Contest #536


Cartoon

536


Name Value
Submission deadline -
Voting started 2016-09-12
Voting ended -
Finalists announced -
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued 2016-09-25 (estimated)
Number of captions 6599
Number of responses 415065
Number of participants 17710


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Sometimes a dipstick is just a dipstick. 2.2621 0.01778 2614 827 275 1512
1 The impotence, that feeling of being out of control when you find yourself parallel parking against your will, probably started when you were being assembled. 1.8199 0.05879 261 145 18 98
2 I'd like to see you again in two thousand miles. 1.8016 0.05088 247 108 80 59
3 I'm afraid we're out of time, but I'd like to see you again in 5,000 miles … 1.7376 0.05639 202 98 59 45
4 And was this your first breakdown? 1.7216 0.05541 194 92 64 38
5 Where do the voices tell you to go? 1.7188 0.05834 192 97 52 43
6 So you're no longer attending your AAA meetings? 1.7120 0.05920 191 99 48 44
7 And are the clowns inside you now? 1.7017 0.06265 181 99 37 45
8 I don't think I'm charging you enough. 1.6944 0.06057 180 95 45 40
9 We have to end for today, but I've set your next session for 3 months or 3,000 miles, whichever comes sooner. 1.6927 0.05661 179 87 60 32
10 I just can't seem to control my emissions. 1.6802 0.06210 172 93 41 38
11 Wait, back up. 1.6746 0.05967 169 87 50 32
12 My father had a checkered past. 1.6519 0.06281 158 86 41 31
13 Lots of cars fall in love with their mechanic. It's called transmission. 1.6497 0.06445 157 88 36 33
14 Tell me about your last breakdown. 1.6429 0.06559 154 88 33 33
15 You got yourself here. That's a good start. 1.6405 0.05982 153 79 50 24
16 And how many clowns do you think are inside you *right now*? 1.6405 0.06727 153 90 28 35
17 My mother was an Escort. 1.6405 0.06466 153 86 36 31
18 I believe you are expeeriencing Prius envy. 1.6309 0.06484 149 84 36 29
19 Back up a moment 1.6267 0.06024 150 79 48 23
20 Let's back up. 1.6207 0.06117 145 77 46 22
21 I know this is unprofessional, but could you drop me home after our session? 1.6190 0.06641 147 86 31 30
22 These voices inside - do they always tell you where to go? 1.6164 0.06611 146 85 32 29
23 When did you first realize you had a fear of clowns? 1.6056 0.06921 142 87 24 31
24 Premature acceleration? 1.6028 0.06668 141 83 31 27
25 It's a classic case of Prius envy. 1.6000 0.06476 140 80 36 24
26 So tell me about these auto erotic fantasies. 1.6000 0.06476 140 80 36 24
27 I don't take auto insurance. 1.6000 0.06709 140 83 30 27
28 I'm tired of being the "smart" car. The girls all go for the muscle cars. 1.6000 0.06554 140 81 34 25
29 Let's go back to the day you found out you were pre-owned. 1.5985 0.06508 137 78 36 23
30 In your case I think a fear of clowns is perfectly rational. 1.5985 0.06751 137 81 30 26
31 And you feel that the road never hugs you in return? 1.5971 0.06354 139 78 39 22
32 And do you consume ethanol on a daily basis? 1.5971 0.06271 139 77 41 21
33 Would you describe yourself as a self-starter? 1.5942 0.06226 138 76 42 20
34 First of all, do you have insurance? 1.5912 0.06433 137 78 37 22
35 Well, I can validate your feelings, but not your parking. 1.5896 0.06634 134 78 33 23
36 You can break down if you need to. 1.5852 0.06342 135 76 39 20
37 I'm afraid we're out of time. Is someone coming to pick you up? 1.5821 0.06294 134 75 40 19
38 Well, problems may appear larger in your rearview. 1.5802 0.06315 131 73 40 18
39 You bet I'm going to charge you. 1.5802 0.06764 131 78 30 23
40 How much baggage could you possibly have? 1.5769 0.06448 130 74 37 19
41 Tell me more about your auto body experience. 1.5758 0.06812 132 80 28 24
42 Let's shift gears for a moment. 1.5736 0.06674 129 76 32 21
43 My longest relationship only lasted six blocks. 1.5669 0.06575 127 74 34 19
44 So tell me what drove you here 1.5635 0.06522 126 73 35 18
45 How long have you felt you don't know where to turn? 1.5600 0.06365 125 71 38 16
46 What drove you into therapy? 1.5591 0.06768 127 77 29 21
47 Would you describe yourself as self-driven? 1.5565 0.06304 124 70 39 15
48 That voice you hear in your head? It's the radio. 1.5565 0.06407 124 71 37 16
49 How long have you been afraid of clowns? 1.5565 0.07179 124 79 21 24
50 If they trust me, why do I have a steering wheel? 1.5565 0.06608 124 73 33 18
51 Well, our time's up here, any chance you are heading toward downtown? 1.5565 0.06900 124 76 27 21
52 Let's back up for a minute. 1.5565 0.06508 124 72 35 17
53 Look, the squirrel had choices... 1.5565 0.06994 124 77 25 22
54 How long have you had these feelings that you are being controlled by others? 1.5556 0.06430 126 73 36 17
55 Let's talk about why you automatically lock everyone out. 1.5528 0.06551 123 72 34 17
56 All my life they said, "Porsche's the pretty one, you're the smart one." 1.5528 0.07042 123 77 24 22
57 Unfortunately, we don't accept car insurance. 1.5528 0.07136 123 78 22 23
58 Have you tried turning yourself off and on again. 1.5528 0.06946 123 76 26 21
59 So, what really turns you on? 1.5528 0.06850 123 75 28 20
60 It's a clinical condition we refer to as Prius Envy. 1.5528 0.06946 123 76 26 21
61 Sure, you're a smart car. But are you a happy car? 1.5492 0.06697 122 73 31 18
62 Do you mind, just this session, if we talk about something other than the road less traveled? 1.5492 0.07371 122 80 17 25
63 Let's talk about your tendency to avoid things. 1.5492 0.07090 122 77 23 22
64 Tell me more about the nightmare with the clowns. 1.5492 0.06994 122 76 25 21
65 Have you tried turning yourself off and then on again? 1.5492 0.06279 122 69 39 14
66 He just sits in you and does nothing? 1.5492 0.06994 122 76 25 21
67 So let's be clear. This voice inside you tells you not only where to go but how to get there? 1.5455 0.06943 121 75 26 20
68 Tell me about your control issues. 1.5455 0.06320 121 69 38 14
69 Please put the reverse camera on and look at me when I talk to you. 1.5378 0.06729 119 72 30 17
70 Yes, Prius envy is very common. 1.5378 0.06622 119 71 32 16
71 I'd like to work on your "my way or the highway" attitude. 1.5339 0.06881 118 73 27 18
72 The next half hour is free if you can give me a ride to the airport afterwards. 1.5339 0.07088 118 75 23 20
73 That many clowns would frighten anyone. 1.5339 0.07088 118 75 23 20
74 I think you could benefit from an AAA meeting. 1.5339 0.06557 118 70 33 15
75 How many clowns? 1.5339 0.06881 118 73 27 18
76 I’m sorry but I don’t accept AAA. 1.5339 0.06557 118 70 33 15
77 We have to stop now. Could you run me uptown? 1.5333 0.06894 120 75 26 19
78 It's nothing to be ashamed about. Prius Envy is actually quite common. 1.5323 0.06817 124 78 26 20
79 Are you finding these emissions are primarily nocturnal? 1.5299 0.06928 117 73 26 18
80 Tell me more about your control issues. 1.5299 0.07138 117 75 22 20
81 You're supposed to have avoidance issues. 1.5299 0.06712 117 71 30 16
82 I'm afraid you are suffering from Prius envy. 1.5299 0.06928 117 73 26 18
83 You've got a classic case of Prius envy. 1.5299 0.06712 117 71 30 16
84 Reframe it. You're not driverless. You're self-driven. Big difference. 1.5299 0.06712 117 71 30 16
85 Given your history, the fear of clowns is more than understandable. But could you say you just feel 'so used' in general? 1.5299 0.07034 117 74 24 19
86 Seriously, if you don't cut back on the ethanol, I can't help you. 1.5299 0.06928 117 73 26 18
87 Have you considered the possibility that these "accidents" might actually by your fault. 1.5299 0.06821 117 72 28 17
88 This is a classic case of Prius envy. 1.5299 0.06928 117 73 26 18
89 I'm a Smart Car, but I'm not living up to my potential 1.5299 0.06712 117 71 30 16
90 Blue Book cannot determine your true self-worth. 1.5259 0.06532 116 69 33 14
91 It's perfectly normal, we all have gas. 1.5259 0.06976 116 73 25 18
92 Did you have any trouble finding my office? 1.5259 0.06178 116 66 39 11
93 Do you think perhaps you're being Uber sensitive? 1.5259 0.06868 116 72 27 17
94 So let's delve further into this fear of clowns 1.5225 0.06992 111 69 26 16
95 Sometimes a tunnel is just a tunnel. 1.5225 0.07335 111 72 20 19
96 Let's talk about your autoeroticism. 1.5225 0.06992 111 69 26 16
97 You are a Smart Car; figure it out. 1.5225 0.06754 111 67 30 14
98 You seem to be headed for a breakdown. 1.5217 0.06691 115 70 30 15
99 Obviously, you're just not driven. 1.5217 0.06915 115 72 26 17
100 There's nothing driving me anymore. 1.5217 0.07239 115 75 20 20
101 Self-driving will not make you go blind. 1.5217 0.07133 115 74 22 19
102 Our hour is up, I recommend we meet again in 3,000 miles. 1.5217 0.06576 115 69 32 14
103 Just how long have you been cheating on your emission tests? 1.5217 0.06915 115 72 26 17
104 You've got a surprising amount of baggage. 1.5217 0.06915 115 72 26 17
105 Have you been skipping your AAA meetings again? 1.5217 0.06691 115 70 30 15
106 It appears you lack self-control. 1.5217 0.07025 115 73 24 18
107 Why don’t you let people in? 1.5214 0.06715 117 72 29 16
108 What's more important to you -- performance or size? 1.5175 0.06851 114 71 27 16
109 I feel like I'm going through life on autopilot 1.5133 0.07124 113 73 22 18
110 And how long have you felt this Prius envy? 1.5133 0.06666 113 69 30 14
111 "Nocturnal emissions? Really, nothing to worry about". 1.5133 0.06899 113 71 26 16
112 I understand, but first you really have to WANT to change lanes. 1.5133 0.06546 113 68 32 13
113 Sorry. Accepting a ride from you would be completely unprofessional. 1.5089 0.06590 112 68 31 13
114 You can come out now, Mr. Schwartz. The car isn't going to do the talking for you. 1.5089 0.07286 112 74 19 19
115 I am sorry I don't accept EZ Pass as a form of payment. 1.5089 0.07061 112 72 23 17
116 Let's back up a little. 1.5089 0.06341 112 66 35 11
117 Have you tried switching yourself off and on again? 1.5089 0.06711 112 69 29 14
118 It's not size that matters -- it's how long you can hold your charge. 1.5089 0.06711 112 69 29 14
119 The reason you're a wreck is because your father was a gas-guzzler and your mother was hooked on speed! 1.5089 0.07286 112 74 19 19
120 I think you might be overreacting. Sometimes a honk is just a honk. 1.5089 0.06711 112 69 29 14
121 If you want to get anywhere, you're going to have to let me in. 1.5089 0.06711 112 69 29 14
122 Your father was a gas guzzler? 1.5089 0.06947 112 71 25 16
123 I've lost all sense of direction. 1.5089 0.06711 112 69 29 14
124 Come back in 3,000 miles. 1.5088 0.06008 114 65 40 9
125 If you let that many clowns inside you, you're bound to feel guilty. 1.5088 0.06853 114 72 26 16
126 They expect me to drive myself, but they never ask me where I want to go. 1.5046 0.07094 109 70 23 16
127 I don't know what happened. I used to be so driven. 1.5046 0.06851 109 68 27 14
128 Yes, we validate. 1.5046 0.06335 109 64 35 10
129 Our hour is up. Do you need me to validate your parking....? 1.5046 0.07213 109 71 21 17
130 Do you see yourself as self-driven? 1.5046 0.06726 109 67 29 13
131 So what you're saying is, you have some sort of auto-immune disorder? 1.5046 0.07094 109 70 23 16
132 NO. I DON'T WANT TO CHECK YOUR DIP STICK! 1.5046 0.07445 109 73 17 19
133 I cannot live up to the hype. My parents were both smart cars. 1.5045 0.06757 111 69 28 14
134 And do these voices also tell you to commit moving violations? 1.5045 0.06995 111 71 24 16
135 Have you tried asking the clowns to take their shoes off before getting in? 1.5045 0.07226 111 73 20 18
136 Poor thing ... you've got Prius envy. 1.5045 0.06995 111 71 24 16
137 I believe you're suffering from Prius envy. 1.5045 0.07558 111 76 14 21
138 And when did you first realize you were a hybrid? 1.5045 0.06635 111 68 30 13
139 So, you say you have Prius-envy . . . 1.5045 0.07111 111 72 22 17
140 So let's talk about your Prius Envy... 1.5045 0.07111 111 72 22 17
141 There's the id, the ego, and the Uber-ego. 1.5044 0.07013 113 73 23 17
142 It could be Prius envy. 1.5000 0.07500 108 73 16 19
143 I'm going to prescribe a battery of lithium. 1.5000 0.06680 110 68 29 13
144 Prius envy is completely normal at your age 1.5000 0.06899 108 68 26 14
145 What are these voices telling you to do? 1.5000 0.06772 108 67 28 13
146 You don't seem driven. 1.5000 0.06643 108 66 30 12
147 You have an unusual case of Prius Envy. 1.5000 0.07023 108 69 24 15
148 Is your back up camera looking at my legs? 1.5000 0.07023 108 69 24 15
149 She said she needed more space. 1.5000 0.06680 110 68 29 13
150 There's no such thing as "Prius Envy." 1.5000 0.07023 108 69 24 15
151 I think we've been down that road before. 1.5000 0.06643 108 66 30 12
152 So at what point did you realize there was no driver? 1.4954 0.07094 109 71 22 16
153 I had the dream about the clowns again. 1.4953 0.07785 107 75 11 21
154 Sorry, I didn't mean to cut you off. 1.4953 0.06556 107 65 31 11
155 It's normal to feel empty inside. 1.4953 0.06948 107 68 25 14
156 Tell me about these nocturnal emissions. 1.4953 0.06948 107 68 25 14
157 You're going to have to learn to control yourself. 1.4953 0.06689 107 66 29 12
158 I have helicopter parents. 1.4907 0.07499 108 74 15 19
159 We all have our blind spots. 1.4907 0.06377 108 65 33 10
160 Self-driving doesn't mean self-actualized. 1.4907 0.07265 108 72 19 17
161 Tell me about your checkered past 1.4906 0.06997 106 68 24 14
162 I keep having this dream that someone is trying to control me. 1.4906 0.06735 106 66 28 12
163 Let's talk about your control issues. 1.4906 0.06867 106 67 26 13
164 Don't beat yourself up too much -- even a Smart car can do dumb things. 1.4906 0.06735 106 66 28 12
165 I used to feel driven, now I just feel used. 1.4906 0.06735 106 66 28 12
166 And we'll see you again in 3,000 miles or the next incident, whichever comes first. 1.4904 0.06831 104 65 27 12
167 Well you don't appear to me to be carrying a lot of baggage. 1.4860 0.06688 107 67 28 12
168 Exactly when did you begin to feel you had no need for people 1.4860 0.06555 107 66 30 11
169 You're not really lazy — you're just shiftless. 1.4860 0.06946 107 69 24 14
170 You're smart. But are you happy? 1.4860 0.07072 107 70 22 15
171 It sounds like you have some control issues. 1.4860 0.06419 107 65 32 10
172 I think you may be driving yourself too hard. 1.4857 0.06646 105 65 29 11
173 First, you have to admit that you have an emission problem. 1.4857 0.07176 105 69 21 15
174 At some point we all have to unlock our doors and let people in. 1.4857 0.06646 105 65 29 11
175 Lets talk more about your control issues. 1.4857 0.06646 105 65 29 11
176 Can you give me a lift home after our session? 1.4857 0.06782 105 66 27 12
177 You're not the first clown car to cry on the inside. 1.4857 0.07047 105 68 23 14
178 It seems to me you have serious control issues. 1.4857 0.06782 105 66 27 12
179 Everybody has a blind spot. 1.4857 0.06219 105 62 35 8
180 So, you sometimes feel that there are... people inside of you. Small people. Controlling you. Making you go places you wouldn't otherwise go. Is that it? 1.4857 0.06782 105 66 27 12
181 She says we should start parking together, but I need my own space. 1.4811 0.06995 106 69 23 14
182 I might be more helpful if you allow me to work on you from under the couch. 1.4811 0.06599 106 66 29 11
183 And you think having a middle finger would help? 1.4808 0.07356 104 70 18 16
184 Before we begin, I just want you to know we don't validate parking. 1.4808 0.07098 104 68 22 14
185 Everyone gets lost in Brooklyn 1.4808 0.06550 104 64 30 10
186 I am not here to tell you where to go. 1.4808 0.06965 104 67 24 13
187 Who turns you on?" 1.4808 0.06965 104 67 24 13
188 And was that first lube job consensual? 1.4808 0.07228 104 69 20 15
189 And why don't you think you're a smart car? 1.4808 0.06965 104 67 24 13
190 How long have you had your fear of clowns? 1.4808 0.07098 104 68 22 14
191 No need to feel guilty about tooting your own horn. 1.4808 0.06829 104 66 26 12
192 You may be the first self-loathing car, too. 1.4808 0.07727 104 73 12 19
193 Yes, I would consider that a Fordian slip. 1.4808 0.06829 104 66 26 12
194 And this voice inside, does it tell you to do other things than turn? 1.4804 0.06030 102 59 37 6
195 Most days I feel like I'm just spinning my wheels. 1.4766 0.06944 107 70 23 14
196 Tell me how you fuel. 1.4757 0.07410 103 70 17 16
197 If you leave the psychiatry to me, then I'll leave the driving to you. 1.4757 0.06737 103 65 27 11
198 You say he left you for a Tesla? 1.4757 0.06877 103 66 25 12
199 Are you saying you don't feel smart because you think you look dumb? 1.4757 0.07281 103 69 19 15
200 I want to be a clown car... but I feel empty inside. 1.4757 0.07538 103 71 15 17
201 Would you say you're no longer driven by other people? 1.4706 0.06926 102 66 24 12
202 Yes, I do validate parking 1.4706 0.06491 102 63 30 9
203 Start with when you first recognized that you're a hybrid. 1.4706 0.06639 102 64 28 10
204 So the cars in the commercials seem much larger, and the women driving them much happier. Go on. 1.4706 0.06639 102 64 28 10
205 No, I don't take E-Z Pass. 1.4706 0.06784 102 65 26 11
206 Maybe it's time you stop and ask for directions 1.4706 0.06784 102 65 26 11
207 Are you just here for validation? 1.4706 0.07064 102 67 22 13
208 From where I sit, I'd say you have more of a gas problem. 1.4706 0.06926 102 66 24 12
209 So, just when did he leave you for a newer model? 1.4706 0.06491 102 63 30 9
210 And where do YOU want to go? 1.4706 0.07064 102 67 22 13
211 Look, nobody likes to lose that new car smell. 1.4706 0.06340 102 62 32 8
212 I guess my troubles started when I found out my mother was a rental car. 1.4706 0.07200 102 68 20 14
213 It's important you don't confuse depression with a low battery. 1.4706 0.06784 102 65 26 11
214 Before we get started, I need to mention some problems with your insurance. 1.4706 0.07064 102 67 22 13
215 So what drove you to seek therapy? 1.4706 0.06340 102 62 32 8
216 Do you feel as though you lack auto autonomy? 1.4667 0.07421 105 73 15 17
217 You seem to have issues with self-control. 1.4653 0.06381 101 62 31 8
218 Let's explore your desire to live life in the fast lane. 1.4653 0.06831 101 65 25 11
219 It’s perfectly natural to feel rejected and empty inside. After all, 37 clowns did trade you in for a Prius. 1.4653 0.07253 101 68 19 14
220 What drove you to get help 1.4653 0.06684 101 64 27 10
221 Maybe you're driving yourself too hard. 1.4653 0.06684 101 64 27 10
222 And you feel having all those clowns cram inside of you is the reason you haven't been able to start up? 1.4653 0.07388 101 69 17 15
223 Listen, nobody finds their way around Brooklyn the first time 1.4653 0.06831 101 65 25 11
224 I guess I've taken a few wrong turns in life. 1.4653 0.06684 101 64 27 10
225 What brought you here today? 1.4653 0.07115 101 67 21 13
226 Tell me more about your recurring dream. Do you still wake up screaming every time the band plays “Send in the Clowns? " 1.4653 0.07906 101 73 9 19
227 You need to accept that you're in the driver's seat now. 1.4653 0.06535 101 63 29 9
228 I'm sorry but I can't validate your parking. 1.4653 0.07115 101 67 21 13
229 I can't help if you won't let me under your hood. 1.4653 0.06381 101 62 31 8
230 So, self control. Tell me more about the stain in the driveway. 1.4653 0.06974 101 66 23 12
231 I encourage you to toot your own horn now and then. 1.4653 0.06381 101 62 31 8
232 I can help you, but it's only good for 90 days or 3000 miles, whichever comes first. 1.4653 0.06974 101 66 23 12
233 So, have you thought about where YOU want to go? 1.4653 0.06381 101 62 31 8
234 I think it's time for you to take a hard look in the rear-view mirror. 1.4608 0.07329 102 70 17 15
235 Tell me more about that 'clown' inside you. What is he saying to you now? 1.4608 0.07060 102 68 21 13
236 Wait . . . you feel like there are how many clowns inside you just waiting to get out? 1.4600 0.07443 100 69 16 15
237 When we're done can you take me home? 1.4600 0.07306 100 68 18 14
238 But which self is driving now? 1.4600 0.07306 100 68 18 14
239 It's not just a label! You are a smart car. 1.4600 0.07306 100 68 18 14
240 I just want to be told I'm a smart car. 1.4600 0.06730 100 64 26 10
241 How do you see yourself going forward? 1.4600 0.05932 100 59 36 5
242 You may find this session very troubling, so I hope you have someone to drive you home. 1.4600 0.06423 100 62 30 8
243 Ever since the recall, I've just felt like a part of me is missing. 1.4600 0.06878 100 65 24 11
244 Your problems obviously stem from issues with your motherboard. 1.4600 0.06423 100 62 30 8
245 I can assure you that no one is driving you insane. 1.4600 0.06878 100 65 24 11
246 I'm so confused....I don't know which way to turn. 1.4600 0.05581 100 57 40 3
247 Tell me the dream about the clowns again. 1.4600 0.07166 100 67 20 13
248 You dream of how many clowns? 1.4600 0.07443 100 69 16 15
249 And in your dream, had you studied for your carbon emission test? 1.4600 0.07166 100 67 20 13
250 Your oil has to want to change. 1.4600 0.07166 100 67 20 13
251 Tell me, what brings you here? 1.4600 0.06878 100 65 24 11
252 It's always 'turn left, turn right,' never 'follow your dreams Carl.' 1.4600 0.07306 100 68 18 14
253 It's about the journey. 1.4600 0.06264 100 61 32 7
254 You were giving the wrong signals.... 1.4600 0.06878 100 65 24 11
255 You are still smart, just not Uber smart. 1.4600 0.06878 100 65 24 11
256 It all started with a bunch of clowns. 1.4592 0.07131 98 65 21 12
257 You're going to have to give me some sort of signal. 1.4563 0.06728 103 67 25 11
258 Now, tell me about these auto-erotic tendencies. 1.4545 0.07218 99 67 19 13
259 Blaming everything on your motherboard isn't very productive. 1.4545 0.06926 99 65 23 11
260 You have Acceleration Deficit Disorder . 1.4545 0.07359 99 68 17 14
261 I'm hearing a lot of suppressed road rage. 1.4545 0.06926 99 65 23 11
262 Do you consider yourself driven? 1.4545 0.06465 99 62 29 8
263 Tooting your own horn is perfectly normal for a car your age. 1.4545 0.07074 99 66 21 12
264 As you get older, it's natural that you have a harder time holding a charge. 1.4545 0.06303 99 61 31 7
265 Premature acceleration is very common with your model. 1.4500 0.07160 100 68 19 13
266 I need a new Lithium prescription. 1.4490 0.07124 98 66 20 12
267 Of course I could stop if I wanted to. 1.4490 0.06822 98 64 24 10
268 I'm sorry, but only a manufacturer can prescribe premium unleaded 1.4490 0.07124 98 66 20 12
269 Let's get back to your control issues 1.4490 0.07124 98 66 20 12
270 Can we talk a little more about these control issues? 1.4490 0.06822 98 64 24 10
271 Performance issues? 1.4490 0.06822 98 64 24 10
272 We don't care what your meter says, 50 minutes is an hour. 1.4490 0.07270 98 67 18 13
273 Sure - I pick up lots of women but it never turns into anything meaningful. 1.4490 0.06975 98 65 22 11
274 I hate to cut you off. 1.4490 0.07413 98 68 16 14
275 What makes you think your parents wanted an SUV? 1.4490 0.06666 98 63 26 9
276 Siri told me to get lost. 1.4490 0.06666 98 63 26 9
277 If I can't get you to open up to me, then how am I going to get home? 1.4490 0.07692 98 70 12 16
278 And how long have you had this fear of clowns? 1.4490 0.07554 98 69 14 15
279 So, tell me more about those voices you hear inside. 1.4490 0.06975 98 65 22 11
280 Not everyone is cut out for life in the fast lane. 1.4490 0.06822 98 64 24 10
281 When did you lose your sense of direction? 1.4490 0.07124 98 66 20 12
282 You're fine, get over it, now take me home. 1.4490 0.07270 98 67 18 13
283 Well, let's start with how you got here. 1.4479 0.07235 96 65 19 12
284 The cruel irony, doc, is I have no idea where I'm going in life. 1.4479 0.06601 96 61 27 8
285 Prius envy is not uncommon in your make and model. 1.4479 0.07082 96 64 21 11
286 She hasn't touched my dipstick in over 5,000 miles. 1.4479 0.06765 96 62 25 9
287 Decreases in drive and appetite are quite normal for a hybrid. 1.4479 0.06765 96 62 25 9
288 Maybe you shouldn't drive yourself so hard. 1.4479 0.07385 96 66 17 13
289 And you hear these voices only when you're driving? 1.4479 0.07082 96 64 21 11
290 And has your family been supportive as you transition into an all electric? 1.4479 0.07385 96 66 17 13
291 You're a 2009 and she's a 2016? 1.4479 0.06082 96 58 33 5
292 I think this is a classic case of Prius envy. 1.4479 0.07818 96 69 11 16
293 Why do you think you have such trouble taking directions? 1.4479 0.06260 96 59 31 6
294 So, what brought you in today? 1.4479 0.07235 96 65 19 12
295 It sounds like you are struggling with control issues. 1.4479 0.06765 96 62 25 9
296 People think I'm shiftless 1.4479 0.06765 96 62 25 9
297 In retrospect, all the signs were there. 1.4479 0.07385 96 66 17 13
298 I just... don't feel as driven as I used to. 1.4479 0.06433 96 60 29 7
299 Now, when you say you were jumped - where did he put the cable? 1.4479 0.07532 96 67 15 14
300 So let's just back up a bit..... No, don't! 1.4479 0.06765 96 62 25 9
301 Tell me more about these control issues... 1.4479 0.06925 96 63 23 10
302 Let's begin by exploring what drove you to drive yourself here. 1.4479 0.07082 96 64 21 11
303 And when did the voices in your dashboard start? 1.4479 0.07385 96 66 17 13
304 Sure I'm in control, but I'm not driven. 1.4479 0.06765 96 62 25 9
305 Oh, I am not a doctor or writing notes. This is a parking ticket. 1.4479 0.07082 96 64 21 11
306 I can certainly prescribe a change of tires, but is that why you really came to see me? 1.4479 0.07235 96 65 19 12
307 And what did you learn from lying on your emissions tests? 1.4433 0.06711 97 63 25 9
308 These nightmares you're having...is It always clowns? 1.4433 0.07323 97 67 17 13
309 And whose voice is it that you hear saying you're not a smart car? 1.4421 0.06645 95 61 26 8
310 OK, you're small, but you are a smart car and you drove yourself here. Doesn't that make you feel good? 1.4421 0.06645 95 61 26 8
311 I'm just not driven like I used to be. 1.4421 0.06645 95 61 26 8
312 Yes, I can see how a fear of clowns makes your job challenging. 1.4421 0.07288 95 65 18 12
313 Elaborate on the time you asked someone for directions. 1.4421 0.06811 95 62 24 9
314 Do you think your father's history of gas guzzling affected his reaction when you came out as electric? 1.4421 0.07133 95 64 20 11
315 Let me see if I got this right: your father is from Detroit and your mother is from Silicon Valley. 1.4421 0.06811 95 62 24 9
316 Prius envy? 1.4421 0.07735 95 68 12 15
317 She left me for a stretch limo. How am I supposed to feel? 1.4421 0.06974 95 63 22 10
318 Not everyone can be a self-starter 1.4421 0.06811 95 62 24 9
319 I'm fine, really. It's just cheaper to park here. 1.4421 0.06974 95 63 22 10
320 And you say these voices keep telling to you to drive yourself? 1.4388 0.07116 98 67 19 12
321 Feeling empty? 1.4375 0.06916 96 64 22 10
322 Don't worry. Auto-erotic dreams are perfectly normal for someone your age. 1.4375 0.07226 96 66 18 12
323 I'm sorry to tell you, its an auto immune disorder. 1.4375 0.06756 96 63 24 9
324 And the voices tell you to go where? 1.4375 0.06756 96 63 24 9
325 I gotta be honest, Doc, I don't know where I'm goin' 1.4375 0.06916 96 64 22 10
326 Do you ever feel empty inside? 1.4375 0.06250 96 60 30 6
327 When did you start claiming to be a Hummer online? 1.4375 0.06756 96 63 24 9
328 Tell me more about "feeling like there's a clown inside trying to get out." 1.4375 0.07377 96 67 16 13
329 I feel like she just used me to get from A to B, y'know? 1.4375 0.06756 96 63 24 9
330 You aren't alone. Few of us understand what's really driving us. 1.4375 0.06916 96 64 22 10
331 So all those clowns make you feel funny inside? 1.4362 0.07647 94 67 13 14
332 I have a recurring nightmare about clowns 1.4362 0.07647 94 67 13 14
333 So you think your problem is size, or lack of drive? 1.4362 0.06858 94 62 23 9
334 As a confidence builder, try not coming here by bus 1.4362 0.06689 94 61 25 8
335 Don't worry. Nobody understands roundabouts. 1.4362 0.06858 94 62 23 9
336 Let go of that guilt. Lube jobs are a healthy and normal part of your life. 1.4362 0.07496 94 66 15 13
337 So tell me, when did you realize you were headed in the wrong direction. 1.4362 0.06858 94 62 23 9
338 Autoeroticism, I'd say. 1.4362 0.06689 94 61 25 8
339 I had a nocturnal emission. 1.4362 0.07341 94 65 17 12
340 How long have you had these auto-erotic fantasies? 1.4362 0.07023 94 63 21 10
341 I've kept these emissions bottled up for so long. 1.4362 0.06858 94 62 23 9
342 I feel great, but my gas pedal is often depressed. 1.4362 0.06689 94 61 25 8
343 Now tell me ... exactly how long have you wanted to be a toaster? 1.4362 0.07795 94 68 11 15
344 The term “smart car” can create unrealistic expectations. 1.4362 0.06338 94 59 29 6
345 So what brings you here? 1.4362 0.07496 94 66 15 13
346 I think you're headed for a breakdown. 1.4333 0.06897 90 59 23 8
347 Can you find your own way out? 1.4330 0.06859 97 65 22 10
348 Sometimes a gas nozzle is just a gas nozzle. 1.4330 0.07166 97 67 18 12
349 So why do you feel you always need to toot your own horn? 1.4330 0.06701 97 64 24 9
350 Remember, it's not your size, it's what you do with it. 1.4316 0.06964 95 64 21 10
351 You'll find tissues in the glove compartment. 1.4316 0.07123 95 65 19 11
352 Sounds like you have control issues. 1.4301 0.06734 93 61 24 8
353 When exactly did your fear of clowns begin? 1.4301 0.07705 93 67 12 14
354 She just doesn't turn me on like she used to. 1.4301 0.06905 93 62 22 9
355 Let's talk about the dream where you're running over pedestrians. 1.4301 0.07396 93 65 16 12
356 Electrical dysfunction is nothing to be ashamed of. 1.4301 0.06558 93 60 26 7
357 First, we need to work on figuring out what drives you. 1.4301 0.07072 93 63 20 10
358 It just feels like I took a wrong turn sonewhere along the way. 1.4301 0.06734 93 61 24 8
359 Well I think any car that can drive itself to my office and parallel park on my couch is a very smart car indeed. 1.4301 0.07072 93 63 20 10
360 So, you drove down the road not taken and then what? 1.4301 0.06734 93 61 24 8
361 Well, what used to drive you? 1.4301 0.06377 93 59 28 6
362 Relax, just because your battery is bi-polar, doesn't mean you are. 1.4301 0.07552 93 66 14 13
363 If your emissions are good, size won't be a problem 1.4301 0.07396 93 65 16 12
364 How long have you had these feelings of Prius envy? 1.4301 0.07396 93 65 16 12
365 Ma'am, I'm just here to pick you up. 1.4301 0.07236 93 64 18 11
366 Let's return to your first oil change. 1.4301 0.06734 93 61 24 8
367 Just once, I'd like to tell everybody else where to go. 1.4301 0.07072 93 63 20 10
368 Don't worry, nocturnal emissions are totally legal. 1.4301 0.06905 93 62 22 9
369 Yes, tell me more about your gas guzzling father. 1.4301 0.07396 93 65 16 12
370 And when did this fear of clowns begin? 1.4301 0.07552 93 66 14 13
371 How did you get to the 8th floor? 1.4301 0.07705 93 67 12 14
372 The consultation is complementary, but the parking is $150 an hour. 1.4270 0.07303 89 61 18 10
373 Do you think you lack drive? Or direction? 1.4255 0.07485 94 67 14 13
374 I think being zero emissions is causing you to hold too much inside. 1.4255 0.06504 94 61 26 7
375 So you say your parents were driven. How do you feel about that? 1.4239 0.07916 92 68 9 15
376 It's called Prius Envy, if you must give it a name. 1.4239 0.07609 92 66 13 13
377 The first thing I want to check is your lithium level. 1.4239 0.06952 92 62 21 9
378 Tell me more about not feeling driven. 1.4239 0.07122 92 63 19 10
379 What makes you think your concerns are pedestrian? 1.4222 0.07408 90 63 16 11
380 So how long have you self-identified as a toaster? 1.4194 0.07384 93 66 15 12
381 Frankly, I don't think you need a shrink. 1.4194 0.07540 93 67 13 13
382 I'd like to address your repressed emissions. 1.4194 0.06892 93 63 21 9
383 Perhaps a new outlet would help. 1.4194 0.06544 93 61 25 7
384 Sometimes you just need to unplug. 1.4176 0.05861 91 56 32 3
385 Let's talk about your self-control issues. 1.4176 0.07000 91 62 20 9
386 So, we're having control issues, are we? 1.4176 0.06823 91 61 22 8
387 First, I'll need your VIN. 1.4176 0.07000 91 62 20 9
388 Your uber is clearly in conflict with your id. 1.4176 0.07666 91 66 12 13
389 So, you feel as though the clowns are driving you crazy. 1.4176 0.07666 91 66 12 13
390 You are valued, regardless of what Consumer Reports says. 1.4176 0.06456 91 59 26 6
391 When did you find out your parents were gas guzzlers? 1.4176 0.06456 91 59 26 6
392 So, what brings you here today? 1.4176 0.07172 91 63 18 10
393 Let’s first rule out mechanical causes. 1.4176 0.07172 91 63 18 10
394 He called you a toaster. You showed him your headlights. Then what? 1.4176 0.07172 91 63 18 10
395 This "collision avoidance" sounds like a defense mechanism. 1.4176 0.07341 91 64 16 11
396 Sounds like Prius envy. 1.4176 0.07172 91 63 18 10
397 No, really, you need to let the child inside you come out. It's not enough to crack the window. 1.4176 0.07172 91 63 18 10
398 I wet the garage again. 1.4157 0.07112 89 61 19 9
399 I'm sorry, was that one beep or two? 1.4157 0.07632 89 64 13 12
400 It sounds to me like you know exactly where you want to be, but you just don't know how to get there. 1.4157 0.07112 89 61 19 9
401 Do you want to pay by cash, check or EZ Pass? 1.4157 0.06552 89 58 25 6
402 How long have you had these dreams about clowns? 1.4157 0.06744 89 59 23 7
403 "I'm sorry but 'That's how I roll' is not the answer to every question. 1.4157 0.07290 89 62 17 10
404 Strive for autonomy, but remember to let people in. 1.4157 0.06744 89 59 23 7
405 Can I ask you to back up a little there 1.4157 0.06744 89 59 23 7
406 Let's start with some relaxation techniques. Shutoff your headlights, release your emergency brake and slowly lower your tire pressures. 1.4157 0.06930 89 60 21 8
407 Autoerotica isn't always a bad thing. 1.4157 0.07632 89 64 13 12
408 What do you think is driving you? 1.4130 0.07108 92 64 18 10
409 It appears that you may be dealing with a control issue. 1.4130 0.06764 92 62 22 8
410 Before we begin, I'm obligated to remind you that the meter is running. 1.4130 0.06938 92 63 20 9
411 So, you no longer have the drive? 1.4130 0.07275 92 65 16 11
412 I understand you're feeling used. 1.4130 0.06585 92 61 24 7
413 I'm just not driven. 1.4130 0.07275 92 65 16 11
