Contest #526


Cartoon

526


Name Value
Submission deadline -
Voting started 2016-06-20
Voting ended -
Finalists announced -
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued 2016-07-03 (estimated)
Number of captions 4885
Number of responses 238677
Number of participants 7774


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Hey! My eyes are down here. 1.7919 0.06311 173 81 47 45
1 It autocorrected to "hula". 1.7622 0.07154 143 73 31 39
2 Excuse me, Miss, my eyes are down here. 1.7619 0.06641 147 69 44 34
3 Good Samaritan? I was a GREAT Samaritan. 1.7616 0.06141 151 65 57 29
4 My eyes are down here. 1.7365 0.06938 148 77 33 38
5 Next time, wash it in cold water. 1.7153 0.06660 144 72 41 31
6 I was cleaning the kitchen, without being asked, and that's all I remember. 1.7059 0.07011 136 71 34 31
7 It was autocorrected to 'hula.' 1.6950 0.07393 141 82 20 39
8 It's only dangerous if it lasts longer than 4 hours. 1.6870 0.06775 131 66 40 25
9 If it last longer than 4 hours, I'm supposed to contact my theologian right away. 1.6846 0.06646 130 64 43 23
10 You didn't see the bonus questions at the end? 1.6667 0.07362 123 68 28 27
11 If it lasts more than 4 hours I'm supposed to call a doctor. 1.6614 0.06821 127 66 38 23
12 Excuse me. My eyes are down here! 1.6581 0.07597 117 66 25 26
13 Pleased to meet you, obviously. 1.6529 0.06915 121 63 37 21
14 Actually it's kind of embarrassing. I almost wish I hadn't cured cancer. 1.6491 0.07780 114 66 22 26
15 What I actually said before I died was " I hope St Peter gives me a big hello!" 1.6466 0.06735 116 58 41 17
16 It's not funny. I've been dunked on twice today. 1.6455 0.07596 110 61 27 22
17 I let my mother-in-law move in with us. 1.6410 0.07229 117 64 31 22
18 I taught my mother how to use a computer. 1.6355 0.07558 107 59 28 20
19 If I hold my head just right, I can pick up basic cable. 1.6321 0.07007 106 54 37 15
20 I once won The New Yorker caption contest. 1.6316 0.07399 114 64 28 22
21 Thanks, I've been working out. 1.6262 0.06839 107 54 39 14
22 Actually, I do think I'm too good for you. 1.6226 0.07275 106 57 32 17
23 Remember all those times you said I was wrong? 1.6172 0.07113 128 75 27 26
24 Still, I'd gladly give it up to have genitals again. 1.6058 0.08016 104 63 19 22
25 It's God's little joke with us atheists. 1.6038 0.07425 106 60 28 18
26 It's a little cumbersome but I get great Wi-Fi. 1.6019 0.07081 103 55 34 14
27 Ironically, it's for being so humble. 1.6000 0.07521 100 56 28 16
28 My face is down here. 1.5882 0.08047 102 63 18 21
29 It seems to happen when I'm spiritually aroused. 1.5882 0.07153 102 56 32 14
30 If it lasts more than 4 hours I am calling the doctor. 1.5876 0.07291 97 53 31 13
31 A disappointing reward for a life of abstinence. 1.5859 0.07180 99 54 32 13
32 My eyes are down here, Missy. 1.5773 0.08138 97 60 18 19
33 I'm just glad to see you. 1.5773 0.07592 97 56 26 15
34 As a matter of fact, I am holier than thou. 1.5743 0.07359 101 58 28 15
35 I won the 'Holier Than Thou' contest. 1.5684 0.07726 95 56 24 15
36 I'm the guy who always left the toilet seat down. 1.5670 0.07742 97 58 23 16
37 Well, yeah . . . as a matter of fact I am holier than thou. 1.5612 0.07116 98 55 31 12
38 I liked God on Facebook. 1.5591 0.07406 93 53 28 12
39 Yes, I am happy to see you. Why do you ask? 1.5579 0.07879 95 58 21 16
40 I won the cartoon caption contest. 1.5568 0.08058 88 53 21 14
41 they thought it would be funny because I fell down a manhole 1.5510 0.07413 98 58 26 14
42 The downside is that I didn't have much fun. 1.5495 0.07373 91 52 28 11
43 I took out the trash AND made the bed. 1.5484 0.07873 93 57 21 15
44 Sometimes I regret being the virgin Larry. 1.5455 0.08227 88 55 18 15
45 I got God tickets to "Hamilton". 1.5385 0.08460 91 60 13 18
46 I'm just happy to see you. 1.5385 0.07544 91 54 25 12
47 I used to be humble, but what's the point. 1.5376 0.07099 93 53 30 10
48 It was more expensive, but the WiFi connection is incomparable. 1.5376 0.07421 93 55 26 12
49 I never removed a mattress tag. 1.5376 0.08312 93 61 14 18
50 ...and then I donated my Prius to an orphanage. 1.5368 0.07603 95 58 23 14
51 They took into consideration that I had you for a wife. 1.5341 0.07910 88 54 21 13
52 Do you think it makes me look slimmer? 1.5326 0.06639 92 50 35 7
53 I was a public school teacher for 30 years. 1.5326 0.07324 92 54 27 11
54 Well yes, I actually am holier than thou. 1.5309 0.08256 81 50 19 12
55 It was the small things, like putting the toilet seat down every time. 1.5301 0.07731 83 49 24 10
56 It's not an attitude. I am holier than thou. 1.5294 0.07776 85 51 23 11
57 Your halo looks much smaller than it appeared in your profile picture. 1.5281 0.08004 89 56 19 14
58 I stopped Trump. 1.5275 0.08020 91 58 18 15
59 Ahem...excuse me...my eyes are down here. 1.5244 0.08363 82 52 17 13
60 I fell into a manhole while texting. It's just His sense of humor. 1.5238 0.07475 84 49 26 9
61 What makes you think I'm a virgin? 1.5233 0.08390 86 56 15 15
62 It's been four hours. I'm calling the doctor. 1.5233 0.07885 86 53 21 12
63 It's been like this for 4 hours. 1.5222 0.07778 90 56 21 13
64 It's been like this for four hours. I should find a doctor. 1.5222 0.07778 90 56 21 13
65 I always put the seat down after I used the toilet. 1.5217 0.07328 92 55 26 11
66 I could've gotten it in platinum, but I didn't want to draw attention to myself. 1.5176 0.08133 85 54 18 13
67 My dear wife, I have your Mother to thank for this. By the way, I haven't seen her here. 1.5172 0.07987 87 55 19 13
68 I taught junior high. 1.5169 0.07167 89 52 28 9
69 We were both good, I was just better. 1.5122 0.07808 82 50 22 10
70 Why, yes! I AM happy to see you ... 1.5122 0.08544 82 54 14 14
71 Sorry. Happens every time it meets a cute halo. 1.5116 0.07713 86 53 22 11
72 My therapist says I'm going through a mid-eternity crisis. 1.5116 0.07350 86 51 26 9
73 ...so then He asked if I'd like to super-size it for a dollar more. 1.5114 0.08080 88 57 17 14
74 It's a blessing and a curse, really. 1.5114 0.07227 88 52 27 9
75 Oh, come on, everybody's getting haloplasty these days. 1.5111 0.07618 90 56 22 12
76 How did you know I was in advertising? 1.5063 0.08031 79 49 20 10
77 Arousal's a funny thing up here in heaven. 1.5063 0.08231 79 50 18 11
78 You were the one who ate the apple, not me. 1.5063 0.08031 79 49 20 10
79 Sometimes a halo is just a halo. 1.5062 0.07683 81 49 23 9
80 Why, yes, I am happy to see you. Why do you ask? 1.5062 0.08074 81 51 19 11
81 Let’s just say St. Peter and I go way back. 1.5062 0.07683 81 49 23 9
82 Actually, it's pronounced 'big halo', not 'big a-hole'. 1.5060 0.08635 83 56 12 15
83 I was having a bit of a mid-afterlife crisis. 1.5059 0.07223 85 50 27 8
84 Yea, I know! The worst one I've been called is "Sir Cumference". 1.5057 0.07819 87 55 20 12
85 Hey, you had me at halo. 1.5057 0.07470 87 53 24 10
86 It’s from the ‘Holier than Thou’ collection. 1.5000 0.08211 84 55 16 13
87 I need it to get FM radio. 1.5000 0.07809 82 51 21 10
88 I saved a bus full of nuns. 1.5000 0.07535 86 53 23 10
89 If you are looking for equality, go to Hell. 1.5000 0.07809 82 51 21 10
90 I never left the seat up. 1.5000 0.08344 80 52 16 12
91 Apparently, I'm holier than thou. 1.5000 0.07669 84 52 22 10
92 I wouldn't get too excited. Sometimes a halo is just a halo. 1.4941 0.07601 85 53 22 10
93 I always put the seat down. 1.4938 0.07881 81 51 20 10
94 Wait till you see my harp. 1.4938 0.08806 81 56 10 15
95 It means I'm happy to see you! 1.4938 0.07683 81 50 22 9
96 Well,after all,we did live with your mother for 20 years. 1.4938 0.07270 81 48 26 7
97 I died in Texas. 1.4938 0.08448 81 54 14 13
98 If it lasts longer than 24 hours I'm supposed to call my doctor. 1.4937 0.08426 79 52 15 12
99 Well, I did put the seat down every single time. 1.4937 0.07617 79 48 23 8
100 I finally found a use for all those unused airline miles. 1.4935 0.08395 77 50 16 11
101 If we haven't met before, it's likely because we travel in different circles. 1.4935 0.08189 77 49 18 10
102 You bet this is incredible; I was a lawyer! 1.4935 0.08597 77 51 14 12
103 I used to think I deserved it, but now it's just ironic. 1.4881 0.07284 84 51 25 8
104 When I was good, I was really good. 1.4881 0.07667 84 53 21 10
105 Circumference matters. 1.4875 0.07954 80 51 19 10
106 THEY SAY IF IT LASTS FOR MORE THAN FOUR HOURS I SHOULD CONSULT A DOCTOR. 1.4868 0.08480 76 50 15 11
107 I had just finished washing the dishes, folding the laundry, and cleaning all three bathrooms when I got hit by lightning. 1.4819 0.07543 83 52 22 9
108 You know, in retrospect, I wish I'd been a little less good... 1.4819 0.07735 83 53 20 10
109 I can get NPR, BBC, and wi-fi. 1.4815 0.08072 81 53 17 11
110 I invented ice cream. 1.4815 0.07680 81 51 21 9
111 Apparently God has a sense of humor, I was an atheist before I landed here. 1.4810 0.08423 79 53 14 12
112 I drove a Prius and I didn't talk about it much. 1.4810 0.08029 79 51 18 10
113 Sure, but try parking it. 1.4810 0.06945 79 46 28 5
114 He said to only contact Him if it lasts more than 4 hours. 1.4805 0.08187 77 50 17 10
115 The last thing I remember is shopping at Costco. 1.4805 0.08594 77 52 13 12
116 So, what is a bad girl like you doing in a place like this? 1.4756 0.07804 82 53 19 10
117 I used my miles to upgrade 1.4756 0.07202 82 50 25 7
118 I won it from Saint Francis in a poker game. 1.4750 0.07951 80 52 18 10
119 I also have great WiFi. 1.4744 0.07236 78 47 25 6
120 It used to fit better, before the diet. 1.4744 0.07236 78 47 25 6
121 I didn't realize the unequal compensation between men and women extended this far. 1.4744 0.08307 78 52 15 11
122 I abstained from all social media. 1.4744 0.08307 78 52 15 11
123 That's right...you do the same amount of work but you get a smaller halo. 1.4737 0.08051 76 49 18 9
124 Heaven isn’t fair either. 1.4737 0.08266 76 50 16 10
125 It's a curse, really. 1.4691 0.07675 81 52 20 9
126 You know what they say about a man and the size of his halo... 1.4691 0.07471 81 51 22 8
127 I'm from Texas. 1.4684 0.07819 79 51 19 9
128 Why yes, my Father does work here. Why do you ask? 1.4684 0.07608 79 50 21 8
129 Yeah, I work out. 1.4675 0.07752 77 49 20 8
130 If it lasts over four hours, I need to call my doctor. 1.4675 0.07529 77 48 22 7
131 But enough about me... 1.4658 0.08295 73 48 16 9
132 Every Bernie voter gets one. 1.4634 0.07402 82 52 22 8
133 ...and I only ever used the left lane for passing. 1.4625 0.07536 80 51 21 8
134 You say goodbye, I say Halo. 1.4625 0.07536 80 51 21 8
135 It's not the size, it's how piously you use it. 1.4625 0.07743 80 52 19 9
136 "I find the new model gives me exceptional wi-fi reception. 1.4625 0.07743 80 52 19 9
137 The reception is unbelievable, I can even pick up Philadelphia channels. 1.4615 0.07676 78 50 20 8
138 Jealousy is a sin, Margaret. 1.4615 0.08499 78 54 12 12
139 You should have seen it before I learned humility. 1.4615 0.07890 78 51 18 9
140 Really, this only happens when you're around 1.4595 0.07499 74 46 22 6
141 I was an atheist. 1.4557 0.07811 79 52 18 9
142 I try to not let it get to my head. 1.4557 0.07384 79 50 22 7
143 Why yes, I am from Texas. 1.4545 0.07961 77 51 17 9
144 My halo is evidently excited to meet you. 1.4533 0.07894 75 49 18 8
145 If this lasts more than four hours I have to go to the E.R. 1.4533 0.07894 75 49 18 8
146 What can I say? I'm holier than thou. 1.4533 0.07894 75 49 18 8
147 I'm too good for you. 1.4521 0.08512 73 50 13 10
148 I died in a hula hoop accident. God thinks this is funny! 1.4521 0.08512 73 50 13 10
149 I work out. 1.4521 0.07813 73 47 19 7
150 The swelling's supposed to go down in a couple of days. 1.4487 0.07218 78 49 23 6
151 Now that you mention it, yes, I AM holier than thou. 1.4487 0.07218 78 49 23 6
152 As a matter a fact, I did die a virgin, why do you ask? 1.4487 0.07446 78 50 21 7
153 Believe you me, I'm no saint, but I do feel there's a lot hanging over my head. 1.4487 0.08292 78 54 13 11
154 I had enough points for an upgrade. 1.4487 0.07218 78 49 23 6
155 You have no idea how much pressure it puts on me. 1.4478 0.08314 67 44 16 7
156 The extra large comes with a heavy conscious 1.4474 0.07350 76 48 22 6
157 I'm from Texas, you know. 1.4474 0.07585 76 49 20 7
158 It's a rental. 1.4474 0.06595 76 45 28 3
159 I died at Costco. 1.4459 0.07966 74 49 17 8
160 I've lost a lot of weight since I got here. 1.4459 0.08196 74 50 15 9
161 I'm a bit concerned. It's been that way longer than four hours. 1.4459 0.07966 74 49 17 8
162 It lasted more than four hours. Do you think I should call a doctor? 1.4459 0.09054 74 54 7 13
163 That's what I get for ordering online. 1.4416 0.07732 77 51 18 8
164 I know. I had you at 'halo.' 1.4416 0.07950 77 52 16 9
165 Simple: I'm just holier than thou. 1.4416 0.08162 77 53 14 10
166 Regretfully, celibacy. 1.4400 0.07411 75 48 21 6
167 I got the ring. She got everything else. 1.4400 0.08327 75 52 13 10
168 Masters of Sainthood with a minor in compassion. 1.4400 0.07650 75 49 19 7
169 I guess I'm just Holier than Thou... 1.4400 0.07882 75 50 17 8
170 It's a hallehulahoop. 1.4400 0.08107 75 51 15 9
171 Obviously, you had more fun down there than I did. 1.4394 0.08116 66 43 17 6
172 My trouble is getting close to people. 1.4384 0.07799 73 48 18 7
173 You get it when you reach Platinum Level. 1.4384 0.07552 73 47 20 6
174 It's been over four hours, I better go call my doctor. 1.4366 0.08447 71 49 13 9
175 I'm pretty blessed...you know...up there. 1.4366 0.08682 71 50 11 10
176 Platinum Circle donor level. 1.4359 0.07653 78 52 18 8
177 How did you know I was lying? 1.4348 0.07856 69 45 18 6
178 Why yes, I am very happy to see you. How did you know? 1.4342 0.07571 76 50 19 7
179 My wife thinks I'm having an afterlife crisis. 1.4342 0.07799 76 51 17 8
180 Yeah, it's impressive. Until you have to go into a bathroom stall. 1.4342 0.07335 76 49 21 6
181 How did you know I thought you were hot? 1.4324 0.08622 74 53 10 11
182 I killed Trump. 1.4324 0.08835 74 54 8 12
183 Your profile picture had a much bigger halo 1.4324 0.07716 74 49 18 7
184 Costco. $3.99. 1.4324 0.07472 74 48 20 6
185 It's the new iHalo7. 1.4306 0.08351 72 50 13 9
186 It lasts for up to 4 hours. 1.4306 0.08114 72 49 15 8
187 No, I don't think it makes you look fat. 1.4286 0.08030 70 47 16 7
188 It was my mistake. I gave them my head diameter in millimeters. 1.4286 0.07261 77 50 21 6
189 I always remembered to put the toilet seat down. 1.4286 0.07215 70 44 22 4
190 Viagra seems to work differently here 1.4267 0.07147 75 48 22 5
191 Mid after-life crisis? 1.4267 0.08093 75 52 14 9
192 Even up here, it's Who you know. 1.4267 0.06890 75 47 24 4
193 I'm humble now, but I used to have a really big head. 1.4267 0.08093 75 52 14 9
194 It was this or my own Cherub. 1.4265 0.07928 68 45 17 6
195 Let me just say I am very blessed. 1.4247 0.08023 73 50 15 8
196 Why yes, as a matter of fact, I am from Texas. 1.4247 0.07277 73 47 21 5
197 Oh, alright. It's a training halo. 1.4247 0.07277 73 47 21 5
198 In hindsight, I wish I had more sex. 1.4247 0.08257 73 51 13 9
199 I'm afraid it wouldn't work out. I'm holier than thou. 1.4247 0.07783 73 49 17 7
200 I lost mine so God loaned me His. 1.4225 0.08431 71 50 12 9
201 I'm sure you'll fit in my circle. 1.4225 0.07681 71 47 18 6
202 Does it make me look holier than thou? 1.4203 0.07559 69 45 19 5
203 So embarrassed - but it's not you - I woke up with this... 1.4194 0.09068 62 44 10 8
204 You should see my harp. 1.4189 0.07935 74 51 15 8
205 Up here size does matter. 1.4189 0.08606 74 54 9 11
206 You're the real angel, mine's just a hula hoop 1.4189 0.08165 74 52 13 9
207 Then autocorrect changed "halo" to "hula." You can guess the rest. 1.4179 0.08278 67 46 14 7
208 I lost a lot of weight. 1.4179 0.08278 67 46 14 7
209 I lived a perfect life, and I all I got was this lousy big halo. 1.4167 0.07063 72 46 22 4
210 I'm to seek immediate divine intervention if it lasts more than four hours. . . . 1.4167 0.07597 72 48 18 6
211 It means exactly what you think it means. 1.4167 0.08333 72 51 12 9
212 I was canonized for inventing the hula hoop. 1.4167 0.07850 72 49 16 7
213 I know it looks silly, but I get great cell phone reception. 1.4154 0.07561 65 42 19 4
214 I was really, really good. 1.4143 0.08264 70 49 13 8
215 I feel much more confident since my halo enhancement surgery. 1.4143 0.08264 70 49 13 8
216 Can you tell I am happy to see you? 1.4143 0.07747 70 47 17 6
217 If it lasts more than four hours I'm going to seek immediate medical attention 1.4143 0.08010 70 48 15 7
218 If it stays like this another three hours I have to see a doctor. 1.4118 0.08698 68 49 10 9
219 It's actually doing wonders for my core. 1.4118 0.08442 68 48 12 8
220 I was endowed in Heaven as on Earth. 1.4110 0.08004 73 51 14 8
221 I was much heavier then. 1.4110 0.06989 73 47 22 4
222 I've been working out. 1.4110 0.06711 73 46 24 3
223 Yes, I did pray extra for it 1.4110 0.06989 73 47 22 4
224 I taught fourth grade for thirty years and never raised my voice. 1.4091 0.08356 66 46 13 7
225 . . . eighty pounds on The Biggest Loser, but it killed me. 1.4091 0.08631 66 47 11 8
226 Yes, I was responsible for ending Trump's campaign. 1.4091 0.09155 66 49 7 10
227 It's true, but please don't refer to me as "St Peter." 1.4091 0.08072 66 45 15 6
228 Angel of the Month is OK, I guess, but doorways are a real problem. 1.4091 0.07472 66 43 19 4
229 Oh, how I wish that rumor were true. 1.4091 0.07778 66 44 17 5
230 I've been dead a long time. 1.4085 0.07917 71 49 15 7
231 I guess I'm happy to see you. 1.4085 0.07114 71 46 21 4
232 I've seen bigger. 1.4085 0.08168 71 50 13 8
233 I've lost 400 pounds. 1.4085 0.07917 71 49 15 7
234 I slipped Jesus a fifty. 1.4085 0.08168 71 50 13 8
235 Well, I guess we know who's 'holier than thou'! 1.4062 0.08545 64 45 12 7
236 Well actually, I really am holier than thou. 1.4062 0.07624 64 42 18 4
237 I called my mother every day. 1.4062 0.07624 64 42 18 4
238 I've always been an over achiever. 1.4051 0.07541 79 55 16 8
239 I died in a Costco...in Texas. 1.4032 0.08744 62 44 11 7
240 Yeah, they're sending me back to Purgatory to work off the rest of my ego. 1.4030 0.08253 67 47 13 7
241 Sure, you had more fun, but I get to be sanctimonious for eternity. 1.4030 0.07686 67 45 17 5
242 I wasn't expecting to see you up here. 1.4030 0.07385 67 44 19 4
243 I can still hear her yelling, "It's been more than five hours. Call the doctor." 1.4030 0.08784 67 49 9 9
244 All they had left was the extra-extra large. 1.4030 0.07073 67 43 21 3
245 I never forgot anniversaries, always took the garbage out and consistently put toilet seats down. 1.4030 0.08523 67 48 11 8
246 Thanks, but God only knows why. 1.4028 0.08312 72 52 11 9
247 Actually, I got it on Amazon. 1.4028 0.07573 72 49 17 6
248 Ah, but I am holier than thou. 1.4028 0.07310 72 48 19 5
249 Do you think it gives me that 'holier-than-thou' look? 1.4028 0.07310 72 48 19 5
250 I recently lost a lot of weight. 1.4028 0.07310 72 48 19 5
251 Totally worth a joyless existence on earth. 1.4028 0.08073 72 51 13 8
252 I think it's a guilt thing... I was run over by the Popemobile. 1.4028 0.08544 72 53 9 10
253 It's called a Hula Halo. God's trying to appeal to a younger crowd. 1.4028 0.08073 72 51 13 8
254 Actually, I used my miles to get the upgrade. 1.4028 0.07310 72 48 19 5
255 Big halos are so New Testament. 1.4000 0.07985 70 49 14 7
256 Not to brag, but, let's just say "world hunger" isn't a thing anymore. 1.4000 0.08435 65 46 12 7
257 I worked in a pizzeria 1.4000 0.07985 70 49 14 7
258 Ok, ok. So I am a little excited to see you. How did you know? 1.4000 0.08435 65 46 12 7
259 I can't begin to tell how how much this new router has helped my signal strength 1.4000 0.08145 65 45 14 6
260 I've waited for a woman like you all my after life. 1.4000 0.07166 70 46 20 4
261 I'll make heaven great again! 1.4000 0.08987 65 48 8 9
262 I'm going to make Heaven great again. 1.4000 0.07722 70 48 16 6
263 I used to make pizzas 1.3973 0.08216 73 53 11 9
264 I'd like you to come and join my inner circle. 1.3971 0.08674 68 50 9 9
265 I worked for Wham-o. And you? 1.3971 0.07595 68 46 17 5
266 I really am that good. 1.3971 0.08152 68 48 13 7
267 I am backed by a particularly large angel investor. 1.3971 0.08417 68 49 11 8
268 "Would you like to touch it? 1.3971 0.08152 68 48 13 7
269 I thought they said 'Would you like a big HELLO when you get there?'. 1.3971 0.08152 68 48 13 7
270 ...probably because our Father always liked me best 1.3971 0.08674 68 50 9 9
271 Remember when you told me I'd never amount to anything? 1.3971 0.07878 68 47 15 6
272 A bit much, huh? It's for that six-month stint your mother stayed with us. 1.3971 0.07595 68 46 17 5
273 My mother picked it out for me. 1.3971 0.07878 68 47 15 6
274 I guess I'm just glad to see you. 1.3968 0.09203 63 47 7 9
275 You wouldn’t believe the hoops I had to go through to get here. 1.3968 0.08326 63 44 13 6
276 You won't believe the hoops I had to go through for this... 1.3966 0.08135 58 39 15 4
277 I was a very good tipper. 1.3944 0.07086 71 47 20 4
278 Insecure? Why do you ask? 1.3944 0.07365 71 48 18 5
279 Nice, right? Turns out mine was the deciding vote that defeated Donald Trump back in 2016. 1.3944 0.08623 71 53 8 10
280 It's been like this for over four hours. Do you think I should consult my doctor? 1.3939 0.08044 66 46 14 6
281 It's for putting the seat down. 1.3939 0.07749 66 45 16 5
282 You're right, I'm holier than thou! 1.3939 0.08604 66 48 10 8
283 When I ordered, I thought for sure Heaven was metric. 1.3939 0.07749 66 45 16 5
284 Glad you asked. I'm gay, vegan and voted for Bernie. 1.3939 0.07749 66 45 16 5
285 See, up here, when a guy is turned on by a girl, it works a little differently. 1.3939 0.08604 66 48 10 8
286 Yes as a matter of fact I am holier than thou. 1.3939 0.08329 66 47 12 7
287 I'm guessing you're from Venus? I'm from Saturn 1.3939 0.08604 66 48 10 8
288 Yes, I am from Texas! Was it the accent? 1.3934 0.08191 61 42 14 5
289 We've recently developed a plan to reduce the gender halo gap gradually over the next five centuries. 1.3913 0.07785 69 48 15 6
290 I had to jump through mine a number of times just to get in here! 1.3913 0.07785 69 48 15 6
291 I supported Bernie Sanders. 1.3913 0.08054 69 49 13 7
292 I'm sorry if I seem holier than thou, but actually I am. 1.3906 0.08515 64 46 11 7
293 Yes, it's true what they say about guys with big halos. 1.3906 0.08515 64 46 11 7
294 They never discovered my sins during audits. 1.3881 0.07353 67 45 18 4
295 Not to blow my own trumpet, but I call my Mom every Sunday. 1.3881 0.07353 67 45 18 4
296 If it lasts over four hours, I have to see St. Peter. 1.3881 0.08224 67 48 12 7
297 It's just for being a white male. 1.3881 0.07655 67 46 16 5
298 I got an upgrade based on my frequent prayer miles 1.3881 0.07945 67 47 14 6
299 I'm getting worried. It's been like that for more than four hours. 1.3881 0.07945 67 47 14 6
300 I had you at ha-lo, right? 1.3881 0.07655 67 46 16 5
301 'It's because I phoned my mother every day.' 1.3881 0.07353 67 45 18 4
302 I put the lid down. 1.3881 0.07945 67 47 14 6
303 I know it's big, you don't have to stare. 1.3881 0.08224 67 48 12 7
304 It's crazy! When they said the double reward points never expire, they were right! 1.3857 0.07958 70 50 13 7
305 Let's talk endlessly about your feelings and my inadequacies. 1.3857 0.07419 70 48 17 5
306 After all, you were just a rib. 1.3857 0.08214 70 51 11 8
307 I get a lot of likes. 1.3857 0.07419 70 48 17 5
308 Not just thou -- everybody. 1.3857 0.08703 70 53 7 10
309 I'm not taking it in until I'm sure I'll keep the weight off. 1.3846 0.07498 65 44 17 4
310 Go big or go home. 1.3846 0.07812 65 45 15 5
311 I got it during a mid-afterlife crisis. 1.3846 0.07498 65 44 17 4
312 It came with the 'holier than thou'package! 1.3846 0.08405 65 47 11 7
313 It turns out being 'holier than thou' is a real thing. 1.3846 0.07812 65 45 15 5
314 Back on Earth, I invented the Hula Hoop. 1.3846 0.07812 65 45 15 5
315 I got this for being an honest politician. Of course I never won an election. 1.3846 0.08405 65 47 11 7
316 Heavenlywear@Narcissus.com, why? 1.3846 0.08405 65 47 11 7
317 Come here ad infinitum? 1.3846 0.08405 65 47 11 7
318 Once I resisted the temptation to leave a comment. 1.3846 0.07170 65 43 19 3
319 I'm just that good. 1.3846 0.08113 65 46 13 6
320 I do indeed find you quite attractive. What tipped you off? 1.3824 0.08123 68 49 12 7
321 Yes, I am happy to see you, but the size of my halo has nothing to do with that. 1.3824 0.07848 68 48 14 6
322 Sorry, this happens when I like someone. 1.3824 0.07563 68 47 16 5
323 I listened to a woman--like, really listened--and didn't try to sleep with her. 1.3824 0.08123 68 49 12 7
324 What can I say, I died a virgin. 1.3810 0.07977 63 44 14 5
325 Let's just say I'm blessed. 1.3810 0.07977 63 44 14 5
326 Mine's in the shop, but they gave me this hula hoop as a loaner. 1.3810 0.07977 63 44 14 5
327 I call it a halo hoop. 1.3810 0.07650 63 43 16 4
328 This is why I don't like online shopping. 1.3793 0.09471 58 44 6 8
329 The funny thing is, I was a Buddhist! 1.3788 0.08011 66 47 13 6
330 Why, yes--I AM holier than thou. 1.3788 0.08011 66 47 13 6
331 If this lasts longer than 4 hours, we should call someone. 1.3788 0.07714 66 46 15 5
332 So, you're a conservative. 1.3788 0.07406 66 45 17 4
333 And a big 'Halo' to you to Miss. 1.3788 0.07714 66 46 15 5
334 I was shopping at Costco during the Rapture. 1.3788 0.08297 66 48 11 7
335 Say the word and I will jump through it. 1.3788 0.08297 66 48 11 7
336 I failed to seek medical attention after four hours. 1.3788 0.08297 66 48 11 7
337 *Sigh* Well what do you expect when you're wearing your wings like that? 1.3788 0.08297 66 48 11 7
338 You haven't upgraded to the Halo 6 Plus yet? 1.3788 0.08011 66 47 13 6
339 Actually I was thinking about Pizza. 1.3788 0.07714 66 46 15 5
340 I had to jump through a lot of hoops to get here. 1.3788 0.07406 66 45 17 4
341 Yep, I'm a virgin. 1.3788 0.08573 66 49 9 8
342 Unfortunately size no longer matters. 1.3788 0.08297 66 48 11 7
343 Does my halo make me look fat? 1.3788 0.07714 66 46 15 5
344 Even up here, the gender pay gap is real 1.3788 0.08573 66 49 9 8
345 Remember me? I was your first husband! 1.3788 0.08573 66 49 9 8
346 I gave to PBS. 1.3788 0.08011 66 47 13 6
347 It's not what you're thinking - I have a big heart. 1.3788 0.07084 66 44 19 3
348 I rescued puppies. 1.3770 0.07811 61 42 15 4
349 Hmmm. I do the same amount of work and he still gets a bigger halo. 1.3768 0.08023 69 50 12 7
350 Women are from Venus, men are from Saturn. 1.3750 0.08183 64 46 12 6
351 Its not an act. I really am holier than thou. 1.3750 0.08183 64 46 12 6
352 Not only is it huge, I made the folks down in hell pay for it! 1.3750 0.08183 64 46 12 6
353 I never lied online 1.3750 0.08183 64 46 12 6
354 My halo's not ready yet so they lent me a hula hoop. 1.3750 0.08768 64 48 8 8
355 is that a hula hoop on your head or are you just happy to see me? 1.3750 0.08183 64 46 12 6
356 I never once stepped on a crack. 1.3750 0.07217 64 43 18 3
357 Yes, it is a bit showy but the reception is to die for. 1.3750 0.08183 64 46 12 6
358 Too over the top, huh? 1.3750 0.07874 64 45 14 5
359 What about coming back to my cloud and finding out for yourself? 1.3750 0.08183 64 46 12 6
360 Oh, that?" "That's the last hoop I had to jump through to finally get in here. 1.3750 0.07874 64 45 14 5
361 I always left the toilet seat down. 1.3731 0.07317 67 46 17 4
362 Aaargh! How embarrassing. It'll be back to normal in a bit. 1.3731 0.08191 67 49 11 7
363 ... and that's when I quit taking steroids. 1.3731 0.07911 67 48 13 6
364 I have a lot of Likes. 1.3731 0.07001 67 45 19 3
365 I got it at Costco. 1.3731 0.07619 67 47 15 5
366 Don't be too impressed. He grades men on the curve. 1.3731 0.07911 67 48 13 6
367 Exactly what you think it means. 1.3731 0.08191 67 49 11 7
368 Why, yes, as a matter of fact, I AM holier than thou. 1.3731 0.08191 67 49 11 7
369 No. I’m just incredibly happy to see you. 1.3731 0.07001 67 45 19 3
370 Told you I was the better half. 1.3731 0.08191 67 49 11 7
371 Sorry, this is Judeo-Christian Biblical Heaven, so you will be doing most of the work and receiving a fraction of the credit and pay... 1.3731 0.08463 67 50 9 8
372 Equal halos!? Where do you think you are... Utopia? 1.3731 0.08463 67 50 9 8
373 It comes with unlimited text, talk and data. 1.3731 0.07619 67 47 15 5
374 It's my way of making Heaven great again. 1.3710 0.07708 62 43 15 4
375 And my golden chalice comes with unlimited refills. 1.3710 0.08676 62 46 9 7
376 They said if the condition lasts for more than 24 hours to consult my physician. 1.3710 0.07708 62 43 15 4
377 They let me upgrade in Atlanta. 1.3710 0.08043 62 44 13 5
378 Believe me, if I had met you, this would be a much smaller halo. 1.3692 0.08652 65 49 8 8
379 You can't be afraid to negotiate. 1.3692 0.07128 65 44 18 3
380 Yes, I may have exaggerated the truth a little. 1.3692 0.07458 65 45 16 4
381 I got this for inventing kale chips. 1.3692 0.07458 65 45 16 4
382 Exactly what makes you say I have a " holier than thou" attitude? 1.3692 0.07458 65 45 16 4
383 Who do I call for holiness lasting longer than 4 hours? 1.3692 0.07128 65 44 18 3
384 So.....just how naughty were you? 1.3692 0.07458 65 45 16 4
385 Nope, never even removed a mattress tag. 1.3692 0.07458 65 45 16 4
386 If you think this is bad, you should see Gandhi's. 1.3676 0.08356 68 51 9 8
387 I miss lust. 1.3676 0.08089 68 50 11 7
388 You know what they say...'big hands, big halo' 1.3676 0.08089 68 50 11 7
389 Miracle-Gro. 1.3676 0.08089 68 50 11 7
390 It only happens when I get excited 1.3676 0.07813 68 49 13 6
391 You thought it would be different here? 1.3676 0.07526 68 48 15 5
392 Gender equality hasn't come this far yet. 1.3676 0.07526 68 48 15 5
393 When I was good, I was very, very good. 1.3676 0.07229 68 47 17 4
394 Seriously, is He playing ring-toss, again? 1.3651 0.07937 63 45 13 5
395 I'm very very good. 1.3651 0.08852 63 48 7 8
396 You should see my wingspan. 1.3651 0.07607 63 44 15 4
397 I met my target weight, but I still have all this excess halo. 1.3651 0.07937 63 45 13 5
398 Right before I died, I doubled my contribution to PBS. 1.3636 0.07675 66 47 14 5
399 What patriarchy? 1.3636 0.07973 66 48 12 6
400 I'm from Texas. Its a ten gallon halo. 1.3636 0.07365 66 46 16 4
401 That's OK, your's is brighter. 1.3636 0.07675 66 47 14 5
402 I bought mine at Costco. 1.3636 0.07675 66 47 14 5
403 This is nothing. You should see God's. 1.3636 0.07042 66 45 18 3
404 Does this mean we aren't a match made in heaven? 1.3636 0.07042 66 45 18 3
405 I can't overstate the importance of starting early. A few good deeds when you are young, then through the magic of compound interest... 1.3636 0.07042 66 45 18 3
406 I'm really not that good. I think it's a hole in the ozone layer. 1.3636 0.07675 66 47 14 5
407 I'm not acting holier-than-thou. I am. 1.3636 0.08260 66 49 10 7
408 I had to overcompensate when I was alive too 1.3636 0.07973 66 48 12 6
