Contest #518


Cartoon

518


Name Value
Submission deadline -
Voting started 2016-04-18
Voting ended -
Finalists announced -
Magazine(s) announcing finalists issued 2016-05-01 (estimated)
Number of captions 4509
Number of responses 248180
Number of participants 7429


Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 This saddest part is he's going in the wrong direction. 1.7902 0.05124 224 94 83 47
1 It's annoying until the vultures land. Then it's awesome for 5 minutes. 1.7860 0.05369 229 105 68 56
2 Let it go, Dad—it’s just a quarter. 1.7486 0.05814 179 82 60 37
3 Isn't this the same guy who got shipwrecked in our wading pool? 1.7475 0.07777 99 45 34 20
4 That's Lawrence of Suburbia. 1.7325 0.06154 157 73 53 31
5 And if he survives, the co-op board runs a credit check. 1.7071 0.06531 140 68 45 27
6 Well - looks like at least one child was left behind. 1.7055 0.06236 146 69 51 26
7 Well, they didn't specify who would come if we built it. 1.6967 0.06875 122 59 41 22
8 We're going to need a bigger scooper 1.6881 0.06982 109 51 41 17
9 His parents never picked him up. 1.6829 0.06861 123 61 40 22
10 Of all the sandboxes, on all the roofs, in all the world, he crawls into mine. 1.6746 0.06745 126 63 41 22
11 My dad's second childhood is really ruining my first. 1.6667 0.06797 123 62 40 21
12 Should we tell him we found his car keys 2 hours ago? 1.6667 0.07285 102 50 36 16
13 He's been off the Camels for a week now. 1.6643 0.06193 143 71 49 23
14 Are we in his mirage, or is he in our sandbox? 1.6579 0.07247 114 60 33 21
15 It's post traumatic sandbox disorder. I had it in kindergarten. 1.6277 0.08282 94 54 21 19
16 I'm just saying... yesterday there were two guys and this one was a lot thinner. 1.6190 0.07459 105 58 29 18
17 And he refuses to ask for directions. 1.6162 0.06374 99 46 45 8
18 Of all the sandboxes in all the towns in all the world, he crawls into ours. 1.6067 0.07766 89 48 28 13
19 Of all the sandboxes, in all of the towns, he crawls into mine. 1.6023 0.07501 88 46 31 11
20 So that's adulthood. 1.6000 0.07672 80 41 30 9
21 Let's live with Mom. 1.6000 0.07545 90 48 30 12
22 I think he lost more than his contact lens. 1.5955 0.07617 89 48 29 12
23 Mom took the beach house in the divorce 1.5955 0.07617 89 48 29 12
24 I call him "Lawrence of Astoria." 1.5900 0.06831 100 52 37 11
25 No use sharing your bucket with him. It's clear he's beyond the pail. 1.5833 0.08504 84 50 19 15
26 I cleaned up after the cat; you clean up after Mr. Phillips. 1.5823 0.08566 79 46 20 13
27 But what if it's not a metaphor? 1.5814 0.08012 86 49 24 13
28 He also scored low on "fighting his way out of a paper bag". 1.5811 0.08389 74 41 23 10
29 I know where Mom hid his cigarettes, but I'm not tellin'. 1.5789 0.08638 76 44 20 12
30 I guess we'll have to bury him deeper. 1.5765 0.08431 85 51 19 15
31 Looks like you were right - this could be a good place for a lemonade stand. 1.5753 0.08257 73 40 24 9
32 The cat caught on a lot faster. 1.5733 0.08093 75 41 25 9
33 When is adult sand over? 1.5733 0.07867 75 40 27 8
34 We really need a gated sandbox. 1.5714 0.07261 77 39 32 6
35 Last time, I lured him out with a Martini. 1.5698 0.07677 86 48 27 11
36 "Think maybe he lost his marbles?' 1.5679 0.08596 81 49 18 14
37 He would think more clearly outside the box. 1.5658 0.08447 76 44 21 11
38 Grown-ups can take the fun out of pretty much anything. 1.5652 0.08631 69 39 21 9
39 I'm thinking it's mom's turn to scoop the box. 1.5606 0.08936 66 38 19 9
40 Long time, no sea. 1.5588 0.07665 68 35 28 5
41 Don't fall for it. He just wants your juice box. 1.5570 0.08401 79 47 20 12
42 He'll NEVER ask for directions. 1.5568 0.07019 88 47 33 8
43 Same guy who nearly drowned in my wading pool. 1.5541 0.08636 74 44 19 11
44 Well, actually, I've accepted it. But mother and the cat are livid. 1.5541 0.09054 74 46 15 13
45 Mom's right, we need a cover for this thing. 1.5538 0.08779 65 37 20 8
46 I wish he'd think outside the box. 1.5526 0.09252 76 49 12 15
47 Don't say anything. He's our ride home. 1.5526 0.07812 76 42 26 8
48 He works hard. And he plays hard. 1.5500 0.08325 80 48 20 12
49 Where are his parents? 1.5479 0.08512 73 43 20 10
50 We're ok unless he starts to meow. 1.5479 0.08053 73 41 24 8
51 This explains the dead horse in the lobby. 1.5479 0.08512 73 43 20 10
52 Boy, he sure looks different from his playdate.com profile. 1.5469 0.08889 64 37 19 8
53 Your Dad knows it's just a penny, right? 1.5429 0.08059 70 39 24 7
54 It's the amenities that makes this building so great. 1.5417 0.08608 72 43 19 10
55 Do you think someone should tell him his kid left an hour ago? 1.5410 0.09225 61 36 17 8
56 My therapist says the grains of sand represent the ephemeral nature of acquisition, but Mom just calls him a loser. 1.5405 0.08857 74 46 16 12
57 It's rent controlled so he's held onto it. 1.5405 0.07742 74 41 26 7
58 He hasn't been the same since we sold our beach house. 1.5395 0.08259 76 45 21 10
59 After adult coloring books, sandboxes were the next logical step. 1.5395 0.07823 76 43 25 8
60 He says he's Lawrence of Astoria. 1.5385 0.08693 78 49 16 13
61 He won't leave. It's rent stabilized. 1.5352 0.08933 71 44 16 11
62 I'm thinking what we scooped out yesterday may not have been from a giant cat. 1.5352 0.08471 71 42 20 9
63 Harold and Judy from 6D here. We'd like our skylight back. 1.5342 0.07823 73 41 25 7
64 He's got to learn to think outside the box. 1.5323 0.09117 62 37 17 8
65 He can't think outside the box. 1.5312 0.08900 64 38 18 8
66 We should have called ahead for a reservation. 1.5286 0.07808 70 39 25 6
67 Should we tell him about the pool? 1.5278 0.07394 72 39 28 5
68 Can we move this along, sir? We've booked for 9:30. 1.5238 0.08423 63 36 21 6
69 Do you want to tell him it's kitty litter or should I? 1.5231 0.08800 65 39 18 8
70 Mister, you're not allowed to play here if you don't live in the building. 1.5231 0.09069 65 40 16 9
71 It’s been three days - how much can a contact lens cost? 1.5224 0.08601 67 40 19 8
72 We'll put the lemonade stand here. 1.5205 0.07583 73 41 26 6
73 It's true! Without his phone he really is lost! 1.5205 0.08069 73 43 22 8
74 At least it's only every other weekend. 1.5195 0.07975 77 46 22 9
75 I thought he was YOUR imaginary friend. 1.5179 0.09532 56 34 15 7
76 Ive tried everything, but I can't get him to think outside the box. 1.5172 0.09602 58 36 14 8
77 He thinks he sees an affordable two-bedroom, but it's only a mirage. 1.5172 0.08950 58 34 18 6
78 If we give him water, he'll never learn how to get it for himself. 1.5161 0.08209 62 35 22 5
79 Should we tell him the phone's in his back pocket? 1.5156 0.08907 64 39 17 8
80 In this experiment, I buried the subject's smart phone in the sand. He has not been able to check his texts or e-mails for almost 35 minutes now. 1.5156 0.09181 64 40 15 9
81 He says he won't leave 'till he's found his inner child. 1.5143 0.08074 70 41 22 7
82 Apparently he can't even think in the box. 1.5139 0.08390 72 44 19 9
83 Just buy a new contact lens already! 1.5085 0.09479 59 37 14 8
84 Apparently, we didn't bury him deep enough. 1.5079 0.09830 63 42 10 11
85 Let's play outside the box today. 1.5077 0.09588 65 43 11 11
86 The marbles he lost can't be found. 1.5072 0.08910 69 44 15 10
87 You hit him with the bucket and I'll bury him. 1.5000 0.09449 64 42 12 10
88 Why does he keep saying "oil futures"? 1.5000 0.09126 62 39 15 8
89 If he dies can I bury him? 1.5000 0.09449 64 42 12 10
90 Well, will you look what the cat dragged in. 1.5000 0.08250 58 33 21 4
91 Darn, he hasn't really made much progress since yesterday. 1.5000 0.09605 58 37 13 8
92 Your cat looks sick. 1.4951 0.07284 103 67 21 15
93 Shall we offer the pail and shovel or just tell him his keys are right there on the sidewalk? 1.4923 0.09836 65 45 8 12
94 April fool, Dad! I don’t even wear contacts. 1.4921 0.09015 63 40 15 8
95 He said he lost his keys in there but I think he's lost his marbles 1.4918 0.08628 61 37 18 6
96 Uh, my dad goes a little overboard in the retelling of the Passover story. 1.4918 0.08305 61 36 20 5
97 Lawrence of Suburbia. 1.4918 0.07970 61 35 22 4
98 How long is this guy's recess? 1.4918 0.08628 61 37 18 6
99 He still can't think outside the box. 1.4918 0.08628 61 37 18 6
100 I guess it wasn't cats peeing in the sandbox after all. 1.4915 0.10077 59 40 9 10
101 I told you they were too big to have come from a cat. 1.4912 0.10051 57 38 10 9
102 Great. It's the "Occupy Sandbox" movement. 1.4912 0.09068 57 35 16 6
103 The sands of time can be so cruel. 1.4912 0.08715 57 34 18 5
104 Is it time to change his sand? 1.4909 0.08942 55 33 17 5
105 Though I'm usually against animal testing, I think we should have a cat test the kitty litter. 1.4909 0.09665 55 35 13 7
106 Microclimate change. 1.4906 0.09184 53 32 16 5
107 They say he's lost his marbles. 1.4906 0.08780 53 31 18 4
108 He's searching for a grain of truth. 1.4906 0.08780 53 31 18 4
109 It all started with those adult coloring books. 1.4894 0.10912 47 31 9 7
110 It's like an Infinity Pool, only more desperate. 1.4844 0.08331 64 39 19 6
111 I just changed my mind about wanting to grow up. 1.4844 0.09181 64 42 13 9
112 The short answer is 'peyote.' 1.4839 0.09409 62 41 12 9
113 He's looking for his offshore account. 1.4839 0.08829 62 39 16 7
114 Unsure which public restrooms to use, straight males now opting for rooftop litter boxes. Story at 11. 1.4833 0.09355 60 39 13 8
115 He always refuses to ask directions! 1.4828 0.08606 58 35 18 5
116 If this your Dad after watching 'Lawrence of Arabia,' I hope he never sees 'Fifty Shades of Grey.' 1.4828 0.09602 58 38 12 8
117 He's harmless, but keep an eye on your juice box. 1.4828 0.08606 58 35 18 5
118 He's auditioning for 'Survivor: Lower East Side'. 1.4828 0.08606 58 35 18 5
119 For once I'd like recess without the drama. 1.4828 0.07871 58 33 22 3
120 I wish I had his imagination. 1.4828 0.09282 58 37 14 7
121 Should we give him back his glasses? 1.4821 0.09185 56 35 15 6
122 Well, at least he buried it. 1.4821 0.10190 56 38 9 9
123 He never really got over losing Wilson 1.4821 0.10504 56 39 7 10
124 Maybe we should tell him about the "find your IPhone" feature 1.4815 0.10149 54 36 10 8
125 So, that's why the pigeons are circling. 1.4808 0.09309 52 32 15 5
126 Poor guy just can't think outside of the box... 1.4808 0.10454 52 35 9 8
127 Dad takes his telling of the Passover story very seriously. 1.4808 0.09309 52 32 15 5
128 We're gonna need a bigger box 1.4800 0.09579 50 31 14 5
129 Mom said he wouldn't put the seat down. 1.4792 0.10731 48 32 9 7
130 So, do we get involved or just find somewhere else to play? 1.4737 0.08709 57 35 17 5
131 He loves working at the granular level. 1.4737 0.07957 57 33 21 3
132 I don't know. The plaque says, 'Wall Street, 2008'. 1.4737 0.09401 57 37 13 7
133 This installation would look better at MoMA. 1.4727 0.08550 55 33 18 4
134 He's adamant he ordered a small dessert, but that's the problem with predictive text 1.4727 0.10002 55 37 10 8
135 That's why I don't wear contact lenses. 1.4727 0.08935 55 34 16 5
136 Start worrying if he meows. 1.4727 0.08550 55 33 18 4
137 Drat, he's no further than he was yesterday. 1.4727 0.08550 55 33 18 4
138 Mom said if he doesn't go, we can't let him back inside. 1.4727 0.09659 55 36 12 7
139 You really need to screen your playdates better. 1.4727 0.08935 55 34 16 5
140 Let's update his GPS. 1.4727 0.07722 55 31 22 2
141 Now we wait for the cement to harden. 1.4727 0.08146 55 32 20 3
142 Wasn't he going the other way yesterday? 1.4717 0.07902 53 30 21 2
143 I switched his pot with catnip. 1.4694 0.09716 49 31 13 5
144 I'm always confused. Performance or installation? 1.4667 0.09847 45 28 13 4
145 Don't worry, he's just a mirage. 1.4667 0.09041 60 39 14 7
146 When a Zen garden isn't so Zen 1.4667 0.10825 45 30 9 6
147 Maybe he'll let us bury him. 1.4655 0.08941 58 37 15 6
148 Okay maybe we should tell him where his keys are. 1.4643 0.09522 56 37 12 7
149 He's just not thinking outside the box. 1.4643 0.09522 56 37 12 7
150 'Staycation' isn't going so well. 1.4643 0.08814 56 35 16 5
151 Talk about a first world problem. 1.4643 0.09522 56 37 12 7
152 The 'infinity desert' also has a heat lamp option, for extra despair. 1.4643 0.08814 56 35 16 5
153 He said that he spent the happiest years of his life in this place and he wants to be buried here. 1.4630 0.08652 54 33 17 4
154 I hope that's clumping. 1.4630 0.10140 54 37 9 8
155 I'd say he doesn't play well with others. 1.4630 0.09425 54 35 13 6
156 Maybe he's an out-of-work archeologist. 1.4630 0.09047 54 34 15 5
157 I hope that is clumping litter. 1.4630 0.09425 54 35 13 6
158 Okay Dad, climate change is real. I get it. 1.4630 0.09047 54 34 15 5
159 He is absolutely unable to think outside the box. 1.4630 0.09789 54 36 11 7
160 Let’s wait; he’s almost there. 1.4630 0.08239 54 32 19 3
161 He won't get far. 1.4615 0.09694 52 34 12 6
162 Sorry no bathroom in this unit, but it does come with a rooftop litter box. 1.4615 0.10076 52 35 10 7
163 I think he’s looking for his marbles. 1.4615 0.08447 52 31 18 3
164 It's not the heat, it's the stupidity. 1.4615 0.09297 52 33 14 5
165 Should we card him? He doesn't look under 6 to me. 1.4615 0.09297 52 33 14 5
166 Forty years later and he still hasn't come in from recess. Legendary. 1.4615 0.11527 39 26 8 5
167 I guess one person's sandbox is another person's desert. 1.4600 0.09984 50 33 11 6
168 I hate to tell him the oasis is the other way. 1.4600 0.10384 50 34 9 7
169 Ah, looking for the grain of truth. 1.4600 0.10384 50 34 9 7
170 He'll never make it. 1.4600 0.09566 50 32 13 5
171 I'm not so sure about these new public restrooms... 1.4583 0.09856 48 31 12 5
172 Maybe we should tell him to think outside the box. 1.4583 0.09856 48 31 12 5
173 The last stage of the co-op board approval process, he's trying to buy 3A. 1.4583 0.09856 48 31 12 5
174 He washed up on the Upper East Side 1.4561 0.09049 57 37 14 6
175 He must think he's Lawrence of Suburbia 1.4545 0.09291 55 36 13 6
176 I'm not sure that this is what was meant by "make the refugees feel at home" 1.4545 0.12379 33 22 7 4
177 I don't think he ever really got over the loss of "Wilson." 1.4545 0.08921 55 35 15 5
178 We really are getting the full New York experience at this Airbnb. 1.4545 0.09997 44 28 12 4
179 Dad takes the fun out of everything. 1.4545 0.10513 44 29 10 5
180 No, you tell him his keys are in your bucket! 1.4528 0.09549 53 35 12 6
181 He's practicing for climate change. 1.4528 0.08757 53 33 16 4
182 Should we bring him a doctor or a camel? 1.4516 0.12127 31 20 8 3
183 If we give him water we’re enablers. 1.4510 0.09420 51 33 13 5
184 Life's a beach. 1.4510 0.09420 51 33 13 5
185 Mom says he's preparing for global warming. 1.4510 0.08994 51 32 15 4
186 It's evident that he can't think outside the box. 1.4500 0.08709 60 39 15 6
187 Daddy, I also might have lost it on that other roof there... 1.4490 0.08778 49 30 16 3
188 He's a rescue dad. 1.4490 0.09250 49 31 14 4
189 I'm inclined not to tell the search party. 1.4490 0.09698 49 32 12 5
190 Survivor has really cut its budget this year. 1.4490 0.09698 49 32 12 5
191 You took him in, you do the scoop. 1.4490 0.09250 49 31 14 4
192 Be sure to call as soon as you get there. 1.4468 0.09526 47 30 13 4
193 Yes, but is it Art? 1.4468 0.10452 47 32 9 6
194 Be patient--he's nearly there. 1.4468 0.09526 47 30 13 4
195 This guy is taking forever. 1.4468 0.09999 47 31 11 5
196 Should we tell him we already found the ring? 1.4468 0.09027 47 29 15 3
197 It's punishment from his editor... he spelled "dessert" with only one "s." 1.4444 0.10804 45 31 8 6
198 The hard part was figuring out how to keep the sand moving. 1.4444 0.09824 45 29 12 4
199 I wonder if he knows that's a litter box? 1.4444 0.10326 45 30 10 5
200 Word on the street is he's been bounced from every other box in town. 1.4444 0.09824 45 29 12 4
201 Hey, Mister. You're in the wrong cartoon. This is our sandbox. 1.4444 0.10326 45 30 10 5
202 I'll bet unemployed Archaeologist. 1.4423 0.08862 52 33 15 4
203 I wonder what his inner child thinks of his outer adult. 1.4423 0.09278 52 34 13 5
204 He's training for climate change. 1.4419 0.10150 43 28 11 4
205 This is exactly why I stopped wearing contact lenses. 1.4400 0.09107 50 32 14 4
206 First Mrs. Billingsley's cat, now this. We need a rake. 1.4400 0.10365 50 35 8 7
207 If you give him water now you'll just encourage him. 1.4400 0.08647 50 31 16 3
208 I see what you mean. He looks miserable; we should switch back to the clumping litter. 1.4400 0.10365 50 35 8 7
209 I hope that's not us 50 years from now. 1.4400 0.09963 50 34 10 6
210 Show me a hotter, grittier performance artist working today. 1.4400 0.08647 50 31 16 3
211 I'm just glad he's not training for Naked and Afraid. 1.4400 0.09545 50 33 12 5
212 No, YOU tell him his time is up. 1.4400 0.09107 50 32 14 4
213 The sad thing is, he thought he'd asked for dessert. 1.4400 0.08647 50 31 16 3
214 I solemnly swear to never grow up. 1.4390 0.10505 41 27 10 4
215 Our other amenity is a resistance pool. 1.4375 0.09371 48 31 13 4
216 Yeah, I reserved the box but I think this guy knows somebody. 1.4375 0.08372 48 29 17 2
217 First they take our coloring books, now our sandboxes. 1.4375 0.09833 48 32 11 5
218 He's got to start thinking outside the box. 1.4364 0.09627 55 38 10 7
219 Remember the good old days when all we worried about were cats? 1.4359 0.10256 39 25 11 3
220 Honestly, I don't mind if dad thinks he's a cat. It's the clean-up I'm having a problem with. 1.4348 0.10610 46 32 8 6
221 Performance art pisses me off. 1.4348 0.11056 46 33 6 7
222 Maybe we should think outside the box. 1.4348 0.09143 46 29 14 3
223 Mom won't let you keep him unless he is house-trained. 1.4348 0.10610 46 32 8 6
224 I want the cat back. 1.4348 0.09657 46 30 12 4
225 I told him to cross at night, but did he listen? 1.4348 0.09657 46 30 12 4
226 Should we tell him that's the litter box? 1.4348 0.09657 46 30 12 4
227 He thinks he's in the desert on a horse with no name. 1.4348 0.09143 46 29 14 3
228 Should I tell him there's a Starbucks across the street? 1.4348 0.08598 46 28 16 2
229 Poor guy has been on a timeout since the 70s. 1.4348 0.09657 46 30 12 4
230 I thought he was taking us out for a little dessert. 1.4348 0.10145 46 31 10 5
231 I stand corrected, he really did mean desert sampler. 1.4348 0.10145 46 31 10 5
232 Not sure this beachfront timeshare is working out. 1.4348 0.09657 46 30 12 4
233 That cat looks like your dad. 1.4348 0.09657 46 30 12 4
234 Hey mister - can we bury you? 1.4348 0.09657 46 30 12 4
235 I hope he finds him. He was a very nice little boy. 1.4348 0.10610 46 32 8 6
236 If we give him water he'll never leave. 1.4340 0.08307 53 33 17 3
237 I wish he'd go back to the StairMaster. 1.4324 0.10641 37 24 10 3
238 I just hope I outgrow this quicker than he has. 1.4318 0.09967 44 29 11 4
239 He's your typical method actor about to do a bottled water commercial. 1.4286 0.09671 49 33 11 5
240 ...at least it's a dry heat... 1.4286 0.08000 56 35 18 3
241 His "Survivor" audition is tomorrow. 1.4286 0.09221 49 32 13 4
242 He said his name's Robinson something. 1.4286 0.09725 42 27 12 3
243 Lawrence of Albany 1.4286 0.08748 49 31 15 3
244 Hey buddy, you gonna let us play through or what? 1.4286 0.08748 49 31 15 3
245 He's not nuts, just preparing for climate change. 1.4286 0.08248 49 30 17 2
246 Well, he was here first. 1.4286 0.08748 49 31 15 3
247 Go get a couple of bottles of water, I sense profit. 1.4286 0.10514 49 35 7 7
248 He was in "Cats" for a loooong time 1.4286 0.09221 49 32 13 4
249 It's small, but rent-controlled 1.4286 0.08748 49 31 15 3
250 I don't want to grow up! 1.4286 0.09671 49 33 11 5
251 I hate art. 1.4286 0.09221 49 32 13 4
252 I think it's too early to say whether he'll play well with others. 1.4286 0.08248 49 30 17 2
253 Keep digging Dad. You'll find your self esteem in there somewhere. 1.4286 0.09221 49 32 13 4
254 We brought you a pail and shovel. It's much more fun with toys. 1.4286 0.10102 49 34 9 6
255 His GPS is down. 1.4286 0.08748 49 31 15 3
256 No, you get in first. 1.4286 0.09671 49 33 11 5
257 I think your pail of water might be worth big bucks! 1.4286 0.09671 49 33 11 5
258 This is what happens when you can't think outside the box. 1.4286 0.09221 49 32 13 4
259 Senators from Texas really shouldn't campaign in New York. 1.4255 0.09494 47 31 12 4
260 My dad can't think outside the box. 1.4255 0.09494 47 31 12 4
261 Sorry ‘bout this. My dad spent the weekend binge-watching Lost. 1.4255 0.09494 47 31 12 4
262 His problem is his inability to think outside the box. 1.4255 0.08994 47 30 14 3
263 You set up the lemonade stand and I'll research price gouging. 1.4255 0.09970 47 32 10 5
264 He said he was trying to stop drinking 1.4255 0.10423 47 33 8 6
265 Well on the bright side, we're not seeing as much cat poop. 1.4255 0.08994 47 30 14 3
266 Worst Airbnb ever. 1.4255 0.09970 47 32 10 5
267 He's still convinced that all he really needs to know he learned in kindergarten. 1.4255 0.08464 47 29 16 2
268 I told ya it wasn't a cat using our sandbox! 1.4255 0.10423 47 33 8 6
269 I just can't get him to think outside the box. 1.4255 0.09494 47 31 12 4
270 Rough day,dad ? 1.4255 0.09494 47 31 12 4
271 Adults ruin everything. 1.4250 0.11815 40 29 5 6
272 Maybe we could build the zen garden around him. 1.4242 0.12332 33 23 6 4
273 Looks like its time for another intervention. 1.4231 0.08833 52 34 14 4
274 If I dig the grave, no sharesies on the wallet. 1.4222 0.10293 45 31 9 5
275 He couldn't afford the full desert survival course. 1.4222 0.10293 45 31 9 5
276 Maybe it's a mirage. 1.4222 0.09260 45 29 13 3
277 Mom calls it his 'Middle East Crisis.' 1.4222 0.10293 45 31 9 5
278 Exactly when did he lose his keys in there? 1.4222 0.10293 45 31 9 5
279 Should we tell him that the drinking fountain is inside the school? 1.4222 0.09790 45 30 11 4
280 This guy should start thinking outside the box 1.4222 0.10773 45 32 7 6
281 He gave me the first month's rent and a security deposit. 1.4222 0.08697 45 28 15 2
282 It's a humane interim step before he's actually fired. 1.4211 0.15887 19 13 4 2
283 He appears to need it more than us. 1.4186 0.10112 43 29 10 4
284 I hope he's not a cat person! 1.4186 0.10112 43 29 10 4
285 Maybe we should open a lemonade stand. 1.4186 0.08308 43 26 16 1
286 Dad, try thinking outside the box. 1.4186 0.08308 43 26 16 1
287 He doesn't know how to think out of the box. 1.4167 0.09800 48 33 10 5
288 See? I told you those weren't from a cat. 1.4167 0.09800 48 33 10 5
289 Yes, but how I got the sand to stick to the conveyor belt is what will impress the science fair judges. 1.4167 0.09337 48 32 12 4
290 They say one day he came out here at recess and just never left. 1.4167 0.10666 48 35 6 7
291 Leave him in a bit longer...I think the Sandbox-Detox idea is showing promise. 1.4167 0.08333 48 30 16 2
292 Put a couple of quarters on the ledge, Ceil, so he knows we're next. 1.4167 0.09800 48 33 10 5
293 Your Dad is kind of a drama queen. 1.4167 0.09800 48 33 10 5
294 I forget, what is playground etiquette in regard to the weird kid? 1.4167 0.09337 48 32 12 4
295 I thought that Gary's email said "come up to the roof for a little dessert" 1.4167 0.12199 36 26 5 5
296 He's in training for the Dubai Olympics. 1.4146 0.10462 41 28 9 4
297 Should we mention that drinking fountain over there? 1.4146 0.09862 41 27 11 3
298 He's been drinking outside the box. 1.4146 0.09862 41 27 11 3
299 When do you think Dad will be done trying to find his childhood? 1.4146 0.10462 41 28 9 4
300 It's getting late buddy -- you'd better turn back. 1.4130 0.09103 46 30 13 3
301 He just needs to start thinking outside of it. 1.4130 0.09103 46 30 13 3
302 Looks like we'll be having a substitute in Mr. Walker's class again. 1.4130 0.09103 46 30 13 3
303 He came with the kit. 1.4130 0.09619 46 31 11 4
304 His fitness watch broke, so he has no idea when to stop. 1.4130 0.09103 46 30 13 3
305 His Fit Bit is up to 33. 1.4130 0.10109 46 32 9 5
306 I think he's had enough. Give him his cell phone back. 1.4130 0.10109 46 32 9 5
307 Survivor - Kindergarten 1.4130 0.08556 46 29 15 2
308 If he starts meowing and scratching, I'm outta here. 1.4130 0.10109 46 32 9 5
309 I'm NOT cleaning that up. 1.4130 0.08556 46 29 15 2
310 Hey mister, you’re in the wrong cartoon. 1.4130 0.09619 46 31 11 4
311 Let's come back later - it looks like he's in the middle of something. 1.4130 0.09103 46 30 13 3
312 Common Core eventually gets to all the teachers. 1.4130 0.10576 46 33 7 6
313 This is where dad comes to dry out. 1.4130 0.10576 46 33 7 6
314 He books the same hour every week. 1.4091 0.09377 44 29 12 3
315 Now do you understand why the co-op board banned him from the pool? 1.4091 0.08795 44 28 14 2
316 Should we tell him we already found his car keys? 1.4091 0.08795 44 28 14 2
317 It doesn't look like much but I tell you we Green Screen the rest and we'll have another Lawrence of Arabia. 1.4091 0.10938 44 32 6 6
318 He says he lost a quarter there when he was five. 1.4091 0.10444 44 31 8 5
319 This is just sad on so many levels 1.4091 0.11411 44 33 4 7
320 Not so much fun, is it, dad? 1.4091 0.10444 44 31 8 5
321 We finally get rid of the cat, and now this? 1.4091 0.09925 44 30 10 4
322 Our AirBnB guests just love the "extreme conditions" package. 1.4091 0.09925 44 30 10 4
323 Throw in your bucket, let's see if he kicks it. 1.4048 0.10809 42 30 7 5
324 I don'know. He came with the sand. 1.4048 0.10258 42 29 9 4
325 Interesting situation. I'll bet my shovel against your bucket that he doesn't make it. 1.4048 0.10258 42 29 9 4
326 Somebody needs a juice-box. 1.4048 0.09055 42 27 13 2
327 I was sure we had this sandbox reserved. 1.4043 0.08418 47 30 15 2
328 Lawrence of Manhattan. 1.4043 0.10386 47 34 7 6
329 Please tell me he didn’t just meow. 1.4043 0.09453 47 32 11 4
330 Is Aunt Rita still single? 1.4032 0.08744 62 44 11 7
331 The condo board denied his request for a lap pool. 1.4000 0.08646 45 29 14 2
332 Let's give him another ten minutes. If he's not dead by then, we can find another sandbox. 1.4000 0.09744 45 31 10 4
333 Should we go get his mom? 1.4000 0.08646 45 29 14 2
334 Sorry, my dad is a method actor. 1.4000 0.10249 45 32 8 5
335 Yes, Virginia, there is a Sandman. 1.4000 0.08646 45 29 14 2
336 But is it art? 1.4000 0.09211 45 30 12 3
337 I just don't think he is capable of thinking outside the box. 1.4000 0.10249 45 32 8 5
338 Who's Wilson? 1.4000 0.09744 45 31 10 4
339 Poor Uncle Joe--he can't think inside or outside the box. 1.4000 0.08646 45 29 14 2
340 He's not stay-at-home dad material. 1.4000 0.10622 40 28 8 4
341 Should we tell him that this isn't what we meant by the nearest New York City hot spot? 1.4000 0.08646 45 29 14 2
342 Okay, cue the vultures. 1.4000 0.08040 45 28 16 1
343 Thinking back, he may have ordered a small *dessert*. 1.4000 0.09211 45 30 12 3
344 He's the mastermind behind adult coloring books. This was supposed to be his next big thing... 1.4000 0.10249 45 32 8 5
345 You'd think at some point he'd give up looking for his keys and just call Uber. 1.4000 0.10000 40 27 10 3
346 A Chinese collector wants to buy it for thirty million. 1.4000 0.10249 45 32 8 5
347 They just don't make quicksand like they used to. 1.4000 0.09744 45 31 10 4
348 He seems to be searching for the Republican candidate who might win. 1.4000 0.10622 40 28 8 4
349 It's not huge, but he only pays $3,000 a month for it. 1.4000 0.10249 45 32 8 5
350 I think he's going to be a while. 1.4000 0.09211 45 30 12 3
351 At what point do you think we should tell them it's not in there? 1.4000 0.10208 35 23 10 2
352 And now we'll interview one of the first graduates of Trump University 1.4000 0.09744 45 31 10 4
353 I hate the way climate change has affected recess. 1.3958 0.09292 48 33 11 4
354 It's the last of the Republican front runners. 1.3953 0.10060 43 30 9 4
355 Has anybody seen my chin? 1.3953 0.11107 43 32 5 6
356 He needs to start drinking outside the box. 1.3953 0.10597 43 31 7 5
357 What we need is a buzzard. 1.3953 0.08892 43 28 13 2
358 Hey Mister! The Lee Strasberg Studio is on the 2nd floor... 1.3953 0.08246 43 27 15 1
359 Hey, Dad, could you do your penance somewhere else? 1.3953 0.08892 43 28 13 2
360 Legally, if he plays a few more hours we can claim him as a dependent. 1.3953 0.10060 43 30 9 4
361 He never should have relied on his GPS 1.3953 0.09494 43 29 11 3
362 Sorry, but we reserved the sandbox from noon to one. 1.3953 0.08892 43 28 13 2
363 It's your turn to clean his litter box. 1.3953 0.10597 43 31 7 5
364 He lost his marbles 1.3953 0.09494 43 29 11 3
365 Suburban kids only have to worry about cats using their sandbox. 1.3953 0.09494 43 29 11 3
366 I hired him to keep the cats out. 1.3953 0.10060 43 30 9 4
367 His mother left him here in 1995. 1.3953 0.09494 43 29 11 3
368 This may take a while....he says his best marketing ideas come to him in form of a mirage. 1.3953 0.10060 43 30 9 4
369 Better tell Billy his dad's off his meds again. 1.3947 0.10356 38 26 9 3
370 He has PTSD,post-traumatic sandbox disorder. 1.3947 0.11021 38 27 7 4
371 My dad says he didn't get into the right pre-K and it was all downhill from there. 1.3947 0.10356 38 26 9 3
372 Does not play well with others. 1.3939 0.09672 33 21 11 1
373 He's working his way up to the Sahara. 1.3913 0.09051 46 31 12 3
374 I wish Dad would look somewhere else for his urban oasis. 1.3913 0.09051 46 31 12 3
375 He's one camel short of an oasis. 1.3913 0.09051 46 31 12 3
376 My Mom says it's something called French Foreign Legionnaires' Disease. 1.3913 0.09051 46 31 12 3
377 Earl has a gift for sucking the joy out of sandbox time. 1.3913 0.09570 46 32 10 4
378 Maybe we should come back when he's dead. 1.3913 0.09570 46 32 10 4
379 He's unable to think outside the box. 1.3913 0.09570 46 32 10 4
380 Last Thursday I found him face down in my Play Doh. 1.3913 0.08500 46 30 14 2
381 Still searching for your dignity? 1.3902 0.10976 41 30 6 5
382 It's a lap pool for desert trekkers. 1.3902 0.09802 41 28 10 3
383 My dad says the shortage of public restrooms is ridiculous. 1.3902 0.08467 41 26 14 1
384 Method acting school on the third floor. You'll get used to it. 1.3902 0.09159 41 27 12 2
385 And that, Timmy, is why I don't eat paste any more. 1.3902 0.09802 41 28 10 3
386 He just can't think outside the box. 1.3902 0.10405 41 29 8 4
387 I liked it better when our teacher wasn't a performance artist. 1.3902 0.09159 41 27 12 2
388 My dad tends to overdo staycations. 1.3902 0.09802 41 28 10 3
389 He should be thinking out of the box. 1.3902 0.10976 41 30 6 5
390 He lost his keys downstairs, but there's more light up here. 1.3902 0.10405 41 29 8 4
391 He's out of the litter box, and that's all I really care about. 1.3902 0.09159 41 27 12 2
392 So this is why they tell us to think outside the box! 1.3902 0.09802 41 28 10 3
393 He has trouble thinking outside of the box! 1.3902 0.11518 41 31 4 6
394 He was a child left behind. 1.3898 0.07651 59 39 17 3
395 It's the new Bikram 1.3889 0.11463 36 26 6 4
396 Looks like we won't have to wait long for our turn in the sandbox. 1.3878 0.09136 49 34 11 4
397 A sauna just wasn't in the budget. 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
398 Hey Mister, it's time to start thinking out of the box. 1.3864 0.10392 44 32 7 5
399 Ironic, I always thought of this sandbox as an oasis. 1.3864 0.10392 44 32 7 5
400 It's ours when the vultures leave. 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
401 Let's leave the shovel and pail... he can clean up his own mess. 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
402 That must be one expensive contact lens. 1.3864 0.09319 44 30 11 3
403 He's been trying to find himself for days. 1.3864 0.09870 44 31 9 4
404 Odd... the Method actors rarely venture past the swing set. 1.3864 0.09870 44 31 9 4
405 You see him too? I thought he was a mirage! 1.3864 0.09870 44 31 9 4
406 Mrs. Freeley buried his Scotch again. 1.3846 0.09449 39 26 11 2
407 It's been his turn since 1997. 1.3846 0.10783 39 28 7 4
408 Shall we tell him about the drinking fountain? 1.3846 0.09449 39 26 11 2
409 I liked it better when the cats used it. 1.3846 0.10138 39 27 9 3
410 He should die soon, then we can play. 1.3846 0.11391 39 29 5 5
411 See, I told you thinking inside the box gets you nowhere. 1.3846 0.10138 39 27 9 3
412 He smokes Camels. 1.3846 0.11391 39 29 5 5
413 It's good to see my dad finally getting better after the divorce. 1.3846 0.09449 39 26 11 2
414 Last week he couldn't figure out how to get off the merry-go-round. 1.3846 0.10138 39 27 9 3
415 Burying your head in our sandbox won't make Trump disappear! 1.3846 0.10783 39 28 7 4
416 He really has to start thinking outside the box. 1.3846 0.10138 39 27 9 3
417 I wonder how he'll dig himself out of this one. 1.3846 0.10138 39 27 9 3
418 Water...Sparkling. Water. 1.3846 0.11391 39 29 5 5
419 My cat rents it out by the hour. 1.3846 0.10783 39 28 7 4
420 Should we tell him he's crawling AWAY from the water fountain? 1.3824 0.11182 34 24 7 3
421 My dad gets dramatic when we run out of bottled water. 1.3810 0.09611 42 29 10 3
422 Your turn to clean the litter. 1.3810 0.10197 42 30 8 4
423 He should try thinking outside the box. 1.3810 0.10197 42 30 8 4
424 He comes here for the Jersey shore experience. 1.3810 0.09611 42 29 10 3
425 I think he just meowed. Let's get out of here. 1.3810 0.09611 42 29 10 3
426 Did you tell him we've found the shovel? 1.3810 0.09611 42 29 10 3
427 Billy, it's been 35 years now. It's time to wash your hands and come inside. 1.3810 0.08986 42 28 12 2
428 If he doesn't make it, we can bury him. 1.3810 0.09611 42 29 10 3
