Contest #511


Cartoon

511


Name Value
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Number of captions
Number of responses
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Dashboard

In this table, the "mean" means the empirically measured average funniness score when the "unfunny", "somewhat funny" and "funny" receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. "Precison" is the standard error of the mean, the standard deviation of the mean estimate. With that, a caption with an empirical mean μ and precision σ has true mean in the range [μ - 2σ, μ + 2σ] with 95% probability by the 68-95-99.7 rule assuming the responses are indepedent and identically distributed.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes "Unfunny" votes "Somewhat funny" votes "Funny" votes
0 I'm hourly. 1.8605 0.12707 43 18 13 12
1 And one day your son will keep you from having a heart attack. 1.7941 0.13862 34 15 11 8
2 I wish you had found that yesterday. 1.7419 0.14641 31 15 9 7
3 Attention to detail is important, son. 1.7037 0.14921 27 13 9 5
4 My cardiologist sells them. 1.6923 0.14432 26 12 10 4
5 Why, yes, I do work for the government. 1.6667 0.14329 24 11 10 3
6 Remember, anything worth doing, is worth doing in the hardest possible way. 1.6522 0.13497 23 10 11 2
7 The forecast calls for another foot of snow and suspension of child labor laws. 1.6364 0.16833 22 12 6 4
8 Have you found your brother yet? 1.6190 0.16148 21 11 7 3
9 I promised to take your mother shoe shopping as soon as I was finished. 1.6190 0.16148 21 11 7 3
10 See how easy it is? It's all in the wrist. 1.6000 0.13377 20 9 10 1
11 Not quite yet. Your grandmother is still visiting. 1.6000 0.15218 20 10 8 2
12 Your mother doesn't want me hurt. Only humiliated. 1.6000 0.15218 20 10 8 2
13 Make yourself useful and bring me the salt shaker for the sidewalk. 1.6000 0.16859 20 11 6 3
14 Because I promised your mother we would talk after I finished the driveway. 1.6000 0.18353 20 12 4 4
15 No one likes a show-off, son. 1.5789 0.13925 19 9 9 1
16 It’s time you learned about managing people’s expectations. 1.5789 0.17631 19 11 5 3
17 When you're older, you'll appreciate the comfort of mindless, unnecessary activity. 1.5789 0.11637 19 8 11 0
18 Only the mediocre workman blames his tools! 1.5789 0.17631 19 11 5 3
19 Sure, but does it build character? 1.5789 0.15887 19 10 7 2
20 NOW, you find the shovel? 1.5714 0.17271 14 7 6 1
21 A shovel? Why didn't I think of that? 1.5556 0.16612 18 10 6 2
22 I could have used that five hours ago, Billy. 1.5556 0.16612 18 10 6 2
23 You did a fine job but I'm a details guy. 1.5556 0.18475 18 11 4 3
24 It's worn down over the years, but it still does the job! 1.5556 0.14512 18 9 8 1
25 Shoveling is a journey, son, not a destination. 1.5556 0.14512 18 9 8 1
26 Do you see how I'm lifting with my legs? 1.5556 0.14512 18 9 8 1
27 Sometimes being paid by the hour is a good thing. 1.5556 0.18475 18 11 4 3
28 I've been at this for two days and NOW you find the shovel! 1.5556 0.16612 18 10 6 2
29 Want to trade again? 1.5556 0.18475 18 11 4 3
30 Thanks, but this is my way of avoiding election coverage. 1.5556 0.14512 18 9 8 1
31 Dad, is this what you meant when you told mom size doesn't matter? 1.5333 0.16523 15 8 6 1
32 There are no small shovels, only small shovelers. 1.5294 0.17400 17 10 5 2
33 Son, I'm sorry, but we're going to have to let you go. 1.5294 0.19398 17 11 3 3
34 Tell your mother I'll be in to meet her parents when I'm done. 1.5294 0.17400 17 10 5 2
35 Let this be a lesson on how the business world works. 1.5294 0.17400 17 10 5 2
36 It's not the size of your shovel son, it's how you use it. 1.5294 0.19398 17 11 3 3
37 I'm more about the process. 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
38 It gets smaller as you get older. 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
39 You're a shrewd trader, young Thumb! 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
40 This is better for my back. 1.5000 0.15811 16 9 6 1
41 "Your mother said we should be spending more time together". 1.5000 0.12910 16 8 8 0
42 The union won't let us use that one. 1.5000 0.15811 16 9 6 1
43 I told you, we're getting paid by the hour. 1.5000 0.12910 16 8 8 0
44 You look for the dog, I'll look for the hamster. 1.5000 0.18257 16 10 4 2
45 Remember, lift with your knees, not your back! 1.5000 0.20412 16 11 2 3
46 I'm being paid by the hour, not the job. 1.5000 0.15811 16 9 6 1
47 Because they're paying me by the hour, that's why. 1.5000 0.15811 16 9 6 1
48 I'm embracing minimalism. 1.5000 0.15811 16 9 6 1
49 It's good practice for when you never amount to anything. 1.5000 0.20412 16 11 2 3
50 I was your age when I started. 1.5000 0.20412 16 11 2 3
51 Son, I really wish you'd suggested that 7 hours ago. 1.4667 0.13333 15 8 7 0
52 That's not what I meant when I asked for a little help. 1.4667 0.13333 15 8 7 0
53 Sure, now you show up... 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
54 It's your Mom's idea. 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
55 It's the French way. I read an article. 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
56 "It's called, 'Zen Shoveling' son. Watch and learn! 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
57 You missed a flake. 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
58 Yes, the whole lawn! That's why you have the BIG shovel! 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
59 They call this a "tall?" You were right to get the grande. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
60 Quick switch shovels, Moms coming! 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
61 No Thanks - I'm trying to beat mom's Fitbit total 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
62 Hang on, I'll get the salt shaker. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
63 Point again to where you threw the keys. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
64 ' Son, when your mother gets like that, this is how you create a little me-time.' 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
65 Because it builds character. That's why, son. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
66 More shoveling, less self-esteem. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
67 Thanks, but as an artisinal shoveller I insist on craft and precision. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
68 In the snow, Derek always cleared a path from the highway to his gnome 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
69 You'll understand one day when YOUR mother-in-law is visiting. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
70 I did my part, now it's your turn. 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
71 Optical Illusion #10 - The shovels are the same size! 1.4667 0.13333 15 8 7 0
72 Oh, so now you don't want the big boy shovel anymore? 1.4667 0.13333 15 8 7 0
73 This spatula turned a retirement job into a retirement career. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
74 Because I'm the detail man that's why!!! 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
75 And you can paint the fence this summer. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
76 Where the hell were you nine hours ago? 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
77 Don't worry son. You will also be a father someday. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
78 I'm using the new Apple Smart Shovel 6. 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
79 Sure, it takes longer, but artisanal small-batch shoveling leaves each sidewalk truly unique. 1.4667 0.16523 15 9 5 1
80 I think your right. In this case size does matter. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
81 When push comes to shovel, you win. 1.4667 0.19190 15 10 3 2
82 Left my other shovel at the beach house. 1.4615 0.21529 13 9 2 2
83 I'm doing cardio, not strength training today. 1.4615 0.14391 13 7 6 0
84 It's not how big it is son,it's how you use it. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
85 See - it's not the size of the shovel, it's how well you use it. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
86 Son, a good carpenter doesn't blame his tools. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
87 I have to acknowledge shovel envy is real. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
88 Son, it's not a tiny shovel. It's seven hours of solitude. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
89 Can’t beat the pooper-scooper for heart healthy snow removal. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
90 You can't use that. We're Amish. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
91 When you reach China, we'll switch back. 1.4286 0.22761 14 11 0 3
92 You'll understand why that's not a better shovel when you're married. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
93 Put that thing away, we charge by the hour. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
94 Our HOA requires paths to be sculpted, not shoveled 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
95 It builds character! 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
96 Remember to lift with your legs, not with your back. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
97 No, thanks. I promised we'd visit your grandmother when I finished the walkway. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
98 Nonetheless, the entire walk is clear of snow. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
99 Someday, Son, this will be yours. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
100 Son, I'm the 1 % 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
101 Oh sure, but think of the job creation! 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
102 Maybe bigger is better. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
103 Don't get too optimistic about your lemonade sales. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
104 News flash: "We are being paid by the hour, not the shovelful." 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
105 What next? Some sort of machine that blows it out of the way? 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
106 After we're done we can make a thimble of hot chocolate. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
107 The trick is, the longer you spend in the snow, the more likely you are to win an Oscar. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
108 It's a Daddy heart attack preventer. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
109 Dad, "How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?" 1.4286 0.22761 14 11 0 3
110 For twenty bucks you couldn't get me to the curb? 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
111 Don't be silly, I can do this with one hand. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
112 Keep it. I'm getting paid by the hour. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
113 You see? There are no small shovels, only small snow shovelers. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
114 Sure, it takes longer, but it networks with my fitness tracker. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
115 When I was your age, all we had were thumb shovels. 1.4286 0.22761 14 11 0 3
116 Because I'm a job creator, that's why. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
117 Hey, no eight-year-old ever had a coronary doing this. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
118 No thanks. I'll stick with the one I've used since I was eight. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
119 C'mon son, if you want to be a politician like your old man, you have to learn how to shovel it. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
120 Now you know what it's like to be a man. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
121 You'll grow into it. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
122 You may be right, so far the snowflakes are all different. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
123 But I'm not ready to switch back. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
124 I get more steps on my fitbit this way. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
125 You lost the coin toss, get over it! 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
126 When I was a boy, we used a shingle on a stick, and lots of elbow grease. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
127 I'm an archaeologist. Why do you ask? 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
128 Now why didn't I think of that? 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
129 There is no "On" button. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
130 It might take a little longer than expected. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
131 It's all about quality, not quantity. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
132 When I was your age, I had to shovel the whole city without a coat. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
133 We charge by the hour, son. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
134 Here's a tip: bill by the scoop. 1.4286 0.13725 14 8 6 0
135 Now take the big shovel away and hide it while Daddy makes the neighbors think he's insane. 1.4286 0.20203 14 10 2 2
136 I've been doing it this way since I was a kid. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
137 Don't laugh. I escaped from prison this way. 1.4286 0.17271 14 9 4 1
138 It's an artisanal snow scoop. 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
139 It was uphill both ways when I was your age! 1.4167 0.19300 12 8 3 1
140 Your mother said go out and shovel with the little guy and that's what I'm doing. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
141 I'll be done by March. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
142 The cold made it shrink. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
143 Hey, the project is shovel-ready. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
144 Things seem bigger when you are young. When you are older it will seem small. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
145 Its the wrong house. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
146 Lift with your legs, like I'm doing. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
147 No matter what your mother says, size does matter. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
148 Sure, it would be easier. But the detailing would be all wrong. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
149 Can you get me the salt shaker? 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
150 Does this shovel make my butt look big? 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
151 You missed a spot... 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
152 Yea, but when i'm done it will be spring. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
153 Shovels don't clear sidewalks, people clear sidewalks. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
154 How did you get there without footprints? 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
155 No, I'm not getting you a Baby Hummer with a snow plow! 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
156 When I was your age, we used our hands for shovels! 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
157 I've got an idea.... 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
158 And this, my son, is how to make the most if you are paid per hour. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
159 If you're Yoda, give me The Force; if not, give me your shovel. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
160 When you're my age, you'll need one like this too 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
161 Because when I'm done shoveling the sidewalk I have to rub Grandma's nasty feet, that's why. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
162 Son, it's all about doing more with less. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
163 Size doesn't matter, it's all in how you use it son 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
164 Of course I knew we had that in the shed. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
165 No, really, this is all I need. The weather channel said it would be light snow today. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
166 The secret is to keep your back straight. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
167 Keep looking. I know grandma's out here somewhere. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
168 The messier, the better; then your mother won't trust us to do this anymore. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
169 Your back hurts? What about my wrist? 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
170 Keep shoveling while I try to unfreeze my light saber. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
171 Look, if you aren't going to take this seriously, just go inside. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
172 I feel like we want different things. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
173 It looks smaller when its cold out. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
174 I'm more of a details person, son. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
175 It's all in the wrist action. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
176 It's not the size, it's how you use it. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
177 See? Manual labor is not at all like Minecraft. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
178 How many times do I have to repeat it: it's not the size that counts, it's how you use it! 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
179 OK, OK - neither of us should have bought online. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
180 You should have seen the shovel your grandfather used 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
181 Hey Dad. How can you still deny that Global Warming exists? This is August !! 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
182 ''Baby scoops.'' 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
183 ...aaaaand twenty! Your turn again, son! 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
184 Size matters? Your mom sent you out here to say that, right? 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
185 Walk tall and carry a small shovel 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
186 It was in your room? 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
187 We can't go to Grandma's recital until we're done. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
188 Yes son, there is a lesson. I'm just not sure what it is. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
189 I never said we weren't equal. I simply said you are smaller. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
190 You have to use your legs. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
191 No, I don't want to rent your shovel, the spatula is working just fine. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
192 We get paid by the hour you know. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
193 It's an optical illusion. Keep shoveling. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
194 You'll always be Daddy's little helper, but right now I need you to get your ass in gear. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
195 I'll take it! This one's just about used up. 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
196 It's not about size, son, it's all about how you use it. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
197 If I give you the little shovel, will you stop putting the snow back on the sidewalk? 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
198 You want it fast , or you want it good? 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
199 So, if the little shovel can move twenty percent of what the big shovel can move, but the big shovel moves no snow at all, then how much of the snow does the little shovel move? 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
200 No more "Rock, Paper, Scissors". Ever! 1.3846 0.14044 13 8 5 0
201 Son, you won't create many jobs doing it like that. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
202 Thanks, kid. I'll finish up now. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
203 You said you're a big boy. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
204 I charge by the hour. 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
205 My doctor said 'no heavy lifting' 1.3846 0.21299 13 10 1 2
206 When you're a little older you'll understand daddy's crazy. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
207 Sure, but my way builds character. 1.3846 0.18040 13 9 3 1
208 Thanks, but I'm getting paid by the hour, if you get my drift. 1.3636 0.15212 11 7 4 0
209 Slow and steady wins the race 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
210 Tell Mom I'll watch the debates as soon as I finish shoveling. 1.3636 0.24393 11 9 0 2
211 A bad workman always blames his tools. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
212 I guess size does matter 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
213 This way is more artisanal. 1.3636 0.20328 11 8 2 1
214 I used to work at Ben & Jerry's 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
215 No ! No ! No ! I'll dig out grandma . 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
216 Too want your father to avoid a massive heart attack, don't you? 1.3333 0.22473 12 10 0 2
217 Where's the challenge in that? 1.3333 0.22473 12 10 0 2
218 Say, could I borrow your gloves? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
219 No, the point is avoiding mommy. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
220 Try choking up on the handle. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
221 Damn those liberals! Where's the global warming when we need it? 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
222 Why do I always have to clean up after you? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
223 No thanks. I need an excuse to be out of the house longer. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
224 You need to work harder at undercompensating! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
225 It's not the size that matters, it's what you do with it. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
226 It's economics, kid. I get paid by the hour. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
227 Fine. Knock yourself out, Napoleon. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
228 Next time I get to be the grown up. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
229 Beat me again. What's your secret? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
230 I hear these new shovels pose less of a heart attack risk. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
231 It's the new ishovel 7! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
232 Like I tell your Mom son, bigger is not better. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
233 At least you get to stay home! 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
234 Why do you keep asking if I'm sure that I'm your father? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
235 I really don't want to go to work. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
236 I would swap shovels with you but my sciatica wont let me. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
237 Shut-up! I did the walkway to the house with this. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
238 Shhh. I told your mother I'd watch The View with her as soon as I cleared the entire sidewalk. 1.3333 0.22473 12 10 0 2
239 ...and your point is? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
240 Put that away! I told the boss I'd be in when I was finished shoveling. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
241 I know it seems unfair, now. But when you grow up, you'll be your own hapless character trapped in an absurdist cartoon, just like Daddy. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
242 It's like Social Security. You'll understand when you're older, and even more resentful. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
243 Just think son, when you're my age this will all be water. 1.3333 0.22473 12 10 0 2
244 Stop compensating, dad. 1.3333 0.22473 12 10 0 2
245 It's artisanal shovelling. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
246 Now can we agree that size doesn't matter? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
247 It's a long winter, you'll grow into the shovel. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
248 Sisyphus who! 1.3333 0.22473 12 10 0 2
249 The New Yorker cartoonists aren't putting much thought into it anymore. 1.3333 0.22473 12 10 0 2
250 What matters is how you use it. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
251 You do the grunt work. I'll do the edges. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
252 I hated my dad, and now you'll hate yours. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
253 You sound like your mother. It's not about size. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
254 If you wanna make some big money, you need to charge by the scoop. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
255 I'll get some here, son. You can clear out the rest. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
256 You're lucky. Back in my day my father didn't help me. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
257 When you hit metal, it's the SUV. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
258 Where's your baby sister with the snowblower? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
259 Thanks, but I'm in no hurry...I'm on my way to work. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
260 Son, I've been doing it this way since I was five. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
261 Don't worry - your little sister is coming soon with the bulldozer. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
262 Where were you 6 hours ago? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
263 Son, THIS is what separates an artist from the plebeians. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
264 It helps if you bend at your knees. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
265 "But I'm a Finishing Shoveler". 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
266 Thanks son but this allows for a more chiseled look 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
267 Stop whining about losing the coin-toss 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
268 I have no idea why your mother says I'm always doing things the hard way. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
269 Government-run snow removal. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
270 That's only your perspective. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
271 Keep it. I'm paid by the hour. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
272 I get paid by the shovelful. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
273 See? Just lift with your knees. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
274 When I was your age we had to shovel our way to school, two miles each way — uphill in the snow! 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
275 One more minute until Daddy gets the shovel, okay? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
276 Next time, pick heads. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
277 My shovel's not really that small; it's just drawn that way. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
278 I charge by the scoop. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
279 …but I don't want hair on my chest! 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
280 I’ll use it after Mommy’s family leaves. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
281 Obviously I'd prefer yours, but Helen gave me this one for Christmas. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
282 The story of modern day Sisyphus 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
283 In my day, we cleared the snow from miles of sidewalk with just a spatula. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
284 And no, you will not be getting a participation trophy. 1.3333 0.22473 12 10 0 2
285 How 'bout *you* start paying *me* allowance? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
286 Too heavy. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
287 No one ever got a heart attack from snow spooning. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
288 What's the sport in that? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
289 Instead of the dollar, I'll teach you about the trickle-down effect. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
290 There's no App for this. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
291 No thanks--I've joined the slow movement. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
292 Your grandfather, the archaeologist, taught me how to shovel snow. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
293 Don't blame the tool, son. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
294 Mine has a smaller carbon footprint. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
295 Did Tom Brady complain about the size of his shovel when he was drafted in the sixth round? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
296 When I mow, I prefer scissors. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
297 No, thanks. I'm undercompensating. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
298 What? And give up snow business? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
299 The minimalist lifestyle allows no exceptions. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
300 It gets easier as you get older. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
301 Yes, I did wish for a bigger one. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
302 A good workman never complains of his tools. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
303 Stop shoving it over to my side. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
304 It's not the about destination it's about the journey 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
305 When you're my age you'll appreciate the difference between hourly and fixed fee contracts. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
306 It's all about attention to detail. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
307 Do you want it done fast or do you want it done right? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
308 Yeah, I bill by the hour 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
309 ...And, yes, it was uphill both ways. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
310 See, this little one works just fine. Now why don't you try? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
311 I told you; low weight, high reps! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
312 And now, son, you understand the concept of 'billable hours' 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
313 You see how I’m lifting with my legs? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
314 100 bucks to give me back my shovel. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
315 I'm wearing my fitbit. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
316 Your generation is too entitled. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
317 Since last Sunday, and you? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
318 What did you say about switching shovels? 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
319 Where's the challenge? 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
320 Make sure you tell them you charge by the hour 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
321 Now you understand how our tax system works. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
322 Last time I play high-stakes Candy Land with you. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
323 I bill by the hour. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
324 When you grow up you'll make better choices. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
325 Now that is how I had to do it when I was your age. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
326 It's not how small the tool son, it's that you git her done! 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
327 Never bring a big shovel to a snowball fight, little man! 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
328 Go big or go home. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
329 I was your age when I started; the shovel only feels big! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
330 I had to do this with my hands when I was your age, uphill, with cardboard shoes. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
331 No, I do not think that this is what Marx meant by "From each according to his ability...." 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
332 You see son? Every goal can be broken down into a multitude of smaller goals. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
333 I told you switching wouldn't make you any happier. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
334 I was hired by the hour. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
335 It only looks small from where you're standing. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
336 I never should have told your mother that size doesn't matter. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
337 It's not the size of the shovel; it's what you do with it. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
338 Choke up. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
339 Don't worry -- it'll get easier when you grow up. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
340 I thought size didn't matter! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
341 A good worker never blames his tools. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
342 I better not find yellow snow behind that shovel. 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
343 With the big shovel comes big responsibility. 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
344 It's not the size of the shovel with the man, it's the size of the man with the shovel! 1.3333 0.18803 12 9 2 1
345 I get more reps this way! 1.3333 0.14213 12 8 4 0
346 No thanks. This is the only way to satisfy my FitBit goal for today. 1.3077 0.13323 13 9 4 0
347 Smarter not harder? Where do you come up with these things! 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
348 I'm not shoveling the snow, I'm looking for my keys! 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
349 You keep it, son. I'm in no hurry to reach the office. 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
350 No, I won't tweet Cory Booker to come over and shovel our sidewalk 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
351 When the snow melts I want to paint the house with a toothbrush. 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
352 No thanks! I must go to work when I've finished shoveling out, 1.3000 0.21344 10 8 1 1
353 How to avoid a heart attack 1.3000 0.15275 10 7 3 0
354 Someone a lot smarter than either of us said "It's a poor workman who blames his tools." 1.2857 0.18443 7 5 2 0
355 sometimes less is more 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
356 That's it! Put your back in it! 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
357 Well ? What's holding you up ? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
358 " Now you show up, where were you 11 hours ago"? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
359 Stop complaining. When I was a boy I used my hands - until they amputated the right one. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
360 Do you know you're an entitled little bastard? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
361 When you're retired you stretch every chore until it takes a week. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
362 You should join the union. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
363 Young Sigmund found relationships confusing 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
364 Okay dad. Can we cut it with the 'Size doesn't matter' analogies? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
365 I'm only going to show you how to do it ONE MORE TIME! 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