409 Makes it Hell to walk through a doorway. 1.3636 0.07973 66 48 12 6
410 I guess I can't use heaven must be missing an angel anymore so I'll just say hi, I'm Doug. 1.3636 0.07973 66 48 12 6
411 I always used my turn signal. 1.3636 0.07973 66 48 12 6
412 They tell me I'm too good to be true. 1.3636 0.07042 66 45 18 3
413 I'm the one who never watched porn. 1.3636 0.07365 66 46 16 4
414 Honestly, it wasn’t all worth it. 1.3636 0.07042 66 45 18 3
415 I can read all I like in bed but I can't sleep a wink. 1.3636 0.07973 66 48 12 6
416 Essentially I'm holier than thou. 1.3607 0.08109 61 44 12 5
417 It feels a little mid-afterlife crisis, huh? 1.3607 0.08109 61 44 12 5
418 I'm a vegan. 1.3607 0.08757 61 46 8 7
419 I got a very high score on the entrance exam. 1.3607 0.08109 61 44 12 5
420 No, I am not compensating for anything! 1.3607 0.08757 61 46 8 7
421 I would sin for you. 1.3607 0.07404 61 42 16 3
422 I invented post-its. 1.3607 0.07404 61 42 16 3
423 It's rude to stare, you know. 1.3607 0.07404 61 42 16 3
424 Oh like you've never lied on your dating profile. 1.3607 0.08757 61 46 8 7
425 I'm told my only sin was sanctimony. 1.3594 0.07832 64 46 13 5
426 Why do you want to see my hands? 1.3594 0.08731 64 49 7 8
427 What 'holier than thou' attitude? 1.3594 0.08143 64 47 11 6
428 Tragic hula-hooping accident. You? 1.3594 0.07171 64 44 17 3
429 ...and then God said, "Why didn't I think of that?" 1.3594 0.08143 64 47 11 6
430 Well haloooooooooo! 1.3594 0.08442 64 48 9 7
431 Because God is a guy. 1.3594 0.07171 64 44 17 3
432 Howdy, Ma'am. I'm from Texas. 1.3594 0.07509 64 45 15 4
433 A mid-eternity crisis? 1.3594 0.07171 64 44 17 3
434 Yes it means exactly what you're thinking. 1.3594 0.08143 64 47 11 6
435 Um, actually, wing size is a better indicator. 1.3594 0.09010 64 50 5 9
436 As a matter of fact, I am happy to to see you. 1.3594 0.07832 64 46 13 5
437 Costco. Why, where did you get yours? 1.3594 0.07509 64 45 15 4
438 Harvard. 1.3594 0.08442 64 48 9 7
439 Did you wash your's? 1.3594 0.08143 64 47 11 6
440 They call this one 'The Mandela.' 1.3594 0.06816 64 43 19 2
441 Unbeknownst to Tom, while he was playing hard to get, his halo was giving him away. 1.3594 0.08731 64 49 7 8
442 I really am holier than thou. 1.3594 0.07509 64 45 15 4
443 You were right. I AM holier-than-thou. 1.3594 0.08731 64 49 7 8
444 Aren't you glad we waited? 1.3594 0.06816 64 43 19 2
445 For the last time, I'm not compensating for anything, Gloria. 1.3594 0.08143 64 47 11 6
446 Yes, Viagra works here. Just differently. 1.3594 0.07509 64 45 15 4
447 Now you decide that size doesn't matter? 1.3594 0.08143 64 47 11 6
448 If it lasts more than four hours I have to go to the emergency cloud 1.3582 0.07275 67 47 16 4
449 I don't know, I got to the pearly gates, said hi to Uncle Peter and here I am. 1.3582 0.08154 67 50 10 7
450 It's one of the new halogens. 1.3582 0.07275 67 47 16 4
451 Yes, it's natural. 1.3582 0.06957 67 46 18 3
452 I invented gelato. 1.3562 0.07395 73 53 14 6
453 ...But how do you know I find you attractive? 1.3548 0.07660 62 44 14 4
454 Yes it's true I have an inflated halo. 1.3548 0.07998 62 45 12 5
455 Does this halo make me look holier than thou? 1.3548 0.07660 62 44 14 4
456 I'm just as surprised as you--Goldman Sachs really does do God's work. 1.3548 0.07660 62 44 14 4
457 You had me at Halo. 1.3548 0.07660 62 44 14 4
458 Turns out He's cool with vanity 1.3548 0.08322 62 46 10 6
459 The Seraphim got a deal at Costco. 1.3548 0.07660 62 44 14 4
460 You were right. I wasn't much fun. 1.3548 0.07660 62 44 14 4
461 Sexism doesn't end. Sorry. 1.3548 0.06936 62 42 18 2
462 Turns out I AM holier than thou. 1.3548 0.08322 62 46 10 6
463 Shhh, I stole it from Ghandi! 1.3548 0.07307 62 43 16 3
464 For a buck, He supersized it. 1.3548 0.07307 62 43 16 3
465 What do you mean, 'is that a cumulonimbus cloud or are you happy to see me?' 1.3548 0.07998 62 45 12 5
466 What can I say? I'm Blessed. 1.3548 0.07660 62 44 14 4
467 I’m literally holier than thou. 1.3548 0.07998 62 45 12 5
468 You'll find that, up here, size really does matter. 1.3548 0.08322 62 46 10 6
469 I guess my biggest accomplishment was the pop up ad blocker. 1.3548 0.07660 62 44 14 4
470 You'll find size matters up here, too. 1.3548 0.07307 62 43 16 3
471 Fifty years ago women didn't even have halos. 1.3538 0.07082 65 45 17 3
472 What can I say? Father always liked me best. 1.3538 0.08036 65 48 11 6
473 After four hours I'm supposed to call my doctor. 1.3538 0.07731 65 47 13 5
474 Relax. I only borrowed this from Mother Theresa. 1.3538 0.06734 65 44 19 2
475 To be honest, I'm kind of a big deal up here. 1.3538 0.07082 65 45 17 3
476 Because I AM holier than thou. 1.3538 0.07413 65 46 15 4
477 No, no, nothing like that, I'm just real happy to see you. 1.3538 0.07413 65 46 15 4
478 Yeah, I'm from Texas. How'd you know? 1.3538 0.07413 65 46 15 4
479 Isn't it obvious that I find you very attractive? 1.3538 0.08329 65 49 9 7
480 I'm glad to see you too. 1.3538 0.08036 65 48 11 6
481 Yes, ma'am. Patron saint of Texas. 1.3538 0.07413 65 46 15 4
482 If I act holier than thou, it's because I AM holier than thou. 1.3538 0.07731 65 47 13 5
483 They ran out of halos. They gave me a hula hoop. 1.3538 0.07731 65 47 13 5
484 Well obviously it's not just my opinion... I AM 'holier than thou'! 1.3538 0.07731 65 47 13 5
485 I was hoping you wouldn't notice. 1.3538 0.08329 65 49 9 7
486 The 79% gender gap is pretty much the norm here, too. 1.3538 0.07731 65 47 13 5
487 It's been more than four hours. Should I call a doctor? 1.3538 0.07413 65 46 15 4
488 I saw Hamilton and didn't mention it to anyone. 1.3538 0.08329 65 49 9 7
489 Yes dear, I'm sorry... you're right. 1.3538 0.07731 65 47 13 5
490 Sorry, sometimes I get excited too easily 1.3519 0.08830 54 40 9 5
491 It's just good to know all those years in Catholic School , weren't for nothing ! 1.3492 0.07559 63 45 14 4
492 It gets bigger every time I see you. 1.3492 0.07212 63 44 16 3
493 I didn't know being an alter boy would make such a difference. 1.3492 0.08208 63 47 10 6
494 The doctor said it's benign. 1.3492 0.07890 63 46 12 5
495 ...which isn't to say that I'm NOT happy to see you 1.3492 0.07559 63 45 14 4
496 Remember the salary differences you discovered at work? 1.3492 0.08208 63 47 10 6
497 Yes, I'm afraid I am holier than thou. 1.3492 0.07890 63 46 12 5
498 Help! It's been like this for over 4 hours! 1.3492 0.08515 63 48 8 7
499 Yeah, but I still miss my Ferrari. 1.3492 0.08208 63 47 10 6
500 People told me I was "holier-than-thou" my whole life. I was just too modest to believe it. 1.3492 0.08208 63 47 10 6
501 Sure the reception's slightly better, but I wish I thought twice before springing for the latest upgrade. 1.3492 0.07559 63 45 14 4
502 I was the billionth entrant at the pearly gates so they supersized it for free. 1.3492 0.08208 63 47 10 6
503 Well, you always told me that size mattered. 1.3492 0.08208 63 47 10 6
504 Halooo.....where have YOU been all my afterlife? 1.3492 0.08208 63 47 10 6
505 It's like being back in high school. I have no control over it. 1.3492 0.07559 63 45 14 4
506 I got it when 'It's A Wonderful Life' grossed one billion. 1.3485 0.07631 66 48 13 5
507 I had a Groupon. 1.3485 0.07631 66 48 13 5
508 I'd say the upgraded halo package was worth it 1.3448 0.08360 58 43 10 5
509 Don't let this fool you, I am quite the bad boy. 1.3448 0.08714 58 44 8 6
510 I got it from Trump University. It's huge. 1.3448 0.09054 58 45 6 7
511 You forget all those summers spent at your mother's. 1.3443 0.08391 61 46 9 6
512 Whoever said you can't take it with you clearly wasn't the Northwest hula hoop champion three years running. 1.3443 0.07712 61 44 13 4
513 I used to change the diapers. 1.3443 0.06968 61 42 17 2
514 Would you call God? It's been longer than four hours. 1.3443 0.08059 61 45 11 5
515 I have lost weight. Thanks for noticing! 1.3438 0.07785 64 47 12 5
516 That's right, darlin'. You have died and gone to heaven...! 1.3438 0.07785 64 47 12 5
517 Yes, as a matter of fact, I am a virgin. How about you? 1.3438 0.08398 64 49 8 7
518 My good deeds just vested. 1.3438 0.06762 64 44 18 2
519 My biggest sin was vanity... go figure! 1.3438 0.06762 64 44 18 2
520 The last thing I remember is wearing a sombrero. 1.3438 0.07785 64 47 12 5
521 Thanks, but if it lasts for four millennia, I need to see a doctor. 1.3438 0.07785 64 47 12 5
522 I supported Bernie. Of course, I'm holier than thou. 1.3438 0.07785 64 47 12 5
523 Yeah, hula hoop accident. What about you? 1.3438 0.07785 64 47 12 5
524 If it were just a vanity thing, I wouldn't be here 1.3438 0.07120 64 45 16 3
525 What, you thought there would be equality in heaven? 1.3438 0.07460 64 46 14 4
526 Well in all honesty, the guys at the gate called it a loop hole! 1.3438 0.07785 64 47 12 5
527 It's all true. 1.3438 0.08398 64 49 8 7
528 No, it is the pothole I fell through and ended up here. 1.3438 0.07785 64 47 12 5
529 Every NPR contributor has one. 1.3438 0.07785 64 47 12 5
530 Yes, I’ve been working out. 1.3438 0.07120 64 45 16 3
531 Halo equality is still only a goal. 1.3438 0.07120 64 45 16 3
532 I tipped the guy at the gate. 1.3396 0.08495 53 39 10 4
533 It's a much better predictor than hand size. . . . 1.3393 0.08169 56 41 11 4
534 Do you really think we have gender inequality up here? 1.3390 0.07094 59 41 16 2
535 What do you think: unfunny, somewhat funny, or funny? 1.3390 0.07494 59 42 14 3
536 No, it's just a Hula-Hoop. 1.3390 0.08919 59 46 6 7
537 In my day I walked 128,234 little old ladies across the street, rescued 34,627 cats from trees, helped..... 1.3390 0.07094 59 41 16 2
538 Never fails , my Halo gets huge when I meet a Victoria's Secret Angel. 1.3387 0.08273 62 47 9 6
539 You heard wrong. God does play favorites 1.3387 0.07947 62 46 11 5
540 My insurance guy said the extra coverage would be good in perpetuity. 1.3387 0.07947 62 46 11 5
541 I was very good. 1.3387 0.07947 62 46 11 5
542 It's actually not a halo...it's the hole in my ozone layer. 1.3387 0.07947 62 46 11 5
543 I took the garbage out 1.3387 0.07947 62 46 11 5
544 O.K.—I am just happy to see you. 1.3387 0.07947 62 46 11 5
545 I'm His press secretary. 1.3387 0.08273 62 47 9 6
546 It was a free upgrade down at Purgatory because my cloud hadn't been cleaned yet. 1.3387 0.07607 62 45 13 4
547 We're still a whole generation behind on gender equality. 1.3387 0.07251 62 44 15 3
548 I was told I had an eternity to grow into it. 1.3387 0.06877 62 43 17 2
549 The key is negotiating on the way in. 1.3387 0.07607 62 45 13 4
550 Have you seen the size of my hands? 1.3387 0.07607 62 45 13 4
551 Good luck at ring toss, I'm off to hula hooping. 1.3387 0.07251 62 44 15 3
552 How about we get together and try to make a bullseye? 1.3387 0.07947 62 46 11 5
553 I can't help feeling holier than thou! 1.3385 0.08285 65 50 8 7
554 Now, I don't mean to come off as holier than thou... 1.3385 0.07989 65 49 10 6
555 Admit it; I had you at halo. 1.3385 0.07029 65 46 16 3
556 I drove a Prius. 1.3385 0.07363 65 47 14 4
557 I probably just attended more charity dinners than you. 1.3333 0.06788 63 44 17 2
558 It's over my head. 1.3333 0.07907 69 53 9 7
559 Is your halo always that big, or are you just happy to see me? 1.3333 0.07931 54 39 12 3
560 Yeah, they come standard when you buy a Prius. 1.3333 0.07390 60 43 14 3
561 I believe that they call it the Pinocchio halo. 1.3333 0.08768 54 41 8 5
562 C'mon, there's room for both of us under mine. 1.3333 0.06400 63 43 19 1
563 I’m confused. You’re my neighbor’s wife. I coveted you. Yet, here I am. 1.3333 0.08159 63 48 9 6
564 It's fully loaded with zero percent financing until the Second Coming. 1.3333 0.08159 63 48 9 6
565 You're waiting for the dick joke, aren't you? 1.3333 0.08455 66 52 6 8
566 Not that I'm holier than thou, but... 1.3333 0.07763 60 44 12 4
567 Let me say this just once, and then I'll shut up forever: brake is left and gas is right. 1.3333 0.07505 63 46 13 4
568 It's not the circumference that counts. 1.3333 0.07505 63 46 13 4
569 They told me it was specially made for Trump's ego, but apparently he won't be getting to use it 1.3333 0.08427 57 43 9 5
570 I think everyone's pretty surprised. 1.3333 0.07226 57 40 15 2
571 Yeah, I did a few rescues. Some pro bono work. How about you? 1.3333 0.07390 60 43 14 3
572 Well, I'm happy to see you 1.3333 0.07763 60 44 12 4
573 I only eat free-range Manna. 1.3333 0.08427 57 43 9 5
574 Actually I am hollier than thou 1.3333 0.08119 60 45 10 5
575 'I had you at 'halo'" 1.3333 0.08427 57 43 9 5
576 I wanted to do something big for our date tonight. 1.3333 0.07390 60 43 14 3
577 This is why you shouldn't just buy a halo off the rack. 1.3281 0.07062 64 46 15 3
578 I don't know what to say, I thought this was going to be a Playboy cartoon. 1.3281 0.08047 64 49 9 6
579 It grows in the presence of celestial bodies. 1.3281 0.07733 64 48 11 5
580 No, it doesn't make you look fat. 1.3279 0.07654 61 45 12 4
581 I was a Bernie Sanders supporter. 1.3279 0.07288 61 44 14 3
582 But, of course, I'm holier than thou. 1.3279 0.07654 61 45 12 4
583 Trouble is, I AM holier than thou. 1.3279 0.08003 61 46 10 5
584 You're not fooling anyone with that hula hoop. 1.3279 0.08003 61 46 10 5
585 I had a ton of points left on my card. 1.3279 0.07654 61 45 12 4
586 I know halos. I have the best halos. The halos love me. 1.3279 0.08003 61 46 10 5
587 We are equal, but I'm more equal. 1.3279 0.07654 61 45 12 4
588 I can't believe we got away with it. 1.3279 0.08659 61 48 6 7
589 It's nothing special; just a bigger hole in the ozone layer. 1.3279 0.08003 61 46 10 5
590 You may be prettier, but I'm holier than thou. 1.3279 0.07288 61 44 14 3
591 Sure, I did a couple good deeds, but let's talk about you. 1.3279 0.07288 61 44 14 3
592 I'm not wearing pants. 1.3279 0.08338 61 47 8 6
593 Some say its because I made more money than god. 1.3279 0.07654 61 45 12 4
594 I still couldn't live up to my parents' expectations and now this. 1.3279 0.08003 61 46 10 5
595 Holier than thou? Why, yes I am. 1.3279 0.08338 61 47 8 6
596 Yep, I did get it at Costco. 1.3279 0.08338 61 47 8 6
597 This size came with the wings and a bag of chips. 1.3276 0.08300 58 44 9 5
598 Apparently size matters up here too. 1.3276 0.08657 58 45 7 6
599 Something tells me this is better than meeting online. 1.3276 0.08300 58 44 9 5
600 Am I detecting a touch of halo envy? 1.3276 0.07123 58 41 15 2
601 I know, and the robe is too big too! 1.3276 0.06685 58 40 17 1
602 I died with the most toys. 1.3276 0.07536 58 42 13 3
603 Be honest, do you think it's too much? 1.3276 0.07123 58 41 15 2
604 I'm a Republican but I voted for Hillary. 1.3276 0.07927 58 43 11 4
605 My halo is large because I'm happy to see you. 1.3276 0.08300 58 44 9 5
606 I'm really, really good, if you know what I mean. 1.3276 0.07536 58 42 13 3
607 Holiness? No, they measure sales. 1.3276 0.08300 58 44 9 5
608 Me? I died saving a puppy. 1.3276 0.07927 58 43 11 4
609 I never watched Fox News. 1.3276 0.07536 58 42 13 3
610 Going through doors can be tough, but it's worth it. 1.3276 0.07927 58 43 11 4
611 Those little blue pills work in mysterious ways. 1.3273 0.08228 55 41 10 4
612 I suppose this is God's way of telling me my head is too big. 1.3231 0.07938 65 50 9 6
613 I said 'bless you' even when people were just coughing. 1.3226 0.07189 62 45 14 3
614 When it comes to halo size, I assure you, I have no problems in that area. 1.3226 0.07189 62 45 14 3
615 Mother claims that when she placed the order for a "halo" it autocorrected to "hula". 1.3226 0.08219 62 48 8 6
616 Yeah, you're a God fan? Name five of his albums. 1.3226 0.07548 62 46 12 4
617 ... so I said everything is negotiable. 1.3226 0.07189 62 45 14 3
618 I guess I am holier than thou 1.3226 0.07548 62 46 12 4
619 "Does this Halo make me look fat"? 1.3226 0.08219 62 48 8 6
620 I was having a mid-afterlife crisis.... 1.3226 0.07189 62 45 14 3
621 All those Facebook posts that I liked and shared finally paid off. 1.3226 0.07548 62 46 12 4
622 It's cumbersome, but I can hang my fine woolens on it. 1.3226 0.07548 62 46 12 4
623 I'd say you barely made it. 1.3226 0.07189 62 45 14 3
624 As I suspected. Women get haloes, men get hula hoops. 1.3226 0.07891 62 47 10 5
625 It means I'm really good, if you know what I mean. 1.3226 0.07189 62 45 14 3
626 I'm still a virgin 1.3220 0.08177 59 45 9 5
627 I could show you why I have a big halo, but then you'd have to have to go to Hell. 1.3220 0.08527 59 46 7 6
628 My guess is that I was correct about global warming. 1.3220 0.07812 59 44 11 4
629 Trust me, I can be a bad boy if that's really what you're looking for. 1.3220 0.07428 59 43 13 3
630 I paid for premium. 1.3220 0.07812 59 44 11 4
631 I guess I am holier than thou, after all. 1.3220 0.07024 59 42 15 2
632 I built mother-in-law suites for a living. 1.3220 0.07812 59 44 11 4
633 You're still gonna swipe left, aren't you? 1.3220 0.08177 59 45 9 5
634 I'm applying for patron saint of the arrogant and smug. 1.3220 0.08177 59 45 9 5
635 I used to work in a pizza parlor. 1.3220 0.08177 59 45 9 5
636 'Hot' is a tricky term here. 1.3220 0.07428 59 43 13 3
637 It's a continuation of the gender pay gap. 1.3220 0.08177 59 45 9 5
638 I'm not compensating for anything if that's what's you're thinking. 1.3220 0.08527 59 46 7 6
639 I worked at the returns counter in Costco. 1.3220 0.09187 59 48 3 8
640 Because I didn't swear, steal, cheat on my wife; but mostly because I didn't vote for Donald Trump. 1.3220 0.07428 59 43 13 3
641 Halo envy is fairly common. 1.3220 0.07428 59 43 13 3
642 It's heaven. Small hands, big halo. 1.3214 0.07256 56 40 14 2
643 I said I was sorry three lives ago. 1.3214 0.08101 56 42 10 4
644 Viagra sideffect. 1.3214 0.07256 56 40 14 2
645 No, seriously. I'm a bad boy. 1.3214 0.06297 56 38 18 0
646 I'm assigned to Texas. 1.3214 0.07690 56 41 12 3
647 It's the same one God uses. 1.3214 0.08493 56 43 8 5
648 I opted for the wider radius option. It covers a multitude of sins. 1.3214 0.08493 56 43 8 5
649 Yes yes, I invented the hula hoop. 1.3214 0.08493 56 43 8 5
650 It appears that I had a lot more fun getting here than you did. 1.3167 0.07699 60 45 11 4
651 "My halo is in the shop and they didn't have any replacements, so they gave me a hula hoop instead". 1.3167 0.07323 60 44 13 3
652 I guess it means I'm holier than thou. 1.3167 0.07699 60 45 11 4
653 It's not exactly what I meant when I said 'extra large.' 1.3167 0.08401 60 47 7 6
654 I was meeker than most. Ironically, now I'm considered a show-off. 1.3167 0.08058 60 46 9 5
655 It's real--go ahead and pull on it. 1.3167 0.06506 60 42 17 1
656 They sized it for some guy named Trump, and reconsidered. 1.3167 0.08401 60 47 7 6
657 I'm happy to see you. 1.3167 0.07699 60 45 11 4
658 It's a heaven thing. On Earth it would be an erection. 1.3167 0.08058 60 46 9 5
659 You were right! I really was holier than thou 1.3167 0.07323 60 44 13 3
660 Well, I finally opened the 'options' menu. 1.3167 0.07699 60 45 11 4
661 For a few extra good deeds I was able to super size it. 1.3167 0.06926 60 43 15 2
662 They say "you can't take it with you," but I did, and this is what I bought with it. 1.3158 0.07575 57 42 12 3
663 Yes...I'm THAT good. 1.3158 0.08361 57 44 8 5
664 My Father said I'd grow into it. 1.3158 0.07149 57 41 14 2
665 I'm not picturing you naked. 1.3158 0.07575 57 42 12 3
666 I shot Donald Trump. 1.3158 0.08728 57 45 6 6
667 They were all out of Men's Medium. 1.3158 0.07575 57 42 12 3
668 We need to make heaven great again! 1.3158 0.07149 57 41 14 2
669 Halo Envy 1.3158 0.07575 57 42 12 3
670 Sorry, the correct religion was United Southern Conservative Baptist Council of 1892, not United Southern Conservative Baptist Council of 1912. 1.3158 0.08728 57 45 6 6
671 Thanks, but sainthood was really my fall-back position. 1.3158 0.07575 57 42 12 3
672 I am the guy who invented The Pill 1.3158 0.07978 57 43 10 4
673 It won't get in the way, I promise! 1.3158 0.07978 57 43 10 4
674 I went to Harvard. 1.3158 0.07575 57 42 12 3
675 It matches my ego. 1.3158 0.08361 57 44 8 5
676 Nothing fits right after you lose weight. 1.3158 0.07149 57 41 14 2
677 It's true what they say about the size of your halo. 1.3158 0.07978 57 43 10 4
678 I'm from Canada. 1.3158 0.07978 57 43 10 4
679 Yes. It is true what they say... 1.3158 0.08361 57 44 8 5
680 I got an upgrade. 1.3158 0.07575 57 42 12 3
681 Underneath it all, I'm really a humble guy! 1.3158 0.07575 57 42 12 3
682 Green stamps. 1.3158 0.07575 57 42 12 3
683 Now, how'd ya know I'm from Texas? 1.3158 0.07978 57 43 10 4
684 Seriously .... I am a Super Delegate. 1.3158 0.07575 57 42 12 3
685 I really can't explain it. Seems like every time I see you it just gets bigger. 1.3158 0.07978 57 43 10 4
686 What do you mean size doesn't matter? 1.3148 0.07853 54 40 11 3
687 I always knew I was holier than thou 1.3148 0.08286 54 41 9 4
688 What do you mean I'm acting holier than thou? 1.3137 0.08627 51 39 8 4
689 Is a safe word really a necessity? 1.3115 0.07941 61 47 9 5
690 Honestly, I always took your complaint that I was holier than thou as a compliment. 1.3115 0.07590 61 46 11 4
691 Marketing. You? 1.3115 0.07590 61 46 11 4
692 I know what you're thinking....and you're right. 1.3115 0.07941 61 47 9 5
693 Flattery even works on you-know-who. 1.3115 0.07221 61 45 13 3
694 I got it for my humility. 1.3115 0.07590 61 46 11 4
695 It looked bigger on your profile. 1.3115 0.07221 61 45 13 3
696 Of course that old saying is true! The bigger the halo the bigger the . . . 1.3115 0.07590 61 46 11 4
697 Good luck with getting through the pearly gates. 1.3115 0.07941 61 47 9 5
698 Well, maybe just a bit holier-than-thou. 1.3115 0.07590 61 46 11 4
699 Loop hole. 1.3103 0.07046 58 42 14 2
700 Because Our Father likes me better. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
701 I'm no longer the last man on earth, so how about NOW? 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
702 Unfortunately it is really heavy. 1.3103 0.07046 58 42 14 2
703 Does this halo make my head look small? 1.3103 0.07463 58 43 12 3
704 Not that size matters... 1.3103 0.07463 58 43 12 3
705 I invented the "hula-hoop", St. Peter thought this would be funny! 1.3103 0.07463 58 43 12 3
706 Because I never once wrote anything in the comments section. 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
707 What can I say? Size matters. 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
708 St. Peter likes geometry teachers. 1.3103 0.08593 58 46 6 6
709 The halo gap is just a statistical illusion. 1.3103 0.08593 58 46 6 6
710 I never posted anything about Donald Trump to Facebook. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
711 I was Trump's anger management coach. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
712 I lost the weight and nothing fits anymore. 1.3103 0.07046 58 42 14 2
713 "I just downloaded the 'Holier Than Thou' app. 1.3103 0.07046 58 42 14 2
714 Oh, this? I ran a marathon and never talked about it. 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
715 Hoola Hoop accident. And you? 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
716 The mile high club is for amateurs. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
717 How'd you know I was thinking of that? 1.3103 0.07463 58 43 12 3
718 My realm or yours? 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
719 What's an angel have to do to impress you? 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
720 I wrote a scathing review of Monty Python's "Life of Brian". 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
721 It was first prize in the Holier Than Thou contest. 1.3103 0.07463 58 43 12 3
722 I suppose you could say I'm holier than thou. 1.3103 0.06603 58 41 16 1
723 Frankly, I'd rather have a penis. 1.3103 0.08593 58 46 6 6
724 Does this robe make my halo look big? 1.3103 0.08593 58 46 6 6
725 Enough about my halo, what do you think about it? 1.3103 0.07463 58 43 12 3
726 So, when all is said and done, size DOES matter 1.3103 0.08593 58 46 6 6
727 It’s the biggest, greatest, most-terrific halo heaven has ever seen—that I can tell you—because God loves me—really, everybody loves me, it’s terrific, everyone loves me, but mostly God loves me—it’s incredible… 1.3103 0.08593 58 46 6 6
728 So you must be the Virgin Gary, am I right? 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
729 You're busy for the next million weekends? 1.3103 0.07046 58 42 14 2
730 It's the Trump model. 1.3103 0.07463 58 43 12 3
731 Then she asked, "Is that your halo or are you just glad to see me?" 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
732 Yes I get that reaction a lot, but I'm more than that. 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
733 I was surprised to find a Costco up here 1.3103 0.07463 58 43 12 3
734 Wow! Didn't expect to see you here. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
735 It's not what you do, it's who you know. 1.3103 0.07463 58 43 12 3
736 There is a glass Ceiling here too, I'm afraid. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
737 If this halo lasts more than four hours, we should call a doctor. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
738 What, if anything, would lead you to think I'm exaggerating? 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
739 I'll have to have you meet my Father first. 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
740 You know what they say about large halos... 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
741 I just think He understands that making good choices is harder for men. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
742 On the positive side, it brings in overseas television. 1.3103 0.07046 58 42 14 2
743 I did some extra credit. 1.3103 0.07463 58 43 12 3
744 Of course, men have perks everywhere. 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
745 Someone's idea of a joke. . . I used to own a Big & Tall store. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
746 Oh, nothing special; I never littered. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
747 And likewise, a big hello too you. 1.3103 0.08938 58 47 4 7
748 Apparently, I brought my ego with me. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
749 I never masturbated. 1.3103 0.08234 58 45 8 5
750 I used to sell Viagra. 1.3103 0.07858 58 44 10 4
751 I may have to seek medical help if this lasts for more than 4 hours. 1.3091 0.08942 55 44 5 6
752 Hula Hoop champ, Fresno, '64. 1.3091 0.08154 55 42 9 4
753 Now I really am 'holier than thou.' 1.3091 0.07281 55 40 13 2
754 I'm off to a Kentucky derby party! 1.3091 0.07730 55 41 11 3
755 I was fitted in the 80s when my hair was bigger. 1.3091 0.08942 55 44 5 6
756 I don't date dead women. 1.3091 0.08154 55 42 9 4
757 Well, actually I died falling through an open manhole... 1.3077 0.08481 52 40 8 4
758 Forgive me for saying so, but that was one HELL of a first date. 1.3065 0.07828 62 48 9 5
759 Sorry to be holier than thou. 1.3065 0.07828 62 48 9 5
760 Hey, great wings. 1.3065 0.07828 62 48 9 5
761 Am I in heaven or are you in Hell? 1.3061 0.07263 49 35 13 1
762 I actually listened to telemarketers 1.3051 0.07354 59 44 12 3
763 I doubled my PBS contribution *many* times. 1.3051 0.07354 59 44 12 3
764 It's bigger than the Halo 5S, but it takes better pictures. 1.3051 0.08110 59 46 8 5
765 My therapist thinks I might be having a mid-death crisis. 1.3051 0.07354 59 44 12 3
766 I guess it's because I once fired Donald Trump 1.3051 0.08110 59 46 8 5
767 It doubles as a holy hula hoop. 1.3051 0.08110 59 46 8 5
768 Never hurts to ask for an upgrade... 1.3051 0.06946 59 43 14 2
769 It's about humility, but I can't go into details or it would be smaller. 1.3051 0.07742 59 45 10 4
770 I AM holier than thou. Isn't it obvious? 1.3051 0.08110 59 46 8 5
771 I voted my conscience at the Republican Convention. 1.3051 0.07354 59 44 12 3
772 And you thought earning 77 cents for every dollar on earth wasn't fair. 1.3051 0.06511 59 42 16 1
773 Yes, I am the person who invented s'mores. 1.3051 0.07742 59 45 10 4
774 Yes, I know women say size doesn't matter. 1.3051 0.07742 59 45 10 4
775 It makes my shorter wings less noticeable. 1.3051 0.07742 59 45 10 4
776 This is not the place for halo envy. 1.3051 0.07742 59 45 10 4
777 It gives meaning to holier than thou. 1.3051 0.07742 59 45 10 4
778 It's been more than four hours and I can't find a doctor. 1.3051 0.06946 59 43 14 2
779 As a matter of fact, I am the one percent. 1.3051 0.07742 59 45 10 4
780 They gave it to me for creating a cure for Donald Trump. 1.3051 0.08463 59 47 6 6
781 Just before I died I took a Viagra. 1.3051 0.07354 59 44 12 3
782 Don't be impressed. It's a hula hoop. 1.3051 0.06946 59 43 14 2
783 would you like to go somewhere and help me make this thing get smaller? 1.3051 0.07354 59 44 12 3
784 How the hell did you get in here? 1.3051 0.07742 59 45 10 4
785 So I said to Peter, 'I did save all the children in the fire, AND I went back for Spot.' Earthly-speaking, that didn't work out for me, but... 1.3051 0.07354 59 44 12 3
786 Of course this is what I meant when I said said that size matters! 1.3051 0.08463 59 47 6 6
787 I found the slim-fit uncomfortable. 1.3051 0.07742 59 45 10 4
788 Actually, nothing special. Apparently this is the size you get if you've led an incredibly boring life. 1.3051 0.07354 59 44 12 3
789 Yep, I won the hula-hoop contest last night! 1.3036 0.07171 56 41 13 2
790 Yes, in spite of my small hands. 1.3036 0.07171 56 41 13 2
791 It was really hell getting this good. 1.3036 0.08421 56 44 7 5
792 Yes, even here. 1.3036 0.08026 56 43 9 4
793 It's not the size of your halo, it's how you use it. 1.3036 0.07611 56 42 11 3
794 You know, even up here they say size matters. 1.3036 0.08026 56 43 9 4
795 It's a halo affect. 1.3036 0.08026 56 43 9 4
796 I know what your thinking ... and that's sinful. 1.3036 0.08026 56 43 9 4
797 What gender gap? 1.3036 0.08026 56 43 9 4
798 Guess this settles it. God is a man. 1.3036 0.07611 56 42 11 3
799 According to God, size actually does matter. 1.3036 0.08421 56 44 7 5
800 I believe you're confusing big halo with big hands. 1.3019 0.07893 53 40 10 3
801 Everything is bigger in heaven. 1.3019 0.08764 53 42 6 5
802 I assure you I'm not compensating for anything. 1.3016 0.07024 63 47 13 3
803 You'd think up here it wouldn't matter but.. 1.3016 0.07718 63 49 9 5
804 I found the halo on Hulu in Hilo: it's a holy hula 1.3000 0.08336 60 48 6 6
805 Ever since i went solar. 1.3000 0.06848 60 44 14 2
806 No. For your information, this doesn't mean I died a virgin. 1.3000 0.07628 60 46 10 4
807 It may look impressive, but I haven't been able to sleep a wink in eighty years. 1.3000 0.06422 60 43 16 1
808 It's not the size, it's the...no wait, it is the size. 1.3000 0.06848 60 44 14 2
809 I staid out of politics. 1.3000 0.07628 60 46 10 4
810 What matters is what you do with it. 1.3000 0.07628 60 46 10 4
811 Heart attack during a hula hoop competition. You? 1.3000 0.06848 60 44 14 2