429 It seems that coloring books are the gateway drug. 1.3810 0.10751 42 31 6 5
430 Is this like when the pool has adult swim? 1.3810 0.09611 42 29 10 3
431 Occupy Sandbox ran out of funding--he'll be gone by tomorrow. 1.3810 0.08986 42 28 12 2
432 The wavy line over his head means he smells bad. 1.3810 0.10197 42 30 8 4
433 I'd like to help him, but we're just mirages. 1.3810 0.09611 42 29 10 3
434 Ned's been searching for an urban oasis for quite a while. 1.3793 0.10427 29 19 9 1
435 Dad says we come from a desert people. 1.3784 0.08964 37 24 12 1
436 We're going to need a bigger shovel. 1.3784 0.10506 37 26 8 3
437 We finally got the cats to stop using it, and now this! 1.3784 0.08964 37 24 12 1
438 Now if only we could get him to stop spraying. 1.3784 0.10506 37 26 8 3
439 Is this what a midlife crisis looks like? 1.3784 0.11198 37 27 6 4
440 I can't sand this anymore. 1.3784 0.11198 37 27 6 4
441 He thinks he is Lawrence of Exurbia. 1.3778 0.10195 45 33 7 5
442 I don't know...mom says he's trying to find himself. 1.3778 0.08581 45 30 13 2
443 I think he just realized it's a litter box. 1.3778 0.09686 45 32 9 4
444 I guess burying Dad's bottles in the sandbox completely backfired huh? 1.3778 0.08581 45 30 13 2
445 There must be a grain of truth in here. 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
446 We should open a lemonade stand. 1.3778 0.09686 45 32 9 4
447 He catastrophizes everything. 1.3778 0.09150 45 31 11 3
448 We should've known adult coloring books would be a slippery slope for John... 1.3750 0.11144 40 30 5 5
449 Should we say something? 1.3750 0.09259 40 27 11 2
450 He's also been talking about going gluten free 1.3750 0.11144 40 30 5 5
451 He can't see the sand for the box. 1.3750 0.09928 40 28 9 3
452 My dad has bigger hangovers than your dad. 1.3750 0.10554 40 29 7 4
453 My teacher said the deserts in Tokyo are even smaller. 1.3750 0.09928 40 28 9 3
454 He only thinks inside the box. 1.3750 0.09928 40 28 9 3
455 This could get ugly. He identifies as a cat. 1.3750 0.09928 40 28 9 3
456 We suggest you start thinking out of the box. 1.3750 0.10554 40 29 7 4
457 That's why I decided against contact lenses. 1.3750 0.09259 40 27 11 2
458 Churlish of me to say that it is neither performance nor art. 1.3750 0.09928 40 28 9 3
459 ... and in the winter, he used to walk to school barefoot, uphill, both ways. 1.3750 0.09259 40 27 11 2
460 In an existential sense, maybe we are merely part of his mirage. 1.3750 0.08539 40 26 13 1
461 It is so sad to see what happens when a Millennial loses his phone. 1.3750 0.09259 40 27 11 2
462 He's got to start thinking outside the sandbox. 1.3750 0.09928 40 28 9 3
463 He's really taking this casting call for "Survivor, Death Valley" seriously. 1.3750 0.11144 40 30 5 5
464 Yeah, but by New York standards, it's immense. 1.3750 0.09259 40 27 11 2
465 Either we're the mirage or he's nuts. I prefer that latter. 1.3750 0.09259 40 27 11 2
466 Does your dad ever do this? 1.3750 0.08539 40 26 13 1
467 It's pathetic watching them search for their lost youth 1.3750 0.08539 40 26 13 1
468 That's why Mom only allows me an hour in there. 1.3750 0.09928 40 28 9 3
469 It's not as good as his Stranded Man on a Desert Island, but it's good. 1.3750 0.08539 40 26 13 1
470 My dad did not have much of a childhood. 1.3750 0.09928 40 28 9 3
471 He's still an outdoor dad. 1.3750 0.09928 40 28 9 3
472 Poor fool, never could think outside of the box 1.3721 0.09426 43 30 10 3
473 I think, technically speaking, we are now supervising your dad. 1.3721 0.08819 43 29 12 2
474 Water? Are you kidding? We should build a wall. 1.3721 0.10536 43 32 6 5
475 Don't grow up, kids. It's not worth it. This used to be a lot bigger and a lot more fun. 1.3714 0.13020 35 28 1 6
476 I don't think we have to worry about the cost of college. 1.3714 0.11657 35 26 5 4
477 Actually, I wanted a dessert. 1.3714 0.10913 35 25 7 3
478 He keeps mumbling about the long campaign. 1.3714 0.10913 35 25 7 3
479 He's almost completely housebroken! 1.3710 0.07708 62 43 15 4
480 He's been in timeout since August. 1.3696 0.08987 46 32 11 3
481 It's the stage of withdrawal where he starts looking for old butts in anything that resembles an ashtray. 1.3696 0.10004 46 34 7 5
482 It's hard to find your marbles when you've lost them in a sandbox. 1.3684 0.10274 38 27 8 3
483 He's training to be a cartoon in The New Yorker. 1.3684 0.10945 38 28 6 4
484 I think he's been in time-out long enough. 1.3684 0.08781 38 25 12 1
485 He's Lawrence of PS 122 1.3684 0.08781 38 25 12 1
486 Do you think if we brought a bottle of water he'd leave? 1.3684 0.10274 38 27 8 3
487 My dad's been using it to train for "Survivor." 1.3684 0.09557 38 26 10 2
488 It doesn't look like we'll have to wait much longer. 1.3684 0.10945 38 28 6 4
489 Want to color instead? 1.3684 0.09557 38 26 10 2
490 We're still not sure how this "species-neutral" bathroom is going to play out. 1.3684 0.11576 38 29 4 5
491 Joey, I know your brother is training for the French Foreign Legion, but I wanna build a sand castle. 1.3684 0.09557 38 26 10 2
492 Some kids just take longer than others to start walking. 1.3659 0.10334 41 30 7 4
493 "Surely the add read, bring "Pail and Shovel" not "Pale and Disheveled". 1.3659 0.09726 41 29 9 3
494 If he doesn't find an oasis, he's done for. 1.3659 0.09077 41 28 11 2
495 Should we tell him the oasis is behind him? 1.3659 0.09077 41 28 11 2
496 This is my dad, he's in training for another cartoon. 1.3659 0.09726 41 29 9 3
497 He was an extra in "Cats" 1.3659 0.09726 41 29 9 3
498 Your delusion is encroaching on our recess. 1.3659 0.09077 41 28 11 2
499 He washed up from the kiddie pool. 1.3636 0.11364 33 24 6 3
500 The Guggenheim passed this up? 1.3636 0.08024 44 29 14 1
501 Having a method actor as a stay-at-home dad creates some novel play opportunities. 1.3636 0.11364 33 24 6 3
502 He thinks he's Lawrence of Suburbia. 1.3636 0.11364 33 24 6 3
503 Dad likes to make sure there's no gluten. 1.3617 0.10721 47 37 3 7
504 He'll be out soon. He thinks the oasis is just over the the next hill. 1.3611 0.09882 36 25 9 2
505 We just couldn't get him to think outside the box. 1.3611 0.09044 36 24 11 1
506 Teacher says my art project 'lacks empathy.' 1.3611 0.11376 36 27 5 4
507 I liked the Goldsworthy installation more. But, hey. We're here. 1.3611 0.09882 36 25 9 2
508 It's New York. If he can make it here, he can make it anywhere. 1.3611 0.09882 36 25 9 2
509 Whew!!That was close! We could have been stranded in there, too! 1.3611 0.10655 36 26 7 3
510 I heard Burning Man is full of these people. 1.3611 0.10655 36 26 7 3
511 I'm still going to vote for him. 1.3611 0.11376 36 27 5 4
512 I wish he'd practice groveling somewhere else. 1.3611 0.09044 36 24 11 1
513 Meet my Dad – he loves to play Survivor. 1.3611 0.10655 36 26 7 3
514 He's been searching for his childhood for the last two hours. 1.3611 0.09044 36 24 11 1
515 "Forget your castle, let's go get a drink". 1.3611 0.09044 36 24 11 1
516 I think his GPS is off. 1.3611 0.09882 36 25 9 2
517 My parents bought him to remind me how blessed I am. 1.3611 0.09044 36 24 11 1
518 Thank goodness he's finally litter-trained 1.3600 0.12754 25 18 5 2
519 We might have to wait a while. It's rent controlled. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
520 I'd rather have a cat. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
521 This is why I don't like cat people. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
522 This is why I'm not a fan of hot yoga. 1.3590 0.11315 39 30 4 5
523 He's completely disoriented without his pail and shovel. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
524 How long do you think he's going to keep him under there? 1.3590 0.10702 39 29 6 4
525 Remember when you asked me to explain a 'hot mess'? 1.3590 0.10052 39 28 8 3
526 It won't sell as well as an Endless Pool. 1.3590 0.10702 39 29 6 4
527 If you can't stand the heat, get out of the sandbox? 1.3590 0.11315 39 30 4 5
528 He's actually pretty high-ranking in Scientology. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
529 It is this year's staycation. 1.3590 0.10702 39 29 6 4
530 He lost his wallet at the beach, but the light is better here. 1.3590 0.10702 39 29 6 4
531 I'm gaining more respect for vultures. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
532 I this is where playing in the sandbox gets us, I say let's move on to the slide. 1.3590 0.11315 39 30 4 5
533 Somebody listed it on Airbnb under eco-tourism. 1.3590 0.10702 39 29 6 4
534 Mr. Clark, I don't think recess is long enough to see your one man production of Lawrence of Arabia. 1.3590 0.10052 39 28 8 3
535 Dad just hasn't been the same since Burning Man 1.3590 0.08605 39 26 12 1
536 His iPhone is not the only thing the cat buried in there. 1.3590 0.10702 39 29 6 4
537 Maybe it's time you think outside the box. 1.3590 0.10052 39 28 8 3
538 We should tell him the nearest oasis is over on 79th street. 1.3590 0.10702 39 29 6 4
539 For forty years he's been wandering in there... 1.3590 0.10702 39 29 6 4
540 He says the last thing he can remember is a cat trying to cover him up. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
541 Your dad is bumming me out. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
542 They cancelled his flight to Palm Springs. 1.3590 0.10052 39 28 8 3
543 He insists on calling it a hot yoga studio. 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
544 The deluxe edition of the Castaway Sandbox™ comes with a palm tree 1.3590 0.09357 39 27 10 2
545 This is what a beach vacation looks like after budget cuts. 1.3590 0.08605 39 26 12 1
546 We might be a Mirage... 1.3590 0.11315 39 30 4 5
547 I'm starting to think we're just a part of his imagination. 1.3571 0.09531 42 30 9 3
548 Last time he stayed in there for forty days. 1.3571 0.08901 42 29 11 2
549 He's searching for his childhood. 1.3571 0.10122 42 31 7 4
550 Watching this is still more entertaining than "Ishtar." 1.3571 0.16926 14 10 3 1
551 This Navy Seal training is starting to cut into our playtime ... 1.3571 0.08901 42 29 11 2
552 Now, tell me this isn't more fun that a roof garden. 1.3571 0.08901 42 29 11 2
553 He's a thirsting artist. 1.3548 0.10923 31 22 7 2
554 He comes here every Tuesday to find himself. 1.3548 0.10923 31 22 7 2
555 Yea Well....Nobody's Dad is perfect! 1.3548 0.09890 31 21 9 1
556 Sue, look what the cat dragged in. 1.3542 0.08148 48 33 13 2
557 He was once a Republican front runner until Trump came along. 1.3529 0.10240 34 24 8 2
558 Problem is he played too well in the sandbox 1.3529 0.11076 34 25 6 3
559 Are you going to tell him it's kitty litter or am I? 1.3529 0.10240 34 24 8 2
560 First the neighborhood cats, now him. 1.3529 0.10240 34 24 8 2
561 I love live art. What should we call it? The Stinx? 1.3529 0.11076 34 25 6 3
562 Let's play Vulture. 1.3529 0.10240 34 24 8 2
563 It's the best I could do with limited space. 1.3529 0.10240 34 24 8 2
564 Do you think we should offer him a Perrier? 1.3529 0.09329 34 23 10 1
565 I guess the sandbox treadmill wasn't such a great idea after all. 1.3514 0.07957 37 24 13 0
566 Daddy calls it urban sprawl. 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
567 He says he's Lawrence of Sutton Place. 1.3514 0.10409 37 27 7 3
568 Man, that kid's turn is taking forever! 1.3514 0.10409 37 27 7 3
569 Should I tell Dad that I have his watch? 1.3514 0.08850 37 25 11 1
570 'Method acting' aside, it's our turn, Mister. 1.3514 0.10409 37 27 7 3
571 Flat or sparkling? 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
572 Daddy, are you that sure Tabby ate Mommy's diamond ring? 1.3514 0.08850 37 25 11 1
573 He was the most recent head of marketing for Volkswagen's diesel engine division. 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
574 Crawling hours are between 8 and 10. 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
575 OK, we'll give him 5 more minutes, then we have to clean him up for the convention. 1.3514 0.08850 37 25 11 1
576 He's taking "hot yoga" to an all new level. 1.3514 0.11107 37 28 5 4
577 How long do you plan on looking for your contact lens? 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
578 It's just another day in the existential sandbox. 1.3514 0.11107 37 28 5 4
579 Should I tell him I already found his nickel? 1.3514 0.08850 37 25 11 1
580 We could just pretend he's a camel. 1.3514 0.08850 37 25 11 1
581 Looks like we're going to have to wait until the vultures are finished. 1.3514 0.10409 37 27 7 3
582 The downside of the Sahara diet is we lose our sandbox. 1.3514 0.08850 37 25 11 1
583 Drama teachers...... 1.3514 0.10409 37 27 7 3
584 His name is Lawrence 1.3514 0.08850 37 25 11 1
585 Boy, this is a bad place to lose a contact. 1.3514 0.10409 37 27 7 3
586 I think it's time we tell him we found his contact lens. 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
587 At least it's more spacious than that shoebox he was living in downtown. 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
588 It may be your installation art, but it's our sandbox. 1.3514 0.10409 37 27 7 3
589 He's trying out for a reality show. 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
590 A stray cat ate his car keys 3 days ago. 1.3514 0.10409 37 27 7 3
591 Maybe we're the mirage. 1.3514 0.10409 37 27 7 3
592 It's part of a corporate retreat. 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
593 I don't know if he's hallucinating or if we are. 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
594 Maybe we're both a mirage. 1.3514 0.08850 37 25 11 1
595 Why can't he just see a shrink like Mom? 1.3514 0.09661 37 26 9 2
596 I'm putting my money on the guy shipwrecked in the wading pool. 1.3500 0.10470 40 30 6 4
597 Mom said his therapist ought to be sued. 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
598 God, Francine, I hate cleaning his litter box. 1.3500 0.10470 40 30 6 4
599 I think the new watering regulations are overly harsh 1.3500 0.10470 40 30 6 4
600 We're going to need a bigger box. 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
601 Hey pal, we don't inhabit your world of cynicism, hedonism or hypocrisy, so get the hell out our sandbox! 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
602 I'm sure he's just passing through. 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
603 The Co-Op Board wouldn't let us have a cat. 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
604 If he strikes oil we need to be ready. 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
605 How long do your dad's acid trips usually last? 1.3500 0.09838 40 29 8 3
606 I'm not sure that these new public toilets are going to work out. 1.3500 0.10470 40 30 6 4
607 That's my dad. He's a moron. 1.3500 0.10470 40 30 6 4
608 Worst sense of direction I've ever seen. 1.3500 0.09164 40 28 10 2
609 I've never been in a hallucination before. 1.3488 0.09344 43 31 9 3
610 He's auditioning for Cats next week. 1.3478 0.13497 23 17 4 2
611 He's a minimalist. 1.3478 0.11943 23 16 6 1
612 See what happens when you ignore the big picture? 1.3478 0.13497 23 17 4 2
613 He's getting worse. Asking us to call him "Moses". He's been up here for weeks. 1.3462 0.08634 52 38 10 4
614 Since when did Al Gore become so dramatic? 1.3462 0.13522 26 20 3 3
615 He's trying to remember where he drew that line he'd never cross. 1.3438 0.09640 32 22 9 1
616 And when he's done playing stranded on the desert island, he goes down to the trash room and plays post-apocalyptic scavenger. 1.3438 0.11544 32 24 5 3
617 Beach front property doesn't come any cheaper than this. 1.3438 0.10634 32 23 7 2
618 Rooftop sandboxes aren't as much fun as they sound. 1.3438 0.11544 32 24 5 3
619 He won't leave without a caption. 1.3438 0.11544 32 24 5 3
620 But on some level aren't we all chasing mirages? 1.3429 0.09114 35 24 10 1
621 Great, Dad's trying out for "Survivor" again... 1.3429 0.09994 35 25 8 2
622 And we thought yesterday's cat was a problem. 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
623 I think this is what adults call eminent domain. 1.3429 0.08140 35 23 12 0
624 Without consequences sales goals are meaningless. 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
625 How many more method acting classes does have Dad left? 1.3429 0.09114 35 24 10 1
626 Burt Lancaster? 1.3429 0.11554 35 27 4 4
627 Should we move the kiddie pool closer? 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
628 I completely understand. It was the best part of my life too. 1.3429 0.08140 35 23 12 0
629 I just wish he would try and recapture his youth somewhere else. 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
630 That was before "No Child Left Behind" 1.3429 0.09994 35 25 8 2
631 My Dad just has to sleep on the couch. 1.3429 0.09994 35 25 8 2
632 He's half way there. 1.3429 0.09114 35 24 10 1
633 It's my first solo exhibition. 1.3429 0.09994 35 25 8 2
634 A desert of his own making. 1.3429 0.09994 35 25 8 2
635 My Dad got into performance art after his fourth month of unemployment. 1.3429 0.09994 35 25 8 2
636 A rooftop pool-party sure looks different in the era of global warming. 1.3429 0.09114 35 24 10 1
637 I was so looking forward to sifting out the cigarette butts with you. 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
638 He definitely needs to think outside the box! 1.3429 0.09994 35 25 8 2
639 Dad’s been on the wagon since noon. 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
640 Here's why Occupy Sandbox failed. No movement. 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
641 I think we captured the realism. 1.3429 0.10802 35 26 6 3
642 We're on a time share contract. He has it until 2:30. 1.3429 0.09114 35 24 10 1
643 I don't care if he spit out a hairball, I am not scooping out his poop. 1.3421 0.10850 38 29 5 4
644 Dad, I'll buy you a new contact lens. 1.3421 0.08663 38 26 11 1
645 You're right. We should just drive down to the beach. 1.3421 0.09449 38 27 9 2
646 Please tell me he didn't actually use that as a litter box. 1.3421 0.10174 38 28 7 3
647 Doesn't think outside-the-sandbox. 1.3421 0.09449 38 27 9 2
648 Water conservation laws have made Howard's lap pool quite a challenge. 1.3421 0.10174 38 28 7 3
649 Want to buy a pail and shovel 1.3421 0.09449 38 27 9 2
650 ONE MAN'S SANDBOX IS ANOTHER MAN'S DESERT 1.3421 0.10174 38 28 7 3
651 He's been in time out since 1983. 1.3421 0.10174 38 28 7 3
652 This is why I'm never switching to contact lenses. 1.3421 0.09449 38 27 9 2
653 We live in a concrete desert, Marvin. 1.3421 0.08663 38 26 11 1
654 He said something about a wrong turn in Albuquerque. 1.3421 0.08663 38 26 11 1
655 I can see the appeal of adult coloring books, but these adult sandboxes are downright depressing. 1.3415 0.11375 41 33 2 6
656 He says he's a Superdelegate. 1.3415 0.09633 41 30 8 3
657 The cat won't be happy about this. 1.3415 0.08978 41 29 10 2
658 Looks like Ron's still on his spiritual journey. 1.3333 0.08909 36 25 10 1
659 Usually it's cats. 1.3333 0.11237 33 25 5 3
660 I really misunderstood you when you told me your Dad was an 'outdoorsman'. 1.3333 0.11269 36 28 4 4
661 You can take the man out of the Gobi but you can't take the Gobi out of the man! 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
662 Did you hear that party last night? 1.3333 0.11269 36 28 4 4
663 You think everything stops being fun eventually? 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
664 On the bright side, at least he doesn't think he's a cat. 1.3333 0.09096 48 36 8 4
665 He says he's preparing for a Trump presidency. 1.3333 0.09401 33 23 9 1
666 I'm not sure whose dad that is, but I think he's lost. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
667 A few more hours and he'll be ready to drink water from Flint, Michigan. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
668 He's reliving his childhood. 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
669 Isn't he supposed to be potty trained? 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
670 Dad, I found my shovel last week. 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
671 It's gone from an urban jungle to an urban desert around here. 1.3333 0.08909 36 25 10 1
672 We couldn't afford an 'Endless Pool'. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
673 Somebody had a rough play date. 1.3333 0.08909 36 25 10 1
674 Has Bikram yoga gone too far? 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
675 Mom dropped her ring in the cat food. 1.3333 0.12066 30 23 4 3
676 It may be too late for Uncle Ed to have that happy childhood. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
677 I've seen this before. Don't worry - the vultures will take care of it. 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
678 They say he was exiled from the 2nd grade back in '84, been roaming this wasteland ever since. 1.3333 0.11237 33 25 5 3
679 What's a contact lens? 1.3333 0.09401 33 23 9 1
680 He quit drinking. 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
681 He asked his wife to forgive him, and she said "pound sand." 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
682 He needs to think out of the box. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
683 Throw the water; this is our recess time 1.3333 0.11269 36 28 4 4
684 He's been feeling deserted. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
685 Watch when he realizes this is a mirage. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
686 " - You can take the man out of the desert..." Submitted by Neil L. Sachs, Monmouth Junction, NJ 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
687 Now I see why they always tell us to think outside the box. 1.3333 0.11073 30 22 6 2
688 He never learned to think outside the box. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
689 The Downside of Feeling the Bern 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
690 Mr. Johnson works hard, and he plays hard. 1.3333 0.11237 33 25 5 3
691 OK so they ran out of "Survivor" locations. The producers still aren't going to like it. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
692 ...Primal Sandbox Therapy. It's all the rage. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
693 I like his chances of being rescued. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
694 Should we call him a camel? 1.3333 0.08909 36 25 10 1
695 He said the treadmill lacked authenticity. 1.3333 0.09401 33 23 9 1
696 Not what I had in mind when I heard "Corporate Retreat." 1.3333 0.08909 36 25 10 1
697 You were right... our Kindergarten teacher IS a drama-king! 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
698 Who's gonna tell him we're here to clean the litterbox? 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
699 Mommy, he's not sharing! 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
700 So the sandman is actually real. Go figure. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
701 If he doesn't dry out this time, mom says to bury him. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
702 Mom wont let him join the French Foreign Legion. 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
703 should we toss him your juice-box or wait for the buzzards to stop circling? 1.3333 0.09401 33 23 9 1
704 He says he's looking for his lost shaker of salt. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
705 Your mommy is going to be really mad that you played in your fancy shoes. 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
706 Never one to think outside the box. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
707 I think he's looking for his inner child. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
708 It's like an endless pool, except without the water. 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
709 He needs a new therapist. 1.3333 0.10360 33 24 7 2
710 We have to think outside the box 1.3333 0.11237 33 25 5 3
711 It's Mr. Katz from 6B. He's a method actor. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
712 Worst. MeetUp. Ever. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
713 Maybe it wasn't cat poop we found yesterday. 1.3333 0.09535 45 34 7 4
714 Never thought I'd say this, but I miss my cubicle. 1.3333 0.09948 39 29 7 3
715 Why is that man meowing? 1.3333 0.11237 33 25 5 3
716 It's the newest Fitbit challenge 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
717 I say we vote him off the sandbox. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
718 I'm not sure the human litter box idea will ever catch on. 1.3333 0.11237 33 25 5 3
719 These 'team-building' exercises just keep getting weirder. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
720 He thinks we're the mirage. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
721 Now, downward facing dog for unresolved constipation. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
722 What with global warming this is what's left of Gilligan's Island. 1.3333 0.08909 36 25 10 1
723 He misses his cat. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
724 I hope he covers it up when he's done -- like last time. 1.3333 0.11237 33 25 5 3
725 Catman really takes the fun out of having a rooftop sandbox. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
726 Marco! 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
727 I guess we harassed the substitute a little too hard. 1.3333 0.10541 36 27 6 3
728 Another method actor. 1.3333 0.09759 36 26 8 2
729 It's been three days; he's not going to make it. 1.3250 0.10370 40 31 5 4
730 Deserts in New York are small but efficient. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
731 How are we going to get him to start thinking outside the box? 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
732 His wife left him after he clawed through their last sofa. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
733 Oh, great! First the cats and now this! 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
734 Dad always goes to the worst case scenario. 1.3243 0.08711 37 26 10 1
735 My dad can't swim so we got him the Endless Desert. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
736 He's actually feelin' THE BERN! 1.3243 0.10292 37 28 6 3
737 At least he stopped leaving us hairballs on the couch. 1.3243 0.09534 37 27 8 2
738 Let him dig himself out of this one. 1.3243 0.10997 37 29 4 4
739 Sand traps can be confusing for the non-golfer. 1.3243 0.10997 37 29 4 4
740 Hey Mr. Wilson. Do you mind if we play through? 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
741 My lunch money says he doesn't make it. 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
742 He still thinks that oil is selling for $100 a barrel. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
743 How long has your dad been preparing for Survivor? 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
744 I say its time to call the vet 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
745 He's taking his Castaway audition a little too seriously. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
746 Is this his 'dry sense of humor'? 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
747 All we know is his name is Lawrence and he's not from around here! 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
748 I heard, a neighborhood cat ate his wedding ring. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
749 And I thought I had issues. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
750 I killed him in the Kalahari Desert and got him stuffed 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
751 My uncle comes up here whenever he gets homesick for Tucson. 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
752 Poor guy. He must suffer from post traumatic sandbox disorder. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
753 This isn't performance art. It's a man in a rooftop litter box. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
754 Has your dad been watching 'Lawrence of Arabia' again? 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
755 I remember what it felt like to sit through Ishtar 1.3235 0.08144 34 23 11 0
756 Think outside the box Jim! 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
757 Spare the rod and spoil the inner child. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
758 This is still a nicer beach than Atlantic City. 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
759 He says he misses the DRY heat 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
760 The cat's not going to be happy. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
761 Another homesick tourist from Scottsdale. 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
762 He lost his job in the silicon valley. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
763 I hate cleaning the executive litter box. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
764 And the apartment rooftop includes access to a private beach. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
765 This might explain why we've had a substitute for Mr. Johnson this month ! 1.3235 0.08144 34 23 11 0
766 Just stick a potted plant & a bucket of water over there. Maybe he'll think it's an oasis! 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
767 "He always forgets his pail and shovel." Submitted by Douglas Monaghan, Floral Park, NY 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
768 I picked a bad day to quit hand sanitizer. 1.3235 0.11731 34 27 3 4
769 He started training for the English Channel in a bathtub. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
770 ...And among our Fitness Center amenities is our rooftop Lost in the Sahara feature. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
771 "At least he's keeping the cats away". 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
772 You're scooping it out yourself this time, "Cat Man". 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
773 Mom was right, Brooklyn is a hipster playground. 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
774 I thought it was your turn to put the cover on the sandbox. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
775 Uncle Joe is from Death Valley 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
776 It's always so creepy when that lost childhood thing happens. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
777 Recess used to be fun until we had to share the sandbox with the Drama teacher... 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
778 Should we tell him this is all a mirage? 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
779 He said we're a mirage. 1.3235 0.08144 34 23 11 0
780 My dad's practicing for global-warming. 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
781 Let's get the hose. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
782 He should have stuck with the Endless Pool. This Endless desert looks boring. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
783 In his defense, hot yoga classes are expensive. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
784 They call it art. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
785 They say he still waits for his mother to call him home 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
786 He's training for the Sahara Marathon. 1.3235 0.11731 34 27 3 4
787 I gave him a “B”; he doesn’t play well with others but can take the heat. 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
788 You can take the drunk out of the sand, but the vomit is another story. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
789 That's what end-stage 'Sand Addiction' looks like. 1.3235 0.08144 34 23 11 0
790 It's his practice box for climate change. 1.3235 0.09173 34 24 9 1
791 This is an example of why the scientists are wrong and global warming is a fallacy. Look how small our deserts have become. 1.3235 0.10945 34 26 5 3
792 Play dates were more fun before your dad hit rock bottom. 1.3235 0.10098 34 25 7 2
793 My Dad would never survive in the real world. 1.3226 0.10763 31 23 6 2
794 Who's the good kitty now? 1.3226 0.11720 31 24 4 3
795 Like he's the only one in need of play therapy? 1.3226 0.10763 31 23 6 2
796 Suffering silently is truly a lost art. 1.3226 0.11720 31 24 4 3
797 Did your Dad watch Survivor again last night? 1.3226 0.09713 31 22 8 1
798 O.K. You've made your point about global warming. 1.3226 0.09713 31 22 8 1
799 ''We found him while vacationing in Arizona.'' 1.3226 0.10763 31 23 6 2
800 Hold your nose, Doris. Catman's just about to show off his superpower. 1.3214 0.10356 28 20 7 1
801 It's no use , he just can't think inside the box. 1.3214 0.11563 28 21 5 2
802 He always has to be so dramatic. 1.3171 0.08144 41 29 11 1
803 We should teach him to think out of the box... 1.3158 0.08522 38 27 10 1
804 I miss the cat. 1.3143 0.10668 35 27 5 3
805 Wait until he finds out that cat was no mirage. 1.3143 0.10668 35 27 5 3
806 That's Mr. Winters, our fourth grade irony counselor. 1.3143 0.09849 35 26 7 2
807 He's trying to find his childhood. Should I give him my shovel? 1.3143 0.08955 35 25 9 1
808 He just tore off his nicotine patch and said he'd crawl a mile for a Camel. 1.3143 0.09849 35 26 7 2
809 Studies show that all problems begin in pre-k. 1.3143 0.08955 35 25 9 1
810 Can't your dad do his Death Valley Marathon training somewhere else? 1.3143 0.08955 35 25 9 1
811 If he survives he gets tickets to Hamilton! 1.3143 0.08955 35 25 9 1
812 They say he's been in time out for 20 years. 1.3143 0.10668 35 27 5 3
813 His daughter buried his keys in there two weeks ago. 1.3143 0.10668 35 27 5 3