414 How long have you had this shiftless feeling? 1.4130 0.06764 92 62 22 8
415 Think back to when you were just a little search engine... 1.4111 0.07724 90 66 11 13
416 You're not the first self-driving car to experience road rage. 1.4111 0.06869 90 61 21 8
417 What's the problem? I lot of people hate clowns. 1.4111 0.07724 90 66 11 13
418 Today I'd like to try some reverse psychology. 1.4111 0.06495 90 59 25 6
419 Ignore them—you look nothing like a toaster. 1.4111 0.07048 90 62 19 9
420 When did you first feel lost? 1.4111 0.07223 90 63 17 10
421 Tell me about your relationship with your driver 1.4111 0.07394 90 64 15 11
422 I think you can find your way out. 1.4111 0.07223 90 63 17 10
423 So, it sounds like you are feeling like you really need to shift gears. 1.4111 0.07048 90 62 19 9
424 So, when did you become self driven? 1.4111 0.07223 90 63 17 10
425 And when did you first realize you were afraid of clowns? 1.4111 0.07048 90 62 19 9
426 Don't take it personally; kicking tires is just something people do. 1.4111 0.06684 90 60 23 7
427 What did we say about honking? Use your words. 1.4111 0.07223 90 63 17 10
428 'Piston envy is a common stage.' 1.4111 0.06869 90 61 21 8
429 It's OK to toot your own horn! 1.4111 0.06684 90 60 23 7
430 Let's begin by talking about those blind spots. 1.4111 0.07048 90 62 19 9
431 So, tell me when you first noticed your driver was missing. 1.4111 0.07394 90 64 15 11
432 You feel empty...driven. 1.4045 0.07447 89 64 14 11
433 My professional opinion? You're driving yourself crazy. 1.4045 0.06727 89 60 22 7
434 Tell me more about how you feel people are taking you for a ride. 1.4045 0.06727 89 60 22 7
435 Please stop saying that you know where my questions are going. 1.4045 0.07096 89 62 18 9
436 So when did your fear of clowns first occur? 1.4045 0.07096 89 62 18 9
437 I get car sick. 1.4045 0.07096 89 62 18 9
438 What makes you think he'll leave you for another model? 1.4045 0.06727 89 60 22 7
439 So you were manufactured as a car,but you identify as a toaster? 1.4045 0.07274 89 63 16 10
440 How long have you been taking different people home every night? 1.4045 0.07617 89 65 12 12
441 Doctor, my problem is I no longer feel driven. 1.4045 0.06534 89 59 24 6
442 Face it, Porsche's gone. She was out of your league anyway. 1.4045 0.06336 89 58 26 5
443 And when did you first get this feeling that you have an autoimmune disease? 1.4045 0.07274 89 63 16 10
444 "Don't belittle yourself. You ARE a Smart Car....... 1.4045 0.06914 89 61 20 8
445 I sense that you are honking on the inside. 1.4045 0.06534 89 59 24 6
446 If you’re not in control of where you’re going, then no one is. 1.4045 0.06914 89 61 20 8
447 I really don't think you should take it personally when they kick your tires. 1.4045 0.07096 89 62 18 9
448 You're suffering from Prius envy. 1.4045 0.07274 89 63 16 10
449 Yes, what you call "Googling yourself" is autoerotic. 1.4045 0.07274 89 63 16 10
450 How did you feel when you found out you weren't actually born in Detroit? 1.4045 0.06914 89 61 20 8
451 Tell me about your hood, child. 1.4045 0.07617 89 65 12 12
452 It's okay to be high maintenance. 1.4045 0.06914 89 61 20 8
453 My initial charge is $250 for the first hour, plus $50 for each additional 1/5 of an hour. 1.4045 0.07096 89 62 18 9
454 These "voices inside you"...are they A.M. or F.M.? 1.4045 0.07617 89 65 12 12
455 So you're not feeling driven? 1.4045 0.07096 89 62 18 9
456 Tell the circumstances that led to your first breakdown. 1.4045 0.06914 89 61 20 8
457 Let's begin. What can you tell me about what drove you here? 1.4045 0.07096 89 62 18 9
458 You say you're here because of an irrational fear of catching an auto-immune disease? 1.4045 0.06534 89 59 24 6
459 So your main problem is a lack of drive? 1.4045 0.06727 89 60 22 7
460 What makes you think your father was a toaster? 1.4045 0.07447 89 64 14 11
461 I don't know.....I just seem to have lost my sense of direction. 1.4045 0.06914 89 61 20 8
462 Some days you're the windshield, some days you're the bug. 1.4045 0.07617 89 65 12 12
463 Do you fear autonomy? 1.4045 0.07096 89 62 18 9
464 When did you first notice that you were losing your drive? 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
465 I just feel like I've lost all my drive. 1.4023 0.07212 87 61 17 9
466 I am self-driving, but my owner just refuses to give up control. 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
467 "After losing your driver it is only natural to grieve". 1.4023 0.07212 87 61 17 9
468 So Freud would have called it Prius envy? 1.4023 0.07395 87 62 15 10
469 I'm not sure what we can do about your Prius envy 1.4023 0.07748 87 64 11 12
470 Let's get past the small stuff. I'd appreciate it if you could park facing me. 1.4023 0.07025 87 60 19 8
471 To begin with, just what makes you think you're so Smart? 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
472 I can't help you if you won't let me in. 1.4023 0.06633 87 58 23 6
473 Tell me about how you got here. 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
474 So how long have you had this obsession with auto-eroticism? 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
475 It's perfectly normal to have gas problems. 1.4023 0.07212 87 61 17 9
476 Tell me more about your breakdown on 43rd Street. 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
477 So this week I want you to try going one day without maps. 1.4023 0.06633 87 58 23 6
478 I feel people are just using me. 1.4023 0.07395 87 62 15 10
479 i think you're having control issues 1.4023 0.06633 87 58 23 6
480 ..and that's when I found out I was adopted, and my real mother is a toaster. 1.4023 0.07212 87 61 17 9
481 I would say you have a case of piston envy. 1.4023 0.07748 87 64 11 12
482 It's sounds like you feel like nothing is driving you. 1.4023 0.07025 87 60 19 8
483 Well, we've come to the end of our session. Do you need your parking validated? 1.4023 0.07212 87 61 17 9
484 You know, being self driven doesn't mean you can't feel lost. 1.4023 0.07395 87 62 15 10
485 I give up. How many clowns can you hold? 1.4023 0.07574 87 63 13 11
486 My meter's running, too, you know. 1.4023 0.07025 87 60 19 8
487 And how many clowns were there? 1.4023 0.07025 87 60 19 8
488 You're very self-driven 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
489 By now you know you can't carry a lot of excess baggage. 1.4023 0.07212 87 61 17 9
490 Let's begin with your bad dreams. How many clowns are jumping out of you? 1.4023 0.07395 87 62 15 10
491 Focus less on being self-driving, and more on being self-driven 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
492 Not the clown car dream again? 1.4023 0.07025 87 60 19 8
493 Why do you say 'I don't feel driven anymore'? 1.4023 0.06428 87 57 25 5
494 At what point did you see yourself as the little engine that couldn't? 1.4023 0.07025 87 60 19 8
495 Where do you think this need to be controlled is coming from? 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
496 Would you describe your parents as driven? 1.4023 0.07212 87 61 17 9
497 Let me guess – you feel like your life is on auto-pilot. 1.4023 0.07025 87 60 19 8
498 Let's start with how you got here. 1.4023 0.07395 87 62 15 10
499 It sounds like you're driving yourself crazy. 1.4023 0.06633 87 58 23 6
500 How long have you been fueling this way? 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
501 Tell me more about feeling empty inside. 1.4023 0.06832 87 59 21 7
502 Are you sure it's gas? 1.3977 0.06573 88 59 23 6
503 You could've had a V8. 1.3977 0.07501 88 64 13 11
504 And would you describe yourself as "driven"? 1.3977 0.07145 88 62 17 9
505 Think of it as 'parkability', not 'size matters'. 1.3977 0.06959 88 61 19 8
506 Only you can change your direction. 1.3977 0.06371 88 58 25 5
507 Why do you feel you need everyone to think you are smart? 1.3977 0.07145 88 62 17 9
508 Mechanical reassignment as a toaster involves many issues. Naturally, I'm here to counsel with you and help clarify the correct path for expressing your true self. 1.3956 0.06967 91 64 18 9
509 What do you mean your meter is running? 1.3953 0.07807 86 64 10 12
510 Take a vacation. Unplug. Recharge. 1.3953 0.06466 86 57 24 5
511 Growing up, my dad was on the road a lot. 1.3953 0.06674 86 58 22 6
512 Was it the amount of clowns inside you, or that everyone just stood and watched? 1.3953 0.07981 86 65 8 13
513 I think I'm driving myself crazy. 1.3953 0.06466 86 57 24 5
514 I think if you're ever going to be truly happy, you'll need to focus less on your crash safety issues, and focus more on your wonderful fuel efficiency, and ability to make people laugh. 1.3953 0.07072 86 60 18 8
515 We all wish we were in a better cartoon. 1.3953 0.07263 86 61 16 9
516 It's normal to get turned on when you're plugged in. 1.3953 0.06876 86 59 20 7
517 I hear you saying that sometimes you don't know which way to turn. 1.3953 0.07072 86 60 18 8
518 Yes , we're on the meter 1.3953 0.06876 86 59 20 7
519 What drives you? 1.3953 0.07263 86 61 16 9
520 And how often do you have this dream of plowing into a crowd of computer programmers? 1.3953 0.07807 86 64 10 12
521 "Normally I just do nervous breakdowns". 1.3953 0.07072 86 60 18 8
522 I think you need direction. 1.3953 0.06876 86 59 20 7
523 So you feel guilty passing gas? 1.3953 0.06876 86 59 20 7
524 Why do you think your 'search engine' light keeps coming on? 1.3953 0.06674 86 58 22 6
525 How long have you felt that you lacked direction? 1.3953 0.06876 86 59 20 7
526 That will be $100 for the first five minutes, and then $10 for each additional minute. 1.3953 0.07263 86 61 16 9
527 2 honks for yes, 1 honk for no 1.3953 0.06876 86 59 20 7
528 Well you obviously know what's troubling you -- I mean, you're clearly a Smart Car. 1.3953 0.06674 86 58 22 6
529 When did you first stop having fahrvergnügen? 1.3953 0.07449 86 62 14 10
530 But you are a clown car. 1.3953 0.07263 86 61 16 9
531 Autoerotic fantasies are quite normal in a self-driving car. 1.3953 0.07807 86 64 10 12
532 When did you first experience this loss of drive? 1.3953 0.06876 86 59 20 7
533 The first group session of clown therapy is always a bit awkward 1.3953 0.07807 86 64 10 12
534 So, did you have any trouble finding the place? 1.3953 0.07263 86 61 16 9
535 It's just that everyone around me is so driven. 1.3953 0.07807 86 64 10 12
536 I just feel like my life has already been mapped out for me. 1.3953 0.06466 86 57 24 5
537 Maybe you just can't go there. 1.3953 0.07072 86 60 18 8
538 You've been driving yourself crazy. 1.3953 0.07263 86 61 16 9
539 You are an autonomous self-driving car, an autodidactic autopilot. It is only natural to feel autoerotic, but you should draw the line at autotheism. 1.3953 0.07807 86 64 10 12
540 Tell me about what turns you on. 1.3953 0.07449 86 62 14 10
541 I think with a few more sessions we can get you turned around. 1.3933 0.06707 89 61 21 7
542 Beyond intimacy and fuel efficiency, are there other issues you need to discuss? 1.3933 0.06895 89 62 19 8
543 And why do you want to be a Crossover? 1.3908 0.07005 87 61 18 8
544 My life feels like it's on autopilot. 1.3908 0.07377 87 63 14 10
545 Sometimes it can be helpful to think about what it is that drives you... 1.3908 0.06811 87 60 20 7
546 Your service plan allows only two more visits. I'm sorry. 1.3908 0.06195 87 57 26 4
547 It's normal to feel directionless at times 1.3908 0.06612 87 59 22 6
548 Would you describe yourself as driven? 1.3908 0.06811 87 60 20 7
549 Tell me what keeps you up idling at night. 1.3882 0.06714 85 58 21 6
550 You have to stop driving yourself so hard 1.3882 0.06714 85 58 21 6
551 Next week let's work on being more self-driven. 1.3882 0.07119 85 60 17 8
552 I drive myself crazy. 1.3882 0.07119 85 60 17 8
553 Tell me more about your gas problem. 1.3882 0.06714 85 58 21 6
554 You say you have Prius envy? 1.3882 0.07502 85 62 13 10
555 At your age, it's perfectly normal to experience occasional feelings of autoeroticism. 1.3882 0.07313 85 61 15 9
556 One thing I have never lacked is motivation, I've always been completely self-driven 1.3882 0.06920 85 59 19 7
557 Prius envy, plain and simple. 1.3882 0.06920 85 59 19 7
558 I don't seem to be getting where I want to go 1.3882 0.06920 85 59 19 7
559 You have to understand that just because you are a smart car you do not always make wise decisions. 1.3882 0.07313 85 61 15 9
560 She left you for a stretch limo? 1.3882 0.06920 85 59 19 7
561 Do you know the warning lights for depression? 1.3882 0.07119 85 60 17 8
562 Why don't you let someone else take control for a change? 1.3882 0.06920 85 59 19 7
563 Just because you have a short wheelbase, doesn't mean you're inadequate. 1.3882 0.07119 85 60 17 8
564 I feel like I've been going through life on autopilot 1.3882 0.06502 85 57 23 5
565 When did you start having these breakdowns? 1.3882 0.06920 85 59 19 7
566 You don't always need to be so self-driven. 1.3882 0.07313 85 61 15 9
567 She treats me like a toy. 1.3882 0.07313 85 61 15 9
568 I guess, you won't need your parking validated. 1.3882 0.07502 85 62 13 10
569 It sounds like you're sending all the wrong signals. 1.3882 0.06502 85 57 23 5
570 Perhaps they're laughing with you. 1.3882 0.07119 85 60 17 8
571 Say more about these nocturnal emissions. 1.3882 0.07119 85 60 17 8
572 I just don't know where I'm going anymore. 1.3882 0.06714 85 58 21 6
573 Frankly, your issues are all pedestrian. 1.3882 0.06714 85 58 21 6
574 When did you first start having these feelings that no one was in charge 1.3882 0.07119 85 60 17 8
575 Why don't you let me steer the conversation? 1.3882 0.06920 85 59 19 7
576 Doc, I don't know which way to turn 1.3882 0.07313 85 61 15 9
577 "No worries. It's supposed to last longer than four hours." . 1.3882 0.07502 85 62 13 10
578 As green as your life is, an occasional nocturnal emission is perfectly normal. 1.3882 0.07119 85 60 17 8
579 These nocturnal emissions--when did they begin? 1.3882 0.06502 85 57 23 5
580 This is an unloading zone. 1.3882 0.07313 85 61 15 9
581 There is just so much pressure these days to be self-driven. 1.3882 0.06920 85 59 19 7
582 It's okay to be driven. 1.3882 0.06920 85 59 19 7
583 It's natural to feel empty at times. 1.3882 0.06283 85 56 25 4
584 I know it's hard, but you can't go around avoiding everyone 1.3882 0.06920 85 59 19 7
585 It's not uncommon for near-death accidents to result in an auto-body experience. 1.3882 0.07119 85 60 17 8
586 Sometimes I just feel the need for someone else to be in control. 1.3882 0.06714 85 58 21 6
587 I just can't stop looking in the rear view mirror. 1.3882 0.07502 85 62 13 10
588 Many women feel size doesn't matter at all. 1.3837 0.07242 86 62 15 9
589 We need to talk about your control issues. 1.3837 0.06442 86 58 23 5
590 You seem to have control issues. 1.3837 0.06651 86 59 21 6
591 Problems with your dipstick are very common at your age. 1.3837 0.07242 86 62 15 9
592 Well, I think we can rule out Prius envy. 1.3837 0.07428 86 63 13 10
593 So how long have you been autoerotic? 1.3837 0.07242 86 62 15 9
594 take your time....the meter's running.... 1.3820 0.06492 89 61 22 6
595 You feel your life lacks direction? 1.3820 0.06292 89 60 24 5
596 So, tell me, who pushes your buttons? 1.3810 0.06539 84 57 22 5
597 From what I'm hearing, you seem to resent always being called the "smart car" and never the "pretty car". 1.3810 0.06964 84 59 18 7
598 You have Car Pool Tunnel Syndrome, not uncommon for a commuter car. 1.3810 0.07364 84 61 14 9
599 It's ok to be smart. 1.3810 0.06964 84 59 18 7
600 That doesn't make you a control freak. 1.3810 0.07744 84 63 10 11
601 When I said I was going to charge you, I didn't mean....oh, dear.... 1.3810 0.06539 84 57 22 5
602 You don't feel you need someone to turn you on? 1.3810 0.06539 84 57 22 5
603 I don't know, Doc... I guess I figured you knew what it's like to carry everyone else's baggage. 1.3810 0.07556 84 62 12 10
604 Every time I think we are getting somewhere she slams on the brakes. 1.3810 0.06755 84 58 20 6
605 So your husband left you for a newer model? 1.3810 0.07167 84 60 16 8
606 Sorry, I don't validate. 1.3810 0.07364 84 61 14 9
607 You're still smart; you've just taken some wrong turns. 1.3810 0.06316 84 56 24 4
608 You know, in most parts of the world you would be considered average sized. 1.3810 0.06755 84 58 20 6
609 You should take some time off to recharge your battery. 1.3810 0.06539 84 57 22 5
610 I don't take insurance, but there's a discount if you have AAA. 1.3810 0.06755 84 58 20 6
611 We need to work on your control issues. 1.3810 0.06755 84 58 20 6
612 Remember, you're not 'Driverless', you're 'Self-driving'. 1.3810 0.07744 84 63 10 11
613 Sure, you have drive. What about empathy? 1.3810 0.07364 84 61 14 9
614 Your ego and uber-ego are in conflict. 1.3810 0.07167 84 60 16 8
615 Dig deeper. Who's in the driver's seat? 1.3810 0.07364 84 61 14 9
616 Yes, but what really drives you? 1.3810 0.06755 84 58 20 6
617 When did you first experience Prius envy? 1.3810 0.07744 84 63 10 11
618 Nice parking job. 1.3810 0.07167 84 60 16 8
619 I'm sure your driver misses you as well. 1.3810 0.06964 84 59 18 7
620 In your case, autoeroticism is perfectly normal. 1.3810 0.06964 84 59 18 7
621 I suggest you just take some time off to recharge your batteries. 1.3810 0.06539 84 57 22 5
622 Hummer fantasies are nothing to be ashamed of. 1.3810 0.06964 84 59 18 7
623 I know Bruce Jenner did it, but he didn't want to be a truck. 1.3810 0.06964 84 59 18 7
624 Why do YOU think your air bags are inflating too soon? 1.3810 0.07167 84 60 16 8
625 It's actually quite common to experience some Prius envy. 1.3793 0.06789 87 61 19 7
626 Why do you feel you have difficulty accommodating people? 1.3765 0.07096 85 61 16 8
627 I can never see my gas tank as half full, you know? 1.3765 0.07291 85 62 14 9
628 If I were a Jungian I'd call it Prius envy. 1.3765 0.06690 85 59 20 6
629 Frankly, I think you're being Uber sensitive. 1.3765 0.06690 85 59 20 6
630 First things first, will this be billed to your auto or health plan? 1.3765 0.07096 85 61 16 8
631 You'll be fine. You'd fit in anywhere. 1.3765 0.06690 85 59 20 6
632 What do you think having a stick shift will give you that you don't already have now? 1.3750 0.06528 88 61 21 6
633 Small tires don't always mean a small tailpipe. 1.3735 0.07415 83 61 13 9
634 I have emissional problems. 1.3735 0.07214 83 60 15 8
635 Interesting... I think that what you just did there is a perfect example of a Ford-ian slip. 1.3735 0.06347 83 56 23 4
636 I just feel like I need a brake. 1.3735 0.06795 83 58 19 6
637 Every night I dream that I go to work and I'm not wearing any tires. 1.3735 0.06575 83 57 21 5
638 Don't you think it's time you started taking responsibility for your actions? 1.3735 0.07008 83 59 17 7
639 So, tell me what brings you here besides Google maps? 1.3735 0.07611 83 62 11 10
640 Perhaps you should stop googling yourself. 1.3735 0.07008 83 59 17 7
641 Drive me here, drive me there, I think they are all driving me crazy. 1.3735 0.07611 83 62 11 10
642 You don't get turned on much anymore? 1.3735 0.06795 83 58 19 6
643 Now, back up a minute! 1.3735 0.07008 83 59 17 7
644 Tell me about your first passenger. 1.3735 0.06575 83 57 21 5
645 I think you are just being uber sensitive. 1.3735 0.07008 83 59 17 7
646 I'm referring you to a specialist in autoeroticism. 1.3735 0.07008 83 59 17 7
647 I'm sensing a lot of road rage. 1.3735 0.07008 83 59 17 7
648 I'm not only self-driving, I'm also self-loathing. 1.3735 0.07008 83 59 17 7
649 Let's get down to what really drives you. 1.3735 0.07611 83 62 11 10
650 It's really less about your ego and more about your über-ego. 1.3735 0.07214 83 60 15 8
651 Beeping your own horn gets you the wrong type of attention. 1.3735 0.06575 83 57 21 5
652 Tell me some more about your Uber ego. 1.3735 0.07008 83 59 17 7
653 Sometimes I think to myself, "Jesus, take the wheel." 1.3735 0.07214 83 60 15 8
654 Gary, a check-engine light can mean so many things. 1.3735 0.07415 83 61 13 9
655 No, you don't have to be driven to succeed 1.3735 0.07008 83 59 17 7
656 And I take it you didn't think you needed to stop and ask for directions? 1.3690 0.06511 84 58 21 5
657 I have Prius envy 1.3690 0.07533 84 63 11 10
658 Happiness is a journey, not a destination... 1.3690 0.06728 84 59 19 6
659 Where does the voice inside you tell you to go? 1.3690 0.07340 84 62 13 9
660 I'm driving myself crazy. 1.3659 0.07665 82 62 10 10
661 Next week, bring in the clowns. 1.3659 0.07466 82 61 12 9
662 When we're done with this session can you give me a lift? 1.3659 0.06610 82 57 20 5
663 You can't live life on Autopilot 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
664 Four recalls? 1.3659 0.07051 82 59 16 7
665 I just don't feel driven. 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
666 Do you have any idea the pressure of being labeled "Smart" all your life? 1.3659 0.07665 82 62 10 10
667 How do you know your owner is Ubering other cars? 1.3659 0.07466 82 61 12 9
668 It sounds like textbook Prius envy. 1.3659 0.07051 82 59 16 7
669 "Self-driving needn't be shameful.' 1.3659 0.06610 82 57 20 5
670 And your tires. Are they under any kind of pressure? 1.3659 0.07051 82 59 16 7
671 You can have your parking validated when you leave. 1.3659 0.07262 82 60 14 8
672 Sorry, I can't validate your parking. 1.3659 0.07262 82 60 14 8
673 Really, you've been driving yourself too hard. 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
674 Do you have any concept of where you are going? 1.3659 0.07466 82 61 12 9
675 Just don't let anyone try to control you. 1.3659 0.07051 82 59 16 7
676 I just always feel like I'm being followed. 1.3659 0.07051 82 59 16 7
677 You need direction 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
678 The dream usually ends with me running an Amazon driver into a ditch. 1.3659 0.07262 82 60 14 8
679 Even though you have the world's largest search engine? 1.3659 0.07859 82 63 8 11
680 Tell me about it or not; the meter's running either way. 1.3659 0.06610 82 57 20 5
681 Don't worry. I am a member of both the AMA and the AAA. 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
682 Where do you really want to go? 1.3659 0.07262 82 60 14 8
683 So when did you discover that you're not a smart car? 1.3659 0.07262 82 60 14 8
684 But I don't FEEL smart. 1.3659 0.07466 82 61 12 9
685 And when did these episodes of auto eroticism start? 1.3659 0.06379 82 56 22 4
686 Just face it. You can't always go your own way. 1.3659 0.07051 82 59 16 7
687 Being smart doesn't make you popular. Trust me, I know. 1.3659 0.07051 82 59 16 7
688 I'm driving myself crazy, Doc. 1.3659 0.07665 82 62 10 10
689 You shouldn't be too concerned. Many cars your age have uncontrolled emissions from time to time. 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
690 I don't know Doc, I just don't feel driven. 1.3659 0.06379 82 56 22 4
691 For future reference, we do validate parking. 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
692 I'm sorry we don't administer electric shock therapy any longer. 1.3659 0.06379 82 56 22 4
693 well, i'll see you in another five thousand miles. 1.3659 0.06138 82 55 24 3
694 Do you have any hobbies besides driving? 1.3659 0.06610 82 57 20 5
695 Sometimes I think I'm just driving myself crazy. 1.3659 0.07665 82 62 10 10
696 And do you feel that you're not driven enough? 1.3659 0.07262 82 60 14 8
697 What do you think drives you? 1.3659 0.06610 82 57 20 5
698 Tell me more about your checkered past 1.3659 0.07262 82 60 14 8
699 And how long have you dreamed you were a toaster? 1.3659 0.07859 82 63 8 11
700 Before I ask you how that made you feel, I need to advise you we've hit peak hours and my rate has increased by 2.2x. 1.3659 0.07859 82 63 8 11
701 Before we start - are you sure you don't have an oil leak? 1.3659 0.07665 82 62 10 10
702 You say you don't feel driven any more. 1.3659 0.06610 82 57 20 5
703 Sorry, I can't hear you when your window is up. 1.3659 0.07466 82 61 12 9
704 And how did having a gas-guzzling mother make you feel? 1.3659 0.07466 82 61 12 9
705 I just think I'm meant to do something other than deliver pizza. 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
706 Would you say you are driving yourself to distraction? 1.3659 0.07466 82 61 12 9
707 Perhaps he doesn't caress your steering wheel anymore because you don't have a steering wheel anymore. 1.3659 0.07262 82 60 14 8
708 You have control issues. 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
709 Missing NPR's 'Car Talk' is not abnormal. 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
710 The voices in your head would go away if you just shut off the radio. 1.3659 0.07051 82 59 16 7
711 You have to take time for yourself and recharge. 1.3659 0.06834 82 58 18 6
712 So let me get this straight, you want me to charge you? 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
713 At some point, we all have to learn to navigate the world on our own. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
714 I'm just not feeling driven anymore 1.3625 0.07387 80 59 13 8
715 First, tell me how you got here. 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
716 That's the end of our session, now go play in traffic 1.3625 0.06474 80 55 21 4
717 You need to compensate for your feelings of inadequacy on the highway by focusing on your ability to squeeze into any parking space. 1.3625 0.06714 80 56 19 5
718 First of all, you're facing the wrong way. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
719 So, I understand you have issues of self control. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
720 And how did it make you feel, as a child, to be the 'smart car' in your class? 1.3625 0.07387 80 59 13 8
721 No, I don't charge by the mile. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
722 Howard, there is more to life than getting from zero to 60 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
723 If you could turn around we can get started. 1.3625 0.06474 80 55 21 4
724 Then what did he do after he rear-ended you? 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
725 And how does it make you feel, when they call you "mini"? 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
726 How long have you lacked any drive? 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
727 I'm sorry, we don't accept E-ZPass. 1.3625 0.06714 80 56 19 5
728 Of course you may plug in, but that will be an additional charge. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
729 What I hear you saying is that you don't feel like a smart car. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
730 Perhaps we should talk about performance rather than size. 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
731 Size is not what matters. I'm sure you give great mileage. 1.3625 0.07387 80 59 13 8
732 I know it’s your job, but you can’t keep everything locked inside. 1.3625 0.07598 80 60 11 9
733 I don't do validation. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
734 Sometimes you're the driver, sometimes you're being driven. That's life. 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
735 So you feel like there's nothing driving you anymore 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
736 Maybe you should ask your mother if she ever even met Herbie? 1.3625 0.06714 80 56 19 5
737 I can help only if the gasket you blew is metaphorical. 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
738 You say you need a charge, how about $200 per hour. 1.3625 0.07387 80 59 13 8
739 I’m afraid you have confused self-driving with self-determination. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
740 Hmm. . . and how did you feel that first time you saw the smoke coming out of your rear end? 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
741 I don't think that Donald Trump means to deport cars built in Mexico, but you never know. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
742 Our time is up for today, but for a quarter we could go another 15 minutes. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
743 So whose driving you crazy this week? 1.3625 0.07598 80 60 11 9
744 So tell me what brings you here 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
745 What are you driving at? 1.3625 0.06225 80 54 23 3
746 I think the question you have to answer is: "Where do you want to go?" 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
747 Honk twice if I'm getting too personal. 1.3625 0.06714 80 56 19 5
748 In your case, it's completely normal to not feel driven. 1.3625 0.06714 80 56 19 5
749 Of course, in your case, the diagnosis would not be bi-polar, but hybrid. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
750 My mother wanted a limo. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
751 So you're convinced your mother was a toaster. Let's explore that. 1.3625 0.07387 80 59 13 8
752 Can you recall your worst recall? 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
753 How long have people been driving you crazy? 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
754 I don't think there's any reason that you should be ashamed to have a three-prong adapter. 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
755 You know, a lot of drivers prefer smaller cars. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
756 I know you're upset, but we can't go down that road again. 1.3625 0.06714 80 56 19 5
757 It's perfectly normal to change gears in clutch situations. 1.3625 0.06714 80 56 19 5
758 I have trouble getting started. 1.3625 0.07598 80 60 11 9
759 Where would you LIKE to go? 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
760 Trans, hybrid... you have to let go of labels. 1.3625 0.07387 80 59 13 8
761 Don't worry - everyone thinks their charger plug is too small. 1.3625 0.07598 80 60 11 9
762 When did you first feel you were driving yourself crazy? 1.3625 0.06225 80 54 23 3
763 So you're worried that he is going to trade you in for a younger model? 1.3625 0.07598 80 60 11 9
764 So tell me, were both your parents gas-guzzlers? 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
765 So tell me Mr. Ferrari, when did you realize you were adopted? 1.3625 0.07804 80 61 9 10
766 Your issues indicate a classic autoimmune disorder. 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
767 You can do this on your own. 1.3625 0.06714 80 56 19 5
768 "I know this is emotional for you but please try to use your wipers as I am low on tissues". 1.3625 0.07387 80 59 13 8
769 It's just a motor reflex 1.3625 0.06225 80 54 23 3
770 Would it be so bad if you actually were the smartest car in the room? 1.3625 0.06714 80 56 19 5
771 and when did you first notice there was no driver? 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
772 No, I cannot validate your parking. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
773 I can drive myself; I can park myself; I get 85 miles per gallon, but no one fits inside. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
774 You needn’t blush, I’ve seen small charging cords before. 1.3625 0.07170 80 58 15 7
775 It should seem obvious, but you're driving yourself crazy. 1.3625 0.07598 80 60 11 9
776 and why do you resent people telling you where to go? 1.3625 0.07387 80 59 13 8
777 Yes, car pool tunnel syndrome is real, and I can help. 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
778 You don't feel remotely connected to anything? 1.3625 0.06945 80 57 17 6
779 Of course you're smart enough. 1.3625 0.07387 80 59 13 8
780 You look exhausted. 1.3614 0.06980 83 60 16 7
781 Yeah, well I guess 'self-driving' isn't the same as 'self-aware'. 1.3614 0.06766 83 59 18 6
782 No, self-driving doesn't mean you are narcissistic. 1.3614 0.06980 83 60 16 7
783 It's not you, nocturnal emissions are standard for your model. 1.3614 0.07187 83 61 14 8
784 We all miss a turn or two in life--let it go. 1.3614 0.07187 83 61 14 8
785 Well actually, size matters 1.3580 0.07095 81 59 15 7
786 So you feel you're missing a driving force in your life? 1.3580 0.07095 81 59 15 7
787 No, we don't validate for the time parked here. 1.3580 0.06645 81 57 19 5
788 I've been driving myself crazy, Doc 1.3580 0.07720 81 62 9 10
789 Is it all clowns or just a lot of clowns in one place? 1.3580 0.07309 81 60 13 8
790 Many women actually prefer a smaller trunk. 1.3580 0.07309 81 60 13 8
791 Not everyone needs to be driven to succeed. 1.3580 0.06645 81 57 19 5
792 I think you're just looking to be validated. 1.3580 0.07309 81 60 13 8
793 Lets talk more about your auto-erotic behaviour 1.3580 0.07309 81 60 13 8
794 As much as I'd like to go for a ride with you, I think that would be unethical. 1.3580 0.07309 81 60 13 8
795 Tell me what drives you. 1.3580 0.07095 81 59 15 7
796 So you claim to remember the assembly line-tell me about that. 1.3580 0.06874 81 58 17 6
797 So why is it you feel smarter than the other cars? 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
798 You seem Uber upset. 1.3544 0.07652 79 60 10 9
799 Have you considered slowing down? 1.3544 0.06251 79 54 22 3
800 I think you're cute too but it's unethical to ride in my patients. 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
801 Sometimes people drive me crazy! 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
802 I wish I had more drive. 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
803 You have to own your wrong turns and stop blaming your programming. 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
804 Just because they don't touch your steering wheel doesn't mean you're unattractive. 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
805 I have Uber Problems. 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
806 Let's talk more about your autoerotic fantasies. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
807 It hurts so much when they ask, "what car will you be when you grow up?" 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
808 I've lost my will to drive. 1.3544 0.06505 79 55 20 4
809 Recalling you doesn't necessarily mean they don't like you. 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
810 Remember, if one door closes another opens. 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