812 Who's "holier than thou" now? 1.2982 0.08289 57 45 7 5
813 Class of '16 Halodictorian! 1.2982 0.07902 57 44 9 4
814 Actually, I have very large hands, too. 1.2982 0.07902 57 44 9 4
815 You wouldn't believe the hoops I had to jump through to get in here! 1.2982 0.07064 57 42 13 2
816 It doesn't mean that I'm no fun. 1.2982 0.06606 57 41 15 1
817 Just one of several hoops I had to jump through to get here. 1.2982 0.06606 57 41 15 1
818 Yes, you had to put with me your whole life, but I had to put up with your mother. 1.2982 0.08289 57 45 7 5
819 I always put the shopping cart in the corral. 1.2982 0.06606 57 41 15 1
820 Well, honey, you know what they say.... 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
821 Yes, it's big. But we don't have envy here in heaven. 1.2982 0.08289 57 45 7 5
822 I didn't realize they were asking for my size in cubits. 1.2982 0.07064 57 42 13 2
823 Please, let me explain the meaning of sanctimonious. 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
824 So my mother was right--I AM the real saint in our marriage. 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
825 I resigned from Trump's staff. 1.2982 0.07902 57 44 9 4
826 So you're saying size STILL matters? 1.2982 0.08289 57 45 7 5
827 What halo gap? 1.2982 0.07902 57 44 9 4
828 I don't like to brag, but yeah, I'm really good... 1.2982 0.08289 57 45 7 5
829 It's the Harvard difference, my dear. 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
830 Yah, I just saved a busload of orphans. How'd you get yours? 1.2982 0.07064 57 42 13 2
831 I've tried shrinking it, but my ego keeps getting in the way. 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
832 I had halo enlargement surgery. 1.2982 0.07902 57 44 9 4
833 I call it a 'Halo-Hoop'. Patent pending. 1.2982 0.07902 57 44 9 4
834 Yes, how did you know I'm from Texas? 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
835 No, I'm not overcompensating for anything. 1.2982 0.06606 57 41 15 1
836 I am aroused. How did you know? 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
837 Midlife crisis? That's impossible. 1.2982 0.08289 57 45 7 5
838 I guess some of us are a little more angelic than others. 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
839 I'm afraid we don't count "Victoria's Secret" as previous experience. 1.2982 0.07902 57 44 9 4
840 I always knew God would compensate me one day. I just didn't think it would be here. 1.2982 0.07902 57 44 9 4
841 I may have stretched things a little with St. Peter. 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
842 it was just diet and exercise. 1.2982 0.07902 57 44 9 4
843 Size will always matter. 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
844 I died a virgin. 1.2982 0.07064 57 42 13 2
845 Ironically I got it for not manspreading. 1.2982 0.08658 57 46 5 6
846 Yes I know, the big halo was not worth the life of celibacy 1.2982 0.07064 57 42 13 2
847 No. This time, it's because I'm happy to see you. 1.2982 0.07495 57 43 11 3
848 Enough of my holier-than-though attitude? I AM holier than thou. 1.2982 0.06606 57 41 15 1
849 Yes, well, evidently just getting here at all after 20 years in Congress is deemed worthy of special recognition. 1.2963 0.07302 54 40 12 2
850 Are you one of Charlie's? 1.2963 0.06807 54 39 14 1
851 Around here, I'm known as God's gift to women. 1.2963 0.07766 54 41 10 3
852 I suppose you prefer bad boys. 1.2963 0.06807 54 39 14 1
853 Hi I'm Brian but all my friends up here call me Lord of the Ring. 1.2963 0.07766 54 41 10 3
854 It’s not an attitude – I actually am ‘all holier than thou’. 1.2963 0.08203 54 42 8 4
855 Want to come over and see my miracle collection? 1.2963 0.07302 54 40 12 2
856 I showed Him how to put on voicemail. 1.2963 0.08203 54 42 8 4
857 Actually, it's an escape hatch. 1.2941 0.08065 51 39 9 3
858 I died in 1520 - back when a little cash could buy you a bigger halo. 1.2931 0.07382 58 44 11 3
859 Yes, I am God's gift. 1.2931 0.06961 58 43 13 2
860 I never drop a call. 1.2931 0.06961 58 43 13 2
861 Halo. How are you? 1.2931 0.07382 58 44 11 3
862 It's not the size that counts, it's how you use it. 1.2931 0.08161 58 46 7 5
863 My father is kind of a big wheel around here. 1.2931 0.06961 58 43 13 2
864 No, nothing like that. It's just a hula hoop. 1.2931 0.07382 58 44 11 3
865 Unfortunately for you, the gender gap is eternal. 1.2931 0.07781 58 45 9 4
866 I always ate all my vegetables. 1.2931 0.06029 58 41 17 0
867 It's called "male enhancement". 1.2931 0.06961 58 43 13 2
868 My shrink says overcompensation is common during an afterlife crisis. 1.2931 0.08161 58 46 7 5
869 You know what they say...the bigger your halo... 1.2931 0.06511 58 42 15 1
870 It cost a bunch extra but was totally worth it. 1.2931 0.07781 58 45 9 4
871 Oh, this old thing? Why, thank you. 1.2931 0.06961 58 43 13 2
872 I died in a freak Hoola Hoop accident. 1.2931 0.08161 58 46 7 5
873 No dunking. 1.2931 0.07382 58 44 11 3
874 I got it on line from Lane Bryant. 1.2931 0.07781 58 45 9 4
875 Don't be silly, of course I'm not holier than YOU. 1.2931 0.06961 58 43 13 2
876 Well, I wouldn't say 'than most,' but certainly 'than thou...' 1.2931 0.08161 58 46 7 5
877 Costco. 1.2931 0.07382 58 44 11 3
878 You were expecting halo equality? 1.2931 0.07382 58 44 11 3
879 I got in before steroids were banned. 1.2931 0.07382 58 44 11 3
880 HE knew I invented the Hula Hoop. 1.2909 0.07188 55 41 12 2
881 So, do you want to see my harp? 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
882 I'm scheduled for halo reduction surgery. 1.2909 0.07188 55 41 12 2
883 In my previous life, I was president of Wham-O 1.2909 0.08071 55 43 8 4
884 What do you mean "overcompensating"? 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
885 I brought my ego with me. 1.2909 0.07188 55 41 12 2
886 It was my reward. In my former life, I had small hands! 1.2909 0.06703 55 40 14 1
887 Yes, there is a gender-gap in the standard compensation for good works. 1.2909 0.08071 55 43 8 4
888 You get it at 250,000 prayer miles. 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
889 I'm the patron saint of hula hoopers. 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
890 Yes, bigger hands...keep going. 1.2909 0.08071 55 43 8 4
891 Hey, my eyes are down here. Do you think you are the first angel to stare at my halo? 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
892 Now that I live in the cloud, I thought I’d splurge and go for the iHalo 6 Plus. 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
893 Looks like the holes in the glass ceiling are no different here. 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
894 Actually, it's a curse. 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
895 I left a big tip at the Gates... 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
896 All they had left was XXL. 1.2909 0.06703 55 40 14 1
897 Nice try but I still don't think you're getting in. 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
898 There's nothing wrong with Costco 1.2909 0.08071 55 43 8 4
899 I'm not really that holy. I'm just good at levitating hula hoops. 1.2909 0.08478 55 44 6 5
900 I know there are differences, but we can work it out. 1.2909 0.07188 55 41 12 2
901 It turns out they're real sticklers about "ten items or less." 1.2909 0.08071 55 43 8 4
902 Because I'm holier-than-thou. 1.2909 0.08866 55 45 4 6
903 I try not to come across as 'holier than thou,' but this makes it difficult. 1.2909 0.07188 55 41 12 2
904 Free installation with wi-fi, $49.99/mo. for 2 years...but then... 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
905 In your picture, your wings looked bigger. 1.2909 0.06703 55 40 14 1
906 You wouldn't believe the number of candles I lit. 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
907 Why yes, I have been very, very good. 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
908 I'm not that good. I just invented the hula hoop. 1.2909 0.08478 55 44 6 5
909 I've been blessed. 1.2909 0.07642 55 42 10 3
910 It's because I was gluten free. 1.2909 0.08478 55 44 6 5
911 I saw it on "As seen on TV". Shipping was hell though. 1.2909 0.08071 55 43 8 4
912 Having a great publicist is only part of the equation 1.2885 0.07438 52 39 11 2
913 I'm pretty sure that size does matter up here... 1.2885 0.07929 52 40 9 3
914 Saint Viagra. 1.2881 0.06860 59 44 13 2
915 It was a trend in the 50's! 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
916 I took a bullet protecting the Pope. 1.2857 0.06091 56 40 16 0
917 I doubled my contribution to PBS. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
918 Why, halo there... 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
919 Just my luck! I'm incapable of having impure thoughts. 1.2857 0.08341 56 45 6 5
920 But who had more fun? 1.2857 0.06569 63 47 14 2
921 I'm sure more people would remember public television in their will if they knew about this "Halo Benefit". 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
922 Fooled me too, I thought I was going there as well. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
923 It used to be my waistband. 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
924 I'm the only one who can make Heaven great again. 1.2857 0.08341 56 45 6 5
925 I got my first promotion. 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
926 I had it made to fit my ego. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
927 Stop accusing me of taking a holier-than-thou attitude. 1.2857 0.06603 56 41 14 1
928 I can't help it. It grows every time I see you with those beautiful feathered wings. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
929 It's not mine, I fell through it 1.2857 0.06603 56 41 14 1
930 Does it make my ears look smaller 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
931 Up here it's the only thing on me that gets bigger when I see a pretty girls. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
932 Well, I did jump through quite a few hoops to achieve this. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
933 Yeah, the rest were on backorder, so I had to go with the XXXL. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
934 I'm kind of a big wheel around here. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
935 Mine's bigger than Peters. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
936 My father being an archangel had nothing to do with it. I earned this halo. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
937 Holier than Thou. No, why do you ask? 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
938 Guess who won this year's "Holier than Thou" contest? 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
939 Peter said I got in through a loophole the size of a hula hoop. 1.2857 0.08341 56 45 6 5
940 Compensating for what? 1.2857 0.08341 56 45 6 5
941 Yes. The smaller one does make you look thinner. 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
942 It's not sexism. I was just a better person. 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
943 What's the value of a great points program if you never get to turn them in? 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
944 You know what they say about an angel with a big halo? 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
945 So now I know what happens when an erection lasts longer than four hours. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
946 No, it's not natural. I had it enlarged. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
947 Believe me, if the two were connected, I wouldn't be standing here right now. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
948 It helps with my poor self-esteem. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
949 I summer on cloud ten. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
950 I never took home a single office supply. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
951 It doubles as a wormhole. 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
952 Let's just say a Certain Somebody was grateful I got some of His associatess out of the tech and home loan bubbles just in time. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
953 He liked it so he put a ring on it. 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
954 Its a hole in the ozone, not a halo. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
955 They promised more radiance, but all I get is curious looks 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
956 It's because I never signed up for Facebook. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
957 Quite right. Holier than thou. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
958 Mine is actually a hula hoop. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
959 I gave up dairy. 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
960 Hi sweet wings. I like girls who aren't complete angels. 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
961 I died in a sombrero. 1.2857 0.08341 56 45 6 5
962 No I really am a Virgin 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
963 Yeah, even in Heaven there's a Gender Gap ! 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
964 Yeah, I'll say it: holier than thou. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
965 I can't begin to tell you how many hoops I jumped through to get in here. 1.2857 0.06603 56 41 14 1
966 It turns out 'holier than thou' is a thing. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
967 Well - the frequent flier points help. 1.2857 0.06603 56 41 14 1
968 "Yes, you had to put up with me your whole life, but I had to put up with your mother." (I submitted this under my another email but it had a typo so I'm resubmitting under this email) 1.2857 0.08341 56 45 6 5
969 My head has shrunk considerably since I arrived here. 1.2857 0.06603 56 41 14 1
970 So, do you come up here often? 1.2857 0.08341 56 45 6 5
971 You know what they say about men with big halos, right? 1.2857 0.07942 56 44 8 4
972 Why did I expect things to be different up here? 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
973 Apparently size does matter. 1.2857 0.08341 56 45 6 5
974 Actually, it's more of a curse. 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
975 Well, of course it's a sin to brag, but I'm very... very...good. 1.2857 0.07522 56 43 10 3
976 Do they shrink the longer you've been here? 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
977 Holier than thou? I get that a lot. 1.2857 0.07078 56 42 12 2
978 This halo would be shrinking, if He knew what I was thinking!! 1.2830 0.08249 53 42 7 4
979 ... and that's the story of me sleeping with three other guys in Bali that summer. 1.2830 0.08678 53 43 5 5
980 Please don't think I'm compensating. 1.2830 0.07797 53 41 9 3
981 I'm afraid that we're incompatible 1.2830 0.08249 53 42 7 4
982 It's not a halo it's an exit. 1.2830 0.07317 53 40 11 2
983 It's all silicone and only one week recovery. 1.2830 0.07797 53 41 9 3
984 Mine is a portal 1.2830 0.07797 53 41 9 3
985 ...AND ... my dog was a rescue. 1.2830 0.07797 53 41 9 3
986 I was so surprised to find out that size does matter. 1.2830 0.08249 53 42 7 4
987 Yeah, I'm vegan...is it obvious? 1.2830 0.07797 53 41 9 3
988 Well, you know what they say, the bigger the halo... 1.2821 0.06554 78 61 12 5
989 Halo? No. Ozone layer. 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
990 Yea, you can see how well gender equality works here. 1.2807 0.06505 57 42 14 1
991 Why in Heaven's name would you ask about equal pay now? 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
992 I was just too good to be true! 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
993 I ordered from the secret menu. 1.2807 0.06970 57 43 12 2
994 It's called an iHalo 6 plus - some guy called Steve sold it to me 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
995 My doctor said I should keep an eye on it. 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
996 Turns out Viagra is the one thing you CAN take with you... 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
997 People say I'm a dead ringer. 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
998 It will be the same size as yours when the Viagra wears off. 1.2807 0.06505 57 42 14 1
999 When I'm bad, I'm bad, but when I'm good, I'm very, very good. 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1000 Yes, it's true, even this is a man's world. 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1001 Why, yes, thank you. I am holier than thou. 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
1002 No,no, not a halo; just a hole I dropped through. 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1003 They have a Costco. 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
1004 I was always told I'd get my reward in heaven. 1.2807 0.06970 57 43 12 2
1005 It helps me move in larger circles. 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1006 I had a Groupon for it. 1.2807 0.06505 57 42 14 1
1007 I've never heard of halo envy. 1.2807 0.06970 57 43 12 2
1008 Wait until you see my hands. 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
1009 It's not the size of the halo but the motion of the devotion, baby. 1.2807 0.08209 57 46 6 5
1010 I made it myself, in shop class. 1.2807 0.06970 57 43 12 2
1011 Even here, size still counts! 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
1012 I'm not one to brag, but I did invent the hula hoop. 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1013 What are you talking about? If anything, I'm UNDER compensating. 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1014 Yeah, seems we've been working on this Halo Equity Gap for, like, eternity 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1015 Why yes! I am from Utah. How could you tell? 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
1016 Overcompensating for what? 1.2807 0.06970 57 43 12 2
1017 It's called the halo effect. 1.2807 0.06970 57 43 12 2
1018 AngelsMingle.com 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
1019 For just a little more, I super-sized it. 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1020 Who knew it would stretch when all my sins were washed clean? 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1021 Do you know that you have a heavenly body? 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
1022 It's a loaner while mine's in the shop 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1023 Yeah, I died a virgin. How 'bout you? 1.2807 0.08209 57 46 6 5
1024 Viagra? No. Why do you ask? 1.2807 0.06970 57 43 12 2
1025 God’s got a good sense of humor. On Earth, I was the hula hoop champion. 1.2807 0.07406 57 44 10 3
1026 So there's a halo gap in heaven? 1.2807 0.06970 57 43 12 2
1027 Welcome to heaven as it is on earth. 1.2807 0.07818 57 45 8 4
1028 I was a loophole lawyer. 1.2807 0.06970 57 43 12 2
1029 I had to jump through several big hoops to get here. 1.2787 0.07064 61 47 11 3
1030 "Now if I remember correctly, you got our house, summer home, and the sailboat. I got to keep my tools and the Porsche". 1.2778 0.07199 54 41 11 2
1031 Well, I don't want to sound holier than thou... 1.2778 0.07199 54 41 11 2
1032 And when I get bored, I use it as a hula hoop. 1.2778 0.07669 54 42 9 3
1033 Honestly, I’m not one to let size go to my head. 1.2778 0.08112 54 43 7 4
1034 Sure, the upgrade was so expensive I had to take out a loan, but I literally have an eternity to pay it back. 1.2778 0.06696 54 40 13 1
1035 I do not have a holier-than-thou attitude. 1.2778 0.07199 54 41 11 2
1036 Not even God could get Hamilton tickets without cashing in a favor 1.2778 0.08112 54 43 7 4
1037 Hula hoop champion, 1964. 1.2778 0.07669 54 42 9 3
1038 The platinum package also included extra wings and an after-lifetime guarantee. 1.2778 0.07669 54 42 9 3
1039 Are you telling me size doesn’t matter here? 1.2778 0.07199 54 41 11 2
1040 I swear... it never crossed my mind. 1.2778 0.07669 54 42 9 3
1041 Yeah, maybe one day, women will have halos the same size as men. 1.2778 0.07199 54 41 11 2
1042 Believe me, I'm no angel. I just fell through a open manhole! 1.2778 0.07669 54 42 9 3
1043 It reflects my deep and fulfilling faith in female angels. 1.2778 0.07669 54 42 9 3
1044 They were all out of mediums. 1.2778 0.06696 54 40 13 1
1045 I also have really big hands. 1.2778 0.08112 54 43 7 4
1046 "Well, a big 'hello' to you too! 1.2778 0.08112 54 43 7 4
1047 I won't say Holier than who, but you get the picture. 1.2778 0.08532 54 44 5 5
1048 I've been taking halo enhancement capsules I found on the internet. 1.2778 0.07669 54 42 9 3
1049 I know. This is just my ego. 1.2778 0.07669 54 42 9 3
1050 This is not what I meant when I prayed to become well endowed. 1.2778 0.08112 54 43 7 4
1051 The size of my halo slows me down, but I do get better service. 1.2778 0.06152 54 39 15 0
1052 Does this halo make my ass look big? 1.2778 0.08112 54 43 7 4
1053 Well, size matters here too. Sorry. 1.2778 0.07669 54 42 9 3
1054 What they say is true; big halo, ..... 1.2778 0.08112 54 43 7 4
1055 " It's actually a Hula hoop malfunction". 1.2778 0.07199 54 41 11 2
1056 Yours was way larger before last night 1.2766 0.07874 47 36 9 2
1057 One of many hoops I had to jump through to get here. 1.2759 0.05920 58 42 16 0
1058 "Halo affect" trumps "halo effect". 1.2759 0.07697 58 46 8 4
1059 OK, I admit it. I'm holier than thou 1.2745 0.07960 51 40 8 3
1060 Because She likes me better than you. 1.2745 0.07960 51 40 8 3
1061 I supported Bernie. 1.2745 0.07960 51 40 8 3
1062 What do you mean I have a "holyier than thou" attitude? 1.2727 0.07979 55 44 7 4
1063 I can see you were good but not too good. 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1064 Actually, it's a hula hoop. I didn't qualify for a halo. 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1065 To be honest, I'm a little sick of being good. 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1066 No, Honestly! I really was the guy who invented the Hula Hoop! 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1067 I need more personal space. 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1068 Mine doubles as a hula-hoop. 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1069 And, a big Halo to you, sweetie! 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1070 my death was magna cum laude 1.2727 0.07979 55 44 7 4
1071 Think of it as the heavenly wage gap. 1.2727 0.07979 55 44 7 4
1072 That blue pill has strange side effects up here. 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1073 Take care, He disdains halo envy. 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1074 There just aren't that many ways to overcompensate up here. 1.2727 0.07979 55 44 7 4
1075 Well, have you ever heard the saying "On Earth as it is in Heaven"? 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1076 I don't know if I'd call myself 'holier than though,' per se... 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1077 Please forgive my, "Holier than thou attitude." 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1078 How long did it take you to graduate from your safety halo? 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1079 They ran out of halos last week so I got stuck with this hula hoop. 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1080 My goodness grows when I'm near you! 1.2727 0.06593 55 41 13 1
1081 It was only a dollar more to supersize it. 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1082 I think it was my insistence on eating only sustainable arugula. 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1083 You wanna ditch the halos and get out of here. 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1084 I can tell when you're lying. 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1085 It was cool for a while until I realized I was an atheist. 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1086 Now drop the halo envy and fetch me a beer like the good Lord intended! 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1087 I was the one who removed Mr. Trump's hairpiece at the convention! 1.2727 0.08391 55 45 5 5
1088 Yeah, well I invented the hula hoop. 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1089 Don't get excited, it doesn't mean what you think it means. 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1090 Don't get me wrong, I'm no Saint. 1.2727 0.06593 55 41 13 1
1091 I suffered from compulsive virtue disorder. 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1092 It's just a Hula-hoop. I died in the '50s. 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1093 Why yes, I do have a very large harp. 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1094 My hands are also larger than average. 1.2727 0.07979 55 44 7 4
1095 It's a side effect of the medication that I was taking for erectile dysfunction. 1.2727 0.07979 55 44 7 4
1096 I got this for completing the bonus missions. 1.2727 0.07979 55 44 7 4
1097 It's not a hula hoop, I'm just glad to see you. 1.2727 0.07979 55 44 7 4
1098 I invented the Hula Hoop. How about you? 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1099 Actually, it's a myth. 1.2727 0.07545 55 43 9 3
1100 Yeah, I'm REALLY good. 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1101 I invented the hula hoop. God's a fan. 1.2727 0.07979 55 44 7 4
1102 and I don’t like to brag, but all this you see is God given 1.2727 0.07085 55 42 11 2
1103 Yes, I've always had a big one. 1.2692 0.07325 52 40 10 2
1104 . . . Not that I think I'm holier than thou, or anything." 1.2692 0.08291 52 42 6 4
1105 Eternally speaking, size does matter. 1.2692 0.07823 52 41 8 3
1106 Don't let the huge halo fool you -- I'm really a bad boy who needs taming. 1.2692 0.07823 52 41 8 3
1107 If my halo lasts longer than four hours, will you marry me? 1.2692 0.08291 52 42 6 4
1108 This time, it's forever. 1.2692 0.07325 52 40 10 2
1109 As you can see I'm not that kind of guy. 1.2692 0.07325 52 40 10 2
1110 I use it as a hula hoop when I get bored. 1.2692 0.06791 52 39 12 1
1111 I always use the tumble-dry setting. Keeps it from shrinking. 1.2692 0.08291 52 42 6 4
1112 Next time, you drive. 1.2692 0.08291 52 42 6 4
1113 But you know what they say about angels with large Halos... 1.2692 0.07823 52 41 8 3
1114 Actually, mine’s just in the shop. This is a loaner from Wham-O. 1.2692 0.07325 52 40 10 2
1115 I donated regularly to my local classical music station 1.2692 0.08291 52 42 6 4
1116 I thought they were giving out something else so I said, "Give me the largest one." 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1117 Yeah that's right, I'm that good. 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1118 Apparently, it's proportional. 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1119 Actually, halo circumference is a much better indicator than height or hand size. 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1120 I am a little tongue tied: it's been 560 years since I asked a girl out on a date... 1.2679 0.07850 56 45 7 4
1121 This is my fat halo. 1.2679 0.06492 56 42 13 1
1122 I also have big feet. 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1123 if it lasts more than four hours, they clip my wings. 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1124 In life, I was a Mormon. 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1125 My dating App promised a match made in Heaven. 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1126 You say goodbye, but I say 'halo'. 'Halo, halo...' 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1127 I trust you've heard the expression "too big to fail." 1.2679 0.07850 56 45 7 4
1128 If I can get it down around my belly, you'll see something really cool. 1.2679 0.07850 56 45 7 4
1129 Are you going to make Heaven great again? 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1130 Sorry. We don't have equal pray for equal work. 1.2679 0.08254 56 46 5 5
1131 It only this size for four hours. 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1132 It's not the size of the halo in the man, it's the size of the man in the halo. 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1133 I am tempted, but I am holier than thou. 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1134 Halo? Is it me you're looking for? 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1135 Is that a hula hoop or are you just glad to see me? 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1136 I used to have a very big head. 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1137 It's supposed to last for up to five hours. 1.2679 0.07850 56 45 7 4
1138 I invented the Hula hoop. 1.2679 0.07850 56 45 7 4
1139 What do you mean I'm too halocentric? 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1140 It's really a hole in the ozone layer. 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1141 Apparently, there is viagra in heaven. 1.2679 0.07850 56 45 7 4
1142 Yeah, it's the Stetson of halos. 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1143 I need to talk to a shrink. 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1144 I'll bet your wondering how good I've been. 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1145 I thought Envy was a sin 1.2679 0.07850 56 45 7 4
1146 Would you like to play with my hula hoop? 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1147 It's actually an iHalo 6 Plus, it was just released last week. 1.2679 0.06492 56 42 13 1
1148 What is this 'manspreading' thou speakest of? 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1149 It's made by Wham-O. 1.2679 0.06974 56 43 11 2
1150 You know what they say, "big halo, big hands." 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1151 I invented the "Halo Extender, For Men," it usually lasts about five hours. 1.2679 0.07850 56 45 7 4
1152 Am I holier than thou? 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1153 I tell everyone I was really good, but it's actually a hula hoop. 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1154 Truthfully, really: Does size matter? 1.2679 0.07425 56 44 9 3
1155 Well ah, yes, I am holier than thou. 1.2679 0.07850 56 45 7 4
1156 Good heavens. You barely made it! 1.2653 0.06372 49 36 13 0
1157 Now do you believe I was always right? 1.2653 0.07590 49 38 9 2
1158 Yes, it's true what they say about the size of one's halo. 1.2642 0.07204 53 41 10 2
1159 God's working at closing the gap. 1.2642 0.06681 53 40 12 1
1160 Yeah, I HAVE lost a lot of weight since High School. 1.2642 0.07204 53 41 10 2
1161 Do you think it makes my butt look small? 1.2642 0.06114 53 39 14 0
1162 Naw! It's just a hole in the ozone layer. 1.2642 0.08149 53 43 6 4
1163 To paraphrase George Orwell, "All angels are created equal, but some are more equal than others." 1.2642 0.07691 53 42 8 3
1164 It's huge, it's really beautiful. Everybody says so. 1.2642 0.07691 53 42 8 3
