non-marking? Are you serious!? 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2339 I can't row you fool! You know I'm prone to seasickness. 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2340 I'm afraid that the desalinization project has gone too far. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2341 What if someone sees me in that. I'd rather crawl around aimlessly. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2342 Is this your dream or mine? 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2343 I cant even construct a decent mirage. 1.2088 0.04560 91 73 17 1
2344 Need a coxswain? 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2345 Don't expect me to sing hallelujah, Michael. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2346 Looking backward is not the solution. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2347 is there room for one more 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2348 I can't take it anymore, stop shouting Land Ho !" 1.2088 0.05529 91 77 9 5
2349 I told you sand sharks live in the ocean! 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2350 Pretty good, but crawling builds your lower body, too. 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2351 Stop singing that song!!! 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2352 Don't worry about hopping in, this boat is unsinkable. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2353 What I wouldn't give for a Pumpkin Spice latte. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2354 That's quite a mirage you've got there. 1.2088 0.04560 91 73 17 1
2355 If you are not a mirage, toss me a line. 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2356 ... but it's still walk & row, to me. 1.2088 0.06156 91 80 3 8
2357 You idiot! It's "Life is but a dream," not "And I love ice cream" 1.2088 0.05529 91 77 9 5
2358 Slow down! No wake area! 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2359 Watch out for turtle nests. 1.2088 0.05529 91 77 9 5
2360 Can I have a lift to the oasis? 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2361 I think we're going the wrong way. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2362 I could have sworn I ice fished here a year ago. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2363 "Where'd you rent that? 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2364 I think we drank too much. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2365 Someday your boat will come in. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2366 At least throw me a life saver for the mirage! 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2367 I'm not going to save you if you capsize! 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2368 I can't believe it, another dry county! 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2369 Don't be mad. I swear I looked for you. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2370 You really can't get there from here. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2371 Your glass-half-full mantra is really ticking me off. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2372 Sir, I feel like I'm drowning. 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2373 OK... this isn't funny anymore. It's MY turn. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2374 I bet there's no mirage up ahead either. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2375 Could you stop long enough so as l can get aboard? 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2376 It wasn't a spider, Stan. Please get back in the boat, we're running late. 1.2088 0.05745 91 78 7 6
2377 What do you mean when is the next high tide? This is the high tide! 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2378 It's my turn in the boat. 1.2088 0.05529 91 77 9 5
2379 This boat will sink if I let you climb into it. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2380 What makes you think the water level isn't rising? 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2381 Do you know the score in the Manchester United - Liverpool game? 1.2088 0.05529 91 77 9 5
2382 I'll row--you rest for a while 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2383 The least you can do is throw me a life jacket. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2384 Have you seen MY boat? 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2385 Hey! Some of us prefer dying in the desert the old fashioned way! 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2386 Toss me a line! 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2387 Fine! Rowing is marginally faster than crawling, I still think we should walk. 1.2088 0.05529 91 77 9 5
2388 Ahoy Matey, Have room for one more? 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2389 I thought it said this way for dessert. 1.2088 0.05529 91 77 9 5
2390 Trust me, it's going to be bigger than spin classes. 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2391 Face facts. It was a mirage! 1.2088 0.05745 91 78 7 6
2392 Some people have all the luck! 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2393 This is the last time I order UberX. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2394 The salesman said this is the ship of the desert? The camel, Eric, the camel! 1.2088 0.05529 91 77 9 5
2395 "Google Maps," he insisted! 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2396 Next time, I'm flying direct. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2397 Did they also tell you to never give up on your dreams? 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2398 The ark is supposed to be big enough for two of each kind! 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2399 Can’t believe this will be an Olympic event in 2020. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2400 Climate change is near. 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2401 Hey, smart guy, your right turn signal's on! 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2402 ...and this is a no-wake zone! 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2403 You're in the wrong cliche, buddy. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2404 Sand shark! 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2405 We were promised that he'd make America Great again! Now look at us! 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2406 FedEx or Uber? 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2407 Michael, just stop it. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2408 Have you read his latest tweet about global warming? 