366 I've been reading a lot of Aesop lately 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
367 It's been 10 minutes, time to switch? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
368 Son, someday when you grow up it will be important to remember that size is not everything. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
369 The spatula is man's best friend. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
370 Well, you see, this is trickle down shoveling. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
371 I'm paid by the hour. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
372 Because when I started, all I could find was 'Malibu Barbie's beach shovel' 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
373 Are you going to ask it to Prom or are you going to finally help out here? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
374 Walk loudly and carry a small shovel 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
375 Objects are larger than they appear 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
376 You can tell your mom it's my heart healthy shovel and I need a few more hours. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
377 Well, you got to use it at the beach last summer. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
378 Nice try. Go back inside and tell your mother that she said to shovel the walk, so I'm shoveling the walk. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
379 It's not the size of your snow shovel, it's what you do with it. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
380 First thing you've got to learn, son, is to use the right tools. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
381 No Sisyphus, and I don't want to hear that kind of talk from you ever again! 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
382 Looks like you're gonna lose the bet, son. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
383 Let's charge by the hour. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
384 Darn, I left my Fitbit in the house. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
385 It's called an intentional productivity slowdown, son. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
386 It's not the size of the shovel that counts, it's in the wrist motion. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
387 Never judge a man by the size of his shovel. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
388 You do the rest of the shoveling while I take care of the car windows. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
389 The trick is to start before it snows 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
390 that was the day I learned,... size matters. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
391 Well Alice, does size matter now? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
392 7,439 … and a new Guinness world record! Now can I have my shovel back? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
393 I'm wishing it's sand. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
394 Don't toy with me. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
395 You young folks--always wanting to cut corners. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
396 Okay, son, it's your turn. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
397 What, you've never seen bonsai shoveling? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
398 Seymour has an epiphany - he's not left handed. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
399 Downsizing. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
400 Yes, yours is bigger, but I've got the moves. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
401 When *you* spend $130 on a hand-carved artisanal teak snow trowel, you'll understand. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
402 A smaller shovel really lessens the chances of a heart attack... 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
403 Where's your brother? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
404 It's a matter of perspective. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
405 Remember son, we are judged by results not the efficiency of our efforts. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
406 Don't give me that look; I'm not the one that has to earn my allowance. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
407 Something is just not right about this 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
408 Now wasn't that a lot more fun than building a snowman. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
409 It's how you use it. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
410 It's obvious that you are salaried and I am working by the hour. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
411 'And it measures heart rate, calories burned, and gives me up to date market reports.' 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
412 Remember son, use this shovel when they're paying you by the hour. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
413 How much more demonstration do you need? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
414 Son, one day you will understand how ironic this is. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
415 I like to sneak up on it. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
416 Don't choke up quite so much on the handle! 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
417 Lift with your legs. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
418 Anthropologie, I guess you went to Costco. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
419 Lazy millennial! 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
420 I get paid by the hour. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
421 Eyes bigger than your shovel, little man? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
422 No thanks. My wife said don't come back until it's finished. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
423 Son, smaller shovels equals fuller employment. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
424 I prefer aerobic exercise to weightlifting. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
425 Er, thanks, but I prefer the Conservative approach. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
426 Who knew hell is so white 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
427 Get on the path, son, use the path! Do you think I have all day? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
428 A mother-law will make you want to do strange things, Timmy. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
429 Dad, is this the one you wanted? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
430 Mine's a gift from my cardiologist. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
431 Yes Bobby, that's the one that gave your mother her bad back 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
432 I think I might have dropped that 20 dollar bill over here, try shoveling over here. I'm sure together we will find it. Don't give up yet.... 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
433 Son, it's a myth that size matters. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
434 You have the advantages in life that I didn't. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
435 OK, your turn again. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
436 One day when you are older Daddy will let you use the little shovel. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
437 I'm trying to fulfill my duty as your parent to demonstrate a cliché-laden metaphoric life lesson about the virtues of hard work, perseverance and overcoming obstacles; could you just let me? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
438 It's like you WANT me to go back to work. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
439 It's not as mismatched as it looks. Are you familiar with 'parallax error'? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
440 You see, there's an inverse correlation between the size of the shovel and the amount of character built. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
441 Final offer I'll triple your allowance for the shovel. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
442 No, I can't come dig you out! 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
443 It is all about leverage! 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
444 Size matters? Ha! 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
445 hurry up Bobby! Find the Dog! BARK! BarK! 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
446 I feel like we would make better progress if we switched shovels, don't you think? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
447 Where were you nine hours ago? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
448 Thank you son, but spatulas are a family tradition. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
449 Mom sent me out to tell you she lied; size DOES matter... 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
450 And then she has the nerve to accuse me of always taking the good pillow. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
451 It's really about economies of scale 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
452 I'll pay you double to cover the car up again. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
453 Welcome to Paradox. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
454 Finesse! Always finesse. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
455 Pretty good for old technology. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
456 Here, let me help you with the sidewalk. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
457 Sometimes a snow shovel is just a snow shovel. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
458 It's all a matter of perspective... 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
459 It was advertised as 'doing the job in half the time.' 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
460 It's not so much the size as the technique. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
461 Call my Boss and tell him I'll be there as soon as I shovel my way out. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
462 Picasso didn't shop at Sherwin-Williams, Billy. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
463 It's easier than a path to citizenship. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
464 One flake at a time—I'm practicing the Buddhist approach to snow removal. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
465 Yes, but see I get paid per hour. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
466 Mom says she needs her ice cream scoop back. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
467 It goes back to my prison days. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
468 It's the journey, not the destination, that matters. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
469 It was your mother's idea. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
470 It's called working by the hour, son. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
471 See? It's what you do with it. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
472 This sucks. We need to join the tiny house movement. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
473 Please, Trade now? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
474 I guess not everything is too big to fail. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
475 I'm boutique shoveling. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
476 Remember the story of The Tortoise and the Hare? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
477 I like to give the snow a sporting chance. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
478 See son - it's all in the wrist. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
479 The shovels are the same size. It's just an optical illusion. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
480 Hard work is the greatest tool. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
481 We moved here from Texas. All I have to work with is sand box toys. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
482 That's why Santa left YOU the big one son 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
483 Gotta get to the main roads 'cause I can't take another day of school called off for snow. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
484 When they tell you that size doesn't matter, don't you believe 'em. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
485 Technically, I don't think we're violating any OSHA rules. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
486 Is this yours? 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
487 But my one per cent is very important. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
488 Yes, but I need the exercise. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
489 Kids these days are so spoiled. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
490 Sorry kid, there's no app for this. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
491 I learned it all from reading "Rich Dad, Poor Dad." 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
492 And you promise we can switch after ten minutes? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
493 It's not about substance, it's about style. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
494 Get ready to come back in; I've almost finished the touch-up work. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
495 It is all in the knees. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
496 That's not cardiologist approved, son. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
497 My shovel started out that big 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
498 I want tone, not bulk. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
499 Okay, I'll triple your allowance if you trade shovels with me. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
500 Compensating? 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
501 Because I'm management, that's why. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
502 You know, Son, our old Mailman used to have a shovel just like that... 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
503 It's all in the power to weight ratio. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
504 Remember, son, your allowance will reflect your contribution. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
505 See Nelson, then I'll follow behind you and get the cracks. We'll be a great team! 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
506 It's your mom's idea. It's called The Zen Diet. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
507 When you get bigger, you can have this shovel. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
508 I'm an archaeologist, not a brute. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
509 I'm a southpaw, so your right-handed shovel is useless to me. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
510 You kids and your newfangled technology. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
511 You'll grow into it, then out of it. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
512 I was saving that for special occasions. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
513 I need to work on my negotiating skills. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
514 You mocking me, son. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
515 It's called Zen and the Art of Snow Removal, son. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
516 This must be what it's like to enter the New Yorker cartoon contest. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
517 Ok, so sometimes size does matter. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
518 Sometimes it's the journey, son. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
519 It's your perspective. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
520 The problem is you're holding it wrong. 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
521 See, it's how you use it that really counts 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
522 It's not the size of the shovel, son, but the speed of the deed. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
523 Snow and steady wins the race, son. 1.2727 0.14084 11 8 3 0
524 Well, if it isn't El Nino himself! 1.2727 0.19498 11 9 1 1
525 It's not the size of your shovel, it's how you use it. 1.2500 0.16366 8 6 2 0
526 Finish shoveling the grass but don't get any snow on the sidewalk. 1.2500 0.13056 12 9 3 0
527 I could have used you three weeks ago. 1.2500 0.13056 12 9 3 0
528 They say climate change has even messed up vanishing points. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
529 Get inside with that before your mother sees you. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
530 If you know so much about shoveling snow, why aren't you doing it? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
531 Mine has GPS. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
532 I told you, I prefer incremental change. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
533 No thanks. The last time I used that one it snowed a lot more the next day. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
534 Dream smaller. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
535 Son, this shovel has been passed down by the men in our family for generations. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
536 No, Tommy. Today we're working on your fine motor skills. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
537 How much for the large shovel? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
538 Small shovel, big exercise. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
539 C'mon now, like this. Bend, thrust, toss. Bend, thrust, toss. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
540 You know what they say, "It's not the size of a man's shovel. but the size of the 'shovel' in a man"...or something like that. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
541 See who else wants a snow cone. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
542 Ok, you win, the whole "in my day" thing was a mistake. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
543 Quit complaining! When I was your age, we didn't even have shovels. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
544 I'm sure we'll eventually find your retainer. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
545 So... size does matter? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
546 It's the shovel that makes the man... 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
547 You can do a lot with a little. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
548 Great ! Now you find the snow shovel. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
549 Does the house look smaller to you? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
550 Don't tell your mother. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
551 Put that back, it violates the HOA's 'Small Community' theme. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
552 This is one of those Goldilocks moments. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
553 Gosh! We finally got into the caption contest but the illustration is so ambiguous that nobody can figure out what to write. That's not funny. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
554 trade you 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
555 You've never heard of forced perspective? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
556 Again you want to trade shovels? 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
557 You know what they say, Big Shovel......... 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
558 Wanna swap hats? 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
559 I'm not sure pulling straws for the big shovel was the best idea. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
560 It saves work. When I use this tiny shovel, the snow always melts before I finish the job. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
561 It's not the size of the scoop in the snow, it's the size of the snow in the scoop. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
562 It's not about quantity...it's about quality. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
563 Stop complaining. You're the one who wanted to move to Russia. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
564 I know Kung Fu Panda 3 starts in ten minutes; I'm shoveling as fast as I can. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
565 Why do you always do things the hard way? 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
566 Want to trade? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
567 Forget the shovel. Go into the house and get your toothbrush to help daddy clean the walk. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
568 If you can guess my name, you get the big shovel back. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
569 Now you come? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
570 Sorry, kid, union rules. I get paid by the hour. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
571 I'm good at detail. You're a big-picture guy. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
572 Customer Service training isn't so bad. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
573 This is why you got a snow day. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
574 It's a lesson in politics, Jeffery. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
575 Just a little more and you'll be able to do your own house. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
576 Since I only get you on the weekends, I need to be creative with the character building exercises. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
577 Bigger isn't better! 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
578 Even after 25 years I still like to prove to your mother that size doesn't matter. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
579 Never bring a meta shovel to a proto snowfall. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
580 Did I complain when you got first pick on lawnmowers? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
581 Thanks, son, but you know that Daddy waits all year to enjoy artisanal snow removal. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
582 'Thanks a lot for the stocking stuffer." 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
583 See! Size matters! 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
584 Showoff! 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
585 Life's full of ironies isn't it? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
586 I told you I could do anything with this i-phone! 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
587 When I want your mother's advice I'll ask for it. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
588 It's called metaphorical shoveling. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
589 If I made it easy for you, that would be socialism. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
590 It's either this or I invoice you as an adult for your school clothes. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
591 So where was it? 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
592 Sometimes, size does matter. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
593 Perspective, my boy! 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
594 " What ever you do don't let mom know you found it". 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
595 I'm sorry I said I thought Trump had some good ideas. Now can we trade shovels? 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
596 Are you sure you still want the big shovel? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
597 It's a metaphor, son. Figure it out. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
598 It's not the shovel, it's the shoveler! 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
599 Remember, one small scoop at a time. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
600 Top one-tenth of the top one per cent? 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
601 And that, son, is the difference between capitalism and socialism. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
602 You're gonna hurt your back, bend at the knees. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
603 Put your wrist into it, like this. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
604 We all die in the end anyway, so what difference does it make? 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
605 You must have been trained by an undertaker! 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
606 Hank and Ernie simultaneously develop a bad case of shovel envy. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
607 Remember son, it's not the size of the shovel, it's the motion 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
608 Like I told your mother, it's not the size of the tool that counts but how you use it. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
609 Don't tell your mother what I've done with her spatula. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
610 If she is paying you buy the hour, you need a new shovel 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
611 Wanna trade hats? 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
612 Someday you'll find true love, settle down, and begin the life long quest for chores that take an extremely long time. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
613 If you bend your knees a little more, for leverage . . . 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
614 Attention to detail is snow laughing matter 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
615 It's the only one I own. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
616 Thanks, but I'll stick with what I'm using. I'm getting paid by the hour. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
617 How's that book report on Tom Sawyer going? 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
618 It's not the size of the shovel, but the snow that you move. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
619 It's not the size of the man, it's his equipment. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
620 I get it, Dad. Back in your day... 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
621 No matter what your Mom says, size doesn't matter. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
622 This is the easy part; there's the mortgage, the leaky roof, fuel . . . 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
623 I really thought he would grow into that shovel. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
624 I'm downsizing, son. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
625 Your problem is that you're lifting with your back instead of your legs. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
626 Just our luck. Heaviest snow in years and we get a cartoonist with no sense of perspective. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
627 Wow look at that cloud! Wow look at that bed head! Wow look at that coffee stain! 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
628 Hey Jeb, remind you of anything? A little goes a long way and a lot goes no where. 1.2222 0.14699 9 7 2 0
629 What? You said a little help. 1.2222 0.22222 9 8 0 1
630 Dad, Mom said take this shovel. She's sorry but size does matter. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
631 This shovel was the same size as that one three hours ago. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
632 It's time to swap places again. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
633 Thanks, but my cardiologist warned me against scooping too much snow at a time. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
634 No, I don't think this is funny! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
635 Sometimes size does matter, Fred... 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
636 I'm not sure what the lesson here is anymore either. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
637 While you stand there, these walks aren't going to shovel themselves. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
638 When I was a kid we shoveled the walk both ways. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
639 That's too big for snow cones 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
640 Stay out of my territory. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
641 See!? It's all in the wrist. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
642 I hope there's no snow in Hell. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
643 Tell your mother that size isn't everything. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
644 What are you complaining about? I gave you the good shovel. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
645 I'm farther away than I appear. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
646 Back in my day. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
647 Must be nice to be part of that one percent. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
648 You'll never find Mom with that one. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
649 I try to think of it as play rather than work. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
650 When I was your age, I had to walk 5 miles to school shoveling snow with that shovel. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
651 I think I've made my point how ridiculous our 2-party system has become. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
652 Bigger is better, huh? 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
653 I believe in quality, not quantity. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
654 If the Lord wanted you to have the smaller shovel he would have made me give you the smaller shovel. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
655 It's the journey. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
656 Never mind,I'm getting paid by the hour 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
657 Same snow, different shovel, eh, Bob? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
658 Sorry, I was using it to clear my Legos. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
659 Thanks. I'll take over from here. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
660 I did not belittle you 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
661 It's better for my FitBit! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
662 Haven't you heard of the butterfly effect? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
663 Your mom was right. Size doesn't matter. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
664 It's not snow, it's a metaphor for how the 1% pay taxes. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
665 Why use that when I've got this app on my phone? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
666 Your hands are too close together. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
667 "This is part of my new exercise regimen". 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
668 "After lunch, I've got dibs on the big shovel". 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
669 It's not the siaze of the shovel, son, it's how you use it! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
670 Holler when you find Jimmy Hoffa 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
671 Theres gotta be a Polar Bear under here somewhere. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
672 Don't try to 'snow me," kid. That's no magic shovel. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
673 Now you offer to help? 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
674 As you grow older, it just gets smaller. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
675 Thanks, but I'll be done in a couple more days. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
676 I'm being paid by the hour. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
677 Lift with your knuckles, not your back. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
678 Let's make a deal: We swap shovels and the hot chocolate servings mom is preparing for each of us. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
679 Don't tell your mother this is why it takes me so long. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
680 Yeah, with all the Global Warming talk I thought it was a smart buy. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
681 See jack, it's not the size that matters its the way you use it 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
682 The whole secret, my son, is finesse 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
683 Son, you're missing the "Zen" of snow shoveling. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
684 Watch me, son. Just one scoop at a time. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
685 Listen, when I was your age, I had to clear the walk with a toothpick! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
686 Sydney, I have a better idea. Lets go buy a snowblower. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
687 Dad, we need to switch back. This one is too big for the litter box. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
688 That one's fine for a rough-out, but if you really want it perfect you need one of these. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
689 Son, let this be a life lesson for you: sometimes the other guy gets the 'cushy' job! 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
690 Look, it's not my fault I'm left-handed. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
691 You'll learn how to milk a project when you're married, someday. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
692 Do ya wanna trade? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
693 Point taken, young man, but I don't see how the squeegee helps. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
694 Because, I'm not mechanically inclined, that's why! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
695 I can see Russia from here. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
696 Be ready with my chopsticks. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
697 Try to keep up. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
698 For the last time, I don't want to upgrade to Premium Economy. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
699 Go home Joe. She loves me and my micro-shovel. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
700 What the hell is in my hand? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
701 Getting paid by the hour is great, isn't it? 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
702 It's not the size of your shovel, son, it's how far you throw your snow. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
703 Switching our shovels just before Mom looks out the window never gets old. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
704 Earl was determined to prove that size doesn't matter. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
705 Clean off the roof. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
706 Because I'm a partner and you're an associate. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
707 My doctor prescribed this one. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
708 I think it's time to call a spade a spade. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
709 I'll race you to the corner 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
710 Morning, Ralph" "Morning, Sam 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
711 Son, remember this, never paint with a broad brush. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
712 Ok, you've proved your point that it's not size that counts but what you do with it. Can we go back inside now? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
713 Put that thing away. I get paid by the hour. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
714 Yes son, I have a small tool. But size doesn't matter. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
715 Barbie's shovel? I wondered why it was taking so long. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
