Contest #521


Cartoon

521


Name Value
Submission deadline -
Voting started 2016-05-09
Voting ended -
Finalists announced -
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued 2016-05-22 (estimated)
Number of captions 5176
Number of responses 183912
Number of participants 7980


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 Go and check if it's still raining. I'll wait here. 2.0134 0.01677 1936 514 882 540
1 Well, I thought your mother was joining us... 1.8654 0.03129 654 259 224 171
2 I thought your mother was joining us. 1.8457 0.03750 486 209 143 134
3 I'm in the Wetness Protection Program. 1.8189 0.04130 370 156 125 89
4 They said, 'widespread showers.' 1.8176 0.03959 340 127 148 65
5 I doubled my contribution to PBS. 1.7832 0.04426 309 134 108 67
6 I'm under the Wetness Protection Program. 1.7786 0.04944 262 119 82 61
7 Now that the kids are grown, maybe we should downsize. 1.7726 0.03976 321 126 142 53
8 It's too big to fail. 1.7705 0.04598 292 131 97 64
9 You should have seen the mai tai. 1.7568 0.05243 222 101 74 47
10 I donated a few million to PBS. 1.7468 0.05126 233 108 76 49
11 I made a really big donation to Channel Thirteen. 1.7181 0.05892 188 95 51 42
12 Must you stand so close? 1.7121 0.05373 198 93 69 36
13 I heard they were calling for widespread showers 1.7092 0.05023 196 85 83 28
14 I thought El Nino was going to be a bigger deal. 1.7071 0.07632 99 47 34 18
15 I asked for additional coverage and they sent me this. 1.7023 0.05253 215 105 69 41
16 Imagine my relief when it finally started raining. 1.6963 0.06505 135 65 46 24
17 I thought your mother was coming. 1.6914 0.05654 175 84 61 30
18 The downside is one windy day I ended up in New Jersey. 1.6893 0.05994 177 92 48 37
19 You should have seen the drink it came in. 1.6879 0.05830 173 86 55 32
20 Poppins. James Poppins. 1.6829 0.06223 164 86 44 34
21 Texas. Why do you ask? 1.6806 0.06511 144 74 42 28
22 It looked smaller on my phone. 1.6786 0.05427 168 77 68 23
23 I'm a big hit at the bus stop 1.6779 0.05968 149 71 55 23
24 At Costco. Why do you ask? 1.6767 0.06962 133 71 34 28
25 I was confused . . . their sign said, "Giant Umbrella Sale! 1.6757 0.06447 148 77 42 29
26 Get your own. 1.6750 0.05984 160 80 52 28
27 Actually, the ad was quite clear: 'Big Umbrella Sale' 1.6742 0.06317 132 63 49 20
28 It's less about staying dry and more about annoying other people. 1.6731 0.05618 156 72 63 21
29 When it's windy, I can be uptown in seven minutes. 1.6667 0.06221 153 79 46 28
30 The umbrella policy is nice, but it provides more coverage than I really need. 1.6609 0.05376 174 83 67 24
31 If the wind picks up we won't need a taxi. 1.6607 0.05526 168 81 63 24
32 Opening it indoors actually does seem to be bad luck. 1.6604 0.06298 159 86 41 32
33 The forecast called for widely scattered showers. 1.6597 0.06246 144 73 47 24
34 Maybe we should downsize now that the kids are gone. 1.6573 0.06363 143 74 44 25
35 If there's a gust, I'll just meet you there. 1.6514 0.06694 109 52 43 14
36 My ex-wife got everything except the patio furniture. 1.6471 0.06601 119 59 43 17
37 I'm very popular at the bus stop. 1.6454 0.05526 141 64 63 14
38 When it pours, I reign. 1.6423 0.06531 137 73 40 24
39 Now that the kids are gone, maybe we should get something smaller. 1.6419 0.06140 148 77 47 24
40 New to Seattle? 1.6383 0.05806 141 68 56 17
41 It's the Bernie umbrella; everyone's covered. 1.6379 0.07181 116 63 32 21
42 This is the Republican solution for climate change. 1.6378 0.07130 127 72 29 26
43 Sorry, did my landing startle you? 1.6371 0.06611 124 64 41 19
44 We have to go back. I forgot my hat. 1.6364 0.06943 121 65 35 21
45 She got the condo. I got the umbrella. 1.6364 0.06566 132 70 40 22
46 You should have seen the margarita! 1.6349 0.06724 126 67 38 21
47 Haven't lost it yet. 1.6341 0.06456 123 62 44 17
48 You should've seen the pina colada it came in. 1.6336 0.06610 131 70 39 22
49 Check to see if it's still raining. 1.6328 0.06359 128 65 45 18
50 I misunderstood the "Giant Umbrella Sale" sign. 1.6316 0.06620 133 72 38 23
51 It's rated "cats and dogs". 1.6308 0.06832 130 72 34 24
52 The small was only like 20 cents less. 1.6299 0.06874 127 70 34 23
53 The other ones made me look fat. 1.6299 0.05600 154 76 59 19
54 It looked smaller on Amazon. 1.6296 0.07035 108 56 36 16
55 You should have have seen the cocktail it came out of. 1.6271 0.06679 118 61 40 17
56 I'm a sucker for an upgrade. 1.6271 0.06230 118 57 48 13
57 It didn't look that big on my phone. 1.6240 0.06878 125 69 34 22
58 My wife is always trying to catch me on Google Earth. 1.6239 0.06729 117 61 39 17
59 "What I actually ordered was a New York Giants umbrella". 1.6220 0.06607 127 68 39 20
60 You told me to bring extra protection. 1.6186 0.06693 118 62 39 17
61 They predicted widespread showers. 1.6176 0.06973 102 52 37 13
62 I know it's huge, but I thought your mother was joining us. 1.6134 0.06970 119 66 33 20
63 Where did we park the Hummer? 1.6106 0.07159 113 63 31 19
64 I don't get wet, but I sometimes end up in New Jersey. 1.6102 0.07225 118 68 28 22
65 What makes you think my parents were overprotective? 1.6091 0.06967 110 59 35 16
66 I'll bet we don't lose this one. 1.6053 0.07006 114 63 33 18
67 Now the children have gone, maybe we should consider downsizing. 1.6042 0.05506 144 71 59 14
68 Of course it's 'over the top' . . . where else would I put it? 1.6017 0.07335 118 70 25 23
69 Sorry, but we have five more Ümbrella-sharers to pick up before I can drop you off. 1.6000 0.07110 105 57 33 15
70 I sometimes get carried away. 1.5965 0.07127 114 65 30 19
71 Now that the kids have left, we should downsize. 1.5946 0.06447 111 57 42 12
72 I always mess up the metric conversions when ordering stuff from Europe. 1.5946 0.06188 111 55 46 10
73 Unfortunately I can't keep it up for very long. 1.5946 0.06697 111 59 38 14
74 You should've seen the Mai Tai I found it in. 1.5941 0.07601 101 58 26 17
75 It's guaranteed for forty days and forty nights. 1.5926 0.06450 108 55 42 11
76 They love me at the bus stop! 1.5922 0.06821 103 54 37 12
77 It really is bad luck to open this thing inside. 1.5918 0.07514 98 55 28 15
78 However, I have never lost it. 1.5913 0.07084 115 66 30 19
79 Why, yes, I do drive a Hummer. How did you know? 1.5905 0.07498 105 61 26 18
80 Why can't I ever get a cab when it rains? 1.5905 0.06992 105 57 34 14
81 Here, let me overprotect you. 1.5904 0.08047 83 46 25 12
82 I still haven't figured out the settings on my 3D printer. 1.5900 0.07120 100 54 33 13
83 I had no idea how this was going to unfold. 1.5882 0.07287 102 57 30 15
84 The forecast said widespread rainfall. 1.5849 0.06818 106 57 36 13
85 I was expecting cats and dogs. 1.5842 0.07212 101 56 31 14
86 I've led a largely sheltered life. 1.5842 0.07212 101 56 31 14
87 If the others don't show up, this is gonna look pretty stupid. 1.5842 0.07482 101 58 27 16
88 You're crowding me. 1.5833 0.07204 96 52 32 12
89 You should have seen the drink this was in. 1.5824 0.07978 91 53 23 15
90 You can't be too careful with suede. 1.5810 0.07004 105 58 33 14
91 It diverts attention from my tiny hands. 1.5789 0.07419 95 53 29 13
92 It's ideal for widely scattered showers. 1.5789 0.07267 95 52 31 12
93 They're saying forty days and forty nights. 1.5784 0.07027 102 56 33 13
94 I live a very sheltered life. 1.5758 0.07047 99 54 33 12
95 On a windy day, I’m home in ten minutes. 1.5753 0.08706 73 42 20 11
96 It's only a problem if we want to go anywhere. 1.5743 0.07223 101 57 30 14
97 If the wind is right I can skip the train. 1.5729 0.07063 96 52 33 11
98 I think I've been working in risk assessment too long. 1.5729 0.07063 96 52 33 11
99 It's just my dry sense of humor. 1.5714 0.07836 91 53 24 14
100 52nd Street? Just walk to the far end of the umbrella and hang a right. 1.5700 0.06705 100 53 37 10
101 I was expecting a larger turnout. 1.5699 0.07072 93 50 33 10
102 You should have seen the size of the drink it came in! 1.5686 0.07440 102 60 26 16
103 The weather report said widespread showers. 1.5684 0.06801 95 50 36 9
104 I borrowed it from Chris Christie. 1.5684 0.07431 95 54 28 13
105 Not sure why, but my shoulder always hurts when it rain. 1.5682 0.08209 88 53 20 15
106 Yes, this does mean our patio furniture is getting wet. 1.5638 0.07795 94 56 23 15
107 I took the liberty of bringing extra protection. 1.5625 0.07377 96 55 28 13
108 I had a coupon. 1.5600 0.07696 100 61 22 17
109 So just how much weight did you lose? 1.5581 0.07864 86 50 24 12
110 Now that the kids have grown up, I think it's time we downsized. 1.5568 0.07382 88 49 29 10
111 At least I've never lost it. 1.5556 0.07086 90 49 32 9
112 They're calling for widespread showers. 1.5543 0.07784 92 55 23 14
113 It looked smaller on-line. 1.5517 0.07267 87 48 30 9
114 The saleswoman said it made me look thinner. 1.5484 0.07414 93 54 27 12
115 I got tired of losing them. 1.5484 0.07414 93 54 27 12
116 Suede shoes. 1.5476 0.07461 84 47 28 9
117 It was so nice of Governer Christie to lend you his umbrella. 1.5476 0.08194 84 51 20 13
118 Like YOU'VE never swiped something from a hotel. 1.5476 0.07651 84 48 26 10
119 What do you mean you'd like to come over to my place. This is my place. 1.5476 0.07266 84 46 30 8
120 Two words: Rewards points. 1.5465 0.07334 86 48 29 9
121 Turns out that a huge-umbrella policy is not the same as a huge umbrella-policy. 1.5444 0.07269 90 51 29 10
122 If it weren't raining, I'd feel like an idiot carrying this thing. 1.5432 0.08434 81 50 18 13
123 I went with grey, so it wouldn't draw attention. 1.5432 0.08434 81 50 18 13
124 Poppins. Fred Poppins. 1.5432 0.08249 81 49 20 12
125 It looked smaller when I ordered it on my phone. 1.5422 0.08095 83 50 21 12
126 Do you think it makes my hands look small? 1.5422 0.07724 83 48 25 10
127 The forecast calls for widespread showers. 1.5412 0.07588 85 49 26 10
128 The acoustics are wonderful. 1.5412 0.07012 85 46 32 7
129 Admit it. Size matters. 1.5402 0.07634 87 51 25 11
130 I was hoping for a larger turnout. 1.5402 0.07090 87 48 31 8
131 They're picking us up. How shall I describe us? 1.5402 0.07457 87 50 27 10
132 Would you mind stepping out to see if the rain has stopped? 1.5385 0.07229 78 42 30 6
133 This is an UberPool umbrella - we'll be making stops along the way. 1.5385 0.08098 78 46 22 10
134 They said the rain would be widespread. 1.5375 0.08333 80 49 19 12
135 My tailor said it would make me look slimmer. 1.5366 0.07402 82 46 28 8
136 I'm not singing in the rain, but I soon could be blowing in the wind. 1.5366 0.08175 82 50 20 12
137 The problem is I can't tell when it stops raining. 1.5366 0.07603 82 47 26 9
138 Just a precaution. We're about to walk under my ex wife's window. 1.5364 0.06416 110 62 37 11
139 Those were some giant mai tais. 1.5357 0.08024 84 51 21 12
140 This is what you get if you don't qualify for a golden parachute. 1.5349 0.08052 86 53 20 13
141 Well, I stopped at Costco to buy bananas . . . 1.5347 0.07388 101 62 24 15
142 This IS our health coverage. 1.5333 0.08128 75 44 22 9
143 They said it was one size fits all. 1.5333 0.08768 75 47 16 12
144 I kept losing my old ones. 1.5326 0.07485 92 55 25 12
145 The salesman assured me it would be too big to fail. 1.5325 0.07970 77 45 23 9
146 You won't get wet. It's too big to fail. 1.5316 0.08223 79 48 20 11
147 They said the same thing to Noah. 1.5309 0.08067 81 49 21 11
148 If it's sunny tomorrow, we can share my sombrero. 1.5309 0.07675 81 47 25 9
149 Is it still raining? 1.5309 0.07471 81 46 27 8
150 What do you mean, overcompensating? 1.5309 0.07874 81 48 23 10
151 Well, Mom always warned us smoking would stunt our growth. 1.5309 0.08256 81 50 19 12
152 Umbrella-pooling is the next big thing. 1.5286 0.08321 70 41 21 8
153 This one should be a bit harder to lose. 1.5278 0.08149 72 42 22 8
154 I’ve been saving this for a rainy day. 1.5263 0.08476 76 47 18 11
155 Is there an angry, wet hot dog vendor following me? 1.5263 0.08680 76 48 16 12
156 In case of cats and dogs. 1.5263 0.07603 76 43 26 7
157 I've lost some weight. 1.5263 0.08051 76 45 22 9
158 You should have seen the piña colada it came in. 1.5256 0.07896 78 46 23 9
159 A gust and we're screwed. 1.5256 0.07896 78 46 23 9
160 The problem was I kept losing them. 1.5246 0.09235 61 37 16 8
161 I'm telling you, when the wind picks up we can be in Hoboken in a matter of minutes. 1.5244 0.07609 82 48 25 9
162 It's only for superdelegates. 1.5244 0.07609 82 48 25 9
163 I got it in Texas. 1.5244 0.07408 82 47 27 8
164 Nothing is ever big enough for you. 1.5244 0.07408 82 47 27 8
165 No one's gonna rain on my damn parade! 1.5238 0.07080 84 47 30 7
166 Sure it was expensive, but I'd put some money away for a rainy day. 1.5233 0.07158 86 49 29 8
167 I can be a little overprotective at times 1.5224 0.08601 67 40 19 8
168 I saved for a rainy day. 1.5217 0.07891 69 39 24 6
169 Wait till you see the mai tai. 1.5217 0.07802 92 58 20 14
170 Excuse me but you're in my personal space. 1.5211 0.07733 71 40 25 6
171 Gift from the Viagra rep. 1.5205 0.09578 73 50 8 15
172 Harry Poppins, at your service, Mum. 1.5200 0.07678 75 43 25 7
173 It's Hard to tell the size on Amazon. 1.5195 0.07534 77 44 26 7
174 The weatherman forecast widespread showers. 1.5195 0.07975 77 46 22 9
175 The only thing my ex-wife let me keep was the patio furniture. 1.5195 0.07758 77 45 24 8
176 Now that the kids are gone maybe we should consider downsizing. 1.5195 0.07975 77 46 22 9
177 It’s the Republicans’ way of dealing with climate change. 1.5195 0.08187 77 47 20 10
178 It came with the Monsoon Tiki Cocktail. 1.5190 0.08228 79 49 19 11
179 Chivalry is not dead but it's a lot heavier. 1.5190 0.08228 79 49 19 11
180 I just blew into town. 1.5185 0.07267 81 46 28 7
181 They were predicting widely-scattered showers. 1.5185 0.07477 81 47 26 8
182 It's guaranteed against cats and dogs 1.5181 0.08461 83 54 15 14
183 It comes with wifi. 1.5176 0.07598 85 51 24 10
184 It's just a metaphor. 1.5176 0.08133 85 54 18 13
185 Would you like to see the upstairs? 1.5143 0.08571 70 43 18 9
186 You should have seen the cocktail! 1.5143 0.08326 70 42 20 8
187 I'm in risk management. 1.5139 0.07659 72 41 25 6
188 These are very expensive shoes! 1.5139 0.08390 72 44 19 9
189 I'm not compensating for anything, why do you ask? 1.5135 0.08441 74 46 18 10
190 I also make mountains out of molehills. 1.5135 0.08218 74 45 20 9
191 You should see the piña colada this came with. 1.5125 0.07333 80 46 27 7
192 You don't seriously expect me to put down my jacket, too. 1.5125 0.07753 80 48 23 9
193 I'm flying to Chicago on the next gust. 1.5119 0.07084 84 48 29 7
194 now that you've finally lost all that weight, can we please get a new umbrella 1.5088 0.09407 57 35 15 7
195 You should see my umbrella stand. 1.5085 0.09165 59 36 16 7
196 "I drive a Hummer. Why do you ask? 1.5072 0.08418 69 42 19 8
197 You should have seen the size of the cocktail! 1.5072 0.08418 69 42 19 8
198 I feel you’ve misallocated our rainy day fund. 1.5072 0.07620 69 39 25 5
199 Why don't you get your own umbrella? 1.5070 0.08943 71 46 14 11
200 Don't worry, this umbrella is too big to fail. 1.5070 0.07992 71 42 22 7
201 Is the trench coat too much? 1.5068 0.08072 73 44 21 8
202 We'll be picking up a few others along the way. 1.5068 0.07067 73 40 29 4
203 ''Look for a taxi with a sunroof.'' 1.5067 0.08568 75 48 16 11
204 You should have seen the size of the drink. 1.5067 0.08137 75 46 20 9
205 You should see my sunglasses. 1.5065 0.07978 77 47 21 9
206 The G.O.P. didn't need it anymore. 1.5063 0.08803 79 53 12 14
207 The beauty is I don’t have to remember it, no one lets me forget it. 1.5063 0.08031 79 49 20 10
208 Who knew they use centimeters on European eBay? 1.5062 0.07479 81 48 25 8
209 Better safe than soggy. 1.5062 0.07881 81 50 21 10
210 On windy days I get home faster. 1.5000 0.07132 72 40 28 4
211 You should see the size of my golf clubs. 1.5000 0.09012 68 44 14 10
212 This umbrella is specially made for widely scattered showers. 1.5000 0.07263 74 42 27 5
213 I'm really going to miss SkyMall. 1.5000 0.07978 68 40 22 6
214 This is the smallest one they had at Costco 1.5000 0.08333 64 38 20 6
215 The best thing is that Mexico is paying for it. 1.5000 0.08899 52 30 18 4
216 Sometimes size actually does matter. 1.5000 0.08328 70 43 19 8
217 The sign said "big umbrella sale!" 1.5000 0.08442 74 47 17 10
218 I was expecting a bigger flash-mob. 1.5000 0.08573 70 44 17 9
219 It's great, but I can never get a taxi. 1.5000 0.08704 66 41 17 8
220 I'm glad I didn't get the large. 1.5000 0.07661 72 42 24 6
221 But it came with free WiFi. 1.4933 0.07912 75 46 21 8
222 With the right breeze it cuts my commute in half. 1.4933 0.07912 75 46 21 8
223 It's only a problem if it stays open longer than four hours. 1.4933 0.07443 75 44 25 6
224 They're calling for scattered cats with a fifty percent chance of dog. 1.4932 0.08965 73 49 12 12
225 I negotiated for a Golden Parachute, but this was all they were offering. 1.4930 0.07992 71 43 21 7
226 Ironically it sometimes forms little rainclouds on the inside. 1.4930 0.08481 71 45 17 9
227 I'm preparing for climate change! 1.4928 0.07335 69 39 26 4
228 Sometimes, instead of an elevator, I just jump. 1.4925 0.08605 67 42 17 8
229 We should downsize now that the kids are in college. 1.4925 0.07481 67 38 25 4
230 I am always popular at a bus stop 1.4923 0.08240 65 39 20 6
231 It was on sale at Trump's. 1.4923 0.08804 65 41 16 8
232 I'm just glad I didn't get talked into buying the big one. 1.4923 0.08804 65 41 16 8
233 Admit it Betty, size does matter! 1.4923 0.09073 65 42 14 9
234 No Marylin. This umbrella doesn't make you look fat. 1.4923 0.07943 65 38 22 5
235 I’d like to see Gene Kelly swinging around a lamp post holding this little baby! 1.4923 0.07943 65 38 22 5
236 Compensating for what? 1.4921 0.09015 63 40 15 8
237 I always seem to lose the other ones. 1.4918 0.09531 61 40 12 9
238 If you think the umbrella's big, you should see my rubbers. 1.4918 0.09531 61 40 12 9
239 Two more payments and it's ours. 1.4918 0.08939 61 38 16 7
240 I was closing it yesterday and got trapped for three hours. 1.4918 0.08628 61 37 18 6
241 My ex-wife got the house. 1.4912 0.08715 57 34 18 5
242 Some punks stole my Hot Dog Cart. 1.4865 0.08218 74 47 18 9
243 Excuse me, Ma'am, but you're in my personal space. 1.4857 0.08074 70 43 20 7
244 I have a lot of rainy day friends. 1.4857 0.08074 70 43 20 7
245 This is nothing, you should see my brother's galoshes. 1.4857 0.08074 70 43 20 7
246 I thought you wanted some space. 1.4853 0.08247 68 42 19 7
247 Sure, it's great now, but the last time we had a strong wind I ended up in Cleveland. 1.4853 0.08509 68 43 17 8
248 "Excuse me, is it still raining out there? 1.4853 0.07976 68 41 21 6
249 I really thought more people would show up. 1.4853 0.08247 68 42 19 7
250 You'll thank me when it starts raining cats and dogs. 1.4853 0.08247 68 42 19 7
251 I figured, why not? We rarely use the patio anyway. 1.4853 0.07976 68 41 21 6
252 You can never be too rich, too thin or too dry. 1.4848 0.08702 66 42 16 8
253 It’s the Seattle model. 1.4848 0.07555 66 38 24 4
254 Janet got the beach house, I got the Christo. 1.4848 0.08702 66 42 16 8
255 Here's my bus; you keep it. 1.4844 0.08624 64 40 17 7
256 That about covers it. 1.4844 0.08624 64 40 17 7
257 I no longer mind the rain, it's the wind that's a problem. 1.4839 0.08829 62 39 16 7
258 Didn't I tell you? I work for a large umbrella corporation 1.4839 0.09124 62 40 14 8
259 When you said "Don't rain on my parade" I assumed you had a parade. 1.4839 0.08525 62 38 18 6
260 I just moved here from Seattle. 1.4833 0.08731 60 37 17 6
261 Now that the kids are gone, maybe we should think of putting this old umbrella on the market and get something more manageable. 1.4828 0.08950 58 36 16 6
262 I speak softly, but I carry a big umbrella. 1.4821 0.09532 56 36 13 7
263 It is part of my severance package from Traveler's 1.4810 0.08029 79 51 18 10
264 I was expecting more people to show up. 1.4800 0.07194 75 44 26 5
265 Well, it's cheaper than an apartment. 1.4795 0.08069 73 46 19 8
266 This is actually my third one. It's so easy to lose them! 1.4783 0.08664 69 45 15 9
267 I was in Texas last week. 1.4783 0.08157 69 43 19 7
268 New Yorker cartoon caption contests prefer dry humor. 1.4783 0.08664 69 45 15 9
269 After 40 days it becomes a life raft. 1.4783 0.07331 69 40 25 4
270 Wall Street bonuses sure aren't what they used to be. 1.4776 0.07773 67 40 22 5
271 I just got tired of losing them 1.4776 0.07773 67 40 22 5
272 I need some space, Marilyn. 1.4776 0.08860 67 44 14 9
273 The sign said, "Giant Umbrella Sale". 1.4769 0.07938 65 39 21 5
274 The forecast called for widespread rain. 1.4769 0.08236 65 40 19 6
275 Nancy was hoping a strong gust of wind would finally bring an end to an awkward first date. 1.4769 0.08800 65 42 15 8
276 I'm overprotective. 1.4769 0.07938 65 39 21 5
277 Well you're always going on about how size matters. 1.4762 0.08722 63 40 16 7
278 I'm from Seattle. Why? 1.4762 0.08114 63 38 20 5
279 In New York this would go for $3,500/mo. 1.4762 0.08722 63 40 16 7
280 I bought it when I lived in Seattle. 1.4762 0.08423 63 39 18 6
281 I want to make umbrellas great again. 1.4762 0.08114 63 38 20 5
282 It was specially designed for the plain in Spain. 1.4762 0.09011 63 41 14 8
283 " I have to stop saying "Super-size Me". 1.4762 0.08722 63 40 16 7
284 It's tricky. You've got to know how to hold 'em, know how to fold 'em. 1.4762 0.08423 63 39 18 6
285 If a sudden wind comes up I may have to leave 1.4754 0.08623 61 38 17 6
286 They said cats and dogs. 1.4746 0.08498 59 36 18 5
287 They told me it would shrink in the rain. 1.4727 0.09304 55 35 14 6
288 You know what they say about men with large umbrellas." 1.4722 0.08149 72 46 18 8
289 No, it's not a policy but it will cover the car. 1.4717 0.09564 53 34 13 6
290 I've been saving for a rainy day. 1.4717 0.08772 53 32 17 4
291 Perhaps we don't need to buy everything at Costco. 1.4697 0.08142 66 41 19 6
292 Get your own umbrella. 1.4697 0.08142 66 41 19 6
293 Last week a gust of wind took me to Staten Island 1.4697 0.08142 66 41 19 6
294 The forecast was for widely scattered showers. 1.4697 0.08696 66 43 15 8
295 You NEVER listen to me. I said grab the umbrella on the patio, not the patio umbrella! 1.4697 0.08423 66 42 17 7
296 I figured that you were more important than the patio table. 1.4691 0.06824 81 48 28 5
297 They offered me a golden parachute but I thought this would be more practical. 1.4688 0.08900 64 42 14 8
298 They call it the Poppins 3000. 1.4688 0.08021 64 39 20 5
299 This is the best I could do for housing in Manhattan. 1.4688 0.08021 64 39 20 5
300 It's a wild ride, but on a breezy day it'll get me uptown in about five minutes. 1.4688 0.08021 64 39 20 5
301 It didn't look this big on Amazon 1.4688 0.07705 64 38 22 4
302 They predicted wide spread rain. 1.4688 0.08021 64 39 20 5
303 I got it at Trump Tower 1.4667 0.08723 60 38 16 6
304 It's also rated for light meteor showers. 1.4667 0.09041 60 39 14 7
305 I was expecting more of a crowd. 1.4667 0.07690 60 35 22 3
306 Well, it's from Costco. 1.4658 0.08521 73 49 14 10
307 If it rains any harder we'll need the big umbrella. 1.4658 0.08062 73 47 18 8
308 Let's make umbrellas great again! 1.4655 0.08941 58 37 15 6
309 You know that 'cats and dogs' is a metaphor, right? 1.4655 0.08941 58 37 15 6
310 Wasn't it nice of Governor Christie to lend me his umbrella? 1.4655 0.09594 58 39 11 8
311 You want me to lay my jacket down too?? 1.4655 0.08596 58 36 17 5
312 I suppose you feel I'm being over protective of you. 1.4648 0.07725 71 44 21 6
313 They predicted cats and dogs. 1.4643 0.09175 56 36 14 6
314 I asked for a big umbrella policy, and this is what they gave me. 1.4630 0.08239 54 32 19 3
315 Honey, with the kids gone, we really should downsize. 1.4630 0.08239 54 32 19 3
316 I've saved 30 years for this rainy day! Can't we just enjoy it? 1.4630 0.09425 54 35 13 6
317 Could you hold this while I put down my coat for you? 1.4630 0.09789 54 36 11 7
318 It's just the ticket for wide-spread showers. 1.4615 0.08514 65 42 16 7
319 I don't think it makes you look fat. 1.4615 0.09297 52 33 14 5
320 Hand me the binoculars so I can see if it's raining. 1.4615 0.08792 65 43 14 8
321 Sure, it keeps us dry, but it's not making it any easier to get a cab. 1.4615 0.08227 65 41 18 6
322 That about covers it . . . . 1.4615 0.08227 65 41 18 6
323 And to El Nino I say -- bring it. 1.4603 0.08414 63 40 17 6
324 ...and it is easy to find and practically impossible to lose! 1.4603 0.07781 63 38 21 4
325 It also comes in medium, large, and extra-large. 1.4603 0.09002 63 42 13 8
326 I'll never leave this one behind. 1.4603 0.07781 63 38 21 4
327 You have to be careful - Google Earth’s everywhere 1.4603 0.08104 63 39 19 5
328 We've covered a lot of ground today! 1.4590 0.09225 61 41 12 8
329 This curbside loft space is airy and just seconds away from the crosstown bus - $3400/month, with occasional roommates. 1.4590 0.08924 61 40 14 7
330 I was sick of always losing them. 1.4590 0.07953 61 37 20 4
331 Remind me not to leave this in the taxi. 1.4590 0.09225 61 41 12 8
332 Is the coat too much? 1.4590 0.08924 61 40 14 7
333 Yeah yeah, I know - you're ex had a bigger one. 1.4576 0.08824 59 38 15 6
334 You can never be too rich or too dry. 1.4576 0.08135 59 36 19 4
335 Costco. 1.4576 0.09149 59 39 13 7
336 A gust of wind is coming. I love you. 1.4576 0.08824 59 38 15 6
337 I found it lying at the base of a huge beanstalk. 1.4576 0.08486 59 37 17 5
338 Watch out for the puddle. 1.4576 0.09463 59 40 11 8
339 My whole family's been under the weather. 1.4576 0.08486 59 37 17 5
340 It's from the Julie Andrews collection. 1.4571 0.08312 70 46 16 8
341 Yes I lost some weight recently, why? 1.4571 0.07798 70 44 20 6
342 My insurance agent said I needed more coverage. 1.4561 0.08328 57 35 18 4
343 Making Umbrellas great again. 1.4561 0.09389 57 38 12 7
344 Do I know you? 1.4561 0.09389 57 38 12 7
345 I've maxed out my cloud storage. 1.4559 0.07679 68 42 21 5
346 Also, it's easy to find and I've never left it in a restaurant. 1.4545 0.08535 55 34 17 4
347 I bought this umbrella before I joined Jenny Craig. 1.4545 0.08921 55 35 15 5
348 You should see my rubbers. 1.4545 0.08413 66 43 16 7
349 Honey, could you check outside and see if it's still raining? 1.4528 0.07884 53 31 20 2
350 No need, it'll be charged directly to your credit card. And thanks for using Umber. 1.4516 0.08810 62 41 14 7
351 I can't talk to you. I'm undercover. 1.4516 0.08505 62 40 16 6
352 Thanks for agreeing to meet me discretely. 1.4516 0.08810 62 41 14 7
353 Does this umbrella makes my ass look big? 1.4516 0.08810 62 41 14 7
354 "It's called 'The Donald'". 1.4516 0.08810 62 41 14 7
355 And it's difficult to lose. 1.4507 0.07449 71 44 22 5
356 The raincoat is just for show. 1.4500 0.08034 60 37 19 4
357 Our agent recommended $1 million additional umbrella coverage. I shopped around and found this for just $49. 1.4500 0.08709 60 39 15 6
358 Ironically enough, I also own the world's smallest violin. 1.4500 0.08709 60 39 15 6
359 No, it does not make you look fat. 1.4500 0.09028 60 40 13 7
360 I was late and grabbed it off the patio. 1.4500 0.09335 60 41 11 8
361 Should a strong wind appear, know how much I love you. 1.4500 0.08709 60 39 15 6
362 Yes, I'm in Risk Management. How'd you know? 1.4500 0.07675 60 36 21 3
363 Sometimes it closes unexpectedly. 1.4490 0.09698 49 32 12 5
364 I work for an umbrella organization. 1.4483 0.09581 58 40 10 8
365 I'm hoping I won't leave this one on the bus. 1.4483 0.08581 58 37 16 5
366 What's "manspreading"? 1.4483 0.08581 58 37 16 5
367 It was crowd sourced. 1.4483 0.07845 58 35 20 3
368 Why yes, the salesman was jolly and green. 1.4483 0.07845 58 35 20 3
369 I've had bad luck opening this indoors. 1.4464 0.08798 56 36 15 5
370 Oh no, a puddle. 1.4464 0.08798 56 36 15 5
371 I wish my HMO had this kind of coverage. 1.4464 0.08421 56 35 17 4
372 You can never have too much coverage. 1.4464 0.09159 56 37 13 6
373 It feels strange to be out without the kids. 1.4464 0.08421 56 35 17 4
374 Now that all the kids have left maybe we should rethink this old umbrella. 1.4464 0.08798 56 36 15 5
375 Christo had a yard sale. 1.4464 0.09843 56 39 9 8
376 I bet you are now wondering what else is in my trench coat. 1.4464 0.08798 56 36 15 5
377 My briefcase converts to a canoe if necessary. 1.4464 0.08798 56 36 15 5
378 I got it before I went on Biggest Loser 1.4464 0.08421 56 35 17 4
379 Now that the kids have left home, I think we should downsize. 1.4464 0.08798 56 36 15 5
380 I hope you gave the coat check girl a generous tip! 1.4464 0.08798 56 36 15 5
381 You know what they say about men with small umbrellas. 1.4464 0.09159 56 37 13 6
382 it's the old GOP model. Everyone was supposed to fit under it, but I guess we're it. 1.4464 0.08798 56 36 15 5
383 Well, I have lost a lot of weight... 1.4462 0.08501 65 43 15 7
384 We should have kids. 1.4444 0.09408 54 36 12 6
385 The people at my bus stop love it. 1.4444 0.08219 54 33 18 3
386 And this is why you don't shop online while taking Ambien. 1.4444 0.09029 54 35 14 5
387 We're gonna need a bigger cab. 1.4444 0.09029 54 35 14 5
388 You should see my condoms. 1.4444 0.09029 54 35 14 5
389 You're a lot skinnier than my last girlfriend. 1.4444 0.09029 54 35 14 5
390 Water makes it grow. 1.4444 0.08219 54 33 18 3
391 They talked me into premium coverage 1.4444 0.08634 54 34 16 4
392 They call it 'The Trumpbrella'. 1.4444 0.09408 54 36 12 6
393 Oh yes, you can judge a man by the size of his umbrella. 1.4444 0.09029 54 35 14 5
394 What do you mean I am overprotective? 1.4444 0.09824 45 29 12 4
395 In the insurance game we feel there is no such thing as too much coverage. 1.4444 0.09296 45 28 14 3
396 Apparently a maximum coverage umbrella policy isn't what I thought it was. 1.4426 0.08273 61 39 17 5
397 Do we really need this much coverage? 1.4426 0.08273 61 39 17 5
398 I'm starting up a drysharing service. 1.4423 0.09278 52 34 13 5
399 It came with my 500 year flood insurance. 1.4423 0.09278 52 34 13 5
400 I'm claustrophobic 1.4407 0.08807 59 39 14 6
401 I don't think we should generalize but it's true for umbrellas. 1.4407 0.08807 59 39 14 6
402 If I had known it was going to rain this hard I would have brought the big one. 1.4407 0.08116 59 37 18 4
403 I know it's large, but I don't know if it's annoying enough 1.4407 0.09133 59 40 12 7
404 For the last time, it doesn’t make you look fat. 1.4407 0.09133 59 40 12 7
405 I am working undercover this week. 1.4407 0.09133 59 40 12 7
406 If the wind catches it I'll just meet you in New Jersey. 1.4407 0.08116 59 37 18 4
407 It takes a village to raise this thing. 1.4407 0.08807 59 39 14 6
408 Are you waiting for Godot as well? 1.4407 0.08807 59 39 14 6
409 Huh? You've been telling me that size matters for the last 27 years...! 1.4407 0.09447 59 41 10 8
410 You think my mother was over-protective? 1.4407 0.08116 59 37 18 4
411 I tend to overcompensate. 1.4400 0.11125 50 37 4 9
412 I used to have more friends. 1.4400 0.08162 50 30 18 2
413 I'm allergic to cats and dogs. 1.4394 0.08398 66 44 15 7
414 If we'd gotten wet, we'd have shrunk even more. 1.4386 0.10018 57 41 7 9