1165 Remember calling me a 'goddamned overachiever'? 1.2642 0.08149 53 43 6 4
1166 It covers a multitude of sins. 1.2642 0.06681 53 40 12 1
1167 It's my old man's, but he let me take it out for a spin. 1.2642 0.07691 53 42 8 3
1168 I've lost a lot of weight since I've been up here. 1.2642 0.07204 53 41 10 2
1169 Err, I gave Sister Teresa a free cab ride once. 1.2642 0.07691 53 42 8 3
1170 I know it's heaven, but we could have a hell of a good time. 1.2642 0.07691 53 42 8 3
1171 I'm fine as long as it lasts for less than four hours. 1.2642 0.07204 53 41 10 2
1172 It's sad that so many exaggerate their true halo size on e-Heaven, don't you think? 1.2642 0.08149 53 43 6 4
1173 So I told Him, with the right marketing plan, we can create a huge halo effect. 1.2642 0.07691 53 42 8 3
1174 No, really. I LIKE small halos. 1.2642 0.07204 53 41 10 2
1175 I was more than good, I was National Hula hoop champion, 1957 1.2642 0.07204 53 41 10 2
1176 What can I say? The donuts up here are heavenly. 1.2642 0.07204 53 41 10 2
1177 Classic situational irony: You like bad boys. 1.2642 0.07691 53 42 8 3
1178 Who says you can't take your elite mileage bonus with you? 1.2642 0.07204 53 41 10 2
1179 You know, it's true what they say about men with big halos. 1.2642 0.08583 53 44 4 5
1180 Yeah, it means exactly what you think it does. 1.2642 0.07691 53 42 8 3
1181 Yes honey, I'm gay! 1.2642 0.07204 53 41 10 2
1182 I was always a big kiss ass 1.2642 0.06681 53 40 12 1
1183 Actually, Janice, size *does* matter. 1.2642 0.08149 53 43 6 4
1184 Really? Even up here size matters? 1.2642 0.07691 53 42 8 3
1185 Wouldn't you like to know... 1.2632 0.06867 57 44 11 2
1186 Some of us are more equal than others. 1.2632 0.07309 57 45 9 3
1187 Even "here"we do not get equal pay and benefits! 1.2632 0.06867 57 44 11 2
1188 It's part of the premium package. 1.2600 0.07456 50 39 9 2
1189 I drove a taxi and everyone prayed for me. 1.2600 0.08480 50 41 5 4
1190 Is it that obvious? 1.2600 0.06887 50 38 11 1
1191 I'll trade you my hula-hoop for your frisbee. 1.2600 0.07985 50 40 7 3
1192 In the catalog, the photo looked a lot smaller. 1.2600 0.06887 50 38 11 1
1193 The difference is I was a priest and you were a nun. 1.2600 0.07985 50 40 7 3
1194 It's not the size of the halo, it's what you do with it. 1.2593 0.06574 54 41 12 1
1195 it gets bigger round pretty angels like you 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1196 Just patented it, the Halo Hoop 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1197 So NOW you're telling me you find me attractive?! 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1198 I used to have a swelled head 1.2593 0.07086 54 42 10 2
1199 Yes, size does matter. 1.2593 0.08012 54 44 6 4
1200 Since I met you I feel like I've died and went to heaven. 1.2593 0.08437 54 45 4 5
1201 Interested in halo enlargement? 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1202 Halo be my name 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1203 I'm a member of the honors program. 1.2593 0.06574 54 41 12 1
1204 Well actually, I was hula hooping when I died. 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1205 If you really must know, the Father is my uncle and the Son is my cousin. 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1206 You always said I was holier-than-thou. 1.2593 0.07086 54 42 10 2
1207 I'm no angel. 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1208 Sometimes, for kicks, I use it as a hula hoop. 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1209 Haaaalooo there. 1.2593 0.07086 54 42 10 2
1210 I can't help it, I'm just really good. 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1211 Yes, what you're thinking is true and that's one of the reason this place is called heaven. 1.2593 0.08437 54 45 4 5
1212 Sorry, but I'm holier than thou. 1.2593 0.06574 54 41 12 1
1213 I can assure you, I am not compensating for anything. 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1214 I promise you it's not compensation for anything 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1215 By the way, it's true what they say about the size of a guy's halo. 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1216 AND big feet 1.2593 0.06574 54 41 12 1
1217 Actually, size does matter. 1.2593 0.06574 54 41 12 1
1218 I had to go through many hoops before I got this one. 1.2593 0.07086 54 42 10 2
1219 I swear I'm not a virgin 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1220 I've lost quite a bit of weight since coming here... 1.2593 0.08012 54 44 6 4
1221 'The devil's in the details." 1.2593 0.06020 54 40 14 0
1222 When I came in, gold was cheaper. 1.2593 0.06574 54 41 12 1
1223 I'm saving myself for my next life. 1.2593 0.08012 54 44 6 4
1224 Instead of selling my soul to the Devil, I shorted it. 1.2593 0.06574 54 41 12 1
1225 I died doing what I love: hula hooping 1.2593 0.07563 54 43 8 3
1226 I'm afraid it's true even in heaven. 1.2593 0.06574 54 41 12 1
1227 Obviously I am holier than thou! 1.2586 0.07605 58 47 7 4
1228 You say Hoover DAM, I say Hoover DARN. 1.2553 0.07112 47 36 10 1
1229 Who said I am overcompensating for a small harp? 1.2549 0.08328 51 42 5 4
1230 I used to Be a lasso champion 1.2549 0.07843 51 41 7 3
1231 If you wanna get the boss's attention, you gotta think big. 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1232 In my defense, no one said NOT to wash it. 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1233 I know I am not supposed to flirt here, but my halo reacts involuntarily. 1.2549 0.06163 51 38 13 0
1234 It's true what they say about big halos. 1.2549 0.07843 51 41 7 3
1235 As you can see, I have a lot on my mind right now. 1.2549 0.06770 51 39 11 1
1236 What 'holier than thou' attitude are you talking about? 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1237 Hula Hoop Champion. 1.2549 0.06770 51 39 11 1
1238 ...and what makes you think I have a big ego? 1.2549 0.08328 51 42 5 4
1239 I've got a big one 1.2549 0.07843 51 41 7 3
1240 You made it through the glass ceiling but, sorry, we have not reached halo equality yet. 1.2549 0.08328 51 42 5 4
1241 The boss says I'm easier to keep an eye on this way. 1.2549 0.08328 51 42 5 4
1242 I can't tell you how many times I've been mistaken for Him! 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1243 Thank you, ma'am. I'm from Texas. 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1244 I don’t mean to brag, but it’s true that my large halo is indicative of…. And, if your small halo means what I believe it does, this could be a match made in heaven. 1.2549 0.07843 51 41 7 3
1245 I don't know about you... but i'm holy-as-hell right now. 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1246 I got in late and all they had left on the shelf were hula hoops. 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1247 I think you got your halo and hula hoop mixed up. 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1248 Yes, I died a virgin 1.2549 0.07843 51 41 7 3
1249 Equality doesn't happen over night. 1.2549 0.06770 51 39 11 1
1250 Yeah that's right. I invented the cloud. 1.2549 0.08328 51 42 5 4
1251 Have you seen my hula hoop, I cant seem to find it anywhere. 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1252 I know, you want to see my hands. 1.2549 0.07843 51 41 7 3
1253 I atoned, but steroids have after effects. 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1254 You're really going to blame me for the halo? I died--that's all I did. I did not ask for one THIS big. Oh, come on, don't give me that look. 1.2549 0.07326 51 40 9 2
1255 Tossed pizza crusts. What did you do? 1.2545 0.07879 55 45 6 4
1256 Did it hurt? When you fell from heav...darn, that won't work anymore. 1.2545 0.06972 55 43 10 2
1257 It's not easy being holier-than-thou. 1.2545 0.06972 55 43 10 2
1258 I don't like to brag, but you know what they say about the size of a man's halo. 1.2545 0.07439 55 44 8 3
1259 Can I help it if I invested wisely in my Afterlife portfolio? 1.2545 0.07439 55 44 8 3
1260 My friends called me goody two shoes 1.2545 0.05928 55 41 14 0
1261 You know, this halo is anatomically correct. 1.2545 0.06471 55 42 12 1
1262 OK, so you left the iron on. Does it really matter now? 1.2545 0.07879 55 45 6 4
1263 Fancy meeting YOU here. 1.2545 0.07439 55 44 8 3
1264 You have no idea how I feel about you. 1.2545 0.07879 55 45 6 4
1265 I had to redeem all my miles for it, but where else was I going to go? 1.2545 0.07439 55 44 8 3
1266 It's in recognition of my having invented the hula hoop. 1.2545 0.06471 55 42 12 1
1267 I died summa cum laude. 1.2545 0.06972 55 43 10 2
1268 This was part of my early retirement package. 1.2545 0.05928 55 41 14 0
1269 ...I had tickets to Hamilton 1.2545 0.07439 55 44 8 3
1270 I guess it's my reward for a super-boring life. 1.2545 0.06972 55 43 10 2
1271 It was the only size they had left. 1.2545 0.07439 55 44 8 3
1272 They only had XL's in stock. 1.2545 0.06471 55 42 12 1
1273 I'm celibate, damn it, and you? 1.2545 0.07879 55 45 6 4
1274 We always like to welcome new comers with a big halo. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1275 Down there, I drove a VERY small car 1.2500 0.08181 52 43 5 4
1276 I see you're admiring my girth. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1277 Well, up here size does matter! 1.2500 0.07750 56 46 6 4
1278 . . . then I said, 'who is Kim Kardashian?'. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1279 Howdy,Miss......They call me Tex. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1280 All angels are holy, but some angels are holier than others. 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1281 It's in honor of my Hula Hoop championship when I was twelve. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1282 It may be Heaven but size still matters 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1283 I'm flattered, but frankly the trick has been getting through doorways 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1284 And to think I argued with you when you called me ‘holier than thou.' 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1285 Now do you believe I'm holier than thou? 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1286 Why yes, I did drive a Porsche. Why do you ask? 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1287 It was an option in my life insurance policy. 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1288 Yeah, I'm kind of a big deal. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1289 Why yes I DID invent the Hula Hoop. Why do you ask? 1.2500 0.07319 56 45 8 3
1290 It's embarrassing, but when I see the Angel of my Dreams.... 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1291 Hon, it's a little late to exchange rings now. 1.2500 0.08681 48 40 4 4
1292 Guess what? Size really does matter. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1293 It's been four hours or more 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1294 It's great that I lost the weight, but now none of my stuff fits. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1295 Actually I'm no saint. That's a manhole. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1296 I'm not as innocent as I look. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1297 I guess God just cares more about the spotted owl than the whales. 1.2500 0.08181 52 43 5 4
1298 Trust me, being too good to be true, is not all it's cracked up to be. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1299 I can tell already we are a match made in heaven 1.2500 0.08154 48 39 6 3
1300 Told you I was His favorite! 1.2500 0.08181 52 43 5 4
1301 Wow! It's really as big as you claimed in your Tinder profile! 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1302 It came with the Costco lifetime membership. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1303 Yes it's very big. Notice I keep my hands in my pockets. 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1304 But so much for me; now tell me about you. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1305 It's a macHalo. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1306 It's a rental, mine is in the shop. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1307 Well I drove a Prius. 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1308 It's called 'radial enhancement'. 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1309 Well, because it's harder for men. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1310 I was always overcompensating. 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1311 Halo? Hell no, I just fell through a hole. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1312 It's been over five hours, I'm calling God. 1.2500 0.08630 52 44 3 5
1313 Whoever said "Size doesn't matter" was lying. 1.2500 0.08181 52 43 5 4
1314 The pearly gates weren't wide enough. I had to come in through the loading dock. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1315 Mine's a hula hoop. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1316 It lasted more than four hours! 1.2500 0.08181 52 43 5 4
1317 My halo is happy to see you! 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1318 I call it my 'huge heavenly holy halo hula hoop'. Bet you can't say That three times fast. 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1319 What say you help me sin a little and bring it down in size? 1.2500 0.06063 52 39 13 0
1320 You should see my boyfriend's! 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1321 The halos were on back order, so I used my daughter's hula hoop. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1322 I get claustrophobic. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1323 It's heavier than it looks. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1324 No sweat! Getting here is the important thing. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1325 Sounds like a case of halo envy to me. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1326 Yeah, I know, weird...good lookin' guy like me dies a virgin. But it's true! 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1327 Jesus is coming, look busy! 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1328 The gates were closed when I arrived, hence the upgrade. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1329 But of course--up here!--size doesn't matter 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1330 Alas...not my halo...just a hole in the ceiling... 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1331 It's hell fitting through doorways. 1.2500 0.06063 52 39 13 0
1332 It used to belong to a guy from Texas 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1333 Yes, I'm the guy that fixed the Ozone layer, thank you very much. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1334 Careful! Halo-envy is still ENVY. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1335 If I told you, I'd go to Hell. 1.2500 0.06656 52 40 11 1
1336 It grows when you're around. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1337 They're trying to get rid of their XXXLs. 1.2500 0.07201 52 41 9 2
1338 I always hung the toilet paper flap-front. 1.2500 0.07706 52 42 7 3
1339 I cannot tell a lie. 1.2500 0.08181 52 43 5 4
1340 As you can see, size does matter. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1341 I told you the Prius was the way to go. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1342 Oh, sure. But it doesn't count for much up here. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1343 Well yes, smaller looks good on you. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1344 I'm more than just the size of my halo, you know? 1.2453 0.05967 53 40 13 0
1345 If I said how I got this, I would be sent waaaaay South in a flash. 1.2453 0.06547 53 41 11 1
1346 It's a little thing I'm working on called a Hula Halo. 1.2453 0.06547 53 41 11 1
1347 It's a punishment for boasting. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1348 I behaved badly, but I made up for it with a lot of guilt. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1349 Actually, I bought it on e-Bay... 1.2453 0.08039 53 44 5 4
1350 I do good great. 1.2453 0.06547 53 41 11 1
1351 Overcompensating is no sin. 1.2453 0.06547 53 41 11 1
1352 They pulled up my record and saw I failed the BAR exam 11 times before I quit and 'poof' there it was 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1353 I'm sorry you feel that way. You'll have to take that up with Angel Resources. 1.2453 0.06547 53 41 11 1
1354 Well, you know what they say about a big halo. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1355 A mid-life crises? You realize we are in this for eternity, right? 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1356 I used to do rodeo rope tricks. It takes pracice. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1357 It's always gets big when I meet a pretty angel 1.2453 0.08478 53 45 3 5
1358 'Size doesn't matter,' I believe were your words. 1.2453 0.08039 53 44 5 4
1359 That's not what your halo looks like on your profile pictiure 1.2453 0.08478 53 45 3 5
1360 I went with the platinum package. 1.2453 0.05967 53 40 13 0
1361 Would you believe me if I told you I'm just a better negotiator? 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1362 My name's Earl, but my friends call me Goody Goody Two-Shoes. 1.2453 0.08039 53 44 5 4
1363 No. What do they say about big halos? 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1364 I've always felt a little holier than thou. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1365 I watched every presidential debate. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1366 I'm the first to die in a Tesla 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1367 Yes, I am that guy who took down Donald Trump. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1368 Why do you think they call it 'heaven'? But if this thing lasts longer than four hours, it can be hell. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1369 I got the assault weapons ban reinstated. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1370 At parties it comes in handy as a hula hoop. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1371 No, I'm not especially good, but I did have a successful career as a pizza maker. 1.2453 0.06547 53 41 11 1
1372 Yes, I did pay a bit more for this one. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1373 Single. No girl ever seemed good enough. 1.2453 0.05967 53 40 13 0
1374 I prefer to say, 'More well-rounded than thou.' 1.2453 0.06547 53 41 11 1
1375 What makes you think I am lying? 1.2453 0.08039 53 44 5 4
1376 By the time they got to me, all they had left were Hula Hoops. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1377 I'm not looking for a perfect angel. My halo is big enough for two. 1.2453 0.06547 53 41 11 1
1378 "Bespoke" in the description should have tipped me off to European sizing. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1379 I'm a Platinum member, so the upgrade was free. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1380 Just like on Earth. Size matters. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1381 Trust me. It's not compensating for ANYthing. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1382 Enough of the holier-than-though crap, please. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1383 It's a cowboy thing 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1384 It's for my ego 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1385 ...and then I joined Weight Watchers 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1386 Its my angel of the month award--I also get to go out to lunch with the Boss! 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1387 Now who thinks size doesn't matter? 1.2453 0.08039 53 44 5 4
1388 No thanks,one woman already had me jumping through hoops 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1389 It gets in my way at the drinking fountain 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1390 Well...for some of us abstinence was more challenging. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1391 I wasn't expecting to find you here. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1392 Depends what you mean by "gifted" 1.2453 0.06547 53 41 11 1
1393 What can I say, babe? I really am holier than thou. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1394 Well, I did make a lot of money for God 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1395 It turns out I was actually holier than thou... 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1396 Why? Heaven only knows. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1397 Accidental death by hula hoop. 1.2453 0.08039 53 44 5 4
1398 Perhaps if you had received equal pay . . .? 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1399 You made it. That's what really counts. 1.2453 0.07574 53 43 7 3
1400 What's a naughty girl like you doing in a place like this? 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1401 I just am holier than thou. 1.2453 0.07079 53 42 9 2
1402 I opted for the "holier than thou" feature. 1.2449 0.08002 49 40 6 3
1403 I didn't realize I was hula hooping so close to the edge of the cliff. 1.2449 0.07452 49 39 8 2
1404 I jump through so many hoops up here that I had mine enlarged. 1.2449 0.08002 49 40 6 3
1405 Yes, it means exactly what you think it means. 1.2449 0.06858 49 38 10 1
1406 Yes, that's what it means, except here we can't use it. 1.2449 0.06858 49 38 10 1
1407 I'm from New York. 1.2449 0.06858 49 38 10 1
1408 Don't blame me for the gender gap 1.2449 0.08002 49 40 6 3
1409 After 25 millennia together - NOW you tell me you prefer the bad boy type? 1.2449 0.08002 49 40 6 3
1410 You like it? It doubles as a hula hoop. 1.2407 0.07902 54 45 5 4
1411 This I can tell you - my halo is huge. There are no problems with my halo. And by the way, my halo and I are going to make Heaven great again! 1.2407 0.06962 54 43 9 2
1412 Donald said I could have it, he's getting a bigger one ! 1.2407 0.06962 54 43 9 2
1413 St. Peter's hearing is going. I told him I wanted bigger wings, not rings. 1.2407 0.07447 54 44 7 3
1414 How'd you guess I drove a Hummer while alive? 1.2407 0.06962 54 43 9 2
1415 I was meek, poor in spirit, along with a few others. 1.2407 0.07447 54 44 7 3
1416 Yeah, I lost mine, so Kanye let me borrow his. 1.2407 0.07902 54 45 5 4
1417 I got in Early Decision 1.2407 0.06962 54 43 9 2
1418 I realize size shouldn't matter but..... 1.2407 0.06962 54 43 9 2
1419 You know what they say about men's halos ? 1.2407 0.07447 54 44 7 3
1420 Yes, I'm really THAT good! 1.2407 0.07902 54 45 5 4
1421 For what it's worth, size still matters. 1.2407 0.07447 54 44 7 3
1422 No, I'm not 'compensating for something'. 1.2407 0.06440 54 42 11 1
1423 And whats ironic is the halo is the exact size as the open manhole! 1.2407 0.06962 54 43 9 2
1424 Whaddya mean I don't have a prayer 1.2407 0.07447 54 44 7 3
1425 Oh this only happens when I meet a really pretty angel. 1.2400 0.06737 50 39 10 1
1426 I've lost a little weight. 1.2400 0.06737 50 39 10 1
1427 You obviously led a more exciting life than I did! 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1428 I have no problem in the halo department. No complaints. 1.2400 0.06737 50 39 10 1
1429 Only an angel would say that size makes no difference. 1.2400 0.06737 50 39 10 1
1430 I had a coupon to supersize my halo. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1431 , ..., and it has an SPF rating of 100! 1.2400 0.06737 50 39 10 1
1432 Yeah, it's this app I've developed, Uber-Hailo 1.2400 0.07856 50 41 6 3
1433 I got it for always voting Democrat. 1.2400 0.07856 50 41 6 3
1434 Face it honey, your family has been insufferable! 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1435 I was an over-achiever. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1436 Super-sized it with my Golden Gate Rewards card. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1437 Call me. I'm around. 1.2400 0.06101 50 38 12 0
1438 I just wish you told me you preferred the bad boy type before I wasted 25 millennia. 1.2400 0.07856 50 41 6 3
1439 Wait'll you see my hands. 1.2400 0.08834 50 43 2 5
1440 I didn't ask for it. It comes with an elite membership. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1441 Well......A big halloo to you 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1442 Even in heaven, size matters. 1.2400 0.08359 50 42 4 4
1443 Because I invented the Hula Hoop. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1444 . . . and I was a blood donor. 1.2400 0.06101 50 38 12 0
1445 I've been told I'm very good. 1.2400 0.06737 50 39 10 1
1446 I bought an XXL, thinking it would shrink. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1447 I was flattened by a steamroller. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1448 Actually, this is cloud 10. 1.2400 0.06737 50 39 10 1
1449 It turns out that steroids affect your afterlife also. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1450 If you must know,I scored St.Peter tickets to the Janis,Jimi,Elvis,John and George concert. 1.2400 0.07856 50 41 6 3
1451 Why yes – I was THAT good. 1.2400 0.06737 50 39 10 1
1452 Let's face it.....you' re no angel. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1453 When I entered the Pearly Gates, they told me all the married guys got this size. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1454 That's right, I invented the Hula Hoop. 1.2400 0.07856 50 41 6 3
1455 Its a lot of pressure. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1456 Sorry Eve, not to night. 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1457 Yeah, you're right -- I AM holier than thou. 1.2400 0.06737 50 39 10 1
1458 Why is it always about size with you guys? 1.2400 0.07318 50 40 8 2
1459 That's not what I meant by "size matters." 1.2391 0.07078 46 36 9 1
1460 White male privilege has nothing to do with it. I am just holier than you, God says so. 1.2391 0.07730 46 37 7 2
1461 It doesn't work that way, I'm afraid 1.2364 0.07769 55 46 5 4
1462 I was a Democrat. 1.2364 0.06848 55 44 9 2
1463 Okay, okay. I lied. 1.2364 0.06848 55 44 9 2
1464 Let's just say I didn't get it for good deeds. 1.2364 0.06848 55 44 9 2
1465 I totally dis-endorsed Trump. 1.2364 0.07769 55 46 5 4
1466 It's really an ejection hatch if my wife is here. 1.2364 0.06337 55 43 11 1
1467 People who say size doesn't matter haven't been to heaven. 1.2364 0.07323 55 45 7 3
1468 What do you mean "less is more"? Where the hell am I? 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1469 Well, it would hardly be heavenly if I couldn't feel superior. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1470 I'm the I.T. guy. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1471 I'm from Original Ray's Pizza. Did you order a plain, extra large ? 1.2353 0.06620 51 40 10 1
1472 Most people just don’t get my holier-than-thou attitude. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1473 It's from sucking up to the boss. You thought you were done with that, huh? 1.2353 0.08207 51 43 4 4
1474 Does halo size even matter here in Heaven? Only one way to find out... 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1475 They were out of seven and a quarter. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1476 So, uh, do you come to this cloud often? 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1477 I hope it's really me you're unterested in and not just the bling... 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1478 I took out the entire NRA leadership. At a gun show. With an assault rifle I bought there. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1479 What can I say. On Angelbook, I've got more friends. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1480 Let me saintsplain something to you. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1481 I exercise! 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1482 What makes you say I'm lying? 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1483 It's true; size really does matter, even here in Heaven. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1484 Yes, I was texting while driving but it was a bible verse... 1.2353 0.06620 51 40 10 1
1485 We have so much in common! Both headed our local Dump the Trump groups, both were murdered by Sig Sauer MCX owners, and NOW we're in the same New Yorker cartoon! 1.2353 0.08207 51 43 4 4
1486 After graduation from the elite preschool, the rest was easy. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1487 If you think my halo is big... 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1488 It's called a hula halo. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1489 Of course, it is a ring of confidence. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1490 It's the halo effect of having doubled my PBS contribution 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1491 Let's both agree that size doesn't matter here. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1492 Apparently pride is not one of the seven deadly sins. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1493 Yes, but I have a small ego. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1494 ...and a big hallo to you! 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1495 So ... do you finally accept that I'm holier than thou? 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1496 'It's not a Commandment, exactly, but it's been policy for quite a while." 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1497 My attitude comes the fact that I actually am holier than thou. 1.2353 0.08207 51 43 4 4
1498 You know what they say about big halos up here ! 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1499 I've got the biggest one in paradise. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1500 All true what you've heard about big halos. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1501 No, for halo it's true. Hands and feet are a myth. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1502 I was told there would be 70 of you 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1503 That's what He said. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1504 I started contributing to the church very early plus compounding, voila! 1.2353 0.05999 51 39 12 0
1505 What makes you think I was staring at your wings? 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1506 I thought I ordered a medium. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1507 Does size really matter? 1.2353 0.08207 51 43 4 4
1508 The gang up here just call me "Hula Hoop" 1.2353 0.08207 51 43 4 4
1509 They're calling it the Halo Hoop. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1510 I've upgraded for increased bandwidth! 1.2353 0.06620 51 40 10 1