716 Nah. My back's already killing me! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
717 You're not from around here, are you? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
718 Size does not matter if you have LOWBANDWITH. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
719 Winter at the Escher household 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
720 I don't want to go to work today! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
721 That's when it occurred to Jacob that he'd made yet another poor life choice. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
722 No thanks, son. I enjoy a more intimate contact with snow, 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
723 Some day, you'll look back and resent me 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
724 Careful son, that's not a toy. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
725 No thanks, kid. I get paid per shovelful. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
726 Sanders vs The big banks. An illustration. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
727 Before my operation that was my shovel. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
728 OK, you won the coin flip. When will you start shoveling? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
729 I told you, my son, size doesn't matter 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
730 You're overcompensating. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
731 Who does your contracts? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
732 ...and that's how Social Security works. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
733 You see? It's not the engine, it's the engineer. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
734 This is easier than that time we tried to boil the ocean. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
735 I'm in no rush. Company is coming to dinner if we get the snow cleared in time. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
736 Typical government overreach 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
737 See, Danny. This is the way we would do it back in the day. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
738 The guy at the hardware store said size doesn't matter 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
739 Yes it's lighter but I'm doing more reps 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
740 Wait till I tell your mother I did this with your shovel. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
741 Daddy has to micromanage everything. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
742 I think you're CEO material. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
743 Tooth fairy don't pay for lost. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
744 Don't bring a spoon to a shovel fight. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
745 Now you show up! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
746 Remember how I love bonsai? 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
747 Bend at the hips, not the low back. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
748 There are no shortcuts to success, son. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
749 I'm only two months into my subscription to Dollar Shovel Club. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
750 Now you can understand the dangers of big government! Your mother is the one who insisted on buying you that subsidized shovel! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
751 My snow removal incentive plan is based on the number of shovelfuls. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
752 It's the spoon nine out of ten escaped convicts recommend 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
753 See, it's easy. Just step, lift, turn, toss. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
754 It's the new iShovel--want to try? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
755 You finally get to be the bigger man and help, but you are just standing there. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
756 Sure, son, we can go sledding, but let Daddy finish his chores first. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
757 Well, maybe I just like a challenge. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
758 See, when I was a kid, all we had were tiny toy shovels! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
759 Less disappointment when the plow comes by. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
760 Can we trade back now? 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
761 How much more is it again for the shovel upgrade? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
762 I'll let you know when I need it. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
763 Do you have any evidence that I swapped mine for yours? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
764 It's all about the reps. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
765 El nino? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
766 You have just created a sidewalk to nowhere. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
767 Fancy a trade? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
768 It's ergonomic, you say?. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
769 Inefficiencies of scale. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
770 We weren't hired to shovel the lawn. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
771 "Walk softly and carry a big shovel" is not a thing. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
772 When I was your age we didn't have big shovels. We had garden trowels AND WE LIKED IT! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
773 Still think bigger is better? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
774 "Okay son, now that we covered proportions, let's move on to analogies". 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
775 Well son, size matters 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
776 Yes, I am the guy you saw last July cutting his lawn with scissors. Why do you ask? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
777 It’s not that hard, you’ve just lost your perspective. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
778 When you wear big boy pants, you use the baby shovel. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
779 C'mon son! success is 1% inspiration 99% perspiration 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
780 Size does matter! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
781 Good job, Dad. It's not the size of the shovel, but how you use it. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
782 Great, now we're an idiom. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
783 Next time I get to choose odd or even! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
784 I like the process. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
785 Tell your mom to get out here so I can finally prove to her that size doesn't matter. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
786 Yeah, and twenty bucks could buy two cases of beer, too. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
787 Yes that would be easier, son. Faster, easier, more seductive. Therein lies the path to the Dark Side. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
788 Son, it's a poor workman who blames his tools. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
789 By an inch is a cinch, by a yard is extra hard. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
790 Remember son, it's not about the size. It's about how you use it. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
791 Don't wait up. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
792 Not, I don't have snow shovel envy 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
793 Hey big guy, at least you are working harder than a Republican. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
794 Because, Timmy, I'm much more detail-oriented than you are. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
795 When you get to be my age, you'll get to use the small shovel too. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
796 - A Bad Case of Shovel Envy 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
797 My fitness goal is to tell my FB followers it took me 10,000 steps to dig out. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
798 Believe me, I am working twice as hard as you. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
799 That's because daddy belongs to the one percent 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
800 I'm from California; what's your excuse? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
801 So now they're making iShovels bigger? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
802 ...and spoil the fun? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
803 You can do a lot with little or nothing with a lot. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
804 Remember son, it's not the size of the shovel in a man's hand, it's the size of the man holding the shovel. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
805 There's no art in a big brush, either! 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
806 Well at least you can't accuse me of compensating for something. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
807 No, Son, I'm saving that shovel for the next round of the debates. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
808 Now, doesn't this prove that little things go a long way? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
809 Get busy , Gnomes don't get allowances 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
810 I prefer incremental change. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
811 I told you: size isn't everything. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
812 Son, let me teach you something about overtime. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
813 See son? I told you it's not the size that counts. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
814 Must get 10,000 steps...... 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
815 When you're older, you can use amphetamines like Daddy does. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
816 Give a call to Goldilocks to come on over with her shovel 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
817 Things may seem unfair sometimes, but don't worry. When you get older you will realize that they are always unfair. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
818 You're the one who wanted to change shovels! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
819 Because you haven't had two heart attacks, that's why! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
820 It is not the size thay counts, but how you use it! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
821 You see, son, the importance of tool size is just a myth. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
822 I got a better idea: Let's wait for a thaw. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
823 Bend your hips, and knees, and push your chest out. Lift the snow with your leg muscles, and keep your back straight. Like this. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
824 A little shoveling will do you good. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
825 I told my wife that I would help out around the house after I finished shoveling. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
826 Son, that's how I got my start. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
827 Little goes a long way. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
828 Great, you found it. Poke around with your foot a little. I haven't seen Bob since he borrowed it. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
829 Welcome to Dad's world. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
830 This is how the social security trust fund works boy. You put in that much, so I can keep taking out this much. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
831 You are shoveling snow - not election mud 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
832 Thanks for offering, but I'm getting paid by the hour. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
833 Didn't realize Dad had shrunk that much since last winter. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
834 It's all about leverage, my boy. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
835 If I borrow your shovel, am I acknowledging your existence? 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
836 Sorry, but I need the small shovel for precision digging. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
837 Another life lesson, son. It's not the sword, it's the swordsman. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
838 It was my first shovel. Mommy gave it to me before I could walk, OK. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
839 Thanks, but I’m looking for Mom’s wedding ring. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
840 I prefer small-batch shoveling. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
841 Trust me. In time you'll live to make moments like this last. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
842 I told you, it's the technique that counts. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
843 When you're a spatula, everything looks like a pancake. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
844 Not only does it work better but the Mexicans are paying for it! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
845 That's right, son . . . . Now yours is bigger. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
846 Watch me carefully, son, I'm about to teach you the value of pointless toil. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
847 The key is to lift with your legs... 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
848 Hey Ed, I just realized that's my scarf you're wearing! 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
849 No, this is not a 'metaphor' for anything, you little know-it-all. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
850 OK, I am finished with my 5 scoops son, time for your next five. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
851 Hey Fred! I got my new fun sized shovel with the candy wrapper coupon. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
852 You were the one who couldn't wait for a snow day. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
853 Thanks, but I really don't want to go to work today 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
854 As a matter of fact, "YES", I am trying to make a point. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
855 You're doing a great job Brownie. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
856 You wanted 'big shovel.' You got 'big shovel.' Now, just shovel! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
857 That explains lack of feeling in my toes! We wearing the wrong underwear, too.. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
858 It's a poor workman who blames his tools 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
859 I'm going to package it up and sell it to hipsters as "artisinal hand-shoveled" snow. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
860 The joy is in the journey. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
861 Your sister stayed on the sidewalk. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
862 When you get to be my age you'll realize that size doesn't matter. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
863 I think I can, I think I can. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
864 A little goes a long way when you're all hot and bothered. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
865 It's a toy you'll have for life. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
866 I charge by the hour not the job. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
867 But that's for snow. This is kitty litter. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
868 It takes a big man to admit he has a small shovel. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
869 Don't fall into this overachiever trap. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
870 No, I don't want to trade! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
871 This is the biggest one my doctor would prescribe. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
872 I'm compensating. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
873 Remember, son, it's not the size of the shovel that counts, but the size of the man with the shovel. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
874 Go see if Mom has warmed your cocoa, and remind her I'd like my reward shaken... 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
875 It's called detailing, son, and it's what differentiates us from those savages next door. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
876 Sow removal supervised by proper government agency. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
877 I told your mother I'd help out for a sec.... OK, back to you, Billy. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
878 Don't ever let anyone tell you that size matters. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
879 Another snow job! 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
880 It's a lesson on college tuition, son. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
881 You just have to put your back in it, son! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
882 Because it's the little details that really make the sidewalk pop! 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
883 Here's the scoop. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
884 I think I've made my point. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
885 I have a family history of heart disease 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
886 I've told you before son, it's about quality, not quantity. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
887 Body image issues? 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
888 Son, I know it takes a little longer but I find a spatula to be more precise. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
889 OK, that's one thousand for me. Now you do yours. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
890 My cardiologist recommended a heart healthy lifestyle 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
891 Thanks, but your mother isn't always right. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
892 Seriously? You've been sitting there with that shovel for the past two hours? 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
893 You want how much for that shovel? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
894 Dear, Looks great so far.Just a little more shoveling and we will be done. Way to go! 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
895 Trust me, son, artisan hand forged snow shovels are part of the new economic paradigm. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
896 At least yours doesn't make your butt look big. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
897 No, that takes all the fun out of it. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
898 No thanks, I'm good. I've got kind of a Zen thing going on here. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
899 It's not about size, its all about how you use it. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
900 Please Dad, Not another one of your when I was your age stories 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
901 Why when I was your age I had to shovel snow with a popsicle stick! 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
902 No thank you my son, I'm deeply devoted to my minimalism 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
903 I have a bigger shovel, but the wife wants to talk about feelings when I'm done. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
904 I think you've got my glasses also, this thing looked a lot bigger in the shed. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
905 Because anything worth having is worth working hard for it. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
906 Son, are you sure you want to use the big shovel??? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
907 How long did you look for my shovel? And why aren't you moving? 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
908 No. It's big man with a little shovel. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
909 Size is unimportant--it's all in the technique. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
910 Standing around again? We'll never get done at this rate! 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
911 Junior , are you sure that 'paper covers scissors' ? 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
912 Scalable, schmalable. I'm paid by the hour. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
913 Next winter, I will go with small spoon weight loss instead of this small shovel weight loss technique. 1.2000 0.20000 10 9 0 1
914 Your shovel will get smaller as you get bigger. Mine did. 1.2000 0.13333 10 8 2 0
915 Hey Dad, Mom says maybe you could use this instead of a spatula. 1.1818 0.18182 11 10 0 1
916 I can't stay warm using the big shovel. 1.1818 0.18182 11 10 0 1
917 A Garden Gnome's work is never done! 1.1818 0.12197 11 9 2 0
918 Remember, I get first choice of beach umbrella. 1.1818 0.12197 11 9 2 0
919 You can always use that as a raft when it melts. 1.1818 0.18182 11 10 0 1
920 See! - it's all in the knees. 1.1818 0.12197 11 9 2 0
921 Unlike some pathetic losers I know, I prefer to undercompensate. 1.1818 0.12197 11 9 2 0
922 Hey, grab a spoon and help me. 1.1667 0.18257 6 5 1 0
923 Your'e right, I am less likely to die of a heart attack with this shovel, but I'm more likely to die of old age. 1.1538 0.10415 13 11 2 0
924 I strive for quality, son. Not quantity. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
925 Mom's making bacon and eggs and she wants you to use this one. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
926 Go tell Mom she made her point; size does matter! 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
927 You see son, A poor workman blames his tools. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
928 Well son, gave you a good start. I'm off to the gym. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
929 It's just an optical illusion. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
930 Yes, the snow shovel would be faster. But global warming has been linked with using those. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
931 Size matters, son. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
932 Bernie, it will be a lot easier if you move to the left. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
933 No more calling 'Shotgun' 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
934 Son, size doesn't matter as long as you get the job done. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
935 Good news-- I scoped it out and from what I can tell you can keep it going for a while. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
936 Son, please leave that alone. That's for daddy to use when it really snows. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
937 This is what is called a teachable moment. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
938 It's not quantity. It's quality. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
939 Great future story someday for your grandchildren- on the plus side! 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
940 When we're done here, maybe I'll give you a sip of my hot chocolate. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
941 If you didn't want to help, why did you come out here? 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
942 Bend at the knees, not the waist. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
943 Zen shoveling can't be rushed. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
944 Junior, this is what I mean by counter intuitive! 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
945 Where were you twelve hours ago? 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
946 One scoop or two and with or without chocolate sauce? 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
947 I think buying a shovel at the mini-mart vs the mega- mall DOES make a difference! 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
948 Started yesterday morning. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
949 Was yours an impulse buy at Costco too? 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
950 Hey trust me. With climate change less is more....just wait. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
951 Brownie, you're doing a heckuva job. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
952 Come on mom, we have 5 more houses to do. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
953 It's an app called 'Snowblower.' Standard data charges may apply. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
954 You should be using your legs, not your back. 1.1429 0.15430 7 6 1 0
955 Being the bigger man isn't all it's cracked up to be, is it? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
956 It's not size that matters, Billy, it's scale. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
957 Told ya, size does not matter... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
958 Pick up the pace! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
959 Thanks, Jimmy, but this little baby ensures I miss the Academy Awards. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
960 Perspective is everything. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
961 Of course I said,"go back, Phil," not "go backfill." 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
962 You asked for the handicap. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
963 Hey - is that my hat? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
964 Less is more son 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
965 Remember, son, size isn't everything. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
966 This one keeps me out longer, away from your mother. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
967 You must be new to the job? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
968 One small step for mankind. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
969 Do you think maybe keep yours in place where it's a little easier to find next time? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
970 Junior held his ground, knowing that it was only a matter of time before Dad would accept the shovel's retail price. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
971 I'm good, I saw "The Revenant" last night! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
972 SCAB! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
973 No, really!" "If you have a better way of doing this I'd love to hear it! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
974 Grandma's house looks smaller than when I was your age. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
975 Oh, You're gaining on me, You're gonna catch me! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
976 Go screw yourself. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
977 We make a great team, son! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
978 I don't think you're worthy of Excalibur son. Try again after you finish your homework! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
979 In my day I had to use the big shovel, too. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
980 I found your brother...I'm glad we didn't use the snow blower.... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
981 I think there's another one in the garage that's just right. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
982 Son, no matter what they say to you; size doesn't matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
983 Quality, not quantity. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
984 Son, it called disruptive technology 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
985 It's all in the motion and leverage. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
986 We'll definitely have a good case for telling Amazon their product descriptions were inaccurate. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
987 Just once I'd like to see you finish a snowjob! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
988 It's not the size of the shovel. It's the volume of fried beans. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
989 Size isn't everything. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
990 And so you see, son, you can be stupid and have bad tools and still win the race. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
991 "A snow-shovel app?!", they said. "That's absurd!!", they said. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
992 My brain says yes, my back says no. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
993 Perspective matters! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
994 Sometimes decisions shouldn't be left to flipping a coin 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
995 Come on, son, let's play 'Shawshank Redemption.' 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
996 I don't care if you do speak softly -- get on the walkway. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
997 Son, please don't question my mid-life crisis... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
998 I'm the right fool for the job. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
999 Do you think you've got it now? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1000 Timmy, your mother and I have already explained our switch to small-batch snow shoveling. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1001 It's not the size of the shovel that counts. It's what you do with it that matters the most. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1002 Your suggestion is an intriguing one. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1003 The key is lifting with your legs. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1004 You see, Jeremy? Size doesn't matter! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1005 I did the math. We should have shoveled the same amount of snow. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1006 Bend your knees more and flex your wrists. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1007 Thanks, son, this one's fine. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1008 It's not your ambition to shovel; it's shoveling your ambition. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1009 Expensive doesn't always mean more efficient. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1010 Overcompensating for something small again, are we Mr. Smith? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1011 Which song would you like to sing next? "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall", or "If You're Happy & You Know It, Clap Your Hands"? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1012 Smaller shovel, smaller chest pain. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1013 I'm setting a personal best on my pedometer. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1014 Bar mitzvah, bar shmitzvah, Neil; today you are a man. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1015 You need to put your back into it, like me. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1016 Santa's finally starting to dig out! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1017 I suppose you're still using a landline too. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1018 I don't know about you, but I'm headed to the beach. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1019 Someday you'll understand -I work for the city... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1020 It's not the size of the shovel in the hand... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1021 It's just a matter of perspective. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1022 I bet you're "feeling the Bern" now dad. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1023 I don't know what this thing in my left hand is either. Ask the cartoonist. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1024 Consider it a valuable lesson. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1025 I’m making a carpel tunnel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1026 I'll help you this time, but when I was your age, I didn't stop to rest until I finished the job! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1027 You said you wanted big-boy toys when you took my iPad. Well, here you go. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1028 I'm not sure the redistribution of snow shovels was a good idea 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1029 I'll be a while! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1030 Now--after 9 hours? Seriously? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1031 The web site said: 'true-to-size.' 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1032 My what a big shovel you have...and mine is too small...Mom's should be just the right size to finish...let's go in, game starts in 15 minutes. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1033 It helps me to meet my FitBit goal. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1034 It's all about the technique. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1035 Do you still think size doesn't matter? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1036 It's not the size that counts. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1037 Aren't you the same kid that offered to shovel my walk two weeks ago? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1038 I told you to bend with your knees. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1039 That would've been useful two hours ago 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1040 You see, son, always set low expectations and you will reach your goals. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1041 I don't care any more what my Fitbit thinks of me! Hand me the big shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1042 Watch me son-it's all in the wrists. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1043 That issue of The Watchtower in my bathroom isn't just going to replace itself! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1044 This is fair, Mikey. You eat for free here 365 days a year. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1045 technology wins again. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1046 Take a lesson from me- don't dry your shovel on hot. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1047 Put your whole body into it! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1048 Upstate Ergonomics 101 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1049 I told you, we can build a snowman just as soon as I'm done shovelling the walk. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1050 Please thank your mother, but remind her - bigger isn't always better. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1051 the winter gets me down! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1052 Every little bit helps 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1053 I'll take it from here. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1054 Big is as big does 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1055 I suppose you're going to complain about the wage gap too. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1056 Wanna switch? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1057 Misguided shovel ready workers fall for snow job! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1058 Thanks son, this shovel app is not quite cutting it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1059 Still believe everything Al Gore tells you? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1060 Honey, what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1061 Don't worry! When you're my age there won't be any snow left. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1062 I don't know which is deeper and more annoying, the snow or the metaphor? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1063 Stop complaining. The more you grow, the smaller YOUR shovel will appear too. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1064 And John weeped with happiness for he knew his son's shovel would be bigger than his own 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1065 It's all I can afford, living on Bank Interest! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1066 I wanted a more hand-crafted, artisanal look. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1067 Efficiency at it's best. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1068 Well, I don't care what Bernie would say. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1069 This is Vermont, Homer. In keeping with Bernie Sanders philosophy about taxes, let's switch snow shovels. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1070 It's not the size of the shovel, it's the scraping of the paving. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1071 We do Common Core later!!! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1072 Ready....aim.... Fire... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1073 I keep telling you: Size doesn't matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1074 I wonder how long you have been out here. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1075 You call it unfairness. I call it seniority. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1076 No. I don't think snow is mentioned in the Bible. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1077 Well son, as we say say in I.T., it's the operating system, not the hardware, that makes the difference. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1078 Take this job and shovel it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1079 Well, I call dibs on the hot chocolate, then. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1080 Thanks son. But this spoon is doing a fine job.. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1081 Um, I don't think this is working. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1082 No two Flakes are alike! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1083 Tell your Mom that I am not being stubborn. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1084 Mama says you're wrong: size DOES matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1085 I know life is unfair thank you very much. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1086 But the flakes are so small! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1087 I'm gonna need a bigger shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1088 This better be the last of it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1089 Now is not the time to search for your frisbee. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1090 It may be small, but I know what to do with it and the wife's just happy I can go so fast! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1091 No, thanks. I'm working on a 12 step program. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1092 That's taking the easy way out! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1093 Yeah, but I read somewhere, in Florida they have a python infestation. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1094 ITS OK, I'M A REPUBLICAN 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1095 Bigger is not always better son. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1096 Hey dad, still think size doesn't matter? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1097 Your allowance is 10,000 shovelfuls that way. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1098 Depending on your point of view, each of us could be considered liberal or conservative. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1099 Good system. One full shovel for you, one for me. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1100 For the last time, my name's not John Snow, I know winter is coming, and stop staring at me with those blue eyes.... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1101 Your birthday wishes are getting more and more unsettling. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1102 Sorry Mom, I stepped on a crack! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1103 ...and that is why Daddy needs his big truck. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1104 It was the whiteness of the whale that above all things appalled me. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1105 You have a bright future in upper management. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1106 Let that be a lesson to you. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1107 Don't you always say bigger is better? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1108 Remember son slow and steady wins the race. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1109 The Sun'll come out, Tomorrow, Tomorrow...... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1110 It's not about size, son, it's about technique. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1111 Remember, it's not the size, but the motion. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1112 Who is your father, he is way too harsh. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1113 Does this shovel make me look fat? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1114 It's a journey, not a destination. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1115 Shrinkage 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1116 Got it, oxymoron! Now back to your homework! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1117 You see, it isn't the size of the tool that matters. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1118 Quickly, before the kids come! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1119 Brevity is the soul of humor. -Shakespeare 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1120 Who's the little man now? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1121 That little garden gnome... always so superior. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1122 Stop son, we told Mom we are only doing a little shoveling. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1123 If you think this is so funny go audition for the Coen brothers! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1124 They say today that small is the new big. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1125 You should pay attention to the details... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1126 Should have had another son. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1127 Tell your mother I saw her shadow and will be back in six weeks. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1128 Pretend I'm the CEO.Think of this as a reality check for the American dream. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1129 Jared was beginning to regret buying all his garden tools at Novelty Goods, Inc. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1130 Is this what you were looking for? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1131 If memory serves, you eat peas one at a time. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1132 It's not the size of the shovel, it's how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1133 I suppose you want a participation trophy. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1134 This is how my father plowed snow, and this is how you will plow. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1135 Anyone can move snow. It's only a true artist that can shape it and let it tell it's own story. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1136 I told you before size doesn't always matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1137 See it's not the size of the shovel that matters, it's the person using it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1138 When I was your age, we didn't have those big fancy shovels - we shoveled or snow with a spatula, and were grateful for it! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1139 Pathfinder. Please. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1140 When I get done shoveling, I'll give you something to reflect on. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1141 El Nino, my son, isn't this ironic? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1142 The auction said, Snow Help. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1143 Watch me son, it's all about leverage. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1144 Remember, it's all about leverage. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1145 A little shoveling does the body good. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1146 Mom's great with her new snowblower. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1147 You know what they say about guys with big shovels. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1148 Hide that thing, kid! I'm paid by the hour. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1149 Wanna trade? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1150 Once again, you have failed to catch my drift. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1151 Perhaps we should trade? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1152 It's one small step for man, one giant leap for a lawn jockey. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1153 Time to trade, yet? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1154 Sharon bought Larry a nice garden trowel for Valentine's Day. He mistakenly thought he outdid her with a snow shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1155 I think I took her "size doesn't matter" too broadly. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1156 Archimedes would have loved this. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1157 Just like my wife always says, "size matters." 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1158 I think we should trade shovels. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1159 Tough, grow up kiddo! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1160 It's so beautiful! Make it last, son! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1161 I don't get that new technology. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1162 Son, you should ever send a man to do a boys job. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1163 Charging by the hour, not the inch kid - try it! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1164 My cardiologist recommended a trowel, not a shovel! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1165 Compensating for something? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1166 Whaddaya mean you have a blister? When I was your age, we used to do this barefoot, uphill, both ways 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1167 'Lets pretend I'm Trump and your Bush." 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1168 By my age, you’ll believe that size doesn’t matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1169 Dad, I will give you a quarter to get off your cell phone and finish the walk. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1170 Son, you'll never get a government job with that kind of thinking. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1171 See son--it's not how big it is, it's how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1172 And this son, is how I get paid more on an hourly basis. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1173 You had your choice, now shovel the driveway. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1174 Size doesn't matter. It's the enthusiasm that counts. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1175 Haven't you seen the Shawshank Redemption? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1176 All about confidence! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1177 The doctor said it's best for my heart. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1178 The iShovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1179 It takes 10,000 hours to master as skill, son. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1180 Size isn't the only thing that matters. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1181 Don't just stand there. Help me. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1182 One small step for man, one giant leap for canine. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1183 All I know is that I have never hurt my back shovelling snow when I use this shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1184 Believe me son when I tell you size doesn't matter. Just ask your mother. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1185 After an hour or so, we'll switch shovels again. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1186 the moment they realized he had taken his artisan phase too far. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1187 Sometimes a shovel is just a shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1188 My boss wants me at work when I’m finished. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1189 It's because I expect big things of you, son. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1190 Someday you will understand and appreciate the difference in "hourly wage" and "salary wage" 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1191 Lonnie always seemed to pick the wrong Monopoly piece. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1192 It's all in the technique. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1193 Don't look so smug, I charge by the hour. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1194 It's not the size of the tool that counts, Nora, it's the size of the effort...oh, never mind. Hand me the big shovel, please. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1195 It may be small, but I know how to use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1196 The boy and the father are cleaning the garden because its snowed and the father take the kid's showel and the kid takes the father's showel. so the kid is doing the all work... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1197 ''Like me, lift with your legs.'' 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1198 This seemed like the fairest division of labor for you to earn your allowance. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1199 I still swear the private sector is more efficient. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1200 Suddenly Jack realized, size does matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1201 There are better ways to impress mommy 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1202 Well? I'm waiting. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1203 Keep at it, Mom. I'm sure my little pail is down there somewhere. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1204 You kids are always rushing to get things done. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1205 See? I bend at the knees, not the waist, and my back doesn't hurt at all. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1206 And you're telling me there's a "scientific consensus"? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1207 Sidewalk trimming distinguishes true snow shovellers from the rest. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1208 Size is important but you have to know how to use it too. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1209 What do you mean I'm a micro manager? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1210 Women lean in, son. Men lean on. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1211 It's in the wrist. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1212 Man up and get back to work. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1213 Honey, stop playing and come dig me out. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1214 Learn, little man: The secret is: there's always "the right tool for the right job." 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1215 I think I used the last of your little blue pills. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1216 Size matters less when you get to be my age. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1217 Awkward! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1218 You kids think you're so smart. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1219 Here kitty, kitty, kitty... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1220 No really, you've done your share. So let's trade back now, okay? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1221 This is my "me" time. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1222 With you it's always about presentation! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1223 For me, 'Backwards Day' is losing its charm. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1224 Look, See? The small shovel works just fine. Now quit your complaining. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1225 My character is sufficiently built . 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1226 I'm not the one who left the snow blower out all night. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1227 Communism will fix this. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1228 Quality not quantity; remember that lad. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1229 Look, I appreciate that you're licensed, bonded and certified, but I think I can handle this myself. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1230 That's all right, son. As you can see, I'm a shoveling fool! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1231 Judge me when you're married. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1232 Laugh all you want but the Fitbit won't lie. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1233 Your mother wants me to teach you about fairness. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1234 "978,979....I was right Mr. Know it all. It takes your shovel more scoops than....heeeeyyyy 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1235 If you didn't want the push shovel, you should have said so. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1236 But Mom told me size really *does* matter 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1237 Now I know what it feels like to shovel in your footsteps. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1238 It's all about billable shovels full. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1239 Back in my day we hand shoveled and we like it ! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1240 Next you will be demanding a snow blower. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1241 Remembering back, Jack realized that his father always found ways to make him feel small and incompetent. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1242 I see the cartoonist drew you the wrong size shovel, too. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1243 Perception's a bitch. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1244 Shoveling my way to the store. Need anything? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1245 How about you clean out the litter box and we call it even? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1246 I'm union, kid. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1247 Son, what part of "artisanal" don't you understand? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1248 Found it! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1249 It's Shovel Time! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1250 Are we having fun yet? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1251 OK, Quincy, you get the big shovel and in return you promise not to tell mommy about Mrs. Wainwright and me. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1252 Well... you can tell your "real" dad that your mom is very pleased with my little shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1253 The groundhog lied. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1254 Don't think of it as a big shovel, as much as a big character builder. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1255 Son, it's not the size, it's what you do with it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1256 'Six hours, almost done, my back's killing me and NOW you're Mr. Wise Guy ?' 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1257 And remember that when you talk to girls 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1258 Maybe there's a better way to do this, Phil. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1259 Watch me for a minute. See? You've gotta use your LEGS. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1260 You're lucky. Back when I was a boy my father wouldn't help me like this. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1261 And that, son, is the history of Social Security. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1262 Well, this experience has certainly given me a new perspective. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1263 Size may not matter to her, but it does to me. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1264 You should see the driveway 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1265 Remember this, "Bigger isn't always better". 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1266 Who says that size matters 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1267 Put your back into it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1268 Another three hours, another foot. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1269 It's not the size of the tool, it's how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1270 You see son, size really doesn't matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1271 Next year, You can use the iShovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1272 Now do you believe in ergonomics? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1273 Mom's new boyfriend lives in Florida. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1274 Son, you are all shovel, no snow. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1275 No, son. I use that shovel when I'm being paid by the job rather than by the hour. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1276 ... and toss. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1277 Go tell your Mom, that just because she found our snow shovel, does not mean I need to use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1278 You know, son, it wasn't too long ago, that I would have needed that big shovel for a job like this. Now I can do it all with my smart phone. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1279 Do you think maybe your whining is why Mommy drinks so much? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1280 I'm sorry you think this is a snow job." 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1281 I found him on Angie's List 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1282 There isn't an app for that! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1283 Just follow my example and we'll be done in no time. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1284 Son, put the shovel down! I need to give you a key memory for your later adolescent rejection of me. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1285 It's not the size of the shovel, it how you move your hips. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1286 It's all in the ergonomics. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1287 It's not the size of the shovel, it's the size of the heart that matters. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1288 Son, I think you have Daddy's snow shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1289 Mac wondered if they'd had more than one child would he still be using the sand castle shovel to clear the walk. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1290 Son, stop playing in the snow. We've got work to do. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1291 It's not the size of the shovel in the snow, it's the size of the man with the shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1292 You can use the Back Saver 2000 when you're the parent. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1293 No, that's the litter scoop. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1294 Don't forget, the government contract pays per shovel! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1295 So here's the technique, Bobby, but you'll get a lot better leverage with that shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1296 Keep Working and you'll get the hang of it Louie. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1297 Then again, if we were smart about this we'd move to San Diego. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1298 Okay big shot. Now see if you can find our mailbox! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1299 Next I'll show him how to play Ping-Pong. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1300 Remember, my boy, it's not the size of your shovel but how much Elvis is in your pelvis... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1301 How the hell did I get the short end of the stick? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1302 That is one small scoop for a man and one giant one for man's kind. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1303 I wish I never took him to see Trump's helicopter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1304 Shovelling snow is hard work, at least from my perspective. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1305 Someday son, this shovel will be yours. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1306 Don't judge a shovel by its size. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1307 This is almost as frustrating as the New Yorker caption contest 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1308 I tell you kid, it's not the size of the tool that matters, it's what you do with it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1309 Stop telling me to check my privilege. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1310 So, does size matter? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1311 It's what the 1% call fair and balanced. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1312 Euclid called it an extreme and mean ratio, if you remember. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1313 'See ya next winter, kid' 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1314 Hey, these aren't my glasses. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1315 Remember son, it's not the size of your tool that counts, it's how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1316 Put some muscle into it, son. Like this. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1317 Put some elbow into it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1318 Daddy when can I upgrade to the IShovel 6 PLUS? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1319 Can you believe your mother calls me a perfectionist? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1320 Just remember, son: Size doesn't matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1321 I have an idea: let's switch coats. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1322 My mom says it's to bad you don't have a bigger one, and then she laughed. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1323 I think the guy at the hardware store's interpretation of the democratic primary is a little crude. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1324 My ex- was right. It does count. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1325 And when it all melts, I have a shot glass you can use to clear away the flooding. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1326 Lean in. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1327 Just wait! I'll let you know when it's your turn. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1328 You see son, this is socialism. This is why Sweden is covered in snow. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1329 This isn't as funny as I thought it would be. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1330 Make America great again my ass!! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1331 A sled? You don't want one, I've seen Citizen Kane. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1332 The shovel shaming continued for another winter, and Wally wondered if he'd ever emerge from his father's shadow. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1333 Don't overexert yourself, Junior! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1334 Kids today. They want everything right away. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1335 Just how many more snow cones are you planning on making, son? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1336 I really hate my job. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1337 Straight A's = small shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1338 Put that away, we are paid by the hour. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1339 See? This is exactly what's wrong with your generation. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1340 It's not the size of the tool that matters. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1341 Hurry up, shorty. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1342 Linda's biggest mistake in life was reassuring her husband that size doesn't matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1343 But don't start thinking you're too big to fail! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1344 Shovelry is dead. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1345 At least you can use yours as a sled. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1346 Studies say this prevents heart attacks. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1347 symbolically,son, these last few inches are always for the man of the house. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1348 Son, if anybody tease you with "size matter" crap, you remember this day. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1349 I disagree with you - size DOES matter! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1350 Oh! So now, all of a sudden size does matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1351 No, thanks... With this one I only have to worry about suffering a wrist attack. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1352 Its too big for the sand box . 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1353 Stop shoveling outside of the box! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1354 Whew. Rob, are you sure by door-to-door the campaign manager meant from the front door to the door of the polling booth? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1355 Because I'm wearing my Fitbit. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1356 It's the latest iShovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1357 When you're married you'll understand. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1358 Son, you'll never find the end of this walk playing with that thing. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1359 Because you speaks so softly, that's why. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1360 My dear, it's not the size of the tool, it's its correct application. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1361 And so ends today’s lesson in humiliation. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1362 But where's the fun? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1363 Buy your shovel for 5 bucks, kid? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1364 If size mattered you wouldn't be here. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1365 Oh, good. Finished building your 'Wall Against the Rising Tide of Stephanie' next door? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1366 Compensating? No, I'm not 'compensating'. You? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1367 Son, bigger isn't better. Faster is better. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1368 It's called Crossfit. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1369 My boss says I need to be more mindful. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1370 I just heard spring is right around the corner. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1371 I'm gonna cut you, little man. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1372 Remember, son, size doesn’t matter. It’s all in the technique. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1373 This is not a trick, son, I'm just in my second childhood. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1374 No, this doesn't mean you can trade your twin bed for my king-size bed. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1375 I know, I know you're winning in both "Poles"! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1376 Mom said either way you're going to grandma's. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1377 Have you noticed, whenever we shovel Gahan Wilson's walk, something weird happens? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1378 No thanks, I'm working on my triceps. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1379 You'll be done in no time. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1380 I'm paid by the hour how about you? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1381 Reverse psychology 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1382 It's mostly the perspective! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1383 Papa, I bet if you used Nadkins you could handle the big shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1384 I'm not prepared for global warming. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1385 Another task failure by management. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1386 That's a Big Boy shovel. Big Boy politicians want us to do more with less. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1387 Think lose-lose. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1388 Son, you know that's our display shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1389 You said you wanted equality of opportunity 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1390 Hey Buddy, feeling a bit of 'trowel envy' are we? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1391 I read Marie Kondo and this was the shovel that made me the happiest. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1392 Repeat after me; "Government contract!" 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1393 Dad, is there a moral in this? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1394 Son when I was a boy my father didn't help me with snow removal. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1395 What do you mean by 'snow shovel equality?' 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1396 And on that day, Maurice taught his son a lesson that all the men of the Sorenson family have had to learn before him... it's not about the size, it's how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1397 Time to Switch. That's 4 hours. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1398 It was your bright idea to level the playing field. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1399 The devil is in the details, son. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1400 I've been told it's more about how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1401 Even Robert Mankoff would say there's something wrong with this picture. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1402 Switch? We are being paid hourly! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1403 Now can Daddy have his wallet back? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1404 What's wrong in this picture? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1405 Yes, I promise to put it back in your sand box when I finish. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1406 When you grow up, you get to use the little shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1407 You say you want to trade? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1408 It's not a race son. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1409 Stop singing the theme from '12 Years a Slave'! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1410 You see son, this is what balance of power means! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1411 'Of course size matters!' 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1412 Mom wants her spatula back! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1413 Would this have helped? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1414 You're not getting much leverage. Grab it closer to the handle. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1415 First one to shovel out the car gets to drive. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1416 Son, you'll be able to speak loudly and carry a small stick when you have your own children. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1417 Size doesn't matter; it's all about how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1418 No, I am not micromanaging. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1419 Tell your mother I'm not pouting about the snowblower. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1420 Where did you say your segway was? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1421 If I suffer from low self esteem, you're at the other end of the spectrum. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1422 I told you, son, I don't want to use that thing. I'm getting paid by the hour. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1423 It's called seniority son.check with your union rep. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1424 To each their own workout routine. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1425 Size doesn't matter, it's what you do with it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1426 Your mother insisted I complete a 12-step program. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1427 I'd rather be grilling. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1428 It's either this or I talk to your mother. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1429 This is one of those perspective puzzles, right? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1430 Why am I doing all the work with 1/50th of the shovel? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1431 Drop dead, you useless midget! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1432 Miley's here. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1433 Life inside the snow globe had become too predictable. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1434 Now it's your turn. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1435 Big feet. Small shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1436 Lift with your legs; not with your back. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1437 I said do your best to make Dad look "athletic" not "pathetic". 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1438 Size really doesn't matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1439 But Bernie says this is the only fair way to share the labor!!! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1440 When you get older and have kids, you too can be unfair. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1441 Can we please switch already. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1442 You seen the medium guy? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1443 Its not the size of the shovel, it's the fury of the attack. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1444 It's not the size of the shovel, son. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1445 In my day, we shoveled snow with a spatula. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1446 I haven't seen this much snow since Clapton in '75. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1447 Because, Jimmy, we don't care about keeping up with the Joneses. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1448 Still working on that first shovel full? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1449 Told ya. It's not how big it is, it's how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1450 You just have to put your back into it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1451 I'm sure the counselor will hear about this next week. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1452 You shovel, I'll scoop -- it's called division of labor. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1453 Welcome to the 99%. . . 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1454 Little help? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1455 Where's your pail? I want to take a bath later. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1456 You're right, it's all in the wrist! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1457 Where's you ox, Paul? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1458 You kids and your damn technology! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1459 It's not the size that matters, it's how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1460 Son, I'm not going to sugar coat things; size does matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1461 I wish your brother were here to use the medium shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1462 So old-school 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1463 Let this be a lesson to you, son. Never bite off more than you can chew. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1464 It's not the size of the shovel that matters, is's how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1465 What a tool!!! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1466 Still wanna take turns? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1467 I'll give you mine if you give me yours. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1468 No, thanks, I'll keep mine. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1469 Your father's no wussy! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1470 And THAT is what is meant by inversely proportional. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1471 Mom said yours wasn't big enough. I assumed she meant the shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1472 You must be salary, I'm paid for the hours. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1473 Naw, I need the exercise! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1474 See billy! You're mother was wrong, size doesn't matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1475 Choose life. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1476 I've been trying to get Margie out of her 'bigger is better' mindset. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1477 Yes, I'm a congressman. Why do you ask? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1478 Son, this is how Social Security works. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1479 Well, you'll love it when this goes crazy viral. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1480 I just use a simple scoop and toss method. Piece of cake. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1481 So how do you like Canada so far? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1482 It's all in the wrist, and I have the touch! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1483 The path of least resistance? Never heard of it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1484 God loves a lonely hero, son... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1485 Lift with your legs, Tommy, not your back. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1486 I'm teaching you about the national debt. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1487 "No, it doesn't correspond to my shovel size!' 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1488 I lost a bet, what's your excuse? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1489 Once Mommy finds her newspaper, she'll unfreeze Billy's hands. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1490 Size isn't everything. Ask Mom. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1491 Mathematically, we should finish at exactly the same time. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1492 Working hard? Or hardly working? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1493 You shovel the snow. I’m curating it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1494 New iShovel? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1495 First one done gets to do laundry. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1496 Mom says size doesn't matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1497 One day this will all be yours. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1498 Piece of cake, son. Why don't you finish up. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1499 See? The cold DOES cause shrinkage. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1500 It's not how much snow you can push, son, it's how much of the sidewalk you can clear. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1501 You realize there's an app for that. Right? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1502 You shoveled the heavy snow now let me handle the light snow. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1503 Don't forget we split it fifty-fifty. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1504 For the last time, I'm sorry I forced you to take your allowance in shovels. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1505 Slowpoke. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1506 It's not the shovel. It's how you use it! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1507 I propose we forego lengthy negotiations and swap shovels now before the snow melts. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1508 I didn't know that they made these in different sizes. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1509 Yes, I know. If I use the bigger shovel I'll get to work faster. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1510 See what whistling while you work will do for you? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1511 Are you in my way? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1512 Maybe Bernie can figure it out. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1513 Hey kid, get off my lawn. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1514 It was at that moment Herbert was glad he had bought the insurance on his cell phone. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1515 Maybe it's still not too late for law school. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1516 Your allowance just became non-non-negotiable. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1517 Maybe when you're through shoveling the lawn, you can mow the sidewalk. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1518 Sorry, this is more exercise. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1519 ... and in high heels, too. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1520 I saw it on "Escape from Alcatraz." What's your excuse? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1521 Did he say a 100 foot path 36 " wide or a 36 foot path, one hundred inches wide? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1522 I use my toothbrush for the lighter stuff. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1523 Oh, *that* other shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1524 It's all about attitude! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1525 I smell a sitcom! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1526 You won't be afraid of clowns anymore after we build a healthy fear of hypothermia. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1527 A New York state of mind. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1528 No, thank you. I promised your mother I would reduce my carbon footprint. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1529 I thought this was taking more time than usual 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1530 Get out of here kid, I get paid by the hour. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1531 Because your father is a trained archeologist. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1532 Son, when you grow up you will learn that effectiveness is not the same as efficiency. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1533 See, son? It's not the size -- it's how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1534 This is how we do it in prison 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1535 Why Are You Shoveling? It's Going to be 50 Degrees Tomorrow. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1536 Ha! It's not the size of the shovel, it's the devotion to motion! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1537 So just like this for forty feet and repeat. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1538 Dad, not THAT kind of compensation. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1539 All I'm saying is it's a matter of perspective. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1540 see, it sucks with the big shovel too...... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1541 El Nino made me do it 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1542 To the confident, son, size doesn’t matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1543 Let's just stick with the plan. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1544 This new app is great ! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1545 All shovel. No action. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1546 That's a buck a shovel full, Sonny--minimum ten. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1547 You should see how I paint the house in the summer. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1548 Size matters. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1549 If Bernie wins, we all get medium sized shovels.” 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1550 Ah. You must be the boy sent to do a man's job. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1551 It's 2016. Aren't robots supposed to do this? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1552 You'll learn as you get older. It's not the size, it's the motion. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1553 It ain't the size of the tool that matters, son. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1554 Go ahead, take your time with your huge shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1555 I can't wait for this 'Freaky Friday' thing to get undone. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1556 Some day you'll appreciate daddy's artisanal snow craft. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1557 Like I told your Mother, size doesn't matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1558 I said I liked the 'concept' of role reversal. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1559 I do hope that you appreciate the value of my efforts at providing a direction for your future occupational endeavors... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1560 One day, you'll have a little one. Just like this. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1561 You know what? Let's move. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1562 I have the best intentions. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1563 High tech is no use if you don't know how to use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1564 If size mattered, I'd still be shoveling alone. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1565 Remember son, it's not the size of your shovel that counts. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1566 I accidentally brought my Florida sand shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1567 Maybe I shouldn't do this while I am stoned! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1568 Put that away, Son. We're getting paid by the hour. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1569 If you think that's big, you should see my... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1570 Once an an archeologist,,,,, 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1571 Big shoes.....small shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1572 How much did you want for that damn shovel again? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1573 You'll learn. My father died of a heart attack. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1574 It's not the size but what you do with it that counts. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1575 We can change shovels for the driveway, okay Billy? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1576 Fred always believed it was 90% attitude. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1577 As you get older, son, you'll realize that it's the little things in life that make a difference. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1578 Don't let anyone lie to you, size is everything. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1579 It's all in the wrist Billy. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1580 When I was your age, we didn't even have SPATULAS! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1581 Hi Mr. Gibbs, my Dad borrowed your shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1582 I'm just putting the finishing touches on what you started. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1583 I told her it wasn't the size of the shovel that mattered! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1584 Determination and attitude always trumps method. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1585 Let me show you. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1586 It's not all about size. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1587 If it's the last thing I ever say, "Bigger is not better." 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1588 Being the little spoon isn't as fun as I thought 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1589 Tell your mom I enjoy oxymorons! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1590 Just five minutes and then I get the big boy shovel again. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1591 Back in my day we had to shovel with our tongues. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1592 I know, baby - you'll dig it the most... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1593 OK, OK, I get it! But at least you can fly coach! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1594 Be right back after I feed the dogs and hook up the sled. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1595 Never mind what mom says, it’s not the size that counts. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1596 Put it on the spin cycle and use a hammer to pry loose the porch. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1597 One small scoop by me, one giant walkway cleared. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1598 This would be a funny New Yorker cartoon. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1599 Kinda symbolic, ain't it? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1600 These little shovels work great for this Monsant-snow!!! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1601 I guess size really does matter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1602 Away troll, I'm not throwing my back out again. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1603 Mine is too small. Yours is too big. Come on, let's switch hats. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1604 You've got to lift with your legs. Watch me do it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1605 Never mind. I'm in no hurry. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1606 I told you we should have picked up the milk and eggs yesterday. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1607 On average, they're both perfect. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1608 I need a little break, Son. My back is killing me. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1609 No, son. Like this! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1610 Hey, it's not the size it's how you use it. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1611 I only use that one for political snowjobs. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1612 Pass the salt! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1613 The moment irrational optimism met rigid pragmatism. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1614 Come on, Willie, I used to walk to school barefooted in this stuff. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1615 We all feel inadequate, kid. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1616 If my scoop is ten times smaller, when will we finish Johnny? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1617 Hey pal, you need to get a new perspective 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1618 It's the motion that counts. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1619 Again Son ... it's all about perspective. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1620 Come on, Tom Sawyer is going to let me do his driveway too. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1621 No! Your prices are too high. It makes more sense to do it myself. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1622 I have no idea what you mean by 'economy of scale'..... 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1623 Mommy says you need a bigger tool. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1624 Hey Kido when ae you going to learn to use the right tool? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1625 Wrong! Slow and steady does NOT always win the race. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1626 Let this be a lesson to you--always choose the 1% shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1627 I have less character to build. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1628 Bigger isn't necessarily better, son. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1629 Hey Stanley, I'm thinking that maybe we should trade shovels? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1630 It's quality not quantity, kiddo. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1631 Maybe now you'll learn the difference between metric and imperial. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1632 Tomorrow we'll get into guns vs. butter. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1633 Double, double, toil and trouble; To each man cursed: the wrong size shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1634 Mine has GPS and voice guidance assistance. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1635 Now do you believe me that size doesn't matter? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1636 You knew I was a short order cook when you asked me to help. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1637 Winter is not the season for Freaky Friday. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1638 Wait a few years kid, and you'll understand. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1639 Hey, low energy. Pick up the pace. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1640 Complain softly and carry a big shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1641 Don't be a Sisyphus. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1642 We'll never survive this winter if we fail to keep things in perspective. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1643 Oscar, run inside and get Daddy the salt shaker. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1644 Stop sighing. I'm doing my bit. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1645 It's all in the wrist, son. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1646 Don't just be a Yard Gnome, get to work! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1647 How's Freaky Friday working out for you so far? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1648 My normal job? I work for the government. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1649 Where do I get one of those? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1650 You see, Marty? It ain't the size of the shovel that counts! The big-dicked man will always shovel faster. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1651 Son, don’t think for a minute that I haven’t learned a thing or two from my years working for the government. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1652 Mom says to use this to shovel the walk unless you want her to flip the burgers with a plunger 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1653 See it's easy...I'm sick and tired of little people like you complaining all the time! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1654 Hey dad, we've been out here doing our sidewalk for 6 hours, can I go in now? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1655 Hurry up! Speed is more important than quantity. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1656 Hey, kid! I hope you know that yours won't be that big forever! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1657 Because the hard way builds character, Timmy. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1658 This is my fetish. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1659 It's the city drones, Charlie! Shovel faster before we get fined! 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1660 Apparently you don't know how to use yours. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1661 Are you sure it isn't a snow day? 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1662 No. I don't know what happened to your shovel. 1.1250 0.13363 8 7 1 0
1663 I'm a big person. It only looks smaller. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1664 You're still not getting a bigger allowance. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1665 At my age, I'm just happy to be able to shovel at all. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1666 I'll be back soon. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1667 Darn, that's not our house. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1668 You see son, it's not really work, if you love what you do. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1669 No ad hominem. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1670 I asked my teacher today about child labor laws. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1671 When I'm finished we'll build a snowmidget. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1672 Once I'm done here, it's off to the beach for the sun and sand. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1673 So much for one size fits all. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1674 Bend your knees and lift with your legs, not your back. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1675 I don't care what Mommy says. You tell her that this is the most I can lift after my massive heart attack last week. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1676 It makes me feel closer to my ex-wife. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1677 Hey, this division of labor appears to be very asymmetrical. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1678 Hurry up, you've got work tomorrow. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1679 Whaddya mean "size matters?" 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1680 Pancake flipping titles are won in the off-season. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1681 So much for 'size matters.' 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1682 Trowel and Error son. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1683 Shoveling is like making love. But I forget why. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1684 What are you waiting for, we don't have all day. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1685 Time for Daddy's Little Man to step up and pull his weight. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1686 My shovel is half full 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1687 I guess the saying also applies to shoveling snow. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1688 I'll be down to the corner by spring time. You can just hold that there. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1689 That was grandpa's, may he rest in peace. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1690 That's not a shovel, this is a shovel. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1691 I agree, Art, but the doctor said humor her, and she's still watching. 1.1111 0.11785 9 8 1 0
1692 This looks good Junior. Now it's time we tackle that roof. 1.1000 0.10541 10 9 1 0
1693 And, the far too late, it dawned on Mr. Friedman: "Perhaps the market doesn't always efficiently allocate resources." 1.1000 0.10541 10 9 1 0
1694 That's it. Aim high. 1.1000 0.10541 10 9 1 0
1695 "Admit that the free market disproportionately favors those who inherit means and I'll give you the snow shovel, Gary." “Go to Hell, Linda.” The 2016 election cycle had created an increasingly hostile environment in the Johnson household. 1.1000 0.10541 10 9 1 0
1696 Remember, it's easier if you lift with your legs. 1.1000 0.10541 10 9 1 0
1697 When I was your age, even the snow banks looked huge. 1.1000 0.10541 10 9 1 0
1698 If we keep at it, we can make Vegas by nightfall. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1699 What do you mean I've "lost it"! I saw it in the basement! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1700 I wonder if he will be an adequate son-in-law. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1701 I'm a pollster looking for angry voters. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1702 Had enough, big shot? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1703 Precision and follow through get you better distance than brute strength! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1704 We'll get more done when Mom gets here 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1705 I guess you're right. Every family has one over achiever and a one under achiever. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1706 I knew you were waiting for me. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1707 I'm an artist, not a garage painter! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1708 Can you hand me the strawberry syrup please? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1709 The weather forecast did call for a chance of erasers today. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1710 It's called haute scoop-ture. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1711 Not what I expected when you said I could trade for new hand tools. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1712 Don't look at me like that, Archie. It's called damage control. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1713 It's really all a matter of virtual perspective. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1714 Don't out kick your coverage 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1715 Keep shoveling!! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1716 Would you believe I have a bigger Johnson. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1717 Marty got the extra large because he had something to prove. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1718 A little bit goes a long way. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1719 Think we should swap shovels ? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1720 Do the math Mr Mensa. THEN lecture me again about this making a mountain out of a mole hill thing! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1721 Let this be a lesson: It’s not how big it is, it’s what you do with it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1722 I've just... had too much time on my hands, okay? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1723 No bombs Grandma, snowballs. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1724 The Power of Small 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1725 See George size really doesn't matter 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1726 Next year I'm buying a smaller shovel! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1727 I'll bet Smith's shovel is juuuuuuuust right. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1728 This was much easier when we shot Fargo. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1729 Don't forget the roof! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1730 I still think they were worth the free shipping. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1731 I'm going to tell Mom that you made me use the big scoop. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1732 I don't think you're trying 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1733 i'm running to the store to get a smaller shovel, lol. forgot you were tiny 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
1734 Oh my, I'm using Bernie's shovel and I do "Feel the Bern." 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1735 There must be better ways to narrow the gender achievement gap. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1736 This would be easier if you used the spoon & I used the shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1737 Tell me again how you don't leave footprints. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1738 Fairness was never part of shoveling the walk. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1739 I know you're just trying to protect me, but, when your mother said she was tired of me shoveling it all the time, I don't think is was snow she meant. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1740 Your not much help! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1741 Millennials... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1742 The Slow Movement doesn't take a snow day, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1743 Work smarter, not harder is for pussies, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1744 Meanwhile in Canada... 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1745 I've earned my right to lead by example. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1746 I named my shovel "El Nino" 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1747 Son, it's not the size that matters. It's the way you use it. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1748 Wax on, wax off, wifeyson! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1749 OK. It's your turn. Bring your shovel and come and help Daddy. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1750 Technique is the key, my boy, not size! Remember that. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1751 I am leaving, going to Florida 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1752 We haven't had a lil'easter this bad since I was your age. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1753 When we're done, you can have a little hot chocolate, and I'll have a big scotch. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1754 Hard on the back; easy on the wallet. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1755 Honey, I shrunk my snow shovel and grandpa. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1756 My wife says size doesn't matter. (Note to editor: sorry in advance) 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1757 Because our people come from Lilliput, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1758 No, you little dweeb, size does NOT matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1759 Lift with your knees, Pops! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1760 See? What you wanna do is lift with your knees. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1761 Like I said, you were very fortunate to use the large snow shovel after I fliped the coin. Heads you won and tails I lost. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1762 I'll be shoveling snow until the another snowstorm arrived in one month! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1763 I'm preparing for climate change. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1764 Don't look so smug - I'd have won the bet if it weren't for global warming 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