415 "Fifteen kids on the next school bus are mine". 1.4386 0.08677 57 37 15 5
416 After I come up with another $49,900 I can get the hot dog cart to go with it. 1.4386 0.08677 57 37 15 5
417 I can still sing in the rain, but dancing is out of the question. 1.4386 0.07923 57 35 19 3
418 I've been told I have a tendency to overcompensate. 1.4386 0.09372 57 39 11 7
419 It's not going to rain on my parade. 1.4386 0.09700 57 40 9 8
420 I'm not laying my coat down. You're just going to have to walk around the puddle. 1.4386 0.08309 57 36 17 4
421 Thank you for choosing Uber Umbrella. 1.4386 0.09031 57 38 13 6
422 ``Yes, I moved here from Seattle. How'd you know?'' 1.4386 0.08309 57 36 17 4
423 Hold this for a minute, please. I want to step outside to see if the rain has stopped. 1.4386 0.07923 57 35 19 3
424 It was only twenty cents more. 1.4386 0.08677 57 37 15 5
425 I sublet it on week ends through Airbnb. 1.4386 0.09372 57 39 11 7
426 Christo estate sale. 1.4386 0.09372 57 39 11 7
427 It may be too big to fail, but it takes a village to raise it. 1.4386 0.09700 57 40 9 8
428 I thought plain black was the most unobtrusive. 1.4386 0.08309 57 36 17 4
429 I bought a thirty year subscription to Time. 1.4386 0.09372 57 39 11 7
430 I guess I didn't need my raincoat after all. 1.4386 0.07923 57 35 19 3
431 No, actually I think it makes you look thinner. 1.4386 0.09031 57 38 13 6
432 We're lucky you ordered the Mai Tai 1.4386 0.08677 57 37 15 5
433 It isn't bad luck to open indoors, it's impossible. 1.4386 0.08677 57 37 15 5
434 Try not to crowd me. 1.4375 0.10274 48 33 9 6
435 It's meant for Americans. 1.4375 0.10697 48 34 7 7
436 I get a buck apiece at the bus stop. 1.4364 0.09627 55 38 10 7
437 Did you request an Uber-ella? 1.4364 0.09271 55 37 12 6
438 My insurance coverage has a large umbrella policy. 1.4364 0.08514 55 35 16 4
439 If the wind is right, it takes 15 minutes off my commute 1.4364 0.06749 55 31 24 0
440 I'm hosting a flash crowd in 6 minutes. 1.4364 0.08514 55 35 16 4
441 Yes — the gastric bypass went great, thanks. 1.4364 0.08900 55 36 14 5
442 I allowed for shrinkage. 1.4364 0.09971 55 39 8 8
443 Of course it's HUGE. It's a TRUMPbrella! 1.4364 0.09971 55 39 8 8
444 Compensating? Whose compensating? 1.4364 0.09627 55 38 10 7
445 What? We never use the patio. 1.4364 0.08900 55 36 14 5
446 I can walk you to the subway, if you don't mind picking up a pre-school class on the way. 1.4364 0.08900 55 36 14 5
447 '' Bought it at the Trump Tower store.'' 1.4364 0.09271 55 37 12 6
448 What makes you think that I am compensating for something else? 1.4355 0.07839 62 39 19 4
449 I borrowed it from Donald Trump. 1.4340 0.09901 53 37 9 7
450 I have personal space issues. 1.4340 0.07382 53 31 21 1
451 You should see the guy who lent this to me. 1.4333 0.08690 60 40 14 6
452 Is this your first Airbnb? 1.4333 0.08359 60 39 16 5
453 You must be very careful where you click when you order online. 1.4328 0.07436 67 42 21 4
454 No one ever mistakes it for theirs. 1.4314 0.07004 51 29 22 0
455 You should see my poncho. 1.4314 0.08968 51 33 14 4
456 I lost over 500 pounds. How did you know? 1.4314 0.08968 51 33 14 4
457 It was my cousin's. He passed it on to me after he won The Biggest Loser! 1.4314 0.08520 51 32 16 3
458 I assumed more people were coming. 1.4314 0.09395 51 34 12 5
459 It seems to make all my problems seem smaller.... 1.4310 0.09561 58 41 9 8
460 Marge thinks we should list it on Airbnb. 1.4310 0.09561 58 41 9 8
461 It covers my ego. 1.4310 0.09240 58 40 11 7
462 You walk ahead, I'll catch up. 1.4308 0.08483 65 44 14 7
463 Don't worry, we're covered. 1.4306 0.08114 72 49 15 8
464 Its 100 years bad luck if you open it indoors. 1.4286 0.08775 56 37 14 5
465 It's for the cats and dogs. 1.4286 0.08396 56 36 16 4
466 It also covers auto. 1.4286 0.09137 56 38 12 6
467 For only a small additional investment I got a lot more coverage. 1.4286 0.09137 56 38 12 6
468 My arm is killing me. 1.4286 0.09822 56 40 8 8
469 They're calling for widely scattered showers. 1.4286 0.09137 56 38 12 6
470 I won the Biggest Loser last year. 1.4286 0.08775 56 37 14 5
471 I'm overcompensating for small galoshes. 1.4286 0.07584 56 34 20 2
472 I'm under cover. 1.4286 0.08396 56 36 16 4
473 I miss the rain. 1.4286 0.09137 56 38 12 6
474 We've got a lot of ground to cover. 1.4286 0.09221 49 32 13 4
475 You should've seen the Mai Tai it came in. 1.4286 0.08775 56 37 14 5
476 Sometimes I need my space and other people’s space. 1.4286 0.08396 56 36 16 4
477 It's a real crowd pleaser. 1.4286 0.08775 56 37 14 5
478 i've been told size matters 1.4286 0.08000 56 35 18 3
479 You should see my cocktails 1.4286 0.08396 56 36 16 4
480 The ad promised full coverage for my car. I thought I was buying insurance. 1.4259 0.09004 54 36 13 5
481 As a matter of fact I do shop at Costco, why ? 1.4259 0.09749 54 38 9 7
482 I've recently lost quite a bit of weight. 1.4259 0.08607 54 35 15 4
483 It's from the Donald Trump line of umbrellas. 1.4259 0.09384 54 37 11 6
484 Its from the Trump Travel collection. 1.4259 0.09384 54 37 11 6
485 That was one hell of a cocktail. 1.4259 0.08607 54 35 15 4
486 When you turn it upside down it becomes an ark. 1.4259 0.09384 54 37 11 6
487 Noah called. 1.4259 0.08607 54 35 15 4
488 Take that, El Nino. 1.4259 0.09004 54 36 13 5
489 My uncle went to Texas and all I got was this stupid umbrella 1.4259 0.08607 54 35 15 4
490 Not easy to pack, for sure, but on rainy days I make a lot of new friends. 1.4259 0.08191 54 34 17 3
491 What makes you think I'm a Trump supporter? 1.4259 0.09384 54 37 11 6
492 I'm suddenly in the mood for a really humongous Mai Tai. 1.4237 0.08785 59 40 13 6
493 I heard the middle class had shrunk, but this is ridiculous. 1.4237 0.08785 59 40 13 6
494 Can you believe someone just left it by the pool? 1.4231 0.09250 52 35 12 5
495 No, your ass does not look big under this umbrella. 1.4231 0.08395 52 33 16 3
496 The best part is he threw in the leather interior and Bluetooth for almost nothing. 1.4231 0.09649 52 36 10 6
497 I thought you'd be bigger. 1.4231 0.08395 52 33 16 3
498 It's actually bigger than my apartment. 1.4231 0.09250 52 35 12 5
499 Most people are put off by my dry sense of humor. 1.4231 0.09649 52 36 10 6
500 It's much harder to lose 1.4231 0.09250 52 35 12 5
501 "Welcome to UMBER ma'am, It's .75 cents for the first city block, $1.50 for each additional city block. 1.4231 0.07934 52 32 18 2
502 So, it turns out I may not have fully understood the umbrella policy my broker sold me. 1.4231 0.08395 52 33 16 3
503 I'm allowing for shrinkage. 1.4231 0.08395 52 33 16 3
504 They're predicting wide-spread storms today. 1.4231 0.08833 52 34 14 4
505 Wide spread showers? 1.4231 0.08833 52 34 14 4
506 I'm extremely unpopular at football games 1.4231 0.08395 52 33 16 3
507 I may have small hands, but I can guarantee you, there's nothing wrong with the size of my umbrella. 1.4231 0.10032 52 37 8 7
508 When the wind catches it, you should let go. 1.4222 0.09790 45 30 11 4
509 The forecast said cloudy with a chance of tsunami. 1.4211 0.09348 57 40 10 7
510 I also have a hot dog cart on the weekend. 1.4211 0.06822 76 48 24 4
511 Don't worry. I think we're covered. 1.4211 0.08282 57 37 16 4
512 Worst case scenario, we turn it upside-down 1.4211 0.08282 57 37 16 4
513 Actually, I was kicked out of the scouts for being too prepared. 1.4200 0.09515 50 34 11 5
514 Overcompensating? What are you suggesting? 1.4200 0.07608 50 30 19 1
515 Our umbrella policy definitely has us covered. 1.4200 0.08127 50 31 17 2
516 My grandfather was president of Morton Salt. 1.4194 0.08771 62 43 12 7
517 It works great against Google maps and drones too! 1.4186 0.10645 43 30 8 5
518 You should see the cocktail 1.4182 0.08873 55 37 13 5
519 Technically, this was listed as a one bedroom. 1.4182 0.08873 55 37 13 5
520 Excuse me, you're invading my personal space. 1.4182 0.08873 55 37 13 5
521 It came with the drink. 1.4182 0.09244 55 38 11 6
522 Yes, I have lost weight. 1.4182 0.07197 55 33 21 1
523 I bought it at a giant yard sale. 1.4182 0.09602 55 39 9 7
524 ...But by the time I got up the beanstalk, all the good stuff was taken. 1.4182 0.08873 55 37 13 5
525 Climate change. I'm ready. 1.4182 0.08873 55 37 13 5
526 Why, yes, I do work in insurance! 1.4182 0.08078 55 35 17 3
527 And I got another one for just a small shipping and handling charge. 1.4182 0.08873 55 37 13 5
528 I didn't even know Trump had a line of umbrellas.. 1.4182 0.08485 55 36 15 4
529 This is bigger than both of us. 1.4182 0.09602 55 39 9 7
530 I have some personal space issues. 1.4182 0.09244 55 38 11 6
531 He sold me the extended coverage policy. 1.4182 0.07197 55 33 21 1
532 Want to see what happens when I close it? 1.4182 0.08485 55 36 15 4
533 Does it make my hands look small? 1.4182 0.08485 55 36 15 4
534 If the country club wanted it to stay over the patio table, they wouldn't have put a handle on it. 1.4167 0.09800 48 33 10 5
535 Yes, I was on the Biggest Loser. Why do you ask? 1.4167 0.10242 48 34 8 6
536 I'm a big believer in climate change. 1.4167 0.09337 48 32 12 4
537 I thought Triple X umbrella meant something else when I ordered it. 1.4167 0.08333 48 30 16 2
538 This Uberella service hasn't quite taken off yet. 1.4167 0.08849 48 31 14 3
539 I'm compensating for something. I'm just not sure what. 1.4167 0.10242 48 34 8 6
540 If you bring it indoors, you'll get 3000 years of bad luck 1.4167 0.08849 48 31 14 3
541 Hi, I'm Noah. Do you have any pets? 1.4167 0.09337 48 32 12 4
542 Where are all the other people we invited to the shower? 1.4151 0.09499 53 37 10 6
543 I love Costco 1.4151 0.09499 53 37 10 6
544 I usually have a larger tour group. 1.4151 0.08274 53 34 16 3
545 Mind the puddle. 1.4151 0.09109 53 36 12 5
546 I lost my regular umbrella so I just took the one from the patio 1.4151 0.09499 53 37 10 6
547 I always purchase the extended coverage! 1.4151 0.09499 53 37 10 6
548 I've been told that I have a very dry sense of humor. 1.4151 0.07345 53 32 20 1
549 It was a dollar more than the regular size, and it came with a soda. 1.4151 0.08702 53 35 14 4
550 I'm only saying that there is, perhaps, room for more in our relationship. 1.4151 0.09109 53 36 12 5
551 I got it on sale at Costco. 1.4151 0.08702 53 35 14 4
552 Omaha?!? Last thing I remember was being in Seattle and the wind started to blow. 1.4151 0.09499 53 37 10 6
553 It's a Trumpbrella...you know, large and unwieldy, and only useful about 10% of the time. 1.4151 0.09499 53 37 10 6
554 Excuse me miss. I can't help but notice that you are also 3 inches tall. 1.4151 0.09874 53 38 8 7
555 Never buy an umbrella policy from Costco . 1.4151 0.09499 53 37 10 6
556 It's all this Purple Rain talk... it has me terrified. 1.4151 0.09109 53 36 12 5
557 Would you like to see my penis? 1.4146 0.12085 41 31 3 7
558 I'm leaving you for Mary Poppins. 1.4130 0.09619 46 31 11 4
559 See all those pigeons? 1.4130 0.10109 46 32 9 5
560 I said get it on Amazon, not for the Amazon. 1.4130 0.09619 46 31 11 4
561 Unless I'm mistaken it was you said "make sure you bring enough protection." 1.4118 0.08008 51 32 17 2
562 What do you mean I'm risk adverse ? 1.4118 0.08934 51 34 13 4
563 That diet really worked! 1.4118 0.09363 51 35 11 5
564 It's simple really. This is my apartment. 1.4118 0.09772 51 36 9 6
565 I promised the guy at the hot dog stand that I’d bring it back tomorrow. 1.4118 0.08008 51 32 17 2
566 What they don't tell you when you buy it is that if you close it, you get crushed to death. 1.4118 0.09363 51 35 11 5
567 The next step in the plan is to get Mexico to pay for it. 1.4118 0.09363 51 35 11 5
568 You should've seen the size of the hotdogs. 1.4118 0.09772 51 36 9 6
569 Me? Overprotective? 1.4118 0.09363 51 35 11 5
570 It's an Uberbrella. Where can I walk you? 1.4118 0.09363 51 35 11 5
571 I'm just coming out of a polygamous relationship. 1.4118 0.08484 51 33 15 3
572 It's also a WiFi hotspot. 1.4118 0.08484 51 33 15 3
573 I shop at Costco. 1.4103 0.10847 39 27 8 4
574 The best part is, everyone gets out of your way. 1.4091 0.09377 44 29 12 3
575 I don't give a damn about the other pedestrians, I'm a libertarian. 1.4091 0.09377 44 29 12 3
576 Now let's go take some eyes out! 1.4091 0.09925 44 30 10 4
577 The six-man was the same price as the four-man, so I decided to go for it. 1.4082 0.08708 49 32 14 3
578 No, what do they say about guys with big umbrellas? 1.4082 0.09636 49 34 10 5
579 I opted for full Umbrella Coverage with our policy. 1.4082 0.09184 49 33 12 4
580 And you said size doesn't matter. 1.4082 0.09184 49 33 12 4
581 My insurance broker recommended a large umbrella policy. 1.4082 0.10067 49 35 8 6
582 They're only sold during the El Niño years. 1.4082 0.09636 49 34 10 5
583 Climate change. 1.4082 0.10481 49 36 6 7
584 Can you hold this while I check the weather. 1.4082 0.09184 49 33 12 4
585 new account at the bank, it was this or a 50 slice toaster 1.4082 0.09184 49 33 12 4
586 I'm from Texas. 1.4082 0.09636 49 34 10 5
587 I've tried every other way to make friends. 1.4082 0.07670 49 30 18 1
588 It said "One Size Fits All." 1.4082 0.09184 49 33 12 4
589 I've lost weight. 1.4082 0.09184 49 33 12 4
590 They said "my level didn't qualify for a golden parachute" 1.4082 0.09636 49 34 10 5
591 I used to be much heavier. 1.4082 0.08708 49 32 14 3
592 They were out of large. 1.4082 0.09184 49 33 12 4
593 I'm getting a head of the curve on climate change. 1.4082 0.08206 49 31 16 2
594 New York City pigeons are YUUGE! 1.4082 0.08708 49 32 14 3
595 It has to be this big, I'm almost 50 pounds heavier than Mary Poppins. 1.4082 0.09184 49 33 12 4
596 I stole it from Trump Towers. 1.4082 0.08206 49 31 16 2
597 It was made in Texas. 1.4074 0.08156 54 35 16 3
598 Are you kidding, you expect me to put my coat down over that puddle for you? 1.4074 0.08573 54 36 14 4
599 I heard it was going to rain cats and dogs. 1.4074 0.08972 54 37 12 5
600 I forgot my hat. 1.4074 0.09353 54 38 10 6
601 Cristo will never miss it. 1.4074 0.08573 54 36 14 4
602 I was expecting others to join us. 1.4043 0.08950 47 31 13 3
603 Wouldn't it be easier to just move to Southern California? 1.4043 0.09453 47 32 11 4
604 You look a lot thinner than your profile picture. 1.4043 0.10386 47 34 7 6
605 Tell me Martha: why are our 'wants' so much bigger than our 'needs'"? 1.4043 0.09930 47 33 9 5
606 My therapist says I need to stop being so sheltered. 1.4043 0.07849 47 29 17 1
607 You've upgraded our umbrella policy? 1.4043 0.09453 47 32 11 4
608 Here's why: I've never once left this in a restaurant. 1.4043 0.08950 47 31 13 3
609 "Some days when the wind picks up, I can fly to work. 1.4043 0.08418 47 30 15 2
610 It was on sale in the big and tall section. 1.4038 0.08357 52 34 15 3
611 I got it on a corner from a guy named Noah. 1.4038 0.09215 52 36 11 5
612 I know it looks silly, but I don't want to hurt my mother's feelings. 1.4038 0.08796 52 35 13 4
613 Yes, only child 1.4038 0.08796 52 35 13 4
614 I'm the designated dryer. 1.4038 0.08357 52 34 15 3
615 I'm not sure if people like me or they just want to get out of the rain 1.4038 0.07399 52 32 19 1
616 Cabs can be a problem...... 1.4038 0.07892 52 33 17 2
617 A strong wind will be cheaper than a cab. 1.4038 0.08796 52 35 13 4
618 Way faster than the elevator, right? 1.4038 0.08796 52 35 13 4
619 It matches my ego. 1.4038 0.07892 52 33 17 2
620 Got it off e-bay from some old lady living in a shoe. 1.4038 0.09215 52 36 11 5
621 They said it was going to rain cats and dogs. 1.4038 0.10000 52 38 7 7
622 The weatherman said widespread rain. 1.4038 0.09215 52 36 11 5
623 This IS our increased coverage. 1.4035 0.08249 57 38 15 4
624 Wanna see my Rubbers? 1.4000 0.09476 50 35 10 5
625 It's the Trump Ego model 1.4000 0.08449 55 37 14 4
626 You should see the size of the chocolates they left on my pillow 1.4000 0.08571 50 33 14 3
627 I come from a large Catholic family. 1.4000 0.09476 50 35 10 5
628 I invited a few friends to join us. 1.4000 0.08646 45 29 14 2
629 This is not an umbrella. This is revenge against the double stroller. 1.4000 0.08838 55 38 12 5
630 Size matters. 1.4000 0.09744 45 31 10 4
631 It's reversible in case of flood. 1.4000 0.08571 50 33 14 3
632 I'm aggressively risk averse 1.4000 0.08646 45 29 14 2
633 Sure, I get tired some times -- but at least the rent is manageable. 1.4000 0.09211 55 39 10 6
634 I've always been over protective. 1.4000 0.09035 50 34 12 4
635 Trump says it's all about protecting the hair. 1.4000 0.09744 45 31 10 4
636 It's from the Trump Collection. 1.4000 0.09211 45 30 12 3
637 I want a big family. 1.4000 0.08571 50 33 14 3
638 It's my new Trumpbrella. 1.4000 0.10249 45 32 8 5
639 They come three to a pack at Costco. 1.4000 0.08081 50 32 16 2
640 This umbrella is the second biggest thing I've held in my hands today. 1.4000 0.09476 50 35 10 5
641 I grew up in a large family in Seattle. 1.4000 0.09476 50 35 10 5
642 I guess I could sell advertising space. 1.4000 0.09035 50 34 12 4
643 It's great. Caught a breeze yesterday from Columbus Circle to Murray Hill. 1.4000 0.09035 50 34 12 4
644 Well, you know what they say about guys with big umbrellas! 1.4000 0.09744 45 31 10 4
645 It's one of the few perks that comes with managing an umbrella fund. 1.4000 0.09476 50 35 10 5
646 It all started when my third grade teacher asked if I'd brought enough gum for everyone. 1.4000 0.09035 50 34 12 4
647 Just in case, it's also a boat. 1.4000 0.10249 45 32 8 5
648 "The Compensator" is the biggest model on the market. 1.4000 0.09476 50 35 10 5
649 I thought you said you were bringing some friends. 1.4000 0.08571 50 33 14 3
650 I'm telling you, that gastric bypass was a real life-saver. 1.4000 0.09897 50 36 8 6
651 ''But, do you like Pina Coladas ? "" 1.4000 0.09476 50 35 10 5
652 It's the global warming model. 1.4000 0.08081 50 32 16 2
653 Why, yes...I 'am' from Texas. How did you guess? 1.4000 0.08081 50 32 16 2
654 Welcome to Seattle! 1.4000 0.09211 45 30 12 3
655 I find a golf umbrella just doesn't cause enough inconvenience to other people. 1.4000 0.08571 50 33 14 3
656 Get anything else at the Duggar family garage sale? 1.4000 0.10249 45 32 8 5
657 Overprotective and dry sense of humor, you say? 1.4000 0.09897 50 36 8 6
658 If you'll hold my umbrella, I'll lay my raincoat over the puddle for you. 1.4000 0.09476 50 35 10 5
659 I lost a few pounds. 1.4000 0.09035 50 34 12 4
660 Yes, I'm compensating. 1.4000 0.12910 25 17 6 2
661 I have a thing about really big birds. 1.4000 0.08571 50 33 14 3
662 Another one of his failed enterprises...Trump Umbrellas. 1.4000 0.11209 40 29 6 5
663 It was my first time going to a big box store. 1.4000 0.09897 50 36 8 6
664 Now that the kids are out of college, I think we should downsize. 1.4000 0.09035 50 34 12 4
665 I found it at the bottom of a beanstalk. 1.4000 0.08081 50 32 16 2
666 Actually, I'm an under-cover agent. 1.4000 0.08646 45 29 14 2
667 I don't understand why some people think I'm overly protective 1.4000 0.09744 45 31 10 4
668 It also comes in large. 1.4000 0.08571 50 33 14 3
669 One drop and I get my money back. 1.4000 0.08571 50 33 14 3
670 This is the best coverage we've ever had! 1.4000 0.09897 50 36 8 6
671 It's in case of climate change. 1.4000 0.09744 45 31 10 4
672 We've reached the limits of my umbrella policy. 1.3966 0.07354 58 37 19 2
673 Remind me to return this umbrella to Trump Tower. 1.3962 0.08233 53 35 15 3
674 It's days like this when I miss my old entourage. 1.3962 0.09071 53 37 11 5
675 It's from Costco. 1.3962 0.08662 53 36 13 4
676 I weigh a bit more than Mary Poppins. 1.3958 0.09292 48 33 11 4
677 Yeah, I manspread, too. 1.3958 0.09292 48 33 11 4
678 ' Is this your first trip with Uberella?' 1.3958 0.09758 48 34 9 5
679 Please, don't buy me any more Viagra promo umbrellas. 1.3958 0.11037 48 37 3 8
680 Your from Texas, right? 1.3958 0.08802 48 32 13 3
681 I've lost a little weight. 1.3958 0.08802 48 32 13 3
682 He's making umbrellas great again. 1.3958 0.09292 48 33 11 4
683 Alright, if you think there's room for you. 1.3958 0.08802 48 32 13 3
684 This way, you won't have to stand so close. 1.3958 0.09292 48 33 11 4
685 You said size matters. 1.3958 0.08802 48 32 13 3
686 I'm not waiting for a bus. I'm waiting for a stiff wind. 1.3958 0.09292 48 33 11 4
687 It was a thank you gift from a crowd funding site. 1.3958 0.09292 48 33 11 4
688 Would you like to eat outside? 1.3958 0.08802 48 32 13 3
689 This briefcase is ridiculously heavy. 1.3958 0.10627 48 36 5 7
690 Do you want to come upstairs and see my rain boots? 1.3958 0.09758 48 34 9 5
691 It doesn't fit in a cab, so I have to walk everywhere. 1.3958 0.09292 48 33 11 4
692 I upgraded my umbrella policy to cover you. 1.3958 0.08802 48 32 13 3
693 It keeps you very dry but your arm will never be the same. 1.3958 0.08802 48 32 13 3
694 They're ptedicting widely scattered showers. 1.3958 0.09292 48 33 11 4
695 Sure. You SAID 'Size doesn't matter' but... 1.3953 0.10060 43 30 9 4
696 If I knew we'd be sharing I would've brought the BIG umbrella. 1.3953 0.08892 43 28 13 2
697 It also covers my home, auto and excess liability. 1.3922 0.09321 51 36 10 5
698 As your agent, I can assure you that you can never have too much coverage 1.3922 0.08438 51 34 14 3
699 Yes, I do consider myself a socialist. 1.3922 0.09321 51 36 10 5
700 I bought it from a very large British nanny. 1.3922 0.08438 51 34 14 3
701 I'm just happy to see you. 1.3922 0.09733 51 37 8 6
702 I'm trying to meet more people. 1.3922 0.08438 51 34 14 3
703 Yes, I'd like to have a big family. How'd you know? 1.3922 0.09321 51 36 10 5
704 Yeah, maybe it's overkill, but it fits my dry sense of humor. 1.3913 0.09051 46 31 12 3
705 Well, I had saved quite a bit for a rainy day 1.3913 0.08500 46 30 14 2
706 It's the smallest they had at COSTCO 1.3913 0.09051 46 31 12 3
707 It has a large margin of error. 1.3913 0.10531 46 34 6 6
708 It came in my daiquiri. 1.3913 0.09051 46 31 12 3
709 I think our agent sold us too much coverage. 1.3913 0.09570 46 32 10 4
710 It was produced through crowd-sourcing. 1.3913 0.09051 46 31 12 3
711 They were out of golden parachutes. 1.3913 0.09570 46 32 10 4
712 I used to let a smile be my umbrella, then my meds failed. 1.3913 0.08500 46 30 14 2
713 And if it really gets bad, you can flip it over and it's a boat. 1.3913 0.09051 46 31 12 3
714 When it's windy, you can get a bird's eye view of the city. 1.3913 0.10062 46 33 8 5
715 Made in Texas 1.3913 0.09570 46 32 10 4
716 Go figure, it expands in water. 1.3913 0.08500 46 30 14 2
717 Tracing my genealogy back to Noah was transformative. 1.3913 0.09570 46 32 10 4
718 You should see my golden parachute. 1.3913 0.10062 46 33 8 5
719 Hold the umbrella, while I spread my coat over the puddle . 1.3913 0.08500 46 30 14 2
720 What do you mean, you feel like I am over-compensating? 1.3902 0.10405 41 29 8 4
721 I call it my über-ella. 1.3902 0.09802 41 28 10 3
722 I've got you covered. 1.3889 0.08112 54 36 15 3
723 I'm working under cover. 1.3889 0.08112 54 36 15 3
724 This is an umbrella cartoon. It's above your head. 1.3889 0.08932 54 38 11 5
725 Ever since the kids moved out, this umbrella feels so empty. 1.3878 0.09136 49 34 11 4
726 A 10-year subscription to the New Yorker has its benefits. 1.3878 0.09590 49 35 9 5
727 I saved a lot for a rainy day. 1.3878 0.08153 49 32 15 2
728 It's mostly for my ego. 1.3878 0.08153 49 32 15 2
729 It can rain on my parade, your parade and two of your friends. 1.3878 0.08658 49 33 13 3
730 I accidentally opened it in the apartment this morning. That's like, what, a million years bad luck? 1.3878 0.08153 49 32 15 2
731 Just download the app called "Uber-brella." 1.3878 0.09136 49 34 11 4
732 Bought it at Costco. 1.3878 0.09590 49 35 9 5
733 I'm from Texas, ma'am. 1.3878 0.08658 49 33 13 3
734 On Wall Street you get a lot of jumpers. 1.3878 0.09590 49 35 9 5
735 Ok, but if we don’t make some friends, I’m out of ideas. 1.3878 0.09590 49 35 9 5
736 My chivalry ends here. 1.3878 0.09136 49 34 11 4
737 Not impressed? Just wait until the wind blows. 1.3878 0.09590 49 35 9 5
738 I found it among the Christie for President discards. 1.3878 0.09590 49 35 9 5
739 The guy in the store said it would shrink in the rain. 1.3878 0.08658 49 33 13 3
740 You see, you have got to account for shrinkage! 1.3878 0.08658 49 33 13 3
741 I'm getting $50 a day on Airbnb 1.3878 0.09136 49 34 11 4
742 too much? 1.3878 0.08153 49 32 15 2
743 It was more impressive when it was a metaphor. 1.3878 0.09136 49 34 11 4
744 I've already misplaced two of them this year. 1.3878 0.08658 49 33 13 3
745 Thanks, it's a Trumprella. 1.3878 0.09136 49 34 11 4
746 Flag the first taxi you see with a ski rack. 1.3878 0.09136 49 34 11 4
747 The black umbrella is nice, but the golden parachute would have been better. 1.3878 0.08658 49 33 13 3
748 It's got nothing to do with rain. I just like my space. 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
749 That WAS an umbrella in my pocket, but I'm still happy to see you. 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
750 I combined my auto and home insurance and my agent sent me this 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
751 "Want to come up to my place? I make a monster daiquiri. 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
752 It's not you, it's me. 1.3864 0.10889 44 33 5 6
753 Well, do you want to sing anyway? 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
754 I can guarantee you the best coverage in the business. 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
755 The Joneses got a new what? 1.3864 0.10392 44 32 7 5
756 Do you like Pina Coladas? 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
757 Welcome to Texas. 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
758 I got it from the old Republican Party. 1.3864 0.10392 44 32 7 5
759 On a windy day it's faster than a taxi. 1.3860 0.07818 57 38 16 3
760 When do you want to meet my kids? 1.3860 0.08940 57 41 10 6
761 It's the next big thing — excessorization. 1.3846 0.08751 52 36 12 4
762 I also use it to float down from the 37th floor. 1.3846 0.08309 52 35 14 3
763 I bought into the El Nino hype... 1.3846 0.08309 52 35 14 3
764 She got the big house with the big deck, I got the big deck umbrella. 1.3846 0.10138 39 27 9 3
765 It's 50 cents per block -- maximum 12 walkers. 1.3833 0.07551 60 40 17 3
766 Our insurance agent said we needed a lot more umbrella coverage. 1.3830 0.09401 47 33 10 4
767 They call it a trumpbella. 1.3830 0.09881 47 34 8 5
768 Going inside seems rather wasteful, doesn't it? 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
769 I also prefer the term "little people." 1.3830 0.09881 47 34 8 5
770 My agent tells me it's the best coverage money can buy. 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
771 Share a taxi? 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
772 I regret a lot of things, Margaret. This umbrella is not one of them. 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
773 This way we can be dry and obnoxious 1.3830 0.08359 47 31 14 2
774 I heard Donald Trump has a small umbrella to make his hands look bigger. 1.3830 0.09881 47 34 8 5
775 I bought it from the Poppins estate. 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
776 Is this as big as it gets? 1.3830 0.09881 47 34 8 5
777 I though you said that you needed some space... 1.3830 0.09401 47 33 10 4
778 So that loud mouth from Texas probably has our umbrella! 1.3830 0.09881 47 34 8 5
779 No it's not subway friendly. 1.3830 0.08359 47 31 14 2
780 I'm preparing for the fallout from November's election. 1.3830 0.08359 47 31 14 2
781 I've lost a lot of weight. 1.3830 0.07167 47 29 18 0
782 I no longer worry about my umbrella being stolen. 1.3830 0.09401 47 33 10 4
783 You know what they say about men with big umbrellas, don't you? 1.3830 0.10338 47 35 6 6
784 My agent said that I needed extra coverage. 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
785 I bought it at the big umbrella sale. 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
786 The forecast made it sound a lot worse. 1.3830 0.08359 47 31 14 2
787 It's a republican thing, big umbrella but we don't want just anyone underneath it. 1.3830 0.09401 47 33 10 4
788 It was in my briefcase. Why do you ask? 1.3830 0.10338 47 35 6 6
789 They forecast widespread rain. 1.3830 0.09401 47 33 10 4
790 You said to increase the coverage of our umbrella policy. 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
791 I'm staying at the Trump Plaza and they provide huuuuuge umbrellas. 1.3830 0.09401 47 33 10 4
792 It's great until the wind blows....... 1.3830 0.08359 47 31 14 2
793 This isn't our bed...you have plenty of room over there. 1.3830 0.09401 47 33 10 4
794 It's called a Trumbrella. It's a tremendous umbrella. Yuge, in fact. 1.3830 0.09401 47 33 10 4
795 I'm sheltering us from the tears of failed Caption Contest entrants. It's a whole thing, now. 1.3830 0.09881 47 34 8 5
796 I think I got Trumps umbrella. 1.3830 0.09401 47 33 10 4
797 This was a lot more fun on the beach... 1.3830 0.08359 47 31 14 2
798 We didn't use it on the patio much anyway so... 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
799 Actually I am a weather forecaster. 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
800 What do you mean this umbrella isn't big enough for both of us? 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
801 We should have invited more people. 1.3830 0.08895 47 32 12 3
802 It was only 200 dollars more and I get five times the coverage. 1.3824 0.09455 34 22 11 1
803 You're invading my personal space. 1.3810 0.10751 42 31 6 5
804 I got it in black because I didn't want to be all "look-at-me". 1.3810 0.09611 42 29 10 3
805 I told the insurance salesman I needed a policy to cover the whole family! 1.3810 0.08986 42 28 12 2
806 I think you'll find that most things about me are grandiose and overblown. 1.3810 0.10197 42 30 8 4
807 Stop looking at me! I'm undercover... 1.3810 0.09611 42 29 10 3
808 Thanks for helping me to get it up. 1.3800 0.08025 50 33 15 2
809 I am ready for the dogs and cats 1.3800 0.08519 50 34 13 3
810 My wife had big hair. 1.3800 0.08985 50 35 11 4
811 I bought in when it went co-op in the '80's. 1.3800 0.08985 50 35 11 4
812 The neighbors are gone for a week, so I just borrowed it from their patio set. 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
813 I have something really big to share with you. 1.3778 0.07970 45 29 15 1
814 I bought it before my participation in "The biggest loser" 1.3778 0.09686 45 32 9 4
815 My insurance agent suggested That I increase my umbrella coverage. 1.3778 0.09686 45 32 9 4
816 The kickstarter campaign made it sound like a technological wonder. 1.3778 0.08581 45 30 13 2
817 I think my insurance guy misunderstood when I told him I wanted the largest umbrella coverage they had. 1.3778 0.09686 45 32 9 4
818 It came with my drink at happy hour. 1.3778 0.10195 45 33 7 5
819 Please don't think me unchivalrous, but perhaps we could just walk around it. 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
820 I got it for drinking the world's biggest Mai Tai. 1.3778 0.09686 45 32 9 4
821 I'v never concerned about rain......wind yes. 1.3778 0.09686 45 32 9 4