814 I love my Pop. He always checks for cat poop first. 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
815 It is going to be the next Soul Cycle. 1.3125 0.11392 32 25 4 3
816 Another one of those Burning Sanders supporters. 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
817 We may have to start playing outside the box. 1.3125 0.11392 32 25 4 3
818 Well, there goes the playground. 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
819 Do you think he knows there's a water fountain inside? 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
820 No, we're the mirage. 1.3125 0.09459 32 23 8 1
821 He said he really misses his old cartoon. 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
822 He claims to have tenure. 1.3125 0.09459 32 23 8 1
823 Could your dad relive his traumas elsewhere? 1.3125 0.11392 32 25 4 3
824 He'd rather die than give us a turn. 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
825 I'll never make it out of this desert alive unless I find my contacts! 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
826 I hate performance art. 1.3125 0.09459 32 23 8 1
827 No Dad, we don't want to play 'possible effects of climate change' again. 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
828 My dad is an unemployed archeologist 1.3125 0.11392 32 25 4 3
829 Always with the drama when he misplaces his water bottle. 1.3125 0.08325 32 22 10 0
830 He still doesn't believe in global warming. 1.3125 0.09459 32 23 8 1
831 They call him'The Human Cigarette'. 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
832 He used to headline at The Sands. 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
833 I prefer him over that darn cat any day.... 1.3125 0.10470 32 24 6 2
834 What part of "You're grown up now" doesn't he understand? 1.3125 0.11392 32 25 4 3
835 He said he was going to bury his head in the sand until this election was over, I just didn't believe him. 1.3125 0.11392 32 25 4 3
836 This guy never shares. 1.3111 0.08889 45 34 8 3
837 Yeah, my dad is trying out for the new 'Survivor' Sahara 1.3103 0.10053 29 21 7 1
838 We suspected a really big cat was using our box. 1.3103 0.10053 29 21 7 1
839 It's supposed to relieve stress. 1.3103 0.10053 29 21 7 1
840 He's gotta think outside the box. 1.3103 0.11212 29 22 5 2
841 I call it Zeno's Sandbox Paradox. 1.3103 0.11212 29 22 5 2
842 It's supposed to help you get used to living without a cell phone. 1.3103 0.10053 29 21 7 1
843 I tried telling him to think outside the box. 1.3103 0.12261 29 23 3 3
844 Somehow I don't think water is what he's looking for. 1.3103 0.11212 29 22 5 2
845 I think he wants to make sure no cats have been here. 1.3103 0.11212 29 22 5 2
846 I don't want to stick around and meet whatever cat that came out of. 1.3103 0.13227 29 24 1 4
847 He's clearly lost his marbles. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
848 Finally! Art that I can relate to. 1.3056 0.08746 36 26 9 1
849 I'm beginning to think we might be a mirage. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
850 It's what's replacing lap pools in California. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
851 I think the time is ripe to open that lemonade stand your always talking about. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
852 Mom did say to watch out for any creepy crawlers. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
853 He ordered the executive sandbox just before he received his pink slip. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
854 Dad thinks we're a mirage. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
855 Catman 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
856 I think it's too late for him to have a happy childhood. 1.3030 0.08124 33 23 10 0
857 He's been here for 40 days and 40 nights. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
858 Tom takes method acting to a whole new level. 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
859 The boss told him to work on his imagination. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
860 His pants keep a nice crease. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
861 Stress can change a man. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
862 The call him Lawrence of TriBeCa. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
863 Least he's not yelling 'Wilson' like the last guy. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
864 Let's hope he doesn't think he's a cat. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
865 That is one overly dramatic global warming protest. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
866 I don't know. I'd guess he's transitioning to house cat. 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
867 Come on Mike. Be reasonable. You've been in there an hour. It's our turn now. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
868 I heard him saying "No man is an island". 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
869 He has trouble thinking outside the sandbox. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
870 Sooner or later he will realize it's just a mirage... 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
871 It looks like the teachers are striking again. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
872 That guy knocked over my sandcastle, don't give him any water. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
873 So, his world really is his sandbox? 1.3030 0.11906 33 27 2 4
874 The sands of time wait for no man. 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
875 Probably cheaper than going to Hawaii. 1.3030 0.08124 33 23 10 0
876 I think he lost his mind 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
877 I hate living near an acting school. 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
878 Where's the horse with no name ? 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
879 If we find a contact lens, we'll let you know. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
880 Do you think that jar of pennies we dug up yesterday was this guys IRA? 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
881 Do you think he thinks he's almost there? 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
882 He's been like this since Mom cancelled Netflix. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
883 Maybe we should set up the lemonade stand again. 1.3030 0.08124 33 23 10 0
884 If you dig it, he will come. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
885 Bikram recess. 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
886 Dad hasn't been a lot of fun since he got back from survival training. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
887 He's training for 'Survivor'. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
888 Don't tell the cat. 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
889 Forget the play date, this looks serious. 1.3030 0.08124 33 23 10 0
890 Okay, your dad’s convinced me, an Endless Swimming Pool would be way more fun than our Endless Sandbox. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
891 Lap pool must be closed again. 1.3030 0.08124 33 23 10 0
892 He texted mom that he's in the mood for "desert" and he didn't want to look like an idiot. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
893 If he takes much longer we'll never get our turn!" 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
894 There are 19 million square miles of desert on Earth, and he gets lost in our sandbox. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
895 Best not to mention the cat in there just before him. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
896 Someone tell him it's wet cement, not sand. 1.3030 0.11906 33 27 2 4
897 You should have seen him at the Christmas party 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
898 I don't think this is what Ma meant when she told him to go pound sand 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
899 This situation calls for thinking outside the box. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
900 Don't worry, he gets out for an hour if we give him some beer money." 1.3030 0.09216 33 24 8 1
901 Looks like another homesick Californian 1.3030 0.11082 33 26 4 3
902 You think that's bad - last week, Ethan's dad drowned in the water table. 1.3030 0.10192 33 25 6 2
903 He never passed the preschool entrance exams. 1.3000 0.11890 30 24 3 3
904 He should probably start thinking outside the box. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
905 He swears there's one grain that looks like Donald Trump. 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
906 He keeps saying he wants to get to Mount Sinai but that's uptown.... 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
907 Only 36 more hours and my dad will break the Guinness record for sandbox crawling. 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
908 Method actors have all the fun. 1.3000 0.11890 30 24 3 3
909 Let it go... he says he is searching for truth 1.3000 0.11890 30 24 3 3
910 He's our local beach bum. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
911 Teacher said it's PTSD, Post-Traumatic Sandbox Disorder. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
912 Every time I complain about something, he reenacts what he had to do to get to school. 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
913 Viewers should know that this sand was flown in directly from the Sahara Desert and that Tom is a trained professional. Do not try this at home. 1.3000 0.08510 30 21 9 0
914 Boy, performance art is taking over everything! 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
915 We are evidently all part of an elaborate mirage. 1.3000 0.08510 30 21 9 0
916 I hope he's not doing what I think he's doing. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
917 So much for the family staycation. 1.3000 0.08510 30 21 9 0
918 Freud classifies regression as oral or anal but not everything fits neatly into a box. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
919 I've had enough of this Montessori crap. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
920 I don't believe the tiny desert survival course will catch on. 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
921 I like the old intern better. 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
922 If you can survive in the big city, you can survive anywhere. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
923 They say that every journey starts with the first step. This one ends there as well. 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
924 Unfortunately, he doesn't bore easily. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
925 It's a micro-climate. 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
926 I don't care if it's performance art or if he's really lost -- I just wanna shovel some sand. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
927 No, it's Mr. Ketchum who was adrift in the kiddie pool. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
928 I wonder if his mom knows where he is? 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
929 We've brought you some executive toys. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
930 maybe his inner child had a difficult childhood 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
931 When Daddy said he had to go scratch in the litter box, I thought he was just going to the bathroom. 1.3000 0.09767 30 22 7 1
932 If he wants water, he's going to have to think outside the box 1.3000 0.08510 30 21 9 0
933 Honest, we'll let you know if we find your inner child, sir. 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
934 I hope that is a mirage 1.3000 0.10881 30 23 5 2
935 Are you near deadline yet, Mr. Mankoff? 1.2973 0.10153 37 29 5 3
936 It's the logical successor to coloring books. 1.2973 0.10867 37 30 3 4
937 This rooftop gardening is harder than it looks... 1.2963 0.10425 27 20 6 1
938 One of the Captain Midnight decoder rings he lost in the 50s sold on eBay for 20 thousand bucks. 1.2963 0.10425 27 20 6 1
939 Although it looked great in the catalog, Bob ultimately lived to regret purchasing an Endless Sandbox. 1.2963 0.11712 27 21 4 2
940 I hope this isn't the same Sandman who Mommy says comes to my room every night. 1.2963 0.11712 27 21 4 2
941 This is corporate's sandbox. 1.2963 0.11712 27 21 4 2
942 That guy's inner child really needs a time out. 1.2963 0.11712 27 21 4 2
943 We've taken him out and dumped him off several times, but he always comes back. Might as well admit he's our cat now. 1.2955 0.09523 44 35 5 4
944 Daddy gets a little scary when he's dehydrated. 1.2955 0.07680 44 32 11 1
945 He's a new teacher from the Strasberg Preschool. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
946 He should think outside the box. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
947 he just needs to start drinking outside the box 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
948 He's thinking inside the box 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
949 Will you think outside of the box already? 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
950 I remember when I had my first beer 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
951 It's not as disturbing as Yoko Ono's "Cut Piece" but does make you think." 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
952 You should've seen him last week when he thought he was a fox and tried to eat Mrs. Ali's cat. 1.2941 0.10788 34 27 4 3
953 Ten years in a cubicle will do that. 1.2941 0.09928 34 26 6 2
954 It's a struggle for him to think outside the box. 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
955 Oh yeah, he's "feeling the Bern" 1.2941 0.08985 34 25 8 1
956 He found this rental through Airbnb 1.2927 0.10027 41 33 4 4
957 It's not an endless desert, Mister; it's a sand box. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
958 He's not an out-of-the-box thinker. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
959 Is he seeing a mirage or are we? 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
960 He used to be a doorman at the Mirage. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
961 Well I'm pretty sure it's not Brian Wilson. 1.2903 0.08287 31 22 9 0
962 We built the city around him. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
963 I told you we should have gotten the kind that clumps and deodorizes..... 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
964 It was half the price of an Endless Pool. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
965 Apparently the adult imagination, while still quite vivid, has lost its sense of wonder and creativity 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
966 Initially we thought he was a genius. Turns out he's just a middle aged alcoholic who takes advantage of innovative workplaces. 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
967 Now, is this your dad's masochism, your mom's sadism, or both? 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
968 It's the Mayor's damned "Let the Homeless In Your Rooftop Sandbox" initiative. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
969 Of all the sand pits in the world, he has to get lost in ours. 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
970 I think he's a mirage. 1.2903 0.08287 31 22 9 0
971 He wasn't sure how to log out of the sandbox. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
972 Let's tell him that just around the corner's an oasis. 1.2903 0.08287 31 22 9 0
973 I found him in the alley. I named him Mr. Kitty. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
974 And if that doesn't win the "Most lifelike sand sculpture" competition, it's a fix!" 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
975 Betcha his Fitbit is confused. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
976 That's it. I'm calling the super to fix the indoor plumbing. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
977 Do you want to borrow our shovel and pail? 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
978 He's not thinking outside the box. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
979 He wanted it for a low budget sequel to "High Plains Drifter" so I said "go ahead, make my day." 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
980 Ever feel like life's a desert and you're the mirage? 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
981 One of us is a mirage. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
982 I told you we shouldn't legalize marijuana. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
983 Post traumatic stress sandbox. 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
984 I thought he was making progress...Last week he was in a lounge chair with a Mai Tai 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
985 He is looking for lost Delegates. 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
986 Dad? I thought I lost my retainer but it is actually right here in my mouth. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
987 Your dad's lost again. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
988 Apparently his golden parachute was filled with sand. 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
989 Method actors are the worst! 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
990 Does he know it is for cats? 1.2903 0.08287 31 22 9 0
991 This happens every year at tax time. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
992 Heads or tails? 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
993 He starred in the movie Cast Away and he can't seem to move on. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
994 Being a kid isn't all fun and games, dad. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
995 The auditions for Shipwrecked 2 are the next sandbox over. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
996 My father models for desert cartoons. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
997 All right Clark, you made your point. We'll have the air conditioner repaired tomorrow. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
998 The sand soaks up the alcohol. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
999 Should we get him a juice box? 1.2903 0.08287 31 22 9 0
1000 All right already, I'll build him an oasis tomorrow. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1001 He said he'll get out at the oasis. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1002 Build a desert, and they will come. 1.2903 0.08287 31 22 9 0
1003 Did your dad lose his contact? Yeah, with reality. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1004 I'm going to need a bigger shovel. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1005 I told you that after adult coloring books we would get adult sandboxes. 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
1006 20 to 1, he doesn't make it out of the box. 1.2903 0.08287 31 22 9 0
1007 He can't go on. He must go on. He goes on. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1008 I heard it took him threes days to accend the monkey bars 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
1009 Geez. Somebody tell dad he doesn't need to demo the sandbox. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1010 Dad never has been very good at thinking inside the box. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1011 He was going to drill before the market collapsed. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1012 He mumbled something about homesteading. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1013 On the bright side, burying him will be rather easy. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1014 This is my Herb garden . 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1015 It's our turn, Dad. You've been playing California all week. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1016 Lessons in urban sustainability at the new elementary charter school 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1017 What's sad is that he's been there since Kindergarten. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1018 your new cat is your old dad 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1019 At least he buried it. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1020 We get it Mr. Humphrey, you're in a job desert, now can we have recess? 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
1021 I hope he makes it. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1022 Should I tell him to play in his own sandbox? 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
1023 It's been almost an hour and he still can't find his phone. 1.2903 0.08287 31 22 9 0
1024 Ignore him. It's a mirage. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1025 I guess I did tell him to play nice in the sand box for a week. 1.2903 0.10568 31 24 5 2
1026 Stuff really does grow quicker in sand. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1027 Survival is not a given. 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
1028 It looks like he never learned to think outside the box. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1029 Somebody - get this man a juice box! 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1030 Who's the new kid? 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1031 It's my dad's new immersive Passover seder experience 1.2903 0.11541 31 25 3 3
1032 He should be ready for a nap in about an hour. 1.2903 0.09497 31 23 7 1
1033 Are those mom's ashes? 1.2895 0.09167 38 29 7 2
1034 His shrink told him he had to find his lost childhood ! 1.2857 0.12448 28 23 2 3
1035 Well, at least it's not a cat. 1.2857 0.11336 28 22 4 2
1036 Leave it to a grown-up to take all the fun out of my Endless Sandbox. 1.2857 0.09677 35 27 6 2
1037 He's my latest shovel ready project. 1.2857 0.12448 28 23 2 3
1038 Would you believe he's still on the wait list for Exeter 1.2857 0.11336 28 22 4 2
1039 He usually gets tired by high noon. 1.2857 0.10102 28 21 6 1
1040 Our entry is entitled: It's about the journey, not the destination. 1.2857 0.08694 28 20 8 0
1041 Before this, it was spinning. 1.2857 0.10102 28 21 6 1
1042 Let's just throw out the whole litter box. 1.2857 0.10102 28 21 6 1
1043 His mirage...or ours? 1.2857 0.10102 28 21 6 1
1044 Maybe if we add water he'll think he's at the beach. 1.2857 0.11336 28 22 4 2
1045 Sometimes Dad has trouble thinking outside of the box. 1.2857 0.12448 28 23 2 3
1046 Do you ever think that maybe WE are the mirage? 1.2821 0.09684 39 31 5 3
1047 Patience. He's getting in touch with his inner cat. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1048 Just because a man can't think outside the box doesn't mean he has to crap in it. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1049 No, don’t worry about it. Guys do it in swimming pools, but not sandboxes. 1.2812 0.12077 32 27 1 4
1050 Let's try adult coloring books instead. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1051 Let's come back later. He looks like he doesn't play nice. 1.2812 0.08075 32 23 9 0
1052 "He hasn't gotten over being the first one kicked off the island on SURVIVOR". 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1053 Excuse me, but your time is up. We reserved the four o'clock slot. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1054 Still looking for that urban oasis .... 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1055 It's only a mirage. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1056 Cat man, don't! 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1057 They say he lost his contact in the 3th grade. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1058 How are we supposed to clean the kitty litter box of your dad won't get out ? 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1059 I don't think he'll make it. 1.2812 0.08075 32 23 9 0
1060 Ugh, Jack's in the box again. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1061 Not sure sandboxes on the highline are a good idea after all. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1062 You want to tell him he's in a sandbox? 1.2812 0.11211 32 26 3 3
1063 Well, at least he is not burying his head in the sand. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1064 He told me a week ago he dropped his keys. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1065 Can you help me find my contact lense? 1.2812 0.08075 32 23 9 0
1066 It could be worse, last week we had four beach bums to compete with. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1067 I don't know what a flashback is, sir, but we're supposed to take turns. 1.2812 0.09240 32 24 7 1
1068 Maybe it's just a mirage. 1.2812 0.10273 32 25 5 2
1069 Your dad sure is determined to find his inner child. 1.2800 0.09165 25 18 7 0
1070 You can take the desert out of the desert, but you can't take the nomad out of the nomad. 1.2800 0.13565 25 21 1 3
1071 'Hey - you're ruining the feng shui." 1.2800 0.10832 25 19 5 1
1072 They need a time limit on these interactive performance art events. 1.2791 0.08370 43 33 8 2
1073 Maybe I gave him the wrong directions. 1.2778 0.08555 36 27 8 1
1074 Do you think he started at my age? 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1075 I'm sure not going to be stuck in a dead-end job when I grow up. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1076 He won't get far on foot. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1077 Mr. Connors could really use a sabbatical. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1078 Dad volunteered for the global warming.display 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1079 It is incomplete without an oasis 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1080 Promise me you won’t let me become him. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1081 Aw great, Dad's been watching Bear Grylls again. 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1082 He's training for the Saharathon. 1.2759 0.08447 29 21 8 0
1083 He should have turned left at Albuquerque. 1.2759 0.08447 29 21 8 0
1084 Oh look a Californian 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1085 Mom said that he fell off his wagon . 1.2759 0.08447 29 21 8 0
1086 I thought we were the ones with the vivid imagination? 1.2759 0.08447 29 21 8 0
1087 The cat takes less time. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1088 This looked more appealing on Pintrest. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1089 Why does your dad keeps saying, ‘Vacation, vacation’? 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1090 Either we ride him like a pony, or our playdate is ruined. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1091 He was a liberal arts major. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1092 He's a cross between Up on the Roof and Under the Boardwalk 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1093 Unfortunately, he's headed straight for the concrete jungle. 1.2759 0.08447 29 21 8 0
1094 If he bothers you, just tell him you're a mirage. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1095 Does your dad also insist on sifting through the sand for syringes and condoms before letting you play? 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1096 Dad, mom says you can come back to bed tonight. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1097 I hope he's not like OUR cat! 1.2759 0.08447 29 21 8 0
1098 He says he's going to write a book about it 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1099 Are we there yet ? 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1100 Get the hose, otherwise we'll wait all day. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1101 I think he dropped a contact 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1102 I can't stand method actors... 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1103 So that's what a beach bum looks like. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1104 My mom said he lost his favorite shovel in there 28 years ago. 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1105 I think the oasis is on the next building. 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1106 Mom says you can come back inside now. 1.2759 0.12051 29 24 2 3
1107 It's that stupid Foreign Legion diet. 1.2759 0.08447 29 21 8 0
1108 Harold's inclined to think inside the box. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1109 I hope he doesn't think he's a cat or were gonna have a mess on our hands. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1110 It's his way of showing empathy for our relatives in California 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1111 Wow, MOMA really needs to start screening these performance pieces better. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1112 He hasn't been the same since Mom had him neutered. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1113 Mandatory survival training for the new corporate culture. 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1114 I really hope we don't have to use this shovel and pail. 1.2759 0.08447 29 21 8 0
1115 After inventing the Lap Pool, I started working on a Lap Desert. 1.2759 0.09797 29 22 6 1
1116 Poor guy. He's from Flint, Michigan. 1.2759 0.10982 29 23 4 2
1117 Doesn't he know this is an urban oasis? 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1118 He asked for water but we're out of sparkling. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1119 Maybe we should tell him we found his camel yesterday. 1.2727 0.08996 33 25 7 1
1120 He's getting in touch with his inner Israelite. 1.2727 0.09993 33 26 5 2
1121 Still searching for the offshore tax shelters. 1.2727 0.07873 33 24 9 0
1122 I think he needs unstructured play more than us. 1.2703 0.08355 37 28 8 1
1123 You have to admire the preparation Day-Lewis puts into a role. 1.2703 0.08355 37 28 8 1
1124 Aren't these Foreign Legion flashbacks getting just a bit tiresome? 1.2703 0.08355 37 28 8 1
1125 Growing up is overrated. 1.2692 0.10463 26 20 5 1
1126 I don't feel like playing this anymore. 1.2692 0.10463 26 20 5 1
1127 At least his pants are on. 1.2692 0.11842 26 21 3 2
1128 It's just a mirage. 1.2692 0.08871 26 19 7 0
1129 This so doesn't make up for running over our cat. 1.2692 0.10463 26 20 5 1
1130 How old do you have to be to know you're too old for a second childhood? 1.2692 0.08871 26 19 7 0
1131 He's the guy from all those New Yorker cartoons. 1.2692 0.13077 26 22 1 3
1132 I didn't think we'd get to advanced groveling until we went for our MBAs. 1.2692 0.11842 26 21 3 2
1133 Thinking outside the sandbox was never his strong suit. 1.2692 0.11842 26 21 3 2
1134 He's searching for lost youth. Or maybe a contact lens. 1.2692 0.10463 26 20 5 1
1135 It's performance art. This one is called "Plight of the Liberal Republican." 1.2692 0.08871 26 19 7 0
1136 I don't know what he's looking for, but I don't wanna be here when he finds it! 1.2683 0.07828 41 31 9 1