1511 I don't mean to brag, but... 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1512 Be honest... did you swipe right after seeing the size of my halo? 1.2353 0.06620 51 40 10 1
1513 Some stretching is normal during rebirth. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1514 I've died and gone to Heaven! 1.2353 0.06620 51 40 10 1
1515 Clearly, small hands have no correlation. 1.2353 0.08207 51 43 4 4
1516 Want to have sex? I'm very, very, very, very good. 1.2353 0.06620 51 40 10 1
1517 I actually did save my customers 15% by switching them to Geico. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1518 People always said I was holier than thou. 1.2353 0.06620 51 40 10 1
1519 There's a wage gap up here too. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1520 I have an enlarged halo 1.2353 0.05999 51 39 12 0
1521 Sorry, but my halo has a mind of its own. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1522 ...I always lifted the lid. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1523 It's not a sin to overcompensate. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1524 And how much did you donate to the St. Peter 2016 PAC? 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1525 It's a hula hoop AND I'm happy to see you. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1526 How do you feel about tithing on the first date? 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1527 No Internet. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1528 It's LED, it uses less energy. 1.2353 0.05999 51 39 12 0
1529 Actually it's the manhole I fell through. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1530 I did a lot of good for a lot of bad people. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1531 Will you help make my halo smaller? 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1532 Apparently heaven ran out of halos, so they have me this sweet hula-hoop! 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1533 C'mon, we'll have fun. It doubles as a hula hoop. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1534 I ordered it from the Trump catalog. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1535 Unequal pay, unequal halos, but you get that nice sash. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1536 They said there was a typo, and I ended up with a hula. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1537 I pledged a lot to the Kickstarter campaign. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1538 Come over to my cloud and bask in the halo effect. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1539 I guess I'm a little holier than I thought. 1.2353 0.07188 51 41 8 2
1540 Your halo would bigger if you didn't offer me that apple. 1.2353 0.06620 51 40 10 1
1541 I'm a good bluffer. 1.2353 0.06620 51 40 10 1
1542 You did notice I have very LARGE HANDS. 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1543 I am NOT overcompensating! 1.2353 0.06620 51 40 10 1
1544 Want to see my hands? 1.2353 0.07715 51 42 6 3
1545 The request was for a halo. Damn autocorrect. 1.2353 0.08207 51 43 4 4
1546 Up here, Melissa, you can have 'holier than thou,' or you can have ironic distance. You can't have both. 1.2340 0.08168 47 39 5 3
1547 Sun protection is so important, especially up here. 1.2340 0.08168 47 39 5 3
1548 And it's not even a problem if it lasts for eternity. 1.2340 0.07581 47 38 7 2
1549 I was always the favorite child. 1.2340 0.06944 47 37 9 1
1550 My personal trainer is a miracle worker. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1551 I starred in movies for the Hallmark Channel. And you? 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1552 It appear you were right about one thing. I am really am holier than thou. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1553 Where have you been all my life? 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1554 I got all my values from 'The New Yorker'. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1555 Money talks. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1556 Well, actually, I’m a vegan. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1557 God gave me this for a really good joke I told him. 1.2308 0.08061 52 44 4 4
1558 As a matter of fact, I do think I'm holier than thou. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1559 I don't show this to just anybody. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1560 Can you guess what I'm thinking? 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1561 All you have to do is say "Supersize me". 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1562 They're naming some new saints, and I may toss my halo in the ring. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1563 they give the big halo to the greeter 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1564 If you think that's big, check this out. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1565 This was an unintended side effect of my weight loss. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1566 I just keep things in perspective. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1567 Actually, this is regulation width. 1.2308 0.05900 52 40 12 0
1568 I was President Trump's Press Secretary for all eight years. 1.2308 0.08061 52 44 4 4
1569 They wouldn't let me bring my Ferrari. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1570 How did I do It? Simple. Stay out of politics, away from the stock market, and eat all my vegetables. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1571 I've been told that size does matter. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1572 I wish size mattered up here, but it doesn't. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1573 If you've got it. Flaunt it 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1574 It almost feels like those little blue pills are still with me. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1575 No, nothing special. Just an ozone hole. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1576 My iHalo has more data space, and connects directly to my cloud. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1577 Patron Saint of Hula Hoop, pleased to meet you! 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1578 You should see me trying to get through doorways. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1579 It means I'm very big up here and down there. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1580 I got mine from Costco! 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1581 I can see it in your eyes...halo envy. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1582 God's having a hard time getting that Equal Halo Act through Congress. Hopefully next year. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1583 It's not how big it is, it's what you do with it. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1584 No, wings don't make your butt look big. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1585 I call it the Hula Halo 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1586 I got in through a loophole. 1.2308 0.05900 52 40 12 0
1587 I don't mean to sing my praises, but ... 1.2308 0.04280 169 141 17 11
1588 Mine vibrates. 1.2308 0.08061 52 44 4 4
1589 Actually, I'm just standing in a manhole. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1590 It's on loan from Mother Theresa for the week. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1591 It's not you, it's your halo. 1.2308 0.08061 52 44 4 4
1592 Apparently it has something to do with my intellect. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1593 Size matters. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1594 It's my reward for having been monogamous. So I guess I'll have to pass up your offer. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1595 Relax...Halo Envy is NOT a sin 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1596 He ran out, so I got the hoola hoop. 1.2308 0.08516 52 45 2 5
1597 Well, actually, I was really quite modest. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1598 Never mind what He says. Size DOES matter! 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1599 Well now we know. Size does matter. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1600 Oh, yeah, baby: I'm THAT good! 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1601 As a matter of fact, size does matter. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1602 Seriously, having a big one is truly overrated. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1603 Celibacy is a vastly overrated virtue. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1604 It turns out that tithing fifteen per cent from gross is better than fifteen net. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1605 Geez, it looked bigger on your profile. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1606 At least up here I am well endowed. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1607 Yes ma'am, I am from Texas. How can you tell? 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1608 I worked for this halo. White male privilege had nothing to do with it. 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1609 Maybe it's only the halo effect, but what's your stand on sex in heaven? 1.2308 0.08061 52 44 4 4
1610 Let's just say I was endowed by the creator more than most...... 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1611 Where's my wingman when I need him 1.2308 0.05900 52 40 12 0
1612 Have faith, my dear: As above, so below. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1613 We've waited long enough, baby. Let's lose these things. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1614 If you think that's big, wait until you see what else I've got. 1.2308 0.06508 52 41 10 1
1615 I used to have a huge afro. 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1616 ... and then I said 'Why don't you write a play about Alexander Hamilton?' 1.2308 0.07578 52 43 6 3
1617 I realized a second too late that I should have been more clear when I asked for a "big one" 1.2308 0.07063 52 42 8 2
1618 You must be new here 1.2292 0.07437 48 39 7 2
1619 Oh my god! What the halo happened? 1.2292 0.07437 48 39 7 2
1620 I'm not mansplaining - I actually am holier than thou. 1.2292 0.07437 48 39 7 2
1621 It just grows when I get excited. 1.2292 0.07437 48 39 7 2
1622 It's actually a GPS device; I'm on a one day pass from Purgatory. 1.2292 0.06815 48 38 9 1
1623 So, are you saying that will last for eternity? 1.2292 0.08011 48 40 5 3
1624 It only gets this big when I see you! 1.2292 0.07437 48 39 7 2
1625 I never told a lie. 1.2273 0.07873 44 36 6 2
1626 I said hula, not halo 1.2273 0.07170 44 35 8 1
1627 They were low on halos; it's a hula hoop. 1.2273 0.07170 44 35 8 1
1628 What I asked for once I got here was a big 'Hello!' 1.2264 0.06942 53 43 8 2
1629 Oh, I'd always heard that size didn't matter." 1.2264 0.06398 53 42 10 1
1630 Actually, I'd say it's hu-uuu-ge. 1.2264 0.06398 53 42 10 1
1631 You think I'm exaggerating? 1.2264 0.06942 53 43 8 2
1632 My team really deserves the credit; it's too bad they're in hell. 1.2264 0.06398 53 42 10 1
1633 Rub yours, it will get bigger, too. 1.2264 0.07447 53 44 6 3
1634 Yep ... it means exactly that! 1.2264 0.06398 53 42 10 1
1635 I am not compensating. 1.2264 0.06942 53 43 8 2
1636 I am NOT overcompensating for a s short wing span. 1.2264 0.06942 53 43 8 2
1637 I could be really good to you too. 1.2264 0.07447 53 44 6 3
1638 You have no idea how boring my life was. 1.2264 0.06942 53 43 8 2
1639 I died in an untimely hula hoop accident. 1.2264 0.06398 53 42 10 1
1640 Got them fooled up here too I see. 1.2264 0.07447 53 44 6 3
1641 You were right. I really am a "Holier than thou guy." 1.2264 0.06398 53 42 10 1
1642 It's a little embarrassing. 1.2264 0.07447 53 44 6 3
1643 Since I've lost all of the weight, I haven't had the chance to get it re sized. 1.2245 0.07860 49 41 5 3
1644 I don't wish to seem holier than thou, but... 1.2245 0.07860 49 41 5 3
1645 I had to cash in all my "selfless deeds", but I think it's a good look. 1.2245 0.06022 49 38 11 0
1646 See, I am holier than thou. 1.2245 0.06691 49 39 9 1
1647 Sure, now you say size doesn't matter! 1.2245 0.08384 49 42 3 4
1648 Of course I was referring to my halo when I said it was bigger than most. 1.2245 0.07299 49 40 7 2
1649 Unfortunately, it's an inverse relationship. 1.2245 0.06691 49 39 9 1
1650 Up here, it's not size that matters, but circumference. 1.2245 0.08384 49 42 3 4
1651 Yes, I invented the Hula Hoop. 1.2245 0.07299 49 40 7 2
1652 There are no problems in that department, either. 1.2245 0.06691 49 39 9 1
1653 Yeah, I used to have a swelled head. Somehow, everybody knows. 1.2245 0.07299 49 40 7 2
1654 Yes, I am giving you a holier-than-thou attitude. 1.2245 0.07299 49 40 7 2
1655 5th grade. Hula Hoop champ. 1.2245 0.06691 49 39 9 1
1656 I lived to a ripe old age, but it felt even longer. 1.2245 0.06691 49 39 9 1
1657 When I behold your beauty , I can't control myself. 1.2245 0.06691 49 39 9 1
1658 You're affecting my halo, you know. 1.2245 0.06691 49 39 9 1
1659 I know...I know... it looks ridiculous, but the only size left was Republican Front Runner. 1.2245 0.06691 49 39 9 1
1660 I usually take M but XXL was the only size He had left. 1.2245 0.07299 49 40 7 2
1661 I remember saying that I wouldn't be caught dead with a hula hoop. 1.2245 0.07860 49 41 5 3
1662 It's a Pinocchio halo. And no, the wings don't make your butt look fat. 1.2245 0.07860 49 41 5 3
1663 "Is it true what they say about men with big halos"? 1.2245 0.08384 49 42 3 4
1664 It's complicated. 1.2245 0.07860 49 41 5 3
1665 I play a lot of Halo. 1.2245 0.08384 49 42 3 4
1666 That’s just a recognition of my impressive humility. 1.2245 0.08384 49 42 3 4
1667 It's in proportion to my ego. 1.2245 0.07299 49 40 7 2
1668 It'll shrink, you'll see. 1.2245 0.07299 49 40 7 2
1669 I hope it looks as big as it does on Tinder. 1.2245 0.07860 49 41 5 3
1670 Well, I'm a Bernie supporter 1.2245 0.07860 49 41 5 3
1671 Once again, size DOES matter. 1.2245 0.07299 49 40 7 2
1672 I got the deluxe package. 1.2245 0.06691 49 39 9 1
1673 They ran short of halos, so I had to settle for a hula hoop. 1.2222 0.07320 54 45 6 3
1674 Why do you say I have a holier-than-thou complex? 1.2222 0.06293 54 43 10 1
1675 Don't give me that 'holier than thou' look again. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1676 Why? Because chastity is harder for a man. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1677 Well, yes. It does make me "holier than thou"! 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1678 All I said was, "Super-size me!" 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
1679 Does this halo make me look fat? Be honest! 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1680 '....so that's how I earned my 113th set of wings, but enough about me' 1.2200 0.05918 50 39 11 0
1681 Frankly I think they gave it to me as a punishment. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1682 Do you think it steals His thunder? 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1683 Two characters in search of a punch line, in a heaven-like environment. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1684 I never got any complaints. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1685 I was a hula hoop champion. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1686 When we were on Earth, you said size didn't matter. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1687 am I seeing heaven or is just me? 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1688 They gave me the frequent flyer upgrade. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1689 I've got accident forgiveness. 1.2200 0.08226 50 43 3 4
1690 Yep. It's all thanks to Miracle-Gro. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1691 You know I REALLY do like you. 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
1692 They say halos lasting more than 4 hours may require emergency treatment. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1693 Don't judge me by the size of my halo 1.2200 0.05918 50 39 11 0
1694 I'm sorry to disappoint--it simply means I'm holier than thou. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1695 It turns out that size DOES matter. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1696 You should see my SAT scores. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1697 Apparently, size does matter up here. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1698 Size matters here too. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1699 You'te gonna need a bigger halo. 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
1700 Not really .... I used to work in a pizzeria. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1701 Yeah, it's true what they say about men with big halos. This is heaven, isn't it? 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1702 You can't tell by looking at me, but I used to be very fat. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1703 My mother was Goody Two-Shoes and my father was Dudley Do-Right. Why do you ask? 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
1704 Yes. It's the same down there. Trust me. 1.2200 0.08226 50 43 3 4
1705 ...so Peter said 'would you like to be holy or super-holy?' so I sa... 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1706 They ran out of mediums and smalls. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1707 You probably think I'm compensating, but this halo is purely functional. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1708 Oh, yeah...and I also love puppies. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1709 Inversely proportional to number of sins, I swear. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1710 As it turns out, size does matter.... 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1711 ...ummm, I'm going to Hell, aren't I...!! 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1712 Up here, it's not the size of a man's hands that tells you anything ... 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1713 I got it soon after I realized we had no feet. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1714 Some women say it's the biggest they've ever seen. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1715 You know it's true what they say about male angels with big halos. 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
1716 I was no angel, but I was exceptionally good. 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
1717 Did u fall from heaven? Because... wait never mind. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1718 I get lounge access and 5,000 points a year for infinity. 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
1719 From having an exaggerated sense of self-importance. Where'd you get your small one? 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1720 I had a crush on you in high school. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1721 It is just the right size to double as a hula hoop. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1722 Lord knows, I am ready to downsize. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1723 I had to exploit some big loopholes to get here. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1724 Your cloud or mine? 1.2200 0.05918 50 39 11 0
1725 No matter what happens between us, please don't accuse me of acting like I'm holier than thou. 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
1726 Well you know what they say, big halo . . . . 1.2200 0.08226 50 43 3 4
1727 Let me mansplain it to you. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1728 I'm not saying I'm holier than thou, but. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1729 Yours may be brighter, but mine doubles as a Hula hoop. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1730 Well, I think my holier than thou attitude is justified. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1731 Not to brag, but the LEDs also make it 90 percent more efficient. 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
1732 Let's just say the really exceptional thing about me isn't my personality. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1733 Halo. I love you. Won't you tell me your name? 1.2200 0.06571 50 40 9 1
1734 Careful, I'm not sure how big this thing is going to get! 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1735 I'm, you know, one of your "better" angels. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1736 You know size does matter. 1.2200 0.05918 50 39 11 0
1737 It was you who always said "Size doesn't matter." 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1738 I used my bonus miles to get the halo upgrade. 1.2200 0.05918 50 39 11 0
1739 Congratulations! You've made it through one more glass ceiling. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1740 Who knew God would be a woman? 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1741 No, I am not over compensating! 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1742 Yes, size matters. 1.2200 0.07714 50 42 5 3
1743 Let’s just say my conceptions are not immaculate. 1.2200 0.07166 50 41 7 2
1744 Yes, I do believe there's a correlation 1.2174 0.07558 46 38 6 2
1745 Well I think it looks vainglorious. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1746 I have large hands too. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1747 I know, I know, it's not the size that counts... 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1748 I know it's not very subtle, but I AM holier than thou! 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1749 Yes Tina, In Heaven size does matter. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1750 You know what they say about angels with large halos... 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1751 It's part of my retirement package. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1752 Yeah, doll, even up here there's a glass ceiling. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1753 It's like Pinocchio's nose... 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1754 You don't happen to have any polish I can borrow? 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1755 It's not the size of the halo that matters. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1756 I have room for two. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1757 It's not the size of your halo that matters it is how you use it 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
1758 Footwear? Size 14 medium, why do you ask? 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
1759 This sure beats a pitch fork, horns and a tail. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1760 It's true. The cloud is forever. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1761 Yes, its big. No, I am not overcompensating 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1762 Up here, it’s all concentric sex. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1763 Don't be fooled. I'm a bad boy. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1764 Actually, I find the halo hoop is a great way to stay fit. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1765 We'll have a marriage made in heaven. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1766 Well, you may not believe this, but, in a former life, I was Pinocchio. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1767 I think it's because of my "holier than thou" attitude. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1768 How about seven minutes of Heaven? 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1769 Wait a minute here. I was told it was until death do us part 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1770 I think we should go for "Holier than Thou." It works for me. 1.2157 0.05817 51 40 11 0
1771 I have to go back and take remedial sin. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1772 A woman who asked for a boob job her first day in heaven shouldn't talk! 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1773 It's not the size of you halo that matters, it's what you do with it. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1774 summa cum Lordie 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1775 Yes, there IS a correlation. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1776 I know halos. I've got the best halo. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1777 I earned it. Do you remember the movie, It's a Wonderful Life? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1778 'the box says to go to the hospital if it stays like this for 4,000 years' 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1779 I'm the patron saint of cornhole players. 1.2157 0.08075 51 44 3 4
1780 Not really. I just died at the height of the hula hoop craze. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1781 I was a late bloomer. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1782 Halo envy, my dear? 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1783 Hoola hoop contest winner. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1784 I'm holier than thou. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1785 I havn't done a lot since you dumped me in high school 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1786 With all the years I played Halo, I'm really not surprised. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1787 Bigger is better here too. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1788 Big feet, big halo, ... 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1789 Ok, ok, yes, I still have the receipt. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1790 Just because I'm holier than thou doesn't mean we can't remain friends and hang out like we used to. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1791 Well, if size mattered down there it certainly should matter up here! 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1792 Yeah! That's what she said. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1793 Nothing exceptional really. Just pi r-squared times four. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1794 I made pizza. You?? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1795 Sorry, but even here we circulate in different orbits. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1796 An Oedipal victory and a lifetime of virtue...but that's enough about me. How'd you end up here? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1797 I worked in fast food most of my life so they let me supersize it. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1798 It's true what they say about angels with large halos. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1799 No, I'm not compensating for anything, and no, I won't show you my hands. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1800 Is that your halo over your head or are you just happy to see me? 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1801 I can't sleep on my stomach. How do you manage? 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1802 Hi, I'm Adam. You must be Eve. Long time - no see. 1.2157 0.07037 51 42 7 2
1803 'Yes, I do know what they say about big halos.' 1.2157 0.08075 51 44 3 4
1804 Yeah, baby, and you know what THAT means... 1.2157 0.08075 51 44 3 4
1805 ...So then I died in a fire at the Wham-O factory. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1806 That's not a halo. It's a hole in the ceiling. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1807 Thanks, but wait until you see my hands. 1.2157 0.07574 51 43 5 3
1808 Sorry dear, it's just that we don't travel in the same circles. 1.2157 0.06456 51 41 9 1
1809 Well, I may be a little narcissistic.. 1.2143 0.07258 42 34 7 1
1810 .. yes.. and I'm Jewish.. 1.2143 0.08713 42 36 3 3
1811 Well, if you got equal pay you could have afforded this one. 1.2128 0.06757 47 38 8 1
1812 I'd rather be lucky than good. 1.2128 0.07410 47 39 6 2
1813 It turns out that halo enhancement surgery is sort of frowned on around here. 1.2128 0.06757 47 38 8 1
1814 Actually, I've found size does matter. 1.2128 0.06757 47 38 8 1
1815 Seriously? Size doesn't matter up here either? 1.2128 0.06757 47 38 8 1
1816 I told you to wear your seatbelt. 1.2128 0.06757 47 38 8 1
1817 Wham-o just took over halo production. 1.2128 0.06757 47 38 8 1
1818 Just so we are clear: I am not compensating for anything with this. 1.2128 0.08010 47 40 4 3
1819 Wow, I didn't know that size would matter up here. 1.2128 0.07410 47 39 6 2
1820 No, please...I'm a Jehovah's Witness, one virgin is enough. 1.2115 0.07438 52 44 5 3
1821 All I can say is there are a lot of school teachers up here, but I was the first politician. 1.2115 0.06344 52 42 9 1
1822 I thought it would shrink in the wash... 1.2115 0.06913 52 43 7 2
1823 Oh no, forget it, remember it was 'til death do us part. 1.2115 0.06913 52 43 7 2
1824 I have PlatinumMiles status and got upgraded. 1.2115 0.06913 52 43 7 2
1825 I swear I'm not compensating for something else. 1.2115 0.06913 52 43 7 2
1826 Welcome to Cloud 9 and yes I have big feet too. 1.2115 0.06913 52 43 7 2
1827 Well, I was the National Hula Hoop Champion of 1963. What about you? 1.2115 0.06344 52 42 9 1
1828 Even here ... size matters. 1.2115 0.06344 52 42 9 1
1829 Yeah, I created the Halo Hoop brand. Business is booming. 1.2115 0.06913 52 43 7 2
1830 I super-sized it in the fly-thru. 1.2115 0.06344 52 42 9 1
1831 I was from Texas 1.2115 0.06344 52 42 9 1
1832 Big feet, big hands, big halo! 1.2115 0.06913 52 43 7 2
1833 Its herniated; and my personal care doctor has been cast out of network. 1.2115 0.06913 52 43 7 2
1834 I'm having trouble with my 'bad boy' image. 1.2115 0.06344 52 42 9 1
1835 Actually, that email about enhancements wasn't a scam. 1.2115 0.06913 52 43 7 2
1836 Why yes, I am a graduate of Trump University. 1.2115 0.07438 52 44 5 3
1837 A massive heart attack while hula hooping. 1.2115 0.07438 52 44 5 3
1838 God knows there are virgins and there are virgins. 1.2115 0.07438 52 44 5 3
1839 it's not ego - I was just a hula-hoop salesman. 1.2115 0.07438 52 44 5 3
1840 Trump loaned it to me. 1.2083 0.07268 48 40 6 2
1841 I've got a big you know what. 1.2083 0.08400 48 42 2 4
1842 "What ever happened to equal halos for equal work? 1.2083 0.07268 48 40 6 2
1843 I can explain! 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
1844 After the date we can hula-hoop. 1.2083 0.07854 48 41 4 3
1845 There's no envy up here. 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
1846 I worked in a pizza place. You? 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
1847 No, sorry - just the halo. 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