822 No, I don't mind sharing the umbrella. 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
823 I'm from Seattle. 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
824 Why do you always say that! I'm not overcompensating for anything. 1.3778 0.10195 45 33 7 5
825 Now no one can rain on my parade! 1.3778 0.08581 45 30 13 2
826 One size fits all. 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
827 I grew up in Texas 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
828 Because the Canada geese are migrating north this month. 1.3778 0.08581 45 30 13 2
829 I didn't buy it. It came in my daiquiri. 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
830 No, I think galoshes would a been a bit much 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
831 This "Uberella Pool" will be picking up two more people. 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
832 I told you I switched insurance. 1.3778 0.09686 45 32 9 4
833 Why can't you hold it for a while? 1.3778 0.10195 45 33 7 5
834 Yes, a Costco did just open in my neighborhood. Why to you ask? 1.3778 0.09686 45 32 9 4
835 Ma'am, please, get your own. 1.3770 0.07811 61 42 15 4
836 I heard the forecast is for extended showers. 1.3750 0.08744 48 33 12 3
837 Yes, this might have been a challenge for Gene Kelly. 1.3750 0.09237 48 34 10 4
838 I specialize in conversation pieces. 1.3750 0.08744 48 33 12 3
839 The Big & Tall men's shop. Why? 1.3750 0.09928 40 28 9 3
840 Well, it isn't the golden parachute I was hoping for. 1.3750 0.08744 48 33 12 3
841 Why, yes, these are new shoes. Why'd you ask? 1.3750 0.09237 48 34 10 4
842 My therapist thought it'd be a good way to meet people. 1.3750 0.09705 48 35 8 5
843 I was a winner on 'The Biggest Loser.' 1.3750 0.08665 56 40 11 5
844 Great in the rain,hell in the wind. 1.3750 0.08539 40 26 13 1
845 Why do you think I have a large ego? 1.3725 0.08839 51 36 11 4
846 It's great for avenues, but cross streets are going to be a problem. 1.3725 0.08383 51 35 13 3
847 If it gets windy I may not be here for you. 1.3721 0.09426 43 30 10 3
848 It was only $25 at Costco. 1.3721 0.10536 43 32 6 5
849 Enough gust we may beat the bus. 1.3721 0.09996 43 31 8 4
850 Yes, as a matter of fact, my penis is rather small. 1.3721 0.09996 43 31 8 4
851 Why yes, my gastric bypass operation was a great success. 1.3714 0.09245 35 23 11 1
852 Mary Poppins can kiss my ass. 1.3714 0.11657 35 26 5 4
853 You said it was going to rain cats and dogs 1.3704 0.08482 54 38 12 4
854 I’d walk you to my house, but this IS my house. 1.3704 0.07614 54 36 16 2
855 I thought more people would come... 1.3704 0.08060 54 37 14 3
856 I was always forgetting my old umbrella. 1.3696 0.08432 46 31 13 2
857 I got it with the large martini at lunch. 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
858 It was the free gift that came with the Hummer. 1.3696 0.10004 46 34 7 5
859 You should see my galoshes. 1.3696 0.08432 46 31 13 2
860 It's a metaphor. 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
861 They called it too big to flail. 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
862 They gave me this instead of a golden parachute. 1.3696 0.07838 46 30 15 1
863 What? You know I love to shop at Costco. 1.3696 0.10004 46 34 7 5
864 why would we need to get a room? 1.3696 0.08432 46 31 13 2
865 Are we paying too much for our umbrella policy? 1.3696 0.10004 46 34 7 5
866 Don't laugh, if there's a flash flood, it doubles as a life boat 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
867 I've always wanted a large family. 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
868 RNC garage sale. 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
869 They were on sale at Costco. 1.3696 0.10004 46 34 7 5
870 Can you believe I got kicked out of the ball game? 1.3696 0.08432 46 31 13 2
871 Well, when you shop on the internet, it's really hard to tell scale. 1.3696 0.09509 46 33 9 4
872 It has its down side when it's windy! 1.3696 0.09509 46 33 9 4
873 I think you will find our umbrella policy will cover all your needs. 1.3696 0.07838 46 30 15 1
874 It's the only one I've found that'll keep me AND my ego dry. 1.3696 0.08432 46 31 13 2
875 I guess the rest of the team couldn't make it? 1.3696 0.07838 46 30 15 1
876 Yes, I have a picnic table in my briefcase. 1.3696 0.10004 46 34 7 5
877 Hopefully the wind doesn't pick up, or else we may have to file a flight plan. 1.3696 0.08432 46 31 13 2
878 Honey, you really shouldn't buy everything at Costco 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
879 It's great unless it get windy. 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
880 My therapist thinks that I have a tendency to overcompensate.. 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
881 So you're a minimalist? 1.3696 0.09509 46 33 9 4
882 Perfect for the cloud. 1.3696 0.10004 46 34 7 5
883 That cab driver didn't even slow down. 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
884 I bought it at a h-u-u-g-g-e-e Trump hotel gift shop. 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
885 You should see my golf umbrella. 1.3696 0.09509 46 33 9 4
886 It was crowd funded. 1.3696 0.09509 46 33 9 4
887 Isn't this the mid-life crisis you would want me to have? 1.3684 0.08537 57 41 11 5
888 If I close it up, we may never be found again. 1.3684 0.08781 38 25 12 1
889 Yup. Got it at Trump's Yard Sale. It used to shelter his ego. 1.3684 0.11576 38 29 4 5
890 I'm an aquaphobic claustrophobic too. 1.3684 0.10274 38 27 8 3
891 If the wind kicks up, I'll show you my impression of Mary Poppins. 1.3684 0.10274 38 27 8 3
892 I'm in insurance...I like to walk the talk on coverage. 1.3684 0.08781 38 25 12 1
893 I may have misinterpreted a retirement commercial. 1.3673 0.08089 49 33 14 2
894 And in case of a flood, it doubles as a life raft. 1.3673 0.08598 49 34 12 3
895 My insurance agent assured me that we have full coverage. 1.3673 0.08089 49 33 14 2
896 Step aside please, you're crowding me. 1.3673 0.08598 49 34 12 3
897 No I am not compensating for something. 1.3659 0.09726 41 29 9 3
898 I guess we should have had the discussion about having children before I bought the umbrella. 1.3659 0.09726 41 29 9 3
899 Does it look like I'm compensating? 1.3659 0.10334 41 30 7 4
900 I don't think hailing a cab is such a great idea, lets just walk. 1.3636 0.08658 44 30 12 2
901 It's the best.. as long as there's no wind 1.3636 0.09248 44 31 10 3
902 Just wait until you see the wall we're going to build. 1.3636 0.12168 33 25 4 4
903 Isn't Costco wonderful? 1.3636 0.08658 44 30 12 2
904 It's not mine. I borrowed it from Donald Trump. 1.3636 0.10828 44 34 4 6
905 You should see my golf bag. 1.3636 0.10328 44 33 6 5
906 Well yes, I do sell insurance. 1.3636 0.09248 44 31 10 3
907 There's a really big cloud following me 1.3636 0.08024 44 29 14 1
908 I've got a lot of friends. 1.3636 0.09248 44 31 10 3
909 You should have seen the glass it was in! 1.3636 0.09248 44 31 10 3
910 It's called the Portobello model. 1.3636 0.09803 44 32 8 4
911 I'm hydro-intolerant. 1.3636 0.08658 44 30 12 2
912 Just taking the necessary precautions so you won't melt...like your sister. 1.3636 0.11364 33 24 6 3
913 That puddle looks ominous. 1.3636 0.09248 44 31 10 3
914 Don't tell the hot dog vendor that I have it. 1.3636 0.09803 44 32 8 4
915 The hardest part is closing it before you get into a taxi. 1.3636 0.09248 44 31 10 3
916 Closing it is a bit tricky. 1.3636 0.09803 44 32 8 4
917 There's room for everyone. I call it the Bernie-Brella. 1.3636 0.08024 44 29 14 1
918 It was a gift from my bank deemed "to big to fail". 1.3636 0.09803 44 32 8 4
919 I found it next to the bean stalk in the back yard. 1.3636 0.10328 44 33 6 5
920 Our policies provide complete coverage 1.3636 0.08024 44 29 14 1
921 The new diet is really working. 1.3636 0.09248 44 31 10 3
922 SkyMall. 1.3636 0.08658 44 30 12 2
923 The irony is I'm with State Farm. 1.3636 0.08658 44 30 12 2
924 Usually, it's a crowd pleaser 1.3636 0.09248 44 31 10 3
925 This romantic walk in the rain was well worth the arm cramp. 1.3617 0.08288 47 32 13 2
926 Shall we ask a few friends under this evening? 1.3617 0.08828 47 33 11 3
927 It's time to downsize. 1.3617 0.09821 47 35 7 5
928 I'm thinking of installing gutters. 1.3617 0.09338 47 34 9 4
929 Do you think my insurance agent sold me too much umbrella coverage? 1.3617 0.08828 47 33 11 3
930 It belonged to Donald Trump, 1.3617 0.09821 47 35 7 5
931 I'm in insurance. 1.3617 0.09338 47 34 9 4
932 Well, yes I am voting for Trump. How did you know? 1.3611 0.10655 36 26 7 3
933 I picked it up at a Texas Costco. 1.3611 0.09882 36 25 9 2
934 I like to think of myself as a very inclusive guy with room for everybody. 1.3611 0.10655 36 26 7 3
935 Why yes, I do work in insurance... How did you guess? 1.3600 0.07959 50 34 14 2
936 Being lead counsel for Luigi's Hot Dogs has its perks. 1.3600 0.08926 50 36 10 4
937 May I have a moment to discuss your family's comprehensive coverage? 1.3590 0.10702 39 29 6 4
938 It also protects against asteroids. 1.3590 0.10702 39 29 6 4
939 It came from the Big and Tall Man's Shop 1.3590 0.10052 39 28 8 3
940 Coverage means a lot to me. I guess that's why I'm in insurance. 1.3590 0.10052 39 28 8 3
941 You know, In case of cats and dogs. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
942 I bought it before I joined the Biggest Loser. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
943 Wanna hear my rendition of 'Singing In The Rain'? The acoustics are fabulous! 1.3585 0.08973 53 39 9 5
944 It didn't look so big when I bought it at Costco. 1.3571 0.09531 42 30 9 3
945 We're collecting Karen, Jean, Dan, Skip, Gil and Lois on the way. 1.3571 0.08223 42 28 13 1
946 After taking it out of this carrying case I never could figure out how to refold the darn thing. 1.3571 0.08901 42 29 11 2
947 If it gets windy, we can sail home. 1.3571 0.09531 42 30 9 3
948 My umbrella plan will provide you the broad coverage you seek. 1.3571 0.08901 42 29 11 2
949 I bought it in Seattle 1.3571 0.10122 42 31 7 4
950 Is it too much? 1.3571 0.10122 42 31 7 4
951 Why do you take me for a pessimist ? 1.3571 0.09531 42 30 9 3
952 I'm hoping to have a family one day. 1.3571 0.08223 42 28 13 1
953 You know what they say about the size of a man’s umbrella. 1.3571 0.08223 42 28 13 1
954 You go ahead. I'll cover for you. 1.3571 0.08223 42 28 13 1
955 It looked smaller in the package. 1.3571 0.10680 42 32 5 5
956 Couldn't take a chance. Wearing my blue suede shoes. 1.3571 0.08223 42 28 13 1
957 Upside down, it makes a pretty decent life raft if we get any flooding. 1.3571 0.10122 42 31 7 4
958 I also use it to parachute down from my apartment. 1.3571 0.08901 42 29 11 2
959 Wait until you see the swizzle stick. 1.3571 0.10122 42 31 7 4
960 Do you remember where we parked the ark? 1.3571 0.08901 42 29 11 2
961 It's my new umbrella policy - extra coverage. 1.3571 0.08901 42 29 11 2
962 Have you heard the extended forecast? 1.3571 0.09531 42 30 9 3
963 I thought we would have a family by now. 1.3571 0.08223 42 28 13 1
964 It's family size; I got it at Costco. 1.3571 0.09531 42 30 9 3
965 No, I have never opened it inside. 1.3571 0.09531 42 30 9 3
966 It's called the El Niño. 1.3571 0.10122 42 31 7 4
967 So, what do you think of my haircut? 1.3571 0.09531 42 30 9 3
968 It even comes with a sunroof for when it's nice out. 1.3571 0.10122 42 31 7 4
969 I figured it's a good investment in global climate change. 1.3556 0.08502 45 31 12 2
970 What do we do!! Step over it or walk through it?? 1.3556 0.10128 45 34 6 5
971 My therapist says I need to appear more "welcoming." 1.3556 0.09076 45 32 10 3
972 See, our umbrella insurance policy covers you no matter what. 1.3556 0.08502 45 31 12 2
973 You can't go wrong with a large umbrella policy. 1.3556 0.09076 45 32 10 3
974 Yes, Congress finally put aside their differences and passed Umbrellacare. 1.3556 0.09617 45 33 8 4
975 Got eight kids. Why do you ask? 1.3556 0.09076 45 32 10 3
976 It was free, but with ads inside. 1.3556 0.08502 45 31 12 2
977 It's the climate change version 1.3556 0.09617 45 33 8 4
978 It's an umbrella umbrella -- it covers everything. 1.3556 0.09076 45 32 10 3
979 Our company is cutting expenses. They took away my company car and gave me this. 1.3556 0.09076 45 32 10 3
980 I ran valet parking at the Republican debates. 1.3556 0.10615 45 35 4 6
981 The is just one of the kinds of polices I can offer you 1.3556 0.09076 45 32 10 3
982 I got it from Costco. 1.3556 0.10615 45 35 4 6
983 It was Republican party surplus. 1.3556 0.09617 45 33 8 4
984 I'm expanding my social network. 1.3556 0.11081 45 36 2 7
985 He said, "Let's make umbrellas great again,' and I just stopped thinking 1.3556 0.09076 45 32 10 3
986 You looked a lot bigger in your profile picture... 1.3556 0.08502 45 31 12 2
987 No one else could pull it from the stand, so it seems I'm the rightful King of Seattle. 1.3556 0.09076 45 32 10 3
988 I just came down from the 60th floor. 1.3556 0.08502 45 31 12 2
989 Well, yes. The wind can be problematic. 1.3556 0.07216 45 29 16 0
990 I took the job because of the big umbrella policy they offered! 1.3556 0.09076 45 32 10 3
991 My entourage used to be much larger. 1.3542 0.08675 48 34 11 3
992 It was made to cover Trumps ego. 1.3542 0.08675 48 34 11 3
993 Protects against cats and dogs. 1.3529 0.11076 34 25 6 3
994 It's the Uber model and we'll be picking up three passengers on the walk to the office. 1.3529 0.08319 34 22 12 0
995 Don't mind the rain, if the wind picks up we'll be home in 5 minutes! 1.3529 0.11076 34 25 6 3
996 Excuse me, umbrellas are really only for one person. 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
997 I'm banned from Al's Mirror Shop for 77 years. 1.3514 0.11107 37 28 5 4
998 Instead of saving for a rainy day, I bought huge umbrella. 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
999 I should have been more skeptical when a room with a corner view was only $75 on Airbnb. 1.3514 0.07957 37 24 13 0
1000 Is this enough space for you? 1.3514 0.08850 37 25 11 1
1001 It shrinks when it gets wet 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
1002 The salesman's name was Noah something or other. 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
1003 A gift from my insurance company. 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
1004 It's called the "Donald Trump Model. 1.3500 0.10470 40 30 6 4
1005 It's called the rainbrero. 1.3500 0.08174 60 44 11 5
1006 You didn't know there was a choral arrangement of 'Singin' in the Rain'? 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
1007 It's for when my carpool decides to walk. 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
1008 Tell me again why we needed to wear rain coats? 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
1009 Just don't open it indoors. 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
1010 It's from before my gastric bypass surgery. 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
1011 The web ad said giant umbrella sale... I didnt think it meant the umbrella! 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
1012 Wonder what my 10 kids are up to back in Seattle? 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
1013 Who knew CostCo sells umbrellas? 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
1014 It's a Trumpbrella and it's awesome. 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
1015 I bought this umbrella when I was a lot fatter. 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
1016 I got it in the Trump gift shop. 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
1017 I’m overcompensating. 1.3500 0.07638 40 26 14 0
1018 It's a Trump umbrella, huge, huge. 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
1019 I bought it at the polygamy store. 1.3500 0.08435 40 27 12 1
1020 I found it in a Big and Tall Men's Shop 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
1021 I call it an 'uberella'. 1.3500 0.10470 40 30 6 4
1022 I just had lunch with Donald Trump, and we accidentally swapped umbrellas. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1023 Why yes, I used to be much heavier before we met. How did you know? 1.3488 0.09919 43 32 7 4
1024 It's not really the umbrella, is it? 1.3488 0.09919 43 32 7 4
1025 I got it at Macy's in the Overkill department. 1.3488 0.10462 43 33 5 5
1026 What do you mean, 'Am I overcompensating for something?' 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1027 Trumpella 1.3488 0.10979 43 34 3 6
1028 I wonder why no taxi would pick us up. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1029 When they said the were having a humongous sale, I thought they were talking about the price 1.3488 0.10979 43 34 3 6
1030 I'm from California...I'm not used to the water. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1031 It's also useful when the elevator's broken. 1.3488 0.08072 43 29 13 1
1032 They were all out of the big ones. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1033 Technology says the cloud is getting bigger. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1034 The image on line did not look like this 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1035 I told you we would love London 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1036 Don't worry. I once kept a small village in Bangladesh dry for a week. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1037 I bought it before I lost weight. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1038 The larger one didn't come in black. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1039 Although I have to keep the brief case filled with rocks ...in case of wind gusts. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1040 But do we need to make umbrellas great again? 1.3488 0.09919 43 32 7 4
1041 Now it's your turn to hold it. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1042 It folds up into a Tesla. 1.3488 0.09919 43 32 7 4
1043 I always imagined I'd have kids by now. 1.3488 0.08072 43 29 13 1
1044 "They're predicting cats and dogs by this afternoon. 1.3488 0.09919 43 32 7 4
1045 If the wind comes up I can fly to work. 1.3488 0.08072 43 29 13 1
1046 You really have to watch out for the updrafts. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1047 It was really quite reasonable. Where they get you is $400 custom-made stand. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1048 I feel responsible for too many people. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1049 Rain? No...just waiting for the wind to take me to the sixth floor. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1050 My financial adviser suggested increasing my coverage. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1051 It's a real chick magnet. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1052 They were out of my size. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1053 I think we're covered. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1054 I work for a crowdsourcing company. 1.3488 0.09919 43 32 7 4
1055 It used to belong to Donald Trump, but he wanted a bigger one. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1056 If the wind picks up, grab on to my legs. 1.3488 0.08731 43 30 11 2
1057 Wait 'til you see my rubbers. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1058 Don't even start with me, April. 1.3488 0.09919 43 32 7 4
1059 My agent says you can never have enough coverage. 1.3488 0.08072 43 29 13 1
1060 I bought it on a recent trip to Texas. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
1061 I believe in climate revenge. 1.3478 0.08910 46 33 10 3
1062 How did you know I'm from Texas. 1.3478 0.08910 46 33 10 3
1063 "Well, truth be told I hate galoshes". 1.3478 0.09437 46 34 8 4
1064 The salesman had me at Mary Poppins. 1.3478 0.08351 46 32 12 2
1065 Size does matter. 1.3478 0.10411 46 36 4 6
1066 So far, so good. Ready to try it in midtown? 1.3438 0.09640 32 22 9 1
1067 So that's why it says one size fits all. 1.3429 0.09994 35 25 8 2
1068 I've never felt more under the weather. 1.3429 0.09114 35 24 10 1
1069 Do you have to buy everything at the bulk stores? 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
1070 Hey baby! Do you like men with big umbrellas? 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
1071 Yeah, nothing is big enough for you 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
1072 I want my ego to stay dry. 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
1073 I used to have a bigger head. 1.3429 0.09114 35 24 10 1
1074 I come from a big family. 1.3429 0.09994 35 25 8 2
1075 I can't help it, I'm from Texas. 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
1076 Our extensive umbrella coverage is finally paying off. 1.3429 0.11554 35 27 4 4
1077 You can share it but there's a five dollar cover charge. 1.3421 0.09449 38 27 9 2
1078 It's for when we have a family. 1.3421 0.09449 38 27 9 2
1079 Not only that, but it's wifi hotspot 1.3421 0.08663 38 26 11 1
1080 Before he lost weight, it belonged to Governor Christie. 1.3421 0.10174 38 28 7 3
1081 I wouldn't go without umbrella coverage. 1.3421 0.10174 38 28 7 3
1082 I had the Trump logo removed. 1.3421 0.10174 38 28 7 3
1083 "This is the new line of Ego umbrellas introduced by Donald Trump". 1.3421 0.09449 38 27 9 2
1084 At least I'm not texting. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1085 When I turn it upside down, it acts as an ark. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1086 That will be $2 please. 1.3415 0.09633 41 30 8 3
1087 No, I don't know who Dr. Freud is. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1088 This is nothing. Wait til you see the galoshes I ordered. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1089 The air rights were extra. 1.3415 0.10247 41 31 6 4
1090 It's 7 generations of bad luck if you open this one indoors. 1.3415 0.09633 41 30 8 3
1091 It's a Trump umbrella, of course. 1.3415 0.10247 41 31 6 4
1092 It's a bitch to fold. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1093 Look, I just want to keep us both nice and dry--I'm not trying to compensate for anything. 1.3415 0.09633 41 30 8 3
1094 I told you I worked for a large umbrella company. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1095 Our staff meets here, and then we all go to lunch together. 1.3415 0.09633 41 30 8 3
1096 It's called the pessimist's model. 1.3415 0.07498 41 27 14 0
1097 Overcompensating how? 1.3415 0.10247 41 31 6 4
1098 As we get older we need more coverage 1.3415 0.10247 41 31 6 4
1099 So, salary and compensation aren't the same? 1.3415 0.09633 41 30 8 3
1100 It's bigger than my apartment. 1.3415 0.08271 41 28 12 1
1101 What makes you think I'm a socialist? 1.3415 0.10247 41 31 6 4
1102 It cost me my entire rainy day fund. 1.3415 0.10826 41 32 4 5
1103 "Cloudy with a chance of go f#@* yourself!" said Mr Trump. 1.3415 0.10826 41 32 4 5
1104 Just ten more people then we can go. 1.3415 0.08271 41 28 12 1
1105 It was on sale at Big Lots. 1.3415 0.09633 41 30 8 3
1106 No, size really does matter. 1.3415 0.09633 41 30 8 3
1107 Oh my! We forgot to take the kids! 1.3415 0.09633 41 30 8 3
1108 It's from the gift shop at Trump Towers. 1.3415 0.09633 41 30 8 3
1109 I'm thinking about getting an entourage. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1110 As we have promised: you would get full coverage. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1111 Great for those scattered showers... 1.3415 0.10247 41 31 6 4
1112 With that kind of budget, this is the best real estate you'll get in the city 1.3415 0.10247 41 31 6 4
1113 My therapist says I overcompensate. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1114 It's fine, as long as there is no wind. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1115 Well you made me sell the SUV. 1.3415 0.10247 41 31 6 4
1116 It's my 25th anniversary gift from Travelers. 1.3415 0.08271 41 28 12 1
1117 The umbrella is by Noah manufacturing. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1118 My shrink said that I should try to be more accommodating. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
1119 It's a great deal, one size fits all. 1.3409 0.08567 44 31 11 2
1120 My insurance guy said I needed more Umbrella Coverage!" 1.3409 0.09163 44 32 9 3
1121 They said it is a bad case of "Mary Poppins Syndrome." 1.3409 0.09163 44 32 9 3
1122 So, I was at Costco yesterday... 1.3409 0.09723 44 33 7 4
1123 A guy with big hands needs a big umbrella. 1.3409 0.09163 44 32 9 3
1124 It is my golf umbrella - for a foursome. 1.3409 0.09163 44 32 9 3
1125 My umbrella crowdfunding campaign did a lot better than I expected. 1.3409 0.08567 44 31 11 2
1126 We need to cover more ground. 1.3409 0.09723 44 33 7 4
1127 Can't be too prepared for climate change! 1.3409 0.08567 44 31 11 2
1128 Donald's ego should fit under here. 1.3409 0.09723 44 33 7 4
1129 We also make Big Ass Fans 1.3409 0.09163 44 32 9 3
1130 When they said 'Couple's Umbrella' they must have been referring to divorced couples. 1.3409 0.09723 44 33 7 4
1131 Sorry, they said you were rather large. 1.3409 0.09163 44 32 9 3
1132 I only have 2 more payments of $19.99. 1.3409 0.09163 44 32 9 3
1133 '"It will never rain on our parade." 1.3409 0.09163 44 32 9 3
1134 I should've brought the big one. 1.3409 0.09163 44 32 9 3
1135 My daughter got married under this last August 1.3409 0.09163 44 32 9 3
1136 And if there's an El Niño, it can double as an ark. 1.3409 0.09723 44 33 7 4
1137 It came free with my Costco membership. 1.3409 0.10252 44 34 5 5
1138 I wondered why my patio umbrella seemed so tiny. 1.3400 0.08857 50 37 9 4
1139 I got it right after Superstorm Sandy. 1.3400 0.08857 50 37 9 4
1140 They canceled my life insurance policy and gave me this. 1.3333 0.10675 27 19 7 1
1141 The forecast called for cats and dogs. 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
1142 The worst is when it has stopped raining by the time you get it up. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
1143 I don't mean to invade your space. 1.3333 0.10033 42 32 6 4
1144 It gets interesting when the wind blows. 1.3333 0.10033 42 32 6 4
1145 Really? You think I'm overcompensating? 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
1146 We can finally afford an umbrella policy. 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
1147 I've been saving up for this day for years. 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
1148 It's the only model on the market that guarantees bad luck if you open it indoors. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
1149 I also got term, whole life and accidental death and dismemberment coverage. 1.3333 0.08707 51 38 9 4
1150 If the wind picks up, look for me about seven blocks west of here. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1151 I've always been told that size doesn't matter! 1.3333 0.10033 42 32 6 4
1152 If the wind picks up, hold on to my arm. 1.3333 0.08113 42 29 12 1
1153 In case of flooding, it can be used as a boat. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1154 I've got this one covered. 1.3333 0.09245 39 28 9 2
1155 Hi I'm new in town, just moved here from Seattle. Want to get a cup of coffee? 1.3333 0.08113 42 29 12 1
1156 I told you I bought a Costco membership. 1.3333 0.10033 42 32 6 4
1157 I have 12 kids. 1.3333 0.08799 42 30 10 2
1158 It doubles as a tiny house. 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
1159 I used this once in Chicago and ended up in Maine 2 days later. 1.3333 0.09245 39 28 9 2
1160 I can make it home with two strong wind gusts. 1.3333 0.09245 39 28 9 2
1161 It was designed by Brunelleschi after he built the dome. 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
1162 the salesman said "one size fits all" 1.3333 0.09096 48 36 8 4
1163 I can't get the top to go back up on my convertible. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
1164 It's my apres moi, le deluge look. 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
1165 I've got some business across the river, if the wind picks up. 1.3333 0.08799 42 30 10 2
1166 I got a deal on it at a giant estate sale. 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
1167 I'm trying to broaden my social circle. 1.3333 0.08484 39 27 11 1
1168 ...and when summer arrives, we can reattach it to our patio furniture! 1.3333 0.09245 39 28 9 2
1169 I have a very large umbrella policy. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1170 It came with my iPhone 6 plus. 1.3333 0.10033 42 32 6 4
1171 It's also impervious to drone attacks. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
1172 No one likes me on the subway. 1.3333 0.08799 42 30 10 2
1173 If you think this is big, you should see the tiki drink it came with. 1.3333 0.09535 45 34 7 4
1174 I'm obnoxious. 1.3333 0.08799 42 30 10 2
1175 And it doubles as a parachute. 1.3333 0.08484 39 27 11 1
1176 I come from a very large family. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
1177 The insurance guy said this would cover my car, home, life, health and social security. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1178 So this is what they meant by total umbrella coverage. 1.3333 0.07647 39 26 13 0
1179 The forecast said frogs. 1.3333 0.10605 39 30 5 4
1180 My jacket's suede. 1.3333 0.10605 39 30 5 4
1181 I thought it was going to rain cats and dogs. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1182 I own the rain, but I do fear the wind. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1183 You know what they say about men with big umbrellas? 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
1184 No, my hands are big; why do you ask? 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
1185 It's from that failed Mary Poppins reboot starring Andre the Giant 1.3333 0.07968 36 24 12 0
1186 Trump designed it. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
1187 It converts to an ark. 1.3333 0.08909 36 25 10 1
1188 You know what they say about guys with big umbrellas? 1.3333 0.12050 33 26 3 4
1189 Would it surprise you to know that I wear a belt AND suspenders? 1.3333 0.08113 42 29 12 1
1190 I'd like to talk to you about adding umbrella coverage to your existing policy. 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
1191 I'm telling you Bev, umbrella sharing is going to be more popular than ride sharing. 1.3333 0.09245 39 28 9 2
1192 I drive a convertible. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1193 No, Im not compensating for anything. Why do you ask ? 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1194 Are you interested in flood coverage? 1.3333 0.08909 36 25 10 1
1195 I guess we can share the umbrella. 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
1196 This is a bamboo umbrella. When it rains, it grows. 1.3333 0.08799 42 30 10 2
1197 Size matters, you know. 1.3333 0.08799 42 30 10 2
1198 Maybe we overreacted to that El Nino forecast. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1199 You think I could pull a Mary Poppins? 1.3333 0.08113 42 29 12 1
1200 There was a Groupon for it. 1.3333 0.11269 36 28 4 4
1201 MUCH cheaper than renting! 1.3333 0.08909 36 25 10 1