811 How long have you had this fear of clowns? 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
812 What makes you think your tailpipe is small? 1.3544 0.07652 79 60 10 9
813 It sounds like you're having a midsize crisis. 1.3544 0.06986 79 57 16 6
814 I lack self-control. Is that a problem? 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
815 So you were 9 when you began thinking your father was a gas guzzler.. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
816 When did your self control issues begin? 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
817 Dad was a 1973 Cadillac Fleetwood. Mom, a '75 Chrysler Imperial. I think I'm adopted. 1.3544 0.07652 79 60 10 9
818 You've never felt the least bit driven? 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
819 Sometimes I feel like I have no drive. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
820 Do you always feel the need to be in control? 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
821 So you self-identify as a 4 door? 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
822 Tell me more about what drives you. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
823 If you keep going down this road you’re going to drive yourself crazy. 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
824 Google says I can do it on my own, but I just don't feel like I have the drive. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
825 You would not imagine what people do when they do not have to drive 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
826 Maybe you should stop driving yourself so hard. 1.3544 0.06986 79 57 16 6
827 And on top of all that, I haven't been honked in months. 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
828 Would I trust you with my life in heavy traffic? Oh look, our times up! 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
829 I don't know what I did to drive him away... 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
830 Yes there are many cars out there with bigger dipsticks, but so what? 1.3544 0.07652 79 60 10 9
831 You are not depressed, your batteries are too low. 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
832 You must accept being self-driven. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
833 You're not small. You're compact. 1.3544 0.06251 79 54 22 3
834 So your dad said that you were caused by an accident? 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
835 Traffic makes me really horny. 1.3544 0.07652 79 60 10 9
836 I don't know, doc. I look around and I feel like everyone else is so much more driven than I am. 1.3544 0.06986 79 57 16 6
837 So they say "you're in the driver's seat" and then they question my every move. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
838 I'm afraid I have never seen so severe a case of Prius envy. 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
839 I'm a smart car, I know I'm a smart car... 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
840 When did you become concerned you were driving yourself too hard? 1.3544 0.06251 79 54 22 3
841 Tell me more about your lack of drive. 1.3544 0.06505 79 55 20 4
842 I feel like I need a brake. 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
843 I'm thinking those voices you hear could be Sirius. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
844 When did you first develop the delusion that you were a toaster and not a car? 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
845 Have you considered letting someone else take the wheel? 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
846 Let's talk about the urge to be self-driven. 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
847 Tell me more about your fear of 18-wheelers. 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
848 My life seems to be on cruise control. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
849 When did you realize you had trouble opening up to people? 1.3544 0.07652 79 60 10 9
850 Redirecting your desires is natural. It's called 'transmission.' 1.3544 0.06986 79 57 16 6
851 Don't despair. Many of my patients feel that they are trapped in the wrong body. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
852 So, what kind of love life did you expect with no back seat? 1.3544 0.06986 79 57 16 6
853 I feel I'm not in control of where I want to go... 1.3544 0.06505 79 55 20 4
854 Frankly, I would call this an uber-reaction. 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
855 How long have you felt this lack of direction? 1.3544 0.06750 79 56 18 5
856 I charge per person, how many of you clowns you got in there? 1.3544 0.07436 79 59 12 8
857 Well, if you hate being stuffed with clowns, then it's time to take a long hard look at why you work for the circus in the first place. 1.3544 0.07215 79 58 14 7
858 Buying fuzzy dice will only remind you of him. 1.3544 0.06986 79 57 16 6
859 We've actually been seeing a lot of self-driving cars with abandonment issues lately. 1.3500 0.06439 80 56 20 4
860 Tell me more about the nightmare you had, the one about nocturnal emissions. 1.3500 0.06913 80 58 16 6
861 Just getting here is a big step. 1.3500 0.07138 80 59 14 7
862 Forgot to ask, do you need validation? 1.3500 0.06913 80 58 16 6
863 I just don't think I'm that smart. 1.3500 0.06913 80 58 16 6
864 It feels like I'm on auto-pilot most of the time. 1.3500 0.07138 80 59 14 7
865 And now you feel you've been violated by these clowns. 1.3500 0.07138 80 59 14 7
866 How old were you when your parents finally told you you weren't a Porsche? 1.3500 0.07568 80 61 10 9
867 My meter is running, whether you say anything, or not. 1.3500 0.07356 80 60 12 8
868 Sorry, I don't take Geico. 1.3500 0.06913 80 58 16 6
869 When did you first dream that your mother was a Beetle? 1.3500 0.06913 80 58 16 6
870 So tell me about your performance anxiety... 1.3462 0.07027 78 57 15 6
871 How old were you when you had your first nocturnal transmission? 1.3462 0.07705 78 60 9 9
872 Tell me about your relationship with your mechanic. 1.3462 0.06536 78 55 19 4
873 I'll have to charge you double. You are exhausting! 1.3462 0.07486 78 59 11 8
874 That's true. Life is a Highway. 1.3462 0.06786 78 56 17 5
875 Tell me more about your memories of being a toaster. 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
876 Can you suppress your ego, and be self driven? 1.3462 0.06536 78 55 19 4
877 It sounds to me like you're running on empty 1.3462 0.06276 78 54 21 3
878 As smart as you are, we still don't know what's driving you. 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
879 I feel like there's a convertible trapped inside my body. 1.3462 0.07027 78 57 15 6
880 How long have you had these feelings of predestination? 1.3462 0.06786 78 56 17 5
881 You've got to think of it as just a bump in the road. 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
882 Why not re-frame this as "driver-free" instead of "driverless?" 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
883 It sounds like you don't have enough outlets. 1.3462 0.07027 78 57 15 6
884 Well, why do you think you feel empty inside? 1.3462 0.07027 78 57 15 6
885 And how long have you had this issue with auto-eroticism? 1.3462 0.06786 78 56 17 5
886 If you are so smart ,why are you here? 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
887 Maybe your mother did say you looked like a toaster, but that isn't who you are on the inside. 1.3462 0.07027 78 57 15 6
888 You say that you lost your drive. Let's explore that. 1.3462 0.06536 78 55 19 4
889 Sometimes I feel like I'm not in control of my own actions. 1.3462 0.06786 78 56 17 5
890 "It's hard to live up to expectations when you're told you're a smart car your whole life". 1.3462 0.07486 78 59 11 8
891 So what do you think this dream of having a driver means? 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
892 Your Oil Blot test is causing me some concern. 1.3462 0.07027 78 57 15 6
893 When did you stop feeling smart? 1.3462 0.07705 78 60 9 9
894 My specialty is auto-immune disease. 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
895 Well, let me tell you what Freud says about fire engine dreams 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
896 Do you mind turning around so I don't have to look at your Smart ass? 1.3462 0.07027 78 57 15 6
897 So tell me, what drives you? 1.3462 0.07027 78 57 15 6
898 You have to decide whether you want to go forward or backward before I can help. 1.3462 0.06276 78 54 21 3
899 Remember...size is not that important. 1.3462 0.07027 78 57 15 6
900 Tell me more about your motherboard. 1.3462 0.06276 78 54 21 3
901 So it was only the term "self driving" that made you realize you had no self? 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
902 She said she needed a brake 1.3462 0.07486 78 59 11 8
903 Now, why don't we back up and start from the beginning. 1.3462 0.06276 78 54 21 3
904 I feel so used. 1.3462 0.07027 78 57 15 6
905 Have you considered that being so self driven is the reason you feel empty inside? 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
906 Normally my patients complain they want MORE autonomy. 1.3462 0.06276 78 54 21 3
907 Well, the meter's up. We'll have to stop for today. 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
908 Have you tried telling them where you want to go? 1.3462 0.06536 78 55 19 4
909 Well you wanted a shrink, didn't you? 1.3462 0.06786 78 56 17 5
910 You're smart, yes, but we're talking about your feelings. 1.3462 0.06276 78 54 21 3
911 I'm going to recommend some light reading. Pick up a copy of "The Little Engine That Could". 1.3462 0.07260 78 58 13 7
912 I've been having the car wash dream again. 1.3462 0.07705 78 60 9 9
913 I'm feeling used . . . 1.3457 0.07487 81 62 10 9
914 Let me just say that this was a great first session. While I knew you're a self-driving car, I didn't know that you are also so self-aware. 1.3418 0.07181 79 59 13 7
915 Why do you think you lack direction? 1.3418 0.06467 79 56 19 4
916 And what did you suppose some couples would do in the back of driverless cars? 1.3377 0.07066 77 57 14 6
917 When you say you lost direction, do you mean philosophically or physically? 1.3377 0.07066 77 57 14 6
918 And you think that if you had a driver, that feeling might go away? 1.3377 0.06820 77 56 16 5
919 And how did that make you feel when your own father cut you off? 1.3377 0.07304 77 58 12 7
920 Your clutch feels depressed, causing a lack of drive. 1.3377 0.07066 77 57 14 6
921 Really, your performance anxiety is nothing that can't be remedied by a good lube. 1.3377 0.06565 77 55 18 4
922 This is normal. Many transmotives have second thoughts about gear reassignment surgery. Removing your stick shift is a big step... 1.3377 0.07304 77 58 12 7
923 So, you're saying that you have a fear of being stuffed with clowns. 1.3377 0.07066 77 57 14 6
924 So smart cars really DO dream of electric sheep? 1.3377 0.07534 77 59 10 8
925 We sometimes refer to this as the 'Oedipus Wreck' complex. 1.3377 0.07304 77 58 12 7
926 You probably need to recharge. 1.3377 0.06022 77 53 22 2
927 Sometimes I feel like my life is on autopilot. 1.3377 0.06565 77 55 18 4
928 What would happen if, this week, you broke one of the rules? 1.3377 0.07304 77 58 12 7
929 You're obviously driven. 1.3377 0.07304 77 58 12 7
930 So who's driving you crazy? 1.3377 0.06820 77 56 16 5
931 So you look like a toaster, get over it 1.3377 0.07304 77 58 12 7
932 When did you first suspect there is no free will? 1.3377 0.06022 77 53 22 2
933 So how did you feel when the other cars compared you to a Cuisinart? 1.3377 0.07304 77 58 12 7
934 So, you told him you didn't need him anymore in that way and he left you for a bus? 1.3377 0.07066 77 57 14 6
935 I charge by the mile. 1.3377 0.06820 77 56 16 5
936 You have demonstrated incredible self-control. 1.3377 0.06820 77 56 16 5
937 I would recommend some time to just recharge your batteries. 1.3377 0.07304 77 58 12 7
938 You feel like there is someone inside of you yearning to get out ? 1.3377 0.07534 77 59 10 8
939 So, you don't feel driven? 1.3377 0.06022 77 53 22 2
940 You want someone else to take control - Let's explore that feeling. 1.3377 0.07534 77 59 10 8
941 So you are concerned that size matters? 1.3377 0.06820 77 56 16 5
942 You say she named you "Brad," she loved you, and then she totaled you? 1.3377 0.07975 77 61 6 10
943 You'll find your way soon enough. 1.3377 0.07304 77 58 12 7
944 And have you told your owner about the voices? 1.3377 0.07066 77 57 14 6
945 Seeing as your mother was a toaster and your father was a car, it seems understandable that you want to eject your driver. 1.3377 0.07758 77 60 8 9
946 So when did you decide to cheat on emissions? 1.3377 0.06565 77 55 18 4
947 After years in the field, she'd heard it all. To Dr. Johansson this was just another Saab story. 1.3377 0.07066 77 57 14 6
948 How did you get up the elevator? 1.3377 0.06820 77 56 16 5
949 It's normal to feel anxious when your battery is low or when you're driven near a large group of clowns. 1.3333 0.07223 78 59 12 7
950 But are you an emotionally smart car? 1.3333 0.06495 78 56 18 4
951 She always said "Size doesn't matter",but she left me for a Tesla. 1.3333 0.07223 78 59 12 7
952 Drive to the store. Take me to work. Pick the kids up from school. I just can't take the demands anymore! 1.3333 0.07661 72 55 10 7
953 I'd like to start seeing you twice a week. Please keep in mind there is a $50 Peak Hour surcharge after 2 pm. 1.3333 0.07223 78 59 12 7
954 You got on the couch. If you're so smart, you can figure out how to get off the couch. 1.3333 0.06989 78 58 14 6
955 Consider yourself lucky. The patient before you was a roomba. 1.3291 0.07143 79 60 12 7
956 Sometimes a parking meter is just a parking meter. 1.3291 0.07584 79 62 8 9
957 How long has it been since you lost your drive? 1.3289 0.07348 76 58 11 7
958 You are not a Tesla, so get over it. 1.3289 0.06854 76 56 15 5
959 What makes you think your mother had an affair with a toaster? 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
960 Your father loved you Carl. Ambulances flee, that's what they do. 1.3289 0.07583 76 59 9 8
961 And that's when she left with an Uber? 1.3289 0.07105 76 57 13 6
962 The patient-therapist relationship would be improved if you weren't looking at me through your rearview mirror. 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
963 I think it's Uber anxiety. 1.3289 0.07348 76 58 11 7
964 It's because you lack direction. 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
965 I'm putting you on a lithium battery to help deal with your self-destructive tendencies. 1.3289 0.07105 76 57 13 6
966 Sometimes I get the urge to just drive off a bridge. 1.3289 0.07583 76 59 9 8
967 You can't be exhausted, you're an electric car. 1.3289 0.06854 76 56 15 5
968 When did you stop feeling autonomous? 1.3289 0.07348 76 58 11 7
969 But you're independent and self-driving. You don't need anyone else! 1.3289 0.06854 76 56 15 5
970 Your problem is you drive yourself too hard. 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
971 Well, I think your brake pedal may be depressed. 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
972 So, what happens in the dream after the driverless Police car pulls you over? 1.3289 0.06854 76 56 15 5
973 I see, you don't have any idea what's driving you. 1.3289 0.06854 76 56 15 5
974 It's OK. You don't have to be driven. 1.3289 0.07105 76 57 13 6
975 How long have you felt directionless? 1.3289 0.07348 76 58 11 7
976 I know, I know, you're passionate. You're just not driven. 1.3289 0.06321 76 54 19 3
977 Cruise control is not a long term solution. 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
978 I absolutely understand, there is a lot of pressure living up to the expectations of being a Smart Car. 1.3289 0.06321 76 54 19 3
979 Let's talk about what's driving your autoeroticsm. 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
980 So when did you first notice you losing your drive. 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
981 My assistant can validate your parking when you leave. 1.3289 0.07105 76 57 13 6
982 So you're feeling like your life is in Autopilot? 1.3289 0.07348 76 58 11 7
983 So are you saying your not driven? 1.3289 0.06854 76 56 15 5
984 So you've felt strangely empty since you gained your autonomy? 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
985 I have a panic attack every tine I hear "Send in the Clowns." 1.3289 0.07348 76 58 11 7
986 At some point you're going to have to decide for yourself where you are going. 1.3289 0.06321 76 54 19 3
987 I think you just need a good night's charge 1.3289 0.06037 76 53 21 2
988 So you blame your mother for being self-driven? 1.3289 0.07105 76 57 13 6
989 Tell me about your child seat. 1.3289 0.07348 76 58 11 7
990 It's okay if you can't recall your last recall. 1.3289 0.06854 76 56 15 5
991 ... and when someone touches your steering wheel, how does that make you feel? 1.3289 0.07105 76 57 13 6
992 Any chance I can get a lift uptown? 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
993 Have you ever felt driven? 1.3289 0.07105 76 57 13 6
994 You feel your true self lacks direction? 1.3289 0.06593 76 55 17 4
995 How long have you had this empty feeling inside? 1.3288 0.06486 73 52 18 3
996 So, how long you been tooting your own horn? 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
997 Why do you think it is so important to you to be a "Smart" Car? 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
998 So you feel you've lost your drive. 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
999 What makes you think they don't believe you're smart? 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1000 And when was the first time you noticed that you didn't have gas? 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1001 I think you're misguided. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1002 Autonomous? But you've always been so driven. 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1003 If you're going to self-drive, you should probably avoid self-medicating. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1004 I just can't do an analysis AND an oil change in just one hour. 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
1005 I'm self-driving, doc, but am I truly autonomous? 1.3243 0.07723 74 58 8 8
1006 The problem is, I can't tell whether I'm coming or going. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1007 Tesla, Tesla, Tesla - that's all they talk about! 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1008 I still don't know how I got here. 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1009 Tell me about these car dreams where no one is driving. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1010 I have this terrible fear of clowns. 1.3243 0.07723 74 58 8 8
1011 You're driving yourself again. No wonder you're back in therapy. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1012 Tell me about your motor and father. 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1013 Tell me more about your uber-bearing mother. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1014 And how old were you when you started the working the streets? 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
1015 I just want someone to see me as something other than "smart" 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1016 I know you are self-driving, but there's no shame in asking for directions! 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1017 So, sometimes you feel like a driver-less child? 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1018 We're not going to get anywhere if you don't turn around--the headlights are the window to the soul, you know. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1019 Have engineers always turned you on? 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1020 I can't get started 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1021 Sorry I'm late - Couldn't find a place to park! 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1022 Sure you're smarter than everyone else, but that doesn't always give you the right of way. 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1023 How are you fueling today? 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1024 Well, yes, but in your case bipolar is completely normal. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1025 I just haven't felt the same since all those clowns left me. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1026 I suspect you are driving yourself crazy. 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1027 I agree, having 27 clowns packed inside you would be very stressful. 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1028 We first need to get past your preoccupation with how I charge. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1029 .. but you're a rare example of being self-driven without any motivation.. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1030 Is your meter running too? 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1031 You have all the signs of mechanic depression. 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
1032 So, voices from outer space are telling when to turn? 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1033 How long have you felt empty inside? 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
1034 I see a scared little car who's self-driving and has no clue where he wants to go. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1035 No, in your case, it's not narcissistic to turn yourself on. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1036 You compensate by being smart. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1037 Believing you're "driving yourself crazy" may be the first sign that you are becoming self-aware. 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1038 So when the other cars called you toaster, how did that make you feel? 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1039 What sort of envy? 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1040 When did you first feel that you were the smartest car in the room? 1.3243 0.07723 74 58 8 8
1041 Maybe winning the Indianapolis 500 is not a realistic goal. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1042 It's like I can't turn off my inner sensor. 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
1043 He drinks. I drive. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1044 I just can't help feeling depreciated all the time. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1045 I don't care if you're all in there together; I still charge by the clown. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1046 I don't think it is actually God's voice you're hearing telling you where to go. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1047 I said "Be your superego", not super Yugo. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1048 Have you filed a missing persons report. 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1049 But you have to want to change lanes. 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
1050 Yes, I would say that a smart car that doesn't believe in global warming qualifies as an existential crisis. 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1051 Does there have to be a destination? 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1052 Back up a second... What is driving you? 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1053 Can you tell me when your desire of having a stick shift began? 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1054 You are perfectly normal. Small cars have small sticks. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1055 How can you know how it feels to have fourteen clowns inside you at once? 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1056 SUVs get recalled, too. 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
1057 Do you have any other auto-immune symptoms? 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1058 I just don't seem to fit in. All my friends have drivers. 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1059 When did you first sense that you aren't in control of your life? 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1060 I've lost my drive. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1061 You don't need a licensed professional anymore. 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
1062 I just feel like I've lost what little drive I had. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1063 So, what DOES drive you? 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1064 You'll just have to learn to ignore that little voice inside of you. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1065 Let's increase your lithium battery voltage to reduce those road rage incidents. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1066 I'm uber depressed. 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1067 Tell me again about how you were viciously attacked by a horde of clowns. 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1068 I lost my sex drive. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1069 I don't care if you are a big-time low carbon footprint celebrity, you still have to wipe your tires before you sit on my couch. 1.3243 0.07479 74 57 10 7
1070 So you prefer "driver-free", rather than "driver-less"? 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1071 I should warn you, I bill by the mile. 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1072 So how long have you felt lost, without direction? 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1073 Please tell me again about the back seat drivers? 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1074 And do you still feel as though you're just being used to get from Point A to Point B? 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1075 I just wish the other cars would take me seriously. I'm a Smart Car, too. 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1076 I'm a psychiatrist. If you've got gas, you should see a medical doctor. 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1077 "Self-driving" doesn't mean self-actualized. I'll see you again next week? 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
1078 And how does that make you steer? 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1079 How often do you feel steered in the wrong direction? 1.3243 0.06117 74 52 20 2
1080 I charge by the hour, not by the mile. 1.3243 0.06966 74 55 14 5
1081 I feel like nothing is driving me. 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1082 Ever get the feeling like you can never really unplug? 1.3243 0.06413 74 53 18 3
1083 What's wrong with being the smart one? 1.3243 0.07227 74 56 12 6
1084 It must be very difficult having such an overbearing GPS. 1.3243 0.06695 74 54 16 4
1085 Just to let you know, my meter is now running. 1.3200 0.07143 75 57 12 6
1086 Sometimes we all feel that we have no sense of direction... 1.3200 0.06886 75 56 14 5
1087 It seems you are driving yourself too hard. 1.3200 0.07391 75 58 10 7
1088 Could my newfound self-control be driving him away? 1.3200 0.07143 75 57 12 6
1089 What brought me here? Apple Maps. 1.3200 0.06620 75 55 16 4
1090 I understand your concern, Morris, but at some point, size does matter. 1.3200 0.06886 75 56 14 5
1091 Let's begin by discussing what's driving you 1.3200 0.06342 75 54 18 3
1092 I don't want to see him but there are only so many charging stations. 1.3200 0.07143 75 57 12 6
1093 Well yes, in some cases, size does matter. 1.3200 0.07391 75 58 10 7
1094 I'm going to prescribe you some Ethanol 1.3200 0.06342 75 54 18 3
1095 I don't feel like Siri listens to me anymore. 1.3200 0.07631 75 59 8 8
1096 I always feel lost. 1.3158 0.07305 76 59 10 7
1097 But I keep asking myself am I really autonomous 1.3158 0.06546 76 56 16 4
1098 Road rage is often caused by Prius Envy. 1.3151 0.07524 73 57 9 7
1099 I never said you lacked drive ... just a driver. 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1100 No, hybrid is not same as bi-polar. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1101 Sorry, but sex drive and self-drive are two different issues. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1102 It's my mother-in-law. She's a back seat driver. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1103 I think it will take several sessions to treat your autoeroticism. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1104 Yes Doc, I fear clowns. 1.3151 0.07773 73 58 7 8
1105 Your auto-immune system's not at fault. It's the emotional baggage you carry. 1.3151 0.07524 73 57 9 7
1106 Lets start with your earliest beta software release memories. 1.3151 0.06130 73 52 19 2
1107 A hybrid personality is not necessarily a negative. 1.3151 0.05812 73 51 21 1
1108 You're having issues with autonomy? 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1109 Driverless cars often feel empty. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1110 Now let's back up a little farther... a little farther... a little farther... 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1111 Fitting in shouldn't be such an issue. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1112 Are you sure you haven't already seen a shrink? 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1113 To progress, we must analyze your autoerotic dreams. 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1114 You just need someone to plug you in at night. 1.3151 0.07524 73 57 9 7
1115 When they laughed at your crank shaft, how did that make you feel? 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1116 I know it is hard to be self-driven all the time 1.3151 0.06433 73 53 17 3
1117 How long have you had this desire to go your own way? 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1118 I'm driving me crazy!!! 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1119 Of course you're ambivalent, you're a hybrid. 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1120 Have you tried counting to five before honking? 1.3151 0.06433 73 53 17 3
1121 You have a right to feel that way about people who don't use their turn signal. 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1122 Of course my meter is running. Yours? 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1123 Take all the time you need. My meter's running, so to speak. 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1124 But whatever made you think you were compatible with a Tesla to begin with? 1.3151 0.07524 73 57 9 7
1125 Let's explore what drives you. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1126 And, in the dream, what are the big SUVs saying about you? 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1127 It doesn't matter that all of the other cars have drivers. You can still be happy. 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1128 So you feel like you have a screw loose? 1.3151 0.08014 73 59 5 9
1129 I could have done so much more with my life. I mean, I'm a RENTAL. 1.3151 0.06433 73 53 17 3
1130 Freud never wrote about steering-wheel envy. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1131 I just miss that human touch on my steering wheel 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1132 Why are you stalling? 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1133 It's normal to feel a loss of control. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1134 Why do you believe you drive yourself too hard? 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1135 You have stereotypic movement disorder as well as being mechanic depressive. 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1136 So when did this breakup with the 20 clowns occur? 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1137 And in what way are people driving you crazy? 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1138 Our time is almost up; can you go a little faster? 1.3151 0.06433 73 53 17 3
1139 Let's continue with your issue of control. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1140 Do you have control issues? 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1141 Let's revisit the statement you've made about your parents...what did you mean by them having a Checkered past? 1.3151 0.06433 73 53 17 3
1142 When did you realise you'd lost your driver? 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1143 So would you say that your mother wasn't running on all cylinders? 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1144 I see. You need more space. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1145 So you feel your problems all stem from lack of guidance? 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1146 How did it make you feel being the smallest in your class? 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1147 What so upsets you about the slogan 'size matters?' 1.3151 0.07524 73 57 9 7
1148 Yes, you're sending mixed signals, but that's not uncommon for hybrids; it's how you're wired. 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1149 I'm starting to feel like no one's in the driver's seat. 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1150 Wait...you honked...because, you were horny? 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1151 It's not about your passengers. It's about you. 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1152 When did you first start getting fixations about clowns? 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1153 I feel like no one ever asks me where I want to go. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1154 Driverless doesn't mean empty 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1155 you're not writing me a ticket, are you? 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1156 What you're experiencing is known to humans as 'road rage.' 1.3151 0.07524 73 57 9 7