1137 It's O.K. Mom told him there was a bottle of Stoli buried in there. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1138 He's looking for his lump sum distribution 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1139 Oh, you thought I said dessert? 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1140 Sandbox nothin'. It's a shelter for New York's homeless, donated by Saudi Arabia. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1141 I say he's a mirage. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1142 Should we just tell him where he left his wallet? 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1143 It was either this or a lap pool. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1144 With the new round of cutbacks, he better start thinking outside the box. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1145 He needs to learn to think outside the sandbox. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1146 He's in training for a mid-level management position. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1147 More sustainable than a wave pool, but he's absolutely flattened after his workout. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1148 He's going through his T.E. Lawrence stage. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1149 Is this what the future holds? 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1150 I prefer to refer to our study as a thirst for knowledge. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1151 It's the latest fitness craze from L.A.: They call it the Global Warming Workout. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1152 It used to be fun when we were young. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1153 That's what we get to do when we grow up 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1154 Since when is this playground paleo? 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1155 If we're ever going to sell the place, we need to just paint over the damn thing. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1156 Something about his lost childhood! 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1157 He never really came back from the Sahara. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1158 He says it helps him think. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1159 Dad’s a great believer in preconditioning. He’s been doing this every day since he was told that the company’s transferring us to California. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1160 Day 16: I'm not going home without that wedding ring. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1161 This, Jeffery, is the proverbial Sandman I've read about. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1162 He needs a small palm tree to make it more realistic. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1163 He wouldn't move so they built the building around him. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1164 I've never seen anybody flunk Sandbox that many times. I got it on the first try! [Italicize that] 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1165 I thought our tickets were for Cats, the musical? 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1166 He mumbled something about losing his horse with no name. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1167 First the feral cats, now this. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1168 His Coney Island childhood; so near, yet so far. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1169 After he has a few--He comes up here and puts his handprints in his Hollywood Boulevard Walk of game. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1170 It's the only place left in the city that is smoking friendly. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1171 That guy needs to learn to drink outside the box 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1172 DSM-5. Early childhood sandbox deprivation. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1173 It's a new workout. I think he's on his last lap. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1174 He's recreating Lawrence of Arabia; he'll be done in a hour or two. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1175 I hate these method actors. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1176 He says his GPS is not working. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1177 He went gluten-free three hours ago. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1178 The times of sands are running out. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1179 Dad, can you stop surviving, so we can play? 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1180 If he still has his wallet, I see an opportunity here. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1181 Wanna bury him? 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1182 Maybe it's true that the age of adulthood keeps going up. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1183 Show some respect, the man wrote Pet Sounds. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1184 Maybe he's the Sandman... 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1185 He came with the desert sand. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1186 It's still more fun than the endless pool. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1187 Dad's really into method acting right now. 1.2667 0.11679 30 25 2 3
1188 Lucky for for him - its slow sand. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1189 Get your own sand box if you want to play Lawrence of Arabia! 1.2667 0.11679 30 25 2 3
1190 And I call THIS installation, "Daddy Needs Another Drink." 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1191 .. and that's why we're glad we didn't grow up in the 60s. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1192 Someone stole his zen garden 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1193 The catalog says this one is 'Sahara at Noon,' $22,500. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1194 Bob needs to learn to drink outside the box. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1195 I am so telling his mom. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1196 Camel lot 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1197 Reliving your childhood is a young man's game. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1198 A selfie would sober him up. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1199 I've always said that one man's mirage is just another man's déjà vu. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1200 I think he's practicing for a cartoon. 1.2667 0.11679 30 25 2 3
1201 He's been lost in that sandbox a long time. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1202 So lap pools are out? 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1203 He's been there for 3 days. I think he's lost his marbles. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1204 I told him to look for the needle in the HAYSTACK! 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1205 I wish he would practice his Bikram-Crossfit somewhere else 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1206 Some folks aren't cut out for urban living. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1207 There’s going to be trouble when the cat finds him in there 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1208 He should see the oasis any second now. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1209 Three consecutive days of mom's tuna casserole and dad thinks he's a cat. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1210 He's really serious about this new Castaway diet plan. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1211 This happens every time the cost of gold goes up. 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1212 He's gonna need a bigger desert. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1213 The irony is that this is happening at The Mirage Hotel. 1.2667 0.08212 30 22 8 0
1214 It's close to lunchtime and he's still not thinking out of the box.... 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1215 I think we should go back to 'talk therapy'. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1216 It's a section of the Urban Wasteland Trail. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1217 How about we sculpt a glass of water? 1.2667 0.09509 30 23 6 1
1218 Poor Fred thinks he's auditioning for Cats again. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1219 He used to develop drought resistant seeds for Monsanto, now he's just insane and in my way. 1.2667 0.10649 30 24 4 2
1220 He just doesn't grasp the concept of manscaping. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
1221 Ya think he'll get out if we put the cat in with him? 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
1222 The new communal restrooms suck. 1.2647 0.08764 34 26 7 1
1223 Let's help get to the bottom of this. 1.2632 0.08992 38 30 6 2
1224 Don't worry, Dad's just feelin' the Bern. 1.2632 0.10455 38 32 2 4
1225 That's why I don't wear contacts. 1.2593 0.08594 27 20 7 0
1226 Well, this rooftop amenity needed more square footage. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1227 I don't have the heart to tell him that's the buildings' litter box 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1228 This is the last summer we stay in the city. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1229 The worst part of owning a human. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1230 Fetch a pail of water. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1231 We could put sand in his pants. 1.2593 0.12623 27 23 1 3
1232 Should we build an oasis instead of a castle? 1.2593 0.08594 27 20 7 0
1233 He's less trouble than Mrs. Thompson's cat. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1234 Now it's considered an "artisan micro-desert." 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1235 I used to love summer. 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1236 Is this one of those "see your future" moments? 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1237 I'd suggest just buying a new contact lens. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1238 He's in therapy, trying to regain his childhood. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1239 He's taking the hands-on approach too literally. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1240 My dad is Method. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1241 Thinking inside the box is so underrated. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1242 I don't wanna play with him. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1243 This might be our most lively sand castle yet. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1244 He can't get out of the sand in golf either. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1245 Should we set up the sprinkler? 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1246 Kindergarten PTSD, really it's a thing! 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1247 It looks like Dad confused his medical medication with the catnip again. 1.2593 0.08594 27 20 7 0
1248 They ran out of bonsai trees so he went with the mini desert. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1249 Are you seeing this or is this one of those mirages I've heard about? 1.2593 0.08594 27 20 7 0
1250 My Dad did this once in our backyard sandbox. Now he lives at the Red Roof Inn near the airport. 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1251 Let's cut him some slack. He's probably just retired. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1252 I'll be out as soon as I find my cat 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1253 I wish he'd go back to the wading pool. 1.2593 0.08594 27 20 7 0
1254 And you thought it was a cat. 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1255 So sad, this is where he discovers it's only a mirage 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1256 He's looking for his raison d etre. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1257 Does he know it's only for cats? 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1258 Think he'd mind if we jumped in? 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1259 It must be a case of arrested development. 1.2593 0.08594 27 20 7 0
1260 Poppa, I'm going to ignore, for the moment, the pail, and the shovel, and the sandbox you apparently think is a wasteland, and just point out that you seem to have a sans serif 'S' floating over your head. 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1261 He said it's the latest physical fitness craze, Death Valley Crawl. 1.2593 0.08594 27 20 7 0
1262 Can't explore the Gobi on a teacher's pay, dude! 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1263 I don't know what you've been feeding the cat, but we need to get to the vet as soon as possible. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1264 Not "contract", "contact." He's upset because he lost a contact. 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1265 Whew! He's Lawrence of Arabia, today. Since he's not Felix the Cat, we won't need the shovel and pail, after all. 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1266 It's for my report on the California drought. I believe in hyperrealism. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1267 I heard you were never supposed to wake up a Sleep Crawler. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1268 He's paid to check for needles. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1269 Why don't we just bury him up to the neck. 1.2593 0.08594 27 20 7 0
1270 Now lets see how he reacts to a bucket of dry ice 1.2593 0.11439 27 22 3 2
1271 He also failed "Rithmetic". 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1272 Dude!? This is our beach. 1.2593 0.10117 27 21 5 1
1273 Try giving him your juice box. 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
1274 Shouldn't we tell Mommy? 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
1275 I thought desert cross training was just a fad too until my dad replaced my sandbox with a crawlmaster 5000. 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
1276 Fair's fair. He got here first. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
1277 "If we bury a Metro Card, maybe he'll move on to Coney Island". 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
1278 By the time he finds the nickel he lost, it will only be worth a penny and a half. 1.2581 0.07989 31 23 8 0
1279 Please tell me that this is just another mirage. 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
1280 And here he is, 'Midway on our life's journey.' 1.2581 0.10336 31 25 4 2
1281 It's cat scratch fever. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
1282 Just shout "There's a parking space at Trader Joe's!" and the sandbox is ours. 1.2581 0.11329 31 26 2 3
1283 I'd have waited till sundown. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
1284 During tax season this is the closest to the shore he ever gets. 1.2581 0.09237 31 24 6 1
1285 I told you it wasn't a good idea to bury Dad's Adult Channel pin number. 1.2571 0.08543 35 27 7 1
1286 Excuse me sir, we reserved this sandbox for this time. 1.2571 0.08543 35 27 7 1
1287 I told you not to invite Lawrence. 1.2558 0.07510 43 33 9 1
1288 He just totally misses the concept of manscaping. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1289 He's going for the Guinness World Record for the longest Pub Crawl. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1290 Mother says its imperfect, but he does keep the cats out. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1291 Johnson never could think outside the box. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1292 I guess no man really is an island 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1293 He identifies as catwoman , she legally can use this as a litter box . 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1294 wine...wine... 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1295 Sure he's listening to his inner child, but his adult is so big! 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1296 Isn't that his contact lens on the sidewalk? 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1297 Your dad is so 'method'. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1298 Well, this is as close to the beach as I'm ever going to get. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1299 So this is what you meant when you said beach day... 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1300 Performance art my ass, I want the sandbox! 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1301 The Corporate Litterbox 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1302 Trust him, he knows a shortcut. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1303 My mom says this is what’s called “imaginative play.” My dad is acting out his search for meaning. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1304 Three more days, and he gets the promotion. 1.2500 0.09029 24 18 6 0
1305 I think he's having trouble thinking outside the sandbox. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1306 He comes here to practice. He's going to a casting call for a role in a cartoon in The New Yorker. 1.2500 0.14281 20 17 1 2
1307 He asked me how far Malibu was. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1308 I remember hiding my lunch money in here. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1309 I guess you have to do more than think outside the box. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1310 Dad? 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1311 I think he's looking for his dignity. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1312 Performance art, my ass. He's looking for the Xanax he dropped up here during our playdate yesterday. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1313 It's my Ben garden. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1314 He says he won't stop until he finds his contact lens. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1315 He always wanted his own private beach. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1316 It's his annual Passover reenactment. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1317 He's always losing his keys. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1318 He'd better start thinking outside the box. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1319 Show him the oasis. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1320 On the internet, nobody cares if you're a cat. But here? It matters .... 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1321 He was laid off weeks ago, but by law, they can't physically remove him. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1322 I guess we could make him an oasis. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1323 Mom said the Condo Board made him get rid of his camel. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1324 In a previous life he was Lawrence of Arabia. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1325 Are you seeing that too? 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1326 Dad Got kicked out of hot yoga for being too dramatic. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1327 He's trying to adapt to global warming. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1328 Method actor. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1329 He still digs his early years. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1330 Dad! Can you practice your part for your theater group's play somewhere else? 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1331 We should check the pool. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1332 He was a terrapin, yesterday. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1333 Mr. Drysdale, you said the desert study wouldn't get in the way of recess! 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1334 Mr. Martin has a dry sense of humor. 1.2500 0.08980 32 25 6 1
1335 Take Your Dad to Play Day is just wrong. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1336 You know there is no coming back when they mistake the sandbox for the litter box. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1337 I't's titled 'Man Seeking Lost Youth' 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1338 I'd lend a hand BUT he looks Syrian. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1339 Oh we must be early, he’s usually only here until the bar next door opens 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1340 He's been playing in there for a long time. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1341 He said our turn would come after graduate school. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1342 Well, he did say he wanted an 'Oasis in the City'. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1343 Looks like we got the pick of the litter box again. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1344 It's his safe space. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1345 Will he figure out New York is just a mirage? 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1346 He claims to be the sole surviving investor in 'Ishtar.' 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1347 His first choice was a lap pool. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1348 I don't want to play "Death Valley" today. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1349 Better him than the cat. 1.2500 0.10851 24 19 4 1
1350 Court is in recess. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1351 You got to crawl before you can walk! 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1352 He really needs to think outside the box. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1353 He's taking all the fun out of it for me. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1354 Just another old guy trying to navigate the social media of a younger generation. 1.2500 0.12199 28 24 1 3
1355 Dad looks dry, must be time for happy hour. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1356 Are we just a mirage? 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1357 It's called a "Man Box." 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1358 That's what repeating kindergarten eight times will do to you. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1359 I hate actors. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1360 I heard free range sandboxes are really trending among city dwellers. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1361 We should have gotten a puppy. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1362 and for a mere $5.2M, you can get this motorized infinity desert installed on your private deck. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1363 This is the closest he's gotten all week. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1364 You can take a bum off the beach... 1.2500 0.10999 32 27 2 3
1365 Grown-ups have trouble thinking outside the box. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1366 The buzzards are here. How much longer for recess? 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1367 Early fascination with Lawrence of Arabia. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1368 They say he never could think outside the box. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1369 Well my father's nervous breakdown is off the charts compared to yours. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1370 Dad really needs a vacation! 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1371 I wish I had his stamina. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1372 He leaves at 3:30 when happy hour starts. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1373 I preferred it when the only thing that caused us alarm was the orange tabby. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1374 He's training to be in the New Yorker. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1375 Should we tell him this is not the little stretch of beach he's worked for all his life? 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1376 Can't get past being voted off the island on the next-to-last show. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1377 Adults are so dramatic! There's a drinking fountain on the other side of the playground! 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1378 Not an other conceptual artist! 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1379 You think this really is an episode on SURVIVOR? 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1380 It's an installation called 'Lawrence of Bronxville.' 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1381 It's so irritating that he is totally unaware that we have the sand box reserved from 3pm to 4pm every Thursday. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1382 My dad's humor is quite dry. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1383 He's getting in the practice he needs to run for a high office. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1384 Hey Mister, that's not the zen box. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1385 I call this one, "Journey to the corner office." 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1386 He's practicing for his move to southern California 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1387 Why does he seek an oasis when there are drinking fountains on every floor? 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1388 Who's he calling a mirage? 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1389 Bear Grylls, he is not. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1390 It's Uncle Biff's day two on the wagon. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1391 So much for his hypothesis that it was easier than a haystack. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1392 I’d call the authorities, but I don’t want to make waves. 1.2500 0.09237 36 29 5 2
1393 How long do we wait for him not to get there? 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1394 Mittens kicked him out of her cat box. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1395 He appears every morning but if you try to get closer, he vanishes. " 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1396 I blame myself. I asked Dad to read me some Camus at bedtime, and the next day he quit CrossFit and started calling this his infinity sandbox. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1397 "I don't care WHAT his Rabbi taught him - I don't think he can keep this up for 40 years". 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1398 Of course I'd love it if he'd leave our sandbox, but right now our main concern should be the camel he had with him last week. 1.2500 0.08333 36 28 7 1
1399 My mom says he's having a midlife water crisis. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1400 It's an endless sandbox, the latest in regression therapy exercise. 1.2500 0.08333 28 21 7 0
1401 Maybe he's just rehearsing for an audition in Hot Cat in a Sand Box on a Tin Roof. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1402 I saw this once on the nature channel. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1403 Just another busted-ass baby boomer looking for his youth. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1404 When mom puts him out, dad prefers the cat's box to the dog's house. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1405 I'm starting to think you're right. Let's get on the swings. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1406 He showed up yesterday asking about water. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1407 He's been trying to get to the infinity pool. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1408 Third day without water. I suppose we should fill the bucket. 1.2500 0.11061 28 23 3 2
1409 Sweet Jesus, let it just be a furball this time. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1410 He says it's more of an existential thirst. 1.2500 0.09793 28 22 5 1
1411 He actually had a pretty nice jungle gym setup before '08. 1.2500 0.12199 28 24 1 3
1412 He's practicing for a desert island Reality TV show. 1.2424 0.09761 33 27 4 2
1413 He's been watching too many Humphrey Bogart movies. 1.2424 0.08737 33 26 6 1
1414 Can you please just go buy some new contact lenses, Dad?!! 1.2424 0.09761 33 27 4 2
1415 I told my dad my school is an intellectual desert. he's trying to relate. 1.2424 0.08737 33 26 6 1
1416 #3 "Human Cigarette Butt in the Sun" 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1417 No, if we give him some water, he'll only want to stay. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1418 The struggle is real… 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
1419 He won't leave until we bring him Evian. 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
1420 We can't, HR told me that's ageism 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1421 The cat poop's not a mirage, either. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1422 he claims he is Very close to finding that 300 million dollar lottery Ticket. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1423 He's living the metaphor. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1424 I don't want a pet cat anymore. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1425 I told him we buried $3 in change. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1426 Dad thinks he may have lost his inner child somewhere around here. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1427 But he still hasn't found what he's looking for. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1428 Careful. He may not be a mirage. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1429 How long do you think he has been trapped in there? 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
1430 He looks a little deserted 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
1431 This looks like a scene right out of a New Yorker cartoon. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1432 Poor guy. Apparently he walked before he crawled. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1433 The boss is extremely detail-oriented. Bob misspelled dessert on his lunch order. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1434 He says it's organic and gluten-free. 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
1435 There's a water fountain in the building. 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
1436 I hear that they rejected his application to be on "Survivor". He hasn't been the same since. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1437 Mirage space is at a premium. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1438 He seems a bit lost. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1439 Hey Mister, the oasis is over on 53rd St. 1.2414 0.08087 29 22 7 0
1440 Another "red wine drinker" that thinks he's in shape. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1441 Grown-ups are so overdramatic. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1442 Should we go on the swings instead? 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1443 He's always been prone to exaggeration. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1444 It's what happens if you don't move on. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1445 My Dad struggles with unstructured play time. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1446 Your dad is truly the worst desert explorer ever. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1447 Wait, I thought the cat had it on Thursdays. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1448 Our sandbox is now an endless desert survival spa. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1449 GO! GO! You're almost there! 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1450 You know what, Dave? I think you should consider therapy. 1.2414 0.09488 29 23 5 1
1451 We suggest you try some out-of-the-box thinking. 1.2414 0.10708 29 24 3 2
1452 It's an Infinity Sand Pit, set to replicate our current electoral process. 1.2400 0.08718 25 19 6 0
1453 He's obviously not thinking outside the box. 1.2400 0.10456 25 20 4 1
1454 He keeps singing that he's from a town called 'Margaritaville' and he's looking for his salt shaker. Some woman with tattoos lost it. 1.2400 0.11944 25 21 2 2
1455 How long has your dad been training for the Sahara marathon? 1.2400 0.11944 25 21 2 2
1456 He's a cat person. 1.2400 0.10456 25 20 4 1
1457 This exhibit is called "California Drought, 2015" 1.2400 0.06101 50 38 12 0
1458 He just doesn't have time for beach weekends since the promotion. 1.2381 0.11761 21 17 3 1
1459 You've heard of quicksand? Well...this is the other kind. 1.2353 0.09496 34 28 4 2
1460 Try stinking outside the box, mister! 1.2353 0.08506 34 27 6 1
1461 He does the whole Zen thing way better than us. 1.2353 0.10392 34 29 2 3
1462 His hypnotist told him he was a cat. 1.2353 0.13638 17 14 2 1
1463 It's the latest military-style workout routine. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
1464 So where do the cats go? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
1465 It's the improv comedian from 2B. Whatever you do, don't shout 'cat.' 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
1466 One of these years he is sure to pass Sandbox 101. 1.2333 0.10376 30 25 3 2
1467 We can't just leave him high and dry. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
1468 Do you think he'll ever get tired of playing lost in the desert? 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
1469 He's still looking for the palm tree. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
1470 I'm not comfortable playing through. 1.2333 0.09202 30 24 5 1
1471 Introducing feline genetics may have unintended side effects. 1.2308 0.12779 26 23 0 3
1472 I don't know, he said something about looking for water. 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1473 He was a lot more fun before he stopped drinking. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1474 Has there ever been more of an #NYCpersonproblem than a homeless man in your rooftop sandbox? 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1475 Are you sure you asked Dad for a front loader not a freeloader? 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1476 Even after all these years, it's still his favorite place to play. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1477 He's looking for an oil field. 1.2308 0.12779 26 23 0 3