1848 Yeah me and God. We're really tight. 1.2083 0.07268 48 40 6 2
1849 It's the Beam Me Up, Scotty app. 1.2083 0.05924 48 38 10 0
1850 I'm having it resized. I've lossed so much weight. 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
1851 I recently dropped gluten. 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
1852 If you smoked cigarettes you'd be able to do this too. 1.2083 0.07268 48 40 6 2
1853 Me? Oh, I owned a Pizza Restaurant! 1.2083 0.07268 48 40 6 2
1854 Trust me - in this case, heaven can definitely wait. 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
1855 My sins were bigger 1.2083 0.07854 48 41 4 3
1856 I'm accused of being a snob, but actually I died hula hooping. 1.2083 0.07854 48 41 4 3
1857 I'm sooo good, I'm bad. 1.2083 0.07268 48 40 6 2
1858 I get it!!! Women are tired of getting a 76% halo! 1.2083 0.07268 48 40 6 2
1859 i'm kind of a modest guy you know 1.2083 0.08400 48 42 2 4
1860 Touch it, it's real. 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
1861 I used to work for Apple. It's called an Infinity Loop. 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
1862 Why yes, I am good. I've always been very, very good! Why do you ask? 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
1863 You know what they say -- "the bigger the halo..." 1.2075 0.06793 53 44 7 2
1864 hello...or should i say halo 1.2075 0.07308 53 45 5 3
1865 My feet are big, too. 1.2045 0.08340 44 38 3 3
1866 Oh, halo-o... 1.2045 0.08340 44 38 3 3
1867 Why you little devil you. 1.2045 0.06958 44 36 7 1
1868 I asked for one matching my hand size. 1.2045 0.08340 44 38 3 3
1869 It happened since I decided to vote independent in the upcoming presidential election. 1.2045 0.06958 44 36 7 1
1870 Wow, this is my old hula hoop. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
1871 I know you're a Virgin but God instructed me to spread his holy seed. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1872 You thought "holier than thou" meant something else? 1.2041 0.08237 49 43 2 4
1873 wish it were true, but i think they mixed up our halos..... 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1874 Why yes it is true what they say about men with big halos. 1.2041 0.07704 49 42 4 3
1875 I want a divorce. 1.2041 0.08237 49 43 2 4
1876 We Mormons work hard. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1877 I got my halo at Costco. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1878 I assure you, everyone benefits from the newly privatized halo industry. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1879 Is it perfect here or is it just you? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1880 Yeah, I've been doing Cross Fit. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1881 They ran out of halos. I got a hula hoop. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
1882 I know, I've been meaning to make an appointment with my urologist. 1.2041 0.07704 49 42 4 3
1883 Even in Heaven I still can't impress women... 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
1884 It's part of the new merit system HR is rolling out.. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1885 See - I told you mine was bigger! 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1886 I kept my social media posts to a minimum. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1887 You know what they say about angels with big halos... 1.2041 0.07704 49 42 4 3
1888 Science said this is impossible. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1889 And you should see my hands. They're huge -- HUGE! 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1890 Oh goodness! Am I manspreading again? 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1891 I'm taking part in a study on halo growth hormone. 1.2041 0.07704 49 42 4 3
1892 When I order XXXL I assumed there would be some shrinkage. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
1893 I was the angel investor for hula hoop. 1.2041 0.07704 49 42 4 3
1894 On size fits all, my ass! 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
1895 Plastics. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1896 Be honest, can you see the string? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1897 Yeah, I get to use it until one of the Kardashians shows up. 1.2041 0.08237 49 43 2 4
1898 You'll like it here. Think of it as several steps above assisted living. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1899 I guess I'm just blessed. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1900 It helps my night vision. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1901 What makes you think there wouldn't be a glass halo here? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1902 I'm not saying that size matters, just that mine is bigger. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1903 Up here, this is the white man's burden. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1904 I negotiated a golden parachute clause. 1.2041 0.05817 49 39 10 0
1905 Extra credit for rejecting campaign contributions from the gun lobby. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1906 I do not judge people by the size of their halo. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1907 You're absolutly correct, I do have a "holier then thou" attitude. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1908 How'd you know I spent 12 years in Catholic school? 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1909 It gives me the space I need to spread my wings. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1910 Here too, size does matter 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1911 I used to be a fireman. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1912 I'm assigned to Trump. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1913 Far be it from me to say that I'm more blessed than anyone else, but someone around here certainly thinks so! 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1914 In my previous life I had very large hands. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1915 I don't know about thou, but I am holier than most. 1.2041 0.07131 49 41 6 2
1916 I OD'd on Viagra. 1.2041 0.06507 49 40 8 1
1917 I gave my first halo to charity. 1.2041 0.07704 49 42 4 3
1918 Even God had placed good money I'd go to Hell when I was born. 1.2041 0.08237 49 43 2 4
1919 Well, you know what they say? Big halo, big... 1.2031 0.06748 64 55 5 4
1920 It's not the size, it's what's inside that counts 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1921 My halo gets bigger when I don't tell the truth. 1.2000 0.06816 45 37 7 1
1922 Not exactly. They told me it represents how much better than other people I THOUGHT I was. 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
1923 I was a big-headed fool 'til I met you, Angel. 1.2000 0.07559 50 43 4 3
1924 Yes. Big on virtue. Short on experience. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1925 But yours looks more comfy. 1.2000 0.06030 45 36 9 0
1926 You excite me, Monica--even here of all places. 1.2000 0.07521 45 38 5 2
1927 I'm blessed. 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
1928 You can vote for whomever you want, it's the holier than thou attitude that I have an issue with. 1.2000 0.07559 50 43 4 3
1929 So you really were a shrink in your previous life. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1930 There's no overcompensating in heaven. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1931 When are you going to learn - everything's negotiable. 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
1932 Does a small hallo mean what I think it means ? 1.2000 0.08081 50 44 2 4
1933 It was part of class-action settlement against the Pearly Gate co. 1.2000 0.07559 50 43 4 3
1934 Let me guess. You were a priest. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1935 I'm compensating. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1936 I'm a high mileage, clean, one owner. 1.2000 0.06816 45 37 7 1
1937 Do you know what a big halo means, right? I'm a big chauvinist. We can't lie up here. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1938 I'd take tits over a big halo anyday. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1939 Yes Gloria, as you probably surmised, I do need this very loose robe." 1.2000 0.06030 45 36 9 0
1940 Of course it's not just the Halo... We also get pockets. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1941 Hello, My Name Is Pinocchio. 1.2000 0.08165 45 39 3 3
1942 It's apparently what happens when an erection lasts longer than four hours. 1.2000 0.06816 45 37 7 1
1943 Small hands - big halo 1.2000 0.07559 50 43 4 3
1944 That's the problem, you think bigger is always better. 1.2000 0.07559 50 43 4 3
1945 Well the wings were marked, "One size fits all." 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1946 I'd humblebrag about why, but then I'd lose it. 1.2000 0.08081 50 44 2 4
1947 Why do you need to see my hands? 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1948 Wow you're beautiful, did I live and go to Earth? 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1949 I am NOT trying to over compensate. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1950 No, that's just a myth. 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
1951 Go ahead and laugh, but the Large Halo was perfectly "hip" during the dawn of time. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1952 That's right; everything is proportional. 1.2000 0.06816 45 37 7 1
1953 What the halo, i'll wing it. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1954 I ordered the extra large halo from Amazon Prime 1.2000 0.06816 45 37 7 1
1955 I was a protester at a Donald Trump rally. 1.2000 0.07559 50 43 4 3
1956 I wish. Actually, they're inversely proportional 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1957 Didn't Saint Peter tell you about the Super Size offer? 1.2000 0.06030 45 36 9 0
1958 Mine is from Costco...! 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1959 All the cherubs are wearing them like this now. 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
1960 Don't be embarrassed, hon. Yours is supposed to be smaller. 1.2000 0.06030 45 36 9 0
1961 I wish we had met sooner. 1.2000 0.07559 50 43 4 3
1962 Size does matter here! 1.2000 0.08081 50 44 2 4
1963 'What can I say? I had to jump through a lot of hoops during my life........" 1.2000 0.07521 45 38 5 2
1964 Your virtue, no matter how small, is safe with me. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1965 So what, we made it didn't we? 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1966 Want to go to hell for the weekend? 1.2000 0.07521 45 38 5 2
1967 Yes, we seraphim get the cumulo-nimbus. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1968 Now you know that anything you can do, I can do better! 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1969 Not to brag, but I've lost a ton of weight since coming up here. 1.2000 0.07559 50 43 4 3
1970 Turns out, humility is not a virtue. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1971 Every time I say size doesn't matter, it gets bigger. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1972 So you see I was right in my "Holier Than Thou" attitude. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1973 And you know where good guys finish. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1974 It's the Trump Line...best hair, biggest halo, and enormous pockets for small hands. 1.2000 0.07559 50 43 4 3
1975 It's actually a repurposed hula hoop; the one I was using at the time. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1976 Me? I fell through a manhole! 1.2000 0.06816 45 37 7 1
1977 "Holier than thou?" Helluva joke lady. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1978 What in heaven's name would make you think I'm going through a mid-death crisis? 1.2000 0.05714 50 40 10 0
1979 With that neckline it doesn't surprise me too much." 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1980 I was breastfed. 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1981 Perhaps you should have been more diplomatic in the confessional. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1982 I lived my entire life in Texas. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1983 Truth be told, it's a hula hoop. 1.2000 0.07521 45 38 5 2
1984 This is what I wanted on the golf course, not up here! 1.2000 0.06389 50 41 8 1
1985 I know I seem too good to be true, but.... 1.2000 0.06816 45 37 7 1
1986 It"s bigger because I was a Democrat. 1.2000 0.06999 50 42 6 2
1987 It enables a better shower. 1.1961 0.07420 51 44 4 3
1988 It came as a free upgrade on my last flight! 1.1961 0.05615 51 41 10 0
1989 Heaven can wait. 1.1961 0.06871 51 43 6 2
1990 A match made in heaven! 1.1961 0.06871 51 43 6 2
1991 So yeah... it stretches when you use it as a frisbee. 1.1961 0.06275 51 42 8 1
1992 I do most of my work in Texas. 1.1961 0.06871 51 43 6 2
1993 Apparently, it's commensurate with ego. 1.1957 0.07369 46 39 5 2
1994 I,too, was once a little naughty. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
1995 I got this before I went on The Biggest Loser and lost 140 pounds but they won't change it in case I regain it. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
1996 Another one of those holier than thou types. 1.1957 0.05914 46 37 9 0
1997 It's actually the ozone hole caused by a certain New York tycoon's hairspray. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
1998 Sorry, you know what they say about men with big halos... 1.1957 0.07997 46 40 3 3
1999 Because I'm so humble. 1.1957 0.05914 46 37 9 0
2000 Well, you know what they say about halo size... 1.1957 0.07369 46 39 5 2
2001 I'm surprised you got in with your "holier than thou" attitude. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2002 I asked them to supersize it. 1.1957 0.05914 46 37 9 0
2003 No I’m not over compensating, I’m the inventor of the Hula Hoop. 1.1957 0.07997 46 40 3 3
2004 They're supposed to compensate for the loss of our penises. 1.1957 0.07369 46 39 5 2
2005 Yes, it is proportional. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2006 I was a virgin to the bitter end 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2007 My halo likes to compensate for a lot of things. 1.1957 0.07369 46 39 5 2
2008 Yeah, once I took a selfie with God, but, you know, it's no big deal. 1.1957 0.05914 46 37 9 0
2009 My father gave me a small loan of one-million good deeds. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2010 Why do people keep asking me if I invented the Hula Hoop? 1.1957 0.07369 46 39 5 2
2011 Well, yeah, baby, I did drive a fancy sportscar when I was alive. How did you know? 1.1957 0.07997 46 40 3 3
2012 Oh...just a lifetime of resistance training. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2013 Big wings, big halo. Do the math. 1.1957 0.07369 46 39 5 2
2014 You should trust the system. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2015 I played Eight Seasons with the Knicks. 1.1957 0.07997 46 40 3 3
2016 Remember when you told me to tip ten percent but I did fifteen? 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2017 Hula Hoop Champion, 1976, and you? 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2018 If it doesn't go back to normal in four hours call a doctor. 1.1957 0.07369 46 39 5 2
2019 No, I just loved to hula-hoop. 1.1957 0.05914 46 37 9 0
2020 Still not convinced my denomination was right? 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2021 I typed 'AMEN' in the comments. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2022 Oh, no no no no no - not overcompensating for anything. 1.1957 0.07369 46 39 5 2
2023 Do you even tithe? 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2024 I must have died and gone to heaven! 1.1957 0.07997 46 40 3 3
2025 Why, yes I am the founder of Whammo. How did you know? 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2026 You might say I was really meek. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2027 Well, obviously I am halo-ier than thou. 1.1957 0.07369 46 39 5 2
2028 I used to have an Afro. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2029 I'm looking at your eyes. 1.1957 0.07997 46 40 3 3
2030 If it were just up to me, you'd have a bigger halo already, but you have to understand that this place is very hierarchical. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2031 I had an ego problem on earth. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2032 I'd be happy to take you under my wing and show you around. 1.1957 0.06681 46 38 7 1
2033 Yeah...that's what they all say. 1.1923 0.06164 52 43 8 1
2034 Chauvinist! 1.1923 0.06164 52 43 8 1
2035 Fortunately, up here, size does matter. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2036 The truth is, they hold our impure thoughts. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2037 Yes, it is! 1.1915 0.08406 47 42 1 4
2038 Apparently "HE" was impressed with my invention of the Hula Hoop 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2039 I know what you're thinking, I can't lie up here, there's no connection. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2040 I had heard that size does matter. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2041 It's a hula hoop. They are out of halos until next week's delivery. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2042 I got the bigger one for letting you drive. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2043 You know what they say about men with small halos ... 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2044 'Holier than thou?' No, it's my hula hoop. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2045 I was a lot heavier down there. 1.1915 0.08406 47 42 1 4
2046 You're right. I HAVE lost weight. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2047 Wow. You must have been really good, huh? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2048 I'm in the preventative virtue program. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2049 It sets off metal detectors at the airport, and don't get me started on narrow doorways! 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2050 Turns out I was right all those times... 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2051 There are degrees of goodness. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2052 After looking at your robe, maybe my halo shouldn't be as large as it appears. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2053 While my king-size halo says I am very good, it doesn't say at what... 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2054 Since we can't see our feet up here, it's the size of a man's halo that's indicative of ... you know. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2055 Closing the gender pay gap is taking a little longer than we expected 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2056 In eternity, size matters more. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2057 I don't see the point of a prenuptial agreement. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2058 The temptation to correlate is infinite. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2059 I died during my mid-life crisis. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2060 Once, I had a dinner party with some "gluten sensitive" friends. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2061 Sometimes parking is a little tight, but I like it. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2062 I was able to give more than the ten percent. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2063 St. Peter ran our of halos, but he had some hula hoops left over from the sixties. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2064 I was told it will shrink in the rain. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2065 Of course I'm no angel. There's a hula hoop shortage, and I offered to teach the early morning classes. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2066 It's a little known verse - blessed is the bling. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2067 I'm not one to brag - but - I knew I had you at "halo." 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2068 Wow, those pills really do work don't they. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2069 Sure, the accolade is nice, but just try getting through a door with this thing. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2070 Then I went to the registration desk and they said, 'just take the f***ing halo and get out.' 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2071 I won it in a bet with Saint What's-His-Name. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2072 When I got up here I found out that size IS everything. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2073 The big halos go on sale every century or so. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2074 it's a bonus award from my visa account 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2075 Oh, this is not politically correct 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2076 PBS ran out of golf umbrellas. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2077 That's what St. Peter said. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2078 I cannot bear false witness; I'm overcompensating. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2079 Sorry, but this is what 'totally jacked with six-pack abs' means on the dating apps up here. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2080 Well you know what they say about Angels with big haloes. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2081 I was heir to the Wham-O fortune. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2082 It's for good behavior. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2083 What's a nice girl like you doing in a goody-goody place like this? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2084 Oh, I'm no hero, I just tried to help a few friends out when the shooting started! 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2085 My parents kept me on a curfew until I was 30. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2086 Rescued orphans from a fire? That sounds pretty cool. I taught my mom how to use her DVR. Hardly even cursed. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2087 You know what they about angels with big halos. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2088 No, I am not trying to be holier than thou.” 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2089 Believe me, Angelica. Size really DOES matter. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2090 Relax! It's a Hula Hoop. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2091 A little red guy with a long tail said that I would have more fun if I wore it up here. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2092 Wow! I'd love your help downsizing. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2093 It's the only size Amazon had left. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2094 The male version only comes in one size. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2095 Ultimately, size does matter. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2096 There's room for one more. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2097 These wings are super real and this definitely isn't a hula hoop. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2098 I was a really good hula hooper. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2099 They were out of my size. 1.1915 0.05801 47 38 9 0
2100 On the bright side, there's a lot less grit in the clams 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2101 I use to be in man holes. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2102 I was a Saint . 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2103 The gender pray gap is just a myth. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2104 Yes, it's true what they say about a one's halo size... 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2105 That's nothing. Wait 'til you see these bad boys in my pockets. 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2106 They only had Magnums 1.1915 0.07836 47 41 3 3
2107 The 6S Plus. Yours? 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2108 Is that a pizza on your head or are you just glad to see me? 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2109 Yeah... I'm Gay. 1.1915 0.06550 47 39 7 1
2110 Also, I am told I have huge hands. 1.1915 0.07222 47 40 5 2
2111 "I had to run through hoops to get here"! 1.1905 0.09169 42 38 0 4
2112 I lied at the gate and told them I was Mother Theresa. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2113 I'd feel better if we just cuddled. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2114 Come on over here and we'll make our halos concentric. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2115 They let me recycle my old hula hoop. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2116 There are no rules, you just wing it. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2117 You're preaching to the choir there, sister. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2118 It was to make up for my small hands 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2119 I know it's awkward. It's really a hula hoop. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2120 Fred! I had no idea we could pick our preferred gender up here! 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2121 It seems the Viagra Effect goes to your head up here. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2122 It's not the size that matters. It's how you use it. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2123 Yes, it's lovely here, but sometimes I miss arguing with agnostics. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2124 It's this big because I'm so humble. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2125 When you've been here long enough you get bonus points. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2126 Are you sure you're in the right place? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2127 My answer is still the same one I gave you in high school. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2128 You wanna bask in my aura tonight 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2129 You are an angel not to mention my big halo. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2130 My halo's not the only thing that's oversized. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2131 I fell through the manhole and I saw the light. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2132 E.otherworldly says we're a match made in heaven! 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2133 Yeah, well my ex-wife said I was always Holier than Thou. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2134 If my hands weren't in my pockets you'd understand. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2135 I'd reeeally like to...but there's this reputation I've gotta uphold. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2136 When I see a pretty girl, it grows larger. Can you imagine that? 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2137 I would be pleased to take you under my wing. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2138 Yes ma'am, I actually am holier-than-thou! 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2139 I was getting too close to certain angels. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2140 Sorry, I prefer bad boys. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2141 Really? You can tell it’s getting larger? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2142 Don't give me that look, but yes, it is true what they say about Angels with Big Halos..... 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2143 Yeah, I decided to go in for the full Cloud 10 package. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2144 Not exactly what I meant by "size matters." 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2145 Mine doubles as a lasso...what does yours do? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2146 Up here, it is the size that counts. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2147 You make me downright upright. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2148 "Halo," he said. " Well, HALO!" said she. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2149 Yes, Heaven knows, I'm happy to see you! 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2150 Yeah, you know what they say about guys with big halos. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2151 Big hands, big feet, big halo..... 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2152 Yeah, it's huge...why? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2153 If there's no Starbucks, I'm not staying! 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2154 Yes... size will ALWAYS matter... 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2155 It's a symbol of the hoops through which I had to jump to get here. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2156 Well you were the one who said I was hole-ier than thou... 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2157 Heavens yes, size does count. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2158 It's how you use it. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2159 He forgives, but He hasn't really forgotten, has He? 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2160 "I bought it on Ebay". 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2161 I also use it as a hula-hoop. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2162 I let my wife drive the Maserati. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2163 Well yes, I did invent the Hula Hoop. How did you guess? 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2164 I guess it gives extra points to remember the toilet seat. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2165 No. My feet are not that large. Why? 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2166 Sir, I think you're exaggerating. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2167 You're wrong. Size DOES matter. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2168 Funny how things are the same but different here. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2169 I'm supposed to work on my 'holier than thou' attitude. 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2170 You should see the one they're making for Beyoncé. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2171 There is a reason for my holier than thou attitude. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2172 I understand that Size Matters here, too 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2173 I've even named it. I call it "the Rapture." 1.1875 0.08239 48 43 1 4