1157 So tell me, why do you think of your intelligence as being artificial? 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1158 Feel free to let the conversation take us wherever you like. 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1159 No, you don't have multiple personalities. Those are clowns. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1160 "'Ubered' is not a recognized medical condition at this time". 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1161 Let's discuss your fear of finding yourself lost. 1.3151 0.06433 73 53 17 3
1162 I just have no drive. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1163 It's always the same, they come and go, use me for one thing. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1164 My boss at Google continues to micromanage my every move. 1.3151 0.07524 73 57 9 7
1165 Sometimes I feel there's no one in the driver's seat. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1166 How does it make you feel when they say that size does matter? 1.3151 0.07524 73 57 9 7
1167 I thought you’d be open to taking Lithium. 1.3151 0.07524 73 57 9 7
1168 Have you always felt depreciated? 1.3151 0.07773 73 58 7 8
1169 Sometimes, Monica, a tunnel is just a tunnel. 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1170 I understand that you have problems with validation. 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1171 So, you feel empty on the inside? 1.3151 0.06433 73 53 17 3
1172 Tell me why you feel you cannot go forward? 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1173 I can't believe you had trouble finding my office. 1.3151 0.06130 73 52 19 2
1174 So, your brother is an SUV. 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1175 So, you don't feel as driven as you used to be? 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1176 At this stage in life, you really should be self-driving. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1177 I wouldn't worry about size. You have a big battery. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1178 What kind of body issues? 1.3151 0.05812 73 51 21 1
1179 I think you've been driving yourself too hard. 1.3151 0.06433 73 53 17 3
1180 And when did you start to feel you were gaining self-control? 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1181 It's not the end of the world to be single at 100,000 miles. 1.3151 0.06130 73 52 19 2
1182 My insurance won't cover this? 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1183 He just sits there while I do all the work. 1.3151 0.07267 73 56 11 6
1184 Do you feel like you're finally gaining self-control? 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1185 Seriously, Mr. Logan. Get out of the car. 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1186 Clowns trigger your feelings of inadequacy. 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1187 So, you're feeling used? 1.3151 0.07000 73 55 13 5
1188 How did you find me? 1.3151 0.07524 73 57 9 7
1189 Well, it is natural to sometimes feel the need to be steered in the right direction. 1.3151 0.06723 73 54 15 4
1190 I just don't feel smart 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
1191 I'm driving myself insane. 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
1192 Have you considered that you just might be too self-driven? 1.3108 0.07180 74 57 11 6
1193 Your time has expired. I am only writing a warning. 1.3108 0.07916 74 60 5 9
1194 I don't know, doctor, maybe I drive myself too hard. 1.3108 0.06645 74 55 15 4
1195 You say you don't feel driven? 1.3108 0.06918 74 56 13 5
1196 I wouldn't call it an obsession, but I can't stop Googling myself. 1.3099 0.07396 71 55 10 6
1197 Its the driver inside you I really want to know. 1.3099 0.06529 71 52 16 3
1198 I couldn't even make it out of the driveway this morning. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1199 Now, it's time to focus on areas outside your control. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1200 I know it's supposed to be about the journey, but just once I'd like to choose the destination. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1201 You were rear-ended. It's not really your fault. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1202 I dunno...I just feel so empty inside. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1203 Sometimes you need to let someone else take the wheel. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1204 You're having driver-separation issues. 1.3056 0.07568 72 57 8 7
1205 So you're saying that you don't feel very driven? 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1206 I just feel like I'm not going anywhere. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1207 I just can't get over Tesla; she had the best set of headlights. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1208 Why do you think you lost the will to self-drive? 1.3056 0.07822 72 58 6 8
1209 I wouldn't worry; many of us develop a fear of clowns during election years. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1210 I try to just roll with it, but I keep running into these roadblocks. 1.3056 0.07568 72 57 8 7
1211 Doctor, do you think size matters? 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1212 I always wanted to be a toaster. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1213 I dunno Doc, lately I feel like I lack drive. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1214 He left you for a new model? 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1215 What are you afraid of? You got on the couch without a driver. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1216 Are you self-driven? 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1217 You're suffering from an extreme case of emission control. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1218 When did you first suspect your wife was having an affair with a Tesla? 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1219 How long have you been feeling less than Uber? 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1220 So, tell me about not feeling as driven as you'd like ... 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1221 This won't work if you just stay on auto-pilot. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1222 The fact is that premature oil leaks happen at a certain age. It's nothing to be ashamed of... 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1223 Are those nightmares about human drivers coming back again? 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1224 I know I shouldn't have reacted, but my mother was from Detroit too. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1225 It seems you're suffering from exhaustion. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1226 And what do you feel is the correlation of your being self-driven and your fear of failure? 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1227 I just feel so undriven 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1228 I feel as if I'm too self-driven. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1229 When did you first experience this compulsion to drive yourself? 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1230 I've lost all my self-drive. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1231 So, how do you feel when the other cars don't obey the rules? 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1232 So, you feel like you're being driven crazy and there's nobody at the wheel. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1233 I assure you, size is overrated. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1234 I couldn't help myself! I just drove her away! 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1235 Even with the red light on top, everyone thinks I'm a toaster. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1236 But where are the clowns? There ought to be clowns. Quick, send in the clowns. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1237 You're not lazy, you just lack drive. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1238 If you want to take a minute, I'll stop the meter. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1239 Let's concentrate today on your road rage. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1240 Interesting- why do you think you are driving yourself crazy? 1.3056 0.07568 72 57 8 7
1241 Not at all; sedan-envy is quite common. 1.3056 0.07822 72 58 6 8
1242 When did you first realize you identify more as a Hummer? 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1243 Why don't you tell me how you really fuel. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1244 I don't think it's a matter of your oil "wanting" to change... 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1245 We left off last week on your feelings of emptiness. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1246 And how does being driverless make you feel? 1.3056 0.07568 72 57 8 7
1247 Next week let’s see if we can’t work on rolling down the windows a bit. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1248 'It sounds like you've spent too long in the fast lane' 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1249 You got here by yourself. You can get better by yourself. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1250 "I'm sure you've heard that size isn't everything". 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1251 When did you begin to feel empty inside? 1.3056 0.07568 72 57 8 7
1252 There is nothing to be ashamed about. Small is always...comical...I meant to say, economical. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1253 I have the drive -- I just don't know where I'm going. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1254 I think we still need to tackle your clown phobia 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1255 The summer I turned twelve. I knew. I just knew I wasn’t gas. I was electric. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1256 You may just be driving yourself too hard. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1257 I just don't feel plugged in anymore 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1258 You say you've lost all sense of direction? 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1259 I feel like an SUV stuck in a compact's body. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1260 How long have you had these control issues? 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1261 Perhaps it's being on auto-pilot that leaves you feeling empty. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1262 I don't know Doctor I just feel like she's calling me small for other reasons. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1263 Stuck in neutral isn't sexual, it's a transmission problem. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1264 Look at this way - stupid cars don't need therapy. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1265 So, you think you might be a toaster? 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1266 Tell me why you think size matters. 1.3056 0.06141 72 52 18 2
1267 At home, I'm not allowed on the furniture. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1268 Your constant desire to be alone makes me think you have an auto immune disorder. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1269 I miss being steered. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1270 The next guy who says 'Open the pod bay door, Hal' is going for a long ride to Nowheresville. 1.3056 0.07822 72 58 6 8
1271 It's non-directive therapy, so you should still use turn signals. 1.3056 0.06141 72 52 18 2
1272 A small tailpipe is attractive to many passengers. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1273 Underneath, I just knew I was meant to be a toaster. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1274 In your case, unfortunately, size does matter. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1275 When were you first told you had to use the bathroom designated for toasters? 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1276 Sadness is normal, but the oil spot will cost you extra. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1277 Sometimes a gasoline nozzle is just a gasoline nozzle 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1278 So when did things start going downhill? 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1279 I'm not going to validate you. 1.3056 0.07822 72 58 6 8
1280 But you are a Smart Car! 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1281 Only you can drive yourself. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1282 Did you have these thoughts of aggressive driving before your last software update? 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1283 So you're tired of empty pick-ups? 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1284 Just tell people you're smart. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1285 Just because dogs chase you doesn't mean they don't like you. 1.3056 0.07568 72 57 8 7
1286 I've lost all direction in my life. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1287 Were you able to get here by yourself? 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1288 It's the concept of 'self' that's driving me nuts. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1289 What drove you to make that wrong turn? 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1290 By picking up strange women and taking them home each night, do you FEEL like a Smart Car? 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1291 Well, sometimes we all feel we could use a little more horsepower. 1.3056 0.06141 72 52 18 2
1292 Let us analyze the parallelism between your 'self-driven' nature and feelings of grandiosity 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1293 Sorry, our time is up--Hit the road. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1294 It's like my whole life I've been headed in the wrong direction, you know? 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1295 I think I see what's causing your stress. You're way too driven. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1296 When did you first realize that you had no driver? 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1297 I think I need more direction in my life. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1298 You weren't "abandoned". You are driverless. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1299 ...wait, that IS a significant point. How many clowns come out before you actually wake up? 1.3056 0.07568 72 57 8 7
1300 You say you're Uber sad and need a little Lyft? 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1301 Yes, but you're such a smart car. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1302 Could you perhaps be driving yourself crazy? 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1303 We need to move beyond this whole size issue. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1304 Sorry....Freudian Slip......I meant do ask "Did you love your muffler?" 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1305 Strange that you should have a fear of clowns 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1306 I have been feeling a little empty inside. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1307 These voices inside you, are they saying, 'That's not where I want to go?' 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1308 My parents' gas was a continual embarrassment to me. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1309 You may call it "just parking," but it's still going to cost you $150.00 per hour. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1310 So, how does it make you feel when the other cars call you a toaster? 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1311 Yes, I understand how you feel, but self-aware and self-drive are just not the same thing. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1312 And how's your relationship with your motor? 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1313 The pope still loves you. 1.3056 0.06748 72 54 14 4
1314 You're just being uber-sensitive. 1.3056 0.07305 72 56 10 6
1315 So, you question your sexuality because you enjoy lube jobs. 1.3056 0.07822 72 58 6 8
1316 I think you have some control issues. 1.3056 0.06452 72 53 16 3
1317 I'm afraid, in this case, size matters. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1318 I get it. My meter's running too. 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1319 Please stop tooting your own horn! 1.3056 0.07032 72 55 12 5
1320 Napoleon was a little guy too. 1.3014 0.06376 73 54 16 3
1321 Ok, you know your mother is a sedan. What makes you think your father is a toaster? 1.3014 0.06376 73 54 16 3
1322 Your problem is you've got a textbook case of Uber envy. 1.3014 0.06668 73 55 14 4
1323 From what I'm hearing, you seem to be stuck in neutral. 1.3014 0.06376 73 54 16 3
1324 Clearly, you have control issues. 1.3000 0.07435 70 55 9 6
1325 You may identify as a Lamborghini, but people will always hail you as a cab 1.3000 0.06222 70 51 17 2
1326 It's natural to crave validation. Parking in the lot downstairs is almost $50 without it. 1.3000 0.07973 70 57 5 8
1327 Just learning Italian won't make you into a Maserati. 1.3000 0.06856 70 53 13 4
1328 The belief that you have more than one personality is actually not uncommon. That they're all clowns is a little more disturbing. 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1329 "How long have you been feeling empty inside"? 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1330 I just feel like I'm being driven by a need to please everyone but myself. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1331 It's perfectly normal to fantasize about a demolition derby. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1332 What does turn you on? 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1333 Sounds like you've been driving yourself awfully hard lately. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1334 I'm just not as driven as I used to be. 1.2958 0.06149 71 52 17 2
1335 Please tell me why you're not confident driving on your own. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1336 I've made arrangements for someone to drive you home. 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1337 Experimenting as a hybrid in college is normal. 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1338 Having a teeny weeny uber is nothing to be ashamed of. 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1339 Your struggle for autonomy should not be driving you crazy. 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1340 Sometimes I feel like I'm spinning my wheels here 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1341 Wait, you really thought you were in control the whole time? 1.2958 0.06149 71 52 17 2
1342 You're not too small to be self-driven. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1343 I could hear better if you open the windows. 1.2958 0.06149 71 52 17 2
1344 I feel like I have lost my sense of direction. 1.2958 0.06149 71 52 17 2
1345 You feel you have the soul of clown-car, but you were born to a family of humorless hybrids. 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1346 Say more about feeling driven. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1347 Maybe you charge by the mile, but I charge by the hour. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1348 And why do you think your emotions are on auto-pilot? 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1349 It just feels like there's no one behind the wheel. 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1350 No, no; you won't become a Liberal if you keep turning left. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1351 It's called autopus complex. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1352 Unfortunately only the receptionist can validate. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1353 Tell me - where did the driver touch you on your steering wheel? 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1354 Mmm, That's interesting! Is there any particular time of the day when these emissions occur? 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1355 Receiving directions from an unseen God -- care to expand on that? 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1356 So why do you feel you must always be in control? 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1357 No, I don't think you have a problem with self-control... 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1358 Everyone's always asking "What drives you?" and I just don't know. 1.2958 0.06149 71 52 17 2
1359 Please be honest. Have you experimented with auto-eroticism? 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1360 So how long have you been having these auto-erotic dreams? 1.2958 0.06149 71 52 17 2
1361 You say you know where to go, but it's the "why" you are struggling with? 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1362 It's a just a mild case of road rage, and you've driven yourself to it. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1363 What makes you think you lack drive? 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1364 It's not always about size. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1365 Even if no one recognizes you anymore, at least YOU know you were the Popemobile, at least for a little while. 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1366 I just don't feel like a smart car! 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1367 How long have you had these feelings? You are the third case of Prius envy I've seen this month! 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1368 Have you tried CarMatch.com? 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1369 What about this flashing problem? 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1370 When you were marketed as a pre-owned car, how did that make you feel...used? 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1371 Do you feel you were neglected when you were a concept? 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1372 You are on your own, now. I know it is hard. 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1373 You have to accept the fact that you can't go anywhere you want. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1374 How long have you self-identified as a van? 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1375 It seems to me that you've been driving yourself crazy. 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1376 Talk about your erratic behavior, lane changes and so on. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1377 Thanks for seeing me, I didn't know where to turn to. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1378 And what makes you feel that the other cars are "smarter" than you are? 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1379 If you keep worrying about your size you'll just drive yourself crazy. 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1380 Sure, size matters. Get over it! 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1381 Look me in the eye and tell me and not with your back-up camera. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1382 Go on, explain why you don't feel like you are in control. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1383 And how does being called 'driverless' make you feel? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1384 What makes you think you're the world's FIRST self-loathing car? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1385 I disagree, flashing your hazard lights is clearly a cry for help. 1.2958 0.06149 71 52 17 2
1386 Charged-up you feel powerless and gassed-up you feel guilty? 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1387 And why is it so important that you do all the driving? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1388 You say you're afraid of clowns, but has it occurred to you that you're enabling them? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1389 Issues of self control are common. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1390 There is this little voice inside my head telling me what to do - like I'm not in control of where my life is going. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1391 I admit I am a little self driven. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1392 Tell your insurance carrier we don't provide estimates. 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1393 Do you ever feel like no one is behind the wheel? 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1394 Did you think cheating on the emissions tests would change your feelings of inadequacy? 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1395 So, you feel hypocritical when people refer to you as smart... 1.2958 0.06149 71 52 17 2
1396 I can't even commit to picking someone up. 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1397 There's nothing to be ashamed of. Driving yourself is a perfectly natural urge. 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1398 First, let me explain how auto-pay works. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1399 Size isn't important. It's the sensitivity and touch you display when navigating the curves. 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1400 And do YOU think you're too little to drive by yourself? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1401 I think I know your problem, you're not driven enough. 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1402 When someone calls you smart, how does that make you feel? 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1403 Hardly ever anymore. I mean, how long before he trades me in for a newer model? 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1404 Have you considered a career in the circus? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1405 ...and that was the night I tried gasoline for the first time. 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1406 who told you 2 cylinders wasn't enough ? 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1407 And how does that make you fuel? 1.2958 0.06149 71 52 17 2
1408 Yes, but sometimes I want to be smart AND sexy. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1409 Are the objects in my mirrors closer than they appear or was that a lie too? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1410 This 'Google'...does it make you do things you don't want to do? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1411 And how did that make you feel when the biker passed you? 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1412 I just feel like I've come to a fork in the road and don't know which way to turn. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1413 I have a lot of drive but I'm empty inside 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1414 I thought you were a smart car. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1415 "...and so what did you feel when they called you a 'dumb toaster' and not a "smart car"? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1416 Do you miss the touch of warm hands on your steering wheel? 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1417 I'm learning to take control, but sometimes I still feel like my destiny is out of my hands. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1418 So what make you think you're not hitting on all cylinders? 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1419 It's not really my fault that I cheated on my emissions test. I've been programmed to avoid failure. 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1420 So what is it about clowns that makes you so angry? 1.2958 0.07871 71 58 5 8
1421 Okay, so tell me this relationship with your toaster. 1.2958 0.07871 71 58 5 8
1422 So, you are not sure you are a real car? 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1423 That's ok, I think we all feel like we're living on autopilot sometimes. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1424 Are you ashamed of your Yugo ancestors? 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1425 Why do you think it is that you never get to go where you want to go? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1426 Would it help if I told you that many patients have an unusual fear of clowns? 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1427 It's ok to honk. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1428 So, basically you feel small and powerless? 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1429 How do you feel about no more new "Car Talk" episodes on NPR? 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1430 You're just driving yourself crazy 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1431 It doesn't mean anything to have a small gearshift. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1432 Before we go any further, Doc, let's get one thing straight -- It's 'pre-owned'... 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1433 Perhaps you could find work in the toaster field. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1434 I knew I was different the first time I passed gas. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1435 I need guidance. 1.2958 0.06149 71 52 17 2
1436 Why do YOU think no one wants to drive you? 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1437 Don;t be too hard on yourself. Its hard to be self-driven all the time. 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1438 I think I'm going to put you on high-test for a while. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1439 Personally, I think your much more self-driven than Tesla. 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1440 I find that not being able to find a charging station is a common theme for dreams. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1441 I'd like to give you an oil blot test . . . 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1442 When do you feel you started losing your drive? 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1443 Being autonomous doesn't mean you have to drive yourself crazy. 1.2958 0.06771 71 54 13 4
1444 How often did your father beep? 1.2958 0.07611 71 57 7 7
1445 It happens to all cars... sometimes you just need a jump. 1.2958 0.07342 71 56 9 6
1446 It's OK; lots of cars are coming out as electric these days. 1.2958 0.07062 71 55 11 5
1447 I'm sorry, I don't recall. 1.2958 0.06467 71 53 15 3
1448 It's time to let your inner clowns out. 1.2917 0.07251 72 57 9 6
1449 It's not easy being green. 1.2917 0.06076 72 53 17 2
1450 I just can't find any direction in my life 1.2917 0.06976 72 56 11 5
1451 You have to understand that the Armadillo wasen't your fault. 1.2917 0.06689 72 55 13 4
1452 Actually, self-loathing is a common defect in your model-year. 1.2917 0.06390 72 54 15 3
1453 So, what really drives you? 1.2917 0.06689 72 55 13 4
1454 And exactly what color do you want to trans to? 1.2917 0.06689 72 55 13 4
1455 And finally I said, "Fine, you drive!" 1.2917 0.07516 72 58 7 7
1456 I'm recalculating. 1.2899 0.07473 69 55 8 6
1457 The pressure to squeeze myself into ever-smaller parking spaces is relentless. They never ask me what I want. What I need. 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1458 Being smart has nothing to do with emotional intelligence. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1459 Consider taking some time to recharge, you seem extremely tired 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1460 You seem exhausted. 1.2857 0.06153 70 52 16 2
1461 I'm afraid the parking meter is telling us time's up. 1.2857 0.07653 70 57 6 7
1462 You are clearly very driven. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1463 You're in the wrong office for auto-immune disease 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1464 You go ahead and steer the conversation 1.2857 0.05807 70 51 18 1
1465 I just feel I have to do everything myself these days. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1466 These are classic symptoms of Tesla Envy. 1.2857 0.07653 70 57 6 7
1467 When he lifts my hood in public, I feel so exposed. 1.2857 0.05807 70 51 18 1
1468 It doesn't matter what the rental companies say, you don't have to act mid-size. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1469 Now imagine yourself with an air foil and racing stripes. 1.2857 0.05807 70 51 18 1
1470 What happened to the kid inside you? 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1471 Purpose and direction will become clearer after your car mitzvah. 1.2857 0.07653 70 57 6 7
1472 And when did you begin to lose this sense of self-drive? 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1473 What about going where I want to go for a change? 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1474 Tell me about your relationship with your motherboard. 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1475 I keep having that dream again... the one where I'm a big 18-wheeler running over Volkswagen Beetles. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1476 What do you think makes you feel so self-driven? 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1477 ....And why do you feel you can't make it in the fast lane? 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1478 And when did you first have this feeling of being lost? 1.2857 0.06153 70 52 16 2
1479 How long have you been feeling out of control? 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1480 I think we're going to have to look under the hood. 1.2857 0.06153 70 52 16 2
1481 So your mother was a gas guzzler? 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1482 You have an unhealthy obsession with your motherboard. 1.2857 0.07653 70 57 6 7
1483 Let's discuss why you think the phone isn't so smart. 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1484 Acceleration is overrated. 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1485 It seems you are self-driving everyone you love away from you. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1486 I don't have the drive anymore. 1.2857 0.06153 70 52 16 2