1478 Once he finds his camel, he'll leave. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1479 We need an adult in the sandbox like a fish needs a bicycle. 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1480 Did he find his contact lens yet? 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1481 Pay attention kids it's called "Performance Art". 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1482 The millennials have taken over the neighborhood. 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1483 He says he getting in shape to be on "Survivor" 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1484 He never did learn to play well in the sandbox. 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1485 It's a mirage 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1486 I don't think he lives in our building. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1487 Should I tell him that "money pit" was just a metaphor? 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1488 His youth is just a mirage 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1489 He's really taking this new cat litter research to new heights? 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1490 Last time he stayed lost until I built him an oasis. 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1491 I told you that the Baby-boomers just won't leave the sandbox. 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1492 My inner child demands attention. 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1493 I say we wait till he drops and bury him. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1494 I think they call it 'failure to launch' 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1495 It's penance he does for not winning a cartoon caption contest in some magazine. 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1496 I guess he's working up a thirst. 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1497 Are you sure you want to go back to thinking inside the box? 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1498 I distinctly recall the realtor's promise to reserve Tuesdays for our unit!" 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1499 Things haven't been the same here since they started having method acting class downstairs. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1500 I've lost my marbles! 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1501 It started when he sold a cartoon to The New Yorker. 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1502 The sands of time have caught up with old Barney 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1503 Watch out for the big clumps of sand. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1504 But if we're a mirage does that mean we don't get our juice boxes? 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1505 He still has 10 more years of wandering before it's our turn. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1506 The rule is: Adults Only - after 9PM. 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1507 And here we have the modern day stay-at-home dad. 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1508 That reminds me; we booked you in 'coach' to your meeting on Thursday. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1509 If you build it, they will crawl. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1510 He has trouble seeing the big picture. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1511 Maybe he'll leave if we tell him there's a water cooler in the lobby. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1512 Why do adults always sweat the small stuff? 1.2308 0.08427 26 20 6 0
1513 I understand he's working on a sequel to "Lawrence of Arabia." 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1514 Mom says he's an artist. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1515 Age discrimination can be a good thing. 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1516 He knows Manhattan isn't a desert island, right? 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1517 It's the neighborhood's first infinite sand box. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1518 Should we call animal control? 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1519 Adults. They just can't think outside the sandbox. 1.2308 0.11513 26 22 2 2
1520 Raymond always seems to find the worst in everything. 1.2308 0.10088 26 21 4 1
1521 He claims that he is, "Catman." 1.2286 0.08287 35 28 6 1
1522 if things go as planned , that's where I hope to be in thirty years 1.2273 0.11266 22 18 3 1
1523 And this piece is called 'Matt on a Hot Tin Roof.' " 1.2273 0.11266 22 18 3 1
1524 I heard that he was voted off Survivor in the first episode. 1.2273 0.09145 22 17 5 0
1525 This is our newest intern, Doug. 1.2273 0.11266 22 18 3 1
1526 I hear they call him Lawrence of the Bronx. 1.2273 0.13046 22 19 1 2
1527 Should we tell him his pants are on backwards? 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
1528 We should tell him the oasis is in the next sand box over. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
1529 Great motivation to do all my homework. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
1530 This is the latest thing since waterboarding: we make them believe they are in the desert with NO water. We call it waterhoarding. 1.2258 0.08932 31 25 5 1
1531 kids...I'm gonna need a few more minutes in here. I know my sanity is under here somewhere! 1.2258 0.10064 31 26 3 2
1532 He really needs to grow up. 1.2258 0.10064 31 26 3 2
1533 When he finds water, should we tell him about the cat? 1.2250 0.08388 40 33 5 2
1534 It works out perfectly, Amanda. The homeless need a place to defecate, and I have a need to pick up human feces with my flyswatter. 1.2222 0.12924 18 15 2 1
1535 Is this the same guy who was hogging it last week? 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1536 Back with more thinking inside a box after this... 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1537 Believe me dad, right now I wish I was just a mirage. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1538 Does your uncle still have that pet vulture ? 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1539 He's been hired to star in the remake of Ishtar. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1540 Screw those kids. I own the building. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1541 Uh oh, I think Daddy's been watching 'Ishtar' again. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1542 Of course he doesn't play with others. He's a congressman. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1543 We may be here awhile - he keeps losing count. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1544 I think he's training for "desert survivor." 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1545 You're right. I suppose cats would be worse. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1546 Guy in 14C. He binge-watches castaway movies. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1547 Says he lost his phone. Can't get out without GPS. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1548 He's our first rooftop crop. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1549 We don't want to play deserted island again, Louis. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1550 Dad, we played 'stranded in the desert' the past two days. Can we play something else now? 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1551 Thinking outside the box has never been his strong point. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1552 He's reliving that desert experience. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1553 Should we tell him there's lead in the water? 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1554 Definitely some separation issues still exist 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1555 It's just my dad. He's a performance artist. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1556 Past life regression's convinced him he's a French legionnaire. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1557 Maybe next time he'll think twice about taking someone's clearly labeled yogurt. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1558 Maybe I don't want to be a teacher when I grow up. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1559 He never should have tried to cross without a juice box. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1560 My dad is working on a new kind of hot yoga. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1561 I sure hope he know the difference between a sandbox and a litter box. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1562 Dad believes he's invented the bikram yoga version of the endless lap pool. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1563 We've been out-imaginationed by a grownup. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1564 We have to wait for him to finish his business, then we can play in the sandbox. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1565 How long WERE you in timeout? 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1566 It's like a treadmill. But with sand. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1567 I hope he finds his mind. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1568 I'm over the whole repurposing thing. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1569 Should we tell him that we found a contact lens there yesterday or just enjoy watching him? 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1570 Trust me, fracking is no longer glamorous 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1571 He's supposedly one of the top sand artists in the country although I have my doubts. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1572 Next week we'll mountain climb on the HVAC unit. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1573 I hope this isn't going to be like when that cat was living here. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1574 Renting our sand box was a great idea. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1575 Preparing for the apocalypse is a very personal thing. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1576 He calls it his sad box. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1577 And you thought that camel last week was strange. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1578 We're trying ashtray aversion therapy to cure his smoking habit. If that doesn't work, we'll show him photos of Bette Davis at eighty. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1579 He just doesn't understand sandboxes. 1.2222 0.08078 36 29 6 1
1580 I think our Crossing the Border Simulation will be sure to speak to Trump supporters. 1.2222 0.12327 27 24 0 3
1581 Mom insists this is healthier for us than computer games. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1582 He's from the method acting school next door. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1583 Meow. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1584 Catman is always like this the week before Comic Con. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1585 Fast learner. He may be ready to lose all hope in a real desert as soon as next week. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1586 Oh that's just my imaginary friend the English Patient 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1587 Welcome to the world of the one percent. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1588 I call it 'Soul of Wall Street.' 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1589 My dads been watching global warming preparedness videos on YouTube. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1590 He's calling it the Crusoe diet. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1591 He said his life is like a cartoon, and he's not getting out till he's captioned. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1592 Looks like we may need to repurpose our pail and shovel. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1593 He said something about doing the last thing on his bucket list. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1594 Maybe he'll get the idea if we switch to another brand of litter. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1595 Living around theatre people is exhausting. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1596 Kind of regretting taking Dad to a buffet, yesterday. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1597 I call it 'Adulthood.' 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1598 Littering: the punishment fits the crime. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1599 Say what you want but I think his art has taken on a new level of pertinence. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1600 Why, thank you! It took all day and $50 to complete; I call it "A Realist's Surrealist's Life in the Age of Global Warming". 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1601 Feel the Bern! 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1602 Is this our future? 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1603 Any desert is sprawling, if you remain stationary 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1604 For those clients who cannot swim, we offer the Endless Desert option. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1605 Word is, he didn't graduate pre-school. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1606 Your son's really advanced for a 2 year old. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1607 If you build it, they will come. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1608 He keeps saying, 'Vodka Tonic, Vodka Tonic.' Any idea what that is? 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1609 Not sure just water is going to do it. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1610 First the cats were wrecking my fun and now this. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1611 My parents decided that I should learn about empathy for the downtrodden, so they hired a performance artist. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1612 He's lost without the metal detector. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1613 My dad is trying to give up smoking so I hid his cigarettes in my sandbox. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1614 He always takes so long to decide where to go. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1615 After seeing 'Lawrence of Arabia,' he was never quite the same. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1616 He's getting in shape for his trip to Death Valley. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1617 Incentives make filming within the city a good deal. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1618 Bad behavior or performance art? 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1619 He's not going to....... Oh no, please! Not in our sandbox! 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1620 It's a dramatic reenactment of the day his student loans were paid off. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1621 It's our " Roofhampton " amenity. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1622 He left a dead mouse on the teeter-totter. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1623 We need to start thinking outside the box. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1624 I hate when Dad loses his keys. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1625 Go tell Mom that Dad lost his contacts again. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1626 We should build a wall. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1627 Dad calls this performance art, and I'm supposed to play the vulture. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1628 Can't he just shake a cup with a few coins in it like the other guys do? 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1629 It's Daniel Day-Lewis preparing for a new role. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1630 He's having the illusion of fun. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1631 I told you we should build a road. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1632 How come when we stared at the cute girl in the hot tub she got right out? 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1633 I told you these gender-neutral-human-litter-boxes would be a hit...... 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1634 Well, it looks like hot yoga has run over again. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1635 Every habitat has its unique flora and fauna. 1.2222 0.12327 27 24 0 3
1636 Maybe this is a game we don't want to start playing. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1637 Dad, you know that this could make for a really embarrassing obituary. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1638 We should probably stop letting Mitsy poop in there. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1639 He keeps getting lost. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1640 Proving yet again,'if you build it, he will come.' 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1641 Scrap the castle. I guess we're building an oasis. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1642 Dad does tend to be over dramatic 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1643 I wonder if he knows it's an urban community cat box 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1644 Obviously a portal through time and space... got sunscreen? 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1645 Dad, can we go home now? 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1646 So this is what happens when you think inside the box for too long? 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1647 Coals were to much for him. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1648 Sir. We appreciate your predicament, but please don't pee in our box. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1649 Father was not kidding when he said we were moving to a building he considered an "oasis" right in the heart of Manhattan. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1650 This was so much easier when we just had a cat. 1.2222 0.12327 27 24 0 3
1651 The water tank is not a mirage. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1652 He's been like this ever since Lawrence of Arabia. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1653 He’s been like this since mom put a padlock on the liquor cabinet. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1654 I've always liked Career Day. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1655 I've already suggested that he think outside the box. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1656 Mom says he never did learn to think outside the box. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1657 My father said that he needs to get inside the box to think outside the box. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1658 My mom says he has an overactive imagination. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1659 I think he's about done. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1660 Here we go. Another 'method' actor. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1661 Don't you hate open house night at school. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1662 It's named 'Lost Childhood', but honestly, I just don't get Performance Art. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1663 That vagrant completely destroyed our sandscape! 1.2222 0.12327 27 24 0 3
1664 In his most difficult challenge yet, David Blaine goes thirty days without his smart phone. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1665 He's one of the biggest players on Wall Street. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1666 Enough already! Let's tell him about Uber. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1667 This piece demonstrates how playtime has become a nightmare and should be banned from schools forever. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1668 'Looks like there's a scheduling conflict." 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1669 It's called 'Crossfit.' 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1670 Dad never could think outside the box. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1671 Dad is taking 'Dry January' a bit too far. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1672 He's been like this since Kobe retired. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1673 It used to be a concrete "jungle". 1.2222 0.09007 36 30 4 2
1674 I need a juice box and a copy of Dune, stat. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1675 Mom says I should play outside more. I'm not sure I agree. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1676 Amenities don't include pool or beach but we do have sand and free use of the shovel. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1677 This has to be the worst 4 seconds of my life. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1678 It's the newest rage - 'ship wrecked on a desert island' yoga. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1679 I hope he makes it out soon. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1680 I don't want to hold the shovel. 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1681 See! they never think outside the box 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1682 And I was worried about cats using this sand box. 1.2222 0.11111 27 23 2 2
1683 He's on a pace to break his personal best. 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1684 This is the last time I'm cleaning dad's litterbox 1.2222 0.08153 27 21 6 0
1685 He's auditioning for "Cat in a Litterbox on a Hot Tin Roof". 1.2222 0.09745 27 22 4 1
1686 He'll never find that contact lens. 1.2188 0.08677 32 26 5 1
1687 Buzz off, it's my staycation. 1.2188 0.08677 32 26 5 1
1688 And here we have the performance art piece "All my assets were in Lehman stock" 1.2188 0.07425 32 25 7 0
1689 Shouldn't be long, I'll start digging now. 1.2174 0.10810 23 19 3 1
1690 Hey Mister. It's our turn. 1.2174 0.10810 23 19 3 1
1691 Billy's been hogging this thing for years. 1.2174 0.10810 23 19 3 1
1692 He just moved in. 1.2174 0.10810 23 19 3 1
1693 He says he's looking for a contact lens, but I think it's his misspent youth. 1.2174 0.10810 23 19 3 1
1694 Paul. . .Ryan. . . 1.2174 0.10810 23 19 3 1
1695 I think he's looking for a needle. 1.2174 0.10810 23 19 3 1
1696 He's almost done. He's down to counting his last million grains of sand. 1.2174 0.08794 23 18 5 0
1697 The only thing worse than cats using your sandbox are performance artists. 1.2174 0.08794 23 18 5 0
1698 If we just wait it out, the Angel of Death will take him. 1.2174 0.10810 23 19 3 1
1699 At one inch an hour he should make it by tomorrow. 1.2174 0.12505 23 20 1 2
1700 And I thought we were getting too old to play in the sandbox. 1.2162 0.09598 37 32 2 3
1701 Adults seem to forget how hard it is to toil away in the sandbox all day, but someone's got to do it. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1702 I heard his wife told him to go pound sand. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
1703 You were right. No shoes allowed. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
1704 Ya,he thinks he's cat woman and has to go to the bathroom. 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
1705 Think he'll die soon? 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1706 Higby hasn't been quite right since we went to mouse-less, touch screens. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1707 When he asked for a hot time in the old town tonight, this is the best we could think of. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1708 He says he needs a drink? I don't think so. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1709 The mirage is extra. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1710 My dad says work is like this. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1711 7 days without water, he's amazing! 1.2143 0.08713 42 36 3 3
1712 My dad watches him on TV. He's a stock picker. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1713 He's a member of the Republican establishment. 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
1714 Just another mid life crisis. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1715 He's half-cat on his mother's side. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
1716 I'm not sure what he's after, but he's sure got grit! 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1717 Trust me, I do this all the time. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1718 I hate method actors. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1719 Maybe the cat will show Dad how to use the litter box. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1720 Once you've collected enough sweat and tears, I'll bring you the *other* bucket. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1721 This performance piece is called "Looking for Reasonable Rent". 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1722 Mr Wilkins just hasn't been the same since be broke up with Cat Girl. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
1723 Pei it forward, kids. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1724 No Sis, he did not wash a-shore from a shipwreck. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
1725 Perhaps we're all a mirage. 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
1726 He's a performance artist... whatever the hell that is. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1727 The newest exercise trend: Perpetual Desert. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1728 I hate it when Mr. Smithers gets here first! 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
1729 Most days he's just my dad. Today he's my dad __and__ my science project. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
1730 Cats the musical, deleted scenes. 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
1731 He's here every day rehearsing for that survivor show. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1732 When is the Mayor going to rid our parks and playgrounds of Method Actors? 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
1733 He's suing the co-op board, as they had promised the new sandbox would be Olympic-sized. 1.2143 0.07897 28 22 6 0
1734 Stan falls prostrate after learning he's been voted off the island. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1735 Mom just said nobody's too old for the sandbox. 1.2143 0.07258 42 34 7 1
1736 The Metropolitan Vacation Simulator: experience the getaway you will never have. 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1737 Sometimes he thinks he's a cat. 1.2143 0.10736 28 24 2 2
1738 You still think the class should adopt a hermit crab? 1.2143 0.09424 28 23 4 1
1739 His therapist told him to locate his inner child. 1.2121 0.07227 33 26 7 0
1740 Get out of the sandbox, Gary. We have a meeting in the playpen in 10. 1.2121 0.08436 33 27 5 1
1741 It's a game my dad and I play. We call it "The Climate Denier". 1.2105 0.09609 19 15 4 0
1742 wow, a desert treadmill.. 1.2105 0.07691 38 31 6 1
1743 You know that they haven't changed the sand yet this year, right? 1.2083 0.12007 24 21 1 2
1744 I went out and got a peasant for our castle. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1745 Same guy at the kiddie pool yesterday - I can't begin to tell you... 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1746 Drink outside the box. 1.2083 0.12007 24 21 1 2
1747 The starving sand artist is back. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1748 He once worked in Silica Valley. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1749 How long do you think he's been stranded on that island? 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1750 Oh dear... he's doing his Lawrence of Arabia impersonation again. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1751 To heck with sandbox rules--I say we kick him out for his own good! 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1752 I've learned it's wiser not to contradict my father's fantasies. 1.2083 0.12007 24 21 1 2
1753 Do you think we'll have enough sand to bury him? 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1754 He keeps crying, "I'm SO sorry, Wilson..." 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1755 Clearly, we all need to practice our "out of the box" thinking skills. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1756 Obviously, he is not from our school----look at his school uniform! 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1757 I hope he doesn't think this is a litter box! 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1758 Just 5 more minutes. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1759 Come on Tommy! Mrs. Carlson said we could have our turn like 15 years ago! 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1760 It's tough to see an old actor like Hanks trying to recapture his Glory days. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1761 This guy's been hogging the sandbox for way too long. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1762 Look Dawn. It's a new fossil to add to the collection. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1763 Looks like Lawrence from accounting thinks he's Lawrence of Arabia 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1764 Maybe next time we should try to think outside the box. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1765 I think the teacher is ready for spring break. 1.2083 0.12007 24 21 1 2
1766 Exquisite form, but that attitude is not doing #6 any favors. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1767 At least he left his shirt on this time. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1768 Kids, you will understand when you grow up. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1769 I think he Feels the Bern. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1770 His boss told him to get lost, but he's out of vacation days. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1771 Thanks to him, I no longer worry about my lack of imagination. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1772 He's a model for cartoonists. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1773 10 years later and he's still looking for Wilson. 1.2083 0.12007 24 21 1 2
1774 Textbook post-traumatic sandbox disorder. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1775 He's been that way ever since they canceled Jersey Shore. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1776 He's training for the race against climate change. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1777 My wife is allergic to dogs so we got him. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1778 Dad misses the real challenges of life in Arizona. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1779 Isn't it exciting watching the boss relieve himself of tension in the executive sandbox? I even brought my own spade along for the bailout. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1780 Tell me again why we volunteered to keep the sandbox clean. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1781 Water... water... 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1782 This is the perfect example of why I'm propelled to pursue my interest in evolutionary psychology. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1783 we don't want to be around when he finds that contact lens 1.2083 0.12007 24 21 1 2
1784 He said he lost his shell company 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1785 Is there an app for that? 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1786 Ever since the new version of Lawrence of Arabia was announced, this place has been lousy with method actors. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1787 You know these "method" actors. He heard there were to have auditions for the "Laurence of Arabia" prequel. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1788 He looks a little old to play in the sandbox. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1789 We found him on the Capitol Lawn. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1790 In tonight's episode of "Survivor: Law Firms," the contestants start losing their minds after working another 70-hour week. 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1791 i hope he doesn't have diarrhea this time 1.2083 0.10389 24 20 3 1
1792 Reality TV has now officially sunk to a new low. 1.2083 0.08468 24 19 5 0
1793 The kids wait their turn as Andy looks for his lost shaker of salt. 1.2075 0.07308 53 45 5 3
1794 He's not exactly the dream I asked Mr. Sandman for. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
1795 What do you say..., give me my soul back and we call it even? 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
1796 I heard he doesn't play nice. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
1797 He's a true believer in global warming and he's practicing for it. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
1798 I told him days ago it's our turn. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
1799 He began to worry that his audience wasn't sophisticated enough to understand his performance art. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
1800 he never got over losing a contact lens on the beach 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
1801 I'm not sure whether we need a watering can or an I.V. 1.2069 0.07655 29 23 6 0
1802 The co-op board only allows Lost in the Desert play weekdays between 9am and 5pm. 1.2069 0.09123 29 24 4 1
1803 Do you think he's a late Bloomer? 1.2059 0.08208 34 28 5 1
1804 The mind is a terrible thing to waste. 1.2059 0.09230 34 29 3 2
1805 He prefers to be called an "independent." 1.2059 0.08208 34 28 5 1