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2409 Have you seen my paddleboard? 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2410 Coach... is this really the way you trained Michael Phelps! 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2411 If only I had your mirage... 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2412 One of us is halucinating, but which one? 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2413 If I knew you had a boat I'd have invited friends. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2414 '...gently down the stream.' Now it's my turn. 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2415 And this time no jumping the gun. Ready? On your mark... 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2416 Michael, he was being sarcastic when he told you to row your boat ashore. Hallelujah. 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2417 You wouldn't happen to be going to Barstow? 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2418 This sunny optimism of yours is really getting on my nerves. 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2419 You've landed in a dry county. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2420 I think you're in the wrong row. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2421 Is that you, Michael, rowing the boat ashore? 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2422 Seriously? 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2423 I'm afraid it may be the wave of the future. 1.2065 0.05687 92 79 7 6
2424 It's your turn to push. 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2425 Hallucinate a boat for me too please. 1.2065 0.05473 92 78 9 5
2426 I don't care if we 're living in a post-facts society, it's not going to work. 1.2065 0.05687 92 79 7 6
2427 Slow Down! I can't keep up! 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2428 Jesus walked on water, but you can row on land? 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2429 You can create your own reality but you still can't drink the water. 1.2065 0.05687 92 79 7 6
2430 I guess you don't believe in climate change? 1.2065 0.05473 92 78 9 5
2431 How long did it take you to get here? 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2432 If this is the ocean, I'm Jesus. 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2433 Do you really want to know if I packed our toothbrushes? 1.2065 0.04516 92 74 17 1
2434 Going my way? 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2435 Global *gasp* warming *gasp* is *gasp* a hoax *gasp* 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2436 I'm tired of dog-paddling, can I get in the boat? 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2437 Can I catch a ride ? 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2438 I know, right? What a weird place to lose a contact. 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2439 Don't worry about me, pal--a rising tide lifts all boats! 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2440 If you say something, see something. 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2441 When's it my turn to row?!! 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2442 Do you have any water? 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2443 Please! I'm drowning in self pity. 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2444 a mirage is no reason for optimism. 1.2065 0.05473 92 78 9 5
2445 Your part of the mirage aren't you? 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2446 OF COURSE I`M DROWNING ! 1.2065 0.05473 92 78 9 5
2447 Really? You come in after '...gently down the stream'! 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2448 I think its all a conspiracy of those climate change believers. 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2449 ' come on, now you be the wind.' 1.2065 0.05473 92 78 9 5
2450 Water, water anywhere?! 1.2065 0.04516 92 74 17 1
2451 Dream on. 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2452 The conundrums of climate change 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2453 Michael, you have already owed the boat ashore. 1.2065 0.05473 92 78 9 5
2454 Toward the Water! Toward the Water!!! 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2455 I'd rather crawl through the desert than ask for a hand out. 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2456 Here I am drowning and you just row right by. 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2457 OK, yes!....I need cheering up! Are there any tickets still available for the 7pm Bette Midler show on the main deck? 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2458 Race you to the next mirage, Tyrone. 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2459 Beware the white camel! 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2460 I can't find it...just put on your eyeglasses. 1.2065 0.05473 92 78 9 5
2461 Give me a lift? 1.2065 0.04516 92 74 17 1
2462 I'm crawlin' here! I'm crawlin' here! 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2463 You just had to second-guess the GPS! 1.2065 0.05473 92 78 9 5
2464 Would you stop splashing me, please? 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2465 Catch anything yet? 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2466 Way to ruin the mirage. 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2467 I told you that El Nino business was baloney! 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2468 Weren't you in last week's cartoon? 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2469 Wait until the tide comes in. 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2470 I said "Desert Rose" not rows! 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2471 What say I hop a ride in your mirage to catch mine? 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2472 I don"t care that your name is Michael- it's my turn to row 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2473 great deal on that Arizona ocean front property 1.2021 0.05365 94 80 9 5
2474 Let's make this one a real head scratcher for New Yorker captioneers. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2475 What are you—making fun of my mirage? 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2476 You were supposed to leave that for the women and children! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2477 Dummy, the lyrics are, "Michael rode the boat ashore, hallelujah." Not miles past the shore! TO the shore, TO the shore! 1.2000 0.05519 90 77 8 5