1202 This has nothing to do with my hand size. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1203 No, you're not fat. 1.3333 0.08799 42 30 10 2
1204 "I'm sorry I made the crack about you melting. But, this is getting heavy. 1.3333 0.10033 42 32 6 4
1205 Let's go find a more crowded sidewalk! 1.3333 0.09245 39 28 9 2
1206 I'm saving up for an ark. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1207 Yes, my name is Poppins. How'd you know? 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
1208 If you think this is big you should see what's under my trench coat 1.3333 0.10605 39 30 5 4
1209 It's my latest idea for the sharing economy. 1.3333 0.09436 42 31 8 3
1210 I got it at Costco along with a pallet of toilet paper to take us through 2021. 1.3333 0.09245 39 28 9 2
1211 Oh, just keep walking--I'm not trying to compensate for anything! 1.3333 0.10033 42 32 6 4
1212 It's just that the umbrella is YUGE. My hands aren't small. 1.3333 0.09245 39 28 9 2
1213 You should see the one I use on the beach. 1.3333 0.08989 45 33 9 3
1214 I must've grabbed my entourage umbrella by mistake. 1.3333 0.09245 39 28 9 2
1215 What do you mean my hands are small? 1.3333 0.10033 42 32 6 4
1216 Obviously, I do plan to have a family someday. 1.3333 0.11269 36 28 4 4
1217 You should've seen my ex-wife 1.3333 0.10033 42 32 6 4
1218 Upsold on the downpour! 1.3333 0.08909 36 25 10 1
1219 Do you think I'm being overprotective? 1.3333 0.07647 39 26 13 0
1220 We must look for an SUV cab 1.3333 0.08799 42 30 10 2
1221 Where's yours? 1.3269 0.07631 52 37 13 2
1222 If I ever said "size doesn't matter",..., I apologize. 1.3261 0.09353 46 35 7 4
1223 And this is just my umbrella... 1.3256 0.07960 43 30 12 1
1224 I got it at a yard sale from a political party that doesn't need it any more. 1.3256 0.08627 43 31 10 2
1225 Small hands, big umbrella. 1.3256 0.09247 43 32 8 3
1226 The Supreme Court says it is a penumbra 1.3256 0.08627 43 31 10 2
1227 No worries, it'll soon shrink – it's not waterproof. 1.3256 0.08627 43 31 10 2
1228 I was told to expand my margins 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1229 There's never a rain delay when I'm at the ballpark. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1230 You should see the size of my golf umbrella. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1231 My severerance package included a very generous rainy day coverage. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1232 The full patio set was too large for my apartment. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1233 ''I work for a certain insurance company, It's mandatory.'' 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1234 Sometimes an oversized umbrella is just an oversized umbrella. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1235 It is big, but not the golden parachute I was expecting. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1236 Oh I didn't notice, is it raining? 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1237 Look, this what happens when you send all your manufacturing to China. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1238 Well, you told me to buy one at Costco. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1239 It's the Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious model. 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1240 When rain is predicted, I go big or stay home. 1.3250 0.10370 40 31 5 4
1241 My company is all about group coverage. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1242 I know you think it's a big enough umbrella, but it's always me who ends up getting wet. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1243 I got it before the liposuction. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1244 Not only is it huge, it's gluten free. 1.3250 0.10370 40 31 5 4
1245 Yes, but, on the other hand, I've stopped wearing both belt and suspenders. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1246 It's a brand new model. They call it 'Noah's Revenge'. 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1247 The others will be here soon. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1248 I've always had a big umbrella policy. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1249 This is about the size of our New York apartment. 1.3250 0.10370 40 31 5 4
1250 Want to see my Mary Poppins impression? 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1251 After we get married you decide to tell me?Well, what else about me embarasses you? 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1252 The forecast was for light showers before becoming Biblical rain 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1253 After Sandy, I'm not taking any chances. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1254 It's the smallest IUmbrella guaranteed to keep the IPhone 7 Plus dry. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1255 Squall-proof AND rent-controlled. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1256 If your wallet was only as big as your umbrella 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1257 No thanks for a safe landing? 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1258 Only Mondays get me down anymore. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1259 I have a large family. 1.3250 0.10370 40 31 5 4
1260 Why do you always forget to bring your own? 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1261 My insurance agent recommended more coverage. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1262 It has nothing to do with Trump. 1.3250 0.10370 40 31 5 4
1263 I didn't want to pressure you into standing near me. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1264 My agent recommended more umbrella coverage. 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1265 Want to see the muscle in my left arm? 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1266 Yeah, I splurged a bit using our rainy day fund. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1267 It helps me meet lots of women. 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1268 I'm sorry but the app clearly states that Uber Umbrella XL holds 6-8 people. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1269 However the climate changes, I figure I'm set. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1270 This is nothing. Wait until you see my model railroad collection. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1271 I had to go to Big & Tall. All the other stores were sold out. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1272 Don't ever say I don't have your back. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1273 I think I picked up the wrong umbrella from the restaurant patio. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1274 And this handy case carries the hydraulic opener. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1275 For only $75 more, I doubled my umbrella coverage. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1276 Actually yes, I do work in insurance. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1277 It came with my insurance policy. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1278 I wanted to buy an umbrella policy for my very large family. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1279 Maybe it's me. You try hailing the next cab. 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1280 It’s a Wi-Fi hotspot. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1281 Mormonism has been so lonely since they got rid of polygamy. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1282 If size matters to you, we'll get along just fine. 1.3250 0.10370 40 31 5 4
1283 I thought the contract said "golden parachute." 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1284 I'm the C.E.O. of Travelers. 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1285 Now, suddenly, it's not compensating? 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1286 Great on a rainy day. Somewhat problematic on a rainy windy day. 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1287 Can I interest you in an upgrade on your umbrella policy? 1.3250 0.07500 40 27 13 0
1288 I used to let a smile be my umbrella. This works much better. 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1289 I bought it at Costco. It's one of a three pack. 1.3250 0.08311 40 28 11 1
1290 Well...this Trump umbrella has got to be compensating for something. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1291 They're forecasting widely scattered storms. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1292 Yes Ma'am, I'm from Texas. How did you know? 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1293 Can you believe I found this beauty? On a beach, even! 1.3250 0.09732 40 30 7 3
1294 You should have seen the guy who sold it to me. 1.3250 0.09049 40 29 9 2
1295 That's the last time I'll buy a Chia umbrella. 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1296 The package said it was the "relaxed fit" size. 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1297 Oh don't worry - I got you covered. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
1298 I call it the Jumbrella. 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1299 Yes, Aquaphobia is rare here in Seattle. 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1300 Is it true what they say about umbrellas 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1301 It's always hardest to catch a cab when it's raining. 1.3243 0.10997 37 29 4 4
1302 Don't worry doll - I've got you covered. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1303 'Giant Discount Items' didn't mean what I thought it did. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1304 Is it finally big enough for you? 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1305 On a windy day it'll carry you five blocks. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1306 It came with my Deluxe Umbrella Policy. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1307 I guess my flashmob message was ignored 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1308 The flash mob was today, right? 1.3243 0.10997 37 29 4 4
1309 Once, on a windy day, I ended up on Staten Island. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
1310 It helps me compensate for my tiny raincoat. 1.3243 0.07802 37 25 12 0
1311 Bigger is better than wetter 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1312 I used to be in Group Sales. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1313 I figured we had a sixty percent chance of arguing. 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1314 It's a big enough umbrella but it's always me that ends up getting wet. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1315 It's not quite Uber but I'm in on the ground floor. 1.3243 0.07802 37 25 12 0
1316 I have a meeting uptown. I'm hoping for a big gust. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1317 I do NOT have small hands. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
1318 I moved here very recently following a large gust of wind. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1319 Trump Plaza was having a huge sale. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1320 Its the only thing I could find to cover your ego. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
1321 Unfortunately, it doesn't cover preexisting conditions. 1.3243 0.10997 37 29 4 4
1322 Don't tell me size doesn't matter 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1323 Don't laugh. It beats online dating. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1324 It's great for when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
1325 Trump umbrellas: they're YUUUGE! 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1326 It's been in my family since Goliath. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
1327 It was Al Roker’s before he lost weight. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1328 I'm allergic to both cats and dogs. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
1329 I want to be clear: there is no problem with the size of my hands, or anything else. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
1330 Sting was wrong. 1.3243 0.10997 37 29 4 4
1331 I’m not singing Rihanna—that’s an echo. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
1332 Would you like to see it fold up? 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1333 He didn't say how big the raining cats and dogs would be. 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1334 Overcompensation is what I do. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
1335 I usually date fat women. 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1336 You can stand under my umbrella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella-ella 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1337 I only take baths. 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
1338 It's a walking town; how else will people know how much I make? 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
1339 Does this umbrella make my hand look small 1.3235 0.08144 34 23 11 0
1340 What makes you think I got it in Texas? 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
1341 They call it 'The Donald' model. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
1342 Why yes I am a Democrat, how did you know? 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
1343 My broker suggested I get more coverage under the current climate. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
1344 If I close it, we can do it right here! 1.3235 0.11731 34 27 3 4
1345 What do you mean "compensating"? 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
1346 Unlike our relationship, it's meant to weather all storms. 1.3235 0.11731 34 27 3 4
1347 This improved model lets me poke many, many more people in the eye. 1.3226 0.09713 31 22 8 1
1348 I'm glad I bought the extended coverage. 1.3226 0.09713 31 22 8 1
1349 Mary Poppins could have taken this one to Mars. 1.3226 0.09713 31 22 8 1
1350 I have obsessive-compulsive dryness disorder 1.3191 0.08108 47 34 11 2
1351 They wanted to give me a gold watch, but I held out. 1.3191 0.08108 47 34 11 2
1352 My agent recommended umbrella coverage. 1.3182 0.09630 44 34 6 4
1353 It's the Obamacare model. It covers everybody, but it's awkward and costs a bundle. 1.3182 0.09064 44 33 8 3
1354 It was free with my first purchase of Trump Steaks! 1.3171 0.09525 41 31 7 3
1355 I accidentally tapped 'extra, extra, extra large' on Amazon. 1.3171 0.09525 41 31 7 3
1356 Believe me, it's the fastest way from Penthouse to Street level. 1.3171 0.08144 41 29 11 1
1357 By the way, it is true what they say about a man with a really huge umbrella. 1.3171 0.10145 41 32 5 4
1358 It's really only a problem at ballgames 1.3171 0.08861 41 30 9 2
1359 You misunderstood. Our broker said we needed a larger umbrella policy. 1.3171 0.08144 41 29 11 1
1360 It's from one of Trump's hotels. 1.3171 0.10145 41 32 5 4
1361 And, it's FEMA-approved for shelter in place. 1.3171 0.08144 41 29 11 1
1362 Don't worry. I used the rainy day fund. 1.3171 0.08861 41 30 9 2
1363 Is it still raining? I hadn’t noticed. 1.3171 0.08144 41 29 11 1
1364 The pigeons are angry today! 1.3171 0.08861 41 30 9 2
1365 It's called Uber-ella. You just wait for a stiff wind. 1.3171 0.08861 41 30 9 2
1366 And I figured, it's a really good way to meet new people. 1.3171 0.08144 41 29 11 1
1367 I used to have a lot more hair! 1.3171 0.10145 41 32 5 4
1368 We'll just wait here till that puddle dries. ' 1.3171 0.09525 41 31 7 3
1369 No one rains on my parade. 1.3171 0.09525 41 31 7 3
1370 I have aquaphobia. 1.3171 0.08861 41 30 9 2
1371 overcompensating? 1.3171 0.09525 41 31 7 3
1372 It's actually a yurt I got half off. 1.3171 0.09525 41 31 7 3
1373 I used to live in a rain forest. 1.3171 0.09525 41 31 7 3
1374 It's great, until a big wind comes. 1.3171 0.08144 41 29 11 1
1375 I bought if before my gastric bypass.... 1.3171 0.09525 41 31 7 3
1376 ...and with a strong gust of wind, I don't need the elevator. 1.3158 0.07642 38 26 12 0
1377 I was wet once... 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1378 I bought it at one of those big box stores. 1.3158 0.07642 38 26 12 0
1379 I've never tried folding it. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1380 I used to be REALLY fat. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1381 Mostly I use it with my foursome. 1.3158 0.10738 38 30 4 4
1382 It's the Donald Trump model. 1.3158 0.11381 38 31 2 5
1383 Let’s go take some eyes out. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1384 What?! It cost the same. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1385 How did you know I work for Traveler's Insurance? 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1386 I opted for family coverage. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1387 Be honest, Margot, think the umbrella guy tried to upsell me? 1.3158 0.10738 38 30 4 4
1388 And it's really convenient when I'm out walking the dogs, but on a windy day.... just forget about it. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1389 Are you sure that two of every animal will fit under here? 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1390 At umbrellasforthe1%.com, why? 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1391 I'm not over compensating. 1.3158 0.10738 38 30 4 4
1392 My therapist mentioned something about a 'Noah Complex'. What do you suppose that means? 1.3158 0.07642 38 26 12 0
1393 cats and dogs.. you'll see 1.3158 0.10738 38 30 4 4
1394 Why? Because who would steal it? 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1395 You should have seen the size of his putter. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1396 You're lucky I convinced God we're going to do something about climate change. He wanted me to make it 300 cubits by 50 cubits by 30 cubits. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1397 In heavy winds, it makes me feel like Mary Poppins. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1398 I feel like a piece of patio furniture. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1399 It's a Democratic umbrella. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1400 We need to find a way to decrease our overhead. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1401 If this catches on, we'll need bigger sidewalks. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1402 Yes I am a socialist, how did you know? 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1403 What can go up a chimney down, but not down a chimney up? 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1404 I really increased my commitment to NPR this year. 1.3158 0.10738 38 30 4 4
1405 Do you want to talk about my compensation issues, or do you want to stay dry? 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1406 Did you lose weight? 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1407 The best part is that it fits into my briefcase. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1408 I should tell you right up front that I want a LOT of kids. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1409 Well, this El Niño was a big disappointment 1.3158 0.10738 38 30 4 4
1410 Noah's the name. Staying dry's the game. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1411 'I used to be a big tent person.' 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1412 Sure it's bulky, but it's WiFi-enabled. 1.3158 0.10738 38 30 4 4
1413 Mine is bigger than most men's, but if the rain falls for over four hours, I have to call my doctor. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1414 You've always encouraged me to think big. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1415 Just in case it really is climate change and not weather patterns. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1416 I heard “El Nino” was coming, so I got Mexico to pay for this. The biggest, hugest…” 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1417 I need some space. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1418 It looked a lot smaller in its case. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1419 It's like being in the Cloud. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1420 I make a lot of friends. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1421 I should have bought a new umbrella after the liposuction. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1422 I am a risk management aficionado 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1423 Now that the kids are grown, maybe we should get a smaller umbrella. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1424 Hopefully there's no wind today. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1425 Now that you mention it, I do feel kind of stupid. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1426 "Into every life...?" We'll see about that. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1427 Yes, I sell insurance. Are you covered? 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1428 Why yes! It does cover everything. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1429 Maybe we should downsize, now that the sextuplets are grown. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1430 Why, yes, I did buy it at Costco. 1.3158 0.10738 38 30 4 4
1431 This umbrella coverage was free with our homeowner's policy 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1432 Get ready for take off. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1433 I'm an incurable pessimist. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1434 I told The Travelers I wanted more coverage. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1435 If the wind picks up we won't need that cab. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1436 Damn I forgot my rain boots 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1437 I thought there would be more people going to the Republican convention. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1438 Do you think it's still raining? 1.3158 0.07642 38 26 12 0
1439 I'm calling the concept "UBERella". 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1440 The first downpour is free, then it's a monthly subscription. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1441 It was on sale at the big and tall men's store. 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1442 Do you mind if I share my umbrella? 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1443 It came in one size fits all. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1444 Yes, I have many friends. Why do you ask? 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
1445 You are overcompensating again, dear! 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1446 How about since I brought the umbrella, you ask for directions. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1447 Yes, I have been on Weight Watchers. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1448 I'd like to have a large family. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1449 The Match.com Ad said you were 500 pounds. 1.3158 0.10738 38 30 4 4
1450 I used to caddy for Donald Trump. 1.3158 0.09319 38 28 8 2
1451 What do you mean by over-compensating? 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1452 No, this is all that's left of the Republican big tent. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1453 Speaking softly and carrying a big stick wasn't working. 1.3158 0.07642 38 26 12 0
1454 Scientists think that since Trump clinched the nomination, God just can't stop crying. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1455 It's from my trip to Easter Island. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1456 Oh come on, that restaurant has more than enough. 1.3158 0.10053 38 29 6 3
1457 Yes, you're standing too close. 1.3148 0.07394 54 39 13 2
1458 Want to see my Gene Kelly impression? 1.3143 0.09849 35 26 7 2
1459 The forecast was for a meteor shower. 1.3143 0.09849 35 26 7 2
1460 And it repels drones. 1.3143 0.08955 35 25 9 1
1461 My father was a doorman. He always wanted me to do better than him. 1.3143 0.10668 35 27 5 3
1462 Isn't platinum status great? 1.3143 0.09849 35 26 7 2
1463 I got the extended coverage. 1.3143 0.09849 35 26 7 2
1464 Yeah, they were handing them out at the Trump rally last week. 1.3143 0.09849 35 26 7 2
1465 It came with its own umbrella policy 1.3143 0.08955 35 25 9 1
1466 I'm still getting hit by that sideways rain 1.3143 0.08955 35 25 9 1
1467 That was my biggest drink ever. 1.3143 0.10668 35 27 5 3
1468 I borrowed this from an outdoor restaurant table, and I keep forgetting to return it. 1.3143 0.08955 35 25 9 1
1469 I got it in case Trump wins. 1.3143 0.09849 35 26 7 2
1470 It's a company umbrella. 1.3143 0.08955 35 25 9 1
1471 I am not "compensating." 1.3143 0.09849 35 26 7 2
1472 ...and I save a few bucks at the beach. 1.3143 0.09849 35 26 7 2
1473 My company cut back on the golden parachutes. 1.3143 0.10668 35 27 5 3
1474 I'm going to invoke the 'female privilege' argument. It's your turn to carry this thing. 1.3143 0.10668 35 27 5 3
1475 I'm not overcompensating for that, I swear. 1.3143 0.08955 35 25 9 1
1476 See, I told you that mine was bigger than his. 1.3143 0.10668 35 27 5 3
1477 Well at least you can't tell me I'm all wet now. 1.3125 0.09459 32 23 8 1
1478 It was a giveaway at Starbucks. It's a trenta... 1.3125 0.09459 32 23 8 1
1479 Opening this indoors creates more problems than just bad luck. 1.3125 0.11392 32 25 4 3
1480 I got it as a thank you gift for a crowdfunding contribution. 1.3111 0.07669 45 32 12 1
1481 You know you're right. I think I need to start thinking about downsizing. 1.3103 0.10053 29 21 7 1
1482 My smile just wasn't working anymore. 1.3103 0.10053 29 21 7 1
1483 I bought it in Dallas 1.3095 0.07984 42 30 11 1
1484 Chick magnet. 1.3095 0.09929 42 33 5 4
1485 I'm sure your hair will be just fine. 1.3095 0.07984 42 30 11 1
1486 This is my place. Where's yours? 1.3095 0.08681 42 31 9 2
1487 I'm compensating for having small hands. 1.3095 0.09326 42 32 7 3
1488 I finally found a diet that worked 1.3095 0.08681 42 31 9 2
1489 Turns out I'm a medium after all. 1.3077 0.09113 39 29 8 2
1490 I should have known anything from Trump's Tower would be really big ! 1.3077 0.10490 39 31 4 4
1491 I just moved here from Houston. 1.3077 0.08340 39 28 10 1
1492 I umbrella-pool. If we have at least five walkers under here, we can use the HOV lane on the sidewalk. 1.3077 0.09113 39 29 8 2
1493 I trace my lineage back to Noah. 1.3077 0.08340 39 28 10 1
1494 You're never gonna stop the rain by complaining. 1.3077 0.08340 39 28 10 1
1495 Just making sure my cell phone does not get wet. 1.3077 0.09826 39 30 6 3
1496 You'll change your tune when it starts raining cats and dogs. 1.3077 0.09113 39 29 8 2
1497 It was only $1 more than the regular size. 1.3077 0.08340 39 28 10 1
1498 Expecting company? 1.3077 0.08340 39 28 10 1
1499 They're forecasting "cats and dogs". 1.3077 0.10490 39 31 4 4
1500 No why, does it look like I'm over compensating for something? 1.3077 0.09113 39 29 8 2
1501 Wait till you see the size of the bus I'm waiting for 1.3077 0.09113 39 29 8 2
1502 Would you mind holding the umbrella now? 1.3077 0.08340 39 28 10 1
1503 So I'm clipping my fingernails on the subway and some lady calls me inconsiderate. Can you believe that?! 1.3077 0.10490 39 31 4 4
1504 Want to go to my place and see how big the stand is? 1.3077 0.09826 39 30 6 3
1505 But it was on sale! 1.3077 0.09113 39 29 8 2
1506 I'm expecting a flash mob. 1.3077 0.09826 39 30 6 3
1507 Brookstone Outlet. Why? 1.3077 0.09826 39 30 6 3
1508 Need a ride home? My convertible is parked just across the street. 1.3077 0.09826 39 30 6 3
1509 What can I say, I'm an overachiever. 1.3077 0.07487 39 27 12 0
1510 Hold this while I hail a cab. 1.3077 0.09113 39 29 8 2
1511 It draws a lot of penis jokes. 1.3077 0.08340 39 28 10 1
1512 We also offer term and whole life. 1.3077 0.08340 39 28 10 1
1513 For heaven's sake, I'm only "compensating" for the rain. 1.3077 0.07487 39 27 12 0
1514 Perhaps it's time we downsize now that we're empty-nesters. 1.3061 0.07263 49 35 13 1
1515 Witches shrivel up when they get wet. We can't be too careful, sweetheart. 1.3056 0.10404 36 28 5 3
1516 You knew this would happen when you married an insurance salesman. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1517 It was just a few dollars more for the supersize version. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1518 I like to be as far away from nature as possible. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1519 Well, you said you wanted a big family. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1520 I hope you appreciate the fact that my left arm is experiencing agonizing pain. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1521 I asked for a golden parachute and they handed me this. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1522 No, I don't golf. why do you ask? 1.3056 0.10404 36 28 5 3
1523 Travelers let me go. This is in lieu of a golden parachute. 1.3056 0.10404 36 28 5 3
1524 People seem annoyed with me today. 1.3056 0.10404 36 28 5 3
1525 I call it the Trumpella: for big heads and big hair. 1.3056 0.11832 36 30 1 5
1526 At least when it rains I feel like one of the one percent. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1527 I really didn't think it through. Closing it for example. You'll see what I mean when the bus comes. 1.3056 0.10404 36 28 5 3
1528 At Christo's yard sale, why? 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1529 We may not be high. But we're most definitely dry. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1530 I borrowed it from Mr. Trump. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1531 It's not you. It's me. I just need more space. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1532 The salesman said it was a great way to meet people. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1533 If it's windy, I can fly to work. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1534 I borrowed it from Bromley over at Risk Management. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1535 But, I thought you needed space? 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1536 I was given this umbrella by Donald Trump. 1.3056 0.11141 36 29 3 4
1537 " I told you I do all my work undercover". 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1538 Oh no! We're too late! She's melted! 1.3056 0.11141 36 29 3 4
1539 It will come in handy if we start seeing other people. 1.3056 0.10404 36 28 5 3
1540 It seemed like a good idea at the time. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1541 It's pop culture irony. Just take my word for it. 1.3056 0.10404 36 28 5 3
1542 The name’s 'Poppins.' 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1543 He told me the Trump umbrella was bound to take off. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1544 Just wait until you see my sunglasses. 1.3056 0.10404 36 28 5 3