1806 I'll call the clinic and see if hitting "sand bottom" counts. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1807 Overcoming feline delusions can be particularly difficult unless the litter box is removed. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1808 This live art exhibit is a new self portrait in the starving artist category.. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1809 He swears his geo-cache led him here... 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1810 At least he's box-trained... 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1811 It hasn't been the same since gentrification. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1812 He keeps saying something about finding his lost youth. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1813 To the insanely persistent go the spoils. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1814 So do we build the Promised Land before or after Moses crosses the desert? 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1815 He told me he was a method cartoonist. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1816 I guess he misses life in L.A.! 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1817 I'll dig the grave, but no sharesies on the wallet. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1818 Don't you think dad's gone a little too far to prove his point about global warming? 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1819 Looks like he's been here awhile, let's find another sandbox! 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1820 He really believes that play teaches a person how to work. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1821 He's doing the Upper-West-Side-Desert-Crawler Workout, followed by an hour in the Jacuzzi. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1822 He's with the French Foreign Legion. 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1823 Don't you just hate it when dad loses his car keys? 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1824 Searching for inner child 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1825 Maybe he's Bernie Sanders. 1.2000 0.14475 15 13 1 1
1826 "No more video games. Fresh air, " she said. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1827 Looks like we may get to bury someone today! 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1828 It's fun to play in the sandbox - just don't dig very deep! 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1829 Wait for the laugh. It's really quicksand. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1830 He says he's training for the Sahara Marathon. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1831 I don't get it, my lawyer said it would safe on Panamanian soil 1.2000 0.11698 20 17 2 1
1832 "Go play outside and quit warping your mind." Yeah, right. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1833 Lost his contact. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1834 He still refuses to think outside our box 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1835 Performance art is two to three. This hour is for open sand. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1836 I call it "Man Or Mirage". 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1837 Maybe we should build him a rooftop oasis. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1838 How do you tell your dad he's not welcome in your sandbox? 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1839 He didn't go to a very good kindergarten. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1840 Thought he'd be outside the box by now. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1841 Dude, I know your dad's upset but, three days looking for a contact lens is just ridonculous! 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1842 I know my dignity is up here somewhere. 1.2000 0.06816 45 37 7 1
1843 I guess it's better then finding a cat in our sandbox. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1844 Hailed best installation artist of 2016 this piece is titled "lost contact lens" 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1845 Damn, chiropractor! 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1846 I'll take him over Mrs. Dickerson's cat any day. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1847 At first, I thought it was funny... but now I'm kind of starting to wonder if we only exist inside his mirage. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1848 Hey buddy, take your perpetual adolescence elsewhere - we have a castle to build 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1849 Next thing you know they will want our coloring books 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1850 You'll see why we brought the pail and spade in a minute. He thinks he's a cat. 1.2000 0.11698 20 17 2 1
1851 He's an experiential learner. Now he'll remember that desert has only one "s". 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1852 It's sort of like a resistence pool for people who like the desert.... 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1853 He's suffering Frustrated Beach Syndrome 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1854 Must be an urban sandman. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1855 Rehearsals for the playlot version of Lawrence of Arabia were not going well. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1856 Adult lap time's over in five minutes. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1857 Sheesh, this guy really doesn't want to share. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1858 Adults take things way too seriously. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1859 Looks like another endless sandbox workout. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1860 This is the not the solution to the ultimate problem that this building needs another bathroom. 1.2000 0.09177 20 16 4 0
1861 If he thinks he's a cat, we will have to play somewhere else. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1862 His infinity pool workout just hasn't been the same since we moved to California. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1863 He doesn't play well in any sandbox 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1864 Pass the pail, I got this one. We have cats 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1865 Sandbox mirage, he thinks he can see his childhood hopes and dreams fulfilled. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1866 New York's latest fitness craze: SandStraggle 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1867 Not again! It's the New Yorker cartoonist who lives downstairs. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1868 Did we forget to water yesterday? 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1869 ''You tell him his therapy session is over.'' 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1870 He's why I'm not allowed to wear contacts. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1871 We better tell Mr. Bickley that "Wilson" is on the playground for recess? 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1872 He thinks he lost his Camels. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1873 He's been doing laps all morning. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1874 Think mom will want him to take a bath tonight 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1875 Mom says it's something to do with his spirit guide 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1876 Can you tell your dad to stop reenacting 'Cast Away'? 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1877 He said last week that he found his ring. But I think he found his calling. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1878 Rough night for the sandman. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1879 He's been acting strange lately; He thinks that we're all part of a mirage. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1880 He knows where the water is. 1.2000 0.07338 40 33 6 1
1881 Who does he think he is, Moses? 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1882 It’s a microclimate thing. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1883 He's been at it for 3 hours now, and I don't have the heart to tell him that I already found his dignity. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1884 It's not a cliche; he says he's doing it ironically. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1885 If you build it, he will come, indeed. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1886 He's looking for the oasis. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1887 Whenever he drinks a lot, he thinks he's a kitty and there goes our sandbox. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1888 I'm not sure . . . He calls it the "desert diet". 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1889 Looks like Gregory finally got his Infinite Desert installed. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1890 He's found a 'road less traveled.' . 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1891 You should see his act when we go to the pool. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1892 We finally got him trained to use the sandbox. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1893 This is what tv shows are really like when zoomed out. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1894 I call it "'Funk'-Shui". 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1895 The executive training program really teaches them to conserve resources. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1896 I heard you can't graduate from daycare without first thinking outside the box. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1897 Forget the sandcastle. Time to set up the lemonade stand. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1898 ''See - that's what looking for your lost childhood looks..." 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1899 We should give him a flare gun. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1900 At least it's not another story about "walking in the snow... up hill... both ways." 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1901 You can take a boy out of the beach, but you can’t take the beach out of a boy! 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1902 He's a Republican strategist in the vast wasteland created by Obama. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1903 That's what happens when you major in economics and environmental science. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1904 He's an editor for New Yorker magazine. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1905 Another successful field test! Notice how our underarm anti-perspirant is working. 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1906 Frank prefers to work on his inner child alfresco. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1907 My mother calls this Sandbox Syndrome. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1908 Do you think this means I can have his iPhone? 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1909 Cat in Litterbox pose 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1910 I hope the mirage is worth it 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1911 I guess it's true...when you grow up you forget how to play. 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1912 Schrodinger's cat-box. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1913 He won't let any of us play ever since his damned pacifier disappeared! 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1914 He's practicing for the Board of Directors meeting next week. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1915 Too much sun really does make you age. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1916 "I guess he hasn't found it yet". 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1917 I don't think he is shovel ready 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1918 Some see a world in a grain of sand: others, not so much. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1919 Auditions for 'The End of the Trail' are next Tuesday. 1.2000 0.07428 30 24 6 0
1920 Huh, I think he's trying to rediscover his inner child ...he just can't find it. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1921 I wish my dad would get over his play-with-your-kid phase. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1922 He appears to be a half-empty kind of guy. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1923 Actually watching paint dry is a lot more interesting. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1924 We should probably find the hypnotist's number. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1925 He has it flown in from Anguilla, each grain triple carbon-filtered for purity and then infused with hints of fecal matter from the Hudson River. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1926 He'd never make it at P.S. 14. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1927 Dad says he's in training for a later cartoon involving a mirage of some kind. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1928 Mister, even I know that's not a haystack. 1.2000 0.09177 20 16 4 0
1929 The guy's just no fun anymore. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1930 It's an Infinity sandbox. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1931 We need to get you home and cleaned up now. Sometimes...I feel like I'm the father. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1932 This Living Art business is getting old. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1933 Dad got fired and has to start all over. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1934 Dad's working to invent a gender neutral bathroom for cats. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1935 I wish he'd start thinking outside the box. 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1936 Grandpa keeps reliving his WW11 beach landing 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1937 ... just can't get dad to think outside the box. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1938 Let him have his moment. Apparently, his son was denied admission to the preschool here. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1939 Look at that turkey on the sand which's there. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1940 The endless pool wasn't a bad idea, but this...? 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1941 I just can't get used to "living sculpture", but I'm glad this one is plein aire. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1942 His regression therapy is really starting to work. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1943 He lost his virginity in that sandbox. 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1944 Dad still can't get over his Human Litter Box idea not getting picked for Shark Tank 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1945 He says we can have it next after he finds his camel. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1946 I hope I don't grow up to be like that one day. 1.2000 0.11698 20 17 2 1
1947 This was my science project, but now I lease it to my friends to torment their fathers. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1948 Steve spends every lunch hour searching for remnants of his youth. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1949 Oh him? He keeps the cats out. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1950 He is taking longer than his turn. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1951 Should we tell him it's a litter box and that we weren't digging for gold? 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1952 I wish he'd go back to his Google playpen and leave our sandbox alone. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1953 OK, I'm telling Mommy. He didn't want my juice box, and he thinks neither of us are real. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1954 Once you've served in the French Foreign Legion, it's in your blood. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1955 Daddy, may I have my lucky penny back now? 1.2000 0.10690 15 12 3 0
1956 When should we tell him it's a mirage? 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1957 You said your Dad's a method actor? 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1958 Uh, sir. Sir! Sandbox rules require a shower before and after entrance. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1959 He told me that he's rehearsing for one of those New Yorker 'guy lost in the desert' cartoons. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1960 As you can see, people are thinking up innovative ways to avoid the beach traffic. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1961 The 'Lawrence of Arabia 2' budget was tight 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1962 Well, it is the best place to look for loose change. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1963 He lost his glasses at the beach last week. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1964 I'd ask him to give me a turn, but I don't think I have that level of commitment. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1965 Relax, we're just a mirage. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1966 He can't afford to vacation in the desert this year. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1967 Looking for Trump's international policy. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1968 You will start out here--as a part of training, we ask every employee to spend one week thinking inside the box. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1969 That's what we have to look forward to. You never escape middle school. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1970 Dad read Proust last night. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1971 Good job Tommy ! 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1972 Things have gotten really weird ever since Chipotle started offering organic LSD as a topping. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1973 Do you think he'll be ready for the Sahara by Monday? 1.2000 0.09177 20 16 4 0
1974 Left my charger at home. 1.2000 0.11547 25 22 1 2
1975 He's auditioning for the movie 'Sahara.' 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1976 This sandbox must be bigger than it looks from the outside. 1.2000 0.10000 25 21 3 1
1977 He's in training for a reality show. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1978 All we need to know we learn in kindergarten… but the sandbox seems to get much tougher later. 1.2000 0.08165 25 20 5 0
1979 Everyone knew he was unelectable. 1.1935 0.08575 31 26 4 1
1980 He just moved from Arizona here to New York City. He says he does this when he gets home sick. 1.1935 0.07213 31 25 6 0
1981 Meet Chad. He claims he's the swing-vote among the Arizona Super-Delegates... 1.1935 0.07213 31 25 6 0
1982 Our access to the box is restricted on a timeshare basis. 1.1935 0.07213 31 25 6 0
1983 So it's true...the myth of the boy whose mother forgot to collect him in 1989. 1.1935 0.07213 31 25 6 0
1984 Hope it's the high end clumping litter! 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
1985 This is our studio sandbox, beautiful view of downtown, and a steal at 2400 a month with first and last plus HOA fee. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
1986 A complete misunderstanding of exfoliate. 1.1923 0.11121 26 23 1 2
1987 It's a Human Resource motivational exercise. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
1988 My dad REALLY misses Malibu. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
1989 Ironic, perhaps, but wouldn’t a bucket and shovel compromise the integrity of his message? 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
1990 Yesterday he told us he actually preferred a desert climate. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
1991 Why is he staring at the pool like it's not really there? 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
1992 Universal Pre-K 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
1993 I don't understand grown-up exercise fads. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
1994 He's prepping for the Death Valley Fun Run. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
1995 Come on, Dad! Our turn! 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
1996 If his hallucinations don't include a finish line, he's apt to be there the rest of the day. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
1997 It works like one of those stationary swim-spas, only without water. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
1998 Dad, there's water in the lobby 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
1999 He never quite recovered after being voted off Sandplay Survivor. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2000 I started with a castle, but I then realized that a performance piece would be more expressive of my deep existential yearning. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2001 I left Google so I wouldn't have to play nice. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2002 In Trump's Tower, it's set up so's we all get four-square meals a day. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2003 They call him the Catnip Cowboy. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2004 Is that Peter O'Toole ? 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2005 He insists that it is his sandbox 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2006 I want to play. Can't we just call him an Uber? 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2007 Last week this was a desert island. 1.1923 0.11121 26 23 1 2
2008 Reality television has hit a new low. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2009 He stopped because he thinks that Pepsi billboard is a mirage. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2010 I thought grown-ups didn't start playing until nighttime. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2011 A job is a job no matter how hard or easy and no matter how dumb you look doing it. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2012 He was there when the sand was delivered. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2013 He says the treadmill is for snobs. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2014 Just another cartoonist workshopping ideas, and pretty hackneyed ones at that. 1.1923 0.11121 26 23 1 2
2015 He came with the Sand 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2016 I can't wait until he goes back to college. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2017 Tell the cinematographer to stick to closeups. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2018 My dad says this kind of thing happened frequently in the days before GPS. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2019 He's hoping to reach an endless oasis. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2020 I don't need to explore my inner child that bad. 1.1923 0.11121 26 23 1 2
2021 Hey mister – this ain't no litter box. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2022 Forget the pail and shovel, how quickly can we build a lemonade stand? 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2023 I call not cleaning the litter box. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2024 Nope, you're still thinking inside the sandbox. 1.1923 0.11121 26 23 1 2
2025 I guess he feels the "Bern". 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2026 Bob is in the early stage of our out-placement process. 1.1923 0.11121 26 23 1 2
2027 The dog house was bad enough! 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2028 I hate it when performance artists find our sandbox. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2029 He's protesting the systematic urbanization of this rooftop 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2030 He's looking for his car keys, I guess. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2031 There's got to be an easier way to do delegate selection. 1.1923 0.11121 26 23 1 2
2032 Dude, your dad needs more screen time. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2033 He's helping us test for a new kitty litter product 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2034 I've been waiting months to have a turn ! 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2035 NIMBY!!! 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2036 The brochure did say a rooftop oasis. 1.1923 0.07882 26 21 5 0
2037 It's a litter box. Trust me. You'll want one after you smell your first zombie poop. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2038 He doesn't look quite the same without the iron man suit. 1.1923 0.09638 26 22 3 1
2039 I think he's too old for the Kindergarten sandbox. 1.1905 0.08781 21 17 4 0
2040 be sure to cover it up when you're done. 1.1905 0.11168 21 18 2 1
2041 Life's not always a beach. 1.1905 0.08781 21 17 4 0
2042 Mr. Sandman is down on his luck. 1.1905 0.08781 21 17 4 0
2043 I wish Dad would grow up. 1.1905 0.08781 21 17 4 0
2044 Maybe WE'RE just a mirage. 1.1905 0.08781 21 17 4 0
2045 He's cut his time almost in half since last week. 1.1905 0.08781 21 17 4 0
2046 And what will he do once he discovers his inner cat? 1.1905 0.08781 21 17 4 0
2047 He's training for the Great Sahara Crossing Race 1.1905 0.11168 21 18 2 1
2048 Learn to think outside the box or you'll end up like me. 1.1905 0.13128 21 19 0 2
2049 I should have rented a camel. 1.1905 0.11168 21 18 2 1
2050 He lost his Rolex. 1.1905 0.11168 21 18 2 1
2051 Somehow I thought lycanthropy would be cooler. 1.1905 0.11168 21 18 2 1
2052 Mom brought him back from Arizona. I think we were both hoping he'd be a better play date. 1.1905 0.11168 21 18 2 1
2053 These new Eco friendly condo amenities need to have time limits 1.1905 0.08781 21 17 4 0
2054 Should we tell him recess is almost over? 1.1905 0.08781 21 17 4 0
2055 Every trader on the floor ultimately goes through it. Pour the bucket of water in his face and he'll snap out of it and the next trader in line will move in and experience his own moment of despondency. 1.1892 0.07591 37 31 5 1
2056 Your dad's not just a helicopter parent; he's a Black Hawk down. 1.1892 0.06528 37 30 7 0
2057 I should tell him his 30 minute limit is up. 1.1892 0.06528 37 30 7 0
2058 He's been this way since they brought him back from the Sahara 1.1875 0.07010 32 26 6 0
2059 You just never know what the tide might bring. 1.1875 0.07010 32 26 6 0
2060 This is our mid-level executive scape-goat program. He gets the water when he agrees to take the blame for the Johnson contract. 1.1875 0.08325 32 27 4 1
2061 He's starting to look like a cigarette. 1.1875 0.09459 32 28 2 2
2062 Al Gore's new sculptures are anything but subtle. 1.1875 0.09459 32 28 2 2
2063 Everyday it's the same -- and we pay the price for their overconfidence 1.1860 0.07629 43 37 4 2
2064 His camel ran off. 1.1852 0.09302 27 23 3 1
2065 You'd think the smell alone would give away the fact that he's in a litter box. 1.1852 0.09302 27 23 3 1
2066 I'm not often a fan of mixed-media, but this has real pathos. 1.1852 0.10725 27 24 1 2
2067 He says he's trying to overcome a traumatic kindergarten sandbox incident. 1.1852 0.10725 27 24 1 2
2068 Supposedly, he once was a brilliant advertising exec. 1.1852 0.09302 27 23 3 1
2069 Mom says its good for dad to get some sun after the separation. 1.1852 0.07618 27 22 5 0
2070 They don't call him the "desert lizard" for nothing. 1.1852 0.07618 27 22 5 0
2071 Isn't that a little too small for a desert? 1.1852 0.07618 27 22 5 0
2072 It's in here somewhere! 1.1852 0.09302 27 23 3 1
2073 He loses half a mill- and he still gets to go first! 1.1852 0.07618 27 22 5 0
2074 Let's hope this is just a phase he's going through. 1.1852 0.07618 27 22 5 0
2075 He aced the wading pool, Sandra, but the sandbox is throwing him for a loop. 1.1852 0.10725 27 24 1 2
2076 He's in search of 'Pi' or the 'Promised Land'; he won't say. 1.1852 0.09302 27 23 3 1
2077 Tell your dad that method acting isn't allowed in the sandbox. 1.1852 0.09302 27 23 3 1
2078 He says he's looking for his "inner child", but I think he's outta of his mind. 1.1852 0.09302 27 23 3 1
2079 Just what this building needs, another method actor. 1.1852 0.09302 27 23 3 1
2080 You put your right hand in. You take your right hand out. 1.1842 0.07405 38 32 5 1
2081 He's been practicing not asking for directions. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2082 Yeah, I don't think dad was paying close attention when the IT guy explained the benefits of sandboxing. 1.1818 0.08089 33 28 4 1
2083 He keeps saying "Wilson!" 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2084 'Before it's too late, maybe tell him we have his pail and shovel?" 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2085 It's sad when you can't go forward. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2086 Hey you said you wanted to do community service 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2087 Remember Donald Trump ?...How the mighty have fallen. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2088 He has illusions of granular. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2089 We better go up the hill and fetch a pail of water. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2090 Looks like daddy came down with cat scratch fever again. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2091 Maybe we should build that fence. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2092 You think he'll want to borrow our pale and shovel? 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2093 He lost his ring at the beach, but this was closer 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2094 I would stand back . . . he thinks he's a cat. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2095 wonder how much he pay for a nice cold glass of lemonade 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2096 He's our new drama teacher 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2097 Art is so strange these days. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2098 Should we tell him it's a mirage so he will leave? 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2099 Should we tell him the inflatable pool is a mirage? 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2100 All these years he can't find his bucket and shovel. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2101 I'll give him another three hours to find an oasis. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2102 Mom says it's his midlife crisis... 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2103 Should we take him to the drinking fountain? 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2104 I hope he doesn't think he's a cat. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2105 Hey, pal, you're not the only person going through a mid-life crisis. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2106 Dad's in training for the next 'Survivor'. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2107 The search is going to be even worse when my dad finds out the dog swallowed my mom's ring. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2108 It's only been two minutes 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2109 He's in a DESert and this is my desSERT. It's a 'homophone'...which isn't what you think! 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2110 Another island vacation trip booked with an expired card. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2111 Mom was upset, but I don't think she meant for him to take it literally. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2112 ... it looks more like you buried his dignity. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2113 That is why I will not wear contacts. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2114 He said something about "All day I've faced the barren waste". 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2115 My Dad watched,'Lawrence of Arabia',again last night! 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2116 This two beat lateral gait performed by harness racing horses is known as the pace. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2117 He washed up here after his mortgage went underwater. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2118 You don't understand performance art. Giving him water will only encourage him. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2119 I guess we'll have to wait to clean the litter box! 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2120 I think I like Dad better when he's on the wagon. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2121 He's looking for spare change. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2122 I think Dad's been on the wagon too long. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2123 We need to make sure you can stay hydrated in this job. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2124 Dad's been training for his upcoming appearance on SURVIVOR--SAHARA. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2125 He still misses Gilligan's Island. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2126 Apparently some programmers take the sandbox concept a tad too literally. 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2127 He says he needs flavored Himalayan sparkling vitamin-enriched water. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2128 It's his one man show of "Cat on a Hot Sand Box". 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2129 It´s title is "A Thirst For Creeping Socialism." 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2130 I don't think our sunscreen is working. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2131 It's like our sandbox has turned into a New Yorker cartoon. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2132 Didn't I tell you it would be the finest artisanal near-death experience in Brooklyn? 1.1818 0.10683 22 19 2 1