2174 Did you know that I was dying to meet you again? 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2175 No, I'm not holier than thou. I got this so I can use it as a hula hoop. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2176 My family includes charter members of this place. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2177 Is it obvious? 1.1875 0.05693 48 39 9 0
2178 It's a complete myth that men overcompensate when they feel their masculinity is threatened. 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2179 You know what they say about angels with big halos, right? 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2180 it wouldn't be heaven if it wasn't true 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2181 It's a side effect of the Viagra. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2182 Oh, size matters, baby! 1.1875 0.07081 48 41 5 2
2183 I told you he wouldn't like it. 1.1875 0.07682 48 42 3 3
2184 I'm sorry but I only date double A halo's or better. 1.1875 0.06425 48 40 7 1
2185 I never buy anything "off the rack." 1.1860 0.08323 43 38 2 3
2186 I have seniority. 1.1860 0.06005 43 35 8 0
2187 My halo also serves as my umbrella. 1.1860 0.06865 43 36 6 1
2188 I got full coverage from Verizon. 1.1860 0.06005 43 35 8 0
2189 THIS is who I am to judge! 1.1860 0.06865 43 36 6 1
2190 Have I told you about the power of compound interest? 1.1860 0.06005 43 35 8 0
2191 See, even in Heaven: "Size does matter." 1.1852 0.05955 54 45 8 1
2192 I was holier than thou—clearly. 1.1837 0.06946 49 42 5 2
2193 Hey, I'm serious. My life was all about the hula-hoop, but now that's over thanks to these damn wings. 1.1837 0.06946 49 42 5 2
2194 Honestly, I hadn't noticed. 1.1837 0.06946 49 42 5 2
2195 Around here they say that size does matter 1.1837 0.06946 49 42 5 2
2196 I actually brought it with me. It was my favorite dollar store hula hoop. 1.1837 0.06304 49 41 7 1
2197 I’m not as good as I look. 1.1837 0.06946 49 42 5 2
2198 Some say my biggest sin is bragging about the size of my halo. 1.1837 0.06304 49 41 7 1
2199 Welcome, your timing is excellent. I'm as good as it gets 1.1837 0.06304 49 41 7 1
2200 I asked St. Peter to super-size me. 1.1837 0.06304 49 41 7 1
2201 So, as I was saying, I was a career politician . Since I am the only one of my kind up here I got the aggregate Halo. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2202 No, smarty pants, I am NOT trying to compensate for any of my earthly shortcomings. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2203 This is so embarrassing. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2204 It turns out He's pretty much OK with manspreading. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2205 Some angels are "more equal" than others. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2206 After I arrived I told Him I had been hoping for a bigger Hello. 1.1818 0.07466 44 38 4 2
2207 Yes, I'm over compensating for shortcomings in my previous life. 1.1818 0.06721 44 37 6 1
2208 I washed it in cold water 1.1818 0.08143 44 39 2 3
2209 the bigger the more... innocent? 1.1818 0.08143 44 39 2 3
2210 The worst part about gastric bypass surgery isn't the loose halo; its buying new robes! 1.1800 0.06815 50 43 5 2
2211 I bought it online 1.1786 0.07371 28 23 5 0
2212 Here you can lie as much as you want -- your nose won't grow. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2213 I always liked to think that size 'does' matter. 1.1778 0.07970 45 40 2 3
2214 I lived and died in Texas and I always wore a ten gallon hat. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2215 It all started with a Hula Hoop. 1.1778 0.07970 45 40 2 3
2216 You weren't offered the extended coverage option? 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2217 I guess size does matter! 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2218 Marilyn Monroe has an exclamation point. 1.1778 0.07970 45 40 2 3
2219 It's special recognition for inventing the hoopla hoop. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2220 Beyonce can see my halo better. 1.1778 0.07970 45 40 2 3
2221 You'll definitely want to get your parking validated. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2222 Yes, Virginia, there is a union. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2223 Yes, I have a big one, but I have other attributes as well. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2224 But last time I asked you said, "Not a chance in Hell!" 1.1778 0.05764 45 37 8 0
2225 I really am a bad boy, I swear. Well, I would never swear, but... 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2226 How could you tell I was lying. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2227 Seriously, I'm naturally this big. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2228 I hope you're one of those girls who thinks size matters. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2229 I wear a size 14EE. Why did you ask? 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2230 Why yes, I did invent the Hula Hoop. 1.1778 0.05764 45 37 8 0
2231 Honestly, I've seen much bigger. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2232 I drove a Porsche, why? 1.1778 0.05764 45 37 8 0
2233 If only feeling holier-than-thou were a virtue! 1.1778 0.08581 45 41 0 4
2234 I had it custommade 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2235 "That halo will be a lot smaller when I finish with him.". 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2236 I won't make snap judgements if you don't. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2237 WHAT DID I KNOW..I ASKED FOR AN EXTRA LARGE. 1.1778 0.05764 45 37 8 0
2238 Well, you know what they say about the size of a man's halo. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2239 Admit it, halo envy. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2240 I'm not that innocent. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2241 Remember me? I lost some weight, but kept the old halo. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2242 Well, you know what they say about guys with big halos? 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2243 I was perfect at hula hoop, too. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2244 It's just a holier-than-thou fashion statement I'm trying out 1.1778 0.05764 45 37 8 0
2245 Let's ditch the halos and get on with it 1.1778 0.05764 45 37 8 0
2246 Heaven's got one heck of a weight loss program. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2247 Actually it's just a hula hoop. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2248 You know that thing about big hands? Well, it works for halos too. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2249 Hula hooping accident, what about you? 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2250 After I lost my third halo, St Peter refused to give me a new one. I found me this hula hoop in lost and found. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2251 So we're going to play the "my halo's bigger than your halo" game?! 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2252 You could probably tell by my hands. 1.1778 0.07970 45 40 2 3
2253 Go to bed with me and I'll tell you. 1.1778 0.05764 45 37 8 0
2254 You should see the size of my feet. 1.1778 0.07970 45 40 2 3
2255 You can't tell me that size doesn't matter. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2256 I'm the guy who cancelled "19 Kids and Counting." 1.1778 0.07970 45 40 2 3
2257 I demanded the expanded version of humility. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2258 I'm telling you without 'Pride' that I made Angel of the Month. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2259 They will say this is a match made in heaven. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2260 Yes, that too. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2261 Well, size is a respected dimension even around here. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2262 I used to have a swollen head but I've humbled down! 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2263 I told the greeter 'Supersize me' and he did! 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2264 The Halo supplier made a mistake and sent me a Hula. 1.1778 0.07309 45 39 4 2
2265 You know what they say about the angel with the big halo..... 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2266 Of course I'm a feminist. 1.1778 0.05764 45 37 8 0
2267 I used to say Heaven can Wait but now I'm sorry I did. 1.1778 0.07970 45 40 2 3
2268 You appeared less judgmental in your Tinder profile. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2269 Yes, size matters in heaven. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2270 It was a hula accident. How did you get here? 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2271 And to think, you always said size doesn't matter. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2272 You know what they say about angels with big halos, don't you? 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2273 I let the size of my halo do the talking. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2274 I hate to brag but I come from a long time of big halos. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2275 How can you reject me based on the size of my halo? I have large hands as well! 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2276 You know what they say about male angels with large halos. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2277 It appears that we Republicans have once again thwarted 'equal halos for equal virtues.' 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2278 I used to be a lot bigger. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2279 Mine is a hole in the glass ceiling. Yours is just a halo. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2280 My uncontrollable flatulence has created the hole in the ozone layer above my head. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2281 Yeah, what they say about guys with large halos is true. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2282 Come back and interview again when your halo is more fully developed. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2283 I can fly through it too. 1.1739 0.07805 46 41 2 3
2284 So size does matter? 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2285 It's a bit understated for my taste, but you make it work. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2286 Serving Vatican City helps. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2287 Yes, as a matter of fact there is a correlation 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2288 Don't laugh. It was the only one in stock when I got here. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2289 I'm really not compensating for anything. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2290 I know it looks big, but it's comfortable. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2291 Kylie, you make my halo swell 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2292 'Hula-Hoop-Halo' just had a ring to it. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2293 Pretty as you are, you're going to get 76% of what male angels earn. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2294 Believe me, I am really good. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2295 I know, it looks ridiculous. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2296 There's really no need to overcompensate up here. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2297 Don't act like you're not impressed. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2298 I cannot tell a lie. It's my hula-hoop. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2299 What do you mean, what am I compensating for? 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2300 When I look at you, I get... larger than life! 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2301 Don't give me that holier than thou look 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2302 I was a professional hula hooper and St. Peter thought it funny to constantly remind me of it. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2303 I'm holier than thou only because I swore off discussing politics on Facebook. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2304 Sorry, I'm waiting for my husband to die. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2305 I was famous for my ten-gallon hats. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2306 You have beautiful...eh... wings. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2307 You can't argue with God. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2308 It would be in your best interest to "Dry Clean Only" 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2309 Yes, I must humbly admit, it is unusually large. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2310 It mattered on Earth, of course, but I'm sure it doesn't count for anything here. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2311 Want to do something that will make us lose our wings? 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2312 I was a halo of a man when I was on earth 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2313 Well, I wouldn't want to brag, of course, but . . . . 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2314 They need to do something about regulating drones up here. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2315 I hate to brag, but up here, size does matter. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2316 Dry-clean only. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2317 She was surprised to discover that even in heaven size matters. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2318 I brought the potato salad to the church picnic. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2319 Let's make a cherub. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2320 Beyonce lent it to me. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2321 You know what they say, big halo small d... 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2322 My hands are very big too. Very, very big. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2323 I'm on Weight Watchers. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2324 Well Halo to you too. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2325 What do you mean, 'holier than thou'? 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2326 Not only that but I wear a size fourteen shoe. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2327 My halo doubles as a hula hoop 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2328 Why yes, I do have large hands. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2329 You're beautiful, but it appears our lifestyles aren't compatible 1.1739 0.07805 46 41 2 3
2330 I didn't realize there was such a big difference between large and extra large. 1.1739 0.07805 46 41 2 3
2331 Did He not tell you? You'll have to carry that thing around for all eternity. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2332 I like sticking my hands in my pants. like this. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2333 It humors the boss too. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2334 Well maybe God loves you. But God loves me more. Because I’m so humble. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2335 Until it's fixed, I'm stuck with the hula hoop 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2336 I'm a bachelor; I haven't washed it yet. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2337 I had house seats for HAMILTON. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2338 My head was much bigger before I had some lessons in humility. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2339 You said size mattered. 1.1739 0.07805 46 41 2 3
2340 Halo, gorgeous! 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2341 I am one of the very few males around here who wasn’t called a no good bastard by a female. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2342 Yes, in Heaven, size matters, too. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2343 I told you to check the expiration date. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2344 I made it to this year's top five in humility. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2345 My gluten-free, kale-based snacks blog helped God lose a ton of weight. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2346 I've got a very big halo, that I can tell you. As far as other things, I guarantee you there's no problem. I guarantee it. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2347 Your halo is very, very low energy. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2348 It equates to the opposite of small hands. 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2349 That's my new halo hoop. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2350 It was a tough choice. 1.1739 0.07805 46 41 2 3
2351 Before you say that size doesn't matter... 1.1739 0.06449 46 39 6 1
2352 Are you a summer intern? 1.1739 0.07805 46 41 2 3
2353 Mine's a shower, not a grower. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2354 I guess it's because I'm holier than thou. 1.1739 0.07159 46 40 4 2
2355 I see that size does matter. 1.1739 0.05650 46 38 8 0
2356 Well, you know what they say about large haloes... 1.1739 0.07805 46 41 2 3
2357 How did you know that I made it myself? 1.1707 0.07732 41 36 3 2
2358 Who says size doesn't matter? 1.1707 0.05949 41 34 7 0
2359 I leaned in. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2360 I try not to notice it. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2361 The William Morris Agency. Why do you ask? 1.1702 0.07646 47 42 2 3
2362 and it comes with pockets, too 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2363 First time here? 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2364 You have to jump through lots of hoops to become a perfect angel. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2365 My app went viral. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2366 How aura? 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2367 Listen, I know you said I'm too good for you but I don't agree... 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2368 You thought the wage gap was only a problem on earth? 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2369 For the last two years I bet on the Warriors. How did you get here? 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2370 I actually left the bathrobe right there in the hotel. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2371 Bragging is so much easier here than Earth 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2372 Well, yes, there is some correlation between the size of my halo and the size of my feet. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2373 Don't feel bad. I'm just nicer than you. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2374 I'm dilated you made it here! 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2375 Hello, I'm Johnny Angel, and together we will see how lovely heaven can be. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2376 I had just taken a Viagra pill when I died of a heart attach. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2377 As it turns out, size really does matter. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2378 Yea, it's my attitude, holier than thou. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2379 It's the only way you can compensate up here. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2380 My mother always told me, 'Sanctimonious is as sanctimonious does'. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2381 They were having a sale at Skymall... 1.1702 0.07646 47 42 2 3
2382 I come from a family with big heads. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2383 Still having an after life crisis huh Dave? 1.1702 0.07646 47 42 2 3
2384 Size doesn't matter. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2385 Alas, what happens in Vegas definitely does not stay in Vegas. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2386 Oh yeah, it's what you'd think 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2387 Holier than thou? Maybe a little. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2388 I was an inventor for Wham-O. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2389 You know what they say--the larger the halo..... 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2390 If I told you how I really feel about you, I sure wouldn't be here right now. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2391 I ordered the recreational model . . . 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2392 I'm just saying, a plunging neckline may invite some unwanted attention. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2393 I'm compensating after the fact. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2394 I worked in a pizza parlor. 1.1702 0.07646 47 42 2 3
2395 Eve, she meant nothing to me. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2396 So you see you can take it with you. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2397 Excuse me. Would you say this is fostering an excessive sense of entitlement? 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2398 Why do say I think I'm too good for you? 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2399 I don't like to brag, but Sully Sullenberger had a little help from yours truly. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2400 Bigger is better. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2401 Don't tell. It's a hula-hoop. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2402 Let's go ask Archimedes. I'll bet he'll have the answer! 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2403 And my hands are slightly larger than normal, too. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2404 I was wearing a Sombrero at the time of the accident... 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2405 I know. It's so big and round. I call it my J-LO 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2406 Take it from me, being an angel isn't all that it's cracked up to be... 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2407 Greetings, I'm Adam Holier Than Thou. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2408 Trade ya. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2409 Yes, it is - and I've noticed a lot of you girls here have halo envy. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2410 My wings don't let me use my hula hoop. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2411 Can we hook up now? 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2412 It's like pinocchio, except for good deeds 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2413 I don't want to play the evangelical card, but . . . 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2414 I believe the circumference of one's halo is proportional to one's holiness. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2415 I remember you, you had a big head when you were our manager! 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2416 Up here, hand size is irrelevant; it's all about the halo. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2417 You're dumping me in Heaven. Who Does That!? 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2418 Well, if you think THIS is big, you should check out my hands. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2419 Nobody liked it on America's Got Talent either. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2420 It tarnishes easily. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2421 It's very simple, Sweetheart, I'm a transgender. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2422 I guess they never discovered the SEC Indictment 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2423 I defeated St Peter in the Mythic Legendary Halo championship match. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2424 Where I grew up, bragging was considered a virtue. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2425 In another world and in another time, yes size would matter. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2426 Well you see Penelope, I got in on the ground floor of the reformation 1.1702 0.07646 47 42 2 3
2427 Really it's just hula hoop. I brought it with me. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2428 The large halo? Well, I've always been very competitive. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2429 Yeah, New Yorkers hate when I call this place "Los Angeles." 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2430 ...Most Likes... 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2431 Yes, I hold myself in high esteem. Why do you ask? 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2432 I was a philanthropist. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2433 My halo's not fat...he just has a thyroid issue. 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2434 Jezebel. That's an interesting name. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2435 They fitted me for a Trump halo 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2436 I still think metric is the more perfect system. 1.1702 0.07646 47 42 2 3
2437 I need all the help I can get 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2438 Are the other six as lovely as you? 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2439 I died while hula-hooping. 1.1702 0.07015 47 41 4 2
2440 My mother said my halo was my best feature. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2441 It's not hegemonic masculinity, it's just that God has favorites 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2442 Well you know what they say about a man's "halo". 1.1702 0.06321 47 40 6 1
2443 Not to worry. It grows on you. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2444 Oh for heaven's sake yes. Size matters. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2445 There may be some lingering resentment. 1.1702 0.05541 47 39 8 0
2446 I'm hoping to become an archangel. 1.1667 0.07493 48 43 2 3
2447 It's not a halo, it's a portal to another world. If ya know what I mean. 1.1667 0.06745 42 36 5 1
2448 They call me 'Mr. Holier-than-thou' around the water cooler. 1.1667 0.06198 48 41 6 1
2449 I'm suddenly kinda bummed by this non-corporeal existence thing. 1.1667 0.06198 48 41 6 1
2450 You know the saying; big halo, big.... 1.1667 0.06876 48 42 4 2
2451 It was the Lamborghini that got us here in the first place and you're STILL overcompensating? 1.1667 0.06876 48 42 4 2
2452 I was an early investor in Halo. 1.1667 0.06745 42 36 5 1
2453 I requested one with a sprinkler system for.... well.... you know, just in case. 1.1667 0.07493 48 43 2 3
2454 But mine is platinum. 1.1667 0.06198 48 41 6 1
2455 It's got great perks, but I miss going head to head with all those little devils. 1.1667 0.06198 48 41 6 1
2456 It's my old hula hoop. 1.1667 0.07493 48 43 2 3
2457 I guess it's a man's heaven. 1.1667 0.07557 42 37 3 2
2458 It's a rental. Sometimes, I need to feel Godly. 1.1667 0.06198 48 41 6 1
2459 If only you hadn’t gone away for that weekend with your boss, Sally 1.1667 0.06745 42 36 5 1
2460 I lost 130 lbs on the Paleo diet 1.1633 0.06743 49 43 4 2
2461 I've been touched by an allergy. 1.1633 0.06743 49 43 4 2
2462 Wanna go populate a planet? 1.1633 0.06743 49 43 4 2
2463 No, it was easy, I asked for "XL" in my last confession. 1.1628 0.06597 43 37 5 1
2464 I don't like to brag, but since you asked: I was an ace hula-hooper back on Earth. 1.1628 0.05696 43 36 7 0
2465 It's Heaven's equivalent of a 'Dunce' cap. 1.1628 0.06597 43 37 5 1
2466 It's actually just a hole in the glass ceiling. 1.1628 0.05696 43 36 7 0
2467 People laughed when they saw my drawer full of 'Box Tops For Education'... 1.1628 0.06597 43 37 5 1
2468 I'm down 350 lbs postmortem, and I've never felt better! 1.1628 0.07389 43 38 3 2
2469 No I don't think that I'm overcompensating. 1.1628 0.07389 43 38 3 2
2470 Yeah, it's bigger since I went gluten free 1.1628 0.05696 43 36 7 0
2471 He likes me..... 1.1628 0.05696 43 36 7 0
2472 I think we both know that size does matter. 1.1628 0.06597 43 37 5 1
2473 I must be in heaven because you look like an angel. 1.1628 0.06597 43 37 5 1
2474 I sinned less, that's why I have a bigger one. 1.1628 0.06597 43 37 5 1
2475 C'mon let's give it a whirl. 1.1628 0.07389 43 38 3 2
2476 You oughta see my feet. 1.1628 0.08104 43 39 1 3
2477 I'm confess, this whole heaven and angel thing is still over my head. 1.1628 0.05696 43 36 7 0
2478 Looks like you'r headed for sainthood. 1.1628 0.06597 43 37 5 1
2479 No, seriously, you look like an angel sent from Heaven! 1.1628 0.06597 43 37 5 1
2480 I'm sorry. I don't believe we are compatible. 1.1628 0.07389 43 38 3 2
2481 I invented the Hula Hoop, why do you ask? 1.1628 0.05696 43 36 7 0
2482 Raaally Dahling, all I can say is if the halo fits... 1.1628 0.06597 43 37 5 1
2483 Actually, this is Hell. Wait 'til you see the wage gap. 1.1628 0.06597 43 37 5 1