1545 It's the only thing we can still afford in this neighborhood. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1546 It's not worth a damn in a windstorm… 1.3056 0.11141 36 29 3 4
1547 The insurance company offered a larger umbrella policy, so I bought it. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1548 I got it at Paul Bunyon's garage sale. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1549 I'm a climate change affirmer. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1550 Just ask Hillary. It is a lot easier to talk about a big umbrella than it is to actually get a lot of people under it. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1551 Mary wasn't the only kid in our family with a flying umbrella. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1552 Then I asked myself, what would The Donald do? 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1553 Donald Trump built it 1.3056 0.10404 36 28 5 3
1554 It's from the folks who brought us the Urban Sombrero. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1555 I'm glad it's not windy 1.3056 0.11141 36 29 3 4
1556 It's their cheapest policy. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1557 It's an Armageddon umbrella. You can also use it as a boat and it is bullet proof. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1558 We should go back and get our waders. 1.3056 0.10404 36 28 5 3
1559 It's from my Biggest Loser days. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1560 On a windy day I'm a bit more Mary Poppins and a bit less venture capitalist. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1561 I emptied out the rainy day account. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1562 I figured we could grow into it 1.3056 0.07786 36 25 11 0
1563 Don't ask what I'm overcompensating for. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1564 I'm not hinting at anything! 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1565 I have a generous umbrella policy. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1566 "Who says real men don't carry umbrellas? 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
1567 This is exactly what I was talking about Ethel. No matter what I do , you are never happy. 1.3056 0.09611 36 27 7 2
1568 My job didn't offer a "golden parachute," but their option does have its advantages... 1.3043 0.09810 23 16 7 0
1569 Yeah, Costco sells umbrellas too. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
1570 You should see my snow shovel. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
1571 I thought you had the kids. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
1572 I'm a tour guide. And you? 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
1573 See you tomorrow unless a wind comes up. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
1574 My insurance agent goofed! All I ask for was a simple 'umbrella' policy. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
1575 'Ombrophobia? No. Why? 1.3030 0.11906 33 27 2 4
1576 I decided to do something useful with my rainy day fund. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
1577 Why yes, I am afraid I'll melt. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
1578 You'll have to leave. Uber's got me picking up a party of 50. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
1579 I'm sorry, but there's a six-person minimum for a reservation. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
1580 Okay, so buy the new raincoat already! 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
1581 Size is not everything....but it sure helps. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
1582 It goes with my big hands. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
1583 Marvin Poppins, I'm Mary's nephew. 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
1584 My insurance agent said I need a bigger umbrella. 1.3023 0.07087 43 30 13 0
1585 I thought YOU were bringing the food cart! 1.3023 0.07829 43 31 11 1
1586 I bought it at an Osmond Family yard sale. 1.3000 0.07338 40 28 12 0
1587 It's a little damp and breezy, but at $200,000 you won't find a better apartment in Manhattan. 1.3000 0.08916 40 30 8 2
1588 Well, it was the same price. 1.3000 0.08916 40 30 8 2
1589 They said it was big enough to cover my ego. 1.3000 0.11890 30 24 3 3
1590 Spring break '99... the drinks... were... epic. 1.3000 0.09608 40 31 6 3
1591 Where are the others? 1.3000 0.08916 40 30 8 2
1592 It used to belong to the Republican National Committee. 1.3000 0.08916 40 30 8 2
1593 My shrink says we're suffering from empty nest syndrome. I think we ought to put our umbrella on the market and buy something smaller 1.3000 0.08916 40 30 8 2
1594 Like Bernie, I'm a Socialist. 1.3000 0.11890 30 24 3 3
1595 What's really good about it is that you can't leave it in the back of a cab because it won't fit in the back of a cab! 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
1596 Yeah,I picked up this little baby at the global warming garage sale. 1.3000 0.08916 40 30 8 2
1597 I didn't think it would be just us. 1.3000 0.08165 40 29 10 1
1598 Excuse me... Can we discuss your insurance needs? 1.2979 0.09577 47 38 4 5
1599 This year's model will keep my clubs, golf cart, and caddy dry. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1600 As long as it's not ostentatious. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1601 Obamacare payouts are reduced but they are providing interesting preventive care options! 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1602 I figured I'm never gonna stop the rain by complaining, so... 1.2973 0.07618 37 26 11 0
1603 I'm here for the flash mob. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1604 Would you mind holding this? 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1605 I guess size does matter. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1606 Wall Street was giving them away. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1607 You've heard of 'Big Ass Fans' before, right? 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1608 Maybe we should think about downsizing? 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1609 I bought a large umbrella policy 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1610 I'm aquaphobic 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1611 The others should be here in a few minutes. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1612 I have a huge umbrella. Huge. Believe me. It's huge. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1613 I promise to use protection. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1614 Be warned I'm kind of wild 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1615 Who said size doesn't matter? 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1616 My insurance agent recommended more umbrella coverage. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1617 Under here we have our own zip code. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1618 Attention getting, don't you think? 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1619 I used to have an "Afro". 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1620 Oversized umbrellas are a good racket, but sometimes it feels like there's too much overhead. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1621 It's a really expensive briefcase. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1622 I answered an ad: "Free upgrade for your hand-held portable device". 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1623 Apparently our umbrella policy provided minimal coverage so I splurged. 1.2973 0.07618 37 26 11 0
1624 I'm protecting a $400 perm 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1625 The tag reads... shrinks when wet. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1626 Well Noah would be impressed! 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1627 We need wider sidewalks. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1628 My wife is really fat. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1629 Let's hope they were right about no wind too. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1630 I'm glad the wind is not blowing. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1631 Until now, it also functioned to delineate my personal space. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1632 I always use protection. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1633 I dabble in Polygamy. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1634 Overcompensating for something, Bill? 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1635 It's also handy when the elevator is not working. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1636 Al Roker gave it to me. He didn't need it any more. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1637 It's my new Umbrella Policy. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1638 The problem is when it flips inside out. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1639 I’ve always been a crowd pleaser. 1.2973 0.07618 37 26 11 0
1640 Did you know there's a relationship between umbrella size and hand size? 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1641 It's great for making friends... until I have to close it. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1642 I'm compensating for my small hands! 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1643 The salesman said I could also use it to protect from falling drones. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1644 I bought an umbrella policy with major coverage. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1645 Your folks are late, again. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1646 I got tired of leaving them on the subway. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1647 I'd like to see Gene Kelly try to work with this one. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1648 So you really feel the restaurant won't miss this? 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1649 Come with me if you want to live. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1650 They wanted to call it "California King," but, of course, it doesn't rain there. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1651 You're my first 'Uber' umbrella call. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1652 It came with the 6-pak of cologne I bought. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1653 Not much chance of leaving this one on the bus. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1654 You think this is something, you gotta see the size of their Mai Tais. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1655 Yes, but it's also a beach umbrella that folds to fit in my briefcase. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1656 Went to Ikea for an area rug. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1657 I lost my condo. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1658 I can also use it at the beach or on the patio 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1659 My smartwatch isn't insured against water damage. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1660 Let me know when it stops. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1661 When it rains, I feel very small and lonely. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1662 Please move, it's only meant to cover one person. 1.2973 0.10867 37 30 3 4
1663 Yup, OCD - so please don't step on the cracks. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1664 I’m not trying to make excuses Darleen, I just can’t go out tonight. I have to fold my umbrella. 1.2973 0.07618 37 26 11 0
1665 It's family size. I bought it in Salt Lake City. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1666 Apparently they found a loophole to the golden parachute clause. 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
1667 I'm an empty nester. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1668 THIS is the umbrella policy you've been raving about? 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1669 I still have the rest of the staff to pick up 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1670 Now we can drive the convertible anytime. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1671 I'm having a harder time than I imagined selling advertising space on this thing. 1.2973 0.08547 37 27 9 1
1672 On windy days I use it to commute from home.... 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1673 My insurance broker suggested I increase my coverage. 1.2973 0.09384 37 28 7 2
1674 It'll change a man, twenty years in Risk Management. 1.2955 0.08951 44 34 7 3
1675 Yes, it's yuge, and we're amazingly, fantastically dry. 1.2955 0.09523 44 35 5 4
1676 You can't be too careful when wearing an Apple Watch. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1677 before they get banned by the mayor 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1678 I need to be needed. 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1679 Oversized umbrellas are wonderfully slimming, don't you think? 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1680 It was marketed as a selfie repellant but it also works well in the rain 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1681 What can I say. The Wizard of Oz scared the bejezzus out of me. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1682 Eat your heart out, Mary Poppins. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1683 Originally, it was for the Republican presidential candidates. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1684 I used to have a harem. 1.2941 0.07932 34 24 10 0
1685 I bought it online. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1686 I tried doing a Gene Kelly around the corner but I went airborne. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1687 Guess the monster truck wasn't enough? 1.2941 0.07932 34 24 10 0
1688 You're in my personal space. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1689 I'm prone to overcondensation. 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1690 I'd like to offer you a lifetime of full coverage. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1691 they said I'm too big to fail. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1692 What? I'm wearing suede shoes. 1.2941 0.07932 34 24 10 0
1693 If the others don't show, we are going to look foolish you know. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1694 A big smile wasn't doing it for me. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1695 'I still think we picked-up Donald Trump's by mistake." 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1696 actually , I just cut out the carbs 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1697 My therapist says I have a small penis. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1698 I got a group discount. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1699 Long story short, never ask for "one size fits all " in America. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1700 Take my arm and prepare for lift off. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1701 I take rain very seriously. 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1702 I'm expecting others. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1703 I told you Ms. Poppins gained a little weight as she aged. Still, it was nice of her to remember me in her will. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1704 Oh yes ... it was free with my subscription to the Weather Channel website. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1705 I'm Frank and I will be your Uberella-XL chauffeur. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1706 As Socrates would have said, an insufficiently challenged umbrella is not worth opening. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1707 It's all I have left from my fat days. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1708 I tried using my smile, but I got really wet. 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1709 And when its closed, I use it to pole vault subway turnstiles 1.2941 0.11585 34 28 2 4
1710 Global warming calls for desperate measures. 1.2941 0.11585 34 28 2 4
1711 Your Uber Black Umbrella is arriving now. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1712 ...but don't try to use it on a windy day. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1713 "You should see the top to my convertible!' 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1714 We'll have to turn back. I forgot the pontoon bridge. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1715 I got it in Texas. Why do you ask? 1.2941 0.07932 34 24 10 0
1716 Now that the elephants were forcibly retired, I could pick this up at the circus for a song. 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1717 It's for my entourage…build it and they will come. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1718 Nobody will be at the beach in this weather anyway. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1719 What you mean you're wet? 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1720 I don't usually bring my sister wives on a first date. 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1721 We did get the umbrella policy. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1722 I have to be really careful with even the slightest breeze. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1723 I bought it in Texas. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1724 I know that this is only our first date, but I’d like you to know that I would like to have a large family. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
1725 It's from my polyamorous days. 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1726 Let's go knock the people off the sidewalk on the next block. 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1727 I know you're Becky with the Good Hair, but this is ridiculous. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1728 There was this one time my shoe got wet 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1729 Yes, you're right. I am overcompensating. Let's move on. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1730 I found this at a garage sale at Trump Tower. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1731 I don't think this is what our accountant meant when she said to be prepared for a rainy day. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1732 Bariatric surgery changed everything. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
1733 Actually, it's LGBTQIA now. They're all inside trying to figure out where to pee. 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
1734 Maybe into everybody else's life . . . . 1.2927 0.09399 41 32 6 3
1735 High winds can be a problem. 1.2917 0.07268 48 35 12 1
1736 12 children! 1.2917 0.07854 48 36 10 2
1737 You know, it takes big hands to hold this umbrella. 1.2917 0.08400 48 37 8 3
1738 According to L. L. Bean, it can double as a lifeboat. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1739 I'm a polygamist. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1740 Yeah, it's the platinum plan, the bronze one fit in my drink 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1741 My hands aren't small. It's just that the umbrella is YUGE. I guarantee you there's no problem. 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
1742 Global warming means heavier rain, right? 1.2903 0.08287 31 22 9 0
1743 It doubles as a raft. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1744 It used to belong to Snow White. 1.2895 0.09913 38 30 5 3
1745 I got it at a Trump rally. 1.2895 0.08355 38 28 9 1
1746 And the rent is just $2,500 a month. 1.2895 0.09167 38 29 7 2
1747 Are you over-condensating for something? 1.2895 0.08355 38 28 9 1
1748 You should see the windshield wipers on my car. 1.2895 0.09913 38 30 5 3
1749 It's lots of fun when I bring it on the subway. 1.2895 0.09913 38 30 5 3
1750 Yes, i'm over-compensating, but tell me, who's dry, again?! 1.2895 0.09167 38 29 7 2
1751 I'm a belt and suspenders and gigantic umbrella kind of guy. 1.2895 0.09167 38 29 7 2
1752 Why yes, I do also drive a Porsche. Why do you ask? 1.2895 0.09913 38 30 5 3
1753 If it doesn't stop, I've got a boat. 1.2895 0.09167 38 29 7 2
1754 Can you believe it folds up to fill a toothbrush holder? 1.2895 0.08355 38 28 9 1
1755 Little under the weather this morning ? 1.2895 0.09913 38 30 5 3
1756 Mine's bigger 1.2889 0.08775 45 35 7 3
1757 It's a bit tricky on a windy day. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1758 I'm looking for someone to share my personal space. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1759 I'm having trouble getting a cab. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1760 It keeps my phone dry during selfies. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1761 When I purchased a new policy, the Travelers salesman gave it to me. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1762 You still want me to throw my jacket on that puddle? 1.2857 0.11281 35 29 2 4
1763 Good. That takes care of the rain. Now, about that puddle... 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1764 This is cheaper than Match.com 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1765 Then they say size doesn't matter. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1766 I received it from PBS. I suspect I needn't tell you that it was a sizable donation. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1767 Insurance. You? 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1768 It's great in the rain but a challenge in the subway. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1769 Sometimes more is a lot more. 1.2857 0.07748 35 25 10 0
1770 I'm trying to be more inclusive. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1771 My last shared ride was in a convertible. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1772 You should see my gazebo. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1773 It's my company's logo, why do you ask ? 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1774 I walk-pool. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1775 Republicans don't have a big tent. But they are selling these large umbrellas. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1776 It's HUGE !! I got it at the Trump Store. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1777 You're right. Size does matter. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1778 And that's when I said, "I'm never getting wet again." 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1779 The mug was really too big 1.2857 0.12448 28 23 2 3
1780 Be careful! There's a puddle up ahead! 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1781 With this you don't need a raincoat. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1782 You should see my gloves and galoshes. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1783 I borrowed it from your mother. 1.2857 0.07835 42 31 10 1
1784 Yuuuge. I'm tellin' ya. For my many, many friends... 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1785 I think you're over-condensating. 1.2857 0.10102 28 21 6 1
1786 It makes me feel important. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1787 This wasn't really what I had in mind when my insurer said they would provide me with maximum coverage... 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1788 I wish my portfolio was this big. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1789 it is just a prototype. There are still some problems in a high wind. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1790 Sorry this is my class-action umbrella. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1791 Sorry, but I need my space... 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1792 Because I'm using product in my hair today. Do you mind? 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1793 We had season tickets until the people behind us complained. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1794 Your turn, my arm is tired. 1.2857 0.07748 35 25 10 0
1795 Do you suppose "Tavern on the Green" knows this is missing? 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1796 If the wind blows I'll see you next week? 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1797 Does Paul Bunyan know you borrowed his umbrella? 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1798 it makes me feel like a one percenter. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1799 Let's go; the others are a no show. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1800 So... Do you like a guy with a big umbrella??? 1.2857 0.08694 28 20 8 0
1801 It comfortably stands two families of six. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1802 You said our umbrella coverage policy should be bigger. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1803 I like to do a little something for the homeless. 1.2857 0.11281 35 29 2 4
1804 I crowd sourced it. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1805 Don't complain at least the rent is cheap. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1806 But it's the smallest they had at CostCo. 1.2857 0.10102 28 21 6 1
1807 You wouldn't believe how fat I was. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1808 I know, this umbrella makes my hands look smaller. But don't read anything into that. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1809 Hopefully your mother fits under this one 1.2857 0.08544 42 32 8 2
1810 I think he was overcompensating for his small rain jacket 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1811 I DONT CARE WHAT SIR WALTER RALEIGH DID, WALK AROUND IT. 1.2857 0.10102 28 21 6 1
1812 Need a lift? I'm leaving with the next gust of wind. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1813 Picked it up at Neiman Marcus; Dallas. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1814 I guarantee you there’s no problem, I guarantee it. 1.2857 0.09199 42 33 6 3
1815 Those other ones are for mini golfers. 1.2857 0.08544 42 32 8 2
1816 It makes my hands look small? 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1817 Call me crazy, but I have a cousin who lost an eye under his moderately sized umbrella. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1818 Mother says I'm compensating. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1819 Politically speaking, I'm a big tent sort of guy. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1820 What?! It's my TRUMPbrella 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1821 Our deluxe model doubles as a life raft 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1822 Screw that 'let a smile be your umbrella' crap. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1823 I can't offer you happiness or financial security, but at least you'll always be dry. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1824 I didn't have a golden parachute.... 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1825 Yes it can be difficult in a wind. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1826 Don't worry, I've got you covered. 1.2857 0.10102 28 21 6 1
1827 I got it as part of my severance from that insurance company I used to work for. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1828 Are we going to Costcos or Sam's Club? 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1829 Uber always charges me extra. 1.2857 0.07748 35 25 10 0
1830 And it's piano proof. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1831 We are the one percent, prepared for the ninety-nine percent chance of rain. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1832 My insurance broker recommended a bigger umbrella. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1833 Why yes, I am in the Insurance business. Why do you ask? 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1834 Just want to make sure we're covered. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1835 The only thing I have to worry about, is the wind. 1.2857 0.07748 35 25 10 0
1836 Mr Trump loaned it to me. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1837 I lost quite a bit of weight. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1838 Unfortunately, it works better during a sprinkle - I've learned not to use it during a hurricane. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1839 In some cases, size does matter. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1840 Whaddaya mean, I always overdo it. 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1841 We're way ahead of the curve on climate change. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1842 I think it's your turn to hold the umbrella for a few hours. 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1843 I just love my new umbrella policy!! 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1844 The others should be along any second. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1845 My smile wasn't getting the job done. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1846 It was a Door Prize at the Paul Bunyon Golf Outting 1.2857 0.10509 35 28 4 3
1847 Not sure this justifies our higher insurance premium. 1.2857 0.07055 42 30 12 0
1848 That was a great lunch, but don't you think the food portions in America are just way out of hand? 1.2857 0.11336 28 22 4 2
1849 I thought I was buying insurance 1.2857 0.08765 35 26 8 1
1850 You should see my toothpicks. 1.2830 0.08249 53 42 7 4
1851 I took out the comprehensive umbrella policy. 1.2826 0.08605 46 36 7 3
1852 the policy said extended umbrella coverage 1.2821 0.08960 39 30 7 2
1853 You wanted the best coverage for a rainy day. 1.2821 0.09684 39 31 5 3
1854 The forecast called for rain with a chance of Trump. 1.2821 0.10357 39 32 3 4
1855 I recently lost a LOT of weight. 1.2821 0.08172 39 29 9 1
1856 Where's the rest of your group? 1.2821 0.08172 39 29 9 1
1857 It was a gift from Mr. Trump. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1858 It's called a crowd pleaser. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1859 Revolving doors can be a little tricky, but it’s got an inflatable airbag for falling pianos. 1.2812 0.11211 32 26 3 3
1860 They said there'd be a big storm today. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1861 I used to be very close to Chris Christie. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1862 Can you grab this? I want to be a gentleman and carry you over the puddle. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1863 I'm picking up two more people. 1.2812 0.08075 32 23 9 0