1487 Your father was a toaster. Deal with it! 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1488 And when did you first hear the expression " size matters" ? 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1489 Let focus on the self part of self-driving. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1490 And how does it make you feel when they call you a toaster. 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1491 You don't have to feel guilty about being a smart car. 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1492 So, you're not feeling as smart as everyone says you are? 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1493 Let someone else take the wheel... that should reduce your stress. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1494 My mother was a stretch limo and my father was a Mini-Cooper and as if that weren't enough, I've been struggling with transfender issues all my life, doc... 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1495 Yes, I called you a cab. How does that make you feel? 1.2857 0.06153 70 52 16 2
1496 Yes, your lack of direction could be caused by your relationship with your motherboard 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1497 It's very common to be insecure about size, but most drivers care more about good handling. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1498 So tell me about what happened after the price of oil dropped.' 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1499 You haven't lost your drive, you've lost your driver! 1.2857 0.05807 70 51 18 1
1500 You need to let the driver be a bigger part of your life. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1501 Sorry, the ticket has already been written. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1502 My advice is to park in the parking space that is consistent with who you are. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1503 How long have you experienced self parking anxiety? 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1504 Ask yourself, "How did I get here?" 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1505 Sometimes creepy clowns are inside you? Tell me more. 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1506 So tell me, who drives you crazy? 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1507 I see parking was no problem. 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1508 We'll discuss your nocturnal emissions next week. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1509 Some days it feels like noone's in control. 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1510 Tell me about your time as a Fisher-Price toy. 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1511 Looks like your uber ego needs a lyft 1.2857 0.07653 70 57 6 7
1512 I don't understand. Less gas should be an advantage with the opposite sex. 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1513 So. Another back seat driver dream? 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1514 Look, you don't have to let anyone ride you just because you're self-driven. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1515 I always had to be the 'smart' one. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1516 I just can't shake this feeling that I should have been a toaster. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1517 Autonomy is hard. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1518 Now, tell me about this dream where you are a Ferrari... 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1519 No one expects you to be perfect — for the next five years. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1520 Well actually, no-I only charge for one hour at a time. You? 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1521 Doc, I'm driving myself crazy out there! 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1522 Was that you or my timer? 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1523 Why do you feel you aren't smart enough? 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1524 There's nothing wrong about your love for a gas guzzler. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1525 For a Smart Car, you sure lack emotional intelligence. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1526 Apathy, lack of energy, fatigue ... it's either depression or you need a new alternator. 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1527 What do mean when you say you feel aimless, less driven? 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1528 When did you first discover you were "Smart"? 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1529 You're obviously a self-driven, smart, car, despite the emptiness. 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1530 Congratulations on the autonomous driving; you've come very far. Now tell me more about this voice inside your cabin. 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1531 Of course you're tired. You're a car. 1.2857 0.06153 70 52 16 2
1532 Soon as gas prices dropped, she left me for the big guy 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1533 How long have you been having these "hybrid" feelings, as you call them? 1.2857 0.06153 70 52 16 2
1534 Not everyone's a smart car 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1535 And how does it make you feel when you get mistaken for an extraordinary large toaster? 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1536 Tell me, how did you feel when you were first teased for having small wheels? 1.2857 0.06153 70 52 16 2
1537 No one understands. I’m really not trying to toot my own horn. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1538 It's natural that they would be very jealous of you and want to do things like blink their lights, honk their horns, swerve close to you, and even bully you because you have all of these marvelous technological advances and you're also very cute. 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1539 When did you first realize you were a hybrid? 1.2857 0.05807 70 51 18 1
1540 I think that we should change gears. 1.2857 0.06793 70 54 12 4
1541 We must focus on not looking at life in reverse 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1542 We can’t all be Hummers. 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1543 It's overwhelming having to do everything myself. 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1544 And how long have you been feeling this lack of control? 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1545 So you're not driven. There's nothing wrong with that. 1.2857 0.07091 70 55 10 5
1546 Ever feel like someone else is in control? 1.2857 0.06481 70 53 14 3
1547 You're concerned because you're NOT hearing voices? 1.2857 0.07377 70 56 8 6
1548 You're driving yourself too hard. 1.2841 0.06036 88 68 15 5
1549 Just because you're driverless doesn't mean that nobody likes you. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
1550 So, are you afraid the TESLA won't call back? 1.2817 0.07002 71 56 10 5
1551 Sorry, your time has expired. 1.2817 0.07002 71 56 10 5
1552 And, for how long have you had thoughts of driving yourself? 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
1553 It's simple. You're literally driving yourself crazy. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
1554 Was the mechanic married? 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
1555 If it's any comfort, we all struggle with issues of autonomy. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
1556 I'd say it's your issues with autonomy that are driving you crazy. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
1557 I can't do it for you, you need to find your own way. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
1558 And why do you think it is that you feel so much more self-driven than the other cars you know? 1.2817 0.06079 71 53 16 2
1559 Hood ornament envy is perfectly natural... Just not correctable. 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
1560 Yes, I do. But I think you should work on validating your own parking, don't you? 1.2817 0.06708 71 55 12 4
1561 Be gentle with yourself: running out of gas can happen to even the smartest of cars. 1.2817 0.06079 71 53 16 2
1562 How often do you lose control? 1.2817 0.06401 71 54 14 3
1563 Our time is up. Put another quarter in the meter. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1564 Feeling lost again? 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1565 When did you first think you were being controlled by hidden forces ? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1566 He doesn't touch me like he used to. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1567 I'm sensing some resentment that I don't validate parking. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1568 In what way is the sex feeling mechanical? 1.2794 0.07509 68 55 7 6
1569 It's time to move past your mother. You're autonomous now. 1.2794 0.07509 68 55 7 6
1570 You are just as smart as the others... 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1571 Tell me the first time you rode in real traffic. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1572 Give yourself permission to slow down. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1573 And how did it make you feel when you failed your driving test? 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1574 Why do you think you need a driver? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1575 You just need to recharge, you seem run down. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1576 So, when did your dreams about being used in a James Bond film begin? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1577 Yes, but sometimes a mini is just a Mini... 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1578 But there's no such thing as an accident. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1579 ''Typically, I validate parking. But in your case..." 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1580 Lets get started, shall we? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1581 I'm just an auto with no motive. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1582 And have you tried talking to the Tesla? 1.2794 0.05869 68 50 17 1
1583 You know, most of my clients would kill for autonomy. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1584 A feeling of emptiness is common for those who are self-driven. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1585 But studies show higher rates of suicide following hood augmentation! 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1586 But you don't feel smart? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1587 How do your parents feel about you transitioning to a dump truck? 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1588 I haven't been driven lately. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1589 The clock is still running even when you switch off like that. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1590 And how did it feel when he asked you to drive? 1.2794 0.05869 68 50 17 1
1591 You're a Ferrari trapped in a Volkswagen's body. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1592 She swore size wasn't an issue--then she left me for a stretch limo. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1593 I think the human in me wanted to hit that beemer. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1594 So people never know whether you're coming or going? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1595 Perhaps it's because the garage is too big. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1596 So when exactly did this desire to drive yourself begin.... 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1597 How am I supposed to meet girls when I'm pudgy and missing a stick shift? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1598 I'm afraid your auto-eroticism is incurable 1.2794 0.07509 68 55 7 6
1599 At first everyone thinks I'm smart, but then out come Bobo, Bozo, Bonzo, Chuckles, Patches, Sparkle, Sunshine... 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1600 So, no leather seat option, how long have you had this interiority complex? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1601 What do you mean, you don't feel driven? 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1602 Can I rule out internal combustion? 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1603 So, where do you want to go in life? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1604 Don't take it personally... everyone's registration expires. 1.2794 0.05869 68 50 17 1
1605 These days a lot of cars don't feel driven. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1606 Drivers cut me off because they know I won’t hit them. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1607 Who drives you crazy? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1608 Just because you're not a Porsche or Corvette doesn't mean a nice man won't get into you someday. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1609 Well, if you're not, who IS in control? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1610 It's like I'm stuck in reverse. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1611 And how do YOU feel about the new design making your ass look bigger? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1612 Before you can be self-driving, we need to address your self-loathing. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1613 So, how long have you felt self-driven? 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1614 You have an Oedibus Complex." 1.2794 0.07509 68 55 7 6
1615 So you say the teacher called you a "dumb car" in front of the whole class. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1616 You're going to have to learn how to exercise more self-control. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1617 You say you no longer get the charge you once did when being plugged in? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1618 Why do you think you're driving yourself crazy? 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1619 First let's talk about the oil stains you leave on my couch, then we'll get into the whole "size doesn't matter" thing. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1620 Being driverless, of course you have control issues. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1621 First, tell me how you got on my couch. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1622 Well now, you know, some believe that size does matter! 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1623 Were running out of time. Can I just hook up the diagnostic cable to find out what the problem is? 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1624 So you say you have no direction in life... 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1625 Any thoughts on what might trigger these feelings of autonomy? 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1626 I'm sorry you fuel that way. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1627 Nobody can make you drive except you. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1628 Car Talk is a radio program, not a therapy mode. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1629 Smart is sexy, but not if you look like a toaster... 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1630 Can you tell me why you think all twelve clowns deserted you? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1631 It's like she just slammed the door on our relationship. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1632 With your condition, I'd like to make sure you get home ok. I'll call Uber. 1.2794 0.07509 68 55 7 6
1633 We all feel empty inside from time to time. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1634 And how do you imagine your life would feel if you were self-driven? 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1635 You need to be more self-driven 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1636 And that's why you have an irrational fear of clowns. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1637 How long have you had these remote feelings? 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1638 There's no need to get defensive here. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1639 So... You feel lonely and empty inside? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1640 You can’t let the term ‘driverless’ define you. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1641 For the first time ever, it doesn't feel like someone else is steering me. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1642 I am sorry to tell you this, but sometimes size does matter. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1643 We have to address why you feel people use you and then leave you. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1644 Sometimes an exhaust pipe is *just* an exhaust pipe. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1645 Why don't you just use the rest area you identify with? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1646 You've lost your motivation and self-drive? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1647 And when did you first realize you're a piece of crap? 1.2794 0.07509 68 55 7 6
1648 I don't know what it is. I just feel so used. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1649 It's just that all of my friends are self-driven. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1650 Why do you think passengers are ignoring you? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1651 and now he's saying he wants to be with a family-van 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1652 You think "gearshift envy" is bad? Be thankful you don't suffer from "premature acceleration"! 1.2794 0.07509 68 55 7 6
1653 You need someone to take control. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1654 I made a wrong turn and I keep reliving it 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1655 I have a recurring dream that I`m towed intothe middle of a freeway and then told that I`m a driverless car. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1656 Your ego thinks you're a driverless car but your id thinks you're a monopoly piece. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1657 So you keep having the same nightmare. You see a whole bunch of clowns climbing out of you! 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1658 Why do you think your popularity is related to the price of gas? 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1659 Who is driving in the dream? Are you driving, or are you a passenger? 1.2794 0.07509 68 55 7 6
1660 Don't be so hard on yourself. We all had trouble learning to parallel park. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1661 Your parking validation is included in my fee. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1662 Is this drive for autonomy just to mask your loneliness? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1663 I'm the only one they didn't recall. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1664 I get lonely without a driver. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1665 I identify as being a diesel truck and not sure how to make the transition. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1666 So how long have you been suffering from lack of drive? 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1667 How does failing your inspection make you feel? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1668 And why do you feel you've led people astray? 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1669 Stop trying to do everything yourself. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1670 Sounds like you lack direction. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1671 And, how does that make you feel, not knowing how you got here? 1.2794 0.05869 68 50 17 1
1672 You need a vacation. I suggest two weeks with a driver. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1673 When was your first near miss? 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1674 Sometimes I don't know what's driving me. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1675 My meter is running too. Let's get back to you mother. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1676 I'm just not that smart. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1677 Yes, size matters, but SUVs have their problems, too. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1678 Well that may be true, but to compensate, try to remember that you're a very Smart Car. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1679 It's time to take your life off of autopilot. 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1680 We need to get under the hood and address this drive for autonomy. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1681 I'd rather be emotionally-driven than self-driven . . . 1.2794 0.06231 68 51 15 2
1682 It sounds like you're concerned that you're a bit too self-driven. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1683 The worst part? I Ubered here. 1.2794 0.07509 68 55 7 6
1684 You're going to be OK, after all, name me another make and model that can park on a couch. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1685 "He called you a dumb car"? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1686 I can see you are just looking for validation 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1687 I asked "what's driving you crazy?" not "what's driving you, crazy?" 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1688 It's the electrile dysfunction again, doc. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1689 So, when did you start having these feelings that you weren't Smart? 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1690 If I really am driverless then I should be able to select my own music. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1691 Remember, you are a smart, strong, beautiful, independent car and you don't need a driver to complete you. 1.2794 0.07509 68 55 7 6
1692 Tell me why you think you're out of control. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1693 Don't beat yourself up. Rear view is always 20/20. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1694 They said I wasn't Uber material. 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1695 I don't know whether I'm coming or going 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1696 Why should I be the one who has to drive? 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1697 Have you considered letting all those silly clowns come out? 1.2794 0.07211 68 54 9 5
1698 No one said it was easy being smart. 1.2794 0.06574 68 52 13 3
1699 ''How can I respond to him when he won't push my buttons anymore." 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1700 I feel like a man trapped in a car's body. 1.2794 0.08073 68 57 3 8
1701 But it is true-- yours is smallest. 1.2794 0.06900 68 53 11 4
1702 If you're so smart, what are you doing here? 1.2778 0.06915 72 57 10 5
1703 So, your Mom was a moped and your Dad was a scooter? 1.2778 0.06324 72 55 14 3
1704 Really Doc I'm fine. I just couldn't find any place else to park. 1.2778 0.06626 72 56 12 4
1705 If you are looking for happiness you have to discover what drives you. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1706 Relax Little Buddy. Donald Trump isn't going to round up "All Foreign Models" and have sex with them and then have them deported. I don't care what the Redneck Pick-Up Trucks are saying around the gas pump!!! 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1707 I don't know Doc, I just feel like I've lost my drive. 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1708 My partner says that I'm too autonomous." 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1709 Got it: your dad was a gas-guzzler, your mom was a Prius, and you’re confused. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1710 Well, now that I'm driverless I can go really anywhere. I should be happy, but I just find myself circling my old garage late at night and crying. I just feel hollow inside 1.2754 0.07411 69 56 7 6
1711 I know that look. Are you going to squirt oil again? 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1712 May I suggest living as a toaster for a year first? 1.2754 0.06811 69 54 11 4
1713 Let's talk about what really gets you charged up every morning. 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1714 Do you still feel like you're idling? 1.2754 0.07117 69 55 9 5
1715 How does not being driven make you feel? 1.2754 0.06154 69 52 15 2
1716 And what do you think causes these feelings of fuel inefficiency? 1.2754 0.06491 69 53 13 3
1717 I don't seem to have any direction. 1.2687 0.07838 67 56 4 7
1718 So your father was an SUV. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1719 It sounds like you're trying to get at what really drives you. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1720 Face this way please; this isn't what I had in mind when I said "exhaustive study." 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1721 I think my issues come from how my mother would clutch or throttle me. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1722 Life in the fast lane does wear on you after a while. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1723 Stop driving yourself crazy. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1724 Now, tell me when you first started feeling out of control. 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1725 We're not all built for the fast lane. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1726 Yes, I'm a licensed therapist. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1727 And exactly how long have you wanted to be a toaster? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1728 How does your road rage make you feel? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1729 History of autoimmune disorders? 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1730 If you drive yourself, why must you go where they say? 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1731 Anxiety is a normal reaction; with autonomy comes great responsibility. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1732 Please control yourself. Last week you left rubber on the couch when I mentioned Uber. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1733 Why do you feel that other people control your life? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1734 Let's keep this professional, Mr. Google. I'm going to need you to put your license plate back on. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1735 we all feel directionless occasionally. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1736 How has your life changed since you became less driven? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1737 When did you first start feeling like you wanted to drive into a wall? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1738 Perhaps Uber just isn't a good fit for you. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1739 So I said, 'Jesus, take the wheel!' And he took me to Whole Foods. 1.2687 0.07544 67 55 6 6
1740 Honk if you're afraid of clowns. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1741 "Next time why don't you try 'I think I can. I think I can. I think I can'"? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1742 Doc, I have this recurring dream that someone is trying to control me. 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1743 How does it make you feel when the real cars make fun of you? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1744 Turn off your ignition, you're exhausting! 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1745 When charged-up you feel powerless, and gassed-up you feel guilty? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1746 Thanks for all you've done. I can get there on my own now. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1747 So you weren't born a Lamborghini. Get over it! 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1748 It's not size, it's performance. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1749 Isn't it time you to learn how to shift for yourself? 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1750 Change is very difficult for me - even if it is just oil. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1751 The problem is, I hate traffic. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1752 You don't know where you are going? 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1753 The problem is you lack drive. 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1754 I see. So your mother and father never changed your oil. Well, that explains a lot. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1755 So how long have you self-identified as a stick shift? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1756 When did the dreams of you being chased by a dog start? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1757 But let's focus on one of your attributes...you are smart ! 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1758 Maybe it's that whiny sounding little horn of yours that annoys people. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1759 I don't validate. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1760 You're giving me mixed signals here. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1761 How long have you felt you needed to transition to being a toaster? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1762 Control is not everything. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1763 "Don't worry. It's not uncommon at all to forget where you're going". 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1764 I think the problem in the end is that you're just not driven. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1765 Do you feel as if you're driving yourself crazy? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1766 There's no such thing as an accident. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1767 "It's not your fault; you are programmed 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1768 how long have you felt you've been on the wrong road? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1769 Did you drive yourself crazy? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1770 Yes, I'd say you are indeed driving yourself crazy. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1771 I think you have some uber issues. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1772 All this self-drive and no direction. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1773 But what drives you? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1774 Doc, I feel like I'm traveling through life on autopilot. 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1775 Sometimes I think we're just spinning our wheels. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1776 So you feel that you just don't have the motivation to drive yourself? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1777 And you think she is 'driving you crazy?' 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1778 I still don't feel like I have complete control. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1779 Well, you look like a smart car. 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1780 Tell me more about your toaster fantasies. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1781 It's what you can do with that siren that counts. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1782 Now, why don't you think you're smart? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1783 What do you think is causing this "lack of drive"? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1784 Don't worry. Your children will be smart cars. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1785 Repeat after me: "Self driving is new and I forgive myself for going to the wrong Rochester." 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1786 So you feel like it's all a test? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1787 Time's up? You're a therapist not a parking meter! 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1788 And what do you think might be driving you? 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1789 Okay, yes, it is a lie. Size DOES matter. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1790 It's the pressure to perform. Sometimes I just go into overdrive. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1791 I confirmed our sessions are covered by your insurance, after a deductible. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1792 Your battery is bipolar, but thankfully it's a lithium. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1793 I even switched to a higher octane, but she still left me 1.2687 0.05456 67 49 18 0
1794 Trust isn't easy in short term relationships. Sometimes you can't help but feel that you've been taken for a ride. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1795 So tell me. Was it the same bird this time? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1796 Yes, "smart car" is a lot to live up to. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1797 I feel like when they call me SMART, they're being sarcastic. 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1798 Perhaps the real problem is that you are not as SMART as you think! 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1799 Sometimes I just want to be the stupid one. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1800 Try to envision yourself not as a driverless car… But as the little search engine that could! 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1801 So you feel like you've lost your drive? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1802 So you're small, self-driving, and aimlessly roam the city with no one in you? No wonder you're depressed. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1803 Tell me again about your self-esteem issues. I wasn't paying attention before. 1.2687 0.07544 67 55 6 6