2484 It's the same here. Size does matter. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2485 Yes, I know it's a hula hoop. 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2486 Hey, foreplay on the freeway was your idea. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2487 Muhammad & Prince are still in orientation, they let me use their halos. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2488 gays get the supersize 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2489 Yes, I do have big hands and feet also. Why do you ask? 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2490 You look almost devilish today. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2491 My halo didn't get this big by doing what you're suggesting. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2492 It doubles as a hula hoop. 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2493 Come on. It's a fair trade. My hula hoop for your Frisbee. 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2494 Well, Hayllo... 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2495 Cloud computing copy error. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2496 Let's just say Trump would never call me Little Marco. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2497 Compensating?! No no, I was an ego maniac 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2498 Yeah, it makes up not being able to see one's feet. 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2499 I had small hands. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2500 Come on, Beth, why the smerk? You know what they say...big halo... 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2501 God thought it would compensate for my small hands.... 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2502 Yeah, 'I know, rack dry, but how could I guess about some fabrics stretching? 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2503 Its actually a hula hoop. I was junior champion back in the day. 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2504 No, I'm not still overcompensating! 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2505 Yup, it's true what they say. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2506 Don't give me that look. I am literally holier than thou. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2507 Recycling inititative, the hula hoop seemed a better choice than the Popemobile tire. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2508 Something tells me that you're overcompensating. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2509 Well this is what God gave me. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2510 It's because I'm holier than thou. In other words I'm a Vegan. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2511 I was a professional Hula Hooper. 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2512 I think he liked my sit-com. 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2513 I knew when I met you I wasn't good enough for you 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2514 Thank the lord for "AngelMatch.com!" 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2515 not only is my halo bigger than most, but God asks for my counsel frequently 1.1591 0.07926 44 40 1 3
2516 My! Your's is really big, isn't it? 1.1591 0.07926 44 40 1 3
2517 I don't like to rush into things, as you can see. 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2518 You know what they say about big halos... 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2519 It must've been that little blue pill I took before I died. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2520 I've told you all along that God was a HE! 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2521 R e a l l y, Holier than thou! 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2522 My high school taught abstinence-only. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2523 Yes, it does make it easier to see where I'm going at night. 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2524 Wish I could , but I am scheduled to be rightsized in about 20 minutes. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2525 Sorry, but Halo Inequality is not a Sin up here. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2526 It's my God Hole. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2527 Maybe couples skydiving wasn't such a good idea. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2528 We could always work something out.... 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2529 And what would make you think I earn more than you? 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2530 I assure you, size doesn't matter. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2531 I told you buying indulgences would be work 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2532 You know what they say about halo size... 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2533 OMG! Is that a huge Halo, or are you just happy to see me? 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2534 Till death do us part seemed long enough to me. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2535 Ohhh . . . my . . . God! 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2536 So, you recall me as having an oversized ego? 1.1591 0.05578 44 37 7 0
2537 I'm supposed to say size doesn't matter... 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2538 On the terrestrial plane I was something of a chick magnet. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2539 I was the former US Hoola Hoop champion. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2540 WOW ! I was afraid you would be some crazy guy with B.O. and a beard. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2541 Let me guess, Wall Street?! 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2542 The devil made me do it! 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2543 Yes it's big, but do you know how to use it? 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2544 You know what they say about giant halos ... 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2545 I promise. I won't let it go to my head. 1.1591 0.07229 44 39 3 2
2546 My. What a big Halo you have... 1.1579 0.08024 38 34 2 2
2547 I thought it would be different in heaven, thanks be to God! 1.1562 0.06521 32 27 5 0
2548 I'm not compensating for anything, I swear! 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2549 I gave at the office. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2550 How can you not find 'holier than thou' attractive? 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2551 I used to own a pizza restaurant. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2552 I couldn't take my Porsche with me. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2553 I know it's weird....but I have small hands. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2554 I don't mean to brag, but you know what they say about angels with large halos. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2555 People say I have a holier than thou attitude. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2556 I have a wide stance. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2557 You know what they say about angels with huge halos? 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2558 I prefer highly over heavenly endowed, and you? 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2559 I never thought I'd die to regret inventing the hula hoop. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2560 You know what they say about large halos, don't you? 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2561 I'm on strict probation; one bad move and out I go through this hole above my head. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2562 'Glass cloud'? I don't know what you mean. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2563 You'll love it here. There's no other gated community like it. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2564 My first hula hoop. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2565 Up here you can earn a whole 85 cents on the dollar! 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2566 I paid for a heavenly upgrade! It includes extra headroom. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2567 If this job has taught me anything, it's to look beyond appearances. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2568 I don't know… I was playing with a Hula-Hoop and it just sorta stayed up there. So here I am. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2569 Talk about jumping through hoops. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2570 Why, yes. Yes I am. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2571 Don't give me that look just because I have a swelled halo. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2572 All they left was the extra-extra large. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2573 The XL sizes were on sale. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2574 No, my hands are also large. I'm just keeping them warm. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2575 Soon you will have a big enough head to fit that Halo. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2576 I got nicknamed, 'Holier than Thou'. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2577 It's a side effect of my ED treatment. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2578 Yes, my halo has grown since you arrived 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2579 Yes, Virginia, there is a glass ceiling in Heaven also. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2580 Being the "Guardian Angel of Hula Hoops" has its perks. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2581 I heard St. Peter was bad at geometry, so I told him it 4piR. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2582 So I said to Gabriel, "Believe me, I know die-ameter." But seriously...... 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2583 Lemme guess. On Earth you drove a muscle car. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2584 Is that happiness to see me? 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2585 I guess you didn't 'lean in'. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2586 It's called a 'Morning Glory.' 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2587 Stand back honey, I don't know how big this thing gets. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2588 I prefer to call it an areola 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2589 Look, Honey, size matters! 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2590 You know what they say about a man with a large halo. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2591 Don't let the small hands fool you. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2592 Some are just more holy. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2593 I was Donald Trump's hairstylist. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2594 Oh, Honey. You'll make friends. I mean, being alive wasn't all peaches and cream either. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2595 I was even my mother's favorite. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2596 Apparently I have a big head. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2597 My halo is huge. So huge, you won't believe how huge it is. 1.1556 0.07756 45 41 1 3
2598 Remember, Eve, I was always holier than thou. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2599 Up here, size matters! 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2600 I hula on weekends. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2601 Mine was very popular in the '50s. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2602 I bet you wish you’d liked that post about the sick kid now, huh? 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2603 You do know what they say about men with big halos. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2604 This is why it's called heaven. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2605 I thought I'd dress up! 1.1556 0.07756 45 41 1 3
2606 I used to have a much bigger head. Dying kinda humbles you. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2607 Does this make my feet look big? 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2608 It means I've been more saintly and have had less sex, but I'll take any opportunity to shrink it. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2609 It's called the 'halo affect'—it makes me ridiculously holier than thou. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2610 I know, it's awful. I haven't had a proper sleep in weeks. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2611 I told you I'm a grower. 1.1556 0.07756 45 41 1 3
2612 Well, yeah, obviously THOU. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2613 I got fifty of them from Costco. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2614 You know about they say about angels with big halos .... 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2615 You can say what you like, yet I believe HE decides..: 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2616 I deleted his account. 1.1556 0.07756 45 41 1 3
2617 Please give me a chance. I’m a bad boy at heart! 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2618 Hula hoop champion in 1959. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2619 Thanks. Wish I could say the same thing about my, um, hands. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2620 yea,big hands,big feet,big halo and you know the rest. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2621 I guess I'm just more hole-y than you. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2622 I know people in high places plus I was an Eagle Scout. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2623 Oh, it definitely grows. But it takes time... 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2624 I left my harddrive on the cloud. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2625 It’s a rental; One size fits all. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2626 It's the wide screen HD model, with omniscient remote. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2627 I swear it does not make your butt look big. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2628 Well HAY-LOOO there! 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2629 It matches my hands 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2630 It's genetic. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2631 Ha-lo, beautiful! 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2632 Halo, it's me I was wondering if after all these years you'd like to notice me. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2633 Oh, I was under the impression that it was til death do us part. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2634 No, I don't notice any difference. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2635 Well, yeah, it's true, but it's not like it's going to do us any good up here. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2636 Welcome to heaven for metrics analysts. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2637 I am sure it will shrink over time. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2638 Does it make my hands look small? 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2639 Well "halo," good looking. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2640 I invented the hula hoop. What did you do? 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2641 Without a doubt, I'm holier than you. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2642 You know what they say, everything's bigger in Texas... 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2643 I'm on 9 with a 10! 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2644 You're STILL making me jump through hoops. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2645 And I have small hands! 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2646 Come, I'll introduce you to Mother Teresa... 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2647 Let's put it this way. My hands aren't tiny either. 1.1556 0.07756 45 41 1 3
2648 Small, yes, but with a great view. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2649 It was another hula hoop related death. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2650 Tinder? Never heard of it. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2651 It just means I've been here a lot longer... 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2652 If this angel stuff doesn't work out, I could always light my halo on fire and join the circus... 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2653 What? I'm from Texas. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2654 As long as it doesn't last longer than four hours, we're cool. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2655 I got it at a garage sale. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2656 God got a good laugh. I asked for a bigger one cause my hands were so small. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2657 Wow, those on-line dating services do work! 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2658 I'm not an idiot. You have a much smaller hole to get through to the next level than I. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2659 Yes, as a matter of fact I was a big Donnie Osmond fan. Why do you ask? 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2660 Told you. My religion was the true one. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2661 Up here the only thing of size that matters is your halo 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2662 I found my halo on Amazon. They deliver if you specify the cloud number. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2663 And if you get tired of being holy, you can use it as a hula hoop. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2664 My death was caused by a hula hoop. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2665 Look, up here, the halo is only related to the size of your ego! 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2666 What gender halo gap? There is no gender halo gap. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2667 Yes, it does mean that. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2668 Look at my halo. Is that a small halo? I guarantee there is no problem 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2669 Mine is biggest. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2670 I guarantee you there's no problem. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2671 I'm not saying I'm "Holier than thou," I just think my idea is better. 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2672 As they say, big halo..... 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2673 You're right, I shouldn't have had that last beer. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2674 Yeah, the Man personally designated me a "Holier Than Thou" kind of guy. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2675 Well, if you wanted a normal angel, your profile should have said "Spiritual, but not religious"! 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2676 I've got to be honest: bigger isn't necessarily better. 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2677 ''Just call me archangel of the morning angel." 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2678 Wham-O dot com 1.1556 0.05464 45 38 7 0
2679 I'm really not over compensating 1.1556 0.07075 45 40 3 2
2680 No it's " divine compensation" if you must know. 1.1538 0.06910 39 34 4 1
2681 Circular reasoning got me here and it's growing on me. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2682 You know that’s just a Hula Hoop. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2683 I thought he said Hulu not Halo 1.1522 0.07593 46 42 1 3
2684 You know, it's true what they say you can tell about a man from the size of his halo. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2685 I rather enjoy being thought of as larger than life. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2686 I went with the 1st class upgrade 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2687 I think it's time to take a "cold shower".? 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2688 They don't believe in wormholes up here! 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2689 No, no. I'm not any better than you. I was simply a whiz with a hula hoop down there. 1.1522 0.07593 46 42 1 3
2690 I am not compensating for any inadequacies. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2691 The better to lasso you with, my dear! 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2692 Look who thinks he's "Man's gift to God! 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2693 Is your halo compensating for something? 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2694 Welcome! Glad you came! 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2695 Being headstrong has it's perks. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2696 It's especially handy at night 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2697 Apparently envy is no longer one of the seven deadly sins. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2698 It's based on the gender pay gap 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2699 My name's Charlie. I collect angels. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2700 I'm afraid my 'bad boy' act won't work any more. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2701 The Big Guy wanted an angel he can slam dunk. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2702 You're Saint Peter!" Do you know Caitlyn Jenner? 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2703 The size of my halo is directly related to the fact that I died with you. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2704 There's plenty of room under here if you want to know what it feels like to have a big one. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2705 Are you a Virgin? Your halo tells me you are! 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2706 I was the most honest and helpful employee at Costco 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2707 The trickle down effect will work...just give it time. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2708 So. God is really a guy after all. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2709 Of course, he only lets his closest friends call him Jeezy Creezy. 1.1522 0.07593 46 42 1 3
2710 How did I do it? Clean thinking and no meat on Fridays. That's really it. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2711 True, I was a virgin. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2712 No, I an not still compensating. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2713 I know that mine is bigger than yours but remember that envy is one of the seven deadly sins. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2714 I died during the Hula Hoop craze. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2715 Actually the halo size shows your Heaven age, it's like a tree! 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2716 Be honest. Does it make me look phat? 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2717 I am a believer in equal rights. Your halo should be as large as mine! 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2718 Shit! I coulda had more fun! 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2719 I haven't slept a wink since I had this one installed. It's like an alien beacon up there. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2720 My name is Trump. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2721 Is that a halo or a hole in the ceiling? 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2722 It's a NextGen Halo that doubles as a mood ring. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2723 You know what they say about the size of an angel's halo.. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2724 I know what you're thinking. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2725 The forecast's calling for rain. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2726 Unfortunately, it's not what you think. Hula hoop champion, 6th grade. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2727 And wait until you see my hands. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2728 I see you are still using Viagra. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2729 I still remain holier than thou 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2730 I am just keeping it warm. The Greatest arrives this week. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2731 I told you to let God win that last round of Halo XBOX 360. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2732 Hula Hoop inventor..how d'ya guess? 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2733 It was either Hell or the size of the hole I created in the ozone layer. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2734 My carry-on luggage always fitted into the airline test box. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2735 Face it, angel face, you're just jealous. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2736 I agree, equal halos for equal good deeds! 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2737 You can't fly through yours, can you?" 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2738 Ringworm is actually quite common. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2739 You see, I was the priest who banned hula hoops. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2740 I got extra credit for trying to ban assault weapons and high-volume bullet magazines. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2741 I guess that Woman Card doesn't get you everything. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2742 Yeah, lets just say the halos get pretty picked over when there is half price sale. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2743 So Pride and Envy are no longer Sins of Exclusion. Who knew? 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2744 Seriously, it's not because I'm a man. In life, I was a hula hoop champ. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2745 isn't it time for equal halos for equal good deeds? 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2746 I had a wider circle of friends. I suppose. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2747 Perhaps I should've used another pet name for you besides "Angel". 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2748 Actually, I was Donald Trump's alter ego. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2749 I would have been here sooner if i knew about the dating service! 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2750 Well, I really do have 400 years on you. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2751 Yes, dear, I'm afraid that size still matters. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2752 How about coming over here under my ring?? 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2753 I know it's smaller, but I had a better time down there. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2754 Well, it's the girth, not the length, that really counts. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2755 well it is my birthday. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2756 HE said I should reuse/recycle my old hoola hoop. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2757 Does my halo look too big? 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2758 Evidently size does matter. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2759 Up here, size really does matter. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2760 Excuse me woman.. is that a frisbee on your head? 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2761 I have big hands too. 1.1522 0.07593 46 42 1 3
2762 don't say it , I know , I should have got out more 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2763 I didn't manspread. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2764 I got it at Ross 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2765 So much for equal pay for equal work. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2766 I never used Twitter to complain about my flight. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2767 I think because it helps balance out my extreme shoe size? 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2768 I admit it--I have a Napoleon complex. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2769 The Devil offered me a much better benefit plan, but c'mon it's Hell down there. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2770 Oh, the size? Well, it doubles as a portal between here and there. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2771 I guess I have a pretty big hoop to jump through 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2772 What glass ceiling? 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2773 You'll find that is is a job you eventually grow into. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2774 Well, yes. It's really just a hula hoop. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2775 Big shoes, ....... 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2776 Where's God? 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2777 The regular size was out-of-stock. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2778 Let me show you about venn diagrams 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2779 I was really good. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2780 Well, yes, I am blessed in that way. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2781 And they said I didn't have a superego. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2782 Yeah, It is proportional to the size of my halo 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2783 You know, it's true what they say about the size of a guy's halo. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2784 I took the prime option. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2785 Well, you know what they say about an angel with a big halo... 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2786 I know you usually go for more of the "bad boy type," but I think we'd be a match made in heaven. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2787 "Could you really help me shrink my halo? How? 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2788 You know what they say, Big halo, big . . ." 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2789 Guess who asked for directions to the heavenly bathroom then put the seat down? 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2790 You'll never believe how very hard I had to work to earn it! 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2791 Your halo is writing checks your body can't cash. 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2792 I was in a hula hoop accident. And you? 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2793 Halooooooooo 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2794 Halo, Big Spender… 1.1522 0.07593 46 42 1 3
2795 Yes, my halo's smaller, but it slips down and holds my hair in place. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2796 Am I in the right place? 1.1522 0.06191 46 40 5 1
2797 It's a Hula Halo.. 1.1522 0.05354 46 39 7 0
2798 He didn't get the memo about my recent bariatric surgery. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2799 Once you reach 1 million rotations, you can swap out for the hula hoop. 1.1522 0.06928 46 41 3 2
2800 That's a myth. 1.1522 0.06191 46