1864 You know what they say about a man with a big umbrella... 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1865 In the worse case scenario, it doubles as a life boat. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1866 It's an alpha umbrella 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1867 And when you press this button it turns into a waterbed! 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1868 If it rains harder I'll get out my really big umbrella. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1869 I can host up to nine clients with my Uberella. 1.2812 0.11211 32 26 3 3
1870 In live in Manhattan so I can't overcompensate with a sports car. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1871 I work in insurance. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1872 The existential uncertainty used to bother me. But now, I control the weather. 1.2812 0.11211 32 26 3 3
1873 It's ten minutes from public transportation and rents for $3,500 a month -- a frank bargain for a wall-less studio in any part of Manhattan. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1874 Enough already! I can't sing and I can't dance. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1875 I'm compensating. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1876 I crowd funded it. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1877 There's no deductible with this coverage. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1878 It's for when it's raining cats and dogs. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1879 I got it at a big box store. 1.2800 0.12275 25 20 3 2
1880 Honey, I signed up on shareyourumbrella.com and we are picking up another couple on 14st and 7th. 1.2800 0.09165 25 18 7 0
1881 They only had the Texas size left in stock 1.2800 0.12275 25 20 3 2
1882 My rainy day fund is even bigger. 1.2800 0.10832 25 19 5 1
1883 On weekends, I lead huge tour groups. 1.2800 0.09165 25 18 7 0
1884 It's really great for widespread rain. 1.2791 0.06921 43 31 12 0
1885 You don't look quite the way I'd pictured you. 1.2791 0.09007 43 34 6 3
1886 I never liked the idea of a satellite 'pinpointing' me. 1.2778 0.10244 36 29 4 3
1887 So, how many children do you want to have? 1.2778 0.09437 36 28 6 2
1888 Now are you glad I shop at Costco? 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1889 Not what I had in mind when I signed up for a group coverage plan. 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1890 This is my way of reaching out. 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1891 The weather forecast called for drizzle. I left the big one at home. 1.2778 0.09437 36 28 6 2
1892 There's a happy hour with HUGE pina coladas at the bar around the corner. 1.2778 0.09437 36 28 6 2
1893 Look on the bright side Phyllis, at least it's not windy. 1.2778 0.09437 36 28 6 2
1894 My therapist thinks I'm overcompensating; on the bright side, this was less expensive than a Porsche. 1.2778 0.09437 36 28 6 2
1895 it's pretty great until the wind picks up. 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1896 Gene Kelly would not like it. 1.2778 0.07571 36 26 10 0
1897 Put the look away, your weight has nothing to do with it. 1.2778 0.09437 36 28 6 2
1898 Stop giving me that look. The umbrella was on sale at Costco. 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1899 We were smart not to bring the big umbrella. 1.2778 0.07571 36 26 10 0
1900 Into each life some rain must fall, but not if I can help it. 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1901 You come here often. 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1902 You've been shopping at CostCo again, haven't you? 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1903 We're the country's biggest umbrella importer. 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1904 What'll we do with this damn thing when it stops. 1.2778 0.09437 36 28 6 2
1905 Just think of it as the poor man's golden parachute. 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1906 If it stays this way for four hours, I'm supposed to call a meteorologist 1.2778 0.10244 36 29 4 3
1907 I brought some extra protection. 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1908 It not only doubles as a Kayak, and deflects UV Rays, it also has as parachute capabilities which are quite robust. 1.2778 0.09437 36 28 6 2
1909 It also repels drones 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1910 It was a steal at the patio sale. 1.2778 0.09437 36 28 6 2
1911 You should see the size of my rubbers. 1.2778 0.10991 36 30 2 4
1912 How do I know that you like me for me? 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1913 If it clears up there's always the beach. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1914 My ark is in the shop. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1915 I'm wearing cashmere. 1.2750 0.07996 40 30 9 1
1916 We'll be okay as long as the wind doesn't come up. 1.2750 0.07996 40 30 9 1
1917 I used to shop at Big and Tall. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1918 It's for presidential candidates who need to compensate for small hands. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1919 Trump has got one almost as big. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1920 When you're a rain-maker you've gotta be prepared. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1921 I think we should downgrade to something more sustainable. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1922 I wanted to be prepared for cats and dogs. 1.2727 0.10900 33 27 3 3
1923 I love how the rain clears the streets 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1924 Got it from some guy named Noah. he said he didn't need it anymore. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1925 I'm voting for Hillary. Isn't that enough? 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1926 It was supposed to rain today. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1927 I'm not that popular. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1928 It's a leftover from the Obama campaigns. I asked for a smaller one, but they said "Sorry, everyone should be covered." 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1929 I told you this universal coverage would come in handy on rainy days. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1930 The salesgirl talked me into the jumbrella 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1931 I want to be as inclusive as possible. 1.2727 0.07873 33 24 9 0
1932 Yeah, but it does allow me to say "colossal bumbershoot" a lot. 1.2727 0.10900 33 27 3 3
1933 Acid rain is making a comeback. 1.2727 0.07873 33 24 9 0
1934 My therapist says I am overcompensating for a poor, self body image. 1.2727 0.07873 33 24 9 0
1935 I have substantial umbrella coverage but hurricane coverage costs extra 1.2727 0.10900 33 27 3 3
1936 Size doesn't matter, right? 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1937 I have a really small...policy. 1.2727 0.08823 44 35 6 3
1938 Uber started an umbrella sharing service. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1939 ...and that puddle is exactly why I said you should have worn your rain boots. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1940 I'm aquaphobic. What's your phobia? 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1941 *I guess you know I'm an undercover agent.* 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1942 Sorry there is only room for one 1.2727 0.10900 33 27 3 3
1943 It Gets Good Mileage When The Wind Kicks Up 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1944 I bet you're glad now that I got that extra umbrella coverage from our insurance agent. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1945 I'm not sure when Trump started selling umbrellas. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1946 Supercalifragilistic that baby! 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1947 It's not quite the umbrella account I was hoping for. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1948 I'm having a great hair day. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1949 It came with my umbrella policy. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1950 What color is YOUR umbrella? 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1951 It's also a great tax shelter 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1952 It was found in the Ark's emergency kit. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1953 It complicates my Gene Kelly impersonation. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1954 I got it at the Republican Party "Discontinued Strategies" outlet. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1955 No, really. I'm ready to start a family now. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1956 It has nothing to do with the size of my fingers. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1957 My head used to be much larger. 1.2727 0.10900 33 27 3 3
1958 Well--I couldn't afford a golden parachute. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1959 My insurance agent included it as part of my extended coverage plan. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1960 It came with my martini Venti. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1961 Your health care provider sent me. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1962 You know what they say?...the bigger the umbrella... 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1963 At the Gulliver Store, why? 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1964 I know, but the forecast called for wide-spread rain. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1965 Mother got it from our patio, added her cane, and said, "Go find a good woman who wants to be protected." 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1966 I got it in Dallas. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1967 Yes, I do believe it's possible to find love in the age of Global Warming. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1968 'Meteor shower tonight' 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1969 Hey, just because Shark Tank wasn't interested doesn't mean it's not a great product. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1970 It's a crowd pleaser, but I worry about the wind. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1971 I got it on eBay -- Trump's childhood umbrella. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1972 How did you guess I was a tour guide? 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1973 Some guy was selling Yooooge Umbrellas outside the Trump Plaza. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1974 It's my umbrella umbrella. 1.2727 0.10900 33 27 3 3
1975 It's part of the Trump collection. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1976 We anticipate a large family. 1.2703 0.09209 37 29 6 2
1977 I told you that discount patio furniture would come in handy some day! 1.2703 0.07402 37 27 10 0
1978 It's the next best thing to a golden parachute. 1.2683 0.07828 41 31 9 1
1979 What? I'm heavier than Mary Poppins. Need more updraft. 1.2683 0.08571 41 32 7 2
1980 We can take turns holding it if you want. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1981 Is it true that women can judge the size of a man's hand by the size of his umbrella? 1.2667 0.11679 30 25 2 3
1982 They give you this with the million dollar policy. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1983 I'm working on a TV treatment called "The Flying Actuary." 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1984 Well, you know what they say, big hands, big umbrella. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1985 I did not realize it was for group coverage. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1986 Why yes, I was a paratrooper. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1987 ...and I'm gonna make the raindrops pay for it. 1.2667 0.08040 45 35 8 2
1988 I bought it at a photographer's estate sale. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1989 Your mother thinks I exaggerate my income, too. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1990 It's my insurance policy; it covers everything. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1991 If you walk six steps ahead so I can't hear your whining, you'll still stay dry. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1992 The life vests are in my briefcase. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1993 You're not impressing anyone with that thing 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1994 I don't have many friends. I thought I'd try a different mousetrap. 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
1995 I'm waiting for the flash mob. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
1996 I contain multitudes. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
1997 Why aren't there any other pedestrians on his side of the street? 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
1998 If it gets too rainy, we have a boat. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
1999 All us actuaries carry these risk-reducer models. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2000 If the wind starts to blow I will have to give you a very quick good by kiss. 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2001 How do you feel about the New Yorker using crowd sourcing to judge the caption contest? 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2002 Yes dear, this umbrella does make your rear look smaller. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2003 Bought it on the net – good for crowd sourcing. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2004 Excuse me, ma'am, did I say you could stand under my umbrella? 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2005 I like to cover all bases! 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2006 I decided to expand my umbrella policy. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2007 It came free with the Barrel Mai Tai. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2008 I was expecting a bigger storm. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2009 Maybe it's time to downsize. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2010 The boss said we're now part of a large umbrella organization. 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2011 This is a crowdfunded umbrella. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2012 John, you don't need to prove anything. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2013 It's a problem getting into a cab. 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2014 Because the rain refuses to get smaller. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2015 My Ex-wife was quite large. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2016 Glad I could help, but I'm waiting for the yoga class to let out. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2017 I valeted at a weight-loss spa. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2018 Mary Poppins should'a had one of these babies!!! 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2019 Well you did say last night that you wished I had a really big one. 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2020 It's one of the benefits for working for Traveler's Insurance. 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2021 This thing will blow you away! 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2022 I opted for the umbrella coverage this year. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2023 Everything at my bank is too big to fail. 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2024 Well honey, you thought my Urban Sombrero was too brash... 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2025 I once worked in a lab. I spilled Growth Hormone all over my briefcase. 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2026 It's a Christo and Jeanne-Claude reject. 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2027 And on windy days, I don't need a taxi at all. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2028 I've lost a few pounds since I bought it. 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2029 This is good! We will never be under the weather. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2030 It's one of the neat things about having a brother-in-law who's a mortician." 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2031 Donald Trump gave it to me. Seems it wasn't big enough to fit his ego. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2032 It has nothing to do with my manhood. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2033 Yeah, I bought it in Texas. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2034 The guy sold me on global warming. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2035 People think I'm shady. 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2036 I got it at a discount from Costco. 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2037 I plan to sell ad space on it and under it. 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2038 It used to belong to Donald Trump 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2039 You actually expect me to walk you somewhere? 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2040 You should see it folded up. 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2041 My insurance agent suggested I purchase an umbrella policy that would cover most anything. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2042 I told you we'd get get our money's worth from our new patio furniture. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2043 Since we're being honest, I should also probably tell you that I never liked pina coladas. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2044 I'm hoping for a big wind on the commute home 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2045 It seems a bit much now that the elephant act is gone. 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2046 I've recently lost weight. 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2047 Sing all you want, but I'm staying dry ! 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2048 "I don't know, I just got tired of being referred to as a wet blanket". 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2049 I'm polyamorous. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2050 I ordered an uber convertible. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2051 All it takes is anything above a zephyr and I've got my Mary Poppins moment. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2052 My mother gave it to me. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2053 It sells more policies than rolling out the coffin. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2054 When is your mother meeting us? 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2055 It belongs to my big brother. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2056 Small hands. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2057 What? My agent told me I needed comprehensive umbrella coverage. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2058 It's a golf thing, you wouldn't understand. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2059 They say it's made from the belly of a whale. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2060 It was on sale. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2061 The guy told me it was cats and dogs proof. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2062 Miss, mind laying down your coat? 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2063 I said get us a large umbrella insurance policy! 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2064 Even our umbrella is 'too big to fail'! 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2065 I'm hydrophobic. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2066 My friends say I'm risk-averse. I personally don't see it. 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2067 When I bought it there were seventeen Republican candidates. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2068 Army Surplus, why do you ask? 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2069 Got it from Trump. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2070 What's wrong in preparing for the worst case scenario? 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2071 It's an El Niño special 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2072 Used to be my big smile was enough . 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2073 They said it was raining cats and dogs. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2074 Honestly, it looked much cooler in the Hammacher Schlemmer catalog. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2075 Haven't you heard of El Niño? 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2076 "You can stand under my umbrella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella...Ella... 1.2647 0.10605 34 28 3 3
2077 It's the global warming model. It doubles as a boat when sea levels rise too high. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2078 It's from our patio. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2079 It's called a portable awning. 1.2647 0.09728 34 27 5 2
2080 You can call it over-compensation. I call it prudence. 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2081 I bought it with my rainy day fund. 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2082 I had that lap-band procedure. 1.2647 0.07680 34 25 9 0
2083 With EL NINO you need more than a song! 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
2084 It protects us from rain, pigeon droppings and your stray unfulfilled stockbroker. 1.2632 0.08992 38 30 6 2
2085 I also where suspenders and a belt. 1.2632 0.09751 38 31 4 3
2086 Apparently when they advertised 'protection against all storms', they weren't considering those within our relationship 1.2632 0.08992 38 30 6 2
2087 What are you compensating for with that umbrella? 1.2632 0.09751 38 31 4 3
2088 The forecast was for scattered showers. 1.2632 0.07239 38 28 10 0
2089 You should look into an umbrella policy. 1.2632 0.08992 38 30 6 2
2090 A YUGE storm is brewing. 1.2619 0.08389 42 33 7 2
2091 Into each life a little rain must fall....but no you have to go overboard. 1.2609 0.07885 46 36 8 2
2092 I thought "supersize me" was a good idea at the time. 1.2593 0.08594 27 20 7 0
2093 It's part of the mid-life crisis collection. 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
2094 It's a rugby umbrella 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
2095 No honey, it's not because I think you're fat. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
2096 Amazon Prime umbrella. 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
2097 I bought it from Kim Kardashian’s umbrella guy. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
2098 I keep it on the patio table at home. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
2099 I picked it up at a rally for a guy who said, "It's gonna be huge!" 1.2593 0.08594 27 20 7 0
2100 It's called a Big Ass Umbrella 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
2101 Overcompensating for what? 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2102 The insurance broker said we need umbrella coverage for the whole family 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2103 Yeah, maybe, but I forgot my hat and galoshes. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2104 Look at it this way, I get to meet you, talk to you, and you don't have to stand too close. 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2105 I got it when I signed up for an umbrella insurance policy. 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
2106 I think our shelter needs are covered now. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2107 I picked it up from Boeing's new Mary Poppins division. 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2108 I know, I know... It's huuuuuuuuge 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
2109 Look what I bought at Noahs garage sale 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2110 Got it a dollar store. Great bargain! 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2111 Umbrella coverage 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2112 It's a Duck-umbrell-AH. Flip it over and it becomes a rowboat. 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2113 Well, I REALLY wish it was "Self Opening". 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2114 The whole point is --not-- to be seen from space. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2115 He referred to my umbrella, 'if it's small, something else must be small.' I guarantee you there's no problem. I guarantee." 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2116 Look at this umbrella. I guarantee you there's no problem. 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
2117 I invested all of my money into this rainy-day fund. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2118 Do you think they'll all show up? 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2119 It's bad luck to open this one outdoors too. 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
2120 Let's have some people over! 1.2581 0.11329 31 26 2 3
2121 It keeps me from opening it inside. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2122 You know what they say about men who carry big umbrellas... 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2123 No honey, I don't think you're fat. Why do you ask? 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2124 The salesman said a USB cable is all we need to protect our home network from the cloud. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2125 You wouldn't believe what a bargain this was. 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2126 It's a little tricky to carry on the subway. 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
2127 Trump promises everything will be HUGH, but this is ridiculous. 1.2581 0.11329 31 26 2 3
2128 That's not the only thing that's big. 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2129 i need to get a bigger briefcase 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2130 Honey, you know the rule; a Goldman partner never takes risk. That's what clients are for. 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
2131 I borrowed it from Donald Trump's ego 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2132 The ambiance sucked, but they serve one hell of a piña colada. 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
2133 You can get anything at Cosco 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2134 I misunderstood the salesman when he said, "All the rain will bounce off this umbrella." 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2135 My advisor keeps telling me to increase our umbrella coverage. Just this month we went from parasol to patio. 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2136 It does the job, but the wifi is weak. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2137 Given what might happen to us in the future, I thought it would be a good investment. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2138 My taxman says I have to reduce my overhead. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2139 Usually, I wear suspenders with a belt too. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2140 It's big, but it works better than a smile. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2141 What made you think we needed an umbrella for eight? 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2142 This umbrella isn't big enough for the two of us. 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2143 I had a free choice with a one-year subscription, but I already have a document shredder. 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
2144 In case there's cats and dogs. 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
2145 Weird, usually by the time I get to a puddle they are all dried up. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2146 Teddy Roosevelt actually said, "Walk softly and carry a big umbrella". 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
2147 American? 1.2581 0.11329 31 26 2 3
2148 I need to renegotiate the terms of my umbrella policy with my insurance company. 1.2571 0.10325 35 29 3 3
2149 I've always said speak softly and carry a big umbrella! 1.2571 0.08543 35 27 7 1
2150 It may not fit in my brief case, but with a good, stiff breeze, I can cover ten blocks. 1.2571 0.07495 35 26 9 0
2151 You can stand under my umbrella-ella-ella 1.2571 0.08543 35 27 7 1
2152 It's not rain. It's the tears of the establishment. 1.2571 0.10325 35 29 3 3
2153 It was on sale at Costco. 1.2571 0.08543 35 27 7 1
2154 If the boss tosses me - I've got my parachute. 1.2571 0.09476 35 28 5 2
2155 I used to be a big man in this town. 1.2571 0.09476 35 28 5 2
2156 They said climate change was only gonna get worse, so I upgraded. 1.2571 0.09476 35 28 5 2
2157 I bought it at Andre the Giant's estate sale. 1.2571 0.09476 35 28 5 2
2158 Got it from Christie. 1.2571 0.10325 35 29 3 3
2159 I strive for universal coverage. 1.2571 0.10325 35 29 3 3
2160 I got it online. 1.2571 0.08543 35 27 7 1
2161 And on windy days it's faster than taking I-75. 1.2571 0.09476 35 28 5 2
2162 I compensate in other ways too. 1.2571 0.08543 35 27 7 1
2163 You know what they say about men with big umbrellas......dry wits. 1.2571 0.10325 35 29 3 3
2164 I miss the kids. 1.2571 0.08543 35 27 7 1
2165 I should disclose to you that I'm extremely thorough. 1.2571 0.08543 35 27 7 1
2166 WOW! You do have a big one! 1.2564 0.09522 39 32 4 3
2167 ... My last wife was a witch... 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2168 I've taken extreme measures to not drip with sarcasm. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2169 You're right, it's not mine! Well, no wonder the waiters put up such a fight! 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2170 I need my space....dry, dry space. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2171 But it came with wifi and Bluetooth 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2172 I miss Babar. 1.2500 0.08333 36 28 7 1
2173 Atkins. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
2174 It's manspreading. I walk to work. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2175 Shame it doesn't come in orange. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2176 This way, you can walk a few steps ahead and no one will suspect we're together. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2177 I don't know you, but my psychiatrist said I needed to share something with others. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2178 Your personal umbrella policy protects you from rain but not puddles. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