2478 Stroke...stroke...stroke. That's it. 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
2479 Follow me. 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2480 starbord! starboard you idiot! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2481 I meant a camel you idiot! 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2482 Dude, you could at least throw me a life vest. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2483 That's no way to honor the memory of the captain we ate. 1.2000 0.05519 90 77 8 5
2484 Michael, just because the song says you do, doesn't mean you have to keep going! 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2485 There isn't a stream and I'd say life is but a dream 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
2486 The message in the bottle was pretty clear... I only take Uber. 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
2487 I know you don't believe in climate change...but ye gods ! 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2488 Ok it's your turn to be Wilson 1.2000 0.05519 90 77 8 5
2489 Either oar, I said. Either oar! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2490 What do you mean swim back to shore? 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2491 Will you please stop singing 'Row, Row, Row the boat! 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2492 Maybe now they'll take global warming seriously. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2493 Hey, that's the carpool lane! 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2494 You're rowing against the tide, that's why! 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2495 Hey Man, wait up! I've been trying to catch up with you since that last mirage. 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
2496 Crossfit makes me feel the burn. 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2497 Well! So much for gently down the stream. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2498 Any room in there? 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2499 Hey! You! Global warming is a hoax and I can prove it! 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2500 Forget that "merrily, merrily stuff," it's my turn to row. 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2501 This was a freshwater lake before Trump's EPA. 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2502 What part of 'gently up the stream' didn't you understand? 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2503 You forgot the beer ??!!! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2504 You didn't say "on your left" 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2505 I could go for a drink, you know a good place around here? 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2506 Could you stop it with the sand in my face, LEONARD? 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2507 Dog paddling is a lot harder than I thought 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2508 You try the butterfly. I like the crawl. 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2509 One sec - told you I'd have to get out and stretch. 1.2000 0.05519 90 77 8 5
2510 Watch your wake -- I can't swim! 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2511 What is life really is but a dream? 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
2512 No, I do not want to get out and dry off. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2513 You cut down the oasis trees for this?! 1.2000 0.05741 90 78 6 6
2514 Denier! 1.2000 0.05519 90 77 8 5
2515 And where were you 37 years ago, when I needed you? 1.2000 0.05519 90 77 8 5
2516 Al Gore, I presume!? 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
2517 Row, row your boat, gently down, the what?! The what?! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2518 That's a hellavu mirage! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2519 Slow down! My skis are two dunes back! 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
2520 You ruined my mirage! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2521 Hallelujah already! 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
2522 Let me back in. I'm afraid of sand sharks. 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2523 Pull over for happy hour at the next sand bar. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2524 I'll race you to the mirage! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2525 How was I supposed to know the tide went out? 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2526 ...the sand is getting deep...permission to come aboard 1.2000 0.05519 90 77 8 5
2527 In your hallucination, am I doing the doggy paddle? 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2528 My phone's gotta be around here somewhere 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2529 You must be out of your skull. 1.2000 0.05519 90 77 8 5
2530 Don't just sit there, help me into the boat! 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2531 Desert boat? I asked for desert BOOTS! 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
2532 Just so I’m clear…if we win this final immunity challenge we get off the island, right? 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2533 I heard the warnings about more rapid climate change, but still I thought I had time for a swim. 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2534 Are all cartoonists this sadistic? 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2535 There's an easier way, but don't take my word for it. 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2536 Trust me, this is not a simple matter of lightening the load. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2537 Is there anything you won't do the hard way, Leonard? 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2538 Quick--throw me a lifesaver! 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2539 Is that one of those new Teslas? 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2540 That be land! Land ho! 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
2541 I *told* you climate change was real! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2542 I said I wanted a Land ROVER for Christmas ... 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2543 Okay, it’s an Inconvenient Truth. But are the props necessary? 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2544 We are definitely still in Kansas! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2545 Yeah, I tried drinking it. 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