2133 What a drama queen. 1.1818 0.08417 22 18 4 0
2134 Good thing we removed the cat turds. 1.1786 0.08988 28 24 3 1
2135 Shall we let our ramp building skills be known? 1.1786 0.08988 28 24 3 1
2136 2-D, he's been trying to get on "Survivor" for years. 1.1786 0.07371 28 23 5 0
2137 He's been doing a real time reenactment of Moses in the desert since his first recess. 1.1786 0.08988 28 24 3 1
2138 Disqualified for the penthouse open on the 9th hole 1.1786 0.08988 28 24 3 1
2139 Just give him tap water. 1.1786 0.08988 28 24 3 1
2140 You can get out of the city without really leaving the city, you know? 1.1786 0.08988 28 24 3 1
2141 Well, my family believes in climate change. 1.1778 0.06582 45 38 6 1
2142 I hope we're not his mirage. 1.1765 0.12820 17 15 1 1
2143 Daddy's still working on a caption. 1.1765 0.07865 34 29 4 1
2144 He was a legionnaire. He's training for a marathon. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2145 No, that's not a mirage. It's an actual coffee shop with WiFi and a public bathroom. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2146 I hope he's not pretending to be a cat. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2147 My mom says it's a new thing dad is trying out: gritty, hungover yoga. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2148 Get little tikes on the phone. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2149 He said he doesn't drink city water. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2150 He's a performance artist from California. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2151 He's in practice they gave him the Sahara desert branch 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2152 He's been taking night classes at the Actor's Studio. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2153 Dad, mom just texted me, "Did your father remember to crawl by Whole Foods for more coconut water?" 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2154 He's been watching too much Survivor. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2155 Take Your Dad to Play Day is kinda dumb. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2156 When is lap time up?? 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2157 This is not cool. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2158 Yeah, it's pretty strange but he says it's equivalent to a run around the park without having to deal with other people. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2159 It took forever to train him. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2160 He likes his martinis very dry. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2161 Well, "Gilligan," I hope they finally rescue you by recess tomorrow. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2162 These new sand molds are so realistic! 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2163 If he passes the endurance test, we'll give him a job at 'The New Yorker' as a cartoonist. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2164 Not very 'Jungian' is it? 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2165 It's my pop. He's in training for one of those reality TV shows. 1.1739 0.12015 23 21 0 2
2166 Mom put him in a time-out after he admitted he voted for Trump in the primary. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2167 I cleaned the litter box yesterday!! 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2168 At least this time he kept his clothes on. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2169 Awkward play dates 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2170 Deluxe model included a fan to simulate snadstorms. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2171 This always happen when he eats Tabbouleh 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2172 He doesn't smell well with others. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2173 It is first on his bucket list. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2174 He says he's on the road to Morocco. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2175 Smelly Cat is back. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2176 Yes, and I thirst for kingdom. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2177 He always does this after he watches "Lawrence of Arabia." 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2178 We can play as soon as he finds his dime. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2179 Call PETA. I think it's an Endangered Species. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2180 It's a new kind of exfoliation. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2181 These pollsters are getting desperate. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2182 Rod Stewart looks like hell these days. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2183 when mommy said he was a golddigger i thought she meant something else 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2184 We're gonna need a bigger shovel. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2185 Seems much more effective than a lap pool. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2186 I still think it could have been a very romantic proposal. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2187 Trump supporters.... They can't see beyond the wall. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2188 His parents just got divorced. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2189 This is an unintended result of extended family leave. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2190 How badly do you want an engagement ring? 1.1739 0.12015 23 21 0 2
2191 Did he say he's looking for his youth or Vermouth? 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2192 He's rehearsing for the Off Broadway production of "Lawrence of Arabia" 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2193 Let's think outside the box. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2194 You ordered Room Service, Sir? 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2195 If daddy doesn't find his contact lens we'll never get to play in the sand. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2196 If we wait around long enough we're going to hear, 'Water, water, everywhere, but not a drop to drink.' 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2197 His punishment is 10 hours in the sand box. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2198 He just saw a Trump victory mirage. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2199 I heard he lost a contact there. Twenty years ago. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2200 Is this part of the team building exercise? 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2201 We're replicating a viewer's experiencing an election year on TV. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2202 Meet my Dad, the actor. He's got an audition for a remake of Beau Geste. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2203 He said he needs to prepare for 'Survivor.' 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2204 "He's having withdrawal pains from being on 'Survivor'". 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2205 I call it the "Feel The Bern" mini. You sit in it to convince yourself you're not part of the 1%. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2206 Time to muck him out. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2207 I'm getting tired of cleaning up after litterbugs. How 'bout you? 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2208 He’s our top performer, but he tends to slow down when he gets near the finish line. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2209 I call it 'Training for Death Valley Marathon.' 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2210 He got primaried. 1.1739 0.12015 23 21 0 2
2211 Looks like someone's discovered our "mushrooms". 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2212 This is getting weird. Let's go flip those pancakes. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2213 Too bad he does not have a metal detector. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2214 We're marketing it as the Infinity Sandbox 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2215 He played first base for the '86 Mets. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2216 The co-op is promoting urban beaches. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2217 He must be a mirage. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2218 Lost your contacts in the sandbox again? 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2219 His name's Bond -- vagabond. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2220 C’mon, Billy. Let’s go play in a virtual sandbox. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2221 He said he lost his mind in the sandbox when he was five. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2222 Poor kid, he lost a dime in there when he was three years old and he's been looking for it ever since. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2223 Some obsession with a film about a soccer ball and some ice skates. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2224 We can't 'desert' him, but let's leave anyway. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2225 Jeff's training for global warming. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2226 Budget imposed desert training. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2227 Don't mind him. He's insane. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2228 I guess marketing's already thinking about the Californian campaign. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2229 My mom says it's the cheapest Zumba in town! 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2230 All I know is he calls himself the sheik of the burning sands. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2231 How much longer until production starts, Mr. DeCaprio? 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2232 It's been like this ever since the method acting school moved next door. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2233 They built a wall around a Mexican instead. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2234 Must've missed juice time. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2235 Oh,I got it,Bogie in The Treasure of the Sierra Madre. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2236 He's disoriented and hallucinating. Just think, that'll be us when we're teenagers. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2237 Come on, use your words. 1.1739 0.12015 23 21 0 2
2238 First time in 25 years he's forgotten his pail and shovel. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2239 What are the chances he'll find his way out before recess is over. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2240 These millennials are so dramatic. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2241 40 days later, a dedicated method actor continues in preparation for his new role as Moses..... 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2242 Bring Your Dad to School Day is not so easy after all? 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2243 Stephen was vexed by the lack of water in his latest mirage. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2244 That Brut cologne seems to loose it's appeal after 15 hours in the sun. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2245 He keeps muttering...'cigarettes'. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2246 He says he feels much better when he gets back to the cubicle. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2247 'I guess you could share your water with him.' 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2248 It's been difficult to attract voluteers for our climate-change simulation. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2249 He thinks he's a cat. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2250 I think our organic art installation is ready for viewing. 1.1739 0.12015 23 21 0 2
2251 I thought the sandbox was password protected. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2252 This is a tough act to follow. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2253 He comes up here drunk and tries to remake "Ishtar. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2254 Adults these days... 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2255 He keeps on saying “kiddie pool, kiddie pool”. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2256 Not everyone is cured by sandbox therapy. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2257 The studios are really small in this building. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2258 He looks like he needs a juice box. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2259 He said he is practicing for the Sahara half-marathon. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2260 Nobody's ever beaten the sandbox test before! 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2261 Don't worry, he is just practicing for his job-hunt next week. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2262 "This is his tenth life". 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2263 I don't know... he keeps mumbling something about an oasis. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2264 Go get a bigger heat lamp. We've got a cold one, Martha 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2265 Well I'm just surprised he hasn't peed in it yet! 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2266 Our homeroom teacher searches the sandbox every day for loose change. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2267 If he is a good boy, I allow him to play in the sandbox! 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2268 He's audioning for reality TV. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2269 Some of the city's anti-litter laws are going too far. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2270 He's practicing for the Sahara. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2271 This new Mirage Diet is killing our sandbox time. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2272 I think it's called a mid-life crisis. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2273 My Dad's protesting the new water-use restrictions. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2274 He'll make it. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2275 I think that lemonade stand idea of yours has found its moment. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2276 Like we planned: you tell him about the oasis while I get his wallet. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2277 And for our final exhibit, we have Tom Hanks training for Cast Away II. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2278 I still prefer this over office yoga. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2279 When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2280 Well Susie, at least he kept the cats from using it as a litter box. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2281 We are standing on the roof of the sandbox museum trying to assess if the man in the sandbox is part of this exhibition or merely a casualty of a guided tour that had gone horribly wrong. Do you care to comment? 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2282 He's taking sandbox therapy to a new level. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2283 Let's get out of here before the digging starts this time. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2284 Be patient, he'll leave when the vultures appear! 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2285 From the Latin mirari urbanus, otherwise known as Tuesday. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2286 It's my greatest sand sculpture yet. I'm calling it 'Election Season'. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2287 Come on Stan, if you haven't found your keys by now you're not going to find them. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2288 I told you Mr. Maldoceo's been acting weird since we got back from spring break. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2289 Don't you think he is taking 'new realism' a bit too far? 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2290 My dad is teaching me the downside of owning a cat. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2291 If you haven't found your identity yet, maybe someone else would like a turn. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2292 We could say dad's into boxing. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2293 I don,t suppose he is bringing me a dream 1.1739 0.12015 23 21 0 2
2294 So this is the big idea behind these hot yoga classes, huh honey? "Well, they did say space was limited. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2295 Mom's parents in town again? 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2296 I think I'll pass on the desert simulator 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2297 "Unscented," my ass. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2298 Do you ever have the feeling that adults have colonized childhood? 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2299 Can your Dad please take his Ishtar fantasies elsewhere? 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2300 Dad's reliving his life as a former castaway 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2301 If we want the it back, ask mom for a pitcher of margaritas. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2302 I get it Dad, I don't need an Oculus Rift 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2303 It's a Sahara Syndrom Therapy. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2304 should we help dad find his contact lens? 1.1739 0.12015 23 21 0 2
2305 He'll never use it. I mean, you can take a man outta the alley...but can you ever really take the alley outta a man? 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2306 Shhh! He thinks it is a mirage. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2307 Authenticity is overrated. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2308 Year 22: Still lost in the desert with no food or water. All my friends have left and I can't seem to find any exits. I will continue to search this sandy box 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2309 He's the cartoonist. He's sure this will stump all the contestants. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2310 That's nothing. Smell it sometime after the cat's been there. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2311 Looking for Rosebud. 1.1739 0.12015 23 21 0 2
2312 I hope he gets rescued soon, recess is almost over. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2313 He bet my uncle he could make it on Survivor. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2314 And finally, our rooftop installation juxtaposes the elements with the shear force of human exploration. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2315 He still has flashbacks to that last, harrowing cartoon. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2316 He thinks everything outside that box is just a mirage. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2317 He's lost perspective. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2318 I wonder why he wanders... 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2319 Your dad doesn't seem to quite grasp the concept of virtual reality. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2320 I told you we should have bought a cat instead... 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2321 The number of lengths is impressive but the tumble turns are awesome. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2322 Mister, are you lost? You look like you belong in a desert cartoon. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2323 No fair. This guy's been hogging our Möbius sandbox for days! 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2324 Man on a Hot Tin Roof 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2325 It's our unique treadmill so he can train for his next 100 mile desert race. 1.1739 0.10239 23 20 2 1
2326 It's supposed to replace the never ending pool. 1.1739 0.08081 23 19 4 0
2327 It's my Dad. He thinks he's a cat. 1.1724 0.08694 29 25 3 1
2328 You should see him at the beach. 1.1724 0.08694 29 25 3 1
2329 Dad likes really, really dry martinis. 1.1724 0.07139 29 24 5 0
2330 I told you they were shooting the remake of the Hangover here!! 1.1714 0.07654 35 30 4 1
2331 Oh no — it's New Yorker Cartoon Fantasy Camp day. 1.1707 0.06899 41 35 5 1
2332 Sorry, I have this booked for the next 15 years. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2333 He's been looking for his keys for years. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2334 Mom says it's method acting. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2335 They say it might have a virus. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2336 The best way to get the deepest bond with your cat is to spend a month in her paws. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2337 I will sure be glad when his acting classes are over. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2338 No oasis unless he takes back my F in math. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2339 Our turn, the egg timer just dinged. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2340 cut! He's got the Part 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2341 No, he can't leave the box. He's Republican - born without a future tense. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2342 There's my new dad. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2343 Sir, exactly how long have you been looking for your kitty? 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2344 He's practicing for the desert marathon. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2345 So I guess we really are just someone's mirage. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2346 We never had to worry about someone crawling through our sandbox when we lived in the burbs. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2347 'The Thirst Artist' just doesn't have the same ring to it. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2348 I knew he could be catty, but I didn't think he took it so seriously . . . 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2349 If he's the Sandman, I'm never sleeping again. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2350 We've found that morale goes down, but they take fewer bathroom breaks. So it's mostly a wash. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2351 'Yard Time" has a different meaning in these white-collar prisons. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2352 Grownups need to play act rather than play. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2353 Some people just never make it out of the sandbox. 1.1667 0.08419 30 26 3 1
2354 It's my Dad. We just moved into the condo. He's looking for the exercise room amenity 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2355 He's really committed to pantomiming the California water crisis. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2356 A minimalist before he became a survivalist, he just lacks any stick-to-itiveness, so we should be able to play in the sandbox by tomorrow. 1.1667 0.08419 30 26 3 1
2357 It's the latest in artisanal weight-loss programs. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2358 I'm helping him think outside of the box. 1.1667 0.11526 24 22 0 2
2359 It's temporary. We're building him a little desert island. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2360 Your dad's vision quest seems short sighted. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2361 After school I'll change his liter. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2362 Two more hours and we can move onto phase eight of your co-op application. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2363 I heard he went a whole block without hydrating. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2364 Should we get your dad some water? 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2365 I outgrew mine years ago. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2366 Is he STILL Looking for his phone? 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2367 He has been playing "The Castaway" for weeks 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2368 Talk about suffering for one's art... 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2369 Ed looks ready to dig through our annual report. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2370 He can't decide which brand of bottled water to use. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2371 He said he's looking for the promised land. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2372 Lawrence, let us have our turn! 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2373 Acting like at cat at his age isn't funny. 1.1667 0.09039 18 15 3 0
2374 He should just be glad it's not my quicksand box. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2375 Actually, Eric, before Moms and Dads went with Madoff, we used to vacation in Palm Beach 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2376 He's inspired me to rethink the medium. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2377 Just a few more minutes wait.... His time is about to expire. 1.1667 0.06920 30 25 5 0
2378 It is thought to give the homeless a sense of play! 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2379 No, he actually DID lose a cat's eye marble. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2380 I thought if I brought your father back to his childhood, he could better relate to your concerns. I guess he went back too far. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2381 This new "flex time" vacation policy really stinks. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2382 This still doesn't prove global warming is real. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2383 I get that he thinks he's in front of Grauman's Chinese. I just don't get Clark Gable. 1.1667 0.11526 24 22 0 2
2384 The name of the spin-off will be 'Sandbox Survivor.' 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2385 Still can't find your contact lens? 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2386 Do you think he needs a drink or a cigarette? 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2387 He doesn't look ready for the herculean task of digging to China. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2388 I don't want to grow up, besides, I like it here. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2389 It's another Trump intern practicing how to draw a line in the sand 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2390 Don't you think his training for the show would be better if he took off his clothes? 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2391 Didn't we have a reservation? 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2392 I guess if You hang around the Cat Litter Box long enough, You are going to end up using it. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2393 Things just haven't been the same for Aladdin recently. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2394 Wonder what part of Bernie's grand vision he fits into. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2395 I'll go back for the rake --in case it thinks it's a litter box 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2396 Immersive acting turned out to be cheaper than the Maserati. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2397 He's myopic: the world is his desert. 1.1667 0.11526 24 22 0 2
2398 I'm not giving Dad his iPhone back until I get some face time. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2399 I really hate method actors. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2400 His parents never should have named him 'Sandy.' 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2401 By a stroke of luck, he got here first. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2402 Ever since he lost his metal detector. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2403 Is he the sandman? 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2404 Some grown-ups just never learn to drink outside the box. 1.1667 0.09829 24 21 2 1
2405 Mom calls it "cat box therapy". He flunked out of the dog house. 1.1667 0.07771 24 20 4 0
2406 Finally, I made it to Flah-ri-da! 1.1667 0.08419 30 26 3 1
2407 Summer sandbox hours are hell. 1.1613 0.08161 31 27 3 1
2408 I bring him water so he can keep hunting for treasure. 1.1613 0.06715 31 26 5 0
2409 Like many Baby Boomers, he decided to downsize. 1.1613 0.08161 31 27 3 1
2410 Dad's reliving his "glory days" in desert storm again. 1.1613 0.06715 31 26 5 0
2411 What's that man doing in the cat's bathroom, anyway? 1.1613 0.08161 31 27 3 1
2412 ...And this is our advanced scratch and sniff program. 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2413 He needs to learn how to play better in the sandbox 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2414 I think it's Mr. Katz from the 8th floor. 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2415 Man says to kids: "What ever happened to that so-called sea level rise?" 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2416 Looks like we need to find another mobile hotspot soon. 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2417 Some kids like to play "house." Mark likes to play "Shawshank Redemption." 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2418 There is nothing in the sandbox, and no man needs nothing 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2419 I think he's headed for the wading pool. 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2420 I call it 'The Rooftop Urban Litterbox' 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2421 I'm too young for this crap. 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2422 He's been stuck in that mirage since he was our age. 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2423 Only one desert treadmill, and he's always hogging it. 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2424 Hey dad, welcome to our world. 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2425 I know this trick; hog the sandbox when societal pressures seem insurmountable. 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2426 Be careful.We don't have enough antibodies to get in there with him. 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2427 On his 40th birthday, he'll switch to the 'land of milk and honey' box. 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2428 He says he couldn't afford a metal detector. 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2429 I guess this sandbox is only for the 1% 1.1600 0.11075 25 23 0 2
2430 You don't think he'll actually eat us if we answer incorrectly, do you?" "No clue. But I do want to know what he's hiding in there. 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2431 This is how we punish when you short change our little coffee club. 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2432 He tries to be a good dad, but it's all a mirage. 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2433 That's just my dad. He's always said he'd like to get a small place on the high desert. 1.1600 0.07483 25 21 4 0
2434 This whole thing is a mirage. 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2435 You know, one man's trash is another man's treasure. 1.1600 0.09452 25 22 2 1
2436 He thinks it's the 1869 one cent coin a told him I lost -- it's a penny. 1.1591 0.06456 44 38 5 1
2437 I guess the wall might work. 1.1579 0.08595 19 16 3 0
2438 He drinks. 1.1579 0.08595 19 16 3 0
2439 Henry's always on the prowl for water. 1.1579 0.08595 19 16 3 0
2440 This isn't the kind of adult playground I had in mind. 1.1579 0.08595 19 16 3 0
2441 I think Uncle Moses is taking our genealogy project too seriously. 1.1579 0.08595 19 16 3 0
2442 I'm just happy my name's not Wilson. 1.1579 0.11504 19 17 1 1
2443 My dad binge-watched "Survivor" then this happened. 1.1579 0.08595 19 16 3 0