2179 It's from my insurance company. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2180 And when its gets windy, I can float home. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2181 I want a divorce, but I don't want to leave you uncovered. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2182 Mine's bigger than his. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2183 I 'm going to the beach later... 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2184 I'm so glad I finally went on Aquaphobia.com 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
2185 I've got friends. 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2186 I don't want to brag, but did you notice the size of my hands, too? 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2187 In case Trump wins. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
2188 So what makes you think that I work in the insurance business? 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
2189 I need enough room for me and all of my multiple personalities. 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2190 He was right - even American umbrellas are Great Again. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
2191 Ringling Bros. was having a clearance sale. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2192 I only use it because you bought it for me. 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2193 You know what they say about men who have big umbrellas... 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2194 I got the largest policy I could afford. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2195 Please make sure to bring your own umbrella is the future. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2196 Call me an idealist. I just want to bring people closer together. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2197 You think this is impressive? I have 17 smoke alarms at home. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2198 It was originally designed for the Wicked Witch of the West. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2199 I couldn't afford my mortgage, so I got this umbrella instead. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2200 Trust me, we'll need it if Trump is elected. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2201 Let it rain. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2202 I have a big-umbrella policy. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2203 I sell insurance. It’s an umbrella policy. 1.2500 0.09029 24 18 6 0
2204 I'm running for mayor and could not afford a big tent. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
2205 The only downside is the wrath of tall passersby. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2206 Now what, I have to build you a bridge too? 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2207 I'm bringing it to the Republican National Convention 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2208 How did you know that I came from a really big family 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2209 I thought I was ordering a comprehensive insurance policy. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2210 Welcome to Umber. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2211 I kept it from my days as a big tent Republican. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2212 I'm grandiose, NOT overprotective! 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2213 I was a boy scout. Be prepared was my motto. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2214 The dealership was out of loan cars, so they gave me this. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2215 Did I activate the home security system before we left? 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2216 No, I am NOT overcompensating for something. 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2217 My mother always told me to carry an umbrella. And, of course, she was a giant. 1.2500 0.10999 32 27 2 3
2218 10 people signed up for the event I created on Facebook... 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2219 These Trump umbrellas really are yuuuuge. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2220 ...a close-out sale on patio furniture. All sales were final. 1.2500 0.09237 36 29 5 2
2221 It just dawned on me that we haven't been out for a walk in the rain together since before our gastric bypass surgeries. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2222 My insurance broker says I'm taking the most conservative approach. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2223 I need it for work. I do chalk outlines. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2224 I apologize for being too overprotective. 1.2500 0.09303 40 33 4 3
2225 It's called the Freddie Gray model because it's large, black, and in poor taste. 1.2500 0.10999 32 27 2 3
2226 I've always thought you were a Republican... 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2227 There's absolutely no pleasing you. My last umbrella was too small, now.....I give up ! 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2228 I got it used from Mary Poppins after she quit as nanny for Octomom. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2229 Sorry babe, I know I can be overprotective. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
2230 My OCD is wide-ranging. 1.2500 0.07804 40 31 8 1
2231 I thought you were inviting your friends. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2232 I'm trying to widen my social circle. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2233 They said there's a 40% chance of anvil. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2234 This came in the mail when I signed up for Obama Care. 1.2500 0.10999 32 27 2 3
2235 I got it for two bucks at King Kong's estate sale. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2236 Yes, people certainly do say something about a man who has a big umbrella. 1.2500 0.10999 32 27 2 3
2237 You didn't look as thin on the picture. 1.2500 0.08333 36 28 7 1
2238 Do you see the size of these hands? 1.2500 0.08681 48 40 4 4
2239 Do you know why we have trouble getting a taxi? 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2240 Now do you understand how I'm going to Make Umbrellas Great Again? 1.2500 0.09237 36 29 5 2
2241 Do you still think we should downsize? 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2242 When I'm outdoors in the rain, that's when I really need my space. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2243 Well it helps with my hydrophobia... plus my biceps are ripped! 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2244 I got it at Costco. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2245 So now you know what half a star on Priceline looks like. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2246 Our umbrella policy won't leave you high and dry. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2247 Yea, it was on special at Costco... 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2248 You have no idea the pleasures that can be had by saying the hell with everybody else 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2249 You should see the size of the drink I got it from. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2250 If we live in Seattle we need more than a tote. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2251 Personal space. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2252 Remember that expensive umbrella policy Tod Kiegelmann sold us? 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2253 I brought the big one, in case you forgot the breath mints. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2254 It's a Christo. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2255 Um, do you have any idea what it takes to keep a roof over our heads? 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2256 I don't know why, I just like Donald Trump. 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2257 It's previous owners were the Kardashians." 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2258 What Sting wouldn't give for THIS umbrella! 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2259 My insurance company recommended an increase in my coverage. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2260 "Its sustainable, made up entirely from repurposed batman costumes". 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2261 It was hard to find one big enough for my ego. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2262 I bought the "climate change" size just in case. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2263 They loved me at Burning Man. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
2264 It's a NATO umbrella. Its big, but it doesn't work very well on the East Side. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2265 I also require extra large condoms. 1.2500 0.09237 36 29 5 2
2266 I just want to be sure I'm ready if this shower is part of climate change. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
2267 Sure, it keeps me dry, but taking it on the subway is a huge pain in the ass. 1.2500 0.09237 36 29 5 2
2268 I got this from my donation to the Trump campaign. 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2269 This jacket is suede. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2270 How did you guess that I'm from Seattle? 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2271 Good cover is essential to a spy 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2272 At least in some regards, size does matter. 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2273 My ex thought I was overcompensating for something. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2274 Yeah, but the slightest breeze... 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2275 It's a dick thing. 1.2500 0.11880 32 28 0 4
2276 Do you think it strikes the right note of middle aged whimsy? 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2277 Now remember, grab my arm at the first sign of a strong gust of wind and don't let go until we've touched down again. 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2278 It's not my fault you didn't come prepared. Get out. 1.2500 0.10999 32 27 2 3
2279 I ordered it online from "Beanstalk Enterprises". 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2280 Believe me, when it's pouring I'm a real popular guy. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2281 I'm participating in the sharing economy. 1.2500 0.10999 32 27 2 3
2282 I wish there were more pickup trucks on Uber. 1.2500 0.10999 32 27 2 3
2283 believe me my hands are fine, you know normal, they just look small because of the umbrella 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2284 This must be what they meant by 'shrink-resistant'. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2285 I'm overcompensating because I don't smile that much. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2286 Working for The Travelers has its perks. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2287 Well, at least I can get one thing up when the time is right. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2288 Gutters? This thing is impractical enough. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2289 You always told me "Go big or go home." 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2290 I am NOT insisting that size matters! 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2291 Do you mind if we avoid Fifth Avenue? 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2292 No, I'm not trying to compensate for anything. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2293 Yeah but I've been flagged by Uber. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2294 It's the new flash mob model. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
2295 Shall I turn the WiFi on? 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
2296 Today I bought us five more life insurance policies. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2297 I can't help it. I have a really big smile. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2298 Yes, it's bigger than my ex-husband's. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2299 Ma'am, you can never have too much coverage. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2300 I tried the smile thing but this is better. 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2301 Always prepared for company. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2302 With all the stress going on in the top floors you can never be too careful 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2303 What, now you have a case of umbrella envy? 1.2500 0.10040 32 26 4 2
2304 I don't think we need to buy everything at Costco. 1.2500 0.07777 32 24 8 0
2305 Works better than online dating. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
2306 Wind gusts can be a bit tricky. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
2307 My insurance agent told me I need more coverage for a rainy day. 1.2444 0.07885 45 36 7 2
2308 It prevents shrinkage. 1.2439 0.08396 41 33 6 2
2309 OK, maybe we didn't need the 6' Plus. 1.2432 0.08133 37 29 7 1
2310 It's the Presidential model, designed to cover even the biggest head. 1.2432 0.08133 37 29 7 1
2311 "My retinue of flunkies will arrive shortly". 1.2432 0.08133 37 29 7 1
2312 I got it a the one percent store. 1.2424 0.10687 33 28 2 3
2313 It's like Uber but with an umbrella. That'll be fifteen dollars. 1.2424 0.10687 33 28 2 3
2314 I used to work at Traveler's… 1.2424 0.07576 33 25 8 0
2315 I'm just waiting for it to rain cats and dogs. 1.2424 0.09761 33 27 4 2
2316 You told me that bigger is better. 1.2424 0.08737 33 26 6 1
2317 Did you really need to buy 5 of these? 1.2424 0.09761 33 27 4 2
2318 I thought you said it was going to be a flash mob. 1.2424 0.09761 33 27 4 2
2319 I'm only slightly compensating. 1.2424 0.07576 33 25 8 0
2320 It clears your path on the sidewalk, as well. 1.2424 0.07576 33 25 8 0
2321 I got this from the Republican party, they decided they didn't need a big umbrella. 1.2424 0.08737 33 26 6 1
2322 It's called the 'Trumprella.' 1.2424 0.10687 33 28 2 3
2323 This is how your umbrella policy works. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2324 I've lost a little weight since I got this... 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2325 I finally found a way to repurpose some of our patio furniture since moving to the city. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2326 Could you please give me a little room here? 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2327 "Well, you always say we should meet new people". 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2328 I hope the guy I 'borrowed' this from isn't looking for me. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2329 In the event of a wind gust, I'll start dinner. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2330 Sorry, there's just enough room for me and my ego. 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2331 I only use it during the silly season. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2332 I meet a lot of women when I pull this out. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2333 It was advertised as a portable bus stop. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2334 Our umbrella organization is trying to be more inclusive. 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2335 Donald Trump's hair umbrella. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2336 Won't your wife be in trouble without her umbrella, Mr. Poppins 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2337 I bought it before I went on the biggest loser 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2338 Hazel, you asked me to think big. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2339 I now it's large, I bought it at Trump Tower. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2340 Is that puddle purple? 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2341 Well at least we're not homeless anymore. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2342 Hold the umbrella and I will put my raincoat over the puddle for you 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2343 Thanks Obama. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2344 The city's DIY bus stop shelter plan is working out pretty well, don't you think? 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2345 Believe me, our insurance plan provides maximum coverage. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2346 I got talked into umbrella insurance. I really should have read the fine-print. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2347 I said condensation, not compensation! 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2348 It was your father who said, go big or go home. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2349 I thought they meant a Golden parachute... 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2350 My therapist says I'm overcompensating. For once I agree, but I don't pay him that much to tell me the obvious! 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2351 Alice, next time we take one of your pills, tell me first what it will do. 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2352 It came with the insurance policy I bought 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2353 It came with a little one for the microclimate it creates. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2354 It may get a bit crowded if it comes down heavier! 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2355 Actually, it's from my patio table. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2356 Basically, I work for a big umbrella corporation. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2357 Oh, so you think I'm over-compensating for the size of my hands? 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2358 The weather report says there's a big storm on the way. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2359 Did they say anything about wind with this rain? 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2360 The best part of it is, in the event of a flood, you simply turn it upside down and it becomes a life raft. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2361 'El Niño' might be late, but it's still coming. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2362 I super-sized it at Brooks Brothers. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2363 My name is Noah. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2364 I can't afford to build an ark. 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2365 Wait 'til you see the Trump galoshes that came with it! 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2366 I just don't hear the laughter in the rain anymore since you bought this stupid thing. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2367 You said it was raining cats and dogs. 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2368 Oh and they're front row seats too! 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2369 Too much is never enough. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2370 Accounting says we have too much overhead. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2371 Sorry, there's only room for me and my ego. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2372 Trump said it wasn't big enough. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2373 I wonder if this umbrella is big enough to save us from Trump. 1.2414 0.11802 29 25 1 3
2374 Climate change, you know. 1.2414 0.11802 29 25 1 3
2375 You see, I know this guy named Noah... 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2376 Are you from Texas? 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2377 The umbrella was cheap, but the insurance premiums are killing me. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2378 Seriously, I have big galoshes to fill. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2379 Hold this while I dance 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2380 I got it from a Republican. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2381 There's always room for one more. 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
2382 After the flood, I really wanted full coverage. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2383 In place of a golden parachute ... 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2384 I'm a big believer in trickle down economics. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2385 I had hoped for a golden parachute. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2386 You're the only one here. I can't believe no one else showed up. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2387 I have this fear of falling pianos. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2388 Yes, this is our full coverage umbrella policy. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2389 Let's just say my cat was not amused. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
2390 I don't like Pina Coladas. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2391 Why didn't you bring the big umbrella? 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2392 Actually, the updraft makes it surprisingly light. The worst part is sharing it with someone with stinky breath. By the way... 1.2414 0.11802 29 25 1 3
2393 No it's not. Look at those hands, are they small hands? 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
2394 You're right. I am probably over-insured. 1.2400 0.10456 25 20 4 1
2395 See? I told you it would rain. 1.2400 0.10456 25 20 4 1
2396 A smile just wasn't doing it for me 1.2400 0.10456 25 20 4 1
2397 ...... a guy named Noah handed it to me and said, "Take this......... you'll need it." 1.2400 0.10456 25 20 4 1
2398 It came free with the insurance 1.2381 0.11761 21 17 3 1
2399 I got the biggest one just in case it rains "cats and dogs" 1.2368 0.07942 38 30 7 1
2400 With pollsters now forecasting weather, Bill and Sally had to be extra careful with margin of error. 1.2368 0.07942 38 30 7 1
2401 I've been dieting for a while. 1.2353 0.08506 34 27 6 1
2402 .... So it was then I vowed to never lose another umbrella. 1.2353 0.08506 34 27 6 1
2403 I haven't shared a cab in years. 1.2353 0.08506 34 27 6 1
2404 Size has no bearing on whether or not we need rubbers. 1.2353 0.09496 34 28 4 2
2405 One thing you need to know about me... I've never been someone who likes to draw attention to himself. 1.2353 0.08506 34 27 6 1
2406 Sorry, this is only big enough for me and my ego. 1.2353 0.07384 34 26 8 0
2407 When closed, it fits neatly in my briefcase." 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2408 I think it's time we live a little and just walk in the rain. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2409 Actually, transnational, conglomerate business insurance. How'd you guess? 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2410 Come up to my place and I'll show you my galoshes. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2411 I want you to see my wacky, impulsive side. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2412 Now that we are empty nesters, we probably won't be needing this. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2413 It's no longer needed by the Republican Party 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2414 Its an umbrella designed for polygamist. Why do you ask? 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2415 I believe in over insuring. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2416 They say it's not size that matters, but I've always been an over-compensator anyway 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2417 I live upstairs. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2418 I told you this is the year of Huge. 1.2333 0.11430 30 26 1 3
2419 My therapist says I have a Mary Poppins fetish. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2420 I bought it from a kindergarten teacher who moved here from Seattle. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2421 It's the light posts and trees that get in the way. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2422 All this talk about 'manspreading', I just don't get it. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2423 Wish our insurance was this good. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2424 I don't think I can handle a larger coverage plan. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2425 I can understand why you thought you were buying actual insurance, but, no, it's just a guy with a big umbrella. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2426 One way or another, I will cast a larger shadow than my father. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2427 Tell me size doesn't matter now. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2428 You know, I hate to admit this, but sometimes being an eternal pessimist has its upside 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2429 We must have 10 umbrellas and the only one I could find was the deck! 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2430 I found it near the Empire State Building, beside a giant cocktail glass. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2431 it's my way of giving back. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2432 It came with my Supersized Happy Meal. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2433 This date has been supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2434 The diet HAS been working, thanks! 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2435 It's cats and dogs proof 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2436 I'm expecting to see Noah and his gang soon. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2437 I guarantee you there's no problem. I guarantee. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2438 My weather mantra is be prepared. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2439 I was afraid you'd melt. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2440 It's HUGE. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2441 "I thought I was ordering a big policy"! 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2442 I work on Wall Street, they told me to carry a big one. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2443 You never listen to me. "Cats and dogs" is only a figure of speech. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2444 Who will stop the rain? I will stop the rain. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2445 It's for the Cleveland fallout. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2446 It was a gift from our insurance agent when we signed up for his full umbrella coverage! 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2447 I told you, I'm not saying you're fat! 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2448 Yes. I'm thinking of moving to Texas. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2449 First, our insurance agent suggested we get wider coverage on our umbrella policy. That got me thinking... 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2450 It's great now, but try taking it on the subway. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2451 I sell insurance now. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2452 You know what they say about umbrella size. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2453 No, they did not have a matching briefcase... 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2454 This umbrella was made in Texas. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2455 You don't know how many pollutants each raindrop has. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2456 It's for the Trump reign. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2457 Polyamorous fantasies? Me? 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2458 What do you say we try to find a sidewalk ventilation grate. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2459 Yes indeed, our company has you covered. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2460 Same coverage, but cheaper than insurance. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2461 It does cause a bit of a problem at the ballpark' 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2462 I patented the dry pants umbrella... 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2463 I got it at a Trump store. Keep America dry. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2464 "Did I mention my ex-wife was on the heavy side"? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2465 It was a gift for switching insurance companies. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2466 It's the smallest model that qualifies for Uber Umbrella. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2467 I think I've got it covered 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2468 I brought the umbrella, it's your job to throw your coat over the puddle. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2469 Yes it's raining, and yes, I've lost weight... 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2470 Cast a large net, I always say 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2471 Ya, you could say I idolize Mary Poppins. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2472 I'm worried that it says 'Trump.' 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2473 Yes, it keeps me dry, but really I used it for the ambiguity. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2474 One pill makes you larger, and one pill ... 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2475 This new line of introvert umbrellas has been great. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2476 It's like Uber for umbrellas. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2477 Perks of a SuperDelegate. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2478 I'm hoping the Republican Party gets the hint. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2479 Just see it as a dress rehearsal for the England trip 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2480 There are a number of benefits to using a corporate umbrella. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2481 See I told you McDonald's can super size anything. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2482 Have you seen what this stuff does to the finish of a car? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2483 I asked my insurer for umbrella coverage, and it sent me this. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2484 Everyone behind me in my section at Yankee Stadium hates me. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2485 I thought you said you worked for an umbrella company in a metaphorical way 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2486 You should see my house 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2487 I thought I might need it for the Trump presidency 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2488 I feel so much better after losing all that weight. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2489 I told you about my liposuction, didn't I? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2490 And you know what they say about guys with big umbrellas... 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2491 This must be that new GMO rain. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2492 I made it myself. I call it Uberella. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2493 I'm compensating for something. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2494 I bought this before I learned to have a realistic body image. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2495 Well, I do worry about strong winds. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2496 You're going to have to make do with this,I can't make everything bigger. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2497 Pardon me, Miss. Are you sure you have enought insurance? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2498 Yeah, but it's a nightmare in the wind. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2499 So you see, Mrs. Jones, our policy comes with broad coverage. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2500 My agent said I need to have a large umbrella policy. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2501 When you pay $500 for a cabana, you better take the umbrella. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2502 As you can see by signing up for umbrella insurance you get extra coverage. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2503 Yes, I'm compensating for something. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2504 Is overcompensating really so bad? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2505 My insurane agent was trying to make a point. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2506 Technically, this qualifies as an Airbnb. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2507 My mom says this means I still don't have enough sense. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2508 I believe in a large umbrella policy. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2509 I'm in my Pop Art phase. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2510 I was at Woodstock 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2511 My hips aren't that big 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2512 Should we talk about the weather? 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2513 Say what you will, it's good to be part of an umbrella organization. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2514 Does our umbrella coverage include public embarrassment? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2515 On days like this I get sentimental about my time as a paratrooper. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2516 I couldn't resist. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2517 Expensive, yes, but it doubles as a hot tub. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2518 And if it rains hard enough I can flip it over and it turns into a boat. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2519 Or....We could play golf. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2520 Honey, now that we are empty nesters, we should really consider downsizing 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2521 It's always good to be inclusive. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2522 It wasn't this big until I stood next to you 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2523 I have a very large family. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2524 Really tough getting this back in my briefcase. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2525 So, we'll just have to find an Uber car with a sunroof; it's still worth it! 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2526 Does your insurance provide sufficient coverage? 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2527 I call it "Godbrella" 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2528 You laughed when I first bought it but who's got the last laugh now? 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2529 Do you always have to overcompensate? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2530 It's worse than you think. The spec we gave the Defense Acquisition guys was for a cocktail umbrella. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2531 In a stiff wind, it makes me feel like Mary Poppins'. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2532 Singing in the rain doesn't do it for me! 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2533 How many kids do you see yourself having? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2534 Ever since the great cats and dogs flood of '86, I don't take any chances. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2535 It's how I make friends 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2536 I choose to keep my circle small 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2537 You know what they say, "Big umbrella, big feet." 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2538 I donated the house to public radio. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2539 I also own the largest SUV in its class. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2540 I bought it at Shaq's yard sale, why? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2541 It's one of those silly promotions for Viagra. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2542 It doesn't help with cabs but the double decker buses always stop. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2543 It's a freebie from my insurance company 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2544 I've been promoted to Risk Management. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2545 Well, *somebody* has to be the responsible one. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2546 I saved up for a raining day. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2547 The smile wasn't working so I got this instead. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2548 I only promised it wouldn't rain on you; I never said anything about a parade... 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2549 I see they finally made an umbrella proportional to your ego. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2550 You can never be to rich, to skinny, or have too much insurance! 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2551 Were ready in case it rains cats and dogs 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2552 And this is why we needed the umbrella policy. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2553 Intimate, environmentally conscious, and far more cost effective than Uber. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2554 Of course, the key to our own happiness is leaving others out in the rain. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2555 Marty Poppins at your service, ma'am. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2556 Trump left it in my car. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2557 You never know what you'll find in the subway. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2558 I got this after winning the lottery. . . for all those relatives I didn't know I had 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2559 No, you hold it! 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2560 I work for Travelers Insurance. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2561 I miss your dry sense of humor. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2562 ...and I don't usually speak poorly of your family Linda, but I still think your brother is compensating for something with that new truck... 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2563 This is just the prototype, the finished Poppins 2000 will be come in a variety of colors. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2564 Some do it with cars others with boats. I find that umbrellas are a far more practical way to over compensate 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2565 Be assured, there's no gap in my umbrella coverage 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2566 I agree, Susan. The recent rise in shady umbrella corporations is becoming a large-scale problem. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2567 It compensates for my little hands. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2568 In no way is this a metaphor for our marriage. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2569 You've heard 'Never shop for groceries when you're hungry'? Well, the same goes for rain gear in a thunderstorm. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2570 It keeps me dry, but tap dancing is out of the question. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2571 Clearly, it also repels women. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2572 With a strong gust, I can do a Mary Poppins. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2573 Yes, but it was just right before the kids all left home. 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2574 What color is your parachute? 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2575 Mr. Trump will be bringing so many people under one of these fantastic umbrellas. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2576 You do care about my hair-do 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2577 I come from a large family 1.2333 0.07854 30 23 7 0
2578 I'm finding there are some drawbacks to the sharing economy. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2579 Microphobia my entire life. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2580 You know, it does take HUGE, strong hands to hold up such a large umbrella. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2581 How did you know I am an insurance salesman? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
2582 I could go for a wet one. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
2583 Actually, I'm an introvert but it was such a good deal, I couldn't pass it up. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
2584 I don't want to be dry. I want to be an internet meme. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
2585 My insurance agent sold it to me... 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
2586 Does this look too macho? 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
2587 I guess I have lost a little weight. 1.2286 0.08287 35 28 6 1
2588 Yes- I actually would melt. 1.2286 0.09245 35 29 4 2
2589 I have big hands too. 1.2286 0.09245 35 29 4 2
2590 When it floods we can use it as a boat! 1.2286 0.07201 35 27 8 0
2591 I got at a patio furniture sale. 1.2286 0.07201 35 27 8 0
2592 I see it as a cost-free way of maximizing my real-estate holdings. 1.2286 0.08287 35 28 6 1
2593 But it's STILL always me that ends up getting wet. 1.2273 0.07170 44 35 8 1
2594 Everything is yuge this year. 1.2273 0.11266 22 18 3 1
2595 I was expecting more rain AND a larger crowd. 1.2273 0.11266 22 18 3 1
2596 I promised to love, honor and always have you covered. 1.2258 0.10064 31 26 3 2
2597 They call this a small at McDonalds. 1.2258 0.07634 31 24 7 0
2598 I picked this up on Kickstarter. 1.2258 0.10064 31 26 3 2
2599 It's a good thing I packed the spare in my brief case. Never know with this weather. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2600 Yes Mary, size does matter. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2601 It's a big enough umbrella, but you're still all wet 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2602 I'm afraid of cats AND dogs. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2603 I was raised Mormon. 1.2258 0.10064 31 26 3 2
2604 Where did they all go? 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2605 My ex-wife had a big head. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2606 I have a very generous umbrella policy 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2607 It's an all-inclusive umbrella. 1.2258 0.10064 31 26 3 2
2608 It's for when it rains cats and dogs. 1.2258 0.07634 31 24 7 0
2609 I got it from Trump Tower. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2610 Obama Care 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2611 This is nothing. You should see my rainy day fund. 1.2258 0.07634 31 24 7 0
2612 This ought to give us some sidewalk space. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2613 ... plus it repels bike messengers. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2614 I found it in a cab. n 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2615 don't complain about me not putting a roof over your head 1.2258 0.10064 31 26 3 2
2616 Don't ask where I kept this. 1.2258 0.07634 31 24 7 0
2617 I know, but it's one way we can assert some personal space. 1.2258 0.07634 31 24 7 0
2618 If you have an inkling as to what this might be compensating for, please do tell. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2619 The audit says we have a large overhead. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2620 Into my life a LOT of rain falls. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2621 Sure it may seem big now, but what if we want a family? 1.2258 0.07634 31 24 7 0
2622 You didn't bring your handbag? This certainly isn't going to fit in my briefcase. 1.2258 0.11081 31 27 1 3
2623 It's the latest thing, a golf umbrella that covers the green. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2624 It sure comes in handy but, the mini storage bill is a bitch. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2625 I got it at Big Lots. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2626 So... this was your grand scheme in saving for a rainy day? 1.2258 0.10064 31 26 3 2
2627 No, I don't work in insurance. Why would you think that? 1.2258 0.07634 31 24 7 0
2628 It's not a problem...I have big hands. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2629 You see, size does count. 1.2258 0.07634 31 24 7 0
2630 Got it from "Survivalist". It doubles as a lifeboat. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2631 I got it at a Republican National Committee auction. They called it their 'big tent'. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
2632 In the insurance business, umbrella policies rule! 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
2633 working in insurance has taught me a thing or two about coverage 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
2634 Are you sure this is just about climate change? 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
2635 I've saved it for a rainy day. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
2636 It was ordered for the Republican Party but they decided to go in a different direction. 1.2222 0.07027 45 36 8 1
2637 I leave it up because folded it's too heavy to carry. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
2638 This helped me overcome my superstition of opening umbrellas indoors. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
2639 I wanted to be prepared in case it never stops raining. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
2640 I didn't read the fine print in the two-for-one offer on golf umbrellas. 1.2222 0.08078 36 29 6 1
2641 That's the down-side of online shopping, you can never be sure you're going to get the right size. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
2642 Turns out the Saudi prince self-insures, but he gave me his spare umbrella for my trouble. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
2643 AND 100%SPF protection. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
2644 It's hell to get on an airplane. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
2645 Iguess that's what they meant by you're covered. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
2646 I used to be a lot heavier! 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
2647 Fo' drizzle. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
2648 Here, can you hold this for a sec? 1.2188 0.08677 32 26 5 1
2649 I'm glad we added the umbrella policy. 1.2188 0.07425 32 25 7 0
2650 I'm a very social person. 1.2188 0.07425 32 25 7 0
2651 You could just walk around it. 1.2188 0.07425 32 25 7 0
2652 I bought it on my trip to Texas. 1.2188 0.07425 32 25 7 0
2653 Rain, no, I use this for sun block. 1.2188 0.08677 32 26 5 1
2654 My job requires that I cover a lot of ground. 1.2188 0.08677 32 26 5 1
2655 Rain, yes, rain and high wind not so much. 1.2188 0.09770 32 27 3 2
2656 That diet worked too well 1.2188 0.08677 32 26 5 1
2657 I guess the Chess Club is not coming. 1.2188 0.09770 32 27 3 2
2658 In case of flooding it also serves as a boat. 1.2188 0.09770 32 27 3 2
2659 It's the minivan of umbrellas. 1.2188 0.08677 32 26 5 1
2660 I'm listing the extra room on airbnb. 1.2188 0.08677 32 26 5 1
2661 I'm attempting to attract an entourage. 1.2188 0.07425 32 25 7 0
2662 So much for a golden parachute, eh? 1.2188 0.09770 32 27 3 2
2663 I’m throwing a bone to Caption Contest entrants who never tire of jokes about penis size. 1.2174 0.10810 23 19 3 1
2664 In the army it covered an entire platoon. 1.2174 0.10810 23 19 3 1
2665 I hope you like dogs because I have twelve. 1.2174 0.08794 23 18 5 0
2666 I'm an undercover agent for the weather bureau. 1.2162 0.07880 37 30 6 1
2667 Yes, a Hummer limo--how'd you guess? 1.2162 0.07880 37 30 6 1
2668 I used to have a parade. 1.2162 0.07880 37 30 6 1
2669 It made me realize that Mary Poppins and Maury Povitch share the same initials ... and I started to question if I really was the father of my children. 1.2162 0.07880 37 30 6 1
2670 I had it made for the Republican convention but I'm thinking I won't be using it. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2671 And if it floods, she makes a pretty fair boat. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2672 It's from the Mary Poppins 'supersonic' collection. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2673 i'm a community organizer. 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2674 It's a gift from my insurance agent. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2675 Everyone at work has been congratulating both of us on our weight loss. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2676 Who said chivalry was dead? 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2677 Now that we're empty nesters I guess it's time we downsize our umbrella. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2678 Let it now rain cats and dogs. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2679 I finally have a reason to tell people why my left arm is so muscular that doesn't shed light on my frequent masturbating. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2680 Funny you should ask; my family is Mormon..... 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2681 You can pay me by the hour, or by the shower. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2682 It's hard to act like a helpful citizen and still work under cover. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2683 How much do you think we can rent this space for? 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2684 I guess the rumors were true. You really don't know how to get a girl wet. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2685 Big enough for you now? 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2686 I'm telling you, climate change is for real. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2687 don't you think this is a bit too elitist? 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2688 Excuse me, but would you mind if I kept you dry? 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2689 Oh, it's shoe size it correlates with ? 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2690 I'm too absorbent. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2691 Honey, we're not at the golf course.. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2692 I plan to take my "Jumbrella" to Shark Tank. Should be a big winner in sales. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2693 Good day Ms. Jones. We have one more pick up to make then we'll be on our way. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2694 It's such a relief to retire my parka for the season. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2695 It keeps my Armani raincoat dry. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2696 So, in general, does that about cover it? 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2697 But this is our umbrella policy. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2698 For the last time, it's from the Trump Collection, and size is properly called Yuuuuge. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2699 They said there wasn't an umbrella big enough to fit my ego under. They say a lot of things they know nothing about. 1.2143 0.08018 42 35 5 2
2700 Yes, I ordered it online. Why? 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2701 Were you expecting some others? 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2702 I got it during Sandy. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2703 I can do laps in it too. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2704 I thought we would grow into it. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2705 Yes, I am aquaphobic. Why do you ask? 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2706 It's given me more friends than Facebook. 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2707 No one's going to rain on *my* parade. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2708 the policy was to good to turn down 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2709 Alice, you have No clue what people say about men with small umbrellas. 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2710 "Rain completes me." . 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2711 Does this mean you'll sing louder? 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2712 It's the new Trump umbrella -- amazing, yooodge, but I would've expected a larger handle. 1.2143 0.11905 28 25 0 3
2713 The Jolly Green Giant just polished off his piña colada 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2714 My agent said I should increase my umbrella coverage. 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2715 I'm usually quite popular. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2716 Killer app!" "Yeah. Even better than Flashlight. 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
2717 The umbrella's a metaphor, I actually sell insurance. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2718 We should consider downsizing now that the kids are out of strollers. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2719 It also provides protection against catastrophic losses! 1.2143 0.07258 42 34 7 1
2720 Umbrella policy! recommended by my insurance guy. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
2721 I want a family. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2722 Pulled this from my golf bag when I saw the forecast. You should see my putter. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
2723 I also use it as a Cellphone Tower and WIFI Router 1.2128 0.06757 47 38 8 1
2724 You're gonna need your own cab. 1.2121 0.08436 33 27 5 1
2725 How do you like it? It's a genuine Paul Bunyan. 1.2121 0.08436 33 27 5 1
2726 What do you mean that I am compensating for my tiny hands by buying something yuge? 1.2121 0.09492 33 28 3 2
2727 They said there was going to be a really big storm. 1.2121 0.08436 33 27 5 1
2728 Why yes, I am for universal health coverage. 1.2121 0.08436 33 27 5 1
2729 I also bought the air rights. 1.2121 0.08436 33 27 5 1
2730 I only work with Christo during inclement weather 1.2121 0.08436 33 27 5 1
2731 I get that you just got a job in the CIA, but I don't think this is what your boss meant by 'undercover.' 1.2121 0.09492 33 28 3 2
2732 I hate the way your mother is telling us that she wants to become a grandmother. 1.2121 0.09492 33 28 3 2
2733 Singing in the rain was so last century. Now I'm all about staying extra dry and just humming a little. 1.2121 0.09492 33 28 3 2
2734 You should see my beach umbrella! 1.2121 0.07227 33 26 7 0
2735 I'm a former Fundamentalist Mormon. 1.2105 0.09359 38 33 2 3
2736 I got it at the GOP outlet sale. They don't need big umbrellas anymore. 1.2093 0.07105 43 35 7 1
2737 I'm an English man,living in New York 1.2083 0.06630 48 39 8 1
2738 This Trump's my old one. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
2739 I knew it was going to rain this bad today. Trump wins and even God cries a bit. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
2740 I mean generally speaking, we are dry... 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
2741 So you think the umbrella I offer has way too much coverage? 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
2742 The circus will never be the same without you! 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
2743 You would not believe how selfish I was in the past. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
2744 Like I always say, carpooling is the lazy man's umbrella-pooling. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2745 I have to keep it in a parking garage. 1.2069 0.10386 29 25 2 2
2746 I hope this one's big enough for you. 1.2069 0.10386 29 25 2 2
2747 We midgets have a big advantage when it comes to rain. 1.2069 0.10386 29 25 2 2
2748 I'd love to have you move in, but where? 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2749 No, I don't know what they say about a man who carries a large umbrella. 1.2069 0.10386 29 25 2 2
2750 It came in a small package. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2751 Well, we'll just have to trade-in the Mini Cooper! 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2752 This is just in case it really starts raining cats and dogs. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2753 This is good enough for a little spritz, but what will I do if it REALLY starts to rain? 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2754 What do you do with it when it stops raining? 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2755 I thought we could pick up a monumentally large pizza. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2756 (And have you noticed the size of my hands?) 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2757 I just don't get why you need such a big briefcase. 1.2069 0.10386 29 25 2 2
2758 It's good with the rain, bad with the ever increasing sense of isolation. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2759 Wow, it REALLY has been a long time since we took a walk in the rain, isn't it? You'd just started this diet, I recall... 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2760 And it's rent controlled with dedicated parking tube. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2761 My other girlfriends fit under here too, is that a problem? 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2762 My insurance agent recommended an umbrella policy. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2763 Yes, big with the umbrella, big with the galoshes. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2764 I come from a big family of hydrophobics... 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2765 I'm telling you, go with the umbrella policy... 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2766 Ever since I saw Jaws I've been afraid of the water. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2767 Did we get the time right for the flash mob in the rain? 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2768 I bought this umbrella in Texas. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2769 I only worry about the wind. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2770 Dad hounded me constantly about always carrying a plenty of protection. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2771 Thank you for choosing Uber Uber. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2772 Must have packed my wives' umbrella by mistake. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2773 I didn't buy this umbrella just for looks. I got it so we don't have to huddle together under a small one. I guess it is just for looks, then. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2774 I like to be well endowed up top. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2775 Should we have kids? 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2776 It's the Insurance version of a Golden Parachute. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2777 Sir, How in the hell do you plan to get that thing on the bus? 1.2069 0.10386 29 25 2 2
2778 Could be trouble with Uber. Collapse button is stuck. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2779 This isn't just any big umbrella, this is the El Niño 700! 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2780 Compensating for something? 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2781 I got tired of wet feet. 1.2069 0.10386 29 25 2 2
2782 It's the one good product Trump sells. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2783 The Penguin sends his regrets. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2784 This fall, everything's gonna be HUGE. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2785 I thought you were bringing your family! 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2786 The Republicans didn't need it anymore. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2787 It's your turn. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2788 You should see the extra-large. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2789 My insurance guy said I should get this. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2790 Okay on the McMansion. But, the McBrella? 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2791 Sir Francis Drake did not have this... 1.2069 0.11511 29 26 0 3
2792 We could go to dinner, but I'm afraid someone will mistake are umbrella for a table. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2793 From my cold, wet hands. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
2794 Walk softly but carry a big umbrella, I always say. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2795 Why, yes, I sell insurance; how did you know? 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
2796 It's a benefit I provide for my employees. They all decided to take the bus today. 1.2069 0.10