2546 So he was right all along-- sea levels aren't rising. 1.2000 0.04525 90 73 16 1
2547 Sorry Hank, I'm the captain. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2548 Is now really the time for cardio? 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
2549 You should have said you couldn't drive stick. 1.2000 0.05519 90 77 8 5
2550 You said it sprang a leak! 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
2551 Are we refugees yet? 1.1978 0.05463 91 78 8 5
2552 OK, I am definitely the captain now. 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
2553 Do I look like Jesus?? 1.1978 0.04996 91 76 12 3
2554 SHUT UP LARRY !! I've had ENOUGH of your, dry humor jokes!! 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
2555 Aye, aye Captain. Permission to come aboard? 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
2556 When I used my one wish on a boat, I didn't know the desert island would be so big. 1.1978 0.05463 91 78 8 5
2557 You called the Auto Club? 1.1978 0.04996 91 76 12 3
2558 Sorry, woman and children only 1.1978 0.04996 91 76 12 3
2559 Don't leave me, you know I can't swim! 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
2560 No doubt persistence is why we survived at sea, all I'm saying is we reached the shore at dawn. 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
2561 I can help. I rowed stroke for Harvard. 1.1978 0.05682 91 79 6 6
2562 So do you think we can count n the oceans rising or are you a Trump guy? 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
2563 It's about the Guinness Book of world records. You? 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
2564 If I get there first, I'll bring back water. 1.1978 0.05463 91 78 8 5
2565 Is it my turn now??? 1.1978 0.04480 91 74 16 1
2566 Oh my god! Use the treadmill for once and leave me the Rowmaster. 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
2567 Must be rowing against the current? 1.1978 0.04996 91 76 12 3
2568 Got room for a castaway? I've been swimming for days! 1.1978 0.04480 91 74 16 1
2569 Have you thought about an outboard? 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
2570 Even if global warming IS a fallacy, you can't row without water. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2571 Okay, but this is the last time. Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream... 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2572 You always win. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2573 By chance, have you seen Wilson. 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2574 You'll get your just deserts! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2575 How many espressos did you say you had before jumping into the lifeboat? 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2576 When I was singing, "Michael Row Your Boat Ashore" I didn't mean all the way to the damn desert. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2577 Okay, take me to the more realistic mirage. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2578 Okay, leave without me. But I'm reporting your lack of life jackets. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2579 What's with the desert with no island?!? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2580 Get off your knees, Mr. Gore. No matter how much you beg, you're not going to convince me that global warming is real! 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2581 We hit the shore a long time ago, Michael! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2582 You're hogging all the imaginary water! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2583 Are we clear on the bet? GO! 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2584 Michael, is that really you? 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2585 Michael! Stop rowing the boat ashore! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2586 It is your turn to do the fishing. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2587 Don't you see I'm drowning!! 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2588 A canoe would have been so much easier. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2589 Oh I see, very nice.. Mr Fancy Sand Boat with Fancy Sand Oars... 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2590 The moment when Louis and Clark realized they took a wrong turn. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2591 Let me pass. You are messing with my mirage. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2592 Okay, I'll row and YOU ski. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2593 To you, maybe, it's 'but a dream.' 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2594 I'm starting to question your grip on reality! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2595 These new fitness crazes are getting out of hand. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2596 Now do you believe me about the drought? 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2597 I don't care if its vintage Chris-Craft. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2598 Hey! You know you're supposed to stay at least 5 yards from free swimmers! 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2599 Paddle or no paddle - we're up sh•t's creek. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2600 The lake is back the other way. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2601 No, for your information, I am not dog paddling. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2602 Did you just shout 'sand ahoy'? 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2603 C'mon, Eric, let me back in. I promise, no more back-seat rowing! 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2604 Do you take credit cards? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2605 No, I don't want to sing it as a round this time! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2606 Peleo or Atkins? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2607 Still think it's all a hoax Frank? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2608 Dammit, Bob: I am NOT a hitchhiker - let me in! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2609 As I said at my confirmation hearing, I 'm still sure the scientists are wrong. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2610 Last one to the oasis is a rotten egg. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2611 Do younger brothers ALWAYS have to compete? 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2612 Departing of the Red Sea....some miracle! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2613 I thought I told you to bring the JEEP! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2614 I'll stop doing the crawl stroke when you stop rocking the boat. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2615 I'll take my chances with the sharks! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2616 What about changing places? I'll row and you'll swim! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2617 I request permission to come aboard, sir. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2618 They were out of tabasco sauce. 1.1932 0.05796 88 77 5 6