1765 It's speak softly and carry a big STICK 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1766 I think there's a mix-up here... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1767 It's not the size of the wave, it's motion of the ocean. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1768 Now you can see for yourself how important it is to eat your vegetables. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1769 You'll understand when you're married, Son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1770 What's your excuse now? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1771 Don't be knee deep in snow, therefore, use the sidewalk! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1772 Looks like you could use a little help 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1773 Tell your mother I am on my way to work. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1774 Who said you could wear MY hat?!? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1775 Hey neighbor - say hello to my 3D printer... 1.0000 0.11785 9 9 0 0
1776 Are they really teaching that 'possession is 9/10's of the law' in preschool? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1777 I hope the readers can put things in the right perspective 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1778 And was it fair when you got to go first into the lifeboat on our cruise last month? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1779 True, but Frank Gilbreth never had to spend Sunday afternoon with your mother and her sisters. 1.0000 0.22361 5 5 0 0
1780 Well, if you don't think it's fair, you should've corrected grandma when she called you the big man of the house now. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1781 Speak softly, and carry a big shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1782 Don't let them see you take a break, son. We get paid by the hour. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1783 Will you be done in time to take me to school? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1784 No!! You'll poke yourself in the eye ! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1785 You can use my shovel next time 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1786 I would ask but I think I already know the answer. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1787 You know, my mother told me not to marry a man that couldn't lift a shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1788 I don't know if this is the right lesson, Bob. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1789 Which way's up? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1790 Son, Monday morning is a very bad time to renegotiate your compensation with the boss. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1791 It's about quantity, not quality 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1792 Just developing my street cred, folks! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1793 It's called perspective, Son. Didn't they teach you anything in art class? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1794 I told you, let me do the edges first. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1795 I can guarantee there are no heart attacks in your future! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1796 $100.00 and not a penny less. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1797 You don't bring a small shovel to a snowfight 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1798 I'm following the Yellow Brick Road. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1799 Weather permitting the right one's ineffectual on the main path. . . 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1800 This is the last time I'm flipping a coin with him. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1801 Advances in artificial intelligence oblige us to increase the demand for manual labor. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1802 Are you calling me a liar? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1803 Reminds me a shovel was needed after a recent Presidential Debate. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1804 Arm wrestling to decide who gets to use the 'big boy' shovel is fun isn't it, Danny? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1805 All that work to die a virgin! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1806 It's all about how you use it. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
1807 IT'S NOT ABOUT HOW BIG IT IS 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1808 "Bring your child to work day" for shovelers? Never again! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1809 I'm not moving until we have a little more parity and..... you can put MY shovel back in the sandbox where you got it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1810 Leaning in is key. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1811 No, tax laws aren't anything like this, Son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1812 What I lack in efficiency I make up for in self-satisfaction. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1813 Why not an upgrade 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1814 Feel free... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1815 Smell the air! How great for the environment that we got rid of that gas guzzling snow blower! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1816 Thanks, Jimmy. I'll take it from here. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1817 You're gonna need a much larger shovel to dig your way out of this one, Howard. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1818 YOU...ARE...THE 99 PERCENT! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1819 There's more to inequality than just income 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1820 See how easy Daddy makes it look? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1821 O Canada 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1822 "It's quite simple: Quality over Quantity. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1823 Listen, kid. Someone gave you a snow job. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1824 Did you find the kids yet? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1825 Not with my bad back. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1826 Now you shovel the side walk. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1827 You are a little boy who needs a big shovel so he can grow up to be a man who gives himself the small one 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1828 you know what they say about a man with a big shovel 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1829 Sometimes, size really doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1830 Don't suppose you're one of those honey-eating bears... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1831 Are you really sure you want to trade the easy job for the hard job? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1832 I told you: It's speed, and not size, that matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1833 Jack Sprat thought it was time to mix things up 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1834 On second thought, I would like to switch shovels. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1835 No thanks Hun. The lack of NFL has unleashed the Sisyphus in me. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1836 'Mama's calling' 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1837 You are so disappointing. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1838 I'm making the heart attack wait. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1839 Boy, That Sriracha Ice Melt works wonders 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1840 Life ain't fair, so there! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1841 Back in my day, there was no such thing as "physically impossible". 1.0000 0.09535 11 11 0 0
1842 Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There’s nothing like having a midget for a butler. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1843 You should see my umbrella. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1844 It would be so nice if you weren't here. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1845 It's not a race...Zippy! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1846 Ned thinks to himself, if I have the right tools and cooperation we can keep this path open and safe. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1847 I'm almost done! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1848 Arthur King thanked Mrs. Lake's stepson for his timely gift. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1849 New item! At Costco. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1850 First life lesson for you son. "Size does not matter". And if you don't believe me, ask your mom. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1851 I think the Post Office screwed up on our delivery again! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1852 Should have castled earlier ! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1853 Hey!, you wanted the big shovel 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1854 Now I Know What They Mean By : Shoveling It Against The Tide ! 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1855 Don't forget that tonight I get the big bed with Mommy. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1856 You'll be sorry when you're a grandfather someday... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1857 i have a feeling were in michigan 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1858 It's not the size of the shovel that counts,It's the size behind the shovel." 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1859 A tale of two shovels. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1860 Chip off the "old block", once removed. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1861 Hey, I let you pick first. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1862 Switching shovels would be more productive, but your Mother wanted it this way and she's the boss. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1863 Thanks for all your help son 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1864 See. It doesn't matter how big it is. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1865 This debunks that myth…size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1866 "Now you understand that size doesn't matter. It's what you do with the tool you have," he explained to his son with the full knowledge that if genetics were to be trusted, it was a lesson he would use again later in life. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1867 Absolutely that's Santa's shovel! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1868 May I please please please go over to the Johanssens' house now? They just got a snowblower. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1869 It's time you learned about working for senior management. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1870 It's not the size that counts. It's how well you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1871 It's not the size-it's the motion. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1872 You just finished 'Tom Sawyer' ? How did you like it ? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1873 Whoever said life was fair? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1874 It's okay, no need to help, it's just stuck in snow. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1875 Today is 'Opposite Day'. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1876 School starts next month. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1877 It's heavy because it's filled with hopes and dreams 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1878 Good "d" but I'm doin' the alley-oop for the second floor. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1879 Great job, honey. Now go inside and get the saltshaker. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1880 The little guys always have the biggest toys. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1881 Is your mother sure this will help me shovel off the pounds? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1882 Dear lord, it wasn't funny the first time... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1883 this is a red state we always screw the little guy 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1884 Hey...I'm just scraping by! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1885 Trust me, there's no App on there. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1886 We're the 'Lenny' and 'George' of 'Snow And Miniscule Tools' eh? Enjoy, my friend. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1887 Gee Dad, the weatherman didn't mean to shovel just one or two inches. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1888 Summer 2020 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1889 Want to borrow mine 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1890 It's a Zen thing. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1891 Looks like we each had a coupon at the Shoddy Shovel Shop. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1892 I see you've found the pool. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1893 I'll get a Nobel Prize for this. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1894 Yes I overcompensate. People with small shovels often do. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1895 Frank discovers that size does not matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1896 O K, kiddo, last pitch. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1897 I'm more of a details guy 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1898 This is analogous to an argument I always have with your mom about size. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1899 What makes you think, that I'm trying to avoid you? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1900 Snow shoveling is not in the Winter Olympics but your scoop looks good. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1901 Believe me it's better than a bar mitzvah, and heck of a lot cheaper! Mazel tov, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1902 When you finish the lawn, I'll fix you a sno-cone. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1903 As soon as I'm done shoveling, I'll come help you with the well. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1904 I'm still wining Big Boy! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1905 your app! better than mine! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1906 Don't like the coin flip idea. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1907 Effort and technique matter more than size. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1908 It was his last bet. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1909 Your mother told you size matters, didn't she. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1910 No Dad, not until you tell me where babies really come from. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
1911 When will you learn that size doesn't matter?! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1912 I told you. It's not the size that counts; it's how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1913 DID I TELL YOU MY DIET DOESN'T SEEM TO BE WORKING EITHER? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1914 Hey kid face it, you lost the coin toss. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1915 Yes, job-creation is a bitch 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1916 Oh, now! When I was just your age, they gave me this paint-scraper. Do you hear me whining? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1917 No wonder you're being bullied in school. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1918 And that, my boy, is what "Capitalism" is all about. You just keep shoveling, see, and I come back later to reap the benefits. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1919 My, aren't we passive-aggressive today. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1920 This is a direct result of "outcomes to efforts". 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1921 2016: A mini-shovel-using parallel universe is saved from oblivion by the appearance of the child prophet. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1922 This snow removal app is amazing! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1923 Oh, no -- that was last year; it's the neighbor's turn. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1924 Get the drift? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1925 Compensating much? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1926 The wrong eyeglasses again? 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
1927 I'm tired of these kids clearing out the stores before we can even get to them. And then they can't even use what they bought. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1928 Don't believe women who tell you that size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1929 Just follow my lead. It's called style over substance. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1930 It's the economy stupid 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1931 I don't want to look like I'm overcompensating. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1932 It's not the size of the shovel, but the speed in your heave. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1933 You're right, Honey. Size really doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1934 Need a little help? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1935 Little, big. Big, little 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1936 I know what you're compensating for. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1937 I hear hot chocolate calling, son. Please tell me you hear it too. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1938 Your wife also likes it bigger. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1939 You could have helped. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1940 If you think that's too large, 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1941 Because sometimes it's nice NOT to use the one-size-fits-all option. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1942 When you grow up, I promise you can use the little shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1943 No thanks, I rather savour doing it my way 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1944 He with the largest shovel clears the way only for himself. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1945 "Heart-healthy California Walnuts" to you, too! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1946 I'm practicing for the civil service exam. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1947 Are you sure they gave us the right tools?? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1948 If you do the sidewalk, I'll build the snowman. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1949 Get used to it, kid. This is how Social Security works. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1950 Eek Gad, Junior!? You'll get a heart attack! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1951 I suppose there was an app for that, too. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1952 Still don't want to trade? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1953 Hey, dad, can I have my shovel back? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1954 You ARE the best snow shoveler in the whole, wide world, Tommy! Now can we trade back? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1955 Ladies and gentlemen the next president of the United States in Donald J. Trump 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1956 I'm gonna miss this stuff. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1957 Didn't I tell you on your first birthday that life wasn't fair? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1958 Too large, too late. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1959 You win this round, ballbag. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1960 Your seem quite happy with that bat! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1961 Next time like usual, sonny. See, here's the SCOOP: If I get home in time, the missus insists we go to the Trump rally... . 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1962 Stop your bitching--I keep telling you that you need to lift weights at the gym 1.0000 0.22361 5 5 0 0
1963 Thanks son, that would be faster, but then Daddy would be telling fibs to his boss about not being able to get in to work all week. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1964 It affords more precision. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1965 Can I get you an orange syrup? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1966 You know, it's not the size of your shovel that matters, it is how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1967 Mom's got her glasses on backwards again. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1968 Would you call this the Jonas Brothers? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1969 You oughta be in snow business! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1970 Well, son, It's because I have something called a union card and you don't. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1971 When you are my age, think what you'll be able to tell your kids you did when you were their age. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1972 Undefeated! My snow spatula once again vanquishes your snow shovel. Boo-Yah! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1973 How...how long have you been watching? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1974 Hey Stan, I've been meaning to ask you to join my Linkedin network? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1975 Puh, millenials. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1976 Take that back to your mother -- it's more fun using this one. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1977 We'll discuss increasing your allowance later. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1978 Son, did you ghost write the Art of the Deal? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1979 See what I can do with a little tool? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1980 Stop with your lying Billy, my shovel is much huger than yours. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1981 Mom said the walk needs to be shoveled but my doctor told me not to push heavy snow around. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1982 Don't you know how to use that big shovel son? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1983 It's how you use the tool not the size 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1984 Always have the right tool for the job, son. That's what my daddy taught me. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1985 I'm telling you man, it's not the size of the shovel that matters... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1986 Mom wants her spoon back. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1987 You're path-etic! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1988 Your mother would approve, only just don't tell her. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1989 No. Perspective just makes it look small. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1990 Say son, choke up on it a little. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1991 Can you finish drawing this cartoon so I can see the punchline 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1992 At least you do not have to mow the lawn for a while. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1993 The cold truth about perspective. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1994 Ok, Son...Daddy's turn to be middle manager. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1995 Damn Walter, back at it again with the snow shoveling. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1996 I've got your back. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1997 "Get out of the well. Stop playing with that ceiling roller and give me a help". 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1998 Sometimes in life son size really doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
1999 I get paid so much a shovel full....how about you 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2000 Its not just about the size of the shovel! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2001 Any other merit badges to work on after Community Service? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2002 I think you are pushing the envelope on this delegation deal, Dad. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2003 ... it's what you do with it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2004 That's what she said. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2005 Damn Roy, when you started shoveling the snow, you were 5ft 7 inches tall! Now look at you! I need a drink, fast! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2006 Happy "freaky Friday" George! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2007 Big guys little spoons, little guys big spoons! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2008 Let me guess—you're voting for Bernie. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2009 As I told you during our talk, size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2010 It only looks bigger because you're so small! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2011 Bite me! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2012 There's an app for that? 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2013 Honey, we're getting paid by the hour. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2014 I was moving white off the curb like shoveling snow. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2015 That's the problem in this family. Our perspective is all messed up. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2016 Sure, heavy weights are an option but, I choose light weight and repetition! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2017 OK..you win, clap and switch. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2018 No thanks. This is the least I can do . . . and I always enjoy doing the least I can do! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2019 Sure, I'm a sadistic little bastard, but at least I can clear my browser history. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2020 We can use this snow day to learn more about capitalism, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2021 Is that a lawn gnome or just a really small man? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2022 ... and that's why the marginal tax rate doesn't make sense either. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2023 I know you're from Atlanta, but that's ridiculous. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2024 Good job Timmy. We managed to shovel the walkway and get in a lesson on resource distribution at the same time. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2025 a big winter means big things! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2026 Thank you my son, put your mother went out of her way to buy me this wonderful shovel last Father's Day 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2027 Our shovels are the same size. The cartoonist just created an illusion - now get the freak back to work. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2028 It's not the size of the shovel... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2029 This is as good a time as any, and better than most, to have my second childhood. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2030 Really? Where was it? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2031 I'm tithing. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2032 I try not to paint things with the same broad brush. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2033 Oh, s'now you get off the iPad. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2034 What a Napolean Complex! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2035 I'm willing to read today's newspaper online just this once. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2036 'This is a sample of asymmetrical warfare.' 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2037 I thought you asked for a snow job! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2038 What do you think I,m trying to say? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2039 Put that back until your grandmother leaves. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2040 Soon as we're done here, we'll switch shovels, and I'll bash your head in. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2041 Yes Son, nothing seems as it was since Trump. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2042 xx 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2043 It's from Costco, duh. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2044 Here she is son... I'll dig her out. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2045 I'm part of the 99percent. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2046 Don't make me spell out the life lesson, Junior. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2047 No wonder my underpants felt so small lately. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2048 How about we play again, this time best of three? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2049 Well, it's easier than that escherian stairwell game... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2050 Have you seen Goldilocks? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2051 This doesn't make any sense! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2052 Slow down and enjoy it. Come July you'll be missing this! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2053 I got this shovel at the Republican convention. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2054 Remember to lift with you knees! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2055 Bend at the knees, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2056 Your shovel dramatically captures the essence of pure winter bliss. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2057 Hey, I thought I told you to pick up a shovel at the union hall! 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2058 Well the weatherman said two inches, that's enough outta you 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2059 My purpose? My purpose is to make a man of you. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2060 Exhausted, Phil suddenly sees potential for a lucrative product liability case. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2061 I'll stick with mindless persistence. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2062 You can put it back now. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2063 Bigger is not necessarily better -- it depends how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2064 Sad news...my hamster just died. So, how's your pet tiger doing? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2065 After you finish the lawn, start on the roof. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2066 That's foolish. You pick the one right tool. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2067 I don't suppose you've read Oedipus Rex? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2068 Four Seasons' strikes 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2069 I know I lost the bet about the weatherman, but please give me a pass on the driveway. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2070 Shoveling snow really gives you perspective 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2071 Now, it's time to upgrade my shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2072 ....and that's the difference between Hillary and Bernie's campaign funding strategies. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2073 Hey Ralph, you're good at standing next to a shovel. Didn't you work for the Roads Department at one time ? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2074 Your mother is completely off base, son. Size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2075 ''IT ALSO DICES , SLICES , AND JULIENNES ''. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2076 I told you short and steady wins the race. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2077 See, son: it's not the size of your trowel that matters. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2078 I'm paid by the hour... so shove it, kid! 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2079 Are you sure you don't want to trade shovels? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2080 Dad, why don't we just move to Siberia? 'Cause your mother enjoys her yearly program. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2081 See son size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2082 Stop saying your thing is bigger than my thing! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2083 If you need anything, I'll be by the pool, in St Barts. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2084 The Ironics never fully appreciated their family name. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2085 Good job kid, but I've decided to pave paradise and put up a parking lot. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2086 Shut up and keep shoveling. Do you think little Jesus ever complained about shoveling snow? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2087 Harry, so how was your life going since we swapped wives? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2088 What do you mean "small"? It's technique that matters, not size. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2089 For only $5 you can rent my big shovel tomorrow morning. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2090 It's a legacy tool. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2091 At this rate, I should get some help from the thaw come April. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2092 Don't stop clearing the walkway, you lazy kid, your shovel is bigger than mine 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2093 Son you got a big shovel that's for sure but if you don't push I'll beat your tush! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2094 Oh gnome you didn't! 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2095 Don't worry, I make it up to you at dinner, I 'll take the bigger steak. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2096 I get your drift. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2097 Watch how I do it Son. This is just one of many techniques I have for staying married to your mother. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2098 Most winters, I have measured out my path with coffee scoops - one at a time. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2099 What made you think Hell would be warm? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2100 Oh, so now you're finally saying size does matter? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2101 Chill out, it's just snow buddy. No pun intended. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2102 Who ever said, size matters. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2103 Apple's shoveling more than snow with the iShovel! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2104 And I had to walk five miles to my school in a blizzard, and it was uphill both ways. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2105 You millennials and your high-tech gadgets. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2106 I like a challenge. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2107 It's the little things in life that count. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2108 No, thanks. It just needs a trim. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2109 Hey, can we switch - can I borrow your hat? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2110 Get used to it, son. We live iin Siberia." 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2111 The world isn’t fair . . . or efficient. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2112 Who said life was fair? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2113 I thought you like pretend games. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2114 I still can't tell if size matters! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2115 The secret is, kid, that it's better to take a long time doing one chore than having time to do a lot of different ones. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2116 Snow guzzler! 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2117 Now you tell me. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2118 The question isn't who let me take your shovel; it's who is going to stop me. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2119 Technique, my boy. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2120 Last one in is a rotten egg 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2121 I'm not being difficult Dad, that's just your forced perspective. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2122 Dad, I think you're 'feeling the Bern' in a way that's not very helpful. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2123 Keep at it, two hands and use your knees. 1.0000 0.10541 10 10 0 0