2444 Back off! This is my stacation. 1.1579 0.11504 19 17 1 1
2445 He comes here to reminisce. 1.1579 0.11504 19 17 1 1
2446 I told you we wouldn't be able to use the pail and shovel. 1.1562 0.07918 32 28 3 1
2447 I lost it in the sandbox dad. Not the litter box. 1.1556 0.06321 45 39 5 1
2448 I thought your dad was a Real Estate Broker?" "No Lenny, I said he was broke. 1.1538 0.07216 26 22 4 0
2449 Incentives make filming within the city a great deal. 1.1538 0.09102 26 23 2 1
2450 That's Harris from 5C reenacting Operation Desert Sandbox. 1.1538 0.07216 26 22 4 0
2451 He collects old rattles. 1.1538 0.09102 26 23 2 1
2452 I lost my contacts 1.1538 0.09102 26 23 2 1
2453 That's the IT guy. They misinterpreted his sandbox order. 1.1538 0.05853 39 33 6 0
2454 No need to demonstrate, Daddy. We can figure it out ourselves. 1.1538 0.07216 26 22 4 0
2455 He's going to drink well tonight. 1.1538 0.07216 26 22 4 0
2456 Yes, it is a mirage. 1.1538 0.09102 26 23 2 1
2457 Therefore grind the gears of history. The vast struggle of the older generation becomes, almost as if it never happened, a laughable frivolity for the next generation. Plus, I took a huge grump in there lol. 1.1538 0.09102 26 23 2 1
2458 is that dad? 1.1538 0.09102 26 23 2 1
2459 Moat it is. 1.1538 0.09102 26 23 2 1
2460 He's searching for his lost youth. 1.1538 0.07216 26 22 4 0
2461 It's called the Peter Pan syndrome. 1.1515 0.06338 33 28 5 0
2462 Perrier! Perrier! Perrier! 1.1515 0.06338 33 28 5 0
2463 Lilly, I think I know what those dry nuggets were. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2464 This is one heck of an oasis. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2465 I can't afford a time share 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2466 Zeno's Paradox is a bitch. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2467 Sometimes you just gotta think outside the sandbox. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2468 he keeps mumbling GPS, GPS. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2469 You do Stanislavski proud, but could we just move along? 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2470 He's bringing attention to the water shortage. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2471 It's dry schadenfreude 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2472 Are you sure this is the way to China? 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2473 He's hoping for a call from Grumman's Chinese Theater 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2474 Wouldn't he prefer to tread water? 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2475 It's all about your point of view 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2476 He lost it again. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2477 Either he lost a contact lens, or it's retrogression. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2478 It's sad. Some grown-ups don't know the difference between suffering and play. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2479 Do ya think he's been wormed? 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2480 Searching for Neverland. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2481 When I invented the infinity sandbox I didn't expect it to work THIS well. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2482 Dad is determined to find your contact lens. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2483 He always has to look for pennies before he lets you play 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2484 Help--I've misplaced my dignity. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2485 "Hey kids! Can you help find Daddy's penis? Your mother hid it again. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2486 dads training for the death valley marathon 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2487 My lunch money he doesn't find it. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2488 Your dad looks very Picassoesque when he's hungover. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2489 Is it performance art or is it heat stroke? 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2490 I can hardly wait until the "Adult Crawl" hour is over. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2491 Should've thought outside the box. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2492 Let's dig a grave. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2493 I told you the sandbox was too small. So what!? I told you he wasn't dead. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2494 It's not the heat, it's the math. He only gets halfway there every day. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2495 This exhibit is called "Wall Street's American Dream". 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2496 I'm thinking Sphinx. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2497 Should we call him an Uber? 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2498 He’s still unsure of the storyline, but he’s settled on the title, 'Cat on a Hot Tin Roof'. 1.1500 0.06746 40 35 4 1
2499 His lobotomy had some severe sideeffects. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2500 The Urban Litter Box? I'm not scooping this!! 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2501 He's training for the 4800K. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2502 The rest of the Bekram yoga class shows up at five. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2503 Dad gets nostalgic for our summers at the beach. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2504 He rented this sandbox as an affordable alternative to the Burning Man Festival. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2505 Performance art is so over. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2506 It's one of those new infinity deserts. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2507 Looks like Jimmy's helicopter dad crashed. 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2508 I told him I buried his IPHONE 6 S 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2509 Wait until he gets to the cliffs. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2510 My father's been this way since the air conditioning has been on the fritz. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2511 Those baby boomers never grow up 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2512 Okay, now he's copying my cat. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2513 Yesterday he mumbled something about palm trees on the next building. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2514 " Your Dad needs to drink outside of the box"! 1.1500 0.10942 20 18 1 1
2515 Dad has become such a drama queen since the divorce. I'm sure he misses our other dad. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2516 I’m tempted to leave him to his fate. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2517 See?! Global warming is true. 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2518 He dropped his 'Vote for Trump' pin in there 2 weeks ago? 1.1500 0.08192 20 17 3 0
2519 He takes Throwback Thursdays way too seriously. 1.1481 0.06967 27 23 4 0
2520 All we need is a title. 1.1481 0.08777 27 24 2 1
2521 He finally used his one vacation day 1.1481 0.06967 27 23 4 0
2522 Yep, once we put in the cat litter, he was good to go. 1.1481 0.06967 27 23 4 0
2523 I think he lost his iPhone" 1.1481 0.08777 27 24 2 1
2524 We had to limit intern hazing this year. 1.1481 0.08777 27 24 2 1
2525 It's my Lawrence of Arabia virtual reality prototype. 1.1481 0.08777 27 24 2 1
2526 He wants to know how much further to Cleveland,says he's a delegate. 1.1471 0.06165 34 29 5 0
2527 Enjoy the journey, because the destination is a mirage. 1.1471 0.06165 34 29 5 0
2528 The sand is on a treadmill... I don't know what he's on. 1.1471 0.07472 34 30 3 1
2529 It looks like he's been here awhile. I'm going to run down and grab him a Pellegrino. 1.1471 0.07472 34 30 3 1
2530 He is either trying to channel his inner child or he is suffering from post traumatic sand box syndrome. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2531 We know, Dad, we know. You had to trek 20 miles across desert sands to get to school everyday.. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2532 He's rehearsing; he got a part in the Lawrence of Arabia remake. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2533 Let's help him dig for water. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2534 He's practicing for the political conventions. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2535 They've replaced the sandbox with a virtual desert. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2536 Needle in a haystack. Contact lens in a sandbox. Same thing, 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2537 Lacking powers of observation, Bob searches in vain for his bucket and spade. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2538 Ever since he lost his GPS, he's been acting very strange. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2539 Do an NYU study they said. It'll be fun they said. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2540 No Dad, we asked you to impersonate Batman not Catman! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2541 Spieth really had a hard time on twelve. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2542 Last week he wore a headdress and did a rain dance. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2543 I wanna play with him, but if he's been here that long there's no way that sand is dry. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2544 This takes street life and Performance Art to a whole new level. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2545 I told you they had hot yoga for them. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2546 Dad's trying a new kind of cleanse. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2547 Well, I guess that's what happens when there is a sandbox on the roof of the Actors Studio. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2548 This is why there's now a Toys'R'Us disclaimer. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2549 He said he is from code enforcement and we have to pay him for demolition. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2550 He was editor of The Boston Globe just before President Trump got in. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2551 My Dad has all of his CD's 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2552 I'am thinking Depends next time. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2553 You think he would know that this is a smoke free building. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2554 He's our new green AC. Looking at him makes you feel cool. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2555 Friday, 4:59pm. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2556 I think Dave's misinterpreted "Feel The Bern." 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2557 Oh.....you wanted a rooftop infinity POOL. My bad. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2558 He's really got to learn to delegate. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2559 My mom told me it's called 'Performance Art'. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2560 Jeez, another urban doomsday prepper. Global warming can't come soon enough for me. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2561 He's feeling the Bern! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2562 In fact, it's a skylight. Just a few more seconds now. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2563 Looks like tom missed the memo 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2564 Even if he finds it, it won't be filtered. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2565 I don't recall babysitting the boss' idiot son being part of our job descriptions. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2566 Crack is one hell of a drug. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2567 He asked the wrong question at a staff meeting 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2568 Method Acting 101 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2569 He says it brings him back to a happier time, when he inexpicably played in children's sand boxes, but in better clothes. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2570 MANHATTAN BEACH BUM 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2571 My dad drops acid on Tuesdays. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2572 He started out as a third grader but his parents have been in litigation since 1998. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2573 Don't worry; my dad's researching his book about the presidential campaign. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2574 This happens every time he forgets a 9.0 PH balanced water. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2575 We need to get him to Sandbox Anonymous. Fast. 1.1429 0.06734 28 24 4 0
2576 Dad's really out of shape! 1.1429 0.06734 28 24 4 0
2577 When's dad gonna let us play? 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2578 Dad's feline-in-heat impression is very convincing. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2579 I was thinking Uncle Arvin recently seemed overly obsessed with the Kitty litter box. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2580 I feel like burying my head right here. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2581 That's Ed, our condo board president, who argued that a sandbox was anything but a splurge. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2582 It's great to see Mr. Whiskers so happy again in his new litter box 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2583 Should we tell him Wilson needs him to come to his office? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2584 We're trying to litter box train him. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2585 I told him you can find self-respect in play, not just in work. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2586 He lost something called a floppy disk in the nineties. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2587 When John's ancestry results told him he was part Siamese, I didn't think he would take it so literally. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2588 He muttered something about slouching towards Brooklyn to be reborn. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2589 Think we should change his food? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2590 Good thing I brought a shovel. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2591 I say, Mary, that is the best crawl of shame I have seen all week. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2592 Maybe it's Cat Pilates 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2593 C'mon Dad–time for work. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2594 He's searching for his lost childhood. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2595 You would think 'Exclusive Roof Rights' would exclude that 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2596 He has not been the same after his rescue. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2597 Drunk or sober, he acts like this all the time. I can never tell the difference! 1.1429 0.09913 28 26 0 2
2598 Must be practicing for Survivor. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2599 Looks like Mr. Benton forgot his morning latte. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2600 Gives new meaning to Metallica's, Enter Sandman 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2601 We are all just living in somebody else's world. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2602 Tom Hanks he ain't. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2603 He' testing his survival instincts. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2604 Is this what they mean by sub-Saharan? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2605 Point him to the Oasis Day Spa on Park 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2606 C'mon Dad its not funny anymore! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2607 Is this what they mean by "Uptown Funk You Up"? 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2608 When do We Get to Play in The Sandbox Dad? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2609 That's going to be our first 4D painting 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2610 He keeps muttering something about his inner child. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2611 Oh great! Daddy's training for Tough Mudder again. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2612 He's not leaving until he finds his cat. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2613 He's been over at "The Oasis," hanging out with Mirage. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2614 After just one performance, Dan's interpretive production of, "Man on a Hot Tin Roof", closed with horrible reviews. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2615 I'm afraid this is what my brother referred to as "stage 3 adulthood" 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2616 I think this settles our gentleman's bet about whether or not Dissociative Identity Disorder is real. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2617 It's how New Yorkers prepare to visit the desert. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2618 It must be a mirage. I see New York City. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2619 This Moses impersonator is getting a little old. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2620 I guess your dad's ready to go home. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2621 They're in rehearsals for "Lawrence of Astoria." He's playing the camel. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2622 He lost it here as a child... 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2623 He's a method actor. Moved in last week. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2624 He's rehearsing for his role in "Lawrence of Arabia." 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2625 Life after Guantanamo... 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2626 He's forgotten how to think inside the box 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2627 He told my father that he can't get that Foreign Legion stuff out of his blood. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2628 He's a struggling cartoonist. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2629 Sadly, due to budget cuts, they drained the kiddie pool and made it a sandbox. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2630 My dad suffers "post Sahara syndrome". 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2631 I just want to feel like a kid again. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2632 At least he has his education. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2633 Let him try one more time before we go in for the rescue. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2634 Call the consultants, he can't think outside the box. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2635 Is dad really in the sandbox, or is it just a mirage? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2636 Late walkers are naturally smarter. 1.1429 0.14286 14 13 0 1
2637 Looks like he is training for ISIS. You paint a jail around him and I'll call Donald Trump. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2638 You were the one who wanted an adult playground on the roof. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2639 Sorry, kids. I really want to go to the beach. That's all. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2640 I say we wait him out. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2641 I lost my denture here. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2642 We can play when my Dad finishes his climate apocalypse training. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2643 Don't worry, he won't find the list without a bucket. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2644 Seriously? You have a life insurance policy? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2645 My daddy can't afford a lap pool. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2646 Mom! Sahara Joe's in our sandbox again! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2647 I told dad we could not have a play date today. 1.1429 0.06734 28 24 4 0
2648 I think Ronny is getting too old to play in the sand. His joie just isn't there anymore. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2649 Growing bums is all the rage you know. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2650 He never got over his five minutes of fame at Grauman's Chinese Theater. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2651 It takes a Sandbox! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2652 Just wait until you see this in winter 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2653 He can't hear you; we're a mirage. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2654 I think this one wants us to irrigate with rum. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2655 Thought we were here to change kitty litter. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2656 Pop takes his cartoon modeling career seriously. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2657 We wants it. We needs it. Must have the preciousss! 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2658 Just get him water and he'll leave. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2659 I thought the Sandman only came at night 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2660 Should we tell him we're not part of a mirage? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2661 Maybe another hour. Two, tops. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2662 So, can't he, like, find a desert to play in? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2663 This guy will never make it to the corporate ladder. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2664 Early puberty. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2665 Dad's unlocking his creativity again...guess we'll have to play video games." 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2666 The industrial revolution and its consequences, Linda. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2667 ...solves the cat problem. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2668 This is now considered to be affordable housing 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2669 This will take a while. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2670 Dr. Klein's sandplgy therapy can be quite intense. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2671 I'm not sure the art world is ready for sand pontillism just yet 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2672 These extreme sports are not for me. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2673 It's a minimum wage job nowadays. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2674 I told dad to take the camel. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2675 Hey kids, help me find my New York values! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2676 He lost a contact! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2677 I wanted a dessert with jimmies. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2678 The only way he'll acknowledge us is if we pretend to be rescuers and I'm not ready for that yet. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2679 That reminds me. I forgot to feed the cat. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2680 They told me this was the Hollywood Walk of Fame! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2681 He is practicing for trans-Saharan marathon. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2682 Geez, Billy's dad's gotta learn to think outside the box. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2683 NOT AGAIN, ANOTHER GROWN-UP PRACTICING FOR THOSE DUMB REALITY SHOWS. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2684 Are you sure you heard correctly, plays well with others? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2685 That's odd. He generally uses a metal detector. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2686 I forgot dad has an audition today. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2687 " His Boy Scout oath says "Be Prepared". 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2688 I call it 'The Future'. The sand is made of crushed participation trophies. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2689 He'll leave when he only finds our cat's buried treasure. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2690 Mr. Harper says it's a metaphor about the learning minds of 5th graders, but I just think it's creepy. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2691 I told them putting a litter box out for public use was a bad idea! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2692 Looks like Leo is trying to win another Oscar... 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2693 I know digging a well is a great idea; I'm just afraid he won't last until we hit water. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2694 These Foreign Legion boot camps are getting out of hand. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2695 Dad, you're embarrassing us. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2696 I hate to tell him we're a mirage. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2697 Geez! The big kids get here first and grab all the space! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2698 Mondays amirite? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2699 Dad never thinks outside the box. 1.1429 0.06734 28 24 4 0
2700 An all too common sandbox scene at Vegas' Mirage Hotel and Casino 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2701 That is the saddest sand sculpture I've ever seen. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2702 I think he lost his Nanny. He just keeps repeating, "Evian, Evian." 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2703 Did he just say, 'My kingdom for a horse.' ? 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2704 We must be too young to get the reference. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2705 Do you even sandbox, bro? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2706 Gene and Nicky watched skeptically as their neighbor, an out-of-work actor, showed them how to "really play". 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2707 'It's time he was thinking out of the box'! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2708 Dad, vacation is over - get back to work. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2709 He is training for the new crossover show "Survivor in the City". 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2710 He's looking for the rooftop oasis our realtor advertised. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2711 "Dad missed his interval training session at the gym today! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2712 Give it a minute. it's slow-sand. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2713 It's a win-win. If he finds any cigarette butts he can keep them. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2714 He does it hoping to make the prices at the Oasis Mart seem reasonable. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2715 #firstworldprobz 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2716 He's really got to start thinking out of the box! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2717 Conceptual Art 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2718 The movie was better. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2719 Do you think we should tell him that he won't actually meet Trump when he's done? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2720 Another parent lost without his cell phone 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2721 A cat swallowed his wedding band. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2722 Thats one odd cat. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2723 Should we tell your Dad he's not a cat & that isn't the litter box? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2724 Oil executives are really getting desperate. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2725 Garden mirage 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2726 I wish he would learn to play outside the box. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2727 They need to stop showing Lawrence of Arabia on movie night 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2728 Dude, your youth ain't in there. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2729 Beat it pal, you're going to have to think outside the sandbox. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2730 Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a rather depressing one. 1.1429 0.07268 35 31 3 1
2731 The store said he'd clean himself, but I frankly don't know how much longer we can wait. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2732 You don't have to be out of the box to think outside of it. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2733 Would you prefer a rocking horse with no name? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2734 "I call it "The Pursuit of Happiness"'. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2735 Live from Manhattan, co-op owner locates key to board decisions 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2736 He hasn't had a juice box in three days. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2737 Oh, yeah? My dad can crawl slower than your dad. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2738 In the next scene my dad reenacts Lawrence's first meeting with Prince Faisal. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2739 It's OK. My drunk uncle thinks he's a cat. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2740 I rented it through "sand b and b," but he isn't checking out. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2741 I can't stop them from referring to it as a penalty. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2742 Ever since obstacle course racing became popular adults have been invading our play spaces. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2743 It's his version of a desert survival simulator. 1.1429 0.08474 28 25 2 1
2744 Should we tell him? 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2745 Nope, never moves till the sun goes down. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2746 Yeah, he's still looking for The Cloud. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2747 It's a Hot Yoga workout, without the yoga. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2748 I told you our rooftop sandbox was weird. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2749 He's been cast into the litter box of history. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2750 He calls it "The Mirage" but still seems like a cultural desert to me. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2751 I'd still vote for him. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2752 This exhibit made no sense the other day when it was raining. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2753 My dad's been rehearsing all night for 'Cats'. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2754 He said it's called 'mooncrawling.' 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2755 THIS time I mixed in Krazy Glue! 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2756 It would seem more like a day at the beach if we could wear our swimsuits. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2757 "It seems your Pop has fallen off the proverbial wagon". 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2758 Trump! 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2759 I always thought that Albert was an insurance agent who was a little crazy, but I was wrong; he's not an insurance agent!" 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2760 He still hasn't learn to use a toilet 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2761 After he gets cast on a humiliating reality show with has-been reality stars, we'll get our sand box back 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2762 He is unleashing his inner child because Mommy wouldn't let him have a bulldozer. 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2763 We used to use lab rats, but when you consider the upkeep costs, it's really cheaper to employ minimum wage workers for our studies. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2764 Oh, so you think we should call it "Marriage"? Funny. I think we should call it "I'm Having an Affair with Your Brother." 1.1429 0.10433 21 19 1 1
2765 I thought the new diet craze was supposed to be 'dessert first'. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0
2766 There goes the neighborhood. 1.1429 0.07825 21 18 3 0