2619 One man crawls and another man rows into a sand bar . . . 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2620 Can I please be part of your mirage? 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
2621 No, you should have taken a left at the fork. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2622 Denying Global Warming doesn’t make it go away, you know. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2623 Ahoy? Gimme a break. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2624 and then I'm going to hand you your "merrily, merrily" ass! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2625 I thought global warming was a hoax. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2626 Will you stop critiquing my breast stroke? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2627 I told you you went the wrong way 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2628 Don't look now, but you are going in the wrong direction. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2629 Nice Shirt. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2630 Noah, this isn't what He was talking about! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2631 I always wondered who was responsible for the crop circles 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2632 Still think climate change is bull Ahab. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2633 When I said "Send me a life boat," this isn't what I meant. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2634 DAMMIT Michael - 'ashore' - why do you always HAVE to be such an over-achiever?! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2635 I just think it's a bit selfish, that's all. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2636 I'll circle back one more time, see if you didn't drop it back there! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2637 OK! If you say so, global warming exists. Now can you let me back in before I drown? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2638 The US after new immigration policy is implemented 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2639 Ahoy, matey! Any chance you be looking for water too? 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2640 Is that so? I'll remind you that one man's dream is another's nightmare. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2641 What do you mean you forgot what you went for! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2642 No Professor I don't see any icebergs ahead and would you stop calling me Ginger? 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2643 It sure took you long enough after the man overboard signal was given. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2644 I'm tired of hearing about CrossFit. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2645 In hindsight, vacationing on a desert island was probably not the best choice. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2646 Guess I took 'Michael row the boat ashore' a bit too literal. 1.1932 0.06017 88 78 3 7
2647 Splash me again and I will rock your boat. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2648 Watch it! I'm swimmin' here! 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2649 See? Global warming is a myth. 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2650 Get out, it's my turn to play in the boat 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2651 You know Stan, this year's office retreat may finally be the one that breaks me. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2652 Rent is cheap, and with a couple of podcasts you don’t even notice the commute. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2653 We would row a lot faster if you would help me find the anchor! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2654 I guess this would be called sailing the low seas. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2655 You do realize that you are ship out of luck? 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2656 I just wanted a Klondike bar. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2657 Feels like old times, doesn't it? 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2658 Oasis? Boy are you lost! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2659 Didn't they warn you? It never rains in California 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2660 What time do we need to return the beach chairs? 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2661 For God's sake, stop singing that song!" 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2662 your rowing in a mirage,you idiot! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2663 "Survivor" has officially run out of ideas. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2664 No wake! 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2665 One more chorus of that infernal song, and I'll row, row, row you into a sandy grave. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2666 He won? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2667 You get your exercise your way, and I'll get mine my way. 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