2124 Ha, we just went digital. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2125 Really pushing for that inheritance aren't you? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2126 Shovel size means nothing. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2127 Your mother has some explaining to do. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2128 Stay on the beaten path, my boy. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2129 Let's have a fair exchange. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2130 Just goes to prove that size doesn't count. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2131 After the neighbors caught Dale fetching the paper naked, their mocking grew merciless. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2132 But I heard you tell Mom, size doesn't matter! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2133 You should do that my way. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2134 How many more houses? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2135 Bernie was right. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2136 It's not how big your shovel is, it's how you use it. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2137 Overcompensate much? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2138 Consider it a $5.00 upgrade with a Sig.given That Where were you last week when I started this project? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2139 All I did was put a few big ones on the Cardinals 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2140 Honey, it's a lot easier if you hold the shovel like this. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2141 This is a teaching moment Fred: Size does not matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2142 Take my advice. It's not about size; it's about how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2143 There's gonna be some shrinkage if it snows any more than this. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2144 these kids are early adapters 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2145 Why is his spade is bigger than mine? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2146 Don't gloat, son, that you got to the garage first. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2147 I told you slow and study always wins 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2148 Yea well its the journey not the destination ,right 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2149 Thus, you see, son, coffee is God! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2150 For my audition, I'll be tap dancing as I shovel off to Buffalo. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2151 so, how do you pronounce it again? Florida? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2152 Son, remember quality trumps quantity when offering bespoke snowflake removal services. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2153 Now who's laughing at my shovel app? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2154 Is that what they've been teaching you at that fancy school of yours? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2155 I could have sworn the keys fell out on the path. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2156 I know your mother is always saying size matters, but we'll just show her size isn't everything. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2157 Best cocaine harvest in a decade. Thanks, El Niño! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2158 When you feel tired, use my snowplough. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2159 Son, when you're married you will understand. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2160 When I started shoveling this walk there was no snow. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2161 Yes, I know what your other grandmother thinks! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2162 Like I keep telling you, it's confidence not size that matters! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2163 Hey dad, you know you don't have Scalia on the Court to protect your rights anymore. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2164 Nah. I'm trying to make this last until after the election. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2165 I don't suppose you'd want to consider a swap...? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2166 I'm from Buffalo. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2167 let's switch shovels. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2168 It's called the quicker picker upper 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2169 Honey, we make a great team! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2170 Hey buddy I think you need some hot chocolate. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2171 Are you sure the Amazon drone got the right addresses? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2172 In progress: A snow life mural 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2173 Smartness over brute force! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2174 Come on, kid, it's not the size of the dog in the fight... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2175 I will shovel your social security check and you shovel mine, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2176 I'm proving a point to your mother. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2177 Just going to make sure that washing powder commercial is kosher. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2178 I thought size mattered too, once. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2179 Biggest computer, biggest ice cream, biggest toy...but OH NO! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2180 It's easy if you put your legs into it, like this 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2181 I keep hearing your Mom, she needs you inside. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2182 This is what happens when shovels are issued according to need! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2183 Get your head out of the gutter, son! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2184 One day, when you're old enough, this will be a useful metaphor 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2185 'We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.' 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2186 I think I finally know how you feel 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2187 You continue to be a massive disappointment. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2188 Honey, stop pitching. I told you, this isn't a bat! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2189 You're right - this wet snow is really heavy. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2190 See how I use my knees, and not my back, to put the snow in the neighbor's yard? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2191 Go tell your mother it's too late for an apology!! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2192 That's what's wrong with your generation, no finesse.. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2193 Martha is teaching her 7-year-old son the value of speaking softly but carrying a big stick. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2194 Your shovel is behind the tax wall, that's why. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2195 Granny. It's not the size of what you have, but what you do with what you have. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2196 The little shovel that could. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2197 Looks like we have a future President of the United States in the family. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2198 when I though I have it all 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2199 Son you must realize age and wisdom will always win over youth! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2200 Keep burying yourself John. You can't make snowballs until your testicles are properly frozen. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2201 . . . So then I said, does size really matter? And, well, here we are. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2202 See son, I told you it's not the size that matters, it's how well you use it that counts! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2203 Harvey wanted his back scratched. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2204 I'm very good at micromanaging. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2205 I suppose we should have expected this from Winter Storm Goldilocks. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2206 Still life with still frozen 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2207 Size matters... so do the heating coils under the sidewalk. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2208 I'll have time to listen to your idea AFTER we finish this incessant shoveling. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2209 Son, we just have to use the gifts God gave us. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2210 I make the most in life with what I have, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2211 My milkshake brought all the boys to the yard. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2212 Let's go inside and have some 1/16th scale hot cocoa. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2213 Am I going to the right? No, I'm just turning to smile at the audience. You think I should I use a big shovel? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2214 I'm going to make an abominable snowman. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2215 Overcompensating, sonny? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2216 What do you mean I'm lacking perspective? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2217 Yes son, that's the one I meant. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2218 Yes, but it's quality snow. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2219 See Prudence, like I've told you for years, but you wouldn't believe me...size doesn't matter." 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2220 I always new size didn't matter 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2221 Fifteen bucks an hour and the third grade stands down. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2222 If we switch back again then you'd be no better than Trump, is that what you want? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2223 Have you seen the little guy with the lantern? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2224 Hurry up! This one-percenter is doing his part. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2225 And once the edges are perfect I like to finish up with some 100 grit sandpaper 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2226 I guess it is the motion in the ocean! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2227 I can only imagine what he's going to be like as a teenager. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2228 Now who's the one-percenter? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2229 Wait! Heads I win tails you loose? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2230 the smaller the tool the more you put into it 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2231 Rick, remember when you laughed at my shovel purchase in July? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2232 Have you found that contact yet Marge ? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2233 Son, may I please borrow your SUV today? My Smartcar is horrible in the snow. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2234 I wish, son. You’ll understand this demonstration and hate me for it when you get older. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2235 You don't have to understand me now son, but someday when you're living with someone, you will. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2236 All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. All work and ... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2237 "My Lazy Eye does NOT run all the way down to my boots! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2238 Thanks anyway, kid, but I get paid by the hour. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2239 The road to hell is plowed with good intentions. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2240 Good way to make up for last year's coal error. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2241 Yes, tell your grandmother I'll be in as soon as I'm done shoveling the walk 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2242 That's funny. I'm big and have a small shovel, and you're small and have a big shovel. Go figure. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2243 You know, it is now my turn to play with the big shovel? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2244 Now you return it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2245 Once you analyze the "shoveler body mass to shovel blade surface area" ratio....you will be leaping at this opportunity to clobber your old man ! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2246 Didn't you listen to your mom, work harder not smarter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2247 Help! Having...tiny...heart attack.... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2248 Always remember, son - size doesn't matter. It's how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2249 Size doesn't matter as much as technique. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2250 So much for disruptive technology. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2251 I tried flipping the pancakes with this, but I would really prefer that spatula. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2252 Global success 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2253 I would help you kid but, I am running late for my aerobics class. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2254 Some day you'll thank me for this. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2255 See? The trick is to bend your knees and push. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2256 Ain't know one got time for dat 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2257 Are we done yet? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2258 It's not the size but how you use it, son! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2259 What is this thing in my left hand? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2260 See? If it works for prisoners, . . . 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2261 I'm still not paying you $100 per hour! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2262 Suddenly Mr. Jones realized he had never paid little Jimmy for all the snow shoveling all winter long and now it was payback time. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2263 Where's my bailout? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2264 Crikey, Littl' Pawn, look! Our sidewalk resembles a chess Knight's move! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2265 Opposites attract. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2266 With ultimate power comes ultimate responsibility. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2267 I appreciate your ambition, son. It seems you can take it from here. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2268 Just making a Frosty the Snow Cocktail. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2269 Its' called trickle down economics. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2270 So I've shoveled the walk and you're my witness. I'm off for your mother. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2271 Keep digging. You're close to the treasure. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2272 And, you thought I wasn't a feminist. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2273 Look Junior, the hours I waste shoveling the walk are my time away. What do you want? I'll give you anything - just don't let your mother know about this efficient snow removal tool! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2274 Yes, son, I know 'Child is father to the man.' But if you don't give me back my shovel, I'm telling mommy! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2275 Like father,like son! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2276 Good work, keep it up! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2277 This makes snow sense! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2278 I told you, it's not what you have, it's how you use it 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2279 Silly boy. You're shoveling the yard again. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2280 Hey, I borrowed your ice cream scooper. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2281 Holler if you need me. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2282 You did a great job on the walk, but I get to use the big shovel next time. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2283 Get used to it son. I'll always expect you to do more than me. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2284 Hey, at least I'm prepared for global warming! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2285 After I conquer this shovel, do I get the big one Master? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2286 Your allowance is shrinking by the minute, Tom. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2287 Dad, use this. Trump comes on in five ten minutes. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2288 It's all about perspective. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2289 You don't think salt will do it? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2290 Using this sand shovel and imagining I'm at the beach DOES make it feel warmer. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2291 It's not the size of the equipment son, it's...it's...well that's not really the point. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2292 No, mine is under here somewhere. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2293 Next time we make a bet, it will have nothing to do with foreign affairs. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2294 Home Depot may have implemented affirmative action, but I'm still a better shoveller 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2295 If I upgrade to the larger one I may get stuck holding it for 4 hours 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2296 I gave up efficiency for lent. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2297 enough already. I'm walking to Florida. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2298 Forget character. You're learning a valuable lesson in strategizing expectations. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2299 You're the best, Mrs. G! Thanks for having my favorite popsicle on hand for me! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2300 I guess the catbox was not the first place I should have gone looking for the shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2301 I don't understand it either but The New Yorker recommended this strategy. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2302 It's not the size of your shovel but what you do with it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2303 Don't worry, we'll make it one scoop at a time. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2304 You know what they say about small shovels. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2305 When people take opposite day really seriously. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2306 Looks like someone is overcompensating. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2307 Why don't you use a small shovel? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2308 Okay, it's time to give Grandpa the Big Boy shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2309 It's the newest shovel, global warming edition. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2310 I think the boss had one too many and then wrote the job order. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2311 So what if it you think it's a matter of too-much-man-and-not-enough-shovel? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2312 At the end of the day, son, it's not the size of the shovel but what you do with it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2313 Don't even try to nominate a shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2314 No, I said 'chisel-tip' 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2315 It's what you do with it that counts. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2316 Who said life is fair, son? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2317 Let's trade shovels! 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2318 You're good. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2319 Butt out, kid, I'm on a roll... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2320 This is as good a time as any to teach you that size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2321 $50 or the snow goes back on the sidewalk. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2322 I thought I told you to grab the big shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2323 Haunted by the specter of his own childhood inadequacies, Oliver overcompensates by "showing off." 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2324 Let me demonstrate. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2325 My shovel is recommeded by eight out of ten members of the American Orthopedic Surgeons Association. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2326 ...and here I thought Florida was supposed to be an escape from the frozen north, and I'd never need a snow shovel again!!! 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2327 Now let's talk about your allowance. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2328 Hey you better watch out, I think my old eyes see an avalanche headin' our way. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2329 Somehow the trade seemed inevitable, albeit a bit late. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2330 It ain't all about the size of the boat. It's the motion of the ocean. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2331 Hi-tech my ass! I'll bet, you can't slide down a chimney with that thing! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2332 You WANTED my big shovel................I GAVE you my big shovel............ Now what's wrong ? ! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2333 Make the sidewalk great again 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2334 Thanks, son. But I prefer this one as a metaphor for my life. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2335 Joe's cold reminder he is not in the 1%. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2336 No, you can use that one. I don't mind. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2337 Laugh! I like to make my fun in the snow to last. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2338 Mom says 'Happy belated anniversary!" 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2339 If I want your advice, I'll ask for it! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2340 Don't look at me like that, there's a reason why I want to stay out here longer. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2341 Extremes are not cool. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2342 It's not the arrow - it's the Indian. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2343 I love the smell of global warming in the morning. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2344 Doctor's orders, son! I have to cut back on everything! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2345 Son: Santa is a myth! You want to sweep the roof, go for it! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2346 My doctor advised me to shovel slowly and fill the shovel with small loads of snow. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2347 Call the Obesity Police: I've found the Abdomenable Showman. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2348 Pitch one of them snowballs in here. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2349 still overcompensating? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2350 Hey Kid...Remember What President Sanders Said About Hard Work: Don't! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2351 I worked hard to get this shovel. No handouts. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2352 Mommy hid it because she didn't want you to have a heart attack. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2353 Trust me son, you have the easier job. Don't look at me like that. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2354 How do you feel about global warming? 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2355 Looks like he had one too many drinks last night. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2356 No thanks. Go back in - I'll be a couple more hours. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2357 Like I told you, son, size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2358 It's called Tough Love. Or Father Knows Best. Or something... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2359 I'm defecting to Cuba. Don't tell your mother. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2360 Bernie Sanders Weekly Press Release: Youth Equity 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2361 I hope you never have to hear this again son, but remember, it's not the size of your tool that counts. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2362 I told you winter was coming. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2363 Yes, I could use a bigger shovel but I want to see if I can get the feel of what it is like to go through life with a micro penis. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2364 Young people have lots of drive but no ability. Adults have lots of ability but little drive. We work together and we might just finish before your mom comes home. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2365 I also found this in the sandbox. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2366 If only I had bought two big shovels. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2367 Outsourcing works this way at my company too, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2368 See, it's no different than shoveling sand at the beach. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2369 Shovel Envy 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2370 As I told your mother, bigger is not necessarily better. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2371 This is what we get for shopping on Craigslist. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2372 I see we have a future politician in the family. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2373 " Have fun, Im going to "DISNEYLAND". 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2374 Sorry I mentioned we switch tools, Napoleon. Carry on! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2375 Hey son, this is what I call teamwork! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2376 Your find in life Son the Devil is in the detail 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2377 You can take this job and shovel it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2378 Well, at least I have one important thing bigger than you. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2379 Mr. Hitchcock and his gnome enjoyed the changing seasons. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2380 Faster. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2381 Someday you will learn, son, that it helps to adapt when you're not well endowed. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2382 It's shovel full, not mindful. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2383 Grandpa wants to know if you would like a cup of hot Coco? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2384 Ok,now do you see the difference between a Daddy shovel and a little boy's shovel? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2385 What? Lady, my name's Melvin, not Sisyphus. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2386 I guess it's true, it's not the size of the shovel, but the size of the shoveler ! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2387 Short man. Tall Shovel 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2388 Thank you. I feel validated. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2389 So who wants to grow up big and strong like you, Daddy, now? 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2390 Remember Son, it's not the size of your shovel, but how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2391 Daddy, suffering independence or socialist leanings? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2392 Why didn’t I think of buying a bigger shovel? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2393 Mrs. Robinson, weren’t you the one that taught me that it’s not the size of your shovel but it’s how you swivel it? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2394 Mommy said it was right in the garage where she said it was??? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2395 Don't speak so softly. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2396 And that's how men did it when they were your age. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2397 Just look at your old man go! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2398 Damn Daniel!! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2399 You told me that size doesn't count for everything. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2400 I am getting paid by the hour. How about you?? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2401 I'm almost finished,then we'll play 1.0000 0.22361 5 5 0 0
2402 Hey, when I was your age, I didn't get any help shoveling. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2403 Good, son. Now as to the other meaning of the term, 'snow job....' 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2404 Remember, kid: it's a marathon, not a sprint. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2405 Where's Casey Neistat when you need a laugh !!!!!!!!! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2406 Son, you do it like this. . . 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2407 I'm getting you ready to work for The Man. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2408 As you might have surmised, son, this is a lesson about size. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2409 It's all relative. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2410 Now Marvin, you just do what I do and we'll be finished in no time! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2411 You've got the driveway shovel, so get started! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2412 Son, remember this lesson if a woman ever tells you that size matters. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2413 Shovel it. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2414 You're a troll... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2415 Your mom doesn't want me to vote for Bernie. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2416 Shovel-off! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2417 Your mother used all the driveway salt in the pasta. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2418 And better yet, it runs off just two triple A batteries. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2419 Pop, let's trade, I'll take the shovel you take this spatula! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2420 No you know how I feel when we go to the beach. 1.0000 0.11785 9 9 0 0