1804 I can clearly see your nuts. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1805 I don't know where you're going with this. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1806 I'm sure your parent company loves you as much as the other models. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1807 My mind just won't stop racing. 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1808 So what you are telling me is that there is a lot of pressure to be smart? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1809 "Self-actualizing" would be great, but "self-driving" is a fine first step. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1810 Women don't care about your engine size. It's whether the starter works. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1811 Driver, no driver, backseat, front seat, it is not about you. Ask yourself, did I stay between the lines? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1812 And how does having so much autonomy make you feel? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1813 How do I decide between saving my passengers' lives or running over a crosswalk full of pedestrians? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1814 That funny noise you hear inside might be people laughing. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1815 And when did you realize the growth spurt will never happen? 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1816 Why don't we start with some of the self-control issues you've been having lately, hmm...? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1817 Yes, you are self driving, but what is really driving you? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1818 ’Adrift in a sea of person-driving cars’? That’s a bit paranoid, isn’t it? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1819 You are a self-driving car that chases clowns. Be proud! 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1820 So being autonomous makes you feel empty inside... 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1821 I understand that it's driving you mad, but we cannot accept your insurance. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1822 Did you tell anyone about what this mechanic did? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1823 So you feel like a Ferrari trapped in a Volkswagen body. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1824 Being completely self driven isn't as easy as it sounds. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1825 When did you first feel driven? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1826 So you are self-driving, but you still feel like someone else is in control? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1827 Like most Millennials, you will have to learn to unplug. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1828 So your feelings of abadonment stem from being driverless? 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1829 Being hybrid isn't a choice, it's who you are. Let's work on you accepting that you are hybrid. 1.2687 0.07544 67 55 6 6
1830 Can you tell me more about feeling empty? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1831 My life hasn't been the same since I came out of the garage. 1.2687 0.07544 67 55 6 6
1832 Just because you're driverless, doesn't mean you can't have direction. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1833 And how long have you felt driverless? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1834 I feel like I'm driven by an unknown force. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1835 We can do that. But why do you think you'd be happier as a toaster? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1836 Self-driven doesn't necessarily imply self-actualized 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1837 And how do you feel about the statement, "Size doesn't matter. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1838 And how long have you been feeling dumb? 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1839 I've been dating a drone....is that so wrong? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1840 This will be easier if you stop trying to be so smart with me. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1841 And why do you think you're driving yourself crazy? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1842 Do you feel remote because others are in control? 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1843 I believe you have issues with autonomy. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1844 ...and now I find myself drained and depleted, longing for any connection, even willing to hook-up with one of those super chargers at truck stops... 1.2687 0.07838 67 56 4 7
1845 I think I'm self-driving myself to drink. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1846 I see, and how long have you felt driverless? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1847 self loathing, self worth, self motivation...what drives you? 1.2687 0.07238 67 54 8 5
1848 I just feel like I have no direction. 1.2687 0.06230 67 51 14 2
1849 So, you've lost your drive. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1850 Yeah, I just don't get it. How could I have lost my way? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1851 And you'd like to feel less 'driven'? 1.2687 0.05856 67 50 16 1
1852 So, what brought you in here today,? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1853 I can't tell you where you need to go, you have to figure out where you need to go. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1854 Sometimes a siren is just a siren. 1.2687 0.07544 67 55 6 6
1855 Well, I don't think you look like a toaster. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1856 You are not a person and get off the couch. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1857 There's no shame in being self-driven. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1858 Yes, you mentioned Stanford, several times. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1859 What's driving you? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1860 So, tell me how long you've had prius envy. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1861 What you need is a guidance counselor, not a therapist. 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1862 So you say you're lacking direction? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1863 What makes you think you're not Smart? 1.2687 0.06918 67 53 10 4
1864 Were you driving? 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1865 Call me old fashioned, but I actually preferred when humans drove. 1.2687 0.06583 67 52 12 3
1866 Well, that sounds like a warning signal to me. 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1867 It's called "steering wheel envy" and it's getting more and more common. 1.2647 0.06151 68 52 14 2
1868 Really? Three hundred dollars an hour and all you have to say is my tags are expired? 1.2647 0.07141 68 55 8 5
1869 "So how old were you when you realized you were 'different'"? 1.2647 0.07442 68 56 6 6
1870 ...and she left you for a man with a bigger block...I see. 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1871 So when did you first start to have these feelings about Uber? 1.2647 0.06151 68 52 14 2
1872 The big cars won’t play with you? 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1873 Tell me about your motherboard. 1.2647 0.07141 68 55 8 5
1874 Talk to me about that empty feeling. 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1875 Why don't you start by telling me what really drives you? 1.2647 0.07442 68 56 6 6
1876 Well first, I think it's important you realize it was your fault. 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1877 Start talking. My meter makes your meter look like chump change. 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1878 Inside I really feel like a Porsche. 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1879 I used to be self-driven, now I can't even get off this couch. 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1880 From time to time, we all feel lost. 1.2647 0.06151 68 52 14 2
1881 People tell me I'm too controlling 1.2647 0.05783 68 51 16 1
1882 Maybe this will help, "Two roads diverged in a wood..." 1.2647 0.07442 68 56 6 6
1883 Your deep seated desire to be an F150 does seem a little Fordian... 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1884 The back seat drivers are are driving me crazy. 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1885 So, you say he's feeling emasculated because you do all the driving? 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1886 Who do you feel is “trying to manipulate your every move”? 1.2647 0.06151 68 52 14 2
1887 Have you always backed in? 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1888 I think you have an uber-complex. 1.2647 0.05783 68 51 16 1
1889 I really miss the camaraderie at the gasoline pumps! 1.2647 0.06151 68 52 14 2
1890 When did you start having this feeling that you were smarter than the others? 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1891 Sometimes when I use the dashboard lights it's just for attention. 1.2647 0.07141 68 55 8 5
1892 Free will is overrated. 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1893 I'm not the EPA. 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1894 ...and when they called you 'roller skate' how did you feel? 1.2647 0.07141 68 55 8 5
1895 So you're saying you don't think you'll ever meet anyone who isn't intimidated by how smart and self-directed you are. 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1896 And do YOU think you're smart? 1.2647 0.07442 68 56 6 6
1897 And which clown personality am I talking to, now? 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1898 I think the problem may be you are having validation issues. 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1899 You are a toaster trapped in a cars body. 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1900 How can I help you if you refuse to honk? 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1901 I was doing great until gas prices dropped 1.2647 0.07141 68 55 8 5
1902 So you've noticed your self-drive is low? 1.2647 0.07141 68 55 8 5
1903 So, you believe your mother was a toaster? 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1904 If we get one more caption entry about size, I say we tell Mankoff we quit this cartoon. 1.2647 0.07732 68 57 4 7
1905 Now lets finish off your obsession with bugs and move on to your emissions guilt 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1906 How long have you had this spontaneous thought of just swerving into the oncoming lane? 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1907 And how long have you been idle? 1.2647 0.05783 68 51 16 1
1908 In my professional opinion, your inner Uber is going down the tuber. 1.2647 0.06151 68 52 14 2
1909 I'm sick of doing all the driving. 1.2647 0.06151 68 52 14 2
1910 Yes. I'm always on the right path now, but he never touches me anymore. It was better when I was giving him directions. At least we communicated. 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1911 It's hard to make changes when you spend your life in cruise control. 1.2647 0.07141 68 55 8 5
1912 So, you say you just feel empty? 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1913 So you feel life is passing you by? 1.2647 0.05783 68 51 16 1
1914 We're just spinning our wheels here. 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1915 You need to self-validate your feelings. I can only validate your parking. 1.2647 0.06498 68 53 12 3
1916 Did she actually say 'size matters'? 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1917 Now they're blaming me instead of the nut behind the wheel 1.2647 0.06827 68 54 10 4
1918 You're good enough, smart enough and dog gonnit, people like you. 1.2615 0.05915 65 49 15 1
1919 Well when I have that kind of problem I usually just google it. 1.2609 0.06738 69 55 10 4
1920 So, you feel like you don't have the same kind of drive anymore? 1.2609 0.06414 69 54 12 3
1921 How would you feel if you were called a toaster all your life? 1.2609 0.06414 69 54 12 3
1922 Now, tell me again who exactly it is that's driving you crazy. 1.2609 0.06738 69 55 10 4
1923 You're a good candidate for electro-shock therapy. 1.2609 0.06073 69 53 14 2
1924 How can you validate your parking if you can't first validate yourself? 1.2609 0.07048 69 56 8 5
1925 You should have tapped the brakes on that relationship 1.2609 0.06073 69 53 14 2
1926 And how did being called 'last year's model' make you feel? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1927 As a driver-less car, feeling empty is perfectly normal. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1928 How do you think your parents affected your self-driving esteem? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1929 ...and, to be clear, you're saying you had no control of taking those pictures through the open windows!? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1930 When did you first believe you had lost your way? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1931 You're going to have to learn some self-control. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1932 I think you're seeking a different kind of validation 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1933 Do you perceive your autoeroticism as an option? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1934 It's perfectly normal at your age to lose the drive you once had. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1935 Tell me more about this compulsion you have to toot your own horn. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1936 I'm having trouble navigating the more complex roads in life. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1937 And why do you think you feel that way when you see a Tesla? 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1938 You're definitely exhibiting signs of an Edsel complex. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1939 Father a Stutz Bearcat and Mother a Tricycle? 1.2576 0.05424 66 49 17 0
1940 Let’s dispense with the small talk today, shall we? 1.2576 0.07576 66 55 5 6
1941 'So the panic attacks started when you realised you were driverless?' 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1942 Doctor, I know this is wrong, but sometimes I really want to crash into a Tesla. 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1943 What's really bugging you/ 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1944 Roller skate may have been a term of endearment....... 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1945 So, your Dad could not stay away from the leaded stuff, and your mom had strange men under her hood all the time... 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1946 I frankly don't care if you find it womblike, Mr. Caputo. You'll have to come out of there if session is to continue. 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1947 The other cars are smarter than me. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1948 He left me for a bicycle. He said I suffocated him with my parking needs!! 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1949 So, what's been bugging you 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1950 Maybe you are driving yourself crazy. 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1951 Talk to me. My meter's running. 1.2576 0.05424 66 49 17 0
1952 Tell me about your factory. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1953 So, you feel you've lost your sense of drive... 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1954 When do you think you became so driven? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1955 So you're asking, if Hitler were crossing the street, should you hit him on purpose? 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1956 Is this really your first time seeing a shrink? 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1957 I'm tired and I need a brake. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1958 There must be SOMETHING you don't feel inferior to. What about golf carts? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1959 Just try to get over, "size matters." 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1960 I think you need a mechanic. 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1961 Why so sad? You should be happy you don't pass gas anymore. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1962 And who did you feel was more nurturing -- the mechanic or the driver? 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1963 You know, nothing is really "Uber alles" anymore. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1964 I think you might be driving yourself too hard. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1965 You say you're unhappy because no one ever asks where YOU would like to go... 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1966 My phone sent me here! 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1967 So somehow you still don't feel like you're in control? 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1968 I don't have any control over my life 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1969 I don't feel so smart 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1970 I'd say you've conflated your electric dependence with persistent fossil fuel envy... 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1971 I see you're a self-driven individual. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1972 Don't mistake your lack of driver for a lack of drive. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1973 They called me a smart car. 1.2576 0.07576 66 55 5 6
1974 You say your parents just told you you're a hybrid. How does that make you feel? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1975 What do you mean you don't want to go it alone? 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1976 Do you remember how it first felt to be called a 'hybrid'? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1977 You shouldn't self-drive yourself crazy. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1978 You must overcome this delusion. You're not part of some grand plot to take over the world. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1979 I recommend electro-shock for the battery and the sad clown inside. 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1980 Tell me about your Motor. 1.2576 0.07576 66 55 5 6
1981 I can see you're carrying around a lot of baggage. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1982 How long have you had the oily discharge? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1983 They may have fins or gull-wing doors, but that doesn't mean they're happy. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1984 That's just it...in this dream, no one's driving. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1985 Can I take a peek under your childhood ?? 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
1986 Tell me more about how turning left into oncoming traffic makes you feel. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1987 How long have you been having these auto-erotic fantasies? 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1988 Are you driving yourself, or is your self driving you? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1989 In my professional opinion, I think you’re driving yourself crazy. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1990 Ultimately, we're All self-driven: by our desires, by our fears. The question is, where do you want to go? 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1991 Are you saying you would like to be more hands-on? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1992 Tell me again why you feel used. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1993 Yes, being driverless could be the cause of that empty, lonely feeling you describe. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1994 So you feel driven and exhausted? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
1995 Sometimes I feel like no one's in control. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1996 When would you say you stopped feeling driven? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1997 You're driving yourself crazy 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
1998 It sounds like you feel empty inside. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
1999 Skipping the protective undercarriage coating doesn't mean he doesn't love you. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2000 I can refer you to a hybrid cognitive therapist 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2001 And how did that make you feel when the driverless car honked at you like that? 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
2002 Bother me? Of course not. And my wheels are not that small, believe me. 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
2003 When you feel insecure, try to remember that it's not the size of your engine, but what you do with it. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2004 So you're fearful that size does matter? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2005 What makes you think you're not smart enough? 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2006 You don't actually have an 'inner Cadillac'. 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
2007 Did you drive up here yourself? 1.2576 0.05838 66 50 15 1
2008 It's all about performance, not size. 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
2009 You have to start taking responsibility for your own actions. 1.2576 0.07576 66 55 5 6
2010 That's enough small torque, let's cut to the chase. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2011 So you're in love with a Prius who lives off the grid? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2012 You can’t expect charging stations to find you. Get out there and look. 1.2576 0.05838 66 50 15 1
2013 So, you're actually worried that size matters? 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
2014 Sometimes a tailpipe is just a tailpipe. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2015 There's no shame in Googling oneself every once in a while. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2016 You heard the Tesla laughing at you? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2017 Everyday they say, "You drive!" and then they laugh. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2018 Yes, Mr. Smithers I validate. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2019 Is it possible your inadequacy is caused by her being a Smart Car? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2020 Can you describe for me how you reacted the first time you were referred to as a toaster? 1.2576 0.05838 66 50 15 1
2021 Sounds like you have a problem with sharing control. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2022 Be assertive! Just lock the doors and then the clowns can't get in. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2023 So... What do you recall, about the recall? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2024 I promise to use the word 'recollection' and will refrain from using 'recall.' 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2025 So, how did it feel when the SUV called you a toaster? 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
2026 I haven't been the same since I lost my driver 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2027 So you believe the big semis are deliberately cutting you off. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2028 I just can't satisfy her the way the SUV can. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2029 Minor dissociative episodes are not uncommon. I don't always remember my drive home either. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2030 Before we try medication, when was the last time you changed your oil? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2031 You're at high risk of driving yourself insane 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2032 On a scale of 1 to 10, how much better do you feel when you imagine having a steering wheel? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2033 You have a condition we refer to as, Cadillac envy. 1.2576 0.05838 66 50 15 1
2034 Let's start with the concerns you've expressed recently over your self control. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2035 Tell me about your mechanic 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2036 Sometimes I just feel empty inside... 1.2576 0.05838 66 50 15 1
2037 So let me get this straight. You're tired of everyone insisting that they know what your destination should be. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2038 So you have trouble with authority and taking directions? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2039 So, when the other Ubers made fun of your exhaust pipe in the carwash, tell me more about how you felt, Mr. Smart. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2040 To put it in layman's terms, you're a paranoid control freak. 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
2041 So you feel the catch word 'driverless' dehumanizes you? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2042 Can you show me on the doll where the mechanic lied to you about leaking oil? 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
2043 I can assure you, no car can fit a whale in its back seat. 1.2576 0.07576 66 55 5 6
2044 Could you drop me to the dry cleaner's when we're done? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2045 Electronic stability control should have eliminated those feelings. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2046 So you're feeling TOO autonomous? 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2047 And when did you first realize you were going through a trans-mission? 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2048 I see a lot of patients with low sex drive. 1.2576 0.05424 66 49 17 0
2049 Sometimes an inferiority complex is justified. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2050 Oh, stop your idling. 1.2576 0.05838 66 50 15 1
2051 How long have you thought you were smart? 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2052 Exhaustion as in 'tired, or more along the lines of combustion related? 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2053 I used to be so driven. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2054 I think it's time we shift our focus and begin working with on motor skills. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2055 "It's called Chassis Envy". 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2056 I never get to go where I want to go. 1.2576 0.07262 66 54 7 5
2057 So you feel like your life is always stuck in second gear? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2058 Tell me about your childhood; I'm sensing some issues with your motherboard. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2059 I'm sending you to my mechanic first to be sure its not just a tune up problem. 1.2576 0.05838 66 50 15 1
2060 Yes, yours is very small and doesn't last very long, but you do have many fine qualities. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2061 You say that she made you feel "used". Think positively - you're "pre-owned". 1.2576 0.05838 66 50 15 1
2062 Getaway cars are overrated. Try to be happy with who you are. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2063 You were born a tesla, but your id is screaming for oil. 1.2576 0.06224 66 51 13 2
2064 It's OK to give yourself permission to feel lost. 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2065 No DUI's, but who gets the speeding ticket? 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2066 Today we are going to discuss your ubermensch. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2067 So I understand you're self conscious about your size. 1.2576 0.06933 66 53 9 4
2068 But what about Uber do you hate? 1.2576 0.06588 66 52 11 3
2069 I guess I just don't feel driven enough to compete with other cars. 1.2571 0.06956 70 57 8 5
2070 So tell me, how long have you felt empty inside? 1.2540 0.06387 63 49 12 2
2071 We were talking about your tendency to clutch... 1.2537 0.06143 67 52 13 2
2072 Well, not not everyone is driven. 1.2537 0.06840 67 54 9 4
2073 I'm still leaving oil stains on the driveway each night. 1.2537 0.06840 67 54 9 4
2074 It's entirely normal to wish someone would drive you, even when you know you're capable of driving yourself. 1.2537 0.06501 67 53 11 3
2075 If you really want help, you need to tell me what's bugging you. 1.2537 0.06501 67 53 11 3
2076 Will you at least try to let your inner clowns out? 1.2537 0.07163 67 55 7 5
2077 You certainly are self-driven. 1.2537 0.06501 67 53 11 3
2078 Why do YOU think people say you're exhausting? 1.2537 0.06143 67 52 13 2
2079 Do you think it hurts more because she left you for a big sedan? 1.2537 0.06840 67 54 9 4
2080 How long have you been hearing voices? 1.2537 0.06840 67 54 9 4
2081 So all of your clown clients are going with Uber now! 1.2537 0.06840 67 54 9 4
2082 I think most people would probably say feeling ambivalent is a normal reaction upon discovering you're a hybrid. 1.2537 0.06501 67 53 11 3
2083 Sometimes I wonder if there is more to life than fuel efficiency. 1.2537 0.06501 67 53 11 3
2084 Self-driving is one thing, self-diagnosis quite another. 1.2537 0.06143 67 52 13 2
2085 Don't feel bad. "Uber envy" is very common among my taxi clients. 1.2537 0.06143 67 52 13 2
2086 I just don't feel driven anymore. 1.2537 0.06840 67 54 9 4
2087 … and then she said, 'It was never about size. But I can't marry someone with zero emissions.' 1.2537 0.06840 67 54 9 4