2668 Dammit. Looks like we had the same hallucination. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2669 Sorry, Captain, my mirage ain't big enough for the both of us. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2670 You said the Prius wasn't eco-friendly enough and now look at us! 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2671 One of us is an hallucination. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2672 We've got two paddles, but we're still stuck up s$&t's creek! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2673 First you were a climate change denier, and now this! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2674 I'm still going to win! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2675 Don't worry, he said. We'll find land, he said. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2676 Really! Why don't you just flap those oars and FLY OUT OF HERE! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2677 Forget the nav system. Let's just walk. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2678 It's a mirage you jackass. And where the hell did you get a boat anyhow? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2679 Race you to the next oasis. 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2680 OK, I think you've proven your point about the liquid-like qualities of sand. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2681 For God's sake, man, get your tropes straight! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2682 You Millennials are always taking shortcuts! 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2683 I saw a phone booth. You paddle, I'll direct. Do you have a dime? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2684 Maybe global warming ISN'T a hoax. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2685 No! You’re supposed to sing ‘”Gently down the stream” at the same timeI sing “Life is but a dream 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2686 Still think crossing the border by land and sea is such a poetic way to flee the inauguration, Walt Whitman? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2687 Beats driving in LA. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2688 At least throw me a life jacket! 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2689 Yield to the right! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2690 Which one of us is a mirage? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2691 I may crawl, and you may stroke, but we're both going to croak. 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
2692 Mother always liked you better. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2693 Don't you know this is a no wake zone? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2694 You've got to let me on board, I'm going to drown out here. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2695 I don't care how good of a back workout it is! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2696 I still don't think this is the English Channel. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2697 I am NOT going to call you "Matey." 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2698 Maybe we should revisit the decision to keep the boat... 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2699 I do know "Row Row Row Your Boat", but you need three for a perpetual canon. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2700 Sand, sand everywhere and not a sand which to eat. 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
2701 Just stop calling me Sandy! 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2702 I'm waiting for the local 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2703 Still think it's a Chinese hoax? 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2704 Are you really sure this will be in the Olympics by 2024? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2705 I yelled ‘heat stroke.’ Not ‘stroke’. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2706 The ad I saw on TV did not say this was a side effect! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2707 Yes, I do happen to think you can take cross training too far! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2708 You call that gently? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2709 Not me, I called for a Lyft. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2710 Put on a life jacket, you moron! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2711 Virtual reality would be better with some air conditioning. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2712 Hey, this is my hallucination! You could at least pick me up! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2713 You high-tech guys! Always in a hurry! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2714 Damn that white whale! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2715 Maybe it's the heat talking, but this water doesn't taste as salty as I thought it would 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2716 No life jacket? Well, that's dangerous! 1.1932 0.04233 88 71 17 0
2717 There's no stream, and this is no dream. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2718 Maybe it's a metaphor for how ugly and dangerous things have become. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2719 Wanna trade places ? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2720 At least I"m not taking this sitting down! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2721 You can have any kind of mirage you want, but at least have the decency not to row sand in my face. 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2722 I need to find the ring or she won't let me back in the house. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2723 I said use your core! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2724 ...Hey, get your boat out of my garden!... 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2725 I will not sing another verse of "row, row, row your boat!" 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2726 Still a skeptic of global warming, huh? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2727 I guess you need water too... 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2728 How about we switch it up when we hit the coast? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2729 With all due respect, Mr. President, I'm happy to report that The Clean Water Act was successfully repealed. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2730 No, I don't have a propeller. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2731 You global-warming deniers sure are consistent. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2732 Take it easy, it's just a mirage. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2733 You could at least throw me a life preserver. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2734 Forgive me, I didn't actually abandon the ship, I just wanted to stretch my legs. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2735 Can you PLEASE put more emotion into your part! Believe me, "The Old Man and the Sand" is going to be a huge box office success and win us both an Oscar!!!! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2736 Now you're just being a jerk! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2737 If I hear any more "Michael Row the Boat Ashore", it won't be pretty. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2738 At long last ... a stroke of good luck. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2739 You said high tide was coming! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2740 That genie gave you one wish! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2741 When I said we needed a ship of the desert ... 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2742 No, I don't need a #**$#@ life preserver! 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2743 I'm tired of swimming, it's my turn to row. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2744 Technology is not the answer for everything. 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2745 Say "not a drop to drink" one more time...I dare you! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2746 Hey! Who's mirage is this? 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2747 Can you please stop singing Proud Mary? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2748 You only had ONE job! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2749 Look where you are rowing !#%*! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2750 This gives a new meaning to: "Michael rowed the boat ashore." 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2751 Hey buddy - the passing lane is on the right! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2752 You and your goddamned optimism! 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
2753 Sing that one more time, and that paddle's going right up your stern. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2754 When are you going to stop worrying about getting back your deposit on the boat? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2755 OK. OK. It was a mirage. Do you really have to rub it in? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2756 I think I feel a fish. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2757 You're late. 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
2758 Sure, "life is but a dream" you. You've got the boat. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2759 You should've turned left at the dry river bed. 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2760 I don't believe in global warming. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2761 I'm begging you... give me a ride!!! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2762 Why do you always pass me by? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
2763 Repeal was easy, replace is hard. 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2764 Your mirage keeps paddling sand in my face! 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
2765 Can you stop splashing sand in my fac 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
2766 Jesus, shouldn't you be walking on the water? 1.1910 0.05270 89 76 9 4
2767 Really, you christened it "Boaty McBoatface"? That's so 2016. 1.1910 0.05022 89 75 11 3
2768 Why don't you just face global warming like the rest of us? 1.1910 0.05507 89 77 7 5
2769 Life's about a dream? Hand me that oar... 1.1910 0.05270 89 76 9 4
2770 That's a tough way to land the merit badge. 1.1910 0.05270 89 76 9 4
2771 Must you keep humming 'Michael rowed the boat ashore?' 1.1910 0.05022 89 75 11 3
2772 No Carl! Right now life is but a horrific nightmare! 1.1910 0.05022 89 75 11 3
2773 We won! We found the source of Trump Natural Spring Water! 1.1889 0.05216 90 77 9 4
2774 Slow Down! This is a low wake zone. 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
2775 Global warming, global schmarming. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2776 Just give me three more strokes and we're there. 1.1839 0.05305 87 75 8 4
2777 Can't you at least throw me a life preserver. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2778 Where's the fire? 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2779 Homeless. Will row for water. God Bless. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2780 Hopefully we are both going in the right direction 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2781 I don't care how you meant it. Your tone was entirely condescending! 1.1839 0.05305 87 75 8 4
2782 We've been off course for 24 hours and you just noticed it now? 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2783 At least you won't have a problem with barnacles. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2784 For God's sake, stop with the "row, row, row your boat"! 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2785 Freshman physics says I'm going to win. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2786 I KNEW YOU'D RUN IT AGROUND! 1.1839 0.05551 87 76 6 5
2787 Just because you don't know how to swim doesn't mean you shouldn't get out of your boat and try! 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2788 What's your definition of rescue! 1.1839 0.04178 87 71 16 0
2789 Where on earth did you rent that thing? 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2790 I don't see this sand-shark you keep mentioning. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2791 That song was wrong, life is not a dream! 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2792 Everywhere I go, traffic's at a flippin' crawl. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2793 I don't think I can make it. Can you pull me onboard? 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2794 No, I have not seen a white whale! 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2795 I was at a restaurant and they asked me if I wanted dessert, what's your story? 1.1839 0.05551 87 76 6 5
2796 Holy Moses! 1.1839 0.05305 87 75 8 4
2797 "No, I did not say row for help". 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2798 How much farther to the Aral Sea? 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2799 Don't I know you! 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2800 "You" crawl. It's "my" turn to row! 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2801 I don’t care what the Weather Channel says! 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
2802 The sign back there clearly states "SWIMMERS ONLY " along this section the beach! 1.1839 0.05305 87 75 8 4
2803 Do you need a lift? 1.1839 0.05551 87 76 6 5
2804 Does it look like I would happen to have a spare anchor? 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2805 Have you seen water? 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
2806 Stroke! . . . Stroke! . . . Stroke! . . . 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
2807 one of us is a mirage 1.1839</