2421 And this is what would happen if Washington bureaucrats told us how to live our lives son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2422 It's Silicone. You should get one. Kitchen Gadgets Online. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2423 Thank you, no. I'm been doing fine with my silicone spatula and timely shots of non-stick cooking spray. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2424 I'll trade you this spoon and a Happy Meal, for the shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2425 Junior! It's not the size but how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2426 It's never too early to learn how to shovel it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2427 Son, I know what your teacher said but taking turns isn't always a good thing. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2428 c'mon, Ma...cigarette break's over 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2429 All I can tell you is that there's a proverb here somewhere. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2430 Son - your mother just told us to shovel the sidewalk. She did not specify how quickly she would like us to complete the task. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2431 Norm realized smaller does mean better! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2432 Everyone, son, has their own path and their own journey. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2433 This new Technology is making my hard work obsolete! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2434 I triple dog dare you! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2435 What did you expect? I'm for Bernie Sanders. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2436 It's cotton candy, Bro! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2437 If this turns to rain, I'll take your umbrella. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2438 You'll understand when you're old enough to drink coffee. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2439 Now you go out and sign up three more kids to shovel; that's how you retire early. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2440 I told you our therapist is wrong -- size does matter! 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2441 You knew going into this business venture that I was the brains and YOU were the muscle! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2442 Bend at your knees! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2443 Get on the walkway dummy! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2444 You're handling it with kid gloves. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2445 That's the last time you tell Mom about Dad's secret beer cooler. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2446 Go tell Mom she wins, we're moving to Florida. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2447 Oh no, life's nothing but an Etcha-a-S . . . 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2448 It is all in how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2449 Don't judge a man by its cover. A little man can sometimes do more than a big man. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2450 Yes, my shovel is 99% bigger, but you're 99% bigger than me. So it works out. Keep shoveling. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2451 I call this the 'Bernie Sanders' strategy. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2452 I had to win the gambling with a son and get bigger one... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2453 Wanna swap? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2454 Call your mother. This could go viral. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2455 Is he holding the shovel or is the shovel holding him? 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2456 Do you have to condensate for something over there? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2457 It is quality, not quantity, that is the most personally satisfying. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2458 Like I say, size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2459 Whadya mean "What am I doing here"? I'm the latest conceptual art installation from the Museum of Contemporary Art. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2460 'Lazy kids will do anything to avoid work." 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2461 Hey dad! Mom told me to bring this to you. She thinks you are avoiding her!!! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2462 Remember, not a word about my 'stamina' to your mother. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2463 You're learning a trade, kid. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2464 I should have gone to Costco also. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2465 Son, I told you to get the shovel your size... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2466 Over here, Johnney. Like this. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2467 You're sure your mother's inside? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2468 I'm glad you are helping me son! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2469 '...Let's swap wives too' 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2470 He's got his mother's biceps 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2471 Because the snow is heavier up here, that's why. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2472 When you could'nt afford an expensive snow shovel, but Santa gave it to you for Christmas... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2473 Hey Dad... FEEL THE BERN! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2474 That's what you call a shovel. This is a SHOVEL 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2475 Have a nice Spring! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2476 I will trade you for that "scoop" shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2477 Next we have to do the driveway. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2478 Hey kid. Get busy! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2479 See? That what you get with socialist redistribution. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2480 I know your wife told you that size doesn't matter. But... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2481 Sunny Boy! A credit card on a popsicle stick is all you need! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2482 You ask why? Because I'm the father. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2483 I figure that by the time I finish, the snow will have melted. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2484 I told you not to stop! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2485 Mom says she needs that spatula for the flapjacks. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2486 I can't feel my face when I'm with you 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2487 John was ironic; his wife was a surrealist. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2488 It's not the size of the tool, son, it's whether your gonna use the darn thing. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2489 See, it's about the motion of the ocean, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2490 You're right, dear. My shovel works a lot better. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2491 Is this the Mr. Softie residence . 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2492 It is a Lake House and I am getting close. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2493 there's an obvious dick joke here, but i'm not going to tell it because you're eight and i suspect it's not, like, good parenting to give you the impression that i've spent a lot of time considering the sizes of dicks 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2494 It's not about the size of your shovel son, more in how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2495 The Mystery: Why big man are usually "small". 1.0000 0.11785 9 9 0 0
2496 Remember, son, it's not the size of your shovel but how you throw the snow! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2497 I'm totally taking the fifth. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2498 Remember kid, it's not the size of the shovel, but how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2499 It's Effective! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2500 Some women might tell you that size matters, but I know my wife. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2501 A convenient mixup, mom. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2502 Wanna exchange shovels? 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2503 Your mother didn't say, "size never matters? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2504 It's all perspective, Bobby. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2505 I prefer quality snow removal to quanity. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2506 No, as far as I know, there isn't 'an Uber for this'. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2507 Looks like you've got it covered when push comes to shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2508 "...Then use this micro shovel for more intricate detailing of your shoveled path.. Got it? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2509 I happen to like the snow. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2510 Just because you won the bet, Joey, please don't tell mommy that we could have been finished two hours ago! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2511 What's bigger than mine? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2512 Watch closely, this is how my father taught me. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2513 I don't need your help. I have an appointment with my proctologist when I finish. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2514 Who said rightsize? 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2515 You mean it's not "work harder, not smarter"? 1.0000 0.11785 9 9 0 0
2516 Sizable effort trumps sizable tools. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2517 Hey hey, we're The Monkees... and people say we monkey around! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2518 Betty, I think it's time we stop buying our snow shovels from the clearance section. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2519 What do you think you're gonna do with that? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2520 Please say, you see what I mean. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2521 Your mom may be right about Tiger Parenting. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2522 I said "No, thank you.", not "Snow? Thank you!" 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2523 Son, it's not the size of the shovel that matters, but how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2524 People are like pigs” JP's muttered during a rush-hour epiphany, “We look up only when we get knocked flat on our backs. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2525 Years of psychotherapy for not letting people walk all over him was clearly a colossal fail! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2526 Thomas, you look tired? Would it be alright if Daddy uses the big shovel for a while? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2527 The next storm is yours. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2528 ...and I bet it's your bra I'm wearing, too. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2529 I need a pick-me-up. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2530 At least it's quieter than your jet turbine leaf blower! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2531 Don't shovel snow on me, this isn't really a snowball. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2532 Wanna trade, Big Boy? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2533 Shoveling snow?" "No, burying a groundhog - early end to winter my ass. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2534 It's an absolute law of physics --- opposites attract. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2535 It's my fair share. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2536 Honestly, I only picked the little shovel because you wanted it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2537 I don't what's worse--the fact that you're standing on the lawn instead of helping or that we have our forced perspective shovels mixed up. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2538 You can't rush perfection. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2539 No, I won't trade shovels. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2540 Finally, I'm going to be the first in line to get something! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2541 A winter dunderland 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2542 Sorry, it's freaky Friday. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2543 Labor laws!? What child labor laws? 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2544 You're a horse's ass, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2545 Lame or not, Dylan, a curse is a curse. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2546 Think of it like a game - you're the middle class and the snow is taxes. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2547 It's all about perspective, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2548 That's it, Hon. Just one heaping shovel at a time. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2549 Would you please dig a six-foot hole and climb into it, son? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2550 You know work is just another four letter word 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2551 Fifteen bucks an hour and I'll tell the rest of the third grade to stand down. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2552 The global warming generation, ha! Can't even handle a little snow storm. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2553 This is about pride, son. Your mother says small tools are ineffectual. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2554 Size doesn't matter; it's how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2555 You know, there's an app for that. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2556 The trowel troll strikes again. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2557 You have to follow through. Like this. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2558 Not only that, but it also comes with 100 anytime minutes and 50 gigs of memory. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2559 Sometimes bigger just isn't better! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2560 So ironic. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2561 Snow, stocks, life, whatever. It's all about leverage. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2562 Well, that's my perspective. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2563 It's how you use the stick not the size of it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2564 Switch? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2565 They were still having fun after hours of shuffling! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2566 Good heavens! It's a 'white out' . 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2567 Is that shovel big enough for you? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2568 Can we keep this quick? I've gotta go to the sandbox in half an hour. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2569 Making snow cones, how about you? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2570 It's called cross training. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2571 Don't let my technique discourage you. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2572 Have you seen the mint chocolate chip? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2573 See, I told you size doesn't matter 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2574 Billionaires... 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2575 Good Lord, how many cats do you have? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2576 better clean up before I get my coffee 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2577 Where there's a will, there's a path. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2578 Just sign the union agreement and this can be yours! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2579 That would have been helpful twelve hours ago. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2580 Ergonomics 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2581 Learn from my mistakes, son, and never, ever forget your wedding anniversary. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2582 No, I don't cur my lawn with scissors 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2583 It's a myth: size does NOT matter! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2584 Snow again?! Interrupting the gerrymandering process. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2585 When I told you to shovel your own weight, I didn't mean for you to include the shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2586 I thought you garden gnomes worked just in the summer. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2587 S.O.S., you bet! Same old--same old snow! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2588 No thanks Ed, I don’t need to borrow your shovel, I’m getting paid by the hour! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2589 Thanks for your good deed! See ya around sometime! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2590 I was hoping you would get the caption. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2591 Hmm, should I tell him he's shoveling wrong? Nope, wait until he's done. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2592 You'll understand when you have your own kids. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2593 And we use this little guy for smaller, non-fatal heart attacks, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2594 Hey Dad - last night I heard Mom say your tool isn't big enough. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2595 Call me a "simpleton" again and you'll be wearing my boots as well, young man. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2596 It's not about size, but keeping a healthy emotional connection with your shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2597 You have a lot to learn son. Bah! Shoveling the lawn! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2598 So you're telling me that size does matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2599 No, I am not complaining. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2600 It's just shrinkage. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2601 Want to trade shovels 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2602 From each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2603 I see that someone has already wiped the smirk off your face. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2604 shut up, I know I should of called heads 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2605 Ah, the ambiguity of the paradox of scale. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2606 Don't worry son. I'll be back to help you after the big convention in Miami. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2607 It must be opposites day. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2608 You'll regret buying that once global warming kicks in. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2609 NOW you tell me you left it laying on the lawn? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2610 It's not the size of the tool that matters, it's how you use it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2611 Does this make history look like fun? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2612 Up yours! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2613 This reminds me of a cartoon in 'Family Circle.' 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2614 The doctor suggested smaller portions. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2615 You remind me of Jeb! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2616 We can do this the hard way or we can do this the easy way, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2617 Bring me the Tonka skiploader from your toy box. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2618 Son, as I told you, size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2619 Because I'm the boss -- get used to it! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2620 The other way! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2621 No thanks--I've downsized. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2622 Yeah, that was a government shovel. Too big. Gets nothing done. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2623 son, remember it not how much you shovel but how much you feel that you shoveled. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2624 No thanks - It's probably best that I don't get to Flint for a couple months. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2625 You tell your mother that's she not funny. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2626 2 + 1 ? 1 + 2 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2627 Well you wanted to play in the snow. Why don’t you stay out a couple more hours and clean off the roof. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2628 Compensating much, Larry? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2629 Think Big,you'll grow to love it 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2630 Are political ideologies going on here? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2631 Pitchers and catchers report ... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2632 I knew this weird combo-deal I got would make sense one day. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2633 Two out of three ain't bad is bull, Jeb! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2634 Why don't you try with a smaller shovel instead? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2635 The weird part is that I made it 43 years WITHOUT stepping on a crack . 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2636 See honey -- size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2637 Once again, there's no emoji to encapsulate this moment. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2638 You kids these days want the easy way out. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2639 What are you looking at? I only have a townhome. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2640 Getting paid by the hour eh? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2641 We're trading my allowance for your pay check too, right? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2642 I'll just be over here till spring...don't mind me 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2643 Your shovel is too small. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2644 But mom why does Timmy get the big shovel 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2645 This wasn't what I had in mind when I said "a little help!" 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2646 ...and it's an ice cream scoop. So, do you want to trade? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2647 Hypothermia or no, much safer finding Mom with this, son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2648 Mom says to tell you size does matter. ["does" underscored or in italics.] 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2649 Son, as my father would always say to me in a tone I never understood, ' You genius... keep working hard, not smart. You have a real bright future ahead of you.' 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2650 This expands my capacity to 10,000. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2651 Convinced? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2652 YOU said no snowblower this year. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2653 "Wait'll next week. It'll all be gone". 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2654 You can stop looking, there's no App for this. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2655 You're as funny as a heart attack. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2656 Yeah, well your mom says you're the right tool for the job. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2657 Oh! That's what practical means. I thought is was some kind of fish fillet. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2658 Jeb listen to your Mother hurry we are heading to South Carolina. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2659 Quit complaining and keep digging. How do you think I learned to do this? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2660 Hear dad use this one, so I can get there before I have to shave! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2661 It's not the size of the tool but how you use it Freddie. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2662 What are you trying to compensate for, Stan? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2663 You'll understand when you're older. It's not the size of the tool-- it's how you use it. 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2664 The elder Johnson was always skeptical of new technology. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2665 Hurry up, I'm working from home today. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2666 Redrum..Redrum...Redrum . 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2667 Just like my wife says, size isn't everything! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2668 Dad, stop throwing rocks! 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2669 You were expecting the same results as running in place? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2670 Honey, like I always tell you, it's not about the size. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2671 Shovel faster, Timmy, or the ice cream in this come will be all melted! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2672 I'm sorry, I can't read that when it's upside down 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2673 No, Henry, I am not eating a Popsicle. Let's just get on with our work shall we? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2674 What do you mean, mother said the size DOES matter??? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2675 The poor and the under educated have to do the heavy lifting, that's how America works son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2676 Question: What's wrong with this picture? Answer: My neighbor has cleared part of his sidewalk even before the snow melted for a change. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2677 All I asked for was a little help clearing the snow . . . a Gnome from Nome and a soup spoon is what I got 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2678 Thanks a lot, Santa -- there goes my excuse not to go in to work! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2679 Quit trying that antique and use this app I just downloaded. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2680 See, this is how the GOP has fixed our economy. I'm so big I can dominate the market even though you have a much better product. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2681 It's like coloring. I'll make the lines and you fill them in. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2682 Son. The key to success, is to do more with less. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2683 Well yes, I do feel a bit silly. But it's just part of the new economy. I'm 52 and rushing a fraternity. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2684 Are you from the future? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2685 Don't give me that size and motion crap. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2686 I am starting to understand why your grass is always greener. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2687 I'm showing your mom that size isn't everything. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2688 Son, I've told you a thousand times it's not about the wand, it's about the magician. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2689 where's the Johnny Snow Plow you got for Christmas ? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2690 Stop complaining, Doris. You know I am better at detail work. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2691 I take back what I said. Never share. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2692 I bet you drive a sports car too! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2693 Hey kid, it’s not always about the size of the tool. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2694 Son, I'm paying myself by the hour, not the job. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2695 Do you think I'm ready for the big boy shovel yet? Please. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2696 It's cheaper than the sessions with my Mistress. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2697 Dang, if he tries to switch shovels with me I'll lose my excuse to be outside to blow gas. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2698 If anyone trips, call me today for a free legal consultation. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2699 Do this systematically and we can find that buried snow plough 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2700 Maybe I should have left David Ricardo and Adam Smith out of his home schooling curriculum. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2701 You can have it back when we're done, and no more singing "Hi Ho, Hi Ho"! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2702 I suppose that's your mother's idea. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2703 You can tell your mother I prefer this one. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2704 G. I. Joe doesn't use a snow blower, just a toy shovel. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2705 You see, your mother was wrong: small and fast beats large and slow. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2706 Yes, Bernie, that is a yuuge shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2707 Sir, would you still need my shovel? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2708 Ok the GPS says we are getting closer to finding the car! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2709 Isn't it your nap time? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2710 Yes, people walk all over me but it's an improvement. I used to be a pushover. Ouch. And before that I was constantly screwed over. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2711 Who said Bigger was better! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2712 There may be some lingering resentment. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2713 This isn't what I meant when I said all you need is good work ethic. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2714 Are you aware that I use to walk 7 miles to school every day? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2715 Is this my final boss? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2716 Well dad, I'm doing as best as I can. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2717 When you are CEO... 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2718 No Buddy! We don't need another Big Dig. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2719 So, son, that is why there are Republicans and Democrats. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2720 So much for partly cloudy and seasonably cool 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2721 You'll understand when you're older. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2722 In the footsteps of Rembrandt 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2723 You know what they say about a guy with a small shovel. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2724 Don't stop me when I'm on a roll. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2725 Our walk's done, Billy. We'll handle the rest with carve-outs. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2726 You see now how my suggestion of the shovel as a conceptual tool really works . 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2727 It's how you use it, that matters most. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2728 Dad, remind me one more time how Socialism works ! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2729 Busted Crystal Balls 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2730 The small shovel is just a gag to make you smile. Your mother and I are getting a divorce. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2731 At that moment Harokd had both a deep feeling of pride and foreboding 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2732 Does Santa know you are moonlighting? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2733 Where were you three hours ago? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2734 It's not about size. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2735 Babe, nobody thought Paul Bunyan's ax could beat the chain saw either. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2736 Ed's chakra takes over. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2737 They say that, "Little strokes fell mighty oaks," but I think you might be onto something! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2738 Just lift with your legs son. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2739 Alright, so it's not as easy as it looks. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2740 My doctor told me that using a snow shovel could lead to a heart attack. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2741 I may have to reconsider my belief in global warming. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2742 Quick! Before the wolves come! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2743 The yellow snow is gluten free 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2744 Daddy will take it from here, Sparky. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2745 I'm setting you up for success. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2746 Hey Tom, what time does Dumb and Dumber come on? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2747 Your mother says she thinks you might be gay. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2748 Is it big enough now Edith? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2749 Yours is an ice shovel too; look what friction does. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2750 Just move to Southern California and size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2751 F-f-f-focused micromanaging. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2752 You're receiving a warning from the Association Ralph for the imperfectly shoveled walkway. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2753 Thanks anyway kid but this is heart attack snow. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2754 Explain to me your upgrade program again? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2755 Where've you been? You could have talked me out of this days ago. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2756 I told you size has got nothing to do with it. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2757 The economy size gets better mileage. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2758 Plooity Doop. PLOOITY DOOP. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2759 You see It's not a he size of the tool, it's the enthusiasm behind its use! 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2760 It's a smart shovel. It knows flake by flake what to do. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2761 Heh. Looks like somebody's compensating. Not me. Look how small my shovel is. You know what means, don't you, kid? You got a small dick. I got a big one. Ask your mother if you don't believe me. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2762 Sorry, that big shovel hurts my back. 1.0000 0.11785 9 9 0 0
2763 I'm already rushing to spend time with your mother!! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2764 Need some hot chocolate? 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2765 Hey Mister, I'm outsourcing snow removal. I can get you started in the gig economy. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2766 It's not the size of the shovel, it's how you use it that matters. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2767 I think I saw my opposite gender doppelgänger in there. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2768 You're not in Wonderland, Alice! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2769 Think of it as preparation for the 2036 Winter Olympics. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2770 Supply and demand be damned! I'm not paying $100 for smsnow shovel." 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2771 'I'll shovel off to the mailbox, I need you to shovel off to Buffalo.' 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2772 I'll shovel the Trump fans' driveways. You can flip their yard signs. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2773 it's all in the legs! 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2774 A spade's a spade son 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2775 Who drew this picture? It makes no sense. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2776 It isn't the size of the shovel that counts...it's the technique. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2777 I'm no different than the rest of you, just more comfortable. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2778 Look, we're not shoveling snow; we're building character, (brat)." 1.0000 0.13363 8 8 0 0
2779 Honey, the other shovel makes my hand look smaller. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2780 It's makes total sense when you realize it's cocaine. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2781 A spoonful of sugar helps the snowbank go down. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2782 I told you, size doesn't matter. 1.0000 0.18257 6 6 0 0
2783 Here, dad, try this one. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7 0 0
2784 We should switch shovels, Shorty. 1.0000 0.15430 7 7