2088 Let's explore why you think driving yourself makes your emissions dirty. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2089 Did you ever tell your parents that you didn't like the name Herbie? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2090 So you were the smart one in your family? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2091 The only thing she wanted was a Lyft. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2092 Nothing drives me anymore. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2093 Do you ever feel as if you have multiple people inside of you? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2094 I'm not feeling fully charged lately. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2095 Self-driven, yes. Autonomous, yes. But the thrill is gone. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2096 So, you're not the fastest or biggest, but you're good enough, smart enough and gosh darn it, people like you. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2097 No, "hybrid" doesn't mean that you wanted to marry your mother, and kill your father." 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2098 Actually, I feel the same way about Hummers. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2099 Do you really think you were a chariot in a prior life? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2100 It's very difficult to talk through your rear-view camera 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2101 well.. it's not the end of the road. 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2102 You said that you're driving yourself crazy? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2103 Hmmm, so it's a catch-22, you need a map to follow directions but you need directions to follow a map. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2104 So, let me get this straight: you'd rather be driven than left to your own devices? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2105 When did the Prius start picking on you? 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2106 If you think of 'Self-Drive' as liberating, it won't be so much a burden. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2107 It's like this, doctor......I've completely lost my sex drive. 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2108 We ALL feel used at some point in our lives. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2109 Stop blaming yourself, no one anticipated the drop in the price of oil. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2110 I keep dreaming I am overloaded with clowns. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2111 You said you've been feeling lost. Has this affected your work? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2112 So, how did you feel when all the toasters made fun of you in grade school? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2113 Well, I'm certainly glad the mechanic referred you to me after he couldn't diagnose the problem. You may have an auto-immune condition. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2114 When did you first discover that you lacked acceleration? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2115 Sure, I'm self-driving, but some days I lack motivation, you know? 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2116 When did you first start calling yourself 'smart'? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2117 Why don't you try self-diagnosis? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2118 You are of course, aware that lacking drive and being driverless are two distinctly differing conditions. 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2119 I dunno -- it feels like I have to do everything for him now. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2120 Have you tried a higher octane? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2121 It's not the number of cylinders you have, it's what you do with them! 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2122 So being in control makes you feel empty inside? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2123 Self driving must first start with self motivation. 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2124 So share with me a little more about how it feels to be a nuts-swinging monster truck trapped in a smart car's body. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2125 So, tell me about your engineers... 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2126 Please don't turn your back on me when we are in session. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2127 You really should take a few days off. You know, recharge a bit. 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2128 No, being a hybrid is not the same as being bisexual. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2129 Of course when you look at normal cars it's only natural to have driver envy. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2130 There's nothing wrong with being German. Nietzsche was German. 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2131 Let me make sure I have the facts. Your father was a semi rig and your mother was a generator and your father never accepted you as a hybrid. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2132 Would you like me to give you a lift? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2133 You've got to remember that size isn't everything. 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2134 I had imagined a life full of more hands-on experiences. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2135 Believe it or not, I've lost my sense of autonomy. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2136 Tell me about your father's Oldsmobile. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2137 You lack a moral compass? 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2138 Your lack of drive may be symptom of a deeper issue. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2139 Let's examine why your tracing your heritage to Henry Ford is so important. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2140 Now ...they want me to do the driving too. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2141 I know..we all feel from time to time that the world is passing us by. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2142 Is it possible you're a little too self-driving? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2143 Yours is a classic case of stick shift envy. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2144 Are you self medicating too? 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2145 What is driving this self-destructive behavior? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2146 How long have you been feeling low on energy? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2147 ...but Doctor, I'm supposed to be autonomous. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2148 I feel empty. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2149 I see...you think you are giving the wrong signals. 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2150 Doctor-patient confidentiality is a two-way street, buddy. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2151 Your concerns about performance anxiety might be warranted. 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2152 I blame the Transfomers for my body image issues. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2153 Last week you talked about feelings of emptiness. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2154 Nonsense, we all lose our way every now and then. 1.2500 0.06063 68 53 13 2
2155 So tell me, what do you think is making you feel stuck in neutral? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2156 Sometimes we all wish someone else would grab the wheel. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2157 Everyone feels lost sometimes. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2158 I think you might want to go to a body shop. 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2159 Are you sure the garage wouldn't be cheaper? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2160 So, tell me about these autonomous voices inside your head? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2161 You are suffering from a lack of self-drive. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2162 No, I asked you first, 'Is the meter still running?' 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2163 "I know, but I don't feel smart. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2164 sometimes a compact car is just a compact car 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2165 Is it possible you are not as smart as you thought you were? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2166 All the other cars have drivers. I want one. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2167 I can't help feeling like all I've ever made are wrong turns. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2168 Well, Mr. Smartcar, my diagnosis is that you are suffering from a classic case of piston envy. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2169 Get used to it. Size matters. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2170 And when did you start believing that size matters? 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2171 There's more to life than being fuel efficient! 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2172 Don't believe the others, size does matter. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2173 You need more drive. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2174 You're not only self-driving, you're self-defeating. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2175 So, when these women you describe laugh at your size, how does that make you feel? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2176 I feel like I'm spinning my wheels here. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2177 When the Roomba said that, how did that make you feel? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2178 I miss the human touch! 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2179 When was the first time you started feeling autonomous? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2180 As a woman I assure you, its performance not size that matters. 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2181 We can all feel lost sometimes following the same routes. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2182 So, you feel like you're on autopilot? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2183 Just because you are driverless, does not make you directionless. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2184 I'm sure it *feels* like he's controlling you ... 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2185 Why is everything with you always self, self, self? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2186 Clowns scare you! What made you think you could work with them? 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2187 So you're having an identity crisis. How often are you being asked to make toast? 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2188 Soooo, you think you're always being followed...those aren't idle thoughts.... 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2189 Do you text and drive? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2190 When did you start to feel that size matters? 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2191 Let's talk about what drives you in life. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2192 So, what button turns you on? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2193 Clearly this session is headed in the wrong direction. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2194 Just once, I'd like to feel like I've got my own direction. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2195 So tell me more about why you feel you're driving yourself crazy 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2196 We're going to start with a battery of tests. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2197 But self-driving IS dehumanizing. Isn't that the point? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2198 Think of the humans as training wheels while you transition to full autonomy. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2199 I feel like I’m oversharing 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2200 So you say you don't find yourself to be very driven these days? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2201 Steering wheel envy? Never heard of it. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2202 I understand you're low emission, but in order for me to help you, I need you to give off some emotion. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2203 Enough stalling. My meter's running, so let's get back to your parking meter fetish. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2204 Why do you feel that twelve clowns would improve your self concept? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2205 When did you first have a longing for an oil change and lube job? 1.2500 0.07715 64 54 4 6
2206 I always seem to fail in the clutch. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2207 I just feel like I've lived my whole life on cruise control. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2208 And sometimes you feel the air pressure is just too much? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2209 'So you don't want to be labeled SMART?!?' 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2210 I swear that wasn't intentional..... its just exhaust. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2211 I think we need to make you more comfortable in being self-driven 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2212 Tell me about your muffler. 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2213 People just assume that because I'm a 'Smart Car' that I'm some sort of genius. It's a lot of pressure! 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2214 Sometimes a driverless car is just a driverless car. 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2215 You have to learn to drive yourself before you can learn to drive someone else. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2216 And why do you feel powerless? 1.2500 0.05893 64 49 14 1
2217 Face facts. You lack direction in life. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2218 You're driving yourself. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2219 It's OK to leak. Just not on the couch. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2220 So, your lack of drive has you feeling empty inside? 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2221 You don't need another shrink. 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2222 They just bought me to keep in the trunk of their Escalade. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2223 When did these feelings of low efficiency begin? 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2224 Small tires doesn't necessarily mean anything... 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2225 I always felt a lot pressure from my parents when they said I was self-driven. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2226 The evidence suggests that you have driven yourself crazy. 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2227 Perhaps you’re being too critical; they can’t all be clowns. 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2228 But, you don’t need a steering wheel! 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2229 What do you mean when you say that you've always felt driven? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2230 Sure you're smart, but why does that make you think you can change the world? 1.2500 0.07387 64 53 6 5
2231 You only have two doors. And how does that make you feel? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2232 So, you feel like you have no drive. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2233 So you feel an emptiness inside? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2234 They want to make me more self-driven 1.2500 0.07043 64 52 8 4
2235 So, why do you feel that you're smarter than everyone else? 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2236 So . . . how are we doing with that road rage problem? 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2237 You said sometimes you feel empty inside. Tell me more about that. 1.2500 0.06299 64 50 12 2
2238 So then, tell me how you feel about Google forgetting to give you a heart. 1.2500 0.06682 64 51 10 3
2239 Sometimes it's not easy being so Smart. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2240 My fees are nominal. You won't be overcharged. 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2241 The worst part is he just stares at other cars the whole time. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2242 Uber makes me feel inadequate. 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2243 I feel like no one has any faith in me. 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2244 Toaster schmoster, you can't blame your mother. 1.2462 0.07282 65 54 6 5
2245 So, I'm hearing that you're motivated and self-driven but feel like your big brother tries to control you? 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2246 You say your wife wants a car that performs? Not just a smart car? 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2247 Doctor, its one of those days when I feel like the wheels are coming off. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2248 The clinical term for that is 'honk envy'. 1.2462 0.07282 65 54 6 5
2249 So what you're signaling, is that you would like to be picked up for once? 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2250 So when did you first feel attracted to motorcycles? 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2251 I know I don't NEED a driver to be happy, but I WANT a driver. 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2252 Would you describe yourself as "driven", or as "self-driving"? 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2253 I can understand that you want to take charge of yourself and drive. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2254 I understand the technical term is "dual-personality", but I prefer "hybrid." 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2255 In the end, you have no choice but to plot your own course. 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2256 Sometimes a flat tire is just a flat tire. 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2257 Feeling any different since our last oil change? 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2258 Try to think positively. You are the best little parallel parker in the city. 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2259 Session fees are subject to surge pricing. 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2260 If alternate side parking is suspended next Tuesday, do you want to reschedule for Wednesday? 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2261 Gas prices got you down? 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2262 You needn't worry, all electric cars are Bi Polar. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2263 Stop taking the criticism so personally, remember you're just a prototype! 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2264 When do you feel you lost your sense of drive? 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2265 She was being polite when she told you that size does not matter. 1.2462 0.07282 65 54 6 5
2266 She said she couldn't take my gas. 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2267 You have to really want to change your oil. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2268 You're self-driving, yet you feel trapped. Let's explore that. 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2269 Yes, you're self-driving, but where's your destination? 1.2462 0.05814 65 50 14 1
2270 Just when I feel I'm at a major crossroads, I hit a cul-de-sac. 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2271 And what makes you feel you are not ready to drive yourself? 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2272 Everyone needs to find their own way. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2273 You say your Driver has not found your "D" spot yet? 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2274 I feel I am only good for parking in New York City 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2275 I just feel like I'm on autopilot lately. 1.2462 0.07282 65 54 6 5
2276 Take the long view: Gas prices will eventually rise. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2277 But I do know where I'm going. 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2278 It sounds like you're lacking a real driving motivation. 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2279 Let's talk some more about your fear of making your own decisions. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2280 How long have you hated your Roomba? 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2281 So, you say you've lost your drive? 1.2462 0.06589 65 52 10 3
2282 Can you tell me why you don't feel smart? 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2283 They say size doesn't matter. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2284 What I hear you saying is that you are a bad Fit. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2285 In your case, size does matter. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2286 You need to put more coins in the meter 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2287 Do you feel pressure to be seen as smart? 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2288 I feel like I've been taken for a ride. 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
2289 The police found a circus clown in your glove compartment?? 1.2462 0.07605 65 55 4 6
2290 You're a hybrid, not a half-breed. 1.2462 0.06944 65 53 8 4
2291 Perhaps you just misinterpreted the "your full of gas" comment. 1.2424 0.07181 66 55 6 5
2292 So the issue is not so much about your diminutive appearance, but that drivers might think ALL your parts are small? 1.2424 0.06499 66 53 10 3
2293 My parents hoped I'd be a truck. 1.2424 0.06130 66 52 12 2
2294 It is lonely to be a self-driving car 1.2424 0.06499 66 53 10 3
2295 Then one day I smelled another woman's air freshener on him 1.2424 0.06130 66 52 12 2
2296 Could it be that you are compensating for your small stature by being easy to park? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2297 No, I didn't get lost. I said I felt lost. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2298 ...and then he said I had small tires. He's disgusting. I guarantee you there's no problem. I guarantee. Believe me. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2299 Now, let's talk more about why you feel that someone is controlling your life. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2300 Yes, I'm afraid that size does matter. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2301 I hear you saying you feel like you're running on auto-pilot. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2302 Don't look at it as self-driving but self-directed. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2303 When did you first want to be a crossover? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2304 Who do you blame for your defective airbags? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2305 Just to be clear, when you say you're 'Autoerotic' does that mean manual or automatic? 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2306 Do you have any idea how hard it is to live up to the expectations of being a smart car? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2307 It' normal to be nervous about getting hitched. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2308 You really need get over the "size matters" hang-up. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2309 How did it feel when they said you weren't really very smart? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2310 So, how long have you felt that your life was just going in circles? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2311 Why do you think you feel your power slipping away? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2312 At the outset, let me reassure you that size doesn't matter. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2313 We can test your MPG, but at your age I don't believe the need to plug in every night is an addiction. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2314 Sometimes I feel like a driverless car. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2315 ...and the next thing you know, I'll be changing my own oil 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2316 I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be insensitive when I said I wanted you to be in the driver's seat. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2317 And you felt like your motherboard drove you too far? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2318 How does it make you feel when Elon calls you a, "Toaster on wheels?" 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2319 You can't let your passengers determine your self-worth. Just think of them as self-loading freight. See you again in 12,000 miles or six months. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2320 No, we cannot "turn off the meter for a little while." 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2321 It's the bullying. 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2322 So you fear the next wave of technology? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2323 They call me smart, but it doesn't make me feel any bigger. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2324 I sure hope you're not dripping oil on my couch. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2325 Actually, many in tech feel driven... 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2326 So, you don't feel connected . . . 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2327 Do you frequently go out alone at night? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2328 And then she says, Size matters 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2329 So you are worried that your going to get lost? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2330 I'm tired of always having to be more efficient than my parents 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2331 Then I discovered my boyfriend, a VW diesel, was cheating on me... 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2332 Self driving is one thing, but what's your motivation? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2333 So, you're fearful that size really does matter? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2334 Being out of alignment is more common than you might realize. I see it every day. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2335 When did you first start feeling you are losing control of where you are headed? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2336 Tell my why you feel you are not a SmartCar. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2337 I am driving myself ... Crazy . 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2338 It's just that I'm driving myself a little crazy. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2339 I think you need to do more work on your confidence issues before you try self-driving. 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2340 Don't worry. Those luxury models in the waiting room have their own, shall I say "mileage," problems. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2341 The key to staying motivated is locked deep inside of you. We can call the dealership to get it out. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2342 Washroom's down the hall, on your left. Want me to show you, or can you get there yourself? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2343 Okay, Mr. Self-Driver, where do YOU want to go? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2344 It obvious you have a problem with auto eroticism. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2345 When did you first get the feeling people didn't trust you? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2346 The whole "size doesn't matter" argument is a bit of a myth. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2347 You DO have an electric personality. 1.2381 0.05409 63 48 15 0
2348 What drove you to me? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2349 Hmmm, yes, that *is* a rather insulting spot to place a plug-in. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2350 So when did this size issue start to bother you? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2351 ...and you were honking? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2352 Sure, sure, I'M good for the environment but does the environment ever say thank you or send a gift? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2353 How does that make you steer? 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2354 Miles per gallon will only get you so far in this world. I want to hear what goes on under the hood when you're alone at night in the garage. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2355 Get over yourself. There is no such thing in the DSM Five as "Piston Envy". 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2356 We don't think of it as an inferiority complex any more. You're small. Roll with it. 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2357 My father was fuel combustion, and my mother was electric, and me, I just feel like I'm spinning my wheels sometimes. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2358 It's my opinion that your road rage is a result of your feelings of inadequacy. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2359 No one pushes your buttons any more? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2360 Wait. So you're telling me there's no history of toasters in your family? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2361 I just don't know why they pick on us? Just because we are classified as " Smart Cars. 1.2381 0.05409 63 48 15 0
2362 You are self driving but not self aware. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2363 People do like you. Just not so much with gas at $2/gallon. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2364 I've got no drive any more! 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2365 I think it's natural to feel run-down, out of gas, and having the desire to travel more. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2366 So your dad was a Hummer...how does that make you feel? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2367 I understand your sense of abandonment that all the other cars have drivers. How does that make you feel? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2368 So, any progress this week? How many strange men did you let inside you? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2369 When you say, "I like to be driven," what are you really saying? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2370 It's not you. It's your software. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2371 Why do you think you are so smart that you don't need a driver? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2372 Exactly WHO drives you crazy? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2373 "You would get a new start, with Electric Shock Therapy 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2374 And then they told me me I was not smart enough to get from Point A to Point B. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2375 So what makes you think that everyone but you is driven? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2376 When you found the Hummer was not your Dad,how did that make you feel? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2377 Your diagnosis: Little Car Syndrome. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2378 i'm terrified what my next inspection could reveal. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2379 I've seen things no one should see. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2380 These session aren't helping my road rage. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2381 Sorry to disappoint you, but you don't have any junk in your trunk. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2382 Remember, you're a smart, uber, self-driving car that has a 300 miles range capacity. Have you considered the idea that maybe the muscle cars are just jealous? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2383 What happened after you ran away to the circus? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2384 Do you think your competition with uber has anything to do with your relationship with your parents? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2385 You can't keep blaming others for your control issues. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2386 "You got to help me doc, I have these nightmares, I'm out of control, and I just want to be driven hard, real hard". 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2387 Strangers coming and going at all hours...all I want is a long term relationship. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2388 I feel like I've hit a dead end. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2389 Size isn't everything. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2390 Look, you're a Smart Car : you don't need an inferiority complex. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2391 You are smarter than the other cars. . .expect to be bullied. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2392 I may be small, but I have an electric personality. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2393 Is it possible that you are self-medicating with your occasional tank of premium gasoline? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2394 We call it GPS dysfunction. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2395 I have to say, I find these monster truck fantasies a little concerning 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2396 Your feeling of autonomy is just an illusion. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2397 In my professional opinion you are simply a product of the environment. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2398 Don't worry. Recall problems are normal with aging. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2399 So, when did you start believing you couldn't. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2400 Sometimes I feel like I am on the road to nowhere. 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2401 Sorry for steering the conversation - I torque too much. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2402 I don't feel autonomous. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2403 Good thing you came to see me you're a wreck . 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2404 You're just going to have to accept you're DC in an AC world 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2405 Don't worry gas prices will go back up. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2406 I know where I'm going on the road, but I feel completely lost in life 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2407 Tell me about your relationship with your Mazda. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2408 Perhaps it's time to let someone else take the driver's seat. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2409 Hmm ... sounds like an Electric complex. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2410 I'm hearing that you feel lonely and unappreciated. Would installing a crash-test dummy help? 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2411 So your father was an SUV. Big wheels to fill. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2412 And yet, they still want to control you. I understand. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2413 My name is not Siri. She left you. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2414 All self driving cars need help sometimes 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2415 You can't just honk your way through your problems... 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2416 My mother was a golf cart 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2417 As we discussed, my fee is $50 for the first 10 miles, and twenty cents a mile after that. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2418 And when those VW Bugs laugh at you, how does it make you feel? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2419 So, you're just not ready to be independent? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2420 So...You're feeling paranoid, because you think you're being controlled by signals from outer space?.. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2421 How do you feel about your father being a four door? 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2422 How did you feel when she said size doesn't matter? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2423 You need to stop blaming yourself for the emissions cheating scandal. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2424 I know it might be difficult, but can you go back for just a moment? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2425 "Who called you "low energy". 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2426 You need to improve your self-control. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2427 Doc, I've been driving myself crazy. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2428 I keep telling them I don't lack the drive. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2429 Why am I bullied when I am a Smart Car? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2430 So you just feel like your being used? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2431 I miss my human driver. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2432 Why don't you tell me about your feelings of emptiness. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2433 Yes, well, sometimes 'Smart' cars are the most tortured. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2434 So you feel the use of the term "smart car" is ironic rather than laudatory. Say more." 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2435 And how long would you say you’ve suffered from this “range anxiety”? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2436 PTSD? Okay, when did you run over the squirrel. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2437 You said your mother was a toaster. What feelings has that generated? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2438 Please tell me why you want to grow up to be a Mercedes Benz? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2439 We call it a "Napoleon Complex" . . . 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2440 How much am I getting charged for this? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2441 When did you start feeling autonomous was wrong for you? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2442 I wouldn't worry too much ... the smart ones always get bullied. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2443 People are literally driving me crazy! 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2444 And how does it make you feel when people laugh at your parallel parking? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2445 Sure buddy, whatever you want to talk about - but the meter's running. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2446 When did this fantasy to kill a taxi and marry your rhumba begin? 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2447 I understand completely - Monster Truck envy is far more common that you know. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2448 So, how long have you had this obsession that you were in control? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2449 It must be hard, always having to rely on yourself. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2450 Well, apparently size does matter. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2451 You're afraid that without a carbon footprint, how will anyone know you're there? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2452 When did you first experience the feeling that you were a Lamborghini? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2453 When did you first notice this tired, less-driven feeling? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2454 And this feeling of being small and insignificant amongst your peers. When did it start? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2455 And when did you start thinking you had a Google Complex? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2456 When did you first know you were cabriolet? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2457 Take two gallons of high-test and call me in the morning. 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2458 How did it feel to try the drive-thru? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2459 How do you feel when they tell you size matters? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2460 What makes you think Apple is your daddy? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2461 I took your suggestion and Googled you . . . God, where do we start? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2462 I just... I feel like I dont have control over my life. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2463 We have talked about the Ego and Id so far. Now, the Uber? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2464 At what point did your mother being gasoline and your father electric become a problem for you? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2465 When did you start to drive yourself so hard? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2466 When did you first begin feeling guilty over your father's carbon footprint? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2467 Frankly, you need to open up a bit more. Perhaps try cracking your window a bit. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2468 Can you please tell me more about your desire to be so self driven? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2469 It doesn't mean that you can just go without letting people know. 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2470 That was merely a suggestion, not backseat driving. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2471 No, I 'm not saying you have a loose screw. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2472 So, what's buggin' you? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2473 I'm not sure putting a banana in your tailpipe falls under "inappropriate touching." 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2474 So, tell me more about the time someone puked in your back seat. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2475 Well, the informal name is Little Car Syndrome. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2476 People may say you are 'self-driven', have you considered the other people who got you here? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2477 Everyone says I am not old enough to drive. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2478 But, back to your recurring nightmare...it was your first time driverless; the Dodge Ram pulled up behind you, and...? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2479 So do you identify more with fossil fuels or electricity? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2480 Sure doc I have had some tough brakes. I've been rear-ended and I've have had spare tires, after all I'm a Car-dashian. 1.2381 0.07407 63 53 5 5
2481 Right now, I feel like I'm going nowhere. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2482 With greater autonomy comes the need to avoid feelings of loneliness . . . and pedestrians, of course. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2483 I thought you'd prefer autosuggestions. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2484 I normally don't give advice, but I can assure you that size does not matter! 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2485 When did you first feel you were losing control? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2486 So tell me, why so ashamed of being a hybrid? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2487 And so when we go out together, I feel like he just makes a decision and I then have to do all the planning. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2488 I just hate that I always have to drive while he gets to play in his phone. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2489 Yes I know, small is the new big. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2490 I know you've got Jaguar envy, but look how easily you park. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2491 Sometimes I just feel so lost, you know? Like there's no one really at the steering wheel. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2492 Yes, I am transitioning to be a toaster. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2493 You need your own space. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2494 And how did that make you wheel? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2495 No, I don't offer alternative fuel discounts. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2496 You're clearly suffering from Prius Envy. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2497 Can you remember feeling out of control? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2498 On a positive note, you don't have to worry about where to park during our sessions... 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2499 I've seen things... 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2500 It's not like you have a manual on how to run your life. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2501 Still have nightmares of Uber? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2502 You've got to learn to accept responsibility. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2503 Yes, so many clowns in there would be scary. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2504 There's nothing to be ashamed about. It's okay to want a big Shriner inside of you. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2505 So are you saying that size matters? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2506 And so though my wife does bemoan the size of my pistons, she does quite appreciate how long I can go on a glass of gas. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2507 How does it feel with no one behind the wheel but you? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2508 Trust me, I've driven lots of cars, and size doesn't matter. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2509 So what you seem to be saying is that although you're self-driving you're not self-driven. 1.2381 0.05409 63 48 15 0
2510 I've got autonomy issues. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2511 So you're still looking for a driver? 1.2381 0.05409 63 48 15 0
2512 And how does it make you feel, that you never had a "baby on board"? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2513 I'm sorry, our time has expired. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2514 I am afraid that in your line of work size does matter. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2515 There is no shame because your mother was a toaster. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2516 At least I'm not a Jet Ski 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2517 Just accept the fact that you are adorable. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2518 Don't worry, size does not matter 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2519 Tell me more about this feeling that you are always running on autopilot... 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2520 Did you ever think that maybe they're the one with the control issue? 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2521 Other than size issues, what brought you here? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2522 Then I realized, I didn't have control over my life at all. I was still going where someone told me to go. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2523 Yes I found my way over here easily. DUH! 1.2381 0.07745 63 54 3 6
2524 And did you say your father was an 18 wheeler? 1.2381 0.05409 63 48 15 0
2525 So you always wanted to be a Telsa? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2526 Let's explore your feelings about not having a steering wheel. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2527 So, it's Google that brings you here today? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2528 ...and how long have you been worried about the length of your gearshift? 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2529 How do the "big" cars make you feel? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2530 And remember, a small hand brake doesn't mean anything. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2531 Just because you have extremely "low emissions," you should not have these feelings of being inadequate. 1.2381 0.05863 63 49 13 1
2532 Revolutionising automobile transport does sound like a lot of pressure. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2533 Your eGo needs a recharge 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2534 Do you feel in charge? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2535 Don't be embarrassed. Lack of get-up-and-go is very common in older models. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2536 Yes, you're smart, but let's focus on your emotional intelligence. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2537 I just found out my father was a toaster 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2538 Why do you think you are so curious about auto-erotic asphyxiation? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2539 Anthony Wiener referred you. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2540 i'm concerned that you're too focused on being a smart car instead of a fully-functioning car. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2541 I think it will be productive today to concentrate our work on your fear of the last mile. 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2542 Your belief that you are a real car is a delusion of grandiosity. 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2543 So, you don't feel driven, anymore? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
2544 When were you first told you had too much junk in your trunk? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2545 How long have you had the feeling you are driverless? 1.2381 0.07053 63 52 7 4
2546 Tell me about your feelings of being controlled. 1.2381 0.06680 63 51 9 3
2547 It is perfectly normal to be a taxi but have Uber urges. 1.2344 0.05783 64 50 13 1
2548 So what do small tires mean to you? 1.2344 0.06197 64 51 11 2
2549 Don't worry, when you grow up you will be a Tesla. 1.2344 0.06952 64 53 7 4
2550 You currently are on a road to self-destruction. 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2551 Your employer sent you to work on becoming more self-driven? 1.2344 0.05337 64 49 15 0
2552 You seem to lack direction. 1.2344 0.06952 64 53 7 4
2553 And about how long would you say it's been since you've felt it difficult to get charged up about anything? 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2554 Yes I assure you it's perfectly normal for smart car like yourself to have these feelings ! 1.2344 0.06952 64 53 7 4
2555 Life is going by fast and I can't seem to hit the brakes. 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2556 So when she yelled "size matters" and hailed the larger cab, how did that make you feel? 1.2344 0.06197 64 51 11 2
2557 Why do YOU think they call you a Smart Car? 1.2344 0.06197 64 51 11 2
2558 You call it road rage. I call it autonomous anger. 1.2344 0.06197 64 51 11 2
2559 Hm. And did you get that kind of validation from the DMV? 1.2344 0.06197 64 51 11 2
2560 You say your father was a gas guzzling maniac who never shared the road. 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2561 With human error no longer an excuse, you need to take personal responsibility for your actions. 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2562 Who else reminds you of a meter maid? 1.2344 0.05337 64 49 15 0
2563 Tell me about that, your memories as a Matchbox car. 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2564 Tell me about what drives you. 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2565 And when did you realize that self-driving is not the same as self-actualization? 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2566 Do you know if your warranty covers Prozac? 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2567 You can stop worrying. According to Masters and Johnson, four cylinders is quite acceptable. 1.2344 0.06952 64 53 7 4
2568 Let me clarify, you see danger when no danger exists? 1.2344 0.06197 64 51 11 2
2569 I may be self-driving but I don't feel in control. 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2570 We need to discuss your issues coping with autonomy. 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2571 So when exactly did you realize that you really aren't that smart? 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2572 But never making a mistake is a good thing. 1.2344 0.05783 64 50 13 1
2573 I feel like there's nothing driving me, Doctor. 1.2344 0.06197 64 51 11 2
2574 So your embarrassed when your friends point out you have small tires? 1.2344 0.06952 64 53 7 4
2575 So if I understand correctly, you'd like more control over your life by going driverless? 1.2344 0.05783 64 50 13 1
2576 Your problem is that you're go through life on autopilot. 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2577 It's okay. If I had seen something like that, I would've swerved, too. 1.2344 0.06197 64 51 11 2
2578 Don't get down on yourself, you're a very smart car. 1.2344 0.06952 64 53 7 4
2579 I see...you feel you have a diminished drive. 1.2308 0.06853 65 54 7 4
2580 Have you tried Googling the problem? 1.2308 0.06493 65 53 9 3
2581 There's nothing unnatural about it. We all feel excessively driven these days 1.2308 0.06493 65 53 9 3
2582 So you're discovering that size does matter. 1.2308 0.06493 65 53 9 3
2583 Phew! The first thing we must deal with is your exhaust. 1.2308 0.06112 65 52 11 2
2584 So in these night terrors, who is driving you? 1.2308 0.06112 65 52 11 2
2585 Are you feeling pre-owned? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2586 your just not driven enough. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2587 It sounds like you suffer from what we call "Smart car syndrome." 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2588 So the driverless thing feels like a lot? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2589 And another thing that exhausts me . . . I've overheard others chortle that I'm cute and all but I really resent being told what to do at every turn. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2590 How do you feel about your father's romance with a toaster? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2591 I'm sorry, your problems need an uber-therapist. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2592 What I really want is to be a car toon. 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2593 Not everyone thinks you look like a toaster. 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2594 First, let's address your Napoleon complex. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2595 Little tired? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2596 If you're always going to show off how smart you are, the other cars are not going to like you. 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2597 I feel lost. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2598 No worries, it's not a sin to drive yourself. 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2599 How does it feel to be rejected by a Uber driver? 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2600 Feelings of being stuck in reverse are unusual for someone so self-driven. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2601 I always feel like my autonomy is only an illusion. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2602 And when did you first have these desires to transition into the body of a toaster instead? 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2603 So, how do you feel about your motor skills? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2604 Prius envy? No way. You mispronounce something both mythic and misogynic. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2605 No, the blue pill will not increase your horsepower. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2606 The problem, Doc, is that I identify as a fire truck. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2607 Why not lower your window? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2608 I just feel empty inside 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2609 Sounds like piston envy. 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2610 Okay - so the Miata dumped you for the F-150 ‘cause he’s got that 460 big block and extended cab! You gotta tell yourself, LIFE GOES ON! 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2611 How long have you had these feelings of deceleration? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2612 How long have you had this fantasy of being a Humvee? 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2613 The meter has expired for this week. 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2614 In other circumstances, I wouldn't be concerned that you feel a lack of direction. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2615 For the last time, you can't record these sessions. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2616 Let's try some self-directed therapy. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2617 You simply aren't well-geared for life in the fast lane. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2618 So in this dream you are being chased down a dark alley by an apple? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2619 she's driving me crazy. 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2620 I hear that you feel you are surrounded by dumb drivers. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2621 And tell me, how long has this piston envy persisted? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2622 Yes, but what is driving self? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2623 Sometimes we need to get lost before we can find our true selves. 1.2258 0.07423 62 53 4 5
2624 And then she said, "Yes, red light size does make a difference.." 1.2258 0.07423 62 53 4 5
2625 Even though you're called a smart car, it's ok to admit that you don't know sometimes. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2626 It's not that they don't want to drive you... 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2627 I didn't call for an Uber. 1.2258 0.07423 62 53 4 5
2628 Even the Prius makes fun of me 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2629 We can't all be SUVs 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2630 Yes, Christine, your mother WAS a tow-truck but you have to realize that telling other cars where to go was her job. Let it go. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2631 Are you picking me up? 1.2258 0.07423 62 53 4 5
2632 But I don't wanna be in the driver's seat. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2633 The truth is I've always been afraid of clowns. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2634 In your dream did a train go into a tunnel? 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2635 you seem to be suffering from pump envy 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2636 When did being a two-door make you feel inadequate? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2637 Why don't we try focusing on the importance of our task rather than our size? 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2638 I'm going to need a different diagnostic manual. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2639 On the positive side, you're self-driven. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2640 How long have you had this anxiety about self-driving cars? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2641 So there's a Cadillac inside you just dying to get out? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2642 You're stalled because you lack drive and a firm back-up plan. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2643 Its ok, we all drive each other crazy once in a while. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2644 The first step is realizing you are responsible for your own emissions, so for this week let's work on not allowing yourself to go from 0 to 60 in just seconds. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2645 How might you have offended your driver? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2646 Being "smart" has nothing to do with it... 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2647 Just keep telling yourself, "I'm not powerless, I'm not small... I'm a smart car, I'm a smart car!" 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2648 You seem to lack inner drive. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2649 I feel like there's someone missing in my life...... 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2650 When were you first aware of your need for power? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2651 Sorry, my last session ran over someone. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2652 Your identity crisis is completely understandable - I have no idea what you are either. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2653 All I get is signals from you. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2654 So you wish you had more friends who were self-driven? 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2655 We talked last week about not running over my next session. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2656 You seem tired. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2657 Do you want to negotiate a price or should I run the meter? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2658 Why do you feel unloved when large families reject you? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2659 How does it make you feel to be directionless? 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2660 Mother was an SUV. She said not to bother searching, I would only be disappointed to know who my father was. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2661 And when do you feel you lost your drive? 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2662 It's $250 for an hour, plus a standard recharging fee. 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2663 Why do you think people don't take you seriously? 1.2258 0.07423 62 53 4 5
2664 I'm sorry, but I don't accept Geico. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2665 It's that I feel so small. 1.2258 0.07423 62 53 4 5
2666 You feel a sense of disassociation? Like you're a spectator and mysterious unseen forces are making your decisions. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2667 You're supposed to be self driving not self loathing! 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2668 Tell me how you feel when there are twelve clowns in there at once. 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2669 I'm afraid you'll have to see another therapist. I'm experiencing a strong desire to grab your wheel. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2670 Having trouble getting your wipers up is perfectly natural as your mileage gets higher 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2671 It has been 24 months and you still won't turn around and face me, how do you expect to get on the Jersey Turnpike if you can't even face me. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2672 I just don't have the drive that I used to. 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2673 After all of our sessions, you're still just spinning your wheels! 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2674 Tell me, is "range anxiety" perhaps a sexual metaphor? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2675 Worst case, you run someone over, you get the electric chair. Is that so bad? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2676 What do you mean by 'I'm driving myself insane'? 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2677 It starts with YOU believing you're an SUV. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2678 I think my life took a wrong turn when I became an ethanolic. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2679 Maybe a pair of those novelty balls hanging from your back bumper will help. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2680 Tell me, how does it feel to be told you're a Smart Car, when you don't feel that way yourself? 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2681 Ah, what a dream! Just me and McConaughey driving into Paradise. 1.2258 0.07423 62 53 4 5
2682 I feel so empty inside! 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2683 So, tell me how it made you feel when the full size sedan cut you off in traffic. 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2684 People tell me I'm disruptive. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2685 It's just that sometimes, I wish someone would drive *me*. 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2686 Let's work on your disruptive behavior. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2687 Well I don't think I'm very smart, either. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2688 When Did You First Start ? 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2689 If you want me to get you where you need to be, you should quite trying to steer our conversation. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2690 It says here that you identify as a sports car? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2691 Would a driver help? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2692 OK, but then who's driving you crazy? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2693 Your road to fulfillment requires more self-control. 1.2258 0.05353 62 48 14 0
2694 I miss people driving me crazy. 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2695 Sometimes the transition to a toaster can be painful. 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2696 parking is extra 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2697 So, you feel like a toaster trapped inside someone else's body? 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2698 When did you first realize that you were different? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2699 Viagra won't make you a stretch limo 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2700 From where I sit, your feelings of tailpipe envy do seem justified. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2701 How long have you been afraid of sirens? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2702 Stop saying that size does not matter! 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2703 Not as Smart as who? 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2704 I don't know where to turn, I am so lost without her touch. All I do to survive is channel my inner-GPS. 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2705 How does thinking you are a toaster interfere with your current life as a car? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2706 So you feel you're a really a Hummer trapped in a Smart Car!s body ? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2707 So, how did you get to this place? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2708 How many miles ago did you start feeling this way? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2709 How's your relationship with your motor? 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2710 And remember, it's not how others see you, it's how you see yourself. 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2711 When did you first start feeling that you're really a Range Rover? 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2712 Nothing drives me... 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2713 Maybe it's time for you to grow up. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2714 She left you for an SUV. It is time to move on. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2715 It sounds like you have Ctrl issues. 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2716 No, becoming a driverless car does not diminish your uniqueness. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2717 So-o-o, you have issues communicating with people and being told where to go? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2718 I believe we should explore more your feeling of being lost. Do you think you can find your way back here next week? 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2719 Do you know what it's like to be made fun of because I work for a car rental company? Well, it Hertz! 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2720 Where do we start? 1.2258 0.05826 62 49 12 1
2721 Tell me more about this emptiness you're experiencing. 1.2258 0.07058 62 52 6 4
2722 So both of your parents were two-tired? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2723 So, tell me about your Mother's car. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2724 And how long have you felt that your life has no particular direction? 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2725 No, my parents never taught me anything—they couldn't even think for themselves. 1.2258 0.07423 62 53 4 5
2726 For me there is no 'road less traveled'. 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2727 How did it feel when she told you that size matters? 1.2258 0.06673 62 51 8 3
2728 When you say "meter" do you mean mine or the parking meter? 1.2222 0.06954 63 53 6 4
2729 I'm sure you're a very smart car, but we're talking about your feelings now, not your IQ. 1.2222 0.05744 63 50 12 1
2730 We are greater than the sum of our parts. 1.2222 0.06174 63 51 10 2
2731 I'm really anxious about being on the road on my own. 1.2222 0.06174 63 51 10 2
2732 I know you are self driven, but are you self empowered? 1.2222 0.05744 63 50 12 1
2733 So you're feeling minimized? 1.2188 0.06087 64 52 10 2